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mentalhealth,Autumfire117,2020/01/01,"Not depressed or suicidal, yet the thought of taking my life sticks with me I used to be severely depressed and I attempted suicide 2-3 times (not quite sure as I have a few periods of my life that are really hazy, because, well, depression fucks up your memory), in the span of a few years. My family never found out because each time I woke up, having failed, before anyone found me. 

I am eternally grateful I failed, and that my parents won't ever have to bear that burden.

Because I am much better now. After years of therapy and really prioritising my mental health, I can finally say I know what happiness feels like. 

And I can say without lying that I don't want to die, that I want to live. Because I truly want more time with the people I love, to grow and experience life, its ups and downs, and what it's like to be happy for more than a day. 

Sure I still have depressive episodes, but they last a shorter and shorter amount of time, and they come much less often. I now know they're temporary, so, for me, it's easier to push through.

Yet the thought of death still seems so nice and peaceful, and not scary at all. The phrase 'the sweet embrace of death', still rings true to me, so much so, that I still think about jumping off a roof into the quiet realm of nothingness. It feels like it's easier to just be dead than to have to deal with emotions - good or bad, that are just too overwhelming and intense at times to bear. I still yearn to just let go, to just stop... living...

Despite actually loving what my life is right now, and despite being true to myself for the first time ever??

I guess I just don't get why it's still so tempting despite me really enjoying life for once. It's like I have to hold myself back all the time, and I just thought that would end once I got better, but it just hasn't...

Anyone else feel like this, or am I just doomed to walk around wanting to off myself every chance I get, without really wanting to?",6.283510520487263,5.687673105943155,6.568202288667402,80.79511627906977,66.00258397932815,9.955407899593943,30.314876338132148,9.362217197678863,2.3700814322628263,1520,46,311,25,21,491,184,387,0.11599999999999999,0.6809999999999999,0.203,0.9862,1,0,0,0,0,3,58.0,0,1,2,7,33,32,1,1,14,0,24,9,0,1,9,73,53,25,6,7,18,1,3,5,0,2,6,4,0,0,20,22,0,2,12,0,0,6,11,12,1,1,7,8,42,20,54,39,12,53,1,9,0,3,9,14,1,6,38,220,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.07065164925868006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124708694318713,0.07418203358416313,0.0,0.06445106971136262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055670889176425306,0.060450713247804974,0.17653670514204572,0.0,0.061606799863734976,0.0,0.0,0.12806327663688027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062365918343924666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046691807664924416,0.07464089668133278,0.24943097209917514,0.0,0.07513944310308297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060480647102703115,0.08143990144571864,0.0641246319795587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309793209730133,0.06099985759869867,0.0,0.0,0.07082078482029082,0.06825198007357873,0.0,0.1098223690536517,0.15516704934197298,0.0,0.0793103165863323,0.0,0.061583135492945786,0.0,0.15876503641898898,0.0,0.06693234260311147,0.0756516949640822,0.0,0.04114640971574017,0.06072542120974048,0.05790464232400641,0.0,0.07975641598066044,0.0,0.0,0.15414162294294492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695748011463095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957794746061805,0.059015406732175375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403358364295104,0.25569019487557,0.1768541464067878,0.0,0.12786049742393232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306870856555033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296185438680909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15966629775061306,0.0,0.05583910074941907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420660435483255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039128281223809,0.0,0.0,0.050192825948662166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770059773727402,0.0,0.0,0.18552436970082653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618289358238497,0.0,0.11515027162551268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590995452866127,0.0,0.08179103685327145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3469108941318905,0.06052937891349596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583870099646167,0.0,0.13647169351969854,0.0,0.05443555323693309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279535005370814,0.0,0.0,0.046390795091233686,0.0,0.1724317894686769,0.2955178718270988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253008268115727,0.0,0.0,0.2135160515677584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650960121087742,0.0,0.06532945510459925,0.0,0.0,0.1395814264483594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05143065932409774,0.0,0.0,0.09324604747809002
mentalhealth,elf_boy_,2020/01/01,"How I Barely Survived the Last Decade Trigger warnings: Depression, suicide, self harm, anxiety, bullying, eating disorders

First of all, I was only 5 at the beginning of the decade so I will be skipping forward a couple years. I have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, social anxiety disorder, and gender dysphoria. A big part of my depression and anxiety comes from genetics but that has caused other issues that derived from the original genetic issue.

My earliest memory of depression was in 3rd grade (8/9 years old) when I was living in (arguably) the most beautiful place in the world for a year, Hawaii. I remember asking my parents if I could go to therapy because I was getting too upset too often, and that's about all that happened. I went to a therapist for a few months but then we moved back to my current home/state and nothing ever came after that for a few years. 

My symptoms of depression and anxiety skyrocketed to become very severe when I got into 8th grade (11/12 years old I think). I also began going through puberty which anyone with gender dysphoria knows is one hell of a time. I was having a lot of social issues and began self harming a lot. A past classmate and friend who I confided in about my depression told my parents who found all my self harm marks and put me into therapy. 

I hate therapy and even the idea is therapy. The first therapist I saw did not help me at all. Part of that was my fault because I withheld so much information from her but another part was she just wasn't the right fit for me. I tried to put out my signals of distress many times to my friends but nothing came of those. Looking back I know it was unfair for me to expect a group of 12 year olds to help and deal with my severe depression especially when a lot of them were involved with the social issues I was having. 

Over the course of middle school (6th-8th grade) I also developed an eating disorder. This were never diagnosed by a professional because I never told anyone but I'd assume that forcing myself to throw up the lunch I just ate would classify me as bulimic. 

Middle school ages are hard enough as it is but at that time it felt like I was dealing with 1 million added problems from my peers. I was honestly counting down the days until my mental illnesses took my life. I was only 12 years old. To add to all of this I was realizing I was bisexual and had a lot of internalized anxiety and self hatred for that. 

Fast forward to 8th grade (13/14 years old) my parents had finally decided to transfer me to a different school since i was having so many issues. My 8th grade year was NOT perfect but it was at the time a massive improvement. 

In 8th grade i became best friends with someone extremely manipulative. I hadn't noticed his manipulative nature, though, and was very dedicated and loyal to our friendship. This friendship caused me a lot of issues towards the end of 8th grade and in the beginning of highschool. 

Overall in middle school I believe I was hospitalized 3 times. Once in 7th grade and twice in 8th grade. 2 times were by my parents and once was from a ""medical professional"" who wrongfully called the hospital and forced me into hospitalization (I got out as soon as I talked to a doctor because that woman was in the wrong). 

In 9th grade (14/15) I ended up going to the same high school as my now ex-friend, the manipulator. I still had a little hope we could repair our friendship but that hope quickly when he started spreading rumors about me and my mental health. At this point I was still 100% I the closet about my sexuality and gender, had stopped self harming, and I believe had recovered from my eating disorders.

I had gotten into a long distance online relationship and while that relationship was not awful when it ended it took a hard toll on me. At that point I had had so many people I cared for leave me for seemingly no reason which has and still does cause me a lot of clingy issues to this day. 

In late 9th grade I came out as bisexual and a transgender man. Shortly after that the therapist I had been talking to for 2+ years (who I loved and helped me a lot) said that she didn't think she was supporting me in a way I needed and advised i find a different therapist. That, understandably, messed me up. Like I said, I had an issue with people suddenly leaving which she knew and I felt very wronged by her decision. I did find a therapist, though, and still talk to him to this day. He is great. 

At this point I had been on a bunch of medications. I started taking medication after my first hospitalization and have been on so many different kinds, doses, and mixtures that my mom keeps a list of everything I've tried. Medication has never helped me, I either get negative side effect or it had no effect at all. 

Now, in 10th grade (15/16). There have been a lot of ups and downs since me coming out and finding a new therapist but this post is already so long. My mental health has never improved as much as it did in late 2019.  Things still hurt me but it's been a long time since I last self harmed. People still leave me and that will always still hurt. The most recent person to leave (late November of 2019) had brought a lot of pain onto me. I had returned to one of the darkest places I had been in a very long time. I was very close to relapsing or killing myself. I cried harder than I had in months. But a few days later I had basically recovered completely. It has been the quickest recovery I have ever experienced. 

Just because my biggest improvements happened recently doesn't mean I was happy 24/7, trust me. The thing that changed for me is that I finally feel like I'm gaining control over myself and my emotions. 

""I feel better.""

""I feel better"" are words I never thought I'd be able to say honestly just a few years ago but it's true. I feel better. 

I will never be 100% perfectly ok and thats ok. I lost track of all the times I hurt myself, of all the times I threw up, the times I cried, and the times i tried to take my life. In middle school I thought I'd never live to be 20 years old. I know what it's like to be literal seconds away from killing myself. I've been there, I've taken the pills, I've tied the belt around my neck, I've held the blades, and I'm telling YOU that it's not the right answer. I am telling you, the person reading this, that it will get better. 

I'm 2 weeks away from turning 16 years old. I am no where near done with my mental health journey. Life sucks, it does and there's no denying that. 

But it gets better.",4.953877066471307,6.1396497140612745,5.820521990873548,78.80820198240025,69.14139827179889,9.052063161425279,29.62151689806437,9.363617740826,2.6074348288127664,5198,195,976,106,89,1708,457,1273,0.16699999999999998,0.733,0.1,-0.998,8,0,0,0,0,5,144.0,4,2,1,17,48,60,5,2,74,3,97,25,1,13,20,178,169,81,3,9,25,5,8,4,3,5,18,3,1,10,61,64,5,5,32,1,0,20,20,30,0,8,90,14,151,30,154,67,34,203,1,11,2,1,68,75,2,19,114,693,212,25,0.029328413977724743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025997869416013324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0323646341216326,0.046907844123844716,0.024403589879725483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030753399247166906,0.1346169385053616,0.0,0.0,0.041014217945631655,0.0,0.0,0.02610850642502164,0.0274181080243045,0.0,0.055110020728847305,0.04510348002783019,0.0,0.08939164472162113,0.032390929021935445,0.0,0.0660861586014988,0.030778361050271087,0.12969299407507934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029947589784518832,0.100631677235652,0.029902272686618388,0.09038508011570633,0.03102557317951798,0.05052766345312245,0.030750284059217863,0.0,0.03289431012167725,0.04683270417289565,0.032451332231003216,0.06443177119661203,0.07565760294592203,0.06047261400939603,0.17682363988567834,0.05953544565825272,0.0,0.09192585111602103,0.20167741987859492,0.030018874457509843,0.051330985425202036,0.03001315010705372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003086803736603,0.0,0.032990518228339274,0.07792880894940203,0.030304091618223863,0.0,0.01937114082942731,0.053058459052480335,0.0,0.0,0.026358487376128826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05931730930951201,0.02095222480578076,0.05631975345620584,0.06425568790209546,0.08041691713986633,0.07484020184107633,0.0,0.03215709213188738,0.09063623954765476,0.0,0.06129154327085747,0.0,0.05000404061131895,0.0,0.04691322371918283,0.03233467994883833,0.0,0.0,0.05187003924385482,0.03122064203892991,0.05254499647291077,0.02895573692270308,0.0,0.09352419779956377,0.0,0.0,0.07863287069134033,0.03098707960912985,0.029418790512367624,0.05825946527472905,0.0,0.0,0.09419002124352026,0.03310820951403246,0.0,0.24488995545261144,0.0,0.026068441902624803,0.06489508940062387,0.0305410299798623,0.0483543879536097,0.047813143606230166,0.09925118526800608,0.12421822285493768,0.0,0.0,0.0621465784101356,0.057313526536417414,0.029394775656487408,0.05179505372756711,0.1038188938356838,0.02462848119147969,0.0,0.032015428378196695,0.2244057189286747,0.02647003867262829,0.0,0.0,0.11893763398726626,0.0,0.031947240740918814,0.0,0.11818116630767013,0.11822457269184243,0.0,0.0,0.03434908398632788,0.04681932045525848,0.0311714626199542,0.04311951768838133,0.02174664734549876,0.15833916629294234,0.028325564976601676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05628280840665203,0.03339059370105863,0.2154266582955498,0.062467607420782965,0.039747384673251784,0.04461116083801773,0.031207500279233063,0.0,0.1302629317538863,0.09527944291439322,0.027997289720952383,0.060997888381343984,0.05121687967137334,0.06128390074401401,0.0,0.08317449297032363,0.0,0.028088513468236737,0.0,0.0,0.02806333128785752,0.0,0.0589663132198184,0.0,0.0,0.029336350663067,0.0,0.0,0.030154494209551318,0.05791654119355514,0.06297548151909206,0.033223375804143265,0.05009261057849095,0.0557960756640774,0.02332313195142873,0.0,0.17809152428850902,0.0,0.026699486587125808,0.18357559240910834,0.06626551958737605,0.0,0.07278230134152433,0.0,0.0,0.0896898739080824,0.02484986998902551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04151760473190378,0.0,0.16395196501367432,0.02451986732482376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03208052469742115,0.033281536624492215,0.0,0.03048345177200369,0.044102634690189296,0.07071920464415618,0.05126865303740938,0.0,0.13415838952060444,0.20431529469268966,0.0389689901054064,0.037584926894946635,0.057630035649246826,0.04656696936536385,0.20521960851922624,0.0,0.0,0.05604911279457076,0.0651698941231031,0.05973620376966041,0.03190089254168362,0.0,0.030531913272882967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209950652580546,0.0,0.023279529890215343,0.023525484630270783,0.0,0.0,0.027187733586157056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0208340638164703,0.0961980498992512,0.0,0.2455249814138073
mentalhealth,mcks02,2020/01/01,"Coping skills I was wondering if anyone had any good coping skills that seem to work for them, thank you in advance.

I’ve (18f) been dealing with depression and generalized for about 6-7 years now. I am also considered suicidal. I have the kind of depression where I can’t get out of bed and I’ve been distancing myself from friends. 2019 has been quite the shit show for me, with a lot of family issues and I haven’t felt genuinely happy in months, I’m running out of options and I don’t know what to do. I feel like I’m at my wits end and I am between a rock and a hard place. I can’t be on medication because I have to get other medication in check before starting a new one. 
I feel like my life is in shambles and I have no control.


I’m only alive for other people, it’s not for me. I am alive because of my mom, I can’t leave her, I’m her only child and she adopted me, she is the only parent who wanted Me, my dad told me he never wanted me when I was 7 (he was/still is an abusive alcoholic), and my step dad is no saint either. I can’t leave my boyfriend or my friends either, I can’t bare to hurt them, but I can’t take living anymore.",0.9197773064687168,2.657733593495937,3.307320607988689,90.4008642629905,80.95121951219512,6.22948038176034,21.671261930010605,7.255503002510835,0.6222154825026518,888,27,200,12,23,307,131,246,0.084,0.828,0.08800000000000001,0.2263,1,0,1,0,0,1,28.0,0,1,2,6,5,12,1,0,8,0,27,5,1,1,1,32,45,14,1,3,6,4,4,2,2,0,4,0,1,1,6,13,1,1,6,2,1,3,12,4,0,1,8,4,39,8,27,36,3,21,1,3,0,0,19,10,1,6,10,131,45,1,0.0,0.15038343222910802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135642476753348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150056870666753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631224022395505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587387222405447,0.0887477675492798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474260983581084,0.0,0.10800243481236586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235534576045542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085241557738414,0.21863781566248847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241642806569516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196520521276218,0.0,0.1283525333879977,0.1813481538688447,0.12186633412807665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961213530775815,0.0,0.1326244387287661,0.0,0.0,0.10645729627516544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511228160357172,0.1136984042713482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13587408675145346,0.0,0.0,0.13247501677632642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217115259695394,0.06975376177733038,0.0,0.0,0.2687870333631169,0.0,0.0,0.08964972589159148,0.12401668946183575,0.0,0.1120756561665994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790570564584316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557238733670156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14865111046078086,0.10130901859658824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789112325278054,0.12258337631002955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600655656410636,0.2895928141848877,0.0,0.0,0.14093337587109708,0.0,0.0,0.08799267977819229,0.0,0.13260790160506206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499862141447838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554626410092154,0.0,0.0,0.13028500968576498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983701063943643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388335602292716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543057427022322,0.0,0.0,0.11685398130774087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212807139277838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972537766510455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376429745742622,0.09240172098063662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173448536962068
mentalhealth,IAndrOwS,2020/01/01,"Overcoming a Mental Illness is Like Trying to Lose Weight. Hello. I'm in bed and I just had an idea and I want to share it with you guys. 

I've been struggling with depression for the better part of my life. I've been through times where I couldn't walk or speak properly because of it. I've been on the verge of suicide. I've been to 5 different therapists and took many doses of antidepressants, none of it worked. I couldn't bring myself to shower or change or brush my teeth. It's been pretty bad, I could go on.

Recently I've gotten so much better, and I'm grateful. So I want to share with you this idea that I just had, and I hope it makes you guys see things in a different light. It's my interpretation of mental health. 

Now, I've come from a family of overweight people. We weren't exactly born with the best shape or the best confidence in the world. And up until years ago, around when I was in 10th grade, I couldn't even bring myself to exercise or do anything about it. Until one day, I decided I want to be better than my family. I prepared myself and I registered at the local gym, and that day I exercised like hell. And I did the same for the rest of the week and it was exhausting. I'd never worked out before. But when I looked at myself in the mirror a week after, I saw virtually no progress whatsoever. It was annoying, but I knew I couldn't expect any results after a week!

I think the same thing went for my mental health. I've tried so many things. SO many things. And none of them seemed to make a difference. I would gather all my energy to try to get a healthier lifestyle, and I would still feel like I just wanted to die. I've tried all kinds of coping. The healthy ones and the bad ones. Nothing seemed to cut it. I've tried giving myself positive feedback. Starting with small steps. Smoking. Drinking. Quitting. Going to therapy. Going to parties. Meeting new people. Hanging out with my friends. Medication. Meditation. Prayers. Reaching out. Keeping myself busy. Getting a hobby. Doing charity work. Taking a break. Treating myself even when I felt like I didn't deserve it. Listening to music. Crying. Not crying. Faking it. Not faking it. Talking about it. Not talking about it. Reading books about depression. ""Steering into the skid."" Working in uni. Taking a minor in something I love. Dropping it. The list goes on.

Throughout all these years, everytime I had a little energy I put it into making myself better, and it broke my heart every time. But now, I'm starting to notice the growth in myself and the every day choices I make. I still deal with pain, sure, but no one's ever happy all the time, are they? 

When you're trying to lose weight, you might start to notice some differences in yourself. But then you relapse. And you go back. Maybe even worse than when you started. Then you try again. And again. And again. 

This isn't the most well-written piece of literature in the world, I wrote it off the top of my head but I hope it speaks something to you. Also I'm fit now bitches peace out✌️",1.3986850980740222,4.035708062394605,2.8149150173071824,88.77839808733472,87.26306913996626,5.481929528712167,20.61882044909914,7.005888975835272,0.7138833052276565,2383,76,457,35,76,772,272,593,0.10300000000000001,0.7140000000000001,0.182,0.9916,3,0,3,0,0,1,94.0,1,9,2,15,32,36,4,1,33,0,28,18,3,5,8,94,74,43,2,14,17,0,4,4,1,3,11,3,2,2,29,33,4,1,10,6,0,14,15,16,0,4,21,12,63,20,76,44,16,90,1,5,3,1,29,33,2,12,45,313,92,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05472287872012355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049368127517221055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04198078627507554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050801276558200034,0.05495575840457145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04746912579494282,0.10308951604707696,0.03763206941627742,0.0,0.05253052314806375,0.0,0.12957065765710252,0.21839248046222687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530568529124617,0.05317780382136491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04928904652875573,0.0,0.1356223444503951,0.11943868641736095,0.06364436003141677,0.10634166587682743,0.0,0.06406945765710191,0.2579927927359391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060475168405045375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232286115256645,0.05584133786780834,0.10402599838669063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639339251791968,0.0,0.0312142302067752,0.04410230848599001,0.0592736848665159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0476950232444755,0.0,0.06450624155597957,0.05922024231927525,0.14033791288060354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222514192124823,0.0,0.06571628545870055,0.0,0.0,0.06335621411500818,0.13123930149009333,0.0,0.073154301908334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226302664080822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393788471574428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487142664780253,0.0,0.06428577099268884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04360408179081732,0.12063916129000625,0.06187302188172417,0.0,0.0,0.05184045537485657,0.13812762727492447,0.0,0.0,0.05571674712340111,0.0,0.16482992799995486,0.18776374370705126,0.06201943481979839,0.0,0.0,0.0621898426306611,0.18663805241966847,0.06548931521309137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04538110602782913,0.0,0.047612555447975685,0.05962244182743679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05923480207512845,0.14056762731260394,0.0,0.0,0.16732842804239273,0.0,0.06568862338722263,0.0,0.0,0.06685118840179194,0.0,0.0855962462323906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280499754664161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205905482611195,0.0,0.06566100310136708,0.061750043195355375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06095422299628519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049193477168091033,0.112399423430976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09505067810848368,0.0,0.0,0.17478069545918928,0.0,0.09860064578811772,0.0,0.0,0.06453708786704553,0.0,0.06752625125555811,0.0,0.0581829398000593,0.0,0.09283157364820828,0.09923783617288946,0.0,0.0,0.07059745129057703,0.07167716267579746,0.16405154478315392,0.03955622984455067,0.0,0.0,0.10799161623867176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858800917942183,0.2933901861014239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564768712767634,0.0,0.14855627839966132,0.15034914749234174,0.05550568408828385,0.05722742213613478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17977041911423672,0.0,0.06291154471238106,0.08770718317200075,0.0,0.0,0.07950849039955794
mentalhealth,Nyteblk,2020/01/01,"Sooo I need your help I’m going to lead with who I am... I’m an ana survivor, assault and domestic abuse survivor, I have ehlers danlos syndrome, Adhd, depression, aspbergers, suspect bi polar and schizophrenia but am not diagnosed

I am a writer and starting my second series I want to do a series of articles on mental health, the good bad and ugly what is represented wrong in the media, what it’s like for certain conditions, most common misdiagnosis for each one. I’m going to be researching for the next year but I am hoping to humanize it so if you are down to share your story drop a reply or send me a message plz? I can speak on what I have but just what I find online won’t help with others.",5.030567545963232,5.675973575539572,6.477937649880098,76.12723421262992,68.64028776978418,9.055475619504397,29.11350919264589,9.150863307647796,2.4727067945643486,553,19,102,10,9,189,95,139,0.161,0.6579999999999999,0.18100000000000002,0.0258,0,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,0,3,0,1,3,9,1,0,8,0,12,3,0,1,1,22,21,10,0,4,7,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,8,7,0,0,2,0,0,4,2,4,0,2,0,1,14,5,15,19,2,13,0,1,0,1,11,4,0,4,5,74,22,2,0.0,0.2799309526440741,0.0,0.0,0.2839401151738048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19726827871877575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20349147214959432,0.2398001998753923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21593850621580296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685454309466335,0.19816473078509325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25113466526879913,0.0,0.0,0.3167218771956143,0.0,0.0,0.2346607346774251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154253148442784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23809577511541466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17518472642347294,0.0,0.0,0.2512665242957818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16009674041717106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16722693183834395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935300911649867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583145926868605,0.0,0.15214450165317106
mentalhealth,Whowantstobea,2020/01/01,"Feel really guilty about not getting help. I have anxiety, but, personally feel like I also have some other kind of undiagnosed thing.

I need to get a letter from the doctor saying my condition has worsened. The last time I was there (weeks ago) I got a number to make an appointment with someone. I haven't phoned yet, she'll probably ask when I go to get the letter.

I've just been really tired, and drained and I get it's a phone call to make an appointment that's why I feel really bad about having not done it yet, it's ridiculous. I just so don't feel up to it rn.",3.064615384615383,4.387297512820513,4.709059829059829,84.45538461538466,73.87179487179488,8.618803418803418,23.256410256410252,9.150863307647796,1.6275743589743592,447,12,95,10,9,151,75,117,0.21600000000000005,0.7440000000000001,0.04,-0.9664,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,10,4,1,0,8,0,10,2,0,2,0,16,24,6,0,1,5,0,4,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,7,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,4,5,12,2,11,19,1,9,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,1,8,61,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568295453843091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14148343756910636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13534386817751767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539699265128996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14772141299655495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18065583821914907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810858558747945,0.0,0.1810513243035612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35782573193098793,0.12639219924139172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36973510072139215,0.0,0.10054812352714504,0.0,0.14149966350434987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858623071618155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842357068060405,0.0,0.1442140018316476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643452822273832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361919116698011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311844737064016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448035041511626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19075046183408376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3400198347349088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069445931703298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499043537328328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753826639640262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316389583381323,0.2033443440008986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419151316006836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964343346597032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gogoisik,2020/01/01,"time is passing so fast and i don’t know what to do i graduated from university 2 years ago, i still meet with my close friends from high school or university, but while talking with them i realize constantly that days are passing so fast. i started university 7 years ago even though i remember the first day easily yet its been 7 years. Also listening to songs or watching something that i liked from the past and seeing those are also from years ago makes me cry so hard and that nostalgia feeling gives me nothing but the sadness and i don’t know how can i get out from it.",9.126814159292037,6.929769115044253,8.783292035398231,72.34378761061949,61.38938053097346,12.57982300884956,39.4141592920354,11.20814326018867,4.163543008849558,462,19,91,10,5,149,71,113,0.057999999999999996,0.82,0.122,0.7399,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,1,10,3,0,0,3,0,8,0,0,2,0,19,17,16,0,0,4,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,7,8,0,0,5,1,0,2,2,1,0,1,1,6,13,2,10,16,0,24,0,1,2,0,6,3,0,2,20,61,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.444598064255952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673954592478467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18066751782946788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18364479727296126,0.21564090039934566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11042407074953156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845337249047692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14220741765251627,0.0,0.0,0.1291666636520139,0.0,0.08734722660484158,0.16037902071744142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497648604991874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664005962322474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18376093259750306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167811288053108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159724024362393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041845114349454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595969348508928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18938793706779591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16920007664229073,0.1332247452039944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12870712847966204,0.0,0.0,0.11833435528232565,0.0,0.1335141025626857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437691539422827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16425834672997414,0.0,0.0974868782461042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4306464590352676
mentalhealth,Then_Result,2020/01/01,"How do I confront my sister about this? I'm a (m26). Shes 28. She got a 4 month old ridgeback puppy about a month, and a half ago. A little over a week ago, we were at my birthday dinner, and she mentioned the puppy pooped behind the couch. She said she wasnt there, but her bf said that he put the puppies face in it. Nether of us are not sure weather, or not he rubbed the puppies face or just showed it to her. I talked to my sister later on, and told her that rubbing a puppies nose in its accident is cruel. She agreed, and said that her, and her bf said that they wont do that. But she also said they shell give the puppy a light slap sometimes. Last night she brought her puppy over, and the dog likes to nip sometimes. And ask I was walking to another room I heard a faint slap sound. I asked my mom this morning, and she said that my sister gave her a tap on her nose, because it was nipping at her. I dont know if that's the only instance when she slaps the dog or not. I'm not sure if this is considered abuse or not but I dont want to be a coward, and not talk to her about it at least. I'm afraid if I talk to her about it than she will get annoyed, and brush it off as me worrying too much. We have a great relationship, and I dont want to ruin it over this. If she refuses to stop, than what am I suppose to do? Report her to the authorities? I'm at the point where I dont want to live anymore. My brother is even worse with dogs, than she is. He was thinking about getting a puppy, but changed his mind. I'd be terrified if he got a dog.",2.2372321428571422,2.8927915922619043,3.706904761904763,93.42142857142859,75.04166666666667,6.552380952380951,23.523809523809533,6.42735559955562,0.35889523809523816,1189,32,288,8,24,394,154,336,0.13,0.8009999999999999,0.069,-0.9782,1,0,0,0,1,1,42.0,3,0,2,0,13,9,3,1,24,0,24,7,5,1,2,45,50,28,0,8,20,5,2,1,2,2,1,8,2,0,20,14,1,2,2,1,0,3,12,5,0,1,17,14,49,4,36,29,2,30,0,1,0,0,60,16,0,9,12,193,69,1,0.0,0.11311877886906907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692604406867683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634897153512307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011077880838544,0.0,0.0,0.09468262897347446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17850697581136046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058198881366705535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099677986862654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4475701710509305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305839491936918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976042130982743,0.0915854990359972,0.0,0.0,0.15271545513369786,0.10525828270825373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05246894712280874,0.07782247102550516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04664282581985135,0.09568808508671826,0.08430357771859304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639956412834806,0.11181572227475667,0.15240977416462634,0.0,0.07018294893081581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959406044014315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018186637666543,0.0,0.0,0.07261080342934005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902519555787399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597578941519826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250126254401266,0.0,0.0,0.5448947491256894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888486162334544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981891674600895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17996257253528336,0.0,0.0,0.2302104751652217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061174640771718414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122764427253408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484113248317168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16893568296855804,0.0,0.07658192739126471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695651080481686,0.09729418509544838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Glass-Depth,2020/01/01,"My brother is incestuous toward me My brother is 7 years younger, and he's been inappropriate toward me since he was 9 and I was 16. One time our mom made us take a shower together because he has a broken ankle, and he kept groping me when I asked him to stop. He flashed me all the time after that and deliberately had me catch him masturbating. One time he followed me around and kept touching himself when he knew I didn't want to see. The one time I told our mom about his behavior, he lied and spun it into me trying to take his pants off. I knew from that point on that I would be the one in trouble because I was older if I ever pressed it too hard.

He got morbidly obese and started being vocally anti-gay, yet he still creeps on me. He only wants to talk to me when he walk in the bathroom while I'm undressed. He stares at me in bed when I visit. He asked three neighbor girls, at one is underage, if they thought I was hot just showing my photo.",4.638079526226734,4.692603802030458,5.787119289340103,82.81167724196278,69.35532994923858,8.394077834179358,30.12225042301184,8.07648339933343,1.8922524534686973,747,27,159,9,12,250,115,197,0.071,0.929,0.0,-0.8813,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,3,0,1,0,11,1,0,0,6,0,14,1,0,1,2,24,32,14,0,5,3,4,4,0,1,1,1,0,3,1,5,9,1,3,3,1,0,4,1,1,0,6,15,6,32,0,20,14,1,34,0,0,2,0,34,13,0,2,17,103,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133246006676169,0.27985924168784565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18248580742949927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353931870717529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971193639204247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408294670044388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162984943692286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506043738891311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5071316793572551,0.11383759258548305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14149499611602198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927475077148905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238159810521302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594353708383784,0.0,0.11953380945303467,0.1251383113256559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22507989774297232,0.12030627694987325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118828373594739,0.34911601710298323,0.0,0.0,0.1430246590142227,0.0,0.10162218750632812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18004535736058586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17656905531639958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632763748295618,0.0,0.0,0.09638834173299617
mentalhealth,SethMcM29,2020/01/01,"How do I help a friend? He sent me this, “Thinking that I’m worthless and don’t deserve to be happy bc every year or so a death happens or something like this. First it was my great grandpa in the 4th grade and then my uncle followed by my grandpa in the 7th. Then my dad on the summer before my freshman year and then this.”",4.593970588235294,4.335272220588237,5.2694117647058825,87.56235294117648,69.44117647058823,6.8000000000000025,30.235294117647058,3.1291,1.0872529411764704,253,9,54,0,4,82,49,68,0.099,0.6990000000000001,0.20199999999999999,0.8079,1,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,5,0,4,0,0,1,0,7,9,10,1,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,2,0,7,4,5,6,0,12,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,2,8,37,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28000930143539304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27725068582769496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27990174441330706,0.0,0.0,0.2542340974405977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36279431776298654,0.0,0.0,0.290990285501337,0.3502948396754711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22056472123234086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16076409130436894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533296108921193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21085098000968105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42381296664820056
mentalhealth,chemrec,2020/01/01,"Does anyone ever feel like their perception of reality is very fragile? I don’t know how to explain this and maybe it’s coming from a place of anxiety, but a lot of the times I feel like I’m only perceiving reality in a way that won’t absolutely shatter me and if I were to discover new info that would completely change how I see the world, I wouldn’t be able to handle it? I know it doesn’t make much sense but a lot of the times I feel like my mind is cushioning me from the harsh reality of things even though everything is still so shitty?",4.689481668773702,4.897112132743364,6.2650063211125175,78.89778761061949,69.26548672566372,10.350948166877373,28.532237673830593,10.290406445055957,2.6523158027812896,433,14,92,11,7,149,70,113,0.11,0.815,0.075,-0.7109,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,0,8,0,10,0,0,3,1,24,20,9,0,3,3,0,4,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,9,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,5,11,3,11,15,3,10,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,3,8,62,18,0,0.17547444067881168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423746682462587,0.0,0.0,0.12269580890659065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856286911576734,0.15115569307596993,0.1839816125107914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535588655394166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158992131294905,0.15872667769530555,0.0,0.0,0.15770511262486425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661754488726578,0.3760769264471825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19287232708799848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571838444779145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983641888794899,0.0,0.0,0.11713055173446946,0.0,0.1762876610297358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17717916294551264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289939042468438,0.0,0.0,0.16947430825804627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345621931736934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18333344267847676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13983041046859174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013411499567455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657742126386238,0.0,0.1724027470345344,0.0,0.2046411149757735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478479073010248,0.0,0.13928344334793522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12465200805057,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vinkybean,2020/01/01,"I’m losing my mind Stats 17 dropped out at 15 ex criminal 70 pounds obese albino. Over the holidays I went to the gatherings went to an nfl game and I was fucking miserable. All my cousins around the same age brought their girlfriends or boyfriends, had social lives to talk about. Here I am turning 18 this summer never asked a girl out had a brief 2 month online relationship with a girl i met in the mental hospital when I was 14 so never had a real life relationship. I have had one legit friendship in my life but my mom made me move so much that was short lived. I have no dad as he killed himself when I was one year old. All I ever wanted was for people to like me. Inside somewhere I think im nice, like I want to be able to be there for people and genuinely be allowed to care for somebody you know. Idgaf about sex at this point I just fanticise about having someone to go to events with or go to a movie, or even just having a fucking friend. Not the people who beat the shit out of me after I thought we were friends all those years ago. All I have is my financial ambitions I save money like crazy and am in our local real estate investors meetup and I work my ass off. The only thing I have to live for is the goal of getting fucking rich. I've had lows before but fuck man im starting to have mental breakdowns at work and I almost quit every day and come close to crying at least a few times a shift. I hate myself and have no logical reason not to I have not self esteem and it's like im watching the lives of others through a glass box, a ghost merely observing human life but having no involvement no life of their own. Besides money I really have nothing to live for. I was always told I was smart. I was very mature for my age. I waited my whole childhood to be an adult so I could make my own decisions and live life and now its almost here and I have nothing and nobody. What the fuck can I do man I cant live like this too much longer.",3.011887694145756,4.292442567901237,4.1604699322978895,88.50340501792118,73.93827160493828,6.9048187972919175,23.434886499402623,7.359569317364363,0.8344982078853045,1540,42,326,17,31,503,218,405,0.125,0.736,0.139,0.7765,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,2,1,2,6,18,23,8,1,22,0,38,14,2,4,7,59,66,24,2,3,11,4,0,5,3,0,6,0,0,7,11,21,1,1,6,2,3,8,10,11,0,2,21,1,48,12,47,40,12,47,0,3,1,7,32,18,7,5,25,221,59,3,0.07680601576387101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808389876486215,0.0,0.15382026036305227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06390875791717965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683736378508016,0.07180325668921904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06535626238469103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830885192388279,0.0,0.0,0.06616158171116282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06132335382506735,0.0,0.08436780178395845,0.049533526164547016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05072964903725018,0.06947543848580894,0.06471238089735831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868027450721386,0.3550296196902461,0.040127973185226665,0.0,0.08730125750787153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583003936826478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24889103101037516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497447668475687,0.0,0.042210577612982365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712518017888069,0.1876176984025841,0.0,0.4747478334965661,0.0,0.0,0.08592628542180737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267570920754396,0.05126861193087059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480479784456114,0.0,0.07755218098760816,0.08995427738206993,0.061305829010588786,0.0816326396370941,0.11292251799977013,0.0,0.11847506859555228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147394887190269,0.0,0.08059499338166427,0.0,0.104091488073821,0.05841443600004705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974286165418505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260651079510176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169265200423073,0.0,0.17484412183212655,0.04920390042877055,0.07896937622912098,0.0,0.1649218341628166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012542521133728,0.0,0.07884027144950939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829406066162596,0.06507748791178602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054363693276061525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06173376611083122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051026504034811335,0.04921419361049883,0.0,0.06097539720129973,0.04478620544953043,0.0,0.0,0.07339143951187424,0.0,0.0,0.08354288974845507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337300678188049,0.09060435614556284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423998921993055,0.0,0.08575117369940974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118313884626618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892111193558012
mentalhealth,Ilikegammon,2020/01/01,"I don't have goals in life? I just want a simple-stress free life? This is a post I've been meaning to write for a while. Being New Year it seems even more relevant, eg: - People are setting their New Year's Resolutions - People are posting on social media saying what they've achieved over the past decade and what they hope to achieve over this next decade. Anyway,... a little about me: I'm a 25 year old guy. I'm not the sort of person to sit at home playing computer games or anything like that. I'm active (love the gym), enjoy socialising with friends at bars or night outs etc etc. However there's very little else I want out of life right now.

I'm in a job that I don't find fulfilling or challenging and it's pretty montonenous but it's an easy pace of life... I wake up at 8am in the week (a nice lie-in compared to most jobs), then do very little in my office job, find it easy and stress-free despite it being boring. All of this I don't mind though as I don't like stress. I then go to the gym for 2 hours after work and lift weights. I then go home and sleep for day 2. When the weekend comes I usually do the same sort of thing... see friends, go for dinner, get very drunk somewhere and usually spend Sunday hungover and sleeping. I have friends that have goals like becoming a millionaire or having £1m in assets (property) or generally very career driven but I don't want the long days and stress that comes with this.

I'm happy with a simple life without the stress and increases leisure/home time to do things I enjoy. I wake up and it's light outside and get home before it's dark. I do feel guilty sometimes because naturally I can push myself very hard (eg at the gym I work very hard) and sometimes I do feel guilty that I should want or expect more out of life.

I don't know if it's laziness being how I am. I've seen posts like this before on Reddit but the difference is, usually the person who writes it says things like ""I don't know what I want out of life - I don't have a job, play computer games and watch porn through the day, don't leave my messy bedroom and don't socialise with friends apart from gamer friends"". That's not my personality at all however I guess the similar theme is I don't want much other than stress-limitation.

I guess the only goal I have for this year is to find a girlfriend. However even then I'm not going to actively force this. If it happens it happens but I'm not going to chase anything especially if it leads to stress. Also if I feel the relationship is going to lead to stress then I quickly cut it off.

Is it weird to want so little from life and be happy with a minimalistic, simple life?",4.0105450201582835,4.7821051657458575,4.888946294360661,86.15023891294611,71.00736648250461,7.932885371559405,26.09372355781197,8.098718942377014,1.3656053854959929,2087,62,447,28,37,679,231,543,0.042,0.772,0.187,0.9969,7,0,0,0,0,0,65.0,0,0,2,11,14,29,1,5,29,0,38,19,4,3,2,81,78,41,0,14,20,0,6,5,6,1,9,2,4,4,35,26,4,0,10,10,2,13,16,8,0,0,3,12,37,22,59,70,10,77,0,0,3,2,22,27,0,17,37,258,72,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04169313923080047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580696911806471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03178162082750028,0.05758011431781147,0.08872778959319515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982109268531414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008702179479231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05447102193784017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04355293687107928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162908398982781,0.06887067071583501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908458218550192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14295407454549128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014007158823793,0.0,0.05447781485151402,0.0,0.1777805368164887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486736060778666,0.051622835407429415,0.0922073827307614,0.11099947991362913,0.09340722835366264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688997246544473,0.05178281037172025,0.05134345660732717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20694773550925274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05730516269438955,0.0,0.0,0.055204494655733335,0.0,0.0,0.3314267787959813,0.1273550770838096,0.20901586879471756,0.0,0.046138718121971074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0470547742466621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05679138664886719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052642496266537504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03832595780356435,0.0,0.0,0.10070654462332958,0.05544722596328522,0.04892610288096947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05470796029416385,0.0,0.0,0.03965177626062804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04976970995890873,0.07228907376639,0.13656942895102506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14979562476486988,0.053041053788981316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055974551125608216,0.0,0.0445238579238314,0.0,0.0829212773183017,0.0,0.0,0.04154564080035167,0.04746265501901671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434730115580317,0.05314608491449497,0.0,0.0,0.10312767142571476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4777728818236064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391052246136948,0.0,0.051223353899111215,0.0,0.0304009200404823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17226131016312227,0.25810595372791384,0.215258139330786,0.0,0.04182035326852036,0.06348760075459328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0502572421567964,0.0,0.07591125581069162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13429549496699775
mentalhealth,basketghostdaddy,2020/01/01,"My ex screwed me up so hard that I seek revenge everywhere My ex has been an abusive narcissist. He verbally and emotionally abused me on a daily basis, gaslighted me, blamed me for literally everything (like the high school I used to go to or him not getting a job), lied to me, constantly fought with me. I resorted to self harm, had 2 ""serious"" suicide attempts, many more where not much happened, cried literally every day. Now I ditched him for good, and up till now I thought I was indifferent to him. 
Truth is, I hate him beyond understanding. I resent everything he's ever done. I'm so hurt that I feel like I'll never heal again. I told him everything the worst, worded it so horribly, intended to hurt him so he can feel at least 1% of what I did.
My mind has gone destructive in a different manner. I observed that I enjoy hurting men. I feel good seducing them and making them fall for me, feeding them with false hope, often risking a whole lot when they mingle with me. I seek out the vengeance everywhere. 
I recently met a kind guy in therapy and we fell in love. He's really sweet, sensitive, understanding, has also had a share of shitty exes. I'm horribly scared I'll want to hurt him too. 
What do I do with this mess? I feel guilty even thinking about it. It's madness. It's taking over me.",3.2608663101604307,5.235146639215689,4.8026114081996445,81.27493315508023,74.76470588235293,8.714795008912658,28.061497326203213,9.339509955726095,2.6202941176470587,1023,42,199,26,22,343,153,255,0.284,0.6,0.11599999999999999,-0.9949,3,0,0,0,1,1,40.0,1,0,4,1,16,27,6,2,10,0,13,5,0,3,3,33,37,12,1,2,3,2,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,10,10,1,0,8,0,0,4,3,16,0,0,11,6,42,11,28,26,6,26,0,4,0,3,26,12,1,4,12,131,52,2,0.0,0.268207309893726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905126119346188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12231089470619826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432649616515985,0.0729938391249437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182524166158159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582577111849406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12731593317484122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475647561187021,0.10238073831290778,0.095361777898112,0.0,0.3051654473090141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289154276356265,0.08085814338453078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059133581755561576,0.0,0.06432465482838831,0.18986549667932692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120692218048569,0.10008758280847783,0.0,0.10138996928321573,0.11174503660607472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195843281240283,0.0,0.11241651519962756,0.0,0.0,0.4846600819211832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231692084401423,0.0,0.0,0.11786294792625655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059124721867593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622435997259422,0.10215231089898076,0.0,0.07555070476932113,0.11475006057716895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428282743273895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083202718953192,0.0,0.08729390745020359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250809442248134,0.0,0.11175481447852044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331618799472662,0.11454750143858135,0.0,0.0,0.11807482427689885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380411578628052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509972550578555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943492154949862,0.0,0.0,0.07252326271170552,0.0,0.08985486555319852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815145505857557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23565553005537584,0.0,0.09775399634241623,0.0,0.0,0.06675841908103332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636506750996934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lil_DevilBoi,2020/01/01,I know I need help but I'm scared I know I need professional help but what I'm scared about is getting put into a mental hospital and eventually the government will hear about me and what goes on in my head and will take me back and I don't know experiment on me and I won't be able to ever go back to the real world and I'll lose everyone I care about. I don't know what to do because I keep getting worse and worse which also makes the fear worse and worse,1.9644000000000013,3.2348712400000004,3.799000000000003,90.08950000000002,76.6,7.4,21.5,8.07648339933343,0.7311000000000005,364,9,86,6,8,123,53,100,0.28,0.636,0.084,-0.9762,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,3,4,0,8,1,1,1,1,21,24,11,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,4,9,0,1,4,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,0,1,13,1,10,20,0,10,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,53,17,2,0.142948326806714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431572530152118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198368792814807,0.0,0.08713997322297272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574534618601326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12930494554283112,0.0,0.13659325217977986,0.0,0.1398308932503178,0.0,0.1608566096580512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14936920156379507,0.0,0.08124082836973955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670622389697072,0.0,0.1611131534791078,0.0,0.1916305004742676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705904094467976,0.0,0.0,0.3142426479650353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15992261293081347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541911815543076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14405829161588266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119887460710127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14370255103354174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270649127752687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28623242534151616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747935161987553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5827062297330371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-seeker_,2020/01/01,"Attachment style and the consequences. Need advice and help 
Hi, I am a male(25) who has been going to the psychologists after having full blown anxiety a year ago. The psychologists wrote that I might have an anxious preoccupied attachtment style(onveilig (ambivalent) gehecht in Dutch). 

A short flashback to a year ago:

I used to live at my cousin’s house. My sleep was horrible, because I did not feel at home there. That’s also when I started taking meds to treat anxiety. Now I live at my grandparent’s and here I feel more rested. However, I always isolate myself in my room. And I also can not go back to my mother’s house, because she lives abroad now. 

I just had a conversation with her about my struggle to find a job (while I’m also studying) so that I can find a place for myself. It feels as if I’m stuck here due to my anxiety and that most of the interaction’s with others is negatively influenced because of Anxiety.

Are there people who have experienced the same struggle as mentioned above. 

How did you overcome such struggles?",4.783903846153844,6.8890390923076925,5.441073717948719,77.76007211538463,70.8974358974359,8.772435897435898,30.136217948717945,9.354420925462401,2.9110064102564106,833,35,147,19,16,269,119,195,0.124,0.835,0.040999999999999995,-0.8909999999999999,3,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,0,0,16,4,0,3,13,0,15,1,1,3,0,24,28,15,0,2,4,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,8,7,0,0,5,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,7,4,23,1,21,20,5,23,0,0,0,0,13,9,0,3,12,110,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062314023937692,0.2188424114446083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961423172644779,0.1027111178175022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3777219198541725,0.1394509091310287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491695430774746,0.0,0.225741764998208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18724336793686852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256419784024015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030643119566366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273854467428793,0.0,0.12381935908841775,0.0,0.0,0.2848640137321409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249413827833462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32699663606843765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711287673997574,0.0,0.0,0.1309492482877976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915284377686944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557704462107532,0.0,0.12896745889964412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235281237100417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737074365156937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3871356624530916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281074895234326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10661164368864462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15898130888133644
mentalhealth,anon-cunt,2020/01/01,"Lacking empathy. I'm not sure if it's normal to search for guilt, or remorse or empathy but I've been looking for those feeling for seemingly forever. The more things I do that should cause guilt, the more I realize that I should probably stop now. Abandoning a family, a marriage, a life didn't give me any feeling other than temporary excitement. I keep reading about aspd but surely I am not a sociopath. Do sociopaths spend years wondering why they don't understand other people? Maybe. I'm not sure. Maybe someone diagnosed could answer a question or two. I don't want to see another therapist, I'll lie to them again to hide myself I know it. Why do people feel empathy? Why guilt, remorse? Why don't I?",2.500972222222224,5.300820703703707,4.13321759259259,80.45760416666667,82.7037037037037,8.11574074074074,28.4375,8.841846274778883,3.0493055555555566,565,27,98,16,16,188,83,135,0.187,0.727,0.086,-0.871,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,0,3,8,0,3,7,0,12,2,0,1,3,32,26,6,0,7,9,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,8,0,0,3,10,1,1,0,7,4,0,1,2,5,12,4,9,21,3,4,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,7,4,63,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550754816642912,0.14726903182168632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14427590191233755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213405948562198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425489158238533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13239922984433553,0.0,0.21303993036844746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472782783713136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248341417234747,0.0,0.0,0.07718500580510983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992005941623328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793859115076386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821921494987982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13760647103471113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19473402799888034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142367352056893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733075996173568,0.0,0.14048320072225398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111916636323104,0.12785603009996846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899875733300283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741847111927488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3971038004629615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630676953460511,0.0933055464498085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719454730527195,0.1462084002884784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828382143829351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5069197718615289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15230682218202246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09044210042564506
mentalhealth,vegetablewizard,2020/01/01,"Mixed Thoughts on Drinking (Pun intended) So being new year's I got so fucked up I blacked out for part of the night and today I've felt the most depressed since before I started medication.

The problem is that I like drinking too much even though it worsens my depression. People find me hilarious and the life of the party when I get drunk but secretly I just do it to feel different and help me tolerate social interaction. What they don't see is me drinking alone every time there's alcohol in my apartment.

I don't know if I have the resolve to quit but I'm considering trying it. I know I won't lose the part of me that people like, but it's a difficult act to maintain in larger social gatherings. I isolate because I need time alone to be myself but it also leads to more temptation to indulge my vices and alienate myself.",4.004887429643529,5.731794329268298,5.303170731707322,79.5108724202627,72.17073170731706,8.21688555347092,30.29831144465291,8.841846274778883,2.6091093808630395,666,29,123,13,13,222,103,164,0.142,0.748,0.11,-0.5373,1,2,4,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,4,9,9,1,0,8,0,9,8,0,2,0,24,21,14,0,3,6,0,2,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,8,5,5,0,8,4,0,2,3,6,0,0,3,4,22,3,15,15,5,16,0,3,2,1,7,6,1,2,10,85,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147581413116355,0.0,0.2860492653534075,0.0,0.11043441346977573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418134781779579,0.0,0.11750855875773847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378818093598896,0.0,0.0,0.14427974169814445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.405841182651748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121035578144536,0.0,0.11635087955720665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982491291761705,0.0,0.1325927263524957,0.0,0.1262162046066592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766647725522634,0.07214886719057062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044707856805436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256207694512923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15178665237732644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754048694225413,0.1349323509778668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15449283038694367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391160479460961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151561500980176,0.10239559243838338,0.0,0.13337288092508634,0.0,0.12959267579041522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990865626140701,0.0,0.19147518294249968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213813547261927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468808871231171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004372802476386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423349917639768,0.0,0.0,0.28154064788728383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774425605944856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13567750349736593,0.10963189728676592,0.1610484523617751,0.0,0.13089778479977382,0.0,0.0,0.09375734839850984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892856529832519
mentalhealth,pony-boi,2020/01/01,"I dont know who I am I have no values, i have no desire to do anything. Ive lost my ambition. I am lonely. I want to do something but I feel stuck. I workout and thats the only thing keeping my last serotonin molecule from leaving me.

I dont have interests. I have a lot of random hobbies I swap between to keep me mentally stimulated but im not passionate about them anymore. Playing piano isnt fun anymore, its like theres a hole in my chest.",-0.07631205673758856,2.1900554468085147,3.030957446808511,87.28416666666668,90.27659574468086,5.686524822695036,25.91843971631205,7.1686216300943375,1.5455843971631202,348,17,71,6,12,124,63,94,0.20199999999999999,0.659,0.139,-0.6982,0,2,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,2,7,0,0,3,0,12,2,1,1,0,13,19,3,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,6,2,0,0,2,1,18,5,8,17,1,2,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,2,2,52,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4237927248858916,0.0,0.0,0.17582650961984514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5008230771149607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803447313848524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307927912396389,0.0,0.0,0.37982712557592935,0.0,0.0,0.11742364103186408,0.17416392748500764,0.0,0.22623835127633066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438498838108183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332384915906324,0.1816487100078577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153221306135273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250040041713826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16448827766825566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14194825637855826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602402044230215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1crazymomma3,2020/01/01,"Thoughts to ponder upon Nothing gives anyone the right to abuse another person. Stop giving excuses and justifying your actions because of your negative life experiences. Yes, being abuses leaves a mark in your brain and soul but this is not a free pass to go causing havoc in the lives of others regardless if they did you wrong or not. Kindness, compassion, respect and love must be what guides you through life. Break they cycles of hate! #wishforchange #reachout #kindnessisalwaystheanswer",7.731269841269842,10.82375330864198,6.404338624338624,69.75666666666667,65.2962962962963,9.073015873015876,33.79365079365079,9.606745405546679,3.871594708994708,402,18,55,9,7,120,66,81,0.332,0.584,0.084,-0.9812,0,0,0,0,2,0,11.0,0,5,2,0,0,6,1,0,4,1,5,4,1,1,1,14,11,6,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,2,0,1,3,3,2,0,0,2,0,7,5,10,6,0,9,1,0,0,1,12,4,0,2,1,38,10,0,0.0,0.4599359454821983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035229966435939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571404699364092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831703716667913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21667151303118254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19938654812513132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18985978973638465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723825832697215,0.110307287851452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916262427177049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20211755754629412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20551602076563671,0.0,0.0,0.2741866629121131,0.0,0.0,0.17138730683440664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17517613414463185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18623706820790448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16947415707895355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16575400547915475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622700903774467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540878306439959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21220977047568945,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,juliaeay,2020/01/01,"How do I stay connected to reality Ok so this caption is kinda weird but anyway... that’s basically what it is. Due to the fact that I’m an extremely sensitive person and I’m my head 90% of the time.. I often get really really disconnected from this world and reality. I walk around feeling like a ghost or things just don’t seem real and I barely notice my surroundings. I get lost in this fog and it makes me so anxious all the time...

I have already come far and I’ve already conquered a lot of demons but for some reason I can’t imagine this ever really going away because I simply can’t stop myself from thinking. Can anybody of you maybe relate and give me some advice? 

I just want to live my life and not feel like I’m only living it half alive... It scares me so much.",1.6618670886075932,3.8664920696202536,3.9447943037974684,84.36883702531647,80.83544303797468,6.734810126582277,21.26740506329114,7.865858978985527,1.096606329113924,609,18,121,11,16,210,102,158,0.105,0.8220000000000001,0.073,-0.7293,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,2,10,6,0,1,6,1,8,2,1,3,3,34,23,14,1,1,6,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,12,9,0,1,6,0,0,3,4,3,0,1,1,2,17,3,12,22,5,15,1,1,0,0,3,6,0,7,7,81,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344944450343667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465765111228083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17740099038368493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979140059802686,0.0,0.0,0.1475363404413026,0.0,0.0,0.09572499486543322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13526880335614347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14204405613587556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587997722484845,0.2243667870972352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16408504069839058,0.15063900231567706,0.08924466683800479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16115970673218366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091605033372123,0.1534353979754958,0.0,0.2773235276946968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17141852164491336,0.13350263550368094,0.0,0.0,0.1048198003472048,0.0,0.15775933058611855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11543628104657512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17878149689165038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942959421596205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711392040144166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787363188907643,0.3017953573349198,0.1614546198567073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721600795095134,0.0,0.0,0.14295565454811174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673747726823859,0.0,0.13128543395074987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432480544932007,0.10061949708053217,0.0,0.0,0.18313275654346192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926212956045177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zergpossum,2020/01/01,Worrying Boy do I love it when my worry is relieved and soon after a new worry takes over,0.9205263157894772,3.0568202631578965,3.6413157894736834,85.87671052631579,83.21052631578947,5.905263157894738,20.026315789473685,7.1686216300943375,0.6876105263157894,71,2,14,1,2,25,18,19,0.304,0.444,0.252,-0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,4,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26505486225792113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28363497371896645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22080847534059986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8947294221688675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asimplethrowaway000,2020/01/01,"I'm really struggling over this winter break, and it's made me feel like a worthless person. High school senior here. I previously posted about possible seasonal depression and now I'm completely sure that I have it. The moment winter vacation started, I just crashed. Have only been happy a couple of times for the past two weeks. Every time I try and mention it to my mother, she writes it off as me not trying hard enough. This time specifically I mentioned that I had run out of bedding for my pet rabbit and she flipped out on me because I didn't ask her to pick some up. Called me irresponsible and after the conversation ended she started sending me job links so I can get out of the house. But the truth is, I'm terrified. Everything in the outside world freaks me the hell out. Barring the fact that I'm struggling with gender identity, there are numerous issues. I'm awful at socializing, I stutter when I speak, I worry about every single person I meet, I struggle to be happy when I'm alone, and I'm not really truly good at anything off the top pf my head. I guess the takeaway is, after this encounter with my mom, I kinda just feel like a useless person. How can I overcome this as well as my fear of leaving the comfort zone? Please tell me anything that might help, no matter how stupid. I'm struggling heavily and am overall stuck.",5.21191452991453,6.393923815384612,6.018717948717949,77.63850427350431,68.53846153846153,8.393162393162394,30.213675213675213,8.680891452615391,2.4483803418803416,1072,41,191,17,18,352,155,260,0.20800000000000002,0.684,0.10800000000000001,-0.983,1,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,13,21,2,5,14,1,13,2,1,4,3,34,30,16,0,0,5,2,3,2,0,1,0,1,2,3,12,13,1,0,3,1,0,2,4,12,1,1,5,4,32,9,30,23,3,37,1,3,0,0,21,15,1,4,20,127,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374008435336334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18074450383148,0.0,0.10266659045490144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694506689221151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213818739035976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151438610235648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151340394906268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458754256647572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726765374613487,0.11347310180987302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18505565940293103,0.0,0.09869886084250896,0.0,0.0,0.1235776888071579,0.11105627522453496,0.15691042440618486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05737625810796273,0.0,0.0,0.09211154998441333,0.0,0.0,0.12097877545889915,0.0,0.0,0.23381021528608584,0.09837687612428564,0.0,0.11270669027124836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360982680136846,0.11603053751206675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267171836011388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462322974968513,0.1089791020418222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628320051823728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073047117478806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391405093956857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650134195833478,0.0,0.12861949974809733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352282687438796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483532543822023,0.0,0.28767096575032025,0.0,0.12054904710820792,0.0,0.1238052056401031,0.10517691104631187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070661769476012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114339454914116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194734934920107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546189102108796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4592295593947992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350376307542926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598725411505972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921102422756708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491207285908473,0.0,0.10727788479715228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809073527787141,0.0,0.09874109481156708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115272312635399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bydesign-,2020/01/01,antipsychotic withdrawals suck oh. my bad: Antipsychotic Discontinuation Syndrome™ sucks. i just call them withdrawals. not sure why it needs a fancy name. the part that i don't like is the involuntary muscle spasms. i get little shocks throughout my body. it's uncomfortable. this happens every time.,4.52097777777778,7.802352519999999,4.512666666666668,72.60411111111115,93.8,6.222222222222222,25.555555555555557,7.3871296695380915,2.228488888888889,246,10,36,5,9,76,43,50,0.332,0.6679999999999999,0.0,-0.9421,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,1,6,2,0,3,0,2,1,1,0,1,5,7,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,7,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,2,18,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674461178256096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3557930622502568,0.0,0.0,0.3270731142774108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698756429193887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16734915965450314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.283249760585895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564876651958275,0.32103554531868084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23750638109988215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34686535538537183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018891148174757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18677578883680448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28903065338144635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,historynerd86,2020/01/01,"Please help I don't know what to do my life is spiralling out of control and no one cares I am unemployed, no friends, no one to talk to. I'm in debt. My husband is a raging alcoholic. He makes me feel bad for not having a job (I was working two jobs not too long ago, quit one and lost the other). I live in a very small area and I'm in the process of getting another job. I'm starting to get very depressed because my whole life I've struggled with poverty and depression. I try very, very hard. I have had many jobs in the past and I'm a hard worker. I'm loyal.  But I'm extremely shy and awkward in social situations. I've never had any friends. 

I knew my husband had problems with addiction from the start, but I was so happy for once in my life I thought someone cared about me and didn't want to be alone. I have brought up divorce before and he screams at me saying ""No one will want you, how will you support yourself etc"" 

My depression has been worsening and he pretends like I don't exist, when he gets home he sits in front of tv and drinks all night. What's worse is my 9 year old son tells me I'm worthless and I should kill myself. He says he doesn't have to listen to me, you don't have a job.

I am not a bad mother, I have done nothing to warrant that kind of response. I don't know what to do anymore. I am completely alone in the world. I have tried talking to my husband when he is sober because I am concerned that the fifth of whiskey he drinks everyday is not good for his health and told him he will develop cirrhosis or pancreatitis. He doesn't think its that big of a deal. I wish I could leave but I don't have anyone to go and no one truly cares about me. I am not a bad person, I have always tried to put my family first but they don't even love me.",2.55261904761905,3.520333812169312,3.878703703703703,91.2991666666667,74.63492063492063,6.987301587301588,26.198412698412696,7.310402129719878,1.0460888888888884,1383,48,318,15,28,455,185,378,0.217,0.685,0.098,-0.9903,8,3,4,0,1,1,36.0,0,3,1,6,8,26,2,2,14,0,44,10,0,3,2,43,76,22,1,6,10,5,3,1,2,4,6,4,1,1,8,16,4,1,6,5,1,4,20,14,0,7,13,7,46,12,37,57,3,33,0,5,0,1,37,15,0,1,14,194,54,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640214025185212,0.0,0.0,0.07025680168166723,0.08470193475718699,0.0,0.1641732905227246,0.0,0.0,0.06594841088956932,0.0,0.0,0.053897672139163744,0.08310817464966959,0.0,0.0,0.0786019303683438,0.05541853700057532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985295689967547,0.09662901147332653,0.0,0.06744211257458152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424242550446318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830997561466594,0.0,0.08889378532113297,0.06328049342506227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171078140374888,0.204792552166822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110772083556117,0.0,0.15528393288769982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839282429744884,0.05234868972618365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471671526100472,0.0,0.04007486507607399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741620674661611,0.0,0.0,0.12246796468539504,0.0,0.12422598169789628,0.0,0.04504374196073633,0.06647725092724703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843708544344162,0.1419979205791124,0.0,0.0,0.08424678848482556,0.0,0.0,0.05312448794764391,0.0,0.07950151982334529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3932531323968696,0.0,0.08768644370767925,0.08253426663984205,0.08711546295155614,0.0,0.0,0.08392202173106747,0.0,0.0,0.16794529446577328,0.03872110636367989,0.0,0.06998563535340276,0.07014020378272795,0.0,0.0,0.08651868990984063,0.0,0.07153279477522992,0.0,0.05290485366241241,0.08035444779931775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061128104805562765,0.0,0.0,0.07437759361441287,0.0,0.07604950323117272,0.0,0.08316718885483664,0.08440642261605748,0.2685339399998621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566004737055733,0.0,0.06920440479651584,0.0,0.08700069920665664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583851850580901,0.0,0.07967546315991793,0.0,0.08429987933759177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605714952145947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890885099017381,0.0,0.08079282168833676,0.06715444099272279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219742953822816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285692363841184,0.0,0.0,0.08994022859611148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12740800810160186,0.06927436112739398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05078486842178993,0.0,0.06292143173862312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573373300382946,0.0,0.1614314832613029,0.0,0.07742285161645153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26158224486071224,0.0934960012087205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848792906787682,0.09114196711409353,0.0,0.0,0.05770024795540678,0.0,0.080769945290172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051039093452847815
mentalhealth,constellationcrown,2020/01/01,"I just got diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and I'm freaking out So I grew up in a pretty unstable home situation and as a result developed some shit coping mechanisms. I'd been dealing with a lot of shit-mood swings, fear of change, terrible self esteem, the whole shebang. I've been seeing a therapist. We went through a BPD screening and I definitely have it.

I'm pretty scared. Every time I've heard about BPD it was used as an insult, or it's been a way to warn people off of a manipulative person. I don't wanna be like that. Even though I know the BPD stigma is bullshit, I'm still pretty upset. 

Does anyone have any advice?",3.5110822510822497,5.602238333333332,5.453463203463205,76.36577922077925,74.39682539682539,8.391341991341992,25.740259740259727,9.095868883498916,2.322342857142857,514,18,93,12,11,177,90,126,0.251,0.6579999999999999,0.091,-0.9623,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,0,6,8,2,3,10,0,9,2,1,3,0,16,18,8,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,3,4,7,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,7,0,0,7,3,6,1,15,10,3,9,0,0,2,0,7,4,1,3,3,56,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13222407425392102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201593287122348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094612404916111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5112573633538178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431408052839702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949941580202785,0.0,0.13733753741072285,0.0,0.0,0.15507781340025492,0.0,0.11841132712148834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937145758918409,0.0,0.11400512155360415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15226218402862166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082203474981088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357276895435634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436323567276351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610598533198833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11503633947360115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938074193720446,0.23629621144702675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129789566371384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13546964067860187,0.0,0.1078251289325806,0.0,0.1411585961462534,0.0,0.277789029094041,0.0,0.15209492398019647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805931961885816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710618057412926,0.0,0.0,0.1329421001128022,0.0,0.0789007717749856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686502161562973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740335515598197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254343975162307,0.0,0.15106959202245193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PricelessLife,2020/01/01,I hope by the end of this year nobody says “wow this year kicked my ass” I got a good feeling about 2020. Not just for me for everybody and I hope you can see the opportunities you have coming to you!,0.1521428571428558,2.3763508809523834,2.0145714285714327,95.58042857142858,87.80952380952381,5.2647619047619045,15.542857142857144,6.742157984588678,-0.5033771428571429,155,3,37,2,5,51,33,42,0.068,0.603,0.32899999999999996,0.9079999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,3,0,1,2,5,0,0,3,0,2,1,1,0,0,7,8,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,8,5,6,7,0,4,0,0,1,1,4,0,1,2,3,24,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724361825158941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801188598780476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15991419552173364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26526991625167023,0.2529477657605489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6282493679760147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251508365869986,0.0,0.0,0.2520240055301615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4073314060659756
mentalhealth,blissventurer,2020/01/01,"Doctor has out me on citalopram. So on the 10th of December I went to the doctor for the following reasons:

continuous low mood or sadness

feeling hopeless and helpless

low self-esteem 

having no motivation or interest in things

not enjoying life like I used to

Anxiety all the time

Sweating

Struggling to talk and form sentences

Brain fog 

lack of energy and constant tiredness

Neck stiffness and tight trapizius

Light noise or low buzzing in ear

low sex drive. Struggle to maintain erection

He said I have a chemical imbalance in the brain and told me citalopram has helped 90% of his patients get back on track. I had a really rough break up about 14 months ago.

But Ive been feeling this way since I was around 15 and I am 24 now and it's slowly gotten worse and I realise it's not normal to feel this way.

But it was only past 3 years it got really bad and that's why my ex left me. But I'm certain it might be hormonal? Maybe low hormone levels as most of my life I've struggled to maintain an erection or get horny even though I am sexually attracted to females.

I just want this sorted so I can enjoy life once again and have fun. I've been on citalopram since the 10 of Dec. Not sure if it's doing much...

Has anyone been through something similar?",3.9237804878048768,5.767264914634152,4.6525284552845525,83.61391463414637,72.6178861788618,7.5216260162601625,29.77967479674797,8.238735603445708,2.1948933333333343,1003,43,189,16,20,322,157,246,0.17800000000000002,0.73,0.09300000000000001,-0.9662,0,0,1,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,1,10,21,0,3,9,0,19,12,5,3,3,41,33,22,0,4,12,1,5,1,0,1,6,2,0,0,11,12,0,2,5,0,0,3,4,12,0,0,11,8,17,8,26,20,5,33,0,8,0,1,7,17,0,8,11,116,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368363793177065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981089581588345,0.0,0.0,0.08967360802485558,0.0,0.0,0.11416743210246558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986143827960842,0.10708127469679013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28633316535938325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13858994674659328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625334253617576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847062397744611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19453731207899946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400801238719562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257121178204556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08596157110189914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13934124378596993,0.0,0.2717549275143505,0.062655232387483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884181420438054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605029145418232,0.0,0.0,0.1023659014066882,0.0,0.09427664164008684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12565528421583705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657936254026454,0.0,0.09753797465613433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242671492715385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643172175111136,0.13185975153882393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219927056772898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379007363126993,0.0,0.0,0.21217525331657705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873116261407948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4022162814810069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087171612197335,0.0,0.0,0.10308045282404386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520191579585831,0.0,0.12600248124003144,0.0,0.07478212700841973,0.0,0.0,0.12254594681151484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076463122851794,0.0,0.0,0.07564367644886752,0.20359373338731887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188866830483558,0.11572338773192599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069512127439814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258716140751123
mentalhealth,FairyPrincessDog,2020/01/01,"I can’t handle my sister anymore I am from the US. My younger sister is struggling with her mental health. She is diagnosed with a personality disorder, but it’s unspecified. Personally, there’s no doubt in my mind that she has BPD, but I’m not a medical professional so I can’t diagnose her. She attends school in a different state, and earlier this year attempted suicide. My parents flew to her apartment to spend time with her and take care of her, leaving their jobs for a month.
Prior to the attempt, she and I had a falling out. She has a tendency to get drunk and call or text me the most horrendous and offensive things about myself, and when she went too far I called her out on it (causing us to lose contact). Without me to calm her down, she eventually attempted suicide. I feel responsible every day for that, and it’s exhausting. 
Since coming home, she has been an absolute monster - her bipolar swings are intense and hard to handle. But because she presents so well in therapy, none of this is being dealt with. My mom tried to have a conversation with her yesterday, but she went into an angry mood swing and left the house, and now she is texting me nonstop that she needs help financially separating from our parents due to emotional abuse. Guys, she is NOT emotionally abused and she does NOT have the capacity to support herself. 
I am so overwhelmed by caring for her and always taking the fall for her. It’s not my problem to solve, but I’m scared she’ll hurt herself again. I’m really at a loss here and don’t know what to do. I know this is horrible to say, but sometimes I wish she was just normal",5.074562937062937,6.3484531346153865,5.976806526806531,77.4712237762238,68.93589743589743,9.390675990675991,32.13053613053613,9.688023934748609,3.0968410256410266,1286,56,241,29,22,424,176,312,0.205,0.6859999999999999,0.11,-0.9905,4,0,0,0,2,2,36.0,3,0,1,5,12,16,1,4,16,0,23,7,0,1,0,46,41,24,2,4,13,5,2,0,0,1,6,1,1,3,12,22,1,0,3,1,1,7,10,10,1,0,6,3,52,5,38,33,2,31,0,4,0,0,47,12,0,3,11,178,64,3,0.0,0.24861504905871384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729796923726722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404782779035524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395541876779473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213720066539011,0.0,0.2142605890874472,0.0,0.2139363670661845,0.10777695661905112,0.0,0.09037527739773862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766171623816825,0.0,0.0,0.212973727603867,0.0,0.1096142024238701,0.12024207150932405,0.0,0.09181212290186028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360312773336497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839570069831226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05304834932955256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054813936037021886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038826834661084,0.0,0.0,0.09398353906683668,0.0,0.0,0.11152010261175363,0.0,0.0,0.07032254230302466,0.0,0.10523864242120956,0.0,0.0,0.12105821860384493,0.11231404365095367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411228835195696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531745651263417,0.0,0.0,0.11109019872633118,0.11399082619231535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737343152790565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569116953283478,0.10572998850587163,0.0,0.10593458753982886,0.12287558068077528,0.08374242513001305,0.0,0.0,0.07779339680504438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279475964198106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23299214306282484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832160599328456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038981328308502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721145467340874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343289104789094,0.10503856009225948,0.10617992738896699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678705516749402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376395603574833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968029514756232,0.0,0.22952071166198165,0.1190566869355447,0.0,0.0,0.1577665607987135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997983717777905,0.0,0.06970109144178517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611769796974264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123063047604376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524004773717457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433149239259324,0.19451514649549206,0.0,0.0,0.12064746570881504,0.1011346458916642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06756204054113807
mentalhealth,plantschmant,2020/01/01,"My mom said that if I commit suicide, I'll go to hell. Fear keeps me here but that's no way to live My parents are quite religious. My whole family is. I've stepped away over the last couple years. My mom and I just had a pretty morbid conversation. She straight up was like, ""I'm sorry but if you kill yourself, you're going to hell. You will burn for eternity. You don't want that. I don't want you to go through that."" I told her that fear is no way to live, and while she agreed, she said that she is thankful for the fear because at least it keeps me here. She said the only good thing about the fear is that it keeps me here.

I asked her what my funeral would even be like because it's not like anyone can say ""May God bless her soul."" She said that it's true none of them can say that and believe it and that while none of my family would openly talk about that, every believer at my funeral would know where I was. When I asked what my funeral would even be like, she said that all everyone can do is say good things about me and talk about good memories. 

Apparently, all this mess I'm going through is happening for a reason. God has a plan, apparently. But no if this pain pushes me too far, then I did something wrong and I am to blame for my own eternal suffering. I hate it. I don't even remember what I initially wrote this post for. People that couldn't take the pain anymore shouldn't be punished for it.",2.73468467131622,4.09164520477816,3.6751891972102686,91.403076124054,74.7679180887372,7.416471286541031,22.97803828461196,8.04050195162591,0.9044024039174948,1107,30,251,17,23,355,137,293,0.23199999999999998,0.613,0.154,-0.9842,3,0,1,0,0,2,34.0,0,4,1,2,15,24,5,4,8,0,31,2,0,1,4,35,56,16,5,11,8,3,0,4,0,7,2,8,0,0,28,7,0,3,3,0,0,6,11,14,0,0,11,8,41,10,25,34,7,26,4,1,0,0,33,9,2,4,12,169,69,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290304139386052,0.05845104878996999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629869349031258,0.0,0.07853955705575506,0.0,0.0,0.10191656744917936,0.0,0.0,0.18836420510947816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249545638287224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16563965684863147,0.0,0.0704317676751228,0.07987789578074644,0.0,0.0,0.1576104533074175,0.3762671229175718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19003417278969198,0.2103446922821829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392212619046498,0.0,0.0,0.08253202310779241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229072520483512,0.0924846608513557,0.0,0.04594121796547398,0.06814047736895253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16335972761183315,0.0,0.14763052249453373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19580916906786644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357720003772252,0.17790036848709306,0.0,0.09282153068923618,0.0,0.0,0.05795373293214812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006019148510912,0.08504541296683522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891278310178065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08594881972957763,0.0,0.0,0.09469599847885522,0.0,0.397586410796991,0.19943252733991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435494378063211,0.0,0.09357692776112732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143855025018308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285247851024887,0.13437979601847502,0.0,0.0769623614354954,0.0,0.0,0.11107262096116934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987789578074644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861211832894977,0.13270646186396134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333000362705672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23753184951504,0.09139719817185953,0.0,0.053831961344942655
mentalhealth,BobbyBoucherProdigy,2020/01/01,"Am I the only one who feels this way? I feel... empty. 

I’ve had 4 or 5 therapy sessions.. been on serotonin for almost 3 months. Out of those 3 months I used marijuana probably 70/90 days, but I think the major reason I kept using it was because it made me feel creative again. 

I’m 24M live in my parents basement, I have a puppy that’s about 2 years old, I’m a full time real estate broker & I just started a new start up for a marketing company. While these jobs can be lucrative, I’m currently sitting almost $30,000 in debt between credit cards & just found out I’m getting audited by the IRS for $4,500

I started to really explore what was going on in my head because I have constant racing thoughts. One thought would turn into 20 in a matter of seconds.  And sometimes they lead to suicide ideation, I tried talking to my girlfriend at the time, but it didn’t go anywhere. We eventually broke up 2 or so weeks later. I think about her almost every day. 

I struggle with finishing things & setting realistic goals in almost every aspect of my life. In business settings it’s never to make “just enough money” or anything. It’s always to be the absolute greatest at my job. I put together plans that I think are solid constantly... ways to sell 50 houses, or whatever it is. 

And I think my “condition” helps with this sometimes because I take ideas to a whole new level. 

But lately I’ve just felt empty. Not sad, not happy, I don’t get excited very often. People who meet me the first time will describe me as “the most chilled dude they know” but inside my brain is always going 100 miles per hour. 

So far my therapist & medicine doctor have different ideas. Therapist thought it was a mood disorder, then a hint of bipolar (no confirmed people with bipolar in my family, but there are a few that I could see it) while my medicine doctor thinks I’m depressed. 

Also side note because if you actually read this you deserve this lol. 

But when I first started therapy... I actually didn’t know I was going to therapy. I was only there because I wanted an adderall prescription.   Of course like most, I googled my symptoms and came up with ADHD. 

So I went to the doctor, and she referred me to my now therapist. I showed up thinking I was going to a normal appointment. But suddenly someone was asking how I felt.

So I left therapy and head home. Thinking the whole way home “holy crap I need therapy?” And I get home to 4 cops outside my house & my little brother on his way to the hospital for another freak out episode. 

My little brother was born with brain damage, and is essentially a 300 pound 6’ 1” 6 year old in a 21 year old body. So naturally when he throws tantrums they get super dangerous. 

To this day, no one in my family knows I’ve gone to therapy. 

BUT my little brother started to go to therapy, and he now has the same therapist....

Long post. But it felt good. I also do this really weird thing where I ramble (see this post) but it makes me feel like a freak. I always feel I have so much to say, but no one listens or no one wants to hear it.",4.156666164960863,5.417212442052982,5.431848284166166,80.56870559903673,71.10264900662251,8.338591210114389,29.952438290186638,8.776555601660561,2.4334284768211925,2401,98,456,43,44,802,298,604,0.067,0.8809999999999999,0.052000000000000005,-0.7902,8,0,0,0,0,1,88.0,1,2,3,6,24,19,3,1,25,1,31,13,6,8,1,94,92,40,1,7,23,4,8,2,1,2,7,3,3,0,28,19,0,1,27,2,6,13,10,11,0,8,24,13,66,7,60,63,11,97,0,4,2,0,25,32,1,13,45,285,94,12,0.0,0.0,0.096312034031724,0.0,0.059306075127957374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19765747142376447,0.0,0.0,0.07892631565215022,0.12318315671090987,0.2673398420311625,0.0,0.0,0.05174513008848016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040608767141978634,0.0,0.04613322758551115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15040881327515718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05481391999048036,0.0,0.11017620429302244,0.0,0.056440364935815064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665417864917534,0.0,0.03939994324440477,0.0,0.0,0.09547511663235003,0.0,0.042502907797354654,0.0,0.0,0.051557608166203715,0.056556481467590985,0.1515276946879326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050989132953901735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315475183694165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304081499231896,0.0,0.12475783010401988,0.03525384590837008,0.1421439437826197,0.0,0.0,0.08394987383324494,0.0,0.05410695911233437,0.0,0.0,0.10312807551400688,0.0,0.1682718430952448,0.041390320647219404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052531304613395766,0.0,0.0,0.10128949193023452,0.0,0.0556181906455357,0.0,0.03307657220631375,0.0,0.14849862253016913,0.0,0.048597322456697414,0.1138807209660725,0.0,0.11141458506952466,0.0,0.0,0.09793950873957367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136024492443296,0.0,0.05566610107988785,0.0,0.053616175836767324,0.0,0.03485558088002957,0.04821736717006474,0.1483774016044831,0.04357472439928217,0.043670962386901546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046693773895543335,0.06587964533244431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877736728029419,0.0,0.036276072023865145,0.03659052733771534,0.038059814796313415,0.09532019746916118,0.0,0.0,0.04835004791319114,0.0,0.0,0.15534562121695553,0.0,0.16719563047845418,0.07506195664448367,0.0,0.0,0.05479453096500067,0.0,0.0,0.06842265129885891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452248005006032,0.0,0.0532049242659825,0.0,0.0,0.04960784210998493,0.0,0.0,0.04936082899913957,0.056168229941034334,0.06322651203412957,0.05073742297834925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03924309268051555,0.0,0.0,0.07864709686712773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04181195532010665,0.0,0.09761182891937548,0.0,0.17464198352092505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051588695221306165,0.0,0.05397812809026902,0.0,0.0,0.05129092120226527,0.037103159734428334,0.03966363105267486,0.0,0.0,0.3950319673353617,0.22918488712893184,0.06556853914634209,0.22133908533817387,0.0,0.11752914864487722,0.08632472831855001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033503696184498964,0.053675882176182986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524074829653379,0.0,0.040716834854728816,0.0582128384565257,0.15667891446879026,0.039583567748207434,0.0,0.0,0.045745603597177616,0.0,0.11018938678845584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035055030300569695,0.0,0.0,0.09533446769040084
mentalhealth,willGG27,2020/01/01,"What is my problem! I am in love with a girl. We talk everyday. I have made lots and lots of fake accounts harassing her and making her feel uncomfortable, so that she can feel comfortable with me. What is my issue here",1.7100000000000009,4.278218604651165,3.1314418604651166,87.92925581395347,83.88372093023256,7.1609302325581385,22.55348837209302,8.238735603445708,1.5110595348837212,172,6,35,4,5,56,34,43,0.22699999999999998,0.633,0.14,-0.5707,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,1,0,5,1,0,2,0,12,10,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,9,2,4,9,2,2,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,2,1,28,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34245067378729993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3534496558622585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5757951265708086,0.30563363996565673,0.3204270689636942,0.2260432162269245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32403043294149997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27218406186438066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TrainerH4ppy,2020/01/01,Ive been crying and i dont know why (M 16) This may be a joke but i asure you its not. Ive had this for probably almost 4years now ever since i came to canada. From time to time i would just sit on my chair and tears would just go falling in my eyes this happens mostly once every 1-2 weeks. I dont know why i do this im very happy on what im doing rn and i have no problems with family or friends. I dont know if someone is going to take this seriously but it would be appreciated if someone were to give me an advice for my problem,-0.2731267217630844,1.3827576033057871,2.775557851239672,93.12273071625349,84.53719008264463,5.355647382920111,18.34779614325069,6.42735559955562,-0.20700055096418746,414,10,101,4,12,148,78,121,0.146,0.731,0.12300000000000001,0.0457,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,4,6,0,0,2,0,18,1,1,0,1,25,27,8,0,7,8,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,3,1,0,4,5,3,0,0,4,1,15,3,11,17,1,13,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,6,5,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356108679543798,0.0,0.0,0.13896469875563294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587234371555465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243955681665045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4879353550430328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553136182852276,0.11692525413669412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13082620893865862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10721844155122932,0.0,0.0,0.13312714111098187,0.15773985718052222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271967148423298,0.14773025007873794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998050414226058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228803937340038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779252865116602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496246252606788,0.26558088997837664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479742115363177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23516989197885765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434271729243724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184347976040275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450521245897018,0.0,0.0,0.11131820169872876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25044855648580977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29574870246989665,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway7603825,2020/01/01,"Today I f***ed up. Not really today, more like the last month. 

Me and my boyfriend decided to start trying for another baby recently, but my med check appointment wasnt for another month. With the meds I'm on I really cant get pregnant on three out of the four I'm on, and I'm an impatient peice of shit so I just stopped taking them and figured I'd be fine till I made it to my appointment which is in two days now. I told myself I'd keep taking the one depression med but I guess I mixed up my meds so much i just started forgetting to take that one too. So for like 3 weeks now I've been completely unmedicated. 

My boyfriend just cleaned our entire house while I cried in the bathroom about how much of a peice of shit I am for him having to. He works, and I dont, so it's my responsibility to keep the house in check but it's just gone to shit completely this last month. I cant get the energy to do anything. Taking plates from the dining room into the kitchen seems overwhelming. I've stopped cooking for my daughter. I gave her a bag of cheese it's for breakfast because I couldn't even put them in a fucking bowl for her. God. It just seems like everything has come to a head today and I'm breaking down i think. I took my med after coming out of the bathroom (wellbutrin). 

I just wanted to talk about it because my boyfriend just doesnt understand mental health and mental illness. He knows I NEED meds but cant relate to me about it. 

I know I'm a dumbass for quitting my meds. I know. I've been officially medicated for about a year and a half now and this is the first lapse I've had. I dont know why I did it. Testing my brain maybe? Idfk. I'm stupid. 

Thanks for reading. Take your meds.",1.3120695624803282,3.4519402124645917,3.0760930122757344,90.47329595530377,81.71954674220963,6.415140069247719,22.27014479068304,7.594959193182576,0.8914293988039033,1337,44,291,22,36,444,167,353,0.134,0.8109999999999999,0.054000000000000006,-0.9847,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,1,2,3,21,12,5,1,19,0,19,13,5,2,0,47,56,19,0,3,12,1,0,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,12,14,4,4,10,2,2,5,9,7,0,7,10,0,43,5,47,44,3,43,0,2,0,1,13,14,4,3,26,181,55,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845146435848522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05825119134603893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863014878692515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902105394648554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219524640177744,0.14843642685940844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775555726761721,0.04565138416450683,0.0,0.060968238858632874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592231147971806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04675376206888482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361826895642186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021089173969326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544090361916756,0.07396596452820142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797922092985292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264728765518086,0.0752426531492931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16335604684639865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583644308345054,0.0,0.0,0.15560945837085946,0.11540075825246042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10374800611672068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697982109006828,0.0,0.0,0.0711144721082432,0.0,0.6290220297756844,0.0713098699145572,0.1426721221791198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950313262913355,0.0,0.1040723253358978,0.05248723266947896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593341880260302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115990231640458,0.0,0.07529006975343829,0.0708055746921621,0.0,0.09069518505119684,0.0,0.0698930489086816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888259439625033,0.0,0.0,0.21798372526232204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020598324062792,0.0,0.0,0.11836123158259293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661128876033545,0.056895442155387714,0.0,0.0651706240511521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04535707898920677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20129174478401754,0.06763945672700275,0.0786463159479301,0.048059331878247,0.0,0.06914804557867665,0.07369115847321002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04175166386942311,0.0,0.05678059545610175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387373291778486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051533356008209984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04558413293604298
mentalhealth,Hanniell,2020/01/01,"Feeling empty and alone, thinking about death and the passing of time after Christmas and New Year Another decade has passed. It's just a day like any other but it is still a symbol of the time passing by. Today I have been feeling so empty and alone, thinking about the death of my loved ones and that time just passes by. And it sucks. I had a really good Christmas and new year with friends and family but now that it's over it's back to normal day life but something feels off. I feel hollow and empty. Just wanted to write here, shoutouts to people who feel the same.",2.5880450522928413,4.890456380530979,3.0358326629123087,91.59402252614643,78.11504424778761,5.1710378117457765,20.892196299275945,6.1124844417494595,0.15817522123893826,453,12,89,3,11,140,67,113,0.161,0.696,0.14300000000000002,-0.0799,0,2,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,10,5,1,0,7,0,5,2,0,0,0,27,15,13,2,2,6,0,5,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,9,10,0,0,7,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,2,5,4,4,14,13,1,20,0,0,0,1,4,2,1,0,15,61,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3599314263250779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816456834655073,0.18220530115273967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361276090909616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241250831893984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16380797271341574,0.0,0.43929811300882055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342486011823038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574387629211927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273370653895282,0.084891659282636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156827586085958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3356421223815547,0.0,0.0,0.1702505148930651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774607639659215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046515067466185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131681035797224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377098604277748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387670858747286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22268019442853404,0.0,0.0,0.3039672157228085,0.0,0.16470668549897205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10248971974551456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237949138539028
mentalhealth,anellerr,2020/01/01,"Need advice on getting mental health help This is going to be a long post so if you read all the way through, thank you. 

The past two years I have been struggling with anxiety, depression and suicidal ideation. I was doing okay this past semester, but these last few days have been really rough on my mental health, and I planned out a suicide attempt which made me realize I desperately need help. The suicide hotlines are useless, and I was just denied online therapy. I am a low income student so I of course do not have insurance, and because I’m only taking 6 credits this semester, I don’t qualify for my schools mental health services. I just don’t know what to do. I can’t afford any sort of therapy (I’ve checked every nearby therapist and they’re all over $100, even with sliding fee scales), and I don’t qualify for insurance. I just feel lost. I don’t have any family or friends to fall back on, and this particular year has been awful on me. Do any of you have some advice? I’m trying to get into law enforcement after graduation (not policing), so I’m scared of being diagnosed with any sort of mental illness. But at the same time, I feel that therapy and possibly medication would really help. However I don’t even know where to start on that since I can’t even pay for the initial appointment. Any advice would be helpful. Sorry for the rant, and thank you for reading.",4.2830419331911855,6.014506522388063,5.414008528784648,78.97718905472637,71.4626865671642,8.985358919687277,29.92608386638237,9.48565724429506,2.897521819474058,1100,46,202,26,21,364,147,268,0.192,0.7170000000000001,0.091,-0.9839,3,0,0,0,0,2,33.0,0,4,0,3,11,11,0,2,9,2,30,6,0,1,2,40,48,16,3,5,9,0,3,0,1,2,6,0,0,0,9,14,0,0,5,2,4,3,9,6,0,1,7,3,24,5,29,36,5,27,0,4,0,0,9,11,0,5,11,133,33,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616508064040414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034752833227192,0.0,0.06827825126132242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06862999804391419,0.0,0.05440776098519835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05756075960194215,0.0,0.07687342244978491,0.09058985064009054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768521661403968,0.0,0.07519944749599111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413972415814308,0.0,0.09025793174651196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895659646467561,0.0,0.09326194990257808,0.0,0.0507245000049533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846150899257556,0.0,0.0,0.23929744482705975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09810215822587674,0.0727530547564009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789860391755572,0.0,0.0,0.09743012227060817,0.0,0.0,0.08445328549192227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991294249931835,0.3597838653504035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323598413126767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788087923949017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040405197987088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061927412867716,0.08547964029348012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17855417696191692,0.0,0.11435543169892395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935775860491807,0.09032873558031793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738309504516916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991135390024523,0.06317368703657507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933065469376544,0.0,0.2928846748685354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710709973269359,0.0,0.0,0.16434422275561428,0.3062055301949846,0.1036295371328994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05204410436680624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059688439906071,0.0,0.08718714889685414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084482571379896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680544898875964,0.0,0.0,0.11495192821051628
mentalhealth,KingstonKracker,2020/01/01,"Am I the only one who feels this way? Hello everyone, 

I just want to start off by saying that I do currently see a therapist and she does help me but I still struggle a lot in the in between.

I’m posting because I feel so lost all of the time. A little bit about myself: 

I’m a 25 year old male. I am overweight. I work as a High School Teacher, and I coach to sports as well. I have a a girlfriend of 6 years. I own a home, have pets, debts etc. 

What I really want to know is if anyone else shares the same feelings that I do, because honestly, the struggle has gotten pretty bad these past few years...

I think I may be depressed. I struggle with the fact that I probably am because I don’t want to be and even my therapist has told me that I should explore anti-depressants to help me. I don’t want to take them because I don’t want the side-effects and what if it makes me worse. 

I literally don’t have many feelings anymore. I know what they are and what they feel like but I don’t really get them. I seldom feel happy, excited, hopeful or loving. I often just feel sad, tired, and nothing seems to excite me anymore. I often feel as though I hate myself. I struggle to look in the mirror because let’s be honest, I’m about 5’7 and I’m overweight. I’m working on losing it but I still eat like crap and I have no motivation to do otherwise. My relationship has gone on for 6 years and we bought a house and all that. Since I’ve been living here I think it’s been bad but I know it’s not living with her because I felt like this even when I was still in college. I didn’t really do anything socially, stopped going to the football games and stuff. Spent a lot of time in my room, other than when I got into coaching, that brightened my day. I feel like most of the time that I don’t know what love feels like anymore and that I can’t put those feelings forward. I constantly worry about money. I constantly think that people are talking badly about me including the kids that I teach and that nobody really likes me at all. 

When I have to go visit my parents I get upset to leave because we live an hour away from them. I feel like I don’t see them enough and it makes me very sad because on top of all of this, I constantly worry about the fact that they’re getting older and so am I. It freaks me out to no end. I’m even almost in tears thinking about that right now. I’m not sure if I’m in love because I don’t know how it feels anymore, I hate myself and how I look (I’ve been losing my hair since high school too) and I just can’t. I literally can’t. I’m glad when she has to work late because I get to be alone at home for a little while and that bugs me too. I don’t want to feel like that. She wants to get married and I can’t even decide whether I want to because I can’t feel anything, about anything.

When I’m coaching I usually feel better but even then I’m still paranoid that I suck at it and I have a hard time taking criticism there and at work because I automatically take it personally. 

I don’t know what to do. I don’t know if I’m alone in this or not. I apologize for the long post. I just needed to vent. I just feel so trapped in my own mind.",1.7458416099684584,3.2556555958395283,3.4973519981230967,91.01789056593935,77.73699851411591,6.327561846667187,23.09973671176456,7.0608816371341465,0.6434423972263499,2468,76,555,27,57,826,253,673,0.191,0.672,0.13699999999999998,-0.9909,3,3,0,0,0,0,65.0,2,0,6,10,40,41,4,5,26,0,50,9,2,5,7,112,132,49,0,15,20,1,20,8,1,2,3,1,4,3,40,27,3,1,33,5,4,7,22,19,1,1,13,25,99,22,65,112,14,72,0,6,4,3,33,28,2,15,44,367,139,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04750844047200868,0.09827561552598878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18820730373094796,0.033174037128332126,0.04861211538376616,0.11712742346704318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04457531961783155,0.0,0.11884159433695884,0.3470579976793924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04196047533013597,0.05179669938587552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15381074120639954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030597537328344318,0.0,0.08172711511213318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04151867575743684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048547186944239616,0.03963348068782408,0.0,0.0420214148644927,0.04902246639523748,0.05291274353004419,0.15668199402105532,0.0,0.0,0.04533489706720603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4078159994165349,0.169470471081398,0.04555380270059932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393799235764552,0.0,0.05392718209753412,0.0,0.03794540292180998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05050515601895755,0.04250061932696391,0.0936825071759564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360159726268039,0.10025465128356484,0.09518065662220962,0.047122723799405915,0.04672290876539935,0.05474415324606447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18251836219203466,0.0,0.053519042420466914,0.05023648070612593,0.0,0.04851483487900987,0.0,0.18543043388467348,0.09510295969070573,0.1256821015848683,0.041986559920425964,0.07968223610101499,0.10615568602751672,0.05179086974695688,0.08067060128507149,0.12846053242485658,0.0,0.06333864712623602,0.04810089870639348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04790504404593008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03517921943130253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045523919979265186,0.0,0.04978463092413859,0.0,0.032149368705566006,0.0360833969317711,0.0,0.0,0.052681089033285805,0.0,0.0452907881811492,0.03289178428474035,0.0414263821894091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087671888905907,0.04826773421113115,0.05115279395412228,0.0,0.0,0.0476944523644992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157569199238626,0.0,0.0,0.05093723754182824,0.0,0.0405170257150529,0.0,0.037729474512049985,0.0,0.09603198004522742,0.07561365412385837,0.043191351863533685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849254520110782,0.0,0.0,0.048363313278439235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033581197688112636,0.0,0.15155576625609612,0.039665415056493465,0.0,0.1983956134454808,0.054312175160358515,0.0,0.0,0.04471552875718055,0.0,0.10701623831587186,0.03813379258970245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017257773074787,0.0,0.12160112494954035,0.046613614451201366,0.0,0.11066020928812563,0.054530045329387176,0.0,0.04533489706720603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0522530036632498,0.03914637399680746,0.2238702054091742,0.037658940123244514,0.0,0.0,0.04265796849670538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381595597131525,0.0963636290815673,0.04834961925973802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122209850554778
mentalhealth,iihateanime,2020/01/01,I'm too depressed to show up to work tomorrow i can't show up to work tomorrow I can't do it anymore im too scared to hand in my notice and genuinely couldn't handle another 2 weeks of working there what do I do,-0.046875,1.8191630625,3.1498333333333366,89.57850000000002,85.04166666666666,7.173333333333334,24.18333333333333,8.238735603445708,1.5772033333333335,169,7,39,4,5,61,31,48,0.13699999999999998,0.7929999999999999,0.07,-0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,0,0,6,1,1,0,0,2,7,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,8,6,0,6,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,24,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3065093353399463,0.0,0.0,0.28988996010555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517635572025061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157416780248969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33279341251554545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926502613398341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344710124438911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6384088469388182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meenanezami,2020/01/01,"Wildflower- Short inspirational poem 
[Wildflower ](https://wrytin.com/meenanezami/wildflower-k4vjaqj9)",52.325,55.61203316666668,26.295000000000005,-90.78749999999997,134.0,27.26666666666667,68.16666666666667,8.841846274778883,20.377466666666674,93,4,1,4,4,21,6,6,0.0,0.602,0.39799999999999996,0.5106,3,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tibbersbear,2020/01/01,"I'm just really afraid... I need to get back into therapy...but I'm just so afraid. I've had so many negative experiences and it's made me not really want to search for therapists and open up. I'm afraid of having to meet new therapists and not clicking. Then searching again. I'm afraid to fully open up. I'm afraid... I just don't know how to get over this fear. 

I will reach out to therapists, but if they don't have an appointment right away I usually stop looking. It gives me so much anxiety just to look up therapists and reach out. I go into an almost panic attack. Even just thinking about it right now is making me feel afraid. 

I don't have a general practitioner either... because between my insurance being strange about approving certain things, and doctors not wanting to see me because I'm pregnant, it gets so tedious and frustrating to find a doctor that will see me... It makes me so anxious and upset. I just don't know what to do. 

I really need to know how to get over this. I just don't know what to do. I'm just so anxious about trying to call and get appointments. Once I establish a place I can go and a person to see, it's easier for me to actually call and make appointments. Finding a new one is what makes me so anxious and afraid.",2.6945849802371526,4.564780098814231,4.379584980237155,84.1458992094862,76.07509881422925,8.236363636363638,25.72924901185771,8.97023862654752,2.0674442687747043,987,36,200,23,22,332,114,253,0.157,0.809,0.034,-0.9849,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,1,1,24,13,2,10,7,0,17,2,0,7,1,54,52,23,0,5,14,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,13,17,0,1,8,0,0,2,9,12,0,1,2,7,21,1,33,47,2,25,0,0,6,0,6,15,0,2,8,133,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0937079557675116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615661103780328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345996557338323,0.32544764109736496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924394101764373,0.0902200035992124,0.07383840682022835,0.0,0.11707365596112145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961074681093511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19657426549891924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342455953521238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939322866627198,0.0,0.10805644460087112,0.04855385453156319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17553285731206578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508492639526224,0.0921173135408574,0.10914808025265693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21109448566178526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16127605341838225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908625415881156,0.2563935837450422,0.09735574061212487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059048408242971,0.14240478053420166,0.0,0.18548587282973286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022650271548012,0.06507000253046467,0.0,0.0,0.11266634006263547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384658556067251,0.10032719408513216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18455099363003868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16401211420048498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22956192593878136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028240559669557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44597640329319616,0.06379570141818335,0.06152986688976603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519565102469008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575955975158502,0.0,0.1132777673325557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HollieL,2020/01/01,I’m always available I know sometimes people feel like that have no one to talk to. But my messages are always open and you can come talk to me about anything you want to. <3,0.4866666666666682,2.955938777777781,1.312444444444445,98.47700000000002,91.77777777777777,2.8800000000000003,18.31111111111111,3.1291,-0.8642155555555555,140,4,29,0,5,43,29,36,0.059000000000000004,0.838,0.10300000000000001,0.1531,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,8,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,5,1,5,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,18,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5173942426723083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558475876363782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26781635709311097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15720245709142394,0.22210995470574665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708647652418144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518920413110267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21067666778308186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155417599024061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074921096038505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4997858854590067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833792963536224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,damnoriginal,2020/01/01,"It's been a year since I've felt a thing. My emotions used to be very strong, to the point I was always suicidal either out of depression or mania. Bad was horrible and good was weird and trippy.
My psychiatrist said it is normal for an overwheled brain to ""shut down"" emotions, but neither I nor him imagined that a year later i would be making no progress at all.
Im very worried life is just going to be like this forever and in this case, do you think living like this is worh it?",2.9582653061224486,4.583330081632656,4.1181122448979615,87.35635204081633,74.71428571428571,6.940816326530613,24.494897959183675,7.645422480735847,1.1459551020408163,380,12,78,5,8,124,72,98,0.157,0.71,0.133,-0.1388,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,2,1,7,0,0,5,0,12,2,1,2,1,16,18,6,1,2,4,0,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,8,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,6,2,7,4,10,8,3,10,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,1,5,53,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619803712866215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16254065293206071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21731521120476996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766829905001449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379533026002945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869129628175391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063499405855796,0.16327929122265614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21027614433906966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750061493248,0.19021107865419834,0.0,0.17189647250571244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12994320444584562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19073448647897026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18402531921615056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851749905843228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16103237614491905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21293651168409009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932956825304207,0.124736164704233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681316881279329,0.0,0.3212449593021787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19769602482878068,0.0,0.13828741627905886,0.0,0.0,0.2507211681406096
mentalhealth,cruchy_hodo,2020/01/01,"Mental barrier stopping me from having sex I have developed a severe mental barrier once its sexy time. I'm coming out of a 2 year relationship with loads of great sex and really wanted to go all out. Partying, tinder all that. I was never that type of guy though. There were now several instances in which my counterpart was waiting but i just couldnt get going. At first it was just frustrating but at this point i have a lot of pressure built up. 
There is no problem getting hard in any other circumstance, but in the crucial moment my menhood decides to fuck off to barbieland or something.
I've tried to stop masturbating, stopped watching porn... Nothing helped. 

It seems to me, that I need the trust of a relationship to actually feel relaxed. 
At this point, it has become so much of a burden, that i totally isolated myself again. I have had a severe depression before and dont want to travel down this hole again. 

Has anyone here experiance with this?
I can't exactly face the insecurity at will.",4.90427304964539,6.8904271223404265,5.993744680851066,74.4136666666667,70.32978723404256,9.268652482269504,30.08652482269504,9.725611199111238,3.1728073758865247,801,33,137,20,15,266,125,188,0.242,0.6859999999999999,0.07200000000000001,-0.986,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,10,10,2,2,9,0,16,5,1,0,5,33,29,8,0,5,6,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,14,7,0,6,3,2,0,4,5,7,0,1,5,3,13,3,28,22,5,29,0,1,1,4,4,14,1,3,11,104,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.13024804780277455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076458181361824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332574369060297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14740778643195485,0.11357364616144315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497309969342948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11495802829215103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15642654384040566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305598533578462,0.0,0.0,0.0674867434065672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135300203136376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339141478499455,0.13946575466293346,0.0,0.15170883046045391,0.0,0.0,0.14715180268574987,0.0,0.13215687372118334,0.0,0.0,0.1195634372342531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946252669652524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347192730527822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26901393520646394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811624498564656,0.0989667553328106,0.10294075141891676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806863606443505,0.0,0.0,0.1421418281544516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25234570843486503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277133342562743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550468116073076,0.0,0.0,0.2865949390932645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150661730055914,0.0,0.45235134592111104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027521851673779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3347621826632175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13113418237089072,0.0,0.07782777755403175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061777307643358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15744883061078951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595068747000227
mentalhealth,Freggy5,2020/01/01,I think my depression and anxiety will be the death of me and I’m tired of fighting I’ve had major depression for 20 years and major anxiety recently. I’ve been to psychiatrists hospitals and nothing seems to work. My life is not bad I have friends family but it’s my brain chemistry. I try exercising and eating healthy but it takes sooo much. Effort I am tired of fighting I just want to crawl under my covers and not wake up . But I’ll fight another day . It’s so hard,0.5549624060150364,3.0489034210526316,2.8311654135338347,86.85065789473688,93.73684210526315,6.924812030075188,22.57518796992481,7.957251820313856,1.7627293233082706,375,15,75,10,14,127,63,95,0.27,0.6629999999999999,0.067,-0.9531,0,0,0,0,5,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,3,7,3,0,1,0,7,7,2,0,0,15,12,10,1,1,6,0,1,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,3,6,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,6,0,0,2,1,10,1,9,8,3,5,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,1,3,45,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21458228898364015,0.31309721318163475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708653792716026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284452862356339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197550528212704,0.0,0.3525112886187297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20939722887621687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19291584556669145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581039187789703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18331673723569275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445428838675634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15043352982021674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19635705570725906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20205675280714286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862960546412199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538633863848715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13112468608073316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4704058505216037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893674253768604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070163996956584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14897994491380656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178108587908385
mentalhealth,SpongeyBandGeek,2020/01/01,"Any suggestions for coping?      Most of my anxiety comes from my excessive worrying and worrying over pointless things, but I’ve been starting to have panic attacks more often. I find it extremely frightening when I feel like I will die because of the attacks. Breathing heavily and not being able to register my emotions is all very overwhelming. Can anyone provide me with tips on how to help calm myself down during a situation like this?",8.046103896103897,9.462709714285717,8.039376623376622,64.85335064935066,62.24675324675325,11.874285714285715,40.07532467532467,11.602472056035307,5.49871116883117,356,19,51,11,5,115,65,77,0.273,0.597,0.129,-0.938,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,2,2,2,0,6,1,1,1,1,12,9,5,1,0,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,1,1,8,3,11,6,3,6,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,2,4,40,11,0,0.210521401840855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316177233825586,0.0,0.1610482961858379,0.0,0.0,0.1472014590335268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4789969729006344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12833189257317815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813455468470493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21848797806789147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23680824166493386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644594623110636,0.15039653153927188,0.0,0.0,0.19241274736577604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110805805322882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20570024618538327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470015056902781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366348761700892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490081317706659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13986106496490816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17370220410348605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4275894050428304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Donnie-Fucking-Baker,2020/01/01,"Really unhappy with myself and my place of work, need advice. Hey everyone.

So this text is going to be a huge mess. I just want to write my feelings down for a bit so yeah, let‘s go:

I‘m currently 17 years old and I‘m doing an apprenticeship in a small towns community office. Before I started working I was so excited to finally leave school but after like one week of working I had a kind of breakdown and everything just got up to me. I realized that I won‘t have 14 weeks of holidays anymore, I have to work on wednesday afternoons etc. I think everyone who initially started working had that moment. The problem is that these thoughts just never stopped. Every evening I‘m afraid of the next day for no reason at all. My colleagues are mostly nice and I enjoy doing the work that I do. I somehow just can‘t get myself to actually enjoy it. I‘m pretty sad while sitting in the bus, driving to work because I think about the long day that awaits me. Once I‘m actually working, these thoughts kinda disappear because I just function somehow and do the shit that I have to do. This has been going for the past 4 months now and it‘s slowly starting to affect my mental health. I wouldn‘t say I‘m depressed, I still enjoy live and for gods sake I shouldn‘t complain. I live in a nice skiing town in switzerland and I get to do what I love most every weekend, meeting friends, skiing and just having fun but under the week, it‘s just completely different. 

Now for the actual problem. I have 2 weeks of holidays since christmas and I felt like the time went by way too quick. I did fun stuff everyday and we had an amazing new years party with my closest friends and today I had a pretty bad hangover and just thought about life the whole day. I want to enjoy the last 4 days of my holidays as much as possible but when I think about it, 4 days are nothing and it‘ll go by so quick and then life‘s back to ""shit"". I just don‘t know if its just me or if time actually goes by this fast when youre not only working all day. 
Please just talk to me because I want to get shit together and not be a kinda depressed prick when I‘m not skiing or doing stuff with friends.
Oh and I don‘t really want to quit my apprenticeship because I‘d have to wait half a year before being able to do something else.

I know that I complain about unnecessary shit while other people are actually depressed. I just have this small problem that I cant really solve so I‘d enjoy talking to other people that were in the same situation as me.",3.950185185185184,5.864158946502059,4.7847139917695465,82.39904629629633,72.7037037037037,7.493744855967081,28.199382716049385,8.238735603445708,2.029381234567901,1992,78,369,32,40,644,230,486,0.095,0.685,0.22,0.9973,4,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,1,1,0,10,34,35,5,1,23,1,41,9,5,2,3,79,77,38,0,12,22,0,2,2,3,4,3,1,0,0,27,21,0,2,12,7,0,7,12,17,0,2,14,3,49,18,54,55,9,75,0,4,0,1,15,17,5,10,51,265,76,10,0.06357802335234564,0.0,0.31021489775881234,0.0,0.0,0.06212770859552176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305231524102617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488875755207801,0.053084993843399035,0.1550262917028483,0.0,0.10820043026032083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941073493708119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666034786242075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460153923017297,0.0,0.1642789750547552,0.0,0.0,0.06642550251072296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05311128035711581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090630212934321,0.041992684805605335,0.0,0.10713445354402726,0.12150305177900125,0.0571398278544769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03214695891280372,0.0,0.06104487278372065,0.06964661691326456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147360669389749,0.0,0.0996506793463722,0.0,0.14453142330904453,0.0,0.050849153237835766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758046578113831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620672767164107,0.06988163785099152,0.05182457467790053,0.0,0.06731994678826117,0.0,0.06501283642064437,0.08981407623857936,0.06212202151990207,0.0,0.11228111884701124,0.05626454998310704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057381648327251664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407169382848228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05074737167011823,0.0,0.04673716254509967,0.04714229872155555,0.04903529107014274,0.06140405113343516,0.06761594911216869,0.0,0.0,0.06100482811534769,0.0,0.06671444053360097,0.06770851990803436,0.04308211403572652,0.04835395169491489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060692417293108175,0.08815399234563312,0.0,0.06642550251072296,0.06978957751878677,0.0,0.07167466855622298,0.0,0.1293634129226352,0.0,0.18250674584576695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06762305380880307,0.0,0.0,0.12218912930352988,0.0653687969110478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05055979600478931,0.0,0.06434435390124503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610477093217494,0.0525923979142254,0.0714643620627918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048945468517822464,0.0,0.0,0.1350025564892417,0.0,0.050773491576264033,0.0531540743579957,0.0,0.0,0.14556325165923498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220321375578813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222146905883504,0.0,0.15142154642291786,0.07414571339534577,0.0,0.0602645321548789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14999986169199278,0.050465275623696064,0.2039938214640052,0.0,0.0,0.05893746460858373,0.0,0.07098259257078465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4165700239000005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282648765460452
mentalhealth,angelface19,2020/01/01,"why is mental health support so awful? **TRIGGER WARNING: self harm and suicide mentioned.** 

For a while now, around the internet we see all of this “speak out” and “don’t be afraid to say something”, and as a whole and I absolutely support and repost about this, because there shouldn't be a stigma about mental health.

But why is it that when people do reach out, nothing happens? I'm from the UK, and in every severe example of mental health suffering I've come across, going to the doctors accomplishes nothing.  I have so many examples.

My friend, (17M) has attempted to take his own life on 2 occasions by overdose, waking up in comas. And yet he cannot afford to pay for his antidepressants because they're too expensive. Admitted to CAHMS that did absolutely nothing, with a super long waiting list, but can't afford private counselling/therapy. 

Then we have my best friend (17F) who had to go to her GP **FOUR** times before they listened to her, after describing the extent her depression and self harm effected her, and prescribed her anti-depressants, which has only made her feel worse, having only received school counselling prior. 

Then we have a family member of mine (22F) who has gone to hospital twice now due to self harm and overdose. Coming out of hospital with nothing but a few numbers and waiting lists to refer herself on to. 

The one that hurts the most is a dear friend of mine (19F) suffering with severe anxiety and depression, and unfortunately taking her own life. She spent a week in a ward, and due to the demand for facilities, got allowed home and took her own life some time after. They knew she was suffering, but let her home.

And me stressing that none of my close family and friends aren't getting the help they need, has only worsened my mental state, as well as grieving over the loss of my friend. It's an epidemic. And nothing is changing.  I'm not attacking our NHS, because it helps so many people and this country should be so grateful for the services we can get, but how can I go on, telling people to speak out when I know they'd only be worse off for it. Imagine feeling like that was your last hope, to be disregarded or completely unheard.

I just feel like a hypocrite giving out advice I know I wouldn't take, knowing that the funding isn't there and unless you're dying, no one takes you seriously.",5.385183656036446,6.954844974943054,5.753478787015947,78.2475985905467,68.49886104783599,8.403217539863325,31.030822892938488,8.841846274778883,2.6612351366742604,1860,76,324,32,32,595,233,439,0.18,0.6890000000000001,0.131,-0.9795,3,0,1,0,0,1,66.0,5,2,4,6,18,29,1,2,22,1,34,9,1,5,1,71,70,40,3,5,9,0,3,2,5,3,8,4,2,3,16,36,0,3,11,0,4,8,10,15,1,4,10,8,40,14,56,50,11,44,0,8,1,0,47,17,0,4,20,227,56,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071809947712986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05536204796594222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442370779202898,0.0,0.08233012710257404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13234631897002092,0.0,0.061580645444641174,0.0,0.0759467472532216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655675234956767,0.12467888330058867,0.07587746623661168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18699380940568788,0.0,0.07510754356456223,0.0,0.0,0.07407268592135155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060973960849576375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644600904777313,0.0,0.1097757452999028,0.10340078336973674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795603527127851,0.0,0.07561957795525161,0.06942289029046997,0.12338682452080148,0.0,0.05788005961095901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399562267193938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307744262516933,0.0,0.0,0.09701476219666806,0.0,0.14518391306729955,0.07187869550787399,0.0,0.0,0.07747245676351787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931624541342087,0.058990352457581025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400215358364108,0.15334898682415438,0.07071162605024033,0.0,0.0,0.06404424262040326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847724943028449,0.0,0.14674151122883672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917235172685844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053660658761392685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3471997922322646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807814564347764,0.22015938738933655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505145515809508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057550692987698715,0.0,0.07324124006575525,0.05766868277969786,0.0,0.2264897909245915,0.16351262692272328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055713152631024165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289838666537792,0.0,0.0,0.07915988434102532,0.16424685161699898,0.0,0.0,0.2176497731341981,0.0,0.06325365128905959,0.0,0.08276020029281952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439783237189559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040456523013803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058050005726636586,0.0,0.06506837638697413,0.0,0.13060344055481765,0.08079734720696198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475002835356543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustCallMeMintyBoi,2020/01/01,"I'm just scared and unhappy with myself I'm a 17 year old in highschool. I graduate this year and I dont know what I want from life or what career I want. I fell as if nothing makes me happy anymore I have not intrest really . I had my first ""real girlfriend"" and I'm now with a girl but  were not like dating but we are? I know this is not like important compared to all the people on this sub here with real problems I was just wondering if anyone had any helpful advise or anything.",1.9019031903190324,3.6849173861386175,3.85795379537954,87.39097909790979,78.10891089108911,6.469086908690867,24.093509350935093,7.3871296695380915,1.1033357535753572,380,13,78,5,9,129,68,101,0.191,0.7709999999999999,0.038,-0.879,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,0,1,4,5,0,1,3,0,8,1,0,1,1,28,17,10,0,5,11,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,4,0,13,3,8,13,1,9,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,5,8,55,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398694352291938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20397926612040207,0.14381621995630248,0.0,0.16925709334167854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24105539743179324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17495128061555018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21895015667979853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786295086903827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22607266917396346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14527784815193331,0.20096969177272075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729297962143086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973554820501366,0.0,0.21582653337402904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259259628697765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19680795720894464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4682176784499789,0.13176385793262482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059215349034793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426307550256781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22305115783132148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649023192477577
mentalhealth,Killjoys13,2020/01/01,"Whenever I [19M] see my ex-girlfriend [19F] or even anything related to her, I lose my mind and get very depressed out of nowhere which lasts for atleast a day and ruins whatever plans I had for the week. How should I overcome this? A little background - I have had a very rough childhood and by that I mean my parents treated me like shit and they still do. They never cared about the life I was living outside academics which is quite true for every student here, coz its India. I had many friends till 8th grade but after that everybody's lifestyle changed and they started getting into relationships, partied with everyone, all the usual teen stuff. But my parents didn't allow me any of this shit coz they're conservative as hell. They just wanted me to score better in exams, get a job, add to the population and die. So, all of this made me  isolated from everyone and I lost many of my friends and was very lonely most of the times.

But a  year and half years back, I met this girl, who I thought was an angel coz of her nature and beauty, and within a week we were dating. I  finally got to know what others feel by not being alone. Moreover she was a perfect 10, so yeah I was definitely happy and at peace.

But  then after 9 or 10 months, I got to know that she was just playing with me. To be concise, she, basically, sent the same nudes to me and four others and sucked  each of us off on the same day without any of us getting to know about  others and then explained herself the next day by saying that it's *""modern multiple dating.""* And she had been doing all that long before hooking up with me.

Obviously, it broke me like hell, I was a little depressed and even cried at night thinking about my fucking fate. It wouldn't have been that upsetting if I didn't have such isolated and prison like teenage years.

But hopefully I got over it with much pain, learnt about game, developed my communication skills and completely changed myself. I am no longer a  people pleaser nor am I lonely or get upset about my life. But, as the title says, there's this one thing for which I don't have any  solution, whenever her name pops up in any conversation or situation or just when I thinking about something, I feel like I am going back to the old me. It doesn't happen that often, but when it does, it ruins my day and week and messes with my mind badly. 

I  just don't know why it happens, but if anyone has a solution or has experienced anything like this, then pls tell me what to do.",5.8430963821368005,5.9844372581967225,6.182184850197853,80.71114754098363,66.78688524590164,8.94414923685698,30.76201243640475,8.641336200584522,2.236646184284907,1954,68,385,27,29,629,242,488,0.177,0.698,0.125,-0.9854,3,5,1,0,0,0,58.0,3,0,4,7,24,35,6,2,21,1,36,7,3,6,7,89,69,49,1,6,22,2,3,5,2,2,3,2,0,1,33,31,0,1,11,2,0,2,11,20,0,3,24,7,60,15,55,41,8,52,3,9,1,2,31,14,6,11,41,278,93,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375406017261784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199699530238852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05654424623939861,0.0,0.13309367700784627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243638137549352,0.0675207577507723,0.0,0.0,0.06881205507613437,0.0,0.0,0.07152049176924236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244952870495377,0.0,0.17109360972399038,0.0,0.08478775024216009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882885298486735,0.2086106889336656,0.0,0.13930165036770342,0.0,0.08392741562028512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707674563840548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682408314591472,0.0,0.06813412756387778,0.1545442041370723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177780076903435,0.0577715640099136,0.0,0.08858609577377073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495563987077216,0.07476044942712874,0.21124894540804254,0.0,0.045958709392587636,0.0,0.1940307293469191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430212457221401,0.08608466817733856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803194042279876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024824600632305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177770055111374,0.0659175842176056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142378296624516,0.1975382147734368,0.16210041455142085,0.0714072440887872,0.07156495224568983,0.0,0.09046974336032486,0.08827613234397387,0.0,0.0,0.07651852664478652,0.0,0.16397335363610754,0.0,0.08808811858943467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633056957260657,0.0,0.06454745005970333,0.0,0.05944671745607725,0.0,0.062369791722174536,0.0,0.08600321464780566,0.0758884156033138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485655270180863,0.0,0.05479772671310491,0.0,0.086048432406743,0.0,0.1795869739299082,0.0,0.0,0.05606315392530719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601225137298185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682113941025428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861773133246185,0.0,0.0,0.06444071098884557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16601809538214374,0.0,0.09089815274143173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06225554311147177,0.0,0.0,0.05723824036685855,0.0,0.06458067292981509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925736290155006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068152184572689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053724593143326664,0.1036329091562752,0.0,0.06419954626242266,0.047154331101498866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945466372976951,0.0,0.08906382706612535,0.20017179718816686,0.04769758641129519,0.0,0.1946004379649861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297009539035956,0.0,0.0,0.07795312226584139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15622753094349334
mentalhealth,shakyjerky,2020/01/01,"Physical pain with anxiety and depression When ever I get depressed I obviously start crying but my body also starts to hurt really badly. Yesterday on New Year’s Eve I had an argument with someone and in turn my back started to hurt really bad and I don’t know what to do. My muscles feel super tense, anyone have any advice for calming physical pain caused by anxiety and depression ?",6.18,7.623878111111113,7.562111111111111,66.49400000000001,66.5,11.871111111111116,33.84444444444444,11.602472056035307,4.785457777777777,312,14,49,11,5,107,54,72,0.44299999999999995,0.47200000000000003,0.084,-0.9891,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,11,0,0,1,0,4,3,1,1,2,12,11,7,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,9,0,0,1,1,7,2,9,10,0,12,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,0,10,31,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15728464521422614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287167045268063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094558115635834,0.0,0.2462622761934438,0.0,0.0,0.11254439574685797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237654686611738,0.2687835946829121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17878617759040033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16534646984513088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17680295076782876,0.0,0.0,0.41589430693258106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559419909545812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138434752575274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409302977512642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3446141218731442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845737968496803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15545260907843467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425377283898954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20622546993389024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637776080529795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34177711814007683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750742476498506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365058774573101
mentalhealth,paideusa,2020/01/01,"how can i help a homeless teen without enabling? My teenaged son has a friend who is about 17 1/2. He is basically homeless and tries to find friends houses to crash at each night. He has a sibling in the area (who is a young adult) but his parents live far away and apparently living with them is not an option. He asked me to take him in and my heart aches for him but i don't know what to do. He has some mental health issues (bipolar, odd, depression, anxiety) and smokes pot and vapes. I have younger children living in the house who adore him, and my older teen has some similar issues. So far he has been respectful when he's here and better behaved than my son, tbh.

When I talked with him I got mixed messages. He really wants a family and a mom, but he also doesn't want to give up his lifestyle of hanging out with friends all day and smoking pot. He is almost 18 so I realize I can't exert as much control as I would with a younger child. I told him my criteria for him staying here would be that he'd have to be in counseling for his mental health issues and he'd have to be either employed or in school. (In addition to following house rules.) I don't think he's able to abide by that. My daughter is making me feel bad for setting these boundaries because the effect is him probably being on the street. She thinks I should just let him crash here and live his life as long as he is staying out of trouble (which he does) and follows my house rules while he's here (which he also has so far.) He does want to get a job and has asked for help with that, and I would definitely never give him money directly but I would be giving him food and shelter.

Meanwhile other adults think I'm crazy for even considering taking him in. I feel sad that it is so easy for everyone to turn their backs and justify it in one way or another.

I know the boundaries I've set are reasonable, but they also seem elitist. How is a kid who has never had guidance or support supposed to suddenly jump through hoops? Especially when he is just coming to terms with his mental health issues (recently diagnosed.) He has no support and no stability.

How do I help him without enabling him? I also worry about my ability as a caregiver. I've had some life events this year and my own kids have needs that I am struggling with.

Even just writing this out has helped me so thank you already, just for providing this forum.",4.919480773116035,5.533709807933196,5.487903562529464,83.2380429658563,68.87473903966597,8.602357061081554,29.85662334163917,8.654491914285503,2.1405347296114217,1894,69,382,29,31,611,230,479,0.095,0.794,0.111,0.9032,4,0,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,1,3,5,28,14,0,1,16,0,50,9,1,7,3,82,81,47,0,9,16,5,2,0,3,5,7,0,0,6,19,31,1,1,12,0,1,5,11,5,0,1,5,2,55,9,57,63,9,47,0,2,0,0,73,20,0,9,17,262,74,3,0.07315036822110756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324952722464204,0.0,0.08072325033112862,0.2339932921516784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670453917793182,0.055959831467784736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13677143942575876,0.0,0.0687271789066037,0.05624811785927175,0.061077501971702974,0.04459178551041648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469555618994963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301256504622697,0.0,0.0,0.08204435806203347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04717593592364023,0.0,0.06300430496055537,0.07424608394126983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12802876036384742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663025662497604,0.0,0.0,0.06989831162542998,0.0,0.0,0.06895965694280712,0.0,0.07397404819046327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06685811132343493,0.0,0.08845371561522088,0.0,0.16954737909088105,0.0,0.038218048225420916,0.2105174961943855,0.0,0.0,0.05850503187973018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332662622608182,0.0,0.08668353854730339,0.19612459950009592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3376228142828811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30539991744209005,0.07259045317246664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040305865384413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480120759516051,0.10333653677593167,0.0,0.0,0.2583724612644407,0.06473577396783514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488284388095076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22115509804995975,0.0,0.0,0.08567282716228765,0.0,0.0,0.05377393743175665,0.0542400711510011,0.11283614709854906,0.0,0.0,0.0686466652336673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04956858265303197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122482714710556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07886846918426246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04686199900467112,0.07521076170792165,0.07222716369216657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740320779515345,0.0,0.06659334789280318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559371191150158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647264751242774,0.0,0.0,0.16602034197246093,0.0,0.0,0.10999994645324553,0.05879549508942576,0.0,0.06734703099607565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406154068210227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989831162542998,0.0,0.04966429830585256,0.07956659496754602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943794731249292,0.058063357424540864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102868917634065,0.0,0.0,0.07428774973190706,0.0,0.20785569119071567,0.0,0.0,0.04710643880536308
mentalhealth,The-Pink-Panther,2020/01/01,What do normal functioning people do everyday? Like what do their daily to do lists look like? What do they do for fun? Why do they leave their houses so much?,1.4369354838709685,4.090559064516132,2.277661290322584,92.53649193548388,87.38709677419355,5.680645161290323,14.201612903225806,7.1686216300943375,-0.13113548387096774,125,2,25,2,4,39,20,31,0.032,0.721,0.247,0.8426,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,8,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,2,8,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,3,18,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4390238638191548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4028743264170471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3717674889763871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31950812184068816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796972335439277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3727904893930968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637775427758756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34332482406955184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WhothefuxamI,2020/01/01,I feel like the worst person on the planet I always make everything wrong and I feel like everybody hates me... I just bring pain and suffering to this world. Everyone would be better off if I didn't exist. I know I sound like whiny sick person and I shouldn't post it but I don't know what to do about the way I feel right now.,1.0416149068323008,3.0979024782608704,2.4484886128364387,95.06478260869568,82.18840579710145,6.2616977225672885,15.65424430641822,7.447530270364453,-0.1493494824016559,257,4,59,4,7,83,46,69,0.195,0.696,0.109,-0.6908,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,9,1,0,3,0,6,2,0,1,0,14,14,5,0,3,3,0,3,3,0,2,2,1,0,2,3,3,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,4,11,4,5,10,1,8,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,4,36,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18389763869187012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954649744798456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21118408284387616,0.19862912021754095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352471860493723,0.3157785134166214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21820116109605736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429221222201445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239222870619793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14752558147531306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351697286797461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3859540042736186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116660428499069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887409362044136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542708256313194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569988333309804,0.2416392330038889,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sandy_Pace,2020/01/01,A few things to accept this new year's for a better mental health “What do you struggle to accept?” by Sandy Pace https://link.medium.com/EQuAEEz3O2,5.708750000000002,9.402219041666667,2.9750000000000014,84.42000000000002,87.75,4.066666666666666,14.333333333333336,5.985473137389443,-0.4372166666666666,123,2,18,1,4,33,21,24,0.084,0.62,0.29600000000000004,0.7003,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,0,4,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669377700730577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4410102081609879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4181129962027041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4007047459540025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4337346241742706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756354426322957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671764898437972
mentalhealth,Thorm01,2020/01/01,"Diagnose me Hey everyone!   


I'm feeling good nowadays but couple of years ago for almost whole year i felt super off. I didn't get any help for it, because i was stupid af. I'm curious what could it been? Anyone else had similar experiences or/and knows what i'm talking about here?  


Symptoms:  


I could be at the beach or just hanging with a friend when suddenly like snap: I was feeling this overwhelming sense of ""dark cloud over me"". It felt like you had just heard some really awful news. It felt like death. No physical symptoms, i probably looked normal but inside i was feeling this deep sense of despair and it was paralyzing. I couldn't enjoy anything when this happened and it lasted for hours. This went on for almost a year. Slowly it faded.  


Thanks!",1.984473684210528,4.794697944444444,3.0991228070175474,86.34236842105267,86.91666666666669,6.087134502923977,22.856725146198826,7.475848149327749,1.376644444444445,600,22,109,11,19,192,92,144,0.155,0.6459999999999999,0.19899999999999998,0.657,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,1,6,11,1,1,3,1,12,3,0,0,0,23,28,7,1,4,5,0,6,3,1,0,3,1,0,0,13,3,0,0,7,1,0,2,3,3,0,0,13,8,11,8,13,11,2,17,0,2,1,0,6,5,0,4,13,65,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284871912961386,0.0,0.29028791795174685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856925372064494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135064498393034,0.14851581762926808,0.11927942191427812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835863563918675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314575292186023,0.16038162456540433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711863639258574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108501642805848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13850352431532442,0.0,0.14178644416371738,0.0,0.0,0.21986939621278265,0.0,0.4175169214994398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198605992255928,0.0,0.07572907340079495,0.0,0.0,0.12157506536423225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281765737841256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715523738706508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274406580603702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965934176611557,0.11815153831835623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21244204467593145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171937336656788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14201775061157607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15627789406290565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285706432209187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30131185263847426,0.0,0.11650329019946085,0.0,0.13344816102448298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13436776184595106,0.0,0.16182867989150435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28002426556952525
mentalhealth,podiumx3,2020/01/01,"⏩ A way to reduce Depression Im someone who is facing depression. It's a little bit complicated to explain, sometimes I just feel that I'm useless and have no purpose in life,I  feel like everyone is judging me  and I'm basically living in a society that makes me feel like an anomaly. 

I need some advice and tips from the chat on how to change myself",4.244647887323944,5.3037295211267645,6.235323943661975,75.65016901408453,70.69014084507046,9.060281690140846,32.50985915492957,9.3871,3.1143104225352114,280,13,52,6,5,98,51,71,0.174,0.7559999999999999,0.07,-0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,5,0,3,1,1,2,0,12,11,4,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,5,2,7,11,2,5,0,3,0,0,3,4,0,1,2,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22292551870269306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24905834190864246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413307746376903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3929752285404351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217987524842872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3460474071403701,0.32595153768828183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464190200128361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611346208069528,0.22290511244096087,0.2286457026413408,0.20144253848509813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15227822061089327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16915514241414645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19329339507759544,0.0,0.2256259204707217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18107858794743525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,105tin5p4c3,2020/01/01,"I'm just not necessarily happy to be alive I can't really understand why I should be happy that I'm alive. I'm not exactly living for the sake of living and if my family is still going to be disappointed in me, then what's the point? I don't get it. I have a responsibility to fulfill, but if I can't do that? Why should I be happy? I feel like my brain isn't functioning properly. Why are my parents celebrating that we are alive if I am useless? 

It's like, ""wow, we are alive"" but at the end of the day, I still can't meet anyone's expectations.",1.609487179487182,3.1293120427350485,4.807188034188034,81.43642307692309,78.14529914529916,8.44068376068376,21.956410256410265,9.120678840339163,1.5476502564102566,427,12,96,11,10,157,62,117,0.113,0.6829999999999999,0.204,0.9025,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,2,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,5,0,18,1,1,0,1,17,25,7,0,6,8,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,2,0,0,0,1,15,6,8,19,0,9,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,3,7,64,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179590995356575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19445079323207629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233649033512293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542783726068163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642084186354662,0.0,0.08807440474576464,0.12443954382621784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100574945776244,0.0,0.0989947378034274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5562773150774197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701983718525171,0.0,0.3076214062257775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934145413575248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16466343565176586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158893607948092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782126333985807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18133527083820453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4715312215767825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skateclimb,2020/01/01,"How do I support my depressed partner while not losing my own quality of life? My partner and I (33) got into a fight last night (Happy New Year!).  He is not clinically diagnosed with depression, anxiety or any other mental health condition and is not on meds.

We have been together for less than a year, but the perpetual dark cloud over his head is his deep rooted unhappiness for his job.  I am starting to worry and wonder if it's really his job or if it's something deeper than that.  

I'm trying to be as supportive as I can, but my resources and patience are running thin.  I'm putting my own needs aside for him, but it's beginning to take a toll on me and this kind of came out last night.

I'm a very active and overall happy person, and yesterday it was a hassle and a minor fight to get him outside on a hike with me. I am happy to go and do sports and activities alone, so when I say I'll just go on my own, he insists he wants to come too. But in a way that isn't without tension.  Last night I knew he would want to go straight home after work- but it was NYE. As a single person I would go find a party and welcome the new year, but I know he doesn't like parties.  So I thought we would drive down to see the fireworks after he was done work (11:00pm), and I also did not want to sit at home.  He came with me, but grudgingly and was grumpy the entire time.

I've been putting up with this because I know he's dealing with a lot of his own issues. But it's starting to suck the fun and zest out of my life.  He sleeps until 12pm everyday, I see him enough for breakfast and then he goes to the gym and goes to work, then I don't see him until 10:30pm or 11pm at night.

I know that someone who is depressed and dealing with mental health can have extreme difficulty just getting out of bed in the morning.  I said some hurtful things last night, but I don't want to spend my life like this.  I'm someone who's out and about  getting things done and looking for my next adventure. I have a positive outlook on life, and I love living.  

I'm not sure how to deal with this, I love him and when we have good times they're great- but I'm not sure how fair it is for me to feel like I'm in a relationship alone.

Help.",4.32651440833844,4.186962384120172,5.384834457388107,86.09872317596567,70.00858369098712,8.37388105456775,28.87461679950951,7.957251820313856,1.6159904353157568,1725,57,386,20,28,572,207,466,0.121,0.736,0.14300000000000002,0.9520000000000001,2,2,1,0,2,1,49.0,3,0,0,4,12,27,3,1,20,0,33,13,2,4,2,87,77,52,0,10,24,0,2,3,2,3,8,2,3,4,19,39,1,0,8,2,1,11,11,9,0,0,15,8,46,18,62,58,9,65,0,5,4,2,41,21,1,8,34,245,65,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796259541006682,0.0,0.05712359519395565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04857574232008008,0.0,0.054644758924381635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04354386539972372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339678509266856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061531751183708475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209276414754532,0.1845710556374588,0.0725012790716809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619806723023118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738076411164675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036117818120624125,0.05103054427563308,0.0,0.0,0.06528692598925727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11195973846208528,0.0,0.16238424523919376,0.05991319630375709,0.05713014637600509,0.07875327475067782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22811988282624795,0.0,0.0,0.07330913506623978,0.15185629086787758,0.0,0.0,0.047878903392486835,0.0,0.14330286217268448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646869793773467,0.0,0.0,0.07455573232809141,0.14176911222846045,0.0,0.0,0.07438472033675393,0.11777034459400305,0.2329042156021301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20181619537049764,0.10469319418178367,0.0,0.06307515805610682,0.0,0.059984312479152375,0.0799133678181534,0.0,0.060728347899654415,0.12893909768365935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934408569962863,0.0,0.14397192534785927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0529654134822414,0.0,0.13797761441276496,0.07596801173979825,0.3351672417755565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474213454452268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361639804020138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04576072820732241,0.0,0.0,0.07669049773303029,0.0,0.0,0.06794753626346874,0.05680504713587457,0.0,0.0,0.17076452463907307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07148289983406272,0.0,0.12104703939305005,0.054991314561059525,0.0,0.0,0.10111890198434226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621188149726867,0.13464633428413922,0.0,0.053707457634972415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094911580673857,0.0,0.0,0.056708483562223265,0.08330434608451928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048497172648460124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058938314112406125,0.16852815650168335,0.05669885140077322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688572366939596,0.07746421188628859,0.15600853980760002,0.07254196570394991,0.0,0.15222826585954075,0.0,0.0,0.13799827080182067
mentalhealth,Marvellover13,2020/01/01,"Please help, I feel miserable and apathy I don't know if it's the right subreddit to share this and maybe get help, if this is not please tell me where to go and don't delete this.

It's exactly new year as I write it, and I'm alone at home, (not happy or joyful at all) the only one awake to face his feelings and emotions. Don't get me wrong I like being alone, I'm an introvert, but I feel like I don't experience happiness anymore, I can't recall my last real time I felt truly happy. I never do any new years resolutions usually, but I want for this year to sometimes feel true happiness.

I think the word I'm looking for to describe my feeling is apathy toward anything, like nothing really matter, like it's all just a game/movie someone else is watching.

The more depressing thing is that the last thing that made me happy was a dream and I rarely get those, half a dozen a year maybe.

If you're gonna tell me to start working out or something similar, please don't. Everytime I tried I dropped out of it after a week or 2, I'm not going to pay a gym cause I value money too much.",2.94528116092252,4.078179008810576,4.5885721689556895,85.94784400103654,73.8898678414097,7.984348276755638,24.80668566986267,8.4952907291091,1.4856293858512566,853,26,183,15,17,288,126,227,0.111,0.667,0.222,0.9762,0,2,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,3,15,0,1,12,0,13,1,1,2,5,40,35,15,0,4,12,0,6,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,14,8,0,0,8,2,2,2,10,3,0,3,3,8,22,12,17,30,4,24,0,2,2,0,7,7,0,6,18,106,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014343969896744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613039826351556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644158556826947,0.0,0.0,0.08002491018333648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989810267838553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375756316664708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123628878053189,0.1093883030197732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512493670174244,0.0,0.0,0.2458516929075058,0.06947233444864043,0.09337110460687192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524205650876101,0.0,0.11053392389383213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5175991823148534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036346120671372,0.0,0.0975453476895593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0534436834769236,0.15853641961384615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19003731206962124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166188069080185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201621534206003,0.0,0.0,0.19539271598380906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714867652929344,0.0,0.07500186474562842,0.1878409707553572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330985433720804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589619066890337,0.07395972300339605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202396685826398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068687558213948,0.06229807382537459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304728084423459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239595054394899,0.07486447677926363,0.09617846578293864,0.0,0.06883099403948463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699940241937226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921141973341238,0.06231110623519614,0.0,0.0,0.05670473903775754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602343451108489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071023796439363,0.0,0.057358022624933634,0.0,0.07800462010361763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707960144798538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063228870737695,0.0,0.2504921228012044
mentalhealth,wd_eyes,2020/01/01,"Hello, I was emitted to a mental health hospital on the 19th of November. None of you probably remember the post I made a couple of days before I was emitted. I made a post which entailed my desires to cut my cheeks off as well as my plan for how to do it and when I was going to do it. I did do it, but I did not succeed. None of my blades were sharp enough to get through the tough layers, so instead I lost my temper and slashed and slashed as hard as I could all over my face. Yes, there was a lot of blood, I even stained my favourite hoodie and my fingers were stained for a couple of days. It felt great to do it and I would love to do it again and hopefully succeed the next time round.

This was late at night on Monday the 18th November, after I did it, I plopped down on the couch and fell asleep. I woke up to a loud ""HOLY FUCK"" which came from roommate, he asked what happen and I skipped on the details, but he got the gist, he then convinced me to sign myself in voluntarily to the hospital since if I didn't I would somehow be forced to go in.

I called up my councillor and they sorted it out for me and got me a bed in the ward. I drove myself there with a scarf wrapped around my face for obvious reasons. They brought me in and had me see a doctor to check if I needed stitches. A really nice guy then introduced me to the ward and told me how things worked. 

I have been in here ever since. It's not all that bad and the therapists and physicists do a much better job with helping than any of my councillors ever did. The nursing staff are also very kind and help me with a lot of stuff. Before you ask, yes I still want to cut them off, but there's nothing here I can do it properly with.

I have no one really to share all this with so I thought this would be the best place, especially since I have posted about stuff like this before. A bit of advice if you're like me and you want to do something really fucking stupid try and tell someone, anyone even Lifeline or some sort of service like that. It's too late for me now the damage is done, don't be a fucking idiot like me get help even if you have to go to a mental hospital, it's not that bad trust me.

TL:DR - I tried to cut my cheeks off and ended up in a mental hospital.",4.120960695499708,4.119341921610168,5.00758620689655,88.14974576271187,70.46186440677967,8.205260081823496,27.292811221507893,7.873277556716777,1.3447351548801865,1745,52,397,20,29,570,217,472,0.105,0.728,0.16699999999999998,0.9886,1,0,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,4,3,7,25,31,9,0,31,2,38,13,7,5,6,67,67,38,0,13,11,0,5,4,0,3,2,1,2,1,25,26,0,0,4,0,1,7,8,14,1,1,27,7,60,17,69,33,12,50,0,2,2,4,22,22,3,12,22,290,85,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175654314084893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06690693037620125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056895120104866664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05850056586010935,0.0,0.0,0.07447965491628948,0.15643110263486126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971368612820173,0.0,0.0,0.2135784502055652,0.0,0.0878013346529935,0.07399496000671194,0.09134059300765124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543139605212824,0.0956905573499956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679975462424499,0.1851476286535206,0.0,0.10791410407539713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563474961662411,0.0,0.08561841977991683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410242347970829,0.08644838772216605,0.0,0.1657799792325036,0.15135970079205846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803315925871703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320410414665191,0.08742309724246332,0.0,0.14264637082349202,0.0,0.13382920710725899,0.09224104072495397,0.0,0.08284157821043656,0.07398474965374237,0.0,0.07494747384571615,0.0,0.0,0.08893206253727115,0.0,0.0,0.16823680888220474,0.0,0.0,0.08309829751714289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302467736107341,0.0,0.0,0.08712430104803708,0.0,0.0,0.18875569794395544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634981185433487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133031276427353,0.14225811001524055,0.07551099683238807,0.158331834102082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529441525696229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061503456867790185,0.06203659311306805,0.0,0.0,0.08897875658972773,0.07851400540781578,0.0,0.08027889607330546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056693620195977026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874121963362084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24038404451442166,0.0,0.09020510166023872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16079396853800726,0.08602163166063874,0.0,0.0,0.09477622062192477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667023274683814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076258442242788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07088914667763284,0.0644094623620942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681503709547038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915529887232686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312696337523379,0.0,0.0,0.09714160074311813,0.05558335831699271,0.0,0.0,0.0664207241955789,0.048785778141128465,0.0,0.0,0.07994556470114808,0.0,0.11360618822452795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903244912054646,0.0986956580306484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522495033830838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060909171160993876,0.0,0.0,0.17829980677112306,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nocturnal-spider,2020/01/01,"Can't stop my thoughts Ok so i don't know what to do ...
I have some health anxiety issues. Also BDD tendencies. This is going to sound really stupid but I've been worrying about vaginal prolapse for months now. I'm 21 years old. I feel my cervix several times a day. When I go for walks, I think about it to the point where i'm literally on the verge of tears and I check my cervix as soon as I get home.
Also worry about ALS. My left calf is 1 cm shorter in circumference than my right. It has been so since summer, but I still can't stop worrying.
I often lose sleep because I can't stop worrying and can't put my mind to rest. This is ruining my life. I had BDD in 2018, in 2019 it changed to health anxiety but the other day I looked at myself in the mirror and for the first time in months I literally saw a monster again.
I can't stop thinking. I try to dull my mind by watching mindless YouTube videos but as soon as I put my phone down, the thoughts are there. I can't focus on other people's conversations because I analyse my body so much.
I try to work out, go for runs, dance, blast music, drink alcohol, I also went for a drive in an attempt to think about something else ... nothing works. I can't think about anything else. I've tried meditation, yoga ... I'm in CBT, it doesn't work. Ahhhhhh idk what to do ):",1.7140659340659354,3.5661017692307686,3.494441025641027,89.45889230769232,78.92673992673994,6.858842490842491,23.007912087912093,7.839951260653429,1.004560263736264,1025,33,227,17,25,343,146,273,0.14300000000000002,0.8140000000000001,0.043,-0.9816,0,0,3,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,0,6,20,5,1,0,10,1,20,7,2,0,0,24,38,18,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,10,4,2,4,8,4,1,10,9,4,0,1,7,5,32,1,38,31,3,47,0,3,3,0,2,17,0,2,20,136,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574027268149573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23737470892439316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513826723717982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142188656560392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062980676206997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990367572787932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466886779471267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762045675338926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692674348980697,0.0,0.0,0.16530882383861578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05002869383049904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841611009828133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051693778568017434,0.0,0.1686952336275549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21034415358900355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924817430454944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327107505480376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054376637521203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750216010744018,0.0,0.0698865627382777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308743328930195,0.11069221839996814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19980900869003526,0.0,0.1579511596647921,0.0,0.07273469325099315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493874292256554,0.0,0.10382432529875232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859481024252186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353337818268276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19893064366724708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338559691781442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449701805337531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177774007440214,0.0,0.0818469012947478,0.0,0.0990147327828882,0.0,0.0,0.0761713686669501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079016228927416,0.3308840402742556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535954273256221,0.0,0.15709981994213165,0.1153892411522097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20152797109489995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172140917112796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21609565248131246,0.4019268029918037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371622648988598
mentalhealth,colacolabobola,2020/01/01,"Will medication increase my productivity? I am diagnosed with mdd and bpd, I took medication maybe 5 years ago but stopped as I was too irresponsible and young to remember to take them daily. Now I am suffering, trying hard to pull myself out of the mental funks I get into. Some days are good but more often than not I literally cannot do anything except melt into my couch and stare at my phone. I can barely pet my dog during these times. Even if I really want to clean up my room or do the dishes, I cannot get myself to do it then I get worse. Does medication help with actually wanting to do things? Will I become more productive/proactive if I am on the correct medication?",3.7033492822966534,5.580997571428572,5.716431989063565,75.61385509227615,73.28571428571428,8.746138072453864,25.62474367737525,9.339509955726095,2.2854721804511278,539,18,102,13,11,187,88,133,0.12,0.772,0.107,-0.4127,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,14,6,0,0,1,22,21,10,0,4,7,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,4,0,3,8,1,1,1,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,2,2,20,1,18,17,4,18,0,1,1,0,3,7,0,5,8,75,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.15661738364468727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422667859420286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320715303493252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772511928530863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202134498259196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350428943770187,0.0,0.0,0.16289635831097934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044793822955606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600368444560128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25155188855208904,0.0,0.0,0.1346133698276364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143769622924019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075746400949458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16123613859716793,0.0,0.0,0.646716637445548,0.16173854198488913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281550993412712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18180654799690216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341787921235959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206702747165116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662398685424726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358438073367817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17831290766014488,0.10896377159087586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893250941120985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635554172991152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033518123388503
mentalhealth,State_Electrician,2020/01/01,"Ladies and gentlemen, I have some bad news: Kawaii Shelter has been disconnected. [This is what happened when I got to the Kawaii Shelter website—or where it used to be.](https://photos.app.goo.gl/9mnCmMr7t3JMASzM9)

So sad. We've lost a resource.",7.531315789473684,11.71691581578948,4.7634736842105285,74.4473157894737,75.05263157894737,6.197894736842105,28.65263157894737,7.554174236665415,2.072298947368421,203,8,30,3,5,56,34,38,0.24,0.76,0.0,-0.8576,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,8,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,2,0,2,5,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4145680032995012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3971071747595433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4390652167092776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5420030986607992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.428828216087614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cookie5992,2020/01/01,"Have you tried stitching for mental health? Have you tried stitching for mental health?

Starting 2019 I was depressed, struggling with anxiety insomnia and having several panic attacks a day. I was at my lowest. and I thought that I did not have the drive to get out of there, of that unhealthy mental space.
For the first couple weeks of 2019, I was suicidal. I felt like I was not worth being alive. I just wanted to stop existing, what the hell did it even mean? Disappear? Stop being in pain, constant pain? Stop hurting people around me? But I was too scared (or maybe too brave) to actually do it, to let go…

So, I stuck around, I decided to just do it one day at the time. Worse case scenario I will let go tomorrow. (Yes I procrastinated even that).

But how can I take my mind off it? I needed something to keep me somehow busy without giving me the energy/space to get into my dark side. At that time, I remember browsing through Pinterest for easy craft to learn and I stumbled upon embroidery.

I have never done embroidery before but I loved how from basic material ( thread and fabric) you can have a beautiful art piece. The process seemed soothing and it required enough focus to keep that weird mind of mine busy. I started stitching!

For the first weeks I keep stitching on a big piece of fabric random pattern all colorful (first image). I did not know what I was doing.I just stitched, stitched and stitched.
Then, I got more curious about other techniques, other designs and I started expressing what I was feeling/ seeing/ experiencing through fabric/thread art. At this point I was just doing it for myself, it became my healing therapy.

I found creating my own embroideries so helpful in aiding with my recovery that it led me to start an instagram page Khyoott

I am not 100% okay now. As we all know it mental heath is a constant struggle but I learnt to deal with my symptoms in a smoother way. I know that sometimes I just have to embrace that dark space and that it is not gonna be a constant state. The sun will rise tmr and if it doesn't it is okay it will rise the next week/month/year... There is always hope!

Have you tried art/ craft for mental health?",3.1992730171853765,5.7210011767554505,3.767108013937282,85.99571960077955,77.18401937046005,6.547428098978328,26.53806177286955,7.678348718463194,1.6450694974310522,1718,68,318,26,41,540,208,413,0.124,0.792,0.084,0.5057,1,0,1,0,0,0,62.0,1,4,0,4,20,17,2,4,16,3,39,9,0,3,3,66,68,21,1,4,17,0,2,1,0,4,8,0,0,0,28,17,0,7,12,3,1,6,8,11,0,4,17,5,50,6,47,42,8,51,1,2,2,1,10,19,1,6,25,230,78,3,0.0,0.0,0.07859555863032605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701584845463128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616129866873724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14339560028499376,0.0,0.0916260364548138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853372711780067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611058369433696,0.0,0.0,0.08911613306329941,0.0,0.10388345482065632,0.08303334788206752,0.06936910460526663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242052620673852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832194944043617,0.0,0.10639200581687733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04072351476785537,0.0,0.07733116482503649,0.0,0.0,0.2055222059383342,0.0,0.08830810645783656,0.0,0.0,0.08415779800501356,0.07726144122950428,0.09154563527315147,0.0,0.06441530747685095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256831207927472,0.0,0.0,0.053984358159754886,0.0,0.0,0.07999453185252052,0.0,0.0,0.08621988569037617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147633312071932,0.0,0.0,0.13278826398847876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471549991758572,0.0,0.039347844187015216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269062088880843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091339600711661,0.08773182366155717,0.0,0.0,0.4058275896178916,0.0,0.16264516406739907,0.0,0.06428637138721076,0.0,0.0,0.059719493323932574,0.062117521145855836,0.0,0.08565535264722199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054576083290589605,0.0,0.1714007750227339,0.09449650100175548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05583639215874588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613646521764263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123627831049153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063473052739135,0.0,0.06418006404982808,0.07332071862205103,0.0,0.09098743341291042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06200373464288295,0.0796562579118526,0.0,0.2280269026504264,0.0,0.0,0.2020054902823837,0.0,0.1683960830312291,0.0,0.08809784101697157,0.0,0.0,0.08371204377696423,0.06055616197072679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210466928576493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393987477582923,0.09392720669530943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640444048934152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04750466132239017,0.06392901433382392,0.19381332671638712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776378209230464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207728344385548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05186520957760943
mentalhealth,_klikked_,2020/01/01,"Almost every night is like this. Tonight is the night I want it to stop. After nights and nights of brushing it off, I decided that if I continued to, it probably wouldn't end well for me.

Every night I can feel everything I've ever thought I've done wrong weigh down on me. I've had anxiety, insecurities and guilt weigh down on me like a hundred dumbbells, and I've been sobbing them all out with a lump in my throat.

I recognize I have an ego, and a tendency to people-please. I want it to stop so badly, I had to distance myself from other people. It makes me feel like absolute shit when I don't get the response I wanted, and then the guilt follows of ""why would I have wanted them to say that that's horrible of me"" and then to insecure about my own talent (I am an artist)",5.41576388888889,4.951843437500003,6.3883333333333345,80.92555555555558,67.75,9.861111111111112,30.277777777777786,9.444778638647367,2.412569444444444,610,20,129,11,9,204,91,160,0.214,0.708,0.077,-0.9674,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,0,5,13,1,4,8,0,13,5,2,1,2,25,23,11,0,7,1,0,2,3,0,2,1,1,0,0,10,8,2,2,4,1,0,1,2,8,1,0,5,4,22,5,22,16,2,23,0,1,0,0,3,7,2,2,18,90,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13906704999911074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624189637164257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595799102526028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421212227315579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300538902001767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562381905754322,0.2340227454712092,0.0,0.12481530402133127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044258097107545,0.09921503733272584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255843723241187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035474893844667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927026726121439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6516416957235371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628106846363403,0.0,0.0,0.1524472099865654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973482782713962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104419902290593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425570850775385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23221777873962826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025424857941024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276572408990349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486871340866383,0.0,0.1253165092965936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865550978496516,0.1518421583795458,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Threadresearcher,2020/01/01,"Keep texting my ex and it's playing with my happiness a lot. I need help. Sometimes, I feel like I could never be happy again if I don't have her. Also, I couldn't imagine her being with another guy. I'm pretty sure it would destroy me more than anything. Here's the problem : I've been with her 2 months and after that I've suddenly stopped loving her!! Since it couldn't make sense that I could ever instantly stop loving her like that, I began to look for what could've go wrong. Here it is, she is very unsecure about everythings! She was always thinking that one day I would go away, that she wasn't pretty and lots of other things. So she was always texting me when I woke up, before going to school, in the bus, (not at school because she is there), she was texting me in the after school bus, in the evening and a late night call after that. So that made me feel like my liberty was going away. There was other things too but anyway... So I decided to break up with her. But now its been 2 months and we are in a weird situation. When I'm feeling down (basically every evening/night) I really want to text her and it's always making me feel good after. But it's like if I had my drug dose. I feel like if I don't need her anymore and that I don't love her. I feel free again! Until the evening come. Another thing is that she is still in love with me and I'm sure that I'm hurting her and I hate that. Any suggestions from you guys? I'm really lost...",1.2164356435643595,3.2367304290429075,2.8750726072607304,92.43894554455449,81.34323432343234,5.888184818481848,20.000990099009897,7.0316486544052195,0.3047100990099008,1132,30,249,14,30,373,140,303,0.1,0.75,0.15,0.8848,0,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,1,1,0,1,20,23,2,0,8,0,27,6,0,3,4,54,60,22,0,13,7,1,6,5,0,2,2,0,0,2,24,16,0,3,9,1,1,5,8,7,0,1,13,7,46,17,30,39,3,39,0,2,1,4,29,11,0,5,27,175,70,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898540577654724,0.21533603793164305,0.0,0.0,0.058662576882105966,0.18091095557261208,0.0,0.0,0.08555085220395661,0.0,0.0,0.07098804134533028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16209600817705855,0.0,0.0,0.05258582225926044,0.0,0.07340443393886842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808533719265206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430892276890194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20662470177378506,0.0,0.0,0.055633237220682766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003902141688972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139533086998887,0.07803085807887403,0.07268126290097801,0.0,0.07752865139133182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26170646266449554,0.18488136777279224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196103606775952,0.07235427224689013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17083013242076073,0.0,0.1836595733518336,0.0,0.08516798409655411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057821038179618964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234755162954146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667553588124787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973097132246471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107215199530895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244015581567223,0.0,0.09416750477590956,0.14667738288434176,0.3114270361999305,0.08162521999934884,0.11516397359034387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13771043543424633,0.0,0.0,0.12792754128268338,0.06653222681964598,0.0,0.0,0.1619061132156431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05845481734358687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17552329644419984,0.0,0.08254313676080527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052604071203334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619117611964904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135859236591527,0.09696451356802616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531744540403584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889065781510716,0.14424137613523108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16260587197597834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17193019496011153,0.0552745810718628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117695412945847,0.05088082788542801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255914746873535,0.0943163008400261,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lewpardaleo,2020/01/01,"I don't know what to do Hello.

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I can't do this anymore, i can't deal with this sadness and anxiety. I really wanna die, but like the stupid person i am i am anxious about it. I don't even know how someone can be such a fail.

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Nothing can make me smile anymore, i can't even feel love for another human being. I am in a relationship with the best person in the world, and i can't feel anything about that person. 

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I don't feel like i am living, i feel like am trapped in a bad dream. And noone gives a shit about it. My family, friends, noone. I am tried many times to express how bad i am feeling but all i got was like ""you are immature, suck it up."" I feel if they see me dead they will understand.

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I just hate me, really bad. I hate myself, the way i look and what i am.",1.18375,2.990249198830412,3.0693530701754383,92.09245065789473,80.40350877192982,6.146345029239766,22.383406432748536,7.1686216300943375,0.6378564327485376,627,20,141,8,16,210,86,171,0.314,0.541,0.145,-0.991,0,1,0,0,0,1,41.0,0,1,2,2,9,17,5,0,8,0,24,2,1,3,1,24,42,9,2,2,4,0,6,4,1,1,0,0,0,4,8,6,0,0,9,1,0,0,7,10,0,0,2,8,29,7,13,37,2,9,0,2,2,1,14,5,2,1,7,97,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3840482638497779,0.4306976065512527,0.0,0.09291837695316874,0.06778864419611022,0.10010738127728468,0.1757604188998158,0.0,0.0,0.07292088601284358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22196427013529546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299379659090128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135603350231558,0.0,0.0,0.09196622477322593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705600094060885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353637825147703,0.0,0.26883214089463753,0.12661018099912444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684621251476983,0.0,0.0,0.08500559104788474,0.0,0.0,0.07087185014236988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17497383341052095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739869103255153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17316719431322286,0.0,0.07824683521791613,0.0,0.07441253829346213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997662344837576,0.0,0.0591498147562288,0.08983959642904286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08502649033169958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23212016142125325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353541615560113,0.0,0.0,0.09513711774703043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061302754941813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095989292351582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508144281286956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051670908499455936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060162358584712035,0.0,0.0,0.09224917882378633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703368143549484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4306976065512527,0.0
mentalhealth,awobabobbobbobbob,2020/01/01,"Fed up of feeling like this  Ever since I can remember I've been a 'messy' person. I was never good with doing homework, handwriting all over the place, whenever I'd have a pen in school I would come home with ink all over my hands and face. I always feel interested in loads of things and can never actually finish what I was meant to cos I get interested in something else. So many things I want to do and I dont know which I want to do more or how to go about doing it. I'm 21 and have had around 7 jobs. Past years my anxiety and depression because of being a failure at fucking everything has skyrocketed and when I get angry at the fact that I cant do something I physically cant contain how angry I get and i end up punching myself really hard in the legs and sometimes my head. Always felt like maybe theres something wrong with me. Fuck knows what to do anymore, just smoke and drink all the time to get rid of this feeling and when I dont have it I just feel like shit. Ruined so many relationships with friends and family. Just wish I had something I was actually even just okay at. I'm so bad at everything it would be funny if it wasnt me.",3.5392436974789945,4.518191579831933,5.041428571428573,83.85357142857143,72.27731092436973,8.289075630252103,26.18487394957983,8.671277953709913,1.6952957983193273,908,29,193,16,17,306,127,238,0.15,0.73,0.12,-0.9111,1,0,6,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,16,15,3,0,7,1,27,9,5,3,7,48,49,20,0,6,6,0,7,3,1,2,0,0,2,1,12,17,2,1,9,1,0,2,7,7,0,0,10,7,24,8,28,35,4,26,0,2,0,2,3,14,3,2,13,131,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.21390367448621608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18238862962577013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384216918978721,0.0,0.10869176506639593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975654551626336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150975118552836,0.06680992288890898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440897159830874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09439659587303877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568960769785078,0.10736431454623252,0.0,0.0,0.09155506478840553,0.0,0.09707129663232,0.0,0.0,0.07238844464236657,0.09913766462569508,0.0,0.0,0.19699922901648012,0.0,0.1033192394083062,0.0,0.22166416521853816,0.1565936646522765,0.10523126622317837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08467514209489196,0.20264316792317327,0.2290417237774453,0.0,0.06228706847229652,0.0919256016510531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817827979017127,0.0,0.11247916591390086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993572898994107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875910267801604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204643879407102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063213878855412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222303376345806,0.11010592088598256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905746653662626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10462369123984,0.0,0.09569674526380408,0.11450658212491815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021128452438515,0.0,0.0,0.1176672349324392,0.12415316792169885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109190260634962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250077092434227,0.09066059725990748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.337495576165127,0.10839522334403638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14562408109329408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06390747453317536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12928747869681415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12603228993017127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557105478230814,0.11982820683534375,0.0,0.07057751799201327
mentalhealth,ASpicyStrawberry,2020/01/01,"My 2019 self-reflection Calendar [Link to Calender](https://imgur.com/a/P3QT4YW)

I wanted to try a self-reflection calendar for 2019. I've been on anti-anxiety medication for a year and a half now. Before, I was angry almost every day, very depressed, and had a poor outlook on life; being unable to control the emotions that plagued me my entire life. I think the calendar shows very well how much more happy my life has been when I get to choose how I feel every day. I get to be the husband I want, the father I want, and the person I've always dreamed of being. Looking forward to continued years of rational happiness.",6.99502463054187,7.5551885517241395,7.453891625615762,71.13741379310346,64.34482758620689,10.421674876847293,34.67487684729064,10.290406445055957,3.7389325123152712,496,21,83,11,7,163,71,116,0.09,0.7979999999999999,0.113,0.1513,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,9,0,8,4,0,3,0,14,16,6,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,4,2,1,1,0,1,1,1,4,2,12,3,12,9,2,10,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,1,8,53,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16306020485610012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549548197978928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457174713040492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385643933760571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826383096214965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100359706731096,0.0,0.14025339497656494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317248364453087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2743985496044272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233652768146528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17015380191398638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34669128285078904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34505499545671003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13674414075619826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640436321942025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197057453579244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421851422429262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3397541576982292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043409557754629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055730955028507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687192296726237,0.2881408113420262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641223775628073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097265566803496
mentalhealth,AsymptoticAbyss,2020/01/01,"“I hate my life, I want to die” HELP with trauma-related sleep disorders?? My best friend had a series of traumas growing up and into adulthood that have resulted in an inability to relax. Like ever. She’s been in talk therapy for 6 or so of three last 8 years, and just blew nearly $2k on something called neurofeedback therapy which didn’t do jack. So believe me, she’s tried EVERYTHING at this point and it still flares up and sometimes it’s 2-5 days she will go without sleep. Laying down, she’s anxious, has an elevated heart rate, and has tried at least ambien, Remeron, risperdal, xanax, and klonopin which work for the first couple times but either stop working or are hazardous (benzos) to take all the time. She had some bloodwork done recently which showed a mildly elevated TSH  so she has an endocrinologist appt Friday. That’s like her only area she hasn’t developed yet for this. The reaction I described isn’t inherently about trauma, it’s JUST about sleep since it’s such a huge problem but she has a diagnosis of PTSD and exhibits all the symptoms. 


TL;DR - Friend with trauma-related sleep disorder told me last night she’d rather die than deal with not sleeping one more night. She’s tried to fix this problem for years and is completely out of ideas. What can she do??",6.069799382716049,7.101296810699591,6.115018004115227,78.27153935185187,66.48971193415638,9.367181069958848,31.236882716049386,9.516144504307137,2.7952141975308646,1027,39,189,20,16,325,152,243,0.133,0.775,0.09300000000000001,-0.92,2,0,1,0,0,2,33.0,0,0,0,4,12,11,1,0,11,0,19,9,6,1,3,33,24,15,2,4,10,0,0,2,2,1,3,0,0,0,13,13,0,1,1,2,0,2,5,5,0,3,6,0,19,6,30,16,7,31,0,0,0,0,19,14,0,3,17,124,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812696455227273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780723011190747,0.10973291652737772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677099942564387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096328147022496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569749685795935,0.0,0.06743479140398564,0.10780035191683704,0.0,0.0,0.21704075833733305,0.0,0.2396776038512708,0.0,0.0,0.10700473914259888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458364999954784,0.0,0.0,0.09397490952518436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894163887961579,0.0,0.0,0.1615709636454247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059425832816669084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323478425436497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390822197059018,0.07008669355222974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803943637675465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17046637693555053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385627508455306,0.10216886488916774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19625147694385744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085491715116997,0.07952523496023686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884628228917236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001062489754303,0.12222910734432176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324381746588883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864959874973546,0.0,0.5231949501668055,0.0,0.0,0.08049807198132368,0.10341595099202967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350452663786387,0.08741974759548035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868148772769573,0.07861872052237412,0.08404416084647649,0.0,0.0,0.2391548941587039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194360693128935,0.0,0.0,0.09991488184953304,0.0,0.2129752084983368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061674247020814026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079545906601084,0.0,0.15224691107889046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467090000147505
mentalhealth,misso14,2020/01/01,"Frustration with Mental Health of Mother My Mum suffers with a lot of highs and lows, and has done for as long as I can remember. As a child, I didn’t really understand but learnt to manage her moods etc. As an adult I really struggle to support her, as no matter what the cycle seems to just repeat. I’ve tried listening and rationalising with her, suggesting she seeks professional help, tough love etc. However more and more I find myself frustrated that she is throwing herself a pity party and her woe is me attitude. I have very little patience for it these days, as I feel it’s something that should have been addressed by now. Does anyone feel like this? Are there any suggestions out there of how to deal with it in a more sympathetic way? I feel like I have been the grown up in this relationship got a very long time. I am an only child, my parents are amicably separated (his response is to look after her) and she has very few friends / is unwilling to do new things to make more.",5.886186736474695,6.5061890628272225,6.433206806282723,77.28900741710298,66.74869109947645,10.136300174520072,30.052792321116925,10.125756701596842,2.8580991273996514,785,27,151,18,12,256,121,191,0.11599999999999999,0.725,0.159,0.9243,2,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,5,14,2,1,9,0,19,2,0,2,0,25,30,14,0,1,2,3,3,2,1,1,1,1,1,3,10,11,0,0,7,0,0,2,2,8,0,0,5,5,23,5,28,24,8,18,0,4,1,1,24,7,0,2,10,110,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993720616133342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217610621703294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424048125184334,0.1506515677182083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787761127087455,0.14953969461571534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32594272938478697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22166014616753726,0.20878776721540498,0.0,0.0,0.13355835900973556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11289814243696886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11687192319670185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15532724742589432,0.0,0.0,0.09794652867158148,0.15439227156276067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278153451128867,0.1464586609299472,0.0,0.2586373910128283,0.12271072989959808,0.0,0.0,0.12423281335354595,0.1318862393801416,0.0,0.09754158517665518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726267014085062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113134813606634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113694071389514,0.0,0.0,0.1622578683405665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872266973472197,0.0,0.0,0.1568868019693371,0.16553455582415166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302945730101248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249648564816496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15276472979442002,0.0,0.0,0.16582434051128248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708096049664146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520842108003546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921133055959733,0.0,0.0,0.15212441781602193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3617127501277314,0.0,0.115989617156583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sal4Sale,2020/01/01,"What I’m thankful for Most people like to reflect on the now previous year on New Year’s Day, I’ve had a shit year like most of the people here so this time, I’ll just settle for being thankful I’m still here, I hope you all can feel this way, even for just one day.",2.5497457627118654,2.9222449491525424,3.762500000000003,94.35866525423731,74.08474576271186,6.5779661016949165,21.529661016949152,5.985473137389443,-0.028122033898305254,208,4,51,1,4,68,40,59,0.055,0.703,0.242,0.9053,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,8,6,1,0,3,0,3,1,1,0,1,8,9,1,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,2,5,7,7,3,12,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,3,11,30,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092539985954815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836089237821888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123114119147707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381382953028871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23427172636786106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315641492832242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16246929806515126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3324423041580253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24611279555507215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19147466927625145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4414822561820865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398074616288797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19031233937236894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4631976326998049
mentalhealth,_penyns_,2020/01/01,"A terrible start The first day of a new year, a new decade, and what do I do? Stay in my bed all day on my phone, looking at other people's lives and feeling like shit because they are so much more beautiful and perfect than I am. My family are downstairs and I've spoken a minimal of 4 sentences all day. I wish I would go back in time to re-do today",4.926842105263155,3.685648000000002,6.414736842105262,82.91315789473686,69.0,9.705263157894738,30.842105263157894,8.841846274778883,2.18851052631579,272,9,62,4,4,94,55,76,0.085,0.7090000000000001,0.207,0.8234,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,2,2,4,1,0,5,0,6,1,1,0,3,10,11,5,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,2,8,2,8,10,4,17,0,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,12,40,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17170799368318598,0.0,0.13612483965954536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4320403392612121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105123653800334,0.0,0.112909870435016,0.15952935260781784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18994337609199494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12690954939063467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909569113518476,0.0,0.19718267310606055,0.0,0.18752021308527408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16415509105483972,0.0,0.0,0.4313393050003176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15481177988053005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22921968386515865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805664233997022,0.23801374057498126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021111756617745,0.0,0.21166731621149093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567900772344397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862967983784085,0.0,0.0,0.14380129335288294
mentalhealth,ShloblingCaffineTea,2020/01/01,"I don’t feel safe I’m on the verge of attempting again and I really don’t feel like I can cope. I’ve tried before to drop hints that I feel like a psych ward might to a good place for me temporarily until I get myself sorted. I’m afraid to ask because no one takes me seriously, will they turn me away?",6.554545454545455,4.057418696969698,7.471818181818183,80.67772727272728,66.57575757575758,11.224242424242425,28.060606060606066,9.725611199111238,1.93809696969697,238,4,57,4,3,81,48,66,0.09300000000000001,0.731,0.17600000000000002,0.7451,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,1,1,6,0,1,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,14,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,3,10,4,8,12,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,4,31,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24617126317306395,0.0,0.2474004297504443,0.0,0.0,0.160519129027667,0.0,0.22406830009320827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3994317445556217,0.3762357083248009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13757528979970735,0.0,0.0,0.22086266342362304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572924290010468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793438681869771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843433770423833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751162706951457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869132237299708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979859675459771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787788898016529,0.28641958104378124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Natural-Jellyfish,2020/01/01,"Losing touch with reality Hi everyone,

I've (M24) been struggling with depression, anxiety and ADHD since my early teens. Because of this, finding friends and creating meaningfully connections with people around me was always difficult. Consequentially, I developed a habit of spending most of my free time by myself, completely submerged in whatever obsession I could find to basically distract myself from the fact that I feel fundamentally flawed and incapable of living in a community. By having spent literally (tens of) thousands of hours by myself, I have noticed that it is becoming increasingly difficult to communicate my thoughts and feelings, making it even more difficult to reconcile and reintegrate myself into society. 

​

Last night I took LSD with two of my best friends. The evening started out great, lots of laughing and giggling, generally speaking I felt connected and part of the group. At a certain point I stated noticing that I was in a constant state of confusion and communication was getting increasingly difficult. I felt like my attention span was getting shorter and shorter, making me jump inconclusively between impulses and stimuli. This eventually culminated in me not being able to communicate with even with myself, let alone the people surrounding me. This slowly but surely alienated me from the group dynamic, and eventually I decided to leave, seeing as I was causing strange vibes in the group dynamic. I spent the rest of the night reflecting about the evening and my life in general. Despite the fact that I had been the one who decided to leave the group, I can't help but feeling a feeling of abandonment and disinterest from the people I regarded as being my closest friends. A sort of feeling of: ""You do you"". 

​

I've never felt so alone in my entire life. I feel like the few friends I have are slowly looking at me like I'm insane and I feel like I'm slowly losing touch with reality. They have tried to reach out to me, but I still haven't really processed everything yet and I'm not sure what to do. Everything feels wrong.",8.177376033057849,9.763306548209362,8.350072314049589,62.136017561983465,62.03030303030303,12.000413223140495,40.7448347107438,11.698219412168324,5.621255371900827,1699,93,248,54,24,555,184,363,0.142,0.73,0.128,0.3688,0,2,0,0,0,0,47.0,0,2,1,3,9,31,0,4,20,0,22,2,0,3,6,68,47,21,0,1,5,0,13,4,4,0,2,1,0,0,11,26,0,1,20,0,4,4,5,13,0,4,15,16,42,19,53,28,9,34,0,4,2,0,15,17,0,4,15,187,53,0,0.08554846281984889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281262772361327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17720481482977554,0.0,0.0,0.07118317421058498,0.18538344744707205,0.20790149214398027,0.0,0.0,0.06544433990074465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615626923703236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05214954890285557,0.0944815559831503,0.0,0.0,0.08977783380870255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788183672462177,0.0,0.0,0.08969593563899468,0.09244749666005317,0.0,0.06830348641987426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368276567134531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260158114629667,0.0,0.0,0.08174522232319899,0.15377088437150782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3460469859633328,0.12223167786378232,0.2464198202925663,0.0,0.15637949035252555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643781206499113,0.0,0.08939108188155909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943174822714878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05734133134394246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424800345200162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06973341519940926,0.0,0.18116693980663967,0.0,0.08747909931898219,0.12085081851654812,0.16717863085603854,0.0,0.07554085999042147,0.0,0.07183916283774784,0.19141369489219104,0.0,0.07273024384745475,0.0,0.0,0.11420852645389952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598024842211155,0.0,0.0,0.16056287428924945,0.0,0.0,0.19479498386358352,0.0,0.0,0.057969852418349274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264064859705294,0.0,0.1779255976898047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087094907161563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0548045358759809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817104887060033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07076657247800104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06055164229941073,0.0,0.06831911291538575,0.0,0.0,0.0894338279019709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16125682756647294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791592362293372,0.049883996632768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950474899290188,0.058081790706094434,0.0,0.08356841749716543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353381447082372,0.20790149214398027,0.0
mentalhealth,dottywine,2020/01/01,"How can I get cheap refills? Y’all I need to get Zoloft refill. And I am about to pay rent and bills and I am going to be so tight on cash...

Is there anyway to get a prescription for cheaper than the $80 it costs to see my doctor??",1.1991176470588236,2.169875529411769,3.0334803921568643,96.0231617647059,78.01960784313727,5.8843137254901965,18.63235294117647,5.985473137389443,-0.4220235294117649,176,3,44,1,4,59,39,51,0.042,0.958,0.0,-0.2359,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,1,0,6,11,5,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,9,10,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,30,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.457189006003797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7001050235270847,0.0,0.2538547057076972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33120256050494284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3559407550793087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samuelgibbs14,2020/01/01,"I have everything good but still never feel happy I have a good family, good friends, everything good going for me but the slightest things bring me down hard.  I don’t know who to talk to because I don’t want to scare my parents, and I feel like nobody would believe me.  Any advice?",4.325892857142858,5.500225517857146,4.830714285714286,85.36428571428574,70.60714285714286,7.742857142857144,26.5,8.07648339933343,1.5543714285714283,223,7,44,3,4,71,39,56,0.141,0.541,0.318,0.9091,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,8,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,0,1,9,11,3,0,2,2,1,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,3,9,7,5,10,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,28,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18217967693782533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678048999927113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364751886781214,0.0,0.0,0.210045580321124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33510701148124744,0.0,0.17575196471320506,0.0,0.1885317428137136,0.13318741205360538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440372835763508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595388354506187,0.6254829280641097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19846085818389167,0.16700689691583384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245842390924273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108150024412907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437882337472004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070112234814893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18665145143172826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888523175045795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149847377965096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385746598732685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996271615969223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13243629581092306,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eaw4242,2020/01/01,"Starting the new year off by taking antidepressants for the first time! Hey y’all, I (24F) am starting Wellbutrin/Bupropion. Does anyone have any words of advice? The pharmacist said with or without food, do you recommend taking with a meal? I’m starting on 150XR. Thanks in advance! Happy 2020!",3.5698626373626365,6.788696480769232,3.645604395604393,82.15653846153847,84.19230769230771,6.048351648351648,26.659340659340657,7.447530270364453,2.023018681318682,235,10,37,4,7,72,45,52,0.0,0.81,0.19,0.8843,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,2,0,2,0,0,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,5,11,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,3,2,9,10,0,11,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,7,21,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23609989850612584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643040613778252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689403334767675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21143579543367472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20551456364490084,0.2921575069073215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571998658810158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233349830022767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22982780366261146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5130414529319212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633234612270936,0.0,0.0,0.22244334832710846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408855710523281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232904801938457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558984294707195
mentalhealth,jaxxtar,2020/01/01,Nervous about seeming creepy when I just want to be nice? Started a new job last month and I'm trying to befriend some of my coworkers. But I (20F) always feel like I'd creep them out or annoy them if I tried to talk to them about something non work related. How can I tell what's just my brain making things up and if they actually dont like me?,2.2029223744292206,3.675850684931511,3.541301369863014,91.3433675799087,76.39726027397259,6.510502283105023,23.125570776255714,7.1686216300943375,0.6433762557077625,272,8,61,3,6,89,57,73,0.069,0.8,0.131,0.5362,1,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,4,1,6,5,1,1,1,0,3,1,1,2,0,15,9,8,0,3,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,11,3,9,8,1,7,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,5,7,37,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.2428637765542776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070819563893388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27782415074117683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916768568227623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258374743235058,0.17779464926572194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24696767341170206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20286440167002856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431731819217721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612440620061747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19864775068911664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403627269634313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265642860047573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19159430148804293,0.0,0.0,0.1761533211887148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20003438461563766,0.2175256391530618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653399100156309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3379363447443913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14679151918688688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18118223122561147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,as122000,2020/01/01,"Why am I sad? Hey,

I was in such a bad place for months, years, and I didn’t even want to be happy, I didn’t want happiness, I was mentally done. But I feel a better now and I want to be happy, and I want to stop letting people walk over and I want to get better now. 

I’ve recently tried being nicer to myself, being more proud of who I am and what I’ve accomplished. But there’s just one thing that I’m still struggling with and can’t wrap my head around..

Why am I sad? Sometimes I feel like I get sad for no reason, or the smallest thing off sets me for the rest of the day. Does anyone have advice to get over this? Thank you!",0.8836618004866175,2.3373031021897823,2.6435218978102166,96.44416362530414,80.02189781021897,5.734549878345499,17.25608272506083,6.42735559955562,-0.4602939172749396,483,8,118,4,12,160,81,137,0.132,0.613,0.255,0.9403,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,4,8,13,0,1,5,0,15,1,1,1,0,21,27,9,0,5,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,5,0,1,5,2,17,8,17,17,2,16,0,3,0,0,3,6,0,1,9,80,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844409271289526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906311412581227,0.0,0.0,0.12612162714232092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182934953736368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506017184657064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136926327660884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398157327070992,0.14498367947775864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357562478828756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327122827390526,0.10121332265197083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220594997338528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4524500303017075,0.0,0.0,0.14540039198326155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487325150756902,0.0,0.06921570987597735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427760289440648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308438677778665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960032862093931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098220260856284,0.0,0.1480212072195764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14566646645544967,0.1398879027179047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012113119153444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131425918329842,0.11844743295452748,0.0,0.1481104577412517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043617440761426,0.0,0.0,0.18824640368844026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618866607544202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4178207121360136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556810062272918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123466286280656
mentalhealth,robmay90,2020/01/01,"Intrusive Thoughts and Finances - Advice on Forgiving Yourself Hi folks,

I have suffered with mental health issues for a number of years. I'm taking 60mg Fluoxetine daily to support the depression, but recently I have been experiencing anxiety attacks. The first one was so intense an ambulance was called because I thought I was having a heart attack. 

I also have two intrusive thoughts. The first is around taking a knife to my wrist but my main one involved hanging myself. Now, I do not believe these are suicidal thoughts because there is no intention to act on them. But when I'm under pressure these thoughts increase and I have had to phone crisis lines once or twice. 

My current situation is that I am at home bed bound recovering from major spinal surgery. I can't physically do much and I have two children under 5 years old. Over the last week I have noticed a considerable change in my mental health. I am stressing and obsessing about debt. Not because I am 'up to my eyes in debt' or anything like that, but because it will take me so long to pay it off and because I've let it build up so recklessly. There is a huge feeling of regret and a sense of doom. What I am asking is, does anyone have any techniques or advice they can give me to take my focus away from this, or to help me stop beating myself up for allowing it to happen in the first place?

Thank you in advance.",6.491061320754717,6.930663452830192,6.721450471698116,76.37274174528305,65.41509433962264,9.341981132075473,35.05306603773585,9.188382445141503,3.1512311320754733,1105,49,199,18,16,356,157,265,0.205,0.711,0.083,-0.9907,3,0,0,0,0,1,22.0,0,1,2,5,10,13,2,3,12,0,29,6,4,2,0,31,46,19,1,1,10,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,2,1,10,8,0,2,8,0,4,4,4,9,0,8,10,3,28,4,34,34,4,36,1,4,1,0,12,18,0,4,15,148,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975606215298625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083863530656797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874211444195437,0.0,0.0773307023674663,0.0,0.0,0.07068185436400443,0.0,0.08318536827964344,0.08998819147259167,0.09450199542409367,0.2300003987844335,0.09497385673224884,0.0,0.0,0.30810619000211403,0.0,0.0,0.11388958443483245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322036043736182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693584590306776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706543652796067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884612560696502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05111224384964877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579517305006697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969711393235348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939023449256889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148999073814492,0.0,0.1197876895576303,0.0677559806430598,0.0,0.10139774793788522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550777896980837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239878321075571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336753649085643,0.0,0.049385634283025816,0.0,0.0,0.08945814770932878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20374232273131707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431002277152755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508736235002333,0.10607301182346604,0.10765355409279116,0.13699731437273788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561361313748656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981047390288553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11362517711926333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845126289412764,0.1157939545500044,0.0,0.0,0.11057194739588967,0.114711475314291,0.0,0.0,0.3040171100054207,0.0,0.0,0.09306663498956784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4012559438800988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19749315007515053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108529001741108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301924578148842
mentalhealth,YeetThatLemon,2020/01/01,"I need some guidence here. To keep things short, I like to help other depressed people and give advice or just be there for them if they need someone, it makes me happy to do so. 

But at the same time I struggle with my own demons and I originally joined reddit to talk about them and I fear now that talking about my issues now will make other people think I'm not a good person to talk to or ask for advice due to them knowing about my issues if you guys catch my jist, I recently just need to just talk about stuff and stuff. 

Any advice or words of wisdom?",6.207631578947368,5.284554850877194,6.000701754385967,85.88157894736844,66.28070175438597,8.301754385964912,26.017543859649123,6.42735559955562,0.8551333333333329,439,8,94,2,6,137,73,114,0.092,0.807,0.10099999999999999,0.2718,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,4,0,12,7,0,2,2,0,3,0,0,3,0,27,14,11,0,5,10,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,7,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,16,4,17,12,3,9,1,1,0,0,14,2,0,6,7,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4113688743580667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542511059811824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311839683474046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086082858230285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15790347712038644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346115371907487,0.0,0.11769708728073153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13894279066962342,0.0,0.14937747394495948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405619828595023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929235319247344,0.0,0.1247263908358912,0.0,0.0,0.07711838338299984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855520304652964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873346774190124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3121453341534617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19456594285750875,0.12252547688021415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855299023535048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11889604327139322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14669707963639642,0.3212747437851787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4511483625040263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322500954453862,0.08991393307947378,0.0,0.0,0.08182403457716285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meagagamer,2020/01/01,"I think I may use eating as a comfort I notice that when I’m lonely I can never stop eating. Doesn’t matter what it is small snack,meal, baked goods, anything edible. I’ll spend hours talking with friends but when I’m left alone with my thoughts I just can’t resist the urge to eat to drown out my feelings and I occasionally just binge. Is this even the right sub for this?",2.2371428571428567,4.1888685584415635,3.105194805194806,92.39207792207796,77.70129870129871,5.43896103896104,20.090909090909093,6.1826913282559595,-0.07203376623376599,297,7,64,2,7,94,58,77,0.128,0.785,0.087,-0.7189,0,3,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,0,6,4,0,1,1,15,12,5,1,0,3,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,5,4,4,1,3,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,8,3,7,10,0,9,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256429802976098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792847646843771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6687924703519108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389812529043425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015935615346968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16832236507295872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827352667837253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145536576000388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367115316395357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680313247587932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480413455369511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860559689442341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18214533524284066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511205732852206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13959943213940126,0.0,0.17296089195617728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18816586386916412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,r2ni,2020/01/01,"I'm tired of living.  Like the title said: I'm tired of living. I'm not suicidal or anything, I'm just so bored with life. Everything is so pointlesssss. Idk. I'm not even old - I'm about to turn 18. I do have a very ambitious goal for my future, and I'll probably enjoy it in the end, but it just seems so pointless rn. We're all gonna die anyways, so I might as well do nothing with my life. I think I should also mention that I do have clinical depression and I'm taking medication for it. The meds seemed to be working like 2 weeks ago, so idk if it's to do with those. Also the depression manifests in a weird fucking way, since I never feel sad, haven't been suicidal, and only rarely feel like I'm a failure. Sadness seems to be a main symptom and in my ~6 years dealing with this shit, I've never (that I can remember) felt unexplainably sad. Back to my main point of being tired of life. I'm really struggling to find a reason to do the school assignments I've been given for break. Logically, I know I should do them, because they'll help me make a better future for myself, but I just can't find it in myself to start doing something productive. I know I have to help myself if I want to get better, but I don't care enough to want to get better. I get the theory behind it, I just don't see a reason to put it into practice. 

Anyways, sorry for the wall of text and the rambling. I don't really feel like making the structure make more sense either. It should be mostly intelligible. I don't exactly know what the purpose of this post was either, I guess I just wanted to share my thoughts and feelings with people who don't know me personally.

To anyone who's made it this far: Have a nice day!",2.705543831168832,4.128961323863639,4.532175324675325,84.96022727272731,74.9659090909091,7.414935064935065,23.935064935064936,8.07648339933343,1.2819428571428568,1334,40,277,21,28,454,169,352,0.142,0.6890000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.7998,0,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,2,6,18,22,2,1,18,0,32,11,1,6,4,64,75,20,3,8,15,0,5,4,0,6,9,1,0,1,18,12,0,0,20,0,0,1,11,10,1,0,8,7,32,12,39,57,8,24,0,5,1,1,11,8,2,9,16,179,50,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980692009725432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399528315271454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295166657815178,0.0,0.07408772188053553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692281696066987,0.0,0.05488197308404319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23887492277997754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917924560986279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05806245289215797,0.09281785743848928,0.15508688559763187,0.0,0.09343781262067362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974061424777612,0.09302593915276043,0.0,0.05946453009778336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091392653182185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18208922003171887,0.12863612045875647,0.08644373875514545,0.0,0.16457313938440893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08323207396989153,0.14111221629882376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991791360693713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069156760238554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19791441183193856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907743645500624,0.1759381109117494,0.0,0.15899778740033446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851893710988702,0.18028888283829236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000398301278654,0.09069661388008914,0.0,0.09550850884811213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887468997004215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863870327503081,0.0,0.09447223666293293,0.0,0.0,0.06847252156464208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062416058360442575,0.07861146923536587,0.0,0.0,0.08510825776263628,0.0,0.08622467149671419,0.0,0.09706848813980036,0.0,0.0,0.09050587515962208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535214114438355,0.18513342547004868,0.0,0.0,0.10198740734227846,0.0,0.08563995920220717,0.0,0.0,0.09111603096814314,0.07174293446328188,0.24588212502336826,0.0,0.0,0.09241537805799273,0.07447445294728099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931015007260634,0.0,0.10078217034211932,0.06372430198890755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411979660384276,0.0,0.19695828379137145,0.0,0.0,0.09357652971202067,0.06769199788022602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05768813608469382,0.0,0.07147444169066786,0.0,0.3104316684871032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979277163588295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428488350867628,0.15930759127818764,0.07146230147250877,0.07221732066169878,0.0,0.0809485501965769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554353411977913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057976918327191665
mentalhealth,YouthAgainstSuicides,2020/01/01,"Embracing mental well being Hey 👋 Happy new year from Y.A.S.S!
Watch out for the 👉   2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣
🅼🅴🅽🆃🅰🅻   🅷🅴🅰🅻🆃🅷
Challenge",-3.744142857142855,-3.3009943666666643,0.2414285714285711,100.96500000000002,126.0,3.0476190476190474,17.61904761904762,5.288315135182226,-0.5090952380952372,99,4,25,1,7,36,25,30,0.0,0.67,0.33,0.75,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,6,0,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5130771915112424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4857229685468241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4654997583983742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4333583419413502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3103796317059094
mentalhealth,20-CharactersAllowed,2020/01/01,"Are there ways to get around light-headedness from Seroquel? I'm on 100mg/d and it's been working miracles for my mood swings. Problem being every so often, I get extremely nauseous and light-headed and my muscles start to give. The first time it happened, I fell (luckily onto my bed) and the second time I was in bed and couldn't move for a few minutes. Other times it's been, like clockwork, nausea, then semi-blindness, then muscle weakness. From everything I've heard, it seems Seroquel is the mental health equivalent to vhemo, just hoping it kills the illness before it kills me, but has anyone found solutions to avoid these side effects?

I have an appointment to see my doctor on the 30th of this month and can't get in to see her before then.",6.21080808080808,6.925527314685315,6.202470862470863,78.89379176379177,66.06293706293707,8.593317793317793,30.574203574203572,8.515128840125781,2.3677760683760685,598,21,105,8,9,189,98,143,0.096,0.863,0.040999999999999995,-0.7622,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,5,8,2,1,7,0,10,4,0,1,0,17,23,11,2,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,2,0,9,7,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,5,0,2,5,3,10,2,17,16,1,19,0,0,2,0,3,7,0,3,10,70,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218673652098783,0.0,0.0,0.15515472667553085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966152846498611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17839282668036247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14684653451614996,0.0,0.1566402856543453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14825067447322246,0.0,0.1910995887386812,0.0,0.0,0.2731774222039824,0.16719449931095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15412374860739825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17887144804452015,0.18526173182689795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731089336136867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3856513158825627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514911193891914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17564295869443858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13911632381636133,0.1852422993542233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667716423410382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27777254743878554,0.15866673781968646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233631006986245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30488906326086024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383429997278452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12688493004081094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImGonnaKatw,2020/01/01,"PSA: People with mental health issues aren’t conversation pieces For New Years Eve I tailed around my mum at an old get together with some of her friends who support homeopathic medication as an effective treatment for health issues. While I have absolutely no problem with this normally, I do have a problem when I start getting recommended lavender or another herb to help with my severe anxiety and depression even though I just got there. My anxiety and depression is not a conversation starter, nor are my surgeries, or the time someone broke into my closet. Those pieces of information are for me to dish out when I feel comfortable or when I want to. I’m sorry, Jennifer, but an herb is not going to make the difference of whether I shower this week or even get out of bed.

There is more to you than your illness. Don’t let someone take that away from you.",6.999624999999997,7.853844712499999,7.0225000000000035,73.21250000000002,64.375,10.65,35.375,10.577609850970193,3.8757,694,31,122,17,10,222,103,160,0.132,0.7909999999999999,0.077,-0.792,2,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,1,10,8,0,0,7,0,11,5,0,2,0,28,23,15,0,4,9,1,1,0,1,0,4,0,3,0,5,10,1,0,3,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,1,1,18,3,25,21,4,19,0,3,0,0,11,6,0,5,12,92,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520983213241726,0.2264668073456619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176744680765834,0.0,0.0,0.1390678311264471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25497546041866703,0.0,0.0,0.1546473589870622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955290530444892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484237389891275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435837882702515,0.0,0.2319999668756036,0.0,0.0841220693128242,0.0,0.1183835568829954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31467253260090755,0.0,0.0,0.0992133793243793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30898477735121016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513584854113453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880319824790876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491126138317585,0.14916738092877688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14295675576348632,0.0,0.0,0.14502626251724135,0.0,0.0,0.15532004493538176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026170791723942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832665685674431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721826567304646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25083042811043765,0.0,0.0,0.16569408938705765,0.1047679381584537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679691298864208,0.0,0.0,0.11129115308273116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14542698332329618,0.0,0.08631051571609004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730488134187099,0.0,0.11873115199239212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531877171409826
mentalhealth,anonxmous78,2020/01/01,Risperidone I'm 16 and have been taking risperidone for a year now the last 4months I've been having ed and I am on 2mg risperidone daily if I come off it will ed go away,-0.7731578947368442,1.3498101052631597,1.0371578947368434,101.16310526315792,92.68421052631578,3.04,18.12631578947369,3.1291,-0.9927010526315794,136,4,32,0,5,44,30,38,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,4,10,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,4,7,0,8,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,3,19,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4957149132219076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4544965865138814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29985773094812845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43007946685859894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39670342052440666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3397689909013554
mentalhealth,i_value_my_privacy_,2020/01/01,"I just don’t know if I can do this anymore. There’s nothing for me on this planet. So I (18M) saw the New Year in crying in my friend’s car outside the party that I was attending. I don’t know why, someone made a slightly unkind comment about me I think and then it all went downhill from there. For the past three days I have been severely depressed, thinking about death a lot, but thought it was maybe because I was lonely and hadn’t seen my friends for a while. But I saw them last night and even then I just couldn’t hold it together. I’m just so sad all the time, not even for a particular reason. And I’m also not very well-liked by many people and always feel like even my friends secretly don’t like me. So that doesn’t help.

There’s so much pressure on me and I’m just being crushed by this feeling and I can’t get anything done. I don’t think I’m meant to be on this planet, I never feel at home, or safe, I’m constantly threatened by my own mind. I just don’t think I can do this for much longer. I might leave soon.",0.9669273863391544,2.778686153846156,2.396638655462187,96.62392156862744,81.12669683257919,5.2954966602025415,21.383538030596853,6.1826913282559595,0.02191126912303432,804,24,189,6,21,260,119,221,0.142,0.7390000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.47,0,2,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,0,19,11,0,1,8,0,22,0,0,2,3,41,44,19,1,2,11,0,3,2,3,1,0,0,1,0,10,7,0,2,13,0,0,3,12,5,0,1,13,6,25,6,18,27,6,22,0,3,3,0,7,6,0,4,15,124,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028393695258107,0.11474942061318084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676638825988152,0.0,0.0,0.11348546243932035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406664339157235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490281488079892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148403268395358,0.08893841178505638,0.0,0.11877883732679027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411264327311988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27325822115702425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091893111570736,0.09852057295135562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196391194669547,0.0,0.07205055806832092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243595304474904,0.0,0.13833166280340314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151579829829094,0.11241236542554618,0.0,0.1460232815382347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13474849388482768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172433434600866,0.0,0.13049065254913833,0.0,0.13981574694959284,0.13854581454634776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462972138756708,0.13924645268726732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20275458226628834,0.0,0.1063621475484188,0.13319114874596527,0.0,0.12941609447038846,0.0,0.13232519655871705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164754817026902,0.09560714065545282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14179105436877856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579531570476313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684789810054065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35346017583806416,0.0,0.1094825142678425,0.08041450490176101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137874690063588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399468386494625,0.1278408911218817,0.12443934536616764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880739237437182
mentalhealth,fuckinassman,2020/01/01,"Not really sure what I’m going through... Hi all,

I hope you’ll entertain a post in which I vent about stuff I don’t know how to say to any one in person and that I’ve never said to anyone before. :)

I’m a 24-year old male college student in graduate school and I feel like I have become *extremely* socially withdrawn in the past two years or so. 

I used to pretty actively post (*at least* a few times a week) to social media and engage with friends on sites like Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter, but I find that I’ve become less and less interested in posting any sort of material whatsoever. I still actively use these sites to see *other* people’s posts and to keep up with news and what not, but I seem to have no interest in sharing anything of myself. As an example, I have stopped posting to my Facebook and Instagram altogether and have reached a tweet rate of about < 10 tweets/year over the last two years.

This may sound silly and like a non-issue, but it also seems to be affecting me in a similar manner when having conversations in person or having an open-style discussion in groups. I often find that I listen and allow the other person(s) to speak *much* more than I do. This results in a lot of, what feel like, one-sides conversations. I dislike this about myself.

The weird thing is that I *am* interested in contributing to the conversation most of the time. I just can’t bring myself to it. I definitely think that I’m opinionated, so it’s not as if I’m just lacking thoughts on things. 

I do tend to do a lot of self-criticism. I would say that it is not uncommon for me to remember things I said years ago and think about how stupid I was to say it or to remember the ridicule I might’ve felt at the time. 

I will often consider what the value added is to a conversation when I am thinking about contributing a particular piece of information. Most of the time I decide that what I have to say is not relevant or important and so I say nothing instead. I’ll acknowledge what was said, maybe nod my head, give a generic response, and kind of just move on.

I am seriously concerned that this is affecting my professional life as well. I’m working in a science-related field with some of the brightest people I have ever met in my life. Part of communicating and, in general, *doing* science effectively involves understanding that *words matter.* When describing or trying to apply our understanding of physical phenomena, you have to be precise. Every day, you have to be careful to say one thing and not the other because the other is not correct and is not what you are trying to say. This forces me to think a lot before speaking and writing. 

Over the course of this post, I have deleted and rewritten words many, many times. I suppose this is pretty normal in the writing process and maybe I shouldn’t read into it too much, but sometimes I just wish I could say or write what I mean without having to put in all the mental energy to think about how what I said can be misconstrued or how it is not really what I mean. I don’t know. It feels like communicating what I want to say can be extremely difficult. I just wish it was easier I guess.

I didn’t really write this with the intent to elicit any sort of response (not that I wouldn’t read or consider any). I figured it would hopefully, somehow, be helpful to myself if I just wrote it down and posted it somewhere anonymously. So for anyone who did spend their time reading my nonsensical and unnecessarily lengthy post, thank you. Hope you have a great day. :)",4.30163927180309,5.982237591508057,5.485922263045938,78.68404182435981,71.32796486090777,8.844321666344372,28.845796845216718,9.357511181758683,2.6112822398408797,2797,109,527,63,53,929,288,683,0.040999999999999995,0.7979999999999999,0.161,0.9976,0,0,0,0,0,0,91.0,1,6,1,2,32,27,2,0,34,0,54,3,1,13,7,143,101,51,0,15,31,0,4,5,1,7,2,17,0,3,53,27,0,2,27,4,1,4,19,5,1,4,13,22,65,22,88,74,18,63,0,0,1,0,49,28,0,29,28,389,118,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04853521006666232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04378593552983112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489356063335292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656910848567375,0.0,0.045057034408172304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03337690627906571,0.12094072165511027,0.0931815005180044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582430864206548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043715796449482765,0.0,0.0,0.07062228049077476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04952720191638749,0.04613174418248977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830542501923172,0.11734661206731033,0.05257144385870125,0.0,0.10008645718464694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042302013827603964,0.0,0.0,0.052524044209459685,0.03111737833097714,0.0,0.0,0.060365349892422815,0.060316576526082875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05619235012886062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03669976600849988,0.0,0.0,0.16314617980226015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05714788220196927,0.0,0.04866696126549345,0.0,0.05701679941556364,0.0601816079468874,0.04463098363449915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734729308759823,0.1337476932048539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13964706792030385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102184871442017,0.11001344840024492,0.11928408559938836,0.0,0.0,0.05517812228014366,0.058084255531323015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819374896208662,0.0804994753796896,0.0,0.042228870895059716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536462918178433,0.05253695765307563,0.0,0.0574540384006203,0.0,0.11130610169511364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059292137916966414,0.05226791150303442,0.07591763973263159,0.14342456149183147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195057309739186,0.1114069223131535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0550418642617246,0.0,0.0,0.1643033803159513,0.0,0.10522847633875584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12404889785195562,0.0,0.2083304758491748,0.3918758808673938,0.0,0.055412935345583926,0.0436310333832062,0.09969010686544946,0.05711929567582204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116275286850992,0.0,0.0,0.05415209379403281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04372579776468356,0.04577594003468552,0.0,0.0,0.06267905856406521,0.0,0.0,0.051604032381677135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05040918447197555,0.0,0.0,0.1455017786716477,0.1754174825825126,0.0,0.043467747378630135,0.19156140547316888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434735393507776,0.0,0.1069714042546586,0.1139995590195352,0.0,0.09457798399905183,0.0,0.0,0.03229472414371425,0.0,0.04391953510417013,0.0,0.04922950144667702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592644167932995,0.05277991548688546,0.0,0.03986081900088729,0.0,0.0,0.07778988713988977,0.0,0.0,0.17629560861381874
mentalhealth,LovelyPeace,2020/01/01,"Let’s Jump Start 2020 Off With Mental Health Awareness Lets Start The New Year Off With Mental Awareness

Hello, my Spiritual Family I'm still New to this hold blogging thing, I just was doing some searching on the web and came cross where I make T-shirts I was like cool idea so I did some reading into the site I came across I can donate to different charities. Which I love I can do that. I'm doing this because I'm also trying to talk more about Mental Health the reason I'm giving my shirts the labels (Peace&Love/Inner Awareness Of The Goddess)Spiritual Family you wouldn't mind supporting my online website to spread Mental Awareness

[https://www.bonfire.com/mental-awareness/](https://www.bonfire.com/mental-awareness/)",7.588241430700446,10.834354426229513,5.855126676602082,72.83838301043221,66.21311475409837,7.059314456035768,24.205663189269746,8.00094639256281,1.5905475409836072,608,16,88,8,11,177,79,122,0.021,0.855,0.125,0.9041,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,6,1,11,4,1,2,0,15,23,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,6,0,1,2,2,1,4,1,0,0,0,5,1,12,4,13,15,3,17,0,0,0,1,5,7,0,2,7,56,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163225924550747,0.0,0.12415100595657975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984894331862987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26210564164697625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971520724178553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21603795918623256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109918785047877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435934742135928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293506488737663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343384661400895,0.0,0.055979634322925916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068318841927696,0.0,0.07648527224696522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6928383661474693,0.0,0.1156965139641612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22133061637697732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146143524387128,0.0,0.0,0.11781076203509333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16220536207130629,0.0,0.0915064069776556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002782153077394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09209775201606912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612408266827718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779456950685852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378791713307158
mentalhealth,ISuckAtNames22,2020/01/01,Needless(?) Stress I can't stop stressing over something really specific. I feel like I've been in high stress for almost 3 days and it's making me feel sick (well sicker I have a chronic illness too). How can I quit stressing or stop thinking about it.,1.8778231292516985,4.575655591836735,2.766428571428573,89.77440476190479,84.91836734693878,4.899319727891157,24.493197278911573,6.42735559955562,0.9286299319727892,200,8,37,2,6,63,40,49,0.217,0.581,0.20199999999999999,-0.4292,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,4,1,0,4,4,0,2,0,10,8,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,2,5,2,4,7,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,4,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17730457588244308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419199041580187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17905831938673775,0.1264949541645717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18707842490165336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650479817104947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819196603918936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18832995058174173,0.0,0.0,0.11343208855184918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363129457776976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29606779443481457,0.8113074025025636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345581791255245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15920230041588604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,littlebabyfatgirl,2020/01/01,"tw// what am i supposed to do i’ve been consistently depressed for 3 almost 4 years now and anxious my whole life. medications haven’t been helpful and neither has therapy. therapy doesn’t work when you have selective mutism, even when it’s a therapist that works specifically with selective mutism. i even went to a camp for selective mutism but it didn’t help. i haven’t been to therapy for 2 weeks cause of christmas and my dad is in the process of looking for a new one which takes forever. 

i’m 16 and basically a highschool dropout. i started homeschool this year and haven’t done any work. i don’t have any friend, not even online. i don’t have any hobbies. i just scroll through my phone all day. i’ve tried drawing, instruments, reading, anything but it doesn’t interest me.

i’ve told my dad and brother everything there is to know about me. i’m super open but it doesn’t help at all. it doesn’t get me nowhere. there’s nothing they can do and i have nobody else to go to. 

mental hospitals don’t seem like they’d be helpful, especially with my anxiety, ocd, and selective mutism.  i’m used to everyday being the same. waking up at 1pm and showering, i can’t go without a shower. then the rest of the day just fades away. also i can’t be without my dad or brother for more than an hour unless i’m home alone. 

besides i’m not bad enough to go to a mental hospital. the worst i do is scratch my arm with a paper clip nightly, it doesn’t even go deep so i usually don’t bleed. i tried a razor back when i was 13 but i barely scratched the surface and had a panic attack. everything gives me a panic attack. like today i had 3 small sips of beer and was absolutely freaking out (i’ve only drank a sip before and had the same reaction.) 

i do want to die but i don’t have the courage to do it. hell i can’t be in a crowded area without panicking how am i gonna ever kms (i know those aren’t related but point is i’m a pussy.) i’m just stuck like this forever

i don’t have any friends but there’s a few people on twitter that occasionally like my tweets and i’ll like theirs, it feels like a fake friendship. someone responded to one of my rants on there last night and i broke down crying cause i really love that person (Platonically.) When I get responses on reddit I usually feel nothing because it doesn’t feel genuinely but on there from them? It really made my night last night. It helped me get to sleep.

anyways i annoy everyone as you can probably tell if you read this far that’s dope",1.621026637069921,3.8944506764705937,3.3640066592674813,88.0833129855716,81.45098039215686,6.9078801331853485,24.72068072512024,8.029587711577364,1.5301801701812798,1975,77,412,39,53,657,243,510,0.13,0.733,0.13699999999999998,0.4746,3,1,1,0,0,1,51.0,0,3,4,5,24,24,4,2,24,0,54,9,3,5,3,56,87,34,1,2,19,5,5,6,2,1,3,0,3,1,21,19,2,0,6,3,0,5,26,12,0,2,15,6,49,12,47,66,11,51,1,2,1,1,27,19,1,4,33,257,70,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762701634612124,0.07888595359002229,0.0,0.06091065470806169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20718445732275967,0.0,0.05826748178483821,0.08604693432468358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06267888151289258,0.0,0.0,0.1733017241068749,0.07156132425754738,0.05856765642125498,0.06359619284501222,0.046430644657630527,0.0,0.06481243502681794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648880646779234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366578001803081,0.0982427185720121,0.0,0.06560245260511463,0.0,0.07904923295547724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794519901811832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06362768427176997,0.0,0.0,0.07870078428357365,0.0,0.20123011703497973,0.0688973355960442,0.0,0.07278075170348461,0.136907824538289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155368429219608,0.05441365956368298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176927397590207,0.0,0.11938220883181665,0.07306624563345733,0.1731496531023719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552653892352517,0.0,0.07640162639308926,0.0,0.07500906898890787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371868950776164,0.12417240378888462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053798944853561216,0.2232678450800811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06396102578824958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874361488201143,0.07207097696800345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673015407569425,0.15351667209920636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356248149650142,0.0,0.2859099615691489,0.0,0.1461684190732143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322534614846016,0.05792837135631685,0.0,0.1787309282307265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05280454881288205,0.06650601261168489,0.0,0.0,0.07200235435332622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212081721935903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523750544505929,0.0,0.09758895271075672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933949912928335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622192221165146,0.0,0.06453598022733842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05391133473229222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05726804127338616,0.0,0.06657324123155857,0.0,0.2613105172358133,0.08843565931634961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219732981305961,0.07278075170348461,0.0,0.10342467162571642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578375974662028,0.16777419301243968,0.0,0.044925220105659545,0.0,0.061096505197339564,0.0,0.0,0.0706074936374821,0.0,0.08503764094025383,0.0,0.22026656520005786,0.0,0.166351264612545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809799254382012
mentalhealth,Tocirah,2020/01/01,"I want to go next level in relation but I don't feel like I can. I have a girl friend in my friend group that I really like. And in the most cheesiest way; she lights up my life whenever she's around. We don't even need to talk and I already cheer up. I have depression and a form of cyclothymia. And when I'm real down she, without knowing, gets me out of them real quick. 
I really want to open up more to her and off course hope that a relationship is possible, but I'm struggling with two things.

1. I've always felt that I don't deserve love, and I know that I shouldn't think that but I still do.
2. I'm afraid of sounding too clingy/pathetic if i want to talk about how much she helps me and such.

I'd really appreciate your takes on this and maybe some tips. But most importantly I just wanted this of my chest, thanks for reading.",1.2484024064171138,3.1903255113636386,2.862419786096257,92.98017379679146,80.81818181818181,6.641176470588236,20.012032085561497,7.724431198458867,0.5126594919786092,654,17,151,11,17,215,106,176,0.1,0.7090000000000001,0.191,0.9427,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,1,1,0,10,11,0,2,4,0,9,3,1,1,0,38,28,15,0,8,7,0,2,2,2,1,1,1,0,1,8,13,0,0,5,1,0,1,5,3,0,1,1,4,27,8,24,26,6,19,0,1,0,1,17,13,0,5,6,100,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670201293237765,0.0,0.12593656156773353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473491166838486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035881383989215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09996622962956674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652785935088913,0.10812553244170013,0.1453211624513833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338675665817547,0.0,0.07907490507292708,0.0,0.08601653786894482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014477112780733,0.0,0.0,0.15032617683781288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16635763797055314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690403115204926,0.14788538282464067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13660062603187953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520529115557358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126075755447208,0.11222520972594713,0.0,0.0,0.16096402330212278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17062606043607995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15139244470426733,0.344542254168091,0.2908789141427561,0.0,0.0,0.16249485515604026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208694929010628,0.0,0.0,0.15822543597865898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379748218057588,0.2433011840630639,0.0,0.13934411437096642,0.0,0.0,0.1005512026269374,0.0969799214634535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478484104138877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35708411328592704,0.12013576542370485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589743232571445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zakrie,2020/01/01,"Struggling, & suicidal (without yearning for it.) I’ll talk about each issue that keeps cycling my mind, and the suicidal stuff comes at the end.

For all of 2019, And part of 2018, I decided to quit public school in hopes of it making life easier as a homeschool student. It did for my academic, however, my mental health has worsened to the point of suicidal thoughts.

I just turned 18 two weeks ago, and I’ve been in constant fear of fucking up. I don’t drink alcohol due to alcoholics, I don’t smoke weed, I don’t even smoke cigarettes. I’m terrified my family will kick me out if I mess up in the slightest. They preach that they won’t since my whole family has lived here for most of their lives, and only two of us moved out. The fear is instilled in me, though. I keep waking up everyday fearing for the day they stop caring, and I struggle more. I love my family, and they haven’t given me reasons for wanting to kick me out but, I just can’t seem to keep the idea out of my head.

Homeschooling helped me academically but, I already missed the deadline for the rest of the year as a homeschooled student. My family bought me everything to go back this January, Im terrified. I have never been bullied but, my self esteem has worsened to the point where I gained more weight in the year, I can’t stop acknowledging it. I ask for ways to lose weight but, I am terrified of a job and can’t bring myself to go to an interview, and my family won’t buy me just a few things to help me jump start a diet. They didn’t before I was 18, and they won’t now. I understand they aren’t obligated, even though they said they would if I considered a diet. I can’t go back to school because my mind thinks “you’re disgusting, fat, ugly, your old friends won’t talk to you because you gained weight.” 

My boyfriend and I have been having issues, and I don’t want to break it off because I know it’s due to my lack of communication. I dealt with verbally abusive, and toxic relationships that any form of affection is hard for me to comprehend. I can’t figure out how to go about relearning how to hold a conversation if my mind goes blank, or I think I’m talking too much. The bigger issue about this is we are hitting our 3 year mark in March. 3 years and this first year I haven’t been able to figure myself out, nor talk to anyone properly. I can talk in group forms because everyone else talks first, yet I can’t talk to my own boyfriend.

Lastly, I’m suicidal. I don’t yearn for suicide, I just feel like I would be best suited dead, not by murder but by hanging, or something. I’m not scared that I’ll inflict pain because, I know I won’t. I wouldn’t do that because I fear the aftermath, I fear what my family will see. However, I do wish I was alone so it’d be easier. I hope things get better for me.

TDLR; Constant fear of being kicked out now that I’m 18, despite not causing issues/problems. Homeschooling didn’t fix my problems, they worsened. My boyfriend and I lack communicated due to my insecurities. I’m suicidal but, wouldn’t want to hurt myself, and don’t yearn for it; although if I was homeless, alone, and forgotten about, I’d do it.

ALSO: I’ve dealt with depression and anxiety issues for a long ass time, anxiety prevents me from even asking for help in most cases.",4.026576313999803,5.136629814307462,5.110103954143593,83.323308073448,71.25266362252664,8.696512192752358,27.82956054276369,9.079978658526878,2.132805719097121,2576,91,528,51,47,849,282,657,0.209,0.6890000000000001,0.102,-0.9978,4,2,7,0,0,3,88.0,3,3,11,8,25,31,3,10,23,0,55,17,4,6,2,98,99,39,8,20,20,0,5,1,1,11,6,1,0,1,22,29,9,7,14,1,2,9,30,23,0,4,14,7,92,8,82,69,17,67,1,7,1,3,38,24,2,11,33,350,114,8,0.05240131060215752,0.062086984337836076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04645060013465251,0.11200212955507123,0.0,0.10854390875084667,0.05782614929061448,0.041905309156473294,0.0,0.05677679814440135,0.0,0.035634688126974325,0.0,0.08017371836391224,0.0,0.0,0.03664021476418683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979763035121034,0.0,0.0,0.08058674662638178,0.0,0.19166011543016745,0.0,0.04458965578354187,0.0,0.05499194257301339,0.04634470088027064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053426628523178685,0.05383058059374648,0.0,0.045139089154621885,0.0,0.11325440170858055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033794510286126386,0.0,0.04513317203724567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0513333350028153,0.0,0.0,0.04377457101878922,0.0,0.046412007660504316,0.0,0.0,0.10383171433258356,0.0,0.0,0.05007169788919344,0.04709491911320625,0.0,0.29639575223099685,0.3537962571537699,0.02649567712366564,0.03743550676445827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914505605794651,0.0,0.0,0.04048512258415572,0.04844416726822494,0.027377522005291057,0.0,0.11912348961553132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046941281633189,0.0,0.05377886245628834,0.05570014277433893,0.0,0.0,0.10537048177321534,0.0,0.0,0.10409265014110128,0.0,0.0,0.05609668678929386,0.0591547013603875,0.05660240756037605,0.21877341592298985,0.05200021511777158,0.13973007767394938,0.0,0.0,0.057596779788564985,0.042714062050518004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037012595369167116,0.025600633467776742,0.0,0.0925426345964392,0.04637351090982972,0.0,0.058623662827668524,0.0,0.0,0.047294228702206925,0.0,0.034978281729785524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052808196167186607,0.0,0.15873115732106452,0.0,0.0,0.05569430027523368,0.03852099266466004,0.0,0.040415121174712514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054986360627731205,0.0,0.0,0.039853558006431394,0.05575868904779673,0.0,0.0,0.05674551291169622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907235223891726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028195458937328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05573524403021199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387727472497452,0.0,0.0562593969436731,0.0,0.0,0.049845646162036766,0.0,0.052462853395305285,0.10606584780367796,0.04175706012936513,0.047704185116615616,0.05466599525924445,0.0,0.0,0.043346905630307096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040341088997947146,0.0,0.0,0.0370899173522726,0.0,0.0,0.08761968407754052,0.0,0.10956245477139613,0.05998696373574958,0.3439111723313512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29482731974953064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962620467362284,0.06715328792335444,0.1029680432212677,0.04160078733491899,0.03055562561229517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056997578520013026,0.10237693250015256,0.0545516123683206,0.06303232465119622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272295199288534,0.04159372127575309,0.04203317056672079,0.19143203795447808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585041919286227,0.060258921108945415,0.0505129934753503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07444877516944585,0.0,0.0,0.16872362991667675
mentalhealth,nuckleheab,2020/01/01,"SSRI’s causing major mood swings I can’t tell if this is normal, from what I’ve heard having mood swings like this isn’t normal. At first I thought it was psychosis because of the paranoia so I started a thread in the psychosis subreddit and a lot of people said it sounds like anxiety or mania/hypomania.

I’m honestly just concerned, I can’t see my doctor for 2 days and I really don’t have the ability to ween myself off of it. So I guess I’ll ask in here what you guys think?

Today I took notes on the moods that I experienced all in order

I started out the day very depressed and I was like that for most of the day, then around 11:00 I got super hyper like I was all over the place, my thoughts were rapid fire, my parents were telling me my mood was weird. 1:00 I started to get really irritable but also a little insane, like I was screaming at people, laughing hysterically when I got mad etc. Then I fell asleep.

Is this normal? Is this the process of my moods stabilizing? What do you guys think?",2.3576717656209456,4.456945876847293,3.8063987555094654,86.80234897588802,77.91625615763547,6.44117189525538,23.492092299714805,7.475848149327749,1.027656157635468,795,26,161,11,19,262,117,203,0.111,0.785,0.10400000000000001,-0.364,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,0,2,7,17,1,0,11,0,17,2,1,1,2,22,34,12,0,4,4,1,1,5,0,0,1,4,0,2,12,5,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,4,0,1,14,7,25,8,20,20,6,26,0,1,1,0,10,12,0,5,16,105,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049249057617658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003717668863012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680061735488342,0.12265933147644598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998159006022193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478408129170166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538498733272622,0.0,0.11300701314611435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13429427987407308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632869630825782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160324066673166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854940278974395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098738780115329,0.0,0.14453753314371606,0.2598279352531108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205016390665432,0.1315022731593572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154613358637464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38566028419928383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568806234669895,0.0,0.0,0.1819225990769365,0.0,0.13708171054082624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681070695372174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480637493108965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455371138301736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786035584441732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22935859402450565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814223659920802,0.0,0.20832485327493927,0.0,0.0,0.1243673715738897,0.0,0.14577401982741958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825819056038533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,steak5874,2020/01/01,Not excited Wasn't excited to ring in a New Year or decade. My life has pretty much been on rinse and repeat for five years now. With no change in sight. I try not to get hopeless or depressed. But I do more then I like to admit. I fear the day when I finally snap.,-0.5017293233082682,1.6093476491228105,1.6629072681704289,97.64368421052635,90.05263157894737,5.3624060150375925,16.914786967418543,6.868970318607317,-0.16842656641604006,204,5,49,3,7,68,47,57,0.19899999999999998,0.64,0.16,-0.364,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,8,6,6,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,2,6,3,8,4,2,12,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,2,10,33,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283218136663584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20015779622447785,0.0,0.2673143115585828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3492435040721137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399863697654855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215132056273146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21921783919686336,0.1516271824469793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281517600005856,0.0,0.0,0.2997495263804382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157497024931852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107154061770962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3997258684820238
mentalhealth,onehundopercentyours,2020/01/01,"Happy New Year firstly... Secondly, let’s all appreciate the fact that we’re all still breathing. Not sure what your situation is but just be happy you’re still alive, hopefully well, and working towards having a better year <3",3.9224390243902434,7.122026121951222,4.588487804878049,76.77053658536586,80.46341463414635,7.182439024390242,27.71219512195122,8.238735603445708,2.601649756097561,185,8,29,4,5,59,36,41,0.027999999999999997,0.545,0.4270000000000001,0.9691,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,3,4,6,0,0,2,0,4,1,1,0,4,9,5,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,1,3,2,7,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,6,21,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216398845679746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20812398033200144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5209310608323119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24302162821671475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25020103284247514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363126708530918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750296431284652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3908022086963133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23060722574950876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21999596213106345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17812935272015226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151307317502513
mentalhealth,SuryanshuBhandari,2020/01/01,"WhatsApp group invitation. Hello everyone, I hope you are doing good.
We have created a WhatsApp group for meditation, exercise, self improvement and to listen each other.
If anyone is interested into joining, just text me and I will add you. We have people from around the world and is quite helpful. 

Have a nice day/evening/night. :)",4.23268472906404,7.493153844827589,5.137980295566507,72.9836206896552,79.51724137931033,8.141871921182268,28.975369458128082,8.841846274778883,3.2739921182266007,265,12,40,7,7,86,47,58,0.0,0.665,0.335,0.9668,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,2,2,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,0,8,1,0,0,0,12,10,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,9,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,4,5,9,1,3,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,2,0,30,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24225879078483645,0.0,0.0,0.3084303693957203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22344348278997853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33106544438260643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29060129148064345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322304937628762,0.0,0.0,0.34412133928620403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3251371628653167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401975935805405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685118362366835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614421474815849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwitaway73647,2020/01/01,"ED shaping, would love to rant about my past and these came to fruition. I don't want this to start again but its not that easy. Would love to vent. Hi, I've had quite a serious issue with a certain ED for sometime and it always seems to show up in the same way. It's been three years and it seems to be showing up again. I want to be able to stop it this time.

I'd love to storytime and vent, I think it will help me in the long run. Cheers",1.093221649484537,2.308177948453608,2.1552448453608264,101.20647551546396,78.79381443298968,5.674742268041237,19.341494845360824,5.985473137389443,-0.5130608247422686,339,7,89,2,8,107,64,97,0.106,0.6759999999999999,0.218,0.9559,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,4,0,8,3,0,0,1,18,18,5,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,1,3,2,0,2,2,1,0,1,3,0,5,5,16,10,1,16,0,0,0,3,5,5,0,2,8,53,15,0,0.19843974842671994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16511776736783698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22696220724799035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13300998044005802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20711954109228334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756129328229335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5372988616804915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18943319379886875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21106509888326605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613041881839161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19626198528525468,0.0,0.14045667530021225,0.0,0.0,0.16590451522847918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271521781459878,0.0,0.0,0.1157118131178048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234089810037352,0.1575122356911378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819318075356305,0.0,0.0,0.12778869188409114
mentalhealth,AlertNScared,2020/01/01,"Backsliding into Skidsville It seems over the last month my depression paranoia and hallucinations and delusions are getting worse. The problem come in when no one believes me. Like tonight I was at an acquaintance s house I went to the bathroom and the lights started flickering and the toilet was wretching at me. I just stood in there the soap reeked of rotten flesh. I was so freaked I made an excuse to leave. 

I know this is a jumble but I can't even get a bit of sleep. They say I'm bipolar but I think they got it wrong. I do anything to avoid public places I think people are out to kill/hurt me and are following me. I guess the icing is I'm so lonely. No one gets this...I just want someone to hear a bit of my daily hell, get some convo to take my mind off this.",1.1411111111111083,3.5399508853503217,2.3173991507431,93.9832183297948,84.73248407643311,5.017551309271055,21.461075725406925,6.42735559955562,0.28826001415428193,607,20,129,6,18,193,99,157,0.23199999999999998,0.742,0.027000000000000003,-0.985,0,3,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,0,7,10,1,1,12,0,10,3,2,1,0,23,31,10,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,8,0,1,4,0,0,3,3,9,0,2,7,5,20,1,17,24,3,17,1,2,0,0,6,9,1,3,6,82,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328670213755722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819090323515579,0.0,0.0,0.3525428782145281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908265452630236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390644226920487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066421640596601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3374227088902837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913353282808535,0.0,0.17786532042905204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18197605703059955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18630203835003054,0.17284522693977922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786304903636448,0.0,0.08873365829026995,0.13161065601561758,0.0,0.1709617959202989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888072459895236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15277643452199133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630275896841343,0.0,0.1288750543170535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21881762951349368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193535919120556,0.0,0.16869031759427575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544944825714104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839869813815696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698623349057255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16157562999428393,0.0,0.1368037089589023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428152978109085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139709389107442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20691284913959965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523271692161828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14967413489146622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16454054154513098,0.0,0.17653009890518684,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Potato1009,2020/01/01,"If you need to talk, I will respond (Repost)

A little more info, I am not a professional but I research psychology as a hobby. I know the most about, and can help with anorexia, anxiety, depression, and suicidal thoughts. I can help with these the best due to having dealt with these issues in my personal life.

I am a somewhat dry and blunt person who will suggest ways to cope, so if that works for you, I’m here

Do not worry about hurting me with your issues I want to go into the psychology field so I see it as more of preparing myself for what I might hear and see.",4.080526315789474,5.07494560526316,5.493815789473686,81.0554605263158,71.01754385964912,8.50701754385965,27.407894736842106,8.841846274778883,2.0191789473684207,445,15,89,8,8,150,75,114,0.107,0.73,0.163,0.7181,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,3,0,2,5,3,0,0,7,0,9,1,0,0,0,22,18,11,1,4,5,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,2,6,9,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,3,15,1,17,14,5,6,0,2,2,0,12,3,0,5,1,71,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177589849251372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20820916540213072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088212640150005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127556201515726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236118697908168,0.0,0.2659674495512722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21239192128403456,0.0,0.0,0.41415731296472097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903576859196497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401361950607443,0.0,0.19884950003100327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21047165939930507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711151405057932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3464714626441773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161991459981003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21701802971258827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15946686865286647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575078967173205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702180079944148,0.15748114337468927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444379831227735,0.2014854167142747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PhoShizzity,2020/01/01,"Is it normal to not be able to remember most of last year? Like the title suggests, I just can't remember most of last year. I can't remember if anything substantial happened, or where most of the time went, or anything like that. Doesn't seem normal, but I thought I'd ask, if for no other reason than seeing what other people think could be the case.",6.025428571428571,5.859902542857142,6.406428571428571,80.30107142857145,66.42857142857143,9.285714285714286,30.357142857142854,8.841846274778883,2.3017142857142856,278,9,54,4,4,90,46,70,0.042,0.885,0.073,0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,1,0,20,14,5,0,5,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,1,3,2,7,9,3,7,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,8,7,37,8,0,0.17704156603090465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29138024784876465,0.0,0.1655099653842229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413532844723361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565572721523783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28862501147647185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17298713289555673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3469262904532205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227383302737696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18202821611095424,0.0,0.0,0.6016607463669366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107920647780653,0.16117199249833405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344108688748525,0.0,0.1405512276937104,0.1032343608831804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16411930541419892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228017927976308
mentalhealth,Karen-manager-slayer,2020/01/01,"so my boyfriend dumped me cried for a while, relapsed on self harm, every time i love something it leaves me, i don’t see the point any more",3.685517241379313,4.461577034482762,3.085689655172416,98.76577586206898,71.75862068965517,5.8000000000000025,24.84482758620689,3.1291,-0.04060000000000042,110,3,26,0,2,32,27,29,0.265,0.613,0.12300000000000001,-0.5945,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,5,1,2,3,1,4,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,2,14,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424938543286103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3916980594808968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004429828193471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775779863009811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3218369630353412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370934027289976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28415656172212594,0.0,0.3720017934179485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745208860554243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20793086219095225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Youreapizzapie,2020/01/01,"First depressed thought of 2020...for the first time I thought that I actually want to die and I don’t want to be here anymore I’ve been journaling since September of my freshman year of college, and for my final couple of pages I did a recap of my decade.

All the sudden all these memories good and bad flooded into my mind. My 8 year old self who was depressed but didn’t understand it yet and just wanted to love life, to my 13 year old self who was battling shit for the first time by myself

To my 15 year old self going away for high school and felt like everything was crashing down and having no familiar face to talk to... not that I would probably talk to a familiar face

To my current 18 year old self who had the shittiest first semester of college ever.

This December break I felt I was doing well. Probably because I didn’t do anything and just hung around with myself.

But now I’m seeing all these New Years parties with people from my grade and I very much could have been invited, I live close, and there’s people there who I thought I considered close if not best friends, but nope.

And I know it’s the smallest thing because so many other people weren’t there, but they could have gotten invited and just declined, but I didn’t even get anything.

And then my mind just went to, “what if I just died and then they wouldn’t have to deal with me” “what if no one had to deal with the burden I am” I don’t enjoy myself at school. I have no friends, I have no support system, I have nothing.

I honestly didn’t think I’d make it this far, and one of the things I tried to do is think of where I could imagine myself in 5 and 10 years, and I just don’t. I don’t see myself with a family or friends, I just think of darkness and no future.

I really just don’t want to deal with anything anymore.

I was at a high and now it all just came crashing down.

I’ve always wondered what it’d be like if I wasn’t here. If I did how people would respond. All the people who were assholes to me would probably post about me and act like they knew me.

I always found it funny in year books how people would be like, “I love how positive you always were” like,  no not really, just shows how much you don’t know me.

But I never actually thought about doing the action until now. And just realizing how much people probably wouldn’t give a flying shit.

Happy fucking 2020.",3.7913262696382897,4.735004774327127,4.681971136280602,86.79739587139206,71.65010351966873,7.752746315917671,26.007124588966022,8.027739517013583,1.3852545853123854,1858,57,391,25,34,603,189,483,0.151,0.731,0.11800000000000001,-0.9529,2,0,0,0,0,1,42.0,0,2,3,5,33,25,4,0,14,0,51,8,4,6,7,102,84,41,2,18,26,0,2,5,3,6,1,0,0,4,23,31,0,0,17,2,0,5,25,8,1,6,30,4,58,17,47,41,10,55,0,2,2,3,26,15,3,7,37,282,81,6,0.0,0.0,0.11910496906674001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233533604703667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104260805371694,0.0,0.0,0.15065737120734035,0.054325997657776126,0.0,0.0,0.05733585078168391,0.0,0.050954085339753125,0.07440165596171243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404292697205981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979738292705476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461726689255804,0.06752400807897742,0.0,0.0,0.18874509902367914,0.1051230527803611,0.0,0.1266705185284158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040307037644994166,0.05520142889996566,0.0,0.0,0.054846152443471664,0.0,0.057529796265928086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718888643189905,0.06685090088344911,0.0,0.2076344296242745,0.0,0.06691175984557902,0.1414453987874408,0.0564174699313804,0.031883518937940634,0.05854161308894359,0.034682430685073866,0.0511856374949542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496321538545334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289544477851544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707648774049756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04310440459757845,0.14907088410619995,0.0,0.053886996093953456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015653178477493,0.0,0.0407352684341814,0.06187069379063787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12323754403361288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458319553843456,0.0,0.047066943498541534,0.05893920362672653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058556005998537435,0.0,0.25614570523422536,0.0,0.08270547121731851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961537721553785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844595213701801,0.0,0.263185007880148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818952050729593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235229567695618,0.097259497566656,0.0,0.2546533312653565,0.0,0.1252844381763217,0.05048126292430418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925147885811532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09810062879675774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108580516744189,0.11730881597878685,0.0,0.1937910217834602,0.0711693971194293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04143258667304021,0.0,0.0,0.06353012393540965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035276644942049,0.1439786500899324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486962151581437,0.05657162945584258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617999561133824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17340422062762034,0.0,0.0,0.3143894790002859
mentalhealth,Pawpawgit,2020/01/01,"Help after terminal diagnosis A lot has happened these last few weeks in my life. The two main things: I got engaged a little over two weeks ago and then yesterday found out I’m terminal. I’d rather not share details further than I’ve got at most 10 years left. I’m writing here because I feel stuck now. It seems a lot of people get fearless when they find out their timeline, but I just feel frozen. I haven’t told my fiancé yet and I don’t know how to. I don’t know what to do, and maybe this isn’t the best place to get advice, especially with something this big, but I don’t know where to go. How do I tell my fiancé and how do I start to unstick myself so I don’t completely plummet?",2.7665642633228846,3.933121255172416,3.9550470219435763,90.18510971786837,74.3793103448276,6.9278996865203775,24.905956112852664,7.348242739294969,0.9215517241379308,542,17,121,6,11,177,93,145,0.023,0.89,0.08800000000000001,0.8593,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,1,11,4,0,0,5,0,10,1,0,3,0,27,28,12,0,1,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,8,0,0,1,7,0,0,2,5,2,16,4,14,23,6,24,0,0,0,0,7,11,0,4,12,78,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16526159767386778,0.14991421414815553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309366475699418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748045948632762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731855621717754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17102378022256784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15457214005153255,0.0,0.0,0.18543077969583036,0.0,0.0,0.17671589537484658,0.0,0.0961144973398089,0.0,0.27052059361010444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14955179685391526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335722196378245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27883092859199554,0.13785494755323813,0.0,0.0,0.18374880889312584,0.0,0.11945408955465707,0.0,0.1695021473524807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28755866674403263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990324797192682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11724615268861978,0.0,0.17669386042676086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539600221009947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019643745133047,0.0,0.0,0.11970363776932028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781787898749044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235546717918507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16160090974847094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3304103141438121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27131489002935216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890739974880644
mentalhealth,donttextspeaktome,2020/01/01,"What is best economically - walking into a mental health facility or asking for help from home? I don’t know what my insurance covers, if anything, but I won’t last the night. Trying to keep it together in case I do survive and need to pay bills. Mental health in this country is so fucked up.",4.782894736842106,5.951765491228072,6.114868421052632,76.60282894736844,69.52631578947367,8.50701754385965,28.285087719298247,8.841846274778883,2.2190035087719293,231,8,43,4,4,78,47,57,0.156,0.7709999999999999,0.073,-0.7949,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,1,2,1,0,2,0,5,3,0,0,0,8,10,5,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,8,9,1,7,0,0,0,1,2,4,1,2,2,29,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19846641101765772,0.0,0.2254659954473833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25309820087829965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229623287512695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5127153275639268,0.0,0.0,0.16165446617972956,0.0,0.2419181105366316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143673516103842,0.0,0.0,0.13254342962620866,0.1965897502681684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4860951919928095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17882814842839426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263263262569296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374194060892427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,silverfighty70,2020/01/01,There's no good left There's no good left in this world.,-1.8761538461538485,0.0006371538461564796,-1.254999999999999,115.63750000000002,100.53846153846158,2.6,6.5,3.1291,-3.0582000000000003,45,0,13,0,2,13,8,13,0.256,0.40700000000000003,0.337,0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6110743379522751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7915732142361745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,INeefHelp393939,2020/01/01,"I don’t like certain feelings. It’s something wrong with my brain that needs to be diagnosed. I am perfectly normal mentally or I used to think... in around November I developed some sort of feeling that would drive me insane. That feeling would be trigged by me imagining a number two mechanical pencil lead dragging vertically across a piece of paper on a hard wooden table or surface. As a student, I hear the sound often. Not only was it the sound that irritated me but the physical image that accompanies the sound. I had always dreaded the sound. That visual footage would appear in my brain at least three times an hour for 3 weeks and I would grind my mouth and try to forget about it. I disposed of all my mechanical pencils thinking it would aid the dissolution of the terror. I would often write in pen and press down hard, as I generally like the texture of writing in pen and the delicate ink. I almost always use a pen, I would rather not write than write with a mechanical pencil or full pencil. The thought of the mechanical pencil grinding vertically on paper on hard surfaces would drive me mad and did for nearly a month. I almost hurt myself one day where I would keep attacking my body. I eventually stopped thinking about. Recently I have developed a new dreadful feeling, toilet paper. I have always hated the soft texture of the outer exterior of an entire roll of toilet paper. Not the individual layered strings that you roll out, but when the toilet paper is on the outer shelf of the cardboard roll and you grip the exterior to change it or give it to a family member. I always hold a complete toilet paper roll by putting two fingers inside the cardboard roll and extending my fingers inside. I would use that method to distribute or change rolls, I would never touch the dreadful outsides of the roll. Recently, this December I developed the terrorizing thought of touching the outsides of the toilet paper roll. It drives me mad every time I think of it. I will be doing something semi-productive and the thought would appear.  I have noticed that applying lotion to my hand or wetting my hand and then facing my fear and compressing and grasping the soft outsides of the toilet paper roll helps. To note, applying lotion to my hand also helped me get rid of the grim mechanical pencil image. But being winter and all, my hands are awfully dry rather frequently (however many say my hands are always dry year-long). The past week, I have had a headache. My life is on loop. The image of my dry hand touching the soft toilet paper roll appears in my mind and I immediately must rise and apply lotion or mentally and physically recoil until insanity. This has been going on every 30 minutes on average or every 15 minutes when I’m not engaged in a serious mind focusing activity. I cannot do this anymore. After doing some WebMD-style searching on Reddit, I have found maybe it could be a sensory disorder. As I am writing this, come to think of it, I do not like the feeling of dry towels, stacks of paper, cardboard boxes, Kleenex tissues especially, etc.  I know that there are more like me, I don’t know what to do though because this isn’t something that is widely known It will end up driving me to psychiatric hospitals if I don’t end this end-able disorder quickly. I need help.",7.141207441207443,7.697761077922081,7.664336609336612,69.7661670761671,64.03246753246754,10.165952965952966,34.99280449280449,10.030559657594573,3.680293664443664,2648,113,434,54,37,875,271,616,0.131,0.794,0.075,-0.9925,2,0,4,0,0,2,61.0,0,2,0,2,14,21,4,6,47,1,50,15,13,4,6,106,82,36,0,20,19,0,25,4,0,15,2,6,0,0,29,20,0,3,19,0,0,12,11,14,0,4,9,31,60,7,67,52,9,65,0,2,0,0,13,30,0,19,27,311,89,21,0.06574049423483452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165921756293858,0.0,0.0,0.05257264948821079,0.2735067878228679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519690528319519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05852297766315932,0.0,0.07478930279801678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040074795104348235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07302286896134487,0.0,0.1467762665057525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908945204399153,0.056629614722134874,0.06892765743998011,0.0,0.0,0.05248843529381343,0.0,0.0,0.04239718020607438,0.0,0.0,0.06672521782182475,0.0,0.0,0.1506886037648786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17467969523877833,0.0,0.07331802878668049,0.0,0.0,0.16616760527134478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06197428721044568,0.07397633295952273,0.1662018458298504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720810587136082,0.0,0.0,0.034346694898863626,0.06306427240879517,0.037361837863940615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17667171025615616,0.06490512776033935,0.0,0.0,0.07409431487624679,0.0,0.1321934026063957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474114440718616,0.0,0.07037655875563259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058433171869172275,0.0,0.0,0.07225851273802475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04643445525545329,0.12846993921004676,0.0,0.0,0.05817826866511953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665054277554326,0.06604516258188704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250191171890285,0.0,0.13275831733776536,0.0,0.05247343529734523,0.0,0.0,0.097491486960704,0.0507031219268194,0.06349257898695193,0.0,0.0,0.06441172632157814,0.0,0.07484598841142111,0.0,0.0,0.04454746027088731,0.04999860824571768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275674043912448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608735435235508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298216141291608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05227947964577029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183073275579284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054961996844792776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106192711043424,0.06458970180300448,0.1565718274139817,0.07666762171876468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04463348026607607,0.0,0.12843782080002433,0.0,0.0,0.1703360385675516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054661181394021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5604019310100157,0.07187691033011283,0.0,0.04233472290046483
mentalhealth,Kay1130,2020/01/01,"I relapsed after being clean for ten months I used to cut myself almost daily. The last time I had cut myself was February 12th, 2019. For ten months I was able to ignore the urge, but then I fucked up. I’ve been having nightmares lately, so bad to the point I don’t wanna sleep. So instead of sleeping I stay up and just think. And when I think too much I make myself upset and get the urge to do it. 
I gave in and cut myself again, hoping the urge would go away if I just did it once, but it just reminded me how good it felt and instead of becoming a slip up, it turned into a relapse. I did it again the next day and the next, and I just am so mad at myself. The nightmares haven’t gone away and I’m falling into a shitty mental state again. Back in November 2018 I tried to kill myself because I was in such a bad place, and I’m scared I’ll get there again.
I’m terrified of doctors so going to the psychiatrist just makes me feel worse. Plus I don’t have the money for it. I want to at least tell a friend. I recently moved across the state and none of my new friends know I used to cut and about my bad mental health. I want to tell my one friend who I became very close too, but I’m scared I’ll freak her out or be a burden or make her uncomfortable if I talk about things like that.",2.569347826086954,3.401605789855072,3.8579420289855086,91.98234782608696,74.43478260869566,6.679420289855073,20.684057971014493,6.742157984588678,0.12554840579710147,1002,19,233,8,20,329,138,276,0.266,0.6459999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.9964,0,0,0,0,0,4,24.0,0,0,0,0,24,22,7,3,17,0,17,5,2,6,0,46,42,26,1,7,12,0,2,1,3,1,2,0,1,0,10,16,0,1,5,0,1,5,4,16,0,3,10,2,35,6,35,29,3,43,0,0,0,1,10,17,1,6,19,161,45,1,0.11352979910726432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368369446042124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133299668674612,0.08729740773720689,0.2843779203350669,0.06920671179029031,0.1253847435306582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321732833824082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620256005577805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05740407761741838,0.0,0.10900641099293666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631385235022877,0.10495646987985527,0.11862926852777722,0.0,0.12904320225581087,0.09522340910633788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12067686755827585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127607069676556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256039018730523,0.0,0.062393008528606325,0.09254193889285796,0.12806655840297335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05546492523215125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22734606743231014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22882267001279374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812368050199108,0.12066420952087027,0.08345746524994731,0.0,0.0,0.10964778742675216,0.2414804586361305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209055308374218,0.07693073004937692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861447648109735,0.0,0.10732235623039267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209698028140716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22732626867991498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272235779408577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100766022791486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125095209006162,0.1984600968964047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754241538843516,0.14549062227113094,0.0,0.0,0.06620013884190566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707928130209647,0.1234878205262136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961065901555538,0.0,0.09367397406590301,0.1339256339382647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569656441238592,0.0806483119567345,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Blurry_fxce,2020/01/01,"My year in pixels [My year in pixels ](https://imgur.com/gallery/5Vj2oDO)

For anyone wondering this was recorded through an app called Daylio.",11.359000000000002,15.9315889,6.0100000000000025,69.785,60.0,8.0,30.0,8.841846274778883,3.0370000000000004,118,4,14,2,2,30,16,20,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,4,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3346214978738581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4886650460916503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5189797962892729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6163561445564129
mentalhealth,vanduran5,2020/01/01,"Money problems My family keeps telling me I should sell my car for a newer one. I always lie and tell them it's sentimental reasons.

But really, it's because I'm in a financial hole. I owe tons to the hospital for going there to get diagnosed for a stomach infection and another time when I checked myself in for suicidal thoughts and got yelled at by a psychiatrist who said ""You're young, life's gonna get harder. You better learn how to cope other than coming here.""

I currently owe $3100. I know it's my fault. That's why I don't ask for help. I owe 2k for the suicidal thoughts to debt collectors because the only number they gave me was for a plumbing company. I can't go to college or buy a better car because of a stupid mistake I made. I ruined my own life.",3.291666666666668,4.633223681528662,5.220780254777072,80.9350345010616,73.33121019108279,8.800212314225053,29.006900212314225,9.2995712137729,2.583106581740976,606,25,121,14,12,209,103,157,0.184,0.754,0.062,-0.9621,5,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,2,2,4,7,1,0,10,0,4,5,1,3,0,17,23,7,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,6,4,0,1,5,0,8,5,2,5,0,1,7,2,21,2,18,14,2,13,0,1,0,0,10,3,0,1,5,71,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404500604607423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769951390318368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577995265742455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30868561472427386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985690047891346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145401013168701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713222723269453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591238823541683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763757094868243,0.0,0.19185894539163487,0.0,0.1349999147715901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313900431485115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003178874034526,0.0,0.0,0.0927647222546405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384482703337414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971688521086086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437912635043412,0.12837537976592914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16151298212825754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813370522833253,0.17354825891469322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160561668162651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3692662969318694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950666461096078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680070307308598,0.09842509020978588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523102555723567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UselessReality1672,2020/01/01,"I just can't I tried to go watch the new years ball drop with my mom but I just can't be around her when she's drunk. She screams at me for not knowing what channel it's on, she screams at me for having the lights off she throws stuff on the ground and she even ripped part of the chain for the light off and threw it at me because SHE broke it. I can't stand it anymore",1.9432931726907647,2.6044141927710847,2.3158433734939763,103.097781124498,75.74698795180723,5.533333333333334,21.062248995983936,3.1291,-0.6974883534136547,290,6,78,0,6,88,52,83,0.168,0.8320000000000001,0.0,-0.9178,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,5,0,5,1,0,0,0,9,8,4,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,4,1,0,1,3,0,3,4,3,0,0,1,5,15,0,14,6,1,17,0,1,1,0,8,9,0,0,3,54,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33295055902680304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988678380396136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20465580958052831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217442425011115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190801154579866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18450655062589227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39319891772117777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3242468269917713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635591742895583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3843266169405197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22793631294846495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21619691294745727
mentalhealth,fabluous,2020/01/01,"Can drinking once cause short-term depression? I know alcohol is a depressant, but i don't have a good understanding of alcohol.

I got drunk exactly a year ago (4 or 5 shots) but i was fine afterwards.

I got drunk 3 days agos for the second time and had 8-11 shots. I puked, remember pretty much everything as far as i can tell, and my heart was racing the entirety of the next day, but i didn't feel awful or anything except for feeling tired. But ever since i have felt depressed, and sad. 

For the past year I've been struggling with an eating disorder/ocd and believe I developed anxiety in the second half of the past year as a result (hormones? I lost my period too (but also, ocd is kind of already an anxiety thing so i dont know)). I also used to self harm when i was younger (13-15) and im feeling in the same headspace again as i was at the time, except i know better i guess. But it's tempting.

I am 18.

I have just felt despondent and i hate that i can't help it and want to know if the drinking is what i can point to as a cause, but i have a history of mental health issues, so i dont know. I just want someone to reassure me that it was probably just the drinking, if it really was, and that this funk will pass.

I don't plan to drink again.",2.203387651638604,3.522856038022816,4.190103204780012,87.32789607097591,76.07224334600761,8.051348904580845,25.07133804091979,8.704169506293173,1.6446843744341841,970,33,215,20,21,332,139,263,0.213,0.7020000000000001,0.085,-0.9895,0,0,6,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,0,3,12,13,1,1,18,1,26,12,1,4,2,47,45,29,0,4,16,0,5,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,10,9,9,0,12,6,0,1,6,8,0,3,14,5,29,5,24,30,2,24,0,5,0,0,4,5,0,5,18,143,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17234374430834104,0.20777843905216614,0.0,0.0,0.10727498739292844,0.15547953881089815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873261893177475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799965427848016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095237444084728,0.0,0.08597541533803975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19972538117752328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538637655690513,0.0,0.2511836178282874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278616279346365,0.3809199078838035,0.0,0.09947133649429367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793310476725881,0.0,0.0,0.0873671672092503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14745872572927796,0.0,0.18667601244251456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153615067789556,0.155497369879833,0.0,0.10708910735204498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597594404009394,0.0,0.1033309702825282,0.0,0.11519575174056775,0.06515862484634967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500478817866338,0.10146324683103086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10123051580758943,0.2671236932377937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611751897898504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796603522063846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714614245139646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338522452570106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035267658726874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18559819898250268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189601475973258,0.0,0.0,0.09889874849076608,0.10481012598892744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622759902730893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012135058118208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014124928634863,0.0,0.0,0.08041411735102999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236674265403839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162626336462148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496688217717878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458280829874169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336927644511237,0.11172998539006317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120029780411696,0.0,0.08395927342821469,0.0,0.0,0.11467538046478355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780249586985728
mentalhealth,joeclemskdh999,2020/01/01,"Tonight my brother had a really disturbing outburst. I was watching tv with him then he jumps up falls to the floor jumps up from the floor falls down on all fours then jumps back up and repeats this. Then he runs upstairs, then downstairs, upstairs, downstairs etc. He was out of breath. He was yelling and ranting about a comment someone made about his cousin years ago. He was totally fine before this. He was in a great mood and I have no idea how what we were watching could have triggered this. Anyways, I’d appreciate whatever advice you could give me. I think my brother might be manic. 

Ive been manic myself before and I see similarities. I’m now stable.",3.235052307692307,5.911570696000003,3.4528,87.43378461538461,78.04,5.766153846153848,27.215384615384608,7.010146845296331,1.4066923076923077,527,22,97,6,13,162,83,125,0.046,0.866,0.08800000000000001,0.6486,0,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,1,1,0,0,6,4,0,1,5,0,15,1,1,3,2,17,20,9,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,1,0,6,1,1,0,1,9,4,13,2,13,7,3,25,0,0,3,0,15,9,0,1,10,66,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23671513513962314,0.2147320609320387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18626840274106213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4122585566125871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3868195091353181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701627867860602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23237967335655546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670715955175626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734606420608801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229214323811426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25697945637431696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15518580951797106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19303474129610865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20525004227269214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521827352438314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15599528391416598
mentalhealth,Velzee,2020/01/01,"I hate being alone without a significant other on NYE/NYD. Even since I was very young, I’ve always been depressed and envious during the countdown. I can’t do it. Even with my friends, I’m still really depressed. I miss having someone to love. Forgive me.",2.166190476190476,4.935646469387759,3.7296938775510218,82.86828231292519,84.3061224489796,5.715646258503401,26.534013605442176,7.1686216300943375,1.7216911564625843,203,9,35,3,6,67,42,49,0.312,0.524,0.16399999999999998,-0.7558,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,8,2,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,4,10,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,6,3,4,7,0,3,0,3,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880947444259438,0.0,0.0,0.2314553179757061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4791657058545358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3674503286053188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21490936116384085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27463005769627064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510545066524179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17819943291879667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301007185559165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356880519756365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221426928345295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22951501349447664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681408494119095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,concerned_friend_92,2020/01/01,"My friend told me she wants to die, how can I help her Cross posting to relevant subreddits as I really need advice here, Apologies in advance for grammar mistakes and as this will be long and I'm on mobile, I am typing this out in bed while this is still fresh in my mind, also happy new year.

*TLDR: among another stressful life events, my friends mum has been recently diagnosed with potentially fatal cancer, my friend is not coping and tonight she broke down and openly talked about wanting to die and also talked about how and when she would do it. I am scared for my friend and need some advice on the next steps would appreciate any and all support on this. I live in Northern Ireland UK.*

So some background about my friend which is relevant to this. She is in a relationship with my brother and is like a sister to me. Her mum has recently been diagnosed with stage 2 pancreatic cancer, as far as we know it has not spread to other systems and she is receiving chemo at present, we are waiting to find out how effective the chemo will be to determine whether she may be a candidate for the very life  threatening surgery to remove as much cancer as possible. Going by the little info the doctors have said the prognosis is not going to be great and we are looking at months to years if we are lucky and perhaps months or weeks if not, her mum may day on the operation table or soon after due to high risk complications of the surgery. 


During a small new years eve get together my friend was hosting she suddenly got up and was absent for quite some time. I went to check on her and found her with her boyfriend(my brother) very upset and sobbing/struggling to breathe. When I asked her what was wrong she said several times how she wanted to die, wanted to kill herself, didn't want to be in this planet anymore. I am a newly qualified nurse so when I heard my friend talk about killing herself (which I have never heard her say before) I naturally tried to be an active listener, ask her what was getting to her and making her want to die etc. I also had to ask if she had any Intentions of harming herself in this moment or later on, and asked if she had made any sort of plans or how she would try it if she felt like it.

She told me that she would slit her wrists with a knife as soon as her mum was dead and that there wouldn't be a reason for her to exist anymore after that. I listened to her, hugged her and I didnt try to fight her or be judgemental I just made sure that she heard me when I told her that I loved her very much and that so many people In her life would be devastated if she wasn't here anymore.

She mentioned other things too, feeling pressure from multiple places and people, work, friendship issues and feeling lack of family support. I mentioned perhaps she reach out to HR in her job and let them know that she is not coping and perhaps be granted some leave of absence for mental health reasons. I broached the issue of seeking professional mental health support through the health service  as she was clearly struggling to cope, but she says she's already on some sort of 9 month waiting list. (I'm living in Northern Ireland and the mental health services are notoriously difficult to be seen by even when you are in crisis and suicidal.) 

I suggested her opening up to a counsellor, or talk to her doctor about her depressive feelings in hopes a medical professional may signpost her to some real help or perhaps try medications that might help. She is not the type to open up to medical staff, in the past she has been seen by counsellors for anxiety and she was not honest during the initial session and pretended that she didn't have a problem and did not return for a second.

After her going through cycles of being more normal, apologising and then getting so upset she could barely breathe and talking about wanting to die again, she eventually went to sleep. And now I'm lying here not knowing what to do but knowing that there is something seriously wrong and that my friend needs help.

What do i do reddit? Do I broach this subject with her tomorrow when she's sober? Do I wait for her to talk to me? Where can I go to get some real genuine mental health support for my friend(live in Northern Ireland UK) ? Do I get family members involved or try to get other friends to reach out and let her know she is loved? How do I let my friend feel safe enough to open up to me and tell me what she needs from me? Being a nurse I would feel icky sharing some of the details of this with people who aren't medical professionals able to help and to be honest I feel torn between respecting my friends wishes to remain silent and being vocal to others who may be able to help. All I know is something needs to be done ASAP because I can see my friend drowning in front of my eyes and I can see she needs help. I'm scared I will lose her someday soon.",7.525154187858112,6.707297069400635,7.3030532844052445,77.27136097341146,63.58464773922187,10.07661966995,34.86557651451748,9.18150861145379,2.9529155604197506,3887,147,739,55,49,1235,364,951,0.10400000000000001,0.769,0.127,0.9590000000000001,1,0,2,0,1,1,66.0,4,1,1,6,40,53,3,8,28,0,95,27,5,13,5,168,172,85,11,33,27,7,7,2,12,15,19,9,1,0,38,57,0,4,19,1,1,12,16,22,0,1,36,22,127,31,136,100,16,104,0,3,6,3,134,44,0,31,47,542,165,15,0.08402989893629961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211304471504867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046364541506006184,0.10079801973028876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571481917704897,0.044056337868284313,0.032141321343160785,0.0,0.1250026203561028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15711322460578475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025611923227122156,0.0,0.035751627450145686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03354551836276399,0.0,0.0,0.027096166596909672,0.0,0.03618741441180889,0.08528857860486733,0.21802442121443272,0.0,0.0,0.08600816221299493,0.0,0.04299588058480085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043412674104535136,0.04685777480730386,0.027750477871287232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792159102476523,0.0,0.12746412515446398,0.0,0.04034094031334857,0.0,0.03840090264890154,0.0,0.0,0.046067223477888886,0.4219883945745537,0.0,0.13170646196411392,0.0,0.09551225607055994,0.0,0.03360319322835719,0.046321630114436636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044725694973656256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22329963288515767,0.0,0.0,0.1971321449396328,0.0443911008938959,0.0,0.04173032492343903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770538283636446,0.04169335433408297,0.0,0.09296663310771362,0.0,0.1385419046510494,0.0,0.0,0.044487765006978236,0.0,0.12888939729330326,0.08902920401708067,0.04105276410613205,0.04211001709035237,0.0741999402598674,0.037181908145957114,0.03528197581782677,0.04700398144700093,0.0,0.0,0.07584026453630459,0.0795111221314838,0.02804530502141941,0.04259656425362522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16930256556917894,0.16936474816926705,0.044571221818298284,0.042423121847076334,0.0,0.1006077954584336,0.0,0.061771644322270974,0.18692131596684866,0.032404519169312224,0.08115660001612124,0.044683375408586766,0.0,0.041165729860354654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04010802335797567,0.08738362735715959,0.0,0.04389667976806513,0.0,0.0,0.04736554266317862,0.040238707585747366,0.0,0.0,0.04020263239815167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04468807048173218,0.0,0.09564442147558136,0.02691585248356433,0.08639673126642095,0.08296938775705362,0.04510833207289447,0.0,0.0,0.07993167654165594,0.0668239483473282,0.08412858796962795,0.0,0.06696095006454034,0.0,0.0,0.04746493381910938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04204529216218122,0.0,0.0,0.06469032153058775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03355319291818718,0.0,0.048127982662069135,0.08784629521531713,0.0,0.04595753541591431,0.1907122670271169,0.03959859264722832,0.0,0.0,0.2026201493069945,0.036722917719022995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02791286551238352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04899850982030316,0.0,0.0,0.12044125418376316,0.0,0.14262696377578946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10400020041807312,0.17347054036283654,0.0,0.033701858160665614,0.0,0.0,0.0778965581734826,0.0,0.0,0.0483151183873887,0.0,0.0,0.03058738360844613,0.0,0.0,0.1790772878062973,0.09187350325231478,0.0,0.08116874982978127
mentalhealth,Soflo3,2020/01/01,"Depression and anxiety help This is my first time ever posting and I just started using Reddit last week. But I always search these communities and there have been helpful stories so I thought I would add to that:
12/31/2019
I have been struggling for months to a year in silence after a relapse in major depression and anxiety. I started journaling my suicidal thoughts so that if I wasn’t able to tell anyone that if the worst happened they might know what was going on. I wrote down my wishes for my body after death, researched the most environmentally conscious one so my last act would be a good one. 

I made the poor choice in 2018 to stop going to treatment just when things started to get better during . (Bi-Weekly copays add up quick even with the good insurance I am blessed to have due to a parent with a good job and my age) 

I have tried finding help but each therapist or psychiatrist I have been turned away because they weren’t accepting patients. They didn’t ask what treatment I was looking for and what I needed they just denied me immediately. I have avidly avoided the emergency just because i feel observation would make the problems in my mind worse. 

I live in a more rural part of my state so a good doc can be 1.5-2 hour trip=not good. I’ve been experiencing every side effect of it. Naturally things can get very bad very quickly. I’ve had persistent thoughts of suicide everyday as soon as I wake up and until I fall asleep which have gotten more prominent as time passes. 

I stopped leaving my house 6 weeks ago because every time I did my commute to school or work I was scared a bad day would tempt me into trying to hurt myself and indirectly possibly others physically on the roads. I dropped out of school for the second time since 2018 and Had to leave my job of 3 years because the illness I was taking over and I didn’t have the courage to ask for help. This has been a struggle I have battled in mostly silence until the last few years. I am vocal with some friends about this but have only talked with my mom a handful of times about it and the last conversation where I was open about what was happen 1.5 years ago. I have been lying and trying to pretend that I’m okay because she hasn’t dealt well with learning that I am suffering so badly. She didn’t understand what was going because I tried so hard to hide the signs when I could. 

Christmas was REALLY hard this year and my anxiety plus trying to detox from weed has kept me awake for last 4 days straight. This morning after another night distracting myself with tv in hopes I would just exhaust myself, my mom came down the stairs to start her day. I don’t know what she even said I think she asked about when school was starting again but the exhaustion mixed with the thoughts in my head exploded. Just created word vomit I started to just tell her everything because I couldn’t stop the honestly. I sobbed and she sobbed she showed anger and she showed compassion. We had the best conversation I have ever had and it was something I never thought she was capable of. 

I haven’t started any treatment as this all happened today. But the hardest part is admitting to others what is going on and I was able to do that. Somewhat against my will and subconsciously maybe some part in my brain knew what it was deciding, I don’t know and there’s no way to really find out.

Life is hard and the holidays can be hard when you’re alone and even when you’re with people. Things become out of our control and that is okay and that is normal. Human beings have a collective knowledge that is so vast and immeasurable that with all that knowledge we can still not fully understand when someone is sick and that it’s okay and we can be helped and be better. 

This happened at 7 am the morning of the last day of the year. The last day of the decade. 6 weeks ago I thought I wouldn’t make it to Christmas and my family would have to bury me. I thought I would be starting 2020 in a dark place figuratively and possibly literally. But I’m still here. Please don’t give up if you find this story to connect with you on some level. The world needs our voices and our compassion and even our weaknesses. 

I don’t know what my future holds but for the first time in a long time the darkness isn’t as dark.",5.073248226365287,6.235592453349284,5.275398449100808,82.91313397129187,68.8444976076555,8.253555518891272,29.00709453885497,8.53829466247534,2.034101039432437,3425,122,664,52,58,1080,340,836,0.161,0.736,0.10300000000000001,-0.9945,6,2,1,0,0,3,51.0,7,2,4,9,41,39,2,5,41,3,89,14,6,6,5,146,146,64,3,19,20,3,6,0,1,10,8,2,0,1,42,54,0,7,28,5,1,8,17,21,1,5,43,10,97,18,95,84,18,123,1,6,1,0,45,38,2,14,73,469,139,8,0.0934641936946842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124275552605379,0.0,0.0,0.04840035867084575,0.0,0.0,0.03888484820721362,0.0,0.0,0.03177942836807656,0.04900267819102419,0.10724977853052824,0.0,0.0,0.03267616869103448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13106460654870578,0.0,0.04390634331463632,0.0,0.11705804659962388,0.1994121674054912,0.05161192941350801,0.0,0.0,0.049042452500028255,0.08266148403581099,0.0,0.05190882460028908,0.0,0.052168475313983824,0.0,0.05344906922070791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05241402032514485,0.037311776707273384,0.0,0.0,0.15069168208311318,0.0,0.0805005730748069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346443690706906,0.08454371412291435,0.07874761426539133,0.0,0.04199979534339132,0.0,0.044054861857562855,0.0,0.023629152308417053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813686968545931,0.07950059541049291,0.0,0.0,0.0361051021002781,0.0,0.0488311836131375,0.04482968557077503,0.10623571031975593,0.19598332823116588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16530015562793887,0.0,0.16745111862375672,0.0,0.04796061357563987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15661769723224736,0.0,0.0,0.04641551663108746,0.04602170193057722,0.053922565390406,0.05002767621129617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274879048030034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273095310953667,0.2666502732632417,0.0,0.09896508595846022,0.0,0.0,0.03300826203557182,0.0,0.0,0.041265297687906745,0.041356435136571015,0.03924319157242272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04421903997178573,0.06238807505255994,0.0,0.0469486725038913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04957536974300225,0.04718609599250029,0.10946413404323416,0.037301113853338064,0.0,0.0,0.06930251534411024,0.03604267403105695,0.0,0.0,0.04385490717217118,0.04578753274674192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06333375651986291,0.035541865481338475,0.0,0.0,0.051890463178172745,0.15181892062823554,0.0,0.03239815183420604,0.0,0.04882509478568031,0.05129780895307918,0.0,0.10536683513760048,0.044756430835041855,0.0,0.0,0.04471630537536978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05987555576827368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044452925644320435,0.0,0.046786981424399215,0.14188613075126533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038657273428285316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03959595400736672,0.03597665127676583,0.0,0.0,0.2646177494186495,0.0,0.07464062581719566,0.11721037646747008,0.0,0.09770906850178313,0.0,0.1022346580495002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0351367209479898,0.0375614892655269,0.08169182489024811,0.0,0.0,0.054259566315814016,0.09314018588076987,0.02994404070040988,0.0,0.2597004540964193,0.1907490303687708,0.0,0.04429656357062035,0.0,0.0,0.15864013091971618,0.05083110191048477,0.0,0.09729952182799263,0.0,0.04036152726251485,0.0,0.07711774816032574,0.0,0.03709376327736003,0.14994267701724007,0.0,0.042017767364971294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05373960507513796,0.0,0.0,0.03402152308145226,0.0,0.04762399912216895,0.2323799855369368,0.0,0.0,0.18056362918625027
mentalhealth,rundontwalkawaypoker,2020/01/01,"Do you think he thinks I'm a freak? I have known this guy for almost two years. Yesterday he skew if we could pick up his buddy from the store since his car broke down and it was really cold out. I said sure and we pick his buddy up from the store. Well my friend wanted to stop at the gas station and his buddy stayed in the car with me. I have never met his buddy before; I only saw him once and he just kind of looked at me for a couple seconds and looked away. He was smoking in the car and he had burrowed my friend's lighter and my friend told his buddy to give the lighter back to me when he was done using it. He gave the lighter back to me and he rolled down the window and was like ""oh your back windows roll down all the way; in most cars the back ones don't roll down all the way."" We didn't talk at all anymore and it was kind of uncomfortable. We all went back to my friend's house and I get anxious really bad. They sat on the couch and smoked and I just stood awkwardly as if I were frozen or something. My friend kept telling me he wanted me to stay and hangout with them but I just wanted to go home and I did. Do you think he thinks I'm a freak? I'm in my mid-twenties and my friend and his buddy are in their late-twenties.",2.582146504320498,3.2734418768656752,3.384186959937157,95.92263550667715,74.26119402985073,6.388373919874313,20.8216810683425,6.05967700443912,-0.1640253731343284,965,18,236,5,19,306,127,268,0.065,0.8759999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.1538,1,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,4,3,3,0,10,16,0,1,15,0,17,0,0,3,6,53,42,23,0,6,7,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,4,1,4,24,0,2,5,1,2,6,3,5,1,3,19,5,40,11,33,22,5,37,0,1,3,0,42,17,0,5,11,149,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596678229869896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195502453812264,0.10494831120184336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942450526492663,0.4068580566824361,0.08835806318496595,0.0,0.0,0.09004786250691764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844913208347147,0.11709150566754822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829401119327836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4905530694918742,0.0,0.05528832402923603,0.10151538416934654,0.06014183909781876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478173763368397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10614943175492607,0.0,0.0,0.1221059186855488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22039743450429394,0.0,0.0,0.11937332946859976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051699935379345065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777298956164364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161747855618565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269839642146898,0.07170862947333614,0.08048341366876413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558627433541362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066222340797404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753815497582157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08146797214808918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255871864247096,0.0,0.08847304521720632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973723940644064,0.0,0.0,0.08505678690837243,0.09249425778523426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712292764566098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111873006829164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337402004633116,0.0,0.0,0.0913973830855248,0.0,0.0,0.1872520315658656,0.16799527283960392,0.0,0.0,0.0951478856406253,0.09809929030432554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814675718583504
mentalhealth,2378160984,2020/01/01,How to let people support you? Recently some people told me that they were worried about me and they asked if I was depressed or sad or wanted to kill myself or something. I said no even though I did feel that way. I can’t bring myself to ask for help or even let people help me when they ask to. I just sit and let my depression take over and honestly I don’t really care. Emotions are really difficult for me to navigate especially with people that are close to me.,2.9843617021276607,4.825223978723408,4.4329255319148935,84.20875000000002,75.17021276595744,8.104255319148937,23.45212765957447,8.841846274778883,1.6799191489361704,370,11,74,8,8,123,58,94,0.19899999999999998,0.669,0.132,-0.8126,0,0,1,0,0,1,6.0,0,1,3,0,7,8,1,0,0,0,10,0,0,1,0,15,21,11,1,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,5,2,18,3,11,13,1,7,0,3,0,0,11,2,0,6,2,58,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4175498242028449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151793706218961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25646130576924864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674706496207172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19666848008540028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527851074557868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19958307179467916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471433858503667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4567215379563739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.412860281935616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907534645961,0.0,0.14700164317421766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161955524728526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11461556869999218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16894795408492672,0.0,0.0,0.11193969173855838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462744452973435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226180482227802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781364227051837,0.1181744999152601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119548823553988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mel0ncollie,2020/01/01,"social life=depression ???? due to depression and anxiety, i isolated myself from my friends early in the year and have barely contacted them. during the year i became a much happier person other than feeling a bit lonely. i let them back into my life a few weeks ago and i feel like i’m slipping back into a depressive episode. why is this? do i have to sacrifice my social life for my mental health?",3.4605194805194803,5.716102584415588,5.2506493506493515,77.01025974025976,75.10389610389609,8.555844155844158,26.584415584415584,9.23628265651192,2.7026415584415577,317,12,54,8,7,108,53,77,0.16899999999999998,0.701,0.129,-0.504,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,0,2,5,0,0,6,0,5,3,0,0,0,7,8,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,12,2,8,7,3,11,1,3,0,0,7,3,0,0,9,40,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612240937653008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391363626039931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797062934960832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19856394177123496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4699544078675949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839262149715156,0.12993385737210394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405186839499689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933280735955736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859828321528863,0.3853979579810036,0.08885652539892233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832904966944316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13370144013847785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158809071589103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3708039406195334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589176055975986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641168303017175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342472583885095
mentalhealth,LexiFjor,2020/01/01,"Has anyone else had this problem with their Psychiatrist? So we went to see our psychiatrist for the first time last week and we were honestly really excited because we'd been looking to get help for a while and we were finally going to have someone who can help us.

And it was really hard actually, being there. We told ourselves we wanted help, we wanted someone trained to talk us through how to live more authentically and be open and out as a system.

And we expected some dissociation and the ""scatter-braining"" that comes with it, but when we got there... she didn't want to hear a word about us or DID or the system. She said that was ""not her job"" and obviously that put us straight into survival mode and made the dissociation so much worse, we probably seemed brain damage how much we trailed off or forgot what we were going to say.

I just... we thought she was going to know what to do, but she was just cold and mean... ended up recommending a PTSD therapist :( we've been to several of those and they ALWAYS say they aren't trained to deal with us...

I just hate it :(

Why can't the doctors who are supposed to help us actually help us for once???",4.641294642857143,5.8939655401785735,5.515535714285715,80.4544642857143,69.9375,8.814285714285715,28.732142857142854,9.188382445141503,2.289192857142857,907,33,181,18,16,297,128,224,0.11199999999999999,0.8109999999999999,0.077,-0.9095,1,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,21,0,3,2,11,5,1,0,9,0,22,2,1,3,1,55,44,23,0,5,9,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,12,30,0,1,4,0,0,6,4,3,0,1,19,8,31,2,26,22,4,22,0,1,2,0,43,6,0,5,8,132,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.16437933284378548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700804259865773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588908000688078,0.08629659263093495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05134166385033885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18804182819960175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725508049502811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683039198714823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620598526644062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035765282918251,0.0,0.07459673152893964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922623680047287,0.0,0.07164018698059757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044003131127082616,0.0,0.14359790851930035,0.0,0.06736096449021536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544741889274471,0.08315294546005228,0.0,0.0,0.0949256358689321,0.0,0.2822650838337728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357850224799702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0462868526421806,0.06865312620389966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437060381516282,0.0,0.07072625223616155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969400166940475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174372505249268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382744435678543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969492931135903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080682432649673,0.08059020090685204,0.09845238085246948,0.08466755034135377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791104113517552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011552337564995,0.1339552935082897,0.0,0.0,0.06711496358212472,0.07667361248367824,0.0,0.09514821105814768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272404044855722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769539524472278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977895940597698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668637906576986,0.049111208831391626,0.0,0.0,0.08047885004157887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7091707395705041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14903102677607524,0.0,0.0675587482233413,0.0,0.0,0.07807572413394838,0.07599831255052207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583060753846106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,abbsrett,2020/01/01,"My mental health journey I created a blog dedicated to my mental Illness journey with depression, anxiety, and bipolar. It’s going to launch in about 3 hours and I’d really appreciate any feedback. I’m still in the beginning stages but I’d like to be able to make people feel less alone, and writing is a form of therapy for myself. I’d really love to be a part of a community where we can all help each other and learn from each other. 
Abbsrett.blogspot.com",4.605600649350649,6.500946670454546,6.3424025974026,71.9818181818182,70.93181818181819,10.028571428571428,29.61688311688312,10.290406445055957,3.4783064935064925,369,15,64,11,7,127,63,88,0.08199999999999999,0.7190000000000001,0.19899999999999998,0.9174,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,0,4,4,0,2,1,15,10,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,2,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,2,13,8,6,10,0,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,4,43,8,2,0.23707968458247264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455430537355672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612223153248769,0.0,0.18136530978995885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041963849346188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198746119723779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347378482516944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520046183653136,0.0,0.0,0.1589095151503617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23347573324800155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582515852956755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139736715445604,0.0,0.1582525304127219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4778411206444316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25673419515621165,0.0,0.1643612021733084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037586334316161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18933214235587592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27112128101944577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,danyixa,2020/01/01,"Applying for internships is making me feel worthless at this point Im a junior in college studying cyber security. I do very well in my classes and I get good grades, A’s and B’s. I work very hard at what I do and I take lots of pride in my work, however it can get the best of me when I put too much pressure on myself. I have a job at my schools IT help desk which I love and it’s at least something that makes me feel like I’m good enough in someway. I went to vocational high school for IT and I worked at my dad’s IT company for co-op. 

Finding an internship has put so much pressure on me. So far I applied to 9 places that I want to work for over the summer but my search isn’t over yet. All this stress from applying is making me feel worthless because I feel like either I’m not good enough for the job im applying for,
Or that there’s nothing special about my resume. 

Im also a club officer for my schools cyber security club. And I also held a leadership position in my old dorm’s hall council in sophomore year. So I have experience being in leadership and collaboration which are all important. Though it sounds like I have things going for me, deep down I’m depressed feeling like I’ll never amount to anything because of the pressure I put on myself has given me unrealistic expectations. 

I feel like I’m going insane and there’s no way to stop this stress. I have diagnosed depression and I take meds for It which help. I see a therapist in school once every 2-3 weeks. My schools counseling center is too small to meet up the demands from students, so I can’t see my therapist every week. I’m feeling so lost right now and I could use some help. Thank you.",1.910144467935165,3.9914706627907,3.77429175475687,86.5695102184637,79.2906976744186,6.960394644115574,25.249823819591263,8.00094639256281,1.5267124031007755,1324,51,275,24,33,446,166,344,0.132,0.716,0.152,0.1346,3,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,7,17,26,0,5,12,0,17,2,0,4,3,36,48,21,0,3,4,1,8,5,0,0,1,1,1,0,18,10,0,4,8,2,0,6,5,10,1,0,4,11,43,16,41,42,12,46,0,5,2,1,7,29,0,3,15,173,61,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527039584583946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445348794826955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549044027709444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219558038255048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625348649021314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491966628316268,0.07949660641807918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16185802710271052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198169194905826,0.0,0.0,0.07661531824577217,0.0,0.0,0.2772186651056719,0.2238170220180261,0.0,0.0,0.0715861723554268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184149187576648,0.0,0.08902599097261515,0.19708186587025134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016238574620152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157495580248672,0.08275297663422174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25380815021933306,0.0,0.15544778604421278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913242947592739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549924774888806,0.06658775725357811,0.07068993010679091,0.0,0.15684444118773408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699964515425318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515342796919133,0.0,0.060407837689603686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515341858178487,0.0,0.08218723713787379,0.08341186911600268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183128694756282,0.0,0.07404093319062442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362099624248613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688775910860087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3963373319380109,0.12482722492827728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060297182974540064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548187287734973,0.17943838942881868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777890475840608,0.0,0.0,0.07210966736988066,0.0,0.1818790177604291,0.052034589389020336,0.0,0.07695234681144912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764627357220014,0.0,0.12925002206669184,0.04619717299929616,0.06216947248210699,0.1256526206712262,0.0,0.07042214650543455,0.07260658024481316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22808148390839095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05043770427581737
mentalhealth,1000-Sparks-of-light,2020/01/01,"I feel I created my depression to keep my anger issues in check. As the title says, I somehow whether accidentally or intentionally created my depression to keep me from getting angry. So a bit of backstory is that I used to be a real ass as a kid. Getting into fights with my parents and school staff. It wasn’t until 8th grade that I realized how shitty I was being and felt ashamed for the things I did. During high school despite being angry at points I bit my tongue hard on certain things until to the point I gathered a defeatist attitude. Now I’m 22 with the new year and I’m afraid of getting help for my depression in fear that my anger will come back. I’m going to be completely honest, being unable to get out of bed or do things in general feels like I’m rotting but I feel I’d rather take that then flying off the handle. Its a mixture of fear and self hatred I guess.",3.449614767255216,4.99511611235955,5.0135152487961525,81.76370786516856,73.26966292134831,7.782343499197433,26.759229534510432,8.418075326091056,1.8785252006420528,700,25,136,12,14,236,107,178,0.22399999999999998,0.7190000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.9818,1,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,13,3,4,10,0,11,1,1,3,1,29,30,15,0,1,5,1,5,1,0,1,0,1,1,2,9,9,0,2,5,0,1,2,1,10,0,0,4,6,19,3,27,20,2,20,0,3,0,1,7,11,1,4,8,91,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465183622001424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971700186465017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172373563417597,0.14269735679369022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516659643821853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062987361149144,0.2064474404760119,0.09722925137778876,0.13067651567049113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844247292712623,0.0,0.0773482765286369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14992854445439546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12191809504879182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912243833515964,0.14379621165330314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420521404010285,0.0,0.2419423344558888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664911641915399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13144539556334078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112198649677475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573153530693473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15491061493196276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823149715333052,0.0,0.2754791872750363,0.0,0.0,0.14198108304825569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232961402581256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712546593513842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175459574722139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764338268350384
mentalhealth,KansanLesbian,2020/01/01,"Always lonely/empty? I feel so unbelievable lonely and empty lately. I actually have no friends. I've moved around way too much in the past 3 years and I did make some friends over that time but not to the point of talking all that much after I moved. I've only been in my new city for a few months and I'm hoping to lose weight weight then make friends in sport groups. Friendships take time but right now I feel so alone.

But even with friends in the past I felt this way. This is part of my mental illness. It sucks. No one can feel this hole in me.",1.1684210526315797,3.3662861052631605,1.8816666666666684,98.4925,82.6842105263158,4.5017543859649125,17.394736842105264,5.46131890053228,-0.7629157894736842,432,9,99,2,12,133,73,114,0.166,0.6709999999999999,0.163,0.1827,0,5,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,6,8,1,0,4,0,5,3,0,2,1,18,15,9,0,1,4,0,6,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,2,0,4,1,0,2,3,3,0,1,3,6,9,5,14,12,6,24,0,2,0,0,6,9,1,2,11,60,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.13773993935222528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14618660312262546,0.0,0.0,0.11744631710292534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256515102814598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322682276300966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21410577971906627,0.0,0.13552406953600496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4362019105957172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401916616904657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592209211196398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15790833829385456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18843456986170684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224383299913254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266286607488304,0.3000356506127538,0.2075198187116805,0.0,0.0,0.13632147166697506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564543510512387,0.10734929917963312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15284936521041306,0.2694831852850688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343033988595496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053949143364685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612561603491254,0.11344929407024967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16460889112815486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22407318455755135,0.0,0.3437601081376618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089458674518414
mentalhealth,SpecificSeries2012,2020/01/01,"Does your bad energy come in waves ? I feel like the show stranger things was hinting at something . Sometimes I just notice a toxic vibe floating around . Could be a room , a store , or park . I even notice people around me start to act more negative ( strangers). It’s not everyone but seems like it’ll get to whoever it can . I catch myself trying to get more mad then usual some days and stop it . Idk just curious on others thoughts ...",2.0843902439024404,4.82745012195122,2.573853658536585,91.21443902439024,84.3658536585366,5.719024390243902,21.614634146341466,7.1686216300943375,0.8237229268292685,338,11,65,5,10,104,66,82,0.157,0.735,0.107,-0.6582,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,5,4,1,0,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,15,12,4,0,1,5,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,1,3,1,1,3,2,2,0,0,2,1,7,2,8,7,3,14,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,3,7,41,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3745087358027019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17563184209505686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18119622638350127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16794580804901918,0.0,0.0,0.1356570956792895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18407700297129692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893290839747666,0.0,0.0,0.20099658358320224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635829832185034,0.15027269458713324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197963569046483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20553087198984135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4789653161737599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582885805140114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149297178376215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619362116410927,0.2080396078404909,0.0,0.14888543803103316,0.0,0.0,0.17586039515973795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397459029473347,0.0,0.0,0.1669928618596871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14281252369909408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23166866801758104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RagingPython,2020/01/01,"I need help more than I have ever needed it before. My suicidal friend from the other day is begging me to stay with him or he’s going to kill himself. What do I do!? I can’t let him die... but I can’t stay with him... I don’t know what to do.

I don’t know what to do.

I don’t know what to do.

I don’t know what to do.

I don’t know what to do. He’s going to die unless I’m there for him. But I can’t be. Just thinking about him makes me go into the worst panic attacks I’ve ever had. But if I leave he’ll die. But I can’t stay either. But if I leave he’ll die.

SOMEONE HELP ME PLEASE I CAN’T JUST KEEP RUNNING AWAY.

I’m on the verge of touching my CRT’s electron gun and instantly electrocuting myself. I just want the pain and the confusion to end. I can’t live with myself right now.

Someone... please... tell me what to do. They’re begging me to stay with them or they’ll really kill themselves... but I can’t... I don’t know what to do...",-1.9563370201691583,-0.1006964905660368,1.0091476903057917,100.84801886792455,96.45283018867924,3.867534157449578,14.385816525699415,5.501188778358388,-1.101342420299284,712,15,183,5,29,247,88,212,0.25,0.6859999999999999,0.064,-0.9929,0,0,0,1,0,0,41.0,0,0,2,0,8,8,3,2,5,0,28,1,0,1,2,37,47,13,7,5,15,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,7,0,0,4,13,7,0,0,1,1,36,1,25,41,3,18,0,0,0,0,16,5,0,5,5,125,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215087986990376,0.10034903678724494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088520222697152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888191549237603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4433967352143324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459962468563436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932267558210096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251910647408127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18210326341574185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318145283443134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493529492008848,0.2363330525900517,0.0,0.3521912125169317,0.0,0.0,0.22618715888799226,0.0,0.10921776875052072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431286149352304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129474656624102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583926179385665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11365056852244874,0.12531543175119486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344848297135055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842353399132071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121290747544353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809950702037512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.455369766416126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682992350356786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335434611786436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684378478132683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629977520934772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elsewhat999,2020/01/01,"Got sent to a crisis center for a few days. I contacted a crisis text thing and told them I wanted to kill myself. They sent the cops after me. Police picked me up at work. They ""interviewed"" me in the break room and patted me down in front of my job before buckling me into the price car. 

Pretty sure that I lost my job, even though I have a medical excuse for the days I missed. Let me tell you, that is *great* for my mental health. Just really top notch. 

I don't know what I'm going to do now. I won't find out for sure about the job until Thursday. I guess I should start applying for new jobs but the prospect is just so exhausting.",0.8754220779220816,3.0215037500000013,2.4795670995671024,94.07863636363639,83.46969696969697,5.58961038961039,15.48917748917749,6.868970318607317,-0.3331640692640692,493,8,109,6,14,161,88,132,0.11900000000000001,0.797,0.084,-0.7694,4,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,1,3,3,7,7,1,0,10,0,8,3,0,1,2,15,20,6,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,1,5,2,4,0,0,5,0,23,3,19,12,1,24,0,2,0,0,11,10,0,1,8,74,27,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134334191749024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036238291176269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427044253263372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14428865446661288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972012350526014,0.0,0.12626160330218042,0.17405022332472134,0.17390959603905345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16780649073002804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.626639227943944,0.0,0.1746577485957478,0.0,0.08676022189768981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143090767507776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233176477634965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15903558053746106,0.15909399220931664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247006983761865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16060869143540055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113439713080363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173990877486588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975777785266994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798374570024682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10488060251897613,0.0,0.15510468312712378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084980915974727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311474147736667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149299136238681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,teumessianfox17,2020/01/01,"Sometimes I just really really struggle. And I don't really know how far I would go. So I don't normally post anything because I don't feel comfortable letting people know how I feel but in the last few hours I have been thinking my gf is gonna dump me and it scares me greatly. I have a tendency to react poorly stuff like this and recently anyway my head has just been hell. I'm 19 and in my first year of uni I should be out there having fun and enjoying life and working for my course. (I havent been able to work for almost a year now and my first assignments were done at the last minute with a a long extension and even then I almost just didn't do them). The problem is recently I have been extremely bad mentally because I tried to come off my meds and with in 5 days of intermittent dosage I was struggling with my head. It's been a week now since I started taking them again daily and it still not working so this whole gf situation has made me even worse. Another friend doesnt think she will break up with me but I have extreme paranoia and every little detail is important and I just have a feeling. When I get to my extreme worst my head is just a place of constant pain, but it isnt a pain you can feel you just know it's there. My whole body just feels like crap and the constant thoughts make me feel like there is no way out but one. I dont like thinking about it but I have a history of instant rash decisions and in a split second I wouldnt stop myself from actually doing it. I have done close a few times. 

This whole post is weird because I dont really care about myself because I dont really matter but I read a few posts on here just now and I wanted to be there for every one of you that feels like this or shit in any other way. If you want to talk to anyone I am here I know it sounds like I wouldnt be useful to you because of what I have said already but I want to help everyone (which is a problem too) but know I'm here.",2.797637018477918,3.922509490291265,4.171381146257442,88.82736141559661,74.24271844660194,7.54913874099593,24.21265267773255,8.049812674583475,1.1375060131537746,1538,45,341,23,31,509,187,412,0.18,0.7170000000000001,0.10300000000000001,-0.9896,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,5,2,5,31,26,4,3,17,0,50,10,7,6,0,79,82,31,0,11,19,0,7,6,3,6,3,2,0,0,17,23,0,1,17,1,1,2,14,14,0,5,13,9,56,12,36,59,7,47,1,0,0,0,14,15,3,4,30,245,73,5,0.07234923046411522,0.0,0.0706024124310125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448946069702469,0.0,0.07983917489473526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04919995767642471,0.07586447638723752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050588264143906436,0.0,0.05953725211801768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060408585408160825,0.22051709684822884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036368507913948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376486228161204,0.0,0.0,0.06232245580616299,0.0,0.15636763119341165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04665926834685319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14807676376216852,0.2543782778249728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557196875940943,0.0,0.1219146941254805,0.06913279016661948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560736134166005,0.1550589140988711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308043694630978,0.0,0.0,0.055896835986549535,0.0,0.037799486813133935,0.0,0.041117734961427004,0.0,0.0,0.07976528200190783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22275354962902927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04849416412377116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07124941836449011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988062248362072,0.11794855830282255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398198995989215,0.051102401097743916,0.21207707702386291,0.07251293574986413,0.0,0.06402679226323192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845859119635468,0.04829367313577858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036368507913948,0.0,0.0729110075872164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07088688465871104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805142195057168,0.0,0.1539693644276862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05015784678614702,0.0,0.075589547086252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078716908304004,0.0,0.0,0.13845688515431487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236880919337703,0.0,0.2317438482161857,0.0,0.14287227361423158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882068597844299,0.0,0.07243420111988104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426544538503575,0.059848031076234535,0.08132356635559261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155523889404271,0.0,0.051209157701946326,0.0,0.057778188905953334,0.0604871962520909,0.0,0.15127024876632705,0.08282255947967791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05439761733618855,0.05815157090691419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907539664255508,0.0,0.05743720750104249,0.04218741810072485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04912037835691827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06248650573798165,0.0,0.0,0.12802035189498004,0.11485490312586695,0.05803418864000583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24232599621963344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801330435915584,0.0,0.07373004681061276,0.051394817520876726,0.0,0.0,0.09318106471238627
mentalhealth,bluberrycupcake,2020/01/01,"I’m not feeling the best mentally but I’m too scared to get help because what if I’m faking it I can’t quite explain what feels wrong but I just know somethings wrong. It’s just a feeling in the back of my head and throughout my body. But I know I’m not ok. I can tell I’m about to have a break down and I know it’s going to be bad but I’m scared to tell anyone or ask to go anywhere to get help. The last few have been so scary I almost went to the hospital and it feels like it’s going to be one of those. I’m scared if I say anything people will tell me I’m faking it to get out of work since I made jokes about pretending to be sick tomorrow since I’m not in the mood but my boss will be mad and think I’m hungover. I know my boss will think I’m faking it if I call in tomorrow unless I get a doctors note and I was thinking of just going to the crisis center since I can’t afford the hospital and I don’t think I’d have proof. I think it’s because this last year had started off being the absolute best year of my life and ended up being the worst thing I’ve ever gone through. I’m reflecting, especially since the anniversary of the event that kicked everything off happens to be the third. I’m not ok and I don’t feel safe but I’m scared I’m faking it without realizing it to get out of work tomorrow",1.336005154639178,2.611263051546396,3.4122895189003444,92.19410438144331,78.2783505154639,6.636941580756012,22.090635738831615,7.333567415737692,0.5561831615120276,1032,29,245,13,24,352,122,291,0.259,0.6829999999999999,0.057,-0.9969,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,5,9,21,1,4,15,2,21,5,2,3,2,53,66,20,0,3,19,0,5,1,0,3,3,1,0,0,16,10,0,1,17,2,0,6,9,13,0,2,6,6,22,7,34,50,4,29,0,0,0,0,9,10,0,5,13,143,38,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665313354343977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749063132537188,0.0,0.07942962267676179,0.0,0.090235314142063,0.0,0.0,0.07421968513662171,0.08059208268288671,0.11767818750996092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20258838251619285,0.0,0.0,0.10721450781935576,0.0,0.0,0.09856005270707376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879465659933198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854901020161897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730993977137849,0.0,0.0,0.08674801290396185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440228568497985,0.06895554520570209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521445706791236,0.0,0.21942337324102795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535434468310846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905971901351633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939371641609287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21218451121297305,0.15735710245226492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681765498519196,0.04715591669398456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133172718368628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727176877688824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06540600356408571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691640448244351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10266333947227216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675840129261963,0.3865426138539355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193769518895089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430757658892481,0.0,0.0,0.06831897558519395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530942146903526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412512236152901,0.30923793888017675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947713236751792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304404577666353,0.0,0.14053875735119006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110639495333541,0.0,0.12431438380885415
mentalhealth,teslabus,2020/01/01,"Starting a group to educate asian community about mental health, and we're looking for some input. Hey guys I'm new to reddit so I hope i'm doing this right.

Me and a few friends decided we want to start a non profit/group to destigmatize mental health in Asian-american communties (mostly Chinese community for now), since we've all had personal experiences with some of the culture specific issues Asians have with mental illnesses and suicide.  We're in the middle of creating a website as a hub for our information, and a blog style section where we can post perspectives of asians-mostly teens- and their experiences with mental health to share and kind of convince parents that the issue actually exists. In addition, we want to host workshops centered around themes asian parents like so that we can attract them, since hosting a mental health specific workshop catered to asians probably won't have many attendees. For example, one of the  workshops will be educating parents on how to encourage their children to college (something they take super seriously) without destroying their mental health. 

These are our most concrete ideas so far, and we are considering doing things in the future like culturally educating mental health professionals so they can better understand our cultural issues, and working with existing organizations to create resources that asians can refer to that are culture specific and put them on our website. If you have any other ideas that you'd like to let me know about, please PM me!",14.087442748091604,11.055308202290076,12.463114503816795,52.37329770992369,52.854961832061065,15.5181679389313,49.86412213740458,13.506818969022046,6.815449160305342,1247,62,176,33,10,396,147,262,0.027999999999999997,0.815,0.158,0.9831,3,0,1,0,0,1,25.0,9,2,7,3,10,14,1,0,12,0,18,7,0,1,1,38,29,16,1,4,2,3,0,3,1,2,7,0,0,3,9,20,0,0,7,1,0,1,2,2,0,1,1,1,22,12,36,23,7,20,0,0,1,0,34,13,0,6,8,121,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.07947139984327067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05538039528883942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07249677516521574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202498433961561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15932329865536998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06291852713958451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063607808875782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5193864888329414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088596273013778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838663906841756,0.0,0.25499924840089194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480478154208912,0.04475600320520893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327551570632795,0.0,0.1193589680963386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06838711623458822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256499595850031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5744899850016957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865299079568851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055184259933392335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712806217825091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07110821564731436,0.0,0.08939408551875203,0.0,0.0,0.07799475820188383,0.0,0.08780356167288689,0.0,0.0,0.08186733247448337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954730897718438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473213290379674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626946824152901,0.0,0.0,0.1152839770551766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907957231679002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123097850331453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054103556674150566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847794667329856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606807306066126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850298944443129,0.0,0.05928757983802704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,b8_comment_dont_h8,2020/01/01,"How can I achieve being more honest with my artistic ideas? Or is this something impossible for someone like me? Often when I come up with artistic ideas I end up feeling like I'm being pretentious or dishonest. I'll think about a poem I'd like to write or a piece of art I'd like to make, but instantly just think that I don't have the ability or skill to make that piece of art and therefore it would be pretentious to do it. It's really hard to explain but this also makes me feel like there's no point in actually doing research and doing a proper piece of art because it would all be in hopes of getting rid of this feeling that I'm not really an artist. It makes me feel like if I train to be a good artist, it won't matter because I won't really be training to be better but to feel more entitled to make art. It's really hard to explain.

I've been to the psychologist this year and he told me I have OCD. I don't know if this is an experience common to all artists or just related to my condition. I feel like I'll never be able to be honest with the art I create because I do it to consciously make art, not for the sake of art itself. Please ask me to explain further if I'm not clear enough.",6.769475065616796,4.792940448818901,7.7634251968503944,77.10280183727038,65.77165354330708,11.143832020997376,33.765091863517064,9.928628108626363,2.966861942257218,950,32,204,17,12,325,111,254,0.059000000000000004,0.7609999999999999,0.18,0.9846,0,0,1,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,3,8,12,0,0,10,0,25,0,0,8,4,56,51,17,0,6,16,0,8,7,0,4,0,0,0,0,17,7,0,0,15,12,0,1,9,0,0,0,2,8,18,12,32,36,8,12,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,10,12,136,35,2,0.11017643881998836,0.0,0.10751631114593864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810805831869371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300009757070293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20148760345179534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744210674294786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490724635481604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758362269492253,0.11384171331959568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077736983670268,0.0,0.0,0.3342511073938124,0.3148402796291723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575626419186287,0.0,0.0,0.09241076959647204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19739289664934265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943006356227762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487515774110837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06055008941266725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3767864994639129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44126177067846384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497486177997987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094064446072092,0.10415234685708398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28232739174814936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335213907611836,0.0848192053374144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119322653246572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052783088000574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15653236204252108,0.0,0.0,0.07095001432363301
mentalhealth,ParanoidDiscord,2020/01/01,"I think I'm a pedo I realized this earlier this year. I think about underaged kids in a sexual manner sometimes, but it might also be my woman preference as I like smaller bodies and medium sized breasts for the most part, but I'm not sure. This really makes me angry at myself as not only am I a Christian, but I'm wanting children too. Please, does anyone have any advice to get rid of these thoughts? And please, don't say stuff like ""I hope you burn in hell, pedo."" Because that's not helping anyone especially not me. Don't forget, pedophilia IS a mental illness.",3.1297297297297284,5.264965801801804,4.791252252252253,80.48201351351352,75.66666666666667,7.322882882882882,25.51441441441441,8.238735603445708,1.8883073873873872,448,16,80,8,10,151,80,111,0.174,0.6940000000000001,0.133,-0.7236,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,0,3,5,1,0,5,0,7,3,2,1,1,21,17,8,0,3,7,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,3,7,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,1,11,4,9,14,2,4,2,0,0,1,6,3,1,3,3,52,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19366595251477145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584899985169794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13477389338206927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771537879343257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081289945412955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22014097645933592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17343469852156052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354447943135807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284050665761968,0.0,0.0,0.19684431756474868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936482246290694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229129986322594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19972578894406934,0.2102449898951547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15073007398061264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146171079095998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4350994205749142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696360796425918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15760618367511875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19601191938128934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22687659356042256,0.0,0.0,0.18678881509954373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25398033608680937,0.0,0.15733826705340004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168957730309633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762587077175966
mentalhealth,woopdeedoomyhuluhoop,2020/01/01,"I feel like I'm crashing down I'm not alone I'm surrounded by people, by friends but I feel so alone. It's just this perpetual sadness. I know I have depression but this is different. There's lots of fear. I'm so scared and I dont know what of. It feels like my world is ending and there is no ""light at the end of the tunnel"". I feel like something terrible is going to happen. Just this super strong sense of doom. I dont know what to do anymore. Any advice would be appreciated and amazing.",-0.34559870550161875,1.9255385825242757,1.9812038834951444,93.08863430420713,95.2135922330097,5.0767637540453086,18.51715210355987,6.742157984588678,0.21281540453074446,386,12,85,6,15,130,60,103,0.21,0.5329999999999999,0.257,0.6517,1,2,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,6,13,0,2,2,0,10,0,0,0,0,17,23,7,0,1,5,0,4,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,7,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,0,5,8,7,10,21,1,7,1,3,0,0,1,4,0,1,5,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069524623503045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3406340219482701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182927975651004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16308677001610528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14163755563308175,0.0,0.0,0.1718116235662307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854602176957985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913016311653359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850480655116956,0.3325964272612985,0.35244190244115264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705098142876795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345875287528492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541952370421324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711265373124131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24102080465618744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980655944837295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400651840235099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463966481938494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265989732015861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168180969661876,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NapDragon334956,2020/01/01,"Very strange thing happened (m18) For some reason I got very anxious thinking about raising my voice  and I have no idea why. I was sitting around and thought of how I never raise my voice(like calling out to someone or going “woo!” all enthusiastically). My voice has always been low for as long as I remember and I rarely yell. I found that odd and funny and decided to yell just to experience raising my voice however when I tried to I felt very anxious and yelling or speaking in a loud voice was was actually very difficult. At first my brain just didnt let me raise my voice but after some trying I felt less anxious and raised my voice. I’m partly worried and partly curious as to why the hell that happened. Any ideas? 

TLDR: i feel anxious when I try to raise my voice idk why",2.2524303405572748,4.873695078947371,3.345743034055728,87.00049535603718,81.76315789473685,5.681733746130033,26.046439628482965,7.048011613610866,1.2968726006191962,620,26,119,8,17,199,90,152,0.179,0.779,0.042,-0.9556,1,0,0,0,1,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,7,3,1,0,2,0,8,1,1,2,2,31,19,17,0,0,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,12,0,0,3,10,0,0,11,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,10,15,21,0,18,8,6,13,1,1,0,0,2,5,1,4,6,77,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.11144234863974888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950232262232171,0.0,0.0,0.07765965280286359,0.0,0.0,0.5160522275275256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101661867151615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274845360091023,0.11661057299191302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170913454527523,0.0,0.0,0.05774275556639648,0.0,0.2192990744345792,0.0,0.0,0.09713813234289917,0.0,0.12521398103267678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490227170814572,0.0,0.09133586272140816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20197268096899398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578349249436711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11677684138950413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010630637112571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807778160510954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24733410406961906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741622191829415,0.0,0.0,0.12936589946378724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967609613676751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586914836560096,0.0731745007296805,0.0,0.09066173637450847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23260212257691365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3769065621762817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091421639240975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597525022025648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kaka_o8,2020/01/01,"Consider reading 'The Daily Stoic' this Year Today marks the day of a new year and a new decade. This time of the year can sometimes leave us feeling worthless and alone, but it gives us an opportunity to start again and work towards getting, or being, better.

Stoicism is a school of philosophy that can help us do just that. The book, 'The Daily Stoic' provides daily passages from popular philosophers aimed to help us approach and navigate challenges throughout our lives.


The passage for January 1st reads,

“The chief task in life is simply this: to identify and separate matters so that I can say clearly to myself which are externals not under my control, and which have to do with the choices I actually control. Where then do I look for good and evil? Not to uncontrollable externals, but within myself to the choices that are my own …”

 —EPICTETUS, DISCOURSES, 2.5.4–5


I hope everyone has a great 2020.

(I hope this post doesn't break rule 1. My intention is to help people, rather than promote a product. Hopefully the mods can see this distinction.)",8.210241779497096,8.802251648936174,7.645667311411994,70.6877272727273,61.76595744680851,10.45338491295938,38.89941972920696,10.230975488527342,4.230153191489362,842,41,134,17,11,264,119,188,0.048,0.7020000000000001,0.251,0.993,0,1,0,0,0,0,25.0,5,0,0,7,5,12,1,1,16,0,16,1,0,3,2,25,25,12,0,4,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,12,8,0,2,1,3,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,4,15,9,20,24,1,19,0,1,2,0,10,5,0,4,11,98,27,7,0.0,0.0,0.11654048535313866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368712923904875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10562072203389998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678880852922008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701852659323681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411464059683522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060384304902699124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06239405124586363,0.11456227319816012,0.0,0.10016708930807412,0.0,0.1316652556017908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24014193973759684,0.0,0.0,0.3558445946623528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645265152209406,0.0,0.0,0.08435262226288823,0.0,0.0,0.10545347903147584,0.0,0.10028598632461708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306806659976469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279348548376665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437507070183943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389124070247833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949706672426638,0.0,0.12086334807839187,0.09516537505055024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811327663087802,0.0,0.08452884097893505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696370281406226,0.0,0.1131998797873644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5746089209494676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694201113058271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23071520079957664
mentalhealth,LFleet5407,2020/01/01,"Is anyone else similar to me?.. I have always been an anxious person but this
is taking a toll on my life. I go to see my friends
even ones I've known my whole life and I cant
figure out what to say to them.. I dont know if its
stress or anxiety but I feel like I shouldnt be like
this, maybe it's a chemical imbalance, Another thing is I've always had problems
figuring out my personality, I'm 18 now and it's been like this since 8th grade. 

and I always smile,
not a bad thing but i think it's so i try to have
things be 'amazing' around my friends and cant
have things just be neutral, like I dont know how to act or what to say. Can someone help
me out with this. I can go into more detail if
needed.",-0.9303137651821842,1.0620214679487177,1.7569770580296868,97.08977732793524,90.73076923076924,5.079082321187585,17.18488529014845,6.5966054737557815,-0.278802564102564,543,14,134,7,19,187,86,156,0.067,0.7340000000000001,0.198,0.9722,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,0,6,10,0,1,4,0,19,2,0,1,0,30,29,13,0,5,9,0,1,4,2,1,2,2,0,2,14,10,0,0,7,0,0,3,6,3,0,1,3,4,19,7,14,22,2,10,0,0,1,0,8,6,0,4,5,90,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34492737877830554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14489247201099795,0.10570636890051106,0.15610266144794754,0.0,0.09661779788925058,0.14158046308769492,0.0,0.12300838700895488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537348818963675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238889420992228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11543061858676547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912657640832163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986733002928076,0.09871492974941284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21351312575715484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570603409069712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261830638802504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518788594580649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19519948132128068,0.2700286388762201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13881913127698384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102457795527465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09363350007251717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24130471706989445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132218406507887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197705831684617,0.0,0.0,0.11011057718940263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430289353562899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707841019211924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582832963025216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389322674709203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36719929805253054,0.08853936640293744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381430394274383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15427164463453286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,E0431,2020/01/01,"I just want to die It’s already 2020, and god I just can’t see myself going through this year. I was so close to doing it last year, and honestly, all I want to do right now is to kill myself. It’s getting so much harder to live like this, and I don’t think I can last another day feeling so damn depressed.",6.467711442786069,3.761027313432837,7.209552238805973,83.15174129353234,66.91044776119404,10.127363184079602,32.78109452736318,7.793537801064563,2.0586855721393023,238,7,56,2,3,80,43,67,0.21100000000000002,0.632,0.157,-0.8389,0,0,0,0,0,2,7.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,2,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,11,14,6,2,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,2,8,2,6,13,2,9,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,7,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787745400678293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648960806549298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16292022168872836,0.0,0.2175828657248583,0.0,0.2621816404233594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277332192191196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198451217744556,0.0,0.14357084310572682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794886948563935,0.0,0.0,0.4118411185471951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341829618564774,0.0,0.22306975920731748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857061579369211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157377157784979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20130694114950914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618699082035722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29800587465070866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3253604322999969
mentalhealth,tonighttheyfall,2020/01/01,any psychiatrist impatient program (US) that don't make you feel like a prisoner? hi everyone. back in August i got put in a psych hospital and i felt so isolated since i had barely any contact with the outside. are there any US based programs that helped someone where you aren't completely isolated from loved ones?,5.158965517241381,7.601014206896554,5.616758620689655,75.45410344827587,70.72413793103449,10.157241379310344,34.01379310344828,10.355215969177356,4.216244137931034,256,13,43,8,5,82,46,58,0.18899999999999997,0.706,0.105,-0.6574,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,2,2,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,1,0,5,9,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,2,7,2,4,6,0,6,0,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,3,26,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4596301031332277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323988043650548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362201555410117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21528142824261728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391719182482593,0.16095258804830906,0.21632094350472095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18019100217959932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101217365646286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006898446014536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033398013619485,0.0,0.1503878391526653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15266742531195296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22648622779616376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186368430618057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190893851343851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.542010335115498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Elcucey,2020/01/01,"2020 rap  2019 was just like every other year..miserable, lonely and unsuccessful. Will 2020 just be a repeat of every other year that I've had?

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpfFPtwKbgM&feature=youtu.be](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TpfFPtwKbgM&feature=youtu.be)",23.114285714285717,31.21114328571429,11.161428571428573,27.508571428571447,44.714285714285715,7.085714285714286,17.714285714285715,8.07648339933343,1.539328571428571,244,3,19,3,4,57,23,28,0.184,0.732,0.083,-0.466,0,2,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,12,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7055651536460876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5486564854163697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590695096982166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4193456403198901
mentalhealth,kchristine989,2020/01/01,"I feel alone. Especially tonight. I’m feeling really alone today. About a year ago, I was in a bad accident, and I now have a spinal cord injury. It’s been an awful year - mentally, and physically. I don’t have many close friends that I can talk to, about the hard things that are going on in my life. I think because it’s New Years, I’m feeling especially alone. No one asked me to be a part of their plans. I’m just at home alone with my cat. I know it’s just another day, but I’m feeling sad. Does anyone else feel like this ever?",-0.14598214285714306,2.077739223214288,2.1746428571428567,93.72035714285715,89.80357142857143,5.7,18.714285714285715,7.1686216300943375,0.287957142857143,411,12,95,7,14,139,76,112,0.196,0.71,0.094,-0.7952,0,4,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,1,6,4,0,0,6,1,8,2,1,0,1,15,21,3,0,0,3,0,6,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,7,4,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,2,6,11,2,10,18,1,16,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,11,52,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923920957895588,0.0,0.0,0.6040020551254253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287964359578618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019438367039328,0.14938506077341426,0.0,0.0,0.1362994233300108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12173343107498015,0.08887578687251327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402625121798207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275869163950765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217937107750246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188067836813308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685937704567168,0.10415657258251344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264149929852273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285913204333993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060442959424187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14624510846436548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012557720017717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102979908894834,0.07122847981522169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781409160626705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692790862019936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408105245039238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879503000422203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578826799783158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340054425464027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718516831785193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686027340784252,0.09342008312792377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819740269696032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816632100060599
mentalhealth,SpiderTingle,2020/01/01,"How do you know if what you’re going through is disassociation? I feel like i’m watching my life from inside of my head. I don’t feel connected or aware of my surroundings. For example my brother in law was standing next to me and I didn’t notice. This has been going on for the past hour, at first I felt euphoric kinda. When I talk it feels weird, feels like my body is moving faster than my mind, my mind is in slow motion, feel like I can’t capture things correctly. Also, it feels like i’m not here, and the noises and my family’s voices talking to me don’t make me feel anything. I’m not making sense right now but I can’t put my thoughts together. Also feel lightheaded, but not dizzy, just high.",2.1961698717948717,4.10838324305556,3.643888888888888,88.66692307692308,77.68055555555556,6.6529914529914524,22.188034188034187,7.61054688173877,0.8362976495726495,553,16,117,8,13,182,90,144,0.01,0.903,0.087,0.8047,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,1,7,5,0,0,2,0,12,3,2,3,1,30,30,11,0,1,8,1,9,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,11,0,0,5,8,1,0,1,5,11,20,4,13,25,0,21,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,3,12,70,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131456095206428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966659665841223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802852876191985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563136298694638,0.0,0.5390665158057645,0.3808211449881176,0.127956298170322,0.0,0.0,0.11335602631085548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514763243215817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367694052174973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080288902459406,0.0,0.0,0.13124020588717036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323953087077703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412974583297384,0.26042822422470674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17791223425751104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26912142286302665,0.0,0.0,0.1416407111407341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14172994636780126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15172427084642878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721751540623366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13396917943234166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380847077562868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21422839129559595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853603596118492,0.0,0.0,0.10579835051366296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,j-hogs,2020/01/01,"i’m not meant to be here. idk how to cope with the fact that i’m still here i wasn’t meant to leave past 15 yet here i am, i’m 16 and so far life is completely shit, my girlfriend of 4 years snaps at me and doesn’t know if she wants to be with me due to my anxiety and bulimia, i cannot leave the house, i don’t know what i want to do in the future (i didn’t plan bc i thought i would’ve killed myself by now but i’m too much of a pussy to actually do it) i doubt i’ll be able to do anything in the future because of my anxiety (agoraphobia)- ive never been on a bus by myself. i’m lonely, my friends treat me like shit by constantly snapping at me and insulting me for stupid shit (i didn’t know one of my friends had a bf as i was nearly hospitalised for my ed so they all got angry and told me i was pretending to not know). i hate the fact i’m still here i don’t know what to do. i’m not looking for replies, just someone to hear me and understand me. i’m so miserable and sick of being here. i just let people take the piss out of me because all i do is forgive them as i’m scared i’m overreacting. im not meant to be here",-0.11767441860465055,1.3426657790697654,2.597848837209302,95.58421511627908,83.06976744186046,6.315503875968993,20.439922480620154,7.333567415737692,0.2770899224806205,873,25,227,13,24,306,123,258,0.217,0.6940000000000001,0.08800000000000001,-0.9890000000000001,0,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,1,17,17,8,3,9,0,26,6,4,1,5,38,54,15,1,3,8,0,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,0,4,10,0,0,11,1,0,0,12,12,0,1,13,2,37,5,35,35,3,19,0,2,1,0,11,8,4,2,12,145,41,0,0.1354741384193252,0.0,0.13220321671785246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20727469016352126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148367277442096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516755470985806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14204205662931765,0.14639941556189232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20933396656928044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835104429200364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13375266439157665,0.0,0.0,0.1526891999590546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563189666299011,0.0,0.0,0.14633531697174235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498820619974869,0.0,0.3722652176023141,0.0,0.0,0.2868951033293811,0.0,0.13853148518745795,0.09568939041182242,0.06618582096863049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376415623860167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958907959235468,0.0,0.10448600726469948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918007822911946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293253943395306,0.0939207097951389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563324621227554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4171867688152697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478679785249835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21637964388150369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185969212678088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755133329683708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945134487632326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141033355846618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15981231370722496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09623694099016927,0.0,0.0,0.08724090344794448
mentalhealth,ratchetpony,2020/01/02,"Helpful analogy from my therapist: Needing medication for depression is like needing insulin for diabetes TL;DR in the the title 

I felt like a failure to be told by my therapist that I should get back on antidepressants after being off them for the last five years. 

I'm using all the tools I was taught through therapy: reaching out to trusted friends, exercising more, using the three Cs (Google them and change your life), etc. But still I found myself in a depressive state almost 24/7. My therapist said I was displaying signs of Anhedonia, which is an inability to feel pleasure and that it was unlikely I'm going to be able to pull myself out of this one without chemical assistance. 

I was devastated. I've worked so hard over the last 22 years to fight depression from literally killing me. I've been through good times and bad, been on all kinds of medications but after last time, I thought I was done. I thought I had myself figured out. I thought I was fine since I found success professionally and personally. 

I thought wrong. 

My therapist made me feel OK about it though with an analogy about depression being like diabetes. A diabetic can go to the gym every single day and eat the healthiest foods possible but they still need insulin to stay alive. They look healthy on the outside but their body needs medication to function like a ""normal"" person. 

Clinical depression is similar. Everything can seem perfect: you can try your hardest to exercise your mental health but the chemicals in your brain may never be balanced on their own. It's OK to get help. It doesn't make you weak. It makes you resilient.

After she told me that, I was speechless for a moment or two. I cried harder than I have in a long time. I was grieiving a medication-free life. It doesn't mean I'll be on them forever. I will likely be able to go years without them like I did before. But this time it hit me that I'm not going to magically grow out of depression.

Depression is something that will always be with me and knowing the steps I need to take control of it is the important piece. As much as that hurts to admit that, I can't let this take my life. I've teetered to close to the edge of that to let it take me. This disease is something I will manage for the rest of my life. I don't think ""fight"" or ""battle"" are the right terms since I can't simply beat it to death and have it go away. I have to humble myself with getting help to manage it. But I will manage it because I deserve to be happy. 

If you made it this far, thanks for reading my rant. Hopefully, it helps someone else going through this. I know I'm not alone even if I feel that way sometimes.",4.86247360641892,6.246533589843754,5.547772381756758,79.93451646959461,69.546875,8.972635135135134,30.83002533783784,9.358847034038227,2.7507763302364867,2106,87,400,44,37,683,242,512,0.11,0.7390000000000001,0.151,0.9640000000000001,0,1,2,0,3,0,58.0,0,8,8,5,8,34,4,0,24,2,48,21,2,7,4,69,99,22,2,10,15,0,5,6,1,6,17,1,0,2,31,15,2,1,17,4,0,9,10,15,0,4,26,7,64,19,70,55,10,52,0,8,1,0,30,19,0,8,27,277,95,8,0.1283782696607262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427614643129285,0.0664805852540629,0.0,0.0,0.0534105022632426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060307805150234664,0.049357482525715216,0.053595246401400135,0.03912910081057986,0.0,0.05462022598746614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129965839192022,0.0,0.07165630309212696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790359347498119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199357282517199,0.0,0.0,0.07050875052158698,0.0413966817309517,0.0,0.3870020544049177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06568777092306492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06568150976653941,0.053621785580887295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158785296735645,0.04239631817330627,0.0,0.05408211454926528,0.0,0.05768905544622342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736786571380428,0.0,0.061631635637694665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761775662851259,0.14076014640095175,0.049592366341905066,0.0,0.10060852092007633,0.0,0.21888098737972805,0.05383880086283397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833052761903369,0.057500856777020326,0.0,0.0,0.06823004870540986,0.0,0.0,0.17209849611160322,0.0,0.0,0.06375429429127545,0.0,0.0,0.06871579642716756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07101576727825963,0.06684310623562836,0.07055333962373664,0.1569681362893417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13127547862197325,0.18135473691570766,0.18815741375806375,0.0,0.0,0.05680536441059578,0.053902706810796126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147462280968045,0.085693491872136,0.0,0.0,0.0699207855199538,0.0,0.1939914009063245,0.0646875504633703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04718639979683038,0.2379771506957004,0.04950661791581741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289172348998594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04349621898892052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120949532870482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236360492650082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420650532185737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054817170421655965,0.061058566387647076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05843537757425795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619583128778644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05438724564015095,0.09883186397961166,0.06348469565915679,0.0,0.0,0.06841707709301663,0.10252305198402732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447867228681161,0.0,0.0,0.05909673126955438,0.07340586981709094,0.2981141316607456,0.0,0.04112980575563044,0.06306549906479322,0.2038360122374826,0.14971680285973282,0.0,0.0,0.12267093819070675,0.0,0.04358020906434579,0.0,0.06270345768318157,0.0,0.0,0.11087760619328138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05095034747004842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237520707637039,0.0,0.04673045464541047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018074235780264,0.0,0.12400709492190375
mentalhealth,Jamobinks,2020/01/02,"Worried one day it’ll go to far [M17] This is my first post here, been lurking for a while.

Been depressed for just over a year now. Just don’t feel anything anymore, except for feeling worthless and wishing I was never born. I have no energy and am worried this problem in my head will push me over the edge. The only time I’m okay is when with other people and I can’t trust myself to be left alone anymore. I’m worried one day when driving I’ll act on my intrusive thoughts and drive off a bridge or something. Bawling my eyes out in bed as I’m typing this, just want to stop living but I can’t do that to everyone around me, it’s unfair. Why was I brought into this world, just so I can suffer?",0.7788698630136999,2.98605913013699,2.355051369863016,94.43065924657536,84.41095890410959,4.4719178082191755,22.138698630136986,5.602791699666715,0.11569999999999993,547,19,117,3,16,178,97,146,0.17,0.758,0.07200000000000001,-0.9347,0,1,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,11,6,0,0,5,1,16,2,2,0,1,23,26,11,0,3,7,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,8,8,0,1,3,0,0,6,5,4,0,3,6,3,13,2,19,17,0,31,0,3,1,0,0,12,0,1,12,81,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759614957336713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369832739815422,0.0,0.0,0.1398103114686456,0.1512438706286519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191383246086522,0.0,0.14633157309837366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234334945005865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718095112221673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14451384312337925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655607417767627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436278434353072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18459300222752015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500216879060661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310346246786421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302524781573587,0.1292139145867197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778481425154005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162713846130615,0.0,0.0,0.1625679683707225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079459623842893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420410490411376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487881259101267,0.09906799280941864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020933469397923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330513054833575,0.0,0.19537254575871588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5176143100228124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940775075237476
mentalhealth,Hexa000,2020/01/02,"Sleep experience I ve been strugling withe depression, anxiety and paranoia since I was 13. I’ve been in therapy but it only helped me to stop my nightmares and to kinda fix my sleep schedule. I used to have lucid dreams and sleep paralysis and horrible nightmares that gave me a state of anxiety during the day. However, I manage to overcome some of my problems after LSD trips and after meeting some people. I stopped taking drugs since may and I’m happy with it. I started doing what I like professionally and I  surrounded myself with healthy relationships. So I was pretty happy with myself and my progress, but it was on Nye party when I understood that while accomplishing all this thing I was actually drinking a lot in the past 3 months and I’ve been drunk half of that time. On Nye I reached the lowest point of my life. Everybody is amazed that I didn’t lost my consciousness because of alcohol poisoning and so am I. So after that night I promised myself that I will not embrace another toxic habit. After 2 days I still feel a little dazed and nauseous. Today I began to dissociate and I thought that it was still because of the alcohol and I went to sleep. I don’t even know how to describe what happened. I felt that my soul left my body and I was walking thorough the house, talking to my parents and feeling every touch, and hearing voices clearly whispering into my ear. Somehow I was conscious that my body is still in bed and I was trying to come back but it was like my body didn’t accept me for more than a couple of seconds.  I was waking up for a couple of seconds and set an alarm every 5 minutes because I thought that was the only think that kept me connected to reality but I couldn’t wake up. When I finally woke up I thought I was dead and that nothing is real. My head was hurting in a different way like energy was circulating. My parents told me that I 've been asleep for almost 3 hours and they heard the alarms. Does somebody knows what this could have been? It felt different than the other lucid dreams I had and now I’m really scared to sleep because I don’t want it to repeat.",4.489578766050733,6.034688975728159,5.431575321014723,79.79240995928596,70.6504854368932,8.228750391481366,30.28061384278109,8.748949900417786,2.4993264015032888,1686,70,310,30,31,553,204,412,0.132,0.723,0.145,0.8164,6,0,4,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,3,13,17,1,3,15,0,35,20,13,2,2,65,63,32,1,4,5,2,5,3,0,2,5,5,1,0,27,27,4,3,14,4,0,4,6,9,0,3,36,10,57,8,43,23,5,48,1,3,0,0,11,14,0,7,30,225,84,3,0.0,0.0,0.08183825905802547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17924823517124305,0.08397675074437817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793774119187223,0.12831003821924078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448552437508996,0.0,0.2044885966606083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27945889603095003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224060917721205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695783750232111,0.18558578400560471,0.0,0.10816948483619793,0.0,0.07223113942113507,0.0,0.0,0.17523811789202318,0.0,0.0,0.07338913781800918,0.0,0.0,0.0821538817276195,0.0972545365934534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05539076689242458,0.0,0.14131650714584407,0.0,0.0,0.08203417465309314,0.0,0.0,0.0848073761266998,0.0,0.16104339762955253,0.09186789413792568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415983595794805,0.17854759517138102,0.0,0.0,0.08606770445437692,0.0,0.0945197750239337,0.0,0.0562116481535456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258823115349401,0.0967667232639519,0.08977715107631745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217790027439296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111747108122968,0.0,0.05923496656167046,0.12291377994134935,0.08405282789386169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154644767043574,0.07129738325663391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693870248104583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869981028111163,0.0,0.08046887759361834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756328770400846,0.0,0.0,0.18624002971839027,0.0,0.08005678974761737,0.05814009348601778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927770821695773,0.0,0.0,0.0853188916447856,0.0,0.08024563216375921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545453377572756,0.053724830164837915,0.0,0.0,0.09003755244665547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396156323556565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13874479646472332,0.0,0.4196181752042811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059358712682093875,0.0,0.2009194684194079,0.14022656354438828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305459185333524,0.06740595909752163,0.0,0.0,0.09590472943790213,0.0,0.05571489738184875,0.053736069099869256,0.0,0.19973373027300967,0.048901230604406425,0.0,0.07949238463615313,0.08013475738648755,0.0,0.05693751970486392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243076643043259,0.0,0.0,0.049464611582587095,0.06656660156820877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774190620288265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cat-and-wine-mom,2020/01/02,"For 2020 I have decided I need to focus on myself. 
My mental health has been declining of a while now. I’m back to having suicidal thoughts and wanting to cut/ wanting to harm. I haven’t because I worked so hard to stop self harming. These past 3 years have just been nuts. From cutting contact with my emotionally abusive parents, graduating my undergrad while working 40+ hours a week, getting married and dealing with all my husbands health problems, I’m done putting everyone else’s needs first. I have given up EVERYTHING I love and enjoy. I haven’t talked with my friends in like 6+ months because I had other priorities, sold most of the things I enjoyed to make sure my husband was happy and comfortable, and moved across the country to be closer to my in-law. Now that everything has calmed down and my husband is healthy, it’s time for my mental health. I need to be happier and healthier for everyone around me and for myself. It’s time to get back on track.",6.67486803519062,6.980401892473117,6.674437927663735,77.32711143695019,65.0215053763441,9.77438905180841,36.801564027370475,9.573946990214177,3.4922537634408606,776,37,142,14,11,247,114,186,0.131,0.701,0.168,0.8257,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,7,14,2,0,4,0,16,4,0,1,2,26,30,11,1,6,1,4,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,6,12,0,1,2,0,1,2,2,5,0,1,8,1,22,9,27,20,2,25,0,0,0,1,10,8,0,1,16,94,28,4,0.0,0.1525089010004311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145856479652817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19795125007706305,0.0,0.15692968975494695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270183953878306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172244311915535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752675120302913,0.14478958874038925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459897093649901,0.2313655408862337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948683265917733,0.0,0.0,0.09944663310720103,0.0,0.1344989078684436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702191307635986,0.11530537921563495,0.0,0.0,0.410461273840842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12676056957678086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288474978653738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617234948615658,0.0,0.08591976824750018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594334399445081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274088613737148,0.1368060732463002,0.0,0.2863266442658315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429252807293051,0.0,0.12287518603027064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316503086525572,0.0,0.12939639476927772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13428017076360899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076133900461271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14079578700056486,0.0,0.12131449098444595,0.0,0.0,0.10345805508524383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551402575639566,0.0,0.0,0.10218712383707752,0.15011213481251126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184154571489947,0.0,0.10324921909257087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874153915550509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288969305186474
mentalhealth,anoxigener,2020/01/02,"Extreme anxiety about being pregnant I've posted about this in a million other subs, I know. And asking a bunch of strangers on the internet won't be much effective, for sure. But I've reached a point where even if i get a negative test, Ill still think I'm pregnant. I'm nauseous but That happens all the time anyway. My lower abdomen hurts but it often does. My boobs seem to be getting bigger but I think I noticed that before the incident, maybe I didn't. I can't stop googling about it, some people think I'm crazy, and those who say that it is possible make me super worried. You can check my posting history if you want and tell me if it's all in my head. Please help me.",3.7297826086956505,4.850264731884058,4.670260869565219,86.1584347826087,71.97101449275362,7.548985507246377,29.017391304347825,7.908726449838941,1.8047513043478265,535,21,109,7,10,174,92,138,0.156,0.731,0.113,-0.6203,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,2,8,3,0,0,7,0,8,4,3,2,3,24,22,10,0,4,7,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,11,3,0,1,6,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,1,1,15,2,9,17,5,11,0,1,0,1,7,6,1,6,3,72,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423394077835428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739458927853689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832782430503364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628269550806473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289434350681523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944228282453274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16453688702893854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19095662742134425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12471561570328865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19918669956066495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225659595992594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419999990781608,0.0,0.1869275535667012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13677936847668865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118365215723703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899421729014196,0.0,0.0,0.2042437713257247,0.17589180386271785,0.2097606137607523,0.3563981546732005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796655576110435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16938681644961495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148591949852677,0.1555588813427419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536429713918975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16262923059078774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3576692996952416,0.0,0.0,0.10849614419449052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974610586395442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889582942811225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,almondtree2018,2020/01/02,I feel I can never do things right I am so anxious and depressed. I feel like I keep making mistakes. And I can’t do anything right . Nothing specific happened. Just feeling inadequate and nervous all the time,1.5241758241758239,4.06648207692308,2.9213186813186844,84.04153846153848,100.02564102564102,4.2798534798534815,31.212454212454208,6.1826913282559595,2.110645421245421,167,10,27,2,7,54,29,39,0.317,0.589,0.094,-0.8584,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,5,0,0,1,2,12,11,4,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,6,1,0,11,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136038993424967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284374429273629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390925964400527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4210818751697774,0.1983142798821482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454767829062656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467396341672657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356191388735014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852971510817933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21409876197328015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663603679889541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4741300786133929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18442211464712874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16186816777391444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Menjy,2020/01/02,"How does pride feel? For all my life I've been told I'm really smart and shit and everyone was really proud of me. But I couldn't tell you how it feels to be proidof yourself. I now I can play music pretty well, and I'm not incredibly dumb or something, but I've never felt good about any of those things. I just want to feel good about myself for once.
Does anyone have any tips?
Thanks in advance.",2.260378657487095,3.877297240963859,3.393321858864032,91.85301204819281,76.59036144578313,6.670567986230638,19.08605851979346,7.447530270364453,0.2198034423407922,313,6,70,4,7,101,61,83,0.09699999999999999,0.693,0.21100000000000002,0.7362,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,3,7,10,2,0,0,0,6,2,1,2,2,18,15,8,0,2,5,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,2,1,0,4,4,8,8,9,9,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,1,2,40,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834394336611392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14571871212929596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647459570436487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19913593240376268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31612117769800624,0.0,0.20009748697285293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3495934723399111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719967566973605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607315744744175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22194009197545744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21201857462920165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26701382763312137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21392046634435694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043714733953832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18215151884934846,0.19186749293597308,0.0,0.0,0.13845225718229026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19913593240376268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292021427083515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18737738211799332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Julietlynn1,2020/01/02,"Increasing and decreasing antidepressant doses? Can this be harmful to the body? A Serotonin Syndrome risk? Sometimes the high of increasing my 100mg dose by 50mg feels so good and helps me lose weight and be super productive (mania possibly). And the next day, I will just take my normal 100mg dose and still feel the benefits, but not as extreme. 
Ive been on zoloft for 2 months and I do this often through the week. I don’t see much information on this when I did an internet search. Do you guys have any information on if there are risks of doing this? Oh and to throw a wrench in it, I’m prescribed lamictal as well. TIA...",3.6748780487804846,5.456541081300813,4.556593495934957,84.30171951219513,73.14634146341464,8.497235772357724,26.934146341463407,9.120678840339163,2.151560000000001,495,18,100,11,10,160,89,123,0.05,0.848,0.10099999999999999,0.728,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,2,7,8,0,2,8,0,13,6,1,0,0,17,18,13,0,2,4,0,3,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,5,7,1,0,4,0,0,3,2,4,1,0,2,4,9,4,13,13,3,14,0,1,1,0,5,5,0,2,6,65,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160614557302551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26234936597054376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523204100881118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388454438823915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19810158406845144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338612412802658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15831047566589618,0.24954344254704056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26423168399760805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18852138619536013,0.0,0.17362386227833435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511864562839393,0.0,0.2314121014675481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26626419116142297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882096372791644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335939614670033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886184190219252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758245411971268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894541368943841,0.2876108799757702,0.2123595498950411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yinzer61,2020/01/02,"My pap just passed away. Don't know what to do. I was in the Marines for almost 8 and a half years, so I'm used to death. But this is the first close family member I lost. I just feel numb right now. 

I'm not sure why I'm even posting here but then again I don't see it hurting.

Thanks.",-1.570884615384614,0.2778002769230774,0.4679807692307705,106.17889423076927,92.3846153846154,3.865384615384616,12.740384615384615,5.148860815047168,-1.6386538461538462,218,3,60,1,8,71,50,65,0.11699999999999999,0.774,0.109,0.3519,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,7,5,0,0,3,0,5,2,0,1,1,12,14,5,1,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,2,2,2,5,2,5,12,0,11,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,1,5,35,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27965198980776146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623865718090259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18445746044159012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26327412628035385,0.0,0.14120903270239085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23754982892849905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29896797286414345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348136835218698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3048599287771721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674667386682525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384979753015184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22254475859749054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632118938869266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571174441568498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412025682825992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520008239247136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17984292655264594
mentalhealth,BurnerNameHere,2020/01/02,"Stress and anxiety due to neighbor's noise Created a burner account to write this post. 

I'm experiencing high anxiety about the new neighbor that have moved in the apartment above my wife and I. Its triggering my anxiety because I'm reflecting of my old neighbor who would make noise at any point during the day and more so at night when he would have friends over for night time gaming sessions. Its so crippling to me at this point to where I don't want to go home. 

This new neighbor has only been loud once so far, but its enough to where I'm wearing headphones all the time to block out any noise, even when my wife and I are just laying in bed watching TV, I have my headphones on listening to music at a low level so that its just additional noise for me to focus on. I just have no idea how to move past this. 

I apologize if this is scatterbrained, but I don't want to start 2020 in this state. Thank you for your time and effort.",8.984627659574468,6.240636186170218,8.325,77.23250000000002,62.13829787234043,11.740425531914894,36.79787234042553,9.827888789773867,3.215104255319149,745,25,155,11,8,235,107,188,0.094,0.86,0.046,-0.7306,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,1,14,4,0,1,6,0,12,1,1,3,1,25,22,15,0,5,6,2,0,0,5,2,0,2,6,0,13,7,0,1,2,2,1,3,3,2,0,0,1,4,16,2,27,19,3,39,0,1,1,0,15,20,0,1,14,99,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067113992975606,0.0,0.3488066484019766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264926193295367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801840393452234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704217831098718,0.0,0.100385327187724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742401547453472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637715285978323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058156577071953,0.1524543617258109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17157370719317233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014518428732238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230741546486937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935780740010613,0.0,0.28525715197352386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15948375228005265,0.1618601419706623,0.0,0.11559221050485202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14508784556136015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873518141934454,0.0,0.14556058621195306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757648121403844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17409946267684984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992829943319052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26587279665072017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929057481999908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159330037691048,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,noshrek,2020/01/02,"what will happen if I have to keep everything inside because i have no one else to talk too without feeling like a burden lmao im just wondering if I will screw over my ugly state of mind even more by doing this? I always see people telling others that it’s bad to keep things in by choice and to talk to a friend or someone willing to listen. But what if you have no choice but to keep it in and the only two friends you have aren’t good at comforting those in stressful, sucky situations and you feel like all it will do is make them uncomfortable and burden them with your issues. lol what then",7.181928374655647,5.862711669421487,7.000619834710747,80.79062672176309,64.53719008264463,9.71955922865014,30.910468319559232,8.344100000000001,2.0414947658402203,476,13,98,5,6,151,82,121,0.18100000000000002,0.648,0.171,0.4033,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,4,2,0,3,11,1,1,3,1,12,1,0,1,1,22,22,11,0,3,8,0,2,2,2,4,0,1,0,0,11,5,0,3,3,0,0,0,4,5,0,2,0,4,11,6,17,18,2,7,0,0,1,1,12,5,1,5,3,74,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120847150847166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14169690423731585,0.1034508248907718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176706940730432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208880338426452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525202534546268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17161627905717058,0.24247511567830585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262227912222724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234082166499015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500699076408092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18331093268254048,0.17712832654782126,0.0,0.45252581941667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16581895366327906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327965936219712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17135405688215855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499675793257252,0.12906858919532735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11765234303676468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523321654171686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19075595821796354,0.0,0.0,0.1437908183029179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19439694015041206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27280551326842833,0.14832998274826314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274471412062376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657774977306617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635899309879466,0.18403824615903136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,its_zumari,2020/01/02,"In a Huge Slump On New Year's Eve, I broke my phone. I'm in the process of getting a new one, but the process has really messed with my anxiety. I know it's probably kind of stupid, but I'm very active online and off, and I can't really go out without my phone or contact any of my friends because all the apps I use to talk to them are phone apps.

I filed a claim with my phone company for a replacement, but I researched that the phones they send are refurbished, which I don't really like because I've dealt with fault phones because of this reason. I'm hoping because my phone type just came out 6 months ago they'll send me a new one because I loved my phone. It was brand new and so much better than my last one. 

Even worse is that I can't contact my boyfriend about much of anything because we're long distance and rely so much on my phone to talk to each other. All of my anxiety-reducing stuff is on my phone so now I'm scrambling trying to keep myself calm with other stuff like puzzles and word searches and music just to fill in all this time I have without talking to anyone. 

And what's worse is that they took a $99 deductible for my replacement which they said I was getting back, but now it turns out they're not even though I have insurance for my phone. Which I'm paying extra every month for. I haven't showered since I broke my phone and I probably won't until I get everything in order but its been so bad.

I've had like 3 or 4 panic attacks in the past few days because it's like, I'm so reliant on my phone to handle all of my everyday tasks and to contact my mom and my friends and my boyfriend but now that I don't have that I am stuck at home with no one but myself. I honestly understand how pathetic this sounds, but I live in a routine, and when any part of my routine is disrupted, it turns to chaos and I can't think or sleep or eat because I'm spending all of my time trying to fix it. I just needed somewhere to rant and since my mental health is just decaying as the minutes pass I feel this was the best place to post.",6.529117063492067,4.823977460648152,6.800449735449735,82.94666666666669,66.06018518518519,10.080423280423284,33.07142857142857,8.704169506293173,2.37176507936508,1621,54,358,20,21,526,190,432,0.166,0.742,0.092,-0.9877,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,5,2,19,22,2,1,14,0,25,4,1,3,5,60,51,36,0,2,19,1,1,4,2,2,1,2,2,0,24,24,1,1,5,0,2,7,11,9,0,4,9,3,54,13,52,40,13,49,0,2,0,1,31,17,0,6,27,231,78,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470874399805012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462598050449907,0.0,0.06447363202260267,0.0,0.0,0.058930227314956264,0.0,0.06935489604944786,0.0,0.0,0.09588016546011684,0.0,0.06480577867555601,0.07036991148285268,0.411008295746496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844619763217758,0.07453842111175231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639336327129944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054353343340815284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623902936680511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113317078425254,0.0,0.0710091634831606,0.0,0.07574503333515918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04261427739466895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302283565810379,0.0,0.1320977733462113,0.0,0.0478980156555715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958523022566021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453926950517661,0.08370861871458045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749115445334015,0.0,0.08776419150705134,0.046317841576452634,0.06869908930344219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469894179087166,0.0,0.07442039475193739,0.0745847576739639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606559257482118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493397280156947,0.0,0.0,0.09870720100322768,0.13454227998776344,0.0,0.18586551979042895,0.06249222516480658,0.0,0.32559089340353725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22844004165333226,0.0,0.0,0.09888390354982343,0.0,0.09126654951429457,0.08045437558485195,0.0,0.0,0.08805420126209218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807165205888657,0.0,0.1817352385451497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16197493096865884,0.08665342348802031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016916052197423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13943384440479525,0.0,0.08434042478232197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929598629065358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20322215143721425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054002938407146255,0.08280423889786409,0.0,0.09828817733040472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936376911991111,0.11444057673674995,0.1833439176164163,0.0,0.08773799329376987,0.0,0.07279047916689843,0.0,0.06953946272092268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624849748845275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171776141839219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05427327284180007
mentalhealth,mhajumpstart,2020/01/02,"Do you live in the Los Angeles area and want to work in mental health? Check out MHALA's Jump Start Program! **Title**: Jump Start Fellowship Program

**Location**: MHALA and an internship at an agency in LA County

**Hours**: Full time, M – F 9 AM to 5 PM for 12 weeks from March 16th, 2020 – June 5th, 2020

Typical Tasks: *Please note that this is only a brief, general outline of the Fellowship, and is not intended as a complete description. MHALA will provide reasonable work accommodation to any qualified person with a medical or psychiatric disability, providing it will not change the essential nature of the position nor cause undue hardship on the agency’s operations. MHALA is an Equal Opportunity Employer and Service Provider.*

Jump Start is a 12-week, full time training program for individuals who are interested in working in the adult community mental health field. This intensive training will cover Principles & Practices of Recovery and Psychosocial Rehabilitation to thoroughly prepare you for work in this rewarding field. Your marketability will also increase through field placements, which will include one-on-one interactions with potential employers. Our graduates move on to find employment in the mental health field. We are looking for participants who are highly motivated to work in the community mental health field. 

**Benefits**

· Participate in leading edge training that will prepare you for work in a changing mental health field. 

· Receive tuition and program books. 

· Intern with potential employers. 

· Enhance your resume. 

· Interact with and learn from nationally recognized leaders in the mental health field. 

· Collect a daily travel stipend.

**Qualifications**: 

Eligible candidates are required to have *at least* 24 college units (any courses). Candidates who meet this qualification AND have one or more of the following will be given preference: Bachelor’s degree or higher in any field, individuals who have lived experience and/or family members and individuals from un-served and/or underserved populations.

**How to Apply**: Visit our website at [www.mhajumpstart.org](http://www.mhajumpstart.org/) to download an application. *Deadline for submission is January 17th, 2020.*",7.262495927012054,11.383781785923755,7.055069403714565,57.97815966112742,75.71554252199414,10.655744542196155,37.489801238188335,9.994966539143718,5.927048432714237,1803,102,212,65,45,569,199,341,0.0,0.945,0.055,0.9489,4,0,0,0,0,0,89.0,3,5,0,11,2,4,0,0,20,0,22,7,0,6,0,32,29,16,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,2,12,15,0,1,5,2,3,11,3,0,0,1,1,1,8,4,46,20,6,43,1,0,1,0,19,23,0,3,9,131,20,26,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911220373828418,0.0,0.09363896174375673,0.0,0.1763112032023675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08877992140455153,0.1828475194058134,0.0,0.09061255901251114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453798598340022,0.08147163222549296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898878414594714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5511797468856479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131032982656216,0.0,0.0,0.08510895315486228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526256587876455,0.0,0.07257330374749836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706178035297743,0.5225625419819762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185365542371927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712451931702952,0.0657283593911998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546097009578391,0.0,0.09486617478250944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885693155853379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835113003305748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007875453099462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05097434890186238,0.0,0.1386461575608974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775005390149512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,5dtui5,2020/01/02,"No one commented on my post, maybe my opinion IS invalid after all  [https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/ej37d8/im\_feeling\_mentally\_attacked\_by\_my\_own\_unpopular/](https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/ej37d8/im_feeling_mentally_attacked_by_my_own_unpopular/) 

I've posted here about a problem that I've faced for a really long time, hoping that someone would help me.

But non of you helped me

non of you replied

I get the feeling maybe you all think that my opinions are invalid and that  I should continue to face those problems",20.52485294117647,24.223003544117645,11.69,41.53000000000004,35.617647058823536,9.15294117647059,34.64705882352941,8.841846274778883,2.845782352941177,483,12,53,4,4,119,50,68,0.107,0.79,0.10300000000000001,-0.0865,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,4,2,2,0,2,13,8,2,0,5,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,10,1,7,6,2,7,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,3,4,36,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458105968840646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839461465232876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037844351011522,0.0,0.0,0.2250753227266805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24477818811394425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20054312998757767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4553213400333099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15355711540926534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4340603679737771,0.0,0.0,0.4336712200577029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451724661937455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200631111600885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452028354645442,0.0,0.0,0.13213838415066792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16097757214515107,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tantaco1,2020/01/02,You ever get to the point where you can only feel a hint of sadness and literally nothing else. Because that's me. It's awesome. /s,1.21222222222222,3.5600354074074083,3.653333333333337,84.90000000000002,83.81481481481481,5.0814814814814815,27.51851851851852,6.42735559955562,1.3260962962962957,104,5,20,1,3,36,25,27,0.1,0.759,0.141,0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,3,0,3,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,13,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779768319477378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3809342348885693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4124832472142083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305701748310887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382441484978596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4375497515099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468128704276922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4310727646256515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SaveTheGiraffeFund,2020/01/02,"I keep hurting the ones I love and I feel like I can’t stop. Help please, advice anything. I believe I have anxiety and my grades and classes have always been a struggle for me. Due to this whenever my mother (my only parent) asks me about them I always lie. I always resort to lying no matter what. It’s become a subliminal thing where I don’t even think about it it just becomes my first instinct when the topic comes up. I don’t want to hurt her because the lying has hurt her more and more over the years. It’s a struggle. I’m just so scared she’ll be disappointed in me and I’ll have to accept the failure I’ve become that I just lie to make it “easier” on myself and in my mind on her too. It’s been going on for years. It just happened again and I’m struggling this time. I’ve talked to my therapist about it yet it keeps happening. I get comfortable and I always find myself going back to it when my classes aren’t going well. Please help. Any advice would be nice and I could use just about anything at this point. I’m tired of falling back on this and letting myself but more importantly her down nonstop. I want to be successful in life and move forward in my life from this habit and move towards a happier life. So please again any help or advice, anything really would help. I’m desperate at this point. :(",2.6736988968202446,4.4773213731343295,3.9685269305645687,87.36401362751461,75.94029850746269,6.601168072680077,23.21933809214796,7.423996415210882,0.9376091499026602,1040,31,211,13,23,341,129,268,0.131,0.7,0.16899999999999998,0.9103,2,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,2,22,15,0,4,9,0,18,5,0,2,0,36,39,18,0,5,7,2,1,1,0,3,4,0,0,0,19,13,0,3,4,0,0,8,5,8,1,2,2,1,35,7,30,29,3,38,0,4,0,1,15,18,0,1,15,148,54,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259612856574835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947486045732096,0.0,0.0,0.12044462814550932,0.0,0.06774644456670957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218626474416548,0.0,0.08278955186543419,0.0,0.0,0.1361909033170914,0.0,0.0539839889787935,0.29341526729568845,0.0,0.09977427053457093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628466943057054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070616593390625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058491565755335616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044777464689072184,0.06326568196159932,0.0,0.0,0.08094018894991653,0.07532718603886385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04626777489567386,0.0,0.15098824871513286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15662267069757654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374336012046489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844087433762518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574284134437945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09055631032030133,0.1876528961073603,0.04326484866836495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992683658642774,0.0,0.059112992950874375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941809335947762,0.0,0.0,0.18824576947530672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0600090305648472,0.06735216760219878,0.0,0.0,0.09833291318844974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916294836618054,0.1674314165792377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056732369175965074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886617675189745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403825332596249,0.0,0.2777393984050518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117937356800456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282238579863366,0.05883384120843205,0.056744237271394826,0.0,0.0,0.05163874244546078,0.1017841185885298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648547176829958,0.0,0.0,0.1044673234643632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962406225755513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581778475542255,0.0,0.0,0.11405658886230953
mentalhealth,F14ming0,2020/01/02,"How do I handle others joking about suicide / people saying they want to die My gf just sent a photo she drew of her self hanged with a noose because she was sad about her plant dying and I feel so shit I am shaking I can’t breath and it feels like I am going to die my hands are so cold. This happened every time she mentions suicide and so on. I get so fucking scared that I am going to lose her. But she has many times said that she isn’t suicidal.  Even if I’ve been suicidal and sometimes still think about it I’ve never tried to kms, and no one really close to he either. I just can’t take suicide and self harm things with my friends I literary panic and feel so shit. Idk what to do to stop going such a pussy I just want to be strong.",2.443206751054852,3.536323974683544,3.6601898734177247,92.27209915611814,75.07594936708861,6.279324894514768,21.39451476793249,6.42735559955562,0.17228945147679253,580,13,131,4,12,189,96,158,0.33,0.601,0.069,-0.9949,0,0,0,0,0,4,9.0,0,0,1,2,15,13,3,3,3,0,13,5,4,1,1,25,28,15,8,3,6,0,4,1,2,0,0,2,0,2,8,10,0,1,4,1,0,6,5,9,0,1,4,7,22,4,15,23,1,13,0,2,0,1,18,2,3,1,6,86,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122990513048243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638116208966328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717748833496901,0.0,0.09845010002270384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17724669603643398,0.08347676059859606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027704385107947,0.10802477388358328,0.061048641991090974,0.0,0.19922348895005576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332895165873772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05708639032478531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072384723062574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846627852832085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012094897210744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917972782236249,0.0,0.0,0.13709681564442236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100820115969211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485629259110396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111499063637929,0.0929228051133605,0.11698596951696742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437974315588765,0.0,0.2398870974113139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556638806830467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331555179176584,0.0976907757317936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6390677612682719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785570773335069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762910831551784,0.07487195211029718,0.0,0.0,0.13627087568102836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933262183169343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378408242956098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Be_Bet,2020/01/02,"Tissue: a project aiming to increase awareness around speaking out Tissue is a project that aims to raise awareness surrounding communication about your own mental health. By filling out this questionnaire you agree to any information being used by those involved in the project or those who will massively impact its success.

​

**Read the description of the below questionnaire for more information**

[**https://forms.gle/CUANEEC5bSa9TPQ66**](https://forms.gle/CUANEEC5bSa9TPQ66)",12.311406250000005,17.703342328125004,7.740375,50.96712500000001,71.03125,8.185,37.65,8.548686976883017,4.92554875,415,20,40,9,10,113,50,64,0.0,0.8740000000000001,0.126,0.8176,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,0,3,1,0,1,0,7,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,13,2,3,8,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,1,0,32,8,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35579466355645856,0.3990121149913993,0.22330656689780895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29232377069307713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3490477484841548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33092521949796416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32846431368373435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836109568540368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3990121149913993,0.0
mentalhealth,hamburgerbenny2011,2020/01/02,Why don’t I feel anything? My dog has cancer and had to be put to sleep today. My mom called me in tears but I’m not even crying. My heart is beating so fast but I’m just blank. I feel so fucking numb and I don’t know what to feel. He’s been in pain for awhile so I feel relieved in some ways but I don’t know why I’m not sobbing. I’m crying but I don’t know I don’t feel completely terrible and I don’t know what the fuck is wrong with me,-2.7366346153846166,-1.0735663942307667,0.2200000000000024,105.06250000000004,102.3653846153846,3.3692307692307697,13.230769230769232,5.148860815047168,-1.4672384615384613,341,7,93,2,16,117,54,104,0.258,0.628,0.114,-0.9571,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,2,0,1,0,12,7,2,0,0,21,27,10,0,0,7,1,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,9,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,2,5,13,1,8,24,1,7,0,1,0,2,3,3,3,1,2,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984806826155052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735301328942785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17818131334533452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3733473678119395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224531478596628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4296397740800706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31421791537498617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20138249469346112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3735834693425655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19903441818965664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18083063477625894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17083899310338346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17006507332599813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16108547032578474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13489232170709406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30669306343084224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858052740726951,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nirorosororo,2020/01/02,Please help me overcome over-apologizing.. Please..,9.657142857142855,14.411569,5.682857142857145,66.7871428571429,73.28571428571428,8.514285714285714,35.57142857142857,8.841846274778883,4.429685714285716,41,2,5,1,1,11,6,7,0.0,0.444,0.556,0.6124,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920043375838624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9564169942196812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tdzines,2020/01/02,"Had to call the suicide hotline for the first time today. *trigger warning* I'm on a new anxiety medication due to severe hypochondria and GAD. Every time I think I have it under control, it comes back up to kick my ass. I am constantly terrified that something is wrong with my body and that doctors are lying to me, regardless of the evidence and test results. I was so distraught that I had to call the suicide hotline for the first time (didn't want to call my family because they get very worried when I'm like this). I'm in tears as I write this, and will be going to my doctor in an hour. Not even sure what ""problem"" to bring up first. Don't know why I'm writing this, I just don't want to feel alone and crazy anymore.",2.9582653061224486,4.583330081632656,4.1181122448979615,87.35635204081635,74.71428571428571,6.8047619047619055,27.89625850340137,7.492282038375204,1.5435401360544219,570,23,116,7,12,186,94,147,0.27699999999999997,0.7070000000000001,0.015,-0.9903,0,1,1,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,1,4,5,5,0,1,7,0,12,5,2,3,1,22,25,8,2,4,2,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,9,7,0,1,3,0,0,3,4,3,0,3,4,1,13,2,20,19,0,22,0,0,0,1,6,6,1,0,14,75,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310632617960467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570253479220028,0.0,0.13703122413912744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624707900412876,0.0,0.08422943092805066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15347987884485342,0.0,0.0,0.4232725194405024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902444439953315,0.0,0.14931672848991334,0.15497360133309812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828533606838413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126245375453697,0.0,0.116417337416519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13025790725355485,0.0,0.0698647958498032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3525915442793963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721900775302221,0.0,0.07852732206145101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607330335311835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593667530655376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750471114604274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919550892462654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344906149364189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13221361077328272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15609699940016544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637289751251294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.302279295514908,0.0,0.13022711705990486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853615496426931,0.0,0.0,0.2417106611960418,0.0,0.13097255163092825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400780826357605,0.16299690653531546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468031102931153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14032214259243594,0.0,0.0,0.15107129651462736,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlueReflection0,2020/01/02,"What's causing this? Hi :) I'm new here. I'm pretty confused, not worried or stressed, but confused.

It might sound horrible but I dont seem to love anyone. I'm the most apathetic person I know and i dont seem to have any feelings. Logically I know that how I feel is wrong and I think to myself a lot ""i should be feeling guilty for this and that"" yet i can never ever believe it or feel any guilt. I've spoken about it so much and nobody seems to get it. I'm mildly autistic and I guess that could have something to do with it??? But I know that I'm like any normal person socially and I dont find relationships hard at all apart from my social anxiety at times.

I'm perfectly happy with who I am and my life but I think to myself ""but it's wrong to be happy with yourself if who you are is selfish"". I feel no connection to anyone if I'm honest and I've never been able to love friends properly. I think I love my mom at least a bit but I think that I could easily just leave my family at any time and be perfectly happy. That's what im planning for the future and I know how absolutely ruthless that is.. 
I just really need to know what's causing all of this. I've searched so much.. I thought I had depersonalisation disorder or something but I dont think I do. I feel detached from the world around me quite a lot but never myself. I feel like I'm living in a dream. I've had no traumatic experiences either, my family are incredibly kind people and dont force me into anything, they just love me which makes me think even more... why dont I love them?",0.8390753724802806,3.0089615490797605,3.208829097283086,88.64664417177916,83.81595092024541,6.1797020157756375,20.663978965819453,7.447530270364453,0.7034528659070989,1219,37,263,20,35,419,146,326,0.19,0.64,0.17,-0.8183,0,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,2,4,13,22,0,4,7,0,27,6,0,5,8,83,66,28,0,7,18,1,8,2,1,2,1,1,0,2,22,16,0,0,24,1,0,0,12,7,0,0,4,9,42,15,26,55,11,18,0,0,0,5,18,9,0,15,11,175,64,0,0.07064073839517004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921524979314103,0.0,0.05403997152010145,0.0,0.0,0.09878729352976147,0.0,0.05813130871823439,0.06288523387795038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958792188448846,0.0,0.0,0.07712139053668683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513499443757796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280176303868998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096040622742831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49674251576623296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04665754148133888,0.06389859213702828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910019704543133,0.13318760258849596,0.0,0.2500265589450897,0.05046575762419641,0.0,0.0,0.06456435512830579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05457685925218031,0.0,0.03690687022251977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781873744954626,0.0,0.0,0.2255951387425545,0.06328022634700241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07630411947835312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356145854886999,0.19411151203538396,0.0,0.0,0.07479834224306497,0.0,0.0,0.049895642623334784,0.06902299315671669,0.0,0.06237706620125751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011245929372626,0.3187801220010313,0.0,0.04715324141309934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493866017395343,0.0,0.08273357904163599,0.0,0.0,0.1038581414959677,0.052379212434472494,0.16344747694122086,0.06822526533235806,0.0,0.0,0.0692129251783582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04897339350475375,0.12336153605272675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186702675176113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513512062362544,0.0,0.0,0.04525426587543115,0.0,0.0,0.0758417164780686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19292602546312232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440186735918443,0.0,0.10876538322165266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091872716152576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27158239689374664,0.0,0.056080855638716016,0.08238236527198729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374227893765283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173909882333679,0.0,0.0,0.15446911613244813,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jyndaru,2020/01/02,"How to tell my psychiatrist I want to see a new psych - complicated office/insurance set up. So I've been seeing a psychiatrist for about a year. I've given her a chance because my doctor's office and insurance are set up in such a way that I must see a psychiatrist who is in the same office as my primary care. This office shares information about their patients between the primary care, psychiatrist, and therapist (when necessary). I like this set up because it makes most things easier.

I get along well with my primary care and don't want to lose him because my insurance is shit and it took so long to find him. But my psych and I have always clashed. Our personalities just don't mesh. I'm bad at being assertive, which I'm working on, but she seems to take advantage of this by pushing meds and changes in lifestyle which I don't want. I always at least try whatever she suggests and I tell her if/when it doesn't work out. 

She called today accusing me of not taking my meds because I cancelled our last appointment (end of November) and her next available was not until Jan 7. I told her she sent in refills and I'd been taking them as normal. She asked ""are you being honest with me?"" I have never lied or given a reason for her to believe I'd lie.

Now, since I have to go to that same office for my PCP and therapist (and for a new psych if I do switch) I'll probably be running into her - and to be honest I just don't like her at this point. I'm always respectful though and I'm sure she has no idea how I feel about her. But after being prescribed meds that made me very sick and being asked ""are you sure the problem isn't just that you don't want to take them, because you said one time that you dislike taking so many meds?"" She didn't believe I had the spins and vomiting for the 5 days I took them. And I have been over prescribed. I was on 10 meds; down to 8 now - still too many, I think, for a 32 year old. And 5 of those are prescribed by her. (I have bipolar disorder, insomnia, anxiety, high blood pressure, and nerve damage.) Being told to go to bed at 8pm is also ridiculous (I don't have to be up early for work and have never gone to bed that early, even as a child.) And being told to quit marijuana - which was understandable and I did because she said it can make other meds less effective. But I started again because it helps with my pain and anxiety issues, and because I saw no change in the efficacy of my meds either way. 

I'm just so tired of it all, but I'm not sure if I should leave her or just live with the fact that we often disagree and that she just rubs me the wrong way. How would I even explain my reasoning to her, especially in such a way not to raise any red flags to my therapist, PCP, or the new psychiatrist? And what if I end up not liking the other psych either - or liking them less? There are only two in that office. Would I be able to go back to her if I decide she was better than the new psychiatrist? 

Sorry for the long post and thank you to anyone who replies. I'm just so worried and stressed about seeing her this Tuesday.",4.923157894736843,4.992004872611466,5.924689909487097,82.0206620851492,68.74522292993629,9.03090848139457,28.468990948709354,8.841846274778883,1.973279617834396,2412,75,506,38,38,802,252,628,0.11,0.785,0.10400000000000001,-0.8979,0,0,0,0,0,0,72.0,3,6,5,8,36,28,2,2,23,0,50,9,2,9,8,101,101,55,0,14,27,0,2,4,0,4,7,2,2,2,30,35,0,0,12,0,0,9,18,10,1,2,23,10,85,18,76,64,9,71,0,2,6,0,59,24,1,11,34,355,115,8,0.05841353964176321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04671328654728744,0.14581423317913053,0.0,0.0,0.03972321004202478,0.0,0.08937239588211986,0.0,0.0,0.04084410509996715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921754863364116,0.0,0.0,0.04491640633189682,0.048772865665691424,0.28486681272596626,0.0,0.0,0.13162411196774776,0.0,0.05166202888719133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05964675499949981,0.0,0.1786694901693524,0.0,0.12358755916407012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03767190063737338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694697714120282,0.059788733016953234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347411613094512,0.0,0.0,0.07716318404434311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029535640773360305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05338891698207438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0305186635328825,0.0,0.09959328215689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0391533643173038,0.06171711175739484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06594177613506844,0.0,0.06096855907195265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04761483115931716,0.0,0.06185150423133441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415161954843593,0.0,0.05158022568933359,0.1033882888321326,0.0,0.06534980925435828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527230358933756,0.07798298259889186,0.11844432165833199,0.0,0.0,0.4541899190648327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010424570443976,0.2256646423352788,0.062123462096174,0.0,0.05723286648012797,0.0,0.0,0.06129518363901415,0.0,0.0395825262155469,0.044426129112468016,0.06215612463960243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05100444969993019,0.0,0.0,0.05521967588604975,0.0,0.05594402398306345,0.0,0.06297967547141818,0.055893868516321714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062129989673733226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201176950260434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112930553059698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861921130720522,0.05317749263074167,0.0,0.0,0.05996065901714963,0.04832028362052953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538917524202531,0.04134540401127855,0.0,0.04664912821375733,0.0,0.06691251230089054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516220944954754,0.0,0.21959856077950715,0.0,0.10211201665576214,0.053779339195577286,0.0,0.20346786524178487,0.038807360160193496,0.03742903756708802,0.05739100611629229,0.0,0.03406140471435444,0.06713777083939255,0.05536920546447685,0.16744992115485566,0.12979918370971932,0.03965895905131162,0.0,0.05706154041072356,0.0608105548311953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048197287765217256,0.13781527649335068,0.1854637953646616,0.0,0.0,0.05252078732203795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275772576833091,0.059321784966900534,0.0,0.08299060519036118,0.06386603568719082,0.0,0.07523280873233879
mentalhealth,kritikal1991,2020/01/02,"10 Tips For Positive Mental Health In 2020 I wrote an article on my 10 Tips for Positive Mental Health in 2020 and wanted to share it with you all. I hope this is allowed 😊


[10 Tips for Positive Mental Health](https://kritikalpowers.com/10-tips-for-positive-mental-health-2020/)",7.870000000000001,11.025644043478264,6.08195652173913,71.94076086956524,65.08695652173913,9.817391304347826,28.89130434782609,10.125756701596842,3.4104086956521744,230,8,34,6,4,67,29,46,0.0,0.6809999999999999,0.319,0.9423,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,1,7,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,2,8,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,18,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7119883139761123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632082697598533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6750219421433291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876943302725366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hayate_Immelmann_,2020/01/02,"So how do I accept insanity/madness? According to reddit,I'm practically a deranged madman for being afraid of North Korea.  


If that's the case,then I accept my insanity.  


But,the question is,how to cope with it?",3.3520000000000003,5.9358422,6.0100000000000025,69.785,77.0,8.0,27.5,8.841846274778883,2.7945,168,7,27,4,4,60,34,40,0.098,0.741,0.161,0.3372,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,6,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Charlotte288,2020/01/02,"Therapy? Hii guys,

First time poster over here.

I was wondering if any of you have some advise on making the step to going to therapy. I'm not doing that well mental health wise at the moment but find it hard to pick up the phone to make an appointment cause every time I'm about to do it, I think to myself that people are gonna judge me or think that I'm doing it for attention.

I would love to hear some other people perspectives.
❤️",1.430390720390719,3.5001105494505502,3.265421245421248,89.66013431013431,80.86813186813188,6.681807081807082,16.704517704517706,7.793537801064563,0.32337997557997555,344,6,73,6,9,115,66,91,0.033,0.879,0.087,0.7809999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,7,2,0,4,0,16,19,3,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,7,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,1,2,6,3,14,16,2,10,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,5,4,47,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13724744377118597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20732914953219286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17004567602388382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184463752394374,0.17167164512842736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470139983110393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19983778620023784,0.0,0.0,0.18079492904616426,0.0,0.0,0.21452979148374585,0.2274706524550963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821543090647752,0.0,0.2694385727645799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20339142321908965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27983911294151864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4616073487954258,0.0,0.0,0.2586417222305972,0.0,0.0,0.2353707428657084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146428239746548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21886984238113646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337019097085293,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,campoole82,2020/01/02,"I feel like my therapist isn’t listening I told her outside of therapy I have no one to talk to I feel lonely and when I have panic attacks or can’t get get out of bed I need somebody to talk to she tells me “I’m waiting on others to make me happy and your letting the negative take over” I’m 19 I was bullied a lot growing up so for a long time I’ve felt like nobody was there there are no females in my life that I’m affectionate with and I don’t have anybody to get out with and when I go by myself I don’t know where to go.....I’m in my room sleeping to keep the pain away but I just need help not feeling alone is she not listening or am I just not doing anything right

When I’m not sleeping I’m reaching out to others giving advice making others laugh and taking care of my responsibilities but I feel empty but she takes up our time telling me why I’m thinking negative my own father called me a disappointment and the worst part is I couldn’t leave because I had not where to go",0.7396440823327595,2.789967089622646,2.9738421955403105,90.90503430531734,83.29245283018868,5.552658662092625,21.900514579759864,6.782984794422108,0.4953037735849058,781,26,172,9,22,266,114,212,0.17300000000000001,0.705,0.12300000000000001,-0.8435,0,3,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,1,0,0,10,12,1,1,6,0,17,4,2,2,0,38,49,15,0,3,12,1,5,2,0,0,2,2,2,0,4,11,0,2,7,0,0,3,14,6,0,1,5,7,31,6,27,42,4,23,0,2,0,0,17,14,0,3,8,120,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979432994473866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756587600137465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930304889155866,0.0,0.0,0.15110677125874403,0.12479276488777935,0.0,0.0,0.08096843626725668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13562842044001858,0.0,0.13542318567984635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686397477823067,0.09488967811964698,0.1275321195428082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081855817105203,0.12741713358675175,0.2264612642463006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413938949788957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902930188428579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806030548785955,0.0,0.0,0.07299673982314007,0.0,0.0,0.1406417133808094,0.0,0.13582180530689458,0.0938177031514756,0.12978244876987982,0.0,0.0,0.11754529065676872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292243629248765,0.0,0.0,0.1773224503357786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19697501204993945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000515631881857,0.0,0.1413343777983042,0.1558406509122086,0.0,0.1438357303082457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343119258281327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26584036884560663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996019407561307,0.21351821832018447,0.2321885159902165,0.0,0.15189611743699022,0.15421920367267405,0.0,0.08510842281121304,0.0,0.0,0.15490178868623564,0.0,0.0,0.1269192728044142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11985323545616625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kk8895,2020/01/02,"BPD coping tips? Recently diagnosed. Extreme fear of abandonment. Stuck in toxic relationship with my FP of 3 years. Advice, please. 🥺",3.3110606060606034,4.72739495454546,4.612727272727274,68.52242424242425,122.1818181818182,8.73939393939394,26.393939393939394,7.793537801064563,4.123066666666668,107,5,14,4,6,35,21,22,0.32,0.595,0.086,-0.743,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,5,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335131397892471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4298537651700175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34641099641818884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38405592440778896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746434827395739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369912918620006,0.3664270765380573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21978517300907455
mentalhealth,NadiaJ28,2020/01/02,"Has anyone tried the online therapy app called Talkspace? I recently discovered Talkspace is provided free for a year at my workplace, so I signed up for it. I'm not sure how effective it's going to be though, has anyone had experience with them?",6.510144927536235,7.578514652173915,6.807391304347828,73.56731884057974,65.52173913043478,11.35072463768116,34.89855072463768,11.20814326018867,4.2622115942029,198,9,35,6,3,64,39,46,0.106,0.823,0.071,-0.1471,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,2,1,6,7,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,3,6,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4588127521544497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350139726580115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209324848167613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18645966074605827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239467798155568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30921854240649244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.375196596471451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32234425752114343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22274984487207608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21127756344710213
mentalhealth,elfocavallino,2020/01/02,"I did this and hope it can be helpful for somebody My therapist shared with me the ""emotions wheel"" but I didn't like it because it was too confusing to read... So I did my own version using the characters from Inside Out (Pixar).

[https://imgur.com/gallery/DRWpSEi](https://imgur.com/gallery/DRWpSEi)

This is not, in any way, for profit. I just wanted to share with the community. 

I also will gladly listen to feedback and maybe upload different versions with backgrounds or something.

​

Thanks :)",7.212069444444445,11.078361512500004,6.019166666666668,67.74027777777779,71.375,6.555555555555558,28.88888888888889,7.793537801064563,2.3674722222222218,411,16,56,6,9,123,62,80,0.054000000000000006,0.698,0.248,0.9527,1,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,1,3,0,8,0,0,1,0,14,13,6,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,4,1,8,7,11,7,3,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,3,1,45,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19896979178477736,0.0,0.26958082239211434,0.30232610300724605,0.16919637677566926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15166961747891075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599489530706661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798728726664214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667691854222541,0.0,0.0,0.2471201542454345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155387499044587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.249958721411913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24887298455861045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915427481592223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22906681830735556,0.0,0.2888825412378092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21488820046901405,0.0,0.0,0.1467520211882619,0.19749034736597912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30232610300724605,0.0
mentalhealth,Grundym,2020/01/02,"A cop saved me today I was at my lowest point, I went into work with no sleep, no food and a nose full of blow to hopefully get me through the day. I wasn’t on site for more than a hour before I threw up whatever stomach acid I had. I just gathered my tools and left. I drove for about an hour and parked beside an overpass for the highway. I was a complete mess making that walk, I could barely see through the tears in my eyes and could only hear my heart pounding in my ears. It felt really surreal and like a dream. Turns out this cop was tucked away doing radar. I didn’t even get to the look over the edge before this cop had his hands on me. I convinced myself I wasn’t going to jump but honestly I don’t know what would’ve happened if that cop wasn’t there.",2.7062962962962978,3.7121808024691374,3.660185185185188,92.86583333333336,74.30864197530863,6.6345679012345675,22.141975308641968,6.816661863887847,0.3349160493827159,598,14,137,5,12,192,104,162,0.055,0.857,0.08800000000000001,0.6986,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,12,0,13,8,7,1,0,18,28,7,0,4,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,8,1,0,2,1,0,6,7,1,0,0,13,9,23,5,22,13,2,24,0,0,3,0,3,14,0,2,5,90,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693799094831734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30681166096695506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18902117116446,0.0,0.0,0.2878793761550893,0.0,0.0,0.1162663139045619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190738830027956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730980067937695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21799646926751556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18837873609921596,0.0,0.10245783205454542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594218698490507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20318976002821312,0.213633822112443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17905968504937073,0.35508088894591294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907770851081624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195875805657437,0.0,0.0,0.08807617751283403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15139061316800645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033894999528907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711180443681864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17042379231342294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549260825034502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366059515664953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18041117068178592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088528357373314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19609393063844094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671222689802184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312466961486886,0.0,0.0,0.1280664313578533,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ohCamelBlack,2020/01/02,"Sometimes I just lost control of my body and just watch It happens sometimes, I do not know how to describe it so I'm gonna give an example case:

* Once I was walking, I was pretty upset/depressed at the moment and I lost control of my body. I was walking and walking. I couldn't decide where to go, how fast would I go. I just watched all through it. After sometime, IDK, like 5-10 minutes, my steps slowed down and I got back the control

I do not have time gaps during those moments, I see and feel everything happens. What is happening to me?",1.6820909090909095,3.851167754545454,3.0063636363636377,91.31954545454546,80.54545454545455,5.090909090909091,28.181818181818183,6.1124844417494595,1.1263636363636356,423,20,86,3,11,137,70,110,0.067,0.8759999999999999,0.057,-0.0085,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,5,8,3,0,0,3,0,9,2,2,5,1,21,23,8,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,3,3,0,0,6,3,2,0,0,6,4,16,1,9,14,1,16,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,0,8,58,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300264381848728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3264773440356997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4944821119844189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265758447296279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207755848200214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430704650769593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14097676832216938,0.16704073350731746,0.0,0.11753679110890675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38986691709204657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08076499752142037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179689927672935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208469100375708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650687679106387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495104586177193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710754907584395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4360395679272627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569315978781229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439568260770793,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RainbowXplosion,2020/01/02,"I don't know how to help my GF (Seeking Advice) She says she's going through a 'Mental Block'. (I know the source of it if that helps anyone looking to help.) She can't ""feel"" anything emotionally. Only fleeting. She feels like a lot of her past is slowly coming up from being buried and it's affecting her life. I feel like it's had her whole outlook scrambled and she is still piecing it together. She feels lost. Not just affecting our relationship but in all blocks of her life. I'm trying to be as supportive as I can, but it's really hard on me also. She doesn't show affection because of this mental block and she knows I notice, and I feel like that only makes it harder. Still I do everything I can and I do my best to be supportive and understanding, but I don't want to be too much and end up pushing her away. I try to act fine but I also have a history of depression and anxiety issues and this whole thing is making my mental health issues flare up big time.

I've suggested therapy to her a few times but she says she waits until she gives up on being able to help herself before thinking about doing that. I know therapy helps me immensely and I would 100% be going to therapy right now if I had health insurance.

I'm not sure what I'm asking for here. I just want to help this woman I want to marry one day get back to the bubbly, loving, affectionate person I fell in love with.",2.6900382803297984,4.440687607773854,4.436311837455829,84.25868448174327,75.74911660777386,7.684864546525326,23.099087161366313,8.472884824447931,1.4454005889281505,1095,32,221,21,24,370,146,283,0.09,0.745,0.165,0.9786,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,0,0,2,13,13,0,0,6,0,22,6,0,6,2,51,54,23,0,6,11,0,6,3,1,1,4,2,0,2,14,12,0,4,11,1,0,6,6,2,0,1,3,9,42,11,34,44,8,27,0,2,1,2,36,11,0,3,13,157,56,0,0.08912475637292848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709168043645832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425460709430866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818019468010461,0.0,0.0,0.062318101909754064,0.0,0.07334208057352883,0.0,0.08331961625094148,0.0,0.08373564241994162,0.06853143630788766,0.0,0.05432962425885622,0.0,0.07583860332488107,0.0,0.0935309332528812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767730859700279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05747809475340546,0.0,0.07676302206821847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025335505529084,0.07893808051721947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009958423052234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253207736072585,0.19101223128236536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04656400671619063,0.08549658744870875,0.1013033058551037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983827582393978,0.0,0.0,0.18947089672585007,0.0,0.0,0.3584306731652341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604618062937364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195922541155286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12590290231675924,0.13062556229543806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484234870978741,0.0,0.09729019975471176,0.0757706807368153,0.16087714457875432,0.0,0.1189829338880099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694503761724925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551695076000325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146912584548697,0.0,0.0,0.06039324148512064,0.13556678667389388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507966463434903,0.0,0.07782029956273251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05709560110231381,0.0,0.0,0.09568663433555984,0.0,0.07611205497308543,0.0,0.1417511669470788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235029113312364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022754347117054,0.08399902813331828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057657786359414,0.0,0.059210527918101274,0.05710754518383805,0.0,0.0,0.10393872432671926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101971854912245,0.0,0.0,0.0927820145375682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15770427135470155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990092153236665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331166981314583,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ServantofHades,2020/01/02,"Anxiety and PTSD I was diagnosed with anxiety several years ago. But after almost 2 years at a job with borderline abusive bosses, I am now starting to have episodes where I black out, but don’t fall, and even continue on in conversations, only to come too a few seconds later. I also have spells where I feel like I am moving through a dream. I have been told to go to a trauma therapist for PTSD treatment by a “regular” doctor. Does this sound reasonable/logical. This possibility terrifies me, but I don’t know if that terror is “real” or just heightened by my anxiety. 
Not looking for an online diagnosis, just some advice from others who may know a thing or two while I search for affordable professional help IRL.",8.24680170575693,7.752657283582092,8.87123667377399,65.55574626865672,61.98507462686568,12.7317697228145,37.79957356076759,12.031772070788634,4.83322302771855,572,25,97,17,7,193,97,134,0.152,0.779,0.069,-0.882,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,1,7,0,11,2,0,1,0,23,19,10,0,1,9,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,6,6,0,0,3,1,0,4,3,2,0,2,3,4,11,1,18,15,2,19,0,0,2,0,4,6,0,6,10,75,17,4,0.0,0.1986244436530412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381459468825665,0.14860159029293896,0.0,0.16786593984700235,0.0,0.0,0.1340606055533748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3847294334423787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14440589385943234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701497488514554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715853100039958,0.14670175358274415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072377843656382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476316226381109,0.11976111874753904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527293483182883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236468503487128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663555398568714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18425968765789744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189979967514407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14077428473040002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17817340501867998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274967832798679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889874428718128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3919213320743463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19080953815056528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18938401133376412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11865553268212067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946414481552542,0.11137170144808736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018595913577646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637586482707921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21590764944206692
mentalhealth,oree94,2020/01/02,"Do I have ADHD/depression/anxiety? Or am I just simply lazy? Hi, everyone. I'm sorry if you get a lot of posts like mine. 

I'm a 24 y/o woman in college (senior year) and my life is in shambles. It has been for the longest time, but I feel like I've hit yet another new low. My gpa is in the lowest it has been because of the missed final papers and homeworks. I've long given up any hope of living a happy life, but regardless, I still want to try everything I can to fix myself. 

My mental health journey--

For the longest time I thought I had depression, but the two therapists didn't think to refer me to a a psychiatrist and the doctor I visited didn't think I was depressed, he said I showed more symptoms of anxiety than depression. Still, I received no suggestion of general anxiety disorder treatments. Recently I came accross something called adult ADHD and I thought the symptom descripions really match me. I took several self diagnosis tests but only half of them came out as positive. So I want to hear other people's thoughts on it based on my symptoms. I'm not asking to be diagnosed here, of course. I'm going to a doctor as soon as possible. I just want to hear if these ring any bells to people. I just want some sort of confirmation and maybe an assurance that I'm not crazy for throwing money at random hospital bills. So these are my symptoms.


As an adult--

I procrastinate

It takes ages to to start a task, sometimes I never start

I'm forgetful

I'm bad at time management (missed 2 plane rides, almost missed a plane ride because I underestimated the time it would take to get to the departure gate)

I'm awful at making a plan and sticking to it

It's hard to remember names and faces, even some people I care about and like

I get hyper-focused on things that interest me

I am awful at keeping in touch with people

I put off answering messages all the time

I'm addicted to internet and smart phone

I'm unable to meet deadlines

Easy tasks that I find boring are hard to do

Small talks are hard for me sometimes

It's hard to stay focused listening or watching something (keep zoning out)

I get hung up on one task, am therefore unable to move on to doing other tasks

I hate waiting in line

I constantly seek distractions. I am always reading something/watching something/listening to something.


I feel apathetic/emotionally numb sometimes

I feel stupid, lazy, and inhuman.

I feel like other people are naturally capable of things that I am uncapable of doing, like I was born without an organ that other people have been born with

As a child--

I missed lot of social cues

I didn't follow the social rules and caused a lot of frustrations in peers

I was always an outsider

Tasks that required patience and concentration frustrated me, to the point of giving up (origami)

I would quit a game mid-way if it looked like I was going to lose

I sometimes wandered off to do random things when given a group task

I was horrible at doing homeworks and studying for subjects I was bad at

I missed a lot of lessons on purpose, because I didn't do homeworks for them

So yeah. Basically everything I can think of.


This is basically my last hope. I tried therapy, I tried getting diagnosis for depression. None worked. Now it's like I'm throwing the mental health spaghetti at the wall and hoping anything to stick. At the back of my head there is always the thought that this is all meaningless waste of time, that I know the answer to my own question already but I'm ignoring it because I'm too much of a coward, that despite all these efforts to diagnose myself, I'm just simply lazy and nothing more. 

That's my biggest fear. Because laziness is not a medical condition. There is no treatment for laziness. I have no excuse. 

I used to have some hopes in my life. I wanted to adopt 2 cats and live in a small apartment. But even that seems impossible to achieve now. I'm so behind my peers, I have no credentials, I have no qualifications, I have no career plan. I don't even know what industry I want to get a job in. I don't know how jobs or companies work. I'm a baby, but only I'm not, because I'm a god damn 24 year old. Now I just brace myself for death. If I just hold it long enough, if I close my eyes and hum to myself, some day I'll be dead. That looks like the only realistic future plan I can have. Does any of this makes sense? Probably not. I can't even make sense of what I wrote. I'm sorry for rambling. 

Tl;dr-- I'm suspecting I have ADHD and I want to get some perspective from people if my symptoms sound familiar or relatable.",3.6349365136949032,5.499736538031322,5.013344216699924,80.63713223290407,73.44071588366891,8.098651671806035,28.74774774774775,8.803115344985871,2.410381812685169,3611,149,677,73,74,1204,369,894,0.17800000000000002,0.715,0.107,-0.997,4,0,5,0,0,1,100.0,0,1,2,11,29,40,5,2,42,3,58,20,3,7,5,126,147,46,2,20,29,0,9,8,0,2,17,6,4,5,39,25,0,6,23,3,2,15,21,23,0,3,25,19,91,17,106,117,18,89,0,11,4,0,32,38,1,29,42,432,130,20,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054134868771482984,0.17903885290336954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04972560691174027,0.0,0.05479916071394584,0.0,0.1239590324541114,0.0,0.0,0.10130802546686332,0.05207104957566036,0.11396537375103433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04086454364769624,0.0,0.046423800202700975,0.0,0.0,0.038184161784657215,0.08292520018270426,0.18162740553806556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050706668872868635,0.11359171522482918,0.050629938855727,0.05101274550474882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05366297286716962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032025490597886175,0.0,0.171082458599789,0.10080424337694957,0.0,0.0,0.056912705510416176,0.10165473335286787,0.04345630649414189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055858895349685134,0.0,0.05131029075243627,0.0,0.13119533569078612,0.0,0.0,0.0474506266370983,0.08925934280440638,0.0,0.0,0.05587938500027557,0.1004348992098791,0.07095178830891011,0.0,0.05439823226332295,0.0453867797990657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18161085818535125,0.047636759172984766,0.05644390411888511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052862175863139065,0.17793630514167574,0.049027283152796516,0.050963734623665394,0.1055688858111857,0.1119370096262244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19728755707233547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855638600722193,0.08827714424426412,0.0,0.0,0.08187269680651897,0.040478136271676304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522536189718763,0.1940842674104487,0.0,0.08769836429287071,0.08789205258840004,0.08340091804406953,0.0555549273182365,0.0,0.16887081827906572,0.0,0.0,0.0994418877370742,0.0,0.049888429443216746,0.0,0.0,0.0500255054754879,0.10008775836813072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05277890624006407,0.03650455881616258,0.0,0.03829953658847776,0.04796028843189069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04764847103967144,0.0,0.052108024658025914,0.0,0.033649744231353584,0.1133021076282247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409876526788297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046943137484085004,0.055982263609067384,0.04755891748928854,0.0,0.05354003834536697,0.0,0.0,0.049920299773787424,0.05562865254429871,0.0528177067383994,0.049671730837567284,0.0,0.031812373811755036,0.0,0.04903157311981062,0.0,0.05625316520832113,0.0,0.04723640789561046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045207044546497835,0.05180442925127213,0.05609973596510673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124075137553502,0.0,0.11468813918063715,0.1964532845560759,0.1111767859591075,0.07029679018187852,0.052929132663766414,0.07931435323054283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580698991516333,0.07467371196638184,0.039913454567859545,0.0,0.0,0.0567885853493228,0.0576571051192484,0.09897228917933194,0.09545708634914382,0.0,0.1576925497519106,0.1737368985330405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551721902423072,0.10114416305502516,0.0,0.04850893623645808,0.0,0.0,0.042888820868993635,0.0,0.0,0.20502823303551215,0.03941644126130679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047868822004502605,0.0,0.0723036568780139,0.0,0.0,0.07055165259169434,0.0,0.0,0.06395662464451844
mentalhealth,superduperfella,2020/01/02,"MDD, ADHD, BPD, GAD - feeling hopeless and empty. Not sure where to turn anymore. As I (22F) said in the title, I’ve got quite the slew of diagnoses and they’re really all piling up right now. I am pretty happy with my life, or content at least. I have a great job, my own place, a college degree, pretty great friends, and my family is more cohesive than it has ever been. 

All that aside, I feel worthless, empty, unimportant, hopeless, aimless, just ultimately like my life is going nowhere. I don’t know what to do. I’ve worked so hard all my life and I can feel myself starting to get to a point where working hard doesn’t really seem to matter anymore and I just want to disappear. I’ve had multiple suicide attempts previously and I used to self-harm and I relapsed today. I don’t want to feel like this anymore. 

If anybody has any advice or has gone through something similar, let me know. 

I’m pretty desperate.",3.1048033707865166,5.224233567415733,4.459985955056183,82.90155196629215,75.68539325842697,7.1466292134831475,27.417134831460675,8.07648339933343,1.959369662921348,717,29,133,12,16,237,115,178,0.15,0.6709999999999999,0.18,0.7826,1,0,1,0,0,3,32.0,0,0,0,4,7,10,0,0,5,0,15,4,0,1,5,30,33,12,1,3,6,0,6,2,1,0,4,1,0,0,4,8,0,0,7,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,5,7,17,7,16,27,6,15,0,3,0,0,2,8,0,4,6,81,21,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14627823419030908,0.11893886090989594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277063237552015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36212685396093397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329626058949106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353854887599793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009852978284314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474242811836202,0.0,0.24617181359118764,0.08695349197813693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940370008613724,0.0,0.06359126256916299,0.0,0.06917365553420253,0.0,0.09734690850608448,0.2683832728609526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295682855758293,0.218066146752964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078373391748523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337831797182025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12446222278589253,0.25791351788872785,0.11892797342810392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12716666657431344,0.0,0.11506037623405085,0.0,0.0,0.37148489758265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945928914956614,0.0,0.0,0.15594797859089654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039442697011106,0.11577919916956245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080511087936976,0.126975686750006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937024462001581,0.0,0.0,0.08615077261415745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13313687079961078,0.0,0.11471530545336513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537194868129674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323913822723672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512300902542472,0.0,0.0,0.1435817696290633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17722049290596442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dadosdoritos,2020/01/02,"Why cant I just kms? No matter what I do everyone hates me. my friends, my parents,girlfriend even ppl that I dont know so far the decade hasn't been off to a good start I was crying through the whole night of new years and tried to kms on day 1 and today I just drove everyone away from me. Why cant i just somehow magically die or make everything be and feel alright and have atleast one person care about me cuz where ever i go its ppl saying that they hate me",4.185151515151516,4.084266050505054,4.909646464646464,89.25113636363638,70.31313131313131,8.216161616161617,27.61111111111111,7.793537801064563,1.2991535353535353,365,11,85,4,6,118,73,99,0.132,0.73,0.138,-0.3425,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,9,6,2,0,3,1,9,0,0,2,1,15,18,7,1,0,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,2,0,1,3,2,14,4,9,14,1,14,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,2,7,56,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17543297407319616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903771604359144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20510711294123246,0.12042127838562446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937896228090228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21883867517668795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332918049941125,0.16890219143839205,0.0,0.3568448141253764,0.16781513675042292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441306543312776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442621945370868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611932813794883,0.1566149013775669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687018061433495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261841042096218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463945670378608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180338821884988,0.0,0.1752274548983733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652874763318533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16303985018816708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849010574945984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216392914003586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17699214513784867,0.0,0.0,0.12677307137681654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369780221998965,0.2084702374235886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024388006456944
mentalhealth,Weak_Maintenance,2020/01/02,"Sorry in advance for this, but does anyone else just feel inexplicable weakness and inability? I weigh close to 300 lbs with overweight not obese body comp, so I wouldn’t be weak logically, but I feel like if I punched someone my hands would just mush into their face and do nothing. 
Like if I had to defend myself I’d fail. Sometimes I challenge myself. I push myself and walls to see if it’s still hard. I do random movements to test my agility. I don’t know why, but I feel like there’s a fight just about to happen at all times and I’m too weak and small and pathetic to make it.
Anyone else?",3.5872635445362704,4.837579884297521,4.4764738292011055,86.91450872359967,72.4710743801653,6.700091827364558,25.014692378328746,6.937597516519254,0.8648119375573917,470,14,98,4,9,152,78,121,0.27899999999999997,0.662,0.057999999999999996,-0.9849,0,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,1,3,9,9,1,0,1,0,7,9,3,1,1,29,15,13,0,5,10,0,5,3,0,2,5,0,0,0,3,9,3,0,5,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,1,6,16,4,12,11,1,11,0,1,1,0,2,6,0,4,5,60,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27129946959687,0.3975530945654509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21549093950722806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697712380887323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32412522622099865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29427760712608125,0.2771881440830023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715540956246059,0.0,0.17378643781489456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10661765977419073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843366909494909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949691127323973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861488141549859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15459336603144486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437608432545645,0.0,0.1918715604038913,0.21716779590492868,0.0,0.0,0.1549291349458275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312331375741315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750553724955633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13781246470305414,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fruit2go10,2020/01/02,"I was diagnosed with boarder-line personality disorder yesterday After I was provoked by my boyfriends friend while intoxicated on New Years , it pretty much ruined everything and I did not even get to spend it with my boyfriend hardly. My best Friend was far from supportive even though my boyfriend understood my insane meltdown and yelling at him for not defending me from his friend. My boyfriend was texting my best Friend to talk to me because I had no one (when I went in the morning to pick up my bag from her house) and she said that she didn’t want to deal with me and “is not my fucking therapist” that really really stung considering I am the one person that is there for her during her hard times within 10 seconds. I know people at the party coined me as crazy, and that hurts too. They don’t know the lack of control I have over my brain and it’s hard to explain in words. When I got to my best friends house to get my bag the next morning , she simply left the door unlocked and did not even come down from her room to calmly have a discussion with me. I did not even yell or say anything to her on New Years that would affect her, as it was between me and my boyfriend and provoked by some guy there. She blantaly ignored me and I felt like a dog. I began getting suicidal thoughts and felt very alone, and ubered downtown to an emergency mental health hospital to finally receive an answer. I was tossed around from department to department for the past year now (in the city where I go to university), with no further guidance as to where I should go to seek a proper diagnosis. I finally got my answer yesterday. My boyfriend is extremely supportive and understanding and my bestfriend has yet to even text me . Thoughts on all of this and how to stop these feelings of feeling crazy over things I cannot control until I start DBT.",8.593459621136589,7.261107338983053,7.8978431372549025,75.52793120638087,61.7683615819209,11.380259222333002,38.055167829843796,10.328600350310266,3.712569823861748,1474,61,282,27,17,461,182,354,0.115,0.768,0.11800000000000001,0.618,0,1,0,0,1,0,24.0,0,0,1,5,17,16,1,0,13,0,22,5,1,7,1,57,49,25,1,4,6,0,7,1,5,2,3,4,2,3,12,22,0,4,13,0,2,7,10,4,0,3,21,11,55,12,56,26,7,49,0,2,0,1,28,20,1,2,23,208,67,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341581715290496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422359327982504,0.08029353072520043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054982622561303714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839652990980167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006885255586432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769583659633858,0.0,0.0,0.20232488656707792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298807852032463,0.0,0.09154700497570598,0.0,0.0,0.1033723890979444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978679182274435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106231668528903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121157909314556,0.0,0.17320454035002614,0.1976105399078383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484258907071037,0.0833847154342126,0.14137100566092994,0.0,0.10252088995692857,0.0,0.1442759041361473,0.0,0.0,0.08930818507201484,0.0,0.0,0.24239360268669866,0.0,0.0,0.09587409211035547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20814806531423205,0.09655664507201707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991386861085883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979981789305288,0.0,0.0,0.044065192096847484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089631751980116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06630441171176649,0.0,0.0,0.17422364839512589,0.09592443109675143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222382391606094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610225364240709,0.06253052479256263,0.15751127370507562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176172154850876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155636884349535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579701654985601,0.07172745087230299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06384116764302958,0.0,0.0,0.07540786471556819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986597453542692,0.20470662243470972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724960994004541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472446620126326,0.05992219074929115,0.0,0.08861707680188302,0.1432110410549542,0.05259399201741978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389717958457867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442111648780142,0.053199916537170634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361256237762195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640726250650379,0.0,0.0,0.17424973111498793
mentalhealth,TheShadowed3,2020/01/02,"I'm having really confusing feelings, j want to die yet I am afraid of death I've been having this problem for like a year and when I started taking ,y medication to help with my depperession nd anxiety because noe I'm afraid of death but I still always feel like I wanna die. Like what if my bearded dragon will be abandoned or neglected if I die or soemthing or if like my 3 cats go in a state of depperession if I died but I always feel like none of them would die. And also I wanna have a job related to animals and what of I actually able to get to and help animals or soemthing but I die and I with anymore, yet, still I feel like I dont do anything god in my life or something idk what to do it just like some really simple advise that might actaully help me ;-;",3.0169166666666705,4.176587525000002,5.023750000000003,82.79291666666668,73.75,8.333333333333334,27.083333333333336,8.841846274778883,1.9933958333333333,604,22,127,12,12,209,86,160,0.261,0.578,0.161,-0.9705,1,0,1,0,0,2,9.0,0,0,1,0,7,13,0,3,3,0,12,2,0,0,0,34,23,19,8,9,13,0,4,7,0,3,2,0,0,0,6,7,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,6,0,0,1,4,19,7,18,18,2,11,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,12,14,84,25,2,0.10858952498531776,0.0,0.10596771215837283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683900389844383,0.18071036742652247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307068939116788,0.0,0.10769162990964454,0.0,0.0,0.08935992663575468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619516653951828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6761926971585619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12726611455021045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196245063309345,0.2327291350401721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056733544937466435,0.0,0.061713929495741386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183558088861318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775834790934913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766999928709063,0.3713594978733704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10939252222527038,0.0,0.11519632574908288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039055100752661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13913046059859255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359752153788966,0.0,0.0,0.07686022469182573,0.0,0.1734394698481651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164580865583143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640489152939194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713888296389279,0.0,0.0,0.06992809384311896
mentalhealth,Chairatcc,2020/01/02,"To Something Better Been having this burning desire to write my first post since yesterday. Not entirely sure why. It might be that I’m using this newfound hope from New Years Eve to gain momentum moving forward. It also could be just a reminder for myself in dark days ahead. Or maybe it could serve as further inspiration to have hope within me and ourselves. Maybe even all of the above? Also, please feel free to share your own story or advices if you have similar experiences. I’m currently looking for ways to improve my outlook on life and practices for maintaining it, so every bit helps.

In retrospect, 2019 felt like a momentous year for me. To no surprise, it was full of meaningful memories, conversations, learning experiences, love, and of course a shit loads of pain and heartaches. Then again, it was the first time I finally sought professional and confronted my past. I realize these are just mere, initial steps in what seems like a life-long process, but to my surprise now, 2019 has also been very enlightening, possibly on a life-changing scale. 

Because despite all my problems. Despite broken family, feeling abandoned, self hating, victimizing myself, down to outright hating my parents for past abuses, and particularly how my relationships had been as of late, I still somehow managed to find hope and motivation to do the right thing. Even in dark moments, I'd encourage everyone to still welcome hope and embrace it whenever the opportunity arises. Because for someone one like me to finally have hope, I was able to have the courage to schedule a meeting with my parents, told them how I felt, and that I want things to be better. 

For someone like me, this is indeed a rare occurrence, but for the afflictions, personal traumas, and the past or fantasy we cling onto, I now sincerely believe that we ought to stop neglecting the one person largely ignored - YOU. Because no matter how tough life has been, YOU are the only person not worth any of the blame or hate. If there's anyone who can turn this around, it's YOU.

It took everything for me me to get to to the point, so please remember to be kind to yourself. Give yourself a pat on the back or a break once in awhile. We’ve gotten this far after all, so we NEED to feel more grateful in order to go forward. For me right now, even if the future feels uncertain, at least I’m sure it doesn’t feel so grim like before. Who knows whether or not this feeling will fade? But, Maybe. Just maybe. This might means we might be to able to turn our lives around just yet. Until that happens, though, every bit of hope helps, so don’t give up just yet. Lastly, remember to cherish your friends and loved ones, and thank them a lot (they deserve it) too. Most importantly, remember yourself, your role, and its vitalness in all of this.

I hope this is the year I will be kinder to myself and each other.",6.821443246019513,7.585110007532957,6.618787878787881,76.26882896764252,64.74387947269304,9.675535011128233,34.358329053244304,9.650220023710373,3.276040301318268,2278,97,402,43,33,717,274,531,0.11599999999999999,0.659,0.225,0.9966,3,0,1,0,1,0,79.0,5,7,3,8,34,48,6,1,24,0,37,6,1,5,6,101,78,43,0,17,21,2,8,5,1,6,3,0,0,4,32,22,0,4,21,1,2,6,7,15,0,5,13,9,42,34,70,51,13,70,0,3,1,2,39,25,1,24,44,286,74,4,0.12171336590181177,0.07210521793838458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05946844625084506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600120210677645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0413846312711957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0425524077076311,0.0,0.0,0.10835070038468504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04679503273039109,0.0,0.11129300722668843,0.0,0.05178455488472665,0.0685646418607785,0.0,0.10764558120838587,0.13287947207938713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643783012538659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717821876587487,0.0,0.0,0.03924752595556731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058579540808093,0.0,0.10254876022670313,0.058151168515444086,0.0546940625747049,0.1190590268157917,0.05737026458003122,0.0,0.18462580463223385,0.0,0.11686391847035026,0.13333104304311053,0.05562190570535785,0.10352932685877933,0.0,0.0,0.04701772228634074,0.0,0.03179510507488812,0.11675855121508945,0.03458625536380877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05381536375120422,0.0,0.0,0.1802501256480988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158190355634289,0.0,0.0,0.4231109235679141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337287041468517,0.03344524141006434,0.04960631903826215,0.06864898909915128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17193949965662345,0.14865750650010398,0.0,0.05373756599176696,0.0538562493634212,0.05110428653150456,0.0,0.0,0.05173817558928344,0.1098510647334587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445548708733129,0.06629076848148023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936779705271504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468102295675973,0.0,0.045124459295867,0.0,0.058775763615979276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481038119544379,0.1237141900526034,0.04628424969132496,0.06475580137494122,0.0,0.1351482890282215,0.0,0.1742837698615473,0.0,0.1594131246031294,0.0,0.13360472592238218,0.05752923600689501,0.06860676614250856,0.05828387992603424,0.0,0.0,0.058231626709460214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653373025114626,0.20681627544610892,0.10394254944961448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055401638541339664,0.06348679266717787,0.0,0.06246851051507185,0.05034127701259869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10312733995380388,0.046850447724131286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720045123275108,0.0508789119288352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471340694393882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056028657307980304,0.0,0.0,0.08086095202975872,0.0,0.05979138201300886,0.0,0.03548602122515358,0.0,0.0,0.058151168515444086,0.0676140139662177,0.0,0.1323891912283194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05256063463304475,0.0,0.05021313686192611,0.03589484834673047,0.048305202281002414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05491369071167828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756912566697232
mentalhealth,ChayanDas19,2020/01/02,"I don't know why I always prey upon cats This cat is in our mess for about a month now. We feed him and gave him comfortable sleeping place. I haven't been here since two weeks and today that I came back, the cat was extremely happy to see me, he almost made my t-shirt a mess with his body-hair, chewed all my fingers gently as he used to do, and licked me all over my hand and face. I don't know why but at a sudden change of my mind, as if I was possessed by something else, I started putting more pressure on his neck and head, the cat definitely sensed something tried to get out of my then tight grip. Finally it scratched my arm and got out, but just as it was about to leave my room I strangled it's neck with the door. I truly don't know why the hell I started doing this all of a sudden, but just as the cat started meowing loud in pain, I let it go. Understandably, now he is totally afraid of me and won't even let me sit beside it. I fucking hate myself. Another time, it was an year ago, I tortured 3 kittens who stayed at our mess. I just don't know what happens to me. I want to punish myself so bad, it's getting unbearable.",4.453657379964437,4.048019087136929,5.3227415530527535,87.56167012448134,69.74688796680498,8.379490219324245,28.0026674570243,7.7094869923839395,1.370697451096622,884,26,203,9,14,290,138,241,0.183,0.748,0.069,-0.9877,0,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,3,0,0,0,11,14,5,2,10,0,17,12,8,2,4,35,38,17,0,2,7,0,5,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,12,13,2,1,5,0,0,3,6,12,0,1,9,8,36,2,29,26,5,32,1,0,1,1,12,11,2,2,16,131,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849894793182672,0.0,0.13386086398028466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112321813850656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401747734709386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027914027460645,0.1116169276917767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15289391206412864,0.0,0.0,0.1414153491551216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167219792331236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829415102425688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464395272780344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358468648579575,0.13968420408791324,0.0,0.07597322829246772,0.0,0.1069158315602091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821247697692895,0.1423044779619744,0.0,0.13198098301923195,0.1371938920824937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938673683190772,0.0,0.0,0.14154745228088506,0.0,0.2733930075684731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649092131219067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13497834324366031,0.0,0.10670182483134334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224457748808828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13966678667235508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438497532538468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652537706104737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058119159712754,0.0,0.13377619633237803,0.0,0.0,0.2058262580385793,0.0,0.0,0.2838574424689026,0.14248472503663032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794968155329828,0.0,0.12671268169971345,0.0,0.0,0.0907597104320901,0.0,0.13058559801798428,0.13916523478473625,0.0,0.11545630054972067,0.0,0.0,0.07884772373545987,0.0,0.10722975539512264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.361875286896702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860853146284744
mentalhealth,StrictObject,2020/01/02,"How do I find the motivation to do things I find interesting? I want to play video games and play music. I have a violin just collecting dust in my closet and it's been there for at least a couple months now. But like, I just have no motivation anymore. 

This isn't relevant but about two and a half weeks ago I broke down at work. I had a massive panic attack because I couldn't find a parking spot; it took me like 10 minutes to find a parking spot and it drove me insane. And I cried for about 6-7 days straight after that. That's not normal for me, considering I haven't cried for about a year prior to that. idk. I was so suicidal and depressed and I needed to see my therapist but she was on holidays. I still need to see her and I have about 10 pages worth of stuff I need her to read. Hopefully she puts me on some anti-depressants, because I was so suicidal.

But I digress. But maybe it was important, idk. 

I just don't have the motivation to do anything. I just want to lay in bed all day on my phone or watching Youtube or something, and I know that's not healthy but it's all I want. Work is done, which should be stress free, but now I have to worry about finding a new job because I might not have enough hours for EI since it was a seasonal job. idk. 

idk. I'm stuck. I want to make music, I want to play music. I want to practice Mortal Kombat or Street Fighter 5, but I just can't find the motivation or energy to do it. And if I do, it'll only last for like, 10 minutes, then I'll be back browsing the net. 

I'm from Canada btw, idk if that's important but the sidebar says to disclose country so that's what I'll do. 

How do I find motivation or energy to like, do the stuff I actually want to do?",1.3662343658188547,3.1245751911357367,3.4508788718207017,89.80575337866198,79.6371191135734,6.8134307059514825,22.85075128011416,7.793537801064563,0.9607425669436752,1328,43,300,22,33,452,159,361,0.163,0.6559999999999999,0.18100000000000002,-0.7698,2,0,1,0,1,0,42.0,0,0,0,7,20,15,1,2,15,0,34,0,0,8,2,68,54,32,3,16,24,0,0,4,0,3,0,1,2,0,20,10,0,0,13,7,2,3,9,5,0,2,11,4,41,11,39,37,6,30,0,2,3,0,7,10,0,10,21,201,61,10,0.0,0.0,0.08601110474911322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813004625169892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741036181773691,0.0,0.0,0.07253101773825242,0.0,0.0,0.10027101730173636,0.0,0.06777357260122999,0.0,0.1611864393544606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752430276366572,0.19363345446182856,0.113684931693222,0.0,0.15182825662247035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019696070090023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107131210872216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5639031604875497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754207207668617,0.0867993171231878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17492903000057994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048438976630922316,0.07184517818781189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17224136360882358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058833572901771124,0.0,0.08854763170916997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350171895670636,0.0,0.0,0.07035183564675736,0.0,0.0,0.1960622082988848,0.0,0.08512534878586057,0.0,0.0,0.08635766189542463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703380195973745,0.0,0.1034123121933074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860419877943693,0.0,0.0,0.08816301049460999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009179671381845,0.0,0.0,0.1404709962749624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290962295312563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785383052354166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038804606088919,0.0,0.1009631085987994,0.0,0.2017964994031034,0.19281986829616432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233635667619276,0.0585557406762351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792584847203152,0.0,0.0,0.08609915101373335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36390731621395794,0.0,0.07069991670642625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12833271465776885,0.08950959412426804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056758728502671475
mentalhealth,Alya159,2020/01/02,"Hearing faint sounds Since yesterday I've started hearing faint sounds much like low whispers, rustling or chirping birds. Also  noises like  if someone is breathing or sighting around me but no one is there. And I generally feel a presence around me even when i'm alone. I have experienced many panic attacks and anxiety since two weeks ago due to my circumstances. Can anxiety make me hear sounds like that ? Should I worry about it?
Thankss",5.062692307692308,8.15161161538462,4.2483974358974415,81.96951923076925,73.87179487179488,6.976923076923077,32.82692307692308,8.07648339933343,2.8052,358,18,58,6,8,106,60,78,0.257,0.669,0.07400000000000001,-0.9494,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,1,1,1,0,5,3,1,1,0,12,12,8,0,2,4,0,1,3,0,1,2,7,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,0,10,7,3,4,11,1,9,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,3,9,33,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200013614536692,0.0,0.0,0.17759392623617393,0.0,0.13712659639559427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623521778247985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052939814145762,0.0,0.19507486572065036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325605172670113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670171146091239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.579786332445823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25131858972087395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445930880647755,0.17384632822773605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605210939169295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11619428856033925,0.0,0.0,0.2011861797937706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836878549765733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528819885524918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136920665875517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167503838842325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754499684056198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17413877433752867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mdevg,2020/01/02,"Paranoia escalating Hello all,
So in high school I was diagnosed with major depression and anxiety, but I was never formally diagnosed with schizophrenia as my psychiatrist did not feel I checked enough boxes to fit into the textbook definition as he felt I was still very much rooted in reality. 

With that background, the largest issue I have faced as a result of such is extreme paranoia which up until recently has been very manageable in my day to day. I currently live in a house with 1 roommate in a medium sized city and the other night I was awoken to the sound of the screen door being slammed very loudly at 2am and as I am a heavy sleeper and had taken full spectrum CBD oil that night to help me sleep, it was very weird that woke me up. So of course I freak myself out and stay up until 5am thinking I hear footsteps and voices. Of course no one got in but I have felt extremely unsafe and paranoid being in that house alone and my roommate is out of town for the weekend and I don’t know what to do because I’m fine mostly during the day but at night now I start shaking from how anxious I am being there. 

I’m currently in the process of getting a therapist to help manage this and other issues but I thought I’d pop by here to try and get some coping advice and strategies. Thank you all so much",9.309728317659351,6.51668284291188,9.125705329153607,71.89664576802507,61.56704980842912,11.789759665621734,38.66980146290491,9.800150414767053,3.6490965517241385,1046,39,199,15,11,342,151,261,0.10400000000000001,0.835,0.061,-0.8116,2,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,9,6,0,1,13,0,20,4,2,3,3,38,36,26,0,0,5,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,10,19,0,0,6,1,1,1,4,4,0,1,14,9,22,2,42,19,9,38,0,1,1,0,6,20,0,2,16,144,32,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120682163306726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279081106247021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447668649213817,0.13951914496359946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528407483174039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389406467814401,0.0,0.10636983370545333,0.250698538998513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760787141790206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062444996492422286,0.0,0.2371575412280476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904665599692322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877373484042458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919277519012582,0.0,0.16555806025822034,0.13048387393338712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850034028065297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578025299407091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787202861593014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905221379703073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815725063829983,0.0,0.0952503341664586,0.0,0.0,0.3476874018328072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368637503610278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194073715696445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498796432250125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358856823793887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741349572448552,0.13163390532723274,0.09862676317183612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370163502467802,0.0,0.14339229711022772,0.0,0.0791334150332585,0.0,0.0980447114858118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384797126480349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4075996845354162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bellmanhardlife,2020/01/02,"Helping depressed brother My brother is depressed. He has been going through some stuffs with work, exams and all which has been overwhelming. We have been kinda close and he never mentioned it. About a month ago, he suddenly left the house, saying the family dynamics is too overwhelming for him (controlling parents). I have tried to be a listening ear where he opened up about challenges at work (very crazy work schedule,  think investment banking, but he doesn't want to leave yet - gain experience). For NY, he chose not to go home but rather stay in his new apartment. I have been trying to reach him but he ignores my call. 

My question is this-what can I do to help? I love my brother and ultimately want to see him happy and fulfilled but I dont know how to help. Any advice would be appreciated",4.882762863534673,6.9142153020134245,4.933036912751677,81.81060682326623,70.47651006711409,7.919686800894855,29.866331096196863,8.59863814320734,2.368986129753915,636,26,115,11,12,198,100,149,0.067,0.713,0.22,0.9819,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,0,0,6,7,9,0,2,4,0,19,2,1,2,2,27,28,9,0,4,6,4,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,3,8,0,2,3,0,2,2,4,5,0,0,4,4,14,4,16,21,2,18,0,4,1,1,25,8,0,3,7,73,17,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528300813204482,0.13863717803677386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635584013604064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596995996207014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17541338698804562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694103236106136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18329701032377094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15298701998568107,0.14743788940033403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777689027732272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16648832408195266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144903660892857,0.0,0.15687970551069458,0.0,0.0,0.1804620170622133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595211892574912,0.0,0.0,0.16560264614168965,0.16992662421847374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411550848792669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248352001783343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062359438702915,0.1510499315084074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17366120442577582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752012848849763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12437377636544925,0.0,0.0,0.1246287661013095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16669920313375705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903801774811715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021336975837622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21236762609873314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290445315754977,0.1844949023445528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415782966383062,0.0,0.0,0.11110048167156393,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pumpkinn_pi,2020/01/02,"What do you do when you feel yourself slipping away? I have a whole host of mental disorders, and experience psychosis from time to time. I woke up today and just knew it was going to be one of those days. 

With each passing minute I feel myself getting farther away from reality and I need something to tether me here before I’m gone. 

I don’t know if any of this even makes sense. Any advice?",2.860659340659339,4.912565871794875,3.883919413919415,87.06346153846155,76.1794871794872,5.995604395604397,23.96336996336997,6.868970318607317,0.8378293040293037,310,10,61,3,7,100,59,78,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,1,0,13,17,5,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,4,2,9,0,12,12,2,12,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,43,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261509871557016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.314761047415885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4348727248913956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969301191627001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149253382219389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652391463831734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528575145742686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263832178380297,0.0,0.0,0.2340362024138253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091276723583523,0.0,0.13152715911815815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718802722106295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448150626216844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23322728514557825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17160261715232866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15682314442603396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17816633306353322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698977100039039,0.0,0.2193688411403084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583836382130956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AmericanMare,2020/01/02,"Definitely having an MDD episode I noticed last night that I am having more insomnia episodes, which for me I know is a sign of an episode. On New Years eve I had a breakdown because I've been holding it in for awhile (really planned to cry at home but THAT didn't happen). I took my sisters advice ""maybe it's because I'm getting off my period"" but having PMDD, I kinda know this isn't right. I feel like self harming, having suicidal thoughts, I don't want to talk to anyone, I feel I'm going to have another breakdown. Also feeling extremely aggitated, but I always am. These symptoms are also somewhat seperate from my PDD. 

I just wish people were understanding of my issues. I wish I could tell my parents or wear a sign that says ""Going through an episode, please be patient with me."" ""I am vulnerable, do not start an argument with me"" like uuugghh.",4.155790209790212,5.886377418181822,5.3078787878787885,79.61412587412589,71.78787878787878,7.986013986013986,32.086247086247084,8.617729084823388,2.7321841491841488,674,32,123,12,13,223,106,165,0.133,0.77,0.09699999999999999,-0.7844,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,7,0,19,3,1,0,0,24,37,6,1,4,6,2,3,2,0,0,2,1,1,1,8,2,0,1,7,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,6,4,22,2,16,29,2,15,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,3,9,82,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502628470329591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24594058061490545,0.12794945442945216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16124187772862186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751997627926964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874742565180579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227733087203753,0.0,0.1689097795275385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332531013402433,0.10985374472343984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033878992082939,0.0,0.17478274704717067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597883047525128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542444457796356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16049655168483226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16901659655886747,0.12534355947476314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15024909220128702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544832321589346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14851260011434644,0.0,0.14430328792417976,0.0,0.0,0.17506884307523093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707440496709229,0.0,0.0,0.10660516995255258,0.0,0.0,0.16879393829690026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850938151263808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13131924905420966,0.0,0.12228455007968687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041626806460876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883961951593997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682000743774086,0.0,0.0,0.15982652726821944,0.0,0.12359498058141638,0.13440227888191336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207667712202885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084479044625714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16008061376241542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069788175808242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3536571938754565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902322245187838
mentalhealth,mysrhgirl,2020/01/02,"Why does my anxiety manifest itself physically and towards myself? I have an anxiety disorder but I’m curious as to maybe different types of anxiety. Some people say that’s it’s like worrying about if your child will choke on food or things like what-if or social anxiety. My anxiety is like panic attacks, hitting myself in my sleep, nausea..physical stuff toward my own body..heart palpitations..it’s like it’s directed inward. Any thoughts?",4.706125,7.626299362499997,6.305000000000002,67.67000000000002,74.125,11.0,32.5,10.686352973137794,4.89425,359,18,54,14,8,122,61,80,0.27699999999999997,0.56,0.162,-0.8504,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,1,6,1,1,1,0,3,2,1,0,0,7,6,6,0,1,4,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,0,1,6,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,8,4,8,3,2,4,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,4,4,33,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332241636202668,0.0,0.6374041679103196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18957956971552192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17410564016866747,0.1909864084435348,0.0,0.14582971986841545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015044203010279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19747181973224512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3256518631093024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16741449693522018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19551872691088126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552872534372355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325205729349216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166762555770807,0.1698707460832228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19076546023172966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070967883340807,0.0,0.0,0.13229529964055556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15036867386893035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16923325200168182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mundane-Patience,2020/01/02,"NutsHell How to describe a mental health condition, it's Hell and sometimes Heaven but usually only briefly.

The new approach to MH could be see as a step in the right direction but it could also further deepen the divide in opinion. Everyone has a MH condition.. even psychiatrists. The DSM manual for psychiatry literally has a label for every querk you could think of. In fact most people probably have more than one, such as OCD or ADHD. Labels should denote something that's fact. Most of psychiatry is guess work and conjecture, it's a pseudo science and a huge cash cow. I'm not fully against medication. They serve a purpose especially in the short term and do help. But treating people with them long term is lazy and immoral. They ruin lives and in many cases cause or directly attribute to the end of those lives. 

So how is it Heaven? In my experience of bipolar you swing from extreme pleasure to extreme despair and I'd guess that's what Heaven and Hell would be like. When you're up or manic you love everyone, have no need for sleep and want to give to everyone. When you're down or depressed you hate yourself, can't get out of bed and want to give up.

Meds are great for blocking a psychotic episode but long term they do far more damage than good. Psychological intervention,  nutritional advice and peer support are what is needed to help people recover. The NICE guidelines state psychological support should be given to anyone who has had psychosis.. but this doesn't happen.

I may come across a bit harsh on psychiatry, I don't mean to disrespect them all, I have had some nice shrinks and fortunately have a nice one at the moment. Some though do not listen or show they care about the patients wellbeing. They lie compulsively and play down the risks of their drugs. The trouble is, if you get angry in a psych appointment that's easily seen as signs of emerging psychosis and thus a reason to up your meds. So you're stuck in a chemically induced fog. 

Something needs to change as this is damaging millions of people mostly without them realising it. It's not the best way and it's not humane.

#willoverpills",5.331414956011732,7.317830047979799,5.751026392961878,76.58282991202348,69.22727272727272,8.544020853698274,30.198435972629518,9.11188708381993,2.746148191593353,1713,69,295,34,31,549,219,396,0.15,0.6809999999999999,0.16899999999999998,0.8092,0,0,3,0,0,0,39.0,0,6,9,2,11,27,3,1,25,0,33,6,1,7,3,68,59,38,0,12,16,0,0,1,0,4,4,1,1,1,16,18,0,1,4,2,1,3,9,10,0,3,5,3,19,17,52,44,13,38,5,5,2,1,23,22,2,15,12,198,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198327817956607,0.09918462741255694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116951507170223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07097116151624076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651799023448727,0.0,0.11081171410951393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348601684215214,0.10426846170033864,0.10737354388550717,0.08743326445291265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431184778290457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874218031474667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770777840980888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989887513394759,0.0,0.0,0.06703979416999015,0.0,0.08551812949510725,0.2909628053075545,0.0,0.09928647845459826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060591237609832,0.19473610174124956,0.0,0.08513338619286062,0.0,0.1119041107289661,0.22362739122345973,0.0,0.08975611671809172,0.0,0.0,0.1002102385415257,0.0,0.10788975596232457,0.0,0.0,0.13606662386488766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04958777410157425,0.0,0.17925272298081465,0.17964861581944494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916077147913205,0.0,0.0,0.1029050711543416,0.0,0.11056325811832116,0.22548724176688026,0.10225057385365433,0.10228812914126227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257828965418813,0.0,0.09802933459114184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13755805663455078,0.07719532542248965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814692858754897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943416948865994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10435890704162756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668044727437944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088236048717716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10157330426681337,0.0,0.0,0.15627932103786568,0.100386097503486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303619992868443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503710300592147,0.09972323679732713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178791258800493,0.0,0.11973466211924465,0.08056597729356914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978423800646482,0.0,0.07389321044559156,0.0,0.0,0.0721026893707169,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,benignSpectare,2020/01/02,"I don't know how to function anymore. My mother just spent 10 minjtes screaming at me, that used to make cry. If she yelled at me two years ago when I was fifteen, I'm sure I would've. I'm now 17, and I probably only have 5 minutes to right this. But she constantly tells me I'm worthless. She just told me that my older sister is 10x better than me. Because she's engaged and also 23. I've stopped eating and yet I eat all the time. I  can't remember the last time I had an actual meal. Maybe Thanksgiving? I only had a bowl of mashed potatoes for Christmas dinner. I want to die. If I were dead no one would be able to yell at me. I'd make my girlfriend sad, but she'd get over it. I've tried before, with a letter opener, it was too dull. I've taking medication for this ""depression"" as my gf said I had, which didn't work, it made me suicidal, that's when I tried the letter opener. I made a joke about having anxiety when playing a game of pool because I almost knocked the 8 ball in, and my older brother screamed at me for telling people I have mental disorders that I don't. For all I know I could be faking. I joined this subreddit on impulse, and a lot of people are going through way worse things then I am. I'm sorry if this is fake, I guess, or stupid. I'm sorry for making a mountain out of a mole hill. There's too much and yet its so little and most likely my fault. With my family hating me and everything. My mother has also told me that being gay is like, mental trauma, which I mean. I didn't tell her I was bi, but I guess she decided to be homophobic that day. Sorry if this is all over the place, it's kind of difficult for me to think.of things in a list and put it down on paper, or text in this case.",1.8803196347031952,3.2731211643835643,3.767602739726029,89.72090182648405,77.08219178082193,6.620091324200914,22.303652968036534,7.3011,0.6704173515981737,1335,37,296,16,30,452,193,365,0.18600000000000005,0.773,0.040999999999999995,-0.9945,0,0,0,0,0,1,47.0,0,0,0,2,16,21,2,0,14,0,29,7,0,7,4,50,54,27,3,7,11,4,0,2,2,1,1,5,0,0,22,14,4,1,5,5,1,2,6,13,0,2,15,5,51,8,37,32,6,38,0,4,0,2,22,18,0,11,19,195,73,2,0.100571930543722,0.0,0.09814369653527784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891509482639568,0.0,0.10070826085426958,0.0,0.0,0.16085467304035353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693725158846812,0.0,0.09974033061547506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261543076908528,0.0,0.08557930542000995,0.0,0.0,0.08894769967467653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868252808487183,0.0,0.08029850292669218,0.0,0.11047354320824007,0.0648605750924761,0.0,0.08662245640781431,0.0,0.10437778564429967,0.0,0.1152641455465471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058203855124256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038756625718006,0.0,0.09481026544401837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052544682755739834,0.0,0.057157345809046085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22158264014723328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929395994083344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473018923564477,0.11054340568724458,0.0819795465498921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826873035845478,0.1007994955989736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550265886200177,0.0,0.19032718481603655,0.20139763377532144,0.0,0.10103802201740612,0.10955231603384888,0.0,0.10131563931907794,0.2027057024351168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393194090427778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815014295844639,0.15297897024651844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394478269040071,0.0,0.10507626177393244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843355129688267,0.0,0.0,0.1011025683500496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113928391979875,0.08588787916864606,0.09566693668743663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377461268954047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408263724749711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100093685299752,0.0,0.09478785431754948,0.0,0.07561757543769096,0.0,0.2637129005474707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336310435748959,0.06444243217584808,0.0,0.0,0.11728860295617095,0.0,0.0,0.19220157909985003,0.0,0.1365634782485656,0.0,0.09824416246814953,0.0,0.0,0.08686185706034834,0.0,0.0,0.05931993036355712,0.07982931722756832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321756324174132,0.0,0.10249138932445452,0.14288682781721115,0.0,0.0,0.06476502588989068
mentalhealth,VastReveries,2020/01/02,"Seeking app recommendations to track moods and symptomology related to psych meds. I can't find an app I like that let's me have daily check ins for moods and behavior (e.g. eating disorder behavior, etc.). This would be really helpful because I can't figure out if medications are helpful to me when I go to my appointments.",4.1370000000000005,6.915817366666667,6.0100000000000025,69.78500000000001,75.33333333333334,10.0,30.0,10.125756701596842,3.8955,262,12,44,9,6,90,46,60,0.045,0.8109999999999999,0.14400000000000002,0.7172,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,0,7,8,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,7,5,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,29,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18070823685903306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3397481113776929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033340807295388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33061109052515875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709425352380342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16847476895703958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39739752708564857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031319375244663,0.0,0.14482654336463313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292801339603369,0.2986340370499664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899082783721613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21058382752702126,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SoulfulYam,2020/01/02,I achieved nothing in 2019 & I will achieve nothing in 2020. This is what I want to say to anyone who asks me what my new year's resolutions are. My life is so stagnant and beyond my control I can't accomplish anything substantial. Every year for the past several years has been absolutely agonizing with no signs of stopping and I can feel my brain getting sicker and falling deeper into depression. I just want to be done with life right now.,5.546156862745097,6.944405752941176,6.038529411764706,77.00171568627455,67.94117647058823,8.960784313725489,34.166666666666664,9.2995712137729,3.219078431372549,359,17,64,7,6,116,65,85,0.19699999999999998,0.774,0.03,-0.9285,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,0,1,0,10,4,1,1,0,13,15,4,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,4,6,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,2,11,0,11,11,0,13,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,7,44,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21788416741405547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14060889216512198,0.0,0.1654823940797029,0.0,0.18799479730036944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22448627895152887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22554288422011096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17320109505083628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057879437093016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16942951462882305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167865640255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506278590792696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840758475084781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19421685994797053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3859082890958329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919660102507628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717323121566596,0.0,0.15991721455513658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22717783648291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681227414917198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372197077611526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884918716336319
mentalhealth,these10aces,2020/01/02,"The ten most important things I've learned about healing from childhood trauma  As the year has ended and the inevitable finish line of a decade is upon us, I decided to compile my thoughts on the changes and shifts of the state of my mental health. This is a top ten list about my most significant mental health and trauma recovery lessons. Quick background: ACE score of ten.

In no particular order:

**1:** No one is out to get me. - I swear this is the part about recovering from trauma and abuse that no one mentions. The world, as it turns out, is, in fact, not against me. I had been all but wrong for years. I thought and felt that because of what I came from and the people around me that I must have done something wrong in a former life. Why else would so many awful acts of violence and anger happen to me? Well, as I would discover in my late 20’s, the universe, despite my misgivings, is, in fact, always working in your favor. What I didn’t know is that the favor is all dependent on my actions. My choices and decisions led to an outcome that more often than not, was negative. So, what did I do? I shifted the way that I am in the world, and because of that, I realized that my decisions yielded specific ramifications. No one is out to get me except me. Taking ownership of my choices in life wholly erased the narrative that some unsightly underworldly people were after me. 

**2:** Fitness is a factor in healing trauma. - I didn’t get to 350 lbs overnight. That took some real herculean effort. And almost ten years after getting serious about my physical health, I still go hard at the gym, Crossfit, Muay Thai, and other various activities. Countless studies have correlated mental health to physical health. Walking for just 20 minutes a couple of times a day can change your life. Don’t believe me? Google it. It’s was difficult to be motivated to take care of my physical health because my mental health was so weak, but it was in doing so that I began to see real changes start to occur in my life. Through a series of tiny baby steps, I went from doing DDPYoga in my townhouse living room to fighting with some of the best martial artists in Thailand. Those steps took years. 

Putting fitness first as a cornerstone to creating a healthy life is without question, the best choice I have made in my journey of healing my body. The brain and body connection is severed when recovering from childhood trauma and abuse, and thus I had to get them reconnected. Pushing my physical limits not only helped to change my body, but it led me to be able to understand the depths of my mental capacity in a way I had not until lying on the ground gasping for air, knowing that I gave a workout my all. 

**3**: Asking for help will set you up for success. - It was embarrassing to admit that I was hurt as a child. I stuffed that shit down so deep that even James Cameron couldn’t find it in one of those fun little submarines. I hide my hurt, anger, and pain from myself and the world; until I couldn’t anymore. It rose from the depths, and when I did, I realized that I could no longer carry the burden of my past alone. I had to seek help. 

Help came in many forms. I had to open up to my then partner, my siblings, and ultimately the dozens of therapists that I worked my way through. Help to me meant saying that I couldn’t coop on my own anymore and that I needed a support system. Help meant that when I felt my lowest that I reached out to the people around me. Asking for help as a trauma survivor is like asking an astronaut to take off their helmet in outer space, it’s probably not going to happen. However, as I would discover, the only way I was going to heal from trauma was to be willing to do what felt impossible and ask for support.

**4**: Saying sorry is not a weakness. - Sorry was not a word that I heard very often growing up, and when I did, it felt halfhearted. When I would apologize, I never meant it. I thought for a long time that I was a sociopath because of my actions, regardless of how unjust or unkind, never made me feel any particular way. I had to learn how to feel sorrow and sadness for my actions and the impact of the people around me. Learning to let go of the idea that feeling sorry and genuinely meaning it was weak was an uphill battle for me. I had to let go of whatever ego held onto my manic desire to always be in the right, and in doing so, I have been able to form deeper connections with the people around me. I had a lot of apologizing to do for everything that happened from twelve to twenty-nine years old. I discovered that in being able to use the word and feel sorry for my actions that I became closer to me and further from the trauma that was imbued in my childhood. 

**5:** Not all of my friends are “friends.” - As I changed and stepped further into my healing journey, I noticed that many of the people that I had invested time stayed the same. I felt a disconnect between the person I was becoming and the people they were. I am not saying this is a good or bad thing; I am just saying that this is my reality. No rule says people will change along with you, and more often than not, they don’t. That’s why most relationships fail when one person seeks growth, and the other is set in their way. A growth mindset is critical in overcoming childhood trauma, but so are friends that want to grow with you. As I moved closer to becoming the person I am today, I simultaneously moved further from the people that wanted me to be the same. 

Friends should want to support you, raise you up, and help you grow, but the sad truth is that they don’t have to, and it isn’t their job. It’s your job to do that for yourself. It’s your job to build a community of support around you. And it’s your job to step away from those that do not have your best interest in mind. 

**6:** Self-care means doing the hard shit. - I am so incredibly lazy. I wish I had the words to convey that in a way that would make sense. I hate doing stuff. I dislike going to the gym, reading, writing, journaling, meditating, eating healthy, and staying in routine. I loathe the idea that I have to take care of myself, and I can’t stand the fact that every day I have to show up for myself. Life would be so much easier if I could stay in bed all day and not do anything; it would also be a disaster. The ability to force myself into a constant flow of doing things that I don’t want to do has been the most significant catalyst in understanding myself after childhood trauma. In a word, it is AGENCY that has led me down a path of success. It is in the knowledge that doing hard things and making difficult choices is why I am where I am today. 

Self-care is about being uncomfortable in owning who I am. I often wonder what my life would look like if I stayed on the path I was heading. I would surely be dead. I can’t imagine a possible positive outcome of drinking and smoking and fucking myself to death. It would have been Leaving Los Vegas without the Oscars. 

**7:** When the going gets tough...Cry. - This one is a real doozy. If there were an order for this list, crying would be somewhere near the top. Without a doubt being able to step into fully owning my full range of emotions has set me up for a very bright outlook on the future that is ahead. Being able to tap into my feelings has not come easy and certainly not without spiral after spiral of getting trapped in some. When I first began to “feel,” I was terrified because most of my emotion capacities had been in the “off” more since I was around nine years old. I used to tell people that I was always even and level-headed, but the truth is that I was a wreck inside. 

Being able to step into my emotions fully took years of intensive therapy, writing, sharing, and getting uncomfortable. It is not only crying that falls into this lesson learned, but experiencing everything from dread and sorrow to love and lust has made me feel more human. In American Psycho, Patrick Bateman says, “And though I can hide my cold gaze, and you can shake my hand and feel flesh gripping yours, and maybe you can even sense our lifestyles are probably comparable, I simply am not there.” The opening monologue of the film seemed more like my life’s mantra until I figured out that accepting emotions is the very thing that makes me human. 

**8:** Reading is fundamental. - I didn’t go to college. Hell, I didn’t even graduate high school on time. Yet, I have a vigor for learning that is only superseded by my want and desire to teach. I have been an avid reader for the majority of my life, but typically only when it comes to topics that hold my interests. If you give me a book about the Industrial Revolution, it would likely sit on my bookshelf for the remainder of my life, but if you give me a book like The Body Keeps The Score, now you have my interest. From being an entrepreneur to a public speaker and now an author, I have had to educate myself the old-fashioned way through the written word. 

The amount of education that you can receive from a few bucks in late fees at the library or awesomely-random Goodwill finds will blow your minds. Currently and for the last couple of years, I have read about a book a week but typically no less than three a month. It is the words scribed on these countless pages that have helped me understand myself, the world, how to heal childhood trauma, and how to show up for myself. 

## These are my 10 favorite books of the last 10 years that have helped me heal trauma 

(In no particular order and not based on year released but when I read them): 

1. Life of Pi - Yann Martel - I don’t ever read fiction. This is one of two I’ve read as an adult. Life of Pi is so beautiful and inspiring.
2. Jay-Z Decoded - Jay-Z -My first real hero. If you can make it there, you can make it anywhere.
3. Jab, Jab, Jab Right Hook. - Gary Vaynerchuk - A real entrepreneur bible of sorts. 
4. Mindset - Carol Dweck - Everything you need to know about the capacity for change is in these pages
5. Radical Acceptance - Tara Brach - The way we talk to ourselves will either make us better or worse. One of my favorite books ever.
6. The Boy Who Was Raised as a Dog - Bruce Perry - The stories in this book will haunt you and make you want to change the world.
7. Can’t Hurt Me - David Goggins - READ THIS BOOK
8. Bossy Pants - Tina Fey - There is no such thing as an overnight success
9. On Writing - Stephen King - If you want to be a good writer, you have to be a good reader.
10. Think and Grow Rich - Napoleon Hill - Just read it!  


**9:** If you don’t stand for something, you will fall for anything. - I had to figure out what the hell my values were and not just in a figurative sense. I had lived so much life without meaning or purpose and without acknowledgment of the person that I wanted to be. I had no idea of the person that I was because I hadn’t dived deep enough into myself to make a declaration about what it meant to be me. MOST people have no idea of what their values are, and for the majority of my life, I was right beside them. Values are the baseline for the way I now live my life. It may have taken me thirty years to figure them out, but without doing so, I would not be where I am now.

Take time and think about what values hold true to the person that you are and the person that you want to be. It is in understanding myself in an authentic way that I was able to make healthy choices and create agency where needed amid difficult choices. 

These are my core values (in this particular order):

1. Honesty
2. Kindness
3. Leadership
4. Self-Actualization
5. Momentum  


**10:** The road is long. - I used to think there would be an end to this whole “trauma thing.” I would come home from a therapy session or massage or finish another world-changing book and think, “this is the last piece of the puzzle.” I don’t think this way anymore. I understand the scope of healing in such a way that I have acknowledged that this process simply will not end. I don’t know that it will always be so arduous, but there is no day in my future that I get to hang up the child abuse hat and get to wear the “I’m a normal guy now” hat. I have rationalized that in every way that I can and it has left me with the idea of there is no other choice than to put my boots on, step onto the road, and to continue the journey until there is no more. This is why I wrote my book Think Unbroken and why I believe that no matter what we must stay the path!

MichaelUnbroken",3.3206626973336952,5.230106992998358,4.3544749764079285,84.83604652836648,74.4159802306425,7.004513683402378,25.54258569120775,7.8217560729950675,1.4421989107659825,9721,334,1890,139,206,3158,727,2428,0.126,0.743,0.131,0.8792,7,2,3,0,5,1,344.0,5,32,11,24,82,95,10,4,156,1,238,50,11,25,19,364,371,142,2,48,61,0,18,5,5,28,34,9,3,15,145,103,2,6,73,25,4,53,65,48,1,19,86,32,263,47,331,227,48,307,2,8,3,3,110,134,5,39,94,1395,408,38,0.16256757584548368,0.08254971177007397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023255420624510574,0.02405299725146841,0.0,0.018572175952797983,0.07729671206881017,0.0,0.0,0.015793075179234537,0.024352325400292342,0.0,0.0,0.06909572229770919,0.0,0.0,0.038222646647334366,0.124045378997183,0.08684499337480421,0.0,0.021819655557740986,0.0,0.019391019339828484,0.08494258743233211,0.051298032924448886,0.0,0.052330853763012414,0.07311627481176086,0.020539687131629673,0.0,0.10318624487299834,0.0,0.025925596995552688,0.0,0.053123999505963485,0.047356708038698375,0.0,0.2211106365684199,0.060016102231702936,0.0,0.02509682804279829,0.0,0.03708485173387943,0.051393694453804914,0.07653122077756787,0.0599100785944806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02376615319238646,0.0,0.02275061917229497,0.0,0.02376388787567597,0.01940062134331297,0.10449522390209337,0.061708551251220725,0.02399653755723422,0.0,0.061356771791210685,0.042014765577600977,0.039134341180535215,0.0,0.06261653775090763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394177252181964,0.0,0.11149311915138226,0.0,0.04245251976080398,0.059262812985635925,0.0,0.0,0.07177103190395019,0.021470157755733143,0.12133549807144665,0.04455703773400169,0.10558959968485017,0.05843741556548461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02299535127498486,0.06161055875678451,0.0,0.06241226418491363,0.022928832096890374,0.04766892387549519,0.1728017311211829,0.0,0.0,0.15566517044542935,0.024537367065717467,0.02329550478899362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458512239078613,0.13108500381157842,0.0,0.0,0.09218470539324627,0.020642504420054227,0.0,0.02418415909578537,0.05105307895730184,0.05679183082259216,0.05239523042825574,0.02459079855935068,0.025232878117489317,0.04749610302635763,0.2460563282444013,0.056730218537618414,0.023276488433106063,0.061521491934694174,0.04110491111999407,0.01950226000285626,0.0,0.0,0.01974416278747196,0.020960512037496132,0.06592515899337338,0.13951943901613933,0.07063628825028838,0.023331568643444843,0.07589303503442815,0.0,0.0,0.1170213429645297,0.0,0.04689911679926408,0.0,0.018537126864960344,0.04936674445795478,0.034144535288984625,0.05166077040135094,0.035823467561482684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02275452970914232,0.0,0.02644060894153157,0.0731088531600399,0.0,0.12589713905695016,0.08831426214715657,0.024711908937988664,0.0,0.0,0.02514926322086311,0.02216987800702069,0.17710610959567855,0.14194773670456304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02618150221980932,0.0,0.0,0.050078669293424576,0.0,0.0,0.046692947197271635,0.026016127183497096,0.0,0.18584179307460533,0.13216963705991586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02493381960588156,0.0,0.05949935207909982,0.0,0.1108116525403229,0.0,0.023503866546326423,0.018506472893407504,0.021142202205511523,0.07268290126188047,0.02623644109780625,0.04767808012758591,0.01921108266662277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035757846348288866,0.0,0.10398919517460113,0.016438023844879177,0.12376814681931972,0.01854666800961455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026585854341617584,0.0,0.10541700488944104,0.021888288046590675,0.0,0.08730756089382957,0.01866652278775338,0.02029874667784401,0.0,0.053117197395437535,0.02696478363591717,0.10800267377898667,0.0892857757806651,0.022817402552503103,0.05531164124866233,0.0677103291495112,0.0,0.044027158106802085,0.0,0.0774079536005085,0.0,0.02526097715218929,0.022686414229768827,0.120884699791885,0.05587107923555633,0.06017408120335568,0.0,0.057486546654159414,0.12328273056126765,0.2580771496166929,0.01862884334546229,0.0,0.02088111060943991,0.021528824500515884,0.10477996530832824,0.025928698972664664,0.02670638418111344,0.15670934187757374,0.025185371619418053,0.03381460896742736,0.0,0.02366717833187181,0.2474643034050361,0.05078346397183907,0.0,0.1645100110612384
mentalhealth,smallthrowaway32,2020/01/02,"hyperfocus scaring me, lasting a LONG time i’m not a member of this sub, but i’m just needing a little bit of help i guess. it sounds kind of stupid but i just don’t understand what’s happening to me and i’m trying to find out but getting nowhere. i’m still a teenager and want to understand but i have no clue what’s happening to me.

i have this problem with hyperfocusing on something to the point where it’s all i think about, all i WANT to do is think about it and obsess over it, and consume media around it. usually this happens with fandoms, but it just doesn’t seem normal anymore and i’m scared. plus all the fandoms are kinda niche and nobody understands what’s happening to me while i’m into niche stuff.

like before i was interested in that 70s show and all i did was watch it, then i moved on to miraculous ladybug, then i moved on to thinking about the goofy movies for some reason and now i’m obsessed with the IT franchise (yes, the one with the clown.)

it seems so stupid but it’s not like a one day thing, i just constantly involve myself in these pieces of media and i’m just LITERALLY NOT DOING ANYTHING ELSE. like i watched it chapter 2 like 3 days ago and i’m having dreams about the characters, not even in events from the movie, just characters and nothing scary attached.

this seems like my worst one yet and i’m starting to really scare myself with how i don’t want to do anything else and can’t get any work done for days and sometimes a week on end. 

any help is appreciated.",2.135811403508772,4.373287098684212,3.344894736842104,89.12992982456144,79.32894736842105,6.421754385964912,23.949122807017545,7.554174236665415,1.1000499122807024,1194,42,247,18,30,386,149,304,0.11800000000000001,0.748,0.134,0.2947,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,18,16,2,5,14,1,17,0,0,2,4,64,48,26,0,6,16,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,22,23,0,0,11,2,1,2,9,9,0,3,4,3,20,7,39,44,8,35,0,0,2,0,3,14,0,6,24,163,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819226657390634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531381318914987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866777636246224,0.0,0.0,0.16374429961660475,0.08856757919800126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465903126980702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086177858139918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751381421550422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924892973125615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018132560252641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16622298206078212,0.0,0.08811899394108873,0.0,0.0,0.0657124931482754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093245398899799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395929059363823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959992938132004,0.0,0.3519162478272433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337268109383446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360397670766963,0.0,0.08109798228426787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430300022718883,0.09971555165133388,0.0,0.08804590305124271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114851718721433,0.0,0.0737708959566372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747950121576887,0.09546375441577856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20225187814197595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405061800525973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519890858310588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637361194322442,0.10229273596135606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988218411680901,0.0,0.0,0.2717170627483657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659259653212767,0.09839858290216616,0.0,0.07041984105379848,0.0,0.07945318887717097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389274371927458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609702334636418,0.19124835801957496,0.0,0.0,0.0580136719766877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754747376493478,0.0,0.0,0.3107191506295053,0.0,0.0,0.1095746568280426,0.0,0.1760461065297545,0.0,0.07980522475104175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243022066561815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sdchibi,2020/01/02,"I feel like I'm surrounded by death and I don't know how to cope I don't if I'm in the right place for this.

I have depression, anxiety, ADHD. 

It got worse after my younger brother died (suddenly from epileptic seizures) 2 years ago. I don't know if I'll ever really be at peace with that, but it's getting easier. The past 2 years have been a major mental health struggle but I felt I was getting back into an upswing.

Three days ago my aunt passed away from Alzheimer's, which was less of a shock but still made for a quiet holiday. 

This morning at work I learned that my coworker died of complications from surgery over the holiday break. He was the only person the office that I considered a friend outside of work. 

I just feel so awful right now. My aunt and my coworker's funeral are on the same day. All I can do is sit in this cubicle and cry. I feel like I'm cursed to be surrounded by death and sadness.

Thank you for listening to me.",2.3787503809814083,4.228965601036272,3.878061566595552,87.47964035355076,76.92746113989638,7.8572386467540385,25.860713197195977,8.671277953709913,1.8489630600426696,743,28,157,16,17,246,115,193,0.203,0.6759999999999999,0.121,-0.9552,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,2,7,8,0,1,11,1,15,1,0,2,2,24,30,11,5,2,6,3,4,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,9,6,0,0,7,2,0,1,3,4,0,1,7,6,19,4,24,21,4,29,0,2,0,0,8,13,0,2,15,98,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18489585007162385,0.0,0.2727546043886688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176935861502676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454561315406733,0.11829990426028478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16899521631538433,0.19843894926827424,0.0,0.1325093803754874,0.0,0.3193406484705479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916466361872046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23337108382645175,0.21981862038445188,0.14771856711989756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886287326813633,0.0,0.16075885267464046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230466001979501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16353362887418846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16910208737617252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15032509016807338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14557505278913302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15504297697237868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700862223538605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468656827141707,0.0,0.13433446727160386,0.1607388074321596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855920885332056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26277134411476544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12286351140238674,0.0,0.0,0.16083572612838062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164291397239887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240068993677482,0.0,0.15678463826132213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198146619400131
mentalhealth,mothicca,2020/01/02,"Too many medications. Help. Ahhh. Okay. I just found this subreddit. Idk. I’m losing my mind right now. I just need to know who else experienced this. 

I started going to a new psychiatrist about 7 months ago. 

To preface, I have been on and off medications since I was around 18. I was admitted into a mental hospital around 19/20, and since then it has just been a rollercoaster. 

Anyway, this psychiatrist seemed to have my best interest at heart for once. Before him, I was seeing one that would talk to me for 5 minutes and ended up putting me on a high dose of Abilify that wrecked my life for a long time. He actually sat me down and apologized to me for the fact that I had to live like that for so long, and started weaning me off, and eventually I was put on Effexor. The Effexor worked miracles it felt like, for a month or two I had so much energy and so much happiness. I really felt normal for the first time, then it just kinda stopped working. We upped the dosage and then my hair started falling out, bad. Eventually I was referred to a closer psychiatrist so I wasn’t making the 1.5 hour drive once a month. 

Since I have been to this brand new psychiatrist, I have been on about 6(?) different medications. I was on 4 at once at one point. 6 medications in 5(ish) months. I never want to discredit or disrespect trained professionals but holy fuck I am not okay. 

I am currently on 2, buspar and Zoloft. She just prescribed me Prozac on top of those but I cannot bring myself to take it. I cannot bring myself to keep taking the buspar and the Zoloft. I am exhausted. It feels like every single month I am experience new side effects, I am getting on something or getting off something, and I don’t feel like I’m being given a chance to truly see if any of these are working because if I report back and nothing has changed, her idea is to add something or take something away. It has heavily affected my mentality. I’m so emotionless and drained, I’m struggling to be present in my life and in my relationships. I am constantly feeling this intense paranoia and anxiety even though I am ON anti anxiety medications. I am so forgetful, too. I forget things within seconds. I forget important things. I forget tiny things. I am so so slow to process information now. I feel genuinely stupid. I used to be so on top of things, I used to be sharp and quick and now I can barely think. I don’t know what to do. Has this happened to anyone else?? I feel like I’m being ruined 

Fast forward to this past week, I made the (stupid) decision to cut all meds cold turkey. I am definitely suffering from the brain zaps and the haziness and the anxiety. But I am trying so hard to push through. I want to be done with medication. I don’t want to go back to that psychiatrist to have her help me wean off because I have this feeling it will be a lot of trouble to convince her to help me get off healthily and I just don’t have any energy anymore. I just want it to be done with 


Idk what I’m doing anymore. I’m not in the mindset to hurt myself or anything thankfully but I’m just so fed up with my entire life.


Can anyone else relate possibly? I need to know I’m not alone right now I guess 


Sorry for the bummer of a post",2.556870428422151,4.724127628526645,4.222517241379311,83.7283735632184,77.57366771159873,7.63891327063741,25.837095088819225,8.548686976883017,1.9293980355276896,2529,97,504,54,60,847,273,638,0.139,0.757,0.10400000000000001,-0.9712,2,1,4,0,0,2,75.0,1,0,0,9,36,24,4,1,24,2,59,19,3,6,3,97,116,46,0,10,22,0,11,5,0,2,14,0,0,0,30,29,1,2,20,0,0,10,11,12,0,5,22,15,74,12,85,84,6,89,0,4,2,1,16,41,1,11,44,352,104,5,0.0,0.0,0.05976419488615123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542880983132435,0.0,0.0,0.06342913086685546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08329448690828738,0.0,0.14055185590911387,0.0,0.12147291710720833,0.08564486037081903,0.1255010904541697,0.05039765379184368,0.10903825547646544,0.0,0.0,0.0575396809541967,0.0941839548017755,0.051135228199995664,0.07466615543565687,0.0,0.05211316129207028,0.0,0.06427060094349253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836728360461915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647868231062408,0.0,0.0,0.06618177242640473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06398575158933678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534541332054455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534816476987935,0.0,0.05424299422363787,0.0,0.0,0.04045033002357842,0.0,0.051599749132653285,0.0,0.0,0.059907266573399114,0.0,0.0,0.18579737446609987,0.13125572968338609,0.11760549542282428,0.0,0.0,0.052093143612617035,0.0,0.06714963257906982,0.0,0.05661803524038112,0.09599059658353842,0.0,0.06961145493188345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674659125173009,0.0,0.05415685695089549,0.06519416100182558,0.054861571322328835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257308144090573,0.12314939004524747,0.064706441798826,0.0,0.0,0.060311878561105474,0.0,0.0655617459976052,0.06913573202141578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05443546600826755,0.0,0.0,0.10097241912775268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297729250260424,0.149600834278906,0.0,0.054078565514486684,0.1083960040173952,0.0,0.06851509263271471,0.0,0.05206648769007784,0.0,0.05794947290063335,0.04088008318235544,0.06209064542677651,0.0,0.0,0.06802700887214001,0.3701744173312579,0.12343679250467113,0.0,0.061837828065665575,0.0,0.2444173242778071,0.0,0.09004109444617146,0.0908216062004446,0.04723426748662513,0.17744620125840976,0.0,0.0,0.06000499761612148,0.058764173848872274,0.0,0.0,0.1956649346213579,0.08299949093161851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05846323760435669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05789429612189515,0.06904212033241593,0.058653728743527686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313197508697613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03923374296024788,0.0,0.0,0.06575190984547577,0.0,0.10460213197998104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760525715506788,0.05575319767789196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15198217467232325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18859097615404735,0.0,0.06855636535137083,0.13004403003276596,0.0,0.0,0.05120177144738671,0.0,0.06402433228879469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381410220365594,0.04922468931231705,0.0,0.05638419528310139,0.0,0.0,0.16274813386877365,0.03924195044060313,0.06017079690374494,0.0,0.07142240584424478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041579880402427334,0.0,0.05982537319717403,0.0,0.0,0.10578833153409248,0.0,0.0,0.14449049726209234,0.0,0.049125326465721056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337565897702554,0.0,0.0,0.04350516908267362,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,puffaluppagus,2020/01/02,"Facing January after the holidays is... Like falling into a pit full of shit that smells and tastes like prime rib. the kicker: it's still shit.

You think?",3.0554022988505736,5.67161431034483,3.642068965517243,86.16816091954023,78.3103448275862,6.625287356321839,20.011494252873558,7.793537801064563,0.9367839080459768,121,3,22,2,3,38,26,29,0.235,0.561,0.203,-0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,1,4,2,0,3,0,1,5,4,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,2,3,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,4,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3918518658462245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8233153837390739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202678683486277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569676762451651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,so-unaware,2020/01/02,Does anyone else get that sudden low feeling in the middle of hanging out with friends? And then you become fake af because you try to hide it and act normal? I just want to enjoy myself without the wave of sadness.,4.74642857142857,6.025212214285716,5.041428571428573,83.85357142857143,69.71428571428571,5.6000000000000005,28.285714285714285,3.1291,0.9829428571428572,171,6,30,0,3,54,37,42,0.19399999999999998,0.631,0.174,-0.264,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,3,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,1,4,2,8,3,0,8,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,20,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410061724424953,0.35316231840135565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101118999392444,0.3806686664503204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30162916531600176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879334053975683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17427904751498138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26629659508463144,0.0,0.1800795064090237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.337710278007759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340130577133873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20329942479137186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33225632803894123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samsolmil,2020/01/02,"I have bipolar disorder. Is there any chance of someone ever loving me and me finding the job I’d love? I moved to a new city to start working after graduation, been six months. I have no friends or family here so being on my own, my symptoms are clear for my own self. I am moody, I cry everyday, somedays I have fantastic moods as if I’d own the universe, next day I’d hide under my blanket. Nobody knows about this thing because I have mastered the art of deceiving everyone into thinking that I am a chirpy and happy girl. My past relationships never worked out because either I got moody and lost the thrill or they got to know the reality and started maintaining a distance. I am starting therapy next Tuesday. I just want to know, is there any chance for me to get better? Can I ever lose the extra 80 pounds which have made me dysmorphic and lazy? Can I study my through a good entrance exam? Will I ever find love in my life? Is there any chance that my mood won’t change so drastically and I determine my way through any goal I set? Because I really wanna get over this. I wanna be a better person, I am tired of crying. My eyes hurt and my throat can’t take that much screaming. I am here praying in front of you guys to find me the motivation to fight my way through it.  Thank you. Lots of love",2.759085457271365,4.705784835249045,4.116878227552892,85.75833583208397,76.1264367816092,6.991237714476098,25.9072130601366,7.893859768569023,1.5285251041146086,1026,38,205,16,23,338,149,261,0.134,0.6729999999999999,0.193,0.9593,1,0,0,0,1,0,25.0,0,2,1,9,12,20,1,0,12,0,22,10,2,2,5,32,42,13,0,4,5,0,0,0,1,2,4,1,0,4,8,9,0,0,8,1,0,2,4,7,0,1,5,2,40,11,29,33,7,28,1,3,1,4,14,7,0,4,16,142,48,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767431217924076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860568362428282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17995916162421646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762601669648852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235102907677734,0.06561302180268544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660132343924898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27608533935041324,0.0,0.09721565359240786,0.0,0.0,0.09591015813269267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27896188788186804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860303961525697,0.0,0.10630850590985504,0.0,0.0,0.0853335646031345,0.16273940758716116,0.0,0.0,0.10073727292389127,0.0,0.10830269990226063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891334427400699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095992572105293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16773872750493804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186102731981611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381954153791014,0.11105977024952302,0.08649457412459598,0.3672924664634673,0.09626758403832718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120683114989886,0.10813209918725762,0.07478962441438385,0.0,0.0784671298486964,0.0982598358931129,0.2164004472304622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712106698331308,0.0,0.08883427736787601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517639347712706,0.0,0.0,0.10922925075752796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613561517661016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620284005292887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160334505773428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574542718025114,0.07649481397267116,0.0,0.0,0.0936672930081145,0.11634702916665753,0.0,0.06759064780950688,0.06519002801537724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116933628177458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06000810012443675,0.16151083225142504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481339185312634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,abes098,2020/01/02,"I feel like my mental state is deteriorating I have depression, social anxiety and ADHD I feel like it's just getting worse as the days pass, I feel like dying but at the same time I value my life to much, idk what to do anymore.",2.483297872340426,4.199707914893619,4.8095212765957465,81.50875,76.23404255319149,7.253191489361702,22.388297872340427,8.07648339933343,1.13023829787234,180,5,37,3,4,63,36,47,0.151,0.6779999999999999,0.171,0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,7,7,3,1,0,2,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,7,3,4,7,2,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754532354483554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753369752974589,0.0,0.2273042969981421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781470377443326,0.0,0.1974091767746308,0.0,0.2378728749112368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476704321659141,0.4912204641686308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974726874357025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618903713678727,0.3359258666959376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23097916813191294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684879902568488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336400066805457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364806029984336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335738517708848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leflamingmongoose,2020/01/02,"No reason to live I am incapable of just about anything, hate everyone and everything, and I'm sick and tired of people saying I should not have the right to take my own life. I have no reason to be here. I hate this planet, hate my own species, and hate the way people are forced to live in this shitty country. All I want is a damn shotgun so I can paint my room with my god damn brains. You should not be able to force someone to live a certain way, let alone at all. Everyone should have the choice to live or die. Fuck everyone who says otherwise",3.653035714285714,4.6602468035714315,4.19857142857143,89.89642857142859,72.03571428571428,7.742857142857144,24.714285714285715,8.07648339933343,1.1475857142857144,430,12,94,6,8,136,68,112,0.359,0.602,0.039,-0.9925,0,1,0,1,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,4,8,7,0,5,0,13,5,1,2,3,18,21,6,1,4,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,1,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,0,2,11,1,13,15,4,6,0,0,0,1,4,4,3,1,0,61,14,0,0.12969367749911853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13432353632245267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672684596428106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478103636339093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460156125310607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37178360025256535,0.1165603146396068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989971499185813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5121826238615729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262057225833712,0.09160647991534174,0.0,0.0,0.4580875733201675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798265320419481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666934018411577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075769195003267,0.0,0.20627523574069856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988903207311193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751350490202307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14906380357454868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649669123629638,0.2058896089100352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,everdisciplined,2020/01/02,"My weight gain is discouraging me from continuing my psych meds. I am feeling very upset at my weight gain. Everytime I go to the doctors office I have to get my weight checked and seeing the scale increase ia just depressing and discouraging with the doc asking ""are you not exercising enough?"" 

I am thinking of quitting my psych meds but I can't quit due to withdrawl effects it brings. 

I feel helpless what can I do to manage my weight. 

P.s. I believe in body positivity but i can't afford to keep buying new clothes. It's expensive.",2.256606334841628,5.100584117647064,3.666078431372547,82.75350678733031,85.27450980392156,6.275716440422323,26.473604826546005,7.61054688173877,1.8699161387631973,428,19,78,8,13,140,70,102,0.113,0.774,0.114,0.0267,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,5,1,5,0,1,3,0,9,7,1,1,0,14,18,4,0,0,4,0,6,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,4,3,4,1,3,3,3,5,0,0,0,7,17,0,10,18,2,8,0,4,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,49,20,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14016044249475998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16891510574241966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653383434960406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913092527829487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15345547269087892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549134931865798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15161404122140631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783300749491451,0.0,0.0852063224347418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13326099484989967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3330676686992081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14479933179617244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189292180170039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947150107146287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606643864812324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12370453768158188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7302772387627048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PotatoPortal123,2020/01/02,"Adjustment Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder I have been diagnosed with Adjustment Disorder about 6 months ago, and have been searching for info occasionally since because I want to help myself get better. The doctors are claiming that it 'all kicked off' after a sudden family death and a huge upheaval in my family life in the space of 4 days, which is true but that isn't when it all started. That was just the point I though 'shit, I need help'.

Anyway, out of the few bits and bobs I have read I'm finding some similarities between Adjustment Disorder and Borderline Personality Disorder. Such as the reckless behviour/impulsivity, chronic feelings of emptiness, and self destructiveness. I also know it has been said that a diagnosis of an Adjustment Disorder is often given as a placeholder when doctors/psychiatrists don't want to diagnose anything specific.

I wondered if anyone with a bit more experience around mental health disorders knows of any actual connections between the 2 disorders (such as in the DSMV-5) or whether I am just imagining and drawing lines between 2 unrelated things. But as I said above I have only read a few things and could be completely wrong. 

Thanks in advance!",9.52125199362041,10.26793081818182,9.495322966507178,58.00684409888359,59.0,13.47384370015949,42.29704944178629,12.745084868956482,6.174530781499205,987,52,143,34,12,324,129,209,0.165,0.7709999999999999,0.064,-0.9772,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,12,6,2,0,14,0,17,7,1,0,3,39,31,21,1,5,7,0,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,3,10,12,0,0,11,2,0,1,2,3,0,0,7,3,12,3,26,22,8,19,0,0,0,0,7,10,1,5,8,108,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.08318193012044776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07556010432110137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816638584415166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05796611334447368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05960177999646906,0.0,0.07014524539205473,0.07588165928426667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051961504171877566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538784048198141,0.18611997505143016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937250334778782,0.0,0.0,0.06805719261678479,0.0,0.0,0.05497273910989365,0.0,0.0,0.17303358258927148,0.0,0.0,0.7815392685397476,0.08724673738896382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833810623787094,0.16071334488671168,0.0,0.043099897993112785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790780276436775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04453437442737823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060611889897977,0.0,0.0,0.1142691313936228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369133394978106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602075228130936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590185702305039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803774342491667,0.0,0.0,0.06320436939528501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482885025820233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885653547388686,0.0,0.0,0.08057933857484154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17052610589207812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16216549250335666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889238953346462,0.0,0.08749762048737664,0.07051139709558979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060333300673720364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847752656705559,0.0,0.0,0.11325931792852288,0.0,0.08374785325684646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055350422790688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243912850066204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319654327002627,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fighterforger,2020/01/02,"I have a crush... Not good. For some reason the last few weeks I have had the ""butterflies in my stomach"" feeling a lot. Like having a crush in middle school again. It has happened with any random mildly attractive women and I don't know why.

I am in a loving and caring relationship with my girlfriend and we have two boys. There isn't anything wrong but now I just feel kinda dirty and gross. It is the worst with a coworker of mine. I haven't acted on anything but I don't like these feelings.

I feel like my brain is changing for the worse",1.5195565749235485,3.9218488990825726,2.6754357798165143,92.05945336391441,82.94495412844037,5.101223241590216,20.09250764525994,6.42735559955562,0.17171498470948032,426,12,87,4,12,136,69,109,0.221,0.6809999999999999,0.098,-0.9518,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,0,0,4,10,0,0,9,0,13,3,2,1,0,22,21,6,0,0,4,0,4,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,8,0,0,6,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,1,4,13,7,10,20,4,10,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,4,7,64,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548145976911138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32789434009841656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22240366024227384,0.0,0.0,0.2031256060687428,0.0,0.21075616632109634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029414262299103,0.1423280901343443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16710248587000814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761761266215147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094901655368774,0.16239691669679676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919973241412672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16937600600311453,0.179810501509032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20483894238422154,0.0,0.2138956624651648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20162875904634456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946162151382093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15980819831541224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17977173531339075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20302973503437008,0.0,0.2178238801801963,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Danyelle_Barnett,2020/01/02,"Mental health ""One of the happiest moments in life is when you find the courage to let go of what you can't change"".

It's hard to talk to people but we are here for you to listen to you. 

https://www.7cups.com/19150804",3.332857142857143,5.7407425238095255,2.833571428571432,93.44892857142858,76.14285714285714,6.104761904761905,20.02380952380953,7.1686216300943375,0.2344095238095241,174,4,36,2,4,51,33,42,0.0,0.8640000000000001,0.136,0.5924,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,3,6,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,5,1,9,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,2,26,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659642027917382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161876903049872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966086573464485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.309898992576843,0.0,0.0,0.3677236226108828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3537524556612401,0.2443513602204128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486314438513477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344214538896253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23983487712210785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780576870131761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luigi_discord,2020/01/02,"about to go to a blood test right arm scarred bad from sh, never been to therapy, no one knows, what do i do? what do i do if the person doing it finds out? what will happen to me? what arm do they use to take blood? will this affect me in the future if thy fin out? really worried someone help me please",-0.5564230769230747,1.5442297230769242,1.5572115384615408,98.36966346153848,90.23076923076924,4.480769230769232,14.278846153846152,5.985473137389443,-0.8898846153846156,232,4,55,2,8,77,45,65,0.128,0.7979999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.598,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,9,4,4,2,1,9,14,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,0,6,0,10,11,0,7,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,2,39,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418576210275627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26474795512386057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16462291729925396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561492154341206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19415589836194047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15919194352748456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234069929367339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19628405044667155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529237250646635,0.0,0.31796445603829177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855663907328225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24737175999433106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24543165164784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21779153127993806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3312564123775869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25017698265902016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941681935514339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Available_Newt,2020/01/02,"How to regain hope? Hi Everyone,

Last year was a pretty bad one for me, and now Christmas is over I have to face my life again.

I feel so anxious and down today. I don't have a lot of hope, and I don't feel like I know which way to go in life or what to do. I'm in my 30s.

Would be grateful for any words from you guys. Need to snap out of this!",-1.1813749999999992,0.2764856125000001,1.2900000000000027,103.625,86.625,4.5,15.0,5.148860815047168,-1.2964999999999995,259,4,73,1,8,88,57,80,0.098,0.754,0.147,0.6207,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,9,3,1,1,0,15,17,6,0,4,1,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,2,9,3,15,14,1,12,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,4,6,48,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579055210681927,0.0,0.0,0.26232249612610525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938792146652357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22187924074961027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348169113959497,0.16588536375091747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319659136076678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299167758029128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4612585383470088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12761230703010973,0.18927585954991344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32802269165534875,0.11344231084612945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19741008496624465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721750572414478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734628245423488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362332091235031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201006220481768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843113712069025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16494984597776308,0.0,0.0,0.1495306629516553
mentalhealth,mr-archer-88,2020/01/02,Was avoiding posting this I woke up with a massive panic attack and have a lot going on if anyone is willing to chat and listen,10.047692307692307,6.128331461538463,10.434615384615388,66.56038461538463,61.30769230769231,10.4,41.384615384615394,3.1291,3.3295076923076925,102,4,17,0,1,35,24,26,0.306,0.6940000000000001,0.0,-0.8316,0,1,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,7,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,1,1,0,4,4,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,0,16,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3089330081264084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5026375984762931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510982688167235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3756222287018375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5183842515261349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.423144431087012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlinksMinksPanic,2020/01/02,"Venting I guess.. Going to the doctor soon So I've got quite a lot going on for me right now. I fled my home city to escape my abusive ex and I've been jumping around trying to find some place cheap to live (ran away with literally nothing, not a lot of money and stuff) so that was... Fun. Finally settled on a temporary place that's kinda crappy but hey, it's a place and yes, I managed to register with a doctor so I'll be going to them as soon as I can.

Anyway, I've struggled with PTSD for a long time now and it's been coupled with my selective mutism. Whenever I get stressed I shut off my ability to speak (wtf kinda coping mechanism is that? Not helpful). Of course with the PTSD I get triggered A LOT so I hardly ever speak anymore and I just start crying or hiding. I can't communicate when I'm beginning to get stressed because it happens so suddenly. I feel extremely isolated because of this and I'm worried I won't be able to make friends or get a job that requires being around many people. 

Probably another separate issue but I'm unsure of.. 
I've been told by my previous councellor that my hallucinations are possibly linked to my PTSD and its to do with not being able to organise my thoughts so my brain makes them into things I can see and hear.. Which, again, seems to be a really bad coping mechanism if that's what that is. I'm definitely getting a second opinion because it's caused me to have some serious breakdowns where I can't even tell who in the room is real and who isn't. My family were worried I had some kind of psychosis or something but I moved before this was looked into.

Bit worried the doctor might just pie me off with antidepressants and a 6 session Councillor like previous times and it's super frustrating to explain all my issues and relive them with every new mental health service. It's gonna be a long road to getting well.. Any words of advice?",2.758234179613492,4.9249810265252,4.448522925350513,82.35398938992043,76.93103448275863,7.491595301250475,26.6865479348238,8.418075326091056,2.0666194619173943,1505,60,284,30,35,506,199,377,0.12300000000000001,0.807,0.07,-0.9566,1,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,3,3,21,12,1,3,16,1,26,5,1,4,2,62,57,28,0,1,12,1,2,1,1,3,4,3,2,0,22,24,0,1,6,0,2,7,7,6,1,1,12,7,33,6,45,36,8,41,0,0,2,0,15,18,0,16,17,191,55,8,0.1702279414171248,0.10084613735015964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317238710432867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05788041876424309,0.08924941951174523,0.0,0.0,0.08441018813671168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515389582806209,0.0,0.0,0.07996737726127916,0.0,0.07106661032871801,0.15565405963387588,0.0,0.07242572013282818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292241168860678,0.0,0.0,0.09501534019091036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743549363997016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417698969542812,0.09349370017919184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613532668238802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05621697492402965,0.07699045937267923,0.07171219125741941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08023787663462466,0.0,0.04303618097892293,0.0,0.0,0.0932381945732096,0.0777926272580352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575884263510218,0.0,0.2668112204737975,0.0,0.1451166930177021,0.0,0.06807341768483402,0.0,0.09376263456938692,0.0,0.07526600320437682,0.0,0.07624539966725806,0.0,0.0,0.09047217075449697,0.09592963088352027,0.0,0.05705010044044776,0.0,0.0853762523896713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17767374423183632,0.08446248262711817,0.0,0.0,0.08863310280227395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04158238681547933,0.0,0.07515719549589099,0.1506463713932351,0.07147429889390168,0.0,0.0,0.21708256257607167,0.0,0.0,0.11362847273755901,0.0862922071325321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577486345467239,0.09029247247252574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046268094800176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220360328905142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166915043134981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059007310440960976,0.0,0.2667779514156895,0.0,0.0,0.09595321336480664,0.0,0.0,0.09176725612218434,0.0,0.2984810310195315,0.0,0.0,0.09052918473429787,0.0,0.09687833248593117,0.05452618910368441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268686593027736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06782481491178828,0.07748456227589631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655248929438305,0.0,0.0,0.06024410654672351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19499553175313825,0.08897960240890282,0.0974351331222232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439336194940123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0565459401400459,0.0,0.0,0.06757098541981205,0.0992612815771677,0.0,0.0,0.08133004649111437,0.0,0.05778679908334215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652768144395297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25931210635500546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kimkardashiansmom,2020/01/02,"Need advice with ending obsession. Please help. Thank you. Throwaway account.
Quick back story: When I was 14 I went out with a man who was 20. I loved him extremely but he was regularly physically and emotionally abusive.

This relationship lasted until I myself was almost 20 (just over 10 years ago)

I eventually left him and fell into a deep depression. I went back to him a few times but then he went to prison and it gave me an opportunity to walk away for good. 

*Ever since, every single day, I think about him. Every single day. He's the first thing I think of when I wake up and he comes to mind throughout the day. Its become maddening.* I don't want him in my life but I need help to stop my brain bringing him up. He tried to pursue me a few years ago several times but I literally kept ignoring him so I know I don't actually want to return. 

I think part of the problem is that-
-I genuinely was in love with him
-he has a wife and family and I am single and childless so I compare myself
-he is highly physically attractive and a good provider (I know, eye roll)

Really I just want tips on how to re wire my brain and break the thoughts. Any tips like activities or ways to break the habit? Thanks",1.3124310344827563,3.849477783333338,3.272586206896552,86.34,85.75,6.643678160919541,19.942528735632184,7.873277556716777,1.0047658045977017,948,28,193,20,29,318,138,240,0.11800000000000001,0.73,0.152,0.8726,0,1,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,0,2,12,13,0,1,12,0,11,7,4,1,1,41,33,21,0,6,7,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,15,0,3,6,0,1,7,2,4,0,1,11,1,36,9,26,22,6,44,0,1,1,2,25,12,0,2,23,124,42,0,0.0,0.1354106068450881,0.11152696716503507,0.0,0.0,0.11167927405534783,0.20261586287800204,0.0,0.11444124582677268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771862002111254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073757643801592,0.17575825884813848,0.0,0.0,0.12622026690304775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551626708352711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844754935435017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22111567479151487,0.0,0.09843464422675813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855673306656,0.10122376194035657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337852394621333,0.1925823158231814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773897595432932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721188963183143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19171589420496354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532074291430862,0.1207497770799244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561755071005462,0.0931586084388807,0.0,0.0,0.124172426471489,0.0,0.08072381117077937,0.05583452555252811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062957406334684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11539660884538527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16948372368921302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123760952815773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545206527203764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093565782859529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321474624102943,0.0,0.0,0.12270074254901367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291110169011134,0.0,0.09453882901314746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554848507341904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21043898635109146,0.0,0.0,0.07592675604820795,0.21969018707362648,0.0,0.09073057611564404,0.13328255030646613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775929126996767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022271065623829,0.09071516516647553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178337046840884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719329250591556
mentalhealth,KaoriSeavey,2020/01/02,"When I get bored of people, I leave them, and I can’t really bond with people This kind of concerns me, but at the same time I doesn’t. I’m just curious as to why I feel this way.
I had a friend and we were pretty close, and it was fun being around her. But one day I just got bored of her and I didn’t want to hang around with her since then. This has happened multiple times in my life. I’d also like to add that whenever this happened, it was because I found someone better and more interesting. And when I got bored of that person, I was bored of them since then. I’ve never wanted to be with them again. 

Also, I can’t really bond with people. People who I’m friends with will care about me, but I won’t care about them at all whatsoever. I might pretend like I care, but I don’t. I’m also very good at manipulating, acting, and lying.

This may be a part of how I block people out of my life.

But when I was younger, before my depression and pushing people away, I knew there was something wrong. I knew I should love my parents, but I didn’t. I think there was a time where I might’ve, but that was when I was very little. As I got a bit older (still a toddler at this time), I knew there was something wrong. I knew I should feel the warmth and love toward that person, but I didn’t. I just ignored this until about when I was eleven, when I started to realize that I didn’t love them, and accepted that. I’d also like to add that when I was younger, I would wonder and worry why I didn’t love my parents and wonder what was wrong with me, but never in a complex way, because I was young, so I didn’t really have that ability to think as well as I can now.",3.3626949131666493,3.6420894645892368,4.66930656484789,88.92211232910459,72.20113314447592,7.612218253479494,23.56312353738145,7.423996415210882,0.7273038305209996,1283,29,296,13,23,427,138,353,0.124,0.6409999999999999,0.235,0.9941,2,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,1,0,5,1,30,28,0,0,8,0,38,6,0,2,3,66,68,41,0,5,12,2,2,3,2,7,2,0,0,2,19,25,0,2,14,1,0,3,13,9,1,2,29,2,57,19,39,29,5,42,0,1,0,4,20,14,0,4,26,216,76,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664598788012373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830929853278413,0.0,0.0,0.0782630800798074,0.0,0.0,0.10155779811785616,0.0,0.07088215380721091,0.0,0.0,0.07367206941205029,0.09094201155845102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547896659326843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05372160053374396,0.0,0.071746156949078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423795286614735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913341364553062,0.12871472701402265,0.0,0.04352080525267506,0.0,0.0,0.06986807715572092,0.19986782818325685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473238072276614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867441181629821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882026589184218,0.0,0.0,0.11767448892169813,0.12208849836163785,0.08348847090625165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30072596293067483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17673624534745808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284921708814989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05644622717438558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18498955588213814,0.09020576865633807,0.0,0.3464983362337508,0.14546867165522084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474603390898543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600923145319164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13781322048636033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057980886971024,0.12825679969291476,0.0,0.0,0.058960159711098324,0.0,0.066523477412782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675053663455378,0.0,0.0,0.1942915697614045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13746242670666786,0.09826498140471136,0.13223930515159515,0.0,0.0,0.0748966924549887,0.0,0.15033056399968456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806705656442812,0.0,0.08459518051974474,0.0,0.05917392094184892,0.2732263781873514,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AthenaSardina,2020/01/02,My friend’s boyfriend told me I could go to good hospital and they’d give me drugs to make me feel good all the time Is that true? Do mental hospital give good drugs that make you feel good all the time? Then why do people hate mental hospitals so much?,3.275961538461541,4.65113698076923,3.3223076923076924,94.39769230769234,73.42307692307692,7.507692307692308,20.69230769230769,8.07648339933343,0.5199461538461541,201,4,46,3,4,61,35,52,0.06,0.698,0.242,0.8818,0,0,2,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,1,0,1,7,1,0,2,0,5,2,0,2,3,9,14,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,7,6,2,11,3,4,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,3,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13728290620046188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3987997797648593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17387961583295491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284313378795384,0.0,0.0,0.3298877760494963,0.09771946247284634,0.5768722530153588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16975862428312632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22954726392855954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34655724477334576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12639826819244734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920398415271966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20052329360007076,0.0,0.0,0.1642993978308302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515227891252106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WolfyIsAwesome,2020/01/02,"Medication So recently I've been diagnosed with misophonia and possibly tourettes. Whenever I hear my family make specific noises I get the urge to hurt myself, might even hit my head on the wall or bite /scratch myself along with other things/tics. 
I began seeking help a few months ago, and I finally got to go to some sort of therapy, after seeing a neurologist and a psychiatrist. I realized this is kind of shit though because I've only seen my therapist twice and he's already telling me I should take antipsychotics because hes so ""worried"" about me, even though I told him I'm doing fine. 
I've read that antipsychotics can cause serious brain damage along with other side effects, especially if you're young like me. I've yet to go and see a psychiatrist again, who will try to convince me that I should take them. The thing is, I don't see how these could help me. Have any of you tried taking this type of medication? Has it helped at all?
I wanted to post this in the misophonia subreddit, but I think they don't allow discussing medication.",6.1149576923076925,7.059594765,6.6350000000000025,74.89461538461539,66.35,10.753846153846156,31.884615384615394,10.727762888450028,3.5283576923076923,843,33,155,23,13,275,131,200,0.055999999999999994,0.898,0.046,-0.4415,0,0,0,0,0,2,22.0,0,1,2,1,10,8,1,0,8,0,15,7,3,5,1,28,34,13,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,4,4,1,0,0,11,10,0,0,3,1,0,2,2,4,0,1,5,6,26,4,20,23,3,17,0,2,4,0,14,5,1,5,10,100,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167621935505326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902523786380847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567267670128814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15359598534319574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14063855610643186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941911856833918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058707620442824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278699685412805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664210045683417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876544452996815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800808408831222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582085363800981,0.0,0.14319794489284915,0.0,0.1007600157320804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929477817130086,0.0,0.1419918588742991,0.0,0.2533310011483508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348672757900368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311917799409956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154887020809297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409454887116287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807434844280578,0.0,0.1336479239068238,0.0,0.0,0.10055833071450523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958156551929093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202676488116978,0.1206567715700602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12601697005630322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439289264668656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011761264511818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12931961312637644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.284170334902349,0.0,0.11011458768073598,0.0,0.1440723997097565,0.14627583067530775,0.08369742568934739,0.0807247408085364,0.2475550745954839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038203813823245,0.0,0.1710682079075731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743079651356371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279417272530564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Restorelife61,2020/01/02,Struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts. I have for all my life struggled with very severe depression and mostly that is due to the horrific physical and verbal child abuse I suffered throughout my childhood. I am 27 now and work as a paramedic and have had several really bad years lately. In 2018 my wife at the time left me and in the same week I also got fired from my job because I was struggling mentally and they said I was not needed anymore because of this. I really was ready to kill myself then but I got professional help and a new job. I was hopeful but still very depressed. I also was having really bad PTSD and night terrors from the things I have seen from work that made sleeping difficult. 2019 however was not any better for me. I was very lonely being completely alone at home since I have no biological family in my life and I would too get fired from that new job I got for getting hurt at work. This happened in November of last year and I honestly just feel like a absolute failure to my patients and to everyone that cared about me. I honestly don't think things are gonna work out for me since I can't seem to do anything right. I have failed as a medical professional and I have failed at life. I can't stop having bad nightmares and anxiety that keeps me from sleeping. I am thinking I am beyond help at this point. Sorry if this was long and annoying I figured this thread would be better place to vent about this since when I tried to at r/EMS they said I needed to stop whining and had my post removed by the mods with threats of being banned from the sub reddit.,6.033157894736843,6.377702242038223,6.338065705665437,79.05696781763328,66.38853503184714,9.795239691585653,31.81293999329534,9.682069395223575,2.8600471337579614,1280,48,245,25,19,412,160,314,0.289,0.623,0.08800000000000001,-0.9972,4,3,0,0,1,1,16.0,0,0,2,8,10,27,3,4,10,0,32,6,2,1,1,45,53,25,2,6,6,1,3,1,0,3,4,2,1,1,13,20,0,4,6,0,0,1,6,20,0,0,18,6,41,7,41,29,3,36,0,9,1,0,8,16,0,4,19,170,54,12,0.0,0.10023700279001467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761994321624125,0.0,0.1353089584115639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05753080732297844,0.0,0.06471866299384682,0.0,0.08390033060350864,0.0,0.0,0.06961847818382454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119120534997462,0.10314258149272408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14964340629464662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625519775930525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870134589701656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185972119439526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083879374313935,0.0,0.0,0.07975322085131895,0.0,0.04277623225049627,0.06043815843231209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839987249809765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029867143460723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481137871443155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341100863712412,0.0,0.0848605595995188,0.08402675193434307,0.0,0.0,0.09056590218027984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518569276684134,0.07519624461836003,0.09359721296976148,0.0,0.0,0.0689601790551365,0.09543232942924347,0.0,0.0919179977747587,0.0,0.17926615368032833,0.04133121934820515,0.0,0.0,0.07486821581087258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005043511667981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522546077120792,0.08525676295925592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545945166417338,0.0,0.16341414810214078,0.0,0.07939123968710925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838884979639246,0.0,0.07997421483502336,0.0,0.08102328238923094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889271162724038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625905140125696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224782004046783,0.16094768417893182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701653716358023,0.0,0.19114752769912696,0.0,0.2099456406335275,0.0,0.169321918341173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470261939751527,0.0,0.0,0.06756155920458921,0.14145854579682648,0.0,0.2653264335929909,0.0,0.09253851809185902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124087785316214,0.10841635136126088,0.0,0.0671628406602429,0.04933085996067276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05743775312712874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094112388936372,0.0,0.0,0.06786090644125492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24635882893343025,0.0,0.0,0.1201946295823749,0.0,0.0,0.1089590750336564
mentalhealth,Commander_Jacob,2020/01/02,"A question about hating yourself. I have a self-loathing habit. It's very instinctual. So would anyone happen to have advice for people hating themselves that isn't just ""to not do it?"" Because I get that a lot.",2.234250000000003,5.0491639250000055,3.1650000000000027,86.62000000000002,84.75,4.2,23.0,5.6839178017228535,0.5210999999999997,167,6,29,1,5,53,32,40,0.18,0.82,0.0,-0.765,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,9,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,8,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881396740957591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20617718574903005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17974759643216828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405533172120656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607490585378521,0.0,0.0,0.5822383211525363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506845561379274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044229796891437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303174394186553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3076095795633085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432953575025602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20946436921409345,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Castiel1989,2020/01/02,"Self help for anxiety and stopping negative thoughts. Can anyone point me towards any self help resources or share any of the methods they use for dealing with anxiety and negative thinking.

I can get quite anxious in general and about specific scenarios, now none of these scenarios have actually happened and when I think logically about them I can tell that they are nothing to be worried about but I can't shake the feeling that I get from them and then I end up dwelling on it.
I hate it, I know better than this but it still happens. This causes me to spiral into being paranoid and suspicious when I know I shouldn't.

It's like my thoughts on it conflict so much with my feelings on it. I'm worried that it will end up in me unintentionally ruining relationships and driving people away. 

I'm guess I'm looking for ways to manage it better.",5.230010351966873,6.901127813664598,5.913307453416149,76.56366718426503,69.0,8.844927536231882,35.155797101449274,9.2995712137729,3.433173498964804,682,35,120,14,12,222,96,161,0.17800000000000002,0.7090000000000001,0.114,-0.8783,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,4,3,8,8,1,2,2,0,10,0,0,2,0,29,29,14,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,14,10,0,2,9,0,0,2,5,4,0,0,2,3,19,4,25,23,2,22,0,1,1,0,12,11,0,2,9,90,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.1397028265840646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194706467344272,0.0,0.21903294650522573,0.16172926120673112,0.0,0.1001003117250517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13450287559900262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532255356458103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706403694558498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475909530005801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25359329711915113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477128786033264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495896519508252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577061097316681,0.0,0.2531905937781532,0.0,0.0,0.14134017115885925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19191332328883748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735321553927764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994040310560709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021775706413372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523855819370977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137365210126292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924863372398353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13533181241261533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522675382063871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153699513165233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2986927451942304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432720252947268,0.11968758570139633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251275388834958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18346139884147905,0.0,0.2273049875408061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364367129079724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11363318944236553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29077043812023706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gaydude_69,2020/01/02,"Weird dream 
Um idk if this is the right subreddit but imma post this here anyway.
So i just had a dream where i woke up crying.
Little information about me, im an introvert, socially anxious, 14 and idk if im depressed because i haven't gotten diagnosed but i do have symptoms of it.
Okay so what happened was, i woke up crying from a dream, and the weird thing is that i havent cried for many years (the last time i cried was probably when i was alot younger when me and my sister fought). My dream wasnt so sad, it was just my grandma telling me that she will kick me out our house then in the end she actually didnt mean it then my dream cut to me being alone, crying, then some piano played then i woke up also crying.I cried for quite a while before it stopped. Whenever i tried remembering my dream i really didnt find it sad but i kept on crying more the more i tried to remember it.
Anyone know what this could mean.",1.4499283549187112,3.543980314136125,2.9724111325434035,91.65670983742079,80.93717277486911,6.324717553044916,20.00027555800496,7.475848149327749,0.4882607329842927,724,19,159,11,19,237,105,191,0.175,0.6609999999999999,0.16399999999999998,-0.48700000000000004,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,0,1,12,9,2,0,10,1,17,2,0,0,0,23,27,19,0,3,7,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,14,4,0,2,7,7,0,0,5,7,1,0,14,0,26,2,13,10,4,22,0,3,0,0,8,9,0,4,12,107,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.09792423264396988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039292670008018,0.0,0.08024748904282086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336358889070468,0.0,0.07016498128761536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061170622221553235,0.0,0.0853879373745221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801189435403982,0.0,0.7715855556313965,0.0,0.0,0.0864287557216874,0.1018501300231682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887768999113341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171537365905738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887365532059494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157870075703258,0.0,0.0,0.21678403867815896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05514810710173052,0.08179622810022444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057409294626142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017361451847288,0.0,0.21861468154764685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610472273338433,0.0,0.10819107776107692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673142555547713,0.0,0.0,0.0642848812813723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273472623273469,0.08569582110639684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10229116697679952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389461597447384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10429899338809023,0.0,0.0,0.08770773310317895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666611235078612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851316410442041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625810201550095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462020166679501
mentalhealth,nexttimeiwont,2020/01/02,"Everything’s been numb for a while now Does anyone else get that feeling of just being numb?  Like yeah, things still hurt, but there feels like there’s a distance between me and that stuff that may have hurt me, and like things don’t matter.  It feels like nothing matters and everything is just happening for no reason at all.",8.806881720430106,7.614665709677421,7.12483870967742,80.79059139784948,61.25806451612904,10.20215053763441,33.56989247311828,8.841846274778883,2.553208602150538,262,8,50,3,3,77,44,62,0.192,0.598,0.21100000000000002,0.0999,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,2,1,6,2,0,1,1,14,11,5,0,0,3,0,3,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,3,2,4,5,8,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,7,35,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13785952179102529,0.20201469462794566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17253687765449988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16470267617416046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3543911011176477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29907150391772697,0.2817036468682088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300845985110754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743487786337556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4221297535838617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38529152846174336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18918125081118006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20271429566642504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574529908728979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257021195844387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619699513828087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-YoureJustADeadDude,2020/01/02,"Something scary happened I dreams that I had some sort of mental breakdown, with full om hallucinations, disassosiation and anxiety. Woke up and didn’t know who I was or where I was. I didn’t know if it had happened or not, and was terrified. My room looked weird and cartoony and I had this feeling of someone being in there with me. Could not listen to music or go on my phone (everything felt too much) do I just lies completely still (moving also felt like too much). Eventuellt I was able to ground myself a bit but shit that was terrifying.",3.912393162393165,6.062754769230772,4.4608974358974365,83.66188034188036,73.42307692307692,7.314529914529915,25.97863247863248,8.167268648758528,1.6204542735042742,432,15,83,7,9,137,72,104,0.156,0.778,0.066,-0.8916,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,7,3,1,0,1,0,13,1,1,0,0,23,24,11,0,2,8,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,5,7,0,0,5,1,0,2,4,2,0,0,13,5,12,1,9,9,5,10,0,0,1,0,3,7,1,6,2,63,17,0,0.2093529272771419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16741946030640106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16015441634285288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285591746538565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195025611439598,0.0,0.0,0.1671512772280628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18815291188201705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585513038296067,0.0,0.4020232822183563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898009311170207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3702602043850333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23010978755894965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227926544279142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758037320307323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109785103613586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22250903004689795,0.3077969800104904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21489777136758215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738405590599488,0.16117011147656696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16718951815572627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ibcicc,2020/01/02,"What do I do with my focus? For quite some time, maybe half a year, I’ve been having problems that made my productivity in school go very low. I’ve been having terrible problems with focus. I keep drifting away from whatever I’m reading and losing focus even during tests or stressful situations. When in that state, it takes me four hours to read three-four pages. Sometimes listening to white noise helps me a bit, but it’s still very hard. And that’s not the only thing. Pretty often, when I’m unfocused, I drift away from reality. I don’t know how to describe it. It’s like I’m half-dreaming, or dissociating. Everything around me is dimmed, and I usually don’t move and stare at one point. Sometimes it’s lighter and I can snap out myself, but sometimes it’s very deep, up to the point where my friend called my name and shook me. This only stopped when she snapped her fingers in front of me, and I got scared, as if someone woke me up while I was sleepwalking. 

I’d go to a medical professional, but I’m not 18 yet and my mom thinks mental illness is all about crazy people and schizophrenia. Medication is out of the question too. What do I do, is there any way I can make it easier for myself?",3.2808403361344536,5.133452924369749,4.222428571428573,85.98507142857143,74.37815126050421,7.281008403361344,25.345378151260505,8.07648339933343,1.4263606722689075,948,32,193,15,20,306,140,238,0.132,0.795,0.07200000000000001,-0.8572,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,2,13,10,0,3,6,0,17,4,1,3,1,36,32,21,0,3,8,1,2,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,14,14,0,2,3,2,0,7,4,8,0,3,6,5,25,2,26,26,4,36,0,2,2,0,9,16,0,6,12,122,39,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184296065946482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713810702937583,0.0,0.0,0.2261478769838696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313923680336505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228920577597905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949084967477509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816392158418156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298305861811408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367967503950469,0.0,0.09625586967896987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781105905349052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066888985348103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11852171464385015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10697369942142017,0.0,0.0,0.06614188632086157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587975298196761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464223717694676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387923995654932,0.08033537785839415,0.0,0.12090898276225455,0.0,0.0,0.24248239708942165,0.1212857288383774,0.0,0.0,0.14095390125270887,0.0,0.12791430670420176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155310541202458,0.1830650611245864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834363864351276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275416189370987,0.0,0.0,0.12244046382902875,0.0,0.2303197388754357,0.0,0.0,0.13482091672622473,0.12800834311378112,0.24076758938449064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049257260834664,0.12180186589788268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527982047670345,0.0,0.0,0.10197320318556226,0.0,0.3570913194864345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611264450072787,0.10061901385808153,0.13786192269139685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904891440129756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995600676602584,0.07711620601366365,0.0,0.0,0.07017776768528561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254987228119802,0.2979070968047462,0.0,0.09552920126373632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750224363624962
mentalhealth,jhovudu1,2020/01/02,"For all of you in therapy, how do you afford it? Therapy in my area costs a minimum of $150 and averages $200-$250. Usually for 45-50 minutes.  How do you do it?",-0.5027142857142834,1.4812689428571453,3.668214285714289,84.34803571428574,88.14285714285714,9.214285714285714,28.75,9.516144504307137,3.3302857142857145,123,7,28,5,4,47,24,35,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,1,4,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,6,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,20,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9009821680486038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4338561199965234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Couponschevette,2020/01/02,"Me and my anger and self discipline I’ve been raised in a strict home and always been told growing up to self discipline. Now at 19m when I do something wrong or get worked up I instantly turn to smacking/punching myself in the leg (I used to get spanked as a child)
But along with this I have recently seemed to redevelop a bad habit.
Children at a young age sometimes will head bang and hit their head into things when upset, it’s a behavior associated with anger but I personally struggled with this extremely badly in grades 1-7 as I was a trouble maker at school.
Even tonight as I was mad at myself I would smack myself in the forehead with my palm for saying something stupid in an argument I even took to hitting my head into my mini fridge leaving about 40 dents in metal as I just slammed back and forth in a fit of frustration to vent this internal pain and frustration with auditory and physical stimulation and now besides ice my forehead and crown of my head and be ashamed I’m lost

I just don’t know what to do at this point of toxic self discipline",10.848999999999995,6.9834555904761935,10.212261904761906,68.59982142857147,59.76190476190477,13.73809523809524,42.91666666666667,11.45678717892309,4.657238095238097,854,35,166,17,8,277,124,210,0.23800000000000002,0.741,0.02,-0.9941,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,3,10,15,6,3,10,0,11,9,8,3,0,32,23,19,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,6,7,18,0,3,2,0,0,2,1,15,0,0,7,1,22,0,38,11,0,29,0,1,0,0,9,18,0,2,9,110,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259200057054924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040480329749817,0.2259629008416225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787471031982122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14139185072634605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5554843781100911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357308696990209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436497803388789,0.0,0.0,0.14327787722509747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14771110103022475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14398352482410884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815087398210875,0.0,0.0,0.12791536827333874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360614711294178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760704055938672,0.0,0.13694488599920254,0.0,0.12318468814903955,0.4234857106502429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20834249471641847,0.13382890231302186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14145946305198295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898965393576554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929822560630738,0.15033871640309668,0.0,0.14718266160661592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686775981103795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851012728107328,0.0,0.0,0.09612310879964972,0.14794450246219346,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway99887734521,2020/01/02,"Issues in social situations I've been struggling with my sexuality for some time and last august I told one of my friends for the first time. Not a lot of people know but that's not really what this is about. A couple of months ago I made some new friends, one that I like more than the others. For whatever reason, whenever I am with them my stomach gets messed up. I feel like I can't eat anything and when I do I feel like I have to throw up. One time I almost did even though I barely ate. I really like those people and it fucks with me even more because I feel like this. At first I thought this was just a stomach illness or something but it has been going on for quite some time now. I really don't know what to do with this or how to feel better.",2.26470788704966,3.758419424050636,3.638607594936712,90.62289678675756,76.27848101265823,6.633690360272638,21.01460564751704,7.321109707123232,0.4317433300876337,591,14,132,7,13,194,89,158,0.078,0.7609999999999999,0.161,0.9274,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,4,8,11,1,1,5,0,12,6,2,3,0,29,25,10,0,0,7,0,4,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,12,7,2,0,8,0,0,2,4,3,0,5,8,4,20,8,21,17,6,20,0,0,0,1,5,5,1,7,18,97,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536241546129244,0.0,0.13031771905169434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709520605165007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933293218860456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509940930538427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399887972356387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13316704581530148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191421039657495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632134184193953,0.27891892495552784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22139625674298005,0.0,0.0,0.2010937003188695,0.12031354029598736,0.06799346098262612,0.0,0.07396230328773493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13583371165513838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14304451653885425,0.1060825340905608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3179023420171816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11064148443467854,0.0,0.12314285038963925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387754880113496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569128426323356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645613510169688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18044719047568847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384212983042428,0.0,0.0,0.2501155591801715,0.1338069375363776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628428061213006,0.0,0.13266267235065585,0.0,0.1001891354611444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605194970202095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278631723475478,0.10331766001162128,0.3035457683084399,0.0,0.0,0.12435559493312595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,izthepuzz,2020/01/02,7 cups You should know that there is free online counseling. Anyone that needs any kind of support should try 7 cups to be supported by a trained listener and meet people who are going through similar circumstances. [https://www.7cups.com/14482556](https://www.7cups.com/14482556),13.813076923076927,17.805419025641026,7.633846153846152,63.48615384615386,51.051282051282044,11.353846153846154,36.07692307692308,11.20814326018867,4.9209076923076935,238,9,28,6,3,60,35,39,0.0,0.805,0.195,0.7909999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,11,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,4,8,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22295433490430594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292455790378157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863289662033438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3414131222214626,0.1801819014752189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431021734686529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.227295101430464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7440975853655264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22259371357269048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,afriendsaid,2020/01/02,"What to do about double life? I am in my thirties and, long story short, due to very complicated relationship with my family I became extremely emotionally detached from every single person in it.

As soon as I turned 18 I ventured off to college and essentially ""ran away"" from my family. I still communicate with them and visit on holidays but by run away I mean I moved as far away as possible, rarely call and am extremely distant, cold and numb with them.

The problem is that whenever I am around them I instantly revert to this very immature, shy and childlike state. I am very quiet, soft spoken and walled off. This is in contrast with how I am when I am alone or with friends: my voice and demeanor are more age appropriate and I am more confident. To be clear, my demeanor with my family is not remotely normal or socially acceptable for a 30 something adult. It is noticeably odd. 

It is like living a double life, so much so that I am ashamed and embarrassed to have my friends see the way I act around my family and never want my family to see how different I am with my friends. I have kept the two separate. This makes dating and having close friends tricky because I don't want them meeting or seeing me with my family or even hear me talking to them on the phone.

I have tried for YEARS to look into this and ""fix it"" including going through two different therapists, but nothing has really worked. The therapy has only helped me understand the WHY but not the how to change.

The problem is that recently a close relative has gotten really sick, which has forced me to travel home more often, which makes me confront this issue again. Every time I travel back to see my family for this issue I revert back to that child like demeanor. Recently I became extremely embarrassed because I had to talk to this relative in the hospital while the nurses were around and they witnessed how I am with them.

On top of that every time I have to interact with or have to visit my family I become extremely extremely anxious as if I'm being forced to be around them and am being suffocated ( that is, I simply wanted to be away from them but this recent health issue has DRAGGED me back to them against my will as I simply can't cruelly ignore my relative who is sick.). Making matters worse part of the reason I am distant from my family is that it is full of stong personalities and manipulative bullies. As such I find it hard to speak up for myself.

But away from my family I feel free and confident so being with them causes angst as I can only think about wanting to get away from them and be alone so I can stop playing this child like role, which feels like I am being firced and held in some weird psychological prison.

I'm wondering if there is any way I can control this and learn to be somewhat normal around my family and also not so extremely anxious. My therapists have only been able to reassure me that I have good reason to be uneasy with my family but no help on how to actually go about not turning into a very weird embarrassing shy child to cope with being around them.",8.016582207207206,7.142937403716218,8.410729729729734,69.90904504504506,62.63175675675675,12.150090090090089,34.42927927927928,11.407655852321104,3.937183603603603,2461,87,444,63,30,818,247,592,0.14,0.747,0.113,-0.9132,2,2,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,13,3,31,24,1,4,15,0,59,6,0,13,2,101,89,55,0,10,17,0,4,4,4,1,6,4,1,6,29,44,0,5,11,4,1,10,8,11,0,2,7,14,77,14,93,70,11,66,0,0,5,0,40,33,0,11,24,349,106,3,0.0523655303847333,0.0,0.05110120383692834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846979372184164,0.0,0.04187669572952618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03561035635216992,0.0,0.0,0.11831628815824835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796985450773849,0.0,0.0,0.2951948373858452,0.12079758160371805,0.0,0.06384308256650548,0.05783361415916177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05347106134009943,0.0,0.0,0.053793824454337315,0.05539578772550642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587323950579056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942166763409167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05890417347512565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03458693894803709,0.0,0.13236065356783175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5923867396064366,0.0,0.05295517114132142,0.037409945369981185,0.0,0.0,0.047861146090075066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182991550772174,0.0,0.02735882831846092,0.0,0.05952107536353043,0.04392172242095305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04690922958632784,0.0,0.0,0.05566211007637538,0.05901975855441885,0.0,0.07019902239776055,0.0,0.05252689660025737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16396802618924672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397464548690727,0.10233261224348746,0.0,0.046239722710710036,0.04634184654334706,0.043973856927339856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486319447045074,0.0,0.0,0.05704141407024552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0556562715665957,0.038494690087928655,0.0,0.04038752526525451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026142030443838,0.05024613871031605,0.05961850341941735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947903661628576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05670676642298252,0.0,0.0,0.09144712259856733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05903426744326599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021348091767117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709339932099913,0.10768097340455124,0.15511393149080127,0.05622098238053205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16691419171423358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05338006368049486,0.0,0.04031354363851072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0418191802085612,0.04377992817487154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417885950442439,0.0,0.0,0.059884547696168224,0.12160083369915432,0.0,0.033553717443093635,0.0,0.0,0.06106952375955645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03555275776754256,0.1139173198360071,0.1023070283534435,0.05451436390012485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728281869175929,0.12354618626009935,0.08313064120918756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04725174623500295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0567881839382704,0.03812272979054266,0.0,0.053364949174462065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033721684696414664
mentalhealth,Heyheythrowaway128,2020/01/02,"I’m pretty much incapable of going to college at this point but I need to just get my degree, any advice? Maybe incapable isn’t the right word, but I’m definitely overwhelmed, not by my classes, but by just being around people rn. 

My social anxiety and depression are horrible, I’m always paranoid people notice me and are labeling me as the weird kid. I can barely concentrate in class. 

Yet I’m dojng all that I can to get out of this mindset. I’m meditating, exercising, seeing a therapist, trying to be as social as possible...

And it just isn’t enough. Should I drop out? I really just want to complete my degree. I’m 1 year away and I’d rather not go back to college for awhile.",2.161650793650793,4.5631805777777785,4.51589947089947,79.86083333333336,80.25925925925925,7.708994708994709,23.716931216931208,8.634040054169528,2.028026455026456,538,19,99,13,14,187,84,135,0.175,0.762,0.063,-0.9501,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,1,3,0,9,1,0,0,1,22,22,10,0,4,10,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,0,1,0,2,4,3,0,0,0,1,11,0,20,19,3,14,0,2,1,0,3,8,0,0,3,66,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871108697475492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15932570275850005,0.0,0.0,0.1302121518136185,0.0,0.14648075984088094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704567301222069,0.0,0.0,0.17990063808099602,0.14723537987044827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20076188142420545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16492041204916227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978487885318372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20007954265973416,0.0,0.2176436322259264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19236619364952268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407589516986714,0.14197910586267545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21799988580223412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654945845000817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181009359816748,0.2158635796426087,0.0,0.1948027800530404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266622400066655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16352185114487192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258381477848387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3903770513861582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223216479737926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000153792445732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129391587814971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12330607095519724
mentalhealth,oliamb1,2020/01/02,"My life is falling apart because of my mental health (M 21) This all started around a year and a half ago when my father passed away, he was diagnosed with a brain tumour and in under 3 weeks he had died. I was strong for a year but now I’ve fallen into depression (been diagnosed not just throwing the word around) and I’ve been an awful person to be around when I’m really bad. My girlfriend of 2 years left me because she can’t take it anymore. I’ve lost my two best friends in a year and a bit and I don’t know what to do. It’s so annoying that I’ve lost my girlfriend because it’s literally only because of me being ill and horrible to be around/ not leaving the house to see her. I didn’t fight for her because I want the best for her and I know that’s a life without me. I’m not sure what to do to help myself because if life carries on the way it’s been I can’t do it anymore. I’m in therapy and I’m on meds to help but nothing seems to be getting better. Just need help",1.1047565174618796,2.673809308411215,3.1942203639940985,92.22252090506642,79.74766355140187,6.000590260698477,23.87998032464339,6.8360192770164,0.678620560747663,768,27,176,8,19,261,110,214,0.191,0.6679999999999999,0.141,-0.9036,0,0,0,0,1,1,14.0,0,0,0,6,10,12,2,0,12,1,18,8,1,0,2,31,33,14,1,3,9,1,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,1,10,14,0,0,3,0,0,4,8,6,0,2,9,1,20,6,28,20,4,29,0,3,1,0,15,14,0,2,10,113,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536541413781907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21338590605285415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3830850117599995,0.0,0.0,0.1010773203344338,0.0,0.08982691171436462,0.3934878393113544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258024379670512,0.0951479976518805,0.1174522498319486,0.0,0.0,0.12009767365237987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09266066811211003,0.21838798942430931,0.111653672210927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831179892286932,0.0,0.05620742717065798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143551895521752,0.0,0.0,0.21633088922585933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241357854869146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824908056341,0.0,0.0,0.11391435656193084,0.1168887243747695,0.0,0.2279661495522603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23487806152344345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949992862553682,0.0,0.10841787797695188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977107650733845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103228330880719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818213554428032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939369081086868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06892011807066815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572934086687896,0.09793908704226617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07614746243070082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139525331199398,0.0,0.08088866734610675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123029989226875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509249113827017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06345495853838644,0.08539399799995466,0.08629620945694813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10370571161951622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27711846641716803
mentalhealth,kawaiibeans101,2020/01/02,"I feel as if I’m always doing everything to seek attention. I know it’s just may be I’m too self aware or then may be I’m too ignorant to accept the fact that in fact I’m not . It’s more like , I really don’t know how to put it in words but as I see I do stuff to seek attention and once somebody had told me and it just doesn’t go out my head . I’ve been thinking about visiting a doctor but then I feel like if I ever do it it’s mainly so that I can brag about my problems like people do when they say they have “depression” I just don’t get it . Sometimes I feel I’m not okay but then I feel like it’s all me making this shit up so that I can seek a bit more attention . Idk it’s just I’ve run this scenario of seeking help here in reddit for millions of times in my head and at the end I just feel I’m gonna use it to seek attention and have some pity on my self to make me feel.. uhh. Idk better maybe . It just is fucking up my mind , idk I know nothing is wrong with me but then idk what’s going on.",-0.7881594202898548,0.8988044956521791,1.8970652173913043,98.53052536231884,86.65217391304348,5.398550724637682,16.97463768115942,6.6274283507984215,-0.4145362318840582,774,17,201,9,24,268,110,230,0.16899999999999998,0.777,0.055,-0.9725,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,1,16,14,2,0,4,1,19,5,3,4,4,51,45,21,0,3,15,0,6,4,0,3,1,1,0,2,18,6,0,1,15,0,0,5,5,7,0,1,3,8,25,7,24,37,6,23,0,2,1,1,8,10,2,6,12,127,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431459814547985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150509472619915,0.14998788302250798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832874610296445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406184740565903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168155754832707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242718070311817,0.0,0.0,0.12347199354584325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4167932511286905,0.19629449361599627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700941037604846,0.07177753532632285,0.0,0.15615712923947572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819914964560837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208568348353964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265081676397073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684757769902562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18340994134009184,0.0,0.1380208198871262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13871880308474607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318237738221209,0.0,0.0,0.14630961007398985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524485444426767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314580541062179,0.0,0.13810899201851082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801178880669652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092533709041159,0.0,0.0,0.1094773609525231,0.0,0.2866432108143821,0.0,0.1410228307067206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13587641316114454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15727195499393545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803020038237495,0.0,0.0,0.08010978847466715,0.0,0.0,0.13127641951656385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11865577422252295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15020797446619255,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RichBluebird,2020/01/02,"How do you isolate yourself without insulting others? I don't mind working professionally, but I can't deal with anything non-professional or personal. How do you reject invitations without offending colleagues? I'm not really interested in anything (friendships, career, other people etc) but you can't just tell someone that. Life sucks. I just hold on because I have to.",6.547619047619048,9.753974158730163,7.235158730158732,61.891785714285724,69.31746031746032,9.279365079365078,39.07142857142857,9.725611199111238,5.019171428571429,304,18,39,8,6,100,47,63,0.18100000000000002,0.737,0.08199999999999999,-0.7509999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,3,0,1,4,5,3,0,0,0,6,1,0,2,0,13,8,5,0,0,8,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,0,0,7,1,6,8,1,2,0,1,0,0,7,2,1,1,0,31,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4354155843345413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16127143454588633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727465537300972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950508829731135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18686436678976787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267127058656332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341044800036496,0.2310008861367505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16948192853604852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22415820817980772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312343969150201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5100468338564617,0.0,0.1926005786365818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scorpionkillzu,2020/01/02,I think i need help Ive always had a thing for being around people. I would always hate it. I always feel paranoid and feel like everyone is staring at me. I would get anxious and I would have to fidget with my fingers or ear to feel any type of relief. I've never liked talking to people in person because it'll make me feel really nervous. But now it's gotten to the point where I don't wanna go outside because if I interact with people id have a nervous breakdown and id just shut down completely. A couple weeks ago Me and my mom went to Jimmie John's and I couldn't tell the cashier what I wanted. I'm pretty sure it was an anxiety attack but honestly I don't even know what's wrong with me anymore. I also have depression from things that had happened in my past and now it's hard for me to sleep at night.,4.078065539112053,4.390612662790701,5.463995771670189,83.73850951374206,70.62790697674419,7.882452431289643,27.264270613107826,7.686295010490155,1.506493023255814,646,20,133,7,11,218,104,172,0.149,0.77,0.081,-0.8485,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,7,11,2,2,6,0,16,3,3,1,2,31,32,11,0,8,5,1,6,2,0,4,0,1,0,1,10,10,0,0,6,0,0,2,4,6,0,0,5,8,21,5,20,21,0,18,0,1,1,0,6,9,0,2,9,88,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210125109931567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917117691201364,0.340774812120618,0.0,0.0,0.09283503498776592,0.0,0.10443377423274013,0.15422334786779346,0.1353864214582451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152749405021528,0.0,0.15530577755491246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16643682936430965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431336171519789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15105150100984888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758036411759445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016701926840144,0.0,0.0,0.13044614867616652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761048003603111,0.09752650473268826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713235711277524,0.0,0.07758474893141716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071996350489772,0.0,0.12229082817449895,0.13478052284220166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150327837151727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502519802897578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333888875480848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911249734142766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988498276478286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122431030215624,0.10528895818928573,0.0,0.0,0.1281102918076229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031923023847866,0.28392740651894005,0.11919982970700052,0.0,0.0,0.12905101419223627,0.0,0.0,0.13888506295344594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745514944887042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13661381566533393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286639849153198,0.0,0.0,0.10972576755536004,0.11932032467769088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18138930033312886,0.08747344457869767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08052021728338084,0.0,0.10950427982711748,0.0,0.0,0.12655098219115388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29092949921540384,0.149257969113718,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kikonyc,2020/01/02,I was talking to my best friend about my depression diagnosis He started with talking about how many people in the world have it worse than me and lot of people can’t even eat or have access to water blah blah blah the usual cliche. I immediately stopped talking and felt alone in the car he’s driving He didn’t continue with the subject like it was completely irrelevant and unimportant.,8.148013698630137,8.111026780821916,8.015171232876714,70.10303082191783,62.01369863013698,11.135616438356163,37.42808219178082,10.686352973137794,4.055578082191779,317,14,55,7,4,102,51,73,0.207,0.6759999999999999,0.11699999999999999,-0.552,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,4,0,6,2,0,1,0,10,8,5,0,0,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,1,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,4,1,5,3,10,4,2,9,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,2,5,35,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23046910772752865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23352658077014446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23331355046264154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19166072068057746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276989423640216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697586645775132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21365919115971632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719225000387174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10871462471692114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891830582643058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22560573437106854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085420583772706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750455748719056,0.0,0.0,0.1860411205116215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5365722375002308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450801873058287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22677229850187586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,floundering2020,2020/01/02,"I process out loud, so I don't know what to do Throwaway for obvious reasons. And I doubt this will even be seen. I just wanted to say it somehow and somewhere once.

I'm really suicidal right now.

I want to talk it out, because I process things out loud. The thing is that I'm afraid of mandatory psych lock up if I speak up. My ex has already threatened to take me to court to take away my kids because of past mental health (I have never and would never hurt them, it was more about only being present physically, but not mentally). I worry that if I talk, it'll ultimately end up in me losing my kids. This is a legitimate fear for me because my grandmother lost her MANY children because of extremely poor mental health (she spent most of my parent's childhood in a mental hospital).

Right now, I feel like Lando Calrissian when that sand beast is pulling him in a little at a time. Suicide feels (for the first time in my life) like an inevitability. I feel like I can spend the next x number of years holding it at bay, but I'll eventually lose the fight. The thought of fighting every day, all day, indefinitely is exhausting.

I have some chronic health issues I've been dealing with for a couple of years with no answers from any of my many doctors. I have a therapist and an appointment with a psychiatrist to hopefully get me balanced (I'm bipolar) on some medication. It's been a countdown to that appointment. I keep telling myself to hold it together until then. Ironically, the first appointment they had available was the day I scheduled my suicide (careful timing and circumstances to minimize impact and trauma). I've told myself that I can last a bit longer and see if there's any improvement, but that if there isn't that I don't have to exist just for the sake of existence.

Frankly, I don't know how much longer I can last. Every day is a struggle to the point of barely (if I'm lucky) functioning. I'm a drain on my family's resources and patience, and a leech on my friends' and family's emotions. I'm just putting everyone through a lot of shit for an ending that will probably be the same whether it's tomorrow or 10 years from now. Might as well get it over with and let the healing and moving on begin, right?

I'm paranoid of having my freedom taken from me by being open about this, so I don't think I'll log in again. Like I said at the beginning, I just wanted to put it down somewhere. I'm not really looking for anything. I have no questions. There are no answers. There is no advice to give. There's not anything anyone can do. I just really needed to say it somewhere.

Why does everyone say you're never alone? What a load of shit. You're always alone.

tl;dr Life sucks and then you die. I think I'll skip to the end, thanks.",4.218658088235294,5.553873255514708,5.136426470588237,82.46004411764707,71.0404411764706,8.30764705882353,29.225,8.769984970463412,2.2520082352941184,2177,85,426,39,40,711,255,544,0.146,0.7659999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.9898,1,2,0,0,3,2,67.0,0,1,2,5,23,25,5,4,30,0,40,13,2,2,5,76,80,31,4,11,18,2,4,4,1,5,11,7,0,3,26,21,0,3,12,0,3,4,15,15,1,2,12,14,51,10,70,58,9,67,0,4,3,0,26,27,3,17,40,282,77,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919655964684324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14667952518653493,0.07814268178588007,0.0,0.0589211653447951,0.0,0.0,0.0963090272828244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495133201502813,0.0,0.11654430429167065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653010191376041,0.0,0.0,0.17266508427800434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773082440795373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219744151728925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835200974387657,0.0,0.18267124446600785,0.07300394955087806,0.0,0.0,0.07349156236691386,0.0,0.0,0.07247897027006915,0.06196796238700801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965384555808318,0.18815495014712635,0.0,0.0,0.046770585694699315,0.0,0.11932414332476445,0.13532759150085846,0.0,0.0,0.13351029613997678,0.0796830634553125,0.10741385817188097,0.1011760571462786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204651154153746,0.0,0.0,0.05470909078273176,0.0,0.07399258004864655,0.06792921761697387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258091841998046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033218479883488,0.0,0.0,0.07580559312341154,0.0,0.0,0.07390921595766231,0.0,0.06294086170091871,0.0,0.0,0.07783272602659269,0.1154422834493566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724099554754197,0.10003306453856492,0.1383804509987749,0.07097211702315886,0.0,0.0,0.0594641534145744,0.15844078451230206,0.07729954315546761,0.06020173686868145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143584284779852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133552968000144,0.28544692111799064,0.07512022528906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752618328746509,0.05205488708478315,0.052506119396950615,0.16384348562213166,0.0,0.07530924866840093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541235211036718,0.0,0.05385563347267781,0.0,0.0,0.0786282241464922,0.0,0.06759796181564598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694012475114673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634719445914985,0.0,0.0,0.14237101623660708,0.07932552318890097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360917304884635,0.07280641692334595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18141890219806256,0.06735832342693805,0.16893737202291462,0.0,0.0,0.05642790851599114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537477558005638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402796264241883,0.0,0.2323701442321318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648345770146878,0.11383183021916934,0.061892713275185376,0.06519407470292038,0.0,0.08221806245441028,0.09408854683416618,0.09074680007997656,0.0,0.05621673112655744,0.12387294804934935,0.0,0.0,0.06766379575042923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530006270024072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366839353821445,0.0,0.06389671690312491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191291188198055,0.0,0.050302735170702204,0.0,0.0,0.1368016070661381
mentalhealth,cas47,2020/01/02,"Help! Suicidal friend I have this friend who I never really was close with who is in a group chat I’m in. They’ve just posted a message that has me really worried about them. 

Apparently they’ve made a plan for suicide and I think they’re doing it soon (or they did it immediately after sending the message, I’m not sure, and I’m terrified that I might already be too late)

Nobody has responded in the group chat, and they’re normally very vocal, so I’m worried nobody else has seen it. I sent them a PM assuring them that I’m here if they need me but they haven’t responded

I’ve taken mental health training, but most of it only is useful under the assumption that 1) the person has never gotten help, and 2) I am there with them in person. I would drive over to their house to check on them in person if not for the fact that I’m several states away right now. It’s also difficult because I hardly know this person and haven’t spoken to them in months. 

Any help is appreciated.",2.789574342299733,4.6001036180904515,4.510972509606859,83.5706148389004,75.63316582914572,7.4964232929352645,22.258646172036656,8.313332769828598,1.2652386047886492,776,21,155,14,17,262,110,199,0.113,0.804,0.08199999999999999,-0.6298,1,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,10,1,9,5,0,0,9,0,17,1,0,2,5,30,32,12,2,5,8,0,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,4,14,8,0,0,2,2,1,3,6,1,0,0,7,2,20,4,20,22,1,24,0,0,1,0,31,12,0,5,7,103,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15217523466294947,0.1102779682330462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377620841759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12956087044232753,0.0,0.0,0.08406209358830538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519711581651836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21308121343650016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353062819400873,0.0,0.0,0.14658043811367105,0.0,0.0,0.2772928508485282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591172022320391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578581305929775,0.0,0.15555634330127682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304835902141464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13896999441346164,0.14628929606767005,0.0,0.0,0.11006985356705447,0.0,0.0,0.10225053527553199,0.21271278216312514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511197130590732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487858202874503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4816331711586256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320693480512835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668356182532888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776519303467844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15578688384632586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016787617986734,0.0,0.1299683968110394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883602615208522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910066313288176,0.0,0.11378131067081285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800867334172757,0.0,0.09795965986635737,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ohheyitstaylor,2020/01/02,"(Serious) I can't stop my thoughts about suicide or dying. I feel sad when I think about it, but it would also solve everything. I haven't been suicidal in years, but a recent event has brought me right back to it. I'm not seeking attention, I just need some help. I'm reaching out here because I don't know what else to do. I've called suicide hotlines, & crisis hotlines, I've only ever been paired with people who have no experience or any idea what to say. I just want it all to end.",3.752157142857144,4.647915730000005,4.7314285714285695,86.58500000000002,71.7,7.7142857142857135,28.285714285714285,7.957251820313856,1.6481714285714286,383,14,81,5,7,125,70,100,0.179,0.677,0.14400000000000002,-0.7764,0,0,0,0,0,2,16.0,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,1,0,9,0,0,0,2,22,18,6,4,3,7,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,1,6,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,4,2,9,0,9,13,2,12,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,3,8,50,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742193909872586,0.0,0.19973950429552226,0.0,0.12536203475414265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175118490306748,0.0,0.1123759989420348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18823852768465696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913227047454634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539979604662556,0.0,0.1632764035036245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16675208731519678,0.0,0.0,0.1656788706997052,0.18032638444532947,0.0,0.0,0.093211198722326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356366499823936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20810491455370245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131209067766662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13669069557344718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402039245040168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278027467696565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820200644076268,0.0,0.0,0.15743102084379498,0.0,0.1465998449665376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15412204312461708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6049359010035129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812188147270455,0.0,0.14635063815058624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10873242282744383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309545618435005,0.0,0.0,0.1187131902605231
mentalhealth,maxipadsforeveryone,2020/01/02,"Is taking a year off from highschool bad? I’ve just been a mess this past year, well the past 3 but it’s gotten worse. I’m 16 and started homeschool this year and haven’t done any of the work, haven’t done much of anything. I just sleep a lot. The homeschool program I joined anyway turned out to be not great. My dad is looking into something like k-12 instead.

I’ve already messed up enough. I have no motivation for the future and never have, even when I was a kid. I can’t drive, don’t have a job, haven’t had a single friend since 6th grade, just not great. I used to stress over school but now I just feel nothing. Now i’m stressed over the little things like the sound of my dad yelling or being in crowds of people.

I’m so stupid I don’t even know what the difference between a GED and High School Diploma are. 

I took a career test an hour ago and a lot of my results involved animals and nature. Some of them you don’t even need college for (but the pay on those isn’t great.) Realistically I don’t see me ever moving out of my dads house. Suicide by 21 seems like the right choice for me. I don’t have friends or any interests to keep me going. 

In an ideal world I would have a bf/gf and live in a city. Maybe new york. Where you can walk places or just get a taxi/uber so I don’t have to learn how to drive. I would like friends, maybe even some online ones. My job would involve taking care of the environment in some way. Anyways none of that is realistic.",1.2993051031487504,3.295126123778502,2.3918794788273634,96.14067480998915,80.92182410423453,5.005385450597178,20.00532030401737,5.8886186174403665,-0.2566902497285559,1148,30,263,7,30,364,169,307,0.126,0.737,0.13699999999999998,0.3965,2,0,1,0,1,1,35.0,0,2,1,3,21,20,1,2,24,0,32,1,1,4,2,44,52,17,1,5,13,3,1,4,3,3,0,2,0,1,7,10,0,1,5,0,1,6,16,6,1,1,7,5,25,14,32,40,9,40,0,0,2,0,13,18,0,9,19,168,32,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765534070094735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091217509095499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344900052738707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137370161987742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256461340436871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008195655626961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033134891409756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20238680762986105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021743525564439,0.0,0.26124970812009896,0.08944689333749295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04999908717314105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291942754117229,0.0,0.051663186524283713,0.0,0.05619846695987835,0.0,0.0,0.32706226906721786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044771391455882,0.0,0.0,0.0973815334824169,0.11409969398664906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19625565910699372,0.08789328540553272,0.0,0.0,0.05434445777889702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19324032346389255,0.09910847053529166,0.08731702218485059,0.0,0.0830382626837993,0.0,0.0,0.16813651092516152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986859908088312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509881145937093,0.07269164933007012,0.07332176924463359,0.07626599453548692,0.09550348179845512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09488255878869167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700684755650578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18879331455381554,0.06855421627758107,0.0,0.1033134891409756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444701326472832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20015323804245974,0.0787983216944249,0.09002093809631002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179846482805415,0.0,0.09895613650458382,0.0,0.0,0.07612629094374883,0.0,0.0,0.06999111599546516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22654423252084194,0.0,0.0,0.10816383747529497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148698010891493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06569461615876232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986456584951294,0.0,0.10755818331340736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540465158035879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849009052364216,0.0,0.0,0.08890924168082014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719892561573876,0.0,0.1007719808380394,0.21073461053233036,0.0,0.0,0.1910355589177469
mentalhealth,_Dogfood__,2020/01/02,I might start wearing ducktape over my mouth. I feel misplaced and speak out of turn when I grow anxious. I know my family doesn't enjoy my company and I am still young so they cannot kick me out yet. I hate speaking even knowing I'll be ignored as well as being in public I grow anxious to even mutter a word around stranger faces. Everytime I do speak and know I am being purposely ignored it feels like a punch to my chest and it truly hurts... I hope there are no adverse effects to my health and if there are than I assume it is a worthy sacrifice to my cause I just want to stop feeling so alone...,1.3435856079404471,3.5735083709677435,2.78483870967742,92.08571960297769,82.2258064516129,5.428287841191069,23.248138957816376,6.67199483983844,0.6674920595533496,474,17,99,5,13,154,82,124,0.171,0.7040000000000001,0.126,-0.6935,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,12,9,1,0,3,0,12,5,4,2,0,26,23,11,0,3,2,0,3,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,8,0,3,8,0,0,2,3,5,1,0,0,6,20,4,14,19,0,13,1,1,0,0,5,5,0,4,7,70,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20324572204261315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4433912629684086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469543301090332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20159279957133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592296763378863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849978482312656,0.0,0.2976749090749156,0.140194077953068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937466248553214,0.0,0.20859421530568112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19491085295094665,0.0,0.0,0.2100792525697471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3235455373823075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587307650492152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20817989981167928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13889986309719454,0.0,0.1567177217745126,0.16406564090448295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134530465006904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574758727963187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764435574700858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anonymous342133,2020/01/02,"Not many things stimulate me I'm a 21 M.  I have been realizing in the past few or even several years there's not many things that stimulate me that much.  The only things that I can think of that stimulates me is completing one of my goals, sex, food, and well... that's pretty much it.  I do get some stimulation from talking politics with people but besides that I don't look forward to much. I wake up often wishing I just never woke up but at the same time I don't feel sad, I would say I feel empty in a way.

I have never had a girlfriend but I have had plenty of sex. When I think of having a girlfriend it doesn't stimulate me one bit.  I can talk pretty well with girls in the beginning stage, but I won't make any efforts to keep them. One of the reasons why I haven't tried a relationship is well, I don't relate with any of the girls i've talked to in society.  All of the chicks I've talked to who I've found attractive may go some where sexually, but I can't really relate with them on a personal level. 

My number one goal is to be happy but I only feel like I would be happy is if I'm getting constant sex with hot girls.  Once i've been doing that I just feel like I would be happier.  

I feel emotionless a lot of the time. I get happy sometimes but that's when I'm completing my goals or i'm getting sex with a hottie.  

I'm hoping someone else has had a similar experience to this and would like to hear it, thanks.",2.282428256070641,3.595549798013245,4.282400662251657,86.77218818984548,75.8543046357616,7.814790286975717,23.51048565121413,8.472884824447931,1.3172445916114786,1117,33,247,21,24,383,136,302,0.023,0.7709999999999999,0.20600000000000002,0.9954,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,2,4,11,13,0,0,17,0,33,6,1,7,3,54,60,14,0,7,14,0,6,3,2,6,0,2,0,5,16,8,1,1,10,0,0,2,11,1,3,4,7,9,32,12,30,44,10,24,0,1,1,4,17,11,0,9,14,168,48,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651271736821507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015530559222222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950580710722516,0.10052088896505604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770574435058432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06143841398961587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099078901401676,0.0,0.0,0.23516693197101424,0.13290610738480854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124793866579269,0.10199093365217797,0.0,0.0,0.1943951181138941,0.0,0.05286504935845512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2970625345455335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483958598016807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923892190418884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267988652710978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13633369098736833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781128399561758,0.0,0.0,0.07908173861186348,0.0,0.0,0.06209114914571715,0.188614074416161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051398109769712,0.0,0.14348453911985187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906258901975908,0.2521293191828963,0.14149083898867632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879751025556627,0.06448791618874396,0.08122092251081957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18926827267756824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959058778874821,0.09563940065313442,0.0,0.09986798761195548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397273340708453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508540672683173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881500699507421,0.0,0.09199853152266957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990617716807259,0.0,0.08563973471304884,0.0,0.0,0.1853938005976481,0.11920610761516252,0.0,0.0,0.10848068077158504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315404359652874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383444307554353,0.0,0.0,0.2509067437676709,0.0,0.08393550962344247,0.0,0.10696768031202186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26431315514424897,0.0,0.0,0.059901421976610025
mentalhealth,kimkathfranryck,2020/01/02,Trust I went through sexual abuse as a child and I find it so hard to trust men. All my relationships deteriorate because of trust/jealousy. Any tips of how I can cope?,1.677727272727271,4.310440333333337,3.360833333333337,85.66125000000002,85.06060606060606,6.936363636363637,23.40151515151515,8.07648339933343,1.4540969696969706,133,5,28,3,4,44,28,33,0.16399999999999998,0.65,0.18600000000000005,0.2017,0,0,0,0,1,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,4,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,2,5,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,16,5,0,0.0,0.4882973972411699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28025721734560954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25122585814511994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3766722098909518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3691805277564847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.442464993121147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3820413933804247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heeeellyeah,2020/01/02,"I just want to vent and someone to listen. It makes me not want to open up when professionals just ramble on and don't listen to me. I'm so sick of being rushed out the door and no one listening. I have had a lot of bad experiences with therapy, I have a session on the 10th and it's just stressing me out. I understand when someone in real life doesn't listen and just gives you cliche advice because they're not a therapist, but it would be nice if someone just shut up and listened.",4.989733333333334,5.002587040000002,6.0139999999999985,81.63033333333334,68.6,9.066666666666668,29.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.1427666666666663,384,13,80,6,6,128,64,100,0.086,0.851,0.063,-0.3006,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,1,5,0,8,2,0,1,0,26,19,11,0,4,9,0,0,0,0,1,2,5,1,0,3,10,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,2,0,1,1,5,8,1,14,15,1,12,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,2,2,59,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21461415036176745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833769683159045,0.1338808264044866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148345340585296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21068347036342192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15512701255377628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18671657484584464,0.0,0.0,0.14660080696546046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882298910719344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499803328820275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5582604180517058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515786899265441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511593241466735,0.2550005333805489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286364566516924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25907999505497703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15601467507388933,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nothing-to-loose,2020/01/02,"Emotional masochist? I’ve been reflecting on this for a bit and I’d love to hear some outside opinions. I’m going to talk to my therapist about this but I really like to know from other’s experiences.

Just a fair warning though, I’m discussing real heavy topics. Tread carefully.

My boyfriend broke up with me a while ago and as much as I know he would treat me like shit if we got back together, that’s one of the biggest reasons why I want to be with him. He ignored me a lot, and made me feel so small. And I loved it. 

Another ex did that to me. He yelled at me while I was having an anxiety attack and honestly, I just loved it so much. I like feeling like shit. 

I love being degraded. It’s not exactly a sexual thing at all, I’ve done my research into masochism. But I love self-depreciating, and I feel incredibly happy when I get it from other people. 

I don’t think it’s healthy though. I’ve been dealing with self-harm, depression and suicidal thoughts for the longest time. It’s bad, I can’t begin to express how deep in shit I’ve gotten myself. I can’t explain it all in this post or even give a TDLR. It’s just a long story of abuse and whatnot. But I started to really love feeling like this. I used to hate feeling down and would do anything to not feel like it, but now I almost seek anything that’ll make me feel that emotional pain. Like “Yeah, I can just end my life right now” with a grin on my face. This is really dark but I felt the need to share but I was thinking of self-harming and not really covering up so people can notice and treat me like shit for being such an emotionally fragile idiot. I HATE the idea of attention seeking so far like that, SH isn’t a joke and like I said, I’ve been dealing with it for a long time. But now instead of wanting to get out, I want it more. And I know it isn’t healthy– that’s why I’m reaching out here.

So my question is, is there any specific term for this?  Im HORRIBLE at explaining things so if you need anymore insight on the inner bird, just let me know and I’ll try to respond. And once again, I’m not a masochist, at least from what I feel. Thanks for reading. I’m really sorry it’s long but it’s starting to scare me and i hope the more details I get out, the more precise of advice or help you can give me.",1.566555174385364,3.411553358490565,3.3817700590813797,90.1258168953688,79.35639412997905,6.684372022107872,24.258099866590435,7.686295010490155,1.1332184486373165,1780,64,391,28,44,596,214,477,0.17600000000000002,0.597,0.22699999999999998,0.9707,0,0,0,0,1,1,52.0,1,2,0,0,26,41,8,1,20,1,27,13,5,5,4,93,82,42,1,10,21,1,10,10,0,3,2,3,0,0,31,26,0,1,24,2,0,1,9,15,0,1,13,13,49,26,53,62,12,43,0,2,0,6,29,22,4,10,29,249,80,2,0.0,0.0792015544845328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06532111711903574,0.059254927206408924,0.0,0.06693659217550234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045457558026505,0.07009383748262349,0.051136991037244936,0.0,0.06629324920543278,0.0,0.0,0.1100170902866564,0.0,0.0,0.07604695141208569,0.0,0.05140043176304695,0.05581360038052178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297849620789397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815393073173877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783053848639226,0.05757434383858965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06840664503580722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22557818775540098,0.05920569653469019,0.0,0.0,0.044151138748539286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538819428632904,0.0,0.0,0.2703946841928683,0.14326434245194047,0.06418262277436511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477279532316523,0.12824950842668786,0.03799011038221175,0.0,0.05346283597351095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115878773568472,0.0,0.13199313036828114,0.0,0.0,0.07534027665056846,0.0,0.0448054507302856,0.0,0.0,0.06639314012039825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075460973870426,0.0722051282432298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14694720773473655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835454257168164,0.04721529190069895,0.3265756886183694,0.0,0.0,0.17746976391921654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056830060986246024,0.3619866358120832,0.06325128168173698,0.04462021010913703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827897205402243,0.09913089298365864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610459024447279,0.0,0.07118878611254746,0.04529656541793325,0.0,0.07112883474216282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268517041259022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401997003152234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488279500016115,0.0,0.0668640685598261,0.07608535865001098,0.21411622946620296,0.06872879968511826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05708610090139145,0.06358583368838965,0.0,0.06692448644296882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092048042670562,0.0,0.27446574772743376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482860082870982,0.09462785610647426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311865158143385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05372826591068657,0.0,0.06154279650420313,0.0,0.07761333387518689,0.08881899647441255,0.08566440855520614,0.1313516701178403,0.05306824062798221,0.07795685593530723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04538403191581268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05773346349480544,0.0,0.0,0.11828247115806335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206361978009496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949709312793321,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thissbitchemptyy,2020/01/02,"I keep losing reality. 
I’m 18 (f) and was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety when I was 12. I have been on at least 5 different medications, all of which have made me feel extremely sick, and frankly just didn’t work. A couple of months ago, I quit cold turkey (do not recommend by ANY means, extremely dumb on my part) because I was tired of taking something that just didn’t work. Since then, I have been dissociating quite a lot, and it has even happened at work a few times as well. I won’t get into what I’m going through/gone through, but it’s a lot. my mental health is deteriorating as the days go by, but I have no help and no way of getting any. I feel like an empty void. 

What I want to ask is, what can I do to help myself get by? What kind of action can I take, or methods can I try to keep myself in reality?",2.702574477545575,3.7958994797687886,4.742196531791908,84.76584259670969,74.43352601156069,8.097643397065362,24.86838594931081,8.617729084823388,1.469814939973321,642,20,144,12,13,222,107,173,0.139,0.7809999999999999,0.079,-0.7358,1,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,6,5,6,1,0,6,0,20,5,0,1,1,23,38,12,0,1,6,0,2,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,8,7,0,2,3,0,0,3,6,3,1,0,8,3,18,3,21,29,6,16,0,2,0,0,3,6,1,3,7,96,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12417130886483695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19051662854257626,0.0,0.10715981620204174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095466807285214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539067066647582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499440869755898,0.0,0.09033916811645304,0.0,0.12064957242405668,0.14217692405753765,0.0,0.1463524192301658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252065515466852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416559914476245,0.10007224577263288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21955600558560776,0.0,0.15921989790474847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387112498943345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14889709954658473,0.0,0.0,0.1877835894415472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490167558978575,0.0,0.14587040214702582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06843537341278247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567122259488746,0.0,0.2381797898746702,0.0,0.13254584562126154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258676139732094,0.0,0.14111454547269092,0.14116637498465512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180947577017207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15169157319875684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979818637895101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15824905049151428,0.0,0.11587454180899714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783942096306877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106434872118969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816810119667792,0.16099985039795614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951042370690902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262204203599967,0.1111879458262701,0.0,0.0,0.1259475671579728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059368689843755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cw9595cw,2020/01/02,"Stressed, Anxious and Depressed. (SAD) 24/m. Nothing makes me happy. 

I am dealing with alot right now and I have bad anxiety. 

I just could really use a hug right now.",-0.07052083333333314,1.9872396562500008,1.6087500000000006,93.02791666666668,105.5625,4.633333333333333,24.08333333333333,6.42735559955562,1.103295833333334,127,6,25,2,6,41,27,32,0.405,0.509,0.086,-0.889,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,2,0,8,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,4,1,4,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,1,2,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131085150031051,0.3147095744109297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325978367676472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22241884603848736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871977875812056,0.2399355665800443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965474361353808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18595045431122487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672994762676505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17846177795784898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.475801721753724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191058265994772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405986825154197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigBoogiee,2020/01/02,"Help 
Dude I’m so tired of it man. This goddamn rush of anxiety and fear that fuck me up until I’m up at 3 am hyperventilating and doing whatever drug I have in the bathroom. I’m so fucking tired of it. My stomach tying itself up until I can’t breath and all I can think about doings running away and out of the room but if I do that I’m gonna wake up everyone in the house so I stay still. It’s not even the anxiety anymore, it’s this recurring spider-sense/PTSD combo that spike up hours ahead knowing it’s coming soon and how I won’t even be able to handle it when it comes. I keep trying to gas myself up but nothing’s positive and I just wanna escape man. Everything feels so claustrophobic, it’s felt claustrophobic since I was six fucking years old and now at 17 I’m still feeling every bit of it.",3.3296862745098035,4.1774170470588246,5.205588235294119,82.97348039215687,72.6470588235294,8.019607843137255,25.93137254901961,8.344100000000001,1.5610196078431375,638,20,135,10,12,220,104,170,0.091,0.8420000000000001,0.066,-0.2479,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,14,4,3,1,4,0,10,9,3,1,1,24,27,18,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,15,10,0,1,5,0,0,4,3,4,0,1,2,3,12,0,24,22,2,30,0,0,0,3,3,13,3,1,12,91,27,0,0.15081911254727906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307524165772083,0.0,0.14957203334243016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14169952089976104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16465540909394727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598346220452083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17490228865562482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19922920285710166,0.0,0.12707160709606868,0.14411412525000267,0.13554649348497808,0.0,0.0,0.1697134318248761,0.15251734982239035,0.0,0.14480999964058536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.418289517849472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109087200999173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14852644566236328,0.17402500651789599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13405495695165393,0.0,0.0,0.08288623999544369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471500610307333,0.0,0.1582592881128744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17629947169974988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475912842081473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16075310685394345,0.24088867620249385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663879751144268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34668876697074386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239627739304642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712256368160767
mentalhealth,SewersideallOrganist,2020/01/02,"I don’t want to die, but I don’t want to live... I think life is just bad I don’t know what to do. My therapist is nice, but I don’t trust him. 
I don’t feel like me. I feel like I’m in a shell and it’s breaking. 
The me sunken inside is a raw nerve and should the shell break I’ll be raw and exposed and so... I’m now shielding myself from the world.
I’m afraid if something else goes wrong I’ll be done. 
And it won’t be my choice. I feel like a passenger in my body one second behind the actions.",-1.5253578595317734,0.1813615478260875,0.993913043478262,103.69267558528429,90.04347826086956,4.234113712374582,14.933110367892974,5.369823440869387,-1.2271404682274252,378,7,104,2,13,128,62,115,0.11199999999999999,0.7090000000000001,0.179,0.7717,0,0,1,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,7,0,15,2,1,0,0,17,25,9,1,4,4,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,6,3,0,2,1,3,15,5,7,19,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,4,60,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18319248774658836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437074679809021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277058577211547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245256245264674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18328320061087094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3328105148187465,0.4702250189957157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057824781419987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497095195437244,0.3215679283956363,0.0,0.1937370243390547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867327047016954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16890728419698528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547439982005533,0.0,0.14058469627095602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588193558622523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23988293081328874,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AdmiralYi89,2020/01/02,"How do I find a quality therapist? Recently I have come to identify several problems with my own mentality that are as follows:

1. I have a surprisingly fragile self-esteem.
2. I care WAY TOO MUCH about what other people think.
3. I'm far worse at dealing with stress than I thought I was.
4. I'm not as open minded as I thought I was.
5. I'm way too prone to comparing myself to other people.

Even as someone who has identified the problem, I'm having trouble overcoming these habits, and I think talking to a trained professional might be helpful. I've never used the services of a Therapist before, so I was wondering how I should begin looking. Any advice is appreciated.",2.09845930232558,4.8693041705426365,4.476855620155039,77.32598110465118,84.81395348837209,7.566085271317829,29.76792635658915,8.472884824447931,3.0561507751937995,534,28,92,14,16,185,89,129,0.11199999999999999,0.795,0.092,-0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,1,6,0,13,0,0,3,1,21,28,8,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,6,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,5,2,13,2,14,20,2,10,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,2,3,63,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15780712686115253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981941128187446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13741693851680628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16465082759485528,0.0,0.0,0.13911018890069132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166490120129349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666327614787033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759983963394266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824400682830322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356117594498482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16274493530780304,0.1713164206794471,0.16305986446854495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871445938723195,0.0,0.12455180745451358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22391503836030965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090501360909688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15945287067122918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16847032293692485,0.18243885264860168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683079216746705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849873839626991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12980034097008128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37500697370619024,0.0,0.20695381194602225,0.0,0.2564116154295734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13947636537286714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563680628970009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17513009042066596,0.0,0.0,0.16457311585059345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,makoman728,2020/01/02,"A weird obsession Hey all, I’d like to start off by saying I’m kinda lonely, don’t really have any friends, and spend 95% of my time all by myself. I guess I enjoy it, can’t complain, but sometimes it does make me upset to the point where I might even cry. Anyway, have you ever had a dream so amazing that you’re just depressed when you awake, finding out it wasn’t real? I feel like that, all the time. Dreams are so amazing. I don’t sleep often, I stay up until at least 2 am every night and wake up at around 7, 8, or 9 in the morning. For someone who loves dreams I guess you’d expect me to be asleep all the time, but no. I have a strange obsession with wanting to just live in a dream, I think about it a lot, I usually come back up with this thought about once a month, it’ll last for a week or two. Until I forget it, it just sticks with me. I get to the point where I look forward to having a dream because reality is just so disappointing. Sometimes I wish I could just disappear and lie in a magical place all alone. Is this normal or is there something wrong with me?",2.968331497797358,3.716373330396479,4.2382791850220265,89.94570071585903,73.40528634361235,7.084691629955947,24.31965859030837,7.1686216300943375,0.7706301762114536,834,23,189,8,16,275,132,227,0.171,0.645,0.184,0.8078,0,3,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,3,0,0,20,16,0,3,14,0,19,4,3,1,6,44,33,14,0,5,10,0,1,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,12,10,0,0,4,5,1,3,5,9,0,1,3,3,24,7,30,25,7,34,0,3,1,1,9,17,0,9,17,131,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482551142780822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509169131555242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448161356430384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075234615077182,0.0,0.08524130789381347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12045432576431984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164580784741167,0.0,0.15360072140460748,0.0,0.0,0.12043853584925135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223693877304898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235882082927233,0.12648756096132802,0.11781589871331608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070410554071782,0.0998972024338409,0.0,0.0,0.12780544190562834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803514726794147,0.0,0.0730573216253634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3080851069762188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398310513812505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663133666421276,0.0,0.1234756932797626,0.0,0.11742506554933888,0.0,0.0,0.11888158650311068,0.12620534746179235,0.0,0.09334006115460873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834142709727013,0.0,0.0,0.1116139020244618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122442755066807,0.13700730798630964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891829583534094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14609642401486367,0.0,0.2643760344819024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15916133097517846,0.08958103022682581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112013476153726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13993465710870565,0.0,0.11848061557946825,0.10765079151688188,0.27659815212334465,0.0,0.09897499198574083,0.14904408772163094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959977007906307,0.0,0.11101231512509233,0.24461441404998785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659717784604972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540070329484339,0.0,0.08247752206461167,0.0,0.11216613616211142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16080182053740338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15288616767601104,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,somethingsecrety,2020/01/02,"I don't know what to do anymore Honestly, I just have SO MANY issues on my mind anymore. I'm not handling them well. Or at all.

I want to talk to my husband about it or even think about it myself, but it's like there is a mental block keeping me from doing so. I tried to write my feelings but honestly couldn't do it. I tried, but I couldn't get myself to focus, even alone in a quiet room.

I want close, intimate contact with my husband but I shy away & just feel uncomfortable when either of us initiate it.

I'm struggling with a lot of things, and I feel like I'm on a sinking ship without a life raft.",2.289999999999999,3.465062069767441,3.9851860465116284,89.46708139534884,75.5891472868217,6.710387596899222,25.3031007751938,7.1686216300943375,0.9789342635658912,473,16,105,5,10,159,77,129,0.135,0.747,0.11800000000000001,-0.5035,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,1,0,11,6,0,1,5,0,8,1,0,0,1,30,20,10,0,4,11,2,3,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,7,4,0,2,5,0,0,0,5,1,1,0,0,4,18,5,18,18,3,8,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,3,3,76,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19460436929398972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20358605324938986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37268617899826667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17653518451913744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.248208066369252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850187317744585,0.13423347780520134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816829823037736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961153929038558,0.0,0.16701126729924715,0.0,0.0,0.1032631414614602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271703333042587,0.18359372485687966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974310005208495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19049781586473785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18935573312101636,0.0,0.1897221570714802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964304828751849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15102429256715055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483025351469962,0.1203966523109032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551391226854136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22601665860470244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22165274617815706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16894174633724762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811257646707013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mackenzie712,2020/01/02,"i feel completely alone my life is seemingly great. i have multiple best friends, an understanding boyfriend, supportive parents, my grades are decent - you get the jist. yet i still feel totally isolated from everyone. for months now i’ve felt numb and sometimes struggle to feel a connection with the people i care the most about. it’s hard to even imagine that anyone would care if i offed myself, which i know sounds bad. i’m aware these people love me and want me here, alive, but i still feel entirely alone and by myself. ah, idk where this post was even going. i’m tired and reddit apparently is the only place to turn to for any situation",4.116694214876033,6.535255380165293,4.400826446280995,83.1030578512397,73.71074380165291,8.36694214876033,25.876033057851238,9.095868883498916,2.2182495867768597,515,18,96,12,11,161,89,121,0.146,0.7090000000000001,0.145,-0.0553,2,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,1,9,10,0,1,6,1,6,4,0,0,1,20,24,6,0,3,2,1,6,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,5,5,0,0,9,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,2,7,14,7,11,21,3,9,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,3,5,59,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136424695145432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296802200277884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587353610566508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264259736232411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589016727930145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3087572559471733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875671767867086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000175822668082,0.0,0.0,0.1446844061494171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062417670475372,0.0,0.14538303421784127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698356888031786,0.0,0.07910857191110006,0.0,0.0860531601684969,0.0,0.0,0.1669365930403205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356389286422876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321423310098894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694954648606723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665878495305306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085874759902535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151586348412272,0.0,0.0,0.16812946703697626,0.0,0.0,0.20994547619144635,0.0,0.15819741550889246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501460194978846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378433723121062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701978449843173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975422258109755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24184190830715535,0.0,0.0,0.15829280185337016,0.0,0.0,0.17182499854738725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740303328380186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469704738937296,0.0,0.15762931901111135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930903624904439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756152954688886,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,akloveschrist,2020/01/02,"Mild PTSD Can I have super mild PTSD from witnessing my father and cousins have a plane accident? I don’t have nightmares, flashbacks, etc. But every time someone re tells the story, I relive it all over again. Opinions????",3.17625,6.225134125,3.1650000000000027,86.62000000000002,82.75,5.2,25.5,6.742157984588678,1.3290999999999995,175,7,29,2,5,53,34,40,0.076,0.8059999999999999,0.11900000000000001,0.4137,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,1,4,5,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,5,2,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668688893416923,0.0,0.0,0.2771565911745741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7690555226115917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.278720307640102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28751890358362314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918147943547956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,googlyeyepoolnoodles,2020/01/02,"everyone keeps running to me for help and i cant cope and im letting them down and i feel so bad i feel like im about to break down and scream and cry and harm myself

im trying to help them but im so stressed out that i cant even speak",-2.5806578947368406,-0.8696777719298208,0.2308552631578973,106.09786184210527,98.64912280701756,3.5517543859649123,14.142543859649123,5.148860815047168,-1.417208771929825,185,4,52,1,8,63,33,57,0.22699999999999998,0.6759999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.8170000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,2,0,4,5,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,11,6,9,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,0,4,8,1,8,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478389687374652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20363035720915967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244121970847302,0.0,0.0,0.17713777919882884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18746659697626425,0.13243494450924218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485115533825529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8009654311894971,0.0,0.0,0.16477355931499946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18956280182848825,0.0,0.0905669180342275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21235125847505426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258603148314995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ODBFOODSTAMPS,2020/01/02,"Depression And Guilt. I'm 29 (m), currently on the end of a 1 1/2 year bender of xanax, alcohol and heroin. Had a 30 day stint in rehab then relapsed, used up until 6 weeks ago when I did a home detox. Thankfully I'm off everything now but I'm going through a rough patch of depression, my sleep pattern is all over the place and I just want to be alone. I'm feeling really guilty for wanting to be alone, feeling guilty that I'm out of work (usually I'm in full time work). Not wanting validation, just wanting to put this into words and share it.  therapy starts next week and I dont share this stuff with friends or family.",2.4780816034359354,4.276259456692916,4.057609162491056,86.53526127415894,76.48031496062994,8.082748747315676,25.71868289191124,8.841846274778883,1.9176047244094487,489,18,103,11,11,163,89,127,0.17800000000000002,0.701,0.121,-0.8667,1,2,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,4,7,0,1,6,0,6,5,1,1,1,22,22,10,0,4,5,0,3,0,1,0,4,0,1,0,5,8,1,0,2,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,2,3,4,4,19,18,2,27,0,2,0,0,3,10,0,1,15,55,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381723208578615,0.173386740038127,0.0,0.3360663688104509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463229570675782,0.0,0.2794765991755612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901457390265987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143697744656232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14581212928425769,0.0,0.15294677415102798,0.0,0.16406827619527725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534732067677692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220553934310198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627413752680159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17254559356970234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950775533543108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309744113789412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393600977420077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235859145817744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483531399877615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572761300601592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14937010414715332,0.1855372062725244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946042782541268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012449782658154,0.17868600574578666,0.0,0.3827767784207626,0.0,0.2602805659850164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23622737594032825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447815688814248
mentalhealth,ThrowAbv,2020/01/02,"I think I have no or little empathy It's confusing, I'd say, for me to care for others or what they want. I still try to be nice and respectful, but it's weird because I dont know if I'm genuine or something? I dont know, it just feels like I cant put myself in other people shoes, and that all i really care about is how to better myself. Is this just being selfish?",1.8922222222222231,2.6959102592592608,4.388580246913584,87.64361111111117,76.03703703703705,7.375308641975309,22.141975308641968,7.793537801064563,0.8345456790123449,285,7,65,4,6,101,56,81,0.109,0.6659999999999999,0.225,0.8687,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,5,9,0,1,0,0,8,1,1,1,1,17,16,8,0,2,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,2,11,6,7,14,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,5,2,47,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982261518274627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028602746814876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4677186531214283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5376429093182814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115977020826279,0.16386290214058974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521129351738135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205923090775913,0.2298903000274532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901717848211622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305815087012763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14694112780018104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18240526359351528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17658123236604448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317621601270465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697186706513007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572805598282674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528913520698846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imconfusedhelppppp,2020/01/02,"Tired of this shit I’m trying to improve how I think and feel ? Anyone else on this journey, tips and good sources to help out would be great.",1.4312643678160877,3.6440794827586234,1.6075862068965527,100.75436781609196,81.75862068965517,3.8666666666666663,20.011494252873558,3.1291,-0.7359747126436784,111,3,25,0,3,33,25,29,0.162,0.524,0.314,0.7269,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,0,7,5,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,5,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23827536053327236,0.3491606787121924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846708666644144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723043126206064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858229716851992,0.0,0.3757017887187593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22841195751412424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497970541931503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21835262148315407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3916667169718292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313614839447948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420743008594363,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExtremeEmployee_,2020/01/02,"Cultural Psychiatry Why do psychologists from different cultures evaluate people from other cultures? Like, a Hindu evaluating a white person, or vice versa. There are cultural conflicts there and particularly in some of my issues discussing spiritual things in nature. Straight up racism transpires in that my God is not some arrogant punk ass white boy. Their god is their ethnicity and shares their cultural ideologies. Then I went on about the caste system and the former nobility and the coups. Machugna.

I digress, I mean, I made no presumptions about the Lord. I imagined some megalow colossal omniscient shape shifting multi-conscious, poly dimensional construct from another universe and who is an awesome God of lightning and rage. Lightning and rage...

All I have learned in my experiences is that I am a sociopath, anti-social, macabre. However, I am a good person in that I do care to an extent that I believe in humanity as a species. I have a hormonal need to soldier, protect, do warrior things. Most people are just fucking parasitic animals. I recycle, you should recycle. That's what gets me about all the famous people on the internet that really have no positive message. A few do, most people just have this dumb down sensibility to it, just entertainment. I mean, a lot of charities have gone on that were amazing. Just saying, tell people to recycle, do good things. Be less parasitic on the earth and humanity.

I meant only to go against the odds and humor people, god dammit. You can do it humanity! Don't get hostile! People just hostile, I mean, my life had been threatened so many times now it amuses me. All the idle threats and poor behavior in people. Then when I lose my temper, hoh shit, call the authorities. Like these mother fuckers started it and I'm the one that gets fucked 9/10. You need a mob with you that will support you in those types of situations. I just am usually alone talking about this cunt getting banged out across the street by some well hung brothers. I only heard stories about this shit in town, which is like some fucked up ""Satanic"" cult.

This lady is a god damn wacko, she was at my old apartments and is now here, I guess. These people are fucking creeps, I can her this cunt raging across the street to get rid of this arrogant prick. I was waiting for these people to hack her up with machete's. I'm trying to avoid a similar fate. They were going on about this pilgrimage to Africa and rebuilding Egypt. Good luck to ya.

Anyway, my psychologist should be German, or Irish, a Swede wouldn't accept me... And be familiar with some myth and all, god dammit.

Some organizations and various people wanted me to stop talking about this stuff. It's really aggravating in that I am legitimately just playing along with getting fucked over. I really don't know what to do besides keep dodging bullets.

I was eager for a time, to fuck some people up,now, it's just a huge pain in the tuft of the ass.

I just want to leave but I have a great job and get by besides the occasional lynch mob floating around. I was previously alienated here in town a few years ago. I was trying to let things pass but anytime I go to town it's like the same mother fucking people year in and year out, like regulars. It's kind of creepy, then I learned all these pretty girls I made out with were actually prostitutes. So let that be a lesson to ya, lads.

If you see a pretty girl out there, you know, follow your nose. If you see her again, maybe with a different hair-do, she's probably a hooker.





Cheers",4.183404471544719,6.643746466463419,4.916987804878051,79.28370325203255,73.66463414634146,8.092845528455285,28.31138211382114,8.889255770463159,2.5288765040650416,2806,114,497,61,60,903,308,656,0.1,0.772,0.128,0.9509,4,2,0,0,0,0,98.0,0,11,4,2,30,48,22,1,39,0,51,16,6,2,5,90,94,31,1,9,16,3,0,5,0,4,2,2,0,8,42,30,0,6,11,3,1,7,6,25,1,1,16,7,62,23,78,68,22,66,3,1,4,10,48,40,17,17,23,346,104,4,0.0,0.0,0.061613105965907064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055967596659392715,0.0,0.0,0.06539142322371587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620518848788984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056205773388288985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113435740044037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447046098894985,0.0,0.06437290341542408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193052798559665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061760603828865265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4085873001459587,0.23090721611320866,0.0,0.10764751262849244,0.15887025360673002,0.0,0.06960933207751477,0.06955308985478027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589916097252516,0.06265424036452799,0.05611952343472641,0.0,0.06574800496622656,0.06939745300904028,0.0,0.0,0.0668535109862649,0.0,0.12912477152027926,0.04459589333472338,0.15422900070139184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063472821285498,0.0,0.05367725658201288,0.0,0.11948448469177116,0.0,0.06401152936903405,0.06343011906940366,0.2063257864200528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09363133323358053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625220006759322,0.0,0.042783613496574974,0.0960378489612532,0.06718276641931982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5690308318712467,0.11025848379077048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12846710016342688,0.06807291881361922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134252458619138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05020948528525716,0.0,0.0,0.10062484842941197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961950161645125,0.0,0.07096921109159819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04468905737460247,0.0,0.0,0.05278578881284336,0.0,0.0,0.07227734800953535,0.0,0.07164770267124539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149508428972193,0.055184970132604164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16778303525902538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363198430104152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573245509840012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953705166772225,0.0,0.07448028318489756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05676820759457533,0.05852910802359122,0.05697178597087205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12197546690950865
mentalhealth,DannyTanner24,2020/01/02,I’m tired of life right now Currently in my mental state at the age of 19 going on 20. I have this thing where I feel that I am genuinely lonely and don’t wanna go out to try and continue my life. For some reason it feels as if my life itself has no purpose. I can’t talk to anybody and don’t have insurance for a therapist. I just feel alone all the time with my own thoughts. It feels as if nobody cares about me and I don’t know what to do. I don’t know what this is and I currently hate it.,1.1232929292929263,2.304443854545454,3.2293939393939404,93.67853535353537,78.63636363636364,7.070707070707071,20.404040404040398,7.793537801064563,0.4611010101010096,384,9,95,6,9,131,69,110,0.126,0.845,0.027999999999999997,-0.8519,2,3,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,3,0,11,4,0,1,1,21,23,9,0,3,3,0,4,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,10,7,0,0,8,0,0,2,6,2,0,0,1,4,13,1,16,22,3,15,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,3,6,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22002551592093547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21659845568509364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4296675950515619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24147100986682524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20974218135225625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335047877712377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4501615328981948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21409125100165635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21842543361852215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814240376684047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707525787279837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24666116946514316,0.1411368153333709,0.0,0.0,0.16865496740297312,0.12387645455194192,0.24417046471955325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14423395863138705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cup-of-Karma,2020/01/02,"My boyfriend has been googling depression and anxiety As the title reads, my bf has been googling depression and anxiety symptoms. He also googled “ wanting to be alone” 

I asked him about it and he said he thinks he might be depressed, that he just feels “blah”. I also asked if he was thinking about hurting himself and he assures me the answer is no.

Any tips/advice on how I should handle this? Or what not to do? Or signs I should look out for?
I want him to know he can be open with me and I just want him to be healthy. 

I’m worried, thanks in advance",1.5258108108108104,3.884315567567569,2.2625450450450484,95.31652027027029,82.51351351351352,5.141441441441441,25.466216216216218,6.42735559955562,0.7618702702702715,432,18,92,4,12,134,71,111,0.203,0.7120000000000001,0.085,-0.9279,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,2,0,15,1,0,1,1,28,28,12,0,6,6,0,1,1,1,3,1,1,0,0,4,8,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,4,3,14,2,12,17,0,5,0,4,1,0,16,4,0,4,0,62,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17626707856942705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868212200327268,0.0,0.2885026372297422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226658591528774,0.0,0.27598327813470197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372654028600221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4660879285248376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120649482411076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19310252572211486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913315997082224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15147534292869172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913566616716019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180430686830244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17158446819317585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18748583296366364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660713935283777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311628413501775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191817065683417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18318654790860875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vortexFish1239,2020/01/02,Is something actually wrong with me? (19m) I just don't care. For as long as i can remember I've never carred. Friends and family I can just cut them off I don't love them I've never felt the need to see them they just piss me off. I don't care about anything i do to pass the time none of it makes me happy. Is something actually wrong with me or am i just not a attached kind of guy? Should i seek processional help?,-0.05857142857142605,1.9473144065934065,2.352406593406595,94.40509340659342,86.25274725274723,5.837802197802197,18.99010989010989,7.1686216300943375,0.15366285714285688,325,9,79,5,10,111,55,91,0.239,0.6940000000000001,0.067,-0.9362,0,0,2,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,4,0,5,10,2,0,3,0,10,2,1,1,2,16,17,4,0,2,6,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,7,4,0,0,1,2,16,6,12,15,1,8,0,0,1,1,8,2,1,1,4,52,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.36191083826497306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15259518818198414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3781216848492844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17480930438887382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17804432701771644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14326472759000128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836073774531183,0.0,0.1973963968150076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242915290333905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19309946494779312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410197089260598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16736011549715787,0.0,0.12377766655312562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749588568535528,0.28603402712077164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21005893042145676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14776573374472232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855100717040559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10812721069543536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4054827659013628,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trashaccount0006,2020/01/02,"Whats wrong with me? First of all, I would like to introduce myself. I am 22 years old, male and I study computer science. My problem is that I can't get my life in order. I have so many things that I want to get rid of, but I don't know where to start. Therefore, it will all seem pretty messy.  
 I have a high school diploma, I study, I have a well-paid student job, great friends, a nice family, no money problems, I'm pretty healthy. At first glance, an almost perfect life. However, it's all a huge abstract house of cards that can collapse at any moment.  
 I personally have huge problems motivating myself. That may sound like a simple problem, but it is not! While others have problems getting motivated to work in the garden, it starts with getting up, brushing my teeth and washing my clothes. My room is an absolute mess, I've been climbing into my bed for months and have to shovel the place to sleep. I brush my teeth 1-2 times a week, and that's actually occasions like parties or a visit to my parents. I wear socks 4-5 times until they are almost in front of dandruff. Everything you can't see is an absolute disaster. However, I get what you see pretty well. Showers, deo, clothes that fit together, at least so much that no one notices my remaining decay. My diet is shit, I only eat fast food and food orders and very irregularly. Sometimes 8,000 calories a day and then 2 days nothing (not even a small snack), I eat when you can no longer ignore it and then always all I make/buy a whole family pizza is normal. I would say that I cannot motivate myself with everything that is primarily about me. So when I do something that doesn't benefit anyone else, I usually don't do it. My body has some basic needs that I satisfy and nothing more. The only thing I do for myself is playing on the computer. I can step into the game and forget everything around it. At parties I like to drink with a similar effect (I don't drink alcohol at all), I like to forget.  
 All of this has meant that I did nothing in the past 4 years and nobody knows. My parents think I will finish my bachelor's degree next semester, I just did the exames of the first two semesters and then did not register for an exam afterwards. If my parents found out, they would be angry but understandfull, but I do not deserve it. Why can't I motivate myself? Why is it so difficult!!!!  
 

It takes me away that I just can't make it. I can pull myself together for a week, but then fall back into old patterns. I have to pull myself together extremely every time. Otherwise I go to sleep for days, do nothing or go to Netflix.  
 In addition, I have the feeling that I am mentally ill. I have not yet shed tears because of a death in the family and I can not imagine ever feeling grief. It doesn't make sense to me, after all, grief doesn't change anything. Generally I have a fairly rational and partly utilitarian worldview. I could kill a person without any tear, without remorse or sadness (I would  never do it for myself, and prop not even for someone else). I am extremely emotionless in many things ...

 Am i ill? What should I do? Am I the only one who thinks like this?

I don’t know what to do …",3.231215384615382,5.021744264000002,4.786780000000004,82.1513207692308,74.36,7.8796923076923076,27.37923076923077,8.617729084823388,2.1119913846153846,2475,96,478,48,52,831,281,625,0.15,0.7070000000000001,0.14300000000000002,-0.8645,7,0,4,0,0,0,95.0,0,3,2,11,17,28,2,0,30,0,66,22,7,8,10,96,93,36,4,15,20,3,2,6,1,8,6,2,4,3,38,25,10,1,16,6,1,9,25,15,1,6,6,9,79,13,57,77,13,78,0,3,3,0,16,28,1,9,45,344,117,12,0.0,0.0,0.06366844934565967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972568400561557,0.13066430206416296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054287993202757866,0.0,0.0,0.08873592007046166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04561991895501253,0.06684989093911425,0.05369001412465498,0.058080734282184174,0.0,0.0,0.06129861314414866,0.050168385660460765,0.0,0.03977195998579292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247105355913065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901919406868373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05209179342743341,0.0,0.0,0.1262303862272385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12782799432758266,0.0,0.13352120667873635,0.10900549546557356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618571012384549,0.05901667087888016,0.054970639530230805,0.0,0.17591051856256945,0.0,0.184517889461232,0.0,0.06597836016077357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16648879893760465,0.1577859059813375,0.07153636033388372,0.050407128425954816,0.0,0.17043572794382458,0.0,0.07415900775792605,0.0,0.0,0.07193142049704176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893356163927968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528248143827314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474431480774659,0.0,0.07218249834628561,0.0,0.10756871007449538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216712357846077,0.19124868642503048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306520489550814,0.13229376287005212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0657503140964715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207690678215509,0.0,0.04796163381515114,0.04837738419198878,0.050319971223244934,0.0,0.06938742565410083,0.0,0.06392498315230785,0.2504123971326812,0.07428039615536729,0.1369245967368096,0.0,0.0884216526996137,0.14886234412299634,0.0,0.0,0.21733625631965348,0.07065257987031484,0.062282503580731514,0.0,0.1139365818377399,0.06816579043138192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19912892552109435,0.0,0.3121470951017083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05188441680451774,0.0,0.06603011761584948,0.10398157931995404,0.05939542311204076,0.0,0.0,0.06697173063668635,0.0,0.0,0.13058165625722445,0.0,0.05528078367578308,0.05022779540151913,0.06452769737002316,0.0,0.09235966735176647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049055150166120616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13003506535640316,0.0836110697588058,0.0,0.0,0.11413239575891558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06373362429202728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185672889470468,0.053832893542877416,0.038482430506197804,0.0,0.10466913728629598,0.0,0.11732386131220428,0.0,0.1177446003525731,0.07284227211792925,0.0,0.12578521623584699,0.0,0.04749819785719818,0.0,0.0,0.18538903832243656,0.07133375464823018,0.0,0.08402962015514974
mentalhealth,IEatNipples,2020/01/02,"When is it time to move on? My spouse has been battling postpartum depression since our first child and it's gotten significantly worse since our second child a year ago. She knows it's serious but refuses to get help because she says doctors don't know anything and never listen to her. Her moods have been getting worse in the last several months to the point where I don't know how much longer I can stand by her while she slowly deteriorates. 

She's improved in other ways like losing a shit load of weight and getting into shape but it only seems to make her feel worse for some reason. She used to be stay at home mom and is now getting back into working and getting out of the house, but now she's even more miserable when she's at home. 

I have my own depression issues but I'm seeing a doctor and have been on medication for several months. I run my own contracting business, but I'm just starting out so we have the stresses with money that go along with that. I've also had to take on more house keeping and taking care of the children on a daily basis. I've noticed a dramatic change in my children now that they have me around more and their mother isn't storming around the house and yelling about everything. 

I've tried talking to her repeatedly over the years and in the past it helped a lot because we used to communicate great. Now she's more interested in her phone and texting her friends to talk. When she first told me she wanted to handle her depression on her own I said ok, but if her depression started impacting our family that I would tell her she needs to get professional help. I'm at that point now. 

I believe our children are being negativity impacted by her depression but I don't want to give her an ultimatum to get help or lose us because she's stubborn and adversarial with me and I think she would just leave out of spite. 

I love her dearly and don't want to lose her, but when do I put the well being of my children before the love of my wife? It feels like she takes out all her anger on me, how much shit do I have to take from her before I say enough? How terrible of a personal I to think about kicking out someone I love because she's become so toxic to our family?",6.219319727891157,6.027983557823131,6.648330158730161,78.81611428571429,66.02947845804988,9.77708843537415,31.245442176870746,9.3871,2.5452923537414964,1763,60,352,30,25,574,201,441,0.182,0.69,0.127,-0.9792,0,0,0,0,1,0,23.0,8,0,2,6,25,31,6,2,18,1,27,9,2,7,2,69,70,35,0,7,12,4,3,2,1,2,3,5,2,7,12,29,1,3,9,0,1,4,7,18,1,3,7,9,67,12,60,58,13,60,0,9,1,3,72,28,2,5,27,248,79,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274590054608536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056606079427669036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058249345083573136,0.12602584629817334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0544286615726559,0.0,0.17259750511398486,0.07817556040780099,0.12046423938842092,0.07974952617710199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216918425403021,0.0,0.0748802718390549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30483153239884003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14490120563927136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731389749055873,0.0,0.0467522802156549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361625258526447,0.0,0.13345804171784584,0.0,0.07158121173390304,0.050568228990063975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041796672965548,0.0,0.0,0.0546876782624482,0.0,0.2588726706595381,0.06790263088834687,0.04022827805481203,0.0,0.0,0.07803980317747246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18978056259537227,0.0,0.14200459846437696,0.0,0.0,0.2450263039527841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388028872521897,0.0,0.06291622735846203,0.0,0.0,0.1167033947649269,0.05769855032167221,0.0,0.07495022123300014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916314522651629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23756815886785626,0.0,0.0601781745887502,0.1916564454678832,0.0,0.04724898667246242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130760975930163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829015706313123,0.11299850683577428,0.07523237624322181,0.10406902677970424,0.05248556909478851,0.05459311971073354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058825275316152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05383455498594701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757150473679863,0.0,0.06180601161419354,0.0,0.0,0.13382785028459449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115764691434874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277792131399036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733196013984973,0.1125808345622489,0.0,0.0,0.05640582326985799,0.06443925474121544,0.0,0.15993194038828148,0.14531787753466227,0.1171068025719984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05997520204306218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002028072275468,0.07544651275408927,0.0,0.0,0.08108303367126357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128835625573583,0.11378727772636404,0.06186848916618541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071128280726044,0.0,0.0,0.041274821858807716,0.0,0.0,0.0676373129049233,0.0,0.048057808645184684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514464748114302,0.12226960117619735,0.0,0.0,0.12525102167075705,0.0561851836347544,0.0,0.08619605616867937,0.06364347444801291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05153172266649222,0.0,0.2164053657289808,0.10056609449648536,0.0,0.0,0.09116537630805367
mentalhealth,tescokalendar,2020/01/02,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me but I’am sick of it In last days, I’m getting terribble panic attacks mid day or when I’m trying to sleep, resulting in sleeping 2-3 hours less everyday, right now as second of january I’m not going to school, but when I am, iam getting those attacks too mid day or mid class, I start swetting, my heart štarte beating and it’s getting harder for me to breath
I’m still worrying about future, thinking about worst case scenarios, thinking about how I hate myself and how I’m awful person ( because I really am)
I told about it to my mom, and she said that I made that up so I dont need to go to school

Thanks everyone for help",5.0098722627737216,4.789154248175183,5.989479927007299,82.62246806569344,68.56204379562044,9.185766423357665,30.263686131386862,8.841846274778883,2.2206357664233574,520,18,109,8,8,173,88,137,0.261,0.691,0.048,-0.9883,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,12,7,3,1,0,1,4,5,4,4,0,17,24,13,0,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,7,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,6,0,1,3,1,14,1,19,21,2,21,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,2,12,63,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3493249705369386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359043402843116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2970423544327173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17993596089459904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670444899207688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24063919039311296,0.0,0.17450922020592796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15157904268615546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18193373292637627,0.10290789088597077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119607695532433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437604673700358,0.12514740265452504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14527375325123754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17981242479488188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384051440526782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801343193785382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13405643259370476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983552189284406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13111374055869168,0.1460421428296293,0.0,0.0,0.3107610169990724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30728165998433604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866929059142537,0.0,0.12260921838651286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14134975285922471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19675158858410136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670444899207688,0.0,0.10423675977443064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591711928154448,0.0,0.0,0.16786090151931898,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fdghgsdfhgshrtg,2020/01/02,"I cannot tell if I should seek help or not Hey. I would like some help deciding if I should tell a close one about what I'm going through. I'm using a throwaway account because a few of my friends & family know of my main account and are active users. 

I'm a 24 year old male from Europe, and have been struggling since mid 2013, when I went through a severe case of a broken heart (a girl I fell in love with rejected me and started dating my ex-friend). I know it sounds extremely childish but it hit me HARD. Me & the girl attended the same class, so I was forced to see her pretty much everyday for the majority of the year and it screwed with me big time. I didn't find adequate support in my friends from the class, and I haven't told anyone outside of the class, so I entered what I would call a depressive episode where I almost lost my will to live... but when the year ended it got better and after some time things returned to normal, and I thought that I was free. 

But ever since that class ended in 2014 I have been **periodically** struggling with the following:

* No meaning, direction or point in life: I feel that there is no long term goal in what I'm doing (mainly attending university) on a day to day basis. There is graduation, but I feel like that's something that someone else told me to do; like that goal is not my own. Other than that, there is nothing.
* Nothing to be excited about or look forward to: I feel like nothing noteworthy or good will ever happen to me, so what's the point? 
* Craving of death: I wish I could lay down to sleep and just never wake back up again. I've had thoughts of suicide, never planned it though. My thoughts were more like 'what would happen if I did it' or 'how would people react' or 'how may people would come to my funereal'. I'm not planning on doing it, but I wouldn't mind if I just died in an accident, for example. 
* Not feeling adequate/low self esteem: I feel like the last couple of years of my life were wasted, I hear about other people doing things with their life, and I just sit there doing nothing. I feel like I have missed out. Also, I sometimes feel dumb when I sit in class, I'm unable to answer simple questions, I have a hard time concentrating... which just fuels the feeling of being dumb and useless. 

Here is what I mean by periodically: I can go weeks, months even without those thoughts. During that time, I make plans, I'm optimistic and I would even call myself full of life. Every time I think that never again will those thoughts return, but that always do. When they do, it's with varying degree of intensity. Sometimes I just feel a little down & useless but it's not to bad; I can take my mind off of it. Other times it's really strong, but even then I've kept a strong demeanor, only letting the occasional sigh out when I was in the presence of others. Keep in mind that usually the intensity isn't that high, the really high intensity only happens a couple of times per year. The duration is anything between a few days and a month. 

I've never ever told anyone, I always thought that I can handle this by myself, and that this is normal, that I'm just sad, I didn't want to perceived as weak, etc. Recently though I realized that perhaps it's different. Here is my question: am I mentally ill? Can I overcome this by myself? Should I say something to a close one and seek help? I'm scared.",3.616244984523672,5.118997399403876,4.6365387481371085,84.80406411211743,72.77049180327869,7.307589132179299,26.16763154877909,7.882392219407189,1.462999977072108,2649,89,529,36,52,864,284,671,0.185,0.742,0.073,-0.9974,1,1,2,0,1,1,98.0,0,0,2,9,38,33,3,3,33,0,57,11,3,5,7,118,114,47,4,19,30,0,11,7,2,14,6,3,0,4,46,24,0,2,27,0,3,10,18,15,1,2,24,16,70,18,68,71,14,90,0,7,2,2,25,29,3,16,58,367,116,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055470987642150825,0.0,0.0,0.04430007779260234,0.09218764582199633,0.18006428960254955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746819661109197,0.0,0.045586102140631635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042596024423434825,0.0462532590373635,0.0337688238642668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04899316806385445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313080632334875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047718659074206235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04422911512666553,0.12258900993288248,0.0,0.10717730985218388,0.0,0.04771240381048546,0.0,0.057492193872440873,0.057876920611106976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04627616262725027,0.0,0.09812864246837748,0.0,0.06178106697054622,0.10976540001404976,0.1503262774585065,0.04667343134875825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052222320375530686,0.0,0.25208846402419904,0.15829935588147906,0.0,0.0,0.05063084510601668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839619485141715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296552827219871,0.04646344908873548,0.044305158317969086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469592229100146,0.0,0.09924768340307058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062435200526527915,0.06564440314800775,0.1113921036154998,0.11705761054596946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04923841740282305,0.0,0.0,0.06088827111880804,0.04515504860280188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056646056559573714,0.1565110375907517,0.18944545545514788,0.05552124053454596,0.04891559081984887,0.04902362450425223,0.04651860059122105,0.0,0.06047116401142141,0.0,0.049996958686683454,0.0,0.036977190548699135,0.0,0.0,0.12068474060288563,0.0,0.0,0.05582603363115847,0.0,0.1678021892447183,0.0,0.08843295091067291,0.0,0.04072235728701445,0.0,0.17089891930895293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085524322848365,0.21261542391229865,0.0,0.05812867396455645,0.0,0.07507538519266409,0.08426214985812476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152136172936754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473405398089422,0.0,0.0,0.05635754113035552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411216230347268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709760585813064,0.0,0.05469676401198583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04405303970429995,0.05546095550699215,0.0,0.04414335675735005,0.0,0.057790000630993266,0.06258159434779335,0.0,0.09164811476851084,0.0,0.05543590197251543,0.0,0.046936762676342544,0.0852929338463687,0.10957591467121064,0.0,0.039209500111110684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582363588818825,0.0,0.06059411879902759,0.06286260599100432,0.0,0.0,0.04165081947650108,0.0,0.09683690906291936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360514325113088,0.03549545318858577,0.1088523725674403,0.2638689205163494,0.2261125459307217,0.0,0.0,0.15879945689575944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04784426777601908,0.06101075286142391,0.0,0.03267393455331048,0.0,0.04443524611696633,0.0,0.0,0.0513525503193638,0.0,0.0,0.0637025462061817,0.05339966666609261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361099295978545,0.0,0.0,0.17836570308667948
mentalhealth,DARKKINGKING,2020/01/02,"Stopped medication. Help I have bad PTSD/Major depression.  I was losing touch with reality so I stopped my medication (Zoloft).  

It's been about a month and I can't control my anger anymore.  I'm a mess.

Should I start back on it or give it more time.",-0.2832222222222214,1.8049045000000064,1.9166666666666683,91.21611111111113,104.0,5.422222222222223,21.555555555555557,6.937597516519254,0.9302888888888892,195,8,42,4,9,65,39,50,0.313,0.581,0.107,-0.8748,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,3,5,1,0,2,0,5,3,0,1,0,7,8,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,1,7,0,3,5,1,7,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,6,25,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24346477862003985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887702728430928,0.20497782238010304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27534318384403583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114442276530859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355008884877048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16454992437037047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746457771362032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4946201711053879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19595152948761316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28697017008482023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376241407974094,0.0,0.0,0.4104891278568677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431499353228904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,x-xxviii-mmxvi,2020/01/02,"The Myth of Mental Illness - Thomas S. Szasz, M.D. has anybody read this book? if so, what are your thoughts on his take?",3.364782608695652,5.4014387391304375,2.7471739130434787,95.84945652173916,74.65217391304348,4.6000000000000005,24.54347826086957,3.1291,0.03823478260869617,93,3,19,0,2,27,23,23,0.122,0.878,0.0,-0.4696,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,11,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.562329992435587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5581482587194322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195444934508923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4429874929508647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chamelbot,2020/01/02,"What do you think are the psychological effects on a 16-year-old who was in a (non-physical) toxic relationship for 6 months, and experiences two break-ups within 5 months? I am seventeen now and can't seem to understand why I'm depressed even though I'm in a good relationship now and has a good life over-all. Just trying to understand myself",9.337727272727275,7.531876106060611,9.61727272727273,65.29590909090909,60.66666666666667,13.64848484848485,38.66666666666667,12.45797560212912,4.7341575757575765,277,11,52,8,3,93,51,66,0.057,0.843,0.1,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,5,3,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,1,0,9,12,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,3,2,7,11,0,8,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,1,4,32,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18001689962061135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804675107568148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044483570705592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506092916155329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762739609286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336538169502695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21931705029410328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4487892942232201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19027157002246736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13392285702095585,0.20534771947113634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190162098367745,0.0,0.20416887567903771,0.4351660512470271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18859576038789405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459326424152282
mentalhealth,jetibbs,2020/01/02,"ADVICE NEEDED i think my friend might be showing signs of schizophrenia So this is a boy whos side I havent left for more than a couple of days in about 4 years. I know him inside and out and I am so in love with him.

But last night for the first time I was scared of him. 

For the last year or two he has gradually become a completely different person. All of us in our friend group have been trying to figure out what happened because he is just unrecognisable and its been getting progressively worse. To sum it up quickly and get straight to the point, he is emotionless, wont talk to us, wont acknowledge us, doesnt care if any of us live or die. He only cares about himself now.

And then last night i witnessed something that can only be described as hard core mental illness. 
It started off small, with him yelling at me because he got kicked out of a club because as i said to him... that didnt happen?
Then it grew to him saying that a couple of months ago me and his roomate stole from him while he was asleep and his roommate admitted to it and he remembers what we said and this whole elaborate story... 
Which also never happened.
He then claimed a girl walked up to us when we were shouting and asked for directions... somewhere around the time i slapped him.
I can categorically say with 100% certainty that this girl never existed and i never touched him.
At one point i even saw in his eyes that he was going to hurt me and when i said thats not ok he said i attacked him first. 
But i didnt.

I can go on but i think you are starting to get the jist. I spent an hour being yelled at for things that were happening entirely in his imagination and he adamantly believes it is all categorically true. I thought maybe he was just drunk, but this morning it continued... more things i never did and never said.

I dont know how to reason with someone who is making it up as they go?
I dont know what I can do to help him because i know he wont believe me if i say i think he has a problem... 
I could do with someone to talk to who maybe knows a little more about it ??",3.923670824162386,4.717132647754138,4.771906741664631,86.83,71.22222222222223,7.6311730659492945,27.352164343360236,7.753152298057669,1.390764147713377,1622,54,349,19,29,526,200,423,0.05,0.897,0.053,0.5009,1,0,1,0,1,0,42.0,8,1,1,3,15,11,1,1,14,1,39,5,2,3,8,68,76,35,1,5,11,0,2,0,2,4,1,11,0,4,28,25,1,0,17,3,1,5,15,4,0,4,20,15,57,7,56,48,6,60,0,1,2,1,64,24,0,5,31,247,85,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829181044973408,0.06194974053518766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05588782538363138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047524890466841024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062213374985071936,0.06533399529367571,0.07950543744759149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040747787146338,0.07718361903020461,0.0,0.1574752266356261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425069112169194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327416290807663,0.0,0.0,0.055798300730848606,0.1546551049674517,0.0,0.045070701727649966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253065574980581,0.07301601699209635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381179119819111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04615905746162573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188900267547826,0.0,0.0,0.10798753223223452,0.0,0.1095376838926298,0.0,0.11915350800531956,0.0,0.05589423484223062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471999086761749,0.0,0.0626041473982128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04684312643967123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882365277360923,0.0,0.07481443041438632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19203764608103027,0.17089930293017672,0.0,0.0,0.07593136580984428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004415230610417,0.06171063651570813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307486207756963,0.0,0.046649461390066885,0.0,0.14041980192144465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042867134558227,0.07413802380586768,0.0,0.0,0.05578235485040449,0.0,0.0,0.05181959871427277,0.26950203691812197,0.0,0.0,0.1311665921520829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04735657618819274,0.10630293562388846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102177751360624,0.0,0.0,0.13212975715319153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687148335182237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185446862429787,0.0,0.0,0.07916723781611025,0.0,0.33238804639720193,0.16672850567927647,0.06996809828405601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842839684432455,0.05380167294039708,0.0,0.0,0.09893137009141596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234347216319256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928583334010152,0.1343404202812356,0.0,0.055481693971380405,0.08150220118081497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04744802051366255,0.0,0.06826848724007682,0.0,0.4203213894063642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802524616889127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121982546884305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000861186028543
mentalhealth,PingusNoots,2020/01/02,"How do you pass time when feeling depressed I saw a post here recently that was basically just people commenting what they did to spend time when they were feeling really depressed. It had some great tips, but i cant find it and i would really like getting some tips. So, what do you do when you are having a depression episode?",4.457619047619048,6.303712857142859,4.870031746031747,82.5888571428572,71.22222222222223,8.84952380952381,28.473015873015875,9.3871,2.538069206349206,262,10,50,6,5,83,45,63,0.13699999999999998,0.7340000000000001,0.128,-0.384,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,3,2,0,7,5,0,0,2,0,11,0,0,1,0,10,15,7,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,3,0,0,5,3,8,2,1,9,2,8,0,3,1,0,6,0,0,2,7,38,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6431510844455357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517102566473229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274969772756963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300439135440022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744214356070258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160364859580193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17256114410380316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383846137403234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189130806009627,0.0,0.2457661619795907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2902799701624032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17681677106717655,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GumElf7,2020/01/02,"Mentaly ill, drugs, or energy catcher??? or maybe people is just bad 
I have this situations where I HEAR people talking to me but being shady. I am very wierd to people, I know I don't have an ""acceptable"" apearence or personality, in those moments I just close to myself, I barely speak unless they straight adress to me, I get super stressed, paranoic, sacred, awkward, sad, and I just don't know if I'm going crazy or whaaaat This situations had happen while I was on marihuana and cocaine. I'm also currently studying magick. And this happen un public spaces, with friends and their families, and random people. I just don't know if people is really stupid and mean when they communicate or if it's me",5.080454545454543,6.813469166666668,6.095878787878789,74.8688181818182,69.45454545454545,8.31030303030303,29.10909090909091,8.841846274778883,2.507949090909091,558,21,95,10,10,185,83,132,0.158,0.746,0.096,-0.8215,1,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,3,1,7,8,1,2,1,0,11,2,0,0,0,28,22,19,0,3,14,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,5,8,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,2,2,18,3,8,19,0,11,0,1,0,0,9,6,0,9,4,66,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525728899291298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122075482055796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19614303457431514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944553217225196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067336897173973,0.0,0.08836611590079314,0.0,0.09612338260415416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991312442139484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906275650458848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27885670500009985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699189546063382,0.18423772203268116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5862849572998498,0.1476822570812789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835228452705777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3802299076476976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19374370082828046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594439734002114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13955418172804904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRAUndertow,2020/01/02,"Can someone tell what is wrong with me from my graph on my profile I do not know what conditions I have. I was referred to a psychiatrist a few weeks ago. I have seen some information through an online system about myself recently. It says nothing other than depressive episode. 

I do not know how long I have been bad. I want to say how long it has lasted. That word is wrong in a sense. It is not how long it has lasted. It is how long do I feel normal. About half a day every so often. Has it gone on months, years. I was asked my mood out of 10. I take it 5 would be perfect neutrality, and the psychiatrist acknowledged. My mood is at a 4 nearly always, 3 often. I get a mixture of 5 and rarely 6 for half a day every so often. Why am I asked ""how often"". This isnt a cycle. The number of days a week I feel a certain way changes from one week to the next. All I know is I feel shit. It infuriates me. I have looked at mood graphs for unipolar, bipolar etc. What I feel doesnt match. 

My graph can be seen on my profile with levels labelled. The black curve is about 3/7 days, the green curve 2/7 days, the light green curve 2/7 days, over the past few weeks. It changes though. It is not fixed. My personal scale is actually -5 to 5, so the scale should be 0 to 10 really. The graph is innacurate. My internal state might change 10 or 20 or 30 or 40 times a day, it might change less than 10. I also have odd spikes going to 7 or 8 lasting maybe 30 seconds some days. Furthermore, when I choose to not sleep for a night, then the following morning I feel a strange euphoria, a sustained 8 for the morning, tapering off through the afternoon back down to a 5 then a 4. I think this is adrenaline.

I do not know my internal state. Why am I expected to tell the psychiatrist everything. I have no one to tell. I never talk about anything. I only ever have written about them a few times online. That is why I gave a list of everything to my gp. The psych then acted as though he had not seen the list. Maybe he thought I was lying.

A person's experience of life is the signed sum of areas under their graph. Look at the areas for me. Hope is a strange concept. The last things left I can identify that can change anything are antidepressants. These take a month to work. I am not on them yet. I have first semester exams coming up in two weeks. I have not studied. I tell my relatives otherwise. I hate my relatives. I am an annoyance to them. I do exactly what I am told. Never any trouble at school. Lead a boring life. Don't drink. Don't go outside by yourself until age 15. Don't take risks ever. ""Where are you going"" Good boy. Quiet boy. Now ""Why don't you talk to us"" ""You seem such an unhappy young man"" ""you dont seem very happy at university"" ""you talk to me like I am a piece of dirt"" ""you sound just like your father"" ""you will end up like your father, without any friends"" ""you are a really unlikeable person"" ""any plans to meet with your friends"" ""you spend all of your time in your room"". Don't step out of line. Anything out of the ordinary is ""crap"" or ""bollocks"". My parents and grandparents a mixture of stupidity, intolerance, insensitivity, disease, hate, disgust. My mother in particular is backwards. The house is a tip. Moderate hoarding. Screaming if I offer help. I do what I have been told to do. And I hide what I think. If I were to not hide it they would truly hate me. Currently I am bearable. 

Going out of existence sounds more and more pleasant each month. I have not told a gp or the pyschiatrist that I have thought about methods. I assured them I had not. It started with thinking jumping is a very bad idea. A potential one way ticket to a life of paralysis. The university bars the windows. But I wouldn't jump. I know most suicides are impulsive. I do not think I could do something like that impulsively. More and more it has come into my mind a few more methods I could not use. Also how I would use multiple methods. I do not want to write out what I think. 

Masturbation and eating are the only pleasure I experience. I talk to people online. That raises my mood until they disappear. They have people they already know. They just need someone to use for a few days. Throw me away. I am worthless anyway.

Do I live to 30, 25, 20. Do I finish university. Do I go when I fail my exams. Do I go when I accept I am incapable of connection. Some people hate me. Most people find me an inconvenience. I am not worth anyone else's time. I give what I can. Reciprocation is not something I have ever experienced. This is why I do not think antidepressants can work.",1.1598082276523378,3.5841352021857915,3.0455804722136333,88.60196798639036,84.95628415300547,6.250644396329519,22.183988040004124,7.5680677535414835,1.0491136199608209,3550,124,736,64,106,1184,359,915,0.109,0.831,0.06,-0.991,3,0,6,0,0,1,151.0,1,14,10,7,37,39,9,1,60,0,103,10,3,10,11,127,163,38,1,15,30,4,5,4,2,8,4,6,2,6,34,20,3,0,28,3,2,17,31,20,0,8,19,21,123,15,91,131,21,115,0,3,8,0,61,34,2,22,63,511,157,8,0.0,0.0,0.04876615918723661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04429779484788901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05514613138890513,0.07992632098055476,0.04158130040372634,0.0,0.0,0.10194947532699017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03494208281704655,0.05120294991774429,0.12336985441658453,0.0,0.09343548157294718,0.0,0.04695100881623985,0.0384259316259206,0.08345025590077851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643225207712441,0.08609413463746933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797982899454434,0.0,0.0,0.29005439141153744,0.0,0.04304142443681574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856764739830494,0.048954233879021175,0.0,0.0511345610477873,0.041745789310008836,0.0,0.04426099098534398,0.0,0.055732784627678604,0.0,0.13560953956120264,0.08420833192910744,0.0,0.08982450427797227,0.09776580455089734,0.0,0.0,0.12633852589392666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045674154302907374,0.04250676410542808,0.0,0.0,0.07721758812268502,0.0,0.026108679967930457,0.04793837982315136,0.1704038663415511,0.041914740681901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053196882172507454,0.0,0.19735083261573505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03349565610980481,0.0,0.0,0.049634179620466214,0.0,0.05766180127770432,0.0,0.0564131102193388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16478217682291166,0.16293772328872855,0.0,0.0,0.05429549883673788,0.0,0.10589161507268584,0.09765657330963644,0.0,0.04412682107607483,0.17689711363944224,0.08392898585476156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004086138918406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602630263204504,0.05045819445886987,0.0,0.11966322812402133,0.0,0.0,0.03705413344937159,0.07708407389184241,0.0,0.053146547148805325,0.0468960058577596,0.04896264847793684,0.04795016584561408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158841079365463,0.07601300010805764,0.0,0.0,0.055488783857457015,0.0,0.04770460903968349,0.13857914802853669,0.13090273622772644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402759907852197,0.0,0.04934202528364032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948061418896586,0.0,0.05057505341970424,0.0,0.09098656204896273,0.0,0.0,0.051296271714461335,0.0,0.0,0.05000880264415398,0.0,0.08468343502737452,0.07694287174724197,0.0,0.0,0.03537094343309545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0546620370661481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11271978286924847,0.16066469494114913,0.17471341501391574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033199649969305474,0.19212297988616053,0.0981958734931726,0.07934550414982215,0.11655796316074699,0.0,0.0,0.14325320626759394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04881607923150103,0.0,0.06011102069919715,0.12948113729896046,0.0,0.08246544349679485,0.05895040169075341,0.07933202700040293,0.20042548009857405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254630033887643,0.0,0.0,0.04817191200194086,0.0,0.07276146039730402,0.0,0.0,0.10649754447432164,0.1092746335225774,0.0,0.0321807887190864
mentalhealth,yooq2,2020/01/02,"Does anyone have experience / help with OCD? This last year it's gotten to a point where I can't keep putting up with it. It's mainly checking that doors are locked. People kind of just shrug it off rather then helping,

I have bruises on my hands from how often and how violently I have to check the locks. It's completely distressing and frustrating. I feel so unsafe if I don't check that i can't walk away, It makes me want to scream and cry but I cant stop, my brain gets stuck in these hellish loops. 
These thoughts are slowly destroying me and they continue to get worse and worse. 

I've started taking photos of my iron when I leave to house to try to stop myself from feeling so distressed that I must drive half an hour back home to double check. It works... but not very well...

Does anyone have any tips to help with the door locking thing? Its my car as well as my house... ( it's also really embarrassing, I swear I look like I'm trying to break into my own car haha ) 

Thanks in advance guys...",2.8765408252853386,4.660386422885575,3.4629675153643578,91.29381913959615,75.31840796019901,6.520456540825284,21.276265730172668,7.285733465282438,0.4611976002341227,785,19,168,9,17,246,129,201,0.19399999999999998,0.68,0.125,-0.9565,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,1,2,13,14,4,3,4,1,11,2,2,3,1,27,26,17,0,4,6,0,3,1,0,1,0,1,3,1,16,9,0,3,3,0,4,6,5,8,2,1,3,5,21,6,26,22,3,26,1,0,1,0,5,9,0,2,11,105,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157091086168412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487567787062624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951056903144962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310798934628126,0.1072792076406417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15574601914058325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462798926629186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532517969032685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24418281872845174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13647343867513625,0.0,0.0,0.14108698349158044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578272437320874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13814279456834075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28054394218819584,0.0,0.1399459435930649,0.0,0.13739517642833213,0.3219655108130933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240082490315206,0.0,0.14528446562203462,0.0,0.11372417732998916,0.0,0.14772732075422784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816048019048544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171583188695914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312802677094506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967228416264874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188773454971767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025213477560422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937753498269224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987501571060095,0.0,0.0,0.2332832798212177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048986841261214,0.0,0.0,0.12844760673210326,0.0,0.0,0.09268824442115048,0.0,0.0,0.1107601358622393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18944443914053866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115115327875389,0.082290163385597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508833145259754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156932425462953,0.0,0.28435748732124605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984374272673941
mentalhealth,ok_shut_up,2020/01/02,"2019 sucked for me, but everyone I know has only said positive things about it (M, 17) 2019 was a year I want to forget desperately, because of how terrible and chaotic school life and home life is, but everyone I know (Youtubers, relatives) has only ever talked about how 2019 was awesome.

Why was 2019 a pile of shit? To cut a long story short, it was because of my problems I’ve had at school. My grades were beginning to decline in the second half of the year because of a huge change to the marking system for exams and assessments, despite all my effort to try to bring them back up, I began dropping my selected subjects (IT, design) because they ended up being pretty terrible, the lack of help from my teachers to get my grades back up, and one of my close friends got kicked out of the school despite having not done anything wrong.

So after trying to ignore with New Years Eve, I wake up the next morning and see all of my favourite Youtubers making videos about how 2019 was awesome for them, as well as hear my relatives say the same, and I can only think to myself, where and why did it go wrong for me?",15.693472222222221,7.250611032407409,13.691666666666665,61.02000000000002,56.73148148148147,16.43703703703704,50.814814814814824,10.864195022040775,5.553181481481482,877,32,165,11,6,279,124,216,0.14300000000000002,0.696,0.161,0.7665,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,3,1,12,11,3,0,11,0,15,4,2,4,3,29,30,15,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,1,0,5,10,0,1,3,1,0,2,1,9,1,3,12,4,21,2,37,17,4,29,0,0,1,0,9,11,2,0,14,115,26,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303161046619996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19254714878955725,0.0,0.30529096745770995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324484419293562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812639902154793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089292121520687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325351174032275,0.0,0.2392741503342945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673172386665052,0.0,0.06541353291604936,0.0,0.07115589485723234,0.0,0.1001364801793747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14111316734612075,0.0,0.0839211023374103,0.0,0.1255890727389216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376168686789697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17686952274362264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108009403388176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357414461527883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092208341202737,0.13315508158830586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848409655524817,0.2856681508251426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737672123539834,0.0,0.1198026055124706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909696631097555,0.09956665328970772,0.0,0.38013713358902695,0.09977078373717624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851934155177835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100633633372972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317947896010094,0.08022519001439088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700095825312964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738481234238763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257276212522488,0.0,0.22595292617838664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27378020817591514,0.0,0.2418803728943078
mentalhealth,Loeli_fox_furry,2020/01/02,"Constant anxiety I’m very new to reddit and I’m hoping just to find some help or a support system. In the UK child and adolescent mental health services (CHAMS for short) work on people under the age of 18 in desperate need of mental care.
I have been pretty much kicked out of therapy because they have a recommended time to spend with a client, and if you go too far over that then they don’t want to deal with you.

Hearing my therapist talk about the constant dread of having to leave me as a patient gave me such bad anxiety so I just decided to discharge even though I wasn’t ready. But she’d done all she could and I don’t think I can be helped anymore because I don’t even really understand how to survive anymore.

I’ll make another post about my mental health backstory later but I’m posting here right now because I’m having such severe anxiety.
It’s not having panic attacks it’s just that low level anxiety and constant feeling of dread that will never go away, it’s been around for a month, maybe longer. 
I’m 100% that my anxiety has been the thing to cause me to catch some sort of cold which just makes me more anxious, because there’s only so much time I have to do things and my nan who lives half way across the world and who I know I’ll never see again when she goes back is here and I can’t be sick because I want to make the most of my time with her around.

I feel like I have people around me but I’m still so lonely, all I ever want is my partner because I like the way they hold me and they make me feel like I’m worth something. I’m not saying I have no other support by any means it’s just nothing is ever the same they just always seem to know what to do and when. I so fucking lonely and I just want to be held and I don’t want to be worrying constantly about the future and how I have to leave or do this or that I just want to remain in a moment with them. They’re literally the only friend who is deeply and truly there for me, not that I have any other friends anyways really...

This constant state of dread and worry has caused me to want to fucking die because it’s so unbearable, what the fuck is the point of living when all you can do is worry about what’s going to happen next. But I guess my anxiety has been the only thing that kept me around at the same time, I’m too scared to off myself because I don’t know what’s going to happen after and I don’t want to leave the people I love. I really love them.

I don’t know my thoughts are everywhere and I feel like I’ve been hit by an actual bus, maybe I’m just having as much as a panic as my weak ass body can have right now.
I’m so tired I just want to sleep but I can’t sleep because there’s no one next to me when I wake up. 

I know these problems seem dumb, I know things could be worse but I just need to put my thoughts and stuff somewhere before I mentally explode.

Sorry for this all being so long I guess it’s just my anxious ramblings and honestly the thought that someone, anyone, out there could be reading this right now and knowing how it is and knowing that I’m not crazy makes me feel a bit better I think.
I might try to sleep or I might write more poems idk my mind is a mess rn.",3.1536856116889567,4.027006432392273,4.25553956166419,89.52510230931155,73.08618127786032,7.153652798415058,23.97625681030213,7.333567415737692,0.8162521297672116,2511,67,554,26,48,820,261,673,0.154,0.713,0.133,-0.9699,0,4,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,3,7,3,56,32,5,6,26,0,61,16,6,10,8,131,134,52,1,17,27,0,5,4,3,3,5,2,0,2,36,31,0,3,24,1,2,6,18,18,0,2,13,9,78,14,72,106,15,72,0,3,1,6,31,26,5,16,38,377,114,3,0.0,0.0,0.048709178127951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04153271452813216,0.0,0.0,0.06788690130639077,0.05233951881659082,0.2291059186435237,0.11277795281944797,0.09900319026079456,0.034901254567995484,0.0,0.0,0.17773731642772972,0.0,0.056784747237786024,0.0468961486783601,0.03838103265654155,0.041676374018788605,0.27384576709814457,0.0,0.042473411731248745,0.0,0.0,0.04414516164028896,0.05449351202131678,0.05544355945858472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05089097798137784,0.10255151662930156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26969824893334765,0.0,0.11955757385981886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051459474339650375,0.0,0.0,0.05180318586962713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05107968137597072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593587796861464,0.09030072395045692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261909050200666,0.10697640501376067,0.0,0.0,0.045620786111982975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712736285089733,0.138434959378197,0.0,0.0,0.1134698380688352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997250633527604,0.0,0.0882781403513026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611318055597324,0.05625706865282041,0.0,0.06691303589035125,0.0,0.0,0.04957618431842309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21945284836728726,0.0,0.0,0.15855618008824882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754246600477323,0.0,0.0881505217485859,0.04417260433357622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009924893486662,0.0,0.16659098791576135,0.0,0.10029129095158217,0.0543713296360732,0.0,0.0,0.20120758675345898,0.10590241567566376,0.050399236332623616,0.0,0.039841135678257485,0.0,0.11007830984511073,0.07402167472867913,0.0769940046254164,0.04820756330602985,0.10616889560719156,0.0,0.0,0.047894138237774116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033823236437961965,0.11388627351461753,0.0,0.11712740465175857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038129184045166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047185168105513785,0.0,0.09560824592983977,0.050780810083687525,0.0,0.04776126515940682,0.0,0.0501776801242222,0.0,0.0,0.04992782960996262,0.0,0.09592917857175674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787967500145275,0.0,0.039693872336603285,0.04997294403150348,0.0,0.039775252273099235,0.09088024835166293,0.0,0.056388976409723984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149851108835972,0.0,0.042292243124969486,0.03842648373457923,0.0,0.055874997029008916,0.0,0.0,0.03986164209446014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05713995689099704,0.0,0.11328436238235612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040119241371430234,0.0,0.0,0.057081377381104186,0.05795437508733538,0.13264343069804588,0.0639661642808306,0.04904056802017467,0.11887918875608199,0.11642177043366403,0.057369170543909574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03388854823392001,0.0,0.0,0.05196256961414735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04118454317125273,0.264966843613822,0.07923933110207718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03633822095497047,0.15207125093011384,0.05086695850498715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,holyrootbeerr,2020/01/02,"A breath of fresh air I went out with a couple friends today to drive around a nearby city and chat shit about the absolute monstrosity of a movie they call 'cats.' Just us, no restrictions. It was a nice relief from the monotony of everyday life and helped put things into perspective to catalyst a healthier mindset. 

Sometimes you just need a getaway, I guess

I'm just really thankful to have these friends in my life. After a while of being stuck in this suffocating hole, Im actually feeling alright. Ready to take on the world 😎

Thanks for reading x",4.410566239316243,6.6846620865384665,4.914743589743591,80.40803418803421,72.36538461538461,8.468376068376068,29.824786324786324,9.150863307647796,2.771800427350428,443,19,80,10,9,141,80,104,0.07,0.687,0.243,0.9552,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,1,1,0,5,8,1,0,11,1,3,4,2,0,0,13,12,3,0,1,3,0,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,1,2,0,3,1,1,0,0,3,1,6,7,19,8,0,15,0,0,0,0,8,8,1,1,4,50,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.1988425456789496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813915868576033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20806402117159475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22545903443115398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302830702586567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148523904569031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22446707124639967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657752919371682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22009817666916093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28784658129100216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510871133958187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20483732297751428,0.0,0.0,0.20381737326364174,0.0,0.1305353036477868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091590033240134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20152605794114492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320384017424676,0.0,0.0,0.3751937743830927,0.0,0.0,0.13537057306892744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314277093719345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451008768867061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888896307576008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wewereonabreakkkk,2020/01/02,I’m so fucking tired of how psych hospitals are portrayed in shows/movies. It only perpetuates the weird stereotypes society has about those with a mental illness. Newsflash: not everyone sits around rocking and muttering to themselves. Or attacking nurses. It’s ridiculous.,6.535984848484851,10.49925275,5.506363636363638,68.64621212121216,78.31818181818181,8.387878787878789,39.15151515151515,8.841846274778883,5.10999696969697,227,14,27,6,6,68,43,44,0.276,0.7240000000000001,0.0,-0.9076,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,3,0,2,0,2,3,0,1,0,6,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,18,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3421495242288972,0.0,0.4372491864141924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.367259179133574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3553217856544396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38733047996104425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29231253614336017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4417493141342991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,megafishy,2020/01/02,"Friend was put in psych ward for suicide, what to do? I don't really know what to do in this situation. She called me using the ward phone and told me that they won't let her have access to her own phone. I live too far away to provide any physical help, but I told my other friends who live near her. Is there anything I can do to help?",2.84375,3.4589836527777784,3.9565555555555565,92.344,73.58333333333333,7.426666666666668,22.73333333333333,7.554174236665415,0.5585133333333339,261,6,63,3,5,85,51,72,0.036000000000000004,0.805,0.159,0.8504,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,10,0,0,1,0,4,14,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,0,12,2,10,9,1,6,0,0,0,0,15,5,0,0,0,44,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15207765142217106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18403035087520764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21010993327157715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22835361003506655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34555556306252805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997920703967704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290247873804892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22867920648700504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.394942884744747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22481225686423545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14326459546993114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513721060081273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446174693584923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4273805450787637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931465287167055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pregnantthrowaway756,2020/01/02,"Don’t want to live like this anymore. I am having a baby soon so it is crucial that I get my mental health under control. 
I am infrequently suicidal, it has been bad enough before to make me afraid of driving my car, but it is infrequent. 
I mostly experience feelings of hopelessness, pointlessness, worthlessness, and lack of control of my life or direction in life. What can I do? 

I am currently going to therapy, though I have skipped the past few sessions because when all my therapist says to do is breathing exercises and meditation it feels stupid, like it’s not actually addressing the problem. Should I keep going and just try what my therapist says? Should I tell her that I don’t think it’s addressing the problem and that I want to try something else? Or should I find a different one who will deal with my thinking patterns directly? I’m also going to ask my dr about antidepressants that are safe for pregnancy and breastfeeding, if there are any. 

Is there anything else I can do?",5.951114345114341,7.419340627027029,6.543783783783784,73.49347193347195,67.05405405405406,10.44906444906445,34.771309771309774,10.560738912317856,4.03033056133056,796,38,138,22,13,260,113,185,0.138,0.802,0.06,-0.9572,2,0,1,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,0,2,9,10,1,1,5,0,24,6,1,3,1,32,38,13,1,9,6,0,2,2,0,4,5,2,2,0,14,6,0,4,5,1,0,5,3,7,0,1,1,4,22,3,15,33,5,11,0,2,0,0,7,2,0,4,6,104,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.13380237682409135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096491080724936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324144954937368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597911809623145,0.0,0.0,0.11283220457586972,0.0,0.12818201927860656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144835145129208,0.08358272946401704,0.0,0.11667294871083447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075674725940725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413573425254014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432537602462211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22908040842957544,0.0,0.0,0.14167424143870574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13412269121712325,0.0,0.0,0.13865676797842816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253186739947073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163581249111273,0.0,0.2337732017091249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574456310324976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218722137779691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936937419802026,0.13397283935316945,0.0,0.12107317123337293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152390164354436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13817751796146388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291122538332383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308897436533054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623969873467098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21807530605579475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555618169481258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997921926587648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198426869243488,0.0,0.1568005098735578,0.3183972069358576,0.0,0.17571277418421646,0.13471269305070746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618126911956184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617454397151326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BritPetrol,2020/01/02,"Constantly angry As the title says, I am basically constantly angry to at least some extent. It's like theres this ball of rage constantly inside me. I often punch walls when I'm at home but then my hands get bruised and people ask questions. 

It's really starting to affect my quality of life as obviously I don't enjoy being angry and it can sometimes lead to me having extreme opinions and being easily annoyed by others. I want to get rid of the anger but I dont even know what I'm angry about so how can I do that. 

Is this an actual disorder? How can I get rid of it either way? I just never hear of anyone having this type of thing. For context, I'm a female teenager and I feel that may be relevant.",2.2723023872679042,4.173831986206896,4.791724137931039,80.57453580901861,77.41379310344827,7.49602122015915,22.877984084880644,8.384062270229773,1.5879920424403189,558,17,106,11,13,197,93,145,0.205,0.754,0.040999999999999995,-0.9799,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,9,5,3,0,4,0,14,2,1,4,2,22,26,13,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,1,1,2,1,0,12,4,0,0,3,1,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,4,13,2,17,22,4,12,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,5,8,79,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.18360574353757894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155776881552356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17589339977673202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6099648907577253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156344206852896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22050857863390988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427027477685572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513350803426493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29489939405877197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21205697398779375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887282330331788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034014659672372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328948123305977,0.09191982746172844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14511168131446406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043844305480512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107693204410692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053271296804162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962319678446118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18608362503175435,0.0,0.13317243918522229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499746790387142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097482880200417,0.14934347964361042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stupidpterodactyl,2020/01/02,"I have a dream Most people think it's insane, dangerous, unrealistic. But I've been obsessing over it since I was 9 years old. Should I go for it?",1.4680000000000002,3.583901800000003,4.043333333333333,83.885,81.0,8.0,20.0,8.841846274778883,1.3040000000000005,114,3,25,3,3,40,25,30,0.281,0.6509999999999999,0.068,-0.7351,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,2,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30757208630002264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5678903366884474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751946354730996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4476799073765713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3467742077595973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485101319920981
mentalhealth,Greenface1998,2020/01/02,"I’m having an exceptionally bad day today I have no idea why but today is the worst I’ve felt psychologically for a very long time, I’m at a 1 or 2. I’m just racked with thoughts of how terrible I am and how there’s no hope for a garbage person like me, I feel paralyzed and under attack by my own brain, I don’t know what to do.",1.094369369369371,2.2207909594594604,4.04972972972973,87.99504504504505,78.5945945945946,7.095495495495496,20.44144144144144,7.793537801064563,0.4565927927927924,257,6,64,4,6,93,57,74,0.26,0.6509999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.9279999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,5,0,6,1,1,2,0,15,14,6,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,2,6,2,9,12,2,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,6,39,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914408425592247,0.0,0.0,0.21389894557401046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2859807297151869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652144017810159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12953190943460546,0.0,0.245972222576816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25444376582552136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28919515374079113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14078939799265544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12515622530947454,0.0,0.0,0.2267105455467489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236858109830537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20337768279422253,0.14938016156584094,0.0,0.4856558869147366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21137468327515332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311618972056685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prior-Win,2020/01/02,"Something Is Holding Me Back In almost every situation I’m in, I find something to blame. Maybe other people are like this I don’t know. But in the situation I’m in now, I can’t get a grip on life. Things I once enjoyed, don’t interest me. I can’t get shit down.  It’s like something is telling me not to. The only thing that comforts me is skating and that’s close to juvenile violence in the eyes of my parents.",1.5481896551724148,3.3759027126436787,3.84205459770115,86.88653017241379,79.34482758620689,6.648850574712642,26.96695402298851,7.645422480735847,1.5490471264367809,324,14,69,5,8,112,55,87,0.113,0.726,0.161,0.5106,1,0,3,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,4,0,8,3,2,0,0,8,13,2,0,0,2,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,2,10,5,11,13,0,10,0,0,1,0,2,8,1,1,4,45,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027469058836744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15568881178950605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705917668886833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850561459936976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21156699081084088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127356027607553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301227523149426,0.19783561801473734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20341078444675748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156265451950515,0.0,0.15398941764883706,0.0,0.0,0.22482168839817254,0.0,0.0,0.14036889922020238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078350544679813,0.0,0.4551750213148458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4676195385951217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769698406534842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690273904543152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Scarecrow_1912,2020/01/02,"So called “Proments”. Good morning/evening/afternoon, my fellow members of the mental health community, I have a very serious thing to present before you, recently I encountered a post while scrolling through Reddit, it was about being “proment”, i.e. someone, who advocates that mental illnesses shall not be gate kept, but rather be left as a choice as is gender, now, this post further called out the holy Bible DSM V as BS, and stated that one does not need to have the clinical symptoms, to be mentally ill, i.e. one can choose they are mentally ill if they wish, and feel that it's cool.

Mental illness is already not taken seriously, and a post like this further damages the image of our community, we need to spread awareness about mental health, as this post stated that one does not need to go through trauma to have PTSD or have an inherent emptiness for depression, this rather makes it difficult for the people suffering from these rather very real illnesses, to be taken seriously and get the important treatment required.

I would love to believe that this post was rather a troll, but if it wasn't, and a movement like this is stirring in a pot, we need to do our best to spread awareness about mental illness in an even better way.

Thank you for giving your time for reading this post, I hope you have a great time ahead.

Tl;dr : I saw a post saying they are “proment”, that is someone who advocates that mental illnesses are a choice of people if they feel that makes them cool, it stated that one does not need to have clinical symptoms to be considered mentally ill, I would love to believe it is a troll, but if it isn't, this is damaging to the image of mental health community, and so, we need to further better our ways of spreading awareness and knowledge.",19.374288990825683,8.900758917431197,16.26501146788991,51.25329701834864,53.09785932721712,19.530428134556576,59.22362385321101,13.427899808715575,7.43764862385321,1414,60,244,26,8,441,144,327,0.138,0.688,0.174,0.9354,1,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,6,4,5,5,11,22,0,0,20,2,30,17,0,2,0,47,52,22,0,18,17,0,2,2,1,3,15,1,1,0,28,11,0,2,4,1,0,2,7,9,0,4,7,6,22,13,38,36,1,28,0,4,1,2,24,7,0,6,9,172,50,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042387270947212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05430374115485154,0.14380027296830045,0.06697221951171951,0.11288226366753668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032900313436666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054965665214051836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754059863849838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042150662073977184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453579275115776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033341855690783836,0.061219278189351974,0.03626878830903716,0.0535268438254692,0.0,0.07035869388359531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035041142853412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338488411780115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933758003458085,0.0,0.0,0.062355725730787424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519503833043462,0.0,0.08519695986515498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6431273274318464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28391789360477354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17297675902923546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848562931934185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4278346922619035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459889764019073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383447491147021,0.07263795073326555,0.0,0.0,0.0630117910410983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050750002906282975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814422152137626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266102247712536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05875430831604615,0.0,0.0,0.04239731536105164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442465096073134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531175532136906,0.0,0.10131025387548412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338663635476188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066782295255013,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,poppingcandytreats,2020/01/02,"I got high with a group of friends on NYE and instead of feeling chill and relaxed, it felt as though I'd entered a movie and my friends were all actors playing a part. So, this has never happened to me before. I know weed can alter your mental state and be a poor choice for people with mental issues but I never really suffered from anything that detrimental. 

This time, I completely separated from reality and it felt as though the people around me were playing rehearsed parts. I should also state that I'd only met some of these people once before, others never and had only one close friend there who was the one that invited me. They were having conversations that, in my mind, were about me but not in a direct sense. They never spoke my name or directly to me but it felt as though every conversation was a thinly veiled jab at my personality. It was as though they were trying to ruin me and tear down every aspect of myself. It changed slowly but divulged into me sitting there thinking these guys had rehearsed dialogue and that this was a game they played to mess with people that were brought into the group. 

 This experience was extremely damaging to my mind and I won't be doing weed for a long time, but I just don't know what actually happened. This whole experience just made me feel absolutely insane and question my whole goddamn life.
 What happened to me?",6.722166988416992,7.411856899613903,6.851310328185327,74.77379946911199,64.94594594594594,9.100482625482623,30.85931467181468,9.017664075816787,2.5930944015444006,1103,38,191,17,16,354,137,259,0.087,0.831,0.08199999999999999,-0.7439,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,4,0,13,11,0,0,11,0,22,1,0,1,5,46,38,26,0,1,9,0,6,0,3,2,1,1,0,2,22,17,0,0,9,6,1,2,7,4,0,2,21,7,28,7,30,13,6,23,1,3,0,0,20,11,0,3,7,153,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.09559978210366472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834263552263139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061691001132572,0.0872096870406374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16672212764668232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363406022525527,0.0,0.1027145178494395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507960269798566,0.0,0.0,0.19165728382196345,0.0,0.0,0.099068171437366,0.0,0.2821855065068605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270627230685601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835162019640407,0.0,0.0,0.09700082684062712,0.2598905783197292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350548097326834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225008674735106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767808702720852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919563003165123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669600907961207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269692318078077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19745150904318956,0.0,0.19783359920109575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022268224745345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432960822536533,0.13276734109600613,0.14901370886059184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21217326038502984,0.0,0.2716665937289355,0.08553932528016588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097433049755312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275893593573735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277206475534372,0.3850007573236681,0.0,0.11424844673363968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651185570124024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187490166315668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BeamerBena,2020/01/02,"Help? Background Information: I’m a 16 year old female diagnosed with MDD, anxiety, & ADHD. I've been taking meds for about 4-5 years and most of them haven't been effective. My anxiety isn't as bad as it was a couple years ago thanks to Lexapro but the depression is what's really affecting me. I've been on so many SSRIs and none of them work on me. I’m currently on Celexa and Adderall.

So after quite some time, I noticed that I've been having the feeling of depersonalization and derealization. Like whenever I do stuff, I constantly feel like a spectator. I feel as though I can't control the stuff I do because everything is planned ahead of time (a sense of being on autopilot). My surroundings, as well as myself, just don't seem real to me. Should I tell my psychiatrist?",2.9104824561403504,5.3403678552631595,4.742263157894737,79.11150877192982,77.6842105263158,8.790175438596492,26.580701754385963,9.3871,2.7054117543859637,622,25,118,18,15,211,96,152,0.065,0.8190000000000001,0.11599999999999999,0.7549,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,6,6,6,0,0,7,0,16,1,0,3,0,19,24,13,0,1,2,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,6,0,0,0,5,2,1,0,5,3,16,4,21,17,3,16,0,1,0,0,5,5,0,3,13,78,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890822914606541,0.0,0.13946517886765886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17046897748980244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407168462774473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13136551046974526,0.09590802631461844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17001982047648126,0.17646103114981532,0.0,0.17408468292801754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550967894478366,0.15968850071574922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413997084825903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386551092059044,0.1123978943602874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545621258765964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372877488595946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950978648189815,0.0,0.0,0.17476020076154306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791233369357223,0.16509329476902124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16734177288071928,0.0,0.17907807255201652,0.10079080221279177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322899361339922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602146195262139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829395973144065,0.0,0.1375149584712141,0.14485001546919946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545777290700052,0.0,0.18348291643504047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14146021445866647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453944969300955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30394963023923083
mentalhealth,meegz86,2020/01/02,"Thinking of admitting myself into the hospital Hello,

I have struggled with anxiety and depression for the majority of my life.

Lately, my anxiety has been going to the extreme. It’s been manifesting as health anxiety. It’s gotten to the point where I don’t want to do anything. 

I’ve also developed an alcohol problem over the past three years to help with anxiety.

I need advice on how to tell this to my husband. He’ll think I’m over-reacting, but I need the help and can’t continue on the path I’m currently on.",3.3941804180418025,5.547840475247528,5.727260726072612,73.98899889989,74.94059405940594,10.033443344334431,31.024202420242023,10.25414643259724,3.8883852585258527,412,20,73,14,9,145,65,101,0.11800000000000001,0.8140000000000001,0.068,-0.1901,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,8,0,7,3,0,1,0,14,18,6,0,4,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,3,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,3,0,8,0,17,14,1,13,0,1,0,0,7,7,0,0,5,50,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18559529755225504,0.0,0.2029751116402336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15188523357801725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5811771436908687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629443821648098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635845794955784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794037443635328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018844238571265,0.0,0.0,0.2546092696209239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21424688825357432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415165777642715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28165818943964915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18130762426818328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795432090089601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18173530279413566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19855382729903875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600531291223627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24339619554375624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202436719808942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223073088153878
mentalhealth,exer240,2020/01/02,"In need of quick advice So yeah to start off with I’m suffering from ocd and what I need help with is what this that happened to me was and if it could be a different form of my ocd.

I fall asleep 22.30 and then wake up about 23.30 with the feeling like I have to make a quota go even which was a bet from the money me and my family saw that night. I know this sounds super weird but that was what happened, and this felt so important and so real even tho I realised it was crazy that I started to think I had a psychosis or something. The problem was that couldn’t make this quota go even and therefore my world would end.

I manage to sit through the worst of the feeling like everything is going down because this quota and fall asleep pretty stable (still something feels off) 

I now 10 minutes ago woke up 1.20 am, and have a similar feeling but now the problem is that I owe someone a large portion of money and again since I can’t do anything about this the feeling a get is that my world will go under. As I write this I have calmed down.

Sorry if this is totally impossible to understand... but Is this psychosis or my ocd or something else?

Thanks anyone that answers me!",3.974621848739496,5.061707218487399,4.446470588235297,88.11911764705883,71.35294117647058,7.112605042016808,27.02521008403361,7.285733465282438,1.2489092436974794,930,31,192,9,17,294,121,238,0.083,0.7759999999999999,0.141,0.8895,2,0,3,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,14,10,0,0,14,1,23,3,3,3,1,45,50,24,0,9,8,0,6,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,23,13,0,0,10,0,4,6,2,5,0,0,9,8,21,5,27,36,4,28,0,1,1,0,2,10,0,6,13,142,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049524628912507,0.11837651682462005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337534901416188,0.0,0.10989330806152378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140568264299045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662205246039293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13952248531246336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155682009866008,0.0,0.1182781662618272,0.0,0.0,0.26460878100584234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001852438069226,0.0,0.12589107800907204,0.0,0.33761307278239844,0.1908042041865956,0.12822081948108638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697699423663213,0.0,0.3035789361558887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361806836933277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951007860886673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339093738208388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13048330095345387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828002840347934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980387180334003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531968793234655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585975414002224,0.0,0.2555624351513781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199950726403255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046694098174432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131493125753452,0.3084204027491005,0.0,0.149488819623501,0.18904277717607612,0.0,0.10664644549084464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229471071736632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855680259742998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390214516197652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094864077760792,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyyii,2020/01/02,"I need advice My (m/17) gf (18) wants to reparty New year's with her best friend and wants to drink alcohol and stuff...the problem is, she always changes very hard when she drunk and im so damn scared everytime and now im crying and i dont know what to do. Also she is always drinking when she is with him and It always ends the same damn way but i dont want to get hurt again...",-0.04481029810298054,1.9615231097561008,1.6340650406504054,99.57502710027106,86.1951219512195,4.620054200542006,16.428184281842814,5.82211442006289,-0.7619880758807587,293,6,71,2,9,95,54,82,0.226,0.72,0.055,-0.8947,0,0,3,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,2,1,1,0,6,4,0,0,0,16,12,11,0,5,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,8,4,0,1,3,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,1,10,2,6,12,2,8,0,1,0,0,8,0,2,0,7,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547642712241685,0.0,0.16925695663598622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266541113618255,0.3953473089184985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16620699760592608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754197401051055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396980988574365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.371233568355522,0.3102985306107036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402751036822113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236175624249584,0.0,0.0827454990946732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187477508487334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954596347472953,0.0,0.3421488959182102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703991341746944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11743461444833482,0.0,0.15296159215765234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15154549745377566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585631083516704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18130389056136528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067769585799452,0.28024475475537663,0.12571237183196365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198966118133106
mentalhealth,SamLew68,2020/01/02,"I've (18m) just cut myself for the first time in a year It's a throwaway account for reasons of I don't want anyone I know to find this. To anyone who I do know seeing this, it isn't who you think.

  


I was doing so well. The past few months I've felt pretty good. Stable almost. Happy. I went out in the sun or in the rain and enjoyed myself. I made some more friends and kept constant contact with my older ones. I was social and reasonably happy.

The past 2 weeks was different. I don't know what happened I just spiralled. I haven't seen my friends for a month now. I haven't left my room for anything other than the occasional babysitting job since the Christmas holidays began. The girl I really like who really liked me started pursuing another girl really hard

I feel adrift, afloat, unable to stand up in waist deep water. I feel like I'm drowning. I've listened to the same album for 3 weeks on repeat because the songs speak to me. I've spoken to no one about it because I don't want them to know.

I have a craft knife. I have several I use for small craft work for school or for hobbies. I used one on my arm. One little scratch. I'm not letting it get further than that for now. Not like the first time i ever cut myself and had scratches all the way up my arm

I just wanted to feel something. I can't cry, I don't know why. I can't talk to her, she can't call rn. I can't speak to anyone else, they're all asleep.

  


Sorry for how incoherent this writing has been. It's very raw.",0.684869909502261,2.8547712916666685,2.511900452488689,93.39780542986428,84.48076923076924,5.0808446455505285,19.753393665158374,6.37848985222837,0.06170972850678736,1161,33,253,11,34,384,166,312,0.04,0.8079999999999999,0.152,0.9882,3,0,1,0,0,2,36.0,0,1,1,3,10,13,2,0,16,0,22,5,4,6,3,41,49,8,1,3,7,0,7,4,2,0,0,4,1,2,14,6,2,1,13,2,1,1,14,2,1,6,11,13,39,11,34,37,6,37,0,0,2,0,19,15,0,4,23,155,53,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300236144523467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786074624980772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21577244773399915,0.10539522303044836,0.0846474232595197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540856938356146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503454777731254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115827982352887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129900936740134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074698639688984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592877523616553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930454051968354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603175756849144,0.07348529458425435,0.09876453961347327,0.0,0.09401485045715714,0.17499030389425702,0.0,0.0,0.15894328227451118,0.0,0.05374163310260808,0.0,0.0,0.08627654167443675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909613453765505,0.2189989940072931,0.09214497697817554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207558162407417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826538689924674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176086961084096,0.10518431057756783,0.0,0.2010145185168639,0.10309567448699168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733138730120497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16420841164991815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788103219340902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963886032892568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464857519974163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19768987223858292,0.211520438575735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410277227209792,0.08196843397595244,0.0,0.0,0.1162058271328181,0.0,0.08508927499235057,0.0,0.0,0.10485579879074264,0.0,0.07918890553602119,0.0,0.1151466236702259,0.07280690815504286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267732319936688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659104092860056,0.0,0.0,0.11996039820983527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17768108238272684,0.0,0.08487268627698265,0.18201365577313175,0.08164780244690018,0.16502086860158388,0.0,0.0924861234332853,0.09535496254821364,0.0928177910274604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488543491063017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624035157725278
mentalhealth,rcovr,2020/01/02,"Bad day Having a really bad day, very stuck in my head.

I’ve been trying to gather the strength to write something more substantial about my mental health issues and journey for a few weeks, but I just don’t have the courage yet. This is what I’ve got for now. 

Just wanted to say thanks to the people on here for sharing, listening, and supporting. It gives me hope.",4.675416666666667,5.745592375000001,4.776,86.46900000000002,69.69444444444444,7.982222222222222,25.511111111111113,8.238735603445708,1.4146244444444442,289,8,58,4,5,90,56,72,0.07400000000000001,0.655,0.271,0.9578,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,5,0,5,2,1,0,0,8,13,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,2,4,6,10,10,2,8,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,5,37,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3972461601745169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3068308099271567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281998671445267,0.0,0.0,0.1902574476267706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441374617462388,0.2528594108304748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362723403878564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482889374259516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23973097203633556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649187106749142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523944870185773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891747871475632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18313461129905925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699477763103964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190114903089846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150752046884678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962790911938038,0.14031005932588564,0.0,0.19081607722080052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NutterBanger,2020/01/02,"Help my life sucks Damn this going to be a long one get popcorn so some back story atm as of 2nd of January I am 13 but I'm February 14th I am going to be 14 let's get into why my life is shit. So this all started when I started year 4 in primary school or what ever it was called I was like 9. And yeah I'm British so I was always a ""weird"" kid I was not weird I think I just liked playing games and I had so much energy I was the kinda kid to be will you be my friend I did not know how to speak new to ppl I blame my mom and dad now I know how to do this. I played and I was in school I was happy and all but then I don't remember but I was bullied for some reason and I was that kid that would not fight back I would tell the teachers and I was a slow runner so a If a kid you know beat me up and I fought back they would run like fucking sonic to the teacher and they them i did it but I did not I would tell them so but they did not believe me since I was a bigger kid so basically there was a unwitten rule that if you ran to the teach first you are telling the ""truth"" yeah I know retarded system so the teachers saw that i was getting bullied and they told me I had indoor play time or what ever it was called they basicly gave me tests to see if I was autistic or retarded and that's why school was so easy they gave the tard better marks and I wanted to play outside but they gave me bullshit excuses and blah blah so yeah I was socially isolated by the school. Also I remember this girl coming into my tard room where they gave mey tests she seemed depressed. OK ff i was ten getting bullied alot and this one polish kid like teased me for the last time I socked him right in the eye so I got expelled and I did not go to the school disco and I had a crush on a girl I was going to ask out but fuck it. So yeah I did not go to school ever since I want to go to school bad I have not been going 3 years and now it's 4 haha I'm sad. OK let's get on the part where I have bad insomia because of my loud ass grand dad ok me and my mom went to visit grand dad and grandma and aunt they live in Berlin my fav city because I have some good friends there ok my grand dad works as security in this company securitas security services yeah he works in like 4am till like 11 pm rough hours and he is like 50 something he is super loud when he is awake like smashing dishes coughing Loud so me and my mom did not sleep until like 5 am to get peace and quiet we developed bad insomnia and we start to sleep at like 4 or 3 am and we wake up at like 1 pm so I have like 11 hours a day yeah I can't break the cycle and I am a fat lard like 89 kg at 13 years old phat help me I want a girlfriend because when I had one I woke up earlier and and sleeped earlier I want someone to cuddle with anyone know how to help me sorry for the shitty spelling wrote this on my phone at 2 am",-0.6651229035974922,1.2678504252336469,1.7535701788076636,98.154356036359,88.3613707165109,4.88852473008151,17.517261980967017,6.265235699118849,-0.42681473136175496,2231,56,553,22,73,757,255,642,0.14300000000000002,0.631,0.226,0.9952,0,0,1,0,1,0,11.0,3,4,11,6,34,49,8,0,27,11,60,16,8,4,6,93,108,68,0,11,24,8,1,15,3,5,5,5,1,8,19,36,2,2,10,6,1,13,11,15,0,5,43,9,92,34,51,54,8,70,0,2,3,4,67,24,6,13,44,347,111,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049136624360789284,0.05112620506749255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04296296831134062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057441705106585875,0.0,0.0,0.14173958301988607,0.15390914382281753,0.11236680132430052,0.0,0.0,0.06922617765327467,0.0,0.05434209182812405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548208064031588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05292843585754127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0396261998971486,0.0,0.05292149766332038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673843918775005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226410711808553,0.0,0.0,0.09494273163289003,0.11360769780467328,0.1926112526238825,0.0,0.2444396900849728,0.05153618589719723,0.049142259562327095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06540812048915916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235535517056573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101962995556782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688396643426648,0.050084938260753366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256609984171448,0.08679921622731734,0.3902386967316055,0.0,0.054256044938646934,0.054375873409235435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21588688226864414,0.0,0.0,0.04516829930786305,0.0,0.0,0.05934285286647395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447498423274027,0.0,0.1249078280931207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653770150438368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317451089214009,0.0,0.0,0.13920780776669126,0.052472711871987585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4352911931879908,0.04896279300377277,0.05593617304576324,0.0,0.0,0.06307122868712263,0.10165397473651444,0.0,0.18446467097039035,0.06263426690502079,0.05206117441003884,0.04730247733039563,0.0,0.06878135919374302,0.1304708190821077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611138985069398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0393707378575929,0.0,0.0,0.07165680569085278,0.0,0.0,0.05871223145261445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496469789975228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05695906419903564,0.11088703464746597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946370866625017,0.0,0.0,0.17459179150605675,0.0,0.0,0.11870347396385555
mentalhealth,tattooguy382919,2020/01/03,How do i deal with this? I have people telling me to stop faking being depressed and having issues when I’m not at all. They just don’t understand my issues because I don’t talk about them. It makes me feel even worse that people close to me think I’m lying and make fun of me to other people,3.944516129032259,4.292362322580647,4.919516129032257,87.39927419354844,70.93548387096773,6.845161290322581,21.951612903225808,5.985473137389443,0.2811161290322577,232,4,49,1,4,76,45,62,0.221,0.73,0.049,-0.8885,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,2,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,3,1,14,13,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,10,1,7,12,1,4,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,35,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437796441946581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24316397110906005,0.20314810107445236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15578501462710095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925921116097472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4923585248301437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148802174324985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4905522610869832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971916844489316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18957741358510244,0.20615429761399115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511312224108405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455412718172919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403641270540909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwwwwdatmush,2020/01/03,What does an American do if they are too mentally ill to work and doesn't want to be homeless? 4 years of this. I'm sick of losing job after job because of my mental health. I heard applying for disability is hard. But I can't do this anymore,1.3094117647058852,3.3191007254901983,3.6585882352941184,86.99964705882354,80.96078431372548,7.217254901960787,23.925490196078428,8.238735603445708,1.4994596078431377,191,7,41,4,5,66,41,51,0.221,0.779,0.0,-0.8527,2,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,0,0,4,10,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,7,8,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,26,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595584747359566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15954365697970807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290351955323188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23445202623188785,0.0,0.0,0.2781988663389213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5194385570519134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29280062360641057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5275096104020369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15437076006863715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905371570521068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16854076212182298
mentalhealth,PikSylBits,2020/01/03,Is there something wrong with my brain? Lately I've been having more excessive thoughts of worry and when I feel like I'm not worried anymore I feel like my head and parts of my body starts feeling physically strained making me scared to sleep. What should I do? I have an appointment scheduled so I recently have just been dreading rather or not that will actually get my mind straight. Any tips to help me sleep as well would be appreciated just seriously feel like something bad would happen if I didn't open up about it.,6.992121212121212,7.588419676767678,6.339949494949495,78.99659090909091,64.35353535353535,9.42828282828283,33.671717171717184,9.2995712137729,2.8367292929292938,424,17,80,7,6,130,74,99,0.175,0.6409999999999999,0.184,-0.3964,0,0,2,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,8,10,0,3,1,0,13,5,5,1,0,21,23,7,0,5,7,0,4,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,6,1,0,4,4,12,4,8,14,2,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,8,52,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.15332608776105894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684673184371664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15582044721301436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118832273420467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17452448162853146,0.0,0.1753974624089863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31777761023894485,0.3367388712742469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208851840716698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389403641684508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612500627268729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053139716947474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723777896082055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23028213487494384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487856874233002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586460299684647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014524105854642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15513667315690294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730415286674648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144661868326861,0.0,0.0,0.2419167246862698,0.0,0.0,0.111210078205906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473543062937373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126941083769026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191252088712599,0.0,0.2232265451090492,0.1717856432491549,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iityzax,2020/01/03,"I shouldn't really be like this So, through high school I was seeing this girl. It was good for a time but things went bad. To cut a long story short, she used to mentally abuse me, physically hurt me, cheated on me, anything you can thinking to bring me down to a point where I felt like I was worthless to everyone. My father had left me, my mother had left with her husband, my auntie couldn't deal with me, and my grandmother ended up having to put up with me. This has affected me so much in recent years, keeping it locked up in the back of my mind trying to keep positive. Recently I've gotten a new girlfriend, (somehow) and she is the greatest person in the world, but my issues etc keep getting in the way, I feel like I'm going to lose her. We talked and she says she is here for me but she has her own problems with out me burdening her. 
What do I do? What is the point?",3.3046323841903917,4.261646790055252,4.4433149171270765,88.00473438164049,72.8121546961326,7.558181045473863,24.97280067998301,7.882392219407189,1.174430174245643,683,20,148,9,13,224,108,181,0.22,0.72,0.06,-0.9867,0,0,0,0,1,0,23.0,1,1,0,1,6,12,2,0,9,0,17,0,0,2,0,25,31,8,0,3,3,3,2,3,1,1,0,1,0,2,8,9,0,3,3,0,0,4,2,8,0,0,8,4,33,4,26,20,4,31,0,3,1,0,20,18,0,1,11,109,41,1,0.0,0.1658287754583117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517450307926473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761999196567748,0.11686009277543898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442917981011453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396231640152255,0.0,0.15609151372688174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373702128778372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07076758098683668,0.09998688632761228,0.1343827884395153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731229096990255,0.0,0.07954204340065778,0.11739114354710377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14787458779307822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14982922711979912,0.0,0.0,0.14608105085252454,0.0,0.3732065250469112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041321785229294,0.0,0.0,0.20513099859150535,0.0,0.0,0.12385949502774228,0.0,0.15657855383497662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410459631428779,0.0,0.14131890243106288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288612196496028,0.0,0.0,0.13517347545352135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222069821516926,0.0,0.0,0.2646133811904638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13392206037608773,0.0,0.14069766126797387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966145265511266,0.0,0.2763856666529633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130117993903926,0.0,0.1416461907984223,0.1115293683828009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249391001798673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298267893002216,0.08968020933127367,0.0,0.0,0.08161133984344092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502311522723833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208798187942182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109310493132027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974358822431473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012914135986858
mentalhealth,CombatWombat288,2020/01/03,"I’ve had the worse day of my life.. please send me some positivity 😭❤️ I just feel like I need to get today off my chest. Christ, I can barely see my screen through my tears. Two major things happened today, and I just can’t ever remember feeling this awful.
1) This morning, at the job that I absolutely detest, that I struggle to get myself out of bed in the mornings for, I was attacked. I work in care and I know this happens, but today it was bad. I ended up stood in the bathroom, staring in the mirror and trying not to cry while blood poured out of my mouth. I’m a young woman, and I was attacked by a grown man. It isn’t the first time it’s happened, not even the first time in the last month, but today it was particularly bad. I got into the office, I sat down and just broke down in tears. I told my boss that I hate my job and that I struggle going to work every day. Now I feel week for crying in front of my boss
2) I finished work and went to visit my grandad who I’m very close to. He’s in hospital currently for the third time over the past few weeks. My nana, putting on a brave face, said he kept getting chest infections. Today when I was visiting him, a hospice nurse arrived and my nana broke down and told me that my grandad has lung cancer. This was just the final straw today. I managed to keep a brave face for my grandparents, but to know that my grandad is seriously ill, to see my nana so fragile and broken and afraid.. 
I got home and just cried, and I haven’t stopped crying since. I know nothing anyone can say will change things, but some positivity would be really appreciated right now ❤️
Thank you for taking the time to read this long post 😞",3.0343545150501683,4.227648539130435,4.223840579710147,88.41368729096992,73.7536231884058,6.814938684503902,23.993868450390192,7.1686216300943375,0.7624269788182838,1306,37,285,13,26,428,178,345,0.18899999999999997,0.721,0.09,-0.9903,4,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,0,5,11,16,3,3,18,1,17,11,7,2,1,45,49,20,0,2,11,0,4,1,0,2,4,2,2,2,18,17,0,3,7,1,0,8,5,11,0,4,16,10,43,5,40,30,4,61,1,2,4,0,14,21,0,2,32,174,61,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05886604167970722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915514693696088,0.0,0.0,0.14058653194081913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858350356757651,0.0,0.08905949084989605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3699052200663592,0.10858828551370044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456537018043248,0.0,0.0,0.05560522377679508,0.07615265189707239,0.07093182171011245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277035883057861,0.06014375504292897,0.0,0.0922235798136406,0.0,0.14322013719679624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13195389507043453,0.0,0.0478458460865388,0.0,0.13466529028755886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233408836007332,0.0,0.0,0.08311798697797777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444719100889526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167086729713628,0.0748299523642815,0.0,0.0,0.1388021793050958,0.06862426361739139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05946430706528321,0.04112988874219278,0.0,0.0,0.07450352143461236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719786960190857,0.0,0.0,0.06242415987211916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807804296039206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803667462740421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241288317678893,0.0,0.0,0.08062860575491472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463195510146751,0.0,0.0,0.08421054587225353,0.0,0.05393283702838001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536832458538072,0.0718958900074031,0.08008184186175622,0.06694948855902028,0.0,0.0,0.13417349531476205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696409879129327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703847399376147,0.0,0.1760226589994765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329872083137199,0.0,0.0,0.07750878161843999,0.0,0.0,0.1118612184097625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19636224759260806,0.0,0.478800935704201,0.1608900315617124,0.0,0.057157965164725565,0.0,0.08223921194759272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06946372171680666,0.0,0.0,0.13506069145256785,0.0,0.0,0.07804290017578923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18386908342801372,0.0,0.08579452333556871,0.05980457170261098,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ivantofu,2020/01/03,"Don't know what to do anymore Hey everyone. I suffer from OCD, and I just got over my existential obsessions.
Yesterday I was thinking about my OCD, and somehow I ended up with the thought that music could be controlled by the government and that I shouldn't it. Sounds like a conspiracy theory.
I know it's fucking stupid and crazy, but yet this thought scares me a lot.
Any advice?",3.4630528375733864,5.928560315068495,4.318238747553817,82.67739726027398,75.98630136986301,8.007045009784736,28.23679060665361,8.841846274778883,2.4805749510763206,305,13,57,7,7,98,55,73,0.21100000000000002,0.789,0.0,-0.8941,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,2,2,4,0,6,1,0,1,0,17,13,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,1,9,1,7,6,1,5,0,1,0,1,1,2,1,2,4,41,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650581906965126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844563996361276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690028809177296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042251536954309,0.2165676460802661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24024320915722006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591869215579613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25076230906881336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21693999119487847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29813912198635123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251696383714648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306034220868696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715642976151303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738033130798436,0.0,0.4306776266139819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kix2Sophus,2020/01/03,Chemical Imbalance Manic Episodes If i have a family member that needs help and that family member thinks they’re fine how can I legally get her seen for a mental evaluation against her will? It’s my younger sister I’m tired of seeing her with this chemical imbalance it’s been a stressful two months,4.679999999999996,7.083174894736848,5.41740350877193,76.52715789473685,71.98245614035088,9.472280701754386,28.94385964912281,9.888512548439397,3.2733607017543864,247,10,42,7,5,80,44,57,0.113,0.78,0.107,-0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,4,1,0,1,0,6,10,3,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,6,1,4,7,0,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,1,1,26,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5655899893575765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15672747260772013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20107066048054864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.302309869996865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23944163819587036,0.0,0.0,0.22243180016463787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390456848629029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3436267426144743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19221544395968032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3447835495429524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29303743927188003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FucktheDeciders,2020/01/03,"I have NO control over my life 18m, a senior in HS. Fluctuates between meh and suicidal every single day. I don't have the opportunities that literally every single person from my town has. College in my house is taboo, my dad picks everything for me without my consent or opinion, its his way or nothing. Just found out he registered me for I think its called FAFSA and he filled out my application and enrolled me into a college under a major I don't want. He never asked me what I want to do or if I'm even going to college. He just picked these things and made me a computer science major. I'm retarded, I can't even do basic algebra and he's making me a computer major? I literally want to go to med school IF I go to college and he's choosing my life for me. I'm not even allowed to talk about college bc he shuts the conversation down. Hell I'm not even allowed to be alive like the other kids because I was born unlikeable. I was born with anxiety, crooked teeth, ugly face, and borderline mentally and thus meant to die young. I can't even have a relationship with a girl anymore because after a few days they learn who I am. If everyone has a problem with you, and you meet them at different times, and they don't know each other, there's not a problem with them, it's you. I need to die. I want to live but I'm not allowed to.",2.36198296836983,4.182803781021903,4.49534671532847,83.16752128953772,76.88321167883211,7.486374695863748,27.110097323600968,8.344100000000001,1.951640389294404,1052,43,212,20,24,363,142,274,0.122,0.8640000000000001,0.013999999999999999,-0.9512,4,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,3,4,2,9,5,1,0,13,0,17,4,2,9,1,57,37,17,3,10,14,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,10,18,0,2,6,0,0,4,12,3,0,0,5,0,36,2,32,31,7,25,1,0,0,0,26,11,1,7,10,143,46,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988151338450799,0.0,0.12810249802318066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075704785513006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15748236326049572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318975959081217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487577983147978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16660866554771855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681173201783693,0.13495575494001766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4265797220716424,0.0,0.21766355558674846,0.1234280168050226,0.1160901809361359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162886476375142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22023183801370555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904549704425754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098876813994033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182473989730994,0.06310621670694201,0.0,0.114059981383371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222431821812613,0.08622235967929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434793858103385,0.0,0.13017355509674391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577834224962516,0.09962430805858566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394264735842578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278676092427704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471975846253265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13868085333896346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072751471422306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14129164027912294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038224126906817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581518824809609,0.0827672867081383,0.0,0.0,0.07532039915858939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30475259968523793,0.1025295874721091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451582171918164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lemonoflove,2020/01/03,"Schizophrenic neighbor, need help Apologies if I say anything insensitive.

I'm not really sure if this is the place to post this, but I live nextdoor to my neighbor in a semi-detached. She is around 65 and 110% schizophrenic. She screams (not exaggerating) about all manor of things and often gets stuck on words and keeps repeating them like a broken record, she will also cut off midway through sentences very abruptly. This yelling will often go on until late at night, 1-2am.

She has lived alone for many years and has no living relatives which makes it tricky to get her help.
These bouts of shouting have gotten progressively worse over the last 6 years and now occur more than once a day for anywhere between half an hour and 4ish hours.

We have talked to the police etc and they say unless she is directly harming us or herself they can't do anything.

I have been diagnosed with depression and I think the major factor in this has not been being able to sleep properly since I was 14 as I was listening to the ravings of a mad woman.

Really at a loss of what to do about this, she is a recluse and won't talk to us or anyone else for that matter. Need some advice. Based in the UK. Think she might have been sectioned around 25 years ago.",7.272349533311875,6.945714200836817,6.638577405857742,80.21227228838106,63.89539748953975,9.696942388155776,31.773736723527517,9.057496981413335,2.455685934985516,990,32,191,14,13,305,156,239,0.171,0.785,0.043,-0.9872,0,1,0,0,1,0,23.0,3,0,3,2,8,8,2,0,13,0,24,4,1,1,2,36,37,18,0,4,9,0,0,1,2,4,3,6,2,1,11,13,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,6,0,1,7,6,22,2,35,25,6,29,0,2,0,0,26,13,0,8,15,133,33,0,0.12446805823593067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162874596898013,0.110333423653259,0.0,0.0,0.12891137073010225,0.0,0.09953706120220293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703096034506515,0.1275322346173244,0.20485321312458926,0.22160592118148134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027160057663044,0.0,0.10720415617377474,0.12633245907742674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397709126372896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388147865783559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005884639724025,0.0,0.07073806586300706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166856631522961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451519303627191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106329291219176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145807999271936,0.14040539113714118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06080880612960767,0.0,0.32972272734859204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308339538279565,0.12619107501700072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204094026418056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18458297610580668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680484095691912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325544198232921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004262918077325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920599364086165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594748505854402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19796399138252596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296126399018564,0.0,0.12455794757902272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173096718684012,0.0,0.0,0.20008542088758385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269104721310634,0.1595082118353383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29943949742005715,0.0,0.0,0.10269918339421984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12684358494611767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404600459750548
mentalhealth,t00wasted,2020/01/03,"im afraid of a guy thats actually a really nice person. soo there is that guy that i’ve known for a while and we never really spoke much except when i bought weed from him
one day i met him at a party and we got drunk and talked the whole night through
we ended up cuddling till we fell asleep and i felt comfortable 
but since then i always try to find excuses for not meeting him bc im scared 
i don’t even know why bc as i said he’s a really nice guy and i liked him but my anxiety is fucking everything up
at first i was afraid to meet him at his place bc we’d be alone and im afraid to spend time with people that i don’t know that well 
but as time went by it got so bad that i won’t even go to places where he’s going to be 
and i don’t fucking know why, i actually like him!
its just that i start to panic as soon as he texts me and asks me if i wanna come over or something 
idk what to do about it and its freaking me out 
i need advice how to get over that reasonless fear",0.3504054054054073,1.7953239954954938,2.611972972972976,96.10633783783784,81.56756756756756,6.241801801801803,17.406306306306305,7.1686216300943375,-0.20182774774774792,765,14,195,10,20,261,125,222,0.13699999999999998,0.775,0.08800000000000001,-0.9168,0,1,1,0,0,0,3.0,5,0,0,1,11,16,2,6,6,0,11,5,1,1,1,34,31,24,0,3,8,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,0,4,13,16,1,0,6,1,2,5,6,10,1,2,9,3,31,6,31,18,2,29,0,0,0,3,27,11,2,2,15,123,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.2276595248880541,0.0,0.0,0.11398521414852142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081017593158165,0.0,0.0,0.09705889547087188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923394349899677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904835287987473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739461712175457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048028240218836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522708146728184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331381788864692,0.0,0.0,0.15408729143386776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483398891797643,0.0,0.0,0.1312592865645217,0.0,0.0,0.11199854387391976,0.0,0.1066124177253746,0.09921910892772433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156748706725589,0.06094277031467527,0.0,0.13258532794383102,0.0,0.1865850761958885,0.0,0.0,0.3464939197508754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3779933979280129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19231692997129585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139747801159932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574830139126427,0.08649160152057189,0.08996465956686166,0.0,0.0,0.10946445845502664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904241288382682,0.0,0.0,0.13685905982823815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086771524910545,0.10185087101668598,0.243740685107246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22417942630010596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095714815433264,0.0,0.11678309029957737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649085527788713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979986284261338,0.0,0.0,0.08256270650619855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937557127888372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603455222510133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919504174155809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048788481534976,0.10813209881145627,0.2105099154282133,0.13023119953890172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,missymeaghan,2020/01/03,"I feel like 99.9% of people are actually very inconsiderate. I have always been so empathetic, even when I was very young. Always thinking about other people, how they must feel, or want something and I try to help. 
Now that I'm an adult, life ofcourse has completely changed, but my feelings haven't and I'm noticing. 
After all of my experience 
I have began to notice when people are doing certain things, and I realize they dont consider much. This has caused my mental illnesses to spiral. 
I realize that  people do things because of a mixture of things, including not be considerate enough most of the time, and they dont realize it ? Most days I feel like I'm the only person who cares. And it has started to make me angry.  Thoughts?",4.184328537170266,6.3910339496402875,5.396564748201438,77.0030965227818,72.81294964028775,8.086570743405275,28.130095923261393,8.841846274778883,2.478783693045564,585,23,102,12,12,194,87,139,0.09699999999999999,0.784,0.12,-0.1078,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,3,0,7,4,0,0,4,0,16,2,0,3,3,27,30,11,0,2,3,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,10,5,0,0,10,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,4,15,4,11,24,5,9,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,3,11,75,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.13663572691463893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330095829325068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535264670850988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427559658595897,0.14383532590136866,0.1481186969300677,0.0,0.14680444350622454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029894062199342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32819615935806995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14467428324914647,0.0,0.0924794562570006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13696282416785646,0.0,0.0,0.28318582575366924,0.20005536839312008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384998526280884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889766483399397,0.13680979909575508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934619782395224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110351443716526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292810281539616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.318819007797552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648871776891236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3882787355344198,0.12225684653516775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779140071006256,0.0,0.0,0.0991042691937584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790618565705016,0.08971680174415787,0.0,0.11115731500705243,0.0816446398977768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950618877177562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23105624895043425,0.08258525093190226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DamnFineCalamity,2020/01/03,"I want a new brain. Mine is defective. I feel like I'm getting worse every year. I can't think for myself anymore. I depend on validation. I'm tired of being medicated. I'm getting older, my parents are getting older, and it's terrifying. I am losing hope that happiness exists for me.",0.9941071428571426,3.5968430535714333,4.418571428571429,75.8514285714286,91.67857142857142,6.371428571428572,24.857142857142854,7.645422480735847,2.1202214285714285,225,10,38,5,8,82,43,56,0.247,0.585,0.16699999999999998,-0.7096,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,5,3,1,1,0,6,15,1,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,9,3,4,14,0,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,5,22,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24425434631804435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27494204575079995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20751066648787014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453205572776226,0.17595023493189246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38603041697761226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621811932811368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446223896773673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032527037505353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27553646627509715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481121237614645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378692410190532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734768462236258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15781323411629544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830751052183028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14526872655397546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25099142090460164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586032346733776
mentalhealth,wantSomeHeadLikeISIS,2020/01/03,Why am I easily getting mad? Like fr wtf? I’ve been getting mad at every little thing. I’m throwing stuff around my room and punching the fuck out of my walls. It all started last Tuesday. Not sure if it’s the all the clonozapem I took. Any help is appreciated,0.5736388140161708,3.0342619433962237,2.502479784366578,90.60660377358492,89.9433962264151,4.538005390835579,22.66576819407009,6.1826913282559595,0.4875466307277634,205,8,42,2,7,68,43,53,0.243,0.5920000000000001,0.165,-0.7288,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,3,8,9,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,2,0,4,2,4,7,2,11,0,0,0,1,1,6,1,1,4,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20089837177118255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262989890436706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489073639643283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27311462054385505,0.30869357264441977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19801640230959824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24080989532181826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14432918738228018,0.296092342605338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091025457736193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381896678614855,0.0,0.0,0.2784335146584059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19626650164155104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3282268053982029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665741052428069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SkitzAEnemia,2020/01/03,"Can I go to the doctor about paranoia? Hello, in recent months I've been occasionally experiencing some paranoia. When it happens it is the worst thing in the world. I have thought my best friend who I live with was trying to take over me and he was possessed. I've thought people wouldn't stop looking at me and licking there lips in this really creepy, suggestive way - as if they were craving to take over or kill me. I've thought police were after me, and had no reason to be worried if they would talk to me. I've had a really horrible dark past 2 - 3 months.
To add a bit more information, I do have a past that includes a fair amount of psychedelic drug use - I understand I may have brought this on myself and I can live with that, and I have learnt my lesson albeit too late. The very first time I had an intense paranoia experience I was on a lot of a psychedelic research chemical called '2-CB' some of you might be aware of. After that I stopped the psychedelics but it hasn't gone. 
If I should address the doctor, how do I go about this? 
Thanks so much!",4.264755134281201,5.3923061232227525,4.939601895734602,84.70235703001579,70.70616113744077,7.901548183254343,27.810742496050548,8.238735603445708,1.6789371879936814,836,29,173,12,15,269,123,211,0.08800000000000001,0.845,0.067,-0.2714,0,0,1,0,0,1,22.0,0,1,2,3,7,5,1,0,13,0,26,4,1,3,0,32,40,14,1,6,5,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,0,11,8,0,2,7,0,0,4,3,2,0,1,14,3,24,3,25,19,9,27,0,0,1,0,11,9,0,9,13,123,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477913714929594,0.0,0.15374881904623472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380217841793091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882889455682223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16331695677208385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775780775818985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978909527635115,0.0,0.0,0.1088041540600025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16007275869489218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245346402091058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15580644872563712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886127236277067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487092153622404,0.0,0.11826091087606108,0.0,0.0,0.11972779951604015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493973386951773,0.0,0.0,0.2248167656214454,0.0,0.10352553612052504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688744757517777,0.09763311272844052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804373569182994,0.1447956909930017,0.1390516707686845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23547873876989214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21177179826664733,0.11319303441986503,0.0,0.12965644367854853,0.0,0.0,0.09356054540991958,0.0,0.0,0.3354075412366929,0.08211853600317444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956136625607538,0.0,0.0,0.14660797985744992,0.0,0.12163105973695144,0.0,0.11619869303086568,0.0,0.11178352364399097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301870916451198,0.0,0.10004089757017344,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,just-me-i-guess,2020/01/03,"Should i find help So recently i just havent been feeling like myself, i dont like doing anything anymore, i completely disbanded my social network, i completely stopped my amatour gaming career by screaming to my team leader and not showing up to scrims and i just feel like i want to die. Like i cant kill myself because i dont have the balls for it but i am just done living. 

I have been doing more drugs then usual( mainly weed and XTC) and i just dont feel motivated to do anything. Ive stopped doing homework and barely go to classes. However i dont think im depressed since i can feel happy, i just dont have the urge to. I feel like everything i do is useless and that im just hurting everyone.

So my question is, should i find help or just sit it out and wait until i get better again?",2.0438008130081333,3.9727165914634166,3.9996097560975614,85.860837398374,78.20731707317074,6.568455284552847,26.17723577235773,7.554174236665415,1.4996996747967488,627,25,125,9,15,213,86,164,0.16699999999999998,0.6940000000000001,0.14,-0.1278,1,0,1,0,0,2,14.0,0,0,0,3,10,12,1,0,2,0,25,1,0,1,0,34,35,13,2,3,10,0,5,5,0,2,1,1,1,0,3,8,0,3,10,4,0,1,8,5,0,0,3,6,26,7,11,30,2,11,0,3,0,0,6,2,0,2,12,89,29,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10461247411109488,0.0,0.0,0.1736098342943741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06430249176937013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093292641723155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211973942062838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085381432449303,0.0,0.10947646083693204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794746778302104,0.6181363920656567,0.0,0.12232875849236292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079514772820992,0.0948028433101769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666811594594649,0.22607486426488865,0.0,0.0,0.192822202738957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05511140007799086,0.0,0.05994938378297306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229042065366383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140833676843886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292354903767528,0.0,0.22788314646113755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167031875588383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576724717854257,0.0,0.09314491937089864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816700112322764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415341179275224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725803079888242,0.0,0.0,0.10752836384076102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763798587385398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759033408102548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617649016986177,0.0,0.062217606871124084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SentientScribble,2020/01/03,"Is thinking and fantazising about suicide normal? Is thinking about and considering suicide normal? I often get into these terrible spins of dispair, where I start wanting to hurt and sometimes kill myself. I'm pretty sure I'm not depressed, just prone to stress. I have these two fantasies that i get frequently. I confessed this to my stepmum yesterday, and she told me it was completely normal. She explained is as the brain comforting itself with the thought ""even if everything goes wrong, I can always just kill myself""

I definetly recognize where she's coming from, but I'm not really sure what to think. She always messes with my head like this.",6.412461685823757,8.616402525862068,6.221149425287358,73.41657088122608,66.84482758620689,9.293486590038317,32.71647509578544,9.725611199111238,3.5982118773946343,527,23,80,12,9,165,76,116,0.159,0.731,0.11,-0.7277,0,0,0,0,0,4,15.0,0,0,0,0,8,12,2,1,2,0,6,2,2,0,2,27,20,7,4,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,6,1,0,1,2,8,0,1,3,0,16,4,12,17,0,7,1,2,0,0,7,3,0,2,4,59,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474732804923871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600686796358213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280984344105459,0.1559170947740293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808164245735607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821997074129493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364880683409416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538717207628736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15261690508270356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15919456701291276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32904586458326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265102439056728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4371056384522576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15128909583984532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526589976845216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707562398869792,0.0,0.10525600835603434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17034405932868746,0.0,0.0,0.3253239677406496,0.0,0.28031031604190604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858574865911375,0.0,0.1180572277299384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14209648949521972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452657222224972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771159842951506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625884217777624,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fistfulofbottlecaps,2020/01/03,"My uncle shot himself this morning. Definitely the worst thing I've ever had to do is tell my parents. My uncle was such a big personality and always had huge goals (which in hindsight may be how he coped in the past). I’m gonna get to the nuts of this. His big goals inspired a big goal for me and a year ago I started talking about riding my bike across the country and today as I’ve been processing and dealing with this abrupt change in my life I realized I want him with me. Not only that I want some good to come from it in his memory. So I guess my question is, how do I start down this road of turning my big adventure into a fundraiser that’s worthy of his memory? Is there particular charities I should get in contact with or certain ones I should avoid?",2.775961538461541,4.461474929487182,4.2938461538461565,85.65115384615386,75.34615384615384,7.107692307692307,25.461538461538463,7.882392219407189,1.3944769230769234,603,21,124,9,13,201,100,156,0.054000000000000006,0.792,0.154,0.9179,1,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,7,6,0,1,8,0,13,1,0,2,2,26,24,9,0,4,2,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,9,9,0,1,3,1,0,2,1,2,0,1,4,0,22,4,21,15,2,24,0,0,0,0,13,14,0,5,8,88,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19042096842951944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874369409640414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272463022406663,0.1850445214040897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214653350793608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19431290684782265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22446445205597565,0.0,0.0,0.18017703904961127,0.0,0.0,0.2366434779755711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15173053165848988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556453378751294,0.16337685818800166,0.0,0.0,0.23852717715172636,0.0,0.2050656896823168,0.0,0.1875685978512125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406425088156653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040950153805121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17266055177340772,0.18775820443669225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271386466040947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036199644189442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336575645622635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534074803905817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13833413093713426
mentalhealth,JustS0me0n3,2020/01/03,"I think I might have schizophrenia I'm a 17 yo boy from Portugal and I think I have schizophrenia. I just predict something bad and get so fixed to that idea that I don't know what is true or false anymore (even if it sounds crazy and impossible). For example, if some friend of mine calls me something like ""you're so stupid"" I will predict that I'm gonna be in a fight with him and my mind will go crazy for a while or for the whole day. I've passed through a situation that I don't wanna about and I know that the worst that could happen is impossible. Yet my mind thinks that the worst is the most possible ending. I just wanna know opinions and maybe make some friends which could help me through my situation. Please I'm losing my mind",3.774563515954245,4.940204662251656,3.9861529199277537,90.93360626128842,71.9139072847682,7.34521372667068,25.647802528597232,7.686295010490155,1.0264251655629142,588,18,131,7,11,182,87,151,0.162,0.733,0.106,-0.8687,0,0,2,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,7,10,2,0,8,0,13,0,0,1,1,34,27,13,0,6,6,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,0,1,10,7,0,0,7,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,0,1,18,4,13,20,6,7,0,1,0,0,7,1,0,9,5,85,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508772332363914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702653291708954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553470435646613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429351472938445,0.0,0.0,0.09811461477706056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13474662642203716,0.0,0.0,0.10048386130498692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350785481378736,0.0,0.07948436010337354,0.0,0.08646193712803397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453265027493552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197301416236734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17174211690261312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508285730511461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432557150475423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17020036823904727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155142383851284,0.0,0.15284025147695487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16139139989433066,0.4608395334572062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16699875848365187,0.0,0.17150957333699812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3420126662064909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342422111289237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29244626951960057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16985351186688194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fedcba6854,2020/01/03,"Lost interest in everything I'm constantly stressed and in my thoughts, even around other people most of the time. I feel like I don't enjoy anything anymore I even lost interest in sex which freaks me out even more and is a thought that always crosses my mind.",6.779533333333332,7.23693042,6.25,79.93833333333335,64.8,9.866666666666667,36.66666666666667,9.725611199111238,3.5030666666666668,211,10,39,4,3,65,39,50,0.19899999999999998,0.648,0.153,-0.1351,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,4,8,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,9,8,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,4,1,6,4,6,4,2,8,0,2,0,1,0,5,0,1,3,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183812074790125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219080091675103,0.0,0.0,0.18178739550944764,0.1966538021375944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23872166925243224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4377203851307458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985367020513975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169706740776914,0.15781579398772494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792385749514448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4822915271478231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230527983395461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314889430135792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530478838853183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35075049605087066,0.1288124760040445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cioudiesss,2020/01/03,"Imagine having your parents not wanting you... Kicked out

Hi there! 

To keep it brief my parents packed my bags and dropped me off at my uncle and aunts house for being “untolerable”

But, wait, wait how did we get here??

My parents genuinely hate me, they voice it all the time. We fight a ton, which of course I factor into. But, my parents blame it all on me, saying how much I ruin their lives. 

I want their love, I want their respect and I want to be back at home. I sent a long list of how and why I want to improve in details and sent it to them, but of course I get a long paragraph how it’s unfair for me to ask when I’m coming home. 

My argument is that it’s my life too, and them being not transparent causes me stress and makes my quality of life bad when I’m trying to get better by going to therapy twice a week where they don’t really seem to want their own daughter.

I love them, but they are making me so stressed and upset.",4.92102097902098,4.361001353846151,5.725687645687647,85.58643356643357,68.7948717948718,8.526806526806528,27.47086247086247,7.686295010490155,1.3475128205128202,724,19,161,7,11,238,110,195,0.154,0.74,0.105,-0.9374,5,0,0,0,1,0,23.0,2,2,10,1,12,11,2,3,5,0,8,4,0,7,2,39,33,19,0,6,6,6,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,8,13,0,3,2,0,0,5,3,7,0,1,3,2,37,4,22,27,5,21,0,1,0,2,28,8,0,1,7,112,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248794033622947,0.0,0.0,0.09252275112909764,0.1004666241215988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064179757889371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360725851115445,0.0,0.1036496170123339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18859505522197315,0.0,0.06838365764054362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879635182942948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24139223238786456,0.0,0.0,0.13883927502941076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695068145480864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997867730584645,0.0,0.0,0.10624947039113143,0.21296826034111413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171966153364682,0.0,0.16063618353586406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845296197604191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5344281553696005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708348716963351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568753150584587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953966085326752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756645167599514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376025007143176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016266724917666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169300035336602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42582598108679504,0.0,0.09651772139510753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857489444594706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Moomalicious,2020/01/03,"Psych/Mental Health/Meditation/Self Improvement - Workshops/Conferences/Events/Retreats?  I'm looking to work on my mental health and am looking for some events to attend anywhere in the US! Anyone have a comprehensive updated list where I can find these events to attend by date? I'm using [retreatfinder.com](https://retreatfinder.com) but looking for more sources on how to find events like this (:

​

Thanks!",11.766692307692313,13.677339476923079,8.356730769230769,64.09201923076925,54.23076923076921,10.192307692307693,37.78846153846154,10.125756701596842,4.107538461538463,346,14,46,6,4,97,48,65,0.0,0.754,0.24600000000000002,0.9491,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,2,0,7,10,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,10,10,2,11,0,0,3,0,1,4,0,1,6,26,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178512793521334,0.24431310705727705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14058766825515553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675352088536246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42744035451329054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822904664323973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5065259195675872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20262384409280834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20975217683102806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851114592743368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418535918647284,0.17365355953162118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14637599180416347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24431310705727705,0.0
mentalhealth,Bluepawsss,2020/01/03,"Dealing with Complicated Greif I'v only recently found out about complicated greif and it fits my situation really well, its been 4 years and i'm still suffering and i'v gotten worse but recently i'v confronted alot of my emotions and done my best to connect them to my thoughts. For the first time ever I started crying out of nowhere when I saw something about someones grandmother who was sad about her pet dog passing away and the girl made something to help her remember the pet, something just came up and reminded me of my grandma which caused me to cry instantly. I'v felt disconnected from my thoughts and emotions around my grandma passing for so long and its still so painful, I lived with her all my life and never thought she would of passed away it was just so fast. Only now am I actually really crying and greiving over her death.

I just want to hear if anyone else has expirienced this and has been made progress recovering, I just feel like i'm in so deep in so much shock and pain, and that I will never get better or function or be happy again, if you are someone who has made progress in healing from complicated greif or greif in general what is your expirience and what advice could you give and will anything actually get better?",7.919615384615388,7.959429850427357,7.314615384615386,74.68038461538461,62.46153846153847,10.78974358974359,36.803418803418815,10.389873798559362,3.766608547008546,1011,44,182,21,13,315,134,234,0.171,0.727,0.10099999999999999,-0.9668,0,0,3,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,1,6,20,12,1,0,4,0,16,4,0,4,4,51,36,27,1,5,10,0,2,1,0,3,4,1,2,1,11,21,0,0,7,0,0,4,2,6,1,1,16,4,26,6,29,15,4,33,0,2,1,0,16,13,0,6,17,129,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.20008036329946166,0.0,0.0,0.1001768016023818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168110777016387,0.10503907824903838,0.08436138811307885,0.09126038513038724,0.0,0.0,0.1926330688697777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758352229746597,0.18133297087667416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172502360130036,0.0,0.10531149104077774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185015546159125,0.0,0.3378248543777586,0.0,0.10568881180904544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490878310529687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563841022726497,0.23063191361141275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273099212817616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05183483501852484,0.07323697778749595,0.09843080081241266,0.0,0.0,0.08719949393845727,0.0,0.11240277650723388,0.0,0.0,0.1071200656421619,0.0983420532892209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912948332272668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554223625629212,0.0,0.06871386997766292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724096148067329,0.05008381578543118,0.0,0.09052292142029253,0.09072284795823432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910074739497016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536056882799959,0.0,0.15813229671898152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15593506778654315,0.21816709451522112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13134790086334952,0.0,0.20244305701372187,0.0,0.11612989352435504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523153487944846,0.0,0.0,0.17372182603790134,0.2367639463882764,0.0,0.0,0.07256088371821877,0.0,0.1637377623375678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441571813486757,0.05977751786107247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06046620229844836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217360025370924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044718873194894,0.07282395464414503,0.0,0.0,0.06601651642747387
mentalhealth,vannyvanny,2020/01/03,"What is happening to me? This year has been the worst year of my life, and this is saying a lot, considering that I lost my mom 20 years ago. I have never felt so worthless, sad, and defeated. I started a new job about a year ago and have a very toxic boss—it’s driven me to a low that I’ve never felt before. 

My anxiety is out of control, I have frequent panic attacks. My partner tries her best most of the time, but she often erupts in anger over my anxiety which pushes me further into a dark place. I need help, I feel so alone and have never really gone through anything like this. My chest is in constant pain from rapid heart beating, I can’t sleep. I honestly do not want to be alive any longer.",4.461458333333333,4.68525834027778,5.400000000000002,84.84500000000001,69.7638888888889,8.344444444444445,27.805555555555557,8.167268648758528,1.6378388888888886,547,17,116,7,9,180,98,144,0.235,0.6609999999999999,0.105,-0.9416,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,6,5,13,2,1,8,0,13,5,3,1,3,20,23,7,0,2,2,1,3,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,7,6,0,1,3,0,0,3,5,10,0,0,6,4,19,3,14,16,4,25,0,5,0,0,6,8,0,3,15,77,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606176452735565,0.0,0.0,0.15225022833628601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999667225265989,0.0,0.22491297886634304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12097050980452265,0.0,0.0,0.16723653493161938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250882772254632,0.0,0.15427002601529044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15885744965938814,0.16487577327258254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432886724693588,0.0,0.2822908541709726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129993801334869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17419863821939124,0.09853265893038184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458772715360678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383219401485387,0.07181798289518795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047056439191296,0.12497624563266806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17216751962579002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900047102104847,0.3401321086315117,0.14197590439272764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15642099564970388,0.17247572853911902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15358629633747586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094173548376748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690226672655372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471086363646667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404910696222612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571832413200654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980502962831886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129243551724105,0.08670586724085311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3786590916235553
mentalhealth,Muhammad-Jali,2020/01/03,"Independent ego Hello all,

I am not sure if this belongs here or if it even is a mental health issue. For most of my life I would be described as being a major introvert who lacks confidence and everything. This caused me to be alone without friends for basically all my life. The last few years have been increasingly worse due to exams and stuff. During this difficult time, I heard a voice 2 years ago, a few months before my IGCSE exams, he told me to let him handle everything. Afterwards, I suddenly became more social, confident and my grades improved. My parents were happy with this change in my personality and I was as well. 

However, this is when things became bad. The voice in my head became more dominant compared to my own thoughts and I felt that it was more than a fragment of my imagination. Whenever I disagreed with him, I could feel my confidence fading and the old me coming back and I start to get headaches and anxiety. I decided to confront this voice and met him in mu dreams. It was another me but more charismatic. Unlike me, he did not stutter and he spoke clearly and confidently. I thought he was an imagination, but he insisted he was not and told me he was my “deeper subconscious mind”. I’m honestly freaked out, I don’t know how to confront this. Even writing this now, he knows that I am doing this and he says he doesn’t care about the keyboard warriors of the internet. I don’t know how to confront this, I don’t know if he is created to satisfy my loneliness. I don’t know if I am even in control of myself to be honest.",4.118972868217053,5.906444212624584,5.295934385382061,79.43145418050943,71.99003322259136,9.003377630121816,29.817414174972313,9.516144504307137,2.8708038759689924,1232,52,232,30,24,408,158,301,0.083,0.779,0.139,0.97,2,1,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,1,11,14,3,0,11,0,29,4,1,5,4,55,48,25,0,7,11,1,2,0,1,1,3,6,0,1,18,17,0,1,12,1,0,2,9,7,1,0,17,8,39,7,28,24,13,22,0,0,0,0,27,5,0,6,15,169,57,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608737723861852,0.0,0.0,0.13563417529145758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732207830756807,0.10018338472866173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069949611986573,0.10934541291138992,0.0,0.0,0.11143658374442864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13352157263800174,0.13453111258509368,0.1385374070506187,0.11280970441092505,0.0,0.0,0.1468818127745187,0.1045602181745487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25949183339112675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353952640124656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662168767794461,0.0,0.12574131289061485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117870779612388,0.0,0.06842074624813839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940844120759896,0.0,0.0,0.13440186080113872,0.13920344339460636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366873193802241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3598585962109444,0.10674917913392283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13391459484627918,0.1850006290013669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197601262373918,0.0,0.1322314005706209,0.0,0.1045303372513596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13741958921233008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541462856767345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11434847095072817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041439655652664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334963525951929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269355433387366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991688521579066,0.0,0.0,0.12342744094231135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700343444659116,0.0,0.0,0.20793386000494607,0.07636332850240879,0.0,0.0,0.2502741434982935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774799568931825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623993903257094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345855325050246,0.09302961665721447,0.0,0.0,0.16866678680945174
mentalhealth,Hav0c_wreack3r,2020/01/03,"Risky behaviors....? Has anyone engaged themselves in risky behaviors they wouldn't normally do themselves as a result of their depression?

I remember watching something on tv a while back where this woman apparently suffered some sort of depression and was married, but found herself constantly cheating on her husband. Now I cannot recollect whether it was a result of her depression or result of the medication she was on... 

Any insights?",9.032876712328768,11.088649547945206,8.369753424657535,61.05983561643839,60.36986301369865,11.867397260273972,46.1068493150685,11.602472056035307,6.507763835616437,359,23,46,11,5,113,55,73,0.251,0.726,0.023,-0.9534,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,3,6,1,0,4,0,7,1,0,3,0,15,8,6,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,1,8,1,9,3,1,9,0,4,1,0,8,5,0,3,4,39,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895715334423662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18400690104979156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20235303760963572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843814047320122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6799754183677472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885402753652385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651050204535297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578399593632744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29810786260690586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20259266544315074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Angelique903,2020/01/03,"Difference in Family When They Find Out You Suffer From Mental Health. I've told a few people about my mental health struggles and somehow it spread to a lot of relatives including my nephew. I didn't want my nephew to know! He told me he knows about my struggles when he was talking to me about his. When family members approach me now, it is like they feel sad for me or pity me sometimes and it makes me feel uncomfortable. I want to know if anyone else is facing the same thing, how you feel about it, and how you are dealing with it.",3.965443925233647,5.3416112803738365,4.403820093457946,87.31171144859816,71.71028037383178,7.592990654205607,24.589953271028037,8.07648339933343,1.2421411214953268,425,12,87,6,8,134,65,107,0.168,0.81,0.022000000000000002,-0.9279,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,3,2,0,11,6,0,2,3,0,5,3,1,3,0,22,16,10,0,3,2,2,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,7,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,4,3,18,1,14,12,3,7,0,3,0,0,15,2,0,4,5,61,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694241581019173,0.17136347284564615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17242346500402356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17473665870643074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397127205432096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31532962279150045,0.0,0.2536940772298765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15285997609918425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3555497312952691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275742375476435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817080342803908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218671912982386,0.0,0.0,0.11163812201146613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370896199225029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594744105715725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654107457876213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34968403502878004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442614211207995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111092866992124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31962177910614725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972922570985025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kindofkelly,2020/01/03,"how to become confident again? I don’t know if this is the right place to post, but im going to try anyway... i’ve been depressed since i was about 12 years old, it was always pretty manageable, meaning i didn’t feel many physical side effects of it, aside from feeling really really sad all the time.

however that changed a couple years ago, around 2017, i started a new job that really brought me down and i started having physical effects manifest from my depression the main symptoms being that i felt numb to my emotions and extremely tired all the time. 

flash forward to now, i’ll be 28 this year, i still suffer from depression. i still am extremely exhausted all the time but i think a lot of it is due to a variety of health problems that make day to day life more difficult as well as a new job that i started last year that takes all of my time and makes me feel like i have nothing outside of work (however my management is a billion times better than previously.)  but i am noticing that i am less numb to my emotions and that some parts of myself seem to be healing. 

one thing that i lost when i started feeling my depression more was my confidence... i’ve never been a really confident woman, i’ve never liked myself that much, but when i was a teenager, i still had an audacity that i seem to lack now as an adult. i thought a lot less about my actions, which, usually is a bad thing, but in my case would be great because i overthink EVERYTHING. 

so i’m wondering if anyone has any tips on how to work on this? do you have anything that you do to feel more confident? is therapy the only way? 

also a little background on me, im super shy and introverted, only have a handful of friends and a boyfriend whom i live with. i was homeschooled my entire life and although i don’t lack *most* social skills, i severely question most of my ability to talk to people. 


tl;dr i have depression, it killed my confidence, how do i fix this problem?",5.119190600522192,5.8487237702349875,6.097593733681459,78.63245848563969,68.47780678851174,9.678913838120105,32.55237597911227,9.791249743138472,3.137705044386424,1536,66,293,34,25,510,188,383,0.205,0.677,0.11699999999999999,-0.9922,4,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,2,0,8,18,23,1,0,21,0,33,10,1,7,6,53,57,25,1,7,7,0,7,2,1,1,9,0,0,2,24,9,0,0,16,0,0,4,5,16,1,2,13,7,45,7,38,39,19,48,0,8,0,0,9,11,0,11,35,214,69,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723223919936154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524549062106051,0.06788733203828734,0.0,0.0,0.05548229464890527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05704787381054571,0.0,0.06713955703626245,0.07263016848892974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681221507746365,0.04973497994823355,0.09010697870183457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215750957304311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630875205233587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902750118777063,0.0,0.1052343699784487,0.0,0.35135595132579245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18354990197103194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733255801031513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20626544560448976,0.058286123039323914,0.07833679024356184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06303429658504207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04636805383917285,0.0,0.0,0.08995050174409966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672369244204642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17625699110440654,0.0,0.16192600012046907,0.0,0.09026447550355353,0.0,0.04483835379266735,0.06650469811589409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525532170651265,0.0797190582500219,0.08177210422802657,0.07204325321959221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906238907351674,0.1387255420414664,0.0,0.0,0.10892057347769243,0.08271691470534441,0.0,0.08887270072046685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0599761967208342,0.0,0.12585061237503814,0.15759542298620796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828540229493232,0.09288790430880707,0.08561235196301357,0.0,0.0552857984064132,0.12410193350036824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835130691060468,0.0,0.05656249650956779,0.0,0.08524156771432198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813826775806904,0.0830038140894795,0.0,0.15613642899498462,0.0,0.0,0.09139666706051486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20906815496652587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.069675275313324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14854838326043848,0.0,0.09217064688206512,0.0,0.0674900193241341,0.0,0.0,0.08316817703842143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309921967841911,0.0,0.19546763773109596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480064704899935,0.06134364287656704,0.06557693834968717,0.0,0.0,0.09330241144842596,0.0,0.1084062133284883,0.05227797271482218,0.0,0.0647713579621666,0.2378716234813505,0.09377282399486536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055392553855186426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985709962497193,0.0,0.0,0.06476035628943548,0.0,0.0,0.07335695665861314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847815850759824,0.1187933367552836,0.0,0.0,0.057957415896037735,0.0,0.0,0.2101586884310919
mentalhealth,Rainbow__Veined,2020/01/03,"I got followed today by a guy with a questionable behaviour and I'm horrified So I was going home from work and I had to drop by the nearby supermarket. I stopped for a second in front of it. I saw a guy coming towards me. He had a very questionable behaviour. He looked like he was under the influence of something. I got of the bench and went closer to the store hoping he'd stop or keep walking past me. He didn't. I went into the store, he went in as well. I walked past the checkout and he was nearby me, staring at me. I literally darted to my home while he was in the store with security behind him. The security probably noticed that I was being scared shitless and he was walking really close to him. I'm at home safe and sound but holy fuck I'm even scared to get out of my block. It was around 9 pm. I got home and literally broke down while explaining to my bf what happened. CAN A WOMAN GO TO THE FUCKING STORE WITHOUT FEELING LIKE PREY?! FFS!",1.0688951048951054,3.4156492717948765,3.2975874125874114,87.20763986013986,84.48717948717949,6.417249417249418,22.70979020979021,7.686295010490155,1.2096153846153848,748,27,154,14,22,255,104,195,0.20600000000000002,0.742,0.052000000000000005,-0.9869,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,4,12,2,2,15,0,13,2,0,1,0,28,36,13,0,1,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,4,3,4,14,0,7,4,0,4,11,2,5,1,1,17,5,21,7,31,17,0,32,0,1,3,2,18,13,2,4,9,98,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077726913225271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104285978445766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996167789875175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06121363246740764,0.08648819736197277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22384356787757198,0.06325098098373855,0.0,0.13760700429593986,0.0,0.2904779938303934,0.0,0.0,0.23974493026797594,0.10705655921699664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4857485414689106,0.12024394014457028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760730992019917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118291580978663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016633298735244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378322485950909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311387111804931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305275459167019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27123893533365523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755674466737589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424125121198193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320103742695658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20242997048157335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475458478530424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989053841171258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885114010899924,0.3366828234263017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167014454092528,0.0,0.08813608642014628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bluetundra123,2020/01/03,"I constantly read into things way too much and it makes me incredibly upset and paranoid Last year I went through an emotional time and I'm still dealing with it. During this time, I've started to worry. Really worry. Whenever the slightest thing happens no matter how insignificant or small, I read into it massively and end up upsetting myself. Whenever something happens, there's always this little voice in my head that starts to tell me negative stuff. I basically have an argument with this irrational voice, trying to reassure myself and tell it it's wrong. But I rarely win these arguments. It causes me unnecessary pain to myself and others and I'm worried I'm going to push the people I love away. This stuff has already caused my friends to become annoyed with it but I talk to them and they understand, but I hate that this affects them. Is there something wrong with me?",5.085529100529102,7.520874043209879,5.675943562610228,74.97888888888889,70.91358024691358,8.826102292768962,30.08994708994709,9.424239791934726,3.1708539682539687,713,30,115,17,14,230,98,162,0.217,0.723,0.06,-0.9724,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,3,1,6,11,2,2,4,0,3,3,1,5,0,25,16,13,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,20,14,0,0,1,2,0,3,2,7,0,0,1,2,20,4,17,15,1,20,0,0,0,1,10,7,0,1,9,84,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938648066514786,0.0,0.1051002305833874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867261977855913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949972630231094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595108017106631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364964870361698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022030176076702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14208200883364902,0.11187337368583124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758697104215562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178501502241287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22339144002037373,0.0,0.0,0.12470520289378965,0.12963073737254252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295969655895423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265960342175084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11399991483858317,0.0,0.0843130599190731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285255312904622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440299117645302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756761014227052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526888244196419,0.0,0.08091756825202956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944795733627041,0.0,0.0,0.1788060630464139,0.0,0.10087151353236226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28918998977063426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015233790247883,0.2208014182539616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782980970691624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14730502275761756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575635553772262,0.0,0.0,0.1314934049026103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025918200531628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709084946222495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3848225120713755,0.0,0.0,0.27620081788276196,0.0,0.08133964743508004
mentalhealth,ana23rdz,2020/01/03,New therapist After going septic in August I landed an emergency therapist (the first therapist I could find). She's underwhelming. I don't do any work for when we visit. And the new things I learn with coping are from research of my own. As I understand Zoloft reqs co-therapy. What are some things I should look for in a new therapist?,3.626458333333332,6.0472645625000006,5.16375,77.03958333333338,75.25,9.266666666666666,24.729166666666664,9.725611199111238,2.749716666666667,268,9,47,8,6,90,48,64,0.047,0.953,0.0,-0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,0,6,1,0,0,0,9,9,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,9,0,9,7,2,12,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,1,7,36,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982786687005444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894734283540674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761120414086187,0.13737473040271272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178611800931838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13562220092988242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4679430414131406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846932411151629,0.750071695027256,0.21459139786250447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813076066181473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757641655567558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,about3Oninjaz,2020/01/03,"Am I being over the top? Feel this the best place for me to talk about this. You see, I have this best friend, right. She's absolutely amazing, best thing to ever happen to me. But she's busy over the next couple of days and we can't rly talk. We haveng spoken now in 6 hours and it's really getting to my me, it's effecting my mental health so bad, she knows everything about me, from my depression, from what I've been going through and attempting over the last few months. I feel really lost without her, I feel I might break because of it and its actually worrying me, in case I resort to something bad to take my mind of it... Am I just being over the top about this, over has anyone gone through anything similar?",2.369750663129974,4.295484075862067,3.652413793103449,88.74281167108755,77.20689655172414,7.220159151193633,22.188328912466847,8.139509932561175,1.0719230769230772,561,16,119,10,13,183,86,145,0.11,0.741,0.149,0.7333,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,2,1,0,8,7,9,0,0,5,0,9,1,0,1,1,17,20,6,0,0,3,0,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,11,6,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,3,4,23,5,25,14,4,21,0,2,1,0,10,11,0,1,7,86,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.14898592574614314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675186733505554,0.0,0.12563611238995134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549496174466833,0.09306748221638388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4806597829052002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16892875137895133,0.0,0.09846086061274756,0.0,0.13149623780152034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810063596192815,0.0,0.0,0.13721182011853694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23158677104884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795406940058555,0.0,0.07976485989181557,0.0,0.0867670607402913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13500741512039174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16228328055003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503512442195962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390458181654925,0.12444812113424372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16665960898899645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538575466253331,0.1619609490920325,0.15415527772179324,0.0,0.12186139676203525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16236848788469238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950982780342127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956112862075298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13038112115243236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165988032332575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753442518218543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147904030210809,0.2454240677292633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142854527734596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471704358962372,0.0,0.0,0.15504590695195208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,llx5771,2020/01/03,"I want to make difference. I want to make a difference in the world, and I want to wake up in the morning to a feeling of happiness. But most of all I want to feel loved.

I don't care if I don't make a great impact like Bill Gates, Steve Jobs or even Barack Obama. I don't have to be famous or have a very exciting life in general. I would be fine with just having someone to wake up with in the morning.

I would like to be recognised by someone when I walk down the street, even though I hate small talk, and I would like to have a job that was more then a paycheck. I would like to come home and not feel lonely...

And that I haven't accomplished anything today and that the next day will be the same. That I am in fact alone and that it pains me and that I have no one to turn to when the my nights are sleepless and my mind is racing. And what is keeping me alive is the fact that I know that someday I want to make difference in the world, however small or big that world might be.",5.228454545454547,4.012844728571434,5.565930735930738,89.16058441558442,68.3809523809524,9.16017316017316,28.138528138528137,8.00094639256281,1.36247619047619,763,19,184,8,11,244,100,210,0.09,0.753,0.157,0.8543,3,3,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,6,13,1,0,15,0,26,5,2,4,3,45,45,18,0,10,7,0,3,4,0,6,2,0,2,0,11,12,0,1,4,0,1,2,6,3,0,1,1,3,22,10,27,33,4,25,0,1,0,1,2,16,0,6,11,129,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449911397951315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892084532738687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255994814626478,0.0,0.0,0.1035484472646438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752413998010664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3767749583503279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587923460179702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18234215245125288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252961537031108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279635267019922,0.0,0.11868039774018613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057830779314427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385755509788069,0.10684628962230644,0.0,0.0,0.06606310878493714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490638272702876,0.23490999878167665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849230762980598,0.0,0.3209587813079468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752156756078634,0.12137569440693342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784244729119768,0.1128069550831224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145597252016569,0.0,0.1279096627899118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20370349834040066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966185429556731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810363471134948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394301753803612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13075165813326214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918409265672512,0.3545086193390873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415689245808071,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,davida_usa,2020/01/03,"I used to work as an administrator responsible for a hospital psychiatric unit (details in comments). I've written a novel. I hope that by describing how psychiatrists and hospitals operate, I provide comfort. Is this true? Does a realistic story provide comfort? The book is called ""Dappled Psychiatric"" and it's about a somewhat self-absorbed psychiatrist who admits three patients to the hospital. Over the course of several days, you get to know the patients while learning that the psychiatrist may lose his job and his family. I just published it on Amazon.

Why did I write it?  In 2012, after a 33+ year successful career in health care administration and consulting, I was suddenly and unexpectedly fired from my position as Director of Behavioral Health Services. In addition to the trauma of being fired for the first time in my life, I grieved for the lost opportunity to contribute to circumstances I think were suboptimal for psychiatrists, staff, patients and organization. While I was empathetic for the psychiatrists who had made substantial sacrifices to achieve their professional status, I felt the greatest angst for the adolescent and young adult patients with situational dysfunctions who found themselves locked on a mixed unit with psychotic, severely depressed, demented or other seriously mentally ill adults and elderly. Part of my job was to meet each newly admitted patient and then visit them periodically. My job was to orient them to the unit and address concerns they might have. I'd come home at night and tell my wife that I had never cried so much in my life. Anyway, I've spent more than four years, substantial emotional capital and several thousand dollars (on writing courses, copyediting, cover design and interior layout) to birth this catharsis/novel. 

Other than processing my own issues as described above, I'm hoping people read it and get something valuable from it. Do readers of this subreddit feel that a book like this would be helpful or comforting? Or, am I deceiving myself in thinking this way?",10.474346695226435,11.092547741279073,10.02861077111383,55.40990208078336,57.05232558139534,13.753733170134636,44.558751529987745,12.936686537176746,6.546880232558139,1669,91,230,56,19,541,214,344,0.083,0.757,0.159,0.9731,3,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,4,7,5,17,0,0,20,0,18,5,0,3,2,45,38,25,1,3,4,1,4,1,0,3,5,0,2,2,19,19,0,0,9,4,2,2,1,6,0,4,14,4,27,11,46,19,7,31,1,4,0,0,24,13,0,8,16,166,46,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248205773248553,0.0,0.12463169713906005,0.0,0.0,0.1052988265245144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427476028440793,0.07883460527770476,0.0,0.10528502328816663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10697293641205784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750340381769838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523687296785362,0.0,0.06180815256456593,0.0,0.11736944762131007,0.0,0.0,0.10397717332320916,0.0,0.13402971103423092,0.0,0.0,0.12773057650460098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25987053709900804,0.0,0.0,0.08193481000495723,0.0,0.1226165592080786,0.2428235508283953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758666824522966,0.3639126353768929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717983721992944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17268327438551828,0.05972022725596094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675514986970494,0.13343926112995122,0.0,0.0,0.11566632324178645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318904061695587,0.12967718759122598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986037157847268,0.0,0.09427892572146716,0.0,0.0,0.11471383982898448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323738700102121,0.0,0.0847457363362658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227295260539975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275228468141057,0.4142887860663616,0.0,0.0,0.13740273863190045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941062261503317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068430367325461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15665274926948844,0.0,0.0,0.07127905283325006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055760021442566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702832119899067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030247196977856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899208323898489,0.0,0.0,0.08683569837526689,0.0,0.0,0.15743694053129445
mentalhealth,louvem,2020/01/03,"Kind of struggling to take decisions in terms of how to pick a new study/life/geography path ? Hi !  I've been tip toeing around the idea of writing here for a long while, so here i go. Might be a long post (EDIT : it is. he last 3 bullet points are about my situation atm if you want to skip ! )

I'm a 23 yo, and I'm since quite a long time now facing a huge wave (or waves) of changes. I'm in this transitional state where the things I had to quit have been left behind, but i'm still not feeling able to take any decisions. My brain is like a slow hamster wheel, kind of under control in terms of speed, but going round and round in terms of problem solving. i'm going to try to recap the facts + feels.

First of all, I started studying very young, I was 17, freshly out of high school. I started studying arts and fashion design in Paris, in the best schools out there, as it was my secret dream since I was 12. And it was hard, as it's supposed to be. my mental health wasn't great but it was much better in a way than what it was before I turned 18, and I was trying to grow as a person and overcome the obstacles that come up when you want to study fashion and are insecure. And then, two years in, I started to actually study fashion design, and everything started to take a bad turn. The teachers, in this famous uni, that required a very long and tough contest to get in, were the worse. I won't go into details because it's still quite traumatic for me, but let's say their methods of pedagogy were non existant and they ended up not teaching anything and only criticising the intents. I resisted 2 years, and in the middle of the 2nd year I had a big burnout, and stared at the ceiling for 2 months, unable to feel anything. During this time, I was extremely peaceful and quiet ; just before I broke down, I realised I couldn't do it anymore, and that I actually didn't want to DO it anymore. I took me 4 years to realise it, and 1 more to accept to let go of this path.

That takes us to me, stubborn as a donkey, doing an exchange program the next year (last year) to still study fashion but in another school. Usually you do a semester abroad, then you go back to your school to do your last 3 semesters and be graduated. It didn't work that way ; I was extremely weak and depressed, spent most of my days crying and having to take 3 hours long naps in the middle of the day (the hormones + the body don't deal well with acute stress). The main problem to me was that if I left my studies right there and then, what would I do ? I was learning the language of the country, having absolutely no hopes or dreams or desires about anything, struggling to feel anything but fear and tremendous loss. I had moved to another country, where I had friends and I felt good in, but couldn't see myself settle there without a plan. And going back to Paris in this university was at that point completely impossible. As I was navigating that I stupidly didn't seek help and I was really really low.

I wrote my master's thesis, because I was really passionate about it, and I loved writing it. I had to go back to France in June to present it, and I had made the decision to ask for a gap year so that I could take time to think. The presentation of the thesis went good, but the rest of the contact with my uni was a disaster. Picture a fight between middle schoolers, and you'll have an idea of what it felt like. It's just heartbreaking to communicate and never be listened to or taken in consideration, even in a class of 10 students. I felt like I was going to crumble down again, so after a lot of debates with myself and friends I just quit the uni cold turkey. That means, I don't have any diploma from the 5 years I studied.

I stayed in Germany because I felt better there than in France. This year I took a job in retail (ain't fun but at least my head is above the water), I'm continuing to learn german and I'm doing a Yoga teacher training, something i've been wanting to do for 5 years, and it feels nice to learn things. But here's the sticky part. My mental health is still quite bad, I'm able to have longer periods where i'm not completely not ok, but when I'm not ok I think it's to the level where I should take medications. The problem is I still cannot really feel positive emotions, I can dissociate for quite long periods of time, and I can't seem able to take any decisions. Let me bullet point it out :

\- I have to decide what I'm going to study for next year or the year after, to have some sort of a professional project. Lately i've felt a pull towards osteopathy or somatic practices, and it feels really good to have something I can think about and not just nothing as it was until then. But when I look at the studies, I would have to go back to France for 5 years, and I have people I love there but so many things that are for me really traumatic : the language, the mentality, the fact that you need some money to just get by in Paris (where i'd study).

\- there comes the 2nd choice, the geography of things : I really like Berlin but I feel completely unable to settle down here and enjoy the present moment because I feel like the city doesn't carry a future for me in terms of studying (I would need to master the language, which I can do, but I don't want to realise half way there that I actually don't want to live in Germany) (living abroad is so loaded, even if i'm m aware it's such a privilege for me to have the choice). Paris hurt me a lot, the mindset of the city and the political climate are very tough, but some of my closest friends are there and ready to welcome me back there. I could study there but I'm not sure I could find peace and grounding. My bonds with my friends from France are changing and getting a little looser, and i don't feel safe to explore and build my life here and now in Berlin.

\- and in the end it's this whole identity crisis that comes up : if I can't seem to know where I want to be and what I want to do, how can I make choices ? If i'm always a foot out the door in terms of everything in Berlin or in Paris, how can I be alive ?  My mom just told me it's symptomatic for me to feel lost, and that i won't ever feel ok with any thing because it's me (that was nice). I try to take all of the things i've learned in the past 20 years, to remain present and to breathe and to give me time, bu i'm really scared to never find this feeling of home and belonging somewhere, in any language, in any studies. I really want to be able to make decisions and trust what they have for me, but I need to make them first and I am completely and utterly lost. It's like I've jumped and I am floating, waiting to see an appealing place to land but I can't see anything, it's all foggy, so I keep floating. I can't think of having feelings for someone, or something, because it might leave me or i might leave it.

Anywayyy this is my messy brain at the moment. I'm quite sad. It's getting slowly better, but I'm really not grounded. Does anyone have a similar experience ? How'd you get out of it ? What is home for you ?

thank you for reading this novel haha

xx

(i could write much more in more details about different things, but i tried keeping it as tidy as possible)",5.7025786606910565,5.106082647178791,6.2686632927965364,82.4651851012581,67.19170632222979,9.276434104623544,31.14485820513466,8.589422402637114,2.155798945875402,5638,191,1198,74,81,1842,483,1471,0.11,0.7829999999999999,0.10800000000000001,-0.7749,2,0,4,0,1,0,174.0,1,11,4,23,63,66,3,6,82,4,118,17,8,10,9,231,235,115,0,32,50,1,22,6,4,10,5,3,3,1,73,69,1,8,45,7,9,22,32,26,1,4,49,31,130,40,198,160,25,199,0,9,7,3,41,79,0,27,98,786,203,21,0.13312408225891298,0.0,0.09743242567872508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027692475196824308,0.0,0.0,0.13579341143303544,0.06979610377551428,0.0,0.0,0.06601165904642428,0.0232708634011294,0.0,0.1369372209902045,0.0296271642887146,0.0311132616204843,0.0,0.0,0.12795525249738365,0.055576524044780785,0.1217268073979616,0.0,0.05663939447518744,0.0,0.034926377806883686,0.08830307440815963,0.0,0.036967711178389984,0.0,0.07430525128914524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041381370327504,0.08600595694067735,0.13957806745681495,0.0,0.037327494505961636,0.10628874727857966,0.0,0.03655763833402263,0.0429270099882267,0.034311270837525804,0.028664894245243287,0.0,0.0,0.034771582985997584,0.0,0.0,0.02912444537303353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037436668632416084,0.05895421178019054,0.0,0.0,0.043963600404445136,0.030104588475182537,0.0,0.0,0.059821670621967124,0.03255522423945974,0.0,0.037450400809802456,0.2355903757242921,0.0237759677413042,0.15977499451555946,0.0,0.06083649971927476,0.05661763818148121,0.0,0.0,0.10285133572467207,0.0,0.08693979810801497,0.03192618752514036,0.20805808043190446,0.08374362312710502,0.0,0.036692442664936736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029813257367355638,0.0,0.03415592867407656,0.07075233713924509,0.0,0.0,0.02230756655073252,0.035163225481459434,0.06676715438994872,0.03305556283014435,0.032775101305184566,0.0,0.035628020848981215,0.07514044247566419,0.0,0.0,0.033026277564775136,0.05916340049691194,0.0,0.06931412299347478,0.01829037852849459,0.0813854211566898,0.037542440816233306,0.07047959075606812,0.07231985244505833,0.10209629515669516,0.04701473812315291,0.09755655335186232,0.033356325843673346,0.05877550179043451,0.17671593544286066,0.027947675235155917,0.0,0.07266033076678556,0.05658866708714795,0.060074840874926635,0.03149130635975821,0.06664601897494833,0.033741731189903014,0.0,0.03625278806049257,0.0,0.033527126878020404,0.10061832284900783,0.10591771038932338,0.0,0.038978329049665215,0.02656459309530896,0.035372457892720824,0.048930758956762126,0.07403236513939694,0.05133674953871139,0.032143017048580275,0.07078948587106969,0.0,0.0,0.031934036825945034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025311715839699298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03604010205982247,0.031770499955004965,0.02307286918829375,0.02905970344831488,0.034771582985997584,0.0,0.09438396543054163,0.037519350121502815,0.031874017977209235,0.0,0.0,0.09553632594132087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477892340866913,0.033290026881547564,0.0,0.2132067398300132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028421809717870988,0.0,0.02646640335542576,0.033320107506272754,0.13472867840157424,0.07956199344549081,0.060595582348824666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055060808255440366,0.037409261534854105,0.0,0.0,0.028198900723500387,0.07686406678284108,0.0,0.0,0.09422591060874967,0.03547313974131039,0.13289133006919415,0.0,0.03812329661206524,0.06958509755706017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03136696801755638,0.0,0.22520867031505945,0.0,0.0,0.03064069228987195,0.0,0.0,0.15477301865842916,0.0853005365966651,0.0,0.0,0.0970321536508538,0.0,0.0,0.03180144137640127,0.07395287682993959,0.09038251335953977,0.07240038697757929,0.03251072117031256,0.0,0.04003296995538728,0.0,0.036654342244878735,0.08238098230901364,0.17667007389527795,0.07925077506085804,0.0,0.0,0.02992363437758113,0.030851839491780168,0.0,0.037157070926755284,0.0,0.03208171618840961,0.0,0.02422897934616404,0.0,0.033916203232589384,0.07092564639016323,0.0,0.0,0.30004640515589875
mentalhealth,MindFlayer_2008,2020/01/03,"Am I being narcissistic? So I have really bad social anxiety... always have. Whenever I go out I freak out that everyone is thinking about me and what I’ve done wrong. I can make a tiny mistake and dwell on the fact that everyone saw it and everyone is thinking about how stupid I am. My dad told me I’m being narcissistic because I think everyone is thinking about me, am I?",2.632065637065637,4.840345797297296,4.957181467181467,78.350945945946,77.51351351351352,9.093436293436293,28.138996138996138,9.606745405546679,3.0498401544401545,295,13,56,9,7,103,45,74,0.214,0.7659999999999999,0.02,-0.9405,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,1,1,2,0,12,0,0,2,1,13,21,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,3,1,12,0,6,16,0,4,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,41,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547851025962668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14230622584930205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15532049618305308,0.113397208916222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903649643947272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7110074966097534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057205189126866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241710466032196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191703770220895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18962587612628926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47678122720303207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17775187415243834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20338571902197927,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wooes09,2020/01/03,"I am obsessing about the same incident again...Going back on meds during college?  

Hey everybody,

I experienced a relapse in health anxiety at the start of November during college and just wanted to get some advice... (Am I just crazy??)

I will not go into full detail about everything, as it is quite long/complex. A bit about myself: I am a male 20yo, entrepreneurial-minded, ambitious/workaholic with big goals. I definitely have a compulsive/obessive personality, which actually allows me to work extremely hard, and get super immersed in whatever I am doing. However, I have had some issues with OCD and hypochondria since my early teens (irrational fear of hiv, germs, cancer, deadly diseases etc.). These were just ""phases"" as I call them, so I always managed to snap out of the anxiety.

Basically, 3 years ago, an incident happened  [https://www.reddit.com/r/hookah/comments/9v3fow/bad\_hookah\_experience\_should\_i\_be\_worried/](https://www.reddit.com/r/hookah/comments/9v3fow/bad_hookah_experience_should_i_be_worried/) . After that, I continue to live perfectly well for 1,5 years, without noticing anything being wrong. I built a business during high school, got great grades etc. Then, in my final year of high school, I come across an article on fb about that same incident, where the author was saying things like ""you can get brain damage, concentration issues etc."". Like I said, I never noticed anything being wrong with me, but when I read those articles, I spiraled into crippling anxiety, because I now thought ""I have fucked up my life/health/future etc."". I was in the middle of my preparation for my final exams, and I consulted more than 5 GPs. All of them said that I was fine and that I had nothing to worry about. I even consulted a specialist, who also reassured me that I had nothing to worry about. I do not know how, but I managed to get through my final exams with excellent grades, under extreme anxiety. After graduating, instead of being happy like my peers, I fell into a deep deep depression, because I just thought that I had ruined my life. I did not apply to any colleges because I wanted to take a gap year to focus on my business.

I was severely depressed and anxious but nobody could understand why. Nothing seemed to be wrong with me health wise, but I just cannot deal with uncertainty when it comes to health, I always drive myself crazy with ""what if"" thoughts, so I was put on an SSRI (10mg Citalopram) by my GP, but she did not mention anything about getting therapy. I was feeling like shit, laying in bed all day (very unusual of me, as I was always super productive, passionately working 10-18 hours a day), so I decided to see a psychiatrist, but the only thing he did, was listening to me for 50 minutes and telling me ""just don't think about it, it will go away"". After that, months of severe depression followed, I just felt completely hopeless about my future, and I was so mad at myself for that incident (normally I do not engage in any drugs/alcohol/smoking etc.) . A lot of people had the same thing happen to them, but they do not overreact like I do.

Somehow (probably the meds were kicking in), I found back to myself and started working on my business again, started getting back on track with my goals etc. I started feeling less and less depressed, and used all of the pain and suffering as motivation to fight myself back after these horrible months. Around march, my prescription for the SSRI's ended, and because I was not seeing any psychiatrist, I just stopped taking them. I did not experience any withdrawal side-effects, and during the following months, I was doing very well mentally - feeling on top of the world again.

In September, I left home for the first time to study abroad at a highly ranked university. The first 2 months were going super well, I was very happy with the new environment I found myself in. I was running my business next to uni work, doing better than ever, waking up at 5 am, working up to 100+ hours a week (my compulsive/obsessive personality), but loving every second of it. I also managed to get very good grades, and started socializing a lot. The thoughts about my depressive/anxious episode did come up from time to time, and I remember being super proud of myself that I had digged myself out of that hole, thinking ""How the hell did you waste months dwelling on something so stupid"".

Then, in November, I was not in a very good place mentally, as I had to rewrite a whole assignment, which I had spent 2 weeks on - throwing me off guard a bit (I am very structured, always like to have everything planned). I don't know how, but all of that combined (probably a burnout) triggered my OCD and I started dwelling on that incident again. At first I thought I could snap out of it, but I just started obsessing with the same thoughts again, leading me back into that negative spiral, feeling super anxious again - even had a full-blown panic attack. I saw a GP (she thought I was crazy) who gave me a 2-week prescription for a benzo to reduce my anxiety. That did help a bit, but the following weeks were awful to control my anxiety and studying for finals at the same time. I really needed help, so I am now seeing a psychiatrist and doing CBT to finally treat the root of the problem.

I am currently back home for Christmas, and I must say that my anxiety is now much better than it was just 1-2 months ago. However, this relapse made me very confused about myself and my future. I thought that I had overcome the anxiety, but it just came back out of nowhere. The thing is, every time I get these obsessive, irrational thoughts, I start feeling hopeless about the future, because I think to myself ""You are not good enough anymore because of that incident, and there is something wrong with you now"". This makes me neglect my passion for business, consequently, making me depressed. I am kind of mad at myself because I have put my health at risk like that,

Now, I don't know whether I should go back on an SSRI to help me during this phase. I really do not want to mess up my grades/and even uni experience (I did not feel like socializing anymore, and became very pessimistic, not attending any lectures). The anxiety/OCD definitely is not as bad as it was 1-2 months ago, but I feel like the meds could prevent me from having another breakdown. Now would be the perfect time to take it, as I still have 2 weeks of break to get over the initial phase of side-effects. My GP prescribed me 10mg Citalopram along with the benzos, but I did not take it yet. My psychiatrist said, that I should not take the meds unless it is absolutely necessary (I live in a country where they do not like putting everybody on ADs). I am planning on seeing one of the specialists that put these articles out to get that final bit of reassurance about my specific case (I would have to drive 300km for that, sounds crazy, I know). I do fear that the SSRIs would make it hard to concentrate/study, but I actually responded pretty well to them when I first took them. I also always saw my OCD as my gift in business, so I'm kinda scared that the meds would make me ""less obsessed"" about my business.

This was longer than I initially thought, but if you made it through that wall of text: Thank you!",9.756157559798114,8.42532597203326,9.05409223904616,68.15580151415406,59.49886621315194,11.982195889108331,39.479299246580354,10.875528500678817,4.285848131080389,5763,240,982,114,62,1830,458,1323,0.14,0.718,0.142,-0.3807,4,0,4,0,1,2,262.0,0,6,8,31,76,81,8,12,63,1,100,15,3,16,9,186,194,70,1,18,49,0,10,10,0,9,8,7,3,3,57,50,0,5,32,1,1,23,24,39,4,6,66,24,170,42,178,110,31,182,1,11,6,5,46,69,3,10,99,725,227,30,0.0,0.0,0.06295905730448699,0.0,0.0,0.031522518695274435,0.08578533097867774,0.03447440121457398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739105211409493,0.13420779483892972,0.0,0.0,0.10968403373450904,0.03382572742047655,0.1974205986776524,0.07288558201075361,0.0639832960492881,0.0,0.0,0.07963770228487523,0.028716800201197268,0.0,0.03669856783431394,0.03030781287506829,0.1984376437706268,0.05386880503710364,0.13765087680901714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05705983693927109,0.14087119832161935,0.0,0.0,0.03601102411247197,0.0329394159263452,0.03689499662222566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336322226150393,0.03382230101881015,0.0,0.03618051971809199,0.07726708223297232,0.0,0.0,0.04160797695837089,0.033256976593798185,0.1389204908048955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028571352698706982,0.033331533030372895,0.2158597461596494,0.06391907355544461,0.029179554410152776,0.054358158237193366,0.0,0.05798350953240671,0.06310977728947548,0.0,0.0725992988751549,0.11417565452891705,0.06913618615979601,0.03097310663915568,0.2120248919532096,0.0,0.10975585700185243,0.0,0.07073930425356666,0.0,0.029822355441724745,0.16853673793892565,0.0,0.09166591276879922,0.08117040395868999,0.025799975885382832,0.035564981333844364,0.0,0.0,0.05705196341551376,0.0686792974665005,0.05779435026735519,0.0,0.0,0.17144576423142396,0.0,0.0,0.0648663427963956,0.10224825880133492,0.0647155770270255,0.0,0.0635360189441755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673387420897528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033592142024254264,0.0709134550561249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03504882770768393,0.0,0.045570100062140316,0.1575981658601285,0.0,0.05696948669110205,0.02854765399880752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05484984761139284,0.0291144502678767,0.06104732427276824,0.086130885042225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791589578840943,0.0,0.06501772597780357,0.0,0.032571771176603016,0.0,0.1802383358181433,0.0,0.023713623331638213,0.023919182380654595,0.024879653771718455,0.031155347486271506,0.034307156471254416,0.0,0.031606366409400226,0.09285836601287427,0.07345276610642902,0.0,0.0,0.021859115293703667,0.02453395402390908,0.034325194084586605,0.037848262200323994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022363901185135628,0.05633355185120941,0.03370314457224638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032818372788274805,0.06955998613090288,0.03086691610980365,0.0,0.12971433966915166,0.0,0.034310761270747975,0.03226711275280689,0.0,0.04133109257155148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0365424597426424,0.0,0.09205532848791836,0.05130632211679907,0.03229626907980945,0.06529441193437331,0.10282301953789193,0.029366820503459838,0.0,0.07288558201075361,0.033112766764934916,0.026684467912276785,0.0,0.0,0.06576671850827877,0.0,0.04966815874207979,0.0,0.0,0.1826611971607449,0.0,0.025761586474356286,0.026969452770075328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212714477158672,0.0,0.02819524874178188,0.02969918517817062,0.03689027250794185,0.0,0.08572414558550999,0.06200960820863353,0.0,0.2560955294552663,0.11286073587048664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035840250648592614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033582114539397155,0.0,0.02786088576901567,0.0,0.21293235593232904,0.057080490549613436,0.0,0.12937864594130333,0.0,0.11601664220588252,0.0,0.02910817334597503,0.036015332802937026,0.0,0.031095930238757438,0.0,0.11742243573877233,0.06551990794920311,0.0,0.09166171948054287,0.14107791198933295,0.0,0.08309336453131318
mentalhealth,coolicidal,2020/01/03,"ocd and eating disorder? I don’t know where exactly to put this—if this is the wrong subreddit, please feel free to redirect me to somewhere better suited for this question... I have OCD. Typically about time, schedules, and routines. I can make it through my day mostly fine, but I have trouble eating. If I don’t have a set schedule, or I can’t eat at a specific time, I won’t at all, and it’s causes a drastic loss in weight. It makes me insecure, and it makes me hate myself. Even now, I’m in bed, hungry and thinking about food, but I’m afraid to eat because I’m not on a schedule. I feel dirty and gross. Not eating today makes me not want to eat tomorrow. I feel dirty and gross... I guess my question here is, how can I stop tying my eating habits to my OCD, or at the very least, how can I manage it better? I’m really scared. Thanks to anyone who responds! (“note: I do have a therapist, but I’m low on funds and I might not be able to see her for a bit due to a change in insurance—hence why I’m asking here)",1.445263157894736,3.119408727699536,3.4074573758339533,90.5999777613047,79.09389671361502,6.549938225846306,22.008648381517176,7.475848149327749,0.7279446009389674,781,23,174,11,19,264,111,213,0.196,0.7340000000000001,0.07,-0.9825,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,3,9,15,1,3,9,0,16,9,0,7,2,39,37,16,0,2,10,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,8,8,9,1,7,0,2,1,8,10,0,0,0,5,24,6,22,34,4,23,0,2,1,0,6,10,0,8,11,107,32,1,0.1017572473000222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115103328602193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512929000684817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06203027347747087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17999203204375916,0.11109255915563596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045327233009341,0.10764567511393497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562500634148109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116622621240295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7288614739879237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720970214620896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15435456509421985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304526734927194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209708011447404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046421484079388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05592312193417371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716950109229587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794835882087396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116989004075612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10229413907681616,0.22798281043217555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518829826362718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187675624264042,0.0,0.08108735154289742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507361513073505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368440179652414,0.0,0.11814800705447626,0.0,0.06520193529229233,0.0,0.0,0.118670938421498,0.0,0.09645397227779506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396038590356357,0.060019060896921175,0.0,0.0,0.1239129136493966,0.0,0.0,0.09182008836092832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112555758022774,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Just_bcoz,2020/01/03,"Heavily contiplating suicide. I'm 22 my life has been getting out of one mess to suffer another one, from dealing with frequent deaths as a child/teen, being abused up until I was 19, dropping out of school because of my depressing and suicidal nature for the one of the main people I had left to die a year later, getting tricked out of my house and forced to live with a mentally and emotionally draining and sometimes toxic friend where id never leave my room, being taken advantage of and also raped multiple times and now im damn near homeless and pregnant by a guy whose not the best, everything is always my fault with him and hes put his hands on me when hes been too angry, i just feel like i really have nothing. If my mom finds out im pregnant  she'll kick me out,  all i can see in my future is me having to do everything for a kid im not ready for and cant afford or would feel right aborting since he wants me to keep it and me always having to take on everything emotionally with him. I want to snap and break down, how would i even be able to move on with a baby ? He can also end up just leaving and leave me stuck with a child i cant mentally or financially care for. Its only been 5 months we always believed he couldn't have kids because he has a condition, even if he stays idk if i should trust him as a dad, even after everything i love him but i can't see forever with him not with how he is now and i mentally cant keep pushing myself with him im going to break if im not already and I see no hope, i hate lies saying it will get better im 2 fucking 2 no it doesn't always some peoples lives are just shit and im tired of being mis treated im fucking tired of my life.",2.70681110079439,3.8063960640668526,4.518118229650267,86.35207262973282,74.43175487465182,7.546930774785927,25.274012173733624,8.045849151850463,1.36546664603322,1333,43,287,20,27,454,186,359,0.16899999999999998,0.767,0.064,-0.9882,1,0,0,0,1,1,19.0,1,0,0,3,16,21,7,0,12,0,35,10,2,2,2,61,58,30,4,11,14,2,3,1,1,5,4,1,1,4,5,30,0,2,3,0,0,4,13,11,0,3,7,7,40,10,49,41,4,38,0,2,3,4,28,17,4,8,14,189,45,1,0.06951753136368112,0.08236690707511027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671432452274744,0.11118628943108697,0.2313766201116393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289519298003948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475448376180393,0.0,0.0,0.07832245219216769,0.07295436027532885,0.061482607208911765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087775632586744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716695223313965,0.05987534789850199,0.0,0.07214822215274791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639573196044948,0.061571898891736386,0.0,0.0,0.13774702149077478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24991149869351126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030030525116512,0.04966333829647335,0.0,0.0,0.06353776425013598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370907228588749,0.12853567511029326,0.10896012272168226,0.0,0.03950841510611893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688332855807559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863416996266332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904659432902388,0.0,0.08021389759126324,0.0,0.0,0.6007269051284063,0.0,0.0,0.12358075202732853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22082708452503172,0.07553100123219111,0.0,0.09820457655963184,0.03396275435815148,0.0,0.12277050762869207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274228620135716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101719627501456,0.0,0.0,0.08141809254148122,0.05548823029855445,0.07388613417623988,0.0,0.0,0.05361620580753895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066703946241641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413206351396489,0.052871215182017005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638940634814754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988431989150097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04453471068969956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05936759194724552,0.0,0.05528313116979889,0.0,0.07035545310391553,0.16618941609518104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135874695104966,0.05750562031838436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06875461607735488,0.0,0.0,0.07409643883181574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208179231990873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226853202196333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040536231583340784,0.15980035172113488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200648227086023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987665194506892,0.0,0.0,0.04476701097641544
mentalhealth,TheMoondance,2020/01/03,"Feels like I'm losing myself and I don't know why I feel so much dumber, more boring, less creative, less energized, more awkward, less happy, and more apathetic than I did a few months ago. I don’t know exactly what the cause of it is, or if all of those things are concurrent with one another or they are each the result of separate factors in my life, but everything just feels generally more dull to me. My writing, which used to be one of my strong suits, now feels lackluster in comparison to what it was merely a few months ago. My social skills have been faltering, despite me being someone who is typically very amiable (or at least, I’d like to think so) and outgoing, and to the point where I wonder if I’m even gonna be able to make new friends this coming semester at college, which I was really hoping to do, since I was having so much trouble doing so in the second half of last semester. I feel like I have so much more trouble articulating myself now than I’ve ever had in the past. My memory has gotten notably worse, at least since I’ve been home for winter break. My thoughts come to me much slower, and I feel like I can’t think of things to say as well as I usually can. I just feel so empty, unmotivated, like I’m nothing. I feel like all of the things I like about myself are rapidly fading away, and I have no clue how to keep them from slipping away. For some context, I’m 18 and a first year student in college. The main factors I suspect of causing this are:

* ADHD medication. I’m currently on 25mg of Strattera, and ever since I started it, I've noticed myself feeling markedly duller. However, by the same token, I tried to stop taking it for three weeks before this one that I’ve been home since winter break, because I suspected it of causing the things listed above, but noticed my memory getting a lot worse, so I’ve been taking it for a little less than the past week. I was on Ritalin for almost all of last year, which I stopped taking because it made my OCD much worse, and noticed myself feeling more restricted than usual, but it was never quite as bad as it is now.
* Antidepressants. Currently on 40mg of Prozac. Once I got home from break, I started trying to take 25mg of it instead, and sometimes I just wouldn’t take it at all, because again, I worried that it was causing the problems listed before, but that was probably a stupid idea, since I got a lot more depressed in the third week of being home. Eventually, I met with my psychiatrist, who got bumped down to 20mg after I expressed that I was starting to feel apathetic about things, but said that the ADHD medication should stay the same. However, my mom and I talked and we agreed that it was probably better for me to go to 30mg since I was starting to feel more depressed anyway.
* Drinking. I’ve only been drinking since college started, which has been since August, and I don’t drink very often, probably about once a week if not once every other week, but typically when I do drink, I have more than the average person is meant to have, simply because I’m a bit of a heavyweight. However, college is the first time where I’ve had easy access to copious amounts of alcohol at any given time. I’ve taken note of the fact that when I have gotten drunk in the past three months, I tend to be much more socially apt than I have been when I’m not. I know they don’t call it “social lubricant” for nothing, but I didn’t think that drinking would somehow make me *more* awkward when I’m sober. There are numerous sources online saying that binge drinking can make you dumber, stunt your memory, and make you more depressed, but I don’t know if that only applies to people who drink religiously or it can apply to anyone who binge drinks regardless of frequency.
* Seasonal depression. Even though I was on the medications listed above this past fall and a brief portion of the summer, I remember feeling much happier than I currently do and just having much more motivation to do things. It isn’t uncommon for me to feel worse during the winter months, but it’s usually not quite this bad or prominent, and from what I can recall it’s usually more tolerable than this, but it would make a good amount of sense for that to be the case.
* College. I’ve really been enjoying myself at college so far, but during the last two months of last semester, I noticed the things I mentioned at the beginning getting worse without much of a way to account for it. Although the above factors could all make sense, I definitely noticed that the amount of work I was doing and the sheer amount of socializing I forced myself to do every day was starting to take a toll on me.

tl;dr: The title, basically.",9.123218990120748,6.8261075883644375,9.068759330406149,70.60882505488476,61.480790340285395,12.095729967069154,38.032958287596045,10.577609850970193,3.8651973435784863,3707,139,694,68,40,1218,332,911,0.12,0.7829999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.9751,8,0,9,0,0,0,105.0,1,3,3,10,37,31,1,2,43,0,75,16,0,15,10,127,146,57,0,12,28,1,14,7,1,5,7,3,4,1,58,24,10,4,29,9,1,5,15,15,1,11,37,17,81,16,107,97,49,100,0,6,0,0,27,27,0,17,70,496,139,9,0.03925491193050901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943535515099458,0.0,0.06959422184108496,0.04195156267267824,0.03930812393812457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02669468622103389,0.0411621978579618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02744794714397601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376256390279086,0.0,0.06555242356641655,0.09571771984767423,0.0,0.06680607758396713,0.0,0.0,0.03471777958595376,0.04285619689506282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04008365404331688,0.0,0.0,0.16130243126313573,0.0,0.06762926152137579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031341852975256275,0.0,0.0,0.02531617071733988,0.0,0.1352407924998459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30763895352676346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051854998216418896,0.07101663045453283,0.06614791270384532,0.0,0.03527978367180838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778784813027601,0.11217486770663164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667804160694198,0.0,0.0,0.030328247581491982,0.0,0.04101814259390008,0.0,0.0223094710799087,0.03292515769062912,0.09418721722583516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04178758369214816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750350926472773,0.03898898488365268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04431401744524237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03489156937808999,0.0,0.0,0.08629389196948632,0.1279919700266691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02772690520218398,0.1342457698893906,0.0393437343897585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04391620543264107,0.0,0.06674624470876782,0.0,0.03714394681271038,0.1572177511980087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863558183139256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04597487841657786,0.15666448094613522,0.0,0.2597118929728216,0.0,0.03027580806936665,0.03791263855532463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533229341630553,0.22345988706344475,0.0,0.12541560019278006,0.07980043274765615,0.059710258834460635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14989302089416182,0.027214413278255238,0.034275874965182994,0.0,0.0,0.0371085800831758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269703032484097,0.037561649225840835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350486164143069,0.0,0.0,0.05029540352430266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044468162929519016,0.0,0.03734041053029511,0.06243416308787403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597765503838724,0.0,0.0,0.1600617569021084,0.033260559491716205,0.0,0.03882411164477241,0.0,0.16670897225002296,0.04184051308569445,0.0,0.06563772818501337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17708885062605415,0.031551611260107165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825545344932926,0.07545888756359242,0.038567751663651006,0.031164015256611582,0.045779709652638605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05330301688144397,0.0,0.03834634499431477,0.0,0.0,0.033903640216413074,0.17293495839708478,0.06477882689924569,0.0,0.031158721924687906,0.15743961265433998,0.0,0.03529488015092936,0.0,0.035421452306316555,0.0,0.0,0.03784033428621174,0.04257027748620412,0.028578043409155207,0.03986526854420189,0.20002054449068726,0.05577112631397687,0.0,0.0,0.050557752520809976
mentalhealth,StoicHippie420,2020/01/03,"Why do people not care about the signs of severe depression until its too late? Recently I've been going through a really rough breakup, I've been telling the people I felt comfortable with how low I'm feeling. That im having a hard time eating and sleeping, I don't even want to go to work anymore and I love my job. I literally have been feeling so low at times i feel as if I was better off dead and the only response I've had was either ""I'm sorry"" ""what did you expect"" or not response at all. The whole situation got me thinking that honestly not many people show any kind of compassion when someone else is feeling so crappy, yet when someone goes off and ends their life, people feel awful for never listening in the first place. Why are people like this? It makes this world feel so cold and lonely... Please be there for people when they need you if possible. It can literally change so much.",5.615115562403696,6.079159468926555,6.152121212121212,79.61459167950694,67.30508474576271,8.922239342578326,29.085259373394965,8.841846274778883,2.1907672316384184,714,23,136,11,11,232,119,177,0.15,0.72,0.13,-0.6019,1,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,2,3,13,11,0,0,7,1,15,4,1,2,2,29,34,18,1,5,7,0,9,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,8,6,1,0,8,1,0,2,5,4,0,1,9,11,12,7,16,24,4,23,0,4,0,1,7,9,0,3,13,87,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168191114843275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912120946272045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623142613215236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246463638016812,0.0,0.1270651089880637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10345435703147404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229070181692356,0.1003401687641232,0.0,0.10638570688306406,0.0,0.0,0.07933442861707518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3644006991594084,0.0,0.11532866080646655,0.0,0.0,0.10216924759242316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365275635329835,0.0,0.09606645863346452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075989098569743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974416413186604,0.0,0.11919500840906765,0.0,0.0,0.1250806642811946,0.0,0.0,0.13549427542995704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484035318464568,0.05868182880701659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840793591127557,0.0,0.08017729494914427,0.12177714927238945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829790481040901,0.08906330590871991,0.09263963038158653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135241404192533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4996332084097622,0.0,0.12549398333747078,0.13184954192643006,0.0,0.13541093889446118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694836058064645,0.0,0.11859847965402034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13569508321089174,0.0,0.0,0.1350136186095578,0.12020114555129673,0.0,0.2035450832914344,0.0,0.0,0.13445823730100945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498528017800277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769644577488028,0.0,0.0,0.14007934557782745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708465853937617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21676912746427024,0.13410343847817394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744471402339865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,depravedheartattack,2020/01/03,"Anhedonia My anhedonia is ruining my life (term used by my psychiatrist). It makes me ‘not want’ anything. It makes it difficult to get anything done and keeps me from doing many things. I push myself really hard – getting all my schoolwork done and going to Meetups to force myself to socialize, but I get no benefit from it, no internal reward. Even at the Meetups, I feel like it is keeping me from properly socializing, as I get no internal reward for it. It all just feels like grinding, and after 2+ years of being treated by a psychiatrist I am growing concerned that I will never overcome it.

Does anyone have any advice? Any way to help me find a goal that I actually want to achieve, rather than just doing it for its own sake? I have tied diets (vegetarian 4 years, keto 4 months) and have tried exercise (completed Couchto5K running and TA’d a weight training class for a full year) with no positive results.

I feel like I’ve tried everything I could think of at this point, including getting professional help. What else is left for me to try?",6.718130287648053,7.289289269035533,7.524175126903554,70.35787013536381,64.93908629441624,10.830626057529614,35.7060067681895,10.686352973137794,4.0275316412859565,834,38,145,21,12,279,119,197,0.073,0.742,0.185,0.9819,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,4,5,9,0,0,5,0,14,4,0,4,3,28,31,7,0,4,5,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,15,6,2,2,5,1,0,4,6,2,0,0,2,5,21,7,24,26,5,17,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,10,99,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.12339977110418032,0.0,0.0,0.1235682920985186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719845910800445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08841879478290715,0.0,0.20811989365700756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325834401793181,0.0,0.0,0.10096233615574518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11065976857907484,0.25881040215097545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563515624922724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352093549502147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364769598616765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19181512881207746,0.2710138910077615,0.0,0.0,0.11557564262372585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303320566527359,0.0,0.0718660865522167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327694377022032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695174016499565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22479426212185669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13739142553171016,0.0,0.08931740972020462,0.18533547126849212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16881656038476855,0.12820337407658278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093348342509548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752825763363228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953884601455513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100895377370353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578055758028725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400967546411674,0.08102590039532387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575596174585639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921468884227478,0.0,0.0,0.14917037134723488,0.10037241128108523,0.0,0.15398554282233468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442945289154487
mentalhealth,mrjohncrane,2020/01/03,"Mental Health Awareness Clothing Brand. Hey. It’s Jay here, just thought I’d share something I’ve been working on over the last few weeks. This project has been something I’ve been wanting to do for a very long time now and I’ve finally had the opportunity to start.

All of the designs are created and designed by me, there for at the moment there is only 3 designs available however over the following weeks I plan to add many more designs to the collection.

If you could have a look at the site, maybe follow on social media as well it would be much appreciated.

I sincerely hope that people like the products that I have created and support the cause behind the brand.

https://i.imgur.com/ACGVq0X.jpg

From the beginning, our mission has been to promote awareness for mental health. Today, people around the world have helped us achieve this goal by purchasing products designed by forever forgotten apparel.

https://i.imgur.com/8MEiZc6.jpg

We consider it a privilege to be able to work alongside the uprawr mental health foundation. Supporting them by providing the foundation with donations that we raise by selling our products.

The uprawr mental health foundation is a birmingham based, self-funded mental health organisation that provides free counselling to people aged 18 to 35 living within the west midlands and is the foundation of choice for forever forgotten apparel. 

https://i.imgur.com/dDhxro4.jpg

As a brand we have many things in the pipe works that we look forward to accomplishing within the next few years however our commitments will always be the same; promoting mental health awareness.

Check us out at www.foreverforgottenapparel.com",8.803984593837534,11.573544132352946,7.118046218487398,67.09936274509805,61.720588235294116,10.475070028011203,36.84943977591037,10.608840637214634,4.702991036414566,1372,65,187,36,21,407,155,272,0.013000000000000001,0.8420000000000001,0.14400000000000002,0.9862,2,0,2,0,0,0,44.0,9,1,1,10,7,10,0,0,25,0,22,6,0,1,2,23,33,7,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,0,0,11,12,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,6,2,15,11,38,21,6,32,0,0,2,0,15,16,0,2,16,128,26,9,0.0879153642167882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07315262578135613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826331329254514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090313296452275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019326458881077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630698423043807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5606995263280484,0.0,0.0,0.058927815458170725,0.0,0.0,0.0873197935727665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166275574403605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042951006179746634,0.0,0.07763087728756267,0.07780233079668471,0.1476535277836548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17826476090755106,0.08832279998386304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5315880552970739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462790837079517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349898722261572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686359610490451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828483319136808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171489850659988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961864237613516,0.0,0.13536308506033307,0.0,0.0,0.06222694729053901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19953062693802034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05840706150832574,0.0,0.0,0.06979497894665193,0.051264155871440134,0.0,0.08333348560379635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115027168390171,0.0,0.0,0.0725393827206278,0.05185475962360536,0.0,0.14104080440337272,0.0,0.0790464706416833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920102966502683,0.0,0.0,0.062452552324579885,0.0,0.0,0.056614612137172324
mentalhealth,rhyzia,2020/01/03,"I’m doing horrible and I feel myself getting bad again. Just as the title says, I don’t know what to do with myself. I feel so intense and my heart feels extremely heavy. I can’t sleep and I feel really panicky, I can’t stop myself and I feel like I’m going mad like I’m not control of my own self at the moment. Idk how to get out of my head.",-0.8813131313131315,1.053155038961041,2.151861471861473,94.87318903318905,89.51948051948051,4.9806637806637815,16.347763347763347,6.42735559955562,-0.3554202020202021,266,6,63,3,9,94,48,77,0.214,0.7,0.086,-0.8783,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,1,0,2,0,5,3,3,2,0,17,17,7,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,6,0,2,6,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,6,13,2,8,17,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,39,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978060398090744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26570945164796256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5989322192638286,0.16924520208375107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24754649501563275,0.0,0.13463874817933144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431331970879088,0.0,0.0,0.28073393513413936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019696375452627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314799375890653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151767609044413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883966126239955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471439073330277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237076401980006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19806344858000974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AeroLewis,2020/01/03,"Am I a failure of biological evolution? I basically felt disgusted on many social activities that most people are engage in, such as having small chat, posting their life on social media, having romantic relationship, etc. People often disagree with me because I'm the only one who thinks all these things are hypocritical.

I wonder if I have some kind mental disorder, or maybe I am merely a failure of evolution? Since humans are social creatures, people like me should have died thousands of years ago.",9.412413793103447,10.140835758620694,9.777609195402302,55.953310344827614,59.229885057471286,11.557701149425288,36.94022988505747,11.20814326018867,4.763130574712642,409,17,54,10,5,137,66,87,0.21899999999999997,0.67,0.111,-0.9,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,3,0,10,1,0,0,1,11,14,3,1,2,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,8,3,8,12,4,7,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,6,3,43,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16050708860294793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037821915405786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879214390292964,0.0,0.2075212073707403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019402327145438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17385500929786615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885559053536764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789466459254836,0.08846135749360594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18357594088903004,0.1819085390342502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18247535654216976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269730437132464,0.13771142993928642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3765921475467761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734144228447593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19440076089027924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497824700326527,0.0,0.0,0.5537323196678846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12029445658657008,0.11602195346720848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963620289032812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660275018166726
mentalhealth,Umbra138,2020/01/03,"Fiance has depression, how can I help him? My fiance has depression and I am not sure what to do. He goes weeks of seeming fine and then all of the sudden it gets really bad. He has been prescribed an anti depressant, but he has trouble taking it regularly. He says he does not need to see a therapist. This morning he made a joke about not wanting to live anymore and I asked him if he is seriously thinking about killing himself or has a plan. He said he didn't think so because he wouldn't want to leave a mess for me. This answer was very upsetting and concerning. I feel so helpless right now and I just do not know what to do. 

​

Any advice would be most appreciated right now",2.5760920830993825,4.782292021897813,3.937518248175184,85.60269511510387,77.68613138686132,7.135092644581696,25.86692869174621,8.139509932561175,1.6858628860190903,545,21,109,10,13,179,91,137,0.24100000000000002,0.682,0.077,-0.9777,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,1,8,13,1,1,6,0,17,0,0,2,2,29,31,12,1,6,8,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,6,5,0,0,6,1,0,0,6,10,0,0,5,4,10,3,10,23,2,7,0,4,1,0,17,2,0,4,5,70,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634196553200999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18119855237060392,0.2032082687583696,0.1137252207559084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585172472569673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15634171830070567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13963385408331652,0.10194462232854208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4321165883417517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634807143386286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455880739658363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737314390706381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209378586501856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850202387629701,0.0,0.09190772868481624,0.0,0.0,0.17707722929118458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14767116119148455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15824136369480069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240022911231126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713472751558123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856347638964429,0.1590783422405625,0.132991617153458,0.0,0.0,0.13326427509085104,0.15224404277194029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576165732016787,0.0,0.12573956020124422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19417218855907567,0.0,0.21431427900690897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798600830941266,0.19727852716537367,0.0,0.13414545918679138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187986178100321,0.0,0.2032082687583696,0.0
mentalhealth,-witchy_ways-,2020/01/03,"Homeless PTSD help I don't know if this is the right place to ask, but I have a friend who has crippling PTSD. He says he cant work, which I have a hard time believing, but that's besides the point. His roommates have started using drugs, and they are close to being evicted. How would I go about helping him get into a new home? I'm going to help him file for disability/SSI, but I've never experienced this before. I can't take him in, I have 3 kids to support, but I don't want to see him homeless. Any advice would be appreciated!",3.2018243243243236,4.155949396396398,4.597826576576576,86.81133445945947,73.05405405405406,6.9914414414414425,25.58671171171171,7.1686216300943375,0.9803954954954954,417,13,91,4,8,139,77,111,0.027000000000000003,0.78,0.193,0.9631,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,5,0,15,1,0,2,1,15,27,7,0,4,5,0,1,0,1,2,1,1,1,1,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,4,13,2,9,23,0,12,0,0,1,0,16,6,0,1,4,55,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17478438616136147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163404005443368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721422653276366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15220057372926002,0.20151911804555447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20742611362747693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819032187017413,0.0,0.0934493546377351,0.0,0.20330571233976066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16022752072455307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3596674497301539,0.0,0.17941574585286293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829928909221458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13795138181800526,0.1727485147577441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18687540461831165,0.0,0.1690848312966366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4181662176103311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527493641330814,0.0,0.14224028390736018,0.0,0.0,0.14253190335867966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12660126214004874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029733926043746,0.0,0.0,0.13448389548323147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10429736823768747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448155853673035,0.0,0.0,0.10549895667652982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021553607802247,0.0,0.0,0.2541205150637807,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,XNekoGhostX,2020/01/03,I need help identifying if I’m having a ptsd episode or something else Ok so I’m sitting here and just having flash backs to my abuse and other awful events that has happened in my life but it also feels like I’m having a panic/anxiety attack so it’s hard to tell. I need help identifying so I can do what I need to do to calm down or fix it right away. Help would be greatly appreciated,1.3862195121951224,3.397926097560976,3.661158536585369,87.07027439024392,80.70731707317074,6.051219512195122,21.22560975609756,7.1686216300943375,0.5742878048780486,308,9,66,4,8,106,55,82,0.128,0.638,0.23399999999999999,0.895,0,0,1,0,1,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,1,0,2,2,9,1,0,0,0,12,17,10,0,5,5,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,4,7,15,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,3,3,43,12,0,0.0,0.2382886998890218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16083180305567354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385262561836874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287976454559155,0.18895440977536831,0.1546452230422165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16800599558046575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168991974425842,0.14367678397859104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22173028731270364,0.0,0.0,0.17784556276200808,0.0,0.18015977246748774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4044099641205808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205365784954874,0.09825475871364436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4473732572861341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23596542827307165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350929799000588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717513356152952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548283549595764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17578360426184614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286651246359794,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,allsmiles_99,2020/01/03,"Feeling low I don't want to get out of bed anymore, hardly want to shower, and hardly want to exercise.  This isn't me.

I'm trying to snap out of it, but sometimes it's all I can do to get my uniform on and go to work.

Is there anything I can do to reclaim myself?  Mentally, I've been so tired and unmotivated.",2.071343283582088,2.9655838955223888,4.782268656716422,84.64295522388062,75.71641791044777,7.151044776119402,26.832835820895525,7.554174236665415,1.3874202985074628,239,9,53,3,5,86,43,67,0.20199999999999999,0.779,0.019,-0.8818,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,1,11,16,5,0,3,1,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,3,5,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,3,6,0,12,15,1,5,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,36,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652611710939504,0.0,0.0,0.22010734546554525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524229737992158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27948702388570396,0.0,0.15201097081161155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4792062297860685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695496981188988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645374639713063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074206664063895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815964913357591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4732872079032601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19472340276297748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gigahyperprime,2020/01/03,"Depressed vs Stressed vs Anxious I was diagnosed with Depression, stress, and anxiety 4 years ago.

Lately, the doctor said i no longer had depression.

I have been having moodswing everyday for the last 4-5 years that i dont know how to describe my feelings anymore.

How do u distinguish between depressed and stressed ?

If i was in an arguments with my gf and i started to have lots of thinking and feelings and i started to think we are going nowhere and imagine about bad things that could happen to our relationship, and it started to get overwhelming. is it called depressed or stressed ? 

Thank you",4.8909174311926575,7.539519238532113,4.5747614678899104,81.67792201834864,72.21100917431194,7.662752293577981,36.588073394495396,8.548686976883017,3.446929541284404,483,28,81,9,10,147,73,109,0.317,0.6629999999999999,0.02,-0.9875,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,2,1,0,0,3,12,0,5,3,0,12,2,0,2,0,25,25,11,0,2,4,0,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,5,10,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,11,0,0,5,3,12,1,12,19,1,11,0,6,0,0,7,1,0,3,9,57,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951319604746328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450986759685824,0.13956814540520446,0.1225212136632694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315303804686396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615096332474549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863883519547377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5320359589790851,0.12539329334675015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645124225312707,0.0,0.0,0.14479118596294924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493385553008808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06454598920074013,0.0,0.07021219335329708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924844812865753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789586591349726,0.10070383241038576,0.13936160608996315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503163034015033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13263868172089052,0.0,0.0,0.11751744873977085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26233258850966784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5660712228389967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113741568112921,0.0,0.0,0.08207631527213533,0.15832241487222026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591149643478585
mentalhealth,felines234,2020/01/03,Need help moving. I'm about to be homeless I'm renting an illegal apartment and I need to move out.  My landlord is an ass and I just cant take it anymore.  I just know that he'll try to evict me for not cleaning to his standards.  Its killing me because he thinks that I need to spend an hour cleaning.  He even told me that I'm not sorry because i say it all the time.,-0.1473055555555547,1.891094325000001,1.7416666666666671,98.40777777777781,87.0,4.055555555555556,23.88888888888889,5.033348758259628,0.05997222222222254,286,12,67,1,9,94,51,80,0.14300000000000002,0.8079999999999999,0.049,-0.8617,2,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,4,0,3,1,1,0,1,14,14,2,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,2,2,3,1,0,0,1,1,10,0,8,11,1,6,0,0,0,1,7,2,1,0,2,39,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223505793888804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733459163939569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480849317099402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15027952391934507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207962311509816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24804901700995904,0.0,0.12321690809778264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4765877192284437,0.0,0.4987342999725965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17829638598478756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509785377627768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685738517889399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366116537922605,0.0,0.0,0.1307354239859051,0.0,0.0,0.21423697018344712,0.0,0.15222011158652654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kjlerlew,2020/01/03,"How can I stop thinking about my past? I keep thinking and dreaming about going past, changing my life and I do it so constantly that I don't even realize what is going on right before my eyes sometimes. This makes me really sad. I need some advice. How you deal with it?",1.6483333333333334,4.104466055555555,2.9977777777777814,89.60000000000002,82.8888888888889,5.822222222222222,21.962962962962962,7.1686216300943375,0.8427629629629632,213,7,42,3,6,69,40,54,0.115,0.885,0.0,-0.7143,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,3,0,13,11,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,2,3,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,10,0,4,11,1,8,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,1,4,30,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359949782512516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055021725676606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554792795522669,0.0,0.0,0.2609800994758337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489800876581717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595111579268002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274504652364557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146599103197029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17058146395332852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16120583937783575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17907220486656475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4610859155406024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15471368875714198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20624315282487168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388536965362833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019082130285552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3094921079970446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BihexualBun,2020/01/03,"You made it. You did it. You got through another year. Despite the hardships, despite how badly you may have wanted to give up, you did it. Against all odds you are here. Something within you made you keep going. You are brave, you are strong.
I’m proud of you.",0.3204411764705881,2.7315844509803964,1.00997549019608,99.17613970588236,96.64705882352942,3.334313725490196,20.100490196078432,5.148860815047168,-0.34243333333333403,201,7,42,1,8,61,34,51,0.0,0.7879999999999999,0.212,0.9072,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,11,0,2,2,4,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,3,1,7,15,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,0,11,3,6,9,1,4,0,0,0,0,12,2,0,1,1,31,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418977756712989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722428462707266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127822875505441,0.18530493840354045,0.0,0.2607764870193372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28981324080930576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6170434746337202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25101356704787786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19231606867898945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20996914680615714
mentalhealth,dawsoncody,2020/01/03,"Going to a walk in clinic Hey, I was talking on a helpline the other night about finally wanting to get some help, I’m a minor, and want to see a doctor without my parents knowing. I was told this was possible via a walk in clinic. Has anyone here ever tried that? What was it like?",1.1876436781609172,3.3399492586206883,3.438620689655174,87.6267816091954,82.27586206896551,5.2459770114942526,23.459770114942533,6.42735559955562,0.7731632183908044,219,8,43,2,6,75,44,58,0.0,0.873,0.127,0.7059,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,0,5,3,0,0,1,7,13,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,5,1,3,1,8,8,1,9,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,1,4,31,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19029667695040411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785615496864016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461792263156268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981318307504969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421894356862697,0.0,0.15467161127784046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18241935042463284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14956893494414225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296088759569627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553984581773321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3021952420919199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3068131820632926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168718123782196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21874738914844774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600551819606548,0.0,0.18477496569713855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3210474202519236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262347119498112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Piemanrz,2020/01/03,"Need some advice Not entirely sure if this belongs here. 

Hi, first time poster in this subreddit, didn't even know it existed but I've been doing a lot of thinking lately and I need some advice. 

For some background, I have been an athlete basically all my life. I've found most of my success in running, which is am incredibly mental sport. Ever since my sophomore year of high school, I've dealt with some pretty poor performances that have really taken a toll on me. It's now my sophomore year of college and I still just can't seem to wrap my head around the mental aspect of the sport. Every time I can stay focused for a race, it goes incredibly well, but if there's even a second where i stop focusing, my head is flooded with thoughts of self doubt and ways to drop out. While I have never given in to dropping out, these thoughts have completely destroyed a ton of my races, only further reinforcing these thoughts.

I'm not sure if it was caused by my running, or this started before my running started to go downhill, but I ALWAYS have to be doing something. Any period of time where I sit around idly, I find my head filled with some super dark thoughts. During my most recent down time from running (I took 2 weeks of after the season) I have never been more antisocial and sad in my entire life for what seemed like absolutely no reason. I didn't want to leave my dorm room or do anything with my friends, and I really just laid around, cried a little, and did nothing for 2 weeks, which also crushed my grades.

I'm very fortunate to have a Sports Psychologist on our athletic staff that I can go see free of charge but I'm not sure how to start the conversation or if that is even the right person to talk to. Any advice would be much appreciated, thanks!",5.244249241658243,6.184788040697678,5.57618301314459,81.72331648129425,68.30232558139535,8.308190091001013,28.328614762386252,8.456263369488248,1.9090153185035388,1402,46,271,20,23,447,186,344,0.109,0.764,0.127,0.8911,0,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,0,4,18,13,1,1,13,0,27,5,3,3,7,65,52,20,0,8,16,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,2,2,15,15,0,1,11,3,2,8,9,3,1,2,15,1,31,11,43,34,12,56,0,1,1,0,7,19,0,18,25,182,46,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27208144651861565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422090717768948,0.07722617029610147,0.0,0.0,0.12622929805396818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637552853547118,0.2478643478225337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897530813190899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534244242539874,0.0,0.0,0.09731054673163382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194850346675678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18390233091475952,0.08395284494269796,0.07819725355829793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482755431118369,0.07894497217907656,0.0,0.10176244910867577,0.07170553292366848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105493237532541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857525243581208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805989605085244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05100648739350183,0.0,0.1046948280064984,0.0982734269768675,0.0,0.0,0.13111027984748674,0.0453427567663796,0.09302098428352748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078904576247533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18706327693757235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822674927132802,0.13763633133894004,0.14316309878935907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905463844001986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058693251614104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810389678533007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442213281389404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891418070333686,0.09542514509122753,0.09163964595410948,0.0,0.0,0.07926006981302279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392966670601034,0.07395833478527275,0.16898326091841775,0.09682209346701924,0.0,0.0,0.07677420174169282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145042674147711,0.0,0.0,0.1970762680274336,0.0989241557906674,0.07411896852019867,0.0775941350841106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624197508434312,0.0,0.0,0.07459795010995174,0.0,0.0854478808394654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059469528443581686,0.0,0.2947262041451241,0.21647531522635846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311641374351513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657877845561914,0.054742320656062674,0.07366903593182242,0.1488947397747406,0.0,0.08344821717440276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593025731789097,0.0,0.0,0.119534456390417
mentalhealth,URSA_RAGER,2020/01/03,"Depression & artists block - recommendations?  Sorry if this has been asked here before; I'm new to this subreddit

For a really long time now, I've had an incredibly difficult time creating *anything*. I mostly work with pencil and pens, and I was trying to get into watercolor, so I have a lot of supplies; I was even just given some really good watercolor materials for my birthday recently. However, for a lot of reasons, I've been struggling with depression and I can't get myself to draw or paint anymore. I feel like I have a lot of ideas and inspiration from many sources, but I can't bring myself to pick up a pen or pencil. I feel like I have no motivation, and/or whatever I produce will be of poor quality and be a waste of a page.

If you've experienced this before, how did you deal with it and get back to creating?

Thanks",4.615662525879916,6.134190726708077,6.353059006211178,73.41087215320911,70.30434782608695,10.335610766045546,30.186853002070393,10.504223727775694,3.4488877846790884,661,27,123,20,12,228,97,161,0.138,0.733,0.129,-0.111,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,3,7,9,0,1,8,0,15,0,0,5,0,31,25,13,0,2,6,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,10,0,1,6,1,1,1,3,4,0,0,7,3,15,5,19,15,6,10,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,9,9,85,19,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744334043979663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15965955903448495,0.0,0.0,0.132481665418092,0.0,0.1505046139488042,0.0,0.0,0.12379194515024125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739825320714617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597438849338814,0.2773221846611713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633286839837776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628035152935461,0.2300236400678915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523330580504423,0.0,0.0,0.13503139832738315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18173895467289386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573038916062637,0.0,0.0,0.142471742793856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4106057216557437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321934642034586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15548586422907806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062695866528685,0.16552529831040724,0.15895893811963974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18021595795458809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683024809832233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821864774135812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877499955353828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930214780137566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720317938210452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Willy_BigD,2020/01/03,"I have some questions that need answered Hi I'm 22 years old and I wanted to describe how I feel on here to see if any one can help me figure out what's going on with me. 

I feel like people are always talking me 
I distance myself in social settings 
I feel like I cant be myself 
I feel mentally distant 
I feel like I'm living in a constant state of fear and worry 
My mind feels separate from my body 
I'm mentally confused 

If anyone has any clue about what could be possibly be going on that will be great. 
 
I'm plan on go im ng to a therapist and talking but I cant afford it right now.",0.1415848214285731,2.1856744531250034,2.8179017857142874,91.14406250000002,85.71875,5.2196428571428575,20.861607142857142,6.5431188927421005,0.3747794642857141,462,15,100,5,14,161,80,128,0.049,0.867,0.084,0.4497,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,2,2,0,12,1,1,1,0,24,28,7,0,5,3,0,6,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,9,0,0,3,2,2,0,1,0,7,17,4,14,22,1,17,0,0,1,0,6,8,0,5,7,61,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994077330395575,0.0,0.0,0.19604804387111704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079002804712303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601133822274527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15577029771977802,0.0,0.1150886156933663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622039923027865,0.43730639532691773,0.3089331600017781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24576397689041435,0.0,0.0,0.15892114794232098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661782717534556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15570209624210987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126693021707246,0.0,0.12728329782671746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.290529933138444,0.0,0.1455460700881753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688221332364392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512566688144861,0.0,0.09767685979840857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09993248177043852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250262338236096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16147617818387436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309964392963535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486546377227602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14693839290432978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23171771405396754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673642727978735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08502087112136289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14638695978245625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282510760900924
mentalhealth,P3dancing,2020/01/03,"Panic attacks are happening to me more often With all this news on WWIII and climate change, it really stresses me out and gives me anxiety...

I just turned 18 this summer and I'm really against killing and death in general but with all this news going on it scares me.

I'm falling behind in math class cause I can't focus and I keep panicking over this news and when I want to do something I enjoy I get this low just thinking about all this bad stuff.. idk what to do. Why can't we live in peace.. I don't want to deal with this",0.6131328671328653,2.9390448727272727,2.29909090909091,93.65017482517487,86.63636363636363,5.566433566433567,19.37062937062937,7.010146845296331,0.334678321678322,416,12,90,6,13,136,66,110,0.25,0.691,0.059000000000000004,-0.9687,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,0,5,8,2,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,27,17,8,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11,11,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,7,0,0,0,0,12,1,17,17,4,12,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,1,2,61,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16331646742312111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428715341087204,0.0,0.0,0.1782521783824471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21930928092923485,0.2258402427383058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22009504462463647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153780246059967,0.20479555249685366,0.12132920805055505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887852673324828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18975647002662965,0.23619100697930526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885123513882344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25048022433580697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735296348501199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137370715068394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435221620236132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24454788366200345,0.0,0.2443907856261099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367934278625969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23221183613583016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518395517058938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192638218133116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Twhite12ster,2020/01/03,"With arms wide open I see a lot of people posting in here with the thoughts of feeling alone. Just know that my messages are always open for anybody that wants to talk. If you need to talk about the things going on in your life or just to chat, I’m always here.",5.450555555555557,4.877114796296297,4.978148148148152,91.43166666666669,67.70370370370371,7.2,27.25925925925927,3.1291,0.54997037037037,205,5,46,0,3,62,41,54,0.038,0.9329999999999999,0.028999999999999998,-0.128,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,14,9,2,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,12,8,1,8,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,3,0,30,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925796225126123,0.0,0.0,0.4701169380705332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428379593156614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16054841780251158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525186334649071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995345718787468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401671456904793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094664619785966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19584646258970928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27055211982584204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22511193913109945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4541175583039277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876771245372675,0.0,0.0,0.224269473888522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666228693655851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jesus-christ-its-him,2020/01/03,"Am I to Genocide the entire population by suicide - might not be such a bad idea now knowing y'all a bunch of fucking coward ass freeloaders  
Starve me out?  
Force me on welfare?  
lie to me?  
Bully me?  
the fuck did I ever do to any of you? Give you bastards a new chance at life!  
seems I got shafted never mind fucked all on the belief system y'all was worth the time.

Oh, and by the way. It wasn't my thought path claiming me to think I think I'm god. y'all fruitcake shitstains in the medical system started in on me over that act. It is better for me to be dead anyway. now, I just gotta grow the balls to sit under falling rocks to leave this place. Y'all fucked me over, thinking Imma leave you fucktards peace as my parting gift. I might just suck your soulballs out your eye sockets and skull fuck you while you all beg me to stop before I erase your fucking pathetic code. Steal from me, the wrong move, hide things from me, definitely stupid, betray me. nuh uh, yup. the human race are the virus race about to be exterminated by their own pathetic greed. Y'all fucked me over. I honestly could not care less what the fuck happens to your worthless kind. get crushed by a black hole for all i fuckin care. pathetic losers",2.295964187327826,4.589949057851238,2.873078512396696,92.42355716253445,79.08264462809917,5.355647382920111,22.89325068870524,6.42735559955562,0.4365944903581265,960,31,198,8,24,298,149,242,0.299,0.579,0.122,-0.9949,0,0,0,0,0,2,29.0,0,14,1,2,8,23,13,0,15,1,13,14,3,0,5,26,37,4,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,6,4,0,1,8,2,2,4,4,18,1,0,5,2,39,5,34,25,7,30,1,2,2,10,17,13,12,3,9,127,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982421244257389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573141319826649,0.0,0.0,0.08737097928505505,0.0,0.0,0.09080989367217228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20937308314866698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197961880382994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287766581623844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7593894611648632,0.0536447493475228,0.09849760205793903,0.0,0.0,0.0821205664989814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09079736307458244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159103854100552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692280276544397,0.05642886186676975,0.0,0.0,0.21744126754975196,0.0,0.0,0.07252414593609031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343676640929482,0.0,0.21784917643967355,0.10367499228606912,0.0,0.0,0.10912991971198738,0.0,0.0,0.07919120820533752,0.09916655722514713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118971308492608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727612061986523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347372829849604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726756541113717,0.0,0.0,0.08584297712079997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231250606466224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821436025170513,0.19737476411200566,0.0,0.08151445586675203,0.05987206865586797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150061031225822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226171396948142,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,b3lb3l,2020/01/03,"short term affair but suffering?  I have not been in a relationship for 10 years because my last relationship breakup nearly did me in because he was cheating a lot. So a couple months ago I met someone who is amazing, and we are so compatible and there is such intense chemistry. But it turns out that only one month before he ended a 9 year relationship, and he is still really attached to his ex and still sees her and talks about her. After only a few weeks of knowing each other I stopped it because this was really triggering for me. I didn't want to end it, I did it because it wouldn't work for me if they were still seeing each other. But the problem is, I feel like I'm in love, and I can't stop thinking about him and it's been two months since it was over and I feel like I'm going crazy in pain. I can't stop thinking about him! That's weird because I didn't know him for long at all and how could I fall in love that fast? I'm not a kid, I've had long term relationships before, but nothing has hit me this hard. WTF is going on? It makes no sense.",3.621891891891892,4.236253801801801,4.799117117117117,87.01570270270273,71.7927927927928,7.541621621621622,26.06126126126126,7.554174236665415,1.1490645045045045,832,25,183,9,15,275,122,222,0.156,0.722,0.122,-0.7992,0,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,1,0,1,1,11,10,1,0,7,0,23,3,0,3,1,38,43,17,0,5,7,1,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,16,13,0,3,6,0,0,3,8,5,0,2,12,5,24,5,21,28,7,36,0,1,2,2,23,11,0,2,24,123,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414492024433034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237099597724289,0.0,0.18074640910105413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847965871477881,0.11751455612852126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18813340395650904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740155788713532,0.15174670675640248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071826194463015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513942129299656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673571974971154,0.08657179785407043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377345347709167,0.0,0.0,0.18797735544426508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029226447943196,0.19170953125597107,0.0,0.07089311083577908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543170626573968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019072067749412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196771204795578,0.16154839890515202,0.11301032318454693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162448482252244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607614621409686,0.0,0.0,0.4561005819431786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926434035818058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878544294707486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998772133064804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544479608219572,0.2663780923842045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536409624482111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361046125854548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552127353212555,0.10374750936636262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06264285710614435,0.0,0.08519178394141247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731899420148708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678594150166426
mentalhealth,tardiswanderlust,2020/01/03,"Trigger warning: Suicide, Rape, Abuse, Victim, Bully, Survival, Love. Use and abuse this post as per... You're probably right, this is the worst you're going through, and it's not getting better. Your loved ones care but aren't getting you/can't help. The worst part, you've been here before. 
One mississippi....
You're diagnosing yourself, and me, and you're right to. But here this is. Thanks to everyone, who was there, who beat you down when you already we're, thanks to the ones who've known, and who always have.
Two mississippi...
Things may/not get better. Could they?
Three mississippi...
You know now.",2.4468484848484837,5.39447301818182,2.395454545454548,90.94984848484852,87.0,5.1151515151515135,20.96969696969697,6.742157984588678,0.5294969696969698,472,15,89,6,15,141,71,110,0.22699999999999998,0.639,0.134,-0.8725,0,0,0,0,2,1,41.0,0,4,1,4,5,11,2,0,3,0,7,4,0,2,0,13,18,9,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,4,0,5,2,0,6,7,6,15,3,7,0,0,0,3,11,3,0,0,2,51,14,0,0.0,0.3803371296809944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17711789255235322,0.0,0.13355047963665587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657533760937485,0.0,0.0,0.2839018627932401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163642434543687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281477466183796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16290610033664346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533664910330019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25156693262661306,0.0,0.09121695674455672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758107360221064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820767402895661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289718551914142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262808246805665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17380797065028267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537165009103932,0.0,0.1730482481000895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741355760353789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755630823764841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955372622076664,0.0,0.0,0.10663036350764278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15678708294471025,0.0,0.0,0.1386221516425221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,erinwil,2020/01/03,How do people avoid triggers? Everything seems to trigger me. Even negative thoughts can throw me into a depressive episode.Are they not avoidable but just manageable?,6.0183333333333335,9.868467037037039,4.523981481481481,74.65041666666669,82.33333333333333,8.625925925925927,40.083333333333336,8.841846274778883,5.2636,138,9,18,4,4,40,26,27,0.217,0.7829999999999999,0.0,-0.6261,0,2,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,3,0,11,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,2,3,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,14,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4347190371452414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3333662052569755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4536144252043901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3499128722366594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4594828257269343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4006953953911275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fuckjucrtlrfr,2020/01/03,Does anybody else go to sleep every night thinking they won't wake up? It's so hard to fall asleep when you think you're dying for no reason. Sucks.,1.665053763440859,3.7172791612903278,2.143225806451614,98.1015053763441,79.96774193548387,4.133333333333334,16.78494623655914,3.1291,-1.0530731182795698,118,2,26,0,3,36,29,31,0.20800000000000002,0.792,0.0,-0.6774,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,3,1,0,3,5,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,2,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3467646589469579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923913800537577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27911507058534024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28151120027608845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18988856109029392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29930662554728743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135497543945308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34353184937785763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343621167695782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4281822588442853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MittySmallsAU,2020/01/03,"Travelling to japan and can’t take certain medication Hey all 

I’m travelling to japan next week and have just come to find out that I cannot take 2 out of possibly 4 medications into the country as they’re classed as narcotics. 

The medication in question is Norgesic & Panadeine Forte. 

Now due to the type of drug these are it’s illegal to take 

So I’m just wondering if anyone can provide tips or insights into what I should do as I will be experience some form of withdrawals and I’d expect an increase in pain day to day. 

I have two fused vertebrae in my neck and no cartilage in my lower limber discs causing crushing of the sciatica nerve 

I’m optimistic I’ll be fine but would like some pointers on maintaining control of chronic pain :) 

Thank you",4.796716141001852,6.38456355102041,5.6762399505256615,78.16886827458256,69.95238095238095,9.154978354978354,33.77179962894249,9.573946990214177,3.3355224489795914,610,30,113,14,11,200,102,147,0.092,0.797,0.111,0.4404,1,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,4,6,0,0,5,0,13,8,1,2,2,27,22,11,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,3,7,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,4,2,0,4,3,2,0,1,0,0,7,4,23,17,5,19,0,0,0,0,3,9,0,6,7,69,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17985805964541068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606920692704828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17052500478369878,0.0,0.14299201883246834,0.0,0.0,0.18618014334914829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141091165891653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19250422562190755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623772609409465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171857083504509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109792048324099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5016745997166768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765400651922047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532657687037055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18713707084928066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859550225608655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37442804629379584,0.0,0.0,0.15282805766495786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215529083813196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13315306156658405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18001704537574176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791975492258668,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fuckfuckandaway,2020/01/03,"Worth It? Hi Mental Health,

Over the last 18 or so months, I have been considering going back to school to start an MS in Mental Health Counseling.  My goal would be licensure as a MHC in NYS.

I’m a burnt out 37 year old sales guy looking for a more meaningful career. 

My question is, has anyone pursued this degree at nearly 40, and what has been your outcome / experience? 

TYA",3.686894977168951,5.528406479452058,4.672808219178084,83.2310388127854,73.24657534246576,7.606392694063928,24.495433789954337,8.344100000000001,1.530362557077626,295,9,57,5,6,96,63,73,0.0,0.932,0.068,0.5931,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,0,8,2,0,0,0,6,12,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,0,10,8,1,13,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,2,6,35,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156670546322874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17767547543349435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22602686609947106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313201211041788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287916479105594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4912246622897834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883496133106598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19403722738028115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4657203202055302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18443466039046927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424648760716043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25884677904608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338511073433224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16354968962592864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641426422758981,0.0,0.0,0.1487989150439114
mentalhealth,BlindLambda,2020/01/03,"I'm physically and mentally sick after a breakup on NYE This is definitely less intense and severe than some of the other posts on here but I need to share.


My girlfriend and I were long distance the last 3 months while I saved up money to move out with her to her new city. In August, we were inseperable and madly in love with each other, even talking about getting engaged. We broke up New year's Eve at 9pm, then rang in the new year by crying into each other's shoulders and talked about what we wish we would've done better so that the distance didn't kill our connection. People drift apart and it's a tragic waste of love but that's how life goes sometimes.


We were halfway through a trip, her family came for Hanukkah, my family came for New year's, and it was just me and her on Wednesday when we broke up. Now I'm alone with my extended family, with all of them asking where she is and why we broke up, because we were so good together and they were just positive we'd give them grandchildren.


I'm avoiding all of them. I can't eat because 80% of the food I eat, I puke up within the hour. Sleeping isn't even worth trying, I'll pass out from exhaustion for 20-30 minutes twice a day or so and that's all I can really get. Those naps are ended by intense nightmares. I'm having hallucinations, hearing voices, seeing paintings move, etc. I think it's because of sleep deprivation but I don't know how I'm supposed to sleep. I'm also intensely paranoid. I convinced myself that the death of Qassim Soliemani was going to cause my home city to get nuked while I'm in the airplane flying towards it.


I don't know why I'm feeling this way, I've never taken a breakup this hard. I just wish I could go back to August and move right away, struggle with money for a little bit, and eventually find myself and be happy with the girl of my dreams. The worst part is that I know she feels the same way.",5.743452661328309,5.483898455958553,6.2320018841262375,81.63258125294395,67.03108808290156,8.883466792275081,29.721620348563363,8.296473431620573,1.939429015544042,1508,47,307,18,22,490,204,386,0.157,0.6920000000000001,0.151,-0.0532,0,2,0,0,0,0,36.0,10,0,4,1,18,20,2,2,17,0,22,12,4,3,4,64,53,28,2,4,7,0,3,0,1,0,3,3,1,1,17,35,3,1,7,2,3,10,6,11,0,1,12,7,42,9,52,38,12,61,0,5,1,2,30,23,0,2,25,199,59,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936477114646138,0.0,0.07230873378125402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453036846804468,0.0,0.08495244008743398,0.06952729529265707,0.0,0.16535733230575125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996902315194293,0.09871507459803328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20683247603485425,0.0,0.09288610917794107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219290507901889,0.0,0.09932197647391318,0.05831333300567916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092530915524407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18504419152360535,0.0,0.0,0.08008516280468758,0.0,0.1008420514566466,0.11944293679975106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25571940612511845,0.0,0.09143800163055224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264211898296545,0.0,0.10933606028736548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14172194336133745,0.0867389741454563,0.1027753865929043,0.07583989324906472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962536281869002,0.08099843922618588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190975994642183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069849749261584,0.0,0.08904535383332204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003618437017567,0.0,0.14907718020303085,0.07370425857005666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06386622504344308,0.0,0.09062445939288764,0.0,0.0800187356298974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632149177016323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112195745563366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217227399494956,0.2883060222773466,0.0,0.06704518457036261,0.06973737448988558,0.3493122782090165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791590299671413,0.0,0.06268574982242915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659723680003682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05792528117925109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721807110054091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205292611272049,0.0,0.0,0.10214871103582313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714554969691515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942755902023591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452647568955796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14535212570802988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05793739882522314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061389153366034524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354216108846038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631797294263197,0.0,0.20795676596215926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423167818625095,0.0,0.0,0.17468228657180335
mentalhealth,jeremiah_808,2020/01/03,"Ability & Withdrawal Hello. I’ve been on abilify for nearly 2 year’s now, I think.  I’m currently getting a 200 mg shot every month & and am determined to go even lower in the coming months. 

Shortly after turning 19 (I’m now 22) I went through psychosis, was then put on monthly shots of invega for a year. I’ve haven’t had a episode or anything remotely close to it since coming out of the hospital. 

I can actually recall I think all my delusions which I heard is uncommon & I never really heard anything that wasn’t actually there like voices. 

So I was on 400 mg of ability. I’m now on half that & have been told by my psychiatrist it’s equivalent to 10 mg a day. 

My question is for anybody here that was put on the 400 mg dose of ability & got off of it, how did it go? Any tips?

Thanks for taking the time to read.",1.8172587719298257,3.781106350877192,4.242452485380117,83.68192434210529,79.05847953216373,8.017690058479532,25.89217836257309,8.841846274778883,2.132066959064327,650,26,134,16,16,227,102,171,0.013999999999999999,0.8859999999999999,0.10099999999999999,0.8992,2,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,8,0,14,1,0,1,2,12,32,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,8,5,0,0,3,1,0,7,3,0,0,1,13,3,10,2,25,19,1,32,0,0,0,0,5,11,0,2,15,79,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.2420168714869532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6717826369536187,0.0,0.08432587091675994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040867868164144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136341416425332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997127691783669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819024027812154,0.0,0.1044773536930064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06478612576635312,0.0,0.14094682087128185,0.0,0.09917603146472438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06058129947703645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969325510279777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563828029364008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24931328404345984,0.13891104536209248,0.0,0.12403593723749327,0.0,0.07943910016733728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257605049882088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323435779841667,0.0,0.0,0.114164731656811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891143676866568,0.0,0.0,0.0723067852307881,0.0,0.0,0.11848958850830946,0.0,0.0,0.1348789817303954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11495144898740818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15970693484128906
mentalhealth,isthisjenny,2020/01/03,"Mental Health Survey UK Hi all Participating!
I am a Sixth Form, second-year student who is completing A-Levels in Sociology, Biology, Psychology as well as completing an Extended Project Qualification (EPQ) at Shrewsbury Sixth Form College. My working title for my EPQ is “what limitations are there for accessing mental health treatment in the UK?” I started this project as I never really heard/saw anyone else talk about this topic and I was very curious to see what actual limitations there could be. So far, I have found funding issues, age restrictions as well as demographic differences. Any data that is provided I will conduct a thematic analysis- I will look at common themes and patterns and mention them, I will also do a chart or a graph to show what types of treatments are most popular (I.e. 25% received CBT, 35% use medication) etc.

Although I have gathered numerical data and looked over different articles,  my research project would be much better with anecdotes from real life people who have accessed mental health treatment here in the UK; I could include how useful they found them, how long they had to wait for treatment, what kind of treatment they accessed etc. as a comparison to statistics. If you are transitioning from young people services to adult services, then your experiences would be especially useful too.
 
If you would like to participate, then feel free to comment down below or message me telling me as much as you feel comfortable with. 

All information will be kept anonymous. 

All information that you share with me will be only seen by my supervisor and myself. The information will not be shared with anyone else, and all information will be deleted after I finish my project. If you ever change your mind  about sharing your experiences, please contact me and I will delete them as soon as I can as well as not using them in my project. If you ever want to know more of what I did with your experience, or if I used it then also feel free to contact me. 


Basically, I need your help with telling me about your experiences with therapy/medication and other stuff to do with mental health treatments. I would use these for my project.


If you are happy to participate, please state that you agree with the statement blow when answering. 

To take part you must be 18 years of age or above.

I am not sponsored in any way to do publish this survey: this survey will strictly be used for my research purposed. 

PARTICIPATION CONSENT STATEMENT:I agree for my information to be used in a research project, this includes allowing my information to be referenced in the final report, as well as being used in data analysis and thematic analysis.",9.47892177589852,9.411705627906981,9.102119238900636,63.50350443974632,59.31712473572939,12.050029598308669,40.48448202959831,11.446984129993634,4.9168172346723065,2154,102,338,53,25,694,223,473,0.004,0.871,0.125,0.9944,1,0,0,0,0,0,56.0,0,15,7,4,20,15,0,0,12,0,47,6,0,12,8,81,72,43,0,15,13,0,3,1,0,14,6,0,0,1,19,18,0,5,14,1,3,1,4,0,4,0,7,7,57,17,68,37,13,35,0,0,4,0,46,14,0,11,19,260,76,19,0.0,0.0,0.06719964225038072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013826526014617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365741029940612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630020095588182,0.14111506725086242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06090308199247457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284715110061535,0.0,0.14440156037004367,0.0,0.0,0.10996183882222646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143892831623221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505118114065395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535992684688502,0.0,0.12457973173928312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26944205570572977,0.0,0.0,0.10445649873612807,0.0,0.0,0.07543525108454825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100784993938368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733051671570596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29278949247224434,0.0,0.0,0.04615692818617099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187431914898673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170945764122763,0.03784490281885482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048639457968371415,0.03364262687066006,0.0,0.0,0.060940942191356325,0.11565392718796233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649045834683509,0.06937149258651948,0.277587887284348,0.0,0.06953126251377315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124338403858532,0.05106050083081675,0.05311082803184418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05237285956873692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07457112808850387,0.0,0.09548085522918873,0.0,0.0,0.1511801875393478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838033940039854,0.04411493363366615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054874313751500564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04874106930661395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883082426869728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05177585720370202,0.05534888436086604,0.12037731883086546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5352740250419316,0.0,0.0568185847867018,0.04061675114627116,0.054659664840079385,0.0,0.0,0.24766180388060224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05013255287894191,0.0,0.0,0.19567112408807447,0.0,0.0,0.08869008859010931
mentalhealth,moon134340,2020/01/03,"Anxiety and Guilt Although I’ve been going to therapy and the psychiatrist sometimes I feel like my anxiety isn’t as bad as others. Like my anxiety doesn’t give me panic attacks. I get anxiety attacks where I breakdown and cry. And to combat the social anxiety I take xanax when I feel like one is coming on. But I don’t have panic attacks. Which makes me feel like, I’m not valid. Like I’m too sensitive or dramatic.",2.0778580990629187,4.5811823012048185,4.3560642570281125,80.25757697456493,81.40963855421687,8.02623828647925,27.29451137884873,8.841846274778883,2.7058712182061586,333,15,61,9,9,115,50,83,0.35100000000000003,0.523,0.126,-0.9607,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,12,3,3,2,0,6,1,0,1,0,12,17,10,0,0,3,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,7,0,1,1,3,10,5,5,16,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,6,37,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5224366342448956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4661562505081132,0.0,0.0,0.11404296160738828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176560812798015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003246124656675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207184788147604,0.2927295461064043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136014515623561,0.13102499808250548,0.07762453363053436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33364322015686204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117170140784854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255368647937456,0.0,0.0,0.3205066761770509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13923144106719196,0.0,0.0,0.13508628462103325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269509447189064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619711365089922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dinohno,2020/01/03,"Confused So I've been having a lot of problems recently with not assocating me with me, if that makes sense? I don't really link my face to me in my head and it just feels weird to look at myself in the mirror. Is this normal in depression?",2.6237999999999992,4.058050379999997,4.625,84.1675,75.2,8.200000000000001,22.5,8.841846274778883,1.4440000000000004,189,5,40,4,4,65,42,50,0.204,0.7959999999999999,0.0,-0.8677,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,4,2,2,1,0,13,7,3,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,7,0,9,6,1,5,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,3,1,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213178411714713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18863140766456385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38286934432288144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132782069765307,0.0,0.0,0.3171640576736261,0.0,0.0,0.249021849473093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36552165066152736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3569700477790677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389931348752685,0.0,0.3683538184578818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xXxL1B3R4LL0V469xXx,2020/01/03,"Lack of motivation 14m
This is going to be a short post but I would reall appreciate some advice. I’ve losing motivation to do anything. I’m losing motivation in anything I used to like to do eg. Play games or build relations with other people. I’m scared that one day I will not have the motivation to do anything and at that point I might as well end it. I’ve got a few other problems but I don’t think that they are linked. Nothing diagnosed. Idk if this is some teenager thing or if it’s a legitimate problem but nothing really seems that fun anymore. Every day the same things happens. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Sry for bad format on mobile",1.5233755656108627,4.211331138461539,3.8215837104072414,81.28400452488691,87.61538461538461,6.135746606334842,23.031674208144803,7.510576382923642,1.4475113122171952,528,20,97,10,17,181,87,130,0.155,0.622,0.223,0.8618,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,6,1,11,0,1,5,0,14,1,0,5,0,27,22,9,0,7,8,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,12,2,0,0,7,2,0,1,2,6,1,1,1,0,6,5,12,15,5,10,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,8,4,65,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957701642899183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291457034649956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15008596051007644,0.0,0.0,0.3736131702572391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636034472646862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19520010916185693,0.0,0.0,0.15360419890380791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403995035061386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275082231509807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860084891740502,0.0,0.1210382834579706,0.1668499347048677,0.0,0.0,0.1338270963972697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393577248512788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3386155114112308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605449858247003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29042448920215297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255008783007262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491824577270624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430626883495466,0.0,0.14493932352345634,0.0,0.0,0.2896187622941552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969505653905932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15151506299397702,0.0,0.0,0.13777181653766385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20108358780385224,0.09697084690851207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13070685818008154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607042975099662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21501138671638545,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DancingInTheDark18,2020/01/03,"Made a phone call So I have BPD, PTSD, Depression and anxiety one of my anxiety is phone anxiety I despise having to call people and can end up having full blown panic attacks but today I made a phone call to complain about something and did it all by myself! 

My dad was in the room with me but I did it by myself didn’t have a panic attack and was calm (did end up falling up the stairs on the phone call) but the guy sorted it out and apologised to me! Brilliant bring on 2020!!",1.9109090909090904,3.781606151515152,3.598989898989899,88.8518181818182,78.3939393939394,6.420202020202023,22.11111111111111,7.3871296695380915,0.8062202020202021,375,11,78,5,9,125,57,99,0.23800000000000002,0.6759999999999999,0.086,-0.9241,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,8,3,2,7,0,12,0,0,2,1,14,15,9,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,7,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,0,1,8,0,10,1,15,7,2,15,0,1,0,0,11,10,0,1,3,59,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33670546616196845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33381476834455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847800718924932,0.0,0.5992421037518814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636381797162935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598886017969209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452690810959519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27764705290644104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941662493381756,0.0,0.0,0.3442725322602808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171242277220624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17149981694171118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294694781716445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13906690802325086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luwellin,2020/01/03,"I made a list of all the mental problems I have. My name is Lucas and I'm 15 and from England. I haven't got the happiest family ever, and my dad used to do some borderline abusive stuff to me when I was very little which I was too young to remember but my mum brings it up sometimes to make my dad feel guilty. For example we were driving through a forest on holiday and I was crying in the car and my dad got so fed up that he put me outside and drove off with me lying on the floor looking at them abandon me. My mum said she could see me in the car mirrors and I looked terrified until my dad turned around to pick me back up. He also apparently used to drag me by my arm across the floor when he was angry leaving me with carpet burns. Once as a baby I was crying in bed in the night so he strapped me to my high chair and left me downstairs alone. I've also had lots of red handprints all over my body from slaps. I have no memories of this apart from the carpet burns. My mum has never forgiven my dad for doing things like that which is why she brings it up sometimes. Me and my dad have a pretty decent relationship nowadays. I know it's nothing compared to what some people experience growing up, but I wonder if it has still affected me in some way. I'm sorry this post is so long and I don't expect anyone to read any of it but I felt like I needed to write down everything that has been going wrong with me because it seems like too much going on at once. This way I will hopefully be able to handle it better by breaking down my issues.

My social anxiety is the issue I've had for the longest period of time. I hate large groups of people, I struggle talking to strangers, I can hardly talk to people on the phone, and I hate doing public speaking such as school presentations. I feel like this issue has massively affected my social life because I don't make as many new friends as other people and I'm too scared to join clubs with strangers. Even some of my family that live far away I react to them like strangers, same goes with my brother's gf. I'm scared of them basically.

General anxiety. I worry about getting a good job. I worry about what people think about me, like I feel I get on people's nerves or I sometimes feel like they think I'm being rude. I worry about my friends secretly hating me and talking about me behind my back. I worry about failing all the time, especially with school work because I'm useless at maths and chemistry and physics. It gives me dread to think about those subjects. I also worry about being lonely when I'm older, I feel like I won't find friends as an adult and I feel like I won't be able to find a partner.

Panic attacks. I started getting what I assume is panic attacks. Whenever something really stressful comes up my body is too weak to handle it. For example I had a class test for maths (which is my worst subject) and that morning I felt like my body was not getting any oxygen, like I was suffocating, even though I could still inhale fine. I also see stars in my eyesight, and hear my heartbeat in my ears, and I freeze up or my arms and legs will shiver when I'm really stressed out. 

My sexual problems. I have developed incest kinks thankfully not to my parents or brother but I have it to my cousins who are all much older then me by the way. I also get aroused by my own self. However in real life I've never had a gf or bf. I'm pretty sure I'm gay anyway but I'm too scared to come out yet. There was also a period of time at school where I kept getting groped by some people from my year group. They did it as a joke but they would grab my crotch and slap my bum but I never fought back and I never tried to stop them so I guess they saw it as acceptable and I don't blame them for thinking that. It wasn't just me they did that too though. The first sexual encounter I had was at 9/10 years old with someone who still lives only 2 minutes from my house. It basically involved me getting naked, lots of kissing, him putting his penis into my mouth and me doing that to him as well as some stuff with my anus. At the time I had no sexual drive and I would accept money from him in exchange for doing those things, so basically I was selling myself. I don't think I'll ever tell anyone that in real life. I remember my mum found some of the money (literally only a few £) in my trouser pockets and I refused to tell her where I got it from and cried, but that was the closest I got to saying about it. She probably thought I stole it from a friend or something. The person is also under 18 still so not an old man or anything, it's just they were much more sexually developed then me at the time.

Intrusive thoughts. I get thoughts about being raped by authority figures from my life. For example I've imagined several of my teachers raping me which has made me feel ashamed to look at them because of the horrible thoughts. I also get intrusive thoughts about hurting myself. Sometimes in my room I'll grab my pen knife and get tempted to stab myself. I have always resisted my urges until now, when I got so upset with everything so I cut my thigh through my trousers. I cut deeper then I meant to because I could see the layer of fat under the skin.

Attention issues. This affects me at school and it's really irritating. I'll be in lesson, I'll actively try to listen to the teacher and then i realise I've not actually been concentrating for the whole time they have been talking which leaves me unaware of the tasks I've been given. Then I have to ask the teacher again and sound like an idiot, or keep asking my friend what I'm meant to be doing. I also always get told off by people for fidgeting because I can't keep still when they talk to me. I shake my legs up and down all the time and my parents and gran hate it but I can't stop. Honestly this is a really annoying problem because I really want to focus properly but my brain phases out too easily. 

My mood problems have been around for a long time too. Most of the time I would say I have a low mood, I don't know if it's strong enough to be considered depression but I would define myself as feeling sad. I have weeks where I just feel like nobody in the world understands me and then I think of all the stressful things that I have to do in the week, like going to certain lessons or tests I have to do or whatever and I just get so sad about it because it feels like I always have too much going on at once. Then I'll get sudden urges to burst out crying for no obvious reason. I was watching TV with my family last night and I just teared up randomly and felt really upset and emotional. I've had to leave lessons at school before because I had to hold back tears and couldn't talk without crying. Then what's even more weird is I sometimes get bursts of joy where life seems great again. I'll start loving my friends who I normally feel don't really like me and who also get on my nerves a lot. Then I feel like I have a good sense of humour and my energy level is right up and my stress goes way down. I don't know how to make the happy feelings stay and I don't know why they appear so suddenly in the first place but they help to make my life worth living.

Health anxiety. Almost every night I worry about my health. I always have to check my throat and mouth in the mirror for marks and spots, I check my heart rate multiple times a day because it gets very high sometimes and I can feel palpitations in my chest and think I have a heart problem. I also can't stop checking all my moles because I get scared of skin cancers developing. I also get paranoid of lung cancer from smoking and bowel cancer because sometimes I get pains in my gut. I keep swearing to myself that I will cut out cigarettes and energy drinks but I can't stop. I'm honestly scared that I'm going to die. When I was younger I used to run into my parents room crying because I looked up whatever symptoms I had and convinced myself I had some horrible disease. I still do this actually but I try and keep it to myself rather then telling anyone about it. Like I'm pretty sure I had a thing called precordial catch syndrome where it hurt like hell to breath deeply in the left part of my chest but at first I convinced myself I had a clot in my lung and I thought I was going to die.

If anyone has read all this, thank you so much. I don't expect you to leave a comment or anything but I just needed to get this all out.",3.7945818815331016,4.8369496428571415,4.883821138211385,84.98353658536588,71.73519163763065,7.713821138211383,26.311265969802555,8.04285021948737,1.4987558652729387,6663,212,1362,91,123,2191,552,1722,0.192,0.687,0.121,-0.9994,7,4,4,0,0,1,112.0,1,2,16,10,93,105,16,17,60,0,117,50,28,16,19,261,257,137,2,24,41,16,23,19,10,9,15,8,5,5,72,76,3,12,56,7,8,22,30,53,1,3,63,42,251,50,216,173,35,203,1,10,10,7,101,94,1,34,99,934,323,16,0.053513071138549896,0.0317021193885164,0.05222103807790951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026792805399073544,0.027711701500845537,0.0,0.2567663019345496,0.08905432406004632,0.0,0.0,0.03639072341561439,0.0,0.06140602942391081,0.0,0.0,0.07483516716190479,0.0,0.04403669793786552,0.04763797874322893,0.05002749778093789,0.06087884381788136,0.025138645938624943,0.08229649708158841,0.0,0.2120369645919924,0.0,0.02276784105748955,0.0,0.0,0.02366398136422401,0.0,0.0891614375648896,0.0,0.029869142612907164,0.027321414376247032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046096772414718434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408874935885431,0.0,0.17634478759638114,0.01725575192922254,0.0,0.02304536487908088,0.0,0.055538119217463794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026211218538411574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030097501184203238,0.0,0.027646653715861003,0.0,0.053017318189827516,0.048405636525959306,0.02254353521703064,0.0,0.0480940977965825,0.02617302596339233,0.07567104139208446,0.0,0.18940471658872468,0.13380412049829035,0.07707141039479448,0.0,0.04890997754960981,0.06827728645992823,0.0,0.029337160205280412,0.12403219805019365,0.0,0.2795837099933212,0.025667306999986983,0.0912381346117387,0.04488422516055211,0.10699822875395117,0.029499174923994044,0.02947534048804928,0.0,0.0,0.028482829649250425,0.023968600350886292,0.10566615780796168,0.0,0.05688189223625757,0.030156560192345888,0.0634132469545735,0.017934341788521303,0.056539497729359185,0.0,0.026575277068411687,0.0,0.030873449645711988,0.05728684943748025,0.0,0.0,0.1117074862725714,0.02655173295133802,0.0951297528100794,0.0,0.0,0.05881876882006781,0.021810147636189967,0.0,0.11332523131645,0.058142108369167424,0.0,0.1133935941440586,0.2483659433323103,0.026817077834519792,0.07087953333037696,0.04735738399947315,0.08987500429004346,0.0,0.0,0.06824234915469288,0.0241488179961652,0.05063536180322571,0.07144078104157897,0.02712692746292666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026964294649500647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834566144928818,0.039679264187572436,0.0825451588764827,0.025841628783332102,0.0,0.07532758828301025,0.026215723907480098,0.025673617506474174,0.0,0.056152966292423,0.08548451142727029,0.0,0.040699101992206256,0.028470840321732117,0.06278605894580197,0.08912989898153245,0.0289747206161679,0.0,0.14839690241376485,0.023362774811403017,0.02795488483159251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02562536488579799,0.08166304746637561,0.028848070793635067,0.1280119549536852,0.0,0.0537954169036684,0.0,0.0,0.05352755253558852,0.060909590457894035,0.11998645278149192,0.027510174859920872,0.0,0.028726505847496295,0.06061987785020419,0.02284993518093423,0.02545159251137352,0.04255574202677758,0.1339397991010694,0.13539521229682588,0.06396448400512196,0.04871629015414165,0.02791290198233261,0.030227269248223807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054549836965796135,0.02267072575960689,0.04119697657456749,0.18524028488599129,0.029951750979971808,0.0378768271821312,0.028518906846508905,0.12820682321069385,0.08947864725707151,0.12259808437482896,0.027971740443713627,0.06125966356354093,0.0,0.0,0.05043543624689985,0.027810285350969726,0.0,0.1290353386261764,0.07015917428877005,0.04926764619652594,0.0,0.0,0.07110341327328189,0.12001155327866085,0.052576320692922805,0.1274502030478726,0.15601951060803484,0.0,0.0,0.02556701636258373,0.0,0.05449779391924594,0.029103427366766643,0.0,0.027854497147523114,0.0,0.06932716779374479,0.0,0.044153888031486864,0.015781697916690797,0.08495237008269592,0.04292495780865297,0.0,0.024057338807520603,0.0,0.048287223276776106,0.02987271643212357,0.0,0.02579234547958265,0.029016321467486623,0.01947907656323278,0.16303536398245666,0.0,0.07602830074361598,0.029254071333680333,0.0,0.034460663318271065
mentalhealth,8112769,2020/01/03,"Can other people see when I am depressed? Hello,

I (25|M) have been suffering from depression for about 3 years now (only a self-diagnosis). I would like to know if other people can somehow see that. I am asking because I got quite a few comments from friends and colleagues over the years like:

- You are looking so ""motivated"" lately. (At the onset of the illness.)
- Has anything changed as of last year? You were funnier back then.
- Is everything alright? (Repeatedly from a friend of mine whenever she is drunk.)
- Certain people always asking if everythnig is alright whenever I meet them (this was not the case earlier)
- Well at least he's smiling for once.

I could recount many more similar occurences. I would be thankful if someone here could tell me their experiences. Thanks in advance.",3.971785714285717,7.067127392857145,4.5953571428571465,77.70089285714289,78.64285714285714,6.928571428571428,31.607142857142854,8.07648339933343,2.9221428571428567,625,32,98,12,16,199,104,140,0.066,0.723,0.21100000000000002,0.9598,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,2,2,3,8,13,0,0,7,2,18,2,0,1,1,13,27,8,0,7,4,0,0,2,2,2,1,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,1,3,1,0,4,3,15,10,15,18,3,15,0,3,3,0,14,4,0,4,12,75,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485672804084072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348143846529952,0.0,0.2805599728447403,0.0,0.0,0.1153820599199816,0.0,0.09147136408322937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15873695517250902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396113947641115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584821240903905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13485862146140407,0.14678134584520428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318622868114952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001167951710838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246560848985313,0.12231382139765527,0.16926714891557765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661735078911828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600734536758787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521309353844973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15980233050831866,0.0,0.1141226271173764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120850988822099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15960061760933386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391467984811985,0.0,0.15653877106692102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271400426888714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311535782411709,0.2762986375922328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491632845819618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21318773612727296,0.0,0.0,0.28988905682795696
mentalhealth,Fraestro6,2020/01/03,"My FOMO is starting to eat me alive Hi everyone. I need to vent on something.

I have hardcore ""FOMO"" as I heard it, or, ""Fear of Missing Out"", that means I'm always afraid of missing stuff that could be happening while I'm not here.

I think nearly everyone can feel this way sometimes, frustration when you miss out on a great time. But I think in my case it can be unhealthy.

For example, everytime there's a night out with my friends, I'm one of the few that goes to bed at 5-6 AM. So everyone sees me as this ""party hard guy""... Well in 90% of those parties I've wanted to leave since midnight and go to my goddamn couch, and I go through the party with a hole in my stomach and I'm pissed when everyone orders an other drink. But I just can't leave because I don't want to miss out...

Recent example, a few days ago I was with my family for Christmas. I was SO HAPPY to see them because I see them like once or twice a year... But while I was with them I saw an Instagram story where my friends were having drinks. Just that. Not a specific party, not a special occasion, just having casual drinks like we do at least twice a week. And it was enough to, again, put a hole in my stomach and I couldn't enjoy my afternoon with my family and play with my nephew (which I love to do). Of course when they asked me why I was feeling so bad and looking so depressed I couldn't tell them, that would sound so ridiculous...

So I don't know what should I do to fix it...

Am I the only one with the same problem?",2.5211538461538474,3.708853166666668,3.927435897435899,90.05923076923081,75.02564102564101,7.2512820512820495,24.85897435897436,7.793537801064563,1.1249782051282056,1156,37,258,16,24,382,159,312,0.139,0.7170000000000001,0.14400000000000002,0.6698,0,0,4,0,0,0,51.0,1,1,5,0,17,24,3,2,15,0,27,8,3,0,0,46,56,25,0,9,11,1,3,2,2,2,0,2,2,1,16,19,4,0,6,5,0,3,8,12,1,4,8,10,41,12,40,41,5,34,0,5,5,1,16,14,1,2,17,182,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09898836834281853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291805821647127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043960077244374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932394569275313,0.13614551120137325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915909409679128,0.0,0.0,0.07201765795212313,0.0,0.09618086838817316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32818110371839176,0.0,0.11426588572699405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538455461090873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4268203777637059,0.0,0.0,0.21054433320586974,0.12565935323377894,0.11292701661579617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17255132184072253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692882152395835,0.0,0.0,0.12311613531881417,0.0,0.11057046703746763,0.09874906417263084,0.11887437253397792,0.1000340332163688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613706952821195,0.0,0.0,0.2364839787848365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911225810524093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377434469321286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078617967674146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12164093847055382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828015982083393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047943609291446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892448634760612,0.15134043069991274,0.08492976771616531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10685273204495427,0.0,0.11225879781568024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102602644291765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669586552391099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237425240181628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08596871871414602,0.11044409614496603,0.0,0.07904032219236089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783498264453794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976041580580697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310674956014935,0.0,0.0,0.06511544553325847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13173125426579774,0.08863813579280842,0.08957462247233894,0.0,0.10040438716230532,0.0,0.10076445070804113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932688445124131,0.0,0.0,0.0719115653098734
mentalhealth,cruddyundertaker007,2020/01/03,"If anyone of you've have been out of depression, please help me! Hello everyone, I am in a long distance relationship with my girlfriend and she revealed to me a few days ago and I was very worried after listening to that because she made CUTS and that shook the hell out of me. I tired to talk to her but all she thinks is that she is underserved for everything, she thinks she doesn't deserve the love, affection, or even attention from anybody and no matter how hard I try to tell her otherwise she wouldn't listen, it even makes it worse. I seriously want to know what to say to her now, so I request you to please help me, tell me what you wanted to listen when you were in similar conditions. Also I made a terrible mistake a few days ago, she was telling me about her problems and I started to offer advice, totally unaware of the damage it'll cause on her and as a result she grew furious and said,"" I don't need and guidance or bullshit unless I ask for it, I am in this shit since forever and you know nothing about it"". Please help me become a good listener and a good boyfriend so that I can help her and any other person who might be facing similar conditions.",7.8796215372610225,6.170363150214598,8.117261022239564,74.59296527506828,63.42060085836911,11.73452984783457,36.63246195864222,10.637119530657019,3.6941965665236047,926,36,182,19,11,305,131,233,0.233,0.65,0.11699999999999999,-0.9858,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,4,0,0,10,14,4,1,10,0,16,4,2,7,2,42,34,22,0,7,5,0,1,0,1,3,1,6,0,1,14,14,0,0,6,0,0,2,4,11,0,0,7,7,39,3,30,23,4,17,1,2,0,1,42,6,2,4,9,136,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862909582919047,0.21522468530692992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708224382189723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825550640455252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488457274330789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349110145940665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400332810514618,0.13407497733739648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470958108822595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15658382927990064,0.0,0.10456025024930923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603649753883961,0.0,0.0,0.11600135832201924,0.10910503972298097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20364640957773575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874910698807326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3254831112987301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343475400481147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743374965246018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956678126611467,0.2297401724550501,0.08103436399150134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12878450099264174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001536349999632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648502357707305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600038635170378,0.0,0.3997769111326105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616185827468192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033643233520606,0.0,0.0,0.11547766313079084,0.09654086752829004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461369663065555,0.10042199773811193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592640102670901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757542256725496,0.3183226153896886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555743652259891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395295839801503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242153393434583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016638066431814,0.14320782440950486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328595176614085,0.12371532464643425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spiritlessambitionsx,2020/01/03,. The past few days I’ve been extremely depressed and even suicidal to the point of starting a journal of ways to kill myself. The pain that I’ve been in for years and years are taking a toll on my physical and mental health. I can’t work because of this so that means no insurance or anything to see a doctor. I need help and I need it fast before I do something that I won’t be able to regret. I’m tired.,2.1836710963455133,3.6010740116279085,3.745614617940202,90.09058139534883,76.32558139534882,6.774750830564784,23.913621262458467,7.447530270364453,0.9256830564784058,319,10,70,4,7,106,60,86,0.264,0.7070000000000001,0.028999999999999998,-0.9704,0,0,1,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,1,0,6,0,7,4,0,0,0,9,14,6,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,1,7,0,10,10,1,10,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,1,6,44,12,2,0.20767420367553024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708981746360279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659626699833412,0.0,0.17671545140002262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339326809125047,0.0,0.17886948731774255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125633473713912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716685290562566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207479672235127,0.0,0.0,0.13919964113937314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297607368738532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226218089581654,0.0,0.0,0.20928675181093892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30797558119025154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209799948308149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982485262342495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19631924870817688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16548945265960752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598777480330316,0.0,0.0,0.1469928702548005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271618719338252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15614515579046012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386909470155201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648421164391322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511892936636143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674707566016338
mentalhealth,Funny-Tumbleweed,2020/01/03,"I can’t not stop worrying about my friend. Sometimes I feel like he’s being dramatic for acting depressed. But I feel the same way with my mental health My friend, Simon always thinks so low of himself. Constantly calling himself ugly, a piece of shit, annoying, and etc but as his friend, I constantly tell him that those things aren’t true. Simon always gets into little arguments with his friends like for example, someone is mad at him or etc. he told me that he doesn’t have depression at least not diagnosed and he told me he was a piece of shit for saying he’s depressed because he thinks I will get mad. And Simon, my friend always changes his bio every five seconds to things like this: “I want to kms” “I want to kms everyday” “stop caring about me, I’m toxic” “I want to die”.. and I ask him “are you ok” and he says there is nothing to worry about stop worrying about me.. what should I do? I’m beginning to feel like he’s an attention seeker. But he always tells me this” I don’t seek attention I give attention. I try to help all of my friends even if I myself am depressed”... he’s so creepy tbh...",2.4874434389140285,4.482299226244346,3.776513574660637,87.66811877828056,77.0995475113122,7.1349321266968335,24.17217194570136,8.07648339933343,1.3984876018099546,863,29,175,15,20,282,114,221,0.139,0.614,0.247,0.9735,1,0,0,0,0,1,28.0,0,1,0,0,8,23,5,0,4,1,14,4,2,0,2,33,32,13,1,5,7,0,3,4,6,2,2,2,0,0,8,8,0,3,8,0,0,1,6,10,0,2,3,5,34,13,24,26,7,14,0,5,0,0,36,5,2,2,11,109,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106013931329292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724231344025847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056887469265427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529093008333313,0.0,0.0951467345591296,0.0,0.09872099043419846,0.0,0.0,0.20169317800662576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32150813617417845,0.09471860724887696,0.09685221567284996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20815463177509427,0.061637482004163725,0.0,0.07862676538681848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14155734104517445,0.13333673951217515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4325963271783828,0.0,0.09751249109773236,0.08952177669431402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919560425109783,0.0,0.0,0.06255093846628795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18236723854265785,0.09353191799580436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404537703676924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954378631739501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484248283150214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19158483864551212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907037730723325,0.0,0.09229661807507683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23406100254287215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16313291544349687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399633286923108,0.1195923500590013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783439711499343,0.0,0.06335867046192199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16512900672702013,0.07407367574829414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28431528573919124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Queen033,2020/01/03,"Why do I always feel disheartened when I find out that other people have the same interests as I do? For example, whenever I hear that some of me else has the same hobby as me I immediately get very discouraged to the point where I actually lose interest in the hobby subconsciously. It seems like I have an unhealthy desire to always be special",9.547641025641028,7.981299661538461,10.287692307692314,59.89564102564104,60.07692307692307,14.205128205128204,38.5897435897436,13.023866798666859,5.257358974358974,278,11,47,9,3,96,47,65,0.166,0.66,0.174,-0.10099999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,7,0,0,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,9,10,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,9,4,8,9,3,5,0,3,0,0,1,4,0,2,2,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.27890510798291657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4756264291655223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23875396523717646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445119353015213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612212064716969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149321667465928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221237641538761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396302147745028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197434407940947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19814166672775124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701787406695871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601867497481944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23581961145458005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578951648205836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oscarmonkey4,2020/01/03,"Need help dealing with anxiety So, I don’t really know where to start! 
I’ve recently been diagnosed with anxiety by my university doctors before the holiday period. They have given me some medication to help whilst they try to find me a place in therapy after the holidays. 
But, I’m really struggling. Currently I feel so anxious that I don’t know what to do... it’s at the point where I wake up feeling physically sick and I don’t know how to deal with it and have no idea when I’ll be having the therapy/ help sessions I need. I’ve been dealing with it for a long time and it’s been getting much worse recently (hence why I made myself go to the drs about it) 
If there’s anything anyone can suggest to help me calm down in the situations where I feel hopelessly anxious for no reason, please feel free to share. I would appreciate it so much! 
Thank you!",3.9484615384615367,5.456043294117649,5.544117647058823,78.6054524886878,71.94117647058823,9.70135746606335,28.95927601809955,10.035473477838034,2.9757556561085976,680,27,133,19,13,231,100,170,0.138,0.6779999999999999,0.183,0.8089,1,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,1,2,0,10,6,0,1,8,0,13,6,1,3,0,25,29,10,0,4,2,0,4,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,10,2,1,1,5,2,0,0,5,4,17,5,22,22,3,21,0,1,0,0,12,10,0,2,10,87,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874510710583221,0.27681975445597723,0.0,0.08566706947753719,0.0,0.10082144544803932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042533501665441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37893042110654096,0.0,0.12435266146833578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540183051633008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477940730004705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197875554476304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401032567206688,0.0,0.06962950631552392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284835324990374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383073200847202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20199720584002334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842411286608293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592900028491787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12342346986155155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18012888713592504,0.1816903154432828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800468827301167,0.1344873998289344,0.11581861811096733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697566763432155,0.12596837291565433,0.2419424583398829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377147788532062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671850171137406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808186968113452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127976332459115,0.2802188278048152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144092683694178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831813254847943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055296776125058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485577731505633,0.0870329013626895,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nola_jay,2020/01/03,"Anxiety? Buyers remorse about everything. Hey folx. Hoping some of you will be kind enough to help me with something. 

I seem to get buyers remorse over any little thing I buy, recently. The other day I spent 5 minutes pacing around a shop debating whether to buy a £15 lamp that I know I wanted. 

I recently treated myself to a new Kindle Oasis. I’m a big reader, although mainly paper books over e-books, and I’ve had my old Kindle 4th Generation for 8 years. 

I just feel so guilty about it. Ever since I bought it, all can think about is returning it. I feel so wasteful. 

The new Kindle is an upgrade, but not a necessary one. The old kindle works fine. It doesn’t have a backlight (like the Oasis does) but I have a case with an embedded light so that was never an issue. The old kindle was also a gift from my sister (albeit 8 years ago), and I feel even more guilty about that because I’ve arranged to give it to a friend instead of having it lie in a drawer for years never to be seen again. 

The cost of the new one isn’t an issue, and if the old one was broke I don’t think I’d be questioning my decision in the slightest. But I work hard and earn good money and feel like I should be able to treat myself without feeling this anxiety and guilt every time. 

Hopefully some of you will have some advice or tips. Or maybe you’ll all tell me I’m the worst and that I should return it after all 😂 Any input appreciated. Thanks all.",3.27211706102117,4.522870520547947,4.6596513075965165,85.29537359900375,73.24657534246576,7.226899128268991,23.546699875467,7.686295010490155,1.0511863013698628,1120,30,228,14,22,373,158,292,0.10300000000000001,0.7659999999999999,0.13,0.9011,0,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,3,0,3,14,14,0,1,24,0,23,0,0,0,7,46,43,19,0,6,10,1,6,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,14,10,0,0,11,2,7,0,7,3,0,3,7,8,25,11,28,27,11,29,0,1,1,0,10,7,0,10,24,154,39,5,0.1065932940934029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416173332364792,0.0944885237424618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524261877539786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14497419044663645,0.0,0.16308715644555444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489063083382357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497828271615225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874385644704245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328050998066982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013936698207223,0.0,0.07040386544339332,0.09641973708873858,0.08980944760476882,0.0,0.09579917955587024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694838613187716,0.07615027059867427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235371460046456,0.0,0.055690596687832564,0.10225400058059203,0.0,0.08940539780096225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548665445100056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714472381406013,0.0,0.0,0.2117423847218674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22251141045256093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100051278024994,0.058580886778265936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415219851756093,0.1068344837447169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708729102932966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442263934594312,0.3088454029807986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4474069249158314,0.0,0.21669112420147105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940888440597636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104960368128382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970385315784865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817507437877073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206072547027618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093167237327253,0.0981367839404913,0.0,0.0,0.07081584817343642,0.1366013576129594,0.0,0.0,0.06215540698642739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287148659330903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275213171547024,0.0,0.15520237524000555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059277597931794
mentalhealth,pretty-girl-007,2020/01/03,"I can’t bring myself to do anything when alone. What’s wrong with me? I’m 17, in high school and basically failing, even though I know I’m just as intelligent and bright as my peers. My only problem is, I can never bring myself to study or basically do anything besides lying in bed when I’m alone. I haven’t been for the past 5 years.

So, my problems actually started 5 yrs ago when I transferred to this grammar school. Before that, I was a straight A student despite never studying much. Paying attention at school was enough and then my mum would often study with me (or more like force me to). But, at the new school I struggled to make friends, was of the age when I thought no one understood me and constantly argued with my parents. After school (& the hobbies and clubs I attended) I’d always go straight to bed. I didn’t see it as a problem at first because everything seemed ok, but looking back I think I became depressed. Note that at this point my grades were still amazing.

I finally overcame like a year later, made some amazing friends, became used to my school and my life started being ok again. I’ve since had some ups and downs, but have since become a confident, more or less happy person who can deal with her problems and has a strong support system in the form of family and friends.

In spite of this, I have problems with concentration - I can never pay attention in all my classes for the whole time - and I can never bring myself to study even though I really want to. Everything seems too challenging. Even basic hygiene now. For the sake of my social life, I can pretend just ok - shower every morning, do the most basic stuff for school, attend all social activities and be genuinely happy around my friends, but a soon as I come home, I go straight to bed and can never seem to do anything. My room’s messy and I only manage to clean it when I really have to.

I thought I had depression, but besides being sad about never doing anything, I think I’m happy most of the time. Then I thought about having undiscovered ADHD, but I think I’m way too little impulsive & composed for that and don’t really fit the symptoms. But something’s certainly wrong with me and has been all the time. I know you’re no doctors, guys, but do you have any idea what can be wrong with me?

I’m planning on getting diagnosed, but I want to know what I might have first.",5.391159107271418,6.131683641468682,5.746062634989201,81.35461591072716,67.8768898488121,8.419553635709145,30.768106551475878,8.447377352677275,2.2596217998560117,1878,71,357,26,30,601,210,463,0.122,0.698,0.18,0.9858,2,2,1,0,0,0,59.0,0,1,0,6,24,34,2,1,18,3,40,5,0,3,10,81,76,41,0,8,14,2,0,2,4,2,5,0,7,2,13,24,0,0,16,2,2,8,12,15,0,3,14,3,53,19,51,56,14,66,0,4,3,0,15,21,0,12,37,250,66,17,0.0,0.0,0.06199440968775781,0.0,0.07634861324275412,0.0,0.056313962137560236,0.0,0.0,0.13159221947485608,0.0,0.0,0.05286059463245612,0.13766566854797158,0.0,0.043201389694622325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20911335306533704,0.056553612865726036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04884930426250534,0.0,0.038726232644025284,0.07016196294216892,0.05405786319750861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05472396374231149,0.0,0.06865147136141253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06549483808059367,0.10943358035787233,0.06447983830891438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06502385763085397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564166627249363,0.0,0.1258794334767064,0.0,0.053525292085152686,0.0,0.11419019276928867,0.0,0.05988878191916069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959209460088851,0.0,0.10807419704041332,0.0,0.0,0.19632707898108068,0.0,0.03319088952902538,0.0,0.07220913900419798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290295717084664,0.0,0.20288101600445235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712108596050073,0.0637240163236551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07171566358692569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474039733145338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974376598752233,0.06207338977850741,0.06367199776539799,0.0,0.0,0.05334773150557974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011196789373899,0.042405601375612716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06739343586412205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046700574720898134,0.0,0.29398142504339403,0.06135598144957355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043048387537823515,0.09663219635980393,0.0,0.0,0.07054060555244566,0.0,0.06064490470626375,0.0,0.05547041906520935,0.0,0.0,0.0600547320883732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039397864320375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12209347449397695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4500578769696083,0.05062379164713208,0.17350120342941525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510245272910816,0.0,0.0,0.12951810479954898,0.0,0.04890715193846522,0.0,0.0,0.08993124719191499,0.0,0.05073374394327288,0.0,0.0,0.06641352223447126,0.07272464929989374,0.0,0.07209110728885577,0.0,0.06603017814426733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211901576834447,0.12483236966868334,0.15130300724297727,0.1111315035004205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054868012342525405,0.0,0.0,0.07494121773344335,0.05042576927516624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092702440025563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04512864735790858,0.20837451150503872,0.0,0.08182022259601568
mentalhealth,fazed_fool,2020/01/03,"What do I have? Hey guys, so recently I've become worried about my mental state, and I haven't been able to find any solid answers elsewhere, so I've decided to come here. And I'm not here to get attacked for any choices I've made in my life, I know they were stupid, so can we please just overlook them and talk facts instead of have an intervention.

Here's some facts to start out...

Symptoms:
--headaches where my head feels like it's ""shrinking""
--Occasional panic attacks where I sometimes start to have difficulty reading. I can still read, it just gets sightly hard to look at the words and register them in my head. Then again I do read fast, when I slow down when this happens I usually don't have a problem.
--Random pains, feels like ball of needles, they don't happen in just one place.
--Sometimes extreme paranoia, but this is 99% of the time related to my health, for example, being paranoid that I might have a tumor.
--Very occasional loss of balance, but then again I've always been clumsy.



I am:
-male
-16

I know I have:
-autism(extremely high functioning, super-minimal symptoms, I suggest using Google to get a better explanation)
-ADHD(I don't know much about this except for that I have it. I take prescribed Adderall)

Other things:

•I live in a stressful household, everyone in the family has either ADHD or autism, my mom has depression issues and this leads to some unhealthy verbal interactions with my autistic father, which causes unrest in the rest of the family.

•Life is decently stressful due to multiple reasons(such as the aforementioned family), if you're making an equation in your head, set the stress level to high-very high.

•I've been saving up the past 3 months for a gaming setup, which means triple night shifts at work, so sleep deprivation I guess.

•Personality wise I'm kinda goofy, and I like to look for loopholes to get around difficult things when I can. I usually take bad things in stride and am not usually affected. (I think this may be due to the nature of my family life). This part is kinda vague but I felt like I should include it.

•I might have Hypochondria. My mom says it looks like a classic case, and from the symptoms I've seen online it kinda looks like that to me too. But I feel like I have something else. But you never know, could just be the Hypochondria...

Bad stuff (I know these were stupid of me to do, read the first paragraph again):

Drugs that I used to do(I've quit all of them)=

•alot of weed(plant and occasional THC cart, but I always made sure to check the cart for legitimacy and I haven't had any of the normal cart related problems. Never had any problems smoking.).

•acid, 4 times but appropriately spaced, last time I took 2 tabs and smoked pot, my friend who was also dropping had a bad trip, authorities became involved and I ended up being caught. I was very shaken from being caught but every time I was tripping, the trip was positive.

•shrooms (once, but it was a very positive trip and nothing bad happened)

•one time doing Molly, but that was a small dose, spaced out from other drugs, the trip was positive and I didn't have any bad problems, so I don't think it was a problem

I've never been addicted to any drug I've done. Of course there was the regular occasional teen vaping and drinking, but I never got addicted, and I rarely participated in those activities. Yes, once again I know it was dumb.


So if anyone has any idea about what I have/might have, just give it to me straight. Right now I'm pretty sure it could be a brain tumor or psychosis. Who knows, it could just be some stupid Hypochondria mixing with high stress and my autism/ADHD and causing some extreme paranoia/symptoms. I don't know.

Any theories or answers I'll gladly accept, and I'd be more than happy to answer any questions.

Thanks,
-idiot",4.523732364359437,6.586263113128491,4.815786383865166,82.15061310481966,71.5,7.535801533945649,27.079727298551273,8.281855655710602,1.882227611021684,3023,107,549,48,59,951,330,716,0.15,0.737,0.113,-0.9840000000000001,0,0,6,0,0,0,128.0,1,2,5,6,34,44,7,5,30,1,69,19,5,9,9,117,116,48,0,12,26,3,5,7,1,4,13,1,0,2,37,26,1,0,23,7,1,10,14,27,0,2,29,12,61,17,66,72,11,78,0,3,6,0,25,29,1,18,43,349,98,6,0.04842125571444802,0.0,0.0,0.1055726319490624,0.17457881907812706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038722460700726234,0.08058072740068259,0.0,0.0,0.2963530288929084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03385726784581484,0.0,0.0,0.043105183488219324,0.0,0.11017233738924803,0.0,0.0,0.20214862982180856,0.0,0.05347747267175429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04282466576782134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054054135248051666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948393573498453,0.0,0.04171062428700442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159812978436484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04170515659449304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049551756096785166,0.0,0.04743439643558083,0.16845985169249691,0.0,0.040449745869596376,0.0,0.04288686037287148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04079699633105695,0.046268584882481874,0.0,0.0,0.18258900202472367,0.0,0.07344972535551282,0.10377646427227807,0.046491998952770716,0.0,0.044256150497994834,0.041187095374699535,0.0,0.0,0.03741014205086438,0.0,0.10119243038868153,0.04645008067392673,0.0,0.0,0.038726901560734966,0.0,0.053341472230103534,0.04794465593628235,0.12845626954390096,0.051545327097621316,0.04337593421625188,0.0,0.14908253368690644,0.051469530544460906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20463886069491927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05466170384610944,0.0,0.05053921072870183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128884465233989,0.039469786106185185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260409469331354,0.16559325782985754,0.0,0.04275685591438631,0.0,0.16264663838104038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916347258679882,0.032321564186606734,0.0,0.0,0.05274494265056298,0.0,0.0,0.048797236959275514,0.1541019010963179,0.0,0.11342077894305992,0.03864938434554639,0.0,0.035595194371208776,0.0,0.1493818299308402,0.0,0.0,0.0454400683421903,0.04744254979411972,0.0464615007865012,0.0,0.0,0.10313411407411327,0.06562299204811499,0.0,0.051523630032539576,0.056811910638539125,0.0,0.05243550132182427,0.04622356755872868,0.0,0.04227957279495678,0.05058990628266772,0.053151998144273724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049261824817250686,0.0,0.23166301142651105,0.0,0.0,0.054242888125141366,0.0515019657424931,0.1937374367756772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047810148434202115,0.0,0.0,0.04135148781089226,0.0,0.038506526031025286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04845622496623479,0.0,0.0,0.037277048297499615,0.09577972005978352,0.0,0.06854562803504345,0.0,0.03866927736184407,0.0,0.2218655392902172,0.0,0.0554307531091113,0.0,0.0,0.09127292093768832,0.2013128994199697,0.07281351639527732,0.03891917117870596,0.0,0.04457978666098998,0.0,0.0,0.09650679216377776,0.06205277099441134,0.0,0.0,0.141174118002591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05379779674780569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364083636084696,0.15998751679795375,0.15981042819421082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03525125085449038,0.04917413560170765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YoboiD13,2020/01/03,"Sleeping too much, grades slipping. Need help. I’m a junior in college and I work 35 hours a week while taking 15-18 credits per semester on top of being involved with my fraternity. This last semester was my worst semester in college so far. When I would wake up in the mornings I couldn’t wake up. It’s like my body was saying “no, class isn’t important right now” and I would fall immediately back to sleep without any trouble and I would wake up 2 hours later with immediate regret and promising myself to do better. I’m not sure what is happening because I am an intelligent person but I can’t get the self-control to actually wake up and go to class. Also, I sleep great during the night. Don’t really ever wake up.
 
Anything little bits of information will help or even hearing advice from people who have gone (or are going through) this situation would be greatly appreciated.",4.746094674556211,6.4864159171597615,6.097751479289942,74.49917159763315,70.30177514792899,8.513609467455622,30.159763313609467,9.057496981413335,2.7278899408284034,706,29,124,14,13,238,117,169,0.044000000000000004,0.7809999999999999,0.174,0.9645,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,8,10,0,0,6,0,18,9,9,0,2,22,28,12,0,7,5,0,0,1,0,5,0,2,0,1,5,7,0,0,1,0,1,4,7,3,0,0,3,2,12,7,20,17,3,28,0,1,0,0,8,13,0,2,12,82,17,9,0.0,0.0,0.132291056470113,0.0,0.0,0.13247171985529535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841060295203976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218827169197526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155774584496132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042404646042296,0.0,0.08263864847473756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989547547070055,0.14800094259710014,0.1505812115320994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15204672312661924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953884350952618,0.12262553619814588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082667393870923,0.0,0.1540884627142272,0.0,0.0,0.2989199111568531,0.0,0.0,0.119878931436838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15279065120835286,0.0,0.18173158632043465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670067637569618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050287695377084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662297967981253,0.1358708937527077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965524954113833,0.1005191005873779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721777278648913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398311351030833,0.11836938810993378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684586674973781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157710446448636,0.0,0.107806054395029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14142297542536006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15237978616681105,0.40698616283474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776760842400528,0.0,0.10192737073811793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874138520513016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067900439840216,0.0,0.09869231683091964,0.0,0.0,0.3852035347131524,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Selene___,2020/01/03,what’s it like being raised in a healthy family? i was just wondering what is it like growing up this way,2.0536363636363646,3.9597834545454553,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727276,78.0909090909091,8.036363636363637,24.63636363636364,8.841846274778883,1.8164727272727281,84,3,18,2,2,28,19,22,0.0,0.615,0.385,0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,13,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4934700258375826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5114707007929018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4154969406571793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5676683434319708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CrorigansRevenge,2020/01/03,"After years of feeling rather down, I finally want to do something. I'm just not sure where to start. There's psychologists, psychiatrists, therapists, and other doctors, and im not sure which one you're supposed to see if you think you might have depression. I've booked an appointment with a GP for tomorrow, but im not sure what i should say to them. Has anyone been in a similar situation? How did you end up getting the right help?",4.026785714285712,6.022973821428572,4.963809523809527,80.84785714285717,72.69047619047619,9.085714285714287,28.66666666666667,9.606745405546679,2.7580666666666667,347,14,67,9,7,113,66,84,0.1,0.826,0.073,-0.2881,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,3,1,0,5,4,0,0,4,0,7,1,0,1,3,19,14,5,0,4,7,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,3,6,3,11,10,0,11,0,1,1,0,6,5,0,2,6,44,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13618399865189684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16775054074966209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993499114903102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172503704723037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984788784921975,0.0,0.0,0.21335519614772228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175651108642128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305466651883925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4207585705764322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20661455601129616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197759342708787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632797973946944,0.0,0.15488469751839692,0.0,0.0,0.15520224040615946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21892367011117325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993937249195086,0.0,0.0,0.13785544891614274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5506902416877675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261368147494219,0.0,0.1247973480898278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487725941262178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542207373508446
mentalhealth,crumblingpuppet,2020/01/03,"The decent is happening but where does it go this time. Around November I started drinking again, because of depression and just isolation. I don't feel like being around anyone and the town I live in is small, where I feel stuck, with no support or really any good help. December is generally a rough month to begin with as I don't really like my family (well more or less don't feel like a belong) The drinking came on slow but as it rolls along its picking up momentum and I'm again doing this alone. Even when I am drinking I don't feel like being around anyone (essentially I hang around the cats)

I don't know overly what has happened to pull me back down this road after 8 months of sobriety but it could be the fact the people who said they'd be there for me just aren't. I also decided to just go home new years after playing dnd with some friends because they decide to not only distribute there share of the drugs around me but also use infront of me. So I just made an excuse and went home. To again drink and just go to sleep.

Then as I'm writing this (I've just woken up) and ive already begun drinking.

I know it's a few things bugging me. Like I mentioned feeling stuck in this town, I can't find a job here that accommodates my shoulder injury or isn't around people (I can't do customer interaction because of my anxiety) the times I do get out of this town, it's limited to pretty much my running around or doing shit for people who can't even return a small favour.

I feel a sense of abandonment yet again. I feel aban9by my family, friends, even my therapist I csnt overly afford due to being on disability. Like things have been going fairly well being sober but I know I'm slipping back down the path and I just don't know how far or quick this landslide is going to happen again. Last time I ended up using heroin and mdma to cope along with alcohol.

Just feel stuck, like very very stuck.",4.288064236111111,5.347314247395836,5.198333333333334,83.12444444444445,70.58854166666666,8.084722222222222,25.940972222222207,8.401726058763845,1.6271743055555559,1517,45,300,23,27,496,186,384,0.141,0.748,0.11199999999999999,-0.8976,2,2,7,1,0,0,32.0,0,0,2,1,39,19,1,0,16,0,32,10,3,5,1,69,70,27,0,1,19,0,9,7,2,0,2,1,2,0,19,23,6,2,15,6,0,10,13,3,2,0,10,10,36,16,49,52,5,66,0,2,0,0,13,28,1,6,35,208,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795863183802487,0.0,0.07555155115516538,0.08049931730880312,0.11667208763139796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04960676271762627,0.0,0.055804594232688236,0.0,0.0,0.10201309652288024,0.0,0.0,0.4545708302116612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218416178741017,0.0,0.13340425254599322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343244137685904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0582425974518179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628295257690404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383679895758462,0.0,0.0,0.3573036138151961,0.08459587460510865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460978255399646,0.0,0.0,0.14454329436271593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753671421738015,0.0,0.2950753520688933,0.1563410035745067,0.0,0.0,0.06667264135196799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127180270229995,0.0,0.03811202817529415,0.0,0.20728856467036486,0.06118485422437784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935215488093633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04889513337996747,0.0,0.14634446620939134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238908120708852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603600277398199,0.059461902214378214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494690515410798,0.0,0.0644139286322883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902463436646046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645190609435102,0.0,0.053624764048846016,0.0,0.0,0.07045309501825929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05547981754277418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517177161194823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742137746149621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934639998297277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06938972309386303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487950196143375,0.0,0.0,0.07300012477566087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05163257561717798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277989385546017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469760375217232,0.09692607949496193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760872193156908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600633860638322,0.0,0.12037856030632182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117702379394355,0.0676230104945447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04697576161918183
mentalhealth,AmongstTheOldBones,2020/01/03,"What happens when you check yourself into a mental health establishment / Hospital? Sorry if this isn't the right place for this.  Didn't know where else to post..

I've been feeling really low lately, the worst I've ever felt in my life. I'm supposed to start therapy on the 14th, hopefully, but I'm not sure if it will help at this point. I'm not sure what else to do besides check myself into a mental health hospital, and hope that they can help. But I don't know what all will happen..

The main thing is that I'm worried about my family and home life. I live with my mother and cousins and a couple other people. I've heard in some cases law enforcement can get involved and confiscate computers and cellphones and other things, and I just don't want to disrupt their lives even more than I would by just going to the hospital or by just getting therapy. They've got their own problems, they're just trying to live their own lives. I don't want to throw another wrench into it.

Is it true that they can do this? Confiscate computers and other things, notebooks, journals, etc.? Or is this just some lie that I heard? I know that they're allowed to do that type of stuff with some criminal cases, but this isn't a criminal case. I wouldn't think that they would be able to, or allowed to, if it was simply me checking myself into a mental health facility.. 

Thanks for any help or clarifications..",5.234871794871792,6.069321150183152,5.669322344322348,81.42984432234434,68.26739926739927,8.850549450549451,27.62087912087912,8.998388855275968,2.059584615384615,1106,34,214,19,18,355,132,273,0.106,0.804,0.09,-0.3201,2,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,6,0,10,9,0,0,10,0,23,5,0,2,5,58,47,20,0,11,17,2,2,0,0,5,5,2,1,0,27,15,0,0,7,0,3,2,9,3,0,0,7,4,21,6,27,34,10,20,0,1,0,0,16,13,0,12,4,148,48,3,0.10511101241057627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147909284939136,0.11021806131049236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630333598889454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17561352663702884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722656367910647,0.06942483237161784,0.09507892844439404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908930786014757,0.0,0.05314728610733591,0.0,0.10092305552206167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983233137495194,0.0,0.05973701063716205,0.0,0.08406687869845927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18589864228044656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33518427293973185,0.0,0.0,0.2113610879212785,0.0,0.10543491567591096,0.208797904386395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17329879059119813,0.0,0.11856980031257182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14848603313505598,0.0,0.0,0.37125979872622666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177815344076961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287074129477346,0.0,0.10981863623046677,0.0,0.09936388160968113,0.0,0.1006672945218538,0.0,0.0,0.10057704332462314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673368060715118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976423028181764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766317282830567,0.07439811558761772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203269616207186,0.0,0.0,0.19813177051846453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677209811776928,0.24040720641411845,0.0,0.2094932582635396,0.0673508925560355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136347775871785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399439690436748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067453353129005,0.0,0.14933569486839576,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sarajasim,2020/01/03,"Should I get checked out for depression? (Slight trigger warning for obvious reasons)
I really just wanna figure out if I’m just a lazy bitch or I actually have something wrong with me. I don’t feel sad or hopeless or anything like that but I experience things that a lot of people tell me are symptoms of depression. My room is an absolute disaster and you can hardly walk in it. I don’t know why I can’t just pick up after myself but it just gets like that. You can hardly walk in it. I lay in bed all the time, especially these last few months. I come home from school and lie down in my bed and I come downstairs for dinner and then somehow I’m back in my bed for the rest of the night. It’s like I physically cannot get up and there’s a magnet making me stay there. Today I woke up at 11 and didn’t get out of bed until almost 3 but only because my sister wanted to go to Panera for lunch. That’s the only thing I ate all day. I also have a huge problem getting up in the morning. I’ll lay there until literally five minutes before I have to leave before racing to put some clothes on and brushing my teeth for like 30 seconds. I’m usually not late to school but this year I have been late to class multiple times because of this. I rarely eat breakfast and I don’t have much for lunch either. I try to keep up with my hygiene but often I’ll go 3 or 4 days without showering on accident.  I am also a severe procrastinator and I won’t do anything unless it’s right before I have to get it done. Usually I’m able to get by like this but my grades have suffered this year from flat out just not doing big assignments which is unusual of me, but that’s probably just senioritis. I just don’t have the motivation to do anything anymore. The only reason I ask this question is because people have brought this up to me and I just don’t wanna look like an idiot in a psychiatrist’s office trying to figure out if I have depression when I’m just lazy. I’m not trying to get a diagnosis here or anything I’m just trying to see if I should take this seriously or I just need to get my shit together. I do have OCD and undiagnosed dermatillomania (but it’s extremely obvious, it’s just not very long term and I just go through a phase of intense picking for a few months. This year I started picking every single day at my scalp January - August, presumably from stress, and I lost a lot of hair because of it. I had two huge bald patches on the top of my head.) and I tried to kms when I was 11 just for a little context. (I don’t think I understood death back then, that when you’re gone you’re gone, and I thought I would be dead as soon as I passed out from choking myself. I don’t think I had depression back then either, just a really low self esteem and very insecure and confused.) obviously this isn’t very severe since I don’t feel sad or any significant negative emotions but to be honest I’m not sure what I feel. I kinda feel nothing. I’ve had a lot of shit happen this year and I’ve always felt I don’t feel emotions as strongly as other people. Sorry for such a long post.",2.1279802562833403,3.9785102993730455,4.1078650387724815,85.54716355936866,77.66771159874608,6.985029973051753,24.202386844855084,7.9147122085399175,1.318880459770115,2433,83,503,40,57,829,266,638,0.174,0.759,0.067,-0.9973,1,0,1,0,0,2,46.0,0,2,0,4,31,29,4,3,24,0,47,14,7,8,6,118,96,52,2,11,43,1,9,6,0,4,1,0,7,1,31,28,6,1,18,0,1,12,21,20,0,3,16,12,65,9,82,74,14,84,0,10,2,0,7,33,3,20,43,342,96,8,0.06690458540700038,0.0,0.06528922425476011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699527793777195,0.0,0.0,0.10700714555603452,0.05566997467321506,0.0,0.0,0.04549741233275211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635137092535467,0.0,0.0,0.22022709259934573,0.0,0.06254675590039363,0.0,0.0,0.15433648921316492,0.0,0.16313765711278766,0.0,0.1707926232773973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152647523825582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944376812778438,0.0,0.23049928549920026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846661964726798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846009361941896,0.0,0.1505173069437395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636999877650521,0.0,0.0,0.06544552251145089,0.0,0.0,0.16914484319821638,0.0,0.06423889403078194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31459396041206084,0.0,0.11407025311072215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05916350391962397,0.0,0.1198667342496752,0.0,0.0686634066009396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06711075422967848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059467869589751775,0.0,0.0,0.036769010433620526,0.05453616674276715,0.15094257299542926,0.07084229568649793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19611720569229352,0.06705597104305626,0.0,0.1184169054413468,0.05618300139146788,0.0,0.07303425830996592,0.1706396579472494,0.0,0.0,0.04465933028179266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068052035297808,0.0,0.0491825684144066,0.049608902334367294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278542116355895,0.0,0.06419675412466366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265185611432106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13914964634486876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640760986843215,0.0,0.07213445893407386,0.06401865257287491,0.0,0.06725758750452095,0.07494844748951916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572158120308951,0.13757811348272142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057136150377134313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542202459445546,0.05331429240350588,0.0,0.06979607392739927,0.15116627575361294,0.13735319095111842,0.055344164421579564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05150641850861325,0.0,0.07489420580405258,0.047355409907086116,0.07131138610551617,0.0,0.0,0.07663897653672068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305677996285286,0.06953948154609407,0.05030392184767598,0.0,0.05847755658469001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889686734209068,0.08573951368010191,0.0,0.05311476749844784,0.07802520356649094,0.0,0.06341772401800001,0.0,0.0,0.2271191087951263,0.0,0.06535605832615525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473718972343621,0.1656098693273649,0.03946205791108446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603709819872526,0.0,0.0,0.06449363283665048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04752709788680054,0.07314966128478248,0.0,0.17233743779644542
mentalhealth,Nikki2301,2020/01/03,"I feel so alone and a burden on those around me I know I'm not meant to base my self worth on others, but I've always needed friends and people around me. My self worth and happiness shot up when I was travelling and with people all the time. But being back home I hate the idea of always asking the group chat to hang out. I've had a few recent experiences with romance which have ended poorly after I begin to trust them, and then it ends. 
I just want someone around a lot, someone who isn't my family, who wants my company. Who asks me to lunch for no reason. I feel like I keep fucking up and driving my friends and potential SOs away. 
And how do I tell people about this without burdening them or looking for attention. 
I just want someone around.",3.9305237808549087,5.134901715231788,4.767609873570142,85.33095725466588,71.58278145695364,7.610114388922335,24.98555087296809,8.00094639256281,1.3285443708609272,593,17,119,8,11,192,96,151,0.07,0.718,0.212,0.9735,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,0,11,10,2,0,6,0,6,2,0,2,1,37,22,15,0,4,7,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,8,15,1,1,7,2,3,3,4,4,0,0,3,3,20,6,22,18,3,22,0,0,1,1,14,10,1,2,10,85,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230024087558198,0.0,0.0,0.21258002731800454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4548631604134983,0.2388395388359238,0.0,0.12001604855856912,0.09822426806577148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262796637294004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495434967405422,0.12042201743035573,0.0,0.12917848660375492,0.0912575679139374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19738340111027136,0.11809368342013295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598173404469666,0.0,0.1261169232965002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813375658262194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442030479456331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135412887839462,0.0,0.0,0.07020262976871618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624073706821974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072695294071343,0.0,0.0,0.10860008278218933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471768107818122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26567674760875315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133811940006138,0.12612795873240584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665216104241335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247013697872796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165049606394616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448629177137903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22603329886548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313691815679002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brysucks,2020/01/03,"help me out :( for about 2 or more years i’ve been struggling to do basic human things like showering or exercising because i find it so hard to get out of bed in the morning. i am always angry about little things and i get my phone taken away because my mom thinks that’s the problem. i cry myself to sleep and wish i had a friend or someone i could rely on. i’m always tired and anxious, sometimes i can be suicidal but i’m always too nervous to go through with it. some days i can be happy but most are terrible. i can barely leave the house or go to school because i dread being around other people. i don’t know if i have a mental illness or something but i really want to know, i am too scared to go to my mom about it cause she’s just going to say i’m overreacting. my mom suffers from bipolar disorder and i heard it could be genetic... please help me out here.",1.9212776243093928,3.673793790055253,3.8163501381215466,87.85005006906077,77.95027624309392,6.292955801104973,23.467196132596683,7.1686216300943375,0.8827483425414364,680,22,142,8,16,230,109,181,0.221,0.667,0.11199999999999999,-0.9671,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,9,10,0,4,5,0,17,5,1,1,0,31,33,14,1,6,10,3,1,1,1,0,4,2,2,1,8,9,0,0,4,1,0,4,1,7,0,0,4,3,23,3,24,23,3,14,0,1,0,0,11,8,0,8,3,98,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082251433150771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949245017045547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991959481175356,0.0,0.0,0.11600953057155232,0.0,0.0,0.22580901122570474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268436069789221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19717067620880366,0.0,0.13563231208330873,0.07963164308275239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141513905563039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285459745223173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539705722874367,0.0,0.12902196494976506,0.0,0.2806964541732159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13144223062078633,0.11061001781687682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16552638332834044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14247443594487474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571808474235514,0.0,0.0,0.1307429894894834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060324013863141415,0.1237551385416263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443451298525646,0.0,0.0,0.4338399139883688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560253717187175,0.0,0.0,0.13553929311193838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181496158383464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910172645910954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09819287140014886,0.12362076506824785,0.12496404984213402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356492150999387,0.0,0.10462060126505976,0.0950576639062253,0.12212067283081995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908366210602748,0.0,0.13506242826320786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16406360183454866,0.07911827409940572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14191720923021875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282919578911452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199101740702552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951433391634002
mentalhealth,rhodologist,2020/01/03,"Having trouble finding myself(F17). Have no sense of self. I feel alone. Not entirely sure if this belongs here. I apologize in advance if it doesn’t. 

For the past year and a half I’ve been struggling with my mental health, but these past few months have been getting a bit worse. I haven’t gone to therapy/counseling at all because my mom can’t afford it right now nor believes that I need to see a therapist for my “issues”.  She believes nothing is wrong with me and that I’m “just a teenager going through teenage issues”. It’s beyond difficult to talk to her about my mental health. 

To get straight to the point, I really need to talk to someone about my mental health because it hasn’t gotten any better. I feel like I’m watching myself through a TV screen. Nothing feels real anymore. I look in the mirror and I feel like I don’t even know who that girl is anymore. Never in a million years would I thought I’d feel this way. I hate it. It’s fucking terrifying. I tend to forget things very easily, I can’t concentrate on one thing, my head feels like it’s constantly spinning, and I’ve never felt more alone. I just turned 17 a few weeks ago and I’m concerned that I shouldn’t be feeling this way at such a young age/something is really wrong with me. 

I feel like I have no sense of self. I struggle with finding who I really am. I’m afraid of the future because I have so many unrealistic goals and I am constantly changing what I want to pursue a career in. I feel like I don’t have one true identity if that makes sense? 

On another note, I struggle with concentrating on simple tasks. I tend to go off on tangents when I talk to my friends/family and I have trouble controlling it. I tend to forget things very easily and I feel fucking stupid afterwards. 

I don’t really know where to go with this to be honest because I feel disconnected from reality but any advice is greatly appreciated. I really hope I get some fucking help soon before I completely lose my shit. 

Also I’m really scared to talk to my boyfriend(M15) about this type of shit because I’m afraid it’ll scare him/make him not want to be with me anymore because he might not know how to react or want to deal with me :( I love him a lot. I have no idea how to bring it up to him and I’m nervous because I love him a lot but I’m afraid he won’t know what to do when I get like this :(

I apologize that there is absolutely no order to this whatsoever but I just really needed to let this out. Any advice is appreciated. 

TL;DR: I(F17) like I have no self of self. Often disconnected from reality. Difficulty focusing on simple tasks/concentrating. I feel like something is wrong with me and it’s terrifying. Any advice?

Edit: Spelling.",2.570699394999636,4.771779659851305,4.1404745243822445,84.16640680807639,77.68029739776952,7.193585538304541,25.23303447773161,8.188393138257906,1.6731083460893648,2139,79,421,40,51,712,223,538,0.171,0.667,0.162,-0.7478,1,2,2,0,0,0,60.0,0,0,0,5,21,39,7,9,15,0,38,11,3,5,5,82,94,25,0,12,14,1,13,8,0,5,3,0,0,5,33,20,0,1,21,1,0,6,21,23,0,4,6,17,64,16,63,79,8,46,0,1,4,5,26,19,5,10,26,269,97,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16232953006003328,0.04908481315789144,0.0,0.0,0.11469943262343135,0.0,0.04428175877828314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506221235964104,0.058063406345422994,0.0,0.0,0.16474537583397406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23628401821530215,0.0,0.047118334673077286,0.12477279177651847,0.0,0.04897290835795718,0.06045296180063363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058577279478721864,0.0,0.058057524770437616,0.11967705758503963,0.0621055148959918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057087119569732565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0365733365704953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05220072534720546,0.0,0.3359789601865841,0.23735084365038564,0.05316675246075398,0.0,0.1012198163724057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357430638511058,0.11572040390955228,0.0,0.0944092360520282,0.0,0.0,0.06104891514038269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05466936209105277,0.0568286611552646,0.17657669177712268,0.0,0.0,0.03711534687892267,0.0,0.0,0.05499787159341877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250936382454574,0.0,0.1155900269680548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217261850750071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05662263222325315,0.0,0.21641956088348555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04649936417104299,0.061948210102471285,0.0,0.09415226907779424,0.09995256778448422,0.0,0.03696189970234179,0.0561395190533452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740884517472066,0.05874199011922138,0.0,0.06485217471609908,0.04419819101234286,0.0,0.0,0.12317510770019655,0.08541412450490164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626375148035323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504433994116809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571956592980204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05234537212289173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06302658343293037,0.2483134797066745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04728822949856347,0.0,0.0,0.11087604246978693,0.0,0.04412510255047662,0.0,0.23106441299891425,0.0,0.11367915362137962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04691735333734341,0.08525766342350911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736636105664216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521883862080622,0.0,0.0,0.1780268421788437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.064292307347777,0.1103620589634213,0.0,0.0,0.04395996752757456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06022991057159599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913770290354696,0.097981269581566,0.08790500150454203,0.04441687120770083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056429805776025264,0.039335382195632575,0.1816250104921999,0.0,0.07131677804612936
mentalhealth,conofgames,2020/01/03,"#RazerStreamer (PC) LET'S HAVE A CHAT (mental health) i'm discuss mental health stream, sharing what i went through.",5.2360000000000015,8.287782600000002,4.240000000000002,82.47500000000002,73.0,6.0,30.0,7.1686216300943375,1.906,92,4,15,1,2,27,17,20,0.0,0.843,0.157,0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6564808096954367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157693499201472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6223963826958353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862610818112912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1953380,2020/01/03,"My psychiatrist sucks I don’t know what’s wrong with me. 

My anxiety is shit. I go through so many ups and downs. Most weeks I feel like balling and crying 24/7. Other times, I don’t feel like I’m living, i’m just existing. I make so many mistakes that I get so frustrated with it. I feel like i’m in a sad cycle. And I spiral. The final one before it restarts is me getting upset with myself for being upset. 

My mom sent me to a psychiatrist who is no help at all. I’m in her room for 5-10 minutes. Every time I’m there she just asks me about college. Barely ever asks me about how I am. I can never tell if the medication works. I want a therapist and my mom told me she’d get me one for years. Same with the psychiatrist, and surprisingly she finally did it. It didn’t change anything. Not to mention that the other day I sat on the couch pretty much crying to my dad because I wasn’t feeling good mentally and all he cared about was that I was drinking an energy drink!!!

I was 17 when I first went to my psychiatrist and they said they only accept 18 or older. But because my insurance sent me there, they took me in. Also, I don’t have insurance based in the state I live in, so my mom said it was hard to make the appointment. And I feel like a burden to ask for someone else. Even though she agreed that my psychiatrist isn’t helpful. Then she changes her mind and says she is and blames it it on

I can’t tell what’s wrong with me. I have ideas but I don’t want to seem like i’m reaching for a mental illness. And I know google is a terrible place because it just gets these ideas and bad thoughts into my head. Im not only hurting myself but those around me",1.3673160173160142,3.2489847428571434,3.24579220779221,90.68241991341992,80.14285714285714,6.299567099567097,21.463203463203467,7.348242739294969,0.6015619047619052,1300,38,289,18,33,436,170,350,0.127,0.767,0.106,-0.887,0,0,2,0,0,1,36.0,0,0,3,2,19,22,3,2,14,0,24,6,2,3,4,54,61,26,0,4,10,4,6,5,0,0,2,3,2,0,19,19,2,0,12,3,0,5,12,13,0,3,16,9,57,9,33,43,5,33,0,2,0,0,31,14,2,4,18,191,76,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685372988287705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06556317331061041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052692592275897,0.07629455329902791,0.2403644547832925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715590941237056,0.1567327251511862,0.0,0.07292762240930853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738073714798424,0.0,0.1813265154309312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18828320248145394,0.055271861653701966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16791419473023295,0.0,0.0,0.07159452860288802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566065523785508,0.07752399479014617,0.07220914885725388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166720849039212,0.24490725071057454,0.0,0.18776865001798207,0.0,0.07289960949025925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910679526181425,0.0,0.04870744524768896,0.07188428222899877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677377190289432,0.0,0.08795682554387288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489090272637192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174769171671568,0.19349831922847266,0.09257481210573736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420113554594728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093527409182468,0.0,0.15135605319256054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114415905558874,0.17378040527828162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633756317788244,0.1727385476529628,0.0,0.08653640777058,0.3011257683192623,0.0,0.0,0.06300215506299038,0.0,0.06610005493121045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615022740420355,0.1303632054963416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954223109456633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719157685883147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16304788176430585,0.06815510258615133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802152177215027,0.0,0.0,0.08797372030050472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261655260887065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498177995346112,0.0,0.0,0.09950871877398793,0.0,0.0,0.08420354950393713,0.06803924491856504,0.09994915134357896,0.0,0.0,0.08189365477012464,0.09522007654758012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110064487362523,0.0,0.06874641972202243,0.0,0.0,0.07944828231081441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06239338797642181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18740730513452156,0.0,0.055190438041609516
mentalhealth,ifhy8866,2020/01/03,"Sudden decrease of Effexor/Venlafaxine dose - advice appreciated TLDR: going from 225mg to 150mg of Effexor suddenly. How bad will it be? 


I’m currently on 225mg of Effexor/Venlafaxine (an SNRI). I take this daily, in the form of a 150mg capsule and a 75mg capsule. I’ve been on this dosage for about a year now. I have BPD, if it’s relevant. 

I have lost (or run out of?) my 75mg capsules. I can’t find any in my house. I’ve searched and searched. I still have a few of my 150mg though, so I took one this morning. 

My question is, will the side effects of decreasing my dosage suddenly by 75mg effect me much in terms of mood and side effects? I’ve accidentally gone cold turkey once over a weekend - it was hell, physically and mentally. 

It’s Friday night where I am. I currently have no GP. I’m going to try a pharmacy tomorrow to see if I can get even a small prescription so I don’t have to keep taking a smaller dose. On Monday I’m going to contact my psychologist and my last doctors office to sort out a new prescription. I’m not worried about the long term - just how much I’ll suffer if I can’t get any over the next few days lol.",2.0934453781512588,3.651137546218493,4.4703277310924365,84.2077605042017,76.89915966386555,8.121344537815126,26.605882352941176,8.841846274778883,2.0238396638655463,888,35,191,20,20,311,127,238,0.08900000000000001,0.873,0.037000000000000005,-0.9012,2,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,4,12,5,1,0,14,1,16,3,0,5,0,22,32,14,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,5,1,0,6,5,4,0,1,5,2,19,0,29,24,7,39,1,2,1,0,2,14,1,6,19,112,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696105178561382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236066996322208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492363391006866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21860523923875733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193823988299344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17765616880270568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146412957609336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863976319537645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18136623964563287,0.0,0.2959313578607353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200276384745926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15427692072970586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14148265158175188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15360391804736914,0.0,0.0,0.18947207218906706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17491765616078328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551877261081622,0.0,0.0,0.1676349111635744,0.18459357995823256,0.1628836127921564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848463010223129,0.11761547040966333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944380347223287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831275476385144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386131630200692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610059589094361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705315659969258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928425685575967,0.11784258284519256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17626867993287576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177333833001787
mentalhealth,xboxlordz,2020/01/03,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me anymore Let start with I’m 14 (M) diagnosed with ptsd child hood bipolar disorder tourettes neurological movement disorder and extreme anxiety and depression and in therapy I self harm small but is noticeable and don’t know what is right and wrong I don’t know what my emotions are I’m just there spiratic and have some violent thoughts and are starting to break mentally I’m yelling at people more and want to murder my grandparents and might because they stole 260,000 dollars from my family after my dad died when I was 5 and stalked us and attempted to use dcfs as a way to as well as molesting my sisters I know where they live and I know there still out there that’s all I hear in my head now is just arguing and yelling and anger that’s it I just wear a mask and pretend and no one will listen no one",5.203297471759008,5.931968781065091,5.553297471759013,82.6125067240452,68.28994082840237,9.932436793975256,33.70683162990855,10.018931242160765,3.2153384615384617,680,31,139,16,11,217,102,169,0.285,0.691,0.024,-0.9941,1,0,0,0,2,0,3.0,1,0,2,1,11,10,5,0,2,0,13,5,2,1,1,35,28,21,2,1,4,2,0,0,0,2,3,4,0,2,6,20,0,0,6,1,1,1,5,9,1,2,2,4,18,1,16,23,3,16,0,1,0,0,10,7,0,2,6,90,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257703091347468,0.0,0.14594322062710025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970739697068486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674873031577433,0.149364347029397,0.15272889216281296,0.0,0.33731631968911724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16553524237050055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387293926341113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15102866088242253,0.0,0.1658600649252775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.404376558247078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048111545249046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12994501500465708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830271200379194,0.1561135512419621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754268553597962,0.0,0.0,0.19943890877798634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020222453757517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720222164514687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567387356101895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535200203708132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20832127323282415,0.0,0.11752220128312482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682903355111013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682863704962207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17701541366952328,0.12709902895660946,0.0,0.0,0.08679880677365252,0.11680879324101776,0.0,0.0,0.13231455282348534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32179281322439673,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,murphinator9000,2020/01/03,"I'm concerned that I have a mental illness called Borderline Personality Disorder I've known something was off for a while and I have been to counseling for depression and other related issues but at the time I didn't bring it up. I have cut myself in the past and continue to do so occasionally, I have also attempted suicide. When I cut myself I feel like I deserve it and that I'm worthless. I'm not looking for validation, I just don't know how I should go about getting help. I've taken psychology tests in the past and never given them much credit but I fit the description of BPD shockingly well.  It honestly surprised me the more I read and I wouldn't say that I'm convinced but I am worried. When I did get around to taking an online test ([https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/borderline-test/](https://psychcentral.com/quizzes/borderline-test/)) I scored higher than 40. I'm just looking for some answers and what I should do next. Any help is appreciated.",5.854321705426358,8.52264679651163,6.033162790697678,72.23121705426358,69.40697674418604,8.307596899224807,28.327131782945727,9.029198982220553,2.557517364341085,787,29,130,16,15,250,105,172,0.14300000000000002,0.6729999999999999,0.184,0.8658,0,0,1,0,0,3,33.0,0,0,1,1,10,11,2,0,8,0,16,1,0,1,1,24,32,16,1,3,6,0,1,1,0,3,1,1,0,1,8,8,0,0,4,1,1,2,5,5,1,0,6,4,21,6,16,23,3,18,0,2,2,0,6,7,0,1,10,93,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14884961982765682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265760803856969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16569686065179487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344266226597163,0.0,0.19006148917913135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603151398853833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21332329263519828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411388547946667,0.13297267248735992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944924795612147,0.0,0.10578305290390992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24952058929550244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19427335368736048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022932290370756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093464851427087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31260784892229465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18757718488412128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682836921948524,0.0,0.14355640235660586,0.0,0.19795339610782128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3553679354920611,0.0,0.16252320289363814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618227824751465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14801956427563467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14329343659908356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20359809725962333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994803064708927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085350125685392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16735493911396665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18902598794633296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anko_Dango,2020/01/03,Sorry. Totally burned myself on purpose.  Hit my head against the wall too.,2.1128205128205124,4.0568397692307725,2.4384615384615387,85.29820512820513,112.84615384615385,4.810256410256411,27.41025641025641,6.42735559955562,2.067225641025641,59,3,9,1,3,18,13,13,0.098,0.902,0.0,-0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6757801641941237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7371032286469537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slowdiiiv,2020/01/03,"I think I’ve been experiencing anxiety/panic attacks, but I’m unsure. For the past 3 weeks, I’ve been experiencing extremely tight/heavy feeling on my chest along with having a difficulty to take full breaths. I’ve had a history of dealing with stress/extreme anxiety/depression but my body has never reacted this way before which is why I’m concerned. I notice whenever I’m slightly upset or overstimulated it flairs up, especially at work or in the car, but whenever I’m completely calm and distracted, I don’t notice it as much. Of course, the more I notice it, the more anxious I get. I definitely would like to go to a doctor soon, only issue is that my work schedule is extremely busy which could also be the reason why my body is reacting this way. I definitely have a lot of stress and anxiety, mostly stress, and I believe that’s why my body is reacting this way. Do you guys have any ideas of what this could possibly be?",7.0967597765363095,6.98543255865922,8.332899441340782,67.20169553072628,64.19553072625698,12.076201117318435,35.77709497206703,11.602472056035307,4.385086703910613,744,32,133,22,10,257,103,179,0.145,0.763,0.092,-0.8270000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,2,2,7,1,4,9,0,19,6,5,4,1,24,28,10,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,12,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,3,3,14,2,16,20,6,15,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,4,6,87,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253595016934801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868906807262094,0.0,0.08852042088166154,0.13072318570629696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164067750607658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846356580373364,0.13036935705436312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3855944466872526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213232799991599,0.0,0.0,0.18477544046565672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192954163872801,0.09966376678020578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11843755017203995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058508162983923875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060455466456104064,0.0,0.06576258188372562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145744410949367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062632414732814,0.0,0.1207747080366104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0565317137747923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837537984135604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850626502809171,0.0,0.08924529407829572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952213587162641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800524162663698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046151682668727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304494524997193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897262923403035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976478660549719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700206292264402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414446319653853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755436910124511,0.0928182957080258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31323998888961885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684814411816101,0.0,0.0,0.082199466940153,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,grrrrrrrrrdinosaur,2020/01/03,"What should I say at my appointment? Soon I have an appointment I need to go to. I’m scared because I don’t know how I’m supposed to tell them about my problems. Also what if they think I’m attention seeking or don’t trust what I said because I kind of self diagnosed myself. I know that my self diagnosis might not be correct because yknow that’s why it’s a self diagnosis and why I want an actual diagnosis to make sure it’s correct. I have bad anxiety and lack every social skill so that’s going to be fun. I believe I might have these illnesses because obviously I have a lot of symptoms of them and it explains quite a few things about why I am the way I am. I could possibly have: depression, social anxiety, gad, selective mutism, adhd, bpd and autism. Do any of you have any advice on what I should say during the appointment? ;/",4.737970779220781,5.396347375000005,6.1699350649350615,78.02961038961041,69.29761904761905,9.918614718614721,31.34415584415585,10.018931242160765,3.0561000000000007,661,27,131,16,11,225,91,168,0.13699999999999998,0.8,0.063,-0.897,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,3,2,6,8,0,1,7,0,18,3,0,2,4,28,31,9,0,8,3,0,0,0,0,4,3,3,0,3,12,4,0,0,5,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,1,3,24,4,13,23,3,6,0,1,0,0,14,2,0,5,1,88,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.121791856595107,0.0,0.1499915783073102,0.12195818173973295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980666086151356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16974361026735582,0.0,0.1909512488948529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042071158451276,0.3043203280041081,0.0,0.0,0.14061270438619705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15718776071983626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964678424084167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074945224316495,0.126674635021902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051537506475111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185932484477054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12996539399737372,0.1371793308004884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610490468817957,0.0,0.0,0.08330842970487667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647971556646838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254146282045038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406990930701257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119421706147766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13274567616685307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871831044942692,0.19850018387191526,0.12495176200946105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3905970789374574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544463367852939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762740927382165,0.12972037362723748,0.0,0.0,0.10908523216333917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291501884625922,0.07997012274119533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361333134087894,0.0990645461613576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3378518001074819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayjpegpng,2020/01/03,"Wondering if I should see a doctor So before I start, I do have diagnosed mental health issues. However, none of them really relate to this?

I’m very confused, because I don’t have any disorders that do either of these two things and I’m not going to try and self diagnose them.

However, I’ve been having a lot of times where I don’t feel like I’m in my body. I know my body is mine, I know I am me, it’s not like anyone is “taking over” my body. It’s hard to control myself when things get like that, and I often feel empty and sluggish. I’ll have one of these about once a day or so, and they’ve been getting longer lately. The problem with this is that it gets hard to remember what happens during these times, and I think it’s actively worsening my education and social life.

I feel like I’m overthinking it, and that it’s not really worth mentioning. As far as I’m aware, nothing I have should be causing this. I also don’t want to cause unneeded concern. 

I’ve never heard of anything like this- being out of your body but completely aware and still and control, except it’s like you’re controlling a puppet.

Sorry if this sounds ignorant or insensitive, I don’t mean it to come across that way. I just haven’t found any answers that make sense.",3.574997927890593,4.857205716535437,4.907936179030255,83.68573767094905,72.54330708661416,8.3394944053046,25.179444674678827,8.841846274778883,1.7647275590551184,988,30,200,19,19,329,137,254,0.083,0.852,0.064,-0.3373,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,2,3,9,9,0,1,5,0,22,9,4,6,1,51,48,21,0,7,11,0,5,6,0,2,5,2,0,1,25,13,0,4,11,0,1,2,10,3,0,2,4,8,25,6,21,40,3,17,0,0,1,0,7,6,0,8,14,130,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804920412075789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368947678885008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037880726857455,0.0,0.0828287126080253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613570381239361,0.0,0.0856481549237344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4472104666400935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20679638922126464,0.0,0.08670351078283706,0.1055325896071665,0.0,0.3386721622275113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06491275614704861,0.0,0.0,0.20432103136454585,0.0,0.0,0.11535687683455127,0.10302244858917954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15267930325229592,0.14381282055979785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103606457871736,0.0,0.0,0.15776086661354755,0.0,0.05720332952992167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900697557602633,0.0,0.18033035200607986,0.0,0.0,0.10698926407437193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050554163903351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063233908748922,0.0,0.11354078965842405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109407880825118,0.29504336593733377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557144670271721,0.0,0.0,0.06718655347109596,0.0,0.0,0.10964045209143634,0.0,0.0,0.10143439071443956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762967663255466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096579116311244,0.0,0.0,0.1071919915436182,0.06820497050698059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631117612143293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289615756167377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140200486392676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08020728333228397,0.0,0.1050028655469471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026028966847092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112672615804557,0.0712425994700876,0.0,0.08038148946506582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567841061876868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133738551236791,0.06449427682979013,0.0,0.0,0.1173829629426938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683366725433971,0.0,0.09832320099033147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830491356878567,0.05936765390777678,0.07989354080179348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915371334897224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DrPhillips,2020/01/03,does anyone know general rates for recovery for people going into psychiatric hospitals I'm doing research into mental health and it be super helpful if anyone knew those rates,9.306,11.233975599999999,9.533333333333337,53.430000000000035,59.66666666666666,11.333333333333336,35.0,11.20814326018867,5.1720000000000015,148,6,15,4,2,49,26,30,0.0,0.8009999999999999,0.19899999999999998,0.7717,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,7,6,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,10,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5518433404202601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3453273508915485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242669183813254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4194537756983967,0.0,0.0,0.26449989907564064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168682659240223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976757718537269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27357406097209463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Monopolah,2020/01/03,"I think my story about suicidal thoughts has some valuable insight. I created a sub called r/Latchkey_Kids thats based on minimal parenting environments. 

I posted my story and decided it was important enough to leave on the sidebar/community info

https://www.reddit.com/r/Latchkey_Kids/comments/ehta80/how_i_stopped_having_suicidal_thoughts/",16.586395348837208,22.195625720930238,10.555988372093022,38.528401162790715,47.6046511627907,12.672093023255815,43.30813953488372,11.698219412168324,7.141934883720933,298,14,27,9,4,80,38,43,0.131,0.711,0.158,0.0516,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,4,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,1,4,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,18,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36993453471595206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3743383061354881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3836085875835544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40227575404098587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34696986420277504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3962821069333269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23213825458506016,0.0,0.2876146339197736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GrayBirdJuice,2020/01/03,"Do I worry too much? I really have no idea where to post this so I'm sorry if this doesn't belong here. 


I always worry that people can hear what I'm doing. For example, I always have the volume on my phone and TV down to one of the lowest levels and when someone walks by, even though they wouldn't be able to hear it, I turn the volume all the way down or I pause it if I can. I don't prefer calling people or talking inside in my room because I'm worried people will hear. I have nothing to hide, really. I just get weird about them (my family/anyone) hearing me in general. 


Is there a reason, or am I just like that?",1.6615909090909111,3.0703213712121236,4.01878787878788,87.62318181818182,77.71212121212122,6.315151515151516,18.81818181818182,6.980632752743323,0.22185454545454555,479,9,102,5,11,167,85,132,0.136,0.8320000000000001,0.032,-0.8993,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,0,11,2,0,0,5,0,14,0,0,1,1,15,23,10,0,4,7,0,0,1,0,2,0,4,1,0,7,2,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,4,17,1,13,20,2,12,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,5,2,77,24,0,0.13767393857366647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291114914451244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962648189292218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0839247551112086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405804841528312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093233799406808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719289506224765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6206741384384105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541711892027102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726053220784386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120618581804533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210185714808947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932914238070517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28633732272446616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185357656192045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17639490078593145,0.14155173841581922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665068138465035,0.0,0.0,0.1541147027018541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11065709682940747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352639456398613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497497111014799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092791642454161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4194437024207078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fabian_thegreat,2020/01/03,"Those that have gone to therapy, how many sessions before any changes? Hello and happy 2020,

I've gone to 2 therapy sessions each 1 hour. The first was the therapist getting to know me and the 2nd was the only real session. I vented but life was back to normal the next day. 

I'm curious to know how many sessions it typically takes in your opinion or through your experience. Let me know Reddit!",3.4583082706766963,5.767120394736844,4.791654135338348,80.04657894736842,75.3157894736842,7.50075187969925,29.27819548872181,8.418075326091056,2.4476827067669173,314,14,56,6,7,104,53,76,0.0,0.925,0.075,0.68,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,0,5,1,0,2,0,13,13,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,5,1,7,7,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,5,34,8,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312301553814369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14838647168430413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16420818490199107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20414279932507126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244534207816144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18876735286359347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16414510934243054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082188607660217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20542631801435016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19004228223735534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181633441349931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973308209270408,0.1363045082381212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39129432688918503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20523194311559645,0.0,0.18907530265470432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676678496670115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21964869806845996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509377878649266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4413692702986028,0.22405976709469108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,holisticthings,2020/01/03,"Is it normal to have no idea how the world works? I feel like this is something I’ve struggled with for the longest time, understanding people and how the world works. Put me in my element and I become a genius but in any other aspect of reality I am almost autistic. I don’t know about etiquettes, these mind games that people play and politics . How do I have a better understanding of the world? Being someone who cannot stand social settings is weird",3.6595689655172414,6.0116979885057535,4.655847701149425,81.05204741379312,74.86206896551724,6.648850574712642,24.66810344827586,7.645422480735847,1.4388172413793106,363,12,64,5,8,118,63,87,0.063,0.831,0.106,0.6917,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,4,5,0,1,6,0,10,0,0,3,0,16,14,7,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,5,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,1,7,3,8,13,0,9,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,2,45,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21748846786516304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14769940217683514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398737646025673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19209048749605045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981983783586267,0.15516347300685154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451856459567197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936416998753435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611004213270094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21930407584524045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128040547337057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30115001453918144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21834001005641426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22140198249630988,0.18402781408693691,0.16720659114311176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22705837936760634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266475974195199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4522133324626644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3162397109271875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GotMadSkill,2020/01/03,"How much does Therapy/Counseling usually cost? I’m at a point in life where I really do need to seek professional help but being a broke college student, the idea of therapy seems way too expensive. Any estimates on what good therapy or counseling usually cost? (I live in California just in case that mattered)",5.28089285714286,7.911806732142857,6.899428571428577,65.54557142857146,70.96428571428572,13.051428571428573,36.2,11.979248473330829,6.050854285714285,251,14,40,12,5,86,46,56,0.064,0.831,0.105,0.3313,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,8,5,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,4,1,10,0,1,0,0,1,7,0,2,2,23,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654622526438042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014525714297448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19308371374079572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15430050551782065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598716501071469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625994893412575,0.0,0.0,0.20327384472220286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692260073555873,0.1706929251966261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21761664807900288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14747421087262086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20956855529953247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5265153654059762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5070731067815445,0.0,0.0,0.1827247663068228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crazytoothbrushrat,2020/01/03,Really stupid but nobody else really is listening hi I'm just stupidly stressed and I don't really know what to do I've been struggling alot with my ed lately and I know my ed is triggered by gender dysphoria because I'm trans but I don't know how to be healthy anymore and I feel really fat and I have to see my relatives soon and I feel like they'll talk about how fat I look or call me slurs and I'm so scared of being hate crimed or going to conversation therapy and I feel like my sister is just being really mean and I can't understand why and I want to get a mullet but I feel like everyone in my religious school will make fun of me and I still have to do my science far project and I think I have ADD or autism or I'm on the spectrum but I'm to depressed to find motivation to do anything,0.512362301101593,2.6726083023255818,2.9649449204406366,89.92913708690331,85.16279069767441,6.876866585067319,21.261933904528767,8.032893268588372,1.1165069767441858,636,21,141,14,19,219,92,172,0.152,0.727,0.122,-0.8156,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,1,1,8,11,3,3,3,0,18,2,2,5,0,41,41,22,0,1,10,1,4,3,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,13,2,0,12,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,1,7,23,4,16,35,1,7,0,1,2,0,7,3,0,5,6,86,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691329107900938,0.0,0.0,0.12190511856541075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030367334957401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15126566772152253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759121684970176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237504596120972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415524009289801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.299612505203533,0.3174898846587227,0.0,0.0,0.13539563344711944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739609669140701,0.0,0.08419035439657081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14625580594287546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24423864603786635,0.0,0.16710634500408092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21711852915509194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439878064317465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888340056249642,0.0,0.0,0.16136593085809686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4745056294771318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14831218374348967,0.14992376977512806,0.1180469679723624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183033599722247,0.0,0.169691810597302,0.15486621363314165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906787589256138,0.0,0.0,0.16940894507117346,0.0,0.0,0.09492097868202554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15421709330430725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737575003521884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367168644332672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OneDisplayOneVGA,2020/01/03,"I lost everything, what now? In the past month I lost my job and my car. Finding a job without a car is difficult in my area. We are currently looking eviction in the face and could get a notice any day now.   


With all that going on, my mental health was not in a good place. I have been thinking about suicide more often. I haven't been able to focus on anything and I haven't had motivation to do anything for a long time. More so after the past month. 

On top of all that, my girlfriend of 6 years decided to leave me on Christmas night because she felt like she needed someone else and that my depression was too much of a stress on the relationship. This turned into her bringing someone into our home and getting sexual with them. Among other things, it has been a really traumatic separation with a lot of lies and disrespect.   


I just need to vent to an open forum. I feel like the woman I love and have built a family and life with ripped all of that from me. I feel powerless and defeated. I have to look her in the face everyday and act okay. She seems unaffected and has given me nothing but empty apologies about the things she has done.

   
I have never wanted to end my life more. I have never felt lower. 

What say you, r/mentalhealth?",3.438877551020408,5.183314877551023,4.599744897959184,83.90329081632653,73.6938775510204,7.838775510204082,25.311224489795922,8.548686976883017,1.7262612244897966,975,32,192,18,20,320,140,245,0.114,0.8240000000000001,0.061,-0.8658,7,0,0,0,0,2,25.0,2,1,1,5,8,11,0,1,17,1,21,6,2,1,5,43,41,13,1,4,4,0,4,2,1,0,3,1,1,1,11,19,0,0,9,0,0,5,6,6,0,0,12,7,32,5,35,28,8,39,0,4,2,1,16,17,0,3,19,145,43,3,0.12029396940594606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180402425202288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19798337422126994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333008722160783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604494616127013,0.0,0.0,0.07757965859504358,0.0,0.10360901958086123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231024958763923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004901756536569,0.0,0.10654475175190306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811246310214008,0.0,0.11340244846681337,0.0,0.12164849072201753,0.08593803577947945,0.2310021504864491,0.0,0.10994650872803004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569726812823265,0.0,0.06836583498901196,0.100896874228986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786686427891136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206646594849119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387464059428421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737394452289516,0.0,0.0,0.1699343762134808,0.1175391143372959,0.0,0.0,0.10645637749380413,0.20203327498124835,0.0,0.2626301555051785,0.10226963103588084,0.10857000397900074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212280277176348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19203499741682845,0.0,0.08842990871488808,0.1783929081503145,0.1855562501876928,0.0,0.0,0.11288774135051052,0.0,0.11542530799130114,0.13695548147173045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22966841068866625,0.0,0.0,0.1256815947629598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770633971045789,0.0,0.0,0.1291507043806752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566259271800102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951111182164733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20384937981794515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779633552361373,0.0,0.0,0.13158207802881192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983593613622465,0.0770795183377349,0.0,0.0,0.0701443809390836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308452954307817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095249986490419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595909380702316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746537230471945
mentalhealth,ak24680,2020/01/03,"Concerned for my friends mental health! So my friends and I have this friend we have known for a long time (they’ve known him longer than me). He lived in the U.S. a while ago and moved to Germany, once he moved back to the U.S. about two years ago his mental health seems to have heavily deteriorated. Prior to moving to Germany or even moving back to the US he seemed normal. We all spoke to him either through PlayStation chats or group chats as well as him visiting for holidays. We’re not quite sure what it is and whenever we attempt to address it with him he just ignores us and gets a tad bit aggressive. The best way to describe it is at random moments he snaps into this almost “new person” where he will just constantly pace around the area and find it difficult to stand/sit anywhere for too long. On top of that, he will spend a lot of the time laughing to himself and refuses to tell anyone what is “so funny”. We are all just super concerned about him because we’ve grown up with him and aren’t quite sure what may be the issue or what we can do. Also, it seems that he finds it hard to keep a job. He has had about 3/4 jobs since moving back, I think the longest he kept the job was max 2 months. Furthermore, from what we understand his family isn’t necessarily helping the situation at all at home, don’t have specific details but we’ve just heard it’s not the best at home. If anyone may have some suggestions on what we can do or at least know what may be affecting him it would help a ton!!",5.0572485669619605,5.455777587458748,5.350265763418449,85.10782699322566,68.5049504950495,8.623171790863298,27.828556539864515,8.532816995589336,1.7092217821782183,1191,36,251,17,19,378,162,303,0.028999999999999998,0.865,0.106,0.9738,4,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,9,0,0,7,18,13,1,0,17,0,27,2,0,1,5,60,38,19,0,3,13,0,1,0,3,6,2,2,3,1,19,18,0,4,10,3,1,7,5,3,1,1,5,3,24,10,40,25,11,38,0,0,0,0,44,14,0,15,16,168,43,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15917164419907068,0.0,0.08990313494558637,0.0,0.0,0.07179817849253417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12555452913237825,0.0,0.0,0.07992450898097404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071091372984108,0.0,0.054729927442575474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18844014698784245,0.0,0.09801807022834168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702183222864652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0592997888883256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463794346299723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641172040901778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20809473425447708,0.0,0.046907092470776485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042652793190037,0.0,0.0,0.19086692705398428,0.0,0.0,0.12035720231293527,0.0,0.1801161926491298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370848874547576,0.2672826523771777,0.07980186170165456,0.0,0.0,0.04934152687447444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927864906227662,0.1589074835934056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632896261609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809571326689391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166268221730164,0.4771172666029978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671146619838435,0.0,0.0,0.08796674066210011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956142946104622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783936831282901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19098720805346694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24520093039198398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426812807710938,0.1009180909241778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16923587371337176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847292858169448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057528316217382525,0.0,0.0,0.10470454965364337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770341301763927,0.09346563671088408,0.21599201567550574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126432150098866,0.0,0.0,0.08072428941386647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377815312383528,0.0,0.0,0.05781629841427635
mentalhealth,Purple5527,2020/01/03,"TRIGGER WARNING: Suicidal thoughts and self harm. I feel happy in general, but when I start to feel sad I feel incredibly sad. Hey guys!

I feel very lucky that I usually wake up and go to bed generally happy. I usually see the good in things and I'm known for being generally a smiley, happy, person.
The thing is, whenever someone is significantly upset with me, I get so sad. Like rocking and shaking and thinking that they'd be better off with me - sad. Sometimes it results in self-harm, but not often.

I end up convincing myself that I am a terrible person and I shouldn't even be here. I've never attempted suicide, and I can't see that ever happening, but I want to make sure this doesn't get any worse. I end up finding peace in thinking about what it would be like to just ""not exist"" anymore. But within an hour or so, I'm back to my normal, happy self, and I have almost forgotten what I was so distressed about earlier. Does anyone else experience this?

(I am currently seeing a psychologist for OCD and Anxiety if this helps provide context. I trust the psychologist immensely, and I will mention my feelings to her.)",4.286274509803917,6.043288259259263,5.918071895424838,75.26352941176471,71.5,8.971241830065358,30.76143790849673,9.478462496947786,3.080534640522876,888,39,158,21,17,303,126,216,0.157,0.586,0.257,0.9845,1,0,0,0,0,1,34.0,0,0,1,2,12,21,0,3,7,0,16,1,1,3,3,47,36,20,2,5,9,0,5,2,0,3,0,0,1,5,13,12,0,0,10,1,0,2,6,9,0,0,2,8,25,12,21,26,0,22,0,4,3,0,10,9,0,5,13,110,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908518138696996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408124318203381,0.0,0.08333689782497296,0.0,0.10803673863983901,0.07617164069223302,0.1116193537728694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376622173323944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634637586489966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533195009032673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910033119772804,0.0,0.19297260095629032,0.0,0.0,0.0719521986747982,0.09854021559027552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656178933622423,0.0,0.0,0.27541039411891505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956691158620334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383070665126407,0.0,0.06191169803041261,0.09137161581485102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786526313116757,0.0963330813039616,0.4638640250505587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301851739364368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072815046539654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644273056538256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271663458035009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401932435347673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673563126529023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902400655731972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604272765055033,0.0,0.3409367474319902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230239964891784,0.0,0.10774198401390396,0.0,0.07710653106278614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383199117642117,0.0,0.10267231499979976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474648359176387,0.13960551683227418,0.0,0.0864842153842046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23995855582664255,0.08988485552582813,0.06425416652696288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101663061423707,0.07738608232349597,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Uniszo,2020/01/03,"Acknowledging that I may some need help Hey y'all! This is my first post :)

Since July of last yr, I haven't been feeling like myself. I barely eat, I don't have the energy/desire to get out of bed most days and I'm just pessimistic. I also feel nauseous like ALL the time. Sometimes I have good days where I'll have some energy to actually go out and go to Target or something. But 95% of the time, I just wanna stay in bed and watch Judge Judy.

These past 3 weeks or so have been really bad. I cry a lot (which isn't normal cause I've never been much of an emotional person). I've noticed a slight weight change (lost about 20 lbs in 1 month w/o even trying) and just an overall feeling of weakness and defeat. It's just mentally and physically draining to feel like this and not really know why.... I know I should probably try to seek help but have always been very reluctant. Talking to someone about my problems is just an uncomfortable thought but I guess I just need to shake that off.",2.5117476270240107,4.510517798994979,3.7236767169179217,88.05682719151312,77.04020100502512,6.834282523729763,22.110831937465104,7.793537801064563,0.928614517029593,778,22,161,12,18,253,121,199,0.152,0.794,0.054000000000000006,-0.9433,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,3,12,10,0,1,8,0,16,3,0,1,2,44,31,14,0,6,12,0,5,3,0,2,1,0,2,1,7,9,2,0,8,0,0,3,5,6,0,1,6,6,16,4,20,23,6,21,0,2,1,0,6,6,0,8,13,98,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.13205479546460794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821699048310733,0.11259878184959958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129882551559517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390130163713094,0.14315278053011726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864491218109765,0.1745430482022862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846823520408358,0.0,0.15221908675756682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893789344592564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736915676654577,0.19334819195022596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11510486233399675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070018329264563,0.0,0.1538132733241884,0.1135017110215476,0.0,0.0,0.14907248889200336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814070285728306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873891389186744,0.11030552785461842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19833454739583672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14771999748991851,0.11504596348317915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637279325910226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801276525852366,0.0,0.09947727341721367,0.2006791633922946,0.10436870343102772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13258687249357345,0.0,0.1540650451226321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918020394567525,0.0,0.1181579900653336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296011126263488,0.0,0.14590005210231585,0.1294849214082128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17338153427135336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193979399010053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146579295782146,0.1041775214655506,0.13383696266479628,0.0,0.0,0.14423529478181915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876673385008966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743058809810184,0.15781474532232848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837495715434712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116548591827344,0.0,0.0,0.10854718198615156,0.1647857948192027,0.0,0.0,0.12210709760030468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,waveshost,2020/01/03,"Can’t Stop Thinking Hey everyone. I’m going through an upsetting break-up and with anxiety and depression not helping, I can’t distract myself from thinking so (too) much about it. What have you found to be the best distractions to stop thinking about things that make you anxious/upset? I’m so sick of thinking about it and just want to get my mind off of it. I’ve tried lots of things, so literally anything you can think of, I’m thankful for. TIA!!",2.6200252525252523,5.093527113636366,3.375606060606064,88.27646464646465,79.0,6.638383838383841,27.959595959595962,7.793537801064563,1.8362080808080816,358,16,70,6,9,113,60,88,0.21,0.642,0.147,-0.6697,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,3,0,1,8,6,0,3,2,0,5,1,0,1,0,18,19,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,6,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,6,2,15,17,3,4,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,47,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790261616631564,0.21841628142960914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591002437408849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028957204578776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16652125799862433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18474221390321746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119845291720681,0.0,0.0,0.10101083525536096,0.0,0.10987812540405092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959001394301095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436858184782824,0.0,0.0,0.129054245765564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19521570504630453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212526769847725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232775220406266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17799914356582416,0.0,0.0,0.25688961507853564,0.6194141403640215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312634340889428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140354342068648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Frigidinak,2020/01/03,"A question about suicidal ideation First let me say that I have zero intention or desire to commit suicide. But every so often I do have visions of doing it. Visions of me hanging from a rope (this is the most common), putting a gun to my head and pulling the trigger, or just me laying in a coffin. It kinda creeps me out. Why does this happen? Life is difficult. It has always been exponentially difficult for me. But I do not want to die, yet why do I have visions of dying? are these fleeting thoughts?",2.4541836734693883,4.879485234693881,4.0054693877551015,83.8002448979592,79.3061224489796,5.960816326530613,27.1469387755102,7.1686216300943375,1.5982538775510204,395,17,72,5,10,131,69,98,0.16699999999999998,0.708,0.125,-0.7704,0,0,0,1,0,3,14.0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,6,0,13,2,1,2,1,18,16,6,5,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,2,0,2,2,1,10,0,11,13,1,8,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,6,3,60,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542293229048211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4376052406150083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18449400323945767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17762879427612185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17932727281626254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18643147231668175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21636683324711195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155824081582504,0.14891162967220778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21193692449268292,0.2361717695473736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676561611337605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4612157260120416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167371160436111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434979454571145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3804727682247428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ohwaitimagiraffe,2020/01/03,"I want to help my friend, but I do not know how What are some good methods to help someone who is:

-Currently unemployed for a duration longer than 3 months (actively seeking)
-Dealing with depression (on antidepressants)
-Drinking alcohol in unhealthy manners
-In a very bad mental state, very down on himself

He has not been physically violent to himself. I do not know if he ever will be but up until now he hasn’t been. 

I just don’t know what to do. I feel helpless to do anything for him other than letting him know I care about him and his wellbeing. I hang out with him from time to time and he’s in fairly good moods.

What are your suggestions?",4.1959523809523835,5.977054468253968,4.963682539682541,81.9174285714286,71.77777777777777,8.532063492063491,30.853968253968247,9.120678840339163,2.745212063492064,517,23,98,11,10,167,81,126,0.13,0.698,0.172,0.4641,3,0,3,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,5,9,1,0,2,0,15,2,0,1,1,21,22,7,0,2,7,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,5,5,2,0,5,1,0,1,5,4,0,0,2,1,16,4,23,17,1,17,0,2,0,0,18,8,0,2,7,74,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21254318213086426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16366202230136834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16605723140642845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20277231659700784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050374592237828,0.1712958145092983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19482755219441336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798991462938802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005601509711805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536548781202164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33362370037693045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666113294774985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4371989320339836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20336917912694927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004251544243348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587448246778072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685111281546207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319380863715909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3281951166228421,0.11730509858115397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jackrobson253,2020/01/03,"I need suggestions for how to cope with mental health issues I am 17 years old and I suffer from severe anxiety, depression and stress, I have seen my GP about it and he told me that as I am under 18 he cannot prescribe any medication and suggested a local youth councillor, I was referred to this same councillor a few years ago but as I am at an age in between a youth and an adult the support they provide there seemed aimed towards younger people and didn’t really help me, I don’t know what do do any more and it gets worse every day, I constantly feel sad and worthless and I can’t sleep anymore because of how I feel... any help is appreciated",8.039033078880408,6.0043825343511505,8.328053435114509,74.24210559796441,63.351145038167935,11.78676844783715,36.337150127226465,10.504223727775694,3.537747073791348,516,19,104,10,6,171,91,131,0.157,0.728,0.115,-0.4255,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,1,6,0,12,3,1,2,0,20,21,14,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,10,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,3,15,1,14,17,3,14,0,4,1,0,9,5,0,1,9,68,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16340997291545184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760810455494241,0.0,0.14102277589955586,0.0,0.1828198694667436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123744873788031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992105447734416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11888673116253558,0.0,0.15877535271482485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15531790337467075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18641988988748495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631221375844697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19594921907911786,0.0,0.0,0.24712400590068345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19240740629272865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131072793444176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18570734467146102,0.1857755525306172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13668885695460073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19343818324951426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12780102770210874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180955876832014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16781999748684567,0.0,0.20825642647338835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18447728862523294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21116560955870264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091915653304666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761487423668352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18786244543343014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374231869121759
mentalhealth,Faded-Martian,2020/01/03,"Am I lazy or is something wrong with me? I have goals in life and I would love to get my life started. I am a 17 year old male that hasn't had a job yet, but I'm almost graduated. I cannot wait to graduate high school and start working and saving money, moving out, getting my license, getting an apartment, and having the life I have planned out. I know what I want to do as of these next few years transitioning from being a kid to an adult.

My issue is, I feel stuck. I have had an alcohol and drug abuse issues since I was 13 and I still do have them. This stems from boredom. All I do is lay down, watch YouTube, and eat junk food. I'm still pretty skinny surprisingly haha. Anyway, I have an issue with having absolutely no motivation which is weird and contradictory to what I said up there. Yes, I stand by this still. I just have no motivation. I don't want to do anything but lay down and relax. I don't like putting effort into anything because I'd rather be doing nothing. 

I hate doing nothing with my life, but I feel like I can't get anywhere. I'm stuck with no job which is probably most of the problem, I have too much free time on my hands. It drives me crazy sitting doing nothing. Makes me forget what life is really about. I have recently got to see family again for the holidays. Have been getting closer with a few friends again. This is what life is about. I'm just having a hard time myself. I'm not doing anything. 

TL;DR - I have no motivation and would rather be laying down watching youtube then anything. I have life goals, but am stuck. Also, everyday tasks require effort for me, and that effort that has to be put in is annoying/can be a challenge because I am a lazy ass.",2.216644736842106,4.2796902076023375,3.7249086257309973,87.39245065789477,78.21052631578947,6.263304093567253,23.55299707602339,7.292943589461545,0.951306725146198,1329,44,271,17,32,439,166,342,0.161,0.6940000000000001,0.145,-0.6292,2,0,3,0,1,0,45.0,0,0,1,12,16,14,1,0,14,2,52,15,3,4,1,48,79,19,0,7,10,0,4,2,1,2,9,1,0,3,14,19,4,2,6,2,2,4,10,4,0,0,9,8,38,11,33,63,5,36,0,0,3,2,7,13,1,3,19,192,52,13,0.0,0.11052767684914327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969348095986336,0.0934116265458102,0.0,0.0,0.07460011978529209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070629985036792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373155221426752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081811855260627,0.09545402146712913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794095969129533,0.0,0.0943355735588243,0.06664294680236954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280080244475175,0.0,0.0720718938744235,0.0,0.2436882655361212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460867525110203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356519264982178,0.09209979623885584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985609078317198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29209645559621417,0.1851422817171831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051267091902724986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.461230539179669,0.091148847805624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841935114513438,0.0,0.06226857788311081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09914737668147353,0.06857533627306718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920984063410426,0.0,0.0,0.2685289205300241,0.0,0.0978870976483982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490455838050743,0.10057719508668224,0.08926131288921466,0.0,0.18755473041488216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059760871040022735,0.0,0.0921078551208183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873556237417274,0.0,0.0,0.0944095761438936,0.07433620584686901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716645975019945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718154842929038,0.0,0.0,0.13205545230436286,0.0,0.22349298089546374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879067004518886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004402488615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791271754785567,0.0,0.0,0.1325342219710365,0.1019926933989798,0.0,0.1201451869059798
mentalhealth,zickkityy,2020/01/03,"I cant stop worrying that I will develop schizophrenia Background: I'm diagnosed with depression, anxiety, ADD, and OCD. I also went through some trauma as a kid. When I was about 4 or 5, I was on a cruise ship with my parents, and I fell and busted my head. I had to get quite a few stitches. I was also abused once. Aside from this, I had a pretty normal happy childhood. It wasn't until late middle school-early high school that I began having more mental health issues. I've also struggled with drug abuse. I used to smoke weed almost daily, and I recently quit abusing xanax, so its possible I could just be having problems recovering from drug abuse.

Ever since I had a bad LSD trip, I have been unable to stop worrying about developing schizophrenia. The LSD trip started off normal, but at the peak, I smoked weed and ended up having intense anxiety and paranoia. I kept worrying that the people I did the LSD with and I we're going to be caught. My worry of developing it is such an irrational worry as well. Nobody in my family has it to my knowledge, so the likeliness of me developing it is quite low. 

I've never had delusions or hallucinations. I've had strange thoughts before, and there have been a few times where a thought like ""what if someone is reading my mind?"" Every time I've had a thought like this, I've been able to dismiss it as nonsense almost immediately. 

I also struggle with emotional numbness from my depression, and trouble concentrating from brain fog. These are symptoms of schizophrenia, but also symptoms of other things, yet for some reason I just assume this means I might develop schizophrenia. I also have some social anxiety. 

I'm really just scared of losing control and becoming unable to care for myself. 

I also fear abandonment, which may be a clue to what I might actually have.

What can I do to work on this and get better? I just wish I could go back to what I was before the LSD.",5.5536065573770514,6.725781595628416,6.336539890710387,75.70818688524592,67.7431693989071,8.916109289617486,30.213770491803277,9.174902378510234,2.687562098360656,1528,57,267,28,25,503,193,366,0.2,0.705,0.095,-0.991,1,0,4,0,3,0,46.0,0,0,0,7,23,20,0,4,16,0,39,10,2,3,2,56,57,30,0,7,9,1,0,2,0,4,8,0,0,1,21,17,0,5,7,2,0,8,3,14,1,0,22,0,38,6,39,26,6,34,0,5,0,0,3,10,0,12,18,197,59,3,0.07203603441544508,0.3414036854511355,0.0702967782665836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426736576691154,0.0,0.0,0.4032503348729032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16532210746955606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05539126394643815,0.06014707978972895,0.0,0.07955814042806944,0.12259471916581495,0.0,0.0,0.06371001849421734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08041603815458095,0.0,0.0,0.07344553803657038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079453794525625,0.1150298237105282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240890617731752,0.07311505858506473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707785998922456,0.0,0.0,0.0810308429322158,0.06380254506428955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516071726957175,0.06069346588370082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790916220399752,0.08106056592706444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527170960878796,0.0,0.08187947685872397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668369813985833,0.0,0.0,0.07392975370667865,0.0765709360267848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611002541265219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518690438042262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812597844894266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038633546948082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058989640689451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846835956554755,0.0,0.0,0.07259537963465369,0.15283769750932705,0.07273585959452983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055558630621847536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14116003805766372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671602565061601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998749132843233,0.0,0.0,0.04994071608105935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812098051903529,0.0,0.07328654442235483,0.0,0.06892875625663038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298575690747097,0.07205552838940811,0.0,0.04614812823461587,0.07406504096366735,0.07112689349330685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212063723766977,0.14580862529752298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059588952068295925,0.0,0.0,0.07343166537482138,0.061035898194439275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05098747592668638,0.0,0.0,0.12045070066282385,0.0,0.15061540774188156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14974604372520334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04785754037876497,0.0,0.0,0.17156569446820955,0.08400958193217876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221600491071925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476904611943142,0.06677812560126371,0.0,0.0,0.08283788449105807,0.0,0.0,0.05244309099947314,0.36578044830603335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,250913vjhdwvhj,2020/01/03,"looking for ways to get better this year for all of my life I've had anxiety. but these past few years my anxiety has gotten so out of control, I get nervous when I have to see my family. I can't do things like stand up for myself, speak up when I need to, or make new friends, because when I do I just get tongue-tied, and nothing seems to come out properly. my anxiety has led to feelings of depression and very low self esteem. I can't do things like talk to new people, because I'm scared of what they'll think. my anxiety has ruined many of the things I used to enjoy. looking back, I used to be so confident with everyone and I could go up to anyone. this year I've decided things will change, I've already seen a therapist and begun to get more exercise. I'm hopeful about the future, but I'm looking for ways to talk to new people and things I can do to manage my anxiety and increase my confidence level.",5.93313829787234,5.05015539893617,6.868595744680853,79.30300000000003,66.81914893617022,10.498723404255319,32.629787234042546,9.888512548439397,2.9113919148936165,717,26,149,14,10,241,100,188,0.161,0.703,0.136,-0.0899,0,0,0,1,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,8,11,0,2,3,0,16,2,0,5,1,27,39,14,0,3,4,0,1,2,1,2,2,1,0,1,9,10,0,1,4,1,0,4,2,5,0,0,3,7,20,6,29,32,4,27,0,3,5,0,6,7,0,3,15,95,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123859397179094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4202315478020561,0.0,0.0,0.076820057626688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844792881213799,0.0,0.13394518570047742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716653178009893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162224437735718,0.09463884020307596,0.0,0.0,0.12322277130760373,0.08771814296555809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462643434517501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498057235935307,0.0,0.0,0.1035708028879874,0.0,0.0555509692450703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488131060242145,0.0,0.2295993985469811,0.0,0.062438726109090674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912058558906132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760079266652753,0.10734883247445254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767764115695564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333564051024707,0.11138571396138083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08146339420554069,0.0,0.31832447031351396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054182866761538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048784308215105,0.1523329074736211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999388095910036,0.0,0.08754806122463778,0.10001683323304436,0.1146129992158252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17661040969675867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756155871858954,0.3649466228417988,0.07039695975166523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18977591158404375,0.0,0.09065000725348324,0.0,0.17441120833357454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21224808407812965
mentalhealth,JimboByTheWater,2020/01/03,"I get jealous of people that hook up, is that bad? So  I'm raised in a traditional household where you respect women and  date  and marry and etc. But as I went to college I was introduced to  the hook  up culture. Now that I've left college and go on these dating  apps to  find someone a lot of people hook up or have hooked up. They  always have  stories and experiences and it makes me kinda jealous. I  want to do  that kind of stuff too but I cant get myself to do it. And  when I'm  talking to someone and we talk about our past they mention  they've  hooked up a lot and they love sex and so on. It makes me see  them  negatively (sorta like their below me and I'm superior because I  don't).  I know this is not good and I should get counseling but I just  wanted  to post it online and see what people thought. I've thought  about just  giving in a finding someone to hook up but the thought of  STD's and  pregnancy and getting attached comes into play. So I'm not  sure how to  see people who have hooked up as not a bad thing they've  done and not  internally judge them. If you can help or give guidance on  what I can do  to help myself I'd really appreciate it. Thank you.",1.9455074160811885,3.581702270491803,3.6914285714285695,89.29166666666669,77.52459016393442,6.28696330991413,23.914129586260728,7.07126945348624,0.7884834504293514,910,30,199,10,21,305,122,244,0.067,0.785,0.14800000000000002,0.9714,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,2,3,6,0,12,13,2,0,7,0,15,3,0,3,1,49,41,30,0,4,13,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,16,19,0,0,6,1,0,3,7,4,0,0,6,3,26,9,32,34,3,25,0,0,3,3,22,16,0,7,6,137,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102074702925127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20485554798412292,0.0747810106948955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567290021463613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255382259792023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368140817825544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11999883792564794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242438637829555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563686778064196,0.23536040631964264,0.06971853479498244,0.10289323955114604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16445176622634625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277462282224237,0.06741849334213025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328580059114575,0.0,0.0,0.05993238314147164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20858631598637106,0.11071819134978636,0.0,0.16377186798119467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710633743067453,0.3401871809993327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748790575523907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858818857867625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2932661955046437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118241753806684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14043252869620204,0.0,0.0,0.1156189152214605,0.0,0.0,0.19720163688296133,0.0,0.11294185661192095,0.0,0.0,0.08149924064258855,0.0,0.0,0.2921686678591122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471275985782564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372014702312712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheClinicalTrial,2020/01/03,"Antidepressants Story's I've recently been prescribed 150mg of Bupropion so help with depression. I told my doctor that the worst of the symptom are unable to eat, low energy, drowsiness during the day, being unable to sleep some nights. They asked if I smoked and I told them I used a E-cig because I'm slowly taking myself off cigarettes. They instantly recommended Bupropion, and after looking at the side effects it seems like all the side effects are only going to make my current symptoms worse. After taking it for 3 weeks now I haven't felt much better, my nicotine cravings haven't slowed down, and sleeping has been the absolute worst even though I take it the moment I wake up. I have to refill soon, so should I ask for something else or will this eventually go away? I'd also really like to hear about other people's experiences with antidepressants on what worked for them",8.203757575757578,8.135969618181818,8.080000000000002,69.78666666666669,61.90909090909091,10.727272727272727,33.484848484848484,10.25414643259724,3.458757575757576,717,25,118,14,9,231,115,165,0.11900000000000001,0.8059999999999999,0.075,-0.8548,2,0,3,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,4,4,8,7,0,0,8,0,11,7,3,4,1,16,27,9,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,2,3,1,0,0,7,5,1,0,4,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,5,3,17,3,21,19,5,22,0,2,1,0,10,9,0,4,13,81,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079088262157897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824139569770607,0.0,0.14191204412541156,0.0,0.0,0.09207582114762272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358730520894413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741173152983797,0.0,0.13009510717446476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546012786883026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15455706419746107,0.12617897770415915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976400501356693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775129991013514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502718801239248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168506498656613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702390459349024,0.0,0.10124248972942343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14758622114909767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268400215918496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082391963631132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11103568490688223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417457946141087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487676726669638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471580199084757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676349555382206,0.0,0.14913902482255384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375059805301323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30230879320494825,0.0,0.0,0.11628206172594187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139878298538921,0.34070183375516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840125359858522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886605398763625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045465428084585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115943956359712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996278715698264,0.0,0.15392807860181926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SeanSchram7326,2020/01/03,Which Open Minded People with Depression and Anxiety Want to be Helped? This is no trick or scam. I'm not asking for money. All I'm getting out of this is experience and helping others. I'm an advocate for Mental Health and pursuing a career in Councelling and volunteering to do this. Who wants me to message them the life changing things I've learned on my personal mental health journey to have a discussion and are open to change to prevent Depression and Anxiety from getting in the way of your goals?,6.814035087719297,7.706724736842109,7.105,72.32416666666668,64.78947368421052,10.543859649122806,35.833333333333336,10.504223727775694,4.028122807017544,410,19,69,10,6,133,66,95,0.179,0.7759999999999999,0.045,-0.9282,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,1,1,0,3,1,0,5,0,6,3,0,0,1,18,14,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,7,10,0,1,1,0,1,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,16,13,1,8,0,2,0,0,9,6,0,1,0,48,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875511397353185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757009548570478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976366879725137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237493613623363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18384392013380135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19638449647593606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3995483773243709,0.0,0.0,0.25194791798493765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13274941215345706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3788038600458845,0.0,0.1897684433694388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029573039060466,0.1641042236590846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486070820906747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217068225454686,0.14918008298414587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wonderfulr,2020/01/03,"I can’t understand what my mother is saying, could it be my schizophrenia? I told her to speak up many times but she keeps on saying words in low tone voice. She does this over the phone and in person. It hurts my self esteem telling her every time to speak up because i might sound angry. I’m not a mind reader. It drives me nuts and i want to punch the wall. Can she be messing with me knowing my mental illness? am i in risk of becoming dumb? What do you think? What can i do?",0.2107666666666681,2.4629696100000054,1.5839999999999996,98.54866666666668,87.9,4.133333333333334,16.333333333333336,5.46131890053228,-0.8038666666666665,371,8,84,2,12,118,71,100,0.23399999999999999,0.753,0.013000000000000001,-0.9785,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,1,3,0,11,1,0,0,0,14,18,3,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,2,7,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,1,6,18,0,12,13,0,12,0,2,0,0,16,9,1,1,2,55,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843391175687114,0.25080660636178803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18131544779705205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19873079662183865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913358221386391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431079759525061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018508775191064,0.0,0.0,0.12480448808299845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302368691620833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288565407103115,0.24091000638156826,0.2292994030221855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19828902977926446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.361187267614623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369077430690715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198489473277298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14551215802568854,0.0,0.0,0.2648397515692616,0.0,0.0,0.21699729205166515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364120383369803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394545782475611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tarnatia,2020/01/03,"Losing motivation and energy in university (F21) The last semester of uni I've just lost so much motivation and energy. The courses that I've been taking (I can not choose courses myself - they are all required for my degree) this autumn have been so boring and difficult. And I've been questioning if I'm on the right path, but I really don't want to quit either since I'm halfway through my degree and I'd be disappointing myself (and my family even though I know they support me with whatever I do). I've also gotten quite good grades so far which motivates me, but I know if I would fail a course my mind would go so negative and my self esteem would take a big hit. 

As soon as I open up my book to study I get an headache and all my energy just goes away and I get really stressed out about all the things I have to study on. One day I feel like get my shit together and I clean my apartment, make a good dinner, study, take care of my skin. The next day I just lie in my bed the whole day, watch YouTube and only eat a chocolate bar for the whole day. I can get cry attacks suddenly when I am alone in my apartment, and I cry much more easily and often than what I did in the past. When I'm in my uni town I miss my home and family, but now during the Christmas break I haven't been much happier either and I haven't gone to meet friends even though I have some great friends in my hometown. 

Though while I actually spend time with friends I usually have a good time. But what saddens me is that I used to be much more motivated, and happy. 

Sorry for the rambly and badly written post - but it kind of mirrors how my mind is at the moment. I'd be grateful for any kind of advice on what to do, thoughts on what's going on with me, or any nice comment.",4.2892382321236076,4.580484798898073,5.420864774224459,84.30821415738414,70.15702479338843,8.957671577434422,26.801892442208647,8.964715089967882,1.778921044436459,1374,40,299,24,23,457,180,363,0.152,0.6679999999999999,0.18,0.9418,0,2,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,2,10,20,25,2,1,17,0,26,5,2,7,3,61,53,39,0,6,14,0,2,1,3,3,0,0,3,1,10,22,3,1,10,2,1,3,5,11,0,1,10,3,48,14,37,36,14,45,0,5,1,0,9,22,1,6,19,200,58,8,0.0,0.0,0.08997755697715494,0.0,0.0,0.0901004348985177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549527518033037,0.0,0.07373530353692961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540342015734238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489507370869214,0.0866284559068535,0.0,0.07698627778170063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09400786560007568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20256297407576487,0.237855157161583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434745234935958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179941121518008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17384297437669766,0.0,0.04662098513186072,0.0658703756134851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21370915971477036,0.0,0.19269060992833845,0.0,0.10480302904319036,0.23200838639403198,0.0,0.10165495709000616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815260370016074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924878765432794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19203202858354146,0.10134553654291542,0.07515836045571014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04504609362111342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315240861018728,0.10065128225030334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154671740794365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18619900121539992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711214539491147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980597314596852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062479645535265915,0.0701251048085135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801891002858478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830570260332042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328929898176648,0.1961400700291786,0.0,0.0,0.1181361632782834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874149654395808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618861749803097,0.0,0.09464582177124928,0.07627189271179989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321454645712988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561908119931243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463171996151988,0.0,0.0,0.2079772295913112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061256072787389385,0.0,0.2717691412265014,0.07319947623012983,0.10752949326161124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963443367939223,0.10154940138739256,0.0,0.054384159172660346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058843825221324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964966902370555,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,panickedflea69,2020/01/03,Latuda obliterating my sex drive I finally found a mood stabilizer that works perfect for me. I’ve been on it for about a year and it has caused some serious problems in my relationship. It is literally slaying my sex drive with the worlds strongest sword. I. Feel. Nothing. Towards my SO. Him and I used to be all over each other then I started these meds and now we are lucky if we have sex twice a month. I hate it. I don’t wanna do it. I loathe having to do it or to do sexual favors. I know he needs release because he’s human but I literally have to talk myself into it for hours before finally giving in. It’s not an attraction problem because I am attracted to him completely. I just don’t want sex anymore. I would be perfectly fine if we went two-three months without sex at a time. He also bugs me a lot about how he wants sex and it makes me feel terrible. I want to be able to help him but I would literally be forcing myself. It almost feels like rape sometimes. But it’s not because I’m consenting and making him truly believe I want sex. What do I do? My relationship is in shambles because of this medicine but my life has turned around and I’m finally stable.,1.3424494242141307,3.7691336806722684,3.5150046685340826,85.5619125427949,84.04201680672271,6.55113600995954,24.36103330220977,7.793537801064563,1.536820230314348,928,37,185,18,27,316,135,238,0.084,0.741,0.175,0.9637,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,3,0,0,3,8,15,2,0,7,0,23,9,0,5,3,51,43,17,0,12,11,0,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,16,13,0,0,5,0,0,3,5,6,0,1,3,3,34,8,25,34,4,24,0,0,0,8,17,10,0,7,12,131,50,1,0.12367688502142687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12384453525993155,0.0,0.0,0.09890436026840724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12265423697088647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009864869137012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015691247268697,0.0,0.1052399199202291,0.13934149737986312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270502292829165,0.0,0.0,0.12967286089375984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18760424742431112,0.08835479137111747,0.0,0.4064459467877776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13560532080730686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11864213767242505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210531905406685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289800903301421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179681893478105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796958157780797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735664145065493,0.060422278860703824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514566491795543,0.0,0.0,0.16511056223710735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737713830087855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19743541935558687,0.0,0.0,0.09170484313926816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867130676209373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366841520746853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26556537946174924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223196016959526,0.0,0.0875391357795997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940679538308247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721169862391572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452493619175168,0.12081434571167415,0.0,0.0,0.10681711935250224,0.0,0.0,0.29179132457294443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11464971148055204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922010374072145,0.0,0.09003824528019021,0.0,0.0,0.17571302131207595,0.0,0.0,0.07964385904784392
mentalhealth,Drewbidoo,2020/01/03,"I talk too much. I have too much to say. Hey guys. I have run into a large problem.
I always have something to say!
I hate this. I will talk out of turn, say something dumb, maybe worse! It's a compulsive behavior. I don't know if it's due to my tourettes, being lonely, depressed, maybe all of these. Because of this, my relationship with my coworkers has deteriorated. They will pester me non-stop. They will convince me to say or do things I don't want to do. I feel like I'm being used constantly as some sort of running joke. Hell, I know I am! ""It's twitch's fault"", ""Damn it twitch"", ""Quit pulling a twitch!""
I wish it wasn't like this. I feel as though this pressure is forcing me to defend myself, talk out of turn, give my opinions without being prompted, anything and everything. I hate going to work now, and I am starting to really dislike myself! I would really like some advice on this. Maybe one of you fine redditors has gone through this...",1.5354457953394132,3.975776627659573,2.8397264437689977,90.64833333333334,83.25531914893618,5.708611955420466,22.7821681864235,7.07126945348624,0.8009870314083081,738,26,152,10,21,238,103,188,0.192,0.726,0.08199999999999999,-0.9735,0,2,2,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,2,2,4,16,5,1,3,0,20,3,0,1,1,23,36,7,0,5,3,0,2,3,0,4,3,4,0,1,13,6,0,0,4,1,0,5,4,10,0,1,2,6,28,6,23,27,5,13,1,2,0,0,14,4,3,6,7,101,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211801077621805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398400644837934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028386286835168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617978671971397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350468168277614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076353965058821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231384951137924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637590420385708,0.0892776960295609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988140698477792,0.0710226173963072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373870459753335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24676152563844045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137359107507182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18316024841984932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3766437023263339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18373281256807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468205547912855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119578211073936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291964246592913,0.0,0.0,0.16011635544853298,0.0,0.0,0.13416966332915456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39752064596834624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19241408984902825,0.0,0.0,0.08845352055662621,0.0,0.0,0.10447946611888237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3013354292538584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302368090880638,0.0,0.12278115695490913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27186021664127397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079328711473071,0.0,0.0,0.0737098033253972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437078887614084,0.1204654101628742,0.0,0.09097873435517573,0.0,0.1273538270080876,0.08877421055324522,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mr_ButterFingers,2020/01/03,"Feeling like I'm Dreaming For a few months now (I think), I've bedn glong through period, which can last from a couple mins to a week or more, where i feel like i'm dreaming.

I'll be doing literally anything and BAM i'll feel like i'm dreaming. You know when you're dreaming and you're asleep, you get a feeling (i can't really explain it, I'm sorry) and i'll sometimes get that feeling when i'm awake and it'll feel like I'm dreaming all of this up and I don't know what it is or what causes it.

Does anyone know?",0.5456556717618675,2.340786477876108,2.6181335478680623,94.58871279163314,82.45132743362831,5.1710378117457765,21.777152051488336,6.1124844417494595,0.12826371681415916,404,13,94,3,11,136,60,113,0.0,0.8540000000000001,0.146,0.8885,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,7,1,1,1,1,20,26,9,0,0,2,0,6,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,11,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,6,4,6,24,3,10,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,12,45,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955161514560865,0.0,0.14070011637071927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17564124270632056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18918362344423986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962377736260624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5187089128538979,0.4885861424436626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17865763044686828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818946925621976,0.1393696827497978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33412436029877723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364728053053647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953272195895657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16910136227599956,0.191395588031372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955563559390198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714803429192873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway1092173,2020/01/03,"My mother is living her life in paranoia and seclusion - desperate to help her First off, apologies for the long post; I tried to keep it as brief as possible but include all of the relevant info. My father and I desperately want to help my mother with what appears to be a drastic decline in her mental health, but we have no idea where to turn.

# Some important background

* Lives in the US
* Has low self-esteem
* Has always been an anxious person (notably social anxiety, fear of germs, religious persecution)
* In spite of being one of the kindest-hearted people I know, she subscribes to lots of politically- and religiously-extreme media that spread fear, hate, and conspiracy theories
* Absolutely **refuses** any kind of mental or physical health care. Though we've been trying to get her to for years, she has not been to a doctor in over two decades except for a dentist
* Leaves the house for no more than 2-3 hours a week, and stays in the rest
* Is very sedentary (mostly spends her time in front of the computer) and does not exercise
* Has recently become disorganized in ways that are unusual for her (overstocking on unnecessary things, keeping a messy living, etc)
* Lives a relatively ""safe life"" (lives in a safe community, doesn't have a lot of money, and doesn't have enemies)

# Delusions of conspiracy against her

The traits above were always worrying to us, but not nearly as extreme as it has been lately. In the past year, she began showing signs of delusion and paranoia. She believes that there is an international conspiracy (with conspirators coordinating between the US and her home country) to purposely wreak havoc on her life and ravage her savings.

She believes these conspirators are:

* **Actively monitoring her phone calls and emails.** I'm traveling abroad, and she will not let me say via email or over the phone my current location or any possibly identifying information
* **Writing sophisticated software to infect her computer and online information with spyware.** Even in the face of indisputable evidence of the contrary, any time there are computer problems or trivial bureaucratic mistakes, she believes it's the conspirators behind it.

Recent unusual worrying beahviors:

* **Keeps windows, curtains, and doors closed.** She fears people are looking into the house. At one point, she claims the conspirators stopped in front of the house, stepped out of their car, and took photos of the house. Another time, she believed her foreign cousin, who asked for her address (in an appropriate context), was a spy.
* **Has greatly inconvenienced herself to try to evade the conspirators.** She has deleted all of her emails, changed her online identities, canceled her phone plan, and has reduced technological communication to almost nil. She's afraid to go outside and interact with others.
* **Believes we are fools for not seeing the ""obvious"" conspiracy.**
* **Afraid at all times**. Most of conversation with her recently has been focused on this perceived conspiracy. Her voice is  usually loud and shaky when discussing this. Sometimes she cries mid-conversation.

# What to do?

I'm sufficiently convinced that this is not normal aging behavior and could potentially be something serious, but we have no idea what to do from here. It's absolutely tearing me apart to watch this.

It's clear that getting her to a doctor, or having a doctor visit, is out of the question, and even if it were, she would refuse medication. Are there any foods I can introduce to her diet to improve her mood? What can I tell her to calm her down? How can I change her life so that she doesn't live her life afraid?

I'm very desperate for answers, and any constructive advice is extremely appreciated.

edit: formatting",4.603529053106518,7.953588893583728,5.171063146556103,72.76956466069146,78.6870109546166,8.202109627461741,30.99040708899864,8.878822364838785,3.5045772859378497,2969,145,452,78,77,949,326,639,0.155,0.778,0.067,-0.996,1,0,1,0,0,0,137.0,6,0,1,2,11,23,2,7,35,0,50,17,1,1,5,90,70,39,0,7,17,4,0,0,0,2,14,3,5,1,25,33,2,8,9,3,2,10,12,14,0,4,10,6,61,8,90,53,11,65,0,1,3,0,79,31,0,15,21,327,86,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049633971637002,0.0,0.0,0.06199249183577162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302578201503827,0.0,0.0,0.21049975829689585,0.06491653528590813,0.047359887863286536,0.069939064393495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05787615745262933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837315348122129,0.0,0.3487488010906253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321557345091583,0.0,0.06311991479018485,0.0,0.1309821200503061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04942895691854863,0.0,0.06800365895818407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900981391327373,0.054176608247989685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904442218487862,0.08178005540624317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20899306415099647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0526593994219819,0.07486009058192994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468934701319119,0.0,0.035184067953959154,0.0,0.0,0.06825441880382316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06112189753610056,0.0,0.1316118333835012,0.0,0.07336195548688419,0.0829920212045648,0.0,0.06209934508429295,0.0,0.0609674725460433,0.28573671873421475,0.0,0.13977448371785606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16508154903653,0.0,0.06446825062885866,0.03402333193143594,0.0,0.06983556537209215,0.06555223848838616,0.0,0.06330570894918848,0.21863927506223446,0.0,0.0,0.32799841792294243,0.05478713776371393,0.051987608116273586,0.0,0.0,0.10526490749571303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062366372828268776,0.12477855834942245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060657255785521426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390170071691877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05909873674362781,0.0858392171360415,0.0540561768424203,0.0,0.0,0.05852361083079233,0.1395852252097396,0.05929129853368889,0.0,0.0,0.05923814213663421,0.0,0.0,0.06935176869351002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833817374046318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04923218100653685,0.0,0.0,0.049333116277600696,0.0,0.06458414199180064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310799246990619,0.0,0.04766024303758912,0.06122916036283545,0.0,0.0,0.06598630018446924,0.0,0.051758337984193534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05411082035542086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0411293041283374,0.0,0.06082485732202629,0.0,0.14439754394549711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878270101818185,0.12609556910092146,0.06733874846452773,0.06047567883762909,0.0,0.22340516729132706,0.0,0.06818354529858975,0.10216211040760116,0.03651527955668645,0.049140142571287834,0.04965932191251192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257423192542824,0.0,0.04397807305855304,0.0,0.0,0.07973418078448267
mentalhealth,justaweeb1,2020/01/03,"How can a person have goals and dreams while wishing they’d die? It doesn’t make sense, i have big goals that i have to work hard to achieve but at the same time i just want to die. 

Im left wondering.. is it even worth it ?",-0.09306122448979436,1.6995658163265368,0.9952653061224516,105.38187755102041,84.71428571428571,4.736326530612245,15.922448979591836,5.6839178017228535,-1.117256326530612,171,3,46,1,5,53,38,49,0.182,0.68,0.138,-0.644,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,2,0,9,11,4,2,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,4,10,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,27,8,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.579746718488641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18447759650909945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25020143994761984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30169614853666754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034645123743809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864375268675704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24387739848851334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628643543744089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16474068096464306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32118570917945144,0.0,0.3028931730208325,0.20333657091456156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AGreatUnsightlyBeast,2020/01/03,"Abilify So you know... I uh. Used to take antipsychotics. I've stopped off and on here and there. And I just recently quit again. But like. I noticed that whenever I'm off life kind of becomes miserable, I really don't want to take them but at the same time I don't think I have any other choice. But let me get to the point. I'm not asking if I should take them I'm just curious about what they do, to dopamine to be exact if anyone has an awnser. Whenever I take it I notice an increase in over all feeling of well-being and enjoyment. But isnt dopamine what makes you feel pleasure. Whenever I'm on the pills I feel kind of flattened out emotionally and I notice music doesn't sound as good and I'm not sure if it's because of dopamine or what. And you know. Going through this shit storm we call life id like to feel as much pleasure as possible tbh whilst reframing from any sort of drug use. Any thing anyone could say to that?",1.561589855467684,3.6481717202072548,2.9228742841559843,92.19934824106902,80.50259067357513,6.757458412871557,23.11126261248977,7.85451343220497,1.0620528497409332,734,25,162,13,19,238,113,193,0.08199999999999999,0.779,0.139,0.9249,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,1,3,3,1,7,11,1,1,5,0,11,5,1,3,3,40,34,19,0,6,12,0,4,2,0,1,4,2,0,0,10,9,0,1,7,0,0,2,6,2,1,0,0,6,19,9,26,30,4,16,0,1,0,0,10,9,1,5,7,97,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574615098561423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764843099141188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798020579679301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693050615616423,0.13937827032301933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886457383432431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076063730292184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635223378319226,0.0,0.0,0.14195830458002764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255242570108948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593442627668543,0.0,0.07172251511987461,0.10585078919316393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628362977544713,0.13871272316061645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904831451621926,0.17827794934877578,0.1233101432402356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423965242551752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277171069251287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4310394918244465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930003569154747,0.14227182937909966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342295090772959,0.0,0.0,0.08084711705650073,0.0,0.1246075302314264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10035951076624734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12954275167416934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550906687392222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894224999851115,0.0,0.3795475539243597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384184401515904,0.08086402982278182,0.0,0.0,0.07358838553330416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21799300748374595,0.0,0.0,0.0744361821247616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346918831970593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThatDecimal,2020/01/03,How do I tell my friend I don’t wanna hangout with him? Alright. The persons my best friend but sometimes they can be toxic. Sometimes stuff they do trigger my mental illness also I’m one of those types that isolate so hanging out isn’t that ideal for me. How could I tell them I don’t wanna hangout but not in a rude way?,0.2183416252072945,2.603322641791049,1.931243781094529,94.47590381426204,91.23880597014929,2.9777777777777783,22.369817578772803,3.1291,-0.18357247097844093,255,10,51,0,9,83,47,67,0.08,0.6920000000000001,0.228,0.8667,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,3,2,4,6,1,0,2,1,8,1,0,3,0,12,9,6,0,4,3,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,0,12,5,7,7,1,4,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,0,42,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004761114759769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630829131550492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20015497616344807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873638024238765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25263581237707616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16987353116454082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21889219319782197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.495876178537458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869792270017369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4382269274373309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19898546678280496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,___mirahhh,2020/01/03,Black parents/mental health I’ve been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and adhd I’ve never took medicine but I would like to get on adderal to help me in school I live with my grandmother and I was diagnosed in Maryland while I lived with my mom I moved to newyork with my grandma my grandmother said maryland doctors will diagnose you with anything and newyork doctors are better so I asked why not take me to a newyork doctor and see if they diagnose me and give me meds and her excuse was only white kids take adderal,3.532574257425744,6.128142306930697,3.8876138613861393,85.17953960396042,76.42574257425744,7.2083168316831685,30.892079207920798,8.238735603445708,2.5501556435643566,427,21,77,8,10,133,63,101,0.037000000000000005,0.843,0.12,0.8555,1,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,1,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,6,8,0,0,1,17,14,11,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,2,8,1,0,1,0,12,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,5,4,17,2,12,7,0,7,0,1,3,0,10,3,0,1,3,49,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709323333713744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880525060847536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704283765089347,0.0,0.13296547141469342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257905183033752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250214146181755,0.5774401786451667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43673405072769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430909289509932,0.1364395872903059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118340815829595,0.0,0.0,0.0953334992233651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948619565213958,0.0,0.2511826756875589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15798501629030895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657758226265645,0.0,0.15116755022898198,0.0,0.0,0.10969623157121372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081720158430626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529291476252667,0.0,0.0,0.14394394306244626,0.1133385724091304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138779089721594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802231296270985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283400867742285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103582327362468,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tozaeee,2020/01/03,"Victoria, Australia being declared State of Disaster and it's starting to really get to me I'm starting to freak out out, weather's forecast for 40°C/100°F tomorrow with strong winds and were in high danger of ember attacks from the fires that are already attacking around the outside of the town. Alot of people are fleeing my home town up to 5 hours drive away. I'm staying with my kids.. Anyone who I reads this post please don't tell us to leave because this is what were doing and theres no point telling me otherwise. My mum lives out of town and is in even worse danger. 

I guess the point of this post is my frustration with her and the frustration of my own independence. We ended up down in an evacuation centre Monday night and I wasn't prepared at all. Tomorrow is what were preparing for now. My cars packed.  

My mum just is being so blazae about the whole thing, hence why I wasn't prepared Monday. Even now she thinks she'll be okay out there and assumes the fire won't hit her house. She even thinks were better of out her place. 

I feel let down.. I don't want to be around her. It's almost like she thinks the whole thing is a joke.. but I guess it could be her way of dealing with it. People are being told they should get out if they've got somewhere to go. I can't afford to leave now, as in I don't have money for fuel. I just wish she could be more realistic about this whole thing rather then basically thinking everything will be okay. I guess I'm just venting and don't want any advice. Anyway thanks for reading",3.012151867425178,4.7724085048231535,3.7206591639871402,89.69210920108831,74.88424437299034,6.713875834776157,23.21555775414297,7.468242284971852,0.8367055651743751,1219,35,255,15,26,386,164,311,0.099,0.8390000000000001,0.062,-0.5034,1,0,0,0,0,1,28.0,2,0,1,2,18,14,6,0,11,2,37,0,0,1,1,46,60,13,0,8,6,2,3,1,0,4,0,0,1,1,15,21,0,0,6,3,1,4,9,7,0,0,8,3,33,7,47,36,7,47,0,0,0,0,21,25,0,7,14,174,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725230189422653,0.0,0.0,0.09965747612919527,0.0,0.10982562888459407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767875920602816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695884937577286,0.0,0.0,0.17719237156145698,0.0,0.2264425779303913,0.09350472898352913,0.0,0.0,0.06066803388961045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801962402968158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589213450961442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260339787740834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814745563455313,0.0,0.0,0.1972011531916469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944446711959167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05032160084195726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103992868569615,0.0,0.056560969053132834,0.0,0.07959728941473057,0.0,0.3289059877084667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10515105755807004,0.09982925056104182,0.0,0.09800968246300938,0.11483568164160388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21076005977233664,0.0,0.10176856892861837,0.0,0.04862169978347336,0.0,0.08788025113095964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09339518848896558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13799283557347888,0.0,0.10397990155577984,0.10924589390726062,0.18816199112675674,0.0,0.19063021967058646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19909900100472924,0.0,0.06375670566243996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14088517213966026,0.10607781588952167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17397422262642,0.09162700959530164,0.0,0.0,0.19835511638596695,0.2550801728396482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950980789393946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971339575258733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11740197862708085,0.07899638230798686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898036381292277,0.333340179993042,0.1144460419357581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014219995302089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,litcabtransboy,2020/01/03,"Is it possibble to have a Free Service Dog For Unemployed Residents of Ontario? If yes, how and where? As a person with physical and mental disability, I wonder if there’s really a way where I could get a free service dog. I have a balance and mental health problem. I really need a service dog to accompany me whenever I need to walk outside. My balance is really unstable that I am using my cane. I also experiencing blurred and double vision sometimes that makes me out of balance. Going outside and talking to random people especially when I have an appointment or interview makes me really nervous. Also, it makes my mood fluctuate and I can’t keep my composure. I don’t have any knowledge where I can get a free service dog here in toronto.
Happy New Year to y’all.",3.3089954337899563,5.967545424657537,5.663534246575343,71.79402283105023,77.63013698630138,8.8248401826484,30.96621004566211,9.3871,3.674605114155252,616,31,99,18,15,216,85,146,0.055999999999999994,0.812,0.132,0.8951,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,1,8,1,11,1,0,5,0,25,22,14,0,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,8,0,1,2,0,3,2,2,2,0,0,0,1,19,7,12,21,1,11,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,6,3,73,23,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799234562443767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901815382684305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973752857556068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828792278923856,0.0,0.09946668931781293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18630977801137616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18603581255633891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556392523652762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504773635745366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3527536984383861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595470672498973,0.0,0.1690333503153784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133535487322965,0.1528188541111756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674684657663641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4484837187351479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17309714951012029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14067273506595074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15115924694359306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389210395047941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18979941522265265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270577066981854
mentalhealth,SmoresnKisses,2020/01/03,"Winter weirdness - I hate feeling this way. Extreme exhaustion. I’m not depressed. I don’t feel like I am. Maybe I’m in denial, maybe I am sad. No. I am just in a weird headspace and I dislike this feeling. I don’t want to be around friends.... at least I don’t want to be around 98% of them. Even at work, I just don’t want to be there. Avoid talking to coworkers and just kinda, barely make it through the day. Not sleeping to well, food doesn’t really taste that good. Even writing this I don’t even want to finish any more. Lack of focus. Little to no motivation. Very, very tired.

I mean I sorta thought about laying across the train tracks today but I don’t want to die. My usual thing to do when sad is self harm and I don’t have any desire to cut myself. I’m not suicidal; I’m just exhausted. I have been severely depressed before but this feels different. I feel extremely exhausted and unmotivated. 

Anyone else feel like this?",0.6462566844919806,3.1342202139037454,2.2822802139037464,92.02247914438507,90.1764705882353,5.344941176470589,20.31422459893048,6.918507183188421,0.5380089411764706,728,24,151,11,25,237,102,187,0.251,0.598,0.151,-0.9709,1,1,0,0,0,2,33.0,0,0,1,2,13,18,2,1,3,0,19,7,1,2,0,36,38,7,2,7,9,0,6,2,1,0,4,0,0,1,8,6,2,1,9,0,0,0,13,13,1,0,2,7,19,5,21,33,3,15,0,4,0,0,5,8,0,2,8,94,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17056678685676036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768988912994341,0.1284978066396946,0.0,0.22328374387569253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671503966791512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087935289854528,0.0,0.21603164050758367,0.0,0.130156227382469,0.13102720790182512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476432259071808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484972202427067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3804676917452968,0.17918647359606693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15164679068605505,0.0,0.09689178771645153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10518831926965526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238168365805975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225384034942888,0.12569419813069865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371243636483337,0.0,0.2519832680257787,0.1366087244327017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034113326686096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13083043028848754,0.14167809010665286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255010006801233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137178656322369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008001537877156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331711764878129,0.0,0.0,0.09956187354783264,0.0,0.14414084154686538,0.11887442451020765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812187163749254,0.2069534788509433,0.3698516066925694,0.0995449625676752,0.0,0.0,0.11275903844666554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130028722929544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,triviassw,2020/01/03,"Death Anxiety (?) & Panic Attacks (?) [21F] So I’ve been contemplating for awhile now whether or not to actually post in this subreddit and any related, but my these panic attacks (?) have gone so far now that I just don’t feel like I can sit here and keep quiet for much longer. 

It started in 2016, I was watching a random video on YouTube when an overwhelming sense of dread over my own mortality, death and time came over me and it made me want to pull out my own hair. It would last for a couple of minutes max and I would only get it every now and then. In early 2019, I stopped getting them and I’m assuming it’s due to the fact that I moved from an isolated area and back to the city where my family was but those attacks being gone was short lived, as my mum passed away in April. My attacks weren’t too bad after she passed but in the last few months or so, they’ve escalated to the point where I have almost 3 or so a day. 

Last month (Dec 2019), I went to stay next to my old house where I lived with my mother because I was there for a house sitting job, but during this time my attacks escalated to collapsing on the ground, hyperventilating, almost screaming, crying and trying to pull at anything I could. This happened when I was awake and I somehow also woke up having a similar attack at 3am. 

Then this morning happened, again at 3am, a different type of panic attack that lasted almost an hour. While my best friend was sleeping next to me, I couldn’t bring myself to wake them knowing they have work this morning. I dug my nails into my arms like I usually do and did my best to fall asleep only to wake up this morning feeling like absolute trash and crying on my best friends shoulder. 

All of these panic attacks relate to being hyper-aware of my own mortality and the time I have left. It gets in the way of me being able to enjoy even the most simple things, like watching a TV series or a movie. I get triggered by so much, even words in the past tense can sometimes send me into a panic. 

I did see a psychologist long before, within the year it first started but it didn’t help much at all.

I know some people might say “at least you’re not suicidal” but I do have depression and I do know what it’s like to want to jump in front of a moving vehicle but please understand, the fear that I live with on the daily basis is now so incapacitating that I struggle to live a normal life. I can’t go a day without an attack anymore. 

So if anyone has any advice or can even tell me if what I’m feeling are panic attacks or something else, please, do help. I’m begging at this point because I can’t do anymore. I’m tired and I want to be able to enjoy my life.",5.235148480662981,5.1520039852670365,6.065749884898711,81.79735410911606,68.0791896869245,8.629120626151012,28.939284069981586,8.17850203761792,1.8040902854511969,2096,65,432,25,32,692,255,543,0.18899999999999997,0.69,0.122,-0.9928,3,0,1,0,0,0,55.0,0,0,3,5,27,35,10,10,29,0,40,10,7,2,3,73,72,45,5,10,20,2,4,5,2,3,3,3,0,0,27,21,0,2,8,2,0,16,9,23,0,1,17,10,54,12,65,46,15,96,0,2,3,0,13,37,0,17,43,294,81,3,0.10573188518463038,0.0,0.051589533966199495,0.0,0.0,0.051659987253783735,0.0,0.0,0.1588128151098536,0.0,0.0,0.042276875191135474,0.0,0.057280226711615985,0.0,0.07190130762638276,0.0,0.04044230138267305,0.0,0.10485761909808324,0.036965096254936936,0.0,0.04350416628323996,0.0,0.0,0.6014264167402917,0.049669293305893286,0.040650646633601,0.04414085385268589,0.06445317584067295,0.0,0.04498502338540295,0.0,0.16643863554350422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060464554677805635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04220915341906352,0.05849515995209826,0.1161415110884742,0.06818831896346518,0.0,0.04553335888953655,0.0,0.0,0.055233658066659766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04416271142629118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104752369474935,0.0,0.0445418367234332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983730572763196,0.059488883023271474,0.08019182705555583,0.07553487990212954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044967743762444015,0.0,0.0,0.0816881922143641,0.0,0.110481092172681,0.0,0.03004493347133785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349835688385552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086985390677157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05206230442024157,0.1220003996684218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052461290674110865,0.046989678819385663,0.0,0.0,0.08716121845469059,0.17237119654440855,0.0,0.0,0.05743900131021084,0.0,0.07468155736923175,0.12913814594349712,0.0,0.18672638343192596,0.0467846956000032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05002303312586478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608241075481332,0.0,0.0,0.08439418201334735,0.11237626109864668,0.11658765191600373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244705939593938,0.0,0.051797399238050296,0.0,0.0,0.0554739137418882,0.0,0.0,0.08041386314413129,0.0,0.37216075817058,0.0,0.0,0.050466524110456136,0.036650588150564885,0.0,0.0,0.1160618592435052,0.09995080706497794,0.0,0.05063095950715552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042041119432973784,0.0,0.0,0.04212731166941424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05290412174380928,0.0,0.0,0.040698785403835744,0.05228576900245158,0.0,0.07483757253270787,0.056348060765924475,0.0,0.04419829518738538,0.0,0.055266961624231566,0.0,0.05782676070630079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04620716398642563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03512178318537113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924796687866828,0.06076162411554562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03589250480857067,0.0,0.0,0.055035310656201965,0.0,0.0,0.058224366921322976,0.0,0.09354510795086962,0.041962524522701286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04900725842429078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096088213343106,0.0,0.038487035837542906,0.0,0.0,0.07510889763917578,0.0,0.0,0.034043933751438715
mentalhealth,rookiepiper,2020/01/03,"Seeking treatment for bipolar In the last six months I've begun to wonder if I'm dealing with bipolar disorder. I know very little about this at this point. But I experience periods where I'm on top of the world, confident, courageous, and blissfully content. Followed by periods of depression, dissatisfaction, in most areas of life, extreme boredom, and purposelessness. The thought has scared me, mostly because I don't know much about the issue. I was diagnosed with ADD as a child, which lead to many medications with side effects all worse than the other. I feel like at this point, it's worth my time to read into this as a possibility. If anyone can provide links to medical sites that are trusted, and any info regarding how to begin seeking teatment, that would much appreciated.",7.710992063492062,8.966480750000002,7.839523809523811,66.56325396825399,62.92857142857143,10.507936507936508,38.4126984126984,10.504223727775694,4.474674603174604,635,32,98,15,9,206,102,140,0.11800000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.126,0.0772,1,0,0,1,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,4,5,0,1,7,0,6,6,0,3,1,25,15,9,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,1,6,0,0,1,9,8,0,0,8,1,1,2,1,2,0,1,2,1,7,3,24,12,5,24,0,1,0,0,2,15,0,5,8,67,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12213205091908455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255783286027546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948060353190818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851565182495038,0.15468654715740662,0.18228707343131947,0.0,0.0,0.2058336074158674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17568023054446802,0.0,0.0,0.09080958913047504,0.12830406153821888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18745250328866386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19740351920149102,0.14639544431331455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12685460207108626,0.08774197375058683,0.18000327600969335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18208306816780198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618499652221718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14335253245306195,0.0,0.2640487729714504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33955424347204194,0.20246852028237214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17964550188209266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980782824322514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142579877757267,0.10472439690921408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14818625174742395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19476517740403215,0.0,0.0,0.1830245849104684,0.1275804851646147,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hecantevenreadit,2020/01/03,"Is this normal for fiancé to say to their S.O? Had a fight tonight with my fiancé regarding a stupid drunk fight we got in on NYE.  I apologized earlier we he seemed to have acted normal after apology.. now he is mad again.


I stopped taking Prozac 2 weeks ago because he said he didn’t like how I was on it... now he can’t stand how I am off of it. I’ve been on antidepressants for 7 years. He told me my doctor is doing a terrible job and I need help. Is this normal for someone to say to their SO??",0.4508233276157796,2.4294101886792454,2.751200686106348,92.50126072041168,83.90566037735849,6.118696397941681,19.070325900514586,7.348242739294969,0.3403509433962264,384,10,88,6,11,131,70,106,0.179,0.753,0.068,-0.905,1,0,0,0,2,0,14.0,2,0,2,0,6,6,4,0,3,0,12,3,0,2,0,12,18,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,4,1,1,1,1,0,1,2,5,0,0,7,3,12,1,16,11,0,16,0,0,0,0,19,5,0,1,10,54,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18931836006067165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019128076241146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185996087688032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17081273925863585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431525588494764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119368839231533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434030842624538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583606543439172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6277645430816663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031555235068204,0.3396814578815774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944275869015299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809585454393221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17855544223872494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057928325385595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20407684082349928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713142757418456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753312476787388
mentalhealth,Lost-Protection,2020/01/03,How to stop contemplating on sucide What has made you change your mind about suicide especially if u have no one in your life? How did u find strength?  Plz I need answers,3.4809090909090905,5.741556484848488,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727274,75.06060606060606,6.824242424242425,26.15151515151515,7.793537801064563,1.327533333333334,136,5,28,2,3,42,30,33,0.244,0.6409999999999999,0.115,-0.7205,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,0,3,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,3,0,9,5,3,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,4,1,4,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3922699700396021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33891548642371305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261915509827458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508713177873428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3744144534275837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27495242886639626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512718347653625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31001546902067795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4056081861597897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Player_Number3,2020/01/03,"What to do when you feel awful? Im not going to explain the reason(s) why because its a very long and complicated combination of things but life has been pretty shitty for the last 3 months. What do you do in the moments when it all just hits you at once out of the blue and you feel like you want to just lay down and die? Im not suicidal, I know I would never actually do it but Im temped to turn to alcohol or drugs when this happens. Is there some good way to make yourself forget or feel better when this feeling really hits you?",2.5582882882882885,4.0483122162162175,4.102882882882883,87.61396396396395,75.48648648648648,7.095495495495496,23.144144144144143,7.793537801064563,0.9544306306306304,420,12,91,6,9,140,73,111,0.111,0.7070000000000001,0.182,0.851,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,6,0,1,7,3,0,0,5,1,8,3,0,1,2,25,21,11,2,2,8,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,8,4,1,0,6,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,5,8,3,13,17,2,15,0,0,1,0,7,4,0,3,10,61,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.1622362852652909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776709826752476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101344623783502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14703485692456236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17254153659334698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19279753655233564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33624453462864395,0.11876922876750833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448386179697332,0.13944284190970996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470145680050482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5387364729395828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136680261898504,0.13551616221431778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742748493666455,0.0812214861163375,0.0,0.0,0.1471262606555985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097334866596327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13269938236715725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12822246010098756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17705111569514306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16913629643059327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106504182429785,0.17093297033327853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818508159438265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044929461120566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18083255784491067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13717388696028726,0.09805871883906414,0.1319617289696221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500150134609015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809942450085414,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,introvertedgothgirl,2020/01/03,"Removing labels For 2020 I have decided that I'm removing labels from my mental health treatment. 

So from now on I'm not ""a bit OCD""... Instead it may be that I experience / display some OCD behaviours like intrusive thoughts and disruptive checking. 

From now on ""I suffer with anxiety"" is not a thing for me. I sometimes ""have anxious thoughts but coping skills help them go away"" is a better mindset for helping me deal with this. 

Similarly, ""I am depressed"" is now a banned phrase for me... sometimes I do have dark thoughts and that's ok with me as long as I sort of wave them on out and don't get stuck in a thought spiral. 

🖤",2.6091530054644814,4.952962237704924,3.753688524590164,86.25845628415303,78.2622950819672,7.017486338797814,29.019125683060107,8.07648339933343,2.124374863387978,491,23,96,9,12,159,77,122,0.11900000000000001,0.75,0.132,0.3939,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,2,2,5,5,0,0,5,1,11,1,0,0,0,19,20,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,5,0,1,3,3,2,0,0,5,0,14,3,19,13,2,13,0,2,0,0,5,6,0,3,5,67,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14593654884753327,0.2155128769872844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17923226426138794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16871827431374986,0.2082686067489948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19667282630934485,0.16430769334561324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866071353820697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09966809969607136,0.0,0.10841751708618956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027768394102767,0.0,0.0,0.2557347515567999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931993219932699,0.0,0.0,0.1688231574692738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19224868340325504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773476988787912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267373925866731,0.0,0.0,0.6057920682128131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ummwhoknows,2020/01/03,"I know something’s wrong with me but I don’t know what? (Advice appreciated) This isn’t the shortest post, but I would like some help if some people are able to.

I’m slightly better mentally than I have been in the past, but I’m still not okay. I spent two years ignoring everything I felt and I’m still dealing with the subsequent breakdowns that occurred with finally listening to myself. I’ve struggled with S/H (though I’m a few weeks clean now); and a general feeling of detachment from my body and emotions.

I know that something is wrong with me mentally, I just don’t know what. I know I seem to think differently and I’m too empathetic, but it’s more than that. My brain and thoughts just seem... wrong, for lack of a better excuse. I know there’s something wrong.

I do really weird things. I’ll decide to sit on the bathroom floor and write in my diary but then I’ll realise what I’m doing is wrong. I needn’t be doing that, and I’m annoyed with myself. 

It’s really hard to explain, but I was just wondering if this is normal? The way I think and my emotions in response to situations seems stupid and wrong. I get far too angry over the smallest things (like the movie Elf. Stupid I know, but it infuriates me lmao), and I get too defensive.

Tl;dr- My thoughts and actions feel wrong and stupid and I don’t know if it’s normal",1.7319209984559976,4.144015720149259,3.1604065877509018,88.86395522388064,82.09701492537313,6.383118888317036,23.04734945959856,7.6298220110432995,1.1248974266598046,1055,37,216,18,29,344,126,268,0.24,0.675,0.086,-0.9939,1,0,3,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,2,11,20,5,1,10,1,16,2,2,0,0,65,47,25,0,8,14,0,4,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,15,19,0,2,21,0,1,1,6,15,0,1,6,5,29,5,23,39,5,19,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,9,10,136,44,0,0.08430339984283942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238030663553886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911901263574062,0.0,0.09364207238432272,0.0,0.09411047503288336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691310348810251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807910977176378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896599557915768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576645986414203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852526639885679,0.0,0.08094448438764497,0.09235025381020098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880900938467428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551928738391389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05650679187525419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3706475506340063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082372765668006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699159973406518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16519886507875492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047713427851624,0.05844536266305874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807393534373264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801383330249807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23023994700796435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476055359734158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19470262767146232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464960802726514,0.0,0.0,0.08813221774624587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201486574837932,0.10803642919440223,0.08282766231384964,0.13385496538814465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235217188335353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691611479498105,0.06762310225123709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142344098728836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598867164656473,0.6452077349110712,0.0,0.05428862550325305
mentalhealth,secret2327kla,2020/01/03,"college winter break blues Hi everyone,

I’ve just been feeling pretty sad today. Maybe it’s lonely being home for break with my parents, they moved somewhere kind of rural I have never lived before until this break. I’ve only been here a week and a half and I just have two more days until I go back to my apt, I hope I will feel a little better then. 

I flunked all three of my classes last quarter while I was doing an intensive outpatient therapy program. I was supposed to graduate this June, which would have been remarkable given how my depression and anxiety have affected me all these years of college. But with this comes some regret that I have made it into such a prestigious university and that I haven’t really taken advantage of the resources here or felt like I have tried my best. I’m watching my acquaintances get grad school acceptances to great schools. I know
that I’m not helping myself through self-comparison, but these thoughts come my way every now and then. In a way I feel like I’m trying my best now but that I am doing my worst.

Anyways I feel sad :( but I’m sure I’m not alone, and my empathy goes out for anyone in a similar boat.",5.3086490455212925,6.177932229074893,5.958696035242291,79.29581204111602,68.11894273127754,9.225139500734212,30.111306901615272,9.3871,2.6401832011747426,924,34,173,18,15,301,138,227,0.11900000000000001,0.736,0.145,0.6358,1,3,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,4,10,18,0,0,8,0,18,0,0,3,4,40,38,17,0,3,9,1,5,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,12,12,0,0,8,0,0,4,4,7,0,4,10,7,28,11,18,25,7,30,0,6,2,0,4,5,0,3,18,122,40,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14412309640056686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645355113456688,0.0,0.0,0.09730073783721517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700196433225903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841105287097685,0.0,0.2920701541676523,0.12307170194053985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397402257771413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974376397218788,0.0,0.11985439955582187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11724448241456935,0.13296901180128162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814447404548673,0.0994126932097607,0.13361107051615834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270298791679408,0.0,0.07908525856038523,0.0,0.0,0.15341939329052948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327297605269398,0.0,0.1395842791358996,0.13821277696303153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449090047401778,0.07647620526439555,0.11343027818718715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596866402374458,0.1394703350787779,0.12287682653588793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316722672229493,0.0,0.0,0.13980037005867774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790023871269528,0.0,0.0,0.10732527457572777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583400300519746,0.0,0.0,0.1545156778229134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157113691968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914655524264146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816655228973977,0.0,0.0,0.14516950043996935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115238052045994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15913640368214868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047389673744802,0.0,0.0,0.13190311140293035,0.0,0.0,0.18895485495906367,0.0,0.1359346708785141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22091026461351426,0.11162212165243617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09885205097302592,0.0,0.0,0.08961155815883619
mentalhealth,xifarofgnikool,2020/01/03,"Hi, looking for help (I know it's very long, but hey, it's only like what, 2-3 minutes of reading? Please, wait for a moment and try to give me some response, I would be very grateful for responding, thank you)

Hi,

 I think i need someone to straighten me up. Since 12-14 years old (I am 17 now), i have been in constant fight with my thoughts and feelings. Something is always wrong in my head. I have tried meditation, not masturbating, not playing games, not watching tv or anything like that ( you know, whenever I was bored i didn't immediately turn on pc or something like that, instead I was drawing, reading..).

 I have a loved one, i talk with her about any topic possible, It is helping a lot (talking with her and other people about my frustrating problems), but I'm still, all the time, worried about something. I had even stages of working out, running every day. Lately I am learning so much and working so much on school that I barely have any time. I thought it would make me happy, and yeah, it makes me happy a little bit (high grades, bright and clear future), but I still have something on my mind, and I don't know what it is. 

Currently the passage of time is killing me, but I am sure that I will just talk with people, think about it a lot, and in the end I will just stop thinking about time (like really, now, every good moment i have, it passes so fast I can't even see it). In a few months my head will have another main problem that will kill 50% of my will to live, will to achieve great things, learn great skills.. I tried to relax and not give a fuck, it doesn't work either. Talking, working, running, meditating. I tried not to think all the time, remove the negative stuff from my head, but i just can't. I am eating good food, sleeping well, drinking plenty of water. 

What can I do? Should i worry about fixing my ""problem"", or it's just normal thing for humans? (I would love to have clear mind actually, It would help me to not get frustrated so easily, get much more work done in less time..)

If you gave me your precious time, and actually did read all of it, thank you, please give me a possible solution, opinion, or just say something in comment below. Thank you very much.

And also, sorry for my english, I think i have made a lot of grammar mistakes above, but I'm not using english daily, so I'm sorry for that.",5.589444846147663,5.539312917570501,5.940472402988672,82.8831228408452,67.32971800433839,8.391451755443077,30.956937414638066,7.793537801064563,1.9397851851851848,1809,64,366,18,27,581,214,461,0.095,0.675,0.23,0.9974,1,0,6,0,1,0,98.0,0,6,0,7,25,33,6,0,14,1,42,11,4,4,6,83,77,28,2,12,24,0,1,4,0,11,0,1,0,1,26,16,4,2,13,8,0,4,13,12,1,1,11,6,57,21,44,54,17,44,0,0,4,3,30,14,1,10,29,249,83,14,0.0,0.0,0.1219532123029811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04996944476247027,0.051992747024630144,0.0,0.0,0.08498424738210693,0.06552124974587495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051420049949280434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821772709050486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675243744074529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04029782738773725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394412168943765,0.0,0.06121177243481375,0.0,0.06393802673220042,0.0,0.0,0.05534339919667823,0.0,0.0,0.08254185795505818,0.0,0.1052930633925968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03159442803611287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755574318533016,0.0,0.0,0.057766621678759185,0.06529194515513452,0.17982468302211008,0.0,0.10481935330150262,0.0,0.13778045303892344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303345544461967,0.0,0.0,0.1923837301996996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564767029640705,0.06601911436350064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13826137805858546,0.0,0.10302080443056244,0.0,0.07048610188046353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210857914691765,0.06262665214773304,0.055175634790966585,0.0552974942434613,0.0524718862470848,0.0,0.0,0.15936821635181062,0.11279078457071835,0.05912506965884357,0.08341880071836404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618461252282104,0.0,0.049875143294342415,0.0,0.18373544105973108,0.04633203310008587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06122229394588938,0.0,0.0,0.06556777566816363,0.0,0.042341633472621855,0.04752286059874226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663883183522067,0.0,0.0,0.13718011651234738,0.0,0.14088549799402014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793698826495412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18750652664236314,0.0,0.040029661520466865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049690791615054936,0.0,0.06323842526993673,0.04979266712449818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05168845786174202,0.0,0.0625303922589478,0.0,0.05294356323402063,0.2405210531693959,0.0,0.13989427941501187,0.0,0.0,0.09980162852104436,0.05224048040391823,0.0,0.0,0.07153068026939509,0.0,0.0,0.05889162386082032,0.0,0.0,0.2008931601166553,0.0,0.17258411372373886,0.0,0.0,0.08302486865012428,0.200190177512744,0.0,0.09921264329755652,0.2550496282847045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16969357629294549,0.0679660264720989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396720762043115,0.0,0.1546706656732607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056181758444962614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274500897548078,0.1269136417586018,0.0,0.1775509611239092,0.06831782943035836,0.0,0.04023846273876005
mentalhealth,fuocofiori,2020/01/03,"Went to the Hospital again, feeling like I'll never have friends For context I'm 23F. So I went back to the hospital for the 3rd time last week. I was having suicidal ideation and thoughts of self harm. What basically got me in there was I thought the world was going to end because of climate change and I have nothing and no one. I've been isolating myself recently and haven't been going out with friends. I feel like I'm totally stuck. I have no boyfriend, and I feel like my friend group is pushing me out. I live with my parents and I just quit my nannying job. Its hard to have hope with all this. Does anyone feel like there is hope at all? I feel scared and alone.",1.2097794117647034,3.675698948529412,2.127941176470589,94.94573529411768,85.25,5.752941176470588,23.94117647058824,7.1686216300943375,0.9220823529411768,531,21,115,8,16,166,80,136,0.146,0.691,0.163,0.1469,2,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,7,11,0,1,4,0,13,0,0,0,4,26,30,8,1,2,1,1,6,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,12,0,0,7,0,0,5,4,2,0,1,11,6,16,9,15,19,3,18,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,2,12,71,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414733204314606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551181459495584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503467913775592,0.0,0.08326827743791226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445015383276361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953697543147855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098441832777122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3453377958194849,0.3903397624022641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31660356362524383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15526247222196496,0.0,0.10924911775370116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236410231364148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713433304078812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13555146816663713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134480519350354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669376228304955,0.0,0.12061767397639887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535204515899307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310685277126471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256167801561982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516748289918047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452877481335465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487308112988494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675744967282416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14250048580373184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941497268438536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21688555662182687,0.07965082265748533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956989253051094,0.0,0.0,0.2532536178532364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CleverThrow-AwayName,2020/01/03,"I’m so scared. I’ve been depressed for 8 years. 8. Long. Years. To be perfectly honest, I’m exhausted. I’ve tried everything from meditation, exercise, breathing exercises, medication, EVERYTHING. Nothing seems to help. I’m tired and stressed out all the damn time. I’ve contemplated suicide so many times, I can’t even count. This isn’t what scares me so much though..

A few months ago, after hearing about the post-trip healing effects of psychedelics, I decided to try acid. It started out quite pleasantly, and I began to understand why people do it. It was like seeing color for the first time. But this quickly changed once I sat in my living room and let my mind wander a bit too much. Panic set in. Hard. It was like a two hour long panic attack and I’ve never been so scared to lose control. See, I began seeing “alternate” versions of myself. They were so aggressive and violent, it even scared me. 

In one of these alternates, I was freaking out (like I was in real life) with one main difference: I was brutally attacking my wife. I lost touch on which was the real me, and for a while I honestly thought I had murdered her. Scariest night of my life.

Ever since then, I cannot get that scenario out of my head. It flashes like post traumatic stress depictions on TV. 

I can’t even drink anymore because after a couple of beers, I start to think I might lose control and do something horrible if I get too drunk. More panic ensues.

I’ve also had reoccurring nightmares that this happens and I wake up and frantically shake my wife to make sure she’s okay. 

I am so terrified I might do something crazy without even realizing it. Please. If anybody has any insight whatsoever, please help me.  Even writing this feels wrong. Like I’m somehow giving it power.",3.015791505791505,5.668258438438443,4.066517374517376,82.85367567567567,78.72972972972974,7.16907764907765,27.532303732303728,8.238735603445708,2.2051579407979416,1392,60,252,28,35,450,193,333,0.271,0.638,0.091,-0.9966,1,0,4,0,0,1,54.0,0,0,1,10,19,36,7,11,9,1,24,14,3,4,5,42,48,22,2,2,4,2,3,5,0,2,8,1,1,0,17,14,3,2,9,6,0,1,6,25,0,4,16,9,33,11,33,28,8,38,0,4,4,0,10,12,1,6,28,159,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069880833833732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378077811317906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054236758594770916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909643873790133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146773934493646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04861846681428378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870728049036221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437118506544761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890608568730246,0.0,0.0882484053216397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869365455586503,0.0,0.0,0.08332795821833806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781304353918193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26339015533924315,0.07214379315576341,0.0,0.0,0.14335895124895034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04032698809768604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784034236674394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333834979181436,0.07650914314821487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052789411936493,0.0,0.0714456360891013,0.0,0.08185258055717856,0.0,0.0898907150880737,0.0,0.10691742013820804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854351276615781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155582889328661,0.11266792586204127,0.19482356241164545,0.0,0.0704259360211965,0.1411629537739393,0.0,0.1784529409880638,0.08706300499323709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053237693998568016,0.08085998178279279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034569575959878,0.0,0.1692168487019556,0.08053074044420963,0.0,0.06366041213667081,0.0,0.11725955184676412,0.0,0.061512680086346375,0.0,0.0,0.07484552541173027,0.0,0.07652795351441988,0.0,0.0,0.08493744879101844,0.1080893470921707,0.0,0.0,0.2807291531362673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055292710730873336,0.0,0.0,0.1750960935108366,0.0,0.0,0.15276824407591738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483023521676389,0.0,0.18155938897074475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193983463141515,0.0,0.19066541975564708,0.07260679153163757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597491882415701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280000305520312,0.0,0.0,0.1129032972909601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827202672086999,0.0,0.0,0.08724002843014789,0.0,0.07516900802173522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05110437129358667,0.07835978363650152,0.06331728937816812,0.1395189499743462,0.09166769417060884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829806482961936,0.0,0.07790994204718177,0.08302872247495498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196730996973211,0.0,0.0,0.07688185801598127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720057508712435,0.0,0.10272039146145616
mentalhealth,VegetableConsumer69,2020/01/04,"Can someone explain my problem So some background info I’m only 14 but anyway. Recently I’ve been have thoughts of just not wanting to live because I find life, friends, family and school too stressful and I couldn’t kill myself because I couldn’t put anyone through that but recently I just haven’t been as happy as I used to be and I’m just constantly worried about school and sometimes I wish I had no friends because I find that I struggle to help or please them. I couldn’t really think properly while writing this and it’s probably grammatically incorrect a lot and also it’s my first time venting ever, but I just want to know if there is anything I can do to make myself happier without hurting myself or people around me.",3.277484909456738,5.7953218591549325,4.320643863179075,82.15126760563383,76.88732394366197,6.874044265593561,30.56539235412475,7.957251820313856,2.4374350100603617,592,29,104,10,14,192,91,142,0.135,0.6609999999999999,0.204,0.8987,0,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,1,1,12,8,1,2,1,0,13,1,0,2,1,39,24,17,1,8,12,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,7,0,0,1,7,5,0,1,4,0,19,3,12,16,2,9,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,5,7,78,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710567011994265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239220255545828,0.0,0.12050522945642045,0.13036003669922605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26780003183973905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15824644744409133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246071139973278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804783484637778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26768165386243226,0.12455929496385855,0.0,0.0,0.2262738304782658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588498153489952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815367970709307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15676390963826148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16201091893478306,0.0,0.08047798273848024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343283156318267,0.0,0.0,0.1293066136156511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449555830510005,0.0,0.0,0.09774787978095442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137198868001214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152102458513457,0.0,0.0,0.16074392608996527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15788392650452912,0.14012049701478138,0.0,0.14720969921103433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381133529323238,0.0,0.2891778760752236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29640426079450216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407565224166887,0.0,0.14483000432473936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16774316627181746,0.1530878180385442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383096010171163,0.0,0.11625467456121508,0.085388631781736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647460949254374,0.0,0.0,0.1727447531462135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839540094593805,0.1411601076275896,0.0,0.0,0.14871395045663774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LucilleB666,2020/01/04,"Its getting hard (vent) I dont know where to post this so i hope this is okay.

I dont know how to help myself. Im already taking anti depressants and eating 2 meals a day and working part time, all the things i thought would help me get better from where i was a 2 years ago. For a while it did help but now I am starting to watch myself slip back into a bad state.

I dont want to kill myself but I really dont want to be alive.

Stress is piling up and I am trouble finding the will to pull myself up.

I know i have so many amazing things and people in my life to live for but its hard to fight the apathy.

I just need to let it out, shout to the void that im not okay. That I am not handelling things.

I dont think I need advice, im not sure id be able to take it but i just need to let this out.",-0.2907950872656748,1.1427418791208799,2.0710084033613434,99.28281512605041,83.50549450549453,4.94169360051713,16.20038784744667,5.5289334501034215,-0.9101413057530708,610,10,159,3,17,208,96,182,0.159,0.6920000000000001,0.149,0.0609,0,0,0,0,1,1,15.0,0,0,0,2,9,12,2,1,8,2,19,3,0,1,2,32,35,12,1,7,9,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,13,7,2,0,6,0,0,1,8,6,0,0,3,4,22,6,21,26,2,19,0,1,1,0,4,8,0,1,8,106,35,1,0.10272860084584083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038519981040904,0.09106270636074526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133635655418693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07899195299235158,0.08577409072975313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908550992969475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662514490204602,0.0,0.0884799933788293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6019857755431439,0.0,0.0,0.1051170048886115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389208008757642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734290795062562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840492968086003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20657044716299336,0.0,0.0,0.10203267995066782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33289355168975865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113653976327448,0.0,0.1693708573195974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100939088810447,0.07256024882307492,0.0,0.0,0.09071123662209203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415067736620974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285158675734483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11124506388697336,0.0,0.07121907708937716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983856028022204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581057221800762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271183241989294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767526518519862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682049055415183,0.0,0.15447824620790715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047449531166761,0.06582433942291575,0.0,0.08155503417553159,0.059901873274734126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118398077029513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478764490750317,0.0,0.0,0.07297545061333692,0.0,0.0,0.06615385085524182
mentalhealth,yaasianboi,2020/01/04,"Is it bad that Is it bad that I’ve basically “pushed” all negative emotions to one side of my brain (if this makes sense, the left side specifically in relation to the eyes facing forward) and now whenever I feel any intense negative emotion of sorts I get a headache, but only in that left area. When there’s nothing emotionally intensive sometimes it’s a mild pressure, and 100% I feel desensitized to everything",5.540570175438598,7.626389460526319,6.2736842105263175,72.64412280701757,68.86842105263158,10.329824561403509,36.35087719298246,10.504223727775694,4.4082614035087735,333,18,57,10,6,109,55,76,0.16,0.825,0.015,-0.8705,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,4,0,2,3,3,1,1,9,6,5,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,0,3,4,0,7,6,1,11,0,0,1,0,0,8,0,2,3,35,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331291232980877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269166233010677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21854211164242374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.660638795281034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17594388004730524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197972618932097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022808306796867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4254055532497847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067682715693385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18784491594145128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265763284045834,0.1488905759130097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19361980520389305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nursenavy,2020/01/04,"I hate myself My husband's birthday is on the 31st of December. We celebrated a little with our girls, had cake, played some games etc. Afterwards, my husband and I did some bedroom stuff. During the middle of it, I started thinking about how much weight I had gained. Also troubles I'm having at work. And about how my friends aren't really there for me. I realized then how much I hated myself. I started crying in the middle of having sex with my husband because I hate myself so much. I felt terrible because it was the worst timing. My husband tried to console me after, but I've been struggling the last four days now.",3.9595,5.938975950000002,4.9216666666666695,81.15000000000002,72.83333333333334,6.8000000000000025,28.66666666666667,7.554174236665415,1.9170666666666665,494,20,86,6,10,161,79,120,0.163,0.773,0.065,-0.8975,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,2,0,0,2,9,9,3,1,6,0,9,2,0,3,0,14,17,9,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,5,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,7,0,1,6,2,21,2,13,11,7,15,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,2,9,71,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635019118667145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231180654725512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20102399096032394,0.11802401989129647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20410056626053732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17571489033136045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14139032856870734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5420429414833516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14917468152092142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834205394670629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4035923911304093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723861740921332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590658131328657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19131807550688296,0.20949860025263006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172631430745376,0.0,0.0,0.1067125321397843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124249366045962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22285255271816587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323087450450238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uhanotherdistraction,2020/01/04,Thoughts are just too much to handle right now I don’t know how to clear out my head. It feels like I just have too much to handle in my brain that it’s affecting my everyday life. I can’t focus on anything and I constantly have terrible and I mean TERRIBLE thoughts about everything even if it’s unintentional and it makes me disgusted because I can’t stop. These thoughts make me want to do bad things and I can’t shove them away although I know I wouldn’t act up on everything that comes in my head. I just need to know how to make it stop or just keep it more lowkey. It’s all ruining me and I want to just feel normal.,1.0458996728462395,3.2549542061068704,2.471499454743729,94.00925572519085,83.27480916030535,6.79629225736096,21.570883315158127,7.957251820313856,0.905086804798255,495,16,114,10,14,160,69,131,0.157,0.7829999999999999,0.06,-0.9265,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,12,6,1,0,0,0,9,4,3,6,2,39,26,10,0,6,7,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,11,7,0,3,9,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,3,2,19,1,15,22,4,15,0,1,0,0,1,8,0,2,6,77,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311972960658996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497897221339872,0.0,0.13311738084596944,0.09718704109971618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779765936196851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373348180353903,0.0,0.1722871788249445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530200366044903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865707867807676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122518485202933,0.11389681550614718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32724232712296114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170869897772334,0.0,0.0,0.26285565636664243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261011565009885,0.07788943916977213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.319262265578448,0.0,0.0,0.1736659957750633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343987713186724,0.1182153162037543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15620753835469162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615233890831327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26658121806330914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591820003935268,0.0,0.0,0.37970880665311857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18807187559068214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arson_is_cool,2020/01/04,"Anyone have any tips on starting a new school while suffering from anxiety? I’ve recently moved to my dads and I’m starting a new school, I already have friends there however they’re in the year above me and I won’t see them much (not to mention they’re doing their GCSEs this year). I’ve suffered from anxiety for quite a long time (diagnosed) and I find it difficult to socialise and make new friends. If anyone has any tips I would be very grateful.",4.031749598715892,5.721839269662926,4.4831781701444635,85.5659550561798,72.03370786516854,8.231781701444623,30.69181380417336,8.841846274778883,2.4957723916532903,361,16,71,7,7,114,61,89,0.136,0.758,0.106,-0.1796,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,1,1,5,0,0,4,0,7,1,0,1,0,9,12,6,0,2,2,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,1,8,2,8,9,1,14,0,2,1,0,6,2,0,1,11,38,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18669664624723795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300992490417195,0.0,0.25884767565082234,0.0,0.0,0.2365921057573337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17171626281109612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15462936771385655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614193302543479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972082816830615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293036058172914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798137901975153,0.12436830445795816,0.0,0.0,0.4901913580405704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17994598059637454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670469062378405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34244261997799397,0.13481622378341634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23949591194309136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986514387657421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395929446398141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018210456567728,0.0,0.0,0.21789544166114036
mentalhealth,0192837465704,2020/01/04,"Not sure if it would be appropriate to go to the ER. I don't know of any other options. Explaining everything would be a long story, but basically I'm in a situation now where I have lost my job and I have no insurance or money at all. Mentally I've fallen apart and I can't function. I have an extremely hard time leaving the house at all or speaking to people on the phone. I'm constantly in a state of intense anxiety and fear. I obviously need to find a new job but I don't think that's possible in my current mental state. I'll likely end up homeless or worse if I don't do something.

I have been to the hospital before and I have ended up committed twice. That hasn't helped me at all and any meds I've ever tried hasn't worked for me, I'm not currently on anything. I'm not sure what to do, if I go to an ER I'll likely end up committed again and I don't want that but I also don't understand how else I can get help. Especially with no money or insurance. I also feel like an ER isn't appropriate for my issues but it's the only way I can think of to see a doctor.",1.158520335172696,2.8059836094420625,4.183494788473328,84.83084406294708,79.85836909871243,7.871571632945024,23.54159002656857,8.704169506293173,1.6309392601675858,843,29,187,20,21,305,116,233,0.134,0.804,0.062,-0.9331,4,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,7,7,0,1,13,0,23,1,0,1,9,43,40,20,0,7,14,0,2,3,0,2,1,1,0,0,7,7,0,0,7,0,2,3,14,2,3,1,2,4,21,5,25,34,3,31,0,1,1,0,5,13,0,8,15,122,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061778710964169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17532585448231666,0.0,0.09861546724564407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608159126651416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969254835997967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393054478454222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194440597225846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076874033682995,0.0,0.3425268465514417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116606085138071,0.0,0.0,0.11585560824718175,0.0,0.0,0.1450591038267375,0.06518055125446495,0.09209302166571927,0.0,0.0,0.1178210104352701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06734992912078616,0.0,0.1465245572750558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547765317193945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17281073325963334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14874433459678568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13454809800790252,0.2558457118047938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084532770342926,0.0,0.0,0.13649662022408118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18893611143865752,0.0,0.0,0.11408091178797798,0.0,0.0,0.14072002217430785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318947028890835,0.0,0.2598210508729917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558481181402848,0.0,0.12450166477615315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804153591495793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893696637363997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453261697365396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272423630822496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448997563637718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992408839683145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429914859120925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16520009301760707,0.0,0.0,0.0751682061960041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752113532861899,0.0,0.0,0.1341994072992047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760342035750348,0.1023224154198584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384770134879704,0.0,0.1313698635993548,0.18314731807438528,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NT_Blink,2020/01/04,"I feel useless First of all, I don’t know if this is the right subreddit but I’m trying anyway.
Im a 16 years old guy who feels useless. That’s the only thing that comes on my mind right now. I am not doing anything with my life. I don’t have any skills : I can’t cook, I can’t draw, I can’t play any instrument, I’m not doing any sport. I don’t have any talent, I bring nothing to the society and the world. I hate myself. I also don’t like my body, I’m too skinny. To add to that, Im still in love with one of my male friend even though he explained to me that he can’t love me the way I love him. That’s the first time I fell in love and I can’t help but thinking of him at any moment.
I don’t have any passion, nothing motivates me...
I attempted suicide back in October. 
My mother is good at everything, she’s this kind of person who is very creative (she is an artist, she can sing very well,...) she can do everything. But I feel sad for her because it’s probably not the life she wanted, she could have been very successful but now she is stuck with two kids and a husband who isn’t helping. I mean that he doesn’t make her particularly happy, he doesn’t have any skills, he is « normal »( even if normality doesn’t exist). And I feel like Im like him, I can’t do anything productive in my life.
All of my classmates have passions, a reason to live and I feel like I have not. 
I shouldn’t have been born. 
I don’t have depression but don’t feel particularly well either.
I can’t think of anything more to say. 
Sorry if this post is a little messy.",1.2702081391736542,2.793521012012014,3.239627213420317,92.28810810810812,79.12012012012012,6.394905250077664,21.092368230299265,7.237678284180719,0.40353585999792907,1199,32,281,15,29,405,143,333,0.091,0.6779999999999999,0.231,0.9954,0,0,0,0,0,1,47.0,0,0,0,7,12,24,1,0,12,0,45,12,2,3,2,45,69,15,1,8,13,2,6,4,1,1,3,1,0,4,14,10,2,0,13,5,0,3,23,5,2,4,3,7,48,19,23,64,4,27,0,4,0,6,35,11,0,3,15,179,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949077110132286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4136462429274919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21452423203995932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681772878352739,0.0,0.05297104940760432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652196572844647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485328650013044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937945638990316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484347425778103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478809469863913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619320367789666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636236416679608,0.12415716690777068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14782753808607627,0.0,0.0,0.06713570292488757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288431682488962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604079004559212,0.0,0.09250250273006123,0.0,0.0857918978861295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648923373722472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28158806318847635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048890492285104,0.04775581806968001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841318327752292,0.16981215947748982,0.08709270975347824,0.07673083873265155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31370845244328605,0.0,0.0580038142691195,0.0,0.0,0.0946553155495599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774027875449013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702794351674275,0.16675828228644235,0.0,0.09118282807099176,0.0,0.05888303889884205,0.06608839148894352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587431331038724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322243311137192,0.0,0.09368868122326657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934365217295967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484175706897658,0.0,0.06910325784845907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727305751968607,0.0,0.0,0.0693953290462007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950502177278962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05772990044724649,0.11135901043847073,0.08537496639772336,0.0,0.05066980838521559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05899674052609481,0.0,0.08488485260733024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21509512213876467,0.05125356478274309,0.06897407088999108,0.0,0.0,0.15626003989945902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05595823241462913
mentalhealth,Dwwss,2020/01/04,"How can I avoid self harm Do you have tips for when one wants to harm themselves so bad ? I'm used to bite my fingers and hands in general, but it really is an issue to me.
I don't really want to discuss what my situation is but i'd like to just have your personal solutions maybe, just to know what could work.",1.4113636363636353,3.1579855909090924,3.5393939393939418,89.27909090909094,79.45454545454545,8.036363636363637,21.60606060606061,8.841846274778883,1.3243515151515153,243,7,56,6,6,83,49,66,0.146,0.777,0.076,-0.4319,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,1,5,5,0,1,1,0,8,2,2,2,0,13,13,6,0,3,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,2,7,1,8,12,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,36,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424857905893414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318740813462001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031195531751378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15960540799876932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418829165328674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917625818965973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967938531373181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25358063628731703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720967135332163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30296792664588235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3264405075543553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508267598498167,0.0,0.0,0.3425905554211304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21142679622041427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pearls2001,2020/01/04,I can’t stand the thought of doing homework I have to do homework for college. I’ve left it until two days before it’s due because I can’t stand the thought of doing it. It’s simple enough and wouldn’t take much effort. Yet the thought of doing it makes me so angry that I self harmed to cope with the rage. Otherwise I’d have broken something or punched a wall. I really don’t know what to do. I’ve talked to teachers about it but nothing has worked for me. I don’t know what’s wrong with me,2.5686792452830183,3.6550780849056608,3.603915094339623,92.82398584905664,74.75471698113208,6.054716981132076,24.57075471698113,5.985473137389443,0.4590792452830184,391,12,88,2,8,126,61,106,0.13699999999999998,0.863,0.0,-0.9036,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,1,0,5,0,13,0,0,1,0,12,20,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,9,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,3,0,9,0,13,16,2,8,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,57,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161524972878045,0.0,0.1976804164476483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14982203270274158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400404151687247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553452188534168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25240768693306725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550700757263826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707760631499976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229096464430894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882502720789526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24235209979712996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17884514093982515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746697256997026,0.18672359997944712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5532893775748012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269350850061148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691259156857477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539967223694588,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Smothi,2020/01/04,"Hey y'all just chillin here hatin myself, how are you?",-0.2681818181818194,1.804562636363638,0.5004545454545449,101.2706818181818,104.45454545454544,2.2,14.590909090909092,3.1291,-1.451763636363636,43,1,9,0,2,13,11,11,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TisAPrankBro,2020/01/04,"I have advice that may help. 1) Get offline for a bit. 
2) Meditate
3) Exercise (it doesn't have to be alot anything will help)
4) Take your medicine as prescribed
5) Practice mindfulness
6) Pick up a healthy hobby
7) Make lists. I personally give myself a list of accomplishments I want to have done each week. 

For example I have these goals for this week:

- Walk 20 laps around the block. (roughly 5 miles)
- Meditate for 10 minutes per day.
- Practice guitar for 3.5 hours total.
- Draw or write about your day before bed.
- Finish reading the books I started.
- Give thanks to (real) loved ones.
- Make a song as simple as you want that's a minimum of 30s long. 

Making objectives to do each week provides a certain level of satisfaction that I cannot describe. 

May your year be filled with exponential progress.",1.9691626717801216,4.811367463087251,2.857679769894535,87.21185682326626,89.13422818791945,5.791115372323426,24.544902524768297,7.2636822038024595,1.479243272611058,628,26,115,11,21,198,107,149,0.03,0.8190000000000001,0.152,0.9451,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,4,0,3,2,3,0,0,9,0,13,2,0,4,2,20,25,4,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,1,1,1,6,4,0,1,0,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,2,11,3,19,19,5,16,0,0,0,1,11,4,0,4,10,63,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16901318257728534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14233022479817348,0.1539698601612051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717506478137365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18882604045677087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230880303162716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769967400567798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036375149972367,0.3318353778865512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318610629679051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703294218627206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15306295490204386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561019265728791,0.0,0.3463537084371776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17463892279527887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720125158230173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15102081429937805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730054464128068,0.1968647993196227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242101655943564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004337332528074,0.0,0.0,0.1592370792270239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20403097574198745,0.0,0.4162109681551082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137969435637997
mentalhealth,HRPrO3_02,2020/01/04,"I deserve the universe My friends say that “I deserve the universe/ the world/ everything, etc.” Then how come I feel empty? How come I feel so alone? How come I’m not happy? How come nothing is working for me? How come I feel like I don’t have anything?",0.4063865546218501,2.850562411764706,1.5965266106442575,96.59294117647059,91.54901960784315,3.698599439775911,24.932773109243694,5.288315135182226,0.3825831932773109,197,9,41,1,7,62,32,51,0.161,0.731,0.10800000000000001,-0.4165,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,5,0,14,12,7,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,3,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,4,8,3,1,12,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,25,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916142222034808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15224719462852665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7968472444815087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20633468723440326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16627476197354954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28063934432982995,0.1321709452702727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293801216579208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19694623403867265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903863796006181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17752176817806067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14712711539030113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13468924327118695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Iamnotelton,2020/01/04,I don't know what's normal amount of bad mood So i a most of the time in a normal mood but like every month there is just this one week when i feel so awful and sad and i really think about killing myself. I don't have depression because the low mood doesn't last that long. So i am just wondering if anybody else have it like this and is it normal.,1.9460964912280687,3.139134750000004,3.3236842105263165,93.79412280701756,76.5,6.64561403508772,19.24561403508772,7.1686216300943375,0.06326140350877152,275,5,65,3,6,90,51,76,0.242,0.638,0.12,-0.9143,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,8,10,1,0,4,1,8,0,0,0,0,15,12,9,1,4,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,0,1,7,2,4,12,2,8,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,3,8,43,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861495359319994,0.13590503722612934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19202196801629515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18624171306107812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18784054933095634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272755349462238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466553101313393,0.0,0.12252459230291192,0.1817297098050624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21783906599294814,0.0,0.0,0.1972990691055816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779523553121003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6553154949942722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510731179206343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282410193538767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285397994147234,0.0,0.0,0.13000086409171646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788328134243609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24177404792744056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheCuntHunter6969,2020/01/04,"Extremely afraid I'll do something horrible? First off, I
 want to clarify that I'm not trying to be edy or cool. I'm a mellow soft person who cries watching movies and loves animals. But every once in a while, I just get into a terrifying rage.



Usually, I'll feel like shit. But sometimes, I get this warm feeling saying everything's gonna be ok. That I am not worthless. Then, it all comes crashing down. Then the rage sets in. The anger lasts only a few minutes. It's almost like the rage fuels me. It's like I'm living in the moment, not afraid of what'll happen or what has happened. It's almost a high, like I'm intoxicated on rage. For now, I have only damaged property (thankfully, only mine) but I'm afraid it'll spiral out of control. And the worst part is that I sometimes even think about truly horrific things. I manage to have clairvoyance enough to never even come close to doing them, but just thinking about it is a step closer to doing it.


I'm tired of constantly being afraid. And I can't even go to a psychologist as my (Asian) parents and country don't care.",2.544023255813954,4.665465297674423,4.189476744186049,84.17305232558142,77.41860465116278,6.904651162790699,23.77325581395349,7.908726449838941,1.3771906976744193,849,28,164,14,20,284,126,215,0.187,0.7120000000000001,0.1,-0.9755,1,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,2,8,23,6,4,12,2,15,4,1,1,2,30,37,14,0,1,11,1,4,4,0,2,2,1,0,1,14,9,0,1,4,0,0,4,6,13,0,1,0,7,12,10,22,32,5,26,0,2,1,1,6,11,1,4,14,103,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707256149776622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378245755484377,0.0,0.0,0.23289045089864885,0.0,0.14608108611706086,0.1516153764629303,0.0,0.0,0.1484884043777237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13967662620278928,0.0,0.26785448290352903,0.0,0.11389461358182824,0.0,0.12149067640398947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13670169929788414,0.09657230809564764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498366875328678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125148654327835,0.0,0.07682566188406617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390776854116624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282463207303953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101893874794706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641676286900038,0.0,0.11936603231340807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220048349849457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10425881392135468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439618247169007,0.0,0.3084304513402961,0.0,0.0,0.1501009092756088,0.14638629551441526,0.0,0.0,0.11803358185515772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750021563091412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875988067369774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406783325082283,0.2673920922183269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244551813107034,0.0,0.0,0.08980729620649265,0.17323521361081184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15536902400801922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177805107227233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888119259037874,0.0,0.07973240969449849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Business-Mafia,2020/01/04,"Greetings friends, I have suffered depression and I want to recommend this page, it can help you with something nice and you can also help someone with this. Well the page is a page dedicated and made for people who have felt depression, stress and various negative emotions that we all feel throughout life.

It is not a very super page of advice but I liked it because it is quite direct with what it gives for people and you are not obligated to anything with it.

I personally have liked it a lot and that's why I want to recommend it to see it.

Look for her by name is that it is very new

​

educatedgentlemanoffortune

​

I know the name is half funny but that is the point to attract people with a desire to have a quiet time.",7.1709265734265735,7.091313531468532,7.224606643356648,75.10306381118883,64.03496503496504,9.9472027972028,33.259615384615394,9.516144504307137,2.901112587412588,597,22,112,10,8,192,76,143,0.08199999999999999,0.677,0.24100000000000002,0.9707,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,1,3,0,2,2,11,0,1,8,0,14,1,0,1,1,27,23,9,0,3,4,0,2,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,18,12,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,4,1,1,2,5,11,7,16,21,7,3,0,3,2,0,13,1,0,1,4,84,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912302662358275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385381889244335,0.0,0.3085172463034757,0.345992032956217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171589774950373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678787370199784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452473969817391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014790522542266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198691729982115,0.0,0.13669822456859382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999527046378564,0.0,0.0,0.13657497423683745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19085619443622787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824322820706643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056065483648816,0.13911029151406826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955555364119973,0.0,0.0,0.12103850081439098,0.0,0.1347146242056481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750253524155412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961058077303848,0.1243126272643258,0.0,0.0,0.13458635523889942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514287928540827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345103656669245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206302549211839,0.10960394119862288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16308518668306707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301751579060146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349415199794657,0.16794788688869386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800838155111724,0.0,0.12846743670844507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.345992032956217,0.0
mentalhealth,Acaciahoneyy,2020/01/04,"Good media to watch about bipolar disorder? I was recently diagnosed with Bipolar (2, not 1, I believe) and I really want to learn more. Good articles, movies, tv, etc?",2.5730000000000004,5.5375846333333385,4.641666666666668,75.14250000000001,86.0,9.666666666666668,30.83333333333333,9.516144504307137,4.341333333333335,129,7,21,5,4,44,25,30,0.081,0.688,0.23199999999999998,0.6191,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,2,4,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,12,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3673949490511405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3309773557311081,0.0,0.0,0.3737306316937872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636797014290983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5470223847060902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20890341539237006,0.0,0.32197732704260845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923379984441987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,danrod7272,2020/01/04,"How can I get my foot in the door in the mental health field? I am interested in becoming a LMHC.  I already have some graduate school experience toward becoming a LMHC.  I have a BA in philosophy-psychology.  I am wondering what kinds of jobs I can get in the mental health field with my BA that will be useful experience prior to becoming a LMHC.  
Any advice is appreciated.  
Have a great day!",3.3323428571428586,5.662702653333334,6.052571428571429,70.75200000000002,75.8,10.152380952380954,26.714285714285715,10.290406445055957,3.344428571428572,309,12,57,11,7,111,45,75,0.0,0.816,0.184,0.9229999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,8,0,10,3,1,2,0,5,14,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,3,9,12,1,8,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,2,2,39,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817911053321516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18992225602691395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117037368818693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5702296795509056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109935507309944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33670362172183915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983562133940278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897464788482464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3658793437397584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707877541597768,0.0,0.0,0.1792209759999742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468829197800916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17417954808856126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864354693849358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18664063797615252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sleep_dirt_,2020/01/04,"I Feel Like I Can Never Be Myself It's like I have to be a different person to deal with everything and to be able to interact with people. I have to act uncaring and confident when deep down I'm such a sensitive person, too sensitive. Things wear on me so badly and when I'm by myself I feel like crying. I just feel lonely because I have no one I connect with and people just hurt me when they can it seems like. I end up dissociating almost all the time and feeling empty. I don't know what to do at all and I don't know what's wrong with me, I just want to get out of this awful cycle.",0.9585958005249359,2.7469436456692904,3.5894685039370096,88.17795603674541,81.04724409448819,6.753018372703411,19.24475065616798,7.793537801064563,0.6105175853018374,461,11,102,8,12,162,70,127,0.156,0.7020000000000001,0.142,-0.6043,1,2,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,9,8,0,0,3,1,11,1,1,0,3,26,22,10,0,1,3,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,11,0,0,7,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,0,4,18,4,18,19,2,13,0,2,0,0,5,6,0,2,10,76,24,0,0.1832399969987537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18348838803152526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299774355417142,0.11170140139827814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20128053241574406,0.0,0.1889123908644474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19144679621840616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16229624882830293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16468429391926606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3706065929137689,0.26181338093798456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573533547987816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961622066469271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014078204211936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580872268953105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14132598207293073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241681642547517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540710837032654,0.3199961949662869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668148112546775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12173651182403787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684871582699462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080796978144814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003441712214976,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,foxxyfay,2020/01/04,"Self hatred (help!) How do you cope with self hatred? I just feel like I hate myself so much and this makes me want to hurt myself and makes my life miserable. I’m constantly wishing I was dead so I would r have to deal with anything else. How do you stop hating yourself? What are strategies that have helped you?

(I’m not suicidal)",1.2495454545454552,3.775908424242424,2.109318181818182,94.6339772727273,85.96969696969695,5.118181818181818,18.85606060606061,6.6274283507984215,0.08409696969697,260,7,54,3,8,81,47,66,0.353,0.578,0.069,-0.9791,0,0,0,0,0,2,10.0,0,3,0,0,5,5,2,1,0,0,7,1,0,4,0,15,16,6,2,3,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,11,1,4,14,1,2,0,2,0,0,8,0,0,0,3,34,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17272868310225292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22682584478636875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21639626481665303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753433668220153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613105108667917,0.14995161898790435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4144628716802629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813812465056174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247008183123691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482576056328467,0.10254586534016707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802179229359914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429963994960627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379400842246048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17548464837545572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295950268265792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380364677268978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24137305888776125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14910596026609513,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Holistic-Info,2020/01/04,"Generalized Anxiety Disorder  [https://youtu.be/BMK6xZfStHQ](https://youtu.be/BMK6xZfStHQ)

Generalized Anxiety Disorder is one of the most common mental disorders. It is believed that approximately 20% of all adults are affected by this anxiety disorders each year.  Is there an environmental influence?",16.165000000000006,22.15952813513513,12.893175675675677,19.100304054054106,51.43243243243244,18.835135135135136,49.79054054054054,13.816669648895859,11.483762162162163,259,15,20,14,4,78,29,37,0.281,0.7190000000000001,0.0,-0.8442,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,1,7,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,17,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.422957956759784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20763855516651555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8448770304195475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572708702088275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12488378353125412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868062373047085
mentalhealth,PolicyPaul,2020/01/04,"Asked to be a best man. First time being asked. So I’m kind of freaking out about it lol. I live in Ky now and all my buddies live in MN (my home state). I was kind of thinking Chicago (halfway and a lot of things to do). I was thinking here in Ky... kinda seems shitty on my part but I live in the bourbon capital of the world so we could do a private tour of a distillery and whatnot. I don’t wanna do the cliché trip to Vegas. I grew up with this guy so I know he would be fine with anything I plan. Just wanna do it right. Thank you for any advice and if this isn’t appropriate for the forum, just delete it.",-0.08798701298701063,1.8188069545454584,2.0325974025974034,97.28318181818184,85.51515151515152,4.377489177489178,19.277056277056275,5.288315135182226,-0.4777852813852817,466,13,111,2,14,156,82,132,0.034,0.887,0.079,0.6949,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,1,0,3,8,6,0,0,8,1,13,0,0,0,1,23,21,9,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,6,8,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,2,0,13,5,22,14,4,15,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,4,3,80,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816916071363564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12644083779643406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15300704296147916,0.0,0.3476445719442281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19512524611438456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845239668565688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15815454218672695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841029342059592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18650599132739384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3872412817351716,0.10218393191619086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4925468215928746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580736149296372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20134735480712765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878579355923794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926644933859294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711821551388597,0.0,0.0,0.12352564473343633,0.23827675874583396,0.0,0.0,0.10841904629686516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208149137998873,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Smokiethehottie,2020/01/04,Not sure what to do So right around thanksgiving I started seeing therapist and he ended up prescribing me Wellbutrin to coincide with the Zoloft my regular prescribed. Now on Jan. 2 my employer fired me. So I am losing my insurance. What do I do now,4.587765957446809,6.826875382978728,5.813776595744681,74.30875,71.7659574468085,10.657446808510642,33.026595744680854,10.686352973137794,4.365557446808511,201,10,34,7,4,67,36,47,0.174,0.826,0.0,-0.8147,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,5,6,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,8,1,6,6,0,8,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,4,27,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33815827338172594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33644553811995576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4249691142622609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32440060773012297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027013325581043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268868722372232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580160302441446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4410497875930054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ArrowTaker101,2020/01/04,"Tips for converting maladaptive daydreaming to creative works? Or reducing it? So, I have a bad habit of just listening to music and daydreaming that's starting to get out of hand. I'm also an artist and aspiring comic artist, so I thought that maybe if I converted pacing to drawing it would at least be more productive. But I'm also open to tips on how to start doing it less too, since I can't dedicate all my time to drawing. Any tips for either? Thank you for taking the time to read this.",4.532798232695144,5.8259035463917535,5.507069219440354,80.26072164948455,70.23711340206185,9.666568483063331,29.32106038291605,9.957137785484203,2.9140792341678936,392,15,75,10,7,129,69,97,0.039,0.867,0.094,0.6555,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,7,2,0,0,3,0,5,1,1,1,1,13,14,10,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,6,1,16,11,5,8,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,4,53,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4414493457890724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18769590390458216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304563779577188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14420355584818215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772886101245951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760841614007709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22831788522342625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3907218459931645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075247711252389,0.0,0.0,0.2541124363067835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21912068808199506,0.32188668233795525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009381809207879,0.0,0.0,0.1960692079053231,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nikhilfifa,2020/01/04,"I have lost enthusiasm for everything Hey everyone! I am a 21 years old engineering student. Its been some time, roughly 2-3 years I guess? The last time I was enthusiastic about anything, when I tried to do anything to make an impact on my life and had goals. Now I feel like a dead body being carried by the sea. Just going with the flow, barely doing anything to change the direction I am heading in, accepting everything as it is. I have stop putting any efforts in anything, I dont feel energetic at all, I sleep all the time or binge watch just to feel distracted. Doing all these escape from realities makes me feel even worse as I know I am not doing anything for my career while my friends around me are doing so much and achieving so much. I just want to put efforts in something and be enthusiastic about something. I just wanna feel, its been so long since I had felt something for anyone or anything. I dont know what to do.",5.303882783882784,6.155472813186817,6.015109890109893,78.95072344322345,68.12087912087911,8.704029304029303,31.650183150183143,8.841846274778883,2.5232842490842486,740,30,142,12,12,242,106,182,0.09,0.7959999999999999,0.114,0.5187,0,0,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,5,13,5,0,1,8,0,22,4,3,2,3,31,36,12,1,2,7,0,7,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,9,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,7,8,21,3,23,27,6,22,0,1,1,0,2,6,0,4,13,102,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772378631927906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941733305555437,0.0,0.5607968402179689,0.10110971532299402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616107019102918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015190837984452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662283404263651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501809957493186,0.0,0.0,0.10852995086180488,0.20415561974782007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871456988182431,0.08114112125025975,0.10905400229177342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775113586952793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06454977072612203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512047590678196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656519642495301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484049760174505,0.09258234193914364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022446463814689,0.0554891407604641,0.0,0.0,0.10051416413860824,0.0,0.0,0.12398529416301107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516302165652462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698780418012474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918243775562287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283572658751733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395402465638862,0.0,0.1136613909392582,0.0,0.0,0.2623168331348206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495743512139487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986871238274792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771129334797726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699205238202505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574707657695665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462827747891035
mentalhealth,throwaway-the-secret,2020/01/04,"Should I try to kill my desire to suffer? There's this part of me (16F) that wants to be hurt. I think it goes back to me wanting to feel bad for myself/wanting other people to feel bad for me/wanting other people to feel guilty for hurting me.

Usually I indulge in this desire by fantasizing, imagining a character in my head that's a version of my self, and fantasizing about them being hurt in some way, usually emotionally. Sometimes I'll even listen to sad emotional songs and project the meaning onto the character. 

I'm asking if I should try to stop this part of me because of something that happened a while ago. Long story short, I had reason to believe that one of my friends was in danger. Although I was worried about her and took the steps to make sure she was okay, I had the thought that if something HAD happened to her it would be nice to be able to feel bad for myself because of all the grief I would be feeling. That made me scared that maybe I actually wanted her to be hurt.

I feel really guilty about that thought, and I was quick to repress it, but it makes me feel like I should try to end this weird desire I have to be hurt, since i dont think having the thought that i had right then was okay at all. 

Should I try to stop this? If so, what can I do to stop it?

EDIT: I have a therapist but I dont get to see her very often. My parents are looking into getting me a new therapist, but that might take a while so if I do need to stop these feelings, I'd like some advice on what I can do by myself.",5.14222222222222,4.78662163694268,5.9069639065817405,83.78302901627744,68.29936305732485,8.633828733191791,30.18329794762916,7.984000788550335,1.8498958244869084,1190,40,254,13,18,391,140,314,0.165,0.755,0.08,-0.9734,1,0,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,1,0,10,23,2,2,12,2,34,1,1,4,3,56,66,17,2,17,7,1,8,2,1,7,0,2,0,1,25,5,0,5,16,1,0,2,2,16,0,1,14,12,41,7,45,38,7,28,0,8,2,0,11,10,0,8,17,186,66,2,0.08005612356761396,0.0,0.07812322836733165,0.0,0.0,0.07822991741551688,0.07096492323259676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484166875341525,0.0,0.0,0.061558217453896974,0.2005305576973269,0.09760293974548603,0.0,0.0,0.09019583675968282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18765036118869335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18010472750783518,0.07090596356453341,0.0,0.0,0.05287631458912568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.323830251945255,0.11438422134534652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06185116248053772,0.0,0.08365204073885935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158673136286562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216067897258035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4285086801963065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857023942606562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822275636827851,0.0,0.0,0.07084715013804574,0.06722698114685823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575103979576464,0.10687616825473943,0.0,0.08042713639802637,0.08720458782196036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492689594093543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05936060123792732,0.0,0.07731870300288299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424810119817781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888928512183546,0.17338596082287092,0.0,0.11100167215154748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05128600271161494,0.08231102835605904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836749210751465,0.0,0.0,0.08015014559485563,0.0,0.06379436558212923,0.0,0.08351599647281502,0.0,0.0,0.06622325269228453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326223022134865,0.07917755323814936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677220159137804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754519490371702,0.0,0.060192241815338665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18590265957436944,0.0,0.1025934629150721,0.0,0.1906668592707211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889452989304164,0.21741141152177645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17634101973156158,0.0660546860987932,0.1888767034512743,0.06354482458214479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08130087949962594,0.0,0.11373914652007334,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hollowed-out,2020/01/04,I can’t think anymore I’ve been in this state of mind for as long as I can remember. I’ve always been depressed and I’m not just throwing that word around lightly like most people do. I’m out of high school and haven’t done anything since. I have nobody. I’m terrified that I’m going to hurt someone or myself because of the hatred I’ve always felt building up inside of me. I only post here because I don’t want that to happen and I don’t know what to do anymore.,3.1398571428571422,3.883535100000003,4.613428571428571,87.43100000000004,73.0,6.514285714285713,26.285714285714285,6.1826913282559595,0.9063714285714282,370,12,78,2,7,124,62,100,0.156,0.805,0.04,-0.9201,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,11,0,0,0,0,16,21,6,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,4,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,4,2,8,1,14,17,1,10,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,2,2,47,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360346179232547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4005095692690036,0.0,0.0,0.1661666081051238,0.1797555610530871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24618252746918556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739172233079303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066388076222362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19387912728683468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475831195504756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17856111441880462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21334425607730625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21616428810094404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097239081754616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865008122995464,0.0,0.0,0.17869677420018065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20388612106229514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357263481725072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13998898124806572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933877953581906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287410264122905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043583123583058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16703398245513534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17108992177708804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12938502707044067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910026572184522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jolly_Llama_,2020/01/04,"Mom called me useless how can I not let it make me spiral? All because I didn’t wanna wait in a line because I get anxious.I tried telling her that I think I have depression and downplayed it and said I was just sad but that was a long time ago.

I’m upset/angry about it and but I don’t want to start 2020 going back to self harming and going into a depression Spiral.If anyone can help then thanks.",1.3372058823529436,3.204546882352944,2.99139705882353,92.54003676470587,80.17647058823529,5.191176470588236,21.213235294117645,5.985473137389443,0.11408823529411773,315,9,68,2,8,104,59,85,0.18899999999999997,0.708,0.10300000000000001,-0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,3,0,8,0,0,2,1,16,19,8,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,5,5,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,4,1,10,1,6,14,1,10,0,4,0,0,7,2,0,0,6,44,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19839242344736385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528395079529226,0.0,0.15649186407983712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17209465447809713,0.0,0.2728627449962429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285331470316037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3855312677287091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116930522380082,0.0,0.2543906615396082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001388699826793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288589994751556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19806317219786568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14939367974322326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26212140334265965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128928046509564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334807138810875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584125623274865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19561819009500644,0.2060524773183121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143407227193541,0.0,0.0,0.13050433358451435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519510444460852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320078470585707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Theoresis1994,2020/01/04,I deserve to be miserable One intrusive thought that keeps coming back around to me over and over again,9.141052631578948,8.946567315789476,7.346315789473685,76.23421052631579,60.05263157894736,11.810526315789476,40.05263157894737,11.20814326018867,4.487589473684212,85,4,15,2,1,25,17,19,0.158,0.8420000000000001,0.0,-0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,5,2,0,6,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4448138720956704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38421680025597743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4304230441728851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4441312878432093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33859056880482913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3966836252133636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fishyfishesfishies,2020/01/04,"Is this person ok? I was scrolling through TikTok and stumbled across this woman. Her account was public so I’m sure she has no problem with being seen. She wants to get her message out there anyway. 
 

TikTok: user2864263151458",3.3338333333333345,6.514426050000001,2.055000000000004,92.20333333333336,88.5,2.666666666666667,24.16666666666667,3.1291,0.1386666666666665,182,7,29,0,6,51,34,40,0.11199999999999999,0.778,0.109,-0.0314,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,6,9,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,5,2,5,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,0,0,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29265180541509594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4890956077681886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5359815810843461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5279285218336148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33038708785612364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nippe13,2020/01/04,I don't know what to do. Please help. So I am a 13yo male and live in Finland. I have been diagnosed with severe depression and generalized anxiety disorder for the last 8 months. I have been medicated for about 4 months. My antidepressant is sertraline and I take 100mg of it every day. I have panic attacks frequently and I have had therapy once a week for the last 8 months. The therapy does not help me at all and I feel like it's just a waste of time. The medication also seems like it isn't helping. I have suicidal thoughts pretty frequently and I'm afraid I might do it. Ask any questions if you want.   I don't know what to do. Please help.,1.0003912213740451,3.476505389312983,3.0962547709923705,87.44682490458015,86.70992366412213,7.549809160305344,22.691316793893126,8.472884824447931,1.747156106870229,510,19,108,14,16,172,79,131,0.157,0.655,0.188,0.4943,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,0,4,6,1,2,7,0,17,3,0,0,1,20,26,9,1,2,3,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,6,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,1,14,2,11,21,1,12,0,1,0,0,8,2,0,4,12,67,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883938486632913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925528915957,0.0,0.10411638005809308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723543651612496,0.15483377365150947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777345366112507,0.0,0.11722301494681148,0.138138970234471,0.0,0.0,0.15598276955599527,0.0,0.11910231609688356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146703981284652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881641629199549,0.09723010306854024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3649007297680775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959436426208692,0.22187986831747045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329834932569998,0.0,0.1201790850149354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742135283333905,0.0,0.14438094255496328,0.0,0.0,0.3259019552096316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449424097982206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159684413001767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29879458473208664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846296473617126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246351781571496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390062901707267,0.0,0.1537546336748283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887167122999356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023305103937742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31128517762464075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804845960164282,0.07936119701277349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027550097302223,0.0,0.10917147541808987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bluebird1308,2020/01/04,"Lies my depression told me I've just finished listening to a podcast episode from the show 'The Hilarious World of Depression'. I found it after seeing a recommendation online while looking for online self help stuff. The episode name was 'Depression's Eleven Big Lies EXPOSED!', obviously mocking how many people create things like that where the thing is exaggerated. However this wasn't exaggerated - the episode was very moving for me.

I identified with many of the lies that were said on the show, which were described by people who had sent videos of themselves describing their experiences of depression lying to them. Already this has set me on a path to understand why my depression is doing this, and I'm going to detail some of the lies it has told me.

**Depression told me that I'm not worth love or friendship from anybody else, and anybody that offers it is stupid.**

It immediately occurred to me on hearing this that it was a lie I'd been telling myself - I am absolutely worthy of friendship just like anybody else. I had been telling myself this due to my own insecurities, and it is evident that it isn't the case at all. I don't know why depression is telling me this and it's something I need to explore more.

**Depression told me that there's nothing good about me and that I have no value.**

This is true because I felt as though I have no talents and that there's nothing positive about me. But apparently this isn't the truth - I've been told by many people that I have values, such as being kind enough to help others, that I have intelligence which is backed up by going to university, and that I have resilience for overcoming the first few years of my leukaemia treatment. I would do self destructive things such as ending friendships and drink a lot of alcohol on multiple occasions because I didn't care about myself.

**Depression has told me that I don't actually have any friends and that people secretly hate me.**

This is a big one. I have always felt like I wasn't accepted and that I never had any true friends. Although when I look back at it, I do. I have been more social than ever when I got to university, and made more friends than ever. Depression told me this because I had a bad experience with bullying in school and it's telling me that people still feel like this. My friends do support me and want to do things with me, backed up by the fact they've always wanted to help me and plan things (with one even driving to me late at night to speak to me and urge me to go to therapy).

**That I'm a burden on others and I don't deserve to be helped because depression is stupid and it makes me weak and silly.**

I was always looking to others for support because I wanted validation for how I was feeling. I rejected their advice because my depression was telling me that it's not really an illness and that I'm just being stupid, and that others have far worse problems. I was urged to go to the GP, which I did, and due to the antidepressants that I was prescribed evidently not working within a few weeks (I thought they should have been). This made me feel that actually I wasn't depressed, but the truth is that it's a medical condition and it needs time to work. I also needed to go to therapy to get to the deep root of my problems.

All in all, I feel like the podcast made me realise many of the lies that I've been telling myself. It's surprising that a podcast can feel like a therapy session, while also poking fun at the lies to make you realise how silly it all really is (hence the title poking fun at depression). I do recommend this podcast to anyone that is feeling these same things, and is also feeling quite down in the dumps - it may make you realise many of the things you've been feeling just like it did for me.

If you would like to read more posts like this, I'm doing a blog about my mental health. [Link](http://Philsblog99.wordpress.com)",4.932314713399052,6.453221574297189,5.440242424242424,80.24945454545455,69.53547523427042,8.53848363149568,30.04768163563344,8.995579910939314,2.486201285140562,3104,123,582,58,55,996,266,747,0.115,0.763,0.122,0.4668,2,1,3,0,0,1,86.0,0,3,4,5,29,58,7,1,36,0,74,7,0,10,13,94,132,42,0,12,11,0,10,9,4,4,5,4,0,2,75,27,2,0,17,6,1,9,15,28,0,4,44,18,80,30,84,81,15,56,0,15,4,1,41,23,0,5,31,429,155,5,0.0,0.0,0.08718775978822306,0.0,0.0,0.04365341391043168,0.0,0.047741277278065056,0.0,0.0,0.04929717386933403,0.10717365777649077,0.1115132037781302,0.0,0.0,0.060757613568436834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03123602487798758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305109994544033,0.0372996407088745,0.1633915131836577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04554655338232834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5386685779850292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04376200684241801,0.0,0.0,0.07463622133037355,0.0,0.0395665428068906,0.0461585960725346,0.0,0.029505740553926036,0.08081760082066765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739648174832018,0.0,0.0,0.18070191675904365,0.12765606622564155,0.0857851402853601,0.0,0.0,0.03799837428214667,0.0,0.04898104999426698,0.13805533666938166,0.0,0.023339518175826475,0.0,0.12694195125257518,0.03746914256798505,0.035728649639047115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04410480873130239,0.0,0.04748473928453308,0.050349112596472484,0.0,0.11977204141247752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04651949592284985,0.024550817427605173,0.0,0.050392484159368436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19642238074597615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125408538410586,0.0,0.0,0.03797893061545202,0.04031864206678473,0.1268104941279484,0.08945764799682014,0.2264543297570619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045002806780193014,0.04501933571776371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04747975851549077,0.0,0.09937219601221296,0.03445415750385054,0.0,0.0,0.04192208041292271,0.0,0.0857288663128313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06054243424240983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548513055895294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04278387102943551,0.0,0.0,0.08549102805556122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04751466333680068,0.04468455209145477,0.0,0.0572366475165825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04249374228828436,0.0,0.0,0.04521091759454999,0.03559816931824745,0.0,0.09320624340699643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04553795038280247,0.0,0.03439104458461418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035675486728255636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05113928244318788,0.0,0.1013875634404013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342742105472229,0.0,0.1532605643564153,0.0,0.20774879633478915,0.0,0.04389046816997553,0.03546494572972625,0.02604887247334094,0.0,0.0,0.29880517014192376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04650560953416438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03685946052682798,0.07904692845963164,0.0,0.035833555288166584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061989916046462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504417034980291,0.0,0.04552505636248241,0.0634680721249895,0.0,0.0,0.02876760158476462
mentalhealth,LineCluster,2020/01/04,"How do I stop overthinking and constantly worrying about the future?   

Hi Reddit!

First time posting here and looking for some outside advice. 

  I’ve had a rough time when it comes to mental health lately, but I’m slowly getting better. A big issue of mine that I constantly have problems with though, is obsessive overthinking and overworrying that makes me extremely anxious about *everything*. I do that a lot, to the point it’s affecting my life. I’m aware that I’m the most stressed I’ve been in a while now (I have lots of stuff going on: I’m a 22F, a full-time student, financially independent –  so I work a lot, I've got a possible big life changes coming up, I'm in a serious relationship for the first time…), but the overthinking and worrying is getting out of hand. 

  It’s affecting my relationship in particular – I’ve been dating my great friend (also 22F, and a fellow student) for 3-4 months now, and though we really care for each other, the general circumstances are not ideal. My girlfriend has an extremely homophobic family, and though it’s all nice and easy for us to be together when we’re away from our homes during academic year, the future is very uncertain. I got stuck in a rather selfish loop of thinking that I’ll obviously never be ‘worth’ risking her family’s anger, and therefore she’ll clearly just break up with me. Which is very, very one-sided way of looking at this whole ordeal – she truly cares for me and treats me very well, and though she doesn’t like to talk about it, it clearly hurts her to think she might have to pick between me and her parents at some point. We promised ourselves to give this relationship a fair shot despite the bad circumstances, and she’s been nothing but true to her promise. Me, on the other hand – I just constantly worry and overanalyze and overthink, which leads me to not properly appreciate the moments we spend with each other. 

  Similarly, the overthinking got my uni & job too – I worry so much about not meeting some invisible high standards I set for myself that sometimes I end up completely failing a task, because I’d rather not do something at all than to do it half-assed or not well enough. And half-assing things sometimes is kind of essential if you want to complete your uni course, maintain a job that pays all bills, be in a relationship and also do a decent work on your bachelor’s thesis. 

  Generally, the anxiety caused by all this worrying makes me completely underappreciate all the great things I've got going on in life - I'm just 22 and yet I have a job I really like in my preffered field, a loving new gf and a great group of friends. So, my question is – how do I stop this terrible cycle of constant worry/overthinking about the future? How do I stay aware of what’s going on in the moment, instead of needlesly overanalyzing things weeks or months before they even have a chance to happen?",7.524295343137259,7.394783034926476,7.685308823529412,72.26018137254903,63.319852941176464,11.150392156862745,35.045098039215695,10.722254614519581,3.7469852450980383,2297,92,414,53,30,747,258,544,0.12300000000000001,0.708,0.16899999999999998,0.9878,4,0,1,0,0,0,62.0,5,3,1,8,33,32,1,4,36,0,30,7,2,12,10,88,60,40,0,6,16,1,3,2,5,2,4,0,1,0,28,30,0,2,3,0,4,6,7,12,2,2,9,5,49,20,62,46,17,67,0,2,2,1,35,26,0,13,32,283,77,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298014902849948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308186438052078,0.0,0.0698319416333109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04930435146303068,0.0728105653840777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060553237831399036,0.0,0.05381336120410592,0.039288343218748564,0.0,0.054842512115712935,0.0,0.0,0.057001108774279136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142288141033864,0.06620827670748848,0.0681799384848144,0.11103656219603852,0.20272493888352536,0.27859178496521164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057083891941037676,0.06659445388530877,0.0,0.04256885706797922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05792383068827935,0.0,0.1215161330368024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096428920789821,0.0,0.0,0.09958838151189332,0.0,0.06734530939472116,0.06182666119155185,0.10988588004951258,0.0,0.20618737251305885,0.21317025897462014,0.0,0.0,0.056993243354253376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850772227930346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06809534732364751,0.06464896928173458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899544683250818,0.0,0.0,0.06726943448272253,0.191871121956632,0.0,0.0,0.06711513541559765,0.0,0.0,0.07270281698437589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656959272043234,0.06297438392178363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824414574993403,0.0,0.0,0.1643801821556473,0.0581689691258266,0.0,0.08604223584343662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495080724926444,0.06837165038125254,0.0,0.0,0.10288733007671476,0.0,0.047378432728351946,0.0,0.049708093362323735,0.06224656242377661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061841861755698724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043673234113585896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156450118135681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12185285090270805,0.07265810069751402,0.06172563224902891,0.0,0.0,0.06167029340003378,0.0,0.0,0.07219915697685397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257710606282366,0.0,0.0,0.2767822809383449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049617038374796654,0.12748611445322844,0.0,0.0,0.06869551181015712,0.0,0.10776677911407194,0.07382767332564026,0.0,0.07378024628476644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05180276062841221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284538725277739,0.08259438073316268,0.25328861856690793,0.0,0.11274457528761694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775258514025289,0.0,0.0,0.21271319781337705,0.038014494084757565,0.05115769841499958,0.05169819379763118,0.0,0.1158972334435944,0.0,0.0,0.07195652889183675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384126406404084,0.3272623617789287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04150392083236398
mentalhealth,CarharttLover,2020/01/04,"How do I learn to be more open with my problems I’ve been having a lot of suicidal thoughts lately, and I’ve only told two of my closest friends because they understand me the best. They help me with everything. 

I want to tell my pyschologist and family that I need help ASAP. That my suicidal thoughts are taking over my mind. But I just can’t find the courage to bring these problems up. 

The last time I ever felt suicidal was in 6th grade. Every night I would hold a knife to my wrist, but I couldn’t have the strength to do it. I would just cry and cry all night. I didn’t have friends to talk with, and the the reason I felt suicidal in the first place was because of my family so I didn’t even want to share it with them. I learnt to keep all my feelings to myself when I was younger and because of that I now struggle to be vocal about it.

I’ve already asked for help and thus is the reason I have a pyschologist. But how do I be open about all my problem, especially my suicidal thoughts?",3.8813310104529606,4.636763868292686,4.568519163763066,88.38908536585366,71.29268292682926,8.198606271777004,28.301393728223,8.418075326091056,1.7338710801393715,783,28,172,12,14,251,100,205,0.175,0.701,0.124,-0.9468,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,3,3,11,10,0,1,11,0,22,1,1,5,4,48,37,13,5,9,5,0,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,7,12,0,2,11,0,0,1,4,4,0,2,12,3,32,6,25,19,6,18,0,0,0,0,13,8,0,1,9,123,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11166772643797096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460072296192934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18505684367262185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061946070224074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223089985462894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683626475746425,0.09153382467457633,0.08525850079439377,0.0,0.09094471287932446,0.0,0.19078934693927216,0.0,0.05116564151565451,0.0,0.1943200963856382,0.0,0.0924875206932262,0.08607373874358992,0.0,0.0,0.15636114972189533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20348029875125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994396871926086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824848663558845,0.1141488181564628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602969504122343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217492530256872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503247704249605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18992339884104253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696096433252053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572394913558056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29048081211855925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20808415739307584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057876962012286,0.0,0.5534373171708029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608368021818684,0.08133417862262711,0.08844614001673573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24100508489887945,0.05900578343660584,0.0,0.0,0.0966931523327751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988497369462674,0.10534428803275976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193711537621288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376757853065306,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pizzapizzapls,2020/01/04,"I got brainwashed by myself Hello there kind redditors, which I seek help from. Prepare for a backstory. It all started 3 months ago. I was interested in political science, philosophy and such for about a year at that moment. And I remember myself being very reasonable and smart, and logic-relied during that ""past"" period. That is to say, I had a different mindset, way and habits of thinking. But it just happened, through books and other kinds of information sources, I got into theory of relativism (I didn't really know how it is called, I just didn't accept that there is an absolute truth). And I completely started losing morals, ethics, had a long depression. But my inner self wanted a point, so I started to seek it. It happened that I became interested in communism. And the more I was involved in theory, the more I ignored clear signs of contradiction in it. I already started, so my mind wouldn't admit it was all wrong. But it was... Now how did it happen? I felt that all I knew before was logically proved but relativism said there's no point in logic, and I was scared of it. The only escape was to rely on my feelings. I did rely on them while arguing, I was getting used to ignore my logic-self and it became my habit. This is how I made a different, now-functioning mindset that ignores facts and puts feelings over them. And because of it, no longer I can ignore public's opinions. I've became very dependent of people that I now feel it's destroying me. It's destroying my passions, values, logic and mind. I seek help. Thank you if you have read to this line. Please give me an advice on how to deprogram my brainwashed, changed mind to a better one, the one that doesn't put feelings over logic, because that is my main concern.

The post is written poorly but I believe I managed to get you to know about my problem.",4.5643386243386255,6.276131400000002,5.6821269841269855,77.41302116402116,70.71428571428571,8.4994708994709,29.53439153439154,9.049649993220411,2.662578835978836,1450,58,255,29,27,481,171,350,0.135,0.767,0.098,-0.9232,2,0,0,0,0,1,56.0,0,3,2,2,16,22,3,1,14,0,25,1,0,8,7,66,53,26,0,4,8,0,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,28,14,0,4,19,2,1,2,6,12,0,2,21,7,43,10,35,30,6,33,1,2,0,1,18,15,0,3,14,189,71,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014752160284594,0.09205149581357533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145945052143512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12660475330786164,0.0,0.08836364871043821,0.11699669796968305,0.0,0.09184163448254544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603639827417206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985324889312116,0.0,0.10887852381471837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944073886659105,0.0,0.0,0.21698988645978973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100267126587639,0.0,0.09970658492311407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850847330069564,0.09961668712298646,0.0,0.0,0.166107166232928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27548688455397324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392089723089948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162752222766324,0.11413996198570693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918987275299476,0.0,0.11617494365442713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825976278138007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145587015295349,0.0,0.08288733995692478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073484851019255,0.07897808892351234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991309078563295,0.07199239775027752,0.0,0.0,0.11398959683770267,0.19633240885855294,0.0,0.09945390672430872,0.0,0.0,0.0993647433650095,0.0,0.2087839294689572,0.0,0.0,0.10387216417755953,0.0,0.06652516551634527,0.10676899145363304,0.0,0.0,0.11763507962172486,0.0,0.09877948348802336,0.08258096649504712,0.10396602230513438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21666400947088268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940054476783019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560566085970387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653908221018857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968792847695006,0.0,0.17136445398413766,0.0612499185690681,0.08242658326882878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353718062912635,0.0,0.06687217158832683
mentalhealth,illegalburger,2020/01/04,"I HAVE NOONE. Im a 20 year old dude from Manchester, UK, and i suffer from Severe Depression, Anxiety, and Bipolar Disorder. Basically im fucked. 

All my life ive been told that i have a bad attitude by my teachers, general authority figures and my parents, but this has always infuriated me because i dont feel like i have a bad attitude, i feel like im doing the best i can with a broken brain and a piercing sadness that literally aches in my chest. you give it a go and see how your attitude is you prick. im just fucking sad and confused all the time of what im feeling and why and who i even am idk.

when i was 17, i asked my mum to come to my room because i had something to say, i said that if our current relationship didnt change, i was going to end up resenting her (we never saw eye to eye and the best way i knew how to approach it was to be honest with my problems like everyone says they want). Anyway my mum flipped out and kicked me out the house after a huge argument, i was homeless for about a week and then found a little shitty house in the centre of the city with a live in landlord and an african debt collecter. It sucked and the african guy used to talk to me like shit and be aggressive.

I spent the better part of a year getting blackout drunk on my own or getting a couple grams of ketamine or MDMA and staying up all night (this is how i spent my 18th birthday), i was alone. every fucking moment of my life was hell, i was seeing on social media that all the kids i went to school with were getting awesome 18th birthday presents and they were all going off to college etc. and i was sat unable to move on my bed in a puddle of tears, sweat, blood and piss high off my face on 2 grams of ket. it wasnt even about the presents they got i just wanted someone to care that it WAS my birthday, that i exist and that theyre stoked on it. but i had noone.

anyway i moved back to my parents after 10ish months as i got a job there so it would make my life easier, but they insisted that if i was to live in ""their"" house (the house ive lived in all my life) that i would have to work on controlling and suppressing my mental health.
After 3 months I got kicked out again because my mum said she didnt want to be stepping on eggshells in her own house, which effectively means, she felt like my self suppression wasnt enough and she was noticing that i was sad all the time. she used to tell me to just cheer up or swear at me and call me miserable and tell me that im bringing everyone else around me down too.

Ive got bored of typing but basically:

i just smashed a 32 inch tv by repeatedly smashing my head into it, just because i couldnt think straight and i didnt know how else to release my anger. my head hurts. my heart hearts. the tv is fucked. there is no cure. i am alone.",5.079971412235565,4.591535190394512,5.812178387650089,84.85839336763866,68.45111492281303,8.919153802172671,30.188107489994287,8.296473431620573,1.878712292738708,2188,73,485,27,33,717,266,583,0.222,0.705,0.073,-0.9981,5,2,1,0,0,0,52.0,2,3,5,6,23,35,12,2,29,0,45,25,14,9,8,87,90,41,0,9,14,5,4,5,0,2,6,4,3,3,24,35,1,3,11,3,3,10,9,24,0,0,37,13,85,11,69,47,14,69,1,7,5,4,38,32,9,6,30,319,109,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041216028637126,0.0,0.0,0.05238656485581936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816312555147114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0560464657808107,0.05885775417953575,0.0,0.0,0.048411245913948686,0.10513553449591212,0.1535158135948889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13214224753509818,0.055681729441815785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028257384217416,0.06428772825040678,0.0,0.06419044719053242,0.0,0.0666018077491176,0.05423322411878257,0.0,0.0,0.07061337774768674,0.0,0.06966244839205249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05422611488466174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215596344974565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737869626272945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10518759528502702,0.0,0.055762596463403716,0.06505302165701837,0.07021543598072874,0.08316706930361012,0.0,0.05304530160400204,0.12031920291216372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550121784942088,0.08995521470991777,0.06045009016375244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903081066532933,0.0,0.2328166943471805,0.09867974617147247,0.06039558694184961,0.10734240041930064,0.0,0.20141484503493715,0.0,0.0,0.062338872053287635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12922729080573087,0.06692200447778872,0.0,0.1492123918458553,0.0,0.06651917458196438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3632286223625564,0.06739843988751412,0.0,0.4080362868248392,0.0,0.062476655455912126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034600377691422386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787796940234188,0.15379185961028416,0.06310101624147439,0.16678068399052068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04202532722455565,0.0,0.0,0.0685803280290762,0.0,0.0,0.06344741977919195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050584277243962,0.13382996979044046,0.0,0.0,0.04855752221645153,0.0,0.0,0.05908234298815356,0.0,0.0,0.07167873706761779,0.0660644172323669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981605895416935,0.06817798447224939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602428385261091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759393112214279,0.0,0.0,0.11977601454877734,0.10013434667900578,0.0,0.06371742322470587,0.10033964100516014,0.0,0.06567950811801762,0.0711252515854789,0.06462605639891296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417832266418001,0.05334458300007327,0.04846857483825424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710544732782882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050603705150240284,0.11005711170577004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04034130265439252,0.0,0.0,0.07342328447279002,0.0,0.0,0.06015960145608186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875196191329907,0.0,0.0,0.1114037684535416,0.04997357390520407,0.050501558681419936,0.0,0.0,0.05836321524060855,0.0568103072050861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04583458101476197,0.0,0.0,0.08944790833733503,0.0,0.0,0.08108649604391698
mentalhealth,lightsxthunder,2020/01/04,"How can I tell if I have anxiety? Sometimes I feel like I have anxiety. I haven't talked to my therapist about it, at least not directly, and although he has mentioned that I might go through ""moments that make me anxious"" he's never referred to it as ""anxiety"".

I don't know if thinking/knowing I have anxiety or not will make a difference in my life, but I was wondering if there is anything to notice, so maybe later I could bring it up in therapy.

Thank you all in advance!",2.340725146198832,4.482342347368423,4.1771929824561465,83.91479532163747,78.15789473684211,8.011695906432749,31.60818713450293,8.841846274778883,2.9408362573099414,373,20,73,9,9,126,66,95,0.069,0.872,0.059000000000000004,0.4102,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,4,2,0,0,1,0,12,1,0,3,2,19,20,10,0,4,7,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,4,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,1,14,2,11,16,2,11,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,6,4,58,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5686526822620865,0.2099405127239136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15292626779851856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14837402600217667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19415789122357946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939636964094243,0.13276047168489402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561424191219557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20425997437065851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13126066785766025,0.0907895329425844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480924439138222,0.0,0.1866961096361336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19714143491542324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14332731179830274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115742366590175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837954429573981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493670330600302,0.16242787157423327,0.17109178500811498,0.21251837499766515,0.2157686128583647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20152999452982345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AlternativeAnnie,2020/01/04,"List of Stress-Relievers What are your favorite (inexpensive) ways to de-stress? What soothes you, or helps you feel calm? Let's make a massive list to help us when we need ideas of how to cope... I'll start:
1. Epsom salt bath
2. Yin/Restorative Yoga
3. The Grounding Game: 5, 4, 3, 2, 1
4. Drawing or Painting
5. Working out",-0.4269230769230745,1.8098220769230802,1.2865384615384627,97.41596153846157,97.46153846153842,3.830769230769232,21.884615384615387,5.6839178017228535,0.08595384615384605,245,10,54,2,10,79,52,65,0.0,0.831,0.16899999999999998,0.8738,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,2,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,9,6,4,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,6,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,2,2,21,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648373240143902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36185416386285296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047159124515021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760197190894991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801790692567784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20014822866927065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19105646294948198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6184033380728124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32469020852652564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142563218023748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19651083507063724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marksparky95,2020/01/04,Becoming very easily stressed and frustrated It used to be nothing could piss me off now very little thins such has going over a bump in the car can really piss me off,6.08818181818182,6.4599634242424235,6.578333333333338,77.28750000000002,66.27272727272728,11.44848484848485,28.62121212121212,11.20814326018867,3.2250121212121217,135,4,26,4,2,44,29,33,0.151,0.67,0.179,0.0337,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,1,2,0,4,2,2,1,0,3,6,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,5,4,0,9,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,17,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3622099709450845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618522056940167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18638924171946486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3287056332735401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3146898686338305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21010184623587316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.375681135088825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.283255204430093,0.0,0.5412085468982929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thethrowawayguy82,2020/01/04,"Things that are supposed to emotionally shake me don't, and things that don't seem like a big deal to other people are a huge deal to me I've always been this way.
When a family member dies I am barely shook at all, when my grandfather died I had to fake being sad about it because I didnt want to come off as a psychopath.

When my parents divorced everyone was very shook and concerned and my sister was extremely depressed for a long time, but I genuinely didn't have any emotional response to it, I was just like ""eh, alright then.""

But then when my favorite cartoon series that I had been watching for 9 years (no exaggeration) ended I felt 100 times more emotionally shook than when I lost some close family members;
or when my ex broke up with me, I genuinely have never felt pain that intense.

Is something wrong with me?

Why does something as mundane as a breakup completely shatter me emotionally and render me unable to function for almost a year but a family tragedy doesn't even remotely hurt me?",8.937559009786993,7.344245404145081,8.669706390328152,71.09997697179044,61.279792746114,11.686586067933213,38.54289004029937,10.504223727775694,3.9583867587795054,805,33,146,15,9,260,117,193,0.187,0.73,0.084,-0.9408,1,0,2,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,9,15,0,4,8,1,19,1,0,0,2,21,25,19,2,1,5,3,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,10,8,0,0,3,0,0,5,7,12,0,0,12,3,21,3,20,12,3,27,0,5,1,0,6,6,0,4,17,101,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172681820556586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114935104604283,0.0,0.0,0.08266635217181653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410308808739997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471492910152293,0.12745548062399875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250650240118568,0.10470120240614338,0.0,0.25232439980686105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637975580442503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5469637091781356,0.10766788126763563,0.0,0.0,0.08029057747548565,0.0,0.0,0.1161577336330212,0.0,0.0,0.3437936028632008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334372336711484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13013467240886442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877813968950356,0.0,0.0,0.10757857542223584,0.0,0.0,0.1326993208735275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375613526322446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935057573788136,0.0,0.13498025369627287,0.0,0.0,0.08427580881010538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066551088837924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871687866730348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16152082867759876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176760008089573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10030140967738227,0.07170043766102244,0.09649028493994376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969082859958627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132909001874462,0.0,0.15656392962610186
mentalhealth,TheTimeVortex11,2020/01/04,My parents are forcing me to schedule my own appointments for psychiatry and counselling after i refused to go numerous times for reasons explained below. i might have social anxiety because im terrified and loathe talking to people i dont know or dont know very well. Im really disappointed that practically nobody replied to this. This was important for me and i assumed since its a mental health subreddit there’d be people to offer advice.,6.726041666666671,8.806970187500006,7.605,64.28666666666669,65.875,10.333333333333336,38.333333333333336,10.504223727775694,4.930958333333334,365,20,51,10,6,122,59,80,0.203,0.775,0.022000000000000002,-0.929,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,1,0,11,11,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,5,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,8,1,10,8,1,5,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,3,3,36,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19277014324542946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15091115281182546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025407476769512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4623983790532037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121131931492102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20968898360693625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4261713065665183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21682907101022347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19880194966958928,0.20927249365441036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21904519688854948,0.0,0.0,0.2735246175383506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637633294040174,0.2028266071482375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16318393690567612,0.0,0.0,0.20109211243838965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585583035430559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502983222276465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16276856376650836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17736958896811114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Koudelika,2020/01/04,"Brain disease If they called mental health problems ’brain disease’ maybe people would actually be more willing to recognise the pain you’re in. Do you now why I’m exhausted all the time? Because I’m severely depressed and just getting out of bed is a chore. Do you know why I don’t leave the house? Because just being around people is so exhausting because I have to pretend I’m fine whilst hiding the fact I’m having a panic attack. People are so happy to pretend they don’t see your pain and label you as lazy or telling you to get over it. I’m barely surviving and each day is a struggle. I need help. I want you to help. But instead you keeping pushing me down. But if I walked in one day and told you I had brain disease, I’d bet you listen. I bet you’d care about the fact that I’m becoming increasingly withdrawn. I bet you want to try and help me get better. If only I had brain disease instead, maybe I could actually get better.",2.926078947368424,4.700947647368423,4.2570394736842125,85.69240131578948,75.15789473684211,6.434210526315789,27.13815789473684,7.1686216300943375,1.3921315789473685,743,29,146,8,16,245,102,190,0.18899999999999997,0.6759999999999999,0.136,-0.8736,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,11,2,3,10,14,1,2,8,0,18,9,4,0,3,30,37,14,0,9,8,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,2,0,2,8,0,1,1,2,3,3,2,9,0,1,3,2,25,5,15,28,4,14,0,1,1,0,20,6,0,7,5,89,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.21646441678959014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873345748415986,0.0,0.1261761916931025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202829208455282,0.1224914348372976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19618184982398326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4952491772424659,0.11325156003213994,0.0,0.113080186239782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855264891543861,0.0,0.0,0.14305561188011254,0.0,0.0955266622775884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317836908461429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806580902018435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789219519573667,0.0,0.0,0.2230220029310176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797530493115306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858194713905258,0.0,0.0,0.0609532621216872,0.0,0.0,0.1174377272425276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228481021367478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177124259266503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822383956461056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751555192560158,0.08435208970242332,0.2360322227435889,0.13012904504065273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23067318831195704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612593771040572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838094910304567,0.0,0.0,0.12529678554449392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594726387294076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09694027097023047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467254121065054,0.0,0.0,0.10597930431256077,0.0,0.0753006426225444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13083524040212716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20015813568090773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878731630831078,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hermitwaiter,2020/01/04,"I Just Don't Belong - but does anyone? I dont know if this is the right space, but that's how I feel:

I mean, I have an amazing family, a wife I know loves me, a daughter who's my Player 2, friends who include me, a decent job....

But, I just don't fit.

When I'm at home, I'm alright, but I always feel like something's wrong - like I'M wrong. When I go out with friends, I'm leaving before I get there, to the point where I feel they're giving up on me.

I....I write, I want to be published, but this feeling is invading that too. Sometimes, I feel worthless, or that I'm not wanted, and I know I'm wrong.

But my question really is: does anyone ever feel like they belong? Is that normal, to belong, or are we all pretending to belong somewhere?",2.0016666666666687,3.0228186305732483,3.8679140127388543,90.63439755838642,76.07006369426752,6.252441613588111,23.274416135881104,6.42735559955562,0.4821511677282375,563,16,127,4,12,191,86,157,0.113,0.653,0.23399999999999999,0.961,1,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,1,0,1,0,9,12,0,0,6,1,10,1,0,1,2,34,32,13,0,4,12,2,6,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,8,4,0,0,11,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,0,6,21,8,9,31,1,13,0,1,0,1,12,9,0,4,6,75,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471366923633182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927950541125444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731188197142205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412909622175569,0.0,0.16157526740066014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470563863623152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12996565717448869,0.0,0.4182482720978933,0.1969797556819651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130263550473084,0.0,0.07202810996671033,0.13225145422017184,0.07835113608882792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13828856413344376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680848150068445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272989053321219,0.0,0.0,0.14597778646436754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20205976738268328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244274008836503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15017402052031412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13507718632891744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032578843962336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544389316782988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831903705964687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177348740371068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061342364717823,0.1363507563272926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263120237326592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4521970468980436,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ogfmc,2020/01/04,"When is it ok to check on a stranger? I'll try to keep this as short as possible. The other day I went to the movies and when I buying tickets I noticed the girl on the counter had some cut mark on her left arm. I was with a friend and we ended chatting for a minute because there was nobody there and she seemed just like a regular nice person. About 3 yrs ago I was in a terrible space for quite some time and although I never had any serious suicidal thoughts or anything I know at leas to some extent how it feels to be in that depression swamp. Plus, I have seen friends struggling with similar post-graduation/college depression recently and a teacher in my department recently took her own life. So I've been trying to be as aware as possible about these issues because being depressed sucks and if I feel like talking to someone may help them at least talk to a friend about it maybe I should do.

To my question, when is it ok to check on someone and ask if everything is ok? Not in bad way but just from a positive standpoint. For the girl at the movie theater I went home and I was wondering if I should have said anything but: 1) I don't know her (not necessarily and issue); 2) maybe she went through a rough time and me talking would just make her feel exposed about her condition; 3) maybe she had a rough period but not she's fine and me saying anything would just bring memories of worst times. Again, I don't feel any sort of social justice impulse towards helping everyone but we all know how positive comments can boost your spirits, especially if you're in a bad place",5.355383386581469,5.9783227092651785,5.706471246006391,82.02437140575083,67.91373801916933,9.19929712460064,32.90239616613419,9.255337874911486,2.7893796805111832,1260,54,250,23,20,403,172,313,0.081,0.777,0.14300000000000002,0.958,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,2,1,1,1,17,21,2,1,17,3,25,2,1,3,2,58,46,32,1,8,16,0,6,2,3,5,1,2,1,3,8,16,0,1,11,2,3,6,6,11,0,0,15,9,32,10,41,23,8,38,1,3,1,0,31,17,1,13,16,168,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649853618208211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271511461006266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408993913280466,0.0,0.091223868042192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629499844004422,0.11896738600535192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293084830478947,0.0,0.25213581545721203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642667074844321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324160633041267,0.08769836241290956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19735695811950804,0.06971097309772782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261695541411859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308112619106864,0.0,0.09788041761605797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036957561154877,0.0,0.08673334068428731,0.0,0.0,0.16088179031284355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602065377702607,0.0,0.06892344362509742,0.0953450467325496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513522234417411,0.0,0.2940958399240716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525949742522642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109516057547472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520284967388272,0.10195004100259283,0.0,0.0,0.22001295050721184,0.09345440042239234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931162112770784,0.1037880459754911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19269640730197948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282066142455997,0.07759931172427195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888329143301646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947023836532927,0.16535796406776276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201151256139997,0.0,0.106736378349945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352926535554023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746739973351073,0.17069856233910471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084146618822067,0.13250045226058774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745424158759541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713721405026935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582104634577223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13863567002446398,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seeking-advice-help,2020/01/04,"Need advice on how to approach someone in deep denial of paranoid schizophrenia and how to get them help. I’ll try to summarize as much as I can.
My sister-in-law is 34, and is a paranoid schizophrenic. 

She has been hospitalized in the past, and is adamant that she is NOT schizophrenic, and insists her hallucinations and delusions are real, and that the Government is using mind control testing on her and sending her secrete messages and that the hospitals are “in on it”. 
She also says god talks to her and she is being followed around by a ghost. 

She is a recovering heroin addict and bulimic. She has abused drugs for about 10 years and just recently became sober. That’s when her mental health really became noticeable.

There is a history of mental illness in the family, but she refuses to believe she is afflicted. 

She is currently living with her mom, and no one seems to know what to do. 

The parents (divorced, living in different states) can’t afford to keep her hospitalized and insure she takes the meds. 
She was released because she was able to fake being well. 

We live in Ohio, is there a program to insure she gets the help she needs without costing the family? 

What advice can I give the family on how to approach her and handle the situation? 

She gets very defensive and agitated very easily.  I fear for her safety and those around her.",6.2184883993438005,7.495033928286856,6.763454417623624,72.86954066088589,66.29083665338646,9.889946097961099,32.29458636044059,10.056822442137396,3.436527349425826,1080,44,181,25,17,353,138,251,0.113,0.818,0.069,-0.8999,5,0,1,0,2,0,28.0,1,0,1,1,12,4,1,1,15,0,24,6,0,5,0,39,36,24,1,2,4,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,8,20,0,4,3,0,1,4,4,3,1,1,3,1,31,1,33,31,1,23,0,0,0,0,39,13,0,1,5,141,39,3,0.12128703617438355,0.14370530486371966,0.0,0.1322207720690126,0.0,0.23704057605240414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699319900885528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159423530802456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393545150633482,0.0,0.0,0.13664895611153424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603372431558847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671913817248964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065445587678568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430158703062515,0.13648163549941192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901024113899167,0.11634957689295455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12892244781586476,0.0,0.0,0.1625922874533854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780549055447952,0.0,0.0,0.0666561831514197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212960250704763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472255498467045,0.0,0.2444576108968463,0.0,0.12246533148866863,0.14204991088747196,0.0,0.0,0.0891599270534165,0.17986560100170065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808609456959875,0.0,0.0,0.08218723464493015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467490031863413,0.0,0.11578219994265375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805120027790033,0.07769958110536787,0.0,0.11975631604513462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645231927104403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104151625106534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13633171038761602,0.0,0.0,0.1027661121592462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119275684524393,0.09748592540569442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234593607225606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475305726454748,0.0,0.20014901409972585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905161150824656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691637473412665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810487474462026
mentalhealth,wolfmother40,2020/01/04,"Reasons to Stay Alive Things that happened after I didn’t successfully kill myself at 19. These things can happen to you too. 

24-masters degree
25 -married, to a better man than my ex
29- a baby girl
32-a baby boy
40- a doctoral degree on how help low-income children with mental health issues

See your future. You can live with- but not be defeated by depression. Because if you can trust me, your depth and feeling will give you the strength you need to help someone who feels like you do now, one day.",3.626458333333332,6.047264562500002,4.057500000000001,84.97083333333337,75.25,6.3500000000000005,24.20833333333333,7.3871296695380915,1.2201333333333335,402,13,72,5,9,126,79,96,0.069,0.6829999999999999,0.248,0.9547,1,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,8,0,4,3,8,1,0,4,0,7,2,0,2,0,11,14,4,1,2,3,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,4,5,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,3,12,5,11,11,0,8,0,2,1,0,17,3,0,1,5,47,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841232024167107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18630575978475197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585397673999675,0.0,0.1814354122085743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21561261861422693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21302531524752708,0.15049078747315225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020778777104091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37256010397126615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22391464876430076,0.0,0.0,0.2823929855016987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21986735646183425,0.0,0.0,0.2330567087163463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291458092494747,0.0,0.1860107576863445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21228901951934392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619678169079726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274415425863562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21658671675754215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16786343780440244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784858905399926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22452843105691994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798974363036649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lavender_snow,2020/01/04,"I fucked up really bad today. I am having a tough time with life in general and I let my anxiety get the better of me today.
I made people uncomfortable and affected what could've been an amazing day.
All because I let my thoughts take over and I didn't control my emotions well, so I couldn't be my normal self. It showed very well through my abnormal behavior, and eyes that showed all my anxiety.
I feel horrible, I'm completely lost, and I don't know what to do.
I left early for my own good and others', I do not know if that made things better or worse.",3.7913157894736855,4.713902122807016,5.286798245614037,82.5396710526316,71.63157894736842,9.208771929824564,27.407894736842106,9.516144504307137,2.301284210526316,438,15,91,10,8,148,76,114,0.213,0.652,0.134,-0.831,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,4,3,10,1,0,3,0,11,3,1,4,2,23,22,9,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,7,0,1,4,2,0,0,4,4,2,0,6,2,19,6,8,12,3,9,0,1,1,1,1,4,1,2,5,63,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462374200030638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437823266499865,0.09810757046093034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846768194977031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16874259722081486,0.0,0.18050796906556904,0.1284975469135473,0.0,0.0,0.10379302835065242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810359123444208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137613309328944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878649769216584,0.08408454194503719,0.0,0.0,0.13498889163725214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689690268880767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748618526471711,0.3291442430799559,0.11367672820103845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17568509368141758,0.0,0.0,0.3045707636934336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157687093899046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157557754189144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310232740550064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16789558859471646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100690041711178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692142857599618,0.0,0.0,0.12776843524894388,0.09384544674851668,0.0,0.30510472873917843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279240948296742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894088949739253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640116767802891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brishley,2020/01/04,"Is Borderline Personality Disorder an Anxiety disorder? My psychiatrist recommended I apply for a medical marijuana card in Pennsylvania for my anxiety. I have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, and one of my symptoms is anxiety. I am on Wellbutrin and Lamotrigine in effort to combat my BTD and help with anxiety. However, I don’t think I was ever diagnosed with an anxiety disorder, it is just one of the symptoms I have from my BPD. Could BPD be considered an anxiety disorder?",8.150509803921569,10.195617482352947,10.897352941176472,42.16642156862747,62.41176470588235,17.43137254901961,47.107843137254896,14.790194502661405,9.418372549019603,406,28,53,25,6,151,49,85,0.313,0.6409999999999999,0.046,-0.9674,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,0,11,5,0,0,1,10,12,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,11,0,12,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,47,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5233846471874636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28722745085523776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104173153287684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23147115487069225,0.0,0.0,0.6534273374807155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10314446005019964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643027270763078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487077465678533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15453605716197233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991289416805216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370365992257469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306425892940202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scwekr12345,2020/01/04,Friends So i have some friends that i hangout with time to time. And then in the past few days they all hangout and dont tell me anything abt it and i feel like shit. Advice?,-0.41756756756756985,1.8133402162162184,0.3716756756756752,105.57805405405406,92.78378378378378,2.9600000000000004,20.913513513513514,3.1291,-0.8015037837837841,136,5,33,0,5,41,30,37,0.087,0.698,0.21600000000000005,0.6557,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,7,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,5,3,3,3,3,6,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,1,6,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959427383635306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492207757782872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195314003266384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3549394117989469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531306926616765,0.21635699492511345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4679642520452751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479578241084782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891057883457691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108724580652494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647053429374189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35319000098641673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BoredThinker0607,2020/01/04,"When Human Mind is Most Vulnerable to Exploitation? Just be Extra Cautios in this Situations. Under pressure brain loses its rational thinking and usually end up losing ethics and morality. SURVIVAL becomes their primary objective, the methods of survival becomes no concern. In this situation people usually loses belief in Hope and finds Shortcut to restore which makes them vulnerable and they can be manipulated (usually with some sweet talks and words which the victim wants to hear and satisfy him).  


Under these circumstances brain loses it's logical reasoning and ethics :  


**1. Under Terror or Anxiety** \- Blackmail, threat of death, threat on family and loved ones (losing someone/something precious - reason to live)  
Under some trauma or shock a person is vulnerable too.   


**2. Under ‎Extreme Happiness and Getting Depended on the Cause/Stimulator** \- Love and drug are a lot similar in this way, when someone gets depended on someone and makes him/her their reason to live the can do anything in order to protect ""The Reason to Live"".  


**3. ‎Extreme Boredom or Depression or Extreme Sadness** \- humans can get bored on their regular life and if someone always tries to protect his Morality and maintain his Good Image but usually ends up turning quiet opposite, he may get eventually bored of his fake image and finally revealing his dark side.   
Extreme sadness can lead someone to self harm as they feel that they have lost their ""Purpose of life or reason to live"" and they can never find any other reason to live. This feeling of hollowness can lead people to Suicide.  


**4. Anger** \- People makes irrational decision in high temper. At this situation some negative emotions rules (hatred, ego, self respect, boredom, frustration etc.)  


**5. ‎False Hopes** \- False hopes can sometime make someone vulnerable it makes them Overconfident. And they can do something without thinking about about the whole picture ie. the negative impacts of his actions.  


   *In these situations Despair rules and it becomes so hard for Hope to penetrate mind.*",5.307378246753245,8.936446193452381,5.6500865800865805,68.1555194805195,79.625,8.292640692640694,34.71969696969697,8.841846274778883,4.414419047619047,1635,91,209,44,44,520,188,336,0.223,0.6890000000000001,0.08800000000000001,-0.9943,0,0,4,0,0,1,77.0,0,0,11,10,7,35,6,2,9,0,17,7,2,16,1,68,40,28,2,6,9,0,3,0,0,1,3,2,0,5,15,18,0,2,16,0,0,3,5,24,0,1,1,6,17,11,44,36,8,36,3,10,0,2,27,21,0,18,10,144,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05276632252608282,0.0,0.0,0.043124343909702885,0.0,0.04851226690865637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05218510456171306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21011050621419414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158412446115673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054619207715098594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354121474483052,0.0,0.0,0.07133328882015891,0.11233365493530394,0.0,0.07072443767721262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978197567418925,0.0,0.06412901318681591,0.0,0.0,0.06946798337227726,0.11592023980266405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252678627574968,0.0,0.0,0.05318945545099188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750639866580511,0.05680734360572452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147326300803211,0.0,0.0,0.06700138155309564,0.0,0.25194143566864896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958371606919767,0.0,0.0,0.2799828348733234,0.0,0.0,0.3547255679660553,0.0692249143646744,0.053913126898530166,0.11446894532826014,0.0,0.21164987403719213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806205371402626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04890952261123668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04297161461846115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13189183507849558,0.05537149257217523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3912068121733196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231125645470948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851242650692434,0.0,0.0,0.2686564274015935,0.0976398608816514,0.06271901189228593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936566797479438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05097053861655832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126748500660791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04305459169639681,0.0689772608464818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793704544108781,0.0,0.03740378341291215,0.050335839460374766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708005324446601,0.0,0.06112975353615206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Piss_pizza546,2020/01/04,"I make everyone hate me. Yes. I make everyone hate myself even people who I want to be friends with everything I did will cause trouble. My record for longest time that I have friends is 4 months. I don't know what I did wrong.
And then I realized. 
WHAT I DID WRONG IS "" BE MYSELF ""
yes. I try to be myself at the best and then everything is ruin by me. 
Rigth now.
I also hate myself. I just feel like want to die anytime
What I always said is ""can someone just fucking kill me or I want to die"" i always say this word and it's going to kill me soon. Please I need help.

If you want my information. Here's

Boy 
16 almost 17 year olds
181 cm height 
125 kilogram
Coomer
Asian
Has only 1 friends 

I spend time a lot on facebook because ""it's my last stand and chance...but it's collapsing rigth now.""

If I can say something positive rigth now is
"" At least I got my life achievement 
  Ruined my own life and happiness by myself ""

Please 
I need help.",0.1474093264248708,2.484635512953372,1.8498155440414519,95.55049533678759,90.24352331606218,4.953284974093265,19.11896373056995,6.55674776486733,0.08568037305699505,726,22,160,9,25,236,109,193,0.21100000000000002,0.594,0.19399999999999998,-0.8961,0,0,1,0,0,4,26.0,0,1,0,2,9,17,6,0,2,2,17,3,0,3,0,27,34,11,4,8,5,0,1,1,3,1,2,3,0,1,9,6,0,0,4,0,1,1,1,11,0,0,5,4,35,6,12,25,4,18,0,2,0,1,12,4,1,5,13,98,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148837224060599,0.0,0.0,0.09174810213447376,0.19092611042379745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993724740991712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040017041569928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785746736365856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23813952201341326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577689576128406,0.0,0.0,0.21925542822416244,0.2062206214815988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801002640947224,0.08196185083031984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265916174099197,0.10606437455808737,0.0,0.0,0.06520268142546555,0.0,0.09175862420539264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12213030498391655,0.0,0.3398110433149493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15379979161414173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25385951546332697,0.0,0.06305161972348497,0.09351879765296517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207184476374278,0.05605040462387275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09753781509439903,0.0,0.0,0.15316393217144525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157495670989776,0.0,0.0,0.17013901696010572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038794922234293,0.0,0.0,0.08725596789521378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795380900249607,0.0,0.0,0.2518742283493738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913279312549687,0.18247294305199055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720883371924348,0.08832337544102828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379787506121016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778929185790277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706786654928031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508745583216768,0.0,0.0738812009346703
mentalhealth,nailmail,2020/01/04,"How to get good grades when depressed? I am feeling extremely tired and depressed for the last one year. 
Here is the list of the things I have tried 
1. Talking to a councillor - she left the city and left on a weird note it's hard to just go to another therapist now 
2. Talking to my friends. Nope. Tried tested failed. 
3. Family - no luck here as well. 
4. Maintaining a journal and venting my feelings 
5. Doing art and theater . I played hamlet in hamlet and Othello in Othello. 
6. Wrote poems. 
7. Including exercise in my life - I used to do nothing I have now lost weight and I jumped rope 30 minutes everyday without fail 
8. ""went outside to parties""  when I didn't feel good I couldn't just forget. 
9. Decided to let go and not over think. I couldnt just do it even as I became successful of not consciously.  

Now I have exams in one month I don't know what to do,  maybe I'll  get better sooner but now I need to get good grades otherwise I'll ruin my life.  How to be productive and do boring tasks when depressed?",0.2364860426929383,2.6509407684729065,2.2785566502463084,90.77865599343187,94.51724137931036,5.859376026272577,22.0376026272578,7.3011,1.184810311986864,788,31,160,16,30,262,123,203,0.111,0.748,0.141,-0.1069,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,5,16,18,0,0,7,0,16,5,0,3,0,31,31,16,0,3,7,0,5,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,4,8,1,0,7,3,0,4,9,9,1,2,4,5,18,9,23,23,0,23,0,7,0,0,5,8,0,1,11,99,22,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579453226192288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296871156814605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592623045777117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183395935869967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310736109840522,0.0,0.21090691380919785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10742119956094984,0.0,0.21792644312992365,0.0,0.15803815492699938,0.34985799215967955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455164910230447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764122075075168,0.11333535606937264,0.0,0.0,0.3021325973836817,0.14217681496874182,0.19641473902692408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517775114240186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13968338059687527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097961678535943,0.0,0.0,0.10309566927935808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13341168662503528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18843287242808826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22350859017056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614350150600116,0.09237134470038497,0.0890905878843965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15980489646864096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887967314378073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008506893594773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16931206526316409,0.12501277411381095,0.1288905616448464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402865067920405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953656831470429
mentalhealth,ice__cube100,2020/01/04,"Why does it feel like I’m in a living hell I already know 2020 is going to be a horrible year for me, I’m already sick, world is going to end soon, I just can’t do it anymore.. it feels like I’m in a living nightmare..",0.4572000000000003,1.3533189199999995,3.4450000000000003,92.6275,79.8,5.8000000000000025,22.5,5.985473137389443,0.2176,166,5,41,1,4,60,33,50,0.218,0.687,0.095,-0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,3,0,5,1,0,0,0,4,13,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,2,5,12,0,8,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,5,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5296246624333972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379852809170803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20999894302856476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21254176693069612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24267159796585835,0.3428685443588299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727604152683657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188097178779526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23447397111488197,0.0,0.4237949630928599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21653516584668075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545325023979438
mentalhealth,SpiritOfCharizard,2020/01/04,"I feel like I'm slowly going crazy. Please help! It all started when my sister and I went hiking in the woods together. There's an old plantation-turned-nature reserve near our house in Durham, NC, and one of the trails is said to be haunted. We hike on that trail all the time, and it always feels weird, but one day, things took a strange turn. It started to downpour while we were stuck on the trail, and during the rain, it sounded like people I knew were calling my name over and over again. However, it sounded like they were coming from all directions at once, and whenever I would ask my sister if she was calling me, she said that she wasn't.

Ever since then, I've been hearing the same voices in my head, everywhere. They don't talk with me, or carry on conversations... they just yell or scream my name. I never know if it's my mom, dad, or sister calling me to help them around the house, or if it's just the voices I'm hearing. I know if the voices are fake sometimes, because they don't come from any direction. I'm paranoid all the time, and constantly feel as if I'm being watched. It's not something paranormal, because it's all in my head.

Lately, ever since the voices began, I've become more angry and depressed. These swirling emotions only amplify the voices, and every time I ignore them, they grow deeper. Like, not louder, but they grow... darker? Distorted? I don't know how to put it.

I see myself growing more detached from reality, living in my own universes and illusions. I guess you could say that I'm too caught up in my imagination, but I'm not having delusions such as ""my family is out to kill me, so I have to get out"" kind of things. It's more like I'm living in the universes I create for myself, based on the obsessions I have, to get away from my own head.

I also have the Call of the Void. For those of you who don't know what that is, it's a phenomena where you, for a split second, see every way that you can die. For example, as I'm driving, I know that I can hit a tree, go into oncoming traffic, hit a deer, or get hit by someone else. I never act on the urges, but I can see them in my head.

Also, I've had my first hallucination. Or was it a hallucination? I don't know. It only lasted for a split second, but I remember it vividly. I was home alone, talking on the phone with my friend, when I saw this person out of the corner of my eye. He was about my height (5'3""), wearing a suit, but he had no face. No, I'm not talking about Slenderman. He had a torn-up suit and a crumpled hat, but no face. I saw him down my hallway, walking into our dining room (with no mirrors, I should point out), and as soon as he disappeared behind the corner, he was gone. No trace whatsoever. I haven't had a single hallucination before or since then, but it flipped me the hell out.

Please help me to understand what's happening. I'm only 18 years old, and am worried that I'm slowly going insane. I've tried researching my symptoms, which turned up nothing (go figure). I've tried reasoning with myself that it's normal, that I'm just imagining it all, but that hasn't worked either. I don't want to go to a psychologist just yet, because the last thing I need right now is to wind up in an institution. My parents say that they experienced the same things when they were my age, but I feel as if they don't really understand, and this question is the first time that I've gone in-depth about my issues. I'm sick of feeling like this... I just want it to stop!!!",4.1534286661442925,4.791142457507085,5.327504671207283,83.62154873123984,70.60056657223797,8.2181423663432,26.49436441444157,8.332992426153591,1.5812316677716831,2709,81,564,39,47,901,292,706,0.134,0.807,0.059000000000000004,-0.9951,2,1,1,0,0,1,126.0,4,4,12,3,26,16,2,1,38,0,43,11,8,2,10,108,109,53,2,13,33,6,5,6,1,2,2,15,2,1,44,30,1,2,20,0,0,20,21,8,0,6,27,29,83,8,75,74,15,93,1,1,8,0,60,39,1,15,39,377,127,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911319409990307,0.0,0.10672951799426306,0.05552554021276765,0.0,0.0,0.04537937034978717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0594047404723124,0.062384479790259975,0.0,0.06269597397734361,0.0,0.0,0.1220358001787149,0.07369915003491327,0.0567831685901353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725592601828261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496570065105112,0.0,0.07211250762970581,0.0,0.053279275951633495,0.0,0.0,0.0430359764227305,0.0,0.057475315109842974,0.0,0.06925624565678536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05574519027882294,0.0750633966377861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207240252875092,0.1124474962394568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290805072980163,0.0,0.16870600081849185,0.09534528376637466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352271413998695,0.0,0.0,0.0515562073914221,0.0,0.10459258455502908,0.0,0.1896238341332024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351172313432737,0.0,0.05901000557842712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739410439286915,0.0,0.15042138050566242,0.0,0.13418515406348355,0.0,0.06693663693154278,0.0,0.0,0.1539972359930747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964982988263024,0.0,0.0,0.07382796780893179,0.06949007079057103,0.2200416845238448,0.10878934784149193,0.0752754779921682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956083841425282,0.0,0.11784939645137325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07815454421069122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04948019318578023,0.10293412671292697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653822146154345,0.06403019713233701,0.0,0.14004592459019996,0.0710663403403558,0.09043730930179904,0.1522558044077487,0.0,0.0,0.07409688175982806,0.0,0.0,0.046262875269649034,0.058266937892772715,0.0,0.14650120471976888,0.06308236720993195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708308925085309,0.07475399547767501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04274958927261974,0.06861058512621364,0.0,0.0,0.075593217977715,0.05698791195776722,0.12695293021516746,0.10613434395835784,0.0,0.0,0.15952790911850911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656017258048611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056540962299322386,0.05137278629824242,0.06599866828333059,0.0,0.09446509478485993,0.0,0.0,0.05579010653212733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935906297116456,0.0,0.16090755747974445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17733245295573113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15564553796447306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414059969513956,0.09061194141020024,0.14516833796801695,0.0,0.1389386550553904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07871934903087831,0.052967964116106485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061860308338748365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04858096495303628,0.06776857275571277,0.0,0.04740378993165584,0.0,0.0,0.04297257807598728
mentalhealth,ezitherese,2020/01/04,"[ADVICE] What to do if a loved one is showing symptoms of a mental illness/personality disorder **Background**: I've been worried for my brother for a long time now. It all started, in summer 2016, when my family and I were getting ready to travel out of the country and on the day we were travelling, my 18-year old brother jumped out of a window. We found out where he was because we called his friend's mom. She had told us that he was in the hospital. The reason why he jumped out of the window is that he wanted to escape from my family, most specifically my dad. After this incident, there has been an ongoing conflict between my brother and father. My brother most commonly accused my father of not treating him like a man, only being focused on his work and not his family. He also claimed that my father verbally abused him. 

As soon as we think everything is resolved between my father and brother, my now 19-year old brother runs away again. This time to a shelter for disadvantaged youth. We know that he's in the shelter because we received a call from the director, telling us that he's in the shelter. Once we picked my brother up, he claimed that he knew that he didn't belong there. He said that his life wasn't as hard as the people who were in the shelter.

**Present day**: My brother is now 21-years old who is supposed to have senior standing. On December 30, my brother sat my father and mother down to tell them that he wouldn't be graduating on time. He also told them that he had been editing his grades to make them look good, even though he has been failing this whole time. Although he was failing out of his major, he continued studying it. The reason why he continued to study his major is that he thought that he would eventually like it. He came up with the solution to choose 4 courses from 4 completely different majors. Meaning that whichever course he likes best, he will pursue the courses in that major. 

My parents, sister, and I have been trying to explain to him how this is not fair because he is essentially repeating undergrad all over again. Meaning that my parents will have to fork over thousands of dollars when all of this could have been prevented if he had spoken up about failing his courses as early as Sophomore year of school. If he had spoken up earlier, we could have found him a major that was more suitable for his interests. The issue with my brother is that he is incapable of hearing anyone elses's side and he thinks that he is always right. Even when someone makes a valid point, he ignores the person speaking and interrupts what they're saying. I have observed that my brother has this, 'I'm always right and everyone else is wrong' idea. He seems to lack concern and remorse for having to redo undergrad all over again. He acts as if money is easy to come by and he acts as if it is no big deal that my parents have to spend money on his education. Additionally, he explicitly said that the only reason he's living in my family's house is for education purposes and if education were not in the equation, he'd be living somewhere else. That sounds like exploitation to me. 

Unfortunately, this is only a summary of all the events that have occurred. Alas, what should I do? I heard that it is hard to get someone with these symptoms to get help.",5.741190476190474,6.8071943535031885,6.156396724294815,77.5561040339703,67.2484076433121,8.719805884137093,33.26448286320898,8.909455092898707,2.8933661207158026,2626,115,467,43,42,847,265,628,0.085,0.86,0.055,-0.953,4,0,0,0,1,0,71.0,10,0,3,6,20,16,0,0,29,0,62,4,0,7,6,81,92,35,0,13,10,23,2,4,1,5,3,7,2,2,42,32,0,3,17,3,4,10,8,5,0,2,31,10,56,11,82,50,16,77,0,3,1,1,109,33,0,9,37,327,98,12,0.0,0.08722634005505342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193952204200342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774599090544526,0.12251361902082047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051476035868012,0.0754312471959452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916736550933493,0.0,0.0,0.1346321663211678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772584775105348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15034622461429545,0.08420039173906935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634161504600088,0.07718799989223972,0.0,0.0,0.11755737793151007,0.0,0.0,0.09495618051512536,0.07589783747447176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691606547301114,0.08437361984406183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18449739465549025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972491579833833,0.0,0.0,0.0703459991461539,0.0661639065457135,0.0,0.277605330120901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614386143055356,0.05687776765707815,0.0,0.11538848615858492,0.0,0.0,0.061748027615782734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13189612083836907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297383345231765,0.0,0.049345186557961634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494630861950928,0.0,0.08310675984260775,0.0,0.07683898878252977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04045901370065237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199919539373762,0.14386587361591313,0.0,0.13001364780380145,0.06515039625950235,0.06182132171179415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644391766514246,0.0,0.09828235432090153,0.0,0.0,0.16038509498764736,0.0,0.0,0.07419052037555493,0.0,0.0,0.0862215479352761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23175190621626415,0.07840170948629785,0.04988606150706571,0.1679714374992274,0.0,0.0,0.24523517757149996,0.0,0.0,0.051038065130704,0.12856234091827032,0.0,0.0,0.06959364171581715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270774238685123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257402504799142,0.14005683570442273,0.05854469191525785,0.0,0.07450624158526817,0.0,0.06701986764873942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475408411455564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05210782546595037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303641862698053,0.0,0.0,0.12869230012659227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434401736029913,0.07233018038007971,0.05844517109880415,0.17171105465521802,0.0,0.0,0.1406919982923078,0.0,0.04998239020335343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17710890754715608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0434223255630677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13285918541395894,0.08219285562404584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0535954248181411,0.07476355090255417,0.0,0.05229674342271843,0.08049069347302737,0.0,0.18963259208537644
mentalhealth,tal379,2020/01/04,"how do i convince my parents to let me see a therapist? when i was 14F i self harmed and my parents made me go to the doctor who then referred me to a therapist. at the time i didn’t feel comfortable talking to anyone about my feelings and i lied to the therapist and convinced her and my parents that i didn’t need to see her anymore as i was fine. i only had to see her a total of three times before i got out of it which was what i wanted at the time. i’m now 17F and i’ve came to the conclusion that i want to see a therapist properly this time. i won’t go into detail, but i think this is something that will help me and i’m willing to talk this time around. i just don’t know how to bring the idea up to my parents because although i’ve seen someone before, they didn’t react well to it and it wasn’t something i willingly wanted to do. i guess i could say they aren’t very understanding and if i tell them i want to see a therapist they’ll think something is really wrong with me and demand me to tell them how i’m feeling and why, when i don’t want to talk to them about it. does anyone have any advice?",3.162785269709545,3.534106551867218,4.777321058091285,87.63950855809132,72.69294605809128,7.850726141078838,26.68075726141079,7.865858978985527,1.3469769709543566,873,28,198,11,16,296,110,241,0.047,0.865,0.08900000000000001,0.6212,5,0,3,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,6,1,11,7,0,0,11,0,23,1,0,5,1,42,52,20,0,8,3,4,3,0,0,5,1,1,0,1,13,15,0,0,10,0,0,4,8,2,1,1,12,10,40,5,30,33,1,19,0,0,6,0,22,6,0,2,9,140,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848935142626549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05907816676858345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615692972126288,0.12149042587729468,0.0,0.0,0.0773374142791329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05295836190999845,0.0,0.14784892244025316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993621719205788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936283879035232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892052621933144,0.07602513948060309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178024958553508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874644279873382,0.0,0.0694820944346126,0.0,0.09570291093287717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058230666258886114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980716121230568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04774437971166745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883585570270737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220348671922723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441691637056751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607256215729597,0.0,0.0,0.38585885206401177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055654526382121115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908670640331471,0.0,0.0,0.3461417360098926,0.0,0.09062985967461176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360913944437805,0.2006424954489435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20948116824539315,0.15186564083525392,0.0,0.0,0.5043444568085366,0.0,0.11133233799769164,0.0,0.0,0.2532883603764611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09044022615006976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168120102515696,0.25620644326449804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811130643636431,0.0,0.07839142401640659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498447641025136,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hoplocampa,2020/01/04,"Did hormonal birth control changed how you responded to your antidepressants/antipsychotics? I have OCD and some mild depression that I have very successfully kept under control for the last three years with a combo of small dose of an antidepressant, mild antipsychotic and regular CBT, plus SAD lamp in winter. Pretty much have found my sweet spot treatment wise. However I'm in a relationship now and at that point where condoms are not the method we would prefer for birth control anymore. However I'm kind of worried that moving to hormonal birth control would kick me off balance and require significant psych meds adjustments. I am terrified of meds adjustments as it usually is a very stressful process and I have limited access to my psychiatrist (not financially, she simply is so busy that I have to make appointments months in advance). How likely is hormonal birth control to actually do that?",9.728336917562725,10.628640658064525,8.940860215053764,61.635734767025106,58.54838709677418,13.082437275985663,42.38351254480287,12.45797560212912,5.964555555555558,742,39,109,24,9,234,103,155,0.11900000000000001,0.794,0.087,-0.742,2,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,1,2,0,9,5,8,0,1,6,0,14,2,0,8,0,28,19,10,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,8,0,8,4,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,3,1,12,5,20,14,2,21,0,2,0,1,6,9,0,1,11,73,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.12822737689809785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031342222955938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900370280733695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7368809726333377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317456706607032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407324087085482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683280660720748,0.0,0.10710848056970848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419536847403022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877104735341154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919114002126196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048821704041977,0.13965733045520626,0.09659406753375233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12421540595023667,0.0,0.0,0.1336809678185724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107434964340626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051817572701634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471845872391828,0.216837406934846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334430071006223,0.0,0.18668548028151036,0.0,0.0,0.08461724672875919
mentalhealth,Jacek310,2020/01/04,Nothing helps Nothing helps right now and I must admit I feel helpless,2.8338461538461535,5.880488153846155,2.3757692307692326,89.60673076923081,90.53846153846158,2.6,29.57692307692308,3.1291,0.9410307692307692,58,3,9,0,2,17,10,13,0.456,0.433,0.111,-0.6776,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,5,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19886312500842387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5272382910178864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7547594652748278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33587407100649874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cottonnap,2020/01/04,"Im so scared of myself (19. M) Recently I’ve been so so scared of myself. Not because I see myself as a potential bad person or afraid of being in rage or doing bad things. But because how self destructive I can be. I don’t know if it’s meds for adhd I take or what but most of the time I feel that I will collapse in the future and go crazy or feel like I’m developing mental issues. I have good moments too where I feel like the person I want to be and have the mindset I like to have but then it all crumbles and it’s just me picking myself up and not knowing what’s wrong and everything is just so confusing and I don’t know what’s going on and being very self aware all the time 

Meditation and mindfulness are also harder to do lately. (I used to do because it used to help me study and I believe I have a strong will to try everything to feel better and have a healthy mind) 

I want to see a psychiatrist or psychologist but I don’t know if they’ll understand or if I would be able to explain myself. I’m also scared of being misunderstood and diagnosed with something I actually don’t have. And also scared of all this things I think, I’m confused and scared about being just a justification I made up for myself to try to make sense for why I feel “wrong” . 

What’s the issue? Not trusting myself? , not wanting to listen to myself, ocd?... god..

Note: I have not ever done physical self harm and don’t feel the need too.",1.70392493946731,3.6944822,3.758928571428573,86.8781991525424,79.54237288135593,6.519370460048427,21.722154963680392,7.5804360353943165,0.8587070217917678,1119,33,234,17,28,381,131,295,0.163,0.715,0.12300000000000001,-0.9129,0,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,2,16,22,2,8,12,0,31,1,0,7,4,70,61,37,0,8,21,0,6,3,0,4,1,1,0,5,12,15,0,0,14,0,0,2,10,15,0,0,3,9,33,7,30,47,4,16,0,0,2,0,9,6,0,12,11,169,45,0,0.09087720415784112,0.0,0.08868304206375208,0.0,0.10921673928049924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21802340199598805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15175733905688749,0.1661937004887201,0.0,0.0,0.10238748900293908,0.0,0.08037350201994807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09223844927008937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299893174483376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220363397889369,0.0,0.0,0.1633491426022327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757014698600074,0.12984538561697134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329521877778552,0.0762234872078496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06091307433775205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981629750969976,0.1897043810038146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997749390437624,0.0,0.10251344462243836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319403469989266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599020789302035,0.060661239448414214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094408702018973,0.0,0.09158284724457157,0.0,0.18352014004121564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738429538216648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870093874691218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08973027559826889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4549196750922245,0.0,0.14483473160502672,0.0,0.2844142305552214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996171161919636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832834771909388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074955271443027,0.0582304429636699,0.0,0.0,0.10598245711910792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339931257364625,0.0,0.0,0.0946063744850528,0.0,0.15697745235527333,0.0,0.07498321086096839,0.16080518867839544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200254170756517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455655843936449,0.19871991320817745,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Do_me_no,2020/01/04,"Im losing my mind Hello reddit im 17 y o boy from non eng country 
 i think im going crazy
I cant remember anything properly, my eyesight is not clear and i feel my mind like in the fog. Also i lost 2kg in 1 week and i have some prblm with my nose but all in all my health is in a good condition. And i always want to sleep
Idk what to think

Upd. I always think that everything around me is imaginary",-1.115757575757577,0.8357930000000025,2.023131313131312,95.13045454545454,91.22222222222223,5.494949494949495,17.070707070707073,6.980632752743323,-0.0041111111111109535,310,8,75,5,11,110,62,90,0.12300000000000001,0.7909999999999999,0.086,-0.0237,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,2,0,5,3,2,0,3,19,12,5,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,2,13,2,9,11,3,7,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,1,2,40,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406438921063194,0.29267734863186995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14472676235537654,0.15656238436382525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806142123379227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892560941980457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999514832252883,0.14751216354782162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869425385076911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5699122422999504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592163627408117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967545467526567,0.19198385850658997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35515893989813513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992274413494252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759979080023406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3380729066814878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037332112037989,0.0,0.14107302451816395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elliegarcia,2020/01/04,"All I do is compare myself Every woman in the world appears to be better than me, more successful, more beautiful.  I know it doesn't matter but I hurt over it. 

I have a lot of other life issues at the moment and when I'm not ok and stressed the comparisons hit harder. 

Is there any way out of disliking yourself before I break down entirely",2.1286134453781536,4.499913794117648,3.989747899159663,83.76029411764709,80.17647058823529,6.8268907563025225,22.94957983193277,7.957251820313856,1.484228571428571,270,9,50,5,7,91,56,68,0.08800000000000001,0.725,0.187,0.7977,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,2,5,0,1,4,1,6,1,0,0,1,10,10,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,7,3,9,8,4,11,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,2,2,39,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23491499921079145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29394894423872137,0.0,0.0,0.3055187499304079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29105299706380083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3698068883296805,0.0,0.0,0.3605556799442587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18984798506392475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439985943178646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2936856776149101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3957070125432027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741988077979302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,articulatedodger,2020/01/04,"Rumination Does anyone else manage to ruminate whilst engaging in conversation or any other activity, sex etc.  It seems at times that even when talking I’m ruminating and overthinking at the same time.  Feels like my mind is split in two..Have I lost the plot? Also any advice on taking sertraline I’ve been prescribed them and going to start taking them this week.",6.222272727272731,8.23888759090909,6.721636363636367,70.38245454545456,67.03030303030303,10.128484848484847,28.35151515151515,10.355215969177356,3.2644642424242414,295,10,48,8,5,96,56,66,0.035,0.8909999999999999,0.07400000000000001,0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,2,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,7,10,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,4,2,7,8,2,12,0,1,0,1,4,5,0,2,7,27,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22501104142372044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18414181304702695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131744502618844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16100574635821702,0.23593239162111404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015053323860259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19235579059104765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568049143659954,0.15208701485842954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642825507485255,0.164500447000681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086417804713973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249522212821077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251360050207107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325007155776947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096234418532537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16298184560599605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462593203201141,0.18507725525305016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26853725278697993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22493419502501227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847036662435708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,daddymonster1,2020/01/04,"All the WW3 talk makes me unable to function, what do I do? Yesterday and today I've really not been feeling well. All the talk about WW3 including all the memes (especially all the memes) is keeping me in a constant state of anxiety and uneasiness since yesterday. I can't relax and I can't get to work because this is all I'm thinking about and war is one of my greatest fears if not the greatest. I've always been terrified of it and I've always been against it. What can I do about these feelings? I have a lot of work to do and I need myself to function.",3.0207149758454115,4.431620095652175,4.579420289855072,84.98903381642515,74.13043478260869,7.893719806763285,28.42995169082125,8.515128840125781,2.05005314009662,441,18,91,8,9,148,61,115,0.17600000000000002,0.754,0.07,-0.8694,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,4,4,1,1,7,0,14,0,0,1,5,21,22,7,1,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,3,1,0,0,4,2,1,1,3,2,10,2,13,19,8,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,4,69,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3885980241508949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17863449796473993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234551836687195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523413358437384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262763650683295,0.23613932734107995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199932842668627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20755440215926024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19852183727802206,0.0,0.0,0.15586972698729085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17314469371139468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823240786823278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959247457067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19316187108717806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3753729585098651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962376848258596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22134016042043145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209953518273356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399960976472016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mygstill,2020/01/04,"I’ve always suffered with Paranoia but now I’m getting mood swings too. I won’t go too much into the paranoia, as it isn’t really relevant here, but I’ve been noticing recently that I get really moody and quite malicious with people and like although I’m aware I’m doing it and I know it’s wrong I can’t stop myself doing it, even though I don’t want to be mean. Any ideas? Or am I just a cunt?",1.0324418604651164,2.7784433488372144,3.4211046511627927,89.68188953488372,80.62790697674419,6.625581395348838,21.21511627906977,7.645422480735847,0.7811209302325581,312,9,69,5,8,108,59,86,0.249,0.6970000000000001,0.055,-0.9493,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,1,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,0,15,18,9,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,0,7,1,5,15,1,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,4,43,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128636973208234,0.0,0.0,0.17396716029654208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16896746251665176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673119934287455,0.0,0.1453890598058968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887909493465348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14059261843878942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498129604256172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786642382053881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18805798669533175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912540845824398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773541804519928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720972917686668,0.0,0.0,0.3277711696868466,0.0,0.2525925315753709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138779434625028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25134298940217104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15088994741151668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797002773981222,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ItsAMixedBag,2020/01/04,"I feel as though I’m becoming more and more anxious around my friends I’m 17 and the friends I’m talking about are all my main ones at school.

We’re currently on school holidays for 6 weeks and we’ve all been hanging out a couple times, and have been keeping in touch. But recently I’ve just been getting increasing anxiety and worrying about stuff I message to all of them.

I’m perfectly fine in person, i feel as though nothings wrong and act like a different person when I’m with them, but as soon as I get home if I’m not in a voice call with them I feel as though I’m just saying stupid things and that I’m losing them as friends.

We use discord, which is just a social media app we use to talk, and just before New Year’s Day I told them I’d been dealing with a lot of anxiety and worrying about stuff and that I would be off it for a bit. Ever since then I’ve just had daily panic attacks where I feel as though I literally can’t breath, to the point where I have to pull an inhaler out that I haven’t used for over 5 years.

Just in general I’ve felt lately that I’ve not been talking to them as much. It’s the last year of school and I’ve just been so worried about losing contact with them. They’ve all been going through the works too and one of my other friends has stopped talking in the main group chat cause he’s just felt down. I’ve been trying to talk to him but I just feel like I can’t help anyone else right now. I can’t deal with what I’m going through and I’m just worried.

A couple of my friends have also recently gone on holidays, and I think some of them have friends visiting for a bit, but I haven’t asked and it’s just made me more worried.

I’m sorry if this post is completely jumbled I’ve just had no idea what to do. I was wondering if anyone had any advice.",3.962639251523065,4.08372418798956,4.836883159268929,88.80804884682333,70.82767624020887,8.263228894691037,27.707680591818967,8.07648339933343,1.4602568320278504,1416,45,324,18,24,461,168,383,0.139,0.7609999999999999,0.1,-0.9351,2,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,2,0,8,4,30,16,2,1,14,0,28,1,1,5,6,73,60,38,0,4,21,0,8,2,6,1,0,2,1,2,15,25,0,2,10,3,0,8,8,6,0,2,17,11,33,10,51,41,15,45,0,2,0,0,38,18,0,6,20,206,48,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098166071528098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808911249198311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04939678167020005,0.0,0.11113675662317478,0.0820610133240823,0.0,0.1015812840907528,0.07442689419964295,0.0,0.06466381028795995,0.06790734432971109,0.08263696552720266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022369626314133,0.061810152052985234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15860521331563587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741721963287744,0.0,0.0,0.07461991605748279,0.0,0.0,0.07616025606123866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16074659781886874,0.0,0.0468459283355276,0.14977454383116334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589194239811453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060680282078433234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06570582925136123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18364145259504944,0.0518930753025859,0.13948901532975194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3367227046952064,0.0,0.07590140664892,0.0,0.08256445219000673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048688164596706746,0.0,0.07286250150142014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082000208826103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456458114656932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059210205231448626,0.08193957568907788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07097516316239798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16252816710994145,0.0,0.061754793629806036,0.0,0.06873245918250452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05339777515648357,0.0,0.0,0.07015487328646512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969875614549498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844367579336127,0.0,0.0,0.08522582006015693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268505573124991,0.0,0.0,0.06866701534837426,0.0,0.06956775989453648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434438328760801,0.0,0.0,0.062033021241151114,0.0,0.05776518025492509,0.0,0.2205426145987632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060087452593087974,0.0,0.0,0.07404596924248713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131303612189479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072917474355439,0.0,0.0,0.16630778078677838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919210287496265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04825789997842245,0.04654392217726525,0.2854684700416123,0.0,0.04235618849220089,0.0,0.0,0.06940935527976277,0.0,0.049316883994332615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882094473478671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05826635389630056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877353137677802,0.052881811726680966,0.36884044078971134,0.0,0.05160042203196883,0.07941897489260825,0.0,0.1403307521014419
mentalhealth,THISistheman2004,2020/01/04,"two minds hi guys, my name is liav, and i have something to tell ya, maybe you have an opunion about that.

a lot of time, something like 2 yrs, i have this feeling of tw minds.

i will explain.

before something like 3 yrs, i have become religous of judaisem .

i started to see more and more videos of judaisem, and 1 thing that i was terifiied was that the rabbi told me that i have to direct with my heart and mind truly in peace and true purpose, and do not just 'fake it'.

so i remember, one morning  that i really was pasionate about this stuff, wanted to direct and do it perfectly.

so i was in the prayer, i tried to direct with my mind, ive try to feel this ""confirmation"" that ya, im doing it, so i try to do it with my mind to direct, and i remember that subjectively, i hd this feeling that i have been created ""another mind""

like my consciousness has expanded, and i have another mind in my brain.

in the past, i used to think that i created 'servitor' in my mind, that will help me to direct in my prayer.

subjectively, i had this feeling that i didnt know how to direct in the prayer, and i was very anxious, about this and i was very scared because the rabbi told that if we are not direct with our mind and heart in the prayer so the prayer dont worth nothing....  this is servitor 

 [https://www.tulpa.info/what-is-a-tulpa/](https://www.tulpa.info/what-is-a-tulpa/) 

now, this is can explain why i feel two minds, but i have another opinin about what happend, objectively.

when i tried to direct with my mind, i remember that i have been looking for the feeling thar confirm my direct, that i will feel that in my mind. and perhaps i didnt feel anything , and i have been looking for it in my mind, i created access to my subconcuss mind, and i have evidence for this opinion.

before 2 days, i woke up early for school, after a dream and really after 10 minuts or 5 minuts i fall asllep again and woke up from another dream.

also, before i going to bed even when im not tired and i even anxious and not calm, pictures goes up to my mind, and i feel like in this times, i think from 'under thought' that i dont really have control on her, and pictures just jumping from there to my conscious mind.

and even when i fully aware and just close my eyes, pictures jumping to me. 

any idea or opinion guys?

really. !

i feel this all the time and its make me anxious because i dont know how to control this!

i have more to say about that, but not for now.

thanks for the reading !",4.4400644141954295,5.5308186384297535,5.101847350510454,83.83948225571223,70.2603305785124,7.842877977637336,27.458434613514825,8.124751697461798,1.6382403500243066,1927,64,388,26,34,621,174,484,0.036000000000000004,0.8740000000000001,0.09,0.9492,0,0,3,0,0,0,91.0,2,3,0,3,25,10,0,1,13,0,42,5,4,6,3,97,72,39,0,2,13,0,10,4,0,3,1,1,1,2,38,31,0,2,23,4,1,4,10,2,0,3,17,15,70,8,60,52,5,36,2,0,4,0,17,17,0,6,19,284,108,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03827915006092265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03255113973967462,0.2007705119097303,0.0,0.16222794815211408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03939038781609505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835844723040159,0.0528652405925892,0.1221936427097869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05343530129878269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073736179368036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030870196557855344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16829898356164968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484692641638336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420294757390853,0.034196129557059265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027203867639700303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479153163269076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344503594446985,0.032084180302211614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054035914201901264,0.10340895206012048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052612803029799815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935414161015752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039229641952607,0.0,0.0,0.04069473453674989,0.0,0.0,0.03195153364000077,0.0,0.04808874412610716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7733109288847996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04592959043609539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032435856536480595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04569438116567282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047879862749886995,0.0,0.12265907115948042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16267163136888865,0.0,0.0,0.03806568750004042,0.04792312664355695,0.048443867688168434,0.038143729350055916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055085599827234,0.0,0.0,0.033880444761151304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479615907296489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04183778853402391,0.04406941894702339,0.0,0.0,0.031800647585276336,0.061342365376759,0.0,0.0380009791861875,0.0837347392177207,0.05501597071564168,0.0,0.0914777662252153,0.0,0.12999395735073133,0.0,0.09351803007387953,0.0,0.0,0.041341640850550185,0.0,0.07899042637587038,0.02823314328481375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043192440407732714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AbsyntheMinded_,2020/01/04,"Real-time support network https://discord.gg/BnWnkT   often times i make.posts to these reddit subforums and might not get a response for a long time, if at all.

Im looking to create a safe space for us all to communicate somewhat directly and in real time.

Im still adding to it, but please come and join and invite those you think might benefit from this type of support.",6.218676470588236,8.05064822058824,6.19929411764706,74.83982352941179,66.79411764705883,8.381176470588235,31.24705882352941,8.841846274778883,2.706125882352941,301,12,50,5,5,95,50,68,0.0,0.721,0.27899999999999997,0.9555,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,2,17,8,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,10,6,3,9,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,5,5,34,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15693642518522605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518425192902476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.393582576244478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122817632733685,0.15298969046998545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216100412436474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3865394310714957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999846495419874,0.0,0.0,0.17448306892567153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4147333049680473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454933427010482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41348323081392857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673692517393618,0.0,0.0,0.3187009801947281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21914637373360613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luna1-618,2020/01/04,My doctor refused to give me another prescription of benzos. And now I'm left without anxiolytic. What am I supposed to do ????!. My anxiety leaves me paralyzed in the morning which leads to me not attending classes. My anxiety makes me nauseous and scared. But I'm just supposed to fucking deal with it wtfff am I supposed to do. Suffer?,2.2218637992831556,5.13072577419355,4.035376344086025,78.40084229390683,89.64516129032258,7.2716845878136205,32.695340501792124,8.167268648758528,3.5406931899641587,266,16,43,7,9,89,43,62,0.19699999999999998,0.8029999999999999,0.0,-0.9053,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,1,1,0,4,2,0,2,0,10,9,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,9,0,9,9,0,5,0,1,0,1,3,2,1,0,1,32,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30264247257602594,0.4415859072189192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975537968965371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954140554269631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668238668375553,0.0,0.276869905621409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056061364280031,0.31358568424824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926556056748741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889582419852801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782186794543909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emergencyaccount777,2020/01/04,"help for getting admitted into a hospital how would one go about getting admitted into inpatient care when dealing with mood swings and anxiety. i know that the way i feel now is not going to be the same as i feel in a couple of weeks and when i get into a really low mood and depression i often become suicidal, this unpredictability and many other factors have made me want to seek permanent help in a psych ward with constant supervision. the problem is although i feel pretty stable now when i get into a state where i feel very unsafe with myself i also get incredibly anxious and often have panic attacks at the though of going to a ER and getting admitted. i also now if i went now i wouldn’t be admitted because i wouldn’t be seen as a threat to myself. so i’m just wondering if anyone has had a similar experience and how they sought help, because i really feel like this is what i need but i genuinely cannot make myself do it and i don’t know what to do.",8.1078180771445,6.308416730569952,9.219965457685669,67.1548992515832,63.04145077720207,12.515601611974668,36.470351180195735,11.429527900616536,4.175329763960852,771,29,141,19,9,269,104,193,0.1,0.7929999999999999,0.107,-0.4125,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,18,10,2,1,12,0,17,0,0,4,0,45,46,23,1,8,5,0,5,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,15,0,0,12,0,0,4,5,6,1,1,4,6,22,2,21,36,1,24,0,2,1,0,9,9,0,5,10,111,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21453793420234527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261410941325412,0.15153614439822474,0.0,0.09379140904183778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15259971371918646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16353681693742864,0.14814330372792356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676117353006406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449539800026038,0.0,0.0,0.1484195641260433,0.0,0.0,0.1382889144418887,0.11553163176430115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312113049034412,0.0,0.0,0.3391174024142404,0.0958271928871352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42048493134816206,0.0,0.22869871286771185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697267475240599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474359025297554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553235292860053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692326645287094,0.08953720250858263,0.13599342909031634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946056751217458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089441176652473,0.0,0.0,0.15738036434048006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13646511533721534,0.0,0.12835058258992788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17186264386651798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14672363706464753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178849963296446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067671871939948,0.07911722473882908,0.10647136625300097,0.10759626599683604,0.0,0.0,0.1243459448662417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454653890066744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528677123648242,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sparklewormlogic,2020/01/04,"PSYCHOLOGY QUESTION: Are most cases of mental illness attributable to defence mechanisms? Like how many cases of PTSD are intertwined with Repression (and the memories come out in flashbacks/ dreams), or how dissociation is a defence mechanism in itself but it could become some kind of dissociative disorder?

So if we had a tendency to use one coping mechanism more than others, would our mental health diagnosis correlate with this?

DISCLAIMER: I have diagnoses myself and so I am not trying to undermine mental health issues. I also understand that this doesn’t apply to a lot of cases, such as schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and some cases of depression etc. It just seems to explain/ relate to a lot of our experiences of depression, anxiety, PTSD etc.",8.50799650043745,10.668349913385832,8.960577427821523,55.953167104112,61.67716535433071,12.888538932633422,38.52055993000874,12.261556223090626,6.120519510061243,617,31,79,23,9,205,87,127,0.17,0.7829999999999999,0.047,-0.9636,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,3,0,0,0,7,7,2,1,5,0,9,5,0,4,0,31,14,12,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,7,8,0,3,4,1,0,1,2,5,0,1,1,0,7,2,20,11,8,4,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,9,1,71,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331827651287947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108400913506017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15649767410866414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206290537705801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313675613184618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24409380919839455,0.14382358045719604,0.0,0.0,0.3248033537399978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31606824994777616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138610814781504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012431745648814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789907853119236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475598354556191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922797422574957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24093832666160825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366262133442942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4284039823981519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602029705683607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3312818832644668,0.0,0.1587376030394338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899931175024362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620570977039204,0.0,0.0,0.1475157878323839,0.0,0.12238420868652596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066035856214717,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ado42007,2020/01/04,? Do u recon if u had a super power to be able to lie and then make urself so u actually beleived it would that b good or a bad power?,-0.9178494623655916,0.4928447419354853,3.2851612903225837,89.91440860215056,85.45161290322581,5.423655913978496,16.78494623655914,6.42735559955562,-0.32339569892473063,101,2,25,1,3,39,26,31,0.107,0.674,0.21899999999999997,0.5661,2,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,5,5,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,15,2,0,0.4820663089752416,0.0,0.470427178658757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4025052320711489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4043343484873171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217830045472104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3424460747379161,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,koala_on_a_treadmill,2020/01/04,"It's okay. I know it feels like you want to give up. I know you just want to end it, the pain, the suffering. The night has continued too long. It's okay to feel sad, to be different, to feel left out. Trust me, the night will pass. The sun will rise. There will be one day where you can smile again, laugh again. You are not insiignificant. You matter to  those around you. People love you for all your quirks, your pet peeves and even your flaws. That is what makes you, you. You matter to your friends, your family. I'm a complete stranger, but you matter to me. I want to see you happy. You are not insignificant. Don't give up. One day your future self will thank you for it. Be strong. You can do it. I know it. You know it. We're all here for you. We'll help you through. You can make it. Another day. Another week. Another month. Another year. You can make it a lifetime.",-0.8140636704119828,1.2455005898876443,0.6453483146067391,101.00367790262173,102.08988764044943,4.620524344569289,13.798501872659175,6.42735559955562,-0.7150814981273408,667,14,160,10,30,210,91,178,0.049,0.752,0.19899999999999998,0.9792,1,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,1,26,0,1,9,13,0,0,7,2,18,2,0,3,2,25,37,2,0,3,4,0,3,1,1,5,1,0,1,1,13,3,0,0,7,0,0,2,3,3,0,2,0,4,33,10,17,29,2,22,0,2,1,1,33,6,0,0,15,103,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5355880067566254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113673636556275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13388343849496367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470538161008546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13341176524080134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11309789182078007,0.0,0.0,0.08433986940801859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203773779376436,0.0,0.19369590173540616,0.09122373945279094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986551163196139,0.0,0.0,0.24498907840077605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593132668767507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558977119213533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807064248287524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387385667850507,0.0,0.0,0.062384236761771565,0.0,0.0,0.1130040820167506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524770918413035,0.0,0.25570774391549345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192314969312563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396620265047301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17305584953260816,0.0,0.13587410887555015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852608777748036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175460419230292,0.0,0.13321140648191745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756234532774035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22594951010315295,0.0,0.10242743671881334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222995645225788
mentalhealth,wildlystyley,2020/01/04,"Saving myself before I feel it’s too late I’ve been sitting on this for way, way too long now. I’ve just gotta write it down.

Right now, my head is splitting - but only figuratively. I feel this because I feel like I’ve steadily been losing my grip on my own being for an indeterminately long time. I’m tired of seeing the absence of humanity in humanity and of disbelieving the authenticity of reality. When the majority of what you feel is the distance between what you think you should be as opposed to what you are, your life is bound to lose its color. It’s happening to me. 

I don’t want to dissociate as often as I have and do; alongside that, I don’t want dissociative episodes to be as severe, as dehumanizing, and as stunting as they seem to be. It seems to occur at the worst of times, especially as I’m conversing with someone and especially with my girlfriend (despite her being my closest and most trustworthy confidant).

I want to love the things I love without fear of judgment or without feeling like none of my interests actually matter. I already question enough as it is, but it’s bled over into fully-fledged anxiety over what I love and how it shapes my character. 

I’m tired of observing myself from the outside of my body and of my being. I’m tired of thinking I must severely negatively impact others, and of thinking of how comically awful I must look and behave all the time. Ultimately, I just want to recognize myself. I have to live with me until I die, so if I don’t come around sometime or somewhere the results could be disastrous. 

Finally, I’m tired of thinking all these aforementioned things all the time. It’s draining to be in this kind of mental tar pit of sorts; it makes me feel dumb and like I’m punching so far below my weight in almost everything I do and in everything I say in social settings. At the end of the day, I blame myself for all of it. If I’m in mental shackles, I put myself there. I made the decisions. I took courses of action, willingly, which led to my current circumstances (some positive, some negative, of course, but cumulatively mentally taxing nonetheless). 

There’s that word: blame. A lot of that very thing comes from a place of self-infliction, self-loathing, and most definitely self-apathy. I do not love myself. I do love self-flagellation and ridiculously overanalyzing even my slightest faults. My problems will continue to manifest until this paradigm changes.

What are some good steps to take when you’re a young person like me (I turn 19 this coming week and am planning on returning to university in the fall) and want to preserve my mental fortitude going into my adult life?",6.803532934131737,7.249628065868263,7.6455548902195645,69.99228443113775,64.74850299401197,10.831696606786428,35.06327345309381,10.650279960617883,3.872788902195608,2115,92,373,52,30,710,245,501,0.154,0.7190000000000001,0.127,-0.9516,1,0,0,0,0,0,63.0,0,5,1,3,17,21,2,1,18,1,32,14,2,6,6,87,74,39,1,12,12,0,8,4,1,6,6,1,0,4,30,24,1,2,15,1,1,10,9,8,0,0,4,12,57,13,80,55,15,59,0,2,3,5,22,24,1,17,25,272,87,1,0.0,0.0,0.07090920776805985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727621156016727,0.0,0.08018610760890202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055587467668177466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646860241903729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04429506612709435,0.0,0.06183138564067086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071289699699445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768684713150466,0.18777981439485916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801598501485317,0.0,0.0,0.04686202127647642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754133617329284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435839643941882,0.07508093996541518,0.0,0.0479936333350182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061074611298798,0.0,0.0,0.08176677015440231,0.22044544653992476,0.10382180417107048,0.0,0.07959944001278799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04129640774216861,0.06094679394671616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425619602023643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07457383389532031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566797471734885,0.0,0.0,0.0819677243201284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10264892238427123,0.14199909039673084,0.0,0.06416330455334145,0.12861002787269235,0.06101913698890876,0.16258400026959385,0.0,0.061776008200260774,0.3279087539562925,0.0687560707843276,0.04850352819903755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29291133872414465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055263954631335065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06344706708697008,0.07591801349096931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695292674731123,0.0,0.07304700432229183,0.08139988023430017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205433139089477,0.0,0.057785024276972914,0.0,0.0,0.05790349449238045,0.1323004546587292,0.30321599706567104,0.1641784073449956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407140618979201,0.061567646385823224,0.0,0.07186617463799412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054633996445210296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482343391827893,0.18623964548120653,0.0,0.0,0.16948295630693122,0.3340645512756032,0.0,0.0,0.08073195147790985,0.0,0.07903714877646906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05995509349165525,0.21429441805385555,0.11535399299408458,0.058286370086092776,0.08848470910086248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400902664331348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OliveOilBerryOil,2020/01/04,"How alarming is hypomania? I’ve had 3-4 episodes in the last few years. I really enjoy them and I feel like surely anyone can experience them under the right circumstances?


Would you say hypomania falls under normality? Or does it take certain predispositions? I’m not complaining, but considering the taboo and the stories my bipolar friend has told me, I can’t fully come to see it as a positive experience I sometimes have, and sometimes I think maybe I’m not quite normal. I’m not looking for a medical take on the rates of hypomania.",4.566955555555552,7.0548941400000045,6.325333333333332,69.50322222222222,72.6,9.644444444444446,31.11111111111111,9.994966539143718,3.705177777777779,434,20,73,13,9,149,73,100,0.013000000000000001,0.7959999999999999,0.191,0.9494,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,2,1,1,7,0,1,7,0,7,2,0,1,2,18,18,7,0,3,5,0,1,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,2,4,10,5,8,15,1,9,0,0,2,0,7,5,0,1,3,44,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332911800460745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642554494631289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686689045544706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3730466944409742,0.0,0.0,0.0964144256404878,0.13622308523800788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732025238372515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543108183842086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315747471966712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16012465137850038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19156545418828355,0.0,0.0,0.1920918093506612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3736552724068405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20281351995739727,0.0,0.0,0.12215561616331708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284117853549893,0.0,0.15163778650180385,0.0,0.0,0.1519486726086381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37717826661189663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17971529926373736,0.0,0.28673790112087844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218117043737547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822045902166668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13545484918346698,0.0,0.0,0.12279279970440735
mentalhealth,artifact9703,2020/01/04,"A mountian of cold shoulders I recently managed to end months of harrassment it wasn't the usual bit a person from my past that held some serious animosity towards me apparently paid a couple of people to spread rumors, follow me around cause problems all over for me. I was aware of this while it was going on what i didn't know was who was responsible for it or that at some point in late november they managed to somehow get a spy app on my pho e and were monitoring.. At least my texting.. Maybe more I'm honestly not clear on it. Regardless getting in my head and directing these guys exactly where to attack my life at.. As you can imagine drove me a bit manic. 

Finally the man behind it all decided to play his hand i figured the whole thing out and put an end to it by threatening legal action.

My problem now is that every single person i try to explain this to from casual friend tonfamipy member refuses to engage with me on it at all. Mostly I'm only trying to let these people know why I've been manic and generally not myself. I don't know if it's a result of the two rumor mill.. /Harrassment guys and the things they said about me. Or if I'm somehow approaching this all wrong. But no one will so much as acknowledge it happened.. Say ""sorry to hear that"". In most cases i get practically cut off. One person at least went far enough to suggest i seek out a therapist.. Which i lilely will. Aside from that i feel like no one even believes me. 

To be clear i don't have any history of mental illness. I was in an abusive situation for several years at one point and to be honest it has made very sensitive to this kind of stuff. It also left me with a general tendency to avoid conflict.. Which i will admit os why these guys kept doing what they were doing for so long. I never puched the school yard bully to get him to stop
..and that's on me.

Anyhow, what I'm looking for here is some kind of insight as to why my attempts to explain this situation to people almost universally results in a cold shoulder. In the most extreme example a person i beleived to be a friend for years became very angry with me. Refused to respond at all after i told them and has not spokento me since.


All this has left me pretty emotionally drained amd I'm really at this point just looking for some insight or shared experience from others on this as apparently no one close to me is willing to even talk about.

As i said i plan on seeking out a therapist at some point soon here I'm just looking for any support or insight as to why I'm esssentially being ostracized just because i thought it prudent to tell the people close to and around me about something that seems very relevant.

Thanks for your time",5.126773675762442,5.8894683707865205,6.226203317281968,77.59843820224722,68.47565543071161,9.17401819154628,30.61294810058855,9.312151188531436,2.6732602033172825,2146,82,405,41,35,718,259,534,0.10300000000000001,0.82,0.077,-0.9002,2,1,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,2,4,2,20,20,2,1,22,0,31,6,4,4,10,86,69,26,0,5,13,0,2,1,2,4,2,4,1,8,40,19,0,7,16,3,1,7,11,7,0,6,20,11,49,13,94,40,23,65,0,0,3,0,36,40,0,19,19,302,89,4,0.0,0.0867608326546375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332525870239848,0.0,0.0,0.05855880348902681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09959237821768464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037332460629175,0.0,0.08330514304044137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044637888221798434,0.0,0.0,0.08250062323633038,0.0,0.0,0.15988764710714592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522327013312291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810231730989509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823693908777376,0.12971299774805947,0.07566202962983608,0.0,0.09673016105313366,0.0,0.06169606083551672,0.0,0.0,0.07162907620926832,0.0,0.0,0.03702526436924672,0.05231266701664245,0.0,0.08021550065223161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314844755266595,0.0,0.153030244939901,0.0,0.04161602169116471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21751574934924825,0.06475350747371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515099880738417,0.0,0.08253102072523825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15250721548587304,0.12072927907459373,0.0,0.08260211431898122,0.0,0.15912052038490554,0.07487854332965302,0.05172168735824993,0.035774523434164006,0.0,0.0,0.06480270321655582,0.184474185577665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928820906226298,0.0,0.0,0.07356535641029137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07379458221910205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844829233231742,0.0,0.05382953341852665,0.0,0.056476403264754525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480991539643724,0.05569167054520198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990250000260395,0.2030627457268836,0.2557524651168095,0.0,0.0,0.2768889442763225,0.0,0.0,0.0744971643532495,0.0,0.14013477982866726,0.0,0.0736123523220391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04691044885233172,0.0,0.07230183816513333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393093838056259,0.05823225203385937,0.0,0.07410861849557727,0.0,0.0666621976565594,0.0,0.08272453386197869,0.0,0.06057330156387675,0.16461817775867876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05637295012770975,0.0,0.08197050874232797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061220212485590425,0.0,0.0,0.08382624760477407,0.0,0.08309599383254485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05885628278181439,0.06400274910179947,0.06741665998035838,0.0,0.1700420532384534,0.09729619752822206,0.0,0.0,0.05813326233766735,0.04269866782353201,0.0,0.0,0.0699705783366654,0.0,0.0994312908090589,0.0,0.07153115909132615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064809060281854,0.18125734956094566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678812330057386,0.2643002915187461,0.08175421080035883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800611327067192,0.0,0.0943102827506019
mentalhealth,maya0202,2020/01/04,"I have a question So idk if what I'm going to say makes sense but here it is. First I do have anxiety disorder/s and depression. Ok so basically I constantly compare myself to people who I think have it worse than me and wish I was in that position. Idk why I do this like I logistically know I don't want to have it worse and experience it, but I just emotionally or mentally desire it idk which one it is. Like I've had it hard af in the past like abuse and almost going homeless for example but I still look and compare myself. Maybe I do it's because I don't feel like I deserve depressed or anxious because I don't have it as hard as other people. Maybe I do it because I'm just used to all the bad things that happened and think there normal. 

Idk if any of this makes sense but I really would appreciate it if someone could help. This has gone on for a long time and it really upsets me because I don't want to think this way.",1.99720588235294,3.682393576530615,4.198307322929171,85.49795318127255,77.5204081632653,7.468907563025211,24.284513805522213,8.313332769828598,1.4531768307322936,735,25,158,14,17,254,100,196,0.22,0.636,0.14400000000000002,-0.9175,0,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,1,4,1,20,0,0,3,1,36,38,20,0,10,11,0,3,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,23,7,0,0,6,0,0,3,4,4,0,2,3,5,21,5,14,33,1,13,0,2,1,0,4,3,0,7,10,108,44,0,0.0,0.15143985364663445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798824200656506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691857097339796,0.0,0.09777811166726512,0.1443945489886268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672017144270346,0.3116593076653767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812258883648626,0.0,0.10204986302184403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201737140505181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437746517387792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502757852907034,0.0,0.0,0.0646270954962644,0.09131104894302784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10871935870872547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452803999554119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302636679341195,0.0,0.2289942375630401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567168845771889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024377165941861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497757768053558,0.0,0.0,0.113112237293598,0.10733239416404028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706349864617724,0.0,0.2568146585818073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288074398232277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12523154503125966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661073993095224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201386323788775,0.1772216307350023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431820320861248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16376310119046145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164360409754808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829721978592682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207321002519694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491459488811398,0.2456960392777279,0.0,0.0,0.07452994408020258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039110682952677,0.0,0.0,0.15077717634643584,0.10145358370676008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533314123922915,0.0,0.14698092186258113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605087731468104,0.09079609628391418,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HereAtManorFarm,2020/01/04,"The Epic Battle for Mental Health and Inner Peace, and the warrior women who lead it >In Greek, *psyche* denotes the mind and [*mache*](http://www.perseus.tufts.edu/hopper/text?doc=Perseus%3Atext%3A1999.04.0057%3Aentry%3Dma%2Fxh) a struggle or fight, so a ""[psychomachy](https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/psychomachy)"" is the effort to cope with mental problems—[addiction](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/addiction), [anxiety](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/anxiety), explosive [anger](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/anger), and so on—and overcome them.  
>  
>We get the word from a book published 1,600 years ago in Spain. Written in Latin, [*Psychomachia*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychomachia) is a short epic poem. It describes the battle in us all to slay our inner demons and win peace of mind.  
>  
>And the remarkable thing is that in the poem, the combatants who wage the war and slay those demons—the ""coping mechanisms""—are all women.

More [here](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/ancient-insights/202001/the-epic-battle-mental-health-and-inner-peace).",14.778164456233421,19.78585015862069,8.697931034482759,52.5690185676393,50.86206896551725,9.427055702917773,30.464190981432363,9.851270322608157,3.73157824933687,943,28,96,18,13,245,91,145,0.109,0.779,0.11199999999999999,0.34,1,0,0,0,1,0,137.0,2,0,1,3,2,6,4,1,14,0,3,1,0,1,2,14,5,9,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,7,7,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,3,1,10,4,3,10,1,0,0,0,8,7,0,1,2,49,10,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229698201659602,0.0,0.0,0.11570698152035007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09985510329532304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819654479288435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277494601662352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3946306588285413,0.0,0.26359620806636663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13645831154828156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671834114251811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7850576744389384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405704930495124
mentalhealth,Throw_RA33,2020/01/04,"Depression but also borderline ? Hi everyone. Since September I have been diagnosed depressive. Basically I was unhappy, sad, had no energy to do anything. This was triggered by me moving to a new city with no family and friends there, a new job, and by being now 3 hours away from my GF.

I had everything to be happy (I should spend 3 years there, not too far from my GF, not too far from my family). But I couldn't help being unhappy. It has been a few months of pain, panic attacks, etc. I really thought I would become crazy, and I really thought about getting into psychiatry hospital to find a safe place.

I am seeing a therapist, and as the therapy goes on, I feel like I have been developping concerning behaviours since 3-4 years (I am 22). During some weeks/months I developp stron maniac trends (basically I must enter a room with the right foot first, I must walk a certain way, etc. otherwise I am panicking). This sometimes led me to strange situations. This happens when I am alone (not hanging out with people).

I have also a HUGE fear for people leaving me or getting bored of me. It applies to my family, my GF, my friends.

I learnt about the DSM-5 test for personnalities, and I tried to make the test (online, so I know this is not 100% reliable). And the only criteria I do not fill is the impulsive and dangerous behaviour and the suicidal tendancies (I still think about suicide sometimes though, but do not want to commit).

So I wonder if I might be ""developping"" my borderline personnality. I know that my behaviour has been evolving for the last few years, and I feel like there is something more than depression going on. I meet still many criteria for borderline, but do not want to talk about it to my therapist because I fear I could have it, and because I fear I could also be misdiagnosed.

Any opinion ?",5.4072035957240026,6.71118321282799,6.634478862973765,72.9516988581147,68.18367346938776,11.081098153547131,32.3674684159378,11.038039088145766,3.9848582118561713,1434,62,259,46,24,484,173,343,0.233,0.682,0.084,-0.9958,1,1,1,0,0,1,61.0,0,0,0,1,19,20,3,4,16,0,38,3,1,3,4,55,54,24,2,10,13,0,2,2,5,5,2,0,1,0,9,15,0,1,9,0,1,7,10,13,0,1,10,3,45,7,35,31,6,32,0,4,1,0,9,11,0,6,15,190,54,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455057750785044,0.0,0.21901760644078466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06208142641060513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512521779719858,0.0,0.0,0.10385738747971288,0.08577147423408282,0.0,0.0,0.11130103818624616,0.10082441259430283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577784679276282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23588799389995016,0.09265906410045127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036285575628856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723304709965912,0.08204701398878674,0.0,0.2581848200127204,0.3081853308856815,0.0923195636617273,0.1304374911356216,0.0,0.0,0.08343887911520888,0.0776525981904332,0.0,0.0,0.14106334532671536,0.0,0.0953921982771405,0.0,0.051883126688171036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072887064251,0.09718161810858787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06119084291075109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990384813101211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059283798602666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034296450668087,0.07441484798291148,0.0,0.09666463521604897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920094022046958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060937859633836286,0.09255536537715033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684597321361484,0.0,0.0,0.14573618681233488,0.09702853555801956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17634001471421665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943138437920518,0.0971407112793644,0.10711103633579454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658021759480806,0.0,0.09538030369271523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696748809227073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796253749732257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274759488022789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15103472899364734,0.10261559640673996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028074271411829,0.18057947638529734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14581119789953614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19971641172404028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337673933911852,0.0,0.0,0.10439991400719306,0.21199319473539255,0.0,0.05849597851942653,0.08969354488395669,0.1449506844765134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061981011737482085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769231561129697,0.07246303201315926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900185854053707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06485094159618895,0.0,0.0,0.17636641427160524
mentalhealth,cheyisabear,2020/01/04,"My narcolepsy is controlling my life (F20)So for those of you who dont know, narcolepsy is a sleep disorder. You dont recieve enough ""restful"" sleep at night, and are constantly tired during the day. I could sleep for 18hrs a day, and not be affected. I originally seeked professional help when I started falling asleep standing at work, even though the symptoms had been present for years. Well, I was diagnosed, and its affected my entire life. I cant do normal things with kids my age (20s) because I'm too tired and I fear I'll either fall asleep at the event, or on the car ride home. If I work a full time job, I dont have enough energy to do the things I enjoy once I get home, instead I nap for 3 hours before bedtime. If I work a part time job, I cant afford rent. My whole life has become a constant ""work, sleep, sleep some more, get up and work"" routine. I've become so depressed with my current situation, but feel like theres nothing I can physically do to change it. I've tried medication, but it's caused me to become zombie-like at times, missing work and potentially losing the job I have. I guess I'm just hoping that someone can relate, or give some input on their situation. Maybe give advice, or even a kind word. This sleep disorder has opened up a new level of depression, and I dont know how to take control of my life. I'm looking for something and I dont know if it even exists. Please help, my parents feel as if it's a made up diagnosis (even though I've gone to a professional) even though I KNOW it's real. I just need some validation.",4.132390357246589,5.150560747603837,5.227006970665119,82.92786450769678,70.91693290734823,8.37461516119663,27.32631426081905,8.710501217029153,1.8682728434504785,1226,41,252,21,22,405,162,313,0.094,0.818,0.08800000000000001,-0.2462,7,0,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,2,1,9,17,10,0,1,15,0,24,17,8,8,0,48,46,24,0,8,13,1,2,1,0,0,9,0,3,1,12,11,0,2,6,1,1,5,8,5,1,0,5,3,32,5,25,39,11,36,0,4,1,0,10,12,0,12,19,154,44,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499150687913313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04054307060174762,0.22036081665385693,0.056593983317257665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832272926415472,0.07035735877743861,0.0,0.0,0.14374449876931258,0.1491902673691802,0.053101764646613016,0.0,0.0,0.08578518572255323,0.0,0.11456764760555008,0.06750490451724611,0.0,0.0,0.15244940580258534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38973835531775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744247908466015,0.0,0.2196417609077482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484074920974193,0.06725756827527005,0.04751381027890388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949607465717124,0.12760236163703825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326680310351233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915872501241766,0.0,0.13342724641383166,0.06605812045435222,0.06549764712967147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19799879064923426,0.0,0.0,0.06925854975482726,0.14620571238789185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18790817448958247,0.03249277882789478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055850535856538736,0.07440619439117081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293211582774105,0.0,0.0,0.06681690280609348,0.0,0.0,0.06700049238843803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049315339337671515,0.0,0.06423449217525062,0.0,0.0624138855012427,0.0651643797812665,0.06381686683362954,0.0,0.0,0.07082956762542067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385001214787848,0.07202241314989294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300655230878685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570143206663664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495170732548659,0.3993402370027233,0.0,0.056352583988513935,0.051201626871327184,0.0,0.0,0.04707518205708487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912797841599558,0.05000624604054723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837081597739976,0.0,0.196033304738786,0.0,0.1163452286699786,0.15288387479822882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04515502417211077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05979928565438429,0.0,0.0,0.07425455980353643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29051464245685515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04282940573968736
mentalhealth,[deleted],2020/01/04,"Goodbye Facebook... Goodbye Goodbye! So normally I only last a week or 2 on Facebook, I think it's been about a month now this time round? I'm in Victoria Australia where all the fires are atm and it has honestly done my fucking head in. So now here I am free of Facebook, still have the app that says what the fires are doing with alerts, told all my close friends what I've done and to contact me. Tonight we had a change in the wind and been told we should be pretty good for a nights rest where we are. My obsessiveness with my bipolar type 2 was eating me alive, so yeah I might have backed out of Facebook at a pretty ridiculous time, but if I can go about my day without seeing photos of the destruction that the fires are doing, and videos firefighters have posted of communities that are burnt and lost their homes. Then fuck it. Doing this for my own wellbeing.",5.265358851674641,5.918479959064332,5.101967038809146,86.17215311004787,68.12280701754386,8.089526847421585,28.995746943115364,8.00094639256281,1.6967730994152044,687,23,140,8,11,212,104,171,0.092,0.809,0.099,-0.6438,0,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,3,0,1,1,12,10,4,1,11,1,23,5,1,0,2,22,32,12,0,3,4,0,4,0,1,2,1,1,1,0,10,12,1,0,1,1,2,1,1,6,0,0,9,6,17,5,18,20,4,24,0,1,2,2,9,9,2,3,13,102,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098974403998864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18020923826593285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986258752595614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34865734066913906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17431205386126694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316131018246126,0.314974326987797,0.0,0.0,0.09681465046747777,0.14288270761719427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17482972629657706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708763863366339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885916206161544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18595872274170155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18071595997310086,0.0,0.0,0.13597289607756122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15986328877090872,0.16690824451783814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295599482765638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314959233291365,0.3466173187433401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135470304404159,0.0,0.0,0.1357480441186421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360428819540122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109154325801312,0.0,0.0,0.19866659198900927,0.0,0.0,0.3255562069312226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13664565165412598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16421271146994387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gdogisabear,2020/01/04,"I was diagnosed with narcolepsy and depression. (F20)So for those of you who dont know, narcolepsy is a sleep disorder. You dont recieve enough ""restful"" sleep at night, and are constantly tired during the day. I could sleep for 18hrs a day, and not be affected. I originally seeked professional help when I started falling asleep standing at work, even though the symptoms had been present for years. Well, I was diagnosed, and its affected my entire life. I cant do normal things with kids my age (20s) because I'm too tired and I fear I'll either fall asleep at the event, or on the car ride home. If I work a full time job, I dont have enough energy to do the things I enjoy once I get home, instead I nap for 3 hours before bedtime. If I work a part time job, I cant afford rent. My whole life has become a constant ""work, sleep, sleep some more, get up and work"" routine. I've become so depressed with my current situation, but feel like theres nothing I can physically do to change it. I've tried medication, but it's caused me to become zombie-like at times, missing work and potentially losing the job I have. I guess I'm just hoping that someone can relate, or give some input on their situation. Maybe give advice, or even a kind word. This sleep disorder has opened up a new level of depression, and I dont know how to take control of my life. I'm looking for something and I dont know if it even exists. Please help, my parents feel as if it's a made up diagnosis (even though I've gone to a professional) even though I KNOW it's real. I just need some validation.",3.9210869565217408,5.158140410828028,5.066831902520079,83.05192882857936,71.64331210191081,8.263417335918026,27.02797009138743,8.716276077567194,1.8738855164774293,1235,42,252,22,23,408,161,314,0.102,0.8109999999999999,0.087,-0.5161,7,0,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,2,1,8,17,11,0,1,15,0,24,17,8,7,0,49,46,25,0,8,13,1,2,1,0,0,9,0,3,1,12,13,0,1,6,1,1,5,8,6,1,0,6,3,31,5,26,38,11,36,0,5,1,0,10,12,0,12,19,155,43,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505865870043746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04058496132198036,0.2205885022529912,0.05665245848173859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839332303750889,0.0704300548112889,0.0,0.0,0.14389302132800305,0.07467220835677266,0.05315663151125004,0.0,0.0,0.0858738224035416,0.0,0.17202903521401378,0.13514930656279964,0.0,0.0,0.15260692261898176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3901410485564283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13758449014484808,0.0,0.2198687035497595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491807766169738,0.06732706148173752,0.04756290344585061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956788077786036,0.1277342054947687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334250529147199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925084736897249,0.0,0.1335651087752164,0.06612637434341348,0.06556532191530286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982033709097424,0.0,0.0,0.06933011045529823,0.14635677797081798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107674654176738,0.03252635166505933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05590824286140268,0.07448307384372732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06299713980393885,0.0,0.0,0.0668859406993937,0.0,0.0,0.06706971997382911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049366293916412465,0.0,0.06430086181872033,0.0,0.06247837402116398,0.06523171022175955,0.06388280496991224,0.0,0.0,0.07090275156431734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392631693072185,0.07209682958443941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308198559522844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577964981050392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14967156026812795,0.3997528512891516,0.0,0.05641080972956456,0.0512545304377047,0.0,0.0,0.04712382201582972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919940420494294,0.050057914491695166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846212423486283,0.0,0.19623585418073075,0.0,0.11646544120820745,0.15304184052534847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04520168014701896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059861072665291074,0.0,0.0,0.07433128258117924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908148137914395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042873658792723215
mentalhealth,ActuallyTheMothman,2020/01/04,"Insomnia Anything that *actually* works to knock you out and get you to stop thinking about everything besides diphenhydramine or other sleep aids? :/  (please dont suggest alcohol or weed, i dont do either) i usually just take diphenhydramine to knock myself out but im not supposed to take it every day :/",3.7093650793650816,6.932023481481488,4.463015873015877,76.805,82.7037037037037,8.27089947089947,29.936507936507937,8.841846274778883,3.504273015873016,244,12,38,7,7,78,40,54,0.11800000000000001,0.882,0.0,-0.6597,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,11,7,4,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,7,7,1,5,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,3,25,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.22411677402488875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24543860462470374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889920814254709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811285252435638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5383238055200661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19349995993643915,0.0,0.2064052045791708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11998880424424065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24807413904012615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520996748878105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298276449950255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200753666987047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3453541626198538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14715799913219432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25294001090604634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16719651546652325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,freakishslippers,2020/01/04,"I convinced myself I was fine, but now I just feel lost. Tw: suicide, self harm

I am not sure if this is going to make sense. I suspected I have had something wrong with me and have had people suggest as much to me in the past (like genuinely asking me if I am bipolar or like suggesting I am depressed) and have self harmed in the past but it all kinda felt fake, like I was doing it for attention. Like attention of people I was attracted to. Anyway during all this I graduated college, got a high paying job, got engaged, all the normal things people dream of. I felt kinda lost after all that kind of existential like what next but I was doing okay. And the farther from the negative stuff I was the less real it felt, like I was faking it or something. And there was this once when I was doing some self harm that I started bleeding a lot and I couldn’t bring myself to get help because it would be too embarrassing even though I genuinely thought I was going to die. So I decided I wouldn’t do that stuff and it had been over two years since. All of a sudden I make a nearly successful suicide attempt and I am just sitting there dying in so much pain and agony because I don’t feel like I deserve an easy death. I don’t get help, I don’t do anything. I just try and wait it out. Towards the end the pain gets so bad that I go to the hospital because I can’t handle it. By the time I arrive my body has started shutting down and I spend a long time in the ICU trying to recover. At that point the negative feelings had left and they feel fake again. I left the hospital but ever since I have no real will left, no appetite, nothing. Its been months and I haven’t even scheduled a follow up with a psychiatrist. I feel so lost. When I was inpatient, I felt like I was too happy to be there, when I am out here, I feel too sad to be out here. And I spent so much time convincing myself I didn’t have problems that I actually believed it and was fine and a very functional human being who is so happy. But I guess it was all real all along. I just don’t know what to think anymore.

Edit: added tw",2.9742045454545485,4.233491597222226,4.456658249158252,86.42689393939396,74.0,7.2734006734006735,25.35942760942761,7.793537801064563,1.286554629629629,1638,53,344,22,33,547,189,432,0.222,0.638,0.141,-0.9938,1,0,2,0,0,2,39.0,0,0,1,5,28,37,0,1,22,1,52,5,1,2,9,77,86,35,5,7,14,0,10,8,0,3,4,0,0,4,26,21,0,1,17,1,3,5,14,17,0,1,31,10,55,20,35,47,13,47,0,5,0,0,11,20,0,9,29,261,81,6,0.0,0.0,0.0734953717574923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469101874682896,0.0,0.0,0.061976812507772025,0.0,0.07040820486987796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288384899390237,0.13773171867955467,0.0,0.0,0.08485282408532646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365661607476449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486763654710206,0.0,0.15632759779726038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670564262264601,0.0,0.0,0.09948806466679404,0.06812561340365915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22848541896974936,0.053804169685868465,0.2892521056559041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11804500327612386,0.0,0.12840764696683515,0.0,0.12047059789095095,0.0,0.08296660451735573,0.0,0.0,0.16034580933867054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096245999605127,0.0795731290979249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473729193789189,0.0,0.0,0.07842769799626888,0.041390476327753736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454858823170732,0.0,0.0,0.2943560157115273,0.0,0.0,0.06665031318050214,0.0,0.0,0.2466416178225147,0.06402907085385821,0.0,0.0,0.10054504763890444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011472971731292,0.0,0.16609285180815594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009704486530178,0.0,0.07379150033737356,0.07226558997861719,0.0,0.0,0.0802067031232576,0.0,0.0,0.16027831469547596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437910237078911,0.1566392479735136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119585270449286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206510299307385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571706629589121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23570605068723705,0.0,0.0,0.1246006514918949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596043357527012,0.0,0.0,0.10661494283556228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17243248748231624,0.1647620728043655,0.0,0.0709823334263675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05003511979166367,0.04825802040193685,0.07399539299089672,0.059790717804808075,0.13174818834262322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226620717069496,0.0,0.07357060614692364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062141744684802776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05350073871478818,0.08234378048484416,0.0,0.048499596231839165
mentalhealth,WhatAmI71,2020/01/04,"Guess Who Is Back From The Depths Of Hell Itself? That experience SUCKED worse than anything I have ever gone through...  


Guys...Arson is not fun...trust me.

​

Wish I listened better in 2019...",2.928571428571427,6.011781857142861,2.3114285714285714,90.95857142857146,87.57142857142857,3.9428571428571435,21.285714285714285,5.6839178017228535,0.17854285714285778,155,5,27,1,5,45,33,35,0.266,0.604,0.13,-0.7804,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,3,1,5,7,0,5,1,0,0,0,2,2,2,1,2,18,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191299660840765,0.3578938521772819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24237828492516994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264802398005536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604934287150508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26642495262536153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881130257886208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32446494899136336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3387022177765596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001576602491648,0.0,0.0,0.3578938521772819,0.0
mentalhealth,mercuryv3,2020/01/04,"Am I just a dumb teen or is there something wrong with me Hha this is a dumb post, but I really dont know who to talk to besides being semi anonymous online lmao 

I've known that on my dad's side of the family, there's a large history of mental illness, with his dad being a bit of a sociopathic pedo (nasty) and his mom being schizophrenic, with this in mind, I've really been thinking. 

After the entirety of 2019, I've been noticing things that have been quite prevalent in my day to day life, it's not everything, but a gist I guess 
 
- Minor but quick bursts of stress give me crazy anxiety attacks, I start to freak out and cry like I never do 
- Within these anxiety attacks, especially after my mom yells at me, I develop a huge self hatred against myself, but after I fall asleep, I seem to be fine the next day 
- I'm lazy, but in a way where I can't motivate myself to do reoccurring work, such as homework or even some classwork 
- Along with being lazy, I spend most of my weekends just in bed, really sleepy, prob doesn't mean anything but who knows 
- If I'm watching a movie or show, I have to be doing something at the same time, whether it's being on my phone, playing with a controller, or even eating/drinking
- I'm very sensitive towards loud noises or bangs, when my neighbors alarm went off because I was taking care of her dogs, the screech almost dropped me on to the floor as a ball and started crying
- And overall, I'm just sad, throughout fall, I developed alot of suicidal thoughts for really no reason, sometimes it could trigger from my mom or sister, insecurities, or just for no reason, I've really never vented that to anyone because when I did in middle school, the counselor lied and said it would stick between us, which clearly didn't 

Idk, this might be more of a vent than anything, especially since idk who to talk to, but yeah, thanks anyways hha :)",9.777295081967214,6.714853724043717,9.369169398907108,71.3493278688525,60.93989071038251,12.164371584699454,38.880874316939895,10.047579312681364,3.735390382513661,1477,53,281,22,15,479,205,366,0.20800000000000002,0.705,0.08800000000000001,-0.9939,0,0,3,0,0,0,50.0,1,0,0,4,14,15,4,3,20,1,28,4,1,5,3,58,47,25,1,3,21,6,0,1,1,2,3,3,3,1,16,12,0,1,10,4,1,3,9,10,0,0,9,4,31,5,51,27,6,41,0,1,1,0,20,19,2,15,17,190,47,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122998774811506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467166187974304,0.0,0.0,0.07068654198479077,0.0,0.16638177026701784,0.0,0.0,0.2300156524115477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232506494422113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036731983055313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307100120768917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338434084292072,0.0807144954992678,0.0,0.22209171979732156,0.1955897708763389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184801858677705,0.09903260565608107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335418816321424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085582599859143,0.0,0.09530143731884948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969775704497759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136528303153816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111608430561297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140494108364072,0.04938890953843465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011986023601343,0.0,0.0,0.10187791746137567,0.10724364560254428,0.10207506231865536,0.35519652778320604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15593823224688325,0.0,0.10751350044159234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509499494422808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096819102546089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752479734439067,0.0,0.0,0.3238136657555895,0.20788078161569368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616254661355653,0.0,0.0,0.10231146367699932,0.0,0.09203122595754576,0.10546199562153999,0.0,0.0,0.08362513387182292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15565258552757058,0.09998351364512552,0.0,0.14310822231841375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158016340054059,0.0,0.0,0.11057928052776156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600931810525942,0.1625093696316622,0.0,0.09307280716907017,0.0,0.0,0.06716166473885166,0.06477628115393344,0.0,0.08025651103509207,0.058948112793983126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160237300821478,0.0,0.0,0.08341227202384739,0.0,0.0802428791475305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371417853958544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359687246147183,0.0,0.0,0.07181353201121278,0.11052927226476048,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,celestial-ashes,2020/01/04,"How to ask for a psychiatrist? I’m 17F, and for a while I’ve struggled with mental health. I’m not formally diagnosed, but I feel that I have issues with anxiety as well as feelings of depression. 

Thing is, my family is kind of oblivious to the whole mental health thing. I’m at a turning point in my life, and I feel absolutely helpless and anxious all the time to the point that it’s affecting my ability to live a normal live. 

How can I ask my family (mother, specifically) to seek out a psychiatrist privately? I don’t want to burden her with my problems so I’d rather speak to a professional who can actually help me, medication or not.",4.559523809523808,5.791884793650794,6.633492063492067,72.43928571428572,70.1111111111111,10.996825396825399,30.66666666666667,10.980518767755715,3.720800000000001,508,21,97,17,9,179,77,126,0.182,0.738,0.081,-0.9359999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,9,0,6,5,0,3,1,22,16,11,0,4,5,1,3,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,6,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,0,4,12,2,19,16,2,7,0,2,0,0,7,5,0,1,2,67,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.15056093334626244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802840953817327,0.17429932601996787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2884732680969948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13288635282673006,0.15659709781418127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908943225085726,0.0,0.2340349950851862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3279977227880989,0.0,0.0,0.10341469024810082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16103455632068153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16066518378163436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897680320809758,0.0,0.0,0.2724748258852505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542696838375689,0.31096810931989555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116757556483018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917003826837223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14763091755128968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16129328345567473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050015982171548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08996543922519122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16781892314657545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100191246986608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13872169217638658,0.0,0.0,0.17225487018847113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sappint,2020/01/04,"how to work on developing self confidence when everything you think is against it? I have major self confidence issues, and I don't want it to effect other people anymore, especially my boyfriend. I realize that it's annoying and I need to work on it, but I don't know how.

Whenever I try and work on self confidence, I just end up throwing myself back in a self-pitying hole of ""I don't deserve this"" or ""why would I believe lies."" Outside compliments are nice, but my brain always just convinces me the person just is pitying me, wants to shut me up, or some other dumb excuse. I try and push myself into my more logical mindset of ""why would they just say that if they didn't mean it,"" but then I feel selfish and conceited for thinking it could be true.

I need to pull out of this. It's to the point where even when I'm helping or trying my best I feel useless, and I genuinely can't even stand myself when I have meltdowns over it. Where do I even start with tackling this?",5.983790209790207,5.687736964102562,6.572867132867135,79.51258741258744,66.53846153846153,9.757575757575758,33.111888111888106,9.339509955726095,2.808692307692308,768,30,153,13,11,252,108,195,0.09,0.753,0.157,0.93,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,2,5,16,10,2,0,3,0,15,1,1,3,1,40,27,19,0,8,11,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,15,9,0,0,9,0,0,3,5,5,0,0,1,3,29,5,21,22,4,24,0,2,0,0,10,13,1,5,7,115,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109935146835234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228983678016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257084710528848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15028803244245525,0.1399875381452066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891050621885948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650331496109118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814644816636903,0.0,0.0,0.26431410477119016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988486817049933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348948387159685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941039751428015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922745075796705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330920704417469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14530388978636274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978181762073748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247778780481053,0.11647346791735165,0.0,0.0,0.12609933418670285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060793269135934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5566312254882636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441612674911744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709454697343218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716949122208545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735708628958306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24073254981683515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29133469172163123,0.0,0.0,0.18951686858596495,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BLlON,2020/01/04,"dependency I hate how dependent I actually am compared to how dependent I act. I have a hard time being able to go to sleep if someone isn't at least on a call with me. I barely make any money and live with my parents. I'm honestly trying to try to get better. It's difficult when you're your only support.  I can't rely on anyone, not even my parents even though I love them dearly. They've been good to me, but they just don't understand who I am and how I feel. But they're nice, they're good people who don't understand what they're doing wrong, and that's okay. I understand. I wish I had someone to fall onto, but there's never a constant and ever barely anyone who makes me feel like they understand or at least are close to it. I hate myself for being me.",2.8991666666666696,4.029591250000003,4.8762500000000015,83.85041666666669,74.0,7.833333333333335,23.958333333333336,8.344100000000001,1.3870833333333341,600,17,125,10,12,207,92,160,0.092,0.726,0.183,0.9091,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,3,1,10,14,2,0,3,1,13,2,1,8,2,31,29,14,0,2,7,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,6,0,1,3,6,4,0,0,2,3,24,10,16,25,2,14,0,0,0,1,11,6,0,5,6,86,31,0,0.1313750128814755,0.0,0.12820306149887872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933951380055488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18372092725584926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11619052281648468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341485767589921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196971709650302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17354391396191798,0.1188362205127263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13285430778067872,0.09385433545249487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863802192687722,0.0,0.07466344735890246,0.2203822555194267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768620685947626,0.2594112531350627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418319528566574,0.0,0.11600654327615526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857107834848818,0.0,0.17538768248415726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132450894683613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991661728117128,0.0,0.0,0.2917528092406108,0.0,0.0,0.09107889227523278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146989034460935,0.0,0.22262724417288687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908280775356011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907528312867622,0.0,0.07660582650105592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17839002012837804,0.0,0.0,0.54706408639316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15107478125910792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363795299086254,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mayluen,2020/01/04,"I'm not excited to see my friends anymore I got diagnosed with severe depression a while back and was pretty unwilling to do anything. I spent most of my time kinda just keeping to myself. Tired all the time and unable to get the thought of being dead out of my head. I've gotten a lot better since then, after attending sessions with my therapist and GP I no longer have those constant suicidal thoughts and whilst I'm not constantly sad I feel just kinda empty (which is a lot better than soul crushing sadness). 

But one thing I've noticed since then is I prefer being alone and doing my own thing. I like going for walks at night when there are less people and I can just kinda enjoy being out in the open by myself. I'm on holidays currently for a month and haven't seen my friends since I left but as I'm reaching the end of my holiday I don't feel as excited about seeing them as I did before I left. 

I still love them but I just don't feel great about seeing them. It's almost like I feel as if I'm not ready to see them for some reason. I feel like there's some sort of emotional barrier stopping me from letting myself be excited to see their faces again. 

I was pretty anxious about all my friends viewing me as a burden for the past three years and only recently stopped feeling that way so maybe this is linked to that? 

I'm not exactly sure what I want from this post either. I partially want to see if this is a normal feeling but at the same time I just want to get it off my chest since I can't really talk to anyone about it right now.",4.0300085763293305,4.913587261006292,5.0384676958261885,84.68439108061753,71.04402515723271,8.171755288736419,26.71869639794168,8.438071523408619,1.7075547169811325,1231,39,251,19,22,404,164,318,0.139,0.703,0.158,0.7665,1,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,5,2,17,19,0,0,12,0,21,6,3,1,4,64,54,24,2,7,16,0,7,3,3,0,2,0,0,0,13,13,0,4,12,2,1,3,9,4,0,2,9,15,39,15,42,40,11,40,1,3,8,1,10,11,0,12,27,175,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975599758696802,0.092834302940396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10126146423614242,0.08889333206737067,0.06267452197667715,0.0,0.07376155081516346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06892339271167168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627235209520712,0.0,0.0,0.1585488509015029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19372608852112408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720205792817446,0.0909771241340187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082674073975566,0.07938955633369207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172532519809549,0.06403490008225549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077541620424055,0.0,0.09366064667637916,0.0,0.050941348296521013,0.0,0.07168889273671639,0.09882234554605887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199084990603892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967125629895404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19477627895825636,0.09165734254943966,0.0,0.13137265776574986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15240808206592762,0.08089862996828556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004989643808202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154539756666804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411590016370314,0.08782277244703042,0.0,0.10204946496872998,0.0,0.0,0.060738652569736165,0.06817107140879218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855662664215261,0.0621412717732051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08584506753198723,0.18238100818886044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05742215177286169,0.09215918794489164,0.08850324876754627,0.0,0.0,0.07654736771361863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4285625179223602,0.0,0.0,0.10126146423614242,0.0,0.2965863171962689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158222231262241,0.14987690030340353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804558764656414,0.0,0.08447944936424903,0.0,0.0,0.07204481059907454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407255555754677,0.11909834926062947,0.0,0.0,0.14231955117347786,0.1567997819833261,0.10302166453738773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586062398875638,0.07114768881586894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057721675046148925
mentalhealth,vicncak,2020/01/04,"I just hope that one day, I die an accidental death, so that I no longer have to stress about life It's the new decade and rather than be hopeful or optimistic I'm left feeling down in the dumps about life. I feel so unaccompilshed. My life has no direction. I'm not good at anything. Nothing interests me anymore.

I wish I could go back to being a kid. Back then I was happy and care free. I was so blissfully ignorant. Ironic considering how my family situation was worse off back then compared to now, with me me having been a pawn for my divorced parents back in the late 00's early 10's Despite that I was still a happy kid living a happy life.

Now I'm a depressed 19 year old college student. I don't even know if I want to major in what I'm studying. I don't even think I'm smart enough for college. But what else can I do? Nothing else interests me. Whatever sounds somewhat interesting doesn't pay well. And unfortunately for me, financial freedom and material possessions are what bring me joy.  That and travelling, which requires money. I don't want to be someone who has life figured out past age 25. The idea of figuring life out that late terrifies me, after all the human lifespan is only 82 years where I live.

Every day I pray that I get killed accidentally, I'm too much of a coward to take my life myself. But then I would make my family sad. Maybe it would be good if I died, cause then it could put my broken family back together. 

I'm genuinely surprised anyone cares about me. I don't add any value to the world. I can't trust anyone just cause of how logically speaking, there is no reason to value my presence. 

Last year I got in a car accident and escaped completely unharmed. I should've died. I wish I had died. Now I'm stuck living a life I'm forced into with little to no motivation left in me. If my 9 year old self met me right now, he would think I was a pathetic loser. 

I used to be on antidepressants, but I don't know if I want to take them anymore. I might start again, but all they did was make me not care about life and ultimately my grades got worse. But hey, maybe it's better to be stupid and happy than stupid and depressed.",2.862728059867649,4.648386951945085,4.461525140701344,84.11201558537944,75.36155606407324,7.653386109221349,24.85428907168037,8.441846121484758,1.5969300389634482,1706,57,349,32,37,572,217,437,0.19,0.687,0.122,-0.9739,1,0,0,0,1,0,46.0,0,0,2,4,29,31,4,1,16,0,37,9,0,9,2,67,75,28,6,17,15,1,2,0,0,4,9,2,0,4,15,15,0,2,12,1,3,5,13,10,1,1,13,4,53,22,39,50,6,55,1,4,0,0,13,18,0,9,32,220,68,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04534622743683661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226177940502848,0.09325158149896397,0.0,0.05487382312935561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563727320899746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058975045301942815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20396104264161125,0.13700211108699006,0.0,0.0,0.06991508710139528,0.0,0.0,0.10648072665398202,0.0,0.0,0.08600909002434531,0.0,0.11486667579939285,0.0,0.2768226568827873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140895333754204,0.0,0.0,0.0689006059565706,0.0,0.08808601544848638,0.0,0.0561826849940102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18858631713132745,0.0,0.06743311442275537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03483873171796265,0.0,0.03789706839812733,0.11185984181799853,0.10666379914466834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839380479620568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246107194715126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527616159535731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377404740652102,0.0,0.07329365888134758,0.05435494666298911,0.15044100079566036,0.0,0.14490095399610536,0.0,0.4238969078364511,0.0,0.06683314848056605,0.17664498736713832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890218605543484,0.0,0.13398259758237846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.070739346397108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04901913798824945,0.0,0.0,0.06440214791907549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279668651022636,0.0,0.13994364177199434,0.0,0.04518562911697773,0.05071486802655077,0.0,0.0,0.07404276495558101,0.0,0.06365576804668946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703409498384677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856047524957153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05694629072347746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956414618401795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749536607366317,0.0,0.0,0.056499667495600286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719805100795847,0.0,0.05325254367593316,0.0,0.07638431027996669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027353047625896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545460693954338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575920678542669,0.0,0.0,0.11799278429776648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059955365252386365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15336262980431178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590985153244198,0.1421075054395707,0.0,0.0,0.17176477187414982
mentalhealth,shuptheupfuck,2020/01/04,"How to cope with chronic illness? (cw: self-harm, suicide mention)
I have been mildly to severely depressed for over a decade, since I hit puberty. I’ve been on antidepressants for three years now, and my current one has been working well for two of those years. 

After forgetting to take my meds for several days due to a changing schedule, I’ve fallen back into a depressive episode. This has made me realize that I don’t think I will ever be able to fully get off of antidepressants. 

This is especially difficult for me because I was raised by parents who are medical professionals who are not well-practiced in the mental side of things and have continuously expressed their desire in me getting off of medication eventually, because they don’t believe I need it. I couldn’t even seek treatment until I moved out and went to college at 18. 

Mostly, it’s difficult for me because I feel like the person I am without the medication, the “real me”, is a defective human who should not have lived as long as I have (and wouldn’t have lived that long without medication). I’m aware that many people take medicine every day for things they can’t control, whether they be physical or mental. I just don’t know why I’m having a hard time thinking about having to take medicine every day for the rest of my life just so I don’t jump off a building or hurt myself. Why am I not able to function normally in the first place? How do I cope with these thoughts of the future?",7.5675833333333316,7.1625410678571475,7.620000000000001,73.67833333333336,63.32142857142857,10.466666666666667,36.88095238095238,9.888512548439397,3.5721738095238083,1169,51,213,21,15,378,159,280,0.12,0.853,0.027000000000000003,-0.9754,2,0,0,0,0,3,28.0,0,0,4,3,11,8,0,0,13,0,31,7,0,4,1,38,47,13,1,6,10,1,2,1,0,3,7,0,0,2,14,8,0,1,6,0,0,4,12,6,1,4,7,2,28,2,43,33,2,36,0,3,0,0,12,13,0,3,20,155,42,3,0.2026766344377436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792291070029919,0.0,0.18532469276511004,0.0,0.0,0.1141735811084406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720250263622427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11365953973297943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19606449328907996,0.0,0.17456508825624684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669330027786328,0.0916663096526214,0.17076380588536447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05123969806160311,0.07239611406951521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.086198320857669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589017632412416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077922735407022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848476451173147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05569288891754156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157825038177518,0.049508782997019336,0.0,0.17896718141660312,0.17936244361566206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588876601049963,0.0,0.102741147982107,0.0,0.0,0.1125640253418685,0.4083507730652955,0.20425037746007935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770659366566206,0.0,0.07514107816463843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992900347124637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866946640377095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252420869026196,0.0,0.0,0.07025522947547078,0.08848470979440716,0.10587697273237512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534519077614827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571796592504627,0.2289669073042672,0.0,0.08382810320472593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084767116299828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285814085182153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464935008078166,0.12986700362389286,0.0,0.0804513042719063,0.05909118771148372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899281088943154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18223063484481308,0.09394163532704948,0.18288413824619176,0.0,0.0,0.19537304306541867,0.0,0.07377550186887162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051710756342594
mentalhealth,Isicium,2020/01/04,"can you start taking the same medications again after you‘ve abruptly stopped them? I had been on two antidepressants until late November. ... then, I stopped going to therapy and stopped taking the medication from one day to the other without decreasing the dosage. I knew you‘re not supposed to do that and it’s stupid but I did it and also stopped therapy because another low was approaching and I felt like I am not worth getting any treatment. now I am still in the low but I want to start with the medication again because others are noticing I cry a lot (although not in front of them), I struggle to focus and I sleep considerably less.
due to my insurance system I need to see my family doctor first before I can go back to my therapist. but she is on holiday and I got an appointment with her in two weeks time. However, I really really need to get back on medication because I am now realising it really helped me, especially with sleeping. since I won‘t be able to ask about the medication until that appointment, I wanted to ask you guys here whether it‘s probably possible to just get on the previous medications again? or is it possible that they work differently after having taken them for a while, then having stopped for like 1,5 months and then taking them again?

I know the advice here doesn‘t replace talking to a medical professional ... but I was thinking, maybe there‘s someone on this forum who has done the same stupid thing in the past and thus has some experience with it ...",5.670346320346319,7.597335345454546,6.423324675324677,72.33460606060609,68.27272727272728,10.183549783549783,32.73160173160173,10.398101306919678,3.839869264069265,1200,54,203,34,21,394,154,275,0.11,0.8490000000000001,0.040999999999999995,-0.9459,2,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,5,2,15,7,2,1,15,0,22,10,2,1,0,42,45,22,0,4,11,0,1,2,0,1,8,0,0,1,14,12,0,5,5,1,1,4,6,5,0,4,10,2,33,2,36,33,5,49,0,2,1,0,15,11,0,3,35,165,47,3,0.08284479698344656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095497680257525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625095421666148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05633730281788168,0.0868699930080594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15489740390795784,0.0,0.0,0.1274050703522703,0.0,0.1515042579105112,0.0,0.07049482042529669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100111939434148,0.05342804047526754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655518023149167,0.0,0.08479516014718035,0.0,0.0847789904132234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103810812000689,0.07809870159787526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07954399690315442,0.0,0.0,0.0704677419928355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984896139285462,0.0,0.09416521456957673,0.0,0.06625855216389409,0.0,0.0,0.0820293738540396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05552912112463186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04552933384348868,0.0,0.09345253946269128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094756630755984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043168383735074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322873366741318,0.0,0.0,0.5842019207229724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612592656672057,0.0,0.0,0.12285673448122933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431935045727123,0.0,0.0,0.05613777847618125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908473280487202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867901218787118,0.0,0.0,0.08932070305122666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921749492958354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601657724378354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853007215921719,0.0,0.16580925301010432,0.0,0.07019412764254664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727594740942693,0.0,0.06615996188596733,0.3463097991130541,0.0,0.0866073693409745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868669315080682,0.066587509710159,0.0,0.0,0.18948049069244036,0.09618919455995112,0.05503840194673193,0.05308360078070428,0.0,0.0,0.0483074673412571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618546576660231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772801539102692,0.0,0.06645309901900033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985942796856799,0.0,0.060311998880719114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NossamJay,2020/01/04,"Is there any way I don’t have mental health issues? (Really long and rambling/semi coherent babbling. Please help) Good evening, 

I am now 18 years old, and to be honest I never thought I would make it to the age of 18. 16 was a big milestone too. To start out, I was homeschooled my entire life along with my sister and spent a lot of it walking on eggshells trying not to make my mother get angry because she would go into a rage at the drop of a hat or get really depressed. Knowing what I do about her past NOW makes it a little more understandable. Probably PTSD and a whole lot of other crap. 

But I don’t need to bring that up now. I’m 18, but I’ve been suicidal as long as I can remember. It got really bad from about age 13-16 to the point of several suicide attempts and a fair bit of probably brain damage from overdoses, slamming my head into things, suffocation, etc. I have been struggling to shower, brush my teeth, change clothes, more than once or twice a week for most of my life. I don’t know why, it’s just never been easy to do like most things in my life. Despite that, at my job I’m one of the hardest workers there, and have been told I will be offered a promotion soon after only working at target for about 3 months. In my volunteer job I have taught classes, mentored cadets aged 12-19, and taken on various staff roles including supply, and now commanding a squadron of 150 cadets. 

What I am saying is I don’t have any problem handling responsibility, but when I’m home I can’t clean, read, work out, or do much of anything worthwhile except research on my various business ideas/projects. Basically at home I’m a complete loser, but anything that doesn’t involve home I excel at. If I excel at home it’s despite being at home. I don’t know why. It’s just that things went downhill at home for years in my mental state. Suicidal all the time, homocidal urges even for the only person I actually care about (my father), and I’ve been a pathological liar for over a decade and I don’t know why. 

I think I’m a hypochondriac because I’ve been told so for years by my mother. I don’t feel emotional connection to anyone except my father somewhat. Anyone in my life could die, except my father, and I wouldn’t be happy, but I wouldn’t be upset. Anytime I’m away from anyone I know I forget about them until I see them again. I have memories of things like being raped, about hallucinations, about seeing demons, but I don’t know if they actually happened. I’m super paranoid a lot of the time, and my boss accuses me of anxiety all the time now. 

To sum up because I can’t get my thoughts together and my memory seems to be failing like always, I used to struggle with extreme suicidal and homocidal urges (but don’t anymore for some reason after snapping and losing the ability to socially connect with anyone), and every year feels like it’s become worse although it doesn’t affect me emotionally anymore because I’ve sort of cut off my emotions. I’m constantly paranoid of people, of being mentally ill, of being sick, and of hurting people emotionally. I feel like I’m emotionally delayed by about 2 years. My memory is becoming increasingly horrible. I still have suicidal urges sometimes, but I don’t want to act on them anymore although I still have them every time something in my life starts to go wrong. I feel sane for the first time in my life and not depressed, but everything at home goes so badly because I have no motivation when I’m home. I can excel outside of my home. My hygiene is awful, showering maybe once a week, rarely brushing teeth, but I can still pass off clean cut when I need to. It’s not that I can’t but I just can’t seem to be able to keep up with a hygiene routine. 

What do I do? Am I insane/mentally ill? Things I do often lose meaning for a chunk of time then regain meaning. Any thoughts on if I need treatment? What do you think I’m struggling with? Any solutions to make me normal? Is anyone normal?",5.23,5.8268301790281365,6.187605115089514,78.55707519181587,68.18158567774935,8.966997442455241,30.98526854219949,9.010732273442466,2.5495092787723785,3128,120,596,53,50,1039,322,782,0.201,0.713,0.086,-0.9987,5,0,1,0,0,1,93.0,0,1,5,15,32,35,6,4,28,1,67,17,5,9,4,112,127,46,8,15,26,6,4,5,0,5,11,1,13,1,25,28,0,2,23,1,1,8,24,22,0,3,18,9,82,13,107,93,18,90,1,8,2,1,23,34,1,17,50,396,107,18,0.0473037794272349,0.0,0.09232333013752743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039360533910221054,0.0,0.0,0.12867276850493858,0.0,0.0361872617856967,0.0,0.1407379148613281,0.16537951221588792,0.0,0.07785395985078979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04444345791708537,0.0,0.07899335988310892,0.14417972440517762,0.1044866158163608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05164347556308259,0.0,0.0,0.052806662139924805,0.0,0.0,0.04822935575770132,0.0,0.05004112637669846,0.0,0.04959711273739,0.051118580585325785,0.0,0.03776821872908287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148535181154085,0.0,0.049093854741852405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26605192470496497,0.0,0.0,0.0527562182507453,0.06248740035823926,0.0,0.07971094872544568,0.0,0.042513586783893415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956728487918017,0.06758765894911732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040236570615659085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414281707770319,0.0,0.05376765592904456,0.039676165870950963,0.03783315369044905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041830575924373205,0.05035575281049582,0.0,0.0,0.04854732483303816,0.05028170550670038,0.0,0.0,0.03170672622920002,0.0,0.42704592911946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050639674236891766,0.0,0.0,0.049372855814305436,0.09388340397724916,0.0420457726323023,0.0,0.0,0.15598152043501307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20047235009047534,0.11555118610977433,0.04741081413483941,0.0,0.08372471245994895,0.0,0.10584165868181336,0.0,0.12064794500962435,0.0,0.0,0.12630256035018558,0.0,0.04752300449475494,0.10305536674877737,0.0,0.0,0.14301325108497734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03775742543443854,0.0,0.034773720721637584,0.10522545918384588,0.0729671817595668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269532059066432,0.0,0.0,0.049637359156690576,0.10075396252331063,0.03205426517132827,0.07195331168870123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045156809997506236,0.0655889691071079,0.041303835604032016,0.0,0.05192534475274471,0.044717361491471035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200294983558286,0.04526332839690834,0.0552955867566764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04731658050175255,0.0,0.09091203715075573,0.048636163684535764,0.0,0.0,0.05358596077036305,0.0,0.0,0.03761786403521947,0.0,0.0,0.07538997552507573,0.08612716836969557,0.0,0.05343980626727925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04822024602065418,0.0,0.03641676045665115,0.04678464740804331,0.0,0.0669637170996268,0.0,0.11333057806611813,0.0,0.0,0.14835654302697346,0.0,0.25871328489657713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15713264565280546,0.06062070362814868,0.0,0.11266175094536425,0.1654992851456279,0.0,0.0,0.09040157680331104,0.0,0.032116161129460336,0.0,0.0,0.04924490264113375,0.0,0.040855277459712784,0.0,0.0,0.027900994704847124,0.03754753829964517,0.07588847707307675,0.0,0.0,0.04385107744533316,0.1280529099025743,0.052812980415154726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887542961664178,0.0,0.04820659251128888,0.06720649538674459,0.05171925693198064,0.0,0.15231041517904853
mentalhealth,Eel-Buggy,2020/01/04,"Is this normal? !TW! Self harm
I don’t know if this is like a normal thing or not but does anyone else get insecure about the size of their cuts when they compare them to other examples of cutting in media/images?",2.346860465116279,4.419332000000004,3.6955232558139532,87.71444767441862,77.83720930232559,6.16046511627907,20.05232558139535,7.1686216300943375,0.5193767441860468,168,4,33,2,4,55,39,43,0.242,0.72,0.037000000000000005,-0.8656,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,3,0,2,5,2,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,5,4,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,4,1,5,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,2,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307064951061023,0.3380695185363466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887386943105688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27562823852192986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723836005651499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813301488533555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16119535482689562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.64655567789715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34420650230670097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21920201274983087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unreliablenarrator09,2020/01/04,"Mood Swings, Loss of Motivation, Anxiety, and Self-Loathing Where do I start? I'm a college student, and the last semester was the most turbulent one so far. During the last two weeks of my semester, I spent several sleepless nights, lost appetite, experienced panic attacks, and worked obsessively on a project that I was convinced I had messed up (this one really mattered to me because it was for a course that was very relevant to the field I wanted to pursue my career in). To add to the pressure, the professor whose lab I am currently working in recently recommended me for a grad program in her home country, and because of that I felt so much more afraid of failing. As I waited for my grade, I had completely given up on anything positive and genuinely thought I'd fail. More importantly, I felt so ashamed because I felt that I don't deserve to pursue the field I'm interested in. For whatever reason, I ended up getting an A and even received encouraging feedback. This is not humblebrag; I cannot, for the life of me, figure out how that happened and I genuinely feel like I don't deserve it. I don't think the prof. would have taken pity on me because he doesn't know me personally so I'm still struggling to figure out why I got that grade. That said, I'd be lying if I said I didn't feel nice when I saw the really positive feedback. The next few days, I felt happy and optimistic, and even started working on the grad program that my lab prof. recommended I apply for. However, I don't know why but lately I've been feeling extremely anxious even though there's no reason to feel this away. Given these relatively encouraging developments, I should be positive, motivated, and raring to go but I'm experiencing the same old feelings of helplessness and shame. I don't want to continue my application for this program, don't even want to go to grad school, just want to be done with school and get away from everything. I am feeling extremely unmotivated, just don't want to do this anymore. Reflecting on this experience as well as several experiences in my past, I've realized that I find my equilibrium when I'm in a state of anxiety, embarrassment, and self-hate. That has become my normal.  Why should I be feeling this way when things haven't been as bad recently?",7.456666666666663,7.381495777777778,8.173981481481484,68.51916666666668,63.444444444444436,11.922222222222226,38.37037037037037,11.45678717892309,4.608512037037037,1824,88,324,51,24,613,204,432,0.131,0.759,0.11,-0.6028,2,0,0,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,0,9,19,26,1,8,20,0,34,1,0,5,0,61,76,29,0,10,6,0,11,1,0,3,1,2,1,1,22,17,0,1,24,0,1,3,13,17,1,3,24,16,43,8,52,45,6,45,0,6,1,0,9,20,0,2,21,217,65,26,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830071224705242,0.09473451247900794,0.08316358586716142,0.0,0.0,0.06900714510580815,0.0,0.0,0.09539941471410872,0.1575727762783578,0.0,0.07001707117141226,0.20447373379413455,0.09261344025497624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792244253362734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408081137099925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581479964408763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427238952083681,0.0,0.0,0.22154696367763504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536524173689127,0.1640564243088606,0.0,0.0,0.296804242220985,0.05990743948544702,0.3220633849902242,0.0,0.07664375568417874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762361642987647,0.0,0.0953157024204236,0.0,0.06706808315288727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415444579068416,0.08926730888874218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411538291000274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217120049823928,0.13670925325357036,0.09459432002119224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0592306611802802,0.04096828206199225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153979379021898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616445251161505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918284393656377,0.07869409013440996,0.0821620306903951,0.0,0.0,0.08799378869256354,0.0,0.11364731259282056,0.0,0.0,0.09838809182305344,0.0,0.0,0.08005097097143246,0.0,0.07322067579906068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744185055455777,0.1724378727145527,0.16559729188291386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159534371998954,0.0,0.0,0.16973547062555494,0.0,0.0,0.17496222629015676,0.18946902495801587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870879661290228,0.0,0.06696828832275421,0.0,0.0,0.0876655172640271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055710847850022005,0.053732163395429515,0.08238905188361825,0.06657307100166551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819160793928595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919078634536932,0.2473050817047475,0.06656176330080962,0.06726500693448642,0.0,0.07539749107857976,0.0,0.22700362966260296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18314662895334768,0.0,0.0,0.059569588857063926,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRA22221,2020/01/04,"2020 might be the end I hate how that sounds so dramatic and ominous but that’s the best way I could put it. 2019 was one of the worst years of my life and 2020 is already rearing up to top that. There’s nothing for me to live for except the guilt trips my parents and friends keep putting me through because they think suicide is selfish. I can’t talk to any of them about how I feel because they’ll just get all upset and cry until I feel bad and promise not to hurt myself or fly into a rage and threaten to put me into a 51/50. I don’t have any active plans yet but I can only live on borrowed time for so long and the day will come soon that the guilt trips and crying won’t be enough. And before anyone asks yes I’m seeing a therapist and taking antidepressants- clearly I’m beyond help at this point.

Just wanted a place to vent",4.368716883116882,4.61565961714286,4.7745454545454535,89.16727272727276,69.97142857142858,7.049350649350648,26.766233766233768,6.1124844417494595,0.8341428571428571,663,19,144,3,11,210,115,175,0.231,0.617,0.152,-0.9602,2,0,0,0,0,3,8.0,0,0,3,3,11,12,2,3,10,1,14,1,0,2,2,31,27,18,1,2,7,1,2,0,1,4,1,1,0,0,6,13,0,1,3,0,1,6,4,9,0,1,1,4,16,3,22,19,4,24,0,1,1,0,8,9,0,2,8,95,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15846003601369155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19529828747747888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040457167402617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13424141822924504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989536004015675,0.17506767650981456,0.0,0.1221882928048428,0.0,0.15069350644098478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369389594177164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11464847651244292,0.0,0.3154635008654952,0.09260653497938898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718205337156893,0.14837144245595849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452113274955572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094070868290153,0.0,0.07502216862342892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176978174172095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624832675986696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372081865950968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763333665958893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142500005806786,0.0,0.0,0.2535930438192563,0.12707656136538933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523310095407037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13778273861450185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730330927120973,0.10921004276516573,0.0,0.0,0.15944463314026053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15002562801204464,0.0,0.13574316028586056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4330562218604668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442617800246699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570690118042665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796514885726677,0.11541577217339198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16672421319248767,0.0,0.09200951951074893,0.0,0.0,0.08373107312769018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469572152814464,0.11397858325608815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247011188170803
mentalhealth,bambinash,2020/01/04,"Short term memory 28F I’ve been diagnosed with MDD; GAD, and PTSD, I’ve also found out recently I have a vitamin D and magnesium deficiency. I’m almost done with my tms treatments which have helped my depression tremendously. My anxiety is still pretty bad, and I’m guessing that could be contributed to what’s going on. 
I’ve noticed I’m having a lot of trouble remembering things, I feel so scattered brained lately. I get my days mixed up, I can’t remember the shows I’ve watched hours earlier, or just certain information just doesn’t stick. I’m losing things. I don’t even remember what I ate the day before unless I really really think hard about it. One of my biggest problems is retaining information during a conversation, usually when I’m upset I can’t even recall what was said seconds earlier. It’s like my brain shuts down. I can’t stay focused during long conversations, I easily get distracted and will start thinking about something else. My attention to details sucks. Is there something I can do to increase my memory?",4.697144163364829,7.123192777202071,6.017957939652543,72.13767144163366,72.00518134715027,10.137031392868028,31.56019506248095,10.328600350310266,4.01295269734837,838,39,138,27,17,281,124,193,0.141,0.768,0.092,-0.8526,0,0,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,11,10,1,2,5,0,19,5,2,0,1,28,36,9,0,2,4,0,2,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,9,7,1,1,10,1,0,2,5,8,0,2,6,4,19,2,14,27,3,21,0,2,1,0,6,7,1,4,12,83,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335942811290413,0.0,0.0,0.10669067377784014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206091070204228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139464346361364,0.0,0.0,0.11352500470297015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297867026306258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651976990996627,0.0,0.0,0.17208125390297987,0.0,0.11490879392882553,0.13541182566764165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365282616128281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114498036249206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17623662784250194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745784010251879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628094257451207,0.0,0.0,0.13940602410093136,0.0,0.07582192820957454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469699370738844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951223046081855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894242115774437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13138535693355285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504961629521291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517906415193937,0.0,0.0,0.11806668949606047,0.0,0.14925550514504915,0.0,0.11342332941107988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518920771716788,0.0,0.0,0.0904043946360042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357294238581236,0.0,0.12765863703509106,0.15595316317690625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17093612222503954,0.0,0.13172966948786666,0.0,0.4533942349207125,0.0,0.12690672568628478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20541635667460212,0.0,0.0,0.09443071420622344,0.14220096783434236,0.10654413954018033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772679127956061,0.17097188110908446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14693604740273367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sph523,2020/01/04,Been having awful anxiety lately and I feel like I’m losing it I’ve been having terrible anxiety the past couple days and I don’t know what to do. I truly don’t know how to stop it because I have no one to talk to about this in real life. I just have no idea what my next step should be. I feel so trapped in my own head and I just want it to stop so badly. I haven’t been able to get any work done because my anxiety has been that bad. I feel completely hopeless and alone,1.1045085470085496,2.5574589807692334,3.212820512820514,92.60995726495727,79.38461538461539,6.545299145299146,20.20940170940171,7.3871296695380915,0.37430042735042734,370,9,87,5,9,126,60,104,0.337,0.606,0.055999999999999994,-0.9839,0,2,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,2,6,6,0,0,1,1,16,2,1,1,0,18,24,7,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,6,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,5,3,12,1,9,17,1,9,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,7,58,19,1,0.17184648700007854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798113434325144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686150402718774,0.0,0.3943862765716228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869692772250165,0.2095120469076445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18017777210334696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901448692931656,0.0,0.1108267676098874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17585862002699873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606722417093219,0.1227671646494078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897826967553538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763640733747804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19399376659679987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18888467016270585,0.0,0.19385032244219988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138025587254805,0.08395551324689457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922522623240866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827606884804729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644762701329305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640469166768876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955989241899869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28734271581677023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381236968214294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135951042159763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510628921783934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TryToLaughEveryDay,2020/01/04,"I Have Unsubscribed From All Porn Related Sub Reddits Due to the fact that my mental illness has consisted of me being trapped in my home a majority of the time. The last 10 years of me doing this has been from 14 on. So you could imagine the amount of sexual frustration i have and, being in my early twenties now. It has definitely become a need for me. As i am sure it would be for most of the people in the world.

For me, when i found out that there was a wide variety of different sub reddits related to porn. I became overwhelmed with the amount of options i could choose from. Regular porn had become stale to the point where i couldn't even get hard watching even the most hardcore anal scenes which kept me a bay for a couple years.

I guess maybe i got off the the thought that their were so many women willing to expose themselves in a different and more real way. It came to the point that when scrolling though my home page that, the vast majority of posts were naked women. So many different faces and, so many different positions and, so many different fetishes. I have finally realized that this plus porn on the side that i was watching was really taking a tole on my mental state.

As it stands i am almost 24 and am having a very hard time staying hard. When i masturbate i don't give myself the death grip due to some quick research that scared the shit out of me. I have researched porn addiction on multiple occasions through the years but just either ended up not caring or lying to myself that it wasn't a problem. I think i am at the same stand point i was at when i decided that i needed to lose weight or i as going to die a very early death.

With the constant stress of having bipolar 1 with psychotic features. Maybe it is the new year maybe not but, i am sick of not having any self control when it comes to pornography. And please if any of you reading this have a porn addiction i hope you can release you're self from the beast that is porn. I know that this is going to be a hell of a challenge but i feel that i am ready now. FUCK PORN!",5.464721549636806,5.671337728813563,5.881371428571431,82.31998450363199,67.5956416464891,9.31986440677966,29.59506053268765,9.174902378510234,2.2740931525423727,1634,54,331,28,25,526,194,413,0.109,0.815,0.077,-0.9665,5,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,3,1,3,19,13,4,3,34,0,41,18,3,1,3,56,61,27,3,9,11,0,6,0,0,2,5,0,2,4,25,14,1,3,9,1,0,4,6,9,0,0,14,8,43,4,54,38,12,55,1,2,2,9,9,22,3,10,23,238,68,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794509424684152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241737005767277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119415333235249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18180058021865872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941359091482518,0.0839162489072526,0.0,0.0,0.07089915919554175,0.0,0.08894333056685434,0.09231295375880652,0.13142896867939974,0.0910698026671222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854204264106501,0.4299602176345168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289850950326209,0.0,0.0,0.10872440984642076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04161628569751718,0.0,0.0,0.09016198126826673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024406190638903,0.0,0.0760903862167022,0.04300138366513385,0.07895522353456016,0.09355256621649442,0.0,0.06582746736207659,0.0,0.0906691183844251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211894919691876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651188572225777,0.08174823098622615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04523311542011815,0.06709021253916551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207913764513907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337806528191305,0.2480617174758055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658897765553782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220574162150411,0.0,0.07949145491134481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057060478734295414,0.0,0.0,0.09034705287703196,0.2334167549062484,0.0,0.07882620536365094,0.0,0.0,0.07875553534673026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232807352379133,0.0936820198941006,0.05272720330010495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240246456867778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17172580010162006,0.0,0.08448572134990827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772703209684407,0.0,0.0,0.09428101628200024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757224283285845,0.0,0.0618837188215424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273823353715654,0.08086503100883442,0.06534161187468925,0.0959863482040895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582181019020628,0.0,0.0653305133420633,0.0,0.10022629158192947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058467679139147785,0.0,0.0,0.212008947837394
mentalhealth,cortavefabiola,2020/01/04,"Help? I don't know when it all started, suddenly I started to feel anguish, constant fear that something bad is going to happen to me or my loved ones.

I had never had trouble sleeping and now I wake up at night. I have started taking muscle relaxants (not prescribed) so I can sleep well.

When I am with my boyfriend, family, and friends out of nowhere I start to feel empty and all I want is to go home, socializing is being very difficult, even with close people.

I don't know what's wrong with me, I thought it would help me write it.",4.700707610146863,5.343368523364486,5.259279038718294,84.58168224299068,69.37383177570094,7.983444592790388,31.173564753004012,7.957251820313856,2.0479676902536723,420,17,85,5,7,135,72,107,0.13,0.677,0.193,0.6578,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,2,0,0,12,4,3,0,3,21,27,7,0,2,2,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,5,8,0,0,5,1,0,2,4,6,1,1,3,2,16,4,12,22,2,17,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,1,11,60,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436660344842888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18593977448298588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364647646314348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16220637931394136,0.193619542303736,0.17400119217706805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293601749067596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19557557552361388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215539564696234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23066139384721546,0.0,0.17259395886787224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18912346157439605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529424175252798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270616247243386,0.0,0.0,0.1614701626019447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659484220666225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11928733138423712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3443760016139624,0.17539731283478469,0.0,0.13246307211930733,0.0,0.0,0.487150398679941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293705177050585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659938860960746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14197060417956334,0.10148765094544722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15470596487541727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222914303287948,0.18812468695816387,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mrkaganovich,2020/01/04,"I don't understand how to fix myself When I was young my mom worked 24/7 to make ends meet and my dad practically raised me. These days I've come to realize that my dad has had depression since I was born. Is this the reason for the emptiness inside me even when everything seems to be going great? I'm doing better these days but I still feel like there's this disconnect in me that came from never learning about my emotions, etc. Or who knows :/ maybe it's just something that came about with no reason",3.8012999999999977,5.528013129999998,4.035,88.39750000000002,72.7,7.4,22.5,8.07648339933343,0.9916,403,10,82,6,8,125,74,100,0.099,0.826,0.075,-0.3506,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,9,4,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,4,1,19,18,6,0,0,3,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,8,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,5,1,12,3,10,12,1,14,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,2,10,54,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655153594150046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4280901561665815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16120964043752714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413872744896057,0.0,0.16118850805797516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105139726626168,0.1657557386969903,0.0,0.20871717238911566,0.12360811621039633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681946871073943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946266010734866,0.1336970837941022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635934003232417,0.0,0.0,0.20632903926186286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285050423002684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914300441946475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249213558888101,0.0,0.18801323238214407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21918304154047105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433847192832372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3848343530555127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17037061832753894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480904027115747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440740735804468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945497474666533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19482550445490904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13624445983168948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunflowerxx09,2020/01/04,I’m starting to become vulnerable again and it’s weirdly making me sad. Right now I’m on the verge of tears just thinking about NYE and how open and honest I was about my feelings to others. Something I’m learning is to accept my emotions as they are. I have accepted rejection and loss. It’s hard and I’m always hiding feelings because I think they make me weak. Something is changing within me and it makes me really sad. I don’t like being vulnerable even though it’s healthy.,2.9852514619883053,5.2869535368421054,4.30140350877193,83.02426900584798,76.78947368421053,6.32748538011696,27.39766081871345,7.3871296695380915,1.683257309941521,386,16,70,5,9,127,62,95,0.247,0.627,0.126,-0.8731,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,2,1,8,10,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,4,0,19,19,9,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,12,4,9,17,0,8,0,4,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,46,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19723740109754528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14449821334996135,0.2617935595094285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507583290675539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666396259029423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15656358315810906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397104685410937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123424995272291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158064354208993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4746808467891644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15185476546124962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20243202687366466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3649720405340603,0.0,0.0,0.1677790951551585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037730652636217,0.23289193337206246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,toafriadtoposttomain,2020/01/04,Venting I guess I just don’t know what I’m doing. I’m not sure what I’m doing in this subreddit here and I’m sorry if this is written poorly. I’m 16 2 weeks away from turning 17 and I’m just unsure of everything.I always act as the funny guy and crack jokes constantly but I get really anxious when talking to even close friends and doubt if they really like me and I feel like I have to constantly put on a performance of being the funny kid because my dad is in a wheelchair so we have carers who are people who look after my dad and I feel pressured to always be happy and I can never feel like I have privacy anywhere and I’m always up late doubting my selfworth it’s currently 5:07am. I know I’m all over the place I’m sorry. I’ve always been bullied as a kid and now I feel like I hate myself more then the bullies hated me I’m overweight got horrible acne and I just hate everything about me I don’t want to be a mess but i can’t talk to anyone about this and I hate that I’m on reddit posting all this.,-0.10444444444444656,2.1109028173515973,2.6062100456621025,90.8241400304414,89.31963470319636,5.253576864535769,19.52663622526636,6.775458762138228,0.3953330289193304,803,25,170,11,27,279,116,219,0.226,0.64,0.134,-0.9731,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,1,1,10,16,4,3,8,0,16,1,0,0,4,35,44,20,0,3,8,2,4,4,1,0,1,0,0,3,10,13,1,0,6,1,1,2,5,8,0,0,3,5,24,8,20,38,3,22,0,0,1,0,12,9,0,5,14,107,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3908124371306898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265153475016733,0.0,0.0821030151267743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032025215098153,0.0,0.0,0.07157833479614785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537792945946923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755501132068952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552980874241877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374849594827943,0.2516552917013715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071864489138233,0.0,0.06134726878105115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09391175327950033,0.0,0.12935171619094366,0.11626457366586256,0.0,0.12499610983624185,0.0,0.4637130099075402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906226976748425,0.0,0.13245523095123482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294625411327364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860349240324358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056178645549703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814044625388772,0.0,0.12267923861143433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11245620478382758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803984931943586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15044492233617976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26288486090628616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066725824627074,0.0,0.0,0.1887560044453971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12771958574850326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925754465020248,0.0,0.09418749483528993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DaGofman,2020/01/04,"Weird reaction to stressful situations Sorry for my bad English, I am not a native speaker.

Last few months have been really difficult and stressful for me. I lost interest in many things, became easily irritated, started to isolate myself from friends and family, started overeating a lot (because right now food is the only thing that really brings me pleasure).

But the main thing that conserns me is the way I started to react to stressful situations. Whenever I feel stressed or angry or really sad, I start to scream, laught, mumble, pull out my hair and jump aroud the room. I also feel out of control. That doesn't last long but it really scares me. I live with my grandmother and it scares her as well. I feel really guilty that she has to deal with my mood swings and sudden bursts of anger.

I am a college student and I am not able to afford therapy right now. I don't know what is happening with me and whether my behavior is normal or not. Sometimes I simply cannot control myself. So, I would be really happy to get some advice because I don't want to scare my loved ones anymore.",5.220144927536231,6.710797294685992,5.9813719806763315,76.7584347826087,68.80676328502415,9.191497584541064,30.22512077294686,9.558583805096642,2.937625700483092,868,34,152,19,15,284,123,207,0.193,0.7070000000000001,0.1,-0.9179999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,3,5,21,1,7,7,0,16,3,1,3,0,33,30,16,0,3,9,0,4,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,10,12,1,2,4,0,0,3,7,14,1,1,2,6,29,6,22,26,4,22,0,2,0,1,5,7,0,5,11,110,39,2,0.09960890755913247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973366716366109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965720738733115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878527058675757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831692771450273,0.12144133102318608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234397194897872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269240988101208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390241308099814,0.0,0.15109576972407826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044748640699222,0.0,0.07695759488960713,0.0,0.052041542993599685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808382799107185,0.10603553431680633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054742450596518714,0.16238910856897218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.087956490294498,0.08815074868030996,0.0,0.0,0.10873488925149236,0.0846839311585316,0.08990092806351749,0.0,0.0,0.10098779802871076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950687968928892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09759558043435763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749757366085779,0.0757570627480012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38287210088538104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013092560334958,0.0,0.0,0.2991776801433354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22392917109217972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851575656915323,0.11150401691107326,0.2820147898183502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4564066682624704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391146679624067,0.0,0.19852719632386207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05875191445618105,0.0790649144074314,0.0,0.0,0.08956037044455027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075931001083244,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ilovesalmonfish,2020/01/04,"I think I have mild OCD   
Every time I’m at my house, I always walk around and check to see if the piano, the couch, the shoes, the food table(?), the dining table, and the kitchen look nice. I do this at least five times a day and every time I do it, I don’t move anything around. The most I do is fold a blanket but that’s about it. I realize there is no point in doing this but I can’t help but do it because I can’t handle the urge. When I’m in my room, I constantly look around the room at least ten times a day. I look at my coat rack, backpack, bed, bookshelf, drawers, desk, and bathroom. Most of the time, I look around my room and get upset by how my room is decorated and yet I don’t fix anything because I know there is no problem. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s because I want an even more minimalistic room or maybe it’s because I want a more modern room or maybe it’s because I want a bolder room. I have no idea. I am indecisive. When I get upset by how my room looks, I sit and tell myself that my room is “hipster themed”, minimalistic, and relaxing looking. I don’t know why I have to convince myself of this. Maybe it’s because I’m insecure about my room because other people’s rooms look better. I’ve been in quite a few other people’s rooms and even if their style isn’t similar to my style, I still like it more than my room for some strange reason. If someone’s room is not my style, and my room is my style because it is my room, then why do I like their room better than mine? It makes no sense.  
When I am out in public, usually in a mall or clothing store, I constantly check if my outfit is well put together. Over and over and over again. For at least five times. Even when I know nobody around me cares.  
When I am on my computer, I check if my wallpaper and Google wallpaper look good. There is no point to this. I’ve had the same wallpapers for a long time. Actually, I changed it for a bit but then I didn’t like it so I changed it back, but I’m still not happy. Then I check to see if I have too many windows or tabs open. Sometimes I close important tabs just because I think there are too many tabs. What does that even mean? I don’t get myself. When I go on my phone, I check to see if I should delete any apps. Every. Single. Time. Why? Why do I do this? I don’t even delete anything every time. I don’t have that many apps.  
I also worry about forgetting things and if my style is good. I get upset that I don’t have a word to describe my style. Why? Why do I need a word to describe my style? There is no point!  
There’s no point in checking if the living room and kitchen look good. There’s no point in my room looking good. There’s no point in my outfit looking good if I’m just going shopping for clothes. There’s no point in having the right amount of windows, tabs, and apps. There is no point in having a word for my style. Yet I still do these things every day. In the morning, during the day, and the night. Every. Single. Day. It’s annoying, it kind of hurts my head, and it’s distracting. I don’t know if I have OCD. I think I do. But I don’t want to self diagnose. But this does not seem normal. I don’t know if I should ask my doctor about this. I have a family doctor but I don’t know what they’ll say about what I do. Will they say that I don’t have OCD and then I will feel like an idiot? And I go on doing all of these stupid but harmless(?) routines every day? Or will I have to take medications and feel like I’m a weak person? Or will I have to go to a therapist and worry about the insurance coverage? All I know is that I want to stop doing these stupid routines for no reason and not having enough willpower to stop doing them.",0.7292008503005931,2.609729089514069,2.479474872953133,95.3746442687747,82.27365728900256,5.4434118311356166,18.97937356760886,6.511939984929285,-0.14100935330653994,2836,69,664,27,77,935,231,782,0.132,0.773,0.095,-0.9854,1,0,0,0,0,8,103.0,0,0,5,3,48,33,4,6,34,0,73,11,2,5,2,109,126,64,0,22,33,0,2,5,0,7,5,2,25,2,40,31,4,2,19,3,8,7,33,13,1,3,3,18,104,20,64,116,18,106,0,1,14,0,14,58,0,23,45,440,144,4,0.0,0.0,0.043330284217159315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035508539756251296,0.0369463085598938,0.0,0.0,0.030195117648065883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096180413793849,0.19763750726245,0.04151019928572285,0.0,0.0,0.03414266299438333,0.0,0.2436053199021153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854053277850385,0.04847586131862683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045271150628528566,0.0,0.09394358826611547,0.0,0.0,0.09596632280228314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17181503769231982,0.0,0.0,0.04506744614996246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089536447662587,0.07771358376164694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04587949252844865,0.0,0.14663665259261216,0.0,0.2618762387409082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04185857975012132,0.0,0.044902320181028715,0.06344208917670477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053691492583048166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279357180471744,0.0,0.1009395050904444,0.1862129042869796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047267122578822485,0.0,0.0,0.0455696166909223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02976195631289196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051234345281188615,0.0475336293454816,0.0501248435414542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046238210154089535,0.19521894348209415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846371612263173,0.0,0.03920808467783713,0.039294678620078266,0.4101546604172829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029638910496275057,0.13505102772793412,0.17843249705517775,0.04836717138210135,0.0,0.04473069185610759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0471926664026112,0.0,0.03292377666277314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041668593474101685,0.043504871204397326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06156599136291902,0.03877041552369339,0.0,0.0,0.3357965497961251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04248704809783376,0.0,0.04463662136587386,0.0,0.04722736016768972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130601301075024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0379193605556599,0.0,0.07062105484541911,0.0,0.0,0.10614876202234344,0.04042222782387591,0.04632133028132247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03762196335919202,0.0,0.04391505519071593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106379311725104,0.07424469830016557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03338503797184653,0.0,0.03880960719111157,0.0,0.0,0.05155454558411237,0.05899789087579885,0.08535369057005543,0.0,0.0,0.23302228328682786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048902910592641465,0.0,0.1309482693812696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03992304122653295,0.0,0.280463474100806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018547465191334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RedBabyx,2020/01/04,"Mood swings ? So I'm a sixteen year old girl, which is probably relevant cause hormones are insane, but for quite a while I've had such a fucking time with mood swings and I really don't know what to do at this point

I can feel so devistatingly sad to the point of crying in public for no real reason, which literally feels the same as it did to lose a family member. like the whole world is closing in on me and there's no escape, and it's so lonely too. I feel so heartbreakingly alone and I can feel this heavy weight in my chest because of it

 But I can also get to feeling so happy that I barely even sleep (too excited, too energetic and don't see the point in sleeping when life is too awesome I guess), I get these strong urges to tell friends how much they mean to me out of the blue and can also concentrate on NOTHING during these moods because everything is too exciting

genuinely don't understand what's going on in my own brain or what to do, but it's tiring to constantly swing between these two moods and not feel like a normal person. Idk what to do so honestly anything will help and sorry if this is a stupid post or something",9.937489177489176,6.184040324675326,9.693593073593076,71.27943722943726,61.337662337662344,13.03722943722944,37.78787878787879,10.746095033038511,3.7241722943722952,909,28,184,16,9,299,134,231,0.145,0.6679999999999999,0.187,0.9402,0,3,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,3,18,18,2,0,11,0,19,8,4,3,0,34,35,26,0,2,7,0,7,2,1,1,2,0,0,2,17,11,1,0,10,0,0,1,6,6,0,1,2,9,13,8,27,32,4,23,0,4,2,1,7,15,1,4,8,128,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12889134066864966,0.0,0.19904319055655725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241069166501132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15172556749795346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13892592758633854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784311494855133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448485355684126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13670107368742354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219720491161171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184648375094412,0.0,0.11731917621539835,0.0,0.37755006824734016,0.0889061894123781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614877125872352,0.11505083497795307,0.13003863804268598,0.0,0.07072707468512844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370942939773541,0.0,0.0,0.13247797503219486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341535279101386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839376111086674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790181031178299,0.12159871549135486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392262833303603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355611379146392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914841274019722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193332123367386,0.11941190186833545,0.0,0.13058799561136766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866382084440447,0.0,0.0,0.3529327932877984,0.0,0.11918747158679753,0.0,0.1341767671747723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132366530894666,0.0,0.14164988702438233,0.07972503580745098,0.12795400959468306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991695162703141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490771878922661,0.0,0.0,0.09580670356940986,0.0,0.1393101516723654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108773665329417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725670485882025,0.14303549485005854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156831493674755,0.1295555049510687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15154501253817582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13894254996335487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014089454751433
mentalhealth,poppy0186,2020/01/04,Why am I always so anxious and irritable over little things???? Almost daily I get super anxious and upset about the littlest of things and I don’t know what is wrong with me....like yesterday I was watching a movie with my mother and she was flossing and I could only focus on that and not on the movie....I was getting super upset but I didn’t say anything....then my dad started eating peanuts and I just felt like jumping out of my skin or screaming....I got too upset and then went to my room and I cried....is there like a reason for this or am I just immature? I’m almost 19 and usually I have myself put together and I don’t mean to be rude but I can’t seem to stop myself from getting stuck and angry at the dumbest things.,0.5404666666666706,2.8745591800000017,2.685333333333336,90.65266666666668,87.2,4.666666666666667,20.333333333333336,6.139981653823899,0.21273333333333305,567,18,115,5,18,191,90,150,0.21899999999999997,0.7090000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.9677,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,2,6,9,1,3,5,0,13,2,1,1,0,31,25,18,0,1,7,2,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,6,15,1,1,5,0,0,3,5,5,0,0,8,4,19,4,15,15,0,15,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,5,7,81,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3522736540730469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463615496789418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974302217374312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404405497753259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17998796392707112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688900369579345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756989432563824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406820094464669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666915386284804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17187013473792995,0.17629639486453816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916049108287875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377865030122865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17682646332449303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18085283862114532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13988145812160124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16013128608469362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450178431673348,0.0,0.0,0.1470589285130055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505772189272747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937272235613656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630595678562077,0.1587209358574597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923172742034974,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MinervaMinkMink,2020/01/04,"I’m having a mental break down and everything is spiraling. I quit my job, dropped out of school, and was going to kill myself but the family that was supposed to adopt my cat backed out a few days ago. So that day, I gave my cat to a friend and said I’d be out of town. 

But the truth is, I just got in my car and started driving. I had nothing but $200 cash. After about 10 hours of driving I made it to Louisiana (?) and found a hostel. I had no idea I could ever be in this much pain or be this lost. Today was supposed to be the day I killed myself but instead I’ve just runaway from my own life and home. 

IDK what Im going to do. I should be looking for another job, without it I will be homeless. Ive lost all feeling and sense of purpose. It feels like there are holes in my stomach and in my throat. Im in a hostel even though I cant sleep. I dont know what to do or where to go",0.3071995464852648,1.8214813979591864,2.6240136054421757,95.64400226757373,81.95918367346937,5.375963718820863,20.5827664399093,6.139981653823899,-0.0729492063492061,678,19,166,5,18,232,112,196,0.13,0.792,0.077,-0.9256,2,0,0,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,0,3,11,8,2,0,8,0,23,5,3,1,3,31,39,16,2,2,9,0,2,1,1,2,2,1,1,0,9,11,0,0,5,0,1,6,4,5,0,0,12,4,22,3,26,18,4,29,0,2,1,0,3,11,0,2,11,116,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155059536271265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14378462819795018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543854118553528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948095368066882,0.0,0.0,0.2652975096142345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607062481259526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056794858818493,0.1240349196246957,0.0,0.0,0.12323663074696327,0.0,0.12926664758625386,0.0,0.13866625273231709,0.09796015814078134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15034746237154922,0.10594030516659424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23378919285990946,0.0,0.10966918446667917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754479047527862,0.0,0.1350377886557434,0.0,0.0,0.15479432231263154,0.2962311065080961,0.0,0.27214533669023605,0.0,0.30341089212117045,0.0,0.07535879896040769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968534957567798,0.06699100185251307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151481494041132,0.0,0.2993702536074081,0.0,0.0,0.12974838225838245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13818696993247082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080062644570913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13157249082688707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14590773490024272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14584638465207686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043465422774578,0.0,0.0,0.1387750310094499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722127152482824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705582969980432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472190801192374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997585353641242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13218094949652215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sheisbananas94,2020/01/04,Finding happiness where I am not where I think it should be So has anyone else found they are always chasing the next opportunity to find happiness? Like where your at isn’t going to cut it? I’m with some awesome people. But because of a situation that happened I don’t feel 100% anymore. I know it’s just the distorted thinking. But how does one make plans to learn to be ok with where your at?,2.228259493670887,4.573562759493671,3.646060126582281,86.51060917721522,79.63291139240506,6.481645569620253,25.064873417721518,7.645422480735847,1.3631886075949369,314,12,63,5,8,103,59,79,0.055999999999999994,0.72,0.225,0.9386,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,1,2,7,6,1,0,3,1,8,0,0,2,0,18,17,4,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,8,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,1,1,7,5,9,13,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,2,43,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17966050757453586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141319633912288,0.15097441094120925,0.22123281095631847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162119460917354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18895070236069386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18037121551551324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917428492105266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3946890388431737,0.0,0.0,0.2367421974803729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271078915416693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19093497359182146,0.4596960056419484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866251271524353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054862964749104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14412648817363533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296305200626357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14631116447112394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14968988362748786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427001150157639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767022014538911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,do-you-wanna-go-bro,2020/01/04,"Hey you!! You may not believe this, but you are loved!!!! You are loved. You matter. No matter how many times you fall down I know that you will get right back up and try again. 

Life isn't always perfect but sometimes things just work out for the best if you have faith. Faith is infectious. 

And, if you're going through hell, just keep on going. 

Anyway, just know that being you is amazing, and that you have a beautiful soul. I hope you have a good day!!!! I love all of you, and if anyone needs to talk, I'm right here and I am here to listen. 


If anyone needs to rant, vent or just talk, I am here and won't judge anything or anyone. What happened between us stays between us. 

Have a good day!!!!!!",0.4213141426783515,2.733502879432624,1.3695285773884045,100.01647058823532,87.58156028368793,3.885022945348352,16.095536086775134,5.0885558068054335,-0.9848901960784312,530,11,120,2,17,164,81,141,0.091,0.631,0.27899999999999997,0.9888,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,2,12,0,3,11,12,1,0,4,0,15,4,0,1,2,32,30,15,0,7,13,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,6,7,0,1,2,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,1,19,11,12,26,2,15,4,0,0,3,21,6,1,8,5,85,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435216792694705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134911877210029,0.0,0.1229824360516256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491578800810298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683759875609104,0.1568357746013133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927623557200063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808007263361233,0.0,0.16986874706469926,0.25069869490772817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321557988439225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14843494020517325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283567217142267,0.0,0.0,0.16426471133816256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555908362431604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40464620700573134,0.0,0.0,0.15151615712393576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22162663410453765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255254442205277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478072513995361,0.0,0.0,0.15929099145725142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402402393776874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928617931653147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714395213388518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146494127973353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3595335243328215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879945136497712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IrisTheTranny,2020/01/04,"It just mentally occurred to me that literally fucking nobody wants to talk to me unless they need to vent or are trying to fuck me. I'm laying in my room right now, on my bed, watching videos I've already seen because I don't have the energy to look for something.

The only social interaction I've had in weeks is either.

A. People who come to me to vent.

Or B. People hitting me up for some sexual purpose. Not a romantic one mind you, just sexual.

Nobody talks to me at work, and nobody actually likes me. At all.

I've always let it be known that anyone at all can vent to me any time I'm available. I'm always willing to help people, it used to be pretty much all I did all day. I volunteered to do so on some site called 7 cups. 

And I came out of absolutely everything with zero friends. The last person I called a friend from that time fucking shot herself, and she mostly just vented to me too.

These last few years I had one friend, my best friend, I spent every weekend at his house, and he outright abandoned me and never talked to me again.

And he was always using me too...

Texted one of the people who randomly vents to me on occasion, and he said he was just in a horrible mood and didn't wanna talk.

I just... I told him it's okay, I get it...

I am so fucking lonely.

Speaking of Lonely, ya wanna know what feels reallllly fucking bad? 

I guarantee you I could find a hookup by the end of the goddamn night if I wanted.

Like, 30 minutes on Tinder, easy.

But I haven't been in an actual relationship in over a year. 

I am a fucking obbbbbbject. 

You use me and then just leave. 

Its not like I'm boring, with the exception of when I was on a stupidly strong sedative that's the last thing I've ever been called.

Overly violent, socially awkward, slutty, Insane, annoying, and fucked up, but never boring.

I try to be so nice, I let that friend who abandon me treat me like absolute shit, and he still abandon me.

Nobody wants to deal with me, nobody fucking cares.

There's one person that genuinely wanted to help and they haven't responded to my messages in weeks.

I want to fucking die.",2.882928571428572,4.595010007142862,4.5704761904761915,83.66785714285714,75.11904761904762,7.276190476190476,24.380952380952376,8.052868069273773,1.4202809523809528,1633,52,323,26,35,551,211,420,0.127,0.7559999999999999,0.11800000000000001,-0.4406,0,4,1,0,0,0,63.0,0,4,2,3,17,38,13,1,17,1,26,10,1,3,7,65,60,23,1,10,16,0,1,4,5,1,0,2,2,2,18,18,0,3,4,2,1,2,8,22,0,5,14,6,52,15,57,38,11,46,0,5,3,9,44,23,10,7,25,225,70,1,0.0,0.0,0.13522897532507278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646034632572889,0.0,0.17295795096423036,0.0,0.0,0.047117794091816184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0484473468264212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05785206782816998,0.04223694350045621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727128301960035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21225048408762887,0.079246303891053,0.07064310126147946,0.0,0.0,0.059684942399415776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0553203346432482,0.0,0.0,0.04468462783851699,0.07143224596643924,0.0,0.0,0.07190936095577527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06136805273960224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06267440162332208,0.05837760565110894,0.0,0.062271029106245275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035033780977336795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332740970543743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676562880114303,0.5764955936037207,0.0361997961085846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288374005790943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994833335390858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03807853180529172,0.16943538610609302,0.0,0.07336533068596296,0.0,0.14170208000416004,0.0,0.13540125532252645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058183948389472676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982538206872206,0.0,0.06996050178185965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05093419631226962,0.05137571403437981,0.1068773971541753,0.0,0.0,0.0650215120964789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780368634709566,0.05269617439283392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19214057967297665,0.12099813465151718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049017431330509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438871560980935,0.0,0.059171043596492286,0.0659081646475404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112249947047962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412595158684691,0.0,0.05334080988928518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05533299084875554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22276228464485476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046031456252918296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080405647534948,0.0,0.0,0.06620706045087436,0.0,0.09408316520737164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17952614900053687,0.0,0.0,0.2043374583036789,0.0,0.11115631312567913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050442037555720264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923760156969035
mentalhealth,jpehi,2020/01/04,"Help picking a new therapist, and how do you figure out what type of therapy is right for you? Hi guys! First time poster, long time lurker. I've been seeing a therapist for 7 years now and I love her so much, it's entirely talk therapy- we focus on a few topics per session and revisit some topics many times. She is casual, talks about her own life/relates to me so I dont feel too overwhelmed. I would pretty much say our sessions revolve around validating my feelings and learning how to cope with them. I've been seeing her since I was 16, so I've really grown up with her and gotten through so many obstacles with her. 

​

So, now I'm going to be moving to Port Orange, Florida and I need a new therapist! I'm not going to lie, I think I'm beginning to outgrow the talk therapy of my current therapist and I would really like to try out a new method to really get into the sources of my anxiety/depression. I worry though that these different methods mean that a therapist will be more ""up tight"" than I've grown used to. I'm really interested in CBT, EMDR, Neuro feedback and Biofeedback methods. The idea of starting new after 7 years is also really exhausting so I need some encouragement! How did you figure out what method was right for you? If you use any of the methods that I mentioned, can you tell me about your relationship with your therapist? 

​

Tldr: Moving to a new state, need to find a new therapist after spending 7 years with my current one and want to try out a new method of therapy",4.493030303030307,5.942696670033669,5.765909090909092,77.76886363636366,70.51515151515152,9.44040404040404,29.324915824915827,9.800150414767053,2.933984511784512,1209,47,223,30,22,405,152,297,0.034,0.875,0.091,0.9446,3,0,6,0,0,0,40.0,2,8,1,1,17,7,0,1,13,0,16,2,0,6,0,47,39,21,0,7,2,0,3,1,0,3,1,1,0,1,7,21,0,1,9,1,1,6,2,2,0,2,6,6,33,5,42,28,7,42,0,1,2,1,29,12,0,3,24,145,40,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05348437913770882,0.0,0.14493017039160713,0.16253446084877154,0.04548109078781711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05953789957468252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05760414929559344,0.0,0.0,0.0698759758341652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838354675218144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763366596347113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061127642447729676,0.05688859087821579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03494234492613834,0.0,0.07601955469429822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622229345241573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0448286459044941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550003899322554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04723973461700002,0.032674475242347116,0.0,0.0,0.059187212536406575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060362338564052875,0.0,0.0,0.13561283040683045,0.0,0.07285256306726683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216695362429296,0.09832984974503256,0.14877331755387094,0.0,0.4521557958404586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04532001483555523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804159828333987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21422707453443432,0.0,0.0,0.07180471822696137,0.0,0.11423130720329598,0.0,0.05318612506154045,0.0,0.0,0.10659033332964082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05532431049538503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047338421832136685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16126824091591835,0.05845657859894205,0.0,0.3059351075986442,0.5435745927189998,0.0,0.042854377928883435,0.06570983454805931,0.0,0.11699581971360533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081505322730886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155267026517946,0.0,0.0,0.03944790146309325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792047986355143,0.0,0.09502009644249557,0.0,0.16253446084877154,0.1292067106569959
mentalhealth,troubledredpanda,2020/01/04,"On the verge of ED relapse, insight please Hey y’all,

As the title states, I’ve been feeling on the verge of a full blown relapse of my old, negative habits.  For the past three years, I’ve been in a steady recovery from aggressive starving behaviors that would sometimes last for days at a time. I’ve never had a formal diagnosis of an eating disorder, nor did I ever reach being underweight, but I was very close to that point.

In the recent month, it’s been more difficult to stay on track. More times than not, I find myself going a full 24 hour period of not eating before realizing I need to eat something - and still not hitting my optimal caloric intake for the day. I try my best each time, but there is only so much someone can eat at once.  The holidays made it a bit easier to break even in my caloric intake (eating at least as much as I burned off, either naturally or through exercise). Now that the holidays are over, it’s already hard for me to find the motivation to do it.

I think a part of the reason I’m feeling this way is because my SO has been counting calories a lot lately and keeping track of what he’s eating because he wants to lose weight. He’s in no way shape or form unhealthy or fat, but he wants to slim his appearance. I’m all for him sticking to a healthy lifestyle despite my opinion of him being slim already, but as someone who struggles with body image, it’s not my place to tell him: “No, you shouldn’t make an effort to lose weight.” 

Lately, I’ve noticed him fact checking with me on caloric intakes of certain foods, as if I’m a calorie dictionary. He knows about my struggle with food, how even though I’m still in a frame of mind of sticking to recovery, I still have my good and bad days with it. The thing is, he goes to me instead of researching online and doing the calorie counting in a less discrete way. I’m totally open to him coming to me for health advice, or even a quick check in on how many calories something has. I do know a lot about it because I now use this knowledge to help maintain my recovery, but it’s getting to a point that he’s always checking with me, as if he needs assurance that I’m okay with it.

I’ve also noticed he has fallen into my ritual behavior with eating. I follow a relatively strict intermittent fasting (16:8) pattern of eating, but I will eat outside my 8 hour window if I need to. As of about a month ago I’ve noticed he’s done the same. There are other details about this that have also been triggering, but for the sake of anonymity, I won’t go into it because I believe the issues I’ve stated are the core issues at play. 

I do see a therapist on a bi weekly basis regarding my own issues. I was going weekly, but the copay is too high even with my insurance.

I’m just wondering what I should do about all of this. Him being this into this change in lifestyle is triggering me, and I’m starting to have competing thoughts about it. For example, if he says he has only eaten X, in the back of mind I go: “well, I’m still winning because I’m y below that”. It’s getting harder for me to fight it. A part of me just wants to fully give in and stop eating, but I know this will negatively impact my progress. I worked so hard to get to this point, and I’m worried that I’m going to give in.

Any insight would be extremely helpful.",5.480017247326664,5.360971910313904,6.410014947683113,79.65882373232152,67.56502242152466,9.133586294124413,32.25100609405543,8.768130331264683,2.53306328619064,2604,101,515,38,39,868,286,669,0.087,0.8220000000000001,0.091,0.7781,0,0,2,0,1,0,71.0,0,2,0,9,34,16,2,2,40,1,42,20,2,9,8,96,89,40,0,14,24,0,6,0,0,7,3,1,1,0,34,22,16,2,16,4,3,9,12,8,1,1,13,8,54,8,102,64,22,89,1,2,1,1,30,39,0,13,34,356,88,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054781000116507744,0.04969364146486696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372679456504775,0.08966202385586329,0.046646254988563486,0.0,0.0,0.038122594979632336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04310653556749199,0.04680760194863635,0.17086770733661916,0.0,0.04770277157078407,0.06316021168470068,0.058831314767906026,0.0,0.06120279605723643,0.06226981408178703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05930384852519133,0.048290564728937814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846182435348332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642494020992944,0.0,0.0,0.057368651899316725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5736318369565945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14810791018899125,0.050709310033079734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669105137653856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247530631867792,0.0,0.13557549597602506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786681498949055,0.10755536105210076,0.15930041715924695,0.047020311116875414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043716174253854,0.0,0.0,0.059588959379342686,0.0,0.0,0.07515142146767348,0.05923026996938891,0.0,0.0,0.11041524615560272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17553563885191234,0.0,0.0498285372823217,0.0,0.0,0.0924270208365497,0.045696229518960116,0.1264758209412712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543318163685555,0.0,0.09532009600617936,0.0,0.05304515020559476,0.03742036026011122,0.0568358510986506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320885985470708,0.0,0.08949281524197704,0.0,0.08242082525518724,0.12470292226152345,0.04323678349888644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914734048157128,0.058825343107976436,0.05970187088531954,0.0,0.08527202735507541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141462823728512,0.05351543448110608,0.0,0.0,0.05857057250363959,0.06153683985157085,0.15898392928089322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057638824159985225,0.055352301892573126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04458101310095019,0.0,0.0,0.04467241259919805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499859468657608,0.08631516523597099,0.0554445881634477,0.0,0.039679423936880204,0.05975230129691926,0.17907775521309427,0.04686851357347682,0.0,0.11721177615870625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04899874719846115,0.0,0.0,0.06508976330443278,0.03724364853823799,0.03592086435456685,0.05507848130426398,0.04450522930780014,0.09806678274406287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038060932931338484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04841767884452891,0.0,0.04625521650053712,0.0991965898942413,0.13349300975284453,0.08993560047530899,0.1365314984294738,0.05040450409146752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060794475474987085,0.04081221128342522,0.05693146096122291,0.0,0.07964656495382884,0.0,0.0,0.03610068135793724
mentalhealth,NickTheAllMightyOne,2020/01/04,My Anxiety has gone mad After learning of the potential war forming between Iran and the United states I have a ever lasting fear of getting drafted. I act very poorly under pressure and suffer from chronic panic attacks when put into situations I'm uncomfortable with. The thought of being shipped off and forced into something I fear makes my chest hurt with anxiety,8.650846153846151,9.787591892307695,8.356730769230769,64.09201923076925,60.84615384615386,9.576923076923078,42.403846153846146,9.516144504307137,4.710307692307691,303,17,40,5,4,97,51,65,0.43799999999999994,0.53,0.032,-0.9864,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,9,3,4,4,0,3,2,1,1,1,11,8,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,9,0,0,2,0,5,0,12,5,1,12,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,4,30,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3646805047698219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27116222586274863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156049511049844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5364293115726152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453019203772475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551630193996659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19429042368532465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910322855801218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27965720813989503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396117283772836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26792002191775144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18349664951248734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18922654996813806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19666711468649606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway197284,2020/01/04,"No sense of self I have no real sense of self and that is terrifying. I dont have a personality in a way, I'm just whoever benefits me the most. Maybe that makes me a sociopath? I think I feel too much remorse to be a sociopath though. I care dearly how my actions affect others yet I struggle to control it. I'm an inherently manipulative person and I lie often for the simple goal of getting people to like me more and to fit in better with others. What's strange about my lies is the people would like me exactly the same whether I tell them or not, they aren't massive lies. Just little things here and there to emphasize a point or to get my way. I dont want to be like this, but I know I could never tell the truth about my lies at risk of losing a lot of my friends. Some of my lies are in shame too, of my family or income. I guess my lack of sense of self links into my manipulative nature. I don't even know if I actually like the things I.. like. It's so strange and I don't know what to do.",1.7345539906103298,3.230711211267612,3.9273474178403767,87.98191314553993,77.73239436619718,6.7990610328638486,22.161971830985927,7.594959193182576,0.7251295774647888,780,22,177,11,18,269,111,213,0.182,0.7020000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.9139,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,4,14,15,0,3,13,0,15,0,0,6,3,42,28,14,0,5,9,0,1,5,1,1,0,0,0,5,11,7,0,1,6,0,0,1,9,4,0,0,0,1,31,11,26,24,7,13,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,9,7,130,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.1298032450244226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764077024631613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561744086703534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14918739470210418,0.1062014843382344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.311784680706857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785501267726425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539450367896848,0.0,0.06725627322697095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027668948952939,0.0,0.13898947301260914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653078469411024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193043457828874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32492153177592026,0.1333157613527292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488095233913393,0.0,0.11308441571196233,0.0,0.0,0.08878840355912955,0.0,0.13363123248566605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778117371888057,0.0,0.10258920425172924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844314111119481,0.2322867637192978,0.0,0.0,0.12574196840336266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15139994886252084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4162902985516968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13905593654258736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325215743465857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767382287846328,0.08523050495336289,0.13068635340424234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845556798489597,0.21116189403967972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448988868711068,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sp1tzzzz,2020/01/04,"Mood swings I've recently quitted Speed , about 4 months now. I had intense mood swing while I was on speed, being the happiest person in the world to suicidal thoughts. Since then my mood swings have decreased significantly, but it still happens sometimes. I don't think I'm a bipolar or depressing person. I feel relieved to finally have beat my speed addiction, but the mood swings are still there. I'm a pot smoker also, I guess it doesn't help either. Any tips/suggestions to get rid of those mood swings?",4.0759883040935705,6.648603242105267,4.1771929824561465,83.91479532163747,74.47368421052632,7.590643274853799,27.39766081871345,8.515128840125781,2.156625730994152,408,16,74,8,9,126,66,95,0.099,0.8220000000000001,0.078,-0.43799999999999994,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,6,7,0,0,5,0,8,2,0,0,0,8,16,6,1,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,7,1,7,12,1,14,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,2,11,41,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471904439973636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18133150754262287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541974477445728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19529902750831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465136931115336,0.0,0.0,0.24839301343103906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184672643617494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24979015793400305,0.0,0.2005138498275603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519854221739512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18098930187152948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3959778657880487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411760234369518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22388779366100164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18756954437209306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242610711736769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621649157991397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480271696470764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529193532634566,0.0,0.1800137890460028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,berserkerryan,2020/01/04,"Crippling Nostalgia A problem I have is that I become obsessive about my past, like I'll dream of someone I used to know or I'll just get hit out of nowhere with this wave of sadness. I start spiraling thinking about thing's that I've done and people that I knew. Conversations I've had and then I feel hollow that I don't have those thing's anymore. Does anyone else relate to this?",2.7398901098901116,4.761800461538464,3.5813553113553134,89.23269230769232,76.43589743589743,6.508424908424907,25.24542124542125,7.447530270364453,1.1683421245421246,308,11,63,4,7,98,54,78,0.107,0.8290000000000001,0.064,-0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,6,0,0,1,0,12,14,4,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,1,8,1,9,10,0,4,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,38,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672493350312196,0.18842498005330935,0.27611161210501217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976168002499432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358216342850092,0.27576911098269064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22511392807444944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362559544384926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407909061384153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14809782301553154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165312707808782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572468290976665,0.18682181411308832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578536372510383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283274674756133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907376084517872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580578419436069,0.17267034348608604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232742095356091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bornin1980s,2020/01/04,"I want a change! Not because of “Happy New Year” Situation has changed. That’s why the thought of change came up. I scrolled through social media and people are talking about new year’s resolution. However, this is not the reason I want to change. I am someone who suffer mental illness for many years. One of the side effects of medication is weight gain. I gained a total of 60lbs which made me at a current weight of over 200lbs. 
This is the first change I want to make in my life right now. I tried losing weight many times over last few years but I was not successful. I am hoping people can give me some diet plans and exercise plans that I can follow.",3.0009114583333307,5.266346851562503,3.504375,88.93645833333336,76.578125,6.1416666666666675,23.166666666666664,7.1686216300943375,0.8054197916666666,519,16,103,6,12,162,83,128,0.12300000000000001,0.818,0.06,-0.8704,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,8,2,5,0,0,7,0,10,8,0,4,1,18,20,3,0,4,4,0,3,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,3,4,0,3,1,0,2,3,2,0,2,4,3,13,3,16,16,3,20,0,2,0,0,4,7,0,2,11,64,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805177850838824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768092274347728,0.0,0.0,0.5904761682938579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495683955460607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709065103343056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883774057068285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087893726643967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099758340428953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885123943800046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489122765510942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563192041968976,0.07451735930149718,0.22636113111071104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246071400853387,0.11250201934600056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156359333040023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564689704768365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478757559998985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147795729327558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533584628099767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548263613664232,0.0,0.11379802241110773,0.09458813817117226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972814080705467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862587479308802,0.06509537975659131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579296925203642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975359905476888,0.0,0.0,0.4078247772223874,0.0,0.0,0.10073339944290212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875576210468342
mentalhealth,Shiraxilon,2020/01/04,"[Serious] My mom isnt acting like herself anymore. Please help. I want to cry. I really wanna fucking cry because I can't help her. She just woke up yelling and raving and hitting her pillow about ""Christmas breakfast! I need to call Christmas breakfast! You got Christmas breakfast? I need to make the fucking breakfast."" And I went over to check on her and asked what was going on. 

""I need Christmas breakfast!"" I attempted to assure her that she didn't and reminded her that Christmas had ended and passed yet she denied me and insisted on making it, but when I told her the time she began to get up from her bed and asked me if I had it then when I asked what it was she said ""Well I fucking got it and you don't. Fuck. You."" 

I know it's not her saying this stuff but this was the final straw. I always interviewed and helped her with the lighter things and she saw reason, but she always says ""I don't wanna talk about this. Nope!"" Then she staggered toward the bathroom. 

I left for my room but then I heard her continue. I think it's best to leave her on her own now but the comments worry me. ""Cause *im* the crazy one! Cause im alwaaays wrong!"" And eventually, she knocked on my door and told me ""your dad's gonna be home soon. He texted me. fuck my life and all the shit that I think. That's basically what he texted."" 

I'm only seventeen; a junior in high school; I don't know what to do! I'm trying to be strong but I can't anymore. I'm trying to research her delirium or whatever it is and mood swings but all I've come up with is schizoaffective disorder and I don't know if that's right. Please help me. 

Note Things:

•She's mentally sound in the middle in the mornings so I can talk to her about it then without being ignored or her walking away I think.

•She always defaults to saying ""Fuck you"" when she doesn't know what to say but is upset. (She dropped her phone and said it; she says it again and again when she can't finish a sentence about why she's upset.)

•I think she wants to argue and wants to pick fights because she's always clinging and saying things from petty disputes again and again. This was shown today when I helped remove Christmas ornaments and she reminded me about a bunch of mistakes I made. 

•She works at Waffle House to support us and comes home exhausted and tired. She's a 43-year-old heart surgery patient. She talks in her sleep about her work. 

•She repeats things she's said a lot as if she never told it to me and it's getting more frequent. 

•I'm in the USA. Arkansas. 


I don't want to abandon her.

Update: 
Thank you, everyone, for the links and advice that you've given me. It's really weird to rely on strangers and I think now that I'm alone, I'm sort of in denial.",1.0411097099621711,3.476554610200367,2.212196721311475,94.24576040353092,85.77595628415301,4.908516183270282,20.468011769651113,6.376216756565619,0.18009309794031125,2127,66,446,21,65,675,232,549,0.102,0.8,0.098,0.439,0,1,0,0,2,0,76.0,1,6,0,5,22,26,9,2,17,0,25,17,3,7,4,82,81,51,0,13,16,2,0,1,0,1,3,12,6,0,34,31,5,2,11,0,1,8,15,18,1,1,22,13,89,7,56,54,7,61,0,1,1,6,82,24,7,7,29,292,123,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06556482095501957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949057045396892,0.0,0.0,0.22331489750408898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13308115985707922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881753467434668,0.0,0.06303831060904345,0.0,0.0,0.08180143199060892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041245342550449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851187649220111,0.0,0.0,0.13785085856505472,0.0,0.11559344384132544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474022311030187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689710914638627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059426584602653036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411250322495325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349970039568106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721715413470605,0.07010912518843387,0.0,0.038131846103184236,0.0,0.10732459648426078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950833883435966,0.22486306760390964,0.07088994427632261,0.1346042574134086,0.0,0.0,0.07741905085463448,0.0,0.0,0.14494903069935355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749544695340774,0.0,0.0,0.0710443111077807,0.07289931796224508,0.0,0.047391445467275715,0.032779409625690266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05704208589445917,0.0,0.06348726325487271,0.08957336358622614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06761635394439891,0.0,0.0,0.0785812887322261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925110445693945,0.051748087160628335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040530622459076,0.0,0.045465560487768425,0.05102905381534191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14730114011884027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08596602671649299,0.06898521710209699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057299081058262875,0.19146919028303025,0.3201415968026161,0.0,0.06790409848313055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887243513931965,0.0,0.0,0.06714382744377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680814847689497,0.0,0.07613903299378702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16178615538241953,0.0,0.06177240396112881,0.0,0.0,0.17830073514013225,0.2149600258253609,0.0,0.0,0.039123850961553526,0.0771162599499124,0.06359856737026777,0.1923375096748597,0.0,0.09110670662152563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070747124291723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829835507279766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060326797229971724,0.062198082014618725,0.06054313718410535,0.0,0.0,0.06467754427375591,0.0,0.0976924597902645,0.06813860712092862,0.0,0.0,0.07335825643966752,0.0,0.04320721973957014
mentalhealth,wee_elizabeth,2020/01/04,"I’m so sensitive that it’s ridiculous. Since I was a child, I’ve always gotten upset very easily. Someone could slightly raise their voice and I’d have a lump in my throat.

I have this fear of people being mad at me and people seeing me as a bad person, which has resulted in my saying sorry way too often.

I will do absolutely everything to get people to like me and that’s my toxic trait.",2.4766607142857167,4.3212334875000025,4.649642857142863,82.08250000000002,76.625,7.071428571428572,20.17857142857143,7.957251820313856,0.9684821428571428,309,7,59,5,7,107,60,80,0.203,0.735,0.063,-0.8923,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,3,6,2,2,3,0,8,2,1,1,0,6,12,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,2,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,3,10,1,7,7,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,1,1,39,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21531483704699955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21605959982430364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066043585627328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325630549508487,0.0,0.0,0.2911847673563015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519505446499758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642046403416712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5381892771420355,0.2259453251519237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20578186981087052,0.0,0.0,0.2062037615163513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21405470029193666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192524023595147,0.0,0.0,0.2896684220376119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21350983923208075,0.0,0.2053971653165177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway_809132,2020/01/04,"It’s like I’m just waiting for permission to die For me death is peace, it’s nothingness, with no perception, no thought, it’s just an end and I really don’t see anything better than that. 

I grew up in a fairly abusive home and actually became suicidal when I was 8. Back then I wanted to die to escape the pain and I nearly did, I got so close to that point but I was scared of hurting people. So I chose not to and I have changed a lot since then, I became a lot less emotional what I was going through at home stopped hurting, and eventually it just stopped, I guess I was finally not so weak. So it stopped being that I wanted to escape the pain and suffering, it became more that I just didn’t want to live.

I have seen quite a lot of professionals, I have called helplines and honestly just tried to see something different make something different, but honestly I’m just not interested in life, in living. To me life is just travelling from A (current position in life) to B (death), and to me that’s as simple as a straight line. 

I’m not interested in a career, I’m not interested in a partner and kids, and it’s not that I don’t see the point, it’s that I’d just rather not.

I basically am right now just passing the days and I’m so tired of this, but it’s like I don’t have the right to my own peace. 

Like I was in a car crash a few months back going 100kmph off of a highway, while it was happening I just hoped that it would just kill me already, but no, not even a scratch. 

Not that I would hope that this happens but if WW3 does start I really frickin wish I will be a casualty.


I’m just so tired, and all I want to do is die. But it’s like I need permission. It’s like I need to be allowed to die. It’s like I need permission to have peace.


I have to be so careful to with how I worded this so you might actually understand, if anyone actually reads it. If I didn’t then I would just get the same kind of responses of people saying they know me better, or to “just keep living” like yeah cheers. 

If I mention or ask anyone around me too, I’m probably just going to spend a very long time confined in a mental hospital, saying I want to die over and over again, telling them “please just let me die”, the whole time everyone there will be saying they “care” about me but really they don’t, they just care about the person they want me to be, while denying me of something I really want which is death, which is peace.",2.6998639248540246,3.9549465405940616,4.250891089108915,87.64888296521963,74.68316831683168,7.951764407209952,25.225945671490226,8.5409612609427,1.4909167301345527,1893,62,422,35,39,633,194,505,0.198,0.631,0.172,-0.9718,4,0,3,0,0,2,52.0,0,1,6,3,38,29,1,1,24,1,39,8,0,3,1,94,82,43,11,21,40,0,1,7,1,6,8,3,2,3,31,17,0,6,4,2,1,7,19,8,0,0,12,8,54,21,55,57,10,50,0,3,4,0,17,21,0,13,29,292,85,3,0.0,0.07798030238302775,0.1926785536085997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262875875548419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203909828002926,0.0,0.05416033828938136,0.058589521126131375,0.06152836907549027,0.0,0.0,0.1012157207667773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641647044184444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720472308117978,0.0,0.2013090839558261,0.0,0.06962380174721912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04244538785551081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4098349965773517,0.137525844599522,0.0,0.0,0.057595363864107435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403329141987501,0.058292771507086324,0.0,0.0,0.043470348184118934,0.0,0.0,0.06288928644020858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209738317711534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03438574875619415,0.0,0.11221296025501676,0.0,0.052638463254944916,0.0,0.07250291174328799,0.0,0.11640040646593887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203611268837012,0.13073877593547656,0.0,0.0,0.1409131606300077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584996132186025,0.07281481654914096,0.0685364490825128,0.036170337085158384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730054648149902,0.1394617604470801,0.22507802757918727,0.0,0.17434819969395593,0.05824442017724828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16786130154877787,0.0,0.0,0.04393218667676839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632628640830815,0.06981957357346044,0.0,0.0,0.05253310013734743,0.0,0.0,0.1464035092620859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006412064625492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125600705990836,0.057467332766393014,0.0,0.0722453743648051,0.12443335858205845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095996504478277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07000261373975525,0.06583305490390333,0.0,0.1686517233411016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124117181570694,0.0,0.15701677184637927,0.06589254117064992,0.0,0.15733868588926478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05444305025393226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520033716601443,0.0,0.0,0.04658436871009622,0.0,0.0,0.16507347389978197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199119508788132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05752542449852351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052249952390940664,0.07675479652173457,0.15128988316587952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044684230697103235,0.0,0.0,0.06851599048225926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05430446933035204,0.2717367543807986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07348036993461253,0.07568428293733348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025978379388404,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CptnAhab1,2020/01/04,"Guys I really need help Sorry if the title came off like an emergency but it is.  For the second time, my sister tried to commit suicide today, pills and alcohol.  Currently at the hospital.  We can’t take care of her.  We don’t have the resources or time at home.  We live in Utah.  She suffers from PTSD and Anxiety.  We don’t know if there is a place she can go to help her, because we just can’t take care of her at home.  Please someone help.  She is mentally unwell, keeps surrounding herself with bad influences, and we can’t help.  What do we do?  Where do we go?  Who do we talk to?",0.26843137254901706,2.6056165714285733,2.3779495798319346,92.1440112044818,89.16806722689077,6.198543417366947,19.69803921568628,7.554174236665415,0.7753188795518215,448,14,97,9,15,150,75,119,0.13699999999999998,0.6559999999999999,0.207,0.882,1,0,1,0,0,2,18.0,9,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,6,0,14,2,0,1,1,24,24,7,1,3,5,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,3,14,1,1,1,0,0,3,5,2,0,1,1,0,18,3,13,23,0,15,0,1,0,0,24,8,0,3,5,65,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17270478994892868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236260885794657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349320123187489,0.09851187683795776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18483113316886826,0.3295306863692481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18368576859887226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16001268252758394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43327716460992616,0.0,0.3242025892577717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364044570754486,0.0,0.0,0.08881295199148674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895121357380848,0.0,0.1426986820053265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16285812533861485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982680549226522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688410617414147,0.17739190403346305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889056195220712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352721743448176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692595876390926,0.0,0.0,0.1809016730685208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676779008435842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430111522368341,0.1298906178476136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18846437738613897,0.0,0.15318104056099274,0.0,0.0,0.10971803846712676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whooaamI,2020/01/04,"I am so scared. It's on the right and it's watching.It usually just watched from a distance,my corridor.I started to close a door and I thought it just leaved.But  this thing snuck into my room and it's too close to me
I know that this is not real but I can't stop scaring",-1.8563934426229525,-0.02350377049179997,0.5234262295081997,102.17464754098364,103.09836065573772,3.7514754098360656,19.214754098360654,5.6839178017228535,-0.3608177049180328,214,8,53,2,10,71,42,61,0.040999999999999995,0.8540000000000001,0.106,0.5179,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,14,6,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,8,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,6,0,5,5,0,9,0,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,3,34,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536839644238586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3632043791749332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725086955662853,0.0,0.0,0.6389472818793427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258598259877029,0.0,0.0,0.2667809476480032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21199511342137134,0.0,0.0,0.25332886291375145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35144232866042546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jasonappalachian,2020/01/04,"Transitioning from Rexulti to Abilify.  

Hello all,

I'm on a combination of drugs which included Rexulti for Major Depressive Disorder. The combination has been working fine. Unfortunately, my insurance as of January 1st is a high deductible plan.

This means that even with my assistance card the price for a month's supply is \~$950, which is not within my budget. I'm also ineligible for their other Otsuka assistance plans since I have insurance, however bad it may be.

That said, I know that Abilify is a pretty close drug to Rexulti and, more importantly, there is a generic available and it's affordable.

My psych had agreed to switch me and says the transition should be easy, but I'm having a lot of anxiety about the switch. I've been doing so well on my combination of Cymbalta and Rexulti.

Has anyone else made this switch? If so, how did it go?",5.751730769230767,7.74182789102564,7.180000000000002,66.74000000000002,68.16666666666667,12.123076923076924,32.230769230769226,11.698219412168324,4.752253846153846,685,30,114,27,12,234,101,156,0.063,0.8540000000000001,0.083,0.4799,2,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,3,8,4,0,0,10,0,18,2,0,2,1,17,26,11,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,11,6,0,0,2,0,2,1,1,2,1,0,6,2,9,2,17,16,4,7,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,3,1,82,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712468962374091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638157635153884,0.0,0.0,0.14973098116064928,0.21941073088417165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787971363864303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844376234015547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454218680653605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4966665551192326,0.0,0.1788856727700269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414368025466733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12170013941108085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262496307660222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768520469843223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18205333638632384,0.0,0.20262351757212194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23326016884458103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17092372206958933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21785636682916024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20369524454106888,0.17029194292847222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771380094815336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19253669526633493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15589575631500546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,babyboi1998,2020/01/04,"Why is the rate of BPD so high in people who identify are alternative but also socialist? I tend to notice this in many women who say they are feminists with socialist views. I notice that many of these women also identify with being goth or punk, and when asking the majority of them they say they have BPD.

Why is BPD such a component of such views and styles? almost same as how malignant narcissism is aligned with far right views",5.39211382113821,6.987787073170736,6.144878048780488,75.34869918699188,68.51219512195122,10.34471544715447,27.081300813008127,10.504223727775694,3.0372617886178865,348,11,62,10,6,114,54,82,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,1,0,10,9,10,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,5,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,11,8,2,6,0,0,3,0,11,5,0,2,1,44,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16661488653965553,0.0,0.0,0.266122986045545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15555156958147534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6286846372500877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17579947039648253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33738534461652736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.378870726955548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535341619806973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14209558502378722,0.0,0.2646389589963421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002809936376898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bacongod239,2020/01/04,"Is self esteem permanent? I have very low self esteem, and was looking around on ways of boosting it, however, i came across an article that said that self esteem is permanent. I couldn't find much else on the subject besides that self esteem as it is is somewhat controversial. So, is it permanent?",5.8264545454545456,7.491112690909091,6.2925,74.43875,67.54545454545455,9.863636363636363,33.75,10.125756701596842,3.750727272727273,238,11,40,6,4,77,36,55,0.078,0.878,0.044000000000000004,-0.2168,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,0,0,6,11,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,2,3,0,6,7,2,7,0,1,1,0,5,5,0,1,0,29,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17982089924127398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310317104840872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687432714058563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18462236175567054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696273070049817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849165094606376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19214619819142426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8429111842802551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16666936885832967,0.0,0.1603364792541621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CatOnABlueMoon,2020/01/04,"I feel like I'm losing control and alone Sorry, on mobile..
Anyway..
I feel as if everything I touch crumble. I have a medical issue that makes my hormones go crazy and that means that I gain weight no matter what I do and my periods are basically not there or there for too long (haven't had one in 5 months and now it's not stopping for 2 weeks already). 
The bigger problem is that I'm trying to do everything in my power to lose weight and be a bit happier, but I have an older brother. 
How is he a problem? Well.. No matter what I do or don't do, he will be there to shame me.
-Not eating enough? A lecture about how stupid I am.
-Dare to eat a piece of cake after my mom's birthday? A lecture of the same sort.
-Buy a treadmill? ""They are shit, you are wasting your money"" so basically the same lecture of how stupid I am and how fat and how Im always going to stay fat.
I'm on edge non stop. Getting shit everywhere for trying to fight that issue. I don't eat too much, there is nothing I can do in this situation. Before this problem started I was practically underweight. 
So hearing at college and at home (and everywhere else) the my diet (from a professional, of course) and efforts are stupid.... It's making me crazy. I have no support.
""Diets are stupid""
""You're wasting momey""
""Nothing's gonna change""
""You'll always stay fat""
All of these are mainly from, but not limited to, my brother.
Oh yeah. My favorite is ""go die"". Why? No reason whatsoever. I dared to breathe the same air as him.
My only answer to it by now is ""I wish"". And I do.",0.6350424710424711,2.9553013365079366,2.901698841698842,89.42235521235523,86.42857142857143,5.3101673101673095,21.846846846846848,6.766488616294105,0.6455070785070789,1191,42,246,15,37,405,162,315,0.214,0.72,0.065,-0.9946,1,1,0,0,1,0,66.0,0,3,1,7,18,16,7,1,14,1,32,14,6,9,1,47,49,25,1,5,9,3,5,1,0,3,4,1,1,0,13,11,10,4,5,0,2,3,11,13,1,1,2,6,32,3,31,42,9,25,0,2,0,0,12,9,2,4,12,171,45,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084716716639324,0.11557533078782077,0.0,0.17429228225845386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911996181862927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143411728125845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079349359020807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746682378865198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10869618800572843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3215036300249185,0.08749087718370112,0.0,0.0,0.1082170556860902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882543078419337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059121759128434,0.07482118609987062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05471860396600746,0.0,0.17856631756321814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11804156073195105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050556120012451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312947615274273,0.21862781996608693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05116719196614885,0.0,0.0,0.09268529772336208,0.0,0.234338592710034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398200132951164,0.0,0.0,0.11408480326128223,0.0,0.10550735208041362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226618762028577,0.08359678080310277,0.0,0.07699071309622722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20098803449529667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709697059187719,0.07965407010790716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30064564775361546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10768283768976272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21501358018283684,0.0,0.11772413849197605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172398778169661,0.07413046726211099,0.22326261702655825,0.0,0.17512274455442114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884962425487867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422134931757192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401039411936305,0.255072850620846,0.0941674316229818,0.0,0.09450512861293696,0.0,0.12043763635518324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YourOnlyKemosabe,2020/01/04,"Is it normal to get angry when your parents fight? My parents fight often & every time they do I get really angry with a mix of sadness as well, I was just wondering if it was normal to have this feeling.",7.2371428571428575,5.469703190476191,8.333333333333332,72.72000000000003,64.71428571428572,10.304761904761904,32.904761904761905,8.841846274778883,2.7659619047619053,162,5,30,2,2,56,33,42,0.292,0.635,0.07400000000000001,-0.8995,2,0,0,0,2,0,5.0,0,1,1,0,4,4,2,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,9,3,0,3,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,1,5,1,5,7,0,2,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,3,2,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28223437303632337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21946905735579256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13170856873879594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721843432875371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5104381507588773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5784734506921607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16687276059984024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15189035168002218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342064551875071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28248385442186796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,medamemaxime,2020/01/04,"I [F19] feel as if I can only blame myself for setbacks in life. Hi there,
I just wanted to get this off my chest and I feel comfertable sharing it here :).
Lately it feels as if everything I do comes back to me in a very negative way, even when I feel confident while doing it. 
Especially when it comes to love and sex, my experiences so far have been poorly. My first time was with someone who I really was into, not knowing that at the time this guy was having sex with literally a number of girls and actively ridiculing me for the way I shared my feelings and how I was as a person in general. I feel that I took our 'bond' way too serious and that this was entirely my fault and my embarrasment.
Months later I was sexually assaulted while walking home from a night out, which left me feeling totally worthless and I started to actively loathing myself and felt like a joke, not to be taken serious. (I did report the assault to the police)

The last few months these sort of events got me thinking since these past people didn't take me seriously that I must be the joke, or at least not one to be taken into account. I don't feel like a victim, I just feel so so dumb when I think about life and these events, and that maybe ... these people were right in the way they treated me.

Have one of you ever felt this?

Thank you so much for reading :)
X M",4.954069538596109,5.3897500706319725,5.890470150885633,81.0142663459436,68.73977695167287,9.154690575114804,28.46293461622568,9.168548406835145,2.1753409577957585,1055,34,214,19,17,349,146,269,0.115,0.752,0.133,0.0396,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,1,2,1,1,17,19,5,0,13,0,21,6,1,1,3,46,47,26,0,4,8,0,11,2,0,1,2,0,1,3,19,17,0,0,14,3,2,4,6,10,0,3,16,11,36,9,30,27,4,41,0,1,0,3,12,13,1,4,22,161,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933611900115848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20015951551026195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673654189247132,0.10509248530281327,0.0,0.0,0.10441610995299776,0.11364744041379787,0.0,0.0,0.528702040289353,0.08299982384655481,0.2231042125252861,0.0,0.0,0.0988236114466806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06069984622063975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929206645322908,0.0,0.0,0.11503758655684325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653914813053773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385011169554128,0.09470312899115656,0.13105737728201294,0.0,0.12623113975547934,0.0,0.16412433869661475,0.1135204650256287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485800755791257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671956280341635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18546934210679625,0.0,0.08540649992206617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902812196651497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745468353942738,0.08836098613556803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090803657179522,0.16109073658744258,0.10144488306371466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621257216863795,0.0,0.07442860808583279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921805184339436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610623289396757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843989604053163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223360314290247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735375227180474,0.0,0.0,0.10696397683017547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888835627162247,0.0,0.0,0.13549230463467873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908151240396692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586160129353108,0.06852664174651706,0.3688766988764619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheNinjaQueen456,2020/01/04,"Can anyone help me figure out what the fudge is up with my brain? Ok so, I have voices in my head (like someone else's thoughts) and they all have names and stuff in my little mind palace and are fighting constantly. One is basically super sadistic and tries to starve me and make me super depressed for fun. Another is constantly super hot headed and likes to light things on fire. My favorite is always really positive and tries to help the others not get to me. Then my least favorite is chained deep in a pit and screams while constantly trying to crawl out and give me panic attacks. Sometimes they take over (i let them because they constantly pester me) and my head gets slightly fuzzy and i don't feel fully in control but still aware and i can take back over if needed. The closest i can get to my mental state is somewhere between bipolar 2 and alternate personalities, but that's just not quite right because i know its ME but at the same time its reeeally not. Does anyone who knows more on the subject have a possible solution?",5.953111888111883,6.934153277777778,5.785353535353536,80.71213286713288,66.72727272727272,8.516550116550116,31.392385392385393,8.617729084823388,2.430170473970473,831,32,152,12,13,259,123,198,0.064,0.809,0.127,0.9043,0,0,0,0,2,0,15.0,0,0,4,5,4,12,2,1,7,1,15,5,4,2,1,36,27,20,0,2,8,0,3,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,8,16,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,6,24,7,21,25,4,26,0,1,0,0,11,16,0,1,11,106,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925974521046692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250871117189866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16682221113182194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357108391951017,0.0,0.09172748677003603,0.0,0.14543748559525468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331683112170139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5156451684312695,0.1337951038205407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027452432130052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043924389776104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965240072554278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06031716068876637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869740168948268,0.11443488589457795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3672812293071416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15991660957379258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311185294660525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198322434955583,0.0,0.11655920438665646,0.11956101362799156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796277305865859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021736372440435,0.0,0.12044999740601615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845283359270932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083473158855123,0.0,0.0,0.1399623944038371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041603807413446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344827830323288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12688076075607024,0.0,0.0,0.0764209285095191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187394124089592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107495560205043,0.0,0.11798194079572713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526602060375557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655976082410193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17938411127353915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925170124632823,0.0,0.0,0.09470380253910476,0.06955959537853898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24297246410222526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Losingtheplottoday,2020/01/04,"Would this be selfish? T.W If I was to tell someone that they're actions are seriously affecting my own mental health, when they are having repeated suicide attempts and serious self harm? 

I've been there for them and supported but when they're refusing to help themselves...how much do you put your own mental health at risk? 

Walking away is not an option. The only thing that hasnt been done properly is by explaining that what they're doing is having a serious impact on others. 
I have tried, slightly, and they deflected instantly by claiming it was all about me when I only said it hurts me when they self harm. 
So I cant see it going down well, but part of me wonders if some hard truth might work. Then I wonder if what they said was right and i am thinking from a selfish point of view. So i thought I'd ask a group of strangers to see what's what.",5.137272727272726,5.804128941176473,5.499625668449202,83.1592245989305,68.41176470588235,8.77005347593583,30.16042780748663,8.841846274778883,2.27164705882353,680,25,135,11,11,217,110,170,0.182,0.758,0.061,-0.9617,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,2,5,2,9,12,0,1,5,0,22,2,0,1,2,23,34,16,1,4,6,0,1,0,0,2,2,2,0,2,13,4,0,1,5,0,0,4,3,9,1,0,9,6,18,3,15,22,6,16,0,1,3,0,17,6,0,8,6,98,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957677497894533,0.0,0.1402737007881209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278730010065347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485149933585606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13374484378111975,0.0,0.0,0.31740108641059833,0.0,0.0,0.10007366745277202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983037425139032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30092164938885924,0.15838532787749102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975380234582256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22710108050920075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616790061029855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411382030082194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500892735619269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275026896207461,0.2840398867336029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237947976256879,0.0,0.3115081114835927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265027006473122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16331163962623688,0.16942560530699174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049611669289554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991893014331544,0.095666390969899,0.0,0.1185287365342508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136593748267107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13424000456840765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238222778935233,0.1086932909644724,0.0,0.0,0.10605952221906552,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sad-rad-writer,2020/01/04,"I'm getting depressed again and I don't know how to explain it to anyone. Hi. I have episodes of depression, sometimes major, sometimes minor, but it's been quite a while since I've had one. One of them has been creeping around the corner ever since the beginning of December, but it's finally fully kicked in and now I'm struggling to get out of bed, to do any of my work, and to talk to anyone around me.

I just got into a relationship with someone who isn't actually aware of my mental health problems, because it's a long story and I don't want to get into it with her this early on. But she's getting worried and I'm getting really distant because talking is exhausting at the moment. I don't know how to tell her that I just can't reply, because I need time alone. I don't know how to tell her that I'm too tired to get into it. Truth be told, I want to break up with her and quit while I'm ahead. I'm not in the right headspace for a relationship and can't give her what she wants, and I'm only going to make it worse by staying with her. I just don't know what to do. 

It's also tricky because I'm at home at the moment and will only see her when I go back to uni, so I'm supposed to be keeping in touch via messages and phone calls but just can't. I just don't know what to do. I don't want to explain it, but I know I have to at some point. I just want the world to go away.",4.269883517763538,3.497068343234325,5.6535857115123305,86.27481071636576,70.18811881188118,8.317530576587071,28.71461852067561,7.285733465282438,1.383608969132207,1080,33,251,9,17,367,134,303,0.127,0.863,0.011000000000000001,-0.981,0,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,4,19,6,0,1,10,0,24,3,0,4,2,55,63,23,0,7,12,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,2,0,16,20,0,1,8,0,0,3,12,5,0,2,5,2,29,1,48,55,2,40,0,2,1,0,25,20,0,1,15,165,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.09829319572811088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432085610852093,0.0,0.08054984894141165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849654145216343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085870377024626,0.0,0.0,0.17933343882264072,0.0,0.0,0.09463457397757874,0.0774514064935867,0.0,0.2456044139633589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285161803358686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17350881131897322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111164543093624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110339454963552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31574833446740663,0.0966247215154643,0.17173323536540405,0.0,0.08055908674800763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706610157044964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103551659947914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952912232975531,0.0,0.0,0.33213537889606465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913856916606636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723480547641139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015072388143503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468640656506477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13650790783706535,0.15321199827969492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521780375509252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638034483365368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21426714551050074,0.0,0.0,0.06452709658825602,0.0,0.0,0.21628218555441706,0.0,0.08601870946201329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026488655884849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664173446669356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534407458782446,0.0,0.19923945541822355,0.0,0.0,0.10735958517076953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529977417101254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16191808591910645,0.17607640405258893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058733632490109065,0.1157687180477395,0.0,0.09624717684707727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297051452698603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332909324307879,0.10229125739593704,0.10264751122038122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,babyfawn666,2020/01/04,"Dad Keeps Guilt Tripping Me I've been dealing with many mental illnesses since i was 12. I'm almost 17 now. Last November I was brought to the emergency room after my second suicide attempt and waited there 30 hours for pretty much nothing. (they suggested i stayed inpatient for a while but I started having really bad panic attacks because I was reminded of my last stay at the hospital). Things have been hell since then. 

I just recently moved in with my dad last summer, the attempt was sorta hard for him as everyone in my family thought that me moving to a different province would help my mental problems, however things just kinda repeat themselves. Same shit just with different scenery. 

My doctor has referred me to a therapist but the wait times are very long and I haven't even gotten a call back yet. I don't like talking about my problems, especially not to family because i care about them and don't want to stress them out. But sometimes my dad drags me into talking about mental health related things with him and they always seem to end the same. We always start talking calmly and he comes across as quite understanding, but then very quickly it's changes to him saying things like ""I'm grateful for my life because there are people struggling to survive in other countries"" ""your life is perfect because you have a family and food and shelter"" etc. He talks about how he's struggled with depression and suicidal thoughts for his whole life and how he feels guilty about it, so he's happy with what he has. I then explain to him how guilt doesn't have a good effect on me, and the fact that I, having so much in life, have the audacity to hate myself and have mental issues that stop me from being able to function like a normal person makes me want to die. Because in my head that guilt makes me a horrible, selfish, useless person. 

My dad won't shut up about it. I tell him I don't like talking about my mental health with him but he doesn't care. He keeps telling me to get a job, and do better in school, and figure out what I'm gonna do after I graduate, and I keep telling him that I'm working through things and I will get a job soon, and the only class I'm doing poorly in is gym class and that's because I have 2-3 panic attacks every day in class (I don't know what to do about that). 

He makes me hate myself even more than I already do because now I'm feeling guilty for being unhappy.",6.477948477018247,6.415045710359411,6.5597697909325845,79.23467621955996,65.46934460887948,9.20613890846449,32.529089343042834,8.735056554316923,2.5688954506303348,1923,71,361,26,27,614,220,473,0.245,0.682,0.073,-0.9984,5,0,0,0,0,2,41.0,1,2,4,8,26,31,6,8,18,0,37,11,2,7,2,74,73,33,3,6,9,4,3,4,0,4,8,1,1,2,19,29,1,6,11,1,1,5,9,20,0,1,10,4,58,11,58,57,7,50,1,2,0,0,44,17,2,4,30,243,77,9,0.06519615924278037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528453591595375,0.0,0.07194558292960841,0.0,0.10849685449083496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834008632360854,0.0,0.05013182213895677,0.05443606972233075,0.2782008148186873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05766070474055556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06657256795447149,0.0,0.13294365888850934,0.0,0.06896889177664668,0.05616071832519436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04204612916790978,0.0672143774255609,0.05615335642293876,0.0,0.06766332014792319,0.13623222022711806,0.0,0.06673103158279525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057744445843818215,0.0,0.07271095138208325,0.08612289660046887,0.0,0.0549305760493336,0.062297724076501186,0.0,0.0,0.1843834098735321,0.0,0.06593027407710199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883545454527904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812460466422722,0.0,0.0,0.054683445162019936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940252383159473,0.05840295285079351,0.1287354192994147,0.06691006847548958,0.1386009371304498,0.0,0.0,0.04369961126438052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420508408794705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804785175551989,0.12939425623211362,0.1738480257526573,0.0,0.0,0.03583010409296928,0.1594307141949756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18419990141066891,0.12740620088326607,0.0,0.0,0.057696549326374864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305568276530877,0.06609867253035569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285119710820867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13858639900162575,0.09585335721934206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387839360262709,0.06255747314358613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04958461695558633,0.0,0.15298729114832205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045198807856934566,0.11385354303540908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632793239224317,0.0,0.12476783892341925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06934414050856419,0.0,0.0,0.041766329053993315,0.0,0.06437334192898966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051846602612082016,0.0,0.06598199381051721,0.0,0.05935213477813076,0.0,0.0,0.06692292056873106,0.10786187328829586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448066855258502,0.0,0.09229235414966,0.13898086225558373,0.0,0.05450690841772801,0.07468198013777616,0.13631436248870776,0.0,0.14262803289353154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620110160636369,0.17095295044569125,0.0,0.0,0.07569776587440265,0.21656715620319966,0.0,0.0,0.10351693591422308,0.03801640474808952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787150103778174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758731853888953,0.07690876779126378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278918350549095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04746358041125311,0.0,0.0,0.04631348095687994,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bluesteam1,2020/01/04,"Am I sick? I have completely ruined my relationship with my girlfriend. I was always bringing up little things that bugged me, because I was always scared I was going to lose her. I never felt like I was enough and felt like any other guy could come along a take her. I was always so anxious when I wasn’t with her that she was going to fall in love with someone else. Even though she always tried to make sure I felt loved. But my brain would just make me worried all the time. She was the only person that I ever like I belonged with. So I always wanted to be with her. She truly made me so happy. But now she is gone. I am left feeling desperate. The thought of suicide is always in my head. But I know I wouldn’t, because of the way it would effect my family. I really wish I got help when I needed it. This girl was so important to me. And I don’t know if she will take me back, if she knows I will get help.

Not only do I feel that with my girlfriend but I felt it with my friends. I always felt like they would say things behind my back. Or plan things with out me. Even though they never did. I would be so anxious if a couple of them were hanging out and I wasn’t there. I’d feel like they don’t like me. 

I had an episode on New Year’s Eve. I got really drunk and don’t remember anything. But ever single insecurity came out of me. Little comments that someone made to me, came out and I got mad at them. I know I can’t drink again until I fix what’s going on in my head. But is there anything even?",0.7850019592476478,2.7414942978056445,2.6131730015673997,94.08286295062695,82.51097178683386,5.1160266457680255,18.119220219435736,6.158741222570753,-0.30114036050156745,1167,26,263,9,32,387,139,319,0.14,0.782,0.078,-0.9543,0,0,1,0,0,1,33.0,0,0,5,3,21,16,1,2,7,0,34,8,3,5,6,67,70,25,1,12,12,0,8,6,3,7,1,1,0,3,14,21,2,0,15,2,0,10,10,5,0,0,27,9,66,11,32,33,3,40,0,2,0,2,29,14,0,4,21,195,80,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4341193811830542,0.0,0.0,0.05068469160893682,0.0,0.0,0.16840113921661176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266788043564565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462186468341345,0.0,0.09086870457700556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320297811441532,0.0,0.17049076898800505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420319451535983,0.07814596337660372,0.0,0.0,0.05950817849478277,0.08246885183767239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301352672444031,0.0,0.0,0.062262383902312014,0.0,0.0,0.07701205065938503,0.0,0.14768414420864662,0.13483792182047305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026265737894495,0.0,0.1130576941656804,0.05324607048109842,0.3578146938815593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057583665265044263,0.0,0.03894018252413648,0.0,0.12707570176487426,0.0,0.17883147301555002,0.0,0.0,0.07379894508095859,0.0,0.07934128818679691,0.0,0.0,0.15298380325170227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991519787929712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384456689219426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809798364964678,0.0,0.0,0.21847704254082914,0.14940239625049986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338286168856565,0.0,0.0,0.13453707736195192,0.14104900681376598,0.09950211525172226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055264943366135764,0.11496819872698825,0.07198400375815668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337072965966558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507895008962175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095494923441643,0.0,0.0,0.08002006848030603,0.08443085286099819,0.0,0.0,0.059271277357767736,0.07462008747743429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630237992833326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152651543898191,0.0,0.0702460487839454,0.0,0.11207840775305432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14854834841862816,0.0,0.14645570904534136,0.05917052141009897,0.043460530805235084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050602710780941806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043961230604701855,0.0591604710617295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570875721463705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569142507763353,0.0,0.21178314773969265,0.0,0.0,0.0479965202389061
mentalhealth,dirtyjersey1999,2020/01/04,"How do I identify problems with myself? Please Help. I feel like something is wrong with me but I am not sure what, and I don't know how to find out.

Ever since I was young, I've always been unhappy . I have had short instances of peace and happiness, but in general I think I have usually been sad, ruminative, scatterbrained, displeased, apathetic, and/or directionless. The thing is, I can't pinpoint it to one thing, I don't know if I am depressed, suffering from anxiety, some sort of disorder, or what. I just don't know. It doesn't help that I am also terrible at reading myself and understanding my feelings. 

I am seeing a therapist soon, but in my past experience with a school counselor, I didn't get a diagnosis. Am I being dramatic in thinking that I should get some sort of diagnostic test done on myself. Would it be wrong to ask this psychologist that I plan on seeing if I could undergo some sort of test to determine what exactly my issue is? Thanks",4.6725698757763965,6.330198135869567,6.081366459627329,74.87108695652175,70.3586956521739,10.257142857142858,31.077639751552795,10.451354775682146,3.5615618012422363,763,33,141,23,14,258,108,184,0.23399999999999999,0.672,0.09300000000000001,-0.9822,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,1,6,11,0,0,4,0,27,0,0,2,3,40,41,12,0,6,8,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,12,7,0,0,9,1,0,0,7,7,0,1,6,4,26,4,19,30,3,13,0,3,2,0,3,8,0,9,6,108,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231757147773976,0.12816319669833834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783059550953286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399489538769267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12297840412841415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326636370847587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765288287563787,0.0,0.0,0.157623582418209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393266678707654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15066842447651144,0.0,0.0,0.15576183705183386,0.11003725772666076,0.0,0.0,0.1407783201852241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16094599513602356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639651094943248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064827372333021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16076466456783353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539484135354579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525004324327844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437300219413026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14703665187013668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16907591213967035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14738349011693747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406915535676013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588402614935165,0.2454799084875759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741311761869425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857787407477365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14516907077795554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14180780320317687,0.0,0.17883776820839276,0.20465801829279812,0.1973891711125536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16034803181232307,0.0,0.0,0.16963950104096615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941669779307296,0.3368097249079265,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1710dj,2020/01/05,"Weight People who don’t know me close think I’m doing great and taking care of myself bc i lost weight.

It’s like no Karen, i lost a ton of weight bc i’m depressed, lonely, not eating bc I can barely get myself out of bed if I’m not working... let alone cook. 

Physically i’m in the best shape i’ve ever been, mentally i’m in the worst shape i’ve ever been. 
Life is about balance, i guess... it’s not worth the trade off though.",-0.06709677419355131,1.881755462365593,2.1208709677419364,96.42130645161294,85.7741935483871,4.580215053763442,14.676344086021507,5.6839178017228535,-0.9491797849462368,330,5,78,2,10,111,60,93,0.183,0.659,0.157,-0.1596,0,3,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,4,9,0,0,4,0,7,6,0,0,2,12,20,3,0,1,4,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,3,5,0,2,1,2,0,5,5,0,0,4,3,7,4,8,15,3,9,0,4,0,0,1,7,0,2,3,41,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747101801690221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17702793837707162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17198893982220173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452909649002327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17261021937805798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051764063779523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813266183559025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18597941976429147,0.18582915405079825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927066648863167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249519114618425,0.11914951801327787,0.08241257085854639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36828636019922417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699981062585102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694721071368795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12683259000453775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080886358990638,0.16573537465039015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6162506256877185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228070739642146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,not_enuf_karma,2020/01/05,"What should i prepare before my first session to get the most bang out of my buck? I've been to counseling and therapy before but i find myself usually stuck while giving responses, like idk what to say or idk where to start. Sometimes I just spend my time crying so its a waste of time and money

Pretty much should I come up with a list to talk about before the session? 

I wanted to go for counseling now specifically to deal with some introspection (why i did what I did, how can i prevent myself from doing the same things again, how to cope better in similar situations). 

Maybe do a mindmap of factors that I presume are inter-related?",4.856016260162601,6.318535739837401,5.665203252032522,78.7877235772358,69.65040650406505,8.71869918699187,28.300813008130078,9.150863307647796,2.4088471544715446,508,18,93,10,9,166,85,123,0.10800000000000001,0.767,0.125,0.4977,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,8,2,0,0,6,0,9,0,0,2,0,20,16,8,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,1,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,14,2,19,10,4,14,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,3,9,71,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5034152695366647,0.0,0.0,0.17440988405094712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16987278277966944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21661805681448074,0.0,0.2033074660827624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802398206385167,0.16774063264480432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303034322911747,0.18917493083119627,0.11207491696442087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634334519238492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981167559053789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496677584622936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20062618120818226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156823611343215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216642515718307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950386485282412,0.0,0.13958118322051624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585041706907499,0.0,0.0,0.225518630821386,0.0,0.13101280247127098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299811205562551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171910646511636,0.0,0.11631534277399375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17794488770129413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,butt3ry_toast,2020/01/05,"My life I never feel good enough for my wife, shes so accomplished and Im such a loser. I try and try to be better with life but I just suck. :/",-1.8904545454545456,-0.1439922424242397,1.215378787878791,101.0430681818182,92.63636363636364,4.512121212121213,11.280303030303033,5.985473137389443,-1.389842424242424,108,1,29,1,4,38,26,33,0.292,0.5920000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.7602,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,3,4,1,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,7,4,4,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,6,2,3,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,19,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049713618553889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3562983550695913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435483630718376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28922443485634397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37247221343768094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4871228598367182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659517552188949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4682296461122651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xXCheshieXx,2020/01/05,"I Changed My Oil!! I suffer from depression and it can make it so hard to want to do the littlest things, but today I changed my own oil! I've never done it before and it was a success! I'm usually never proud of myself, but I am today and it feels so good!

 I hope anyone right now who is depressed and is having a hard time gets a chance to feel good about themselves like I did today.",3.944268292682924,3.835038060975613,5.196243902439028,87.01826829268295,70.82926829268294,7.5356097560975615,26.15609756097561,6.742157984588678,0.9724458536585364,299,8,66,2,5,100,53,82,0.158,0.569,0.272,0.9396,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,4,9,0,0,4,0,9,0,0,1,2,13,16,8,0,2,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,6,9,6,6,13,1,9,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,9,47,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316181056307945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988292983624338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3726674268530079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034197927243231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18025329229908785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781242597865459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202634866097867,0.0,0.0,0.2954772546727785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315575291973772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494765437644327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860535449845398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757541640931145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717014367977498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15042336349937188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702018513576863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10270917344557208,0.0,0.5008829238212105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939943128908117,0.0,0.1038924646202257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Killerqueen1970,2020/01/05,"PLEASE READ THIS! I might need help I’ve been in hospital for 1 month in august/September because I was drastically underweight and nobody knew why. Turns out I burn more calories than normal people do. The time there was quite tough. It was kinda fun, I was 17 (turned 18 there) so I was at the children’s hospital and there were always such lovely nurses who would play games with you and distract you. But there were awful times. One time they wanted to examine my stomach so they wanted to do a gastroscopy. Would they wouldn’t do it without anaesthesia. But since I was so underweight, the weight alone was life threatening. Anaesthesia could worsen it. I panicked. My parents wanted the doctor to do the gastroscopy, but since I freaked out and cried they said they don’t want to force me. I felt so helpless. It was extremely scary. So they set one the next day so I’d have one night to think about it, and the next day I could decide weither I do it or not. I ended up doing it, I didn’t sleep much but I have to say I am proud that I did it. I knew if I said I’ll do it some day later I’d never have done it. So I just had to. Earlier today this situation of me lying there in my hospital, freaking out over the anaesthesia and the fear cake over me again, for no reason. I started crying again. It was horrible. I felt the exact same emotions as I did back then. I thought stuff like that only happens after a trauma. So, can it be that something like that ends up as a traumatic event? And what can I do about it? I just remembered this life threatening situation and the panic and fear I had. It was awful",1.1864745574343092,3.6910452167182686,2.6913931888544904,90.51788203540528,85.9969040247678,5.789600698579028,20.35635468762404,7.2200825789825185,0.6721119155354454,1267,39,257,20,39,412,162,323,0.226,0.711,0.062,-0.9962,1,1,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,2,6,2,21,15,0,4,14,2,41,7,2,1,2,50,59,26,0,12,10,1,3,2,0,4,3,3,0,1,24,13,1,0,10,3,0,0,7,9,0,3,26,6,40,6,29,26,4,34,0,1,0,1,17,11,0,5,24,193,64,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718022900137747,0.0,0.0,0.08610859609276801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957430368310935,0.0,0.06308407137916447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652502122610383,0.0,0.2273489018974253,0.20021961949632736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592224949529856,0.0,0.1059020510005792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640775898202085,0.1833156615314072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23290091722919465,0.0,0.0,0.19872547138787014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151227914782847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936444735535408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619036639664812,0.10111601062589287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934001054703407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978223359909854,0.0,0.0,0.08260149376156199,0.0,0.07607407661420594,0.07673351674382765,0.07981474027376627,0.0,0.22011695246316124,0.09711454878905187,0.10139425367853616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103742631375972,0.0787057242144079,0.0,0.12141845883587685,0.11490889487507422,0.0,0.0,0.07174412397285079,0.0,0.0,0.11359649105600035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11007004054585756,0.10351394948579017,0.0,0.0,0.10640078673134852,0.0,0.0,0.11722940198786012,0.0,0.1968776629421708,0.08229617686258629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712092857323483,0.2326450755115512,0.103560681031094,0.0,0.0,0.07966853611085196,0.0,0.0,0.0732478843116608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846664790841732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06630961479691898,0.0,0.0821562806150454,0.18103045973350054,0.0,0.09809257530012852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22512598223532604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441547656956208,0.0,0.0,0.12601800139246291,0.0,0.0,0.09337996890027836,0.0,0.0,0.09975675780500028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470268919437827,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheLeadSA,2020/01/05,"Understanding the science behind work-life balance Ever wondered what balance of exercise, sleep, food and work delivers the best outcomes for your physical and mental health? [A team of scientists led by researchers in South Australia is embarking on a four-year study to find out.](http://theleadsouthaustralia.com.au/industries/health-and-medical/understanding-the-science-behind-work-life-balance/)",15.847011494252875,17.13691151724138,11.684482758620696,45.725459770114966,45.896551724137936,14.629885057471268,52.0919540229885,13.5591,7.96925747126437,340,19,35,10,3,97,44,58,0.0,0.9109999999999999,0.08900000000000001,0.6369,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,4,0,1,4,1,1,1,7,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,8,3,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,19,2,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427006269507563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20919439563473094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21137400369710585,0.0,0.27964918005275585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4916523745139606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16335084161183644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330629128239651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314341884666351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407572801304034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507993807571829,0.5050957625956818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14892847514093893
mentalhealth,etnom654321,2020/01/05,"It begins again, help? It starts again tomorrow ...

School starts back tomorrow, and I’m a first year teacher who struggles with their mental health. A couple of weeks ago I was nearly involuntarily  Hospitalized by my therapist. I would post on one of the teaching subreddits, but the advice goes 1 of 2 ways: quit—your mental health isn’t worth it or quit—you aren’t cut out for this. I feel inadequate and like I am failing my students all the time. Those thought have been  a fixation for me, they are intrusive and defeating. I get stellar reviews from my principal  and neutral to positive ones from my students. On paper, my job is really the easiest in the school and I think I am capable of one day being amazing at it, but for now all I want to do is escape.  I see my therapist again on Tuesday, but I don’t know how to self evaluate my abilities in the classroom and these feelings are killing me. Sorry for any mistakes, on mobile at my second job.",4.973281772575252,6.235352875,6.026739130434784,77.06341137123745,69.16304347826087,9.57458193979933,32.0886287625418,9.851270322608157,3.2225556856187287,755,33,140,18,13,251,114,184,0.131,0.7170000000000001,0.153,0.5373,3,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,3,6,8,2,1,9,0,15,2,0,1,2,23,27,11,1,3,4,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,8,8,0,0,5,0,1,0,3,6,0,5,3,3,22,2,25,22,2,29,0,2,1,0,5,10,0,1,18,102,30,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729463366655173,0.12454446406537813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554458116893197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803555971570464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546019238131845,0.0,0.09061065217104984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420816909943212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950893205502924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340526916127815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2986891196275384,0.0,0.0,0.0941739550024723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27884844993836083,0.0,0.1554420479721545,0.0,0.07721493425126974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864103296266894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831812063067465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28561860067741346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455982874273342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988773482871491,0.0,0.0,0.09000767464847552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28438629709962204,0.11196003194106964,0.0,0.14657177867297394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572778573250157,0.19889275339725448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688074181641395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262618495214999,0.0,0.09002650375234786,0.0,0.11154102957348183,0.0819264768384916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287033485780301,0.11152208388603498,0.1127003458733683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980692151365064,0.0,0.0,0.09047716930340108
mentalhealth,dabc7696799656,2020/01/05,Pls any help is appreciated anexity Guys I'm loosing my mind if anyone can help I have bone crusing anexity. 1 week I can be fine happy right as rain  the next week I'll have the same thought running threw my head stressing me out 24/7 it affects my eating sleeping kills my stomach I'm absolutely miserable I went to the hospital about a month ago for panic attacks they gave me some medication but it made it a horrible nightmare now I'm horrified to take medication bc I'm worried it will make it worse like it did in the hospital  and I will have to go back  pls if anyone has any good advice,2.331500000000002,4.661874483333335,4.338333333333335,81.77000000000002,79.16666666666666,7.666666666666666,28.33333333333333,8.59863814320734,2.414333333333333,478,22,93,11,12,163,81,120,0.19699999999999998,0.6609999999999999,0.142,-0.8884,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,3,9,2,3,6,0,11,7,4,3,0,12,23,5,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,6,2,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,6,0,11,4,8,14,2,14,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,3,8,50,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16461668511276176,0.1493291928174089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22911648929725875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355816148567165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19164701411300053,0.0,0.12953496607809398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17237613638689922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573942262486418,0.1412958458693472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16680140170576754,0.0,0.1793282826493091,0.0,0.0,0.17288805952896585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258297193773304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863754902938271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230080817633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15940046310914646,0.1124480321396792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394104703071198,0.0,0.0,0.17009608436357554,0.0,0.13446277500603485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791586017772545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976509402984347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14386350250677438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685811711002696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19296980143624665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12666058772013275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337380351445186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27025611785809234,0.0,0.0,0.15616365502839594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107881130558247,0.17167463427580046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaygirl000001,2020/01/05,"(25f) In the process of being diagnosed with physical illness, family doesn’t take my illness seriously. Have no support. Starting grad school in August. If I move out for grad school to get away from toxic environment, family will lose home. Hi everyone. I wasn’t sure if I should post this in the medical sub or this one, but my question is mostly about being emotionally supported. 

I’ve had a tough year with all kinds of physical symptoms that my doctors are trying to piece together to come up with a diagnosis. This year, I suddenly became anemic. I’ve been struggling with feeling like fainting, dizzy spells, constant nausea, dull feeling in stomach almost every day for 3 months now. I almost fainted a few weeks ago when I was out with my bf. My gastro is trying to find source of bleeding/cause of anemia. They did an endoscopy and found mild gastritis/hiatal hernia but neither could be a cause of bleeding. Next I’m doing a CT to look for cancer and ulcers. 

This has all been so debilitating that I can barely go out bc im scared I’ll faint in public and generally just feel really sick. My bf has been supportive but I can tell it’s frustrating for him. I’ll preface all this by saying he got me pregnant by accident in Sept., I had a miscarriage wherein I bled for 3 weeks. That could be the possible cause of anemia, but we are trying to rule out more serious problems especially since I have all these gastrointestinal symptoms. 

Anyway, I live with my mom and she is the most insensitive person alive. She has told me multiple times that it’s all in my head even though my blood tests show a legitimate problem. I’m starting graduate school in July and was thinking about staying at home to save money but I really want to move out, even if I blow my budget on housing. My mom is totally unwilling and unable to change. I’m living in a toxic environment. However, she is struggling to pay the mortgage and expects me to contribute rent money when I start grad school. If I move out, she will probably lose her house. She has made it very clear that if that happens because I move out, it will be all my fault. I can’t be dealing with this as I need to do well my first year in order to land a good job when I graduate and be able to get my entire family out of poverty. It’s too much pressure. 

Should I move out anyway? How can I get through this rough patch with my health with no support? Should I feel guilty if I move out and contribute to my mom’s financial ruin?",4.327089138828272,5.939023768115945,5.454290190811932,79.2087376196072,71.15320910973084,8.617066756197191,28.582004364613066,9.142720283898788,2.4862713782105095,1972,75,366,41,37,653,246,483,0.168,0.755,0.077,-0.9935,4,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,1,0,1,3,16,25,1,4,15,0,44,18,3,4,9,80,73,28,0,16,13,3,5,1,2,6,15,1,3,1,19,30,0,0,8,1,5,8,6,15,1,2,13,7,52,10,67,45,14,57,0,4,1,0,23,25,0,12,22,250,71,13,0.06833953622157384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06057887548875977,0.0,0.1368643478007031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420724388013635,0.0,0.0,0.04165914697602896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21061058607357933,0.07229416782329688,0.0588684592588057,0.0,0.0738507605904951,0.0,0.109127117668507,0.0,0.0,0.04407334727414232,0.070455061065477,0.0,0.06936319072896112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994841111687765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687277999916546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027523829766636,0.0,0.0575790067267045,0.06530135548619939,0.0,0.0,0.19327329806019056,0.0,0.13821809154775766,0.04882177833157735,0.0,0.0,0.0624610980314313,0.058129574598802435,0.0,0.07493077410175356,0.0,0.0,0.10711376119629856,0.0,0.038838933319950655,0.05731996063532128,0.054657370051836164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06043242618595345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.070136080120012,0.07264173130274806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371002537908672,0.0,0.0,0.15770929871585346,0.0,0.0,0.07381842624259362,0.0,0.06781644473648464,0.0,0.0,0.07116511060360076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033387245434550836,0.0,0.12069012504398766,0.0,0.057387998674112026,0.1529089209111435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466452155371118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06884489305938102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24011531660502464,0.054547965814853626,0.4358046705997272,0.05023742237067495,0.05067290018117777,0.0,0.0,0.07267987206677863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04630863838483717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596714470498848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704255888582269,0.0654503849076412,0.0,0.07368157861169516,0.13078341341616234,0.0,0.0,0.07655592080576289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756011367475218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05434634215153225,0.0684197976862809,0.2766530365197753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0565311705637673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14511322643787758,0.07284085274757038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288664272580404,0.0,0.0,0.31020358337639226,0.06440920412364301,0.14206188975057954,0.05138282627840294,0.0,0.059731766844644575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04378921538125523,0.0671432473589189,0.0,0.03984933314279203,0.0,0.0,0.06530135548619939,0.0,0.13919417750842608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05638727447801791,0.04030842907981352,0.0,0.1096357075593348,0.0,0.061445450311554635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202526218095856
mentalhealth,mwolfff,2020/01/05,"My psychiatrist says I have no mental disorder besides ADHD, I think I have DID Hello,

I think I might have DID, I am 18M, I plan on making a phone call tomorrow with my family doctor to make an appointment but there are several things that are holding me back from being certain I want to make the phone call. 

It's a long story but just over a year ago, I finally realized that something wasn't right mentally. I first told my mother, at the time I suspected I had anxiety or depression. I always new I was a pretty sad person in general but it took me until then to bring it up to someone in my family because I don't trust my family for other reasons I would rather keep private. Upon hearing my concern, my mother immediately shut down my concern and said I didn't need to see a doctor.

Months later I'm moved out and on my own, now that my mother isn't too involved with my life it gave me a lot of time to think about myself, I spent a lot of time googling questions about some mental symptoms I've been experiencing, drawing conclusions to some crazy mental disorders I probably don't have. I visited a psychiatrist and after telling him all of my concerns he said I had ADHD, which I agree with. Most of my symptoms that have been affecting my life are non-ADHD related.

Every disorder that google matched to my symptoms didn't quite sound like me, until finally, just a week ago I found dissacoiative disorders, a little bit of reading and DID matched the symptoms I was feeling perfectly. Several months of googling and I feel like I finally found it.

Now that we have a potential answer, I'm afraid to bring it up with my doctor because my psychiatrist says I had no other disorders but I'm convinced I have DID, I'm eager to find out for sure so I can work out a plan to cope with the symptoms that affect my everyday life.

So my question to you:
How should I bring up this issue to my doctor? Or should I go a different way about it?

Sorry if this is the wrong community, still new to reddit. Thanks!",5.11118283726324,5.844856592964827,6.4196984924623095,76.30120989563203,68.49748743718592,9.841669887901043,31.388094317742556,9.943994293440598,3.1041195206803254,1596,64,300,37,26,541,190,398,0.10800000000000001,0.8079999999999999,0.084,-0.8153,1,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,1,1,0,7,15,13,0,1,19,0,35,12,0,7,4,63,65,18,0,7,10,3,2,2,0,4,12,6,0,1,20,14,0,2,15,1,1,7,8,4,0,1,22,10,59,9,48,38,8,52,0,2,1,0,25,17,0,11,29,216,79,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448933162530672,0.0,0.12042054948981558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056517971834848975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05196145578333255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0522291438765823,0.0,0.08281133199742566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741551042977613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13871541394565395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585025958888417,0.0,0.0,0.07096582497187147,0.3892323080538941,0.2780912004283353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057228659109016235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19209729931711506,0.0,0.06868854200134053,0.04852471530978957,0.0,0.22322132790573246,0.06208104463805874,0.057775876972954415,0.0,0.14894969439808495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03860261233187276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655496294319056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07089471094787042,0.0,0.06037371847717345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392958517690793,0.0663681920263763,0.0680774062682186,0.0,0.06011035002072775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549262642184625,0.0,0.0,0.136018820873148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738045141110923,0.07205632733619463,0.0,0.0,0.10843212198937484,0.07219215923101871,0.0,0.050364573746439226,0.0,0.13120229371530207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05930836768283064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910283680390443,0.0732332526157876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15218021093572978,0.07224523141370713,0.06794209576067196,0.0,0.0,0.06983689132742912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05800648117270067,0.12922201399136538,0.10803132827817738,0.0,0.0,0.05412640645417826,0.0,0.0,0.15346892765037248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05755154299270668,0.05229099398143535,0.0,0.07603503754176161,0.0,0.0,0.05424396625121935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401729720296577,0.35299373517796184,0.0,0.0,0.05936832045325995,0.06253503060058167,0.0,0.0,0.045125497848160084,0.13056832110354336,0.0,0.0,0.11882059270185982,0.0,0.0,0.06490402014425793,0.07546574620133438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040063166736753336,0.053914683091638486,0.0544843067879722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049449273224614905,0.0,0.0,0.048251058052855636,0.07426391911421566,0.0,0.04374064526095384
mentalhealth,kian65,2020/01/05,"Hellish Struggle Well From Last Month Until Now I Started Losing Weight And Worst Thing I Go To Gym , I Work , I Go To University Also I'm Metalhead

But The Why Post This I am Always Depressed And Full Of Sorrow

Not Because I Live In Iran

But Depression Has Came To Me From 2 Years Ago",-0.25844827586206875,1.9077076379310365,1.7271724137931024,93.01006896551723,101.93103448275862,4.388965517241379,19.593103448275865,6.2581,0.2911393103448269,225,8,46,3,10,74,46,58,0.349,0.62,0.031,-0.9702,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,3,8,1,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,7,6,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,7,1,0,1,1,7,1,8,6,2,13,1,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,7,30,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066959123202092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864702734097939,0.1940206019717588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214155217010746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666905250541302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40166723973859103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650378928740767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19006906259209927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058981394317549,0.0,0.0,0.2608636150360025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18611836994902234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233175659179063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16504273965859909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437655431724035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15491136664208507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839448045709931,0.20965267690433464,0.0,0.21040451941194485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16975445945124998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15015730481203493
mentalhealth,sadsmolbean11,2020/01/05,I want my therapist to be meaner? It’s kind of strange. She’s very understanding and genuinely helpful. She makes me understand that my thoughts are not facts. But i almost wish she would be more critical of me? Maybe that’s a reflection of how I talk to myself.,1.514621848739495,4.234056764705883,2.984761904761907,86.64000000000001,89.19607843137257,7.620168067226891,24.932773109243694,8.418075326091056,2.279642016806723,209,9,41,6,7,68,38,51,0.09300000000000001,0.7709999999999999,0.136,0.2917,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,1,14,10,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,11,1,5,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,29,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694937438903535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18039144616655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802563618519934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17964564798813346,0.0,0.2703761796477528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21631563637185888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124794263053495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21365830532590546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5603454068104974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22205954948884007,0.15873921350030262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30948498309063993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19118146741109185,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SiennaBearCat,2020/01/05,"Don't know how to help my best friend. :( I just found out today that my roommate tried to kill herself yesterday. She would've followed through if the method chose wasn't so painful. I won't mention her method but she told me that within the first instant it was so beyond painful that she decided it wasn't worth it. This isn't her first attempt since I've known her, I had to call the paramedics on her when she tried to OD several years ago. She has bi-polar disorder with mostly lows and mixed episodes. She also has borderline personality disorder. So things are rough for her. 

I would push for hospitalization but after the three times she's gone in the last few years (two voluntary, one involuntary) she's adamantly against it at this point. She smart enough to know how to avoid it if she doesn't want to go. I tend to struggle balancing supporting her and looking after my own well being and I don't know how I can maintain what balance I've been able to achieve with this recent revelation. I'm not sure what to do at this point because I can't spend every minute by her side but I'm afraid to leave her alone.

BTW, she's currently sleeping off a huge panic attack so she's safe at the moment.",3.238425981271167,5.291094046025107,3.6602869097429753,89.09086471408645,75.06694560669456,6.895477186690576,25.606893803546523,7.793537801064563,1.297434987049213,963,34,198,14,21,300,140,239,0.14800000000000002,0.736,0.11599999999999999,-0.7311,2,2,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,5,13,16,2,4,7,0,18,3,1,3,1,28,32,17,2,4,7,0,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,15,6,0,2,6,0,2,4,9,9,1,5,8,2,33,7,29,21,5,33,0,1,1,0,27,14,0,3,15,132,48,1,0.13561890924567507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202179802695471,0.0,0.0,0.1404602894554876,0.0,0.10845439272600399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15428608784837927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267202830695768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232367823154812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384820694428989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108620389336506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013058647037546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426478023507458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23071474984683865,0.0,0.14869913397811274,0.10477883286595856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707535146330717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090249614346084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15004222946726065,0.0,0.22359781734162154,0.11054751184991976,0.0,0.14360084306653792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388572727127125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189888274982773,0.0,0.2886161625629117,0.15911956927342716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841720048813735,0.0,0.0,0.2564074102851174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390731169298475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532107650598405,0.0,0.11218536317516108,0.0,0.13571685160000865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417783299656972,0.0,0.0,0.15389873105520654,0.1278192169801842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009917714123043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790804765995312,0.0,0.12855086846206673,0.12958967960491802,0.0,0.18415267423761364,0.0,0.13247996813477733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799915464378764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193768658809985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926795640630606,0.0,0.0,0.1746682622272316
mentalhealth,unreliablethinking,2020/01/05,"Believing things I know don't make sense - Please help :/ I need some advise on whether or not I should seek someone to talk to about this. At the moment I feel like my own mind might be making this all up to trick me, and I am not sure why.

I don't know how cohesive this might be, as all I did was write down the things I am experiencing that other people might not find normal.

I am a 23 year old female btw.

So I'm just going to copy/paste what I wrote:

When I am in public I am afraid of someone listening to my thoughts. At times when I believe I have spotted the person who can read my mind, I will spend a majority of that time ‘talking’ to them, trying to get them to leave me alone, and apologising for any thoughts they might have been disgusted by.  I have had this recurring since about 15/16. Sometimes I am suspicious of my friends being able to read my thoughts, but I usually try and talk to them in my head telling them to just tell me if they can.  This causes a lot of anxiety, fear, and guilt.

I believe if I look close enough at my surroundings I am able to make out the shapes of other dimensional beings.  I believe they do exist, and have since I was about 17/18.

I believe sometimes when I dream that they aren’t really dreams, and have a hard time sometimes distinguishing between being awake and dreaming, and vice versa.  Deja vu happens a lot to me, and this also doesn’t help this belief and reinforces this idea.  This used to happen to me when I was younger, and it has been happening a lot in the past year and a half.

I sometimes ‘see’ blocks of static in the air, for about 2 seconds at most, and I feel like that is something to do with the other dimensional beings. This began when I was around 18.

I have been hearing things I know aren’t there, mainly computer noises or phone sounds, and sometimes chickens (yeah idk either).  I frequently hear people say random words very loudly before I try to sleep.

I take 250mg effexor for major depressive disorder, and the last two times my depression worsened I felt belief in these things stronger, and they all negatively effected my depression. Each depressive episode lasted for about four months, and were about 8 months apart.

I have never really spoken to anyone about these things, as I feel people would think I am joking, lying, exaggerating, or crazy.

People know about my depression, and it gets really bad sometimes.  My last depressive episode, I could barely function I would end up on the floor sobbing because everything was so painful, like a terrible grief as if everyone I knew had died.

The reason I am getting concerned and think I might need help is because the other week I was just browsing the internet, and saw a sentence in an article that I felt was targeted directly at me - as in it was written as code for me to decipher, like a secret message. But I know that cannot be true because it was written by a stranger and on the internet for literally anyone to read.

I am worried if things like that begin happening more often, that my next depressive episode will be result in death because I won't be able to be able to tell what reality is.

But I am also incredibly worried that whoever I see will tell me I am making this up, and tell me I’m lying.

What should I do?",7.947825379057697,6.66142028706625,7.908526508598758,74.78891574234255,63.00630914826498,11.209036328482751,35.435840032563355,10.237710317436264,3.3998724534445914,2578,95,495,48,31,834,275,634,0.17800000000000002,0.7609999999999999,0.061,-0.9976,2,1,1,0,0,0,69.0,0,0,9,1,24,26,2,3,25,1,74,3,2,10,6,109,120,48,3,12,18,0,6,5,1,13,1,6,0,1,40,27,0,1,24,7,1,1,12,17,0,4,27,17,82,9,73,69,16,57,2,9,4,0,34,28,1,19,33,365,122,5,0.20899562321524415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541141089672187,0.0,0.08356686218859592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035531047637915494,0.0,0.03997026992837134,0.0,0.0,0.07306729957118982,0.0,0.0,0.046512603576696336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0436256539079288,0.127401792084771,0.0,0.04445997052529282,0.29433312336016243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05367401888401081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0417164997521834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150133420542556,0.0,0.0542261151859715,0.0,0.05988177268408064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04627702224531008,0.053987086708241865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049926068573209234,0.04695794750757057,0.0,0.0,0.05879454508976579,0.07925585003510953,0.07465325749213525,0.10033428658849852,0.0,0.047754553335944534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040367375015009685,0.0,0.08189369036529331,0.0,0.029694257244812568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18481413939059527,0.0,0.04680475686922372,0.0,0.05362245116439947,0.0,0.1177766283514062,0.0,0.10506402060188624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05898265489383015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357316101420542,0.12776949539600446,0.0,0.0553240470998012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763088090784186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04387592165201643,0.0,0.0,0.13326045382754134,0.0,0.0,0.1395062013737864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771391611586277,0.10551300074616507,0.0,0.08340915625792802,0.0,0.0,0.07748380322008874,0.04029757719876992,0.0,0.05556730407326579,0.0,0.05119283419463121,0.0,0.0,0.05482643742911313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05559651959701885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975498535332199,0.14489125013437318,0.04562172921364213,0.0,0.05735360852064503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567891352992695,0.0,0.1004159609028531,0.05372057720929102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04155042701271204,0.0,0.0,0.0832712264739975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644166961241431,0.0,0.05228663933871587,0.0,0.08854065666692224,0.040223760338355265,0.3100530230461869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04924397537969069,0.0,0.03928467470790855,0.1259870739951825,0.22833923318137825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082711081649476,0.06695797824146567,0.0,0.12443938484643915,0.12186702859508967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642073199760473,0.0,0.05103958890737511,0.0,0.0,0.045126278902613184,0.05754478807308652,0.04311081923622319,0.0,0.0,0.04191092063040297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047146510690513774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612260013202522,0.0,0.07423224717736976,0.0,0.0,0.06729316457997563
mentalhealth,bigbrycieboy,2020/01/05,Where is everybody? It seems like everyone I meet or see in person is genuinely free of worry. If depression and mental health issues are on the rise where is everybody? I’d feel a lot better about myself if I related to people,3.5522727272727286,5.830645136363637,5.595454545454548,74.53818181818184,74.9090909090909,9.854545454545457,24.63636363636364,10.125756701596842,3.0676090909090914,182,6,31,6,4,63,37,44,0.13,0.691,0.179,0.3527,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,7,7,4,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,4,5,7,1,5,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,5,1,22,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712990744323039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642068579001515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931166893856279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15510409051248747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260652651414219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201715844689362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986455911392504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607913672371929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091359847075056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126646698510634,0.26784584913874354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24444330309473486,0.2792574128835229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3115236799997701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,phenom787,2020/01/05,"Low self esteem and anger issues I have an extremely low self esteem and I always feel sad. I always feel so defeated ,I feel like a walking bag of shit. I’m always being bullied by everyone I know, I have no freind, I’m ugly,short,retarded,fat ect I have literally nothing good to say about myself. I never try new things because of my anxiety every time I want to do something I automatically tell myself that I’m a failure or I don’t deserve happiness I see a girl I like I tell myself she’d never want to be with a piece of fucking trash like me. I’ve lost in life and now it’s pretty much useless to care anymore so I spend my days just playing video games and eating shit.

However lately I’ve been feeling different. I’m suddenly always extremely angry I want to hurt everyone I know or kill them I know everyone fucking hates me and I hate them they can’t stand looking at me I just want to grab a gun and cause a shooting then shoot myself and my mind has been filled with disturbing thoughts. I hate living like this, I hate being me.",1.7423175416133176,4.0277233192488255,3.919242424242426,84.20795454545458,81.06572769953051,6.689628681177977,24.23580879214682,7.84624498591911,1.5224384976525824,829,31,161,15,22,284,120,213,0.314,0.5670000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.9942,2,0,1,3,0,0,15.0,0,0,3,2,6,26,10,1,7,0,13,6,2,1,2,29,39,12,1,4,4,0,5,4,0,0,1,1,0,3,4,9,1,0,8,3,1,2,5,18,0,0,4,8,37,8,15,31,2,16,0,7,2,2,11,4,4,2,13,95,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3428487072673617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880200476364699,0.0,0.10215776942916507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279365041037119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502507607989864,0.10581915757290562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643262193390176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762302928555274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540446054897057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678996767393099,0.2952900468713329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20833884395263003,0.07359002532456395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904612921912278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639950241279995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965555493944994,0.0,0.4068023196935581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102738271294778,0.0,0.0,0.10751518150543167,0.0,0.0,0.11396477740908326,0.0,0.1698340232144778,0.0,0.11619923110902595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275867394242984,0.2013010030367444,0.0,0.09095929789869346,0.0,0.08650205748491634,0.0,0.11244706502376917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040102556515908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572385338752863,0.0,0.15889459220923965,0.0994872412492246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884041753027482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479771963489727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819173088711917,0.0,0.0,0.08208525482862626,0.0,0.21492280047559853,0.0,0.21147559448816972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930176502373251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006973055855618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06843495130737445,0.0,0.0,0.08177805666584488,0.0600656824753214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993670583039563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430307471908126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SlothPersonified,2020/01/05,"My Jailor I'm in a 4 year relationship with a woman who suffers from Borderline Personality Disorder  (BPD ).
Noone can imagine the hell I have been going through. The toxicity, and all those abusive behaviors.I can't stand living with her threats anymore. I can't stand the psychological violence that ensues every 2 days. I can't satisfy her needs. I'm trapped in this prison, this shithole. And I can't leave. She would threat me with suicide. She always says she's going to spread lies and destroy my career. I can't fake my feelings anymore. I don't have a choice I know it, but I just can't keep going. It destroys me. It pains me. I can't feel happy. I'm dedicating every ounce of me for her needs and all I take in return is her extreme anger. I tried going to a psychiatrist myself.To no avail. She said there is no way to be on the safe side. I'm thinking of going to a lawyer. I know you people probably can't help me. I just wanted to share this madness that I have to endure.",1.3902545454545459,3.7584170800000014,3.5314545454545474,85.9357272727273,83.2,6.036363636363637,23.09090909090909,7.348242739294969,1.0548500000000005,776,28,157,12,22,264,111,200,0.287,0.6679999999999999,0.046,-0.9932,0,1,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,1,0,0,3,13,7,0,9,0,18,1,0,0,2,24,38,5,1,4,3,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,10,7,0,2,6,0,0,5,11,10,0,0,2,4,31,3,18,34,2,17,1,1,0,0,17,5,1,0,4,98,41,2,0.0,0.1879936707569209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202310760088246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147087540299848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19983470421988814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232666488602153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18184537491224495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673664738530177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16045294049279898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4508686950460885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16890327216565418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635070495175317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102993564716887,0.0,0.0,0.17439774490112953,0.0,0.0,0.16800474728097986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010528748373233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352981652784212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688321754145994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999926405482577,0.13854133037723454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710691533360216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17034827281128692,0.0,0.0,0.1509280261103194,0.1261778440954398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17355522629640432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929734342123705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166698571969812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772403154371253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358551981260446,0.1259419575046732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11271201747619483,0.0,0.0,0.10217592260198924
mentalhealth,antkj07,2020/01/05,Gratitude in Mental Health Having a gratitude mindset is incredibly important in today's world and I think it's often overlooked // not discussed enough in the conversation of mental health. I wrote about this topic and why I'm investing my time in this practice in 2020 and beyond. I also share a great example of how to get started from Neil Pasricha! You can check it out via this link if you find the topic interesting: [https://medium.com/@antkj07/gratitude-give-it-a-try-ac876cbdbf60](https://medium.com/@antkj07/gratitude-give-it-a-try-ac876cbdbf60). Would love any and everyone's feedback :),13.394224806201553,16.661999197674426,9.346511627906978,53.58201550387603,51.2093023255814,10.38449612403101,34.10077519379845,10.504223727775694,4.053975193798449,505,17,60,10,6,141,63,86,0.011000000000000001,0.727,0.262,0.9753,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,2,0,0,5,4,0,0,4,0,4,3,0,1,0,14,10,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,6,4,12,8,1,11,0,0,0,1,7,8,0,2,3,41,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706797527430184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513959880062166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205300610637523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20394134268856667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19507099207189332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150827378773308,0.4094826692752189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23530713388240945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4537318439043861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19262874856556209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.430174125715901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510667275906966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675721298035476,0.0,0.0,0.1244526464401268,0.0,0.2023065169839363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19258721882347052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516144230137328,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Confessions69420,2020/01/05,"I feel bad whenever I start feeling better? It's like a feeling of guilt that comes whenever I start feeling kinda better. It's like if my brain said to me ""you haven't suffered enough"" or something like that. I don't know how to explain. Is this normal?",2.2329411764705887,4.472012686274514,3.427215686274512,88.6584705882353,79.0,5.648627450980393,25.88627450980392,6.742157984588678,1.1231850980392155,201,8,39,2,5,65,36,51,0.098,0.54,0.36200000000000004,0.904,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,2,1,8,0,1,1,0,3,1,1,1,0,12,13,3,0,2,2,0,4,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,5,7,5,3,12,1,3,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,3,5,23,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974388085182376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41826902274052496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26397369272961585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036940831366832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443320642835979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4782562306743446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12995525020973886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465752849425713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23168597562781024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22493283279492127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820426882789858,0.0,0.0,0.3347429844145604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Teddy_kaonashi,2020/01/05,"Sleeping better and faster So I can't sleep more that an hour for 3 weeks now. I have to wake up to go to work at 5 AM and I'll be home around 10 PM. I wanna watch, play and read stuff but I don't have the time. So as soon as I'm home, I'm in my bed. The problems is it takes so long to finally sleep and I wake up after an hour. This is driving me insane. I have blackouts every single hour and I do not know how my days are going on. Like not a single idea. As if I'm sleep walking for most of my days. No memories or anything. But others say I'm normal. I do my regular stuff, say my regular stuff, but it's not me since I have no memory of it. (pls don't be dementia or sth like that.)

I'm not that much of a spiritual/psychedelic man, but I like to try stuff. Meditation or self therapy even. Maybe some psychedelic kinda books to read before sleep? (not the ""you are the same with the universe"" sorta thing. I'm a Tool fan. XD)

Or ways to improve the quality of sleep, if the quantity of hours is not possible. This is hurting the career I need so bad. Coffee is starting to hurt my physically (my stomach is sensetive and I am officially a caffeine addict now) and weed helps but I can't afford it as much as I need it.

My doctor prescribed meds but anything I've tried has given me hang overs the next days and it'll lead me to lose my job and therefore, become homeless. Me not likey.

So yeah. Anything would be of help. Anything. No harm in trying.

​

p.s: music helps. a lot. but i have this charger problem. can't use my phone to listen to music anymore. anything other than music then.",0.02166811846689853,2.2532943869047664,2.496573751451802,91.75980836236937,88.76190476190477,5.18281068524971,19.802264808362374,6.697824305789354,0.2944208188153317,1238,39,270,16,41,424,169,336,0.126,0.7859999999999999,0.087,-0.9505,2,0,0,0,0,0,54.0,0,1,0,4,11,12,0,0,16,1,28,11,9,4,0,50,44,34,0,9,20,0,0,3,0,2,2,3,3,2,19,11,0,0,2,4,0,6,15,7,0,0,1,4,31,5,36,38,9,34,0,3,1,0,10,8,0,11,22,181,50,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08596376336589619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543953242478812,0.09581764997799422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820312925804072,0.0,0.0,0.32445538706435323,0.0701978102622785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584076444026336,0.0,0.08708932838538926,0.0670999328183098,0.0,0.0,0.06974098052352826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15256516315138766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807115971764627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052083089180651486,0.0,0.06643887291423091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638197287495245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896304087778479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585648537485541,0.0,0.15819630896647052,0.0,0.3106257919695254,0.0,0.16883215843441055,0.08901787684654539,0.0,0.0,0.07825157830054398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04333673344693298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155739434813962,0.0,0.0,0.06978433477271315,0.0,0.08821875316543078,0.0,0.06703983676041518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922060661966596,0.0,0.0875903056344756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159352309172717,0.11694020326930588,0.0,0.0,0.08386335677144874,0.0,0.0772613138212602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889734418479238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15090747613080693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15775299774789311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541757577364926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226312907971005,0.0,0.0,0.06522980284473917,0.0,0.4734726468062483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05581408779326684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36108116700276144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05928926633431359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017774723829726,0.0,0.05238786411217815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045981077668762686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061243143317622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810553958831515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259155524355216,0.06325285251940754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05740749531127265,0.0,0.0,0.05601644287775731,0.0,0.09581764997799422,0.0
mentalhealth,kianoosh_salemi,2020/01/05,"Need advice on my mental ilness Hi, I have a mental problem and its really annoying.
I can't tolerate when I see someone is better than me in anything.
It makes me sad and has a really bad influence on my life.
When I someone is better than me, I feel humiliated, disapointed, I feel I'm useless.
I need help...",1.3067972350230406,3.7142465000000016,4.99331797235023,75.03854838709678,84.0,8.058986175115209,24.98617511520737,8.841846274778883,2.5618820276497707,241,10,44,7,7,90,40,62,0.267,0.6459999999999999,0.087,-0.8998,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,2,7,1,0,2,0,5,1,0,2,0,9,12,4,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,12,2,5,12,0,5,0,2,1,0,2,3,0,0,2,30,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21742246189927508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18309688869473487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857765288992428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3935627842063053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225003339328064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14913571344061508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571569112272771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14851913684685478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44845128607396745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3299588824162903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129005285620777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28507582109042273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17730209206916206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3770436518099023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Khandra99,2020/01/05,Advice! Emotional Support Animal Registration online? Hi! I was wondering if anyone has some info about making your pet an ESA. I’ve read the websites about how it will apply to places that have no pet rules like apartments etc. I have a therapist but he hasn’t diagnosed me? So idk how the whole process works but I know that I definitely have anxiety and depression. My cat helps me and I really want to make him a “official ESA” would love any advice or anyone who has experienced making their pet an ESA.,3.2403125000000017,5.922809072916667,4.74775,78.12225000000002,78.0625,8.840000000000002,24.18333333333333,9.3871,2.587828333333334,405,14,72,12,10,135,70,96,0.1,0.7090000000000001,0.191,0.8672,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,1,5,4,0,0,6,0,9,2,0,5,0,17,17,9,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,11,3,4,14,3,2,0,1,0,1,8,2,0,4,1,47,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38430492501381697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13372064195451652,0.0,0.1504275980934935,0.0,0.0,0.2749878445496826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936409592695845,0.19958351878816424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211913807600535,0.0,0.0,0.21930344558682527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13180236455336716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806714991297704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606743658188588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774735504985549,0.0,0.3937723493501499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20544494830466484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19669129974596192,0.0,0.12597139353771214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22314257050572867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22831197452289026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598223824518168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21953940143519168,0.0,0.0,0.21324561699293293,0.14315486905649294,0.0,0.0,0.1396860549601653,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Absoluteconfuse,2020/01/05,"I want to start a journey towards a better, happier self and I would like to share with you, Reddit 2018 and 2019 has brought me massive changes and damages. I found myself increasingly lonely, confused, unhappy because of work, relationships and my own avoidance to face the problem. I have started therapy for eight weeks now and I have another four sessions left. I am not sure if therapy will carry on after as I am using the state health care which is free. I realized that I need to work on my happiness by myself. 

I live a very lonely life and at the moment I find Reddit being a supportive community as people do really tell the truth here. I would like to talk about my actions today, and hopefully I will share more about my progress with all of you later here.

After thinking about what I can do differently,m I have come up with the following goals:
1. Focus on self-care - l live a lonely life and i work long hours. I am planning time into my calendar for self-care such as cooking, eating properly, doing nothing and do what I like.
2. Change my attitude - I realized I focus too much on work and take work stuff ultra seriously, which led to massive unpaid overtime and exhaustion, ending up having no time for anything else. I would still do my best in my job but I will take it easier than before.
3. Start learning something new - I am going to commit myself to an online language course. I am going to plan in into my calendar and make time for it. Learning is a way to have better sense of achievement and I think it would benefit me in the long run, in my mental health and my career.
4. Stick to my current work out schedule - I am lucky that I have been going to the gym the last two years so I am going to stick to it. Keeping active did help me in the past two years to sleep better and lower my stress levels.

I am sharing this with you Reddit, hopefully this can be helpful to someone or it might echo with some of you. I am posting this here also because I am signing this psychological contract with all of you that I am going to do this. I am going to be sticking to what i said and reporting to you about my progress.

Thank you Reddit.",3.678619589345172,5.387637813679248,5.025416204217539,81.24433407325195,72.98584905660377,7.535405105438403,27.329078801331853,8.219915518859313,1.9323465038845729,1699,63,316,27,34,566,207,424,0.061,0.763,0.175,0.9940000000000001,4,7,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,7,0,16,13,31,0,3,16,0,42,9,2,3,5,62,70,24,0,10,4,0,0,3,0,8,5,1,0,1,19,26,2,2,8,2,1,14,2,10,0,4,5,1,61,22,62,54,8,60,0,4,0,0,17,18,0,8,28,241,80,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620521217722539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681001484332247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812713915949754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093310261782294,0.0,0.07044614826813217,0.0,0.08688047646873742,0.2196567081950088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440747362305169,0.0,0.1751566027930822,0.07131418512651153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471238065822319,0.0691584150219371,0.0,0.07332523913047047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566636471044351,0.0,0.0,0.09077232805555302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28230059856518724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812893745614936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17599869061494375,0.0,0.0,0.11098156364807628,0.0,0.0,0.164453529335596,0.08152910769763111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215391663806933,0.07358542092603383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748294184983665,0.0,0.0,0.08994896741535408,0.0,0.1169506575167204,0.12133751579854785,0.0,0.1462059314732501,0.14652883803931513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05526136449365614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343042689150665,0.08782455861854345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06085841016274201,0.06138595488852045,0.0,0.07995677799067405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794369330352228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903012986353293,0.05739449649384273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928763423864839,0.0,0.0,0.07921655053713826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05303585514993443,0.0,0.0,0.08888289781399351,0.0,0.0,0.07874996382788342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25909655992539593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284738617183937,0.0,0.07014566309448435,0.0637339375446859,0.0,0.0,0.17579246382175726,0.0,0.06611428267090605,0.0,0.09483291375157804,0.0,0.09477199290341802,0.0,0.09394638508609446,0.07802633132508341,0.0,0.12449194124248425,0.06654153530071652,0.0723600096269791,0.07621969733578761,0.18934966655292265,0.0,0.0,0.10609389991046543,0.0,0.0,0.14482234238980946,0.0,0.07847296276508592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16174290739432648,0.0,0.0,0.07150190377553417,0.0,0.06830843853456696,0.04883027022873369,0.06571294181410968,0.0664072174115289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616221438567353,0.0,0.0,0.2352397371904998,0.0,0.0,0.10662499757474954
mentalhealth,Throwitaway7465,2020/01/05,"Multiple suicide attempts I’m so defeated.  I don’t know how to help.  

My friend has tried to commit suicide 4 times in a little over a year and has self harmed more times.  I’ve been supporting them absolutely as much as I can during this time, even if they are mean and try to shut the world at.  They’ve had two inpatient stays (one involuntary, one voluntary, each lasting over 30 days) in the last 6 months. They are currently admitted (involuntary) for their most recent attempt, which I called help for.  Their depression is so severe that they can’t see outside of it, they are incapable of seeing how their lashing out and actions are hurting others. It’s like they are a completely different person than they once were. They are dependent on me for that support, and I’m the only person they are honest with, but at the same time they hate me for giving it.  It’s an emotional roller coaster. They are also battling alcoholism, but haven’t really put any efforts into stopping drinking.  The inpatient stays didn’t help, group/individual therapy hasn’t helped, medications just seemed to escalate the impulsive and bad decisions. It’s like these interventions gave my friend awareness of the issues at hand, but no action or improvement.  I’m lost on how to help at this point. I can’t just not help and let them die. I’m so traumatized from all this myself and feeling so defeated after this last attempt.",6.112437684833125,7.4374491939163505,6.43989226869455,74.91574883819182,66.56653992395438,10.255090832277146,32.10160540768906,10.380263240014207,3.5083199831009733,1130,46,198,29,18,364,156,263,0.174,0.6629999999999999,0.163,-0.8109999999999999,2,0,2,0,0,3,32.0,0,0,15,7,11,16,2,0,11,0,22,4,1,4,2,34,39,22,3,1,8,0,2,2,2,0,2,0,0,3,14,11,2,1,6,2,0,3,8,9,0,3,6,4,24,7,30,32,6,35,0,5,2,0,30,16,0,5,16,135,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351222749940346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494061684895983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223028422063163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868563103436462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845805416768498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136508808099184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850030718288283,0.0,0.0914833836180319,0.0,0.11023507530590833,0.11097274729496392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405090018002837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947830989987995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015443501413103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370582401173811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641238952641269,0.0,0.0,0.10189172985727342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486596438058646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4271646671818625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137060500203818,0.0,0.0,0.11086154280156556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837334340484965,0.2597397932430206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861269835139516,0.0,0.1037832027611314,0.10645598505046712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594692895917423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569998092393452,0.0,0.1070010928193584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478031839236061,0.0,0.07808072400451531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131162006378106,0.14394894650733633,0.08078178800809918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18548681712506848,0.0,0.0,0.10040812108590676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677606510707882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804446513196433,0.0,0.1048751403230243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16928024236468275,0.09669473848652814,0.11080608761635292,0.1199934513022597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264235006992128,0.0,0.08880103933689276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323653629821858,0.2410645215842344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146685244430667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477407984771593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422690820505582,0.0,0.10375725621301113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839939611758854
mentalhealth,NootBoot777,2020/01/05,"I can go from happy to really aggressive in seconds, and it's scaring my friends. My mood changes very fast, my friend will say something funny, and I'll laugh but then five seconds later I'll stop smiling and look down, or look like I want to rip someone's throat out. It weirds people out, and it scares my girlfriend. I often think about hurting people, but no one i care about. Only random strangers. I'm scared to go to a doctor because I don't want a label bout on me. Over half of my family has mental health disorders, so my chances are high.",4.967415584415587,5.461600754545459,5.342207792207791,84.75045454545456,68.72727272727272,7.740259740259741,29.350649350649352,7.447530270364453,1.668155844155844,433,15,86,4,7,138,79,110,0.168,0.613,0.21899999999999997,0.6759999999999999,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,4,13,1,3,2,0,5,3,1,0,0,15,14,9,0,2,3,0,0,1,3,1,2,1,0,0,3,6,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,6,0,5,0,3,12,6,14,13,0,13,0,1,2,0,4,7,0,3,5,52,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220122826122602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170935941826079,0.0,0.1773572740679396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192147712167202,0.17160249428965946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805067142649712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590604254904305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19056495285123495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17847238259343434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17820994189906672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17713722608772411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17947866550273578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190800194813222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815767665777076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689572970912467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136076964023918,0.12750955209524625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23246240866352064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740439751924633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332637181907273,0.5035571682453864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205394938862295,0.1290693841772574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14016749357298572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10742686592058136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383333344120634,0.1977750991208677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alpacalicious,2020/01/05,"Please help me....Intrusive thoughts in social situations only?  The problem is…when I socialize with people after a while I start having intrusive thoughts. I feel dazed in a sense! Like I went out with a few friends before, for like 5 hours. And after 4 hours I started having intrusive thoughts, loud thoughts that I dont have when alone. This basically makes it difficult to enjoy the company. I get distracted by these thoughts and have paranoia. I’m taking serouqel because of this, maybe I need to up the dose. So I’m afraid that with crush it will happen the same….I get so down when I have these thoughts. My mind becomes overactive. ",3.714047619047616,6.414966168067231,3.8455672268907577,85.15445728291319,76.39495798319328,7.328011204481792,29.24439775910364,8.344100000000001,2.3603775910364138,510,23,93,10,12,157,77,119,0.11,0.7340000000000001,0.156,0.753,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,4,9,0,2,7,0,7,1,0,1,0,17,25,7,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,7,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,7,2,10,4,15,17,1,15,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,11,55,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457241577223952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857702325613622,0.15539357865836548,0.1197264794858879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490092574411622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07114282646653984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870550833775816,0.0,0.14702128864384606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442173266771643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430914414829704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771249608455559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374791378782894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09391923880960996,0.0,0.14135341027824214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420682466730786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432826278462123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700971136130258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754459507023837,0.0,0.0,0.15444782245373356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13463218282322928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581542043390676,0.0,0.2868545998697364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19917826908406835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057898992049594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6702068976216706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043155430034462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stars-eat-art-books,2020/01/05,"Online communities for schizophrenia. I don't have access to healthcare. I can't afford it, and the only provider near me is 3 hours away even if I could. I have no family or friends except for my husband and a pen pal in Germany who also has Sz.

For years, I used r/schizophrenia as a support network. I could talk to people about coping mechanisms, dealing with symptoms, and stuff like that. That subreddit has become a dumpster for low effort memes, selfies, and karma-whoring crap. The mods are totally cool with people in crisis being ignored, because the shitposts get more ""upvotes.""

Does anyone know of an online forum that is as easy to use as reddit for people to discuss schizophrenia-related issues? I'm feeling very lost and alone right now, with the only community I have known for so many years having been set adrift in a sea of bullshit.",6.770696202531648,7.669485436708863,6.703645569620253,75.14230379746837,64.8860759493671,8.092151898734178,33.52151898734177,7.908726449838941,2.66663341772152,681,28,109,7,10,216,111,158,0.14400000000000002,0.763,0.09300000000000001,-0.8055,1,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,5,8,1,0,9,1,15,2,1,2,1,20,23,12,0,3,3,1,1,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,6,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,2,9,4,25,18,2,12,0,2,0,0,7,7,1,2,5,78,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17936958541974896,0.0,0.1384976461007425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109643383174168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627149635646671,0.0,0.0,0.10557323711003792,0.19127152434080325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27655158362655685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17854827588639274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15155718166566018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143884336307789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16326536670636785,0.0,0.08756859184049537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13380390916742407,0.0,0.09048310178659943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17055438889900795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18076231714229152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517909048126937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461045975667883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18905415723564167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558451734146654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634331584105499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3601983470239068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790082089139325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19825777309290027,0.0,0.1965306471530937,0.0,0.18000768930251912,0.0,0.1392012154935583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29915606457462146,0.0,0.1428974794390767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22305360399826876
mentalhealth,xspyder,2020/01/05,"shitty but that's life. OK so i grew up in  a middle class family with two elder brothers , i was the youngest, my parents had me because they  really wanted  a girl. but  that didn't turn out well for them because what they got was me, now they totally regret their wish. so from childhood on wards the more liked siblings were my brothers they were given more food the leftover was for me,i thought maybe because i'm small they are doing this, i grew up but still the same they hated me because i didn't wear what they liked or acted like what they want. they were not  all bad they bought me good food gave me education,WiFi etc but they definitely hit me whenever they got a chance,with unimaginable things umbrella, stick ,pan broom, hanger, belt ,punched my face, most probably broke my nose but it healed i think ,big wound from the broken umbrella that  also healed on it's own i think. threw a tantrum so my mom stripped me naked and kept hitting me with the stick. i even peed myself once when they were hitting me i was in like tenth grade. hitting continued till like twelfth grade.even on my birthday i confessed i hated them  and didn't attend school that day because my mom fought with me simply..now i'm almost 20  and i don't fight with them much ,but because of them i had to choose the shittiest college do the degree in a shitty state, but they  agreed to this after great debates  and crying .their original wish was for me to stay  at  home doing part time and earning for them.which i will do after college ,but they keep finding reasons for me to quit college. i topped my exams but they wished i failed so i can come back, now they keep delaying my return to college because they r scared of my safety it seems. i kinda told them they r useless which worsened the problem ,so the conclusion is folks life is shitty but we learn to survive because that is the only way.",3.675867100290058,5.651979555858311,3.785134921332517,89.01108024962645,73.6049046321526,6.370361255163928,26.007647007119626,7.1029339738359605,1.1312714951217369,1495,52,292,15,31,459,190,367,0.17300000000000001,0.687,0.14,-0.961,1,0,0,0,2,0,34.0,1,0,26,6,13,21,5,1,16,1,25,10,3,2,2,52,55,24,0,7,12,5,0,5,0,1,5,0,2,1,15,12,2,4,10,0,1,6,5,12,1,2,24,1,67,9,32,26,10,38,1,4,0,0,38,14,0,5,20,197,82,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942156906858687,0.0,0.0,0.07939976249231626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634555944058424,0.08290048155796946,0.4841953744677865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552694229301075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906208600129856,0.06403188866220491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073122866620357,0.13115622854045364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359892896863484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09074650150782104,0.0,0.2401164220334612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832772086652065,0.15881773680400427,0.10946424659485693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960506757362506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09959293687964713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650166058780745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025866128622058,0.242533017642744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974711706215574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23256742331986055,0.0,0.0,0.07298735482708626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573739393305738,0.0,0.07551222276797327,0.0,0.0,0.110246442103633,0.1075181245142383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704815789853976,0.09500423140812818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560392531471192,0.0,0.0,0.06360578214309053,0.1020835522516467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940358830673318,0.10048372501813736,0.0,0.09038713815487186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582671073701096,0.07929071093930602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596185812261299,0.12723817623640707,0.0,0.07882277211110092,0.05789503681648892,0.0,0.0,0.09487296478696497,0.0,0.0,0.10799572388853483,0.09698895305665978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712406715708115,0.07880938374979728,0.0,0.0,0.08927091942156275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34252538308891584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iAngelicx,2020/01/05,"Mentally ill since I was 11 - help me 😪 TRIGGER WARNINGS
I’ve been mentally ill since I was 11 years old, and probably before that to be honest. Hallucinations, self harm, anxiety, depression, mania, BPD, paranoia, delusions, OCD, insomnia, problems with pharmaceutical drugs, painkillers, etc etc...

I got into lots of criminal things when I was manic at 13/14/15/16, I also went to psychiatric units a number of times between 13-14, then had a child when I was 18 and have tried to hold it together. I had to move back in with my mum, with my partner too. He has Aspergers and found it hard to live with them. I accepted that but needed help. Fast forward 4 years, we got a house. He loves it and I’m so happy that he does. However I feel like I am actually drowning, I can’t cope with every day things, with intrusive thoughts and thinking in the night someone will hurt us etc. I have been having panic attacks every day since Christmas ended. It didn’t even feel like Christmas came. Even when I’m sat there, it feels like the day has whizzed past me and I’ve done NOTHING. I am getting scared all of the time, I stayed in all summer because of wasps and bees and my paranoia was at LARGE. I now have a thing about not wanting my son to step on drains incase they fall. I am so stressed that my chest hurts and I constantly want to burst into tears, but my upbringing taught me not to cry so I try so hard not to, however recently I haven’t been able to help it. I feel like if this carries on, especially after the end of the “fun” season, and back to reality and a summer of bugs and terror for me, I will end up not here any longer. I want to be the best mum I can, my son deserves it more than anyone I know, he is so lovely and just the most amazing little guy. I just don’t think I am any good for him, I am fearful the effects of my illnesses will start to rub off on him. Guys I just don’t want to be here anymore, but I also don’t want to be dead. I just want this to stop. I REALLY want to be normal and boring and just plain 😞 my partner doesn’t understand, which means he can’t really be there for me... his work also stops him being there for me... and I don’t blame him. Please tell me if there is anything I can do to stop feeling like this, I can’t keep on taking diazepam, I’m running low 😢 I live in Devon UK (if anyone knows of anything or anywhere that can help me)",2.846585418464194,4.185687209016393,4.192601380500431,87.87690250215704,74.45081967213116,7.267989646246765,25.342105263157894,7.85451343220497,1.2574663934426231,1850,61,398,26,38,611,237,488,0.15,0.682,0.168,0.9209,2,0,1,0,0,1,69.0,2,0,2,3,29,27,1,5,13,0,48,8,1,2,2,77,84,35,2,13,16,4,8,5,2,3,5,0,0,6,19,26,0,5,15,0,0,7,14,13,0,0,20,8,61,14,54,54,9,55,0,4,0,2,31,17,0,6,37,260,80,2,0.07243725320386969,0.0,0.07068830992758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17378413564882753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851963231577222,0.0,0.055414300431479414,0.0,0.07183829070766351,0.10129962338034684,0.0,0.11921937466562425,0.0,0.0,0.0824078329008087,0.0,0.11139955285795776,0.0,0.04415707721480256,0.0,0.06163876722069672,0.0,0.07601842821408403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123218462401264,0.0,0.0,0.08284892016078624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827893690772922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956892125308278,0.14014810719616574,0.0,0.06239010004114608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339032842474156,0.07412845970469557,0.0,0.0,0.08400421641064994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924737174683644,0.0,0.2423600557363265,0.09568824513830064,0.0,0.12206302003474605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151204860950508,0.18313225857903667,0.2587459408124604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794237092679773,0.0,0.0,0.037845475061651035,0.0,0.0,0.060756931225205625,0.11586937731229692,0.0,0.0,0.14344853848111278,0.0,0.07711080300076939,0.12977910148825436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19421265564315546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358286458548274,0.15509115547529628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438555893833893,0.0,0.0,0.07961923992603398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769459148421043,0.07260115765950155,0.12792684338203272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061583562293242036,0.13075489831135756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890540444746025,0.0,0.0,0.14599942761143914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769893364247906,0.0,0.0537113054015668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797745509772565,0.07097312825467318,0.06950549809263541,0.0,0.07601071197990728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498950915664807,0.0,0.0,0.06914955462914052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951435151896613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809961058341634,0.0693126684513718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281031852854983,0.0,0.07152304864348089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252232723806637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075567853069545,0.0,0.0,0.17976253318848398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06137584957186727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0512714606501951,0.07720847383210452,0.0,0.18168236161176904,0.08297662880510126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05446379948191878,0.0,0.06331335210135823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14437227694148594,0.09282973392990114,0.0,0.0575070877241721,0.08447748973627163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836028003849434,0.0,0.0,0.07540973522217001,0.08713309664051087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990775810691042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715005943777237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052735183055938974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329443222931226
mentalhealth,PeanutsAndJams,2020/01/05,"I often get upset because I ruined SOMETHING, I'm just not sure what Does anyone else experience this? I could be doing nothing, sitting in bed, and all of a sudden I feel like I did something wrong, and that I ruined something. It can ruin my whole day sometimes.",6.2794117647058805,6.439336549019608,7.0047058823529404,75.12117647058824,65.86274509803923,7.584313725490197,32.68627450980392,6.42735559955562,2.137203921568627,208,8,35,1,3,69,41,51,0.314,0.6409999999999999,0.045,-0.9344,0,0,3,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,1,1,0,5,0,0,0,2,9,8,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,7,2,2,5,2,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,26,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684753936751514,0.24687816092384196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468787487861724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19237617264480514,0.0,0.0,0.1553905581928828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21085390409511529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20127988148584372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356919090358985,0.0,0.0,0.12182978901265565,0.1721322263027645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588460049638842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771428823699652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23119466317810794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5564771571854871,0.2383022474916341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270892228647271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690081603030166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634371711299753,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,allywilliams242,2020/01/05,"Medication for anxiety? I am a 21 year old female. I’ve been struggling with anxiety for about 2 years now. I have constant fear of dying, my family members dying, just a constant state of impending doom. I constantly think something is wrong with me, i’m either having a heart attack, have some weird illness, or i’m losing my mind. I have these feelings nearly every day. I’ve been to therapy and I’ve managed to try to not be medicated for the last 2 years. 

However, it’s starting to impede on my day to day life. My anxiety flares up when I’m alone at night, and I can’t control my thoughts which causes me to stay up at night until 4-5am, or I have restless sleep. This causes me to be extremely tired therefore causing me to be unmotivated during the day, depressed, and feeling pretty worthless. (I also don’t have any traumatic event like the death of a family member that caused this, I just developed it when I moved to university and started thinking about my future, growing up, and realizing I have led a privileged life and that one day, I will face hardships and potentially a traumatic event.) 

I am not looking for therapy or anything or sympathy. I just want to know what your experiences are on anxiety meds? Did they help? I am scared of becoming a “zombie” or losing my creativity and stuff. I’ve tried lots of alternative ways to cope and some have been helpful but I’m ready to look into meds because I can’t keep doing this almost every night. I do have family history of anxiety, most of my mothers side of the family has anxiety as well. So anyways, tell me if y’all recommend medication? How has it helped your lives? 

Thank you so much! :-)",5.212602272727274,6.345957737500001,6.639602272727274,73.36698863636367,68.5,10.06818181818182,32.35795454545455,10.230975488527342,3.5115937500000003,1316,57,236,34,22,449,175,320,0.147,0.752,0.10099999999999999,-0.7864,1,1,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,4,1,3,14,16,1,4,11,0,29,10,3,8,0,48,46,24,3,2,13,1,2,1,0,1,7,0,0,0,12,12,0,2,7,0,0,3,5,12,1,1,5,4,34,4,39,37,6,41,1,5,2,0,10,10,0,11,26,162,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778622007551361,0.08053259199202227,0.0,0.0621820828719971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05287728869760642,0.0,0.3569024235696995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06398721903809923,0.0,0.0,0.0884595824977022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04739982204655088,0.08587627380296159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195106005331537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252082423483572,0.08721086019655927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507335086568447,0.0,0.06697181575291121,0.0,0.1613985591901614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102691104229164,0.0,0.0,0.07606106831953888,0.29320875403984026,0.08749801486963342,0.07863234629776973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214217942781673,0.15635622697397988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911381433148651,0.0,0.0,0.042733102392820174,0.06338216802809686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109843851238965,0.03798804361339518,0.0,0.06866067676749027,0.0,0.1305922527086704,0.17397993397917638,0.0,0.06610604862936477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17274054602568847,0.2349953791689144,0.0,0.0,0.07851219950874844,0.0,0.0,0.08264317015968126,0.05716019297796944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21890846120558885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08159267888028279,0.0,0.05269001835112926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910661713589487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778481190855115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781295253423902,0.0,0.0,0.05986098157277196,0.0,0.0,0.11007332297216901,0.0828784002692262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812882875629851,0.08901292999241978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796286828895852,0.07158801218739799,0.17784334903814664,0.0,0.0,0.09964683231866968,0.0,0.0617302117004108,0.0,0.08937000024500909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558352283132172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04586297377760905,0.0617197265784662,0.0,0.0,0.06991269917297525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501485160515714,0.0,0.15021848470943375
mentalhealth,HowYouLiving,2020/01/05,"Live chat help and support Some of you may have seen me post before about my plans to help those in need but if not here you go. I want to build a community for those using games and films to escape their lives for a while. Over the past few years I have seen more and more people become part of online communities via YouTube and twitch only to be shunned when they opened up about their lives so I have created my own YouTube and twitch to build a community where people like us will not be pushed aside and left to suffer on top of those channels today I made a discord server so the community can have somewhere to go and chat 24hrs a day if you like this idea or want to help people like I do then please join the server 

https://discord.gg/SjGTeH",8.299671814671816,6.716488851351353,7.166525096525098,81.33986486486488,62.51351351351353,10.078764478764477,29.926640926640932,8.418075326091056,1.8219776061776067,602,13,125,6,7,182,90,148,0.05,0.74,0.21,0.9655,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,3,3,2,8,5,0,0,8,0,10,2,0,2,0,22,20,16,0,5,6,0,0,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,1,5,0,3,2,1,0,0,3,2,15,4,19,13,6,19,0,1,2,0,13,8,0,5,10,82,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839262939218672,0.14171015202992976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074021565376523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892928699169676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3348773774804681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18799924726397468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18094221133068336,0.0,0.0,0.24408371832196596,0.0,0.4411638951052003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15758070343839645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348457954925307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266583844343014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18034261804507848,0.15897777228755344,0.3463659699122131,0.0,0.0,0.18280688194118305,0.0,0.0,0.15949577057479966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18898345531313124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785696957274106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003227015808865,0.14383392000218176,0.0,0.0,0.1964548861192089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072439373051139
mentalhealth,Nathanally_Boi,2020/01/05,"My dad is very insensitive After I got out of the mental hospital and I was discharged, my stepdad started joking about it and I felt bad about maybe he thinks I wasn't going to kill myself but if hadn't been put in the hospital I wouldn't be here posting on reddit or even be alive for that matter. I just want to know why he would do this....?",2.2325000000000017,3.783030583333337,3.84,88.90500000000002,76.5,6.466666666666668,21.722222222222207,7.1686216300943375,0.5644555555555546,270,7,58,3,6,90,55,72,0.055,0.804,0.141,0.6088,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,1,0,2,0,10,0,0,0,0,14,17,5,1,4,4,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,6,1,9,1,10,7,0,8,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,2,42,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435221664884499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19263729427368512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800373249954136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16575590756263395,0.0,0.2332654685260121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226762570120316,0.0,0.1602875560034639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930095651008684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939225676040428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27932764943153104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931967490191508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064369649341592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18688260764481865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24064831490328584,0.17202738781490934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631758930182617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071854062530595,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sirchugh,2020/01/05,"Ugly Truths About Working From Home Remote working can look all glitter and gold but it comes with it's set of own challenges. It's not everybody's cup of tea and can take a toll on your mental health too.

[https://medium.com/better-programming/ugly-truths-about-working-from-home-e9907c7091ba](https://medium.com/better-programming/ugly-truths-about-working-from-home-e9907c7091ba)",20.002325581395347,27.11391900000001,8.894232558139535,46.61297674418606,45.04651162790698,5.300465116279073,22.55348837209302,6.742157984588678,0.6871060465116279,339,6,34,2,5,77,35,43,0.052000000000000005,0.867,0.081,0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,0,3,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,2,8,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,6,5,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,20,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4116657214521784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20047832168059407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473836169471213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7003486024954491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954365683024596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23453948089896576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17498577175618668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388638616301749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamahumanrocket,2020/01/05,"My meds stopped working. My meds stopped working, all my relationships are crumbling in my hands, I lost my job and I have scary medical stuff going on. I keep telling everyone I'm trying to get better but I'm scared my mental illness is becoming med-resistant. I feel so alone but I'm too agitated and hostile to trust myself around people. I'm just laying in bed with constant migraines and freezing cold sweats that wake me up every time I sleep. Everyone keeps swearing they want to be there for me and support me but what if I CAN'T get better? I'm completely nonfunctional and it's getting worse every day. I'm probably going to a psych hospital tomorrow but last time I did that it just made things a LOT worse. I feel like I'm racing a clock. If I can't get better, I really need to leave my husband so he'll have a shot. 

People act like suicide is so selfish. It's really not. Sometimes you don't just FEEL like a burden, what do you do when you ARE a burden? What do you do when literally everything just gets worse and worse to the point where you can't even sit alone quietly in a dark room without needing constant supervision? What do you do when you're just costing your family hundreds of dollars because you're sick and can't work?",3.7239516129032246,5.474783491935483,4.900032258064517,82.01754838709681,72.95161290322581,8.024516129032259,28.93225806451613,8.697196308434329,2.3065461290322578,998,41,191,19,20,329,135,248,0.261,0.639,0.10099999999999999,-0.9931,1,2,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,7,1,7,16,14,1,1,8,0,19,8,4,1,1,35,45,19,1,5,13,1,5,3,0,1,4,1,2,0,11,9,0,4,3,0,2,3,7,6,0,0,3,7,29,8,16,40,2,26,0,1,0,0,12,9,0,3,16,114,40,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981843965799619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851725404810294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058323623379859926,0.105667389333883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25385477686412194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031519119480677,0.20678502848244407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061703551178951176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319355269119924,0.0,0.16122347895635414,0.18284635860465176,0.08598804146492553,0.0,0.0901954701723506,0.0,0.14513103065371824,0.13670289570664412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499356131963008,0.0,0.1087505378221847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494435361453099,0.17008367978497524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798927374535818,0.0,0.10130780216188624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022839662579967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444241141830064,0.08134090207349906,0.0,0.09053159929817144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188257080038993,0.09638420145118433,0.09641960209755666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14188610954673778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266034277212338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904453993420156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315565615049196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225858776225658,0.0,0.0,0.1027209611626174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578905958581008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574578852268313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462669479510634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15997999719444242,0.0,0.0,0.10952692184618654,0.10465477204874242,0.1085727762160978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362564589393172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356334279000815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157969698688802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495819345782697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056432591815612186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222891681871337,0.0,0.20896131375231744,0.0,0.3900108919827873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alreadygone25,2020/01/05,Beginning of a manic episode What do you do when you feel mania creeping up on you? I  just want to calm down but it feels like trying to stop an avalanche,1.8602083333333328,3.8423204375000033,2.5825,95.54583333333336,79.0,5.5166666666666675,23.166666666666664,6.42735559955562,0.375341666666666,122,4,27,1,3,38,28,32,0.08,0.746,0.174,0.3071,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,6,2,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,6,6,0,6,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5584164714794914,0.39449083520088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697763741230603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4616628081097971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3749066449230021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3257010784272538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vdrthjvdd,2020/01/05,"My current war in life (I'm currently 16) Ever since I was a child I had issues many issues I was cruel mean and heartless I didn't know pain I only caused it.   
I didn't have any real friends I never trusted anyone and I was super introverted and never talked to anyone out of school   
when I was 12 the teachers started harassing me verbally and always accused me of stuff and destroyed me it lasted 2 years I had anxiety and I stopped going to school I never got any support cause my parents never understood and teachers hated me friends weren't even an option for me then after those 2 hellish years I got a school transfer I was put into a problem child class since my old teachers had a lot of stuff to say about me even though I wasn't like that during those times. things were getting better, I had no confidence and I was afraid of the new school. I cut off all my old friends and it was a fresh start, I made a few friends and soon Id regret this decision.  we had a lot in common we had nice chats and I got to talking to them out of school but I never trusted them. soon enough they started harassing me and abusing me verbally and physically for 3 years. my confidence was even further ruined I developed social anxiety and I lost the will to live I had insomnia daily and I went through hell but it was only starting.  
a year later I was late to English class and sat by the only kid that had a spot open next to them, we started talking and we had a lot in common. I got to trust him and I shared with him everything and we were very close. the semester ended and we still talked a lot I got my confidence up and I had will to live again he gave me meaning in life, then the next semester started I was transferred to a new class and it was very difficult for me since I had social anxiety, soon enough this friend of mine stopped talking to me and it was as if I never existed he was mean and disgusting he used me and threw me away. only then I realized I had separation anxiety I couldn't see him with other people while I was completely alone and I stopped going to school and started abusing drugs to fill up his hole i was broken I was in a very deep depression and I had a lot of anxiety and suicidal thoughts.  
until he returned I stopped taking drugs for some time and he heard me out gave me support and love I felt alive again then everything crumbled to shit again he got very drunk I was spotting for him then I started having anxiety randomly so I sat on the side until everyone left and it was only the 2 of us then we sat on a bench and I started breaking down and having a panic attack I tried to ask him for help and I turned to other friends and i was just thrown to the trash everyone I came to trust abandoned me and i'm broken and depressed I'm abusing drugs again this time heavy drugs I cant stop without any support withdrawals are too hard for me to handle alone and I just don't have anyone to turn to and I hate myself and I hurt myself I don't wanna get out of bed and I don't want to keep living like this I don't want to be nice when nobody cares when I'm destroyed. I need a real friend or someone to love and support me my parents aren't an option I'm afraid to be a burden and same thing for my friends I cant stop being sorry and I'm just so done and I could use some help right now I don't think I can walk this path alone again and I need to vent.  
If you took some time off your day and read this thank you.",1.51879753521127,3.6004958652777788,3.1313184663536795,90.67454225352115,80.625,6.000782472613459,23.19640062597809,7.140073416326624,0.8339381846635372,2733,94,577,35,71,901,270,720,0.223,0.653,0.12300000000000001,-0.9972,4,3,4,0,0,2,21.0,8,3,4,3,25,56,15,3,29,0,61,12,1,5,8,128,128,69,2,11,9,2,2,2,8,2,8,2,1,3,23,65,1,8,10,3,0,9,21,29,0,0,61,5,114,27,73,60,13,104,2,7,1,2,58,25,2,14,71,404,137,12,0.0,0.15833725878154173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840698781185048,0.0,0.0,0.037065391384680735,0.0,0.0,0.09087732148268994,0.0,0.20446293095812576,0.0,0.0,0.09344166460655184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041643992132182735,0.050676891817968174,0.04185192624527855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039396839636595085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050948139472096775,0.04541706551714216,0.09152091656284536,0.0,0.0,0.0467050675520466,0.0,0.0,0.03556592530702855,0.0,0.0,0.02872813670282145,0.0,0.07673387926856512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04558547168215372,0.0,0.0,0.20663436653745168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03945405598230357,0.09205473636646168,0.0,0.08826556911698548,0.04029391906561502,0.0,0.08513019243209195,0.08006917471728726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042770627494385635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27532569667223844,0.0,0.046546328861903165,0.0,0.050632423213379484,0.0,0.2137624431698768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039903982757741215,0.0879588394298908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597157660458992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04768683650136457,0.0,0.0,0.09298777443978852,0.0,0.03959405180433516,0.0,0.0,0.024481019985182016,0.03631049550150862,0.050249219417897215,0.0,0.04839877289238932,0.0,0.06292755187094189,0.043525323593343684,0.0,0.11800337251597255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04862663194368616,0.1893547866897677,0.08040803408056943,0.042149991546193734,0.0,0.04516210500005667,0.0,0.14556919546167538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06605978867356767,0.2061372304799835,0.08604456616624281,0.09474920465153724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348593434434793,0.0,0.0,0.1693941490509787,0.04739951038712995,0.05226449973970137,0.09892492400032228,0.0,0.0,0.03088221333605172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042623989456837104,0.0,0.04478049108299531,0.0,0.0,0.04455751487727627,0.10140497199800018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03804157965535054,0.0,0.035424337909172536,0.0,0.27049430360785176,0.035496964493573605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04572527480408116,0.11054539509953937,0.0,0.0,0.09081697395151538,0.03774322390849915,0.0,0.0,0.04986499575160877,0.28376555430864703,0.0,0.035574062091859066,0.2234519962614437,0.0,0.0,0.10198778914072774,0.04872550348519493,0.20219864158514814,0.0,0.0,0.03349264235188527,0.17901976795681088,0.0,0.04101147492051969,0.0,0.0,0.05918804885844475,0.02854293225692994,0.043765688519193935,0.03536411965683029,0.1038992643714222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049491645370131815,0.03024344346426149,0.09690533838716088,0.0,0.0,0.053582703934596534,0.0769459506127657,0.0,0.14701867951422007,0.05254813316892101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04129408792722577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04294023406589583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474326366510301
mentalhealth,advice-throw-away202,2020/01/05,"Bipolar and took ecstasy Hello, sorry if this is wrong forum. I took ecstasy for the first time on New Year’s Eve (Tuesday). It was the best. I didn’t prepare but I did take serotonin supplements before and after. I was fine. Friday night, I can’t remember if I took my pills before going to bed.  Yesterday (Saturday), I have never felt so out of control In my life. It was like bipolar on crack. I just kept escalating things and I just don’t know how to explain it other than that. Today, it was even worse. I woke up crying because my boyfriend didn’t have his arm over me. This isn’t like me. At the moment, I feel okay and I’m hopeful the worst of it has past. Is this because I took ecstasy? I’ve forgotten to take pills before, but it’s never like this. Especially when it was just one dose. Is there anything I can do to help? Is there something I should’ve done before or after? Any advice? I am desperate. Thank you!",0.4195721925133711,2.8512327326203253,2.534686631016044,90.21285347593586,90.65775401069521,5.344941176470589,20.31422459893048,6.918507183188421,0.6254420962566845,719,24,146,11,25,241,109,187,0.109,0.6970000000000001,0.193,0.9531,0,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,0,3,9,10,0,0,4,1,22,7,1,2,2,24,38,12,0,3,8,0,2,3,0,0,6,0,1,0,14,5,0,2,5,0,0,5,7,2,0,2,16,2,22,8,17,22,2,29,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,4,20,103,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12340389283817148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587788860324062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10392150210292056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15396389405689734,0.0,0.4298357239542917,0.0,0.1325279430405958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14163896677425392,0.0,0.0,0.1387177518842267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923303620227805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834098165357343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385331058281912,0.0,0.12125306259669577,0.0,0.0,0.10741765392186686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177047358166752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464593510258323,0.0,0.0,0.12542914619290388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940273787388056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919857894375904,0.18508889495125755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947970057580593,0.12196649638622326,0.0,0.11850958391122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557374324424864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205529823816514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430558842622007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722008888515217,0.0,0.14136532020830095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899006723787241,0.0,0.0,0.11626593358662675,0.0,0.0,0.08389790626933584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363759164062073,0.0,0.11970307671252622,0.0,0.5612275456903965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286948413321001,0.0,0.13807243403724676,0.0,0.08132317051906833
mentalhealth,Snapdown_City,2020/01/05,"Overwhelming fear of losing my personality and conversational ability I've always been gifted when it comes to speaking to others, but for nearly a year I've been consumed by a fear which is severely comprimising my happiness. Whenever I say something funny or intelligent I become overwhelmed by a fear that I'll lose my knack for wit and that I'll lose the conversational skills that I've almost come to define myself by. I obsess over the possibility that I may gradually reduce over time to a boring standard Joe that never has anything interesting to say, and I my fear is that that if I let go and stop worrying about it this will happen. I no longer enjoy speaking to others because of this, and I'm never present in a conversation. I don't know whether this is a rational thought or what to do about it/ensure I don't lose my personality and intelligence over time. Any advice is appreciated, I know this most likely sounds extremely bizarre.",10.175550847457624,8.507369627118653,10.638750000000002,58.195074152542404,58.943502824858754,13.369774011299436,40.204096045197744,12.161744961471696,4.9908536723163825,772,32,128,20,8,264,99,177,0.249,0.614,0.13699999999999998,-0.9693,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,5,3,16,0,7,8,0,13,0,0,0,2,23,21,12,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,5,0,2,17,8,0,1,3,0,0,3,5,12,0,0,3,5,16,4,21,15,1,16,0,6,0,0,9,5,0,6,9,91,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798305495227725,0.0,0.0,0.12090092731526518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046307394769896,0.0,0.0,0.08210547833809984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935647904892904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360031420160615,0.13334481990573324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20800892061019133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5434519463045482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861776831984671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676756194289996,0.12852706037555067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270808315829258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346203047593468,0.0,0.058986127481751874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5402964506097275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862400391617396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21084624004726396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611312166701509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19203023337767086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639873943341613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294944288705753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094175719155493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585189945270066,0.14080573669554974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226145501691434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775083812653265
mentalhealth,fonehome769,2020/01/05,"I can clean my house everyday but my brain does not function for organizing. I cook, do dishes, sweep, vacuum,  mop, fold laundry, clean bathroom,  and dust.  I clean. When it comes to household objects tho I dont know what to do with them sometimes so I make piles. Why can't my brain function for organization but I can clean very quickly and efficiently.  I'm asking because between my partner and I it sometimes causes issues.  I get frustrated that he doesn't help with what I consider the important task and he gets frustrated that I'll pile up desks with things that I don't know where to put. No were not hoarders. I just for some reason really stuck at organization.  It's like my brain gets jumbled.  Is there an explanation for this?",3.318357142857142,5.893843264285714,4.324285714285715,81.87071428571429,77.07142857142857,7.428571428571428,27.142857142857146,8.418075326091056,2.1330714285714287,587,24,109,12,14,190,88,140,0.11900000000000001,0.735,0.146,0.4712,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,0,7,3,2,0,2,0,10,5,3,3,0,19,20,9,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,1,10,8,2,0,3,1,0,2,7,2,0,0,2,0,17,1,13,18,1,8,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,4,69,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16540629972159432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785529888731853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5925394522538053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18175654374992284,0.0,0.15241011228693307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548332283306979,0.0,0.20736143650074654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773169295909783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859290369353567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20415424684638106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18466965943864588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944729466044645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643939198850575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810260122394906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17786419962436667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334632267473024,0.18191420439210435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3499779286130413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11754488040365432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14598633874494196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596524167771846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayadvice102,2020/01/05,"Is this OCD? I need help. This is from an email I sent to a youtuber I frequently watch. Figured it would also be a good question for [r/OCD](https://www.reddit.com/r/OCD/).

My question is in regard to my theme and whether it is OCD at all or not.

My theme has been on physical fighting, being attacked, and physical altercations for the last two years or so. I have had OCD off and on for four years. 

Generally in any given day I will obsess over a handful of real events that have taken place in the past. These events will entail someone staring at me aggressively, sometimes cocking their head quickly to me as they pass me in a store corridor, sometimes turning in a restaurant line to stare back at me after I've been staring at them, sometimes having a, ""Hey, you got a problem?"" look. People looking at me like they want to ""start something"" physical because I want to ""start something"".

These events *actually happened*. They are not false memories. They are not hypotheticals. Usually they have occurred when I am in the midst of obsessing and enter a public place with the feeling of hyper arousal, fear, fight or flight. The obsession (if I stare at someone, or even if I don't, someone here will pick up on my body language and vibes and want to fight me, or at least stare back and make it seem like they're feeling aggression towards me) kicks in and I end up feeling a sense of confirmation from the environment. I can't tell if what I'm feeling is real or not. I can't tell what's real and what's not at this point.

Because I've had people stare back and ""size me up"" in many of these real events from the past, it's hard to tell what is OCD distorting my perception and what's not.

Basically, people sizing me up and staring / behaving aggressively = this being something I should be afraid of rather than purely all in my head, OCD. The fact that people HAVE done these things many times validates my fears and anxieties, no?

I do however realize how OCD works. The more I act with fear, do compulsions, analyze, ruminate, reassure, the more I'm telling my mind to generate the perception of people wanting to fight me so I can reassure myself more and be less afraid. But the line between reality and OCD distortion has become very blurred in the last few months, so I need help.

THIS IS LESS ME SEEKING REASSURANCE AND MORE SEEKING KNOWLEDGE OF HOW MY OCD WORKS SO I CAN PRECEDE WITH ERP (exposure and response prevention) THERAPY. 

If this is OCD, my theme has been particularly tricky to figure out, which has lead to it being hard to treat.

I haven't encountered anyone with my particular type of OCD (if it is even OCD) so I want more information. I also just don't know anymore. I feel panic and terror at times. 

This thing, whether OCD or not, generates a sense of isolation and worthlessness. I feel a very real, visceral sense that people want to beat me up and fight me almost daily. This almost always generates the infamous fight or flight response. In response, I feel like I need to address people in public by staring to ""preempt them"" and get to the feared event before it happens out of the blue. I feel like I need to get them to stop. 

The intrusive feeling blares out, ""PEOPLE WANT TO BEAT YOU UP!! THEY ARE THE PROBLEM!! BE AFRAID OF THEM WHEN IN PUBLIC!! STARE AT THEM!! STOP THEM TO STOP THIS AWFUL FEELING!!"" The last thing I want to do is make this post weird and simultaneously ensure no one responds, so I wouldn't get weird unless that is already what I'm feeling daily. 

I'm a fairly normal person. I graduated from a great university. I have an office job. I have friends, a great family, achievements. I go to the gym. I'm extroverted. But I am also 100% in the grips of this obsession and need help. 

The feelings have become too overwhelming to bear, so I need to stop this and get help. When this started a handful of years ago there were only a handful of obsessions. I didn't have to spend more than a few weeks to get out of the brain lock and thought loops those generated. Now it feels all consuming. Like it's everywhere and everything in my reality and feels to be more of who I am than it is OCD.

At times it feels so much like it's not OCD and more like I genuinely want to get into fights and people want to get into fights with me when I'm in public.

I typically obsess over these real events, going over and over them thousands of times, doing compulsions about how the person was only looking and the chances of us getting into a fight are slim. (Anything to reduce the anxiety.) Or I might feel terror because the people in these events obviously stared and turned in line or did something overt and undeniable to indicate their discontent and anger towards me. I then obsess and ruminate that, had I done something differently, the situation could have easily turned physical (given the side of town I was in or given another situational context). 

I think you get what I am getting at. Given these events do entail people actually looking and not made up hypotheticals, how do I know the terror I feel when stuck in an obsessive compulsive spiral is not warranted? Most stories and examples I hear of people with OCD in videos and elsewhere involve things that haven't happened or are less based in real events.

With my events however, it is easy to link the terror and fight or flight I feel to something that could easily happen. Because these events feel like they are just a couple steps away from turning violent. (My mind equates staring aggressively or an overt action such as turning towards me to face me as easily leading to violence.) 

I have many instances from the past two years of people behaving in odd ways towards me. Cocking their head as they pass me on the sidewalk, staring at me in a public place, doing so in an obviously intimidating way. How do I separate real life from OCD? Is this OCD or something else? 

The last four or so months has brought me too many episodes of feeling actual terror than I would like. I know feeling ""fight or flight"" this much isn't healthy or normal. 

How can this be OCD despite it being based on real events? How does this form of OCD function? I'm worried I don't belong on this sub even. I'm not seeking reassurance but rather information on how this could be OCD since I've never heard of anyone having this specific issue.

Thanks for your help!!!",5.031762506410555,6.597056097925313,5.6815403981537616,78.44378758916503,69.34854771784232,8.702037391020559,30.13683621614061,9.154245370990896,2.642766982143689,5038,200,917,99,89,1633,392,1205,0.08900000000000001,0.843,0.068,-0.9654,4,1,7,0,12,0,166.0,1,4,18,7,44,64,18,22,59,1,96,13,12,14,8,206,190,99,0,34,44,0,27,9,1,8,1,2,1,2,63,53,0,5,38,2,2,12,24,45,0,6,25,47,113,19,161,143,21,146,0,2,18,3,67,75,2,31,65,644,176,8,0.0,0.0,0.10442216414289857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03161804334446042,0.0,0.07143385951224647,0.0,0.039361164105820114,0.08557244970559293,0.029679115247126155,0.0,0.0,0.024255856985677064,0.03740161529496318,0.054572730922063085,0.0,0.03537364613614415,0.049880599828898815,0.0,0.02935220152408428,0.0,0.0,0.0405781581265927,0.033511804298961806,0.08228080715111677,0.0,0.08697293927324416,0.07878628678333775,0.03035133378668335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03961975058884337,0.0,0.03981793069783285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543537434445515,0.03946660446080067,0.0,0.0230032827979425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03726607359694517,0.0,0.0,0.031213814026780026,0.07300268078153463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029796521031914807,0.0,0.031591774178575574,0.0,0.0,0.07067628049541921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032056619064311516,0.0,0.03362516205024741,0.16054827223427925,0.378737212683512,0.07644492032843381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02755745581243188,0.0,0.1863536046720416,0.0,0.04054255108748797,0.029917111951122764,0.0285274211752878,0.07864946898470886,0.0,0.0,0.12616642716736567,0.0,0.06390408188571389,0.0,0.10981875794260412,0.0,0.04020108107505476,0.0,0.11953948389164774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03722872970003074,0.0353955611068289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058807554947959764,0.11629861068888453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025193772336221616,0.15683279498112732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981049267687945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03375047207195845,0.04761810717799803,0.14464936362749156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03783872587545554,0.07203019405196365,0.0,0.056940639243334916,0.0,0.052441019586924834,0.15868679714419004,0.02750980717944258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989526892482598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02416995237797705,0.0542551235430983,0.0,0.041849392469901,0.0,0.0,0.10214908449912127,0.32146532244242826,0.062288855117490674,0.11179822079083553,0.0,0.03371833645041419,0.0,0.034160639170421565,0.0,0.0,0.06826002630068571,0.0,0.0,0.0799139436901834,0.0,0.0,0.3653878678080973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032471334888181616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02950541730557423,0.08018595495791156,0.0,0.0,0.09066561422913318,0.19221590415659734,0.10583141062465946,0.0,0.07573921183496776,0.0,0.0,0.11928211738753801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247036415184432,0.0328388355052901,0.04079012886602867,0.0,0.09478647642438463,0.02285498531912062,0.0,0.02831686766815092,0.08319454148932975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19398585841204646,0.06968603806795437,0.0,0.04290490902477835,0.0,0.03928390077309213,0.0588606267164124,0.2103825215489725,0.05662411587113522,0.02861118274104335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05193430094089282,0.036223173574591684,0.0,0.05067587056842957,0.0,0.0,0.09187758226547342
mentalhealth,toby_1012,2020/01/05,"First diagnosis & reveal after 4 years of struggle I already posted this on another subreddit, but i didnt really get any advice so im trying it here.

I just got my first diagnosis after 4 years of silent strugge.

I dont know where else to talk about this but i really just want to type it out. Quick introduction: I am a german boy and because of the social healthcare, it takes a really long time to get an appointment to anything regarding mental health. On top of that, when i went to a psychiatrist 4 years ago with my parents, they denied treatment and that made me what i am today.

I have been self-medicating myself with xanax during my major panic attacks that appear once or twice a month. It usually worked out, i calmed down after a couple of minutes. Yesterday, i had my first panic attack that my parents actually noticed. Because they dont believe me, they always think im making shit up so i never told them again. My panic attack was uncontrollable and since my parents havent seen that before, they called an ambulance that gave me some other benzodiazepine. In the hospital, i was then asked to talk about all my issues, and i explained everything. About the panic i usually have during these attacks, how frequent they are, about my depression and all that stuff. Waking up tomorrow morning, i was driven to a psychiatric institution for a first examination and to check if i needed to be put under watch. After maybe an hour of me pouring my heart out, the psychiatrist decided that im not going to be forced into a clinic, so i went back home with my first diagnosis: ADHD, depression with suicidal tendencies, beginning of social anxiety and panic disorder. I dont know what i should do now except talk to my psychiatrist. Im feeling really lost.",6.585846640771109,7.457976317220548,7.704574881312041,67.89829808660626,65.28398791540786,10.776060998417497,32.076104157675154,10.712014347399686,3.747369328154223,1415,54,232,37,21,481,177,331,0.228,0.746,0.026000000000000002,-0.9976,3,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,6,9,17,16,5,7,15,0,19,6,3,3,3,42,43,17,1,4,8,3,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,19,15,0,0,8,0,1,6,7,15,0,6,15,3,43,1,43,25,4,51,0,3,2,0,20,13,1,4,31,175,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.06906124627843,0.0,0.0850517072221701,0.06915555982365737,0.06273327591446076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809638127393495,0.0,0.0588862538206764,0.07667919323339907,0.0,0.04812598149248781,0.07420844567715873,0.054138805318249085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05823762517011815,0.0,0.06616033445732049,0.32204406352705633,0.0,0.054417710390248834,0.0,0.08628138903282248,0.0,0.06022000084156046,0.07973348037360788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226401451836352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783055852025099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190807981381264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110847485555586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24882550450976704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05911919832678831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360345283663968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035783404707819856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009843458363245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394873852365537,0.0,0.0402201840249724,0.0,0.056601180668281514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522512981550743,0.0,0.08386271178123647,0.0,0.0,0.07098801339256379,0.0,0.06969412884684313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057746888621028,0.07386542382693305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778660916729434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06262916402792276,0.0,0.0,0.07725374221365927,0.0,0.0,0.06696422209517988,0.04723948005854526,0.0,0.07109791019050657,0.0,0.07860944202885008,0.0,0.07131944756575251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05648788562723853,0.0,0.0,0.05247500886743242,0.05458213543893908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057203819578923,0.0,0.07536766935275127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4151663428481613,0.23574490783395816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777803354703331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07114332981838313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18134812592481925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382847484845396,0.0,0.07264431960770174,0.05854162019567824,0.0,0.0,0.14428206959511522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739841001528003,0.08101464214448692,0.07741082067611238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053210182463455435,0.1706465751635957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04534651573550153,0.0,0.0,0.04126651726174552,0.0,0.06708162191872402,0.06762370410893707,0.0,0.048048139294270084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588616660091073,0.0,0.041741940284309234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13120887448559124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05152135435541557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13672055041057776
mentalhealth,Buggeto,2020/01/05,"I'm so close I can taste it It's been a little over a year since I went downhill fast with a bad boyfriend. We have since moved to a new city and live together. I'm a few weeks out from getting my tax returns so I can finally get away from him. No more late night panic attacks, no more shattered dishes, no more yelling, swearing, and running away to hide. I am so close to being free I can taste it...",1.8744873949579808,3.2759336588235293,3.0280672268907587,94.98058823529414,77.11764705882355,5.798319327731093,25.084033613445378,6.1826913282559595,0.5191680672268908,311,11,72,2,7,100,56,85,0.268,0.695,0.037000000000000005,-0.9561,0,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,1,0,0,0,3,4,1,1,5,0,7,3,0,0,0,7,12,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,7,3,0,0,0,2,3,3,3,0,0,2,3,8,2,10,9,4,18,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,8,45,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25537574183471473,0.4218082967870659,0.0,0.1874294674142171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459043011997709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23456062193965266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532205750020158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22498558501921656,0.1982178840243436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23858422446939964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21680192023694106,0.0,0.21065707485006974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26337616443781386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3713804756266571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006243640896516,0.0,0.0,0.20809303726998046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445562515172956
mentalhealth,digital_kid01,2020/01/05,"Compulsive eating problem So basically i eat a lot. O don't know if i'm lucky, but i'm still 66,5kg with 171 cm height, which is bad, i know, but not that bas as it could be. So i gained 6 kg since 2017. I've tried to exercise, to eat less,but every time I do it, i can't resist my cravings. i just can't. and when i eat, i eat a lot. till my stomach hurts. and then i wait until i get hungry again, to do the same shit. i fucking hate it. i hate being a prisoner of food, hate that i can't het back to my normal thin body, i fucking hate the way I look. ivve tried, really. I've tried doing everything, i just can't. i can't. and the weirdest thing is that it's not even a coping mechanism. i don't feel better after eating. it's just me overeating.
i can't do it anymore. i don't know what to do, o really can't resist my cravings. are there any pills for removing your appetite, or something
I wish i could throw up all my food, but my throwing up reflex is wery weak, in fact there's none of it.",0.07181426416720528,1.661248407239821,2.717000646412412,94.32708898944195,83.02714932126699,5.83848308554191,19.121094591682827,6.868970318607317,0.03553117862529609,762,19,186,9,21,266,115,221,0.226,0.723,0.052000000000000005,-0.9923,0,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,0,2,12,13,7,0,7,0,23,16,3,0,2,30,39,15,0,6,10,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,13,4,8,1,4,1,0,3,13,11,0,0,0,3,30,2,17,35,5,19,0,1,1,2,1,6,3,5,9,118,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045263263551947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274493693132493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966322639235393,0.08650299871765722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162718568172797,0.0,0.11507800919979627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16543487610222016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6360617334480977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842787192565443,0.0,0.08728880637035506,0.0,0.09311042721798464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052384075880544265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25055090340729363,0.0,0.0,0.19155599778062107,0.054127553844074965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4091404786340087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109076429223541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17081017040083296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699924137321886,0.0,0.0,0.1761567309437802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150755974998896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913272822091694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13273966056064276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634554150708722,0.0857003043600892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975756412296928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273636217551689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688282917223435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604109192296244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110160334318299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223411846746635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191367135520866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hippygrandad,2020/01/05,"I'm watching it happen again So a while back I was in a really bad place with my mental health. My mother helped me to find a fantastic psychologist and even paid for a few sessions. It took me a while, but I got back on track and have been pretty much fine since. Until a few days ago. 

I'm finding myself repeating the patterns of behaviour that got me into the dark space I was in before. I'm binging on food, TV shows, and am groggy. I'm even having difficulty sleeping. I can't seem to motivate myself to do regular tasks, and even a shower feels like an overwhelming amount of effort. I'm still getting things done, and I'm pushing through those feelings, but it feels like I'm headed towards an inevitable breakdown that will land me at a psychologist's office again. Like I'm watching a car crash in slow motion. I'm watching it all, recognising it for what it is, but am unable to get myself out of it.

Any advice on getting out of this before it starts?",4.647427884615382,5.531549239583335,5.657500000000002,80.80673076923081,69.625,8.199358974358978,28.31089743589744,8.384062270229773,1.9728008012820517,762,26,146,11,13,252,113,192,0.063,0.8390000000000001,0.098,0.7736,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,10,6,0,1,13,0,12,4,2,1,1,20,34,12,0,0,3,1,3,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,14,9,1,0,7,2,1,4,1,2,0,0,8,6,13,4,24,25,5,31,0,1,3,0,2,14,0,1,16,99,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14954780021932726,0.13565971322453754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407167093939924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353548695892475,0.1277810534687753,0.0,0.0,0.26044959155924946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869740241654013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15661188504855056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30324216585228336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321431337722356,0.2186619805711854,0.0,0.0,0.27974948621177104,0.0,0.18505519380568147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23986945959384226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24479830921309575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353317561559993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570620193757052,0.162673148967468,0.0,0.0,0.1025787201761894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243011662629236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422717310817474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250116904547476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15989303329397309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569553641029565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804061081679198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932082801450205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659532427852765,0.0,0.15314938020513505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832169093500003,0.0,0.12221702918610693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167221662966454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003180157078746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suckppwhileustillcan,2020/01/05,"I often see no point in living In school I have a very loud personality and make a lot of jokes that often get me sent to the principal’s office. 

I usually try to ignore all the people that hate me for this fact but recently I’ve just not wanted to live. My dad is single and says I’m the only reason he’s actually alive and he would end himself if something ever happened to me. I wish he hated me so I could stop having the troubles of life. 

Usually during the middle of the day something will happen and I’ll just get really quiet and daydream and fantasize about ending my self. I’ve even gone far enough to plan it a couple of times but then I realize my dad would die if I died. I wish I could just end it and be able to Rest In Peace. It doesn’t help that school me very hard and everyone is expecting me to go to Harvard when I grow up. I don’t care about my life but I care about my loved ones. It’s weird because I liven it when I get like That maybe because it makes me think about me dying. Please give me fast and painless ways to do it.",2.1393204365079366,3.4773479419642896,4.013333333333332,88.45388888888891,76.27678571428571,6.942063492063492,21.373015873015877,7.594959193182576,0.6570950396825395,825,20,182,11,18,280,126,224,0.131,0.698,0.171,0.9041,0,0,2,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,1,14,10,2,0,9,0,13,3,0,3,3,39,35,18,3,10,9,2,1,1,0,3,2,3,0,2,12,9,0,2,3,1,0,4,4,5,0,1,2,5,29,5,22,27,5,26,0,0,1,1,13,7,0,5,15,118,41,2,0.10730152381598096,0.0,0.10471080881350246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13082002596297038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218802109604159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17134307112520514,0.118727095194782,0.0,0.06920060602772217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3340861229854449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851119039640613,0.1108711576072337,0.0,0.07087164449568252,0.09706037141972723,0.0,0.10253120431195244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818185246032732,0.10293339906508046,0.06098192874920867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18977276628349526,0.0,0.096121089171936,0.2118760801303814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192194959480354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158047910856762,0.05242210452716699,0.0,0.18949842276911666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122391840954357,0.09684381457511416,0.0,0.14324920071430966,0.0,0.10779880297820403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271028952297184,0.08160764405389903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438936609217321,0.09369155178340198,0.0,0.11778485110709355,0.1014346229236463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874010376906424,0.11032383752638383,0.10594730981599457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533047850627908,0.0,0.21718974131345425,0.0855054221062162,0.0,0.1119388909328655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652119106233808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897088785543452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687544838156449,0.0,0.0,0.0625683814330952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285069121404257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23635493807640615,0.17706998934567705,0.06328921883328494,0.08517095513030425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467829137934044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244784777550954,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ggbrown74,2020/01/05,Back when I used to work I'd be so stressed out by the end of the day that if I sneezed my whole back would pop. Does anybody else do that? This happened to me for years but I don't remember it happening before I got diagnosed and medicated. It was also after I gained a bunch of weight from the meds.,1.2714583333333316,3.107339062500003,2.9512500000000017,92.90208333333337,80.25,6.766666666666668,23.166666666666664,7.793537801064563,0.928935416666667,236,8,55,4,6,78,51,64,0.035,0.9079999999999999,0.057,0.3274,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,1,4,0,5,3,0,1,0,7,9,6,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,7,0,9,5,2,8,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,7,40,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17467864271979022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3359188562322181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18586810856181354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408694818625066,0.0,0.0,0.22170217019236205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911498392437463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824704984910481,0.0,0.19346442413216386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469867562536484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3863144095481052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24262683661269915,0.2200455607292744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24743896465227685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25021118601575976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18865365871733988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659892762681608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438696443295725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901986965724366,0.0,0.0,0.15516662757683944,0.0,0.0,0.140661960318928
mentalhealth,Casthecat6,2020/01/05,"How do you know if you need immediate help? Trigger warning : suicide




This might seem like a bit of a stupid question but I don't actually feel like I'm sick enough for immediate attention in comparison to others I know. 
Around this time last year I tried to kill myself, I was sectioned because of this and since have been to multiple different therapies and I'm still currently in therapy. My gp tried to get me in contact with a crisis team but my psychologist said she thought it wasn't necessary because I don't harm myself in crisis therefore ""I'm coping fine"". I agreed because I thought if I'm not harming myself surely I don't need that kind of help? but for the past few days I've been edging closer and closer to wanting to try to end my life again. It started as a crisis but it's a little different from before because before it was an impulsive decision but I've been so calm and collected since the crisis and the thought of it is actually making me feel relief and the more relieved I feel the more I'm actually making plans. I have told two people, one who asked me to go to a&e but I didn't think it was necessary. I don't think how I feel warrants immediate intervention because I feel calm. I also feel like I'd be just wasting their time because I'm convinced they'll just tell me to distract myself and I'll go home feeling the exact same way so it seems pointless anyway. I don't really go to them when I'm in crisis so I'm not sure I'd even be taken seriously because I'm not frantic. 
I don't know what to do, some advice would be helpful because I'm worried that perhaps my perceptions are a bit distorted because of how awful the past few months have been. 
I know this sounds really stupid, it's not making much sense to me either but I'm just so done and tired I don't know what to do anymore.",3.5145571149735133,5.0413285902965015,5.14324565480063,80.97398921832888,73.07008086253369,7.920475880658053,28.696068407844592,8.53829466247534,2.188319565015336,1461,59,283,26,29,495,166,371,0.193,0.6809999999999999,0.126,-0.987,3,0,0,0,0,3,22.0,0,2,3,2,17,20,3,2,14,1,31,3,0,8,3,68,76,27,2,6,17,0,7,3,0,3,3,2,1,0,18,10,0,0,23,1,0,3,13,8,0,2,16,9,38,12,30,54,12,28,0,0,0,0,17,10,0,7,17,179,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.2385436963182444,0.0,0.0,0.0796231545681654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516103365388005,0.0,0.08828558789132313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080813466020532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253615243206528,0.07617456282921534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4470354049299197,0.0,0.13867016469331894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17791422865975606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052549074721013285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17026245368594173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338425782354572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216876462640512,0.08419256824389316,0.0,0.053818016286053316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28839782367518296,0.11642134923861334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04257092164826657,0.0,0.13892409825962718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384676899321746,0.0,0.08173297385280533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901476327336916,0.08485084401183744,0.22390156412782666,0.06641861116869427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05755306477902896,0.11942379897918687,0.08166625440059291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16316937200765438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643940305577172,0.0,0.0,0.06503806288309205,0.0,0.059898560586446326,0.12083556991431064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05521423375394282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555673573833715,0.056489279236375714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127835872630116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439876343983702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750793139208098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483560949381297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480531385754904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05767329728523739,0.0,0.06507153827388575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912795667708695,0.0,0.15359142382181046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121875857563749,0.0,0.18636327245017592,0.0,0.0,0.10442060307927477,0.0,0.1940625442067516,0.095025484308141,0.09365143984642588,0.0,0.07785943253829071,0.0,0.16596255303966162,0.0,0.07959596144624734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04806012664358055,0.06467652730395819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274880900797811,0.0,0.05788239297068915,0.0,0.0,0.05247166217604222
mentalhealth,ArtsyCats,2020/01/05,"I can’t remember anything? People around me always talk about their lives in such detail. Like the one time they went to the park or broke up with someone or learned an important lesson. I can’t remember these sorts of things.

I just found all my tae kwon do certificates, my first belt, my boards broken. For the life of me I can’t remember being present for any of it. I know that I *did* those things, but can’t recall any memories from it. I remember the square room with the mats and mirrors that we practiced in, but no specifics, no faces or people, I don’t remember myself being in that room, I just remember the place itself. I don’t remember anything I was taught.

I’m only 17? The certificates say 2013. So I was 11-12. Should I be forgetting things so easily like this after only a few years? This happens with lots of things. I was in a school shooting a couple years ago and I remember being present, yet I can’t remember anything else other than a course of events. If you asked me for an interview I’d literally tell you nothing more than what a news article would tell you.

I forget what I’m doing a lot. I forget about plans or events. I forget about people. I’m terrible with time and tasks unless I constantly check my phone’s clock or my to-do list. I just kind of brush off not remembering names or faces but I don’t think most people normally live like this, because my friends remember my name just fine. I feel like I’m spectating someone else’s life. The hell is wrong with me?",2.407647330181064,4.652280167224081,3.585549532925848,87.71983277591974,78.4314381270903,7.334840272171607,23.35382308845577,8.326086129247049,1.4690568792526821,1186,39,240,24,29,384,152,299,0.111,0.805,0.085,-0.8217,0,0,0,1,0,0,36.0,1,3,2,3,12,11,1,0,16,0,21,4,2,0,1,58,33,16,0,4,16,0,1,4,1,2,2,1,2,0,18,10,0,0,17,0,1,1,11,4,0,2,7,4,41,7,30,20,6,25,1,1,1,0,16,10,1,11,18,158,59,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059239025001297727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055606282494673684,0.0,0.0,0.09089071722423166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16498134761077812,0.059491123680533164,0.062475195976621864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04073775271222421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722173697957951,0.0,0.0,0.07394395481399446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111652503928302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03379026481908085,0.047741964898783185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05684389641092294,0.0,0.07327349615797972,0.05163117768104473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05909581478419861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959111954874506,0.03672694290276435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440524152889544,0.13059521828785353,0.0,0.11802076676410267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11362961908171518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547728994804525,0.06412330643316592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04528440920902257,0.1016514711237248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853205931110188,0.0,0.06982107784023947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8327345576805547,0.0,0.0,0.0531443394329935,0.0,0.0676335439328218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324636230784013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053713846891964234,0.11682130448717674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17759032035968209,0.0428207094276404,0.0,0.0,0.07793593470611411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06195026230291587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04747272199706951,0.0730659705463882,0.0,0.08607013301847401
mentalhealth,fiercely_fearless,2020/01/05,"What the &@$%! Probably a very stupid question, but for the first time in my 36 years, I'm realizing that I do actually exsist to people other than when I  am with them. Honestly, never did I ever think, acknowledge, accept at all the fact that I could be in someone's thoughts for some reason, good thoughts bad ones, it doesn't even matter. I just assumed I wasn't, as far back as I can remember. Does anyone know if this is common and what it's called? Please no mean jokes, I know it probably sounds ridiculous, but it is very real on this side of things.",4.1777702702702735,5.3742969009009025,5.0230518018018016,83.76268581081084,70.98198198198199,8.072522522522524,26.487612612612608,8.472884824447931,1.7085936936936932,440,14,88,7,8,143,83,111,0.121,0.736,0.14400000000000002,0.5768,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,1,5,7,2,0,4,0,10,0,0,1,4,27,17,7,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,12,2,0,0,13,1,0,0,4,3,0,2,4,1,10,4,12,11,2,14,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,4,8,63,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.17449731845879074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937456145356399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503137123284944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137497439612979,0.14930277596269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825897653755493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427689595115929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648191812298076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181053996181778,0.1617481015882733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15209966247862486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998125697792458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19654372666504136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19478159121492986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791289302035348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211694445863626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396757366331845,0.0,0.0,0.19628480484629232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3855849045887213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20031334816506216,0.0,0.0,0.2035302359839863,0.0,0.1838512568910159,0.0,0.0,0.20256215731250996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150908515698347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879651770751976,0.11457721694440096,0.0,0.2839177400201854,0.10426826899816696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950816507909827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515078142219565
mentalhealth,666cookie666,2020/01/05,"Daydreaming about death and suicide, knowing I’ll never do it. Don’t worry, this isn’t a cry for help. More one of curiosity.

I’ve found myself fantasizing about suicide a lot lately. Maybe not fantasizing, more day dreaming. Pondering. Lazy thoughts dancing across my minds eye, you know?

Naturally I quickly snap out if it and realize that’s not the way at all, but those thoughts keep popping up again.

Yes, I am in a depression and yes, I am trying to fight it. But still I often wonder - lazily - about not being around anymore. Sure, one or two folk might be pissed at my passing, but what should I care? Those that would mourn are the ones that jettisoned me into this dark place.

I’ve asked for help a bunch of times. I’ve made it clear what it is I believe that is not allowing me to progress, but still those metaphorical heels dig in deeper and deeper.

My question is if anyone feels the same? Knowing that I’d never do it, but daydreaming about ending the misery once and for all. In the same way you daydream about being Bruce Lee and beating a bunch of bad guys, but knowing it would never actually occur.

Anyone?",3.659383108935128,5.842310032558143,4.245483476132193,84.779241126071,74.25581395348838,6.944920440636476,25.734394124847,7.85451343220497,1.5171395348837209,887,31,167,13,19,281,123,215,0.187,0.705,0.10800000000000001,-0.9664,0,0,0,0,1,2,32.0,0,2,0,2,11,7,2,0,10,2,17,3,3,2,7,53,30,15,4,5,13,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,19,9,0,1,12,2,0,2,9,5,0,4,4,2,14,2,23,19,9,26,0,2,1,0,8,11,1,8,11,123,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.1261613712281039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821380609675384,0.18079509049867265,0.0,0.0,0.11508910856606283,0.12086197347777253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794574443883917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14565745275096942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181243888788965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420110938104813,0.083376715787028,0.0,0.11135109299279633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450619461717275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536927218121688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175192587764446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801030562186044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17331108192354872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149124998358385,0.0,0.0,0.2842018007078904,0.0,0.1458366384588581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991162006824848,0.0,0.1223305187498456,0.0,0.0,0.12988195731255495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714862877498954,0.13053878157973642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991326144233833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768197106485236,0.26281612946803085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350730177985239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482633259355795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20649083475934016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28282881675830696,0.0,0.1218475164339594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20527221686440994,0.07538584494349196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777454020862857,0.0,0.12629051777852188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052373505620537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020169031768606,0.0,0.1312929669457026,0.0,0.18367759483538088,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,friendlykeywarrior,2020/01/05,"""mood swings"" linked to alcohol? Recently I've been experiencing mood swings. Feeling quite happy and contented in the day till about 5pm I started feeling like I want to cry but I cant.  This feeling lasts thru the night till I fall asleep 

My meds have been the same for the past 2 months 
Morning (vortioxetine 10mg aka brintellix)
Night Lyrica 20mg lithium carbonate 200mg 

Recently I started drinking ciders and 2-3 alcohol shots for bout a total of 4 times in the past 2 weeks. Laid off bout 4 days ago. Wonder if alcohol exercebates bipolar symptoms(I'm bipolar suspected) 

Or is it cuz of life factors such as having to take a gap year cuz I couldn't keep up with the rigour of my studies 


🤷",2.18697222222222,4.908830637037038,3.5213657407407415,84.84427083333334,83.37037037037038,7.226851851851853,26.95601851851852,8.278499904357787,2.2576018518518524,556,25,105,13,16,181,95,135,0.017,0.887,0.096,0.6628,0,0,4,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,8,0,7,8,1,2,1,19,16,10,0,3,3,0,3,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,3,4,1,6,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,4,8,2,18,13,2,23,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,19,53,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391320987810106,0.5032149630284735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17240888880765018,0.2024473797864911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15375720907085402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380851370802545,0.11212945817645596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670826706088238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395097796602138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794015757220406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086272427302528,0.07668081476170159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17434282673825688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252808492535255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29458530574000324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996646853420077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16694211604405562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099503963748986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22218864901106894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801144216915582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152235511880824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925767652699423,0.0,0.12590070359511432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17021217841533515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107457245421166
mentalhealth,nohal_o,2020/01/05,"trouble breathing i’m not diagnosed with any mental condition, i go to a therapist once a week, but she’s out of town for like 3 weeks so i’m losing my marbles a bit lmao

i have trouble breathing. it happens randomly. it feels like there is a fat cat on my chest and it’s choking me. it passes after some time but it’s really distracting. my friend has had the same issue for a while and she’s taking pills. but it doesn’t help a 100%. she had this thing happen to her more frequently than i do and i’m not planning on taking any pills because i have a bad history with being addicted to A LOT of things...

it just feels like it’s too much effort to breathe... does anyone have any tips?",0.7588898601398597,3.0101285734265737,2.8312893356643367,90.68231861888115,84.94405594405596,6.092482517482518,21.524912587412587,7.413659706084162,0.8629164335664337,538,18,114,9,16,181,88,143,0.138,0.71,0.152,0.4834,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,4,9,0,1,9,0,10,9,5,0,0,18,20,8,0,0,6,0,2,3,1,0,5,0,0,0,11,6,1,0,2,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,2,2,12,4,15,17,6,12,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,3,9,75,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18679893308473106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34957563395996777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981327724809746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307173242956908,0.1044545667250569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870719647430585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17391863636646546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499512582763466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732814029352635,0.24482775440918514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13238610220537864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973832698574745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030519514492213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485360941715572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17884693161047474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511417426297172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916990174013877,0.0,0.14567731205202486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17268247713808035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259634094315951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18248424916581235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977245575330298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25767070358439004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989528369689764,0.22767726166407176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991670809073212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748964192016441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Eldersh,2020/01/05,"I just finished sobbing in my kitchen for a really long time. It's the first time I've cried in months. A week ago I thought I was pregnant. Late period, got a positive test, then the next one was negative, then my period started. I drank a lot over the holidays, so I blame myself. I didn't drink anything after I got that positive and I never would have had anything over the holidays if I'd thought I could be pregnant. My husband and I sleep in separate bedrooms and we only had sex once last month and not even in my window for pregnancy. Still I am experiencing enormous amount of guilt and pain over this loss, even though it was so early. We have one healthy, beautiful child, but I would love another. I love being a mom. But my husband has no interest in more babies, hence separate bedrooms and very infrequent sex. 
I have been on an antidepressant for about 1 year and it helps me a lot, but I stopped taking my antidepressant med about 3 weeks ago because I've been feeling good and exercising, so thought I don't need it anymore. Obviously I do.  I'm going to start taking it again today. I have a lot of things I'm hoping to accomplish this year, including a career change, losing weight, and starting a degree program. I think it's part of why I cried so much. All the stress and fear of failure welling up. 
It would also be nice to have a better relationship with my husband, but I'm losing hope. He drinks a lot and has a whole host of his own issues....but I can't do anything about that. I just have to work on myself. 
Anyways it felt weirdly good to cry and I do feel a bit better now. I think the antidepressant might suppress my ability to cry somehow because I've noticed I don't ever cry while taking them. I am not sure if that's a good thing or not.",3.905232936078004,5.1375702676056365,5.124859154929581,82.63888136511379,71.67605633802819,8.278439869989166,29.146803900325022,8.730908602173464,2.2008808234019512,1395,55,280,25,26,463,180,355,0.151,0.659,0.19,0.9581,0,0,2,0,0,0,41.0,2,0,1,8,20,22,0,3,21,0,32,12,1,0,5,55,58,28,0,9,12,4,4,0,0,4,2,0,4,1,15,15,5,2,8,5,0,1,10,9,1,3,15,5,41,13,30,35,12,46,0,4,0,4,14,12,1,11,33,197,56,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425077892320658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642815480065264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428765580662123,0.0,0.0,0.07971745836736784,0.0,0.0,0.1984428939539763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800038196399227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218289636567574,0.08775645036099901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503361896162615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417857775806671,0.0,0.4414798921887724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15748774104003194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618325718661943,0.0727102246210581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904522264861447,0.08128722471086877,0.0,0.077179435617475,0.0,0.0,0.06837298561784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045683008135276135,0.20226211207546235,0.12857784018739896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387843703593855,0.0,0.0,0.15967515386145612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06552215185912727,0.09067452647032248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113564194576315,0.0,0.1798540505836152,0.0,0.273351997374404,0.14509599351245586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928640847301395,0.0,0.0,0.08527272091323265,0.0,0.09414256112124074,0.12832047397154875,0.0,0.05909010311763532,0.05960231945983115,0.06199564218178659,0.0,0.08548729079518644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915155702442499,0.0,0.08560432866345895,0.10893800232054184,0.0611342203121669,0.08553223729774698,0.0,0.0,0.08704599693484638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05149484091617284,0.0,0.0,0.08630030891668769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044016560454914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17068462332080733,0.0,0.06419326055553191,0.06720304708069487,0.09207744069458433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575919172979963,0.0,0.18131203951093045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068046104021724,0.10301122669976473,0.0789750194748718,0.19144326067565595,0.09374291488136112,0.0,0.07619284580940429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632366284328772,0.0,0.0,0.12895536751976408,0.09788376051834212,0.07227317453171556,0.0,0.07253235579081138,0.08974376034311768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851913677713485,0.0,0.0,0.1713034438146804,0.0,0.0,0.10352689274598847
mentalhealth,angryturtle3003,2020/01/05,When should I see a doctor Should I go see a doctor or psychiatrist if I’m having suicidal ideologies basically everyday. And know how I’m going to do it,2.576666666666668,4.855314838709682,6.330322580645162,68.08215053763442,78.03225806451613,10.58494623655914,26.46236559139785,10.504223727775694,3.7449913978494624,124,5,22,5,3,47,23,31,0.158,0.8420000000000001,0.0,-0.6705,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,1,0,7,11,5,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,9,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,15,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6634276305690858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3683689321152912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17810814921952234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5165061466138491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3544954111711997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chadbambi,2020/01/05,"Advice with ECT??? hey y’all! 

preface:
okay so i’ve had 3 rounds of ect at this point over the course of two years. first round was 10 times in dec ‘17, second round was maybe 13(?) summer of ‘18, two times in dec ‘18, and this last round i had 18 sessions this past fall in ‘19. i didn’t have memory loss the first time but i had pretty bad memory loss for the second one and the third round. first round worked and for the first time in my life i didn’t want to kill myself—this lasted 6 months but just living without suicidal thoughts was nearly euphoric. the second round last summer didn’t take and i ended up in the hospital dec 2018. the third round i just finished and has worked pretty well tbh.

so my issue is that i’m a student. i have one last semester in undergrad left. my doctor said that a great way to keep the benefits of ect is to do booster rounds. it would mean going and doing 2-3 times a month for a few months and then hopefully 1 time a month after that period ends. theoretically i could start next month i’m p sure. but i’ve never done ect during the school sessions, it’s always been when i’m not in school (winter break, summer break, winter break, a term off) and i’m really concerned about how this will work with my studies, especially in regards to the memory loss aspect. and tbh school is a huge stressor already. 

does anyone have any experience with this at all or advice?",1.7900170586085054,4.063382155477033,3.0596783233824816,90.5073851590106,80.80212014134275,5.882246862434507,17.885829170220546,7.0983637204850245,0.12194173266723453,1102,23,229,14,29,356,148,283,0.075,0.7759999999999999,0.149,0.9721,0,0,0,0,0,1,33.0,0,1,0,10,8,11,1,0,18,1,23,2,0,1,3,31,36,18,2,4,8,0,9,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,10,12,0,1,2,0,0,2,6,5,1,13,13,10,13,6,31,20,3,60,0,3,9,0,3,17,0,2,37,133,23,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18494016957241005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442513973296093,0.0,0.0787386711556514,0.0,0.0,0.0643507709340719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616659752609387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901102410733545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555332865725523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685649922908963,0.08281022590140301,0.09683802949777694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16762590781821413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925650407762492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3219645454366992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377967926786532,0.0,0.0,0.1043284919949432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398766535127877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876779280599332,0.0,0.08411034952756173,0.10469265237442606,0.0,0.0,0.30854012953697807,0.0,0.0,0.1028143753713589,0.0,0.06683905967662518,0.0,0.0,0.08355888873407998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506726285207644,0.10307841163645766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3776586862042375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298349843050833,0.0,0.10063871159337506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824573214469856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033381561698198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945472206897596,0.0,0.0,0.19254284491752816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062157772581154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001357741099393,0.0,0.0,0.2873079337030589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697869129639017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350845498963172,0.0,0.08918644369382465,0.0,0.07114901674473853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751246293198221,0.3310725870563729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18487700828966505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05581446765919113,0.07511186910277823,0.0,0.0,0.08508257894218507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121870411055943,0.0,0.20667249391200568,0.0,0.0,0.0672215238727559,0.0,0.0,0.06093778972469475
mentalhealth,SiiiiilverSurrrfffer,2020/01/05,"Can’t seem to complete anything. I’m a 26 year old man and I’m starting to really reflect on my life. It seems that no matter what the task is I cannot finish it. I will start out strong but i either get bored and distracted or unmotivated in a short amount of time. This happened with college, jobs, relationships and even my hobbies. I will discover a new hobby that I love and will go all in on it,but in just a month I will drop it. I feel like I’m all over the place since things change so frequently for me. I can see this in my father too, he has a multitude of projects started at his house but none finished. What is this called even? Does anyone have advice on how I can overcome this? Thanks in advance.",1.7308163265306111,3.7407932040816365,3.1145238095238104,91.43464285714286,79.54421768707482,6.104761904761905,22.744897959183675,7.1686216300943375,0.6763142857142856,559,18,122,7,14,182,98,147,0.08900000000000001,0.794,0.11699999999999999,0.7246,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,6,6,0,1,7,0,12,2,0,1,2,19,27,9,0,0,5,1,1,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,12,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,0,2,14,4,17,23,5,27,0,0,1,1,7,13,0,3,12,80,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17718017287702054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678056060468204,0.0,0.1492078514280032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18514419690622108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918085853054682,0.0,0.19010667261527456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586711007686301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23951538924014626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167896042526184,0.129532388515292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947302741028257,0.0,0.10304622183468157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16033738989342794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20921464612569515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799284329151627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280690525570779,0.08858197703721221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16364502410320167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14472492690989214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751163955844923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902609379028211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18943692410927251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615585349976225,0.0,0.0,0.19466583178360114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14448560213077175,0.3301270678241497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998670263418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3850097941537111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16693167240356852,0.0,0.0,0.120458481454184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057269824886502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676174130399053
mentalhealth,mayday_42,2020/01/05,"someone PLEASE tell me what to do, im scared and confused [ TRIGGER WARNING: mention of self-harm ]

i [18] feel like im losing my mind... about 2 weeks or so ago, i started hardcore dissociating but this time i got this weird feeling like im living inside of a dream. i remember not being able to feel any emotions, i started experiencing my thoughts in 3rd person (i felt like they werent my own, like i was inside of someone elses head) and i was just.. doing everything on autopilot. i felt so detached. and then i woke up one day and realized that i have a memory gap. went to sleep on monday, woke up and it was thursday. i checked my school's online attendance report and i was present every single day. i found random text messages on my phone but i dont remember sending them. i also found a text file on my pc (sometimes i keep a diary in digital form) that says a bunch of stuff about me ""not feeling like myself"" and ""pushing the stress away"" etc. I don't remember that either. i tried not to freak out about it because i already have a lot on my plate, but soon after that i got into a serious talk with my best friend and i mentioned what had happened and he basically said something along the lines of ""I don't want to sound rude or offend you but that lowkey sounds like bullshit""... that just made me really sad. i grew up being called a liar whenever i confided in someone (in my childhood those were just different family members) and my friend treating me like this really hits.. we've been through a lot of similar stuff like depression and self harm and i thought he would understand... but now im just.. panicking and questioning everything. the ""im in a dream"" feelings returned yesterday and now im scared that this whole shitshow will happen again and that no one will believe me. if anyone knows what to do, please let me know, any help is appreciated",3.462121588089332,5.424952291208793,4.5497943991492384,83.35649592343142,74.16483516483518,7.663807160581354,28.225451967387446,8.460557738077197,2.1281142502658623,1470,60,282,27,31,480,195,364,0.142,0.698,0.16,0.8396,2,0,1,0,0,0,55.0,0,1,2,2,15,26,3,4,13,0,22,2,2,2,0,64,50,27,0,3,16,0,7,8,2,3,0,4,0,2,20,19,0,1,19,2,1,5,7,14,0,2,20,12,46,12,35,23,10,40,0,3,0,0,21,16,0,8,27,187,66,3,0.07462421095845098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614986044742632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234967244120846,0.059676954542488427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014940448499566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521789834014772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011190267427399,0.0,0.0,0.04549022636338733,0.0,0.0,0.08407593135887816,0.07831350545294588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619966287554629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625288512251846,0.0,0.06427372355058636,0.0,0.0,0.07796641749791716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745901947118186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06233895268618195,0.08394219318405853,0.0,0.0,0.08322572123797481,0.0,0.0,0.0628741162483223,0.0,0.1341348580251117,0.0,0.07034906470692995,0.0,0.18866121633625899,0.15993465365801934,0.1433018903182402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636431911308198,0.11530896054628048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936759710976018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197988660063376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658596952875346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05001903559459374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4836417204841224,0.0,0.0,0.06632942747524984,0.0,0.0,0.08202302950209713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07630831164999471,0.0,0.2916609604784495,0.0,0.0658945454552351,0.0,0.0,0.08348540392859785,0.0,0.12688567113967536,0.0,0.07061123274682232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534918009676964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113459327041144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515898261892086,0.0,0.16382994880481672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359619482644699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095612360804227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536040516861888,0.0,0.07098471339384753,0.0593441677506705,0.14942370693653442,0.0755236854864345,0.0,0.0,0.15569865393067395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746781036711428,0.0,0.18968655534113354,0.0574493634049013,0.07380525277404143,0.0,0.10563880121019507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548178152401519,0.0,0.1708537357227556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05998011405353178,0.06522484957292725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848657579151588,0.04351397752188056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0506649407789306,0.0,0.0,0.0776864353718968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044015293069931405,0.0,0.05985904076785398,0.0,0.0,0.0691773911864614,0.0,0.08331526655089982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053010898391673736,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,onehandhi,2020/01/05,"I shaved my head. I hate it but it’s forcing me to cope with my horrible self-image Hello. I shaved my head.

I look like a kiwi fruit.

But more importantly, I am learning that all my mirror-checking, selfie taking and nitpicking over facial appearance is driving me to deep depressions.

I am a man who struggles with some BDD and just want to know how other people perceive themselves. I’ve never brought this up to counselors before because I didn’t realize how much it hurt to hate your reflection.

Please, I am looking for people’s feedback on how they feel about their reflections, if it doesn’t hurt too much to detail.

Maybe then I will see how common this feeling is, and feel reassured. Thank you",3.4777267508610805,5.989058850746268,4.192686567164181,83.3622445464983,76.16417910447761,6.809644087256029,26.7256027554535,7.882392219407189,1.8615804822043631,562,22,99,9,13,179,92,134,0.192,0.677,0.131,-0.9205,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,2,0,7,9,2,1,2,0,8,4,3,4,2,27,22,11,0,2,4,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,9,5,1,0,9,0,0,3,3,6,0,0,2,7,19,3,13,19,5,10,0,3,3,0,8,4,0,3,4,70,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832787832741203,0.0,0.1512146477280191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15305784694976796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695603551204753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35089560730326896,0.364755080461636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3804757216665061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766252523091724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681813535938666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29845642981600395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785294801297316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612685939625563,0.0,0.13705775933742625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463978168347789,0.0,0.0,0.195067734096815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416086091418152,0.0,0.1853860289022307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18577680979305486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361273471125604,0.0,0.0,0.1636077339345632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481555475535044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrsSlibby,2020/01/05,"Does my husband think I'm a failure or am I just projecting? I've struggled with chronic depression and anxiety for years now and it often prevents me from doing the things in life I know I should do and many things I  want to do as well. Simple things like cleaning and bathing seem like insurmountable tasks sometimes. There are some days when I can get on top of it and be somewhat productive but a lot of the time I'm not.  This leads to the house being in a state of utter chaos most of the time. 

I will often have bursts of energy and motivation to clean and organize and I convince myself that I will ""get my life on track"" and ""stick with it this time"" but it never lasts long. I always fall back into my usual habits and struggles and everything falls apart all over again.

When we first got married my husband was so supportive and understand. He tried to be there for me as much as he could when I would fall apart and would encourage me whenever I  was ready to try something again.

But lately, it feels like he's just accepted my failures as the status quo. When I start doing better he appreciates it but he doesn't encourage me. And when I  break down, he seems disconnected like he's there but he's not really there.

I understand how hard all of this is on him and I wouldn't blame him if he had given up hope in me. But I feel like he will never admit that to me no matter how much I ask. 

On the other hand, I have a lot of self loathing all on my own. So maybe my husband does still believe in me and I'm just projecting?

I know neither is good but I've hated myself for a long time.  I am working on it but that's something I can live with. I'm not sure I can handle having him not believe in me anymore. I know I shouldn't rely on what others think of me but he is my rock. He has kept me going when nothing else could. If he doesn't even believe in me any more I don't know what to do.",2.5032575757575763,3.9616826969696985,3.8372601010100977,89.59255681818182,75.56565656565657,6.970202020202023,23.233585858585855,7.645422480735847,0.8877616161616158,1492,43,326,20,32,490,179,396,0.1,0.737,0.163,0.9747,0,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,1,0,0,6,26,19,1,2,11,0,37,4,1,4,6,83,66,42,0,11,19,3,4,5,0,8,3,0,3,1,20,21,0,2,15,2,0,5,13,4,1,1,6,4,50,15,43,47,13,53,0,1,0,0,25,20,0,13,31,236,70,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190852278963942,0.0,0.0,0.06694139626975383,0.0,0.07530500382513079,0.0,0.09762430842595826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202649024286932,0.0,0.0,0.07569295009380675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33271864843875265,0.0,0.08706064651316546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15718989033793812,0.0,0.0,0.06348453778366048,0.0,0.08478473400667212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17228797936027712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223253967218205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06501754610319282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884699658775104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995466897563866,0.1406486333737098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08373153851944637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028598618800767,0.0,0.05594473490952837,0.0825653468994839,0.07873007358910274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818135082368772,0.09718740764425228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977714090977223,0.0,0.11358454204629086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216396385788459,0.08024032492794993,0.11104265138162056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13905971646228327,0.2404598215672213,0.0,0.08692279208805392,0.17422953495051366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16737738662936552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998009509257228,0.09889446890048324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447269034869051,0.0,0.15184331807290966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944541708363816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306207366495724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17922900002594766,0.10269257971587252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15156517239284056,0.09735796183983826,0.0,0.06967511112329505,0.0,0.0786129261480125,0.0,0.0,0.2058180971026152,0.0,0.0,0.1117065773731199,0.09277690045570716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19619402902622168,0.12615053179857405,0.0,0.0,0.22960057740306816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13366624150924078,0.0,0.0,0.204955412416672,0.0,0.0,0.10841584241802224,0.0,0.058061439558931664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850782282712005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166422982560129,0.0,0.0,0.1398554392466586,0.0,0.0,0.06339101568717759
mentalhealth,sweetbutpsycho-,2020/01/05,"Journaling I want to journal (about my suicidal thoughts and depression) but I don’t want to because I’m so god damn paranoid. 😐 

Do you guys feel the same way?",-0.2177083333333308,1.8034943125000042,1.6087500000000006,93.02791666666668,105.875,5.883333333333333,27.20833333333333,7.1686216300943375,2.011108333333334,126,7,26,3,6,41,27,32,0.261,0.57,0.16899999999999998,-0.6599,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,7,3,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,3,6,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24485955715805724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3459652049162517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20310077824619105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3977249834334721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4393712127834202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31888795458749186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4738409118122041,0.3188337902002589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MisoooSuppe,2020/01/05,How to tell myself that mistakes are part of being human? That they are okay? I just want to be kinder to myself more.,0.625,3.0402148333333368,1.788333333333334,96.49000000000002,88.16666666666666,3.2,12.166666666666668,3.1291,-1.5857333333333334,92,1,19,0,3,29,19,24,0.08800000000000001,0.672,0.239,0.504,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,4,5,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,4,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,18,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7164590345776313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5782762031724007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39023465327492507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kinky_Britt,2020/01/05,"I (31f) thought I have somewhat of a hoarder problem....now I'm not so sure? I have about 20 8oz lotions and 8oz hand soap, all from bath and body. I thought it was a hoarder thing, and maybe it still is. But, I've used up nearly 1/6 of a hand soap container that's only been in the bathroom for about a week, maybe a few days longer. Which tells me I'm washing my hands, a lot, and having to put lotion on because I'm drying my hands out. When is handwashing deemed as OCD?",1.7070588235294115,2.8039771078431386,3.1491666666666696,95.19375,76.94117647058823,5.8843137254901965,24.514705882352942,5.985473137389443,0.37297647058823546,363,12,87,2,8,119,71,102,0.027000000000000003,0.898,0.075,0.647,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,7,0,7,6,5,1,2,15,13,8,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,5,5,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,4,7,1,13,9,4,10,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,4,52,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274340239169104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783236053613212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16159507589813735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21302322140372892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5034567397289201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905676003686303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397589124073797,0.0,0.2518891820297485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001032410561606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361565633796364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190067238767043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16646567346993466,0.0,0.0,0.3978446398478083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21640955795269207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200989845109756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Atvali,2020/01/05,"I don't know how to cope Last Monday I went to hang out with a friend I hadn't seen in a couple of weeks. Then he broke the news to me. He found a lump. He's being tested for cancer. 

I had a really shitty 2019 with the loss of my job, my relationship, and my decline in mental health and this news is how 2019 ends?! 

This is a new friend of mine, we've only known each other for a few months and we've already seen eachother at our worst and supported eachother. I'm proud to say he's one of my best friends and I'll give up anything to help him. I hate seeing him like this. 

My world collapsed when he told me about the lump, I was so close to crying that I had to save it until I got home. We left the shop at 5:30 and when I got home I had a full mental breakdown. 

Everything got on top of me. My debt, jobless, sickness, the love of my life leaving me, I have no money to survive, and now one of my best friends might have cancer. 

I can't cope like this anymore. I'm waiting to hear back from him about the test results. 

I just don't know how to cope. I'm close to having another breakdown. I've been thinking about self harm although I've never done it before. Tattoos are usually my way of expressing pain and to get the self harm urges out but I can't afford to get one. 

I just don't know what to do.",1.3642553191489348,2.8027220390070937,2.9683865248226984,94.70875,78.60992907801419,5.69290780141844,20.96985815602837,6.21433560688645,0.005947517730496621,1013,26,238,7,24,334,144,282,0.11,0.7859999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.396,4,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,2,0,0,6,13,19,1,0,14,0,21,9,0,4,1,35,45,18,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,1,8,2,2,2,9,16,0,1,6,1,3,2,8,7,0,3,15,5,34,12,39,28,6,31,0,2,3,1,24,14,0,1,16,149,43,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126239921422594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995521685335747,0.0,0.0,0.11345107316064328,0.0,0.0,0.09413897424422576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879642228180332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734341143978713,0.0,0.24010516330264334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657809186114433,0.1256597201502452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706783697661205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132177694698846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281263686391663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543039320797367,0.3535313180286361,0.0,0.11953540981343652,0.1097400152935958,0.0,0.0,0.27448116609628465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294334241869528,0.0,0.12159864928445235,0.1289337201098642,0.0,0.07667788997707863,0.0,0.2294990135634941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352135929775505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886087793472448,0.0932488139543538,0.0,0.1211298931538066,0.124292662678589,0.0,0.0808019760673964,0.11177718028910184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324774843822823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23057051580975946,0.12135712674570695,0.0,0.0,0.09131058477470176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08823000984795658,0.11048532430362594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23255507998548974,0.0870040646465676,0.12172646130464683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328564010726013,0.0,0.0,0.12281955372401986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097307677917392,0.0,0.0,0.09115958877146203,0.0,0.23868201603162925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298163468343001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330097105470787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931122484501296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259921208995656,0.0,0.0,0.09080300469491198,0.09176236381948677,0.0,0.0,0.10604715439315936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,douxjam,2020/01/05,"Being lonely is one of the worst things. Going through this subreddit, I’ve noticed that there are quite a lot of people that are suffering or going through their own struggles. Many of these posts go un-noticed, or people don’t get a response. If you’re looking for somewhere to vent or get things off your chest, feel free to join this discord server https://discord.gg/elysiancafe There are people who are willing to talk to you and make you feel better about yourself! You don’t have to be lonely!",5.926863354037268,7.8960280217391325,4.798757763975157,84.0667391304348,67.69565217391305,6.561490683229812,28.360248447204967,6.868970318607317,1.4391161490683233,406,14,70,3,7,119,63,92,0.179,0.7390000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.8753,0,4,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,4,1,2,3,7,0,1,3,0,11,1,1,1,0,9,20,5,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,2,0,1,3,2,5,0,1,0,3,5,3,13,17,3,5,0,3,1,0,7,1,0,5,0,51,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961070983367048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22423233985744667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316953739318453,0.0,0.3780523142105779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18620203879730027,0.0,0.0,0.1885116578711712,0.0,0.0,0.14801021917377746,0.2248050718797236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524474235926631,0.0,0.0,0.15025376525411688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4611705890684692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123613889913964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23584307966708776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318061685992209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822265726264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946225287334717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,here4ananswer,2020/01/05,"Does anyone know what this could be? Hi reddit, this is my first time using this platform but I had a little hope I might be able to find an answer to whatever the hell I’m experiencing is called. About 3 weeks ago I experienced severe trauma and attempted to suicide, and ever since then I realised my brain hasn’t been exactly working the same. I cant process information or think ahead into the future to plan anything. I forgot what I do just moments after doing it, I can’t remember when I wake up or go to sleep and sometimes forget when I even arrived to places or why I was there in the first place. My thoughts are all clouded, it’s a bit hard to focus on one topic. I can’t answer any intricate questions and it’s even hard to concentrate on typing this. If anyone knows what this could possibly be and any ways to cope with it, please let me know in the replies. Peace.",4.018662587412589,5.332726443181824,5.043409090909094,83.0173251748252,71.5,7.688111888111888,26.606643356643357,8.139509932561175,1.637608041958042,698,23,137,10,13,229,115,176,0.146,0.782,0.07200000000000001,-0.9272,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,6,8,3,1,0,8,0,19,3,3,1,3,35,29,13,1,4,6,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,12,7,0,1,11,0,0,1,4,2,0,3,5,4,16,1,19,17,3,25,1,0,0,0,4,10,1,7,13,97,28,2,0.1421462334677409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600405935620124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933286263202154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987839030103888,0.0,0.11697423849992555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551868713950795,0.0,0.0,0.15868220713189296,0.14514719727222675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22698440175940654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439312681418355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877724931847731,0.12857940619701969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299190821933678,0.2418190271444468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807849802409529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546702096428685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411832831965814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23435955740613665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453541544227329,0.0,0.0,0.14246786909010606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15079469052626454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632196657117814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29702511938043386,0.1560338786348014,0.0,0.16024852037083556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15923631317764952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16102397276678826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058478350180214,0.0,0.11758483322316128,0.0,0.1422488897775646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405862595693741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15548490814643848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910815667927831,0.0,0.11284823148503008,0.0828866118447687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276870640137627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128290637641401,0.11402113435919416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826486627236294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348415091798516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SesameSnake,2020/01/05,"Triggered by sharp objects and scars. Also hallucinations Alright so my bf of 2 years has some scars and sometimes I cry about it and get very stressed suddenly when I see them, I'm crying in the bathroom now because of it and it's been like this for years, the thing is I know what happened to cause those scars and it's too traumatic for me. I just had a hallucination thing where I pretty much was standing in front of the abuser and wanted to kill him, I've had nightmares where I do try to kill him and stuff so it's pretty common. Even though I've never actually met this abuser. Does anyone get very vivid scenarios kind of like a hallucination? I used to see shit as a kid like creatures coming out of the walls etc. So maybe it's a continuation of it. If anyone wants to have a chat feel free to send a message. Thanks for reading",2.4404215976331365,4.604309236686394,3.75067677514793,86.98506841715978,77.93491124260355,6.118491124260356,22.98853550295858,7.1686216300943375,0.7678547337278108,667,21,137,8,16,218,103,169,0.17600000000000002,0.705,0.11900000000000001,-0.9286,0,0,0,0,2,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,13,11,3,1,10,1,8,1,1,3,1,20,22,15,2,3,2,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,14,9,0,0,2,2,1,3,1,4,0,0,5,5,12,8,21,17,3,18,0,0,3,0,9,6,1,2,11,89,26,1,0.0,0.32186840147181794,0.1325487252393622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862175877301188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899484647468376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279960719268169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953297225494554,0.0,0.11700396327059225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984017892512197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886416910818975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148434241202605,0.08971324202309698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06867881676538926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419292519693617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011242459613722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3005475471359116,0.14144416368372714,0.0746476239673483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19907638594835994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13645767881078186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984935219768704,0.0,0.10475907782065676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763722116408485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13586495241994376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164749719662382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13942569065523922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134337558350021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559073889365574,0.0,0.15549078710050426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505235321348182,0.0,0.0,0.1804764351003561,0.0,0.13345051232466412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922184286669608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731195004596502,0.0,0.2241449725378344,0.16022997764611294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749378090464237
mentalhealth,dodo91,2020/01/05,"How to live with a schizophrenic father? Heyyo. Well, this had been brewing for a decade and there were many signs but I was away a lot of the times and mum decided to ignore obvious symptoms because she was scared of her husband being ""crazy"". After he had 2 strokes, an operation due to his diabetes, he got even worse. He is 59 btw. 

In any case, the fact that my father is a schizophrenic got exremely obvious and it has also impacted our daily lives due to stupid stuff he does as well his suspicious spending of money. I feel like many people out there are taking advatange of him. 

​

He basically thinks he is a messiah that connects with secret cults/aliens that rule the world and is writing a book about it. 

I have been very angry and distant to him due to his weird behaviour but now I sort of pity him. He used to be a very rational, street-smart fella. He still has that buried in him as sometimes he makes a lot of sense and is trying to lead us to the best lives we can, but his disorganized thoughts are becoming more obvious now. 

When I confront him about him being crazy with a bit of sense of humor, he doesnt even deny it. I sort of feel like he is even aware of his problem but still wants to stick with it or something. 

He used an anti-psychotic at some point but decided to stop using it because he was using too many meds and it made him sad. He stopped that and told me that ""if he gets crazy again, he will use it again"", which he obviously doesn't now. 

Anyways, he agreed to go to a doc with me tomorrow. 

But in the meantime, are there any tips you can give? How can I make things better living together with him? Will meds make him sensible again? What are the odds of me having this disease in the future? I also have a pretty bad anxiety disorder, just like my father in his youth. So it got me thinking.",4.184052687038989,5.304938495890411,4.885547945205482,85.03966016859857,70.89041095890411,8.245521601685985,26.91517386722866,8.617729084823388,1.7807513171759748,1441,47,294,24,26,464,189,365,0.157,0.7559999999999999,0.087,-0.983,0,0,1,0,0,0,45.0,3,1,0,3,27,17,2,1,20,0,33,5,0,12,5,62,56,24,0,3,9,5,3,3,0,2,5,0,0,0,20,16,0,3,8,1,2,2,2,9,2,0,14,3,35,8,44,37,6,31,0,2,0,0,48,10,0,7,22,198,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882251422743467,0.0,0.10081855998344423,0.1130647279733522,0.12655303080964425,0.0,0.0711822355093909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742260486689007,0.0,0.07769203401153768,0.11344362178124208,0.10276531751235192,0.0,0.0,0.0976491919604694,0.08229428496001025,0.10158541593516823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106642223171289,0.0,0.0814278128896903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843739742596892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409674728752426,0.1329484580882564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04861426559258476,0.0892610860320571,0.052881894874979435,0.0,0.22325937275980687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363771338947754,0.0,0.3286559109359385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15821387622082336,0.0,0.08804522005725726,0.18633280371270447,0.2830112648033037,0.0,0.0,0.20671294029730847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450846534685427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796138751516692,0.0,0.0,0.09466429162903366,0.0,0.08903533295688952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315828832906436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163367139148984,0.09202784697402706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861811404045727,0.1555862722733164,0.0,0.0,0.1065188509967733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671354588505232,0.06996127301565365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181762552419837,0.11924409279591995,0.0,0.07387051771776622,0.054257624140585936,0.0,0.0,0.08891231351714284,0.0,0.06317416771440801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192649834850177,0.4018223317311427,0.0,0.15355035096710234,0.05488271502243643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16732446368460324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948248873198832,0.0,0.0,0.1130647279733522,0.0
mentalhealth,petigreti,2020/01/05,"Hearing voices before falling asleep This started about one week ago, every night when I am about to fall asleep, I hear this voice telling me things, sharing info. It is not unpleasant, I look forward to heating from them every night. However, when I did some research about this I found very conflicting answers. Some say it is normal and other people say that it is an early symptom of schizophrenia. The voices aren't family members, it's like it is another person. Sometimes he starts telling me about gory things which is weird. Any help or insight to this event would be helpful.",7.025390835579515,8.316356471698114,6.011940700808626,78.93103773584906,64.47169811320754,7.943935309973044,34.01078167115903,7.957251820313856,2.6722630727762806,470,20,76,5,7,141,76,106,0.057,0.8220000000000001,0.121,0.7941,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,10,3,2,0,0,12,16,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,7,0,1,14,1,0,1,4,0,0,3,2,1,0,1,2,8,8,2,9,12,2,13,0,0,1,0,12,1,0,3,12,51,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493004004167123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453615649010668,0.17661042712018998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14331899789513827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838140751387378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15877801492919838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846715457602341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796590090222624,0.0,0.22578617678765436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822849396257676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143628636270175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161147175181184,0.16502272964874376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413051493324228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116766096151699,0.14706398668039786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678798699692909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665786400377776,0.0,0.2384270384479281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17506017446338867,0.0,0.0,0.2944252971205397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237908704545012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389699394393214,0.0,0.0,0.1351020046717062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196457302070464,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ajones_,2020/01/05,"Yesterday I felt like life was going to be so good I was going to die happy, today I beat myself in the head until I passed out This cycle is just become everyday life, I have short day long euphoric cycle and then physically injure myself the next day and feel like I’m on the brink of suicide. I even know in advance when these episodes are coming and can prepare for it but usually I want to feel the pain so I do nothing about it.",5.622022471910113,5.197538617977532,6.599191011235956,79.45339325842697,67.31460674157304,8.917752808988762,29.03595505617977,8.238735603445708,1.929699325842696,343,10,68,4,5,115,63,89,0.10400000000000001,0.764,0.132,-0.0975,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,2,6,5,0,0,4,0,8,5,1,0,0,12,17,9,2,1,2,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,3,3,10,4,11,13,0,22,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,13,47,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320549066260004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809949973448414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27101288103335003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21806563049287936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387786152526742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21248036238483145,0.15010580794455716,0.2017428262188555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23882577263373603,0.17623403523075087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22367074338131354,0.0,0.0,0.21563804786007396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547340896925615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2968201054133213,0.2053026178997264,0.0,0.0,0.18594467990358607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234591055613928,0.0,0.0,0.2016104854635364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22357659326239326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22983110975704704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991639343857331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314113863716922,0.0,0.1239309488668888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eggshop47,2020/01/05,"What’s going on I feel like I’m suspended between two worlds and I don’t want to return to either. Nothing feels real, it’s like I’m about to be unplugged from a system and everything before my eyes has been an act. Is this dissociation? I’m alone and confused",2.199444444444445,4.216834129629632,4.355333333333334,83.07300000000002,78.07407407407408,6.542222222222222,23.76296296296297,7.554174236665415,1.2042785185185183,209,7,41,3,5,72,42,54,0.14,0.74,0.12,-0.2732,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,5,1,1,0,0,9,12,3,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,3,3,2,7,10,1,6,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,3,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465139150265763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846946709963951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30069019970961275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383375784808325,0.2390170790648836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901440036264747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269082837413673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3210292126880687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3808142320598082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3268265543160909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19733822301429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beahux02,2020/01/05,"I feel like i’m under 24/7 surveillance Am i being paranoid? My parents have always been a little over the top with security stuff. They put cameras all over the house, outside and inside. I know they didn’t put any in my room or bathroom, i hope, but i still get this feeling of being watched. I’m uncomfortable in the one place i should feel most comfortable. I feel like i’m going insane, constantly on edge and scoping out every room i walk into to make sure that i don’t see any cameras, but even when i don’t see any i feel like there’s hidden cameras somewhere just watching me and i don’t know what to do.",3.132480000000001,4.693074287999998,4.294599999999999,86.53630000000004,74.12,6.6000000000000005,26.1,7.1686216300943375,1.1892399999999994,486,17,98,5,10,159,79,125,0.068,0.746,0.18600000000000005,0.9099,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,1,5,7,0,0,4,0,11,0,0,1,2,23,27,7,0,2,4,1,5,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,4,6,0,1,7,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,2,9,17,7,12,22,2,20,0,0,4,0,3,13,0,3,6,62,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348465871105113,0.0,0.0,0.3306182989005295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512887771257651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703885133947086,0.0,0.13654222038101088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4097110689650833,0.3473262771612576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466946327923137,0.0,0.09210221735687817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16096177033583495,0.0,0.1869950442494132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781274591019376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23752243481781185,0.16242631496809334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081760555216911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981579341754084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17994803080810726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16931781145476651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32582936081826097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582810722306166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294210227799522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855194937757712,0.0,0.0,0.15273927502360252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,c-harmander241,2020/01/05,"is this schizophrenia or just depression? okay so before I get into what's been going on I'd like to say upfront that I am currently getting treatment for a major depressive disorder and high anxiety, I'm on the medication Lovan (aka prozac) at 60mg and for the first 8 weeks it was working great. 

The most noticeable effect was the little voice in my head that narrates literally every thought or action went quiet, this voice is my voice, and it's like it has multiple personalities it gets sad, it gets angry or jelous but I know that's not me my voice is a good voice, a kind voice. 

These voices have come back and are causing insomnia because I'm overthing everything of a nighttime. 

a little side note is sometimes I hear my parents fighting but in a whisper when it's not really happening, other times voices on a radio.

and when I was young I remember two distinct times of having an imaginary thing appear and try to hurt me but it wasn't a super common occurance. 

can anyone advise me about similar experiences?",5.364593406593407,6.830661389743593,6.483168498168499,73.3898076923077,68.43589743589743,9.468864468864467,31.36446886446886,9.784248007369934,3.2697545787545783,821,34,139,19,14,275,126,195,0.122,0.7959999999999999,0.081,-0.7923,2,0,0,0,2,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,6,12,1,0,13,1,15,4,1,2,1,25,29,15,0,0,9,1,0,2,0,0,3,12,0,1,16,8,0,0,4,1,0,5,3,5,0,2,7,12,13,7,14,22,2,26,0,4,0,0,6,11,0,5,12,93,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155062056905753,0.0,0.0,0.10557505051440902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610125514586292,0.0,0.09204152003640904,0.0,0.12848055591554114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551073404449484,0.0,0.13006369226666248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26009328539007953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17304652595938885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721478201082642,0.0,0.13569921727665682,0.14769625794898816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12843120403358804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31554217542339186,0.0,0.08581055347623799,0.12664244681577014,0.0,0.1664659544888114,0.0,0.0,0.13351911331367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495831989444686,0.0,0.1701756265879474,0.0,0.0,0.1595282152820537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616368948595632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15723185492212774,0.0829796300974274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14753124068493076,0.3026613774674117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15210557737957486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190202779769628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765546545714788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183780965087408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672744813788757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17104115374971826,0.0,0.0,0.1200725483631256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14933202569116275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031041197292843,0.0,0.0,0.11986843561343224,0.17608585202238114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251164996621437,0.0,0.14749435681226314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211143038986716,0.0,0.0,0.13996835685301862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992182259381472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trhowiwayay,2020/01/05,"Vent + Is my father being manipulative? quick backstory: my mother and father are separated. they lived together for my whole life up until i graduated high school when my parents went their separate ways. i ended up living with my mother because it was my father who cheated on my mother (multiple times) and me going with him would be seen as taking his side by most of my family.

let me describe my mother: she is not a well-adjusted individual. her mother was abusive and she is old fashioned to say the least. she has been a victim of domestic abuse in previous relationships before my father.  
i think all the abuse she endured has manifested as a sort of moodiness that constantly keeps me on edge. my siblings are never a victim of her mood swings but i always seem to be at the wrong place at the wrong time.  
i think it's because i remind her so much of my father as she tends to say but i can't be sure because i know discussing my father with her is always a bad idea. she's never physically violent but she always finds a way to belittle or berate me for any of my insecurities she can immediately think of and then say that i'm the one overreacting when i tell her that my feelings are hurt or that she went too far. hence why i do not have a very good relationship with her.

as for my father: i actually don't know very much about him. he's not abusive that much i do know. for most of my life he was just the father figure that showed up in the evenings who would sometimes lecture me for an hour straight because i did something stupid. he's very level-headed most of the time and always finds an opportunity to lecture me about life and how i should be doing more to get ahead while i'm still young. i know he used to be a very good artist but he never mentioned when he started to draw or if he still enjoyed drawing. i also know that he was a smart student and that when he was very young he dropped out of school to get a job and support his family and that's all he's being doing since.  
i used to have a good relationship with my father but recently i've been wondering if he's been manipulating me.

regarding the separation: my father has told me his side of the story several times. my mother didn't do enough to make him feel loved so he cheated on her.  
over and over he's told me that if it weren't for me and my siblings that he would have cut ties with my mother a long time ago. he tells me so often that the whole reason why he stayed and the whole reason why he keeps working more than anything is to support me and my siblings and not for my mother.  
he is married now and he wants me to move in with him and his new family whom i've never met. i don't want to meet them mostly out of spite for how he split my life in half and also because meeting them would split my life even further and would give him more reason to encourage me to move in with him.  
now every time he visits he always brings up the subject of me getting to know his new wife and step-child. i've become so tired of hearing it because i always tell him that i don't want to meet them and he always ends the conversation with ""no pressure"" or ""i don't want to pressure you"". i have tried to tell him that i am uncomfortable with how often he brings it up and that it feels like pressure but last time i tried he laughed it off. he said it would be like me saying i feel pressured by him talking about how he wants to go to the moon so there's no reason for me to feel pressured.

am i overthinking it or am i justified in thinking he may be trying to manipulate me into sympathizing with him? also is there any advice i can get about navigating around my mother's tendency to lash out at me?  
any feedback would be appreciated but please know that i'm in a *very* financially unstable situation so moving out or seeing a therapist is not a very good option for me at the moment.  
thank you!",5.6810056258790445,5.400606411392406,6.671350210970466,78.50066807313644,67.16455696202532,9.452601969057666,29.58087201125176,9.029198982220553,2.200364838255977,3075,95,627,48,45,1032,285,790,0.134,0.7909999999999999,0.076,-0.9935,3,0,1,0,2,0,49.0,0,2,5,3,35,36,8,6,33,0,64,7,0,14,7,127,120,61,0,16,22,21,5,2,0,9,6,6,0,0,28,38,0,2,26,2,0,10,18,19,0,2,18,13,113,16,101,82,17,88,0,1,2,1,118,35,0,20,41,438,141,9,0.0,0.23146243901038324,0.047659309039545766,0.0,0.0,0.047724395012371766,0.04329236359008765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716833852079847,0.28446267974867273,0.0,0.0,0.09963551840064244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04018990570372587,0.04347659936509917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040778088757555,0.17862889561960762,0.05393826139362868,0.041557947258852784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05277704402884559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865127901366141,0.050463202642113104,0.0,0.0645147076110638,0.0,0.041148523709904655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812171032177167,0.0,0.12347100836998487,0.03489021810973501,0.0,0.0,0.08927496736761208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020643551138526,0.04685031786232337,0.055512064533137714,0.16385359132354824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050122367852510966,0.0,0.05504451365491552,0.0,0.0,0.05160053293471597,0.0,0.0,0.048096062610313066,0.0,0.052282600303147714,0.055132696497638176,0.0,0.0,0.048464653053253384,0.08681976565205551,0.0,0.0,0.18788245011878946,0.03980987757617963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04994065218811543,0.17248030504340042,0.047720026394093784,0.0,0.08625054085242853,0.04322051576163695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04407863275723893,0.0,0.03260006299192506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572271771009094,0.1077057012474724,0.0,0.1506689786879924,0.0943370118711626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05124776665728276,0.0,0.033094216327773304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054229349658999865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05102581428450655,0.05360998241440371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008563557736764,0.048222104648454105,0.1573027427493396,0.0,0.0,0.04645657603506216,0.15535327027666546,0.0,0.09885429325556064,0.03891794345677405,0.0444607157033628,0.0,0.05517357829514547,0.0,0.04039969330024912,0.054896495001872166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03759824603894275,0.04830250307922517,0.0,0.03456812576987598,0.05205531888661362,0.0780049424941327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084265109023553,0.046029687097547886,0.0,0.03672045708315725,0.03925451827436851,0.17074792803616878,0.04496390845827529,0.0,0.05670523664401765,0.0,0.1251748975737728,0.0,0.0,0.19934676299699028,0.05613264549675556,0.0,0.09333451642424953,0.0,0.09947436121418424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436152775028084,0.0,0.2820780112213468,0.1440309970587302,0.07753142044730388,0.0,0.0,0.04391165656975697,0.09054751593431462,0.13220738890958178,0.16357924813733854,0.0,0.0,0.052963245577254944,0.03555499330928842,0.0,0.0,0.2428541723778005,0.10679441678479946,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jakub_friso,2020/01/05,"How can psychology help me in my self-exploration (career choice)?  I've been trying for quite some time to find out about who I am, what are my strengths and talents and my interests - all within the context of my future work of choice (career).

I am now very interested (and kind of desperate) to engage in some internal self-exploration, contemplation, evaluation... For now, get a good grounding with just pen and paper and thoughts to think through my next step and stop this chaotic direction of my life.

What I am looking for are some tests, exercises, books or papers to help me guide myself to some sensible picture of myself, my personality, my strengths, and talents, my interests... Upon which, later on, I can base off my decisions and really distill my best options going forward.

I need some guidance and help in this journey to get to the desired results and also to help me avoid dead ends, misconceptions, defense mechanisms, my self induced, inauthentic lies and illusions - just in general, all the traps laid in this path that I might fall into once again.

I have read a book A Job to Love (by The School of Life, ISBN: 0993538754) and it alone already help me to move ahead pretty significantly in my ""soul searching"". And it was comprised of some theory about this topic and a lot of exercises. Exercises were the real help to me in this case. Just a few guiding, well constructed (and ordered) questions (which I would have never thought of) and then on my part - a lot of journaling.

Also, our school psychologist had several tests for students who came with this problem to her. I never went to her but from what I heard they were aimed at many areas of intelligence (I guess) - spacial, verbal, analytical. etc... Plus she gave them some personality tests (don't know if Big Five or Myers Briggs or any other). I don't know how helpful or valid her evaluations were but I just wanted to mention this, it might help.",9.316948215183508,8.262299880341883,9.002523881347411,67.29361990950228,60.16809116809117,12.019507290095527,38.88067705714765,11.088447113337141,4.311148349254232,1522,64,263,33,17,492,195,351,0.046,0.828,0.126,0.9672,1,2,0,0,0,0,70.0,1,0,2,6,14,16,1,1,11,0,20,6,0,4,4,72,37,29,1,6,11,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,3,19,22,0,3,9,6,0,8,4,3,1,1,12,2,41,13,53,22,15,40,1,0,1,1,25,19,0,19,14,198,60,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419536010650847,0.1110189695257551,0.1609058980161056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841414141803234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557764733724627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506412695581875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910524610925356,0.0,0.1122000068242424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195019518067746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512283174592828,0.0,0.0571755478519074,0.08438182699757069,0.0,0.0,0.11082660212403543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5394617002124287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983390504664966,0.0,0.0,0.1047635410886106,0.11057860878808616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421191017478177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448198711552718,0.0,0.0,0.17105977522336194,0.0907990000967711,0.0,0.0,0.10199662317727176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21344980263119046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692608622338233,0.0,0.07459656024115385,0.15518394916893938,0.0,0.1069934508497436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713993210198701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894428292304507,0.0,0.0,0.1756869916116214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235039324325716,0.0,0.09626440111539447,0.0,0.0,0.1126994574572495,0.10700469310870964,0.10063118303824688,0.1145093294164304,0.06444947172065649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20363315333105025,0.0,0.0,0.3148556078642173,0.11365383696338426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410941378418556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446295419092676,0.0,0.1597366104449357,0.05866297704942223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830348378587603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300880159601268,0.05933882109229414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904550404520418,0.09326087713929827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324087974122992,0.0,0.0,0.07146616542135892,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thetiredraven,2020/01/05,"Built-up problems I have been dealing with obsessive compulsive disorder for several years. Consistently since sometime around middle school, my own thoughts threaten me with horrible things like deaths of others or Hell. It has made dealing with everyday things like school much more difficult than it should have been; my grades were shit throughout high school and, frankly, continue to be shit in my classes at a local community college. I went to a doctor recently and opened up about symptoms I hadn't been open about before - it had been a mix of me not knowing how to acknowledge those symptoms and downplaying them. I was referred to a specialist to check for psychosis and they found that what I'm dealing with is specifically _undertreated_ OCD. While I am relieved that it's not a psychotic disorder, it's still a pain to deal with OCD. I will be seeing a specialist soon that specifically deals with OCD; I also hope for a medication change.

The last few months made up my first quarter at the community college. Like throughout most of high school, I managed to severely fuck up the grade of one of my classes and have thus caused my financial aid (through FAFSA) to be suspended for academic reasons. This ongoing trend, caused by a complete lack of self-motivation, has caused me to feel absolutely worthless most of the time. I feel like what I'm doing isn't amounting to anything. This paired with frequent depressive episodes makes me want to stop living altogether, as a feeling of being trapped and worthlessness makes me feel like I have no reason to live, even though it's not true. I have good relationships with my friends and family, but I still almost constantly want to just end my life.",10.782982782689624,9.376302563517918,9.412957189390418,66.63352605863196,57.56677524429968,13.331689157747785,43.7526756630991,12.161744961471696,5.356929455560726,1385,67,232,35,14,428,173,307,0.142,0.7979999999999999,0.06,-0.9623,0,1,0,0,0,1,30.0,0,0,2,1,11,21,4,1,14,0,25,9,2,11,1,55,44,14,1,6,6,0,4,5,1,2,6,0,0,0,17,18,0,1,11,0,1,1,6,11,0,3,13,5,27,10,46,25,8,30,1,3,1,1,9,13,4,5,21,161,44,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520680081319416,0.0,0.0,0.0680476058734352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07002301725731662,0.07574943544467057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240656097920442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26223709161794384,0.09001547673533197,0.0,0.08921677170382511,0.09195363363292013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43862776909800105,0.07328914556245476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950443589667308,0.08709470989353725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536577270636811,0.0,0.0,0.05620210355434418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021665089048201,0.0,0.17209918557371914,0.12157870500218786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237874820999111,0.0,0.09329838845925896,0.06574144710536696,0.07866567906290496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137067537246335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980758824419846,0.0,0.0845150146091794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04676403837037287,0.06936089288385815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060102611166273995,0.20785693404870664,0.0,0.1502746275416763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16103118441716674,0.11359841400481575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572068890370582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679191876136976,0.0,0.06255201022167753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05766017213676135,0.0,0.09054330758368326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142103064596143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17497637553897016,0.08401754636786303,0.09135637815259584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3444683813703122,0.06780687285962761,0.0,0.08876894539043187,0.19225824780926112,0.1746903116559828,0.07038853094127527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415762484296185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590829186534445,0.07114026657815932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768852054992425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306196349495096,0.0,0.08360192256924688,0.06755311051449123,0.04961751173623104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10037828968279464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888063134081788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479610722944305
mentalhealth,squidsugar,2020/01/05,"I need advice on how to help a friend who has low self esteem and anxiety My friend texted me late at night asking if I was awake and could talk. He told me he felt like a horrible person, that he wanted to escape how he was feeling, that he was worried about his mental health, that no one really likes him and he also said ""I would be lying if I said I didn't think about how nice it would be if I wasn't alive and I didn't feel this way"". He said all these things despite knowing that things in his life are good and that people think he's a nice person.

He also said he wanted to calm down and fall asleep. Like physically calm down, but I don't know if he was having an anxiety or panic attack or what. Towards the end of our conversation he said ""I've pushed it out and I think being alone with my thoughts for longer is going to pull me back into badness""

I just want to help my friend, know how to be more supportive for him when stuff like this happens. Also would like to know what exactly happened. Any advice or comments are greatly appreciated.",5.690416666666668,5.176551652777782,6.125370370370373,83.20666666666669,67.19444444444444,8.866666666666667,26.796296296296298,8.07648339933343,1.417285185185185,831,19,176,9,12,269,121,216,0.106,0.6970000000000001,0.19699999999999998,0.9577,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,0,0,13,19,1,1,5,0,21,3,1,4,2,44,47,23,0,12,9,0,3,5,3,3,2,5,0,3,16,10,0,0,11,0,0,4,5,4,0,1,15,8,21,15,21,24,2,19,0,1,0,0,36,9,0,7,10,113,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19739332767223125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460621064733043,0.0,0.2423105440357209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868390378530796,0.0,0.15453043783057474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442197136238584,0.11490281750084735,0.0,0.07766326355845908,0.08433132189397821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080640798561235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945659513781526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021379242497641,0.0,0.09697646065265644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340985492336889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05740099555641876,0.08471455121122143,0.0,0.11135357047374426,0.0,0.0,0.17862907811536807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735896532919778,0.0,0.0,0.1353972100842699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220292579660224,0.0,0.11393312970089275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713397442997703,0.2467190732353705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178489711201193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489070037452644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09478226574247614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844065268873915,0.0,0.0,0.11850249808009568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700211318350119,0.17637973930638662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06470360108193565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4803737236187972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536570280439407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562157723726978,0.0,0.11461433791377415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118049465414197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420068461660808,0.19415141014395568,0.0,0.08018323226299673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651044700977937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17871839626255234,0.08016961282212602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025710602624712,0.0,0.2152438864815631,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Negative-Presence,2020/01/05,"Trying so hard, but people won't let my past go. Two years ago (literally on boxing day) my boyfriend (and fiance for about a day) asked me to marry him. We were dating for 5 years, he put me through hell and back, and I still stayed (stupid, I know). We were going through another one of his cheating episodes, but little did I know he was living with the girl after I kicked him out and we were trying to work on things. 
Anyways, boxing day he asked me to marry him and stupid ass me said yes... The same night he decided to ""go sleep at his apartment"" and literally went to her house, fucked her, and slept. 
Obviously we broke up for good (he left me for her like 2 weeks later) I was absolutely heart broken. 
End of June hits (4-5 months of literally not leaving my house, crying, depression) I found out he took his new gf and he's daughter to the lake house we were planning our wedding.... That was it. I tried to kill myself. I didn't succeed thank God.
I ended up in the hospital and only my family and he knew (due to my family fucking losing it).

That same year I picked my life back up 100%. I went back to college. Graduated on time with a nursing aid degree and was accepted to nursing school, found a great boyfriend, and things were starting to finally be amazing. 

Fast forward to three days before Christmas this year. (2 years later)
My amazing new bf and I are engaged and just posted our engagement announcement.
An hour later I get a message from some random person ""someone has put you on this website just trashing you""
And sends me the link...
The link was to a website a lot of my town uses 
""This girl is a piece of shit, blah blah blah whore, blah blah blah engaged three times in a year (WHAT?! TO WHO) Oh btw SHE TRIED TO KILL HERSELF AND WAS PUT IN THE HOSPITAL SHES SUCH A LIAR SHE FAKES IT SHES MENTALLY ILL.

....
I can't remove the post because apparently it's not illegal to post stuff like this.
Now everyone I know... And people I don't have been messaging me very hateful messages.
I've done nothing but try so hard the last two years. My work found out and I am now on leave...
I can't believe this is happening to me.. what did I do so god damn wrong in life...

I don't have any friends (even prior to this) I stay to myself and my IG account (which I now had to delete).

Why can't people just fucking stop. 
Do you not realize how much it hurts.",1.455978947368422,3.725266482105269,2.89605263157895,91.21986842105262,82.07368421052631,5.821052631578947,22.13157894736842,7.087006719466742,0.6720947368421051,1829,60,386,24,50,595,235,475,0.22899999999999998,0.687,0.085,-0.9979,1,0,0,0,0,1,90.0,7,3,0,5,18,33,13,0,19,1,36,12,5,3,1,60,63,26,2,0,9,1,2,8,3,1,3,1,0,3,20,29,0,1,12,0,1,12,10,20,0,5,26,3,66,13,52,33,6,80,1,4,0,5,48,21,7,3,46,244,86,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367368757269895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04884742052783172,0.07532087741991822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343042398004158,0.0,0.0,0.1657003993160638,0.0,0.043787400933003366,0.0,0.061122736909859164,0.0809287358963306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789027824411201,0.18529974496720425,0.0,0.06186777968710419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735078676028717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12724157133944292,0.0,0.0,0.047443578908815405,0.0,0.0,0.06863742639253036,0.0,0.0,0.13543140792385205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868715183496522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362763584454851,0.0554963130571668,0.1992193058269256,0.037528638545600436,0.0,0.12246933040199565,0.060248283510149575,0.0,0.07919373222012534,0.0,0.0,0.06351975656825402,0.0,0.12869261074385935,0.07091806319781825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08511986710591744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073888811252686,0.2486493649656625,0.07689637804744731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15894031858443486,0.0,0.11842901978078173,0.05855170512504523,0.0,0.15211693285968653,0.07804439569521911,0.07345187975209022,0.10147246437976301,0.07018582030652128,0.07199335189628668,0.06342792972928929,0.0,0.0,0.08036031354676781,0.0,0.06106799414959501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238857139154145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057334674917590825,0.0,0.05280391738340541,0.0,0.0,0.13874930639734653,0.0,0.06740835826361104,0.0,0.06892360871679437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0486744223731972,0.05463057514447183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857064515741486,0.14939533795010695,0.06271990105148452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20638220798083146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21662944058177244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832755855425662,0.0,0.0,0.07269662432355299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07373330410704489,0.0,0.0,0.07188269498251032,0.0,0.06086202036728423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05084222384080718,0.15312419264825547,0.057364185339085785,0.060053781576547074,0.0,0.0,0.08222910309603289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613216793446644,0.0,0.0,0.09544240957941323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377025714138045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798066836004722,0.2438420571280613,0.0,0.14033654669195522,0.0,0.0,0.062038765219518476,0.0,0.05926794892149359,0.0,0.0,0.057618350733830974,0.0,0.0,0.13317577886659013,0.06481614214104693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045873843738754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853572506746741,0.0,0.32379684940182824
mentalhealth,WaxCrane,2020/01/05,"What do you wish you knew before getting help/medicine for mental health stuff? Hello, I’m new to reddit. I’m 17F and have been dealing with mental health troubles for the past 7 years. I have a doctors appointment on Tuesday and I have no idea what to expect or how to feel. Is there anything you guys wish you knew before getting help (whether in the form of medicine, therapy, etc)? This is my first doctors appointment, but I’ve been going to counseling for awhile. I’m just sort of nervous.",4.790661654135338,6.281202652631581,4.608120300751882,86.19684210526316,69.84210526315789,7.112781954887217,30.413533834586467,7.447530270364453,1.8461428571428584,392,16,74,4,7,120,62,95,0.076,0.8640000000000001,0.06,-0.3611,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,4,0,1,3,2,0,1,3,0,8,4,0,1,0,16,19,6,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,4,1,7,0,12,15,2,8,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,2,5,46,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857428725185655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28658255451004383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17360728758164526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3447177176771272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780432893102875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514529547429353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323623628676324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17595830365945986,0.0,0.09570244868533588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673698409418375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579908595916112,0.0,0.0,0.2257425054151085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900968411758394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394040050483144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263641270878082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16075156027939552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19277136145820828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19257373351989635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3872906224540729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844050714913964
mentalhealth,Pokemon72104,2020/01/05,"I extremely hesitant I always feel sad, but I never like to call myself depressed because I am scared I down playing the word. Like right now I isolating myself from people and my biggest fear is if I am doing it for attention and not knowing I am.",9.756122448979593,6.630952877551023,10.340510204081637,64.56341836734697,61.04081632653061,13.06530612244898,42.867346938775505,11.20814326018867,4.914257142857143,197,9,34,4,2,68,37,49,0.33,0.575,0.095,-0.9262,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,2,1,0,5,0,0,0,1,10,7,4,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,11,3,4,7,0,5,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,1,4,29,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865112415246082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20990117632157546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516007756285357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965720608217092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38746846409891067,0.17410426107315266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189235488085044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364457795970642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655695408523972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23871598149633844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940570653495512,0.0,0.0,0.3447357197759772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bobgoogwin0987,2020/01/05,sudden urge to scream until my throat breaks It’s what the title says. I have this sudden urge to scream until my throat breaks. I’m not sure. I’m a 17yr male with mdd and anxiety. I DONT know if this is the right place to post but it’s weird. I’ve been having this urge for 3 days straight now.,-0.4298437499999999,1.7233732031250035,0.8049999999999997,103.54,90.40625,3.825,11.125,5.148860815047168,-1.7420874999999998,231,2,57,1,8,72,44,64,0.14300000000000002,0.818,0.039,-0.4991,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,5,2,2,0,1,7,8,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,3,4,1,7,7,0,12,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,6,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904821516777725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448857870917785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4450250149741207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086823071714244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39672301752619066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36366352943133656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3242758927417723,0.0,0.3019658727202054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578783918921277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,woah_dontzuccmedude,2020/01/05,"My dad won't pay to exterminate and I think I'm actually losing my mind I've started living at my dads since september to be closer to where Im studying A-Levels. He has a cockroach problem. He's got loads of cockroach spray, but he wont actually get an exterminator.

I'm not sleeping properly anymore. I've gotten ""used"" to the sight of them, if ""used"" means i dont scream and jump at the sight of them 100% of the time anymore. Sometimes i think I'm over it and i just sit up, pick up the spray and kill it. Sometimes I jump and just have like a breakdown but its all internal because if my dad sees mw crying or some shit like that he'll get all concerned. Its like, cockroaches make a noise when they fall down? And the boiler drips onto my blanket sometimes so the sound is really similiar. I'm not coping bruh. I can't put my head down properly without thinking about them. I swear to god I'm feeling them when they're not there. I feel like its on my skin, i check to look, and there's nothing. Sometimes there is. I cant just ignore it as a figment of my imagination, because sometimes it's not.

I didn't sleep today and i have am exam tomorrow and im wondering if its because of lack of sleep as iw as studying and i think i saw a rat. It may not have been a rat and i may have been imagining it. I do have a history of mental health issues though nothing that would explain hallucinations. I am also autistic , but i dont know much about that so im not sure if that would be relevant to my situation rn. I know this might sound lame, but I've been in a meltdown thats been lasting about two or three months and coming and going because of this cockroach problem, but i cant just go anywhere? What do i do? Please i really need help? Also, I'm 17 so there's not actually *that* much I can do by myself please keep that in mind i will really appreciate any advice in two areas

No matter what i do, there are always cockroaches in my room (its quite small and humid) [my room](https://imgur.com/a/abx4lpu), i don't know how to keep them out. Its usually much neater than in that picture. I keep it very clean. I *never* bring food in there. *Apart* from cockroach spray, if anyone has advice on how to keep out the roaches it would be very appreciated

Secondly: i think i am spiralling. Even if the roach problem goes, im not well i think. I dont know how to tell people because the idea was that id move to london and I'd get better, so its mot like i have a community team here or anything. Im quite worried for myself at the moment",1.3340075065505277,3.5169596137667334,3.3038570214574072,88.62595195099499,81.92543021032505,6.092047305431628,22.878301819984426,7.315561048560121,0.9024509170738616,1990,69,420,29,54,670,228,523,0.08800000000000001,0.799,0.113,0.9031,0,0,0,0,0,0,70.0,0,0,6,5,29,17,2,0,20,0,45,8,6,7,4,94,88,44,1,14,27,3,3,5,0,10,1,3,2,0,28,18,1,5,18,1,2,9,21,9,1,4,9,11,52,8,50,66,7,46,0,2,5,0,17,25,1,14,16,271,80,3,0.0,0.0,0.19171700557434904,0.0,0.0,0.1279858827024029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473953782945396,0.05449026219652423,0.0,0.0,0.04453326845984463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298906141073194,0.04578989199248088,0.0,0.053890055137254866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19960072198666495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05791775133931922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05641107810998315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193417287361295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302501195475757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04325341263492679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622418572426846,0.04678378176712564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918689640753222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10264244768041286,0.0,0.07443531319846583,0.0,0.05237577490732745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720834796413018,0.069609404257523,0.0,0.0,0.04389442047618855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392662416343564,0.3536848985990821,0.06835120338685415,0.0,0.2328307009468336,0.07245143960652921,0.0,0.14395932680017567,0.05338048099448013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15996770883755548,0.0,0.057826042643893585,0.0,0.05499241727303567,0.07326297638698169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043712946356825,0.0,0.0,0.07133432142598069,0.0,0.0,0.06599528999422563,0.06947114416881506,0.13224599612476906,0.0,0.052270937596555433,0.06960210278822983,0.14442099520240714,0.04855763113508384,0.05050745595688879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256726982526108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04540030036175347,0.0,0.0,0.1437696783623778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18798606526989545,0.0,0.0658323198338068,0.0,0.13930654177346558,0.0,0.0,0.12585755956624448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052184499614779854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06722125735092832,0.05417135624871039,0.07360990504186896,0.19660227614983264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238405898978697,0.0,0.04635189287238056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06172053236261967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05723834813319874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517677765324594,0.06434044680310419,0.0,0.03818587870061383,0.0,0.06207382758717647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794217260662746,0.0,0.0,0.11311913532318205,0.07212445638639127,0.10806693380590644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05888049629071467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312693662794677,0.07101763924122961,0.0,0.06650502244539899,0.0,0.13955982774342815,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,infinitrinx,2020/01/05,"What are your experiences with going inpatient? i've heard a lot of different opinions about going inpatient. some say it is extremely helpful, others say it made them worse and traumatised them further. what are your experiences with going inpatient?",7.474756097560978,10.998709097560976,7.402621951219512,60.245884146341496,67.78048780487805,11.904878048780489,37.079268292682926,11.20814326018867,6.02050731707317,207,11,26,8,4,66,29,41,0.149,0.7829999999999999,0.067,-0.5813,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,7,8,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,4,0,4,6,2,4,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,3,0,20,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847614576091567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5332212290107526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4646970352068357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826875460130166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23171610177173604,0.0,0.2578976719188322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43349257928221946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777563354814708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jeldreen,2020/01/05,"Problem with sleep and night panic Hi! Since some days, I have a problem with sleeping.
I go to bed as I've always done, but instead of falling asleep, I just start turning around, I get hot and my heartbeat accelerates. During this process I have a storm of thoughts flooding my mind I don't know how to get rid of. This goes on for hours. When I'm so tired that I start falling asleep, I get right away that sensation of suddenly falling and waking up with a gasp and my heart racing again. I noticed that this gets worst when I work/study till late, while it's less strong when I go to bed earlier. 

Last night was the worst ever and it started to worry me, that's why I'm writing here. I turned off the lights at past 1 am because I had been having a conversation via texts about aeronautical engines with a friend (we're aerospace engineering students at the most stresful university of our country). All I know is that at half past 3 am I was still awake, my heart pounding and thoughts storming. I experienced the fall-down-and-wake-up (I don't know how to call it) at least more than 5 times, wincing in my bed any time I was close to sleeping. I got up, drank some water, walked around the house. Got back to bed, listened to 10 mins of relaxing music and that kind of helped clearing my mind, but I never really fell into a deep sleep till when the alarm started off.

Along with this, I think I'm becoming slightly hypochondriac because I'm often worried of being sick or of getting some sort of incurable illness and I tend to see everything way worse than it actually is. Like, I realize my way of worrying and seeing things is wrong - still it happens and I don't know how to stop doing so.

I don't know what happens to me at night, every time it's like experiencing small panic attacks. I did experience some panic attacks by day in June during the summer exams session that would get to me out of the blue and I would suddenly feel like I couldn't breathe, sweat cold, feel my hands freeze and my head dizzy and heart pounding. But then I would just tell myself that I was an idiot and it was all in my mind and I could breathe so I handled it in some minutes and got back to normal. I thought that was solved, but now similar things have started to happen to me again but at night and somehow I don't feel as strong as to fight them again.

I'm worried and I don't know what to do.
Has this ever happened to you? Do you have any tips? How do I get rid of all of this? Thank you.",4.09006816245385,5.028606453280325,4.723803464924738,86.79233399602388,70.94831013916502,7.498074410678786,28.28792956546436,7.6583078777640585,1.5072865549559782,1958,70,411,22,35,627,235,503,0.17300000000000001,0.762,0.065,-0.9955,0,0,0,0,1,0,53.0,1,3,1,2,30,22,4,4,15,0,37,20,15,4,7,84,84,42,0,8,8,0,6,3,1,3,3,1,4,0,27,29,2,1,14,1,0,7,8,13,0,1,17,14,56,9,68,61,14,77,0,0,3,0,14,24,0,10,47,272,83,3,0.0,0.0,0.06513625647459473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553954407697461,0.0,0.0,0.0907816305818786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188394453867765,0.0,0.1518705920354258,0.06271178626665297,0.10264992689095292,0.0,0.08137771887822894,0.0737177373892245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815700030339751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053292713294928365,0.0,0.0,0.08609366069260767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830620746681376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075447258888015,0.05623792807603063,0.0,0.05998864833592073,0.06529218853613397,0.0,0.0,0.10124912967190787,0.04768466520075905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05156921016680383,0.0,0.2441109146308432,0.0,0.0758686633468485,0.0,0.16015301863697576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23609955298026705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850253336333832,0.0,0.0,0.23728951029415815,0.04473966544660957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573317013480091,0.07701803749585992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950759659061466,0.2200971803165581,0.05440839257389636,0.07529446290555901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782885885738432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20218885085242436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148004364920108,0.0,0.0,0.25055327842875136,0.06539870439025734,0.0,0.07599285022229517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23494260105025255,0.0,0.0,0.12743671846284568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277373232946854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04276037096768805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057002284640634185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637876199005716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05521449717444483,0.0,0.26718414977159394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23622229857805646,0.0,0.10660981124102896,0.0558041771214989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834054803354915,0.061452436731892914,0.0,0.0,0.08868858861591199,0.04276931619896654,0.0,0.15897097068580013,0.11676359450584707,0.07671681498026649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14520495026722674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596264588949136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06022953728169201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048593217354969485,0.2711426575357555,0.06802174420927326,0.1422472363296048,0.07297827708724751,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xansational,2020/01/05,"Why does minor stress or anxiety cause me to, as I call it, “go away”? (Long post, TL;DR at the end) What I refer to as “going away” is, in essence, a fesling of detachment from my body and mind. I feel like my entire body has gone numb preventing me from speaking and being able to tell people around me what’s going on. I have a few grounding techniques like trying to focus on touching my fingers together in a specific order or trying to describe the feeling of my feet in my shoes in my head. This used to only happen occasionally when I was younger but since I turned 14 (I think) it’s been happening quite frequently. I think my parents can realize when it’s happening now because I’ve brought it up to them a few times. 

For some background, I’m a 16 year old diagnosed with major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, and gender dysphoria disorder. I’ve experimented with a few drugs, mostly weed, nic, and ecstasy. I only included the dysphoria because even though I don’t like bringing attention to that aspect of myself, my psychiatrist thinks the intense anxiety that stems from it could have something to do with it even though things that trigger my dysphoria don’t always make me “go away”. I’ve also had this phenomenon where, and this has been happening for as long as I can remember, I will worry that I’m hallucinating everything and I’m actually doing something inappropriate or something that i shouldn’t otherwise be doing but I don’t know it because in my mind I’m somewhere else if that makes sense. The most frequent one is where I’ll be using the bathroom and I get a sudden rush of anxiety and start to think to myself, “what if I’m actually sitting at the dinner table with my family and I’m going in my pants and I’m just hallucinating that I’m in the bathroom?” but I think that’s probably due to social anxiety. 

What’s odd is that something small and stupid could trigger it or sometimes it comes on without any trigger at all. The last times I can recall in detail of this happening were last night when my mom made a joke about me finishing some chips or something when she wanted them and I felt conflicted on whether she was serious or not and a very strong sense of guilt which made me go away. Another time, that to my knowledge didn’t have a trigger, was when my dad and I were pulling out of a shopping center and I just felt myself slip away and tried to ground myself with the finger thing. My dad kept trying to encourage me to come out of it by saying things like “come on lucas, talk to me, you can do it” and it passed after 30 seconds to a minute. I also remember this happening when I was at a chinese buffet with my parents that has a sad and grungy atmosphere and it made me go away. 

My dad thinks this could be dissociation but after some quick googling I don’t think that’s what it is because it doesn’t sound like the results I got however I am in no way a professional and neither is google. Any help or advice or even solidarity would be greatly appreciated. 

TL;DR stress or tension sometimes makes my body go numb and feel like I’m not in control of it and cannot move it or speak and this sometimes happens unprovoked. I also sometimes feel like I’m hallucinating my surroundings or am watching somebody else’s life through a first-person movie. I’m 16 with a few diagnosed mental health issues and have been on antidepressants and anxiety meds for over two years now, as well as a few other drugs such as weed, nicotine, and ecstasy most frequently.",6.547235294117647,6.7736810176470605,7.1955882352941165,73.75264705882357,65.29411764705883,10.447058823529412,34.20588235294117,10.241411754978122,3.4819147058823523,2812,117,516,62,40,931,282,680,0.09699999999999999,0.8240000000000001,0.079,-0.8151,3,0,7,0,0,0,51.0,0,1,2,3,25,22,1,4,29,0,50,17,8,15,1,116,110,62,0,8,23,6,9,7,0,3,8,4,0,0,46,39,1,4,20,2,1,18,13,10,1,3,20,14,64,12,84,79,14,90,0,2,1,0,20,38,0,19,37,359,110,1,0.0525666031697289,0.0,0.1025948437399722,0.0,0.0,0.05136747623445671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611248068912473,0.04373962485999594,0.0,0.0,0.07149418548209305,0.05512066679002448,0.24127984526233545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04679542158811621,0.0,0.0,0.2963283243883334,0.0,0.0,0.12817645354678375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17516893748748946,0.0,0.0,0.05367637913486503,0.0,0.0,0.05400038159257555,0.0,0.13584442219674142,0.0,0.0,0.058957915283844115,0.1259104657427966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04527553828348933,0.10670799139794186,0.0,0.0,0.18073764416829444,0.0,0.046001388673917364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192114176981975,0.0,0.0878253034982322,0.0,0.04655840781393925,0.0,0.0,0.10415923687849224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04724347341481313,0.05142022464031349,0.04955511516054399,0.0,0.10631701604926276,0.11266077542327485,0.10094436517426077,0.0,0.0,0.04471312580250973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02746388054964797,0.0,0.2389984958336189,0.0,0.04204231460541991,0.05795486557103749,0.0,0.0,0.3253913150538283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05394850031752348,0.055875841044238386,0.0,0.0,0.03523428604823043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486587647693473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028889230366645636,0.08569759510878758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037129346397924735,0.17976970946929427,0.0,0.0,0.09303957926135326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14921937277946756,0.10526584740647174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05838964582916315,0.0,0.052974772198071764,0.0,0.10615456829464187,0.06156537031031994,0.0,0.05586998011579106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049330196115433565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05515980737219468,0.0,0.0356204907421912,0.07995854090487557,0.0,0.0,0.11673798396382355,0.0,0.0,0.03644306388529183,0.04589913029940295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05034427508537686,0.0,0.05667568903661147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05591105302208847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909542828886772,0.0,0.0,0.04180307270952849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043483637350288415,0.0,0.0,0.053585032063104984,0.0,0.20234169645963904,0.2079588586376981,0.0,0.0372069122823558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042973265382298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04225104444028994,0.04594552813716609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476874612202816,0.2357778973532893,0.10329284143807306,0.0,0.091956027113081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427570919591613,0.05717736936857505,0.05134993307064409,0.0,0.0,0.0908013348454525,0.0,0.043372952835065176,0.031005144503231476,0.041724922822155536,0.0,0.0,0.047263689244837585,0.0,0.047433183148590435,0.0,0.0,0.05067232961201009,0.0,0.0,0.053383937162499326,0.0,0.037341806682250185,0.0,0.0,0.06770233795504324
mentalhealth,ljl2296,2020/01/05,"Am I have a psychotic break? For some context I’m a 21f with a history of childhood trauma, and have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety disorder. 
Several months ago I experienced the most stressful time of my life and spent nearly a week in a state of almost constant panic. From the moment I woke up my heart would be palpitating and I literally believed I was going to die. Anxiety attacks to the extreme to the point I had to be hospitalized, I lost nearly 15lbs in a span of one week because I just couldn’t get any food down. 
Now, after that stint I got some help and got on some medications (an off brand Zoloft and hydroxyzine as needed) and that really seemed to help level me off. I still have highs and lows but I’m much more regulated. 

However...after that stressful time and since coming back off Zoloft I’ve been having these weird hallucinations. I’m not even sure if that’s what to call them. 

Randomly, a few times throughout my days I’ll catch glimpses of dark figures. As if just out of eyesight and they always seem to be just moving away from my line of vision when I turn my head to check. Sometimes it’s a large mass in the corner of my ceiling and when I look directly at it, there’s nothing. No shadow, nothing. 

Sometimes it’s in the corner of my room or just in my peripheral. Sometimes it seems like a human shadow and sometimes it’s like tiny black bugs swarm a wall for a split second. Just now I thought I saw a black swirl peering around my shower curtain. 

It’s confusing and makes me wonder if somethings wrong with my brain but when I see these things I don’t feel immediate fear, more like “what the hell?”  

So these started after that long state of panic and have continued since being on and off of medication. Could that extreme amount of stress triggered something? Is it developing because of my age? Am I just imagining things? 

I have a therapist and I know I should really be asking her...I guess I just didn’t know if I could say it out loud yet. It’s a bit scary to think I’m losing control of my reality.",4.108684863523575,5.690688801488832,5.086451612903228,81.74967741935488,71.65508684863524,8.177667493796525,27.39205955334988,8.748949900417786,2.0416272952853602,1629,58,316,30,31,533,213,403,0.158,0.7959999999999999,0.045,-0.9919,2,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,2,3,19,20,2,7,22,0,25,10,3,3,1,67,55,29,1,10,15,0,1,3,0,2,6,2,3,1,22,23,1,1,11,0,2,4,5,16,0,2,12,9,38,4,54,33,10,62,1,4,5,0,8,30,1,17,28,214,60,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922596878773512,0.0,0.08949663112370049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436755755565677,0.0,0.0,0.06077838996965335,0.0,0.13674399233342635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956312427083259,0.08355400728393231,0.1016775090785137,0.08397120379921932,0.06872422589179755,0.0,0.10896492387545012,0.0,0.0,0.1006955580644373,0.0,0.0,0.09757487411303584,0.0,0.0,0.09977259188024372,0.0912623559865552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698906059564561,0.0,0.09658314067877803,0.10024219851603958,0.1427180935358369,0.0,0.0,0.05763978956922194,0.0,0.07697896838251593,0.09071422900099954,0.0927576357696632,0.0,0.10243204110827923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05903166040943862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057226080046414,0.04519092719414538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807318296619647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046694998505705465,0.0,0.050794143901305565,0.0,0.1429634689917587,0.0,0.09845716548203036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172502542595347,0.0,0.0,0.10591037195466343,0.11981299812293332,0.09443009973824414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823685086037777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312854337662561,0.13099303230861262,0.0,0.0,0.07909448569597792,0.07505289187134871,0.09998829870752796,0.09756389221090013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05965882568878299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800727829531769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133865398151701,0.09499198896181106,0.06570126012744916,0.06627078458864602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17151636354342722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06056313706186847,0.0,0.0,0.2097257332140985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448871557584534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145124398080582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710749675078364,0.0,0.0,0.07122068461734866,0.2440922358465197,0.0,0.10096885061086602,0.0,0.1478646382417638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376112191683103,0.3535785329309553,0.0,0.06326042346003387,0.0,0.07137537231559501,0.0,0.3071379248180309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423533045755241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377181876687136,0.11875419267545195,0.05726819758611144,0.0,0.07095414632722384,0.1563466801741157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721485543163724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433832350804989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692389357003124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348977538246559,0.09771805497857053,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tomhmcdonald55,2020/01/05,"My friend with depression has such low self esteem and thinks so little of them self. How can I help them realise how amazing they are? My friend is suicidal and just constantly says she is a nuisance, she is unlovable, she is damaged, she is not worth being around, she will never be happy. 

But she is also the most beautiful and amazing human. 

Ive told her so many times how incredible she is, how loved she is, and how we are lucky to have her. But it just doesn’t get through and no matter what she will tell herself the opposite? 

How can I make her realise and BELIEVE the truth?

Edit: she goes to therapy, I just want to know what to do in those days between sessions.",4.657234753550544,5.539615609022559,5.0785964912280726,84.97239766081874,69.6015037593985,8.01637426900585,29.063492063492063,8.167268648758528,1.860957226399332,528,19,106,7,9,168,83,133,0.14400000000000002,0.6559999999999999,0.19899999999999998,0.843,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,3,0,14,12,0,0,4,0,21,1,0,7,2,30,28,17,1,1,6,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,3,4,9,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,1,1,24,8,10,23,1,8,0,3,0,1,28,4,0,2,4,87,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16418207890140846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827646928540826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23130807029110065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22186142390477545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324045345546429,0.0,0.17682862056502086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31723577390280466,0.0,0.10726322197538056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21855065012389174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13761139976935408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283008327660145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20576922543619355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18529548987153865,0.0,0.1370424685175774,0.20814672228474668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15834362631093074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16326652233974276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.428355114306124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22456999827852567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794453400146364,0.0,0.2347837947466132,0.0,0.0,0.13155094948891508,0.0,0.0,0.1197148102744588,0.0,0.0,0.19617742045225145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210940198788294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,capicorncolumbine666,2020/01/05,"Honest question, thoughts on people with bpd? Why do u bail the second you find out we have it? I guess this is the best place to ask this since it’s about mental health? Idk. I realize there’s a huge stigma about people with bpd and I think most of them are mentally retarded",0.9053571428571416,3.3902059642857165,2.069285714285716,94.47571428571429,87.57142857142857,5.342857142857143,16.92857142857143,6.868970318607317,-0.02882857142857098,218,5,46,3,7,69,46,56,0.086,0.74,0.174,0.7383,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,1,1,1,3,2,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,12,8,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,6,2,8,7,2,4,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,3,0,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976596312381395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22188400052688245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5325803907487953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932442867451428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329153041792289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247414790317638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42614584166131503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29315954534071675,0.0,0.22090060355657648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368513327252547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17489807382133996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13547657598369306,0.0,0.16785275600483454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19078377232047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JollyMagician,2020/01/05,I just don’t want to exist I’m suicidal but I’m scared to die. Can anyone else relate to this. I’ve lost all my will to continue fighting but at the same time the thought of dying is too scary for me to follow through with. I have reached out for help but nothing has really helped. Hoping I can find some people who can relate with this feeling and give me some tips for how to handle it....,1.3287804878048777,3.326220597560976,2.797743902439024,93.26051829268292,80.82926829268294,5.5634146341463415,20.006097560975608,6.6274283507984215,0.1402634146341466,307,8,67,3,8,100,59,82,0.22699999999999998,0.648,0.125,-0.9201,0,0,0,0,2,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,1,2,0,8,0,0,1,1,18,17,5,3,2,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,1,6,1,15,14,4,5,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,3,2,46,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654519133713409,0.2424476548379892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4911534743923266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19766768777642185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196434165136105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162686254451682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22698980788269102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172060705146069,0.0,0.0,0.23501947579429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25830134757646617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22704561508736465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16404420791643629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158639557322715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23690034381724104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258826546451812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18785178816812395,0.1379764489468539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395660471187774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,andrew_wessel,2020/01/05,"I’m in a depressive state and don’t know what to do about it [Discussion] I have had a really tough week, mentally.

It started with hyping up a crush I have had for years. I’ve always known the possibility of acting on this crush was not an option, however going into the new year I wanted to speak to a couple friends about it. After some long individual discussions with these people, I came back to the realization that a relationship could never come from this crush and that I, and my friends, hyped it up to me for nothing. From here I began to spiral.

The initial thought of this crush caused me to have very bad anxiety even thinking about talking to this girl. I lost a lot of sleep over it. Then I lost even more sleep after I began to think of myself negatively and go down that rabbit hole of thinking.

I reopened many mental pathways for my negative thoughts to creep back in. And only a day after I had been so happy with the possibility of finally addressing this crush after almost 6 years, I fell into a depressive state.

Over the last few days, my eating habits have ranged between eating almost nothing to binge eating when I finally get myself to have something. My sleep schedule is completely off because of my racing thoughts, causing me to take hours to fall asleep and then sleeping well into the afternoon. I have begun to have small bouts of crying over small thoughts, such as “you’re a fucking fat loser who doesn’t deserve to be happy” or “you’ll never find someone to love you and you’re going to die alone so get used to this feeling.” Ive also been very angry at myself and others because of this, as I become jealous of people who don’t have to feel like this.

I feel as though I want to hit a reset button on my life, start with a clean slate. I hate my current position of being a graduate student, hate my interests as nothing is truly giving me pleasure anymore. I hate details about myself ranging from my fashion to the way I interact with people to the way a small piece of my body is formed like a finger.

On top of all of my personal issues, the problems around the world, including the bushfires raging in Australia and the possible war between Iran and America further pushed my depressive state into a darker place.

Today I was a little better but not much. Talking about it with friends only helps so much, as most of them just have general suggestions to fix my way of thinking that I’ve all heard before. And being with friends in person has distracted me a little bit I keep getting drawn back into this state.

I guess if you’ve read this far into my rant/story I’d like to thank you because I don’t know anyone who would’ve listened this long without trying to just stop me and say I’m overthinking things or I’m just not in the right headspace. If you have any sort of advice for me to help, other than “change up a few things in your life” or “go for the crush” or “only focus on things in your control” it would be greatly appreciated. Sorry for the long post",7.570506257110352,6.695552728668942,7.7344846416382245,74.40115813424345,63.5221843003413,10.13415244596132,33.867804323094425,9.21078282632365,2.9343009783845275,2393,84,437,34,30,780,273,586,0.105,0.8009999999999999,0.094,0.6798,2,1,1,1,0,0,42.0,0,6,1,6,24,33,7,1,35,0,34,15,8,4,4,81,81,32,2,7,14,0,4,3,4,2,3,6,2,3,32,28,4,3,15,1,0,10,12,17,1,0,17,10,57,16,105,56,13,92,0,6,0,2,32,38,1,14,39,318,89,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062254790581233274,0.0,0.0,0.1275888628944756,0.06598234919226252,0.0,0.05094732212231245,0.0530102194106666,0.0,0.0,0.043323673569716566,0.0,0.0487365006660358,0.0,0.06318128850602625,0.04454616519475968,0.0,0.0,0.056713690932211513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14696272459772178,0.05319357899134041,0.1165075480335879,0.07036056018113357,0.05421087690928577,0.0,0.0,0.056344612459317225,0.06955271432477965,0.07076530598107512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286506228819513,0.0,0.13089147818001734,0.06739469273552808,0.0548788628877841,0.06679670134408107,0.0,0.07145401990062611,0.05086571148006784,0.0704917698671499,0.06998032553784041,0.08217287194250986,0.0,0.16461500705774648,0.0,0.06611892047798634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955677870311444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415716135731216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663814617578037,0.045513059331438975,0.0,0.1395781575932513,0.058228023594394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19688279341928375,0.0588970859407246,0.0998545144224618,0.06111458775804405,0.1448270617719308,0.0,0.0,0.0702383742354911,0.07018162376582905,0.0,0.0,0.13563685447775387,0.0,0.18869559458691784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540435544078681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273961785813574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649467524036537,0.0,0.056626661559348465,0.0,0.0,0.07002458046876445,0.051930581643352944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999779058136244,0.09337363780908388,0.1277044496123328,0.0,0.16913891670220765,0.0,0.0,0.13908977254733149,0.05416232455073005,0.057499022265188174,0.0,0.0,0.06458998558126754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840550445681742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093665526457738,0.0,0.0982711851337004,0.06152965288062935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338883976024456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453585785437601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250146648992814,0.11125486218586428,0.06656137561713199,0.0,0.0,0.2154638364339386,0.06101472239163212,0.0,0.0,0.06096002089428191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372531226028498,0.0,0.04081302223037832,0.0,0.0,0.06839862719527484,0.0,0.05440634535136589,0.0,0.05066321587039693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550163246355573,0.0,0.053979642623776136,0.04904558628284935,0.0,0.07131597069273754,0.09018580246146583,0.0,0.0,0.05326280080986035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04790054153995048,0.10241227003106047,0.0,0.05865383320329196,0.0,0.0,0.12697443649976592,0.1632862403486186,0.06259285722854227,0.20230837147436084,0.0,0.0,0.06038780302044516,0.0,0.0,0.043253598947216435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05502331922536853,0.0,0.10513166281762723,0.07515334291213564,0.151705506444698,0.05110277250762206,0.0,0.05728120771602421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06141230793314405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051277288055656,0.0,0.0,0.12307772875623185
mentalhealth,bb234nl,2020/01/05,"I just want to feel again. (TW: self harm) I've been clean from self harm for so long but lately, I can't keep my mind off it.

I know it won't help like it did. I don't feel it like I used to.

I want to feel it like I did again though. 

I want to feel the pain and know that it's for me, because I'm useless and I will never be anything more.

I want to look at it and see that I deserve to be covered in scars and mutilated.

I want to touch each and every scar to remind myself that I don't deserve anything.

I never did.",-0.3868754774637111,0.9813898235294118,2.0156455309396506,99.87975553857908,83.53781512605042,4.66340718105424,17.54087089381207,4.851557810540192,-0.916956302521008,395,8,105,1,11,135,61,119,0.185,0.7390000000000001,0.076,-0.9475,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,1,0,11,1,0,1,2,24,27,8,0,5,2,0,5,3,0,2,1,0,1,2,10,6,0,1,6,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,4,7,17,3,14,19,2,9,0,1,2,0,3,3,0,0,9,68,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26982022669283146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999373853252253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812801748440695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315755524680746,0.2342400758322329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098867170693246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457189836569112,0.0,0.0,0.18019622587525452,0.0,0.18493346473642264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402810129929332,0.0,0.0,0.14508331328959614,0.13766980250071706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16553445975664174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25288400951263396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17444560899148825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13064037028770725,0.0,0.342054054604841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610719630710695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415930576544258,0.0,0.0,0.4834855369364343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DerekZurPhoto,2020/01/05,Paranoia Why am I always paranoid? I always feel like someone is in my house and is here to harm me.  I have trouble sleeping sometimes. Even when I know I’m 100% safe I’m paranoid.,-0.8382239382239369,1.008602243243249,1.1416988416988438,96.29162162162164,107.64864864864865,2.1142857142857143,24.204633204633204,3.1291,-0.012039382239382057,141,7,28,0,7,46,28,37,0.293,0.5770000000000001,0.13,-0.7003,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,0,4,8,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,2,2,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5440763086902901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21593910669574676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653094014529191,0.2335641843548832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37724192950919533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17967627602087138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597251270696436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3271735669697116,0.0,0.2770130460661288,0.0,0.3233495043944895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950102027568916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,peachyjung,2020/01/05,"I was at my worst, now feeling better TW: Suicide


a year ago today, i recall losing all of the straws and was considering to end it all. didn't know who or what happened if i really did it back  then. kind of proud that i am now in a better place, not really feeling as bad as i did before although there are shitty days that make me feel like shit. 

here's to everyone for better days!",4.173625000000001,4.3259341125000015,5.695000000000004,82.73000000000002,70.375,8.4,24.75,8.238735603445708,1.3274499999999998,299,7,63,4,5,102,60,80,0.23,0.595,0.174,-0.8573,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,5,5,10,1,0,3,0,7,1,1,1,2,11,13,7,1,1,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,3,7,6,9,8,3,13,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,2,11,46,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17248606458378948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962229489932888,0.16246865423281207,0.0,0.0,0.16557577781457616,0.0,0.0,0.5162784794584807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509798395238297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17234275827624818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18593236881545455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29516099225601616,0.1390101143749096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17206907988907047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026282225387757,0.10693771285656008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506341155783424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21768857373896608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988564505053415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032977913022288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493096694254345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997366249545904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21284218973086028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18444190586245493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530505458382066
mentalhealth,meowy_face,2020/01/05,Need a chat Is there anyone who can message me for a few minutes. I’m kind of freaking out.,-1.3761666666666663,0.6345750499999987,1.1700000000000017,98.54833333333332,98.5,2.666666666666667,21.66666666666667,3.1291,-0.4308333333333332,71,3,16,0,3,24,19,20,0.162,0.838,0.0,-0.4754,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,11,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4798757012029223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7146740282344877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.50888146435304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CybermanFord,2020/01/05,"Something huge is going to happen. Let’s start from the beginning. When I was a child, I was blind to the world. I was a kid after all. Ever since my pre-teen years to now, I have grown a lot since then. My knowledge of the world, my mind, grew such amazing lengths since then. Since childhood, I always changed. My mind always grew and developed. I went through many different phases and dreams. Since childhood, I struggled with this existence. My consciousness was adapting to its own creation. I developed mentally to figure out what I wanted to be, what I wanted to do with my existence. what my life was. I could tell many stories about this development, like how I wanted to be many different things when I would grow up, shit like that. My mind grew and changed. My life, everything in the universe has led to this moment. Everything piece fell into place. I think now, this development is over, for the most part at least. For my mind, my knowledge, this, now, the present, is at the height of itself. 

Anyways. Let’s talk about the current day. I was thinking about writing this, this part of my mind, for a while now. Something big is going to happen soon. I’ve had this on my mind for a long time. I’m not sure what the future will bring. I’m not sure what is gonna happen, but something huge is on our way, something that will change life, maybe the universe, existence as we know it. I have many theories about this hypothetical event. I’ve been thinking about this forever. One theory is that something catastrophic will happen. Maybe WW3 will happen, who knows? It could happen tomorrow for all we know. Another theory is that maybe the afterlife does exist. I’m an agnostic, so I don’t follow religion is general, however, it doesn’t necessarily mean that the afterlife doesn’t exist. What lies after death is all speculation. Maybe there is an afterlife, and there’s something huge, maybe even mentally incomprehensible to the human mind, that will happen after our death in the universe. You could go full philosophical here. Maybe the universe is an illusion. If you ever heard of the simulation theory, maybe it is true. Maybe, after death, we still experience consciousness. If the universe is a creation by a society or god(s), maybe they will explain the universe to us after we die. Not sure. I don’t know. Maybe something great and amazing and game-changing will happen in the future. It’s all speculation at this point. I don’t know what will happen, but something is going to happen someday, I can feel it. Something will happen that will be huge. Maybe my life has been preparing for this moment. Maybe my brain, my consciousness, is only a small part of reality. Again, if there is a god, or creators, or simulators, or whatever, maybe there’s a world outside of our own. Maybe life is a video game, or a movie, with a plot and a story, not sure. Maybe there’s a point to my existence. After all, again, if you want to go the philosophical route, how do I know if you all exist or not? Maybe you’re all NPCs and shit like that. Maybe my life has led up to this point for a reason. My life has been dropping me hints of this reason. Maybe it’ll all make sense in the end.

I’ve had a fantasy for a long time. This fantasy has been something I’ve had on my mind for over a year or so. The fantasy starts from now, the present, to my eventual death. There are many forms and different directions it takes, but it follows the same storyline basically. I start off like I do now, but something happens. Some event, maybe a failed suicide attempt, or whatever big event, happens, and I change. My whole life, I have felt powerlessness. All the thoughts I have held in my head, all the beliefs and feelings, I’ve hid away from people. There’s a lot on my mind that I just started sharing to the internet, like I am now, but still, my mind is very vague to people. I’m trying to give more of my thoughts to other people out there, but I don’t know if I can. I feel so powerless, like I won’t be able to change things. I’ve been trying to get my thoughts out there, to wake people up to the truth that has haunted me for years. The next part of my fantasy is me starting my plan. My plan to wake people up and that kind of shit. I start with my parents. My parents are blind to the truth, they don’t know what I know. I later wake them up, and then, I enter adulthood. It’s always been my dream, a huge part of this fantasy, that over the years and in my life, I grow in supporters and popularity, I later become an important person in the world, a huge political and philosophical figure, I grow in support, and I wake everyone up to reality. How I do this, I don’t know, but I eventually gain power and after many years, and waking the world up, we start a revolution, against the governments, the Elite, those in power. We eventually overthrow and destroy the governments, taking the corrupt out of power. We eventually win the battle, and create our own society, our own government(s) and system, and create it in our view. We later celebrate in peace, and go on as a species to colonize space or do whatever. I die, after knowing I have just saved the world from destruction. 

So yeah, that’s the fantasy I’ve had. I really do wish it happens, I really do. This has been my dream forever to wake people up and save humanity. I don’t care about the power, or the money, or whatever, I want to help people. I’ve never been a misanthrope, I’ve always loved humanity. I’ve always wanted humanity to grow and develop as a species, not kill itself off and die. The human race is so amazing, our societies, our cultures, etc. All the achievements and memories that we have made as a species. Ever since I was a kid, I was fascinated with the many aspects of human life, like how are we so smart? How did we develop so many things in just a couple hundred-thousand years?! It’s insane how we grew and developed. I don’t want humanity to die. The thought of us going extinct is honestly depressing. Even the little things in life are amazing, and for all that to be wiped out of existence like the snap of a finger, (Thanos lol) is pretty sad. However, I have doubts. I know it’s all just a fantasy. I feel so powerless in life. Everyone has more control than me. How am I gonna change things? My parents and family probably wont listen, and if they do, they’re obviously not gonna wake up to the truth, they’re not gonna agree with my thoughts and beliefs. If I can’t change my family’s mind, how am I gonna wake up the whole world, much less start a fucking revolution?! I don’t know. I really hope in the future my life and mind will make sense. Who knows? Thanks for listening to me, sorry for the long post, but I needed to get this out of my head. It’s a great feeling to get something off your chest. Thanks!",3.1997435251891453,5.268330156344415,4.411097683786505,83.59267268314099,75.2311178247734,7.879970046737418,25.742221189351106,8.69343788997812,1.9244996849743068,5333,191,1047,111,117,1749,373,1324,0.09699999999999999,0.757,0.146,0.9963,16,0,12,0,0,1,228.0,22,5,4,13,57,50,8,2,90,2,113,34,17,16,26,216,216,87,10,22,39,3,7,8,0,20,15,3,0,11,69,59,0,2,41,12,1,24,23,13,0,1,31,13,137,37,148,155,38,170,3,3,3,2,60,72,4,25,78,720,206,4,0.02615823878538048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088287508112766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027429194145326925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02457652641543031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028889719590006593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02920124553345458,0.0,0.0,0.02667006779692236,0.0,0.2213755854099788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029338689077995087,0.06265567546459228,0.028943593678370117,0.0,0.016869899999468595,0.0,0.022530052735805432,0.0,0.10859248802371868,0.08198937610020597,0.0,0.0,0.022891251038346917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023168435387232345,0.0,0.02917335086384471,0.034554540027036465,0.07098487370642939,0.0,0.049990636292254316,0.04701867665465246,0.025587776904591682,0.04931931900644524,0.0,0.06613195748511035,0.0,0.025116011393594637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024182870248840038,0.0409998003716109,0.025093366207481742,0.10406430943006764,0.0,0.0,0.05767910121515439,0.0,0.0,0.3238430183660241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053691799291745314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017533316065831774,0.0,0.0,0.02598103336447741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028940215550514164,0.027239780356737832,0.20126237515161666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05349714286590364,0.24019238938682594,0.10223675333487324,0.026217427278852738,0.0,0.06944765451987536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04447759837571868,0.023608831789634424,0.024751558018480863,0.03492165502258903,0.21216278744360914,0.4993098685573318,0.028493990587752226,0.0,0.0,0.052722704424480786,0.0,0.3169483715709389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01922931531278493,0.019396002609519486,0.02017484635555449,0.0,0.027819583707001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017725499581514568,0.01989451933166575,0.0,0.0,0.08713688565694025,0.14163411751403074,0.0,0.12694380401051106,0.02284036513708912,0.02732979203340199,0.0,0.07418397222649484,0.0,0.025052361951333604,0.026612332901328088,0.028203005668043405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050272912757699684,0.05379005223977742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805531686276031,0.1298301926102865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24165468231486684,0.0,0.0292820067136811,0.14811948838406758,0.0,0.04178000656795878,0.0,0.0,0.02734627074102826,0.0,0.028612867577251087,0.059368118768991264,0.09861532194072392,0.0,0.039335480267244725,0.021025001479214395,0.022863453669468032,0.04816598360672186,0.0,0.0,0.08689185760066713,0.05028342957084896,0.0,0.10383359845982916,0.03050615878947866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03551945412676662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293028095964183,0.0,0.0,0.021583286510322392,0.10800164880550278,0.02076319238204154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024248949422227755,0.0,0.058409478878630634,0.030080683654738562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01858206231659869,0.0,0.0,0.10107028887742844
mentalhealth,whraspberry,2020/01/05,"I can't stop crying. I've been crying all day and now it's 2 in the morning and I can't sleep because I can't stop crying.

My boyfriend (19m) and I (20f) have been dating for 2 years.

He's from out of the country and is staying for two years. He got here a year and a half ago and now we have less than six months together before he has to go back.

We aren't sure how long he'll be gone this time. It could even be years. 

He wanted to break up with me after he left but after some conversation, we decided that breaking up wouldn't do either of us good.

I just don't know what I'm going to do when he leaves. I've never lived alone. I only very recently got out of my abusive family. I don't have any friends. I have no one other than my boyfriend and once he leaves the country, I'll have no one within 36 hours of travel that I can talk to, other than my parrot who gives me bad anxiety.

I'm just so broken and I don't know what to do with it all. I don't want to lose him and it's going to be so hard to go back to long distance.

It doesn't help that I have very bad mental health. I don't work right now because of it. I won't be able to afford our apartment when he leaves and I don't think he seems to think it'll be a problem.

He has a nice, loving family. He has friends.

I'm going to be stuck here alone (for months at least). I have no idea how to take on the world. My abusive parents didn't teach me how to live. They taught me how to live under someone who tells me what to do... and now I'm fucked and alone.

I don't even know why I'm posting this. I just need help and I have no idea where to go for it. I'm so hopeless and I don't know how I'm going to survive living on my own with no help and trying to stay alive through my mental shit. I just don't know if it can be done.",0.2066475095785449,1.5469113916256167,2.352175697865352,98.28559250136836,81.63546798029556,5.2007662835249056,17.928024083196497,5.648184324379264,-0.6443801860974272,1379,27,354,7,36,466,169,406,0.2,0.722,0.079,-0.9955,2,3,0,0,0,1,41.0,5,0,1,3,25,13,2,0,8,0,47,5,2,5,4,59,82,27,0,7,7,1,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,21,23,0,2,11,1,0,9,23,7,0,5,9,1,40,6,48,61,7,56,0,2,0,2,32,15,2,3,27,223,61,3,0.07848601728493854,0.18598619270825933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957311874779712,0.0,0.0,0.24386353128855665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05337318315397147,0.0,0.060041588397301726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207018052787929,0.1310650921395831,0.09568869531204743,0.0,0.06678581994116069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06266469833667182,0.0,0.2586396137041713,0.050616988162577405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031844544566191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367854839488716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14797926403916173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127620452271945,0.07255905827309228,0.0,0.07529093950309923,0.3122378863380607,0.06583034755473814,0.12554487571378786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030805526241836,0.0,0.0,0.08342696620225973,0.0,0.0,0.15782256891556398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729291722143232,0.0,0.0,0.17720232032767486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156693125656282,0.0,0.0,0.2493160794554495,0.08527528742707292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772183647723813,0.1389153109724826,0.0,0.08780577739613553,0.0,0.0,0.07083669489836038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581908906298837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252935803931109,0.0,0.0,0.05819638732406796,0.060533255039631965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358504690195799,0.10636831309273392,0.0596921528605868,0.0,0.0,0.08714943400099467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751679090199232,0.0,0.0,0.07510051877352197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749547344520037,0.0,0.0,0.06702662992102483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145072240755071,0.0,0.0,0.08056476886861462,0.0,0.0,0.07854269894797436,0.0,0.06650094774877552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16731130305770786,0.0,0.13123564964284604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739721424471932,0.0,0.059011717292904574,0.06308408769613873,0.06860023851828136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058134149942127,0.0,0.0,0.045765827846679256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053286853778990714,0.0,0.07666943442303073,0.0,0.09440901506535897,0.0,0.0,0.12951836796150756,0.0925861729944911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082142288059742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571387553473896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20216968746537625
mentalhealth,d0rian-grey,2020/01/05,"If you love it let it go? Hey 
I'm 19, a young Male and having a breakdown, as short as I can put it I'm on the edge of a ward or doing something stupid and it's a shitty situation but it's the one I'm in. I have a girlfriend and she has noticed me being ""distant"", she doesn't really know and is saying she cares, but every other ex who ""cares"" abandoned me when I let them in, i guess I'm curious as what people think. Let them in? let them go? Lie? 

Any female users, what would you prefer your significant other to do? 

Male users, what would you do ?

I'm just in a confusing situation and dont know what to do. 

For a little more context, they go to my school and we are back from the holidays in 8 days. 

Any thoughts?",0.12665322580645366,2.0090125806451624,2.728770161290324,92.75315524193552,84.48387096774194,5.681451612903228,18.719758064516128,6.9077264865688965,0.06862096774193605,550,14,129,7,16,191,90,155,0.071,0.823,0.106,0.7399,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,1,4,4,0,3,6,1,1,10,0,19,1,0,0,0,22,35,14,0,4,5,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,12,7,0,1,5,1,0,4,2,3,0,1,1,1,19,3,15,27,1,16,0,1,0,1,20,8,0,4,4,90,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19839476347261087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216590754912374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974507112627583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940748218561446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095989727459374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290273227435253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487058024272657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069351349833505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16033393448288116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5966525213642208,0.0,0.0,0.14620121049100404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165440488156446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607526708681206,0.0,0.0,0.0988460640249602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011286860740672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664079208623773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934487916747002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600259051433645,0.0,0.14762938791937832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3279305607939177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229873517423747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346834064107508,0.0,0.11580539633428268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20724535441334746,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heckingkeerax,2020/01/05,"I feel awful My boyfriend left for bootcamp a month ago. I love him more than anything, but I've been alright. He sent letter today saying that he hasn't got any of my letters and he's worried. I think my letters have been lost or something. I feel like I've abandoned him. I really don't know what to do. He sent a letter with a different address than the last one so I'll try to send it there. If he doesn't get it I don't know what I'll do. I just feel awful that he's been there for a whole month without anything from me and that so many of my letters are gone. I don't know what to do at this point. I just feel like I can't ever take back the lost time",0.2889795918367355,1.9408388163265329,2.151258503401362,98.34076530612244,82.60544217687075,4.74421768707483,20.02380952380953,5.288315135182226,-0.4237537414965988,514,14,126,2,14,170,78,147,0.132,0.7859999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.7964,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,8,7,0,0,6,3,14,1,0,0,1,19,31,7,0,1,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,9,3,0,1,8,0,0,4,7,3,0,1,9,5,17,4,13,22,2,15,0,3,0,1,18,3,0,2,10,75,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14563384618744135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172335071188297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703945943429297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263294535367857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17164887691186767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861039843195925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33228137898536503,0.23473870383934575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583514135778507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13139832918516486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708697157077932,0.1339188971654499,0.0,0.0,0.17850239167462087,0.0,0.0,0.16052833358189084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3586855443764533,0.0,0.14827882542754586,0.0,0.0,0.1665650443967794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622706347460079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132767099545396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15530787186349904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052488678947976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13065060666593012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264790537286966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352620543927753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052708853713492,0.0,0.0,0.09579926346876956,0.0,0.15572843066312114,0.0,0.0,0.1115426418527188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834247666113028,0.0,0.1583704301113746,0.0,0.0,0.1668452418548325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YoureWelcomeM8,2020/01/05,"Can’t make sense of my own problems, or the cause/disorder behind them. I have been struggling with a lot of different irrational thoughts and fears for a long time and I’m not sure exactly they might be the result of. For a long time I’ve been living with an irrational fear of how people perceive me, and am scared of the idea of being something people don’t like/want. I have extreme trouble interacting with other people and have an unshakable idea that nobody I know or am friends with like me, or if they do it is merely circumstantial or something I did to make them like me. The few friends I have I am very dependent on, while simultaneously unable to adequately interact with them out of fear of provoking or annoying them. I am very dependent on seeking praise, while simultaneously being completely incapable of accepting it as honest, and usually only seek it for the positive attention. I have absolutely 0 self confidence or positive self image whatsoever, and regularly psych myself into a state of unbearable depression when alone with my thoughts for too long. I feel like a loser on every metric imaginable, mentally, physically, and emotionally, and can only see myself for my flaws. Despite seeing that my mental image of myself is worse than how others perceive me, and having at least some self awareness at how ridiculous and hollow I act, I can’t shake any of it.

I don’t even know what to call this or where it even came from. I have so many problems I don’t even know where to begin, they all feed into each other. I can’t make sense of how to even unravel the mess I have tied myself into mentally, and I can’t trust my own take on any of it because of how much depression has warped how I perceive the world. I feel like I’ve been like this for so long that I have lost all concept of myself and my personality, and have been robbed of some of the most important formative years of my life which I can never take back. This has been something I’ve struggled with since at least 9 and has gone completely unchecked for the past 10 years since. 

What do I even do anymore?",9.451336111111113,7.548442972500002,9.331166666666665,67.74294444444448,60.525,12.888888888888893,38.22222222222222,11.645159339076185,4.3573805555555545,1679,64,305,40,18,551,179,400,0.151,0.745,0.10400000000000001,-0.9415,1,1,3,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,7,3,18,29,2,7,16,0,41,2,0,13,5,76,60,34,0,3,9,0,2,5,2,1,1,0,0,4,18,27,1,0,15,0,0,4,9,17,0,0,11,4,45,12,53,45,13,35,1,4,2,0,17,14,0,15,21,230,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550764123809139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228776125933744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818776993645926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634838260237231,0.0,0.050328033384388654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430336544041085,0.09442706543799137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17312594790387972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14221824612402334,0.0,0.0,0.08625801136603037,0.09462133319931623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286930047739424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726517185675268,0.0,0.06956066994000057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27871009784183864,0.08349000436500438,0.11796228526573943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757186938430154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18640120996862464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361190555778162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583148287644966,0.2420089499878219,0.0,0.07290231657737664,0.2922533068478617,0.0,0.0,0.0901243932389393,0.0701898715792918,0.0,0.0,0.16532905805745954,0.08370325370749565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496042943870486,0.0875835024087084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06069136921290773,0.0,0.06367564466346624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255817587294623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881321213724611,0.17171088933387618,0.07208852790359388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579982422664656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826573300718242,0.0,0.1315798466368132,0.0,0.2583854053725083,0.0,0.0,0.1365895773635954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19067701199751425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726200425905351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781216877200696,0.0,0.12415024233749725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310874185237462,0.09628322778236756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092858013528857,0.136241898280697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413606723362005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633233891305698
mentalhealth,eco-1,2020/01/05,"I want to stop I reached 4000 cuts today, I want to stop and I'm desperate right now, I don't know what to do.",0.2869230769230775,0.9196930769230748,2.6415384615384627,99.27846153846157,79.76923076923076,6.7384615384615385,20.69230769230769,7.1686216300943375,0.0220615384615388,84,2,24,1,2,29,17,26,0.344,0.502,0.154,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,6,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22220140308582892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3452835045327613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.676052265818927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3832441257223667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4769518968875767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,teamnosleep143,2020/01/05,"Please help What is it called when someone feels what others feel. For example, when someone else is mad they get mad, or when someone’s frustrated they are too. It’s caused major problems for my family and I was wondering if was an emotional issue or what???",4.496224489795917,6.503281428571434,5.0813775510204096,80.45022959183675,71.44897959183673,8.981632653061224,28.5765306122449,9.516144504307137,2.7960571428571432,206,8,37,5,4,66,35,49,0.222,0.665,0.113,-0.8146,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,2,0,4,4,3,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,9,9,7,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,4,0,2,7,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,4,3,26,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24380069975361499,0.0,0.0,0.24527233452453065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19945337962480714,0.26857291311841497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22508172025083786,0.0,0.24144850422381006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474226845910195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600358245531871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24920345398230495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620868298620205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284611167251271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6069018310691527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589250827438612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imannoyingandimsorry,2020/01/05,"Can anyone tell me what the point is? I just don’t fucking get it. I hate every singe day that I’m alive. No one actually cares about me, I can tell that even my mom wants to get rid of me because I’ve been home too long (winter break).

I don’t have enough money to even pay rent, and I have over 40k out in loans that I’ll never be able to pay off. 

I’m not happy. I haven’t been happy since I was a young kid, and even then was questionable. 

I just don’t get it. Why am I forced to be alive if I’m miserable the entire time?",1.0922035480859016,1.8245286218487424,3.0523809523809526,96.7287301587302,77.90756302521008,6.2972922502334265,17.423902894491135,6.42735559955562,-0.5442444444444448,402,5,106,3,9,136,74,119,0.198,0.7340000000000001,0.068,-0.9263,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,2,1,3,0,16,1,0,0,1,10,26,4,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,6,3,0,0,1,1,5,0,7,3,0,1,4,0,13,3,10,20,1,13,0,1,0,1,5,5,1,2,7,63,19,2,0.1813789196320444,0.0,0.17699966133716738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682435787666468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056690590942772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18492789683618585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169743980590295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874129096213183,0.0,0.35939719737490033,0.0,0.15281956259865534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16768188849885196,0.2842889981067245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3861624653512343,0.0,0.17907413214292814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819378451240967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051463621261838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124287985201795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989060447594415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290705006600865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17146170590016027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031859005036988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003851663766538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170663407158047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576350664807868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698198616474434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16366626328167586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw0OO0away,2020/01/05,"[Vent] Witnessing mental illness is scary I guess I’m just venting because I’ve witnessed mental illness way too many times. This is a long post so be warned. I’ve also witnessed friends go through mental illness as well. Though, this is what has happened within my family. 

My brother had depression during his high school days and had to spend an extra 2 years to graduate. He slept all day in his room so I never saw him. When I did, he was yelling and arguing with my parents. I was about 5 when this happened. A few years ago, he was in an abusive relationship due to his poor anger management as well. He’s moved in and out of my parent’s house because of his depression and failure to support himself. 

My sister also had major depression during high school. She self harmed and tried to kill herself. There was constant arguing and intensity within the house. I was in middle school when this went down. She’s doing better now but is in EMDR and getting herself sorted out. 

My mother also had a depressive episode because her mom died from cancer (which is understandably hard to deal with). My parents were at risk of divorce but never did. I was roughly age 10 when this happened. Not to mention, I ALSO have anxiety from 14 surgeries in childhood. So, there’s a lot of mental health problems in my family.

This is stuff that I’ve never talked about with anyone. It’s just too much to think about. Fuck, I haven’t even told everything in this post. Even my therapist doesn’t extensively know this. Though, I plan on talking about this one day but it keeps being put on the back burner. 

Many of my friends are going through mental illness at this moment. I don’t ever want to bear witness to another person with mental illness. I’m sorry if I sound shitty because that’s the exact opposite of what should be said and enforces the stigma. However, there’s just something about it that just makes it scary as fuck as a witness. 

TL;DR: mental illness is scary as fuck to witness as a child and into early teens.",3.5773958333333336,5.986016114583336,4.303333333333335,83.20833333333336,75.35416666666666,6.454166666666668,27.333333333333336,7.492282038375204,1.7354458333333342,1604,64,281,21,36,512,193,384,0.233,0.733,0.034,-0.9978,4,0,1,0,2,0,44.0,0,0,0,2,34,20,7,1,12,0,31,12,1,1,6,42,55,32,2,4,9,7,2,0,2,1,8,3,1,3,21,16,0,1,3,0,2,5,7,14,2,1,18,6,32,6,54,33,6,54,0,4,1,3,37,22,3,4,24,202,53,5,0.0,0.08412386084343151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293756837276565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22711596858356936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445010730846018,0.05431510967135249,0.0,0.0,0.049645128700791484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05459492300458938,0.0,0.1731247330031015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279408171072118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672620623186464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13736814781240006,0.07319829209835042,0.24461015295730104,0.0,0.07368720298000364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379018571880413,0.06422392429419987,0.0,0.0,0.06381057904752645,0.0,0.13386571158291186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970946180819073,0.1969161699224887,0.03709477720610708,0.0,0.08070232408996224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821494238734114,0.0,0.1883562508047685,0.0,0.0636024101675728,0.0,0.0,0.07547010230374908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003163608250836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384985179844844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310841547682143,0.07855142013469701,0.0,0.039019961588070605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283311744330461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603619988678924,0.0,0.0,0.04739331658899147,0.14396651801316038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5008619077247826,0.0,0.0,0.08315480731662556,0.0,0.07546218609414491,0.052193461496533186,0.0,0.16427965052250273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04811170678029763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365126169333512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061994808393246364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359975087656693,0.0,0.0,0.06793779149491366,0.0,0.07137500982438841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622785564640105,0.0,0.0,0.06753763685105812,0.0,0.0,0.2155685780853671,0.0,0.0,0.07406889909539204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054659574681060606,0.0,0.07947913199673863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127846832223917,0.0,0.08057040957227375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141348599594003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243693373197718,0.0,0.04549418778100095,0.13951505990584345,0.0,0.041400902691713815,0.0,0.0,0.0678439223671217,0.0,0.0482046092434369,0.0,0.0,0.07391391765279871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04187787394106145,0.056356810656522885,0.0,0.0,0.12767576812799694,0.06581807970869069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144385616719
mentalhealth,JohnSmith1029384757,2020/01/05,"How do I finally just get rid of my anxiety and depression? Every time my life seems to be even remotely suitable, it just comes back to bite me in the ass and make everything worse. It’s been back 3 times now. Three major swings of being inches away from possible permanent injury or death. I can feel it coming back again, and I’m afraid this bout might be my last, as my feelings of self loathing are now justified by my actually deplorable actions. How do I win? How do I get rid of depression and anxiety for good? I’m so tired of my life being a dreadful, confusion filled mess with no rhyme, reason or purpose to it and I’m so tired or not truly loving anyone. I’m so confused and tired and the light has been steadily fading for 4 years now.

I don’t know what to do.",3.381666666666668,4.745577522292997,4.694665605095544,84.7070090233546,73.14012738853503,8.290658174097665,26.459129511677283,8.841846274778883,1.9228518046709129,609,21,125,12,12,202,98,157,0.301,0.648,0.05,-0.9922,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,16,10,0,4,3,0,15,7,1,5,0,28,29,17,1,0,6,0,2,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,6,10,0,0,5,0,0,4,3,7,0,1,2,3,12,3,17,22,1,20,0,2,0,2,2,3,1,7,13,82,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.1435879455923397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22512422672276586,0.0,0.0,0.10288408950053744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382433845882241,0.3394259875041621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534970997547823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534638697512117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718494154706088,0.0,0.12397225437658592,0.0,0.13224043320290887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14879736017448295,0.0,0.0,0.16118527369706687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374972239783,0.0,0.0,0.12341450720861805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086459488361818,0.1199391818858116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20785943527441436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280008564285864,0.0,0.09821745563510577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560928646772696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587885500266192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15128498537806928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13395122497713374,0.15349967747419896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17159766887136366,0.5073492299807194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994878482810364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947536860955852
mentalhealth,DegenerateDrugUse,2020/01/05,"My friend developed schizophrenia and thinks ive been blackmailing him for his social security check Long story short I was in the hospital a while unable to walk and during those 3 long months he went into a schizophrenic down spiral was 5150'd had meltdowns, panic attacks. 

I called him a week or so after I got out and learned of whats been happening. Consistently been telling him not to wire me any money but hes convinced I live in his attic. I learned he was trying to acquire a firearm to shoot me to make all of this end. He also threatened to cut my brother into pieces witha pair of scissors. Any thoughts on this?",3.7280454545454553,6.084405350000001,4.10287878787879,85.07727272727277,74.66666666666666,6.696969696969697,27.57575757575757,7.686295010490155,1.732416666666667,502,20,92,7,11,157,84,120,0.115,0.8240000000000001,0.061,-0.7579,0,0,0,2,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,1,2,6,2,1,5,0,9,1,0,1,1,15,15,8,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,4,0,2,2,1,3,0,0,10,0,16,3,18,5,2,17,0,0,0,0,14,8,0,1,7,61,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18439509510174248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31360521319906953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623185389415431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354484103684152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20422583053773935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781458764863427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18441624233228587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039015221857052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20360675354593102,0.4081128681089244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15391423463733142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840471078814256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705364658013236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350477215890235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20153746839466746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14774663595470486,0.0,0.18305511381115253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654898352099286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18495772111207434,0.0,0.0,0.2137503785927292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JasonOrefice,2020/01/05,"What Should I D9 I'm in need of some advice, I've been feeling down  to say the least for almost a year now, and nothing has changed, I'm pretty sure I'm depressed but am afraid to go see anyone because recieving a diagnosis could potentially bar me from the career field I want to go Into,but I dont want to feel like this anymore, I don't know what to do",8.59177489177489,4.504082896103896,9.131688311688317,75.30800865800869,64.1948051948052,11.825108225108226,37.354978354978364,8.841846274778883,3.0108822510822515,281,9,63,3,3,96,56,77,0.031,0.8109999999999999,0.159,0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,4,0,8,1,0,0,1,13,20,2,0,5,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,1,0,3,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,4,5,2,10,17,2,6,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,2,3,35,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335474422001251,0.0,0.0,0.2393233701697637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370231782602565,0.16711393362547972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145691812556163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528296691594801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908215689258214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058498282469612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28010551034313275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416905499437331,0.17074121516303614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716577272399516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13134781682605728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676303181186408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17721502264847952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293263648423806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24314830600832602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19006191121508365,0.0,0.0,0.19045157403592966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252541008454401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819360702372869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390777413512954
mentalhealth,RougeDoodles,2020/01/05,"So I have social anxiety... I've been diagnosed with it for like a year now, it's probably because after I got out of highschool I went deep down into my depression and ended up wasting the last two years of my life with close to none social interaction...
But now I'm doing better! I've been working a lot with my psychiatrist and now I'm looking forward to what's to come!
The thing is I have to move to another city to start my studies and I'm going to start living with some friends (the ones that were with me during my most depressing era), and I've noticed that I get really exhausted every time we hang out,so much as to have a talk gets me tired, the thing is I'm kind of scared that just being in the same apartment as them is going to get me tired...",4.266645569620252,4.543488702531646,5.658075949367093,82.63850632911394,70.20253164556962,8.851645569620256,27.8253164556962,8.841846274778883,1.9434055696202528,597,19,126,10,10,202,93,158,0.11900000000000001,0.828,0.054000000000000006,-0.8824,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,1,2,5,8,0,1,8,0,11,5,0,0,0,20,26,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,5,0,0,0,8,14,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,4,0,2,5,1,15,4,26,20,6,27,0,2,1,0,7,9,0,3,14,86,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999969954323284,0.11672785362240305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301499442181113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494989557478987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13143930702011647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628441542484182,0.15487155323765442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351458843888611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856026535011789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788754617661645,0.0,0.2391596233572863,0.0,0.1734362524601393,0.0,0.12203694361307395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15889481293580898,0.0,0.12437793542317148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077759870092808,0.0745458002210493,0.0,0.1347362118839559,0.0,0.12813378967224015,0.0,0.0,0.12972313985629766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621747441130509,0.11216824877051104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17372014445628187,0.0,0.0,0.10339620596470236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16451348913842673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775048310178534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15276518032865155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31108437286404195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21600227764972232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264282726452058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027426840934544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897410938640908,0.3507502651002745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905432646825426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414487279954045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108440746474538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19652073100722586
mentalhealth,sieiwkkwwkwkk,2020/01/05,"If I stop playing violent video games, will i stop being desensitized for violence? I’ve been having a lot of OCD about how i might be a killer or something. This all started after a bad acid trip. I’ve also been feeling really emotionally numb, and I’ve been feeling kind of desensitized to violence. 

idk if this is from playing games like GTA, or seeing videos of war and violence in the news, but i’m starting to get concerned that there is something really wrong with me. 

If i stop playing these games and watching news like that, will this stop?",5.762285714285714,6.810087704761906,6.218095238095242,77.19857142857146,67.19047619047619,9.428571428571429,32.14285714285714,9.606745405546679,3.023571428571428,439,18,80,9,7,142,64,105,0.28600000000000003,0.61,0.10400000000000001,-0.9672,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,4,11,2,0,4,0,11,1,0,1,1,22,18,11,1,3,6,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,4,2,8,0,1,0,5,0,0,3,5,5,6,11,10,2,9,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,7,9,51,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15443208359537264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612409621413656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21722569280491466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19528707492405453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089336773935123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010970652365294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886901324616272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417743434398974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20486196074712168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24742576442899045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15388574694714952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29733504197269345,0.0,0.0,0.27337219709817195,0.0,0.0,0.6458031523183568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21113832254481,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bananapopsicle0,2020/01/05,"Reassurance/Advice To preface: I do have borderline personality disorder. I don’t know if this thing is related or not, but it’s making me really nervous because I feel like there’s something wrong with me. 
I do this thing where I have a whole other life and version of myself in my head. I have pretend friends, (who are usually celebrities I really like, as I want to be an actress), and I talk to them out loud sometimes. I invent different fantasies of things I did with these people. I know that none of it is actually real, but sometimes I still feel like the people are actually there when I’m alone. 
It’s like I’ll be about type/write something or do something people usually do when they’re alone, and I’ll get all self conscious about it. Then I’ll be like “what the hell, there’s literally nobody here what’s wrong with you.” 
I usually only slip into the world and talk to myself, (I don’t talk for the people, the people talk in my head. It’s like I’m playing with an imaginary friend only I can hear.), when I’m alone. However, sometimes I will accidentally start thinking the people are around me when I’m actually around real people. It’s not like the imaginary people replace the real ones, they’re added. I also never talk to myself in front of people, but I have pretended to make eye contact with someone who wasn’t there in front of a real person before.
Anyway, I’m really worried about this. I’m afraid I’m crazy or something. Acting is huge part of my life, and I think about how my life will be when I finally get to do it as a long term job a lot of the time. I guess I just need possible answers/advice to feel better.",3.479233107318212,5.058701525835873,5.090288753799396,81.10563186813191,73.25531914893618,7.857891045125087,26.02770633621697,8.502166056373571,1.8333066635492168,1298,44,251,23,26,439,145,329,0.115,0.759,0.126,0.5949,3,3,4,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,1,1,22,16,1,2,15,0,26,6,3,3,2,45,49,22,0,3,10,0,3,7,2,2,3,2,0,3,20,14,0,0,8,5,0,3,7,5,0,1,2,6,35,11,35,41,7,30,1,0,1,0,16,11,1,6,23,169,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.20600995697446708,0.0,0.0,0.1375275297560193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186431616070624,0.0,0.05627405773715658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12528664452056834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04289628457878133,0.0,0.059878829545763165,0.0,0.0,0.062235655234265976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352061970108192,0.0806489616858464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067420306105935,0.10054324435200676,0.0,0.07708579148077165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087338178219696,0.0,0.07352978823152452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751937851422454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14443777515652947,0.0,0.0793109686107029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983036676702355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734591574526821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911110100841082,0.2406511462177426,0.0,0.0,0.062274343822882834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059825200854110236,0.0,0.0,0.09394369759968313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052177716165305435,0.054272904990336455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04768385036195972,0.10703757921989206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076202761277662,0.0,0.4390649909495398,0.12288697967591147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933046570889707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203812759867035,0.1352405351495981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341020589995204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05962341883934096,0.216693952832902,0.2087901982140251,0.0,0.049807534953497296,0.0,0.0561967681685509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827996524962195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025009506047084,0.09017921781051914,0.0,0.0,0.04103272531603843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325045101625865,0.0,0.0415054548698809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856446690713492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146312749626897,0.0,0.0,0.15387489279163027,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway125033030,2020/01/05,"Scared of death I have been so terrified of death for as long as I can remember. I used to cry to my mom when I was around 7 or so about the fact that I was going to die one day and there was nothing I could do to stop it.

I recently decided to force myself to accept it by thinking about it constantly. I figured I’d eventually accept it from overexposure to the concept. It actually worked kind of, because now I no longer get panic attacks from thinking about it. I still have dread though, not really anxiety but just lowkey fear. It’s kind of like the feeling before walking into school in the mornings. I don’t have like a full on panic attack, but more of a “well fuck guess I’m gonna have to do this shit”

This doesn’t excuse the fact that I’m still scared though. Every time I look at someone all I can think about is the fact that they’re gonna die, and so am I. I’m only 15 and if I do get to live out my full lifespan, that means I have a long time but I just can’t help but to think about how scared I am of growing old and just dying. I’m terrified of it just being nothing forever. I wouldn’t call myself a Christian necessarily, but I do believe in some sort of higher being and an afterlife, but I’m not sure if that’s just wishful thinking at this point.",2.7867843866171,3.8357222044609682,4.438399628252789,87.19737639405207,74.16728624535315,7.4617843866171025,24.974163568773236,7.908726449838941,1.201237769516728,999,31,220,14,20,337,137,269,0.24100000000000002,0.682,0.077,-0.9945,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,23,19,4,7,11,0,25,2,1,2,5,50,47,23,5,5,16,1,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,16,8,0,1,12,0,0,3,7,11,1,1,4,2,24,8,37,37,5,27,1,0,1,1,4,11,2,6,15,153,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.10151601710995352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958089642405393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926066972848431,0.0,0.2366930255744787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341431292749677,0.0,0.08851990030916429,0.11720358079276948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622390022769357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241697398926707,0.0,0.08305764389136942,0.0,0.11426953027486288,0.06708925262951007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32389294822078674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764781364156808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706007018398612,0.052599524629575116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617192108324284,0.10870034657297438,0.0,0.05912133229081075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459822628735837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697275663169722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21665765724552216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164534722672153,0.0,0.09185835419532268,0.1841224602697752,0.08735705770204437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331664876643065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12183597065839745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996347441560448,0.0,0.10915955899635102,0.0,0.07049185350511655,0.07911774423243997,0.0,0.24410815521129284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983397896830182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664280058030135,0.0,0.10271479170015872,0.0,0.11784309128178425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31244958976791465,0.10528157381800243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10678292659974324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814232228297546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661532916963747,0.086971805045052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804486462619964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.333283709413722,0.20441335015509585,0.0,0.12131876263924228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984652177199241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353338454745537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962670703707196,0.0,0.0,0.07573339567585989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yami--yumi,2020/01/05,"being told ""i'm proud of you"" (side account because i think my bf follows my main acc)

i have depression and ptsd and my boyfriend tells me that he's proud of me when i get out of it and get through my day, but i don't really like hearing it. i don't know why. i just kind of wanted to know if anyone else feels the same way.",2.1241666666666674,2.5606730833333344,3.6287777777777817,94.694,75.1111111111111,6.871111111111111,24.12222222222222,6.742157984588678,0.4699022222222222,250,7,63,2,5,83,51,72,0.079,0.86,0.061,-0.305,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,2,2,5,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,13,15,6,0,2,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,1,2,13,4,7,13,2,6,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,1,3,37,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317357793514585,0.2684163845176319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15969279163506006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16894719104448033,0.0,0.22563199093760125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21884000537914747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324585024894556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737341302709282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952561068887702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727985569614779,0.28794067663943423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279839558768749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062256725313592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782291529697127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22897090529012715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16785802291547852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503209141835063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545150593189808,0.20793739323721955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363846782629464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KindaCrazy71,2020/01/05,"Persecution Do you ever feel like the whole world is against you? Especially, family? Atm I feel like my dad resents me and wants to harm me if he gets the chance. Before that it was my brother and sister. My mom is the only one I feel truly comfortable around. Because she's s lot like me in terms of personality and stuff. Other than that I really have no friends and feel more comfortable alone. I've gone through years of stress regarding this and it's affected my overall health and the way I look and feel. I just don't feel safe and loved at home. I've gone through a lot of traumatic situations with my family. It's hard to feel loved or even liked. Going to the store and in public can be very hard.",2.6061863488624084,4.6786461408450775,3.877042253521129,86.72131635969662,77.02816901408453,7.749512459371616,22.89490790899241,8.617729084823388,1.4219722643553627,560,17,118,12,13,183,89,142,0.14400000000000002,0.654,0.20199999999999999,0.9111,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,0,4,13,1,1,6,0,8,3,0,1,1,27,23,11,0,2,3,4,9,4,1,0,1,0,1,1,8,11,0,1,7,0,2,3,2,3,0,1,3,10,16,10,15,19,5,12,0,0,1,2,13,5,0,4,7,73,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459752858757507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254698771451042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591804141099052,0.0,0.119932805534849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309206051325253,0.1274917498237882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657385701460989,0.0,0.4988579941475448,0.2013805791493673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088928418176362,0.0,0.07363732607908031,0.0,0.08010161809751744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25251594804855204,0.0,0.0,0.14981668448052518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137813826863765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754321145841265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835730696582375,0.0,0.0,0.2396507825736873,0.2544145916441926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507169263734908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550717667657553,0.1071941224543244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306670277324132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029221694082208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15842675333781864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145066384582168,0.0,0.16134694762548854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629340817859055,0.08313231379615528,0.11187463992661847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735873601739758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907631958145754
mentalhealth,kaelas93,2020/01/05,"While the bushfires rage, my anxiety is at a near constant 10. I live in Australia, and the bushfires burning for the last few weeks have been horrible. Im lucky enough to live somewhere that hasnt been in the direct path of the fires, but the air quality has been awful (the worst of any major city in the world) and yesterday was the hottest day on record with the fire danger extreme. Not to mention deranged people intentionally lighting fires in these conditions.

I havent been able to sleep the last few days without the tv on and help of my medication, my mind just wont stop worrying. The smoke is causing my eyes to burn and coughing and headaches. I have a bag packed and have been keeping my car topped up with petrol just in case, and my landlords have put sprinklers on the roof. Today you cant see because of the smoke, its worse than the thickest fog I have seen. 

 I feel powerless and unable to help, watching people have their homes destroyed, lives lost. The death toll for the wildlife is incomprehensible. I tried to donate blood but was unable too due to my headaches. Last night while unable to sleep i went through and packed up 6 bags of clothes to donate. I cant contribute much financially but have donated what I can. 

Its a strange kind of helplessness in the face of such a catastrophic event. There isn't anything to do but pray for rain, help in small ways for people affected by the fires, and be prepared should disaster strike. I feel horrible for feeling horrible if that makes sense? So many people have lost everything, and here I am safe but riddled with anxiety, feeling sorry for myself. I cant seem to stop shaking the last two days. Its a constant battle in my head catastrophising everything and beating myself up for selfish thoughts. 

Sorry of this was rambly and disjointed, I just needed to write it out to try and get it out of my head.",6.923789403085178,7.293403380281693,6.3262374245472826,79.81582159624415,64.49295774647888,9.466130114017435,34.087860496311194,9.23628265651192,2.8999268947015424,1500,61,281,24,21,461,188,355,0.235,0.687,0.078,-0.9969,1,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,1,4,8,13,4,1,26,1,32,9,7,4,0,49,47,23,1,3,11,0,8,0,0,2,2,0,2,0,10,19,0,4,6,1,3,4,9,10,0,1,13,13,26,3,54,31,6,46,1,3,4,0,7,22,0,3,19,185,36,0,0.10280429725418468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991044744241189,0.0,0.15729001202343135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459917714638096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062668545411162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560833202704296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221898468721578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989008008249032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622432038446082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18478774702541492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20792376646091545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053711002224418436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21101373604653872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20672266028369665,0.0,0.10312109229599248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110462823404998,0.0,0.0,0.09137718297165112,0.0,0.1070548556387469,0.0,0.3351968934757401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723342338124464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244460691404581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06862266670561926,0.10422742164324934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356451392297976,0.0,0.0,0.10380303401586803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557298729587363,0.07622808378545735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647486881896636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28508622179142457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334671347788732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192171479435036,0.09358917116083132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20575708257636344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301619881285534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17189799155241653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161512866838576,0.0,0.0,0.09744645320600342,0.0,0.0,0.1395947391685751,0.0,0.1004248603687018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160126601421627,0.08246340619768952,0.0,0.0,0.09530061350680999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990996739731314,0.0,0.0,0.10440275410096657,0.10476636171883963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kantiboi,2020/01/05,I am taking my friend to the hospital tonight. My best friend/roommate has been dealing with very intense depression and suicidal thoughts in the past year. They have been on medication but is hasn't been as effective as needed. Tonight I spoke to them and they agreed to go to the hospital and seek help. I have no idea what to expect at the hospital. I'm just hoping this will help things. If anybody has any experience with this or can offer any insight I would really appreciate it.,5.1077329192546586,6.873445239130441,5.56832298136646,78.54934782608694,69.43478260869566,9.604968944099381,31.62111801242236,9.957137785484203,3.263246583850932,390,17,72,10,7,125,63,92,0.105,0.677,0.217,0.9015,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,3,2,1,4,0,0,4,0,13,1,0,1,0,17,20,8,1,5,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,5,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,1,9,3,12,13,1,8,0,1,0,0,9,3,0,3,4,52,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056439732075817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358369990853925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316835485738057,0.1935569349698189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198260132109376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472468645811048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12771746640067533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012593851736637,0.0,0.0,0.22320450130970687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536892969748006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22638869208215304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16663213618665285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21452723813101016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14396579566398712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245814735273501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16896664835572786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14929855538500889,0.0,0.0,0.1784080428079208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854232137181944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15963952990234476,0.0,0.0,0.14471674464495266
mentalhealth,proximet,2020/01/05,"Really hard to explain, but I really need help. Please I really don’t know what to call this or how to explain it, all I know is that it’s impacting my life negatively. I feel like I have a self esteem issue, and I’ve had it for a while but I’m just starting to notice now. I also have OCD, Anxiety and social anxiety. ANYWAY sometimes with certain celebrities or other people I look up to (who I don’t actually know personally), I tend to think less of myself because I’m nothing to that person and I don’t know them in real life. I also feel like I’ve accomplished a lot less and if they knew me in real life they’d think poorly of me. I start becoming ungrateful with my actual life and start fantasizing about actually knowing them, which I don’t. It’s ruining my self-esteem, sometimes I feel like I can’t say things and I’m uncomfortable going outside because I feel like if they saw me, they’d think I look stupid or something like that. Even if I know they wouldn’t actually see me obviously, I think “if they were there to see me, they’d think I look stupid”. I need some help getting over this. Really. And I know this doesn’t make much sense but it’s really hard to explain, trust me. I feel like I don’t deserve to enjoy my life cuz of this.  IM 16 BTW",1.9452011494252872,3.8715223371647554,4.20374042145594,84.29342672413793,78.50191570881225,7.5683908045976995,22.752394636015325,8.472884824447931,1.4472463601532568,994,31,207,21,24,344,116,261,0.1,0.726,0.174,0.97,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,9,1,9,12,2,0,3,0,16,5,0,3,3,54,55,22,0,7,11,0,7,6,0,1,5,1,0,3,17,9,0,0,21,0,1,1,9,3,0,0,4,14,44,9,21,47,6,10,0,1,6,0,21,4,0,9,11,132,61,1,0.0,0.0,0.3207200108612514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13141269970925082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257101425572388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017256246783653,0.0907434461840788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389841180887413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542684056449553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20772239434174888,0.2934891251208825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04292718691837832,0.0,0.04669557296043024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720522700825212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014530742614843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875098808814423,0.08575764559958454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31608547551925953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29017355906781395,0.24084645306198765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069906598925728,0.0,0.0,0.06985271251992753,0.0,0.0,0.05484496506323739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06039983648183218,0.1218468122198054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883836848704058,0.09354401476149464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05696202371890877,0.14348449718834275,0.0,0.09019116353508366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870407524651812,0.26318112567877233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533994031617253,0.0,0.0,0.13094779907318085,0.0,0.17142949578265326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375563253859579,0.0,0.06325369650223031,0.16252417024489846,0.0,0.17446785154556754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545859684062027,0.2632361817034057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raviolidie,2020/01/05,Thoughts about trying antidepressants? I've been struggling with depression for my entire life. I'm now 21 and it's becoming unbearable. I'm absolutely terrified of medication but I feel like it's the only thing left that might help me (I'm currently in therapy). Just looking for some insight or advice on this. Thanks :),2.9872222222222216,6.067395844827588,4.419885057471267,74.85250957854406,90.55172413793105,8.784674329501916,28.858237547892717,8.841846274778883,3.744235249042146,261,13,42,9,9,86,49,58,0.10300000000000001,0.669,0.228,0.8877,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,10,9,3,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,3,2,7,6,1,5,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,3,3,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25882193670916503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925213671751136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281268881226864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13392314561753454,0.18921882238687007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17753268842611586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877754012736457,0.0,0.18708120483852272,0.12939912227205855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224189675047404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668225131738091,0.0,0.2809787407722703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014409304340799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768932553804884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24385109263653426,0.3028949516545366,0.0,0.17596380541211504,0.0,0.0,0.21027235024245566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17982520131607016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yaebinism,2020/01/05,my mom won’t listen to me I’ve been on medication for two years for my depression. Recently I’ve been being bullied at school which tremendously harms my mental health. I brought up the idea of online schooling just to finish off the year. It’s winter break currently and I’ve been depressed throughout all of it. She keeps on telling me to get over it. School starts back up Tuesday and she hasn’t done anything to help me. She keeps on brushing it off.  I’m really struggling at school because of those people. Can someone give me some advice on how to convince her or how online school will help my over all wellbeing?,3.6102954545454544,5.9374090750000015,3.906212121212121,86.48727272727274,74.91666666666666,6.696969696969697,26.74242424242424,7.686295010490155,1.5970833333333332,499,19,93,7,11,155,76,120,0.13699999999999998,0.8059999999999999,0.057,-0.9059,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,9,2,0,2,2,12,17,5,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,6,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,5,2,13,1,22,9,3,23,0,2,0,0,10,12,0,2,9,63,19,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13586826544592215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441806176872127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069131670557652,0.0,0.0847574851396411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395098729643945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422861796599848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264265418964931,0.13337982434127946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779300365783346,0.0,0.0,0.1863911439895624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695922055269015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471702566896511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006815847137358,0.14011960365918874,0.0,0.0,0.16284195153796646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963928197490098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907257556045756,0.0,0.137285212584439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7035794457443483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780812920916164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841321795387843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14535478252176112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152707648124915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582186333679816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790743851732204
mentalhealth,hem0phobia,2020/01/05,"Feel alone in this battle. I feel like no one understands. I know my boyfriend gets annoyed with my depression and anxiety sometimes. And I don’t like talking about it to him all the time because I know it makes him uncomfortable because he doesn’t know how to help me really, except for being there. I guess I’m just looking for an accountability partner, just a simple “hey, are you doing okay today?”  type of deal. Because I feel like if I don’t say it I don’t deal with it the way I should, if that makes sense. 

I’m on Snapchat a lot, so I guess that would be the best way of communication. Either way, if you read this, thanks for listening. And I hope you’re all well 🙂",1.99163952835486,4.052675474452556,3.4207299270073013,89.30780460415498,78.92700729927007,6.55115103874228,22.947220662549128,7.61054688173877,0.9053519371139812,528,17,114,8,13,173,83,137,0.122,0.7040000000000001,0.174,0.8061,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,1,7,11,2,0,6,1,10,0,0,3,2,30,28,8,0,6,7,0,3,3,1,2,0,2,0,1,8,5,0,0,7,1,1,0,5,3,1,1,0,6,18,8,13,24,5,7,0,1,1,0,13,2,0,7,5,74,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15550433977485908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486007169774433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27457993777941025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756730748258976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30958461206986665,0.1293191704696607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22775259296001665,0.2145264098386892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784442633971619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3308020160431812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006386410100288,0.0,0.0,0.14912728887221952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475463427820094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22005894118091066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260834994556307,0.0,0.0,0.12764741818135486,0.0,0.0,0.20044513485633567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10174174596577286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15018505299208715,0.0,0.09618636125941188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940087055465275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484966723225667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068039885651848,0.0,0.1382328110350487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755041976891534,0.0,0.14231935592026113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15630563819959287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3575329600822972,0.0,0.0,0.13499786679967815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665828937804207,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Treemebe,2020/01/05,"How much does drinking as a teen really affect your brain? I was very depressed when I was 16-17 and drank 2-3x a week often to the point of throwing up (I think that was due to mixing a bit of each liquor together too). I regret it a lot and don’t advocate anyone to do it, but am I really fucked for life because of it? When I try to research it, people act like it’s the end of the world to stop any teens from drinking... 

I feel slightly better knowing that until recent times, people used to start drinking at a much earlier age and didn’t “stop” like I did. I’m 21 now and drink maybe 3-4 times a month at MOST (only really 2ish beers on average). I just can’t help feeling like I’m permanently fucked and gonna be stupid for the rest of my life now.",4.628419599723948,3.909924664596275,5.97175983436853,84.11007591442376,69.43478260869566,9.143133195307106,27.20565907522429,8.515128840125781,1.6049042097998618,585,15,132,8,9,199,102,161,0.163,0.728,0.10800000000000001,-0.9076,0,0,5,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,1,8,9,3,0,10,0,10,12,1,3,0,21,22,11,0,1,2,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,6,7,2,4,6,0,2,3,5,0,0,6,2,11,4,20,14,7,24,0,2,0,2,2,6,2,3,19,78,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940967772119246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675196576374524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434945521707636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237758271225226,0.15106489651141197,0.0,0.0,0.15446739136556825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917842577781435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108907577030645,0.0,0.0,0.5422021789660192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255531265566952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992870197157206,0.09885200979671996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25584284607249186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927469203864689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604488267972752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954705442111776,0.2028027097067288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763776629718853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13901190184503154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044612128832393,0.0,0.2034366767478408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523710367469133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185755262254925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080497608494526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659313172492607,0.0,0.13662430960262187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793944814304804,0.0,0.0,0.2313680945556684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866231619954741,0.0,0.0,0.1613700608556578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394457875786248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950780217837338,0.0,0.11417026580341035,0.0,0.0,0.11099257757593796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DemonicTemplar8,2020/01/05,How do I get over my internet and gaming addiction? I've been addicted to videogames and the internet for a long time and I can't stop. What do I do?,1.124270833333334,2.9235937187500016,3.6887500000000015,87.61458333333336,80.5625,9.266666666666666,26.291666666666664,9.725611199111238,2.5947166666666672,117,5,27,4,3,41,24,32,0.0,0.917,0.083,0.3067,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,1,0,5,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,3,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8331206225304328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199638625665462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381585807339136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3194641448393603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.222813558597746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,autisticscreechiing,2020/01/05,"Trust issues and Nightmares I have trust issues ever since I have memory. 
Never had someone I could really trust, not even my friends. I have frequent nightmares, lately is has gotten worse. I've already said this on other subreddits with more detail, but I really need help. Even if my life right now is ok, the past won't let me go. It drags me into it and I can't escape. It sucks, I feel numb 90% of the time and can only feel emotions in its extremes, so every time it all comes back it's really bad, because the rest of my emotions are blind. Help.",2.450810810810811,4.4174197117117115,3.834495495495496,87.34147297297298,77.10810810810811,6.241801801801803,21.009909909909908,7.1686216300943375,0.6338028828828826,432,11,85,5,10,142,77,111,0.156,0.688,0.156,-0.0157,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,6,8,1,0,3,1,13,3,0,0,3,16,21,6,0,3,3,0,2,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,3,4,12,5,6,15,3,15,0,0,1,0,4,4,1,1,9,58,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858175257701501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947801342195453,0.14059481314303302,0.10264620439872926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14504915103505636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444207621547294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3788219232157232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22243399673493616,0.15231427528665942,0.14187199985025944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028148085673786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300941771391657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569732885990766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22573042879392136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.351501313417838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18994611635800498,0.0,0.0,0.17218552601557205,0.11893561958044163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485567389237465,0.12986923584767854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806471869110245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16074296050021278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3236160835436521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380025002107608,0.16017311811124452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13929018018364167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14267244115033115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19637381424452727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715991540660177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chayseen,2020/01/05,"Upcoming Psychiatrist appointment (Sorry for being so wordy I just had a lot on my mind lol) A few months ago I slowly tried to open up to my parents about my crippling anxiety and many other symptoms I’d been experiencing. I’m not one to “self diagnose” but I have had legitimate concerns for years and very little outlets to vent to, confessing to my parents gives me horrible anxiety and my friends just... don’t seem to get it. When I finally started to open up to my family about my concerns and issues at school my father suspected I had adhd and insisted I went to the doctor with him. Of course I agreed and the doctor referred me to a child psychiatrist (I’m still 17) and prescribed me Zoloft for my anxiety. After about a month I stopped taking it because it made me more depressed than I was before and now, two months out from my appointment and I’m becoming increasingly stressed, I was looking up more about the doctor I’ll be seeing and he has a lot of really bad reviews. Having to go see another doctor wouldn’t be a big issue for me if i didn’t have to likely wait another 6 months for a second referral if he really is as bad as some people are making it out to be. Maybe I’m stressing over nothing, I just needed a place to express my thoughts.",5.316700000000001,5.942611100000002,6.7405500000000025,74.56602500000002,68.0,10.090000000000002,32.425,10.125756701596842,3.3411800000000005,1005,42,186,24,16,344,140,250,0.146,0.8270000000000001,0.027000000000000003,-0.983,2,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,2,11,1,19,7,0,2,0,37,38,17,0,4,7,3,0,1,1,1,7,0,0,2,5,15,0,2,5,0,0,3,4,5,0,3,10,4,29,2,40,23,7,29,1,1,3,0,12,13,0,6,14,134,34,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457741280554906,0.0,0.09188703513999588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173900200881984,0.23789548214404505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731010905334467,0.06318927961610789,0.11448270570289293,0.08820577680343207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928094261309796,0.10521122903836147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4243956038091852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772003957482292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11355285615381495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008632548887487,0.0,0.05415730516406186,0.0994387103577074,0.05891153313719798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216385154318126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064232324750681,0.10389308217758336,0.0,0.0,0.08704706068306924,0.0,0.0,0.17625355584898938,0.0,0.09808421031881596,0.06919287572441439,0.10509348265020052,0.10413892909025367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466556864204424,0.0,0.3309570084426381,0.0,0.0,0.07686148879500619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946315813583974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024170469031613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302010675562449,0.0,0.0,0.07186377498188071,0.0,0.10830110443036367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328126211848688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490796949918584,0.1652048602311819,0.09436683533535832,0.1081384570444284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603724108669075,0.07337004321167766,0.0,0.08278183838515177,0.08666317514143491,0.2374809987382893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077409059696708,0.07793831638079776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229329646149235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037733960783486,0.0,0.10125932460395408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552914575595895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609249863641896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06675269669782195
mentalhealth,CantThrowAwayAName,2020/01/05,"How to seek professional mental help?  Weird question - I am 23 years old. I have never scheduled any medical appointment. I am on my own health insurance plan.

I suffered from really bad depression and anxiety back when I was 14 - 15 and was on medication then. When I was 16 I got off the medication because I was doing great and have been fine ever since..until this past year. 2 years ago I moved out and got my own apartment so I spend a lot of time alone. I have a ton of hobbies that I usually do solo. I usually don't mind being alone, but now I feel like I have gotten to comfortable being alone that I don't want to spend time with other people, even my family.

I used to always meet up with friends after work or on the weekends. But for the past 6 months or so I always try to find an excuse to not meet up with friends or family. I definitely have noticed over the past couple of months that my social skills have been getting worse (avoiding talking to people at work, avoiding going to parties, bars, etc). I'm usually fine with being alone (I have not seen my friends or family in 2 months) but now it's starting to worry me. I still decline invites out even though I know I should socialize.

I'm certain I have social anxiety. I'm not sure if I have depression, but some days I feel really bad - overthinking everything, past friendships, family relationships, stressing that I am not socializing, etc. I have a good paying job that I love and I wake up with motivation to go to work, or to do errands / hobbies for the day. But if I am not keeping myself occupied, I get very sad.

I believe medication would help me, I think. Or not, maybe I just need a therapist. My question is how do I get mentally evaluated? Do I need to see a doctor? Will the doctor recommend a therapist or do I go straight to a therapist? Or do I need to see a physiologist?

Also, where do I find a doctor / therapist etc? Can I only go to certain ones my insurance provides?

Thank you!",3.326829896907217,5.096560896907217,5.257306701030932,78.96626932989692,74.05154639175258,8.767525773195876,28.10438144329897,9.354420925462401,2.633717525773197,1540,62,295,38,32,530,184,388,0.129,0.6970000000000001,0.174,0.9709,1,6,0,0,0,0,53.0,0,1,0,6,17,24,0,3,16,0,38,11,1,4,5,63,67,29,0,8,22,0,2,1,3,3,8,0,0,0,8,12,1,3,9,2,3,5,9,10,0,1,10,5,52,14,40,51,8,52,0,4,3,1,18,15,0,14,33,208,60,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05753193471092907,0.0,0.0,0.2688766583605076,0.0,0.051902311346737035,0.10800775380523102,0.0,0.0,0.04413576024469901,0.0,0.09930009767525083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04990582933304727,0.10838134698532756,0.0395638133689458,0.0,0.0,0.07312261826378089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181311273326031,0.0,0.08371317286464118,0.0,0.11180043742887467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929063006077694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21714951754154949,0.08573465707065794,0.05870780703647946,0.0,0.0,0.058329963526481725,0.0,0.2447362863848029,0.0,0.06563306230626775,0.04636618525487365,0.0,0.0,0.11863897389722962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15042996791367708,0.0,0.1017262513717496,0.0,0.14754179294200534,0.05443693377101745,0.10381652745854582,0.07155496729164743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898806405500207,0.0,0.0,0.08700522935853802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440547533158975,0.05768810795832676,0.0,0.0,0.035668583018838865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03170796435260256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517757783904925,0.05857682075175781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520304045242499,0.0,0.0,0.2615287828119632,0.13081241944282332,0.0,0.06553277785513525,0.0,0.15541308661910255,0.06898082775932242,0.0,0.14437260322096304,0.05005662157254369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389164958206976,0.06810400081927592,0.0,0.04397944891867158,0.049361090934834866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24782619199043565,0.08999010587379032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454107624810379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831560952984686,0.0,0.0,0.06968073485502788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343739155657504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646387100594712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04593815144172552,0.0,0.05183102615041508,0.0,0.07434531592885449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611696089854275,0.0,0.0,0.052165975594527916,0.0,0.059753278205442725,0.0,0.301426090130904,0.0,0.041586745545064335,0.06376613781894698,0.0,0.07569005578753472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04406437209861009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056054711549113234,0.2144419997637956,0.05355115900754037,0.0382810326439657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14174884788590222,0.06591139225195546,0.06614094447530247,0.04610470112270853,0.0,0.0,0.1253847765034456
mentalhealth,ddbb3,2020/01/05,"advice anyone? I’ve been noticing my mental health worsening lately but it really doesn’t make any sense to me. I know for a fact I have a good life, friends and family who care, and an amazing boyfriend. I feel incredibly guilty that despite having all these things, I can’t stop panicking about every single thing that could go wrong in my life. I also can’t stop over analyzing every single thing I do and almost always feel uncomfortable about myself. Even though I have a boyfriend of almost 2 years, I genuinely don’t understand why he stays with me (I completely believe I’m a burden despite what he tells me) and my fear of being potentially hurt by him has been getting so great I don’t know how to handle it. I know very well my fears are ill placed and a result of trauma but it’s incredibly hard to finally put them aside. Kinda dumped a lot on here but if anyone has any advice I’d appreciate it",4.065985634477254,5.7329943575419025,5.283579409417398,79.95470670391066,71.90502793296089,8.242777334397447,24.51755786113328,8.841846274778883,1.7950619313647251,726,21,137,14,14,241,115,179,0.244,0.609,0.146,-0.9586,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,9,13,1,2,7,0,16,4,0,3,2,28,27,13,0,2,4,0,3,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,12,6,0,2,6,0,0,2,5,7,1,0,2,3,21,6,14,23,4,12,0,1,0,0,7,4,0,5,5,90,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496892231991315,0.0,0.0,0.2558643581284937,0.0,0.0,0.10216882239927468,0.10630571866588916,0.0,0.0,0.17376099572032286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17866412014455751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14394063780421332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13025881041933468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13395287587631605,0.0,0.0,0.1020051619188796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438361148501579,0.0,0.21528492751461145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043981052820163,0.2875287776997413,0.12919757352407707,0.0,0.0,0.1399537345626007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987062828642684,0.0,0.06674880199657783,0.0,0.07260838124750475,0.10715818378985953,0.0,0.14085474336907036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444696538254205,0.0,0.0,0.13580183774510088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676864686434986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210639007924334,0.0,0.14411771151099434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18047991335362812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861612911607617,0.0,0.0,0.08528012144089403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875101804607264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454544629526318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348095799327364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12843307756779165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184568385797443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13617409013579118,0.0,0.2136244815131244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11166699311526118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546321987414349,0.0,0.12552256423395755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330016197909869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541455114331193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487068003111775,0.0,0.11528262163568355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13968440543923238,0.0,0.08227260424282072
mentalhealth,midnight-in-my-mind,2020/01/05,"I think I'm having trouble keeping it together I feel like I'm dying, inside. More and more each day. I don't know what to do. I'm supposed to be happy, its the new year, things are supposed to be going great for me. But it doesn't feel like they are. It feels like every breath is a fight not to relapse, like every day is just the same old thing only I get more and more tired each day. I don't know what to do, but i know what i *want* to do. 

I don't even understand why i dont relapse? Not like I'ne not done it thousands of times already. What is the actual point? What the hell am i fighting for anymore",-0.2952272727272742,1.7282938712121236,1.7874545454545476,97.92118181818184,87.56060606060606,4.42909090909091,17.89090909090909,5.6839178017228535,-0.5345490909090911,469,12,111,3,15,156,69,132,0.12,0.765,0.115,-0.5773,0,0,0,0,3,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,2,11,3,0,5,0,18,2,1,0,0,21,33,4,1,1,6,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,12,4,0,1,8,0,0,1,8,4,0,1,1,3,12,7,9,30,7,9,1,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,12,73,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.14883667377073212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683086571516707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151257997952669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295086671780829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829078157116158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608002773723054,0.17875128930847303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073744965705013,0.0,0.2570078972180032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313547707247489,0.326879099712467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968495259287027,0.0,0.08668013873640909,0.0,0.0,0.16815288382884724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235945437347102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13556601425425907,0.0,0.0,0.2514615822096751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3725657245080443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14730393015898968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004317479969266,0.0,0.0,0.11599767428863506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14417988030283638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026538712147456,0.09772810270399376,0.0,0.0,0.08893513364323742,0.1752983082225648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15877779751557353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995973695009246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13762479572730338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821732184972043
mentalhealth,Fout99,2020/01/05,"Sertraline extreme fatigue I have been taking Sertraline for over a year now. I have noticed that when i run out of pills and spend 3-4 days without taking it (50mg), i feel actually better than when i take it. I don't know how to explain it, but i feel overall better and more motivated and 'normal' than when i take it. I started taking it for depression and anxiety/OCD but i don't seem to be noticing any rebound anxiety when i skip it a few days. Haven't taken it for 4 days now and i feel more motivated, better overall and kinda 'smarter' (memory working better and not so fatigued as always). 

Has this happened to anybody? Does anyone know why it may be happening?? Thank you! Great community here.",3.809170537491706,5.557572080291973,5.546104844061052,77.48268745852691,72.72262773722629,8.193497013934971,30.7027206370272,8.841846274778883,2.7409766423357658,553,25,100,11,11,189,79,137,0.057999999999999996,0.7020000000000001,0.239,0.9832,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,7,9,9,0,0,2,0,10,3,0,3,0,25,27,16,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,10,8,0,0,9,0,1,1,5,3,0,0,2,3,13,6,13,22,3,14,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,3,11,70,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.1328672638601128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329154693475445,0.0,0.0,0.09258980725180524,0.0,0.10415790792842623,0.0,0.0,0.09520247267473024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.481670770498327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26342538897033463,0.0,0.117269770530919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914982125924604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065315932451714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501109438856579,0.0,0.0,0.24080215306293445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965403148599715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340261449810167,0.0,0.3100258635804737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395004803503268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637093739660836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5118566297597232,0.0,0.0,0.12535287669299705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285836268930075,0.0,0.0,0.13124819032873894,0.0,0.0991221814325908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767910816081814
mentalhealth,Warmspirit,2020/01/05,"A crazy time at the minute I have always felt like there was something wrong with me, that my mind didn't work right or I was just incorrect and recently it's gotten ten times worse. I really want to see my GP and ask about whether or not I have a definable issue because it feels like I'm just different and I can't communicate with other people and I'm an outsider or I just can't connect to anyone and that the only person I can fully relate to is myself or even partly relate to. I don't know whether my having labelled a condition to myself will make me any better but I just want to know *why*
Why do I have to be different, why can't I concentrate, why can't I have a defining hobby, why can't I be the best at something, why can't everything just stop? 
This is really just me ranting on a forum and it's kinda funny for me because I'm basically still talking to myself but writing it down at the same time
I w",1.609249713631158,3.4882714484536086,3.941168384879728,86.00277205040095,79.36082474226805,6.785337915234822,22.63344788087057,7.793537801064563,1.1332815578465072,727,23,150,12,18,252,99,194,0.059000000000000004,0.858,0.08199999999999999,0.2562,2,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,10,5,0,0,10,0,22,0,0,1,0,35,35,14,0,2,15,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,8,0,1,4,0,0,0,9,1,0,1,5,3,24,4,17,27,3,12,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,5,8,109,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260921858389284,0.0,0.0,0.08385945843260878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622577405562593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528429437178747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15034520507878152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294130737414591,0.10906343569480637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576790217385371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144939467440504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082893156490002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06235253488058296,0.08809734246113317,0.11840319234712088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871040230085734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13554306251596196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049243986588318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231473086873024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451452586400505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937877659858635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13353976788850608,0.0,0.08549214402368395,0.10767522375367836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15799943353049045,0.0,0.1217601808635907,0.0,0.0,0.10531162942867857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826729606020453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18987015482752104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848072762046142,0.10309812770911862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911714305388494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21572055353364955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14547055031864106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6676438410346243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977589110850846,0.0,0.12567006330396882,0.0,0.13482724984459726,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ashuhhleee,2020/01/05,"Has anyone tried Xanax for social anxiety? So my psychiatrist prescribed my Xanax for my social anxiety.. I get extremely extremely nervous around people to the point it makes finding work hard and just simple things like going to the store. I’m on 2mg Xanax right now, and I took them but Im not sure how it’s suppose to work.. it seems to make me really calm
Almost like I feel when I drink and feel buzzed.. is that what it’s suppose to do?? obviously it  isn’t going to automatically give me amazing social skills but it seems *so far* to help just calm me down when I’m around people, but I’m still testing it out. I know I should try and do something completely out of social zone to see how it helps I’m just extremely nervous... so have any of you tried Xanax for social anxiety or just anxiety in general?",3.021269841269841,4.943902308641976,4.5105114638448,83.33444444444446,75.2962962962963,7.8384479717813065,24.53439153439153,8.634040054169528,1.7101132275132271,642,21,128,13,14,214,88,162,0.064,0.789,0.147,0.9581,0,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,3,15,8,0,2,2,0,7,5,0,4,2,32,24,15,0,1,9,0,3,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,11,8,1,0,6,1,1,3,2,2,0,0,1,4,14,6,20,22,0,17,0,0,1,0,10,10,0,4,6,76,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830532394245286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034276847943167,0.0,0.3615229334795857,0.0,0.0,0.08260985142753001,0.0,0.0,0.21034850301179214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387296526554355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573729043769462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947549787820687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798254702780707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06172597622221448,0.11333561469710254,0.13428924805711842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058348682313366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15838043708995464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12761705980974594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649294968883231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154395268059846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772563973681716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381397310417595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168537564130887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07568682260345624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089533154068103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941464059514458,0.21510985513146544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6021706235239606,0.0,0.090953925624981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435088714834862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135042662562572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849040269781331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13126363345984055,0.24063845005153395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202218495512836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JonnyBoi0,2020/01/05,"I'm about to end it all. I'm so fucking tired of it all, my family, my problems, all of it. I'm going to end it soon. [I have ocd, so I made a flow chart of SOME of it.](https://drive.google.com/file/d/107e5HrVt56wG5a-s7CYDZkAUX4CoJLwj/view?usp=drivesdk)",4.489374999999999,6.600459187500004,4.577500000000004,83.61750000000002,71.70833333333334,7.300000000000002,26.583333333333336,8.07648339933343,1.4391083333333332,203,7,41,3,4,63,30,48,0.15,0.85,0.0,-0.7328,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,3,6,7,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,7,6,4,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6135280572224356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32650873341055325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201957567235931,0.0,0.0,0.19683915552625486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32772552506233416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314109638594881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3980793231150781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fuck_red,2020/01/05,"Why is this happening with my Zoloft? TL;DR: Upped my Zoloft dosage from 50 to 75mg almost 2 months ago (on November 15th) and now I'm going through manic and depressive symptoms. How can I do so well on 50 mg but have a total decline at 75?

I'm diagnosed with PTSD and social anxiety disorder, so my psychiatrist put me on Zoloft last April. I was having so much progress and success with 50 mg of Zoloft, but a few months ago I was in a terrible mental state and we went up to 75 mg as o lf November 15th, so almost 2 months soon. 

Now, she's worried I'm potentially bipolar because I immediately swung into mania, which lasted a couple weeks, and now I've been in a month long depressive state. I'm having severe relapse in my social anxiety, which was totally in control before all of this, and my PTSD is getting harder than ever. 

How can this happen? I don't understand how 50 mg was perfect but going up in dosage would make me worse? I'm meeting with my psychiatrist later this month to talk more about it and I'm going back into therapy as soon as my insurance is straightened out, but I feel like I'm going crazy.",4.637866666666664,5.406389942222227,6.150666666666666,77.68200000000002,69.57777777777778,9.2,29.222222222222207,9.3871,2.5549555555555554,887,32,170,18,15,303,119,225,0.133,0.785,0.08199999999999999,-0.8771,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,0,4,16,7,0,0,5,0,16,7,0,5,5,35,34,22,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,1,7,0,0,0,7,16,0,1,2,0,0,6,1,3,1,0,6,1,17,4,31,27,6,43,0,2,0,0,6,15,0,2,21,109,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20826607987415294,0.0,0.2352651890696944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17973358777048334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032975764056676,0.0,0.0716106659425245,0.0,0.09996117150323217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175635490704246,0.0,0.12998203126372154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20235925446032368,0.11923298100312488,0.0,0.0,0.134634640519738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626137371296424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05939805720659065,0.08392298720937055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06137497866746325,0.0,0.2670512558636253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20776259706847697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19151292411669624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05739154670954812,0.0,0.0,0.10396022117254124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841437565369179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838551029570565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4688305499941466,0.0,0.08635643147638056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746401276368397,0.11809316662078817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271145198908202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394985802405522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12209979402538194,0.0,0.09442063172802707,0.0,0.0,0.13434101762621728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229390390899285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942300382905274,0.0,0.1056226527749263,0.10889897560536453,0.10600142971827524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929989276681413,0.11971538324113147,0.08344969984793425,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Witch-Needleworker,2020/01/05,How to cope with being falsely accused of violence? It really hurts to have people think of me as a person who would hurt someone. This happened two years ago but I really need to figure out a way to put the lingering doubts that I'm not good enough put down. To grow and move past it.,4.0915517241379336,4.968460741379314,5.120172413793104,84.17956896551725,70.89655172413794,8.558620689655173,24.84482758620689,8.841846274778883,1.6321586206896552,225,6,46,4,4,74,48,58,0.231,0.769,0.0,-0.9092,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,11,7,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,3,0,1,0,0,2,1,11,5,1,10,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,1,3,30,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19310282583297503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250878959402725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18271462264711694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926360001617323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4664064062672416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315304158560214,0.0,0.16152627692723168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079538009161004,0.1510234605228426,0.19021028293952902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379805717727668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791089343345175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457589888143647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958366118397345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21279891872853504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17291197728283433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474793461601594,0.0,0.0,0.1402824059420566
mentalhealth,uncultred_swine,2020/01/05,"Guilty Party I feel so disconnected. I stopped taking my meds a while back because I realized the only reason I was taking them was to make other people happy. I've been on and off meds since I was eight years old and I can't recall a single time that I felt like they helped (the exception to this is my sleep meds, which do work). Since I made my stand and decided to stop taking them, no one will take me seriously. My mom won't hear anything I say because she feels like I'm choosing to be this low. So I'm left feeling guilty for every single emotion that I feel.

So I'm slowly moving further and further away from reality, trying to figure out if I'm still alive, sending out all sorts of signals only to receive no response. It's like ""the boy who cried wolf"", except every time I call there are really wolves, it's just that people are sick of saving me. 

I don't know why I'm burdening this sub with my so-called selfishness, but I'm honestly so hopeless at this point that it doesn't matter to me either way. As long as someone hears me. For once. 

Because otherwise, I think it's gonna be a long, long time till people see how far gone I am. 

But of course, this is still all ""my fault"" because I'm the one who refuses to poison themselves to comfort others. It's ""my fault"" that I keep getting worse and that I can't function. 

Yeah. It's my fault that I didn't get a childhood and that I was cursed with a genetic predisposition to mental illness and addiction.

That's like saying it's the Spaceman's fault if he gets lost in space, not NASA, even if NASA put him there.

I didn't sign up for this, but people keep treating me as if I did. And the sad thing is, I'm starting to see their point.

After all, it's ""my fault"" that I'm this low, isn't it?
I'm the ""guilty party"" here, right?


[I'm new here, so I'm sorry if this isn't how the sub works or whatever. I just needed to write this somewhere public]",3.0734456831734502,4.050289791979953,4.474107683000606,87.49105263157897,73.3859649122807,7.1074583009247245,24.284936479128863,7.372421405659032,0.9276970184080886,1493,42,322,16,29,497,194,399,0.188,0.746,0.066,-0.9928,0,0,0,0,0,1,55.0,0,0,4,3,17,23,1,0,13,1,25,5,1,5,3,57,64,29,0,6,15,1,5,4,0,3,4,4,0,1,34,12,0,5,12,0,0,5,12,14,0,3,12,11,41,9,36,47,6,44,0,5,2,0,22,18,0,7,23,196,75,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991922088756748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487677426950146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548782290821215,0.06996546657339428,0.0,0.22186591817224613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092910661914762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999479182346812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235117108123806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06009784191169025,0.0,0.15332550138648993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18402851483555488,0.06500306332826522,0.08736438575095776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426150959738447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686023276371752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20510402060144686,0.0,0.060988481182941576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16175166079718648,0.0,0.0,0.05000556220137516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886058055610096,0.0,0.0,0.17781189489648194,0.0,0.0,0.2415690765501474,0.0,0.0,0.09932601132531184,0.0,0.0,0.0860966587718325,0.06073633453664973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032071497963037,0.0,0.09169622148580413,0.0,0.0,0.10656604261973836,0.0,0.0967076564661759,0.0,0.06746771322284076,0.0,0.08787842394068462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547838912838516,0.09690106608673944,0.12331395768221498,0.13840354138912325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523232186937966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202936311739098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146978490333514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0582903348539919,0.09355257090380524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770471078597323,0.0,0.14471733071839896,0.0,0.0,0.1450140285835973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15053524823370792,0.0,0.09105541653061223,0.0,0.07709528164999993,0.0,0.0,0.1018555251471415,0.0644029814170672,0.0,0.14532899166511706,0.15214293501436935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736517369667363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060449516820795676,0.05830252886715805,0.0,0.0,0.1591704858604867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06177603687474205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222339249092083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210405608744037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248317763166167,0.0,0.0927262827141348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058594386711287985
mentalhealth,Eien_ni_Hitori_de_ii,2020/01/05,"Anxiety without worry? I’m a generally healthy 16 year old with a good home life and not much to worry about, and I’m generally a calm person. But since I was about 7, I’ve often (mostly daily, or at least once a week) felt mildly anxious with no cause.
I never really minded, but recently I’ve been tired (even though I shouldn’t be at my age, and I sleep enough each night), and I figure maybe the two are related.
Is this anxiety or is it something else? What do?",3.2537142857142847,4.362514431578951,5.104962406015041,82.63473684210527,73.10526315789474,8.375939849624057,24.09774436090225,8.841846274778883,1.6036165413533836,361,10,75,7,7,124,70,95,0.12300000000000001,0.78,0.09699999999999999,-0.51,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,0,8,3,1,1,1,23,11,9,0,1,6,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,3,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,1,6,2,8,6,5,9,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,7,50,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27904007229839384,0.20603724444174146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18735427777670255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523549077076643,0.0,0.0,0.18844707085095855,0.0,0.12046012777204433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751131943431636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15297151050993882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18294179445721265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12882023558997635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832250073048461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18415159197944192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13407012668868465,0.0,0.14066253336724774,0.0,0.0,0.17115107325576487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913769045280309,0.1942285185416177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15924699333987166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168371602212434,0.0,0.18007803499348107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086644261764687,0.0,0.18251149726360905,0.0,0.0,0.14040486858159754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17918721253809036,0.0,0.0,0.20961873343629486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781585488954261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146294062358818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175807604274901,0.0,0.0,0.3704310487069616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744660183202592
mentalhealth,StanBCool,2020/01/05,"Don't let go I know how it feels like to be the outcast, to feel like nothing. Just don't let go. I recommend a song from King Iso 'Keep Breathing' .. go check it out.",-1.4758333333333304,0.5060008611111115,0.65688888888889,103.17700000000002,95.94444444444444,3.991111111111112,18.31111111111111,5.6839178017228535,-0.5992155555555554,125,4,32,1,5,41,27,36,0.057999999999999996,0.8029999999999999,0.138,0.4386,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,5,1,1,1,0,7,12,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,1,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,4,9,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791756844580732,0.39444484378425937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4706859574662358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24538116093387136,0.0,0.0,0.151719281837974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5645947150249796,0.0,0.2697449224478639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648938689744311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kleinmanns1969,2020/01/05,"I feel insane. I don't know what is wrong with me.  To start off, I'am 14 years old and extremly lonely. I only have my family and 1 or 2 ""friends"" who do not really support me. Now, that isn't the main problem. My problem is that...sometimes.. I want to get out. What I mean with that is.. complicated..
When I see for example an happy couple I get jealous. If I could kill them I would do it.
I always felt attached to fire and for me it also made fun to hurt small animals.One part of me tells me to be destructive and violent and to be honest it does feel wonderful just to think about it. Maybe tell isnt the right word its more like an urge but an urge you do enjoy. However I do not always think like that. I need help..seriously.. if feel instable, but I dont know what to do.",1.153495934959352,2.861281341463414,3.4959512195121967,89.47181300813011,80.09756097560975,7.300162601626017,21.29918699186992,8.238735603445708,1.0016508943089435,596,17,136,12,15,206,98,164,0.127,0.733,0.14,0.495,1,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,1,0,5,17,4,0,5,0,17,0,0,1,0,34,35,12,1,8,8,0,5,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,12,8,0,0,10,0,0,0,6,9,0,0,2,6,22,8,16,29,3,9,0,2,1,0,6,4,0,4,7,91,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287128714094298,0.25569288509316324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267446414339818,0.17000725721414453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13445734646759136,0.0,0.18007290045033872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484452492540906,0.0,0.233065309674686,0.0,0.1475250190640693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870713334674556,0.0,0.16054821860203194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635598712472029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298620853181527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16448207277044102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16998741495621028,0.0,0.16888052159140834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15012812691889274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538431327010176,0.0,0.0,0.15435885797783644,0.16736640379696602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139271522812673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122646608566388,0.0,0.0,0.11685531184394135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16638450714916295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29403846637658065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843007178118764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121352415555698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243660358544987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519606098473499,0.0,0.10875199292786858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435656314893616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685881436826342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19690132560719464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906248610514766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16662339598040815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109146275439462,0.1679886513985862,0.0,0.09894349902798287
mentalhealth,guubet,2020/01/05,"Stuck I’ve been having horrible mental health issues for years now and they’re getting easier to deal with, but I’m in such a good relationship now, but I can’t stop panicking myself that I’m going to ruin it or that my boyfriend will suddenly leave me, I’m so anxious and it’s stupid but it’s the way I’ve always been about everything, just nice to say that.",1.4067000000000007,3.7002453200000014,3.327583333333333,87.90337500000004,82.46666666666667,6.95,20.041666666666664,8.07648339933343,1.0079666666666658,289,8,60,6,8,97,55,75,0.285,0.607,0.10800000000000001,-0.9379,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,9,11,7,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,6,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,1,4,2,7,7,0,8,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,5,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305693119458716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130440097604369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856778259353284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.249039519521557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477325907491848,0.0,0.15748225698334464,0.2324182463170266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945442322654647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28922029919291803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934087803880527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792515211388996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297501587161576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22036095971811956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316679212342291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21994899994896505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784432483061611
mentalhealth,WeakTV,2020/01/05,"So i am a bit lost.. So i don’t really know how to start this, or if this is even the place to express myself but here goes.
So i can’t figure out if i’m actually depressed or pretending/fooling myself. Because i have no reason to be, everything is going great for me at the moment, but i have had semi-suicidal thoughts since the 23. Dec incl. hallucinations (semi-suicidal= thoughts of suicide, but lacking the will power to actually follow through)

I also recently carved the word “HELP” into my wrist, but it’s just exactly covered by my watch. So i can’t decide if i am looking for attention or something else

Also whenever i think about something, i spiral, quickly. 
Example:
I recently got a text from a friend who asked me not to commit suicide (don’t do something stupid) and instantly i thought of insurance, so if i actually did it, they would have a clear conscience or be “off the hook”


So i am a bit stuck, i don’t know why i feel this way, and i don’t think i can tell anybody without (what i percieve to be) negative repercussions",5.951666666666667,5.986661658536588,7.304695121951222,73.11883130081304,66.5609756097561,10.540650406504065,36.107723577235774,10.317481424215053,3.817626016260162,820,39,152,19,12,282,120,205,0.145,0.768,0.087,-0.919,1,0,3,0,0,3,30.0,0,0,1,2,14,5,1,0,11,0,23,1,1,2,3,38,40,23,2,6,15,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,12,0,0,2,10,3,0,0,8,3,26,2,19,27,3,13,0,2,2,0,7,5,0,8,5,117,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.3511955815902455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19186645855077009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112147880275564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312746350688741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26193394322180674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033227299387588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021250391678416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923348980221294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781372966663864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06065617745045426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268201631935513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817692836186484,0.0,0.0959442313148652,0.13225806144014515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804077159536251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185549020407905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073751104863507,0.0,0.13095223147950869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253343147777895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685045760891028,0.12334048007197362,0.2368951687691935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923345561497574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770568468263611,0.0,0.0,0.08490942118753002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5248739759511432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485170526048117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373306859262126,0.0,0.28570827537881266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521991556401382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824666383667753,0.0,0.0,0.11563867877367147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521726198145432,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,benhsu75,2020/01/05,"What anxiety questions would you like our therapists to create video responses for? What questions would you ask a licensed therapist if you had the chance?

I'm part of a group of mental health advocates and therapists creating short video answers to our community's questions about anxiety, therapy, CBT, relationships, and mental health. We wanted to ask reddit and hear your questions, and we'll create fun and engaging videos about them from licensed mental health professionals! 

I'll add the link to our passion project in the comments.",10.70241758241758,11.326638802197804,9.143164835164836,61.92683516483522,56.58241758241758,12.994285714285715,43.47472527472527,12.340626583579946,5.982545494505493,445,23,62,13,5,136,57,91,0.034,0.76,0.205,0.9418,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,5,4,1,0,2,4,0,0,5,0,4,4,0,0,0,17,9,6,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,3,3,1,0,0,2,7,0,0,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,10,4,11,5,1,2,0,0,0,1,20,2,0,5,1,38,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899684802291293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23215100729368185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3959379091047444,0.1399405554085739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06065969661905572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37538084702471736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13445626656265444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5563632303327819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330443384808208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199103944598532,0.4324879147967444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323446565741236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17640345193501433,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,game_rage_help,2020/01/05,"I can't stop raging when playing competitive videogames and it's killing me Hey, I could use some advice.

I have rage problems in games, especially competitive ones such as League of Legends. Most of the time, I destroy keyboards. 

Today I destroyed my 2nd 120€ keyboard in +- 2 months of time. My fourth (or fifth) one in +- 2 years. It's the tipping point for me. I can't keep going on like this. I have to do something about it. It's not financially or mentally viable.

Fortunately, it's only in games. I've never, ever hit anyone over an argument or out of frustration. In real life, I always manage to de-escalate. When I notice I'm too frustrated or angry, and I just go for a walk to avoid issues, but for some reasons, when I'm in game, my brains seems to think that it's okay to hit my keyboard, tell strangers that they are piece of shit, etc. (Got banned multiple times for telling terrible things in chat)

Another example: In real life/when I'm working, I always blame myself, I try hard to notice my mistakes and to improve and do better. That's how I got this far in school. However, in game, I always blame everybody but myself. e.g. I died because of poor play on my part ? Meh, it was lag/a terrible jungler/a bug.

In short, when game, I seem to subconsciously think that's it's perfectly okay to be a trash human being, possibly because there's no one in front of me ?

Also, do note that I don't always act like this. I'd say 95% of my playtime is perfectly fine. I laugh at my mistakes, don't trash talk beyond measure, etc. But it's that 5% where I completely snap that's the issue.

Unfortunately, a therapist isn't an option. I already went to a therapist and they straight up told me they can't do anything about it because they don't know how to handle those issues. They recommended me to go to a ""gaming addiction clinic"" but that thing isn't what I need. I mean, people that go there are people that have much bigger issues that pale in comparison to my rage problem. I'm not really addicted either. If I can't find a solution, I'll just uninstall League and every single game that triggers this rage.

I love League. I watch league videos daily, I follow every developer update, I buy skins, but it's just can't continue like this. I have to do something about it. Even if it means uninstalling it for ever. (But wouldn't that be curing the ""cause"" and not the issue?)

Thank you.",3.425783945157012,5.047774548319332,4.863330384785495,82.50566342326407,73.47478991596641,7.783635559486952,26.18177797434763,8.452757503120043,1.8039378151260503,1879,65,368,33,38,628,231,476,0.174,0.706,0.11900000000000001,-0.9790000000000001,1,1,2,0,0,0,87.0,0,1,5,4,22,31,10,1,13,2,28,8,3,6,5,63,55,27,2,9,19,0,2,3,0,1,4,1,0,1,36,8,0,4,9,11,2,9,16,17,0,3,5,4,50,14,52,43,10,51,0,0,1,1,22,26,1,12,19,234,86,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17836100745582228,0.0,0.07993977665352738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902748425781872,0.0654201470044089,0.2722762415858549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857806167481583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057200585901797114,0.0,0.06731928366717511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14960434821642002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235066881720681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132243690436284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403719162710384,0.0,0.0,0.08577192753818162,0.0,0.0,0.06531535287607475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490160654682036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182470401168338,0.0540320240409451,0.14799623627452999,0.1378499945002731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07476910865258535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18596870800373047,0.0,0.13085529934212256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732820162130747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4269205179019607,0.0,0.07271284081796882,0.09050610548726924,0.0,0.04495838208326917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155638499658498,0.11989868863257618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383301678089563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822121009340874,0.0,0.0,0.08244110414256052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529668723940688,0.0,0.0601367476724255,0.060658036742830414,0.06309375164321551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18627311395684784,0.0,0.0,0.1663013807349409,0.06221707167686483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858781551192291,0.0,0.11342781857779045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773330155296247,0.09222385833352732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565543923475108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18622604282782326,0.05240695296203272,0.08411008780638687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505533346778054,0.0,0.08279193609519044,0.0,0.14894603408849652,0.0,0.0,0.08397257862412047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12595635377413594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839339367989253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0657524819891662,0.1430039210316388,0.07531587982817567,0.0,0.18996590532925894,0.10869640713302894,0.10483583240899706,0.0,0.0,0.14310503081392334,0.0,0.07754242590781132,0.0781690411694618,0.0,0.05554083480194131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065403013238379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583488694245784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05955566798333154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05268031614348035
mentalhealth,murrgrace,2020/01/05,"I’m scared to try antidepressants I have struggled for about 7 months now. I was good for the first half of the year, but then everything with school, my sorority, and trying to be the best I could for my friends took a huge toll on me. I cried all of fall semester. One friend who is still with me now, I met because I broke down before class and she sat with me. I was so overwhelmed. I almost failed my classes. I started drinking heavier than I ever had before. My brain kept me up at night. I reached out to my friends and I just wanted to die. I never hit the point I would do something to myself, but I wanted to just disappear, just wreck, just go to sleep and never wake up. I’ve never struggled with any of this before. I kept telling myself to keep going.

I recently fell prey to a huge wall of insecurity and anxiety, became obsessed with everyone I loved leaving me, lashed out, and consequently lost a good handful of friends. My heart is so heavy. My roommate comes in from work and I’m either on the couch or in bed. I can’t sleep and now am taking sleep aid pills. I’ve had two weeks to set up my planner and buy books for classes but I just haven’t. It’s like the entire semester I barely held on, and now I’m just broken. And I need to get back on my feet because university classes start again Monday.  

I keep telling myself I just have to keep going, but multiple people (roommate, sisters) who have seen me this semester, and now the past three weeks are telling me it may be a good thing to get on anti anxiety or antidepressants. They mentioned it a few months back but I blew them off.

I have an appointment with my counselor on Friday, she’s been with me through all last semester. So I know she is willing to help if I just ask. But I’m terrified. I am so scared I won’t be myself anymore. Im so overwhelmed. Im afraid to go to school even Monday because even though I’ve apologized, I’ve lost my closest friends and Im terrified I’ll see them again. What if the medicine doesn’t work and I’m worse?

I just don’t know if I should keep “going” and eventually things will fix, or if an antidepressant might be what I actually need? Any advice or experience?",2.635896885069819,4.449147405895693,3.8399075068623967,88.20259667024703,76.0748299319728,6.909678959303019,25.437462704380003,7.7627490962704995,1.2869873015873017,1710,61,360,25,38,557,201,441,0.151,0.718,0.131,-0.8554,0,0,2,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,3,8,29,24,0,9,15,0,32,11,8,0,6,74,71,36,1,11,24,1,1,1,5,7,1,0,2,0,11,25,1,7,2,2,1,10,8,13,0,5,14,3,62,11,52,44,5,61,0,6,2,1,23,21,0,11,30,243,73,10,0.0,0.0,0.07672183060723113,0.0,0.0,0.07682660583546448,0.0,0.0,0.07872662639350261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069286640147592,0.0,0.12028825063940035,0.0,0.07796996669510092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349913658794882,0.0,0.0,0.12090793559565476,0.0,0.14377816367325708,0.0,0.20069962327815166,0.0,0.082506895106759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877659803128306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772421412737432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277171491438045,0.0,0.08636043646019195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08159520246398437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701772093128148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385560698968656,0.0711163389827527,0.0,0.07512482978894391,0.07065863414764048,0.07690549779750505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687417688231075,0.0,0.0,0.3037082894462459,0.0,0.08215146549422063,0.0,0.2234079394770043,0.19782831095202272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316514129506297,0.052697364257612234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547694453877553,0.0,0.0,0.27952446176630474,0.0,0.0,0.08641505002651567,0.06408583643879391,0.0,0.08324728424217122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038409786622613136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17164615014317436,0.0,0.07095766732566683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340345196362936,0.0,0.0,0.12550755238273886,0.0,0.0,0.116591546153361,0.18190989483932166,0.0,0.0,0.07377959383187242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05327498258675311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750517365920566,0.05450524553265661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432136229142404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762781750136194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15742477677854974,0.159135381833957,0.06265000323430779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23603049425754755,0.0,0.0,0.06052555779470563,0.0,0.0,0.1112953562765778,0.0,0.06278607584927225,0.0,0.0,0.16438149918891404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05911249543749032,0.0,0.2061521748110642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446333948034496,0.0,0.07724380285462455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734977164234188,0.10675571040422988,0.0,0.07680036779867272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274428841896463,0.0,0.12612852838753266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11447266982628755,0.0,0.08012055066240646,0.05584942990126818,0.0,0.0,0.05062873644474005
mentalhealth,Truetree9999,2020/01/06,"Science of happiness Good article that talks about the underlying neurobiological processes that go on when we experience happiness 

-https://www.independent.co.uk/life-style/health-and-families/features/everything-you-need-to-know-about-happiness-science-a6792031.html",14.434714285714286,20.1287964,11.422500000000005,28.753750000000025,56.42857142857142,16.071428571428573,51.60714285714285,12.602617957971056,10.265999999999998,234,15,21,11,4,70,30,35,0.0,0.627,0.373,0.8779,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150087271088306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18301799651816544,0.2701048525085997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6856173164553051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3423045637509992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17698016196172214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274604638351461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387823731544212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588368258064698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,U_L_C_P,2020/01/06,I just don't know anymore. I've been thinking of hanging myself a lot and I don't know who to talk to. I don't want to talk to a therapist because I'm scared of what they'll think. I told my friend but she doesn't understand. Can somebody help me? Please.,-1.0244642857142845,1.076906910714289,1.047142857142859,100.0228571428572,95.96428571428572,4.228571428571429,19.5,5.985473137389443,-0.19513571428571366,201,7,48,2,8,66,39,56,0.062,0.765,0.17300000000000001,0.7607,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,10,15,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,2,0,9,1,6,12,1,1,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,1,0,29,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608126508029179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031456548663692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203183270171314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17627478688173362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890617916359639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235823259346238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28868098881874243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26329608100403995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42275832375589256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053484266989361,0.0,0.33702317720936953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512955542868481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27377896586760264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15511667334661294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,P0TaSh1,2020/01/06,"Is that supposed to be like that? I recently started to get nostalgia and missing the past way too often, i got to a point where sometimes i miss a memory a day after it occurred, i miss everything i do even if in the moment it doesn't feel so fun, and it's sometimes not even triggered i just randomly think of that and i start to get sad and i miss those so much, as the time went it started to get from shorter and shorter times when the memory occurred, is it normal?",8.6609793814433,5.407399608247425,8.952036082474226,74.07279639175258,63.22680412371135,12.174226804123714,39.7139175257732,10.125756701596842,3.8201154639175265,370,15,76,6,4,124,59,97,0.111,0.8170000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.1825,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,0,7,0,5,0,0,1,0,14,19,10,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,1,8,2,10,16,1,16,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,3,12,56,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589668954782466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783565758344729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18938116125430887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065461454522798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302768328679543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16853168885116165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029469375097396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549031288484864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20646043752477744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011556719346919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991981031977265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20806015289408772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4168140834621538,0.0,0.4474451863128927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502059127014818,0.0,0.0,0.24574455037913764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672593856070836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195339151482652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Juriloso,2020/01/06,"School makes me feel like shit Tomorrow I’ll start the second term of ESO (school) and I don’t think I can take it. I fucking hate this shit. It feels like I’ll never be able to get used to this, even though I’ve been doing this for three years. This school year is being one of the worst ones so far. I’ve got a shit ton of crappy classmates, the boys are horny as fuck and disrespectful and the girls play the angel role but they’re bitches. I’ve got some teachers who don’t care about their students, they don’t even care about us understanding what they’re saying and they couldn’t give less fucks. I’ve been hating subjects I used to kinda like. When I have school I don’t have life, at all. Just study, study, study, study fucking memorise do homework, wake up at seven, feel like fucking shit, having anxiety attacks. I can’t do this anymore. I’m fed up. I just want to fucking learn something useful. I don’t see the point. 75% of the things we do are fucking useless and I don’t care. I don’t feel like a human being. I am a machine. I’m not treated with basic respect. I need my sleep, eating when I’m hungry, going to the fucking bathroom if I’m about to pee myself. My classmates are fucking jerks and I can’t stress this enough. I feel sick at the thought of going back there. My mental health is going downhill and I’m anxious as fuck.",1.5402552862300145,3.7089368664259936,2.538972408457969,94.47967057761736,81.05776173285199,4.679164517792676,20.72318205260445,5.543175910156928,-0.13488540484785982,1060,30,226,5,28,335,143,277,0.20800000000000002,0.669,0.12300000000000001,-0.9801,0,0,1,0,0,0,36.0,2,0,3,0,13,33,19,1,12,0,29,22,7,4,2,34,74,15,0,4,5,0,5,5,0,0,3,1,1,3,11,9,2,0,9,1,0,3,12,22,0,5,6,7,25,11,23,64,7,19,1,1,1,10,12,7,15,3,14,132,36,7,0.0716767429590379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054832512175791166,0.0809743175699663,0.07108406889998922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154264270648888,0.0,0.05511499099419909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21923764935372886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334320216559229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406123587781799,0.0,0.09468362544996373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812095744262215,0.20482351796650844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6626399388198184,0.03744813984762923,0.06875886310189579,0.1222066344444328,0.0,0.1146528782788469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153188878024167,0.0,0.07618902600984992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05062740328508955,0.17508818038826165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047844782504188416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722332983528477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05314739669141435,0.055281522901050636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714003207546404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06775769006704728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570002228948342,0.0,0.29016276205288816,0.05711708411915872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943005864999161,0.0,0.0,0.07172850704559054,0.0,0.0,0.05518025853869535,0.0,0.0,0.05073316758457841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210546688914235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05389199042447304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047618843100072666,0.045927562708120144,0.07042203603455327,0.05690332753959435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461801723646581,0.0862182964551349,0.185717077353486,0.0,0.0,0.04227680007761495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231494490258453
mentalhealth,ash_1991,2020/01/06,Fuckibf hammers So ducking hammered and want to die why am I always s in pain my head hasn’t stopped hurting for five years since I was fifteen never a child always in agony not one moment I wasn’t in pain finally thought I was getting better but only friends ghosted I get it I wouldnff tv want to know me what’s the point I live in agony I doe in agony no pain be ever going to love me why would they do ducking wasted,0.3441062308478031,2.6743645955056192,2.1497242083758934,94.06092951991829,88.43820224719101,3.685801838610828,23.821246169560776,4.851557810540192,0.20027191011235998,335,14,69,1,11,110,64,89,0.293,0.569,0.138,-0.9371,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,1,1,2,7,0,0,2,0,8,5,1,0,2,11,16,3,2,3,2,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,5,4,0,2,4,0,12,3,9,10,0,13,0,1,0,1,4,6,0,0,6,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861690776825068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208469196240146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17846738516555813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048340047572448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554771209007626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883738318155644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328559097442044,0.0,0.17968405974289434,0.0,0.09772886047138628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764806240066773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18408679241455608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450474753090073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184387652375694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520066085563014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262619323746486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652458171416599,0.13078336849497474,0.5489328587945332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625578317052057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224713214439982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437663034788139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13651707330185664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028529882069825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31033440082363817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12215548728941475,0.0,0.0,0.1107366356682208
mentalhealth,M1rrOreD_ImAg3,2020/01/06,"Having to watch by as one of my parents is essentially destroying their health and unable to seek help is simply horrible As the title says, one of my parents has issues for which they're unable (or even unwilling) to seek treatment of any kind - even if those issues have started to treaten their health. Actually, in the near past, they have started to sometimes (even) make death-related *extremely disturbing* jokes. In fact, if they don't seek help **or** do some self-helping, they might not live for even 15 years I fear (the parent is about in their mid-fifties).

Having to watch by that kind of self-destructive behaviour is then extremely stressful for me - especially when they have existed for as long as I can remember, and as a byproduct of them I've developed deep issues of my own (""hunger"" for love and warmth, complex PTSD symptoms etc.).

This topic, however, is a strict taboo in our family *and* the parent has sort of made it clear that even the pushing of others doesn't really help. Behind the issues there are *even deeper* mental blocks, but the parent is (seemingly) unwilling to go talk about those anywhere.

I know that I can do nothing to fix the situation (or the parent, for that matter, them being an adult and therefore responsible of their own life). Still, their constant issues and the subsequent constant ""problem-talk"" about them is stressing me out so much that I've reduced the amount of visits to my parents because I can't take the stress (additionally, I don't really have anything concrete to talk with them most of the time).

*TL;DR* : The issues of a parent are so stressful to me that I'm forced to keep slight distance to them in order not to worsen my own situation...",5.956363636363638,7.405816031847133,6.098019687319052,76.76410538506082,67.02547770700636,9.021192819918936,30.514765489287786,9.339509955726095,2.7937566878980897,1350,51,233,26,22,429,160,314,0.07,0.8420000000000001,0.08900000000000001,0.2418,9,0,0,0,0,0,65.0,1,0,14,0,15,11,1,6,18,0,27,6,0,3,2,34,38,21,0,2,8,8,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,12,9,1,3,4,1,0,3,6,7,0,2,1,3,29,4,51,35,8,23,0,0,2,1,32,8,0,10,11,172,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.06559904685476586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04571331513667369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531803881503487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04097795208501902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452863607918257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749703813273558,0.2663972734406241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337098830325143,0.07564352155881192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03820385351466684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14290784141161894,0.0,0.0,0.18023015559964767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42097427947084615,0.0,0.059750067612218814,0.0,0.14000289031925872,0.036943493597453685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04748093852001918,0.0,0.0,0.05935832248357415,0.059489419709845434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067054587671152,0.06360715132629542,0.04487125606250696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774403930765807,0.0713119969884513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04941595870805834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450139253171877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110283347607884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5971372595825812,0.0,0.06417107551093597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432244581923972,0.07857900665215611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612836323286696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07614950513800507,0.0,0.0,0.053457690959514234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06119645104802631,0.14025456654153318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112085426174088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648434957517722,0.0,0.09516025925503624,0.0,0.05368363474730621,0.0,0.30801063238959225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986947325945238,0.05054263339671384,0.16209166910528744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03919773165506491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043288811384579615
mentalhealth,vanillalube,2020/01/06,"My (f26) depressed boyfriend (m28) was talking in his sleep and said something very concerning. A little background. My boyfriend has a past of undiagnosed mental health issues. He’s attempted suicide twice 3-4 years ago, we’ve been together for almost 2 years, so this was before I knew him. In the time we’ve been together I’ve witnessed mental breakdowns, moodiness, forgetfulness and more. He has never seeked help for these issues. I myself have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression, but it is under control. 


SO..

In the past week he has had 3 mental breakdowns of anger, heavy crying, and sadness. He’s been forgetful and absent minded, losing and misplacing things. He’s finally told his family how he’s been feeling and that he’s going to go to therapy, which is a HIGE step for him, considering he refused it before. 

With how he’s been lately, his sister and I asked if he’s suicidal and he says no he isn’t l, he just wants to feel better. 

Here’s the part about talking in his sleep:

I’ve noticed he only talks in his sleep when he’s stressed and tired. He’s said a few random things over the past couple weeks that weren’t anything that grabbed my attention. 

But lastnight around 2am he was sleeping and said “End me.” I responded to him and asked “what?”  He opened his eyes said “End me.”  I told him “No”. And he said “No?... open the door please”. 

After that I woke him up and just told him “cuddle me, I’m cold” to stop the talking”. He happily turned over and said okay. 

This worried me because the “door” in our room leads to a balcony, and we’re on the third floor. 
I’m also concerned because two weeks ago when we stayed at my family’s house for the holidays, I found him on the couch in the living room at 5am. We fell asleep together in a different room and he didn’t remember how he got there. 

This morning I told him about what he said lastnight. He seemed disturbed and said “from now on if I say something in my sleep. Can you not tell me? I don’t want to think a little that stuff”. 

Should  be concerned about this? 
Is there anything that I can do?
Should he mention these incidents when he goes to therapy?

What was said lastnight gave me a very uneasy feeling. 

Any insights would be helpful. Thank you.",3.0735437665782506,5.174082501149428,3.8151724137931033,87.57591511936342,75.71264367816093,6.944297082228117,25.636604774535808,7.882392219407189,1.4759230769230762,1748,63,345,27,39,555,204,435,0.146,0.789,0.065,-0.9892,2,0,2,0,0,1,60.0,3,2,0,5,19,11,1,2,19,1,30,11,7,5,1,60,63,31,2,7,7,1,4,0,0,3,3,11,6,0,21,25,0,3,10,1,0,5,9,8,0,3,31,17,42,3,40,27,3,55,0,4,1,1,74,27,0,5,22,200,63,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113335970935597,0.0,0.06401428558763059,0.0,0.0,0.05112290139242131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04347297953256075,0.0,0.048904460803254765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052139824905466,0.05690914278412928,0.1195274060511129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779393779231349,0.0,0.10879540667423457,0.0,0.0,0.056538792359615474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170027120762074,0.0,0.07073470498103561,0.07022149806601402,0.0,0.0,0.11012154545724774,0.06488519723279164,0.0,0.06679076545081628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132418082010852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053055741981165,0.0,0.09697118929685908,0.0,0.0,0.07002959223297983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.070093344975955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726630889465135,0.0,0.05112876438883776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795207967476463,0.0,0.0,0.08569868365604434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376390016867282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344767041035527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211314940760531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12814455623852125,0.056449267148979035,0.0,0.0,0.07151866420578575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932720406824408,0.0,0.06454868103807769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04930492809067895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278202872452587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04861984214201183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922739193295957,0.18307846481459467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017333895541675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241754111207101,0.0,0.5472883256060457,0.1016756320556813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058197312006844464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198689812023419,0.0,0.0,0.09842922323776072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813834610923504,0.0,0.053446359892076634,0.07322888242544866,0.0,0.07318184004901322,0.13985289934821024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20553042492017395,0.055875565008569716,0.0588559713490064,0.14621362901096294,0.0,0.08494135152582004,0.04096224304017817,0.0,0.0,0.03727671425423205,0.07347540479419662,0.0,0.2443423542522579,0.0,0.0,0.06953490249660398,0.0624480039691508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054939770640666,0.0754123431607272,0.0,0.15383666251473166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06492160983396662,0.0,0.04541235309304703,0.0,0.0,0.08233459357232029
mentalhealth,local_bitch,2020/01/06,"How to get a diagnosis? I've been thinking for a long time now that I should try and get some sort of diagnosis in terms of my mental health. I've always had issues with mental health but my parents never took me to a doctor because they dont take mental illness very seriously and assume its just for 'attention-seekers'.

I'm 16 now and live in ontario, meaning i am old enough to go to a doctor on my own and am currently under OHIP+ (Ontario Health Insurance Plan (+ because people 24 and under get extra help)) 

I can't afford therapy because it isn't covered by OHIP or OHIP+ at all, at least according to google. Medications to help mental illness however ARE covered.

long paragraph describing my mental health concerns (dont have to read if u dont want to its just in case it makes a difference in terms of my question): My current problems mainly consist of irritability, constant mood swings, panic attacks (VERY often when I was younger (ages 7-13, few times a week) now only about once a month or less/when under a lot of stress), disassociation and manic/depressive episodes. I also tend to spend a lot of time in my own head (daydreaming, talking to myself and most of all just staring into space without actually thinking about anything (this tends to happen without me noticing until someone snaps me out of it)). these things tend to impact my day-to-day life and has become a huge reason a few friendships have turned sour. when i was younger i used to experience many agoraphobic symptoms such as panic attacks when forced to leave the house and faking illnesses to get out of school for long periods of time (this was enough for my step mother to say that i have a 'complex' (in her words) but they still didnt want to do anything because of religious views) but this has calmed down a lot since I started high school and doesn't affect me much any more.

It's been affecting my social and school life and I know I can't talk to my parents about it because of their views, but in ontario at 16 I can go to the doctor and receive prescriptions without parental consent (I got pretty sick a few months back and my parents refused to take me to the doctor, so i went to a walk-in clinic and got a prescription for antibiotics on my own, and I've since been taking care of medical needs on my own, which is only financially possible because of OHIP (thanks, canadian healthcare!))

I'm just looking for genuine advice since I'm told all the time that I should 'get some help' but I'm not actually sure... uh... how... keep in mind i dont make a lot of money and use most of what I do make for grocery, things like shampoo and deodorant and etc., and saving up for driving school and similar, so I wouldnt be able to afford therapy.

those of you who have gotten diagnosis, how did you go about it? what kinds of questions do you ask? how do i make it not seem like im 'self-diagnosing'? (ie. saying 'i think i might be depressed or bipolar or something'). and how do i make it professional so that i'm taken seriously? (often, because i'm young and without a parent backing me up, professionals will assume i am exaggerating). thanks! i could really use some advice",6.333284313725487,6.506589746732029,6.946862745098037,75.53588235294119,65.74836601307189,9.479738562091505,33.66666666666667,9.225670689056813,2.962203921568628,2503,102,461,41,36,825,285,612,0.099,0.833,0.068,-0.9515,10,0,1,0,0,0,85.0,0,3,3,1,29,20,2,3,22,0,42,20,1,16,5,105,95,47,0,9,20,6,0,2,0,5,19,2,0,0,25,27,0,2,12,1,2,8,17,10,1,0,16,7,52,9,84,71,29,66,0,1,4,0,28,26,0,23,34,313,77,11,0.05265830573897006,0.0,0.10277382069862166,0.0,0.0,0.10291417384758704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0421108280745325,0.04381592874374424,0.0,0.0,0.035809453632745604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08666659768948679,0.0,0.04922840751717805,0.11981284955583935,0.0,0.08098197342007332,0.0,0.22470010095227014,0.05815696153572492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368865219298708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05690492129798965,0.0,0.04204337228723196,0.0,0.0,0.06792050177738655,0.0,0.09070904314400732,0.053447071876426784,0.0,0.05501672174816558,0.0,0.2155920289892122,0.0,0.0,0.2468605685899035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088202125615242,0.0587279304934381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051509927349374776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13755895678596253,0.0,0.08978078598776595,0.0,0.08423131505446238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0465655658582459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054042613609756776,0.22389326634854512,0.0,0.0,0.10588725704215672,0.05563639115482615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06076061478330819,0.0,0.0,0.056880006408720485,0.05496159013414704,0.0,0.046805121643795376,0.0,0.05483552214872972,0.02893962770047121,0.0,0.0,0.05575754251845053,0.0,0.0,0.07438823726909387,0.05145237662059515,0.0,0.04649824871239424,0.13980283055623047,0.04421971448754156,0.0,0.0,0.17907283384175635,0.0,0.0,0.1757491398960392,0.05338725697141381,0.0,0.057360332261045525,0.0,0.10609540619455188,0.2653359340959619,0.05586214086599399,0.05316987760079056,0.0,0.08406271450260945,0.0,0.03870991366045669,0.039045466474477035,0.040613331667469985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059951830100717876,0.05525603379258074,0.05607937703081914,0.0,0.08009802877724344,0.0,0.12356635183777752,0.29235408416393344,0.0,0.0,0.036506638900373374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05936432766486261,0.0,0.05357242793916959,0.0,0.0503868869326649,0.0,0.0,0.11797870769411554,0.0,0.052672555824352235,0.0,0.033734259049365035,0.054141508528097404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375199654652135,0.0,0.2131720668024352,0.0,0.047938143837107434,0.05493409723549664,0.0,0.0,0.13067848398957868,0.0,0.0,0.05367851128406948,0.04461721156996835,0.04053893640991183,0.0,0.0,0.037271819832855234,0.0,0.04205299098464802,0.0,0.060319911310146586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049629829973528834,0.05473214216794987,0.11877747752609268,0.08464950298362879,0.0,0.09696138611589207,0.12043872365872617,0.0,0.0699676769725065,0.10122394820501368,0.0,0.0,0.15352740771635354,0.0,0.0,0.050317267755702465,0.0585053152263384,0.03575153301479034,0.05727711543085379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13643960699800034,0.0,0.08689723411711821,0.0621184661090031,0.0,0.042239316563764125,0.0,0.0,0.048814776981015225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20304291046537898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snitchfigga,2020/01/06,"Tardive dyskinesia Austedo medication discussion / forum Hi, my girlfriend recently started taking Austedo (Deutetrabenazine) 9mg twice a day for treatment of tardive dyskinesia which we speculate was caused by taking long term antipsychotics such as Lithium, etc. She asked me to find a forum that focuses specifically on other patients that are like her, at a young age, that have TD and are being treated with this medication or other medications in the same drug class of vesicular monoamine transporter 2 inhibitors or VMT2 inhibitors. I've done a simple google search, but I haven't found a good place to post this, any help would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.

BTW, my girlfriend streams on live on the meetme app and is trying to find other people to talk about what she is going through any help would be a blessing.",15.059577464788733,10.983164112676057,12.521211267605633,55.875197183098614,52.23943661971831,15.021971830985914,51.63943661971831,12.340626583579946,6.3562969014084505,672,33,100,13,5,205,104,142,0.040999999999999995,0.8109999999999999,0.14800000000000002,0.9595,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,8,0,13,4,0,1,0,14,20,6,0,2,3,0,0,1,2,2,4,0,0,0,10,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,0,8,6,17,12,3,16,1,0,0,0,12,6,0,2,8,65,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22195462616847275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525640812535727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16764488508421418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524643670763444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700381614768145,0.0,0.0,0.18925288302173607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182004115337848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983121731038212,0.0,0.0,0.1789334702649432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274674129070376,0.13687913403910698,0.0,0.17992163188831026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21877059610971514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972819925867755,0.0,0.14410302815972947,0.14442129030897166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.493201455855999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131379645288731,0.0,0.17050268392621534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629445500985994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113409227118936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550934178531007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24540270745181555,0.13116891549622475,0.0,0.1502468344591697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079781091649103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23185624639895056,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,highongummyvitamins,2020/01/06,"What to tell classmates about a leave for mental health program? I have to leave my high school for a mental health program for two weeks then I have to leave school early everyday. Standard procedure. But my school isn’t exactly nice once you get in the limelight. I don’t want rumors being spread that I got pregnant or anything. I’ve been trying to figure out an alibi I can use just in case anyone asks once I get back. So I can:
1. Claim I had some sort of illness. Something with my immune system may work. Or appendicitis. Although that may not account for leaving early from school. 
2. Injury. It would need to be something that I had to get surgery for or had to go out of school for physical therapy. Foot would work buuuut I wear heels a lot. Something that I could still function normally with but go to physical therapy after. 
3. Cancer. This I refuse to do pretty much. It does run in my family but I just don’t like the thought of lying about it. 
4.something else?
My thoughts here are not to offend or anger. I mainly want to tell people something that’s easier to say if I don’t know them and also to avoid stigma of mental illness. Any thoughts are very appreciated!",1.8447950310559025,4.525703373913046,3.1587888198757774,87.04619565217392,84.82608695652173,5.894409937888199,22.127329192546586,7.310402129719878,1.0626459627329194,936,32,176,15,28,303,132,230,0.136,0.763,0.10099999999999999,-0.863,0,1,5,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,1,2,9,5,2,1,6,0,22,9,3,1,1,39,37,13,0,8,12,0,0,1,0,4,6,1,0,0,10,5,0,2,5,0,1,3,6,3,0,1,8,1,22,2,34,22,4,18,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,10,9,119,32,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366196728351375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263934770570509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440688198105138,0.0,0.07580036270335556,0.0,0.0861123257308473,0.0,0.0,0.0708284751141176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354397088628258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060786931582051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694779213286855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683503611395217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443742216095238,0.0,0.104698793200548,0.0,0.07367041515791932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19582158811476488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732143043508827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0506223697405372,0.0,0.0,0.3901334132431521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045001291313687665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831036476218707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784818222323825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677129499462083,0.06829991252895566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025024462650888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961926385685253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385889243381276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937110623227116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325119347712211,0.0,0.4661115242963052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3545617533630655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735607963016631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16101997067870913,0.0,0.21067629698744011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21938001871248652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253803061316751,0.0,0.0899800813335343,0.0,0.0,0.07955523022149888,0.0,0.07600208199698359,0.10866013867323462,0.0,0.07388672455671047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341173282976671,0.0,0.0,0.13086750464844732,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emphysgay,2020/01/06,i dont want to be like this anymore im in the same place i was years ago. my mental health has been shitty for 5-6 years and i just dont feel like im getting better???? ive been tryingb rly hard and i know ive been growing as a person but i dont i dont want to try so fucking hard if this is going to be the rest of my life im tired and im sad and i dont see an end,-3.2276982591876227,-1.873798702127658,0.7980464216634431,104.56136363636364,94.53191489361704,3.418181818181818,13.86460348162476,3.1291,-1.6784340425531918,278,5,84,0,11,104,55,94,0.193,0.75,0.057,-0.8923,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,1,0,4,0,15,4,0,0,0,12,23,8,0,3,3,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,4,4,11,3,7,17,2,8,0,1,1,1,1,2,1,1,6,47,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037553136519915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607940788382864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035187696606964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6858924520438017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366911079889067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059182600061543626,0.08361856972371008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820828482201957,0.06115235054959366,0.0,0.06652064231974678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097026684244982,0.0,0.0,0.12441573988838366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5057244068201838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643261005776449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267392521237464,0.11436673573383176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795608540770752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022011328995,0.12228945075776418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327149398173774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452858094736636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946739095323432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138074986313376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15074916657059714
mentalhealth,Excellent-Doughnut,2020/01/06,"Reoccurring scary thoughts I have reoccurring thought of killing myself. I would never do it. I have a good family, a wife that I love, friends and I like my job. I got a lot of mental pressure in my life the last year and those thoughts came up. I just thinking to myself how liberating it would be to just kill myself. Or that it would be perfect if I was the victim of a terror attack or a car crash or something like that. Then my family or friends wouldn't think that they did anything wrong but I would be free. 

Those thoughts are scary to me. Does anyone else have them?",1.9149710144927568,4.273327678260873,2.717934782608697,92.64530797101452,80.91304347826087,5.5724637681159415,22.6268115942029,6.816661863887847,0.53063768115942,453,15,96,5,12,142,68,115,0.187,0.66,0.153,-0.5106,1,0,1,0,0,2,11.0,0,0,2,1,3,15,4,2,7,0,15,2,0,1,2,26,24,10,2,6,8,1,0,2,2,5,1,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,6,0,1,2,2,7,0,0,8,0,18,9,8,8,1,8,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,6,6,71,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023001326612997,0.14990716485508773,0.12039687253621845,0.0,0.0,0.16644350604206729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16733439356376098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803283548145045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221938248000355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758474076332253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260703676451296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271402236304578,0.11701378815520708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451855274102735,0.0,0.3237304811492967,0.0,0.0,0.11925842253910587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333982594735576,0.14295484984584225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243836133269641,0.1320463294630744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474414249009117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283973863976204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11263303948275535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874931767571499,0.0,0.4646005587648938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4157246143518676,0.15996198000568207,0.0,0.09421587637877556
mentalhealth,pm_me_Preacher,2020/01/06,"In my whole life I have not heard an honest or fake ""I love you"" Except from when I was under 3yo. I never had suicidal thoughts, severe depression, etc. But I realised that bcs of how I was raised I never had a gf(even if some girls approached me), I was never supported on anything other than school (nothing, not gym, not other 5 sports I did, not watching movies, going out, playing video games, building a damn treehouse, swings, crossbows and complex things from all types of materials by myself, a working red dot scope with parallax...). 
Now I am waiting to move 400km away from home to college and start a almost new life",4.723945386064031,6.408698720338986,4.9233333333333364,83.11705273069681,70.27118644067797,6.9393596986817325,30.060263653484,7.3871296695380915,1.8967540489642176,491,20,88,5,9,154,91,118,0.139,0.7809999999999999,0.08,-0.733,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,1,3,7,1,0,5,0,8,3,0,1,4,22,15,7,1,1,8,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,4,4,0,1,2,5,0,3,7,3,0,0,8,3,14,4,16,7,4,15,0,1,2,1,5,5,1,4,7,66,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19793185068332775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16266055366351825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18571174762001635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17024763373031365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204475067499751,0.13055514656859185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233695369342496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19827301556644586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792317267050575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17839939366562593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100854517005655,0.0,0.0,0.4573517727431549,0.1909050334062196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18966385009342965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20004642697475405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22330395247117574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990753096782915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162122324518237,0.2243066595973428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313191169183129,0.0,0.0,0.15692306313509835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22068469353167952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14390167869081075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theendisloading_uk,2020/01/06,"Anyone know what's going on with me? Ive got some weird symptoms for mental health and I was wondering if anyone knows what they might mean:

1: I get more invested in the lives and stories of media and other people than my own actual life
2: I feel a lot like a passenger in my own life a lot
3: I'm really self conscious
4: I keep losing interest in stuff rapidly that I used to love
5: I feel bad for other people but don't feel bad for me when the same thing happens to me
6: I'm more empathetic towards others than actually caring for my own health and life

Just for some extra info if it's needed I'm 16 Male, any help or info is greatly appreciated!",4.772173913043479,4.426913572463769,6.785326086956522,77.13929347826091,69.07246376811594,9.508695652173913,27.39492753623189,9.188382445141503,2.075214492753624,515,14,106,9,8,183,91,138,0.07,0.768,0.162,0.9351,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,2,9,0,0,5,0,5,7,0,1,0,29,24,9,0,3,5,0,3,1,0,1,6,0,0,2,9,5,0,1,10,0,1,1,1,4,0,0,2,3,14,5,16,21,11,7,0,1,0,1,5,5,0,9,2,69,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.2907020848547192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10128924620866173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082947784565375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487294855318994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186166106745266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259366340528749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781879715338018,0.0,0.08465016184447105,0.0,0.11912673251776512,0.16421488288121006,0.0,0.0,0.1317135724391081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3166479501784636,0.0,0.0,0.09983621046831864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13239117074016238,0.0,0.0,0.16371504046962398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315617569471412,0.0727681089048868,0.0,0.13152316174392795,0.0,0.0,0.166633887650344,0.0,0.2532592725694951,0.13443071981428162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224723439194833,0.0,0.0,0.15010380796245898,0.15800950771124006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104425079373131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20652255539857067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541943045434637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538447911555467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17050898039264825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15481323676235867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895394289171322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128642611972127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16152695265897665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_SuicideOverAgony_,2020/01/06,"How do you hold your anger in? Sometimes I get so mad and my blood pressure gets so high I want to punch my crazy mom in the face and punch my sister hard.

I usually go in my room and punch huge holes in my wall. I don't know what else to do.

Just help me",-0.7613218390804591,0.9069074655172428,0.9972413793103456,105.13022988505749,86.41379310344826,4.55632183908046,14.839080459770114,5.46131890053228,-1.2987333333333333,195,3,54,1,6,63,40,58,0.21100000000000002,0.688,0.10099999999999999,-0.8041,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,4,3,2,1,1,0,3,2,2,1,0,8,8,6,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,12,0,6,8,0,10,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,1,30,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833232972576431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35439249887581376,0.0,0.19275151688078412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30381928092696153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273307054362654,0.35833943769416426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18639256971946416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3972181824241291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33543629897250904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37353502726889626,0.0,0.20004439319203832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pennio69,2020/01/06,"School starts soon... Hello everyone! This is my first post here. I've seen many people stuggle and I just want to wish them all the best. Now, to me. I've recently discovered that I could have several mental illnesses. Those of which are confirmed are Histrionic Personality Disorder (I MUST be in centre of the conversation) , Obsessive - Compulsive Personality Disorder (Everything must be in some order, although that makes my work mostly inefficient), Empathy Deficit Disorder (I lack empathy), but those I may have are Schizoid Personality Disorder (way of life in which person tries to organize their life without other people)  and Negativistic Personality Disorder (I can only express my negative emotions through passive - agressive methods). Almost all those disorders could actually be put under one mental disorder. Antisocial Mental Disorder or as people call it, Sociopathic Disorder.

Only my mother knows about this. She knew I was a bit different. My brothers or my friends at school do not know this. I am afraid that my Histrionic side will fuck things up. Anybody has a tip how do I stop this? I don't know if anybody in my family had something like this. I only know that my brother has Psychopathic Mental Disorder and my father is probably in early stages of Dementia.",6.7117503621438885,9.590238050458717,7.613177209077738,60.91581603090296,67.57798165137615,11.745436986962822,37.16175760502173,11.313756151347434,5.676840366972478,1037,56,144,39,19,346,135,218,0.191,0.747,0.062,-0.9843,1,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,2,3,6,6,1,2,4,0,25,4,0,2,4,31,36,10,0,8,7,4,0,1,1,4,3,0,0,5,17,3,0,1,5,0,0,1,4,3,0,2,4,1,25,3,19,23,7,21,0,0,1,1,17,9,1,7,8,113,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.06638822864410121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812300009038078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139410743604092,0.0,0.07427199297405679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06946703364205248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863408573896707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107768647381027,0.7796916887332184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652547187024357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650063265879311,0.06114167926320739,0.0,0.06413336569040817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057866947518200526,0.0,0.0,0.05256041260038935,0.06289336075017048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14955175219479327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610430498120982,0.03323640320220468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0454110745483995,0.06897253402484706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742361047281004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046099417818720886,0.1552214234790072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14149193289910245,0.2970092692577439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515468270043942,0.0,0.07334868820232117,0.0,0.0,0.06838972507741564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717218888853321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377015646126065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685541827583002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0523734188546325,0.0,0.0,0.0481525369053157,0.0,0.0,0.05687677908666675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045196627944471005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04618843460384976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040126317218064235,0.05399966734186848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823204066522978,0.06557924514681457,0.0,0.04952721877058554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alytunic,2020/01/06,"i hate myself and have no friends. its funny, im just so stupid and bad at everything i do. and anyone i talk to hates me. idk i just think i should hurt myself or worse. whatever ik no one will ever care and most likely clown me.",-0.9163265306122454,1.2119034897959189,1.3481632653061233,97.86469387755103,95.73469387755102,4.4326530612244905,13.122448979591837,6.1826913282559595,-0.8568448979591841,177,3,41,2,7,59,37,49,0.402,0.461,0.13699999999999998,-0.9504,0,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,3,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,11,8,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,9,3,2,6,1,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,2,29,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19063508187339231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276416441643748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27797298046109103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24661700727669075,0.0,0.0,0.2450297799493838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106397221783898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5383478759761974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918650053698837,0.0,0.2944962159460444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331973321813208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18474681003263185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21913638802412405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746956537199254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778417830326612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_tarmander_,2020/01/06,"Fitting therapy into a busy schedule I know I should prioritize my mental health, but sometimes that just isnt realistic for people with packed schedules. I'm in college 5 days a week while working 5 days a week as well and I've hit a rough patch with my mental health. I'd like to go back to therapy at least once every couple weeks but it feels like I dont have enough time. 

How do you fit therapy into a busy schedule or how do you practice self care?",3.5464055299539154,4.859358387096774,4.817235023041476,84.18870967741938,72.65591397849462,7.464823348694317,27.264208909370197,7.957251820313856,1.6329305683563748,362,13,73,5,7,120,64,93,0.0,0.8140000000000001,0.18600000000000005,0.9493,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,1,5,4,0,0,5,0,6,2,0,2,0,14,12,8,0,1,4,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,2,7,4,10,10,2,18,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,13,42,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11933631264541307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582328884572482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17172166433674946,0.0,0.20017744425898185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188881271302126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16035918069098845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13075950798369138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847187140190537,0.11087220979387112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820158770076117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32993264678272066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529178317724831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15164206658423826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3128025722276577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16527890807489218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075935171609013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190350335334702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15349302885196645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5324412054000268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904961632971872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734671365367698,0.0,0.13954003911027685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298469573932532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lev_D_Bronstein,2020/01/06,"Not sure what to do, any advice appreciated. I feel like I am on the verge of mental collapse. I am a graduate student, and as a result quite poor. I have a skull base tumor (benign) that has required multiple brain surgeries and will likely require more. I lost the sight in my left eye as a result. My father now has kidney cancer. My grandfather, who I am very close too, seems like he does not have much time left. I am dating a woman who I used to really love and who used to really love me, but after 2+ years we can't stand each other any more. I can't break up with her because I will be even more destitute, and I don't even want to break up with her. However, staying with her makes me want to put a revolver in my mouth every day. I'm not sure if I can even afford a mental health professional, even though my insurance is actually quite good. 

So now that my rant is over, how can I go about changing this? I feel like I've tried everything and feel stuck. Should I go into debt for the help of a mental health professional? Are low-income options even remotely worth it?

Thank you for listening.",3.7161160714285733,4.7389948080357165,5.094107142857143,83.47589285714288,71.90178571428571,8.278571428571428,24.267857142857146,8.660442795831766,1.480219642857143,863,23,179,15,16,289,133,224,0.115,0.76,0.125,0.7461,4,0,0,1,0,0,29.0,1,1,0,5,12,12,0,0,11,0,21,10,5,6,2,35,39,12,0,4,5,1,3,4,0,3,3,1,0,1,9,12,0,2,4,0,3,3,6,1,0,0,2,6,28,11,23,33,5,25,0,1,2,2,15,11,0,3,11,118,37,6,0.0,0.0,0.11245508205418103,0.0,0.0,0.1126086564253212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673077128832694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024765122480314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864305295544876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190589235445835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431859153057244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084502786597943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3805660889923817,0.0,0.09709248210808397,0.0,0.10356794719338144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17480248023786446,0.1646512473423773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098414345225035,0.0966556661672989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24498394111898505,0.0,0.0,0.07724120207671778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504115509041811,0.0,0.0,0.2251966968015719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579523810798948,0.0,0.2080125106068327,0.0,0.07692186128184254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3483965940491809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471275053132868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584541871832285,0.0,0.24513832571431446,0.0,0.0,0.14764806226511035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049078036037119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228277386878055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172197769459043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609511797488334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322016327612335,0.0,0.0671958563569868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782386322005236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19905623301215028,0.0,0.09508292604570813,0.13594001188011673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420910927347102
mentalhealth,catyear,2020/01/06,"auditory hallucinations kinda just a vent, but ive noticed something about myself, and never quite knew what to call it and didn’t think anything toooo much about it. back a couple years ago i was really obsessed with a video game and i would hear the audio from the video game all day in my head and would get even confused sometimes, thinking that i heard the video game in real life like actually. well its happening again. today in math class i genuinely got so confused because i heard music from my pokemon game (obviously not real and happened multiple times during class) and its just freaking me out lol this worries me. i dont know if this is really the place for this but just wanted to share, does anyone else get this?",7.1954347826086975,7.452054304347832,7.041847826086958,75.30016304347829,63.92753623188406,9.508695652173913,31.74275362318841,9.188382445141503,2.686518840579711,586,20,104,9,8,186,95,138,0.113,0.802,0.085,-0.6205,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,0,3,7,1,7,2,1,0,3,30,20,10,0,4,7,0,0,1,0,2,1,4,0,0,10,8,0,0,4,7,0,0,4,4,1,0,6,4,12,3,12,12,2,13,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,4,9,68,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.15498284332463644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407820159093875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110487977098708,0.16272716361344938,0.13069316329668346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212075422872178,0.0,0.09681359459105557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621702914968507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17572839902072582,0.0,0.10242406494124398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898215063585556,0.0,0.1861327746926547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267153353733302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489737496533716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659510416371642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270207589381652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28088335136997983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16299244031212956,0.0,0.17899871835283931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728187305457624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217740513588276,0.07759014474954545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674904062468552,0.0,0.12248974643394593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808146282460703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659303489734992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16892182208688694,0.0,0.3615378729476784,0.20348494779626533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226537045049304,0.15707443976377616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20352751571320654,0.0,0.0,0.09260768555414936,0.0,0.15054029662130872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367459957307477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14279588872404578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16128674829462944,0.0,0.22563860574366176,0.0,0.0,0.10227317917255102
mentalhealth,nnnikkiiid,2020/01/06,2020 not doing so well I struggle with severe anxiety and it has been really high for a whole week without dying down a bit. I have to keep going to the bathroom or bring a bowl with me because it seems like every second I have to throw up and I do :(. I keep zoning out. I have fainted from having too much anxiety the other day. I have fainted quite a bit. I really can't get my breath together at all. All I really have is online friends and little to no people contact in the real world. I feel bad ranting to my friends if they really even do like me so I just sit alone and I am going insane. Any tips to decrease anxiety?,0.8934725274725288,3.0849296000000024,3.462197802197803,86.77923076923078,83.76923076923076,6.175824175824177,20.824175824175825,7.447530270364453,0.899802197802198,488,15,98,8,14,170,84,130,0.154,0.743,0.10400000000000001,-0.5751,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,1,6,7,0,1,7,0,14,3,1,0,2,19,22,8,1,1,5,0,1,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,3,7,0,2,2,0,0,4,4,2,1,1,1,1,17,5,16,21,6,15,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,3,4,76,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875436289561076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423730406774144,0.0,0.35178190263216585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798442077745645,0.09343954247878852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3346894127129877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09885448223830083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15908295512853873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012415948957294,0.0,0.12914705257940454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750419880143733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368512398922877,0.0,0.08008373963364651,0.0,0.17422786702130866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619512959207571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724889213193981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14977209878188566,0.1536292568037114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268021796823115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626673220363488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630347250007003,0.0,0.174468955417272,0.39278658134153865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13954256121412276,0.0,0.17316550813126502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16024406993152884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229539140537031,0.0,0.1378193069536078,0.0,0.0,0.17113435149401846,0.0,0.14775878608788034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Desperatiff,2020/01/06,"I am alone on this journey I'm 28, have been diagnosed with schizophrenia and bipolar along the way, wasn't able to attain a degree and so on.

I talk to my mom regarding me having a work, and she simply said don't work because you can't keep up with everything. She simply stated I don't have the capacity due to my punctuality in which I'm having a hard time getting down to work due to mood swings, disabilities and what not which she doesn't understand. What she wants is for me to stay all day at home doing chores and not doing anything for myself that cultivates success or proper living or at least a person who has a contribution to a society. Yet she implies to me what would happen to me when she dies, like I can't take care of myself or anything.

I'm so annoyed and I want to break down, like the only one close to me aside from my aunt and my brother, simply doesn't want me to achieve anything due to me being not capable.

I got no one to held onto aside from my little faith, and also the fact that I want to achieve something, not to feel good for myself or just for bragging but simply I want to be a man who can live up for his own, to provide for his own and to not live in this mentally ill stigma that these people shove in my face directly.

I hated my mom due to these, and I can't even look or talk at her now, I will continue on my dream like having a work, completing college, getting my singing dreams successful and having a family without them bringing with me.",9.441436403508773,5.7576748322368445,9.428157894736845,72.58877192982456,62.19078947368421,12.370175438596489,37.83333333333333,9.928628108626363,3.4824767543859654,1175,38,240,17,12,390,153,304,0.065,0.838,0.09699999999999999,0.7748,0,1,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,1,9,8,11,2,0,13,0,25,4,1,0,2,41,47,21,1,6,13,4,2,3,0,2,3,1,2,2,14,16,0,2,2,3,0,2,15,2,0,2,5,4,42,8,48,38,4,32,1,0,1,0,22,16,0,5,13,179,56,9,0.1190955564233528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233470791140429,0.0,0.09524067344371584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940164860120935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259954579068614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121425857076364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248694250221033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680678136350334,0.0,0.0,0.12087948282793493,0.12360238480399033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866149180068098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703540678750048,0.0,0.1122726913628486,0.0,0.06021829174872845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444502548676628,0.0,0.0,0.09989170227750564,0.09525159605788464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531580722605573,0.0,0.10668622580405036,0.11758220553885793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946255355074888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585760265935117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745522193585925,0.1193650350614895,0.31549067476068504,0.0,0.10001027241326814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200203093009225,0.0,0.0,0.2789665525787532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16140446249937995,0.0905775373112689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825658632949291,0.10398964613911454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328714676660985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09168557781714523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269400169792902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954503680548892,0.19144899398718696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944557669155155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398267436709305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3512282241898049,0.09453250924700547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480386645727028,0.0,0.34681193398972804,0.0,0.0,0.08460206626470508,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ieatplatesyay,2020/01/06,"i need ways to motivate myself into doing my goddamn work lol im a high-school student and ive got 3 big projects due wednesday. mostly because the end of the semester is hectic. two projects are with the same teacher who i never feel motivated enough to do the work in her classes because she always marks people wrong unless you do exactly as she says exactly the way she wants it, even if you've done it right

im stressed and my already low motivation levels have dropped through the floor. i suspect that i have some sort of mental health issues, but when i went to the doctor today, he rushed me through the appointment and gave me a referral for blood tests because he was running late. so im thinking i just wanna make a system for this whole thing, and i was wondering if anyone else has any ideas. i can't go a day without napping at least for a few hours or else i feel even worse than i always do, but i obviously don't have time for naps right now, so i want help i guess with ideas as to how to motivate myself

this is partially just me venting and partially me wanting advice lol",4.6024657534246565,5.557830799086761,5.406283105022833,82.30641095890414,69.77625570776256,8.214429223744293,30.581735159817352,8.447377352677275,2.249225022831049,871,35,170,13,15,284,138,219,0.07,0.8420000000000001,0.08800000000000001,0.6946,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,6,9,3,0,1,13,2,17,3,1,6,4,44,31,17,0,7,9,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,7,8,0,0,11,2,0,4,4,3,0,1,6,3,27,0,24,25,7,28,0,1,0,0,11,9,0,8,11,115,34,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659262479397152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316663779869216,0.0,0.19855823348820648,0.0,0.0,0.08113786537630978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342738407875308,0.12225167546878007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21819880376628564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694790021126696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212331695795665,0.0,0.12210002905400408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993436977796728,0.0,0.1056771204502752,0.12328364246479835,0.0,0.15761203670029975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12065786437383305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780910800412476,0.0,0.09542660398354837,0.0,0.13143823392167422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682559953273484,0.0,0.0,0.0799739094510771,0.1260621863109359,0.0,0.0,0.11750062374887946,0.0,0.0,0.26938280914667084,0.38663999316433145,0.12453320698237134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345918101636807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964327073589991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024082534724165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847009604928259,0.09202260026400576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827175634350202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20378764592215184,0.0,0.09488357865609504,0.0,0.1207525157713468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366742116086949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926716800974952,0.07645183277158009,0.0,0.0,0.06957317063040717,0.0,0.11309607491985467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11655280575542723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111241262807022,0.1894123919562058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060561950150367,0.0,0.13321023693935805,0.0,0.1150147982144101,0.12939134834205984,0.1737245697252901,0.0,0.12159153980685378,0.0,0.1304515370289483,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Misrta,2020/01/06,"Anyone else suffering from numbness, fatigue and influenza-like symptoms? Feels like there are bunch of random small spots popping up everywhere in my body. Randomly get tight in different parts of my body, feel like my body is twisted or hard. It’s all really weird.",6.09095744680851,8.703423574468086,5.562712765957446,76.10875000000001,68.57446808510639,9.806382978723407,33.026595744680854,10.125756701596842,3.953855319148937,216,10,34,6,4,66,39,47,0.198,0.7090000000000001,0.09300000000000001,-0.5563,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,6,3,0,1,8,5,2,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,3,2,6,5,3,4,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,3,2,18,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14843454984941346,0.21751098415617695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7074020597956587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217925557428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17733680836325644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21467526498511752,0.30331277426890696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091010740526096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901655886413467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20742337505966335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22988387811674565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13599515370793286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22064531122508454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AspieEdwin,2020/01/06,"super suicidal but hesitating to search for help I have an important exam tomorrow, and I prepared really well for it.  
but I'm so dysphoric and suicidal, and it's so tempting to end it all.  
It would not be my first attempt, and I hope it would be my last..  
I know I should go to an ER or something, but I wanna try to make it through the night so I can take my exam. Does that make sense?",1.6014111498257826,3.113397085365857,4.088327526132404,86.61573170731708,78.14634146341464,8.10034843205575,25.12891986062717,8.841846274778883,1.80350662020906,299,11,67,7,7,105,51,82,0.129,0.684,0.187,0.5251,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,2,1,18,14,11,2,5,5,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,10,3,8,9,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,50,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103710326746264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21291836211584336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044796194276157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136621854865624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113150831296855,0.0,0.0,0.2387661910519039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211464698352282,0.19595377553232032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209306742345538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22559415265499774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540030083208363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18506759410715487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5259055951048911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18074690611514604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321222968918428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161437165501639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415390126313885,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MmS9991,2020/01/06,"Medical discharge from USMC So I made it half way through USMC boot before getting medical discharge for Suicidal ideations. 
 I don’t feel at home. I feel ashamed and embarrassed. I have no motivation to do anything. Is there someone out there that’s experienced what I’m going through?? I don’t know what to do now that the only thing I’ve ever wanted is no longer reachable.",3.7418511066398352,6.375025478873241,4.320643863179075,82.15126760563383,75.90140845070422,7.437424547283702,32.67806841046277,8.418075326091056,2.891871629778672,303,16,54,6,7,96,50,71,0.20600000000000002,0.7609999999999999,0.033,-0.9092,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,2,1,0,7,2,0,2,1,9,15,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,6,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,1,3,5,0,8,14,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,36,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21983009400916848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22731298550657544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416397261004772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701438871488997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395674883207261,0.0,0.15181949486175794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26795910053039945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14681091095275914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527704588817519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5382226541591464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20316889857770967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263433912334809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29220332966613205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17747322978544766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756368207014546,0.2120400526843624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MinimumX,2020/01/06,"I want to die I'm fucking jealous of all of my friends, I am the poorest of the group (difference between me and the others is fucking sad), never had a girlfriend or someone interested in me and my friends make fun of me and don't even try to help. I tried talking about my feelings to my mum but she said how terrible of a mother she is and that made me feel fucking terrible. My friends don't care about me. I have no happiness in my life. Only thing keeping me alive is my sister, I want her to grow up with a brother but sometimes I wish she was never born so I could just kill myself without feeling bad for anything. I'm perpetually sad and in emotional pain. I have nowhere else to turn to, sorry.",3.2031628787878823,4.519317687500003,4.675176767676766,84.8602272727273,73.5138888888889,7.180808080808082,31.84090909090909,7.686295010490155,2.120258333333333,553,27,113,7,11,185,87,144,0.22399999999999998,0.584,0.192,-0.8662,0,0,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,0,0,6,18,5,0,6,0,11,5,0,3,3,25,28,10,2,4,5,4,3,0,4,0,2,1,0,0,3,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,6,11,0,0,4,4,26,7,21,23,1,8,0,2,0,3,16,4,3,1,3,83,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12388669362988712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569978705501714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534918822927557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201988890893644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15624318539919074,0.15728873484005576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576203080673284,0.16934420984487114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943434397872512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283620434275486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3489348575083153,0.4175326026915024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602592272221575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090794317699077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13381237800910872,0.16655706287027516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633523186455386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245045265214473,0.10049075621048864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23222101763374955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449716749049185,0.16019176902412527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320390908047698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755730506907953,0.0,0.1488940393303259,0.1685241433211009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100333140604147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001620453757946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20442197273145796,0.1637510330521868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17759209625782105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17312069807904856,0.14512116266908906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fseed,2020/01/06,"What might cause short but massive anxiety bursts? I've been off of an anti-depressant since May, I was forced into cold turkey (long story) - Ever since then, especially at night, I'll get these massive anxiety bursts. Absolutely massive. The bursts are so strong that they cause me to grimace, and it feels like my head is going to explode. They're often unprovoked and only last about 10 seconds.

I get intrusive thoughts with these bursts, usually a few seconds before the burst happens. It is becoming pretty debilitating. Any thoughts? I could really use some guidance.",5.283100000000001,8.346581110000002,5.419999999999997,74.015,72.9,8.4,31.0,9.120678840339163,3.360199999999999,461,21,70,11,10,145,78,100,0.09699999999999999,0.777,0.126,0.7329,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,4,0,8,1,1,3,1,17,16,5,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,2,6,2,8,9,2,11,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,4,7,43,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825074394121952,0.0,0.2885485902968281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20828783535242487,0.16048004983080813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3874770551287522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057738185383548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243618772749122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705945447827734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535905829253556,0.1347319660901992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19706571035136008,0.0,0.1071826145189504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16677351530163506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935523918086589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372970896253169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921377584647218,0.0,0.0,0.1669002195882809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20006898730399925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17698318563696974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14343463438817974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918684325206522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081848172714395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31201467933872723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994459727124788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628851166882912,0.20771022446401846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kr9969,2020/01/06,"Everything seems to be going good, but I can’t help feeling lost. So I just moved away from my hometown to live with my buddy from high school and his roommates from college. In the past 4 months here I made some amazing friends, got a promotion at work, started talking to an old friend who lives here too and we kind of have a romantic thing going. With all that I feel like I should be happy, but instead I feel more lost and lonely than ever. My buddy has a girlfriend who he spends most of his time with, and our other roommates are awesome and I get along with all of them, but when he or the friend I’m talking to aren’t around I feel really lonely. Even when I go out of my way to spend time and talk with my other roommates and friends it doesn’t help me. I guess I’m just wondering if this is normal for other young adults and what steps they took to help them through this.",6.736936771025171,5.3378190718232075,6.335101289134438,85.46310620012278,65.46408839779005,9.149416820135052,31.1608348680172,7.3871296695380915,1.7272462860650704,696,20,151,5,9,216,110,181,0.062,0.682,0.256,0.9922,1,4,0,0,0,0,13.0,2,0,3,4,12,13,0,0,6,0,10,0,0,1,3,39,29,16,0,3,7,0,4,1,5,1,0,0,0,1,11,17,0,0,6,0,2,6,3,4,0,0,5,4,23,9,27,21,5,23,0,4,0,0,23,6,0,7,11,106,34,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617963109850453,0.0,0.0,0.1226163950913004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619918577047359,0.11805179697036546,0.0,0.0,0.1172920154765497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639547050738381,0.09323481431690236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4033200790341069,0.0,0.06818495063204623,0.0,0.2225118088750594,0.10946376943073692,0.10437902759754968,0.0,0.1437690798286069,0.0,0.0,0.1389280036051826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624299268718726,0.13788867962046644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135903813824763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637595297635817,0.0,0.23048159618310995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.284929409433761,0.0,0.0,0.123489656992935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417009863041388,0.13870916126080546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127869956404655,0.0,0.0,0.1369460057091052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245844836386693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08360665279937407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208088363224066,0.0,0.11880941987699994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237410833320216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3146917320120468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670359807308732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15220032138065553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14499899256386592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359103469051033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153016617680778,0.09501124896394028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heydariusbang,2020/01/06,High School Psychologist limitations I’ve been going through some shit lately and I want to get help for it and I was wondering what I can or cannot say without the school psychologist having to report it. I’m 17 years old and getting a paid psychologist isn’t an option for me atm.,2.4972023809523805,5.073520982142857,4.275000000000002,81.03666666666669,80.25,7.3047619047619055,23.619047619047624,8.344100000000001,1.6967833333333338,229,8,44,5,6,77,43,56,0.068,0.856,0.076,-0.1531,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,3,0,6,1,1,0,0,10,13,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,2,1,3,1,0,0,3,1,4,0,6,10,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,4,3,27,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27921651642978457,0.0,0.15186384376286918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179107875733234,0.2823262055764713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014289707101829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803960866629892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124992554660152,0.0,0.540869559527541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742912761491653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15760970894015455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575847089064883,0.2897821264318987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720770206142761
mentalhealth,spidermojo22,2020/01/06,"The only real joy i get in life is from streaming... Hello, I am someone who posted here a lot in the past. Right now im going through a particularly rough patch. I like to talk to people, I like to help people, but i find it harder and harder to wake up, harder to go to work, and harder to go to sleep. I dont want to live life at a 9-5 i dont enjoy when I get pleasure from streaming to people and talking to a community. I think that this is the best joy I get because I can help others with their issues while also venting my own. In addition to this, I think i might be a video game addict.... but I really am obsessed with league of legends and enjoy it way too much. I dont know what I want to get out of this post. I just want to help people, I want people who relate to talk to me, and I want to try and do better at the basics in taking care of myself, but its so damn hard in cold boston winters... Ill be live tonight. Come by if you want. I just wanted to vent and junk.  


[twitch.tv/spidermojo](https://twitch.tv/spidermojo) is the stream, propositivity is my website devoted to mental health. ill be on at 6:00 PM EST",3.9861350574712655,4.361010745689658,5.446310344827584,83.56305747126437,70.85344827586206,7.3935632183908035,23.656321839080466,7.0316486544052195,0.7354232183908054,871,19,186,7,15,295,124,232,0.125,0.7040000000000001,0.171,0.9542,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,1,3,8,13,1,1,10,0,15,8,2,0,0,32,35,15,0,8,6,0,2,2,0,1,6,0,0,0,11,12,0,0,4,2,0,4,3,2,0,0,0,3,26,11,39,31,4,25,0,0,0,0,12,12,1,3,8,125,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343250191784905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321068664496759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342939247406552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919660046784806,0.09202591414379872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608838197421024,0.0,0.0,0.0896319506690546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3658460013225653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510203134203472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21745238973816952,0.0,0.1774061729763272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321053478229938,0.0,0.0,0.1106028620184874,0.0,0.0,0.2092324413529799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239447443927597,0.10860369798635036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718449155034022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14699060988576362,0.1016695178859346,0.0,0.18376039513156772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846165074847058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048603709650702,0.1103831796109573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649050476882058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913655796160443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932981339870596,0.3606842502151006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993069207237597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11843443957588465,0.06665864784203818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886020238044479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412757037384757,0.0,0.08816328200314248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823447408356463,0.2509001932337749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13334518491928007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064476636521136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4296097130148605,0.08259197168910923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575140462706006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tylerh05,2020/01/06,"I cant care I dont want to get into my past so i wont but it wasnt fun.

So much happened and i cant function like i used to anymore. I cant care about people or how they feel. Not even my best friends. Its hard to feel sympathy. I dont see anyone as important even if i should. I dont care about my life either. Im failing school because of it and i just cant seem to feel anything towards it. I dont feel anything towards anything or anyone. I dont love people, im scared of attention. I cant talk to adults anymore because adults scare me and i panic badly. Im just useless.

Nothing makes me happy, but at the same time i dont really care. After everything, i just dont see the point in trying. I dont try in anything. I cant. I dont work like that i guess. Im too tired. Im fine with getting lectured on and shouted at for doing things wrong or not doing them at all. I just zone out and stop listening. Its just like, everything is pointless to me and i cant stop feeling that way. In my head, im broken. 

Everything ive been through has stopped me from being able to feel like a normal human being. Idek what this is tbh. Just confused. Its weird i guess lmao. I wish i knew how to fix my head.",-1.102207792207789,0.9452070909090936,1.61004761904762,96.954,93.62121212121212,4.229264069264069,19.285281385281387,5.860315114193679,-0.1923191341991344,928,31,217,8,35,319,126,264,0.317,0.609,0.07400000000000001,-0.997,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,2,3,15,23,0,4,3,0,28,5,2,4,1,49,53,17,0,5,15,0,7,4,1,2,2,2,0,3,11,9,0,3,9,0,0,0,20,9,0,0,3,11,37,14,29,46,5,19,0,2,2,1,9,12,0,8,10,139,48,4,0.0619367275965818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228491817612685,0.08661520007235304,0.0,0.20387459784311995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05171458044430576,0.07551210853390976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499877442018337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25259448660489353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6533044511626496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181724887670452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16699421118167287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879024227796198,0.044247610570541385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04785216210042336,0.0,0.06471876765010989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364605765120942,0.0,0.054770443664473215,0.06593279823533116,0.05548314231342049,0.0,0.12712990252087428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4014137652007549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0437477423881116,0.12103662623494298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05590031482721016,0.0,0.041343246617290164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04553062131470317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06068484263221793,0.059429960571700975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266940482112727,0.0,0.0,0.05912561477774575,0.0858782567083567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05855022729833949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03967825367892122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240189385473364,0.06268327497181363,0.09871110583864247,0.05638487062312296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15534563284145442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049782395520589336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04114800968619736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03611580394353617,0.0711871571115712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841019448090044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05349344643375599,0.0,0.0,0.03653188666174198,0.049162491448799736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122418006535504,0.0,0.0,0.045090675353176984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771808863647404,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pawyer25,2020/01/06,"Share your best mental health coping mechanisms I want to know what kinds of things you all do to cope with anxiety, depression, and mental illnesses alike, and also what are some of your favorite mental health-focused ways to decompress. I'm asking for me, as I have long struggled with intense anxiety and have been having a harder time combating the attacks and feelings of overwhelm. I'm also asking because as we start the new year I think a lot of people could benefit from learning from other coping techniques and experiences.",12.011842105263154,9.876944052631579,10.689342105263162,60.72664473684214,55.84210526315789,13.289473684210527,43.75,11.698219412168324,5.354631578947369,435,19,63,9,4,137,66,95,0.163,0.696,0.141,-0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,3,0,1,2,8,1,2,4,0,7,2,0,0,1,17,16,9,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,8,4,14,14,4,6,0,2,0,0,7,0,0,2,5,48,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26694539412318397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553614956885439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120645507960769,0.18987686664043565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10174284611559306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751549634073622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13325889205525301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375377058459066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16326368402443334,0.0,0.0,0.08439144245336003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35482130701132564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17380434844495452,0.09172581822194746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14770437679479567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14189541737945802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5045985230468023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16119647465522952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157098964205196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118135181494888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17448381397715998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088329272611154,0.10694504629730406,0.0,0.0,0.09732279376937364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844402957623133,0.13248025778245098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748040473302174
mentalhealth,NoPaperMadBillz,2020/01/06,"Why are almost all psychiatrist ratings so low? Hi, I'm in the US, and looking for a new psychiatrist. But all of the reviews even miles and miles away from me are so low. My school psychologist once told me to disregard most of them because if you think about it, the people who are rating them aren't usually healthy. What do you think?",4.224090909090911,5.74440534848485,4.9337575757575785,83.20063636363638,71.27272727272728,8.31030303030303,28.35151515151515,8.841846274778883,2.0876460606060605,267,10,54,5,5,86,50,66,0.147,0.853,0.0,-0.8481,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,2,2,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,0,2,11,10,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,8,0,8,9,3,8,0,2,1,0,8,6,0,3,2,38,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777286040083092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26058193381402583,0.0,0.0,0.16907159416968426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18318880199127735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329063633401532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26786890661117313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953715082513541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922813976208204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806956773694655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3554327435561043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650223318265697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336210746533261,0.0,0.30546474728392303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502676168535954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,godtieruser,2020/01/06,"I’m afraid for my friend She’s been struggling with her mental health for as long as I’ve known her (which hasn’t been that long) I don’t know exactly with what issues specifically because some of the things that she talks about don’t seem like anything she’s been diagnosed with previously, I just really wanna help her, but it’s hard to do that when you also have a multitude of issues that you also have to deal with, and I don’t know how to help her, from what I’ve heard from her even her therapist doesn’t know how to help her. I’m just really worried for her safety and any advice on how to help would be nice.",9.470232558139537,5.523460674418608,9.016186046511633,76.37358139534886,62.41085271317829,12.800620155038759,33.55193798449612,10.355215969177356,2.881163100775193,493,10,109,8,5,159,70,129,0.05,0.762,0.188,0.9607,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,0,10,5,0,2,2,0,13,2,0,3,1,21,20,11,0,2,3,0,1,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,9,6,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,2,17,3,21,14,1,4,0,0,0,0,21,1,0,2,4,75,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622603881942689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655773857029692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11291847624563542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366435278914924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122144708325566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171188412462941,0.0,0.16853543698187767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967327609388516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828843447517455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487465801903454,0.0,0.0,0.1765014815432518,0.0,0.0,0.4451944577412428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34662237930990675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737672596097612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112276756299533,0.0,0.0,0.29389487969922845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16733753984970334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212749469355016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511640532593972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17358964111646694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346326070612066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19279476896712835,0.1103150518744246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16863001654566714,0.0,0.11795588361167897,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Itsnouse19,2020/01/06,"Family and not allowed to have feelings My anxiety and anger got the best of me just before New Year’s . I have a new sister in law, my brother and she have been married for a year and they were spending a lot of time together the year before this one. So I have known her for about 2 years. 
In that time, I have noticed she seems to be examining me or observing my responses about various things. I feel she notices my habits, my way if speaking, stupid things I do, etc.It feels invasive and rude.  I tried to put it out of my mind and challenge my own thoughts, like my mental health care had taught me to do in the past. However, the more you notice things the more likely that it is real. 
I meant to have a private talk with my brother and tell him what I felt. He was always too busy so I tried to have good manners and forget it. But I couldn’t.
I defriended her on Facebook because I was tired of tolerating what I thought was happening. I thought she had publicly disliked a Christmas gift i gave her. 
In addition to all this, I am a recent transplant to a small town from a large city. I miss it there very much because there are many things I can’t get to anymore. Ion my new location. You have to drive 50 miles to do any real shopping. I am not a great driver and I dislike it. I don’t trust myself behind the wheel for an extended period of time. Plus I have appointments with a social worker to discuss mental health and that is difficult to get to as well. My brother said he doesn’t care. 
When I finally made my feelings known, they got angry. They said I had no right to miss the city I came from and I should just be quiet. They said my hometown was stupid And that only 20 year old live there.
I hang out with people who are my brother!s friends almost exclusively and they treat me similarly. They don’t ask me anything about myself, they hate if I talk about my hometown. etc. 
this is unfair to me and they don’t want me to have any feelings except those that are favorable to them and their lifestyle. I don’t think others should treat someone else like that. 
The point is my mental health issues blew up and I did something bad. But I need my feelings to be heard. Sorry just venting.",3.126863556558817,4.7700312167042895,3.9924623777276165,88.3561477928267,74.30474040632055,6.908678204163532,25.623839979934782,7.594959193182576,1.2356265864058191,1731,59,357,22,36,555,215,443,0.115,0.794,0.091,-0.8653,2,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,0,2,10,3,15,24,5,0,19,0,44,4,0,2,1,66,78,26,0,7,11,4,7,3,1,2,4,6,0,0,23,24,0,0,16,1,2,4,10,9,1,1,25,13,77,15,48,47,9,35,0,2,0,0,41,13,0,6,20,256,100,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103045744394463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733255913727834,0.0,0.0,0.11005779055840363,0.0,0.061904163946538075,0.0,0.08025165509587469,0.0,0.0,0.06659089492639401,0.0,0.07564999203303838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06756545894313393,0.09865709486615644,0.0,0.1377152223083885,0.0,0.08492135074305694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255179793830763,0.16500822657108222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759891586258894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18049608744280984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628489573886749,0.0,0.2454958219240413,0.0,0.07769662473588444,0.0886447429844902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251918251987565,0.0,0.08455551995095424,0.0,0.0,0.06787249865410341,0.12943945648818533,0.08921542939257986,0.0,0.0,0.07155796548895066,0.0,0.0,0.07989250263262132,0.0,0.25804496838956403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446025507366821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860139534487335,0.0,0.07145451827616832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879594088400763,0.0,0.07656918468673864,0.0,0.08204095497389234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446472958943558,0.0,0.08170690501198655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948607334070876,0.060001722109124536,0.0,0.2344613380593299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763864828190583,0.08491273081964712,0.0,0.05483400479712499,0.0615438884220065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724802683172888,0.056100269768071635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649627908897991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134771956808026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18421109338916566,0.0,0.0,0.07989949335653923,0.0,0.0,0.06910589140245868,0.2309225353398176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736672255361981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248852960697997,0.06856390182084802,0.06229675854063616,0.0,0.0905841716462493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13008209181005131,0.07072831557864233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21504064309589246,0.0518507589517962,0.0,0.19272614607669733,0.1415566469405991,0.09300651575971336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987977568821568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06676810606111087,0.04772916394472907,0.06423113692478577,0.0,0.0,0.07275748617667199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605515987323431
mentalhealth,cannotdefend,2020/01/06,"I'm too sensitive. Has anyone ""toughened up,"" so to speak? Someone said something bitchy on social media and I've been ruminating about it for hours and my stomach hasn't stopped hurting. :|",3.5344285714285704,6.521141228571429,4.005357142857147,81.93089285714288,79.57142857142857,5.785714285714287,31.607142857142854,7.1686216300943375,2.3225714285714285,153,8,25,2,4,48,32,35,0.09,0.737,0.17300000000000001,0.0052,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,3,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,5,3,0,4,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,14,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27303690378993434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38455007137099695,0.0,0.4180233596445305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3714416245396478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3980513213837947,0.3308575367878536,0.3006152149053356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32646379675382364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_LikeBananas,2020/01/06,"Do I need healthcare? First of all, I'm sorry for any grammar mistakes or repeating words because I'm still learning English. 

So for now I think 6 years I have thoughts like ""life is boring"", ""why do I need to live?"". It intensifies at times and I began to wonder if this is normal, I mean I never had any problems with accepting myself but I also have thoughts like ""if death wasn't terrifying I'd have killed myself a long time ago"". My life is getting better every year I've overcome a lot of obstacles and it's just getting better now but I can't enjoy it. I have ""goals"" in my life but I don't see the point in fulfilling them. I just don't want to do anything since I will die one day. Life for me is tiresome. 
So I began to wonder do I need healthcare?

I wasn't able to express all my feelings as I lack words in English and I would like to write more but I just can't. I hope that what I wrote is understandable.",1.2115378289473708,3.2288566614583374,3.1010526315789484,90.82815789473685,81.34375,5.500438596491228,23.126096491228072,6.5966054737557815,0.5860583333333342,717,25,154,7,19,240,105,192,0.17600000000000002,0.706,0.11900000000000001,-0.9224,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,4,9,12,1,0,3,0,22,4,0,0,3,42,43,14,3,12,10,0,1,3,0,2,4,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,10,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,8,2,28,8,17,33,5,20,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,7,18,103,34,2,0.13617530227111665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207111891157669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889934002743036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18520775038889603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120606708814133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830112003310135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408719773804855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782180446319114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14132846444986125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473356535604352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885432443829992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583064254662642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229195001665315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525280125896738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065779591342676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3847385727048852,0.19958512262838485,0.0,0.12024528675258687,0.12051085732307967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11577137231601126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483348253310577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30291678348912965,0.10502678805258138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13342288347138134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922759090634316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872967639372007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303013733971765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085140852342607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264561723541322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243710205631078,0.0,0.0,0.10874977229852274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725563517762099,0.0,0.21621595814879446,0.15880982769412075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176329214420424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031972145992805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287702958634696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295352612927082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673502767310822,0.0,0.0,0.17538485995987654
mentalhealth,fjakq,2020/01/06,"Too depressed to even get a therapist I can’t bring myself to do anything. Most days I stay home and think about everything’s that has gone wrong, currently going wrong, and very likely will go wrong later. 

I haven’t worked in almost a year because I quit due to my depression. I just stay home all day, cook and clean because I have a husband that deserves at least that (although even spending a couple hours doing anything productive is just so incredibly draining on me mentally) 

I have been applying for jobs but I’ve only received rejection. Even from shitty places. A month ago I managed to actually get something but that only lasted a couple weeks. Didn’t take them long for them to hate me and call me back into the boss’ office and let me know they’ve “decided to part ways.” I didn’t even get a reason but not like I needed one. Pretty obvious I’m just garbage with no prospects that nobody wants around, and I don’t want to be around them either. 

I wish I could at least say I’m just stuck, and not in this fucking decline.",4.4550903119868615,5.879925182266014,4.975684729064039,83.49374055829229,70.57635467980295,7.777865353037767,27.819047619047623,8.238735603445708,1.8554580623973729,824,29,157,12,15,263,127,203,0.163,0.769,0.068,-0.9605,2,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,3,2,14,10,2,0,8,0,16,2,0,2,2,35,35,12,0,5,10,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,3,0,6,11,1,0,4,1,1,5,8,8,0,1,5,1,22,2,20,26,6,30,0,3,0,1,7,9,1,2,15,104,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.10915280599621896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915131082042324,0.0,0.11200504614467424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18409167353412947,0.1991465219076636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600837814362555,0.0,0.13636961719767662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11421485105307895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930585683201298,0.2475273705768481,0.0,0.1442724091267018,0.0,0.1926783790092816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29551252444428444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052664442483067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340668736947156,0.17531639113191175,0.0,0.12713775613925513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043209832760194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243962068873241,0.0,0.11015309069901563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11099726326301447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061471716172846386,0.0911754687882772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437770352673088,0.0,0.10929186528505766,0.0,0.0,0.09898675971302844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272194238309753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928033525703039,0.0,0.0,0.08293789601572381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579477435195249,0.17013913730890948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112635729273605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168630204599568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379514342934265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189698838867979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500394821439792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895033159899883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611022984579005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384417331265616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840998539186658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298704454409592,0.0,0.0716711571454458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229078838090753,0.1319480940552335,0.08878404099054163,0.08972206919926752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12862591654912114,0.0,0.0,0.08143062425989821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668824776850457,0.0,0.07202993728444161
mentalhealth,manicpanicattack,2020/01/06,"Should I just figure out a way to listen to healing tones all the time? This year, I decided to work on my own emotions, conversation skills, basically improve myself inside-out, starting with emotional stability. 

I am currently reading about buddhism, and one of the biggest themes seems to be about becoming aware of your emotions, and gaining control by realizing our own constantly changing desires. 

I have been following along and trying to really pay attention to my emotions, where usually I just ignore them and sort of hap-hazardly go about my day. 

Very early on when I really focused on myself, I noticed I get this feeling in my chest. A lot. It feels like the butterflies in your stomach, like the panic when you're drowning, like the beginning of a free fall on a roller coaster (roller coasters feel different when you enjoy them, but this feeling is specifically when I didn't enjoy roller coasters) 

I assume that this feeling is anxiety. It seems to come at random, and I have tried doing various things to quiet it. Deep breathing, painting, meditating, reading, etc. 

I haven't been able to go without having this feeling, except when I listened to healing tones on youtube. 528 Hz has been the most beneficial, and I even went 2 entire hours without that feeling in my chest. 

Recognizing and addressing emotions are apparently super important for healing, but when I tune into my emotions I am in physical pain without this music. Will it go away on it's own? Am I using the music to mask my emotions again? What do I do, now that I know awareness highlights this pain in my chest constantly?  

I used to just deal and ignore it, but it has become clear to me that this practice will not lead to overall happiness.",7.149999999999999,8.193490528662421,7.4062484076433135,69.92688853503188,64.09554140127389,10.101656050955414,37.992993630573245,10.125756701596842,4.2199126114649665,1382,70,218,30,20,449,171,314,0.06,0.784,0.156,0.9790000000000001,3,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,1,3,2,6,16,13,0,1,11,0,23,10,5,4,2,53,46,17,1,2,11,0,7,3,0,3,5,3,1,0,21,13,0,3,15,5,2,8,6,5,0,1,5,10,37,9,44,37,8,46,0,0,0,0,10,18,0,7,22,170,58,5,0.08503245958695413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650495988399431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989079487934614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18782334190546626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995306734121995,0.07324793464563215,0.0,0.1837797609576016,0.09537113388356674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05483890187371825,0.08766473207137881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884082203190706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6695505038541101,0.0,0.0,0.09483366975502693,0.05616313759695708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009647655469183,0.06074720611920883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442595054884008,0.0,0.14497771907119858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905186344024738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08373984420853624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04673161599805674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462769379624195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229155635129783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681001883109468,0.0,0.0,0.05762019527347115,0.0,0.1809610644693724,0.09976727005838036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701109411562856,0.0,0.1089479419839412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15482071522425553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060186412555313734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056491787772757214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04958311099807899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546291676460135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468814869158921,0.09365124093962672,0.07016068447881729,0.0,0.06749480848492151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882594194086467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24590476995428165,0.0,0.061904643311008464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05475811607530027
mentalhealth,midnightbagels,2020/01/06,"Advice for calling a new therapist for the first time? I’ve needed to go back to therapy for a while now, but had a really bad experience with one who agreed to accept my insurance over the phone and then did the runaround with payment after 4 sessions. She already was a really poor match for me, made me cry incessantly instead of having productive discussions, and I’m not really a crier, so it was just awkward all around.

It’s been long enough that I don’t remember our initial conversation and don’t know how a call will go to a new therapist. I found one who comes highly recommended. I can’t imagine it’s as easy as calling up and doctor and saying, “I need to schedule an appointment”, or is it? What can I expect? It sounds very stupid, but this call has stood in the way of me moving forward with seeing someone for a few months.",7.893772727272728,6.497877975757575,8.330113636363638,72.07517045454549,63.18181818181818,11.886363636363635,35.776515151515156,10.9516,3.7808333333333333,666,25,127,15,8,222,112,165,0.127,0.799,0.07400000000000001,-0.8972,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,1,7,4,1,1,13,0,13,1,0,2,1,26,24,14,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,10,10,0,0,5,0,1,5,4,3,0,3,8,3,11,1,22,15,3,23,0,0,1,0,12,6,0,1,13,92,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929733653097294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460136266292337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778899445187845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017425790712212,0.11047805349462607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5404363512108329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397822941802555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14534254500152147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543068988192158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671745221194626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943010981250247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254763710506786,0.0,0.14507729722453044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15039608333661494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979876476816452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271722916243623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709519984540233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520028153706564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561310148442528,0.14063061202458954,0.0,0.1962207781499924,0.0,0.25558258764872965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17932103799960866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542944095176861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988785511362931,0.0,0.0,0.10522272761625397,0.0,0.0,0.10543845408452912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211063362330198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15131449441867426,0.3072573707232685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715432834986387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091742808905152,0.0,0.10502601613598972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thewildernessfiles,2020/01/06,"A test They're plotting to murder me. They as in my family... no... my blood relatives. They want to control me and hold me back from living my life... my very much adult life. They don't love me--obviously. Love is freedom, not control.",-0.3293478260869556,1.8060490000000016,1.7872826086956553,92.4900543478261,102.47826086956522,4.908695652173913,18.793478260869566,6.6274283507984215,0.409878260869565,178,6,37,3,8,59,33,46,0.212,0.6859999999999999,0.102,-0.7867,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,3,2,1,3,1,0,1,0,2,5,1,2,0,6,5,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,10,2,5,5,1,2,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,1,23,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20467211972877408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5970757179237761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509260700520823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760145020367831,0.0,0.0,0.2350373725341319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4804666000128229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19566922733052672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196222239863271,0.1569968919734701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wano0916,2020/01/06,"My name is Aaron and I work for The Center for Suicide Awareness! Hello everyone,

As stated in the title, My name is Aaron and I work for The Center for Suicide Awareness located in Kaukauna WI.  Pronounced Kau-Kau-NA :)  [https://centerforsuicideawareness.org/](https://centerforsuicideawareness.org/)  (very out of date website, new one coming very very soon)  [https://www.facebook.com/CenterForSuicideAwareness/](https://www.facebook.com/CenterForSuicideAwareness/) for more up to date notifications by me!  We are a non-profit organization that focuses on education, training, emotional support to prevent suicide all while focusing on breaking the stigma of mental health. 

A little about me, my title at The Center is Video Game/Online Outreach Director.  I came from 12 years in Law Enforcement and left that job to focus on helping those who struggle with suicide/mental health.  Thankfully, our executive director, Barb is very up and coming with newer ways to reach out to anyone and everyone when it comes to mental health/suicide.  We are implementing video games as a positive way to cope with struggles people are facing.  Being a gamer myself and someone who has issues with anxiety and depression, I know that gaming has always been my coping mechanism to ease the hardships with it.

We are starting up a podcast for The Center that will talk with experts and everyday people who have knowledge and insights with mental health/suicide.  That is a motto of our podcast, to share YOUR story.  Even if you think your story doesn't matter, there is always someone that will relate to it in someway and we need to get that message out there.  We are starting small, but have many people lined up to share their story.  Along with that, we will be starting to stream using our partner Twitch for The Center to raise awareness of mental health and suicide prevention.  Any and all proceeds for the stream will go directly to The Center.  

Our goal at The Center is to reach out to as many people as we can in as many ways as we can.  We currently attend PAX and have our booth set up in their diversity lounges.  We have a standing invitation to Flame Con for a booth as well.  We understand that many other organizations try to shy away from ""different areas"" such as the LGBTQ and gaming community, but we are not them and believe we are inclusive of all people!

I'm posting because as anyone could understand, we need input and help along the way to help spread our message.  We are thankful that mental health awareness and suicide prevention are FINALLY coming on the forefront of the mainstream, but we feel like we need to keep doing more!   

I ask the amazing Reddit community today if there is anything else that you feel we can do to advance our message and keep our vision alive?  There is so much more that we do, however I would be typing for hours and I don't want to bore you!  

Any feedback and comments are much appreciated and welcomed!  Thank you :)

Aaron",8.620402397260275,9.893071409001957,7.795151051859097,67.61732540362037,60.93737769080236,9.362059686888458,33.97266389432485,9.354420925462401,3.252509246575343,2394,92,362,38,32,743,229,511,0.059000000000000004,0.815,0.126,0.9859,4,0,0,0,0,12,88.0,27,6,3,4,11,14,0,2,24,0,43,6,1,1,3,92,72,38,5,8,6,0,2,1,1,5,5,0,0,1,20,59,0,5,8,5,0,8,3,4,1,1,2,2,50,10,84,61,8,67,0,1,0,0,58,33,0,2,18,268,70,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219993330638252,0.0,0.0,0.0835249617646667,0.0,0.04698025374191421,0.0,0.0,0.08588183868266484,0.0,0.050537103501550384,0.0,0.05741222552258843,0.0,0.05769889256826945,0.0,0.0,0.03743637790064472,0.0,0.0,0.06919065017519639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023932921809904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21160509009072664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04903273725932366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052894337889202565,0.0,0.0,0.06416279940432737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05130210986526605,0.06908058976766411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040562255606515794,0.0,0.0,0.11736419964683245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621038245318027,0.04387297090970485,0.0,0.06727419050348094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032085400474885784,0.0,0.034902034500616456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3916705216222829,0.0,0.0,0.12349014294543798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06047876081304422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409850261275732,0.06094224767718062,0.10917217659287808,0.0,0.0,0.03375060287090194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672466115867437,0.0,0.0,0.030002955602250386,0.061551274350519526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490497980220581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3094458516101368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029023708551047,0.1366093627598118,0.0,0.059312397596866615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04161457476881633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21287783734305948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058816022914607226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040689123226346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040386031994675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840297371224527,0.0,0.4702257435214192,0.06968996856857712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049360893443234674,0.0,0.16962062904612146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039350532451580635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058211694931851375,0.0,0.0,0.04169493143785264,0.0,0.0,0.1278647738133516,0.0,0.053040523295749036,0.0,0.2026863696811755,0.03622257518814604,0.1949849521246511,0.0,0.0,0.055217047518093865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941779511076886,0.0,0.0,0.04362554736901959,0.0,0.0,0.03954751810194327
mentalhealth,fisheypixels,2020/01/06,"For the first time in a long time, I've got that content/happy/relaxed feeling Last year was rough, from a friends suicide, my grandma passing, the death of two other people I knew, lots of stress with work and money, and general life stress. 

But today is good. I had a solid date last night, came home and enjoyed a few beers while watching venture bros. 
Today I've been working on art, and I've actually been able to focus decently, despite not taking my ADHD meds. All while watching Altered Carbon for the ""first"" time. (First time meaning I've seen episode 1 at least 4 times, but was too drunk/with friends to remember)

But it feels like my brain is going a constant 80 miles per hour, but today ive been on a nice 15 miles per hour. Slow, quiet, and content. 

No matter how bad things get, days like today, however rare, are a perfect reason to keep going. 

A day with no obligation aside from enjoying the little things. 

I hope you all have a day like today soon.  Hang in there, a break in the mental shitstorm is coming. Dont know how long, but they're coming.",5.432644230769231,5.89766351442308,5.626923076923081,83.21807692307694,67.70192307692308,7.746153846153848,29.461538461538463,7.321109707123232,1.6819788461538463,833,28,160,7,13,264,132,208,0.087,0.73,0.183,0.9647,1,0,1,0,0,1,37.0,0,1,0,6,5,14,0,2,15,0,13,3,1,3,3,33,29,14,2,1,6,1,3,3,2,0,1,1,1,0,5,10,1,1,7,2,1,7,4,3,0,4,10,7,8,11,17,19,5,47,0,0,3,0,4,9,0,2,33,86,13,2,0.1016735754049377,0.0,0.09921874300564264,0.0,0.12219187946660813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489318855504112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350133562214937,0.0,0.11628748411370415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17516556483546014,0.0,0.10987301481333908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19671313467346427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191606731493098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028184293477188,0.07263562258462845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594504738984098,0.0,0.0,0.15710550429129244,0.0,0.053120246727010184,0.0,0.11556687194218156,0.08527897117954984,0.08131764630920359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198688608777344,0.10098480163571813,0.20025598238347567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037214543850967,0.0,0.0,0.055877138048844366,0.16575506829272774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181505315335601,0.14901771963655816,0.1019036331624011,0.0,0.17995582950507896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643923792781433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075233024597043,0.11293642160803982,0.0,0.1024630501280272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954137629606468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048765528874651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453736922634717,0.0,0.0,0.11517634085480125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232933474214406,0.0,0.0,0.11121438920394892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644587527193059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350948113643506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964333972792683,0.0,0.4818733055237643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993203094222982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480391476424667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547444906166802
mentalhealth,quicksandmountain,2020/01/06,Help at Home I'm depressed. Nothing matters. I feel like I need someone to come to my house a few hours a day to make sure I get out of bed and feed myself. I don't care enough to do it. I care a little that it's unfair to my family that I'm so incapacitated. Is someone like that even a thing?,-0.5161688311688302,1.284275045454546,2.5689610389610387,93.4377272727273,86.42424242424242,4.983549783549783,18.51948051948052,6.1826913282559595,-0.3076337662337658,227,6,56,2,7,81,44,66,0.299,0.628,0.073,-0.925,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,4,0,3,1,0,1,1,8,12,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,6,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,8,5,8,12,2,6,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,34,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44159507954790256,0.0,0.0,0.18654742229623636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13966340260091434,0.0,0.1865229684799403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22376455945378956,0.0,0.14303595859007529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20415366737849847,0.0,0.1094993355422434,0.15471063816421632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314375754129713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14515572592063256,0.0,0.217227521009227,0.0,0.21326815774623856,0.2498813755108499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21160073328929865,0.2170501959894217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455560391773895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605766318346307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20779533646147744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669814809584544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20410540980177647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438729629838418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Stoned4Good,2020/01/06,"Can't make myself to do anything productive, please help. I'm a 23 years old male, I've been told many time to seek professional help , i can't afford a psychotherapist ATM so i thought i would try to seek advice here.

Never seen a psychotherapist but I've seen a psychiatrist a few times. He suspects i have borderline personality disorder.

I've been depressed for as long as i can remember, When i was 18 i read that psychedelic drugs can be therapeutic so I've started experimenting with LSD and MDMA, I've also read that psychedelics are not addictive but i got hooked on them as well, it was my way to escape myself even tho my intention was to get better.

Lost my mind 2 years ago, moved back to my parents been here ever since.

I'm not regretting trying psychedelics they gave me many insights about myself but i overdid them for sure i tripped about 20-25 times over a period of 1 year. Now it feels like i know too much.

After i flipped i was sure i got rid of depression for good, Lately i notice that even if I'm optimistic i still struggle, I'm used to suffer and sometimes i think I'm even masochistic in the psychological sense.

The only thing i feel passionate about is psychology, i even hope to study psychology one day. I'm not working towards this goal because i feel that if i can't help myself how would i be able to help someone else.

At the moment I'm unemployed, drowning in debt, stopped smoking weed 4 days ago, I've decided that I'm leaving junkie me in 2019 so I'm trying to stay sober long enough to get my shit together and only then i will allow myself to smoke.

Been smoking weed daily since 17 and I'm so used to it that i can't really sleep without it, I'm sleeping once every 2 days.  
I hate dreaming my dreams are always obsessed with the past.

I spend most of my time watching YouTube videos that i don't really enjoy, Honestly i feel paralyzed.

I don't know why i can't change even tho i really want to.

I don't see the point in money, everybody obsessed with it and it making me sick, Every time i start a new job i feel great for the first month but after that period of time I'm starting to get antisocial and i get anxious about how much time i get to spend.

Because of this I'm always falling into the same routine of daily smoking because i feel like a slave and I'm compensating this feelings with allowing myself to be stoned 24/7.

If any of you who reading this are educated in psychology please mention it in your comments, Thank you!",4.222921146953404,5.47629982258065,5.43736559139785,80.61910394265234,70.93548387096773,8.494982078853049,28.697132616487465,8.920646497554287,2.242555734767026,1976,74,389,37,36,658,238,496,0.13,0.731,0.139,0.1462,6,0,2,0,0,0,39.0,0,3,3,5,27,23,2,3,15,0,30,7,3,9,4,60,79,28,1,8,11,1,7,2,0,3,3,0,0,2,21,12,0,1,15,6,5,3,13,10,1,2,16,11,59,13,53,57,6,56,0,5,4,1,19,12,1,5,41,228,80,8,0.07253042625327945,0.0,0.0,0.07906887050908623,0.0,0.07087589309909675,0.12858769327606365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05800255567022632,0.12070224986806598,0.0,0.0,0.04932317702652475,0.0,0.0,0.08193873670117031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05968636081361803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05577142075274587,0.0,0.1326416239227653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641472678984553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672757378465403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14032837392273145,0.0,0.12494069970414975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312615222769996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411226756747983,0.0,0.06058986423359631,0.0,0.0,0.07494331892469845,0.0,0.2395283124477475,0.06560792299135981,0.12222002466004282,0.0,0.0,0.07094867437333319,0.0,0.0,0.25671493966388065,0.10363150201521452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061694343518854076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894707706719592,0.0,0.0,0.06083508035848514,0.11601841531056298,0.07996505099913871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160877990458604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944624633672185,0.0,0.0,0.07203907877312436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197525642801213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972165086857366,0.0,0.08181748001669648,0.07679924883541588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086940522801992,0.0,0.0,0.12837428966948658,0.0,0.0,0.07917552816581218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682924546410812,0.14706893624055078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.073235054415472,0.0,0.0578930942547379,0.07708836463098917,0.10663641750793187,0.0,0.055939936085475435,0.07005033764111049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257637101778705,0.07610848142186888,0.07724253682270553,0.049148493931407404,0.11032531502359988,0.0,0.0,0.080536454957018,0.0,0.06923849884755243,0.0,0.06333077057540598,0.0,0.15923325509575287,0.06856469671493154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21765016205008536,0.0,0.13939454491667727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216283398337186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057797359177920525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445144025875937,0.1199958362109136,0.0,0.14516561371939524,0.0,0.061454794794274174,0.0,0.07173444616269048,0.0,0.15401222704237913,0.07730778390570663,0.057922892097240025,0.06063868404524255,0.0,0.07582454956382165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671813676275854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06677627172392969,0.0,0.0,0.04818599234775644,0.0464745684928495,0.0,0.05758105671787282,0.29605152375767113,0.0,0.0,0.06930593050814084,0.0,0.1477301952112704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12528600144549515,0.0,0.0,0.04278032460273008,0.05757127634640227,0.0,0.0,0.06521356375571735,0.0,0.06544742830745247,0.0,0.0,0.06991674265386473,0.0,0.05280301414559493,0.0,0.0,0.10304706762147564,0.0,0.0,0.1401216495110328
mentalhealth,StonchPigeon,2020/01/06,"Workplace destroying my mental health. Title pretty much says it all. 

The toxic environment in my workplace has been getting worse and worse since I joined. I've struggled to fit in and feel like an outcast. Today was breaking point for me, after being out sick last week I was ignored today by my manager. It was so obvious how different I was being treated. I haven't told anyone about my mental health struggles but today would be the day because I had some dark clouds over me and needed someone to turn to, twice I tried to approach my supervisor and twice it was pushed under the rug due to 'meetings'. Worst part is we had a small chat before this and I managed to say look I have anxiety, then before I knew it the rest of the office came back. I even went as far as sending an email crying out for help asking to have a chat alone and nothing was done about it. 

This is a small piece to the puzzle, I've already sat with my boss and cried explaining how the culture here isn't helping me mentally more or less to be told to deal with it. I've never felt so alone in a job in my life, I have no trust in anyone and feel like I just don't belong.",5.9066028392208665,5.48739307725322,6.3399141630901275,81.53148894024432,66.72532188841203,8.714295146913173,29.940244305051174,7.882392219407189,1.8735410366457577,909,28,182,9,13,295,136,233,0.159,0.773,0.069,-0.9594,2,2,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,0,0,11,9,1,2,13,0,24,4,0,3,3,33,39,17,0,2,3,0,3,2,0,1,4,2,1,0,8,14,0,1,5,2,0,5,5,5,0,2,17,6,23,4,30,17,9,31,0,0,1,0,16,14,0,3,13,130,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315177635377033,0.1233397701615014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550290930060994,0.0,0.0,0.15630283956730096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104488842026506,0.0,0.0,0.08594339177772578,0.0,0.06813328939784825,0.0,0.1902142184250593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783385608053344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24554579608785945,0.07208169975945207,0.11522883720781345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11677472088761652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437839903008035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382231013916116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302743712995884,0.15969546154639164,0.10731568014541246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058394641752016335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376102469913149,0.0,0.0,0.14983268715104112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091339575010499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911065782626837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894568567882608,0.1092092863398365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385773366594552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3379103152020585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216300825729016,0.08287522965026306,0.08620307279473875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724528240967032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210348364206416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565774571203093,0.0,0.0,0.11370916188907727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777662446931737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245639634043763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470143371529603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23369026220162295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31783157021684905,0.2135999642034483,0.0,0.07588375236562966,0.1215724775151431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896542768359639,0.0,0.0,0.10361089821458447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278041334872909,0.07939742599889077,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thrwaway11241,2020/01/06,"My father is losing his grip on reality and I am feeling hopeless This is a very long story but I will try to keep it brief.   


My father is a man who was diagnosed with several different mental ilnesses, he lost his mother about 10 years ago and his twin brother commited suicide 5 years ago, after several different attempts. My father and him weren't on the best terms 2 years before this and he felt guilty for my uncle's suicide. On top of that, after the funeral we were at my uncle's home with the aunt's side of the family mostly there. They didn't know that my uncle was mentally ill, since my aunt basically said that he died from a ""short and deadly disease"". After my father revealed the truth, everyone was in shock. Because of this, my aunt was furios and she blamed my father my uncle's suicide. She basically said that if my father spoke to him, none of this would've happened. This killed my father ( who was already hospitalized about 9 times so far ). The past 5 years have been a misery for him. He's basically died slowly inside each day. Fast forward to the past 6 months. He quit taking his meds and said that he doesn't want to  live. He said that he only keeps thinking about my uncle and can't sleep. We admitted him to one of those specialized psychiatric hospitals where he stayed for the past 3 months. 

​

He returned home 1 week ago. His situation is far worse than it was. He doesn't know anything, he's lost, he shit his pants the other day and my mother doesn't know what to do. I am scared, I want to cry, we have no one to turn to and I am coming to accept that my father, as I know him, is completely gone.

  
if anyone has any advice what I could do to help him, please let me know",4.267465986394559,5.288362125364434,5.292787900874637,82.57094084062196,70.60349854227404,8.282264334305152,25.370383867832853,8.59863814320734,1.6280652089407184,1351,38,269,22,24,445,171,343,0.244,0.715,0.040999999999999995,-0.998,2,0,0,0,0,4,41.0,3,0,1,7,6,12,2,1,13,0,30,4,2,0,2,39,55,15,8,5,3,14,3,0,0,1,2,5,2,1,20,17,0,2,11,0,0,4,8,8,0,2,19,8,42,4,35,33,5,39,0,4,0,0,55,12,1,3,24,163,62,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499163040804207,0.2312960844104232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597982852521406,0.0,0.0,0.0942381157480048,0.10568497430948366,0.05914644668431341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608154195521446,0.0,0.0715735759629774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053019568827650035,0.0,0.07400989982221226,0.0,0.09127561290481627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492184919787041,0.09119234841380844,0.0,0.0,0.06944300527226006,0.0,0.0955387032614892,0.11218423990346693,0.0,0.0,0.08827848700492351,0.1805340536777183,0.18174215295192067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831089919755582,0.0,0.0,0.08199293290815231,0.0,0.04397751844426578,0.0,0.08351029489463438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691230887256784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058297966671247085,0.0,0.17448740240254598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546159659540882,0.0962257062661662,0.0,0.23899780270377746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893852823086723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680112119517711,0.07697074212686701,0.0,0.09730354130000553,0.18988846370716114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661037609318704,0.0,0.1753020623033285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13884632009354764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787394694242832,0.0661489258839132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490843916067909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547318117632426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250934448265184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3309351654952604,0.0,0.08707783130290707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19651552936541386,0.08927928830429853,0.0719471834201966,0.09776431136919664,0.0870384953875994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927045051579369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854118400862109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539488905028595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055730505479413,0.0,0.0,0.05071621995803079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05905077924473313,0.0946045669617359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176404696695117,0.10260102210740654,0.0,0.06976664628124793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863565109946121,0.0617850294575589,0.0,0.10568497430948366,0.2240379519122876
mentalhealth,IIDE4N20,2020/01/06,"same meds different brands, worried i take citalopram 20mg in a round white tablet. I ran out so borrowed aunts tablet until tomorrow, its citalopram 20mg but oval and differnt brand. will i be alright?",5.486126126126127,7.703354729729736,4.847027027027028,82.27882882882884,69.27027027027026,8.176576576576577,33.954954954954964,8.841846274778883,3.085781981981982,163,8,28,3,3,49,31,37,0.048,0.8759999999999999,0.076,0.2263,2,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,3,1,1,5,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5275588711488218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5608788068717137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796549483530998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5127950093998076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Novemberx123,2020/01/06,"Does anyone else feel better after a bad day/week? I decided I wanted to kill myself last night. Not anytime soon but I got happy in realizing this is how I will die. Today I feel better like I realized I can’t live life only focusing on negative and need to chose to be happy and find the positive in life. Does anyone else feel some what better after a bad day or so, like a realization you can’t live life with the thinking you are doing or worse your won’t be happy??",2.6470360824742265,4.247922608247425,4.9531829896907205,81.14668170103094,75.49484536082474,7.73659793814433,21.403350515463927,8.472884824447931,1.2911659793814434,371,9,73,7,8,130,62,97,0.18899999999999997,0.527,0.284,0.9237,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,3,0,3,3,11,1,0,5,0,9,3,0,1,0,19,16,7,2,2,4,0,3,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,8,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,3,11,8,9,11,1,10,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,9,47,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18968444854596955,0.2779571947650474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22650647150084746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3598860877076989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749523873907688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14077228549851736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373979110514208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266186324909685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20575007282573105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12397195692530268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108483221385362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4331719997384187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500649026468857,0.0,0.0,0.11056421690423797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28741836478198585,0.13253312168107584,0.0,0.2395441555595684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057489856134023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12728839114590548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031598780424414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691225249203928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857029403939885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000363411950652,0.0,0.10880174735466046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13822813954196728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,quickthrowaway108,2020/01/06,"Think of self-harming tens of times a day I (24F) have self harmed since I was about 12. I’ve done it by punching myself, cutting, strangling myself, and starving myself. How often has varied a lot. At some points, daily, and during other periods lasting months, not at all. At the moment it probably happens about once a month, so is a lot more under control. 

But I’ve noticed I think of self harming myself tens of times a day. I can’t count how many. Usually it’ll be fleeting. Usually in response to feeling a strong emotion (e.g anxiety, anger, sadness). Sometimes it lasts longer. It can be thoughts, images and urges. 

I feel like any time I feel something isn’t going right, or I worry about something, or remember something difficult that’s happened my first go to is to thinking about self harming or wanting to not be here anymore. And that scares me. 

Idk I just wondered whether anyone else experiences this? If this is something that would ever go away?",3.482833333333332,6.099171394444448,3.9777777777777774,84.35500000000002,76.72222222222223,5.777777777777778,30.0,6.937597516519254,1.8893333333333333,761,36,130,8,18,239,115,180,0.163,0.797,0.04,-0.965,0,0,4,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,3,11,10,2,1,7,0,15,0,0,3,2,33,29,13,0,3,9,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,11,4,0,1,9,0,0,3,4,8,0,3,3,3,14,2,19,21,5,26,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,9,16,92,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489196025994978,0.0,0.08424890528307173,0.0,0.10921905180435272,0.07700523428906737,0.11284087372100594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347046147571956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235198028671316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420490681627267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270090088321567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199921776932557,0.1238810691872081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961860240195812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772796121398118,0.0,0.0,0.16705462872037585,0.07867666681759562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367625123971576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877677086408896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947746281472901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17954077926709436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05380379975451378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18725663470399534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165421199933263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758089229296691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538337287862078,0.0,0.11728451707384595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410814653826372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873842389877423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475546119461098,0.09405014667989188,0.0,0.0,0.11025902394893174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4595571068210784,0.0,0.0,0.091100410989689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33913283857707005,0.10892107149538677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21169996012988188,0.0,0.08743066589408402,0.1926525096209575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425845714122975,0.0,0.06495733979853803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943094229891099,0.0,0.11184203788138633,0.0,0.0782329663097502,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,silverfighty71,2020/01/06,People will treat you terrible with no positivity. I am gonna laugh so hard when that bitch is dead. Appropriate measures? Sounds like nothing happened haha. She and dead soon > https://mobile.twitter.com/star_shine0303,8.274545454545457,12.67907584848485,5.935515151515155,64.26327272727275,78.39393939393939,7.488484848484847,27.81212121212121,8.238735603445708,2.947004848484849,185,7,24,4,5,53,32,33,0.40700000000000003,0.369,0.223,-0.8734,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,3,6,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,5,3,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,3,4,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4924593988295625,0.0,0.4988675110288595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720702088756385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5343546755782146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3860800811675784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meme55x,2020/01/06,"diagnose help. hi

my brother \[28\] going through rough time right now. my parents went with him to Psychiatrist but the Psychiatrist seems not to give a damn and the pills that he give my brother won't help maybe worsen his condition. 

​

my brother for the last 4 years give up to try to accomplish anything he fail in study and job career and he went into his room playing video games/watching tv for the last 4 years.

​

recently he have false memories that are including with great imagination of bad things that never happen. 

​

for example he think that my father was in a fight. some1 looking to hurt him\[my brother\], today he ""remember"" that someone did something bad to him when he was he a child. not all of those memories are when he was young some memories are from the last 6 years. 

​

some of those memories are at start to be true but not like the ""Crazy part"" it seems that imagination enter to those memories and this imagination is mostly bad imagination  of people hurt each other or want to hurt him.

and those ""memories"" are constantly coming up to him  when he try not to remember or think about them.

he dont see those when he a sleep but when he a woke like flash. 

​

and those ""memories"" are not true. because every 2-3 days he ask us if we remember if something really bad happen. i think he had at least 25 ""memories""

also he have bad time to remember a lot of things. 

​

sorry for my bad English.",4.8260968379446645,6.787548757246378,5.164321475625822,80.38179841897234,70.48550724637681,8.786297760210804,29.57444005270092,9.339509955726095,2.730498550724637,1171,47,213,26,22,371,137,276,0.174,0.72,0.106,-0.9807,2,0,2,0,1,0,60.0,2,0,1,2,8,18,2,0,12,0,17,3,1,0,4,46,37,19,0,3,12,6,1,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,17,12,0,0,13,3,0,5,8,12,0,0,8,3,16,6,33,27,8,35,0,4,2,0,40,9,1,10,23,129,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04853038445835622,0.0,0.3945180070582982,0.4424390822082803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049939213949014384,0.0,0.056732998431017125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040204742814285,0.036993479165245334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05227541318437985,0.0,0.06557975310473871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03913729810806658,0.0,0.0,0.061594774193126235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112326478164031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05113037448715673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17464594701119152,0.03448911883382267,0.0,0.0,0.06690627030788421,0.0,0.0,0.10732844339331683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135277834640715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19489610014991746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06022125793559147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484009946340778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05929599898330526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096075861820868,0.0,0.0,0.05159286737965825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609670078056913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04680460323574229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738436051333256,0.06571676986341551,0.0,0.04207186849856718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03887685509736067,0.0,0.05991987189180335,0.0,0.274980567688877,0.05182531184930599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04835869780513831,0.11049208277344623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072959167514552,0.0,0.05141885187149508,0.09343773368805773,0.0,0.06793274565894546,0.042953696914950316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063385163369323,0.1166549637562924,0.0,0.0,0.07077271535180713,0.0,0.05752300955370938,0.0,0.0,0.08240330202543289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299750342383388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035794036594313135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251262454134896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4424390822082803,0.1172389292701476
mentalhealth,heartashley,2020/01/06,"I had some sort of breakdown yesterday that I don't want to have happen again I'm not sure where else to ask and want some sort of advice or coping methods for how I felt. Sorry if this isn't the right subreddit.

Yesterday I was feeling absolutely terrible, I couldn't figure out why. I live with my partner(it's complicated but to make it easy, they're my SO) and they tried to cheer me up, talk with me, play games - they did what they could and I appreciate them so much today.

I started to get a dip in my mood around 8pm and my partner says ""you've been so sad today, what's up?"" but I genuinely couldn't figure it out. They offered other things we could do, alternatives, tried to cheer me up. In my heart I was happy they cared and tried. I just couldn't get out of the down feelings though.

I had a period of 3 hours shortly after that where I couldn't stop crying. I didn't know how to ask for comfort or help. I felt like so mad at myself for being this way, and I couldn't stop crying to the point that it felt like I wanted to pull my hair out because I just wanted the tears to stop. I tried to just get over it and play games but I still kept crying. It felt like my mind was so fixated on how bad I was feeling, I couldn't just move past it. My partner pulled away from me because of how mad I seemed(we spoke before going to bed about it, and I don't blame them for keeping their distance - their health is important to me too), and gave me my space. It hurt of course but from how I acted, I understand.

My point of this post is I really just want to find some sort of method to avoid this again, or at least handle it better. I couldn't figure out exactly why it happened or what caused it. It's happened before where it's this wild crying and feelings of self disgust and hate. I have diagnosed depression and general anxiety disorder, but I have no insurance in USA so no medication/therapy is available - I haven't had good experience with medication so far when I was on it and had insurance. 

How do you cope and pull yourself out of those ultra low spots? How do you get rid of all that negative energy(not trying to sound lame - but I get all this pent up energy and it feels so negative) and try to move forward? It's unfair of me to put my partner in such a spot and I want to be able to appreciate and accept their helping hand better. Sometimes it feels like I just can't reach out for help or comfort, like something's stopping me or I'm not good enough to receive these things. Any tips or methods would be great. Book recommendations are always welcome too!!!",3.852380634904353,4.793366535104365,4.854807938868664,85.62478742499617,71.50474383301706,8.12613980204113,26.007949125596184,8.441846121484758,1.5329788091697014,2032,62,431,32,37,665,225,527,0.151,0.6459999999999999,0.203,0.9874,0,1,4,0,0,0,56.0,1,2,10,2,34,34,4,1,7,0,40,6,3,9,4,113,79,49,0,17,22,0,12,5,3,1,3,3,1,4,35,30,0,7,17,5,0,10,19,12,0,0,19,15,68,21,68,47,8,62,0,5,0,0,31,34,0,14,23,296,103,1,0.07357972132118347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190125209536781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06122422248780445,0.0,0.0,0.05003673365456055,0.0,0.056288285414151686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550155178266658,0.1375742138060844,0.0,0.06913057027756479,0.0,0.06143599387617538,0.08970703035022269,0.0,0.1252218468835557,0.0,0.0,0.13015056823191434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501942971830981,0.0755866422639111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749484047709892,0.0,0.3232954753351282,0.0,0.0,0.06337410615651347,0.0746818683000351,0.0,0.0,0.08432873528217939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061466415620227824,0.0,0.0,0.07602752122409538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197508629368089,0.0,0.0,0.2232247075394833,0.05256536761377695,0.28259228523798063,0.0,0.06725053227851703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19221183749657436,0.0,0.04181705127217181,0.12343035855595146,0.0,0.0811219025158399,0.0,0.0,0.1951989136906836,0.07832698155575822,0.0,0.07264474154791238,0.0,0.07821180302153062,0.0,0.0871923240381479,0.1479568086228898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724612039951945,0.0,0.07876861348632018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06540103709424652,0.0,0.0,0.040437490562170164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797366759112336,0.0,0.06497224196959063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04911503533778972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412382825180483,0.0,0.0,0.07429454331365509,0.0,0.0,0.15640719845893622,0.0540895613623133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024016972007856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13911323943247936,0.0,0.07046903371211559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396794278318566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0471370535947942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283667997552367,0.0,0.058513547668371024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675969647894135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05664526425298602,0.07277222581525294,0.08236647395855401,0.052080105463880914,0.0,0.05876086049389787,0.2460637668253329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06934801656498175,0.0,0.0,0.059140592847660385,0.0,0.0,0.08414482386707174,0.0,0.09776619473189124,0.0,0.07229170261341239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394899447229793,0.0,0.0,0.2997348052639585,0.0,0.0,0.07659908482359581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603953561204659,0.058404157930639314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13278850779765686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226892292123059,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CosmicPowder,2020/01/06,"In a really bad place, here. Hey, guys. I was doing incredible. Never better. Nice to myself for the first time in my life, for a solid six months. Changed my entire mental processes. Got a job for the first time in two years. Driving for the first time in a long time. Crawled out of the pit I told myself I'd die in. Anyways, I worked for all of two weeks, and now everything is falling apart again. Go figure. 

I have schizoaffective disorder, I'm unmedicated. Woke up one day last week and cut myself for the first time in two years. Just wanted my brain to shut up. Told myself it was bad, I'll just do three and stop. I did. 

Seems like everything is going downhill. One of my wisdom teeth is growing through the roof of my mouth. Some of the worst pain I've ever felt, and I've had all kinds of injuries. I'm broke as a joke. Know I can't afford food for the whole week. Having relationship problems with my long term boyfriend. His family is dead set on getting my lazy ass out of the picture. I spewed some crazy fucking delusions to them a while back, and now they hate me more than ever, and have doubled down. 

When I was working, I brought home cash every day. Now that I'm not, I'm back to being the house bitch. I want freedom from feeling being everyone's bitch. But I have to contribute somehow. 

Idk. Was suicidal this morning. Beat the shit out of my noggin, trying to clear the thoughts. Have a huge knot on my head now. Temporarily subsided my feelings, but I know they are on the way back in full force. Send good vibes, please.",1.5713725490196069,4.008390058823533,2.6507189542483687,92.08823529411768,83.05228758169935,5.560784313725492,21.091503267973856,6.923569853693429,0.4750287581699353,1202,37,250,15,34,382,179,306,0.14300000000000002,0.774,0.083,-0.9308,2,0,0,0,0,1,49.0,0,0,3,8,16,19,6,0,20,0,21,10,6,0,6,36,44,11,3,3,5,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,3,10,1,1,8,1,1,7,3,12,0,11,13,3,31,7,42,29,10,65,0,1,0,2,10,21,5,4,36,164,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22547626274904076,0.16322355789257398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644622422553283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911412411959788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339971233332974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607300331202387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144237001039166,0.0,0.11202257289985952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17682926826628434,0.08235315394365092,0.0933981478112213,0.17569119490322124,0.0,0.09214391710446113,0.0,0.09884414839819523,0.0,0.09384913329981888,0.0,0.0,0.3325624443878355,0.11819188494499365,0.0,0.0,0.09036233412979007,0.0510669690613187,0.0,0.11109982045666852,0.0819826497641773,0.0781744435328432,0.0,0.0,0.0967814786916139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650151669667198,0.10031307817695947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804474710499328,0.0,0.0,0.11278292987180245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699538826369858,0.0,0.0,0.1017848629583456,0.10743459437000147,0.07967403641554884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903915782557216,0.04775255981883435,0.0,0.0,0.17299992646809473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850250579042852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801796664165479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538584910057305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246711406220293,0.0,0.10400602537925907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021212029013968,0.10729306270657547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352737386959956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06261701903791378,0.0,0.0,0.10493998991492942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898205414554393,0.0,0.0,0.1003323463239431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171798191022421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691557593545037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759745821218712,0.28497524127471263,0.0,0.0,0.1867962956224426,0.0,0.06636145231901472,0.0,0.2864437280098401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115303352869304,0.07758427797532201,0.23521193267217774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912717953798114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14231693258830125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588727916577874
mentalhealth,dua3le,2020/01/06,"general practitioner offered me citalopram for me depression I described my symptoms to a walk in clinic GP who quickly prescribed me drugs. I was hoping to get a psychiatrist referral and my family was suspicious of this quick suggestion. The GP said since it was mild and I’m healthy otherwise, even a psychiatrist would suggest it. Should I trust my GP and try it out first or should I try again to see a psych?",4.500389610389611,7.014251506493513,5.4038961038961055,75.91155844155847,72.89610389610391,9.594805194805195,33.077922077922075,9.957137785484203,3.877576623376624,334,17,58,10,7,109,53,77,0.079,0.8079999999999999,0.113,0.3818,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,5,0,6,3,0,0,0,10,11,4,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,4,2,10,2,7,4,0,7,0,1,1,0,5,2,0,2,4,42,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591324133176381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3489049594886495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19871683065474136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836263702350746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559134719421945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571882282511239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988243283391685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28618911546226683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397484439037992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488765526288252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127113150892477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4085317498155039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137240737509006,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ocdandanxiety,2020/01/06,"A Video on what ""Just Right"" OCD looks like “Just Right” obsessions are thoughts and/or feelings that something is not quite right or that something is incomplete. ⠀  


🙃⁣🙃VIDEO LINK: [https://youtu.be/zMR4mMuwZjs](https://youtu.be/zMR4mMuwZjs) 🙃⁣🙃

Let us go through what ""Just Right"" OCD looks like to a person suffering from it. Additionally, see some examples of compulsions with Just Right and how exposure and response prevention works for it.⠀",7.1433333333333335,10.964292222222225,4.800555555555559,76.67500000000003,71.22222222222223,8.6,29.83333333333333,9.188382445141503,3.1164666666666663,368,15,58,9,8,103,49,72,0.07200000000000001,0.855,0.07200000000000001,0.0,0,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,1,0,0,2,5,4,0,1,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,17,10,4,0,0,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,1,3,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,4,1,2,7,8,1,7,0,1,3,0,2,6,0,3,2,29,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061100222716006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184584764979453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18324838382640105,0.0,0.17510019052077733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30097270291859035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15647415069876772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19060567115841112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.765196820544935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280250513024434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27592021807769823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226807702487784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21556052644720824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13046275479830635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,juliett001,2020/01/06,"Give me the strength I haven’t eaten since breakfast, it’s 6 pm. I suffer from depression and I just can’t cook today. Please Lord give me the strength to keep going",2.5225490196078444,4.416210470588236,3.0594117647058816,93.31401960784315,76.64705882352942,5.7098039215686285,23.098039215686285,6.42735559955562,0.4219921568627454,132,4,28,1,3,41,27,34,0.19,0.58,0.23,0.128,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,1,4,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,7,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,5,2,2,6,0,2,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,14,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985381251448908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6650074537331481,0.1969887205201845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30808644382972644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38047807919732096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867226776576929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285495378137391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Another_Slice,2020/01/06,"Meeting with coworkers to form a union has been better for my mental health than almost anything I've done in the last year. I recommend this to anyone suffering from the condition of having no power at work and feeling helpless. We're about 50 years down the neoliberal rabbit hole, having forgotten about the power of collective care. In the past, it was somewhat obvious that if you work together with others to achieve shared goals, you fare better than if you work alone. I think many of us are so utterly depressed because the world is on fire, we hate our jobs, our bosses tell us what to do, we don't know our neighbors, we're often estranged from our families, and everything is going out of business in town because of Amazon. And we go online for connection, and this is a terrible strategy. 95% of communication is nonverbal, and we just see words on a plastic/metal object.  


So I do hope others will look into how to unionize your job. Start that conversation with a trusted coworker, find a local organizer, and start having regular meetings. You'll feel empowered. You'll access a deeper purpose. you'll forge meaning and craft identity where before there was disempowerment. good luck.",7.265391705069122,8.438063718894009,7.529654377880187,68.68591013824886,63.88479262672811,10.623963133640553,34.854838709677416,10.608840637214634,4.091576958525346,965,42,151,24,14,314,144,217,0.10800000000000001,0.767,0.125,0.4601,6,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,10,7,0,9,9,13,1,0,12,0,20,1,0,2,1,34,34,12,0,3,3,0,3,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,8,16,0,0,6,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,4,5,21,8,31,26,2,21,0,3,2,0,23,13,0,7,6,108,29,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791176640805134,0.15298460381847304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328334042934792,0.0,0.1215540082822516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800871626626907,0.0,0.12569163765984293,0.0,0.0,0.2612776998671899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15060175540087994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722372950541375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116018566893633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327536040540956,0.0,0.13924929014248238,0.0,0.14937478166445886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135005667875882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16789573983499914,0.12389342826308755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14583456097758948,0.0,0.15701045545585546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671088433718382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931618144147809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117839719038789,0.12040461662894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12404048813166828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975631325278482,0.0,0.16090116581506522,0.0,0.0,0.14885848615511982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100737501231292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770696990797745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091019708833941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12910639310582922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464758793276913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.355357581111447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226072723125584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19024277253082514
mentalhealth,Yungboiniga,2020/01/06,"irrational thoughts are driving me insane  im 19, male

and i literally dont feel like myself anymore.

so i dont know why, but around a month ago i started to have this almost an obsessive thought that there might be something wrong with me. like aspergers or some shit

it messes with my brain, i overthink everything i have ever done.

i have no symptoms tho, the only thing is that im eccentric but i dont think that is necessarily related to that.

i dont have trouble making connections and stuff, even tho for particular reasons i lost all of my close friends and right now im alone.

normally, this though goes away when im around people, cuz the way im treated is no different from others. And i know it might sound weird, but sometimes whenever i make certain people nervous (in a sense that it makes me feel like i have authority), or when i see that girls are into me, it kinda makes me feel normal. Generally i kinda have a big ego, like i do feel better than others, but man sometimes, like now, i just feel so fucked...

but, as i said since i have no close friends, i dont go out anymore, so i kinda spend my time alone at home, i only see people at college

and please, dont start with the whole ""embrace your quirkiness"" thing, i have posted here about this before and people told me the same thing. like its not about accepting it, its more about if i have it or no.

So as i said, i dont have any of the symptoms: such as reading emotions and stuff, i have never lacked social skills (even tho like years ago, i was kinda socially anxious, well it wasnt too bad but it definitely fucked me up a bit, but im over it now. I think it was just a teen thing) i got no obsessions, and i also dont have troubles getting jokes and sarcasm. im also not particularry gifted in maths and all the other stuff (yes i know that im being a bit stereotypical and i know that all the people with this illness are not necesseraly gifted or anything like that), tho i have a creative and imaginative mind. also, i have always been liked and stuff. but i dont know why even this though emerged in my mind. Obviously, i've had times where i felt out of place or weird or whatever, and literally only those thoughts come to my mind, telling me that its somewhow related to this illness. like i had times where i have been rude to others, which as i know is one of the signs, like not knowing that youre being rude and think that you are polite. tho whenever i say something rude im aware of it, and i do it only to piss others off, and also all of my eccentricities are out of my desperation of attention. Im also generally seen as kind of a douchebag tho, cuz i always make sarcastic remarks and shit. I know that everything i say is a bit chaotic, but im trying to throw everything in here, that might mean something.

It makes me feel inferior. and now, here's my explanation on why i feel this way: i think its just the projection of my insecurities, like feeling of inferiority, but through believeing that im fucked. Tho i have times where i feel totally opposite, like i am the best of the best.

this is not the first time though, that i have assumed that there's something wrong with me. i used to think that i was bipolar, schizophrenic and etc. so i hope its like a phase of mine, deep down i know that i will be through this but it fucks me up for now.

the last time i posted, everyone was like, "" so you know that you dont have it, than what the fuck do you want from us"", like they were kinda rude. and i hope that you will understand my situation regarding all of this. Tbh, i feel kinda embarrassed about even posting this, but i hope you'll help.",3.835870737939757,4.986240269493845,4.962791213896704,84.04769868105207,71.74965800273598,8.198239682007072,27.198745579846676,8.622042349995798,1.8008518751774507,2851,98,596,49,53,940,266,731,0.22,0.682,0.098,-0.9982,1,2,4,0,0,0,95.0,1,8,1,6,53,58,12,5,25,1,64,15,4,10,10,142,124,70,0,8,27,0,11,16,2,6,6,5,1,3,68,35,0,0,36,2,1,4,22,28,1,2,21,19,92,30,63,93,17,60,0,3,3,5,24,28,8,22,39,427,160,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490235876191852,0.0,0.03665807152662238,0.07583062099032985,0.0,0.14637880893995067,0.06092232098362254,0.0,0.0,0.02489499927322378,0.0,0.0,0.04135712485689076,0.07261148475360725,0.0,0.0,0.030125632586021744,0.06517855842797962,0.0,0.0,0.03439484097221166,0.0,0.030566524055228108,0.0,0.0,0.031151092002522505,0.04124518346212663,0.0768366129940688,0.03237719636049679,0.11990082764655953,0.0,0.0,0.04086713392023877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03153493550144647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038248035336771576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037463151396235086,0.42904827162829706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04117957544010211,0.0,0.0,0.04082809533891178,0.09671813575344364,0.033114436126230724,0.0,0.03498093986732451,0.098703934737819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18510330731305724,0.05230616361075943,0.03514985002911439,0.0,0.0,0.03113912626183696,0.0,0.0,0.0565671905822575,0.16921959645571788,0.019126402565832118,0.0,0.020805424035391543,0.0,0.02927911925952983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02453787030787153,0.0,0.036721257146544284,0.1090813440141654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4745208567754929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03812206402365053,0.20119045042111103,0.029840770316694493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861606081370736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039962444330887484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661853559186416,0.0,0.0,0.03987733084664536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650733104075713,0.11089228652894052,0.0,0.02922051307889817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028234691115764456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717370105749225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024806831077496,0.11136949413674954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268984383584067,0.0,0.038248035336771576,0.04018508142480386,0.0,0.0,0.10518231796419453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03661835370107401,0.0,0.0,0.037639580577841975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031263413657695444,0.06964603257116472,0.05822501271703505,0.0,0.0,0.058344384991858914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515608940338657,0.030282885606234187,0.04114942818921477,0.0,0.07463540288046472,0.0,0.11273188391114147,0.07241338018939518,0.0,0.05182329432706933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16763165298746638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761003869797732,0.0,0.0,0.03199739620417441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728410186001232,0.11728607305959635,0.10790283972844696,0.0871890529905654,0.12808007883226133,0.0,0.0,0.03498093986732451,0.0,0.02485473242758326,0.0,0.0,0.03811068432599855,0.0440354541841299,0.03161794416906072,0.0,0.0,0.02159261049466672,0.05811616238878903,0.0,0.0,0.0329153902926781,0.0,0.0991002878386478,0.04087202364038965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005117966721388,0.0,0.02357463957133273
mentalhealth,zooyoooo,2020/01/06,"What's the fine line between not over stressing and ignorance? What is the 'good amount' of stress? 2019 was a shit year for me physically, emotionally, and mentally. My crappy mindset where I did not deserve to be happy unless I was 'good enough' for my own standard really took a toll on me. I never knew it was possible to cry everyday so consistently throughout the year.

Anyway, 2020. New year, new me. I'm trying to stop stressing out every single second I'm awake, but I'm also scared when I take 'mental breaks' that it's too long of a break that I'm just being lazy. As someone who has been told stories of people working hard hours everyday to achieve what they have, I always thought breaks were for the weak. 1 day of break is fine, but when it goes longer than that, I start to panic again.

So how much is over stressing and how much is not? What's healthy stress? How do I be happy without giving up responsibilities?",4.152571428571427,5.809357177777778,4.829841269841272,83.335,71.66666666666667,7.365079365079365,26.190476190476193,7.957251820313856,1.5175476190476198,732,24,141,10,14,235,112,180,0.196,0.7,0.10400000000000001,-0.9603,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,2,13,16,1,7,7,0,16,2,1,3,1,21,27,15,0,0,8,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,5,10,0,1,10,1,13,6,22,14,6,27,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,16,97,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132322135478167,0.09502097067405432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543993468840253,0.07364755458341785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845614438477626,0.0,0.1179959266300986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962158152950609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095480742331264,0.0,0.19156588689990015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24312945154605906,0.10229799372814463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246094535876823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106066479556246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23016723584666576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16789572542157227,0.0,0.08807569091871154,0.22058415931697054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13398545952256802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916975318835244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873984872301095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07315745966695553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433102081727098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172214789567126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675866457020696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082915507780992,0.0,0.0,0.09547372355816654,0.6540608276483615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586185840277999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906595843532427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912003376159796,0.12687696008707602,0.07753220044744344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008173850280416,0.0,0.08313670481063164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061718258841767
mentalhealth,callos05,2020/01/06,"For anyone interested hi guys, i recently done a write up of games that deal with issues such as mental health among other issues. Not saying it's amazing, i'm just a practicing as writing is my hobby. Though if you play games and want something that resonates with you and you can relate to, these might be worth a go. Hope everyone's doing good! :)

[https://theplatinumgrade.wordpress.com/2020/01/06/tackling-tough-topics-through-the-medium-of-gaming/](https://theplatinumgrade.wordpress.com/2020/01/06/tackling-tough-topics-through-the-medium-of-gaming/)",16.743466386554616,22.74474557352942,9.022100840336137,47.68088235294121,49.147058823529406,6.8268907563025225,22.94957983193277,7.957251820313856,1.484228571428571,481,9,50,5,7,120,56,68,0.040999999999999995,0.725,0.23399999999999999,0.9066,0,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,3,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,0,6,1,0,0,0,12,10,6,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,5,4,0,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,5,5,9,7,0,4,0,0,0,0,11,2,0,3,1,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16644826476957975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454163988031524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436051206540241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274644753411517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528781331804982,0.1996628504173132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23570433449948885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530332360734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23643476304331354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4969192415008402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398957722876453,0.2525306545897812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23504307203667865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893048331411976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832605050444908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23388034474147096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404065138342113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WinterGlory,2020/01/06,"Is this anorexia? I know mental illnesses are different for everyone but in my psychology class I learned about anorexia and I really don’t fit the profile... But I cant deny I do have a big issue with weight and I cant name it... if anyone knows what it is it could really help me figure out how to get help. 

For as long as I can remember I have always been on the skinnier side. I was complimented on it once in a while as a young teen and as a kid and it made me feel good. I never really sought to be like this, but I have had a lot of stress even as a kid, which may be a contributing factor. I’ve never gone out of my way to lose or maintain my weight. The thing is... I have this irrational fear of gaining weight even though I am underweight. 

I don’t work out, I don’t starve myself, I don’t count calories, I do eat when I’m hungry and I don’t throw up what I eat. I don’t seek to lose weight, but I do not seek to gain any even if I should. I don’t weigh myself because I fear that if I do my fear would get worse. Even if now the comments I get about my weigh are more concerned than happy, it flatters me when someone tells me how skinny I am. 

The real problem is that, even if I am not actively trying to, I am slowly loosing weight and even though I should gain it back, I am too afraid to do so. So let say that in a month I lost two pounds, I won’t actively try to gain it back. So over time I am getting more and more underweight, and I cant gain the weight back because of the mental block. 
Before anyone tell me too : I have been checked by my doctor to make sure my weight loss wasn’t caused by a physical issue. Its not thyroid, it’s not cancer, it’s not ovarian/hormonal.

I don’t know if it’s anorexia or something else... But I know this is affecting the people who cares about me and it hurts...",2.2139071618037143,3.121350182051284,3.966109637488948,90.58038461538463,75.38461538461539,7.328028293545534,22.935455349248446,7.753152298057669,0.7965773651635719,1401,37,328,19,29,473,169,390,0.172,0.711,0.11699999999999999,-0.9702,1,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,0,10,24,18,0,5,17,0,49,16,1,6,3,58,64,37,0,11,18,0,8,1,0,5,4,1,0,2,25,13,12,1,8,0,1,2,20,11,0,1,8,9,53,7,37,47,4,29,0,5,0,0,11,13,0,10,14,237,78,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061471953392729324,0.0,0.0,0.0502391967452139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033136561636674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17042158771223365,0.0,0.09007001093051853,0.0,0.06286426533967625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753229800200677,0.0758924876716172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05898512928549729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718620721024545,0.0,0.07561669658640388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119014186509475,0.061715126508587737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29277213854995665,0.0,0.0,0.07059306574140888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493979982024012,0.03735465654057133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15439166572967286,0.0,0.0,0.06196489673601579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864391516850777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903698976457638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908733406954245,0.0,0.0,0.15421771962777134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16240444936001006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554469403493916,0.0,0.036092788493248096,0.0,0.0,0.06537921505202393,0.0,0.16529993023819364,0.08064595950073022,0.06280796283130285,0.0,0.06990462582576269,0.04931376897057815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489021791098472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058968272682209236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395768173658165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867706904704136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05121731912003245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069073859519008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840887075460431,0.14198335122476868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368874493658716,0.0,0.0,0.058750310399284224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259612037857863,0.05687446736905494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462636495501195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696286186894401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12914428842462966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490808925106436,0.0,0.14516843148536315,0.0,0.043078532954724524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031587298112864,0.0,0.07216753007238061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05864047803904762,0.0,0.6297397869462064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05378366067080915,0.0,0.07528742915010936,0.05248041809501257,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,honeybunchh,2020/01/06,"i keep thinking that i get better, and then life says ha ha gotcha guess i’m fully broken then.",6.232500000000003,4.769273250000001,6.370000000000001,85.01500000000003,66.5,8.0,25.0,3.1291,0.5014999999999996,75,1,16,0,1,24,16,20,0.141,0.54,0.32,0.5118,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,6,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4123337412653298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24358073006403305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5135939397282128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4143977959381766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293050042967366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3707568910773362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987349785603248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shrugbeternowthaneva,2020/01/06,"The most recent chapters of my life have had me creating a cult for the aliens For a little more than three years, I have lived my life chasing synchronicities that promised a better life for me. I thought I was on a cosmic mission to help the planet. I was to make myself a performance artist to play a crazy cult leader (think Colbert Report meets Alex Jones) and use this project to open people’s minds to the nuance of being that is often lost is modern dichotomous thinking. We’re all in this together, and this us vs them mentality will be the downfall of our species’ unless we can help it.

But right now, I feel very alone. I have gotten so lost up the branches of the tree I climbed that I don’t know which way is up. There’s no more guidance, just little nudges here and there which don’t add up to the same type of inspiration that they once did. This has been common throughout my life, as I’ve been receiving synchronicities since I was eleven, but this is by far the biggest miasma field I have ever found myself in. I am lost and feeling hopeless.

While everything I have done has bettered myself in some way, I still feel miles from the shore I set out for. I am homeless, largely as a result of not taking care of myself while I trusted the synchronicities to guide me, but things are now looking up. I have a job and I’m set to be indoors for the majority of the winter thus far, possibly longer. 

I’m grateful for all this progress I’ve made, but there is a trembling child within me that is confused and does not know if she should even trust in her own judgement, given how poorly that has worked out in the near past. Has she finally lost it? 

I don’t know. There are no certainties this deep into schizoaffective disorder. There is only trust (a novel concept for an abuse victim), and I have no choice but to trust myself as I continue taking steps forward. That’s terrifying in its own right, but despite some helplessness, I feel that for once in my life I am capable of accomplishing the basics of being human, and may very well resurrect my project in a new light. And, y'know, accomplishing the most rudimentary necessities survival in the year 2020.",7.517261878932526,6.894810243436755,7.242500542417009,77.05947222824908,63.51073985680191,10.195747450640054,33.12660013018008,9.457814108942452,2.8150085918854417,1728,59,329,27,22,547,217,419,0.10800000000000001,0.767,0.125,0.7819,1,1,0,0,1,1,41.0,3,0,2,13,16,20,1,2,29,0,42,5,0,6,3,58,68,24,0,2,12,0,4,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,21,15,0,0,12,3,1,4,8,9,1,2,17,6,44,11,53,44,12,53,0,6,1,0,14,30,0,8,17,241,65,8,0.0,0.1211214256292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587559624196878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18082167465029952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422650547943522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716017334395615,0.0,0.0894589065144677,0.10461297664133193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751949381776376,0.09246952282055997,0.0,0.0,0.09187438887102192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20675471488626745,0.0,0.0,0.11198389295355604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120858395752224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13704024128644815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144380912138028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247235601485239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3610272237540674,0.0,0.2049151767249251,0.0902676781079548,0.0,0.08584432884938079,0.0,0.4463682418065656,0.0,0.0,0.09672897785942082,0.06823683569681137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302004635741699,0.0,0.10321940135840413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987307782315506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21773530377987269,0.0,0.0777476924288835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758655140002266,0.07087083105957613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524477091367535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093611882486422,0.0,0.0,0.1746013691218444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456263518918686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08163803925516643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372288067761505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791459805272278,0.13100494500919274,0.0,0.08115624752983727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229656280442488,0.08829068381944218,0.0,0.16869477399618218,0.0,0.16228492563690805,0.0,0.0,0.09191370259828982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744219493455609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13166074539321831
mentalhealth,r-u-f-ingkiddingme,2020/01/06,"I cannot stop eating Title is self-explanatory. Idk if this is the right place to be posting this but I stress/emotional eat and it’s starting to become a problem. I’ve gained a lot of weight the past two years, but it seems the problem is at its worst now. For the past few weeks I’ve been telling myself I’ll eat less, and then I can’t even go a day without eating way too many unhealthy things. I mistake boredom for hunger too which makes it worse. I have a vacation in two weeks where I’ll have to wear a dress and a bathing suit which I’m dreading. I come home from school and immediately eat a bunch of different snacks, even though I had lunch only like an hour and a half before. Or I’ll be constantly thinking about what I’m going to eat when I get home. It’s so hard to restrict myself. If anyone has any tips/suggestions it would really help. I know I won’t lose much but at least I’ll be less bloated in two weeks if I start now.",3.2627207465900945,4.071092346733671,4.184727207465901,90.37734924623116,72.76884422110552,7.293754486719313,24.76704953338119,7.447530270364453,0.8711763101220384,743,21,169,8,14,240,121,199,0.222,0.7190000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.9876,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,11,7,0,1,13,0,15,11,1,1,0,25,27,16,0,7,8,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,3,0,12,6,10,2,3,1,0,3,4,6,0,4,2,2,13,1,16,20,8,28,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,6,17,104,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06824013534435885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016571060325381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082657018775226,0.08538882492208386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644098531904344,0.0,0.10844062495228772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471620987966265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484238538799216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6160868253485622,0.0,0.11287808328953244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255792060150545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05242772997976716,0.0,0.1140602525422804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989216912668035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726120264130629,0.0,0.2013146118377604,0.0,0.09882264501884776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551486803275221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049025003011601835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226383324830948,0.0,0.08531234896226482,0.0,0.0,0.06698312248022327,0.1017372026604142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376738484896772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631923654340825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19158719357661452,0.0,0.0,0.10484238538799216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610572167439352,0.0,0.0,0.1920391201233934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428554947750624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569671185419347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155761408303522,0.0,0.09135312303704464,0.10468493233145812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205377473834346,0.0,0.0,0.08389548800000977,0.11494838636689145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770864476338595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666680529814248,0.06429899765615688,0.09859147890569336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940764784466723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965163492435286,0.2414795301312851,0.12219692726286263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673196799489713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226326628961746,0.07128439676084933,0.0,0.0,0.06462087334834855
mentalhealth,rattar2,2020/01/06,"Feeling sad even when everything is going great in my life Hi!

I am a final year student in India. I'll be 21 years old in March. Most of the time, I get a continuous feeling that I don't wanna interact with anyone. I continuously feel sad. Idk what to do about it. I has been 1 year since it first happened. I would like to point out that there are times, when I feel normal again, but after some time (2-3 hrs to 2-3 days), it comes back again. Recently, I got an awesome job (way better than my wildest dream), but I am not feeling happy at all. Sometimes, that feeling becomes so intense that I can't even work. 

Please help!!!! I desperately need it.",1.1251948051948055,3.3333140303030326,3.0159307359307377,90.23318181818183,82.93939393939394,5.58961038961039,22.307359307359306,6.868970318607317,0.6006995670995674,500,17,107,6,14,167,93,132,0.111,0.721,0.168,0.7729,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,3,10,6,0,0,4,0,11,1,0,0,1,19,23,5,0,4,3,0,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,6,1,0,2,3,2,0,1,2,6,13,4,14,19,3,29,0,2,0,0,3,6,0,2,21,67,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101966707662216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211836672255024,0.0,0.0,0.17405537494211515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938323717616305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575731960831444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163811941806472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20818490126289188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416395435911142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4781198081150752,0.0,0.0,0.17264166523888236,0.0,0.1340533680830885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823388126469406,0.0,0.08956696931343339,0.0,0.12604607201380275,0.1737531158281072,0.0,0.0,0.13936400408178096,0.1677667396430485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563508213740556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639238530628596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131661788418576,0.07699476096992572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685743421843255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441325814536833,0.0,0.0,0.16537331775274874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17299603933621507,0.14898170564734406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556096968686505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036726774719382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586913754491724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27569119646196605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509450719285034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473372577492083,0.0,0.0,0.11195359005257123,0.0,0.0,0.3044651743894736
mentalhealth,eihab01,2020/01/06,"I think I'm not OK I feel lost all the time. I always struggle to make decisions even small ones.   
I have no hobbies or probably can't afford to right now.  
I suck at communicating with people whether it's friends or strangers *\*I don't really have actual friends they're just a couple of people I text online from time to time and meet them IRL very rarely\**  
I feel like I have no personality or that I've lost it.  


I can't focus or put my mind on anything and I lose interest in things very quickly  
I don't know how to describe or talk about my feelings or thoughts sometimes.   
I always feel disconnected   
I don't like spending time on my own at home but I don't hate it either, that's how I spend like 80% of my time anyways, I also don't like going outside, though.  
I do think I'm an introvert.  


There's a lot that I want to say but just can't word it.  
I can't seek professional help right now.  
I acknowledge that there's something wrong with me I just don't know what is it or what caused it.   
**What should I do?**",0.09642090688819492,2.3920209439252402,2.058120456905506,94.42383004499828,89.56074766355141,5.226445136725512,20.0754586362063,6.775458762138228,0.25488771201107685,798,26,181,11,27,264,112,214,0.08900000000000001,0.7809999999999999,0.13,0.7999,1,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,3,15,15,2,1,4,1,17,0,0,4,1,40,35,16,0,2,15,0,4,4,2,1,0,1,1,1,14,4,0,0,11,0,2,2,13,7,0,1,3,5,29,8,16,31,4,18,0,3,0,0,8,8,1,8,12,114,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.1262329953271027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344610966913637,0.21526944861108624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644913409645768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13288445439839408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313017942222964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543855280863752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616255340113006,0.0924120980426566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19988056478337946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351611179460127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12771247083316584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670473688429979,0.0,0.12975481975428269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218157361276995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25278762912053626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471650433202154,0.2824151548190029,0.10997401888874524,0.0,0.0,0.08634627069201319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061289081399755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765511165072798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793586088905951,0.11294884790287375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394678665811249,0.0,0.0,0.13003871352555388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286889668973607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22093898299119666,0.0,0.10286924546373646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958472567453636,0.12793659346651132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352311907493809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397161691505827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593851411069606,0.16577246480209584,0.12709181373308429,0.102694376812769,0.3771432142757842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21346483129027907,0.07629764067114943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414307024863734,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garlicgroceries,2020/01/06,"Maybe it's appealing? Today was the first day I considered self harm again,

I recently saw someone bite their arm instead of cut themselves. Maybe it's appealing?

This week I contemplated suicide again.

Floating and melting away in a river without a care in the world. Maybe it's appealing?

I admitted to my best friend I would be okay if my molester killed himself. 

My mom has cancer and lied to me on New Years so I would have fun. She has stage 2 malignant cancer.

My job opportunity is falling to ashes. I was told to find a new job, maybe I should just stay in the country I'm in even though I don't know the language.

My significant other doesn't respect me. He doesn't think i'm marriage material, and he says I'm ignorant. 

I'm not the one with fucking cancer, but I'm acting like I'm the center of the world. What the hell is wrong with me?",2.0813415892672817,4.330168286549707,3.7902511179910574,85.80424148606812,79.58479532163744,6.8305469556243565,25.84829721362229,7.928766900206844,1.6310458204334366,671,27,135,12,17,224,104,171,0.22,0.6890000000000001,0.091,-0.9723,2,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,1,3,7,16,5,0,11,1,14,5,1,0,0,18,27,7,2,4,5,1,0,1,1,3,3,1,0,1,6,5,0,1,4,0,0,2,5,8,0,2,4,2,20,8,15,19,1,23,1,0,1,1,12,9,2,1,11,82,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499913268332064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15079116255986946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649897875435133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09266654814785943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490423616154736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313277685058795,0.12222051095571886,0.0,0.0,0.11101260321433933,0.13283677498610913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28517533748007784,0.0,0.15896892558969689,0.0,0.07896689021751895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019845275968804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5774136118090969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16828505906162786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775485586130174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736636615907758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187406801418734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426606425692702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498973957264606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174594933714848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531517528332598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571707995352187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920691457865459,0.14117223558010264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619894556083134,0.13729956031346474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525744244109545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385096189394313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20414294956127285,0.1570997207703566,0.0,0.09253003664192153
mentalhealth,poeester,2020/01/06,"Please help me find a good therapist (ZH, Switzerland) I've tried going to therapy three times now and every time it didn't work. I just felt worse after every session. Because of this I had given up on therapy. Recently I've been feeling worse again so I've decided to give it another try. How do I go about this so it doesn't go wrong again? 

I'm from Zurich, Switzerland (as the title says)",1.9301582278481035,4.201420291139243,3.4966930379746834,87.58149525316459,80.26582278481013,6.987974683544303,23.799050632911392,8.07648339933343,1.485340506329114,309,11,62,6,8,102,59,79,0.077,0.774,0.149,0.5795,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,8,2,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,1,0,7,13,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,4,0,0,3,2,1,0,1,5,3,4,1,9,8,0,12,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,7,34,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921557699159913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170875894067077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30879553948513483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265775100263354,0.0,0.1759507217377444,0.0,0.16748906901952773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17579208043208452,0.3124391175542541,0.15370313916375353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122829997482238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011557396099198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809393081147615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14572939859296724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4191294175618013,0.21276977352296653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21371150746586726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488322485364516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340968703683193,0.0,0.37349902314013095,0.0,0.20035736748147667,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,metalion4,2020/01/06,"I just found out the woman I love (who has BPD) was sexually assaulted and i'm dead inside Lost a stone this week, barely slept and just feeling like death. She was raped basically in front of her daughter while drugged and she woke up covered in injuries. The only person she has to vent to is me. Almost nobody wants to talk to her on a daily basis due to her borderline personality disorder, despite being beautiful, funny and being a good mum.

The way people treat others with mental health issues is disgusting. Guess I just need to be strong, get that water and calories and keep being supportive.. despite her disorder trying on a daily basis to make me turn on her as well.",6.477109375000001,7.2015487421875015,7.243750000000002,71.62625000000001,65.484375,9.525,30.0625,9.516144504307137,2.8366062500000004,541,18,90,10,8,180,88,128,0.212,0.664,0.124,-0.9398,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,4,11,3,0,7,0,10,6,1,1,0,19,25,8,2,2,3,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,4,8,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,6,1,13,7,17,15,0,12,0,1,0,2,16,7,0,2,4,62,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18064410731051775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272069389767057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.413507064873176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20920622421198634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121544128557864,0.12887748644171684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977988134266738,0.0,0.0,0.09425132784350494,0.0,0.0,0.15131059748473713,0.0,0.0,0.1987304610633024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917563034572544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18829027827661104,0.0,0.16034742367480145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881341159183986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19692743730004325,0.0,0.1628176521474781,0.0,0.12041811154710624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18180033272608487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337639928170805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13720199953335305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12506634507330985,0.3150358864808149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20471529037332054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14499833823823224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247946399913215,0.19622292544728606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640433838643287,0.14319277907747568,0.14470565081165188,0.0,0.1622008755119577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ipelix0m,2020/01/06,"my mood changes are getting worse again i first into therapy because of my sudden and rough mood changes, about a year ago. 
i got angry super easily and could be sad about some little thing for days. i cried about the tiniest things. once i had a full on breakdown because my hair was a little greasy.
it was hard to deal with for my family and closest people, but also for me. it took a lot of energy to be mad and then suddenly happy again.

now i’ve noticed that these ”feelings” are getting stronger again.
today i woke up in a super bad mood, cried for hours and wanted to end my life or harm myself. i was just too lazy to do that, so i punched and bit myself. i’m still sore because of that.

i’ve noticed that my parents are more careful around me since i can get angry about the tiniest things. it’s exhausting for me and them as well.",3.911509803921569,4.903751582352943,4.5808823529411775,87.45230392156864,71.41176470588233,7.0784313725490176,26.51960784313725,7.1686216300943375,1.1820196078431369,659,21,135,6,12,211,103,170,0.205,0.6659999999999999,0.129,-0.9332,1,0,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,1,3,15,13,1,0,7,0,12,4,1,0,0,18,22,13,0,2,3,1,4,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,11,10,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,1,1,7,4,20,5,23,12,5,27,0,1,0,0,3,11,0,3,15,98,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155467514309945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096602891355597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220719654438395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449518854673925,0.2507737575130172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497070001973272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980995843541902,0.0,0.2901240412140729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948462835002133,0.0,0.30125480251372444,0.08843547139417292,0.1413717569186365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145368407636505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927098635178536,0.0,0.06933545349527101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664002508390996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21492935186602236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967286545389683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459740773397219,0.12283871948225618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504232112652229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968567465922957,0.0,0.2748742482434187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658034069441088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.312239645889398,0.0,0.1460356155632298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15226313452034682,0.0,0.0,0.09506648907727183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343274397050986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950967628158624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15681649902678044,0.0,0.2733029497793965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998021610606034,0.0,0.1523529713624269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088096655466173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232935027496232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397439710614477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830519288893406
mentalhealth,bananawon,2020/01/06,"Do I have tourette syndrome? I have certain urges that I just assumed were normal or some sort of OCD, but I looked more into it and my symptoms seem to lean towards tourette syndrome. My ""urges"" consist of a few things; I get the urge to do this weird blinking thing that I can't explain that sometimes happens even without me knowing, until it drives me crazy. When I start to think about it, I get uncontrollable spasms in my legs (although this might just be restless leg syndrome). Another one is sometimes I just jerk my head to the side, which often gets a reaction from other people. None of these are life impairing, but it might be nice to know what's going on.",8.739010416666666,7.158550296874999,7.572187500000003,78.77072916666668,61.65625,9.783333333333333,39.30208333333333,7.793537801064563,3.0724802083333334,530,23,100,4,6,161,89,128,0.113,0.846,0.040999999999999995,-0.8467,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,1,2,4,0,12,5,3,0,1,22,24,7,0,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,15,2,0,0,6,0,0,2,3,4,0,1,1,1,15,2,16,19,4,10,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,8,3,78,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21231398521625425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373364273088895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3173564255605592,0.0,0.115071909653289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790490647338903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20779903012578704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22255128561264054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430149517647857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002904132844188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4295905737100744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983837192078448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372031360513581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403715262816294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18432675864482925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4005083447791664,0.0,0.14331372032110806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21045033353370896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690324254120886,0.12973859489472245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951798638630491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HanDofDooMEU,2020/01/06,"Looking for Advice  Hello everyone! So this is my very first post, bare with me haha. I'm honestly looking for help because I feel quite helpless, and it's not quite about me.  


I've met this wonderful friend online long ago, and we've been more than best friends. Lately, her thoughts/anxiety/perception of life or whatever u wanna call have been odd.   


Here's a bit about her just to give u some insight, she is of Moroccan origin, moved to the UK at young age. Her parents got divorce at that time, and she really lacked affection/attention. Her mother was working 24.7 just to sustain the kids, and her father did not give a shit. Safe to say that she did not have the best of childhoods. She also witnessed her father passing away which was a big shock, and I feel like that memory still affects her from time to time. She was also raped at age of 15, had an abusive relationship at 18. Weed and Alcohol became slowly part of her life, I guess they were helping her survive all after all the misery and traumas she's been through. Fast forward a few years, she meets prince charming, and things go great, but it was a LDR, so you guys can guess where things end up going. They date for a year barely seeing each other monthly, and her bf was supposed to move to London for good, but that did not happen, and he pretty much gave up on her. That was I guess the last emotional hit that completely destroyed her. She led a hectic life afterwards, including the abuse of drugs/alcohol. Things stayed like that for more than 6 months, but with my constant help, and after her meeting up with some good friends, she kinda stabilized?   


Here is where I'm completely lost. I thought that she started to get herself together and quit drugs (not weed tho). Right now, based on what she describes to me at times, she has really bad anxiety, and she will have really negative thoughts/suicidal thoughts, she would feel like she wants to give up on life. That's why what she does is always keep herself busy (was it music/weed/alcohol/reading etc ...), and that kinda refrains her from going down that hole.  


She sought medical help twice, and it never really helped at all. It just feels to me that she really gave up on life, doesn't seem like she really enjoys anything anymore. Sometimes for me it does make sense, going through all that went through will definitely leave an impact, but at some point life goes on and you can't stay in the past, regardless of how atrocious it was.   


Pep talk really doesn't do much for her, so most of our conversations are mainly just laughing about stuff lmao.   


I apologize for the long post, sorry if I didn't make much sense, but yeah I just have no answer to what she is going through. I'm a very motivational and positive person overall, but I just can't get through her.  


Thanks for reading and I appreciate any sort of help/advice.",6.081513221802485,6.692730561467893,5.947342147868322,80.97322045331894,66.3211009174312,9.274150026983273,30.52482460874258,9.247498795725024,2.495851592012951,2256,79,429,39,34,706,267,545,0.083,0.752,0.165,0.9938,1,0,5,0,2,0,81.0,1,2,2,10,22,27,3,0,18,2,37,11,1,7,5,81,78,33,0,6,19,4,4,4,4,3,9,1,0,3,31,22,1,3,11,1,0,11,13,8,0,2,25,8,60,19,68,49,22,71,0,2,3,1,76,26,1,14,36,290,91,3,0.0,0.15233041702329714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256338095373311,0.05698327407071365,0.20609791993340665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281467665688612,0.05348886203610041,0.0,0.0,0.04371485393251042,0.0,0.04917655480828585,0.0,0.06375176827662556,0.0,0.0,0.05289968534117896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060396284114349885,0.0,0.05367387721662021,0.03918650801181784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492273194469506,0.0,0.07018072330419092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564044495882494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479965117598544,0.06946741908142008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250951237575048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454822889180965,0.0,0.0,0.07231006940831879,0.056935930752756964,0.0,0.07169288114833577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06142545576881229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001428845700932,0.09184801641965433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054679349100697036,0.0,0.0,0.14899537331994747,0.0,0.06717075065907176,0.184999220300835,0.1826684272470168,0.10783557800478084,0.05141323394532296,0.07087257421096818,0.21244593398105668,0.06365058170776419,0.056845517126697324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585264786435761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057137957951999586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05239947594740251,0.07251437161342124,0.0680667415880626,0.0,0.0,0.2724312099145008,0.1256223092101602,0.0,0.0,0.11377740972714452,0.10796357741646903,0.0,0.07017282457163146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581921475946998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475867004661688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262064658511078,0.13664596657784409,0.14176688413862365,0.0,0.04957925021041225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137900631978626,0.06961255839874836,0.061365691467914485,0.0,0.05612970518197509,0.0,0.0,0.06076850443369128,0.0,0.12313127938196315,0.06539923468782563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051196331219652,0.1286014083168247,0.0,0.28827073302820866,0.0,0.0,0.0690162156312553,0.0,0.05489759394963139,0.0,0.05112066680960672,0.0,0.0,0.051225473833303434,0.05852110945693172,0.0,0.0,0.06598589207314105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357783551220067,0.071959900558096,0.04550005639578328,0.13703490671197585,0.05133673295249648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358900822196557,0.07031550554829168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05166848810847404,0.0,0.059183433439402876,0.0,0.0,0.1281209206744192,0.0,0.0,0.10206753236304104,0.14993645581501236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608092308605624,0.03791596068898839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959127071187147,0.058005687005525726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06971250558133645,0.04679901396719907,0.0,0.0,0.04566501775447094,0.0,0.0,0.08279268571667144
mentalhealth,skiislife455,2020/01/06,"I was a victim of gas lighting. This is kinda a stream of consciousness but if anyone has dealt with anything similar I’d be interested in hearing your story and or how you got over it. I’m at a particularly low point at the moment. 

I dated this girl who I met at work. At first glance I thought she was incredibly attractive and although I got some weird vibes at first, she seemed to have an amazing personality. As a result when she brought me to her place to make out and have sex a few days into knowing her I never stopped to think it might be too good to be true. We had a few months of a great relationship before things started to go down hill. I felt there was something wrong but I could never think of more than a few things that she was doing that where abusive. To make matters worse whenever I confronted her about the things I could single out, she played the victim or convicted me I was over thinking (I do have some anxiety ). My friends who knew her told me I “was too nice to be with her” but when she found out they said this, she immediately said “you know they have always had a grudge against me, there snakes” anyway lucky or in lucky she doesn’t live close and so after work finished (it was a summer job) I didn’t see her other than face time. We spoke just about every day for a full year over text and FT. She told me she loved me she even spoke about us possibly moving together and becoming serious after a while. I was infatuated. I’d always doubted myself a little bit(again, I have a miled case of anxiety) but when I was talking to her I felt like I could conquer the world. She felt like my dream girl. After about a year I traveled to see her and a few weeks before I got there she told me she was seeing some one. At that point I was in a mix of denial and confusion. Only a week before she told me she loved me and was sexting me when she stoped mid conversation to say maybe there was too much distance for us to work out. As a result of this confusion, I felt like she would change her mind when I saw her. When I finally got to her place and saw her it was almost physically painful to see her. She was the first person I’ve ever truly felt love for (looking back now it was probably more lust than love) and not being able to express that killed me. Anyway she did all sorts of nasty things while I was there and by the end of the week things had  deteriorated to the point where we don’t talk anymore. It took me about a  month to realize that she had been gaslighting me. Because of this experience my grades dropped going into my senior year of college, I almost lost a job, I stated to abuse pot and alcohol and became increasingly isolated. Now about a half a year after we stopped talking I still feel just as angry and confused as I did on day one. I made progress for a while but the problems I listed above worsened my anxiety to the point where I can’t do things. I feel really really angry to the point where I sometimes fantasize about strangling her or seeing her suffer (I wouldn’t actually do this) and that kinda makes me uncomfortable too because I’m not a violent person. I want to tell her I know what she was doing and some how make her feel guilty but I know that’s foolish. For some reason I still feel like she might apologize and a part of me still wants to forgive her and try again but then the other part of me knows that’s probably exactly what she wants me to feel. The thing that pisses me off the most is that the last thing she sent was a message about how she was sorry for how “mean” she was during that last week and because I still didn’t see it then, I responded by saying it wasn’t totally her fault “it’s on me too”. I want to let her know I see right through what she was doing now but I know bringing up the past will do nothing.  The main problem now is I feel incredibly lonely, I feel like I’ll never be able to trust someone again and it feels like I’m stuck in this time whole while every one I know moves on. I doubt almost everything I do even when I know I shouldn’t be.",3.9304142952795473,4.9081545606796135,4.829573150318044,85.74097087378644,71.35436893203884,7.867224640107131,25.49330431871443,8.16106018226119,1.3422741714094406,3194,93,675,45,58,1039,317,824,0.134,0.74,0.126,-0.3327,2,2,2,0,1,0,53.0,6,3,2,9,52,45,6,5,45,0,69,10,2,12,8,141,148,57,1,13,17,0,13,6,1,6,2,7,0,5,43,34,1,2,34,3,0,10,13,22,0,7,61,32,136,23,94,70,22,119,0,4,11,6,95,44,1,27,69,505,179,8,0.0967873884161442,0.11467722848225448,0.04722526467276352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05171814164623036,0.14537788288421716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053486063826057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106313082942763,0.0,0.04799354088086176,0.03383799619971985,0.0,0.03982388692326605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037211763681536,0.0,0.08850104044563188,0.05344703315335966,0.12353840822121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052833380218303465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05119411169728162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591528098322545,0.0,0.0,0.09362978776132053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04286244905891092,0.0,0.0,0.06392715722526297,0.04377486700248163,0.08154754914643443,0.0,0.04349313191079912,0.047338318957362034,0.0,0.0,0.1957544468753334,0.10371739443529206,0.2323276779221423,0.05301292653985786,0.0,0.12349095471436793,0.0,0.0530611878444334,0.037388848099407616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05500650330313607,0.04059033467846067,0.15481943242517848,0.0533542187091481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05454321051906098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960465484639918,0.0,0.05354045251892153,0.0,0.23936317859084685,0.07889463959980712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04948583110085005,0.0,0.14185628718089902,0.04850319507612495,0.042732518599306164,0.0,0.04063851487144708,0.0,0.05282743390255023,0.0,0.1747087937550168,0.04579128357025186,0.1292126666683288,0.0,0.04861797038660933,0.05271492009018714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267612392536636,0.04886383565867471,0.0,0.07725477002821847,0.10286967656649536,0.0355749334927549,0.0,0.11197260104963992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04643505477779557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837845890211937,0.036805585148618314,0.051494302646524916,0.0,0.0,0.10481130979253668,0.046197256982243404,0.0,0.12676652145205855,0.10112222074934496,0.0,0.2287384162547628,0.0545566189334322,0.0,0.0,0.1043531747871813,0.09261245929192637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06200447940210507,0.04975677760428681,0.0,0.05195671674499233,0.0,0.041327950435040735,0.09206697047268324,0.07696921602983457,0.0,0.0,0.2699445611178591,0.044055801666985576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041003820059026,0.037255830103358055,0.04786260099534008,0.05417277861583622,0.03425330584145055,0.0,0.15458906682899845,0.08091859056826331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669105485167687,0.04229822177627033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572049606488439,0.09302617559041447,0.0,0.03841918757311039,0.05643750452901328,0.0,0.0,0.18496899472806907,0.053767174900102695,0.032856141721763585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642331114780635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141754187252126,0.0,0.1552740097243194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0540298313448587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569355724877824,0.0,0.049317308786986695,0.03437749188249629,0.0529109076471374,0.0,0.1246558096816364
mentalhealth,RavenX420,2020/01/06,Calling Out To My Rapist In My Sleep I recently got hit with past memories of being molested as a child & I wake up catching myself calling him out. I slap myself in the head every time. I have memories of him calling out my sisters name & for some reason i catch myself doing the same. Theres the apart of me that wants to be hurt again & apart of me thats wants to yell for help. Im confused I never had memories of my childhood & now I know why but... idk my emotions dont make sense. I dont make sense. Like what do you about this?,1.6855652173913036,3.305144034782612,3.362826086956524,91.43554347826091,78.21739130434783,6.339130434782609,22.80434782608696,7.1686216300943375,0.6824086956521738,424,13,94,5,10,141,71,115,0.149,0.8140000000000001,0.038,-0.9137,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,0,4,5,2,1,4,0,8,4,3,3,1,16,15,2,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,2,1,21,1,19,10,2,17,0,1,0,1,10,8,0,2,8,63,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6160049388309373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4354015864600263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3331580428834271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988069021147913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975332929623275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367688340563023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586964200379968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095268870531428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215650249583818,0.0,0.15352821815627268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811267535789299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943908942013016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18974999472995568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096218660647062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568219734091602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613657517691586,0.1403393623070299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14223582093509266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287899679712281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676676572043057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825308218508735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,piksii121,2020/01/06,"Anxiety - how to deal with it Hi there.  Recently, i noticed that my anxiety is higher then usual.  I wanna look for a natural way of healing from it.  I would like to know how are you dealing with it.  I know I might need to talk to a therapist but I tried that before, and it didn't seem to help.  Im too scared to ask my friends to spend more time with me because I don't want them too think I'm incapable of dealing with it alone. I'm also having a hard time to sleep at night and it affects my concentration at work.  Any help you provide will mean a lot to me.  Thank you all ^^",1.18515395894428,2.7704324274193577,3.2708797653958928,91.68995601173023,79.56451612903227,6.767155425219943,23.369501466275658,7.686295010490155,0.9285096774193548,447,15,104,7,11,152,78,124,0.16699999999999998,0.748,0.086,-0.8051,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,1,1,6,4,0,1,4,0,8,2,1,3,1,22,20,7,0,4,1,0,1,1,1,3,1,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,5,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,16,3,20,16,3,9,0,0,1,0,13,2,0,3,7,69,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16287711463197416,0.0,0.12576322193877096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694428180681437,0.0,0.2406116394132284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701974345689367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586610908756092,0.0,0.13381929138238385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4863939658025336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150105939459492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408768229839718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108202445273063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16987110434394004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17285534328026486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683079336222451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206137284507705,0.0,0.0,0.1336994401165993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17130558876352842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683126741821694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660857528712967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14758073987081666,0.0,0.0,0.17904504991560358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15527831133787875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15744776993432055,0.0,0.0,0.14316639444962515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15737664560737247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264021003326583,0.0,0.1447867078272739,0.0,0.18259454775539613,0.0,0.10076782659552833,0.0,0.0,0.18340272403233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067713029350181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17320305595589855,0.0,0.09275783446879307,0.12482810663750625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11448938948111365,0.0,0.0,0.11171517432008196,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cartoonsmakemesmile,2020/01/06,"Maybe I need help Told someone they are worthless to me. Me being 'their only friend'. I don't think I'm mentally stable anymore. I tried posting this kind of texts over and over on Reddit to seek some kind of I don't know, help. They always get removed, for some reason. Anyway. For most of the time I'm fine, just very distant and locked within myself. I tend to be lonely, but I enjoy it the most. Pessimistic and quite depressed, I hear a lot. I've come to a point where I'm extremely disinterested in almost everything. The part with the friend, I told them it would've been better if they killed themselves some years ago. And some other stuff that I think crosses the line of decency here. But I was so happy, so empowered by the fact that I FINALLY told them how I feel. They mistreated me, broke me and it was high-time I make them suffer too. I was so happy I smiled all the time that day. I didn't know I could be so cruel and just terrible, honestly, and it makes me feel so good. The hate, the breakdowns and the screaming I just had to restrain - I can finally let it go, because the suffering of others that did me wrong is so, so satisfying. The darkest thought I had was to kill. I think about that a lot. I don't know how I got to this point, over the years I just grew more and more vengeful and angry, self-destructive and hateful. For the record, I think I need some help.",1.7707857142857153,3.961892221428574,2.975714285714286,91.53928571428571,80.35714285714286,6.0,21.42857142857143,7.1686216300943375,0.5723928571428569,1082,32,229,14,28,348,142,280,0.222,0.614,0.165,-0.9734,1,2,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,8,2,18,25,5,0,17,0,20,0,0,5,2,51,48,23,2,4,7,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,15,13,0,1,11,0,0,5,4,14,0,0,14,4,41,11,24,29,13,23,0,6,0,0,17,9,0,11,8,161,56,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946588994939972,0.0,0.10693024951562592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885408741590234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590251831393444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509544746074514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444309373803356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919862497180177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852595296636819,0.0,0.0,0.068867811036888,0.0,0.091974191578459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959719185993735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798791105406796,0.0,0.0,0.23395658335354524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16500441925773288,0.0,0.05579101446227051,0.0,0.06068865847913309,0.08956660798012835,0.0854061165150376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22735029318062605,0.0,0.2108571396587224,0.0,0.0,0.12035501538080973,0.0,0.21472820189386496,0.11282473988143095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362846603669729,0.22240132381973185,0.17605954842496405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091954050118408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815704207144131,0.0,0.0,0.1425602961053005,0.0,0.10728038408408774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761466415844834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836018501893326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08121518195401456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563828643489188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20189362044908085,0.0,0.10227098731744186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135795199122396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979327540264062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140056180079014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047900457108972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224384517642255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27369533714532784,0.0,0.08477575608909206,0.12453496339879283,0.0,0.0,0.3061143540178554,0.0,0.07250034247424787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810921801520563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585735281984521,0.11675317684972715,0.0,0.13753271716832308
mentalhealth,uberprioritymail,2020/01/06,"How do you move forward from being utterly bored with life? Hi! I've had clinical depression for half my life (maybe more). I have been in therapy for years and go back and forth with taking medication. I haven't taken medication for my depression in years and am considering trying a new one. Anyway, I am struggling very much so in that I am utterly bored with life. I don't even want to get out of bed because every day is the same. I wake up the same hour, go to the a gym, go to work, come home, shower, and then off to bed. I have a small business, but it's been hard getting it off the ground. My SO is not interested in living together, marriage, or children so our relationship is very predictable. There is no area of growth in any respect. Not saying you need those to grow, but our relationship is immature and pitiful. We hang out on the weekends, go to a dinner and movie, and that's it. I have a few friends, but none I am particularly close to because we just have different paths in life. There is no spontaneity anywhere in my life. I'm looking for another job and aiming to leave this relationship. But when it comes to taking steps to change my routine, it feels like my feet are stuck in mud. And it makes for a miserable existence. I am at I gym now and can barely focus. Every day just feels the same. Uninspiring. Sad.

What are the small ways I can shake things up to better my mental health? Any assistance is appreciated. Thank you.",2.8742429149797566,4.9987784877192984,4.252719298245616,84.09640688259113,76.40350877192982,7.753036437246964,24.99662618083671,8.617729084823388,1.780120107962213,1139,40,229,24,26,376,154,285,0.13699999999999998,0.777,0.087,-0.8529,3,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,4,3,0,2,13,15,0,3,13,0,27,12,2,2,0,38,47,21,0,2,9,0,3,1,1,0,9,1,4,1,12,20,1,0,2,3,0,13,7,9,0,2,5,5,26,6,38,41,7,46,0,5,1,0,15,22,0,1,13,158,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15117040702364454,0.1165495288585354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546680165133684,0.0,0.13551092667786072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830235177723208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175810162504866,0.1914902259244259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433639564043588,0.0,0.19146512417415992,0.0,0.0,0.11612715883734513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341293620834702,0.0,0.18729583117043128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240065525141137,0.07940494349992312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587352354034221,0.0,0.11614164069828893,0.0,0.2526743933760616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995677670226215,0.0,0.0,0.11814630205923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149161581285247,0.0,0.1094594800791768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029833706781003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176908545379846,0.0,0.0,0.3925395030132913,0.05430183880937963,0.0,0.09814669690061324,0.0,0.09333725538105167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419289130913961,0.0,0.11166421638286056,0.0,0.0,0.2239420615329226,0.1120121562497296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813390945788844,0.08170738185391163,0.08241565369734181,0.0,0.10734849914124163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531751075376211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579976301985095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839023025055973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11619717859803745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714058999624856,0.0,0.0,0.10233116340619464,0.12710868939542325,0.0,0.07384252713619048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546294692168888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341930577099536,0.0655586224638418,0.08822498673875022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091787291167593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14315276013151665
mentalhealth,what-s-up,2020/01/06,"When it comes to mental health, every action counts! Mental Health: Every Action Counts is the theme of the 10th annual Bell Let's Talk Day

[http://crweworld.com/article/news-provided-by-pr-newswire/1368612/when-it-comes-to-mental-health-every-action-counts-join-in-the-10th-anniversary-bell-lets-talk-day-on-january-29-to-discuss-how-we-can-all-make-a-difference](http://crweworld.com/article/news-provided-by-pr-newswire/1368612/when-it-comes-to-mental-health-every-action-counts-join-in-the-10th-anniversary-bell-lets-talk-day-on-january-29-to-discuss-how-we-can-all-make-a-difference)",79.285,101.33281592592593,28.56101851851852,-97.6829166666666,-73.22222222222223,5.662962962962964,10.453703703703702,7.1686216300943375,-0.13380740740740735,558,1,19,2,4,95,21,27,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,89.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016788741498227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26990010100094464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574900918958944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350714689977605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5931327912246853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426493761395956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18623620013582032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5623373878785513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33637721758657296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,purple-jellies,2020/01/06,"Finally found one issue I can fix and taking steps now!! I’ve been very down these last few days, since around Christmas. And I’m always slightly down, but this was a lot worse than I’ve had in the past.

So I was scrolling through TikTok of all places and one mentioned how bad being emotionally dependent on your significant other can be. Then it clicked in my mind that I was messing myself up, haha

After researching it a little online, I’m taking steps to better myself and my already good relationship and I’m proud of myself for finally realizing something and being able to take my own emotions into my hands again!

I know this isn’t too big or helpful for anyone else, but I’m really feeling better and I wanted to share!",6.890585106382978,6.873910496453902,7.351835106382983,73.74562500000002,64.60283687943263,9.603191489361704,31.809397163120565,9.188382445141503,2.7579992907801425,584,20,103,9,8,192,97,141,0.057,0.74,0.203,0.9714,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,3,6,8,0,0,3,1,11,1,1,2,1,22,22,13,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,2,0,2,6,3,13,6,18,13,4,22,0,0,1,0,5,11,0,3,9,74,20,1,0.15562356747786218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17173447653697335,0.0,0.1294912748856445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881561680869524,0.15945473562342774,0.0,0.13853796916759706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12993917844325872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27527279763820195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036432660670437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300035214477351,0.35011113410612704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868795168181647,0.0,0.0,0.34095602270423103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063320918340505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052966489028206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431119687639814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243057217471596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552664277794096,0.1268539782953194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15597569839093198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230559191824107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15713543986039652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21090911378516397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14856030433132555,0.0,0.0,0.16259350522647248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969644229550984,0.0,0.0,0.16708147097693132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873342318726042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980662532406175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3510286654542425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840574138769695,0.09179081216604308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15859371055326474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,qiankgs,2020/01/06,"I think I'm having a breakdown I say ""think"" because I've never quite experienced one like this. Over the past year or two I've lost eight relatives and two classmates, in addition to almost being burned out of my home a second time. Five days ago my favorite aunt died of ovarian cancer. That was the straw that broke the camel's back and I've been regressing ever since. 

I'm so paranoid about losing people I pushed away my three best friends, lashing out and telling them in no uncertain terms that I do not want them in my life. I'm so afraid of losing anything else that I've resorted to locking myself in my room and crying for days. I'm too anxious to be around people at all and I can't even bring myself to brush my teeth or eat. I don't know what to do, it feels like everything is falling apart. I have no friends, my family are all dying, and I'm alone. I don't want to let anybody in, but living like this is hell. Is there anything that can help? Is this even a breakdown? What the hell is happening to me?",2.8359104981705627,4.411714870813404,3.827672389529977,89.51723613847456,74.93301435406698,6.8315226569096525,24.255840135097102,7.510576382923642,0.9980405854207716,804,25,170,10,17,259,122,209,0.18600000000000005,0.7240000000000001,0.09,-0.9458,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,2,5,11,14,2,2,7,0,19,4,1,0,4,26,33,11,2,2,4,1,1,3,2,0,2,1,2,0,11,10,1,0,4,0,0,3,7,8,0,7,3,4,20,6,23,27,4,26,2,4,0,0,8,13,2,4,13,111,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970432192339685,0.0,0.13522249973104056,0.1398601412927941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525561376237731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22225191749665907,0.1202137378271022,0.0,0.0,0.12687400565347215,0.10383699923100878,0.0,0.08231879348103707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417155683214122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833449153074135,0.17417854351966305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802992519479009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13817906688345266,0.1128081300586396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783845622703957,0.12215091093705915,0.0,0.0,0.12136474754129133,0.0,0.12730317239869332,0.0,0.06828000186855668,0.09647220789630244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20866228349573565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941493697943502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051409479346904,0.0,0.1354555757526935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421414846713645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808698372752576,0.09538235498460154,0.1979203580483014,0.0,0.11924230571035555,0.0,0.0,0.3021491988094591,0.14741150837301165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415074641978184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150622411406878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289104321631529,0.18723869895149575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363107418486076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738878831570853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170602599130874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803042875484385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17305564992679096,0.0,0.0,0.07874258748567475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638278353778649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929952914664747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696097640539573
mentalhealth,Savenar,2020/01/06,"To everyone who wants to discover themselves Ahem. A few days ago being the bored gamer I am I was searching through the play store looking for something to play. Then I came across this game titled Alter Ego in bold capital letters. It claimed to be a 'self-discovery clicker game'. That caught my attention and I decided to play it. And I was taken aback because of its accuracy. It made parts about me clear which I didn't know existed or the ones I buried long ago. I literally spent some time in shock. So little by little I played it and I just completed it moments ago. I strongly urge people to play it and support the developer. Its such a great game for anyone who wants an insight on themselves. Besides, It has the best BGM in a game I've ever seen. Here's the link :

[ALTER EGO](https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.caracolu.alterego)

Have fun and enjoy the journey!!",3.506242424242424,6.379576139393944,4.004393939393939,82.67992424242425,78.51515151515152,7.06060606060606,27.34848484848485,8.167268648758528,2.1605757575757583,713,30,126,14,18,224,111,165,0.027999999999999997,0.752,0.22,0.9836,0,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,6,14,0,0,12,0,8,0,0,1,2,19,19,8,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,14,6,0,0,5,9,2,3,1,2,0,1,9,2,13,12,17,8,4,19,0,0,2,0,7,7,0,2,9,81,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4997113282190021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13139069845502552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11454789313878172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19719943757341785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149184196924125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19701954603093425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118608853733437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699749097518821,0.0,0.17955558942085156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071708980738995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327015239791547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3766693890937416,0.0,0.166294003118393,0.15779666211968485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177804521755261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733234706320565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034876876034028,0.0,0.13027279416990709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960306003957084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466192117021714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21323748503727316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095715463669671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216677950455128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheVixenJush,2020/01/06,"Help me I feel like everyone’s watching me and can hear what I’m saying. 


I know that I’m being filmed and people are watching my show. I’m scared and it’s making me anxious and I want help cuz I’m anxious. Everyone knows me and they want to make money off of my name but won’t allow me to cash my check. It’s hard for me to read because executives are trying to give me brain fog so I can’t break free 


Who can I get to help me if everyone’s working together . Only thing they said I had last time is BPD but now I know what’s really happening and know one is helping  me escape . I don’t when BPD anyway",0.10601503759398412,2.0400039248120336,2.7540977443609047,92.2376127819549,84.93984962406014,5.905263157894738,19.274436090225567,7.1686216300943375,0.3196406015037594,474,13,109,7,14,165,77,133,0.051,0.768,0.18100000000000002,0.9413,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,1,4,3,0,1,0,0,11,1,1,4,0,21,29,12,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,7,6,0,0,5,3,4,0,3,1,0,1,2,7,22,3,8,25,0,6,0,0,2,0,12,1,0,1,5,63,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213417713508668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669748501990293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3582483922700327,0.1587672891842065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4076989352879777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191194366231568,0.101603746182861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430535973356253,0.1364327327991592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576684220125414,0.0,0.12740337921870654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602950367510769,0.0,0.38131483932667537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.312646954743164,0.11593027834045964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948270478469873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18986917853933646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637361237789382,0.10816658146628352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859913885419663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422609366943834,0.0,0.0911113428225726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528611787824352,0.1131010000584058,0.14238948263593473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944862757147329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293105389767767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655970733420914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16777297088362364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353963693687264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RedheadWaifu,2020/01/06,"Help, am I going insane? I'm 17, I've tried writing this like 3 times and I've never been happy with it but nobody will see this anyway so it doesn't matter. I'm diagnosed bipolar 2 but that's probably worsened to normal bipolar at this point. I don't really know what to say here, it's incredibly difficult to convey myself in this state. It is 3am and I'm not even slightly tired. I haven't fully slept in days. 

I hear voices every now and then. They're always women just *talking*, never aimed at me. It doesn't really worry me, I know they're not real, but what if it I get to the point I don't realize this? Come to think of it, I've only heard them the past few days and during my hypo/manic episodes in the past. I want it to get worse, I want to go fully insane and just quit this taunting. 

I suffer from severe dissociation. Half the time I'm not even here. Right now I can't feel my body, but I know it's on fire. I've attempted suicide so many fucking times, I've been on the literal cusp of death so many times, and that seriously messes with me. I am not about to attempt again I should clarify. Just stating as it is unfortunately haunting me. 

I think I might be having an episode. I do not take medication as I had previously abused pills heavily, nearly died (on purpose lol), and gave myself ptsd to the point I cannot take the meds. I seriously think I need to be medicated though because when I have an episode they hit *hard*. I get super anxious and afraid, jumpy and wired, and sometimes I straight up disconnect from reality and become a complete mess. Kind of like now I think. Fuck.

Honestly I don't know what I was trying to accomplish writing this. I'm super not here right now. with any luck tomorrow I'll be fine, because it's literally the end of Christmas break and I'm too fucked for school.",1.7153334786399306,3.874834228494628,3.747210113339147,86.10432868352224,80.37096774193549,6.6022667829119435,22.41964545190352,7.730073105063049,1.0738873002034288,1431,46,294,24,37,486,188,372,0.204,0.688,0.10800000000000001,-0.9915,0,0,0,0,1,1,49.0,0,0,2,6,21,19,3,1,11,1,25,12,2,0,2,53,60,25,3,6,14,0,3,2,0,3,7,4,0,1,23,16,0,0,10,0,0,3,16,10,0,1,7,8,37,9,34,46,1,41,0,1,1,3,11,16,3,3,21,178,60,2,0.0,0.1165753857588422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818678875500781,0.0,0.0,0.06690818629866231,0.0,0.0,0.11115205043119307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199545665872096,0.10866339533977623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092884763902673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475378192585313,0.10315944538899642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269060855556977,0.0,0.0,0.09986320034092556,0.10211269462384354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714383142568656,0.0,0.0,0.12997058112813364,0.0,0.08289733825320685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049748652065723833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27287832775045817,0.15421324886010224,0.0,0.11183396087742724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473737774981436,0.08813760360186605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089203830504488,0.0,0.06594836095043917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245745074302393,0.2162890304281468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961362112850468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19950287832101926,0.0,0.0,0.1092884763902673,0.19823399920869045,0.0,0.10437563684820368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295451563671844,0.1517679878216056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640075131913177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482959509165392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18784768780974698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790294407949547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060804465453052,0.0,0.11501197846901225,0.0,0.0,0.10464926977014813,0.0,0.11198871149627553,0.12606157649153685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804807121172133,0.0,0.07824322377674216,0.0,0.09957535589321027,0.07840363716569533,0.0,0.0,0.11115205043119307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730966205407936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107622067139309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479532132474604,0.07908169688658206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25217589574145155,0.09666711539762617,0.0,0.2294866713753626,0.11308417608362055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13359992899913795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160652699601005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991924207372672,0.10026723478620796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Faggot-with-freetime,2020/01/06,"A post about awareness: Very recently I just started talking to this new person who I had met online, everything seemed to be going well until they started to send what they said were memes, but instead sent extremely disturbing and stomach churning (at least for me) images and videos.

Here is an imgur link to our conversation (I have censored all private information and have left out all of the disturbing images):
https://imgur.com/gallery/bTZfFig

I wanted to make this post to share with people how situations like these can be handled, and how being in this type of position isn’t in any way a must.

Being in this state of mental health, and then advocating that it is okay and normal is not healthy at all, and it CAN be helped. Never should you ever feel helpless, or like there is nothing that can be done.

I wanted to share our conversation so that people can see what type of things to look for, especially when communicating with friends and family. It may see impossible, but there is always going to be light at the end of the tunnel, sometimes people can get their vision clouded, and that hinders there ability to see that light, but there is help for that too.

I know that these things can be changed, because I once went through the exact same things as well, yet here I am, standing taller than ever before.

If you know anyone like this, I would strongly recommend that you talk to them about seeking professional help, or at least get them to try to see a different point of view. But the most important thing to remember is that you can’t help someone who doesn’t want to be helped, so if they really are pushing back in every way, it may be best to not be so persistent about it.

If you or anyone else doesn’t feel comfortable talking to ‘professionals’ about their situation for whatever reason, remember that there will always be people who are there to listen and to understand.",12.547031077804716,8.756154260744985,10.973982808022921,64.20048049371832,56.53581661891118,14.17685695393432,42.31893321578136,11.807384569943707,4.791499272647124,1523,54,266,30,13,476,178,349,0.051,0.789,0.16,0.9909,1,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,2,5,7,3,28,15,0,2,9,1,43,2,1,4,8,58,69,29,0,10,13,0,2,3,1,6,1,2,0,1,31,13,0,0,11,1,0,6,7,3,2,0,7,12,24,12,48,44,8,37,0,1,6,0,37,12,0,10,16,210,55,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15610662628958702,0.0,0.0,0.0637906482431852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118133899467124,0.09611435537279923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07213029041798852,0.0,0.05718268559972465,0.0,0.07982118539209286,0.0,0.09844260885306064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923330095337864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800630806947447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599513085219533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836207944085101,0.0,0.08308342827027937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16970406976246227,0.07903479734455726,0.0,0.08430592709236323,0.0,0.08843104928158277,0.0,0.09486129994112977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247354613139396,0.0,0.09801853013483187,0.0,0.10662313917955843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997103777687738,0.0,0.0,0.3143777262789279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310560054126992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191945735003724,0.0,0.0,0.13748522214028894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877261354552997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06261559685958824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09453342355782107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234823465762975,0.0905974983196512,0.0,0.0,0.09190902874467022,0.09000847192737378,0.0,0.0,0.09989931291771176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601304319823709,0.08190694826030821,0.0,0.0,0.08867608928943814,0.0,0.17967860862384682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060093914719623664,0.0964472108759864,0.09262116656450596,0.0,0.2125256626708333,0.0,0.08923008023661756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990019079039472,0.08539659114340059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21088160479279172,0.0,0.0,0.07948071137977318,0.0,0.09277558944800014,0.0,0.1327913892641397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22619082899876825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492796185007729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06368746895975058,0.0,0.0,0.09765436148301716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739898731381155,0.16598594026056698,0.1489161590847878,0.0,0.0,0.16868400443825204,0.08695821777682686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663641354244318,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Had_smith,2020/01/06,"My husband thinks mental illness isn’t “real” I’ve struggled with anxiety and depression for a while, mostly anxiety. I wanted to see a counselor a while back and my husband told me not to because it would look bad on him. He often says that anxiety and depression aren’t “real” and that it’s just weak mindedness. Long story short, we moved to a new country together because he’s in the military. I feel like I am literally going crazy and that I’m completely alone in this. I haven’t made new friends here and I keep backing out of social events. I’m not sure where I’m going with this post. I think I just want to say (write) it to someone.",2.981543340380547,4.831011720930231,4.534023960535587,83.44344608879494,75.2015503875969,7.79168428470754,28.006342494714588,8.575989854853784,2.1876604651162794,508,21,99,10,11,170,82,129,0.233,0.706,0.061,-0.9668,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,0,7,8,0,1,5,0,5,2,0,1,1,28,20,8,0,3,4,2,1,1,1,1,2,2,0,0,8,10,0,1,3,0,0,3,5,5,0,0,2,5,12,3,13,17,1,18,0,2,2,0,12,6,0,2,9,61,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551586847066967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3446057613930205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23092070357618874,0.1253736148404905,0.18306686295791355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743524060096462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25865751572738177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759231593191207,0.10727115714024707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116009807851468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17067372233056466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334651548300654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335841859683419,0.0,0.0,0.1328829393776551,0.12609284696525044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14208081495672414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15132148056618522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595915897233922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29004233773331645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380751304538564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418197853337581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23881944526236185,0.0,0.0,0.11965453511917197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15306467685519745,0.12722631287212996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697518637055002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415198317828734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924272308275417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14348006576607042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17713127123435865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666619675204657,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cameron0i0i,2020/01/06,"I want to help someone I'm currently a college student who is in need of advice. I have a friend diagnosed with ADHD, BPD and CPTSD and I don't know how to help. Does anyone have any advice from personal experiences or just in general?",5.143120567375885,5.704947000000002,6.8391489361702105,73.93333333333334,68.36170212765957,10.521985815602838,32.687943262411345,10.504223727775694,3.5755304964539008,187,8,35,5,3,65,37,47,0.0,0.784,0.21600000000000005,0.836,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,1,0,10,8,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,7,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,22,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040019421706685,0.4943680776065974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17201761517107206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768715455186019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185871172472329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567433152247985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22136203443360547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474378679760734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19543188401200945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.339099903993733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13901708169100782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187562426812336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208699596838443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21432737870177496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14919901470354394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,real2me-or-real2you,2020/01/06,"Schizo in love~~ UGH I’m starting to realize that being with him isn’t right anymore. He is aware of my state, and I’m torn between my feelings and his. I hate myself more than I have in so long. I’m so high maintenance and I’m sure he feels unappreciated. I cry almost every night with my consistent episodes. And even tho he’s there for me the way thinks he should be, I’m starting to feel even more lonely. The voices remind me how shitty I am. I’m so lazy. My mom reminded me today that her biggest regret is having a child with my dad. I’m an only kid. I have no ambition, no motivation, I’m always so tired from focusing on trying not focus on the hallucinations. I’m scared to sleep bc I’m my night terrors. He’s cheated on me, lied to me, and talked to so many girls while I needed space  to stop having hallucinations about him and his assistant, he’s treated me like a queen, has done so much to make up for shit, and I’m still hurting. I still feel the heart ache. I want to talk to him about it and about my worsening mental health, but I can’t. I can’t bring myself to remind him of his mistakes, to remind him I’m not getting even a little close to better. I feel so fucking alone. And I don’t have friends who understand enough to talk to them about it. I’m just alone. As I am when I hear the voices, as I am when I can feel them hurting me, as I am when I see him fucking his assistant mocking me when I walk into his living room. I will always be alone. From birth to now. It’s getting unbearable. But the progress I am happy about is I don’t want to kill myself anymore, I just wish i was killed accidentally.",0.9460651629072672,3.0057924035087744,3.091617376775272,90.3012105263158,82.56725146198829,5.779916457811196,20.59014202172097,6.9916214562510826,0.39960157059315016,1270,37,279,16,35,431,161,342,0.218,0.705,0.077,-0.9921,0,5,0,0,0,1,40.0,0,0,2,4,27,23,8,2,10,0,27,8,3,3,1,42,64,28,2,7,6,2,6,1,1,2,2,3,1,3,6,14,0,1,10,0,0,2,9,16,0,0,2,10,56,7,42,57,4,34,0,4,1,3,32,14,3,1,17,183,62,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356332342879684,0.32134551002190825,0.0,0.0,0.17211265539371948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051359050549556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146935228070198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136054499258596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583776786764744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686373815108836,0.0,0.20493000226136826,0.0,0.08713844609159688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137630467398743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799044522769594,0.1912260309220769,0.10806863167999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100958430890796,0.0,0.1021089273178782,0.0,0.10993394896805413,0.11656538201885686,0.12255690485203442,0.0,0.10927221324217552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22143319552179866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288447358319529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05052731632302048,0.10365714466345602,0.091324516979346,0.09152621390010836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334341108775736,0.0,0.06903574115152883,0.10485481906906728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104226187822503,0.0,0.0,0.12112791774419218,0.0,0.0,0.0760278992273334,0.07668693907313517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19411119943750246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865794940283098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832278636831224,0.0,0.0,0.10354459361520814,0.0,0.08241484291908217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616235484283326,0.0,0.0,0.10349781912273316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14640684487841416,0.0,0.16518768751761975,0.08646636613663225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747507434385287,0.0,0.0,0.2493827784892789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626936449258239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886967168205816,0.09803303256230562,0.0,0.0,0.07021751515937366,0.0,0.0,0.1076671238441938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200328119864105,0.08209246519609797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893149331589707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Scarey1313,2020/01/06,"Can anyone tell me what happens in CBT and would you recommend? I've read so much about it and like the sound of getting practical advice vs traditional talk therapy.

A colleague of mine said it changed her life and it's the first person I've spoke to with actual experience of it but I'm too afraid to ask her more about it. 

Can anyone tell me  what their experience was like and whether you would recommend for GAD? I know everyone's experiences are different and personal but it helps to hear advice from real people rather than a marketed web page.",5.01254716981132,6.705944169811325,5.8303301886792465,76.86172169811323,69.56603773584905,10.205660377358493,29.287735849056602,10.411451182825502,3.233135849056603,446,17,83,13,8,146,72,106,0.0,0.871,0.129,0.9146,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,1,1,5,3,0,1,4,0,6,1,0,0,0,15,14,9,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,2,1,4,0,2,8,6,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,4,9,2,13,9,3,2,0,0,0,0,15,1,0,0,3,54,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.15648203632681987,0.0,0.0,0.3133914722852908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242460084550967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499090215981016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696329052223078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675354403029301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322478948999027,0.0,0.4705699331533064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639673732234467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377816656629998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418002078481973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807302237259358,0.0,0.10748167506980892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812617536890914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326252899330574,0.15668139245412266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178783872088718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116903421018648,0.2800292534421889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16039704932451296,0.1825175656689176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525330468535796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288861940802508,0.28031232529530226,0.0,0.18337837985012626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278212719762379,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hiding_behind_you,2020/01/06,"I’m not ok; world’s on fire, and I can’t help. First time poster here - let me know if I’m in the wrong place.

UK person. My life is ok, but I’m not. World is going insane and all I can do is watch.

“Don’t watch it burn”, is the usual reply. That doesn’t help, it just means it still happens.

How does anyone go about their life either denying the problem, ignoring it, or denying the magnitude - “it’s ok, it’s just a small mass-extinction event, these things happen.”

Wish I could successfully ignore it; ignorance looks blissful. Put the TV on, watch Celebrities Cook a Meal, or Cat’s Do The Funnies, or Let’s All Bash Our Brains Out...

I can’t do that. I’ve looked under the carpet and seen what’s beneath.

This isn’t the future I expected.",0.3978431372549025,2.6620971830065367,2.0700980392156865,95.36044117647059,86.97385620915033,4.968627450980391,17.65032679738562,6.42735559955562,-0.22249281045751654,571,14,127,6,18,186,93,153,0.195,0.675,0.13,-0.7763,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,1,0,1,2,6,9,0,0,10,3,16,5,1,1,2,26,29,9,0,5,10,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,13,4,2,3,2,2,0,3,7,5,0,1,1,7,9,4,7,25,3,19,0,0,6,0,5,10,0,4,6,74,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287451542001312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20554546838679424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14700959867968827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611298706846657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15661744973691585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20928605547366635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3256439613047996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24683150306011944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119081374159586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37656254337266776,0.26010722528887104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30923887057071625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20056715165997108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16077168848328194,0.19237244171600665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761836794652035,0.0,0.18509744835710865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470432315870891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232510800997225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736532950078427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20278873469698025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117357701103774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013128355382936,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JJ246_gnc,2020/01/06,I can never be myself... Someone has made me realise this... I feel sh*t...,-1.2659523809523812,0.11850050000000326,1.4014285714285712,93.32690476190477,115.42857142857143,1.866666666666667,18.952380952380953,3.1291,-0.5775904761904758,53,2,10,0,3,18,13,14,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221319687416887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6028301911154346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4913632699469917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5398044945545861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,random8002,2020/01/06,"im hearing things this is like the 4th time in tge past week and a half ive woken up in the middle of the night due to hearing fake noises. the upsetting part is how real they sound.

honestly, id say 3/4 times i was woken up i wasnt afraid of the noise. i keep hearing the google hangouts ping noise whenever someone sends you a message. its always when im sleeping and its always so crisp and clear it wakes me up. i sleep with earplugs in, and my phone on do not disturb mode. i use hangouts for work but dont sleep with my laptop on. i dont even think about work while im sleeping.

one of the times, however, i woke up to the sound of knocking on my door. i talked to my roommates and they heard nothing.

the noises have nothing to do withy dreams. like in the case of the door knock i was actually having a great dream. nothing stressful or about horror, i just randomly heard a knock in the middle of the dream and it was like a record scratching and my brain doin like a lil double take and bein like ""WAIT WAIT WAIT... WTF i definitely should NOT have heard that. then woke up due to the fear of danger.""

tl;dr: ive woke up multiple times in the middle of the night due to hearing a knock on my door and google hangouts notification noises. im positive these noises arent real. why am i hearing them? is it early signs of schizophrenia? i dont feel paranoid or sad and have a pretty good, successful life with great relationships with all my friends.",1.921427235534772,4.092478793220341,3.057241379310348,91.26186440677972,79.71186440677965,5.6960841613091775,22.375803623611922,6.8039241337230125,0.5353869082407954,1144,36,240,12,29,367,141,295,0.07200000000000001,0.71,0.218,0.9933,2,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,3,3,7,19,1,5,24,0,21,7,6,2,2,35,42,18,0,1,6,0,2,5,1,1,1,11,3,0,9,14,0,4,2,6,0,1,7,8,0,2,12,13,27,11,38,29,3,35,0,1,0,0,19,19,0,3,20,144,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0838744090470308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14303390125020995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594817635227533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30219686540907964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05676889871850657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096717192904164,0.043458699130029095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640444603152511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209044476018743,0.0,0.18951946994494046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4843572165782346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3713612584755634,0.0,0.0,0.07639595164530802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06070874273801556,0.20995315994784064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16131575024736208,0.0,0.2474128714073884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05824167184344557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307503866002002,0.08204861647316926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744164037238628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19565891805255511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922777022681997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835056991262224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3440466781747952,0.0,0.07282481527530929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845497385455686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646234009651942,0.06908303097631123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710109363036683,0.05507303175970922,0.0,0.0,0.2004716065970588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423285638161796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894358293295774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755614338457358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12514466166570856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fingersinthepie,2020/01/06,"Really in need of advice to help my suicidal friend. My best friend is going through the roughest time of his life. Him and his girlfriend broke up a little while ago, and now he’s found out that he’s been completely removed from her life and replaced by someone new, even though he still thinks about her every day. 
I’d never see him even put on a frown before. Now i’ve had to drop everything and run to his side after receiving a suicide note, and stayed up for hours while he cried into me and now his problems are killing me too. He’s been better since but he’s slipping back into the same patterns and i’m worried i’m gonna receive another text but I don’t want the thought to even enter his mind again.
 I’m so awful at having serious and deep conversations. I don’t know how to offer genuine good advice or reply with anything than “mhm”, or “i hear ya”, or “shit dude”. But, he’s the type who hates empty confirmation like “oh its gonna be ok im here for you blah blah”. I hate seeing him this way and want, if not need, to help get him out of this state. 

What should I do? If i ask him how he feels, what he wants, anything, he’ll just reply with “i dont know”. How can I still be helpful and cheer him up?
He does talk to me about his thoughts but i’m pretty much silent for the most of it, except for giving out bad advice that he can normally shut down quickly. What are some things I should say or try?",2.064644067796614,3.6565309220339017,3.251999999999999,92.76444067796608,77.0677966101695,6.07593220338983,21.630508474576274,6.742157984588678,0.3020616949152544,1102,29,246,10,25,356,173,295,0.152,0.7170000000000001,0.131,-0.7808,0,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,2,0,2,21,16,4,0,8,2,17,3,1,3,1,54,45,27,3,11,13,0,1,3,3,5,2,2,0,0,11,17,0,0,7,0,0,7,5,8,0,0,6,5,30,8,37,32,5,44,0,1,2,0,44,16,1,8,18,151,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167713839223557,0.09578456974430508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330548161190165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17784073248322185,0.0,0.10101718868905712,0.0,0.0,0.08308791307674514,0.09022172417335513,0.0,0.0,0.09194716498586253,0.0,0.11339744897784675,0.09556619765680124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329400425071495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11869375492227124,0.06968677730949889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455998633633672,0.0,0.1266400940779594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21410866715025945,0.0,0.09104131334767288,0.0,0.09711320308725342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05463604401272447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847714075306487,0.1669666284839191,0.0,0.05645447331875825,0.10365656126601633,0.061410359425861163,0.09063172141967993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133646229534536,0.0,0.0,0.1217862602084354,0.0,0.21728171931342208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641277771627132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671834678014928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954726207156564,0.0,0.11876881578951975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15264541307447851,0.05279039785889295,0.10829987234464597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091051250499809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943313321705474,0.16024338195088542,0.08333896616323558,0.10436055396050987,0.0,0.0,0.10587132461344922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993116240401657,0.0,0.10339440013279086,0.0,0.10862549639720327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922303977609115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592997077219072,0.0,0.0,0.1722122868890351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091728905532174,0.08938452234223261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155496810191023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517265191772795,0.1725863232018244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363900830597558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685081690229647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178718938247552,0.0692375208501928,0.10616385675073817,0.1715677947905316,0.0630079577886525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07336250629715994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912015783717456,0.08576932665914977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973547786673632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Garvo909,2020/01/06,"How to cope with not mattering 
Been thinking alot today about what I am, and what my worth us to the world and people around me. So I'd like some tips on how to cope with being worthless (sorry for my harsh wording but its really the only thing to describe it recently.  I'm not trying to be overdramatic or anything). For a very long time I've struggled with having no worth or value to those around me, and I've constantly let myself and those around me down and have negatively affected many people with my irresponsibility, and inability to function properly (not showering, not brushing my teeth, sleeping for days at a time, being depressed, reaching out to people for ""help"" when all I wanted was the attention, etc.) And it seems like my worthlessness has only gotten worse with the depression epidemic. Ive started to think more about suicide and again I've begun reaching out to people for ""help"" instead of dealing with the issue directly (euthanasia or suicide), but if I'm not mistaken its currently (technically) illegal to kill yourself in the United states. It's been very hard coping lately and I've been having strange episodes where I feel as if express myself to the point where I dont even feel like I cant speak, or even move. Its terrifying and I've never had anything like this happen before. Because of this, I've been having panic attacks alot as well (these are normal, but have been coming up more frequently recently). So with these symptoms on the table, are there any coping mechanisms I can use to decrease the panic attacks? I know there isn't alot of information (I'm very bad at structuring paragraphs) but if anyone could help it would be appreciated",8.17754113864195,8.124260118971064,8.201297522224326,68.84717798373372,61.95819935691318,10.918933232456972,35.9790051068659,10.46071229359064,3.8749018725174964,1351,55,223,28,17,439,169,311,0.21,0.68,0.111,-0.9922,2,0,0,1,0,2,39.0,1,0,0,0,19,16,3,3,14,0,28,3,2,4,2,63,43,28,3,7,16,0,3,4,0,1,1,1,1,0,16,23,0,0,8,0,2,2,11,11,1,0,8,5,19,5,44,28,8,35,0,4,0,0,8,16,0,12,20,168,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918738173904378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113968605133933,0.0,0.16744837941016374,0.2717132316613982,0.0,0.23149019374822835,0.0,0.0,0.08494950110399713,0.06202038083026579,0.0,0.08657411355238423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764087906607781,0.0,0.10994589733349096,0.0,0.08123192489520319,0.0,0.0,0.06561454040284867,0.1048905231116434,0.1752587810903898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923971649017807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346813016096816,0.13439796695755488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102886632320593,0.07268380427178578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899692470589092,0.0,0.0911399690128612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045845811949698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061911906446626,0.0,0.0,0.11256136329001216,0.0,0.05591420326132435,0.0,0.11476830091049416,0.0,0.0,0.1040370850485887,0.0,0.1988220909003143,0.0,0.0,0.09003760017389902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10314942433815699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813460188289584,0.0,0.0,0.0784689459545992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996845969142754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15475725908558505,0.0,0.23874232883809055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821376486235876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961781485180208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517790197161571,0.0,0.2009139641843545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262120253312674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018144951042505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389074106259292,0.07201281687600268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636180335751597,0.0,0.2225763230070172,0.0,0.0,0.10574787463684687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759221218142539,0.13038307365086907,0.0,0.0,0.11865201266699965,0.0,0.09643858970625732,0.0,0.0,0.06907547341600341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238191876416292,0.08787157408682658,0.0,0.25184098746330746,0.0600094889998176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147739464762926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368279029572793,0.0722739007747007,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,disastrousbee69,2020/01/06,"Strange Reactions to Stress Hey! I'm here because I'd like to get some answers on unexplained experiences I had in my childhood, as well as some current oddities.

I figured that before I start, I'd list my diagnoses to maybe give you guys some clues on what's going on. I have: Autism, OCD, ADHD, Sensory Processing Disorder and supposedly Bipolar Type 2. I'm very unsure about the last one though, as the last time I was deeply depressed was nearly 5 years ago. I've only ever had some moments of very mild depression since, and they generally only last an hour or two. I am, however, an extremely high energy person. More on that later.

So from ages 8-10, I would get these days where, out of nowhere, I would be hit by this feeling of my face drooping. Like, it felt like the muscles in my face just stopped holding it up. It was always accompanied by this very strong feeling of discomfort. It's hard to explain, but I wanted to jump out of my body. I would experience sadness, terror and/or boredom. I'd almost get this sense of impending doom...or something like that. Everything, at least within my memories, looked visually bleak. I would often smell and/or taste a mix of rusted metal and chemicals. I have not had any of this since. Though, occasionally (almost never), I have moments where I suddenly feel very separate from everything as well as lose my appreciation for it all. I usually get out of that place within minutes though, as I realize how pointless it is to get like that. But as a kid, it was horrible.

Now, onto the other random stuff:

People often tell me that my pupils are massive. I've heard it since I was a kid. I've been accused of drug use by multiple doctors. These people seem to be right about my pupils being way too big. They tend to get bigger at night, generally hovering around 6-8mm (with the lights on). In normal day lighting they are around 5 or 6mm (sometimes as low as 4). Only in the sun do they seem to react normally. They are always 8mm for the first hour after waking up. The pattern seems to be that they start big, get relatively smaller and then get big again.

So, about that energy I mentioned earlier: Since early childhood, I've always felt very excited by things. I tend to get pretty passionate and rambley. I pace, smile, move my hands a lot and raise my voice in an excited tone, all while rambling on and on about something. Most of the time though, I can keep focus on the topic, make sense and not get random with it. But here and there I end up getting so energized by it that I'm not really thinking anymore and just popping off about bullshit. As soon as I finish THOSE kinds of rants, I feel burnt out and irritated. There tends to be a correlation with the energy being too high and getting irritated. Say, I'll be in the car, and out of nowhere I feel this wired feeling that's so strong that the car feels way faster than it normally would and I get anxious. It kinda reminds me of an autism overload to be honest. It becomes hard to think straight and everything becomes too intense for me. I always feel immersed in things, but sometimes the immersion just becomes overwhelming. The energy does seem to resemble hypomania, but I don't get the high self-esteem or grandiosity. I do tend to dream about things I feel I have the potential to achieve, but it never gets that unrealistic. And I actually have plans set in place to achieve these dreams. Another oddity to it is it changes over the course of hours rather than days, weeks or months. Though, some weeks do tend to be higher energy than others.

Side note: My dad has had a few seizures, though it is believed they were drug-induced. Can't prove this though. I don't think this has any relation to this, but I figured I should mention it. While I'm at it, I've started to think recently that he has Schizotypal Personality Disorder. I'm just throwing this stuff out there because I'm clueless. Thank you for reading through and giving me suggestions! Much love <3 :)",4.998650680028632,6.408683539370083,5.655005010737297,79.19547100930569,69.249343832021,9.05887854927225,30.3899785254116,9.434330858725014,2.7641965354330704,3155,126,588,67,55,1023,339,762,0.08900000000000001,0.785,0.127,0.9857,2,0,4,0,0,0,116.0,0,2,7,7,43,26,0,4,28,0,48,12,5,4,6,110,109,54,0,11,19,1,14,5,0,6,4,3,0,5,53,28,1,3,25,3,0,6,8,9,2,3,14,22,60,17,109,79,13,106,0,6,1,2,27,51,0,22,51,385,113,5,0.0,0.0,0.04951534674307405,0.0,0.06098014445348216,0.0,0.04497833555899269,0.0,0.1016184356638466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16888043199082256,0.0,0.0,0.06901047372774033,0.05320577193401645,0.0,0.0573222506871306,0.05032087876289517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033949237435758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06186179841310844,0.16811647731241694,0.0431763743520712,0.05716709646122298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636118646983933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053676653999919784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817015190083253,0.0,0.08740532741658055,0.05150047508934863,0.0,0.0,0.1163058726187254,0.05193498693479477,0.04440329801807552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768559490854875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04494096628395088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045897629865691736,0.0,0.0,0.1368066980097321,0.09926776667743564,0.0,0.0,0.2309030040018205,0.0,0.09743755263239633,0.0,0.0,0.043159789466405016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976467584782797,0.09734970064510556,0.028836959443762158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05024100965178264,0.0,0.0,0.09090692954434744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16083017139022027,0.0,0.0,0.14990732755799185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045100431448207697,0.0,0.052838356588766636,0.0,0.1240806842383032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239460716652219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04260918745350722,0.056765569674374385,0.0,0.04313770471733745,0.0457952250865471,0.0,0.0338696354483827,0.0,0.050975588560880254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04050053241638967,0.05392905407553567,0.037300059183606425,0.0,0.07826830553680936,0.0,0.0,0.04761646251443862,0.14914456401225992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03438303302509682,0.11577116549862165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035405986810514,0.08860918420971274,0.10602591342852262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05162126555662644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05075416770064098,0.0,0.032505622980549466,0.0,0.05010005978827268,0.0,0.0,0.04333205563063435,0.0,0.0403508317705402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18476875127757644,0.05293334147048678,0.0,0.0,0.1678920540300595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812493412377862,0.10036717848937708,0.0,0.10774302659318932,0.0,0.0,0.04242127701890056,0.05812299871174175,0.0,0.11617132076874315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04434937807930151,0.046714976845089407,0.0,0.0,0.10112907438540483,0.13004969190281845,0.3489655494765957,0.0,0.05917431327133681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04956603370186634,0.0,0.0,0.04382344585466562,0.05588342237970527,0.209330870890786,0.029928024156607357,0.08055079362870891,0.08140183527781608,0.0,0.09124349240187912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18022275179547526,0.0,0.0,0.032675177591353445
mentalhealth,bruhotheraccountdown,2020/01/06,"please fucking help please please please I don't know what to fucking do. All I want to do is kill someone. I can't stop these feelings, they are so overwhelming and so pleasurable. I can't put this into words this is too fucking frustrating..

what should I do? I'm a minor who can't drive so even if I wanted to be hospitalized I couldn't 

shit shit shit i don't know what to do I feel once I go back to my school,, I'm gonna

do something and I don't want to have to go to jail for a long time and miss out but I want to so fucking bad so maybe I should just kill myself?? but the only method I have rn is really painful i need to fucking die or something so I don't have to explain myself after id killed someone

fuck fuck fuck i can't do this 

I really want to so bad but I know I shouldn't and I don't want to fuck up my life for the 2 years I plan to continue living give or take, likely take 

what should I do? Just skip school forever? I can't go back.

I'll see all of them and they will be so intense i can't function like this",-0.8111174968071495,1.1325737758620704,1.5447318007662858,99.29196679438057,89.25862068965517,4.816347381864624,17.213282247765008,6.238725200709706,-0.500128863346105,804,20,202,8,27,271,98,232,0.247,0.636,0.11699999999999999,-0.9939,0,0,3,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,3,1,14,24,16,1,4,0,33,14,3,0,2,37,66,19,4,13,8,0,2,2,0,6,2,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,6,0,0,5,13,21,0,0,0,3,32,3,21,57,2,16,0,2,1,9,7,3,12,3,10,127,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158850982642355,0.1320279278897806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205449069744711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052220097997639235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995284666955188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6578288514004184,0.0,0.07584404488788266,0.1347992833253387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05299399051267548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262413140086055,0.0,0.13035220278391918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055844248640658525,0.07725198011506319,0.0,0.0698137194206364,0.06996790816096443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942900289117674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05862391200919372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419908279836151,0.0,0.06013066579978513,0.08412817485520724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3471479467546133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947974468856933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129904507597824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003113313056286,0.06300265153277386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243469851224326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13397895947193636,0.12173249576077967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609986917478126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188904631769102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04610203464643672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797989999966357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091371867680716
mentalhealth,JarooDy,2020/01/06,"OCD fear of paranoia I have extreme fear of developing paranoia/psychosis but mostly paranoia.
It all started when one of my co-workers developed an episode of psychosis and went on rants about conspiracies and how people are out to get and kill him. 
It made me question certain things and people and motives and drove up my anxiety cause I couldn't understand what was happening until later.
Now I keep getting ideas that maybe I'm going to develop paranoia and I have paranoid thoughts which I don't believe (I think I don't) like thinking everyone is out to get me or that symbols have hidden meanings Or that I mistrust friends and family. I also fear that thinking these thoughts too often will cause me to believe them.
The anxiety generated by these thoughts lead me to search symptoms of Paranoia and Psycosis. I struggle to eat and sleep, I start experiencing derealization which further feeds my fear of developing a worst mental illness. I don't feel like talking to anybody and just want to lie in my room.
I recently lost my Dad and then got retrenched and am starting my own business but I have no motivation what so ever.
I am at the point where I don't know if I believe my paranoid thoughts or not, no matter how unrealistic.
I also can't afford a mental health practitioner so I'm stuck in a pile of shit",6.553177710843372,7.51760719678715,6.923551706827311,73.14267695783134,65.3855421686747,9.277208835341368,38.45406626506024,9.354420925462401,3.782471686746988,1068,57,182,19,16,347,142,249,0.272,0.687,0.040999999999999995,-0.996,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,4,14,13,2,5,6,0,16,7,2,8,3,53,45,28,1,3,8,1,1,2,1,1,3,0,1,0,13,15,2,1,15,0,0,4,9,9,0,1,11,2,31,4,25,32,4,25,0,1,0,0,6,11,1,7,12,132,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16324995446869026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15616584313484835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449922689120504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097070754958212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444262491274496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923277458843309,0.0,0.0975318231164766,0.0,0.0,0.0962220818602984,0.4594264548189033,0.05160942815031549,0.07291850242639376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078858676281855,0.0,0.15998137148233849,0.0,0.05800847388833466,0.0,0.08163433834132422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025976041972944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084951519848856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115224090909737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072410026854986,0.11292482726261245,0.0,0.05609475187808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973204665735262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11142096428983872,0.0,0.0,0.0965806702040208,0.0,0.0,0.10254257574357266,0.11118365582067198,0.0,0.0,0.2057241861091284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916496440367667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415243397195302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964887106053654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11434124867629487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078136065973764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477291984747693,0.0,0.0,0.10214325712149384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21673604517736825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067052487676577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608933765298427,0.0,0.0820396329146994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781046943452036,0.1962061266803169,0.0,0.3241272657327767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625799468593464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020326141539674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461948961732064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430784346889402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mrdlau,2020/01/06,"How do I stop letting other peoples comments/judgment affect me I’m a 36 y/o male,  not a talker,  shy,  stereotypical ‘nice’ guy who is unable to talk back.

One of my biggest sensitive points is my intelligence.  I’m not being humble,  but I’m just not ‘smart.’  I have a job, went to college, decent grades, happy salary,  but I’m not quick witted or street smart.  I can’t make quick decisions on my feet,  I don’t think 3 steps ahead of what I’m doing and I can’t decide on the whim.  I really hate that about myself,  I don’t know ‘how to get smarter’, and I hate it more when people directly or indirectly point it out.

My wife is the opposite.  Super smart, fast, decisive,  and just has better common sense.  We work well in the sense that she tells me what she wants and I do it.  I’m much of a follower than a leader.

The problem comes in when her family members takes notice of this and makes jokes or comments relating to it.  Like saying,  “oh you learned so much after marrying my daughter”,  or  “your smart now”,  or just flat out accusing me on the assumption that I do not know something(like it’s something literally retarded like I don’t know how to drink hot liquids).

The more these types of things happen,  the more I get riled up inside my mind.  I don’t expect this assumption to go away and that’s not what I’m asking ,  but I’m more asking on how to deal with these comments to not let it affect me as much.  

Like it literally drains my mind where first I feel mad,  then I feel bad,  then I pretend to have a conversation with that person as if I was going to talk back.

It’s really tiring and I want to learn to just let go",3.7194394971189126,4.535413542168675,5.1449869041382925,83.8855028810896,71.71084337349399,8.424515453116816,24.976951283394452,8.716276077567194,1.558254688318491,1264,35,267,22,23,425,170,332,0.098,0.765,0.13699999999999998,0.8894,3,0,3,0,0,0,40.0,1,2,0,5,19,17,3,0,13,0,21,3,1,8,0,60,53,27,0,5,20,2,3,3,0,0,1,1,0,3,23,13,1,1,11,3,0,7,13,5,1,2,2,4,36,12,35,47,7,37,0,0,0,0,23,15,0,7,18,180,59,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194774821563593,0.0,0.11028668152841113,0.18052300005935432,0.09801122519022633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381712614045364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111642590459627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101835263788495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499220437230533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11065973963364716,0.0,0.11870634622200475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984726790528807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12265720142543075,0.0,0.20013709409285568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11622919417710376,0.10380280071204497,0.12495807332758395,0.0,0.23178595066236365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648608772250404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19353449388014898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3601010731663555,0.0,0.17204453649615464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567102437838094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370499362245521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588735289189213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336431278685984,0.0,0.0,0.0795428326295579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275938207120472,0.1024956917542762,0.0,0.0,0.22193274946343908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232119456453607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15039914171469904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334893334293007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036838830749808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813876906622944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825859911344111,0.18869856570264967,0.10259930109167356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798510224455604,0.07521530218844276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349163123121203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847293894548332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554283909975933,0.10881668617940678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545737581259315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zeesworld,2020/01/06,"I don’t know how to be better My mental health has been declining for years and I don’t know what to do about it. I was raised in a South Asian family which ever since my childhood, never fostered healthy communication. I constantly feel alone, anxious and unhappy. Its so difficult for me to reach out to people for help and I’ve honestly never confided in anyone for my mental health and I don’t know what to do. My parents were very authoritative throughout my childhood and established very early on that they have very high expectations of me. I always excelled in school, they enrolled me in arts and dance classes, and I always kept busy with extracurriculars. Outside of home I have always been seen as a social butterfly because of my proactive and upbeat nature. Even though i have made great friends I always feel a barrier between others and myself. Whenever i struggled in school or struggled emotionally I constantly was treated like a failure by my family and compared to those around me. When I immigrated from my home country this continued to worsen. My parents make it so clear that they expect me to succeed and my current state has me feeling like I am constantly disappointing them, and wasting their resources. They work so hard to make ends meet, and work even harder for me to be able to attend university outside of my home city. Especially this year, i have been doing so poorly in school. I constantly feel incompetent because now more than ever, there are so many people around me that are smarter, more successful, have healthier support systems. I constantly feel trapped in my own body because I dont have the means to communicate my emotions to others. When I do feel good about myself, I feel like I don’t deserve to. I can barely get out of bed most days and I can never sleep at night because of how anxious i constantly am of disappointing everybody. Ever since university started my anxiousness has been through the roof. I don’t have many strengths or skills or special interests. I’m constantly fatigued and overworked but have nothing to show for it. I have no confidence, no sense of good self esteem and my friends don’t understand why i constantly put myself down. My parents are seeing more of the damage this is doing to me and now are trying to be more supportive but it doesn’t get through to me because I know they are still so ashamed of me for not being what they need me to be, and in the end I just feel pitied. Mental health has never been a conversation in my home and the one time I tried to get help my mother begged me not to do it because she fears that I will be seen as a crazy person. I’ve gone twenty years with this crippling depressiveness and I just want everything to stop. It feels like nothing will get better and my issues are so deep rooted in early traumatic experiences that I don’t even know where to start. I’m so tired of walking around with such a heavy heart. I’m making this post because it’s getting to a point where I just cant handle it anymore and i legitimately have no emotional outlet and I guess I’m just looking for a small way to start finding help around me",6.6178460003627775,7.32217195637584,6.788470886994379,75.08292127698172,65.1744966442953,9.664719753310358,33.72555777253764,9.635858565294015,3.203661581715945,2530,105,448,48,37,813,256,596,0.121,0.762,0.11800000000000001,-0.6229,5,2,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,8,10,36,32,0,4,14,0,57,8,3,7,8,84,100,43,0,4,11,4,10,4,2,2,5,0,5,2,26,32,0,3,17,3,1,5,19,11,0,1,13,14,81,21,76,79,6,73,0,6,4,0,23,26,0,5,42,328,107,9,0.052714035229626616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05459584277666831,0.0,0.0,0.1754492005774676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786555660676802,0.05227815826398055,0.036858879094922976,0.0,0.0,0.18770666951534806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22493790621396276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932425607999395,0.0,0.058553409611530736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4557211606330009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033996191799781014,0.0,0.04540252130064491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06178045669547375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778885835544827,0.09337797771770967,0.0,0.0,0.10445136933378492,0.14304858840200727,0.0,0.0,0.047375975843775085,0.051564441484887716,0.09938820197099643,0.05931794500748608,0.23988420082473935,0.11297675190242255,0.0,0.0,0.04817967320460993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145346571118271,0.0,0.13770453857955325,0.0,0.0,0.08842806350029837,0.0,0.0581174099375556,0.05807045283831465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047221421474024514,0.0,0.0,0.16809766328902714,0.0,0.062466385555291486,0.10599931995073623,0.055695272421466144,0.21150590150013412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055019757243416234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448512758554198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301365969770823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04426651322386218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987929470632246,0.10556108354090302,0.10688751585570024,0.0,0.05742103801403053,0.0,0.0,0.15937004711417424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03908678918565305,0.16262525474511372,0.0,0.0,0.04946855111632592,0.0,0.10116107701643763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035720394521549584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17559809351106062,0.0,0.0,0.07309054942439469,0.04602786228738598,0.0,0.0,0.04983180197394944,0.0,0.05048547424477333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05299216512000158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600482537612262,0.04200626116886398,0.0,0.05499223524840171,0.0,0.0,0.0872111893475133,0.0,0.05275210467544008,0.05373532048161359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193379635954014,0.0,0.042097496627875056,0.044071293830216296,0.0,0.11021631013224988,0.0,0.0,0.1196385249780012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051791271969332565,0.0,0.03073797785743724,0.060587028948610885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157873936153257,0.0,0.0,0.054877169734342264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304837991744455,0.031092103751992093,0.04184194752890481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04756621765105813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675289093659532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183833117103737
mentalhealth,HyenaHugs,2020/01/06,"I think I need therapy but I can't So basically my parents have basically lead me to the point of wanting to do the no more live, especially my dad, and I'd imagine I need therapy for my suicidal thoughts. My parents actually know about me wanting to die (they went onto my Discord and saw me talking to my friends about it). They thought it was very disrespectful to not talk to them. I've gone to therapy only once before, to which my mom cancled after I got out since apparently I don't need it. Also considering I've already run away (the reason of the first and only therapy session), my parents would have to be everything from therapy. So basically I can't go to therapy because my parents think I don't need it and I can't go to a counselor because my parents would be told and get offended that I told someone why they make me want to kill myself. Every night I always think about what has already happened. I can't try to speak up because my dad always yells and talks over me when I talk to him about it and I can't raise at all. Also one time, my dad told my uncle that my sexuality is hurting my mental health and that an argument we had once where he tried to gaslight me fixed my mental health in the same conversation. I hate how he thinks I'm his trophy and always acts so selfish.
My mom basically is not as bad, but still terrible. For starters, she was the first person I came out to, and I made it very clear to her that I didn't want him telling my dad. She literally promised she wouldn't. Soon enough, I come to find out that she literally told him about it when he woke up (I came out to her through a text at 12AM). She also always defends my dad, even though he is clearly in the wrong. The reasons my parents stalked my Discord was because apparently my friends who literally discouraged me from running away, begged my brother to find me, and helped my family find me are apparently a bad influence. When they were interrogating me on why I ran away; actually only when my brother and mom were interrogating me, their immediate first thoughts were: my sexuality, school, online friends. Nope, not them not giving a shit about me at all. Also, incase you were wondering, they only sent me to therapy because a police officer suggested it because I wouldn't tell him anything.
I honestly just wish I could live with my uncle because, despite him being a politician, he's shown me more love in the few times he's visited me than my mom or my dad. He always reassures me that he'll be there for me and that he loves me. All my dad does is complain about things that are his fault and make me and be selfish.

Also, on some side problems that I always feel annoying and just a pain to exist. That and the feeling that I'm barely ever my own person. In the majority of classes I'm in, there's a more popular kid of the same name (I don't think Joshua is very common) and I just feel like I'm just an extra copy that should just be thrown away. I don't matter.

Alright I'm just gonna try to sleep now because I have to be awake im about three and a half hours for school.",5.484507410636443,5.573562258064517,6.532554489973844,78.07302092414997,67.54838709677419,9.605928509154316,32.88578901482127,9.429241890294046,2.8281974716652143,2440,100,492,45,37,819,251,620,0.129,0.7659999999999999,0.105,-0.9638,9,0,0,0,0,1,59.0,1,1,8,4,36,28,5,0,23,1,43,7,2,8,6,94,97,37,3,16,13,19,3,1,3,7,3,2,0,3,24,28,0,1,19,0,0,14,18,17,0,6,26,6,104,11,69,56,14,57,0,2,1,2,81,25,1,3,19,338,128,5,0.0,0.0,0.09741195861702442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015615661097593,0.19956921976045625,0.24917992199988415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041072536615931285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18757227569532006,0.0,0.08334727411251942,0.2434024739142243,0.0,0.04247062242581804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416987604366055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04299394508532817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039849907432884975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05179978386112854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04367749105585321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051571450641229116,0.0,0.03296577392038851,0.04514739686965482,0.04205220731856296,0.0,0.044856828174252995,0.0,0.04705169042915585,0.0,0.0757095707016604,0.035656459893536635,0.0,0.0,0.13685337033842754,0.12736292589960518,0.0,0.0,0.11568344663714228,0.0,0.02607646055142707,0.04787922146555085,0.056731193150121435,0.0,0.03991842144510678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04413617148343118,0.0,0.0,0.04927682295520725,0.0,0.10610621191232704,0.0,0.0,0.03345432079539666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04915232464606335,0.0,0.05343080501749122,0.0,0.05391249243005592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05521917538471623,0.0,0.0274298045629455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024384015053846242,0.0,0.0881447327450891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900933319549464,0.047227036746904684,0.06663201903424112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059718654446016,0.0,0.0,0.23382084659578603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480336271840162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04683813384175065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10630726613957492,0.033821015205119216,0.15183839253061285,0.05310886993618919,0.0,0.33252184754256703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716079713742664,0.0,0.0,0.04718206937055748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477581285911196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263373206038708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102528255010604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05123296955037378,0.041286931464311616,0.0,0.049947089281272096,0.0,0.04228946571720739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03985902430864452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054594581379329724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604664266744249,0.08724890496209584,0.0,0.39954340120985177,0.0,0.03315867994127489,0.15990490876909436,0.04903734743776492,0.1188713817456894,0.058207062403178876,0.0,0.0,0.1907685661979466,0.0,0.10165896813580208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354551552442372,0.11775530789514373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0462680379385536,0.09007390830781108,0.0,0.05739523755529406,0.0,0.05412639828783418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091074745307209,0.054569891580562524,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Slartibartfast02,2020/01/06,"I think I have OCD? Please help. As said in the title, I think I have OCD, but I am missing some common symptoms. For example, my room is messy and unorganised and I don't worry about stuff for too long. However I do some things that I have learnt that other people don't. For example, when shopping, I like to touch everything and if I miss something, I go back and reach out to tap it.

I like counting things, like mnms in a bag, or spots on a dog. I also find the middle letter of a phrase, such as 'no right turn' I would find h and chant 'no righ, t turn' in my head a few times.

I also find tapping on desks/seats/my legs to a drum beat very satisfying but I have never played drums before. Similarly, I over exercise my face muscles a lot, like cringing really hard and closing my eyes/squinting with much force, while making that yawning feeling in my head.

I have a bunch of other similar things, you might call them superstitions. I don't know if it matters but I have a tested IQ of 138 which is around top .4 percent.


Any help is appreciated and I do worry I might have OCD. Thanks in advance!",2.475820155770592,4.195762968609866,4.015171111635592,87.18040122728348,76.26457399103141,6.847203209818268,23.396034930375265,7.669130373188453,1.0013910313901344,854,26,180,12,19,284,131,223,0.08,0.718,0.20199999999999999,0.9786,1,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,1,3,8,8,0,0,10,0,19,7,4,1,1,33,31,19,0,3,6,0,3,4,0,3,3,1,1,0,12,11,0,0,7,5,1,2,6,2,0,0,1,4,29,6,23,27,7,24,0,2,0,0,7,15,0,8,11,122,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21155521684233666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994927284346922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774983142675025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170875123187748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255345072135288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350641661135021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887724999193328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688053175257087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3626817360951491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517303947850909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848943743244594,0.0,0.2714977919860255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731782733525514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726930518045583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584850308276542,0.0,0.0,0.11705626749628704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11245264557287224,0.0,0.0,0.0882923682591903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806386828410453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723489839586773,0.0,0.10201606784357604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917005229045132,0.0,0.0,0.14519457557102528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473662018201962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11295928528662028,0.12582065011238708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182919542186898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15141941887892646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374809132711976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177798444603966,0.0,0.0,0.26362626462144506,0.1695086932213523,0.0,0.0,0.07712867572489687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877471930409751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913798212486424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268656607353949,0.0,0.09396200082791603,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lucapuca72,2020/01/06,I just cut myself for the second time I am 14 and have been depressed for the past 6-7 months. Recently it has been getting much worse. I cut myself for the first time 2 days ago and just did it again a hour ago. I dont know what to do I told my friend that I talk to about depression because she is also depressed. But I want to keep cutting. It eases the pain and sadness slightly and I feel like I deserve pain. I have been very suicidal recently. I dont want to kill myself I just want life to end already. Idk what to do I hate being sad 24/7 and I just want to stop crying myself to sleep every night. I want this pain to stop and I dont want to get into cutting but it seems as if that is the only thing that helps.,-0.18897435897435955,1.8924365128205167,1.85923076923077,97.16910256410259,87.71794871794874,4.4923076923076914,17.641025641025642,5.82211442006289,-0.4908051282051282,560,14,130,4,18,186,84,156,0.23,0.6559999999999999,0.114,-0.9372,0,0,0,0,0,3,12.0,0,0,0,1,7,16,6,0,6,0,16,5,1,0,0,26,30,11,2,7,7,0,1,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,11,7,0,3,3,0,0,0,3,14,0,2,5,1,22,2,16,24,1,17,0,5,0,0,5,1,0,2,17,89,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20175335404350425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12558093476706755,0.09100567753742868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937131600077859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500376221092588,0.07339147157107777,0.0,0.2940468630353767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4001176359326756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079286582149134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588125923335752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05754060993676415,0.08129861646731819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679807152087648,0.0,0.0,0.08792146114945927,0.0,0.11891142146615097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123537654081447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762776227264387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206990267145857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011505116896862,0.12590264357840464,0.0,0.06254140673512652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038018062132404,0.05559684538832475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09083393320365543,0.0,0.08365596406345037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679342510768007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.086549893597247,0.3632731062629343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863480800951056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22472719309070127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359908506337552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388200812030418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902834957097618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447853617561368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146798726680287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756035459256828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327151841807796,0.0,0.0,0.10874060789864323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389677226199618,0.4027325052238399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115971742081555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dtom2701,2020/01/06,"I’m in 11th Grade and my marks are terrible due to personal reasons 
To start things off I easily get distracted from studying and I mostly procrastinate in my learning which is a really bad habit since I am currently in Grade 11. I know what I am doing is wrong because I really need to focus on my schooling so I am able to get into university or college. I have 4 cores next semester which will kill me. I have two cores this semester and my marks are very bad, My LA and Physics is below 60% because I don’t focus on them because they are many things going on in my personal life (I had my first date and it didn’t go well) I was depressed this whole semester and never stopped thinking about her which made me not study, also drama and stuff from friends. I talked to my counsellor and it never changed a bit, I told her my marks are terrible because of personal reasons back then, but what she said was “Well you can change that.” But I really can’t since I still feel depressed from unknown reasons like having heartbroken and dying friendships, so that didn’t really change anything.
(I actually studied physics and I finished every exact homework in physics and I enjoyed learning them but after my quiz I got 40% which made me led to believe that me studying won’t make a difference)

In short, If any of you have a solution for me to focus on school and learn while facing personal problems please share.",7.096593406593406,6.825214410256415,7.284556776556776,75.25210989010992,64.23809523809524,10.649963369963373,36.148717948717945,10.203070172399654,3.6467579487179496,1126,49,207,23,15,365,147,273,0.11199999999999999,0.79,0.098,-0.6199,1,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,2,3,1,8,16,1,1,4,0,25,2,1,7,3,39,41,22,2,3,6,0,1,1,1,2,1,1,1,4,16,13,0,1,9,1,0,3,8,10,2,2,10,2,43,6,28,29,3,32,0,2,0,0,17,14,0,3,16,149,59,11,0.10012690235623747,0.0,0.09770941322038078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007144763942965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808972710002463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239590927420032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699140744711028,0.16720356232790567,0.24414572132821746,0.0,0.0,0.11280873139639905,0.0,0.0,0.10931264473266142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.317762959018307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17247830856408014,0.0,0.1039159166465803,0.10461130203743248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843612336730182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05062717030811125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516789199436381,0.0,0.0,0.0773577963849088,0.0,0.10462434779128046,0.0,0.11380885206884007,0.0,0.08008063058088609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077558242240232,0.0,0.055027126990273366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072259223850284,0.04891694688606449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18948499195337806,0.06683548482092737,0.10151296345047696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424282939377706,0.15444807944972785,0.0,0.1064860965707997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497077962512175,0.0,0.1099092712426836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580792312138664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565754301810818,0.30884139520275244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524361297070934,0.0,0.0,0.2026675414094156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656520166238781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087033683808305,0.0,0.07996147356088372,0.0837105737557169,0.0,0.0,0.11462134804638376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804782113742918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330397296685973,0.0641572760827586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567554604551956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780943459410192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261518058140603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18005221995164386,0.0,0.0,0.11178811074291332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947304954208577,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,non-non-heinous,2020/01/06,"i cant stand this anymore. someone please help me my mom is an insufferable alcoholic cunt. she drinks every other night and acts like she deserves an award for not drinking every once in a while. she almost died once because of it and it really fucked me up mentally. since her near death, ive tried to get her to stop drinking. ive tried screaming until my voice is gone, crying and opening up to her, and even guilt tripping. it doesnt matter what i say, she tells me what she thinks i want to hear: “this is my last time i promise” and “its a holiday let me relax” and “well i didnt drink yesterday :/“. and then shes back to drinking within the next few days. i genuinely dont want to be alive anymore. my two older brothers are pretending like nothing is happening. its disgusting. my entire family disgusts me. ive ran out of ways to try and stop her from drinking. ive tried everything. its as if it takes me attempting suicide for anyone to make a change. even then, im sure she would be back to drinking in the next few days. only problem is im too much of a pussy to even attempt to take my own life. i dont know what to do anymore. i want to die.",1.6822568165069995,3.76376511440678,3.261739130434784,89.95326823876198,80.05932203389831,6.307737656595433,23.82019159911569,7.423996415210882,1.0463801031687543,901,32,189,13,23,297,131,236,0.175,0.6970000000000001,0.128,-0.9536,0,0,8,0,0,4,27.0,0,0,0,3,7,14,4,1,8,0,21,10,0,1,1,25,35,14,4,6,2,2,0,2,0,1,2,4,0,0,13,10,8,2,2,10,0,4,6,7,1,1,3,4,35,7,28,28,4,31,0,0,0,1,17,8,2,2,19,125,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140466578146167,0.08564510359468741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544658464659182,0.059803980477616474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153329621608512,0.0,0.05213778483237663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904785152892267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394977107422436,0.1103184709155984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17753153889582096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004790876358072,0.5865021394885406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16947361954255424,0.0,0.14412401988481846,0.0,0.07686809810934853,0.0,0.08062928439944866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790703343910274,0.0446854583704643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563315771191209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639758447326303,0.0,0.057328396093734586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18477234909853546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047004592033882985,0.06971768450128432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745936548980297,0.06041177829140688,0.08357045906936098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05709138145536434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619328115203691,0.0,0.0,0.1001707237653742,0.0,0.0,0.06287377702675055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18192247352749688,0.08026332698826501,0.0,0.08206754008180096,0.0,0.0,0.1821715376666744,0.0,0.0650487837017206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388533870606984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183985947022876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479217288461905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801622450775885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707506087167855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246858353681095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301242254589308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355502402895913,0.0,0.08061022535472068,0.0,0.12861457495153572,0.0,0.07475625963238644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05480363510179847,0.0,0.0,0.049872743633183066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23227475368230202,0.0,0.08354956585273259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15134195163696254,0.06788906973323426,0.0,0.0,0.07690099053434102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06075746451639025,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway8437975,2020/01/06,"Intrusive fear of being shot while outside I haven't shared this with anyone, but whenever I'm outside (usually only happens when I'm alone), I have an ideational fear that someone is going to shoot me. It scares me to the point where I'll find myself booking it to get into the next building. I don't know why I get this feeling, and it doesn't happen every time I go out, I just feel that it isn't normal... Any suggestions, anyone have any similar intrusive thoughts or fears?",7.0104255319148905,6.395014936170218,7.307957446808512,76.15300000000002,64.53191489361703,10.073191489361703,34.75744680851064,9.3871,3.1380408510638307,380,15,70,6,5,124,64,94,0.19,0.789,0.021,-0.9421,0,1,0,1,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,4,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,13,20,5,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,5,1,0,2,4,4,0,0,1,2,9,1,7,18,0,11,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,42,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18046461710888265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369842922605717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436714286154589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14680839612457264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5882200744066427,0.17620637702069494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592561967193726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18207098244142866,0.0,0.19805418092586544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3081674404140675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576014841244544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18531086337260946,0.0,0.17072248620501432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252069450652032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471724962395087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17444901071612393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14763668855422346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13833056583685352,0.1016032928996986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19190555558278286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722844119890364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,corndog54,2020/01/06,Why do I feel so alone when I'm depressed? Lately I've been feeling pretty down and it's only been getting worse with time. I know one part for why I've been feeling alone lately is because I've been working so much that I can't really hang out with my girlfriend as much as I'd like. But she's always there for me if I text her or call her. I have her and my parents and siblings there for me. But lately every day I just feel so alone. I don't really know why. Is there any way to fix this? I kinda just wanted to vent and let this out.,1.1435294117647068,2.46528524369748,3.0325126050420184,94.51616386554623,78.91596638655463,5.432268907563026,19.463025210084034,5.6839178017228535,-0.29960571428571425,420,9,99,2,10,141,67,119,0.126,0.8,0.075,-0.7851,1,3,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,9,2,0,0,0,0,11,0,0,0,0,22,20,14,0,2,6,1,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,4,4,16,1,12,15,3,11,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,3,7,64,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4355287458525967,0.0,0.0,0.11663459829246765,0.0,0.0,0.0953219835634396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544774456705098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313160979839631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039954952180887,0.0,0.12073021286928587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810122425307855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835013445645895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323425122445833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407008128567587,0.0,0.4743614435760789,0.0,0.0,0.1433356930371217,0.0,0.06848111463565258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20608556564571653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498439097258454,0.10660736492760203,0.0,0.0,0.15564477185932538,0.1517929616724538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14260564117631128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795959536052736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173560638464103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267726542487427,0.11126226225587198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794511461845266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020471176011167,0.0,0.1428475682120461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rubiojessica55,2020/01/06,"; I feel like I'm at the point where I don't see my life getting better. I am miserable no matter what happens and I can't seem to figure out how to make myself happy. I can't stop caring about what other people think and my and anxiety is so bad that I can't work anymore. I want to force myself to and have been applying for jobs but no luck there, I am sick of l being poor. I'm sick of life.",2.2812878787878788,2.627726977272726,4.477727272727275,89.08242424242425,74.68181818181819,7.2303030303030305,21.484848484848484,7.1686216300943375,0.445789393939394,306,6,72,3,6,107,59,88,0.27399999999999997,0.595,0.131,-0.9284,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,5,7,0,1,1,0,10,4,0,2,0,16,21,7,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,4,0,1,0,6,2,0,0,1,2,12,5,10,19,0,5,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,2,2,48,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19411008878061076,0.0,0.2516414874596226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21186195560739632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22441204389565764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587044187924545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829835870733755,0.18127161094394226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256846097416933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22438107791934536,0.27011050757433386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517973864528878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35844754713752885,0.12396434484213263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16937314398075945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591108014480486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239865924660124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20219759827372047,0.23099498930963874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21213765560954734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625860811587306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14966218199371714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847254406379734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_Dying,2020/01/06,"It’s not getting better I don’t think I can recover, at least from what I’ve tried. Everything from talking to people and trying every cope I can find, to eating healthier and exercising just doesn’t do anything for me. If there even is anything, what else is there for me to try",4.325892857142858,5.500225517857146,5.4628571428571435,80.83214285714288,70.60714285714286,8.457142857142857,28.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.189907142857143,223,8,43,4,4,74,40,56,0.048,0.9520000000000001,0.0,-0.3412,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,0,7,9,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,8,9,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,32,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4401208973583368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23650757665319286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736331618547094,0.2233916178989581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17662563838735126,0.0,0.22530937636033185,0.0,0.24033611136940625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24441323052063704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971373773602908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18539247069483344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21493872037976236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17134927067581854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5446733993913719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,psychocandid,2020/01/06,"I thought I was an intelligent, deep thinker but I scored VERY low in nearly every cognitive function (processing speed, working memory, attention, task shifting, problem solving) I feel so demoralized. I love learning. I’m intellectually curious. I’ve won awards for my writing. And my verbal IQ is in the 98th percentile. But I feel like an idiot. I was in the 4th percentile or lower on ALL cognitive functions. No wonder I’ve failed so many classes...",3.8827500000000015,7.107111775,5.23,71.815,81.25,7.7,34.25,8.548686976883017,3.83685,362,21,54,9,10,120,59,80,0.245,0.512,0.243,-0.0569,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,4,2,8,1,0,4,0,3,1,0,0,1,14,10,6,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,2,9,4,6,6,1,8,0,2,0,1,2,7,0,2,2,30,9,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29321638911338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3519321712698088,0.24862091873911515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002182054350776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140957771717418,0.0,0.0,0.35283107293708754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3330019256829608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27628385085193263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871475899691289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37740580277852864,0.2533579777150185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,takenyquil,2020/01/06,"Please hear me out, I'm sad, lonely, overthinking, numb Every Day Every morning, my motivation to get up is to smoke a cigarette, no other motivation. I'm always in a sad mood even when I am around my fraternity brothers. 

My background: I'm a junior in college, joined a fraternity as a sophomore bc I wanted more friends; I was introduced to drugs: cocaine, molly, ketamine, xanax, lsd, and adderall, and I don't think I've ever been the same since I've used all these. I don't do these drugs anymore but I did a lot as a Sophomore. I binge drink 2-3 times a week and casually drink 5-6 days a week. I have a gf who recently dropped out of college (dating for 3 months) so she's living back home which is an hour drive away.

Every single day seems so dull and stagnant, I have nothing to look forward to. I feel so lonely when the sun goes down and my loneliness makes me shut down and lie in bed. I used to see my gf everyday but since she dropped out, I see her maybe once every 10 days. I'm constantly overthinking that my girlfriend is doing anything suspicious (like cheating and talking to another guy). 

I dont know why but on rare occasional days I feel great and on those days, I don't feel lonely, sad, or overthink. 

I dont understand myself and I dont know how to make myself better. Help please. I've never went to therapy, and I don't think I want to go to therapy.",3.6928494623655936,4.733583903225807,5.2031881720430135,82.60478225806455,71.97491039426524,8.304014336917563,28.645340501792113,8.697196308434329,2.1026729749103943,1075,41,220,19,20,363,153,279,0.138,0.769,0.09300000000000001,-0.9086,0,6,7,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,0,3,10,15,1,0,13,0,18,6,0,7,3,41,44,22,0,2,4,1,3,1,4,0,4,1,2,1,7,14,2,0,11,3,0,4,9,9,0,0,4,7,32,5,28,40,5,40,0,7,3,0,13,15,0,3,22,128,39,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104099788851549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212784986707713,0.0,0.0,0.0965903315499251,0.0,0.0,0.08014833602450225,0.08670279350253828,0.0,0.0,0.09150643605171092,0.07489125673138884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613855347344487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525011654385938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.376872890677729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34244099220494795,0.19082135122778004,0.22589610734796498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432892008072927,0.08809995761345572,0.32824020335115056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773852829225606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524765141118554,0.0,0.05088521661442227,0.0,0.05535220254576643,0.0,0.0,0.10737906768531176,0.0,0.09643702373590007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977199621323012,0.0,0.0652822631739018,0.0,0.09769579605073593,0.0,0.09591511400808046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705222391083782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047582603685698284,0.0,0.08600215911796275,0.0,0.08178783130158478,0.0,0.0,0.08280231393778358,0.0,0.0,0.130024729212267,0.0,0.09784703926272828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777402929006897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751175433290098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345377011586048,0.0,0.0,0.1037232076518005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21382239194549527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616647214016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15522347489692834,0.08866535812132123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611334058748497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828294856741551,0.0,0.0,0.22276086869700026,0.0,0.0,0.12481442263803705,0.0,0.0,0.0567921971817003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139232511589318,0.0,0.16823717187878476,0.0,0.0,0.1148929767121799,0.0,0.15624985992999527,0.0,0.0,0.09028675989919813,0.08788444134339662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dankus_3000yeet,2020/01/06,"Is there a name for the following behavior? Is it normal? Hi. For the past two years I had OCD. Fortunately, it kept getting better! However, I have this problem (which started occuring maybe this year) where whenever I am alone, and I imagine something embarrassing, even if it did not happen, I proceed to do things like saying random things, sitting down on the floor, or duck and run to a wall and sit next to it.

I think that it is not normal, and I am interested in what can be causing it and what is the name for that (if there is one).

Thank you!",2.591944444444444,4.706821712962963,4.027555555555558,85.42300000000003,77.24074074074073,7.282962962962964,25.61481481481481,8.238735603445708,1.681685925925926,427,16,86,8,10,141,71,108,0.069,0.8270000000000001,0.10400000000000001,0.5885,1,1,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,1,4,6,0,1,6,0,13,0,0,1,0,20,20,8,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,15,5,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,2,0,2,3,1,8,4,9,16,0,16,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,4,7,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300465989463432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19644475566407488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281757148311983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670642212825724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604715358745085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19641764881390336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108515323022915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231467437672434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362243333326585,0.0,0.43525570767627697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051247228325199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21203615421604416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21253631691052408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17663664063715895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17099679620109673,0.0,0.0,0.15721581137596013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20449582363711435,0.0,0.0,0.2951298099919214,0.14232383624854242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169763868212986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860725962121589
mentalhealth,SecretIdentity8594,2020/01/06,"My family has a history of bipolar disorder and I’ve been suffering from what I believe may be manic phases since I already have depressive episodes. Am I right to worry or am I overreacting Every so often, without any real pattern to determine when or why I get them, I’ll suddenly enter this weird kind of episode.

It’s feel like I don’t need to sleep, I don’t need to stop, I don’t need to worry about anything. I feel unstoppable. I feel powerful! I feel like I’m on top of the world and I can do anything I want! Nothing in my real life matters and I can escape from everything real!

I CAN DO ANYTHING!

It’s the most amazing feeling in the world when it happens and I lose all inhibition, and it feels like nothing can limit me! My mind accelerates to immense speed and a million thoughts start speeding through my mind, but it’s not like I’m out of control and it’s not like I’m having a panic attack, it feels like I’m in control of my thoughts, and I feel faster and better and stronger than ever before. I’ve been really enjoying them recently just because they give me an escape from my depression, and my anorexia, and my anxiety, and everything that I’m struggling with every day.

The problem comes when they end, which could be hours or days later, (the longest I’ve ever had was a few weeks, and the shortest was about 48 minutes.) and I regret half the stuff I’ve done. I make deals and promises I can’t keep, and start crazy projects that I can’t finish. Sometimes the huge burst of inspiration and motivation which I get can allow me to to do loads of stuff I can’t get done usually, but most of the time I get left with loads of unfinished stuff since I couldn’t finish it in time.

I don’t know what these are of how I’m supposed to deal with them. Part of me thinks they are similar to the manic episodes my mum gets as part of her bipolar, but at the same time I’ve never done anything really mad like just boarded a ferry to France in the spur of the moment, but I think that’s mainly because I don’t have enough money to buy anything like that, or really anything at all. They don’t seriously effect me too much, but I usually end up struggling to clear up the mess I’ve made after them, as I’ll have stayed up without sleeping for some days days, and I’ll have a completely obliterated sleep schedule, in addition to all the problems I’ve caused and promises I’ve made and failed to keep.

I’m only even able to ask this now because I’m just coming out of one now. I’ve wanted to ask this question for months but I’ve always been too afraid that I’m overreacting and I’ll offend someone but I can now since I’m still in one.",5.869476278496612,5.3823174417744974,6.623776340110908,79.69271934688851,66.81885397412199,9.579322242760322,32.820764017252,9.029198982220553,2.627751891558842,2100,80,426,32,30,696,224,541,0.138,0.737,0.124,-0.897,2,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,8,10,20,33,3,4,22,0,42,6,3,10,7,106,88,40,0,10,18,1,8,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,24,30,0,6,17,0,3,3,15,18,0,4,13,8,53,15,63,70,13,63,0,6,0,0,16,21,0,10,46,275,77,3,0.06255559173155636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903165101910197,0.0,0.05205126354462615,0.0,0.0,0.04253994750010249,0.0,0.047854856452456566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088675314793343,0.0,0.11696206776969133,0.07116601641308394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439992429863845,0.0,0.053230201126515934,0.07047873028050723,0.0,0.05532533736032063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06426182443910859,0.0,0.10777220645220237,0.06558834776059883,0.0,0.14032283067374238,0.04994554980282118,0.0,0.0,0.1613727262874806,0.12898413653683855,0.10775807898956602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716941276866698,0.0,0.0,0.19204826753680693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11081137358166901,0.06463664842241687,0.0,0.0413173783628563,0.11317022819281522,0.10541156806876892,0.0,0.112441864480966,0.0,0.058971844579419036,0.0,0.2530398941175984,0.17875890892888846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341357396451972,0.06000902371619012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531770317520103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616046569912111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120456837365626,0.0,0.06514202247460582,0.034378917245606856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796683345152713,0.0,0.04418486442863095,0.2444920185203953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998370604694491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838322685465907,0.041756343232944464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263266301084351,0.0,0.049931276504970895,0.0,0.04598555766132949,0.13915253588977305,0.048246728773279984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004755480013418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477857581748277,0.047576346374771296,0.0,0.07339550854179311,0.0,0.13548321969472554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197145059398004,0.0,0.0,0.07007657925906212,0.0,0.0,0.21360587565729294,0.12022414167212332,0.0,0.06176610007209413,0.0,0.0,0.05342213354080287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15523989573597508,0.0,0.18780230589532865,0.0,0.05300314987357972,0.0,0.06186907976484805,0.0,0.08855433959891851,0.06667593749951398,0.04995697636317295,0.05229927574155848,0.0,0.1307933735058981,0.2148335587153077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016619459498893,0.0,0.0993243046149058,0.10943000579224016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779229300975596,0.0,0.07379381752553366,0.0,0.05017832239192881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564466916378585,0.0,0.0,0.12060271625544736,0.0,0.0,0.12705647984815716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yessicahaircut91,2020/01/06,"What is wrong with me? I’m going to describe the way I feel, to the best of my ability. I’ve been feeling so weird the past year or so.  Basically the best way to describe it is I don’t feel right, nothing really seems real anymore. I have panic attacks, and massive anxiety all the time. I’ll be sitting in my living room and I have to remind myself that I’m here and everything is real around me. Sometimes I’ll get a weird thought, that kind of feels like an explosion in my head and I start breathing really hard. Sometimes when I think about death or the afterlife, I feel like a massive shock going through my body and I find myself gasping for breath. Enough is enough, I really need to figure out how to fix this because I’m exhausted.",3.302225950782997,4.941110939597318,4.616258389261748,84.08174776286356,73.83221476510067,7.651230425055928,27.852908277404925,8.344100000000001,1.9779794183445192,586,23,115,10,12,194,89,149,0.165,0.726,0.109,-0.7891,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,2,7,12,1,1,9,0,9,5,4,1,1,25,25,11,1,1,2,0,6,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,5,8,0,0,10,0,0,2,1,7,0,0,2,6,17,5,16,22,5,16,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,3,7,73,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037487280623138,0.0,0.13449833759620825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073031952490247,0.0,0.15428703022972268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267253326873475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28464909509268965,0.0,0.0,0.1506429552007918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28026288477948075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188627535060173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3428670712580278,0.19377353529003355,0.0,0.0,0.12395398321469504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085571540175603,0.0,0.15415164448102495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148864646523215,0.0,0.13918497708070562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122708699087694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251390675510302,0.0,0.11975471297633765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056031700462396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301307959190993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912054117773522,0.0,0.0,0.12946438523968715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30872990467328393,0.26064442995995896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581851490328425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234631155968883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682627765633729,0.0,0.09599234830966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868996517739955,0.0,0.10766692278878727,0.07908095962406579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21529727026756854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14827889313089376,0.0,0.0873346645515748
mentalhealth,1Wittgenstein1,2020/01/06,"On trying to be happy I stress, I don't think this article is a quick fix or a ""snap out of it,"" but I do feel it is something worth being aware of.

[https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/jan/05/stop-trying-to-be-happy-and-put-a-smile-on-face](https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2020/jan/05/stop-trying-to-be-happy-and-put-a-smile-on-face)",25.335,33.73645157142857,11.085357142857143,31.170892857142892,33.285714285714285,5.785714285714287,17.32142857142857,7.1686216300943375,0.09600000000000007,315,3,29,2,4,69,28,35,0.057999999999999996,0.7979999999999999,0.14400000000000002,0.4215,0,0,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,5,8,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,5,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15242949736901168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209145410625554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6061101280842688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23208208231762004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5040756022665233,0.3453265394168103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931662640108683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046745909715328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ABunchofMistakes,2020/01/06,"I feel like everyone is duplicitous I constantly read into the things people say to me and assume that everyone is manipulating/judging/conning me.

For example, my girlfriend said to me out of the blue that she thinks one character on a tv show she likes will probably break up with his gf because there is a coworker that he spends lots of time with, and so that made me think she was trying to drop a hint that things aren't going well for us. I can't shake the feeling even though I know it's not rational. Sometimes I do come to believe these ""hunches"" though - like the things I say to people are sometimes coloured by influences unbeknownst to them.",10.814320000000002,7.6640401920000025,9.9248,68.43440000000001,59.08,13.840000000000002,42.6,11.979248473330829,4.881639999999999,524,22,98,12,5,167,85,125,0.045,0.877,0.079,0.6167,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,1,0,6,5,0,1,7,0,9,0,0,2,0,17,18,5,0,0,1,0,2,3,2,1,0,3,0,0,10,7,0,0,6,3,1,3,3,1,1,1,3,7,17,4,17,14,1,11,0,0,2,0,12,4,0,2,5,71,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890496678477224,0.0,0.0,0.18279810551000825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976241546695967,0.0,0.17533261128548766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071633733937918,0.0,0.0,0.3100701221308975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640750800952751,0.11591011133849323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220936310040284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916734051493551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23779875300658826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13793757574740992,0.0,0.15352312326757678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10994354598609064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22496487761191072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749309482844805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16229205743740416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15433514584784938,0.258052483334047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32093513959884057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3233713858840476,0.2079241274578361,0.3188159687319952,0.0,0.09460820148696338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015584413371228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19516454830473115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458805727740079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lilylee08,2020/01/06,Social anxiety?.. I’m having trouble dealing with some of my SHES vial anxiety. Please help? I tried opening up to my mother and she gave a long lecture on how she went through lots of things that were way worse and that I should brave through it all. I then told her that I couldn’t because I’ve tried multiple times and it always ends up triggering my anxiety and nervousness. She then told me that if I wanted to let my anxiety get the best of me and look/be pathetic then she wouldn’t know what to do. Maybe it’s just me but that hit really hard. Being called pathetic for feeling what I can’t control is hurtful. What should I do? I’m so scared of what might happen if I confront her again and ask for help..,2.036364532019704,4.172535262068969,3.1789408866995115,90.71836206896559,79.13793103448276,6.901477832512318,24.15024630541872,7.957251820313856,1.2965073891625625,563,20,119,10,14,181,89,145,0.205,0.7290000000000001,0.066,-0.965,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,4,7,1,2,2,0,14,0,0,3,1,26,27,14,0,7,4,1,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,13,8,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,5,2,22,2,15,14,4,13,0,1,0,0,17,4,0,5,7,85,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13138209470885925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4831599353837104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761141630968228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625191695877523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16570207770331813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122943783121707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17709375502082494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16278381050149268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398489622278216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983694599837979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249412670996056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396268836280951,0.0,0.14144377399195776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21166867897952416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16903090013444705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677549504015207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145932573576044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973296356923376,0.1325928465599481,0.0,0.0,0.13423750614290286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862772318131824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675026706570385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17332235832105253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115220068203286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15808140980480198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095505574239555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489906554671814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920704090923804,0.0,0.0,0.3017527290786721,0.0,0.21440199631540235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313113326015393,0.12533047047127302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463711448414122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16090948149625772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zebrastars79,2020/01/06,"This app is a wonderful way to track mental health!! You are one press away from joining Moodflow.
Here is your link: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.moodpixel",13.325507246376814,18.942485608695648,8.434782608695652,48.244637681159446,62.47826086956521,6.544927536231885,25.057971014492754,7.793537801064563,1.7859971014492757,151,4,18,2,3,41,22,23,0.0,0.831,0.16899999999999998,0.6467,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,3,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,12,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.408359407656004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4620029232414049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4380157713273532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29452390411728163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.344997694094586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4713494861954034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yesn1122,2020/01/06,"How do I get a proper diagnosis? TL;DR Actual question in first four blocks of text. The rest is me venting my thoights. I dont expect anyone to read all of it. I just think typing it out might help me. And if I do find a therapist, Ill have something to show them because I wont be able to say any of it out loud.

Ive seen a few different doctors about my depression and theyve just thrown pills at me. Ive tried getting a referral to a therapist a few times but it hasnt worked out.

I was set to see one after I graduated hs but then got shipped off to college so never got to go. I spent 5 years failing out of college, going back and failing out again. I tried a few times to go see someone but each time it was ""heres some pills, come back in a month""

One of the prescriptions caused extreme drowsiness. I would fall asleep while standing and talking to someone. One killed any and all concentration. And the rest just worsened my mental state.

I want a proper diagnosis because I believe theres more wrong with me than just depression. The way I think isnt normal, the voices I talk to in my head arent normal, my inability to do or accomplish anything isnt normal. At times its like Im not even me anymore. Like my being, my personality just up and left.

Or maybe Im still in there somewhere, just not in control? I try to do things, tell myself Im going to do things, plan for them, do everything in my power to ensure I do. And then.. I just dont. Even the things I want to do or enjoy doing I just dont. I cant.

Best example I can give is my desire to work out at least a few times a week. My job has a gym with free membership for employees. Ive gone as far as wearing my workout clothes under my uniform so after work I can just strip right down and hit them gym for an hour. 

But by the time I drive from the employee parking lot down the main street towards the gym, I end up just continuing to drive all the way home. The whole time Im internally screaming at myself to take the left turn, go to the gym. But my body just wont listen. I wont listen.

I litterally spend most of my time after work sitting and staring at walls. Wasting my time. I had big dreams, goals, and ambitions, but theyve been abandoned for sometime now.

I dont understand how most people just get it. Life that is. They graduate go to school and start living their dreams. Making friends having fun, enjoying life.

I question at times if maybe Im autistic or something of the sort. That is the sort of thing my parents would be ashamed of and hide from me. Other times I wonder if my problems are real or if they are just narratives Ive played through my head so many times that theyve become real. Am I really depressed? Or have I simply convinced myself I am and became depressed?

In a lot of social interactions I feel as though people, after they go back to their friends or whoever, they say somethung along the lines of ""Theres something off about that guy"". And I can see it in their faces a lot of the time as I try to be as ""normal"" as I can during our interaction. But Im not and probably never will be.

But then what is ""normal""? Theres no real standard for normal, you either are or youre not. Maybe I should ask why am I abnormal? That might be easier to define.

How to I overcome my introvsersion, my inferiority complex, and insecurities? I dream of living alone in a remote area away from anyone. I feel like I would be free then. I could be myself. I could be weird and unusual, express myself how I please. No worries of others seeing. But would I be happier?

Or would being alone allow my thoughts to consume me?

At times it feels like I cant breathe. I just suffocate in my fear, worry, and self hate. When did I become this way? Thats right, Ive always been this way. I think High school just kept me busy enough to not notice as much. Ive just been digging a hole deeper and deeper since then. Eventually Ill bury myself in.

Anyways, basic question at the top. I dont expect anyone to read all of that, its more for me. I think it might help to type my thoughts out. Maybe show a therapist if I ever see one.",2.325729096935362,4.107051265792613,3.899003379757378,87.57922559472303,76.86650774731822,6.647319868728265,23.76967035120088,7.513576367104585,1.007620229562264,3208,103,673,43,73,1067,332,839,0.12,0.7659999999999999,0.115,-0.8081,7,2,4,0,0,0,106.0,1,2,10,14,42,31,2,3,37,0,78,14,7,8,7,146,123,65,1,25,45,1,3,4,2,13,7,7,1,3,27,32,0,4,16,13,4,12,23,17,0,6,15,17,111,16,106,81,26,108,0,8,7,0,37,46,0,29,46,483,138,20,0.04480673502053252,0.0,0.043724909930808284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281252895403352,0.0,0.0,0.037282792929787895,0.0,0.0,0.06094023260475149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04443624121150839,0.09398973280451088,0.0,0.036872125140650996,0.0,0.041888248779576684,0.0,0.042097402499313055,0.1033608404282854,0.0,0.054627539574876,0.09897103708758616,0.0,0.0504818467038694,0.04702190404817664,0.0,0.0,0.04977018165245749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046028859449292296,0.0,0.038597034760731015,0.0,0.0,0.050254563319538745,0.07154906391336731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543679008689307,0.0,0.0,0.046813501469039835,0.0,0.045861591917444086,0.0,0.0,0.2625657987045725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039685467884643326,0.046297334871465666,0.0,0.05918885179735878,0.040530257060063066,0.0,0.0,0.04026940428150213,0.0,0.0,0.050420033911939534,0.0679668945543964,0.06401988090295482,0.0,0.0,0.04095254406631962,0.03811258591893377,0.0,0.0,0.06923514465790305,0.0,0.07022900915531878,0.04298270306562865,0.17825290058647664,0.0,0.07167207833812288,0.0,0.0,0.04436571217517204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04423737446577252,0.09196927374886547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06006601999764896,0.04734077560965129,0.04494480854346128,0.0,0.04412560836577537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29039377617904866,0.0,0.04446377071524522,0.0,0.04957201363012642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736529740509173,0.0,0.0632966440751647,0.08756122982169995,0.0,0.07913033584114003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11427925143134827,0.0,0.0,0.02990884355620496,0.04542699661567203,0.1800575510505698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04515465024414885,0.1425985953214914,0.0,0.0,0.03576430841220195,0.0,0.032938105769099495,0.0,0.06911543259085957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634065216969487,0.0,0.0510127647979164,0.0,0.0,0.12144881302931823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04975257672071103,0.0,0.0,0.06212669673831734,0.039123512743592215,0.0,0.04918433984254755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04830923871131783,0.04287399413290744,0.0,0.0,0.15058139317810373,0.0,0.08963772071874176,0.1529996216881285,0.028704341796175387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652941377538794,0.0,0.07126422819797193,0.0,0.09069361591639,0.1785258333191262,0.0,0.04674319661221992,0.0,0.0,0.0370645942290083,0.0,0.0,0.04567482370823821,0.07592920235909248,0.1034832410334589,0.0443150066405545,0.0,0.031714437666532425,0.0,0.03578271646661643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0336890884684648,0.07202791272109425,0.03916306134473477,0.0,0.0,0.15607221851291475,0.11907041512690457,0.11484138633797387,0.04402238966145365,0.07114308529086652,0.3657803452336689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168332755043647,0.04873686112448242,0.0,0.04664539135075578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052856346435168663,0.14226200270981934,0.03594126013287845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040431109114221285,0.05002511950966823,0.0,0.0,0.04859099280241734,0.13047934696234478,0.0910068287680534,0.0,0.15914709495277474,0.048989130865849634,0.0,0.028854068306710112
mentalhealth,somedudemack99,2020/01/06,What are the actual odds of inheriting mental illnesses from parents? I’m sure my dad and grandma have anxiety and my mom had bipolar disorder so where does that put me?,4.068020833333332,6.5985005937500025,5.901250000000001,71.75208333333336,74.3125,10.516666666666666,32.541666666666664,10.504223727775694,4.418779166666667,137,7,23,5,3,47,30,32,0.214,0.725,0.062,-0.6868,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,3,4,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.3228563847686125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25309504103462577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3791763163437077,0.0,0.28952414176367225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334133142043399,0.0,0.0,0.3874809329737598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3673635252397388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33258997633725257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118169077108046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DweltToaster,2020/01/06,"How do I build up the courage to get diagnosed? Is it even worth doing? TLDR: Friends and family members suspect one or more mental issues and I'm too hesitant to go to the doctor.

**Anxiety?**  
For years friends and family have mentioned that I may have some sort of social anxiety (I am very introverted and get extremely uncomfortable in crowded places, especially if it's loud e.g. clubs or in areas where there's so many people that all you can hear is the rumble of the crowd). For years I have shrugged this off because, overall, I'm not that bad. I don't have regular panic attacks - have had at least one but the situation was justifiable imo.

However, the last couple years I've gotten a little worse. I cry a lot more, I stress over situations that apparently don't warrant as much stress as I give them (according to family)... some would argue I'm worse with crowds e.g. if I can't get a seat on crowded public transport, theres a good chance I will end up in tears. However, overall, I am functioning.

​

**Depression?**

I'm now in university and things are not going well. I was fine in the first year, mostly. It was stressful but felt I dealt pretty well. But this year I've went completely downhill. I'm struggling to focused and get motivated, I'm leaving things to almost last minute which I never used to do (last year I tried to get things done at least a 2 weeks in advance so I had time to proofread/edit). Additionally, its taking way longer than it should. I'll be sitting at my computer, all notes in place, research completed and... it'll take me 4 hours to get like 200 words done. Or sometimes as long as 3 days to get 200 words done.

This isn't like me. Also, more tears. And stress because I'm struggling bc its like my brain won't let me do things I at least used to be able to do fine. I'm miserable. I've got plenty to be happy about: A family, a partner, close friends who I completely adore and who have proven they'll be there for me. Yet, I'm struggling to see the light. I hate this.

My partner thinks I've got depression, he may be right as its something he also suffers from.

​

**ADHD/Autism??**

This I'm adding mainly bc my partner has these suspicions. He's said many times that he thinks I have one or the other. I'm a little skeptical bc in my head if I had these, surely someone would have noticed when I was a child- but I can see where he's coming from when he lists my symptoms. But here it goes:

* I don't pick up on what are apparently very obvious social cues.
* I struggle to focus on just one thing at a time without having other stimuli in the background e.g. music or tv.
* If I am focusing on one thing, its as if nothing else exists and it'll take a while for me to notice other stuff. Apparently he can be talking about something for minutes before I turn and go ""what, sorry?"" while from my perspective, I've heard maybe a sentence.
* I dont stop moving. I'm always either tapping my foot or rocking slightly
* Sometimes I get ""sensory overload""

That's the gist of the list he's gave me multiple times at least, I think.

​

Anyway, I'm nervous about going to the doctor because I don't want to waste anyone's time if I'm just being paranoid. I'm overall functioning, the only reason I'm even contemplating going is because it's messing with my uni work now.

Part of me doubts that the doctors can/will even do anything. I haven't really had good experiences - quite a few of the doctors I've been to in my life haven't been great and that's when going to them for physical ailments so... you understand my hesitation.",2.3493476963475786,4.693379891242942,3.815680751173709,85.46698137980427,79.18361581920905,6.644099626004615,24.943582398344873,7.777084706406198,1.4876432481897028,2825,106,548,47,71,931,309,708,0.14800000000000002,0.753,0.099,-0.9893,5,0,2,0,0,0,131.0,0,2,3,5,30,38,4,12,29,0,67,10,3,6,5,73,122,46,0,10,23,0,1,3,6,10,7,4,0,4,42,17,0,1,8,3,1,11,14,21,2,6,21,8,55,17,73,83,18,77,0,4,2,0,37,34,0,21,33,348,97,8,0.0525927430122086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320625678177927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05266403512073869,0.0,0.0,0.08411679517125703,0.043761375302958164,0.1709526452421362,0.1917178179672587,0.0,0.0,0.08046660890334327,0.0,0.0,0.036774068756319785,0.0,0.043279346306925065,0.0,0.0,0.05983183771128596,0.0,0.0,0.043912743614850966,0.12824019196820127,0.0,0.044752550664832115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871089466603181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045303991225296894,0.1654274712884753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819286981304937,0.057770658633953975,0.03391796835380119,0.0,0.09059610498302803,0.05338052708884846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21532360407332832,0.0,0.1614619077355481,0.061638303119997136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04393448823331656,0.0,0.04658155995565996,0.0,0.0,0.10421103223677357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05144579442210115,0.19831902991058972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05049728093518559,0.0,0.0,0.04473536033916941,0.0,0.0,0.12189906836787767,0.0,0.2198203003076912,0.050451751399979865,0.17933800712445888,0.08822459518569847,0.08412644205074195,0.05798368483965311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05598595289457856,0.0,0.05192444541533929,0.05397532733725238,0.0,0.05927584369889428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0517932578657012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05489315968113924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286103150445591,0.0,0.05568812105732057,0.0,0.05377964299734018,0.03714780974171513,0.07708247302110953,0.10542349021514323,0.0,0.04654292256869828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04471246937469179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664157331390912,0.052836479300884025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053001115011134727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589776263152363,0.03866171751254298,0.0,0.04056276565077764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05046415535433705,0.11975437300350625,0.0,0.0,0.1781910188797994,0.039999150980550006,0.0,0.06170625218531281,0.0,0.056952815556829364,0.0,0.036461185960754136,0.0,0.10989644530602982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05350572707582744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055938855962182434,0.0,0.0,0.03369225788777208,0.0540740991255299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04491391517056044,0.05002774222157615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381921395067632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182328933905484,0.0,0.10722335668129007,0.04456166048434245,0.08097692603949166,0.10403113526406196,0.058873269970878016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04396988810534886,0.2409792377126187,0.21992541642046326,0.06020610804545521,0.0,0.0,0.04956803787945916,0.05466399739132498,0.11862959249266485,0.04227205465551548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20964168914304868,0.10109791836100804,0.0,0.0,0.1533362569502731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03570702022696971,0.057205802010948235,0.0,0.05475090025841031,0.0,0.09084648770766317,0.0,0.08678904188539338,0.03102056245958596,0.0417456714124064,0.042186726099038785,0.0,0.09457438420499142,0.048753999676462496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050697527487358056,0.0,0.038288143289434015,0.0,0.10719299650635443,0.07472075135271809,0.0,0.1917178179672587,0.20320801307430084
mentalhealth,SuperMegaPP8304,2020/01/06,"Anyone know what’s going on? I posted this maybe half an hour ago on r/vent but I need some answers, so I’m here now. I’ve struggled with mental health for years now and recently I’ve been feeling this overwhelming sense of paranoia and anxiety, not quite like somethings wrong but like I need to get to a safe place and soon. It’s happened to me once before when I was being stared at by a guy on my bus. I have no clue what’s going on and it scares me. I have to have a video playing to feel comfortable, I have to hear a voice, but I have no clue what’s going on. Anyone have any clue what this could be or what’s going on? Anyone have a word for me to google? Please, if you’re able to give me any information, I beg you.",1.1698901098901118,2.801850128205132,2.749304029304028,95.19807692307694,79.76923076923076,5.739194139194139,18.83516483516484,6.5431188927421005,-0.1819142857142864,564,12,133,5,14,185,89,156,0.171,0.735,0.095,-0.9045,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,1,6,9,0,3,6,0,12,1,0,0,0,22,26,11,0,4,6,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,10,5,0,1,5,2,0,4,3,4,0,1,2,5,15,5,20,21,1,21,0,1,1,0,5,8,0,3,10,83,25,0,0.16068197700110207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424348776157579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21853850876104547,0.0,0.1229212725999316,0.0,0.0,0.3370577230836726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13672852764112234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829148382391367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624912710499336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394970107904554,0.15414079383984672,0.3652770817893576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910041961552826,0.14209054160169635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17079742772418238,0.18110026609062152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823938042662786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830661236307602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700219520515502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16142664302322204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16192964001278626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23828729990475886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17112106141374794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16787846655067254,0.1763805588551158,0.0,0.0,0.15388891736615135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17090506127616975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586540674704457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16087069017562994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12370083610658145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797969015909422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17568051757137107,0.0,0.10347392502315647
mentalhealth,sksgankajsba,2020/01/06,"I'm a mess and idk what's going on To start this off, I'm 13. Not sure how this relates to anything but some people like to know an age so they can better understand where I'm coming from or whatever.

So basically my life is controlled by the need for everything to be ""perfect"", basically following the number 12 and It's making me insane because idk if it's normal or not and I'm probably faking it but it feels so real and I get genuine fear when I do something wrong because I'm always like ""Do this or kill yourself"" and when I don't do it I have to come up with rules to make sure I don't kill myself because if I do then I'll have a big pile of numbers leftover that I have to fix but they're all inside my head so idk what numbers they are. This makes to sense but that's what thisll be hh

So I was putting away the dishes earlier today and there were 9 plates that I put away in 3 groups of 3 so they'd be even but I still had to count them and turn it into 12 like so,,,
So basically 3=1+2 and 3x2x1=6 and since there are two equations there 6x2=12 and that just how I do everything that I count and I count everything. And I didn't have to do each group of 3 since there were three math equations, it cancelled out the three groups leaving with a 12 and a 0 and 12+0=12.
I have to do that with everything I count. And I have to count everything. If I try not doing it, I'm just filled with indescribable fear that makes me shiver and want to cry. It makes me feel like it's a life or death thing.
It's the same with stairs. There are 13 steps at my house and because it needs to be 12, I only step on 12 but they all have to be the same weight so I skip the one with the most weight (papers and random things always collect to the side of the stairs) on it in an attempt to balance out my weight so it's even. If there's a living animal on a stair and I skip it and the animal stays on the stair my entire go up the staircase, it automatically equals my weight. If I skip an animal but it does move, it equals half of my weight. The goal is to only step on 12 stairs but still have them all with as close to my weight as possible have being left on them.

And with the whole stairs thing, there's also just the need for things to be equal. I'll step once too many with my left foot and then my right foot feels uneven, and the only way to fix it is with pain. So I'll kick my foot, bit it into things, anything it takes to cause just enough pain to make it even. If it's too much, the other foot feels uneven and it needs to be hurt too.
Each sidewalk tile  needs to be stepped on exactly three times. If I skip one, ex, do 2 by accident, the next time I have to do 4. If I do an extra one, the next one will have one less step to balance it out. If not, I feel uneven with the foot that messed it up. 
It's the same with my arms. If I touch something once on one arm, I have to do it on the other arm. If not, you guessed it, pain.

Everything just works though. I have an image in my head of a big factory with millions of containers containing exactly 12 units and it's a perfect, seamless fit. Every time I do three steps on a sidewalk, the three are put into a big pile to save up to make 12s. The 12s I do go straight to the containers. Any random things too also make it there. That's how I manage to not do everything 12 times, I just get the image of, say, doing something 4 times and instead of needing to do it 8 more times, it goes in with all of the 3s to save up for more 12s.

But I don't even know if anything's really wrong tbh. I don't feel like this is normal but I'm sure lots of people have it worse and I'm really regretting even typing this out but hngg it's better to face it head on ig but I feel like I'm faking it and I probably am because I'm too much of a wimp to tell my parents to get a diagnosis or actually find out if this is all just me being stupid and overthinking but like hhn idk I just needed to vent if even to nobody but me and this isn't even all of it I just can't even describe some of it it's just all based around these rules I've had since I was 7 and have slowly been building on. and I don't want to Google it or anything to see what's wrong because I can't say it's anything until I get diagnosed and just hhnn",1.4079610389610409,2.72096503978495,3.153507889959503,93.96558651026396,78.17204301075269,6.379555927943025,20.357491970395195,7.0352671518487035,0.157933947772658,3317,77,799,36,77,1106,285,930,0.12,0.8220000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.996,1,0,3,0,0,1,74.0,0,1,7,8,56,34,3,2,46,0,71,25,12,13,14,178,123,91,3,26,51,2,14,7,0,1,6,2,0,0,72,61,7,4,11,0,0,18,15,18,0,14,8,17,71,16,113,103,28,90,0,2,1,0,16,52,0,27,25,543,143,6,0.0,0.0,0.0459449309216439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07530240965201622,0.07835146365930518,0.0,0.0,0.03201715888957648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193721067144815,0.0419126797008324,0.0,0.0,0.08846958188694998,0.0,0.0,0.17220334149289693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832798449918416,0.051401003706536816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04836585761174368,0.0,0.0811134018877689,0.0,0.0,0.0528061108385891,0.0,0.0,0.05171701790901434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477869171085414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04120149800665602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04864796419001759,0.0,0.24877606027908375,0.0,0.03966834848173061,0.0,0.29619786538794485,0.0,0.0,0.10595996555815806,0.16664139473672554,0.10090549106971332,0.0,0.0,0.04303180523802284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983929444167364,0.0,0.080272816214453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051865781779172566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495816924467034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05432594078918289,0.050401915339117837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417781285253963,0.0,0.05174972328781289,0.0,0.0,0.04985270416058765,0.1023087725171115,0.0,0.06651037004323827,0.1610121246308349,0.0,0.04157398860032888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04002716316701484,0.0,0.0,0.2514191115884481,0.04773343672491405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05004037792619643,0.06922090847737977,0.24437329924002496,0.0,0.0,0.10014380784430683,0.0,0.09226010575991052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028091147318274,0.19142260100629974,0.1074232243419841,0.15029469041709642,0.0,0.05227863714811775,0.0,0.0,0.06528102160870808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05307752334653695,0.0,0.0,0.10152403465123264,0.0,0.0,0.1419902861670012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053589262662271264,0.06032346335594406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04020749996910405,0.0,0.07488248796672961,0.0,0.0,0.03751800560621322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683936393593397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10873733915870423,0.0,0.0,0.03332465750331799,0.05018280958217606,0.0751989856056438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312178690758525,0.0,0.03539956617283197,0.0,0.04115146608675197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876738685045005,0.0,0.04625751442831593,0.0,0.16472224761109475,0.0,0.04462793029743272,0.0,0.0,0.03196537218411386,0.05121135117820708,0.045991962982883904,0.049013692350993114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553999286853216,0.037371248434933835,0.0,0.3439968355499325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0525650176033696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034276025910474184,0.0,0.047980257202587966,0.0,0.1544292878204605,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plumjolly,2020/01/06,I am sorry if this is the wrong place to ask but I would like to seek help for my mental health and I don’t know how to go about it. I have a physical for the first time in over a decade this week. Is this something I should being up during then? I have never tried to seek help before and I just don’t know where to go,-0.12922619047619222,1.4938104027777823,1.6964285714285732,101.22,83.8611111111111,4.669841269841268,13.063492063492065,5.288315135182226,-1.4328674603174605,247,2,64,1,7,81,48,72,0.046,0.805,0.149,0.8462,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,1,1,11,15,6,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,0,8,1,11,12,0,12,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,6,47,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23609280630143026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21489475696846885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21481221171014026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287051031235076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268440480965063,0.0,0.0,0.3385473405495298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27758110658926777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337933116154101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545030743538379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19477606386673912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638527810694844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944192742402152,0.0,0.28270024511190284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725935028180476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714595329149078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025740682412636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793986874927097,0.2761151807813376,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheRealDietGlue,2020/01/06,"Fear of video games? I don’t understand it but I am terrified of some video games. I’m 15 and I’ve always wanted to play video games but my mom usually wouldn’t let me because she said it’d distract me from my school work. I still don’t have any type of game console but I DO have a Nintendo 3DS that my aunt (bless her heart dude) gave me on Christmas when I was 10. I also got a game called “Disney Magical World” with it. I remember enjoying the game except for the parts where you had to fight ghosts, I absolutely HATED fighting the ghosts and I remember being terrified of fighting. It’s not that the ghosts were scary it’s just that I hated the fighting part. Fast forward 4 years later, I beg my mom for a new game and she buys me ocarina of time and animal crossing new leaf. I enjoy playing new leaf and although it gets kinda boring sometime it’s still an enjoyable game. However I am horrified of playing ocarina of time. I hate the fact that most of the game requires you to fight. And I just don’t understand why I’m so scared. Many other people playing fighting games and they do it to RELIEVE anxiety but it does the opposite for me. It’s not that I’m scared of the way the monsters look, I’m afraid of the fighting part for some reason. I literally feel no joy when playing ocarina of time, only fear and dread. Why am I like this? Does anyone else experience this? Idk",1.5224147465437774,3.938878200000001,3.2725806451612907,87.68725806451616,83.07142857142857,6.7557603686635925,23.675115207373274,7.941651935203635,1.4737649769585257,1096,41,221,22,31,364,140,280,0.28,0.611,0.109,-0.9965,1,0,0,0,12,0,23.0,0,2,1,2,9,30,10,7,15,0,17,1,1,1,1,32,33,17,3,2,9,3,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,18,9,0,1,6,19,1,2,7,18,0,0,6,3,32,12,23,23,6,20,1,0,1,0,29,4,0,4,16,135,50,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703778898796374,0.0905620177679682,0.0,0.0,0.07401363999645796,0.0,0.08326084834838501,0.0,0.0,0.07610212990461461,0.11151749500858783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06634669536315302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113586859721172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19048990894518167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092026647853653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646454587606674,0.0,0.2449462418544513,0.05503181341466349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056863414953276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704777085970875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223652718230258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12897367214987654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112943309245329,0.0,0.05317279787643212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139659215113577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034475025520377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549397338354425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153495446376837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277627923543222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35358316725786804,0.0,0.07545463431986338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190369342578872,0.0,0.0,0.2465847004244568,0.0,0.10352995646495262,0.0,0.21793184946932628,0.11014996745990993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764366356156348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17383649398469686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19039311351988994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22660860028680302,0.0,0.0,0.11986979026109465,0.0,0.06419553108623371,0.08639061752546323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19641891254639973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923543281890055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700881677934238
mentalhealth,Stingwing4oba,2020/01/06,"NSFW Some days I'm convinced our own government is trying to kill us Really. EBT cut for us ""the disabled and elderly"" because were not able to keep A job or get one, yet, those that fall under the work requirement get to keep theirs or get more.

""Disabled"" people are supposed to get equal pay, but laws allow employers to pay less than min. wage. I know that might be for the benifet of those wanting to stay on disability income, but for those that don't, we get screwed.

Can no longer function lately because I keep seeing an empty cupboard, and empty fridge and in the process, am now limited on which food pantries I can go to and not only that, got a cut in EBT because allegedly my rent went down, despite proving otherwise, and income increased. Rent went up because income did. And so did some of my bills because I live in an area where the local politicians allow some businesses that practice fraud and price gouging be the only ones to operate here.

90% of the day and night, I keep my lights off just to afford power

And am lectured by local mental health places to be more responsible, yet at the same time cut our services because the government cuts the budget and they want to exercise their rights of A raise in pay just to go out and have adventures while we get criticized by having basic needs like running water and toilet paper?",9.966285511363637,7.5956799609375025,9.066051136363637,71.51474431818183,59.9375,11.80909090909091,39.28835227272727,10.018931242160765,3.8503015625,1074,41,192,16,11,338,154,256,0.127,0.789,0.084,-0.8762,10,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,6,0,3,4,8,9,6,0,15,0,16,5,0,2,1,42,37,18,1,3,8,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,2,0,9,15,2,6,2,1,9,7,4,6,0,2,6,2,17,3,34,27,10,36,0,0,1,1,9,18,1,6,11,130,26,13,0.11786216329392192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43108608472155735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520226896621764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251939569576982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3694686944380776,0.0,0.13396756706910962,0.0,0.09426513889967213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12528196809821018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696001063907585,0.4190452246996877,0.1303970209524328,0.0,0.06477396258448169,0.0,0.13295365391002456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057581499537584326,0.0,0.10407444952346458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877733912361622,0.12503312965163071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739330065639472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060565604943973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597329042894451,0.17927897251502742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171078379765975,0.0,0.12314087495944158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550551983926196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065364346509008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392088447953273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562538401149465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872637523909561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800206722009829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28354734091436673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13903631522821716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185188123679016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580505860956507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,parkmeyer,2020/01/06,"I need help I need help! so I have anxiety and depresion, when I get frustrated with stuff I shutdown, I need grade 12 math for college, but their is a problem I never learned anything above grade 7, because I struggled with math and would give up, so my school put me in a locally developed class, where I learned the same stuff over and over again. I am also really bad at spelling and punctuation, as you can tell from my post.I dont know what to do I feel fucked, I feel like an idiot.  The clock is ticking down for me to apply for classes, and I dont even understand what my options are, how does it work if I want to aply for something but I dont have the classes needed?  Whats to say I will be able to do the math, my memory is bad and it takes me longer to learn shit. I dont know what to do, no one will help or guide me with this shit because  they say I have to do it on my own, but I dont know how to or where to begin I feel like im retarded.",4.668055069930071,3.4118421778846155,5.853776223776226,86.77304195804197,69.52884615384616,9.486713286713286,29.96678321678321,8.575989854853784,1.836984615384616,735,23,179,10,11,248,109,208,0.21899999999999997,0.713,0.068,-0.9906,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,2,1,10,11,5,1,7,0,22,3,2,2,1,37,39,19,0,8,6,0,3,2,0,3,0,2,0,0,10,9,0,0,10,0,0,1,7,9,0,1,0,5,32,2,26,35,2,16,0,0,0,1,10,10,3,4,7,124,42,14,0.10565136256572837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448935647302702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082300318228616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694206931209532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642894936404127,0.1288081799991484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245621935323728,0.0,0.6191130503837178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978172855293213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602615101444591,0.15095470905419353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767298224864042,0.055198476341412735,0.10135041402951582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21244764387799656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412160143582735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17418967753288075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323183818631584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3133565865557337,0.08148484401059221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159209755329188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118480060391064,0.0,0.0,0.10109408544722123,0.0,0.10620880048070433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768296821735872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16803640809491086,0.0,0.10692481937356696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168992108456883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813355805616615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104497435238518,0.2418910665414516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943667617512498,0.0,0.09234394765475283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10998679442634424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06231591097368223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691545024950537,0.0,0.0,0.07505169668101459,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,paxtonswaney1,2020/01/06,"Anyone know what this is called? Me and my brother have a wierd trait I havent really noticed from other people I have interacted with. When someone comes to hate us or get angry with us we just laugh. Not in a disrespectful way, but we cant help it. My best friend of 2 years now hates me, but I'm feeling the best I have in years.",1.830333333333336,3.418592128571433,3.457142857142859,91.0561904761905,77.71428571428572,6.3809523809523805,20.238095238095237,7.1686216300943375,0.2605238095238089,259,6,59,3,6,86,53,70,0.135,0.625,0.24,0.8937,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,4,0,0,2,3,6,2,0,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,13,13,5,0,0,5,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,1,11,4,7,13,2,8,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,1,4,41,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444345331514588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4335528928388527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21092520429243344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17793681917231474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444509620148143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595910345410304,0.0,0.1079213000013037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4078788823944908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13845566900383152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135223149390482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351747786221586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320564872183253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13233035406240212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502122680954948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4969427413588887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16396109447391294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660412213790205
mentalhealth,australiaisburning,2020/01/06,Overthinking I constantly think of all the bad things i’ve done in the past (which aren’t actually that bad) and create scenarios of consequences that might happen and what people will think of me if they were to find out. How do i stop it’s really draining.,6.496933333333331,6.884139359999999,6.722000000000001,76.55433333333336,65.4,11.466666666666667,28.66666666666667,11.20814326018867,3.1740666666666666,208,6,40,6,3,67,41,50,0.114,0.843,0.042,-0.5574,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,1,1,11,9,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,6,5,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,29,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.26774867603719266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4581803427784878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964999692327623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807790561543011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25077214501901146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426273251829248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910666190241897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619202767682827,0.1902158383467384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17577050529336427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293882907970617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18228137036689765,0.3516145510068046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brielzibub,2020/01/06,"My therapist is trying to manipulate me into sticking with her, even though it's not working out. When I first started seeing this therapist, I noticed she wasn't charging me copays. I pointed it out, and she said it was ""out of the kindness of her heart because she doesn't think I can afford them."" She was right, and I did wind up on Medicaid after. My Medicaid is applicable starting from 11/15 and I started seeing her in September.

It's not working out with this therapist. We have completely different goals for what my progress would look like, and she adamently refuses to help me work on myself as a person because she thinks the problem is exclusively how other people treat me. She knows it's not working out, but keeps saying things like ""you know, hopefully you stick with this. I didn't charge you copays because I believe in you"" and ""I could have charged you for those copays but I didn't."" I canceled an appointment once because I was sick, and she assumed it was because I didn't want to come in. Now she texts me every week to make sure I'm coming. I'm still sick 6 weeks later, and whenever I come in she can tell. It's always ""well thank you for coming in, I would have hated to charge you.""

I'm worried that if I switch therapists, she's going to bill me for hundreds of dollars of copays that she originally forgave. The amount she didn't charge me is probably equal to a month of rent. Rent is $500 and my total income is $800/month, so I can't afford to be hit with a charge like that. The money does not exist, even on credit cards.

How can I sever ties without getting billed or sent to  collections?",5.067530040053407,5.80130084423676,5.8106809078771695,80.6284112149533,68.595015576324,8.606497552291946,30.238985313751673,8.704169506293173,2.3198368491321766,1285,48,246,20,21,420,159,321,0.07200000000000001,0.82,0.109,0.8346,6,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,1,7,1,7,10,12,1,0,8,0,28,3,1,5,2,52,56,18,0,7,9,0,0,3,0,2,2,2,2,1,17,23,0,2,5,0,7,6,12,2,1,1,12,5,55,10,41,39,3,36,0,0,3,0,32,17,0,4,16,178,72,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124899226072481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29761937018104645,0.0,0.0,0.11001319509174216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.336452280757755,0.1023795926687892,0.0,0.0,0.07796209569260343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020189079106388,0.0,0.0,0.08545035501134504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289880447170713,0.0,0.08227066064272799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305732899880351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0510158151874928,0.0,0.05549426578436016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640485095559027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571055005853675,0.06544981223794391,0.0,0.0,0.09698415000722987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679192876270969,0.0,0.10168290487990736,0.10732697694554967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431141779839424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199774244618023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517922096667213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15587963181114084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11117020498087626,0.0,0.10398941665738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769519000336142,0.08526040391080153,0.0,0.0,0.09230668887845277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527851198189994,0.09343368733268276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338884052039923,0.09288336146756364,0.07765172979701024,0.0,0.0,0.15562186102314252,0.0,0.0,0.11031177614939064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20734225346587992,0.0,0.07797993188812233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092029857338036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534659069391635,0.0898989834974574,0.0,0.4534964426422548,0.06487142242365128,0.12513476293684458,0.09593634263500464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629497793408004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057593926647727126,0.0,0.15665088030697338,0.0,0.08779515448426432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412690963073538,0.0,0.28434874692710665,0.0991638842638974,0.0,0.1387293179508952,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cocainely,2020/01/06,"Idunno if I can post this here but I'm lost: I began abusing meth And I am on Effexor+Zyprexa to treat mental illness. Apparently the comedowns take a person in my situation longer to recover from and they cause bad mental health problems. Well, I'm only a few weeks on daily usage and I'm still low dose(I don't wanna say specific because I don't think I should here) but a week and a half ago or so I stopped using for 2 days. 2nd day I was just wanting to die. I'm scared of getting off this drug. I don't want this kind of plague.

How can I get over this hump? I can physically function but mentally I truly cannot. All the symptoms my meds treat come back even worse when I don't use meth now. It'll probably last upwards of a week, maybe a little less. I don't think I can do it.

I'm just scared is all. I made a big mistake.",-0.11066255778120038,2.1143541355932207,2.1477272727272734,93.99428736517723,89.56497175141243,5.026091422701592,19.344889573703128,6.574015621080383,0.1130248587570626,650,20,146,8,22,219,110,177,0.261,0.6659999999999999,0.073,-0.9883,1,0,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,1,12,11,0,2,9,0,16,5,0,5,2,28,34,12,1,7,7,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,6,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,7,1,1,4,1,18,4,14,28,4,23,0,2,0,1,3,8,0,2,13,88,24,0,0.0,0.15905128249879774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189947877650906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322151687693333,0.11208397081563597,0.08183085791691659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379004468070558,0.0,0.11563502556034125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731461194243132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13931890453211318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15567463996954548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866360373152672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14026869022617325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268979622877134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13978927743757694,0.0,0.109422714314826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13454275943442096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653774292463434,0.0,0.0,0.12702020227567154,0.0,0.0,0.13486113406857184,0.0,0.14910928425465786,0.0,0.40584406295864855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10209482036640444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172123305368119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856386980430728,0.0,0.14473236319354146,0.12844860850493936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675225312378896,0.2687933454994582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15089027787087175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072034512206986,0.11222982782382968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13952573635602164,0.10093103344091564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202988165929672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23187881782647546,0.0,0.0,0.15835529876702945,0.0,0.3230353233014183,0.0,0.1206969964358372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680102520394036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Usuii6,2020/01/06,"Looking for someone to talk to Lost all the people i loved most , been betrayed so many times it makes me call myself stupid and i almost overdosed on pills last night , if theres someone whod like to talk that would be nice",2.8256666666666668,4.827292844444443,2.695277777777779,95.77625000000003,76.1111111111111,4.5,22.36111111111111,3.1291,-0.2415555555555557,178,5,37,0,4,53,40,45,0.184,0.6459999999999999,0.17,-0.19699999999999998,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,1,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,1,7,8,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,4,3,5,3,2,4,0,1,1,1,5,1,0,3,4,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603335960264428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26546985084820146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119193596723279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701367164005006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21831871197526811,0.0,0.2838001674777418,0.0,0.23464316390500675,0.0,0.17353945541043528,0.263580109301147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439747243787256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802382144624932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4405624176803711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41792604667176586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15159711587454716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468316995511247,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,killorbekilled333v2,2020/01/06,How do I make the dark thoughts stop Please they won't stop I don't wanna tell anyone because I don't know want to be institutionalized I know that's what they'll do I don't want to hurt anyone please help they won't stop,0.7720408163265304,2.7795384489795936,2.1993469387755127,96.74922448979594,82.87755102040815,4.736326530612245,15.922448979591836,5.6839178017228535,-0.98378693877551,180,3,44,1,5,58,27,49,0.192,0.594,0.214,0.4646,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,9,0,0,2,0,11,15,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,8,0,3,10,0,3,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,23,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31690898185375793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13814241272387384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15189527095252697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24259606569146724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490833768077441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15126728543107446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4975104811204304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5683809111805888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198071515792848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17990701260176514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673268201770261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wildbitch4120,2020/01/06,"I tried to save an old friend from inevitability And I failed. Told her mom anonymously about her Xanax addiction. She did nothing but ask her kid about abusing. She then posted later on social media going off saying “who ever is a snitch and told my mom I was gonna OD, you’re a snitch.. if I wanna OD then I will.”
I’m at a loss for words. I don’t know where else to talk about this kind of stuff other than here. I don’t know how to help someone with that kind of mental health problem",0.7995989304812845,2.9713837549019573,2.255775401069521,95.40553475935828,84.0,4.885561497326204,16.13547237076649,6.1124844417494595,-0.5903843137254898,381,7,85,3,11,123,75,102,0.126,0.797,0.077,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,7,7,0,0,4,0,6,3,0,1,1,13,14,7,2,3,2,2,0,0,1,2,3,1,0,1,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,4,1,13,4,16,8,0,11,0,2,0,0,17,4,0,1,5,54,18,1,0.0,0.20996666714933995,0.0,0.19318670849048106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656688445045961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480374812971243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16029796065116747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13691317671145756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071338767910537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883675534059277,0.0,0.0,0.1187811428852604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3690770451600015,0.1947816280612889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785875262850489,0.0,0.0,0.41509596860307896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003922783326572,0.0,0.1859536745552747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16971964535297673,0.0,0.0,0.16956748668754898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092570928658882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806448225256035,0.15015074138310192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028647869168297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243590291126726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33866639317173863,0.0,0.12031498605274722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway53627636,2020/01/06,"Any advice? (M14) Sorry if this is all over the place, I’m pretty tired so sorry if it seems scattered. So I am a 14 year old guy from Athens GA and I have been suffering my depression and suicidal thoughts for a while now. I’m thinking of telling my therapist about it but if I do that I know he is probably gonna send me to a hospital. Should I tell them? I’m kinda nervous because I know I probably will go and from what I hear it’s like a prison and that has me scared. Also I’m not sure what will happen with school because I’m doing online school and I’m scared of getting behind. I’m also not sure what hospital I’ll go to, does anyone have an idea? 

But if i do end up going, how can I make the best of it? How can I make friends with other people and what should I expect? Thanks for any advice.",0.9921459537572268,2.7050364335260118,3.0869906069364177,92.18863619942199,80.61849710982659,6.17471098265896,20.63908959537572,7.1686216300943375,0.4181101156069365,625,17,142,8,16,212,98,173,0.17600000000000002,0.7190000000000001,0.106,-0.8226,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,1,8,11,0,3,7,0,16,1,0,4,3,33,38,19,1,7,8,0,0,1,1,5,1,1,0,1,12,8,0,0,6,0,0,4,2,5,0,0,2,1,17,6,15,31,2,12,0,2,0,0,8,3,0,6,6,91,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523247561229866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064944803381437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17559508699280654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902749825679306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15740549639952348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135490380968175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120012109973207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298286415207295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435094497835635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974815265322867,0.0,0.0674533524895303,0.0,0.22012434324588664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278367468569481,0.11416935694699992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14551356261597914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574667939282313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190823729733776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307541467498322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17236054939824985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354766280462479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950690087692546,0.0,0.13488988327643828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13134876673728632,0.2783994944387103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25851830870567194,0.26132741369433155,0.0,0.11753464076387175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890506054990022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122267608119618,0.0,0.2433646265876247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256913329601284,0.118864861808405,0.0,0.14990378613902644,0.0,0.08272688814293566,0.0,0.10249695247809357,0.0,0.14839010616934184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314101239610465
mentalhealth,mestonlab,2020/01/06,"Earn $40: Try a Free Online Writing Treatment for Sexual Distress The Sexual Psychophysiology Lab at the University of Texas at Austin is recruiting women from across the U.S. and Canada who have had unwanted, nonconsensual, or abusive sexual experiences in their childhood or adolescence to participate in a study assessing a novel treatment aimed at reducing sexual distress. Study participation is done entirely online (aside from a phone screen for eligibility) and involves completing questionnaires three times and engaging in expressive writing sessions five times over the course of three weeks. Participants will be compensated $40.00 as a thank you for your time. All data collected is completely confidential. The research study is IRB approved and is being conducted by a student in the Clinical Psychology PhD program at the University of Texas at Austin, and is also overseen by a trained Clinical Psychology Professor. Women (cis- and trans- inclusive) who are over the age of 18 and able to read and write in English may be eligible to participate. **If you are interested in the study, please email the Sexual Psychophysiology Lab for more information about the SEADS Study at** [**mestonlab@utexas.edu**](mailto:mestonlab@utexas.edu)**.**",9.328678733031676,12.858385107692307,9.397375565610863,48.11850678733033,62.02564102564102,12.99849170437406,38.6500754147813,12.000913495891488,6.490061840120664,1036,53,128,41,17,339,117,195,0.063,0.8490000000000001,0.08900000000000001,0.5267,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,3,1,2,2,6,0,2,18,0,16,2,0,0,1,18,17,13,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,2,8,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,3,2,1,4,5,32,10,2,21,0,0,1,0,16,15,0,4,6,89,6,9,0.2449808391719897,0.2902622348555347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959110885767008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5137154978326356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507004540035929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396382688476689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26891539504554657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450471344662687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255454424958028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42855089221472703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663259088331568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965088521673476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tech_Disposable,2020/01/06,"Advice for Someone with no Experience (30M)  

I posted this in [r/dating](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating/) but I feel like posting this here with edits might help.

I'm a 30 year old man, with a stable job, living in a townhome in the American Midwest. I'm fighting this negative feeling, which I think stems from a lack of any meaningful romantic relationship, someone to share my life with. I have caring friends and family, and got a dog over the summer, but I still find my life lacking.

I have no romantic experience, only a handful of second dates, and less than 36 first dates, mostly though a blind dating service over the past 2 years. I'm probably on the shallow end of the spectrum, and I'm nervous about interacting with strangers in public settings (bars, parties, etc). I feel I do alright chatting one on one over dinner, but that might be wishful thinking.

I've noticed how empty my life felt about 3 years ago while traveling for work. When I'm away from friends and family, it's almost like I don't exist. Since then, I've been working gradually to improve myself, losing weight slowly, improving diet, practicing conversation and eye contact, signing up for the dating service. I'd like to say I've come a long way, but I don't know anymore. I feel like regardless of what I do or how much effort I exert, it's all going to amount to nothing. Regardless of this lack of self actualization, I feel like I can't just give up, or else any chance I would have would be lost forever.

I can't find lasting worth or value in doing thing alone, but I have a hard time forming new friendships. I guess I feel utterly trapped by my circumstances and choices I made years ago.

Good news is I am going to see someone to maybe help sort by head out on the 13th (even though it took a month for their next opening)

I guess I'm looking for advice, encouragement, or whatever I can get. I'm already trying to lose weight, so that might help. Thank you in advance.",5.869663120567374,6.6119452925531945,6.368404255319147,77.30833333333334,66.81914893617022,9.032624113475178,32.95390070921986,9.075114841892004,2.8547592198581566,1554,65,284,26,24,505,211,376,0.11800000000000001,0.664,0.217,0.9919,1,2,0,0,2,0,64.0,0,1,1,8,12,18,1,1,17,1,22,12,3,3,1,60,55,24,0,8,10,0,11,5,2,5,4,1,0,2,12,15,5,0,13,3,1,6,7,5,0,4,6,16,31,13,47,42,10,52,0,3,4,0,20,17,0,12,30,173,43,6,0.0,0.0,0.07983669375450225,0.0,0.0,0.1598914455960788,0.14504277311206829,0.0,0.08192288312149304,0.08473254104364797,0.09028155747385293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126990759941263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113550346514818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686505098617928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834127690123129,0.0,0.0,0.07047377910899215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683434137982194,0.0,0.0724611337341601,0.0,0.09124198691395333,0.054036043094245895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16005563545868434,0.15425011272764433,0.0,0.24819958026537145,0.17533949071376956,0.07855233338125538,0.0,0.14954934037665513,0.06958923083013936,0.0,0.0,0.12641547003409664,0.0,0.04274338438118215,0.07848150875145474,0.09299127043858044,0.06862000968278288,0.06543251636291747,0.0,0.18025024537760198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328746713471568,0.0,0.0839626971757198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16451054277273364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118576919611319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04496172621366439,0.06668768533376059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17335866889308554,0.19984601172148786,0.0,0.07224147973360076,0.07240103036135694,0.06870146073105422,0.18305336425930605,0.0893074436223654,0.0,0.0,0.07741247631656391,0.0,0.0,0.08219113306441214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603687555336185,0.0,0.0,0.06530154418991055,0.0,0.06014122081217034,0.0,0.0,0.07901452285243447,0.08700797191218829,0.0,0.0,0.07850080403903986,0.09314348473642288,0.08584791375856403,0.0,0.1108758337983184,0.06222169955693645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780987948621608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567065293250278,0.0,0.08820715474570061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783545231566907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506017246571462,0.0,0.0,0.06519355810919067,0.0,0.08534774065725112,0.0,0.0,0.06767571764650462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079570827713231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533515519574754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753214820342895,0.0,0.0,0.05435224613813405,0.10484363039187414,0.16075971556279758,0.0,0.047705225122325376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908961232147408,0.055544966084812936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649385439628055,0.0,0.1992499097028076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407974274871203,0.0,0.0,0.11912019580148282,0.0,0.0,0.11623377065173518,0.0,0.0,0.2107369386118455
mentalhealth,ChemikalDemolition,2020/01/06,"HELP I don’t know what to do. 

Bit of context first before I vent a bit; 
1) One of the worst triggers for me is sudden, unexpected shouting as it triggers a flashback immediately 
2) I have slowly been trying to move downstairs more in my downtime to be around my mum and siblings more
3) My mum’s boyfriend was staying over for the weekend and at the time of this event was watching a football match and was completely invested in it

Me, chilling, watching my phone quietly at the table. 
Mum’s boyfriend, out of god damn nowhere: “COME OONNN!”

Now I know he was just watching the game and was excited. However. 
His exclamation made me jump and flinch and then I started crying. Ugly crying. Then, as the panic attack sets in I start hyperventilating. 
My younger brother, who is autistic, misreads the situation and thinks I’m about to explode so runs upstairs quickly because me being angry upsets him. 

What I needed, was somebody to hold me, even just squeezing my hand, to keep me rooted there and then, and to take deep breaths and encourage me to follow their rhythm to calm down, but nobody did. 

My mum huffed angrily and stormed into the kitchen as I started... I don’t know how to describe the sound? Almost like wheezing but it’s not wheezing but the noise is kind of similar? It’s a panic noise. Anyway, she claimed I was making a scene so left. 
Cue her boyfriend, who realises he upset me so also leaves the room because he doesn’t know how to handle real emotion as he was always taught to hide it. 

So now, I am hyperventilating, crying, just generally panicking as I start to dissociate as some trauma memories I try to keep buried deep so I don’t feel them all start playing in my head. Simultaneously, all of the same person (who is no longer in our lives but who really messed me up). 

I’m crying and screaming at this point, curled up on the floor alone and nobody, not ONE of the other four people in the house at the time, came to help. 

I don’t know how long this lasted. Eventually I ran out of tears and just started making an ugly noise in my throat as I tried to steady my breathing as rationality kicked in. 

My brother cautiously enters the room as he hears me get quieter and without saying anything, just kneels down and hugs me, refusing to let go until “the mean people in your head go away and let you be happy again”. 

This boy is TEN, I tell you, yet he is more mature than most people ever will be. I love him more than life itself. 

Cut forward a few hours and my mum corners me on the landing, demanding I apologise for ‘making a scene’ with “that stupid screaming and whining”. 

Let me repeat. She wanted ME to apologise to HIM. I bear no ill will towards him, it was an accident, he forgot I was in the room or would have been more careful. My mother, who has a panic disorder herself, wants me to apologise for “my dreadful behaviour”. 

I’m not going to apologise. Ever. I have no reason to. But I have not been able to speak to her for two days since then because every time she’s in my general area she starts having a go at me, nagging about apologising. 

I don’t know what to do. I want to scream, and lash out, and break things, but that’s just my anger talking however  the problem is I can’t calm down. I am in a constant state of anger. And it is exhausting. 

I’m sorry for the long post but I needed to get all of this out. 

Help",3.16211298352102,5.12376788467375,4.407566488299659,84.0546519181109,75.00910470409711,6.870388414130926,26.432420200729442,7.731754440074428,1.5426038442083967,2632,98,510,37,57,865,302,659,0.187,0.726,0.087,-0.9973,2,1,0,0,0,0,81.0,1,3,2,1,28,33,7,6,34,0,49,14,6,11,5,94,96,53,0,7,19,8,3,1,0,3,5,9,4,2,25,31,1,5,10,3,1,13,15,22,0,6,19,15,79,11,92,67,15,96,0,1,3,2,53,45,1,4,36,364,104,1,0.07424275130559105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434339108934263,0.07689309991031103,0.0,0.05937190139591391,0.0617759165490562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061095458432120525,0.06609178903930908,0.0,0.0844618476416856,0.06975350877352815,0.0,0.0,0.13577307629875318,0.0,0.06317511312404288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16210771144340386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491392899897303,0.0756954329760454,0.0,0.0,0.06395355634730086,0.07784211221645825,0.08023003894073841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262087045526569,0.04788043264253428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508862508653448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835131024176567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049036637037279125,0.13431363806726998,0.06255272003856788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03753936580518568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315084633360868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757754660122881,0.0,0.16877546596737053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903278930315256,0.0,0.0,0.15238896374761327,0.0,0.08367697652021147,0.0,0.1492900536903183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731141549726163,0.08566616698405381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198073721755116,0.0,0.07731240070239292,0.24481124701121096,0.06051775136207421,0.0,0.07861235382559438,0.0806649665248832,0.22775472993078966,0.05243985086614236,0.03627125814169014,0.0,0.06555770959309495,0.13140499724462412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700698168383458,0.0702502863999777,0.14867283900268194,0.0,0.0,0.08087212118014048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890829517349589,0.0,0.1101001187332196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061761940434882,0.0,0.0,0.26132361648816066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441172716335372,0.06482590676362826,0.0,0.0,0.07018339736173514,0.0,0.0711040331587622,0.0,0.0,0.07104028629687438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450450479253448,0.04756180758065876,0.07633391345491647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590408157240469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06141437108340781,0.0834519631168247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310868174303397,0.3678458104960885,0.07913289457937303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582130935740208,0.05967351123399778,0.06489143702281286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04932358502616467,0.04757175724571554,0.0,0.0,0.12987463599204194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121786414292382,0.0,0.07252438013186986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137089485018738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156736289983114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273992039889415,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sgledis,2020/01/06,What are the early signs of schizophrenia? Last night i heard a weird sound on the outside of my house and i stayed wake all night thinking that someone is going to rob or kill me. During that time i made up a lot of scenarios in my head on what would happen if he came in.,3.3781578947368414,4.198125719298247,3.837675438596492,92.92914473684212,72.50877192982456,6.401754385964912,23.021929824561404,5.985473137389443,0.231108771929824,214,5,48,1,4,67,45,57,0.16899999999999998,0.831,0.0,-0.875,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,4,0,3,2,2,1,1,10,9,3,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,3,2,6,0,9,5,2,13,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,3,5,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959410928754041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470536001506399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288117895327809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655521715063052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985627844403993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862685618539555,0.0,0.0,0.210915802478894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21998001534422926,0.0,0.2448355267163645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4856387340587573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21923805359447465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27579309519992923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657965659493951,0.0,0.0,0.15087921838573365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18380859141730824,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,donbrian_,2020/01/06,"I don’t know what to do. (21M) Hello! 

Apologies in advance due to being on my phone and just trying to get these thoughts off before i forge (long read incoming)
 
Originally posted in r/depression.

I’m not here looking for pats on the back or empathy really, but more so answers. I’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety throughout my entire (short) life so far, and my entire life has been filled with sadness and emptiness. On top of that i come from a dysfunctional family where my father is out of the picture and my mother relies on my emotionally and financially. I left my home at 19 to join the military and create a life for myself and hopefully start over and find out who i am and what i am. I’ve always been referred to as a bright child, level headed, and determined. But I’ve never been able to see these qualities in myself. I’ve never experienced a period of happiness and am not sure what it’s like to live as a “functioning” human being. I wake up everyday with a genuine hatred for myself and the life i am living, going on as a zombie and coming home to reset and start over the next day. Despite this I take all the recommended steps to counter these feelings and state of mind. I spend my free time researching and discovering ways to better myself and relieve myself of some of the pain i deal with but to no avail. 

I have am in a LTR with my wonderful and successful girlfriend who’s on her way to having the world in her hands. I have my own apartment, a job that I hate but pays the bills at the end of the day even though i work an inhumane amount of hours, and I can pay my bills and have been able to afford a car. I take of my finances very well and have high credit and all of the other snazzy things. I also see a therapist and Psychiatrist which has diagnosed me with clinical depression and anxiety and am currently on my third bout of meds with Bupropion(300mg) and Buspar(20mg) though they do nothing. I exercise sort of regularly with the little free time I have and always try to remain efficient and maximize my free time, taking part time classes online and handling my responsibilities as a young adult now. Despite that I hate myself.  I hate looking at myself (haven’t looked in a mirror in months), i don’t know who I am and i spend the day driving myself crazy internally. Nothing seems to work for me and I’m tired of initiating paths and goals for them to fail and collapse in front of me. I took 5 classes at a university nearby this past fall while working and got into a car accident because i was just frankly doing way too much. But i just wanted to feel like I was doing something for myself. I try to eat a healthy diet and follow proper regimes but I can’t seem to get the results I want (and have wasted a lot of money throughout the process) and I honestly just don’t know what to do. I don’t know where I am, where I’m going, and what’s going to happen to me. I don’t have many “friends” and many do not know of me and my personal battles and struggles. I speak to my leadership for advice but it just doesn’t click. I feel alone and fading and I don’t have much to build off of in this New Year. To sum it up I’m just asking for assistance and Advice in what i can do/what routes to take to get better and maybe function and be content with my life one day. Any help is appreciated and if you’ve read all this i thank you. 

TLDR; High functioning depressed young male, proactive and willing to do the work to get better but nothing has worked to actually help me get better. Do not know what to do or where to go. Medicated, , in talk therapy, healthy eater, exercise moderately, and nothing seems to work.",5.3743209876543245,5.7228462674897145,6.331840877914952,78.52039506172841,67.80658436213992,9.442962962962962,29.91742112482853,9.3871,2.498303923182441,2895,100,568,54,45,964,313,729,0.115,0.7340000000000001,0.15,0.98,3,1,1,0,0,0,67.0,0,1,2,15,21,31,4,1,35,0,53,17,3,2,6,117,105,71,0,4,21,2,4,2,2,1,12,1,2,5,26,64,2,0,17,4,12,16,16,11,1,2,10,13,79,23,103,91,11,97,0,5,7,0,27,45,0,11,33,398,105,19,0.12504160724246496,0.0,0.061011285599975686,0.0,0.0,0.12218921142015868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475269726377084,0.0,0.049997864067755415,0.10404463410003853,0.0,0.0,0.04251629039214711,0.0,0.09565648728655607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058448511697742525,0.0,0.0,0.04807463880583352,0.0,0.03811210159038427,0.0,0.053200599006895694,0.0,0.0,0.2211782804150598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771227269881392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16128298447463918,0.1289124065084323,0.21539630618534625,0.06345729962297365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397439044025582,0.0,0.07032748900377814,0.05537487485074572,0.0,0.0,0.04129440114408185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05893904944506821,0.0,0.09483719055256283,0.04466487459925573,0.0,0.0,0.05714288184994847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04830341778820525,0.0,0.16332269720543008,0.0,0.14212805396172504,0.0,0.05000359804000415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05528694016413111,0.06655455802442135,0.0,0.18517904956204173,0.06416438176766594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381275357066624,0.13211332331228914,0.12542692733366842,0.06209726496437571,0.06157039771007325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062042250475815075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061587916597632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792903606787158,0.0,0.22080146278751264,0.061089013203120976,0.06266227003291934,0.11041403006353867,0.05532894378983667,0.15750518632523489,0.0,0.0,0.053152951473676775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12677256368755024,0.06281055060469191,0.0,0.06944651851692497,0.06298313212625409,0.0,0.0,0.06312818897976591,0.0,0.049903508967208285,0.0,0.0919199687949403,0.0,0.09643979607595844,0.06038298172917295,0.0664915839342335,0.0,0.0,0.2399615890798832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04236571458486255,0.0,0.0665265430973998,0.0,0.0,0.0677039377139586,0.05968318143285459,0.0,0.054590754182245786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059877647522766225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12507544527721606,0.0,0.04005242773643381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964197178078,0.17074977449881076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04813156911772872,0.0,0.0,0.08850509319183716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536031866672996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05892511750969304,0.0,0.1880314540526129,0.05025185370479696,0.0,0.05756075603955382,0.07149798768294346,0.07259147179476902,0.04153604384383548,0.0,0.12285274424480518,0.04963453443372536,0.14582553348209978,0.07185846658085293,0.0,0.0,0.06946291326189083,0.12734256505644848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051586210695760915,0.07375277966793788,0.14887831143199895,0.0,0.0,0.05621371090215506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780114456830044,0.2730953379326074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04026134770700841
mentalhealth,Bravemouse91,2020/01/06,"Anxiety over looking for new work. After being fired from mentally abusive job i'm looking for new work and it's causing me a lot of stress and anxiety. My last job had me doubting my self worth and my depression was at it's lowest point, i had gained 10 pounds from it and my boyfriend noticed how badly it affected me. Now that i'm looking for new work i'm starting to come up with scenarios in my head and i'm extremely anxious i'm going to go back to the way it was with my last job.

I'm unsure of what to do.",0.9541818181818194,2.942463509090913,3.2209090909090925,89.78136363636364,82.0909090909091,6.545454545454546,25.45454545454545,7.686295010490155,1.4168181818181815,406,17,88,7,11,139,63,110,0.259,0.7040000000000001,0.037000000000000005,-0.9756,4,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,4,3,4,0,2,2,0,6,1,1,3,0,13,19,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,4,0,0,4,4,10,0,18,14,1,18,0,1,3,0,1,5,0,2,9,52,17,6,0.0,0.1680904029577811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170572909949028,0.16027047926921145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908774888934504,0.1184538692396324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457375338801891,0.0,0.12220673569619285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219071606414394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612537280137255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559751544221408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42234635195725945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23128273916373224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3574002143627509,0.0,0.0,0.1206111156967113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429695944791852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110510476011711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16151767884339285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411113285193293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14799928308991547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041491336558588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250933535284245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260822931440585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098448203382875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prestoric_user,2020/01/06,"I feel like people dont like me. I have this feeling very often almost daily , i feel like i annoy people and they dont really feel comfortable when im around, i feel this even with my family, this makes me sad and angry wich leads me to be on defensive mode and that makes me feel like nobody cares about me.
I dont want to feel like this
Is this caused by an mental illness? I've had this feeling a really big part of my life.",2.4090109890109868,3.5688567142857166,4.1327472527472535,88.58725274725279,75.26373626373626,7.397802197802199,18.494505494505496,7.957251820313856,0.4153032967032973,335,5,74,5,7,113,54,91,0.161,0.64,0.19899999999999998,0.1828,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,1,5,10,2,0,2,0,7,2,0,4,0,21,19,4,0,1,0,0,8,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,8,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,8,14,7,8,17,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,2,6,45,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114420771026622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658810800408548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335292544430638,0.13453885247132508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.460475905923929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650225418560109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234637262026423,0.0,0.5297654911168209,0.3742504774215896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14146648385159555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250563625783574,0.3199185120524045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17484254613039604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198360550915694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14182414727518788,0.0,0.18159160550600487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16780121221367816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806122346966657,0.07724753861268817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ShroomPortabello,2020/01/06,"My mental health is declining due to my lack of social life I’m 17 and started college this year. I didn’t keep any friends from high school and don’t have a connected family.

I’m noticing I’m starting to feel worse so my question is that how do you make friends in my situation? I don’t have any problems socially, just need to know how I should go about this.",1.3439000000000014,3.6218473066666697,2.855583333333332,91.287375,82.6,6.416666666666668,25.375,7.645422480735847,1.3545000000000005,288,12,62,5,8,94,52,75,0.109,0.8079999999999999,0.083,-0.2263,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,3,0,14,20,5,0,4,1,0,1,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,1,8,2,7,18,1,7,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,4,35,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724445900521639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18884085389410785,0.0,0.10128619431703867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3095285297951741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384465530554053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21292739408759728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21164570026136226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17805077828560806,0.0,0.0,0.110088876054608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414896818542124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371302132130738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20187222215749767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485323710343746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228062007622074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916761268569248,0.0,0.0,0.2244006637343306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027312987870244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22516447923639185,0.0,0.4083955078282906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835705280232108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20413993554581414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899745332684934
mentalhealth,mavedatthews41,2020/01/06,"I’ve been through hospital treatment and a partial program last year because I wanted to end my life. I think the treatment really saved me but I still have set backs. I had a stupid tiff with my boyfriend and it upset me so much that I’m thinking I don’t deserve life. My boyfriend is incredibly supportive and wonderful, but like everyone, he can get snappy or rude and it just set me off tonight for some reason. I don’t think I even want to talk to anyone, but I just felt like I needed to get it out there anyway that I’m feeling this way. I should talk to my boyfriend, but in the past year whenever he has seen me cry, he panics and thinks I need my therapist on speed dial. I don’t. But I feel like I have to tiptoe around my emotions as to not alarm him, so then I feel a little crazy which makes me reflect on myself and spiral and tell myself I’m a piece of shit. But I really fucking feel miserable right now.",6.0175789473684205,5.047297705263155,6.47684210526316,82.46789473684213,66.68421052631578,9.705263157894738,31.63157894736842,8.841846274778883,2.290905263157895,724,24,155,10,10,236,111,190,0.166,0.7070000000000001,0.128,-0.8942,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,0,11,13,4,4,6,0,11,4,1,2,0,40,34,18,0,5,10,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,10,0,0,12,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,4,6,30,5,18,29,3,22,0,1,1,1,7,8,2,3,14,101,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007834801545044,0.0,0.0,0.1283119011381844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083194833337208,0.0,0.08786417494267558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583270011955682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16213398210153002,0.12766201516796574,0.0,0.0,0.0952006930835862,0.0,0.0,0.1377284495463809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915186569466469,0.1029710299830806,0.13839348984501731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13325172360208995,0.1506105771190337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749035459241773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036155188970788,0.21125320511747936,0.14446247849703242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621212608169984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059567943238483,0.21375053929614315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691129388955243,0.0,0.0,0.13759444574619978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18467486024967905,0.1481961632312981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230916466776704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14795388155317335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11510746718649305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16356421036004049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23170266035531434,0.1259815140884394,0.0,0.0,0.16735339986423398,0.0,0.36942698640228977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700306953654655,0.11440871757237045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563097121142703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18563815432571168
mentalhealth,NovaSpektor,2020/01/06,"My sister heard a voice inside her head telling her to kill herself and tried to do so in a psychosis state I have 5 sisters. We had a rough time growing up, but I always thought that for the most part, we all made it out alright and are mostly sane. 

A few days ago, I got a phone call from my mom. She told me that my sister went to her house at 2AM and when my mom answered the door, she was dressed in just a robe and sobbing. She was saying that she needed help. My mom let her inside and my sister was speaking nonsense and acting very strange. My mom simply thought that she was overtired because my sister had mentioned how she hadn't slept in 3 days earlier that day. 

My sister went to let my mom's dog outside and when my mom realized that she had been gone for awhile, she went outside to see what was going on. She found my sister naked in the snow, just lying there. She brought my sister inside and my sister told her that she wanted to take a bath. Their hot water heater isn't working, so my mom told her that and my sister said it was fine. My mom thought that maybe she just had a temperature and that's why she wanted to take a cold bath, so she let her. Something inside of my mom told her to check on her and when she did, my sister's mouth was half underwater and when my mom pulled her out, water poured out of her mouth.

My mom helped her get dressed and tried to get her to go to sleep, because again, she just thought that she needed sleep. When my mom turned off the lights and went to lay down next to her, my sister got on top of her and started biting my mom. Some time passed and she gave my sister a sleeping pill and when she thought she was asleep, she tried to get some rest too.

My mom soon realized that something was seriously wrong and she had to get my sister some help (I don't know why she didn't think of this right away). She called an ambulance and my sister was taken to the ER. 

When my mom told me about all of this, I thought my sister had taken or been given some sort of drug. I arrived at the hospital and that's when my mom told me that the CT scan and drug tests came back normal. There was no injury to her brain and she had been on no drugs. This scared me a lot. She was so out of it. She was quoting Bible verses and staring off into the distance and just acting very scary, but it was all her.

​

She was taken to a psychiatric hospital and I saw her yesterday during visiting hours. She was her normal self again. She explained that while all of this was happening, there was a voice commanding her to kill herself and after my mom had saved her the first time, the voice said that everyone has a second death and told her to drown herself in the bathtub. The biting incident was because my sister thought that the zombie apocalypse was occurring and she was one of the zombies. When my mom thought she was asleep, she was actually outside wandering. The voice she was hearing told her that if she went to sleep, she would die. 

I know I'm not the one that this happened to, but I just feel so scared and anxious and sad. I'm scared that this could happen again. They diagnosed her as having psychosis due to a lack of sleep, but what if she is bipolar or schizophrenic and that doesn't get diagnosed and this happens again and she actually succeeds in killing herself? Also, the whole voice telling her to hurt herself is freaking me out and I  can't stop imagining my mom finding my sister's dead body out in her yard or bathtub. I feel like I've failed to protect my sister and I feel like no one that I love is safe.",4.585180145762315,5.14005015055249,4.727604325849303,88.60465322675445,69.5939226519337,7.542917597272835,27.144586810861643,7.295548434001253,1.1815307158810389,2815,85,600,25,47,878,259,724,0.13699999999999998,0.8059999999999999,0.057,-0.9971,0,0,5,0,0,0,64.0,2,0,2,5,33,21,3,3,33,1,55,24,13,2,4,108,124,62,7,11,16,38,5,2,0,1,8,11,4,1,35,45,2,3,21,3,1,16,10,13,1,6,76,22,128,8,66,43,16,75,0,4,4,1,139,27,1,13,33,420,163,4,0.0,0.0,0.06857415667666313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031145408772779288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028097763638028732,0.029235464266896924,0.038069187091035316,0.042693352130018326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039692996800310985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033010861305793435,0.027016950890529433,0.0,0.06425463420501061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0390275044575548,0.0,0.039222722119756935,0.07175433576290183,0.04018553306351915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028052754863462884,0.0,0.0,0.06797827158870838,0.0,0.0,0.07132337507448762,0.03646499408019827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223771448657908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033573376752621065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05329653604060911,0.05020146811517268,0.0,0.0,0.032113115585094124,0.029886150049176743,0.0,0.03852414839712432,0.0,0.0,0.09178397174296583,0.0,0.039936510699114205,0.0,0.056201972023246415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428045925293328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036059053051644786,0.0,0.039600145067471115,0.0,0.07065154632874653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03460128775926585,0.04054152983315944,0.03761316830754431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661633042226592,0.0,0.0386189897506268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10778496929658403,0.0,0.034330759640764145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0298708573859689,0.03171106683774959,0.033245961412080416,0.0,0.0,0.03529822798976832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7818528759995004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052104902149854485,0.0,0.0,0.037366892449054064,0.0,0.06885045662790659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142596130597634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038048210152990855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030005436368600563,0.06684361540043066,0.02794107728079009,0.10552998301291368,0.0,0.027998361767308737,0.0,0.03665388096998631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175803852758107,0.0,0.0,0.05409788909240892,0.0,0.0,0.02486901426324858,0.0,0.0,0.02937476447264415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05283489055977948,0.0,0.061419769848385077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022513343172596918,0.0,0.22314863929586629,0.06146319620699495,0.0,0.0,0.2685870140209685,0.0,0.07156388299243234,0.03821722167029802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05798076306406948,0.04144753399763308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16285432136694908,0.06340846019802474,0.03922741508734049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025578986885917417,0.0,0.0,0.02495917736868308,0.03841504008543794,0.042693352130018326,0.0
mentalhealth,Andy_Reefs,2020/01/06,"Why is everyone dying in my dreams from suicide? I can’t seem to get a dream without it having a very visually gore suicide of people I know. Most of the times friends and family. I can’t control my dreams but I want it to stop. My dreams that don’t involve suicide are just realistic representations of things that happened to me irl that make me hate myself. 

Most nights I’m scared to go to sleep and have had thoughts myself. What do I do?",1.5953932584269666,4.063857808988768,2.9956067415730345,89.43745505617979,83.26966292134831,5.807191011235956,23.50674157303371,7.1686216300943375,0.9492597752808988,351,13,72,5,10,114,59,89,0.23600000000000002,0.644,0.12,-0.9513,0,0,0,0,0,3,7.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,1,3,0,10,1,1,2,0,14,20,3,4,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,3,4,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,0,12,1,11,18,2,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,3,3,49,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21318537956459774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972679378725544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816248971504537,0.0,0.0,0.17918588172609334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468515455925403,0.0,0.09930639119626164,0.0,0.10802405581244276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16808277728470472,0.0,0.0,0.1876598032792044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446030039210197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687660074420984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17837259903500213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177413701755755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19029832727517967,0.0,0.0,0.1730372262315765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19021236327294297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891128900956555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6237339049476737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262774461014676,0.0,0.0,0.1508983924971566,0.11083431545465164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683185825796192,0.11211121471229936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715132074261161,0.0,0.0,0.18322560710892286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DelusionalNarc,2020/01/06,No empathy for other people? Am a teenager. I think when I was younger like really young I did feel some empathy but as I’ve gotten older I think I would go as far as saying I’m completely or nearly devoid of empathy. I’m also a selfish piece of shit. I was talking to one of my relatives earlier and her close friend had died and I wanted the conversation to move to something else really quickly and I was getting ancy because I just didn’t give a fuck. That was just a quick example and the most recent. Can depression cause a lack of empathy?,2.6530909090909103,4.708128127272733,5.112727272727274,77.99909090909094,76.81818181818181,8.763636363636364,27.363636363636363,9.3871,2.8192909090909084,434,18,80,12,10,153,73,110,0.24600000000000002,0.703,0.051,-0.9776,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,2,0,7,0,10,2,1,1,0,18,21,11,1,3,4,0,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,4,0,1,8,2,11,2,12,12,4,11,0,1,0,1,6,3,2,3,7,60,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822675485667729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138937921791886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23413663233248416,0.0,0.0,0.2389697927028145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963071694699677,0.0,0.2365449850430132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903979211647055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152432046000371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17609043329774535,0.21070837533659104,0.11907879746465133,0.21864164058682034,0.12953219333061716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135020353876443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422428991611551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544444964728498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801103618780632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29202278752446503,0.0,0.22504351206048534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18125113891240846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339566135737596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17546395781771745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18319346949095866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920838770640055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13443312630158785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190783479564874,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,holdnarrytight,2020/01/06,"Anyone else actually kind of enjoys feeling like a victim and punishing yourself with hateful thoughts about yourself? I'm not afraid or embarrassed to admit this because I know it's a behavior that I have and that I need help to fix it. I have gotten so used to criticising and pittying myself and crying and listening to sad music I feel like self loathing is part of my identity, and actually feel kind of better when I engage in these negative thoughts and put myself down. Anyone can relate? It's really weird and embarrassing, but it's healthy to admit things about yourself even if you're not proud of them.",8.549681159420288,8.117823113043478,8.61021739130435,67.46952898550725,61.34782608695652,11.84057971014493,37.42753623188406,11.20814326018867,4.357144927536232,498,21,83,12,6,163,75,115,0.191,0.642,0.16699999999999998,-0.6173,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,2,5,16,3,3,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,24,18,13,0,2,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,9,9,0,0,8,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,3,4,10,8,14,15,1,4,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,2,3,57,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.3586706293853924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25699581523136905,0.18829650088777827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120259254513118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162531719055597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20186530909140488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15351822632291373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137991113275776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27876248213858035,0.2625740225992068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814371598146665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231787397122379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.382741268312608,0.10099648345219253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17956378560645075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362648769876348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990075582979079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18474198090530114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177292801108045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917146516130072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12209019070115827,0.0,0.0,0.291789453861341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872031542148254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Just-A-Vet-2008,2020/01/06,"Feels like my fear is in the driver seat and has control of my life. Let me start off by saying this is my very first reddit post. If I messed up some lingo or said something that isn’t right please forgive me.

I’m a 34 y/o male veteran dealing with major depression, major anxiety, ADHD, and possible a few other things that have yet to be diagnosed (very slow process with VA). I am not on any medication at this point in time because they don’t seem to work (and I’ve been prescribed so many different meds I could start a very small pharmacy).

I’m not sure when it originally started but lately it feels like I’ve been having more and more moments of bad anxiety and fear. My fear seems to from not knowing something or feeling of helplessness or that something is happening that I have no control over. What’s worse is when these moments do hit my mind wants to start giving in to my vices (in this case pornography). Problem with that is because I’m Catholic I feel like shit when all is said and done, which escalates my stress even more.

I’ve been admitted to a mental hospital, I’ve seen so many counselors/therapists and psychiatrists/psychologists that I get left with the feeling that no one can help me.

I haven’t felt like I’ve had peace in my life for a very long time and I’m worried that I never will.

I’ll stop venting now.",5.227660277594183,5.790721865168543,5.649900859220092,82.5294844679445,68.17602996254682,9.128794888742013,31.06168759638687,9.168548406835145,2.4864916942057715,1066,41,215,19,17,342,152,267,0.182,0.703,0.115,-0.9709,1,0,3,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,4,8,16,1,4,7,0,25,5,1,3,3,43,51,18,0,4,8,0,6,4,0,1,4,3,0,1,18,12,0,3,11,0,0,0,9,10,0,2,9,10,20,6,26,37,8,35,0,2,1,0,10,14,1,7,24,131,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376305567348967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437212009830283,0.0,0.14482944845369894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903723699189356,0.11540784758719574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123387225299748,0.07557839440857854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975904157839553,0.0815306131050354,0.09607801797304824,0.0,0.09889966644308963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968701567118808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252210918018639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195568188317166,0.23931497643715696,0.20287560217694667,0.09088854924953288,0.0,0.0,0.08051784028928043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04945599995821158,0.09080660199759737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370762169717604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06344867565888225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052022720286114314,0.0,0.10678072596465038,0.0,0.10284848531212948,0.09679637478817618,0.13372246872284962,0.1849845910039434,0.0,0.0,0.08377121761331885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919409859043587,0.0,0.0,0.10514604141489743,0.09536010098725256,0.0953951254950272,0.0,0.09557972544435406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300771160886692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641441396263233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390837369574964,0.08948439977951403,0.1067150498633436,0.09065821787338442,0.0,0.0,0.09057694010843867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083921580269579,0.18008688105740867,0.0752775179908819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723500159494276,0.0,0.0,0.09716724150293768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186219295608021,0.0,0.0,0.2680036492228272,0.0,0.0,0.07914008965529981,0.1084328349434808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921603239969335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990768238210473,0.062887970188895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039414149408758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124180138667245,0.05583298479922258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06891368668941789,0.09613193551817928,0.0964667380277135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EconomyIndependence2,2020/01/06,"Losing steam as the year starts Hey guys. I'm not sure if this the right place to discuss about this... so here goes...

It is 6 Jan today, 6 days into the new year. I found it very strange initially that I entered the new year with an abnormal insane amount of positivity, that it'd attribute it to an enjoyable overseas, and also a really nice movie with winter(my fav season) with its really beautiful artwork and musical-ish songs.  Everything seemed nice and rosy since 30 Dec till 4 Jan. I was kinda happy and positive. 

From yesterday 5 Jan, I started feeling odd. I kept thinking ""I don't feel like myself ??"". My friends also tell me ""hey dude you give off much more positive vibes than before, wassup ?"" . 

I have half expected this is simply just like a temporary +5 happiness buff that will go off suddenly, plunging me back into where I came from. And because of the stark contrast it's going to be a big oof. 

So now 6 jan,I feel strange and detached. It feels like a withdrawal symptom. It also feels as if I ""drugged"" myself hard and now as the holiday season faded, I come to crash and burn.

Also I should include some background. I'm 24m, undergrad student. Was oscillating on and off suicidal, have felt stupid ugly worthless most of the time. 

Has anyone had a similar kind of experience ? Where a momentarily period of cloud nine high stops, and you fall to the ground ?? 
Apologies if this is the wrong sub.

PSA: I'm not on any medication nor any kind of drugs.",4.0352422360248426,5.960199257142861,5.172111801242238,79.66419254658386,72.5,8.58385093167702,28.60248447204969,9.20300075937882,2.6005139751552795,1152,46,213,26,23,380,177,280,0.147,0.7170000000000001,0.135,0.4837,0,0,2,0,0,0,52.0,0,2,0,1,14,16,1,0,17,0,14,4,0,1,1,41,34,24,1,5,6,0,7,3,1,2,4,1,0,1,15,17,0,2,9,2,0,6,4,4,0,2,7,8,18,12,29,23,5,41,0,2,0,0,10,14,0,7,24,127,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3655949815571571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15544406437774425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991516415584002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788298768007119,0.0,0.06967094163842029,0.0,0.09725351460213348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071884837960487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098451871607548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370846089367764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650833446451779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271768918550477,0.11179886385738234,0.0,0.0,0.2889456844597274,0.1632995159877108,0.10973761217720597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531455798576113,0.08830120778507164,0.0,0.0,0.10963867016717127,0.129908807695453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316639803872695,0.0,0.24333051888485824,0.10238259386701147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075507849284473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23803369139594485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675109307550159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786277778232125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151365036159613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401728734546451,0.0,0.0,0.22076658176564176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194101273504768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643592134033198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760418210780593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404654582541242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454297965741132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16179200110096226,0.0,0.0,0.09555268004574556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250161785748714,0.0,0.10771823782319764,0.11879246634060325,0.0,0.0,0.09989567103204404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323327745945271,0.0,0.0,0.06664420097989432,0.0,0.10833482905408692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430232720723007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495964138356645,0.0,0.22079963234723693
mentalhealth,Raiidz,2020/01/06,"Sleeping question I’m 14 and I’m gonna be honest, my sleep cycle is messed up but I’ve kind of adapted to it. I wake up for school at 7:30 and sleep between 12 and 2am. When it’s pitch black and silent in the middle of the night my mind makes images and makes me think that “thing” is in my room so immediately I turn on my light. That happens quite a lot during the night and it’s a pain because it makes it so hard to go to sleep and get energised for the next day. Any tips someone could give?",1.3482161060142699,2.6323778073394517,2.8819571865443443,95.97158002038736,78.26605504587157,5.5783893985728845,20.367991845056068,5.82211442006289,-0.2740589194699292,387,9,95,2,9,127,72,109,0.078,0.863,0.057999999999999996,-0.2845,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,6,0,4,6,5,3,0,16,16,11,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,8,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,7,2,14,13,1,14,0,0,1,0,2,8,0,2,5,51,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779626586397044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662983759351068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656206887077415,0.0,0.0,0.1022296589930975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828180291704334,0.15206292096933485,0.0900882541155135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14017511042870484,0.0,0.14199913457630134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16506994451679638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476457225368546,0.0,0.0,0.31743183580338263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600558981041939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16858348631504805,0.2975129179931963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16867212215821073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17757411592078853,0.16860120010215834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16042658053008044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6345216198213308,0.0,0.13431003024595894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531093808585468,0.10157060520400732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17241980919975972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,callistas,2020/01/06,"Hysterical episodes. What is going on with me?!? Hi guys.

I'm slowly realizing that I've been surpressing my mental problems over a long period of time. I don't understand it at all, and it feels all too complicated. My boyfriend have now helped me to talk to my parents and to find a psychologist. Now that I understand a bit more about what's happpening, I'm interested in finding some insight. Do any of you have similar experiences and/or advice?

I very often feel down. I worry about things a lot and can sometimes have a paranoid behaviour. I don't know if I'm depressed, because I'm happy a lot of times. My mood changes A LOT. When I discuss or argue with someone I can take things in the worse manner (I think the worst about what the other person might think) and can be rude. Then I can even become angry and hysterical.

When all of this happen I call it ""episodes"" and well.. They hadn't happened for years until I met my boyfriend for over a year ago. I don't know why they came back, but it was around a stressful time of my life. I'm not focusing on the WHY here, but if anyone wonder: Yes, a lot of bad things have happened in my life.

When I actually remembered these episodes happening I've asked my mom about it, because it has happened several times over the years.. I surpress it so well that I forget it when it's not happening. It's happened when I was a young kid, jr high school, and now it's happening again in university. 

I've talked to professionals about it earlier, but my mom says that I did so well socially and at school they didn't take it seriously. I did tell them what was happening and everything. I even thought I had a personality disorder at a time. When it goes well with me again I forget about it, my mind tries to convince me that I'm normal.

The episodes: 

It has only been vitnessed by really close family, like my mom and dad and my boyfriend. My mom says that it's not just anger issues, but that I have problems with my emotions and how to express them. If the feelings become too strong and get gathered up I have difficulties and they can come out this way. I do all of the fight, flight and freeze reactions.

Firstly I become paranoid, and takes things literally or in the worst way. Then I can easily become angry. If I become angry I can say anything I can think of that would make me be in the right or hurt the person that is ""hurting me"".. I can even throw things and be physically angry (I've never hurt anyone physically!). Well I become hysteric. I then try to escape. I can fight back, be quiet for hours or run away. If I am able to escape I usually run away in anger. I don't think straight and can do impulsive things. I once tried to jump out of a moving car.

When the ""episode"" is done I become really sad and cry. A lot. I could cry for hours. I have bad consious about everything. I apologise. Very often I seriously forget the whole episode. I don't remember what I've said, and even forget why I was angry in the first place. It's really scary, and I still don't know how to control it. I try as good as I can. The only reason I even remember this is because my boyfriend and I have logged it, and has taken it up often lately even thought I felt like it made it worse. In the end I agreed and talked to my parents and my memory has somewhat come back of some of the situation.

Usually I'm just normal. I'm nice and happy, and usually do good at school. Unfortunately I feel like it's consuming too much space in my life, and is hurting me and my family. I'm TIRED. It started by happening once or twice a month to being 3 days in a week, and then not for two months and so on. I am now looking for a good psychologist and get good support from my parents and boyfriend. I am still at the beginning of my journey to figure things out.

Does anyone of you have similar troubles? I am happy to hear similar experiences, advice or questions. Thank you.",3.067909977346595,4.819490450704227,4.522120358514727,84.04194543484684,74.71062740076825,7.9303535900719,25.971850684526743,8.663278654923907,1.8386201950162515,3066,109,625,61,65,1021,277,781,0.16699999999999998,0.7140000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.9917,3,0,0,0,2,0,102.0,0,3,6,4,51,44,6,1,36,1,64,4,0,6,5,126,121,67,0,11,21,8,6,3,0,2,4,6,0,5,51,45,0,1,27,0,0,11,13,22,5,4,20,13,92,21,81,93,18,101,0,6,1,0,44,37,0,25,54,445,143,4,0.043143191383816136,0.0,0.04210153131042763,0.0,0.0,0.0843180545994645,0.03824383605054178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0293388495840666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905001676341862,0.0,0.03550317047073738,0.03840658721933679,0.04033306004113087,0.0,0.08106889698422028,0.09952335331164236,0.07204552542635694,0.07889906708084847,0.3335378570651791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047101191002525016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04405402210084825,0.04934431746575885,0.0,0.0,0.045639775901048535,0.07432807843584009,0.0,0.0,0.04838875767697475,0.034446327726543324,0.0,0.094781539773851,0.027823789295389558,0.0,0.03715916752054322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04944583507666535,0.0,0.0377548975168137,0.04415046378175387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04853028339198773,0.03821206198842353,0.0,0.0,0.17097402609529147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775486370534687,0.08440463940547613,0.08134312238191455,0.0,0.08725797548605896,0.030821504545015494,0.041424229484347486,0.0,0.07886419063998976,0.07339515310272894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04508107365697369,0.0,0.02451926989865831,0.14474584807157598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042718542432864826,0.3815138165813101,0.13778018841736872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048625512241202526,0.0,0.028917971765128368,0.04558315042257696,0.0,0.0,0.08497470595791425,0.0,0.1847427147403332,0.0,0.0,0.0450302828516857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711311090778499,0.0,0.04866739906608899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141993591041844,0.06323275219008045,0.0,0.0,0.03818036673761923,0.03622941487199901,0.0,0.0,0.1833939924969828,0.0,0.04082313084609365,0.028798415261068737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043478189527977815,0.04576810819622875,0.04356232455628285,0.20211513727356129,0.06887296750501397,0.04585438471195792,0.03171520978632888,0.0,0.03327468888858194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454233477853403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189218156463742,0.0,0.06562468230810603,0.0,0.0,0.14371622513776192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301291181764225,0.045075452435885614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256441507809074,0.0,0.0,0.04833024813306578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291589943507666,0.04435838623094117,0.0,0.0,0.1466184767260091,0.03684404971138618,0.041039054697425636,0.1029275922879498,0.0,0.13098963895644578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0487395260425189,0.0,0.0,0.048494754744268176,0.0,0.04397905046559592,0.036555086054559593,0.0,0.04266971944714136,0.0,0.030536972918252463,0.0,0.06890841673889563,0.0,0.0494203799645334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048958382312405783,0.0,0.0,0.0973149320526423,0.10403058899780247,0.0377090508825908,0.03972045415565096,0.0,0.0,0.200636935157823,0.11057765997213446,0.0,0.06850174963501571,0.1257857092212888,0.049586751875857926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716557982460367,0.0,0.04214462903109386,0.08982716751383334,0.0,0.0,0.14254839025531665,0.07119530242433574,0.0,0.06849011434042401,0.03460686577090988,0.0,0.1939545517152118,0.0,0.116790059189236,0.04816783244784258,0.0,0.0,0.046786950690418966,0.0,0.04381400507061146,0.0879331956921289,0.03064768532043028,0.0,0.0,0.08334840223825593
mentalhealth,obserris,2020/01/06,"Emotional detachment help? I’ve been diagnosed with major depressive, generalized anxiety, & OCD for possible backstory here. Not sure if that may contribute to my emotional problems, but I digress. 

Anyway, like the title says I am completely emotionally detached from most anything and everyone. It’s been this way... since I can remember. I never attempted to make friends, though people often gravitate to me. 

I am well liked by everyone. I have a high emotional intelligence and it is easy for me to tell people what they need or want to be hearing at the time. Hence, I have many people who consider me friends but I do not care about them. This treatment extends to my family. I do not need them at all to be a happy person, which is nice in a sense, but it does give odd vibes not liking anyone or having people I consider truly close whilst nearly everyone likes me. I think I may be feeling as if it’s polite to reciprocate their feelings, though I’m not sure. It’s possible that’s more of a societal thing I feel the need to conform to, though. 

My lack of emotions has caused “problems”, mainly because I enjoy testing the boundaries of my emotional range. I slept with one of my good “friends” boyfriends and managed to convince her he was the terrible person. I felt nothing for the aforementioned boyfriend, and I felt nothing for her. I’ve cheated on multiple boyfriends and managed to convince them it was their fault. I’ve turned friends against each other, just because I could. The list could go on. 

I feel like I’ve mastered subtle emotional manipulation. Nobody ever seemed to realize, I’m still well liked by all involved parties. I’ve even told people who think they’re my friend about all of this behavior, and they think they’re special because I’m not doing it to them. Even though I am, by manipulating them into thinking they’re special. I felt nothing doing any of this, no guilt, no excitement, nothing. I originally started doing it to see if I would feel any emotions at all, and I think I got swept away by the power trip. 

I told my therapist about this and she thought my emotional detachment may disappear once I got on medication, however I’ve been on medication for a while now and I still feel exactly the same. 

Is there something wrong with me? How would I go about changing this? Should I even want to change this? I’m not lonely or anything, and I have the most fun on my own... I’m just unsure of what to do I suppose.",4.549902239399792,6.5983149308855324,5.3199414573149975,78.6226699442992,71.3974082073434,8.761373195407527,31.83863817210413,9.345792617884785,3.1342518358531324,1955,91,348,45,38,634,214,463,0.11900000000000001,0.6559999999999999,0.225,0.9954,2,2,1,0,0,0,60.0,0,0,9,3,24,35,1,1,15,0,34,4,1,6,9,88,74,26,0,16,18,0,9,6,5,6,3,3,0,3,24,16,0,0,18,0,0,4,10,9,2,1,14,13,58,26,55,49,13,29,0,2,1,0,31,14,0,13,16,249,82,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296498283986322,0.0,0.07903712783212193,0.0,0.044455983482484814,0.0,0.0,0.04063368434423456,0.0,0.09564344419507206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05459870500197385,0.0,0.0,0.10627471320638998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05924967342466125,0.05969765281100741,0.12295086048907647,0.0,0.06092996031835286,0.0,0.0,0.09279637226636632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05005230121653125,0.05898307044102567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050854731927622084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5883197262169171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514848185973975,0.05256617789928158,0.0,0.16658725226125326,0.0,0.0,0.054783391757927534,0.0,0.176300873942819,0.04151565636073351,0.1673916411609884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22448827092167492,0.0,0.0,0.05574690564117325,0.06605346483602452,0.04874209563168706,0.09295591722376187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06186194823053232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06549712891601445,0.0,0.038951653923871114,0.06139915739737546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703452994536792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03879061484380345,0.05891705996314652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708467082183685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926927997804213,0.044820023220835635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22304244580106752,0.0,0.0,0.061888027343113286,0.039378604864847816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014398149635141,0.10148336971447168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102646028715662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121182870877457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583025267310852,0.0,0.0,0.046213475672731916,0.0,0.0,0.04630822202762548,0.052903532700417866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048071347070891335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044737922170900175,0.0,0.0,0.041132400662647714,0.0,0.09281760225286788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109540884262956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050792977865327216,0.0,0.0,0.06747321300666381,0.03860743231178285,0.18618105282110525,0.2283813559895409,0.046134916837085975,0.033885927090257485,0.0,0.0,0.11105816817416883,0.0,0.0,0.06320982638539765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855263971555009,0.046127080637992916,0.0,0.0,0.10450042121530446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256305399735255,0.06353701049586759,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RevolutionaryBeyond6,2020/01/06,"Self conscious about my appearance I’ve always been self conscious about my appearance but I’m really self conscious when it comes to my teeth. They are very crooked because my mouth is small and crowded. And right now, I just started my journey to fix it now that I can afford it, but it’s hitting me emotionally. It’s like I feel really emotional about the idea of changing how they look and I don’t know it it’s in a good or bad way, but I just feel really emotional and I don’t know how to change that.",2.0212499999999984,4.1386878557692315,3.4429230769230803,88.90207692307693,79.09615384615384,7.236923076923077,24.823076923076925,8.238735603445708,1.5504184615384615,403,15,85,8,10,132,59,104,0.047,0.8370000000000001,0.11599999999999999,0.7209,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,2,0,10,3,0,0,2,0,6,2,2,2,0,23,17,11,0,0,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,9,5,0,0,8,0,0,4,2,1,0,0,1,3,14,2,8,15,0,12,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,3,5,54,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231083121031398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276848746601408,0.0969323191765409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364275007398728,0.13697487098305633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5366017348714378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608026224539452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337183122560772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17950534090585768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17477781737140774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768529520658662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13353014183374395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056017286217721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579549106914554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4976529957535936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125496047715347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13120166119444288,0.0,0.12621642820340626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SNCreestopherX,2020/01/06,"Need help. Really scared. So I’ve been having a lot of mental issues the last 2 months. This sounds weird but it just ended up with me in the hospital. So sometimes when I eat, and only when I eat something, I’ll start to get a rush of anxiety. Then I’ll start hearing things that aren’t happening. What I mean is if someone is talking I’ll hear something completely different than what their saying. And if I respond, I’ll mumble and not say anything that makes sense. The other day the anxiety and brain fog was so bad that I passed out and fell and hit my face and ended up in the hospital for a few days. 
The doctors didn’t understand what was going on, and did a bunch of tests but still don’t know what’s happening, and I have tons of tests and appointments over the next few days.

Has anyone ever heard of this before? I’m really scared about what’s happening to me.",4.332627118644069,5.147951259887009,5.162500000000001,84.32137711864408,70.29943502824858,8.837853107344634,26.049435028248592,9.075114841892004,1.8545333333333336,691,20,142,13,12,225,106,177,0.10800000000000001,0.8809999999999999,0.011000000000000001,-0.9453,2,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,9,4,0,2,11,0,12,5,2,1,1,25,29,20,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,13,12,2,0,3,0,0,4,4,4,0,0,6,6,10,0,18,22,5,26,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,3,15,93,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19777258761863786,0.0,0.0,0.09038410881635756,0.0,0.10637292196375972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792969969164506,0.0,0.0,0.10999379578863176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443009183281732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355304165119781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500929687302737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350529409308846,0.0,0.1323067634306131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26453784991690066,0.0,0.0,0.2289783494867974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692631913607925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06753489148396284,0.0,0.0734634780205919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34292210161412906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913789247833252,0.0,0.0866426607296269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491760595680974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103988944095614,0.1053670797840464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989528311891472,0.0,0.0,0.0862844511807902,0.0,0.0,0.14080594623733994,0.0,0.0,0.13026729727129865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317696561581544,0.0,0.0,0.09584731532231304,0.0,0.0,0.13747329619308934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983107862973864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16561913360070254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20559119269621226,0.258830810933601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952462173667464,0.19902685621399316,0.12784499741248087,0.0,0.1829868709849477,0.0,0.10323007127566736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389717855788036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587698653231919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13456795764268698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iuy193,2020/01/06,"Not really sure what to do, not a cry for help but moreso just confusion About a year and a half ago I started hallucinating sounds, seeing the walls/floor move, and fearing that friends/ college professors/ acquaintances were plotting ""something"". If someone said or did something specific, like a keyword or phrase or literally just clearing throats, it'd ""trigger"" me to drop the conversation and immediately have to think about what I did for them to say/do that for atleast 15 minutes.
   This all started around the time I started trying to smoke pot less, as I had spent just about every day for the past year smoking 1-3 times a day with a small group of friends and wanted to start paying more attention to my studies in music education. I started noticing that I felt empty, and reluctantly told my parents I thought I was depressed. I tried smoking again with another group of friends in college, and this was one of the worst times of my life. I remember vividly being the most paranoid I had ever been, I analyzed every body movement, every word that was spoken, and tried to read it all and come up with something to say/do given the body movements/ things said that wouldn't seem out of place/ out of character. I felt like I wasn't real, and that I didn't know how to be myself anymore. 

I know this sounds like just a bad time with weed, but I had smoked for a couple years at this point and it was nothing like the other times. On top of this, this feeling of not being who I am consisted and I still feel it sometimes if I let my guard down. 
 I've always been super anxious in any social environment and all of this only hightened my not wanting to leave my dorm room in fear of even seeing anyone and having to ""act"" like a person. Eventually I couldn't handle the not feeling like a real person anymore and resorted to cutting, this only lasted about a month though as I still wasn't feeling anything and had decided I wasn't real, so I might as well test that theory and kill myself. I downed the vyvance I was given for anxiety and took sleeping medication I had left over to ease my way down. Before I went to bed, and I don't even remember this part, I had messaged two old highschool friends and told them not to think it was their fault and to blame me instead. 
 They ended up calling campus police who carried me to their car and then rushed me to the e.r. To get my stomache pumped and 6 staples put in my forearm from where I had cut it clean open to ""feel something"" after telling someone all of this I was admitted to a facility and given anxiety/ depression/ sleeping medication and talked to doctors who never really told me what they thought was my condition. I've been to therapy and only been told ""social anxiety"" but I think it's something more and I'm not really sure what to do about it incase another ""episode"" happens.

A last tidbit is that my biological mother apparently had schizophrenia, according to my adoptive mother. Any help would be greatly appreciated and I'm very sorry for the long post. 

Tl;dr : A year and 3 months ago I was admitted to a facility somewhere in Texas after attempted suicide, and I still don't know my condition. I'm confused, and just want help on trying to figure it all out as I don't feel comfortable talking about it/the words escape me irl.",8.735065616797904,7.2467365354330715,8.664685039370081,70.64122703412077,61.59842519685039,11.364304461942258,38.80446194225722,10.203070172399654,3.912507611548557,2640,112,474,46,30,861,286,635,0.13,0.765,0.105,-0.965,2,0,7,0,0,2,67.0,0,0,6,3,25,28,3,4,27,0,47,11,7,2,10,112,94,46,2,8,20,3,8,6,4,3,4,4,4,2,36,40,0,1,24,1,2,10,17,12,1,3,44,15,63,16,82,40,11,75,0,2,3,0,39,27,0,10,41,333,99,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755942291921937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050481752997109317,0.0,0.0,0.08251446654581289,0.12723419072919048,0.13923564263183655,0.06853908807110018,0.12033537064585455,0.04242141483907524,0.0,0.04992569943282514,0.05400857738419797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050656366744498686,0.0,0.0,0.051625141874824934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347799249660406,0.0,0.0,0.061950181830290635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052261266447538916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712947341709158,0.06664242381437327,0.0782534135980237,0.0,0.1045088314202102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06209764272732045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0537350297522004,0.0,0.0,0.08014305693899565,0.054878893586878336,0.15334961285973306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653975456408424,0.18405745456554956,0.04334219033340145,0.1165041658562023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874919337680252,0.0,0.03169722736962615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688816417841728,0.0,0.0,0.05364969912140037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199614406910772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712163845552371,0.0,0.10002685182922696,0.098907222971745,0.0,0.06424007364089278,0.06591741803451168,0.062038513078470976,0.042852550743260345,0.17783985702089916,0.0,0.0,0.05369045887179389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223595946042864,0.0,0.0643605847905132,0.0,0.0,0.09685138056997432,0.06448190959996808,0.0,0.0,0.04679193700577708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058213870294729714,0.06907244843694439,0.0636622691676995,0.0,0.041111116545668576,0.1384253062831218,0.0,0.0,0.06736612500341868,0.06569898563575165,0.05791575220069733,0.0,0.1059482593174125,0.06338654999748508,0.0,0.05735213863317769,0.0,0.05810445946469316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060989446097562024,0.0,0.0,0.060685760386421976,0.20716498158431326,0.11659900280765025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374530763171279,0.0,0.11542087552545212,0.09649339233234634,0.0,0.0,0.09669122201431073,0.05523109074049398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142631414851715,0.12368950861423095,0.10280987387339073,0.2335311190799389,0.060003530945407065,0.06791436174541561,0.21471036407320174,0.0,0.14535184563306294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636241355368562,0.0,0.11436027444105795,0.0,0.0,0.09752743861575056,0.05302767936776425,0.0,0.06938068042087296,0.0,0.04030601527774184,0.1166233946691648,0.059607320873657665,0.09632936206977016,0.17688390721901562,0.0,0.0,0.2318886263658574,0.06740587172183836,0.16476200419951822,0.0,0.05926513192528993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05005856128815541,0.10735305010926137,0.048156500072271104,0.0,0.0,0.0545490249133848,0.056241088225624326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04309776015301965,0.0,0.0,0.15627626953422524
mentalhealth,spookygh0ste,2020/01/06,"venting sorry if this is gonna be long or if im junping from one thing to another, i just want to vent out, hoping someone will read this, perhaps they give me an advice or whatever.

im a 21 yo male, living with my mother and younger brother.

i have been feeling pretty depressed past few months, with occasional “anxiety attacks” where id just stay home and skip school for days, with endless thoughts of death or even suicide. it has gotten even worse since the new year started. i feel like wanting to cry, but i cant. im sick from my stomach, but i cant throw up. i dont know how to go on with my life, because im scared i’d skip school or my job, but im also scared to go see my doctor

i hope this makes at least some sense. i dont want to see like a little bitch, but it has just been so hard for me for these past few months.

now, i finally decided to see a doctor, but how should i approach her? what if she tells me it’s nothing?

thank you for ANY kind of advice, sending love to every person who reads this and sorry for my english, for its not my first language",2.1386392559960825,3.403887594713656,3.571505139500733,91.91842266275087,76.13656387665198,6.101713166911408,24.505384238864412,6.42735559955562,0.5939302006852665,832,27,187,6,18,274,139,227,0.14800000000000002,0.743,0.109,-0.7954,1,0,0,0,0,1,25.0,0,1,1,1,11,12,2,2,5,0,13,6,1,3,0,39,34,19,2,9,16,2,3,2,0,3,4,0,1,2,12,8,0,0,5,2,0,5,5,5,0,2,4,6,24,7,26,26,4,24,0,1,3,1,13,6,1,10,14,113,36,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18172265817236552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435799491405963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323122324705109,0.0975001579170188,0.07113128458359227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578090796675693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566812104689404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021368047163376,0.0599659583609287,0.0,0.08008560834784997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903428610655456,0.0,0.0,0.2179493700670204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282800185582507,0.0,0.07834168569862471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402939457859864,0.06642664802215957,0.0,0.10185767867755507,0.0,0.07909078537303177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089197194599896,0.10568808598812604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08329397041092874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932689325700403,0.1847050148438613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5021847610982025,0.0,0.09227068858552902,0.0,0.0,0.0968268652857716,0.05110069755830387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06567622178707952,0.09085301177879933,0.0931927961981922,0.08210516628049648,0.08228650158633996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392024991801866,0.0,0.06206647671430344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484353355954868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898029852281081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921912442195183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300728337839845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17752445166157407,0.0,0.08118864870581552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459653268237997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18601513279034165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861832147033597,0.1882063139563544,0.22228481263303904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691600547232083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878368920048978,0.0,0.0,0.20817237747376652,0.06581342415456558,0.09910687099997094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017076583606455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127071949291519,0.0856057050564864,0.0,0.0,0.06177337761278352,0.0,0.0,0.07381764256935301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16453029297454805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475701342180842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05987761965138921
mentalhealth,kaassii,2020/01/06,"I can't stop daydreaming/fantasizing. So I know there is something wrong with me because I'm constantly talking to myself or daydreaming or fantasizing.  I will try to explain.

I keep daydreaming/fantasizing about stuff that is unnecessary like hanging out with friends, laughing with them, playing a football match or meeting a girl. I say unnecessary because I can just call my friends if I want to hang out or go out somewhere. The worst part is it's there all the time.. from the time I wake up till the time  I go to sleep.. thinking or daydreaming about places or talking to someone. Like some kind of scenario just in a loop. Sometimes I'm just playing the scene in my head and sometimes acting it out. I guess.. like when you are a baby and acted to be a superhero. Problem is I find comfort in it and it's getting really hard to control and I don't know what to do. 
Started when I was like 14, realized it was bad when i was 18 and now I'm 22 and it has affected my studies and my social life.....If anyone has suffered from this and got through it please suggest me what you did. 

Sorry if you find this hard to understand that's because English isn't my first language.",3.9693939393939424,5.5912749653679645,4.841839826839827,83.20656926406926,72.07359307359306,7.730735930735931,32.74675324675325,8.344100000000001,2.5619454545454543,931,46,180,15,18,302,120,231,0.099,0.768,0.134,0.7271,0,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,3,1,2,12,16,0,0,10,0,18,3,3,2,1,43,34,21,0,4,11,0,2,4,2,1,0,1,0,1,14,15,0,3,8,2,0,6,3,5,0,1,5,3,26,11,27,27,4,27,0,1,0,0,15,9,0,10,16,126,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417121742986108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11245197136868904,0.24629858911809704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375230898142035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455409712637948,0.15105479932739654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461897156105287,0.11455853235111825,0.0,0.0,0.2081064920653022,0.0,0.07036461423722468,0.0,0.15308321899565924,0.0,0.10771570476002264,0.0,0.14836493606884196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412932166236167,0.0,0.1382202856095655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970955602391285,0.0,0.14024824165015412,0.1480329443382606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512829519657047,0.263190904982643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14584505219111074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407116807533629,0.14783792941800233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12887033837964615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627930089207414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10710274827401732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13477702093110924,0.13728905145773465,0.11411372090246305,0.1036830566587256,0.2664034464977079,0.15076296136749012,0.09532702507110856,0.0,0.0,0.1125983072630187,0.0,0.0,0.15417609971102025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21650097390908915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629735004093697,0.0,0.0,0.2355985478054614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143871427032507,0.0,0.0,0.14020637658783194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943761000545331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725117170180213,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itismejd,2020/01/06,"Struggling alone A few months ago I finally decided to seek help with my mental health by going to a therapist. I was diagnosed with depression and at the time I mentioned it to a few friends. However, lately I have been feeling like I'm at my lowest. Within the last 2 months, I had two deep friendships end. I feel like I have nobody to talk to about what's going on. My therapist can be helpful in the moment but realizing you have nobody else to lean on makes everything 100 times worse. I have been trying to fight all of my suicidal thoughts but now that I've more people in my life, I feel like I have nothing else left. How can I overcome this alone? I don't want to bring unnecessary attention to myself by bringing it up but I just wish I hadn't messed everything up",4.333906158357774,5.467119458064516,5.3596480938416455,81.73401759530792,70.54838709677419,8.991202346041055,28.929618768328446,9.339509955726095,2.4546774193548377,616,23,122,13,11,203,96,155,0.158,0.7070000000000001,0.136,-0.7564,2,2,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,4,8,1,1,6,0,14,3,0,2,1,19,26,5,1,2,4,0,3,3,1,0,3,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,7,0,0,4,2,4,0,1,6,3,21,4,24,19,4,26,0,1,0,0,7,11,0,0,14,82,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271151689838093,0.0,0.0,0.2867473757989043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923118295718953,0.1405054531400446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312841597619851,0.0,0.12260956469475255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24882731098566996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20998596713517334,0.2966873070063493,0.0,0.15164536765767395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695213387377718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734806511192267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714662440273882,0.0,0.0,0.1855759540561665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128404656111305,0.1561572002088432,0.0,0.1504066522021895,0.0,0.0977785369603484,0.20289248517459504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240436069972026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13950678435925035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209900258087064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282913080998754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597124147748287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447190669349233,0.0,0.1514220179170433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126630849201047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214601850134269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098994566967192,0.1614414951709777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939861655715874,0.0,0.13522784039473482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165071464709671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591898402712397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410739212306404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stltryin2figritout,2020/01/07,"I can’t let anything go but I’m not a hoarder I am text book depressed, I’ve known this for a very long time. As early as I can remember, maybe 10. I was told all the things you can think of before mental health was a priority and semi normalized. I’ve had the job I have now since I was 19, I’m 25 now. It pays well and I get yearly pay increases. I make a lot of money, more than I’d like to admit but I’m always broke. Constantly dipping into savings, and maxing my credit card out. I’m addicted to shopping, honestly sounds unreal but I am. I can’t stop, and I want to. I buy things and thrift a lot. Fashion is my ultimate vice and the only thing I look forward to in my life, hoping I can make a career out of it one day. But it is literally taking over my life. I have clothes everywhere that I never even wear because I hate the way I look in anything that isn’t baggy. I wish I was one of those people who can’t eat due to stress but I’m not. I can’t wear anything that isn’t a jacket or sweater. Yet my closet is filled with tiny things I love but will never wear. I have a huge walk in closet, filled to the brim, two dressers, 4 giant tubs of clothes in the living room, two racks in the living room and things I thrift that I plan to alter one day in another bin. But I can’t bring myself to get rid of things because I have no money, no savings, and a maxed out credit card so I want to sell it. But that’s harder than it seems. All of it consumes me and tears me apart but I can’t part with it. Am I a hoarder? Because I want to get rid of it but it’s just now cost me more than I can afford to just let it go. 
I want to do better, I want to not live with piles of clothes in literally every corner of my house. But it’s hard. And this isn’t even just one thing. It’s all the hobbies I try to pick up but never do. Like journaling, I have literally 15 journals that are empty because 1. I have nothing interesting to write about and 2. I’m afraid to touch it because it will get ugly and messed up if I write in it. 
Or like altering clothes with my sewing machine, I have a whole bunch of feet, thread, beading, whatever and I haven’t touched it once.
Over a 200 pairs of shoes that I never wear. Mind you my wardrobe is 95% thrifted but it all adds up. 
Cameras and electronics I never used
Over $3,000 worth of makeup and brushes I never touch sitting in a giant drawer in my bathroom 
I obsess over things and then never use them. 
What’s wrong with me, and how can I fix this? 
I’m 25 and I want to live a normal life and move forward",0.5329562289562304,2.354820272727274,2.7138585858585884,93.74649158249159,82.63636363636363,5.455892255892255,20.185185185185183,6.51773550054525,0.08229023569023575,1970,55,456,19,54,668,231,550,0.10400000000000001,0.8,0.095,-0.7727,2,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,0,2,1,2,13,21,1,3,22,0,41,13,6,6,11,91,76,40,0,11,22,0,4,3,0,2,5,1,5,0,38,29,1,1,5,2,14,10,22,8,1,6,6,8,63,13,63,66,12,61,0,2,2,1,9,30,0,7,26,304,101,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094808010966116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061785474668022165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077862043228321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18331473380689106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22632347239490197,0.0,0.06318488773008127,0.0,0.0,0.06567183959031445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024245232607816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577568163735936,0.0,0.06395506666208425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598062339568787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808844820832026,0.0,0.06256239834644532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15517909917309874,0.0,0.08440078965748607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651721251891615,0.0733106874418474,0.0,0.07892878305297713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375121311342044,0.0,0.08567942146024991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368587391897301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15185997912834442,0.15734389345945196,0.10883061035497953,0.0,0.2622714113608472,0.0657126642715371,0.124709717567598,0.0,0.0,0.12625659613161164,0.06701734916582855,0.0,0.09913056134886797,0.0,0.07459836284376495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483080744667621,0.0,0.07497561320264183,0.0,0.0,0.07892050405544862,0.0,0.0,0.4008861235648004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550677577855342,0.0712489443191188,0.0,0.0,0.07907834041817123,0.20126637441072712,0.05647369426902148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08041010408146733,0.0,0.0514785393728688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411557702166092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759826977540635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06142387326318637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062079868123001127,0.085057979120493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582994616516599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3946497319226507,0.04757911766285825,0.0,0.0,0.043298243503101325,0.0,0.0,0.07095310681341904,0.0,0.05041375364532614,0.0,0.14507120255814687,0.0,0.0,0.1282636417635893,0.0,0.061267523149682736,0.2627824417444653,0.0589395581307624,0.0,0.0,0.06676347782820137,0.0,0.0,0.08290220531627354,0.08538870951342663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118535298094673,0.0,0.04781729495939244
mentalhealth,Just_Darki,2020/01/07,"What is this strange feeling in my heart when I worry about something? When I'm really hurt mentally, there's a feeling in my heart that someone is squeezing it. Is this normal for you?",3.9333333333333336,5.9063101111111145,4.495555555555558,84.20500000000001,72.8888888888889,7.022222222222222,31.44444444444445,7.793537801064563,2.275844444444444,148,7,27,2,3,47,27,36,0.23,0.693,0.077,-0.7878,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,3,2,2,0,0,3,6,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,4,6,0,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,20,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858732179710329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6699782617230997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30262559992559906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848851324519506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27697627825189725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18109851743584526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395224052681483,0.21762865078844013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870855197353505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,omfgthissuckz,2020/01/07,Help I'm really feeling like I just want to die rn like I cant do anything right for anyone and I fuck every thing up,-0.706666666666667,1.164540555555554,2.342222222222226,94.30000000000004,87.88888888888891,5.0814814814814815,16.407407407407412,6.42735559955562,-0.357237037037037,93,2,22,1,3,33,23,27,0.21899999999999997,0.444,0.336,0.2382,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,6,1,1,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,2,3,6,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,2,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24866603794896866,0.0,0.2926546867162985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3690896829578933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996351472913241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17981813413268846,0.2540634438318978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3287758877467365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23837251307935475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3474874879629867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22782685087212046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037076318165086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362659794032733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097608620054617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,runrowrepeatt,2020/01/07,"Unusual question Unusual question

I don’t know if this belongs or is even connected. I have had depression for years now. I am in my late twenty’s. Growing up I would always be effected deeply by external environments. Example/ whenever I would go to nyc I would go home and cry for several nights about the homeless people. Recently with the Australia wildfires it’s been happening again. These videos break my heart (as I’m sure they do many) but I have that feeling lingering for a longggg time. This made me ask around and realized it’s not the norm. I was curious if anyone felt this or knows what this is or if it’s related to my depression?",2.7122004608294934,5.468718169354844,4.136866359447005,81.17887096774194,81.01612903225806,9.02672811059908,29.82488479262673,9.424239791934726,3.4730110599078348,519,26,95,17,14,171,87,124,0.079,0.856,0.065,-0.5789,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,5,3,0,0,4,0,14,1,1,2,1,25,24,10,0,6,8,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,10,4,0,0,8,1,0,3,2,2,0,0,5,2,13,1,12,15,0,14,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,8,7,66,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14631621194574354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295414394559287,0.0,0.0,0.1565383526971994,0.16439030997518786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931562679283396,0.0,0.0,0.3029081880171053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614323799073845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891195971327537,0.0,0.16883772068052258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998722821871325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549818065790394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208375868987946,0.0,0.0,0.17638576983999998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932784182217116,0.0,0.19835957921372285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16638775057244146,0.0,0.17827811552086578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501758881686812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190801993524752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39397082510824855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736246379775648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19865355581755093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657307953851106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025359925988732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3747433855534176,0.0,0.0,0.11323770678372234
mentalhealth,Saphyy002200,2020/01/07,"[United States - California] A Question regarding when talking to a therapist or mental health professional Hi,

I have a question regarding seeking help from a mental health professional. If I tell them if I've been having situational on/off suicidal thoughts, would they be required to report it to the police? Asking because I just want to talk to a professional before deciding on any legal decisions, issues, or etc. In other words, I just want to talk and share my story.

Thank you.",6.252016806722692,8.740736352941179,7.331596638655466,64.12647058823532,67.82352941176471,10.033613445378153,33.31932773109244,10.290406445055957,4.251638655462185,390,18,56,11,7,131,60,85,0.054000000000000006,0.807,0.139,0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,2,1,3,2,0,0,6,0,5,2,0,0,0,17,10,6,1,5,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,8,2,9,6,1,4,0,0,0,0,13,2,0,6,1,39,10,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914583212342253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16379360707088833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680372196341634,0.0,0.14908708120292352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954005838594726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724707698630582,0.0,0.0,0.1174366363413589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18286915121685293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3531321196277641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925407923065167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19693846178498506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19164651522488188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4224709308017428,0.1531374375507471,0.16130579861813804,0.0,0.20342723300359253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13909369450202938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20668163247316013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12446104812993605,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loloyolo69,2020/01/07,??? Ok its weird but whenever i feel that something is a little wrong i google it and get panic and i constantly search for answers what is wrong whit me?,-0.08999999999999986,1.8011440000000007,1.3066666666666684,94.60000000000002,109.0,4.666666666666667,18.333333333333336,6.42735559955562,0.3643333333333332,120,4,24,2,6,38,25,30,0.375,0.5820000000000001,0.042,-0.9271,0,0,1,0,1,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,4,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,15,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35150013521716683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16446573291876326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993957924094846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260048966214036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3816329799651726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25040789627008136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7112609777800125,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PerpetuallyChaotic,2020/01/07,"I just have to get it off my chest The way I have been recently, going though episodes where I feel like someone else is taking over my mind and my thought.
Making me say things I don't recognise as my own words. 
Or maybe they are. Maybe they are actually my true words, portraying what I'm really thinking and feeling. 
It doesn't feel like me. 
It feels like an ugly deeply shut in person managed to sneak out and cause me to react in ways that are unfamiliar to me. 

I try to stop and tell it to stop this. I will only regret it later. They're not my true feelings. But it doesn't work. It's crawled out from it's dark hiding space. It's making me say the things I don't want to say.it makes me say hurtful things I know are wrong and I will so deeply regret and feel ashamed of later.
And it's made more appearances in the past few months than maybe ever before. 

I don't know why. 

Am I really, truly so convinced I am unworthy of sharing my love and life with someone that I have to push him away to the point of not being able to repair the damage I've done? 
Do I really want to hurt myself so much that I am able to make him leave me. Surely soon he's had enough? 
Is there a guarantee I'll be better after we're married? 

This fucking bitch is insane and it's only a matter of time until I'll be put in the psych ward. 
Apparently I have to be punished. 
I don't think I will ever know why. 

Maybe it will only stop if I kill it off. But to kill it off I have to kill myself. It might be the only escape. 

Do I want to die? 
Partially yes. Partially no. Which has the most votes? 
Cowardice makes ""no"" win. 

I must be mentally ill. I must be bipolar or manic depressive or something. 

Maybe it doesn't matter. 
I just need it to end.",1.0163247863247875,2.983200571428572,2.843992673992677,92.6815628815629,81.74725274725277,5.692796092796093,18.902319902319906,6.816661863887847,0.06711623931623968,1344,32,299,15,36,447,175,364,0.19699999999999998,0.685,0.11800000000000001,-0.9859,1,0,1,0,0,4,39.0,0,0,2,3,12,25,6,1,11,1,42,6,1,8,7,66,71,21,4,9,10,0,6,3,0,7,3,3,0,1,27,12,0,3,12,0,0,4,11,14,0,0,5,9,44,11,38,52,6,36,0,6,0,2,12,15,2,7,18,198,71,3,0.1603203040083811,0.0,0.07822474511514801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753131015187819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821038528139571,0.0,0.0,0.07089514030204963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823465572384154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904182146138797,0.0,0.08319358212449239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08203166651061633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696352107345772,0.0,0.07099810188206443,0.08282686517964223,0.0,0.0,0.1450188934862034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431882883783687,0.17179928582564832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410676884439331,0.04188037093392556,0.0,0.045556861675409344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17162620126436767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26605599443412736,0.0,0.13216176951726374,0.0,0.0,0.08487802676020036,0.0,0.0,0.056619485977892264,0.11748660367071385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234766684506871,0.07584947401775577,0.2675376195828932,0.0,0.4026582347246989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078257935125961,0.08503725367266568,0.08093890243356963,0.0,0.06398306855728554,0.0,0.05892693506838208,0.05943773700550934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24386163101591066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765219353982609,0.0,0.06999275280886033,0.0,0.0,0.07577725369484685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058309314675814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405793797565878,0.0,0.07914847951134434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25498628106658505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13583887332725053,0.06171120128352056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010524292285245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554999460751766,0.0,0.06027045825314559,0.0,0.07006350605338234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15976452934030316,0.10272677735842033,0.0787569423487954,0.06363820671545972,0.04674202926450989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054423481360273696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418416035899859,0.12725479502594828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446641381394486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835754536185335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764254246510414,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cjo_97,2020/01/07,"I need help before it’s too late, it might already be I’m undiagnosed, I don’t know what it is but from my perspective, I think it’s BPD. Everyday for the past 3 years, my life just keeps getting worse. My emotions are completely out of control. I can’t remember the last time I was able to rest my mind. My dissociation couldn’t be worse. I don’t remember the last time I’ve felt in the moment, I don’t remember the last time I’ve felt anything. I can’t drive anymore because once I snap back to reality, I’m blanked out again 3 seconds later. I’m exhausted and I’m tapping out. There’s no more reason to go on and there never will be. I have no identity, I’ve lost myself. I’m afraid of what I really am so I’d rather stay lost anyways. I",-0.005412115193642819,2.186082553459124,2.7390930155577635,90.32973187686196,88.24528301886794,6.366236345580933,22.204899040052968,7.669130373188453,1.0850176100628932,582,22,131,12,19,203,91,159,0.16,0.8270000000000001,0.013000000000000001,-0.9690000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,3,9,4,0,1,5,0,16,2,0,2,1,23,31,4,0,3,3,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,6,5,0,2,8,0,0,2,9,4,0,1,5,2,18,0,12,20,2,23,0,2,0,0,1,5,0,1,15,75,24,0,0.1328682991686449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466234721121602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176964999826926,0.0,0.0,0.10933928910300472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216752059003867,0.0,0.08099528193423979,0.0,0.11306113637987153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16734297152759506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930988375314582,0.0,0.1490230955384333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945895298057552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551488074672904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941820237880464,0.0,0.07551211636869681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905882018919951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809944923067052,0.0,0.0,0.07302094241687274,0.3249161925543109,0.14988122879798366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384880908524483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900828881505422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14095226841472333,0.13415910566590605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852016026544456,0.1024762233896807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415004022624266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12683782591789902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08511883473467917,0.13661074072934434,0.0,0.0,0.45154164549333903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161992822403888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513664112048984,0.0,0.0,0.23242972123138386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708082962184273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556282840630218
mentalhealth,brooklyn997,2020/01/07,"I don't know if I'm happy. Honestly, I don't know. Some days, I feel like I am great, happy, content, lucky...   
Other days I constantly ask myself if I am living my best life. Could I do more to be happy? Am I missing something in my life? Is it just the depression, or is there something else telling me that I am on the wrong path? I feel like I am in a constant existential crisis, with very few ""content, happy"" days. I'm tired :(",0.7668039950062422,2.7446556179775317,3.1161048689138577,90.3348564294632,82.70786516853933,5.7533083645443215,22.24843945068665,6.937597516519254,0.6424671660424477,326,11,71,4,9,112,53,89,0.17300000000000001,0.539,0.289,0.9292,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,2,13,0,0,3,0,12,3,0,0,0,12,20,3,0,3,4,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,15,10,5,18,4,8,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,5,7,47,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137617538906038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448339088696875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181543184365038,0.0,0.11753184214744745,0.0,0.0,0.2848066624724404,0.0,0.12678812807060602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12297154545188906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488633372234722,0.21032768634667529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16229489912028394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6268131873512685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618009008154952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20795160056637849,0.14383462310703582,0.0,0.1299854062719305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22665241229482055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12866434561753134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16919139655014878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214601903663724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16094641860967726,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cursecatcherx,2020/01/07,"Dealing with betrayal My now ex girlfriend of 3.5 years just revealed yesterday that she had been cheating on me for 2.5 years. I feel horrible. While making the step to block her on everything, she begins to post all the happy pictures of her and her not so new boyfriend. I’ve never treated her bad. I always adored her and I was completely in love with her but apparently not her. My family and I completely paid for multiple vacations so she can go with us (she comes from a low income family). My family loved her. We did everything for her. I did everything for her. But this entire time it was fake. I feel betrayed, deceived, manipulated, angry, and just straight up confused. I’m lost on this.",2.4627272727272747,5.290415500000004,3.8971969696969713,81.81579545454547,83.3939393939394,7.8454545454545475,25.674242424242426,8.660442795831766,2.4859151515151523,554,23,100,15,16,182,84,132,0.242,0.655,0.10400000000000001,-0.9725,2,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,2,0,0,1,5,11,1,1,3,0,7,2,0,2,2,24,18,9,0,0,6,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,3,0,1,3,3,6,0,0,8,2,26,5,17,10,1,20,0,2,0,2,21,7,0,1,9,73,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844096523405902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13891982530322308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14332109607536658,0.34889121046214755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17152982604093905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44859315196401134,0.0,0.470542991422764,0.0,0.16825281846583084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945572308821852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771139344825409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18162273783914676,0.0,0.30032775683269713,0.0,0.1110595222507392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832202805282933,0.16069023350612482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15934544612894078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701714934968478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001338978339308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142857202159261
mentalhealth,dogsandnumbers,2020/01/07,"So f-ing frustrated!!! First time on this sub but I needed to vent.

My fiance has diagnosed OCD and recently had to get new insurance (we're USA). He's miles better than he was a few years ago (he wasn't able to leave the house before) and I'd consider him incredibly high functioning but it still affects his day-to-day life and our relationship. We have been searching for MONTHS to find a clinic that could help him and also are trying to get him a prescription for his medication since his past psychiatrist is now out-of-network for him.

We have been warned by different MH providers that he needs to see a specialist bc his condition requires certain treatment, yet all the ones that are available are $200 - $700 a session and some want to have 3-5 sessions a week! That's somewhere in the neighborhood of $1200 a week if I'm being conservative (3x$400) which puts it at $4800 a month, close to $57,600 a year! That's more than our combined household income!! Granted, most say that they want to see ""short term"" results, but that looks like 8-16 weeks. So $9600 - $19,200. 

And the websites that say they have a sliding scale never do when we call them to confirm. The one clinic that does have a scholarship program said the process would take 1-2 weeks after they received his application. He submitted his application early November and they STILL haven't gotten back to us! He has called and emailed them several times and the person assigned to his application is apparently never there. 

I'm so fucking frustrated. All we want is literally some kind of treatment for his diagnosed disorder. His insurance really only has in-network MH providers for addiction. I'm sick to my stomach trying to understand how the system got to be this way. I could cry.",5.9294886363636365,6.883809681547621,6.2752922077922095,77.27425324675328,66.76785714285714,9.918614718614721,32.832251082251084,10.018931242160765,3.2588380952380955,1407,59,261,32,22,453,195,336,0.071,0.863,0.065,-0.7877,3,0,0,0,0,0,55.0,7,0,6,3,12,7,3,0,19,0,26,10,1,3,5,41,45,19,0,9,4,0,0,1,0,1,8,3,0,1,14,14,0,2,2,0,1,3,4,3,0,3,8,6,30,4,29,32,8,38,0,0,3,1,42,7,1,4,27,155,44,6,0.1097633056292572,0.0,0.0,0.11965820480831076,0.0,0.0,0.09729854770144536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877776758553269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440120674438685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340048864103732,0.0,0.0,0.0970767240086588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22416121464149985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17527413604698874,0.0,0.12056983714597636,0.14157650327831456,0.0,0.0,0.2228148894285277,0.0,0.11467929245385194,0.12579825769796354,0.0,0.09605460843802667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032167281519633,0.0933646116956355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10147440735190502,0.1146935937558306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778774258051203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735720300521091,0.11597095882096885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665211759265127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430159198032425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162234920911964,0.0,0.0,0.07752906885253835,0.05362480677173125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217353213364987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057498273605257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17522404670050787,0.0,0.0,0.16277620063659734,0.16931245598886932,0.10601008455518646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875691318212386,0.08347994005503269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478149520004018,0.0,0.09584108470740373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034243898584573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031718423617501,0.0,0.108378022365034,0.11784471247541345,0.0,0.0,0.10441003919749643,0.1745763724257665,0.0,0.0,0.17493428696686308,0.0,0.0,0.12400129247826025,0.0,0.09079734067922472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17531423532513368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252834562127036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128007732411083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904415893930975,0.0,0.0,0.11426747217093855,0.1320317418726346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19422372458796813,0.08712500294717153,0.3521820118210335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797270305593544,0.0,0.0,0.14136794018781176
mentalhealth,olea-m,2020/01/07,"Could each of you help me out? Everyday is torture I'm waking up with nothing to do and it's reinforcing my depression. I'm stuck like this for far too long and I'm beyond frustrated with life. 

Please tell me what do you do, I really need help out of this. Anhedonia is an absolute nightmare. Please help.",0.644462659380693,3.160481606557376,2.9156284153005463,86.23096539162115,93.59016393442623,7.3012750455373405,21.531876138433514,8.167268648758528,1.7656214936247725,242,9,49,7,9,82,43,61,0.175,0.62,0.205,0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,0,6,2,1,0,0,9,11,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,6,1,10,9,1,7,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,3,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103422557919536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269078777183922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5297520939497415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860815246297461,0.1287076699068672,0.0,0.0,0.23314370490548664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953437854742388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25278601976208576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5783748620189387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16877190767279274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302656727122087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,some-velvet-morning,2020/01/07,"If I’m not the best, then I feel like I’m nothing. What is this called? If I’m not the smartest, then I feel stupid. If I’m not the prettiest, I feel hideous. If I’m not the most talented, I feel like I’m nothing. It’s not enough for me to be “just” smart or just pretty or just kind of good at some things. Why is this? Is there a name for it?",-1.0508544303797436,0.4799956075949368,1.106819620253166,104.71567246835446,86.59493670886076,4.9626582278481015,17.469936708860754,5.985473137389443,-0.8120012658227851,259,6,74,2,8,86,41,79,0.18899999999999997,0.6559999999999999,0.155,-0.6043,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,4,8,1,0,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,21,14,8,0,4,14,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,4,5,7,5,13,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,8,4,46,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469457865457993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402802118803467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431405534555695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4759239642192997,0.33621436996576953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973688291379022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450415945793028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299234495808944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4515770793735878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393972493248705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563310648146142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123327892231019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,exuberantfish,2020/01/07,"What am I? I’ve been a definite outcast for years now and I’m trying to figure out what I would classify as. Maybe I’m thinking too deep into this and I’m just a normal kid with lots of mental illnesses which have made me not normal, but I feel like there’s more to it. Maybe I’m just going crazy. I feel like a lot of people at school look at me like a sociopath but a lot of the traits of a sociopath I don’t have. 

I had a completely normal childhood and that was the last time I was truly content. I had a loving family and I was never a cool kid but lots of friends. There was no traumatic event that changed my but I changed. Starting around 12 years old I was diagnosed with ocd. This was the first time I endured suffering. I started losing friends and the brightness I had felt began to fade. Between age 12 and 16 I’ve been also diagnosed with tourette’s, depression, adhd, and social anxiety. The time between age 12 and now has basically been a cycle between feeling okay and then depressed over and over. 

Now I am almost completely socially withdrawn",3.1055399061032887,4.9422171361502425,4.370539906103288,84.80444835680754,74.82159624413146,7.36244131455399,27.795774647887324,8.167268648758528,1.9279464788732392,842,34,164,14,18,277,112,213,0.15,0.6920000000000001,0.158,0.1796,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,10,13,0,0,15,2,19,4,0,1,1,40,35,17,0,4,7,0,4,3,2,1,3,0,0,2,8,16,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,15,7,18,9,23,19,5,30,0,4,2,1,7,8,0,5,24,116,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367758546744937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11396290147533425,0.0,0.0,0.09101271881793073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706328903095015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013138078886355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24078887620565084,0.0,0.2386523626423021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19604640932962072,0.231026723849812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728864591636797,0.0,0.17263518588606,0.16260981338848196,0.10927413060535933,0.0,0.0,0.09680556096979964,0.0,0.0,0.17585652759667258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468006610156621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09276922178188768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16680344106258066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557058421507844,0.12732274378621486,0.0,0.38702410329058173,0.10271673029573514,0.1076884757381258,0.0,0.0,0.2286721278027936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469232910560315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777623011280197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345248751975812,0.0,0.0,0.11942301057716875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890057292026545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518040764591735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23202712829181876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16110866555634148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292397353097302,0.0,0.0,0.1990881789064332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726858792294608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084638411251803,0.0,0.0,0.14657805033923724
mentalhealth,incognito__man,2020/01/07,"Is it normal to feel like you're drifting through life? It feels as if I'm permanently on autopilot. 

I'm slower than usual, if someone were to speak to me it could be a number of seconds before I actually understand what they've said.  

My concept of time is worse. Either it feels like it's going unbearably slow, or too quickly and I'm unsure on when it did so. 

I zone out often, sometimes daydreaming, other times I'm not thinking about anything at all.  

My memory feels foggy.  At the end of the day, when I try and remember what has happened only hours before, I can only remember images and they don't feel as vivid or clear as they used to. Maybe this is a result of me zoning out. I just never feel truly awake. I'm tired, mentally and often physically. I feel as if I'm missing out on the true colours of life.

I'm only 15. Is there anything wrong with me? I feel I can't focus as well as I used to. I don't care about school anymore. Is this normal? Will it go? I've felt this way for a few months now, but I keep naively expecting it to just pass. 

Thanks.

(I'm not sure if this is an appropriate sub for this post, but I didn't know where else to put it. Sorry.)",1.2000136612021848,3.1938264877049214,3.415163934426229,88.68550546448091,81.25409836065573,6.197814207650273,21.232240437158467,7.333567415737692,0.6910961748633873,909,27,194,13,24,311,135,244,0.077,0.87,0.054000000000000006,-0.5068,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,2,0,15,9,0,0,7,0,17,3,0,3,5,50,47,21,0,8,13,0,9,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,17,8,0,1,14,0,0,5,7,2,1,1,5,13,19,7,33,39,3,29,0,1,2,0,4,9,0,8,15,125,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.11193014191500053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375105844343557,0.0,0.0,0.18877578964629485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19520161026756808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694375899108213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157819753524424,0.0,0.0,0.07397167246680827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581669337301324,0.0,0.10158969016335287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4639640067890449,0.16388265558896498,0.11012948319421756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303727096847561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142836686299564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11295587833760168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195016342345907,0.0,0.0,0.06303583176069401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203126239225388,0.11207273949453372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523103920539728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155900931059131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155202657716742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846330604972569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22476226481679207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26170235767839545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985039110145016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530465249313684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598642914957149,0.0,0.1091054665558592,0.0,0.0,0.11608199212268144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718449287825567,0.0,0.11344071354499335,0.12839667157858256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810289769112244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559986613762734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734947921611831,0.0,0.0,0.13376437241873654,0.13183017343585365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787341439332084,0.0,0.0,0.11940619847662932,0.0,0.1981270388418788,0.12632526699474747,0.0,0.0,0.09104310436327936,0.0,0.0,0.1031286027981934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688856398462827,0.0,0.12540586998999267,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mooninvoid,2020/01/07,"Grief and laughing until I cry(repression) So my dad has passed away recently, I was very close to him and he meant a lot to me. I love my dad so much, and I miss him every second. But I don't know it's hard for me to cry, to mourn. Its like my body or my mind will not allow me to cry. It won't give me what I need to feel better? Maybe because deep down I know that I won't ever feel better.. The weeks after the viewing it was like I became paralyzed emotionally. Family around me watched in expectance of some emotional display. Even myself waited, but I feel numb. I feel empty and I hate it.. I think I may be repressing the grief of losing my dad. Twice I have caught myself laughing uncontrollably at something I don't actually even find funny into a weeping cry. And it was very uncomfortable, because I was with relative's and it was out of my control. Maybe it's because I know that I am unhappy, and my ability to laugh or feel joy isn't real.. I don't know maybe it doesn't help that I psychoanalyze every reaction I have..",1.8435377358490577,3.845676466981136,3.9619245283018887,85.53732075471702,79.14150943396227,7.070188679245282,22.864150943396226,8.07648339933343,1.265763396226415,809,26,168,15,20,277,112,212,0.23,0.627,0.14300000000000002,-0.9661,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,4,6,19,1,2,5,0,19,3,1,2,1,41,37,14,3,2,5,3,6,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,13,12,0,3,12,0,0,2,8,10,0,2,7,8,38,9,21,25,3,16,0,6,2,1,9,9,0,5,7,118,51,0,0.0,0.0,0.11615023440195142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595657614477512,0.0,0.0,0.11182694660197144,0.0,0.0,0.21766773916050128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105340746568367,0.0,0.13220880899030768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334955136229879,0.0,0.0,0.3922267570461509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26777191309316545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722843159939018,0.10766400354734017,0.20056567208030315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122052148410327,0.0,0.3009105010758614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10878576079828048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11417864654729905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662210677959713,0.11751153796902508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797792644211201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26164986515559346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629820832572707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13315738770548208,0.0,0.1011899308810101,0.10742378834369334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35872675541458365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201802891918314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874963198755857,0.08825477251922126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13547534613265325,0.0,0.0,0.11752182041971873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163047426688127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762657599713102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19641449627881533,0.0,0.0,0.09547385679561936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OutcastL0rd37,2020/01/07,"I just want to quit life I'm 28, yet I've accomplished nothing worthwhile. I dropped out of college because I couldn't cope with being a FT student. I struggle finding/holding a job because of my mental health. I get nervous around people and I like to be left alone. I've literally tried over a dozen different meds in the last 20 years, yet nothing ever works. Now I'm in danger of being homeless because I can't afford to pay my own living expenses. The most I'm able to manage is donating plasma and beermoney stuff. I can't afford to get an apartment with that alone.

I just want to clock out of life. I'm tired of working so hard to help myself. I can't get any help quick enough. Everything is a long waiting game (disability, job help, housing) and I just can't go on any longer.",2.295283018867924,4.409624440251573,3.757836477987421,87.00052830188679,78.18238993710692,6.001006289308176,26.952201257861642,7.0316486544052195,1.3610306918238992,622,26,122,7,15,205,94,159,0.122,0.759,0.11900000000000001,-0.1066,5,2,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,4,10,4,1,2,7,0,10,4,0,0,1,17,21,4,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,8,0,1,0,1,3,1,5,3,0,1,0,1,14,1,21,17,3,20,0,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,10,70,16,9,0.1408783087172402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918148823122781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19160416170154976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541156269424664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576343282265283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471878481899704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455649520506008,0.0,0.0,0.1274324956701299,0.0,0.0,0.12661233998927038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22080930530098025,0.0,0.08006438938590599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619929329078727,0.0,0.0,0.1497470543997156,0.0,0.0,0.2832832822376045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625546535759018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795999670444389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483462438194188,0.0,0.0,0.1530646946256496,0.0,0.19901303142708535,0.06882602560100606,0.0,0.1243981276075863,0.12467287003291695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648404224353812,0.0,0.14197220025514376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703530734463783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976672810312146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498414223745701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14727659623143,0.16127195864118088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16191889183406066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564712412395114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661873530250942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20512217319741952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072101193711864
mentalhealth,JibbsWorld,2020/01/07,"Depression & Anxiety I have suffered with depression and anxiety for a while. I have been through it all. I have been through counciling, medication and been off work, honestly 2019 was such a tuff year.

I know i am not the only one who suffers with mental health issues so I thought I’d share these words. Whoever reads this, I hope it helps.

Everyday you fight, your winning. Every time you wake up the following day, you’re still winning. Never give up. When fighting mental health, you can only move forward. No matter how dark your life is right now, will it be like this the rest of your life? No, cause you are all strong individuals who will get through this.

Seeking help was the hardest thing i had to do. Admitting i had a problem was heart breaking but at the same time, i was relieved. I went to my GPs and asked for help. I got contact details, medication and time off work. 

My friends, family, my employer have been so incredible and supportive. They helped me through so much. Without them, I’d probably be still in a bad way. Never forget, you always have support around you. Even when you think you don’t, you do. People care. Don’t let the demons of your mental health tell you differently!

From one mental health warrior to another, stay strong. I love you all.",2.9045323970635195,5.600111053941912,3.5461618257261414,86.14789259495693,79.53941908713693,7.027194382381108,26.28167890201085,8.139509932561175,1.8955622725821897,1008,41,191,20,26,317,140,241,0.09300000000000001,0.705,0.201,0.9845,2,0,0,0,3,0,42.0,0,15,2,6,12,22,2,0,10,0,28,11,2,2,5,28,43,13,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,2,8,0,0,0,10,8,0,0,4,1,0,4,8,8,0,2,13,0,34,14,22,25,6,29,1,4,0,1,33,9,0,1,16,135,44,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169338853080707,0.10637768101399238,0.0,0.0,0.1029499924283311,0.1502144276634049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740076234072322,0.09178478095429883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819759616955923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010076355903487,0.10085761293963064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331779446418348,0.0,0.16912409065114545,0.0,0.0,0.10257690648873648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484677630884636,0.0,0.08272064498972778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255509825375267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585340485591248,0.0,0.05129484926968519,0.09418292959589952,0.0,0.0,0.07852328758622354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4174417870773671,0.0,0.11634343590024875,0.26323117575489424,0.0,0.0,0.09751461067290812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247411536930848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053957004163903366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039541125054227,0.13869447353009925,0.047965649874531266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861102667132831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19781146920964868,0.3957682455083109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043495001938663,0.07217338779128775,0.0,0.15144449877328486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305823262884348,0.14934019597576945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06806545293343527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585433916132432,0.09394472852833766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982062845919656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384494081977074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464651378027803,0.15681289567013318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22282635593919534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581339902609733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522624058641066,0.06290959754002792,0.0,0.07794372753795954,0.17174814541148428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779304884858724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910135801360626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946417424476156,0.0,0.1429520047856224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322451800522676
mentalhealth,nusalovescats_,2020/01/07,"I'm dumb to think i matter to people When in reality i know i don't. I wish i was good enough for people and not push them away or make them not like me anymore for some reason. All i do is sit here with my emotions build up and i dont ever know how to let them out but it hurts alot. Im so dumb to think anyone cares, they just wanna use me cause im valnurable. Im so stupid and sad and nothing i do is right. I dont even know what im writting here tbh just dont wanna feel so alone inside i guess",-0.9237356321839094,0.7041539827586227,1.709310344827589,100.02505747126438,86.75862068965517,4.211494252873563,14.839080459770114,4.7782277997778095,-1.2682160919540233,386,6,101,1,12,133,70,116,0.24600000000000002,0.7120000000000001,0.042,-0.9766,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,4,0,12,8,3,0,1,0,10,0,0,5,2,32,22,11,0,3,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,7,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,1,1,17,3,13,20,4,9,0,2,0,0,4,5,2,4,3,65,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809596838004148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223356437817818,0.09323168840598076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527363772850558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594502147743145,0.13697288481874947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4688066834624641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998514514618216,0.0,0.1377718151750085,0.0,0.08806722431092423,0.1206101193551882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741872910945779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118359790781007,0.0,0.0,0.14688472621951465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273903297257093,0.0,0.5761033944435645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198340700646228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634517713385289,0.0,0.06514127435727805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900286977562831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12793956629718892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18487690067318752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370916988792308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386828506853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17087275430565402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515956380653485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332991339343913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MuricanBeauty,2020/01/07,"If you're depressed without reason, will therapy actually help you?  Or is the only option medication, or natural remedies? (yoga, exercise, healthy foods...)",6.904999999999998,10.880016166666673,8.67166666666667,47.14000000000002,74.83333333333334,11.533333333333333,45.5,10.504223727775694,7.722600000000003,124,9,12,5,3,43,22,24,0.10800000000000001,0.622,0.27,0.6072,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,0,6,2,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.3348537490679068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955447502550687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4149245247130314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22999855253708476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3456760124478332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609723473029232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35280360285503337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3924088632293003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307733395957289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mhtalks_,2020/01/07,"I started a youtube channel on mental health :) I started a channel focusing on mental health in the hope I can help others :) 

[MHTALKS ](https://youtu.be/1OfwtbwpZos)",6.7521999999999975,10.746038520000004,5.255500000000001,68.51525000000001,83.8,5.7,38.25,7.1686216300943375,3.7756000000000007,133,8,16,2,4,39,17,25,0.0,0.608,0.392,0.8909999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,3,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.613145740404897,0.0,0.0,0.1933192592982709,0.0,0.0,0.28646230450452803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5813112664640017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4082848571618499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thrownaway9927452,2020/01/07,I've hurt myself and the only person I feel close enough to tell is my ex I've hurt myself twice in the past few days and I don't know who to turn to. The only person I feel close enough to tell is my ex but I know I can't because it's not fair on her. Who do I talk to,-1.1577272727272714,-0.04920586363636127,1.7515151515151537,102.09727272727275,84.9090909090909,4.4,12.515151515151516,3.1291,-1.7624666666666666,207,1,59,0,6,73,36,66,0.11599999999999999,0.884,0.0,-0.7044,0,0,0,0,0,4,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,10,10,3,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,2,11,0,7,10,3,6,0,2,0,0,10,4,0,0,2,37,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270186721289663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437956495512432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4305979031271064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21071336941558255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4461226573396357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229026257379468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169451926644221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19891000857181887,0.0,0.3638762921694742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16747761113264892,0.3642441220838932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266436098693595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rapturedmaybe,2020/01/07,"Has anyone dealt with a mental health experience similar to mine? What did you do? I read that OCD often targets parts of a person's psyche that they are most passionate about or important to them (I grew up in a Christian household and remain so to this day). When I was diagnosed with OCD I found myself having lots of thoughts about whether pictures, music, and words had demonic spirits in them. I wondered whether or not I was being controlled at times by evil spirits and I would feel weird compelling feelings towards random things. Like I felled compulsions to worship (or venerate I guess) random objects, usually artwork.

I began to develop negative associations with certain words (mostly based on names of artworks or songs) that would trigger me and give me great anxiety whenever I would read them or hear them. So I would try to avoid these words (even though most of them were pretty common and mundane).

Right now I'd been taking some medication and getting some counseling and things are better, but I still feel like I'm in a fight and I've had a hard time being creative with writing or drawing, because my mental illness is telling me that I'm going to create something evil, twisted, or distorted.",8.664306184012071,8.666194280542989,7.984355203619912,70.62081636500756,60.945701357466056,10.443589743589746,39.68363499245852,9.928628108626363,4.142818702865761,980,47,156,17,12,307,141,221,0.121,0.765,0.114,-0.6666,0,1,1,0,1,0,24.0,0,1,6,2,10,12,3,1,5,0,19,5,0,3,1,53,34,22,0,4,11,0,4,2,0,4,4,2,0,1,9,12,0,2,6,3,0,3,2,5,0,0,10,6,26,7,25,18,7,20,5,0,0,1,14,8,0,18,11,119,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802761488840153,0.0,0.0,0.09873946452146946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08608217905514304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489148815793398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15838246978270126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107075029153333,0.0,0.0,0.14332829732692792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093269903388288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381334827750572,0.0,0.0,0.2142047191722476,0.1008826480904087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15483284659378954,0.0,0.0,0.07377800267069969,0.13546444779919012,0.08025464405890358,0.0,0.0,0.1556879123163406,0.15556212121936794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649917699016625,0.0,0.0,0.15010289395692308,0.1591573971504391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797914975593545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005430546031035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14225731541694475,0.2846191293064842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529199977390298,0.0,0.0,0.12330180914129958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436644630026468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825025759920709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059519339267312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087127232060766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277294309536667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061746572631914,0.0,0.12342645066062953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18763138290486844,0.0,0.13874112796452567,0.11210740689042988,0.16468495779808956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587440759495408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555262502838787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15313955471677862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4012548639150151,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helloo12345678890,2020/01/07,I have fear of dying soon I don’t have any mental illnesses but just a few months ago I got this thought of how I am going to die soon and I don’t want ti day but I can’t escape the feeling of how I’m going to die soon...I’m pretty young and I really want to prevent this felling.Please help if you’ve been trough something similar and give me advice please❤️❤️,0.17999999999999972,1.8921105975609755,2.509939024390245,95.32393292682929,83.26829268292683,5.5634146341463415,18.78658536585366,6.6274283507984215,-0.09766341463414596,287,7,69,3,8,98,54,82,0.18,0.627,0.19399999999999998,-0.4223,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,7,1,0,2,0,14,16,8,3,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,3,1,8,0,6,13,1,8,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,6,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992449367769833,0.18074161535619454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865635914526656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314961348525042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6348359704081973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294398308438789,0.10309600886544762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955957454890801,0.23175773701054966,0.0,0.16307436007330892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666727685859545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20547934045277774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627479443325165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22381672002346067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20743566447003275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130621080852542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15696920103466214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187075045761462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405264384845799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cambodian_amnesiac,2020/01/07,"How do you deal with anxiety attacks from recalling embarrassing memories from years in the past. I'll randomly remember something really embarrassing I've done in the past, even when I was a kid, and I cringe so hard it makes me super anxious.

How do you all deal with similar experiences?",6.078962264150943,8.037231188679247,7.388820754716981,65.68813679245285,67.30188679245282,12.847169811320756,35.89150943396226,12.161744961471696,5.5217207547169815,235,12,39,10,4,80,40,53,0.233,0.7,0.067,-0.7761,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,1,5,4,1,2,3,0,4,0,0,3,1,9,5,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,5,1,6,3,1,6,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,4,26,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317455742826627,0.2705043813491926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724029393620761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4937139901124838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24503508468967555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15815098104476538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342228845789576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21449543974613333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983121167892972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4571541629842201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15339442065378855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271244193788638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18433624569667986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15419455087461276
mentalhealth,cosmonaut96,2020/01/07,"Looking for a bit of advice Hey everyone, first time to this subreddit. 

I’m currently in a coaching role in North America, and we work with athletes ranging from grade 8-  university. Recently a young woman in grade 8 disclosed that over the holidays she was admitted to a mental health wing. Prior to knowing this, I noticed marks on her wrists back in the summer of 2019 when we were first introduced. 

Would it be out of line to send in email of support to the family, just letting them know that she shared this information and what a wonderful person I think she is? I would offer support in anyway I can, however I’ll be going back to school at the end of the week which is out of country. 

Just wanted to know where to draw the line, because I don’t want to come off as being nosy or stepping over boundaries. 

The team I coach with is more than capable of handling this in my absence, and knows about this as well. 

Thank you all in advance.",4.794096989966555,6.011662891304352,5.4495652173913065,81.20145484949835,69.54347826086956,8.705016722408027,30.45819397993311,9.057496981413335,2.5548926421404685,748,30,142,14,13,242,121,184,0.0,0.868,0.132,0.9651,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,2,1,1,5,9,5,0,0,12,0,13,2,1,0,1,26,29,7,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,2,10,10,0,0,8,4,0,5,1,0,1,2,2,2,15,5,39,21,3,35,0,0,1,0,19,17,0,2,13,105,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595050347941126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510253350951338,0.0,0.0995025996091841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17820328387295614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406069292443507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14457203278636818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559718597363288,0.0,0.0,0.15387733537523338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776842161499383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927665377691617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17350429928136438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35882453510269746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16691223561537089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13707085883751505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16449597103226254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18583676841924027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252486032231496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16116848579857476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16519599128693072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3704596132488733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502789041381725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459025403925104,0.0,0.0,0.09517987112606473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19255283752745694,0.0,0.13093208459625022,0.0,0.14676205548987062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17701438282076076,0.11883231717096307,0.0,0.0,0.2319057353311039,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaysssmh,2020/01/07,Text based help. Are there any good text based belpmlines out there that have intelligent people.,6.120000000000001,9.900041000000003,3.017500000000002,87.67750000000002,76.5,5.7,20.5,7.1686216300943375,0.6363499999999997,80,2,13,1,2,21,13,16,0.0,0.602,0.39799999999999996,0.8225,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4697320221267043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5793662743513912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4629935237956213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.478877379353274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clumsyfly,2020/01/07,I finally separated from my wife. Today was the day I separated from my wife and her toxic family. I've been in DBT classes for the 3rd time in 3 years. I have support. I am safe. I am on my way to happiness! Time to love me again. Thanks for listening!,-0.8771226415094341,1.2556649433962264,2.8012971698113245,86.77854952830191,97.67924528301887,7.178301886792452,19.83254716981132,8.07648339933343,1.483266037735849,194,7,43,6,8,71,37,53,0.0,0.708,0.292,0.9508,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,2,9,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,10,5,9,7,0,11,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,7,28,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20506075216472172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29974856555261425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34831448999206005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3384790471960665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28697531133351883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3608222659813445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927389263557925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3708152311053407,0.0,0.3013931000880949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523853637150415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20475866740332432
mentalhealth,PilotSB,2020/01/07,"pyromania? Hello. Im a usual 20 year old male, I don't drink, I don't smoke and I do a lot of sport to keep in shape. So Id call myself a healthy person. Id also like to excuse my grammatical mistakes in advance as English is not my first language.

But there is one thing that is making me question my sanity and how healthy I truly am. And that is the fascination with fires Ive had for my whole life but only started noticing lately. Let me tell you everything from the beginning. 

As a kid I always enjoyed when I got to put things on fire and that was fairy common as me and my family used to live on a farm where my granddad would burn things all the time, and out of 4 kids (there were for of us) Id always be the one volunteering to take care of the fire, and Id stand there and look at the fire, oh yes Id stand and not only look at it but even try to play with it (trying to put my shoe in and get it out super fast so it wouldn't catch on fire and games like those). It would be kinda ok if it were only those kind of games but it got to a point where id burn a stick and run after my other 3 cousins. Id also catch bugs and put them in a pan and fry them above the fire... I know it all sounds terrible. 

In recent years it has only been getting worse, while I stopped burning bugs and trying to burn my cousins there is another type of behaviour Ive been noticing. I would (and still do) buy a lighter and sit behind my desk and watch a movie, and I am a very energetic person I can never just sit and do nothing, I always have to be doing something. So the thing i'd do and still do is burn those little stick notes and then just stare at the fire. And the thing is that when im looking at the fire it makes me enter a trans like state where I just stare at it thinking nothing and I could do that for hours and hours. Its getting dangerous to the point where I once almost burned my apartment. I threw a still burning piece of sticky note in my trash can full of paper and it semi caught on fire. And I cant seem to be able to just stop doing it. 

Now Im coming to reddit as I dont want to assume anything and just seek professional help which is expensive and would also make everyone in my family know im going somewhere for my mental health (and that just doesnt put the best light on me does it). Also as far as im aware there is no cure for pyromania, so it doesnt make sense to start visiting the doctor to me.

Im sorry if my English is a bit off and terrible to read and understand, and Id like to thank you for your time and advice!

​

sincerely PilotSB",3.589529837251355,3.698193667269443,4.9539168173598584,87.68696925858953,71.64014466546112,7.911320072332733,24.84159132007232,7.6583078777640585,0.9832699457504526,2010,50,461,22,35,674,240,553,0.09699999999999999,0.8,0.10300000000000001,0.5729,0,0,3,0,0,0,46.0,1,3,2,4,31,17,1,0,28,2,49,5,1,6,3,83,79,59,0,10,14,3,9,4,0,5,3,1,0,5,32,39,1,3,7,6,2,14,11,4,0,3,10,17,48,13,64,58,8,78,0,0,6,0,23,31,0,8,32,306,80,6,0.06743948532283849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590108454220599,0.0,0.0,0.06753090293735108,0.0,0.0,0.21572532818983595,0.1683451627593937,0.07307065417137615,0.08194635628676131,0.0,0.07071618051804388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05549695020414465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07077357916071697,0.0,0.07362645129897734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688632547011029,0.0,0.06875904989271975,0.0,0.0,0.05809314510549825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05384494142942152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902717088359991,0.059016748072687725,0.0,0.0790385745352884,0.0660650211361732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04454314401880068,0.0,0.0,0.06444131828162386,0.06061026088505068,0.0,0.12715188960376236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057363991764129374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057030428572236,0.0,0.03832741365251826,0.0,0.1078750342538063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168501928566988,0.0,0.0,0.0452032654485592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282861678635471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4370773009346987,0.0,0.0,0.05994331321211525,0.0,0.07022784609613178,0.0741259548770477,0.0,0.07607467690138042,0.0,0.0,0.06896144290752612,0.04763450290604626,0.13179010411502287,0.06759208128197601,0.05955030108871365,0.0,0.16989654780835695,0.0,0.0,0.057334638762660026,0.0,0.0,0.18006552051672212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796313926919081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05201348859336628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12942001004048168,0.15356060205190145,0.07076639530381333,0.07182085088212381,0.09139748120470753,0.20516307011046106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777111464338128,0.0,0.0,0.12750422399626876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27118123864114546,0.07554765781285445,0.0,0.06745773540533724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658835579617224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06139437458798044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0519182105966709,0.0,0.07549298246693223,0.0954680296412622,0.0,0.16157178028186014,0.11276485894029807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050706100015270365,0.0,0.05894508268780067,0.0620892173046648,0.0,0.0,0.2240189870355268,0.043212499107808056,0.0,0.0,0.07864901245144372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13736095107038018,0.0,0.0,0.07020688260226565,0.0811213972385591,0.058246062322421285,0.07427506530438584,0.055644638225605725,0.03977755574022473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529377696008292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872659706038964,0.19162830175993445,0.0,0.08194635628676131,0.08685763491505698
mentalhealth,_Haddock_,2020/01/07,"Am I getting a psychosis? I'm diagnosed with OCD, Depression, Anxiety disorder, obsessional and avoidant PD, and a possible schizoid PD. 
I've first experienced potential psychotic symptoms three years ago (first obsessive thoughts, than slightly delusions and hallucinations at night, because I was sure that a ghost is watching me and depressive symptoms) when I was 16 years old.
Now I'm often unsure if sounds that I hear on the street or at home are real or not. I sometimes experience delusional ideas like ""my food could be poisoned"" and I also have concentration problems.
I've been to a metal health clinic a few weeks ago and they found psychotic symptoms (paranoid perception and magical thinking) but didn't diagnose a psychotic depression or schizophrenia. I didn't get any medication there and I'm still depressed and very worried about myself, so my question is if anybody of you has ever experienced a psychosis and remembers the time before the first psychotic episode.",9.53875,10.612334422619053,8.872714285714283,61.372285714285745,58.94047619047619,12.672380952380955,45.96666666666667,12.161744961471696,6.3774123809523795,805,49,114,25,10,255,114,168,0.154,0.8009999999999999,0.045,-0.9176,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,1,3,9,10,1,2,10,0,13,10,0,0,2,32,22,19,1,4,7,0,0,1,0,0,9,2,1,0,2,11,1,1,7,0,0,0,3,8,0,4,7,5,13,2,8,13,1,19,0,4,1,0,4,4,0,7,16,76,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215838410763158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735907937306217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279047451562545,0.0,0.09313425395192304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421435281283227,0.0,0.10359565229401886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720312344319199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41943363904795256,0.2471363281607737,0.0,0.0,0.13952981138843515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012492308673172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190895390713382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31066757756353386,0.14721400327736334,0.13348662441230466,0.0,0.0,0.1272130138927346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940877255454056,0.13721496544979775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211971852686924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743478764303774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05947824168253218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264483441800995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142490208625017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277504344091955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137248697147972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649310043384345,0.0,0.0,0.1363817679670529,0.0,0.0,0.13857196074309813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791285199195116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040848126492187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097225361607769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474280551102688,0.3796176340315039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800899719745905,0.0,0.0966515803761014,0.07099023105098548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045201080746023,0.0,0.0,0.09765614123561886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236375086839093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15679900812407088
mentalhealth,Caswerty,2020/01/07,"Today I told my dad what my psychologist told me. It didn't turned out how I expected. (English is not my mother tongue, sorry if I misspelled something)

It turns out I not only have PTSD, depression, anxiety and TOC, but I also have ADD (attention deficit disorder) and a severe case of dyscalculia. My psychologist said I can't keep going without therapy and meds (I wasn't taking any because my dad thinks I'm faking it or exaggerating, that I would become a drug addict like my mother, also, so many medications are expensive) so after a deep evaluation they will give me some.

Anyways, I went home and explained to him the reason why I was struggling so much in school and all he said was ""You have ADD because you *don't want* to concentrate and you have dyscalculia because you don't try in maths, you just need to work harder"" like if it was my fault.

I've been doing after-school math classes for 5 years, I've tried really hard to concentrate but I just can't, and he thinks I'm just a lazy person even after my teachers telling him how they see me working hard.

I don't know what to do.",5.810672629695888,6.093690539534888,6.666511627906978,76.72381037567084,66.86046511627907,9.778175313059037,30.957066189624328,9.661875296680813,2.7807889087656528,866,31,165,17,13,288,122,215,0.152,0.8170000000000001,0.031,-0.9706,0,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,5,2,2,12,6,0,1,5,0,21,3,0,3,1,37,41,19,0,6,11,4,2,2,0,2,3,2,1,1,7,11,0,1,6,0,1,2,10,4,0,0,11,5,32,2,14,28,3,11,0,1,1,0,23,5,0,4,6,108,39,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371227178501923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011782392881037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553717845389015,0.0,0.09622412900836826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23002959135811316,0.13891813173793774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833725208942364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441589318843397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586907159714668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307889816417909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066311483913125,0.07148573289729956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22535484355049015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261712318655713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118022655039989,0.0,0.0,0.06912739089492086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290305141232535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752485345243125,0.0,0.0,0.1397172517308985,0.1267137693006116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246543738610208,0.09326696430209268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566411500703187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098294098414966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14703432675226408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058021118972472,0.12932651595934458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23929806348910646,0.0,0.0,0.2545994879797673,0.100233264039474,0.0,0.0,0.14209969361310942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683437992627268,0.0,0.14080447037670266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149635563294196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457363220012666,0.0,0.10994043257997133,0.0,0.14384453759069185,0.0,0.0,0.16119413624157225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922816921529072,0.2403832884730722,0.0,0.17079764974072828,0.273632929124217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419044109610352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660268075114455,0.11350015736967188,0.0,0.0,0.1212509261129345,0.0,0.1831439544717939,0.0,0.0,0.08935307844776617,0.0,0.0,0.08100053066352629
mentalhealth,SymbolTheClown,2020/01/07,"Emotions As People (Pixar’s Inside Out) Apologies for being away, the holiday season was very chaotic.

By the title, you can see what I will be talking about. 

If anyone has seen Pixar’s movie Inside about, it’s basically an insight on the emotions controlling Riley’s life. 

Now, I love this movie. I feel very connected to this because of the structure. I never knew how to describe my feelings and emotions and dreaded the question “how are you feeling?” Because I didn’t know. 

Well, because of this movie, I thought it’d be a brilliant way for me to learn my emotions by color coding and picturing them as people. 

For example, I have Ace and he is very hot headed (Anger) and his skin is hot red. Does this make sense?

The movie makes a lot of sense and I try to picture the different areas in my head. It’s like they are all in this and they are watching my move.",3.5571935756551127,5.4067507928994125,4.339158918005072,85.45350591715977,73.61538461538461,6.4853761622992385,28.63947590870668,7.1686216300943375,1.6170114961961108,680,28,128,7,14,218,103,169,0.043,0.855,0.102,0.8388,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,3,2,6,5,1,1,10,0,15,5,3,5,2,26,26,12,0,1,1,0,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,8,0,1,9,1,0,1,2,2,1,0,5,11,19,3,21,16,2,11,0,0,5,1,11,6,0,3,4,88,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953381457481324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810404419741092,0.0,0.0,0.2493506129342513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15292660398020588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245531802878572,0.0,0.0,0.11931962170655995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6134955130592363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068259214829048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798661012237204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493365174639367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630708320168924,0.06661306273731345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159187456316128,0.1230599792625582,0.0,0.18202756414151924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449170358622029,0.0,0.0,0.10516048385036496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18905397084616848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274169189979742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086522202516706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095918793899562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824559713143887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925717826109551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3375057453979073,0.0,0.10822721118629752,0.0,0.0,0.1225938103983369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suburbanbeat,2020/01/07,"Independence Blue Cross same as Blue Cross? Sorry, this is only barely related to mental health, but it seemed like the most appropriate place to post?  


I have Independence Blue Cross insurance, and am having a hell of a time finding a therapist near me who accepts IBX. There are, however, many who accept Blue Cross. Are these used interchangeably, or are they two completely different providers? Thanks in advance.",6.944047619047617,9.80243035714286,6.3228571428571465,70.51047619047621,66.85714285714286,10.380952380952381,31.666666666666664,10.504223727775694,4.051523809523808,335,14,51,10,6,103,57,70,0.092,0.732,0.17600000000000002,0.7805,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,1,5,1,0,4,0,7,1,0,3,0,12,10,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,4,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,0,4,3,4,6,10,2,10,1,0,4,0,3,3,1,3,2,32,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676709041855282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667278957907557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333340930139928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27136558630403057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472375410029235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588280483015213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572763084759783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941625926980454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667278957907557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24450108437344786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23241007147454384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857807342889875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350404174391689,0.0,0.29641601339360074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886398573087575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24938514452705354,0.0,0.0,0.2204920499363615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wolfwolf0202,2020/01/07,"how you deal with panic attack? i get some panic attacks sometimes and it's really driving me crazy i called my father the other day during a panic attack wave and i sad very bad things sometimes it get worst to starting getting to suicide (getting rope etc) if you was wondering why it's because career crisis + meeting random terrible people, btw i had major depression before . i just want it to stop this panic attacks",3.7783860759493666,6.508703594936713,5.139731012658231,75.80174841772157,76.34177215189874,5.975316455696203,27.59651898734177,7.1686216300943375,2.0261000000000005,340,14,49,4,8,113,59,79,0.514,0.474,0.012,-0.9951,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,2,0,0,2,13,4,4,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,11,9,4,1,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,13,0,0,2,0,9,0,4,7,4,4,0,2,0,0,6,0,0,4,3,32,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5685506723119307,0.0,0.0,0.10431996099534628,0.0761624685848263,0.0,0.10631502282673727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757805124056545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057618004340078,0.12880799931234962,0.10761092749125706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393415000532605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611046733405235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5863622530716865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661789685998073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003997790538553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471383721371099,0.0,0.08843341220418457,0.0,0.0,0.10445571454953374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666444789448615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300480693492482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308886121665342,0.07369304669779951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127392191457143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549246375070814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,okchinmayarawat,2020/01/07,"Help for and from seafarers! I am a trainee engineer and this is my first time ever on a merchant vessel. The vessel had been berthed for the last year and is practically dead. No system works, the machineries have been overhauled and their parts have been kept scattered around. Is this how bad every blue collar job is? I have been undergoing therapy since the last year and have been diagnosed with anxiety. I am having panic attacks on a daily basis and all I want to do is run away and get back to my home. At times I have been suicidal and the thoughts inside my head are making it very hard to be at peace. There are constant voices inside my head telling me to quit, get back home and choose some other line of work. My contract is for ten months and this has been my very first week. I do not know how I am going to make it through. Please help me. Please.",3.9761674208144773,5.490630652941178,4.22529411764706,88.06074660633486,71.88235294117645,7.34841628959276,24.84162895927602,7.882392219407189,1.1880497737556561,681,20,139,9,13,212,100,170,0.132,0.7879999999999999,0.08,-0.8906,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,5,7,3,1,1,8,0,29,3,2,4,2,25,38,12,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,6,12,0,1,3,0,1,2,2,3,0,3,10,3,16,0,18,27,3,23,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,1,14,101,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430635873847748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137922318827744,0.0,0.15511629515274528,0.12810406304105176,0.2096874206338855,0.11384544349777173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14734447265756573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839102912530224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333517740380955,0.11487963447440275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319562167426488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14247310415079034,0.0,0.07749009086504959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12214162599895642,0.0,0.27986614239101004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827832777219321,0.0,0.27353766480549563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530501524034866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749336627688624,0.2222847272317287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820275909171145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883220691659294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15997578534916426,0.0,0.1476523216673087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993397880985669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450235931880806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278902815396655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14914331382485818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917474669531798,0.0,0.15592658613932772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082456130539741,0.15901201099981752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250038633625199,0.08042197776883038,0.0,0.10937067801065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19852691017090945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17560814520154405
mentalhealth,princess-cuddles,2020/01/07,"I’ve become extremely “soft”after a traumatic experience, and I NEED to get my strength/toughness back!! I used to have the thickest skin. I could get through anything, no matter how bad things got. Even throughout a very long traumatic experience, I  was the only thing holding everybody together through it all. 

I moved far away after the incidents, and came to a dance school in an entire new city. My thick skin still lasted for a while, but then it just BROKE. Now I am sensitive to everything, my confidence feels demolished, even the slightest criticism from my teachers feels like it breaks me (even though I used to train with an extremely strict, and abusive teacher in the past, IT NEVER got to me). It’s been 3 years now at a terrible school and my dance skills are falling apart as well I have no social life. Im aware that I cannot blame my school or the circumstance because it is in fact just my fault. But I NEED ADVICE!

I don’t know how to toughen up again, I don’t understand what happened to me but I absolutely hate it! I don’t think I can survive this career or life being this soft/over-emotional!",5.203613707165111,6.469003411214956,5.4683925233644874,81.26741744548285,68.62616822429906,9.258068535825547,31.556386292834894,9.558583805096642,2.8884707788162003,886,37,169,19,15,281,132,214,0.192,0.74,0.068,-0.9843,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,2,14,7,1,0,13,0,14,4,2,4,3,30,30,15,0,3,7,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,13,6,0,1,5,2,0,5,7,5,1,0,5,5,25,2,21,23,1,29,0,1,0,0,1,9,0,2,15,115,38,4,0.0,0.15691367473272466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941383021461095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898262055988127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442692754047835,0.10183424660387756,0.1105775914724224,0.08073107252292616,0.14626391807076494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15147021958474202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573847390326377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14897141270613568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26241596404603285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902392905867427,0.2590934462431281,0.0,0.0,0.13392610726214782,0.09461150343411333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138383515602909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21184054047511905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711172540239195,0.0,0.0,0.13075202412603734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14305239437447473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278274557689887,0.10795210156509266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870853420475167,0.06470099193505832,0.0,0.0,0.11720069970744355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407573167075053,0.0,0.1963975681896505,0.10214194240430906,0.12790643060099052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072269260067762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642407654240728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4020935012390649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350006803878652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576266478830416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175967696765279,0.08485892245226015,0.13011659540404613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786937875305855,0.0,0.2287624269745031,0.0,0.10927264420162963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190748602740311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528371950040428
mentalhealth,TheChancellkr,2020/01/07,"I have a superstitious problem that stems from paranoia, and OCD This has been happening to me for years, but I'm hesitant to tell anyone because of how stupid it sounds. Just by me writting this right now its greeting triggered. I think that if I look at someone for too long I'll become like them, that if I do something while thinking of someone I'll fail. I compulsively type things over, and over again. This is literally happening right now as I'm writting this. Deep down, I know this is all a load of bullshit, but I cant stop out of fear that if I do something will grow wrong.",4.66,5.678097931034486,4.916724137931039,85.63818965517244,69.6896551724138,7.868965517241381,30.87931034482759,8.07648339933343,1.9966413793103448,464,19,95,6,8,146,76,116,0.226,0.7040000000000001,0.07,-0.9677,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,6,6,1,1,2,0,9,0,0,2,1,17,17,10,0,4,6,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,12,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,1,2,11,1,16,15,1,16,0,1,1,0,2,8,0,3,8,65,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664440460422706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127846246237553,0.23162448238296396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359986234407017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3709177647515344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525922451020247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246090740828896,0.0,0.0,0.1855997826581116,0.17611594912859296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20067823862321665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3582075397898254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3553981591323963,0.3229126802483896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17533926159898375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833086543183094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933178878628322,0.2687662719259472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22930106449530085,0.0,0.13505584730348744
mentalhealth,PBJ_Sandwiches,2020/01/07,"I Feel Like Such a Burden (long) Let me start by saying that l've recently been diagnosed with chronic major depression/anxiety and chronic major PTSD, through my problems started when I was around 7 years old.

I became a ward of the state when I was 12 years old under the care of my maternal grandparents. I had court mandated therapy, but they never diagnosed me with anything so my grandma just thought I was going to be okay after a little opening up. She was wrong.

I never did well in school, it made me anxious. I've had so many bad experiences relating to school and other structured environments like it that I seem to always find a way to set myself up for failure just to get away from it. After college I jumped from job to job, abandoning ship when everything became to much. I was just hoping that the next place would be different and I would be happy.

Now I'm engaged, I have a great job and my wedding is literally 250 days away. Everything should be good right? Nothing has gotten better, my psychiatrist ordered a month leave from work to get used to meds and relax and it was working- I thought I was finally going to be okay. But now I'm back at work and I'm already right back where I was before my break.

My psychiatrist thinks quitting work would be best and my fiance says he can make it work- but I see the look on his face when we talk about him being the sole income. He's so worried. He says he cares more about me being okay and being happy, but I feel so guilty. I feel like I'm using him and I feel like others are going to think that too.

We're training our puppy to be my service animal and she does help- I just cant take her to work yet. And applying for disability is possible, but they almost always deny on the first try and take 6 months to do so. They also require a 6 month leave of no working.. which means no income. So that's going to be at least a year of one income with a wedding and two cars we have to pay for. 

My fiance already budgeted it out, he can do it. But I feel so useless and so guilty that I just wish he had met someone more stable than me. I wish I didn't exist. I don't know what to do.",3.8224832066140095,4.825884006864988,5.110030265003324,83.53409684801065,71.63157894736842,7.927039196870156,26.453753598582715,8.259297600419973,1.6325298442459584,1689,54,342,25,31,563,216,437,0.124,0.721,0.155,0.9595,8,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,3,0,3,12,30,25,0,0,15,3,43,5,1,4,2,64,82,34,0,8,11,0,5,4,0,4,4,3,0,0,17,23,0,2,13,1,2,6,7,6,1,3,19,10,53,19,49,47,7,58,0,2,2,0,26,18,0,3,33,237,70,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353592241146457,0.0,0.16207773341516246,0.05872704312376902,0.12220989491289767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056178626414250726,0.08296220171944726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060431880024925576,0.06537394379802823,0.0,0.0,0.13799178471515527,0.11293607992868615,0.061316306278714997,0.0,0.0,0.06248894688489778,0.0,0.07706694564371946,0.06494850657206998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14974655862924835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04736038709341971,0.0,0.0,0.14907275104496714,0.0,0.07672538248154102,0.0,0.0,0.06426466726316732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13199975856731944,0.07183486678046108,0.0,0.0,0.18565819037688788,0.15738888444235805,0.0,0.08044596004904844,0.06711951698717873,0.06246494366426986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767349506680969,0.0,0.16694233863263344,0.06159494778063063,0.0,0.0809638634738883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563487749751407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04922285466631248,0.0,0.0,0.07293889099920348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21862281442170686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04035871156329099,0.0,0.0,0.15551703700344685,0.0,0.07509366963055451,0.0,0.14350921502992278,0.07360254088993769,0.0,0.06498888159572141,0.06166806017289265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948727431445452,0.04901935102948979,0.074452958675398,0.0,0.07999374175986297,0.08157125836840116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758486434044305,0.0,0.053984185844824506,0.0,0.11327732031362685,0.0,0.0781004186855205,0.0,0.0,0.07046418308412697,0.0,0.15411824596001386,0.0,0.04976238872970338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672538248154102,0.0,0.0,0.08278847959526013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026869375567216,0.08584319336336063,0.0,0.0,0.07810862503016351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250956158363478,0.0,0.0,0.12542852721427047,0.0,0.17519866045559535,0.0,0.14864306559980375,0.058519283601567926,0.06685371836935804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062222402829368875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039572894055344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043003052898748,0.05902537707554178,0.0,0.0,0.08398089566843832,0.0,0.0,0.0941101286486634,0.0,0.11660055878256835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0498584786170523,0.0,0.07173666834631746,0.0,0.0,0.1268509003556028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05829037685698235,0.0,0.0,0.06602812111781782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16889641574259456,0.0,0.0,0.3742378929812539,0.07457820422040973,0.0,0.15650128293633336,0.08029114860392161,0.0,0.14187185475401592
mentalhealth,amongstbunnies,2020/01/07,"How to calm down during an extreme emotional reaction? I work downtown and park at a lot that is a 10 minute walk for my job. i have been going to the same parking lot for 8 months. The lot was full. I never seen the lot as full as it was this morning. Theres three ways to enter the lot and i didn't go through my usual entrance bc it was blocked with cars. I enter the other common way, i would've left if they said they couldn't fit me in but i thought it was worth trying since i was running late. A man, not the usual parking attendant, told me to stop. He then asked, ""where are you going"". This use to be a common question i use to get from the lot attendants to see how long you'll be there .. i said ill be back at 9pm. He gets frustrated immediately and says he doesn't care and asks again, ""Where are you going?"". I asked him what exactly does he mean by that. He rolls his eyes and walks away relieves a sigh of frustration and walks back to my car window. I asked him bluntly, if he is the parking attendant. He clinches his fist and puts it near my face.. and asks me again where am i going. I ask him if hes the parking attendant yes or no. He throws up his hands, forms the hand sign for choking towards me. He then tells me to go forward and talk to the other guy. It didn't click at first but i think he didn't like that i was searching for a parking attendant so thats why he wanted to teach me a lesson. He perhaps kept asking that sarcastic question ""where are you going"" bc i didn't wait for him at the entrance yet i always search for the parking attendant instead of them walking all the way back to me. I left and parked elsewhere, I had a panic attack bc he scared me therefore i started crying so i had to call my boss to tell her im going to be late bc i need to calm down. I was really normal until i parked, i think because he sort of reminded me of the whole domestic abuse i witness through my parents and a previous partner i had. My question is if theres anything i can practice any self-soothing techniques when dealing with intense emotions.",2.103554996857324,3.777962413953493,3.5415021998742944,90.37114707730991,77.18604651162791,6.230043997485857,25.342551854179764,7.001395882987947,0.9739258328095536,1618,59,347,17,37,532,208,430,0.131,0.818,0.051,-0.9903,2,0,0,0,1,0,44.0,0,4,3,3,19,11,3,2,25,1,32,5,4,6,3,55,66,28,0,8,8,1,2,1,1,1,1,3,1,3,15,13,0,4,8,0,1,26,9,5,1,2,21,9,61,5,46,39,12,71,0,0,4,0,53,21,0,15,24,233,76,4,0.0,0.08856027588608507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06219359824932835,0.0,0.0,0.05082897559442708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061508539392830686,0.0,0.4891335916302588,0.08503291433080695,0.0702251288768307,0.1724222376906109,0.0,0.04556369014611336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763227204183373,0.0,0.07620722784554224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210356984453251,0.0,0.0770585286698276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654096118852055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681555088282411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357782426196203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810206688967508,0.0,0.33983319426373443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740090283542951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073712844688374,0.0,0.07417260551595549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16863060920547546,0.0,0.16242072319105888,0.0,0.0,0.03651649676570312,0.0,0.0,0.06614672888014893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3812717499539373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814189168728003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059660525788463675,0.0,0.0,0.055422265942906716,0.057647739206121075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323395995539854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08769682925448788,0.08299517083561987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513909250057227,0.2511935918744061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047883384301297634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421986982588888,0.059440004755544174,0.07483250829478769,0.0,0.05956186799355999,0.0,0.07797504860927569,0.0,0.0,0.0618296082885878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05290470053169661,0.0,0.0,0.062489936318503525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060076978070683774,0.1306603669996078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578680247682407,0.0,0.05933896198616988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142178713372223,0.0,0.05074676139181298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911088647780725,0.1646415078080704,0.0,0.04408637493048057,0.17798664908249612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744548783563845,0.08344981533486857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054415049457890496,0.0,0.0,0.05309650757485187,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AudienceSwavez,2020/01/07,So anxious I'm shaking Out of meds hoping this good Rx thing works it's also my first day of work and my truck battery keeps dying this new year is going to be the end of me,1.6153846153846168,2.57811258974359,3.3979487179487187,93.85538461538464,76.94871794871794,5.2,20.69230769230769,3.1291,-0.3867846153846153,137,3,32,0,3,46,35,39,0.098,0.76,0.142,0.4438,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,3,2,3,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,6,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,2,5,5,0,8,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,5,19,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22297902942999676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3149968095582661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17982129843083305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893799340374704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469592667457552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23717135702377945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15846464703078267,0.2338680945500818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769395879241897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478355585412527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3097155765536568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692942770877985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18524124810830175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40598089891431866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179556395110928
mentalhealth,fractalpanda,2020/01/07,My partner needs to see a therapist ASAP. But its becoming a nightmare to find one in a hurry Hi all. My partner is really struggling and needs (and wants) to see a therapist right away. She has been having suicidal thoughts and sort of break from reality. I don't want to take her to ER as they might 5150 her which might be way more traumatic for her. She doesn't have any history of mental issues so we don't have any idea what to do. We are in san francisco USA and navigating medical system is a nightmare and we have never uses mental health services before. We have been calling a lot of doctors to book an appointment but they either don't pick up or don't have an opening. What other options do we have? Is there an easier way to find therapist in a hurry. She has insurance through her school. I would really appreciate any advice. Thanks in advance.,2.6595693277310914,5.109639291666667,4.418879551820731,80.98298319327729,78.70238095238095,8.000560224089638,25.95378151260505,8.841846274778883,2.367329411764706,683,27,126,17,17,230,98,168,0.05,0.8809999999999999,0.069,0.7299,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,5,0,2,1,2,2,0,1,10,0,26,3,0,2,2,33,36,10,1,5,4,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,2,5,11,0,0,4,1,0,1,6,1,1,1,3,2,18,1,21,29,4,14,0,0,2,0,18,8,0,6,1,96,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832596319391942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267909606057309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233809809771722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14503440734132866,0.11174502283312136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13409405246627853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441323844247485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240051155673837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958873682142206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482461198241147,0.0,0.1370656485680802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164494172901952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322927122801289,0.2646826032981537,0.2786229637647201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947466284328778,0.10128332589951393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898692556099494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682559796497637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121479424457288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290448621282122,0.2092926512037445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13728586591378694,0.0,0.14364453342904815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873751197674854,0.0,0.0,0.12090330030114807,0.0,0.4574235530023788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042546942542711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341971231127128,0.0,0.0,0.1549137829619484,0.2084739723597087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328710813101083,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Eveflowers,2020/01/07,"Coworker with self harm scars? I’ve noticed huge horizontal scars on the inside of a coworker’s left arm.  They’re very red in color usually like they’re scabbed instead of scarred, and just the other day their seemed to be some blood smudged around the edges.  

I’m extremely concerned and want to reach out, but have no idea how to go about it since we aren’t close friends.  For all I know, they could possibly be not even even self harm scars.  But I would hate myself if I didn’t try to help out on the possibility that he’s going through something hard and needs support.  But then again that’s really none of my business.  He might feel uncomfortable by random people coming up to him about his scars, especially if they’re self harm scars like I suspect.

Our relationship at work is very casual just coworkers, small talk, we say hey and bye whatever.  He’s pretty social and has other coworkers that he’s a lot closer to and they hang out outside of work as well.  It’s probably safe to believe that if he is going through anything, then he has emotional support through his actual friends.

I’ve been diagnosed with severe depression last year and received a 51/50 earlier this year on a suicide attempt so I could see how I might just be overly sensitive to seeing another person struggle, even if we aren’t close.  

I guess I just want to know from some unbiased opinions if it’s inappropriate for me to reach out to this coworker or not?",5.937621339751304,6.836078913357401,6.173399518652228,78.21166766947456,66.72563176895306,9.910068190934618,32.35639791415964,9.994966539143718,3.1414518251103085,1157,47,218,26,18,370,158,277,0.14800000000000002,0.7020000000000001,0.15,-0.7425,2,0,1,0,0,1,22.0,4,0,3,3,16,15,1,1,8,0,17,4,2,2,1,59,35,22,1,11,15,0,2,2,2,3,2,1,0,4,11,20,0,1,6,1,0,6,7,6,1,0,2,7,21,9,39,25,5,32,0,1,4,0,30,18,0,15,11,135,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.10695480886188986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492625098799307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090192320647214,0.0975681659841257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348284476175175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441159471802696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175015030727586,0.0,0.0,0.0706836063505563,0.0,0.09439921864890187,0.1112427526370552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232864226702797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171713677887116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055417581019644585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16935498952723466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18686639728906235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073790656306445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981810076387778,0.10820834023502092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734632695425685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372623805881505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046773500091013,0.08933947916539305,0.0,0.0,0.1190818550595256,0.0,0.0,0.10709106793028916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317888828939333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23253877527659075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126778542070932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12478151509314805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598356389278096,0.09569940416385588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24711741863636424,0.0,0.11150366409561918,0.1181684628009226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021323531996908,0.0,0.0,0.11767050427473702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715914930031385,0.0,0.0,0.17467568404163236,0.09977667418489528,0.3430133761623487,0.1238179830909282,0.0,0.09066311623237706,0.0,0.0,0.11172446203423957,0.0,0.08437623833993703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457880818946554,0.0,0.11988575323236768,0.24874793193632666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809316760167324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441191451526387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071006571322593,0.18086467939880568,0.12929107090345454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854450116618957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15958173083564114,0.0,0.0,0.07785743709265272,0.0,0.0,0.1411589579265279
mentalhealth,Thowaway123200112,2020/01/07,"Psychologist Not Returning Calls or Emails I have been contacting psychologists(10 in total) by email and voice mails over the last couple of months looking for help for my son.  I have just been googling, reading some reviews, and then reaching out, but it seems they never respond. One did respond and my son went there a couple of times, but said he would prefer to go to someone else. 

​

 Is there a better way to find a psychologist?  Maybe I should be going through his primary care doctor. Confused, anxious, and frustrated.",5.990744680851063,8.57832036170213,5.311648936170212,77.90875,68.78723404255321,7.67872340425532,31.96276595744681,8.472884824447931,2.7518340425531918,430,19,69,7,8,130,74,94,0.098,0.7909999999999999,0.111,0.09,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,1,3,4,1,1,4,0,9,1,0,0,2,19,16,8,0,3,5,2,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,5,0,0,3,1,0,3,2,2,0,1,5,3,7,2,12,8,2,13,0,0,1,0,14,3,0,4,6,49,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20720758681545626,0.2323765529000959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160458551636068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691355262172698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952765989121693,0.0,0.19498110372159666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4232050614981391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19574141857199545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597558073214373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747891587388295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173712821344107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12818360059849512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588546747675733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16059275815012833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921254746819648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15264530013377053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474954559460694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12958862717324018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19129094605602934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18191226684224726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17409697978867858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203634849356058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115131119345192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15179677075667142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17728064879462915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358508365071349,0.0,0.2323765529000959,0.0
mentalhealth,albafreetime,2020/01/07,"No idea what to title as I'm a fairly happy guy, good relationship etc, just get real negative and quiet sometimes, want to be positive or smiley more often.

Absolutely fine at work, just sometimes when I'm home I can be an ass and can't help it, and have no excuse.

I'm good at finding positivity in others but just as good as being negative with myself/actions I feel.

I don't know the point in this post, maybe I feel like I need to open up about it, if there's any advice I'd be glad to hear it, if I significantly reduced me being a moody piece of shit then I'd be a damn good guy I know it.",2.791657986111112,3.479236585937503,5.259791666666668,82.68381944444445,73.765625,7.876388888888887,23.597222222222207,8.167268648758528,1.1457680555555556,465,12,103,7,9,166,83,128,0.18100000000000002,0.601,0.218,0.3181,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,7,11,2,0,5,0,10,2,2,0,0,22,21,12,0,4,7,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,1,2,7,5,0,0,6,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,0,4,8,8,15,15,3,10,0,0,0,1,6,7,3,4,3,66,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15703448420354366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928172224667312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792233261676199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250981166714146,0.1148043344120139,0.0,0.0,0.14687717308126058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083959279927573,0.0,0.0,0.5391511865518963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182371466580172,0.0,0.1710684694546702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811209300357561,0.0,0.10771403116263106,0.0,0.1611955148098164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18141109080613288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17663337668983808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851005475327022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16144506216399254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11915724450913465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15191373699019947,0.0,0.15390647643557692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182912135891262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725319937880944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16495656009439716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178734336944398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947852071318097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699174046600608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwitaway7133,2020/01/07,"Dealing with multiple/conflicting diagnoses? How do you all cope with the confusion of multiple diagnoses, particular when different doctors diagnose different disorders?

I have had anxiety for about 8 years. After my GP was no longer able to help, and I developed severe depression, I saw a psychiatrist in April. She diagnosed me with BP NOS. I have a family history and am knowledgeable of the disorder but it didn’t feel right. Tried some meds and some of the antipsychotics did help.

Saw a new psychiatrist in October who thinks it’s just GAD and Depression, not BP. Last week my counselor recommended I get screened for ADHD. So I’m back to the doctor in a couple weeks for an evaluation.

I’m grateful I have the support of healthcare providers, especially since that’s not the case for anyone. But anxiety meds haven’t been helping and I am desperate for Ana curare diagnosis. It’s also confusing to know what the accurate diagnosis is when I’m hearing so many different disorders t town around.

Can anyone relate? Any advice? Thanks!",4.345506912442397,7.507698758064518,5.8180491551459275,69.12564516129032,77.54838709677419,11.06973886328725,32.513056835637485,10.504223727775694,4.994570199692781,843,44,132,35,21,283,119,186,0.125,0.762,0.113,0.6251,3,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,0,10,6,0,2,12,0,14,6,0,1,1,24,26,13,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,6,9,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,7,5,12,2,21,19,3,16,0,2,3,0,8,6,0,4,10,86,18,2,0.11108782833373128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350598202041133,0.10855374016551234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883689618355797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554353263088785,0.0,0.16996376922909448,0.0,0.0,0.15535038498321252,0.0,0.0,0.09889171920431028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541968294622014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291656912700985,0.0,0.0,0.11452667316190368,0.19135956753050667,0.4510072295132847,0.0,0.3481894103092206,0.3819488264056695,0.2274061989878109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472371798950283,0.0,0.05616934382130803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05803880532334441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520405614955832,0.0,0.22337948910353328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061050965254525476,0.09055140678693108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262562200629615,0.0,0.0,0.2467870686410532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728931683679094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486839842342464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549762612391727,0.0,0.09189299954760566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606115114279368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227474720926644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118059486634369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542134344203902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17821591034961914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715369192894045
mentalhealth,unicorn6642,2020/01/07,"Does getting plastic surgery when you have BDD actually help I was never diagnosed with BDD, but I suspect I do suffer from it. I am diagnosed with anorexia, I will forever hate how fat my body is. But I am also extremely preoccupied with my facial features, and it feels like less to do with wanting to be skinnier and more to do with just hating some of my natural facial structure. Whenever I look in the mirror I want to cry. The thought that this is the person I have to live as until I die is devastating, and it's even worse to think that it's not something I can change (unlike my anorexia, where I actually feel like I can have control over how skinny I am and knowing that I can actually appear as my goal weight one day if I put in enough effort).

The only way to change it is plastic surgery. I don't want 50 different face jobs, I just want to slim my jaw a little, slim my nose a little and maybe plump my lips a little. I say little for everything because that's really what I mean, I don't want any dramatic changes, I know that probably isn't the best way to gather info but when I use apps like facetune for example I barely use any sliders at all and the sliders I do use, I do so very minimally, and the results make me so happy and wish I would actually achieve that face in real life.

My question is, with my situation, will getting plastic surgery actually make me feel better about myself, or will it be a waste of money because I still won't feel like I'm pretty enough afterwards? I genuinely feel like I'd feel better about myself, but what do I know, that could just be my disordered brain speaking.",7.33437307692308,5.972525858461541,8.089413461538467,73.24427403846154,64.26153846153846,11.078846153846156,36.3125,10.125756701596842,3.520050000000001,1284,52,249,24,16,434,160,325,0.128,0.73,0.142,-0.2947,2,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,0,7,15,12,2,0,11,0,33,15,11,9,2,61,63,24,1,9,10,0,7,5,0,5,4,2,0,1,16,14,3,1,15,0,1,2,6,3,0,1,2,11,46,9,30,52,7,21,0,1,1,0,7,10,0,5,12,173,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.3940739920729745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458758472157207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984567276827838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846694999011443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475767919229554,0.14285981202637227,0.0,0.08971149031989999,0.0,0.09016023198699703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563153613681628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09058459545624327,0.06448412424414991,0.0,0.08871634496642135,0.052086617189222084,0.0,0.0,0.16394915230965762,0.083821115618569,0.08438203045363055,0.09256346272239904,0.0,0.07067782440051909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16690326501766264,0.0,0.05334439144851465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258619825048877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24502267021922056,0.2307935689691419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439255347721453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597563586283975,0.0,0.15947704667330612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05413494579146199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014660593287216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13315867258226713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05704656968989495,0.19728801866750134,0.3237902058465994,0.07131680176891969,0.0,0.06782209437375272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782226787550413,0.0,0.08113910132423889,0.08797654876343655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229079597426425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05472832152052759,0.061425272978778415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052071176444967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216684132017853,0.08707811900859587,0.0,0.0,0.08119093558741919,0.09047506457304297,0.0,0.0,0.091928028820346,0.051740001657388734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422741394416658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078302380863908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621766920674991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06449887694464708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05175082537735892,0.0,0.06411823300110712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092645782401698,0.0,0.06663942182134308,0.23818587024032786,0.12821468452849594,0.0,0.09834977332379463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287553893999442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230623538756825,0.0573729996325665,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jane0m,2020/01/07,"Favorite Apps/Practices/Activities for Positive Mental Health Hi everyone!

This is a little question post about what all of you like to do to improve your mental health/wellness in little or big ways. For instance, apps, exercises, and just general things you do that you think help. Open to any and all suggestions :)",4.9906060606060585,8.232620090909094,4.9340909090909095,76.0144696969697,75.36363636363636,8.03030303030303,30.984848484848484,8.841846274778883,3.2796666666666656,255,12,39,6,6,79,43,55,0.0,0.7190000000000001,0.281,0.9516,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,2,10,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,8,4,2,7,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,2,1,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588901763644402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22326281852481125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4967185612740014,0.0,0.0,0.15661083167891127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414970582153985,0.4683578480198598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4709289764284896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22377234437502508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617417437447996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15522683825320566,0.14971364030988912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854606861047593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,User43433,2020/01/07,"My husband is hearing a voice Not sure if this is the right subreddit, let me know. My husband has experienced sexual trauma multiple times in his childhood and it has had a lot of effect on him. Ever since we got married and moved because of the military it’s gotten worse. Last night he told me that he hears a female voice (that he calls his demon) in his head telling him to hurt me & do bad things to me. He says he can’t control himself and feels guilty and cries after he does anything that the voice tells him. And that it takes over his body and drains his energy. For some reason this only happens at night when he’s in and out of sleep. He also says he doesn’t know what’s real, he’s suicidal and says he doesn’t care what happens to himself because it’s not really him. He’s also had sleep paralysis in the past and nightmares about his childhood.

I’m honestly really scared because He listens to the voice and it has control over him, it keeps me up all night. I have no one to go to and he made me promise to not tell anyone. I’m scared to say anything to anyone in case he hurts himself, he cares a lot about his reputation.

With him being in the military I’m not sure what kind of help he can even get for this without getting kicked out. Does anyone have any experience with these symptoms or any advice for what help military people can get? I don’t feel comfortable going to talk to someone on base yet. This is all very new to me.",4.2900508474576275,5.094800064406783,5.122499999999999,84.60815677966103,70.38983050847456,8.069491525423729,27.631355932203395,8.238735603445708,1.7064881355932195,1149,38,235,16,20,374,144,295,0.122,0.809,0.069,-0.9493,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,0,0,3,8,14,0,2,10,0,19,5,4,5,5,42,44,16,1,1,7,2,2,0,0,0,1,11,0,0,20,16,0,3,6,0,0,3,10,6,0,1,6,14,28,8,39,36,5,31,1,2,0,0,51,15,0,5,13,146,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912838851033192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14587962395450846,0.0,0.09882492373125536,0.0,0.12405050835655712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19132638055909654,0.0,0.15011448668240607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615571316409521,0.16680049693483473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131264800102123,0.0,0.0,0.09313459652025913,0.0,0.18598732797833487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20459731972009246,0.0,0.0,0.10018881413595757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15963523779248615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06024269058935945,0.08250377094443098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921991296812395,0.0,0.0,0.09223603149634188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14295882891683173,0.0,0.10367236406951844,0.0,0.07294817703175213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16131165182994853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360675758924317,0.0,0.20559836524384534,0.0,0.12227095298422787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952822622870904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107075848113318,0.0,0.09498014781670397,0.10025217264443648,0.07434751628048254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932673918554196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508527649389853,0.0,0.0863041701695489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09694074264221857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809022977428119,0.0,0.25678043036021064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061805585372891686,0.06936856179152318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706932012170251,0.06323284293060792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381582105138112,0.11686165410462493,0.09377805264752376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789199579069192,0.0,0.29013226099523715,0.18263226018236906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754490352204448,0.0,0.18254975919432773,0.0,0.07728109779990336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976785261687568,0.0,0.17192682415673333,0.09480108421940428,0.06857782407375056,0.07331034693340506,0.23916208361672325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059521311035795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05318470694694547,0.0,0.0,0.08715411729292713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525698505177647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792223039669839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294977292624686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,k3l9sw5r7,2020/01/07,"Need help. I want to cut my fingerprints, because they make me go insane. Since 2 months, everytime I touch something, I panic and want to erase my fingerprints.",4.029885057471262,6.88813520689655,4.048965517241381,83.2509195402299,76.24137931034483,8.004597701149425,26.90804597701149,8.841846274778883,2.4985080459770117,127,5,22,3,3,39,23,29,0.25,0.586,0.16399999999999998,-0.5859,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,5,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,7,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,10,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333993165290411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21759880241449864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566355381035446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555745215148874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30561014479154186,0.0,0.0,0.283899722566009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4492256870355235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.316721237229415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947587476619895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4516635831742413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CountlessSea744,2020/01/07,"Idk what happened I'm not feeling so good. I don't know how to describe it, but it's like something in my brain just switched over. I feel like my outlook is just broken and like I can't do what I want to in life. I was thinking about what I wanted to do with my life, and I just had the thought ""I'm not good enough"" my brain just like broke. I'm normally optimistic and happy, but now I'm just confused. Please help me idk what's happening.",2.4604511278195496,3.372223736842109,3.4902255639097786,94.21157894736844,74.78947368421052,6.69172932330827,26.203007518797,6.868970318607317,0.8209849624060155,345,12,82,3,7,111,53,95,0.141,0.552,0.307,0.9715,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,9,9,0,1,1,0,7,4,2,1,0,23,20,7,0,3,9,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,2,12,7,8,17,1,4,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,5,50,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4343963583240748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20103700078801626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19675517927797065,0.1389968222065888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3263827189253887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441052532348585,0.20711738590468906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304123935332918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069274874561601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27485313183028204,0.3802172863197361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19063176911073626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135732476855479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497851547822897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246689898015788,0.0,0.1544623738427846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22951820854136915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gavalonn,2020/01/07,"I don't know what to do anymore My life is a joke. All my life i have been the overly anxious and fatigued friend. College is a hell because of my social anxiety, and it takes all of my energy. I don't show up half of the time. I am so desperately trying to graduate so i have a chance of having a future. I had to quit my side job because i couldn't handle it anymore. 

Everyday I am constantly worrying about everything.  I lost all of my friends. I am so depressed because i can't do anything with my life. I have so much anxiety i literally make myself sick every single day. I cut myself and i can't stop. I can't go a day without crying. I constantly get to hear that i am not good enough, but i'm trying my best. I've had counseling for years and i keep on spiraling downwards. My anxiety and depression are ruining my life, and i don't know what to do anymore. 

I just wanted to get this of my chest, as i have no one to share this with.

I'm sorry if there are any grammatical mistakes, i'm dutch.",1.0275062062739764,3.0182990853080582,3.763642518618824,85.9750552922591,81.8436018957346,7.241796434213495,24.73956217558113,8.269060116576782,1.6969050327239903,781,31,166,17,21,276,107,211,0.19,0.7090000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.9227,1,0,0,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,0,3,7,14,2,0,7,0,26,7,1,1,3,24,40,13,0,4,5,0,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,7,8,0,2,2,2,0,1,10,8,0,2,4,1,35,6,22,35,7,15,1,5,0,0,5,5,1,1,9,122,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564393258349491,0.0,0.28903266275520034,0.14227704022873278,0.3746977276505125,0.0,0.0,0.10363839010059453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23031667832138036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216689888169586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721941135040122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383398449092562,0.16244254757186133,0.0,0.2169449234108029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301303148034961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611039457888824,0.0,0.11318729837580455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19460280369942795,0.0,0.13159754004690832,0.0,0.07157495020996463,0.10563300734118784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14194421905639784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497662115085277,0.11194179960785236,0.0,0.0,0.13842732978780525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3558223056412953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374790515389717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406633423247532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258083828504564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534061580376555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13395333965711945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838059046484074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098020049723292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529198809577406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469166421815174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343698170337025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710108126573241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428303400257256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140225255735228,0.0,0.0,0.12789880140761264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110162285881269
mentalhealth,helpnsns,2020/01/07,"hospitalised from a failed attempt. i want to see my friends. the hospital aren’t letting friends visit me, but i really want to see them. they’re only letting family see me and i feel horrible when my family see me because they feel like it’s their fault. is there any way i can get the hospital to allow me to at least talk to some friends for a few minutes?",1.5208561643835594,3.9123370273972635,3.3249143835616444,87.47723458904112,82.83561643835617,7.485616438356162,25.56335616438357,8.472884824447931,2.04015205479452,285,12,58,7,8,95,49,73,0.129,0.667,0.203,0.4588,1,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,3,2,2,6,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,1,0,8,14,3,0,2,1,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,6,13,4,8,12,3,4,0,1,4,0,8,1,0,1,2,38,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124562628342381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165940165435866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3453548201484326,0.0,0.1852336223892255,0.1308574695334604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4245526095143725,0.0,0.09569933897917303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746097173502072,0.0,0.08948814651088004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930987459151767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734409621176566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5838546017892374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472259907628836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21607811966332086,0.1453926922606164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mister_Andrew_,2020/01/07,"Feeling like a husk, and tricking oneself. I'm not sure when it started. What I do know is that I've felt like this for a long time.

To summarise, I've just felt *empty.* Like I'm just a husk. The fact that I can put on such a convincing smile, and a cheerful tone of voice, concerns me. The days just feel the same. Get up->go to school->go home->pass the time->go to sleep->repeat. Even the things I liked have become tiresome. Sometimes, I spend hours *deciding what* to do to spend my time, instead of actually doing something. I can't even find the motivation to try something new.

Sometimes I just feel like crying, and I don't know why. I just *feel* like it.

I've always been an introverted person, finding interaction with others to be *very* tiresome. The only moments when this doesn't  happen is when I interact with my friends (the only 2 that I have), but lately, even then, I have my doubts.            

When I laugh, when I smile, am I *really* happy? Or have I just gotten so good at lying that I can trick *myself*? Whenever I laugh or smile, it doesn't feel whole. I feel like there's something missing, like staring at a child's half finished drawing. There should be *something*, but there isn't...

Paradoxically, I am very good at speaking in public. I have participated in various contests (even on a nacional level) based around public speaking. I don't know why or how I am like this. I dont know how I can switch between a vocal, charismatic persona, and my ""regular"" one.

""Which is the ***real*** me?"" I wonder...

I spend most of my time daydreaming, but I don't know if I should call it that. I create all of these stories in my mind. I create characters, settings, entire worlds. In these stories, I am God. I can freely change each and every detail. In my mind, I feel like I can make a difference. But, despite this, these stories are only in my mind. I would like to pursue them further, maybe place them onto paper, but my doubts pile up. ""It's not good enough"", ""No one will like it"", etc.

I feel like a **coward** for not doing things, and an **idiot** for trying and failing.

In the end, I feel like my feelings of self-doubt are what destroy me more.

I don't know if I'm overreacting, or if this is an actual problem. Honestly, I think i just wanted a place to write down how I felt. 

Thank you for reading this, whoever you are.",1.1188534798534808,3.713598663736267,2.6167307692307697,89.80868589743591,88.73626373626374,5.143223443223444,21.649267399267398,6.742157984588678,0.6866256410256408,1812,64,355,24,60,588,202,455,0.065,0.7090000000000001,0.226,0.997,0,0,4,0,0,0,135.0,0,2,2,2,26,35,4,2,24,0,41,0,0,5,3,79,73,29,0,8,22,0,13,14,1,4,0,3,0,2,27,11,0,0,25,1,3,1,13,9,0,3,5,17,60,26,37,62,9,41,0,2,1,0,15,21,0,11,32,250,87,4,0.0,0.0,0.1300273799488088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055435035652510026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05930791296026905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357902316825495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802874968779886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047748973912381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318139566847075,0.04296582938577288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960605467091055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808076202729136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900752476389811,0.06883857692875094,0.07430140166015957,0.1760134288113475,0.0,0.05613210550661536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33686203265483994,0.33316456078086204,0.1919033770957103,0.0,0.12178302975599158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051472172695665314,0.0,0.03480736751399182,0.0,0.11358885261225378,0.16763870693125327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058913821469542986,0.07092060688826007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682753270910027,0.0,0.06560948042578332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196830247824021,0.0,0.0751527817697135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4556756161293069,0.0,0.0,0.05895858057718295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044470858499950895,0.0,0.06693098865198648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018083933136011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06434416871019252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902898998596238,0.15200763312347498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817196495651065,0.1392121093418211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374848037267875,0.0,0.06697374631659064,0.0,0.0,0.06664026288496,0.07583068771228813,0.042679909036038764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742525756115253,0.0,0.0,0.06950151979200016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667034774289014,0.0,0.0,0.20515620228811432,0.1317821858296244,0.0,0.047155560101262345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279066706770163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061336802053051136,0.0,0.0,0.08852170383465792,0.042688837435129606,0.0,0.0,0.1553918415408893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046424732419957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10994064052732698,0.03929551971351822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202324074507114,0.07438134500175468,0.0,0.0,0.07224897081786806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04732652352153413,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AtlanteanDoll,2020/01/07,"[Trigger warning] i discovered last weekend that one of my best friends i neglected for a year killed himself We had our last conversation on January 23rd. Throughout the year I was wondering why he didnt write to me as he used to. He usually always iniated conversations. I had some thoughts for him but was living my life. I was depressed a lot and to be honest  as much as I loved him, talking about how depressed we were didnt help me at all. I was trying to live a more positive life and be able to feel happiness again.

Anyway, I was bored on friday and I went on his facebook (I had unfollowed him due to negative and depressive stuffs), only to see ""remembering"" and a bunch of posts of his friends saying they miss him, they love him and wished he was still here. I'm super confused and talked to his sister to find out he killed himself on january 31 last year.

I feel guilty cause I didnt really help or listen to him as much as I could have, and didnt actually think it was this bad...
Now I'm at loss. I am so sad and no one to talk to.

Sorry I had to get it out of my chest and didnt know where to post it.
Also sorry for my english.",2.92775894538606,4.16638266101695,4.523333333333333,85.9848493408663,74.08474576271186,8.125800376647835,26.24670433145009,8.680891452615391,1.7405252354048961,892,31,193,17,18,300,128,236,0.209,0.65,0.141,-0.9345,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,3,0,2,3,10,20,2,1,5,0,22,5,1,4,1,36,39,20,2,2,2,1,2,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,6,14,0,1,8,1,0,1,7,12,0,2,19,5,37,8,35,17,8,24,0,7,1,2,36,9,0,5,12,138,43,0,0.11431663885713332,0.0,0.11155654915115673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141897479258547,0.09512060124413843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544961843651127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996825970441573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11743467807371515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912725340978566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953822606135113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560385487368267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448333689488848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664150321267527,0.0,0.05972572555758213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216921877726804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532480666692187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529488469525492,0.0,0.06282543507749715,0.27954995492131096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16149044553889733,0.0,0.0,0.20188737297752268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718791835464348,0.2063504595762632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16807176600208598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549278260549219,0.08694295515588593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21896747997494326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732341660967133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294984671282149,0.0,0.0,0.09090917955310407,0.0,0.0,0.09109556054400847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25593623591897696,0.0,0.0,0.09129341546012903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308652014751954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275650152228139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324948627608494,0.0,0.09075464196009124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761349384273986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873287198868057,0.12590362716804454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597266950995844,0.10315298575282923,0.0,0.13145849298754325,0.0,0.12397151841923006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22084850221729235
mentalhealth,SuicidalMarshmellow,2020/01/07,"For those who have experienced (or are still experiencing) mental illness, how would you describe the feeling in imagery? (ex. feels like being trapped in a cage) I’m going to be animating a video about mental illness and I would like to generate ideas to implement into the video. Thank you for helping.",3.6221428571428578,6.823137351851853,4.681534391534392,75.23833333333333,82.8888888888889,6.789417989417991,29.936507936507937,7.957251820313856,2.7876063492063494,243,12,38,5,7,79,41,54,0.142,0.677,0.18100000000000002,0.1027,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,6,2,0,1,0,9,11,3,0,2,1,1,2,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,3,9,7,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,3,28,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907093105584108,0.20537030080616334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633771585446278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19268665328892906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245212864065083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2808889340906309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5794090193635415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295757861702455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646659122752879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084242120028043,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,smart-homosapien,2020/01/07,"Achievements don't make me happy at all Hello everyone! Hope yall are doing great.
So...I have been feeling pretty dissatisfied with life recently. Whatever I do or achieve, does not make me happy, even though it is objectively a good thing. I always want more. I want to do better, but when I do better, it doesn't feel good. For example, I recently passed the cutoff in an exam that placed me in one of the ""scholar"" batches that are made for good students and receive more resources. I had been trying for two years and studying like crazy, but now that I made it, it doesn't make me happy. 

This does motivate me to always try to do better and improve, but it does take a toll on my mental health.",4.986731549067317,5.731991452554747,5.764184914841852,80.8486780210868,68.78102189781022,8.424655312246554,28.360908353609084,8.515128840125781,1.9979657745336576,547,18,105,8,9,179,83,137,0.083,0.66,0.258,0.976,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,6,4,12,0,0,5,0,15,2,0,6,1,21,26,9,0,3,5,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,10,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,5,2,14,12,12,21,3,12,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,6,73,24,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212478936522584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3387660945539457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3351992446877005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843310230779911,0.0,0.0,0.12200311448356793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911705676894514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212742063706151,0.0,0.1407669617910448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4077512069338257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357172051702163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681442858365324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018371855796498,0.06237769333751943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24162662374779856,0.2556809229693722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286707795871741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651884893319634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13339777180551204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12989582603646985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25213595910528097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599900017784656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482450344155057,0.0,0.12544433776814806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17337182919166752,0.0,0.12472419692990178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15061720698023096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222133142902713
mentalhealth,confusedclassroom,2020/01/07,"I’m tired of living, and I just want it to be over. I’m depressed, have been for a while, and just recently hit its peak. I can’t take this anymore, I’m so alone, and so confused, I just want to sleep forever. I feel like I never learned how to live life, or to meet people. And I have just kind of accepted nothing special is gonna happen in my life for a while, because I don’t do anything. I feel uncomfortable all the time, I don’t know where to meet people, and even if I did go out with the hopes of meeting others I’d just have an anxiety attack. I feel like all my friends are lying to me when they say they care. I have run into money troubles, and I’m working off $100,000 in debt. I just want to die, just grab a shotgun and blow my brains out. Can’t say I will, because I’m a big ol pussy, but can’t say I won’t either.",2.054854981084489,2.6286503661202225,3.892349726775958,92.22889029003788,75.39344262295081,6.72366540563262,25.005884825556954,6.67199483983844,0.6551642707019751,639,20,155,5,13,217,103,183,0.138,0.7759999999999999,0.087,-0.8191,1,1,0,1,0,1,26.0,0,0,2,1,13,12,1,1,7,0,17,5,2,1,3,37,36,16,1,5,11,0,4,2,1,3,3,3,0,0,4,11,0,0,6,0,2,2,7,4,0,0,2,7,21,8,20,29,3,17,0,1,0,0,9,9,0,4,8,98,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15958376490120624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787325488720518,0.0,0.15280916812648634,0.0,0.0,0.12679737565965304,0.0,0.0,0.17529192675147715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18785542277305856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17200785135453833,0.0,0.0,0.15709812966617567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271166661540235,0.0,0.15991407384321887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017705251268401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337273435789188,0.22015419121011606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904432701602015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756905467930251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625529798889427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303942155051098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604539808127059,0.08468011766503854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21766709475461246,0.15055457352365775,0.0,0.272116643167435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188384916338988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14784702195899654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21364383188580927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15213860821878686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675995245505103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15419451449821509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585141864952447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984717484819252,0.17709601486231927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726468567802157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217443196927797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lunamoeller,2020/01/07,"Someone to talk to? Hi r/mentalhealth :))

I feel kind of lonely and I have really been struggling lately. I am a 19 year old female and I was wondering if anyone on here would like to chat - about anything, doesn’t have to be serious mental health talk. I just need some genuine human convo I guess...

Would mean a lot to me. 
Thank you in advance. 

Wishing everyone who reads this, a wonderful day :)",1.333947368421054,3.9802697631578963,3.0555789473684243,86.69205263157896,88.21052631578951,6.197894736842105,22.07368421052632,7.554174236665415,1.348088421052632,306,11,57,6,10,101,61,76,0.08900000000000001,0.733,0.177,0.7966,0,2,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,1,3,6,0,1,3,0,9,1,0,0,0,15,17,3,0,5,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,1,8,3,9,12,2,7,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,6,5,38,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363132136256736,0.0,0.15727050147826332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325269088624485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18261757456564665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663295827327192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21053356844960386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031451978904295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990157753290755,0.0,0.0,0.21558486623258494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336862515777604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16247825073467195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20817912460289764,0.0,0.0,0.1925979167428995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170857646667784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005419475538777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911656737308976,0.0,0.12243249369727735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161930234374988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19979380166104654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072203164549976,0.0,0.17595205332865727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21977161715607074,0.0,0.41450986490267344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715237414340123,0.0,0.0,0.12307112147657034
mentalhealth,dylandarko16,2020/01/07,"I've been so drained and out of it that I might fail my uni course. TW for self-harm, depression and suicide ideation. Also sorry this is so long.

This winter holiday has been rough on me to put it bluntly. Hell, the whole of last year was too. I was stressed out of my mind, scared about the direction my life was going in, my self-esteem was at the lowest it had ever been at the time and I started relying on cutting myself to cope with my feelings. I was worried about my exams and my future at university and that continued until my exams actually happened and I was suddenly more worried about not getting into my universities. 

During the revision period from Jan-Apr I got scared enough to go to a doctor about the state of my mental health. I originally started cutting in places I could cover up but as it became a more impulsive habit I was doing it anywhere and everywhere I could for the rush, the feeling that wasn't just emptiness and self hate and worry. My doctor ended up telling my mum and she was made aware that I had a suicide plan as a last resort of sorts if everything failed and it got me the motivation to quit. So, for a while I did. 

And things got better, I got a girlfriend, came to terms with my sexuality and things about myself I wasn't comfortable with and started joining in more. And then when I got into my uni I was the happiest I had been in forever, I felt like I finally did something worthwhile, something my parents could be proud of. 

But I relapsed about a month into my life on campus, and because of the availability of cigarettes and alcohol in my area I started obsessively chain-smoking and drinking to stop thinking about it all on top of cutting. I stopped going out and put in the bare minimum in my work. Then the winter break started, I was thrown a tonne of coursework and left to go back to my parent's house for a few weeks and I was just so drained from everything I had no motivation to even touch it.  It didn't help that my girlfriend and I broke up and I felt distant from family the entire time. I still handed in something, but nothing worthwhile and I was scarily ok with it, I didn't care when usually I'd be miserable and disappointed about it but it barely phased me. 

Then New Year rolls around and I get so drunk at a friends house that they find me carving into my arm with a nail I'd found somewhere in their house and now many many close and old friends know that I'm not ok when I'd told them that I was doing fine and I hate myself for it. I barely remember anything but see the scratches and cuts and some concerning messages and want to just end it. 

So instead I start trying to heal, I stop cutting and smoking and manage it through a sobreity app that counts the days. I'm trying to manage my drinking but today I fucked up with a deadline on my coursework because they put the wrong date on and I misread it and because of the way they mark it I'm probably getting a zero for 50% of my module because the reason is so pathetic and stupid they won't believe me if I tell them. 

And now it feels like everything's gonna crash, the urge to cut was the worst it's been, I'm now more anxious about the whole thing more than ever because I don't want to fail and now the department probably thinks I just don't give a fuck because of the state of my work recently and it kills me. 

I haven't relapsed yet and when I get back I'll probably try to talk to a doctor on campus or something and see if there's anything worth doing but I just can't believe I fucked up already, and at this point I'm pretty certain if I do anything less than perfect I'm on thin ice and might not get accepted for a second year. 

That's pretty much it. Sorry the structure is terrible I just needed to vent this stuff since I can't turn to anyone on campus rn.",3.8064983003673016,5.089696921976593,4.8934255013346135,84.00850363881095,71.97789336801041,7.7371934387333745,28.70579243948623,8.20500826718156,1.9265070654529688,3019,117,602,45,57,992,306,769,0.193,0.708,0.099,-0.9976,3,0,8,0,0,3,49.0,0,0,7,13,42,42,14,5,42,2,50,16,2,5,5,117,103,75,3,10,21,3,10,2,4,4,8,0,0,1,39,60,4,3,15,4,1,10,14,28,0,2,40,12,90,14,100,54,15,113,1,7,2,3,23,43,4,9,58,433,129,17,0.0,0.0,0.055690881378915834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609891529780946,0.0,0.0,0.0629768001595955,0.04563786993856812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447145932257846,0.0,0.03990380669154072,0.0,0.14088819055174506,0.05080329922515933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776471371621006,0.0,0.2087315329843296,0.0,0.0,0.1285939086448718,0.0,0.05047268409876199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527146270398278,0.05818540831407685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13669429293772867,0.0,0.0,0.03680463158777559,0.0,0.04915324279459836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523689444055598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181132479532307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109197196416454,0.05896728863631249,0.0,0.03769338038222464,0.10324392854145384,0.0,0.0,0.1538691757574502,0.0,0.053799351692937536,0.0,0.08656704538241228,0.04076993639210075,0.1095899260013092,0.06251604144387399,0.05215981639233234,0.0,0.0,0.06257295408601443,0.08818237097564857,0.15827745812451285,0.14908036877288516,0.0547455585743007,0.12973397488614355,0.0,0.2282155194387486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05046571951739154,0.0,0.0,0.11268717890038092,0.0,0.060661427457868435,0.0,0.0,0.03825198953967082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19754907431125196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06313813190600061,0.0,0.03136350020776338,0.09303731902468686,0.0,0.0,0.06200537904812545,0.0,0.08061871144964278,0.0557618308546409,0.0,0.0,0.05050406027539474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0539998443453925,0.0,0.11571753876347145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05751189137799648,0.1210818801672547,0.057623183146616484,0.0,0.04555174294320339,0.0,0.04195210794340895,0.042315765377470255,0.0,0.05511736787244411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05475901819445205,0.0,0.05988406780041504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12673621753975364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596247118946508,0.0,0.05394842821830448,0.0,0.0,0.11611889912275385,0.18458933958938376,0.0,0.0,0.17210961090290058,0.0,0.0606996552285844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05867619416340857,0.05634851960590485,0.0,0.06464778470170224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142715769460564,0.0,0.09095283235282142,0.0,0.17860550120664534,0.0,0.0,0.047207871298802974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17573729056563833,0.0,0.12776761798016026,0.2423613892695186,0.0,0.045575188635291405,0.1431361261788298,0.06537207632692689,0.0,0.06533008117800368,0.12484793032367802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0458697107629149,0.09976123025690176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113741852900281,0.07313471924881014,0.0,0.0,0.06655451042628065,0.0,0.054094515380151184,0.054531649613597626,0.0,0.11623783395654867,0.062074427505037326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285318091266995,0.0,0.06732127119534226,0.04529852851713522,0.0457771201321235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743047388720016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309347973017105,0.1738683000243956,0.0,0.0,0.062395734610396776,0.0,0.11025123879575406
mentalhealth,XThrowaway011999,2020/01/07,"I think I'm becoming addicted to excercise. Now, before you dismiss this as a flex, I actually don't know what to do with myself if I don't excercise for at least an hour and a half a day, even if I'm sore. 

A little background, I've recently quit watching porn for good (hopefully) and it's been about a month since I've quit and since then it's been hard for me to adapt. What I've realized is that I enjoy running and going to the gym more than I've ever in my life to the point where I'm almost late for some of my classes because I will go to the gym in between some of my classes. 

I'm also starting to feel even more lonely than I have before even though I feel my confidence has greatly improved. Is my body trying to compensate for the lack of stimulation which porn provided? 

I've had several injuries in the past and I'm worried that I may take this too far. I don't want to rest. I've gone to the gym almost everyday for the past 3 weeks with little rest and I always want more. How can I stop feeling this way? I am at the point where I'm starting to feel depressed whenever I don't go.",4.980897435897437,4.2908048675213735,6.356495726495727,81.54961538461541,68.7008547008547,9.764102564102563,31.24786324786325,9.265573868473778,2.4520786324786332,865,31,189,15,13,296,118,234,0.091,0.843,0.066,-0.3544,0,2,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,2,12,6,0,0,14,0,16,6,1,2,1,30,38,13,0,6,2,0,5,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,10,8,0,1,7,3,0,5,4,2,0,1,4,6,21,4,32,32,9,33,0,2,1,2,1,12,0,8,15,123,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.12290171543917723,0.13729591800975716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25222644866319804,0.0,0.0,0.10071617409459058,0.10479425148469043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677338083255021,0.13909359969073715,0.2143355877864627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989372905481054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122249542915401,0.0,0.10847409323174406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24955150618772756,0.11392220424822025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547212545290527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21472808029062726,0.10563459615950556,0.0,0.13885205410088866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281974500028608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12508932262535266,0.12402799620474488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921470593156111,0.0,0.14206862897891576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895691438462583,0.0,0.25245494844520383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052610428039736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240452739483608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238112746974306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679107088789578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243530278306153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227918020726218,0.0,0.20836187976193005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828550359845827,0.0,0.0,0.10529357178484633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469308846852983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069887054475958,0.12373786968769496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550669240920883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14856830257648018,0.09996729668807387,0.10102347911902987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790072512410625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Somekindofredditguy,2020/01/07,"Bell's Let's Talk Sucks (Canada) It's that time of year again in Canada. The notorious 'Let's Talk' day is fast approaching. Supposedly Bell has raised over 100 million since it began but here's why I HATE it:

1. Campaign is effecively a viral advertisement for Bell.
2. I've never once actually seen use of that donation money or where it goes. I've never thought to myself ''Thank God for Bell's Let's Talk"" while I was sitting in the emergency room hallway for three days in crisis, multiple times, waiting for a psych floor spot to open. Have you ever been to the Bell Treatment Centre? How about The Bell Mental Health Wing of your local hospital? The Bell Mental Health Crisis House? Did you get a grant from Bell to attend therapy? Did Bell ever cover the cost of your meds? I'm sure the money does go somewhere, but if they're going to shamelessly stick their name all over the campaign, they should shamelessly stick their name all over their donations so I know excactly that the money is being put to good use. FFS they should use most of it for mental health inpatient beds, crisis house spots, hire some mental health professionals, etc... actual boots on the ground treatment access. Apparently there's a mental health entreprenurial grant program though that Bell started (F off Bell. We need better treatment not a business loan).
3. The whistleblower story a few years ago about how working at Bell is a toxic environment.
4. Overemphasis on stories of Anxiety and Depression. Yes they're the most common mental health diagnoses and they're serious, but if you really want to reduce stigma, have people share their stories of the most stigmatized diagnoses. We all know there's much more stigma for example surrounding Schizophrenia and Dissociative Identity Disorder than Anxiety and Depression.

End Rant.

F Bell.",5.438940208794683,8.079530110091746,5.515231466835392,75.6046788990826,70.52905198776759,9.036338711378257,27.483813139301912,9.581879112588783,2.9319449330380687,1474,53,237,37,29,463,184,327,0.179,0.745,0.076,-0.9917,2,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,2,5,6,2,13,10,2,0,20,1,17,8,0,5,8,41,36,15,0,6,7,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,2,0,9,7,0,1,3,0,7,5,3,5,0,2,7,1,17,5,34,23,11,41,0,2,1,0,19,17,1,7,18,135,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.1587875645815306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211905835378496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447746759709676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195463949839344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104938504660763,0.0,0.14014724711456675,0.16515354434780966,0.0,0.0,0.09324344609502473,0.0,0.07119703299527362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205913979757594,0.0,0.09073580209995544,0.0,0.14718614219251366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04250625613787644,0.0,0.0924753810928698,0.06823932521927413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032429301760438,0.0,0.5188792181903319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877526782274709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942458247084809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495825483322947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037052272811866,0.0,0.4919390539496992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598075742783753,0.06032600994384516,0.12549678470999956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664373515981022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056403471649131724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178737487980975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052120090515258746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730027184893148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05758569116677827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667905871867409,0.0,0.0,0.19617770844420435,0.0,0.07490361969192813,0.09304009270589267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993393299680787,0.06458925397461637,0.09488113997156247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108018633578365,0.0,0.0,0.047987122994646206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341304258529603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922967527298765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478391475115227
mentalhealth,XxPlanesxX,2020/01/07,"Need some opinions/tips I’ve been taking ssris for the last 3 months after finally deciding to try and do something about my depression and anxiety. For the most part i have noticed a noticeable difference in how I feel, not necessarily happier, but more in control of myself and not letting negative feelings tear me apart. I know it’s normal to have ups and downs, but today, I’m having a particularly bad “down” day. It’s surprising because I had a relatively good day yesterday; went to the gym, ate well, relaxed, etc. I guess I’m just wondering if this is a normal occurrence or if there is something I should be doing differently to avoid days like today.",11.063467741935485,8.09036357258065,11.306193548387101,58.174290322580674,58.435483870967744,15.081290322580646,44.96129032258065,13.348371206891418,6.03623741935484,529,25,89,16,5,181,91,124,0.10400000000000001,0.737,0.159,0.845,1,1,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,1,7,0,12,1,0,2,0,27,23,10,0,6,8,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,2,5,2,0,1,3,3,1,0,4,2,9,5,14,16,5,17,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,7,11,66,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003494534483156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13101244979968907,0.09565026191425706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598677082323666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035799469899441,0.0,0.13514548032159662,0.0,0.0,0.3278729894469923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17499499718520353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15867579652361855,0.0,0.0,0.1718861252764723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13160781354544202,0.0,0.0,0.17285293892291356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623307556445653,0.1279017665219708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16045006980733015,0.0,0.07665780512135638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12524325618291945,0.0,0.0,0.11634602544967115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074749840624841,0.0,0.35728384268181074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16991714192430066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24159240767853446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797603043221262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974627450060292,0.0,0.0,0.10653090219123236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14108002305283648,0.1454562026724842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17016110278422872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luciliddream,2020/01/07,"I'm being forced to face my phobia for one whole week Hi there, I'm reaching out to the community here in case anyone has any advice for a situation like mine. 

I have a fear of large waters, and in general standing at the base of large things like skyscrapers, or idk bridges, cruise ships...

I'm currently unmedicated. I have to go on a cruise ship next week for a 6 day work conference. I think it's too late to address a walk-in clinic for help and I don't have access to a family physician. I am in Canada so finances don't matter as hard.

I also have MS so getting medication on such short notice is very unlikely. I think the DR would have to know what reacts well or ill with my disease. I should have known about this trip at least 6 weeks ago but :( I didn't. I came to the assumption that getting on an  ssri would take too long and benzos are addictive. I have no idea what else is used to treat symptoms of phobias.

I'm gonna take some valerian root and melatonin with me. I'm so scared of the ship. The impending death feels have already started and I'm sweating at night thinking about it. The 5000 other people with me, and anyone with OR without a long term disease can simply get people'd out. I get it often as I work from home.

The most support I've gotten is ""just don't think about it"" and that's the fucking worst r/thanksimcured ass advice ever. I'm frustrated and scared. 

Any advice ?",2.60904929577465,4.513678595070424,3.922794366197184,87.1715014084507,76.42957746478874,6.515830985915493,24.036056338028175,7.404127859558343,1.0316807323943658,1107,36,225,14,25,363,163,284,0.179,0.763,0.057999999999999996,-0.9907,1,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,2,16,11,2,3,17,0,23,12,3,3,1,41,50,18,1,3,6,0,2,2,0,4,7,0,2,0,11,15,1,0,8,2,1,5,6,6,1,1,3,2,18,5,38,42,6,32,0,0,0,2,2,12,2,6,16,139,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12703861312602144,0.0,0.34162528585795515,0.1032998328778969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859751091216934,0.09319172238920044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584934238740363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16296573352244653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328317120046249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751544060706965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734870717351997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541113706617801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985732363136007,0.1311324795620364,0.05892279132943976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773325572134623,0.2435355788350929,0.0,0.0662286199394888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439104196127068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810988538277619,0.0,0.1168925074116111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155203047444206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404371212876153,0.0,0.13145475740155751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386467133356945,0.0,0.0,0.2062567938007363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11739514624780865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393459894246822,0.10935870700521558,0.0,0.0,0.1326740547011349,0.0,0.0,0.0789660515709678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078959054770739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333405369283797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098843049941727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248294430724754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224072773871373,0.0,0.12112282830568538,0.17523723656236856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741961660191678,0.29867960368971885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064744674651327,0.0,0.09615226401982528,0.0,0.0,0.28042820645698474,0.0,0.10477752677116688,0.0,0.0,0.1301053857509723,0.0,0.11233404453419164,0.0,0.16967541442644532,0.0,0.0,0.16556397572204176,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wrierocean,2020/01/07,"Opinions needed Hello,

I wanted to see if anyone could offer some insight into a decision I am making. I have previously been on an SSRI (for about a year) and have struggled with mental health pretty much my entire life after my fathers suicide when I was a child. 

I currently do not have health insurance and am finishing up a masters degree so I am about to begin an unpaid internship and have just moved back into my mothers house with her new husband in a new city  I have been living with my boyfriend for the last 5 years, and in recent months we have been fighting so much that I’ve have very strongly considered leaving the relationship. I’m now conflicted about that, but all of my things are now relocated so the option stands, but now the thought of ending it is so painful that I burst into tears constantly. 

I also do jot handle general change well, such as the move that I just completed to a much bigger city than I am used to. 

I guess what I need an opinion on is this, I am crying constantly. I am upset constantly and my internship starts tomorrow. I found an app where I could get the same SSRI I had before, but coming off of it last time was a nightmare so I’m hesitant to start it again. Can anyone offer some perspective? 

TL;DR: I’m trying to decide if I should go back on an SSRI in order to keep my disruptive depression from hurting my current plans.",7.350495735607673,6.633730414179107,7.902579957356077,72.50052238805971,63.88805970149254,10.791471215351812,33.69509594882729,10.125756701596842,3.3378498933901923,1093,39,196,21,14,364,152,268,0.135,0.841,0.024,-0.9838,2,0,0,0,2,1,21.0,1,0,0,3,21,8,1,2,18,0,28,4,0,2,1,45,47,18,1,8,8,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,10,13,0,2,5,0,0,4,1,6,1,0,8,1,29,2,33,36,7,47,0,2,1,0,11,13,0,8,28,154,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357073470235057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16362851792049202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17994285785952474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956463597993563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377826059557966,0.1007914706039204,0.1226799792431458,0.37933012986172016,0.0,0.18684169436506212,0.0,0.12852707860807544,0.0,0.0,0.10077825822030226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036337815714136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829251878332773,0.0,0.0,0.06113151053961696,0.0,0.06649797285835828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12889678642200056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487466809019168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13501077101067593,0.12525878708213833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040015079326232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907532123562133,0.0,0.12389388803789005,0.0,0.0,0.08264575090000963,0.0,0.0,0.10331963281963216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810331401829669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791588734541528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09339414963725373,0.24872058936627225,0.2580415936059957,0.1735189333416296,0.0,0.2260128535195234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450406894173448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903853880965228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155306412418368,0.12562210402205035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323970814116657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16563680767717234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232148616864393,0.0,0.12798704871830566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773448349373085,0.0,0.0,0.09289076523906996,0.06822792613595981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944030939045868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010567816168866,0.0,0.09654331690592363,0.06901396598180068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105203658746943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069779300756847
mentalhealth,astroannie_,2020/01/07,"I finally got diagnosed I've been seeing a therapist for about 2 months now and today I finally plucked up the courage to ask him about my diagnosis.

I've been ""diagnosed"" before or rather, my normal doctor and a psychiatrist have told me what they think which mental illness(es) they think I might have.

It feels weirdly.. freeing (?) to finally have been told a diagnosis. I've always felt like maybe my problems are not really problems, as if I'm taking the therapy slot away from someone with more serious problems. I know it's not a great mindset to have. But now it's easier to feel at peace about the whole situation.",5.0774358974358975,6.900054350427354,6.121025641025642,74.33230769230772,69.5982905982906,9.986324786324786,31.803418803418804,10.25414643259724,3.6212495726495733,497,22,87,14,9,165,76,117,0.107,0.768,0.125,0.4789,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,0,6,9,0,0,7,0,9,3,0,0,0,20,22,6,0,6,6,0,3,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,6,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,7,4,11,5,14,14,2,10,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,3,8,58,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174893067540341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320024848868257,0.0,0.13266159123605045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015038642376688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866290685982986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452368552871644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278943351443454,0.0,0.13557367630622907,0.4640314968306843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293015002155292,0.155672962462739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775995601082323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898295018868313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141853890135055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229589944875692,0.14979037058706382,0.0,0.0,0.11270410480782027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138345544046495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4053265959396951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904560241721858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125177313504968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871416955947618,0.0,0.0,0.11963788984849663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061644618950432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16147394971086526,0.1639435184946126,0.0,0.1809498941365592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13384062907394126,0.26984437285121504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764421465277986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,24e27z,2020/01/07,"Accomplishment today: I made a phone call Well two phone calls actually. I finally made a phone call to my fin aid office and this director lady I was suppose to get in contact with...MONTHS AGO. But hey, I finally did it even though I’ve been putting it off for months so I guess that’s the good news. Bad news is now I’m dealing w major anxiety about the other things I have to do like contacting this professor about an assignment that didn’t go through which could possibly mean I might fail my class. No big deal I guess just doing the best I can one step at a time. My anxiety is through the roof I’m gonna try to calm down maybe more practice w this stuff is all I need for me to not get anxious anymore.",1.7948979591836718,3.8207911768707485,3.1947959183673484,90.85913265306124,79.40816326530613,7.1931972789115655,24.105442176870746,8.192908349453996,1.3348176870748296,561,20,124,11,14,183,102,147,0.08900000000000001,0.8009999999999999,0.111,0.4836,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,8,7,0,0,8,0,13,0,0,2,1,15,25,4,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,11,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,2,1,2,6,0,14,5,15,16,4,15,0,1,0,0,11,5,0,3,8,76,25,6,0.0,0.0,0.13307036081884438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087733875565372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20863424123438384,0.15405107877895796,0.13523519341276585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385718957797175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431042796424641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4177248024488788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887454961335287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28116798850259705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006630176701705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987574262041278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424878039091319,0.0,0.0774980859572908,0.11437459416793007,0.0,0.0,0.3004378571066526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661994538441339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580594378570312,0.0,0.0,0.13699469778424025,0.14853899677524582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14465931480643351,0.0,0.0,0.21768687150547408,0.0,0.0,0.10111124169130814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240291973388744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372849716848794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13708221439587828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15610270944594246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059334329596114,0.0,0.13397569681967125,0.0,0.07951420858549825,0.0,0.12925593026585674,0.0,0.0,0.09258134738526426,0.0,0.13320657983656226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226064771321416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dystonet,2020/01/07,"Depression, Stress, Anxiety & Hallucinations, etc. This may be slightly long.

Over the past 6-7 months, my mental condition has been affecting me massively. It's gotten worse as the weeks and months have gone by, to the point where it's nearly got me fired from work and kicked out of college.

To start off, I didn't know I had depression & anxiety, until I was diagnosed with the symptoms from when my therapist told me. This happened suddenly, when I suffered a second brain hemorrhage four years ago and the changes it brought to my physical health and my personality in the future. About six-seven months ago, my current ex-girlfriend broke up with me and that was when I was at my lowest. I just didn't function in the way that I should have.

I'm always stressing myself out with college work because I'm always trying my best, but it's never enough. Also including work itself, where I talk to customers but I'm not fully focused, which nearly resulted in me getting fired. 

Just recently, I have been seeing figures and shadows in my vision, which is making me go crazy. I also hear people call my name when they never did. Much more recently, I have sleep paralysis and it's frightening.

What can I do to better this? Thanks.",5.796896551724139,7.097372310344831,6.137413793103452,76.88646551724139,67.27586206896552,9.248275862068963,30.87931034482759,9.516144504307137,2.9175896551724145,984,38,172,20,16,316,139,232,0.14400000000000002,0.7909999999999999,0.065,-0.9292,2,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,1,5,11,9,0,2,8,0,20,5,2,3,2,27,37,17,0,1,5,0,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,14,12,0,0,2,0,0,3,5,6,0,2,14,4,29,3,27,20,5,41,0,4,1,0,7,15,0,1,22,127,43,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115616691482665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19085990548276796,0.19858797371235404,0.25859287392420266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825776806943636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274382859068554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252318282942176,0.1055396727489508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321425030463532,0.12185156368771285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623769169518068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20556137450272347,0.12111971615246807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12330210799552058,0.13308699657173145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062346172447639375,0.0,0.06781926451103894,0.0,0.0954408970629249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055251096312606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268445955808538,0.1344961122537881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655818807201139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560528113639962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965519977395549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202588351221812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28574957697690195,0.0,0.08772293018560988,0.0,0.1840727669775152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139161300145607,0.08272995294329834,0.10419631295985687,0.0,0.0,0.1128075425578521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356523900119235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950923487972617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941842473009287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446397679331882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27338936558091737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403189344264988,0.0,0.09591473783193964,0.0,0.10986509786036057,0.0,0.13855393329232096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11402707340505215,0.0,0.08101876078036127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472038115414456,0.09572112845594087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606258855126629,0.0,0.12160975189297467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684605293893165
mentalhealth,difavix,2020/01/07,"My (23F) friend (23M) keeps saying he ""knows"" he won't live long even though he's physically healthy Hello. So my best friend (23M) has been experiencing what I believe is a high functional depression for a couple of years now, but even before that, as early as we were 16 years old, while he felt generally good, he would always casually make comments about how he ""feels"" or ""knows"" that he won't live to be old age and how he will definitely die young. He has no physical health problems, or any real physical health concern to back it up, and everytime I ask him why he thinks so, his only ""argument"" is ""I just know"". I have tried talking to him multiple times, trying to convince him to see a therapist, to get help, but he just he won't do it because he says he just doesn't care and refuses to do anything. He also often puts himself down, any given chance in the conversation he will use to make negative comments about himself, and when I try to bring him up or give him any compliment he will accuse my of lying and become defensive. Even though I'm always there for him, whenever we get into a disagreement, he will accuse me of not caring about him and there's nothing I can do to prove it to him that I do. He also gets defensive and cold every time I try to give him an advice or try to help when he's complaining (which is alot). About his comments concearning death, I have asked him multiple times is he suicidal and everytime he says no, that he won't kill himself, but something else will and he just ""knows"" he won't live long. He uses any given opportunity to say this. Yesterday, I was playing with Snapchat filters and took a picture with a filter on that makes you look old. I sent the picture to him playfully, and told him to try the filter (I also recommended him to try the baby filter and other filters as well before), to which he replied that he won't do it because he is scared of that, looking old or whenever, and again said how he won't live to be that age anyway. I get really upset when he keeps saying this. I want to help him, but he refuses to help himself or let anyone help him and is very defensive. What can I do? Im so confused with him. What is actually going on here? Is there anything I can do?",7.168688224527153,5.7625496689038025,7.8826367703884515,74.73687766931056,64.6152125279642,11.259263778726867,34.188427903193,10.33465798735191,3.2685534675615213,1750,62,351,35,22,589,193,447,0.132,0.73,0.138,-0.7678,0,0,1,0,0,0,62.0,2,1,0,2,35,23,4,3,12,0,42,2,0,8,1,66,79,42,4,3,15,0,2,0,2,13,2,6,0,0,20,20,0,7,8,3,0,5,12,10,1,0,10,13,45,13,44,53,2,36,0,1,3,0,85,8,0,9,23,224,65,0,0.0,0.0,0.07010764811470582,0.0,0.0,0.07020339067942286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723566038354626,0.11955697251709327,0.0,0.0,0.1954207059656835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050233754049130885,0.0,0.11824005943947168,0.0,0.13432556454556113,0.0,0.0,0.055242236374745415,0.0,0.08758870693954514,0.07934409302001877,0.12226488388136825,0.0809415857115746,0.07539398269566862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649587259138447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949205536576485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187760301536616,0.0,0.07456088699810083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06001496029202854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235333591386984,0.0,0.060530172988867974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03632558751528765,0.0,0.06897980224752916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101024945569954,0.0,0.1501383892796057,0.13783521687351713,0.04082959200248565,0.06025784969579796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15272985110133616,0.0,0.0,0.2407716448307051,0.07590525499470888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760193105515767,0.0,0.0,0.1277133408435487,0.07948277751555931,0.0,0.15793043182425456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346354239668346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537520031088873,0.1271562165468532,0.12065874994046613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14386572890882865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893455236527908,0.0,0.3015453193827987,0.0,0.0,0.054639249353817934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874330670316542,0.0,0.07222127895733435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177218017501008,0.0460239688816966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833840756226066,0.2856591037909289,0.07192660007962881,0.0,0.0572489517829891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05530765460408052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858373355081677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05774405902125403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341436032153185,0.0,0.04603359683946881,0.14116924235807587,0.0,0.12567533719744767,0.0,0.0,0.06864832460116045,0.07981935525693816,0.341433083909291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409723139351768,0.0,0.059277359450214916,0.04237440560048844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0645947880690398,0.0,0.06482643360849809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05103465529869671,0.0,0.0,0.09252807476221707
mentalhealth,deeplynugget,2020/01/07,"I feel like I’m lying to everyone I keep separate Reddit accounts. I have my main that is littered with personal information, and is generally me living my best life. I have my work one (I work in tech) for research. I have this one and some throwaways. Every time I post on my main one I feel like I am lying to my followers, to the friends I made. Because I am not okay. I am depressed and anxious and I am suffering. I feel guilty lying to them and pretending I’m okay. I feel guilty that I need to hide who I am so they don’t worry about me. Maybe this is stupid and I know the online pals I have gained would be so kind and understanding, but I don’t want them to know. I don’t want them to see me as a fucking wreck and I don’t want them to worry about a random person on the internet that they have never met. I just feel guilty.",0.7566666666666677,2.74977373446328,2.9116666666666653,91.7016242937853,82.84180790960453,6.193220338983053,20.567796610169488,7.3871296695380915,0.5388508474576272,649,19,147,10,18,220,85,177,0.196,0.6890000000000001,0.114,-0.9377,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,6,4,5,11,2,0,5,2,19,2,0,1,1,32,39,12,0,5,3,0,5,2,2,1,1,0,0,2,6,9,0,1,9,1,1,1,6,4,0,3,2,6,37,7,16,35,4,7,0,2,1,1,13,3,1,2,4,104,43,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17147824584058996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252910125880327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929308019050914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073555244998986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788869025239955,0.14504079350439966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3837451291303451,0.21687603317834325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727172339398825,0.14032638710978595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491694374674534,0.0,0.1580647757603747,0.16683841363475282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072129851454442,0.14831277343934468,0.0,0.1340323747814442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14362632211692386,0.0,0.0,0.15249234638084222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254954199228702,0.11706895295879073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085682498059888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650724158857664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453718026447228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095609677500405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885093250609968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801759234038815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685870681453554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22100824604617444,0.3082979808299704,0.0,0.10782647564601101,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRA_socialmedia,2020/01/07,"Anxiety/Depression Ruining my Relationship My (26F) mental health is ruining my relationship. Anxiety is something that I've always dealt with but managed fairly well with medication. I started dating this guy (24M) a few years ago and he was aware of my anxiety issues from the get-go and was always fairly supportive of me in that regard. We ended up getting pregnant and I stopped taking all my anxiety medications during pregnancy. This was a really hard time for me because not only was my anxiety not being managed, I was extremely hormonal and insecure. We fought a lot throughout the pregnancy but ended up working through most of our problems and staying together. I was sure that after the baby was born things would get better because I could get back on medication and so on. However, I developed very bad postpartum depression and have pretty much spiraled out of emotional control the past two months our son has been born. My PCP put me on some antidepressants and I know that they can take a while to get into your system and have an effect. In the mean time, I have been following the advice of some of my peers and have been very open about my feelings with him. Mostly of insecurity and isolation. Every time I bring it up I try to be as non-confrontational as possible and just open a safe line of communication. I am aware that my feelings are not always rational, but that is part of having a mental illness in  my opinion. So when I do communicate these feelings to my partner, he basically degrades/dismisses me I feel like. He tells me that it's not his fault that I feel that way, there's not always something wrong, if i know that these feelings are irrational then why do I bring them up, he just wants to come home and relax, I'm overreacting/being dramatic, etc... I feel like I get no where and I feel like things will never get better because he is not understanding at all. Every time he says these things I just get more down on myself and wanna close myself off from the world. I'm at a loss and don't know what to do. I love this man and I know it's my responsibility to work on my own mental health but I don't know how I can do that well without support from my partner/baby's father. Has anyone been through anything similar? Can someone give me some advice or insight? I'm really trying and am tired of getting nowhere.",5.086448484848481,6.620305648888893,6.221959595959599,74.74209090909093,69.17777777777778,9.365656565656566,30.74747474747475,9.725611199111238,3.0965111111111114,1882,77,333,44,33,629,218,450,0.131,0.7559999999999999,0.113,-0.7045,1,1,2,0,0,0,44.0,4,1,2,7,13,24,1,2,15,0,40,8,0,3,4,82,79,32,0,6,16,2,9,3,1,2,7,1,1,3,24,29,0,3,17,1,0,5,11,11,2,1,12,10,56,13,49,62,14,52,0,4,0,1,27,23,0,9,24,245,80,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214563021466786,0.06447248104874112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420752194520594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22255895608841994,0.0,0.0,0.05085586720425506,0.0,0.059852193757964176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055926376404049134,0.06072813624865951,0.13301015620950754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865099010782366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265213068598748,0.0,0.0,0.08157506109423576,0.05807054001103086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12528783569666416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181364892750191,0.12883783097104126,0.0,0.08111534474887783,0.0,0.0,0.1225596015126294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2942036548552121,0.15587914860680271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419949553241101,0.06977110926781871,0.04133524058049669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201606067427184,0.0,0.0,0.0651535369128991,0.0,0.0,0.1546213133531394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295607126241037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591325446375119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199857874958678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659946381547553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061834098912508,0.06564342021155407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922641045191882,0.0,0.2198093490806274,0.21989008215636996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580539447764769,0.0,0.053466348386277306,0.0,0.05609535994079405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531592177164829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876160900386607,0.0694308715097399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199434006718005,0.0,0.0739945359015452,0.0,0.06959464891790311,0.0,0.07311569365059632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318789303985237,0.0,0.0,0.1561737800049934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783936209055567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616255411662426,0.11198520959325313,0.0,0.0,0.051480045180511184,0.07752257631809699,0.0,0.06080716293019081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507069906073865,0.06854899762866315,0.0,0.10937074241596867,0.0,0.06357092591812345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495961779728792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16964232862528694,0.08359467173637747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876043311690112,0.0,0.07104854212120627,0.07571652001049294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002294383456218,0.04289918571425117,0.0577312327273266,0.0,0.0,0.1307895070280109,0.0,0.06562926783641956,0.0,0.0,0.07011099975272837,0.0,0.10589944471620727,0.0,0.0,0.051666687107378484,0.07952096445302223,0.0,0.046836988115306
mentalhealth,Crystal141414,2020/01/07,"I wish my emotions were gone sometimes Sometimes I'd rather not feel anything. No sadness or Happiness or anger or irritability. I just wish I could turn my emotions off. 

Today I feel as if I was kicked around. My everything hurts. 

I take meds but I still dont even know what I have. I take abilify.",0.6877777777777787,3.205286101694917,2.1666666666666683,91.20483992467042,94.76271186440678,5.334086629001884,23.504708097928443,6.937597516519254,1.0709193973634648,236,10,48,4,9,76,41,59,0.145,0.721,0.134,-0.1546,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,15,14,6,0,5,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,2,12,1,3,10,0,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,4,2,32,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533236969016476,0.16586236833969106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875962461077796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21836310645916904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4191649569706527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306116800045325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16745044970732956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18841578383405194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983387921685124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19945708808584384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239540548000134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20695710424372368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685461914892447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14879365788972335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801756378037987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17660751510201897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20266029404281585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.428512613614061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,d0---0b,2020/01/07,"I got to episode 40 in my Schizoaffective Podcast last night in two weeks of mania! I’m so happy. I realized within those episodes that it shows what it’s like for a person to have to commit someone, as well as what it’s like to be committed the first time and other things as well. I hope it helps. I’m turning the diary I wrote from 10 days before being psychosis, diagnosis, going through psychosis, and into remission (luckily) enough to invent and being patenting my first biomedical device as well as other scientific things I’ve created from generators to artificial lungs. I also started putting the first young adults fantasy novel up for my family to listen to while they go about their day and I’m having a blast. I put them up on youtube as well so people can listen through there as well. I’m just happy to be in a better place than I was three weeks ago when I literally was at my 4th suicide attempt. This condition is a strange way to live, and often extremely hard, but if you have projects to work on you can keep yourself busy and feel better each time you go a step further along in the process. Anyway I‘m off to record episodes 41+42 for the day, and perhaps 43 if it doesn’t take too long before my chores are due. Much pleasure, -J.",5.422987804878048,6.2005552317073205,5.947713414634148,79.80498475609757,67.8211382113821,8.751626016260163,30.822154471544714,8.841846274778883,2.4321227642276426,1001,38,190,16,16,324,153,246,0.022000000000000002,0.8220000000000001,0.155,0.9769,0,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,3,3,7,15,13,0,0,10,0,14,1,1,0,2,22,32,22,1,3,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,1,2,14,10,0,1,2,3,0,6,1,0,5,5,4,4,19,13,42,24,3,40,0,0,0,0,12,14,0,4,21,132,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291252602886318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284231434710563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19757910976992932,0.0,0.0,0.20535580689226374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22461787852289614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995869998179852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944543047845214,0.0,0.05870186937816176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962548236830176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979409177196267,0.0,0.09285296190703447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24717372682010305,0.10399964379146764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781702437087361,0.0,0.0,0.11531000176537948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319188710838503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463412765022816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343775324627113,0.0,0.1025153201904575,0.10274173282418718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853442721680162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089486833387237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048668239308585,0.10137096963512693,0.1212961133381165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334180600323679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836817206583293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217368718292647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699070758888414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729010573650972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425868729346542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13539358402423146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12627963397715303,0.11340939299099904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215198320408616,0.18625118932731566,0.0,0.5219233976798062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451962126724791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Farcry_Wanderer44,2020/01/07,"Directionless How do people just know what they want to study or do with their lives? I honestly didn’t think I would make it this far, but I’m here and I don’t know what I want to pursue. I feel empty b/c I have no passion in life. I’ve lost interest in the hobbies that have gave me meaning in the past. Nothing seems worth while when I know I’ll eventually die and have nothing to show for my life.",0.5995219638242908,2.6395162906976783,2.406434108527133,94.82913436692509,83.76744186046511,5.682687338501292,20.020671834625325,6.937597516519254,0.16629354005167984,315,9,74,4,9,104,60,86,0.168,0.693,0.139,-0.5717,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,2,1,4,4,0,0,2,0,8,3,0,2,0,18,21,7,1,3,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,7,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,11,3,8,17,0,7,0,1,0,1,3,4,0,2,3,44,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455761094381242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196431106739068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3901235208978056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3342660029719702,0.0,0.0,0.2089414175263184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258300687291012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15794691385493626,0.0,0.0,0.25775054898376937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4540900693993909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258823181054971,0.1640437885767567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21541163386301707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516177190269722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.279131380703292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680893642680098,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jcmuzzle,2020/01/07,"My close friend [23F] is depressed, imminently suicidal and refusing any help. Please help me help her. I am posting this as I am imminently concerned about the possible suicide of my close friend and am currently at a loss as to how to help. Any advice or help on how I can overturn this situation would be greatly appreciated as I am worrying every minute of everyday that she will be gone. Bit of context...

Every day she is calling me saying she wants this life to end and how it is only constant pain and suffering for her. Luckily in the last few days I have been off work with flu so have been able to be on the phone to her for most of the day. However, anytime I try to suggest advice or support services such as advice helplines, support groups in her area and even offer to pay for private therapy she simply tells me that it is not worth the time/effort/money as she doesn't want any of those things to force ""fake happiness"" but simply not be here so her pain can end. 

She has had a history of depression for the most part of the \~5 years (caused in part by family deaths and the suicide of her ex-boyfriend, which was very hard to deal with for her) that I have known her but it has not been this bad until the last couple of weeks following Christmas/new years. In the past she has received counselling and benefited from it but since moving back to her mums house recently she has gotten worse and is basically refusing all help and explicitly telling me it won't be long left until she is gone because she can't deal with the pain of ""being forced to live this life."" 

I spend every second of every day in a constant state of worry that she is going to do it and I really am pleading with anyone out there if you have any advice on how to help someone suicidal who is unwilling and unreceptive to any help. If anyone wants anymore information/context on her life/the situation I am happy to provide this if it will help with helping her.

Thank you. 

All the best to you all.",7.35323076923077,6.4425282461538425,7.597051282051282,75.3271153846154,63.97435897435898,10.876923076923077,34.371794871794876,10.125756701596842,3.237041025641025,1576,58,306,30,20,515,186,390,0.16399999999999998,0.7120000000000001,0.125,-0.9667,2,0,0,0,0,2,36.0,0,3,0,3,12,19,0,0,15,0,42,6,0,5,4,48,53,32,5,7,11,1,1,0,2,4,6,1,0,0,21,19,0,2,1,0,3,6,6,9,0,1,8,2,41,10,60,35,10,45,0,4,0,0,52,16,0,7,21,222,62,3,0.0688115392718899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689673591266535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339710317655569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06824255674553592,0.09622925641377043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05291182621725109,0.057454761032112514,0.04194687565452771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221346513124469,0.0,0.07512437885248423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026427518791234,0.0,0.0,0.0706884058430918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487216564114623,0.0,0.0,0.07613865938795163,0.0,0.17751100077503235,0.14188335096953694,0.1185345558886851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189319889592815,0.0,0.0,0.04544937271200016,0.0,0.2319067586156817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486939515537246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632724909411738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039107183530759836,0.0,0.0,0.07586496497333238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14650232620060058,0.06164162322386716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4612292428895238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939927750564885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218117732078804,0.0,0.0,0.07476393875875496,0.0,0.14581087556015151,0.0,0.0,0.06076184986291967,0.06089604688276209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07313577631113446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645861342063289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05233427638298771,0.21966098807862192,0.0,0.0,0.14903238279181324,0.06568840042298299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553440640311168,0.0,0.07757467140529256,0.06590243335614991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04408243407773742,0.0,0.06794309354503875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05472169792195883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05692161636453369,0.1546941064641617,0.0,0.0,0.05830379392318723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010746215947521,0.15617303862421508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202886366299948,0.06335242023968966,0.07869199214251844,0.0,0.045715329084291816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04012456191717932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046718518257546034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05677672642668701,0.12176048612420184,0.0,0.055196466155845864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050095620131413165,0.13976291664441476,0.07012483725232123,0.04888174319923879,0.0,0.0,0.0886247504323237
mentalhealth,salmon-jacket,2020/01/07,"BPD with no anger but dissociation? Hi everyone I wanted to know if anyone can relate to this. 
I was diagnosed with BPD 3 years ago and I’m much better now. But I have this weird thing that instead of getting angry I just dissociate really hard. Even In situations where my  “normal“ friends get angry I just go Into sometimes black out disso 
Anyone had similar experiences?",3.2925000000000004,6.248141057971019,5.388242753623189,71.79366847826088,80.44927536231884,8.08768115942029,24.56702898550725,8.841846274778883,2.603476811594203,299,11,48,8,8,103,56,69,0.221,0.679,0.10099999999999999,-0.8206,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,13,10,4,0,3,5,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,2,6,2,8,8,1,8,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,1,3,34,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19038972300645296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003586743606521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18995566769500574,0.0,0.0,0.5410163852200669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179974217610067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418603223909572,0.0,0.0,0.2052317228184645,0.0,0.21009628709357064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16593868006733262,0.0,0.2244276205724173,0.0,0.12206455958436427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19240090723916348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803760250912193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15788818878761932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21043903231271024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375937210326954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24142198786819374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124231485452468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14269044730718652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668294988002698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831143223708395
mentalhealth,interstewwa,2020/01/07,"Any good app recommendations to help self harm ... pls And also how do you hide large scars I have a fresh on form tonight (it was a hard day and I was craving it for weeks not proud) 
I have school tomorrow and I’m in desperate need of help to hide them 
I also tried to find an app to help or regulate the urges but I could find any good one. Any help appreciated I hope you guys are going fine!",-0.29269441401971363,1.9555131807228958,1.711763417305587,96.22937568455644,91.89156626506023,5.427820372398687,15.97918948521358,6.980632752743323,-0.2693036144578307,306,7,74,5,11,101,57,83,0.08199999999999999,0.619,0.299,0.9670000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,1,1,3,6,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,1,0,12,11,8,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,2,1,9,5,8,8,1,7,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,2,4,41,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999338692308472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3825786077194556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972670809635286,0.0,0.0,0.1209407403609834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34279635684096194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657709570658218,0.3145809839937138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18568326887915435,0.0,0.0,0.16798921795715224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5027871477724505,0.0,0.0,0.18625868621285765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13905043395116418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12707455543448398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897894369793298,0.0,0.0,0.19563372521889089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273199331188821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15042451347920965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwawayoftheday09,2020/01/07,"Total lack of motivation to study... Two weeks of holiday feel like they were not nearly enough. Thing is, studying is the only thing I have to keep myself busy right now without feeling totally useless. I wish I had the courage to get out of here and do whatever I feel like doing but all the things are keeping me back. I wish that whenever I'd actually do that, I wouldn't get floored again as soon as some setbacks hit. I wish I could find something to do that actually feels like I'm doing something purposeful. Maybe I just need to accept that studying in college isn't for me, that I can find friends outside of those places too, that just doing things for the world is always better than getting a piece of paper that proves your worth. But I can't help feeling that I'll lose the opportunity to study while I'm still young, that I'll get the discount. I live in a country with a culture that values achievement, where you're basically looked down on when you choose not to study. I'm a smart guy, really, so it feels really bad when people won't recognise that when you can't show them a diploma. I may have problems but if I see the sense and the purpose in what I do, I'll do the absolute best I can to get it done. It's only when I don't see it, that I just don't want to do it anymore. I need to work towards a goal that I want to achieve. But this is just not it. This is only causing me conflict and along with that pain. I want to leave now...",4.895533333333333,4.8849900200000045,5.5420000000000025,85.01433333333334,68.8,8.4,30.0,7.984000788550335,1.7872,1146,40,247,13,18,372,151,300,0.10300000000000001,0.723,0.174,0.9755,0,0,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,3,2,9,18,15,0,0,15,0,31,1,0,2,4,53,59,16,0,13,13,0,6,3,1,3,1,0,0,1,28,7,0,3,12,2,2,0,11,5,0,1,3,9,30,10,34,51,8,26,0,2,3,0,9,13,0,3,16,177,58,7,0.0,0.0,0.2026829741819691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864105537184375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299014388443607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985334745916359,0.08670944331126977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898295021379174,0.09184585945480338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668136476609476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291484817718989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627341847519477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10730361186902727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150545617131404,0.2225688953171012,0.0,0.0,0.18983191605916644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802333558799126,0.0,0.27128366248547736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282667831214032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960768815568875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18461124043509514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996092656569607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522058922880868,0.0,0.09170042798075496,0.0,0.08720687027968622,0.11618028802701773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043301176280336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15400519742427954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369451664100055,0.1105024872400928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199570960208622,0.0,0.10849993430096903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936931442133376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133056451720336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868634161250205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550815964032375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15989582066486005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293381746515438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27597021827137497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014452264792349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837582087102964,0.0,0.08330127507531926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35826312138912,0.10010657553630824,0.0,0.07560319207488947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Undercovercopp,2020/01/07,"What can I do while I'm off work? I suffer with depression and anxiety and lately I've been having a really hard time. I was advised to take this week off work, which I'm doing and I would love some advice on things I can do during the days (and nights because that's when I often get the most depressed) to enjoy my time and feel refreshed after the week. My husband is at work so I'm by myself pretty much all day and just need suggestions on things to do that will keep my mind occupied and hopefully lift my mood. Thanks so much in advance. :)",4.653035714285714,4.924418946428574,5.505357142857147,84.08964285714286,69.35714285714286,8.542857142857143,25.82142857142857,8.418075326091056,1.5121642857142854,430,11,89,6,7,141,75,112,0.08800000000000001,0.752,0.161,0.8711,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,4,5,8,0,0,4,0,12,1,0,0,1,19,23,11,0,3,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,2,11,4,12,19,5,18,0,3,0,1,4,6,0,4,11,64,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787291670661473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13924877816800338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096087114254097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23478238815214114,0.0,0.31355607245287204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203740930307333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510065308933932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630588239251211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807920930226205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16179235944544262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20533235168983616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16428484784222674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18379356032712424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26761892908721435,0.1349693778093407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17081831750331636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851850655033647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661000279579585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368602955048052,0.0,0.0,0.16758434636896574,0.0,0.0,0.2418589065626119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122807134057655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29201926832809755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3975495359407599,0.0,0.0,0.12930547802951933,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,malimalia,2020/01/07,"every night I have dreams about packing, moving, failing at everything yet still don't want to wake up I relive all the terrible episodes of my life pratically every night. I'm a quitter. I run away. I don't know who I am. I can't breathe around people even in dreams. I'm hurt, physically and mentally. Nearly every night I dream of having to pack my shit and carry really heavy luggage around to the next place. I'm always all alone, on the road, meet people that hurt me or offer their friendship and then they're gone. All the failure and dull pain haunts me no matter asleep or awake. I hate going to sleep so much because that means I have to face another day of despair but I still don't wake up from the dreams. Sometimes when I nearly wake up I know I'm still dreaming and I close my eyes so hard and hide myself under the pillow so I can continue living in the dreaded past. Just let me die in the past.",2.3674467408585045,4.395892275675674,3.515739268680445,89.23914149443561,77.5945945945946,6.082670906200319,21.69316375198728,7.048011613610866,0.5851240063593006,721,20,147,8,17,233,111,185,0.22,0.7190000000000001,0.062,-0.978,0,1,0,0,0,3,17.0,0,0,1,1,13,10,2,1,9,0,10,11,9,0,3,21,21,14,1,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,9,0,0,3,5,0,4,5,10,0,0,1,2,22,0,24,19,4,35,0,5,1,0,4,17,1,2,14,93,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732207762056484,0.0,0.0,0.11032455730521892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13903098578103576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360644009702869,0.0,0.0,0.12457160339845688,0.0,0.0,0.08082494157051619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550884924022467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13760630897832174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757369497834143,0.0,0.3351355122839241,0.0,0.11916232264756148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535330759538797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877358009721195,0.13090405441117564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28387824489417385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14573474561294916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135581097820598,0.09365143659770182,0.0,0.0,0.11707839709765995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444281439425981,0.0,0.0,0.13361839087107408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092098052179328,0.09746807178023968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100976231054674,0.3732770044760285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410839007653252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531421491209533,0.18384084924641514,0.0,0.13852714401534558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849398221684879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610056475768645,0.0,0.0,0.13268461927626296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131133777954999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176569170227197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820434794427891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RobMarenghi,2020/01/07,"Hi guys, my depression advice video here. Apologies if you've seen it before but people have said they've found it very helpful and there may be new members on here who find value in it regarding health, which is often, perhaps unwisely, conceptually split in 2. Much love, Rob xx A Short Depression Advice Video :)

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RqbqFfFykZA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RqbqFfFykZA)",11.899137931034481,16.01528374137931,6.634000000000004,68.16100000000002,56.41379310344828,8.777931034482759,28.84137931034483,9.3871,2.93452,339,10,42,6,5,87,50,58,0.156,0.623,0.221,0.7269,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,7,8,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,5,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,1,1,3,3,1,5,0,2,1,1,7,4,0,3,1,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4816872975989231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20972434856100372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4245614790099727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22526538976235,0.0,0.0,0.2702371646545856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24404001443816836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619817523331244,0.0,0.0,0.16520091382273314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22244511941100265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18118081314054296,0.0,0.0,0.2380383255775061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17086843900027934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344455341993017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033601996003246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Saitooh,2020/01/07,"I’m on a downward spiral and I can’t find a way out Last summer I had my first anxiety attack during finals and ever since then I feel that my mental health is getting worse. 

I feel hopeless. I feel like I’ve fallen off the deep end and I can’t swim back up. Lately I’ve been thinking more more on where I went wrong with life. I’m currently 23, going on 24, and a first year student in a foreign university. Most of my classmates are 19 and I always feel out of place, being a foreigner notwithstanding. Most of my friends back home already finished school and are going out in the world, while I feel left behind.

Whenever a bigger task (papers, exams, larger scale club activities) I feel a sense of existential dread and I seize up mentally. I feel anxious, sad, depressed, worthless, undeserving. And the worst part is that I beat myself up about it afterwards.  Even if I do get something done, I’m always unhappy about it, because I know I can do better. Am I too hard on myself? Maybe I’m overreacting to the situation 

“It’s going to get better “ is starting to sound more and more like a pipe dream",3.4811879160266272,5.3185477511520745,4.935629800307221,81.14884152585769,73.79262672811059,7.402867383512545,25.880440348182287,8.167268648758528,1.7108271377368145,870,30,164,14,18,291,128,217,0.191,0.735,0.075,-0.9738,1,0,1,0,0,1,26.0,0,0,0,5,8,13,1,1,12,0,15,2,0,0,1,27,36,12,0,1,1,0,8,2,1,0,2,1,1,0,5,13,0,0,10,3,0,6,2,8,0,2,4,9,23,5,24,31,8,44,0,4,0,0,1,20,0,3,19,107,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737739034281954,0.0,0.2071706715468356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523421789302937,0.14063783505805166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162491366776692,0.0,0.1914496656540677,0.0,0.07588771635209401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202019031616033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722272654210208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739610224477854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110260852074511,0.0,0.0,0.08222421934723001,0.1126079876702374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4406198434942537,0.08893540878221594,0.0,0.1363722927547693,0.11378125656718442,0.2117816128765249,0.0,0.0,0.09618037093165327,0.0,0.19512206363101764,0.0,0.2122509582516128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151824648924856,0.0,0.0,0.13232664374044864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12487323825267133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841623899023272,0.10147565500083937,0.14042971276721244,0.0,0.13525833543879956,0.0,0.08793069958846768,0.12163867938884312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12506655496033608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250912511628619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348101260953038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13006515572832827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599014074531262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297909938634928,0.1399315478151207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583819082044426,0.0,0.0,0.0881143931662949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976792126938098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881406515230287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154031241436347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268655573413725,0.0,0.13610985581320315,0.0,0.08016723316862043
mentalhealth,harlequinnx,2020/01/07,"How do I get good mental health treatment with no insurance and a complex set of conditions? I have seen a ton of therapists and psychiatrists over the years and each one has diagnosed me with something different and tried a different treatment plan. How do I know which diagnosis and therapeutic plan to trust? 

Diagnoses given by various therapists: Bipolar 2, ADHD, BPD, PMDD, Hoarding disorder, excorication disorder, mood disorder nos, Major Depressive Disorder, narcolepsy, hypersomnolence, PTSD, GAD. I may even be forgetting something.

I have also had quite a few episodes of delusion/depersonalization/derealization.

Are they all correct? How the hell would that cornucopia of mental disorders even be treatable? Pretty positive I don't have narcolepsy, and I have great relationships with my friends, husband, and family so BPD seems suspect as well.

Medications tried: Depakote, Lexapro, Lamictal, Zoloft, Pristiq, Effexor, Concerta, Vyvanse, Klonopin, Wellbutrin, Prozac, Latuda, Rexulti, Abilify, Xanax. I am forgetting some medications.

Specialized treatments/therapies tried: ART, EMDR, DBT, CBT, neurofeedback

I'm getting back into services and I'm so tired of all the side effects and not much working.",9.564166666666663,12.707726515957447,9.06927659574468,52.36366666666669,60.43617021276596,13.523971631205676,46.575886524822685,12.45797560212912,7.7178605673758875,987,64,117,40,15,315,133,188,0.134,0.7559999999999999,0.109,-0.6206,2,0,2,0,0,0,50.0,0,0,1,5,10,9,1,0,7,0,15,10,0,4,3,31,23,16,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,10,0,0,0,2,14,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,2,1,1,3,1,11,6,13,16,9,6,1,1,1,0,4,3,1,3,2,78,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654517961401976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420507316429936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096602831886157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652329369141359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069118281271793,0.21374619325018093,0.0,0.22002355650022976,0.6033909755629264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390938646859457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926357982074156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135133179748537,0.0,0.11002549748074753,0.0,0.0,0.08831718418869255,0.0,0.11608907387206395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192459122689967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05786785915377219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121490326715092,0.21222695221403548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740458359530022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135120995252406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712375938613053,0.0,0.0,0.12308524307250986,0.0,0.0,0.11199512414691497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130483638274163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585740992838816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621238176726308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041500964488525,0.2445132530181349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121022118619211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144669618881418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467363711653938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665665103973524,0.0,0.0,0.07479916848635476,0.0,0.0,0.06780709121428953
mentalhealth,parallel-universe2,2020/01/07,"How to cope with anxiety when your worries are real? I've been struggling with anxiety and depression for a year, and over the last month things started to improve. I was feeling overall better and more calm.
One of the main issues that gives me anxiety is financial problems, I've always found a way to solve things but it's been really hard for me. Today for the first time in months I woke up with a headache and nausea, and I've been trying to calm myself down but I can't, I feel overwhelmed and like I can't solve issues now, so it only makes it worse.  I don't want to get to the point where I get so anxious or depressed that I can't even work, because of course it would only make things worse for me.

What do you do when your anxiety is somewhat justified, how do you calm yourself and get things into perspective when solutions seem so far away?",5.822280701754388,5.816424239766088,5.984263157894738,82.61534210526318,66.83625730994152,9.179181286549706,30.55029239766082,8.841846274778883,2.2595001169590647,679,23,136,10,10,216,98,171,0.19,0.6729999999999999,0.13699999999999998,-0.8355,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,4,0,3,11,10,0,2,7,0,15,0,0,4,0,27,28,18,0,3,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,11,11,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,5,0,2,6,3,16,5,21,21,3,22,0,3,0,0,5,9,0,3,13,96,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10871879327129233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3998152506881176,0.14760753152592626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275847488680185,0.0,0.0,0.07964854179708139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155573084212322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22507288997766747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629906770451297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213027919281445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113851790444444,0.0,0.1432609000939288,0.0,0.0,0.20479187657383036,0.12534006284437468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117044841294543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727481957806933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650456143944227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383341010350957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17443185577293446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20858160814719007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885379511511116,0.1987441846320432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351503134378047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502306127194646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14871859941951515,0.08370353067711178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894708840058685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248114536044336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659320415201254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472162579474043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07618834053985324,0.0,0.12384949818499046,0.0,0.0,0.08870891564798143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770660906759702,0.10371106915257104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512134173589856,0.132690603702127,0.26630546107441305,0.0928164375908298,0.0,0.0,0.08414014189281957
mentalhealth,rollinhardbro,2020/01/07,"someone please help me so as of lately i’ve been feeling out of line like completely doing shit that doesn’t make sense blah blah blah.

i was recently watching a snl clip where pete davidson talks about his borderline personality disorder and was interested and started looking things up. a lot of the symptoms described a lot of what i feel on a regular basis with relationship ect... 

the last thing i want is to go to a doctor and be like “look at me i have bpd treat me” and shit like that but i’m genuinely confused as what type of doctor i need to go to and the process behind that

can some body please explain what i need to do and if i should seek help

TLDR; think i have a pbd where do i go from here",4.886666666666667,5.2160782222222215,5.727777777777778,82.495,68.8611111111111,8.9,29.88888888888889,8.841846274778883,2.1540888888888894,560,20,117,9,9,184,91,144,0.09300000000000001,0.757,0.15,0.7246,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,8,2,1,9,0,13,6,3,1,0,23,28,11,0,5,2,0,2,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,8,8,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,3,5,13,5,20,23,3,13,0,0,3,0,7,6,2,5,7,78,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656113006745121,0.18778034901040486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15632361701818406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17087616538004144,0.30521077626312343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15077415748733042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542029361040111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19987091402670654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12153259357120018,0.16818602655894996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185213416643556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25040505343639724,0.0,0.0,0.2535110360096597,0.0,0.0,0.09952229062778656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221104596271084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301842914230599,0.0,0.3273238000624951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472136515409718,0.16007258722501494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.306088427709005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263279894141861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553044207858207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15496713562132194,0.0,0.11983717875401464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981046247602664,0.0955342673626594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794028865673899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,letsmovetocalifornia,2020/01/07,"i feel trapped outside of my body it doesn’t feel like i exist in my in body it’s like i’m watching from the outside and i don’t feel comfortable in my own skin. i feel like i can’t gain access to myself, like i’m trapped outside

i was in a traumatizing ordeal in june of 2018 and since then my life hasn’t been the same. i don’t know if this needs a trigger warning but what happened was my grandfather opened the shower while i was inside and dragged me out by my hair. 

that whole summer i didn’t feel mentally present. i told one of my so called close friends about what happened and she laughed. i cut off all my friends around this time and struggled with letting anyone in or trusting anyone when i started high school that september. i was miserable, no friends and feeling extremely stressed out.

it eventually got to the point where i just felt hopeless and began contemplating suicide so i decided to just stay home.this lasted for about a month (which would’ve been the month january 2018) until acs showed up because of all my absences and that’s when i started online school. i also started therapy but i was not at all good at expressing my feelings or thoughts. 

now i’m back in public school, i have friends and i’ve  been more consistent with self care to try to remind myself that i am someone who deserves better but i still feel trapped. like that wound was never healed. i still feel so uncomfortable in my body. like i’m not actually living in it. i really just wanted to get this off of my chest",3.673545150501672,5.5987181204013385,4.1499852842809375,86.61131906354517,73.48160535117056,7.058247491638798,29.01685618729097,7.839951260653429,1.834277217391304,1214,51,238,17,25,382,156,299,0.147,0.69,0.163,0.6167,2,3,1,0,0,2,19.0,0,0,0,2,17,21,1,3,8,0,18,9,6,1,4,48,46,24,1,3,11,0,12,6,4,0,3,0,1,1,16,16,0,0,13,1,0,0,10,5,0,1,15,13,39,16,36,30,7,44,0,2,1,0,11,22,0,3,27,160,55,3,0.0,0.0,0.09435137887440873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731958717437445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352098975797542,0.0,0.0,0.0860708470503341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434540045524557,0.0,0.05893875701015772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551071957021603,0.0,0.3221883319945141,0.0,0.0,0.0987269964014164,0.0,0.09857760137518788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4399851409070906,0.138144687962255,0.09283351576549637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29879678999359577,0.0,0.05051433200032752,0.0,0.0,0.08109544906574652,0.0773284545205183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17099784038101887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215384006102647,0.09698372543322213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05313597877534415,0.07881181909324951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886776562216094,0.06829202914385586,0.2834147439991194,0.0,0.08537531934566746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743653034091783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543473419851818,0.0,0.0,0.07169128432939176,0.07457003772870094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551679002946666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139931824514397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06193938952503648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935535280813065,0.0,0.0,0.10086435993440623,0.0,0.0,0.07997948031136723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192155170532049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20530408836511735,0.10305418214568927,0.15442678527364828,0.0,0.11075323982327537,0.1010769750093446,0.0,0.10575855583527173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056862117053792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675771322565236,0.05637825864440501,0.0,0.0,0.0923874107563858,0.0,0.06564330125881278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05702778091839756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079462258827581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868280747250095,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JiggleMcWiggle_1947,2020/01/07,"Feeling inadequate academically because of background in small town. I’m from a small town and a semi private catholic school in rural Victoria. I will be completing year 11 in 2020. 

In my school I am used to being recognised for my academic achievement and receiving the academic award each year etc. I’m at a VCE summer school (VCESS) right now and meeting lots of people and taking classes and I get the sense that everyone is better than me.

I feel like compared to people across the state I won’t do well. 

I feel like a big fish in a little pond in my school but a small fish in a big pond in Victoria.

How do I overcome this feeling of inadequacy?",4.9105949256342925,6.17744009448819,5.8944356955380615,77.93584426946633,69.31496062992126,8.794050743657044,31.43394575678041,9.150863307647796,2.757212423447069,520,22,97,10,9,172,77,127,0.045,0.85,0.105,0.4656,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,10,0,8,0,0,2,0,14,17,7,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,4,11,5,18,13,3,25,0,0,0,0,2,19,0,1,6,61,13,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115637408646733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676173669147807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17398646412906962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850685930624536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15856417673929613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33561995357628704,0.23709722502562786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669756411171832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16214123111245987,0.16631693777171494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410774955644969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300858294159042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171310054831002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6717664687290509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247673266000596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433201425225054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14920130172621082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21372171986983898
mentalhealth,darthbojack7,2020/01/07,"I don’t know how to love myself anymore I just don’t like myself anymore. I haven’t done anything shitty or anything but everyday I think that I’m a piece of shit and put myself down. I always think of the worst in situations about myself and never give myself credit for anything. When I get things done I just tell myself I got lucky and it won’t happen again. These aren’t thoughts I want, there is nothing more I want than for these thoughts to go away. I have anxieties that one day my loved ones will go away like my parents will one day be gone and I haven’t done anything to bring them joy and that I’m a nuisance. I find myself trying to make others happy but never myself. In fact I don’t know what even makes me happy anymore, I’ve been thinking what will make me happy and nothing. I feel like every time I get a little happy a few days later I always end up more sad than where I was before. I find myself wishing and praying  for eventual sustainable happiness because of it. In high school I spent the end of sophomore year and the first half of senior year living in a hotel and didn’t tell anyone and now regret that, I could’ve gotten help but instead I pulled a facade and acted like everything was okay so no one suspected anything. My love life is not what I want it to be, but I know I can’t control it. This last semester at school I met a girl and it was nice to feel genuinely liked and attracted to by someone else , but two days after I met she told me she couldn’t do it anymore but it wasn’t my fault she said. That was my most recent crash and if I’m being honest I haven’t recovered since that. I want to feel good about myself but I don’t know how or where to start. I’ve spent most of the past years just hating myself thinking I don’t deserve to be liked. My life isn’t necessarily bad right now but every time I think of how normal things are I get a weird feeling in my chest like things aren’t right and it’s preventing me from feeling happiness. I cannot tell my parents because they believe any type of mental health issues to be a myth and will not support any help. My school has a counseling center and I’ve been thinking about going to that at the start of the semester. I just need to talk to someone about it and I don’t know where to go or what to do.",3.1325081357508147,4.346281541841005,4.227245467224549,88.40449907019993,73.53974895397491,6.733705253370527,23.738028823802885,7.054809383877858,0.7698143189214317,1819,50,383,17,36,593,194,478,0.105,0.677,0.218,0.9959,4,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,2,22,33,2,0,16,1,43,8,2,7,3,80,99,35,0,10,18,2,5,7,0,5,3,1,0,1,27,18,0,2,21,1,3,9,23,8,0,7,22,6,65,25,48,66,7,55,1,2,0,3,22,19,1,7,34,266,92,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230464299061176,0.0,0.0,0.083610537871115,0.0,0.04702838770223273,0.0,0.2438676631093226,0.042984914772241985,0.0,0.2529444082906667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551601677575313,0.0,0.05132925470411248,0.07494946722725311,0.0,0.05231089844627695,0.06926153995855602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894970514597326,0.0490829741065428,0.0,0.0,0.15858576744355365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18873153223719347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05135467181467731,0.0,0.10889762554805793,0.0,0.0,0.040603813960213064,0.0,0.10359107641172084,0.0,0.05524997867276362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541863364114558,0.04391792128082085,0.0,0.0,0.1123745049935549,0.052290804812134516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963548214152014,0.0589726485912925,0.13975117453461544,0.05156251175253857,0.04916736254567485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054362348663713096,0.3926491946642654,0.0,0.06069406884411501,0.0,0.06534530175016584,0.0,0.0,0.08241111044576163,0.0649519626488936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06416417519933358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16892591148148547,0.050110522785810435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684355524019463,0.21023586743884864,0.061614337155872126,0.05428376015981788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16645140344294626,0.0,0.12310559329776913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06195257932115264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04558310895833273,0.09482698452427617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06023267939885369,0.11797429494861494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666288451350289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13652195018921612,0.0,0.05868506936322473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061799592315697975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060699379673852014,0.0,0.0,0.10499903225217426,0.05847702765478136,0.0,0.0,0.18664866421073792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310344690455008,0.05085295094886759,0.06910074160334644,0.0,0.0,0.10417553688289448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870249776950138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976136993222462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04941146650525633,0.16119619914893984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252424664015653,0.2363450959530925,0.0,0.09760894195399203,0.0716934096161918,0.0,0.0,0.05874222299516035,0.0,0.04173765028280264,0.0,0.060052373416543965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14503874916295836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069348814699172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876411039687215
mentalhealth,doIReallyNeedHelp32,2020/01/07,"Should I ask for help? A question I feel like I've been thinking about for the past... Year? Few years? 

Reddit in my experience has a tendency to screech ""THERAPY"" at everyone at the slightest hint of anything which I find overblown, so I don't know where to get an objective opinion. When people do go into depth about some of their experiences with mental health however, I always feel my thoughts are far less worse than anyone else's, so surely I don't need help? Also, I've managed to get where I am and I'm relatively happy and have a stable life, so I don't really have anything to worry about....

But I can't get myself into work today. I don't feel \*that\* bad, but usually I could get myself out of bed and get into work,and if I felt tired then I'd just go in [later](https://later.Today). Today I managed neither of those things and I'm sitting at home feeling somewhat ill, tired and wondering if they'll be annoyed at me for having another sick day.

Most of the time even when I feel like shit I just tell myself to pull myself together and carry on going, like I always have done (or, well, ever since I managed to do that). I felt a bit teary this morning, i don't know. I don't know why I'm feeling this way as I'm enjoying my work.",4.218212043710763,4.940344292490117,5.465501046268312,82.38474773308536,70.50197628458498,8.324482678446875,28.32108811904209,8.4952907291091,1.9573610323180657,978,34,197,15,17,327,141,253,0.11,0.762,0.128,-0.5542,1,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,2,2,16,10,2,0,8,0,22,7,1,0,2,43,50,19,0,5,7,0,8,3,0,2,6,0,2,0,7,11,0,0,16,0,0,4,8,3,1,0,5,8,30,7,31,41,7,33,0,0,0,0,7,15,1,9,15,128,37,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252796241748257,0.1717391695195708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821283410848016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215892992786081,0.10573926272682826,0.16984747258614555,0.0,0.0964768528954008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616660316923985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126662512319849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239576390860197,0.0,0.0,0.0665546235298407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560809904312336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620927096350989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681617674917654,0.0933491316090298,0.0,0.09861077951122957,0.0,0.2018962600731832,0.0,0.0,0.31308217835446056,0.14745034257118142,0.1981738697828127,0.0,0.09432174141176082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26958530465673003,0.0,0.17595059680841127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985693420639343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096953913969387,0.0,0.0,0.1383438253964635,0.0,0.10351670954488848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014591850437796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289229315059853,0.15125301489628007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10400001613989764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652052778623708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851483550520286,0.07154498405555441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560616116845647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611172922271076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593198166191024,0.08536703035442328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726355263287964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020021171502693,0.0,0.11801670632224047,0.0,0.06856063012351106,0.06612555942798576,0.0,0.08192823971049341,0.06017599137040675,0.23722344703869644,0.2934609002322633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11365878730015952,0.0,0.0,0.08191432387316826,0.0,0.0,0.09278802419226134,0.0,0.0931207744428901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11191458705540264,0.2253896461931773,0.10480328836059244,0.105168290935038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329131574876237
mentalhealth,abatedcameron,2020/01/07,"Trust How does one trust another? i feel like it’s more then just deciding too.

I’m talking in relationship context as i feel it affects my mental health by being Paranoid or Anxious.

PS: She has done nothing to not deserve my trust, i’m just a little nervous",1.3299159663865543,4.003474372549022,3.216134453781513,84.98117647058824,89.58823529411768,5.267226890756303,28.85434173669468,6.868970318607317,1.9065047619047624,207,11,37,3,7,69,41,51,0.10300000000000001,0.6759999999999999,0.221,0.8221,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,2,0,9,7,4,0,0,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,2,5,4,4,5,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29911931331172936,0.0,0.3222618832460752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496323900424648,0.29191936729305795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.288471409055622,0.20378934523264053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032173625100755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936331528153,0.2859048210786275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28747434320950965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737140513565228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932991262826905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30626179948549365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292806697681328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BootSkrootMcNoot,2020/01/07,Emergency Somebody on suicide watch said they were about to kill themselves can anybody help me?,6.120000000000001,9.900041000000003,3.7550000000000026,82.39000000000001,76.5,5.7,39.25,7.1686216300943375,3.4769750000000004,80,5,11,1,2,22,16,16,0.445,0.45299999999999996,0.102,-0.8779,0,0,0,0,0,1,1.0,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3450005318729725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5694524481254879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4896088775924912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5630112692601059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,geckosrus,2020/01/07,"High functioning to not? Has anyone ever gone from high functioning mental health to just...not? I have an anxiety and depressive disorder. I've been able to do a lot: hold a full time job, take a college course here and there, hold a steady relationship, etc but I'm feeling like I can handle less and less stresses, and they feel like much smaller stresses too. I'm missing work because I just feel like i can't, and my insurance referral for therapy expired so i can't even schedule an appt without jumping through so many hoops so I haven't been, and I'm not talking to anyone about it because I've lost touch with pretty much everyone as well... 

Has this happened to anyone else? What did you do to get out of the hole? I need help",3.5166321839080474,5.351098910344831,4.340431034482759,85.4655890804598,73.6896551724138,7.591954022988506,29.32471264367816,8.344100000000001,2.1451264367816094,582,25,114,10,12,187,93,145,0.114,0.75,0.136,0.7376,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,2,11,9,0,2,7,0,12,1,0,0,1,21,25,11,0,1,5,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,8,0,2,3,0,0,2,6,5,1,0,5,4,10,4,15,20,7,9,0,3,0,0,5,4,0,1,6,73,13,3,0.13996614715971542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707371947299052,0.0,0.0,0.2936027534072745,0.14341185819915758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706441283795063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055263745425834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041333074334568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692375588821627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15609925246316644,0.09244632014681936,0.12660739331911405,0.0,0.13374365172857158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21231326854835952,0.2999755304923778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312653500126662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237716016880368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14877746931866415,0.0,0.0,0.09381635808139972,0.2957638382979313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388948039252134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20514116861717827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278958361565118,0.11899421307840186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190370466447522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14105295594784675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20578244574738308,0.10378312461431803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239589039963896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150271261181219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3206614973504118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523712366216892,0.11249948726355558,0.0,0.0,0.16006348744781396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161538598676936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12584637555510728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492237115835662,0.0,0.10189702212104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CouchKiwi,2020/01/07,"How will I know the difference between denying my depression, and actually getting better? When this depression started getting really bad, I denied it to myself for a long time. Any good day I had, I was like ""yeah this is right, I'm not depressed,"" and then it would consistently just come back and bite me 5 times worse. 


Now though, I've been swimming in it, encapsulated by it, for a long time. I have no doubt that I'm depressed. But when I have good days.... Which are really just flat days... When do good days start being me NOT being depressed?


When does it go from, *denying* my depression when in fact I'm still depressed, to actually getting better?


If I start actually getting better, how do I avoid shooting myself in the shoot by being like ""yeah but no cos I was crying just yesterday and all it takes is the smallest thing to being me back down and .....""


Any of your thoughts are massively appreciated, thank you",2.7198094373865693,5.400195729885058,3.9861766485178483,82.79490925589839,80.20689655172414,6.881548699334544,25.24984875983061,8.032893268588372,1.7819471264367817,723,28,134,14,19,236,94,174,0.18600000000000005,0.679,0.135,-0.8306,0,1,0,2,0,0,37.0,0,2,0,3,15,19,0,2,5,2,18,0,0,3,2,24,34,17,0,2,8,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,11,6,0,1,2,1,0,3,4,10,0,0,5,0,18,9,14,23,1,31,0,7,0,0,2,5,0,2,25,95,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.2952545484675183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716727977785018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15509978341188582,0.08420821609401323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675894003567622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687610859574907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078251335897492,0.2601679033000212,0.0,0.6080530422807239,0.0,0.0,0.10537013691811742,0.0,0.0,0.08825732201656135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21076655460786065,0.0,0.057317202307148415,0.2537726579337993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05542628561396736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854356633772758,0.0,0.0,0.17850383094653158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921829516246508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612808863602063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21415325927373935,0.0,0.08054150223911634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582906112922116,0.0,0.0,0.09285208393157901,0.0,0.0,0.06700239007499062,0.0,0.09908776486539596,0.08006618179195199,0.17642494999035674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027780351501334,0.07164322539037135,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sleepdeprivedmanic,2020/01/07,"family support. My elder sister was recently diagnosed with clinical depression. She’s always been a high scorer and a topper at school, but the high pressure from my parents combined with her own expectations of herself made her prone to anxiety before an exam, especially if she was half-prepared or unable to study. Now my parents and I are trying to figure out how to navigate this scene, since we as a family are very new to the mental health space. I want to know what I, as the youngest member of my family, can do to provide support for her. Should I research any triggers, be made aware of things I should or shouldn’t say? And how do I prevent my own mental health from getting affected by the grim situation at home, esp since I’ve had tension issues in the past w/ my own exams, and now that my finals are approaching, I need to gear up and give them.",7.2280655957161954,6.858306933734943,7.739477911646593,72.42593708166001,64.0,10.751271753681392,34.107095046854084,10.25414643259724,3.4690315930388227,685,26,122,14,9,227,107,166,0.102,0.851,0.048,-0.8779,2,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,1,0,4,6,0,2,9,0,14,4,0,6,0,28,23,13,0,7,4,3,0,0,0,3,4,1,1,0,4,9,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,6,1,22,2,24,13,3,15,0,2,0,0,13,8,0,3,6,89,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251159065850587,0.0,0.0,0.09195237221594786,0.0,0.10344083224001248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505992730958042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646242615250305,0.13724267053713496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38241239035483293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481238967371672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064543640204371,0.12971271497346026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28745924435300124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28572891397273154,0.13563393468375548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113168677262405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431186874270812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558916778126814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725343851875734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026188345200804,0.0,0.13059367033806946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30028552618085164,0.0,0.12908017288261456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13351072951237186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753019075990912,0.0,0.13684708396902112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237062261763084,0.15198986333764655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3068858838913631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983233787987613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180364226670534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11156839892087696,0.07975464210818854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ghostofstalin56,2020/01/07,"I really need some advice. I would normally never post anything like this asking for advice or help but I honestly dont know what else I can do right now.

I have always had problems with my mental health (i.e: depressive episodes, manic episodes, anxiety, getting trapped in my head, suicidal thoughts, breakdowns, and very rare hallucinations when under stress) but recently it's gotten a lot worse. The frequency of the problems I have went from being maybe once every two to three weeks to now being a nightly endeavor that keeps me from sleeping or keeps me in bed for upwards of 12 to 15 hours. I recently turned 18 and am a high school senior and have never sought out any help for my mental problems and my parents have always dismissed me whenever I try to open up to them.

With the problem severity and frequency increasing I'm honestly scared for my well being and the well being of those around me. 

Does anyone have any similar circumstances or have any advice that might help. The only thing I can think of is going to an inpatient psych ward if it gets any worse.",7.984559090909093,7.943452665000002,7.66690909090909,72.47845454545455,62.35,11.072727272727272,35.18181818181819,10.637119530657019,3.8047,863,34,147,19,11,274,124,200,0.19,0.7140000000000001,0.096,-0.9749,1,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,0,6,12,0,2,9,0,19,3,2,0,2,34,33,13,1,8,6,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,8,11,0,2,3,0,0,3,3,7,2,2,4,0,19,5,24,23,3,24,0,1,0,0,6,9,0,7,12,102,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990326192267981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16975169951485802,0.0,0.0,0.2774660169094305,0.0,0.07803310294167437,0.0,0.0,0.07132386295272063,0.0,0.08394094722379533,0.09080556097043924,0.09536036414204832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785625842325805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892647562986179,0.0,0.11954842183769533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521160490603773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08594312418976352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658619989307856,0.0,0.05797146320286147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468596432285812,0.10842592968551587,0.0,0.0,0.20511423990343933,0.10777327132148898,0.0,0.0,0.1004538075557208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813324325840817,0.0,0.0,0.056058962189448426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983420770620762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672051110499382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247715131910387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20559292954201086,0.10821057116009164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563498575092051,0.15734419584790696,0.0,0.0,0.09572423923158528,0.09994267508687044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863137940531713,0.0,0.07757895874036641,0.0,0.0,0.11326383822007435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09769203878566413,0.0,0.0,0.3904178199716484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534664412792777,0.0,0.20143411985865708,0.0,0.0,0.08711121827509634,0.0,0.0,0.10212422033434206,0.10323391990742256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523596143673935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207808747111123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168457197309187,0.0,0.0,0.11157628069384837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776720485974701,0.06536031428166521,0.0,0.08098011634749458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925430617956138,0.11095151884786077,0.09964349759076617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416433017311863,0.0,0.0,0.08182179379307082,0.0,0.1834284496113998,0.09455912029651067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20790243916093148,0.07246101409827957,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,la-erika,2020/01/07,I can’t speak I’m struggling with self harm and suicidal thoughts. I don’t know what to do. I have severe social anxiety that keeps me from speaking. How do I reach out to someone?,0.4735135135135131,2.9257444594594624,1.966270270270272,94.14562162162164,90.8918918918919,5.122162162162162,23.616216216216216,6.742157984588678,0.8601178378378385,143,6,30,2,5,46,29,37,0.376,0.597,0.027000000000000003,-0.9325,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,7,9,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,5,0,5,8,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590825725983949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010265602568951,0.0,0.0,0.18612485719162408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3533079661125399,0.3826021037148217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3452326806140543,0.2869550437103108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35405271480018524,0.0,0.3704513693980574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688671356348352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hoshgolcrob,2020/01/07,"I'm 14, how can I get a therapist? Early last year I was diagnosed with moderate depression by the NHS (I imagine it should be severe, because I didn't feel comfortable talking about suicide and self harm with my parents present). So I've been slowly going through the NHS and doing interviews with charities but nothing is happening because I haven't done much to worry about. But it feels like every day I think about killing myself which I still don't feel comfortable talking to my parents about. And whenever I ask them about getting a therapist they just say I need to get more sleep or drink more water. What should I do, and how can I get help?",7.167531428571429,7.096566096000004,7.044685714285716,76.36120000000003,64.04,10.662857142857145,37.05714285714286,10.290406445055957,3.818554285714286,522,24,95,11,7,166,81,125,0.19,0.742,0.068,-0.9429,2,0,1,0,0,2,11.0,0,0,2,0,10,6,1,0,4,0,14,4,1,2,0,21,27,10,2,3,4,2,3,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,4,7,2,0,5,1,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,4,16,3,13,20,3,7,0,1,0,0,11,0,0,1,7,66,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647789779770332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19102558335382253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104787885170917,0.0,0.13495124686228133,0.15903042829833391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603415935946828,0.0,0.15349015483583273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201258483798714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23767161732051684,0.11193470537847257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32744259389210384,0.0,0.08904682924200152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855467890762596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050216301071556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17334704977402485,0.0,0.0,0.1277179438554267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654763117667983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518038187474824,0.11617881089727256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15034201941011607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3479569120407784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12460098761283465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16345503513722912,0.1770077278313151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567966292757204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512762500772673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17138629017582446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518724832270002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638431801831397,0.0,0.10039644375848207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15911967379356662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089902040829472
mentalhealth,spontaneouslunatic,2020/01/07,"Can’t get out of bed I can’t get out of bed to go to school. I don’t want to go, I have no friends, I have mini panic attacks, I constantly have a racing mind. I keep telling myself to study from home but I can’t cause I have no motivation. I love science and all I want to do is go to uni but I’m stuck. My parents try but always infer that I’m lazy as I don’t get out of bed and sleep too much and play too many computer games. I play to block out the world, to socialise cause that’s what I love doing but I get less anxious and panicked on there than in real life. I am scared I’ll be a failure in life and never amount to nothing and if that’s the case I might as well end it all now cause I don’t want to be a nobody. I just want to die but I don’t do it cause I love my family too much but then they throw it back at me saying I don’t try hard enough",0.3629999999999996,1.2357219000000017,2.7369999999999983,97.7035,80.0,5.8000000000000025,19.0,5.985473137389443,-0.4488999999999996,660,13,177,4,16,228,98,200,0.182,0.645,0.172,-0.2766,1,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,1,1,8,10,1,2,5,0,20,6,1,6,3,36,38,16,1,5,8,1,1,0,1,1,2,1,4,0,7,10,0,2,2,3,0,4,11,3,1,0,1,2,26,7,26,34,7,19,0,0,0,3,9,9,0,2,6,115,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022937092603128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360814407852198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703653995410905,0.0,0.0926235330958424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.494967599206793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301705710188133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250147213026509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668861338993166,0.12446365695986543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135555696832472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306431264555312,0.0,0.25173398075450604,0.0,0.2053744370780501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790527065376218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082758647362067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706717928793803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17016382944620656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32614980061799403,0.0,0.0,0.12212387903509092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778520045359795,0.12162662157200504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17709862171265753,0.0,0.09290339839759673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11558116056596622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14132962677520947,0.1337525725622816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710574976326964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09579176076297916,0.12059786605584585,0.12190830348232955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054338804032252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528419932252832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635639716629438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841932128111879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830476612034533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dinnyss,2020/01/07,"It gets better, I promise I’ve been suffering with mental health issues since 13/14 and it’s was progressively getting worse. 

2.5 years ago I posted on reddit saying that I wanted to take my life and that high school was not working out etc. 

Now, looking back I can definitely say I have gotten better. Istill do suffer from multiple different mental health issues that make life hard in the daily, but I can assure you, don’t give up and you will get better. 

I am just happy that all those suicide attempts were fails as I now enjoy my life as to the fullest as I possible can even that is a 3/10 it’s better than 1/10.


I am now in university and I have my life planned out, I have a girlfriend (3.5 years and going strong) and everything is well

Until next time...
 Thank you.",4.505011961722488,5.809514644736844,5.247775119617227,82.05033492822969,70.31578947368422,7.632535885167465,25.002392344497608,8.00094639256281,1.4088868421052636,614,17,116,8,11,199,97,152,0.10400000000000001,0.6970000000000001,0.19899999999999998,0.9428,1,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,0,3,0,10,7,14,0,0,4,0,17,6,0,1,2,16,28,11,1,1,3,0,1,0,1,1,6,2,0,0,9,9,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,0,5,4,18,11,15,22,2,19,0,3,1,0,7,7,0,0,10,80,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133239295332752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830235529283447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4522622830768122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335673385058462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257725874454527,0.0844382192711928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148958523568967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20037599291696456,0.1226373817403932,0.07265536884246597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608983804742292,0.11452102828769906,0.0,0.0,0.2717794403712616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350717464525794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26686698447320584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611934172906461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735480751879348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533530939214239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25766867527574505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359610695003956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14412227767186175,0.12243698397101298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033296590166729,0.0,0.12938259815317465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575195293267872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13983804064966102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961210279559362,0.0,0.0,0.1176994363697182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454550756492137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540433096162985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494501713784686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307026048493268,0.0,0.13028158654222327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16465169183475753
mentalhealth,aryabhata5501,2020/01/07,"Abilify No prior history of psychiatric/recreational drug use. I developed depersonalization/derealization disorder in December 2016, and recovered completely in August 2019. What I'm experiencing currently is very, very different to anything I experienced then. 

- September 1st to 5th (2019) : Took 5 mg of Abilify (Noticed my confidence levels beginning to decline, slight depression/dread/panic beginning to creep in, creativity/cognitive abilities seemed slightly diminished)

- September 6th to 15th (2019) : Increased dose to 10 mg (Symptoms listed above became worse, and developed severe restlessness)

- September 15th to 23rd (2019) : Tapered over a period of 1 week. Restlessness improved but other symptoms became slightly worse

- September 23rd to 30th (2019) : Depression continued to increase. On the 30th I started experiencing the worst case of depersonalization I've ever experienced. Severe depression, thoughts and emotions gone, could barely function cognitively. I'm a bit calmer now and the depression has subsided, but the main symptoms haven't improved still. During my previous episode of depersonalization/derealization I could read, think and function more or less normally. I'm profoundly gifted and could make it through a 300 page novel in about an hour. Loved reading, writing, puzzle solving, had very strong opinions, etc. Now my mind is completely blank. I struggle to have conversations (have started stammering a lot because I words don't come to my mind), read and generally do anything I was easily able to do before",10.784776970954354,13.049218128630711,10.261138485477185,48.32332598547722,56.510373443983404,14.489730290456428,47.01270746887967,13.328392162939545,7.874072406639002,1263,77,148,51,16,408,148,241,0.159,0.705,0.136,-0.7979999999999999,2,0,1,0,0,0,54.0,0,0,0,1,5,10,0,3,9,0,14,6,0,2,1,29,30,11,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,3,4,0,5,3,8,0,0,5,4,11,2,25,22,10,28,0,3,0,1,3,7,0,5,16,84,14,3,0.1102597005556182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814686776438612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721329006516426,0.0,0.09382288416215663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203750359946603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497896896756326,0.23121039650795275,0.0,0.0,0.26410019694051257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28489955557029617,0.0,0.0,0.11519791949962482,0.12636716928921288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278662475063702,0.0,0.0,0.12402732257510048,0.0,0.0,0.12296871195507425,0.0,0.09973621163954366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858359492195488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937388544881819,0.09951368457756776,0.0,0.07359920630148155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226617321074752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080310961934391,0.0,0.12553139987894607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33086861518946503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003762903210908,0.0,0.24912415490369985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560847671136617,0.0,0.08805353929197822,0.0,0.0,0.1152673789683346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3438061396878344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064996402446293,0.0,0.08753388611309401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250258429781173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522897986944097,0.0,0.2729274008651091,0.0,0.0,0.08844368102310479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247281092318469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,qu33ni33,2020/01/07,"Thank you for the stories, support and positivity. I’ve had depression and some mental health complications. Been lurking in this sub for a while now and was able to meet different people with very concerning mental health struggles and stories. It made me want to reach out to more people and be of help, in general, and not just in times of need. 

Thank you for everyone who had the strength to open up about their mental health problems. You are so strong for doing that. We wish you continued support in our journey - yes, ours since we are in this together and you are not alone. 

I also wanted to thank those who reach out and give help to those people in need. Thank you for the time you spent with them. You guys are little heroes. ❤️

Hoping that was can continue this 2020 the positivity and love.",3.768176691729323,6.15395269736842,4.092969924812032,85.05578947368423,74.65789473684211,7.237593984962406,24.01503759398497,8.192908349453996,1.4441300751879695,638,20,121,11,14,199,89,152,0.055,0.652,0.293,0.9905,1,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,4,8,2,3,5,14,0,1,5,1,12,4,0,1,0,29,28,12,0,7,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,10,16,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,3,0,0,7,0,16,11,25,20,2,18,0,1,0,1,22,11,0,2,6,86,26,0,0.1241762461489377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860914141389831,0.0,0.09930369918166344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695281885084412,0.0,0.0,0.12973774765890228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11865572465143127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191211703682124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295400664905687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3959806287397995,0.0,0.0,0.1664654405414078,0.0,0.0,0.1233350311059248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12445722091160805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207391031375463,0.11749856656214815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754213486600062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18415022617587115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582645214964609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11881989719617718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271987401632217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298159740284681,0.0,0.0,0.2818274651494431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4572992153964693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14481633545672914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024584078614166,0.14648473454848535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14279655478666095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,D41319,2020/01/07,"I’m so tired. Not just physically. Mentally too.

Tired of waiting to see if new medication will work. It’s not, and I don’t have much hope of it getting better but it has only been a month so I guess I need to just wait it out.


Tired of spending hours awake until I eventually cry myself to sleep at some stupid hour in the morning and having to get up a few hours later, exhausted and pretending everything is okay because god forbid I show any emotion. 


Tired of having to fight the self harm urges every fucking day.


Tired of being told spending time with my young nephew is good therapy. Most of the time, yeah it is. Right now when I have my miscarriage anniversary coming up and being around children is HARD? Not helpful. (Note: id NEVER avoid or ignore him, I just can’t handle caring for him right now)


Tired of the generic “get some fresh air and sunshine” advice. I am in Australia. My city is covered in smoke from the bushfires. There ISN’T any fresh air. Even if there’s a bit of sunshine, it’s not worth spending time outside if you’re going to be breathing in smoke. I’m not just being a pain in the ass and ignoring/dismissing people’s “helpful” advice, our air is literally fucking hazardous. 


I try so hard. I have 3 amazing supports in place. I take my medication. I’ve tried over THIRTY medications. I get out of the house and keep myself busy when I can/when I can actually breathe outside. People tell me to just keep trying.. but I AM trying. I can’t try any fucking harder. I am fucking tired and I want all of it to stop.",2.067526639344262,4.4794133868852475,3.5639088114754145,86.4873386270492,80.70491803278688,5.9108606557377055,23.95747950819672,7.1686216300943375,1.0960020491803282,1213,44,234,16,32,399,163,305,0.191,0.652,0.157,-0.9347,0,1,2,0,1,0,38.0,1,0,0,2,17,21,6,1,11,2,26,20,4,0,2,46,51,20,0,6,16,1,2,0,0,1,12,0,0,2,7,13,0,8,0,2,4,2,10,12,0,0,2,5,28,9,35,44,7,39,0,0,3,5,11,19,5,9,18,149,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.07535843716295197,0.0,0.0,0.15092270094371446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15754271524085275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874477719756908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047074379511979327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829740343348338,0.08430743566766305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873392066474108,0.0,0.0,0.06652071378295585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482575914627742,0.04980239938998392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686539889796263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05100501494430506,0.0,0.06506364655366903,0.0,0.06940298738040168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28556540644979017,0.16138316829231528,0.0,0.04388756898925096,0.06477092730946833,0.0,0.0,0.085069760226191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835314883870498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352180029151113,0.0,0.0,0.07669979076479172,0.228147083017754,0.08910488955270822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372785713062658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23338192391724225,0.07782254734025618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061638603542516976,0.0,0.05676773669277325,0.05725982184594384,0.05955908190697848,0.0745823840557028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05873151574452627,0.08217063889694233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707330854894492,0.0,0.08068152260153061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13189591535434214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615366746938171,0.0,0.08056035450436819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727869642521043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456182474473228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763166237080358,0.0,0.0,0.05806203055524521,0.0,0.06749624189337862,0.0,0.08831114701318074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135087929146208,0.6212947620502222,0.0,0.0737898160174245,0.0,0.2621464917680552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04554808309269223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0562192105408821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigbraintaytay,2020/01/07,"Is Mental Health Education as Important as Sex Ed I remember learning about sexual education as early as the third grade, yet I never had any formal education about mental health. In my opinion, I believe that had I learned about mental illnesses and treatment I would have had less difficulty with it in my teen years. 

It took me two cycling accidents and an appointment for a attention deficit disorder diagnosis to finally get diagnosed with a severe anxiety and depression disorder. There is a lot more to my story, but what makes me question this the most is the fact that there are probably many others out there who are quietly suffering from a mental illness, but really just have no idea. 

I think at least a workshop in at least elementary, secondary, or post-secondary would do the trick, but please share your thoughts. I am really curious!",10.815846736045415,9.617914728476824,10.561929990539266,57.7598675496689,57.34437086092715,15.25108798486282,44.75023651844844,13.925175675911133,6.646179943235572,688,35,106,25,7,227,100,151,0.18,0.754,0.066,-0.9232,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,8,4,1,0,10,0,14,6,0,1,2,27,19,11,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,8,0,0,1,2,3,0,2,5,1,13,1,19,12,6,12,0,2,0,1,4,6,0,5,5,86,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611971217957722,0.0,0.10812883651523142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592478521354096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174057734175953,0.14346259561205787,0.0,0.0,0.3239881251941817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548369659007515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384713248961038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30048708004704544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15956174075577842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016679606856065,0.0,0.0,0.09434914542883696,0.14330204048287715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5697716335527941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901427847983654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551547930599653,0.0,0.0,0.13536981220124295,0.0,0.1523942368472125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15833918527741844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18109895245378269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16011677329895094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15968005840011434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056841867263413,0.0,0.11221245127298757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15703992912610978,0.0,0.0,0.13807390779847695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20081541940007416,0.0,0.0,0.09102179700687893
mentalhealth,jkcsma,2020/01/07,"So my friend tried to end her life and I don't know what can i do to help her She's an internet friend, I've known her for about 4 years now and i love her so much, she's really important to me. She was diagnosed with depression, bipolar disorder along with some other stuff.
She used to tell me about how shitty she would feel or how her family wasn't the best and i, like a dumbass, though that my advice was enough to help her.
She recently tried to commit, left a note on one of her social media accounts and then didn't respond
I cried, really bad, couldn't reach her in any way
Felt so useless and incompetent because I couldn't really do anything
One of her friends later told me that she was ok, in the hospital but ok
And now im like, with really bad anxiety
I got scared of checking my social media because I though i would find bad news about her and now just looking at my phone gives me anxiety
I talk to her, try to not say anything too bad that could make her tired
But i honestly don't know what to do
I want to help her, i really do but I can't really do anything because of the distance.
I feel like she doesn't take it seriously, and thats what worries me the most
Any advice..?",2.2508209523809515,3.8456236440000033,3.9680571428571447,87.81726666666668,76.56,7.961904761904763,23.104761904761904,8.704169506293173,1.4216361904761905,941,28,206,20,21,316,120,250,0.184,0.6679999999999999,0.14800000000000002,-0.9428,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,15,19,0,1,7,2,20,5,0,4,1,39,34,20,0,6,6,0,3,3,3,2,4,1,0,0,10,12,0,0,7,0,2,0,9,8,0,2,8,5,45,11,26,21,5,14,0,2,1,1,37,5,0,3,11,141,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19309151684021186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343741383845973,0.0,0.15116274187460965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439107877214296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3299739267517128,0.18068183157555212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368401254156503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888338626749505,0.0,0.10852664574818112,0.0,0.0,0.08509589144513767,0.10027944444825417,0.0,0.0,0.11323282233844255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750705938350432,0.10208632650298267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313940507673084,0.0,0.09991202313102318,0.07058240482617019,0.09486304378185313,0.0,0.09030098160701618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289968181532661,0.0,0.0,0.0947775130322444,0.0,0.0,0.07901901060488982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19866972946408032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672044777434048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859527702667393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734597972595497,0.0,0.06978503073168134,0.14480538115310598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296672290529869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917043429394468,0.0,0.06594945426301835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262902344744879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389823857822178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3797610575372809,0.0,0.09755261778995457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856935272839079,0.09891556644290136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014273598681456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310182563654518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428495170462257,0.07941132071412024,0.08635514502928805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941400755312382,0.0,0.0,0.11355552710948615,0.0,0.09440718601688966,0.0,0.2012351889277874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533107309184626,0.0,0.0,0.058274523305887324,0.07842246912226558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033571977101603,0.0,0.14036870452656194,0.0,0.0,0.06362365881915227
mentalhealth,throwaway22011960,2020/01/07,"17M, bored of everything I've done multiple things out of my boredom, I have spent more money from my mother than I should have, and I decided to go to another country as an exchange student for 1 year and ruined it less than halfway through by doing some drugs.


 So I came back to my family. They are concerned about me because of the drugs and think I'm depressed. Now their rules are harsher to me, like they don't want me to go out on my own as they think I'll use any opportunity I have to smoke weed, which I don't want to stop doing even if I told them otherwise.


 I'm starting to feel anxious about being in this house. My family loves me, but I just avoid being in the same room as them or stay awake at night so I don't have to see them. They want me to tell them what's wrong with me and why am I doing all of this, but of course I wouldn't say all of this since I don't want to sound like such an entitled piece of sh!t after everything I have done to them.

I want to run away from my house, I feel like I'm dead here, doing the same thing everyday is making me crazy. I want to achieve something great in life, that's what I fantasize all day long, I want to go to the gym, I want people to like me but as of now I don't have any talent.

Thank you for reading my post, I just want to know what you all think about this and get me some advice.

From reading what I've written, I sound like a stupid entitled person, I know, I just want to find peace, that's why I'm writting this here, because I don't want to hurt my family by telling them this, so I just tell them everything is fine and pretend.",6.430119565217392,4.147883307246378,6.8425634057971045,84.40993206521742,66.65217391304347,10.36413043478261,31.12771739130435,8.660442795831766,1.997119565217392,1251,33,297,15,16,410,155,345,0.142,0.73,0.127,0.7297,1,1,4,0,0,0,31.0,0,2,12,2,17,18,1,1,7,0,27,4,0,2,4,53,63,18,1,14,9,1,2,5,0,2,3,3,1,1,16,10,0,2,9,4,3,5,7,7,0,0,6,6,57,11,55,53,12,27,0,3,1,1,22,9,0,4,16,199,73,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487329964993409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812819847238948,0.0910746100902615,0.0,0.09812096396798854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160274592097935,0.06678581811776389,0.0,0.10589150321779574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933851207044868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056014024931719066,0.0,0.07480773067392836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17776480067205713,0.0,0.0,0.2014474986441088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057366637224864236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341779139004768,0.0,0.2456363313827691,0.0,0.08783258028728191,0.06204893609885347,0.0,0.0,0.07938352130671536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04537793822692606,0.0,0.14808439434652132,0.0,0.0,0.09575749155616148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20043706994355254,0.09297963443761767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546602189965364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134796516484139,0.21216382619406435,0.0,0.0,0.07686357856000425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783896580605102,0.0,0.05797611293350322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815071485619677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060214036352116675,0.07583807742065914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318268792255168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17375618718676414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06907025566468965,0.0,0.0,0.06921186273623171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07184701397154651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686490633454649,0.0,0.0,0.06147612549185224,0.09257543604462896,0.0,0.0726143259197271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22774421850285906,0.07996403673681163,0.0,0.0,0.11540465985359648,0.16695874176625802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299328234651776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501447867301088,0.0,0.0,0.5635199593827417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15674551532746134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949618589650696,0.0,0.05593150800355128
mentalhealth,lowieoqbfbciq,2020/01/07,"I feel like I’m 4 people (Rant, sorry) I hear voices, see things, feel things that aren’t there. I hate it so much. There are the voices that come and go, without me being able to “pinpoint” per se, but there are 3 voices that I can easily pinpoint. 

They all have different opinions, mannerisms, etc. It’s getting so difficult keeping up with my friends, and, if it weren’t for me being so freakily good at school, I would 100% be struggling in that. 

The first voice that defends my father to the death (he was abusive), and seems to be a bit *younger* than the others... *if that makes any sense?* 

Then there’s the second voice that hate certain friends of mine. Me and another of my friends talked one of my friends out of suicide, but the other voice still hates her. Guilting me saying I should have let her die, let my other friend isolate herself away from everyone, etc. 

Then the 3rd voice doesn’t talk very much, and whenever he does it’s when there’s a heated argument going on, which he’ll then get yelled at for speaking up and just get quiet again

All of them have different views on situations, religion, politics, etc. which is why I generally try to avoid that stuff while talking to people. They even have different *names* but I don’t like acknowledging them because that just makes me feel like I’m admitting that there’s something wrong.

Which I’m kinda doing with this post, but fuck it. No ones gonna see it anyway, and I just need to get it out there for my own sanity. I’m going insane, and I want out. Everything is getting worse, and I haven’t even gotten into how sometimes it’s like the world doesn’t even exist, that it’s all fake and that it’s either a simulation, hell, or I’m just a brain in a jar getting the right stimulation to make me hallucinate all of this.

Fuck it, once I kill myself, I’ll be killing all of us.",3.760103718199609,5.239471498630137,4.462147749510767,86.28922945205483,72.36986301369862,7.625244618395302,25.91242661448141,8.192908349453996,1.4981056751467716,1447,47,295,22,28,463,183,365,0.217,0.68,0.10300000000000001,-0.9956,5,1,1,0,0,2,59.0,1,0,4,1,22,25,8,3,14,0,26,3,1,5,6,57,63,26,5,6,13,1,3,4,5,4,0,12,0,0,34,17,0,2,6,0,0,4,8,14,0,4,3,18,34,11,35,49,13,28,1,0,3,2,25,15,3,6,12,203,68,1,0.0847902414166963,0.10046257107590384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057660271744623716,0.0889099611227467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966322293505433,0.0,0.0,0.051687344173050376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256898314704053,0.0,0.0,0.09465395123748294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303928513941757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799888393782855,0.2657632667924917,0.0,0.0,0.07420051165510469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28369059740312325,0.16800946433974728,0.0,0.0,0.08102070927962231,0.07620400167899867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286174811659357,0.12114833081995832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212253603392697,0.0,0.0,0.3275436509362584,0.15677442379597611,0.2657964093124,0.0,0.14456474456696625,0.07111803165456851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511384276632618,0.0,0.0,0.09556476444365893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536546244742262,0.18761567881632385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17340753312637386,0.0,0.16569691614268686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697944336579792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466116706297925,0.06287088963723242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029883985466204,0.11491212394529787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175657546226005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120561308964044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724104028838505,0.0,0.0674286032056522,0.0,0.08581225104864207,0.1351336891590874,0.07718985128700331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530778392421904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527567031896978,0.08385971684197174,0.09491573338668216,0.0,0.0,0.06771359632339359,0.0,0.0,0.08864117026387941,0.09706454053459103,0.09274676209680432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044535527604393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266173756657373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575670081443139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199222047721944,0.0,0.0,0.06996082912121569,0.05001148122697137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651000460017161,0.0,0.0,0.08173476697887425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640849983659363,0.060232554751548074,0.09270481839406633,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MythicHorizion87,2020/01/07,"mental hospital i’ve been considering admitting myself to a ward. my parents don’t know anything about my mental health issues and if i tell them and can get myself into a ward then i feel like i can get actual help. then again, lots of people have had negative experiences .",5.087500000000002,6.9126181346153865,6.4992307692307705,71.62076923076923,69.57692307692308,9.815384615384616,26.461538461538463,10.125756701596842,2.9505230769230764,221,7,37,6,4,75,40,52,0.073,0.825,0.102,0.128,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,8,11,5,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,8,1,4,9,1,4,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,4,28,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.2526721494077829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21307211672394216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532770304875864,0.0,0.0,0.13091958613375554,0.18497511988220636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705538593010009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752237508621436,0.0,0.0,0.17355107652815555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27024903851318577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229767628434858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649702525887405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22012764301145696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5218683149262168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875040913403957,0.0,0.0,0.17950506959667464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22631069802137546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,darkfire198,2020/01/07,"Scuicidal friend crisis I just found out that a really close friend has been cutting herself for the past couple weeks, and has been very scuicidal for the past couple days. I’ve been texting her for almost 3 hours and it’s not getting much better. Is there anything I can say or do that you recommend to help her at all please.",5.9251562500000015,6.512503703125002,5.7687500000000025,82.20125,66.65625,8.9,28.5,8.841846274778883,2.0761375,263,8,50,4,4,82,49,64,0.111,0.695,0.193,0.7090000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,2,4,1,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,1,10,10,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,1,6,3,6,6,2,8,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,2,5,34,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21948457010669936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18037259577425965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938534878814612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4850534899162171,0.0,0.14135777264236085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24032772604058825,0.33868736106518466,0.0,0.1145163962539774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691672779201853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21585548678555952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16112799614334078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4184784461443222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24060199988481085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041709340098854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17430665817178387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18085260182319945,0.0,0.0,0.17581895160195096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Due_Sell,2020/01/07,"Help with Nightmares I have had nightmares since I was young, when I was 14 when I was diagnosed with night terrors.  I have dreams that are either memories, being hurt or watching someone I love being hurt. Some night I wake up every two hours.  I used to take  some medicine and smoke weed to help with my bad dreams but I haven't done that in years. My boyfriend didn't like that type of ""lifestyle"" or being with someone who was self medicated to function.   The main reason I am asking for help is cause I keep having bad dreams, so I have become more afraid to sleep, so I can't fall asleep. I have other mental illness's and I am almost always sleep deprived, so I am all over the place. I wake up twitching, gasping for air, yelling, or just wake up and cry. A few times my nose will bleed or I'll get physically sick. 
The main way I am dealing with my troubles now is mostly over the counter sleeping medicine and drinking liquor or waiting until I am so sleep deprived that I pass out. But it's been taking its toll on me. I'm worried about me   like I don't wanna drive cause I could fall asleep and I am also paranoid af. 

If you have any advice I would appreciate it 
On  managing my nightmares safely and appropriately",4.440762527233115,5.5035264773662576,4.698286129266524,86.83758169934644,70.23456790123457,6.869910433309128,27.874364560639076,6.794906146795322,1.2096678286129268,966,33,195,7,17,303,138,243,0.17300000000000001,0.7290000000000001,0.09699999999999999,-0.9661,0,0,2,0,1,0,22.0,0,1,0,0,10,13,0,2,5,0,32,19,10,4,1,37,41,22,0,4,10,0,0,2,0,2,6,1,0,1,9,12,2,3,1,5,0,4,4,9,0,1,8,3,32,4,24,27,9,26,0,4,1,1,9,11,0,10,12,135,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11921339426626425,0.0,0.0,0.12216169449944785,0.0,0.0,0.09756041490578056,0.10151071311530513,0.0,0.0,0.08296168262891034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405009310256972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037236667418795,0.0,0.13473535326929886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506476569703917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974041364639226,0.0,0.13400723159349864,0.0,0.1257728515004333,0.0,0.12382369918098934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248445939806128,0.0,0.11950995141622685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102787163236578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06373804321440588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453146898936285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120141803225202,0.0,0.2611991725233565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843593669547903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920248165410778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010644397366133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289846010173378,0.12294359908571935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289705685324883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746019126023808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254325378327218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272687706184235,0.0,0.0,0.10091661852162263,0.0,0.4883377065326892,0.0,0.20673417606516298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834521035523676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113703662965869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917268017521708,0.0,0.0,0.1053656527860804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683500221859176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238931871869842,0.0,0.08666268715066056,0.0,0.0,0.07856163178568314
mentalhealth,rikivip,2020/01/07,"Can I still save my mom? Sorry for the long post and my bad English.
My mom is 65
This all started 2 months ago with minor dizziness but nothing significant. Weeks later it started to worsen to the point she couldn't even walk by herself, wouldn't leave bed throughout the day, she needed the help of two people to go to the bathroom and would cry almost every day for not being able to perform any task by herself. She had lost her appetite, ate 80% less than usual and would usually throw up the food. 

A week later it became worse, she started to develop panic, she would get scared and scream by insignificant things like for example turning the lights on without notifying her or something that accidentally fell and hit the floor making a noise, she was aware she shouldn't get scared by those things but she said she couldn't control it and that she wasn't crazy. 

Days later she woke up happy, and was VERY talkative (5x more than when she was fine) was very positive and could finally eat by herself in bed without making a mess. After this day she was never the same... Next day she denied all food and all liquid, she wouldn't open her mouth and kept spitting everything, then started to act differently, she was not the same person, wouldn't talk, would scream for whatever reason and call her mom for help (her mom is an elderly handicapped woman) when we were trying to feed her or give her the prescribed medication. 

Fast forward to today, she's with sedans, it's been over three weeks since she ate so we decided to get her a nasogastric feeding tube but she took it off. Last time she wasn't on sedants she had an arrhythmia due to her extreme panic, now she doesn't speak at all, she seems to understand when people talk to her and laugh at some jokes but won't reply. It's just like if she wasn't there anymore, sometimes she gets aggressive and bite people who try to open her mouth to give her the medication. When she is barely conscious she would ask for food to then deny to eat. 

She's being treated by two psychiatrist, a doctor, a cardiologist and a nurse. 
The psychiatrists say she isn't cooperating and that she is the only one that could stop this. 

It's unbelievable how she was completely fine 2 months ago being a regular 65 yo adult and now she gave up and is on the edge of death. 

My question is, is it still possible for her to recover? What are your recommendations?",7.667077922077922,6.970669354978355,7.472045454545455,75.7780681818182,63.24242424242425,10.470562770562774,32.66991341991342,9.725611199111238,2.8409809523809515,1910,62,365,32,24,609,227,462,0.133,0.779,0.087,-0.9768,1,0,1,0,0,0,45.0,2,1,0,3,13,19,1,4,25,0,42,15,3,5,5,71,69,32,1,15,12,4,0,2,0,10,3,5,2,3,20,23,9,3,6,1,0,7,17,10,0,4,22,6,56,9,51,29,9,65,0,1,0,0,72,16,0,7,45,249,76,1,0.07421246305694408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315697415523744,0.0,0.07431306178345114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05046701973251642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359882186879613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937863501212259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06196430679589553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577922223193251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781035556400992,0.0,0.0832355877321811,0.11850522605578136,0.0,0.08151890591925212,0.2393044961392064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753622857691599,0.0,0.07595960059009706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15187575373793347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049016631934703084,0.0,0.06252720088276134,0.0,0.06669737654833938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129612580234599,0.0,0.0,0.26921401471974543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550917957631909,0.14238271375425254,0.04217665298214359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900054689926016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948609931097382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049306239690822,0.0,0.0785802829435551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251292166663953,0.0,0.0,0.0656756944753751,0.0,0.0,0.08101167003349438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907479071946007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952249796555375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34766695918999496,0.11847135996771167,0.0,0.0,0.055027601014019066,0.05723722656274135,0.0,0.07892579638309719,0.0,0.0,0.07120885982433478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05028828560102518,0.05644192229646815,0.0,0.17414467085780144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15434873298945678,0.06479946023318194,0.0,0.0,0.0701547651767366,0.08366340146923057,0.07107502538900362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313494294382517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763027720908067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059304685019374,0.059016729293041525,0.14859924397771318,0.0,0.0,0.06756023914185641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061389316331136916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05713237975413885,0.07339802357108448,0.08307477652840911,0.21011185328462445,0.0,0.11853233772284424,0.062044942129728525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929833337406763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860692571921502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04327388400932295,0.0,0.07034473754244149,0.0,0.08245277708690724,0.10077078196329901,0.08072184916072646,0.14498958582799285,0.07725779128535844,0.0,0.0,0.16346908679883265,0.12246610835970635,0.0,0.0,0.178586284312547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307633221794824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562884000311905,0.2635920224803382,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ilikedogs14,2020/01/07,"How to deal with a parent who gets mad at their child for having depression ? So my sister has been really depressed lately, and has been recommend by her school counselor to go see a therapist. My mother got extremely mad, and told her to stop crying at school and to stop being “weak”. I feel really bad for her because she probably feels alone, and like if no one is there to help her. My mom has issues of her own as well. I have no idea how to approach this situation. My mom blames my sister for being depressed, and also says that she has no reason for being depressed. All she does is call my sister weak. How can I deal with this situation? I feel like my mom doesn’t believe in depression, or she is in denial. What can I do ??",3.659240348692403,5.006145945205482,4.94252801992528,83.26729140722294,72.42465753424658,8.048816936488171,23.546699875467,8.575989854853784,1.4487890410958908,572,15,114,10,11,190,82,146,0.29600000000000004,0.637,0.067,-0.991,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,7,13,2,0,2,0,18,2,0,4,1,20,26,13,0,1,2,8,3,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,5,7,0,2,5,0,0,2,4,10,1,1,4,5,22,3,19,19,2,9,0,5,1,0,26,4,0,2,5,86,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110978208668545,0.0,0.09351317671570544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763615328821278,0.07128271892172701,0.0,0.0,0.13174612355767262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940409149204904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844801799262132,0.0,0.24111047292607035,0.5035813334176684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023309342118788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773781165400288,0.0835386548858333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061093906830739085,0.0,0.06645706808780276,0.0,0.09352390121304502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837931661502917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200580435341294,0.0,0.12205015018213275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190819574804408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425743466380793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.410859891879356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923843605183929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298428949798496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607611146979972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14982359037315984,0.12022904051380502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299170322044244,0.0,0.23668968368974055,0.0931823537782554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628805206077917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955264181519976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577098255233794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173676146102972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10513894502203276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luvduck44,2020/01/07,"Will removing my hearing cure schizophrenia? Usually it's something or anything someone says to me my brain will morph into something mean against me, which flares up my anxiety so bad I'll lose sleep over it.  I'm 32 now and this has not gone away, probably caused from too much bullying now my brain is broken.  It makes me insane enough that I have to avoid people or I'd end up killing them or jumping off a tall building.  But if I got my hearing removed I believe it would be cured bc it couldn't get to me if I can't hear what they're saying.  Yeah I thought about ear plugs and earbuds but I could still hear partway with those.  Many will probably think that's insane but they don't suffer from the same ailment!  I would love to tune out almost everyone around me!",3.271908091908092,5.144610766233768,3.5884415584415583,90.43453046953049,74.45454545454545,6.556643356643357,27.43056943056943,7.321109707123232,1.3523002997002993,614,24,125,7,13,190,106,154,0.133,0.7959999999999999,0.071,-0.6895,0,1,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,1,7,6,1,1,2,1,13,5,4,2,0,27,26,11,1,6,9,0,0,0,0,5,0,7,0,0,11,6,0,1,3,0,0,4,4,5,0,0,3,7,19,1,17,15,3,18,0,2,0,1,9,9,0,6,5,81,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12955803706643992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897737492967712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647089878678552,0.11517799132745815,0.0,0.0,0.1215592609211837,0.0,0.10802911041470033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14576994329659634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888676589215713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291162407923665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330151995783338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459462719694725,0.13368686606466393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363066891444065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759709579299975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347912643315184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5832946098778257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14314273521629614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474609320494994,0.0,0.0,0.11677289520290653,0.0,0.08636392513193446,0.13117370209623538,0.0,0.14093563825877545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511113645315404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969764036044273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789927646252596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205780556413318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947609097749616,0.0,0.10962550149331532,0.19921017372289174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332515331569786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290317939827778,0.0,0.1027153738018823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249671254573826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18381944815268286,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xsaintzx,2020/01/07,"My mom have OCD, my experience with it since I was a kid and understanding mental health We all have friends, family members, co-workers, relative, or people who are close to us, going through mental health issue at some point of their life.

I personally went through the experience of it, from my mother since my early childhood.

When I'm age 3, my mom suffer from serious OCD.  
As we're from a lower class family, we couldn't afford to get a proper diagnostic on her, or get a psychiatrist to treat her.

Fact is, we're quite uneducated and we did not realize it was a mental health issue.  
All the time, our family take it as 'effect from work stress', 'bad temper', 'releasing tantrum'.

It was until I'm 14, we get her to a psychiatrist, and diagnose with OCD.

It didn't strike me as much when we learned that, as her disease comes and go, it's not 'Active' all the time.  
I was a teenager then and don't care much about mental health and don't understand the seriousness of it.

It's usually triggered by an event, a negative one, which will then cause her to be in 'Active' mode.  
It would then last for few months, or worst case,  2 years.

When it's triggered, she repeatedly do the same thing over and over again.  
Checking the trash bin, asking for the same questions, clean up the house over and over again.  
I can't count how many times she has the suicide thoughts and actually taking the action to do it, while I'm there with her experience this since I was still a kid.

I'm now at my 30, with experience in the industry and outside world, I learned that mental health is a very important thing that most people would neglect.

It sickens me when people react negatively towards people who suffers from mental illness or disease.  


**No one chose to get this.**  
**People who suffers from depression, OCD, ADD, ADHD, didn't get it by choice.**

​

To raise awareness about this, and with my personal experience of helping my mother to get better and changing her life (she still has OCD, but it rarely triggers now as we have the knowledge and ways to best prevent the disease from striking again).

Me and my partner, who also have very close friends suffering from mental illness, talk about how understanding mental health is so important and how it would change your life, any your loved ones.

We decide to share the talks to the public, hoping it could help someone out there who is listening.  
We're not professional by any means, just concerned citizens who have real life experience dealing with the matter, especially with close and loved ones.

If you'd like to listen it or share it with your friends, here's the links below (I'm not sure if this is allowed, but moderator if it's not allowed, please search 'After 5 at Jumix' in Google, it's Episode 4.

Apple Podcasts: [https://podcasts.apple.com/my/podcast/after-5-jumix/id1489121336](https://podcasts.apple.com/my/podcast/after-5-jumix/id1489121336)

Spotify: [https://open.spotify.com/show/2DiLYBAJaNKa612KvVdvKD?si=pTZGJ4jHS16e0ThWARAO1w](https://open.spotify.com/show/2DiLYBAJaNKa612KvVdvKD?si=pTZGJ4jHS16e0ThWARAO1w)

YouTube: [https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLsfr7x-MH9yG43fVnsrTqSXk9T3zJM\_FP](https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLsfr7x-MH9yG43fVnsrTqSXk9T3zJM_FP)",9.893626336898397,11.70434556628788,7.3842736185383275,69.7806016042781,58.29924242424242,9.469340463458108,31.81729055258468,9.5536054971066,2.9016691622103385,2641,86,405,43,34,757,245,528,0.076,0.815,0.109,0.9673,4,0,0,0,0,1,157.0,9,4,1,5,23,28,2,2,28,0,34,15,0,11,5,95,63,45,1,9,16,4,0,1,4,4,13,2,1,6,37,37,0,2,13,0,1,5,14,14,0,4,10,2,42,14,65,45,12,55,0,6,0,2,57,20,0,12,30,279,79,5,0.0,0.0,0.056913132769952315,0.0,0.07009081599731191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04663948723452773,0.0,0.06319105635005462,0.07086670944061242,0.07932090780185364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545225014314574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04869581255653357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061204559881877035,0.05158041137514178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059462407249791877,0.059911995090040436,0.12339231113923405,0.0502385978002023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0465647771546136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06012665390639954,0.05023201220697108,0.05919484703771565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3422962751732997,0.16494026867727338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517657279903458,0.0,0.18282269437187007,0.0,0.06629062742993427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719566064793757,0.0,0.0,0.07818301687752867,0.0,0.0,0.057926166459436663,0.0,0.06729489889233481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174447754453728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04753960755429056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16477611109286835,0.02849281968921483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527442084186026,0.0,0.0,0.059128599551585725,0.0,0.0635289450856281,0.0,0.0,0.4701928687501352,0.0,0.0,0.13661029996334462,0.04655147000440133,0.0,0.08574566716290265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807996932706153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20216307738664427,0.10184774210977196,0.0,0.06401922538184675,0.0551324378766436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533315400147077,0.06203183450464556,0.0,0.06638235730821218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14473183654978633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0494154108243777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315086052123303,0.0,0.06680680153233151,0.0,0.0,0.06379398798000825,0.0,0.05496709343747278,0.0,0.0877006524627946,0.09375283256901144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749210182267365,0.0,0.0,0.0463005625995612,0.1020227798845036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821434524567041,0.0701532898839848,0.0,0.06423262375680247,0.0962422879490264,0.0,0.04629269826487665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406438847112728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491713772716432,0.0,0.0,0.12428924051757845,0.0,0.07086670944061242,0.03755697663166596
mentalhealth,Acceptable-Parking,2020/01/07,"Does anyone else feel like they're not living in their real life? I don't suffer from any mental illnesses per se, but I just feel so disconnected and hazy about my life and everything that has been happening. I look over the calendar and I'm surprised that I've been awake every single day. I feel like this world and this life is not mine, but this temporary layover that is hard. It's like I can't make any decisions and I can only be unproductive. I'm too tired and unproductive and get by doing the bare minimum. It's like there's something wrong but there really isn;t . I feel satisfied and can trudge through and have enjoyable moments. But it doesn't feel like my life. I'm just never really here",3.5405155875299776,5.5873133093525205,4.632535971223022,82.48079436450844,74.17985611510791,8.662110311750599,23.813549160671464,9.2995712137729,2.00914340527578,566,17,110,14,12,185,83,139,0.08,0.736,0.184,0.9357,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,8,9,0,0,2,0,13,6,0,1,1,26,25,14,0,0,8,0,6,5,0,0,6,0,0,0,9,9,0,0,6,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,2,7,11,7,6,22,1,6,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,8,65,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20563955342585213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572110768427327,0.15492014629893333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751015609736538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231432682372146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630646862457034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273907765373255,0.0,0.1358869495441921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3822510801842673,0.3240474926797391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07899467758794326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13370382952946494,0.0,0.1354436463410373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.427182275636969,0.3693383547355557,0.0,0.13351054163469825,0.0,0.12696818042933544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092579187008416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523719505885726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166131641226356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499283846222493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720963449676644,0.19372253029071287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639955282744302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737797776012282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16531120022650642,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VivaciousZipper,2020/01/07,"Is it normal to cry every time my boyfriend does something sweet? Every time my boyfriend gives me something, compliments me, or sometimes when he looks at me and smiles, I start crying. It's like an instinctual response. Is this normal?",5.127142857142856,7.980685761904766,4.238333333333333,83.37750000000003,72.33333333333333,6.104761904761905,29.54761904761905,7.1686216300943375,1.8589333333333324,190,8,31,2,4,56,32,42,0.12,0.6559999999999999,0.225,0.6662,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,3,2,5,0,5,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,5,17,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4994820476576522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989616708675328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3831162106390242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181015821270724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107516160597268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19092264557931451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4455232378551303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500611018432773,0.224861918188795,0.0,0.1609244774759718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265147427475124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bay03,2020/01/07,"Not well Right now I’m in bad mental state. Almost worst it’s ever been. My family life is a mess, my work life is a mess, and my school life is a mess. My best friend (pretty much only friend) is moving to home-study so I won’t have her for lunch or break or anything (in hs). I constantly have mental breakdowns at school and I always went to her and now I have no one. It is the 6th day if the year and I have cried every night.",-0.245000000000001,1.6310915212765984,1.7589787234042582,99.19400000000002,85.91489361702128,4.611063829787233,12.591489361702127,5.6839178017228535,-1.2954476595744682,329,3,81,2,10,109,60,94,0.212,0.7140000000000001,0.073,-0.9005,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,5,9,0,0,5,0,11,4,0,0,1,10,13,8,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,5,1,1,2,0,11,4,6,10,3,15,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,4,7,53,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17330247480776778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400633418246514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142420112812414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450444457219044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18162405485580824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18702488679382748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901069314112696,0.11161446027994458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654979909054428,0.14581714702270673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631529876422563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674236181166384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.173601187310873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.366728869929994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3488234191680352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18394375930463888,0.12722479980657692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624124744970739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727526950636652,0.1316259158502862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17607224545880604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477990175746923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.350307853450455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560880208447447,0.16043565179419444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599547248213724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145003570212443
mentalhealth,CommitOrEatShit,2020/01/07,"19M Scary thoughts with High Fever during flu season Hey, not sure where else to post this but I just woke up middle of the night sweating, shaking and had the intent to cut myself in half for about 5 minutes, (the idea came from joey Diaz who was talking about that on jre while I was asleep) I just walked around hyperventilating until I calmed down, the same thing happened when I woke up yesterday morning accept the scenario was different and I don't remember what harm I wanted to cause.

Is this normal to experience this with a high fever?
I have a feeling that the underlying cause of all the flu symptoms comes from depression, although I haven't been diagnosed I am seeing the doctor tomorrow so I'll have more information then.

Thanks",5.11935064935065,7.073842571428571,5.219350649350652,80.31110389610393,69.71428571428572,7.948051948051948,27.72727272727273,8.575989854853784,2.058071428571429,600,21,108,10,11,188,99,140,0.127,0.76,0.113,0.0102,1,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,0,8,8,1,1,10,0,11,9,2,3,2,25,21,9,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,6,0,0,4,3,4,0,1,9,2,11,4,21,12,3,24,0,1,1,0,4,11,0,0,8,77,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16540834840767826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21251463996795766,0.0,0.3817516171231862,0.0,0.1600569796032111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003599832173354,0.18859102044628928,0.0,0.1941296189262776,0.0,0.19018217144414945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521858663770266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18175569625952476,0.0,0.0,0.09395001388772134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643092366812854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3926323150535537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20975440591282124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743680468978376,0.1820522074297416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17795252422234314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21048403270683844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14806477150041286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512166617703556,0.1931254637584296,0.0,0.1493452829826105,0.0,0.1710668714813911,0.0,0.0,0.12344245564106578,0.0,0.0,0.14751064974160813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959426307900423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ok_then-x,2020/01/07,"Sadness I’m not sure if I should be posting this here but I just feel real sad and it won’t go away it’s been this way for a few days now and i can’t talk to my friends about it because that’s not how are friendships is. And I don’t think it’s depression.
Can someone give me some advice I hate this feeling and I just want it to go away",-1.0947435897435902,0.7616959358974391,1.1028205128205144,102.59217948717951,89.64102564102564,3.97948717948718,18.923076923076927,5.033348758259628,-0.7402923076923078,265,8,69,1,9,88,54,78,0.24600000000000002,0.6629999999999999,0.091,-0.9315,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,1,0,9,0,0,1,1,19,18,7,0,3,6,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,5,4,0,0,1,2,8,2,6,14,2,8,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,2,2,48,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393003143323871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46015797264437897,0.0,0.0,0.149280575337966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793157363351018,0.0,0.21092043715278733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476440076922061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891987504575897,0.0,0.0,0.23491750472939235,0.2783493533773648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417747811116407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345336336513568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787345202296627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20749158943140814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23080268672257026,0.0,0.0,0.19683054252626309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15691342094626345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14444043915413218,0.19437955451155167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sabrefoxx,2020/01/07,"I have issues with my parents that thought I resolved but I haven’t. Can you share as many resources for therapy, counseling, or other that you know of? Please don’t ask exactly what it is I’m going through. It’s such as sensitive subject that in my 30’s I started to cry tears when I realized I hadn’t got past this. It’s very emotional, and no I wasn’t sexually abused or anything. It’s like I hate my parents and I love my parents, but like oil in water, I can’t resolve the two. Ideally I would only love my parents but I have no idea how to get to that point. 


I don’t want to cause any potential emotional harm to my parents by letting them know how distraught I am about this n directly talking with them, and how I may never forgive them for some things... I myself was no perfect angel. We’re all just humans. In itself that doesn’t forgive anything it’s just a reminder I told myself whenever I resented them about this or that. 
But, it seems I’ve just been burying the issue. 


I know very well that deep seeded parental issues can spill over in to my future children if I don’t take care of it now. If I’m ever going to get married I don’t want to burden my wife with this either. And while the Reddit community can be very friendly and supportive this doesn’t seem like the right place to take a trip down memory lane.",2.9071828171828185,4.451222523809523,4.377750582750584,85.77823426573428,74.67765567765571,7.307958707958707,27.42740592740593,8.00094639256281,1.7184446886446882,1051,41,214,16,22,350,143,273,0.152,0.642,0.20600000000000002,0.9390000000000001,6,0,0,0,1,0,24.0,0,2,4,4,13,21,2,1,6,0,23,3,0,4,5,48,48,21,0,6,13,7,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,2,23,8,1,0,12,0,0,3,14,5,1,1,7,1,37,16,28,37,3,21,1,0,0,2,24,10,0,9,11,151,60,0,0.0,0.11196554473767784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642623781819357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15552880905646072,0.0,0.08834355792210355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096347755167903,0.0970762285204326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380241965794808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125967083798762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547951314520466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300948584072663,0.0,0.09874337423800901,0.0,0.10741161410965812,0.0,0.0755792685125173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329793360433376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667756587388603,0.0,0.2958963736423502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15580209506727788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966313558381956,0.0,0.13850192125223545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17057759000750575,0.0,0.0,0.0958068819697356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288324769235616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187054387509417,0.0,0.0,0.6295779515294103,0.0,0.09020973233938566,0.0,0.0,0.09873106179084327,0.10373123017401152,0.08933184632156095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807014006981714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17205619276934106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688668881107053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723604108336432,0.0,0.0,0.14210257173165922,0.07595450114145967,0.0,0.0,0.10806753555755504,0.0,0.06278075845881015,0.0,0.0,0.07502143750653995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029758797106643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231152984963584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339140515407928,0.11147560088792244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849657088067946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712918783059736,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Thisisathrowawaynjce,2020/01/07,"I think I have just lost one of my closest friends So much shit has been going on with me so this is kinda a rant as well.

14m. This is a throwaway.

​

Basically I've been feeling super shit, sad, and self-deprecating of recent.  Idk why but I just have. I also hate myself. 

There is this person who I used to count as an old friend. One time I was really depressed over text and all of it just came spilling out. She tried to help me for some time but it wasn't really working. She told me that she was ""sick and tired of this shit"" and that she has ""given up"". I then told her that since she said I should go to a helpline that I would with no real intention of doing so. I just told her that so we could keep being friends. 

I decided that I wouldn't try to rant to her again. No more than 2 days later and she pressures me into telling her more things. For some stupid reason, I did. Now she has reacted with something that basically said I give up this is not how friendships work. I just feel so shit now. 

She was just about my closest friend. I have tried and tried time again to help her through her bad things and when she has wanted to talk or not I have done as she has asked. I genuinely enjoyed talking to her. The reason why I think this is my fault is that she has problems. Genuine really bad problems that are hard to explain but that must be why she reacted in this way. 

I just feel super bad now and Idk what to do.",1.1912639821029103,3.260186493288593,2.3806442953020124,95.68689485458614,81.71812080536913,5.4498434004474285,20.000447427293068,6.588339656340683,0.018638568232661967,1117,30,254,11,30,356,143,298,0.244,0.652,0.10400000000000001,-0.9940000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,1,0,0,5,23,24,6,1,5,0,34,6,4,7,2,56,56,24,0,8,13,0,4,0,4,4,2,2,0,1,23,15,0,1,9,0,0,3,6,16,1,2,16,6,48,8,33,33,6,27,0,3,0,0,39,9,4,4,14,190,71,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430191043744537,0.0,0.10067040801197752,0.11289858036764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686043218731063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23273359878894198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626688718120632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418288893880325,0.0,0.0,0.05992072906993946,0.0,0.08002520382196525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508151281957186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14093770943947068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28713516381083737,0.0,0.0,0.08912991766511077,0.10560837080761512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08323114597972915,0.0917316330207236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455427497630896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258469651168522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142472059439613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830121062330659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749580005214298,0.0,0.12591952033938755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112741221234976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17780899266413286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057545067453018,0.17856594200355172,0.19105858049064445,0.09173965968780567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676169494414212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692776322349964,0.0,0.3814924485394538,0.0768579916176552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152840635257449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14935872973411427,0.08120942109760355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345357015364275,0.11906886466891264,0.0,0.0,0.16253367914271732,0.10678898884214666,0.0,0.26634497300485593,0.0,0.2523253353616997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802463714822767,0.0,0.0,0.05480206536396725,0.07374943688999537,0.0,0.0,0.08353929094147168,0.0,0.2515166219972779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528248135063073,0.0,0.0,0.06600221232305561,0.0,0.11289858036764,0.0
mentalhealth,tall_boizz,2020/01/07,"Anxieties keeping me from sleep, got work in 7 hours I deal with anxiety that Im able to numb out during the day but when Im trying to sleep its all just there, how shitty my job is and how little forward momentum I have, how little I've accomplished and how little autonomy I have for my age (21M), it drives me into this state of mind of just being the opposite of what I want to be. Im currently laying next to my sleeping gf and I feel like I cant even talk to her at all (when shes awake just in case yall thought I was stupider than I am) about how I feel because she'll think less of me, no matter how open minded she claims to be she'll think of me as lesser for showing vulnerability anymore than I do, and for all I know that lack of patience is justified. I hate this feeling of ""oh shit I need to get all of these things done!"" (writing resumes, finding better jobs, finding that last class for spring that will let me get financial aid and fulfill major reqs, stop staying over at my gf's so much and confront my home with my dad, get enough money to pay for my own phone, etc) when Im supposed to be asleep.
Then in my head theres someone telling me how Im complaining over nothing and Im just overreacting because im a pussy or that Im lucky i get to worry about half of those things. Then i feel upset because I feel that for all the things my parents did, they never prepared me to be my own person or do what I want to do, and now I dont even have a feeling of want to do anything.
These feelings anger me because I wanted to be an NYPD cadet, and them having a problem with me seeing a therapist in the past year makes me feel so useless. I figure maybe I can apply to be in the national guard as theyre always recruiting at my campus I just want to stop being a useless, talentless, low on the food chain, piece of shit.  I could really care less what the job is if it can give me something more than what my life is with better pay and maybe even benefits. Seriously has me in a state of shock, once my parents got divorced they stopped giving a shit about me because I distanced myself from them for my own well being, my dad just gets drunk and gets bitter and goes on about how I dont appreciate him, looking at me like Im a fucking skidmark, meanwhile I have fucking classmates my age who own multiple boats and cars, already got married, and have fucking kids who get to have undivorced grandparents. Sure whatever I dont know the rest of the stories and theres undoubtedly something going on to make me more wrong and be reason for me to be more appreciative of my life, but I need to remind myself that I need to make my life better and nobody I know now wants to/ is going to help me do that, not my bickering parents or my siblings who are already figuring their lives out, not my gf since I might as well be dead to her when I enlist, and not my therapy group since Im not going to be able to have that. Nobody else got me those perfect grades busting their asses like I did, even if theyre just useless fucking numbers I know I can do the same on my bio and organic chem classes, because being a fuckup is not an option, and Once I get my degree, then what? Likely a life of underemployment and more of this feeling that keeps me awake, maybe by then Ill have the shit I was never taught figured out. Fuckit man idk anymore I have work at 6am with an hour commute so I gotta be up in 5 hours. And just in case I ever get looked up and this comes up im not suicidal or any of that shit, but it would be dope to not have to worry about any of this overrated shit.",7.323406567446256,5.033804564926374,7.795664619261363,78.30352763997169,64.93038821954485,10.608851090637057,34.688125049216474,8.841846274778883,2.697786235136624,2818,95,601,34,34,938,301,747,0.17600000000000002,0.72,0.10400000000000001,-0.9964,10,0,2,0,2,1,57.0,0,1,6,7,40,40,15,1,24,0,62,24,12,12,11,129,122,54,2,15,24,5,9,4,3,6,6,0,1,3,35,34,2,6,22,2,3,7,14,26,2,1,11,13,99,14,99,87,23,70,0,4,3,5,39,33,11,9,33,420,134,14,0.0905691051883548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09994525971881964,0.0,0.0376803754282282,0.0,0.0,0.061590097275034075,0.0,0.0692851175705492,0.0,0.08982021570230403,0.0,0.0,0.03726532829106495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16563025767233727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015152027825192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046170619426985283,0.0,0.0,0.03900863229156669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036156030408869264,0.0,0.0,0.029204790125679607,0.0466863852865652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046341819764685925,0.1592194751358801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037829432905563565,0.0,0.0,0.046791048153729406,0.05050424657337843,0.11964007959866788,0.04096247041099721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20607507396160826,0.03235129342156179,0.0,0.0,0.08277852134447165,0.0,0.05475826074887847,0.0,0.0,0.16745935667103226,0.2129337871152837,0.0868821384429558,0.07720876446658523,0.0,0.1448727741286852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04470912039686903,0.04647501555536573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03035328104647646,0.0,0.04542409852869072,0.0,0.13378848728038478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5380659643694707,0.0,0.13481379278587993,0.08050198209042413,0.0,0.0,0.09954882324959012,0.03691295441297605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04630652314985355,0.12794327488236867,0.0884949799456399,0.13616105513457946,0.0399870895921222,0.0,0.07605523794620098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068337149078158,0.0,0.13648325921524718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048039754043915986,0.09144897789057004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03328935666412315,0.10073376585030036,0.06985247732948753,0.0,0.04816063542595586,0.0,0.0,0.04345174954525058,0.0,0.0,0.09645314116976768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084940977103856,0.0,0.04322922950507425,0.0,0.039540724618615936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04333120102021274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029010443969070526,0.04656006219839851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036085925406770414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789036548884976,0.07491969972711582,0.0,0.1359517696694516,0.0,0.03836945445911892,0.06972452198013204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048267307763946624,0.0,0.11357974103031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04953395055772728,0.0,0.042680154899345735,0.0,0.0,0.036398008026834884,0.03958069496476247,0.0,0.05178683247933395,0.052578855868426234,0.09025513363817897,0.0580330255845142,0.0,0.0359508764261664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030745238655344717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026001441407922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143250247660021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593538724995902,0.09197732264776012,0.0,0.03216884688561635,0.049511549373570975,0.0,0.029161767158272893
mentalhealth,abcdAFK,2020/01/07,"I'm not sure what this is, but the thought of people knowing my fetish and my association with the furry fandom makes my mind want to break apart I know that my hatred of my sexual fetish is irrational, but it still fucks with me. If somebody knew it and my association, it's just the idea of them leaving me, hating me, their face looking down upon me, the fact that somebody registered that I am a failure. I don't know what would happen to my mind if this happened. I don't even know how to fix this if I can't even get help from a psychologist without this happening. I don't know what to do and I've been loosing the ability to think straight after I discovered my sexual fetish.  


Also, I think I may have Childhood Emotional Neglect",6.53341836734694,6.028409918367347,7.1490391156462625,76.5353954081633,65.4625850340136,10.343197278911568,33.340986394557824,9.827888789773867,3.005939455782313,586,22,116,11,8,194,83,147,0.19399999999999998,0.75,0.055,-0.9768,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,6,4,2,0,7,0,12,2,1,2,2,33,31,10,0,5,8,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,13,5,0,1,10,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,3,1,23,1,15,26,0,8,0,1,1,1,3,4,1,4,3,85,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619836159145654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915779594939359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22497880193852088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745060335810648,0.08898093622532527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4518187411499317,0.0,0.0,0.16814773738623753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415647377779785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922613999966665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4679948196334142,0.0,0.0,0.18033570662486306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301909837977025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368451298360732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.343932928719847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180728243254092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601130003884251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051694629451266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21825797195502547,0.0,0.1352086212936419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045436881039732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417459001993534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098468433567085,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,showmeyourkittis,2020/01/07,"Change from Wellbutrin XL to SR I started taking the generic Wellbutrin XL 150mg once a day for about a month with my generic brand of Prozac 20mg. Life changer but the only thing that continues is my trouble getting to sleep and staying a sleep no matter how tired I am. Basically my sleep hygiene didn’t get better and was baseline. 

My psychiatrist thought maybe the XL wouldn’t help the sleeping and make it worse plus she doesn’t like prescribing me another med to help me sleep so she changes me to Wellbutrin SR generic 150mg only once a day to see if that helps me sleep. 

I thought this was weird it’s the same mg once day? Wouldn’t that take away the good effects I’m feeling from the XL 150mg I was doing so well on? 

Also, though I’m only on day 3 of the SR - my sleeping is even worse on the SR because I feel like I’m panicking and overthinking when I’m in bed trying to sleep.

Thoughts: should I increase to SR 300mg once a day or go back on 150mg XL once a day and get another medication to help me sleep? I really don’t want to take the SR 150mg twice a day because I hate having to take another medication mid day. I prefer all in the AM or AM then one for sleeping 

Thanks friends! #endthestigma",3.163126566416043,4.391174138888889,4.2858061821219735,87.9586090225564,73.48412698412699,7.368755221386801,28.34252297410192,7.85451343220497,1.6105365079365086,961,38,207,13,19,314,120,252,0.10800000000000001,0.715,0.177,0.9514,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,10,10,1,0,18,0,16,15,10,3,1,27,39,17,0,6,4,0,2,2,1,3,5,0,1,0,7,7,0,0,7,0,0,2,6,3,1,2,7,3,21,7,26,29,3,25,0,0,1,0,7,8,0,3,16,112,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052807114057618766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077262289970518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204082077749185,0.05077582776852505,0.0,0.0805070429781393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058401428234604175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970976600572174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34069011208813355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043614626180859775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06677723047830646,0.04717447777640682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05101746124710161,0.0,0.10349962495802596,0.0,0.03752846494688845,0.0553859220524652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519459296669368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17704394856913985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04664154458161718,0.06452144602643246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044077997514522016,0.0,0.0663397121386811,0.0,0.0733485378346969,0.13304398113447194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05270745738929075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.351618597229348,0.044746133938513184,0.15066477916121868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042302869516508655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05262029755534217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6608137376315045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04673898213459565,0.07038312217587266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985964525828593,0.0,0.0,0.060794945266147773,0.0,0.0,0.04386984615565286,0.0,0.06487776026627114,0.15727010962827778,0.0,0.07589600698938505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04483253756742269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038948378301854006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059372213164732825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458793291314589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dazzler56,2020/01/07,"I told my crush about my trauma A little backstory: I have a history of csa which I had repressed until it resurfaced a couple years back. Since then I have been extremely touch averse, have only been able to have sex a couple times when blacked out, and have not really been dating because I did not want to tell anyone the reason I am the way that I am.

So, last night I went on a first date with a guy I’ve been talking to/hanging out with for a couple of weeks. I don’t know what it is about him but this time I wanted to be honest about my issues. He came with me to a party as my +1,  I sat him down after a little liquid courage and told him. Not really any details, which I kind of wish I had now just to get it all off my chest, but I told him there are certain things in relationships that are really hard for me to do and that it will take a while for me to be ready. As soon as I was done he kissed me, gave me a hug, was totally understanding and we had a really great night.

I still don’t know how far I will be able to go with him but I am just so happy that I was finally able to tell someone and that he reacted the way that he did. I’m hungover as hell and feel like shit today but have been grinning like an idiot all day long.

Just wanted to yell this into the void. Longtime lurker of this sub and have been so inspired by the victories others have posted about on here. Kind of ecstatic that now I have one of my own.",5.909685124864278,4.108722596091205,6.767244299674267,82.99814115092293,67.33876221498372,10.010770901194356,28.284256243213896,8.648137234880735,1.7166032138979364,1115,24,256,14,15,374,154,307,0.07200000000000001,0.7440000000000001,0.184,0.9919,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,0,1,19,18,3,1,18,0,38,5,2,3,4,43,57,23,0,4,10,0,3,2,0,2,0,1,0,1,19,16,0,1,6,0,0,3,5,5,0,2,22,5,37,13,42,30,4,41,1,0,1,3,19,11,2,0,26,191,56,0,0.32037740511880136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262254056337628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467177693492302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211681627311404,0.0,0.06509969750828544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12214213398044513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3544915050883187,0.0,0.06887230738006284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928577269858564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05399748076400263,0.07629256074376803,0.0,0.116985929127934,0.0,0.09083761904305973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055794657028272215,0.0,0.060692620809737675,0.0,0.0,0.1177390733916918,0.0,0.10574133357716438,0.0,0.11368256838086835,0.09566507548364477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146359142700832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224158442852349,0.1173806955068774,0.08705011512482402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434681150215556,0.21406821739553505,0.0,0.09450797394704832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004349944955832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236534038030466,0.08122048445054485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022776645364341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27365595926855457,0.10980044374786704,0.0,0.11465514506692827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962093413580944,0.08833983340100887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048491189772816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528460319208002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029464572977353,0.0858357408513591,0.18668264885304944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07094817071454254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12454309422107795,0.0,0.10122677310196866,0.3061343400630874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111747258149028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18896689423141194,0.16953378122838778,0.08566247650637658,0.0,0.0,0.09899768808966708,0.0,0.0,0.12280606825985013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877084830355908
mentalhealth,Def-n-Blind,2020/01/07,"Do I have Social Anxiety? How do I fix it? Not sure if this is the right place, but I'll try my luck.

I'm fine with meeting new people (albeit it can get awkward), preparing for a speech or speaking in front of a huge crowd. But I constantly feel like people are always looking at my actions. 

For example, if I needed to buy items from a supermarket I would anxiously walk around looking for the items I needed. If I had to look for the items on the shelve, I would scan through it quickly rather than slowly looking at the brands/information of the items. I always feel like I need to get out as soon as possible.

Another example, if I needed to buy lunch for myself I would try not to buy from the same store the previous day as I feel like the store owner would judge me for buying the same food again. Sure, they will benefit from my business but I can't shake that feeling.

One last example, I would never be able to go window shopping alone as I would always walk quickly everywhere I go. I tried to slow my footsteps, but I would naturally go back to walking at a fast speed.

Is this social anxiety? How do I stop it?",4.0016500000000015,5.065829551111111,5.155708333333333,83.14556250000003,71.26666666666667,8.469444444444445,27.840277777777786,8.841846274778883,2.0522944444444446,879,31,178,16,16,291,119,225,0.063,0.809,0.128,0.9552,0,1,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,0,9,10,0,2,14,0,19,2,0,2,3,39,37,15,0,16,12,0,4,3,0,8,0,2,1,0,7,3,2,1,4,1,7,9,4,2,0,1,1,11,27,8,33,27,6,33,0,0,5,0,7,10,0,6,17,127,34,0,0.10137268146097753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499152559245292,0.0,0.0,0.25305057531518765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10629809535875802,0.15509964769683393,0.11452227546432045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902431787568122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794933468130043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954785535445008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06537699318963536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20502829461976685,0.2172619916728256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258024881020775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592608412046108,0.0,0.17283729302590364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263226542225661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857671488972188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34051008425996504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3006662352589284,0.07818486137028516,0.09790636744817337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869275250357536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405581066281706,0.0,0.10591287605131952,0.0,0.0,0.11428246682197407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865717160767536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20667336517332827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475210086957531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19108510516113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20647618930328587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5040857106989041,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,morelikethrowMEaway,2020/01/07,Why do i crave the feeling of being emotionally hurt? Sometimes i have thoughts of my partner cheating on me and it builds up all this adrenaline in me... it feels horrible... but somehow good? Can anyone else relate?,2.350769230769231,5.277426512820514,3.283461538461541,83.09903846153848,91.56410256410255,5.676923076923077,29.57692307692308,7.1686216300943375,2.3456461538461544,170,9,28,3,6,54,35,39,0.10400000000000001,0.765,0.131,0.2824,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,7,7,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,5,1,5,5,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357516921560892,0.3454625801700281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816558051721205,0.3792621625869945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409587392937971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827957077939596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3609391735294232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334620971361348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676691736757732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30423649812634723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hellbelleizzy,2020/01/07,"My friend was diagnosed with schizophrenia and can talk to god I have a very small group of friends and one of my girlfriends was acting extremely strange for over 6 months, extremely paranoid, stalking a guy who is also my cousin, going on I’m real able rants, spouting utter nonsense, she has a mental break saying she knows her purpose and That god is whispering to her, 

she was hospitalized at the same time I was (just for suicidal actions) but she didn’t know I’m we were in the same hospital, I would hide from her because the thought of her seeing me like this made me want to die even more,

Anyway we got out of the hospital crossing paths only once, and I kind of ghosted her

I pushed the hospital and her out of my mind because I was too hard to recall and accept

I found out she was diagnosed with schizophrenia, and visited her for the first time last week.

It was so hard all the hospital memeories came back, memories I didn’t even know I had 

I don’t know how to accept this whole situation, and come to peace with her and myself",4.4730894308943085,5.840499073170732,4.878536585365853,84.42772357723578,70.46341463414635,8.198373983739838,28.788617886178866,8.648137234880735,2.0927983739837392,830,31,163,14,15,263,119,205,0.095,0.794,0.111,0.6659,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,2,0,0,1,10,6,0,0,10,0,18,2,0,2,1,38,33,13,3,2,2,1,2,1,3,1,2,2,0,1,5,19,0,0,8,0,0,8,3,0,0,2,16,5,32,6,26,16,5,24,0,0,1,0,25,8,0,0,8,117,37,0,0.14773402080798795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814284306531635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359834292445882,0.0,0.1801145757338871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16896836301212856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725977766189625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998938426868004,0.1533245894048242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951538548618844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566248262931504,0.0,0.16198272848115286,0.2282778760123357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396064855702508,0.0,0.11815639219978748,0.0,0.0,0.14627990730957244,0.0,0.0,0.2646813294500172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384224874789462,0.32476301703059385,0.120422944755605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721753802331517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13978950254770325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888114556192494,0.0,0.14916924678076435,0.0,0.11791988594416325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733191064365756,0.10010839588600254,0.11235837997441374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16815365877272992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174840229559228,0.0,0.0,0.1177248873958133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660592292010059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16159704056208435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874300986021287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728431047128353,0.1722897911573244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189603912488155,0.08713735312904552,0.0,0.1185033203134038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16493975834607855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049460096858654,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sammi_ali,2020/01/07,"What am I still doing here? Everyday I think about why I live in this boring state with family who emotionally neglects me and controls me. I feel stuck and I wanna be free. I wanna runaway to a different country and never comeback or go backpacking somewhere and be spontaneous and adventurous because it’s what my heart truly desires. I wanna meet new people and experience different cultures, be happy and have no worries. But it seems like a dream.",5.392386759581882,7.845960085365863,6.534668989547041,69.0767073170732,70.09756097560975,9.075958188153312,33.66550522648084,9.606745405546679,3.9010675958188163,365,18,54,9,7,122,61,82,0.142,0.6729999999999999,0.185,0.6092,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,2,0,6,1,1,1,1,20,11,9,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,2,3,1,1,1,2,2,0,0,1,1,10,5,7,7,0,7,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,2,5,44,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995224536220854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574979225131136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4797327278398879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582510432656921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22457715738918912,0.21643131617367103,0.0,0.11608454364727305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047784988799413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24439638450578685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27205808686002897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216312152798527,0.0,0.20272683454933607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17706929610133593,0.22173361011388307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15916460402810018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20900460605255228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833460395117424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471081253483746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071638059138258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331536461005259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eatmycheetodoodle,2020/01/07,"I'm feeling empty and scared In going through some shit rn, I want to ask my friends for help but I'm afraid I'll be judged and made fun of, I dont wanna seem like I'm faking it for attention. I lost something that was dear to me and now I feel like I cant cope.",-0.5951912568305993,0.95273573770492,1.7225409836065602,100.82075136612025,85.0655737704918,4.722404371584699,18.36338797814207,5.46131890053228,-0.6895595628415299,204,5,54,1,6,69,45,61,0.256,0.5379999999999999,0.20600000000000002,-0.5393,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,10,1,2,0,0,4,1,1,1,0,12,15,4,0,2,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,3,2,7,5,8,11,1,3,0,1,0,0,3,1,1,2,3,27,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696839851811317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3380890489813957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917219589081553,0.2060856817335868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228740788877177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16394626178273314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933578523678166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818673744268623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.314903140094846,0.0,0.0,0.2729608069141842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888125163013849,0.0,0.0,0.2626156384942214,0.0,0.0,0.2961141259830668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220811616182096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014927293523924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon_throwaway_369,2020/01/07,"My husband discovered a helpful, but hard-to-explain coping mechanism of mine in a very troubling way, and I'm not sure how to talk to him about it. I fucked up, and my communication skills when I'm stressed are subpar, at best. 

I have a coping technique I've been using for about a year whenever I feel suicidal. A few things to understand first before I explain it:

1.) I have a very vivid imagination... which is, in and of itself, a coping technique I've developed alongside mental escapism. I can entertain anytime, anywhere, by retreating into my own head. It can be an issue sometimes, actually, but that's not the issue I came here for this time.

2.) I tried to kill myself via Tylenol about a year ago, and about a minute after swallowing I freaked the hell out and realized I did not, in fact, want to die. I made myself vomit immediately and sat on the toilet for an hour with '911' typed out on my phone, ready to call if anything happened. Nothing did (thank God.) 

That feeling of 'This was the dumbest thing I've ever done UNDO UNDO UNDO' is very important... but it's hard, sometimes, to latch onto it when I'm at a low point in a depressed feedback loop.

So, my coping mechanism is this; I close my eyes, and go into my head. I go through with the suicide I'm thinking about step-by step. I mentally construct every part of the scene; the room I'm in right now, getting up, the sound of my footsteps, sounds of the city outside, how the orange tree next door smells, how the cold iron handrails feel on my fingers. I put myself right there as much as I can, with as much detail and belief as I can muster.

I had been thinking about hanging myself. I had looked up a noose gif; so, I could imagine doing it like I'd have to. 

Whenever I do this, at the point where I commit the act is when the feeling of 'Oh *fuck* oh *God* oh *no*, *no no no* ***I don't want to do this at all****'* kicks in. 

I don't want to die; *I know this.* I just have to remind myself sometimes, because my brain kind of sucks eggs and I'm not getting the help I need yet. This method has done more than anything else to snap me out of that low and into a more manageable state of mind.

So, what's the issue here? Remember that noose gif I looked up?

I thought I closed it.

I didn't.

Husband saw it.

He asked why I had it up, and instead of explaining the above, my brain froze up in a panic and an idiotic 'uh, I had it up already' falls out of my mouth.

We didn't get to talk about it after that point at all because he was in the middle of heading out the door for work. All he was able to ask was a quick 'should I be worried about you?' and get my hasty, embarrassed reassurances that he doesn't.

*Of course* he's worried about me. Like, what sane, caring person wouldn't be if they saw that on their clinically-depressed spouse's computer? I couldn't even use the excuse *'I needed to look it up for a picture / writing thing'* because we'd just had a shitty bad-communication discussion on an emotional topic that I'm not dealing with well. I obviously didn't look it up for that reason.

I just, don't know how to explain any of this to him without sounding like an idiot. How do I do that? Fantasizing about yourself dying is supposed to be the exact opposite of healthy, but I'm doing it in a way that reminds me that I'm being irrational and I want to live.

...To be fair, I haven't actually asked a therapist if this is healthy or not, but I am in the middle of settling into California and I intend to get psychiatric help as soon as we get me my I.D. and medical coverage.

Please help me. I fuck up communication regularly and I don't wanna fuck this up, I need him to know I'm ok. He's got enough to worry about already, and I'm getting help soon. I'm not going to off myself in two, three weeks.",1.5504849086304802,3.6475844863459055,3.4245847306823616,88.53203280062971,80.59947984395319,6.180008212990212,23.77251728150024,7.325047716171175,1.004251235370611,2926,105,615,41,76,982,312,769,0.17600000000000002,0.755,0.07,-0.9983,0,0,1,0,0,5,133.0,3,1,2,4,38,29,9,3,46,1,58,17,8,10,9,111,124,44,6,18,20,3,7,3,0,2,3,3,3,1,43,36,2,0,20,1,0,9,23,17,2,3,25,20,81,12,118,88,12,87,2,3,8,4,39,56,6,4,22,425,124,5,0.06376873405894615,0.0,0.1244581713821088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0565271351580116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074076748814318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04336492588315054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495246936447776,0.0,0.17884547459633585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053244229317418935,0.1166184852070289,0.0,0.05426249589497021,0.0,0.06692135217661799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237399359268593,0.06511500724607361,0.07293444357884357,0.06501647433643414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091414523695231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574276473905731,0.10984783440745792,0.0,0.1985456345054278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051510994775026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05327059468101717,0.07173124277936115,0.0,0.06589014873999584,0.0,0.04211864742867947,0.05768247078524065,0.0537279087676099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289735519051061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542416526142667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23581266832721906,0.2332157211185343,0.0,0.10872372335025653,0.0,0.05100168201165881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05639048092884775,0.0,0.1142485205219152,0.0,0.19633535527410045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21371419126243973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279935781477737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19967397216090746,0.0,0.0,0.07055065611224301,0.06640532352521128,0.10513688562698263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934625471340785,0.0,0.056308960471416,0.0,0.21419870417378287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603395180300601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424029075330989,0.1285277707301974,0.0,0.06438824297687795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375471371581237,0.14185112488203974,0.0,0.0,0.06781877211220412,0.0,0.0,0.061187820181827085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481886967686861,0.0,0.06905532476806912,0.0,0.0,0.055680398905536485,0.0,0.06999892060528379,0.18084619668628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410519077177236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06556487928025646,0.0,0.0,0.0722375447170088,0.10891630091979336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18920672563981655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304686941246033,0.0,0.0,0.13950528995226685,0.0,0.060101277178588076,0.0,0.0,0.10250978583973278,0.0,0.058709682721858586,0.0,0.07404041521718469,0.12709534012637466,0.08172085983269119,0.0,0.050625251806087436,0.037184061644346525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04329478453638507,0.0,0.06229278721612848,0.06638550108055744,0.0,0.11015142361892967,0.0,0.15784765200216852,0.15044980615558085,0.10123330581148568,0.05115143199134376,0.0,0.05733575023608025,0.0,0.057541363896109414,0.0,0.0,0.06147078404024251,0.0,0.046424397876869895,0.19428073453461844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821299479877789
mentalhealth,WackoDesperado2055,2020/01/07,"My friend tried to kill themself last night and I didn't realise what was going on so I didn't help and now I am so distraught. They are alive.  

They had just told me they started taking their pills again so when they put up a photo about ""chugging"" their pills I thought it was a joke and didn't even realise it was a joke about suicide. They kept telling me how tired they were (they did seem quite loopy) so I just told them to get some rest. When I woke up it hit me what they had meant and done.   

I was so relieved when they responded and said they were still breathing. I spent a few hours just texting them and telling them I'm here and sorry and all. I'm so frazzled and distraught because I didn't help as much as I could. I didn't even realise what was happening.   

I'm supposed to be working right now but I just can't focus and haven't eaten etc. because I'm just so shaken at them and myself.   

I don't know what to do. I haven't known them for too long so I don't know all the history and don't know if I can push them to get some extra help. I'm also so so worried they will do something like this again and won't make it.     

I've dealt with similar, myself and others, but this just feels so different and I'm lost.",1.5056903418519774,3.1238893931297724,2.499173581148358,97.43389478924662,78.73282442748092,5.319880517756388,21.696647859276467,5.7926816847441245,-0.08518307334882147,959,27,226,5,23,303,122,262,0.12300000000000001,0.826,0.051,-0.9517,1,0,1,0,1,1,21.0,0,0,19,3,34,9,1,2,5,0,31,5,1,2,2,41,60,36,2,2,9,0,1,1,1,2,3,1,0,0,11,16,1,1,8,2,1,3,12,4,0,0,26,2,41,5,15,29,9,21,0,1,0,0,29,5,0,4,14,161,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964735230092464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18240827407081886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11945569360607305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631621106557372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15310846241572534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668606795671664,0.19763907334305755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565002332829865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559245886208515,0.0,0.15633570477965902,0.0,0.08502985908137202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230437201264433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30085207360629984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473409955301696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16552723258005148,0.0,0.24667407333862906,0.12195649031675075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309450934268466,0.0,0.0,0.13240488875863768,0.0,0.0,0.16332284332308195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986941705590924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10998450728809266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14040388361512804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15040476456499355,0.0,0.1591343558201779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777070312022878,0.14231847245768803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13620420795761018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518121652599082,0.0,0.16748215047831624,0.10589852449696162,0.0,0.1194830227214345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365492433789808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249213364495078,0.0,0.26154084488579626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877788658404426,0.0,0.17196085127061134,0.0,0.2859277832927451,0.0,0.10157901094577908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892176668814793,0.15194166434574266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TouretteTV96,2020/01/07,Stressed/burnt out call in? At what point of consistant and extreme stress do you call in sick @ work?,3.1515789473684217,5.842012842105267,1.778157894736843,99.2346052631579,78.47368421052632,5.905263157894738,25.28947368421053,7.1686216300943375,0.8539263157894736,80,3,17,1,2,22,17,19,0.28800000000000003,0.7120000000000001,0.0,-0.755,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,9,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7770965913776968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3597096095872299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43587857570773375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770194066825736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,creeperreaper900,2020/01/07,"I need advice I am a 15 year old male. My family normally takes a trip for high performance sports in December, it lasts about 3 weeks. I just started high school, and am taking very academically advanced courses despite this. It is now right before the end of the semester and i am overwhelmed in almost every way.I am doing poorly in school, I have ZERO time for myself, I am so stressed I sometimes cry myself to sleep. This is from the fact that I have 3 weeks worth of make-up in the most work filled time of the year. Not to mention keeping up with sports. No one cares and I need help. I have very extreme adhd, and I always push things to do away for later, and end up on my phone, feeling guilty. I cant do this, I barely even have time for hygiene! I have little interest in the things I used to love, and everything just seems grim and pointless. I have various other problems as well. How do I keep doing this? Thanks Reddit.",3.723663594470043,5.080643102150539,4.626912442396313,85.55322580645165,72.27956989247312,7.249769585253457,25.1136712749616,7.7094869923839395,1.2499735791090631,731,22,146,9,14,237,111,186,0.095,0.772,0.134,0.6567,0,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,3,9,9,0,2,8,0,19,2,1,2,1,24,32,10,0,4,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,10,8,0,2,2,2,2,4,3,4,1,2,0,1,21,5,24,32,2,31,0,2,0,1,5,13,0,3,14,102,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15797566434548665,0.12845004366330426,0.0,0.0,0.13162677808996706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937575942877056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350028006249973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185307092050334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402060106174268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439010696178572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328488746185595,0.0,0.0,0.08682055589618481,0.0,0.11075110885842716,0.0,0.1181375194537642,0.0,0.1239180347708447,0.0,0.0664643581638504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810722101049351,0.27776531087699746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23367509815375134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714814743205144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13174602288074572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863748719744566,0.0,0.08774295648281573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19493493212813665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879171187340638,0.0,0.0,0.13793318622621242,0.0,0.08907296847248307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257785508951162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225638012266388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660659874617613,0.0,0.11966586212184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315435235122583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000601952030946,0.0,0.09303999062425188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057391906054998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976659657789397,0.0,0.0,0.12102020367656925,0.0,0.0,0.1746572085483276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299461948230981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352937968325748,0.0,0.21691771112295455,0.0,0.10433777462398944,0.2108802647518253,0.0,0.11818807136792638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569614118403508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16929716824591942
mentalhealth,A_Wild_Nabob,2020/01/07,"Need to get this out somewhere Hi, not sure why I feel the need to do this but here goes.

2019 wasnt a good year for me. In the year it seemed me and my S/O got more and more distant with eachother. It was the year my depression spiraled down into deepest depths of my being. It was the year I tried to kill myself. It was the year i realized i hated my job and my life. It was the year I got more.. pessimistic.. It had me thinking that maybe were all just doing everything for ourselves. That maybe nobody cared at all. That everything we did was for some self gratification or reward. Maybe it's true, maybe it's not who knows. But recently I've had time to reflect, if it is true, is it a bad thing? Because all anyone in this world can do for you is suggest something. Theres nobody more valuable in your corner than yourself, because it's you making all the decisions here. No matter what you think, you always have a choice, so you need to do what's best for you. People are the advisors and you? Well you're the king of your own life. 

To anyone reading this who had a bad year, decade or even life. I wish you the best in 2020, and let's start believing in ourselves again.",2.268634657182375,4.042557780082987,3.231772377000592,92.33272475795296,77.00829875518674,6.084252124086149,22.264572218929068,6.868970318607317,0.4519933214779686,919,26,200,9,21,293,125,241,0.12300000000000001,0.722,0.155,0.8466,1,0,1,0,0,1,32.0,1,10,0,4,8,15,2,0,14,0,23,3,0,1,7,39,39,11,1,5,8,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,23,9,0,0,8,1,0,0,4,5,1,0,13,1,26,10,24,24,12,23,0,1,0,0,16,12,0,5,11,143,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030199355569213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15176724665804964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18122868687141008,0.13231239773113834,0.0,0.0,0.12227118832854525,0.22778184479533714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106490827274113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934729408263728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168013570817419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19507162420840948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487380452433669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0567001471171017,0.0,0.0,0.09102612487334176,0.1735956737039725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714656252958073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769491288250137,0.0,0.12006749772745162,0.0,0.05964283193438395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097477951167027,0.2299645236934096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244168115722734,0.0,0.4361142107900219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241411073304748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523798685180595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855496923117447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715593802806576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879763090650844,0.11321587004488255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354830947101922,0.0,0.0,0.07681497872702166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228409427654918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209958679673205,0.13907764566549954,0.0,0.0,0.06328215048598583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368175904222153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757754839614677,0.0,0.0979274745204199,0.0,0.1247990848600071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4892085007248414
mentalhealth,throwaway47kc47,2020/01/07,"I feel so alone Hey. I made this account because I just want to vent about my situation a little bit. I'm 17 m going into my last semester of high school and I am breaking down emotionally. My parents are divorced and I see my dad twice a year as he lives in a state across the country from me. I got back from visiting him just a few days ago and back to my regular situation. But it's changed now. 

I lived with my mom, and we didn't have a good relationship in the first place. She moved to a different state for a job and will fly back on the weekends, leaving me to live all alone in this city with her boyfriend of 7 months living with me. She has been through so many boyfriends since the divorce when I was 4 that it's become really hard for me to form a genuine relationship with them as I feel like they're just going to leave and it will be all for naught. Tonight he invited me to dinner with his parents and I declined and I feel bad about it but I just didn't want to go and be fake with his family who I feel like won't even be in my life even 6 months from now.

I'm just having a really hard time keeping everything together. I've been holding in so many emotions because I've never been allowed to express them to either of my parents because they haven't been emotionally (and physically) available to me. I just can't stop crying as I write this. Anyways. Thanks for reading and for any and all replies.",3.5824362099788734,4.594622423208193,4.671906387128235,86.41804323094429,72.20819112627989,7.901771493580368,28.62814887046969,8.269060116576782,1.7831623273200066,1122,43,242,17,21,368,153,293,0.059000000000000004,0.878,0.063,0.4991,6,2,0,0,2,0,19.0,1,0,3,1,20,6,0,0,13,0,20,2,0,2,4,45,36,21,0,2,9,5,6,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,9,20,1,3,4,2,1,5,6,2,0,2,9,7,39,4,43,21,7,38,0,0,1,0,26,12,0,0,20,165,48,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285996996110181,0.0,0.0,0.19362387121982905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635662225937872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21562957374183134,0.07804774166443958,0.17094452344263322,0.10323582147530147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020505177996142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888418241293886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267792603426627,0.06028365831746485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766150628521073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154404661773119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347874524286725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400932542806169,0.0,0.08811993478112644,0.0,0.1890551255916436,0.1335571534916549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950980876167148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15937203301881067,0.07840241632242778,0.07476051683211411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16747052459113546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876149635605408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927595391693343,0.08308489739754417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619462155844624,0.0,0.19795311011220426,0.0,0.0,0.0660241747486853,0.09133435150357408,0.09368653211288308,0.33016063949889524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844832906288774,0.0,0.18953800832154225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094768198791476,0.14922174676869407,0.09934915877153004,0.0,0.0,0.07209370205774243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.311378860690132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766150628521073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935003209614104,0.0,0.11976498953379898,0.0,0.0,0.20071439022398446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946017159889736,0.07448749290543477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732350686583501,0.21013968975657374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814930667871069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605924452319512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054506038954030216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026798354328217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06019485158898681
mentalhealth,andiezilla,2020/01/07,"I get triggered, but I’ll be okay I’ve been diagnosed with clinical depression, anxiety and PTSD for almost 3 years now. I’m on medication, seeing a therapist regularly and overall I think I’m okay. 

But the other day I bought a new conditioner, didn’t give it much thought since I read the label and it seemed okay. However, last night when I was in the shower, as soon as I got a whiff of the scent, I said, “Oh, shit.” 

I shut down. I was like a zombie throughout the night, I knew that smell and it reminded me of people and a past I’d rather move on from. I hate the fact that just a smell affects me. I could barely sleep all night and I’m feeling drained today. 

I think I’ll be okay though. I knew the trigger and didn’t let it affect me so bad. But I have the scent in my hair and I have this urge to shower again, to get rid of the smell, get rid of any particle that reminds me of that time. I feel unclean, dirty and terrible. But I think I’ll be okay.",0.5959934318555007,2.6013472857142865,2.653891625615767,93.25288998357964,83.53201970443352,6.2311986863710995,20.504105090311988,7.447530270364453,0.5200844006568146,741,22,172,12,21,249,111,203,0.16899999999999998,0.7490000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.9744,3,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,0,8,11,2,0,15,5,12,6,3,4,2,33,33,18,0,2,6,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,2,0,10,10,0,0,9,1,1,1,2,5,0,0,11,11,23,6,17,17,2,21,0,1,1,0,2,6,1,2,15,100,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407636999303695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463537658307996,0.0,0.11770844160585675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847318131053695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228509135384941,0.0,0.0,0.0992319982605064,0.0,0.1325261059021682,0.1561725724834543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560036017600745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411687158361911,0.14760400902966325,0.0,0.0,0.1230621313187565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519125916796034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542278894439934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573402446955416,0.0,0.07517203220977554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155005615203666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16353711479290053,0.11311053318212386,0.0,0.0,0.14860647469865426,0.0,0.4331835054263324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688422031420906,0.10667255491522012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798632177077976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390943326860873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14636350790014674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261271085268848,0.14007546120454448,0.0,0.0,0.1579430798717318,0.12728102960174614,0.0,0.15397891593919766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786523687252033,0.0,0.2957768093387606,0.15117432682572782,0.12215384160039425,0.0897215483206076,0.0,0.1458486778574089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908581487728428
mentalhealth,cthoniccuttlefish,2020/01/07,"How do you bring your mental illness up to someone important? There are times in our lives when we need or want to tell the important people in our lives (could be friends, partners, family, etc.) about our struggles and experiences or let them know about our specific illnesses. 

I'm typically very open about my struggles with mental health and the fact that I have suffered the symptoms of Panic Disorder, GAD, and clinical depression for a long time. I actually enjoy having discussions about the importance of mental health and using my experiences as a way to start that. Sometimes it's just nice to share, right?

But there are some people that are hard to tell this to. Usually, it's people you know well, or people you are worried might react badly because you know you have something to lose if you tell them and somehow things go wrong. You might lose someone, or get hurt. 

There's a specific person I'm wanting to tell about my issues. For very minimal background on my relationship with them, we met and connected really well, some stuff happened, and we're starting over. 

I don't think they'll react badly. At all. They have some problems too and I've always been understanding and supportive of them. The problem is, it's really important to me that they are aware of these very crucial parts of my life and identity, and I truly have no clue how to bring it up. I have no idea what to say or how. I have no idea how to tell them that crowded places make me panic, or that everyday situations can turn into nightmares if my anxiety spirals, or that I can feel so tired for no reason. I need to tell them just how much this has affected me and how I'm concerned it might affect our relationship, but I feel something blocking me from doing that that I've simply never experienced before. 

I've had to go into conversations about my mental health knowing I might not get a positive reaction or that things might not end that well, that I might get hurt. Even then I've known what to say and how to handle things, but now I'm just so lost.

Advice or tips would be great, but it would also be cool to see people sharing their experiences with telling people about their mental health. Thanks :)",6.4516346153846165,7.169746663461537,6.5346153846153845,76.71038461538461,65.53846153846155,9.765384615384617,30.903846153846153,9.757249324022393,2.8615701923076933,1756,62,318,35,26,560,193,416,0.14400000000000002,0.757,0.099,-0.9194,0,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,7,8,11,3,31,28,0,4,9,1,35,10,0,14,3,89,69,41,0,11,20,0,3,0,2,9,10,2,0,2,27,21,0,1,12,0,0,4,8,16,3,0,4,8,48,12,46,51,7,29,0,7,1,0,46,12,0,21,12,231,75,0,0.0,0.0,0.059058833057268015,0.0,0.0,0.059139486799023075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839785751373714,0.05035752496765252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04629766819324035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010634180335507,0.036892457242189966,0.0,0.0514981001366764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483203307651187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05212582542334437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936121391021025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05360279589615144,0.0,0.0674958470792225,0.03997291844263578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776006484592741,0.057052911563819524,0.0,0.06120150558359817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046757636053652026,0.0,0.09485767572865636,0.0,0.06878987165354243,0.0,0.0,0.06672356242953696,0.0,0.0,0.053517675251247065,0.0,0.054214072291227655,0.0,0.0,0.25731990793064885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957591812929478,0.1366395268445575,0.0,0.06316720258582566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330409343144749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188584559422949,0.042747097037317584,0.0,0.0,0.10688061568571998,0.05355833469800268,0.0,0.13541289815438987,0.06606477743033055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04039759947629474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049498506398885,0.3852132182144989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044489196042214095,0.08974969191508206,0.0466767890605576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14201446428819625,0.0,0.06553731027706695,0.0,0.25174187095232115,0.052843768263766834,0.06323056519638866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581901785506375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754138008936752,0.06222468507823881,0.0,0.12995175703974307,0.0,0.05168378710537545,0.0,0.09625593655330998,0.0,0.0,0.04822663970303587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802706541663317,0.0,0.0,0.10255687417980393,0.09318257359616858,0.05985587124725385,0.0,0.08567279761658951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265373811008428,0.06928097136150227,0.0,0.06867742900900455,0.0,0.06290349867681744,0.0,0.0,0.3702803033651068,0.05571872561215945,0.0,0.0,0.1206204846419474,0.038778800656949934,0.0,0.0,0.07057944897173098,0.06955888799615062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582842936533992,0.0,0.06300350040822357,0.0,0.0522698868727389,0.06665427852332374,0.14980612401023774,0.07139258022650075,0.04803799414182418,0.0,0.0,0.16324436381166302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146104263895606,0.0,0.08598340604692797,0.06616916778113957,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,freds__,2020/01/07,"I don’t want to go to therapy anymore. How do I talk about this with my therapist? My therapy contract ends in May. I’ve been going to therapy twice per week for four years, and I feel like I’ve gotten everything out of it that is possible. I don’t want to continue, but my therapist always talks about a fifth year. How do I talk to her about me wanting to end the relationship?",2.1964285714285694,4.083356115384618,4.337765567765569,83.8096153846154,77.58974358974359,9.072527472527472,26.52747252747253,9.606745405546679,2.5750087912087922,299,12,63,9,7,103,52,78,0.0,0.9359999999999999,0.064,0.3421,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,2,0,11,14,4,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,2,1,10,1,14,11,0,10,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,7,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336653936733277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15931176846339892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845588149954747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443729225547586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122443808037452,0.11476128679426288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18259088946914667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848061622341036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181097524461562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17246730031326654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873491718068527,0.0,0.0,0.5511177055783121,0.3730309684378225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842489979638498,0.0,0.12885576179402414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068938561849012
mentalhealth,babybrooklyn2,2020/01/07,Something worth Sharing.. https://youtu.be/oMBVxhO57JE[Video game that helps us understand loneliness...](https://youtu.be/oMBVxhO57JE),26.777500000000003,32.645291750000005,15.080000000000002,-7.7099999999999795,89.83333333333331,17.866666666666667,61.33333333333334,9.516144504307137,13.892433333333333,119,7,5,5,4,30,12,12,0.0,0.64,0.36,0.5423,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3546197023181677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4072984596131696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5507731258361015,0.6363975136510538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamnotjeromylove,2020/01/07,"Minor(?) memory loss Alright, so this is my first ever post on here and Im starting out with a banger. I have bipolar ii(professional diagnosis), I am currently on Lamotrogine(about eight months) and Escatalopram(about one month). I have been experiencing some memory loss of distant past conversations/events and recent conversations/events, I constantly misplace things such as my phone, remotes, clothing, etc. I have searched online and it has said that Lamotrigine actually helps with memory in most cases, but I have only experienced the weird random memory loss for about 3-4 months. If anyone has advice, information, or similar experiences, I’d love to hear about it.",8.718040540540539,11.042261378378381,8.53115990990991,58.61133445945949,61.34234234234235,12.036486486486487,34.59572072072072,11.698219412168324,5.031296396396397,547,23,76,18,8,176,84,111,0.076,0.841,0.083,0.4215,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,4,6,6,0,0,2,1,9,2,0,0,1,15,13,9,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,2,4,8,2,12,11,3,15,0,3,0,1,6,4,0,5,10,53,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.20605180467230946,0.0,0.0,0.2063331994812128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764089162359406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228177986348692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354879088971179,0.0,0.19099713697007095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206545079607429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17960396308996085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379812381772839,0.0,0.14152930034142905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280780823485833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905709925332904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5056134114068633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430806097691275,0.16058898334278754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015664335194645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20222319871265484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20848501348742235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20085186973604835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945295772358091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14027858467178211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,naynay20x,2020/01/07,"Am I a Narcassit? Hello,

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I have been worrying very recently that I might be a Narcissist. I went to a mental health professional not too long ago, and I was told I shown traits of BPD and they suggested I partake in DBT in the future.

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However, I have no idea what to believe. I know something is wrong with me, but I want that definitive answer. 

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I met my new partner 4 months ago. A lot of my behaviours I see in myself, I worry about them. I am very quick to anger, sometimes when he tells me no, I act like a child. What I see in him is nothing how I am. He is very stable in his job, he is great with his money, he is head strong and knows what he wants. I am the opposite, I feel like I can't do anything myself without someone prodding me or helping me. I feel like I keep playing the victim. He is also very smart and logical, and thinks rationally about things. Sometimes this irritates me, as sometimes he will tell me to do something a different way and this sparks annoyance and anger in me. I feel like he thinks I'm incompetent but I do know it's only coming from a place in him of care and just trying to offer easier solutions to something that I'm making a mountain out of a mole hill of.

​

My childhood is very confusing. I love and hate my mother. I have some real deep resentment towards her. She was very aggressive growing up, punishing myself and my sister with physical violence. She would scream in our face, throw things, leave, come back. I never grew up with a father.

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There was a time when I was 6, my sister 8. My mother was towering over my sister screaming at her and hitting her. I remember putting myself between them and screaming ""don't hurt my sister"" I was then punished and told to be respectful. There was also a time where after an argument with her, I broke my glasses (I was 11 at the time). I used to be bullied for wearing these. She punished me by smashing my PS3 into pieces with a hammer. After many arguments, I would remember laying on my bed crying and feeling so alone. I would usually be the one to apologise. My mother tells me I'm manipulative. And sometimes during confrontation, if I try to be level headed as I'm now an adult she asks me why I'm always analysing her. 

​

There was a time when I was 9 and I pretended to be dead in the park. The ambulance came and they knew I was just pretending. My mother came too. I do not know my reasoning's behind this, I can't remember what was going on in my head at the time. I think looking at it, I may have been calling out for help or attention. 

​

Another thing, my mother was incredibly drunk one night. I was probably about 11/12. I hadn't really seen my dad, maybe 3-5 times in my life. Mum would say she made contact with him to arrange things but he wouldn't show. He was always painted to me growing up as a bad terrible man who deserted us. But, on this night, me and my mum walked to my dads house (while shes incredible intoxicated). She said I wanted to go, to this day when I asked her, but I don't remember asking to go. And even if I did, it was 10.30pm and she was intoxicated, she should have said no? Anyway, we got to his house and she knocked on the door, he opened it and my mum said ""here is your kid he's come to see you"" and he slammed the door. My mother retaliated instantly, kicking and banging the door and screaming. My dads wife opened the door and told my mum to be quiet as her kid was upstairs sleeping. My mum screamed at her ""what about Kevins (my dads name) son (as in me)"", I don't remember much else of this conversation, next thing I know, my mum leaned into the door and grabbed the lady by the chin. She shoved my mum out the door and they ended up in a scuffle on the floor. I remember jumping on the ladies back screaming ""get off my mum"" and I think I was pulling the ladies hair. The police came, my mum was arrested and I was taken home. Social services came out soon after as my dad reported my mum to them, I was scared and didn't know what to say to them. My mum told me to tell them exactly how I feel about her. So I said that she was the best mum and that I couldn't have asked for better... But I think I could have.

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My mother in an argument regularly says things like ""after all I've done for you, you disrespect me like that"" or ""you have no respect for me"" or ""i tried my hardest and it's never good enough for you"". She would sometimes say things growing up and still does like ""i dont even want to be here anymore"". She would result to calling me a cunt, a bastard, a little shit, you name it. She still does now and I'm an adult.

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I grew up with just her and my sister (I am a male), my sister is 2 years older than me.

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I'm worried for my partner. I don't want to hurt him, but I feel like I'm a bad person and my behaviour growing up wasn't good either, I focus too much on how I feel during situations with him and I don't like that I seem to blame him for how I feel. After I perceive the situation differently. I can be very quick to react to something that might not even seem like such a big issue, but to me it feels like it is. I feel like I change too, I notice myself becoming cold and inconsiderate to his point of view until after I calm down. This is really not fair on him. And I'm considering leaving the relationship, which is incredible painful to even think about. I don't want to bring him down with my toxicity and ruin him.

​

Am I a bad person? I need help.",2.676041868689751,4.3766696756032175,4.216555910482388,86.0347545776054,75.65773011617516,7.335428669214535,25.219715551499252,8.128838120801504,1.4632645903447226,4313,149,898,72,94,1438,403,1119,0.16899999999999998,0.7240000000000001,0.107,-0.998,5,1,4,0,0,1,193.0,3,7,8,3,46,57,14,2,50,0,94,15,8,11,4,168,176,76,1,19,23,33,12,12,2,12,5,15,8,11,39,67,1,1,37,5,1,24,25,32,0,2,49,34,202,25,130,103,9,126,0,4,6,1,150,55,3,14,58,632,241,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05447296964536314,0.0,0.0,0.031822565421296946,0.0,0.04914267258211828,0.05113249818607735,0.3662041902803097,0.4106860598241449,0.0,0.03221858216294453,0.0,0.0,0.030471644485198637,0.0,0.0,0.025284638350749768,0.0,0.11489755119865945,0.0,0.0,0.04725234324284478,0.07696404424063881,0.0,0.03393412870037352,0.0,0.034617349347680994,0.03224473322019137,0.027174390394916502,0.0,0.0,0.03869795158105505,0.0,0.0627487631074516,0.14056809070780266,0.03132690541522297,0.0,0.032503723266586036,0.07940242621875394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024531976370812357,0.0,0.033750745690223606,0.019815538740722952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420364706736112,0.0,0.0,0.05377654541974362,0.031443065363968806,0.03601029904404183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02566738504382013,0.0,0.027213855979709458,0.03174786818940313,0.0,0.08117615713136077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535840349822186,0.1317027046622275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.016052913426697943,0.0,0.05238638102951857,0.05154252948027428,0.02457415423864619,0.03387519975503634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0303352738874438,0.09460031733663636,0.032659989082955435,0.0,0.0,0.061784379948922136,0.0,0.030820388719939206,0.0,0.0,0.07090667970004004,0.06578500832756802,0.03468558255699505,0.0,0.032069654671412616,0.030490522527711957,0.0273104195913249,0.0,0.0,0.1013162680782866,0.0,0.0,0.06506817322893912,0.0,0.0,0.02170247508316537,0.18013233746169802,0.03079522972528337,0.0,0.027191283264557633,0.02580185489216519,0.0,0.0,0.0261218968024746,0.027731149619467158,0.029073406293096533,0.020509647597557572,0.031151043678838024,0.030868101874171907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03096428526760365,0.06519023785176868,0.0,0.0,0.024524965692043592,0.0,0.04517385906852675,0.02278272195663304,0.04739511787968112,0.029675078685636267,0.03267713731048958,0.057667988042078525,0.0,0.02948214394833175,0.03498142036204865,0.0,0.0,0.041641067661009785,0.023368284255218016,0.03269431791151384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05365700333025141,0.03210182353368057,0.0,0.029045723954916326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033127508250644484,0.0,0.0,0.030887821408777407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03497258057343747,0.03936734856719416,0.03159114351763781,0.030337928273246387,0.03298790987732484,0.20883741425913088,0.0,0.11690873153272995,0.09773725981117724,0.030761792229027144,0.0,0.07345322974233064,0.05594305822274229,0.0,0.0,0.03153949605863182,0.0,0.06907396265512511,0.030747896117517163,0.03132098827479366,0.02603379130694517,0.09461659957356358,0.15194254631965484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04907517760989249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074224866652059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288955825648608,0.11812675199129315,0.0,0.0,0.1074984388779902,0.0,0.0,0.11743891666859438,0.0,0.06258221323070498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03695924161849338,0.02653714511806934,0.03384002468228358,0.17746347933753134,0.10873690619055963,0.024388635560399767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028483037641783383,0.0277251709298885,0.0,0.0,0.029618484500768306,0.0,0.0,0.09361033886999656,0.0,0.1309599614918956,0.03359373652415119,0.4106860598241449,0.019786347526757037
mentalhealth,rocknroll500,2020/01/07,"Does anyone else’s anxiety get extreme after going awhile without eating? I have debilitating anxiety due to having complex ptsd from childhood trauma. I have tmj too and my ears often ring from stress. A few weeks ago I had an episode that was basically an emotional flashback. I experienced horrible depression. Couldn’t leave my bed, could not go to work, could barely stand and could not eat. Although my depression or emotional flashback or whatever it’s called seems to be at bay right now due to outside distractions that snapped me out of it and I’m more functional, my appetite is still extremely suppressed. I’m barely eating. If it weren’t for alcohol a few times a week I’d get very little calories. Despite how low my appetite is, my stomach always growls and my body is craving food. But even after not eating for so long and feeling like I’m going to pass out, food still doesn’t taste good which is crazy to me! I thought I’d want to gulf it down but I still had to force it down. 

Before I finally made myself eat tonight, my anxiety was getting so bad it started to take the form of ocd where I was getting obsessive, intrusive thoughts that only come when my anxiety is at its worst. After I got some food down, those symptoms got way better. I didn’t even realize not eating was having such a huge impact on my anxiety. I don’t know what to do. I feel like I have to force feed myself but my ocd symptoms are worse than anything so I’d rather never experience them. But I just can’t eat. Food tastes gross even if I go days without barely eating a full meal.",4.8475333135919465,6.172917166123781,5.534357417826474,80.23856307373411,69.52117263843648,8.578560852827954,30.566923304708318,8.97023862654752,2.57005667752443,1258,51,234,23,22,408,169,307,0.15,0.785,0.065,-0.9786,1,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,2,18,14,0,3,8,0,28,22,3,2,1,43,52,19,0,8,16,0,2,2,0,0,3,2,1,0,13,8,17,1,8,0,0,6,13,10,0,0,13,7,31,4,31,34,7,43,0,3,0,0,2,14,0,7,23,155,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06488165408955797,0.07822163121704033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06090288599359332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27996427639695914,0.0,0.0,0.051178622734814064,0.07499542801928798,0.06023204425729565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611135458958114,0.0,0.0,0.06228230882128005,0.0,0.0,0.06473373525166932,0.0,0.08130151903502504,0.0,0.0,0.07473878455664193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06304975091727744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17531724986391412,0.0,0.0,0.04720377605788415,0.0,0.1260829719140932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06405215725836988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5991620871090876,0.06114380797076256,0.16466575454125038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14503092216943814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159732368665453,0.0,0.0,0.07401770280784115,0.10457895456756118,0.0,0.08017994184520476,0.0,0.0,0.3540236607194777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15296240801430874,0.0,0.16639029473830436,0.061391265987729426,0.11707911540240447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04022525362515505,0.0,0.0,0.07750138711299039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151732982199831,0.07335915246230335,0.0,0.06477397676344193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925749422491546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645136778521586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055666982930591115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855593276217273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250688046757201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663264690635297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051806762041492115,0.0,0.1753573590056532,0.0,0.0838429490597074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521522199898915,0.055032430593033456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621498477492895,0.042679739889690094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06039233327159633,0.04317144435827628,0.058097622598801926,0.11742288044036993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411119150321089,0.0,0.053285766489727666,0.0,0.07459046705390962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,milkbxy,2020/01/07,Talking to your therapist Does anybody have any tips on how to open up to your therapist? I often times find it hard to talk to my therapist and find myself rambling about insignificant events. Talking about serious topics makes me uncomfortable and I feel dumb when I talk about them. How do I get past that feeling and talk to her about how I really feel?,7.120671641791044,7.6196156567164195,6.9693656716417935,74.92927238805972,64.07462686567163,10.87910447761194,33.167910447761194,10.686352973137794,3.53873432835821,287,11,52,7,4,91,43,67,0.165,0.813,0.022000000000000002,-0.8343,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,1,0,9,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,14,7,7,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,12,0,12,7,0,7,0,0,0,0,9,3,1,1,4,36,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983005026325636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14133554487452352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24498782252973456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952282773440816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438055097354466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14467822204096192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078069331437944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541763581954506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346528614995228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6490645782256513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.562564954917315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417581781172636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ethos57,2020/01/07,"Feel lost at 19 (need advice) So basically I am 1 year out of high school and I am struggling to decide with path to take with my life and I am having to deal with other factors that are causing me stress and extreme anxiety. Basically all through school I had planned to get a trade and start up like that, however as encouraged by one of my teachers I decided to try university studying marketing as it was an area that interested me. I ended up hating it and wanted out so I decided to try something else which was paramedicine. Now this is where the dilemma begins, most of my senior years of school I had struggled with mild depression and abit of anxiety mainly due to my unattractive looks and inability to get any interest from girls, so subconsciously I thought that studying paramedicine which would be something abit more interesting for me would dull the pain and give me something to focus on rather than not getting girls and feeling lonely. This worked only for a short while but eventually I realised that no matter what I studied I still wouldn’t get any interest from girls just because I was studying something different. So now I am back on the trade path but now am feeling the lonely and isolated feelings again and I now have ambition to try studying nursing as I feel it would be more interesting and give me the human to human contact that I crave. I just need advice now, am I choosing this career path again but subconsciously I am lonely and feel that doing that would somehow cure it because I hate my current situation? Or am I just genuinely interested in it but I am letting my emotions question it? 

Thankyou.",8.531840163934426,8.152134993442626,8.209620901639344,70.15607069672134,61.360655737704924,11.034836065573769,40.04610655737704,10.411451182825502,4.271036885245901,1323,64,225,26,16,423,151,305,0.136,0.785,0.079,-0.9309,3,6,4,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,19,20,2,3,8,0,27,2,0,1,1,54,50,26,0,9,10,0,6,1,0,5,2,0,0,5,21,19,0,0,12,0,2,0,3,12,0,1,7,7,34,8,38,35,5,30,0,6,1,0,11,12,0,4,19,174,55,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20476141819430024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249532861164674,0.0,0.16029858748273146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805621961763245,0.0,0.12773448459664666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762836261860302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080139845110413,0.09023884477138223,0.0,0.0,0.10946307538006553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752247051987694,0.11785292841395577,0.09279573683294877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178512637802674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189534523673004,0.2010111919880017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20687873813350804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069598997069664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713513251384224,0.07400263924166406,0.05118566866165122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879809953488574,0.0,0.11436958833694805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553722833399469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099533338816715,0.07968283353897218,0.11148340474468817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117367154595996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181006057230777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776664919026948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226303938921131,0.0,0.0,0.07415723609617085,0.0,0.0836700111500778,0.0,0.12001447539686605,0.21905815396109615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877452262245606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317622762222616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21339727062970898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617964695289262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627431266558181,0.0,0.0,0.297704378517471,0.0,0.0,0.13493778311660007
mentalhealth,scrltstrlt,2020/01/07,Isolating myself I really wish I wasn’t like this but after developing PTSD I can’t help but have complete and utter disgust towards people. I pick out faults in people constantly and make myself hate others. It’s probably a coping thing to avoid getting hurt but I really miss how I used to be.,4.0189473684210535,6.257932649122813,5.831438596491227,73.55873684210529,73.3859649122807,8.770526315789473,25.43508771929825,9.3871,2.6509045614035096,239,8,39,6,5,82,44,57,0.348,0.545,0.107,-0.9631,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,7,2,1,1,0,4,0,0,4,0,12,10,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,0,8,1,6,8,0,5,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,29,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763272765963434,0.2848040415458491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13769405510049268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602011711593353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17665208366243598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28213584415080784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875727155431768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17592174525111634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3654249251179815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841515944900073,0.0,0.3080759756555397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3376738987302041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17509098268490425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22762267664261826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030696204670318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NudlePockets,2020/01/07,"I did something for myself, and I’m proud! Today I did something for myself, something I’ve always wanted to try out but never had the guts for. Before I get into that, let me just say that my anxiety (and depression wooooo) is often times crippling. I like being home and I like staying home. I like doing things that require no effort or interaction save for activities with the people I’m comfortable with. I’m just a homebody and I don’t do anything alone or really for myself. I know it’s okay to take time for oneself and be alone but I also know it’s not healthy to do that ALL THE TIME. 

So today I went and had myself a climbing lesson at a climbing gym nearby. I’ve never done it before, at least in a gym, and it’s been a hot minute since I got some real physical activity. I was equal parts terrified and excited. The whole ordeal caused a bit of anxiety because I really figured out how much I hate heights. But! I also had so much fun! My arms feel like noodles right now and it’s a feat I can hold my phone but I really did enjoy myself. I’m terrified of balaying (I don’t know how to spell that word so there it is phonetically) and my teacher had to talk me down from the near top of one of the walls because I was way too scared to just grab the rope and hop down. Poor guy had to do it twice lol but I learned a lot, my body hurts and dammit I’m proud of myself. I’ll be coming back for sure!",1.6435731324544882,3.475870891525428,3.7111111111111117,87.91603264281231,79.0677966101695,6.539861895794099,21.773383553044567,7.526774132740827,0.8033063402385432,1103,32,235,16,27,376,149,295,0.147,0.691,0.162,0.608,0,2,3,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,8,15,17,1,1,15,2,25,3,3,3,4,52,41,26,0,1,11,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,13,18,0,2,7,2,1,4,6,4,0,2,14,4,34,13,31,23,10,28,0,2,0,0,5,13,0,5,13,167,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431789719460893,0.0,0.18776714634711789,0.09768499315900532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17961912955967138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966089986580566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027223370989318,0.0,0.14313012546336112,0.0,0.19979502816250155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816880402572384,0.13040331670963204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060064354321738,0.0,0.10112845042645653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111519386939136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201394703540528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059360231247414574,0.08386954324777643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133589376222076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389434014957336,0.0,0.0,0.11624301587297245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590675704471505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235520623327175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256775693817627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193557508536092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004796517292733,0.0,0.2294199941574901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998080438457736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17260287569037455,0.0,0.1810899889537385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955229167165936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12713118268197787,0.0,0.08138936851248195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13362524481540822,0.2256255402276614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025771506965786,0.0,0.09336003417328056,0.11753642282510142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711328870990198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711374040958321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12513122746628744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11064673830835874,0.0,0.08826909461350355,0.09436050264082982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799437604511145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053681051957577,0.0,0.22256018520657414,0.0,0.0,0.07970590509216054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924470290695628,0.09318549972681836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882962639767517,0.0,0.13107128176483868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigboiz2020,2020/01/07,Hardest part of journaling A situation I have is that I would feel embarrassed if someone read through my journal. But then I have to remind myself again that no one is going to read through my journal.,8.27342105263158,7.863436868421054,7.967368421052632,71.78157894736844,61.89473684210528,10.757894736842106,42.6842105263158,10.125756701596842,4.4918,163,9,28,3,2,52,28,38,0.128,0.872,0.0,-0.5719,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,7,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,6,0,5,6,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,26,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143762512388544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19269415215204672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22975409075661146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3671661578834971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6782983713890383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3811147594480184,0.0,0.0,0.28728226179825656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408566716159112,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaymathcomp,2020/01/07,"Math Competitions are Stressing Me Out I really fucking hate math competitions. If it wasn't for my mom saying that I need them to get into good colleges, I wouldn't come within five miles of one in the first place.

Anyways, the AMC is coming up soon, and I'm completely fucking miserable. I suck at math. My peers think I'm good. I'm actually not (still waiting for the day they find out). What takes normal people a few seconds to get takes me a whole hour. I've been doing practice tests recently, and I'm doing really bad. Currently all of my time is devoted to math. I've stopped volunteering, another sport I enjoy doing, and video games just to focus my time on something that might or might not help me get into a good college. 

It's so bad that my evenings consists of one hour of studying, 15 minutes of sitting on the floor leaning against my bed and bawling, then back to studying. And I stay awake in the middle of the night crying for like the fourth time. I don't even know why I'm that upset. I could just take this again next year if I want to, since I'll still qualify anyways. I've already talked to conselors about this, but this is just becoming worse and worse. 

Currently I'm finishing one of my crying sessions and am about to go back to math. This is the FIFTH time I'm doing counting balls and boxes, and I'm still struggling to determine whether to use permutation and combination. Like WHAT THE FUCK.

It's not like I've never been under any pressure either. This is definetly not my first math competition, and the other sport I'm doing is waaaaaaaaayyyyyyyy more competitive. I've tried to ""enjoy math"" and ""have fun learning,"" but nothing is working for me.

Thanks for reading my rant. It's probably like illegable or something.",5.042146017699113,6.335057731563424,5.5128502949852525,80.69635508849561,69.02949852507375,8.481858407079647,30.64417404129793,8.841846274778883,2.471891740412979,1397,56,262,24,24,448,174,339,0.135,0.7609999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.9016,2,0,2,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,2,3,17,24,5,5,13,0,23,3,0,1,2,49,53,21,0,7,15,1,0,4,0,3,0,1,1,0,16,18,0,2,4,6,0,3,8,12,0,7,3,1,24,12,39,46,5,47,0,1,0,3,7,16,4,6,30,167,40,15,0.0,0.0,0.0939177674228048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620482786362558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544748292816982,0.10091754663413928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14800746130494313,0.16071517330227084,0.0,0.10629111480726472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658069663084261,0.10090732411783808,0.0,0.0,0.0768409626751495,0.0,0.21143341658575515,0.06206777023377062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12713313362849146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796293726114192,0.16372584807517376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669209955444973,0.1508465485376777,0.0,0.05469623113563133,0.2421682740177895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501850210889948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450861196832264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18955687412253305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05289178129604878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18807483493190488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20419392868451544,0.0,0.11271681732384585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136181207115591,0.0742273355584577,0.0,0.10235386869985466,0.09031607665260416,0.09429618220495327,0.092346262220133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956470818449842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672170010469537,0.0,0.10055182618269007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376455555521907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626748940243612,0.0,0.12330946826895205,0.0,0.0950268163823726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765350599927364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961191791885038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14818273274003266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258057514548287,0.2305756271323937,0.08046215751072677,0.11024425019681178,0.10061245467715237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21708476796002976,0.07735522801069797,0.0,0.08860619220267299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061667631961219924,0.0,0.0,0.22447664236538786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534162376891836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312170803933755,0.0,0.0,0.05676569785018196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684293480408056,0.10745013647464786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006491826330002,0.0,0.1961565093883389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061976335245048475
mentalhealth,TheGrammatikialError,2020/01/07,"I need help First off i want to say that i dont know if this is the right sub to post this. English is not my first language, expressing my self in english is really hard for me, and this is on mobile yadda yadda....

Im just falling appart, i am always angry, like really really angry all the time, constantly fantasizing about different outcomes from things from the past, and imagined present/future things.

From the outside my life looks great, but i always feel so f***** angry, wich is really affecting my life, and after googling and searching for therapy and realizing i cant afford anything i dont know what to do.

If this is the wrong sub please point me to the right one. Im at my wits end.",1.9079075425790748,4.393279547445257,3.6479124087591215,85.17634549878349,81.99270072992701,6.865012165450122,22.272019464720195,8.021203637495839,1.4036261800486618,546,18,105,11,15,182,81,137,0.11199999999999999,0.8140000000000001,0.07400000000000001,-0.7428,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,6,0,11,2,0,1,1,19,17,9,0,4,5,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,8,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,1,0,3,0,4,14,2,15,17,1,16,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,2,8,69,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414276853411001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938418673567705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15677430363098938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515722725449632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3400531347013695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284931988747672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335417021552296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24680107571609256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599454624251605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12995851160868035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09724057022092253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31341132513150144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15945861540948122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20494122178165647,0.07087621185356227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12182628123220715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757111470953803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830642876028206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384902976666018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592485485942356,0.13714256397121194,0.0,0.13894154148489965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37175448803641137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477861471255437,0.0,0.11536929176589315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15134464020419092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16590565983674438,0.0,0.19276248141354052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459427369018305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556886684604045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15861650298152175,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,usmccarter,2020/01/07,"Looking for books, activities for 9yr old I am looking for books, activities for my 9 yr old niece who witnessed a very traumatic event of the drowning of her 2 younger brothers just before Christmas. 
I have seen several but I am hoping someone here could give me better suggestions.",8.218823529411765,8.86045166666667,7.930196078431373,68.4858823529412,61.74509803921569,10.72156862745098,42.49019607843137,10.504223727775694,4.862301960784314,229,13,36,5,3,73,40,51,0.048,0.807,0.145,0.723,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,9,1,1,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,6,2,6,7,0,3,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,1,3,22,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278223875113251,0.0,0.0,0.2367894574987632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21376425714792868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568353822814307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26592082469360395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4496591926139785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5618847572890318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024638405850381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22685062040474546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209090480700637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,depressionacceptance,2020/01/07,"Sometimes I just get so depressed it physically hurts All I want to do is sit in the dark. That’s it. I don’t enjoy anything anymore. 

I’m not going to give you my - sob story - about how my life sucks. 

I just don’t get it. How do people enjoy their life so much. I’m literally taking 2 antidepressants. I don’t talk to anyone anymore. 

The only time I’m remotely happy is when I drink. Everyday it feels like the future holds nothing for me. This confession has meant nothing. /rant.",-0.0928737113402036,2.1714366907216562,2.4671585051546394,88.17228414948454,99.61855670103094,4.899226804123711,19.464561855670105,6.6274283507984215,0.5791654639175259,377,13,74,6,16,129,64,97,0.11900000000000001,0.742,0.139,0.2637,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,0,8,8,1,0,3,0,8,3,0,2,1,11,20,5,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,0,1,1,3,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,1,11,4,6,19,2,7,1,3,0,0,5,1,2,0,5,44,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4174463905898508,0.1471609420675079,0.0,0.1731934917726086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812718663971342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20617406276409234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641664715476153,0.15035513513465915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199169385715785,0.2018957247884302,0.11961123226906692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240422626364238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22530548273006615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29731312646201924,0.10282181376091094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15471485651464473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40389072483631894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600669422576917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14590886068219092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20815373968077344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15824232653346665,0.1691625538489203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227229337902934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241367993644196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AllTheGoodUsers,2020/01/07,Help I have school in the morning but it doesn’t matter how tired I am I’m stuck lying in bed crying,-1.214057971014494,0.7916412173913088,1.2521739130434817,99.74028985507248,93.34782608695652,3.066666666666667,12.014492753623188,3.1291,-1.7305246376811592,80,1,19,0,3,27,20,23,0.486,0.418,0.096,-0.9337,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,3,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,11,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5491484758541124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33509183660663977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5059547865350463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5745947845995212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AMonsterMask,2020/01/07,"I keep seeing this all red silhouette just before I start having a mental breakdown. I've been calling him the Red Man because I don't think he has a proper name. Every time I start panicking, hallucinating, or hearing voices, I'll see him somewhere nearby, just watching me. 
  
  
Now, when I see him, I start panicking even when he hasn't said or done anything. It's awful. 
  
  
Today, I started seeing the Red Man, and my throat felt like it was closing off almost instantly. I could faintly smell blood from somewhere, and my eyes were starting to tear up a bit because I was starting to panic a lot. 
  
  
I have one person that I talk to about this, but it doesn't help at all that I'm constantly being told that someone that's actively trying to break me mentally and physically just doesn't exist. Sure, nobody else around me sees him or experiences these things, but he's torturing me, and that means he's real enough for now. 
  
  
I just need to know how to get rid of him, or how to effectively block him out. Or, at the very least, I want someone to just be there for me instead of constantly telling me that something that's hurting me doesn't really exist, or that I'm acting crazy.",8.032337662337664,6.462405307359308,8.129004329004328,74.18493506493509,63.02597402597402,10.824242424242424,35.285714285714285,9.573946990214177,3.1562,930,33,177,14,11,304,131,231,0.13,0.8240000000000001,0.046,-0.9581,0,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,16,5,1,1,7,1,16,4,3,3,3,39,40,16,0,3,13,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,0,3,15,7,0,2,5,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,8,15,28,2,20,29,6,23,0,1,10,0,21,7,0,8,15,118,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307007842175068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292108114668678,0.10052008201680966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376663270239507,0.0,0.0960840619531882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327613374300195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153008958973075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24404635467616834,0.0,0.09015504732237002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555330899558955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432767577667728,0.0,0.0,0.11667345980348445,0.0,0.07458062262294231,0.0,0.09513745413838944,0.0,0.0,0.11045450650410868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841804093317872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05899447919604929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272656810322931,0.0,0.0756858941147202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087999860318648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003658300266064,0.0,0.0,0.062056237710981364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551655492498026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599800712261893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299973070884924,0.0,0.0,0.22758758294953724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372653491450574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651549081872921,0.0,0.0,0.13248378628241692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859478097677613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12852428230507246,0.07233753040081903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074099377931867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4499012026387778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19134843860773101,0.08692903379551367,0.0,0.0,0.4795394609926249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642294912255368,0.0,0.0,0.09075841841571032,0.0986944470188604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501704650852024,0.07235266300900055,0.0,0.0,0.06584281876053064,0.0,0.10703212597617108,0.10789704557132664,0.0,0.07666324025521941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931683619535797,0.06660138027689742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Loveesticy44,2020/01/07,"I feel I would be happier if I didn’t have the job I currently have. This is a throwaway account but I really need to hear from someone even if it’s one person.

I feel that most of my depression, frustration, or anything else comes from the fact that I hate my job.

To give everyone a better idea I’m a 20 year old office assistant. I had joined this business program back in highschool for this company that I currently work for when I was a senior. During that time, I felt mixed as it was my first job where I just wasn’t covering a shift for a friend. Then I got transferred to a new department and encountered a few problems listed below.

My boss expects me to be perfect in every aspect which I have reached in most parts but some parts I have not. Which irks me that I can’t be a perfect worker because of some mistakes I make. One time she put me on this performance plan and if I had not improved in the 30 days then I would be terminated. I survived it but have always felt anger that she never fully told me if I had made it or not and acts like she never had.

There is also woman that sits next to me who I also work with on my boss’s calendar I feel dislikes me. She never says anything good about me and will take any chance to make me feel like a idiot. What angers the most is that she’ll see some mistake I made on the calendar and write a whole email about it and cc my boss when we literally sit right next to each other. Sometimes she will send these emails out as soon as I leave for the day only for me to see them in the morning and make me upset in less than a whole minute of being there.

My parents have put a lot of pressure with me on this job because of the endless possibilities they can see me end up in when I feel I have no real future than just being front desk.

I feel that if I didn’t live where I am then I would have a more normal job like my friends who work at stores and restaurants. They have no problem with their jobs and some seem to enjoy it but my parents always tell me that they have loser jobs that will get them nowhere. Partly true if they plan on other things but still harsh I feel.

The only two good things I can think of is that my other coworkers see me as valuable and do compliment me about my hard work ethic and do make me feel like I’m not a damn burden. And also that I have saved money while working there and not wasting it.

I am in the probationary period as they call it and I have only until July of this year to fully complete it. I feel mixed about this. Part of me knows I can quit now but there’s another part that wants me to see the end and make my decision then since I have had already survived a year and a half. I am more on the edge to leave if that happens and will probably start job searching a month or two in advance that isn’t in this industry and something I’m more into.

When I was nearing the end of highschool, my first thoughts were to the join the military or a trade. But because of the program I was in didn’t go through with either. I still wonder if I would have been happier if I had quit and pursued these two.",5.354188166494668,4.786400199690405,5.930005159958721,84.50838579291367,67.90092879256966,8.911523907808737,29.39955280357757,8.167268648758528,1.7669210182318538,2443,74,530,28,36,795,258,646,0.136,0.762,0.102,-0.9625,12,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,1,0,8,20,25,31,6,2,35,0,59,0,0,10,7,114,103,57,0,21,28,2,12,4,2,9,0,2,0,2,45,28,0,0,18,0,4,9,16,15,0,8,23,19,91,16,70,65,22,78,0,2,5,0,33,26,1,23,45,404,136,25,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06302058229475098,0.13700879360011994,0.0950375918678862,0.0,0.0,0.038835696708206434,0.05988317744658159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399075833771643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04391286433504945,0.0,0.10443832267289456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05050777324065663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05831410110961911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049193863289815495,0.059877111536558676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366043711104614,0.0,0.04918741464699335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047706772613247135,0.0,0.1517433782526561,0.0,0.0,0.03771958521750015,0.0,0.04811632274634689,0.054569560591093816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598816831139613,0.08159656016307358,0.10966611407278484,0.0,0.0,0.09715281771981724,0.0,0.0,0.08824367628926567,0.0,0.029836802203269563,0.054783618263560666,0.03245604182817328,0.09579969792906744,0.04567483545458488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050500803817435824,0.0,0.0511579439142356,0.056382760107356274,0.0,0.0,0.06436536102990488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446847612951444,0.0,0.0,0.453370508169897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03138530444363381,0.0,0.0,0.12093918173950335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116011941342004,0.0,0.05042779772562641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048551552441155485,0.0,0.10807477121252357,0.19060163172915198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04558341099494708,0.0,0.0,0.04234518374350772,0.13213664585253784,0.05515568604744648,0.1214709450660396,0.0,0.05595414474338967,0.0,0.0,0.059925699835441465,0.0,0.07739631220263056,0.13030062331111786,0.0,0.0,0.12682432589380396,0.3092143701577786,0.0,0.0,0.04986488597522453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438118403378801,0.0,0.0,0.061572556014523785,0.10929012651554552,0.0,0.11481950887879132,0.0,0.121483708537172,0.0,0.06500190597004929,0.036585128233266505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048770294690441834,0.0,0.04541492268976115,0.0,0.0,0.2275401593009615,0.051989377830379865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04724069070843268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04838779486187643,0.0439648662455142,0.056481706221139134,0.0,0.04042164691024629,0.0,0.09121374597345464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04293843873629137,0.0,0.04991529265775782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758806182900614,0.036592781638183115,0.0,0.045337721323806264,0.06660077982331741,0.0,0.0,0.054569560591093816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673599395478994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03368403682627311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751906489557965,0.0,0.0,0.06193166578357261,0.20787811798241185,0.0,0.0,0.16227278557768268,0.0,0.0,0.11032788661885368
mentalhealth,nacreous-clouds,2020/01/07,"Therapy for minors? Hello lovely people! 

Is it possible for me to see a therapist without parental consent? 

(context)
I have been wondering recently about the privacy and consent laws regarding mental health treatment for minors in California. I am 17, and I’m coping with my issues, but the methods I’m using are significantly damaging my body and interfering with my day-to-day life. I think I would benefit from having someone to talk to, but I don’t want to worry my family. They are under enough stress as it is. That fear has left me afraid to mention it to anyone, as it will ultimately get back to them due to the laws I’ve looked into for pediatric care and education. And I wouldn’t be able to use their insurance because the insurance company would disclose what I am paying for. I have my own income and I could pay out of pocket instead. I could drive myself to an appointment. The only limitation is my worry about the confidentiality of my issues due to my age. Any tips?",4.698870967741937,6.691849424731183,6.501913978494624,70.53287096774194,70.88172043010752,9.691182795698925,30.14193548387097,10.047579312681364,3.4674735483870966,787,33,132,22,15,272,115,186,0.14400000000000002,0.794,0.062,-0.9423,2,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,3,1,4,7,0,3,8,0,20,5,1,2,0,26,32,10,0,6,3,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,6,10,0,1,2,0,2,1,3,4,0,0,1,2,24,3,30,24,2,11,0,1,2,1,8,5,0,1,5,100,30,2,0.1489139667379956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10126660385934347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041241079653928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145056485109191,0.0,0.09077657195401403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16540984679516976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518277136850143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377913704010668,0.0,0.0,0.19207437840182084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538679348528293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403828348369356,0.16756961312736904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780140142328419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158288583111469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108549844225884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16179546057721836,0.0,0.10518233861624267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505022711902808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344006689704747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15007025353312808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325578202458453,0.0,0.0,0.16535133728272,0.0,0.0,0.10323819451910353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16787812276243824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14703457703896444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866515153391485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617432077301638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17058044577059914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969140570319554,0.0,0.0,0.170296098945786,0.1729005929257965,0.0,0.09541805700326997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25722771002117706,0.0,0.0,0.08783331580990891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354774992813246,0.16149084468282604,0.0,0.3024587233567928,0.0,0.21156841884048047,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jhaj,2020/01/07,"I feel so alone despite everything pointing towards it not being the case I feel so stuck in this depression and I can’t speak to anyone. I have a girlfriend who seems to hate me at the moment and I can’t bring any of this up to her for fear of being manipulative. I have a loving mother who I know would do anything for me but it would break her heart to tell her I’ve slipped back again. My brothers moved cities. I have plenty of friends but none I feel I can talk to about any of this. I feel so alone and I can’t get the thought of suicide out of my head. I’ve taken a couple of sleeping pills so hopefully they’ll knock me out. I’m sick of holding people back and bringing people down. I really don’t know what to do, I’ve tried all the things you’re supposed to do and none of it seems to work. I’m just tired of all of this.",2.085404761904762,3.2287559055555555,3.4531746031746064,93.205,76.05555555555556,6.253968253968254,22.857142857142854,6.5431188927421005,0.3297142857142856,653,18,153,5,14,214,94,180,0.154,0.7829999999999999,0.063,-0.9372,0,2,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,1,1,9,6,1,1,7,0,16,7,3,1,2,27,35,11,1,3,4,2,4,0,2,3,3,1,0,0,11,7,0,1,9,0,0,3,7,3,0,0,3,5,22,3,29,27,4,16,0,1,0,1,14,8,0,3,4,104,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3204067642941492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103774454189428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815689973523494,0.0,0.12728969291221445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378810476672651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17115213514669675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322694733593016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13901775623719093,0.0,0.0,0.17405968895995422,0.31284645164061303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950654144044848,0.0,0.08081469831939096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15271595519680975,0.15874784228189165,0.0,0.0,0.18329831956981024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363362901860222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17001781176111194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13960609086821188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644019525939098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144733486151069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14622401283127773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909292829054164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816324522012332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15479320685555195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16919645269121908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243271286426047,0.13519844687708418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027635138917164,0.0,0.0,0.12279983110490705,0.0,0.17778362707056106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501858339699426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260997259358073,0.0,0.0,0.2197625959136899,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mortalscumbro,2020/01/07,"Studying Hi guys, I have a really really important exam that i NEED to pass or it will completely destroy my mental health and most likely drive me to suicide. i‘ve been having such trouble concentrating on studying, always getting distracted no matter what I do.
I figured I could maybe ask my psychiatrist for medication to improve my concentration and I wanted to know if anyone here thinks this is a very fucking dumb idea, i am very very desperate. I don‘t know what to do anymore.",8.350909090909093,8.710164090909098,8.705818181818184,63.99372727272727,61.5,11.585454545454546,38.054545454545455,11.20814326018867,4.689992727272727,392,18,60,10,5,130,66,88,0.231,0.703,0.066,-0.9514,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,3,1,2,0,10,3,0,0,0,14,18,4,1,4,2,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,1,0,12,1,7,15,1,3,0,0,0,1,3,1,2,3,1,44,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16967837612660125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20223456070305712,0.14258610994153398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19063834742989286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21380699685232102,0.0,0.0,0.16281410302417004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885214211922342,0.10654016052298736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20191357476249566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167581913068869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302016733803393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22413899121677036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962536414435076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048657736635337,0.0,0.0,0.2054286734724748,0.2055041247156749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15120463120254676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612736719016869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22305617176717524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13066416444881074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5047678548976614,0.1202777250083489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emmanuellerosehill,2020/01/07,"I constantly feel stressed because my mind shoots a million ideas to me at once. I’m currently recovering from my depression so having all these thoughts and wants and ideas is great to me, but it’s overwhelming. Hundreds of ideas and thoughts will come into my head so much. I’m an artist and musician so a lot of it is art related, projects, work, organization, then it goes to books I wanna read places I wanna go things I wanna try and it’s great because I no longer feel that lack of wanting to do anything however, it’s kind of the same in that there’s just this overflow of SO much that I get anxious and just end up making thousands of lists and don’t even know where to get started and end up not doing it at all because I have this feeling that I can’t just do one thing at a time. Has anyone else experienced this/ how do you cope? And how would one describe this feeling in more detail but simpler than this post besides just “overwhelmed”? I’m in therapy currently but I’m just looking for answers here to get some extra input. Thanks!",3.595579751131221,5.3852143894230755,4.272149321266969,86.22579185520365,73.375,7.2018099547511305,29.062217194570128,7.928766900206844,1.859827714932126,835,35,166,12,17,266,120,208,0.06,0.8540000000000001,0.087,0.7634,3,0,0,1,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,1,15,8,0,3,5,0,13,1,1,3,2,47,35,19,0,7,9,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,18,11,0,0,11,4,0,2,4,4,0,4,2,6,14,4,27,31,10,23,0,3,1,0,1,12,0,2,8,121,32,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14356823333524413,0.0,0.08885976973766557,0.13021211023403312,0.10457892959068156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324068490677289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947122155976473,0.0,0.13733216525027234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945687137947932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616199512282053,0.0,0.2251166015438454,0.0,0.0,0.08393748314014292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570290358181763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991877217725168,0.0,0.07222450745519145,0.0,0.0,0.2802201147517831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042438111717294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4303855620618984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13233795632330245,0.0698417929941479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067181712724284,0.0,0.0,0.10804188569301937,0.0,0.0,0.0848292533308495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831815334162472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18684205648235985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13533982822327287,0.1722301985336649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277525652099004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171090729412153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711793594695098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899503874833561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455737718104792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700145433145145,0.14533110953108727,0.0,0.16885732124728198,0.0,0.0,0.20178027925205785,0.07410343726349401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628138529929237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991433531912174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251833456141988,0.0,0.0,0.09027650440076526,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mikael-9000,2020/01/07,"I always ruin my own life This won’t be interesting to anyone, and is just here for me to feel heard. Sorry for taking up space.

I think I have finally made the worst mistake I’ll ever make. I told my friends (who are wonderful people) that I don’t think I should be their friend anymore.    
Why did I say this?    
Well, that’s because I suck as a friend, and they deserve better. Now, they’re telling me that they think I’ll get better, but they don’t know me as well as I do. I will never get better.

I wish I could be just slightly more normal. Then, maybe, I could be a better friend, and I might not feel so bad about everything either.

I really think they’re better off without me, but I know they’re kind people. They would never tell me to fuck off (which they should’ve done ages ago), so I have to end it instead.    
That they pushed back proves that I can never be deserving of their friendship. If I was my own friend, I would’ve just said “okay”, and then it’d be over.    
I really suck.

I know I’ll be really sad when I’m friendless again. I feel like I’m going to cry whenever I think about it, but there’s an upside to all that: I promised them to not kill myself, and (imo) that our friendship ends makes my promise not count.    
I’ve got some painkillers and a cutting-tool, plus a belt and a plastic bag. I desperately hope that’ll be enough to kill me. If it doesn’t, I’ll jump off a nearby bridge into traffic. It’s more messy, but it might work.

That’ll be the last time anyone had to deal with my shit. After that, they can move on. I won’t hold anyone back anymore.

But, I’ll probably wuss out, and then live the rest of my shitty life without friends because I’m too retarded to just shut up. Thanks for reading, etc.",2.5349761241543938,3.805872317548747,3.5440618782331867,92.48977367688023,75.12813370473538,6.465618782331876,21.735077596498208,6.868970318607317,0.32083199363310744,1338,32,302,12,28,430,174,359,0.152,0.637,0.21100000000000002,0.9666,0,0,0,0,0,2,55.0,1,0,10,6,21,32,6,0,10,1,35,4,1,3,6,62,67,25,2,10,17,0,3,1,6,9,2,3,0,0,20,12,0,1,13,1,0,4,13,11,2,0,9,6,51,21,34,37,11,35,0,2,0,1,25,11,4,7,21,200,71,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369529661255207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06917604538353843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16489770197796458,0.17439246127069813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785333619923128,0.06941532171205039,0.10135821004448987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36763642104632815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327551104269952,0.0,0.09132130048090978,0.0,0.08570985481629145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507727937328599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472681369459121,0.08590200160800039,0.09271892897341337,0.0,0.07520152546171792,0.0,0.0,0.07471752836197981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261086043400087,0.05939257548558236,0.0,0.091071731748752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3853853050663763,0.0768581517920281,0.086870550599903,0.0,0.04724826415208015,0.0,0.06649167825473203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257308522492415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18395595368023948,0.08657364290907875,0.13706857687979454,0.06776716475599581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744322726613342,0.04061618733467304,0.0,0.07341085891378901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866555887280759,0.1109882257538776,0.0,0.08352156815732598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638891163841142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836070936680894,0.0,0.0,0.192359474407356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145590350282708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527245829443868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963497171018743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315877847716678,0.0,0.15977769057186272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908164088530775,0.06611330719414789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533819735488353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306425968535473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250813658765828,0.0,0.1453295472816974,0.07654071748235376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663518586236636,0.0,0.0,0.048477433793160433,0.0,0.0,0.0794402788584297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949900108469494,0.0,0.07501756223733846,0.0,0.09560261981121826,0.1602808155831245,0.0901577499749382,0.06052420243890892,0.0,0.0,0.1181152569105458,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,early-riser-,2020/01/08,Racing thoughts. (In need of advice) I’ve (19F) been dealing with racing thoughts. I don’t know how to exactly describe it but it feels like my thoughts are running at 1000 mph and I can’t stop them. It happens a couple of times a week and the only way I can get rid of them is by taking some time out. I haven’t noticed a specific trigger but I don’t know if it’s worth bringing up to my doctor. Just need some general advice,-0.2006666666666668,2.075005711111114,1.8883333333333359,94.8825,91.88888888888887,4.333333333333334,21.94444444444445,5.985473137389443,0.28144444444444483,334,13,72,3,12,111,62,90,0.034,0.897,0.069,0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,8,1,0,2,1,23,20,6,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,6,0,1,2,4,0,0,0,4,1,9,1,11,16,2,11,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,3,5,45,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3983867243852384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255487893485704,0.0,0.0,0.21015354287260665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20864230606315406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306932244674688,0.14562572979940933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649973692636328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18025800099105235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22405394812950444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958756416813586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30229452191682266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23207700476803975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550320530267209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704221679015672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532648304027262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4854865505624152,0.2377253930213972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16180136291371014,0.16351083953732462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cryonicfalcon,2020/01/08,"I cry weirdly I'm a high school student, and about 2 hours ago I started crying because the pressure of my schoolwork just reached the point of crying, you should also know that I don't cry very often (maybe like once every couple months) and I find that every time that I cry, it's like I just can't stop crying. I stopped feeling sorry about myself like 30 minutes after it started, and I am still crying, but it's only the physical effects of it, stuffy nose, eyes watering, difficulty speaking without voice cracking, etc. Is there some kind of medical explanation for this? Because at this point it's starting to interfere with my schoolwork because some of the tear drops started to wash some of the lead off of the paper.",9.93391304347826,7.710425000000002,9.113333333333337,70.69000000000003,59.8695652173913,10.93913043478261,41.84057971014492,8.841846274778883,3.88596231884058,582,26,100,6,6,184,87,138,0.16,0.7609999999999999,0.08,-0.8728,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,2,8,6,0,1,7,0,5,5,2,2,0,21,12,5,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,1,2,2,0,0,10,4,1,3,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,5,12,4,17,11,4,19,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,4,15,65,22,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884961343392861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015548795039856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18330147637822228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090479292755694,0.7707009583080152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178516643479423,0.0,0.0,0.16889955279960606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05068030689127044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161022501616277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590060287870122,0.0,0.0,0.09870832212078104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437619576292588,0.05508488162067311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14690486542791414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006965082614239,0.0,0.0,0.1009731872022141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000421990593343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674380047582537,0.0,0.07623094669548706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18950326094605285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144012723818806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122015091550653,0.2837788798846858,0.0,0.0800453984467413,0.16759686714326805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844608069679106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270189070931679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662006369487797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emmal99,2020/01/08,"What’s going on Got this strong impulse to just end my life right now. Not even feeling depressed?? Just got this urge to do it, never felt like this before. In the past I’ve felt shitty when I’ve wanted to do it, don’t know why it’s different this time.",2.677222222222224,3.675885425925927,3.660185185185188,92.86583333333336,74.37037037037038,6.140740740740743,20.907407407407405,5.985473137389443,-0.023725925925925928,199,4,45,1,4,64,39,54,0.128,0.758,0.113,0.2161,1,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,9,11,1,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,4,3,1,2,5,7,0,10,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,7,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21697481417990072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21961958315330607,0.0,0.0,0.266406723695923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258424417254864,0.0,0.0,0.16841624309053538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128928885398571,0.0,0.4896542424837559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14491475976661014,0.0,0.4078721516519041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013396574141349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18010457496074844,0.12457357187334142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19666138374134068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24341356004996145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177571614009084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14868473579527908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15039770192839172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300857439949361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,livimeow,2020/01/08,Is it too late to stop medication or has it permanently changed me? In third grade i was given adhd and anxiety meds. In ninth grade i was given antipsychotic meds. I wish to discontinue these meds. I dont want to have to spend money on pills i didnt agree to take forever. I was in third grade. They didnt explain to me what they were or why i was taking them. They didnt explain the mental physical or financial consequences it would cost me. I didnt need them but now that they made me take them i have ro forever. Is it too late to stop?,1.1094345238095258,3.3410648839285737,3.2214285714285715,88.59023809523809,83.19642857142857,7.3047619047619055,20.94047619047619,8.344100000000001,1.1741940476190482,425,13,94,10,12,144,59,112,0.086,0.8959999999999999,0.018000000000000002,-0.6028,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,7,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,16,2,0,1,0,14,27,5,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,1,0,2,2,0,3,0,5,0,0,2,12,0,20,0,11,14,0,9,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,3,5,65,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029539671711902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129188298225991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17864650816085398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19791930079159514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3809948989792415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597928480994301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5627434876243187,0.17012298668167944,0.17018547061162492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252180770359974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823727802095187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38091713773546176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960637657741447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238269579654914,0.0,0.194196991978433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996338407923135,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stormcloackulfric289,2020/01/08,"I don't know what's wrong with me When I was younger I used to be the happiest kid ever, even though I went through a lot. I always had a goofy smile on my face and would laugh all the time. I'm 15 now and I feel like I don't even know who that person is anymore. I'm often in deep rage, I'm unresponsive to my family members, and emotionally disconnected from myself. I go to school and feel numb and uncomfortable, and when I'm with friends I feel like I'm living a life that's not even mine. Sometimes I'm in such a terrible mental state that I pick up knives around my house and imagine someone killing me with it. Afterwards I have these internal monologues that I feel like are trying to guide me around my emotions. Sometimes I have good days where it feels like nothing was really wrong, but I find myself doing the same things over and over, almost as if I'm caught some sort of vicious cycle. I stayed home sick today so no one else was home, and I started to bang tables and punch the wall as hard as I could. It felt like something was urging me to do these things, then I stopped and reflected and wondered what the fuck I was doing. I really think I need a diagnosis, because I do things like this all the time. My mother who passed away was bipolar, and she often had a lot of strange emotional outbursts. I think I might be bipolar as well, but honestly I don't know anymore. Sorry for writing so much, but if you take the time to read this some guidance or anything really would be appreciated.",6.010321207430343,5.638532625,6.3281965944272445,81.54296439628484,66.5,9.389783281733747,31.04024767801857,8.841846274778883,2.2467057275541804,1194,40,247,17,17,385,161,304,0.107,0.754,0.139,0.6812,0,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,0,0,17,19,4,0,13,0,26,7,1,2,3,61,53,29,1,6,7,1,7,6,1,3,5,0,2,2,18,18,0,1,15,1,0,4,5,8,1,1,11,7,39,11,28,35,8,31,0,0,0,1,9,12,1,13,19,170,57,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941922417645305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826939263264666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18657387696530228,0.0,0.0,0.0774072598388383,0.1674751092362632,0.0,0.0,0.08837691240670792,0.0,0.0,0.05734098772580525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510303461545867,0.0,0.0,0.06066397054495441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857901370424705,0.31743048917327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863866055928564,0.08508693566252687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867585805483286,0.0,0.2378097748702295,0.2687994541677785,0.09031689431684592,0.0,0.08597346118540293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267417882845735,0.086961329261839,0.0,0.0,0.05345915508217512,0.07889703457261958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842635239341588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18870919210972945,0.0,0.0,0.10853807168824947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406868942769816,0.0,0.15508655058150694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644070224000971,0.2757316608181089,0.0,0.08306088195655217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15994094321009036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479512588568363,0.09978781603174276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691484014588807,0.06974780710204644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902576475706989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374069701311054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08213369598847793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409018754098257,0.0,0.1807808285074733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519853095236937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970074241647351,0.07241562650273159,0.18606485092465613,0.1052977666039433,0.06657950166233821,0.10026048890868958,0.0,0.07864232813310265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072497218059788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187477285232845,0.1205457645661349,0.09241812188074408,0.0,0.1645497055379342,0.0,0.08916236750906728,0.0,0.0,0.0638637786527159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812417270533925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457549104759139,0.08719894922568902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200918963407037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364177393750518,0.2056900364568856,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Similar-Goo,2020/01/08,"I think I need help. I’ve never been that self-confident. I always considered myself skinny, (I was 60lbs at 7), but when someone called me fat for the first time I crumbled. Also, I can’t control my emotions. One second I’m in the middle of joking with my friends, and then some random guy calls me a name. The problem is, my brain seems to view this person as a better version of me. I get scared that my friends will see that too and leave me, and then I pretty much accept it. Thus, I cry. I cry like a little 5 year old who doesn’t want to be left out. I want to be a man but I’m not viewed as that by anyone. Whenever someone I trust insults me, it feels like they’ve sided with that better version.

I don’t know what to do.",0.7838279569892492,2.617178006451613,2.6761290322580638,94.28086021505376,81.83870967741936,4.907526881720432,19.365591397849464,5.6839178017228535,-0.25946021505376304,561,14,126,3,15,187,100,155,0.11900000000000001,0.64,0.24100000000000002,0.9640000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,4,3,12,1,1,7,0,10,3,3,2,1,24,21,11,0,4,3,0,1,2,2,1,1,0,0,3,10,6,2,1,5,1,0,0,5,3,0,3,2,4,23,9,15,16,4,15,0,0,3,0,11,7,0,3,10,82,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223743670723927,0.12718692700848305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687920035270952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703742105524074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063582263573315,0.31216242649349385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714389661955437,0.0,0.0,0.3358062900007628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17194038477780782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728766880888695,0.10919906047315288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001769187476864,0.0,0.0,0.2361895286817659,0.0,0.079860002961125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151349675082807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245493833466572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400466272252688,0.0,0.0,0.16185051176118356,0.166076519502466,0.0,0.0,0.14935366788478574,0.15320004984014482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236541377523844,0.11333944154294588,0.11789057081437106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16039475456191554,0.0,0.10357795181222408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346637868589065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555076584548992,0.0,0.14626081186067544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303370504782854,0.0,0.12180499553372642,0.13915270943567185,0.15946025145856493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590257102370247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794278991670473,0.0,0.0,0.08913050463096422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18031471753323747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843308376962304
mentalhealth,spicklesandwich,2020/01/08,"How to find a doctor experienced in executive function? I don't know if it's me. I don't think it's ADD based. But the symptoms and experiences (e.g. as described by ""How to ADHD"" youtube channel, ""ADHD Alien"" cartoonist, wikipedia, etc.) are 90% spot on. Like it hurts true. Like an epiphany, ""OMG it's real, and SOMEONE can describe it."" kinda thing.

I'm hoping for an expert opinion, or at least a very informed direction to go.

I really need someone to just call and set an appointment with... but I can't afford anything, I'm broke and can't work, and I can't even manage to get my health insurance in order.

I need help.

I just don't want to feel like a broken, worthless piece of shit any more. I want to feel human again. I at least want to be able to describe why I can't do the thing, for once in my life.

What do I do?",1.4757352941176478,3.3774836764705896,3.3384558823529424,90.05180147058823,79.88235294117645,6.132352941176473,23.56617647058824,7.1686216300943375,0.8360882352941177,635,22,138,8,16,213,101,170,0.138,0.779,0.084,-0.8762,1,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,0,1,6,9,1,0,8,0,13,5,1,2,1,31,27,12,0,7,6,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,6,1,0,1,7,4,0,0,0,3,14,5,21,26,5,10,0,3,0,0,4,6,1,5,4,84,22,3,0.1588175548263295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817356759459024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080013833679168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069331548940488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16217048034481624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16255649704076255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17712355515600947,0.10489749711875793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535404331961675,0.0,0.0,0.16060585530756696,0.11345929290117772,0.0,0.0,0.14515636788866595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297561744391435,0.0,0.09025967635979028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16881563413671055,0.0,0.0,0.10645205926971202,0.0,0.0,0.15774166696244454,0.0,0.0,0.17001747718438354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728197469467322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217753576692836,0.23277070531075594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355224090675863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16913551264577245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18076914698000265,0.10174259237765827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163023937759639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691311976438073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650722496202145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21102265288851474,0.10176387636091416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104111545159772,0.2810241259725835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330814074033008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562107142151674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MegabusFanclub,2020/01/08,"Waking up with intense fear and anxiety Since around the age of 8, I've intermittently suffered from this odd thing. I will wake up at night and feel intensely afraid of something. When I was younger the only way I could explain it was by saying that something was growing and multiplying inside of me. More recently I would say it feels as if I have been asked to build a house with an infinite amount of rooms. 

It is very hard to describe so googling it is never any help.

Also worth saying the sleep one are about every two months. As I've had it for over 10 years it doesn't effect me day to day but it is still immensely scary when it happens.

I have more frequent momentary flashes of the feeling in the day time, often in relation to numbers. The most recent one was when reading that a woman had 2500 personalities (in no way implying I have D.I.D, just the most recent time I've had it).

If anyone has any experience of this I would be really interested in hearing / any advice on what on earth it is!",5.850303030303032,6.1630012525252535,6.459141414141418,78.14204545454548,66.77777777777779,9.42828282828283,31.146464646464647,9.2995712137729,2.5917797979797985,800,29,155,14,12,262,124,198,0.08900000000000001,0.863,0.049,-0.7832,0,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,10,4,0,2,10,0,23,3,3,1,1,22,30,13,0,5,4,0,4,0,0,3,0,4,1,2,16,6,0,0,5,1,1,1,3,3,0,4,8,8,10,1,29,17,5,34,0,1,0,0,9,12,0,5,19,112,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294338716733069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592452552022358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702226167440997,0.0,0.10132800888282656,0.0,0.0,0.0926158866735398,0.0,0.0,0.11791337703820501,0.12382790713932505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575484891707636,0.0,0.0,0.2562683015089953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159937671358944,0.0,0.0,0.12956678516050016,0.0,0.14904913571496325,0.20092027126074447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712986171598044,0.0,0.11865401030071265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14928684826456118,0.0,0.08878205419420834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15283573336168485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572462659569508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215776044722166,0.0,0.0,0.12430040838450045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951039706997804,0.1007382908538176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565493531302255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249123179808045,0.0,0.08485431293955788,0.0,0.3923511468254397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3160015215039261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956846528719423,0.0,0.1325510451858595,0.0,0.0,0.2039412569477048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577904354839816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799747385574655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15447160324581385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293896670562978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928956652887804,0.0,0.21027384259609944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18818501388307207,0.0,0.0,0.08529692682251945
mentalhealth,NationalFact,2020/01/08,"I was framed for assaulting a federal officer and the fed used my PTSD disability to make his false accusations more believable. I was later exonerated of the crime by the high federal court and released from federal prison. I’m now filing a federal civil rights lawsuit.  I’m on social security disability for ptsd. 
I made this video to help us protect ourselves. Thank you

https://youtu.be/HrSFkt35gls",7.232549019607843,10.29606147058824,7.918235294117648,58.478725490196105,66.64705882352942,12.180392156862744,36.333333333333336,11.538034831475384,5.701550980392157,332,17,47,13,6,110,51,68,0.183,0.6509999999999999,0.166,-0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,5,0,2,1,0,3,0,5,9,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,7,2,8,5,1,5,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,27,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963811031542736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632509933145246,0.27793973904468744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24891588732161515,0.17559611278200649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6150114494307355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246537474307649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681588634511462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24219240136789955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31643152953789666,0.22720134536197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LikMiVisi,2020/01/08,Is it normal to feel sad and good at same time? I am currently going through heartbreak and i am sad but i dont feel like it is end of the world.Its weird..I am sad but i know i will get better and i feel good at the same time..Is this hope?,-2.927281746031745,-1.3413894821428585,-0.09904761904761727,106.8551587301587,104.53571428571428,3.203174603174604,11.579365079365079,5.033348758259628,-1.772323015873016,183,3,51,1,9,62,33,56,0.205,0.5710000000000001,0.225,0.5118,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,0,9,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,13,14,5,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,3,6,5,5,13,2,6,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,1,4,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24521076395144256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32494244803229305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455668855076664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.420567515088051,0.19807203495254494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485503107158354,0.0,0.15757120737843236,0.4650990453207052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753781746134406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15237287224686208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354534773348125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716524150332508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3233408850242388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pikachu134,2020/01/08,"Mental Health Awareness Project/Documentary (non profitable) Hello everyone. I am 16 and I have decided to make a special project to help people in my school, especially younger people. 
In my country, mental health is not talked about at all, and even when it is talked about, not a single time has my school offered something which truly would show students how it’s okay to not be okay and that people with mental health disorders don’t have to be treated different or judged since we’re all humans and we should all get treated without prejudice. 
I decided because of this to make a documentary as a school project where I’m going to interview people from my country, as well as all over the world that have mental disorders and just have a normal conversation with them and try to humanize the idea of having a disorder. This would then closely related to something I am looking to implement in my school which would help students feel more comfortable about reaching out for help when they need it. 

What I need is people from all over the world who are willing to be interviewed by me about their lives, their disorder, but mainly just about them. I truly believe that if students here see that a mental disorder isn’t something to be ashamed of or even struggling with mental health isn’t something that should stay hidden. I hope this project will help someone out there and I’d really appreciate all the help I could get. 

If you have any questions, which I’m sure I do since I feel I wasn’t very clear about some things, you can leave a comment and I’ll try to reply.

If you are interested in being a part of this, here’s the discord link. 
https://discord.gg/GRz5m6g 

I am not exactly sure when the interviews will start, but more information about all this will be on the discord server so if this peeks your interest please do join. 

Disclaimer: If you feel like you can’t handle talking about some personal stuff, it’s best if you do not apply, you do not have to force yourself to participate, I understand how scary it actually can be to open up. 

Thank you to everyone who actually took the time to read this. 
Hope together we can make a difference!",7.272310231023098,7.765646544554457,6.893316831683168,75.6229290429043,63.75247524752476,10.297689768976898,34.65511551155116,10.125756701596842,3.458023432343236,1740,72,311,36,24,545,184,404,0.064,0.7559999999999999,0.18,0.993,1,0,4,0,0,0,37.0,2,9,5,1,23,20,1,2,18,2,45,4,0,5,11,75,66,28,0,17,19,0,3,1,0,9,4,0,0,3,25,17,0,0,10,2,1,2,12,3,1,0,2,5,35,17,51,47,15,26,0,0,2,0,38,16,0,13,8,229,60,15,0.0,0.0,0.13450624254150512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04686597250995708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042011207679622735,0.0,0.0,0.07764594057985083,0.07232421565505683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055024674490913986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400734484704242,0.3949246784191171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910381527166884,0.0,0.0,0.13170643213938893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453962761950908,0.049234370304235935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201265178013272,0.0,0.03916716044854072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930225010822342,0.0,0.0,0.23096830465435894,0.0,0.0,0.13690040621707136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779898614272049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297322884878962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03366940044664241,0.0,0.06085503756258043,0.0,0.05787298362117953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800804296245026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.416713197161116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220227190274438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675240984876609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07463047350679249,0.0,0.23889210272274236,0.06017572937820345,0.0,0.07565025010427988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720289351883007,0.0,0.06893572235449942,0.0,0.04415004131215208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27899102636734824,0.054917983992066315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140178289436971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05839321181368025,0.2122229173172845,0.0,0.0,0.048779858570233536,0.07345642948713818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204708758981426,0.07889355965114597,0.0,0.0,0.12990705030396246,0.0,0.0,0.16617879682690245,0.0,0.06344958097991395,0.0,0.0,0.04578544061588953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037219828431014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656940324207119,0.09358033666996887,0.0,0.0,0.07174510287610103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056863802322860466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061964724709606275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643359849751028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146870132750653,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lilchipsahoy,2020/01/08,"normal anxiety fears or becoming schizo? so i have anxiety, and my diagnosis changed at my last doctor visit to panic disorder, which i'm not sure about i don't really understand my brain. but my mind is flooded with all these horrible fears everyday. one time at my counselling center i didn't want to drink the coffee because i was worried someone there put drugs in it. and the one time i didn't wanna eat the pizza my friend had because she's a huge stoner and i thought she made it herbal(my anxiety started the day my stoner lifestyle decided to cut me off, giving me panic attacks for months every time i smoked). i can get past these fears, like i ended up eating the pizza, but i was so anxious while eating it that i only finished half. i get worried when i leave my water in a room that a ghost or some shit drugged it, even though that's so bizarre. i'll still drink it though. and i have a huge fear of walking alone. the only job i can handle with these problems is being a dog sitter/walker and i always ask a friend to come with me because i think every car that slows down near me is gonna kidnap me or put me into sex trafficking. my fears have taken over my life and i'm really starting to believe that this is more than anxiety and more like paranoia similar to schizophrenia. the only illnesses i know of in my family are bipolar on my dads side, but i'm unsure of any history of schizophrenia. i've also heard stories of acid bringing out psychosis, and i did that twice, which i think kind of kick started the panic attacks with smoking. am i developing schizophrenia? or is my anxiety just really, really bad?",6.0627889818002965,6.223770074766357,6.732280701754387,76.88684210526318,66.32087227414331,9.49932775864896,32.4710608296442,9.276330184999452,2.871731464174455,1298,50,238,22,19,428,172,321,0.275,0.659,0.066,-0.9971,1,1,5,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,0,12,20,4,8,14,0,20,17,2,1,2,39,42,23,1,4,9,1,0,2,2,1,6,1,1,0,17,15,8,0,6,2,0,7,4,14,0,4,10,2,42,6,33,30,4,42,0,0,0,1,9,18,1,5,19,162,59,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176847514227445,0.0,0.06313635227483337,0.06569279301555851,0.0,0.0,0.053688763263566815,0.0,0.3019829842387233,0.0891911207280726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380766945338949,0.1796342323931626,0.0,0.0,0.06592002095602993,0.1443817121077727,0.08719416308448423,0.0,0.0889497069816039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881344021834974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351871864411392,0.06800850516553412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091627169276616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048363420637208,0.08080875461423767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546820480468466,0.18311406090340387,0.24235693224394905,0.0,0.0,0.06992633927348586,0.0,0.0,0.052145784749482005,0.0,0.1330376988187834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442711119548645,0.4442039599678306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199327544959628,0.0,0.08249631889285547,0.07573611293169873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834577446460833,0.0,0.0,0.08221436152784709,0.04338890049764857,0.06435485438469812,0.0,0.08359673764175854,0.0,0.0,0.05576477794515016,0.07714204455789155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470447678575066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971707696347771,0.0,0.06301720244757282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735431794399597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699723799321137,0.1801352856009799,0.0,0.2778927324275564,0.0,0.0,0.07536678692355726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755445662997271,0.0,0.15873327769937495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20230977736192066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104112491647737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689414851250383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16764382377327974,0.0,0.06304963769218412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07440951821234372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117604971987844,0.15513610997579252,0.06267754651995311,0.13810928363031408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218981997688968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04656680405439709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603552817655316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ryavsart,2020/01/08,"bipolar 1 and hypomania? i got diagnosed with bipolar disorder last year. initially, it was bipolar 2, but my psych changed it to 1 a few months ago. just curious if people with bipolar 1 still experience hypomanic episodes aside from the manic ones? cos sometimes i feel really good and restless, but it's not as intense as full blown mania.",4.55182795698925,7.321058806451617,5.75935483870968,72.17569892473121,73.83870967741936,9.29462365591398,36.13978494623656,9.725611199111238,4.375959139784946,274,16,44,8,6,91,50,62,0.098,0.7829999999999999,0.11900000000000001,0.5221,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,1,5,0,1,0,11,3,7,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,3,1,6,1,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,5,26,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615488153868521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3121294973042209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29947502690072597,0.0,0.0,0.3381590584434135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886208044151465,0.0,0.0,0.14918887903447114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24747847630435116,0.2359827625369351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405095369551365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355104106097952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19993717965232966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045542680433801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890200488371462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918173417420831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23563162890384734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19000600812283375
mentalhealth,a95z,2020/01/08,"I can't afford therapy, can someone recommend self help books/articles? (UK) I (26F) currently can't afford therapy but I'd like to try addressing my issues on my own. 

I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety in the past but the last two years were quite good for me. 

Currently, I'm struggling with bouts of rage and fear and lack of sleep that's triggered by particular repetitive sounds (potentially misophonia?). And I've got the feeling that I've become overly emotional in the last few months, to the point that I'm getting anxious about feeling emotions and can't tell whether my reactions are proportional to given situations. 

Can anyone recommend some self help reading material that covers these topics?",8.169765625,9.3146201953125,8.257812500000004,64.35593750000001,61.890625,12.65,39.4375,12.161744961471696,5.5642625,587,30,90,20,8,191,87,128,0.19,0.654,0.156,-0.8462,4,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,1,6,1,2,5,0,9,2,1,1,0,15,16,8,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,1,2,5,7,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,3,7,2,14,12,4,13,0,1,0,0,5,5,0,1,9,53,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959035246411424,0.1766059367786693,0.0,0.1093080447665076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726517923248902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464492010357432,0.1586694440409144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35169550697310586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759122563558542,0.1580880832600028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167483242689498,0.0,0.0,0.13112035635719582,0.12502963643571793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20956648158065125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631656261797207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.254856072041423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637387518486613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247793724372584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14923259062091646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14778031710992784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662738766335353,0.1563701219813717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.326168014868938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17571901669687798,0.15644071553398795,0.0,0.1324560524256736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16342777721087445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663740288210394,0.0,0.35754896672564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613632642369608,0.0,0.15270956233207503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006699890314307
mentalhealth,odmejsss11,2020/01/08,"grandmom lacks empath and understanding my grandmom today: oh I thought my router was wired cuz I hooked an internet cord into it

plus my mom and I get headaches from wireless. plus my grandma lives next door to us  
plus even when I showed her everything that meant the router was wireless she STILL thought it was wired. for example, even when the settings online showed it was wireless she still thought it was wired.

grandmom a few months ago: I have a  SPECIAL engine that does not run on gas

almost runs out of gas in town.

 does not care for my mom's health fully despite her being able to do something about it like for example the router. for a lot of diff things excluding daily things she has to do she lacks understanding.

is this just her being a idot and being 70? or a mental illness?  
i really want to know.",3.3333333333333366,5.75316925477707,3.4486878980891724,88.97948619957536,76.19745222929936,6.224883227176223,25.11634819532909,7.3011,1.1575744373673036,651,23,125,8,15,199,92,157,0.035,0.914,0.051,0.3732,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,9,0,13,2,0,1,0,25,23,10,0,3,4,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,10,8,0,0,7,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,9,0,19,3,19,11,4,16,0,0,0,0,10,5,0,3,9,88,29,0,0.1597584228867931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161620261748958,0.0,0.1599749834647496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16288435947382882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27961134492249234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21103786319831225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358056920807513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346718217260944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698157328880093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877990511748785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804989571284637,0.0,0.14106961431902793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582089812308545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609989146878087,0.0,0.0,0.3742142680766577,0.1275176489639781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990489515989635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234533654949483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298983902861475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551665657715215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21227279475321106,0.0,0.0,0.3804910277493265,0.0,0.0,0.15143230483460254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33262830481708405,0.19216971219702336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422965701664013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,youtwo224,2020/01/08,2020 positive [https://www.reddit.com/r/motivation/comments/elnr13/do\_these\_things\_in\_2020/?utm\_source=share&utm\_medium=web2x](https://www.reddit.com/r/motivation/comments/elnr13/do_these_things_in_2020/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=web2x),368.68,450.54202533333336,146.26166666666668,-950.8875,-537.6666666666666,27.26666666666667,68.16666666666667,8.841846274778883,19.832466666666672,248,2,1,2,2,41,3,3,0.0,0.336,0.664,0.6072,0,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,screenUWU,2020/01/08,"What is happening to me? I get anxious randomly around everyone and start acting strange. I don't know why this is happening to me and since people notice that and get anxious too I get even more nervous.
I can't handle it anymore, it's horrific and I hate it because it's hurting my boundaries with everyone.

Somebody please help me out and tell me why's that happening.",2.6295833333333327,5.329435013888889,3.9811111111111153,82.55000000000003,80.80555555555556,7.488888888888887,31.222222222222207,8.472884824447931,2.986188888888889,299,16,53,7,8,98,45,72,0.247,0.688,0.065,-0.9184,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,10,13,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,10,0,5,13,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,35,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4000679339011543,0.17560170577253453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762611215823447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793767508198336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695029839339932,0.0,0.0,0.33838794130557864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775287347930548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4697361363996777,0.0,0.0,0.17481583057651082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868348090412535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18955261312189126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973107392004858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015905997100232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275513886665165,0.0,0.0,0.1943650889042918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647066882639606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532809256642274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15476332353756234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195487076838525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BeniftsCabbagepatch,2020/01/08,"""It hurts, Doctor. The noise in my head, Doctor. 1 2 3 4. 1 2 3 4."" - [The Master to The Doctor] So, I'm pretty messed up...got lots of undiagnosed issues. My parents are emotionally abusive, don't have many friends, my family is toxic and anti LGBT, etc etc. 

Anywho...I told all this to my new (and first) psychiatrist a few weeks ago (prior to them I'd had about 6 therapists/councillors), and they said that I was right, all the assessments I'd made about my parents seemed to match up (they met my parents prior to meeting me) and that my identity as a trans girl and a pansexual is valid and that my parents seem to be gaslighting me as I had guessed, that my mood would likely improve after I leave home etc etc. 

The psychiatrist told me that they believed me. Nobody has ever told me that. 

The best way I can describe the feeling is when the Master presses his head against the Doctor's head to try and get him to hear the drums, and then he hears them and the master realizes he's not entirely insane (hence the title).

Obviously my parents have tried to make me doubt the psychiatrist to try and retain absolute control... But I'm gonna try and remember the facts and cling on to the truth.

Anyways...this was me telling you peeps that I hope you find someone to tell you that they believe you... even if it is their job.",2.76408728841686,4.694841950381684,4.120547626949886,85.8094673083306,76.06106870229006,6.999269830733489,25.131762363093266,7.893859768569023,1.3974123464985069,1029,36,208,16,23,339,145,262,0.071,0.852,0.076,0.3039,6,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,0,4,7,6,6,9,0,1,18,0,16,7,3,3,6,36,34,19,0,3,3,5,2,1,1,2,4,3,1,1,11,12,0,2,6,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,10,5,35,5,22,21,9,15,0,1,0,0,32,4,0,7,11,132,46,5,0.0,0.10063088059478964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075287354436024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913792229020782,0.0891312030332912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525879007353567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3477272087013383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553739958995323,0.0,0.0,0.37888783623463707,0.056096979414664266,0.07682612272167329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006660834973063,0.0,0.042944319962482866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762657837430723,0.07224336620192577,0.0,0.0,0.06561847994522177,0.0,0.04437361835621876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792811451901315,0.0,0.09356249759812872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614951109679384,0.0,0.19144973688824168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519401620732513,0.08435693212402412,0.0,0.0,0.09092177773267401,0.0,0.0,0.0886472492175964,0.08428219689244816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993103648074646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04149362893241475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220639946427274,0.0,0.08036499050817619,0.05669296600086145,0.08610801583865471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820281391474524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4715363091825976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640667708347033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962117329578972,0.07253171532828813,0.08079006124388742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546383419178706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196285740248064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846913764046732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24346934088704786,0.0,0.2306538110951931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741530199659801,0.06812756350516487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033346509261266,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chrono-Face,2020/01/08,"I can’t stop harming myself I just can’t stop from hurting myself. I try to keep myself from doing it, but i can’t help it, I’ve tried talking to my friends, and Trying to keep being optimistic, and nothing works. Every day, it keeps getting worse, i don’t know what to do about it. I hope someone has a solution.",2.7506153846153865,3.995307446153853,4.366153846153846,86.91384615384617,74.53846153846153,6.430769230769231,26.84615384615385,6.742157984588678,1.174446153846154,244,9,50,2,5,82,41,65,0.16,0.598,0.243,0.8381,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,0,0,11,14,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,10,2,7,13,0,3,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,35,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13510000328119967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649950545666554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184700259451934,0.0,0.10944686818747486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404128689618077,0.0,0.0,0.20806511555494836,0.0,0.0,0.22425720938496005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5585976477363724,0.0,0.0,0.11512705869296355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20100577613723275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749531501569665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502764060242353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16837549534487867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4266781399910863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525070201751595,0.0,0.21348233521344054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BannedTonight,2020/01/08,"I'm always angry and I don't know why I just always seem to have this weird feeling like I'm pissed off all the time but I don't really have anything to be pissed off at. My dad was seriously ill with cancer but he just recently beat it and I'm moving into a bigger house in a nicer part of my town next week, if anything my life is better now than it has been at any point since like April 2019.

I'm asking for advice and help here cause I can feel it getting worse to the point I'm making myself and my family sad by snapping at them. I've never struggled with my mental health before but recently I've just been feeling kinda low. I'd be grateful for any advice, thanks guys.",4.167083333333334,4.317767652777778,5.400000000000002,84.84500000000001,70.3888888888889,7.788888888888889,23.63888888888889,7.3871296695380915,0.8740888888888891,538,11,114,5,9,180,92,144,0.2,0.628,0.172,-0.7713,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,2,5,11,2,1,4,0,12,6,2,2,2,24,26,8,0,1,7,1,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,3,3,11,4,17,21,2,21,0,2,0,0,6,12,2,3,10,64,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950815440950883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512631919644479,0.0,0.0,0.20534992365193616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24849554256302456,0.0,0.14115057198072958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847709482106104,0.0,0.0,0.13353394245411426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15510316206047597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14233519895585636,0.0,0.2290276228206631,0.10786369770602744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888341878471596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949886501130635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16048997012905286,0.0,0.0,0.10120204742729487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742163917768826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297739473708321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664515438069894,0.14752726639046151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078364453609782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215734472668999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047313601588584,0.0,0.0,0.11644892215751852,0.0,0.1605742358805732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16350201666541408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28545921176281114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967248424296974,0.0,0.2981588995626245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745105242214187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248963331742092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578422802681564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390066813102456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804055425242084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111104124117684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13624045749246286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538665905262344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwAwayAc--,2020/01/08,"Pls give me a advice I don’t know

I don’t any further, I don’t know if I’m just weird or if I really have something like a mental disorder. I’m still in school and have a really hard time learning because  I can’t focus on homework or learning Spanish vocabulary it’s like: I’m sitting there learning reading and writing the vocabulary and 2 seconds later I’m reading a book and than 4 seconds after that switch I’m drawing something. It’s even when I’m eating (or when I’m supposed to eat) because when my mom calls me for dinner I’m just sitting there without hunger, and when I’m hungry than I don’t know what to eat and stuff, like one time I was on my own for an entire day and had a plan to learn as much as I could and eat a something but I endet Up playing on my phone for almost the Entire day and not eating Anything! I wasn’t even hungry after that! it’s the same with homework because when I’m supposed to do I’m like: „it’s not that many I can do it tomorrow before school!“ and it’s WAY to much and I regret it afterwards always I’m even supposed to learn right now help me pls",2.091019036954087,3.4498887446808566,4.0966629339305705,87.72105263157896,76.44680851063829,6.13885778275476,25.98544232922732,6.5966054737557815,0.9890851063829782,865,32,183,7,19,296,102,235,0.04,0.8640000000000001,0.096,0.8638,0,0,3,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,14,7,0,0,10,0,14,7,0,0,0,36,30,24,0,4,11,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,11,12,7,0,8,4,0,0,9,2,0,3,3,1,18,5,22,26,4,26,0,1,0,0,6,7,0,6,20,115,29,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062044151202334,0.0,0.0,0.11335622699579485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419377723559283,0.0,0.0,0.07698176884799478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931562382743717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20702208268039515,0.0,0.09632722369588838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559269004309353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038320439623317,0.0,0.0,0.14601284960922473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974018751011718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5791734993385944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243080956219009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859441687139962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140745105551748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587743383043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18663985379666528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212206309712933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147698459114067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408177156304745,0.0,0.0,0.1325817218368707,0.0,0.0,0.1664341297187578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670913001042062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264668184378825,0.0,0.14504119269900642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667455126960106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22913450369469016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26144708020881197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040388229734543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959009378008035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201889684063298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898550935921947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912343539204863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yellowyat,2020/01/08,"I’m afraid to seek help. Hi guys. I’m struggling with life right now. My depression and anxiety meds seem like they’ve stopped working. I’m also struggling so hard finishing tasks. Like cleaning my house, and making my bed, or even reading books. I can’t even get through 1 page until I’m fiddling around with something else. Which would be great but as much as I do, I don’t get anything done. I don’t know if that makes sense. 

I tried to see a therapist but I’m afraid I’ll get put in a ward for a few weeks or something and I can’t have that because I have a 1 year old... I’m so afraid of ever and I don’t know why..",0.3328038379530902,2.301778932835824,1.8801705756929648,98.63044776119403,84.29850746268656,5.0226012793177,21.51172707889127,6.1826913282559595,0.020865245202558842,483,16,116,4,14,156,81,134,0.09,0.841,0.069,-0.1238,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,8,9,0,5,4,0,11,1,0,2,1,20,26,15,0,2,5,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,3,7,0,1,3,2,0,1,5,6,0,0,1,2,11,3,12,23,3,12,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,4,10,59,14,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800085138312028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244634887207374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317166961321483,0.14248836684633046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757179716633778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378604420937883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16379813816424807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371056012052676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21143777248706253,0.14478448239623026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508760485946231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17646799335841146,0.0,0.1584857126344715,0.0,0.0,0.14338335965085838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728562123444484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468908778188625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17593085454480084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130559304899074,0.1563955950109691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136841336553924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17779186494274365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766336906830208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16795726165694308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16090567443545642,0.0,0.0,0.1601044742722473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13669135561040574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754802089293804,0.14571366808593336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464458008496426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13381829636391934,0.0,0.334661353720068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185843342833452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867102057564323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283914073699432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14443030048225727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652643039831635,0.0,0.0,0.11370285529378454,0.0,0.0,0.1030741388741144
mentalhealth,teddy0088,2020/01/08,"I can't believe this is where I ended up Have you ever took a hard look at your life, and feel depressed as to where you are in life?

Looking back on high school, I had so many plans and goals. Now at 21, almost 22...I haven't accomplished much. Just disappointed. 

Anyone else feel this way? How do you cope?",0.2260714285714301,2.5615205555555605,1.5288690476190467,98.12758928571432,89.4761904761905,4.419841269841268,15.811507936507935,5.985473137389443,-0.7175063492063485,237,5,54,2,8,75,50,63,0.168,0.8320000000000001,0.0,-0.8584,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,4,0,3,8,2,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,1,1,8,12,5,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,5,7,0,7,10,1,14,0,2,2,0,4,8,0,1,4,35,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22584251924302284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15770056950066272,0.23108909690417526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734238720894144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25410273240812803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942545091357352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840705011526626,0.0,0.1997586555328994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20401094129102934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280763580999433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020366663865868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382920043971055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3186066133062299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3787882060783146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286589084755545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16579549328639312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282552751240929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505796753490425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902060823206176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GFarth2000,2020/01/08,"I'm back where I thought I'd be gone from forever I finished my second year of sixth form last year and during the exam period I was offered a job as the photography departments teaching assistant/technician. This was brilliant for me as there isn't a lot near me so obviously I took up the offer and have been working there now for about 4 months.

While this all sounds great it's really hitting me now that I spent 7 years at this place where I battled with mental health troubles constantly (5 years of secondary school and 2 of sixth form) for it to take me nowhere but back to that same place where I struggled for so long.
I've been trying to keep an eye out for other opportunities but so far I've found nothing.
It's great that I've been employed there but even being at the other end of the stick, I feel like it's bringing back some of those problems that I tried so hard to get rid of when I was a student just from being back in the same location. So not only am I physically back, my mental health has rapidly started to go that way too

I could go on, but I'll spare some details for the sake of not writing too much of an essay. I'm just having a bit of a tough time with myself and figuring out what's best for me.

I just needed sonewhere to say this as i dont really have anyone I know personally to tell.

Thanks for your time guys, I appreciate it",6.758490086426026,5.38658643772242,7.187323335027963,79.2824288256228,65.40569395017796,10.306151499745807,32.52694458566345,9.23628265651192,2.533327198779869,1083,35,229,16,14,356,156,281,0.052000000000000005,0.8370000000000001,0.111,0.9645,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,3,26,11,1,1,14,0,17,3,1,0,2,34,36,18,0,3,9,0,2,1,0,0,2,2,0,2,18,8,0,1,5,0,1,6,4,5,0,1,11,5,25,6,40,20,11,44,0,0,1,0,8,14,0,3,24,161,43,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105737648422934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4456954130164197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165601706834844,0.0,0.1265599524869299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527361994015182,0.0,0.09255658949657627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358631043780825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267504168680673,0.0,0.0,0.07656729464993503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05861510609694191,0.08281676254393952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710565526460638,0.0,0.0,0.06056596891340305,0.0,0.1317655697165726,0.0,0.0,0.2556151946707255,0.0,0.11478386396480805,0.0,0.0,0.10384592891940944,0.0,0.0,0.2464454682999246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150375629943628,0.10303936612710053,0.0,0.0,0.06370928628077023,0.09449425531707607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05663504427000854,0.0,0.0,0.10258987718564502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855519354303488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23365004084858998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253013893641412,0.0,0.08521813054484377,0.08595683494394675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123305573338736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816610045421702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122114002937242,0.24223366743769725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092446100603012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485289022713078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218812314716693,0.0,0.1173221747316974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205223178797144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118986204226335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716108810773647,0.0,0.10132346096666793,0.1067280610893464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203141146276317,0.13519346788260772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879681505511584,0.1574107777328869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201577956153782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439469850505504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2986073063154519
mentalhealth,takeitawayladybird,2020/01/08,"need help getting help hi there i’m (f18) currently working on trying to better my mental health. in the last two months, i’ve lost the three people closest to me and my mental state is cripplingly awful to the point of me constantly thinking and threatening suicide. i’ve been suicidal for years, but it’s the worst at this point. i never stop thinking about it, 
i’m currently seeing a therapist, but she believes my suicidal thoughts are a teenage coping mechanism compared to life threatening thoughts. my parents feel the same.
the only person who’s felt alarm was my medical doctor who diagnosed me with generalized depression and diagnosed me with 20mg of lexapro.
my question is... how do i get real help despite my family and therapist seeing my suicidal thoughts as silly? i can’t keep living this way. thanks",5.195467217346412,7.702195134228193,5.748456375838928,74.26328342798142,70.81208053691276,9.416830149716057,33.609189468249866,9.851270322608157,3.969087351574601,661,33,104,18,13,213,97,149,0.239,0.667,0.094,-0.9845,3,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,3,3,7,0,1,8,1,7,6,0,1,1,24,24,8,4,1,2,1,2,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,6,6,0,2,8,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,7,4,16,3,14,17,2,16,0,2,2,0,10,6,0,1,8,64,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893876176603689,0.0,0.10121607561793694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236728889136047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098570116259914,0.2323157165376589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713788739034525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107887253202013,0.0,0.05786612942492946,0.0,0.10988381572305464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958412870883073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216482090917414,0.0,0.0,0.2301274244623829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172274168219188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328681925520788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808349084263168,0.0,0.0,0.10105580706405884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249287227416574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528990011103075,0.2306644891425004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09134780011394697,0.0,0.0,0.08485848899765494,0.0882659696411854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703952478286531,0.0,0.0,0.12707608884970767,0.0,0.0,0.07934079152297252,0.09992774865563472,0.0,0.0,0.2163724116327186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12820303831384494,0.0,0.0,0.13026188659369614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18239348513891535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567998499033896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5007309510886215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536430295039782,0.0,0.26575571108007945,0.0,0.14666169247705466,0.0,0.2725663359572611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769970101312555,0.0,0.11179478068310446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084001316038774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331631334752808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369793464973783
mentalhealth,ppkkmmaann,2020/01/08,"I'm tired, so very tired of how every time I try to be selfish, it blows up in my face. ""It isn't your responsibility to always be there. If something does happen and your not there, it is okay, it isn't your fault."" I am often told this by my therapist whom I recently started seeing. 

For the past two weeks I was actually mostly happy. I hung out with my best friend a lot and had a good time. This was the most I have spent away from my father in a long time. I cam back home a few days ago and noticed by dad wasn't doing to well.

Yesterday he showed some alarming symptoms so I convinced him to let me take him to the ER. Currently I get an anxiety attack anytime I am near a hospital, but powered through it and spend the whole day there yesterday. 

Doctors ran tests and concluded he had a heart attack several days ago and was getting worse. If I had been home, I would have noticed sooner. Instead I was out having fun. Doctors said if I had waited another day or more he most likely would have died. 


This is now the second time in less than a year I have taken him to the ER and been told that.",3.049025654314588,4.207691145374452,4.4846074112464365,86.69321845037575,73.66960352422906,7.455713915522157,25.247214304223892,7.928766900206844,1.272633791137601,858,27,184,12,17,286,132,227,0.111,0.8140000000000001,0.075,-0.8079999999999999,3,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,3,0,3,11,14,2,1,14,1,28,7,2,2,0,27,42,15,1,5,6,2,0,1,1,2,5,1,2,0,10,10,0,1,1,1,2,1,4,5,3,2,17,2,26,9,22,20,10,30,0,0,1,0,16,8,0,10,22,136,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.11137805471651846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023453271948715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496840490899973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11967916550095407,0.0873119896607804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25968718537193075,0.10723239467871712,0.0877617919166601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197763062345978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944272505162048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845279046017065,0.0,0.0,0.23364141410700465,0.09987919466489142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616258853989876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817943527175436,0.0,0.11926032455741607,0.0,0.0,0.09572995616024013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092807889811012,0.12149747595681967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524901742706452,0.0,0.0,0.2289708705220215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167094698618306,0.0,0.05575997447198553,0.0,0.0,0.1010047578612908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703241423881716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598840120148506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895355804938203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269328738326145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856731186098133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909498044167252,0.0,0.0,0.12893862597050768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786572002325445,0.0,0.0,0.08078444024964894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862864460415926,0.08581435947444939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251805527457386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662091789660842,0.26235986158896946,0.0,0.21811933674099554,0.0,0.077489309500277,0.0,0.11149206815358627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417227880037653,0.0,0.0,0.09155119230651236,0.0,0.1026199285445195,0.0,0.0,0.12742623156377095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163120197337162,0.16215465168641402,0.0,0.0,0.07349837892735284
mentalhealth,the-bitlands,2020/01/08,"no choices left except alcohol I’m 16 years old, from an extremely abusive family, I don’t want to get into that. I was thinking to myself the last few days that I’d try to seek help and set up a doctor’s appointment for myself to talk to my doctor about therapy. This morning something happened that made me realize I can’t keep living the way I live right now, I tried to call my doctor but the office told me I need a parent to go with me, and I don’t want my parents involved in my mental health at all. I’ve been drinking more these days to try and feel better and it’s a give and take. I feel like when I’m drunk I’m happy but when I’m hungover I’m more sad than usual. I don’t know where to turn or what to do, I just need to get this out",2.1155454545454546,2.858502812121216,4.147045454545456,89.82056818181817,75.42424242424242,6.954545454545455,22.84090909090909,7.1686216300943375,0.6312727272727271,584,15,135,6,12,201,100,165,0.076,0.818,0.105,0.552,2,0,3,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,7,0,7,7,0,1,1,25,30,10,0,4,5,2,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,8,8,3,1,5,2,0,1,5,1,0,0,4,2,19,3,22,26,4,20,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,1,10,81,27,3,0.0,0.15939082380833844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437669415616301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189769503421628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13736566605122455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17351575027046287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41307791848700703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317838616610335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268187517486946,0.0,0.13604035851125065,0.09610510683530474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14056813461931927,0.12904920196444047,0.07645399171518749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896053305295655,0.14320498975318038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299440917818268,0.0,0.0,0.0901696658542076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957252355322533,0.0,0.0,0.0739317449310568,0.10965630898396822,0.0,0.0,0.14616244480916668,0.0,0.0,0.06572240707071315,0.0,0.23757711737871434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729136391071924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557015179090876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994980376377242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14116197480275178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987494905417695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148841169835328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035643698479622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114650014278323,0.1081265717703838,0.0,0.0,0.15384173372095586,0.0,0.0,0.08619856478533437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854496415244868,0.0,0.2740021309639064,0.14632520957937648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816092937837505,0.0,0.1586933542964872,0.10678014997994606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866300679769483
mentalhealth,TaziTazi15,2020/01/08,"my self-loath made me mute? thats all there is to it really. From a very young age i had a bad habit of hating myself cuz of minor situational problems i had in kindergarten (stuff like public shaming, verbal and physical abuse from the teachers, typical asian schools back in the day). I tried my best to avoid that mindset when it started to silence me, but by doing this i found myself alone, constantly debating and reasoning with myself for hours, usually the entire day (this started in elementary school), this made me develop other strange habits, each of them i hate to the pit of my soul.

Anyway, it got to the point that every mutter or sound that comes out of my mouth aches me with disgust, not just that, every thought or emotion i feel makes me SO UPSET, and the fact that id get upset over dumb shit like that makes me REALLY FUCKING UPSET lol. I still try to answer people cuz i dont like leaving them hanging, so id just make whale noises or wave my arms around in the air (i dont do that anymore cuz it gets lethally awkward)

I was always sort of shy, but i think its abnormal to be shy infront of ur own siblings or parents. I dont have any severe anxious behaviour though, i get really bad trembling when talking to my peers but thats about it. One more thing, i noticed i cant think and do an activity at the same time, so i have a hard time with things like reading. I considered myself dyslexic for a long time cuz the reading problem is a family thing but i dont really like self diagnosing. No idea whats up with me :p cant afford counselling. 

um, thx for ur time ;-; have a great day yall",4.750507150228512,5.358075839009288,5.679159663865549,81.7409803921569,69.24767801857585,8.50532212885154,29.31284092584402,8.563005593585519,2.0906890461447736,1268,45,252,19,21,418,179,323,0.21100000000000002,0.685,0.10400000000000001,-0.9901,2,2,0,0,1,0,38.0,0,1,2,1,14,24,6,7,16,1,18,5,3,10,2,47,38,22,1,2,11,1,2,5,0,0,1,1,0,1,24,12,0,1,8,2,0,2,8,17,1,1,8,3,38,7,35,29,6,32,1,0,0,1,9,11,3,5,24,168,62,4,0.0,0.10533148358609916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207317012491356,0.0,0.0,0.0739715849754809,0.0,0.0,0.06045477337276287,0.0,0.0,0.10043123854442357,0.088164510608373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913948771962817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835830142229217,0.14845489765002326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329464070889272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657912973370279,0.0,0.09606888047348028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719986536695484,0.0,0.0,0.09023121801480026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4167586549024302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000007927277142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498034866744873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380662668692722,0.0,0.04495030657098974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747381778344466,0.0,0.08218624344338901,0.13933910821165627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711011275783724,0.09801211777770537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963657582324496,0.17553989104569356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754819401461382,0.0,0.0,0.10035682231686592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413183544617708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171592591155676,0.0,0.0,0.0786733444267453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682378933499518,0.17802351074952846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121277859171272,0.0,0.0,0.0602406665863794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871248013999433,0.0,0.0,0.061631785951215726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403885254683201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17012981330090898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17784730579712374,0.0,0.22780542888401198,0.09140359028356053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17994227334650048,0.0,0.0,0.18548333257854496,0.10043123854442357,0.09125415716223224,0.0,0.09992686998281708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12584718238343856,0.0,0.07099533172712111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176876769744317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145412733011759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771828229287861,0.11392654225502245,0.08734340111800408,0.0705763485707984,0.207352275970222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207139795152626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979103446989217,0.07335147652834366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Transboiguything,2020/01/08,"a rant i cant remember the last time i showered. december twelfth maybe? i know its not good for me but i just have no energy lately. i didnt sleep last night and around 10 am i drank everything in the house i could get my hands on without dad noticing or being too concerned. i didnt want to have to deal with bullshit emotions like this but i didnt expect them to still be here when i sobered up. 

i keep trying to make plans to take better care of myself and i stick to the for maybe a day or two at best. i want so badly to do better and i know its bs to be upset about it when im not doing anything to fix it but i just am. i cant help it. its such a shitty thing to do but im a shitty person so i do it anyways.

i havent contemplated suicide in a couple months so thats good. better than how i used to be with my daily panic attacks at least.

i genuinely believe i can and have been doing better most of the time but then times like this come around when i just feel so shitty and like i cant even fucking get out of bed. im lucky to even have the energy to type all this bullshit out

the only motivation i have for writing this is so that i dont chuck all this bs drama at my friends. i know i nothing people on here tell me will help because it never has before. i just need to get it out somewhere.

im sorry if this is complete shit and/or hard to read. i dont expect anyone to give me any advice so i dont see the point in trying to make it understandable

i genuinely hope the people on this sub are having a good day and are doing better than they usually are if they struggle with day to day life

i guess thats all",0.6078222075346993,2.349317488764044,2.8789226701916735,93.07139788499671,81.97752808988764,5.424190350297423,19.178453403833448,6.37848985222837,-0.0791491077329809,1270,31,292,11,34,434,164,356,0.183,0.657,0.16,-0.7240000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,3,8,25,23,3,3,14,0,38,6,3,5,4,58,62,26,1,9,16,1,3,3,1,1,1,0,2,1,21,15,1,1,7,2,0,1,15,7,0,1,5,4,42,16,46,51,6,36,0,0,1,1,12,16,2,8,22,210,63,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140812563593898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665265320219516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05825125711478135,0.0,0.06855581704026419,0.1483244978766042,0.0,0.09477547304501162,0.0,0.0,0.06955913787713681,0.05078410308829937,0.0,0.07088941810039469,0.09386017847584337,0.08742715638208914,0.3683980981360103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493859260676366,0.0,0.0,0.07176291692599399,0.08734740257442082,0.0,0.0,0.06651507766824062,0.09217929743344988,0.0,0.21490842457281767,0.0858874303475398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29291090961030025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371087666312812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004898901716513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748723297534987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04212329295813642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643639591129846,0.07701738817347442,0.13057579632867528,0.07991712753259586,0.0,0.20962571256653906,0.0,0.0,0.0917737316521486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462807418871692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116798953569338,0.0,0.0,0.08274416192907982,0.0,0.0961268516681081,0.0,0.0,0.35995000764437074,0.0,0.0,0.07404844407197927,0.0,0.0,0.1373525585223846,0.13581513246769686,0.09397564392031676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058843274342433236,0.1221010104905565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121817356084568,0.0,0.16738921989787636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649606917761748,0.0,0.0,0.061772215068752585,0.06425266964249113,0.0,0.0,0.07817940645323974,0.0,0.07993677577819219,0.094847306925316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335988665220943,0.0,0.09774460328158467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551128226705905,0.07274178993998708,0.0,0.0,0.07875348302920125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333106863327193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437231785102364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638610776731936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551500287816377,0.0,0.0,0.08336868858332114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325707223169824,0.0,0.0,0.06653029501097242,0.0,0.0,0.08709215767552338,0.0,0.09112600391424054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263764229719063,0.0,0.072815322090732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055346481679657895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457336111674104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312203878372624,0.0,0.0813803229057213,0.08672711168709912,0.0,0.07195181676115825,0.09175256962644532,0.0,0.0982750520021224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803064444219888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kchris0710,2020/01/08,"Venting.. Adice? I get anxious over how groceries are put on the belt going to the cashier I realize this is an absurd thing to get anxious over but I just have to have things sorted out a certain way at the grocery store. I put boxed items with boxed items, berries with berries, dairy goes together, hair and body stuff is separated from house stuff, etc. My husband is usually great about just letting me put everything on the belt but last night he just started unloading everything and putting it anywhere it fit. I just can't get rid of the pit in my stomach and it has been almost 24 hours. I hate being so anxious over such a little thing. I couldn't even sleep last night. I just kept thinking about my bananas touching the spaghetti sauce jars. This is worse than it has been before, normally it just feels wrong until I unload my stuff at home but I can't shake this.. Any advice on how to deal with this weird anxiety would be much appriciated.",5.143379571248424,6.484290366120219,4.859562841530057,85.29446406052965,68.8360655737705,7.816561580496009,30.47036569987389,8.139509932561175,2.0355467843631785,759,30,147,10,13,232,112,183,0.11900000000000001,0.812,0.069,-0.8171,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,13,6,1,1,9,0,18,4,4,2,1,28,27,10,0,3,9,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,15,7,0,1,3,0,1,6,3,4,0,0,3,3,15,2,23,19,4,27,0,0,0,0,3,12,0,2,8,101,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986044476055508,0.0,0.0,0.11257743454931796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645288021360619,0.0,0.08600484539832041,0.3810248730632211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566542578506668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12487887142682395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159052763297673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538363420049645,0.0742556764722873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020807476581188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05684547657877849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17621232459992953,0.0,0.06389373922504611,0.0,0.0,0.12394899991994325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109964483703808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127714784445635,0.0,0.11071601490664773,0.1297233979433146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832828202536073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496221711341265,0.0,0.0,0.11267942194750573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264533780698798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110065622313616,0.11015266592647976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4520728557775749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250622877410303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957501966516073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38609930889746813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22407059660546366,0.07203742402992581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382029469838457,0.0,0.0,0.08923776122306362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145707171950758,0.07986352048035485,0.12291912891594232,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MayaRabbit,2020/01/08,"I don’t know what to do anymore Hi there, I’m 14 and I’ve given up on life. I’ve had depression and anxiety for the past 4 years of my life. I got to a private school that has a lot of pressure and I am in year 10 so my GCSEs are next year. I’ve had a few suicide attempts and the last one was last year August ( i was outed by my aunt and I come from an Asian family who are not supportive of LGBTQ+). I had a massive panic attack last night where I was disassociating and another this morning. I was feeling suicidal, going to school is hard for me I’ve missed around 40% and I’m in deep trouble. This morning I couldn’t get out of Bed, my mum was screaming at me to wake up as well as my dad screaming down the phone at me (he lives in Manchester my parents are divorced). My mum took my phone and didn’t let me call for help, I told her if she didn’t let me I would go to the neighbors and use their phone. I was going to call childline but I panicked and called an ambulance. By the time they had arrived I had calmed down, they talked to me and got me an GP appointment. My GP talked to me and we agreed that I have gotten worse and we would try and get an psychiatrist to update or change my diagnosis and/or go back on medication. I was on medication for a few years but stopped last year around the same time of my suicide attempt, my parents didn’t like me taking it. I might not be able to take my GCSEs next year and I may have to change school. I don’t want to change school, I like the people and the school despite the pressure but I don’t think I have a choice anymore. I’m scared for my future and don’t see the point of going on. I feel like I’m in Limbo or Hell. I just want everything to stop.",1.0744975156275058,2.814656117166216,2.8954552011540318,93.52910682801728,80.47138964577655,5.952524443019716,21.42082064433403,6.923569853693429,0.3189862798525409,1333,39,312,15,34,444,166,367,0.155,0.782,0.063,-0.9861,2,0,0,0,1,2,31.0,2,0,3,2,8,17,2,4,20,0,37,5,1,1,0,49,67,26,3,6,9,6,3,3,1,4,4,2,2,0,7,24,0,2,4,0,0,7,10,11,1,1,21,6,54,6,47,38,4,51,1,2,1,0,28,21,1,6,26,201,61,5,0.07741289455078594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117416969111682,0.05922065244294108,0.0,0.15354557985818196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13782777727386086,0.0,0.08806834323983305,0.0,0.05952573749674634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371416618505127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456777335536687,0.06668435404936984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667561264236635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957371800999043,0.0,0.07297798741129936,0.0,0.07828457096420596,0.05530378733490919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089008460678301,0.0,0.2199776597703332,0.0,0.12382832714952938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06934674807540384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051888231423608586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0425441023230194,0.2524073648811626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583198591245023,0.10935803358499474,0.1134600900035156,0.0,0.06835700415831869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581367463577187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15597069402070524,0.0,0.08212284766009878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646589831698034,0.07264675744261796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05245698080907051,0.0,0.0,0.09082735221543684,0.17191571640046338,0.0,0.07389936730032579,0.05366835388907632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318020740929568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750381223398056,0.3917299108129447,0.06168805427573175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944129232883253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25403142605204143,0.08784723535192716,0.0,0.0,0.11640972509718782,0.12444310458318715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04960305703246252,0.0,0.0,0.0902801627011409,0.0,0.0,0.07397133819999052,0.08600857423571201,0.052558273884127406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06685988570314795,0.0,0.0,0.09132026180998208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960348911604587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889035311585574,0.10998379840885487,0.0,0.0,0.34895956206482465
mentalhealth,Pickldikl,2020/01/08,"15 m, question about mental health So ive been kinda down in the dumps lately, ive just recently returned back to school after winter break, and i feel like all the days are just starting to merge together, even though i have been social... ish. I have been feeling like there kinda is a black cloud following me around everywhere i go, even though i am around friends and doing sports and exercising a bit i really don't remember the last time i felt happy for an extended period of time. I also think i had my first mental breakdown on Christmas day, its kinda hard to explain but that was the worst that i have ever felt in my life, i was shaking and hyperventilating on the floor of my bathroom for 5 maybe 10 minutes until my mother found and comforted me. Anyway the ting that really pushed me to kinda seek help was that i have had thoughts of self harm. So I'm wondering if its possible that all of this is just my hormones acting up or something of that sort. I also would prefer not going to a psychologist because i really don't want to seem like I'm broken or something to my friends, i don't want them to treat me differently.",7.802086038961043,6.528146562500004,8.155389610389609,72.86233766233768,63.28571428571429,11.181168831168833,33.7564935064935,10.230975488527342,3.2390857142857143,906,30,171,17,11,300,130,224,0.1,0.7829999999999999,0.11699999999999999,0.4456,1,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,1,19,12,1,1,10,0,23,3,0,0,3,39,41,16,0,5,8,1,5,3,2,1,3,0,0,1,9,7,0,0,13,2,0,6,4,4,0,1,12,6,28,8,26,28,4,32,0,0,1,0,9,9,0,11,19,123,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008802712506712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22361649530348807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965765904570114,0.0,0.07656296372015431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711974975092187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199976875751065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312224728582103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16591169758203614,0.11360997127116833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701156284751985,0.17945350850821862,0.2411862570614823,0.0,0.0,0.1068330206961994,0.0,0.13771098439381654,0.1940723638609784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142759708662106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13370068820136402,0.112510533595151,0.0,0.0,0.13350408354500698,0.0,0.0,0.08418523963706265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237858333042034,0.14167925351638413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887131051782384,0.1840815268535584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617939464149755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25314512609160444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415921128744476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069774857817666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24138258797534065,0.0,0.12401220651012562,0.0,0.1422772857729081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271111984741432,0.0,0.1143390878019292,0.13102540199454174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803065624821247,0.0,0.19338191421511733,0.0,0.0,0.08889843325781267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047769462246072,0.2467974687312849,0.0997102468911043,0.14647362076038145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481611130938405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362049416103948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892207362942716,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ArtAceAlways,2020/01/08,"Just me venting about how I want to give up on life, because I don't stand a chance in the world. I have no motivation. Even though I really want to write those job applications, start exercising, etc., I still sit around all day doing nothing, because when it comes to actually doing it, I see no point. There are a few things that I really love doing, because I get immediate enjoyment out of it, but anything that is ""for the future"", I just can't bring myself to do. Because I don't see a future. Not an enjoyable one anyways. 
All I see is me, lonely, stuck in a job that I don't really care that much about, with money, but no time to do the things I love. And I want to change that, but since that is the only future I can see, it's not doing much for my motivation. Every day I'm one step closer to that shitty future, and it makes me want to crawl into a hole and die.  
I can't do anything productive, because it would take time away from the things I enjoy right now. Since the future is so shitty, I want to spend every second of my ""now"", happy. I don't want to invest time into a future that isn't bright. But I also know that if I don't invest in my future, it never will be bright.   
    
And my parents keep telling me about how bad it's gonna be if I don't start being productive, but if that's all I see anyway, what's the point?  
What's the point in getting a job if I won't have time to spend the money on enjoyable things?
What's the point in exercising to live longer, if I'm not gonna enjoy living it?   
   
I know that this is probably all just in my mind, and that I could probably have a good life, if I just got my shit together, but I'm too much of a failure to do that. That's the other problem. Even if I sent those job applications, there's no way I'd get something I like, because so many others are more qualified than me. I'm not bad at doing what I do, but as long as others are better, I'm still gonna fail. Nobody wants people with ""slightly above average"" skill - they want people with great skill. People who know what they're doing. Nobody wants a shitty 19 year old, with little work experience, who can't even find the motivation to get out of bed.",5.112527472527475,4.348354098901101,6.420087912087912,81.44991208791211,68.45054945054945,9.30197802197802,26.551648351648353,8.608573733854374,1.5846334065934071,1685,38,368,23,25,575,175,455,0.165,0.7120000000000001,0.122,-0.9796,5,2,1,0,0,1,63.0,0,0,1,8,27,21,1,0,23,0,40,7,1,6,5,67,83,28,1,19,22,1,0,1,0,6,4,0,1,0,40,15,0,1,7,2,6,4,20,6,0,3,3,7,43,15,47,70,10,55,0,2,7,2,10,24,1,7,25,257,83,10,0.0,0.0,0.07084257253573174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05805446118730909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947954627953013,0.06462523704599518,0.0,0.0,0.06820570459362295,0.0,0.12122814068825745,0.2655206453876511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420467221575206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401577972820017,0.0,0.07679623600730574,0.06253445093490444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057961465880288124,0.0,0.0,0.09363596762521324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534249382962091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096298546796359,0.14384559739733074,0.0,0.12232939731620505,0.0,0.0,0.07101216515554325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635081874684076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171225991686552,0.06964005791040237,0.0,0.06088952065454265,0.05806111912511444,0.08003661038600883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727908137098026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881586635253409,0.06452606709675028,0.0,0.0,0.119689488661106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255246051413328,0.03546641253679873,0.07275959466198277,0.12820601724448535,0.06424458483724346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310402438184547,0.0,0.04845794816829108,0.07360027288606692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330059124094625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600977669819914,0.0,0.05598999579878535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965717945872893,0.0,0.07617658962911834,0.0,0.09838495219341614,0.05521202165151283,0.0,0.0,0.08060852568373432,0.0,0.0,0.15098538889117033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274504216461611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654009364310426,0.06946392900667746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13951928676380473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061996017316892936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892454053404693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451806560758295,0.12010321847802816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055887433660021774,0.0,0.0,0.10276670000585794,0.0,0.11594945264944713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054582655453529104,0.0,0.06345152039023076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19291645274594388,0.0,0.07132454561308063,0.0,0.1693236887516356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3853674719981504,0.05762279591883051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05285026667992012,0.0,0.0,0.05156964135950831,0.0,0.0,0.04674901401063408
mentalhealth,Separate-Jellyfish,2020/01/08,"I asked this question about antidepressants and nobody answered so im trying again Ive been on atleast 5 different antidepressants in the past year. None of them have helped me. I just switched from zoloft 150 mg to prozac 40 mg without weaning off because my psychiatrist said it was okay. And added lamictal 50 mg been on it for two weeks. So far notice no difference and i feel worse. For people with experience, why might i be feeling worse? Is it because of dramatically shifting antidepressants? Also my dr added on lamictal to see if that would help because the antidepressants don’t work alone. As soon as i started taking the lamictal I started having obsessive thoughts. Im starting to lose hope",4.951145833333332,7.700972656250002,5.255937500000002,76.37864583333338,72.4375,8.329166666666666,32.541666666666664,9.075114841892004,3.2583885416666667,572,28,96,13,12,181,91,128,0.11900000000000001,0.813,0.068,-0.7666,1,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,2,7,4,0,1,3,1,11,3,0,0,0,15,22,9,0,3,3,0,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,5,4,11,2,18,14,1,14,0,1,1,0,6,6,0,4,8,60,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15850210363048095,0.0,0.12238512010532075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430706742674377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798732036403229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197860696081791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970136977862225,0.0,0.0,0.15476209064314742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20515744228999686,0.0,0.0,0.1520021179420401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33061645824688296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17121133719329062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235004467555625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742357550989953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460929074495857,0.10609787531501468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143854646433662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455750002819354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195215647008342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3249650758741464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506617591014337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149575929506028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390333940287944,0.0,0.14949672764924601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227585413821223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809376641145998,0.0,0.0,0.147523998696119,0.0,0.11141411190350003,0.0,0.3119193432220099,0.10871441440492476,0.0,0.0,0.09855200750269798
mentalhealth,Mission_South,2020/01/08,"Wk 1 of my new job & can't stop crying help I went through a series of bad workplaces. I didn't get trained to do my job and got bullied at all of them. At my new workplace, I'm the one with the most experience but I know nothing. I'm a lawyer and supposed to be talking to people. When I talk to people I start feeling panicking and stutter. From Day 1 my boss was concerned about my attitude because I don't talk much/smile. I hate being a lawyer but I don't have an ""attitude""... It's just that when I'm at work, all the memories of me getting bullied start playing in my head and I can't make it stop (being told incompetent, no talent, etc... which is true anyway). And I can't smile because I've been crying pretty much all day & trying to hold it in. Yesterday I managed to stay half day but left in the afternoon because I was hyperventilating & just couldn't stop crying. I was crying from 12pm (my lunch break), when my break was up I was still crying hard so I left. I got home & I was still crying until I went to bed at 1am. I don't know how I'm going to keep it together today.",2.239358974358975,3.3570672094017127,4.255213675213678,87.7092307692308,75.62393162393163,6.90940170940171,24.96581196581197,7.3871296695380915,1.0223606837606842,853,28,190,10,18,293,116,234,0.12300000000000001,0.695,0.183,0.9266,2,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,1,1,11,6,1,0,8,0,21,2,1,3,4,28,41,14,0,1,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,6,6,1,5,3,1,0,3,9,3,0,2,13,2,29,3,26,24,6,35,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,1,19,117,35,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38596158627969135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435669754981854,0.1628601924456851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5869324079098501,0.17229814674127855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931918759115066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711228361419475,0.0,0.0,0.04502857640103168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305448851390763,0.0,0.05061166325618667,0.0,0.14244986517749342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977524320352107,0.08792277515278522,0.09139549842682153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596912817990832,0.0,0.08932881626845253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17674548556521036,0.07915563544821574,0.0,0.0,0.09788392978439152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19351571504442466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059444498206074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093044975966656,0.0,0.0,0.17201857353253416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545009097360247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06034556079278226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347820489515485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060033233757993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606631409416122,0.09492013285184103,0.14223790504042705,0.22336037801403166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147356410064904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441315079814883,0.08509528793733258,0.0,0.06046208651203746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16510862723961806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483265803855925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hf10603,2020/01/08,I think I’m starting to disassociate again. This sucks. Any way you guys keep this from happening?,2.2416666666666667,5.073995388888889,3.1388888888888893,83.245,95.11111111111113,6.844444444444445,22.66666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.7148666666666674,79,3,15,2,3,25,16,18,0.14300000000000002,0.857,0.0,-0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,7,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31857782349251623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4638620962979298,0.4142692813177106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41640048280288505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315877243404289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001786942930237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37185220052349294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alamar1,2020/01/08,"How to deal with father wanting to leave the house? Hi everyone,

I am a 23M who is finishing up college (living with parents). My family has had some hard times dealing with a deviant sibling and my father losing his job over the last 2 years. My sibling has remained better but still has some issues w/ following house rules. My mother and father differ tremendously in how to handle her problems. My father has felt powerless and like my mother controls him now that she pays most of the bills (he voiced this to me). He is upset about the treatment of her, sister bringing unwanted pets and their marriage overall. They have recently come close to divorce before this. I supported my father and made that clear. He said it has nothing to do with me. However, I feel bad. I wish I could find a way to mend things but I am unsure how to proceed from here. I just want everyone to be happy. He states he will be telling her he is leaving the household in a month or two. He wants me to say nothing until he talks to her. He does not make a lot since he got fired from his old job (though, he still works near full time). Can I have some advice?",3.6111954365079337,5.3148013794642885,4.329404761904765,86.18781746031748,73.15178571428571,6.942063492063492,26.283730158730158,7.594959193182576,1.4253986111111108,895,31,173,11,18,286,140,224,0.124,0.7859999999999999,0.09,-0.7977,5,0,0,0,1,0,28.0,0,0,2,4,10,8,0,1,10,0,19,0,0,6,1,38,33,13,0,7,5,9,4,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,7,11,0,1,3,0,2,3,1,4,0,1,5,7,28,4,26,24,6,25,0,1,0,0,40,7,0,6,14,115,35,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970945963721713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022856962134341,0.0,0.0,0.1042418538506267,0.0,0.0,0.10834480443994222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552632111466692,0.0,0.0,0.13739861673857162,0.0978094501401644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525924235748319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799057282892334,0.0,0.0,0.10720404786058672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341155822667099,0.0,0.0,0.11548583837470147,0.0,0.061941687009344236,0.0,0.1176230203843154,0.0,0.1119664073262384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797761409069798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304077517957182,0.10973949301878448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28270626254871195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786231497140296,0.24313257096318056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09985708423611914,0.0,0.2594280276871453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05984925080799688,0.0,0.10817324804416437,0.0,0.0,0.13705060479354128,0.0,0.10414849273652522,0.0,0.1159162164615766,0.08177234984101782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977814984323559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350917223261629,0.0,0.12854730693950453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602615900052153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172197527707656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095788932556012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652932661191218,0.0974200722338813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133654817894312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956636540407504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390160510502956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846404904086778,0.10707386753716537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138619287615742,0.0,0.1203595264881837,0.0,0.14286609768209935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966857612854034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21676804273085748,0.09723794763921707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087351734510692,0.0,0.0,0.08918434765608699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888853888579797
mentalhealth,Dejammey,2020/01/08,"Need help finding, therapist, after near-death wreck and hernia surgeries I am self-employed and looking for a therapist and life coach in the Greensboro/Triad area. 

A week before my 40th birthday in August 2018 I was hit by a Mack truck dump truck and pinned in my car with every one of my ribs shattered and all my organs pushed up into my chest. I stayed awake the entire time which was horrific and when I got to the er and asked the surgeon if I was going to live he told me to tell the people that matter that I loved them. Other than my heart and one lung the surgeon had to take all my organs out rearranging them then put them back in. The surgeon told my father that he was surprised I survived. 

I was in shock when I woke up and had a fire lit in me to get healthy again. In under a year I was told I could go back to living my life like normal but I don’t think the Dr.'s realized how active I actually was (rock climbing, mountain bike, race motorcycles, rebuilding classic cars, etc). Within 6 months I blew out my intestines in a foot long hernia tear across my chest while rock climbing. I end up having hernia surgery in May 2019 and got a huge mesh put in me from my chest down to bellow my bellybutton. This set me back mental a bunch, more so than the actual wreck did. Then I ended up having complications from the top part of my hernia mesh not taking and a few weeks ago had to have the entire surgery over again and this time I am just utterly crushed and really fell the life I am used to living is over. 

Before the wreck happened I was looking for a business/ life coach to help me reach goals that I have. I was inspired by the type of therapist in the tv show billions. Someone who could help me be better and push me to reach my goals. 

But now I am not sure if that’s the type of therapist I need. I still have flashbacks to being trapped in the car, but now my real problems are coming from the feeling of losing my active life from the hernia surgeries. I need help knowing what type of therapist I need.

Thank you for any help.",6.0118115942029,5.5777733695652225,6.165748792270534,82.91717391304348,66.51207729468601,8.745893719806764,29.352657004830927,7.893859768569023,1.7404454106280198,1621,47,331,16,23,517,203,414,0.08800000000000001,0.785,0.127,0.9121,1,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,3,8,15,11,1,0,29,0,30,17,8,2,3,50,57,26,0,10,8,1,2,1,0,1,8,0,0,0,11,19,0,0,7,7,0,13,3,4,1,3,19,5,54,7,56,32,7,68,0,1,3,1,19,28,0,3,26,227,65,5,0.0,0.0,0.16209319943649125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362043079204543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05647808819354583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776422441374686,0.0,0.0,0.1915851781967948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14134197009887264,0.0,0.0,0.07345258906975229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154179234478192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262024672842268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471185297061868,0.0,0.0926247373626436,0.0,0.0,0.06997474359827956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04199349757197275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590786239786466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04339115012950325,0.0,0.09440053085993108,0.0,0.13284826093950994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734424535569976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841681115365747,0.27833943438197506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04564311040090775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933097966345717,0.04057492602858659,0.0,0.22000884614636426,0.0734982506280771,0.13948522981300246,0.09291374706611986,0.0,0.0,0.07495751359381313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369670445396074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629117344484907,0.0,0.0,0.24632750018694674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137315381144704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112556130491968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993703189979042,0.0,0.05757767746503125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946937904070664,0.0,0.16698004409499065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09453115791145963,0.05320512502854068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866411652162736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036954084366348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852219383852852,0.06632529381742581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827536111057758,0.0,0.1248892712322053,0.0,0.07259095471141074,0.07646296104632758,0.0,0.4821478436041436,0.0,0.053216255244154125,0.0,0.0,0.0968563727562895,0.0,0.0,0.23807873041934485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173011011892176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323832698424007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05348265160516988
mentalhealth,machefrieden,2020/01/08,"For those who have received treatment at an inpatient psychiatric facility, what are some things that made your treatment bearable/more enjoyable? Hi, I’m a current 2nd year occupational therapy student who has a clinical rotation in an inpatient psychiatric unit. I’m doing a little research on what have been good interventions in that setting, but I am also interested to hear personal experiences. 

In case you’re unfamiliar with OT, we focus on activities of daily living that are meaningful to an individual and use those activities in a therapeutic way. Some examples of this can be cooking, helping an individual use the toilet/bathe as independently as possible after an illness/injury, and recommending/teaching the use of adaptive equipment. 

From the mental health side, we mostly run groups. The topics range from coping skills to mindfulness to preparatory activities that make reintegration back into society if that is something an individual is struggling with (for example, homeless or recovering addicts). 

Is there any specific activity or group that made an impact on you or you feel benefitted you in any way? I want to be the best I can be for my future patients and appreciate any feedback you can give me. Thank you!",11.848851674641145,11.282527401913875,11.983009569377993,46.37556698564593,54.88516746411483,15.44133971291866,48.17272727272727,14.117786864225405,7.454503923444976,1013,57,136,37,10,344,134,209,0.017,0.84,0.14400000000000002,0.9793,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,2,6,0,2,3,7,0,1,16,0,17,4,0,7,0,27,30,11,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,14,8,1,0,2,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,3,13,6,28,24,4,22,0,0,0,0,18,12,0,7,5,103,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17795758666235947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305443565952605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3330299330310535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12552281799382928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17131212979032734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596817405772991,0.0,0.0,0.0825399261403704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156596347072075,0.0,0.13691942246427613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17351833090144353,0.18398529952452405,0.0,0.1094174940606712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16361110372955914,0.14414544283532935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30892655357502224,0.1089651257832862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645092741318378,0.0,0.1648276174802106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14253638657670842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18403052882274026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567146296248347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17065570512465514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029105747672095,0.1866811507643018,0.0,0.10845055524287844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4229653398916662,0.0,0.0,0.096284204819384,0.2591473821167129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512232532467536
mentalhealth,LadyVulpeslyya,2020/01/08,"It's my birthday today. It's my birthday. I'm 30. I made an appointment with a psychologist today to help with my crippling self-image issues, perfectionism, and newfound lack of motivation or passion for things I used to love.



I've talked to my husband about it and he is incredibly supportive, but I haven't told anyone else and feel very lonely.



I didn't think this is what I'd be doing on my 30th  birthday, but I am hoping I will thank myself for it on my 31st.



Thanks for listening.",3.4239432989690712,5.2177949381443325,5.074832474226807,80.27451675257736,73.84536082474227,7.73659793814433,26.55798969072165,8.472884824447931,1.9260113402061847,387,14,74,7,8,131,66,97,0.054000000000000006,0.7190000000000001,0.226,0.9326,0,2,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,1,7,0,0,2,0,8,2,0,3,0,15,20,6,0,2,3,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,2,13,6,12,15,1,4,0,1,0,2,7,2,0,2,2,49,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664270292732324,0.2295389348987228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871432022982956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327320287973047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15015848187516315,0.0,0.0,0.22250625682614214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23382272333400975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20219029458358306,0.21197680816026465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23370576048014965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542196397037687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006190567078684,0.0,0.4125021729633801,0.0,0.0,0.14883150883312454,0.14354545406557834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4246968800842178,0.2140644138688273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19348470086732847,0.0,0.1848431593942723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-Chronic-Pain-,2020/01/08,"Is it me or my therapist? I’ve been seeing a therapist for the past 8 months or so to help unpack a lot of trauma I’ve faced (she’s brought up the possibility of PTSD on multiple occasions) 

I’ve been in a rut for a long time. Feeling terrible,  dealing with triggers/flashbacks/nightmares/ etc. And on multiple occasions, I’ve brought up how I feel like these sessions aren’t helping me as much as I need them to.

My therapist is such a nice woman, and she’s great at giving advice for some of my smaller issues (issues with parents/anxieties about smaller things, etc) but when it comes to dealing and coping with trauma, her advice usually boils down to 

“write out your feelings and then rip it up. Learn to let go. It will take a long time. Talk about it more. Try doing activities to distract yourself.”

I don’t want to cal these tips useless, but I do with that something else could be offered to me because I really feel like I’m not improving whatsoever 

So am I just not tackling these tips correctly? Or is my therapist not treating me properly?",4.223676470588234,5.945662200980394,5.347205882352942,79.43492647058825,71.59803921568627,8.629411764705884,31.867647058823533,9.188382445141503,2.9751823529411765,835,39,154,18,16,276,121,204,0.086,0.8240000000000001,0.09,-0.6427,2,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,1,0,8,10,0,1,8,0,14,2,1,1,1,32,28,16,0,3,9,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,10,10,1,0,5,0,0,4,5,5,0,0,4,5,19,5,31,20,6,22,0,1,1,0,14,9,0,5,11,107,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332596777011132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913043022994809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275614950092436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281157281466284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952932244659668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24609428315592574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09970366216988802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662190760864557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413927519487507,0.17053083709261407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449375148629205,0.06783075132836339,0.0,0.0,0.1315865042951387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999887107799984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491459110310375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204597282546327,0.0,0.11661916273311965,0.0,0.0,0.21124633584190705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146919016425758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526599183800924,0.0,0.08773778816558761,0.08849833395169092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393542444049146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455196131250682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13951663430512176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646023962641223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510845496484496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918833518046423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897381934546722,0.0959309832908095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5543096028821326,0.07929246851980208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919075401699368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103248324862525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13144986849976825,0.0,0.07039717097341941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,boopityboop8,2020/01/08,"No sense of identity For a long time, I’ve felt like I have no sense of self. Mostly in regards to stuff like interests and likes and dislikes. It’s like I only get into popular things in order to keep up with trends and impress people. I don’t have my own taste in things. My music taste is all just a range of popular stuff like Radiohead, Beyoncé and Kendrick Lamar. And sometimes I feel like I force myself to listen to or watch things I don’t actually enjoy. Like I’ve watched every Marvel movie even though I don’t really like them. 

I feel like my identity is just copying other people and trying to like what is popular. I don’t know what I actually like. I think a lot of this comes from a fear of being labelled when I was younger. I was so desperate not to be labelled as a particular thing like an emo or a hipster that I ended up not developing any identity at all. I was really sensitive to criticism as well, like I used to love Twilight but then people started making fun of it so I pretended I never liked it.

I don’t have much of a social circle due to years of social anxiety and depression which I think affects my identity since I don’t have many outside influences. However, I’ve noticed I’ve been starting to mimic my boyfriend’s interests lately which I think is really unhealthy but I think I’m doing it because I don’t have my own identity. 

Has anyone else had this problem? How can I find out who I am?",3.9891220238095246,5.2141196284722255,5.737738095238098,78.35250000000002,71.46527777777777,9.235714285714286,29.339285714285715,9.606745405546679,2.7834452380952377,1135,45,218,27,21,390,148,288,0.109,0.7240000000000001,0.16699999999999998,0.6769,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,9,27,0,1,8,0,27,3,0,5,3,40,45,19,0,1,8,0,3,14,0,0,0,2,0,1,19,11,2,1,9,1,0,1,12,3,1,0,6,9,34,24,31,37,7,21,0,1,2,1,7,8,0,4,25,152,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.1830804212357256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379066002157661,0.0,0.07176061696673824,0.0,0.0,0.0655906816080854,0.0961143731194836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718269615801293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080475630054604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079416390188356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836209390973116,0.0,0.08308344361091577,0.0,0.0,0.0619573598703069,0.0,0.07903481193764895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555677601079988,0.09486131745644827,0.13402871248587256,0.0900675717403338,0.0,0.08573612879021214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04900927411655282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337825068957816,0.0,0.0,0.051552809789413616,0.0,0.10581619770276507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6415978217868148,0.0,0.0,0.08301452949202498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974971064801413,0.08466273237400535,0.0,0.0626156084210166,0.09510361129424716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689575151607653,0.0,0.0723482480161055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679768674630273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134297795394537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19509786000990387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975877730030606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18028177744633567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097859139552393,0.0,0.0,0.07759651803875818,0.0,0.0,0.19124489856249724,0.0,0.0,0.09277560657821024,0.0,0.1327914137829211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21476871051930024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492796645280983,0.2404259885191523,0.09216299880063812,0.0,0.054698486997702835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06368748071909082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101745675642916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843420177921472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06040738549623392
mentalhealth,sadcatxv,2020/01/08,I’ve been having bad mental health issues and I can’t fix it My life is filled with thoughts of suicide and anger and hate and anxiety and depression and negativity I’ve been hated since in 1st grade I’ve had mental breakdowns and I got banned from a subreddit due to my mental behavior and I live with siblings who makes fun of me because I have friends and my brother calls me disabled since I went to special ed classes to help with my anxiety I’ve been hated online life is not fair someone called me weird and I wanna end my life I just wish I lived a happy life and not hate and suicidal I can’t find a therapist due to my social anxiety I can’t follow my dreams I faked a suicide once and made me have a friend unfriending me I just feel like I am controlled by everyone and being ruined I just take everything seriously I just feel like I am the biggest clown I tried to commit suicide and I was scared I don’t feel loved people call me annoying because I tried my best to be funny and my positivity is weak some dude raised the middle finger on me I just wish I was never born,3.5252809285149027,4.909359502242157,4.9770034291743634,82.74390662094436,72.81165919282513,7.937641783170668,27.01899235030335,8.4952907291091,1.8713647586388813,871,31,174,15,17,292,117,223,0.254,0.5529999999999999,0.193,-0.9491,0,0,0,0,0,5,0.0,0,0,0,2,5,23,6,1,7,0,20,8,1,3,2,41,37,16,4,3,7,1,4,2,2,0,6,0,0,0,2,19,0,2,5,1,0,3,8,14,0,0,10,4,38,9,16,25,2,12,0,2,0,1,10,4,0,1,7,110,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180454661556503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932876159994283,0.11583352324102862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997063543002202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29104522420305323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656096125769453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183133439710054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415000203782036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078541721862177,0.08538819454517492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441186061326484,0.1357492653004432,0.0,0.0,0.08683674025595266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14680783356231536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598758260503832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011391214603507,0.0,0.3752078884153024,0.0,0.10099039805072237,0.0,0.0,0.06368270269482985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916498080844104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684313937482091,0.09283344837142933,0.0,0.16778983031373146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574956443986355,0.08990005681791559,0.0634194172415795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287240955891505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327699663604383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118175863247912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658674564746087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951208414084977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15718527945636013,0.0,0.0,0.0968499733781046,0.08050103569170924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41569882897840205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07143513770617857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031307097167968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542673793849679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901009874826655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807453370027628,0.0,0.0,0.21851191489954666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sven_the_mediocre,2020/01/08,"I’m going to get help I’ve been struggling with my mental health for a few years now and finally called my gp to set up an appointment, the whole time I was talking I was at the verge of tears and then they tell me that I need to go in at 8am tomorrow to set up the appointment in person. I have no idea how I can do this, I really don’t want to have a breakdown in the middle of the clinic where everyone can see. I also have had sleep issues for the past week and I’m not sure if I’ll be able to wake up in time. I need to do it this now since lectures start next week and I still have work to do.",1.4394117647058842,2.084328823529411,3.509588235294121,94.12364705882356,76.94117647058823,7.2047058823529415,20.21764705882353,7.554174236665415,0.2496552941176473,464,9,119,6,10,159,83,136,0.07,0.8959999999999999,0.034,-0.5549,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,6,2,0,1,9,0,15,4,2,1,1,13,25,8,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,4,1,13,1,22,20,2,30,0,0,1,0,6,12,0,1,14,79,17,2,0.1824023472171316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458670911693872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18625319031369594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17429325944683408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19981285562007245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952976980417004,0.0,0.2073269147744741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19388516557352029,0.0,0.0,0.12226044846317975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059100479181312,0.0,0.19038066087711625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18381866450494805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704980584995073,0.0,0.0,0.19398696557493203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741236796745448,0.0,0.15926669400348928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685161430633025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14535105502054949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15088510651185838,0.0,0.1825340760108653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12910532018001464,0.0,0.14566675010631858,0.0,0.0,0.1906865371068663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191205360903572,0.0,0.0,0.14660809741501826,0.1594276911766654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21272055100625936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075856302705232,0.0,0.29262432119521264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036457067045758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279108117554236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746113131196902
mentalhealth,aristapop,2020/01/08,"My family is toxic, and here is how i found out So last semester i went to college and stayed in the dorms on campus. I already knew my family wasnt so healthy, but damn i didnt realize how bad till i came home for winter break. 
I went from confident to verryy insecure and anxious. Just by being in the same house with my family. They have already done some things to trigger panic attacks. 
Its kinda sad but, im ready to go back home for spring semester",2.6992391304347843,4.570590228260869,4.414565217391306,83.8951086956522,76.06521739130434,8.078260869565218,24.54347826086957,8.841846274778883,1.8985608695652163,359,12,71,8,8,121,65,92,0.222,0.6729999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.9145,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,7,6,2,2,2,0,7,0,0,3,0,18,13,10,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,6,0,0,3,0,0,4,2,6,0,0,8,0,10,0,14,4,2,15,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,2,5,49,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3774659161635885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19321224957388275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19456832618449488,0.0,0.13150949232801207,0.14280071196440575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956097515788313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502038119043722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4836881563762879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18752268598344185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09719879694554627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3431087980615605,0.0,0.0,0.1973426249380607,0.0,0.0,0.18473891041461687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13941013505791247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006637713644881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18229242284351505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136229865663397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170881749486826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AzuraBeth,2020/01/08,"I just don't know how to go on with my life Last year, my mental health reached the worst point it's ever been for me. Although I try to take steps to be able to deal with my past experiences, it's just too difficult. I'm still on the waiting list for therapy when I started the process at the beginning of last year. Around Christmas, I was so fucked up I couldn't remember anything that I needed to do and would have so many panic attacks that I couldn't get out of bed. As I'm in uni, this meant that I was severely behind on my work and the penalty is that my grade will be capped at 40%. Today I completed an essay but accidentally ran out of time as I couldn't find something that I already created and needed to include which is probably because of my past mental state. My self worth comes from my work and I was really proud of my essay but because I submitted 30 minutes later, it might be capped at 40%. I've reached out to the relevant people and took the steps to hopefully fix this problem but I don't know if I'll be able to get my work fully graded and not just capped. Now it's just a waiting game but I am just a mess right now as if my grade is capped, it'll bring down my average that I've worked so hard to get. It's just like what's the point of even trying? I have had persistent suicidal thoughts for several years now but wouldn't do it because it'd hurt people I care about. But what's the point in going on when all I get is pain, trauma and failure?",5.3606279553622045,4.607693282958202,6.152422924153588,83.53656705125783,67.93890675241157,9.632759599016456,30.51276716474371,9.007467420416297,2.1757378853792315,1165,38,258,18,17,385,152,311,0.161,0.767,0.07200000000000001,-0.9829,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,6,21,14,2,1,12,0,29,4,0,1,2,50,55,25,1,11,15,0,1,1,0,5,3,0,1,1,19,14,0,2,6,1,1,8,7,10,0,0,9,1,31,4,42,33,2,47,0,1,0,1,3,19,1,4,20,169,50,7,0.20943599795357376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555891584888665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861739906061283,0.09322122059438248,0.0,0.119131841417271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915053606567693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676697904561658,0.0,0.0,0.09020528375319237,0.10979482958385643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795965879316244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916525070519793,0.0947234252930878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243429680788843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571035393827518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968101026506845,0.2188433295574092,0.0,0.1190273040914828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938067583720122,0.0,0.0,0.1113103360779292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040086011753118,0.0,0.0,0.11210278373382032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11510054725075593,0.17071829138244454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396541955645447,0.05115992478961705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616761482260548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21106222606477032,0.11108924846621353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552941387286808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11142733407919284,0.12286400904594275,0.0,0.0,0.19993035822381988,0.14519655052958028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29697707064474604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290371431042535,0.1002009825461103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708503160214219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186250792867996,0.08942859895675043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924371107975496,0.23660306410082346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061703167087513,0.0,0.0,0.07411993865635255,0.0,0.08362792925261578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11454449446161125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873490291477282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975415809406068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313439407357515,0.06106190732320475,0.0,0.0992604186757612,0.0,0.1163455499380852,0.1421932948705084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30494380176179714,0.0,0.0,0.07438866196694018,0.0,0.0,0.20230487407977385
mentalhealth,cardinalwren,2020/01/08,"i don't know what to do, any advice would be appreciated I moved almost 500 miles away last August for college. I love my school, and the classes, but with one semester finished I have a total of zero friends and absolutely no social life. I've been more depressed than I have ever been, and suicidal for the first time in a long time. it's Wednesday and I'm supposed to drive back Saturday. but every time I think of going back I break down into tears. I'm terrified. I love my school so much and I want to do so well but I'm scared I'm going to kill myself. I relapsed into self harm since I've been away, and picked up binge drinking and other forms of substance abuse just so I can feel *something* and not be stuck sober with my thoughts.

I'm moving into a different dorm. I'm supposed to start looking for an apartment. but all I want to do is sob when I think of how fucking miserably lonely I am, but then I think of how pathetic it would be if I dropped out of *art school* after half of a year. I'm fucking up everything and even my parents are tired of this because they have to constantly worry about me from hundreds of miles away.

I feel worthless and pathetic, and I am so so lost. I can't imagine any sort of future, I can't even see myself after college. I don't know what to do and I am so, so, so fucking scared.",1.91661818181818,3.788733243636365,3.546545454545456,89.2278181818182,78.38181818181819,6.1454545454545455,24.45454545454545,7.087006719466742,0.9495090909090907,1042,37,219,12,25,346,141,275,0.266,0.6579999999999999,0.076,-0.9969,2,2,2,0,1,1,29.0,0,0,1,2,19,17,4,3,7,0,25,8,0,3,3,47,54,30,2,5,8,1,2,0,1,2,2,0,1,1,6,18,1,0,9,2,0,5,6,13,1,4,6,4,30,4,39,43,5,42,0,6,2,5,7,14,4,3,21,155,36,7,0.0,0.12860317444375466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606487554939097,0.0,0.0,0.10868799604050307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476230183287975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059331424474894,0.16692244831629774,0.0,0.06616550291350763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11729411353110082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348608663488824,0.0,0.0,0.11340210055024355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632872423348944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433804332584826,0.09818142506371164,0.09145035877774456,0.0,0.09754952930511857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109763043687199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232480299443344,0.0,0.0,0.08385840184694064,0.301032837739938,0.0,0.0,0.12337254803692485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008438373018245,0.0,0.11930243991627415,0.08847529046013862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666562178276673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605524856313298,0.09114698857509536,0.0,0.11848517421463277,0.0,0.1959247339467326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307235208862896,0.07979002350064095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355009812696324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052178390559296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173366788214897,0.32954744556602505,0.08649301532918129,0.0,0.11323179245125342,0.0,0.0,0.08978612386838375,0.0,0.0,0.1106437414044285,0.0,0.08356005950336425,0.0,0.0,0.0768257818000023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187260877089933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208645807814246,0.0,0.08616932143972428,0.1898731510041164,0.12475175551891356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804042690811446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09759127146675182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022851552280248,0.0,0.15420863039736113,0.0,0.0,0.06989675740374067
mentalhealth,camille-j,2020/01/08,"I'm having terrible nightmares I'm 19 and diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I'm having very disturbing nightmares since December, even though I didn't change my pills or change my sleeping habits. The nightmares are so realistic and so close to my phobias that I wake up feeling like I didn't sleep at all. My bf told me that I kind of have spasms when I sleep and that sometimes I sit straight up in the bed, silently crying (but still asleep). I can't function normally during the day since I lack sleep and since I'm having terrifying flasbacks of the night before. What can I do to make it stop? Have you ever experience something similar?",6.246280487804878,7.228334065040653,6.331453252032522,77.05376524390246,66.07317073170732,9.727235772357725,34.07418699186992,9.827888789773867,3.352447967479676,522,23,94,11,8,166,79,123,0.21,0.7440000000000001,0.046,-0.9676,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,1,4,0,11,8,6,1,2,16,18,11,0,2,2,0,1,1,1,0,2,0,1,0,5,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,1,15,2,9,15,2,13,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,1,7,60,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610186811255582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12914312671558173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211001865351182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667096819638967,0.0978776051862489,0.0,0.13071728976283173,0.15404101155282302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002411284674256,0.1372825652602662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845792361189658,0.0,0.0,0.07673830461502823,0.10842286868536198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804269540429455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414602767910489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10130611215416288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14242369686038509,0.1487001137251312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3766314066462919,0.0,0.6075091827431869,0.0,0.0,0.11683818313370757,0.1501021269646886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120187397869488,0.12688458527842708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911098571754222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502053249209432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522423936985824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Positive-Possession,2020/01/08,"Started therapy and after my second session I'm a little unsure about a specific issue that has come up. So I decided that therapy was finally something I should do. I put aside all the voices in my head telling me I didn't need it or it's not worth it and just went. I've only been to two sessions so far and the Doctor has been great. I think he's definitely a good fit but one thing concerns me.

So the topic of socializing came up and I told him that ever since childhood I've never seen the appeal in forming relationships with other people. I've had, what I consider, a couple good friends that I have since distanced myself from since college. But even those friendships started because of circumstance and not because I wanted to find friends. I have also never had an interest in finding a significant other despite not being asexual. I don't consider myself socially awkward or inept. I'm actually pretty good at talking to people and I'm comfortable meeting strangers.

The thing is, I never really thought about why it was I felt this way. He asked me this and it genuinely caught me off guard. I didn't have an answer, I just have for as long as I can remember. But he kept asking the same question in a different way, stating that feeling this way was ""very unusual"" especially from a young age into adulthood. He couldn't accept that it's just how I've felt. I get that with a psychologist it's their job to find the reason for unhealthy behavior. But I'm struggling with this. I've been trying to think of an answer and I come up with nothing. And I know it's going to be the first thing we talk about in the next session, as he told me so.

Has anyone else run into something like this? I realize it's probably as simple as just telling him that I don't think there is an answer. But he's a pretty experienced psychologist and I trust his methods. But I don't know of spending more time on the topic is a good idea.",3.8671192341166223,5.493171033942558,5.379078328981726,79.23610226283726,72.34203655352479,8.135387293298521,29.21575282854657,8.745826893841286,2.4248869277632727,1538,63,285,29,30,519,184,383,0.05,0.802,0.14800000000000002,0.99,2,0,3,0,0,0,32.0,1,0,1,1,16,14,0,2,24,0,29,2,1,2,5,70,59,29,0,4,15,0,3,1,2,1,1,1,0,0,29,20,0,2,22,0,2,8,12,2,0,4,20,6,37,12,40,35,4,43,0,0,1,0,26,16,0,3,16,204,66,6,0.0,0.0,0.08717874354895916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144171650695894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062465589411664524,0.091534968392539,0.0,0.0,0.1670336155682602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891641105367277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217622647089708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390956781755138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884823832020737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333677863845527,0.0,0.09143886097980963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462850306773093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059005378627019,0.08080924333072292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045170807514169915,0.0,0.17155253818688151,0.097862878262777,0.2449535980166487,0.07598888960714158,0.0,0.0,0.13804106012471426,0.0,0.04667420919057694,0.0,0.050771529585039575,0.2997221425455168,0.0,0.09849291014736232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09168418806606966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084911648933144,0.0,0.09324324694317936,0.08865188448731078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981931143379423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04364490408063115,0.08953782756214665,0.0,0.07905927164221023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624127983934272,0.20670356723371314,0.0,0.09500951646835884,0.0,0.0,0.08572000094030223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06053617344302613,0.0679438154783138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386823371538973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177302059440112,0.09631898017226116,0.0,0.0,0.08980703997797647,0.10007641471716597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057230728574406135,0.09185196493114496,0.0,0.0959130947416359,0.10119991826259266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22169821002377185,0.0,0.0,0.1821329648937169,0.0,0.13754995258533434,0.0,0.0,0.1264645179374974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09339305676468766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360928224702266,0.15616665589328865,0.0,0.2043262872166212,0.0,0.17805198228611827,0.17172810277153314,0.0,0.07092255647488684,0.05209235742743962,0.0,0.0,0.17072815438562464,0.0,0.06065306723038572,0.0,0.08726798508057478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371129765064492,0.05269250271868233,0.2127315299898792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082815076736456,0.08061156211519557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dzedzezdzd,2020/01/08,"Obsessive behaviour  

So at first I want to give you guys disclaimer. This might sound very crazy, I realize it, I KNOW IT. But I do not know how to deal with this and I want some understanding from you guys.

I am 18 years old female who has got a boyfriend. When I first started dating him I got some kind of obsession about getting pregnant from holding his hand or sitting on his lap. I tracked my period like crazy, I wrote notes about how my flow was, how many pads I did use etc.. I was obsessed and scared about being pregnant. I love this boy so much but I dont know why I had this kind of behaviour. I was stressed and anxious like everyday. This, I think is the reason for my health problems. Since I was controling and checking everything about my body, I noticed blood from my ass. Like not much, but just a little. I didnt overthink it, didnt happen again, just two months later. My obsession about being pregnant ended, but I found a new thing to be scared about, to this day. I dont really know how I got rid of fear about being pregnant from unrealistic scenarios, but I replaced it with my ass. I was really scared about what is going down there, and since I didnt experience any pain or discomfort I wanted to know the anwer. I went to the doctor, was misdiagnosed with polyp, but it was just very small hemorrhoid. I was like okay this is really common, nothing to worry about. But then I started my obssesive behaviour again and I was like wiping my ass nonstop to check if it was bleeding. I was wiping it so much that I myself made there small tear which was bleeding. I had huge panic attacks because of that. Then it started to cause me pain, those little tears were so deep that I felt sharp pain everytime I tried to sit down. walk and I was unable to do something. My boyfriend knew all about it and told me that I need to stop doing that. I was affraid of it happening for no reason , so I did it because the reason was me. I realized this is not normal and stopped wiping my ass, just using wet wipes/shower. I thought this is end of my problem, but no. To this day there are random little tears on my ass, always on right side. They are very small and normal person wouldnt notice if there was something or not. They are quite itchy if I dont shower, but nothing serious. But everytime they itch I got huge panic attack. My boyfriend always takes photo of it so I can see the tear. But the problem is that I always do some kind of moves after my bowel movement to feel if it itch or if it does give me some kind of discomfort. Sometimes I do the moves like all day and I cant stop. I often feel there something only if I do the moves. I am like obsessed with doing that. There is no day that I wouldnt do that, because I am scared if it would do something. It really gives me anxiety and I want to just die because I cant stop it. I would really appreciate if you guys, would give me some tips about overcoming this. I cant afford therapist.

Edit: I also developed some kind of ""eating disorder"" like I am scared to eat anything because I dont want to poop or I just eat the same ""safe"" meals. I eat fiber, drink lot of water have physical activity. I lost 12kg because of my ass.

Edit2: Also I want to know if this problem is some kind of psychosomatic problem. I cant get over it and I dont see any reason for those tears to be there.

Edit3: My boyfriend says that I am overreacting about something this small, like it is no problem but he doesnt understand that it is very uncomfortable with this kind of ass",2.490684502820873,4.475587815232725,3.775884828984484,87.72272005024683,77.05359661495064,6.800784555712272,23.63101639633286,7.756953410329674,1.136557281382228,2767,89,567,42,64,904,253,709,0.213,0.698,0.08900000000000001,-0.9986,4,0,6,0,0,0,80.0,0,3,3,5,41,48,2,16,12,1,75,29,14,13,2,125,124,54,1,29,36,0,6,9,0,6,9,2,1,5,51,18,7,7,21,1,2,8,23,29,0,3,37,10,100,19,65,76,15,59,0,1,2,8,25,19,7,25,39,399,151,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391635009783322,0.1153639221895164,0.0,0.0,0.06285566521858367,0.0,0.035354402309167664,0.052209874880451534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038031065105547004,0.0,0.0,0.1051526286578106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16903366753636004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05133452469905815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047475607759862384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051834131126581126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11921958835176726,0.04764570821724733,0.0,0.0,0.04796394658789385,0.0,0.05296647448848934,0.04730308278687812,0.04044311948699535,0.0,0.270818591196809,0.04527317466611888,0.0,0.18915821822584966,0.0,0.0,0.08186566991231023,0.0,0.05154201982434393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04153512525110619,0.04520720676320504,0.0,0.052004802679919665,0.0467354563365508,0.0,0.04437371501130667,0.0,0.0,0.07862103043394764,0.0,0.05067243921663405,0.0,0.0,0.048290933585479236,0.17733482650818067,0.026265089497427795,0.0,0.14784965429193006,0.0,0.0,0.13728055666048902,0.08173566813717957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049124458650740416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3368811879023581,0.1523915641618071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20320514056562705,0.13895892482731115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05044920858624464,0.03929040013126519,0.04171090533309317,0.04372981698351985,0.0,0.04685482757638482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490268863171854,0.0,0.0,0.03688842822297116,0.14735791766478692,0.1019201828085274,0.034267889063503,0.0,0.04463480291274159,0.0,0.0,0.09056191307724072,0.08868921282529361,0.10523232777297208,0.04849494210374115,0.0,0.0,0.03514864351970342,0.14752827971977267,0.10844685488715124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04035321681713579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26532948496735137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04915541602547661,0.0,0.0,0.14803278730179348,0.1900671576490769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03946741755023424,0.0,0.036752078866558346,0.23134673844183146,0.0,0.07365485514146687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764591675070025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778930950351602,0.04570788627644369,0.0,0.0981337939498335,0.0,0.0,0.15455147269177402,0.05293920692297552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034747981354570134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053659258683808206,0.03070323918517072,0.029612750987165162,0.0,0.03668960357160821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04416048020730127,0.0,0.03137699911977833,0.0,0.04514540840378551,0.09622303615901599,0.0,0.07982996471616269,0.0,0.152529092236465,0.1635530752444519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04284183320843458,0.041701912681924594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04693364725690041,0.0,0.0984895799700161,0.0,0.0,0.029760990074384906
mentalhealth,tempe1991,2020/01/08,"How to permanently forget trauma? Right after the multiple traumatic incidents happened I told everyone about it because I wanted them to understand. Now after some time to process what actually happened Im so traumatized I cant see myself living in a world where something like that was possible. Nothing in my worst nightmares could have prepared me. Its better just to not accept the possibility of it being real at this point, people don't fully believe me anyway. But the memories are still there. How do I block them? I know time helps gradually but if I catch myself thinking about it Im just as terrified of it now as I was years ago when it happened. I also think my empathy is more limited now for people and their normal problems and concerns.",4.204069886947586,7.022844848920865,5.6001284686536525,72.59634892086335,75.33093525179856,8.287975334018501,30.072456320657764,9.04235418022936,3.2744816032887982,610,28,94,15,14,204,99,139,0.16399999999999998,0.774,0.063,-0.9392,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,3,2,16,6,0,0,4,0,10,0,0,2,0,24,20,12,0,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,2,5,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,1,17,3,16,15,3,19,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,2,12,79,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.15396179667231644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985452611137136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616946038673446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961757743360148,0.0,0.0,0.17775395833092147,0.0,0.13953568222142826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12596735416672358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15075700980364282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41854928427477056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575061643840383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3408396388064584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670684899140353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707897102315046,0.0,0.13931473725920268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15458214169696616,0.1513855880259375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21875717677368955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14914464864767332,0.35572633121535496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15096559781749933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17957800776540506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473562394734526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12572310883535334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214598706640964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599617302206548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021866505947452,0.0,0.0,0.18399514872386225,0.0,0.0,0.15075700980364282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16424523847413525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305745941581776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101599390481002
mentalhealth,Sirhagridofthebutt,2020/01/08,"Things seem to be getting stranger So over the past few months, a selection of perculiar things seem to be ocuring which I just can not find an explanation for. For context I do have depression but to my knowledge that's about it.

Recently, sometimes when I look at people there face just seem to be horrific, with features being over exaggerated and unbearable to look at. As well as thing sometimes the specific odours (I.e perfume and aftershave) can cause me to to get severely agitated. 

I also seem to have strange episodes where i feel hazy and off centre  it's hard to explain but it's a very jarring experience

On top of this I seem to be struggling to hold food down and no matter how hungry I seem to be I almost always end up throwing it back up 

I have spoke to my GP but he just tells me to try exercise and take my medication (150mg Sertraline) but I just feel like things are getting worst.
(Sorry for nay bad grammar or spelling, and if my explanation don't really make much sense)",4.904955357142857,6.357423989583335,5.6762797619047625,78.79312500000003,69.52083333333334,9.235714285714286,31.943452380952376,9.606745405546679,3.0417264880952377,794,35,150,18,14,259,121,192,0.18600000000000005,0.769,0.044000000000000004,-0.9855,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,13,6,0,1,5,0,14,4,1,3,0,35,31,18,0,1,11,0,3,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,11,7,1,1,11,1,0,1,3,4,1,0,1,8,16,2,32,24,3,18,0,1,2,0,4,11,0,9,7,107,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931277089622727,0.0,0.0,0.09528521587629817,0.09914338948117483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161996061634073,0.09948632128798396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240116099535472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262480166159894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553264629716766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165527910914181,0.0,0.0,0.1204929096258526,0.08512168064840557,0.0,0.0,0.10890208880698253,0.0,0.14407817095874048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18675483944229213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673612112553976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05821128481449879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20011409101127936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953438818836969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003235444383566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951053952721124,0.0,0.08758988242076803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137433555022889,0.08260447793577991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633134523634982,0.0,0.11764749016958435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6508249673186022,0.0,0.13460700351881072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356872765138274,0.13338007533685886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456276263048364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895869154863169,0.0,0.1041434490030914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31663519857118794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089588110671977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831226421441908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713128807384524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,obliviousbruhhaha,2020/01/08,"I can’t stand my brain anymore (ranting) For the past 2 1/2 months I have completely fallen into the darkest period of my life I’ve possibly ever had, a couple months prior I was enjoying life quite a bit, but would still often be sad and not really tell anyone what was up or why I was like that, but generally most of the time I would be laughing and happy and be good with my friends and shit, all of that just seemingly came crashing down, however and honestly I don’t know what’s up, I started to lose feelings for a girl I really liked and I didn’t want to, and procedurally it just got worse and worse and now it’s so low to the point where I don’t know if I can ever go back to how I once was, all of the past activities I’ve done I don’t enjoy but I don’t not enjoy either, I just sorta do em, I feel more calm with my friends but I don’t feel the same attachment that I used, and they’ve been great to me they’ve always been supportive and shit so it just confuses me and it gets me super stressed out, nothing people say to me anymore makes me feel confident in myself or uplifted or anything like that, and I don’t know what happened but I wish I could go back but that seems almost impossible going through this, I’ve never been diagnosed with any mental stuff and I’ve never talked to a therapist before so I don’t really know why I’m like this. It’s just all so confusing",5.9980936073059326,4.7690156815068505,7.1561095890410975,78.42907305936075,66.84246575342465,10.800365296803653,30.768036529680373,10.047579312681364,2.660614337899544,1097,33,236,22,15,375,144,292,0.128,0.635,0.237,0.9901,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,3,18,25,2,3,10,0,27,6,3,3,7,71,51,29,0,6,18,0,4,4,2,2,3,1,0,1,16,20,0,0,10,0,0,5,13,8,0,0,12,5,32,17,23,33,8,31,0,3,0,0,6,9,2,12,20,161,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212107015960273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485788199382116,0.0,0.0,0.06935181970927834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20227912217179506,0.07130876407226411,0.0,0.08392317737405543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568369983504795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677987464854918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111338834099119,0.0,0.0,0.11384656302118125,0.0,0.11664118590461685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692705412745376,0.0,0.0,0.08142498918687409,0.11284205867139956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351042299548743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436384001696128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844986118534138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062623269111496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15758335879690485,0.0,0.05328181808221032,0.0,0.1738775728621316,0.0855383570030827,0.08156498330640136,0.11243642713755377,0.0,0.0,0.09018307738458477,0.10856261603182822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22418837922748092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406697383563702,0.1992946322834924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409269756017358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807432913740506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277470330901116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16280343956788024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573108869228813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785527329363253,0.0,0.0,0.10860838272309094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947082965249476,0.07070205161955445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964067355685161,0.114970314587858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108471290155896,0.0,0.0,0.19599843177821846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110083756590827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856826715472912,0.0,0.0,0.20936781339713265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218397007099747,0.0,0.08144361762437773,0.0,0.1168209841167633,0.0,0.11674593808945335,0.0,0.1157289038773982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196993354894883,0.08913748614184598,0.0,0.0,0.11840992282976423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059467006727190075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880804188634457,0.0,0.0,0.060152113829922624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18404727846194732,0.0,0.11727521839765423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20785842732610435,0.1448913489780106,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Diracco,2020/01/08,"Existential dread, lack of motivation and lack of passion I'm a young man. I have a job that I like, I earn enough to afford most of the things I want and I'm soon going to buy something that I really wanted my whole life. The problem is that I'm crushed by existential dread. As soon as I get out of work it hits me. It seems to me like everything I do is for nothing. It seems to me that I have everything I've ever wanted and that my life is over. I have no goal to reach and, when I set one, I lack the motivation to reach it. But the worst thing is that it seems to me that I have no feelings, no passion towards anything. When I go tomuseums and look at painting and sculptures I feel nothing. When I'm on the beach at sunset I feel nothing. When I'm on the top of a mountain and there is a view of the whole countryside I feel nothing. It's the same with people, I tend to be very sociable and friendly, but deep inside I feel nothing. I don't know what love means, and, if it wasn't for the tenacity of others, I wouldn't have any friend. I would never kill myself, but life seems just so short and empty. I feel like I'm stuck here, incapable of being happy or to even feel something. How can I deal with this?",2.3321984435797667,3.5400265291828816,3.976363813229572,89.44127723735409,75.53696498054475,7.007704280155642,24.134046692607,7.554174236665415,0.9176834241245136,946,29,214,12,20,317,120,257,0.142,0.7290000000000001,0.129,-0.503,2,0,2,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,0,6,13,14,1,2,13,0,18,6,0,3,2,48,48,23,1,10,6,0,7,3,2,2,3,0,0,1,19,13,0,0,15,1,1,2,7,5,0,1,2,9,30,9,31,41,9,22,0,0,2,3,5,10,0,7,12,153,49,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134928203257976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863403220943978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816804058671556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108410534778413,0.0,0.06929875222932846,0.09490625874657144,0.0,0.0,0.1885908839239218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37135536954979215,0.07495495739018469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16212205472868582,0.0,0.05481643425497063,0.0,0.11925704845512418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168942274218777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411703340779953,0.0,0.11607857174942933,0.0,0.05766135612945019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22232455884075286,0.15377601827157025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810647916411259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946945080636968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428877318120728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092086757713655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5033684423761756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109659122531183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273840315124007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039438868218142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721451792473797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3820613606485687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615452744337136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940853632323466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657009024013425,0.1856538221707024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342791425663533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638309970216049,0.0,0.0,0.0745322456256324,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bradstreetboys,2020/01/08,Travel advice I am about to go on a vacation out of the country and I am super anxious for the plane ride and everything we’re doing on the trip. Any advice or tips would be super helpful!,3.064615384615383,4.387297512820513,5.213333333333335,80.84000000000002,73.87179487179488,7.2512820512820495,25.82051282051281,7.793537801064563,1.6060358974358984,149,5,28,2,3,52,31,39,0.046,0.706,0.248,0.8718,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,6,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,7,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,21,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7069341031105311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24598092799378485,0.0,0.0,0.4086388531207799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250891902289345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055729126706291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424522307905159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569543858350566,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notgoodgonnabehonest,2020/01/08,"I just dont know what to do This is a throw away obviously, Its just really bubbling over rn and I'm so worried. I dont even know if this is the right place to post this or anything I just need to get this out. I cant build up the courage to tell anyone I'm depressed, but recently I've been thinking about self harming and I'm just so scared. I used to think I'd never get this bad and if I did I just wouldn't do it, but I was thinking about it last night and all of today. I'm worried because I cant stop wanting to do it, I dont know what to do I'm just so lost. There is a knife in my room from christmas and I've just been looking at it, I want to but it makes me feel sick why do I feel like this. I'm so sorry if I'm doing this wrong or posting this wrong or anything i just needed to get this out I cant get the idea out of my head and I'm terrified.",-0.2638308457711425,1.0028272189054732,2.2674875621890567,98.6948631840796,82.78109452736321,5.262686567164178,20.12189054726368,5.82211442006289,-0.34091840796019923,665,18,177,4,18,230,92,201,0.23600000000000002,0.72,0.044000000000000004,-0.9929,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,16,9,0,1,5,0,20,2,1,2,3,46,48,19,0,8,17,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,17,9,0,1,9,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,5,3,17,2,22,42,1,20,0,2,1,0,2,11,0,6,7,112,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693550320773873,0.0,0.204628526401388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681357401967807,0.0,0.10381164207546162,0.07579135242069626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070865727090253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4371469146465219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211980918161578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573152414090466,0.08882247659710503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598323909866679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760002908462634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14035517430687547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20498808752719413,0.10134679892864353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06074210992707981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440717940602152,0.0,0.13572256236407354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299226800638666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438052214656744,0.09589214798925172,0.0,0.0,0.1166767272868021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12989999606420438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23815049268577734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964996783705093,0.0,0.1227623956986778,0.0,0.0,0.10617845532013202,0.0,0.0,0.12447756076180608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297049113057989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917897919641414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394673414454714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867124557875084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389998904991632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785176165533966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738253055237572,0.0,0.0,0.14666792652622865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218987578363862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525294269347532,0.0,0.0,0.2718740409055406,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jansel61,2020/01/08,"Why are the weeks between therapy sessions the longest and what support do you have during these weeks? [Might not be the best place to post this so I took a chance.]

Lordy, the weeks between sessions can be long! Knowing I have support the weeks between session is helpful. One thing I have done right in life is to have treated enough people well so that when I really need support, like this morning, I can go to a friend’s house with a 2-month supply of sleeping pills and say, “Hold onto these. I don’t want them around me right now because I’m feeling extremely poorly about myself,” and they take them from you, pull out a chair from the kitchen table, says nothing while you cry it out, then pours a cup of coffee for you and reminds you that they’re here for you. 

I have 8 wonderful friends that have come together to form a support team for me. One has taken the lead role, coordinating people to be with me if I want support at appointments; one helps me work through panic attacks; one acts as liaison between support team and my psychotherapist (with my permission, of course) to learn about how to best support me and if there are hot-button issues to steer clear of when chatting with me or if a session was particularly stressful, how to support me when through the tough times; one works in the mental health field and helps me understand all the jargon I read about; others meet up with me for coffee or a meal just to check in with me. Then there’s always a couple that provide the much needed humor and comic relief. I’m not directly involved with the group because I have good days and not so good days. My gift to them is to allow them safe space to talk about what they’re feeling and experiencing and lean on each other. 

I’m very fortunate to have these people in my life. My wish is that everyone has a great support system outside of sessions.",10.019535747446607,7.284905011142065,8.929515320334264,73.67024326833798,60.16991643454038,11.356063138347261,39.5322191272052,9.029198982220553,3.4709151717734463,1485,56,279,16,15,462,185,359,0.046,0.741,0.213,0.9953,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,6,5,7,19,26,1,2,22,0,26,7,1,4,2,52,53,28,0,8,9,0,2,1,2,1,4,2,1,0,16,23,2,2,6,5,2,6,4,4,1,5,4,5,37,22,54,45,7,38,0,0,0,0,26,15,0,7,16,203,53,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05905195397224621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317752131113161,0.0,0.08073756599607894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865241764120966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895532739564538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061133572381451985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07852592945086931,0.0779561942690588,0.09153836195478886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262600164233665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333002366577299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781399058996686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176819140885754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966105954829704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040333359684089694,0.11905098270011975,0.0,0.07824365355494135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543680596407422,0.0,0.0,0.14270722105813138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818887817828482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407327389600288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039002746533956766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025511016740077,0.034671904294575284,0.0,0.0,0.06280539636227571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715201335069487,0.07528697133187638,0.0,0.0,0.056646837005582186,0.0,0.052170434480937,0.1052453368071033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680967396157486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404524028852053,0.0,0.0,0.08326691605600868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760305819152936,0.0,0.07414757631584838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796875429598853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098827826591039,0.0,0.04546460544797536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121440119300912,0.0,0.1128749107219374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102032604264294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129483337279053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7248137674437609,0.0,0.0,0.05335991070607896,0.057042252638276565,0.0,0.0,0.08115932002224882,0.0,0.04714869864210452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04138263720012456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884925142367895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388130787973969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058556917729744626,0.08371879603303198,0.0,0.22770843837458615,0.0,0.06380971969417472,0.0,0.06403854987356074,0.0,0.08161093155032621,0.0,0.07696293235964981,0.10333266080225716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ayeeeariba,2020/01/08,"Boyfriend says he feels 'empty'- how can I help? Hi,

So my boyfriend has told me that he hasnt felt right since before Christmas. Says he feels empty, neither happy or sad.

Is there anything I can do to help him find his zest for life again?

I understand a lot of this may be  for him to work out but is there anything that I can do to help him?",1.1136904761904738,3.045437750000005,1.8603174603174608,100.04500000000002,81.22222222222223,4.669841269841268,21.3968253968254,5.288315135182226,-0.3066174603174603,266,8,63,1,7,82,49,72,0.047,0.8220000000000001,0.131,0.7326,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,1,0,11,1,0,1,0,11,16,4,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,5,10,1,7,12,2,3,0,1,0,0,14,2,0,3,1,41,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37677578495099606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19480050929747206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315053259404849,0.0,0.2198063774729561,0.0,0.2092356607799173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24369766583915664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4603359939351363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616983199721461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946260420186993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955029025115222,0.0,0.3641048002494345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18937125987794634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21875011320011706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23832168438199644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16666200478037746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Qwerty177,2020/01/08,"Where can I go to get help in Toronto I’ve been having an extremely rough go of things for a few years now, but I’m a student and have no idea where to go. I’m taking some time off from school so I’m not able to use their services. 

Where can I find a therapist in downtown Toronto that’s not gonna make me have to take another year off to pay for it?",2.8059493670886084,2.7199906075949407,4.313772151898736,92.27648101265824,73.30379746835443,7.838987341772152,25.92658227848101,7.554174236665415,0.9589118987341774,274,8,69,3,5,92,55,79,0.062,0.912,0.026000000000000002,-0.3716,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,4,0,6,0,0,2,0,9,18,3,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,13,16,2,14,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,1,4,42,7,4,0.24919371003122606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613013325675772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277585364438404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301934284002262,0.0,0.42486758424614096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16702929105596395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813093666626202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166338736466714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25219733836883873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3747253148072454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893331039497761,0.16555322814100756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453068562819397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21522335609994334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209451582467949
mentalhealth,emergencyflight,2020/01/08,"I felt like I had a mental illness for a long time Idk but I feel like I have one but I’m not sure and maybe I’m just feeling symptoms that are temporary and will go away but yeah

-I always misplace my phone and stuff even if it was in the same minute I immediately forget where it is

-I procrastinate a lot especially for homework when even it was given a week before I’d wait until the last day to do it but I can’t bring myself to do it before that even if I try and I stress myself out to finish it and cry for no reason while doing it sometimes and I tell myself I’ll do it earlier next time but I don’t 

-I lose interest in a lot of things very fast even when I’m really motivated and excited but when I actually start the most I can go on is a week on a hobby before I lose all interest

-I feel physically painful almost when I need to sit still for prolonged periods of time (anything more than 15mins without getting up)

-have random headaches and body aches sometimes

-sleep too much and too late

-I can never focus on things like school and try to listen but don’t realise I’m already thinking of something else

-feel useless and empty like I haven’t accomplished anything in my life and never will and life is kind of meaningless 

-cry randomly at the smallest things at least once 
every three days

-can’t listen to things or forget them immediately or after 5-10mins like instructions or hw assignments or errands and never get them done


By the way these have been going on for a few years or so but idk I thought about adhd but I’m not sure if everyone goes through this because I never asked anyone. Any ideas?",3.5884545028142583,5.211929454268294,4.727560975609759,83.63770168855537,73.0548780487805,7.485178236397751,25.72514071294559,8.139509932561175,1.5523410881801123,1303,43,257,20,26,428,178,328,0.15,0.7390000000000001,0.111,-0.9002,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,4,15,16,0,1,13,1,25,7,2,2,7,64,50,38,0,4,21,0,5,5,0,2,5,2,1,0,17,15,0,1,10,0,0,4,13,5,0,2,8,7,29,11,34,40,9,47,0,3,0,0,7,13,0,14,33,182,46,7,0.0,0.0,0.08982385493698164,0.0,0.1106216962964503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217101590093484,0.0,0.10157531757205086,0.0,0.07658984750500747,0.0,0.0,0.06259460136083954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06436087300014086,0.0,0.15149242960559922,0.0,0.08605081149154789,0.0,0.08648047488961688,0.0,0.0,0.056110535140068384,0.0,0.2349737187520189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224262517663066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20221695065142448,0.11872442334881092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419526394163454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689282456743991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431827004856305,0.0,0.0775529293033295,0.08795412934909204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861653837330424,0.06575785409746589,0.08837882766408271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618072536863884,0.0,0.15693600260988327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390900397610307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958519971992673,0.0,0.07502997295858065,0.10383217089279242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300299665431524,0.22484572346901505,0.0,0.0,0.08145802816514787,0.0,0.20595240188070926,0.0,0.15650884768918455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247282253678717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09276096302265363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766457927950864,0.06825112256622064,0.2839669470227467,0.0,0.0978922232355174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802624429316667,0.062372916153954586,0.0,0.09794369185759427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05896717998141648,0.09463886766179937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931557116146763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211271728482363,0.0,0.0,0.0708616945177417,0.1820721750741849,0.0,0.06515080426407857,0.0,0.07350824823275019,0.0,0.10543865989418978,0.0,0.10537092589408896,0.0,0.0,0.17350498863565575,0.09567128992704886,0.0,0.0,0.08045247312536982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446057341814987,0.05897951558681085,0.0,0.07307443495079119,0.16101871281019167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498671328809732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594778999848588,0.0,0.07306202296741407,0.14766788732265854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872929317820599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05927476237286735
mentalhealth,FlavioSkotiXx,2020/01/08,"I can't remember anything easily This has made me really sad. I used to remember everything in details. Now I can't remember a sentence. First I noiced when I read something and couldn't remember it an hour later. I thought this was normal at first , cause I haven't read in a long time and I would get used to it again. Now when I meet new people I can't remember their names. I meet him 3 times a week. And always ask my friend what his name is. Today I forgot it again. It's been months and I still can't study. I have also started to stutter and mispronounce alot of words. I didn't have this problems before.",1.8376190476190464,3.874123158730161,3.395476190476192,89.42035714285716,79.3174603174603,7.057142857142857,22.404761904761905,8.07648339933343,1.1596476190476197,482,15,102,9,12,159,76,126,0.109,0.861,0.03,-0.7633,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,8,4,0,0,5,0,14,0,0,4,0,24,22,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,6,2,0,0,7,3,0,2,6,0,20,1,7,14,1,22,0,1,0,0,9,3,0,1,19,69,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234550208626517,0.10648955225286924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531657604713757,0.0,0.11964395654570115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890149245720046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13147063962445668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502010698347467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21771932254911971,0.0,0.0,0.09887697481070487,0.0,0.06686423013959449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260344493666562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132582088786777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109770218348538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021523574325894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236038118381048,0.0,0.0,0.12539315660899505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872516781498059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12245950691257484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560291221283474,0.0,0.0819872189120738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7248815504499504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852520101414944,0.0,0.0,0.09058485166121333,0.0,0.10220493572188594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160176723856784,0.14925225026610814,0.0,0.12131000732827953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22106713357980065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265777851358787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091326884110806,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MZCleveland2019,2020/01/08,"I want to get away from my family. Is it wrong of me to want to move across country to get away from my family? I'm 31 and I got divorced last year. I moved in with my mom at the end of last year to get my stuff together. Long story short, any time mess up or don't do something right, my mother will tell anyone who will listen about how I'm a fuck up. No one ever stands up for me. What should I do?",0.20899999999999969,1.5607089555555549,2.433055555555556,97.65625000000004,81.66666666666667,5.833333333333334,15.694444444444445,6.6274283507984215,-0.6428888888888888,306,4,79,3,8,104,61,90,0.129,0.8420000000000001,0.028999999999999998,-0.8767,0,0,1,0,1,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,2,0,7,1,0,1,1,8,17,3,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,1,1,11,0,20,13,0,21,0,0,0,1,6,10,1,1,8,50,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142837879100833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485480051112614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33553001807253097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15815305655459988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16151967908315953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3366649891411791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507782170845275,0.27987404580941266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14281245583072874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911039539839142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158021875442351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20912982100684724,0.0,0.37956659343971977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12099832772128735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15249109245846654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13746585962054364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20441093041342584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560711813631366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412102016510763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21064115386845414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19522966963394395,0.0,0.2299763283631209
mentalhealth,andhjsiak,2020/01/08,"Is it possible for a manipulator to make you feel like youre being the manipulator? Sorry mobile 

Im in a situation with a bf/ex rn. Im gonna keep it simple tho. 
We were together around ten months before i eventually ended things bc i felt like i had lost myself in the relationship and was doing majority of the effort and wasnt getting treated how i was treating him. During this time hed cry and beg and please and even pulled the suicide card and once sat behind my car in his driveway so i wouldnt leave. I eventually just had to give him the cold shoulder and be mean to get him to back off but i still loved him so it was hard. About two months ago i had somebody extremely important pass very suddenly and turning my whole families life upside down. I called my ex needing someone to talk to and he had reached out a few times during our breakup with very (seemingly) heartfelt  and apologetic letters and such that seemed to show he finally heard what I had been telling him and changed for the better.(thinking about what he wants to say before speaking not just acting out on emotions, being more open to communication and telling me things not waiting till he decides to pick a fight until eventually telling me, realizing im not “coming at him” everytime i try to talk to him and majority of the time an argument was never my intention but a calm conversation was)  so i reached out needing someone to talk to about everything with my family. He let me talk for almost two hours and just listened and was supportive. About a week or two after that i asked to get back together. I made my intentions extremely clear that i was looking for a serious relationship, im not dating just for fun but for a future, i needed a secure stable and healthy relationship where we had each others back and could trust each other. I was looking for someone i could rely on. He said he wanted all the same. We got back together spent xmas and new years together. Then his work started picking up and he said he needed a break from us bc he was neglecting me and didnt have the time or energy. I understood said ok. Then a few days later something happened to where we needed to communicate briefly. He then decided to reiterate what he said before. I said i know and i really dont wanna hear about how you dont have time for me even though i understand it hurts. I then come to find out he felt like the relationship was rushed he wasnt expecting me to “jump back in so quickly” and that i was too sad to handle bc he doesnt know how to console people. I cried to him 5 times maybe and also made it clear from the start i was in a vulnerable spot and needed a shoulder to cry on too. Heck! Even his mom told him when we got back together that i was vulnerable and the last thing i needed was someone i loved to hurt me. He says he didnt expect it to be serious so quickly and we could ease back into it. But in the same conversations says he fucked up he misses us he wants us back he sorry and if i say ok but that doesnt make everything immediately better right away and hes well give me a fucking break i was stressed from work and thats why i made the mistake. 

Im just so confused and feel like im at fault for all this but i dont know how much lore clearer i couldve made myself. I made my intentions known from the start in not only a handwritten letter but also within the first week of us being together verbally i said it. And he made no indication of feeling any other way. He even says that he decided i needed space bc of how sad i was and that he was busy with work and i will find someone better cuz he doesnt have the energy so thats why he broke up with me. And like i never said any of that all i ever asked for was to feel loved secure and heard and i love him! But now im just so hurt and feel manipulated but also at fault for this for some reason idk im so confused",3.6188741380421448,4.909933840304183,5.134422461386438,82.06989044274022,72.44740177439796,8.441674722347534,26.680866146806732,8.937865541717454,1.967827891989432,3076,105,631,61,59,1037,303,789,0.11800000000000001,0.7509999999999999,0.131,0.9189,0,0,1,0,1,1,40.0,11,3,0,8,55,43,3,3,34,2,54,9,2,23,8,164,132,77,1,20,23,2,8,5,0,3,1,17,1,0,31,60,0,5,23,1,1,8,19,20,1,5,54,28,90,23,90,65,15,91,0,9,2,6,101,31,3,9,54,427,121,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03756976751994996,0.0,0.04244022101067283,0.0,0.0,0.10168045525546426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057643472622331125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03772965011036657,0.0792443355897089,0.0,0.0398200066642214,0.2607178660482919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819384443211083,0.0,0.0,0.112452345037915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04327754586282303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04483534988485335,0.07301800539435056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151757707244216,0.0,0.13966644493169353,0.027333379788847038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14901686897736696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04767491060009496,0.03753855349305764,0.0,0.0,0.1119736769059278,0.038337641051859515,0.0,0.0,0.07618179990462864,0.0,0.07990940535349551,0.0,0.10715000742015936,0.06055651733476716,0.08138820955948244,0.046428251824921586,0.07747416613955113,0.03605076169028287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836437405281313,0.06642974261017869,0.08131482803707482,0.0,0.0,0.06779474427452435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03747894268677997,0.0,0.03796663623150411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047768460988750115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04173849014120694,0.0,0.13611489250109673,0.0,0.3662453078235037,0.0,0.0,0.03767175248928999,0.0,0.0,0.06987738437010596,0.0345476135166985,0.0,0.04487723281976723,0.0,0.043339252859175635,0.029936203177108583,0.10353040057175762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118170323322145,0.0,0.046265799015037336,0.0,0.15300841515300273,0.24062160500280294,0.05658165487747949,0.0,0.042579188127427066,0.04616726041407464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0496381868544467,0.06765904377774329,0.0,0.031156211864942825,0.25141028967719514,0.06537640858990013,0.04093354243816148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0451362657987803,0.0,0.03223400569215636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0293828755608642,0.0,0.0,0.04652355309422079,0.0,0.04778020395937317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027151487116917592,0.043576545408629326,0.0,0.1820129305420604,0.0,0.036194653180735226,0.2822100323639644,0.16852239528377924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716736228873325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04764000816422639,0.0,0.0,0.1795539133321477,0.03262832623821865,0.0,0.09488808001349458,0.08999622619856151,0.0,0.03384693409974314,0.0,0.048549318733647526,0.0,0.0,0.04635987032297924,0.048095464042861316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362626572796615,0.11113322469936933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447168546697717,0.027157167056691717,0.041640855388230674,0.0,0.1482824007465297,0.0,0.0,0.04049855208701147,0.0,0.0287751180970256,0.04610028219203765,0.1242054206712064,0.04412195727450452,0.20392501078760655,0.0,0.0,0.06994044627374485,0.07499536583032015,0.03364146930480407,0.06799380166199513,0.0,0.03810719932878381,0.0,0.07648771367290064,0.04731884805210883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256548190239187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02729311368514589
mentalhealth,cbdbun,2020/01/08,"Endless Cycle I know this is pretty cliche with major depression, but I feel like such a failure. Specifically when it comes to my mental health treatment. I've been in therapy since age 14 (I'm now 21) I've been in psychiatric inpatient 6 times, I've been in intensive outpatient, I was homebound one year of high school, and had a crisis counselor visit me weekly at school for a whole other year, and...well. I feel like there's no other options.

I'm a whole new person, but I'm just not recovering. Just evolving, and getting better at hiding it. 

I'm at the point in therapy where I know everything my therapist is trying to convey to me or do (It also doesn't help I'm in college for mh counseling), and I've tried 10+ medications since age 14. I just feel hopeless.

I've considered residential treatment, but I'm very low-income and there's not many options around me.

Suicide is always an option in my mind, but I'm saving that for if/when my boyfriend leaves me and whenever my cat dies tbh. 

​

Just not sure what to do and needed to vent. (I suffer from MDD/GAD/SAD/PTSD/BPDAnorexia/ADD/Chronic Fatigue/Dermatillomania, and I'm a cancer survivor in case anyone needs insight on the weight I'm carrying)",4.377329598506068,5.925601168067228,5.580952380952382,78.60015873015874,70.93277310924371,8.482166199813259,29.188608776844074,8.998388855275968,2.5057135387488327,970,38,178,19,18,323,141,238,0.184,0.752,0.065,-0.9859,1,0,0,0,0,2,45.0,0,0,0,1,12,8,0,0,8,0,11,4,0,0,1,36,29,14,2,2,12,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,8,10,1,0,6,0,0,2,5,3,0,1,5,4,16,5,23,24,3,26,0,3,0,0,3,15,0,4,11,96,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294412028742107,0.1071124089775134,0.1394772561130002,0.1564191952699541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000994747365394,0.0,0.0,0.11459564071400515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384988103270315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088818856453199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087365263924727,0.0,0.13359984037275469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156928588693482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19526696457940101,0.1839273060600079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725531860319987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683235640566369,0.0,0.0,0.0862839877870206,0.1360087085740362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14149161397622625,0.0,0.0,0.1363048751687149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257804676395702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051047568462468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968040236473075,0.12972803226669,0.0,0.12997907012694154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909010760991384,0.0,0.12432676975995052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722975070247706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240074490987033,0.0,0.0,0.12169002390554348,0.0,0.0,0.13096314458832445,0.0,0.0,0.15047670635876878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26056019188209323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21297106057047244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408080654747525,0.0,0.12132507053997013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944244751882624,0.14946368897188614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506261287189707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17479637819613886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621447891934052,0.0,0.0,0.1032582232176128,0.1567566110256442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874415052627363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564191952699541,0.16579384333967725
mentalhealth,throwaway808th,2020/01/08,"Suicidal for the first time in my life Im in my 20s and miserable. I didnt have the best childhood. My mom had 7 kids, me being the oldest. My dad was constantly in trouble with gambling bookies and the law. My step father was violent. We were poor, I was overweight, etc. My parents ruined me. Im constantly stressed out and depressed. I cant afford to see a psychiatrist. The littlest thing sets me into a panic attack.

My little brother fell off a chair the other night and hurt himself. I couldnt stop crying. I couldnt breathe, I kept rocking back and forth. My parents ruined me.

I see a missed payment notification, and I get extremely nervous. I hear gunshots and I breakdown. I see strange people in pictures with my siblings, and I cry. I hear a knock at my door, and I instantly think its the cops coming to arrest me, or someone was coming to beat me up. Like what happened with my dad growing up.

Im a complete mess and I have NO idea what to do. I need to move as far away from my family as I can. I love my siblings (who I basically raised...) So much it hurts. The thought of not seeing them everyday is devestating",1.4704000000000017,3.882338351111114,3.443555555555559,86.40400000000002,83.26666666666667,5.911111111111111,26.33333333333333,7.24861992348623,1.4962,879,39,172,13,25,296,135,225,0.27,0.6779999999999999,0.053,-0.9942,3,0,0,1,0,0,35.0,1,0,1,3,2,17,2,4,14,0,16,4,1,0,0,29,32,14,1,3,2,7,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,1,7,18,1,2,3,1,2,6,6,14,0,1,9,6,41,3,24,20,3,30,0,7,4,1,15,13,0,1,11,121,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292056931076573,0.1097735410304342,0.08984153244672435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261471271169015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012919053155044,0.12250285970606138,0.2525216473375985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25668303461234354,0.0,0.0,0.10063275934954702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303057223756752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014486337556537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938269978097328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06104325176328813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331982833396088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633707802475469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501558887691435,0.1318963537834573,0.3786166272953978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252643088355943,0.05708134993996662,0.11710279070603866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545123510671987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683974458595202,0.0,0.12418074918629265,0.08588968179611617,0.08663420746658906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964494167396116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13708471082041207,0.2594704755054622,0.0,0.0,0.0810010486228967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724203722862824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899681352917188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768215022403033,0.13383801456759226,0.0,0.0,0.12780226708595094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762225413229105,0.07486534136737552,0.0,0.0927566539566907,0.06812942189127387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jericasears,2020/01/08,"I think my husband might be depressed? I think my husband might be depressed or something and he wont tell me he is. He keeps saying he is going to sign up for the war, which he knows he cant because his eye sight is too bad, he keeps talking about doing things that would in the end hurt or kill him. He speeds a lot in his car and he tells me he speeds all the time to and from work. I've asked him if he is depressed or suicidal and he says no and that he is just joking when he says things like that. I'm 21 weeks with our rainbow baby after 3 losses. I've been super sick and havent been able to work since getting pregnant and so idk if maybe he is feeling a lot of stress financially or what. He was also in a pretty bad accident at work 8 days before we found out I was pregnant. He had to have surgery and was out of work for a month. He has an mri today on his leg from it and may have to have surgery. He hates drs and absolutly refuses to go to a dr like ever unless he is dying. I'm terrified he may do something and end up killing himself before our baby is even here. Has anyone gone through something like this? What do I do?",2.847229291716688,3.457661012244902,4.142424969987996,91.03236494597841,73.57142857142857,6.744297719087635,25.024009603841527,6.522977012572876,0.6488103241296512,888,26,205,6,17,293,131,245,0.218,0.718,0.064,-0.9928,0,0,3,0,0,0,16.0,3,0,0,6,9,17,4,1,9,0,33,6,2,0,2,41,48,21,5,3,8,2,1,3,0,6,4,3,0,0,10,15,0,3,5,1,0,4,4,12,0,0,8,6,17,5,27,32,3,25,0,5,2,0,40,9,0,12,15,125,27,4,0.11212648261477244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966750763685112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840144371482513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482312528226356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18724185891405454,0.06835126308158003,0.0,0.1908227563990028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231230529406041,0.0,0.2897231255266771,0.0,0.11636958646554067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19862156538687628,0.0,0.0,0.07405848427701411,0.1014248228873385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669451863387171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294090074581752,0.0,0.0,0.05858145931631386,0.0,0.12744812805156205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070168796469182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003371869418696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993263392973713,0.248102680185492,0.0,0.06162178248422959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16433800703452114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19065185167623327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264612261013092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378969577063097,0.0,0.0,0.08949828867406864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140729430173637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675024382082317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275218510204007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589613329634776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844050699938173,0.0,0.0,0.12264817311601604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901230194500806,0.19600697596017247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14898370552487902,0.14369224518122625,0.0,0.0,0.06538185370996136,0.0,0.1062827949133169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994110098840033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265176590540681,0.0,0.0,0.07965143618358539,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beautifulchaos22,2020/01/08,"Why is my brain’s first instinct to harm myself- **TW self harm ** but I think I had a personal win today. So I’ve had a shit morning.. public transport was late AF and so I missed a support appointment and travelled 1.5 hours for nothing and I’m feeling overwhelmed that I don’t have any hat support to start my day.

My first instinct was to self harm. I hate that it’s the default thought.

But I’m proud of myself because this time last year, I would have given into the urges to SH, and it would have spiralled downwards extremely quickly.

Today, I acknowledged that I feel frustrated and like a failure because of this situation, and I acknowledge that there were many factors beyond my control, and that I tried my best and didn’t give into the urge to isolate and self harm.

I still deal with the strong urges to SH in response to minor inconveniences, but I think I did well handling it and although it’s hard to be proud to myself for it, I feel a little bit proud.",3.526708115183247,5.424791759162304,4.139970549738223,86.64304482984295,73.81675392670158,6.4503926701570675,29.214986910994764,7.1686216300943375,1.6384892670157067,770,33,148,8,16,244,105,191,0.187,0.624,0.18899999999999997,0.358,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,9,7,19,3,1,9,0,15,2,2,1,0,27,30,16,0,2,3,0,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,4,12,13,0,1,8,1,0,2,2,9,1,2,9,4,22,10,18,18,2,21,0,2,0,0,7,6,1,0,14,99,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421022801741853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16890230770068815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453865242334666,0.0,0.1512470327619711,0.0,0.0,0.15465362994346873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538154899922044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893452051116153,0.1428260450219894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21014611726658464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23567979682941004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289776174244988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410235864376823,0.13677706687937422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13643149846536295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292652572096873,0.15627629672026944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768240843853257,0.13885093674543075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14045524693239442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329304356878548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209655722951349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4335743750433512,0.0,0.14220671874463675,0.0,0.15572191707842128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805753198832612,0.0,0.11063619987363578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144213509667127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17753842954471105,0.0,0.1099832737854139,0.08078231092950562,0.0,0.2626346393674166,0.0,0.0,0.09405784606039573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456182025644093,0.0,0.1250085155845279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19682608303850346,0.0,0.0,0.08921358643430513
mentalhealth,JunkieJonathon,2020/01/08,"My Mother is the Devil She can't take responsibility for anything, she blames everyone else but herself. She just blames all her problems on other people's actions and puts herself on a pedestal. She has a victim complex

She prods me like a caged animal with her manipulative and aggressive taunts so she can use my reactions as part of the her victim case and shift more blame in other people.

Everything that's ever happened to her is someone else's fault and she is just a poor victim. Her dad died quite a few years ago and her mum a coupe years ago and she calls herself an orphan. She's also in her 50's.

She can be caring and kind but her mood changes like the weather. She never gave a shit about me, she just uses me for her guilt trip strategies to gain sympathy. She has ""aches and pains"" that a doctor had never even diagnosed. She uses this excuse as a reason she hasn't had a proper job in 20 years.

I kinda needed vent. Please tell me some of you people have insane mothers as well right?",3.716439393939394,5.476189772727274,4.612007575757578,84.03801136363639,72.98989898989899,6.7681818181818185,23.48611111111111,7.413659706084162,1.0044535353535349,797,22,152,9,16,258,116,198,0.21,0.647,0.142,-0.9341,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,2,9,16,5,1,14,0,13,4,1,5,4,28,21,15,1,2,5,4,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,9,0,0,2,0,1,3,4,10,1,0,3,0,35,5,16,17,5,17,1,0,0,0,36,6,1,2,10,108,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498448160715189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269848213229693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597010148896275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439012163221678,0.0,0.14368346305537785,0.0,0.14908103622859872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14303693729860106,0.14625895273172188,0.0,0.0,0.14424374642967708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23545120220395305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308030285440826,0.12747564743555426,0.0,0.13466084521243382,0.12665521402988544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246204083797058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398473232220625,0.0,0.0,0.1467527568480947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13769866355934224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449485339098023,0.21738165894806985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995521445527185,0.0,0.0,0.15260913955049385,0.0,0.2931010606969371,0.0,0.0,0.15469444360611018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348471625072892,0.0,0.14166956765836647,0.0,0.14989216235164698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448954131386343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035004557735487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144658527762641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940615397093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059588237416556,0.0,0.12317554742078468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3651444845536312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670941072825387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722551968839045
mentalhealth,bigdaddydora,2020/01/08,"Just venting about my current situation 23M with PDD and a shitty past.

​

So long story short, my relationship with family has always been pretty bad, and since my mum started therapy she turned her gaslighting up to the maximum. Since last summer she has kicked me out of the house twice (threatened about it multiple times) because of ridiculous arguments. My mum struggles with PTSD and Borderline Personality Disorder, so I understand her behaviour stems from this. But it has been so rough on me to be homeless twice in a year, having to move all my clothes and schoolbooks with me finding places I can sleep. She even reported me to the police when I talked back to her and got mad, I guess because I'm a guy and it comes across as a lot more intense. I was in a limbo where I wasn't able to change my living situation, because my mum started up some kind of family therapy to better things, even though I only moved back in with her for a while. I've managed to keep going to school, start up my own therapies (apparently I have a form of generalised dysthymia) and I've just tried to focus on working on myself. Then a week before Christmas my mum kicked me out again and I had nowhere to stay this time around, so I had to search like crazy for a place to rent. Eventually found a place for the holidays, and now I have a permanent place to stay. It's just a painful realisation to know I now have almost no family left, and that it is on me to ""fix"" the problems between her and I. Now that I have some time to relax and think about my situation everything is really sinking in, and for the first time in about 5 years I'm really starting to feel proper emotions. I'm happy on one side, extremely mad on the other, sad and anxious/nervous. I just have no idea how I'm still alive and how I'm still able to keep going. How did I manage to keep everything going and find a place to stay? Hell, I don't even know how I'm still alive. I tried committing suicide when I was 9, my dad used to beat me and just use me for the money he got for me. When I ran away from home he tried to kidnap me to bring me back (which luckily didn't work). Now currently I don't have many friends either, because I cut out a lot of people from my life because my ex was paranoid about it and I was so focused on building up my life with her that I didn't stay in contact with anyone else myself. 

  
Life throws you curveballs sometimes, I just really needed to vent. Hopefully I can keep things going and keep the suicidal thoughts away, since I started feeling things again the thoughts have been very strong when I think about my situation. Thank you for reading. Remember to stay strong and keep working on yourself, no matter what!",6.7475592371412025,6.2193216741154576,6.947552815770887,78.2332960893855,65.03351955307261,10.237436588968087,33.22860078340718,9.668497473035632,2.9043416040583065,2157,79,426,38,29,697,241,537,0.11199999999999999,0.802,0.087,-0.9405,4,0,0,0,0,1,56.0,0,2,0,8,43,20,5,1,24,0,31,5,1,6,2,78,74,38,2,3,8,6,3,1,1,0,4,0,2,2,17,32,0,6,14,3,2,10,8,10,0,4,19,3,67,10,81,54,9,86,1,1,0,0,25,34,1,7,38,295,84,8,0.11676026092969415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05845926766817065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048576945281495934,0.06325484696770094,0.07093824853849892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595293018180473,0.0,0.040820744626665344,0.05981734270587029,0.0,0.0519706934201325,0.0,0.0,0.10970010865620386,0.13467215021122125,0.048744970398468715,0.1779399283329524,0.0,0.049677191125800164,0.0,0.0,0.05163248118517698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06175843710275656,0.05028931306543867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06690868733002159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04876910782865817,0.06566978902221493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11567857672772372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493659377852277,0.0,0.16510677391110562,0.0,0.05903749617935612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671676319926264,0.049658109149895456,0.0,0.06401079974715132,0.04510434397896576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271509405522844,0.0,0.09338384691830254,0.0,0.0643122955411352,0.05780550767123526,0.0,0.06214673445394463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856003088112665,0.05798464223353768,0.0,0.06736283229007717,0.0,0.06590406124090913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113456541727227,0.0,0.060793922102619226,0.06416838586233847,0.04758759822106708,0.0,0.0,0.06343018256801271,0.0,0.1237068379586829,0.028521582850830483,0.0,0.051550724774032164,0.05166457834582101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926539845598244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05918828916755073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409767919364365,0.0,0.043288127007737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03955988729263224,0.04440071992794814,0.06212057491984156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557304403781511,0.04047343172037544,0.05097527809529906,0.3049740537919667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059393580718507026,0.0,0.05586190044602088,0.06824324838464049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058395928957261,0.0,0.11219941945337256,0.0,0.0,0.06267841196533021,0.06613330729038616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059083808796839374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448779416124308,0.26248685069627475,0.05842229189687621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057739441805804426,0.0,0.20660878411950606,0.3111272567600065,0.13986734280574714,0.0,0.0,0.06103158804714761,0.0,0.12771677449988653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046923737467605885,0.0,0.0537485805141374,0.20028830119611885,0.0,0.11635549376271385,0.07481526063104722,0.05735818176959985,0.09269460493047033,0.13616769421850064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890882923966466,0.06350081766927641,0.0,0.06077577469978771,0.0,0.10084337687835272,0.0,0.0481697216953694,0.0,0.0,0.046829019223715664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750429084722018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093824853849892,0.0751897799031966
mentalhealth,compiledexploit,2020/01/08,"Well dried up and I cannot cry. I'm a fairly emotional person. I've been mentally ill for a very very long time (almost my entire life). 

I've made a lot of good changes in the last year: taking therapy seriously, starting on medication and ramping up to 5 separate medications I take. 

I've made some absolutely terrible decisions. Things that I wish I could take back and that the ones that it effected.. probably won't ever forgive me for. 

It's only in the immediate moments after that, that I am able to cry and it is because the pain of not releasing that out is worse than what people will think of me or the trauma from my childhood that forced me into the mindset of: ""You have to do this, you have to be strong, you have to endure"".

I can feel emotional, and tear up at something, what I mean is that I can't actually have a full on crying session. Which is what I need to let go of this grief I have.

It's easier for me to scream than it is to cry but screaming is really hard on my throat and vocal cords.

I use music as a way to tap into those deeper emotions but it still isn't the same as thing.

I don't know what to do.

Does anyone have any ideas?",3.830625000000001,4.3986488124999985,5.550833333333332,81.98250000000002,71.29166666666666,9.0,26.666666666666664,9.188382445141503,1.9677916666666664,905,28,193,18,16,311,136,240,0.115,0.81,0.075,-0.8533,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,3,0,2,4,11,0,0,12,0,26,6,1,4,1,32,41,11,1,3,4,0,2,0,0,2,5,2,0,1,24,9,0,0,8,0,0,1,6,7,1,1,3,4,22,4,36,33,4,26,0,1,0,0,5,13,0,4,11,139,46,1,0.11181455751049983,0.0,0.10911487868641588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196612776739692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760377333916958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818333842929781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597849282484019,0.0,0.0681611164331996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182849757648764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927482573878193,0.0,0.4912921640726139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978496727824446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773289821139528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011426687724747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056536799928850766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354678980070606,0.0937847458340582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001638809120678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622502531463706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06145035660446758,0.09114378806124857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433796072253423,0.0789779287189851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895236479786547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506073826901136,0.0,0.21160327575866245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217988326897032,0.0,0.22528280640752324,0.11268277490598733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290907759692187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576843795260788,0.08504000954366757,0.1189785727036424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751813541201652,0.09763215872963137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055500468176968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163126871660536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08608030913660837,0.0,0.0,0.0791429193123009,0.0,0.08929525006463729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25221189526355525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786969124857026,0.0,0.14856924716680828,0.07164625357877892,0.0,0.0,0.06519996767322475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657187705590298,0.0,0.1845174402278808,0.0,0.08875319121258597,0.0,0.0,0.1005347155904603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12858122292039453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394858668809373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07200490905249145
mentalhealth,3698642,2020/01/08,"Missed work for last 2 days. Not sure I can manage tomorrow either. I haven't been to work for the last 2 days. Coming back to work after Christmas just really set off my anxiety. I sent my boss a message saying I'm ill and can't work each morning. Which is true, but I just feel so bad about it. It feels like because it's 'just' anxiety/depression it isn't really a good reason to take a sick day. But then I spent 16hrs in bed and still felt tired and like I couldn't get up so I really don't think I would have managed if I had gone in. 

No one at work is aware of my mental health issues so I worry they are just going to think I'm skiving. I don't know if I'm going to be able to cope tomorrow either but after a few days you have to get a sick note which I don't want to do so I need to be back at work. Not sure what to do. Thinking of asking if I can work from home instead of going in. That way I am working but the stress isn't so bad. 

I really need advice for talking to my boss about my anxiety so that he can be understanding and maybe I can get some adjustments made that will help me.",1.221776859504132,2.4792261776859554,3.4157768595041347,92.12457438016527,78.54545454545455,6.823471074380167,19.53801652892562,7.554174236665415,0.3158059504132233,853,18,204,12,20,293,120,242,0.21,0.742,0.048,-0.9909,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,8,16,10,0,1,7,0,27,5,0,4,3,43,55,18,0,8,15,0,3,2,0,2,5,1,2,0,10,6,0,0,10,0,1,6,11,4,0,1,7,4,25,6,29,42,5,29,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,4,16,133,35,12,0.10100096628722886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869697531462444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15453092551585682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442226935031872,0.0,0.0,0.15532701731459214,0.16866317607331174,0.06156925159161863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700338921970538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605490706151862,0.0,0.08699198426502455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213824658860618,0.0721551104965436,0.09697676670234626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15830650867177465,0.0,0.17220353012764095,0.08471481856333912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735930414521372,0.0,0.0,0.06769881869333375,0.0,0.10131220430151612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541876792901256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05550748966799965,0.1646585358869762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868794074414472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955695564021748,0.0,0.0,0.10146904608808212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178521833672953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14978187344676666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844086868177897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588152211245986,0.10384581503045212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032002227355331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065950214524788,0.0,0.11569626563537652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19038443085675053,0.0,0.07594015692265106,0.08118075085306944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19415202286974967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608575290481235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514556789539292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05957298676101029,0.08016986583079402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5882392509824431,0.10257138396825473,0.0,0.07174818859115603,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sociallyawakward4996,2020/01/08,"Needing advice Hi I live in Richmond TX . I wanted to know if there are any good mental health inpaitent retreats or places you recommend for someone suffering with depression, aniexty, mood swings and anger management . I really need help ASAP . My appointment with a new doctor is next week but I'm struggling with money and can't afford to wait that long.  I'm not suicidal but I have been having suicidal thoughts very often, lashing out at others and not been sleeping or eating . I don't know what illness I truly have and my medication is helping me but I feel like I need something stronger or just somesort of DBT or Tramua based therapy. I don't know where do really turn to . If all else fails I can just go to a inpaitent treatment by me but I have been to one and they're very poorly ran . Thanks for reading this.",3.4219198312236268,5.840037183544303,4.425594936708862,82.0942995780591,75.89873417721519,7.504472573839662,27.62194092827005,8.447377352677275,2.2731986497890295,657,27,117,13,15,213,106,158,0.081,0.701,0.218,0.9746,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,1,5,9,1,1,2,0,15,6,1,0,1,35,31,15,2,6,14,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,9,1,1,5,1,2,2,5,5,0,1,5,1,16,3,15,26,1,11,0,3,0,0,4,5,0,7,5,76,20,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850166242367074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334365415635624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089007276776962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554599290475132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15550150823465628,0.12695001320312435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683973782932821,0.10856618277249944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636708611606306,0.12746379864704346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16153519488707538,0.0,0.0,0.2037222941844111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505534075300465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424403440407486,0.0,0.1341907917136091,0.13448716195873636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530920728056253,0.15314830150545586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3380477031368693,0.0,0.14677192961081598,0.16162000943706378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297765199556558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587745270695708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200942322296662,0.0,0.1947095667067409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15207804813084852,0.0,0.1287622461151261,0.11699262064086485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15887026138788835,0.0,0.3324573060877983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13991199162165752,0.1737889934382957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064585394021317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529786991072856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25077952324666186,0.08963483978462408,0.0,0.1218998024246538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nigario,2020/01/08,"I think my friend has severe social anxiety. I'm part of a group of friends who always hang out in discord, this specific friend, let's call him Bob.  
bob has been our friend for 5 years now, he lives in another city that's about 3 hours drive away.  


about 5 months ago, Bob disappeared, went silent, we started getting worried...

I kept messaging Bob almost daily in hopes of getting a reply, and one day Bob finally responded.

he asked me for help, that he's tired of everything, and he doesn't know what to do.

he only sends like 4 messages then disappears again, and he talks again 2 weeks later, it's been going like this for a while.

he says he's unsure of what he's dealing with, and that he feels like he's been a shitty friend for being gone for that long without saying anything, but he doesn't know how to talk to the group again, he only messaged me out of all of them.

I wish he can get help from someone but since we're in Saudi Arabia, that isn't an option (no one cares about mental health here)

what should I do?",6.230506993006997,5.362369673076923,6.250891608391608,83.92592657342658,66.21153846153845,9.294405594405594,29.00524475524476,8.296473431620573,1.760734615384616,804,21,170,9,11,255,126,208,0.067,0.785,0.147,0.9479,0,2,0,0,0,0,28.0,2,0,1,0,9,10,0,0,6,0,14,2,0,1,1,23,31,9,0,3,3,0,1,3,5,1,2,2,0,0,12,8,0,1,4,0,0,8,5,0,0,2,6,3,11,10,28,22,2,31,0,0,0,0,41,7,0,3,19,90,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101828379939144,0.0,0.12446667373072726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034260441562002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033748084470426,0.0950877684707307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228681231343592,0.0,0.1162020204886792,0.0,0.11678223297151615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692234047084622,0.0,0.1267302798686323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016204400257299,0.12814596699915942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11171119055393716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628488952046508,0.08879864555229493,0.0,0.13616258196033704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4801623326633866,0.0,0.19482200852342396,0.0,0.07064152088202087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321231542703899,0.0,0.0,0.16662890165614502,0.0,0.0,0.12345614021785307,0.12240867061253835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662205952168788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710331183242307,0.0,0.18217743850960447,0.0,0.10975757133073856,0.10999997900942107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526333149997956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921362243494897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16845532901389088,0.1890687359291122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346028175719236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19769380545715745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14042156479140522,0.0,0.10282074002825692,0.0,0.0,0.1267063425900314,0.10531744564745564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879788924790325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19981233958518274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964525563252985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286247439617614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997045034832296,0.0,0.0,0.115225659349612,0.0,0.0,0.1429367741856554,0.11981901117635176,0.0,0.0,0.1262308366812313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004395347730175
mentalhealth,dbowhx,2020/01/08,"I’m a mess, and I’m the only one to blame Right, this is my first post here, so sorry if I make any mistake and please tell me if that happened, thanks. 

I don’t even sure that I belong here, but I can’t find anywhere else so here I am. 

I haven’t been diagnosed in any way and that just make me feel invalid when I think there might be something wrong with me, I constantly questioning myself am I really have mental problems or I’m just finding excuses for not doing things, and if I DID have those, how can I sure that I’m not just mimicking or faking it?  

Even I did have self harm, but that doesn’t mean anything.  It’s like falling down a cliff, you know you are falling, so you’re no longer standing on the cliff, but yet hitting the hard ground beneath you. 

Also seeing others struggle in a situation worse than mine just let me think how weak and unthankful I am, can’t even face what’s happening when I have a lot more than them.

I’m currently studying in college, which I skip classes just because I can’t take the criticism and the fact I’m not able to do what’s required. 

I also started to avoid my friend because I tell her too much and I don’t want to be a burden, which is same as I face my mom, I always feels like I’m just wasting her time her care and her money. 

Thankfully, she is going to have another child soon, so my function and exist can be replaced :)

Sometime when everything is going well in my life, I’ll intentionally failed something just to stop feeling “wrong”, ‘cause apparently my brain can’t help but have bad feeling towards feeling good. 

Then after a while of relief, I get anxious about the consequences from the bad decision I made. 

I also can’t take any compliment and kind words seriously, I just feel like it all lies and nothing is going to get better, at least not for me.

I’m really a mess,I don’t even know why and what I’m writing, but thank you whoever made this far and finish reading my stupid rambling, you are very kind.",4.844799999999998,5.163812879999998,5.6065000000000005,83.3645,68.95,8.6,29.75,8.488131031819089,2.031825,1552,55,320,22,25,507,202,400,0.201,0.634,0.165,-0.9471,2,1,2,0,0,0,40.0,0,5,1,4,33,33,1,2,14,0,38,6,3,8,4,74,79,38,0,6,22,1,7,3,1,1,3,0,0,2,18,14,0,3,15,1,1,5,15,16,1,2,5,8,50,17,26,68,6,35,0,1,1,0,21,12,0,8,18,216,68,5,0.08879638448376961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21303130977126145,0.07388570522054673,0.0,0.0,0.18115375922019886,0.0931107514306218,0.0,0.10031463958068916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730718584878493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14828254403297975,0.10825890360612532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853318611424903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912613181139587,0.0,0.0,0.09053383195000428,0.0912183469546667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595734613344148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012646110181682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417798513299867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345966979715303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079804464750088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26938872016693005,0.12687230963512314,0.0,0.0,0.16231657347204834,0.0755301592802404,0.0,0.0,0.06860386638320495,0.0,0.09278489191431008,0.0,0.15139509484682914,0.07447819438905917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704469908886862,0.0,0.07954411911006565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951834477201817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18493554016810665,0.09760034137241318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080031927376638,0.06271951238195624,0.13014428454042334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549151069934233,0.0,0.16804257201059794,0.1185445523162838,0.0,0.0,0.09672529425494183,0.0,0.0,0.08948587042711796,0.09419893156099708,0.0,0.10399725231073964,0.0,0.0,0.06527555963851768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520252576390988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0601707281946953,0.06753365171823758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747176510937253,0.0,0.0,0.08504239074766988,0.0,0.0,0.08496614773729802,0.0,0.0,0.0994722726290838,0.0,0.08882041404649035,0.0,0.11377047532335174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583162717393728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075922192690974,0.0,0.09263399478844213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998108565824241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367195899488894,0.08782189477212023,0.09940028256250703,0.06285053797009486,0.0,0.0,0.07423775346732812,0.0,0.0928292608244988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16737908302781546,0.0,0.1335276605707914,0.0,0.15522390779577913,0.24525534198646606,0.0,0.0,0.058992372225992525,0.1137942754726816,0.0,0.0,0.051777885874094313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326631670879401,0.052374408203519005,0.0704824368717307,0.0,0.0,0.07983861366798012,0.0,0.08012492560251196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049110187631858,0.0,0.1941698138860728,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,miballenaestadormida,2020/01/08,"Why is it so hard to love/accept yourself? Why? I'm always lifting others up, telling them that they're amazing and worthy of love and good things... yet I struggle applying this kind of advice to myself. Why is it so hard to love yourself? I've been trying and trying but it's so tiring... :(",0.5477586206896561,3.0293354137931066,2.2926724137931025,91.53831896551728,91.41379310344827,3.589655172413793,19.31896551724137,5.148860815047168,-0.18814482758620701,226,7,43,1,8,74,39,58,0.136,0.679,0.18600000000000005,0.5034,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,4,6,7,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,5,6,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,27,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18887575911797125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16082851357656147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16211819677032185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462905957801225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012764711653853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5233414831606074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20206333539418303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689395146721702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284098934853667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221525495870877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624555077437688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5232286534974168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,j873,2020/01/08,"I’m so worried about my friend My best friend is extremely depressed and yesterday he told me he was planning to kill himself the night before and nearly did. He’s attempted suicide twice before (before I knew him) and I don’t know what to do. I literally can’t stop worrying, every time he isn’t online, I get terrified that somethings happened and I can’t think about anything else. I’m so scared right now, I don’t know how to handle it.",4.743333333333332,5.7012854545454585,5.684545454545457,80.43015151515155,69.45454545454545,8.593939393939394,30.57575757575757,8.841846274778883,2.4703348484848484,352,14,67,6,6,116,57,88,0.273,0.622,0.105,-0.9519,0,0,1,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,3,6,6,1,1,1,0,9,0,0,1,0,10,18,7,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,4,0,11,3,6,14,1,7,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,0,5,40,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776090602273132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4893929928823168,0.0,0.20118770364488167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651194486960869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014901473278506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16152385202960515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962291733438396,0.0,0.10016050581262274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952842398586931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120985908414026,0.0,0.2107174855228314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17990674645652127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16371919991781267,0.0,0.0,0.1919350455250008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14758764063035076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16027805355525945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096995056057485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283995761347513,0.0,0.0,0.11178757946599917,0.0,0.0,0.1831870169443822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3893814014228035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,steviewandersalone,2020/01/08,"Rational suicide (risk/reward) I'm having my first session with a therapist tomorrow. But I wanted to vent as I sit in a waiting room.

I have never had, and very likely will never have, a sexual relationship, and I say this as a man married for 7 years. We've not had sex for at least a decade now (precedes marriage) and I really don't think it will happen again. It's my fault (I never felt comfortable initiating) and now she has zero interest.

I'm for some reason very depressed about this, but I feel if I leave relationship, I will be even more depressed and lonely as I am a SUF-ferer (shy, ugly and fat) so likelihood of finding someone is very low.  

Since I am constantly unhappy now and unlikely to find happiness alternatively, my logic is to call it quits. If a meal is placed before me and I don't enjoy eating it, the rational thought would be to push it away,right?",5.191960063058328,5.735365127167633,6.845370467682606,73.99667367314768,68.2485549132948,10.22154492905938,30.756174461376766,10.230975488527342,3.1669699421965305,689,26,129,17,11,239,111,173,0.193,0.767,0.04,-0.976,0,2,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,2,8,10,0,0,8,0,19,4,1,1,3,29,28,16,1,4,5,0,2,1,0,4,1,1,1,1,7,9,3,1,8,0,0,1,6,5,0,2,4,3,17,5,15,18,3,19,0,4,0,1,7,5,0,3,13,93,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14134490821075704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801478696525184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536177730744525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16257400794908494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591503927037101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539393938474203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936530911300638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606783239035651,0.0,0.14444760276696753,0.0,0.2750019354351084,0.1279656139942171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303507853651236,0.1601479631076797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592960143666214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349820450425143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3480896882768916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15717953306676224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16001324221070645,0.0,0.0,0.09637679086012046,0.15467910045476715,0.0,0.32303612073166704,0.0,0.12847637055138694,0.0,0.11963726020289675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244469102162211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746874511007006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16455877746880898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17467438282221118,0.0,0.09639695234760556,0.0,0.11943388740471192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723904182943391,0.08873439917530304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686945128491313,0.0,0.0,0.09687950786002546
mentalhealth,CoolGawd,2020/01/08,"Probably major summer depression, not sure what to do. At the start of my teen years, I've started developing a major summer-phobia. And I'm thinking it gets progressively worse every year. I would go into a depression state every summer, with no idea what's causing it. Maybe it's my child phobia, because all the children are screaming and happy during the summer? Maybe it's the general sudden loudness of summer?

And the worst part is, is that I live in a place with just about no escape from the long summer because I'm still underage and am unable to get out - and neither can my mum, who is also my only family, because she is in a financial and political situation and ergo also cannot escape this horrible summer-ridden country called Israel.

I woke up today and all was fine - it was raining, about 12 degrees outside which is still hot but it was fine during the winter, but I was still relatively happened. Until I hopped onto my computer and saw that there's going to be a temperature hop to 19 degrees celsius, and I immediately felt like absolute shit afterwards. Wanting to simply gouge my eyes out and die, I was not ready for summer this early.

And truth is, I don't even /want/ to stay happy during summer, all I want to do is to move out of the middle of the hemisphere and somewhere northern, colder, more beautiful, quieter.

Any tips, please? Anything helps..",6.613055019305017,7.275644135135135,7.53470801158301,69.8741855694981,65.17760617760618,9.409362934362935,32.01761583011583,9.354420925462401,3.0821291505791515,1097,41,176,19,16,369,149,259,0.12300000000000001,0.767,0.11,-0.363,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,0,1,10,12,1,0,14,0,21,2,2,1,5,38,37,18,1,4,5,1,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,2,14,19,0,0,3,0,0,3,7,5,0,0,8,6,16,7,28,27,9,37,0,2,2,0,7,11,1,0,22,127,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20717509001241385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808692584397475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659467527930114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368864617951447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226774167838265,0.0,0.0,0.1330661389263032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231332775627005,0.0,0.1344348704792014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555536754970376,0.0,0.21827438737549865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221122452099212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12437205556666338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353513600051044,0.0,0.14723325146903374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11454566128557635,0.2757807119672208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868232827989414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462270631775377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328331242298159,0.0,0.1143800692467958,0.11463268605252044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602667477479006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13767314816382334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851573265415148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14027168611718996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353344828578352,0.1421884069427571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13965855219301987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296382942898471,0.0,0.145600591895737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833683397327488,0.13806501200037993,0.3103358182763211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12208338047720495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299955751550264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278219938996066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292058728598511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320052592035317,0.09201657264626877,0.0,0.0,0.16683009345993094
mentalhealth,lemongrass-tea,2020/01/08,"My wife (f40)has suggested seeing a therapist for my emotional problems, but I (m41) am afraid of it and what it means.  I am a 41m been married for almost 18 years, 2 kids 1 grown and 1 still at home, wife 40. We were teen parents and have been together since we were Jr's in High school. We dated about 5 months before we became parents. It has been a really hard life, went from care free kid flunking Biology to parent expected to know everything in .25 seconds flat

She has been suggested that I should go to therapy because of lack of self esteem, low confidence, social anxiety,.... any number of things. My parents tried to get me to go in my youth and I refused at all. Now its come down to my wife is urging me to go, almost on an ultimatum.

I don't know I am scared to go and lay on a couch and talk about my mom and dad, or what ever, take my skin off to some stranger, who is going to ask me all sorts of questions that I don't have the answers to or don't feel comfortable talking about. I don't have some kind of checkered past, I was not abused, not molested, didn't have mommy or daddy issues, was not dropped on my head, or have some major learning disability. Does it really help to go and talk to some stranger who does not know me from anyone and has no reason to care other than I am paying them to care. There are things I know they will ask that I don't want to answer, not because I am hiding anything but because well I am a private person.

Then there is the cost, I don't have insurance, and then there is the stigma of it, I don't want anyone to know I am going to talk to someone about my feelings. I don;t like to talk to people about things like that , not even my family. I just don't trust it I guess.

What if the person is really bad also? We don't get along, or they think I am crazy!, and put some not in my medical file that haunts me for the rest of my life.

TL:DR My wife wants me to go to therapy but I am scared and unsure about it.",3.6220568140956497,4.0099638737864085,4.9679072276159655,86.62355088097807,71.66990291262137,8.239626033800793,25.453434016540808,8.285830014693849,1.3411782452355268,1524,42,339,22,27,510,193,412,0.095,0.7879999999999999,0.11699999999999999,0.922,4,0,0,0,1,0,52.0,5,0,3,0,16,18,1,3,11,0,44,5,2,1,3,70,76,24,0,8,17,10,4,2,0,2,3,0,2,5,22,19,0,1,14,0,3,12,18,8,1,1,10,5,50,11,55,64,10,36,0,2,1,0,39,13,0,16,12,233,72,4,0.0,0.09471566649200908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16009645219386762,0.0,0.0,0.06392788003218057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05436184849655221,0.0,0.061153776842024325,0.0,0.0,0.11179162263435713,0.0,0.06578369641751905,0.0,0.14946596273829707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06674644700808433,0.1461917966101073,0.0,0.06802293606670977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445120559307013,0.0,0.0,0.06886111412431407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399118266672949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992158692830064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0527995259709925,0.07231018326154776,0.0,0.0,0.07184479484335755,0.0,0.07536018892785136,0.0,0.08083999391143674,0.057109054522092424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835305586601201,0.0,0.3634533335487884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806277224530817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161041598805988,0.0,0.08204136269548706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053582005504988414,0.08446085488687421,0.080186201079767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343644856032999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324506645230323,0.2196642921076341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129277795137922,0.07810915886408855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707794662455931,0.0,0.08053100246766018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362460208129826,0.06380723644748611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3550550330907012,0.0,0.0763116451816395,0.05542023604642959,0.13960081092662333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649165334211272,0.0,0.08036164244735207,0.08955094231906588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536345707806116,0.08219149373694468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16006749815293375,0.08090340973964183,0.06370172143293314,0.0,0.08339471196176325,0.0,0.0,0.06612708123816488,0.0,0.0,0.0814886238665384,0.06773278700592307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06384007832623924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06010482878159655,0.32126317143083205,0.0,0.0,0.1828364016888184,0.09281634299350476,0.15932547984020193,0.05122223675884192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054273919987773415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14145180814911498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187553775990696,0.07410505443200394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051478651221171866
mentalhealth,DesperateSet1,2020/01/08,Never thought I have such hatred for a child. Child me makes adult me very angry. I was a terrible bully from the age of 11-14 and whoo boy does looking at photos of that little shit make me wanna throw hands at a 11 year old. I'm supposed to learn to forgive and understand that I was a kid but I was such a shitty one. Well that least I grew out of my shitty phase and I didn't go back to being a bully. Just need to vent.,0.9941129032258048,2.391592645161289,3.027620967741939,94.06143145161293,79.53763440860214,5.5102150537634405,18.076612903225808,5.985473137389443,-0.3858161290322584,328,6,77,2,8,111,63,93,0.26,0.696,0.043,-0.9692,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,7,0,6,2,2,2,1,15,14,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,4,0,0,4,0,0,3,2,2,1,1,5,2,10,2,13,8,1,12,0,0,1,0,6,4,1,0,5,51,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21706737055709724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470381892367988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604347100790141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829336741170501,0.0,0.0,0.2370566373038513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3768681059624405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20931810826158925,0.21772324734274215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29622103429246743,0.0,0.19129034549486165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897716814998304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22411063600226386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938789702316845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232922875571859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538170377955493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18178867483836125
mentalhealth,runawayaccount29,2020/01/08,"A string of vivid, near nightmarish dreams? Recently been experiencing a string of strange dreams that can borderline nightmarish at times. Most of the time they just place me in anxious and/or uncomfortable situations and may involve nightmarish images. 

In the real world, I recently got my wisdom teeth taken out, but I’m only taking antibiotics since I have no pain. I am about to go on deployment soon (I’m in the military), so there’s a lot of stressful thoughts regarding that. Also, just overall have occasional depression. Those are currently factors of my life that I believe are causing these strange dreams. 

I ask for any advice for how to either ease my dreams so I don’t wake up every morning asking myself “what the fuck was that.”",5.863574846206426,8.277771338345868,5.982597402597403,73.70558441558444,68.69924812030075,9.648393711551606,32.39166097060834,10.018931242160765,3.7225398496240594,600,27,97,16,11,190,95,133,0.19,0.7020000000000001,0.109,-0.9209,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,9,5,1,1,7,0,10,5,2,2,0,13,20,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,1,4,0,1,2,4,0,0,5,2,12,1,18,14,3,17,0,1,1,1,4,10,1,3,6,68,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18648702143098844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15261499177445206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297780101102836,0.0,0.0,0.2155953213295594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35682000814641585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21501176913491912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19604565101411586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437054917074054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607912603387273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642886636521216,0.0,0.0,0.10845899215260883,0.0,0.1526324943246888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479621201992695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622456759542769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451427169913773,0.20306763132587968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993875903412004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21721814529430528,0.0,0.0,0.376863726012342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786514356726464,0.21451259543984552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186070231661171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14348822369036288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150595341565803,0.22256113343878348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mansnicks,2020/01/08,"What is this? It's annoying that I'm not be able to do things because I'm incapable of **not** fantasizing for hours and hours and hours.


It's annoying to have to often vividly remember a completely random negative experience of the past at completely random times.
I thought people were supposed to remember only the good from the past?


I bet it's not very normal to want to avoid all humans as much as possible for years on end?",2.7020749665327983,5.360439662650607,4.640401606425705,78.21902275769749,80.08433734939759,8.990093708165999,27.29451137884873,9.444778638647367,3.132738688085676,344,15,62,11,9,117,55,83,0.16899999999999998,0.78,0.051,-0.8822,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,2,1,4,0,5,0,0,0,1,16,9,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,2,0,1,3,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,2,1,2,1,15,6,2,10,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,4,8,42,9,0,0.17566676211507065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708482770540977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36836651575528095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558861057656376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17183580115739916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14734094560904387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5189891259263623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291352826312822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17211612928760306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336024884359801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353876030945742,0.12178521434248685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19803787986872087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3979923945753574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670519108040145,0.0,0.0,0.13945978695162578,0.10243270166397736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449434760565463,0.1036128076643352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312363534107385
mentalhealth,Luce_pp,2020/01/08,How do I become more talkative It's this weird thing where my mind just goes blank when I'm around people. I freez up and I just cannot have conversations. It's like I have nothing to say. The main issue is that ots keeping me from making friends. I always end up being someone people just know.,1.303214285714283,3.776763083333337,2.5028571428571422,92.38500000000002,84.83333333333334,4.761904761904762,18.57142857142857,6.1826913282559595,-0.1158571428571431,235,6,48,2,7,75,48,60,0.034,0.865,0.10099999999999999,0.5754,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,2,0,10,10,3,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,7,2,5,9,2,6,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343553213000119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507281691773866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110602421838009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494582579841022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21760205307193947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29396937333860795,0.0,0.2503434170132453,0.0,0.0,0.15478744699700034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759993911221596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880035289879256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843861606013459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27025072361928104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39052122524286415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22397934521677598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23864108904649026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18711571211243933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Veronikaxoxo,2020/01/08,"Just discovered that I have ADHD Today I discovered that I have ADHD it’s been 16 years with it and I didn’t know at all about it...
I’m 16 years old I got depression anxiety,probably IED and now ADHD perfect is that even possible? To have a bunch of mental illness?
And I thought I was perfect just a cry baby a loser and now I got 4 mental disorders.... am I really that broken? god help me if it really exists...",-0.596726296958856,1.605215534883726,3.0434883720930266,85.02503577817535,97.13953488372091,6.832200357781752,19.40608228980322,7.882392219407189,1.4815574239713776,320,11,64,9,13,117,53,86,0.188,0.672,0.14,-0.6547,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,6,4,0,0,3,0,8,1,0,0,3,13,13,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,6,0,10,2,5,7,2,7,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,6,46,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6447431662594785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19643222712981154,0.0,0.0,0.15402277810143433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20495036332132585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181130446828291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860473597374191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11986345888565797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982782245552168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3604295782039594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18764805661302533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20159971597429505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291213363469337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196805913051025,0.0,0.0,0.16950636550509066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303164704637121
mentalhealth,NonPC_Italian,2020/01/08,"A workplace’s toll on mental health I think this is something we can all relate to. I’ve been in a rut at my job for months. Manager duties for slightly above minimum wage, long commutes, and boss that talks behind your back. There is so much drama between employees and the owner, and it’s absolutely draining. I’ve been reading as much as I can on the subject to get better, but I could still use some advice. 
Some of my readings:
https://vocal.media/journal/tips-to-surviving-a-toxic-work-environment
https://www.monster.com/career-advice/article/handle-toxic-workplace

These have offered some good tips, but I’d like to hear from those who are maybe experiencing it.",9.989150943396226,12.918616924528301,8.502028301886796,57.707004716981174,59.0,7.941509433962264,29.287735849056602,8.472884824447931,2.199550943396228,558,17,81,7,8,170,81,106,0.0,0.9109999999999999,0.08900000000000001,0.8422,3,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,1,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,4,0,9,1,0,2,1,15,13,8,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,4,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,7,3,15,10,6,8,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,3,5,57,14,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21458395666351868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885363429759168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19421236125461505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753273206124677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11472839597528348,0.0,0.0,0.18418437745842267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334173280861269,0.24749752259046706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21791239067139212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728215698782197,0.0,0.0,0.19433309272471208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206109084806704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22129832055065213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17527721606705224,0.0,0.3228525721895496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4393052973678252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690535919115017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536743205819613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650071511751522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070647092209185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896580397733872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598664821518264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PythonLoverOld,2020/01/08,"I am having a panic attack very strong, plz help me plz help I don't know what to do plz talk to me",-0.5150000000000006,0.3531175000000033,2.3649999999999984,99.48,82.33333333333333,4.800000000000002,12.0,3.1291,-1.7298500000000003,76,0,21,0,2,27,17,24,0.196,0.3670000000000001,0.4370000000000001,0.7055,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4607400051339597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5429188998684934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22257452793618399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4751740885153465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3255194462350841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341630905338621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aceshades,2020/01/08,"(Venting) I say really mean things to myself out loud. It scares me sometimes. I’m in my own head a lot.

If I think of something I did that makes me cringe or that disappoints me, I often end up berating myself verbally like you would with someone you are mad at.  Thankfully this doesn’t happen out in public. For example, recently I got a new job offer, and I tried to negotiate for a higher salary, etc., but I did it all wrong. I kind of continued to lowball myself, and when I got the updated offer, I looked at myself in the mirror and kept saying “you fucking idiot” over and over. I should be happy! Logically, it’s a average/above average offer! Why can’t I get past my own head?

Sometimes I wake up dreading heading to to a cafe to study for upcoming interviews and I say “I hate my fucking life” in a chant. Over and over and over. I’ll be in the shower, chanting “I want to die, just fucking kill me” over and over and over.

I don’t think I actually have any real desire to off myself, but it scares me when I start saying these things. I have a good life. Privileged, better than most. I should be grateful, but I’m not.

I’ve thought about seeing a psychiatrist for well over 3-4 years now but decided against it since I’m scared they’d ask “so what brings you here?” And I’d not have a good answer for them, or I’d have to explain this weird mean chanting I give myself when I’m in my head and not busy.",2.4122183908046004,3.972375227586213,4.218362068965519,86.34076149425293,76.0344827586207,7.454022988505748,24.152298850574713,8.212053250817874,1.3624367816091951,1096,35,232,19,24,371,150,290,0.161,0.721,0.11800000000000001,-0.9422,3,0,1,0,0,2,38.0,0,4,2,1,10,23,7,4,12,0,17,10,5,1,1,46,45,22,2,6,11,0,0,1,0,3,2,5,1,0,13,14,0,1,9,0,0,1,6,14,1,0,6,7,43,9,42,32,6,35,0,1,2,3,18,22,3,6,13,162,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.10148459164121988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072049582492798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722173993469868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197555520711118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793089445860607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210913204251224,0.0,0.11598245552313967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.288426449825549,0.054333348555573716,0.09976194519677306,0.0,0.1744529572451404,0.16634937873472858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196286376321892,0.110705127363731,0.0,0.10267401099379836,0.4269174804345055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319947190299628,0.0,0.11505559572443398,0.1082952941686547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691017286010874,0.05080694086116989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733001530456239,0.0,0.0,0.08841324226798154,0.0,0.0,0.0694177936459041,0.0,0.0,0.22656314054868898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043948726212057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927545758131832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836962921784892,0.06662217052303965,0.0,0.10268299513674983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33080553436210114,0.3123528673482057,0.0,0.08287093704924686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602613969087003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811503679767108,0.08006080496303779,0.2057083872607756,0.0,0.07360853940721816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574507017495676,0.0,0.0,0.13817995823005993,0.1332722150195794,0.0,0.08256079852725956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060610774008612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133923136843819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350443019586313,0.0,0.093839749574128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387540862966498,0.11370273715020385,0.0,0.06696968258889699
mentalhealth,Turtle_the_Oblivious,2020/01/08,"Anxiety and exhaustion from the sheer amount of unimportant decisions I want to make I have a fairly decent life, a good family, a loving girlfriend and a lot of prospects. And yet, whenever I think of all the books I want to read, movies I want to watch, games I want to play etc. I get a healthy dose of petrifying anxiety which drains my energy quicker than an iPhone in the freezing cold. This reactions, of course, leaves me in a state of non-action which only makes the new releases and new recommendations from all around me pile onto the already huge mental list I've jotted down over the years. What do?",9.903275862068966,7.558430362068968,9.225241379310344,70.24389655172415,60.03448275862069,13.417931034482756,36.99310344827586,11.979248473330829,4.201281379310345,486,16,92,12,5,155,78,116,0.109,0.695,0.196,0.8176,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,13,0,2,4,0,2,2,16,11,4,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,10,3,19,11,5,12,0,0,1,1,3,7,0,1,4,57,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201899723540499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052848762477857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17762695188599448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225323879899894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18810224927137376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10424792048959508,0.0,0.0,0.16735907595925725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21127696788958952,0.0,0.0,0.1409362797119763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16963608713997327,0.18008660507738955,0.0,0.266380071353764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20108264853816454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854210336919544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15175407567854332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995873093202016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785289002225592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47075967041121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284929114685417
mentalhealth,BernhardttheNorse,2020/01/08,"Neep suicide prevention advice I posted here some hours ago but due to it calling almost no one's attention, I've decided to write another, more detailed one.

I have a depressive reaction since 2 years and a half ago, caused by the loss of a very close friend. I have meds, i have a psychologist. 

Lately I've been really struggling to see the worth of my own life, or rather, not to hurt or kill myself. I think about suicide several hours a day, i cry relatively often, around a month ago I attempted to end my life... Again. I feel really unmotivated to do anything, sad, angry even, these past months. 

I feel absolutely worthless and see few reasons why i shouldn't do it.

If you could give me some help or advice, or you need more information, please help or ask away. 
I may have suicidal tendencies but this is not how i want my story to end.

Thank you.",3.993229842446709,5.649469379518077,5.241807228915665,80.22483317886935,72.07228915662652,9.204077849860983,26.62465245597776,9.661875296680813,2.438449119555144,671,23,132,17,13,223,109,166,0.27899999999999997,0.601,0.12,-0.9883,0,0,0,0,0,4,26.0,0,3,0,2,8,9,1,1,8,0,11,2,0,3,0,35,21,11,4,6,11,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,7,0,1,0,4,7,0,3,1,4,20,2,13,17,6,19,0,5,2,0,11,3,0,11,15,84,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327184197734153,0.3166597640576558,0.0,0.11923692247725608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486105423675525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798899853826393,0.10600244904880277,0.1113195274960467,0.0,0.11187536102772797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158940877696235,0.0,0.0,0.1223233492533928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507210518077176,0.0,0.13079885597836005,0.07679385284314481,0.0,0.10255956196517084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21093111610490567,0.0,0.0,0.07864825108573208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041631097992632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919974433640682,0.0,0.0,0.1142280791194493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15962760820802088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345307821103597,0.0,0.1274727958420373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13173940890610392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13432236143188184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682131078721116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226604755186835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900898714873152,0.0,0.0,0.0882929815937031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137729405354306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136710476209236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307091518742816,0.0,0.0,0.11404142271883742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15256564114913382,0.1224294559024256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18977552884104085,0.0,0.0,0.13452143239073566,0.0,0.09850049206205083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448357673498195,0.0,0.3907478424087324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962873097221794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762987785154634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824976604469146,0.07023382072252139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744712643443448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668072416070308
mentalhealth,sassyandworried,2020/01/08,"how do you know if antidepressants are working? I've tried two different types (one SSRI and currently taking a SNRI) but they don't seemed to have helped that much. As a very 'kind' doctor once said to me ""they're not mAgIc PiLlS"" 😒 I mean I'm less suicidal right now but idk if that's the tablets or I'm playing a game that's very distracting at the moment. I still have 0 motivation and have many zombie days where I can't even find the will to get out of bed. Can anyone give any help or advice that isn't ""it's different for everyone"" cause that isn't very helpful to me",1.044134615384614,3.2883423749999987,2.661666666666669,92.42076923076924,83.58333333333334,6.35897435897436,19.23076923076923,7.61054688173877,0.5031346153846155,455,12,101,8,13,149,85,120,0.12,0.805,0.076,-0.7289,3,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,1,2,5,3,0,1,6,0,11,2,0,3,0,17,20,10,1,2,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,6,3,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,1,0,2,1,1,7,2,9,18,2,9,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,5,5,57,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16545363649831465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514068671104548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838968462853412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17393417317230542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919481342289697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3537983677517841,0.0,0.17330210146341068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183162174301944,0.0,0.0,0.1617886947461622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15475175741264702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846062221461694,0.16242333631288328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3404668391431173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17631655989830272,0.09305164610350873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17165984972433454,0.0,0.18443476167620407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12446674241671547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803160150913777,0.1147329041483406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14459493964919445,0.16105828983832932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541389281630941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521597704015367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18520422389524596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273045610471056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149544504228716,0.0,0.16539713031071773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4191102988675371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232640652054368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,XxAlphaFreakxX,2020/01/08,"I just hate life at this point Lol I ha e no friends as such who will want to listen to me when I'm sad. It's all just fake people everywhere. I had this one girl who was my best friend. She was the one I trusted completely. .

So we had this trip and she asked me out and we were dating but I didn't know she was just playing around. And then I truly just fell in love but she just stopped talking to me. She was with her other friends or something f**king bs. 

It's like idek what I did she just says I lost feelings. And that fucked me up so bad. I always had anxiety only she knew but she just played with my feelings enough to make me fall so deeply in love and just leave. And I feel messed up somewhere I can't even get her out of my head. Just cause of all that I didn't perform well in my entrance exams which made it all worse cause my parents again. Idek if i should live. I literally have no one in my life who cares. Everyone just uses me. Thinking back i remember a girl who talked to me to get to talk to my friend and as soon as they started talking I was a stranger. This world is messed up. This is like done large ass rant. I don't have anyone to rant to also. Everyone just use me at this point. Just want to sit in my room locked up.",-0.33958050655812144,1.8155966679104485,1.1384667571234743,101.36510402532792,89.78358208955223,4.293260967887834,17.449570330167347,5.760197766056111,-0.6813870646766169,969,25,236,7,33,308,137,268,0.17600000000000002,0.6509999999999999,0.174,-0.1675,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,2,0,1,3,24,23,2,0,3,2,21,7,2,6,3,51,45,21,0,4,17,1,3,2,4,2,2,2,1,2,18,14,0,1,7,2,0,3,6,8,1,3,16,5,46,15,32,27,5,30,0,2,0,4,33,18,2,2,10,166,64,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144799757575832,0.09515079918271127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747967918821585,0.0,0.0,0.07995822816672928,0.0,0.0,0.1017983527854512,0.1069045539385138,0.0,0.0,0.08793034532462354,0.09547992082817668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000634602945848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659043433912622,0.23494392012512624,0.0,0.0,0.11989687245813035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170227508637743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118157146149046,0.0,0.07552903241224243,0.0,0.0,0.21853825204283134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17346083344659655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35339516318621345,0.10571744201581497,0.11948937336897712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11289984476458233,0.1173590979884227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628453802692271,0.0,0.0,0.12108324262901858,0.0,0.0,0.16154171391284264,0.1117341317567863,0.0,0.10097573308228616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482973248510182,0.0,0.2064159696594761,0.10820350821447024,0.07633146938221555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324655164909553,0.08697055693704375,0.0,0.0,0.12697539707634084,0.0,0.0,0.07927792395228246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162009637857462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12953957900833832,0.0,0.0,0.09093804049157528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803447303330175,0.0,0.0,0.08093959310622949,0.0,0.0,0.09560417066955212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3676502171809629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327274079149093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19752843342979184,0.0,0.0,0.13489664292736672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281701816978113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653540609451253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MadnessFromWithin,2020/01/08,"Am I in the wrong ? I always take the blame and I always have to prove others that they are wrong about me. Whether it's my father, my mom, my friends, anyone. I always feel like I have to prove to them that I can do things better, that I can actually achieve at doing things. For instance, me and my dad are supposed to buy a house together, but he keeps on telling me that I lack things and that I am not proving him that I am worthy. My friends cannot take simple questions and tell me that they focus too much on being ""optimal"" with their time.   


I'm always here for them whenever they need me. Of course on a post like that it just seems like they're terrible people, but we sometimes have a good  time. I just feel that they can do whatever they want with me and then just apologize afterwards, but whenever I want to do whatever I want with them as well I get treated badly. I feel as if I'm too kind with them. I legitimately feel like some kind of guardian angel, who can take the hits so that they can be happy, but I cannot access those emotions anymore, unless they come from my own achievement, which is guiding me in a path of anti-social behaviors.   


Those moments completely shatter my confidence, I don't feel like I can achieve anything other than making others happy. I'm scared that I'm the one who's just being delusional about this whole thing. I don't know what to do, and have to focus my incomes on buying this condo with my dad, so that my money can grow and I can escape this loop. I have one friend who's really supportive, I sincerely believe in him but at the same time maybe he just has pity. I'm a bit lost.",6.021030547163477,5.381304135951666,6.411878147029202,81.84520224907688,66.55287009063444,9.530782141658275,30.17136623027861,8.841846274778883,2.1423412554548507,1283,39,267,18,18,416,153,331,0.07400000000000001,0.711,0.215,0.9942,1,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,1,0,12,5,13,25,0,1,10,0,32,0,0,1,3,48,58,20,0,6,14,4,5,5,3,0,0,0,1,0,31,14,0,1,11,0,3,2,5,7,1,2,1,5,55,18,33,53,7,18,1,2,0,0,31,9,0,4,11,196,86,3,0.0,0.0,0.0984960298495351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33593730357340423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000983958044934,0.07057468723215579,0.0,0.08305924344307092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427482329083738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11371690616795425,0.0,0.08926701959972817,0.11019267400813773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694482604795224,0.10582631041050433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353601859131687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25517373984316866,0.21631962571310515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339417125953919,0.0,0.05273331679822538,0.0,0.0,0.08465779585980937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148900705609335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646310873121192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897138712407569,0.0,0.2102123357742819,0.05547012681719389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465537813522013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018027199201387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673735486782873,0.0,0.10140074588475699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821148764848435,0.0,0.0,0.07419735464645234,0.07484052660914045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367896003931826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997422048522904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666589549335236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130680384912948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466025226447128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010515220369038,0.0,0.0,0.0918855952656894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998252992117648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145375509045514,0.0,0.0,0.22766712169180664,0.0,0.17643974866108378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26822155108140505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17656449897873078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17859866210544878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075087162192183,0.0,0.0,0.11268806893479995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22070874033593732,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GolfAndGanja,2020/01/08,"Brother in law in trouble This past weekend my brother in law had a meltdown. College educated, has a job, owns a house, has a family. Has always been atheist. So about a week ago he stopped sleeping. Then he said God has been speaking to him and now believes he is Jesus. He is trying to rewrite the bible. He is OBSESSED with something he calls a click funnel, his idea to make money online. Has a notebook he's been writing nonsense in totally full of ""click funnel"" and ideas of killing non believers. I couldnt believe it when my sister told me about it so I went to the hospital when nobody else was there just to be someone he can calmly talk to. He totally thinks he is himself and Jesus at the same time. He mentioned wiping out non believers. He tried laying his hands on me to get god to talk to me through him. He was drug tested and all he has in his system is thc from vape cartridges (I've been telling him for months to stop because it's impossible to know what's in them). The social worker is telling my sister that it's mania brought on by sleep deprivation, but this started before he stopped sleeping. Any thoughts or advise? Thanks in advance",3.964542339696522,5.683301198237885,4.611152716593246,84.46467816935879,72.25991189427313,6.630347528144887,30.672785119921684,7.1686216300943375,1.8656482623592765,920,41,172,9,18,294,135,227,0.069,0.883,0.048,-0.5742,1,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,2,9,6,1,1,11,0,22,5,4,1,3,26,33,11,1,1,3,4,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,8,6,0,3,5,1,1,3,1,4,0,0,12,5,16,2,31,19,6,30,2,1,2,0,39,12,0,1,14,108,24,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616692741035236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965640314036636,0.0,0.0,0.08144621031160182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300933860685327,0.0,0.10191357560722507,0.5397491841198929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229631358982247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13889262304418454,0.0,0.10005062777012656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129064218066298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257373172758479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819595967748113,0.0,0.2704065336983321,0.0,0.0,0.11885106000197132,0.0,0.13250532448325672,0.0,0.06582125011470935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994593582386607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559751448543287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433191612463912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113926603369312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35956288152254684,0.12208818833410412,0.10147886740505556,0.09220310297141997,0.0,0.0,0.08477226455158589,0.0,0.0,0.3003937283548244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19252964017503735,0.20936467055629407,0.11026609797919276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674236956743463,0.0,0.0950822541882513,0.06983756672582575,0.0,0.0,0.11444326445094402,0.0,0.162628947470011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607050405049387,0.0,0.0,0.11102594954629784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hannahdactyl,2020/01/08,"Night sickness advice please. Desperate. Sorry in advance the long post. 

For 17 years I have had, alongside anxiety and depression, a condition where I feel/will be sick at night. The feeling is like having a sickness virus, the kind that keeps you feeling like you need to be sick and/or being sick even if there's nothing left in you including bile. It's completely mental and my mind does all of this to itself but I don't know how to stop it. The best analogy I have is that it's like years ago there was a fire and while the fire was put out years ago the fire alarm is still ringing. It used to be that I could take a couple of valium (or diazepam) and that would get me through the attack and the night but now even 15ml of valium will make me sleepy but every time I drop off the sickness and panic will jolt me awake, it used to stop as soon as the sun rose now it bleeds into the day (especially this time of year) and keeps me feeling sick all day. 

Distractions that used to help can't punch through the panic anymore and an attack now means that I can't sleep or eat properly if at all for as long as it keeps up. It has been getting steadily worse and I am now in a place where one attack of the sickness will keep it coming back for weeks. I am awake all night feeling like I want to be sick (by the way being sick provides no relief), trying not to be and wanting to die. I had an attack before Christmas, spent weeks sleeping on the sofa so I can distract myself with films all night and was just getting back to a point where I thought I could sleep in my own bed again. Then I had another attack two days ago and I'm back to feeling sick all the time and now, because of how much of a state I get in, needing someone to be with me all night. I honestly don't know how much longer I can do this and I am desperate. I know it must sound melodramatic but I don't want to be alive anymore. Sleeping tablets don't keep me asleep, anti-sickness tablets do nothing the only thing that helps is smoking weed which isn't legal where I live so all I can get is whatever my dealer has in... and she only ever seems to have the stuff that peps you up, not great for anxiety and certainly not good for trying to sleep. I currently only have the awful stuff that was all my dealer had (we think it was harvested too early as all it really does is make you cough like hell which isn't too handy when you're trying not to retch) and I'm nearly out of even that.

 I'm looking for any advice. Have any of you had or know someone who has had something similar? How do/did they deal with it and if they got over it then please tell me how. Please help if you can. Thank you.",3.739096650717702,4.5411802800000025,4.407827751196173,89.23984688995216,71.65454545454546,7.4622009569377985,25.200956937799038,7.573540080772713,1.0343818181818176,2094,59,456,23,38,669,224,550,0.19699999999999998,0.701,0.102,-0.9966,1,0,1,0,0,3,47.0,1,8,2,2,32,25,6,5,28,1,60,20,6,10,13,94,102,45,1,13,16,0,8,5,0,5,13,2,2,0,34,26,1,7,13,1,1,3,13,12,0,2,15,11,48,13,59,71,14,74,1,1,1,0,18,24,1,8,48,314,82,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479489279981432,0.1562013170440308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988680737172016,0.061591219766513314,0.08986780482532346,0.0,0.1165033112036491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341110049907217,0.0,0.13549616068301207,0.0,0.03580573575681493,0.0,0.0499811479990855,0.0,0.06164121189546145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05059701529281157,0.061584980839101036,0.0,0.0,0.0937939689785235,0.06499174673641916,0.0,0.11364217039712693,0.06055561580971185,0.050590382715947915,0.0,0.06096008289037544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280287973195552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060102960049965876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638637235165936,0.0531312845404385,0.049488740160295336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781961761825547,0.12588589692852736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534391727351859,0.0,0.0,0.049266091916867774,0.04697761455280392,0.06475812194946999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811119757928043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26104222191682763,0.0,0.06116589825622803,0.1291220182931108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06381828905165964,0.0,0.0,0.1434804808131727,0.0,0.05186614512616575,0.10396139065405884,0.049324570119500095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784152577618867,0.0,0.0,0.06398217997280108,0.0,0.0,0.05919342102593907,0.0,0.059307966737422425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635740292728168,0.08710598298917263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33072607357725897,0.0,0.11272011896278472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03980194002098676,0.13401717591267953,0.0,0.13783121976851384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061368016077466274,0.19342787423494973,0.055525769518258467,0.0,0.05625413282065758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904724754414696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03762864245490732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0534722660355093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938987844893485,0.0,0.09953591089962853,0.04521887205047441,0.0,0.06575164042922177,0.0,0.0,0.04690771359777489,0.09821408845970704,0.0,0.0,0.13448039729424968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04416316784454225,0.0,0.05133902192374877,0.05407744875540391,0.0,0.0,0.03902247706621045,0.03763651415718298,0.0,0.04663088494691912,0.10275064153981203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963638961742795,0.0,0.057377843863858385,0.0,0.0,0.15219060187161454,0.0,0.0,0.10393441045981494,0.04662296450567025,0.09423109831413007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059858364978733376,0.04172531930004444,0.0,0.0,0.15129967827059992
mentalhealth,calineaf,2020/01/08,"Dissociation? 18y/o living in a country where mental health isn’t very publicized, in the sense that people are just expected to manage themselves regardless of what they might be going through; and any deviation from that will result in you not being taken seriously. 
I’ve been dealing with severe anxiety, having out of body experiences, spacing out, always finding negatives, often find myself not wanting to talk to any other human for days on end, very diverse emotions at certain times, dare I say voices in my head reflecting different parts of my personality that I can actually visualize. Idk what to do beside distract myself or focus on small things.",8.940751879699251,10.13120370175439,9.393007518796992,56.72605263157897,60.2280701754386,11.4265664160401,38.2155388471178,11.20814326018867,5.032006516290728,538,25,71,14,7,180,94,114,0.07,0.899,0.032,-0.5076,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,10,3,2,1,1,18,13,2,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,2,7,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,2,8,1,20,7,1,16,0,0,0,0,8,12,0,3,3,56,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.1828533689215478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559130550709898,0.0,0.0,0.25484619298872896,0.0,0.1433432420538517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20813411397279985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12084295868747115,0.1931779308864482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19576956174806065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21077441928447194,0.16596081070076615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18329110827469056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425192029113121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649092716862583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923033297136543,0.19917347507559355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654577278185657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888324054339379,0.1987778713116201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20291152658905615,0.0,0.12990393595487348,0.16361076833620591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490100749231234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21168319201507854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15060690254457693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448525668374805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926130227288038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092120522574408,0.11052007917053668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ramesses_XII,2020/01/08,"Which private psychiatrists have the best fees for an assessment? I'm looking to get an assessment done for my mental state, I just want to make sure I'm okay and not silently suffering whilst thinking I'm just normal me.

Any suggestions?",3.73681818181818,6.761802681818183,4.201090909090908,80.6166363636364,79.0,8.065454545454546,29.25454545454545,8.841846274778883,2.9956781818181817,194,9,33,5,5,61,34,44,0.0,0.735,0.265,0.8913,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,1,1,9,10,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,3,4,9,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,18,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457538837290288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3792507854416082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3698218606600158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18880850972241972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034720016717811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412269906960681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36419062388220336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3540801259403825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3406006578568097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315606250507025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21315396842047676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moonunderwater9,2020/01/08,"Feel guilty about happiness Sometimes I don't have any weird thoughts and I go through life content and happy and it's fine, and all over Christmas it's been like that. But now I'm starting to see these intrusive thoughts coming back. When I'm happy and feel good my brain says why do you deserve to be happy. I think about my past actions and whether they were bad or not.

A few months ago, when I started uni, the overthinking was really bad and I convinced myself I was a terrible person, one day it was so bad I felt panicky and paralysed to do any of my uni work. I sometimes had to get reassurance from friends and family that I wasn't a bad person or just ask them if something really happened (an event from years earlier) . After that and before Christmas, I had constant thoughts everyday that my boyfriend would abandon me when there is no evidence of that. I don't think that now, but I'm scared these weird thoughts are slowly creeping back.

There are more that go a bit further back but these are recent ones and I thought it was linked to alcohol but now I've sorted out my mini alcohol problem/dependancy. So I don't know why.",3.0377083333333346,5.3122831875,3.636071428571431,87.99226190476195,76.5,6.766666666666668,28.07738095238095,7.793537801064563,1.7775291666666666,910,39,178,14,21,286,124,224,0.10099999999999999,0.7929999999999999,0.106,-0.2415,0,0,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,2,1,16,19,0,1,6,0,21,4,1,0,1,39,44,24,0,2,10,0,3,1,1,1,3,1,0,2,14,13,2,1,12,0,0,4,6,9,0,2,15,5,23,10,15,27,4,28,0,1,1,0,9,3,0,4,22,119,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902165905015107,0.21753110246317373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13841974299927254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514503609404527,0.0,0.0,0.2347739802876393,0.33990845773243206,0.0,0.0,0.08660225497121465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111094753132228,0.0,0.0,0.1136135436734193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766936724323916,0.0,0.10998163588649017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563586879059735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594355482992263,0.0,0.1029200762184671,0.0,0.09771908715671423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863040983303675,0.0,0.05317276169818248,0.0,0.11568112199413833,0.0853632784444636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999849208562047,0.4333616471333608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05593237849810105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188604991407263,0.04972167979415842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812351080290712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792951526881922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971548853288548,0.0,0.17773042037173176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738405968549993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13039817685500862,0.0,0.10048963621812204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093484165201285,0.1018936191908138,0.0,0.08110077336605921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835066707346475,0.20131435565667136,0.0,0.14407245012141906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042545542682324,0.0,0.4039862977717473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18367057339816265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409274998333562,0.0,0.0,0.0722973938262464,0.0,0.0,0.06553917746593667
mentalhealth,untitled-png,2020/01/08,"I want my life to be exciting but I never put in the effort My life isn't terrible or anything but I just don't feel fulfilled.

I feel like my life would be more exciting if I put in the effort but I guess I don't know where to start.

I used to be this energetic leader who could make any day exciting, but as soon as I hit puberty life just went to shit.

I have friends but it feels like all they want to do is get drunk. Which is really boring in my opinion.

I guess I just want my life to be a badass movie haha

Anyone feel similar?",0.2943678160919525,2.224805103448276,2.7265517241379307,92.73195402298849,84.17241379310346,6.625287356321839,19.149425287356323,7.793537801064563,0.5430770114942525,416,11,98,8,12,143,63,116,0.11900000000000001,0.608,0.273,0.9638,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,2,5,10,1,0,3,1,13,7,1,2,2,27,29,9,0,6,10,0,4,2,1,1,5,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,5,1,0,3,4,3,0,0,1,4,18,7,11,21,2,11,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,5,6,64,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10678311847439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979628557853367,0.0,0.12921908364982773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253725468713931,0.0,0.0,0.10126883060710076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175884148921612,0.22435892463736826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213179592297774,0.0,0.08203964534246201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3459638589166213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.086297426513045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5545608175757613,0.153430021156251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481612715883253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110819258971832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157091608758085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005949271848166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611850137201154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114386702980653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13562011555279913,0.0,0.0,0.2778541496608897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556474854724033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154682132849036,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,erichguzman,2020/01/08,"Beating Your Demons After several years of depression, I couldn't believe I am okay now. Honestly, I couldn't remember my depressive episodes. (Not sure if any of you have experienced the same). I have no memory of the extreme sadness that I went through. I feel like I was a different person back then. It wasn't me who was controlling my life, it was my demons.

I couldn't even relate anymore to suicidal thoughts. Before when I was still drowning, I used to lock myself up and just stare at a blank wall for days cursing God, life, and everything in between. I was bad to everybody because I used to believe that my life was a hopeless case. Happiness couldn't be found anywhere. I had so many questions to the point that I wanted to get rid of my own brain. I wanted to die so bad. Bad things were easier to believe than the good things because they were all I ever experience. 

Now that I am better, I could no longer say the things that I've said before. Depression was an illness. It was just like a fever that when it died down, I was me again.

7 years of fighting my demons; I won.",3.660098955470037,5.313256719626171,4.482963166575043,85.34298790544256,72.92523364485982,8.025948323254536,28.476085761407372,8.671277953709913,2.1241921935129198,854,34,171,16,17,275,119,214,0.213,0.659,0.129,-0.9677,1,0,0,0,2,1,28.0,0,2,1,4,13,18,1,0,10,1,23,6,1,3,3,25,34,8,4,8,4,0,1,2,0,0,5,2,0,1,14,2,0,1,5,0,0,1,8,9,0,0,18,5,32,9,22,10,3,20,3,5,1,0,9,6,0,2,15,124,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835099571502252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426355285959773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859417847453686,0.2886022492698205,0.1404695038469418,0.0,0.1960810722845104,0.3894277510000415,0.0,0.10189940338878448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861943073498386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292248128046201,0.09199079426639767,0.0,0.0,0.07430494469840042,0.0,0.29770674206227704,0.0,0.2391525384714284,0.1203764507036016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760992414261047,0.10421968743828404,0.0,0.0,0.10354892941647477,0.1127035932584416,0.0,0.0,0.05825679398079281,0.08231050653903428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632866279039578,0.0,0.0,0.060195731240334775,0.0,0.0,0.09663791766551096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264983239341624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24414191791197015,0.11257767240663936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681118581432355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060237870148256,0.0,0.0,0.10891659017878014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129068559880968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051754249129838,0.0,0.10959703070609916,0.0916245803390375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301615588289305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201183995248267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602786875187574,0.0,0.10858994486409622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296336554678654,0.0,0.0,0.09146882662774004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990196810949414,0.0,0.0,0.13591504974763574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680661093839916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14839096509019506
mentalhealth,selfskeptic03,2020/01/08,"Mental health rapidly deteriorating after a break up. Need advice. So before I started dating this girl I remember telling myself If it didn’t work out that I didn’t have anything to live for. Fast forward to two months later, I’ve fallen in love and been dumped so she can focus on fixing herself before being in a relationship. Aside from a few miscommunication errors. Nothing I did in the relationship was wrong it was all her internally apparently. After I found this out I’ve been rapidly deteriorating mentally and I don’t know what to do. I know I should seek help but I don’t know where to start. Live in Florida USA",3.4765686274509804,6.118503092436978,5.432121848739495,73.7796673669468,76.89915966386555,7.328011204481792,25.04271708683473,8.344100000000001,1.9528145658263307,504,18,88,10,12,173,78,119,0.069,0.89,0.042,-0.2263,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,1,0,4,0,14,2,0,0,1,14,22,6,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,8,0,13,1,16,12,2,20,0,0,0,1,9,10,0,1,9,63,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17418459873637704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14668520358281265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30335656913887604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19544277926219691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18947224323276488,0.0,0.0,0.11947774013777487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938859002678517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147974080191307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608782878793422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.359269721422774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227807159014533,0.0,0.0,0.13217069439635612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103643038622274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3827492573951238,0.20192338526764292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523336383723065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557990380094803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17412511072619485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976869043698733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948892451137773,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FallenAK907,2020/01/08,"Vent/rant. Aviation Technician So... this might be a bit of a scatter session. But here are some basic facts.

I am 11+ year member of the USAF. Aircraft Maintenance (Fighter Avionics)  
Never been fully deployed, (activated, selected, then stood down twice)  
Currently A Reservist finishing out the last 3/4 of a year on my second contract. Have done 6 years on active. I will not be reenlisting.  
Have been stationed in Alaska, South Korea, and England

So in general, my career field is pretty demanding. People trust you with their lives to ensure they can accomplish their mission with the assets of the aircraft, defend themselves, and return home. There are some thing you can slack off on while at home station, but when you are generating for a deployment or a Real world tasker (think Lybia) we run everything through the wringer. This is vital and a timed metric.

Not to mention, even on local sorties, we are chasing metrics. The busiest squadron I worked for had 28 aircraft that are combat coded, and some shops would have like 60% manning of what they actually needed. This drives long days for the worker bees (3&5 levels), and even longer for the front line supervisors (7 levels) who not only have to man the aircraft repairs, but also do other duties like programs and performance reports for their troops. 

Its a high octane, long day, where you have to keep your head on a swivel, cause even on the ground planes can seriously injury, or kill a person if they are not in the right place at the right time. You are basically on an adrenaline high as the plane is running.   
The flight line is run on JP-8, adrenaline, caffeine, nicotine, and hate. hah. But I love it.

But here comes the not so fun stuff.  
It puts an intense amount of stress on the workers. When 12hr days become the normal. Weekend duty comes in every weekend. Beef up crews for said weekend duty. It wears down the moral of the unit. And it starts to affect the mental states of people. The Officer core sees it. Some of them try to fix it. I had a commander who made the maximum amount of time you could be on shift to 10 hours. The fleet became healthier, and the morale came back. Literally the month after he left, we went back to 12s and it was awful again.

My colleges around me were being diagnosed with clinical depression. Most of us are away from home, halfway around the world. Morale is low, drinking ensues. People get DUIs or ARIs. Group punishment, ect., ect. I am pretty sure I was an alcoholic while I was at my last duty station. But not the kind that would drink every night. I was the binge drinker sort. I would walk down to the pub or ride my bike, starting at like 10-11am and closing down the pub at like 2 am Sunday morning. Somehow stumble the two miles to my empty house and then pass out. I was incredibly lonely there.

Fast forward to my separation from active duty. Basically what happened, was denied extension, re-enlistment due to the Air Force ""Hunger Games"" brought on from the Sequestration. I wasn't the greatest troop, but I didn't get in any serious trouble, Pt was my main issue. And still is.  
But anyway, my flight chief went to bat for me with the senior. Senior wouldn't have it. Wouldn't even route it to the chief. I was devastated. I had just gotten back from a TDY from Utah and Nevada that was 6 weeks long. I had 28 days so out-process, move out of my house, ship my crap, and do taps. I still talk to that flight chief. Even though he has retired. I understand it was completely out of his hands. It just sucked. Basically during these 28 days, I made a generic resume. it wasn't special.

Arrived home back in Alaska. Unemployed. Living with my parents. Basically the lowest time of my life so far. In the first 18 months of being back home, I was unemployed for half of it. Finally got picked up by the local telecom that I have friends that still work at. Use them as reffs. Boom job. This is while I'm awaiting training for my reserves job. Two years of waiting for a slot for training. So I basically work all the overtime I can stand. I'm talking 12hr days 6-7 days a week sometimes, and I was only making 12/hr for the first 3-4 months. I do not wish Customer Service at a call center on anyone. Like there are good calls and then there are the real crap ones. That make you go I want to go home and its the 3rd call of the shift. And you are only like 10 minutes in. But it paid the bills and got me out of debt from being unemployed for so long.

At this point, I don't really drink that much anymore, mostly because I cant afford it. Have beers here and there. And maybe 1 or 2 every couple of weeks.

As time goes on at the call center, I get pretty deep into my depression. I try to date but, that doesn't go so well. I keep seeing my friends from high school, being more successful, and getting married, havin' kids and the such.(this is around the 8 years post high school time frame.) Work is literally driving me mad. I feel like crap. I dread going there. 1 night, I'm over at one of my best friend's house, having a couple of drinks with them (I was their best man at their wedding).  I don't know what triggered it, but I was talking about how I feel like I'm not appreciated in my current work at the call center, getting literally screamed at for things I can't control, and how I literally had peoples' lives in my hands when I worked on airplanes. I break down. I cried for like 30 min straight. I love that man and his wife, I basically do anything I can for them, as they do the same for me.

Fast forward like 2-3 months, his dad, basically told me to apply for the current job I have now, well used to. I was laid off today. Back working on Fighters, but as a contractor. It has made me much happier. But, I think I still will go get checked out for depression.  

Its like a thing that lurks in the shadows, and likes to rear it's head at inopportune times. I don't know... maybe i just need some therapy or something.

Sorry for the longish rant/vent. But it takes awhile to decompress from the military. Even if you don't go into combat.",2.9967403108032187,5.216235482993199,3.738964925419712,87.47243961804907,76.39795918367345,6.492467078574549,24.394433002558824,7.506554834225942,1.155075728640079,4752,160,932,64,109,1507,500,1176,0.111,0.789,0.1,-0.9405,16,2,8,0,2,0,198.0,4,10,13,17,54,48,8,2,76,2,95,20,8,14,4,142,155,75,1,13,33,3,4,12,3,8,4,3,6,6,49,51,7,9,7,13,5,25,21,19,2,9,41,9,107,29,148,98,19,199,3,5,2,2,62,92,4,18,94,614,156,32,0.0,0.0,0.04201174108172378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046008618292031685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03442801277169937,0.0,0.046645935109386825,0.0,0.02927627841546378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04269520196558595,0.030102385765703638,0.0,0.035427452612097635,0.11497403167079932,0.0,0.0,0.04044800039183427,0.19862219832740646,0.0,0.02624359949720868,0.04754664550816708,0.0,0.0,0.0903591138857785,0.0,0.04700073796481582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21980033890726608,0.049239080496637284,0.0,0.044225420441820366,0.0,0.0741695584258988,0.04513834272703148,0.0,0.04828555863686205,0.03437286380377602,0.09527062276048733,0.04728969926231511,0.1943511451448272,0.0,0.1112397537164264,0.0436960410732076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04405630378051508,0.0,0.1686950650087586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706093886004621,0.0,0.10881742678400542,0.0,0.038691624267879934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043535939897366115,0.061511542615726826,0.0,0.04716046292613869,0.0,0.07323862274913545,0.0,0.0,0.09978370369634784,0.0,0.13495478681274076,0.0,0.14680186488706698,0.03610928689861834,0.0688639222515279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038070015941069714,0.0,0.0,0.04250412694119273,0.08836586106925545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18194373968229133,0.25910305990111904,0.0,0.04239673990569683,0.14902584328716714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044934246454196025,0.12816495853933138,0.07653173302037562,0.047629751663848766,0.04483117865879747,0.04731960484446535,0.07018491467586413,0.0,0.0,0.046775232600829414,0.0,0.030408321325714024,0.2523915810384313,0.0,0.11404494096140387,0.1523957568155091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777107408375117,0.1222082012128597,0.0574739933610122,0.0,0.08650139275891203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043385463290716686,0.0456704982334941,0.0,0.0,0.13745216329620635,0.045756590746697995,0.06329514107558322,0.06384380834691904,0.03320372372811483,0.0,0.0,0.08080123137435219,0.042181015376517736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834518693971475,0.0982270861374469,0.0,0.0,0.047803240181550924,0.0,0.0,0.1193850691408257,0.03759062946481255,0.04497931970490948,0.0,0.040697280092454005,0.0,0.041231129611046524,0.13139558049318775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04327832631301795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800333497366258,0.027579688039849788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353094430052425,0.04095153041998542,0.0,0.0,0.08714018429481178,0.06861243257146223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033142901345975195,0.04257871743964574,0.04819227090957188,0.06094369300736024,0.0,0.13752291055831425,0.0,0.04931498077639156,0.0,0.04928330073686685,0.0,0.0,0.040575227282677664,0.0,0.03236912927336169,0.103808722236961,0.0,0.0,0.04923277581945091,0.0,0.08580387230163718,0.05517091511374077,0.04229756537365968,0.0,0.175724423229891,0.0,0.04080748441795407,0.041137247025023575,0.0,0.05845784998872635,0.0,0.08410949377516265,0.04481779624439822,0.05178526830617746,0.07436479320677186,0.0,0.0,0.025392701145344018,0.0,0.10359917840261576,0.0,0.07741636139741177,0.0798177495999623,0.0,0.0,0.04950673189884165,0.0,0.0,0.21939240039820304,0.0,0.0,0.09174696836624292,0.0,0.0,0.13861774086831935
mentalhealth,peakgemsdc,2020/01/08,"Has anyone overcome their anxiety and depression using religion? Is it possible that the belief in the afterlife can cure some forms of anxiety and depression? There is a book out there by Mr.FOG called ""Why God is my only best friend"". He claims that he overcame anxiety, depression and even psychosis by believing that God is his only best friend.",6.116935483870968,8.46212714516129,6.375032258064518,71.44254838709679,67.87096774193549,11.411612903225805,33.36774193548387,11.20814326018867,4.71811870967742,281,13,44,10,5,90,43,62,0.204,0.602,0.19399999999999998,0.2406,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,2,3,7,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,1,0,7,7,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,4,5,7,4,2,1,3,0,0,7,2,0,1,0,31,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4407061315693123,0.0,0.0,0.13427149310367126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21635149061410705,0.4030462313319753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19608359230713432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49618418753395094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12683367537260182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967230346680744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29209417976707513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21648441118214348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658518347338973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17327675778891244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Technicow_Theo,2020/01/08,My thoughts sometimes feel like they are physically shrinking So sometimes late at night when I'm just rambling to myself in my head I get this wierd sensation where I can see my thoughts in my head become tiny. I feel as if my senses are disproportionate to my body and everything just feels.. small. Can someone explain what this could be?,5.429523809523811,7.517015444444446,4.870031746031747,82.5888571428572,69.15873015873015,7.5796825396825405,31.647619047619052,8.238735603445708,2.3355295238095235,275,12,50,4,5,83,45,63,0.0,0.9590000000000001,0.040999999999999995,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,3,0,0,11,15,5,0,2,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,11,1,6,11,0,8,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,1,4,33,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23888345129505764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402576170683021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726958494880687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943941290187367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3280993475008853,0.15452288418542426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130064483626528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4439670063634122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439928543563353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567196926984106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029804291480482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17236099959570178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18326805949875116,0.0,0.4278472588335387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3434319019011775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Inno_jo,2020/01/08,"The merry go round Sometimes i feel like a super-hero an angel, other times i feel like the devil’s in me,

so much darkness I’m on my psycho path..

Sometimes so creative, sometimes destructive as fuck.. focus other times distorted…

I’m an emotional fuck and sometimes i don’t give a fuck..

Pain in my head like someone’s living in there.

Hey at list stop making a noise, someone really needs his sanity.

Yet I’m still holding unto it, maybe i should let go… I don’t know

at this moment, addiction comes in and breaks momentum..

I am a star I’m great I’m extraordinary,

i know all that, but yet i feel i live in a circle, caged with my demons,

i run away from them sometimes,

put them into good use, other times, they come back to hunt me.

And we start all over again.",0.7292699490662109,3.1434090645161312,2.665127334465197,90.48505942275044,87.38709677419355,5.3276740237691005,18.480475382003394,6.8360192770164,0.25274193548387114,595,16,122,8,19,198,97,155,0.071,0.8079999999999999,0.121,0.743,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,3,0,8,11,4,0,9,0,5,6,1,2,2,22,26,7,0,2,1,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,8,0,2,5,0,0,5,2,6,0,0,0,4,20,5,16,24,3,28,3,0,1,3,7,11,3,0,14,71,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057429633445336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253416420431768,0.09210089853914977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063540641318541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473268006049324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181688114186304,0.17113701468853193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3321949219568372,0.0,0.1149007368046476,0.13614373194112533,0.10046302367941744,0.0,0.13205424838288715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229254626099028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165229751939792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247980365430405,0.0,0.1755505547197592,0.0,0.21153006310151712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995188567679777,0.0,0.12033180679308407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804966537447319,0.08881291463535014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745086698873972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040867861493665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673202908707658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029728396263976,0.0,0.5923111567376355,0.0,0.08477857359658701,0.0,0.09565383732634013,0.1001386948982015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20952829283694807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344862253611503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cyclicmadness,2020/01/08,"First day at job Almost couldn't go. 40 minutes walking and swallowing my tears. Got there, in 30 minutes got panic attack, couldn't stop crying. Then felt empty, then crying again. Got permission to go home so i walked fast in the rain thinking how i'm gonna kill myself or cut myself.
Got home, i feel empty, don't know how to be proud myself for not cutting and that i still got at work. I was doing good and now i want to destroy it.
At friday have to go again..
Nothing didn't even happen. I just felt ashamed, stupid, weak.",1.5253186066270177,3.742735074766358,2.6503653355989836,93.38611724723877,81.42990654205606,4.63857264231096,19.073067119796097,5.565023196281405,-0.2724317757009347,411,10,85,2,11,131,73,107,0.254,0.62,0.126,-0.9512,1,0,0,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,0,3,10,11,6,2,1,0,8,2,0,2,0,18,25,9,1,3,3,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,2,3,1,1,5,0,0,5,5,9,0,1,9,3,10,2,10,12,0,20,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,2,10,49,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501359703247981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17057012419396564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293881249481325,0.09669420655992282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902915343489392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758104927412578,0.0,0.2879178648041915,0.0,0.0,0.12753270266800784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556306752228268,0.1257564595491972,0.5995744998604982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13258501706699766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007895038471397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878509850229765,0.0,0.16587835022248235,0.0,0.08239910676184939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14386449715398258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591375263420353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197364710307825,0.1253504749614172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607083870519206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843420816907617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915281237974103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sir0soot,2020/01/08,"Should I Admit Myself? *Emergent* I'm an 18 year old guy with autism, ppd, depression, anxiety, and ptsd.

Hardly over a week ago I had to move back in with my family in Hawai'i. I stayed behind in Georgia after they moved for months with my boyfriend who I honestly thought I could end up marrying. Then I had to suddenly move because he crashed our only car and my health quickly deteriorated.

In the course of less than a month I've lost my job, become wheelchair/crutch bound with constant pain, had to breakup and move across an ocean from my best and only irl friend, and had to move back in with my very loud and fairly ignorant family. 

Tonight I finally snapped. It's the closest I've gotten to killing myself in years. I had a full plan to leave the house and have first responders find me so my siblings wouldn't. I was actually going to do it.
If my friend (the ex) hadn't called and talked me into calming down I genuinely think I might have committed suicide.

I'm doing everything I can to self sooth but I'm already back to feeling like shit. I know its not going to stop and I don't trust myself right now. I'm seriously considering admitting myself for the first time since age 12. I know that I need help but I'm also so anxious about everything else. Is it worth it?",2.9658498023715403,5.098568826086961,3.99802371541502,85.9909486166008,76.15415019762847,7.403952569169961,26.019762845849804,8.321376580360154,1.741670355731226,1015,38,203,19,23,328,155,253,0.11699999999999999,0.777,0.105,-0.6194,1,0,0,0,0,2,28.0,1,0,1,5,9,14,2,0,10,0,18,3,1,0,1,36,35,16,2,5,4,1,2,1,2,3,2,1,0,2,7,15,0,3,8,0,1,8,4,7,0,2,10,3,32,7,34,21,3,47,0,2,0,0,15,14,1,2,25,128,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.09994175572224907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078425419405883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301692165536563,0.08190081995741158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834679429903063,0.11569920746690635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362512325737593,0.0,0.06243091437511428,0.1131087431379226,0.0,0.0,0.10747767474911828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10457663126127316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067366582458413,0.0,0.08176962604498103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820943864957345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855541536833875,0.0,0.09070882806451708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18408705573784034,0.0,0.1930945078181704,0.0,0.05178383659340777,0.0731649225658258,0.0,0.11219005316498884,0.0936049762425456,0.17422740300121167,0.0,0.0,0.1582503411841062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640901441951435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140643344197027,0.0,0.0,0.09174325480465,0.0,0.0,0.10886179953784106,0.0,0.0,0.06864626487867287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11817255559690412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163056523947386,0.0,0.11330644442085674,0.0,0.1125686359686778,0.0,0.0,0.1084421432651211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0500345401249994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179749930691027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864557527588176,0.0,0.0,0.1634925163054025,0.5442519040324643,0.0,0.07593903672992054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746676525090026,0.0,0.0,0.15578164889604615,0.1089762238887924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971704261364913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08746140345640452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684063488954078,0.0,0.10512698852220836,0.0847183133879895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916020540484317,0.0,0.08562308827700654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202481488792976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231687692148904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656230613073675,0.0,0.0813056546339177,0.05971870491670346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450266892907864,0.0,0.0,0.08215071560431106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190313031476167
mentalhealth,jackeddigger,2020/01/08,"Destroy the world If you could nuke the entire world and stop all the sufferings would you?

There is so much amazing good in the world yet so many more suffer so bad....",2.91,5.028847272727276,2.645454545454548,95.68818181818185,76.27272727272728,5.612121212121212,20.090909090909093,6.42735559955562,-0.04489090909090887,132,3,28,1,3,39,25,33,0.217,0.622,0.161,-0.3642,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,0,5,6,1,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,6,3,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,3,6,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,1,2,20,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807080428725457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640474251610089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38243810567794656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4622724672053634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3351834933701039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3812034655072419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239013173369443,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cony-mcgregy,2020/01/08,"Anxiety and Panic attacks for 7 days Hello 
I really need your help I’ve been having anxiety attacks the moment i wake up for 7 days now, whole days are in tremors, pressure, numbness and everything else. I’ve been taking PROXETINE FOR 9 days now and it’s going only worse. I’ve been on this therapy for year and a half. i stoped i was feeling great and it started again after a month and a half not taking paroxetine. Im afraid that will not go away or i might go crazy i cant work i cant eat i cant do anything. 
Please help",0.4062577962577976,2.6642741441441444,2.7291891891891886,90.70359667359669,86.83783783783785,5.937907137907138,21.151074151074152,7.321109707123232,0.816324462924463,414,14,88,7,13,141,69,111,0.21899999999999997,0.677,0.10400000000000001,-0.8669,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,3,7,2,3,4,0,12,3,1,0,0,12,20,7,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,1,0,0,3,5,6,0,2,4,1,9,1,9,14,1,19,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,12,53,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24559595446792135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13209494608831884,0.0,0.0,0.3652311807478819,0.1508145812695307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41409056128962574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16425285861282402,0.13409453584259004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442657500017321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811641426299315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736830197791295,0.0,0.0,0.1769747553158049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21518742527215326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733900160009306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028720828547494,0.0,0.0,0.12812617590048714,0.0,0.0,0.1190241437057121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220833063162242,0.0,0.1883365797146261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17620364150717252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283373870105933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361745269092954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24138333811957174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18356953120100705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792157473832728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686105856987825,0.0,0.16358441500174153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337013618999252
mentalhealth,thesupremeking93,2020/01/08,"Is something wrong with me. (I shared this with someone close to me and they said i have a serious problem) I’ll try to make this as short as possible. I’m a pretty big, muscular guy who loves to fight. I was a boxer for 3 years and I currently do mma. Two days ago I heard a woman screaming for help from my apartment. I ran outside and my neighbor was beating on his gf. I gave him a verbal warning. He ran inside and I ran up to the woman help her but her bf came back outside with a machete and threatened me with it. He even accused me of sleeping with his gf although me and her are practically strangers. Me and the guy got into a physical altercation because we came close to me with the machete I got it from him and beat him until he was to injured to fight back. (He did mange to cut me a few time with the machete in the struggle nothing big but the cuts were deep. One was deep enough for me to see my bone). The woman called the police when they came the guy took off running. They managed to catch him, then spoke to me and the victim separately. After that the officers took him away.  After this incident I cleaned my cuts but honestly getting cut like that made me more alive than I’ve felt in over a decade. I’ve been into light bdsm but never been someone into self harm. This level of masochism has never been my thing. So why did I get a rush out of it now. Honestly this feeling is confusing idk if this is normal or if I’m slowly losing it? Can anyone give me some insight on this",2.9550108225108254,4.324943418831175,4.20331168831169,87.78449134199137,74.22727272727272,6.821645021645023,26.794372294372288,7.333567415737692,1.2864476190476188,1175,43,246,13,24,386,163,308,0.168,0.7509999999999999,0.08,-0.9785,1,0,1,0,2,0,26.0,1,0,3,3,6,20,7,2,21,0,18,5,3,2,2,44,43,23,0,4,7,0,2,1,4,0,1,4,2,7,15,26,0,0,3,0,0,11,2,15,0,2,26,8,42,5,44,17,4,47,0,1,1,1,42,21,0,5,16,172,57,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096707364961296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650823298119249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11623945918289158,0.1902668174086529,0.0,0.07541885341713435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633243807006525,0.4245097927323591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978947143549611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783632356310376,0.0,0.08171620710676357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06255678970115852,0.0,0.1187910582591444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292776839504972,0.11868395344936115,0.0,0.0,0.19790113237207896,0.0,0.0,0.3675081655874121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585445336940674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06044357487394481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384115654000964,0.0,0.0,0.11166255933726972,0.11706730517441205,0.08258437797476241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908417153691184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121979745978995,0.11871313281976288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383619598122727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13947624656919147,0.0,0.1258682017041783,0.0,0.11838378605665635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768650372372508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858920067825516,0.0,0.12906743818155228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380982475779655,0.0,0.20965591448435011,0.0952460663292972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293395033893117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219438633571058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07214240408705715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27491600067247,0.08399808151030337,0.0,0.12085692708984275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163848547848647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13526891778606018,0.0,0.07967192976461969
mentalhealth,throwaway137473882,2020/01/08,"What's happening to me? I'm a 17 year old male. Also, sorry for my english, it's not my first language.

So it all started this september (when high school started after summer break). It's probably fur to the anxiety that I've felt as I'm kind of a loner in my class, so of course coming back to school was not the best thing for me. I started feeling very alien to others, and I don't know exactly why or when, but I started to believe that I'm experiencing the onset of schizophrenia. Of course, I researched schizophrenia a lot.

Then it just passed around the end of october, and I diagnosed myself with asperger's syndrome. Same thing happened, I was researching it a lot, I was convinced that I have it.

Then I had a winter break from school and during that I came to the conclusion that I'm a psychopath, which was the scariest. I was telling myself stuff like remember when you fell in love with that girl? Then I told myself that I'm just very good at pretending that I have feelings.

During these months I've had moments when I was afraid that I may be a pedophile as well.

And two days ago, when winter break ended, I started believing that I have ocd. There's some sort of ""paradox"" in my mind. So there's the thought that I have ocd. Then ask myself why do I have ocd? Because I think that I have ocd. Why do I think that? Because I think about havind ocd. So I should tell someone. But I actually don't have ocd, I'm just overthinking. Then the cycle starts again. Am I overthinking this? And if I'm overthinking, is it because I have ocd?

What frustrates me is that I don't really have compulsions, just this self-diagnosing thought loop bullshit.

Also, when I was 14-15 years old old, I was convincing myself that I was gay, when I'm actually not (like I was watching a lots of gay porn, joining online gay communities). Around that time, I was also afraid that I have cancer for a very long time.

Well, the only compulsion I have is that I'm researching ocd (and the other mental illnesses that I've mentioned) a lot. And it's going to sound kinf of bizarre, but when I'm sitting on the toilet, for like 30 minutes I'm sticking up paper towels up my ass... (like lots of it)

Anyways, I decided that I'm gonna tell my mom (who's a psychologist). I just needed to write this down somewhere and get others opinion.",3.913639944098591,5.1649001079913655,4.910515182314828,84.11114439080171,71.67818574514037,7.952458391563969,28.30447211281921,8.405096225971981,1.9338144327277345,1822,68,366,29,34,596,197,463,0.067,0.855,0.078,0.6918,1,0,0,0,0,0,72.0,0,1,0,3,30,15,1,2,22,0,36,9,1,0,2,55,74,35,0,3,13,1,3,4,0,3,3,1,0,2,44,14,0,0,12,1,0,5,6,3,2,2,18,6,52,12,38,52,9,60,0,0,1,6,13,11,1,11,44,251,96,8,0.0,0.0,0.15732594013426646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145520927289904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19338949077565445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061665832166569415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351859073910458,0.07535873864867121,0.0,0.0,0.061983513970946875,0.0,0.14741589578639194,0.0,0.0,0.18163797261030415,0.08459440251551258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219547239676593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943770484302879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05198627784722302,0.0,0.0,0.16363332166156058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427916845226154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815168866800629,0.0,0.07739749179085585,0.0,0.0,0.06856616080093339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042114990088192215,0.0,0.04581207699750359,0.0676111887133194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256493291254835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516806599784413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394209747344726,0.04430071884223871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15752637138430414,0.0,0.0,0.07133662250165324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3426553783973441,0.07275296765854854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123513361532701,0.0,0.08139233243938779,0.09440854345793616,0.06434150982935498,0.0,0.0,0.059770714753241284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25375744733673644,0.0,0.0,0.06130694370716507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869103722506888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05164033003343834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131453169677732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24474250051288265,0.0,0.0,0.08409299600085436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829992996950905,0.0,0.0,0.09023542148973182,0.3423337221011335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227827057041868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113680321244672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071063670094526,0.15495339870798092,0.0,0.12798943205542898,0.09400776809176692,0.0,0.0,0.07702556352232283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787434943284892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19953314413550485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495473794967748,0.0,0.21821184750746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381938877026736
mentalhealth,queenladyloki,2020/01/08,"Am I going crazy? I feel like I'm going crazy. Just found out a few months ago that I have panic attacks. I went on antidepressants to stop them. The antidepressants made everything worse. So I stopped taking them. Then the side effects of being off the medication was/is horrible. I can't tell if I'm still feeling the side effects or not.

My chest feels like there's a bubble in it that I can't get out. It's hard to eat food because now it's hard to swallow. I always have dry mouth and dry eyes now.

And I don't know when I can see my doctor again. I can't go to the ER because that was alot of money. It's also 2am where I am. I don't know if I should go to the immediate care tomorrow or what. Is it all just in my head?

I just want to feel normal again",0.1927143869596044,2.067438951807233,2.5772714386959628,93.97683557760456,84.18072289156626,5.592629340892984,18.800850460666197,6.794906146795322,-0.03191948972360015,590,15,141,7,17,202,92,166,0.16,0.77,0.07,-0.9209,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,2,13,5,1,1,9,0,14,9,4,3,1,29,34,10,0,5,8,0,6,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,4,3,2,9,0,1,5,6,2,1,0,4,8,20,3,14,28,3,26,0,0,2,0,3,9,0,5,14,89,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13673014985444926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335081105630755,0.12834538276379484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17547757718659174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18805437911761344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15726451117996648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15787775287882133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578326013476182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13862674172272085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31196651006550064,0.2203873549510134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18651539044989174,0.16912324451357025,0.0,0.0,0.08058739124092333,0.0,0.3506471937736218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763490010230349,0.0,0.15830133305779573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695396035529201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071402480359486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459516976994022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538704653686225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231180255484304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511287477547668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18097494653253896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291443108202273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318139496375866,0.25791383748310825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597411606451395,0.0,0.13481817491403686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097853837684657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298798212858102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719028562244694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,casteel23,2020/01/08,"I'm sorry, take care of her for me I'm probably going to kill myself after my girlfriend goes to bed. I can't take it anymore. I'm super broke and in debt, I'm a broken person, I'm disabled, I'm miserable. I need help, I've been seeking it but getting nowhere. I feel as though this is my only option. I'll leave her a note and won't kill myself in our home, I could never traumatize her that way. Hopefully my body won't be found. I have a plan and I'm finally not afraid. This probably sounds dramatic but I have been planning for a long time how to do it in a way that she won't have to find me. I know she will take good care of our pets and our home, I know she will live a long life, and I know she will someday move on. I love her but I can't live this way anymore. She deserves a love with someone who can be her shoulder and support her the way she would support them. 
Please world, take care of my love.",0.8312953657174766,2.41268151256282,2.7749329983249598,94.8588372417644,80.60804020100502,5.829257398101619,21.608319374651032,6.691623216298621,0.2622326074818533,707,21,168,7,18,237,99,199,0.09,0.665,0.245,0.9905,1,0,0,0,0,3,22.0,3,0,1,3,2,16,2,2,8,0,20,6,2,1,1,24,48,12,2,4,4,0,1,0,1,7,1,1,4,1,9,7,0,0,6,0,1,2,7,5,0,0,3,2,35,11,16,35,0,17,0,2,0,3,23,5,0,2,6,101,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21418264164800305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994611482646672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302912988376174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621660551499323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05460006150903444,0.0,0.0,0.1182914246313306,0.09869561231091403,0.0,0.0,0.11839911343188217,0.0,0.0,0.056417293223983485,0.0,0.061369915456599165,0.09057203268654876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237954024476727,0.0,0.21663393571887365,0.10725268642532873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389370599681035,0.0,0.17803589456310245,0.0,0.0,0.11433968747693928,0.0,0.0,0.07627244151312862,0.0,0.0,0.19070407287913935,0.19112525686728205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923798985144322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477012670924665,0.0,0.08006892399545228,0.08328408033261442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212685821723882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428764766676184,0.0,0.11853423633479697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328504860243285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149467133194644,0.0,0.0,0.12087948311789486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24507840533772274,0.0,0.0,0.32476275068109584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609393877925412,0.0,0.06296646166435214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3428513609138608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670888508626357,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AryamanMittal,2020/01/08,"Unable to eat 
I had one of the most important exams you can give as a student which ultimately decides your colleges which then decides your job. I am 17 nearly 18 and my exam did not go that well. I feel like a failure. I always compete with my friend named x and if he gets more then happy for him but i would like very bad as was always equal to him in academics. I feel very anxious about the results and i am unable to eat properly and barely eat anything the whole day and feel nauseous numerous times. I am scared if I get really bad marks I would fail my teachers my parents and most importantly myself.
I also feel really anxious before the exam as well as I stop eating 2 days before and go to the exam centre vomiting.",4.484178082191782,5.410163308219179,5.864273972602741,79.02284931506851,70.02739726027397,8.031780821917808,28.298630136986297,8.238735603445708,2.0065994520547936,577,20,107,8,10,195,88,146,0.20600000000000002,0.7040000000000001,0.09,-0.9679,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,3,0,2,4,10,0,1,7,0,9,5,0,1,0,25,18,17,0,4,4,1,4,2,1,2,1,0,0,0,3,8,4,1,6,0,0,2,1,4,2,1,3,4,22,6,14,13,5,10,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,4,8,77,25,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10370510753485776,0.2158084183985787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930031410745977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671565062982036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165548884480024,0.0,0.0,0.22069638148750828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16726583785478238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5307803574243009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622805654585332,0.09264347007043454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001905027230471,0.0,0.13550497160134006,0.12440094260853744,0.14740034794132828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804684911147658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12868746249999224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671026655944145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878745736189907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399437447686506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661527508379204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298323759557605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841834772656674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561749343229535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139992828601602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23319591917531735,0.0,0.0,0.1447831703745002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842420063280497,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,0nemorelight,2020/01/08,"Feelings of detachment, what's wrong with me? It happens most often when I'm out in public, like I am looking at myself, analysing my own actions in my head as I do them. For example, yesterday I was buying food from the shop and I completely felt out of my element. I was getting out my change but it was like looking at somebody elses arms, I didn't have control over them or myself, the only part of me I felt was real was my brain, which was analysing myself like it was someone else, if that makes sense. I became panicked and dropped my change, watched myself pick it up and laugh, then talk to the cashier, but as if it was just and act. I then went somewhere else and did the same thing, I heard my voice saying the usual stuff, like ordering the baguette and thanking her, telling her to have a nice day, but it didn't feel like me. Sometimes I get this, and it's kind of like being on autopilot. I was working on checkouts for half an hour yesterday and just felt completely engulfed in my own mind, like I wasn't there at all. I did my job, spoke to customers, helped them pack, but it honestly felt like I was someone else, like I wasn't even present at all. 

It's not all the time but it does feel scary when it does happen, and it's usually around people. I couldn't stand to sit around my friends and everything I said came out wrong because it felt forced. It's like I didn't even know who they were, and I had the increasing and unnerving feeling like they didn't know who I was either, then I realised that I don't even know who I am. I'm always trying to put on an act and be interested in what everybody else is saying that I've started to lose my identity. I went to sit on my own and felt more at peace, and stopped over analysing everything I said. I didn't feel truly myself again until I walked home, detouring around the quiet roads without traffic and artificial lights. I enjoyed it and started to come back to myself, then got home and slept all day and almost all night. I'm starting to feel a bit more normal now but it's scary how often I feel like I am not in control of myself and what I'm doing.

Any ideas on how to get a handle on this? For background I suffer with generalised anxiety as well as social anxiety (which I have improved on greatly since starting work and my current job), and I was diagnosed with depression a few years ago but I seem to have a handle on that too most of the time. I used to have a problem with some drugs but have been clean for almost a year now, and I am currently on no medication. It's just these recent intrusive feelings that have me worried. Any advice much appreciated.",5.315244360902256,5.430505815789477,5.688110902255641,83.89257988721808,67.90977443609023,8.830451127819549,30.910714285714285,8.567472430010655,2.1631586466165413,2082,76,431,29,32,667,226,532,0.09699999999999999,0.754,0.149,0.9841,4,0,1,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,5,5,22,28,0,0,19,0,42,8,4,7,5,99,88,47,0,5,18,0,14,12,1,0,3,8,3,0,35,36,1,3,19,1,2,10,13,6,1,1,39,26,68,22,63,46,20,78,0,3,3,0,22,30,0,11,45,306,103,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062313518417950575,0.0565266358060318,0.0,0.12770922339745142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05306022641383586,0.0,0.0,0.08672908560818841,0.0,0.09756495214345702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17030157477646318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04903378712155925,0.0,0.03887248500578185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06961832663207318,0.0,0.0,0.07118636794141008,0.0,0.07293379928723576,0.0,0.0,0.1349165385615615,0.05493063266917465,0.13371942755253527,0.0,0.14304285159563268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822503894308987,0.0,0.054923432014328914,0.06472335098738853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160791187403643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395083299921812,0.0,0.26635062048406444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635482607716345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462144012390382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579448251453442,0.13666798174541622,0.3673646645455729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710872517439707,0.0,0.04926713052669246,0.0,0.09994871182580596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05100123147067855,0.07030463335763862,0.0,0.0,0.1127799655681006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544454029263383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04274246066885765,0.0,0.1279293491736874,0.0,0.06279880305495156,0.0,0.0,0.07198650287229949,0.0,0.0,0.12656013973024086,0.0,0.0,0.06640473691084141,0.10513595686397637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738468860015001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070984059877596,0.07134027178699685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04256574913410758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423972326450507,0.0,0.0,0.06438767418108604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046876942750577216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05984210846119437,0.06247926805645467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04849856734840145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905471474399764,0.0,0.04420882042671568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061017527314590085,0.0,0.06410462447641993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258213892658888,0.0,0.0,0.06296337555216397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213162662678204,0.10142201767213924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058052147672873686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05274968979474797,0.0,0.0,0.06500361955004816,0.10806112825781604,0.0,0.06306835140561018,0.0,0.18054175783909204,0.0,0.0,0.05331304608480005,0.0,0.0,0.07299929909131021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051254440142060084,0.05573619191898861,0.058709164089590773,0.0,0.0,0.04236473912859113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436746633218015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04329440207694656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055075225279134686,0.1404632619323627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057335243740919785,0.11822746627610273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061470241016832176,0.0,0.0928479755418212,0.0647596727628739,0.0,0.0,0.13944096840889786,0.0,0.08212922246450563
mentalhealth,Throwawaythnxbb,2020/01/08,"Will the numbness ever end? 20f rape victim with anxiety and depression

I feel so numb. I feel like life is passing me by even when I try to keep up. Lately, I’ve been feeling so down that I’m not sure I’ll ever be happy again. Does it ever end? 

I only feel strongly emotion when it’s anxiety. I’m numb until my eyes are wet with tears, until my throat tenses and my chest aches. Even then, I still don’t feel connected to my body. 

I don’t know if I want to be alive any more. I don’t want to commit suicide, but I’m not holding on to life like I should. I need help and I don’t know where to find it.",0.11726431463273455,1.8203706165413536,2.506766917293234,95.3124233661076,83.4360902255639,5.295315211104684,18.501445922498554,6.297961479604792,-0.2388514748409487,464,11,111,4,13,159,79,133,0.179,0.6709999999999999,0.15,-0.1917,0,0,0,0,0,2,15.0,0,0,0,1,12,11,2,0,1,0,11,10,4,0,5,28,25,12,1,5,4,0,6,2,0,2,5,0,0,0,4,5,0,2,8,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,1,7,16,5,14,20,1,18,0,1,1,1,1,4,0,1,15,67,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712053973531988,0.0,0.24100819833550816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174971722077755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13567369332291412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13784879288004434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17719134267899234,0.2790359378523434,0.0,0.0,0.20808393666526884,0.427463712524133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3982399430614604,0.1125339353493166,0.0,0.0,0.14397249358633352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16768537686765106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055838516999522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14001302405451538,0.0,0.0,0.17314023111365762,0.0,0.17769197256817093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22252526408103726,0.15391484077889064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680076121403332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980277837173522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579748180354033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17230378758038614,0.0,0.14846286760642055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694727577209934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185821422615668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sharosea,2020/01/08,"Journey to self-love Hello, I’m new to this group and I just want to vent out the demons that’s been taking control over my life since eternity. I’m currently in a situation where I don’t feel self-love. I push myself down and when people compliment me I just let it pass and destroy my self more. I have many many insecurities one of which is my appearance. I don’t ever look at myself in the mirror especially my appearance. The face staring back at me reminds me of my insecurities and I don’t understand why I feel so empty and down. I can’t push myself to accept what I am or who I’m ever going to be. 

My close friends don’t know my struggles or anyone who I’m closely associated with, it’s because I don’t want to tell them and disclose what I’m truly feeling. It’s like I’m putting on a fake mask just to please everybody into thinking I’m happy.

I’m so miserable...

Thank you for listening to my short rant.",2.1152386818601805,3.9461484450261746,4.483911302740996,82.92646442870344,77.63874345549738,7.426054819833692,25.37141977209732,8.313332769828598,1.6872584539574995,727,27,150,14,17,254,107,191,0.10400000000000001,0.752,0.14400000000000002,0.682,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,1,1,12,12,1,4,5,0,12,2,1,1,2,30,35,11,0,2,5,0,3,1,1,0,1,1,0,1,10,11,0,1,7,0,0,8,6,6,0,1,1,6,27,6,22,32,1,29,1,1,2,0,10,14,0,4,8,96,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980523175221586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075320036218867,0.0,0.09572943976043603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17613245002150452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.284101303620911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382107189371349,0.11218860267300657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213278441865254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924881082541597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16717080106620938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630445800561183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058288795850262,0.11092120061028753,0.07672126129785654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318731025675232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3184255391958044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516691226877077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641360494490996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887098191149183,0.0,0.0,0.17238152531692744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786744238934167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4914773821910556,0.0,0.0,0.12990417903143905,0.17651827358990682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417112747485582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807368921331188,0.0,0.13725889728920887,0.14458029596677682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062416924688107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16348300568410787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18525119276465976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170315758381838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iristurner,2020/01/08,"I got really fat! So , I’ve suffered from mental health issues , well, all my life really , and I’ve been taking the same medication for quite about 10 years now,
I have my ups and downs but I’ve been pretty stable. About 2 years ago my best friend and I stopped speaking , this affected my mental health greatly, I was so upset by it. Then in September my beautiful mum died, we were very close and this obviously knocked me for 6. There are many other stressful things that happened too. The main thing that has manifested in me is that I have got really fat , really really, to the point my health and work and of course my mental health is badly affected. What happened to losing weight with stress?! Do any of you pile on the pounds with mental health issues?",2.8605057471264352,5.428310131034486,3.7234482758620717,85.58471264367817,78.72413793103449,7.1770114942528735,20.011494252873558,8.238735603445708,1.113473563218391,599,15,114,12,15,191,91,145,0.177,0.6859999999999999,0.13699999999999998,-0.7333,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,1,0,4,8,10,0,3,4,0,11,10,2,2,2,17,16,10,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,9,1,0,0,10,10,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,6,2,16,4,17,10,4,13,0,2,0,0,5,7,0,0,6,76,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929093041134727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127559313723343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751344429735232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099934791261217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877806257769007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097730826595884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765508356558725,0.11555533896666174,0.0,0.0,0.1853693921362914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5570500154124239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21879249969871645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403164801346615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172575532310135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626267704704057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558682468611286,0.4225024213386532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908099439748508,0.0,0.0,0.1066312437024815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148021171805077,0.0,0.0,0.3357254968824588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762732721093093,0.2401230412901093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880540195559863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926455644353775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648068143127031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763249114698444,0.0942383625203602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07630421192529943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499067824842267
mentalhealth,toolameformymain,2020/01/08,"I have such a weird feeling I've been diagnosed with PTSD, but was never really educated and didn't want to become a Google dr., so maybe it's related?

I feel different ways through out the year. Periods of time when I know I'm in a deep depression, or times of high anxiety/paranoia, etc. But every now and then(maybe twice a year?), I get this very strange feeling. Almost like anxiety. It's like I'm standing on a cliffs edge but inside myself. I feel impulsive, reckless, out of control, but without being wired or high energy. I'm still low energy, insomniac, mostly tired. But there's a buzz low inside that feels dangerous. There's been times I've been around not-great people who have encouraged this, like pushing me off the cliff, and I've done some very stupid and dangerous things as a result. Mostly just very self destructive things like hard drugs or wandering dangerous places.

Does anyone else feel like this?",5.316216096042684,7.058706971098268,5.628901734104044,78.40861716318366,68.88439306358381,9.716140506891954,28.914628723877282,10.035473477838034,3.0043814139617613,738,27,132,19,13,235,110,173,0.253,0.619,0.129,-0.9811,1,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,1,10,15,5,0,9,0,9,4,0,2,1,33,21,15,0,1,10,0,7,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,9,8,0,1,7,0,0,1,3,9,0,1,6,7,7,6,14,14,4,25,0,3,0,0,3,12,0,7,15,74,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580380550466072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610928589964272,0.0,0.0,0.08784586640253977,0.12872637047542454,0.0,0.1118404534945707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875233350966032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14090865641680927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820795201730088,0.1275153609522272,0.0,0.1312602708778104,0.0,0.0,0.10994272508012756,0.128566692561033,0.0,0.0,0.1456949774502652,0.0,0.10495067079420242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011456553059587,0.0,0.0,0.10585164478255266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38114444380255535,0.08975259962603441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563831997131489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851138055197595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254294172815917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26547738729597403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904488763352196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3068909177940807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252431480052006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689630255187302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709845222759377,0.0,0.1312602708778104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685884187806866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048403903363295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13106314324880125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033107776093668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16693063381968154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21977371770271134,0.14439723023155066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.310982392070437,0.07410189510477057,0.09972202690104437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110621362310307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618077137156856
mentalhealth,peachs0da_,2020/01/08,I would rather kill myself than continue to work on getting my life together. That’s not quirky or cute. It’s just sad.,1.213750000000001,3.7751962083333375,2.2800000000000007,92.965,86.91666666666666,6.533333333333335,20.5,7.793537801064563,0.9713500000000002,95,3,20,2,3,30,23,24,0.364,0.636,0.0,-0.8828,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,2,1,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,3,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,13,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001195528057354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6355292809037139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4057417456637332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4181968790217252,0.0,0.0,0.4080634672939109,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pye_guy77,2020/01/08,Does anyone feel like days are merged together Ever since winter break ended and the night before I was watching toy story 4 and alladin and I was thinking. Their are only 12 hours in a day since I wake up at 12 against my will I never really get to do anything. I don’t go outside cause I do t have friends and I feel like I will never be happy when I wasn’t “self aware” when I mindlessly played bo2 with my brother and my grandma would walk in to cook dinner and we would eat and go to bed and now It’s just wake up go to school do homework eat a semifrozen Marie calendar pot pie and go to sleep and repeat and on days off i feel like it’s a waste,1.6284761904761886,3.1665985142857167,3.120000000000001,93.47333333333334,78.14285714285714,5.80952380952381,21.666666666666664,6.42735559955562,0.2160952380952379,512,14,116,4,12,168,85,140,0.044000000000000004,0.857,0.099,0.7353,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,1,0,5,6,0,0,4,0,15,7,3,1,3,24,24,13,0,2,1,1,3,3,1,4,0,0,2,1,2,13,4,0,4,3,0,5,4,0,0,0,3,4,16,6,14,16,0,27,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,0,17,69,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066831540594446,0.0,0.1255552438390506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298290730015806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673532918822286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951924520984713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13351836754266794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31224219131905,0.0,0.0,0.13513510756747316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801174433597546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23143770493857715,0.32699627672622217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787814557196798,0.0,0.07971351741942012,0.0,0.3468448445660857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16241765569633054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025446721006547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22361956733930305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23534865318678574,0.0,0.0,0.14318018315883724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160392562101701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977426882695436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441283920564525,0.0,0.0,0.15916775683736292,0.0,0.0,0.2524212612355243,0.0,0.15268399496242693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977631354951538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21676811126942688,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sumyungstrange,2020/01/08,"See you all again. I think i am very lost and i have been for so long; so long that i have created a labyrinth and i have long term affected people who love me, and im so sorry i did do thay. I am really trying to become better and stronger for you guys, and i was doijg worse before sll the trauma; and i need you to forget me pre self knowing trauma, because i am trying to learn you now through this unraveling of what i repressed and i have represssed some moments ive spent with people and ive also been nore fucked up from situtations from unresolved stuff, and youre so allowed to see me in that manner what i have been and get worried by my patterns, but please believe me when i tell you know that i am okay with now actually accepting who i am and learning my damaged ways and everything i damamged trying to make my life okay. 
I am so sorry you had to be collateral to me. Never did any of you deserve it. I just cant keep up. Not like you ever asked but i need to seperate so i dont get envious towards you, so i dont make you resent me and i don't resent you because i am very jealous of my friends. I think everyone surrounding me is so brilliant and beautiful, and i cant carry that self known confidence thats why i need to seperate and not have reliance because i was for so lomg capitalizing off of being so gone and disadvantaged because i was and all my situatuons made me more immature for a whole rather than mature me because they all started at an immature time and i couldnt understand very dark times because no one else did and never talked about it then. They do now though and that helps me now. And i really need to do this by myself to save me for everyone bevause i love everyone and i feel like i have been so horrible because i have been, and i need to seperate so i cant use you anymore.
Im bad, ive let the milk spoil, ive let it sll spoil, and its okay.
Im cleaning the fridge and planning on the weekly and monthly cleanings inside of me
Trust me im coming back, but im going to be away for a bit.",2.9385035211267616,4.0882296666666695,4.642720070422538,85.48760123239437,73.92957746478874,7.672417840375588,27.397007042253517,8.17850203761792,1.7033147887323952,1602,60,340,25,32,543,187,426,0.114,0.73,0.156,0.9751,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,13,2,3,25,23,5,1,8,3,47,5,0,6,6,71,77,46,0,7,7,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,2,3,17,30,1,2,10,0,1,3,12,11,0,1,16,3,75,12,41,55,8,34,0,2,2,3,27,9,1,2,23,251,92,2,0.0,0.0,0.07693397806006462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630462797073124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053612168962820304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818556543278693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370237280493144,0.0,0.07407037877020027,0.06062113215222925,0.06582597710768248,0.3364100413752177,0.08706976878771404,0.06708486268613294,0.08882280816342074,0.0,0.06972531723221799,0.08607007589516501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791148181127288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847938068147098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658585726742425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131298640436172,0.0,0.22599768387971556,0.07085401594622992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03986258315708476,0.05632148951924474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06090961775021831,0.0728839514911093,0.08237862670783087,0.0,0.04480513923646691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806146959490677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052843080431350636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4257898689917564,0.0,0.0,0.07007434728347513,0.0,0.0,0.08665400069550397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16123326658209602,0.05568522192796228,0.0770319909712209,0.0,0.0,0.2093059852331094,0.0,0.0,0.08606038884038897,0.0,0.14230775199234344,0.07459790072003003,0.1052492191565936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292729986343659,0.0,0.0,0.29228484848308184,0.1216086021211107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053422295962438686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931192154251376,0.0,0.0,0.08653984486950704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101057751611617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564647991694114,0.0,0.16448930681904034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650413990743213,0.055801552375643514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025001773295016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336655542305059,0.0689074055733588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103170836594294,0.07745739363958214,0.0,0.0919415013401517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057635910837229,0.0,0.0,0.08207256505412855,0.0,0.06809024360454195,0.0,0.1951474565488154,0.0,0.06257749765852849,0.06323864641206894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113853559583719,0.0880191966752848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006325660632473,0.08034209608967427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kittymare,2020/01/08,"Is it normal to be too emotional? I've(18F) never met someone this emotional except from my mother. So, I don't know is this is normal or not. 
I get depressed (for a couple of hours), crying on the couch and hyperventilating if I can't do one simple thing. This happens mainly with school projects and things I HAVE to do (duties) 

I remember that night I had to a simple drawing of a durian (I'm pretty good at drawing). After trying ONE single time and failing I started panicking. My bf was with me, so he tried to help. We went outside, sat at the pavement so I could relax a little. Then we got home and I finished the drawing.
Similar thing happens before some exams. There's been times when I just stayed at home and my mother had to call school lying I was ill. 
Plus, exactly the same if I get less than I thought. A couple of months ago I got a 7/10 and literally started crying in the middle of the class, and had a headache for two days. (I've always had excellent maks, always higher that 7) 

Also, I get annoyed easily. Without any reason. 
It's like if I felt a constant ""weight"", except specific moments when I'm relaxed. Mainly in my bed, or when I have everything done.
This is starting to seriously interfere with my life, and my relationship, but I can't help it.",2.788262608695653,4.9260120280000015,4.555530434782611,81.76159130434786,76.72,6.747826086956523,25.669565217391305,7.7425588080867325,1.616231304347826,997,37,184,15,23,337,142,250,0.066,0.833,0.102,0.7536,0,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,2,0,0,2,10,9,1,0,14,0,21,3,0,1,2,39,39,23,0,6,11,2,2,1,1,0,2,0,4,0,12,14,1,2,5,2,0,1,6,4,0,3,15,2,27,5,28,22,6,29,0,2,0,0,11,8,0,6,20,138,39,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994553375962716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972341922712944,0.1867127825908771,0.0,0.0,0.07629739825820217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547087134285256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456506702735444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12124444811841932,0.0,0.08957969458052427,0.2482863615350917,0.2464849505066648,0.07235739516097248,0.0,0.09663459349809868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11481586927219578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524116938486089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083488837378547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077261371632944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17585396221098434,0.0,0.0,0.09410501581609312,0.17946741819723402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19842980905781127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15040576163434047,0.0,0.22508427096563074,0.0,0.11049085213391596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06166020634528337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792476341981335,0.054813492976094405,0.11245026620073403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955409474896504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653277909808271,0.0,0.0,0.10528871946144913,0.21985729766920176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205436637866296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414407245789257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535658379022785,0.0,0.12045694350074765,0.12709664795275988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22709749002532376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506364423308107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382395646769836,0.11958643243805504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22361490501593267,0.0,0.0,0.08907140783265187,0.13084524427786848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523479794328031,0.0,0.10959957841618476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662498730776496,0.0,0.10400718532047247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815332427409144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rider419,2020/01/08,"I feel lost So, I'll start with my story I posted on r/concussions. 

About 4 years ago now I slipped and hit my head on concrete and seems like every since then my anxiety and depression have gotten worse ( along with the start of extremely vivid and multiple dreams each night and I can remember every dream I have) 

But also around that time my parents got divorced and it wasn't the prettiest divorce, dad left one night with suit cases telling me that he loves me and he probably wont be able to talk to me for a while. 

And here is some mental illness backstory. 

My grandpa has bipolar- diagnosed. My mom had frontal lobe psychomotor epilepsy as a child and I'm pretty sure she has some form of bipolar based on her actions and drug abuse. 

Also, I have the same symptoms as my mom had as a kid with her epilepsy where things will begin to look really far away and when i was a kid it only happened when i was sick or really tired, and stopped for a while but after hitting my head it came back starting when I got sick or tired and now it happens at least 15 times a month but only at night after a stressful event. Things begin to look really far away and also if it gets really bad my thoughts will start to sound really loud like I'm screaming them and if I'm typing on my phone it feels like I'm slamming my fingers down really hard. 

Also I have had moments in the past where I had really bad waking arousal which is where you wake up extremely confused and for me I get really confused and I keep thinking that the world is ending then next second it's okay then back to ending its hard to explain. But these dont happen often. 

On top of all that like I said before I have bad anxiety and depression. Especially if I have made plans with someone (especially if the plans were made far in advance) and then they cancel or try to change the plans I go from being really anxious and upset and trying to get them to reconsider to just upset and mad at myself for making the plans and trusting people to follow through to just generally depressed that I have to go alone or not at all. 

Like I said, I'm lost. I've been trying to figure out why I have anxiety and depression and why I have these episodes of wierd perception. I've gone to a psychologist and he helped me a little but not really because all my symptoms dont really impede me from functioning day to day like I hold a job I feed myself I bathe. But I'm just constantly worrying about what could be causing all this? Is it all connected ? Or is my anxiety and depression separate from my perception issues? Was all brought about by the fall ? Or was it just worsened by the fall? Do I have a brain tumor ? Am I going to developed bipolar or schizophrenia? 

Im so lost and I've tried to do so much research trying to figure something out. My insurance won't cover a brain scan of any kind. 

If any of you know anything that could help or have any advice please tell me. 


Sorry that this whole post was so jumbled, portion of it was typed out while having one of those perception episodes/seizure I had a stressful day today and I'm tired too so it was one of the worse episodes.",3.587236421725244,5.252078656549521,4.580020447284348,84.52560255591055,73.1373801916933,7.81950159744409,26.41776357827476,8.488131031819089,1.8213631693290733,2493,87,490,44,50,811,276,626,0.20600000000000002,0.731,0.063,-0.9985,2,1,2,0,3,0,38.0,0,2,3,9,30,30,1,6,24,1,49,23,8,4,7,102,99,70,0,7,25,5,5,6,0,4,13,5,1,3,28,41,1,3,13,3,0,11,7,19,0,4,29,14,59,11,72,59,15,84,0,8,4,2,31,29,0,19,48,333,87,4,0.05711246625110061,0.06766893340796094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05580964102573095,0.050626755362574515,0.0,0.0,0.059151290817524266,0.0,0.1826912745073577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165153065619997,0.0,0.17476352143359006,0.06452083044654403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04699869342715525,0.050842203509477685,0.0,0.0,0.1073180841406659,0.08783192240988963,0.14305957119107995,0.03481522932792447,0.0,0.048598502247783004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751280112570998,0.0,0.06532144645664531,0.0,0.0586702351927609,0.060417416450889085,0.0,0.0,0.061718286442091215,0.0,0.09119931403565733,0.0,0.0,0.11049844780653624,0.0,0.24595441747178176,0.05796795103689707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338707701896727,0.0,0.0662323288432905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116938644077493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096239432114047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05775555794832001,0.04080115730139661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951671915825546,0.0,0.09737499218340516,0.0,0.09135611316817684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15151309586709585,0.0,0.10232310345873424,0.0,0.11722773464108315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656256449798535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169126409960286,0.059610576481579976,0.05667531015610557,0.05076418416329028,0.0,0.059473844897427186,0.031387517831577415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062052861690641725,0.0,0.0,0.16741359688912014,0.05724169516684005,0.0,0.0,0.0959201750174812,0.0,0.18703501056890132,0.0,0.051546230611175116,0.1080823929769082,0.03812301470817818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05755593298568695,0.0,0.0,0.13377886041947926,0.045586625676917285,0.0,0.04198423413914973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060739755784848526,0.16078854201627138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610265564196973,0.08687320834051344,0.0,0.0,0.06341663496714943,0.0,0.05452031144693445,0.03959459296837359,0.0,0.0,0.06269233739197752,0.0,0.0,0.10939591064942457,0.05810391047961555,0.061576898300047374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.402464791616076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469729085258114,0.0,0.10865406805593963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199304428078158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04724402226685198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839120731759936,0.0439679667827438,0.0,0.06393273010162592,0.16169799027511825,0.0,0.0,0.04774857911287235,0.1308442742555093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05382782354338745,0.11872344081530703,0.0,0.04590483699086344,0.09983762567462183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588596962402656,0.036595362273392384,0.0,0.0453409186789872,0.06660547671460805,0.19692713511736054,0.05413594002064717,0.0,0.0,0.19387807811876048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307023503151408,0.06376402896560003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05800048178307736,0.11640496472873398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0367785557599494
mentalhealth,uglysudaca,2020/01/08,"I can't seem to have healthy crushes on people Hi guys. I suffer from OCD and this might be a problem that is OCD related but I'm not that sure anymore?
My problem is that I just cant seem to have a healthy relationship and instead end up being what I recognize as toxic, and basically a red flag. 
I cant have a crush without being obsessed with the person and then having my feelings switch to hate. 
The first relationship I was in, we dated for a year. I was in love, or at least i thought i was. I tried to break up with them like twice but we got back together. The third time I really broke up with them, simply because overnight I decided that I couldn't stand them at all. I tried to wait a week to see if the feelings would go away but I decided that I hated and resented them and I broke up with them. We didn't talk for about a year and now we are friends. I hated them for almost a year, for no real reason. 
Second time, I start talking to a person from my class, we flirt for months and my feelings kept switching between obsession about whether or not they liked me back, and then I didn't talk to them for a whole month when I convinced myself it was a mistake and freaked out. After that we started talking again, more than ever, and then we kissed. After kissing them, almost every positive feeling I had for them is just gone. I can barely stand them. I just cant bring myself to talk to them anymore. I feel like they personally did something to me and I hate them, except they've done nothing but just try to be with me.
I feel awful about this, I've been beating myself up for months but I still cant even remember what it felt like to like this person. I know I hurt their feelings and it makes me feel guilty. I feel like I am a bad person.
I dont know how to stop this cycle of obsession and loathing. I worry I might never be able to actually fall in love with a person because obsession is all I know. I cant seem to find a middle ground to liking someone. I tend to get obsessed when I make a new friend too, and it makes me feel gross and jealous and I have intrusive thoughts of me kissing and being in a relationship with that person, even though I dont want to.

TL;DR I get obsessed with people and then I freak and hate them. I sometimes get obsessed with friends too. I think I cant fall in love like a normal person and it makes me upset",3.4645228337236524,4.451918350409837,4.525173302107729,87.45308196721314,72.46311475409836,7.134519906323185,26.442857142857147,7.33818517376401,1.1907539110070258,1857,61,394,19,35,607,200,488,0.215,0.625,0.16,-0.9866,0,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,7,0,16,2,22,46,7,8,21,1,41,6,0,6,5,105,88,39,0,8,17,0,11,8,3,3,0,0,0,9,18,38,0,3,25,0,0,5,17,26,0,4,16,13,83,20,65,62,5,56,0,4,2,6,47,17,0,10,39,294,101,1,0.06264658921654552,0.0,0.061134034196210975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546301963861364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425716572426182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05885853276855652,0.09634272032869566,0.052307285246035805,0.07637755864357484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410921119973154,0.14684267198868128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554862835530504,0.0,0.0,0.08275496268694785,0.056667426531284634,0.05278245334017718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167599782727881,0.08950947170736105,0.06015054994497461,0.0,0.0572578476052664,0.0532871567845687,0.0,0.0,0.14520179828135835,0.0,0.09819077166908427,0.0,0.035603500342977865,0.0,0.05010420027130882,0.0,0.0,0.06202997260710614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30925268543956663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706446944388862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328678125070123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24484767271803684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696229779622264,0.0,0.1672683390431271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329162624007042,0.0,0.0,0.15001172948796782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04831691164352064,0.06050446624094595,0.0,0.0,0.061380356301889566,0.060111091941129936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686251404309553,0.4376046824983725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988865054711208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130553361223345,0.0401330092097156,0.06441112748930905,0.0,0.20177697596111765,0.07096637335963256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049921220724338584,0.17109330594420005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05308025174731303,0.04822840501432889,0.061959078604302005,0.0,0.08868315657539214,0.0,0.05002964707223154,0.05237535371360707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904366894466422,0.0,0.0,0.2517647770081797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04014140481155811,0.061549955831149326,0.09946878829203316,0.0730594599253859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275987655437512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03695058143707698,0.0,0.050251315085503435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994267962159448,0.0,0.0603890764560004,0.0,0.0,0.06362065228720812,0.0,0.044502339560980375,0.0,0.0,0.12102704851904185
mentalhealth,Josepabloka,2020/01/08,"Suicide note from a friend An old friend from high school recently uploaded a video to his YouTube channel that looks like a suicide note, I'm very afraid of what could happen to him. I've been sending his musical videos to friends so they see them and support his art in order to give him confidence and make him feel support and company. He would really appreciate if you have a look through his channel and feel free to comment something nice if you like his work, believe me this would help him very much to get through this situation. Link: https://youtu.be/GWUg_kD6gIs

Also I have already contacted his brother and told him the situation, as also pass him contact info of a psychologist. If you have any other suggestions of what I could do to help him please let me know, and sorry if I have grammatical errors, English is not my native language",9.122500000000002,8.651241506410258,8.202179487179487,70.98865384615388,60.21794871794872,11.38974358974359,40.01282051282049,10.686352973137794,4.308989743589743,689,32,118,14,8,214,98,156,0.07,0.708,0.221,0.9758,0,0,1,0,0,2,15.0,0,3,2,1,3,10,0,1,7,0,12,0,0,1,0,21,26,14,2,8,5,1,2,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,5,5,1,2,1,1,0,0,2,5,24,10,16,19,1,7,0,0,3,0,32,2,0,4,4,80,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15041893289094566,0.218010431720203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269390799347432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357209691202578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217661208824719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13784253414956985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159329651951885,0.0,0.07121514566944638,0.13075876323339006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205364460903496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18272835180357166,0.14401656544903255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491114539038564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938385507600545,0.0,0.13318611094791394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289282706317353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098644604037563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020184089032112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14303199833716865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962491861999902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732220090871347,0.0,0.13458740627699708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13795066625154104,0.108619586508445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3064311244754833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049363243648451,0.0,0.1525853068581592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981969932632316,0.30936071794989983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13024784560144895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249362502636421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923362666516296,0.0,0.0,0.19365815385261284,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OCDweirdo,2020/01/08,How do I quit an obsession? I have OCD. I’m on tons of meds for it but I still find myself obsessing over a compulsion to look for futuristic technology ideas. I literally can’t stop. I’ve been going on job interviews so hopefully I’ll be working again but even when I did work; I used part of my lunch break to fish on the Internet. I just like to think of new things and try to fit it into Star Wars. It’s odd and irrational but it’s my thing- but I want to quit. What should I do?,-0.641964285714284,1.5307527980769289,2.1706043956043963,92.73153846153849,93.1346153846154,6.817582417582417,18.005494505494504,7.957251820313856,0.7696532967032971,377,11,90,10,14,131,73,104,0.17300000000000001,0.7120000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.737,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,4,7,5,1,2,3,0,8,1,0,2,0,17,15,9,1,3,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,3,1,1,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,1,12,2,15,11,2,13,0,0,1,0,1,6,0,1,6,60,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469661589248978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20023008923612665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245050652259801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21759037175944532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473084015610692,0.0,0.0,0.21739759961360394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702871616737387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18396737261675794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433423402812637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115834803663583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372362935019757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4660253131108888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174953148200483,0.18315605958762352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29108667592950066,0.14037406929600507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487371791512876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18920999612331224,0.0,0.0,0.12921579360576915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189776347402603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Homo-sapian,2020/01/08,"I’m not okay There I admitted it. I’m not okay. What’s that supposed to do anyway? I wanna cut myself. I’m hearing fucking voices. I hallucinate daily of which I was reminded is not normal. Psychosis. It’s such a strong word. One that people either pity you over or see you as some monster. I have fought of an anxiety attack for nearly 1.5 hours yesterday and I have depression. I’m tired of feeling so empty and alone. Such anguish. Too much. The Them are splitting into individual voices. I can’t take it any more. I wanna take it. The knife. The one that felt heavy in my hand two years ago. The one that was supposedly destined for me to use for my end. 

So fine.... I’m not okay... I’m hurting, wounded, and don’t know how I’m still breathing.",-0.4347631176770257,1.6895556026490084,2.069701986754968,90.56800687722877,102.24503311258276,4.442282221090169,19.052725420275085,6.297961479604792,0.3053839021905249,580,20,117,8,26,197,96,151,0.2,0.7340000000000001,0.066,-0.9509,0,1,0,0,0,1,30.0,0,2,1,1,9,13,4,1,6,3,9,5,2,2,0,21,27,8,0,3,6,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,10,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,8,0,4,4,7,15,5,15,23,4,10,0,3,1,1,6,4,1,2,6,80,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17897619903417208,0.0,0.0,0.20911221986608972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13730201582425078,0.0,0.15445642611304616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296955705381301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17390009080971025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17882750053911828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208900571109523,0.0,0.1938600283514908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18665750061158845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275610988792728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988353086010374,0.0,0.21614299386561367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109614589831252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14842307376349365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19782358804357128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.410447239918012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399751910039114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089178359656628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16124123235299173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.303614184606252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320595758611388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972314049176964,0.0,0.0,0.17438070284661178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001990881580688
mentalhealth,Deletus-TheFetus,2020/01/08,"I’m feeling emotionless lately I just act happy when I’m around family and friends so I don’t make them feel sad but really I just can’t.
The only time I actually laugh is when I cut. Some days I’ll be fine, some days, just eh. Nothing.
I can barely sleep.

I’m worthless in my class. I noticed when school started last year I was laughing , angry sometimes, I was so full of it. Now it’s just, nothing.
I bet one my teachers noticed because he makes real good joke in class but I just can’t laugh. (Sorry it might not make sense)",0.09684415584415262,2.4028036454545467,2.1706493506493523,93.49454545454547,89.81818181818181,4.5974025974025965,20.584415584415584,6.1826913282559595,0.17707792207792172,411,14,88,4,14,137,71,110,0.106,0.654,0.24,0.9432,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,12,11,1,0,1,0,9,1,1,3,0,20,18,8,0,0,8,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,1,1,1,4,3,0,1,2,2,14,8,4,14,3,16,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,4,11,50,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.17164927127948434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565848676601059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722466180784336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22687693336249934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16581923799283926,0.0,0.17787675934005115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589693090579974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475333471781778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872447248550461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337884063754872,0.1984185212449267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3522361424660651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865980209080301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.337554204075364,0.4005178703567529,0.0,0.0,0.11919178499869497,0.13377694997692532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20020832983885176,0.11268357921531505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17801629673319275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17602318235624415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396579223682068,0.19690134162352335,0.12450020190123445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025664609014338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132713550727193
mentalhealth,shizuyora,2020/01/08,"Belittled & Dismissed Context: 17M, I've been diagnosed with severe social anxiety, depression, and more recently autism. (High functioning, mostly communication barriers) 

I've always dealt with suicidal ideation, tendencies, self harm and overthinking. Due to these factors I struggle a lot, but dont talk about it much. 

Whenever I tell my mom that I need immediate help by being admitted to a mental health ward she dismisses whatever I say. 

She shuts me down and simply talks about things that she struggles with instead; reminding me that things are shitty for everyone and not just me. 

When I express my needs, or whatever is on my mind she just tells me that she relates to my problems, if I get defensive or irritable she tells me that I'm being a bratty teen and that if I want to be treated like an adult then I need to talk to her ""respectfully"". 

Mind you its already taken so much time for me to get to the point of being able to physically talk to her rather than handing her a note or text. 

We fought pretty bad recently, I told her that I'm tired of having to parent my parent (Having to be HER emotional support). She then wailed on me, basically saying, ""Excuse me you little fucking bitch? Are you really going to use that tone with me right now? You cant even begin to comprehend or understand what it's like having to parent your parent. Grow a fucking pair and get off your ass."" She blocked the only exit to my room while yelling at the top of her lungs. 

I just don't know what to do, I'm tired of hyperventilating. I'm tired of always being suffocated by this cloud, tired of the stressors. 

Is that selfish?",5.651220527045767,6.811475333333334,6.492907998150718,74.71941747572819,67.51132686084142,9.898659269533058,30.89551548774849,10.07000556051586,3.170050577901063,1294,50,232,31,21,428,173,309,0.20199999999999999,0.7290000000000001,0.07,-0.9938,4,0,0,0,1,0,42.0,1,6,0,1,11,17,5,2,10,0,18,11,3,1,0,39,41,18,1,8,12,5,1,2,0,0,6,3,1,2,18,11,0,3,3,0,0,2,4,12,0,0,4,4,46,5,39,31,5,25,0,1,0,3,44,13,4,8,12,162,64,0,0.09010121394469793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942893009659144,0.0,0.14994285571949564,0.09762462766519063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06892718204982633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523075011360203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776040435439662,0.09145083553821468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559795170435968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013517383959354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059511002045685976,0.0,0.0,0.08609557112685544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16659424084050875,0.14122249648692034,0.0,0.051206596268062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577337710050136,0.0,0.0,0.060392944455053825,0.09519687943248924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049517270833694366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880378038905376,0.09030508681080192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660083004588047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908008316245692,0.0,0.1819530822305538,0.10552545280515788,0.0,0.0,0.13246951885580396,0.20042672541497125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06852603332114096,0.0,0.0,0.4001869413032277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517477046380996,0.0,0.0,0.09166532655287896,0.0,0.08621469331033854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057721144826414425,0.0,0.17792815775789364,0.0,0.0,0.07694594440410299,0.0,0.14330420345349526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399521648892174,0.10178872546659834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09184684090319199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18838670377182135,0.0,0.09855610403671576,0.10224578983675092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28967977118169463,0.23625729707828236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971848588071615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253874242592217,0.4142323640216654,0.0,0.08609557112685544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093798541306406,0.0,0.077818519782971,0.0,0.0,0.053144030426540124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,urkelgrue555,2020/01/08,"Is it normal to worry about your brain health if a relative has Alzheimer's? I'm a volunteer at a nursing home, and I usually read to the people there, talk with them, and serve drinks at the little parties they have there, and it's fulfilling and nice. This is also the nursing home where my grandpa resides. He has Alzheimers, and although he's outlived the 5 years the doctors said he'd have to live (it's been about 10 years since he was diagnosed IIRC,) he's not doing that good anymore. Conversations have been going in circles, with stuff like ""how're my cats,"" and ""what grade are you in?"" And I've noticed that I've gradually become more and more concerned that I might wind up with Alzheimer's at some point.

​

I've always been kind of forgetful (ADHD) and I think the stress I deal with at the house isn't helping (I'm much better at the nursing home) but I keep worrying that my ADHD will someday develop into something worse, and after seeing how my grandpa's progressed... I'm scared. He's not super awful yet, but he could definitely be better, and I've just been really concerned and afraid, and I wanted to know if it's normal to feel this way, and if there's anything I can do to handle these feelings more efficiently.",7.1050427350427325,6.571285917695472,7.044855967078192,77.84749287749288,64.30864197530865,9.61684077239633,33.918645140867355,8.841846274778883,2.743975245330801,990,37,187,13,13,316,136,243,0.10099999999999999,0.8079999999999999,0.091,-0.3526,0,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,2,4,10,10,0,3,11,1,22,5,1,1,0,40,34,22,0,7,8,2,2,1,0,2,3,1,3,0,13,19,1,1,4,2,0,1,3,3,0,0,6,4,16,7,23,23,5,19,0,0,1,0,18,12,0,5,6,119,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29246468758754635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730520945720364,0.10124517419666708,0.1318371907273454,0.14785111103358398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12067108251725815,0.0,0.0,0.10012996450928058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438290298192082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21522718324532725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13583199148914202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714933981957118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254438459604613,0.0,0.12349979237181415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12454176572453747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11919732881422128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230472922942492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06915195438023472,0.1020570588351993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12933716916907553,0.0,0.0,0.0815576594464788,0.0,0.36615644478042136,0.0,0.0,0.14039914716884613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815228228612707,0.0,0.1267080751519159,0.06687060463460395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05944533167665,0.12195251585856005,0.1074431930510761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908027617202594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944673921240202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23843563458321504,0.0,0.13853029379921072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08435564692511131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502427950154533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217101232980621,0.0,0.07794952730144035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574287692798008,0.0,0.12182009967498762,0.0,0.09696097138988087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065263367773332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367304987584292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938081659390214,0.0,0.13929127808635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977995208701631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796583390809461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13401024066178732,0.0,0.07176836258359252,0.09658169435594058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471381972123149,0.12399945761319525,0.0,0.0,0.14785111103358398,0.15671224940132272
mentalhealth,Abby_Jane03,2020/01/08,"Could I have ADHD if my parents don’t have it? (F-16)
Last year my guidance councillor suggested that I might have a mild case of adhd. She looked through my school records and saw that most of my past teachers post high school said I have trouble paying attention, am restless and fidgety, am disorganized, have trouble focusing and struggle to hand assignments in on time. She also asked me a few questions. She suggested that I go get tested for adhd and she told my parents as much but my mother absolutely flew of the handle at the poor woman, say that it was nonsense and there was no way I had adhd etc etc. So it was dropped and never spoken of again. But I’m still not sure, neither of them have it, as far as I know. But I’ve talked to some of my friends about (some who have adhd themselves) and one friend couldn’t believe that I hadn’t been diagnosed yet. I don’t know what to do. Any suggestions?",4.347241082939412,5.635499787709495,4.810167597765363,85.10057155135368,70.67597765363129,7.742329179200687,29.41168886978943,8.139509932561175,1.94296957455952,718,28,142,10,13,228,108,179,0.128,0.815,0.057,-0.8382,2,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,0,7,7,0,2,4,0,21,2,1,0,2,24,32,16,0,3,5,3,1,0,2,1,1,2,0,1,11,7,0,0,4,0,2,2,8,4,0,1,10,5,21,3,18,19,8,18,0,0,2,0,21,5,0,6,8,104,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6956910205027527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258466179408747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873049059379285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082333373395684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043798447091567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243635382820704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117508472281881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25823788470642683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17889386608031807,0.0,0.06048729067134225,0.0,0.06579719980470397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232189899937805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725304942247578,0.09437150252327826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972212492049314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281823121639347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510742790401651,0.0,0.08929227347675599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845165847862648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571073070188108,0.0,0.1105196646054259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087977153200357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12969370646702086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012786648555338,0.09206836613513143,0.0,0.23433953464318324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924575014495644,0.0,0.0,0.1210324303116704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911590279973958,0.0,0.0,0.0930549927788837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750892238159517,0.0,0.0,0.11062730016419828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189624643249457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074554850098717
mentalhealth,kittenandkettlebells,2020/01/08,"Why is self harming bad? Hear me out, if you are doing this safely (only using sterilized utensils, proper wound care, cutting in way that won't cause death), why is this a bad thing?

I understand that it's a coping mechanism ' but EVERYONE has those. How is this any different from someone who, for example, goes to the gym everyday?

I'm a 27F who self harmed from the ages of 13 - 24. I struggle constantly with not doing it again. Not because the urges are there as such, but because I know self harming allows me to think a lot clearer as it slows the thoughts in my head when I get stressed etc.

What's the big deal if I can do it safely?",4.042751736111111,5.0410720078125015,4.89104166666667,85.32756944444445,71.109375,8.188888888888886,29.065972222222207,8.515128840125781,2.031783680555556,499,19,102,8,9,162,89,128,0.175,0.755,0.07,-0.9261,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,0,5,11,1,2,9,0,11,2,1,4,0,19,20,8,1,2,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,14,2,0,2,4,1,0,0,3,8,0,0,1,1,9,3,12,18,2,11,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,3,6,68,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236366554009393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27592422461799304,0.20144821651340472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684653952048777,0.16973914103337426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17855747283632678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17034729976768567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263264011295412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18427774987865986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15788659338334646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863270842993704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957606286978832,0.0,0.1862288696266224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080737955792327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404746370572394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566664948661685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5171201374772056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14000083580150244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18927310115850468,0.1727367302867723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977303276650503,0.10587421948595163,0.0,0.13117603099680358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17201270584958206,0.0,0.14270770063845206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115375022628095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981929951853311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thw6669,2020/01/08,its been two days and i cant take it anymore ive been constantly thinking and questioning myself abt something that i did years ago and im crying now i feel like im on the urge of having a panic attack and i feel like it came out of nowhere. i dont know why i feel so terrible all of sudden,-0.12098901098901038,1.8185001538461518,2.554505494505495,93.28692307692309,85.92307692307692,5.560439560439562,20.05494505494506,6.868970318607317,0.3011098901098905,230,7,53,3,7,80,45,65,0.226,0.698,0.076,-0.8718,0,0,1,0,0,1,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,1,2,0,7,0,0,0,1,13,14,5,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,4,3,8,2,5,10,1,9,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,8,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17663545239219794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976162762492404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266914887757791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22790485313842035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21533352016133747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188820720580683,0.12850875113472585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23353584369763095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.302261492958726,0.2847083849811595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4304784798014271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951024555974864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947005834585184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23379328982274686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232212069921348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15340310963669354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14982167779854955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768028139120155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19465190691045134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980470467222764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831943877234442
mentalhealth,gma0507,2020/01/08,"Trying to figure out how to feel better I’ve been struggling with what I believe are anxiety and depression for the last few years. I could be having a great day, and then I’ll start crying about how worthless I feel. Some days I want to work and keep myself distracted, but other days I want to lay in bed and do nothing. I am fortunate to have a great family and many wonderful opportunities, which often make me feel guilty for my mental health since I know my life is great. I don’t know what to do. The idea of talking to someone professional scares me because I can’t picture myself opening up. I just want to stop being sad.",6.376251428571429,6.1087511280000015,6.855885714285716,77.71480000000003,65.72,9.702857142857145,30.65714285714286,9.23628265651192,2.4717542857142867,501,16,97,8,7,164,84,125,0.19399999999999998,0.612,0.195,0.4838,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,5,11,0,3,4,0,13,2,0,3,0,29,25,9,0,4,2,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,8,0,2,8,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,3,16,5,16,21,2,12,0,3,0,0,1,4,0,3,8,66,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159906041284282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092427514609226,0.0,0.0,0.17082635095901394,0.0,0.134097556230435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105802680468265,0.0,0.16654991895827506,0.2933514182181113,0.0,0.1305920193714951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293596066117667,0.0,0.2299942918263661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5014921885590465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611673586376496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116306160789338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347688199662268,0.0,0.0,0.1666552436349218,0.12359236825041255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709527722648753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012090273971474,0.15372116064620756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527995632823641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14548563549910476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180032019973494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542348973601836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284690380516342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073190069902015,0.0,0.0,0.12676298788544824,0.0,0.1585084935320656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12186821898094073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102941553128633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682921894531226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442785935714252,0.11038280180122652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763975609037327
mentalhealth,juulsuschrist,2020/01/08,"finding the balance between optimism and ignoring my problems i won’t go into depth, but i’m having a dilemma. i can’t seem to find the balance between looking at the brighter side to things and choosing to just deal with some things as they are, and using this as an excuse to not make any changes to myself. anyone else feel similar or have any advice?",9.45608695652174,7.113918376811597,8.942318840579713,71.91608695652175,60.88405797101449,10.93913043478261,43.28985507246377,8.841846274778883,4.073933333333333,284,14,50,3,3,91,53,69,0.08199999999999999,0.816,0.102,0.3291,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,5,0,0,2,0,19,12,7,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,2,5,0,12,11,1,5,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,3,0,38,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240204566356376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343210739485167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17187741206011406,0.2518633639495616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600364211672211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25342129917540496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053443198729608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242898941533288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4493352889535385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970058064929708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20642010610925626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640813674460604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23520881280421024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22377794276180665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32661303837572364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21230257801240307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,strictdescript,2020/01/08,"Everything Happens for a Reason : Mental Illness, Tough Times, etc. What's your Reason? :) If you're a believer in the ""everything happens for a reason"" philosophy or general thought that you wouldn't be where you are now without enduring some hardships or mental illness in your life, what's the reason? What great thing is happening/has happened in your life that wouldn't have otherwise?",5.9857843137254925,8.739630323529411,5.835882352941179,73.40813725490199,69.29411764705881,9.239215686274509,34.86274509803922,9.725611199111238,4.088021568627451,314,16,47,8,6,98,43,68,0.099,0.7909999999999999,0.11,0.4098,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,5,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,0,6,4,0,4,0,13,10,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,5,1,6,6,2,6,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,4,2,35,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796962079346915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787904656395526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28668758049298176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17584376197821175,0.0,0.0,0.4231226124255141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253120212107283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32146682220596723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6559495514719891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596136766265653,0.0,0.0,0.12662118644882248,0.09300279671551502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537474546680461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rat_shit,2020/01/08,"Rehab I’m willingly going to rehab but now I’m having second thoughts. Im here currently, but not checked in. There was a small intervention today & more family therapy this week. I’m scared to change, rearrange my life, and leave my partner and pets. I was gung-ho the past week & pink cloud and now I’m sad and angry...mostly scared. In the span of a day. Fuck. Any ESH?",0.18283492822966352,2.5851994605263187,2.3203349282296664,90.73279904306223,93.86842105263158,5.921531100478469,17.435406698564595,7.348242739294969,0.548489473684211,293,8,61,6,11,98,53,76,0.22699999999999998,0.773,0.0,-0.9578,1,0,0,1,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,2,4,0,4,4,0,0,0,9,11,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,1,1,4,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,4,0,1,3,1,3,0,5,7,1,13,0,1,1,1,1,4,1,0,8,30,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4632976606125132,0.0,0.1453892099013307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261687507314833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378813007144871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015486711591534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19765177061065975,0.0,0.0,0.12150569393352804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309373182779957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263800262337548,0.0,0.0,0.15101105916645968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040933137130708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4280959483711032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444953650207973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697308414864106,0.0,0.0,0.2026544437578993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3429899224355745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ymwanathema,2020/01/08,"vent/ help with diagnosis hey everyone, i’m a 13 year old male, and lately everything has seemed bland and mundane, and i can’t seem to find meaning to life. my family is just about as mentally unhealthy as one can be. my father (absent) suffers from  narcissism and bipolar, and my mother has depression, mild schizophrenia, and add. i’m fairly certain i suffer from something like this. for some reason, despite her struggles, my mother downplays my mental health, and doesn’t think i have anything. you could ask anyone i know, i’m loud, rambunctious, and sometimes dramatic. i believe i have histrionic personality disorder. attention is one of the most amazing feelings for me. i’m always yelling or singing in class and my jokes are directed towards an audience. my reactions are very dramatic sometimes. i often argue with people and when i do i’m a bit theatrical. i’ve read about people with hpd being overly sexual. i don’t think i’m like that, though i have a very flirty personality. i guess you could say i didn’t get much attention as a child. i was a very gifted child. private school, highschool reading level in elementary school, and i have an IQ in the 130s to 140s range, but lately i have been underperforming. i’ve always had trouble with organization, and homework, but now i’m starting to realize that i need to study to get good grades. i feel like i’m the second favorite son, behind my 10 year old brother, who is talented as well. i’m not living up to the expectations of my parents and my teachers. my grades have plummeted in the last 2 years. especially in these last few months, i have been very depressed, in part to this. i suspect i have bipolar or some form of depression. i’ll have loud, confident, almost narcissistic phases, and when something as small as a bad grade in a test, will send me down a depressed, tired, self doubting period. these usually last a week or so. i’m considered the funny kid in the group. i have supportive friends, but sometimes i feel like i’m just there. like no one would really care if i disappeared. i’m very clingy. i sometimes mistake relationships for more than what they really are. i have been diagnosed with adhd, i don’t take anything for it. i used to do therapy to help me with my anger problems, but those have improved and almost disappeared these last 4 years despite the minor slip up. the main point of all of this was to get some insight on what’s happening. i’m having trouble getting up in the morning because i don’t want to face the day ahead. this last month, i have just felt like something is missing. i’ll start tearing up randomly. and this is probably the worst i’ve ever been. i’m sorry if i’m coming off attention seeking, i just could use some help and some insight on what i’m going though. thank you for reading.",4.665425712498884,6.523400924953097,5.520636558563389,78.08549874921829,70.70731707317074,8.603394979004737,30.88935048691145,9.172331337620626,2.8778982757080316,2235,97,397,47,42,730,261,533,0.139,0.725,0.136,-0.7076,1,0,3,0,1,0,74.0,0,3,1,1,16,33,2,2,23,0,47,7,1,3,3,84,93,37,0,11,14,6,4,6,1,2,6,5,1,7,16,25,0,0,19,5,0,5,8,17,1,4,9,9,50,16,60,77,15,53,0,7,0,0,30,22,0,19,32,256,66,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320588751908621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386558231944086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11521657052749625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048410065464271436,0.0,0.11394746672458188,0.0,0.06472450144593903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780754931409031,0.04220444118836096,0.0,0.0,0.07800307855245907,0.0,0.0,0.07558566352365717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058873974915668,0.0,0.0,0.0596390134456497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16583329307052233,0.0,0.0,0.044650241976295406,0.0,0.23852478234585794,0.07027111489925551,0.0,0.0,0.07934823245872312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06262617221103227,0.0,0.06615611257530993,0.06222311009850547,0.0,0.06526771136204874,0.0,0.10502046499988517,0.09892165451644408,0.06647555624151408,0.0,0.06327867778821411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05349006405234506,0.0,0.14468775808826362,0.0,0.03934731256172207,0.05807024586808236,0.0,0.0,0.07626912408820159,0.0,0.06122345179805595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735925696786744,0.0,0.0,0.13921839578377768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038049229487882065,0.28217500271472823,0.15619807364037774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0489020650221545,0.20294559135279605,0.0,0.06113494459411091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541618946487512,0.0,0.0,0.13954329962074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052393446761646,0.0,0.05089500126149981,0.05133617922543599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529900191700373,0.0,0.1407443752761331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687623182444718,0.0749737416262069,0.0,0.09599636151013312,0.12090502376778706,0.0,0.0,0.06544856639695773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746460279892967,0.06624764644258764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20775839119465495,0.0,0.0887062250736593,0.07118414597891178,0.0,0.07433147175997706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05505770443299464,0.0,0.1401371326217841,0.0,0.1260561783973123,0.07222622537016968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15989928867988967,0.2738970279208081,0.07750186339922302,0.09800844993097206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237847324374544,0.0,0.0,0.07856599235313799,0.0,0.0,0.05205539784591477,0.0,0.0,0.06374142179663643,0.07917518295585857,0.0,0.0,0.0887247819215343,0.13604422750113562,0.0,0.0,0.07957436877379061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959199963075368,0.07625153725659667,0.28562675693393674,0.04083604317373783,0.0,0.055535387876458064,0.0,0.062249735825329174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049181890756961666,0.0,0.0,0.1783378623123003
mentalhealth,Newidea1,2020/01/08,"Fear of success I am grateful for the positive things in my life, and have had and accomplished a lot, but I find it difficult to compete with negativity, I am an extremely sensitive person, yet can be resilient.The right person, place are important in life but I am searching for these things. Life can be very hurtful and I find it hard to just be. I want to build on my strengths but sometimes I am shut down. It hurts. How can I fulfill my destiny while hurting at the same time? Thanks!",2.4574736842105267,4.975508484210528,3.3928947368421056,87.65776315789472,79.94736842105263,6.747368421052633,28.447368421052627,7.908726449838941,1.980663157894737,386,18,76,7,10,123,62,95,0.209,0.59,0.201,-0.6035,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,4,3,8,0,1,4,0,13,3,0,1,0,14,15,8,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,11,3,12,11,2,11,0,3,0,0,2,8,0,1,3,59,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202867434682867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295490666658991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16149731140053522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5789870097119514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38201564372180336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326935728131996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148306754389367,0.1883563777075892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15395989099801258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17830356343720444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659794957421769,0.0,0.0,0.2395427748581811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512391679263493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875157707533224,0.10633502772667104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idigyourhoe,2020/01/08,"I feel like im going nowhere I feel like im going nowhere...

At one point in my life i started losing joy in everyithing and my emotions became blank.
It irritated me when someone shows emotions near me, because i felt like it was too much, but then i realized that i havent felt emotions like that in a while and thats the reason why i never show them or understand them. 
Meanwhile my number of friends was decreasing drastically, even tho i’ve never had too many friends. It kept going down until it hit 0.
Now i feel like im trapped, i barely feel any joy in activities, only emotion i feel is anger, noone around me but my family, which i dont think really understands me. Im still pushing forward.
Im so into music i very often make something new when i feel some type of way. That makes me feel better, but after that i feel dissappointed, because i feel like i could’ve done it better and then feel even worse. Other thing that helps me is gym, makes me feel good about myself for another 2 hours and thats it. 
Its hard for me to do anything. I try socializing and making friends again but then realize that everyone is about social media and clout, noone to talk to. 

Maybe i didnt type everything in order but im realizing that i have serious issue with my emotions and joy in life and hope for advice.",4.089011651265571,5.303651404580155,5.2810245078344735,81.7608216151065,71.21374045801527,8.111209321012455,27.5299316994777,8.532816995589336,1.922164885496183,1036,36,204,17,19,344,138,262,0.073,0.7140000000000001,0.213,0.9911,0,1,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,2,3,16,19,1,0,2,0,12,2,0,5,2,47,39,23,0,1,6,0,14,6,3,0,2,0,0,0,19,11,0,1,20,3,0,5,5,3,0,1,8,14,35,16,24,30,2,37,0,1,0,0,9,13,0,4,25,127,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07088514073110347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04932961253753701,0.07606439928583095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059694148475635235,0.06457588123863993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884392870170139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831127520721847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05791719935106857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423349253916459,0.08501621055312884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4079880619047432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582382609671093,0.0,0.0,0.06931497329706662,0.06519417551973865,0.0,0.0683841521835349,0.0,0.403461826282916,0.2072900469628856,0.13929933989222498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813241666335824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367827310389642,0.060843017901303365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498149294108133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048621959032774456,0.0,0.0,0.07204847817342068,0.07143717936833356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4701331731086238,0.07571279845736402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247413879778366,0.21263595604053756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115358165941228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19368375879265887,0.07354406263360358,0.07287606929063363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0533251655223713,0.0,0.1118944698548961,0.07005947755760572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049154906650396735,0.05516985493725556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857364279033386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04647091087210448,0.07458308817776915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789056489896138,0.061462813195206516,0.055844751117792316,0.0,0.0,0.051344107334894994,0.0,0.05793044966819199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05830481562917561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481922794829956,0.046480632327650026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049249823505540864,0.0,0.0,0.15103316699944164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059853006046163726,0.0,0.057578788039793764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654559676528675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392434492448317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moseandbellows,2020/01/08,"What easy things can I do to relieve anxiety? I know all the obvious ones like get exercise, breathing exercises, eat healthily, etc. I am being treated for bipolar and my anxiety has been the hardest to manage lately. It’s tricky because my anxiety flare ups are often unprovoked or immediately after I wake up (although I definitely do have some triggers that I’ve identified for flare ups later in the day). I read that lavender oil can help soothe anxiety. Just wondering what other small and easy things I can implement to help get my anxiety under control?",6.909335219236213,8.520597415841591,7.795558698727017,64.87118811881189,64.94059405940594,11.315983026874115,39.18104667609618,11.20814326018867,5.228447241867044,453,25,68,14,7,152,71,101,0.092,0.71,0.198,0.9282,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,0,11,6,2,2,2,12,15,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,8,2,1,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,10,3,11,13,3,10,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,4,5,53,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.721949658361591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505761711777696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21169433402414747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172535166610515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19313395518643475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21050133037493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19722365944203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530245068499011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372969182329743,0.0,0.2129133527824689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922116073100634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278989602834176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18879676130444914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507884913057105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046866429914945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,altariasong,2020/01/08,"Nothing’s felt right ever since my near-suicide attempt last August and I don’t know if I can function as a human being anymore Everything even mildly stressful was suddenly impossible once I came out of the mental ward. Trying to study for the GRE for grad school sends me into a panic attack. Applying for jobs makes me so scared I’m convinced I’ll die at any moment. I’ve had cognitive behavioral therapy, sometimes three times a week. I’ve undergone a full treatment of TMS for my depression. My medications are managed and *should* be working. 

I don’t want to be jobless and lacking the right amount of education for my field. It feels like I’ve lost all confidence in myself and my abilities and I don’t know how to get that back. I don’t want to be a dependent. I want to be independent with a job or working on a full-time education for a masters and taking care of my bird and buying my own groceries and being a contributing member of society. I don’t want to live with my parents. But the idea of striking out alone fills me with so much fear that I get overwhelmed and collapse into tears. I don’t know what to do anymore. I look in the mirror every day and say “this is not my life.” I was supposed to be successful and making my family proud, not cowering on the couch at the thought of paying bills. Please help I don’t know how to get that piece of me back that’s been missing for months",4.3595357142857125,5.542224453571432,5.504999999999999,80.53,70.53571428571428,8.6,29.714285714285715,8.982922981607832,2.4443,1117,44,215,21,20,371,157,280,0.127,0.76,0.113,-0.8341,5,1,0,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,0,7,8,14,1,5,16,0,23,2,0,6,2,46,46,19,1,7,5,1,2,1,0,1,2,1,1,1,7,19,0,0,8,0,3,3,9,9,0,1,8,4,28,5,38,30,7,27,0,4,1,0,5,13,0,3,12,143,35,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12414723052708425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151443766070797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377539473867556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636730060494964,0.0,0.1843423832067428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370972054799725,0.12221354553901158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730502627599409,0.0,0.1032422432139986,0.0,0.12440419238278798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917176820340036,0.10842758457857883,0.10099406791743737,0.0,0.1077297445261938,0.0,0.11300100332033627,0.13488496960036628,0.060608927275566764,0.0856338147698992,0.11509220094909635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18787844890234867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034507965175433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531652639128985,0.0,0.0,0.23790124265756565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635055538470429,0.09770852310664507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466640390202157,0.058561512688083975,0.0,0.10584575332734404,0.0,0.10065903816730873,0.0,0.13085022182279452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600258127912723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207545284414076,0.12079887998756195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567759635749942,0.0,0.08811686646459317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501670191356475,0.0,0.0,0.12765564450974715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14063942146594188,0.13309937098086427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315792090910339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20473345314792885,0.0,0.09532394673579107,0.12000890753853173,0.12131294523914155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915615436834957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855264385563535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13730853591393888,0.0,0.0,0.13111627691691186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901259146685513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13707965126053975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516190442766063,0.06989606953433579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138259072860994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28280531086298505,0.0,0.09615098214509864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17453084997156149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,laserleo,2020/01/08,"Need to vent: feels like I'm spiralling down the drain but instead of water it's hotsauce I dunno if that title makes any sense but I feel like I'm trapped between complete apathy and malaise and also a rocket ship of anxiety just ready to fuckin explode.

Where to start man, idk the world is on fire!! I expressed this recently and was told meditation would be helpful. How am I supposed to live in the present when the feeling of impending doom keeps tapping, rapping, rapping, on my smartphone chamber door. Quoth the Raven, ""Fuck!""

I finally got health insurance and surprise surprise I'm poor so it sucks the saltiest of balls. I've made three, yes THREE, dr's appointments that I've had to cancel because ""they don't accept my insurance"" EVEN THOUGH I got their info from my fucking insurance company! America the beautiful! Amber fuckin waves!! 

Those appointments were just for a chronic illness I have that predisposes me to cancer if untreated. Beyond that I have struggled with depression and anxiety my whole goddamn life and now the insurance company is telling me closest therapist is in anOTHER STATE. HOW IS THAT A THING? HOW DID THIS HAPPEN? WHY IS THIS ALLOWED??

FUCK!

I spend my days yoyoing between procrastinating my actual job, planning my wedding, and then lying awake at night heart pounding thinking about how all of this is useless anyway since some fuckin Arab country is gonna nuke us tomorrow because our brave commander in chief already has an escape plan for Mars that he and all the other 1% can fuck off to when shit hits the fan. 

I feel like I can't talk to my fiance about this which I know is unhealthy and I'd love to get a fucking therapist to talk to so that I can open up to my fuckin betrothed but here I am stuck on Reddit because life is dumb and hard and what's the goddamn point? 

FUCK",4.37625850340136,6.690751723032073,4.694072886297377,81.7724407191448,72.5860058309038,7.722021379980563,31.841496598639456,8.548686976883017,2.756653333333333,1463,70,257,27,30,460,206,343,0.24600000000000002,0.644,0.11,-0.9962,2,1,0,0,0,0,35.0,2,0,2,2,21,25,13,1,16,1,24,21,2,7,2,42,54,27,0,4,7,0,6,3,0,2,7,0,1,1,19,13,1,1,8,3,2,0,2,17,0,2,9,6,29,8,36,41,4,28,1,3,0,11,14,16,13,4,14,165,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.10170058071818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500584995999788,0.08334215154386743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087100985241099,0.10928042029727657,0.15945116072931645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905888144799507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926935065760386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721122584015239,0.0,0.08976179246257902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06883422526609198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107806177830631,0.22335754638404826,0.0,0.11416442982442825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5780806123838632,0.054448985911086364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166703419167712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215858780110092,0.0,0.09335779848153836,0.0,0.0,0.11077760392556156,0.0,0.12349743087994265,0.0698543361765341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341911074982636,0.09263269613606737,0.0,0.0,0.05727483755880883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14722284094221805,0.15274521894996199,0.0,0.09202535945989757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405974696265372,0.0986124728616148,0.0695655351397773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727544987377896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978004236664508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851857867546332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290153476902716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069770658379768,0.08620922863280478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376520004136795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895004586388173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675310609729198,0.09109009230125148,0.0,0.0,0.24200751595761605,0.06923702292310879,0.06677792875694155,0.10239249435291124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995836355235497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535999993763924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940394681773652,0.11635435527895592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403263724005721,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lonelystonervibes,2020/01/08,"Having terribly painful migraines from a combination of stress and jaw issues, pain is starting to effect school and make me tired af any suggestions for headache relief Been getting extreme pounding headaches behind my eye and across the side of my head, whole side of head face feels swollen and tight espiecially temple and side of head",30.30793103448276,12.07455806896552,22.898965517241386,34.192586206896564,45.896551724137936,25.95862068965517,80.41379310344827,14.554592549557764,10.639841379310344,280,13,43,4,1,78,46,58,0.223,0.733,0.045,-0.9081,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,1,2,0,3,11,6,2,0,9,7,5,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,3,1,9,6,1,5,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,23,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518410584682076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794962420601603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154246779084503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6573232265724613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228335958817524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14250975170322858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4543480433307017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160686129676739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511130521904584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24455811245092446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24538140843989856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383598465400425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justanon011,2020/01/08,"struggling really bad right now **sorry i tried to keep it short but i get carried away

im really struggling right now. i just turned 18 last month, and i still feel like a kid, i have no freedom. i feel stuck, trapped, ...

i cant drive, i cant find a job, i dont have plans for after high school, i dont have many friends (and the ones i have, i never see in person), i am struggling so bad. 

i have really bad anxiety and depression, ive been diagnosed, but my dad hasnt let me do therapy. he allowed me to take meds but stopped me abruptly after i ran out and whenever my doctor would fill my prescription (it happened maybe 3 times), the cycle would repeat. so i gave up on asking. he doesnt believe in mental health he thinks im imagining it and that im only coming up with it because im “always on my phone” and im “googling and inventing shit”. my grandma is similar and my mom isnt in the picture anymore so i dont know what to do. 

i have disordered eating and body image issues, too, so ive been seriously struggling with my weight. i just cant seem to lose it. and it has such a negative impact on my self esteem, so much so that i cant build new relationships. my friends are dating people and im left out. i feel so alone. 

my dad is so abusive. i cant go a day without getting yelled at and it makes me feel really terrible. hes gonna start charging me a couple hundred bucks a month once i get a job but i dont know how ill save up to move out. ive been seriously thinking about running away to a homeless shelter since i dont have friends or family i can stay with. 

all of this is fucking with my head. i dont wanna kill myself because i have a tiny bit of hope left, might have to do with my constant daydreaming.

idk its late and im rambling and cant form a coherent sentence right now but basically, i dont really know what to do. im having a hard time, and the few friends i do have, i cant really talk to. but ive been seriously contemplating suicide because i am so unhappy. i cant become pretty overnight, so i lack confidence... cant make friends or date because im scared to meet people since im embarrassed by my appearance... i dont have a support system... i dont have much to live for. 

anyone relate? what would you do?",0.609810126582282,2.674842816455701,3.1434869198312256,89.41026835443041,83.915611814346,6.408033755274262,23.19308016877637,7.627320914984058,1.125731105485232,1741,65,381,31,50,604,216,474,0.255,0.6890000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.9985,4,2,0,0,0,2,63.0,0,1,0,2,20,27,3,6,16,0,62,10,3,4,2,64,94,34,2,6,11,3,6,1,5,5,4,1,0,3,14,24,2,2,12,0,1,8,25,18,0,1,7,8,61,9,41,81,7,54,0,2,1,1,22,22,2,6,23,241,75,4,0.0,0.05888066192777311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146921906128777,0.0,0.0,0.041350370648132004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03801667657742242,0.0,0.049284264935999335,0.03474802523427372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04645828482052276,0.0,0.09338051470276997,0.0,0.12448019826248935,0.12117488157448895,0.05488442181234661,0.0,0.055989450043035065,0.0,0.0,0.05425426547724437,0.055200141857121424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04280799714443876,0.0,0.0537028349013509,0.0,0.0,0.05498677130664637,0.0,0.03204927983528167,0.0,0.04280238560135076,0.050439561490822835,0.0,0.0,0.05695498151733853,0.05086512236009343,0.0,0.0,0.5241814262554385,0.0,0.0,0.050850575420340896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04684819282191596,0.0,0.10050950445762054,0.03550224642735087,0.0,0.0,0.04542049409536842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19197186345942654,0.045942393010616304,0.07789104116454956,0.0,0.028242915944921662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04394528343652603,0.0,0.04451712003373682,0.0,0.05100159160442945,0.0528236523484344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052505685985373,0.0,0.04935852665007827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5367932199324933,0.05186885656924877,0.0986295958541219,0.04417135922237342,0.05498035357062077,0.0,0.08193351364286335,0.04050820431981912,0.05605832746091365,0.0,0.10798791666569096,0.05081668836659958,0.0,0.024278554683068908,0.0,0.04388175428145048,0.0,0.0,0.055596194737713614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06634383690273096,0.05038311241936677,0.049925487663689136,0.0,0.055200141857121424,0.0,0.05008105287601748,0.052718732575919865,0.0,0.05820239404361152,0.07933243690212287,0.05281811157014892,0.07306335040749788,0.0,0.038327986324954266,0.04799591438689598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052923744684329886,0.03367474000000139,0.03779542364027417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890476102773371,0.04339191422839729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05055786366553471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910160284479425,0.0,0.0,0.05335402527647168,0.0,0.12731823623257266,0.0,0.0,0.04975354444220953,0.05029417512556756,0.0396006242982639,0.04524062533150965,0.05184291071845935,0.0,0.05101138799570058,0.08221673264545455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055629685258058684,0.035174504090341896,0.05296844958533635,0.03968663483656087,0.04154739557260125,0.0,0.20780876791402386,0.0,0.054358460921645334,0.056393501199816676,0.0,0.0,0.03736459061938239,0.03994310315803764,0.0,0.0,0.05683076915706496,0.0,0.0,0.06368532931215083,0.0,0.0,0.05795531803830117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03373976505317318,0.0540540853663816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06051534111996516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047904380016237896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590608986183797,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fukawabuns,2020/01/08,"How do I (23F) learn to stop disassociating? Hi everyone , I’m new to reddit, and wanted to ask for help. I haven’t really had an easy life (I’ve dealt with depression, inferiority complex issues, etc for most of it) and have found it easier to disconnect from reality to cope. When someone yells at me, I disassociate. When I got in trouble at work and was scolded, I disassociate. Even when I’m hanging out with friends, it feels like i’m outside my body looking in (if that makes any sort of sense). I guess this was something I started doing when I was young, but I feel like it’s gotten out of hand. It makes me sad I can’t genuinely enjoy life, and feel more like i’m watching a movie. How do I stop doing this and wake up? Any help would be appreciated.",2.729377530364374,4.53049403289474,4.962105263157898,80.31204453441299,75.77631578947368,7.8348178137651825,25.508097165991906,8.617729084823388,1.7533748987854247,591,21,123,12,13,206,94,152,0.08800000000000001,0.708,0.204,0.9628,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,0,2,0,13,5,3,4,0,28,30,13,0,3,2,0,4,3,1,1,2,1,0,0,8,9,0,2,6,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,7,7,14,5,20,21,3,17,0,3,2,0,5,7,0,4,12,74,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23091864071576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872564079102733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885923667194182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623518944371128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18935466065298034,0.1121410980757151,0.0,0.0,0.16223641938022604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575445191679312,0.363882362562787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861600023635986,0.13117512693014752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579221968560692,0.0,0.18703683030423293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276060181952979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772109652316532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23984770630111876,0.2488444739902097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257626585182806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22666501928778884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639789823460304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876833426619682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14385790347333227,0.13070844626458106,0.0,0.0,0.12017438273527953,0.0,0.0,0.2838949828189211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001433301967639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360517901795574,0.0,0.0,0.12061007734811745,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,satansoveries-,2020/01/08,"i feel like i’m dragging myself on for no reason i’m sixteen. everyone says that i have my whole life ahead of me. but i don’t really think i do.

i have zero talent, i can’t sing, can’t draw, dance, write, act, cook, bake, etc. 

i don’t have a job, and i don’t think anybody would be willing to hire a girl who physically can’t handle going anywhere when on her period because for some reason she was cursed with crippling, unbearable, insanely painful cramps that never seem to end, no matter how many ibuprofen and tylenol she takes.

i can’t drive because i’m scared of it due to being in the car with several different people who suck at driving and have scared me out of ever wanting to drive, which i know highly disappoints my parents.

i have an irrational fear of throwing up and anything related to it, which causes severe anxiety almost every fucking day, so even if they let me stay home for six days once a month, would they let me stay home because i’m having a panic attack? probably not.

and the few things good going on in my life right now are that i have a very very loving family, a roof over my head, and good food/water.

and yet i still want to kill myself. i’ve thought of it and how i would do it, though i still haven’t figured out a perfect way to do it, i still thought about it pretty thoroughly, but i know that i could never do that to the people around me that i know love and care about me. so i probably won’t end up doing it.

i just feel like i have nothing to live for. i don’t have a very good and probable future, i’m in constant pain, physically and mentally, and i’m lazy and unmotivated no matter what i try. i feel like i’m just dragging myself on for no reason. like if i die, i would be better off, but if i continue living, i’m just going to be trying to survive every day of my life, and never actually living the life i could live if i didn’t have this phobia and constant pain. 

i’m sorry. i needed to get this out. i’ve been told every bit of advice ever, and i don’t think anything else can help at this point. the only thing i can do is fill myself with stronger pain relievers and anxiety meds.",5.616659125188542,4.861584809954753,6.702907239819004,79.80814668174962,67.41628959276018,9.538612368024133,29.728883861236802,8.841846274778883,2.1549680241327307,1674,50,347,24,24,566,201,442,0.183,0.6759999999999999,0.141,-0.9695,3,0,0,0,0,1,50.0,0,0,2,4,20,27,4,4,14,0,47,17,1,6,6,74,82,30,2,13,11,1,3,4,0,6,11,1,3,1,23,24,2,0,16,3,0,11,20,13,0,2,6,4,53,14,47,62,5,58,0,1,0,3,15,20,2,7,28,239,76,2,0.0,0.0,0.06566633774253204,0.0,0.0,0.06575601502825068,0.0,0.0,0.06738224566814012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295490645136833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074956708212193,0.0599032825976649,0.0,0.07655326026946513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12305996065322362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951344706238072,0.0734643757644335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686076890764713,0.06912642325127122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14543539417975954,0.0,0.107452822739533,0.0,0.0,0.13019144113854847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983746452297604,0.07030480344593047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056213020378219423,0.0,0.11919975783630955,0.0,0.0750472852422382,0.04444509021137494,0.12173717695973975,0.17008678325355805,0.06429946218340188,0.0,0.0,0.06343599366942672,0.07572111597463813,0.10207309883960124,0.14421817431742834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136857972565217,0.0,0.0,0.06220947226840285,0.03515678547090749,0.0,0.1147291280091856,0.16932156830973466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690600095172883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045103758501240064,0.07109666698218671,0.1349967779125765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06677596339738931,0.0,0.07444755391753666,0.0,0.11094416966135606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13761927311812175,0.190118576087906,0.13149999164599602,0.0,0.23767684677896075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146556230868405,0.0,0.0,0.06822254195866875,0.0,0.0,0.07474516386812897,0.0,0.06781353050858925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053711057587999454,0.0,0.0,0.04989544557940342,0.15569697045395467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0645675574559626,0.0,0.0,0.07166275005568516,0.0,0.0511778600274229,0.2864095981533429,0.07895152421341152,0.07471872467372406,0.0,0.0,0.09330225396237417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361177306493715,0.0,0.0,0.06845916835294126,0.21765333241316692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043108356450532966,0.20755915625566912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574661713444919,0.0,0.0535125273581369,0.13474011867501814,0.0,0.0,0.06125922579425513,0.0,0.15203941894276307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753267980960741,0.0,0.14344656774051104,0.16121610875084966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050594479556595316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941033963522993,0.1293521234353048,0.06611309462539419,0.10684312155584684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429946218340188,0.0,0.09137238358188204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16656643936084853,0.07937998505521228,0.053412486913379666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512803110470989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19120646614388187,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ishadawn,2020/01/08,I hide from my loving roommates to the point I'm starving or ready to piss my pants My roommates are very nice good people I was lucky to find on craigslist but for some reason I'm still hiding from them months and months after moving in. I feel a somewhat constant tremor of anxiety but when I have to talk to them I go into straight panic mode and vibrate with the tension of it for hours and hold my bladder or just wait till the night time to eat. It's so bizarre and miserable.  I just want to feel safe to be myself  and at home but I feel like an intruder. It sucks everywhere I go feels that way so I know whatever this is I carry it inside me and nowhere is home,1.8751466519092441,3.851616071942448,2.841870503597125,93.73194798007748,78.92805755395683,5.715771997786387,22.92252351964581,6.67199483983844,0.4896603209739903,530,17,115,5,13,168,91,139,0.187,0.6779999999999999,0.135,-0.8792,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,2,0,6,11,2,3,5,0,6,4,2,1,0,29,19,15,0,1,7,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,6,8,1,3,7,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,1,4,18,6,21,17,2,20,0,1,0,1,4,6,2,5,11,75,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397844110475408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20338575457157249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19258355115261389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806540463511686,0.13445567988871726,0.0,0.0,0.1720185066872099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21392564401157502,0.15785976139734018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37757550966642905,0.0,0.18534675758979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343407709956112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091948817472929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16986487494287136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004513182773157,0.20003509119162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766202575694533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22082128518004515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047958120779735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17791719185574206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19350894991957995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15030298097796216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15127428916277358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974547351464717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529113412302584,0.11100982844918356,0.14939058013614998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,starrmanx,2020/01/08,"invasive thoughts,paranoia, derealization? okay so since I was a kid I would do this thing where I would stare at my hand until reality became like funky and nothing made sense. It created like this physical pain almost like a brain freeze. Well that was before I ever experienced derealization and although it seems like it is derealization it feels different. Recently I've started experiencing it along with feelings of paranoia and violent invasive thoughts, idk what's going on, help would be appreciated",6.8925581395348825,10.094071918604648,7.537383720930233,60.170261627907,68.18604651162791,10.811627906976746,36.33139534883721,10.686352973137794,5.108911627906976,419,22,60,14,8,138,63,86,0.132,0.615,0.254,0.9029,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,1,0,2,1,8,3,2,1,1,15,15,6,0,3,0,0,4,4,0,3,1,0,0,1,10,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,4,7,5,6,6,7,0,8,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,2,8,39,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20945606795968635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17799041170947216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23350571438267445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21854076756343385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18920852338523306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115278262140416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188775658185472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020393372463544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4087645182167789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979240998664979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20070667827091354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225743133828123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065326327697095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19042280995372232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17302967344990675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805338915035934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389649305187091,0.0,0.0,0.1660596193234902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18807121976004332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4457704789649877,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tsucapu,2020/01/08,"I wanna kill myself because I feel like I'm a good hearted person in a world of selfish people. It's not even that I don't belong. It's just so painful to give my all to the world while I can see that most people really just care about themselves. They are indifferent to evil, sometimes even cruel themselves. I feel like the good that I do means nothing next to the bad that is done by everybody. And there's so little people that believe me. Everybody has secret intentions and acts for their benefit but I'm being my straight forward self and nobody believes it's my true self. They accuse me of being secretly this and that. Even though I'm a completely transparent person honestly doing my best to make this world a better place. 

tl;dr i wanna kms bc nobody gives a shit about anything",3.521688311688312,5.7924642857142885,4.484415584415586,82.50376623376627,74.97402597402598,6.997402597402598,25.285714285714285,7.957251820313856,1.6741350649350657,636,22,113,10,14,206,93,154,0.13699999999999998,0.675,0.188,0.8629,2,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,3,2,11,17,4,0,8,0,10,3,2,2,2,20,21,9,1,2,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,4,11,4,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,7,0,0,1,3,17,10,14,18,3,11,0,0,1,0,11,8,1,1,5,79,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450978294976515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618564440426116,0.08482542945297014,0.0,0.0,0.31355205521312896,0.1460308568031271,0.12306814528046428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187417236595087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589764285280468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424002408164394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27572465161042675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071830347912326,0.1988196405469712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669734917564039,0.0,0.23342726052053905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648951325813243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539504571411409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596473465321313,0.13946630451314276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288467021727634,0.0,0.0,0.15157671749552282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14798914063696214,0.0,0.0,0.13351956462992448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14806694862721076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894102739570897,0.24300334930041495,0.1453836433861598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891439789884018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088568584706293,0.0,0.2903306103472937,0.0,0.1428369588648599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13762433742211214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671558842442247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cmo2003,2020/01/08,"I find anti psychotics make me feel very lazy I'm not sure if it's the anti psychotics or just me being lazy but I have a hard time finishing anything i start and i give up easy, it seems to be caused by the medication. Though people i talk to say I cant always blame the medication.",0.4397142857142846,2.6987904,2.6995238095238108,90.97500000000002,86.66666666666666,5.428571428571429,18.57142857142857,6.868970318607317,0.15214285714285716,224,6,49,3,7,76,45,60,0.174,0.7170000000000001,0.109,0.0593,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,4,2,0,2,1,12,10,5,0,1,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,8,1,4,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,3,3,29,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099531265372868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20764050509661794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592054455395446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758219803613838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306188456045139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24205141799992014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260320376581912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16842770410375318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5083781830134068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17492914554722164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006575466141721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297055766604481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178595668972546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23781164227733104,0.0,0.0,0.20280784090166853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479062758112287,0.0,0.14713169472102222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20819307627863956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cosmic_Crossing,2020/01/08,"Where can I find self worth? I (21F) really dislike myself to be honest due to a variety of different reasons. I tried finding things I like about myself, wearing and doing stuff I enjoy, thinking about possible solutions everyday and nothing works.

I’ve seriously tried to change it and nothing works. I don’t want to rely on others but I don’t seem to give a frick about myself, so how and why do others?

How can I find and gain self worth?",3.0588372093023253,5.308146686046513,4.655988372093024,80.82840116279074,76.32558139534882,7.555813953488372,25.86627906976745,8.472884824447931,2.062516279069768,349,13,63,7,8,117,53,86,0.037000000000000005,0.754,0.21,0.9098,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,7,4,0,0,2,0,7,1,1,3,0,15,11,9,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,6,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,11,3,10,10,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,45,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938533624205195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914564181092281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5024593645008557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17578933665195426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895263059845491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516651116473874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065859465455358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11739413400027955,0.18841070431764464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16682319517090424,0.38233777493741417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097764993686757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174263015795073,0.1174186921988079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24882836473817335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080851297729836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16535390620826682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668152095305561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chuke190,2020/01/08,"Is this an illness or syndrome of some sort? This is my first post on Reddit, and honestly it's just to see if what I feel is an illness or if I'm just weird. Also sorry for the poor english but it's not my first language.

Okay, so this is what I want to talk about:

Since I was little I have always felt like everything good belongs to me, like I deserve everything important and precious, I constantly fantasize about getting everything I want (be it money, new stuff that is released and even women) I'm always daydreaming about having everything I want and how I would get it, and lately it's becoming more of a problem.

Recently I met this girl, she's really cool and everything, but then it started to happen, I felt like she belonged to me, like she had to be mine (note: I DON'T like her, but I feel the need to make her mine), since then I have been fantasizing about her being my girlfriend and it's been really driving me crazy because we're really good friends and I don't want to ruin anything.

If this has nothing to do with mental health then I'm sorry, but I really didn't know where to ask this.",3.2665072247135,4.908516340807175,4.6398729446935745,83.86296836073744,73.93273542600897,8.004882909815647,26.738664673642248,8.680891452615391,1.995884105630294,876,32,173,17,18,291,116,223,0.07200000000000001,0.705,0.223,0.9893,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,11,15,0,0,5,2,21,3,0,2,0,37,42,23,0,10,12,0,4,5,2,1,3,0,0,2,17,9,0,0,5,0,2,1,4,3,0,2,8,6,30,12,19,30,2,15,0,1,1,0,13,3,0,7,15,124,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881977979315253,0.18483232557497176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913982041457091,0.0,0.10383211433184032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06770506168273119,0.12266414015652848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200233481490432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335832609443141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4990967050728881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231704311294503,0.0,0.2132823707172684,0.0,0.0,0.1889460884097056,0.0,0.0,0.0858096442958237,0.0,0.11605524573091044,0.0,0.0,0.18631449523914764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821567265674956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805841587257955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06103920243748865,0.0,0.12528776489833046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713072249011067,0.11131773585608733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413770100542226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192883310630744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823543466788612,0.0,0.10726864517994336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065712300829845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637093337221158,0.0,0.0,0.10627556869460718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846079830058559,0.0,0.1096646953462884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850556075486482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837505886627592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24865953886474304,0.07861338713608301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271444839978244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927098514066903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620394199384936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788984015334324,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BobbyBeatsAll,2020/01/08,"What to do for extended mental health break? Hi all, throwaway here. 

I (M19) have been experiencing symptoms of burnout, depression, and anxiety since my early teen years. Recently, I attended culinary school and subjected myself to a pretty strenuous workload (14+ hours in the kitchen several times a week) which lead to said burnout and alcohol use. I ended up dropping out to take a gap year and go to community college to focus on myself and finish up my AA there. 

Recently, my symptoms have seemed exacerbated. I've struggled with these feelings, but this is the first time I've come to grips and have tried to combat them and reintegrate myself into society as a more fun, social and comfortable person. I've been going to counseling for \~4 months now and have just finished my first month on 25mg Zoloft. These have been integral in helping me get into a better headspace, but even now I still continue to struggle. 

 I've quit kitchen work and have decided to take an extended time off (2 months plus) to focus on my mental health and really start putting myself in a better position. I'm continuing to attend college classes, but will be left with a pretty healthy amount of free time (\~5 days a week). I DO have a financial cushion with which to do so, so that I will be able to live comfortably without a job in this time.

This being said, how can I make the MOST of my time off? I'd like to start getting myself onto a structured schedule, hitting the gym more frequently, and exploring more hobbies in my time off. What can I do in this time off to combat anxiety/burnout/depression and start feeling better? I'd like to fill the time with something good. Thank you! Any and all help is appreciated.",7.067427631578944,7.505316137500002,7.20342105263158,73.41526315789477,64.1875,10.611842105263158,35.90460526315789,10.426177893888326,3.8456562499999993,1364,61,239,31,19,440,171,320,0.042,0.768,0.19,0.9952,1,0,2,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,1,10,10,14,0,2,17,0,23,8,0,4,2,40,43,22,0,0,5,0,3,2,0,2,6,2,2,1,11,23,3,0,5,1,1,9,1,3,1,2,5,6,23,12,49,32,7,67,0,1,0,0,9,20,0,2,38,158,34,9,0.09292182226177097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930516866717133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319002556306319,0.0,0.07108493969204276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24654540173623865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004392201807473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05992688812828536,0.0,0.16006685870876672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230115386586853,0.0,0.0,0.061373987237322125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396813064783002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807850909345494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709563384999137,0.0,0.10561922595119758,0.07793841586717705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975431036879176,0.0,0.0,0.12456707750823265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150927725214024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221057052241896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095983177299668,0.0,0.0,0.09079381738912276,0.0,0.08205167146384583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06202603790950715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18728668278804506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22250793601035024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113575103721092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18906979847667293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341209655260316,0.0,0.09883379594857984,0.0,0.0,0.05952809874013519,0.0,0.1834981786226673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17677986370826396,0.0,0.0,0.09404184498823984,0.0,0.0845925370875412,0.0,0.10497521001065313,0.0,0.07686589160255307,0.0,0.0,0.0947220958748668,0.0,0.07153575852660428,0.0,0.0,0.19731163218862785,0.0,0.0742074872902614,0.0,0.0,0.1942841282372777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19316270492054347,0.13973129215477298,0.0,0.0,0.08554992949809337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4876511563650483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308781776713428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802546197478048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907256172095507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957332073738708,0.0,0.0676481933001311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11967721394993312
mentalhealth,melonrinds,2020/01/08,I Can't Make Decisions I feel like my trauma and sense of self are ao fucked that I can't ever decide anything. Anyone else feels like this? Any advice,0.054193548387097217,2.3774402258064558,1.6731612903225823,94.10974193548388,98.35483870967742,3.7703225806451615,12.651612903225805,5.6839178017228535,-0.9090051612903224,121,2,24,1,5,39,26,31,0.21100000000000002,0.643,0.146,-0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,7,7,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,4,2,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,12,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874489088951948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20003830356953567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205682911485992,0.3014008028913273,0.24206790971665454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457322172957169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660837846851299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974714011728468,0.4202946993527651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719453865751389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874225962608061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19635351133344364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.306872138620511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon12345788,2020/01/08,"[19F] Is there something wrong with me? Whenever people around me are sad, I just get mad at them.  For example, we just lost our dog. And my brother is taking it very badly. I’m doing pretty fine. Pretty much like nothing happened, and when I hear that my brother is upset over it I just get mad at him. And I think about how I’ve been through so much worse in my life and that being torn up over a dog is stupid. But everyone around me thinks that I’m a monster for saying that/feeling that way. Can anybody suggest what I might be experiencing??",1.810545454545455,4.011527327272727,3.1136363636363638,90.55045454545456,80.27272727272728,5.454545454545455,22.72727272727273,6.574015621080383,0.5353636363636363,426,14,88,4,11,138,74,110,0.24,0.675,0.085,-0.9613,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,2,0,1,1,10,10,3,1,2,0,11,1,0,1,0,16,21,8,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,7,8,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,2,3,15,2,13,16,2,10,0,2,0,0,9,8,0,1,2,62,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34974237292067123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16401726139470912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18770462574301855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932479560232522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205261165025662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737091957053523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22139954714798246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13874974595272715,0.09596953022218828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21443493757902754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083893405215122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888086011131686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18848725628285026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13618515665834255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39969549162680973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562151311883757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512273266463313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14769669181284406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517386729118056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16208166237532454,0.0,0.1559230905770754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20018678270103515,0.0,0.21477377075504472,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ctesc,2020/01/08,"Obsessive-compulsive disorder with cleanliness Without thinking, I ate a pickle that was lying on the cutting board. The pickle had caught many crumbs. Since this cutting board is used a lot in my living group, I am now afraid that I will somehow get sick or something. I know that I always worry too much that I will somehow get sick by eating something that is not completely clean. My question is now is there a risk that I will get sick?",5.461606425702815,6.9965920481927775,5.301385542168674,81.69296184738957,68.27710843373494,7.9429718875502,30.700803212851405,8.344100000000001,2.348656224899598,352,14,62,5,6,109,53,83,0.299,0.701,0.0,-0.9735,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,2,2,5,0,10,5,0,1,0,11,18,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,7,1,2,0,3,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,4,0,9,0,5,11,2,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,5,2,46,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994264602397156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512917292709622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274685091789724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24524448265591034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3756564785359142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171756661175846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116349330922863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20376072356594135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429899806982232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17618663529052936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26848770223149443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982593107021976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3690227194495289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535722605970956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20699981825668787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310354366085487,0.0,0.0,0.2433987409826549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SansEPIIIIC,2020/01/08,"What is wrong with me 


For as long as I can remember I've always had a little anxiety I think, but starting around 14 years old it progressed extremely fast, and I started having panic attacks, but it was all manageable, and I was able to live with it, and have a normal life 


Recently, however, a lot has changed. 

My girlfriend broke up with me a month ago, which broke my world pretty much, things that I think were underlying before that also broke open, my anxiety got to unmanageable heights, and I have started feeling like all my relationships are surface level and meaningless 

I want to try to hang out with people, but I feel like I never know what to say and I fear that I'll say something dumb, and even moreso I feel like not trying is the best option and better than embarrassment 

I feel like I am completely trapped in my own life, and nothing I can do can get me out of it, I feel like I have nothing to look forward to and can only see me doing what I despise every day for the foreseeable future, I just don't know how to enjoy life anymore 

I have been trying to think of reasons to live, but I just can't find any, and suicide feels like an actual option, when a year ago thinking like this would of scared me",8.35854096520763,6.258273518518525,8.370310512532736,74.39791245791248,62.78600823045267,11.305499438832777,36.082678638234185,9.800150414767053,3.2844436213991766,967,34,189,15,11,316,136,243,0.205,0.642,0.153,-0.9498,1,1,1,0,0,2,20.0,0,0,0,3,7,21,3,4,8,0,24,3,0,2,3,51,44,20,1,3,7,0,6,7,1,1,3,2,0,0,13,19,0,0,15,0,0,2,4,11,0,0,6,10,30,10,28,37,6,30,0,3,2,0,4,13,1,3,24,132,43,1,0.0937433324429168,0.0,0.09147996982601032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619561612325173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496650908606739,0.07800196221429563,0.0,0.0,0.06374868065702682,0.0,0.14342678546409413,0.0,0.09296819619852237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345144061481588,0.0,0.1066465738806915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976867138623991,0.0,0.0983778438948344,0.08290835957465294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916801580230658,0.0,0.09828810052486224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604566942332828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191658696412191,0.0,0.07898280069993277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548731119605492,0.2843966733307286,0.40182153256813946,0.0,0.0,0.08567970754916596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04897702208806206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497510657099399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303776782137608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986410640724015,0.3205877995109101,0.09395544636487804,0.1655541600091236,0.0829598992813437,0.07872078939047061,0.0,0.0,0.07969722894967614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482503359237637,0.0,0.06891213559161831,0.0,0.07230063707310883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09184856219998376,0.1798985115012717,0.0,0.09836785807298656,0.0,0.0,0.07129602855918156,0.0,0.1099876024924474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498982332959037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537067043080304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638375868128944,0.09256023150748843,0.10064525658088444,0.10619292148730693,0.0,0.0,0.14909692108092748,0.0938534294319276,0.0,0.07470129896683866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216819719940645,0.0,0.0,0.199056039592142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253999053401447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062278904634775076,0.24026776895823415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909367077643632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05529224628082605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659257373984442,0.102493617951463,0.0,0.12073526519471035
mentalhealth,shutterlove18,2020/01/08,"Straight A’s This was my first semester after a 2 year gap and a degree change after lots of trauma. And the first time ever in my life I have gotten all A’s. I’m finally in a place where I can say I’m proud of myself, but I don’t have anyone in my life I can really tell. Thank you ❤️",-1.7065298507462678,0.06111885074626855,1.941921641791048,96.05676305970152,91.83582089552236,5.141044776119403,12.852611940298507,6.6274283507984215,-0.7606701492537318,221,3,56,3,8,81,45,67,0.033,0.8440000000000001,0.12300000000000001,0.6448,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,3,2,3,0,0,6,0,6,2,0,0,2,6,10,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,2,1,9,2,7,8,2,14,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,8,38,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18863940641373236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853959432306299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24403528147617026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955354370190625,0.0,0.4589566564420528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3811131602370288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22936090477300086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28186709970658325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17283068595980328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21454324804431726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23580330824371046,0.24838107233214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15731335406192784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737321988983627
mentalhealth,Burritolegs77,2020/01/08,"Can anyone else relate? Now for a while now (since 2018 of December) I've  been having this weird feeling. Like I'd go about my day feeling happy and then something mildly bad happens and then I go home sad with a cloud over my head? Or I'll wake up with that could over my head and then as I go to school I'll get happy? Also before I go to bed for some reason my mind likes to remind me of all the ""embarrasing"" things I've done and I constantly get reminded by myself that people don't like me, especially my friends. Now this makes no sense because I have an amazing group of friends who are genuine and kind yet for some reason my mind says that I don't belong in that group? Then today, I was at school and I felt that dark cloud again (sort of feels like a headache mixed with sadness) when I remembered that I was going to see one of my friends and I automatically felt happy but the dark cloud was still there. Like I was happy and sad in a way? Whenever I get this dark cloud and I'm at school I feel like I have to try extra hard to act normal  which just tires me out when I get home. I do tend to over think alot on certain things and people around me just say that I'm senstive or moody. It's just weird to me how in the same day my mood can go from feeling very happy to feeling like I dont deserve to be with my friends or vice versa. My mood goes up and down on a regular basis and its really annoying and I dont know why.",1.5910989678202796,3.267969163934428,3.0916211293260467,93.01712811171828,78.672131147541,5.961141469338193,20.47662416514876,6.775458762138228,0.14692106860959342,1125,28,257,11,27,369,150,305,0.098,0.747,0.156,0.9539,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,16,29,1,0,10,0,19,4,3,4,2,52,45,27,0,2,7,0,9,7,4,0,1,2,3,0,16,19,0,0,13,0,0,7,5,8,0,1,8,12,35,19,41,35,6,40,0,3,1,0,9,15,0,7,24,164,51,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06565168888145502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057403036242163176,0.08411647368656701,0.0,0.07308234147148436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854625823211125,0.05004461456272456,0.0,0.06985716768969491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871599917881158,0.0,0.06554652385470061,0.0,0.0,0.10588952664310196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401213187195175,0.1924304743839136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858020082166051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490595086266308,0.23459597771182816,0.15764898177904235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537069145389641,0.0,0.17156590353028411,0.0,0.2799403620735731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259672113081342,0.4369605800700575,0.07354138364596287,0.0,0.1685071995624882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646968278386406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548976128868267,0.04511750352602312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807537756428915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479933965305276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657859710539971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043609477452633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05562999070113645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138292742642318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05259243717163378,0.16881555818224106,0.0,0.0,0.09299812313380297,0.0,0.0,0.13057116831664106,0.0,0.2492548861155159,0.0654194319383469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791019132655915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320107588618508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06556151961135223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908111690957616,0.052603439216362416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435662461643199,0.07781687223157448,0.0,0.0,0.05573741077634082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677373307504039,0.0,0.06516353425341276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407836002539776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AStickFigures,2020/01/08,"How can I help A guy I went to college with has gone really far down the road of delusion. He has begun posting screeds on facebook about how he’s enlightened, and the cameras everywhere are watching him. Every job he has he’s being filmed and then called gay and gets fired. He’s living in a shelter/ his car at the moment and is refusing help. I’m pretty sure mutual friends from the time have dropped him. I haven’t seen him in over 15 years ,but I was going to be in the area where he is currently in a few months. I offered to buy him a beer, but I’m not really in a position to offer much outside of that and (as crass as it sounds) maybe a bar of soap (he said he’s having issues with cleanliness). I don’t know if there’s any kind of advice I can get from here on how to help during the conversation I hope to have with him... shit or if I should just bail... I feel like that would be a bad call though.",2.2814680483592404,3.469275316062177,3.795875647668392,90.76497063903284,75.63212435233159,7.219205526770295,22.71122625215889,7.793537801064563,0.8109698791018998,708,19,162,10,15,235,118,193,0.073,0.81,0.11699999999999999,0.6652,2,0,1,1,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,9,7,1,0,13,0,19,4,1,3,1,26,31,17,0,5,7,0,2,1,1,2,0,2,0,1,3,8,2,1,3,3,1,4,3,2,0,0,5,6,16,5,28,21,2,27,0,0,2,1,26,14,1,4,8,101,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17281540911920734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026381106732878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14766205186905726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.361166485107831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14900343855035025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942048535256894,0.12634140915414785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366335834384068,0.0,0.18479326223953246,0.0,0.10050771875535687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751089353894709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35561573225766185,0.0,0.0,0.17565158372455064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18458506403484112,0.17549596685400062,0.0,0.0,0.18416167258811986,0.09719193020431052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639979493021185,0.0,0.15616146103372666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776692209335549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14115968535057324,0.0,0.13000482472138827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16937305730144636,0.17991964965929555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265887996179461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682244938190541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18153360113349595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666786808995636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737538610105205,0.0,0.10312243992671402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639413763847613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562890124461012,0.0,0.0,0.11388536180583668
mentalhealth,Car11King,2020/01/08,"My gf isn't eating much I need help you guys ,
I'm with this girl and have been for the last couple of months and I'm worried about her .
I have ADD , and I was in therapy for depression through most of my teens so I believe I can recognise some signs of mental illness . As you've seen from the title of this thread , my girlfriend barely eats to the point of me having to beg her to eat a full meal sometimes . What can I do to help her ? (As far as I know she has no diagnosis) thanks in advance",0.9554285714285732,2.7728177333333366,2.55261904761905,95.4632142857143,81.19047619047619,5.342857142857143,20.97619047619048,6.2581,0.020504761904761803,382,11,89,3,10,125,72,105,0.10300000000000001,0.818,0.079,-0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,0,10,5,0,0,0,10,16,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,3,5,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,1,16,1,20,13,4,8,0,1,1,0,11,5,0,2,2,62,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22900541720326345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249043077590549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17506830598261294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6239599012069486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012602368886085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27248297888133355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170686894460333,0.16568475352561884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20483916879047415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224090249643572,0.0,0.14942014102189494,0.15071537379433153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19214723997093167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20103021673546875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18713531776634906,0.23244654110359475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064212994487836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Secretskillyou,2020/01/08,"How did you find out you were paranoid schizophrenic ? I’m 27, F. I’ve always had anxiety and lately it’s manifested itself into extreme paranoia. My grandfather was a paranoid schizophrenic. And a cousin on my other side was as well. I’m just scared and curious if I am as well...  but I don’t think extreme paranoia and anxiety is necessarily enough to say for sure. How did you know ?? What medications helped ? What should I look out for ? I feel I’m losing grasp with reality and I’m worried",2.2735502392344458,4.9735292736842105,4.298181818181817,79.6290909090909,82.57894736842105,7.665071770334929,26.5311004784689,8.575989854853784,2.4484736842105272,391,17,72,10,11,133,63,95,0.20199999999999999,0.735,0.064,-0.885,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,3,0,1,5,5,0,1,2,0,10,3,0,2,1,21,18,11,0,2,3,1,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,9,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,6,3,9,3,10,11,1,6,0,1,1,0,6,5,0,1,1,49,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19955666871940775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669365577460077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247807130086408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12126458342343367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21919906281833335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16075210455045094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131803566955327,0.0,0.2705371900357317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20139568343891398,0.2683069399726117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416021574076529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907213872741356,0.24011034073569704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22603568662325926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367253019297175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312695596854722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243557659613534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ladysushioftarth,2020/01/08,"Expirience with Lamictal? Hello all, 

I finally went to my med management appointment and was diagnosed with Bipolar 2 disorder and prescribed Lamictal. I'm having anxieties about taking the medication and was just wondering if anyone had taken it, and how their expiriences with it were. I've read all the side effects to look for and maybe that's what I'm worrying about most, I'm not sure, but I had never heard of this particular drug before.",9.744629629629628,9.015948370370367,9.934660493827165,59.90347222222224,59.12345679012346,15.01358024691358,41.23765432098766,13.816669648895859,6.2762320987654325,362,17,57,14,4,121,60,81,0.086,0.914,0.0,-0.5366,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,4,1,0,0,2,0,6,4,0,2,4,20,15,8,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,8,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,8,2,4,1,9,7,3,4,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,3,2,40,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18683140094006925,0.0,0.0,0.17076774770669356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20781742514824966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478831603531015,0.0,0.0,0.27990292538405737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28322337942858483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675364702779557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20508742934368684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453567655717373,0.0,0.2712788377030667,0.24603092052692066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18836131995177527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442910180711756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301791037321817,0.0,0.1836267511904823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22639895442659105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648515157594766,0.0,0.24802226867119054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,some_girl_somewhere,2020/01/08,"Boomers are lonely So, as a millennial, it’s easy to blame my current mental health issues on how I was raised. The hyper-focus on grades and extracurriculars and so forth. The structured approach to life and telling us to follow these steps for success.

After living at home for a couple of years and being surrounded by people of my parent’s generation, I have realized that boomers are lost too.
And lonelier than they care to admit. As much as I tried to put on a happy face and make my parents proud, they were probably doing the same. This makes me sad.

Maybe they kept us busy with all those activities and pushed achievement because they wanted us to really be connected and feel like we belong. To be happy and feel fulfilled in a way that they weren’t. 

I have been to a lot of 12-step meetings mainly for my mental health, and man, it’s not fun. How many of our parents are drinking, or took up smoking again, use prescription meds, or are basically just following the news day-to-day, living in fear of what is to come?

They put on a strong face for us. They are proud. They see us working hard and like our posts on social media. We FaceTime them and they are excited. Everything is fine, right?

I don’t mean to make anyone feel guilty or more depressed, but when thinking about politics and policy choices, it’s important to remember our parents. I’m not a fan of taxes and would not label myself a liberal, but I worry about all the folks entering retirement and those who have to keep working long after 65. 

We say that the boomers are out of touch and that their version of the American dream is gone, but for the most part, they put in the effort. I think they deserve a healthy and happy end to life. And once again, for people in their 60s, 70s and 80s without a lot of savings or friends or much to look forward to, we owe them some compassion and attention.

Thanks for reading :)",6.221618929016187,6.5796243287671246,6.333605230386054,79.20399439601496,65.986301369863,9.376089663760897,31.659402241594023,9.218907990703514,2.643356164383561,1500,55,283,25,22,478,201,365,0.063,0.789,0.147,0.9854,7,2,1,0,0,0,46.0,12,0,15,9,12,21,0,1,19,0,23,7,2,6,2,69,49,36,0,2,13,4,5,2,1,1,4,1,1,1,13,27,1,2,10,3,2,13,6,5,0,0,8,8,40,16,54,37,13,38,0,4,2,0,39,15,0,9,12,201,53,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05768200810311697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05028782537820098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410854683112849,0.0,0.0,0.07106162786275919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912784932867426,0.0,0.10640413702326587,0.0,0.07105231265501168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808131138053968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306555977318796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741406545618508,0.0,0.0,0.0928291437124401,0.12513495396091498,0.05893402149603081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06373497491716412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634504936012137,0.07389878593678043,0.0,0.0,0.17537539599765475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274861731937656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610272914087097,0.0,0.07332482014193774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653647991651278,0.08060520150534653,0.0,0.1456881471091472,0.0730049550551576,0.06927452589916826,0.0,0.0900523911773182,0.14026759115895282,0.0,0.0,0.1651969735840091,0.08363638161421726,0.08287672075040656,0.08986059428136328,0.09163269015803208,0.0,0.16626992056847742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128576348820115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878538521008593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36640110972852175,0.08933340474814311,0.0,0.11438247086412155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900683921985675,0.0,0.08894292437017899,0.0,0.0,0.2487889951820059,0.0,0.0,0.0825167320711106,0.0,0.05284803009894814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345008284141147,0.07044977361570166,0.0,0.06560286425530475,0.0,0.0,0.06573736251946442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409266010129328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210374860395734,0.07594976733281543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057181712245852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165432255397878,0.056008287897603634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4961530772524788,0.07124868171124785,0.0,0.0,0.04865733914334894,0.06548022120251963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952166540807981,0.0,0.12011382292827688,0.08377707560925042,0.0,0.058601660501025936,0.0,0.0,0.05312369401040574
mentalhealth,Tydolson,2020/01/08,"Does St. John’s Wort work? My parents will not let me get on antidepressants, so I bought the St. John’s Wort over-the-counter supplements. I’ve never tried anything like this before, and the reviews/side effects for this stuff looks really mixed and somewhat scary (as many people said it worsened their symptoms heavily). Has anyone used this? Does it work? Is it safe? Is there anything I need to keep an eye on?",3.3719230769230784,6.0408958717948735,3.1894230769230774,89.56182692307692,77.46153846153847,5.951282051282053,25.134615384615394,7.1686216300943375,1.1436615384615385,330,12,62,4,8,99,60,78,0.114,0.8490000000000001,0.037000000000000005,-0.7164,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,3,2,2,0,0,3,0,5,2,1,2,1,10,12,4,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,7,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,5,2,5,8,1,3,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,1,2,32,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274116979453134,0.0,0.3595217068128376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858798107201768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38232374787419104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412800836666945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19416312246674336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233738571866444,0.0,0.10672073645079334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18343799861969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22146799643833945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16197350680018993,0.16847753009480276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24255628381514635,0.0,0.0,0.15144161046320045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994086204869402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20779032964062807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500661929082409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270470249708581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148309181545408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188665536252476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.318059762929211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Xx_k4ng4r00_xX,2020/01/08,"Possiblity of depression? I felt like it was necessary to make clear that I am dead serious. I'm not going to pretend that I think I have depression, and this is not the point of this post. That being said, I've noticed alot of alarming symptoms as of late which I suspect are brought on by some form of depression. This mostly started around September. 

So I've always had pretty bad self image but it was mostly that I cared too much about what I thought of myself whereas now I'm so insecure that it makes it difficult to function. I have a vastly different personality for each group of people that I'm around regularly and while I used to be self conscious about 3 or 4 things about myself the number of insecurities has increased quite a bit. I worry about nearly EVERYTHING I do and how others will perceive it despite the knowledge that no one really pays attention to me (which isnt really that comforting of a thought anyway). Also I've had alot of social anxiety and I'm always critical on myself whenever I screw up in a social situation which leads to more negative thoughts. 

Another thing is that I've literally been compiling past obsessions and interests once again to see if I can find something to use as an escape or just a source of dopamine or some shit. I always came up empty handed though because I cant seem to enjoy the things I used to love anymore. I cant play video games for more than an hour without getting bored and same goes for my favorite tv shows. This isnt changing interests either because theres nothing at all I can find interest in, even new things. 

Also I go through random phases alot especially at night where I'll just either get really angry or depressed and I'll feel like crying about random shit. Theres alot of other symptoms I've noticed otherwise such as lack of motivation. I have doubts as well because alot of common symptoms dont apply to me at all. I can still get a roughly full night of sleep, my appetite is still mostly the same and I really would never seriously consider suicide.

I really just need to gather thoughts before I decide to go in for a medical opinion. Is this temporary? Am I overreacting?",6.048534582775545,6.983782949397592,6.981311914323964,72.3863632307006,66.49397590361447,10.09995537706381,33.201695671575195,10.168813456921066,3.547600624721107,1744,74,301,41,27,583,221,415,0.19699999999999998,0.6859999999999999,0.11699999999999999,-0.9898,1,0,1,0,0,1,26.0,0,0,0,3,28,28,3,5,19,0,29,10,4,8,4,73,60,25,2,4,14,0,4,2,0,2,4,1,0,3,29,12,0,0,17,6,1,7,11,17,1,1,13,6,32,11,58,43,25,39,0,4,1,2,10,17,3,20,16,227,61,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060295049741316,0.203836750583096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562501122201899,0.06246776590752155,0.0,0.08098230045639139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538497924508806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681806037529077,0.14933296682282046,0.0,0.06948452026985014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891488436243213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09339442905526488,0.08325526598791975,0.0,0.08638281024854609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896969321573892,0.0,0.0,0.2813259490038185,0.0,0.0,0.08531471020099847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570198477885296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05393401027224084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338849794252886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041288486798372666,0.05833613610328017,0.07840400800820778,0.0,0.14926695587264896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798802430430933,0.0,0.13922352140909802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08041619131306763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211321957257136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797874620852899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369908412969572,0.0,0.1090140340018007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226134296567042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060027659971536765,0.06054800342668329,0.0629792999547954,0.07886532475641632,0.0,0.1532600689341741,0.0,0.07835257596557048,0.18593521564133486,0.0,0.08696257515191537,0.055333237008045835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795132587704134,0.05661103059637865,0.07130018150793753,0.0,0.0,0.07719273390161127,0.09205656480565824,0.07820531517826168,0.08307503644646952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685280533140477,0.0,0.0,0.2615594353127694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767498425920137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507045726150594,0.0743379234363954,0.17037316789803586,0.0,0.16764050573666597,0.0,0.091786454127345,0.08171647457360562,0.16647908085777982,0.0,0.06286393485056482,0.0,0.0,0.057797600559686135,0.0,0.13042357395858736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932005418809097,0.0,0.0,0.2546202335962076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21699846500016154,0.05232283041776336,0.08022808161030691,0.25930774301979104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21157759243189814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734199014209973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07871491845703564,0.0,0.0,0.08292715754015159,0.0,0.0580071469091297,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rphoenixr,2020/01/08,"Help, please similar symptoms to depersonalisation and derealization, if anyone got out of this thing please show me the way Been like this since 2016. I have symptoms very similar to those of depersonalisation and derealization I'm positive it's that but if not it's very similar been leaving with constant anxiety since then. All I know it's when it started when I had a period of of constant stress due to the loss of a family member and that caused issues within my then relationship with my partner. Because my life before that precise turning point was starting to get better and been leaving the happiest after previous years suffering depression, then tragedy strikes an do lose a family member. I got angry with myself for feeling distant from friends and partner, so I force myself to love someone I didn't out of pure anger. That cause so much stress and anxiety that after a year-ish I started developing said symptoms including constant extreme anxiety, feeling like everything is unreal/fake, loss of appetite, concentration, lack of Motivation, lack of empathy, lack guilt, emotion overall weather positive or negative. Before you say anything no this is not depression, I've had depression previously and more than a few time throughout my life... This however is completely different. The best way to describe this is imagine your entire self within a cave with a small dirty and blurry window and the cave is your body. You feel like life just passes by and you watch events like a boring movie, like a ghost no mission in life no motivation just lost in a limbo of anxiety, doubt and sometimes sadness but rarely. I don't feel down and in tears I just feel empty no emotion at all for so long and there have been moments of realization and it feels like me again although only lasted for a day and the second time for 3 days. Put of the cave it felt. Also you can't concentrate, you feel like a zombie just walking eating and sleeping. It's hard to remember things no matter how small of a priority it is. I'll go more into detail but first I want to see, if there is anyone that have come through with this and got out of free and happy from something similar. If there is anyone please reach out to me and help me. Tell me how can I get rid of this forever it's been haunting me for a long time. I'll do almost anything I don't care anymore whether its mystical, going to some X place, praying going with a DD disorder specialist, summoning the universe whatever I don't care please. If I come out of this thanks to you  I'll will thank you and reward you somehow, I promise. Please don't ask for money, I don't have any not anymore. I've went to multiple Psychologist, brain scan, neurologist, psychiatrist Catholic mass, meditated you name it. Still the problem persists it won't go away. I won't give you money or at least not now I'll reward you if you can help me afterwards. I won't do psychodelics neither. Thank you in advance. I hope I find the answer soon I'm tired of this...",5.873035698106367,7.186222747349827,6.4982685512367535,74.32215502401019,67.10954063604241,9.550711243997464,33.24073570716681,9.788737146502573,3.360200833559844,2409,106,421,53,39,788,263,566,0.20800000000000002,0.61,0.182,-0.9468,2,0,1,0,0,0,57.0,0,15,0,13,20,38,1,4,26,0,36,13,3,6,4,89,76,44,1,12,20,0,9,7,3,4,8,2,1,3,30,34,1,0,15,1,3,11,21,16,0,2,16,14,48,23,64,56,13,66,1,9,3,1,30,21,0,13,39,285,78,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642129127562205,0.0,0.0,0.051281528440438234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04360786996764808,0.0,0.19622481739021075,0.0,0.1271914953899546,0.13451514282909133,0.0,0.1055404464235004,0.0,0.059949141244657785,0.0,0.06024847545536453,0.0,0.0,0.03909060633037367,0.0,0.10913298325397644,0.0,0.06729626684110271,0.05671422414236201,0.0,0.07122951511666424,0.0,0.07158580895646098,0.0,0.0,0.13076143454080147,0.13175010542820842,0.0,0.1104777189742146,0.0672348770653792,0.2078922315262131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271191289378489,0.0,0.16569485528382086,0.0,0.0,0.06699800763914451,0.07349393643696253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656168935212068,0.0,0.1442662079565818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05763230202851166,0.0,0.12090454649317385,0.0,0.2269681797179216,0.1832464710049497,0.06157100358306055,0.0,0.058609990154491184,0.054545531575607833,0.0,0.0,0.049543578296052236,0.0,0.06700636275469075,0.06151548971927679,0.14577710422879575,0.0,0.1538622288866809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826330531930228,0.05744428850565224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289468916136396,0.0,0.0,0.06369157400461373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693086971853048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03524196528148856,0.05227123798732111,0.0,0.1358003218254505,0.0,0.0,0.1811763235050777,0.21930102600084492,0.0,0.0,0.11349896070331456,0.0,0.07174057638745153,0.07000108965036528,0.0,0.057876206692682626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04713997869602938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04877070255532905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699800763914451,0.35195538392664344,0.060619784834785424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613599089215081,0.0,0.06446432840584912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06884731129499869,0.07264224238015972,0.0,0.06099849810786201,0.05099555849676318,0.0,0.0,0.05110010902478549,0.0,0.06689738954422578,0.0,0.0,0.1060913578079261,0.0,0.06417229777640754,0.0,0.05433374048139713,0.04936731751678073,0.06342224059860536,0.0,0.13616611044094326,0.0,0.051211095858001855,0.0,0.1469122023390814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999543609228579,0.0,0.0,0.056048938891744934,0.17711577901979902,0.0,0.0,0.08520491238563277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217713569429036,0.07370338846192483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975065934953595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582130978011854,0.03782316843552839,0.10180044693533544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059445432173287224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259006603519553
mentalhealth,yeboi9,2020/01/08,"Help needed Hi everyone.
Posted this a few days ago, sorry just really need different opinions..
I have been diagnosed with clinical depression and severe anxiety.
I cant do in a car for 5 minutes without a panic attack, and am always convinced I am dying. Embarrassingly er 51 times this year.
I just feel done I have had like two breakdowns and feel like I wont survive the 3rd.
I feel hopeless.
I just got started on fluoxetine(prozac) and just feel miserable every bit of my body hurts and my muscles wont stop spasming.
I just feel overalls cofuused also lately that everythign makes me want to go mad. I feel like I'm loosing my mind and nothing seems real. I have a family that supports me but that doesnt feel like enough and I know it should.
Please tell i wont end up with another break down, I'm afraid that I might get so mad I kill myself. I told psych that. But they think a hospital setting is bad for me because I'm just so broken. 
Has anyone ever came back form this? Tips please, I feel hopeless. And so so sick of life.",2.2679767711962806,4.659025702439028,3.758606271777005,85.50227642276424,79.78048780487805,6.831591173054588,24.396051103368176,7.957251820313856,1.5667514518002328,819,30,157,15,21,270,129,205,0.22,0.662,0.11800000000000001,-0.9827,1,0,0,0,0,3,24.0,0,0,1,1,13,19,4,4,6,0,18,5,1,1,1,42,43,15,2,4,9,0,8,4,0,5,4,0,0,0,9,11,0,1,11,0,0,3,6,13,1,1,6,8,25,6,12,32,4,20,0,5,0,0,5,4,0,3,14,97,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042259826487862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059603136207227,0.09426433618452766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879189823052998,0.08666468341982067,0.0,0.0,0.07921330525195665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888096924534975,0.0,0.08711115096979619,0.09459039160077466,0.0690590531283059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368068871524401,0.12583695497511518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957080359223894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306111266989268,0.0,0.0975744207992434,0.1149845021180208,0.117574615185253,0.11836140196800313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159325199936457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033916432610933,0.11705634679757675,0.0,0.0,0.10247509579955832,0.09544966647787093,0.10825113102932056,0.0,0.0,0.10679744168150908,0.0,0.4582528073837922,0.2427979947999521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059188081227269276,0.0,0.06438393856534202,0.0,0.09060642130851022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593427231951147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127669018487965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12533591480054412,0.0,0.06225988750727485,0.0,0.12779331703418773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800183632660009,0.22138634356571446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562033480651546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018021248337266,0.11438815427977644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680026001392153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870248187259096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291855798440538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487114715178789,0.0,0.0,0.10849817955239648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894606011300366,0.0725749202889897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313275186181037,0.0,0.12798271169555248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681616321236042,0.08018552740217864,0.0,0.0,0.09471348388080687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855739555413698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901833233276387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725901025578127,0.0,0.0,0.06605889497015233,0.0,0.0,0.10825113102932056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066549769271702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681994585590377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920517789278904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295348286479672
mentalhealth,ineedhelpwp,2020/01/08,"how do i be happy when i have to deal with school the work, the people always bring me down. the fact that im not confident the fact that i have bad anxiety kills me and i feel if i want to be happy then its not possible in school

i need hlep im lost i dont know what to do",-0.5683854166666684,0.810522265625,2.213750000000001,98.18958333333336,84.15625,6.1416666666666675,15.354166666666664,7.1686216300943375,-0.4888770833333331,211,3,57,3,6,74,40,64,0.19899999999999998,0.6729999999999999,0.127,-0.6031,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,2,5,1,0,4,0,7,0,0,1,2,12,13,5,1,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,1,9,2,6,10,0,5,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,37,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17034290816391684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566097509023838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17093211538771128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110566721003757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23992956654265826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351226010230873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4358551332707271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44226408002030654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264916413638729,0.0,0.1125084069884776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234753658348632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517968122683863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192662841746642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230790319994578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4143738457629295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074878327439365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490381330789224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ughineedadvice,2020/01/08,"My (29F) ex girlfriend (47F) won’t leave me alone; what do I do? I decided to break up with her a few weeks ago due to behavior explained here: https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/e9u62j/my_f29_girlfriend_f47_of_2_months_is_emotionally/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Since then we’ve still been spending a lot of time together and having sex occasionally; I hoped we could have a friends with benefits situation rather than something serious.

On New Years Day I invited her out with me and my friends. I thought we had a pretty good day but we had a massive fight on the car ride back and separated angry. She started calling and texting me incessantly so I turned my phone off. I finally got a message on Instagram when I was watching tv on my laptop, that she had taken a lethal amount of pills. 

I called the cops, took a car to her house and showed the officers the message. They took her in an ambulance to the hospital, where she stayed for the next two days. I felt really compassionate for her and went to visit her as soon as I was allowed to. She ended up being released that day so I brought her home, made her dinner, and slept over to keep an eye on her.

The next day I went home and haven’t seen her since, but she is making my life a living hell. It started out as constant texting and calling again; I tried to respond whenever she got in touch because I was worried, but i was getting absolutely nothing done. I told her I needed space and she got upset. Many angry escalating text exchanges later, we talked over video chat and decided not to text anymore, as it always seems to go wrong. About ten minutes after hanging up, she started texting me again. I told her that if she didn’t stop I would block her. She didn’t, so I did it.

She has continued to find new ways to contact me, including email and texting from another number. I just got a message from her while I was at work, saying that she dropped her cat off outside my house, she couldn’t take care of him and “thanks for my help”. I can’t even bring the cat inside because of my roommate’s pitbull, who she is well aware of. 

I am fucking furious and a little scared. I suspect she’s trying to force contact even though I clearly told her I do not want to talk to her. She claims she has been diagnosed as bipolar but this behavior suggests borderline personality disorder to me (I’m a new psychotherapist and have never seen anything like this, but matched her behavior to this diagnosis in the DSM). 

I called the therapy center she goes to and left a message for her therapist. I don’t know what she’ll be able to do because of HIPPA (confidentiality laws) but I want this shit to stop NOW. Is there anything else I can do? I don’t want to see her and am thinking of bringing her cat to the animal shelter.",6.078989036474803,7.382196624288426,6.128654332700823,77.1966416297702,66.62808349146111,8.739806029938858,31.716687750368965,8.998388855275968,2.6016165296226026,2259,90,416,38,36,715,261,527,0.13,0.804,0.066,-0.9886,2,1,1,0,1,0,74.0,4,0,1,1,20,19,5,2,26,0,41,10,3,3,2,66,85,36,1,10,11,1,2,1,3,3,4,1,2,1,14,26,1,4,10,4,2,13,11,9,1,2,33,8,93,10,64,45,3,76,1,0,5,2,78,23,3,4,37,289,107,2,0.07796263817589683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910917474652005,0.0,0.0,0.08074578084876563,0.0,0.0,0.06487116041907473,0.16894497178227605,0.0,0.0,0.08175062381507528,0.0,0.0,0.07731798788468229,0.0,0.0,0.12831321674295912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994845641080776,0.0,0.14257590182694346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3184342812923913,0.0,0.07948810555778603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424991513351762,0.0,0.062246822705847714,0.0,0.0,0.2513972596765945,0.0,0.0,0.07913043664789418,0.0,0.0,0.08935193771578955,0.0,0.0,0.07978284690376683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512778024873386,0.0,0.06905175688685672,0.0,0.0,0.10298717446405492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485635882316682,0.08540425933804709,0.07125643888049134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046748172002422,0.07207520272040183,0.04073226065768056,0.0,0.04430796392506397,0.06539136198962757,0.249415375087207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05225671298742214,0.0,0.1564057655507872,0.07743449091697682,0.0,0.1799168339816303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929677497758073,0.0,0.0,0.042846227042342484,0.0,0.0,0.08255117691198556,0.0847066344937125,0.0,0.05506731697276367,0.038088606967777945,0.07813904497218822,0.0688424378510617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06628104700682308,0.0,0.07377013329976274,0.05204066637221804,0.07904187839043393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780830834642615,0.06012959280544039,0.22589040529868815,0.16582830033382512,0.0,0.0,0.07480725399375222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807396849605395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931603109924659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04994486236292379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06199901906864042,0.07805420150626735,0.0,0.062126128769398034,0.07097425772342376,0.0,0.0,0.08002752773434321,0.12898299988555,0.08763327181619858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06001944777768808,0.0,0.0,0.16554706971718885,0.08309779903642177,0.06226106355571648,0.130360512901798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05861820133823899,0.12532683078707854,0.0,0.07177752262158682,0.08915707126542792,0.09052063189202864,0.0,0.049955310549758894,0.07659789616988393,0.061893626200471084,0.04546064127929373,0.0,0.0,0.2234899253775884,0.17323871926180284,0.1058630274389168,0.08480096280025264,0.0761581690834559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13795315181534284,0.061883113321923776,0.0625369257108635,0.0,0.07009777465657578,0.1445442933266095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056757729122592124,0.079174843464138,0.0,0.055382421302791064,0.08523990606536504,0.0,0.050205382879779326
mentalhealth,geo_jam,2020/01/08,"When seeking a therapist, what are the practical differences between the acronyms do, LMHC, LICSW, MD PhD, MA, MSW, PsyD, LMFT and ARNP?  

It's hard for an outsider to understand what these will mean at a practical level. How might the therapy feel different?",7.317333333333334,8.751371844444446,7.042222222222224,71.29000000000002,63.88888888888889,12.222222222222225,39.444444444444436,11.855464076750405,5.415444444444447,203,11,33,7,3,64,40,45,0.040999999999999995,0.9590000000000001,0.0,-0.1926,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,0,4,0,0,1,0,6,7,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,21,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6168248131964169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925774873153633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644337031449109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3215502042611575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31315165198449485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3375773349531031,0.34274021385705994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3073048789720645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leahhhhh,2020/01/08,"Reddit is bad for my mental health. I feel like every time I express my opinion, I get attacked and ripped apart. It hurts so bad knowing that my words are so useless and stupid that strangers hate me. I’m too old to be so upset by something like this, but I feel so fragile that I can’t take it. Reddit commenters are actually driving me to self harm and suicide. There’s nowhere safe to go.",3.575991561181436,4.950465354430381,4.033607594936711,89.59488396624474,72.67088607594937,5.772995780590718,29.62236286919831,5.46131890053228,1.0979856540084376,309,13,63,1,6,97,56,79,0.341,0.621,0.038,-0.9805,0,0,1,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,0,6,12,3,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,10,13,8,1,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,3,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,9,0,0,0,3,10,3,5,12,0,5,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,36,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.22823769953249476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26607757667439136,0.0,0.0,0.3905678599592615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19705792173600645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23651823307752545,0.16708725489379864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219508677792695,0.0,0.13292204776646818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309126902125743,0.0,0.24860846714095836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25037837642308114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285368979528654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285284714635825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357007369764163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454226174015842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439927190347665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18005584544384765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558318678294206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175852164442571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13638003185703446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cloakanddagger1,2020/01/08,"Gay/bi and disgusted? Please don't take this post wrong... i have absolutely zero issue with everyone else being however they want to classify themselves. I am 100% jealous you are getting to live your best lives. 

For me though.... i hate myself. I cant explain why but i do. I know im attracted to men, but my brain just cant cope with it, i feel constantly disgusted my myself and wish to be normal. Im constantly angry with myself - to the point of frustration tears or a more permanent ending just to make it stop. It angers me when people say its a choice and people choose this lifestyle... i wish they could see the pain that i inflict on myself daily as punishment for being this person.

Its like i have 2 very separate people inside my heart and brain wanting 2 very different things. Im so drained and tired from all of it and i have nowhere to turn that will understand half of what i feel.",1.8902840909090912,4.4566338238636405,3.3294999999999995,86.86550000000004,82.92045454545455,6.92909090909091,22.43636363636364,8.07648339933343,1.4687463636363636,707,24,137,15,20,231,111,176,0.235,0.6679999999999999,0.098,-0.9838,2,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,2,1,5,12,7,0,4,0,14,5,3,1,1,29,29,13,0,6,5,0,2,1,0,1,2,1,0,2,13,9,0,1,6,0,0,0,3,9,0,2,0,4,25,3,18,24,3,8,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,1,6,93,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181142944006152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804264857203383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714620339109968,0.0,0.10028288497055206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131227236978887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492425815747866,0.0,0.11124598962460208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001798380740195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701617408825902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656218009620752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400585814293205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488388386473357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4070147680476793,0.13109573569804084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902751130309075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06136273668598687,0.0,0.22181753143399674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384023364947983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306317963764565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364926138653505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26122959722377603,0.10967072141880486,0.0,0.1378731523519273,0.11873437957990453,0.0,0.12029188640186204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09988366035851401,0.0,0.0,0.1000884407303565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500880006205564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443698628220973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344431143100113,0.0,0.12340321444019875,0.0,0.0,0.14436089019144266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366187835494275,0.0,0.13075599202522334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20726941867773346,0.14816649218331351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133361652206268,0.0,0.28887193855136994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732594409273555,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wearejoemama,2020/01/08,"Thinking about the Future (possible triggers?) TW: addiction(?) and distressing thoughts

Although this probably applies to everyone despite their monetary situation, I come from a not-exactly-middle-class-but-not-poor-either class family in the US and one of my deepest worries is not being able to support myself financially in the future, which is mainly having enough money to buy the fuck ton of pills I'm on to keep myself emotionally stable once I move away from my parents. I know that I'm a junior in high school and that such problems should really be the least of my concerns since I'm still a kid but I'm really worried that one day it'll come to a point where either my family, or when I grow up, there'll be no way to buy something that is the \*only\* reason I'm here. My whole mental stability depends on these pills due to the numerous mental illnesses I have (ADHD, OCD, social anxiety, and depression) and traumatic experiences in my childhood that probably would've never been able to deal with if I never had any medication for it. I know the pill thing kinda sounds like an addiction but I do genuinely believe that I would never be here had medication never entered my life (and therapy too, albeit I don't do it anymore because it's too expensive for my family so I use resources at my school as much as possible).

The biggest fear to me, though, is the thought that I'll end up as my unmediated self, but homeless. It's already scary enough about how people treat the homeless (especially those who are mentally ill too) by videotaping them, harassing, etc. Like of course it's not okay for someone to- lets say- shave themselves on a subway train but I feel the real thing people should be angry at is the system which didn't even take care of them in the first place. It's scary how a person can be viewed as nothing unless they have money on them. I hate it so much. I never chose to be this way, I would love to be neurotypical in a heartbeat. I want to be normal so bad but such a thing for me relies on a substance and it's scary how easily it can be taken away from me.",6.755442794573227,6.667804307125312,7.489191325713066,72.88668945625469,64.8968058968059,10.714624505928851,33.174767653028525,10.374825546531014,3.4160226257878445,1671,63,303,37,23,558,212,407,0.17,0.775,0.055,-0.9946,2,0,1,0,0,0,51.0,1,0,5,1,20,15,3,2,24,1,34,12,0,7,5,49,57,28,0,8,11,1,1,2,0,5,10,2,0,3,27,10,0,1,7,0,5,5,10,8,0,3,7,4,37,7,51,34,10,44,0,1,1,2,15,22,1,4,16,226,64,4,0.16439236493495846,0.0,0.0,0.17921194300353308,0.09878383818686663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070553129042047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589622270508439,0.0,0.06287985460677667,0.0,0.08151652623464582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154452038322132,0.0,0.06863037902350981,0.05010602991479232,0.0,0.0,0.09260695029586756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380448611399073,0.0,0.0,0.14160946609668768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530097377710087,0.08474065490171058,0.07079545151599383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245964197221287,0.07280142054667971,0.1698612578269379,0.09167047103081538,0.054289803309110485,0.0,0.0,0.07854197478769133,0.0,0.08040363866402317,0.23246173667230466,0.09249355717490117,0.04156085957450399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991603081689854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598904619954587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115171305841845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684477966046276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730597436635494,0.0,0.0,0.09034574453649608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840511655347415,0.058057594506687314,0.08031380572812594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741852638301233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16560801271801948,0.2485032575363367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736153380929372,0.1208473034551338,0.0,0.3169738157641783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805348069161363,0.07886945392084647,0.0,0.0,0.08753625173467136,0.11139652098777232,0.06251390066835517,0.0,0.0,0.09126913336775903,0.0,0.0,0.1139689669167907,0.07177053607604802,0.08587751611286835,0.0,0.07770196058585918,0.18532769105744912,0.0,0.0,0.17724277380000442,0.0786506457844607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355725068243873,0.1053139584844172,0.08451136533142697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536570341133237,0.0,0.16637384980367334,0.0,0.0,0.08574854463487801,0.0,0.0,0.06799353152901154,0.09239195297848964,0.0,0.08378865681625544,0.06964455866800116,0.06327863700560872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564197749566628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327525379526436,0.0,0.0,0.0618012997744211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399849811989593,0.0,0.16382247384960033,0.052667994788778684,0.08075733194148521,0.13050917495300246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887188695936537,0.07099111067866612,0.0,0.0,0.04848143804897328,0.1304870074506308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176910233003796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16694842638674035,0.0,0.17516942910363448,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lotusmoon92,2020/01/08,"got my BPD diagnosis today ... i guess i just needed to say that. I’ve always thought this was what i was dealing with but never wanted to hear it. so i avoided long term therapy and avoided seeing a licensed professional who could diagnose me. 

until everything started falling apart because my ex has ruined my fucking life and i let him. my explosive feelings and actions started getting out of hand and then came the suicidal thoughts. i have children and i fucking hate myself for dreaming of dying. 

i come from a long line of bipolar women on my moms side. my mom didn’t get help until i was 20 and by then a ton of damage had been done .... trust me i’m grateful she’s on meds and more balanced now but i resent her for what she put me through as a kid. 

i have my med appt next month. i hope i can be okay through all this bullshit in my life. my life feels like it’s too much to handle by myself and i’m so overwhelmed that i have to be a mother for the rest of my fucking life and my kids have TWO bipolar parents. fuck this shit. why me. 

vent over. thanks for listening.",1.9955220620358207,4.113238954128441,3.398020969855832,89.19007645259941,79.18348623853211,5.620270860637834,26.43599825251201,6.655083550727371,1.1031264307557889,844,35,170,8,21,276,135,218,0.193,0.684,0.12300000000000001,-0.9714,1,2,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,5,17,7,3,7,1,17,13,2,0,2,29,43,18,2,4,3,5,3,1,0,0,7,3,0,4,10,13,0,2,4,1,0,5,2,12,0,1,11,7,35,5,27,28,6,26,0,3,1,4,19,7,5,2,15,121,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677471684850322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708981846457272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464815309138717,0.0,0.0,0.13302144095011514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018608630517184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285973309498748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990490183393382,0.0,0.1180466874837447,0.1207057785974436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901995229623248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452704560893106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761416744288615,0.08308800602366244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43008679296043,0.12152867210272385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301938698876124,0.0,0.12812259302853699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482668146961428,0.0,0.0,0.13108369995695407,0.0,0.07795649977773915,0.0,0.0,0.11551667774074502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892929980492115,0.3285974213021171,0.05682053674774103,0.0,0.0,0.20585176410500586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25837631027191105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724290068113315,0.09283319590330584,0.0,0.08549723904358762,0.08623836286534785,0.08970125214919485,0.0,0.12369122662985176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12914245812264136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691821354097165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924900599356075,0.0,0.0,0.09267968202992567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938496685654428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646419425158469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721831948682422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707761943701297,0.1330044086002906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846656699705488,0.0,0.0,0.11024313053929463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361266240868335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859944706319163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494678185103347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imaaccident,2020/01/09,"hi, first time posting i’ve had mental heath problems for a few years now and it’s been a bumpy road. i’ve tried multiple medications but i haven’t found the one for me yet. this isn’t what i mainly wanted to talk about. i’m on my phone at work and just typing words to be honest. 

i work at a grocery store, kroger. i work in the online shopping department, so people place orders online and then i shop what they wanted and then take it to their cars when they arrive. when i first started everything was great. i liked my manager and the other people i worked with. over winter break, i took a vacation with my fiancées family down to florida (i live in indiana) and i really enjoyed getting out of the house and spending time with them. they’re all really cool and amazing people. after i came back home, work turned into a nightmare. there was a bunch of drama because someone in the department wasn’t doing their job and everyone was being petty about it. since i was gone for a week and had only been doing my job for about 2 weeks, it took me a while to get back into the swing of things. hell, i’m still not back into it. everything i do has been scrutinized all week. i’m a really quiet person. i don’t really talk back unless i’m really pissed. that hasn’t happened yet, for better or worse. i’ve felt like i’ve had a target on my back this week. i can’t do anything right and it’s driving me insane. every time i show up i have a panic attack. i’ve been having one since about 5 and it hasn’t gone away. it’s really slow and i have nothing to do right now. i hate going to work. i live with my parents now and i plan on moving out with my fiancée when she graduates from school. i don’t get many hours even after telling my boss i want more so i’m really only making enough to make my car payments. i want to quit my job and do temporary work for a few months until i move out and find a more permanent full time job, but my parents don’t want me to do that. they are aware of my mental health issues and they try to help. that’s all they really can do. i’ve explained my current situation to them and they try to sympathize with me but they just tell me to not be sad. i’m not sure if if that’s what they’re really saying. i kind of space out and don’t really hear anything with i get chastised like that. i don’t want to let my family down. i want to be independent and help support my fiancée when she starts college so we don’t have to worry about money. am i crazy here? is it okay for me to feel like this? am i too sensitive? that’s what my mom said. that i wouldn’t do well in a factory because i don’t like messing up and being scolded for it. but i feel like that’s gonna happen anywhere i work. i’m tired of always feeling like i’m being too sensitive and overreacting to doing my job wrong. i can’t do this though. i can’t stop pacing. i can’t stop thinking about everything. my mind is moving at 100 miles an hour. i’m not even sure if typing this helped me. i don’t know what to do. i don’t want to feel like this anymore. i know it won’t happen instantly but i just want to start taking steps in the right direction. i’m tired of feeling like i use my problems as an excuse or a crutch for everything.",1.320532023043036,3.2368017738619703,3.3109779735682814,89.98506404608608,80.45374449339207,6.422780978199482,19.87486727662939,7.497074112349321,0.5392231831017731,2532,64,549,38,65,855,265,681,0.109,0.758,0.133,0.8389,8,0,0,0,0,0,61.0,1,0,11,13,35,31,4,1,24,2,61,5,1,5,5,94,118,46,0,15,18,3,6,9,0,3,4,4,1,1,32,38,0,2,12,4,5,15,24,10,1,4,20,11,85,21,81,88,11,93,1,1,0,0,32,32,2,5,52,366,117,20,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043300168065909216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051608169921687805,0.0,0.0,0.08564643848137306,0.0,0.0,0.05920126162981354,0.048891846884735315,0.20007182090707185,0.0,0.06344432535067307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04602378968093916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951813590450705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053769640721751256,0.0,0.06874182509020542,0.0,0.04384464759011554,0.049724979314750666,0.18707525228454025,0.0,0.09811445899891696,0.0,0.1315610467034842,0.18588143382108516,0.049965083049324635,0.0,0.047562210377791035,0.08852777627599401,0.0,0.05705748624215585,0.0,0.0,0.10875179175388314,0.0,0.0295746564763066,0.0,0.0,0.057372586699028484,0.0,0.0,0.1380523169693683,0.0,0.0,0.05137720644399717,0.0,0.055314450359000525,0.05865112731585445,0.0,0.10464084996984398,0.0,0.052198819098316335,0.0,0.10249480299647888,0.0600453968987441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054314633016148584,0.25820071318690274,0.0,0.0,0.05419004898671431,0.05719795421997776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05321285183996525,0.0,0.2288102702652721,0.0,0.0919018284785108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947215328420024,0.05275883145054065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052423274491253335,0.10488505773755166,0.0,0.052544010869260784,0.06094681630237096,0.041536602902194776,0.1659259449478267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049932306583592184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052521555289742,0.07915518870058984,0.0,0.06105592138830264,0.1155651046731324,0.0,0.0,0.10823074931168596,0.04543797671801518,0.05436911567168486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983846064822848,0.0,0.0,0.09958755799801927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055349308558258564,0.0,0.0,0.3333717048334789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332168346535905,0.049500492869697335,0.04138307266666792,0.0,0.05266570048923433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609350498141012,0.05849341021948419,0.0,0.0,0.044092018930163325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049927109775154,0.0,0.04155798198319375,0.08701296664559484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05905262858598888,0.09809126683149973,0.0,0.07825289244928403,0.08365308715292549,0.09096781678325702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03457204102427392,0.03334414443360593,0.05112752348231149,0.0,0.12137617980384545,0.11962111095196985,0.0,0.0,0.11563328929373146,0.10599209688385372,0.05660290208593479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04494452195236954,0.0,0.0,0.2762426918327401,0.0,0.16696845723816894,0.0,0.046788825790504585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030769536627498,0.052847582908061824,0.05303163728380142,0.0,0.056895887705861785,0.0,0.0335110625810318
mentalhealth,Euphoric-Translator,2020/01/09,"How do I overcome my addiction of excessively consuming depressing reading material? I have some reading habits that I think are damaging my mental health. I'm a 24F and have been reading about TRP, Incels, Nice guys, Dead Bedrooms, NoFap and a whole lot more over the years and I think it's getting the best of me. 

​

I have had these tendencies for a while, but only in these past 2 years have I come to realise how bad I think they're affecting my psyche. I have always been pretty level headed and forward thinking, but that hasn't stopped me from feeling blue or pretty down for periods of time. I was at my absolute lowest about 4 years ago when I was in a pretty shit relationship. I feel that my reading habits might relate back to how my ex was, and perhaps me trying to make sense/protect myself from being in a horrible situation again. I feel like the more I know about the worst face of misogyny, the better I'll be  prepared in dealing with it/avoiding it should I see it in person. 

​

The reality is I am and have moved on tremendously since I started reading negative things. I feel that it's only now that I'm in a better place (generally happier, in a healthy relationship, creatively satisfied in work, a new hobby or two etc) that I can see how bad these things are.

​

I'm not sure what I'm asking really. I feel I can't 'just quit', but I know they're not helping me. I need another outlet but I don't know what this outlet is exactly helping me with. 

​

How do I overcome my addiction of excessively consuming depressing reading material?",6.654353369763204,6.93637544262295,7.422267759562846,72.02852003642991,65.0655737704918,10.712204007285974,35.6329690346084,10.504223727775694,3.8729963570127497,1270,57,225,30,18,424,156,305,0.154,0.695,0.151,-0.4885,1,1,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,0,5,13,13,1,0,14,0,27,6,3,7,2,46,51,19,1,2,9,1,5,1,0,2,3,0,1,2,18,9,0,1,12,6,0,3,6,7,0,1,6,8,37,6,29,41,8,32,0,3,3,0,9,15,1,5,17,160,55,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587313721540435,0.0,0.0,0.06453519844287939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060577676208984924,0.3155267681862994,0.3538529832121507,0.0,0.07633997584381115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06806069428085199,0.0,0.0,0.055980780337860914,0.12157442245508193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640193918746224,0.12877613892669362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271307728382143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750563841022337,0.12540971291380082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119425195028411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840561560127853,0.05201026145734944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03803640448915748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07208611629471831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471657095038838,0.07738586276212744,0.0,0.0,0.09759622669450832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003137534986145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03556772046684239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061894249747245514,0.0,0.0,0.048596365732176315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07336799544420752,0.07723215686039828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773777456045866,0.0,0.05398227752635157,0.0,0.07031329865999379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073946373756986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949841231572418,0.0,0.06356850710199483,0.07606332335511723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22219954841593095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743462997948944,0.4369343921232553,0.0,0.04663927207372545,0.0,0.0,0.15632570238110344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602864781200033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473092251747562,0.06022314348205269,0.08183328201501842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05153012382230256,0.0,0.0,0.060866314784468585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861568056737011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673375419071753,0.186596114997984,0.0,0.0,0.0424518382264072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04942825253370933,0.0,0.07111765656114531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128161153804679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05300123066913225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3538529832121507,0.1406476502836744
mentalhealth,buttfuckery-clements,2020/01/09,"Rotten I feel so fucking angry and black inside like my heart and brain are rotten. I can’t fucking do anything, I can barely get out of bed most of the time. When I die I will have wasted my life waiting for a train that never came, and I will probably die as miserably as I have lived",3.654,4.1781544,5.010000000000002,85.86000000000001,71.66666666666666,7.333333333333332,25.0,7.1686216300943375,1.0135000000000003,224,6,47,2,4,75,44,60,0.35100000000000003,0.614,0.036000000000000004,-0.9722,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,2,1,2,0,8,5,2,0,1,9,14,7,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,1,4,9,1,6,11,1,5,0,1,1,2,0,1,2,1,4,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025500001854076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747705947579754,0.0,0.28151546409288003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5109032504511047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244543988363446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4550998780936338,0.1285965641449478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916738489459213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17385403228393806,0.1202502367911164,0.0,0.2173437180275757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18983623578369588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653776063247968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352462097486868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bvisocky,2020/01/09,"Help Us!😞😞😞 
""Call my dad!,"" ""Please call my dad!,"" ""I cannot, not right now, we need to get you to the hospital."" I remember the day, it was sunny, working with one of my best friends. Stand by fire! Excited, usually one of those calls that we get to stand there and hope no one gets hurt. 

As we were en route, we started to receive updates via our truck computer… house on fire, neighbors state its an abandoned house, I remember telling my partner ""oh, another one."" Next update, neighbors report there's a man on fire walking down the street. Our jaws drop, we hoped it wasn't right, or some feeble attempt to get the fire department there faster. 

I remember turning the corner and seeing him. He stood on the corner silent, not waving his hands, not yelling, not doing anything but standing there. Still smoldering, naked, all of his hair was gone, anything to make him recognizable gone — just a human figure standing there. His eyes matched the neighbors who witnessed the event, wider then I have ever seen. ""Am I going to die?""… ""not now""….. ""call my dad""…. ""not now""... What else could I say to him? The 23-year-old has suffered more burns than I have seen on some dead people, and yet he was talking to me. 

“What happened?”

""They said if I told anyone they would do this to each of my family members..."" Silence. ""Tell us something before you pass out."" 

En route to the hospital, we did everything we could do for him. We gave him medications, started IVs, called the hospital, and let them know we were coming and get everyone to the trauma bay. We arrived at the hospital and started our update... 23 y/o male … ""He's dead"" The doctor said. I couldn't even get through my report, and the doctor took a 4 ft away assessment and told us he was dead. ""He's still talking sir"" I remember uttering back. ""It doesn't matter; he is dead or is going to be."" He then went on to explain that he had full-thickness burns 100% of his body, and there was nothing they could do but delay death. Three nurses then left the room, crying. 

I remember walking out of the room with tears building in my own eyes. I stood outside the room for a moment to gather myself and remember overhearing the social worker talking on the phone, ""get here now sir, I know you're busy, but this is urgent."" She laid down the phone, knowing she couldn't tell him what had happened, just that he needed to be there, now with his dying son. 

This is just one of the hundreds of people that live now in my memories. They may not show up every day, but they do show up. I find that certain events trigger these people back into the images in my mind, regressed is some dark place. Things like a house fire or ""Call my dad"" bring them back. I re-live it like I was there, what could I have done differently? Maybe if I... has replayed hundreds of times in my head. In school, I was told not to burden any of the blame when people die because of their own poor decisions; however, what was never taught is it is impossible to be a compassionate human being and not burden any fault when a person dies.

As Paramedics, EMTs, Dispatchers, Firefighters, and Police Officers, we are faced with more trauma in one week than most people will see in their lifetime. 

What's the worse thing you have seen? That's a famous line at every family gathering. Well, welcome back to all the people living in that repressed dark lace in my head. Some of them are the unspoken ones, the ones you don't want to talk about. The kid being sexually and mentally assaulted by the live-in boyfriend. The elderly man that died months ago, but the family needed to live off his checks, the young mother who just lost her life in an MVA surrounded by her family, while the children escaped relatively unharmed. Yet still, only the tip of the iceberg. 

The phone rang, ""are you ready for in-service?"". No, I want to go and hug my family and tell them that I love them, I want to be anywhere but here right now focused on the kid who was dying in the other room, waiting for his father to come to the hospital. Most of all, I want just a minute to think about what just happened, decompress, gather myself, and talk about what I just saw. ""In-service,"" "" ok, you got one"" onto the next call. 

It's part of the job. That's old school thinking, and it's time for a change. Years ago, we used not to wear gloves either, and doctors used to smoke while assessing patients, we have since found out that wasn’t the best idea, and learned from that. Now it's time to change the way that we also treat mental health with first responders. Mental health is just as if not more important than physical health. 

Cleveland EMS is broken, Cleveland Public Safety is broken. It used to be a respected profession. Now we are spit on... When we try and go to administration with concerns, we are spit on by them. It's almost impossible to go home healthy after that. I couldn't do it. I wasn't strong enough, and bless those who are. The City of Cleveland broke me, and I had to leave to try and fix me.

The City of Cleveland has thousands of public safety workers. They make them wear things like ballistic vests, turnout jackets, and helmets to protect them physically. However, they do not want to protect them mentally. In 13 years, I have seen more people die due to suicide than due to a line of duty death, yet this is a non-issue for the city. Suicide is the final event that is a culmination of many events, yet that is when the city acknowledges that person. Those deaths fall directly on your inactions to address the issues. Every day I say a prayer to help those who help you, and hope today wasn't their last. 

Charles Cali (Former #235, EMS)",3.8930699719264763,5.65505912165899,4.292963610360719,86.4968509984639,72.52995391705069,7.311086392287727,25.65098787012024,7.990435384864732,1.4392092271836434,4397,143,864,63,87,1381,433,1085,0.13,0.775,0.095,-0.9928,4,0,2,0,2,2,217.0,22,8,19,9,48,33,1,1,67,1,78,24,13,7,6,154,147,50,15,22,33,6,7,3,5,3,9,6,9,13,55,55,0,7,19,2,2,18,25,12,1,12,41,22,115,21,124,88,21,141,2,5,9,2,146,48,0,17,71,574,170,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344542126346093,0.0,0.04148335372301769,0.0,0.0,0.03312931453254485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634382921837047,0.04344002823555103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02896685942418893,0.0,0.06818210673128418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03892221535060828,0.1274198296054087,0.0,0.025253634822741088,0.0,0.03525149345241552,0.0,0.08695057494764127,0.0,0.0,0.0460162768557384,0.0,0.0,0.29611260035335113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764896290718659,0.07137172412842338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230498360633822,0.0,0.04550583071406709,0.08015134477795323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009642303605486,0.04328260361250835,0.0,0.12720747487650358,0.0,0.042394405821930485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03460710733319261,0.0,0.0,0.04280536876487375,0.0,0.02736227295792928,0.03747327150488746,0.1047126008246668,0.03958546212737828,0.03723209348868756,0.0,0.1952693723744645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04538146944876218,0.03786370760833943,0.03523795266773306,0.0,0.045422783314306006,0.03200654969447809,0.0,0.15150800438526138,0.0,0.117720153935365,0.0,0.03313311394625365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109901800670365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503251188837126,0.1321055197985822,0.0,0.0,0.08330333085184717,0.0,0.04155485643203294,0.12343966253204412,0.0,0.14340426990304622,0.04434867128498653,0.046766262960365367,0.0,0.08647846124233148,0.04111010077420061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830191229059338,0.033768694829343686,0.0,0.04386542008592402,0.04501077083483763,0.04236211578625769,0.02926125444087157,0.06071770776486605,0.0,0.14632389598978546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04522267933845545,0.0,0.03738966278470922,0.0,0.0553059514682056,0.042000675576964464,0.04161918765420136,0.0,0.0,0.04173354268950028,0.1669954834779022,0.0,0.04182965947798112,0.0,0.033066793465654096,0.0,0.0,0.09215322512395732,0.03195120828886988,0.0,0.08811658813821087,0.0,0.0,0.03975051288982806,0.0,0.08694174904826578,0.0,0.2526492679323872,0.0315072501554885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044861617379853336,0.0,0.20104281596199733,0.07234526112641804,0.04328260361250835,0.04547462203304295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28157363120994056,0.10613579983955293,0.07881350229938404,0.06588913975777047,0.0,0.08385307026201172,0.06602422494078787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034269005516145916,0.0,0.0,0.04222981036661647,0.0,0.031892680257005694,0.0,0.0,0.08796714993997748,0.0,0.09925143929006988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09062925938475876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16648805886723028,0.1448367848798959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825671668138788,0.05308975025575464,0.0,0.0,0.07246959528697604,0.0,0.03926813887078712,0.11875638638213484,0.046027140253061115,0.05625269492071368,0.04506089429699963,0.0,0.0,0.14949545184999913,0.10733939135400727,0.04562620478628147,0.0,0.12217417087845035,0.0328829807597438,0.03323039864245673,0.0,0.03724802537554976,0.0384034267285787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03015949286513575,0.0,0.04221785304248567,0.02942869219675338,0.0,0.0,0.0800332700142194
mentalhealth,Tallisorah,2020/01/09,"I know I probably need help but I also really don't want it I've struggled with my mental health for most of my life. Having alcoholic parents mentally abusing you throughout your life does that, I guess. But I got by. I've struggled with overthinking, anxiety and low self-esteem. I first visited therapist 3 years back, after I've found out my two closest friends have been talking about me behind my back (they said I was complaining all the time and that I've ruined our vacation because of it), which led to me isolating myself from everyone, and creating a new happy place in my mind - my own funeral. I couldn't stop thinking about it, and it made me feel calm.   


Eventually, I realised I can either call it quits or get help. I chose the latter, and was seeing a therapist for a few months, but then my school started again, and I didn't have enough money to keep going to her. But she helped me with my most urgent problems, and I've felt quite content ever since. (The only thing that stuck with me is that I've kept my complaints to a minimum, and every time I do complain about something, I get anxious my friends will find me annoying again).  


For a past year or so, I had trouble focusing and feeling motivated. My favorite thing to do was laying in my bed and watching some shitty youtuber talking about nothing (and that's not a good hobby if you're working on getting a degree as I do). I thought about having depression, but I didn't feel sad, I actually felt quite happy. Around this time, I met this guy and fell for him. It took me about 6 months to actually speak to him, but we started to see each other and man, did it feel good to have someone like that. He was as reserved as I was, smart, funny and probably the nicest guy I've ever met. And because of it, I felt really safe with him. That changed, when his ex (they were together for 7 years) learnt about us, and texted him saying how much she misses him, that she has severe depression and wants to get together again. And he agreed. I'm not mad at him for doing so, because I know he didn't want to hurt me, and that it must have been hard to make this decision, even though I would prefer him choosing me. His best friend told me he got together with her out of pity, but I don't really think it matters.   


The day he told me, I was crying for a bit, but I was fine. Even laughed about it with my friends. Probably because I was sure he would eventually realise he made a mistake and come back to me. The next day, I realised I couldn't take him back even if he wanted to, because I would be asking for him to hurt me again. This realisation hurt me as hell, and I couldn't stop crying. Today, I feel empty. I don't know how else to describe it. I just want to lay in my bed and stare at the wall. And I don't even think about him that much today. I know something is wrong, but I'm not sure if it's just me dealing with a heartbreak or if the heartbreak only started something. I've wanted to reach out to a therapist again, but I also feel kind of bad because of it, and don't want to go there. I don't know why. I don't know what to do, but I feel lost and scared, because I have exams this month and I don't know how I can make myself study even though I really need to.  


Any recommendations on how to feel better again and how to get through the exams would be much appreciated.  


Also, I'm sorry for any mispells, I don't speak English that well.",4.589367560497057,4.948665430215829,5.49425604970569,83.80491579463705,69.5179856115108,8.50523217789405,28.74509483322433,8.438071523408619,1.86873381294964,2674,90,560,38,44,879,277,695,0.17,0.67,0.16,-0.7644,2,0,4,0,0,0,88.0,3,2,2,9,44,46,3,3,20,0,53,4,0,11,6,139,121,63,1,24,24,2,12,1,4,6,4,4,2,3,35,42,1,5,28,0,1,7,18,26,1,2,34,20,101,20,76,76,14,59,1,13,4,0,60,15,1,11,38,383,136,5,0.0,0.06424058430982095,0.105819738998444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057943563560851875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300766130585765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374148418994883,0.0,0.04147734480035024,0.0612519754530851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04826635645868522,0.05068739489653598,0.0,0.0,0.16676408899929154,0.04527055465281017,0.23135956096660065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056899438117332536,0.04795225111937244,0.059193045754710676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055363605259042235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05735645502044062,0.046704820558322466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11911393111555775,0.06993346867781464,0.05589735192528485,0.0933973963899367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0474473644638277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045292971629241535,0.0,0.0,0.05602266419959088,0.0,0.17905551031224007,0.09808828035146584,0.045681799913846334,0.051808525797996975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193178229880778,0.0,0.15617607064898853,0.0,0.049555133804481566,0.04611860722960201,0.0,0.05944827506582165,0.16755769077197458,0.0,0.14163580574351473,0.0,0.061627752253889986,0.09095255794323637,0.08672768720642159,0.0,0.059728281017360135,0.10737056040334783,0.0,0.11543415107620468,0.04856952536073245,0.0,0.0,0.05763220353067475,0.0,0.0,0.10902544857527564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17412750718799935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04819228985035947,0.0,0.0564606881614142,0.20858120097231644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659288911184177,0.026488638000562538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05918638366837437,0.0,0.0,0.10260655412699952,0.07238313409613002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927988899149522,0.0,0.05474567873460725,0.0,0.12983113473399574,0.0,0.11957149006498205,0.08040532196458602,0.0,0.052364995293030174,0.05766246349606936,0.0,0.0,0.05202454037064092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08247190229847542,0.0,0.0,0.0602037224481068,0.0,0.05175811835231978,0.0,0.0,0.05664725799202459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753715801725385,0.0518802082856711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730055670123437,0.0,0.0,0.13893617902472633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05157463305555403,0.043117081543268584,0.054282622881734084,0.05487246732059824,0.08641095941057061,0.0,0.05656218472817134,0.0612519754530851,0.0,0.044850471888946766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045939536460531005,0.12522117911966232,0.0,0.060693670365541026,0.11512934577791747,0.0,0.0,0.09065893217739904,0.0,0.1133628277810171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220142870306677,0.0,0.04076589928338057,0.08715826901427766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18885712348040806,0.07204131621485367,0.10422393277425576,0.10653967707273697,0.04304378630474385,0.09484650917840276,0.0,0.1027864411020451,0.10361705159599396,0.060239243274098214,0.0,0.0,0.052964031300590936,0.0,0.06521871547128044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22385817118447307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048749343316594564,0.0,0.048924164974322434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03947203797015205,0.0,0.0,0.15406233267867492,0.059279905323855235,0.0,0.10474566953108744
mentalhealth,Kappacino525,2020/01/09,"I dont care about anything and its been ruining my life but I just dont care and I dont know how to start caring about things again. Hi im a 17M and I live in Canada, as the title say I dont care about almost anything, school, family, myself and just about everything else except for my friends and its been ruining my life, I no longer care to try at anything and I know thats its bad but I just dont care. 

My marks at school have been steadily been falling since grade 9 (Im in grd 12 now) and i couldnt care less I know its bad and I want to change but I just dont know how to make my self want to try and better myself. Last semester I failed 2 classes and this semester im most likley failing all my classes because I simply dont care.

I dont know what to do I dont know how to make myself care about anything. I know I just talked about my school but its more than that I just want to be able to care again",-0.13403361344537856,1.675279490196079,1.9073949579831968,98.68970588235298,84.98039215686275,5.0621848739495805,17.557422969187673,6.1826913282559595,-0.5016047619047623,712,16,177,6,21,237,83,204,0.261,0.662,0.077,-0.9913,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,3,18,18,0,0,2,0,17,2,0,5,1,40,40,18,0,4,11,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,10,10,0,0,7,0,0,1,11,6,0,0,4,1,29,12,23,34,4,10,0,4,0,0,5,4,0,2,5,112,39,8,0.05925464898577006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059334971642936385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950461091679602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895031366955273,0.03612108403995768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05240592174993956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6041406375633168,0.0,0.06268356174087532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6250140657515201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049499655837123686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05325425774658722,0.0,0.055860009535072835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04577999481889387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19201556716034626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279536380774336,0.04830044753605145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370662189361486,0.0,0.0,0.05232294064992917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791058766357832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04712167518094757,0.0,0.17990660468498698,0.0,0.0,0.06181552185091591,0.0,0.0,0.04901605796167613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041940745534132635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04762664232855096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03936615583405883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08046003416804977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484978162047373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,manifest_kindness,2020/01/09,"Moving forward after being judged by mental health Hi all. What are some tips for moving forward in a healthy way when someone has negatively judged you for your mental health. This situation was at work, but it was not warranted for the person to get in any trouble if i did come forward, but the words were very hurtful. Any tips are appreciated. I’ve let it built up and steal my inner peace. I’ve mediated, done yoga, and have prayed. The individual did say they didn’t mean to say it the way did and are sorry if it did hurt me. But I am still finding myself mad at this person and I can’t be since I have to work with them everyday. What they said was really not that big of deal and i don’t want to be petty, but my mind cannot then these negative thoughts off from this situation. Thanks in advance.",3.840185185185185,5.12770048765432,5.0441358024691345,82.94361111111114,71.90123456790123,7.8691358024691365,25.228395061728396,8.344100000000001,1.4535580246913575,637,19,131,10,12,211,101,162,0.139,0.75,0.111,-0.7263,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,3,3,2,6,1,0,5,0,24,2,0,0,1,23,31,13,0,3,8,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,11,7,0,0,3,1,0,7,8,5,0,0,12,3,14,1,19,15,2,23,1,2,0,0,12,12,0,3,8,93,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940291892039664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289010133706045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707756416692916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599206874159595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13038986858754056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453465536407107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032846394653656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054438028465978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14588087272372008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15540000798704515,0.0,0.0,0.2875381271510856,0.0,0.1440472723594098,0.0,0.0,0.3032528273344364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491327365185793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091392499294648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13570359133923174,0.2269000268866847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801092413073208,0.3207146182304855,0.0,0.0,0.12087647963366915,0.0,0.0,0.15969767601238324,0.0,0.0,0.11392952023277425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13134338298696904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325715841933938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771053569212855,0.08414534704532868,0.2264758424811668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20771829066659026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SirWigworth,2020/01/09,"Brother died of cancer and I was lied too. So my brother died in 2017 of brain cancer (aged 26) I was 21.

He was diagnosed with brain cancer New year's Eve 2013.
He had 1 round of radio therapy and 2 rounds of chemo. 

We were extremely close, closer than most brothers I'd say. We had a pretty poor start to life, I was a victim of emotional abuse/neglect and not being fed properly and  our mum was shagging pretty much everyone and my dad divorced her. we went into our grandparents care in 2002. We had a great upbringing there and when i was 11 in 2007 I moved in with our dad and he stayed with the grandparents. 

 while Josh was going through his therapy he moved in with me in my room. It was traumatic for me seeing my brother and best friends health declining so badly. He was fit, didn't smoke and was a complete health nut before. 

To cut a long story short my relatives (not my dad) made out to me he was getting better and things were going to be okay. After his first tumour was removed a second tumour emerged my relatives told me it was just scar tissue (THEY KNEW IT WASNT) it turns out, they knew it was terminal cancer from DAY 1!

 Because I thought he was getting better, i bailed on him a few times, cancelled plans with him, we argued and fought real bad sometimes and I said some nasty things to him. He always had social problems, he got teased at school, struggled to get a girlfriend and had depression. I on the other hand had NONE of these problems at all. I got pissed off having to share my room with him eventually and he ended up going from my house, mum's house and Nan's house. He didn't even have a home. 

They told me he was going to die 2 months before it happened.

If only they would have told me he was going to die earlier, these things never would have happened and the last part of his life would have been so much better. I'm now full of hate, and bitterness. I don't know how to deal with it. Even after 3 years I feel like crying ALL THE TIME. I have been diagnosed with  borderline personality disorder with schizotypal traits. My moods are all over the place. I am riddled with guilt. I hate my family now. All of them.

 I can't sleep without smoking weed, my performance at work is declining. I have 0 friends anymore apart from a top quality girlfriend. Most of the time i feel empty like a black void, I get pissed off and full of rage in a split second, I constantly lash out at people. I fantasize about suicide. (Not actually suicidal though) 
I'm never truley happy, I just put on an act for the sake of my dad and GF. My arms have scars on, my doors have holes in from being punched, my eyes are black, and i just hate everything and everyone. And I don't know what the fuck to do. 

I just feel so betrayed, I know they meant well by not telling me, but it has backfired real bad. I'm about to turn 24 in 3 weeks, and I have to live the rest of my life with this guilt.",3.237311036789297,4.7287110324786354,4.175252694165739,87.77915551839467,73.71794871794873,7.4117428465254545,24.341322928279446,8.04050195162591,1.2340486807878106,2274,68,474,34,46,734,273,585,0.159,0.7809999999999999,0.06,-0.9941,2,0,1,0,2,1,68.0,8,0,6,9,20,37,13,3,22,1,55,21,8,2,6,83,98,33,6,6,11,10,6,2,5,3,11,2,4,1,16,44,1,0,10,1,1,11,14,22,1,3,44,13,73,14,76,48,16,73,0,1,6,1,64,36,3,4,27,311,89,2,0.0,0.0,0.0675581666438521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05760462724073314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686572252188513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734116359144943,0.042201761281877116,0.0,0.11781869199825692,0.0,0.07265226239744979,0.1836840386906289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15456640376556416,0.0,0.0,0.07058425749051249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258598671376415,0.07481267369008948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604553634390931,0.044647406765838685,0.07137274485951943,0.05962740911226435,0.1405333056184417,0.2873978497004818,0.0,0.0793431939879684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787405518566573,0.06131693483034267,0.0,0.0,0.09145108176350476,0.0,0.0,0.13230382356111678,0.06221915904237248,0.0,0.06526356697918431,0.0,0.10501379638830866,0.04945768658420923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058886717772865214,0.0,0.0,0.1069733350580136,0.0640017098382012,0.144678570674567,0.0,0.19672407038896364,0.0,0.11073857487048733,0.07632595018115397,0.0,0.0,0.12243912843687195,0.07369626582534386,0.0,0.20504988488994486,0.0,0.14717579336441106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944299874282338,0.0,0.0,0.2396452157374367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414044028971435,0.056431417021410676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466968794856311,0.06764423489031629,0.0,0.061131062634539976,0.06126607508797685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550678302622909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05525845819778905,0.14716035580180858,0.10178353904000896,0.0,0.106788371205889,0.06686244195637417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05265227992102512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749689809277912,0.0,0.04799513295648908,0.06044867325757839,0.07233026525228442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14086291585260552,0.0,0.13248687967119868,0.0,0.06959493479297407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15759703038549466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585326494925255,0.05505420836729775,0.0,0.07006411708233025,0.05516707989423703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927966194183095,0.07057092527789417,0.0,0.0,0.06846990898742948,0.0,0.04900111328490165,0.0737896117025666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237387734022736,0.0,0.15145203439247987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060509778723335725,0.0,0.1583403109468752,0.0,0.13797933992703654,0.0,0.06801779446808115,0.05496062106524386,0.12110512335995086,0.0,0.0,0.19845573534167515,0.0,0.0,0.1506039916723138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055531861478717415,0.0,0.06224578307851016,0.06417659313526193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066734926695475,0.0,0.05040002071823672,0.0,0.0,0.14753630338475246,0.0,0.0,0.08916326908860386
mentalhealth,erin9415,2020/01/09,Scared to leave my room but need to reach out... I was on the streets a year ago and most my teen life thinking about getting a job but scared to reach out. Afraid of fucking up. Afraid to be around others or being to stupid. Odsp helps for now but im being re assessed might not get it again. And now im hearing voices and paranoid im being watched and that these people will do whatever they can to stop me from succeeding. I dont know what to do next. Yoga? Lol.,0.9975257731958748,3.092322412371136,2.061041237113404,97.56269587628869,82.6082474226804,4.704742268041239,20.009278350515466,5.6839178017228535,-0.28140742268041263,362,10,82,2,10,114,69,97,0.155,0.7190000000000001,0.126,-0.4767,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,1,5,7,2,4,3,1,11,2,0,0,0,18,18,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,1,0,5,7,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,3,6,1,16,11,1,14,0,0,1,1,3,7,1,3,7,54,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16504590474884334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657482771224516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21821290172698354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17212934587305306,0.1945528314401156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098492852840147,0.0,0.1247990083204403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6033503683279111,0.0,0.1847645138355174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232497107967363,0.0,0.0,0.19714797248691712,0.0,0.0,0.13151126728392554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975178121751862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805727803914267,0.0,0.0,0.19801482192447428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908047084641552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3728166731639092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15566289768554872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930281987789995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990004034988876
mentalhealth,Cet_Ceth,2020/01/09,"I need some help and advice I think I may or may not have anorexia. You see, this past couple of months, I’ve been eating less and less. I have been trying to motivate myself to eat more, but it isn’t working. Since usually I just start laying on my bed and not getting up for hours and it’s been affecting my health. But the thing is that I believe that usually, anorexia is on purpose, deliberately trying to eat less to lose weight. However, I don't have that mindset. Does anyone have any idea what is going on with me and if so maybe share some advice? I’m also thinking that it might be depression, but I’m not sure. And I apologize if the thing that I'm looking for is right in front of me,  but my family never talked about mental health so it's pretty new to me.",3.1586497890295355,4.429465898734178,4.556392405063292,85.84678270042195,73.55696202531647,7.545147679324894,23.926160337552748,8.07648339933343,1.2164666666666668,604,17,126,9,12,201,94,158,0.077,0.85,0.073,-0.1241,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,3,5,4,0,0,2,0,17,6,0,2,2,31,28,16,0,3,11,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,13,7,4,0,4,0,0,2,6,2,0,0,3,3,16,2,16,21,6,16,0,2,2,0,5,6,0,8,8,91,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671946322534961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093317548069568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297158434920884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559502261907303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15403214160251447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15127367991041815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177533109327769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196411137056468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4196838704985448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888369978666953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142847966895785,0.0,0.07769886692497091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906454802553721,0.0,0.0,0.09163786887641892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346377440580683,0.0,0.0,0.15433574969374922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480702714818798,0.15295025998323342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734962174976012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777759599839742,0.1450340961555727,0.0,0.0,0.10912542581850594,0.0,0.0,0.10137319929580052,0.1054438257994464,0.13204118767914533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305109144197271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908934646195925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675473728761625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894497025367647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11309290763891065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676830529103853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885323442638213,0.0,0.0,0.10988716118757544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816561025499464,0.17520421534899985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856424117154705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30114677015519503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664832854287785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953089357746796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MotardDave,2020/01/09,"Time to admit - i'm a disabled millenial. Hey there folks. I'm not coming here to moan either to find someone to tap me on my back. I just want to know others point of view, since i have noticed long time ago - my own gets adjusted to the proper or ""mainstream"" thinking when most people agree on the same thing. So please help me with your opinion folks.

So why i say i'm a ""disabled millenial""? Well i'm almost 25, doing quite well with work, fixed my social life (i was an antisocial pothead, which made me lazy and made matters worse, as of now half a year passed since i smoked for the last time) and in general i do quite well with my life goals, whatever i really want i always work hard to get it either material or not - in fact i owe a lot to my parents, they taught me most of the good life rules. BUT. There is a big but.

I get to the point in my life when i am thinking of having my own family, but... it's sad to say i'm single for most of my life, i can total the time of all relationships at around a month (i'm serious). They always ended as in the country i grew up i was a ""tanned foreigner"" (i'm from one country but i grew up somewhere else, where ""latinos"" are called by n-word, i know tell me about it) and racism was a big thing, then gossiping and in the end me trying multiple times and hearing then what they said and thought of me made me literally deny all actions in that case. And in the end the last girl i got into the relationship with (actually in third country now, but it was already more than 5 years ago) everything was fine and i could be a well-doing thing till today, but i was a smoker at the time and i was being a really silent/closed up person because ""i don't know what she will think/say"" and it all ruined it few weeks later. 

That's why i say i'm disabled as i found out, finding out a partner in 21st century is actually treated as disability. Haha more reasons to make me smile about the whole thing, i am not sarcastic, i seriously laugh at this, but sometimes it gets me in a depression state, but just sometimes.

 So in general even though i show a lot of interest, i always fear to make a move. I admit, i am scared of rejection it makes me fear to make a move. So my time is passing, and i am also scared i might go down the old route of ""i don't give a damn, because i'm on my own"". So what can i do to possibly change this?",3.736725708502021,4.064245331983805,5.192568319838057,85.33030996963566,71.38866396761134,8.361234817813765,26.77353238866397,8.376592526197632,1.5465346153846151,1830,56,406,27,32,618,226,494,0.11599999999999999,0.802,0.081,-0.9821,2,0,2,0,0,0,71.0,0,1,3,5,25,21,1,4,32,1,29,5,0,8,5,77,68,37,0,3,17,1,1,0,1,2,5,5,0,3,21,20,0,0,13,1,1,9,5,12,3,3,15,7,59,9,65,48,20,70,0,4,1,0,25,30,1,10,30,277,80,4,0.0,0.0,0.1389665384560012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623325916666372,0.0,0.07129891627737553,0.0,0.07857361658247745,0.05694053183246167,0.17773829673828415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633852298676107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054750248881592925,0.0,0.08680864169990987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270560910575194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07532269581968226,0.061334561052869274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05684932088792095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061326520930576923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948046690791892,0.0,0.18919257149972613,0.0,0.0,0.047028512251255344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399212402656833,0.0,0.06712328383776503,0.16024498604260262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301554033814813,0.0,0.0,0.0780697541051289,0.0,0.0,0.1488012564150609,0.06830382804635485,0.040465963555594515,0.05972119313806041,0.05694706202000956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378336289348813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025027720471757,0.0,0.047725466393819034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173929272572181,0.11607891500332992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514617965173186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301188148462265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106746485308635,0.0,0.2021202913305775,0.19011261383065128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553449209262318,0.0,0.0,0.05683307464991129,0.15135376120802313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106440187360668,0.0747149390065028,0.0,0.04824858751276352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790618365719299,0.0,0.0,0.04936277744820792,0.06217118739432194,0.0,0.07815885115576347,0.13461856122604213,0.08027000521412381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514650291705134,0.0,0.0,0.0912281586030627,0.07320792372796033,0.0,0.1528894570654404,0.0,0.0,0.06772978553627115,0.2264920184874499,0.14257204320449193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177987185664249,0.0,0.0,0.07258187787426082,0.060329560634118776,0.0,0.14084198421992555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06223403408983549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18921483713619092,0.13687086453806382,0.06995599436904752,0.05652675050444076,0.2906308354482664,0.0,0.06749154767983735,0.0,0.0,0.04834175428906176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399403807978073,0.0,0.0571142686893634,0.0,0.2560780269098928,0.0,0.12849817846237355,0.07949493441046704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036723872962214,0.0,0.07256132639576186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170401950059302
mentalhealth,IndyNative13,2020/01/09,"Looking for answers...Brain Fog...Jogged Memory...Not Feeling Myself Hey ya'll. 

Was hoping anyone with any type of input could share. 

I've been struggling with intense cognitive brain fog for about a year now. Some other symptoms include:

\- Declining memory/recall

\- Lack of concentration...finding it tough to stay on certain tasks

\- Struggle to feel present in conversations

\- Lack of excitement...not enjoying things as I used to because of being afraid of how I'm going to feel.   
  Not feeling present during these things..always in my own mind

\- Lack of comprehending/retaining things I've read

\- Lack of clarity

\- Lack of emotion

**A little background:**

I  accepted a job in Oct of 2018 & moved to Colorado in December of 2018 from the Midwest. Something I've always wanted to do and feel like I should be thriving because I finally accomplished it; but the brain fog and other symptoms make it nearly impossible to enjoy myself. I used to be one of the most outgoing people I knew & loved life, but I'm just not feeling myself anymore. Struggle to put myself into social settings because of being in my own mind thinking about how I'm feeling. Always analyzing myself.

Work is going great...although the brain fog definitely impacts my ability at work. But overall the job is going well. I do stare at a computer screen nearly all day, but I did it quite often at my prior place of employment. & I'm making good money which allowed me to move out here. 

Used to be a cannabis user, now it makes these symptoms 100x worse. Drinking alcohol makes it worse. Working out, which I do roughly 4 times a week, makes it worse. & all of these things stink because they were part of who I was/am.

I got a primary care doc after moving out here. I've seen him 3 times now. At first he thought it was anxiety because of the move & also had a tragic family death right before moving out here. However, when I think back, these symptoms started in November of 2018; before the family tragedy & before moving out here, but after accepting the job. I pretty much just ignored them because of how stoked I was to be moving...but they are no long ignore-able & are impacting my daily life. 

After I told the doc I didn't feel like it was anxiety, he said it could be minor ADHD & prescribed me a super low dose of ritalin. Symptoms have still been there, if not worse. I definitely have symptoms of depression, but I cannot tell if the symptoms are a result of the brain fog/cognitive problems I am having or if they are causing them. It's like which came first...the chicken or the egg. I really have no reason to be depressed other than having these issues, which is the part that kills me. As I said, I'm finally doing something I've wanted to do my entire life. Have a great job with a lot of opportunity. Should be thriving...but these things are just limiting me in every aspect of my life.

I eat healthy, workout, & am overall an intelligent individual. But these things are starting to make me feel like I'm not intelligent & have a lack of social skills, which is not my personality at all. I've always been outgoing & have LOVED meeting new people. But these things are dragging me down.

I've got my first appointment with a counselor tomorrow...but I'm worried he will just assume I'm depressed & want to get me on depression meds. I'm not dead opposed, anything that will make this better, but I'm just afraid that's not the case & that its a cognitive issue. Thinking about seeing a neurologist.

Sorry for typing a book....I just was talking to my mother earlier today & she suggested making a post on here to see what input I get back. I'm super open minded and will seriously take any suggestions/considerations to heart. Willing to try anything and everything to get back to being myself; An outgoing, personable, excited, happy person.

Thanks, all.",3.918924301146205,6.361178604972378,5.036759297435477,78.19815576812074,74.41436464088397,7.582056567988786,28.07116351941948,8.489948576735458,2.4038162200049484,3066,125,519,59,67,1007,305,724,0.132,0.7020000000000001,0.165,0.9864,7,1,4,0,0,0,156.0,0,0,5,13,29,41,1,5,34,0,57,24,5,18,5,108,120,25,3,18,27,1,10,4,0,6,14,2,0,3,41,16,4,3,18,3,1,11,11,17,1,3,21,19,53,24,87,81,18,71,0,6,6,2,29,29,0,11,32,346,94,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046217500524849096,0.0,0.0,0.04109853500614373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030753822666626494,0.12799627688856485,0.5833497147744715,0.0,0.0523037725528017,0.0,0.058838566442288937,0.0,0.03813872960581632,0.02688983066840937,0.0,0.06329320268280969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887125246746425,0.0,0.14065714633426152,0.0,0.0981715010104727,0.0,0.0,0.03401184100772881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214652072690366,0.0,0.04398423922702016,0.03920918595642322,0.03950564171809464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06140911849750391,0.0,0.0,0.0248014010006288,0.0,0.13249085589923498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037672942005231434,0.0,0.03935082218990239,0.0,0.04325863045829941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032401442671560546,0.0,0.03456241750892634,0.0,0.0725071403977091,0.0,0.17500384435435662,0.08242045886147117,0.0,0.08425490738162593,0.03514874260811997,0.09813379142636866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06027614212260195,0.0,0.06556751546778393,0.03225566962759185,0.061514699297217285,0.08479733244642597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040937890313974094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045571394770947564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038196197185722376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027764229521774,0.15264943049454546,0.0,0.042546659490307864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865246598369327,0.07515203755032447,0.0385437333456709,0.0,0.03403298435586095,0.03229395668286927,0.0,0.0,0.03269452554241173,0.06941737703122848,0.0,0.20536125758851825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0427167431070618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164909640850682,0.0,0.0,0.24524042447377556,0.02827011185928392,0.0,0.0,0.037141736888291435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026059266686315204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328975379691192,0.0,0.053322090789073864,0.10073676573961432,0.040179084138349634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03683090443852615,0.039124306597481666,0.0,0.03679788444691465,0.0,0.038659622371031564,0.0,0.04090345222811732,0.03846712390345453,0.0,0.02463635763129624,0.039539910002001036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032841826168177816,0.07316228867548588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061290048833813726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840355996405368,0.0,0.05921171909692575,0.0,0.04304914614976889,0.05443972441355547,0.04098974346067304,0.03071158384855545,0.0,0.0,0.12060993127547324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797987762180772,0.028914665163723218,0.030910052385683118,0.03361286567991729,0.03540577816281222,0.0,0.0,0.15329360369260508,0.07392453426000066,0.0,0.030530337616958208,0.04484884185149587,0.0,0.03645247106137102,0.03674704109093243,0.0,0.02610958645721456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964276814728244,0.0,0.0,0.06804830414369634,0.0,0.03084765867967136,0.0,0.034577207021785815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399084391365375,0.039054662816177865,0.15676272016541085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02476486487548293
mentalhealth,cs1608,2020/01/09,"3 day long panic attack... First of all fuck this. I am on day 3 of (almost) a constant panic attack. Very miserable its like my personal hell. I feel dizzy, nauseous, tight chest, fatigue, and overall just nervous. Does anyone have any tips to calm me down- ive tried taking the panic attack medicine my doctor prescribed but NOTHING is helping. Jesus.",2.8818750000000013,5.857643437500003,3.570625000000004,83.711875,83.375,4.45,25.1875,5.985473137389443,1.099475,276,11,43,2,8,87,54,64,0.342,0.609,0.049,-0.9446,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,1,13,5,5,2,0,4,4,1,0,1,7,7,2,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,11,0,1,0,2,6,2,5,7,1,7,2,2,0,1,2,2,2,1,6,23,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388904042574026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129929569058468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144398986368234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5585851395699359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17686607918538064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21110358421837286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167520295262626,0.14322625331477382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275504452856038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392152208291205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130767184093552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970266168878476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995951764874598,0.0,0.0,0.1448403051704197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704307461356895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5760845196765361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14290786979910264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230573517274556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111927272652332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504256521036392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nasty_Saok,2020/01/09,"I think my friend has schizophrenia My friend started talking to him self at classes
Hes like having conversations with him self and sometimes he waves hes head like he agrees .
He always had stress especially at school shows and stuff, he is depressive like once we were chilling at a height place and he was like if I jump from here I'll die. 

I read those are symptoms so I added them

What does he have?
Does he have schizophrenic symptoms?",1.5104072398190065,4.231107352941181,1.5364705882352934,95.69257918552036,93.11764705882356,4.497737556561086,20.65610859728507,6.297961479604792,0.2284660633484168,355,12,71,4,13,105,58,85,0.11,0.695,0.195,0.7998,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,1,0,2,8,0,1,1,0,11,4,1,0,0,7,13,5,1,1,1,0,0,4,2,0,3,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,3,0,12,6,6,10,0,7,0,1,0,0,19,5,0,1,5,37,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14964462875032591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15489938790262772,0.0,0.18664969544173726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147654216121894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27789408208549554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457184595189027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35145080880250457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19152800812249446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18789871941809905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798926848672898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820117461343586,0.0,0.0,0.3752330635106706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787033094013788,0.0,0.12729452054654847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20601071329677625,0.0,0.205878371614046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738535884214156,0.0,0.1445518081103473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523678400437247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,natalie_is_a_bumpkin,2020/01/09,"Tips for Insomnia As my seasonal depression flare ups have been occurring lately, I have also been struggling with insomnia. I am not sure how to go about it because nobody in my family really struggles with it. Any tips would be greatly appreciated!",5.800227272727272,8.636937659090915,7.204545454545452,63.00181818181821,70.13636363636364,11.672727272727276,33.72727272727273,11.20814326018867,5.274881818181818,203,10,29,8,4,69,36,44,0.221,0.71,0.069,-0.7878,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,7,2,0,1,1,6,8,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,0,4,2,8,4,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299925976519741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955769961805605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753175142616033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477083616865784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27112248368529035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16344898396848956,0.0,0.0,0.31707861124652303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3244238903776063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18424310856333628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6013212665705341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710583961074108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043018836741314,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LSDTHCShrooms,2020/01/09,Lost my therapist today. I went to see my therapist today. I have sexual abuse trauma that I have yet to work through with her because it took forever for me to trust her. I'm also an addict. I get addicted to things very easily and I use a lot of alcohol and marijuana to cope. I know its unhealthy but I dont really care about myself so why does it matter? Today my therapist told me she can no longer help me to begin working through the trauma because I'm too much of an addict and she cant in good conscience help me work through something that will make me feel really bad and cause me to go use to cope. She wants to refer me to a trauma specialist now. I'm panicking because I'm scared to try a new therapist. I know it will take me too long to trust again. I guess I'm just lost in life and floundering.,2.0400197238658784,3.839997420118344,4.16494674556213,85.26915581854044,77.75739644970416,8.056962524654834,23.69270216962525,8.841846274778883,1.7451180276134122,640,21,134,15,15,220,93,169,0.218,0.693,0.08800000000000001,-0.9766,0,0,2,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,5,9,11,0,1,6,0,7,5,0,4,0,20,31,8,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,7,6,1,0,4,0,0,3,3,7,0,0,5,2,26,4,22,24,2,14,0,2,1,0,8,2,0,2,9,85,33,3,0.0,0.12910750468561016,0.0,0.3563687638175305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645206817942913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714048453105917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098249042645032,0.199274932700068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110986266438634,0.11193862949469942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535733361779196,0.0,0.12770794675696825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055096745233725736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056930507871751836,0.0,0.06192818292646146,0.0913959448453322,0.0,0.0,0.12003890382007887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607591928592553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977029639522326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696627370479697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09643193885051407,0.0,0.0,0.2378996514083937,0.09263943634462556,0.0,0.0,0.07273599644895028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801029280772487,0.0,0.0,0.10524054143952244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396134824827033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909449319842628,0.0,0.08683220636026161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388774865412643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192925997308442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5060741008013121,0.07239251223112565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30986255189238804,0.10412217695530628,0.12106581013895393,0.07398111250918626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882241695174744,0.0,0.08990878868461473,0.06427127513954499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101305324304014,0.0983253332223544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379867671784036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BoyMeetsWorldBoy,2020/01/09,"when it isnt meamt for you to live life anymore i dunno what to do. i mean, i dont want to kill myself, but what if life is pushing me to that point. idk",-1.7533333333333303,-0.14209299999999914,1.0311111111111124,103.70000000000002,90.11111111111113,3.6,14.555555555555555,3.1291,-1.5563111111111108,116,2,32,0,4,40,26,36,0.08199999999999999,0.846,0.07200000000000001,0.1675,0,0,0,0,0,2,4.0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,5,6,3,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,5,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,22,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33460680468774834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3954263480866601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732793915615497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4766264482326052,0.0,0.0,0.29792741361318104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675238510643266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189488800684131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19900527931646908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,newyorkbro992,2020/01/09,"Why is my mom doing this to me I have adhd Stop causing problems with me

Stop Cause a problem with me

All the time my mom want to starts problems with me I feel like she hate me we have been having arguments now for six weeks every time when her mom comes she always have to start a problem with me I think she wants to show off that she is tough. I don’t know  why’ mom is doing this shit to me She wants to blame everything on me on me she wants to blame my pass look everybody makes mistakes in this life nobody is perfect she wants to blame all the plow bomb on me she keep on telling me you made my life into hell I have A disability and it’s not my fault I was born like this I don’t know what to do to be honest and my mom she’s keep on telling me I’m going to kick you out of the house how was she going to do that I am a 27-year-old guy have a learning disability I don’t have a license I can’t drive I only work two days a job I don’t have it   My mom want to blame me for everything why did god made me   Disabled all she want to do is blaming for everything",0.22891304347826136,1.919399542016812,2.1792656192911966,97.8689313116551,82.99159663865547,5.315601023017903,19.171355498721226,6.280692351149826,-0.289129192546584,833,21,208,7,23,277,106,238,0.19899999999999998,0.721,0.08,-0.9837,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,2,0,2,3,14,3,0,10,0,29,3,1,6,4,42,53,4,0,12,1,6,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,9,10,0,4,5,1,0,5,6,10,0,2,6,2,48,4,31,46,3,25,1,0,1,0,24,9,2,0,13,138,57,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026090659381892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104223652272222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17541567371446193,0.0,0.07354651991097984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05506244521520025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193555968677015,0.0,0.2301996432228023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04317022965296232,0.06099483386115113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704580071236332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453871532058313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429416824700109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851599841571508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472556553886132,0.15177770357169654,0.0,0.0,0.09384422217775916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206115423796389,0.08342381445145981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169692633845386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16157550518098912,0.056991200794492027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5999696997668948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959098516336966,0.0,0.0,0.06493463985068637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32678500643445685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876404016346254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086350859679253,0.0,0.0,0.14276147260146407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925016332580615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05470746884617903,0.0,0.0,0.09957045964260493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340295789704201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3525115662032152,0.0,0.06848595029061208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23112402726730266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215698918859115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05498133010443819
mentalhealth,everyday_usernamelol,2020/01/09,"This is on a throwaway account. what do I have? My friend and I have been trying to find out what I'm suffering form.  
I am persistent with depressing thoughts and feeling depressed, anxiety always on the high barely leaving my house besides school, I used to self-harm a lot but I've been clean for over 5 months, It doesn't matter if I do it or not, at times I want to go back to it, My stutter has become 1million times worse over the course of the last 2 months.

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My friend and I have read over 20+ wiki articles about mental health and mental disorders and we are stuck, As I don't want to get a therapist or counselor for many reasons which I don't want to name, We looked at things like antisocial behavior disorder, chronic depression, severe anxiety, addictive personality disorder, Borderline personality disorder and so on, If someone knows or has an idea on what this may be please inform me. Thanks :)",8.074222222222222,7.372938657142857,8.108761904761906,71.55946031746029,62.42857142857143,11.89206349206349,37.73015873015873,11.20814326018867,4.234168253968253,735,32,134,18,9,239,113,175,0.21600000000000005,0.657,0.128,-0.9102,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,2,0,0,1,3,9,0,0,7,0,17,3,0,2,0,32,30,14,0,5,7,0,1,1,2,1,3,0,1,2,10,10,0,0,7,1,1,1,4,5,0,0,4,2,16,4,22,24,2,18,0,4,1,0,8,11,0,7,7,89,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296697860786655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385736056354957,0.12221709176721678,0.13706248369966564,0.0,0.0,0.17258103688200802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673505841777683,0.0,0.0,0.12457704457350666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29145946278579804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5171072619059711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05703429408297665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030957552366257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17429563144756835,0.0,0.058932543373962636,0.0,0.06410596818503454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989949562821085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917777335300113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301542861988087,0.0,0.12733573926161404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06199108747742371,0.09194580554017244,0.0,0.11943728964181385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055107633260201384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472230318219524,0.0,0.0,0.09589722285312717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435994102442185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22734864831974164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006932025031222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196982540927298,0.0,0.12381884392018926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282899177427005,0.0,0.0,0.115975610538705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415807053279578,0.0,0.0,0.11767340141571772,0.12743016079799144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557377496558443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384967337614803,0.0,0.13096771402030147,0.07493828926700656,0.0,0.0,0.08954938301327263,0.13154738630962556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658275474413871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742165886790397,0.0,0.0,0.19959437486805806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149512744210318,0.0,0.0,0.13706248369966564,0.0
mentalhealth,crohnie927,2020/01/09,"Multiple surgeries and mental health I’m feeling really alone. In the past year and a half I’ve been hospitalized five times, received four surgeries and a sudden, life-altering chronic illness diagnosis. I’ve lost so much. How do I bounce back mentally? My fourth surgery was earlier this week and it’s becoming more and more clear to me how no one can fully comprehend what is going on with me.",4.223281853281854,6.8267819459459504,5.116640926640926,77.20770270270273,74.13513513513513,9.093436293436293,30.841698841698843,9.606745405546679,3.4445698841698835,320,15,55,9,7,104,61,74,0.128,0.809,0.063,-0.5908,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,3,0,5,3,0,2,1,10,9,8,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,4,3,1,4,0,4,6,3,10,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,6,36,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27616667706516024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20503567899314545,0.0,0.0,0.2944915168910885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13482512638512376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515420748438396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28343411471118946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883412084619716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29107754398239805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5374364798589695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19601679474929715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18068743253632213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545454720727207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082139190751672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554844613227334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138887603277661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717124240418402
mentalhealth,blondie--,2020/01/09,"Finally coming clean about auditory hallucinations I've been dealing with them and done pretty nasty confusion/paranoia recently, and I finally told my bf and mother. I don't know what to do from here, but I'll call my GP tomorrow and hope for the best.",10.685624999999996,8.078256312500002,10.978333333333332,59.100000000000016,58.79166666666666,15.433333333333335,42.75,13.816669648895859,5.93905,205,9,36,7,2,70,39,48,0.043,0.6990000000000001,0.257,0.9062,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,9,8,5,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,5,2,5,5,1,5,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803969717341339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728284807823191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23015851620423144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27545875190343283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734257483195565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5853820570566899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26537764001147285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468393539008821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718259124446559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638155868251641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255309265336013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Penn_Anthony,2020/01/09,"How Do I Stop Worrying So Much? I'm a huge worrywart. I worry about everything from whether or not I locked my car doors to if I turned off the stove. I think this comes from when I was a kid and I would often forget things or find some way to mess it up, now I double check everything I do. I even worry about things that I don't have any control over. It's gotten to a point where I develop bad habits like having to go outside and lock my car doors even if I remember for a fact that I locked it.",2.2411111111111133,3.131454777777776,3.7694444444444457,92.08250000000002,75.2962962962963,7.622222222222224,21.833333333333336,8.07648339933343,0.7221999999999995,388,9,93,6,8,129,70,108,0.205,0.746,0.049,-0.9329,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,10,3,0,0,5,0,7,0,0,2,1,20,13,10,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,8,3,0,2,3,0,1,4,2,2,0,0,2,0,16,1,12,10,3,14,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,6,4,67,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315451434811368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615134729844849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16663055779511135,0.0,0.0,0.21695827074789212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555292511817629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34770097439352915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17679972835225313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993583329263797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450451736036072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14219991175600544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18286236635275785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21912866195434128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617236535462643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570245332638579,0.12394789121812085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104060688780636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15354286288790722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5893400387410116,0.0,0.13741350530084165,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamnoodlelie,2020/01/09,"how can i learn when i have PTSD? I’m in drumline, so I play music, and I have PTSD. Really bad PTSD. Recently it’s made me slow and made me hard to concentrate. I don’t want to let down everyone, we perform in a month and a half and I keep forgetting my music at practices, my mind randomly goes blank, and now I learn music so much slower than I used to years ago. 
I don’t know what to do, please, I need advice.",1.7032102728731928,2.8149466404494383,3.820256821829858,90.31876404494385,76.97752808988764,7.782343499197433,21.703049759229536,8.418075326091056,0.9655476725521664,317,8,75,6,7,109,57,89,0.065,0.851,0.084,0.1339,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,4,0,19,15,9,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,1,15,1,9,12,1,11,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,7,47,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814093470168936,0.16456236705902325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15500513840326935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773909724185227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663007236924609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16500907964381964,0.0,0.0,0.10202518793629864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898337548479188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3513220291978648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874477035750645,0.0,0.1481794156844751,0.0,0.1364698349641064,0.137652809370941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20378156498082356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6510243461722682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892841729084205,0.0,0.18330123438523646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16033696874060632,0.0,0.0,0.1094977489807591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954876723827568
mentalhealth,ImNotThis,2020/01/09,"I'm stuck I'm not sure if I hate the career path I chose (developer), my workplace, or the constant panic attacks a project I'm working on is giving me. 

The project is not recent, it's the fourth year with it (bug fixes and a couple of features the last two), but last year I fcked up (thanks back up!) and since then I'm terrified of it, and recently developed into panic attacks.

I already tried to quit around October but the boss refused to accept it when I told him it was because of this project. And I'm glad he didn't because I wouldn't be able to find another job, at least not psychologically (maybe this is why I never switched jobs). I don't think I'm good at my job (I'm mediocre and so is this place), and I don't think I can find other kind of job in any field not even a cashier (I don't have a pretty face, meaning people thought I hated them until we actually talked). And I can't be fooling around as I have to help paying the bills (I live with my parents and they/we are struggling financially).

As always, I'm just venting. And I'll be doing so with something along these lines from time to time, hopefully therapy will kick in soon.",3.466411020104246,4.455068751054854,4.783767684288907,85.59609828741624,72.45991561181435,7.433010672623483,28.28716803176967,7.724431198458867,1.5794246214941672,902,34,191,11,17,300,137,237,0.163,0.7509999999999999,0.086,-0.9635,5,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,1,3,9,15,4,3,11,0,20,1,1,1,2,39,39,20,0,3,9,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,10,17,0,1,7,0,2,0,11,8,0,1,5,0,22,7,27,29,1,26,0,0,0,0,10,11,0,3,15,118,32,11,0.11080593903767524,0.0,0.10813061255190294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222771090922966,0.0,0.09219941775805043,0.0,0.0,0.07535183824317389,0.11618968842880552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19728155593363814,0.0,0.25211550424018925,0.0,0.08520292747754088,0.0,0.13509254394764786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974185556871042,0.0,0.0,0.12260466398254395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318627769868451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025492417231872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10629515347150463,0.0,0.09293876451263226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187958491505791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427088524800272,0.0,0.0,0.11005529931659797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4398311874320608,0.0,0.0,0.11538733423044,0.0,0.18064325877476445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784367422917754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131945909381624,0.12070015148615985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546037115531742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600137899748634,0.1230368823025402,0.0,0.0,0.07681888635986933,0.0,0.11576862245243995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272947545547027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785575553920108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21881499414323044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165981780894447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530382535958783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583842603087033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044332862085848,0.0,0.0,0.08906161654411154,0.0,0.10201522141847937,0.1267162481229238,0.0,0.0,0.14199994317524375,0.0,0.08796753845241675,0.12922366826125167,0.0,0.0,0.1058798232346964,0.0,0.07522995911371633,0.0,0.10824130170714692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999851252201941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806680433117922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271078364969605
mentalhealth,uninhibitedcatalysis,2020/01/09,"Is this far too little social interaction? Disregarding work/school (PhD Student), I spend most days having nothing more than passing interactions with cashiers and strangers. It's not uncommon to have a Saturday or Sunday where I don't utter a single word. Sometimes I play a video game online with a friend and we chat. When opportune, I engage in friendly conversations with peers. People do seem to like me and it's rather evident that many of the opposite gender find me attractive. Despite these things, I rarely interact socially and feel lonely. So my questions are: 1) how outlandish is this? 2) is there anything in the literature that speaks of an empirically determined healthy quantity of social interaction per day? I am trying to gauge where I am at so that I may know how much effort I should put into ameliorating this semi-voluntary withdrawal.",6.602527593818983,8.988658165562919,6.900281456953643,68.00331401766005,66.68211920529801,10.331346578366448,33.77538631346579,10.504223727775694,4.24495982339956,697,32,106,20,12,225,113,151,0.027000000000000003,0.8,0.172,0.9633,0,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,2,10,8,0,0,7,0,12,0,0,2,0,24,15,10,0,2,3,0,1,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,10,9,0,1,5,4,1,2,2,1,0,0,0,2,13,7,14,13,4,15,0,1,0,0,15,8,0,5,6,76,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16072229969171026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519157214637187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875387395416883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17850848128383145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017898107705852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10733647426442999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541789473142302,0.19575048186660304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980122202424658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435742606780758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187403826366273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354023606442927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19633904271912744,0.21879028046297144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19766268504779674,0.0,0.1778015735210182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5972774292015123,0.0,0.0,0.19316515527527794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12975432573687035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13260168869738015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218695441384022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rampitup55,2020/01/09,"Am I somewhere on the spectrum? Hi all. I'm hoping someone here knows more about this than I do. I'll just start off by saying that maybe I'm just an introvert. But I really loathe some of these things. I loathe them and think about them negatively to the point that it made me want to ask here. I hate crowds, I won't go to concerts. If there's a large crowd I'm getting out of it immediately. I don't like people I don't know standing too close to me, and I really don't like them to walk up and talk to me. Unless the conversation just somehow happens organically. I'm getting better about that through force of will though. Not as bad as I used to be. But I'd just really rather not. Not talk to most people

I enjoy spending time with my friends and to some degree, my family. And I'll spend time with them. But people I don't know... I just don't really like them talking to me much. I am married but even still, I prefer to spend most of my time alone, sitting in front of my computer. I work as a truck driver, so that my contact with random people that I don't care to associate with, is as limited as it can be. I'm even building a website that I intend to monetize, so that I can eventually quit working and stay home in my house away from the world and away from people, as much as possible. I really don't care what it takes, I'll learn everything there is to know about marketing if that's what I have to do. But I'm going to get out of this job and I'm going to work at home. 

Another thing is, I really dislike disorder. Like a lot. I want everything as orderly as possible. The house doesn't have to be spotless, don't get me wrong. But if there's stuff out and about, it's going to be orderly. I even order everything on the table if we go out to eat at a restaurant. I don't know if this next part has any bearing on anything, but I'm smart. I'm not some kind of braggart, I'm simply explaining this. I've taken a ton of tests over the years in an effort to remedy my social situation and my social anxiety. And most of the time I come out as being smarter than 98 out of 100 in a room full of people. With only 99 and 100 being smarter than me. I know there's no way to say that without it sounding like I'm tooting my own horn. But I said it because it's well known that a lot of ""eccentrics"" are that way. They're extremely talented in something or another, and they're also kind of weird as I am. I also feel that I don't have much in common with most people. A little here and there, sure. 

But by and large, I really do need to at least go to the local college and talk to the professors to feel like I'm in like minded company. I know the way this all sounds and I really can't stand people who talk like this but given what I'm trying to do here, I have to. So hopefully someone can take an objective look and tell me... I don't know. Something, anything. To get over myself, that I really do have condition x, whatever. But it's as though my wife is some kind of a social butterfly and I just can't wait to get away from people and back to my computer. I'm aware that it's a problem so I make it a point to go against it as much as I can tolerate, but even then I'm still just tolerating it. I don't like it, and I really don't want anything to do with it. Social situations, I mean. Other than with my little tight knit social circle. Anyway I've rambled on long enough about this, thanks for reading and I look forward to reading your reply.",2.383306729939605,3.6073412090163934,4.377983894161634,86.54780414150129,75.4344262295082,7.814437733678459,23.907679033649696,8.425802102053193,1.3447,2703,81,595,49,57,928,264,732,0.079,0.846,0.07400000000000001,-0.1484,1,1,2,0,0,0,82.0,1,1,5,7,42,29,1,0,26,0,48,1,0,4,3,117,114,64,0,14,32,1,3,9,1,2,0,6,3,0,45,39,1,3,16,3,3,11,24,5,1,0,4,11,71,24,117,102,23,70,0,0,2,0,31,37,0,20,23,413,116,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05460954098630856,0.0,0.08433194360734718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03585634577194361,0.11057826167406223,0.040336210565889284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017013016321902,0.0,0.0492928716489536,0.0,0.14861699297140787,0.04054400927230595,0.044025060757865365,0.032142049085558705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04663297777544994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751791394555064,0.0,0.0,0.045419866810439184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060430009513879036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05395315167474783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448135579782155,0.0,0.13930343519725571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421635877216995,0.0,0.04970656933800572,0.0,0.05332097517019002,0.03766836600088752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04073695127692612,0.0,0.1652869067190114,0.0,0.20976282383872147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0466265430241768,0.0,0.0,0.0520572543651241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057794843836878,0.10474013529957032,0.0,0.12168036046179262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05232367088030922,0.0,0.0,0.16472198623147533,0.23182019094321546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318388885844873,0.10569313552201416,0.0,0.04666196701138458,0.08855523956679512,0.0,0.0,0.08965366400787941,0.0,0.049891809524316766,0.035195856344881635,0.0,0.052971620991279514,0.05743544507098713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05323950305018076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15504241569797972,0.03909659614173613,0.0,0.0,0.05607604055951329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04010145819233664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05709848574282534,0.0,0.32898999597347944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09968860975183833,0.11888412937547894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050452868082224815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608193270865657,0.1054830600712055,0.0,0.3377843374097882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050155699908007015,0.08386166899001765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11853530175091925,0.0,0.2687440139221693,0.08935127476895192,0.08118404352371479,0.0,0.0,0.03732062692669391,0.056200244949651486,0.08421611795333916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036009929016065,0.0,0.0,0.049694819764195854,0.0,0.07928867700269902,0.2119008767581864,0.046085950415462006,0.048544178064743516,0.0,0.0,0.0700592989805272,0.03378550000105095,0.10360853301273708,0.0,0.1229827603181034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03579834930748961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045539424455546096,0.0,0.0,0.09329971447499574,0.12555733727970886,0.0,0.0,0.047408140189108286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05082719830672695,0.0,0.11515822259302765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05764898295632499,0.0,0.033954627539508585
mentalhealth,Alaa1803,2020/01/09,"I just want to get the fuck out of here. Someone once told me that I should stop talking or making conversations with people who make me uncomfortable or make my symptoms worse.  So, I stopped taking to my family. The worst part is that I'm still living with them... and I want to get out. It suffocate me! I'm broke and I don't have a stable job that will make me leave their house. Also, I'm so scared and terrified of change and I don't want to look for a job outside my hometown. 
I hate it here and I can't move elsewhere. I'm even struggling paying my own phone bill. It's so sad and I know that sometimes I'm better than most days but sometimes it hit me so hard i can't even function.. 

Please help me",0.15801640566741426,2.407965879194631,1.814172259507832,96.79949850857572,88.19463087248323,4.653392990305743,18.34489187173752,6.139981653823899,-0.3011568978374348,552,15,126,5,18,179,86,149,0.223,0.716,0.06,-0.9591,2,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,2,1,11,8,2,2,4,0,8,2,0,4,0,26,29,14,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,9,10,0,2,1,0,2,1,4,7,0,0,1,2,22,1,12,25,4,7,0,2,1,1,8,2,1,3,4,79,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575653826315005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128019629224298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15312632741803658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933517876795359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191212045363016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364574359223826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338190605174063,0.15125182165926854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12966758563226513,0.14291067652485664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702288684267732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16702208794393594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28728411803364634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955082515361109,0.0,0.0,0.15326937035226865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12781691912396534,0.0,0.1215535601200476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38648704795990735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384636292209675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541540465922956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675016528568309,0.0,0.10035143776443027,0.0,0.0,0.15889205374892687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492002132167967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264622175448488,0.0,0.2863229409830918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559755251971147,0.24203499548601165,0.0,0.15132414893532206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045069400855735,0.10883400026959478,0.1163445826063804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383148467171243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561319354585561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475126361669741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Krunk83,2020/01/09,What would lead to someone being placed in a mental facility? A friend of mine who has a history of depression had a panic attack and was taken to the ER. She was then taken to a mental health facility and has been there for 10 days now and doesn't know when she'll be out. She hopes soon. She explained a little to me but talking on the phone is limited. Seems like something more than a panic attack is going on here but I'm very inexperienced in this area. Does anyone have any idea or experience and could recommend what may be happening or what may have happened to lead to this? What she is telling me doesn't make sense but she said they took her from the ER to the mental facility in an ambulance and they didn't tell her. She also fought when she got there because she didn't want to go and was given a shot. Thanks!,3.4664302164900995,4.957685610778448,4.682275449101798,84.3733993551359,73.1317365269461,7.773192077383696,23.6245969599263,8.384062270229773,1.3019787194841088,655,18,135,11,13,216,98,167,0.127,0.792,0.081,-0.7955,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,3,8,10,3,2,13,0,24,1,0,3,0,26,43,15,0,4,5,0,0,1,1,4,1,1,0,0,7,7,0,1,4,0,0,5,4,6,2,0,14,1,16,4,19,21,1,20,0,1,0,0,22,9,0,6,7,99,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11567402207468025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836480827840953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114043057474642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.329113314509581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881753683458199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154887281114398,0.0,0.0,0.09328524255109882,0.0,0.12458410744668685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658142048723178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414923606520151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175378628061858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644122599829494,0.0,0.1156872880740353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558214378246473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15375282212531866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366694522254495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16328867078470335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949411793879807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066713742213154,0.14497412923909522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655288588464167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4373099665981281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394237910703794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112515656804734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759226433444574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13168104646667708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225587943063144,0.11135620075825972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626164723486852,0.2528554195554591,0.13317137219565126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607079564666748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11934878791390024,0.08531645123696459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027529618052357,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,addicted_to_games,2020/01/09,"Do I have a mental illnesses I checked and I have many symptoms of depression and I have paranoia I think people can hear my thoughts and I am even scared to think of anything, I never talked to anyone about this but I am anonymous so I feel better talking about this I guess


Also I think I have anxiety I am a bit on the chubby side and I don't even want anyone to look at me I have been bullied before I keep crying myself to sleep and always think that someone is speaking about me and need the approval of people to smile for once


I always cry myself to sleep and keep seeing dried water on my pillow I don't want to talk to anyone about it I keep thinking of suicidal thoughts, i hate putting on my mask everytime someone speaks with me so I hope you understand me.",2.193333333333335,4.3300206050955445,3.4486878980891724,88.97948619957536,78.61783439490445,5.715329087048832,23.842462845010616,6.742157984588678,0.8291667940552014,613,21,121,6,15,199,83,157,0.222,0.68,0.098,-0.9589,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,2,9,5,1,1,4,0,14,5,2,0,1,27,35,11,1,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,4,8,1,3,9,0,1,1,3,3,0,0,3,6,31,2,22,32,1,7,0,1,2,0,7,5,0,2,1,89,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509373697967803,0.19788831490577072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909672144204064,0.0,0.0,0.2494377215536855,0.0,0.09785429333069603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011851978769976,0.0,0.0,0.1051678387445932,0.12982090611837396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612380942994925,0.0,0.0,0.1024185736165942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708026710129522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06012538750372452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13099477250584782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11740080075778132,0.0,0.0,0.13402225984656288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810626497318727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170828594739994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09985597745435497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055791834633657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983514303504325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817160547403878,0.09171212384186044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12663720409188642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16487696283054998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195392196064782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190514730090212,0.0,0.09475732247098946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379953871000155,0.0,0.20150719308068696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007022747378355,0.0,0.0,0.12359490823693925,0.0,0.2867304422726564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3809694539693908,0.0,0.18880540001281484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123791394999626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14027454096356334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,esssadeee,2020/01/09,"Mom threatening time cut me out of her life My boyfriend and I got into a fight a couple of months ago. It was the first real argument we’ve had the 2 years we’ve been living together and we’ve been friends for 7. 

I opened up to my mom about it, which I normally don’t because she tends to over react and hold a grudge. But at the time, I thought we were breaking up. He wasn’t abusive but alcohol was involved and it was very dramatic. 

Fast forward to now, I’ve been relocated for work. She assumed it meant we were totally done. When I told her he was helping me move and that we weren’t calling it quits, she blocked my number. I got ahold of her today, she told me I was making a poor decision and that her life would be miserable without me but she didn’t want any part of it. 

I haven’t responded. I feel I should seek counseling, just wondering if anyone else has went through something similar because this is breaking my heart.",3.650345864661652,4.857659778947369,4.608120300751882,86.19684210526316,72.26315789473685,8.375939849624057,29.887218045112785,8.841846274778883,2.268458646616541,738,31,155,14,14,240,113,190,0.115,0.843,0.042,-0.9224,1,0,2,0,1,0,17.0,3,0,0,3,4,4,2,1,7,0,22,4,1,2,1,34,34,11,0,5,6,2,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,10,12,1,2,6,0,1,3,6,3,0,1,22,1,30,1,18,9,2,22,0,1,0,0,24,8,0,3,11,103,40,1,0.0,0.1777546420907316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298777336175288,0.16033069301715838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202188593278244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490070231300536,0.15371795193183665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829072313341324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15319191043175345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659993881408374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15352727334843247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532631898789667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585695543596631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12761086484338954,0.0,0.0,0.11590864899779753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399767867051855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17777989663846405,0.1005583401753962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21193365124309954,0.0,0.0,0.13247448773896053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014259858386773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514140426864313,0.11974822009491402,0.15945242819411412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14699227402479473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624620433002191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15956964990474545,0.0,0.17076086174317248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549628175466913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910279009806538,0.17496112438052489,0.0,0.142205797520127,0.28670990649951184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378602306939455,0.08848840767982165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907432545793652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461837971200284,0.16269530040035826,0.10921970989768072,0.0,0.0,0.1065731853904327,0.0,0.0,0.09661093631120696
mentalhealth,matilde97,2020/01/09,I'm afraid of having a relapse  I'm in a time of my life that I feel so affective and so proactive that I finally realized the trauma that I've been through and it's scary. It scares me to my bones to have a depression again even though I'm conscious that has a bpd carrier sometimes bad days happen. But oh my how I am terrified of going through that again. I hope not.,2.7626923076923084,4.010383987179488,4.305641025641027,87.34769230769234,74.51282051282051,8.276923076923078,28.384615384615394,8.841846274778883,2.0993692307692307,293,12,64,6,6,98,52,78,0.23600000000000002,0.6859999999999999,0.078,-0.9199,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,2,5,0,5,2,1,2,0,10,12,7,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,1,1,8,1,8,11,0,8,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,5,44,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493881171612303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3761812172689824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926260481439832,0.0,0.2572555274844809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197277532500216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510232737216461,0.0,0.0,0.3271930050493607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697486281905135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641246956702749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29665995553345925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21096887977222295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990341341931944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954054656343036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934548700795083,0.0,0.17416466048569396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,choochoolate,2020/01/09,After 10 years I was finally listened to but now I have anger towards everything. Long story short I feel zero relief about opening up about my trauma to a therapist that listened. Am I angry that it took so long or am I angry that I lost 10 years to my depression?,2.532264150943398,4.705466000000001,4.574188679245285,81.14769811320755,77.67924528301887,7.258867924528303,25.69433962264151,8.238735603445708,1.9709049056603776,210,8,38,4,5,72,36,53,0.373,0.5670000000000001,0.06,-0.9735,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,9,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,1,3,3,8,1,8,6,0,12,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,1,7,30,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532046196927997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642103478497337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486451660003995,0.0,0.0,0.32204081762505754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5203262551124651,0.0,0.0,0.3209139943296663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34133354158671353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3266226955646386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37862707731674855
mentalhealth,Petaoel,2020/01/09,"Thoughts I need to share  

Hurt. Confused

He never thought he would want to kill himself. He thought about it every now and then, but he never actually wanted to do that. 

One day, he woke up at 10am. It was a cloudy day. The sky was dark. For some reasons, he felt different. Everything was annoying. Everything was a distraction. The sounds. The piles of clothes. The opened closets. The blanket. Himself. He wanted to be out of that place. There was something inside him trying to tell him something, but he couldn’t hear it. He knew it was important, but he couldn’t hear it. He sat on his bed for 30 minutes trying to think, but his mind was blank. At a moment, he decided he would kill himself that day. He texted his therapist about what was happening, but his therapist didn’t answer. That was it. He - a 17 year old - would kill himself.

He knew everything was. Knives. Electric cords. Right. He knew where his meds were. He wanted to take his pills, go out to his trail, and commit suicide there so nobody could stop him. It would give him enough time.

He prepared for his death. Wrote some notes for people he loved. Wore his favorite leather jacket. He slowly walked to the room where his meds were. Every step had to be completely quiet. Nothing could stop him today. 

There was someone in the room where his meds were. She said Hi to him and smiled, asking him where he was going. He was disappointed that he couldn’t get the meds. 

He received a text from one of his friends. It gave him goosebumps. It was very sincere. It stirred his emotions a little bit. He thought she would be really hurt if he was gonna commit suicide, and he couldn’t let that happen because she was very important to him. She was his first love, his ex- girlfriend. Though he didn’t love her like he was, she still had a very important place in his heart.  

He walked out of the house. It started to rain. He was very confused about what he was going to do next, because he didn’t have his pills, so he couldn’t kill himself as planned. He walked slowly to his favorite trail. On the way, his therapist called him, and talked him through the suicidal thoughts. He decided to not kill himself anymore. 

He reached his favorite spot. The grass there was dying because of the cold, and it had a yellowish color that he really hated. He sat down and called the friend. They talked for a bit about… stuff. He finally felt better and decided to walk back home. It was raining very hard, and there was thunder and lightning. He thought he was stupid for being out that day. When he reached home, he was soaking wet. 

….

….

….

Hurt. Anger.

He hates it when people say: “Don’t kill yourself. You have to be alive for us. Don’t be selfish”. He hates it. Hates it. Hates it. Hates it. Hates it. Yes. Everyone has good intentions, but they should just shut up. No one listens. 

He considers himself not a selfish dick. He does think about other people. He cares about other people. He loves to help other people. Whenever he thinks about killing himself, he thinks people will get hurt, and will be sad. He doesn’t want that. He just cannot help himself, but other people don’t think so. People want him “to live for them”. Do they ever think that he has to live for himself too? He just cannot live for himself. That’s why he wants to commit suicide. Is that selfish? 

….

….

….

Crave.

He craves physical contacts. He wants to hug someone. Someone. Enjoy the scent of the people. It’s been so long since the last time he hugged or cuddled someone. He missed the warmth of people. Here, he cannot cuddles anybody. Even the dog doesn’t like to be cuddled. 

He craves music. Good music. He starts to listen to music a lot more. He starts to notice details in the music like the breath of the singers. 

He craves the out door. He wants fresh air. He wants the sun. He wants freedom",1.2231926225207277,3.881650716234656,1.7115467257844483,95.34504912635117,90.95088676671215,4.401768286283977,20.827067373281558,6.145766254072787,0.2106826634484209,2977,101,593,29,104,904,277,733,0.185,0.662,0.153,-0.9932,1,0,2,0,0,6,136.0,1,1,4,3,32,48,17,3,35,1,75,15,4,2,6,94,142,29,13,26,14,1,5,3,3,9,2,9,7,0,39,17,0,2,22,0,0,9,21,30,0,4,53,17,56,18,69,64,7,68,0,7,1,10,154,29,1,7,32,335,95,0,0.0,0.0,0.0437566518155928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044468499483761546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041918657349169865,0.0,0.0,0.034478624908505145,0.0,0.08200079425559308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03965668363697444,0.09790572222187824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157180017657973,0.0,0.045716616245026015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047013113367463694,0.0,0.0,0.07160100460682492,0.0,0.0,0.11567045876901268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046536075009957545,0.046847485501764916,0.0,0.0,0.03923914056226821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050438134832623126,0.0,0.04633094419557053,0.0,0.02961590982760288,0.040559679802200745,0.07555802469590832,0.042845836625158285,0.12089591297651812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610544699246453,0.04911922007009933,0.0,0.03814025356451596,0.0,0.0,0.06928540557297977,0.0,0.046853327707648516,0.0430139061489648,0.07644955817526815,0.07521809158342836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930242304916656,0.0,0.040167171648182266,0.309886418601781,0.0,0.0,0.1010742147502916,0.05313474166001393,0.060109624631466324,0.0,0.08995487201536981,0.0,0.0,0.051738488403014746,0.19200543050931687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472560013389639,0.0,0.0,0.0365499833511407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045851183604566505,0.0,0.06571859585158897,0.04494072047231535,0.11878167018288292,0.03968133608280094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038120737298571225,0.16187673929267432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19922524829087784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04527487263663987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033247744802855354,0.06916560660154598,0.0,0.04768706409423175,0.0,0.0,0.04302448145138326,0.05104979726534327,0.047051262956598665,0.0,0.0911527336514288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108589865517448,0.0,0.09369497100352983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057450359145784786,0.046102229562565614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03829248496475038,0.04265240648839673,0.035657981058166636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03709150109014224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519686455853189,0.06903890945787361,0.0,0.0,0.09521238182293,0.0,0.03580869275485025,0.07497526202211145,0.0,0.0,0.051330227577841406,0.19618750078316394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03371354489767995,0.07208020103250484,0.03919149157782114,0.0,0.0,0.15618551837759007,0.0,0.17238713232214334,0.04405434750019555,0.21358419379837856,0.052292268812655966,0.0,0.042502377696587004,0.0,0.0,0.0608858314838472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05393611157515698,0.0,0.0,0.18498543652234714,0.29092094482923936,0.03559131927894753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04046045988039199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15926262700898194,0.0,0.0,0.028875014776656088
mentalhealth,zwolfxo,2020/01/09,"Fat but skinny? Why do I think I look fat when I take pictures, but if I look back on that picture a month later I realize I look skinny in it???",2.6134375,2.3782334687500004,5.031250000000004,87.48875000000002,73.6875,7.65,25.375,7.1686216300943375,0.96395,109,3,26,1,2,39,22,32,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,5,6,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,2,6,0,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,1,4,17,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512671361763598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8232173570914788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26082591767325325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24569152335026925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093820019755448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29486047977559465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,connorgrs,2020/01/09,"Deafening silence? 20 M - I didn't know where else to post this or look for help, mostly because I don't even know how to describe it. Probably four times this past semester I'll be relaxed, doing nothing, and then suddenly my inner monologue, some song stuck in my head, some commercial jingle, whatever - it seems to become louder. Loud to the point that it is deafening and hurts, even if I'm sitting in complete silence. *Especially* if I'm sitting in complete silence. I've had two panic attacks in my life, and I don't know if it's related to that or if I'm just going insane, but it makes me feel like I need to just leave wherever I'm at and go someplace far away. Is this normal? What is happening?",1.908452380952383,4.338539607142857,3.8114285714285714,84.36023809523812,81.5,6.8761904761904775,27.190476190476193,8.021203637495839,2.0694619047619054,555,25,105,11,15,187,89,140,0.107,0.84,0.053,-0.5171,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,1,1,1,0,9,2,1,2,0,25,25,13,0,6,9,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,11,4,0,0,5,2,0,2,3,3,0,2,3,4,8,2,13,21,3,19,0,1,1,0,1,10,0,10,5,65,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20225178184120512,0.1670312908494723,0.0,0.0,0.10837377022574096,0.19634536931014054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3728004143326724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14851338132630376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23484561356896716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989151712021545,0.1270069257530143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20207430737125612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721132920530248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824548024431218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916299178507793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19031845298277605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29311169661381964,0.0,0.0,0.1882446226301904,0.0,0.0,0.12557212011461855,0.08685491489483532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14929143377808513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867033238189355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182250812929006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17418783078096411,0.17058585746231952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20858793466188585,0.0,0.0,0.16971227303238767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16806069922006486,0.0,0.17026524761172968,0.0,0.19167820394710547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184532869650675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366564817447944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17366640108119286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nnymsccnt1,2020/01/09,"What do I do myself in order to get past my phobia/anxiety? I am a 23 year old female and I am 5'0 and about 115 lbs, I live in the United States. I have been noticing for the past year and a half that I am terrified of being stalked/attacked/kidnapped when I go outside. It used to be at all times, and even inside, but has improved and I mainly only experience this when it is dark outside now. It will prevent me from going outside when it is dark. This is a problem because I am at work from about 730am-4pm and I am a full-time online student for my Masters. I love working out and have found that I will actually go to the gym and get a good workout in if I go around 5:30am. However, it is dark outside and I have to walk about 30 seconds to get to my car in the parking lot. I almost did not even go to the gym today. I do not want my fear to get in the way of what I want to do. Sometimes I feel like an idiot because I have a Bachelors degree in Psychology and I'm working towards a Masters in School Counseling. I'm aware that my fear is rational, in that it is normal to fear this, but I know it is irrational to fear this so much that it doesn't allow me to do certain things (I avoid doing other things I have not mentioned but aren't as important, but I REALLY want to continue working out before work). I want to try to work on this myself first before I seek out therapy - because I am unsure if insurance will cover this. I have pepper spray and am thinking of learning self-defense. 

Thoughts I experience when I have to walk outside in the dark: What if someone IS out there? What if someone has been following me? What if someone knows that I am going to leave my apartment at this time? What will I do if someone does attack me? Even if I pepper spray them? How can I get to my car fast while still being completely aware of what is around me? Maybe I should just stay home. I can't let this control me. But what if it does happen? 

I also experience an elevated heart-rate and am on high alert. I am very good at controlling my breath but it does not seem to actually help when trying to cope. I keep battle rational vs. irrational thoughts but it's hard to determine which ones are rational sometimes. 

Once I am outside and I think the coast is clear, I've made sure I have my belongings in a good position and I walk really fast while looking all around me. I try to be quiet so that hopefully no one would notice me. Once I get to my car I get in as fast as I can and lock the doors once I am inside. Once I am inside my car, I am extremely relieved but also I feel like I shouldn't feel this way.

 This just sucks and I want things to get better.",2.578340457011344,3.9715822766726983,4.269637925365775,86.83670413447314,75.2386980108499,7.269587374650666,25.768905145487427,7.924219607001951,1.4037056057866186,2081,73,443,31,44,701,214,553,0.08800000000000001,0.782,0.13,0.9853,1,1,0,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,1,12,24,21,4,5,19,0,62,2,1,6,5,85,103,47,0,19,23,0,4,2,0,7,0,1,2,0,41,23,0,5,12,3,0,14,9,10,0,5,7,6,74,11,63,84,5,68,0,0,1,1,4,27,1,12,24,326,115,9,0.0,0.0,0.12791364080942708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562805743120084,0.0,0.0,0.10482337427756112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050137320642973535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17503139135488174,0.0,0.07456031943865009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11985629278380795,0.0,0.11153809078589763,0.0,0.0,0.05796411032328331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871662075474039,0.0,0.14701560670250324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720614280328911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986410161925646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19232978691360375,0.0,0.2949993547209918,0.0994157901150713,0.09364245762245628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055747623417263414,0.0,0.07186036721959166,0.0,0.0,0.27393228149082666,0.0,0.223484679899249,0.16491355399611424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05795611202142716,0.0,0.0587102640781267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766428619635285,0.043929554794906255,0.06924577976895882,0.0657411771159079,0.06509522924971882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05825426628384825,0.0,0.0,0.07203727793076523,0.0,0.0,0.0693965663399443,0.0,0.06701828849929974,0.0,0.06403830058179824,0.0,0.057872328221659365,0.0,0.055036434738002,0.0,0.0,0.05571909750716273,0.059151701016077536,0.06201479059349714,0.0,0.0,0.06584295126780695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481788645986769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421451612006636,0.0,0.1492336629939821,0.06877238202347506,0.2791885031255956,0.08882213749065751,0.049845526871090035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512919465786626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271217818699379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397219964540084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632918528817422,0.0,0.05966444051770714,0.06837169557583353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221246592131681,0.0,0.12963992037621744,0.0,0.0,0.06985608369560553,0.052339702340602805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061769935198604964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494980498392019,0.0,0.13062402817702068,0.08398976616154168,0.0,0.10406163297272356,0.07643288748647441,0.0,0.06212351321051575,0.0,0.0,0.13349047611601336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056604839517448775,0.0,0.05407671679729049,0.19328363749364225,0.10404395769053323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862799777083747,0.0,0.0,0.04655717844100017,0.0,0.0,0.0844102122820991
mentalhealth,greenface2020,2020/01/09,"Should I seek professional help? I’ve never been one to focus on dating. Growing up I was never very good at making friends and being part of the social system so I occupied myself occupied with my academics and other professional development type  things . I was always good at those and they gave me my sense of self worth and meaning. I’ve essentially kept up this policy until today, I’m about to graduate college . I have a pretty difficult major and my standards for myself are very high so it’s not hard to let that part of my life consume all of my time . So long as I’m focusing on my work I feel somewhat at peace, but it’s a fragile peace because the moment my mind drifts to those parts of my life that I don’t focus on, relationships, friendships, etc etc, my mind floods with stress and anxiety, feelings of self loathing, the idea that I’ve never been good enough and never will be good enough  completely dominates my thinking and any self worth I might have from how good at school I am goes out the window, I’m nothing, garbage . I enter a very bad and very distressed emotional state. I essentially avoid this by shunning this part of my mind, focusing on what I’m good at and what I can control. I don’t see any way of ever getting out of this system. I don’t wanna be in that state ever, it’s really awful. And I know that ever making an active effort to date or even to expand my social circle past the couple of friends I have would get that dark part of my mind going. But that future in itself, never having a partner or real social life, never having a full normal life is pretty dark in itself . What should I do? Should I seek professional help?",5.37748112659698,6.021482564024392,6.258745644599304,78.0097154471545,67.87195121951221,8.564692218350755,27.509291521486645,8.563005593585519,1.9669925667828103,1323,39,244,19,21,438,160,328,0.133,0.74,0.127,-0.8013,0,1,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,3,9,13,0,3,11,1,27,4,0,4,10,56,44,21,0,6,5,0,4,0,3,6,4,0,1,4,23,15,0,3,6,0,2,4,10,5,0,1,6,5,35,8,42,28,13,45,0,0,1,0,14,18,0,4,18,181,58,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06044536318756773,0.0,0.0,0.09880039028905488,0.0,0.055572218262822416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060654440542292236,0.04428291458562402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616551897655502,0.0,0.08147606691920169,0.0,0.08037885295937766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171436521783051,0.0,0.15012068576473497,0.16203381691124924,0.04798046715926152,0.1971311091978535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346165712081451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224865776745732,0.0,0.07590665167692079,0.0,0.04128507882779663,0.3655804458491413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507447082884439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738305820669244,0.07675203895522104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200587530068297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039923068094676106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074283087096036,0.20524152505863802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428737303157009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969804442858964,0.0,0.0,0.07913026644616028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770634673255024,0.29339764367561544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3361637176180402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117538511635578,0.06970357255066773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04922523928183824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3933301452541873,0.06934661473132248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780948191519214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268441438847969,0.04653740314459247,0.0,0.0,0.07799212884445303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351928493103846,0.05788760972741401,0.0,0.2273496114758153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22215325816162992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321309284364413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048261234752411765,0.04654713850995081,0.0,0.0,0.042359115439203,0.0,0.06885771698835166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23975458363206484,0.0,0.05766117386765943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0528854660276417,0.0,0.0,0.05160398778483638,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwitallaway3214,2020/01/09,"Inpatient Experiences? Help? Hey, guys.

New(ish) to Reddit but finding it a fantastic resource.

I’ve been in a down spiral for around four months due to several circumstances. I think my only resort at this point is going in patient. I can’t take care of myself. I‘m honestly too tired to even explain any of it. I’m not here for advice on that end of things. I’m having trouble even speaking because I’m so tired. I’ve been catatonic and it’s all too much.

What I’m looking for is experiences, advice, etc. on inpatient. Whether it’s actually going to help. I did have one previous hospitalization (voluntary). They wanted me for at least 3 weeks after seeing my trauma history but it was a religious hospital and a public ward and they were horrible. I only made it 3 days before signing myself back out. They gave me meds but those meds cost ~$500 a month without insurance so lmao.

I have insurance now through my boyfriend. But I’m unsure as to how anything works out financially because I can’t even take care of my personal hygiene right now, let alone be part of the work force.

I’m increasingly suicidal, more so than I’ve ever been in my life. My mom has Munchausen’s by proxy (yes, like Gypsy Rose’s mom, very similar case). So I’ve been pretty suicidal since I was very young. But it’s different now. I’m at a loss. I have a plan, and I was always told if you have a plan that you need to get help ASAP. But I’m so scared of the financial strain this would cause my partner and I. We’re already in a horribly tight spot and i know how expensive hospitalization is.

So, I guess:

1. Have you been inpatient? What was your experience?
2. What should I know before I go?
3. Is inpatient helpful?
4. How much did it cost for you? What was the process like with the insurance company? What was your copay?

I guess this is more a question for the Americans. Probably wouldn’t make much sense to somebody who has health care covered nationally, tbh.",1.6880531914893595,4.353113181578949,3.4931914893617027,84.4186170212766,85.60526315789474,7.2340425531914905,24.66405375139977,8.265842613841098,2.0149613661814114,1539,63,296,38,47,513,200,380,0.124,0.746,0.13,0.5316,1,1,0,0,0,0,60.0,0,6,3,5,21,11,0,2,15,1,34,4,0,6,2,43,66,24,2,6,10,2,1,2,1,3,4,1,0,3,21,10,0,1,6,0,3,4,5,5,0,2,17,4,35,6,39,44,10,33,0,1,2,0,26,16,0,4,15,190,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.08910247492689848,0.0,0.0,0.17844831558354382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456653023545676,0.10075956095967062,0.0,0.07597475049092148,0.0,0.0,0.062091900890095836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513789304644056,0.08128260108893261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020945808127978,0.0,0.11131981707889056,0.0,0.15539108846805852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792807596350514,0.09379745553471254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058885470691887126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953963964130764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087091346212638,0.0,0.10183145705257182,0.18092226576012227,0.08259242201275499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679473417803323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345295705894425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04770414650218766,0.0,0.1556756414817113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011699409636357,0.0904082995930184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970550866724282,0.0,0.0,0.24480466851816626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003598945352664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336760853440444,0.06449284458891877,0.08921599034854996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766748958950326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639690480214528,0.060948141168875786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028430187649468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21387534361254587,0.14576077565940365,0.0,0.2013634846641157,0.06770299428204099,0.0,0.088184883544515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618719960485369,0.13888619791117762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887659886669717,0.0,0.0,0.07972576315890599,0.0,0.0,0.08631464170877587,0.0,0.0,0.09289205917956016,0.09844440475290374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022847527975945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797569146377074,0.0,0.0,0.09141425012127684,0.0,0.07275986897305449,0.0,0.0,0.10315093684197743,0.0,0.07553010590969624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19975010820267347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373030231655853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066032322976295,0.0585058480563028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209887962656154,0.0,0.0872477652016034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15067569876267514,0.05385524281719218,0.0,0.07324097945309911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801670365004031,0.0,0.13294518798995614,0.0,0.0,0.0648618833527976,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoNameIsAvailable1,2020/01/09,"Something is wrong. I dont know why. I keep feeling extremely down and sad at many points. I have no idea why. It may be existantial crisis, it may be problems with my sexuality, I do not know. I am seriously considering self harm and I am not happy about it. I also have low self esteem. Anyone have any ideas what to do?",0.2240341880341888,2.6268479846153845,3.2020512820512828,84.96905982905986,92.23076923076924,5.965811965811964,19.52991452991453,7.3871296695380915,0.8013247863247863,249,8,52,5,9,88,45,65,0.325,0.634,0.040999999999999995,-0.9684,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,13,0,0,0,0,14,17,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,1,8,1,5,13,0,4,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,2,0,36,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16432257569572167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397336961594432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14367665065097193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408214604365367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389704783004547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187376721542068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4639246476265895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18264039193547515,0.0,0.0,0.2258532724647437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083248412817986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19424536446377544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19661696102034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4287216739257267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15818882580631222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3708281425834529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246605250728924,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AgfaAPX100,2020/01/09,"I am expecting to much from other people I just need help... Someone who understands... Someone who I can really talk to without being scared. Without them running away or telling me ""I don't know how to help you.""  


But I expect too much, I need to help myself but I can't. I hate myself so much.",0.8259806295399521,3.2116598305084736,2.897142857142857,89.3037288135593,86.28813559322035,5.405326876513318,21.987893462469735,6.868970318607317,0.7827317191283292,226,8,45,3,7,76,38,59,0.0,0.83,0.17,0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,0,4,2,1,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,13,10,5,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,13,0,8,9,3,2,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,1,0,39,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19082405304791186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20052436945235916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084114709902352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162132488098747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4479171494737429,0.30119991477335706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408075958401193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13011441363177093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033437711107456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34418081113421506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16324829350510092,0.17752292663872174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114397113622979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3915723952707984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaptainJackKenway,2020/01/09,"Road Blocks Has anyone else dealt with the problem of “just starting” something? As in you have to start something like a project or a poem and no matter how many times someone says “just start by saying...” or “just start by talking about...” you just can’t do it? 

I’m not sure if it’s tied to my ADHD or my DPDR but I cannot just do things I don’t think I know as much as others do. And it’s to the point of failing classes and losing friends.

For instance I didn’t think I would make a hockey team so I literally refused to go inside and even watch them tryout. I sat outside crying until the end of tryouts. 

Or when I had made a basketball team and I knew how to play defense but then the coaches switched me to offense and I had a meltdown.

It’s not even about laziness or me just not wanting to do something, it’s like I can’t physically or mentally get myself to do it without knowing ever single little piece of how something works and I’ll obsess over it until I can get to that point.

It’s gotten in the way of literally everything from writing papers to fixing my car. I’m not sure if it’s tied to anything or if it’s just my personality...",4.3321896792189705,4.557757728033477,5.633205020920503,83.05429846582986,70.04602510460249,7.5448814504881465,30.15927475592748,7.0316486544052195,1.6560407810320792,903,34,186,7,15,304,124,239,0.125,0.81,0.064,-0.9239,0,0,4,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,1,5,17,12,2,1,10,0,16,0,0,5,3,53,35,30,0,6,24,0,0,2,1,1,0,2,0,1,13,8,0,3,5,5,0,2,11,6,0,0,7,3,22,6,32,27,3,21,0,2,1,0,12,7,0,10,13,136,35,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611184375901949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374041121132587,0.1373640376749577,0.11032294921326367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472626086653877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119929649514913,0.0,0.11874058902873455,0.0,0.0,0.17709553398191016,0.1212682337722971,0.0,0.0,0.1204877512877226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035772323771727,0.0,0.1400854327541529,0.0,0.07619145366202004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735573621979808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13099344116757028,0.1343669827451766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998291619052218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12685425361580302,0.08948851784625918,0.13591948447301788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13510461267489512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855219779397052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705919561162542,0.0,0.0,0.2534669378528556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828079366870476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21322556804678056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359168346972424,0.4128349460523896,0.0,0.0,0.3795637254609621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25270678012535963,0.0,0.0,0.10775527212975784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906592250066189,0.1718051289994265,0.0,0.0,0.07817358408377874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907420580075124,0.10641347386449744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923256073604095,0.0,0.09759992347468764,0.0,0.0,0.09523496032267713,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jewclaave2,2020/01/09,"Anyone just so confused they don’t even know where to start sometimes? Mental illness is chaos, certainly. But sometimes it’s like I don’t even know what to do anymore? Is there something in my past I’m missing? Why am I so afraid? What do I need to do to fix my problems? Why do I sometimes act in the manner I do? Or is my chemistry just off? Ugh.",-0.29493150684931635,1.9740839589041137,1.4816575342465759,97.4419383561644,92.97260273972604,3.4679452054794515,22.36849315068493,4.935628992294339,-0.07786465753424697,271,11,59,1,10,88,45,73,0.22899999999999998,0.7090000000000001,0.062,-0.9209,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,8,7,0,2,1,0,11,1,0,0,1,10,17,4,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,9,2,7,17,0,7,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,2,3,41,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153363775337964,0.1518235869017882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868269815118173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23865989208227906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607961839336373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188177610725168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16100046122827635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072768499254676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20776578610781504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671586498772131,0.644246637892387,0.0,0.15368698918809068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3918553117438412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,someofthisistrue,2020/01/09,"Cognitive Decline with Schizophrenia I talk about positive symptoms of schizophrenia all the time... and negative ones some of the time. But I almost never talk about the cognitive symptoms of schizophrenia and my experiences with them. I think that is for two reasons - because they are the hardest to describe and - because they are the hardest to come to terms with; a reminder of how I used to be before this disease took over.

I wrote a blog post about my experiences with a cognitive decline with schizophrenia at [https://www.someofthisistrue.com/cognitive-decline-with-schizophrenia-my-experience/](https://www.someofthisistrue.com/cognitive-decline-with-schizophrenia-my-experience/)

I would appreciate it if you gave it a read and let me know some of your experiences with the same.

All the best.",14.511850931677015,17.01265832173913,9.902360248447213,53.32869565217394,48.39130434782609,10.049689440993786,39.03726708074535,9.957137785484203,4.041422360248447,677,26,86,10,7,186,65,115,0.032,0.877,0.091,0.7783,0,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,2,3,1,4,1,0,0,11,0,6,2,0,3,3,27,13,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,11,0,0,3,2,0,2,2,0,0,2,3,0,14,1,21,7,7,9,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,4,4,73,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16274537559323904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19814754186766967,0.0,0.1382968595172356,0.0,0.17056002839580162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400009522804361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6359227975389499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931952515772047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619289005877586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534934924378327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013119001781548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15565408589864202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16256904628382834,0.0,0.0,0.16710283501586282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.337851543904038,0.0,0.2612629813206497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413949898088816,0.0,0.0,0.18953934442905315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18057132694676006,0.0,0.0,0.15876337238966767,0.0,0.0,0.14036947348806605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545314288610632,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StraightPurpose,2020/01/09,Fuck I can't believe how forgetful I am -_- Today I think I  unintentionally pushed away a friend that I haven't seen in a while over the phone because I wasn't able to recognize who it was he called me out of the blue  and I feel like shit because I am super forgetful like what the fuck is wrong with me I have such a shitty memory  And Its Soo hard to remember things and even when I do it's even harder to re visit like holy shit...me and the guy go waaay back to our military days and I feel like absolute shit about it,2.8623648648648654,3.732176351351352,4.491520270270272,87.57349662162164,73.77477477477478,8.432882882882884,22.884009009009013,8.841846274778883,1.2093144144144141,409,10,95,8,8,138,70,111,0.184,0.644,0.171,-0.5532,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,1,8,11,4,0,7,0,9,4,2,1,0,14,16,8,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,4,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,3,5,14,6,11,13,0,12,0,0,2,2,8,4,4,0,9,61,22,0,0.1686700072118097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15847102405260682,0.12969682416768075,0.0,0.205639341715826,0.0,0.0,0.19003333859754032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722309358006061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877820093007036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228098979973522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17056924722590666,0.2409957737079557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031402916780085,0.3118654075100629,0.0,0.0,0.09585905210031301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700982540044948,0.0,0.0,0.1510951962960176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32961458269015226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19107023791813785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5194120156493677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205685802014437,0.10807693002493884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987944477051352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18441417462478926,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnluckyDustBunny,2020/01/09,"Feeling low at the start of year. I've never really posted online about anything...but today I started writing and it felt cathartic, and I just wanted to feel less alone. Sorry for the wall of text.   

Not a love letter to myself:

I want to be better. In any sense of the word really. But, “better” seems vague and objective now that I put it into words. Writing this feels like some sort of detached way to talk to myself. I don’t have many people to talk to these days. Maybe I should break it down? That seems logical… and potentially helpful. 

So, make *what* better, I guess… my outlook on my body for one thing. People often say that your internal narrative should be like that of a loving mother…I am very good at mothering others, not so much myself. Its like no matter what I’m never reaching the potential I think I have. I have these bars high or low and nothing ever seems to help overcome them I just keep surrounding myself with more mental obstacles until I just turn around and go home. 

I get so discouraged to the point of lethargy. Working out is fulfilling, but… not seeing results is devastating. I want to be the best version of myself I can be. Accepting my body for what it is… is so hard because I have always hated it. Even at my skinniest I was so insecure, but losing that weight gave me a sense of confidence I had never felt before. I know I’m not fat. I know that. But body dysmorphia is a powerful horrible thing and I can’t help but be disgusted when I look in a mirror. It has always been that way ever since I was young, and I started to get my little pudge of a belly. 

My mother was obese. My whole life she was just a very large, vain, look obsessed, neurotic woman. She has her problems, I know. But she projected her own insecurities about her weight onto her unassuming, and undeserving child from such a young age. My mother always thought back to her younger years when she was bright skinny and beautiful. But never about the present. 

She would tell me I was pretty. But she would also ask me if I had to use the bathroom when my stomach looked bloated. I only wore high waisted pants growing up because I feared the ridicule of my tiny tummy. I wore tank tops almost religiously creating layers between me and the world.  I remember wanting so badly to have a flat stomach. 

I still do.

I just always feel as if I’m never quite in the present. Like my life isn’t my own so trying to accomplish any goals I have seems impossible. Start small? Build up from there, even if you have failed you will have created a few new building blocks build for when you start again. I know. I’m just a defeatist at heart. And its hard. 

I can’t write a love letter to myself. I don’t know how to genuinely feel that way. 

I want, to be someone that helps people. But I’m afraid of having my own voice. My insecurities and anxiety make me feel small and unable to even imagine people listening to a word I have to say. Helping people understand their own bodies and minds. Letting others know they aren’t alone. Being able to give people the tools they need to become the best versions of themselves. I want to do that for others. Why can’t I do that for myself?

Why can I support body positivity but hate my own so greatly? 

Its like my whole life is this giant artist block but it’s just me, in the way of myself. 

I want to stop feeling sorry. I apologize for merely existing almost every day. And it has to stop. I deserve to be here, to be happy, to love myself.",2.4385181990684828,4.785791586510264,3.806807831637052,85.63315292392619,78.88269794721406,6.475107814386753,22.63938243919269,7.618777277803332,1.1262284974987065,2730,86,522,42,68,895,300,682,0.161,0.696,0.14300000000000002,-0.9474,2,2,0,0,0,0,82.0,0,4,4,13,38,38,4,6,27,0,55,22,11,5,7,114,120,46,0,16,25,3,13,5,0,5,5,4,1,2,34,20,7,6,25,2,0,3,17,18,0,1,15,22,95,20,74,90,16,72,0,5,5,4,48,29,0,13,39,374,129,5,0.055385294448760336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092074400245198,0.11472492343612292,0.0,0.0442915999605179,0.18434000721920235,0.0,0.0,0.07532779893566083,0.0,0.04236959865708432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04930465442370829,0.0517777738444154,0.0,0.0,0.04258787270089797,0.046244407419420236,0.06752472285649384,0.06116870631706644,0.04712880625620563,0.0,0.11624689904569918,0.14695137630514693,0.0,0.3076028820585203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07143786601672157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097443938967613,0.100198339393704,0.04666449932124282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062323854283280994,0.19603128310633494,0.039567265420699486,0.1063571364896404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057873060811499226,0.05313062119796435,0.03147673918984194,0.046454557246123324,0.0,0.06106248265702401,0.061013146028617724,0.0,0.0,0.05895867582607085,0.09922869009117168,0.10936302363044904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563184059157665,0.18561797698551524,0.11703520889757822,0.05555596617298846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0492289945066196,0.0,0.0,0.1826298562707364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05663521604236275,0.1173608142207272,0.13529228624190404,0.05551061527658197,0.0,0.0,0.1395290945823263,0.06196197747850954,0.0,0.0,0.19994956250509466,0.0,0.07394022823681444,0.056151995505338496,0.055641972563324614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055815350044071316,0.0,0.055923358820581935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04071456413349499,0.04106749404923805,0.21358276736990808,0.05349146250622733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05314368377323718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03753050890116657,0.04212301218523476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23038313707105165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05235700536331443,0.0,0.053043802172453865,0.05634675582716416,0.0,0.05299624684006445,0.0,0.055677518441978026,0.0,0.05890907815690598,0.0,0.0,0.07096247569078679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274074189255034,0.0,0.0,0.0880892182971964,0.0,0.0,0.04413490891741659,0.2016827677598692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04581528790385518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046927780254360806,0.0,0.0,0.12399860534908835,0.1960099823868932,0.0,0.04423076769088145,0.09260917229696417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285057579501964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903320344049481,0.04840918855388674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359105722518855,0.035488660322593464,0.0,0.0439697371948915,0.0,0.0,0.05249878310492663,0.0,0.0,0.037602979344497765,0.060243296072584926,0.0,0.057658044788476616,0.0,0.04783511168220121,0.0,0.09139733667499476,0.2286737715456393,0.17584907504068445,0.0,0.1348887355067858,0.0,0.0,0.09995322721706718,0.12367140665829625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04032115399437077,0.0,0.0,0.07868824818934099,0.0,0.0,0.07133262749358836
mentalhealth,RjWhatnow,2020/01/09,"Just Looking for Tips for Healthier Coping Okay so this is gonna be alittle long so sorry about that. I've dealt with things like depression and anxiety forever. And I am glad to say that I have gotten a lot better coping and dealing with my mental health and reacting less emotionally to the hustle that is life. I'm actually making decisions and taking actions to better my mental health and life in general. I've recently committed myself pretty well to losing weight, quitting smoking and drinking, writing in the novel I've always convinced myself I wasn't smart enough to do, saving money, and undoing the damage that I have created to others and myself while fighting my afflictions. However when my mental health dips still I have recently adopted some coping mechanisms that still stifle my life. For example, lately when I'm feeling depressed I've started spending money on pointless things causing myself more anguish once I realize that I'm just putting myself behind instead of sticking with saving money. I'm also still doing the bare minimum to get by when I get depressed stopping all work on my self-growth and productive hobbies in order to lay in bed whenever I'm not working. I've stopped treating the people I care about shitty when im depressed, yet when im anxious I still do. Also when I'm really anxious I start smoking and if its especially bad drinking again. I understand I'm still on a journey to get better and I know these issues won't ever disappear; however, if y'all have any advice for how to remove these coping mechanisms and/or replace them with things that are healthier/more productive for my physical/emotional health and my ability to live a more productive life I would love to hear them and would appreciate it greatly! Thank you!

TL:DR Dude has bad coping mechanisms, do you have any ideas for cancelling them or replacing them with better coping mechanisms",8.78120430759897,8.894441772334293,8.807559532837859,64.4454451691188,60.671469740634,11.685666616107993,39.300621871682075,11.20814326018867,4.877591354466858,1553,73,228,38,19,508,180,347,0.135,0.721,0.14400000000000002,0.1607,2,0,2,0,2,0,26.0,0,3,4,8,25,27,1,1,8,1,19,12,0,4,3,49,43,29,0,5,6,0,2,1,0,4,8,2,1,0,16,19,3,2,6,3,4,5,3,10,1,0,2,5,33,17,35,36,7,36,0,6,1,1,13,7,0,5,24,160,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.07856582951373824,0.0,0.0,0.07867312300052673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12876711663325108,0.06699049941447356,0.0,0.0,0.10949868011000732,0.0,0.06158968130349993,0.1819060340300981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344444321072216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848170613083804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208497974179492,0.08270561402933617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300194015212857,0.2773714617423767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15773766304406764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811250970001634,0.0,0.08318801626367996,0.0,0.0,0.07282561065003518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040708110918840267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261889474202867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876220133413466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3423120805209044,0.09074025542188066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088562383629968,0.1739285298870982,0.08403118402975293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04424601208071601,0.0,0.09081842058691082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274654587085725,0.03933296069146278,0.0,0.07109151836902293,0.07124852922242382,0.06760785044203313,0.09006973317643073,0.0,0.06844644695758641,0.07266312534095684,0.0,0.053740833486181874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24340445012566986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574017673158423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055815271797223454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190728361551072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093446068169921,0.0,0.0856319499018942,0.0,0.0,0.05157655961855742,0.0,0.15898718336266496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402452528650067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398914993247948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012399016732103,0.11397032523455243,0.0,0.32147565379817955,0.13461938721001432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06053325633546304,0.0,0.0,0.07412249227685945,0.0,0.0,0.16046115274669295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381341140014406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803909518394684,0.07238786699284112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722400508919678,0.0,0.0,0.11438352691362792,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lizahlizah,2020/01/09,"Anonymously Share Your Story: Find others just like you This is my first post to the ominous Reddit world.  Basically hi, my name is Lizah and I suffer from mental illness. I am developing a project in which people anonymously share their stories about physical or mental health. Looking for stories! If you're interested in some more information please message me!",5.5609907834101335,9.025079661290329,5.564285714285717,70.94500000000002,74.96774193548387,8.058986175115209,31.43778801843318,8.841846274778883,3.5041400921658994,297,14,42,7,7,93,53,62,0.121,0.701,0.179,0.4875,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,1,1,2,5,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,8,4,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,8,4,6,4,2,5,0,1,1,0,9,3,0,3,2,29,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848169580936395,0.2650656029802237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33123972508284943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15224281966688022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616840838311445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6280835742704316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160395304472204,0.0,0.0,0.3420674924886817,0.0,0.0,0.2984478359005411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayokayyyyyy12,2020/01/09,"saw gore videos, think i have PTSD i was scrolling through a crime stories subreddit and found the story about the teens from Ukraine who beat and old man to death with a hammer. idk what it was. morbid curiosity? wondering if it was real? but i found the video, skipped a minute in, and immediately regretted it. i turned it off when i saw what kind of sick shit was taking place.

i already have diagnosed depression and anxiety, this made my heart rate spike. i have a huge fear of death and the thought of that happening makes me fucking sick. i don't ever look at gore, i try to avoid it. idk what it was this time but it just got to me. so i decided to look, and i absolutely still regret it. it's scarred me. i worry about those things happening to me or my family. i don't know how to cope with this, and im afraid to bring it up to a therapist in case me seeing it was illegal or if he'll report me bc he thinks im a physcopath. this just really got to me and i needed a place to vent. much love to everyone, sorry mods if this wasn't what this sub was made for.",1.047978848413628,3.1700455135135144,2.8446180963572267,91.8596650998825,82.60360360360359,6.923932628280454,20.913435174304734,8.04050195162591,0.8972669016842936,832,25,189,17,23,276,121,222,0.24600000000000002,0.7190000000000001,0.036000000000000004,-0.9943,0,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,9,10,2,3,11,0,13,7,2,4,1,37,39,18,2,6,9,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,25,10,0,1,8,2,0,1,3,8,0,0,17,5,23,2,26,21,1,14,0,3,5,2,5,8,2,6,5,121,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751792971465538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226395061455168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11513739341226514,0.13568121386971796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092016866089147,0.0,0.12773586518427166,0.0,0.0,0.12602051805776854,0.15042586568065822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931439075820559,0.0,0.12358393823257595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21383036845976916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364235225003497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15841007509465502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28879218424897146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920594612781742,0.07346639726898654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22451312403096269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12065037688292632,0.2529803109258864,0.08923166714459754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826933244137673,0.09912116981104488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402734607414519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793318820975857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562634163030952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215579175959215,0.08563809122033739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652473209476036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721941348945113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14964252265311725,0.0,0.0,0.1067560983853623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050985498565992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521144246954185,0.08881028473573949,0.17131201246342145,0.0,0.106126070945951,0.07794920960081078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075916092027364,0.14540419663367635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496900516473868,0.0,0.1357573561354161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CosmicBitSwap,2020/01/09,"I feel as though my obsessive behaviors effects me positively... For clarification, I'm not saying that I have OCD because I have not be medically diagnosed as such. I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety and am on medication and have access to mental health services.

I go into these random ""attacks"" (for lack of a better term) where I must clean, organize, scrub, wash, organize more. It brings me relief and feelings of control because of some terrible experiences I had a year ago involving a temporary housing situation. I now live on my own with my parrot (messy guy gives me plenty to clean). I must run the dishwasher as soon as I can and leaving the sink full or with stuff in it I can tolerate (likely due to the medicine) but it will bring on an ""attack"" sooner or so it feels.

I also obsessively check my security cameras for fear of theft, intruders, and privacy. This obsession is also formed from experiences I've had.

I've learned not to trust people in general. Because of theft and deception.

I've been driven to clean obsessively and live alone because of several verbally and emotionally abusive roommates. Followed by a landlord who refused to help me with hazardous conditions that kept getting worse, forcing me to leave eventually.

I've become paranoid from witnessing horrible human behaviors, hearing about even worse behaviors and crimes regularly, and being assaulted in a park as a child.

These behaviors consume immense amount of time and energy. However... I feel pleasure from my cleanliness and my environment control. Is that normal? I feel safe with my security tendencies as well... I know it's obsessive behavior and potentially unhealthy but why do I not want to lose these coping mechanisms? I never want to abandon my current obsessive behaviors. I live a comfortable and fortunate life despite everything above and an learning to love everyday of my life more than the last.

Im not trying to glorify obsessive compulsive disorder as a desirable thing for clarification. I just feel as though (especially after reading all this) that I may have OCD... And I may not want it to change..

Yours truly,

A Reddit User.",6.963571428571428,9.02686093915344,7.8744708994709,62.65154761904766,65.26984126984127,12.066666666666668,38.89682539682539,11.698219412168324,5.686565079365081,1737,96,256,63,28,583,210,378,0.19,0.677,0.132,-0.9605,3,1,0,0,0,0,58.0,0,1,0,6,13,26,3,8,15,0,22,9,0,3,4,67,43,34,0,8,11,0,6,1,0,5,8,2,4,3,18,23,0,8,12,1,1,6,7,15,1,0,6,8,36,11,51,30,10,27,0,3,0,1,12,9,0,6,13,190,54,4,0.0,0.11830819627733387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885127015998657,0.0,0.0,0.10341647446853396,0.0,0.15970308732566768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638644483736898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271919462315836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434752124692957,0.11027859972614044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831090810149153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105630090560882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239848357988974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600231164307245,0.20269519212671014,0.0,0.0,0.11443895010200085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123199693345374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595125086781055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897404664364563,0.1953486740050842,0.0,0.1123611695213937,0.30292878319785543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216850651602915,0.09578705944704208,0.05674814673712019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988690986475401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613792076234192,0.1125403698901487,0.0,0.06692863661316445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11521570831527335,0.0,0.0,0.10785720734936263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054876003407491464,0.08139264115933753,0.0,0.2114575297861224,0.0,0.0,0.1410567269249843,0.048782603977820686,0.0,0.26451322192463983,0.0,0.0,0.11170875638882377,0.0,0.0,0.09012025550540416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20118060716298092,0.10062724907371803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701195571833062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783368018991287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922474820435683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099878940490011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07940625386477043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280424691233985,0.0,0.0,0.11223774074769552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430655805592825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663371782059071,0.0,0.19620800716344333,0.0,0.05822445703991395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779289864571178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668574695297268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977886704260704,0.0,0.09010082605369336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20351527238883613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06430136215407027
mentalhealth,524360,2020/01/09,"Trying to replace harmful & habitual ""coping"" strategies with something useful I used to think of overeating as a totally isolated thing. Just a bad habit that I needed to break. After some introspection, I've realized that it's just one more strategy on my big list of unhealthy coping strategies.

When I become stressed and anxious I just totally shut down. The following are the aspects of ""shutting down"" that I have identified. 

* I choose to overeat junk food
* I stop trying to manage my environment (I won't do the dishes or tidy up)
* I won't go to bed and don't get enough sleep
* I forget to take my medication due to lack of self-care
* I zone out in front of a game or the TV or YouTube as a form of escape
* I cut off socially and avoid people or any kind of human interaction

As a result of these things, this is what happens.

* I gain weight
* My house becomes an embarrassing cluttered mess
* I feel tired at work, which leads to frustration
* I get withdrawal symptoms from my meds
* Any depression, anxiety or stress grows in intensity.

Clearly this is a flawed system that just keeps repeating itself. I feel anxious and stressed -> I go to my broken coping strategies -> I feel even more anxious and stressed. I'm trying to come up with a list of positive coping strategies that don't result in me digging myself into a deeper hole. Coming up with this list seems very easy to me. I can immediately think of things that will make me feel calm and put me in a better headspace.

* Put on some relaxing music
* Change into something comfortable
* Make a cup of tea
* Write in my journal and do some CBT
* Light a candle
* Do some meditation

The struggle is actually remembering to do these things. Catching myself *before* I shut down rather than expect myself to do them *while* I'm shutting down.",2.314474118034948,5.21592947477745,3.5075212660731943,83.25395581932081,86.59643916913946,6.200303330036267,24.699571381470488,7.554174236665415,1.7241451895812725,1431,58,251,27,45,462,183,337,0.165,0.7490000000000001,0.086,-0.9712,0,1,2,0,0,0,54.0,0,0,1,4,7,18,2,7,17,0,16,9,1,7,3,58,40,17,0,4,10,0,5,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,19,15,5,4,10,3,0,11,4,13,0,1,0,6,35,5,54,37,11,44,0,1,0,0,6,25,0,10,6,173,54,3,0.0,0.0,0.09622633283817608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068407821673562,0.0,0.13411245706715366,0.0,0.07543418314537671,0.33419396226431963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233283319389413,0.0,0.217807651775613,0.08390740330883839,0.0,0.0,0.08720999163720074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431326675821702,0.16988261928177734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493017499664468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188752273959913,0.0,0.0651290781659117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19943490724830912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923613078514833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030363092124361,0.0,0.11208140667477308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719795777980008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11377938665404172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764654623543787,0.0,0.10268414990841357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131642047491857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953029000367176,0.09933630762853753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311593608673267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681874201601448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683617668731381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19825479855141412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170265389823594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976822605517333,0.10286874008992684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867834105201563,0.10051754927406203,0.0,0.1518251695370958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243997447947125,0.4518165286095876,0.10308558025921218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024905621567526,0.07414028857031718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26204077756391875,0.12636693229148474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333438812921626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008433018430574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032979729730718,0.0,0.08136120770863653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007691718795445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178716370814002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,J_123_,2020/01/09,"Mental health and high pressure jobs Everytime im at work i help vulnerable children work on their mental heath, i explain the importance of getting uo and dressed daily, the importance of just leaving the house even if its just for a short period of time, yet every day off i have i sit in the house and struggle to move.  I need to practice what i preach.",2.268586956521741,4.969912579710146,3.33606884057971,86.50671195652174,82.6231884057971,6.348550724637683,26.01630434782609,7.645422480735847,1.7131869565217397,284,12,53,5,8,91,50,69,0.09300000000000001,0.7959999999999999,0.111,0.3182,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,2,4,2,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,4,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,0,10,4,0,12,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,4,33,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619224356413054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13948097889604827,0.0,0.17792644746329075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033171108437817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244721804533399,0.0,0.0,0.14154806206319326,0.2231209940121523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4873417734631484,0.0,0.0,0.2281083173424059,0.0,0.2095614318049196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236068524964414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4256352084223817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22444863511847846,0.0,0.15658570066505434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207689414549046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313950314446424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074799812358769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mister-kai,2020/01/09,"I resent my gf I've been dating this girl for 5 years now. For some context, I was in a dark place before I met her. I felt this hole in my heart that would never go away. I think it was loneliness. This was a time when all my closest friends were leaving to college. I think I had issues with not having someone with me. I thought I need someone to complete me when I was already whole.

When we met, everything was great but I knew something was wrong. She would get intensely mad about things that I would do little things. I realized this when we at a party and this drunk girl started dancing with me. The drunk girl would get close I'd clearly backed away. The drunk girl spilled a drink on her so understand my girls frustration but she treated it as if it were my fault. I didn't 

Shes overly emotional. Nothing wrong with being emotional. But shes unaware of how this is affecting people around her.

Im not sunshine and rainbows either. I'm overly critical of her. Judging her. I get that from my parents. Definitely need to unlearn that behavior. My resentment is manifesting into anger. Anytime she ask me simple questions, its irritating. I take it out her and on others who do not deserve it. I plan on get therapy in 2020. There's a lot other underlying issues I'm not dealing with. 

She comes to my house almost every weekend. I'm beginning to feel used. Like I'm just her escape from her reality. I only say that because any serious conversation has been thrown out the window. 

Now throwing hints towards marriage, but we cannot even talk about finances without her getting upset.

I've ""tried"" breaking up with her multiple times. Ended up just moving past my issues with her everytime.

I have anxiety about this. I know this needs to be addressed. I feel conflicted because I love her, but I thinks it's best if we were no longer together.

I feel like how can I love someone truly when I do not even love myself. 

This has been bugging for months. Keep telling myself I'm going to break up with her and never do it, which ends up making me feel like a coward.",2.640192458996548,5.102415129032259,3.820585850027237,85.17789566059434,78.85111662531017,6.512352478363494,26.4545784663802,7.678348718463194,1.6902154451370817,1639,67,306,26,41,532,209,403,0.154,0.715,0.131,-0.7497,1,0,2,0,0,0,46.0,4,0,0,2,20,21,5,1,9,0,34,8,1,5,4,73,74,20,0,9,16,1,5,3,2,4,0,1,2,5,28,22,4,2,14,6,1,6,11,10,0,0,19,7,65,11,48,49,6,54,0,0,1,3,45,25,0,6,24,223,93,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975378123854809,0.0,0.09891145002021658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06095302414040048,0.0,0.06856844899902513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979173250208098,0.0837940824945773,0.0,0.16842495547604566,0.06892169078359288,0.0,0.1092780121150533,0.0,0.07627046869898185,0.0,0.09406354817072472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721027278570912,0.0939777404372944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240694511952197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780551120539684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20164850204206905,0.15877519192843698,0.0,0.0,0.118402551425959,0.0,0.07551906185542026,0.0,0.08055571389790088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18128309601930276,0.12806663773183946,0.08606104518590828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924967732020511,0.0,0.2341458347757597,0.0,0.10188018079956096,0.0,0.0,0.098819905321948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621468356918724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342361706088386,0.0,0.0,0.0968182435647804,0.28065843991358896,0.0,0.07966928897345199,0.0,0.0,0.049259557097179225,0.0,0.0,0.09490764282504197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313694137754841,0.08983509197957429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620215932354632,0.24268989700559004,0.0,0.0598302430224292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154363089331903,0.09526492885423417,0.0,0.19938360006830855,0.1382598802504871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600459022323663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816938805781325,0.0,0.0,0.09952603986838662,0.0,0.08556415353030454,0.062139737316308515,0.0,0.09364665552381164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004086671062302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127918677092986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22783542037190704,0.0690033083152087,0.0,0.0,0.06344218924220696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06739231981619694,0.07204303159369964,0.07834256357503569,0.0,0.10250232391002413,0.0,0.11909540836035208,0.17229823782859496,0.0,0.07115801843556879,0.1045306067467135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06085443462097743,0.0,0.0,0.0933103647136182,0.0,0.07741351156733847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007123986138126,0.0,0.08640231955267975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546888006403767,0.1959976553191266,0.0,0.057720249722530176
mentalhealth,blankface117,2020/01/09,"I feel like mental illness has been incorrectly framed as a bad thing.. this from a person diagnosed with paranoid schizophrenia. Honestly, it's my superpower. “Your Mental Illness is a Superpower” by TosoThePoet https://link.medium.com/hXRAL0ZZ62",10.801285714285722,15.592911342857144,8.725357142857145,48.09089285714289,64.14285714285714,11.5,40.17857142857143,10.686352973137794,6.572285714285716,207,11,21,7,4,62,30,35,0.27,0.594,0.136,-0.6597,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,3,3,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,2,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952357828104113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3588899350069004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17878748573644046,0.2526072498712966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727479116537009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7126781153726421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30874418446496393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349117936648079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idontthinkincrazy,2020/01/09,"Shame and blame in relationship I got back together with a guy I dated for 9 years about 6 months ago. I love him so much he truly truly is my best friend. He asked me to marry him in November and I accepted. Since the breakup he has improved his communication and has worked on his temper and judgmental issues and even bought a house. 
The current issue is that he needs to know every little thing that I did during the break up. I was single, I dated, I had sex, I did what single people do. I did tell him who I slept with and now he stalks them (not maliciously - but still) online. I refuse to tell him anything more than that now. I don’t even want to know details of what he did when we were apart. I just want the past firmly behind us and move forward and be happy. 
After a couple of talks now about the breakup and the people I spent time with during the break up and seeing the grudge holding and resentful attitude start to creep back I’m feeling very anxious. He shamed me for my choices and for even discussing our breakup with friends. I’m honestly starting to spiral worrying about him digging up boyfriends from decades ago before we even met. I wasn’t an angel when I was younger and the one time he ran into someone I dated I introduced them and they shook hands and afterwards I mentioned that we had dated and he STILL brings it up. That I made him look like an idiot shaking the guys hand like that. That’s why I’m terrified of giving him details about my past at all. 
Any suggestions on how to deal with this?",4.5706281328320815,5.578033766447374,4.999793233082709,85.00021929824564,69.88815789473685,7.764160401002506,26.97619047619048,7.957251820313856,1.5183466791979945,1211,38,242,15,21,385,166,304,0.115,0.742,0.14300000000000002,0.7414,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,5,0,3,2,20,16,3,4,15,0,17,5,3,2,1,40,41,21,0,3,3,0,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,13,25,0,2,4,0,2,6,3,7,0,1,17,5,43,9,36,23,6,46,1,0,2,2,44,13,0,0,29,165,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21255131194218674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152962168500212,0.0,0.0,0.135442090459843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865963042631846,0.0,0.11208139286885037,0.0,0.0,0.18437672140872732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201794818978002,0.0,0.12581763751447844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326565098392824,0.0,0.0,0.1236017963490643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167460633966839,0.0,0.1010128804913179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062021714581067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18525413868620894,0.0,0.0,0.11500985047655532,0.0,0.0,0.09588735031886614,0.0,0.0,0.23742080230559826,0.0,0.12762562037034694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13833749007835516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502689762764517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317773190466476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714484235624845,0.12016173383393244,0.0,0.0,0.10067778833384143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820581788833228,0.11344324883436785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569541861070008,0.12742458178028845,0.08813328035002893,0.08889725441852463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124087615970832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22889801336368396,0.16623389393557844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871748260291258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955371716147552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917462458663298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158279479061444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16971816446288832,0.0,0.19148934696763656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636340761937456,0.2095790868519792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964989206831298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981817871632987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14421345752843004,0.0,0.0,0.09892218261273854,0.14142899507655352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818248928477144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728168026976539,0.1217545782657982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720552326660679
mentalhealth,bbi11,2020/01/09,Confused? Does anyone know what this might be Hey So this is kinda weird but I have these sort of episodes of being kinda manic (idk if that’s the right way to describe it) but for example last night it happened for no reason I just kind of got incredibly weird I was uncontrollably laughing and I kept walking into doors/ tripping over literally everything it’s kind of blurry for some reason but I can remember my mum kept asking if I was drunk and I just suddenly came down and got overwhelming sad again for like no reason the manicness only really lasted about 10 minutes or so but it was fucking weird it’s actually happened a few times. Does anyone know what this is?,2.732325581395348,5.5544653333333365,4.0461705426356565,81.3711162790698,81.71317829457367,6.850852713178295,24.103875968992252,8.021203637495839,1.8156331782945727,544,20,95,11,15,178,83,129,0.18,0.765,0.055,-0.9249,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,6,12,1,3,3,0,10,2,0,3,0,28,21,12,0,2,9,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,12,5,1,2,6,1,0,3,2,8,0,0,8,0,8,4,13,10,2,14,0,2,0,1,3,4,1,9,7,65,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.15539560823029433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22268910665449326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886822882207534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821285351538072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787046019793859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431149562411452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14721513507784262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25471810517405963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28163142636681193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3316486342145656,0.17502866071936585,0.2596042730871681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777967901309987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689288439003015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14943627866730405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110945973670795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201344403740156,0.4911767952794732,0.0,0.0,0.1803882713959969,0.1359903864862511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285432706472536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263975756275703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,smooch1234,2020/01/09,"First psychiatrist appointment First psychiatrist appointment

My doctor recently referred me to a psychiatrist after trying different medications for anxiety and depression without much success.  I am extremely anxious for the appointment and was wondering if anyone has any idea about what I should expect for my first appointment/any tips? I’m a very anxious person and opted for medication from my doctor rather than therapy because I was not ready for that step yet, so the thought of seeing a psychiatrist and having to talk absolutely terrifies me. Any information would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

Edit; also would it be weird for me to bring someone(boyfriend) with me to the appointment as a way to feel more comfortable and for him to add on any information that I forget to say??",9.972124060150376,11.24404270676692,9.791494360902256,54.473406954887245,58.02255639097744,13.868045112781957,41.43703007518797,13.023866798666859,6.450940601503757,652,33,88,24,8,213,84,133,0.162,0.767,0.07200000000000001,-0.8766,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,4,5,6,0,0,7,0,10,4,0,0,0,23,17,9,0,6,4,0,1,0,0,3,4,1,0,1,4,7,0,0,7,0,0,2,2,2,0,3,3,3,12,4,23,9,2,10,0,1,1,0,6,1,0,2,6,72,16,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689414907850525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976094323253183,0.0,0.111821613719816,0.3302667888534995,0.0,0.10220725757971616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891054401636866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258982178322062,0.0,0.0,0.15271922134749202,0.0,0.2992276325247989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390924190691184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.373002932642949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16115577123374578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501103604070247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945069663864168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10745365563063024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763224743040422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14432777559583834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624229227461245,0.0,0.0,0.11648061093204228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748797249577154,0.0,0.13457606085813625,0.16716106951483087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604469062269218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992415780240484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060767626580278,0.0,0.11602497997050605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14090513847926214,0.15851791368766774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076735955072889,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trashbaskets,2020/01/09,"Am I exaggerating things? I'll try to make this short.

I'm a 14 year old boy. I often have moments where I just feel like shit. I can feel just empty, or like I'll never succeed at what I want to do, or guilty that I don't do enough, all of that good stuff. I also feel anxious at school all the time, and have to watch what I do or say every second I spend there.
Because of that, I decided one time at like 2 AM to look up ""teenage depression,"" read multiple articles, and I found that some symptoms match mine. Specifically getting angry and lashing out more often, sleeping too much (12 hours usually), feeling drained all the time, lacking the will to do anything, and, rarely, some weird shoulder pain.

I would try to visit my school counselor, but I just can't seem to find her most of the time. I'm also considering a psychologist, but I'm afraid of what mom will think if I tell her *""I think I have mild depression,""* and God forbid dad heard any of it.

Another issue is that part of me thinks I'm exaggerating, because as you all know, teenagers have those ""phases"" and shit.

Anyway, let me know what you think if you feel like it. Thanks for reading.",4.16745652173913,5.123498473913045,4.894510869565217,85.5748097826087,70.78260869565217,7.836956521739133,27.41847826086957,8.07648339933343,1.5427173913043473,899,30,189,12,16,290,131,230,0.115,0.795,0.09,-0.6813,0,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,3,0,1,11,15,2,1,6,0,18,6,4,1,5,47,41,16,0,5,10,2,5,4,0,3,2,2,0,1,15,7,0,1,15,2,1,1,3,8,0,2,2,9,25,7,20,35,12,18,0,2,2,0,12,7,2,11,14,123,40,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18473174890144406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854444212156117,0.12111256302025612,0.0,0.1304829240597759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09504724137803884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081631910435466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989611810946921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11934310663956485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731432798665866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920031418397641,0.1650274577330482,0.0,0.0,0.10556555463153676,0.0,0.0,0.12664056470863713,0.0,0.0,0.060344352809099035,0.0,0.0,0.0968765139684318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374493152473103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055273111603435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695233701419134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810729933263915,0.0,0.2257112470321289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699150511535937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709761946133448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527303325226553,0.0,0.0,0.08490631005478573,0.0,0.08908126639503776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12119856372563212,0.0,0.07826626891615956,0.0,0.12290089670726287,0.0,0.0,0.12507601129185095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23106392824476785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185079885298808,0.0,0.2337857655497225,0.0,0.10514750665130623,0.0,0.0,0.23711963392488794,0.0,0.0,0.11558412122045858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13222067734680715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004946003332775,0.0,0.0,0.10095270968344916,0.10633753390811104,0.0,0.0,0.07673353816995625,0.2960327598644426,0.0,0.0,0.269397566645328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568347981198718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720771203438722,0.0,0.06812531009293514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204838907922506,0.0,0.0,0.07437866910640116
mentalhealth,tootsieallgrownup,2020/01/09,"Lack of will to improve or satisfaction from any success Hey so I'm making this post because I feel like I don't have anyone I can turn to that will understand and lack any therapy options. 

My problem is my mental and surprisingly physical lack of motivation to improve my life and zero satisfaction from anything positive that happens to me. It's like my body forgot how to function in a society. Mentally, I keep a routine, I think positive and strive to study and work hard. I make a conscious effort to do so, however some time ago I feel like my body stopped listening to me and just keeps me in a stagnant state. 

For example: I struggle to wake up to class. But not in a normal ""I'm lazy"" kind of way. I sleep my 8 hours or more and unconsciously turn off my alarms. I tried putting my phone further. Also didn't work. I asked my roommates to wake me up. I took a shower, sat on a chair to blow dry my hair and fell asleep like that (!). It's extremely troubling. I struggle to clean my house, do laundry, even commute to work or to do groceries. I often catch myself falling asleep in random places even though I slept plenty.

I also struggle remembering things. I have been well prepared for my exams this January but so far it's  been a disaster. I forget everything I've done and learned right when I'm in the class. The only thing I can focus on is that I want to get out of the room. When working out  (I'm trying to lose weight) I feel extremely weak and redundant to continue pushing myself even though I have barely started my exercise. I eat well and care to not strain my body so I don't know why is this happening.

The worst of them all is probably that I can't be arsed to care. I tried so many ""advices"" from so many people that failed nonetheless. I only feel like everything I'll try will end up being yet another failure. I feel no satisfaction from completing tasks or getting something right for a change. My self esteem is very low and I feel I'm lying to myself when I try to think positively about my appearance/personality, like I don't care to live or die. 

Revising and studying is twice as long as normal for me because my thought process is so slow. I can't seem to feel a kick from it anymore.

My wit and humor also faltered. I often catch myself being very obnoxious and silly without a reason. I don't feel happy or accomplished in the slightest. Any attempt to improve seems to be fruitless because my mind says ""go on"" but my body will start randomly hurting or feeling strained/fatigued. 

What do I do from here? 

I have no therapy or mental health aid available. I'm too poor to afford a private therapy.",4.1692302742302765,5.638550083011586,5.353706563706567,80.33595733095734,71.33590733590735,8.401623601623603,30.84961884961885,8.914623046629139,2.6312609048609046,2085,91,394,40,39,692,247,518,0.157,0.705,0.139,-0.9527,3,0,1,0,0,0,56.0,0,0,1,11,29,30,0,5,17,0,36,17,11,5,1,76,81,44,1,7,15,0,12,6,0,4,4,2,3,1,16,17,2,4,21,1,1,8,12,13,2,2,9,14,66,17,61,64,7,47,0,4,0,0,7,22,0,16,20,262,82,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520922918647089,0.059153429993994075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16009541950233402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361390825974022,0.06997377440184098,0.0,0.0,0.06617969611687972,0.04666020186467602,0.0,0.05491432151916282,0.0,0.06238492499637195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203667108577868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964945195759263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20411157149743586,0.0,0.07059305675132467,0.0,0.06996668635745883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925673990317424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682894719312382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828296278856526,0.0,0.0,0.05910428364903399,0.0,0.0,0.13222653802371198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994790133002442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3036729686164162,0.14301894629531933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972888731919208,0.0,0.03792503747629635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802085340528655,0.0710369005115416,0.05977829799545985,0.0,0.0,0.07093244192122601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571706501276174,0.07699916749627607,0.07143742869341359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862800973910605,0.0,0.06949056670565025,0.036673875808126415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0471344172673612,0.1956097800994788,0.0,0.05892511874110785,0.05905525920501335,0.0,0.07465545601166525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08908756113441539,0.13531049204715795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20174890696973427,0.0,0.06737977102009937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076536242969214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150459398634663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046263205424118485,0.058267353714094985,0.06972019272831277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06391031082167391,0.0,0.07194782120151093,0.06385301334393365,0.0,0.06708356798853664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861107476485369,0.0,0.0,0.07559375744783291,0.11397663730267167,0.0,0.053067550692432436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214996648713316,0.06961548643603803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667796719103592,0.0,0.0,0.05137315291953229,0.0,0.0,0.0944657689339064,0.0,0.0,0.05579050467757152,0.0,0.20928669315905293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289397866309175,0.0,0.08866685924335607,0.08551767478838819,0.13112667906660574,0.0529773405333329,0.03891166218175958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414112879866404,0.22653147015315664,0.14516937396016671,0.0,0.06946982329474037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012091810804422,0.039359955405296985,0.05296834212136425,0.0,0.08126096414199067,0.11999922791991732,0.0,0.06021478059117648,0.0,0.0,0.06432676466330796,0.0,0.19432524660210285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,juaninthamiddle,2020/01/09,"Questioning everything nowadays What advice or strategies do y'all use for when you're in existential crisis/questioning every thing in life? For the past 4 months I've been questioning everything from asking myself if I'm actually enjoying activities that I like like playing/listening to music or hanging out with friends to just simply watching a movie or working towards my goals. I question if there's truly a purpose to what we do in life. I do suffer from GAD but its under control by lifestyle changes. (medication made sleepy and gave me suicidal ideation) These questioning thoughts came after an anxiety crisis from back in May of 2019 due to work-induced stress, ever since, things have not been the same. Right now my main concern is how much I question the enjoyment of things. I can be jamming with my bass guitar and a couple friends and start to think ""I'm i really enjoying this."" I was never like this before and I want to change this.

Any books, advice, lifestyle changes that can help me stop questioning everything?

Im a 20 year old male college student and I also work part-time btw.",6.539359605911328,8.02424537438424,6.45711822660099,74.5943472906404,65.69950738916256,9.54384236453202,35.1896551724138,9.784248007369934,3.676000985221675,893,42,147,19,14,282,136,203,0.13,0.723,0.147,0.5661,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,1,0,4,8,10,0,1,8,0,12,3,0,4,2,36,23,14,1,3,8,0,0,3,2,1,3,0,0,1,12,10,0,2,8,2,0,2,2,2,0,0,7,1,17,8,24,14,3,23,0,1,1,0,14,8,0,12,16,97,29,6,0.0,0.0,0.0937611070150822,0.0,0.0,0.1877783038890524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683586794283544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533831264398082,0.0,0.07350163214037575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898226796284146,0.0,0.0,0.07388028803947998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175777657689631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989096326164516,0.0,0.0,0.30492258446732856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776290898839584,0.0,0.10631169794490536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691068261937793,0.08095230948219784,0.0,0.2590539761142786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846374338441878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440100777659308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378386892019338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135729574474103,0.1408208362122895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091407891387722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679140725133524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669086462758287,0.0,0.0706305230766097,0.0,0.07410351995921759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082075109083972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404626106327226,0.09172009909800484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6457956410931074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155189038027933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205257101901837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947912051679336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800656167572197,0.0,0.0,0.08032794185859014,0.11006035624725537,0.0,0.0,0.10509691951222797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149565921423026,0.06156476669268305,0.0,0.07627750913490275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298305609914164,0.0,0.0,0.05667100929854901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20984413746912955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187295504112038
mentalhealth,rose9898,2020/01/09,"I’m extremely concerned for my friend’s mental health especially after her boyfriend dumped her last week. Any advice? She’s 22 and comes from a long history of trauma. Her dad is a bad alcoholic and used to be very verbally and emotionally abusive to her family when she was young. They fled from her father about 12 years ago, but she so clearly has dependency and mental health issues because of this. 

Since her dad left, she has had about 7 boyfriends back to back. She is never single and needs a boyfriend for reassurance and support. I’ve always tried to explain to her that this is not healthy and she needs to learn how to be alone, but she is so incapable of being alone because of what her dad did to her. She’s also been cheated on more times than I can count and has trust issues and insecurities from this too. 

In general, her mental health has been so terrible lately I feel so bad. She has been very depressed and anxious and sees a therapist for trauma. She has been cutting herself on and off since she was younger. She apparently made suicide comments to her roommates while she was drunk recently. She would freak out on her boyfriend all the time and she became very controlling with him. He was really patient but he finally had enough and he broke up with her out of the blue last week.

Since they’ve broken up, she has not cried once even though she was head over heals with him. I think she is in a state of emotional shock and denial and her brain can’t even rationalize it. She seems okay from the outside, but as her best friend, I know she’s dying on the inside (she holds everything in). I’m genuinely fearful of what she may do when this break up sets in. I’ve been trying to keep her busy and I’ve been all ears to listen to her this past week. What else can I do? I can sense a major breakdown coming when she realizes this break up is permanent and comes out of this state of shock. Any advice for dealing with this would be helpful. I am so concerned for her wellbeing",4.4886683129023695,5.945210506393861,4.72761090043214,85.18222506393866,70.53452685421995,8.05294999559044,26.781991357262545,8.53829466247534,1.7398031748831464,1592,52,317,26,29,499,186,391,0.188,0.731,0.081,-0.9937,1,2,1,0,0,1,32.0,0,0,1,2,18,22,3,2,10,1,41,9,3,5,4,58,60,35,2,4,6,4,1,0,2,3,5,2,0,0,13,28,2,3,7,1,0,4,4,15,0,0,16,5,53,7,56,37,7,50,0,2,2,0,60,18,0,3,23,221,66,1,0.0,0.1069650226808948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17643781917294418,0.08002626556813455,0.09648004695297993,0.0,0.18700218387530634,0.0,0.07219552362185641,0.07511877736134218,0.0,0.0,0.12278467908790265,0.0,0.0,0.101988781920018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13883687978411613,0.1507572185788552,0.1100656270803252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474150576522998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078043924740936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23330028411172196,0.0,0.0,0.10125478958889203,0.0,0.0,0.09916647303469776,0.0,0.09307296284314752,0.07775656721150663,0.0,0.09369462194225027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541593510796088,0.20310187198227056,0.0,0.09328161645997476,0.0,0.11925593098168588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113631455649767,0.0,0.08510634635701175,0.10158818597938807,0.045647420867749255,0.0,0.0,0.09889546450966036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949758074540594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265158074176316,0.2878848328065161,0.0,0.0,0.060511641277554214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884541796139284,0.0,0.0802435007755664,0.0,0.0,0.049614592511911665,0.14717772701491932,0.10183785426300214,0.0,0.098087636731881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798934543071341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854235099767382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27293787712530065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338804305721696,0.06962819017881944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614344277347583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618085222848673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783459047050085,0.0,0.08913892965952869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194011645856499,0.08218597339511621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.224037427168137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874980706763653,0.10244674460849076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482006410518746,0.0,0.057846689144482114,0.08869797104848501,0.0,0.1052840050617925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258607889251437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797146498399188,0.0,0.22346715578494505,0.0,0.0,0.2172474194537072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826222773573612,0.0,0.0,0.058136265091045775
mentalhealth,realityinblack,2020/01/09,"closeted trans girl ​

i'm 17 years old. 

i have identified as trans for years now with a family that choses not to support me and often tells me they wish i didn't exist as i ""ruined their lives"". after years of simply brushing everything under the rug, my mental health is suffering and declining insanely fast. i now suffer from (untreated) dissociation, depression, anxiety and ocd. i lock myself in my bedroom for hours and have depressive episodes daily. 

a few months back i secretly bought a wig and an eyeshadow palette but since my mum constantly invades my privacy, she found it hidden deep in a draw and i was petrified. she immediately told me to throw it out and threatened to tell the rest of my family. my grandfather who has passed away was a priest, so my mum is very religious.

i have no support system. i am bullied relentlessly at school and honestly i don't think i can go back after these holidays. i go to a conservative catholic school in australia and i have one friend who oddly enough is also trans. we have notified our school about the harassment we face only for it to backfire as they called my mum (even though i pleaded with them not to) and not to my suprise my mum blamed me for ""giving people a reason"" to harass me. and the harassment didn't even stop since dozens of people join in. 

my sister was diagnosed with depression a few years ago and my mum immediately took it very seriously. but for me it's just so different. she knows i get bullied & suffer but choses not to support me. i asked to visit a therapist and all she could say was ""you have bigger issues, do your homework"". i'm so exhausted and i don't know what to do.

Thanks for reading. <3",4.9849251805985535,6.575988972136222,5.879183436532513,76.88253160474717,69.49535603715171,9.717698658410734,29.557404540763677,10.02789654360092,3.0695676986584104,1350,52,246,35,24,444,176,323,0.207,0.7170000000000001,0.076,-0.9941,1,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,3,2,4,0,14,18,3,0,14,0,23,4,1,1,1,40,42,25,0,2,8,6,0,0,1,0,3,1,4,1,10,20,0,2,6,2,1,6,9,12,0,2,10,2,50,6,38,31,5,34,1,7,0,0,32,10,0,1,17,177,60,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09134800362050158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240940529179659,0.0,0.22331023269540629,0.12521757262511107,0.0,0.0,0.07883330994804719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963382572238314,0.0,0.096819287236743,0.15847886574665535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522602819046792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136092394202766,0.0,0.08227739669521691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662715971835665,0.10459403458247328,0.0,0.10766578401987198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647865894550758,0.0,0.13612769679732625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261509709647536,0.0,0.1942935804877442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298949623460736,0.07961651977957965,0.0,0.05383960534438847,0.0988553788892472,0.11713188773817915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953780638061138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148393243340248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755789339573124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326766141671565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099543273564556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385061292402194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225388369367796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813410925025006,0.0,0.0698296499020274,0.07837450862869456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288440947574674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307833398576582,0.0,0.0,0.10595302261699288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194985165316117,0.0,0.3128776621107833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704887894225892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615478804515397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508212784003022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18014126574521722,0.09487500639902384,0.0,0.11964951166226302,0.0,0.06603056548859222,0.10124654103182867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846911830649313,0.11449283841386836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17005482229936486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850292843732367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521757262511107,0.2654444370891107
mentalhealth,twotwo1234,2020/01/09,"help Please help.i don't believe in God and it makes life for me unbearable.i am not mentally strong to live in a world of chaos  because of lack of God,but it seems i cant believe in God neither.i can't live life like this till i probably die,at 70 or how much is the life expectancy...i cant accept life if it has no meaning,i've tried...the only hope is to  believe in God,but i cant,i also come with arguments in opposition to  the proof that God exists...i think it is a lie people tell themself to feel better so that they can go through life and i am the only one who sees the truth  as it is,me the great smartass, but the truth that i think i see scares me and want not to exist,because then i see no purpose...i will try one more time with an psychologist and a priest but then if i cant change my thinking to believe in God,i will probably kill myself...i feel like this will happen for sure,for those who believe in God ,i feel like satan caught me tight in his claws ,it made me handicapped in this society,i dont do anything and i make the lifes of my parents hell also, i'm like a parazite ive become coward and hide from it in the house of my parents and that is not right for them.I ve entered on this site for an advice,what should i do,ive tried to believe in the proof of God but i believe more in the opposition of His existence.and please also dont say that life is without God,and yes there is no meaning,but just the meaning you give to life,there is a bigger NO,i cant accept that there is no way.sorry if i sounded harsh or bad  i didnt intend it in the slightest way..",4.330764705882352,4.006692311764708,5.3388235294117665,87.06470588235297,70.0,8.329411764705883,28.470588235294123,7.734863291789972,1.4635764705882348,1246,39,284,13,20,412,151,340,0.21899999999999997,0.726,0.055,-0.9948,2,0,0,0,0,1,43.0,0,1,1,2,8,16,2,1,19,1,27,7,0,5,4,47,49,24,1,7,13,2,4,4,0,4,7,2,0,0,21,10,0,1,10,0,0,4,17,4,0,2,3,9,26,12,40,42,4,27,3,0,3,0,12,18,1,7,8,170,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17932657703420146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06151079986422405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06241101621144125,0.09113072927170723,0.08255270928142824,0.0,0.5895036237464688,0.0,0.06610806394881402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907291332224296,0.06438832780762001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757607395633931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520695900981578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338370198031072,0.10679921665842956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170458539636464,0.04248071041419698,0.0,0.0,0.08240935083142542,0.0,0.0,0.06609894188608177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020330861381513,0.0,0.0,0.0742411046076997,0.0,0.08624854592663116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269700207508726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4223707953835327,0.1460713550651835,0.0,0.13200677293609506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072786452620562,0.09978903484073114,0.0,0.0,0.08142190906110923,0.0,0.0,0.07532787013257126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494799185404238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013016418703506,0.11369764012862695,0.0,0.0,0.1659964419041932,0.0,0.0,0.051820484915349636,0.0,0.0,0.16410055417030994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611808325465252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638339319541207,0.0,0.05944218920719426,0.07483525842909365,0.0,0.17869217077124586,0.06804729042188762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367367429372803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07044860696469965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533258441864187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368548403880574,0.0,0.0,0.043585851534399485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149725272433224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044087995128104365,0.11866212679073287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205389482481396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mhthrowaway7382,2020/01/09,"I feel like I’m in exactly the same place that I was this time last year, even though I improved a lot this last year I’ve felt myself slipping back down into that black hole recently and the only person I want to talk to about it is someone I haven’t seen or spoken to in months If I start expanding on the title it’ll turn into a badly written rambling and emotional mess of a novel so I’m just not gonna do that",10.839999999999995,4.772407000000001,10.794444444444444,71.10500000000003,62.33333333333334,13.777777777777779,40.0,9.725611199111238,3.682,330,9,72,4,3,112,66,90,0.066,0.8059999999999999,0.128,0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,6,0,5,0,0,0,1,14,15,6,0,2,4,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,4,7,1,11,9,2,16,0,0,2,0,2,7,0,3,10,47,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17780817778526353,0.1930745372927035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26011225416544537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15273088685737432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692116298943342,0.16519687221315713,0.2220252789626045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3769805759361888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297147924727415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965907530499468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457241104582486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17586734355306555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20190858977167275,0.2415950767466823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283201794384158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959276800026508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636718417034257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18586079395561408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22719070941243544,0.0,0.13483706288329825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515211495459032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363904928367636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297820100110389
mentalhealth,KennyRogers92,2020/01/09,"My finacè is having a bad time, and I don't know how to help anymore... Good day redditors.  
My wife graduated as a lector about 2 years ago, and have worked as teacher for 1st and 2nd year kids since. She puts very much effort in it, and I know for a fact that she is a fantastic teacher. She has been having a lot of headaches almost since she started working, and she has tried different treatments, some work a little bit, some don't. The last  5-6 months she has been having a hard time coping with all of it.   


She comes home from work very tired and goes straight to bed to get away for a bit, I often follow her, and try to comfort her, and sometimes (about once a week) she cries to me, talking about how afraid she is that the headaches will never stop, and that she will go mad if this (her troubles in general) continues. She has also started to gain weight, because of medication and less excercise (she is the strongest woman I know, and quite fit, but she has gained about 5kgs of fat) and she hates it, on top of all the other things.)  


I try to say to her that she should try lowering the bar a bit, do the necessary work and not so much extra. And take time to relax once in a while. Lately she has been having trouble sleeping aswell, which makes it all worse. I try to talk to her about how she might get more calm and tired in the evening, and repeat that she should try to get a little less amount of stress from work.   
I also tell her that it is more important that she feels well, and enjoy life than the couple of kgs she gains. 

On top of all this I DO listen, and I use a lot of time just listening and make her feel ""seen"". But like I said, lately, she's been having a even harder time lately, and cries even more than usual and my help has started to have less effect.  


I don't know any more guidance to give her, or how to help or comfort her anymore.   
If anyone have some advice on how to deal with this, maybe even some nice, bright ""views on life"" that I can try to share with her, or any other knowledge to share with me!  That would be amasing.  
Thanks",6.546500000000003,5.16126331666667,6.2857142857142865,85.61928571428574,65.83333333333334,9.142857142857146,28.809523809523807,7.447530270364453,1.4160952380952383,1603,37,353,12,21,501,189,420,0.08,0.7559999999999999,0.16399999999999998,0.9879,2,0,0,0,0,0,59.0,0,0,0,14,20,20,2,2,22,0,37,9,2,9,6,71,63,39,0,5,9,1,4,1,0,6,6,4,2,2,21,26,3,1,8,2,0,4,5,7,1,0,6,11,48,13,54,50,24,43,0,0,3,0,48,15,0,14,25,248,69,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732039581248762,0.0664057107597516,0.0,0.07501438595589227,0.0,0.0,0.11981553870460253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188659719849337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14858681090688985,0.0523807980252691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038307712688208,0.0,0.06254909048185313,0.045666170629090966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453562499865267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453077655985565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288963020074504,0.16457646945427373,0.04831258301986517,0.0772318463973932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826797115400656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19791689148389024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575636337776112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174165975680796,0.07186322018417593,0.04257469210930585,0.06283333416143971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710718832026794,0.07396091811047102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063748832015306,0.0,0.07514368436910099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16468054613913402,0.06106396131973248,0.25351483215813503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582630559896937,0.03659862857314011,0.15016468764091664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737643163971438,0.0,0.0,0.10000980192669012,0.0,0.07526001457617583,0.0,0.0,0.07546680288965668,0.0,0.0794706825665499,0.0,0.0,0.059794712450647824,0.0,0.11013911078232247,0.0,0.05777739876919565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15955945480990644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07530809308997283,0.0,0.07967902424221536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125926364942321,0.05957369542844632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393734717192817,0.0,0.07496693899171475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409071213624963,0.0,0.15907107658404845,0.0,0.0,0.06263048680584604,0.08581240263724373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05632513103507999,0.12042420280965868,0.06547712218577527,0.06896967622234028,0.0,0.0,0.04976876074208821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184113908766951,0.17220257393803695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35602629638042665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06470063940235618,0.0825059072705012,0.12362187344374692,0.0,0.0,0.06009055983943416,0.09122365484840797,0.06735563788484121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32722462891383064,0.0,0.07634258173781479,0.05321593064447695,0.0,0.0,0.09648282290522037
mentalhealth,jessnowak313,2020/01/09,"Anyone here in the field with a LPC or similar license? I have been in the mental health field for about three years post grad and have my LPC in CT. Looking for advice/would love to hear what you all do who are in the field. I’m feeling a little stuck I have been doing child outpatient therapy for a while now and am wondering where too next. Private, school, hospital, ect, ect.. student loans are a killer and I don’t enjoy working late nights. Help a girl out!!",2.316328502415459,4.568546478260871,3.018405797101451,91.62900966183577,78.78260869565217,6.262801932367151,22.17874396135266,7.3871296695380915,0.7707859903381641,364,11,75,5,9,114,67,92,0.064,0.805,0.131,0.7333,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,5,2,0,0,8,0,11,2,0,0,1,9,18,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,2,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,3,5,2,11,15,1,14,0,0,1,1,7,7,0,2,6,48,7,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732283493728101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526679887623704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633402630068544,0.279225468078658,0.0,0.16605756587097492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794659975403783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483045500907674,0.0,0.0,0.2080425451493329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235986122262378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24966765927198334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634785306204005,0.2324909402067515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372702476438093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507301316068937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28331682932459845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686677755023326,0.18036056620573024,0.0,0.0,0.17599021346397908,0.0,0.0,0.15953899887739076
mentalhealth,Emptycans_fryingpans,2020/01/09,Help needed(advice) I feel very paranoid about being abandoned and am constantly prepping myself for being abandoned by my friends and thus not trusting anybody. I have very intrusive thoughts and I'm convinced they are going to leave me because I'm not good enough and I have a lot of issues etc. I don't know what to do with this paranoia and it isn't going away.,3.4865714285714304,6.103837942857144,3.649999999999999,86.70500000000001,76.71428571428572,5.7142857142857135,30.0,6.868970318607317,1.7911428571428574,296,14,52,3,7,91,51,70,0.21600000000000005,0.672,0.11199999999999999,-0.7102,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,9,0,0,1,0,15,16,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,2,3,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,1,1,8,4,8,13,3,4,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,39,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476108714649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23806929994194234,0.0,0.0,0.1544648758834194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27382578368853383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618207644095705,0.2825980815887633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812216467161686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19576935204440526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.288016027700356,0.21253245080298952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984272760501484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26447449795141864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13925713372379073,0.0,0.0,0.2683046110671073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154240702981952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20116424654921244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4181484252984376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MsAllAlone,2020/01/09,"How do I stop worrying about whatever mental illness I might have? I experienced anxiety and issues with obsession as a child. Later, pounds of social anxiety and more obsession that seemed to be triggered by change (graduating high school). Then, panic attacks, derealization, and a ridiculously long list of physical sensations ranging from tingling all the way to ear popping and jaw pain. Now, I just realized I’ve been depressed for years, abit since highschool but progressing terribly within the last 4 years. I have a diagnosis of GAD but my therapist has noted I have symptoms of panic, definitely depression, and a lot of social anxiety. 
I have had some brief hallucinations in the past. I had a crappy month of sleep, high anxiety and some depression, had a auditory hallucination in my head one morning after being woken up and still tired. 

My therapist is aware of everything that I’ve experienced but she says she’s not concerned for several reasons. I can’t stop wondering and fearing over what’s going on with me. I wonder and obsess constantly. My life has already been so hard I’m just afraid of it getting any worse. And I’m afraid something else is going on besides just anxiety and depression. 

I can’t stop thinking. 😓
Anyone relate? Any advice?",6.213866666666667,8.539803475555555,7.1685555555555585,65.93150000000003,67.57777777777778,10.866666666666667,35.16666666666667,10.864195022040775,4.754733333333334,1022,51,154,33,18,341,141,225,0.319,0.667,0.013999999999999999,-0.9971,0,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,8,16,2,8,9,0,19,10,4,3,1,36,29,18,0,0,7,0,1,0,0,1,6,3,0,1,4,13,0,3,6,0,0,3,3,16,0,1,6,6,18,0,26,20,5,28,0,4,0,0,6,9,0,7,15,105,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012822377059682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307336618791115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936027866297376,0.0,0.3919296168956771,0.0,0.0,0.07164634809786727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656944191853134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10839504578154972,0.0,0.0,0.11072894005468233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35301397389210404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559688236632503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092089497568221,0.0,0.0,0.11530231631601325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05353406043802257,0.0,0.11646715307969688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178907453726884,0.0,0.1051592935425872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165211191060638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694749207023307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835231610415271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237450186609763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067885454681897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711261096404695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326125076954586,0.10869983660789972,0.0,0.0,0.08178708504181831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943335996445449,0.0,0.10903065035808464,0.2404426691633861,0.0,0.0,0.09781503418171801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535172908655904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148477841219111,0.0,0.10370068382439482,0.0,0.09328085751098887,0.0,0.1157569916251165,0.0,0.08476062462357431,0.0,0.1025396253841129,0.20890160367933944,0.0,0.07888304486192634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818291812315307,0.2569975541647436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650101873338984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379409784947497,0.0,0.06565583571818535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776916370920393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133244448449706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222392008699832,0.0,0.1040588169363222,0.10442122671057308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196900726860944
mentalhealth,Luna387,2020/01/09,"Memory loss, forgetting words, stuttering It's been going on for quite some time but it has gotten worse lately. I'm only 22 years old.

I can go fill up a cup of water, leave it on the counter and comeback a few minutes later to fill up another one forgetting I had done one and left it on the counter.

I can walk somewhere and forget why I'm heading that way then turn around.

I forget words so often, everytime I say a sentence I'm stuck with the ""hummmm the hmmm"". It's getting a bit frustrating.

When in a conversation if the other person asks to hold on a second I'm very likely to forget what I had in my head.

If someone new tells me their name it will take a few times before I remember it if I don't note it on my phone.

As a kid I'd ask the same question more than once, don't know if this matters. I don't think I am asking the same question over and over now, at least I haven't had people angry at me like I had as a kid.

I have a pretty good long term memory

What is this? Thanks!",2.3193485915492964,3.3152915070422573,4.338025234741785,87.6721082746479,75.24413145539907,7.390727699530518,22.70217136150235,7.865858978985527,0.9274227699530512,773,20,172,11,16,266,127,213,0.107,0.785,0.10800000000000001,0.5098,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,2,5,7,1,0,17,0,17,3,2,0,0,30,34,14,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,3,14,6,1,1,5,0,0,5,4,3,0,3,8,1,18,4,23,25,9,33,0,1,0,0,14,15,0,8,14,113,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480393373214697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567996007692062,0.3959521849833005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201336173630027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413178398189833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444759591311632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376062216978999,0.0,0.16047147560286826,0.11841492387129253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897824246907927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758872974990004,0.0,0.1592569716424611,0.14948903084583146,0.1533922733794322,0.0,0.0,0.13794664485405356,0.0,0.0,0.12493968651529234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635233733645372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14814445843455284,0.1503518868321907,0.19133418195492008,0.10737360502042786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787630197026126,0.1232727619032561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363061876399133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163073886873859,0.15016210289809984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599291999592732,0.0,0.0,0.112271849059703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962119231547752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061496448115073,0.0,0.12339737405974124,0.12997939816964482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046231972740967,0.0,0.0,0.16464616158573342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15356308920124714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648812631091825,0.0,0.11206195940828584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739281669277705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14387428464951807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091516693873376
mentalhealth,throwin1taway,2020/01/09,"I only like ""impossible men"" and anyone who shows interest in me I push away..? I only like guys that show no interest in me or are in a relationship. I don't chase after them, I just have internal crushes on them. Anyone who shows interest in me I find annoying and dislike, even if I found them attractive initially. It's like I want to be loved, but when it comes to reality I think of every reason to dislike them. I am definitely not a-sexual. What could this be? How can I fix it?

​

I am 27, female.",2.4462998921251327,4.277014708737863,5.255857605177997,77.76451995685007,76.66990291262134,9.23797195253506,26.00755124056095,9.725611199111238,2.673656742179073,397,15,79,12,9,143,67,103,0.102,0.696,0.20199999999999999,0.8069,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,4,0,5,9,1,0,1,0,9,1,0,2,0,15,14,7,0,3,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,8,3,0,0,4,3,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,0,19,8,11,10,0,10,0,0,0,1,10,6,0,2,5,59,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23783835112030616,0.2667279563947742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069721628910632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062363139842266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18908791771426087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752604001013543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498389329181452,0.0,0.18494614302954426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006276215415473,0.0,0.0,0.2406807350830893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21734882446587794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217236257031739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19811581032504444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33389359147797576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22569222996431434,0.0,0.2356709543584124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406527648087595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947233572950706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667279563947742,0.0
mentalhealth,InaMinorKey,2020/01/09,"HELP I’m currently trapped in an ER [serious] I need to quick.

university of north Carolina chapel hill Er psych ward.


I was brought here by force. Police broke into my house, tAckled, choked, and handcuffed me. Brought to unc in handcuffs on back off car. Day 2 or 3.

I’ve done nothing wrong. I just want to get out of here. It only makes my mental health so so soooooooo much worse.

Call 984 974 3303
Pass code for me, Chandler  Blancaflor is    13!


This entire experience has been absolutely disturbing, appalling, and traumatic.

I’ve been through this below and the patters always follows trauma including sexual harassment and assault.

I  scared and alone. The people here are ducking awful. I feel so infantlozwd and dehumanized.


This is not treatment. it is captivity.

I being treated like a criminal.

The staff are nurses before human beings.

Wr are patients before we are human beings.

One of these nurses had the gall to tell me that I’ve refused to take responsibility for my part In this.


There is a severe lack of humanity to here and it is absolutely disgusting.

I’m stunned. I am livid.

Yet the more I show any emotion whatsoever, the more likely I stay longer.

These people don’t know me.

I’ve attempted to get contact withy therapist who knows about my history with in patient facilities. She can vouch for why this is bad for me.

PLEASE HELP. PLEASE HELP ANY WAY YPU CAN WHATSOEVER. I AM DESPERATE. PLEASR HELP",2.308107869142354,5.234934352490424,3.5671264367816096,81.40782493368702,90.53256704980845,6.661597406424992,25.466254052460947,7.793537801064563,2.1634174476864136,1130,49,195,26,39,366,169,261,0.23399999999999999,0.685,0.081,-0.992,1,2,0,0,0,0,40.0,1,0,0,1,13,13,3,2,9,1,24,1,0,1,0,22,38,11,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,12,11,0,1,3,1,0,5,2,10,2,1,7,1,21,3,28,28,5,22,1,1,0,0,14,10,0,1,7,121,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14913279399974552,0.0,0.0,0.11981328685671147,0.0,0.0,0.19583966211807485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072133684929727,0.12022771475913167,0.0,0.0,0.2450540072497487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470324318349854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286324398712713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735431061466514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619721706324646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085228542280176,0.0,0.0,0.07280692954290861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15046026613286945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15305728370606714,0.0,0.0,0.3860605238385623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661480009062236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826901378636354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406949147547871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611610533847627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451105627415092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058510482962434,0.10676860697215156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13816467786016134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757303792457322,0.10951277735856699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592983493703202,0.0,0.1996525247393874,0.0,0.0,0.3161210282454372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416160239816106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16267052811003538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15347683575866228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826443255511403,0.0,0.12585578317376314,0.0,0.0,0.16718637935974676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493050144554458,0.11429453643388045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12993082581983365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14674064915160634,0.0,0.15743318373021933,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ifuckedyowife,2020/01/09,"Can someone help me? So I have been wanting to vent for a long time. Whatever I have said here is of utmost truth and I want to know if something's wrong with me..

I am a very introvert person and an extreme privacy freak. I do not have any social media like Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat etc. I have only 5 friends that I count as such. Now more about me, I have problems when it comes to showing empathy to others, I have felt empathy on very rare occasions. Also I have done some stuff that would be considered horrible in the past like being physically abusive to animals, people, lying and being manipulative. I love to manipulate and get my things done from people. I have no guilt or remorse of what I have done and I still do it and would do it again except hurting others physically. I haven't been in trouble with the law till date. Now this is one side of me..

When it comes to my family or the people who are close to me, Idk if I'd say love but I definitely have a lot of appreciation and I look up to them. I have felt love and also showed love genuinely. I can feel sad, angry. I have cried as well. Something's can melt my heart like a cute baby or a small puppy. I can be very affectionate towards them. I do have a sense of what is right and what is wrong and there are somethings that I wouldn't do again like abuse animals. I don't know if I would die for anyone but I would certainly kill someone to protect the ones I care for.

I honestly feel that I'm completely normal but I just wanted to be sure. I feel like I have two personalities in me. Anyone can help me out? I can't really afford therapy but maybe some alternative ways to find a solution?",1.984962683211944,4.158319353115728,3.9743296466145135,84.75753079759016,79.50445103857567,7.4082906213470014,23.26850103407967,8.391295532112219,1.5234162215628095,1310,44,269,28,33,445,170,337,0.14300000000000002,0.642,0.215,0.981,2,0,3,0,1,0,34.0,0,0,2,0,16,27,1,1,12,0,49,5,1,2,3,56,70,28,2,13,13,0,5,5,1,5,0,2,0,2,17,16,0,1,8,2,0,2,6,9,1,3,8,8,44,18,35,52,5,26,0,2,1,4,15,11,0,9,17,202,61,0,0.0,0.21571428853181052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559531352347302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619043707658288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730233145971434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281242504725347,0.0,0.0,0.15683072073496354,0.09544453240522796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999935522881425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447606425431747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794697186334078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015239054150537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581615977735732,0.0,0.13808440370046413,0.06503274231827788,0.17480854887237787,0.0,0.08320091221600384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033051699567107,0.0,0.04756007031200237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787246810423723,0.122032654403496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745083457347137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007125893749476,0.0,0.10005678731477824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22236634994283852,0.0,0.0,0.0805597905851254,0.07644332217045283,0.0,0.0,0.07739151240561526,0.3286370244895316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914531248322848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919129604150251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337026016291483,0.06923336672336612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689962736227037,0.18932881800545373,0.15896995039379774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710461104503671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05831694895765696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774018907295342,0.08659156353725142,0.07239170275769373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279489429707853,0.15426096336968756,0.2102409080888671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269767286661917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10420900081915413,0.0,0.0,0.0857958746658155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104102166433436,0.0,0.06047711676015444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05308105321829798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892430270156243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253309414245872,0.16107776720865294,0.07225636812675497,0.0,0.0,0.08184802506788935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586639492805081,0.19905676043506335,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lokhammer,2020/01/09,"Anxiety related to my artwork and feelings of inadequacy have me questioning if I even enjoy this hobby at all. So, for the past 4 years I've been pursuing a hobby in illustration, and I like to think I've done some quick improvement on my art.

However, recently I've been having some troubling thoughts and anxiety related to my drawing.

I've never been very consistent with this hobby. I can spend literally a dozen hours straight working in a piece, but then take a whole month or even more to pick up the pencil again. I know I have it in me to draw every day, I've done month long challenges before, but outside of those challenges my mood just isn't in the right place most of the time, and I think I've figured out why.

Before starting a project I feel some anxiety, which I have reasons to belive are linked to feelings of inadequacy; I'm predicting my art piece won't be as good as I envision it, or I won't be able to pull it off at all. I see these artists posting multiple drawings a day and I just feel worse that I can't push myself to do a simple doodle because it might suck ass. It's gotten so bad that I'm starting to question whether I actually like drawing or not. 

Has anyone experienced something similar? How can I break free of these chains, so I can properly improve and enjoy my craft?",7.44623076923077,6.284465623076925,8.049230769230771,72.97576923076926,63.92307692307693,11.384615384615385,38.07692307692308,10.560738912317856,3.9229230769230767,1042,47,201,22,13,349,145,260,0.13699999999999998,0.763,0.1,-0.8912,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,11,12,1,0,11,0,22,1,1,3,3,41,38,20,0,1,10,0,4,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,13,8,0,0,13,3,2,2,6,3,0,1,7,6,25,9,29,26,10,33,0,0,1,1,2,13,2,11,18,137,38,5,0.13622332836910214,0.0,0.1329343180368852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126314200281508,0.0,0.0,0.09525051854582324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374078913597305,0.08304047659458334,0.0,0.2318320382397676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757055546465837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788075213020102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17994844726996806,0.0,0.11477402941494495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755144315058567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425766476396433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415253834368715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486477872385039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13310367467009085,0.0,0.0,0.1205533589085037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445114242055403,0.0,0.0,0.21746432211571248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506382874006284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004058091920254,0.0,0.0,0.14232438448822887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13046429297164475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052026078933273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400602695267387,0.13450410265970264,0.0,0.0,0.11633397811559247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855235581639527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487137344821043,0.0,0.0,0.1928391459145476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242298973117347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17457281672400254,0.0,0.10814610643163053,0.07943291825101137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239851236556772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292036566979722,0.152088481308588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991722054647169,0.0,0.13882320949264298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772335721244348
mentalhealth,Antipodin,2020/01/09,"How do I kill my external motivation in order to gain an internal one ? I have a love-hate relationship towards doing art. I cannot stop drawing/doodling in my free time but I am also \*\*always\*\* dissapointed with my artwork. This is because I feel like I cannot show it to anyone since it is not good enough (I am externally motivated, I guess). And because I am always dissapointed I have stopped putting \*\*any effort\*\* into drawing (but for some reason I cannot stop trying again and again whenever I have a pen lying around).

I can remember a time when drawing was not about pleasing others but about having fun, and I wish that I could get this internal motivation back. 

So how can I get it back ?",5.76832504145937,6.872261238805969,6.859950248756224,72.39889718076287,67.20895522388061,9.53764510779436,34.291873963515755,9.725611199111238,3.4235266998341616,562,26,100,12,9,189,80,134,0.11699999999999999,0.68,0.20199999999999999,0.8739,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,5,12,5,1,0,4,0,18,0,0,6,0,26,23,11,1,2,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,3,6,2,1,1,5,1,0,1,1,1,19,5,11,21,2,17,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,11,79,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910925646190578,0.2894838001258076,0.0,0.0,0.1182932442064934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216311998419708,0.0,0.0,0.154854054112004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675165183013153,0.0,0.2120789043009608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13888642245828986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17973879343654095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795529774915149,0.1242712586091013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817653565425226,0.0,0.0,0.14590258476857448,0.0,0.0,0.1916276085309303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19245198331254645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498410245247115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699836422008673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178742965377666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909469286691236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17486968632905184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17885150540709652,0.0,0.18675922061824551,0.1970535713842153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438947936081494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4362946849267274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20286548149702133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181019087598641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20003607846828506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fbno,2020/01/09,"Jobs for people with poor executive function? I have ADD. Mainly inattentive issues and co-morbid anxiety, but I'm sure I have some undiagnosed degenerative condition as my memory and thought organisation is getting progressively worse.

--

Due to my education and ultimately acquiring a degree I've had the opportunity to get a good job in IT. But my mental state is nowhere near the level required to attain it.
I struggle with speech, reading, memory, organisation and I'm quite frankly not really connected to life. I feel feel like I'm living inside my head.

Nothing really interested me at the moment but I can see myself doing well at labour-type jobs or jobs that require little abstract thought.
I am quite creative in that sense but struggle with thought organisation so complex situations really stress me out.

I'd otherwise say I'm quite intelligent but I'm completely capped because of my mental state.
Making me come across as slow/not all there.
My friends often say I'm the smartest and dumbest person they know...

--
TLDR;
Intelligent person. Capped ability due to mental health issues. Inattentive, lack EF.
Need a career path!

Any advice? 

Thanks!",5.274028760018858,8.455865351485151,6.5040028288543175,65.56473597359738,73.70297029702971,9.392173503064592,30.90617633191891,9.725611199111238,3.958651296558228,939,43,137,28,21,314,127,202,0.11900000000000001,0.6859999999999999,0.196,0.9695,4,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,9,4,11,0,3,7,0,8,3,1,1,2,34,27,14,0,2,7,0,2,1,1,0,2,3,0,2,4,11,0,2,7,1,1,1,1,3,1,0,4,6,17,8,19,23,4,15,0,0,1,0,6,9,0,3,4,75,21,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078526817370956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505565971022653,0.0,0.08443305721918593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728077406155393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507433047110947,0.11572126906042007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161318538273032,0.07884863890996634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527190060358764,0.0,0.11532796178917125,0.0,0.0,0.09257345866782382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132718767101212,0.11731857865530824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303960539888972,0.4381023834788285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060656687787075676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795788062243911,0.05392140453361214,0.11062014048925133,0.09745908910734076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367310193384109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336822245205758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183825631607973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590337966568876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765169414359606,0.19274235976072168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35217753231560706,0.11040027213387496,0.0,0.21211832163815464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554195094167946,0.0,0.0,0.08795092255056612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406095881119344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642892526306004,0.2307662211898027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402279990564538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161423958017947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26286531764454896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923624844985283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247687122479168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1993_bigfuckup,2020/01/09,"what to do when you dont know what exactly are you experiencing? im currently, very sure of it, a mentally ill person. so, i dont know if im suffering from schizophrenia, psychosis, early stages of dementia. i dont know.",2.5888636363636373,4.627948340909093,5.327272727272729,76.46090909090911,76.95454545454545,9.854545454545457,29.181818181818183,10.125756701596842,3.4342000000000006,173,8,34,6,4,62,30,44,0.142,0.795,0.062,-0.5118,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,2,6,8,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,4,1,4,8,0,4,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7316297954844582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4495396754389434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430777789557126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20970291184337925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18169367937770614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19611968305764446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169369734618292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thesyphilticsailor,2020/01/09,"POSSIBLE misdiagnosing :( pls help a girl out To put things into context, I was first diagnosed with depression when I was 15. I don’t remember much of that year but can recall the general symptoms. The diagnosis fit: I had a flat mood, was unmotivated/persistently tired, felt worthless and was suicidal, rapidly gained weight, got no sleep, my relationship with my parents, friends, school were strained, etc. 

I only started to feel better when I started dieting and going to the gym everyday. So about 1/2 - 1 year after my diagnosis I thought I had fully recovered from depression. Unfortunately it was through my obsession to lose weight and my resulting eating disorders that I managed to do so.

As soon as I stopped restricting however, I started getting panic attacks and unmanageable anxiety levels. What I thought was depression came about 6 months later after a shoulder injury and poor performance physically.

I became plagued with thoughts of suicide and my self esteem plummeted during this time. I gave into a perfection complex and believed that I was worthless and had felt so tired. I lost interest in the sport I loved because of how poorly I was playing with the injury and my first assumption was that I was relapsing and was experiencing a second depression. I sought out a therapist who confirmed this.

This was back in August of 2019 and seeing my doctor today has made me realize how different the second episode has been for me. My mood is not persistently flat, I feel quite a large range of emotions actually (anger, sadness, guilt, desire, happiness, etc); I’m not bed bound and engage in social activities; I sometimes have a period of time in an elevated or emotional mood that can’t really be explained; and cry all the time. Even in my first episode while I would cry from time to time, I shut down most of my feelings and don’t remember doing so as frequently as I do now. Right now, I feel emotionally unstable and I’m not sure what’s going on with me.

Is there a possibility I was misdiagnosed?",7.205998168498169,8.530028024725276,7.8953296703296685,65.47050366300367,64.08241758241758,11.671062271062276,37.96886446886447,11.45678717892309,5.002707326007325,1627,83,259,51,24,542,201,364,0.262,0.628,0.11,-0.997,3,0,0,0,0,1,46.0,0,0,0,11,16,27,2,4,17,0,32,12,2,4,3,58,57,30,2,2,5,1,8,0,1,1,5,1,1,2,13,25,4,3,14,3,2,4,7,15,0,5,28,11,41,9,41,27,5,49,0,9,1,1,11,15,0,2,30,190,54,3,0.0,0.0,0.0836816948877051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06560013368368046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755541101813613,0.0,0.06593808369755105,0.0,0.05227369371834754,0.0,0.0,0.09661326918513816,0.0,0.07584077763429267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807757556763674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883893446502225,0.0,0.0,0.2954326858857082,0.08703659221777621,0.0,0.08959270934477395,0.09827935363786816,0.08777092389608165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774582224916334,0.0,0.2893787642315282,0.0,0.0,0.19127255277779698,0.056638463574859264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734353847441819,0.0,0.16467095731545894,0.0,0.0,0.2188221170470028,0.0,0.0,0.0662518717584202,0.0,0.04480194108805106,0.0,0.09746980685334962,0.0,0.06858380041204612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128472155957837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05747783547771777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593468276140472,0.09360856389404598,0.0,0.07739463227210955,0.08114072513503957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844652051097648,0.0,0.06303767169584633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521834801587563,0.0,0.1006116312752241,0.09521757624219117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933452515862888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862045610233469,0.0,0.09120793032645982,0.0,0.0,0.05493500103124276,0.0,0.0,0.0920656802698432,0.19428086108983805,0.07323183814010165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867857190259256,0.06833333373138982,0.0,0.08945815836258009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581404470464903,0.08741348278706118,0.0,0.0,0.08481103495718413,0.0,0.1820873662549944,0.0,0.0,0.07169260832731605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875977925654241,0.0,0.08082035407348091,0.08912928195750737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995648154999988,0.05696989521859161,0.0,0.0,0.2042328034329088,0.2500137408940855,0.197118884363246,0.08128297881192928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20884594997664044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609158425399942,0.0,0.0,0.11044310184432587
mentalhealth,Thing3218,2020/01/09,"How do I stop feeling sick/nauseus all the time due to stress? Any tips? Almost constantly now, even when mentally i feel fine, I have stomach pain and nausea. It's affecting my ability to do things and might get me dropped from uni.

Anyone have any advice?",2.982857142857142,5.539468510204087,3.644244897959183,86.39004081632655,78.18367346938777,7.185306122448982,26.126530612244892,8.238735603445708,1.9247844897959188,203,8,38,4,5,64,42,49,0.16899999999999998,0.725,0.107,-0.6416,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,1,0,5,2,1,2,1,10,8,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,5,1,3,7,1,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,23,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683358689689865,0.0,0.0,0.27497215937848346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734747313651089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920066525832181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967449659115319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18137066089163767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776919461407362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346712731054573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27673213817867914,0.2913071261485113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921936813252629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22957783337792376,0.31455328673213434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18243198869733804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160121424755875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QueenAlmonds,2020/01/09,"I (16F) am very certain that I have bipolar disorder and want to seek professional help and medication but the last time I had a mental crisis, my mother (36F) wrote it off as me being some sort of attention seeker. Since elementary school, I've been a hyperactive kid who had an estranged relationship with her mother that lead to me having a hatred of her until 8th grade. She was raised with the, ""spare the rod, spoil the child"", mentality and that's how she raised us. Bad behavior was met with being hit, yelled at, and punished. My mom had mostly male siblings growing up and is EXTREMELY strong, especially to a child. As you can imagine, as an elementary school kid, my mother constantly hitting and yelling at me did not make me feel very good about myself. She also verbally attacked me such as calling me stupid, lacking any common sense, etc. Combined with the kids at school who called me fat and ugly, I had no self-confidence and a deep self-loathing. I constantly lied to her due to a hatred for the woman who caused all my hurt, which of course, made my relationship with her 100x worse. My mom hates lying above all else. I'm not going to say that everything about that time was horrible but it caused me to want to die in elementary. I prayed to God to strike me down and kill me. My mom sent me to therapy for probably 2-1/2 years to combat my pathological lies, (I kept my thoughts about death to myself), that I had grown into.

Fast-forward to 6th grade where our arguments were becoming extremely frequent and I would come to school crying almost every day and be comforted by my friends. Thankfully, school made life so much better because the people around me made my feel like a champion. Sure, I never thought that highly of myself but a lot of people knew me and I was pretty well liked. It was a stark contrast to how I felt when I got home. I felt like my autistic younger sister was better and more loved than me when I was at home.

Fast-forward to 7th grade where my life went downhill. My relationships at school had me on cloud nine but my home life got worse and worse. I started think about how all my friends probably secretly hated me, (being high so energy meant that I was a really annoying kid but I couldn't help it). Life at home sucked as always.

I eventually went from praying for God to kill me to wanting to kill myself.

One day in class, and it was a Friday afternoon, (that day is burned into my memory I swear), a classmate was complaining about *something* bad going on in her life. That made me feel bad about my life. Then I snapped. I got hysterical, opened my backpack, took out my safety scissors in the middle of class and tried to *fucking stab my wrists* right then and there like a fucking maniac. I didn't get hurt because they were safety scissors tho \\(-\_-)/. My friends grabbed them away and the other girl and I stepped out of class to be in hysterics away from everyone else. Needless to say, I was taken to a mental hospital that night. My mom had CPS on her ass for potential abuse, (which I ended up denying like a coward), and I was homeschooled for the rest of the semester. I wasn't allowed to be left alone because I could hurt myself. I was only allowed to write with crayons and stayed in a corner all day when I wasn't doing work.

My mother hated me then. Apparently, I only wanted attention. She told me so. I had just tried to end my life and she hated me for it. Not out of concern. I was like a piece of shit in her home. She was gonna put me up for adoption.

Half a year later, somehow we were able to bounce back from that. I went to a new middle school for 8th grade and life was never better. I got straight A's for the entire year. I was so happy to be out of the house.

I'm in high school now and that entire experience has fucked up my head. Although my mother and I have never gotten along better, I came away from the whole thing scarred.

My thoughts are rapid and loud. I have the urge to harm myself via cutting. I'm typing this with 6 fresh new cuts right now. Death and killing myself is in my head every week even though I don't truly want to. At the same time, everything is pointless. My mood can change within moments. I don't sleep the same way as before. I feel perfectly fine on the 3 hours of sleep I've had. Sometimes I'm so passionate and creative that my head feels like it's gonna burst with ideas. I'm always so happy and sad at the same time and if I don't get some help soon, I'm gonna snap.

My mom hated me the last time I needed help. What do I do? I'm hurting myself emotionally and physically. If I tell the doctor what's happening to me, I don't know how she'll react to hearing my talk about suicide. I don't want to open old wounds. What do I do?

TL:DR; My mom reacted badly the last time I snapped and hated my for it. A traumatic childhood has messed up my head and I think I'm bipolar but I'm scared of what asking for help could mean or change.",2.9477135145556232,4.774591101214579,4.0098958935801035,87.2628609986505,75.23481781376519,7.012454212454213,23.90765374975901,7.83500028581142,1.1553252940042418,3880,120,794,57,84,1257,403,988,0.22899999999999998,0.631,0.14,-0.9991,3,1,1,0,2,10,132.0,3,1,2,8,36,63,22,1,45,0,70,29,10,16,10,139,149,69,8,14,13,12,8,7,3,5,15,6,5,9,34,54,1,1,21,0,0,14,16,35,1,3,61,14,140,27,127,71,18,118,2,5,0,6,71,54,6,10,55,517,174,20,0.040680904508968316,0.04820021965239411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040736049521250366,0.04213314835241504,0.0,0.032532504638215984,0.06769954286155057,0.0,0.0,0.027664410073755343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036214629865589765,0.038031154197443566,0.04628040176500957,0.1146631467589895,0.03128110448502105,0.13586742408988806,0.07439610540648828,0.04492886289381103,0.034616453446936264,0.0,0.0,0.1439158165581732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307950380290416,0.046528117241641014,0.0,0.08358099000319122,0.0860700057500958,0.03504299710101858,0.0,0.08792321123619773,0.0,0.06496078403016772,0.0,0.04468606337498946,0.10494327184409398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042220356193792656,0.0,0.046623840995559086,0.04163862956245015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796735131518239,0.04576054207253676,0.07206241332554547,0.0,0.04536996203895738,0.026869353757425517,0.0,0.06855083320366047,0.03887234760018237,0.07312274770559071,0.03979373066332908,0.0,0.0,0.10284743822074544,0.05812489261927205,0.07812009589269618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428989773084633,0.1128265220855376,0.04250818712704365,0.0,0.046239791048517984,0.03412121260968115,0.13014494242869387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035973989506530364,0.08661115861628467,0.0,0.2409838260535918,0.16700137786974587,0.0,0.045850335979689835,0.0,0.13633776387848806,0.12894482745110972,0.20403132070352326,0.0,0.040062496397152265,0.04694030188055789,0.174198998637321,0.045923789493909725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800295738469079,0.0,0.02235716122056513,0.0994811003484172,0.0,0.0,0.0441999217797142,0.0,0.2298730074556838,0.13912244549856564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03458545025061285,0.03671610460789835,0.15397302187802678,0.027154819652136883,0.0,0.0,0.044313431026083885,0.0,0.04098173144456725,0.12299035048255455,0.0,0.0,0.2858699021391967,0.0,0.0,0.029905145618956762,0.030164375227530658,0.0941268643665853,0.07857974214704565,0.0,0.038176273081618285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04268776601744629,0.0,0.02756643372536075,0.061879322061670426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05640603396589738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041387104934788775,0.08772179120016227,0.0,0.0,0.0408955451727336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026061229122539192,0.0,0.0,0.1310282011173673,0.0,0.06948254034794611,0.0,0.06470217615495802,0.040728682254648534,0.3293699777033083,0.0,0.0,0.0848781111569173,0.0,0.04175836387814976,0.033651664594686284,0.0,0.08142056754336921,0.0,0.0,0.03131814778017614,0.04023445476740449,0.0,0.028794153594914176,0.0433604314399822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044498306754828285,0.0,0.03834127106097336,0.0,0.0,0.03269777007903392,0.035556903624286616,0.03745351121996582,0.0465221596819884,0.0,0.027026585319155288,0.05213336197283505,0.0399687821318275,0.09688828223697472,0.14232817539808484,0.0,0.0,0.03887234760018237,0.045197981754061534,0.05523932759376926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04893411921662941,0.0,0.0,0.06713201333775178,0.1439679089116872,0.03229060845897789,0.032631767762761686,0.0,0.03657701873378832,0.11313481813306657,0.0,0.04541877708540868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029616182989763217,0.0,0.12437195148462515,0.028898547371000106,0.0,0.0,0.07859150618378882
mentalhealth,zahrabha,2020/01/09,"need advice?? sorry ok to premise this i’ve been diagnosed with GAD and social anxiety and am currently in therapy but my social anxiety is more based around how people perceive me and maintaining relationships, to many i’m a very out going person and make friends very easily. 


so it was my best friends birthdays a couple days ago and i took the day off work and planned everything with her family and surprised her along with one of my friends i was sooo so sooo excited to see her face light up but i began feel revolted by the food we were eating and began dissecting everything everyone was saying to me by the time we got into town and started doing all the activities i’d planned out for the day i felt absolutely drained i couldn’t focus on what was happening when we were at the art gallery i couldn’t remember what was going on every little thing my friends did (looked at a different painting to me, laughed at something) i began dissecting. once we left i felt like crying i felt like a terrible terrible person i couldn’t all this aside to really be there for my friend, we were then walking around and i just couldn’t seem to focus and i was forgetting what we were doing and just feeling over all panicky.. i don’t know what this feeling is?? 

is it just another part of my anxiety that i haven’t felt beofre?? and what can i do??",4.445381679389313,6.06596785114504,5.417473282442753,79.55453053435114,70.87022900763358,9.362137404580151,29.893893129770994,9.766711354998122,2.978907786259541,1075,44,201,27,20,353,139,262,0.079,0.737,0.184,0.986,2,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,6,0,0,4,12,14,0,0,10,1,27,4,1,2,3,55,50,20,0,5,5,0,7,2,5,0,1,1,0,2,12,28,2,0,11,1,0,4,6,2,0,1,21,11,33,12,31,24,6,33,0,0,2,0,20,17,0,1,14,146,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073424565780784,0.09137933729407154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809444411683823,0.2365810527073389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835364257493325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818218180752456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140624712789848,0.1132349051073224,0.19944542881073468,0.0,0.0,0.10462991183437892,0.0,0.10770271492582968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548250352901532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685422821546772,0.09850289462439224,0.18529373080251094,0.0,0.09718011298430676,0.0,0.15636982577403052,0.0,0.3959141162716691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12465175232089827,0.0,0.3982191469308423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717206565329015,0.0,0.0824471272085654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115842794028033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665325692342656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11200301773009312,0.0,0.0,0.1007250245987104,0.10331904805027,0.0,0.0,0.08656610485360422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881056853706123,0.10451281602317418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643681068632298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097830071594519,0.06985360247207616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163187018577736,0.0,0.07146671043732658,0.18002107971807738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06603939984390285,0.0,0.0,0.1106755648877349,0.11677611019095772,0.0,0.0,0.08197796162600167,0.0,0.0,0.08214603193304097,0.09384543600025666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21016597189976455,0.0,0.07936048119222318,0.0,0.1153961075768658,0.07296465617489721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178875904277146,0.0,0.06848562153054555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011015597136115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145321110972634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17011315353901693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504768639709528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soldierchrome,2020/01/09,"Do I have some sort of mental issue? I’m not asking to be diagnosed but to know if I should contact a doctor. 

I can’t concentrate at one thing for more then 3-4 minutes, I start thinking all this different shit in my head, I find it extremely hard to concentrate at something. It’s like I can’t keep my mind still at one place, and my mind is constantly changing like switching channels on tv. 

I’m also find myself fidgeting a lot at times when I shouldn’t, my mind sometimes goes blank at things. That’s it I can’t write anymore of this. 

I’s this sort of thing normal, could I be showing signs of ADHD?",3.4501244444444485,4.4593844480000016,4.64746666666667,86.48017777777778,72.52000000000002,7.795555555555558,27.488888888888887,8.167268648758528,1.6787422222222217,476,17,100,7,9,157,79,125,0.064,0.879,0.057,-0.2022,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,2,0,11,4,2,0,1,23,18,6,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,10,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,1,15,2,15,13,4,14,0,0,0,0,3,8,1,5,8,67,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862045043766563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239032886308484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15365615109341793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484544389966034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16390310066052316,0.0,0.0,0.16743215962463115,0.0,0.12370481250805815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15725808007046954,0.0,0.16187648322234308,0.0,0.1585848736284744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832197380855229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879337210427212,0.0,0.15901035098629904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617142686899588,0.0,0.13771537539392187,0.0,0.0,0.08514947835968402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513890598370878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172213675167332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561403388612548,0.0,0.4693274622273576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180564029635565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20997902450979747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187648322234308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15904089371183802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927828941988045,0.15323693387242104,0.0,0.10966540582801183,0.0,0.12373311373832807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088003372699296,0.09927755436679013,0.0,0.0,0.09034517524735937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ambition786,2020/01/09,The Nice Bug Anyone else feel like they try too hard to be passive and nice but due to certain experiences you just want to go cold hearted and grow the thickest skin which nobody could ever penetrate?,5.106754385964912,7.084824236842112,4.876315789473686,82.66254385964915,69.78947368421053,7.171929824561403,28.456140350877188,7.793537801064563,1.8136561403508773,163,6,29,2,3,50,33,38,0.027999999999999997,0.7170000000000001,0.255,0.7814,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,1,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,2,2,2,0,2,9,5,3,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,4,3,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,16,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331728250268463,0.34168359523789005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26625191171793955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785747969677853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.301646390167383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262016313897867,0.0,0.0,0.16861451074143055,0.23823394389904784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895210002143534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29872726781857906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39516838131818777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16291858731114656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264070052945237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196691647871582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Empoeror_Saturn,2020/01/09,"Why did I do that?? What's happening? (Slight tw?) I haven't been able to sleep for the past week, my mental health has been really bad. It was 6am and I  couldn't get myself to sleep, I couldn't even force my self to cry. I was so frustrated that I punched myself in the face multiple times and then a few times on my shin. It hurt to the point I hesitated a few times and tapped my face softly but then immediately went back to full force. It felt good though??? It made me feel calmer?? All my senses before hand were just scrambled and mixed but this somehow grounded me. I was able to sleep soon afterwards so idfk what happened.

Iv never self harmed ever, I've always been able to cope, was this a form of self harm? Or is this just a form of being an idiot? Why tf did I resort to punching myself dafuk??",0.9429183400267752,3.1643507349397595,2.4367871485943766,94.01781793842035,83.81927710843374,5.375635876840696,16.451137884872825,6.691623216298621,-0.317622757697456,626,12,139,7,18,203,101,166,0.121,0.7929999999999999,0.086,-0.6214,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,0,10,7,2,0,8,0,17,8,6,1,3,18,24,12,0,2,5,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,11,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,13,4,19,1,13,8,6,18,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,2,12,94,30,0,0.4081058166873973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319224405308595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104602727387973,0.11358377011420852,0.0,0.0,0.1157559971957587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14942835881942682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898500143281337,0.12305169189756482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878352104164069,0.0,0.13061519451940967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107281509091666,0.0,0.0,0.1140999321960208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24059108393767215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14459913308345315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14562857246970787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871986377848318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370915585694698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491878825162487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986106005460565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859730274233547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714767877220737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4257433713763791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40840054582749946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365396427632004,0.0,0.2379697836104628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911928986108203,0.0,0.0,0.12610606023547832,0.2455013485074719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cplivin,2020/01/09,"Should I be worried about being prescribed anti-depressants? A week from today I am scheduled for my first psychiatric session since 2009. I have struggled for years with chronic high functioning depression and anxiety. During my initial evaluation with my new healthcare provider I was asked if I was open to prescription remedies and didn’t know how to respond. 

I have been very hesitant to accept the idea of taking prescribed anti-depressants and was hoping someone with personal experience could shed some light on the matter.",10.702471910112358,11.539849808988766,9.11829213483146,61.3927191011236,56.528089887640455,12.063820224719102,44.76629213483146,11.602472056035307,5.895991460674157,439,24,57,11,5,134,68,89,0.13699999999999998,0.7879999999999999,0.075,-0.6736,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,3,0,12,1,0,1,0,17,16,5,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,5,1,9,2,12,7,1,9,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,3,6,43,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16107133163693424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968372428970732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681082509164283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5440431305461483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20595978201694806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17909500994986574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224592342508271,0.0,0.20912516113748764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376870304918171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571360550391124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033519639120907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838454603681578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741703878700678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17839961424962622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22011415770112994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15830853480514515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19957821579731305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17372704949907686,0.0,0.0,0.1688917239780055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21382528252462685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558827158765832
mentalhealth,dontignoreme_,2020/01/09,"i just want to sleep. i just want to sleep.

i literally just want to sleep but whatever the hell is following me isn’t letting me. i see it and i hear it and i just wanna be left alone. 
it’s just in the corner of my eye and i think it’s a women but i can’t look fast enough but i know she’s there. i’ve seen her in my mirrors and it’s almost every time i close my eyes she’s there. 
it’s just gotten worse and i can barely sleep over it. she’s gotten louder. 
i was trying to take a nap the other day because i’m always tired now and something coughed directly into my ear. it was so loud it felt like my ear was bleeding. and literally a couple minutes before posting this, i heard knocking on my wall ( everyone’s asleep and my cat was laying beside me) 
i thought, ‘maybe if ivory (my cat) doesn’t react it’s not real, right?’ and she didn’t at first. she was still for a couple seconds before she shot up like she saw something and left my room. 
i’m so scared i want to cry. i can’t tell anyone about this shit cause i don’t wanna be called crazy. everything’s just getting worse and i don’t know why..

my cat finally came back.. she was gone for like fifteen minutes..",-0.1893359893758273,1.9568300996015964,2.011645418326694,95.54203652058436,88.64143426294821,4.621567065073042,17.530013280212483,6.079149491110277,-0.3676471181938905,909,23,207,8,30,305,126,251,0.159,0.782,0.059000000000000004,-0.9857,0,1,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,15,6,2,1,7,0,18,13,10,2,0,41,42,17,0,7,12,0,1,3,0,0,3,5,1,1,13,14,0,0,5,1,0,3,8,3,0,2,16,12,40,3,18,23,1,25,1,0,6,0,14,13,2,2,11,129,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527486002984905,0.11922836985967085,0.0,0.0,0.09578807247103016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049374908121068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851925956170141,0.0,0.07017535850340678,0.0,0.1959152579949475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11754917677072685,0.13166525143005425,0.0,0.11825872951607636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547535488708827,0.12645260798177566,0.07424210935446526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894850464221203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699256304123488,0.1100009569240409,0.10346136414581324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053211130415624,0.1261070301495956,0.0,0.09792000156577216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060144827232650376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974726622970936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653257547818825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501538492989556,0.11771678347017407,0.0,0.16872370808449322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667080756757078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565231835949738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025199886407996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103040928203716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983108353320999,0.0,0.0,0.1152540121411531,0.0,0.0917347876385118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816780487312856,0.0,0.0,0.4608077924795621,0.0,0.0,0.17724816933319154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193403092331254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655501892729607,0.0,0.10061891461140046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376348559730872,0.0,0.09139147679316537,0.06712670427520316,0.13231213822878524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07815811586237577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716002286856901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387682106355514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346318059396885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crayonberryjooce,2020/01/09,"I’m struggling with trust issues TW: suicide attempt I’m a 19F who currently is diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and ADHD, the classic cocktail.

After a REALLY rough semester with a suicide attempt I managed to talk to my psychiatrist about getting medicated and she added 100mg generic brand Zoloft to my already daily adhd meds 60mg Atomoxitine. 

The adhd meds have been helping me for the past 10 months really well but when I started taking the Zoloft everything kind of went haywire even though it was already fucky. 

First off I immediately lost all of my sex drive. This is bad because before hand I was literally a sex fiend. Constantly horny constantly wanting to try and do new things with my BF (a very helpful and wholesome supportive man trying his best). Now it’s almost all gone, and the rare event it does come it’s gone in a flash. It’s really impacted our relationship not just for him being accustomed to a certain amount of sex (he’s not voiced any complaints but I get the vibe he’s missing it) but also decreased my confidence and feeling of intimacy. 

Second off, where the fuck did my trust go? Earlier in our relationship, my bf really helped learn to trust people and him. I had a rough childhood (who hasn’t these days) and it lead to a huge trust in people and authorities. He helped me learn to be more trusting and proved through action he is a trustworthy and earnest man. I opened up to him in ways I’ve never opened up to anyone, including my old therapist and my father who I’m really close to. 

Now that I’m on the Zoloft I’m coming up with conspiracy after conspiracy that I can’t trust him that he doesn’t trust me that he doesn’t love me that he’s just with me because he’s scared of my health etc etc despite his constant reassurance and proving otherwise. In my consciousness I know he’d never lie to me or manipulate me and that he loves me, but we get into the smallest argument and it goes poof. I feel almost paranoid, like my brain is picking up on small things that prove he is manipulating me that don’t even exist. 

Needless to say it’s putting a huge strain on our relationship and that’s putting a huge strain on my stability. I hate to admit it, but right now I’m very emotionally dependent on him. It’s not where I want to be, and I have a plan to seek therapy to work on it, but it’s the sad truth. He says if I can’t trust him, we shouldn’t be together, and that freaks me out despite being a pretty reasonable assertion. 

How do I talk to my psychiatrist and soon to acquire therapist to tinker with my meds or start the right path to working on this? The Zoloft has stopped the irrational “kill yourself it’s the easiest solution” thoughts I was having before but the mental and physical side effects are killing me as well. I was able to trust my bf pretty well before I started taking it and now it seems to be working to worsen my paranoia and anxiety rather than ease it. 

Would like any commentary or advice y’all are able to give!",5.513594087959625,6.316948650684933,6.4064239365537095,76.50454578226389,67.63013698630137,9.845998558038934,32.1492429704398,9.93914555978268,3.134993835616438,2388,98,451,54,38,792,264,584,0.147,0.6759999999999999,0.177,0.9772,1,0,0,0,0,2,45.0,5,1,0,12,20,36,4,4,29,0,35,15,2,8,9,88,71,38,4,6,17,1,5,2,3,2,7,3,0,2,35,38,1,1,14,1,0,11,12,14,3,2,12,8,62,22,65,50,7,70,0,4,0,6,52,32,1,8,28,290,97,7,0.14063311881826535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535205194940964,0.0687125280413285,0.0,0.0,0.14082375408456796,0.0,0.15519214367998851,0.056232127154810206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563534331155207,0.0,0.10758395096619952,0.0,0.0,0.04916697328030655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058711389981977086,0.08572864392219806,0.0,0.17950263899356197,0.0,0.07379289091291732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849653538300946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211429793545821,0.0,0.22796166091767445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04534836367507021,0.0,0.06056354958322214,0.07136982764832217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615344949938639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909666498512301,0.0,0.0,0.15684310216844524,0.09288684863693207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319598955900388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07110833042693873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059811229512177225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500652610780018,0.1102125002469284,0.06745405109955868,0.03996252115795758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942304473425953,0.0,0.07474321450135095,0.0,0.0,0.1885268302499331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.073392219207464,0.0,0.0,0.15558970944237713,0.07322387602091847,0.03864414211436356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870623820138712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675883098465952,0.0,0.12692688041702976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23431753730982466,0.07083653592745827,0.0708625532531284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056126006861261665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846493098941537,0.06791217124755604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737854005814248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671251124405594,0.09749729722755283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307444035702374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137512754041362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252329425794913,0.0722971342790203,0.0,0.2264810087029896,0.0,0.12009991506449215,0.0,0.1118371006843588,0.07039914279151092,0.0,0.0,0.06401355478079691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14931126800138753,0.0,0.0,0.058787792233140665,0.0,0.07351013525629345,0.0,0.15382980630835755,0.0797943983285551,0.0,0.0,0.1057386033437514,0.1130355738182606,0.0,0.0,0.08041311383326111,0.16328589024469198,0.0934303951772468,0.0,0.06908566260280047,0.05582349373494648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548065627723487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160370513167438,0.0829490571574805,0.05581401189253801,0.0,0.0,0.18966909476432964,0.0651841550437292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357387814808768,0.0,0.0,0.04995086632359879,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aeoniumkombi,2020/01/09,"Keep having moments of feeling normal only to end up back in a major depression or anxiety episode The problem with this is the normal moments make me feel like I'm making all the bad moments up and I really do just need to 'snap out of it', but then I end up in another shitty episode and I can't just 'snap out of it'. This has become a recurring cycle that's preventing me from seeing a therapist or anything because the good days make me feel like the bad days aren't real.",2.9869329896907217,4.6722417525773166,4.831533505154642,82.01884664948456,74.77319587628867,7.73659793814433,27.5889175257732,8.472884824447931,2.1271453608247417,378,15,72,7,8,129,62,97,0.17800000000000002,0.726,0.096,-0.8176,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,8,0,6,0,0,3,1,24,16,6,0,4,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,4,6,3,14,16,2,17,0,1,1,0,0,7,0,2,12,49,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18184760631452807,0.1326670039510358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427111515136936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335046011656151,0.2895994853045287,0.10571616156313547,0.1915304666519219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236850938758966,0.0,0.14936771887789166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30720002161921284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630614251190526,0.24778476663818616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14545776040020605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541450336023707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16945000983999892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472806751496259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12858987500412475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3398325779903281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13189489636748505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659409933481945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973916801104926,0.11109827967736463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819451496613358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013557752033747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,boon-boons,2020/01/09,"It's hard to understand feelings and emotions? WARNING! TALK OF ANIMAL ABUSE AND GORE!
So starting from the beginning when I was between 5 to 11 years old I use to abuse animals badly, most passed, and a few went to good homes. During this time I felt no feelings while abusing these animals, my parents never taught me better because I always hide it behind their backs. They did eventually catch me and I realized it was wrong because I would get into serious trouble and so I stopped abusing. When I started getting older 12 to 18 years old never felt thankful for anything, I hardly ever thought about the people and friends around me. Their feelings and emotions just didn't connect, I could relate but when they started to cry or feel awful I just couldn't feel for them. During this time and now being touched by my family, friends, and others felt uncomfortable, as if they were strangers. There was a time when my mom's ex came home beaten up and I looked at him but didn't know wether to tell if he was smiling, if I should feel bad, or maybe shocked. During this time I have also discovered gore, I'll admit I watched and seen A LOT but it doesn't make me sick, it makes me a little uneasy only because most look painful. A few days ago my sister's boyfriend told me about a site that shows random videos and images by clicking a button on the screen. One video popped up and it was a man getting his throat slit, he was rushingly trying to exit out of the site but heard the ""horrid"" gargling noises of the man choking on his blood. He told me he felt a horrible feeling and said it was terrible because he watched someone die, someone who might have had a family. I thought about it and it made sense but I just can't feel what he felt. I am 20 years old now and I've ALWAYS been told to think about others, be kind, and listen to them but wasn't that something I was supposed to pick up on when I was small? I just don't understand why it's so hard for me to pick up on emotions and to think about others, I literally have to try and think about how they feel but I always have to fake it. Sure I do feel when it comes to break ups, love, and affection but not with my family, friends or other people. I would talk about this with a therapist but I currently can't find one so.. I thought to share on here since this is a place to share about mental health.",4.8199624906226575,5.5059944989429175,5.104408374820977,85.64277910386687,69.12684989429175,7.8791243265361794,28.78871990724954,7.831003766801068,1.6700173088726729,1870,64,379,21,31,591,224,473,0.16699999999999998,0.74,0.09300000000000001,-0.9835,2,0,1,0,2,0,43.0,0,0,8,2,31,21,1,0,18,1,35,6,2,8,4,97,86,49,1,8,20,4,19,0,3,4,3,3,2,2,26,27,0,1,27,3,0,6,12,10,0,2,34,29,51,11,54,44,5,59,0,0,7,1,40,20,0,11,32,253,77,2,0.0,0.3146026313484412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05884277190271914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053084880304221545,0.16570298703197267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05462592609883752,0.05909318428001437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05104290941744877,0.11085076334058323,0.1618610225689754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058708620661353114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592220648304644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718137374592155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05299984558611202,0.0,0.07291643701916517,0.04281026842637384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889302191372834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22400914951903197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06004543590814041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18773436285974346,0.0,0.33564239877987395,0.0,0.3186809612367351,0.0,0.060671052650009126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385744167571574,0.0,0.1040440346055219,0.0,0.0,0.055677252869490365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17839307479059568,0.0,0.0,0.07055992359018494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317115738006358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912562071998919,0.03648127436034285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653122420950787,0.0,0.0,0.11148668207157096,0.0,0.0,0.0564347721529157,0.05991146516453535,0.06281132921804575,0.08861969694291938,0.0,0.06668866006303395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689645844514458,0.07041977555417081,0.0,0.07774465213791264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239427476977862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089671522089441,0.0,0.08996299860700055,0.05048575941938735,0.07063408894014479,0.0,0.07370827064632597,0.0,0.0,0.0920404867320944,0.0,0.06935404080781556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314355420498205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05491106838876008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248885115761012,0.05110335477544534,0.0,0.0,0.14095448973687244,0.0,0.0,0.0554975077761888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06256332881891194,0.0,0.0,0.10670910402769763,0.05801994017597735,0.06111472762995152,0.0,0.0770734843014582,0.0,0.12760283803665207,0.0,0.15809735286687984,0.15482923389899214,0.0,0.0,0.19028973721338427,0.0,0.09013671483370084,0.0,0.0,0.13820997249591954,0.0,0.05733189092858024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06153587358880808,0.059898548568673424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943103486937391,0.07257722824806334,0.0,0.12824160774249269
mentalhealth,Unwvrthyy,2020/01/09,"NOT DELUSIONS ( long ) Hey so I’m diagnosed with bpd and depression. They also say bipolar 2 ( idk tho so I don’t claim it ) 

Anyways it’s like I know the truth. So there is a high one and my family, some friends and, my treatment team work with him. They do this by collecting information about me and giving it to him. They want me dead but the high one wants me to kill myself or for me to be killed. He will have either the police to kill me or for hospital staff to kill me. I mean he ( the high one ) can control people. 

Anyways I’m so tired of people saying I’m not thinking right and all that bullshit when it’s the truth. I was hospitalized a while back for a suicide attempt and they said I had psychosis for these same thoughts and they put me on antipsychotics. But I’m NOT psychotic. I don’t even experience hallucinations. I know the doctor just didn’t want to admit the truth. 

So my question is how can I tell my therapist and convince her it’s the truth ? I’m not CRAZY and she is the only person on my treatment team I think I can trust. What do I do ?",1.3979576587795783,3.51132463013699,3.0557430469074305,90.88456102117064,81.23744292237444,6.173599003735991,22.28331257783313,7.348242739294969,0.7461123287671234,830,27,181,12,22,274,116,219,0.196,0.68,0.124,-0.9833,0,0,0,0,0,4,23.0,0,0,5,5,16,13,4,0,12,0,17,4,0,2,5,42,34,23,6,3,10,0,0,1,1,1,4,3,0,1,9,11,0,1,9,2,0,1,7,5,0,3,5,3,33,8,17,27,4,11,0,1,0,0,24,6,0,4,5,128,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968856117806881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315879545427733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258733465604088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588283238207222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434847212566413,0.12296723891225705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400471908727452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002008470881321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851039393455046,0.11421179623831912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360212222598922,0.0,0.0,0.11622051909710647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3840128091115556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5361491712594663,0.0,0.1331644929661777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05918899264618744,0.0,0.0,0.1072161514938549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197059134574216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462882116634808,0.09214193682887514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798378021250093,0.10578569135170428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179172668158696,0.1357185288758568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346357442425723,0.11524377269190562,0.19269066399981688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325211729342793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589262643550612,0.0,0.0,0.14066739221831126,0.0,0.15525926223918216,0.0,0.09618155342684817,0.0,0.13924697836838254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143766532397565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820046410448677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sarahbare99,2020/01/09,"Resources for a friend? I have a very dear friend (and roommate) who really struggles with depression and anxiety. These manifest in some really unhealthy ways in regards to me. She has told me she is envious that I have my life (somewhat) together, so i think that is where a lot of the issues come from. She has begun to basically mimic my life. She dresses like me, decorates like me, and has INTENSE separation anxiety anytime I'm not with her. I'm very solitary by nature, and her constant need to be with me is really exhausting. I've become her only support system, and it is making it really hard to just be a friend, as I feel like I'm always her mother/therapist/teacher, etc. 
Our school turned her away from their new group-therapy centered health center, and she is overwhelmed trying to go to her health provider. 
Does anyone know if resources I can supply her with to help her become self sufficient? Or other ways to help her? TIA

TLDR: Looking for resources for a depressed/ anxious friend to find some self-sufficiency.",4.783750000000001,6.967949875000006,5.560833333333335,76.56750000000002,71.08333333333334,8.55,30.22916666666667,9.188382445141503,2.976504166666667,824,35,137,18,16,268,112,192,0.106,0.71,0.184,0.9490000000000001,0,0,0,1,0,0,30.0,1,0,1,0,3,15,1,2,6,0,13,5,0,1,0,25,27,10,0,2,4,0,2,3,4,0,5,0,0,1,7,11,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,6,0,0,1,3,28,9,24,24,5,14,0,3,1,0,25,6,0,6,6,95,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895761077639254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18195916625625294,0.1343547717270673,0.0,0.08315721243811543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117367569288446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626932318266366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244592861291954,0.0,0.12851890201851976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20486499870495747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040746812561366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13263614064787846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06013356268364323,0.08496217636211369,0.0,0.0,0.10869802387524552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.367533865287757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758951466361733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653611486753348,0.0,0.0,0.2528297738061503,0.0,0.0,0.15942984311846647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12412991804773887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06535971040910123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16800470607548004,0.17430661879561873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986955475698102,0.0,0.0,0.10110832007907727,0.0,0.0,0.0793853535860567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818359406601961,0.0,0.11486138915589315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045009181536992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047532504775381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036147024526064,0.0,0.0,0.24813565150591116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432935212448125,0.0,0.0,0.1349580682005709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13600451570854066,0.13808455714583692,0.0,0.07620425078974358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364078636838755,0.0,0.08074429528649639,0.12935949682477466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19625608580839615,0.0,0.18879899795785626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kissedbyafrog,2020/01/09,"My existence is exhausting They hate me. No matter what I do. No matter how much I try. And I try. I try so hard. But all they see me as a bitch. A lazy no good dirty ass bitch. I'm in a house full of people and I've never felt so alone. I left town for 3 months just me and my daughter in a big empty house all day. I thought that was lonesome. But this is so much worse. What's wrong with me? Why am I so unloved? These four people have known me my entire life and they all, for their own reasons, hate me. I don't know what else I can do.
 I just wanted to be with them so badly. Be a family. But they don't want me here. I can see it every time they look at me. One day my daughter will hate me too. It's unavoidable I know it. She will look at me the same way everyone else does. What's the point of fighting anymore? If I were braver I'd rid myself of this miserable existence.  But I'm weak. I'm a coward. And they know it so they treat me as the coward I am. I could poor out my soul and they would tell me to clean up the mess. There has to be more to life than my constant loneliness.",-1.4946177685950417,0.4532595123966985,0.9147469008264472,101.97393853305786,94.37190082644628,4.347314049586777,14.174070247933884,5.985473137389443,-1.0050128099173552,830,16,214,8,32,278,124,242,0.31,0.638,0.052000000000000005,-0.9967,0,2,0,0,2,0,31.0,0,0,10,0,12,15,6,1,10,0,21,5,1,2,4,35,38,20,0,5,7,2,2,0,0,3,4,0,1,0,12,9,0,0,7,0,1,0,6,13,0,2,4,6,45,2,20,27,9,18,1,1,4,1,15,11,3,1,6,146,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13454527761392554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12883360635249516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846756655804912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14038415507826604,0.0,0.10372078830012477,0.0,0.0,0.16755953680313992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136831700528939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21704255459134847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945290400454656,0.12413244687117632,0.0,0.0,0.12246548954686415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473183704662352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896047892490772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637185064687687,0.3847711011962389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997922630882213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21418174862604164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114517853315306,0.0,0.18351540778165096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21817962715836287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369114726682913,0.0,0.19099432521551785,0.0,0.10019288527251828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802887093510897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801233896779796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280483805357495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13356682965218694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20703935622377304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354512198343765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031322631614903,0.07575026877114116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645965572336915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15324594394577226,0.1031147457364583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722156181534395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323871218920784,0.09228275670615822,0.14203375959457082,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HorseKarate,2020/01/09,Is there some sort of doctor I can visit that can produce a scan that visually shows I am mentally ill? My parents refuse to believe me any other way. I’m 24 and they think I’m going through a phase. I understand there isn’t a test that says “You have a problem!” But I’ve been seeing therapists and psychiatrists for years. I’d love some more objective scan that literally tells them that. If it’s not possible then tell me so but I’m trying my best here,2.070215053763441,4.223072795698927,3.792688172043016,86.2756989247312,79.10752688172043,7.574193548387097,24.31182795698925,8.515128840125781,1.6931634408602156,362,13,75,8,9,121,68,93,0.061,0.841,0.099,0.7463,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,2,2,4,3,0,0,4,0,7,3,0,1,0,14,15,7,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,7,2,0,1,2,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,4,10,2,4,14,4,5,0,0,3,1,10,0,0,4,2,47,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15973320613641762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646405135338288,0.2465024884617399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24041979501476946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334933594384645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21199733123618988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367138012828686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26081746831165303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648031015857277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22475793904958927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18679389897851825,0.0,0.0,0.18717686175694906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41060830149991495,0.0,0.0,0.2727253111922829,0.0,0.1505079817785704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594748429091458,0.0,0.0,0.2445286994642422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864446920609177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15126141282075256
mentalhealth,Daniel_128,2020/01/09,"I can’t cope  I was physically and sexually abused as a little boy. I think I have PTSD and BPD but I am not going to claim I do because I haven’t seen anyone. I am actually going tomorrow. I just can’t cope. I can’t hold down even a part time job. I spent the entire time feeling like breaking down at every moment. Even almost did at times. I was tearing up just a few feet from my coworkers but none of them noticed because I made sure to hide my face. I can’t sleep at night. I’m always up until 4-5 am and I wake up at 3-4 pm. I avoid things that stress me out like the plague. Feels like everyone around me is pressuring me to start a career but I don’t know if I can even handle a simple part time job. I feel like a deadbeat. Like eventually I will have to get a job, and the stress will put me further into depression and anxiety. I’m not suicidal, but I’m always the closest to suicide thoughts when I am at work. I avoid adult responsibilities. I am almost 19 and I still don’t have a driver’s license. I withdrew from my physics course at the last moment so I didn’t have to go. I avoid physical confrontation and I avoid romantic relationships ever since I was molested. No one in my family knows I was molested. Only 3 of my closest friends know. I have never told anyone face to face, mostly because I suck at social interaction in general, and it wouldn’t get any easier talking about such a serious topic. I just don’t find joy in anything anymore. Only distraction. I sit in bed and fantasize. Sometimes when I am getting flashbacks it feels like  I am seeing something happening to someone else, not me. Sometimes I see it happening from outside my body. Every flashback feels like being stabbed. Sometimes I can even almost feel his legs wrapped around mine and his hand grabbing me through my swim shorts. I have anger issues and mood swings that I think are connected to my abuse. I can be very kind and considerate, and then someone insults or judges me negatively and I explode in anger. Sometimes I even lose the ability to feel empathy or sympathy until I have calmed down and I feel bad. I feeling sad and lost to feeling extreme anger and a wanting for revenge. I want to beat the shit out of pedophiles. There is a pedophile that rubs a video store near me and I fantasize about jumping him when he closes his store at night. I fantasize about finding a pedophile abusing a little boy and I beat the shit out of them and I hug and comfort the little boy. I want to attack all pedophiles but the fantasy always includes a little boy. I guess he’s a surrogate for me. Sometimes I feel hopeful and optimistic, but it only lasts a few seconds, and then it’s gone just like that. They are very fleeting. I hate the expectations people have put on me. Sometimes I just want to run away and go live on a beach or something. I hide all of these feelings. No one knows I feel them. The only one people really see is the anger when I can’t hold it in. Other than that I seem completely normal. People just assume I am okay, because I look okay. I was always the kid that never had any problems so my parents paid more attention to my siblings who had more problems. I think that has caused me to crave attention. I don’t seek it out, but whenever I get it I am happy. It’s a great feeling. I won’t lie, I get excited whenever I get a notification here or on any other social media. I get excited in anticipation. Anyways, I think I am rambling now. I just wanted to say whatever came to mind. Thank you for anyone who reads this novel. I appreciate you taking the time.",2.2989075630252103,4.554363540616247,4.071753501400561,84.03746218487396,78.85994397759103,6.937142857142858,26.166386554621855,8.005294315242164,1.7782551260504205,2824,114,547,51,70,949,299,714,0.16699999999999998,0.645,0.188,0.8901,4,4,2,0,2,1,71.0,0,2,4,5,30,53,13,8,35,2,53,12,11,2,6,117,117,47,2,12,22,1,17,8,1,4,0,1,1,6,23,33,0,6,30,6,4,11,22,29,0,4,18,23,107,23,70,93,10,81,0,4,5,1,30,42,3,13,34,373,130,6,0.0,0.18366695880969905,0.050423964468073935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15522473514532478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17197942581810424,0.0,0.0,0.10541524711202577,0.0,0.03952858285680831,0.0,0.051244278181236766,0.10838981612079013,0.0,0.04252127061889165,0.09199724233347133,0.0,0.058783830626852974,0.04854710807140887,0.0,0.043143573417750825,0.12599395259410345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0573954268901729,0.0650784895061002,0.0,0.0,0.0590984706054748,0.0,0.05308090004187185,0.0,0.0,0.0541766213732504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044504617395115985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043164937160163265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064280776443802,0.04673986167410143,0.08707099365373869,0.04937436604374737,0.0,0.0,0.04871132456519415,0.0,0.3657735292472298,0.18457077470309416,0.0,0.0,0.0944536937935396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039921299777363854,0.0,0.18897371067702665,0.0,0.11746449648465325,0.0,0.0,0.05696804977280601,0.05692202132161351,0.0,0.0913859355353688,0.05500530985390553,0.0,0.05101494323836931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051321493250578235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05393165787151165,0.15382807636722326,0.0,0.0,0.053807952290186895,0.11358929727188155,0.08423839509355954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019528158341314,0.2071538107454689,0.045626912086433234,0.0,0.04339107560565905,0.05780723061726311,0.05640558435192861,0.0,0.0,0.04889285579855197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05217352046833187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970454650843094,0.0,0.0,0.09698047057538857,0.050627133410999815,0.0,0.05882838509350361,0.0,0.0,0.10504190819210613,0.15719412315594308,0.0,0.0,0.057375124722501177,0.11191047413820436,0.0,0.1074676089833792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888536123610818,0.060401259306971176,0.10388832893167904,0.0,0.0,0.05168551806822918,0.0,0.033102108457174394,0.0,0.0,0.055475891076122295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041091278589088016,0.0,0.0,0.12352657041711833,0.04703982483235911,0.0,0.0,0.10608017631011776,0.0427432277249872,0.0,0.05170885158164603,0.10534524560001401,0.08756224787890148,0.0795585441977956,0.3066268162173626,0.0,0.03657337843697681,0.0,0.041264954611433716,0.0,0.11837913756420244,0.0,0.0,0.11304054535824025,0.0,0.04869981024604122,0.0,0.038850563730921474,0.04153162256372027,0.0,0.04757220715400055,0.0,0.0,0.0343282718652753,0.13243613293506676,0.0,0.04102142703704242,0.15065043799950378,0.0,0.0,0.04937436604374737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526885573991773,0.15238605058173316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03761749289740128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jannahfirebrace,2020/01/09,"start of a new era (hopefully) Just got accepted for uni; last day of my full time job on the 24th and moving to the city 4hrs away live around early feb. 

I’m so nervous but I need to do it especially for my mental health, my passion for study is what is making me move and finally planning to see someone about my issues. I also need to do it because mental health and studying do not work! 

I also finally got my license yesterday, so it’s kind of going well !! I’m a little apprehensive though don’t want to get ahead of myself. 

Anyway hope you all are doing well!",3.901239130434785,4.7911590695652215,5.510163043478261,81.16089673913045,71.34782608695653,8.184782608695654,26.54891304347826,8.472884824447931,1.7830217391304353,443,14,88,7,8,151,79,115,0.016,0.8390000000000001,0.145,0.9376,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,3,11,9,0,2,4,0,8,3,0,1,1,15,22,9,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,2,2,0,2,1,11,7,17,20,2,19,0,0,1,1,1,5,0,2,11,60,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346042963779945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057875273805086,0.0,0.0,0.13781327918559869,0.0,0.0,0.08941644752045658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459824383482512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213675821202834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663568669355822,0.0,0.08336319140073084,0.0,0.23463120181785574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118338240850092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913781503590395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15309868946789212,0.14556000331195082,0.0,0.0,0.15274751980005427,0.0,0.11956602486083555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470146579721771,0.12952356223763647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791187965093402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295643438842883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31180111521304843,0.0,0.2175268121724522,0.0,0.1416671212452245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688716665809425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428382443814892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382281074048264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14411506450855546,0.0,0.08553189549795494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651729080101185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637708297923324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10678679445346803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sunomonious,2020/01/09,"I feel not updated when I’m being productive (I’m mentally fine. Just I’ve wondered since I was a teenager.)

When I study or work or anything that’s appropriate for my life at the moment, I feel like I’m left behind from the world. 
When I talk to people and interact with them whether that’s my family or friends, however, I feel I’m updated which is so false that I clearly know talking and playing around don’t improve myself and my head also tells me it’s not what I should be doing now, while my heart (of course technically the head) doesn’t feel this type of anxiety. 
By my nature I am a type of person who’s often drawn to quiet places and be alone. So it makes me more suffering and to waste time. 

I really have no idea if it goes the same for you or not. It’s okay if you leave your experience or just a sentence to say same or not. I really want your answers and I genuinely thank you for it.",3.072051671732524,4.201708180851068,4.773738601823709,84.75500000000002,73.57446808510637,8.5629179331307,25.662613981762924,9.04235418022936,1.839672036474164,710,23,153,15,14,241,111,188,0.092,0.8029999999999999,0.10400000000000001,0.4918,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,5,1,1,11,7,0,0,7,1,11,4,3,1,1,38,24,22,0,4,15,0,4,1,1,1,1,2,0,1,12,8,0,0,8,1,0,0,7,1,0,0,1,6,26,6,16,19,3,14,0,1,0,0,14,5,0,10,10,106,38,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17661799705627745,0.0,0.1363730467129076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045523896224911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033193498639554,0.151808152039706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16681138913160035,0.16076082234821554,0.0,0.344901043501082,0.1218269048832972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317513132460447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500266419480897,0.0,0.0,0.2020792671935017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19250799037863825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371901196683673,0.0,0.0,0.180567001366192,0.18528170716038586,0.0,0.1204506182831886,0.08331250750936978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138303223217344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17185446779169414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822426201831787,0.14890051023178602,0.17816790379126066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21849219763724426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561256640599592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106445472837453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27413164624022834,0.14905102858957445,0.15700142033216968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943760928736536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058320944703117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18493287318976734,0.12414811436241395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emmaweebler,2020/01/09,"Thoughts On An ESA Kitten in University? I’m looking for some genuine responses, I don’t care if you disagree just be respectful yknow lol 


So I plan on attending University in the fall and I was thinking about getting a kitten to bring with me as an emotional support animal, as I have an anxiety disorder/depression which gets really out of control especially while I’m in school. The schools i have applied to all allow service/therapy animals in the dorms as long as you do what they ask before bringing it (having the proper qualifications, notifying that you will have the animal with you etc.)  which I will happily uphold. 

I have some family pets/low maintenance pets of my own at home who mean the world to me and are the reason why I’m pursuing a career related to animals, and I know it’s going to be very difficult for me to be away from them (I think about them even at work lmao). I think just having an animal with me is going to make me feel less alone when I’m stressed/sad and will help to keep my mood more stable. The reason why I’m choosing a kitten over an adult cat is because it’s going to be easier introducing a younger kitten to my current cat who is older, as I know she would not take to another adult cat well. She’s also too old for me to bring with me to school, and I wouldn’t want to stress her out (shes also a bitch and would be mean to my roommate/friends lol). I know that a kitten will still take time introducing, and I’ve already graduated high school so I am home and able to be hands on with getting the two cats acclimated to each other.

I currently work with animals and am aware of how much a cat costs and the requirements they have, but I guess I’m just looking to see if anyone has any personal experience with having a support animal through school or honestly just any thoughts on the idea, good or bad :)  Its hard to imagine what the situation will be like in school without actually having the kitten and experiencing it first hand, but I’d rather know all the pros and cons before fully committing. I’ll also provide more info if need be !",6.139614608555285,6.155848525423727,7.206964285714285,74.0421494148507,66.16707021791768,10.951129943502824,32.46257062146893,10.686352973137794,3.4148483454398706,1663,63,320,42,24,563,203,413,0.042,0.845,0.114,0.978,2,1,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,4,4,6,18,13,1,1,27,2,36,2,2,6,3,71,77,32,0,9,14,0,4,1,0,8,0,0,4,3,14,22,0,3,18,0,1,8,4,4,1,2,3,8,39,8,57,58,11,35,0,0,3,0,19,17,1,8,11,222,53,12,0.08656112766093063,0.0,0.08447117400428714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896512227865117,0.09552235685263223,0.20766870755031647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177290702339598,0.09076688975624243,0.06621902573238661,0.0,0.0,0.06052555310698862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092296946966132,0.0,0.08132702885552291,0.0,0.0722749259361592,0.05276685999076376,0.0,0.14731428822229511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825483864706192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708566511381607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455497241509668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736961780928446,0.0,0.0,0.0965385387426668,0.05717280844260659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08467339263053357,0.0816021274156469,0.0,0.0437679070162415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362885096861503,0.0,0.0,0.06687691250667384,0.0,0.13567384957213438,0.0,0.14758405095502988,0.07260336701710347,0.0,0.0,0.09535684110633796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754176804598611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05802009924086084,0.091456583909465,0.17365573761372444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771697687251936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693950750860602,0.0,0.0,0.1902869279735614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04228939460368527,0.0,0.0,0.07660387406008991,0.14537909251619816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057780224871843186,0.0,0.0,0.1885808885737565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06363238868178464,0.06418397934851405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090831342331179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558183785518506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554532749039431,0.1779985119417808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5256268948254695,0.0689780116387835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729833425996348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912782836558612,0.0,0.09915547927607396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964570837477045,0.0,0.0,0.1301663906715294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899019335735326,0.0,0.0,0.16639462625994075,0.0,0.1374397327819844,0.050474489645237694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845576439009458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142199573491981,0.051055995815901256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782884934069517,0.0,0.1562159079837159,0.0,0.0,0.08344183812409313,0.0,0.1260350637504245,0.0,0.0,0.12298108306048725,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ksteckff2,2020/01/09,New game plan Just going to marry rich. The stress that I physically feel and the toll to my anxiety struggling with money these past few months and pushed me to my breaking points. Gonna find someone and marry rich. That’s all. Good night,2.8291304347826056,5.525174086956521,2.8762608695652183,90.82743478260872,79.86956521739131,5.419130434782609,20.069565217391304,6.742157984588678,0.28410956521739106,192,5,37,2,5,58,37,46,0.134,0.68,0.18600000000000005,0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,3,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,1,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,3,4,2,2,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409373789870395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15924916870355196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28786037562614203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17899445073433787,0.26416675209673945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513916409411207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041825550141005,0.0,0.2955610687841708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30065727295551514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297731393349843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26685776440025194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36077639356292507,0.3292561605810261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Allisterion,2020/01/09,"Should I worry about possibly having depression? Hi, I (15F) have been worried about myself for a while now. I know a lot of teens often self diagnose themselves for having depression, especially girls, but I think I might need help and I’m not sure if I should tell my parents. I have been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder already (it’s genetic, been being treated since I turned 13) and I’ve heard that can also cause depression. I’ve been having major scares lately with almost attempting suicide and have been contemplating cutting myself or self-harm. I’m tired all the time and I really am tired of living and I feel like it’d be better if I just died, plus I wouldn’t be so financially burdening to my parents. My parents have been struggling with their marriage lately and my mom always talks about leaving my step dad because of his children who have special needs because they’re so mentally taxing to her. I also just lost a best friend when I needed her most after telling her in August I almost tried to commit suicide, even after giving her every last drop of my love and support. I also have very low self-esteem and I just feel like such a mess, since I’m always tired no matter how much I sleep I nap a lot and my parents call me lazy. My mom threatened to put me in a mental hospital last time I had a panic attack and tried to do something to myself. I have antidepressants for my anxiety, (40mg of paroxetine) and apparently they can make you have suicidal thoughts but I just started having them in August, despite for taking them for two years prior with no problem. I also have a lot of other issues but if I brought them all up this post would be too long.
I’m just scared I’m going to go against all my instincts not to hurt myself and end up doing it soon, so I don’t know if I should seek help, like therapy. My mom says I wouldn’t have a reason to be depressed which I agree with but I haven’t talked to her about the full extent of my issues so I’m not sure.

TL;DR: having suicidal thoughts and having a hard time convincing myself to continue living even though I’m young. Not sure if I should see help.",3.9454149571726767,5.594936517814727,4.969302526452172,82.15779457280647,72.18289786223278,7.5733390916288785,26.05923846541424,8.199878495009871,1.7160951702296123,1698,56,317,26,33,556,204,421,0.256,0.615,0.129,-0.9962,5,0,1,0,0,6,37.0,0,1,5,4,27,30,2,4,13,0,44,7,1,4,7,76,74,36,5,16,19,8,3,3,1,8,5,2,0,3,8,19,0,0,8,1,1,5,10,16,0,1,12,6,61,14,41,48,12,36,0,7,1,1,39,7,0,14,25,230,69,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337906172531278,0.0,0.07349393092711594,0.21303759177512135,0.1108318260143976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189649132600577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576626398771638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119657201056854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989180636423503,0.058901626463397985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800528276591572,0.0,0.0,0.06841577764482876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294473534149261,0.13519367821303746,0.06911950914507471,0.0,0.07632851294004131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05898716976721648,0.0,0.0,0.08797635596601952,0.0,0.056112742402911336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06734916601856117,0.09515703819535593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05145441706350468,0.0,0.0,0.06388807132515127,0.0756997796412309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05965984856854074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13392022474604806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712958769468257,0.0,0.0,0.13902463259077033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732024146053963,0.10857455889655196,0.15025371474117089,0.07051899193484043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761109173890163,0.0,0.11761671974149465,0.05893824246408968,0.0,0.0,0.07270095107475677,0.16986090789318511,0.06010842534270858,0.0,0.04445551801277035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423276386576632,0.07065128201961908,0.0,0.2340007178588993,0.0,0.0,0.04895811339455665,0.1481475049493759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813987287713088,0.2958023524290289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508065016370465,0.06378367389916359,0.0,0.0,0.06372648995515763,0.0,0.06695064332439625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0426651863475295,0.06847512337850244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052962398468660576,0.13335493962416692,0.0,0.053070981390162995,0.0,0.20843263448792584,0.0,0.0,0.11018317931867083,0.0,0.06664734940983855,0.0,0.0,0.05127135810893383,0.0,0.0,0.04713929351029412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962399867494867,0.0,0.2913950897584223,0.07557604218963823,0.18830702116073325,0.0,0.050074349295024516,0.10705991240943694,0.11642136385342733,0.0,0.0761620491032377,0.0,0.0,0.04267411166671597,0.0654334271695348,0.10574473411814786,0.11650367865058513,0.22963812986529264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043304114394612,0.07244086196558484,0.06505779217532498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05495135792469007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13526954688102485,0.0,0.04731019795571708,0.0,0.0,0.04288773489152644
mentalhealth,mary_rossi96,2020/01/09,"Electroconvulsive therapy (ECT) transition questions Does anyone have any experience using TMS as one of the transition options to help prevent relapse? I’m done with my acute phase and am down to once a week / once every 10-12 days, but the physical toll & pain every week is becoming to be too much for me. The treatments have REALLY worked, but I’d like to see if it would be possible to try out less/non invasive alternatives, like TMS and therapy, and see if I can maintain my current health.",8.026774193548388,7.771715333333336,8.412387096774196,67.87858064516132,62.33333333333333,12.601290322580645,37.95483870967742,11.979248473330829,4.780726451612903,398,18,70,12,5,132,70,93,0.046,0.856,0.098,0.4497,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,4,0,9,2,0,1,0,14,13,8,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,4,2,11,9,1,6,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,4,6,39,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855585827672044,0.0,0.11646169636715785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974797005348448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891416290645808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044760604598627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986952362863776,0.17525697088723816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28858545333139823,0.0,0.0,0.16752373773643894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820398453405293,0.0,0.0,0.11479100561234805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673365677346405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589474995509295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36476956321111387,0.1160492353131367,0.0,0.1822311869428067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19306829907126985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19184878627549554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097126215571631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27294180550383795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39169818700512665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11627332338914804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791241297730956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747465800990042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467827442234625,0.0,0.0,0.12165717036439508,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hypnotic_Mind,2020/01/09,"I think my mother is losing it a little So, in my house we are three, me (27M), my sister (31) and my mother (60).
Father left when I was 10, it was a big ordeal, my mother did what she could, and we lived.

I'm about to get married, and I wasn't as close to my sister as I am now, so we've been talking more. We started discussing some really erratic behaviors my mother has, usually forgetting specific events or remembering them quite differently. I'm a Neuropsychologist, so I know quite a lot about false memories and how human memory work, but I've never seen a case such as this. I'll exemplify: she is not dealing well with the marriage thing, my fiancee invited her to her graduation party, and I remember her saying yes. Everyone was around and remember her saying yes. When I asked her, she said (and I really believe that she believes it) that she never confirmed or said such thing. I also know that she doesn't really feel like going there, because she doesn't like my fiancee parents, so there is a gain in her not going.

Same goes for a few discussions, when she says that I told her things that I would never say, like that I don't love her, or that I didn't say things that I am positive that I did, I'm very careful with words, I know what I say. My sister has the same experience than me.

Now, to add it up, she has some friends that really idolize her, so she plays this social role as the good and understanding mother to a point where there is a certain cult of personality around her. People kissing her ass, this kind of stuff, because she is so wise and strong and all that. She clearly feeds on it, and wouldn't drop this situation for anything in the world.

She doesn't fill the criteria for narcissistic personality disorder, for example, but I'm still thinking about some personality- related disorder where the patient would be able to distort reality to this degree. I perceived that she behaves and feels exactly like all of these things are true, and really suffers from it, from the things that she thinks I said, but I didn't.

Not exactly sure as to how to deal with that. Perhaps could be some early dementia?  Or a personality thing? Anyone ever saw this kind of situation in a recurring scenario?

If I confront her and tell her to seek a professional, she will play victim and say that I'm trying to convince her that she is crazy, so taking her to a consultation is not a possibility.

Thanks in advance.",7.189279661016954,6.57502570762712,7.973200000000002,71.52603728813563,64.16949152542372,11.365559322033901,33.922372881355926,10.793553405168565,3.5488334576271185,1922,71,365,45,25,648,211,472,0.1,0.762,0.138,0.9711,2,0,0,0,0,0,66.0,3,0,1,7,30,25,2,0,21,2,35,4,1,2,12,78,64,41,0,6,12,10,2,4,3,4,0,10,0,5,39,25,1,0,13,2,0,4,15,4,1,1,15,14,69,21,43,41,11,37,0,2,2,3,77,17,1,10,19,274,108,4,0.07355594819300355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058822665194912825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05143202923752988,0.0,0.06053027798987876,0.1309607773167812,0.06876488223733039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967804659365415,0.0,0.0,0.16574473007843069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499519142973446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745687866026973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15166590551228004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685031027616405,0.168602978435356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653556629807934,0.0,0.07028586066932446,0.0,0.0719518316126153,0.0,0.0,0.07438419503067377,0.05254838408625513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05682914311049591,0.0,0.038429947021040536,0.0,0.08360708091115042,0.06169523950596685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487368840407887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15319440189748695,0.12127327641793052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799187529334981,0.0,0.0,0.14374288333058044,0.07372238393033237,0.06495124986186387,0.0,0.0,0.08229029114509498,0.0,0.06253463676809226,0.06638711506014056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17019264548043858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167517570874239,0.0,0.0,0.05099443291942634,0.2569048671077914,0.0,0.0,0.06953414642595558,0.08292327960330856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15647161016777655,0.0,0.0,0.2356091196006821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24997365128257445,0.0,0.2099056526225856,0.4094624962586121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16535993528470794,0.0,0.07498102606378686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05206327872139555,0.0,0.0587418752430244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420396257456787,0.0,0.0,0.06932561067301561,0.0,0.05530491889043825,0.059121484907739476,0.06429114083033882,0.06772043454280975,0.0,0.0,0.3420711248915136,0.14139504462919106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028586066932446,0.0,0.04993966048380137,0.0,0.0,0.07657433615875614,0.0,0.0,0.08101148502850719,0.06069136066130356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661356311397631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05354960633162144,0.0,0.0,0.10450407034611192,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moeduck,2020/01/09,"Feel like a disappointment to my family I'm a 17 year old with a traditional indian family. All my life I've been told that education and hard work is our only key to success and excelling in school is a must. Over the years I think I've pleased them with my grades but once I entered highschool it went downhill. My grades were average but to them it was just not my best. They've told me to my face that my grades are litteral shit and my dad has gone into fits of rage where he yells at me saying I'll never amount to anything if I keep this up and that when I end up on the streets he'll walk past me. He has anger issues and I know he loves me dearly but the things he says to me when he's mad makes me think otherwise. When I was more of a younger teenager I was caught with porn and stuff and I'd talk to my male friends in a flirty way. I was about 13. This kind of shattered my parents image of me and they and I had gotten over it. Or at least I thought. I once wore black leggings and a t shirt to go out once with my dad to volunteer at this area. I often wear this type of outfit a lot but suddenly my dad started to object saying I shouldn't wear ""black"" and I was confused because I wore this all the time and he began hitting me with metal hangers and whipping me with pairs of Jeans. My mom ran up to us once she heard the commotion and tried to stop him hitting me and he yelled ""she is a very vulgar girl she doesnt deserve anything"" and that broke me because the first thing he came to was to slut shame me or just shame me of my sexuality. This was still when I was 13. Fast forward to my freshman year of high school I had gotten my very first unofficial transcript and had gotten a 3.6 gpa. I didnt know what this meant so I looked it up and it had said it was a good gpa. I excitedly showed my parents because I wanted to be praised so bad and they shut me down so fast and said my grades were pathetic. I often go to parties and my friends often talk about their school life to the other parents and my own. My parents look almost bitter when they hear all these successful stories about them getting scholarships or winning the science fair and whatnot. I feel guilty because I've done nothing to make them proud. Whenever other parents ask me what my grades are like in school I just laugh and awkwardly look at my parents and again they just try to flash a smile. I get mostly Bs and to most this would seem ok but to them it's not. junior year came and I had loaded up with 4 aps.  1 of them being ap physics and this fucked me over. I ended up passing the semester with a D and I did horrible in math with a C. My semester gpa ended up as a 3.1 weighted and a 2.5 unweighted. My parents knew I had worked my ass off studying for physics and math for my final exams so they weren't that mad. Atleast at the moment. I've done some calculation and I've found that the max final gpa I can get for college is probably a 3.7 and this isnt good enough for them or me because I wanted a 4. Nearly all of my friends have gpas as high as 4.8 and I feel so fucking inferior to them. I had gotten a 1210 or something on the psat too. When I go to bed I can hear my parents talking about me sometimes. They sound sad. They say things like ""what is this child doing..what is she going to do"" and it breaks me because I dont want to displease them. Nearing the new year I was set on really pleasing them I really wanted to wow them with a dramatic school performance change by studying more and such. Well shortly before the new years I damaged our plumbing somehow and water leaked though the ceiling from the 2nd floor. Repairs are going to cost about 10k and I feel almost like something worse than shit. My mom came to me and said ""I know it was an accident but I dont know what we are going to do. I had just thought about saving for your college fees and your future but i have to throw it away here."" And i dont know what to do. I feel so guilty like I've done nothing to make them happy despite all they do for me.I dont know how to fight off this feeling for now. It hurts so bad and I cant concentrate on anything. What I want is a way to cope but what I really want is just reassurance from them. They dont tell me I make them happy or proud and atleast once I just want to hear it. I dont have the guts to ask them in person or to say it anyway at all. Because of me they cant be at peace. I dont want to feel this way but I cant help it.",2.2963206214689293,3.6114347648305127,3.5938000000000017,91.71504180790964,75.82203389830508,6.517717514124295,24.027344632768358,7.0316486544052195,0.6907618531073445,3494,108,791,35,75,1142,353,944,0.15,0.73,0.12,-0.987,9,0,2,0,1,0,63.0,4,2,26,13,41,53,10,4,39,1,69,18,9,5,8,143,148,78,0,12,26,13,9,5,3,4,2,15,1,4,47,59,2,2,21,1,3,18,18,23,1,2,53,30,143,30,114,86,17,102,1,6,5,6,91,44,5,20,42,528,190,29,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08815357924259333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866702320155344,0.0,0.08230013476104793,0.0,0.04135553526019898,0.0,0.07350491687802807,0.18782700397874846,0.0,0.037455328976367226,0.0,0.046193254106302505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15103158449851728,0.0,0.0,0.046564278823499436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351343952812772,0.3611141757564977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695831588048522,0.04548145374910915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299085076967888,0.0,0.15579465684939453,0.031445840893379234,0.0,0.0964372116562269,0.0,0.07488188331114007,0.0,0.04826250253357696,0.10202255826324233,0.08138624037942266,0.06899138882640125,0.0,0.15009566952105022,0.07383894744314362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371409014993652,0.03943069564561103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883148735286542,0.0,0.029503749168290412,0.09301301262005653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04712123969687074,0.0,0.0,0.04594243956747311,0.0,0.03912444067429397,0.0,0.04583705923209177,0.1451439552773816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218119029898469,0.10752271257641098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088988995276212,0.0,0.0,0.0374217832256625,0.03972717132699967,0.0,0.11752708346322252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310464305149833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03394871820870469,0.08502402181400229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447123179490798,0.0,0.04618856526999735,0.2343839928877207,0.0,0.033477004919167615,0.0,0.0,0.3910064410064625,0.0,0.042019323779306096,0.0,0.0384340532838546,0.0,0.09663516415965458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04745790253809306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459548680885277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561108908993582,0.17502091144935758,0.0,0.22273838813252275,0.0,0.04007153488168127,0.0,0.0,0.09036588678667068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777306230028031,0.04353405936884845,0.0,0.03115554564671933,0.0,0.0351521306466594,0.036800285113896006,0.0,0.0,0.0503890739126365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061378864517005,0.03847290493435891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772906032576926,0.05640878914212951,0.043246599072524095,0.06988935653010382,0.025666737930048214,0.0,0.0,0.08412049314528441,0.0,0.059769473225486223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05294717831903846,0.0,0.0,0.07263747131882765,0.20769951293413694,0.1048162283174442,0.0,0.0536009965555577,0.03957667909997987,0.040804313266340944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408997840326418,0.0,0.04485720800784607,0.03126850069661713,0.0,0.0,0.17007350122532786
mentalhealth,Countryguy2019,2020/01/09,"Is it so wrong to expect some support and help from people these days. Seems to me that besides one close friend everyone else seems lost in the own world and no one has time to talk and be sociable or have I scared them away................ I start to think its me that's the problem and I shouldn't be here wasting peoples time.

Sorry, just talking out loud. 

Have a good day.",1.9955791505791505,4.0457713378378415,2.4058301158301165,96.64283783783787,78.86486486486487,5.3096525096525085,21.382239382239387,6.1826913282559595,0.033759073359073355,285,8,63,2,7,87,58,74,0.175,0.636,0.18899999999999997,0.3109,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,1,3,7,0,1,3,0,7,0,0,0,0,15,13,6,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,1,1,6,3,8,9,2,10,0,1,0,0,5,5,0,4,5,42,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891100579895585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596190945173243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814438786893593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19233255278556455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15550914597860482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16882489302828174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491436348291005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197219103563916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727863325428712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790857042325741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19259866489032007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015173230646848,0.0,0.0,0.3664771952546069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22531752022524046,0.14246767710482974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22841121225508135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3235639717147694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289726915474768,0.0,0.0,0.23473705601028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22006909758981136,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,usernamesforusername,2020/01/09,"How do I stop being paranoid? For background, I have OCD, and have struggled with paranoia all my life. I wouldn't consider myself easily scared either by most things... Problem is, my paranoia is that bad things will happen if I get paranoid they will... I'm paranoid of my paranoia. I also get paranoid that things are in the room with me, not tangibly, but can hurt me somehow if I don't get rid of them ""right"". My intrusive thoughts get visual; not like hallucinations, but like an image you have trouble ""turning off"". It's not really like fear; I'm not scared of monsters, even though I'm paranoid of things in the room, but I can't ignore them because I think something bad might happen. And I get anxiety, and it takes a while to fall asleep. 

Is there anything that can be done about paranoia? I feel like I'm in danger sometimes.",5.108492377188028,6.171879397515532,5.289610389610392,83.20766233766237,68.68944099378882,7.593675889328063,30.785431959345,7.686295010490155,1.9895291925465848,657,26,124,7,11,207,92,161,0.33399999999999996,0.631,0.035,-0.9925,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,3,0,7,15,1,4,4,0,19,2,1,1,1,27,35,12,0,4,10,0,1,4,0,4,1,0,2,0,9,5,0,2,3,0,0,1,7,11,0,0,2,1,21,4,14,27,3,10,0,1,0,0,4,7,0,5,6,89,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873428570299492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358189897307686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218112349580387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24793851148288645,0.0905081295641317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15194004355643814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806541368909344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670740801230785,0.07507271419353445,0.10606957077945736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3878566445457325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625894314283666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15894406151165566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487129582465256,0.290146808557417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750702840192274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420691851074209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511599118537677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679564467581242,0.0,0.0,0.297295953625975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430223241563385,0.1468441886225211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12413057929751345,0.0,0.15521684565759697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163367077230216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3945570546807953,0.09513588892059703,0.1458745599091201,0.11787145515261725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16149664347074014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eye-oh-dine,2020/01/09,"I don’t know what to do anymore. I’ve gone to therapy. I’ve taken medication. I’ve tried to get out and live. I’ve done what I’m supposed to do and I’ve done it for over a decade. 

After all that-I’m worse. I don’t want to continue. I don’t get it. Is this supposed to happen? Is this just an inevitable falling through the cracks that has to happen to someone? I guess I do hear even the most highly treatable illnesses still have casualties (or other horrible consequences.) Did something go wrong somewhere? Or is it just what it is?

Ok, the real question: Should I take a break from reddit? My phone says I’ve averaged 3hrs a day during break. Yikes. Is distracting myself on here better than staring at a wall and drowning in my thoughts? With chronic fatigue, it’s always one or the other",1.3592238507661565,3.900136221518988,2.9632844770153253,88.62865089940041,85.51898734177216,5.6047968021319114,24.1385742838108,7.0608816371341465,1.1448936708860762,625,25,122,9,19,205,97,158,0.132,0.826,0.042,-0.93,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,9,1,17,4,0,0,1,19,31,6,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,13,5,0,0,3,0,0,3,3,3,0,1,6,3,9,2,19,24,2,16,0,1,1,0,4,7,0,6,4,81,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15484680197371026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18455725289391847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164586812595191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001654181733623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38088169274597455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291467045638307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19445498613731665,0.0,0.10576266050183504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205005753952304,0.0,0.32912820346299465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097437470263149,0.0,0.0,0.19662066948457094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227350938823962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16432620092574032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18747216850531429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610348382770678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20847013986931906,0.0,0.0,0.21181801987680826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14799102970051328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576785594344025,0.14326581310653344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861652723341445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992105206751346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128170248475202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773945799312546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634698639791356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976425807092756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896477497345251,0.0,0.2034667912442672,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sotired0135,2020/01/09,"All I feel is dread currently I feel like I've just fucked up my life and there's nowhere to go from here. And I really just want to self harm, and I'm having intense suicide ideation (which I've struggled with for awhile). I can't see my psychologist until 12 hrs from now.

I'm going to try to distract myself now, but I just needed to vent. I feel like throwing up. I hate myself and I hate what life is putting me through.",2.549951845906904,3.8719985056179818,3.555088282504016,92.21988764044943,75.17977528089888,6.434028892455858,25.07383627608347,6.868970318607317,0.7504914927768858,333,11,75,3,7,107,56,89,0.247,0.674,0.08,-0.9490000000000001,1,1,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,0,7,9,3,3,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,15,17,6,1,2,4,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,4,1,7,0,0,0,4,13,2,13,17,1,10,0,0,1,1,1,2,1,0,6,45,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33808409967968506,0.3184506801227115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20604874019217612,0.0,0.0,0.25333539976726466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4400952262570712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148531217322377,0.21777557842828174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16526251273449852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22405571154428366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278247692030505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760630678500866,0.0,0.2325121906245849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330023101957186,0.0,0.24379427491080985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15132072206120994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314602529220281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marblemenow1,2020/01/09,"Dealing with Family Issues Content Warnings: Emotional Abuse, Depression, Family Issues

Disclaimer: I'm aware that I wasn't supposed to blow a budget. I did it just so I can get a dose of happiness in my life because I've been feeling depressed for far too long. I haven't had therapy in nearly a month either, which doesn't help.

I've been feeling depressed for the past two weeks due to being physically and emotionally isolated from my friends. I want them to enjoy their vacations and I don't want to take away their joy. I don't want to burden them with any of my problems and that I've been feeling depressed for two weeks. 

As much as my mom wants me to go out and enjoy myself, I either have no motivation in doing so or end up splurging at Barnes and Nobles and end up buying three books in total. I knew that I had a budget and blew it, which made my mom angry but what pushed her over the edge was when I slammed one of the car doors. 

I didn't want to show how frustrated I've become with my family but I've had enough of having no privacy. For example, I was calling a hotline and although I told her nonverbally to get out of my bedroom, she insisted on staying and attempted to comfort me. She reassured me by getting me water and tissues so that I can somewhat feel better. She told me that she isn't judgemental yet she judges the crap out of me. 

I'm tired of being told that I'm being a drama queen for simply wanting to express how I feel and I want to fix it. I'm sick of having no privacy and I want to get a vacation from this vacation before I go back to school where I can at least get a level of privacy and independence from my family. At least I'll see my friends and not have to put up with my sister. I'm tired of her as well.

I'm not willing to share too much because I don't have the mental energy to spill the tea on my family but I thought I can receive some support.",4.143436028257455,4.751203834183677,5.702244897959182,81.03396389324962,70.60714285714286,8.887912087912088,29.10753532182104,9.057496981413335,2.3035145996860287,1501,55,305,28,26,512,178,392,0.125,0.748,0.127,-0.7598,0,0,0,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,4,4,14,20,2,0,14,0,31,8,1,5,1,54,66,28,0,9,9,3,5,0,2,1,5,0,2,0,13,21,2,0,8,3,3,6,13,8,1,4,17,6,53,12,60,45,10,39,0,4,1,0,27,21,1,3,11,222,66,3,0.0,0.10007453066732663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057437556805449486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07935552078045847,0.06494663038197585,0.0,0.10297539977650944,0.09328245597095483,0.07187156733003476,0.0,0.0,0.07470042616781361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624589691820055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707737203153187,0.2909905228817877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900184191697603,0.14961782838993073,0.08727258456225158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3981197523744428,0.0,0.21353448562068425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051140057223073,0.0,0.22064146734891973,0.0,0.09600423858454024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991215301077528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05661359151791665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763143044752374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059658528270502914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474686343993088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992068299168109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851185720031624,0.0,0.0,0.1978434710796574,0.06741735002413816,0.0,0.12417965867948105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057234135801296424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062923863443895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08081943137490988,0.0,0.0849083784069953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548079804478965,0.06730586513519812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002603841191169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584731184207353,0.0,0.0,0.06350546592696751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965904995740858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705397777543891,0.0,0.19415498003807846,0.0,0.2421232913509477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501564024055526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3985464801999205,0.0,0.13550182415159895,0.0,0.07594214319751688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunnybuns04,2020/01/09,"I've somewhat lost my faith in God and religion bc of my mental health. Pretty much I began having panic attacks last year which led me into severe health anxiety and depression. I was raised Catholic and always had faith in God. At first , I prayed to God and trusted that he was going to take this all away from me. However , time kept passing by and I kept getting worse. I began to have very intrusive thoughts and began to feel afraid almost Paranoia about my life.  I was desperate. I felt suicidal. I talked to any person who was religious, priests, pastors from different churches, sisters, nuns, etc. Just to explain to me as to why God would let me go through something like that and why he  lets bad things happen to good ppl. I didn't feel God's love. I wanted answers, comfort, anything to make me feel better. But I would get the same advice, "" God is good. Pray harder."" Like sister, I've prayed , ugly cried, and begged God every night and day. I've distanced myself from church and religion as my perspective on it has changed since I got depressed.
The thing is , I know God doesn't work miracles just like that with just anyone. Or else no one would be dying right ? But I can't help feel resentment and questioning God and his plans for me and others. I don't trust God. If he does exist, then I'm terrified of him and definitely don't feel loved.",3.501148357119149,5.614971305343512,4.030471291072022,86.45526883504816,74.49618320610688,6.999269830733489,25.51344175240624,7.893859768569023,1.4968398274145378,1070,37,204,16,23,337,163,262,0.193,0.625,0.182,-0.8025,2,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,5,4,21,2,2,2,0,21,5,0,2,1,46,48,21,2,5,7,2,6,3,0,3,3,0,0,1,10,16,0,2,11,0,0,4,6,8,0,2,15,6,28,13,28,27,5,21,10,3,0,2,15,7,0,5,13,119,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942891424014584,0.0,0.0,0.1121352317253326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317918668719798,0.0,0.0,0.07615257420940905,0.0,0.0856670193884827,0.0,0.0,0.0783014197833345,0.11474026023710365,0.09215282338167877,0.0,0.0,0.12739732097864814,0.10521212114974246,0.0,0.09350148862800174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904024585320086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846362316445178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230085423190917,0.07222004983640619,0.0,0.192902332728467,0.0,0.1162211230828183,0.11699885255591808,0.0,0.0,0.09799745646738724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354778849516587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489112877659005,0.0,0.0,0.09435087172907017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28311094111430485,0.0,0.10752165659513616,0.0,0.0,0.09525305052011848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170134431231055,0.0,0.1272855307545632,0.18785278040964504,0.08956338089134437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902657957284526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23806630443815704,0.0,0.0,0.07506013432869901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615431659096171,0.09128144375775016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290212937837572,0.07909721015348901,0.1641283459265355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224314506289202,0.0,0.20213884000266008,0.0,0.07474981079261317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285296122579437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232070790301317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508886548224727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588287204977526,0.0,0.0,0.13138842991878985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777961390015656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392740967388593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254470730683061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563323953047073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265094039644987,0.0,0.09263385261007732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621031739236915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249169956292907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841976047673333,0.09000804122651634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14879363331130036,0.0,0.0,0.08890233677376236,0.0652984400667126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239805970740887,0.06605072990857891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20209525993501956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152527261251757,0.0,0.11412068478056475,0.2386494525652617,0.0,0.0,0.07211365904103148
mentalhealth,throwaway_lex,2020/01/09,"how to stop feeling suicidal/self harming from math??? I've found when i'm frustrated with a Math problem i punch myself really hard in the leg, stomach or head and it makes me feel slightly better. sometimes it gets so bad i actually contemplate suicide. i'm not depressed. i'm for the most part a happy person when not doing schoolwork. also the thing is i'm 15 and i'm taking Algebra 1 (9th grade)so like what's going to happen when i'm doing Chemistry or Trigonometry? i do online school so i have to mostly teach myself math and i just don't get it. i'm going to a public high school in next year and i'm afraid of being behind. sorry for ranting i've just been staring at the bruises on my legs and i need help",0.9165986394557812,3.3756860000000017,3.1677891156462614,86.8968537414966,86.95918367346941,5.1714285714285735,21.77210884353741,6.691623216298621,0.7740721088435367,570,20,108,7,18,194,95,147,0.165,0.7290000000000001,0.106,-0.8707,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,1,9,9,1,1,7,0,8,4,4,2,0,22,27,14,1,2,6,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,3,0,0,2,3,6,0,0,2,4,10,3,14,24,3,13,0,1,1,0,3,5,0,4,7,65,15,6,0.0,0.0,0.1778174217359979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457187992911053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214351093872303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16115605162491106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15694315994445748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842686921816421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997914396483676,0.0,0.0,0.19040163236980026,0.0,0.2071161414097362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611338141621146,0.19397329192955395,0.1632305627726714,0.0,0.18700712205964684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12213615564704935,0.19252217272057387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902197943669977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163120419654505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511153194023398,0.0,0.0,0.1937897539128861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19732315959714036,0.0,0.0,0.15910477977724272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435697656786395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673282023683285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36882648759453296,0.0,0.0,0.19009198002778208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18021718598177935,0.20397691550257446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234149819024634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993157275441932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700444121160962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105682010783815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734171759330407
mentalhealth,French-Cookie,2020/01/09,"Messed up Empathy, drives me crazy. Hello !

I’ll make it short. My empathy is totally on the blink.
I’m way too empathic when it comes to fictionnal characters, like I can get sick as hell for a death in a movie or a TV show. I can even cry for a « I love you ». I had several anxiety attacks because of these. Same for real people I don’t know, like wars in the world, dying kids on the news. I’m super sensitive about animals too, just thinking about animal abuse makes me wanna cry.

But when it comes to close people, I feel nothing. I don’t hate them, I don’t love them either. My grand uncle is dead I felt nothing same for my grandpa, I even found the funerals untertaining (not the death of course but all the people the big church and all). My grandma found out she has cancer. I was like « oh ok damn ». My other grandparents have had health problems I was indifferent.. I avoid my mother and I’m fine with that. I think I would be indifferent to my cat’s death.

It’s fucked up I guess. You might think I am.

Are some people like this ? Or people you know ? My family complains I don’t talk to them but I just can’t speak my mind out loud it’s like blocked. I can’t bring myself to a therapist. I feel trapped I would like to tell em everything sometimes but the whole family would know and it could be a mess.

I don’t know what to do, any advice ?

Thanks for reading, if it’s too long, here is for you :

**TLDR : I have too much empathy for fictionnal characters (like way too much) and a little bit for strangers living far away and absolutely no empathy for people I know and my family. 
I feel stuck. **",0.20433073061907334,2.588934561349696,2.284821528165089,91.87796291132182,91.4233128834356,6.1538204127161205,18.452035694366984,7.520522993642371,0.6511006134969324,1241,36,268,26,44,414,164,326,0.22399999999999998,0.672,0.10400000000000001,-0.9918,3,2,0,0,1,0,49.0,0,4,3,1,14,25,6,1,15,1,29,6,0,2,3,58,59,16,7,7,11,2,4,7,0,4,3,2,0,1,12,12,0,2,14,3,0,4,9,11,0,0,8,6,47,14,32,44,11,24,2,0,0,3,18,15,3,6,10,172,59,1,0.0,0.1115065355046051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196450136160723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399893084200778,0.0,0.07199490898637331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706522293454117,0.08842069142255414,0.0,0.0,0.057369392565281126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274519649822526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621371532583219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514023818880143,0.0,0.2067537512575132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767270109746017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431929025822792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458119404879867,0.0,0.266159355475564,0.0,0.1427565468069348,0.0,0.09036163433592784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063764290294964,0.0,0.08700440704435126,0.04916928502920896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367423894793434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291545332389274,0.0,0.100035941737525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586056255969053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3218462907503111,0.09432427545420896,0.08310202758574821,0.08328556453319186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16987829730141316,0.0,0.1256400856053672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983724763396043,0.09502561402778127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13836531060559004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806047164817826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3914696742743925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09005183170957083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413679672543082,0.10711929583837773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631901389076374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307851066623046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564312126652542,0.08225744955123672,0.08664506736150954,0.0,0.10927050644030484,0.0,0.1809082184600465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940238465977515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507193776653906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20056196351560893,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dariahwatson,2020/01/09,"I'm constantly crying because I fear death. Hi guys,

Ever since I was little I couldn't cope with death. 
I remember when my friend lost her father, I went to the funeral with my mother and when I saw the open casket I actually started hysterically crying telling my Mother I need to leave the place. I always knew I hate funerals and visiting graves, it gives me a huge anxiety and makes me feel sad that I burst into tears just by going by a cemetery. Over the years I stopped going to cemeteries, talking or thinking about death, so I've been better. 

I'm now 19 years old, and my past month has been terrible.  I can't sleep, and I cry multiple times a day because of the thoughts that I'm going to lose my family someday, that I will die someday and that noone knows what will come after death. But what is giving me the most fear is losing my father and just that thought brings to cry about an hour, even tho he is perfectly safe and healthy in his early 40ies. Up until now I would get these thoughts every once in a while (myb every 3 to 6 months but then it would be because if my grandfather who's been gone since I was 7)

I don't know what is causing me to feel this way, I have a normal relationship to my family, I don't have any suicidal thoughts and no recent deaths occurred in my family either, and I get to see them everyday.

I'm actually not a person who easily cries or gets emotional in front of others,can someone please explain what is going on with me?",6.92939393939394,5.749153454545457,7.507757575757576,76.50163636363638,64.95959595959596,10.882962962962964,32.594612794612786,10.047579312681364,2.9519909764309764,1164,38,234,22,15,387,170,297,0.17300000000000001,0.736,0.091,-0.9487,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,5,12,13,1,2,13,0,22,1,1,2,2,49,57,22,11,6,9,4,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,15,16,0,2,12,0,0,10,6,9,0,0,14,4,38,4,28,37,2,48,0,5,2,0,21,12,0,4,25,147,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.17310270838450842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07379949372677627,0.0,0.0,0.060314128320431995,0.0,0.06784973001723534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16219887704325828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844155183580162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911119113467672,0.0,0.0764009721605623,0.0,0.09584538095528262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4871242425463742,0.05719950242473621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204909753787063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997674340142128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058580741324026124,0.08022769263240842,0.14945497624185747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508349640944256,0.1996080595890699,0.089691463793888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685238178571515,0.0,0.13901494264005898,0.1701643828682872,0.20162459155100948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781979138530696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756575306801741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734451745374516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748645911065354,0.0,0.0,0.09391284236781923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889346085361033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19844905670580149,0.09681864092133977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059203115940322834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158745345496868,0.0,0.0,0.06576456874838306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690008811917851,0.0,0.0,0.09306814750159352,0.09445491062376137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466728941567535,0.0,0.07744310998179854,0.09266507245042097,0.09735803287327302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757341521382822,0.09522284787227442,0.10047162431119262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706766584837898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467351598063213,0.0,0.08875682773716466,0.0,0.07514910033338604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277720255634325,0.0,0.0,0.07415113119578755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701550029432213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128789282261833,0.07752139453380137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05683074888316723,0.0,0.281648624689378,0.05171747027851792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040019638760517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221909088481341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600960510357115,0.0,0.0,0.11423047822641445
mentalhealth,krikeu,2020/01/09,"I feel like my mental health may be deteriorating I should start off by saying I have severe ADHD. Emphasis on the hyperactivity because I can never sit still thus at school im moving constantly, I think people think im weird due to my constant movement. The medication I take helps me pay attention and maintain good grades but since it is a stimulant it gives me anxiety so I don't to great socially at school. I also have bad self image issues and see myself as ugly and have many insecurities, I feel like I will never get a partner. When the meds wear off I go into this weird phase where I get cranky and I think I sometimes get really impulsive and upset my family and it makes me feel terrible, like a monster. Im sorry for the paragraph but I needed to get this off my chest, even if no one sees it.",2.7181573498964826,4.888979490683234,4.940099378881989,78.76178467908905,77.07453416149067,7.77159420289855,23.15569358178054,8.648137234880735,1.7355139544513458,642,20,122,14,15,223,103,161,0.22399999999999998,0.706,0.07,-0.9785,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,6,11,0,2,7,0,10,4,2,3,2,25,28,13,0,3,3,0,3,3,1,3,2,1,0,2,6,7,0,0,7,0,1,3,4,6,0,1,0,6,23,5,13,24,0,20,0,0,2,0,6,8,0,2,11,78,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478668224953861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839281626352056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412313259267634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273093513195357,0.07500234418249335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659190389632513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126492001689553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598853612898938,0.0,0.18663393804866024,0.1757956217458491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571274663416703,0.11802850775673104,0.06992488459305278,0.10319777835516156,0.0,0.13564896373178387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078280590612934,0.0,0.0,0.08246925160085651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39870391599060745,0.12841888623155714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803293049779768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212829631208685,0.12474042440353965,0.0,0.0,0.13666660894387556,0.12394704978999647,0.12399257390714895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076908783668767,0.0,0.09123053581247632,0.18978777019222304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337320101059012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529851294696977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882079038093169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784413160101894,0.0,0.2490404601434543,0.19608946110727976,0.0,0.1283546485081699,0.13899703162979232,0.0,0.10177765555551647,0.0,0.0,0.1254209460978736,0.0,0.0,0.12168695154020735,0.13773008881956614,0.08708637393998522,0.0,0.0982576787129564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250867339697498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365118377528984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kyasurinaa,2020/01/09,"What is exactly does it mean to feel normal or okay? I'm currently at a place where I'm not sure if I'm in denial of my progress through therapy due to the fact that I have an attachment to my therapist or if I'm genuinely not at my best? After our session today she reassured me that I am improving and that my bad moods may not be exactly stemmed from trauma but at this point, I don't know. All I know is that I'm terrible to myself in the way that I constantly beat myself up to the point it tears me up but like that's normal...

I'm currently not happy with my life but I feel like I discredit all the good things going. It's just so annoying how unsatisfied or even ungrateful I feel and it really gets me down. Maybe I'm trying to find problems within me to account for my feelings? Also what even is happiness. After coming out of bad depression during my middle school years I feel like I'm in that stage where I'm definitely not depressed but not quite happy..idk

Insight on what you think about my situation is very much needed.. thank you",5.1096493738819335,5.218549925581396,6.50186046511628,77.9042754919499,68.34883720930233,10.522361359570665,30.0268336314848,10.389873798559362,2.9593005366726297,834,29,169,21,13,285,120,215,0.18,0.667,0.153,-0.8731,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,2,0,4,9,20,1,0,6,1,9,1,0,1,6,44,32,14,0,6,16,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,16,5,0,0,11,0,1,2,7,8,0,0,0,5,27,11,28,30,4,30,0,2,0,0,5,18,0,6,11,115,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711422279714268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22367373334271834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405649858546268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538009263967848,0.0,0.1447448719692364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307299357743796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721448111568675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769362658543802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3386281976811367,0.19137790856616085,0.0,0.0,0.12242153723709992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997972454417327,0.0,0.07612293205740535,0.11234509024825233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28516977232196683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472232141190944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460794983923967,0.19631345136551706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13456381461345526,0.1459032674126765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984635664002042,0.09931708746650976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624715349567941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994199735211066,0.0,0.2532389862852757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816542632235622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424649398102108,0.0,0.0,0.08580735893663208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135557535327907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15055762001871287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262397560969334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233167808616257,0.15317557109719118,0.15551822518778374,0.0889858224417589,0.08582530935786824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696236656821433,0.0,0.0,0.09093855067176017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11051705845349613,0.0,0.10631777255376826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625494406236013
mentalhealth,BoxCowFish,2020/01/09,"So I wrote a poem... I wear a cloak of depression
I put it on first thing in the morning
And take it off last thing at night 
Perhaps it’s also there whilst sleeping,
But the cloak of sleep is too heavy to discern
Sometimes I forgot that it is even on,
As it is able to glide effortlessly along with my daily movements
Until,
It’ll snag on something sharp
Or I’ll trip on the hem
And the reminder that my cloak is around me-
Especially tight around my gut,
And rather heavy on my chest -
Is felt again.",3.092352941176472,4.5333450490196086,3.611911764705884,91.87610294117648,74.0,6.276470588235295,23.534313725490197,6.6274283507984215,0.4675843137254905,393,11,86,3,8,123,67,102,0.039,0.961,0.0,-0.5719,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,9,1,0,0,6,0,6,5,5,0,0,15,10,9,0,1,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,3,3,9,0,18,6,0,19,0,1,0,0,1,10,0,1,6,61,19,0,0.23507609907741955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18799027150155706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4185351344121996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20247069967499914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15526554638514306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257099199694599,0.0,0.0,0.19995560978657215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916183959370893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22060299449248205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23631640802704496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4704917364495982,0.0,0.0,0.18097306584889056,0.23249627286785704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767479709247215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3123482294652255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,quelquesfleurz,2020/01/09,"Constantly Angry or Tense I really don’t know if this is the right sub for posts like this, but I’m just looking for advice and insight into what’s going on with me. I’m a senior in HS and I’ve always been very academically driven and a little bit on the nervous side. I’ve had this cocktail of low self esteem, social anxiety, and depression, but I’ve recently just been unbelievably angry at the world and at people in general. I feel like my work is my only refuge and I have to work up the nerve to deal with people each day, because I’m tired of just about everyone. How do I unlearn this shit, please help",4.657299999999998,5.1194319600000044,6.174150000000001,78.62682500000003,69.4,9.13,26.825,9.188382445141503,2.07198,485,14,96,9,8,166,82,125,0.22,0.698,0.08199999999999999,-0.9655,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,5,6,1,1,6,0,8,2,1,1,0,22,16,11,0,1,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,10,1,0,3,1,0,2,1,4,0,0,4,2,7,2,17,12,2,20,0,2,1,0,4,13,1,2,6,58,12,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893161989495477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612035499696018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14820721377508514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809943158173453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21150911246596293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093593719678128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494344312848317,0.19973291024602674,0.16686419971466965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185122680713422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795854710788364,0.13840476073805433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010441358692194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12985689771687914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647202635823727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18929886923364805,0.19417398053892826,0.0,0.0,0.16268912147735026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473446638547228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268623761126541,0.0,0.0,0.21266352551595435,0.0,0.0,0.18554516391912373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241119946619464,0.0,0.19129054553810573,0.0,0.0,0.16544915506891006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20210849667318048,0.0,0.1988668228335493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197489059896072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22267058764544592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15985217047600578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28208366749316144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hypsster,2020/01/09,"I cant focus, I can’t stop overthinking. Some one will mention a word such as “dog” and I will think of millions of things related to a dog and I can’t control it I lose focus in class in because of this. 
I just think non stop about one thing that catches my mind and my brain will end up on a whole other topic in seconds",0.4587142857142865,2.323933728571429,2.47,95.165,83.14285714285714,5.142857142857143,21.42857142857143,6.1826913282559595,0.12271428571428578,251,8,58,2,7,84,46,70,0.044000000000000004,0.895,0.061,0.0196,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,3,0,6,1,1,1,0,12,8,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,3,2,0,0,1,3,1,0,4,0,0,8,0,11,5,2,9,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,1,3,45,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15626330240655645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286161714106994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287508611459492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270423422861172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867803913837588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25883168005125856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.347407054116088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42862567913137856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34060359356193715,0.32850636184193777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861959531290553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,l_davies1,2020/01/09,"Deep Okay so basically 19 year old M, I suffer with mental health but I couldn’t tell you how to explain it, I just feel so detached from reality and shit all the time, I’m creating a huge of web lies about bad shit I’ve never been through to people who I know, and it’s getting me to quite a lot. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, any suggestions would be great!",1.2046292947558754,2.7896589746835474,3.150669077757687,92.57493670886076,79.50632911392404,6.53960216998192,21.4122965641953,7.447530270364453,0.4904524412296562,285,8,68,4,7,96,61,79,0.28800000000000003,0.5770000000000001,0.135,-0.9484,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,5,7,2,0,3,1,5,3,2,1,2,16,11,6,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,1,8,2,9,7,2,6,0,1,0,0,5,2,2,1,4,39,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16154087205504475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983427634353828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011147040195146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241090917838884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261897648348569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525025504726145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611004760713524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019549225523013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23939263983746614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832117597187935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492667991168154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16468596098244273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25266167316407057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4876794768790448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076275331276106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385162230130826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16874737364683925,0.25972158565968545,0.0,0.15297320529880465
mentalhealth,sund0r666,2020/01/09,"Today was good but... i actually had a good day, had some fun, i even smiled (i didn't do that in along time)

But I deep down I'm scared I'll stop feeling this way and go back to my bad usual state of mind. is this normal? I know probably it is, I'm not dumb, but I need someone to tell

I'm really scared to just stop feeling well.",-0.1684749034749018,1.3442181756756746,2.4058301158301165,96.64283783783787,83.45945945945945,5.850193050193052,17.328185328185327,6.868970318607317,-0.3189436293436292,251,5,65,3,7,87,52,74,0.159,0.639,0.20199999999999999,0.0903,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,1,2,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,16,15,4,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,2,4,1,0,4,2,7,4,7,11,1,13,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,1,7,36,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.19988889009042876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750505989010247,0.1710282223142013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210128437746085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529123227724185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071409201584811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164121468583392,0.34361086183412826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257166506713316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20682441788424255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15188216033211915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20069428520227106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22084619779433792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122220335029372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4101500662059537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17355557746176925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425015692013797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903435083411495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944062376302884,0.0,0.19415912213254596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22559622437656426,0.0,0.0,0.16258806403893314,0.0,0.0,0.18417078364433756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CharmingSession3,2020/01/09,This has been happening to me for a week? What do I do? And why do I feel so sad? I have anxiety and lately I’ve been feeling very very tired throughout the day and I’ve taken three naps but I’m still tired. This has never happened to me before. What should I do???,-1.0106578947368412,1.0902725614035091,1.265942982456142,98.67680921052632,95.31578947368422,4.253508771929825,15.896929824561406,5.985473137389443,-0.6207175438596497,204,5,48,2,8,68,37,57,0.20800000000000002,0.77,0.022000000000000002,-0.8917,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,10,2,0,0,1,8,16,5,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,2,6,0,3,12,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18108907753882705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20143008952045816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15266391077966218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393840688447311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4186589442396944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670288863255137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18257197399598002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890437760527767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5441464053556211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3906352647315676,0.0,0.0,0.1898813785687116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21360171310875786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Winter-End,2020/01/09,"what wrong with me? ite so ive known for awhile I got a fucked up head was wondering if you guys may have any ideas what I may have

lets get started

1. I feel more when I kill a cockroach than when im directly responsible for someone dying
2. I have little to no empathy for people unless I am close to them and care about them
3. ive been responsible for 3 deaths never felt anything on either one of them
4. I feel more when I kill a cockroach than when im directly responsible for someone dieing
5. I am extremely good at manipulation faking friendships n such to get what I need or manipulating someone to kill themselves which is 2/3 of the deaths im responsible for
6. I feel smarter than everyone even though ik im probably dumber than most don't worry I don't go around being egotistical and stuff I usually keep my superiority complex to myself mostly cause im self aware enough to know that if anything im below average in most subjects
7. I have anxiety but I feel there isn't really ever a cause for it I get it randomly and I feel its triggered randomly
8. the only real cause ik for my anxiety is health paranoia I constantly get but there are times when I have anxiety without it being about non existent health problems
9. I get paranoid about people I feel its just based on my source of income is not whats considered legal and ive had to dealt with people online focused on bringing my group down and feds trying to gather information on us to track us down along with bad exes which makes it so I feel I cant be legitimate in a relationship and ususally just use them for sex instead of building a real relationship if that makes sense
10. I also go through phases where I don't wanna talk or see anyone and just want to be alone for a week

I don't really want solutions to my problems I would just like a diagnoses",4.695432432432433,5.576436056756755,6.287405405405406,76.34543243243245,69.51351351351353,9.487567567567568,29.93513513513513,9.692545771848811,2.778451891891892,1471,56,284,33,25,505,192,370,0.145,0.779,0.077,-0.9736,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,2,1,4,0,24,13,4,0,10,0,31,7,1,9,2,70,62,24,7,10,15,0,8,1,0,3,3,0,0,2,15,13,1,1,14,0,0,3,10,9,0,1,6,9,44,4,52,48,7,30,0,0,1,2,15,15,1,13,13,194,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897695441776192,0.0,0.0609809196886361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05185586500952796,0.0,0.17500409300525915,0.0,0.0,0.053319114901795334,0.0,0.1255023725497851,0.06788292078787563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366955579401151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774682990742894,0.23500399195643376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240432673086039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739699613411903,0.15828084427627198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787915715047155,0.0,0.05036556274374118,0.0689768138083617,0.0,0.0728647097257575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698969543259624,0.0,0.07321654675344258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049631497850756,0.1991998751810456,0.0,0.08667469706702605,0.06395889123721486,0.06098791324541531,0.0,0.0,0.07550422055421932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825940336456222,0.16211052974144838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08608236439429312,0.4942094840633644,0.0,0.0,0.06777875179574737,0.25309384659492296,0.0,0.04190763262831077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797567855093337,0.0,0.0372542335303484,0.07642732199933018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018013150097972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05654195284574325,0.05881238697843921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05167221213990481,0.057995196050741285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585963883881964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221554970342652,0.14593105127084766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17358926694020818,0.09770152884213083,0.0,0.0,0.16373819145172758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607651865942388,0.0,0.0795503656626381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193831281873409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0539735254755351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729347883524191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06129070335533807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491993378125666,0.0,0.04446477520406434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05177198984693095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183450221688622,0.06585964621710501,0.08398386652510575,0.0,0.08995408939168514,0.0,0.0611669845703069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07350688636733525,0.08269505565505952,0.0,0.07744043016950096,0.0,0.05416920756476505,0.08337263080664797,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sharkguy1995,2020/01/09,"why can't I do anything? ever since high school, my motivation has plummeted. I ended up being unenrolled from school for absences, since I couldn't find a good enough reason to go; I lost every job because I can't stick with them long enough and end up leaving and never coming back; my house is a mess because I can't find it in myself to clean it, my hygiene has gone downhill, as I don't even have the motivation to do that. my fiancée recently even left me for what I assume to be the same reason. I was told it would get better and it's not. it's getting so much worse. I don't have medical coverage to help, and I'm stuck hating myself and wondering why. the more I wonder, the more it happens in a vicious cycle. how can I get better, finally?",3.5842207792207788,4.5743398896103935,5.271298701298704,82.20551948051948,72.18181818181819,7.937662337662338,26.98701298701299,8.296473431620573,1.7754753246753248,589,20,118,9,11,201,92,154,0.124,0.7709999999999999,0.105,-0.4107,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,5,6,7,2,0,7,0,18,1,0,5,2,23,32,8,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,8,7,0,0,9,0,0,3,8,4,0,0,5,0,20,3,14,23,6,17,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,3,8,86,28,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636936740014853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099392401607497,0.0,0.15759050515913786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286386441992537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134541758468372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289706979332459,0.2671187626861961,0.0,0.1707490604029513,0.11692241191954784,0.10890651171811036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14159721452957466,0.2362812660862115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025979042025622,0.0,0.07346102316083153,0.108416544839719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430354750322501,0.0,0.0,0.12761677064769875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663976547354743,0.13656951788437333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14914784541331122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282698826054803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13686690567279355,0.1404405774307924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439038832696907,0.0,0.0,0.14110176478792047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021511795593732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502043781457066,0.0,0.09969271928636578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658001198042679,0.127627937322687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616345685381377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138492113510548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351277385213935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23327277629705764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803523336950276,0.0,0.0,0.1317262412796982,0.09182207832677763,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,antideppresantssucks,2020/01/09,"Fuck my life right? I don’t know what’s wrong with my brain but I started taking medication for ADD and Antidepressants and now I’m officially fucked in the head!  I now feel angry and suicidal and have thoughts about killing people and then myself. I stopped taking them but the effects are still there (after 2 months). There’s a thick fog in my brain and I feel like I’ve no emotion. Fuck society and fuck everyone in it Becasue I’m done. I also have ibs, acid reflux, asthma,  low iron deficiency and so much jolly good stuff. Bullet to my head would surely end it all right? Life after death can fuck off tbh",1.3562499999999993,4.018623125000005,2.6750000000000007,89.2425,88.58333333333334,5.666666666666668,19.166666666666664,7.1686216300943375,0.5661666666666672,485,14,96,8,16,156,82,120,0.344,0.555,0.10099999999999999,-0.9918,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,1,8,11,6,0,3,0,7,13,4,1,2,21,21,13,3,1,2,0,3,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,10,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,2,4,12,3,10,18,2,18,0,1,0,5,1,8,5,0,11,57,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627221632926488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29669874541131896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13599277649505778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14948354824068458,0.11770124162443266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698224681232226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343865198828434,0.09493675988436452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6142740773724392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146196483172856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27276729464307525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14702327741351806,0.0,0.0730329588871901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18772850606076785,0.06492342170523087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387285971547375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607166124868134,0.0,0.09768956125322853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212930745052572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269749483195257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406034222960476,0.0,0.10612625682172017,0.11110212773065578,0.0,0.0,0.15212744435931644,0.1453602707299706,0.0,0.1252474071038567,0.0,0.19983373024401474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549994642961176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440135986962378,0.14529453314681867,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alcoholicgrapejuice,2020/01/09,"I hate New Years. I feel like New Year is a great time to do a refresh and start anew and all that shit, and every single  time I convince myself that this year will be **different** and life will get better!!

And every year my hopes are up so high as soon as something bad happens I just feel like the whole year is ruined. Rinse and repeat. I feel actually like this year is even worse because my anxiety is rapidly growing and I’ve started having suicidal thoughts which I’ve never had before.

I think at this point I genuinely might not make it to the end of the year. I’m scared for myself, and I feel like even though I’m aware of it and actively trying to rid of it, it’s still getting worse.

tl;dr fuck New Years for bringing my hopes up each shitty year.",1.6719805194805204,3.957341571428575,2.7988149350649363,92.139650974026,81.33766233766234,5.4084415584415595,20.663961038961038,6.6274283507984215,0.28696233766233803,598,17,124,6,16,191,90,154,0.20199999999999999,0.6409999999999999,0.157,-0.9059,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,7,15,3,1,5,0,12,3,1,1,2,24,31,13,1,2,2,0,4,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,10,10,0,0,6,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,2,4,13,9,13,25,4,28,0,1,0,1,0,5,2,3,25,75,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.10048351968307268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787714963596512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859753522844383,0.06276933968298759,0.0,0.08761958357197426,0.0,0.0,0.09106828300288956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758136274589372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120054219960266,0.0,0.0,0.13602095839671016,0.0,0.17351273341805018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20825818501967025,0.220684604256466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519377729979353,0.10759477888688117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352439680296067,0.0,0.0,0.09105571675089474,0.0,0.0,0.10166120627562238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879308305750436,0.0,0.2045441817838145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273050522990163,0.20122306882245855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873303741353888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923452087486646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941653787437931,0.29834617350408943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733959697748933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309057755029508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569686057698327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927106313623382,0.0,0.0,0.14576488900928347,0.0,0.08223169127339115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126320786585692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597879059547461,0.10116715311803964,0.08174639607550538,0.1200848557758385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990962965026534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496193105605533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098697297961956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5967816767832937
mentalhealth,RoseGold_327,2020/01/09,"Day: whatever... Thunder Rolls; 

Thoughts rolling through my mind like a thunderstorm, I’m looking for the flash of lightning, some explanation, some shred proof of the impending storm and some relief of blue skies. There’s no crack, no flash, just an empty growing feeling of a heavy storm",4.496866666666668,7.813634020000002,3.2360000000000007,86.70466666666668,78.8,6.533333333333335,32.333333333333336,7.793537801064563,2.6285333333333334,231,12,39,4,6,66,40,50,0.115,0.722,0.163,0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,4,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,2,6,3,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,2,20,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3569009912244374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27981862582222444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703661447751169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4647215353028996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5587821503792882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4393424289874936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pflueger92,2020/01/09,"What kind of help do I need? I'll make it short and simple.

I have been attempting to reach out and get some professional help on my mental health for about a year now. It's steadily declining and I'm worried what it will result in. From what I can see I just have a bad attitude, depression, anxiety but it doesn't seem to fit ""all"" the criteria when I read other posts (idk what is really the culprit). I used to be so fun but now everything in my life is weighing me down and it's taking a toll on me. 

Unfortunately I live in a small town so when I search for local help I don't see a lot of promising results. Idk if I need a counselor, a therapist, a doctor, a mental health professional, etc... Like where do I go and what do I do?

Like I said when I look for local help it just doesn't seem to fit my symptoms, it's all medication or some type of marriage counseling. I just need a direction and some motivation.",1.8579195046439665,3.647774178947369,4.0467182662538725,85.95614551083591,78.26315789473685,7.839009287925697,23.808049535603715,8.671277953709913,1.576653250773994,714,24,156,16,17,246,101,190,0.094,0.745,0.161,0.9379,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,12,7,0,0,12,0,15,7,0,5,2,30,30,15,0,4,7,0,0,2,0,1,6,1,0,0,13,7,1,0,3,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,4,20,5,19,26,7,23,0,1,3,0,6,15,0,8,8,107,33,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168416944258963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218979739648564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12574347145555856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494299201250142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16282067577147688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13120900548107547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627526498592474,0.0,0.08297112988089905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3103672530366669,0.0,0.0,0.3914238557891041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15202914009604954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311910329409736,0.14264951380076116,0.0,0.128914406040379,0.0,0.12259726734433038,0.0,0.0,0.124117943427642,0.0,0.0,0.0974513948770126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707248823263425,0.294253012036838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247556580201937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398208427144732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603240846176455,0.0,0.09352679055635016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388726806125556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326748802017195,0.2658129073920019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15174252352042036,0.10976849229283776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950901012551364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260909918373015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14826287733449178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401464149161808
mentalhealth,gnashsplash,2020/01/09,"What can I do to steer my life in a direction that will make me feel a bit better ? Hello

Excuse my poor english.
 I’m a Norwegian 18 year old guy who’d like some advice. 
Half a year ago I quit organized skiing training. Skiing is something I had done practically all my life and something I heavily identified myself with. Whenever we had those Introduction/get-to-know-eachother games in class I would always introduce myself only by my name and the fact that I liked skiing. However in the past few years I have not enjoyed skiing training much and while in school I'd often dread the fact that I had to go skiing afterwards. I am relieved that I stopped skiing. Nowadays, the time that skiing training used to fill up is now filled with just momentary satisfactions I get from the Internet, watching TV-shows and reading. Reading has always been important for me, but especially when I was younger. I think I used books as a way to escape reality, not because reality was horrible or anything, but imagining myself as a person in the fantasy books was always much more desirable. There were times when I would literally spend a bigger part of the day reading than not reading. I didn't sleep enough because I'd be reading instead. Everyone around me stopped reading after becoming teens though and I am also reading less and less. I've also been lucid-dreaming a lot lately which is even more so an escape from reality. 

I think I am lacking an identity. If someone asked me today to introduce myself I wouldn't know what to say besides my name. My grades have plummeted the last half a year which I think has hit my self-esteem a bit. During school I often find myself too tired to work even though I haven't been doing anything special and when I have the strength to work I can't help but let my mind drift to think about other things (these things can be pretty random chains of thoughts sometimes involving things I've been reading or watching online. Often daydreaming too). I also have similar problems when working with school at home. My mind starts drifting as soon as I begin. I think this hurts my self-esteem a bit too. It doesn't conform with who I want to be.
Its hard to put my finger on it, but I feel like I'm always feeling quite distant from everything that goes on around me. I think I have felt like that for years.
Lately I think I have been feeling less and less. The momentary happiness I get from reading and the Internet is slowly disappearing and I also feel like I'm drifting away from my friends a little. I have a few friends but I feel like being with them is not as fun anymore and just takes my energy. Our interests are starting to differ and sometimes when I talk to them I feel like some of their comments are so bafflingly ignorant and stupid, but I'm not articulate enough in a conversation to tell them that in a nice way. So I just pretend like I agree and try to change topic.
I've been feeling sick an awful lot the past few months which my teacher told me could be related to the fact that I've been feeling a bit depressed, but I don't know about that. I never got sick before thought . It's hard for me to tell if I'm feeling particularly sad or not, but I am pretty sure I am a little bit depressed. 

I feel like a good way to get better and start feeling better about myself would be to find  something I can identity myself with quick. I have small interests, like drawing or programming and I have a book in my head that I really want to write (reading is not something I feel like I can identify myself with because I never tell people that I read, and I also have doubts about whether or not the way I read is good for me) I have also gained a great interest in 3-D animation programs recently and I want to learn how to use them so very much, but even so, when I begin using them, I just can't get forward because my mind is just not able to focus enough. I end up staring into a wall thinking about other things for a couple hours or just do something else. My mind rarely feels like it's completely in the present.
My grades are dropping, I'm starting to believe less in myself, I'm always tired but never working, I'm lacking an identity and I can't find one. I feel stuck. What do I do? How can I make my life a bit better?",5.564421159029648,6.138776251190477,6.155893980233607,79.15677897574126,67.44047619047619,8.958670260557055,31.444294699011678,8.948635820820359,2.5693075022461818,3401,131,641,55,53,1108,319,840,0.094,0.738,0.168,0.9953,2,0,5,0,0,0,72.0,2,0,6,12,48,41,1,2,42,1,75,10,3,8,8,144,137,65,0,14,34,0,19,12,2,5,7,1,1,2,34,30,0,3,33,25,2,9,20,9,0,3,22,23,110,32,77,100,30,83,0,4,3,0,31,26,0,17,57,456,144,28,0.03896859883080713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03807966377185041,0.03454331163280068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869790464361769,0.16212497968298628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038646378865292055,0.0,0.0,0.06413567299589731,0.0693806295642822,0.03643037953263861,0.0,0.03661228136937462,0.0,0.0,0.09501958461520962,0.04303775580130679,0.0331594074320935,0.04390426643539023,0.0,0.13785823566501884,0.2552617028677864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04122361051118386,0.0,0.04085783446548261,0.0,0.0,0.031113255262653287,0.0431180134116925,0.0,0.025131522454123936,0.0,0.0671271941434539,0.0,0.0,0.040713891734723694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03987840621244893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032553263981753136,0.0,0.03451461207117354,0.1207949386659132,0.0,0.07721517601841855,0.0,0.0,0.03723616614545159,0.03502246391937158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295555416663627,0.19487422353715975,0.03741596596992509,0.0,0.10684978006699627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021408558178532,0.0,0.10179742259746606,0.0,0.022146752747260155,0.0653700236932644,0.031166748334247388,0.042963017782203836,0.0,0.03858503947687968,0.0,0.04148279807354505,0.06981642067907981,0.0,0.03999302484144299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02611983037348078,0.0,0.039088681932637724,0.0,0.038376220221876166,0.0,0.04171669101611032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424836840152959,0.031764609116709884,0.08791655366768414,0.0,0.0,0.03984803250784783,0.08257402137774075,0.22845706810529695,0.07811354689341418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625941839134142,0.0,0.0,0.0520236846313856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15738870448123538,0.0,0.03110436380463132,0.0,0.08593921177527547,0.0,0.09016495726870156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04089098924903459,0.0,0.02640613108301947,0.02963737540314465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04219919507152997,0.074399873945745,0.027015919825103214,0.034025877410134395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929014895019125,0.0,0.03728768625685488,0.0,0.039174205024179835,0.0,0.08289580319241269,0.4677497314449575,0.0,0.02496428225901639,0.0,0.038476790138630174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030989393875287725,0.0,0.11831490735293156,0.0,0.0,0.08130549463228852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03899674148684084,0.0,0.03301796733145994,0.1499996560672057,0.07708188133632053,0.0,0.11032869929089094,0.0,0.0,0.06515898704180796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036727443223611766,0.0,0.029299536618804783,0.031321483635914256,0.10218081896593777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355602204828687,0.19975603718179827,0.07657290099376986,0.06187342927386375,0.04544580671082837,0.08957734368709377,0.03693767521294149,0.03723616614545159,0.0,0.026457120640109875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462543050268294,0.0,0.0321531751572353,0.06895406769597415,0.12372583965168953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347841625039873,0.0,0.0,0.0830465236370531,0.0,0.0,0.12547250005670346
mentalhealth,SirThinkal0t,2020/01/09,"I am growing more resentful towards Women because I believe that I have been left behind. They say women are more in touch with emotions  and are better at understanding people. I am always on my tip toes being extra kind to people. But I've noticed Women being extra rude to me and I cant do anything. I am not an Incel. I have had many relationships. I feel a sickness, a cancer  in society. Its absolutely incredible how polarized men and women are now? I had no idea, women felt the exact same way about men. Well let me tell you, I give up. Seriously. I'm Bisexual thankfully, and honestly you girls are just not worth it. Guess I will continue to live in my ignorance. I am a good person, whatever portrayal you see in me, ITS WRONG. You guys were supposed to be the healers, you have no idea what excitement/motivation you bring to me just from showing interest. 


- Signed one of the good ones that can't handle it anymore.",2.8042759051186015,5.288186668539328,4.972284644194758,77.02699126092386,78.38202247191009,8.000499375780276,26.742821473158553,8.841846274778883,2.5512873907615483,729,30,129,18,18,252,115,178,0.131,0.738,0.13,-0.0495,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,6,1,1,6,13,2,0,7,0,23,4,1,1,1,21,32,6,0,0,5,0,3,0,0,1,3,1,0,10,7,5,0,1,5,1,1,2,6,5,1,2,5,5,25,8,18,22,5,14,0,0,1,0,21,9,0,1,2,101,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692262337926606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16319396272837644,0.0,0.0,0.13541442867046616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031096706505846,0.0,0.0,0.1853967028902809,0.0,0.145535186177053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851017954624192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320375857083846,0.0,0.15799823774501032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785578282081178,0.0,0.27604121067426834,0.0,0.0,0.18127546246489148,0.16293494187932764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3715242654375156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713583110582335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787890726415523,0.16826824460195666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14530474142127112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683255357431293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873465218958832,0.0,0.0,0.22301293411130235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22816290387145344,0.14368274422876684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17667007560494968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086043602394476,0.0,0.0,0.1311287246374404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14382798812799985,0.15149978254624324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17130715942675867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061579543477306,0.0,0.0,0.1479543627248696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17991464126237786,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sliscus,2020/01/09,"Seeking advice on online counselor degrees I want a career change. I want to become a counselor, I think I want to focus on Marriage/Family/Relationship Counseling. I have a full time job now and a family with 2 kids, so I am looking for a good online program that is not a pay-to-pass type of scam university. Does anyone have any experience with this that they can share with me?",7.041891891891893,6.5960322432432426,8.049324324324324,70.30344594594597,64.4054054054054,10.643243243243244,33.364864864864856,10.125756701596842,3.3288756756756754,302,11,54,6,4,103,52,74,0.057999999999999996,0.8009999999999999,0.141,0.3182,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,6,0,5,0,0,0,0,9,10,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,8,2,9,10,1,5,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,2,36,11,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585533988781911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17992965599527952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18500684542606852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922178648736723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27990017652352245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315436978151523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588189030574782,0.24943104851167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22192477738124847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625638474646476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22218819917087887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840696655603503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16953800678635347,0.0,0.0,0.1542840275618721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4681845059370035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ttaatter99,2020/01/09,"In need of advice Hi there! I will try to keep this as short and to the point as possible. Anyways, when i was younger i went through a few traumatic events in which caused me to develop PTSD.  While trying to deal with all my pain, i developed unhealthy coping mechanisms such as binge drinking to the point of blacking out. Because of this, i found myself around people and in situations that were not very safe. About a year ago i finally recognized how unhealthy my thoughts and actions were, and i was able to hold myself accountable for the way i had been living. For the past year i have been working hard on bettering myself. I have quit binge drinking, and am in the process of finishing up my last year of university. Although i do feel a lot better about myself , i still struggle with feelings  of shame and guilt with regards to  my past. Does any one have any advice that they can give that may help me forgive myself, and move on? 
Thanks in advance",5.84734432234432,6.833917159340657,5.5612637362637365,82.2045695970696,66.96703296703296,8.704029304029303,32.1996336996337,8.841846274778883,2.5765809523809518,761,31,143,12,12,235,112,182,0.135,0.81,0.055999999999999994,-0.9327,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,5,9,9,0,3,8,0,15,3,0,2,1,27,24,14,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,12,2,3,5,2,1,4,1,4,0,1,10,4,24,5,34,12,3,31,0,0,1,0,6,13,0,2,13,107,30,1,0.13544153989623792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647038104902566,0.12006075304312523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18420978323549295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205716857816286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256390559782356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23957407099645886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13913577056268087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13963428041496184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185258042876286,0.0,0.0,0.26536229193109123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369666242689374,0.0,0.0,0.1483695866261608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485046576414259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299278666353115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12132901631739608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078360920731854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038666382262475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040293215695676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959736113241905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151475537844802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14395292228455325,0.0,0.10042818565953993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177869268829424,0.0,0.14411934778818578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258588550721288,0.093898110083767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25607206755300066,0.15268998576768664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832391217937936,0.0,0.0,0.14405874950833206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15224196562143835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816378871810507,0.0,0.0,0.14159290501065094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246963727916836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752545371079614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839118299467377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175345499994237,0.0,0.1075071900848786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12555566441453542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860305414541597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616597332035825
mentalhealth,ohdeerohdeer1,2020/01/09,"No longer depressed I’ve always struggled with bad anxiety but it turned into depression when I started university due to loneliness and has only just gone away in my third year. This is the first time I’ve been truly ‘happy’ ever and I have no worries right now. I feel sad that I’d wasted two years of my life being unhappy but I know how to prevent myself from getting like that. My mind just feels carefree and happy, I find it odd as I’m so used to continually worrying, I have so much energy now and instead of being addicted to being depressed, I’m addicted to being happy but it feels odd and I’m not sure if I can make it last",1.9699105545617213,4.235553480620158,4.287751937984496,81.99563506261185,80.08527131782945,7.070005963029219,23.87656529516995,8.139509932561175,1.6604175313059033,505,18,96,10,13,175,83,129,0.309,0.5429999999999999,0.147,-0.976,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,10,11,0,1,1,0,10,3,0,3,2,26,23,14,0,1,7,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,6,0,3,2,3,11,5,13,17,1,17,0,4,0,0,0,4,0,1,13,68,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3216615174305017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275775725598627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112860946149255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13861039667415342,0.0,0.12318236992775322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3812051582080634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345039538941675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22378858683855785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484082249352408,0.1254899432948949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770789505537017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4711490418844203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107927628580221,0.12025759950456193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10420563291932856,0.07207628071031574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984782058574378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489644317714077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845238982202292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11220410767538162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599081856440006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442332600752516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542316180448056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390463878142984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602661538368407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047155529911544,0.1441165222421127,0.0,0.0,0.12741956815080266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29965014197259515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19001048122726666
mentalhealth,AsleepOrdinary,2020/01/09,"Does it actually get better ? For everyone ? Everyone keeps telling me that it gets better and how they overcame their depressive episode etc. but most of those people experienced depression for the first time in college. I feel like for some people who’ve possible had shitty childhoods or some trauma this might not be the case. Like I’ve been depressed since I was 13, I’ve had an eating disorder and anxiety for about the same time. I’m almost 23 now. And I don’t really think that I can ever fully heal and be happy. I’m just looking for hope I guess ? Are there actually people who are happy and functional that also have a history like mine ?",3.5306097560975616,6.074931430894308,4.812378048780489,78.81661585365855,76.15447154471545,8.327642276422765,25.697154471544714,9.075114841892004,2.468149593495935,518,19,91,13,12,171,85,123,0.17,0.64,0.19,0.4696,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,3,7,12,0,0,5,0,12,2,0,1,1,22,22,9,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,5,1,1,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,4,3,9,8,8,15,5,7,0,3,1,0,4,1,0,8,9,62,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.2817304923066074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454615482929692,0.0,0.0,0.11543702709727185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104277224719426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25533253895607344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729865719874692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16543815658327354,0.0,0.12632207823950278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14770657868054798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160988943075135,0.0,0.1305732738262251,0.0,0.2758661402285992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298794018353359,0.1031240121062636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278444496524313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508343364216771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901832847929911,0.0,0.0,0.3073275413405871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337259785027692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283053395654674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21156706003233647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121804801599426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531330482850153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002233432584551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16273347769678467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247461410864624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940820913990753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261686824552143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249395928250397,0.0,0.0,0.16834385202170693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Merry-goes-forever,2020/01/09,"Why does it feel like my mental cognition is declining So about me, I try my hardest and very desperately too to become a great writer because I love books and since I was little it was the only thing I was really passionate about.

I didn't start writing until I was 14 and before that all I did was make comics surrounded in a very chaoitic home life with parents constantly fighting and verbally abusing me. I was never really good at school, daydreamed too much and instead of socialising I read in the hallways. But somehow I feel like it never really helped me, It's like there's a blockage in my brain that prevents me to absorb information and it's veryyyy strenuous for me to think logically.

My mind feels cloudy and foggy all day, and despite me attempting to study the books i like in detail and writing 2k words a day and looking up dictionaries and all that I don't feel any smarter. I still feel like the 14 year old who can barely put together two sentences that make sense and I'm 18 now. I see those kids on wattpad writing great stories with good grammar and storylines and they're only 16 and I wonder how that's possible. Do you think that could correlate to me having BPD?

It's really frustrating because writing is the only thing I want out of life, forget love, forget family, forget money, forget happiness even, I just want to write stories and write more but no matter how hard I try it's like i'm not improving at all. I wrote 2 books so far and I'm not happy with them, they read to me like a child wrote them. I mainly read classics and other books that are harder to read in hopes that it will make something in my brain click and make me a better writer but everything I type or say sounds disorganised and random. I just want to be wonderful and good like all those writers I read but I'm not even close to it and it breaks my heart.

Does anyone have tips to become smarter without having to take any courses? Something I can do independently? I'm not the best when it comes to reaching out for help so any such advice can just as well be left unsaid because I will not take it.",4.569775641025643,5.8675870673076975,5.333865384615387,81.51946794871796,70.15384615384615,8.335128205128205,28.04935897435897,8.745826893841286,2.100814358974359,1684,59,322,29,30,547,197,416,0.098,0.757,0.145,0.9556,1,0,2,0,2,0,25.0,0,1,3,3,22,24,2,0,12,0,25,8,3,7,7,91,57,35,0,5,14,1,6,8,0,2,2,2,1,2,26,29,0,1,11,10,1,2,11,2,1,1,10,11,44,22,37,42,9,32,0,0,3,3,23,17,0,6,20,209,70,11,0.0,0.09002488674041857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424761052571527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15500875732046274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053127579306189485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895166892283412,0.16782976602847208,0.06465410994782925,0.0,0.07973721794624494,0.06719889027082925,0.0,0.0,0.09569522496032322,0.1696395214342933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06545077735776081,0.0,0.08210830978027966,0.0,0.06066452878284929,0.0,0.0,0.09800272934507527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298271358762973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036927409231523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828669171860334,0.0,0.07162798641699616,0.0,0.19209101211854995,0.16284221044796784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19118740471215132,0.0,0.1675383181119639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161766062501754,0.06806392044238263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003767705504864,0.1018567287876928,0.0,0.07621499101164518,0.07546613142355485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255341948335891,0.0,0.10733504748587508,0.2969632560510857,0.07615277594456797,0.0,0.0,0.06380478054833638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13715137328056684,0.0,0.20287123845243235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657082929086056,0.0,0.07671900217845475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055854669682373216,0.0,0.11720223635138127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972912423711769,0.0,0.0,0.17336058840654267,0.0,0.0,0.08436774591905198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08565699582079495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638174367075001,0.0,0.0,0.380007074247353,0.0,0.1947011210316055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060423024233245276,0.0,0.07689668001585996,0.06054690284688359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285214705681766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698754599721033,0.0,0.0,0.05377963907348316,0.0,0.06067840763496095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425629157288328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009566055874338,0.09737092571047244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317202382290287,0.0,0.07422225327459779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538432274731734,0.13444642770819593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831591209663514,0.0,0.0685609020839743,0.0,0.0,0.07324283124775141,0.16479598866694606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048929178428222295
mentalhealth,Dan_unicorn,2020/01/09,"Numbing sadness (sorry that sounds very sad but yeah) Just, sometimes I get thinking about the future and bit philosophical in terms of like what after death? And like what's the point of doing anything when you're just ultimately going to die?

Just thoughts currently running through my head, I think did have a panic attack as I was literally shaking just thinking all this. Just wondering if anyone has similar thoughts and kinda doesn't want yo reach out to people irl coz uk sad shite.",5.936918138041732,8.100205966292139,5.5438523274478335,77.96146067415731,67.98876404494382,7.782343499197433,31.815409309791328,8.418075326091056,2.6445364365971096,397,17,65,6,7,122,73,89,0.302,0.629,0.069,-0.9788,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,7,9,1,2,3,1,6,2,1,1,1,21,15,7,2,2,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,6,0,0,3,1,7,0,0,4,1,4,2,10,11,3,11,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,3,7,39,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153549933576317,0.0,0.18071268628692874,0.0,0.0,0.24982752839222025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23974711668062545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279108830837568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473231563875895,0.0,0.12480415327506793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253736996663106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21457164450526106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25765413631772605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15224349308438692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075936672784517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171907331701006,0.245825033758206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42213383435763857,0.0,0.34867689357775883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18119359738190705,0.12952619784153854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381476197853516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helppleasethrowaway7,2020/01/09,"Close friend wants to commit suicide and I don't know what to do. Her family does not know just how deep her depression/anxiety goes, and she refuses to tell them due to fear of rejection (they've played it off as it ""all being in her head"" before, are not mental health advocates). Ever since I've known her she's been down, but these last sixth months have been the worst I've ever witnessed-- she talks about suicide at least once a week. I'm the only person she talks to about this stuff and until now I've been able to help, but now I'm getting really freaked out. She's a student and says she doesn't have time to see a therapist, and is also too scared to go alone (I've offered to go with her) and believes that she is too far gone to be helped (even though shes never even tried therapy of any kind). I don't know what to do anymore, and I feel like if she kills herself it will be my fault for not doing enough. I don't think she's a risk to herself at this exact moment (I would have called 911 if I thought that), but I feel like she could get to that point soon. I feel like if I don't answer her texts immediately and talk her down, she will do something drastic-- which is becoming something of a problem because I have my own life/mental health to take care of too (I know that sounds selfish and I feel horrible about it, but her issues take up hours of my day/night). I love her and I don't want anything bad to happen to her, but I know we can't keep this up for much longer. What can I do??

(Btw we are US residents, so we don't have great health insurance/resources)",4.095665371888934,4.349293764350456,4.710012947777301,89.36778449144009,70.57099697885197,7.996604805064019,25.429578477916852,7.793537801064563,1.0566744641058845,1240,32,281,14,21,397,171,331,0.157,0.7440000000000001,0.098,-0.9741,0,1,2,0,0,3,44.0,4,0,1,0,18,20,1,3,7,0,35,5,1,1,6,55,62,24,3,8,12,0,4,3,1,3,3,2,0,1,17,16,0,2,13,1,0,3,12,11,0,0,5,7,48,9,38,50,6,30,0,1,1,1,42,13,0,3,17,187,65,1,0.09832619163906564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183628091021046,0.0,0.07863141992948622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686518206334617,0.0,0.0752192674732637,0.0,0.09751316107010097,0.0,0.0,0.08091407778446458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209826293085128,0.05993873379245904,0.10859355356880693,0.08366834701863342,0.11077994705537028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040203519076088,0.0,0.10025010547318157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785054631487619,0.0,0.0,0.06341225928431694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604591291185898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159724021095676,0.0,0.12988704448240754,0.17788333923648567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269318267035256,0.11064430190242044,0.19886670745682386,0.21073275286035167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596657175167792,0.0,0.10274275373502398,0.0,0.11176208127291308,0.0,0.0,0.10840497340401972,0.0,0.0,0.08694952653919115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091103972865598,0.3135484313169529,0.0,0.0,0.1318119472569994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683149246146573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262699812460052,0.0,0.08739683694440901,0.1087833628113405,0.10239159775005864,0.2701875173638468,0.08014896960781838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694506970056218,0.14411163176119796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874322686508403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908967460509233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848302807971529,0.0,0.07228106441132519,0.0,0.07583522060948655,0.0,0.0,0.09227247005437096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471418507586014,0.0,0.0747814994893973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08585463792122018,0.0,0.0,0.09295003293272316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408488615634757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06299027615001704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781929341157406,0.0984416709735234,0.0,0.07835324440138898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133644179866341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15139261221368908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255996509148654,0.2151057893329096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14785811853408898,0.2370926049286163,0.08594142539487158,0.0,0.11244456935184337,0.11416428698351372,0.0,0.06300345336470688,0.09660498405603914,0.07806001301923245,0.0573347930630265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06675702982219445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11827430195713735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599067074500426,0.0,0.07887133998840776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984810542413465,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MercRazor,2020/01/09,"Seeking help or being a man and sucking it up? Pretty much sums it all up. But a little information...for my personal life, my wife and mother are disabled, my dad is fighting off (and beating) cancer, but with myself being the most able-bodied male available to my family, I feel I have this obligation to fix everything. Because I'm a complete idiot, myself and the wife have a decent amount of debt built up we can never seem to catch up with, though we aren't penniless.

So, there's that. I won't just lay everything out here, but I end up feeling very much overwhelmed, smothered even. There are days when I can be in a good mood, but most of my days unusually in some sort of funk or another, like feeling so worn down I can barely even work up the energy to warm up food in the microwave for myself. Or I become unreasonably angry and almost violent. This...isn't my norm, and when I get in these moods, I behave very bnb abnormally, seriously considering if even getting up out of bed or off the couch is worth it or becoming completely hateful towards people I love.

Enough rambling, I suppose I'm simply confused, and maybe a little scared about the situation. Should I seek psychological help, or am I just being immature and not handling things properly? Do I just need to man up and figure out how to fix it myself?

TL;DR, Feel like I'm losing my mind, going from depressed to full-on rage. Fund a psychologist of some kind or just work it out?",6.5805357142857135,6.5528849821428565,7.375714285714286,73.35178571428574,65.25,10.142857142857146,32.14285714285714,9.827888789773867,3.0297142857142854,1145,41,209,22,16,383,160,280,0.17300000000000001,0.6970000000000001,0.129,-0.958,1,0,0,0,2,0,44.0,2,0,0,4,17,21,7,3,13,0,18,4,0,1,2,53,34,27,0,3,17,4,5,2,0,2,2,0,2,4,9,17,1,0,6,0,3,2,4,13,0,0,1,5,27,6,38,27,9,31,0,3,0,1,14,23,1,16,8,152,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735673660168156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336386134313327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775303882089533,0.2809302043093413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141273121021904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26670070430755954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640467446824321,0.0,0.10954367865099464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264756770284505,0.13141541330832646,0.0,0.2520121550340855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286101531341197,0.0,0.11989806894552725,0.0,0.2572328785648069,0.09086051208097654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15379179890812988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289712809608048,0.0,0.07228178675022068,0.10667618332981037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556819664100596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704979534068663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13244290996176805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983405486796726,0.12427168041908257,0.25494422605822586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422867348397054,0.0,0.0,0.11478882509578135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777375607196925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284199189835354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18699023584216734,0.0943055705144624,0.09809239738235546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817360169882024,0.11105245283657904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293921890765676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733370366051242,0.0,0.0,0.115783839000052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14296051780568125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449561870104685,0.0,0.1249579602852198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20988078718179531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18518341667897215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myquarterlifecrisiss,2020/01/09,Can I take sertraline with grapefruit Fanta? So I just picked up my sertraline prescription and am supposed to start it tomorrow. However I just had a grapefruit Fanta and it says ‘do not take with any grapefruit products at the same time as the medication’. Would I still be able to start it tomorrow morning (9 hours from now) or should I leave it? If so how long for? Thanks:),4.255399061032865,6.3776737183098575,4.6475352112676065,82.81853286384978,72.38028169014085,8.67699530516432,30.143192488262912,9.2995712137729,2.8069136150234737,298,13,56,7,6,94,51,71,0.026000000000000002,0.9740000000000001,0.0,-0.1877,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,3,0,7,1,0,2,0,14,12,8,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,6,1,9,8,1,11,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,9,42,10,0,0.28195177642250746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19173687650569507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277665704915858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985462206087701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24951844962894265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28403675191436656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242193693268384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3991338370993597,0.0,0.22516705286297176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4239852930764055,0.0,0.0,0.2595833143140083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644083482280876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20029045237888446,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SimplyKurokii,2020/01/09,"I don't know what to do anymore with my life, ironically it's my 18th birthday (even if nobody reads this i'm fine because i just wanna rant somewhere) Hi, I'm a 12th Grade Senior High School in the Philippines   
I don't really know if i have such mental health issues since  
well I've never been diagnosed or I don't know if i'm just being overreacting to the things happening to me but well here I am approaching Reddit.  


So character background is your guy here is a gamer, a band bassist and a mediocre student  
the gaming part came to me as a stress reliever but the more stress i take, the more hours i put into gaming I then became a semi professional player for my game (League Of Legends Masters rank #\~1,200 out of 1.2 Million players). The band part came when an school event (namely battle of the bands) got announced, and as a person with musical background I took the initiative of forming a band (Now is well known on our area)  and we take local gigs. Last part is the school   
welp my school is notoriously known for it's academic skill just the name of the school would mean fear for the other schools here our city, and yes I am in this school   
but only as a mediocre student   
my grades go high as 94 but as low as 75  


Now this is where the problem starts  
As I write this rant, I am currently cutting classes and I'm aware of the dangers of it  
but I have the excuse of not going because I don't feel well (nosebleed yesterday, woke up with low blood pressure today and i'm very late so I just went to review my exams for today and will go home later)   
so now i am facing academic stress, I have all my requirements in the house just stacked upon one another but i'm just too embarrassed to pass them because i'm scared of being looked at the faculty by the other teachers and I am mostly known for that behavior and being late  
I am the worst student of the best school, I'm only known because my ex was famous because everyone was intimidated by her and I had the audacity to make a move but... we broke up due to me being useless and having a depressive episode that time when she needed me... so i don't blame her, plus she's having fun with her new boyfriend (5 months after)... all i'm known for the school for Is my big brain towards philosophy and social structures.. but due to the teacher in philosophy (not having a degree in philosophy) i kinda failed that class even though i was good at philosophizing, oh and also for being in a band. I game because it's the only thing that gives me thrill and i'm sorry for the word usage but ""The Fire Of Passion"", at Saturday i'll be going to the tryouts of an E-Sports team.  


(here comes the mindset)  
I know I've always been useless but it never hit me that much since it was just a fact and I believed it, most of my friends say i'm not   
but how can they say that?  
I'm not an honors student and I always f\*ck up things up.  
the worse part is that I know i'm wrong   
I know that I'm bad   
but I can't do anything to change..  
And it's been like that for 4 years now..  
I'm helpless and useless. just like an ant falling down the sink  


i just don't know anymore  
yes I've of suicide  
i did several times  
and I also thought of selling my organs to the black market to give my family the financial aid they can get.  
I mean it's logical right?  
but when they knew what was on my mind they all cried.  
I can never open up again.  
I'm a crazy person or a psychopath if I go to mental health departments. Welcome to The Philippines.  
And when me and my ex broke up I became an alcoholic... every Friday every week.. for a month or two..  


how i'm still here   
while most people do the iconic slashing in the wrist of self-harm..  
I just wake up at the midnight and listen to the inner voices in me on how useless i am and how many people I've Disappointed and it literally burns and aches my chest..  


so no one can see my pain..  
I just laugh and send/make/share memes and offer the helping hand because I don't want people to experience the same pain as me.  


But..  
How can I help.  
when I can't even help myself..  


Happy Birthday to me.",2.2185104311995083,4.066694699879957,3.773244378832615,88.05981205995914,77.39135654261705,6.3754518023425595,23.381606696732746,7.276361111833896,0.8790865124428153,3187,101,664,39,74,1057,344,833,0.16399999999999998,0.7440000000000001,0.092,-0.9965,1,0,1,0,1,1,92.0,4,1,5,10,50,46,3,7,61,2,56,15,7,6,7,123,111,77,1,9,36,2,3,2,1,2,7,4,1,3,30,40,1,1,18,11,1,16,17,28,4,4,18,10,86,18,89,84,17,93,0,12,3,1,47,38,0,11,41,451,116,28,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059690297321453034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933188584302393,0.09294900441555104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856715869481485,0.0,0.0,0.1107831269067556,0.0,0.0,0.04596258827716288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0466352550839488,0.2383339949009895,0.0,0.0,0.06292765406577362,0.058614696265278585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06235086500109439,0.0,0.12776281765402492,0.0,0.0,0.059085490140405074,0.048112757554920296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06135233601871853,0.0,0.0,0.048106450630277416,0.0566900241792723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067192962363577,0.0,0.09411779502215092,0.053370316194324585,0.0,0.05463534155173328,0.052653613658255896,0.06285060193235584,0.02824115669099285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043152197440237176,0.0,0.029181095661523607,0.10715933928456804,0.15871386868639542,0.0468471810512395,0.04467106540588107,0.0,0.0,0.05530364617043447,0.04939097618909523,0.05945698171939363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873910241725892,0.0,0.0,0.11231206783180656,0.11802436500569652,0.05602551310506184,0.0,0.055004347106630005,0.06444732331037993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05829643728359764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21486897140228764,0.04552797475781517,0.12601013352532686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03945090742471849,0.0545742988773358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04690278803851364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456515494976723,0.056626579947578824,0.0,0.12168145077537823,0.0,0.0,0.11257417846431522,0.0,0.0563960108753348,0.0,0.08916330025986062,0.059363323817952535,0.041058674766366716,0.04141458756892806,0.12923275345483365,0.05394356070273263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569541718470815,0.127437080143301,0.11886390877526805,0.0,0.0,0.2419351525413304,0.0,0.11616514259664755,0.09753806710791146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05344415958156322,0.0,0.0561480927073681,0.0,0.0,0.05586851362354238,0.0,0.035781117543724886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04769849748330357,0.0,0.08883372919403508,0.05591899600369316,0.5087395940223155,0.04450792755982455,0.0,0.058267276226976,0.06309844271972216,0.0,0.09240501748730708,0.0,0.0,0.05693550639475524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252330728407385,0.03953332321769289,0.0,0.044604596510775175,0.0,0.1919396391950136,0.0,0.0,0.0610945530237565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398960986394745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131954923114357,0.0,0.05487568083661861,0.04434135984185705,0.06513713212012133,0.0,0.10588498278245853,0.0,0.06205518129160434,0.0,0.0,0.05456065490958111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04608490353410788,0.032943781783225004,0.0,0.044802227572954434,0.0,0.2008756533406651,0.051776660352090866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05691938516904755,0.03967665206666622,0.06106692368432722,0.0,0.035967757666354995
mentalhealth,ColeTanaka,2020/01/09,"Need help with my brother He has had an ingoing issue of staying up very late and not being able to get up in time for school. He started to develop an automatic response to being woken up. The issue I am noticing now is that he is becoming hostile toward our mother. She has taken him to a few doctors to try to identify the issue and he is constantly denying the doctors' advice. Now he is saying that the issue isn't some sleep disorder, but there is some underlying mental issue. He says that the issue is our mother because by coming into his room to wake him up, that prevents him from doing so. Every time we try to help him he deflects and claims we don't understand, when it is obvious he is unintentionally deluding himself in order to protect his habits. 

He seems to have given up on reality, he is more invested in his online friends than his real ones, and he has no motivation to graduate. My mother's observation is that he seems to feel blamed for his problems and even positivity seems hostile.

I am really concerned because at this rate he will likely drop out and become a hikikomori. I guess I'm looking for guidance. Where should I look for answers?",7.521324404761906,7.104792531250002,8.599821428571431,66.65351190476193,63.41964285714286,10.859523809523811,36.970238095238095,10.317481424215053,3.984013095238096,933,41,156,19,12,321,131,224,0.083,0.82,0.09699999999999999,0.5467,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,4,0,0,1,7,5,2,0,9,0,24,4,2,1,1,30,40,9,0,3,2,4,1,1,1,2,2,2,1,0,7,12,0,2,7,0,1,1,4,3,0,1,4,5,21,2,35,32,4,28,0,0,2,0,37,16,0,6,9,117,28,5,0.105923366805077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350708813094292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291398025184581,0.23396807331985506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09124360140670276,0.0,0.11446552955083528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139735512875492,0.21683410856471064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996138478768882,0.0,0.08924500497062725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053558036897713976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183613043933048,0.0,0.055340587329911435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116686530441758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199640000139527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.663338851139052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11948617145323548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051748806625038835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17789790126928814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674584029776277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854083433585722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059445516292833,0.0,0.0,0.07177641466539955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135435676930298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056398100035035,0.06785722109815208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684690254720724,0.0,0.10720010218540103,0.0,0.2892859648077117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599986339380144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497310420921048,0.1129002154618048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352953399438404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383002613648185,0.0,0.0,0.11026996043225087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739787080656455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iguerr,2020/01/09,"How to know if I am bipolar? Does anyone here know some place (virtually, I mean, a website, etc) that is trustworthy (run by professionals and all) where I can learn more about bipolarity in order to have more clarity if that is my case.

I mean, I already am pretty sure I am bipolar from analyzing the symptoms and observing them in me etc, but I'm always afraid to say for sure that I am because I don't know if can 100% trust in the websites I visited.",12.110842490842488,6.161671439560442,12.05978021978022,62.62688644688647,59.87912087912088,15.649816849816851,46.81684981684981,12.45797560212912,5.448491575091573,355,15,72,8,3,122,60,91,0.0,0.825,0.175,0.9253,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,1,3,0,10,4,0,1,3,17,16,7,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,12,3,10,16,6,8,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,4,0,53,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22827846557271925,0.0,0.17212658827760785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14464342010027315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610176537378984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18102720619616952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4614138557491258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3410594862365522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4506689041013838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161278074947174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21045404060352849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450576126437733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3899318606300655,0.21500986446257306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PaperOval,2020/01/09,"I need an online counselor but I'm too young I'm fed up with saying I can solve problems on my own, because it clearly isn't working. I know there's something wrong with me, and I don't know what it is. I need to speak with a professional about it, but I can't without consent from a parent.

I can't tell my parents about any of this because they still treat me like I'm a child. I'm turning 18 this year, but they're still gonna treat my mental state like it's something I'm making up or that it's just hormones. It's not, and I know it.

Legally I'm supposed to get consent from an adult before I can do online counseling. I need help, but I don't know where to get it.",2.036867321867323,2.8974496891891914,3.6897051597051593,92.573230958231,75.75675675675676,5.922358722358723,25.61670761670761,5.565023196281405,0.4958837837837833,526,18,123,2,11,176,76,148,0.055,0.746,0.19899999999999998,0.9537,2,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,1,8,6,0,0,5,0,9,1,0,1,1,23,28,7,0,4,8,2,0,2,0,1,0,2,0,2,12,5,1,0,4,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,1,2,17,4,15,26,1,9,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,1,6,73,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868745773886398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21278565957313691,0.0,0.14851351771459914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18237109158467044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698483752516672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3836719627062103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17053462581000514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165011833354438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17588677999721775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3882388600181841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3875933251018518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670031487982538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879451572490506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687258706192663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787622867118598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254829164913067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18984023846951573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824221267229028,0.0,0.12706106718388546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19082288172463785,0.0,0.11239261375841664
mentalhealth,Sillybunny_UwU,2020/01/09,"What's wrong with me... This is my first post here and sorry for the bad formatting...
Now on to my story

Ever since I was young I have always daydream to escape from reality,sometimes I used to do it for hours. I remember that daydreams would always be revolving around my interest. For instance I was always into videogames such as Minecraft,fnaf,undertale and roblox. And videogames have always beeny primary interest.sometimes to the point we're that's all I think about all day. I don't play them or anything,I just happened to really like them for some reason.
So everyday I would make scenarios in my head for hours to the point I forget about reality. 

I also here voices in my head,and that's been a problem ever since I was ten. At first they weren't that bad, most of the voices I heard before were really positive.Now the voices are really negative for some reason.

I also have an intrusive thought problem were I have thoughts that come right outta the blues and Annoy me for hours. I had this problem ever since I was 7 or 8",4.319400000000002,6.1747967400000014,5.215,79.93750000000001,71.6,8.4,26.5,9.017664075816787,2.2067,828,28,151,17,16,270,110,200,0.157,0.804,0.039,-0.9676,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,3,2,14,10,1,0,8,0,20,1,1,4,5,33,28,10,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,4,0,0,9,8,0,0,6,1,0,1,3,7,0,3,12,5,26,3,25,13,5,23,0,0,1,0,4,9,0,5,13,114,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738402922060184,0.3617584457189585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675802567275314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18150487464558454,0.0,0.0,0.09248802773215302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362766444763032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700966973082454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949516716649386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18490500256148834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611508423924442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230966278998151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211161955235225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05310092792872293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255208038276753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054962367470147,0.0,0.10409592425648954,0.0,0.0,0.3120077975748753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20889069576531627,0.2235048820778521,0.0,0.0,0.12312570457542575,0.09282151229692254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697309324050861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149963383175586,0.1216706655790236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964479817820111,0.0,0.17257701164544692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938741183424631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544219227868099,0.11883653588216601,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fractalbedlam,2020/01/09,"Making anxiety manifest in visible and embarrassing ways Does anyone else with social anxiety experience this? I’m so tired of it. I’ll be stressed out about something and I’ll cause my body to do something I cannot hide, because that’s fun... not. It used to be sweating above my top lip (gross) even when it wasn’t hot, or looking in inappropriate places, now it’s facial twitches. I’m sure there’s been others.

I say making it happen because the thoughts in my head actually make it happen. I think “wouldn’t it be mortifying if...” and no amount of CBT can stop it. Eventually they stop but something else replaces it. It all revolves around interacting with people. I spend so much time trying to stop it happening I cannot live in the moment. Anyone?",2.995000000000001,5.616566833333334,4.379000000000001,80.76600000000002,78.58333333333334,7.173333333333334,26.266666666666666,8.238735603445708,2.006370000000001,600,24,110,12,15,198,92,144,0.121,0.848,0.031,-0.8489,0,0,3,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,1,8,5,0,2,2,0,10,7,5,5,2,24,22,9,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,14,7,0,3,2,0,1,0,6,3,0,0,3,3,9,2,14,15,3,16,0,0,1,0,4,8,0,2,7,65,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.1359146621292758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21309367639404106,0.0,0.0,0.19477200826654525,0.1427061666138731,0.0,0.12398642431710878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16980443404050405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547058057777775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307626682699126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188260094122087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326968104092473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199141640986666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362400331991882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3694876637334305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293880522146635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229845055946792,0.0,0.11695794732885427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789062600507331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238492255031964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655742012686053,0.0,0.14551525081061015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075898741424707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14197578089795912,0.0,0.32166766640255445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34932645608037194,0.15954180373283344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312673115883497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892433411943155,0.0,0.11057070689732157,0.08121377839417665,0.1600788954112512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456021966057053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12029096489182152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055192602304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheFakeZzig,2020/01/10,"Halp! I have anxiety, depression and OCD (and possibly a bunch of other problems, but still waiting on the final diagnosis).

My brain is also completely fucked.

Before all of this started, I was a fairly good programmer.  I could solve complicated problems; I had no issues navigating and understanding legacy clusterfucks (500+ line functions buried in a 10K line class); picking up new languages was a breeze.

Now, something like...

    if not some_check():
    return val_one()
    
return val_two()

... makes my brain completely shit itself.  Like, hardcore shit itself.  Embarrass-the-family-in-a-restaurant shit itself.

If anyone here is unfortunate enough to recognize me and my post history, they'll know I had a nice schizophrenia scare, so I've been ragged for a few months, but this has been going on for three years, and even with therapy and meds, this is seriously affecting my work: it's really hard to perform at your job as a programmer when you can barely code anymore.

Does anyone have a brain they're willing to spare?  I'll happily accept ""slightly-used"", and don't worry about the installation cost; I know a guy.",7.375553375196233,8.786101586734695,7.327755102040816,69.37988226059655,63.74489795918368,10.724646781789641,34.974882260596544,10.727762888450028,4.178259497645211,885,39,139,23,13,283,137,196,0.214,0.6729999999999999,0.113,-0.973,1,0,1,0,0,0,52.0,0,2,1,2,8,14,4,1,11,0,17,7,6,3,1,25,25,15,0,5,5,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,8,0,1,4,0,1,1,3,9,0,1,6,1,14,5,15,16,4,17,0,1,0,1,4,5,4,2,12,89,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256558843651943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811483039575893,0.0,0.12719463484735466,0.17935795074065214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913567697458106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4295254554191837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689461464736613,0.0,0.0,0.10240129239119627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046596341102732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223693656144798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325218434959945,0.0,0.08471130980189047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404972358710821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856980946327485,0.0,0.0,0.07289035121663827,0.1075743256905119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269927519972675,0.0,0.0,0.11489141279676457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386504353555564,0.12727343550825365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409713406242762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253179651373394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561130129640439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246254653805698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237202843970662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386961259407778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14458839869661191,0.12283297030537985,0.0,0.0,0.2454456938527215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216352629647303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840576857353006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3949561717677447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873707209257744,0.0,0.0,0.09077964761202742,0.0,0.10242471979468322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14667092915790095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13351812300980034,0.15427514075201618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093371268808502,0.13024931945380613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259210459911985
mentalhealth,LivingOyVey,2020/01/10,"How i think i work Everyday feels like another day of waiting for something i dont know what but im curious to see what’s going to eventually pop up. This feeling of waiting in line for something you have no idea about is rotting my brain away. my thought process is a boomerang , i leave from one thought and think about 300 things that are relevant/irrelevant ,then before i know it im back at the original thought but i realize that the original thought isnt important anymore so i dive back into the 300 things im thinking about and try to remember everything im thinking about. so if you really think about it im constantly shutting things down and away because of constant new outlooks on the things im thinking.",5.116499999999999,6.487200507142859,5.631428571428572,79.62357142857144,68.92857142857143,9.6,37.57142857142857,9.888512548439397,3.9120857142857135,581,33,109,14,10,187,82,140,0.045,0.861,0.09300000000000001,0.7478,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,1,10,1,0,0,5,0,6,1,1,3,0,29,24,10,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,11,4,0,2,17,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,3,11,1,22,20,0,20,0,0,1,0,2,9,0,1,11,69,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026743254815909,0.0,0.0,0.09710717647379782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839921551479275,0.1505839842779816,0.0,0.05968918591220769,0.0,0.08332000368000153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930755648468696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116265981720873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314824978853509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475778623771273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800132597726973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901937463544133,0.06995179726255389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05564838648521349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053617365792934,0.63460182277992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076250493440853,0.0,0.0,0.10367977651549856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04783721330122578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456867692846913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635097275237645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272802353146638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109206716791174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780270298684146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507623068489736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26020634282501226,0.3764468753062205,0.0,0.31094007728274803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664790947670148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712846126619325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway37762,2020/01/10,"I dont feel emotion as much as other people As the title says I don't feel emotion as much as other people. 

For example when a close family member tried to commit suicide, I didnt feel anything nor do i now
I also didnt get emotional when our pets died.
I didnt get emotional when a family member was diagnosed with a terminal disease. 
I don't get emotional when everybody else gets emotional about something.",5.8588888888888935,6.3277692098765455,7.626765432098768,69.23644444444446,66.77777777777777,11.418271604938273,33.48395061728395,11.20814326018867,4.203516543209877,330,14,56,10,5,116,44,81,0.187,0.7829999999999999,0.03,-0.865,0,0,1,0,0,2,5.0,1,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,0,8,1,0,0,1,6,15,11,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,4,8,0,9,11,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,40,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680941102497646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961977312590456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287052489703156,0.12563827660488194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187815428481498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112776933290704,0.8170384374934268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282439367976455,0.0,0.18363049565907674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529895933480916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779819639577632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678516605843722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626955617548263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319575835641193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241694472804946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218990251808952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kvati,2020/01/10,Feeling of unworthiness in society I have adhd and always feel I am unworthy in social interactions. How can I combat it?,5.050909090909091,7.701506818181822,8.545454545454547,53.38818181818184,71.72727272727272,11.672727272727276,33.72727272727273,11.20814326018867,5.497836363636364,98,5,13,4,2,37,19,22,0.23600000000000002,0.6990000000000001,0.066,-0.5994,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,4,5,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5865283367008126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40608775104023065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4935346162998301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4974945539559658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaysway9090,2020/01/10,"Recommendations Hi, can anyone recommend the best CBD for anxiety etc. I know little about it. Local health shop sells it but no doubt its shite as its Ireland. Ta",1.9800000000000004,4.747337000000002,3.27,82.305,95.66666666666666,6.4,19.333333333333336,7.554174236665415,1.285533333333334,130,4,23,3,5,42,28,30,0.207,0.6709999999999999,0.122,-0.4678,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161334435576305,0.0,0.0,0.2889524772573687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43367808125400414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.460880545299455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4392630977143116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271101890240566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41418286973682394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NePetunia,2020/01/10,"hi there. im constantly nervous. hi there! im having a bit of trouble because i almost always feel nervous. it gets better when im able to get my mind to think about something else but when im by myslef i feel anxious. my stomach aches and i cry a lot. in the past few days i have not eaten much because i cant tell if im hungry or just anxous. when im with my friends doing something fun i dont feel like that but its hard for me to force myself to do things outside my room. its like i never want to do anything because im busy worrying about it. to add onto it i get sad about it and end up crying a lot. i dont really know where that comes from since there are not that many stressful things happening in my life, id say i should be happy. im 20 yo and i still wait untill all my roomates are in proper positions to get out of my room. it sounds bad but i dont think i have social anxiety or anything like that. i dont get panic attacks and i still enjoy myself among others. should i think about going to therapy or something?",0.07470852017937091,2.160441547085206,2.4403695067264586,93.45384573991032,86.4439461883408,4.823605381165919,19.682331838565023,6.152001189255117,0.009563013452915214,807,24,178,7,25,275,118,223,0.182,0.693,0.126,-0.8129,0,0,3,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,14,16,1,4,4,0,16,3,1,0,2,35,34,15,0,4,10,0,4,3,1,2,1,2,2,0,14,8,1,1,7,0,0,2,8,8,0,0,1,6,26,8,26,30,6,23,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,7,14,115,40,0,0.077774814358769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778802420316494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471487595697209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05949752010543005,0.08786340250464791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280040907472195,0.0,0.0,0.08848007926985367,0.0,0.0,0.06493872133340606,0.14223241486013302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878550299708193,0.08490995377946181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699611591737736,0.0,0.08404694431283594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17086396309835306,0.050158321111548165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3646060127675393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497087755054938,0.0,0.06888540073394397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797584903447812,0.055562342918047285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008862864481629,0.0,0.20317065232686726,0.0,0.044201219321388666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877601148219058,0.0827927361017061,0.06967095713506165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.672081165860974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04274300398446622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05493465145611611,0.11399053721423025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224273182828852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885145451998013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853039139502017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571734374385301,0.0,0.05998473149870037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912519871301261,0.0,0.0,0.0742448607091255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049824537616168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061849654030564374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643361301403291,0.0,0.0,0.07928162882544057,0.0,0.17962455548106482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422213442547254,0.0,0.08909078707430172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679786158132713,0.0,0.0889422783615343,0.0,0.10334026154631544,0.14950488189521016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04587360058475833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898409926065966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i-il-ii-L,2020/01/10,"Could i have some disease, disorder etc.? I have bad social skills like in public speaking, interactions and such, i have a hard time on focusing on really anything, i have bad memory. 

I have these moments where my thought totally wanders Off and when i return i still feel like im not there and i can see everything but i cant focus my hearing/thought on anything.

I can give more info if wanted",2.5895129870129883,5.102767090909094,4.25465909090909,81.70198863636367,79.38961038961041,7.486363636363637,27.806818181818183,8.472884824447931,2.430923376623377,314,14,57,7,8,105,53,77,0.111,0.838,0.051,-0.4678,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,0,9,0,0,0,1,13,14,6,0,3,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,4,12,2,5,12,4,11,0,0,1,0,5,6,0,2,7,43,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36763870142487176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3730191284331842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17834749722816687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25600815867186505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24912319947453984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20075587507814616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294557771642773,0.15957980310842554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21428253834706384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001009503574662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412843269567632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182603843962096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310033532034264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800168903168853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277036217990305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783882996309577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3546710610240579,0.1302522962957248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175290610023047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashleyg1997,2020/01/10,"Cipralex side effects Everyone's different but cipralex gave me the worst two weeks of my life. The first week of taking the prescription (5 milligrams) I was fine and actually felt happier. One week later I upped my dose to 10! Which is still very low. You can go up to 40. My side effects mostly happened at night. As soon as I would lay down to sleep I would have a rapid heart rate. I had panic attacks for HOURS. I would be so exhausted I would start to fall asleep but the feeling of ""falling asleep"" told my brain that I was dying not falling a sleep if that makes sense. I would hallucinate at night and get suicidal thoughts. Which I never have. I usually can control my panic attacks after a while, but the medication made it so I couldn't calm myself down and my heart would keep racing. I told the doctor right away and I slowly had to come off the pill. It was so mentally challenging. My hubby had to take care of me for a few days because I was in complete psychosis. Now that I'm off the pill and it's out of my system I'm taking CBD oil, and continuing to do yoga and meditation. I feel much better with this route. I don't want to scare anyone though. As I said it is different for everyone just make sure you are safe and talk to your doctor!! If you dont feel right listen to your gut!",1.7610167582030698,4.032773996197722,3.1495732995352768,89.83103788198845,80.90114068441066,6.329756372341922,21.908041120968875,7.526774132740827,0.848176566680749,1023,32,214,16,27,333,148,263,0.157,0.741,0.102,-0.9575,2,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,5,0,6,8,15,2,3,12,0,25,16,8,6,2,42,51,21,2,10,7,0,4,0,0,6,8,2,0,0,10,11,0,3,7,1,0,5,5,8,0,3,14,7,34,7,34,29,4,40,0,1,0,0,11,16,0,3,18,146,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.09397328807376958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733403797203777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21910652634520786,0.09047545983480644,0.0,0.0,0.05870257390300556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516805561754008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750079456833332,0.0,0.0,0.09818257498899544,0.0,0.0,0.08295249257466966,0.10096697673177762,0.0,0.1080067760761928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210446236457691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09994247277336032,0.20122253727924805,0.0,0.197130861817648,0.0,0.0,0.11286093661040995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840343801854995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607400155991002,0.0,0.09246150744171082,0.0,0.0,0.08191131831863901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050311907780802564,0.0,0.054728565489836116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515630352105258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282279917478722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483446650774363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559438872002935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801836501425536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111981715788524,0.12855977866658586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701044586890537,0.09704607652659536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079035970438785,0.0,0.07427121596684767,0.0,0.0,0.18073893623895848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06525424701321121,0.0,0.0,0.22597070535165897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447651140303446,0.09160177288851193,0.0,0.09641143714293232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927357698628582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816046028798688,0.0,0.07690397825634136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533475347512368,0.0,0.09076004526154936,0.0,0.21721310030823626,0.07740095751143608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946126295491044,0.07645012487246731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840343801854995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940694849196664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605901594682347,0.07945621520141914,0.056799255595256164,0.0,0.2317341577750055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4104454643479019,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ventaccount1818,2020/01/10,"I don't know what to do. I feel drained and burnt out. I go to school from 9-5 during the week and work from 5-11 most of the week. If I don't work at my job in the evening I have to work for assignments for my college. On weekends I always work for college as well so I can finish assignments in time.
I know that I have lots of mental problems and I feel very close to a complete burnout. My college knows that students that work often struggle with burnout. They advise you to just not work. This isn't possible for me tho as I get the minimum of support from my parents. When I didn't work I couldn't eat for the last week of the month because I simply didn't have any money.
I barley see my dad and don't speak to my mother anymore because she made my mental problems even worse. This was a big step for me but it still makes me sad to think about it.
At the moment I just feel like I'll never reach my goals and dreams because I don't have time to achieve them and tbh I don't feel like I have the talent to become good at what I'm studying.
I would love to visit a psychiatrist but I don't have the time to figure out where to go and how to pay for it. Also I don't want to spend more time because I'm already always *just* in time for assignments.
I just don't know what to do. I have no friends. no time. no money. Everything only gets worse.

Sorry for the long post I just had to vent.
Thanks for listening.",0.931609573502726,2.7492099309210545,2.510775862068968,95.73250000000004,81.26973684210526,5.2457350272232315,21.00907441016334,6.129581340695534,-0.0014932849364797107,1105,32,256,8,29,361,140,304,0.10400000000000001,0.78,0.11599999999999999,0.8874,2,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,2,11,17,13,0,1,13,0,25,2,0,3,1,42,48,17,0,6,9,3,4,2,1,1,0,2,0,0,11,11,1,0,10,2,4,4,17,4,1,0,5,7,40,9,46,41,3,35,0,1,1,1,13,12,0,4,20,169,51,22,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545992390933126,0.07642443374239966,0.15903783878157146,0.0,0.0,0.06498844457923145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477621189973302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23302561716082434,0.10554560564992256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019957602140356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778830865226662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262414418300424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858889386051676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19328501915942084,0.136545343008956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383438115043198,0.0,0.09985902305179613,0.0,0.10862520075071776,0.08015658128073075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483492843399696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210083226652287,0.07789938961813611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337785381398776,0.0,0.0,0.08457327682984676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124715513062837,0.0862524276900931,0.09042725990125,0.063791329268073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926169533299512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628020687862308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370671670443324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268257088591128,0.0,0.0,0.10611520293527026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773678252670556,0.09152621599100738,0.0,0.0,0.18288832008032088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671832186628143,0.0761540659017211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10697878612534724,0.0,0.0,0.07631946865275795,0.0,0.0,0.0999067747485854,0.0,0.0,0.10844764401827628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879847223102545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061235104892310564,0.0,0.0,0.3343532977663802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885230729050699,0.05636755217594601,0.0,0.22997285954611135,0.0,0.08592569111420896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4870144576454119,0.0,0.19478069849119614,0.06788764478380194,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,steinbukken,2020/01/10,"Back Burner Anxiety? So its been a stressful like... month pretty much. I got bad news at the beginning of the week. I have gotten not alot of sleep recently and not eating all the time. And its gotten to the point where its like, im not mentally anxious anymore but my body has just gone to hell. Im weak, im exhausted. I havent been wanting to sleep or eat. I do so out of pure necessity. Everything hurts anytime i try to do anything. I cant concentrate or think. Sometimes my body will feel jittery or shaky when i wake up so my physical anxiety runs my energy into the ground and im just. I cant feel my emotions. I somewhat feel numb and cant make any decisions. Can someone please help me make sense of this all?",0.9004681872749103,3.2569681224489813,2.9537815126050435,89.28680672268908,85.4625850340136,6.7241296518607445,23.61304521808724,7.928766900206844,1.466570548219288,562,22,118,12,17,189,89,147,0.198,0.7120000000000001,0.091,-0.9584,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,8,10,1,2,7,0,12,10,5,2,3,30,24,12,0,1,9,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,6,2,0,5,0,0,2,7,8,0,0,6,3,15,2,12,17,5,16,1,1,0,0,1,7,1,6,9,73,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802345602049982,0.0,0.19804208043745208,0.14623005291228633,0.1283694320422583,0.0,0.0,0.10651786995139892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953116359860756,0.10807676900673012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875567229440341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648983197459885,0.0,0.14560227569853199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633208424833465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963458522536848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352477773446636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676072347609112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385679095856991,0.0,0.5592684874683885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647542900435754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17280405163326196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044480468809316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331755866581953,0.0,0.09515309609562736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14208595504081625,0.12236238477906752,0.0,0.0,0.13168674124373486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12780611901885092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590664224254326,0.0,0.10967386435617403,0.0,0.12801920410684045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482727749723011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293975332534011,0.0,0.0,0.07547734829835011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788108096447263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634690723969455,0.0,0.10382874483420004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pearhub,2020/01/10,"Anyone to chat? Human without emotions here. Hey, 23F here. I've been struggling with my mental health for around 7 years now. It started with issues with the way i look and then take over my whole life. I have been living a pointless life for around 2 years now. No friends, no proper job, nothing. If anyone is feeling numb and would like to tell someone about their problems without judging, please message me, i will listen to you.",3.577314814814816,6.17562381481482,3.072330246913584,91.06923611111117,76.28395061728395,4.05,26.174382716049386,3.1291,0.4369123456790125,343,13,61,0,8,101,62,81,0.165,0.753,0.08199999999999999,-0.7321,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,0,7,5,0,1,2,0,6,4,0,0,0,13,11,4,0,3,3,0,1,1,1,2,4,1,0,1,1,7,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,3,8,2,14,7,1,10,0,0,1,0,9,3,0,1,7,42,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569467857595211,0.0,0.0,0.3271303047047676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20667973312448634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290310001269793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14195498287917688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953041588910353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19177400566844985,0.18233091999196965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25955817873700965,0.08976476428001699,0.0,0.16224340289971986,0.0,0.15429305731681112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18516398381184546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17630089561598578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20168838108942924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758117826768802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15568001878485546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300502072529847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920821205239593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13814758387191736,0.0,0.16059449951776436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458421171705072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051361347943145,0.0,0.3542324027333243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052170686387424,0.0,0.0,0.23664159540431245
mentalhealth,Mimi9335,2020/01/10,"what is this weird feeling okay so generally right now i think my mental health is okay. however, i do have an empty feeling that wont go away and a sadness that i cant explain. i dont think it's depression because like, i can still do things with my day, despite it taking quite a bit of energy. and like, i still can make jokes and stuff. 

it's just that when im alone it's gotten a lot worse lately and ive been on the verge of tears a lot, for no apparent reason. 

 i just feel a bit like im stuck in a rut in terms of what i use my days for. i feel like it takes me so much effort to do things i used to once do easily, and i cant really find joy in anything anymore without the guilt that im wasting my time. i always have this looming sense that whatever im doing is useless because im going to fail at it anyway, despite all the positive self talk i try to do.  it's getting to the point where someone innocently asking ""what did you get upto"" is triggering and i feel like crying because i know i havent done anything productive to show for myself.

i also get random episodes where my stomach just sinks for no reason, and my heart skips a beat and my hands start tingling. it's weird because it's like im nervous but there's nothing to be nervous about. i used to only feel this way before public speaking or a date or something but now i could just be in my kitchen and get it.

it's also making me guilty feeling like im ruinign everyone's vibe around me by being so miserable all the time, although i try to hide it, but when i dont keep it up and i let go i just feel like people dont like what they see. i dont blame them, but im just struggling to balance relationships with effort i take into being satisfied with my productivity levels. 

i dont know if this makes any sense, and im not expecting a diagnosis, i was just wondering if other people feel the same way?",2.911139317276035,3.8637909924623095,4.764423843354702,85.34821608040201,73.74874371859295,7.4997054236700755,26.286952001386236,7.873277556716777,1.4251532490036392,1477,50,316,20,29,506,187,398,0.128,0.758,0.114,-0.7245,2,1,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,2,5,24,24,0,5,16,2,34,6,3,9,2,68,71,27,0,4,17,0,10,9,0,1,2,1,1,1,30,16,1,1,18,2,0,3,13,11,0,0,6,12,44,13,33,58,9,35,0,5,1,0,10,16,0,8,23,207,74,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062402730720469625,0.0,0.09636674238632614,0.05013435392665215,0.0,0.0,0.04097331435888888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059753630803981765,0.0,0.0,0.09916425388572532,0.05363690785083095,0.0563273329237381,0.0,0.056608582953211126,0.0,0.0,0.14691583907604053,0.0,0.05126987437251452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155879886119426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048106188022296034,0.0,0.06618381224263464,0.07771489895599827,0.0,0.05189481774911487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06165854685055441,0.3530735131909022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05757321099000265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741862461835373,0.17217569368127894,0.0,0.0,0.05506908622120135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259163892770046,0.0,0.10272752009544722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404488378278844,0.0,0.07139871533503905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5857408958259176,0.0,0.0,0.05355459992172525,0.0,0.0,0.06622566629256334,0.0,0.06796669498749876,0.0,0.0,0.06161158412897035,0.0,0.2649240311047096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244791207070973,0.0,0.0,0.12065570445922436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06071967894244415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04429203186068634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05781326129786581,0.0,0.0,0.06416623854973433,0.0,0.04582423605614912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354207283875571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056957459794448814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408524374850931,0.0,0.0,0.03859886874760586,0.12389784393457727,0.0,0.06468792285766399,0.0,0.05145473842638343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0480129121738654,0.0,0.06285580500992399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05105118481343331,0.04638480671426455,0.0,0.0,0.04264655938070384,0.0,0.09623438754563272,0.0,0.0,0.06298830068729891,0.06897393668276862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590564590413468,0.04842814318870683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800572846756359,0.07721388683162868,0.0,0.0,0.07026665978857767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181408273080562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561147222704412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956502052783443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808061946548496,0.06534054558067834,0.0,0.0,0.0614017679757963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myconfessionthroway,2020/01/10,"I’m hesitant to seek help because I’m afraid it’ll affect my job prospects A lot of jobs require security clearance (government positions for example) and I’m afraid that counseling and agreeing to disclose mental health information will affect me adversely, especially relating to the issues that are talked about/that I may be diagnosed with.",11.234858757062149,11.197086610169496,10.680000000000003,53.520790960452004,55.77966101694915,15.324293785310733,48.48022598870057,14.06817628641468,7.59648700564972,286,17,39,11,3,93,47,59,0.064,0.773,0.163,0.7096,2,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,2,2,0,5,2,0,2,0,9,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,6,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,21,6,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890831298374973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148266383393296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3297073250069554,0.0,0.0,0.20790742446801747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237478135326877,0.6156124911825305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637043355089904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125889491390499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493113048648137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sweetsteeths,2020/01/10,"just......moody? \[F 19\] For the past six months I have been noticing some strange pattern regarding my mood. I will wake up, either in a good mood that will persist for the rest of the day, or in a terrible, cranky, agitated one which is apparently not subject to change either. Otherwise I will wake up depressed, on the verge of tears, for no apparent reason. This is really starting to affect my life. I suspect it is some sort of serotonin or hormonal imbalance? Not really worth seeking out professional help since there is no underlying 'problem' causing my mood swings. Has anyone on here experienced anything similar?",5.918929292929293,8.291201236363637,6.34030303030303,71.374898989899,68.45454545454545,9.979797979797981,34.94949494949495,10.25414643259724,4.230555555555553,496,25,79,14,9,160,79,110,0.185,0.768,0.047,-0.9263,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,2,7,0,0,6,0,10,3,2,3,0,15,11,2,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,3,0,2,1,1,7,1,16,7,5,13,0,1,0,0,1,9,0,5,4,58,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852075152450418,0.0,0.2179704466223293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27210069974018114,0.28020377349380865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082316027072514,0.0,0.2281373813429608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221654906629664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754085444994974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187089810068304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21142156162710266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015631750008038,0.0,0.0,0.1794868882439798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528541916701556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25345063822562097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33937280140191434,0.2723367273965945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191082322256869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874806541847196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Young_Dracula,2020/01/10,"I think I might need help Hello there kind Redditors!

I come to you because I need to get something off my chest and nether know how to talk about this, nor how to explain this in rl. 

​

Pls let me introduce myself:   
I'm a 19 year old male from Europe with now particular interests beside my friends and somewhat music.   
I've been in therapy for depression for a short time during a relationship crisis, but finished it after about 4 months in late spring last year. I broke up by now and am therefor single.   
I'm currently supposed to study informatics and mathematics at a local university and still live with my parents.   
I use drugs from time to time, to be precise alcohol, caffeine and cannabis but rarely in high dosages.   
I used to sing in a boys choir for ten years and still sing in a choir at my university.   
I think I'm at least somewhat intelligent, since I managed to finish school without problems even tho I struggled to attend regularly and managed to score high on IQ-test through out my live (I know that this is a strongly debated topic and nothing I should be too proud of).   
I have a best friend I absolutely love, so I'm not really alone. I normally enjoy being for myself more than being in a big group. 

​

​

My problems: 

I start to get more and more paranoid more often when I used to. By know I feel uneasy multiple times per week. I get this feeling that I can sense the presence of someone/something. That goes as far that I had to scream at my open door, ""Let me alone!"" recently (I was alone in the house at the time), while I almost cried. It's not that intense every time but still very unpleasant.   


Sadly that isn't everything. I start to see more and more ""things"". I'm used to thinking that shadows move for a long time already, but by now such phenomena spread more through my daily life. I misinterpret a lot of things at first sight, especially in the dark.   
Trees become man walking by. A bush is a squating creature. A road sign a clown. I'm aware that what I see isn't real and I'm not always scared by them, but it is always very unsettling/hard to see it. Such experiences just make me nervous in a very unpleasant way.   
Further more I already have a few creatures I encounter more often. Those I can't see but ""feel"". I think they are a concept in my head that I can ""feel"" in a very realistic way.   
Two clown creatures, of wich one is somewhere in the dark places of my room while I'm lying in my bed and one is lurking behind the display of my laptop, also when I'm lying in my bed.   
Another one is a tall men with long claws standing behind me when I'm in the dark corridor of the first floor of our house.   
Again: I'm aware that those creatures only exist in my head, but they actually scare me more and more. I can handle the clowns and I once even had the feeling that one of them was watching over me, well meaning, while I was still half asleep in my bed and had my back towards him.   
The tall men always scares me, even though I know he isn't really there.   


Additionally I often feel very disconnected from my own live. It's hard to identify with it. It feels like I'm watching myself existing most of the time, without actually having influence on what I'm doing. I feel detached from my emotions and sometimes have trouble to even identify how I'm feeling at the moment.   
Weirdly enough tho that isn't always the case.  
If I don't feel that way I'm either emotionless and only feel like I have an empty void inside me or feel very exited.   


I also have suicidal thoughts on a daily basis, but that feels normal by now, since I experience these for years and manage not to act on them. I only selfharm from time to time.   
I don't now why I started this habit and I mostly do that in episodes with breaks in between.   
It feels somewhat relaxing and good?   
Often when I have consumed alcohol the urge to selfharm gets a whole lot stronger and I started my latest episode after I was drunk in the beginning of December.   


Strangely my symptoms don't get worse when I'm high on cannabis... I know that there is a possibility that my usage has pushes those experiences forward, but while I'm under the influence I feel like I'm actually myself and free from those experiences. I'm just high, happy and often almost trippy.   
Don't worry tho. I already started to heavily limit my usage since I'm aware that I probably shouldn't consume this drug at the moment. Therefore I also think that this plant isn't a suitable medicine for me.   


Lastly I lose my drive more and more. It's hard to get up in the morning, sometimes I can't even move my body for a long time. I'm often exhausted and I rarely manage to attend my classes. I feel fightend from entering the different buildings of my university and can't concentrate on the lecture. I already missed so much of my lessons, practices and classes that I can't finish this semester, but I still can't help me. By know I somewhat feel like there is no point in trying anymore at all...

​

​

I think I need to go into therapy, but I'm scared of talking about all of this with a therapist, my siblings or parents. 

​

​

Wow... That was hard to write down...

Thank you for reading all this!   
Sorry that my English skills are rather limited, so this text is probably a boring read.   


Still, thank you for reading!

Cheers!",4.033555211920994,5.7325423160422675,4.935737330428059,82.2872033808955,72.04514889529298,7.652496426981561,28.929511960825657,8.292971314355103,2.082504313394719,4225,169,801,67,82,1374,399,1041,0.10099999999999999,0.7859999999999999,0.113,0.9433,4,3,6,0,1,1,147.0,1,3,5,10,57,40,0,6,49,0,57,14,5,12,4,143,141,66,1,11,24,2,20,4,2,3,7,3,5,5,51,39,3,2,33,9,1,12,23,18,1,9,10,30,116,23,133,122,33,147,0,5,7,1,30,66,0,20,70,553,167,12,0.0,0.0,0.10546584308985536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699970837722724,0.07214782685706013,0.11193335367561053,0.15901828472880908,0.08642772947239635,0.11990300861474767,0.27323211102815664,0.3064209041674105,0.0,0.03777543706724623,0.0,0.0,0.035727198756437206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02770106253314512,0.0,0.021960554164303092,0.03978687009470935,0.0,0.0,0.03780609849152225,0.0,0.0,0.040015742186150886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031032416215001992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03957185835632542,0.0,0.0,0.03102834828955975,0.0,0.0,0.037638540656674456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835553103092385,0.0,0.0,0.0405233657305469,0.0,0.03722353735936159,0.0,0.11897112664548888,0.0,0.030352683329693517,0.0,0.032377018652872534,0.14095776216084224,0.0,0.0,0.3096611657120037,0.10294529631776952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061285828644520285,0.0,0.0,0.05566577430232692,0.0,0.11292970333007835,0.0,0.020473882946938703,0.03021612758782616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03834936714026065,0.12908558117483368,0.0,0.07394424985387651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048293702987829534,0.1522498981351167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313621012587262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037514576736731024,0.11879064973509006,0.05873049618899424,0.040637858954584265,0.0,0.0,0.07367616937272355,0.025445579124536728,0.07040013682317844,0.0,0.09543241594637357,0.09564318546450473,0.0,0.04030284923748567,0.0,0.061254468849587435,0.032514040871028584,0.0,0.0240470203863908,0.0,0.0,0.03924187282132461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03821691648182757,0.0,0.0,0.028754874854229024,0.0765779168039497,0.02648257862027261,0.08013642020068698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059385836000466,0.034567035498185204,0.0,0.037802260991640656,0.038365534065028885,0.09764610515049782,0.08219608921224789,0.0,0.0,0.08000317527691247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037638540656674456,0.0,0.034055344576692285,0.04061286440507656,0.0,0.0,0.07768225782177203,0.06894227180817444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810448555771716,0.04100442750241578,0.046157176960281175,0.0,0.035570420027816366,0.0386774535033415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442695573065674,0.0364593038637308,0.11482929710083807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940095440634535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055467732636893516,0.07125944980827427,0.04032712721907631,0.1274936838792964,0.0,0.17261805072526493,0.0,0.0,0.0376612351033136,0.0,0.03940558999842305,0.0,0.0,0.037443851482916735,0.0,0.05791118878730413,0.0,0.06633410638597706,0.0823956363270244,0.04182789407282938,0.04786692428598872,0.13850049835332293,0.035394457818379736,0.028599889178685483,0.23107164996367055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024458664314372613,0.0,0.03519126814098107,0.0,0.0,0.12445640845176068,0.0,0.17834678123358558,0.0,0.0857850941213193,0.028897145872716207,0.0,0.032390873017475195,0.0,0.0325070310153254,0.04022071486716041,0.0,0.06945378239349106,0.0,0.0,0.03658521705417354,0.036712633842523504,0.0,0.0,0.3064209041674105,0.09279588058934786
mentalhealth,Alternate_User_,2020/01/10,"I think my weekend just got ruined I’ve had a horrible week and a tough time at school. When I got home I listened to some music I like and took some photos of the moon - Things that make me feel less depressed to put it simply. I’ve looked forward to a weekend of just chilling out and take a break from school but as my life has shown me multiple times, as soon as I’m feeling a little bit of calmness or happiness something happens. Now what happened is that my Blizzard account has been compromised by someone and I can’t access it. Now I’ve spent the Friday night dealing with this and now I need to anxiously wait for Blizzard to respond (the estimated response time is 24 hours). Now this means it’ll take forever to fall asleep tonight, tomorrow I’ll just wait for their response the whole day and then hopefully get my account back. Regarding how the outcome of this will be I may stay home from school a few days since I really need the weekend to be relaxing days. Not stressful.",5.211435368754955,6.160266360824743,5.37536082474227,83.1035408406027,68.38144329896907,8.44345757335448,32.96431403647898,8.617729084823388,2.5949322759714515,790,35,152,12,13,249,119,194,0.055999999999999994,0.825,0.11800000000000001,0.9433,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,11,9,0,1,12,0,12,2,1,2,0,28,34,14,0,3,6,0,2,1,0,3,1,1,2,0,10,8,0,2,4,4,3,4,2,4,0,0,6,4,15,5,22,23,6,31,0,2,1,0,4,4,0,5,24,96,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338991127279772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440450542971788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14823384828193995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626957369817043,0.13998062574767028,0.11694494944359494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373063528149034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093813224910342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21718731758581866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401351643169536,0.14453765825880754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27239177747606524,0.13485767960376435,0.13371347308492335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590365354005004,0.06633402110852082,0.13608471065822178,0.0,0.0,0.11401889152211593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063252600854024,0.0,0.0,0.14790148641930506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013545703755321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741797247423906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649387508303845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698253409601223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4122421929104715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231653922505687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11504382298643702,0.10452814195003338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447207339458968,0.0,0.0,0.15553265108106815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20417554300180876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020452826567074,0.08700073035734181,0.0,0.0,0.23751883134859814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15085378247158238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891250902601407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515907138475678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jessmfoley,2020/01/10,"What is it called when someone is mean to you, and then gets mad at you for being hurt by them? My boyfriend is rude, impatient, and even mean to me pretty often, and then gets upset at me for feeling bad about it, saying remarks such as ""wow now you're gonna be depressed for the rest of the day"" or just calls me names like ""sensitive"", ""sad"", or ""depressed"". Is there a name for this type of person? Why does he do this?",6.900348837209304,4.769929151162796,6.6531395348837234,85.65668604651167,65.62790697674419,9.530232558139538,30.80232558139535,7.1686216300943375,1.600613953488372,321,8,73,2,4,101,63,86,0.20800000000000002,0.687,0.105,-0.8943,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,1,0,8,10,2,1,3,0,7,0,0,0,0,12,13,9,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,5,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,2,7,2,13,10,1,7,0,4,0,0,10,2,0,3,6,50,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826662779521847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4467832914459543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410904563201449,0.0,0.3768576484166296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19144968582155766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444974724361395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061817864021194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22859967728113964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23420097140448665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688141439162163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4766157635237332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19102410445895607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22257074392321596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17397703346187762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18536561348653524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19740856250417885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vermillion1000,2020/01/10,"What's wrong with my brother?? Hi, I really need some advice regarding my brother. I only know as much as the average person when it comes to mental health. So if anyone could help point me in the right direction here -- and it's not as simple as ""take him to a Doctor"" as he refuses to go. But what sort of mental health illness does this all sound like? 

So first, this whole thing has been going on ever since he left school in 2004. My brother is 31 years old, he still lives with my mum, he hardly ever leaves his bedroom (only to go shopping with my nan) and he never really speaks and when he does it's very quiet. He has no friends -- at all. He's never had a girlfriend, or partner ever. The only time that he seems happy is when Christmas time comes, or Halloween where he decorates our front garden with the most spectacular display. Parents bring their children from all across the town just to trick or treat at Mums house, and he will spend so much money on decorations (i mean upwards of a thousand pound) each year to put on a different display. Then him, my mum, sister and nieces and nephews will all dress up and hand out sweets to the trick or treaters. Truly, he has the kindest heart of anyone I know. I think he loves Halloween and the tradition of it because he seems fascinated by American culture, and the big displays that Americans put on during the holidays

He is obsessed with cleanliness, his bedroom is pretty much empty. He has a bed, and then boxes of washing up powder for when he cleans his clothes, and general cleaning products to keep germs and dust etc. out of his room. 

He has this beanie hat, and he wears it [every.single.day](https://every.single.day). And has done for the last 12 years. He never takes it off. When he has a shower he will take it in with him and wash it in the sink. Though my grandad told me he will keep it on in the shower, I'm unsure how true that last part is.

​

My brother is the kindest soul you will ever meet, ut no one can seem to help him. I don't know what's wrong with him.

​

Any theories? 

​

Thanks for reading.",5.612125805229255,6.316249394088673,5.6423645320197044,82.42233042819252,67.37438423645321,8.118075028419858,28.91587722622205,8.012643519586192,1.7891681697612731,1658,54,320,19,26,521,209,406,0.049,0.845,0.106,0.9813,6,0,0,0,0,0,76.0,1,1,1,1,18,13,2,1,20,0,24,10,3,1,12,65,48,38,0,3,8,10,2,1,3,5,6,3,9,3,19,27,0,3,8,4,3,9,7,5,0,3,4,6,28,8,50,38,13,58,1,0,0,1,59,25,0,11,25,204,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720716460169659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568202661619309,0.2880155552351764,0.05372916630540557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049055266127424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048163455130047994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611936882519504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308265311244754,0.0,0.0,0.10190917663727543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254810650566095,0.0,0.08086956658484666,0.13828348393224593,0.0808541454290328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811647272296852,0.0,0.2858744483113345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720543652824153,0.0,0.0,0.061042540248086315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470875123756654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410707715782709,0.07077698894042883,0.0,0.0,0.16796679817674035,0.0,0.0936266326084111,0.1059167987982332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116634981344013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404545397724016,0.0,0.0,0.1302646573847701,0.12880656821320455,0.0,0.0836596476863044,0.08584404806235607,0.0,0.0,0.03860004858784489,0.0,0.06976683206620564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130915444446517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606450304979801,0.0,0.0,0.1592459765072266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17424321047127078,0.0585845398032247,0.18281098118034425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290717472170073,0.0,0.053538878946923864,0.1802708449440969,0.0,0.0,0.08773069463279687,0.08555958423023642,0.0,0.0,0.06898804395072893,0.0,0.0,0.07468951139329752,0.0,0.0,0.08038106137134335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15885273113562953,0.0,0.0,0.07903087661269051,0.0,0.1012310119691707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747367747448364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996182758302038,0.0,0.21578183199989648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06535747115666538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309708518388904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782159233365185,0.0,0.0,0.07274132821534436,0.0,0.0,0.05249039807495188,0.05062609446632823,0.07762642819637644,0.0,0.09214214443178928,0.0,0.0,0.07549695884797206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519110834867586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821128015757476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276896046788534,0.2880155552351764,0.15263857406260206
mentalhealth,freethinker78,2020/01/10,"Winnipeg woman institutionally abused in Montreal psychiatric hospital hopes new year brings new compensation Woman who spent time in Canadian psychiatric hospital decades ago was subjected to involuntary experiments and treatments that involved torture. Psychiatrist was covertly funded by CIA.

[https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/manitoba/mkultra-allan-winnipeg-cameron-1.5410817](https://www.cbc.ca/news/canada/manitoba/mkultra-allan-winnipeg-cameron-1.5410817)",33.19260162601626,41.693249073170726,19.67170731707317,-21.631788617886173,9.487804878048776,18.149593495934962,60.00813008130081,15.021129683784007,11.96079837398374,416,19,20,13,3,104,35,41,0.15,0.792,0.057999999999999996,-0.6597,0,0,0,0,1,0,34.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,2,0,8,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,5,9,2,0,0.0,0.4035848875866786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30194348193286513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33319657943958186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33831745054006923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6579554331850516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986211580317284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193513115168049
mentalhealth,MetaloidFire,2020/01/10,"Same Night terror/Dream So I know how to should be preparing myself for sleep and to try and clear my mind of my problems (before I fall asleep I clear my mind of worries and only focus on happy thoughts). Yet every single night I am having a dream that is more of a horror show of emotions for me and is more of a night terror. It's not to the point of where I am screaming at the top of my lungs but it's to the point of where I sleep restless and wake up periodically through the night with panic attacks and covered in my own sweat (TMI but I do sleep in my underwear and my room is never really hot). These dreams start off as a normal day and then just starts to put events from my past to people I know now that have nothing to do with the event. They're also people I care about very deeply so when it happens to them it really fucks with my brain. Whenever I wake up and stay awake my entire body becomes different like I don't own it. My natural tremor becomes to the point of where I look like I have Parkinson's disease (I don't, I was born with a tremor and was told that It won't get progressively worse) Its to the point in my life where I don't feel like I am ever awake. These dreams and reality are now being blurred and the way I feel in my dreams and the way I am in real life are almost the same. I do have stuff going on in my life that are really hard on me but my sleep has been an issue for longer than that. I have gotten CT scans and MRI scans on my brain during sleep and it shows that its very active during sleep (which explain why I don't have a good night sleep) but nobody seems to give me the information on how to solve those issues. I want to stop relieving these memories... I want to stop seeing that shit and I want to stop seeing it happen to other people I care about...",4.418813812091315,4.387168102902376,5.220690604565792,86.98238843638869,69.8179419525066,8.068876907192843,23.866123666398988,7.586124646067393,0.8267087530113573,1417,28,316,14,23,462,172,379,0.11,0.7509999999999999,0.139,0.8663,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,2,17,16,3,3,18,0,31,21,16,2,4,56,56,28,0,6,6,0,4,3,0,2,4,1,1,0,24,20,0,3,8,6,0,3,7,8,0,0,6,10,47,8,53,46,7,54,0,0,5,1,5,25,2,3,26,218,71,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458073291662408,0.0,0.0,0.05956144663134104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473149271653499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16451411283673684,0.06337680014111145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273023625114949,0.0,0.16628811462489201,0.0,0.0,0.15187418241415007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048033291278761235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781550936103462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837797186163438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737121767634281,0.06275242006109626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531842101771846,0.05320836388398422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885534891467128,0.038912606746981014,0.07144778381890603,0.04232857072346974,0.062470098950229876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172443252909838,0.07928510206900173,0.06671924625021032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15547506269668532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186426957749299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15782179643656374,0.1091611632067363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625442501354109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15040667552342254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057443391575002174,0.0,0.0,0.34947110236683604,0.07297436284993647,0.07146534981066686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056645222671085724,0.0,0.0873859646904723,0.0,0.0,0.07109936978276203,0.15490468774722851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816298335127855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126708293761455,0.0,0.0748727421498323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477428605065425,0.1431409470120396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870147045521486,0.06780358701818577,0.0,0.0,0.07645241549028574,0.0,0.0,0.5217349216807297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543433170672503,0.07938552693205878,0.0,0.1868052727240133,0.0,0.0,0.08526151962706889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059128619369409614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07116861375325591,0.0,0.05056687609847485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290722384079696,0.13179029740606313,0.11823715227653675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720640949781166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563782363729034,0.0759012504894906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crybabezzz,2020/01/10,"Forgetting significant portions of my life I’m (25F) so terrified that my brain is broken because of how often I completely forget things. 

I have this joke I use when something unpleasant happens to me where I say “[that one’s going in the vault](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=6S5ZuXhNbL4)”. 

It’s no doubt in response from horrible childhood trauma, but I have no idea how to stop it.

I have a whiteboard on my wall I call my “Anxiety Board” where I write all my to do items that I’m putting off (going to the dentist, paying my car registration, etc.) because if I don’t write it down I will actively block it out until I’m pulled over by a cop for expired tags; this has happened many times. 

But sometimes it’s not even negative necessarily, and I just completely forget chunks of my life. Recently this girl sent me a longgggg text about something horrible happening in her life. I was super confused because I wasn’t friends with her at all. We went to high school together and I remember texting her once or twice probably about class, but I couldn’t even really remember that. I only remember her at all because we follow each other on social media. 

I pull up our Facebook chat and Lo and behold, there are YEARS of text conversations there. They took place from 2011 to 2013, and I genuinely started freaking out cause I felt like I was in a bad dream. The texts are real? obviously?? why would they be fake? We talked about school, boys, college, etc. at one point it seems like I went to a birthday party for her (I have zero recollection of it at all). There was texts from her about her dad’s cancer, and family issues I was having back then. 

This is by far the weirdest thing that I’ve noticed, but there’s been others. I was talking to my roommate about how I used to love the show Pretty Little Liars in high school, but I never finished it and hadn’t watched it in years. 

She started laughing, then stopped and asked if I was serious. When I assured her I was, she seemed skeptical and asked why I would lie. I was super confused, until she told me when she first moved in like 6 months ago that my boyfriend at the time and I watched it together all the time. I told her she was probably confused and maybe it was a different show. I texted him to ask, and he confirmed that we had watched together and finished it. Once again, no recollection of this. 

This is me just venting because I’m concerned and I don’t want to really discuss with any of my friends and stuff. I wonder what important things I am forgetting.",4.267132337359609,6.148447307851237,4.731404958677686,83.2447880906972,71.78925619834709,8.021953803771986,29.352405170586987,8.69343788997812,2.3160279296461117,2003,82,379,37,39,635,231,484,0.152,0.722,0.126,-0.8256,1,0,2,0,0,0,66.0,5,0,2,3,25,22,2,4,13,0,34,7,1,6,8,78,63,34,0,6,11,1,1,3,2,3,5,1,0,2,32,24,0,3,10,5,1,12,11,11,0,5,21,5,73,11,54,37,10,67,0,0,3,1,45,29,0,11,29,271,105,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138410686371657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054762486984823465,0.0,0.06160447080081456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225851255949728,0.0,0.0,0.061921836491897066,0.06723835808849014,0.24544867955991576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989700561354164,0.08222912098220161,0.0,0.0,0.08272547408431137,0.0,0.0,0.16886626578874905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413567376874184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17962226189073166,0.10637730076359372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591558196548519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773204764383433,0.0,0.0,0.0684979331759506,0.0,0.0,0.12443302383867713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153298222244306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136346078110446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17016663687449338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090744815266597,0.0,0.08405136239314515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064005990086814,0.118027217082991,0.08071122187440546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268057389848072,0.0,0.0,0.08164377471481442,0.08090221249957294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427748599672115,0.08558959132976425,0.0,0.0,0.06210893552467801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09168280949711842,0.0,0.17152153094896444,0.10913708003014308,0.0612459394579081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413567376874184,0.0,0.07612594195727873,0.0,0.0,0.08192695196782954,0.1736477819724634,0.0,0.0,0.0809538954305659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165964129391667,0.10317788934060726,0.0,0.07951268043509478,0.0,0.2736710040533841,0.0,0.0,0.06403989946160203,0.0,0.2444989663941965,0.0,0.1466211690845566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208918253001478,0.0,0.12399032949758905,0.07964524816062205,0.0,0.11399769286795025,0.0,0.0,0.1346517132916485,0.0,0.0,0.09218644791088816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945233269836187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16049968419769942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087133671080035,0.0,0.0,0.15389783652347014,0.08947069107738577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910241466906814,0.0,0.0,0.04749809542892288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493023946416992,0.14532980870026332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733027417800031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441099376892452,0.0,0.0,0.10371608197519208
mentalhealth,david_the_creator,2020/01/10,"I started a clothing brand that will donate a percentage of all profits towards mental health support and research and I need your help I’m not do this to promote my company. As a matter of fact, the company has zero image right now. I am literally just starting and am currently at the stage of creating a logo. But rather than make it myself, I thought I’d host a contest to make the brand more authentic in its vision. 

The brand is called Mars Lighthouse. I want to build this brand to be authentic and one way I thought was: host a logo design contest for people who struggle through mental illness of any sort. The rules of the contest are simple:

- tell a short personal story of your struggles with mental illness 
- design the logo
- logo must include the brand name
- it can include a small graphic that accompanies the brand name but something simple

I feel like this would make the brand feel truly authentic in what the brand believes in. The winner of the contest will have their short personal anecdote and logo design forever engraved with the inception of the company on our website. Maybe this is too ambitious ... but nonetheless I don’t have much money but I will also pay $50 to the winner.",6.3275148809523785,7.548513031250002,6.6170357142857155,74.21963095238097,66.00892857142857,9.00904761904762,35.022619047619045,9.21078282632365,3.418639047619049,965,45,156,17,15,311,125,224,0.038,0.812,0.15,0.9769,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,1,2,1,2,5,5,0,2,24,0,18,3,0,3,3,31,31,11,0,5,7,0,2,1,0,5,3,0,0,2,11,7,0,0,4,0,4,0,2,2,0,2,3,2,15,3,25,22,3,16,0,0,0,0,12,10,0,1,5,113,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682946292149508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785097276441356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17868380349870247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16194462990606784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038218387976053,0.11330128121478865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685805291721307,0.0,0.0,0.10630380636794708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748217728317634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31759293333027355,0.0,0.1593313744003324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4794835279268632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658658316107387,0.1175972016915068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746900747203644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995075652771323,0.2769604727126267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13544043676857176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12209523695847767,0.0,0.0,0.2245106594978891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315987299635572,0.0,0.0,0.17997328566804502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13862022122090556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518156110051784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354425042613486,0.12588641956111732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266231367780476,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Toomuchmeow,2020/01/10,"Why can’t I do it I want to die. I don’t remember a time before feeling this way, it’s a thought that has consumed me every single day. But I’m still here. I try to give myself pep talks and say it’s time. I’ve tried for long enough, I’ve gotten help and it’s not getting better. But I won’t do it. It’s torture. I have BPD, depression, anxiety and I’m sure a slew of other things. I can’t hold meaningful relationships because I destroy them, I’ve spent the last two decades feeling like a husk with a happy mask on. It hurts, and I’m tired of waiting. But when I think I’m ready to do it I just can’t. What does it mean? If I’m not willing to kill myself why do I say it so much? My inner monologue is so negative, I spend hours a day whispering words like I’m worthless, pathetic, and ugly. I deserve to die, I deserve to be unloved. So why can’t I do it? I feel pathetic, I feel like a loser. I tell people I want it and then nothing happens, it’s so embarrassing. I feel like I can’t do the one thing I’m clearly meant to do. It’s bad when I have a episode, but the suicidal thoughts don’t stop when my episodes stop. They hang out and mock me. Reddit, what’s wrong with me? How do a pick a side?",-0.8488089622641508,1.1504005849056609,1.8442158018867936,96.59028596698114,90.32075471698113,4.972877358490567,20.734080188679247,6.4784943948869325,0.16388915094339662,925,33,224,11,32,319,131,265,0.235,0.6659999999999999,0.099,-0.9896,0,0,0,0,0,2,37.0,0,0,2,2,11,19,4,1,13,0,22,1,0,2,2,41,47,21,4,3,8,0,5,4,0,2,1,3,0,0,21,10,0,4,12,0,2,1,11,12,0,2,5,8,31,7,14,39,3,20,0,4,0,0,9,4,0,1,18,133,52,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931904001071704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748749592832086,0.0711741863705772,0.0,0.09935189062621724,0.0,0.0,0.10326237267480563,0.0,0.0,0.14705177337343425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15059764112164692,0.0,0.10056291965173136,0.0,0.2423513556751651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217512874430464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064153598154068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837308858381784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951800781370482,0.2502343856378638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061000887405156724,0.11200427266218048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324812379524156,0.12429035185602838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825997903478134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498245383122492,0.0,0.12499113959162275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12917468970167947,0.0,0.0,0.0951728096230536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281669406554363,0.0,0.0,0.10332656538621804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718296400076662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583007387657887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203180978125683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791177904066687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094483344212315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253536802118091,0.13226329757706545,0.0,0.0,0.18570023467249705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324255679315978,0.19522871653090032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12771357159781035,0.0,0.11004240439475507,0.0,0.0,0.09384512141294746,0.10205105515220624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15513676770758236,0.0748133844017536,0.0,0.1853845606401356,0.1361642793828831,0.13419537835247342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15854112963289935,0.0,0.11405494863852532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773299992352905,0.09267653616763888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3160659972232982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276558145401881,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bagofstalechip,2020/01/10,"I just want a hug This past month had taken everything from me. I lost my baby, I was cheated on, I lost my self worth and things are just too hard. 

I called out of work today so I can cry. I woke up and just started sobbing. I fell apart. I'm still currently in bed, I can't find the strength to get up. Last night was rough and left me feeling unheard and like what I've been through or felt doesn't matter or wasn't valid. I fought so hard to get myself to an ok place in my head just to be kicked down. 

I feel so much and yet I feel nothing at all. I just want a hug. I want someone to hold me and tell me it's ok. That i can do it. Or they don't even have to say anything. I feel totally alone with myself now and honestly I just want a hug.",-0.13520209580838485,1.4334390538922153,1.8351160179640715,100.49602732035929,83.61077844311376,5.1330838323353305,18.820733532934128,5.985473137389443,-0.4966164670658686,570,14,149,4,16,189,100,167,0.135,0.6890000000000001,0.177,0.6235,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,4,14,13,2,0,5,2,14,4,1,0,2,32,32,13,0,4,9,0,8,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,6,9,0,1,6,0,1,1,4,5,0,0,11,9,27,8,18,20,3,22,0,3,0,3,6,11,1,3,11,97,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16364527472361107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300244507134071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16134052112614386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17356080433751134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043606506805883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14200448583544792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195678071143012,0.0,0.1517093435181463,0.0,0.14441348382356334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16510192645048322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830824508586418,0.0,0.1621584632848216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287949641626272,0.0,0.0,0.1716726289216138,0.0,0.0,0.07719314229874034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449617104936568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611788820695405,0.0,0.1161516753870415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14827675928962306,0.0,0.1516098240978702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083341752040313,0.0,0.0,0.16508133966415892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256517232409322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16483341930818202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338769163994249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118365790294305,0.0,0.1261828016654221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810312045156775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497133853850188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497700329892907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37278119369221785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502934366751967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowGlitterNotShade,2020/01/10,"I did it! I asked a question in class!!! May not seem like a big deal to many but WOW! I feel like I’m on top of a mountain. I’m always afraid of sounding stupid or embarrassing myself by slurring my words (I didn’t but my voice was a bit shaky, i was super nervous). I constantly have to recite what i have to say in my head and even then i cant seem to find the courage to speak. Sometimes, i practice a bit too much. To the point where the conversation has drifted away to a different topic and its to late to ask what i wanted to ask. Weird, but i even feel smarter! Guys, im so proud of myself.",0.031194196428572237,2.047865445312503,2.0804017857142867,96.4315625,85.953125,4.9071428571428575,20.080357142857142,6.1826913282559595,-0.10764241071428547,459,14,109,4,14,153,79,128,0.11800000000000001,0.677,0.205,0.953,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,3,5,12,1,4,9,0,9,1,1,0,0,17,19,8,0,1,5,0,2,2,0,1,0,4,0,1,4,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,4,6,16,6,18,14,3,12,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,6,5,70,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13856070271077522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4670303426960778,0.0,0.15645409622578796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636005690760857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17995249921243642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716781820460925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17398137720308848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21997410207788906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839834018983374,0.11896425922380632,0.0,0.0,0.15219925433991666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648842206331672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709009196607277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987370995327714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878455047446072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270971916136778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688284615629877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241376577991872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741831769261155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865441759618042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242599013233594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30319306641049704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469577459799056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821974065319594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ElijahWolf101,2020/01/10,"I think I'm manic but I don't want to tell my doctor. I feel amazing. 
Ok so I went through a period of depression for months and months and anything I did to try and tackle my depression and improve my mood only worked in the very short term.

On NYE I took MDMA for the first time. I had two days of a comedown where my mood was very low and then suddenly my mood shot up. Its been like this the past few days. I started taking my antidepressants again and I'm very elated. I'm usually so self conscious and awkward and now I'm being very social and confident. I can't stop talking. I can't stop thinking. Sometimes I feel on top of the world. I have no fear & I feel like I would do something reckless and stupid just for the adrenaline. Like I don't even care if I get arrested. I'd get a surge of adrenaline if that happened. 

Yesterday I was in the park with a friend and I could feel my eyes were open really wide. I couldn't stop talking. I felt like I was on coke. Just this mad buzz of energy.

I feel like I'm taking in and retaining so much information when I read things online, news, physics stuff etc & it makes me feel like a genius.

I feel invincible. Like I could do absolutely anything despite the consequence.

The thing is I've felt depressed for so long that I feel like I deserve to be this happy right now. But I'm also thinking of the manic/psychotic episode I had last year which landed me in hospital for 2 months.

I'm wondering if I should just ride the wave until its over or whether I need to act now before things get worse. What do you guys think?

My theory is that the combination of the MDMA & starting to take my antidepressants again have caused a surge of serotonin/dopamine which would possibly explain why my mood is so high right now. I want to do the right thing but honestly I just want to enjoy this elation for a while because I've never felt this happy & carefree.",2.8354968287526425,4.64869075968992,3.9851867512332646,87.37832980972517,75.51162790697674,7.378247592201082,25.163965233732675,8.199878495009871,1.4753607235142114,1512,52,314,26,33,492,185,387,0.131,0.65,0.22,0.9919,0,0,1,0,0,0,39.0,0,1,0,3,19,28,2,2,20,1,29,3,1,2,1,63,70,30,0,13,12,0,11,8,1,3,1,0,0,2,19,14,1,4,19,1,0,4,7,8,0,2,13,12,45,16,33,49,4,57,0,4,1,0,10,21,0,5,40,194,64,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059607487024114635,0.0,0.3230447240970075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226757661487187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04543727303894319,0.0,0.0634257897633631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599578980663893,0.07657038448901737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902400796420445,0.0,0.0,0.09614084104927376,0.0,0.19259671536046954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762921299465546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312884155697241,0.04923121269798171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387523455452173,0.3015065655660604,0.2129979736335058,0.21470261761415832,0.0,0.0,0.06340142668315317,0.0,0.0,0.05758736703489928,0.0,0.11682805738928992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738036892511842,0.06591312708819874,0.15869277729385536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875279626323717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06075788368286445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913214498032436,0.0,0.0,0.06596320383889387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04975425587599902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17848499043016414,0.0,0.05479352417711597,0.05526849607679512,0.05748779473274835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05668900885238296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115432887284283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402965585753022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455751480996936,0.0,0.04775053116965978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909634533945851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775870572648838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598143544401162,0.0,0.05738248893487365,0.07371933907766616,0.0,0.10551583137334072,0.0,0.0,0.18694967130085832,0.0,0.0,0.08532742591501387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16812841908172896,0.1198205872789744,0.06514892397533481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19807719714580446,0.19104208125855807,0.0,0.0,0.04346332466842662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828137317087042,0.05060596377966095,0.0,0.0728121543356856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209235380002161,0.2460044597508229,0.1318921699662426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06909686459575083,0.06725835936916613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083256995935356,0.05426407412826007,0.0,0.07595992138454415,0.10589838111690582,0.0,0.0,0.04799960569848822
mentalhealth,xfilesqueen,2020/01/10,"I have finally been diagnosed with BPD. Don't know how to feel I am 32. I have left a trail of desctruction, broken hearts, and started projects I never finished.

I have always thought I am not good enough and that I am not really good anything.

I have hurt men that have  loved me. I have pushed them away only to plead for them to come back.

I binge drink and I have been incarcerated twice.

I am always angry and trivial things set me off.

I have ruined date nights, and birthdays and celebrations.

I have quit school every single time I have tried to go back.

I am incredibly ashamed and I feel guilty of the years of damage that I have caused.

I guess I just wanted to vent. I know I can fix this now that I am diagnosed, but I just hope I can move past all my guilt. This is weighing so heavily on me right now.",2.1963636363636354,4.137960757575762,3.360606060606063,90.5609090909091,77.78787878787878,6.581818181818183,21.303030303030305,7.554174236665415,0.6012303030303028,635,17,139,9,15,205,96,165,0.142,0.8170000000000001,0.040999999999999995,-0.8574,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,1,9,9,0,2,2,0,23,6,1,2,2,26,35,10,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,9,2,0,5,1,0,4,4,5,0,1,3,2,31,4,13,32,3,23,0,3,0,1,4,5,0,2,13,99,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26061322198707465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288712912752047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14713409109792142,0.2408367644026053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19723655607706292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608748758181958,0.0,0.1349000007467849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178983992089645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15341175597261006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16181322081998673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194515617069935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836681380634768,0.0,0.0,0.17155141864059806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890013463887617,0.26270307835019063,0.0,0.0,0.172516349651413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18557583564780414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554255573997974,0.0,0.0,0.16764722619559227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17213031503304616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17015010057224725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14134072279110374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16644467775999414,0.0,0.0,0.12078223062885793,0.0,0.0,0.14696172397509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910397629897998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494957077430832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16656703983420945,0.0,0.0,0.10032417655253813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373848586361348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15849104640672032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084472399034777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040403698698226,0.0,0.0,0.1243256420909147,0.09131672780984866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632345903762283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236876897122456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084748375756457
mentalhealth,101-681,2020/01/10,"how can i distract myself from killing myself not gonna get into detail why i'm feeling suicidal. advice on the internet sites either doesn't work or feels like too much work to do which i don't want to do anything right now. i don't want to talk to a close one about it, i've been out of a psychiatric hospital 3 months ago, i neither continue going to the sessions nor take my pills anymore. i stopped a month ago or so, whatever, i just don't know how to distract myself, i this is me desperately trying. i don't even know why i'm forcing myself to live any further",5.000351089588378,4.917008211864406,6.184285714285719,80.74872881355934,68.57627118644068,9.115738498789346,32.111380145278446,8.841846274778883,2.5203786924939457,451,18,92,7,7,152,78,118,0.182,0.782,0.036000000000000004,-0.9354,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,2,8,4,1,2,5,0,10,1,0,2,0,17,22,6,2,2,5,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,8,3,0,1,1,2,14,1,13,20,3,15,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,2,8,60,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18858291531924254,0.3421394921722077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312365616820378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913894733055987,0.0,0.0,0.1588103858005809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746491222265896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951582431566265,0.13786867377894227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082680792789067,0.0,0.10967794313930243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135095435774776,0.0,0.2121192506715664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428282636350363,0.0,0.17040947755959893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30807790954098896,0.0,0.14186633574217347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13077177392566822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16480831631484136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613442782637756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110944988021401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451008618716229,0.15511420299228226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310242908434792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276553558374609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3482782732094785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809910650803891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon6466,2020/01/10,This sub doesn’t get much traffic? So many posts go without comments or replies. How can we increase traffic to this sub,2.267246376811592,5.137618043478263,1.7652173913043503,96.06202898550728,85.95652173913044,3.066666666666667,33.7536231884058,3.1291,1.2312144927536233,97,6,18,0,3,28,20,23,0.0,0.9009999999999999,0.099,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,4,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608810677532383,0.0,0.2837826516894549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5062456465408521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36706746853601263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4782233237503728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4813395336040621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anotherpine,2020/01/10,"How do I go to therapy with social anxiety? Hey guys, I am pretty sure that I have a social anxiety disorder and something else and I’d really like to talk to a therapist about it. My feelings are getting worse and I even harmed myself a few times. I think it needs to stop or I will do some very bad things. But how do I go to therapy with social anxiety? I really can’t open up to people and tell them what I feel, not even when I am close to them. So how am I supposed to tell a stranger about the weird thoughts and feelings I have? I even feel uncomfortable when I confront myself about it. 
Does anyone have some advice for me?",2.3770909090909105,4.039090723076928,4.086783216783221,86.81185314685318,76.38461538461539,7.804195804195802,24.125874125874127,8.575989854853784,1.5446153846153847,494,16,105,10,11,166,73,130,0.205,0.731,0.063,-0.9399,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,0,12,6,1,0,5,0,12,0,0,3,1,26,22,13,0,1,3,0,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,9,0,1,6,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,1,4,20,2,15,20,3,9,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,3,5,78,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381294222410235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32440610350770954,0.0,0.0,0.09883795293434347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802462532451327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16200384754626668,0.0,0.1236997747526222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808306850605838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.280088808440254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28589117234892336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738515930878978,0.0,0.16066938930039787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996261211813446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905838904226884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481214634707424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799701539145143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380776218920915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18110989139819306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43227758470320493,0.0,0.10882115951996256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181782130196828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322440406151118,0.0,0.0,0.11361493274419936,0.24709912658268116,0.0,0.3233010710276657,0.16412280498575588,0.0939092686112593,0.0905738892890224,0.0,0.1122192292567914,0.08242461201672151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663179418528585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14405172859429044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bloodysher,2020/01/10,"I hear voices of different people in my head This mostly happens when I'm laying in bed. But I've had similar experiences when I've been in some really anxious situations as well. Sometimes, when I'm in a really quiet place and alone I hear people's voices inside my head. They aren't trying to tell me anything and I can't understand them because they don't say sentences with meaning or anything. But it is still troubling me.. I've never heard anyone's voice except my own consciousness so these other voices are creeping me out. Please help, what is the meaning of this?",5.196148648648649,6.645616036036035,6.192421171171169,75.37890202702704,68.81981981981983,8.432882882882884,29.190315315315317,8.841846274778883,2.5280531531531527,464,17,78,8,8,154,74,111,0.084,0.8490000000000001,0.067,-0.2122,1,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,3,0,6,2,0,0,2,0,8,2,2,0,1,15,17,10,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,6,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,3,9,12,1,11,14,3,11,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,3,5,54,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17184778534822104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18744750398214102,0.0,0.1160182977445905,0.0,0.27308352085272924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011460607825272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17335583121185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16230604055594436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14672652456751512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34057289876573205,0.0,0.3740180358551307,0.0,0.11121572300211886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614809374945353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797123575854571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300623712293835,0.0,0.17335583121185,0.18213532097465265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21259102076591974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194985556785108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865061372387808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641036147747387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250755362084374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502536317876535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265187248426932,0.0,0.0,0.1727332999254533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491860900464046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WitheredViolet,2020/01/10,"I had a good day today. So to preface this, I just wanted to mention that I suffer from depression, anxiety and binge-eating disorder. Also, as a side-effect of my anxiety, I deal with insomnia.

So I had a terrible night, because I could not sleep at all. Finally fell asleep at some point after 7am. Woke up at 2pm (I've been jobless since October, so waking up late isn't a problem at the moment), tired and not in the mood for doing anything productive.

Despite not really feeling like doing anything, I went shopping because my fridge and freezer was completely empty. At the store the had a deal on cakes, and danish. So as usual, I started craving cakes and treats immediately. But then I experienced something new. Despite the fact that I really, really wanted to buy all the sugary stuff, I just walked past it. Usually it's the other way around, where I know I shouldn't buy it but I can't help myself. That boosted my mood quite a bit, so I decided to actually buy ingredients to make a decent meal, instead of something that just needs to be heated. More often than not, I end up buying something that can be heated or ordering takeaway, so this is kinda a big thing for me. 

After I got home and put the stuff away, I played a few hours on my Switch before I actually managed to clean my apartment a bit. Dusted the worst places, cleaned the tables, took out the trash. Then I made dinner, that turned out pretty well, and I didn't overeat, so now I've put the rest in a container to be heated for dinner tomorrow. Finally I managed to clean up after dinner.

So now I've got the evening off - **With a clean conscience!**

Reading back what I've just written, it kinda sounds pretty sad that this is enough to be considered a good day, but beggars can't be choosers.

TL;DR: Didn't stuff myself, cleaned my apartment, made dinner and cleaned up after myself.",3.930896551724139,5.727170288888887,5.181379310344827,80.02500000000002,72.5,7.743295019157088,28.24712643678161,8.433251757073789,2.1908362068965515,1464,57,265,25,29,486,184,360,0.08199999999999999,0.813,0.106,0.9082,1,0,3,0,0,0,59.0,0,0,0,1,22,14,0,0,26,0,22,11,3,3,3,45,38,25,0,6,12,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,7,0,20,13,6,1,3,3,7,6,10,6,1,0,15,3,32,6,44,16,10,58,0,3,0,0,4,25,0,5,26,191,52,3,0.0,0.0,0.19225128511988376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877357054314446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507104991318324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16212071001652698,0.08768939656308432,0.0,0.0,0.09254770042418624,0.07574345468389385,0.0,0.1200941831878701,0.0,0.08381960343601894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21508159487466785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032795139407907,0.0,0.0,0.07864738605657826,0.0,0.0,0.12705379311508885,0.2031064873934803,0.08484130490569701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11289405683636385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724525920670682,0.10178090864852184,0.0,0.06506092774587345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049806555135915066,0.07037123916487993,0.0,0.21581251742844415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16524087391469566,0.15756520927683468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602511906175572,0.0,0.09880749000536404,0.0,0.09700654533584067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541351929750841,0.0,0.11111674234495683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04812405270398954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864136320817105,0.06575214928091297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303942829795196,0.0,0.09513572548624173,0.0,0.09243928108555613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403316302610457,0.0,0.0,0.10291565874722554,0.0,0.09311806886839354,0.0,0.0,0.20042785309111014,0.0,0.09425497369025047,0.0,0.198047346700776,0.0,0.10477107234692863,0.0985306032114494,0.0,0.18931245167460656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148348257606293,0.0,0.09857508501675838,0.0,0.0,0.22749945178315195,0.0,0.0,0.06972160043203772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382903561357332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544164517471167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321579615197212,0.09337022365486077,0.0,0.10944150915232356,0.0,0.10714400782892414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169763613924077,0.0,0.1162003597604108,0.07818784786512646,0.0,0.0,0.08856687788186221,0.09131414540830199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the_ugly_duckling5,2020/01/10,What should I do? I feel lonely even when I am around people It is very suffocating. My mom died in 2016 and everything has changed. I feel like I have no one to talk to or spend time with. Dad and brother are busy with their girlfriends and even when we are together it's not the same like before. We don't click anymore. At least they can share their feelings with their gfs but here I am ugly and single as jsbs for 23 years.,0.9536363636363632,3.287345272727272,1.921545454545456,96.95981818181819,84.9090909090909,4.883636363636365,17.89090909090909,6.2581,-0.35182181818181796,336,8,75,3,10,105,66,88,0.115,0.828,0.057999999999999996,-0.7184,0,2,0,0,0,0,7.0,2,0,4,0,6,4,0,0,1,0,11,0,0,0,0,18,14,9,1,1,3,3,3,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,10,0,0,3,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,4,13,3,10,13,3,7,0,1,1,0,12,3,0,1,6,55,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526503182567613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22678758857809864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21677929697180515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26949894456210305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26439736663432273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33652896456017234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22895901026607876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3864381205952386,0.18199832888546028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.248922635874032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983681180498409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17262981986770962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766163077167746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047638883961419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485507551554569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102010634620295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16405504475487973
mentalhealth,zestytaco_,2020/01/10,"I turn 30 this year and I'm going back into therapy It's crazy how age can make you feel as though you've failed. I know people younger than me who are so much more settled within themselves, their relationships and careers yet here I am, waiting to pour my heart out to a stranger in the hope they'll help me fix myself.
I know age is just a number but I feel so disappointed.",3.125,4.462680217948718,4.003076923076924,89.51692307692308,73.74358974358974,6.7384615384615385,24.538461538461537,7.1686216300943375,0.8143692307692314,299,9,65,3,6,96,64,78,0.124,0.81,0.066,-0.7497,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,2,1,8,3,0,0,3,0,5,1,1,2,0,14,15,8,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,12,1,8,14,2,10,0,2,0,0,6,4,0,1,5,43,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21770465692140956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2863117095346154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16090572906649872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355029597148336,0.1897718549216272,0.0,0.0,0.2812057271907545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31119477354710784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18898727501652124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20812850359159546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962823320180921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.303968908610045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237766370321147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27816760772442445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3079572956228092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182322386760902
mentalhealth,appletime123,2020/01/10,"Please help. My friend is faking a memory loss,she won't go to school and won't stop faking her memory loss and we're worried about her.Why is she doing this ,what should we do?",2.2559649122806995,3.5259670526315823,3.6342105263157904,91.56780701754387,75.84210526315789,7.171929824561403,15.298245614035089,7.793537801064563,-0.15108070175438648,140,1,32,2,3,46,28,38,0.22899999999999998,0.5429999999999999,0.228,-0.0031,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,5,8,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,5,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,18,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117212815852533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293022997069641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704386164845732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4428908331281566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083349623193244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3373204583482618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640705081580166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4097451581383975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TenaciousPuffin,2020/01/10,"People Who Suffer with Anxiety - What Helps You Manage It? I'm having lots of issues with anxiety. It's not so bad I can't function, but it does interfere with my quality of life. I have a stressful job (that I love) but lately have been developing light sensitivity and migraines when things get too stressful. Please note: I'm open to taking medication, but want to try living a more healthy lifestyle first so I can assess what actually might be needed. I'd love to hear from others with anxiety on what's worked for them. 

**Where I'm at:**

\-Mid 30s. Obese. (Doctor wants me to lose 50lbs which would put me at a normal weight) 

\-Recently quit a decade long pot habit. Used to drink 5-6 glasses of wine per week but now at 1-2. Also cut back on caffeine. 

\-Totally out of shape. Have hypertension; doctor is keeping an eye on it to see if I need meds. 

\-Lots of watching tv/couch time to recuperate from job and stress. 

\-I feel like my cognitive function and focus is down. I used to love to read and write but my comprehension is slower/not where it used to be. 

​

**What I'm trying to do:**

\-Joined Weight Watchers and have been following it. (Lost 3lbs already)

\-Not smoking even though I want to. The last few months it made me even more anxious. 

\-Joined a yoga gym. I wanted to go 5x a week....but this week was only 2x. 

\-Still lots of tv/couch time. I want to read more books/novels. I used to read at least 15+ novels per year and over the last few years it's been more like 2-3. 

​

Any other suggestions and/or stories about what you do to manage stress and anxiety would be appreciated. I know I was self-medicating with my smoking and over-eating.....I don't want to live like this anymore.",1.2562175324675309,3.879074351190479,2.5947294372294394,90.06087662337664,88.2261904761905,5.435497835497836,20.433982683982684,6.980632752743323,0.5760261904761901,1346,43,271,20,44,433,189,336,0.099,0.778,0.12300000000000001,0.8459,3,0,2,0,0,0,93.0,0,2,1,5,14,15,1,4,9,0,24,14,1,5,1,49,54,19,0,12,8,0,3,3,0,3,6,1,0,0,21,15,5,2,2,8,0,3,4,9,0,1,7,8,23,6,42,41,11,35,0,3,3,3,11,15,0,5,20,160,44,10,0.0,0.0,0.07438449686345774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841160613363098,0.060957016826556125,0.0,0.1651792724842182,0.18524316865199414,0.05183553892071708,0.0,0.23324732821361996,0.08611242891153975,0.07559460843376964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058612235167616475,0.06364459905969842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560388092524191,0.06670491472655822,0.0,0.0,0.0746713728765436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069164162577643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03854159457999831,0.05445507649713245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648368523167084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03982435884948346,0.0,0.043320361471491035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591099065068702,0.0,0.05109193687517925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955898109369286,0.15128288284821734,0.06775218436835535,0.0,0.0,0.041891205976041054,0.12426691756033875,0.08598499580673265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05383989389717486,0.11171889265191352,0.0,0.13461594838031565,0.06745662880762465,0.0,0.08527615410441436,0.08320847153864815,0.19441102641732275,0.20638781716426627,0.07212583376096053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693373377728767,0.07678855719929231,0.0,0.08086256234878486,0.0,0.0,0.060841979803295934,0.0,0.0,0.11303957987588695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468420791865235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05797246351112759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052844740972379296,0.0,0.0,0.08367203908569809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662706769576942,0.0,0.08107455299985597,0.22873655198610585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526288282937416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060741368293664735,0.0,0.07951918408275124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060873295450784376,0.0,0.3492614148742121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05731163081823978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064042976048115,0.0,0.07489056720473801,0.0,0.08889469244289802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350339326980547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633353241076311,0.0,0.0,0.2697564895051089,0.0,0.1834290263275606,0.18564276132109891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055492627601892566,0.0,0.0,0.10829594941717244,0.0,0.18524316865199414,0.09817265978842914
mentalhealth,Throwawayact0290,2020/01/10,"Dealt with premature ejaculation most of my life and have tried everything to overcome. I think it may be a part of an underlying issue and wanted feedback. Need help with premature ejaculation. It feels like I’ve tried everything and there has to be another underlying issue.

I know I wrote a bit but any feedback or experience would be appreciated. It’s more than just a “look at the sidebar” question.

25 M.  Ive has PE off and on through my life.

I’ve been with my wife for about 3 years now. In the start, our sex life was good. We were in the college party life so having a few drinks or smokes and it was easier to last a significant time.

I’ve gotten away from substances to focus on work and now I can’t last for more than a minute. Consistently. Even if I just got off and I don’t feel like I’m in a mood, I’ll go again and it can still build up just as quick.

I’ve tried everything. I’m pretty fit, weight lift, I do kegals consistently, I take deep breathes, I stopped watching porn and started masturbating to my thoughts, even tried using a fleshlight to simulate the same. I meditate often to control my thoughts (because I will think about it before we have sex)

I am more girthier than most, and she is tighter than most, so this could be a factor but it doesn’t explain it. I’ve told my girl I want to last longer but she says she doesn’t mind how long I last. But I’m not content with it. I’m not happy with it. And I know even though she loves me unconditionally, she would prefer if I lasted a few more minutes.

I can’t seem to fix it. I feel like there’s an underlying issue that causes it. 

Thanks!",1.6183264795279797,3.8745849118541074,3.2117870552476333,89.27052521008406,81.34042553191489,6.42377972465582,22.442428035043807,7.618777277803332,0.9004742714106921,1272,42,275,21,34,419,168,329,0.02,0.835,0.145,0.9904,0,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,3,0,0,2,20,8,0,0,16,0,28,11,1,4,0,63,58,24,0,9,13,1,4,3,0,4,4,1,0,1,14,18,2,2,13,1,0,1,7,0,0,0,10,7,34,7,40,39,12,32,0,0,2,4,17,15,0,11,19,181,48,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714194069804175,0.10353033651329027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927630624741032,0.0,0.0,0.060186823480064565,0.0,0.08401465486934973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779104899928148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142616197700301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073764460634404,0.07883040154161054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672091761574178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956369810633241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662050181281985,0.09657998479735502,0.0,0.0,0.1497673707023406,0.2116049872156252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05611233531082475,0.08281269788427106,0.07896593478227787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510329445123562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617876204717814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091553305981595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10852233529257924,0.4024035528176044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27895262891060274,0.14470811766341524,0.0,0.0,0.08737574770889821,0.082910995466624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911053992021625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969235513635236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320939385010411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691840066682158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044712819780746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060374554816353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851657893387946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988296899738206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976769054288352,0.0,0.07884843638844526,0.08254535035290753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423505567467698,0.0,0.0,0.09090023689498557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652845618748007,0.09700483735288364,0.15676621533940946,0.05757210489796091,0.0,0.0,0.09434377419965767,0.0,0.26813336323546555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527375755645747,0.0,0.0,0.1164707624561492,0.0,0.0,0.12023040110286475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187892301695863,0.0,0.0,0.1402744210825566,0.0,0.0,0.06358092381141729
mentalhealth,orasanekuma,2020/01/10,"Girlfriend has a few mental issues, and it's getting hard for me to help her or cope with things First sorry if this heats really long I'm mostly just.... Venting idk. 

This past November marked our 9th anniversary together and the last year (especially the last half of it) was really hard for us financially and in other ways. Through the years we have been through a lot including a time where some medications she was trying caused her to get really violently angry over the smallest things. I did get hit badly once during that time but once those meds were stopped nothing has escalated that far though we have had other fights. Just a bit of backstory that we have been through some shit.

She basically has no family either, her dad was the only supportive family member and he passed away 2 years ago. Her mother was abusive to her and her sister growing up... GF tried to reconnect with her mom after her dad's death but all her mom wanted was whatever she could get out of situation (mostly monetary gains)... And she just pretty much cut off contact when she didn't get anything she wanted (they had been divorced for years). Her sister had turned to drugs and random sex with random guys a long while back and never stopped despite their dad trying to help her. Even now she is wanted for drugs, theft and other things but no one knows where she is. Her uncle (dad's brother) offered to help during all the funeral stuff and selling her dad's things, dealing with lawyers etc because it was an unexpected death and we never found a will. GF was literally unable to deal with it and all her sister wanted was money, didn't give a shit about anything else (she didn't even go to the funeral). We figured out later that her uncle basically sold a lot of things for cash and didn't report it properly so he essentially stole a large amount of what should have been my GF's inheritance but there's no proof. He stayed in contact with her for part of the following year but then cut her off. Side note, I let him borrow an expensive digital camera for his family's vacation right after he ""helped"" with all of that stuff when we still believed he'd done it all correctly and nicely. I never got my camera back.

So. Suffice to say I'm really her only/main emotional support at this point. She has a boyfriend as well (yes we have a poly relationship, she asked if I was OK with this before getting involved with him). He and I are friends so it kind of like we ""share"" GF with full consent all around. But he lives in another state and can't visit often so at times he doesn't understand her as well as I do. He also hasn't been in the relationship as long and there was a period of time where they broke up but later got back together again (there are still some tensions from that time).

One way my GF tends to cope is sort of 'retail therapy' but with her it is with pets a good bit of the time. She'll get enamored of a type of pet/animal and be super focused on that for a while but then get overwhelmed and stop helping to take care of it as much/at all. Which is really frustrating because then taking care of it falls on me. We have honestly too many dogs at this point, along with a few reptiles, a conure, a cockatiel, and (the latest obsession) poultry. This includes chickens mostly but also turkeys and geese. We live in a suburban area but far enough outside the city that poultry IS allowed here but only a certain amount. We are now way over that amount. We also live in fear of animal control being called because of the animals. Though we could put some poultry outside and legally it would be ok she refuses to do so, saying our neighbors would just come and steal them etc.... So everything is in the house (which is a small 2 bedroom that's falling apart because landlords don't care about it).

We've been trying to plan to move somewhere with land asap (so we won't have close neighbors and can have most of the animals outside or at least in a separate building like a barn or shed with AC and heat) but that was supposed to be last year and it got messed up then. Now it's supposed to be this year but who knows.

She's also been wanting to go to EDC which is planned for this year but we failed to realize this is the 10 year anniversary so.... We didn't pre order tickets yet and now most of them are sold out. We don't have the cash on hand to afford the 3rd party seller tickets at $600 per ticket. And tax returns coming soon were/are SUPPOSED to be used to help us finally move out.

Last night her BF really screwed up without realizing it. For some reason GF started talking about wanting to get a new dog - a Chihuahua. She wants to get this dog apparently to 'start over' and have a dog she can 'do things with' such as go to the dog parks, walks, etc. I left to get dinner and when I came back BF was on the phone and they were talking about this. We really do not need another dog right now, as I said we already have too many... I am the only one seriously taking care of them and a few have their own issues too on top of things. BF was saying no to her asking if she can get another dog etc. I agreed, no, it's not something we should do right now.

Sorry one other backstory. BF actually has a dog that we had gotten a while ago but we didn't really have time to give the dog all the attention/exercise/etc she needed and he wanted to take her rather than have us rehome her to someone random. She's a Shetland sheepdog named Frisk.

So eventually BF starts saying if my GF wants to spend time 'doing things' with a dog why not do stuff with one or more of the ones we have? Which is a fair point and one I kind of agree with but the way he was saying it was NOT the best way (not even a good way) to present it to GF. He was even comparing how Frisk is now that she's with him vs when she was here - not in a mean way but trying to point out that even a dog that might be difficult to train can come around with work.

But like I said bad idea. I had no way to tell him to stop without possibly making it worse so I resign myself to later damage control. GF took his remarks as saying that she's a failure to the dogs (despite a lot of their issues not being our fault, since most were rescues and just don't do super well with other dogs and/or people). Took him talking about Frisk as bragging, and mocking her because she wasn't able to do the same level of interaction and training etc. Basically taking everything in the worst possible light.

So since then (last night) sje basically didn't sleep... Has been really depressed, even saying she'd just get rid of every animal we have...

And I.... I'm tired. I don't know how to handle this anymore or what to do. I know the root problem and cause is not about getting a new dog or not but she won't tell me what exactly brought that on. And now is just completely focused on it when I know it's a bad idea and will just be the same as before where eventually the dog will just get shoved to the wayside for the next new thing. I'd be willing to try... Maybe hope it would be different and work out but now she's beating herself up for even the idea of it.

Says its stupid, how dare she want something nice, she is so selfish and a failure etc etc. She said she would be willing to rehome 1 or 2 of the current dogs (to have more time etc for a new dog) but is convinced that if we did so they would be put down (not true, the 2 she was talking about would honestly be fine they're not bad dogs at all).... And one of the 2 is a dog the BF has said he really likes... So GF also said if we rehome that dog she is SURE the BF will break up with her over it. Which I'm 98%-100% sure would not happen. But she's convinced herself that it would. 

So she's backed herself into a corner more or less of her own making and I don't know how to help...",4.940323809523812,5.246696343492069,5.572079365079368,83.73850000000002,68.73968253968255,8.68888888888889,27.94444444444445,8.573210120120642,1.8004349206349204,6131,187,1274,89,98,1988,507,1575,0.113,0.785,0.102,-0.978,5,0,4,0,2,0,176.0,32,0,10,14,93,67,10,4,85,3,153,11,4,14,19,274,241,131,4,33,63,12,3,4,21,20,4,13,5,1,85,109,1,7,16,3,13,21,41,31,3,10,61,17,142,36,188,140,55,193,0,6,0,2,208,70,3,35,94,905,227,8,0.030816373254754423,0.03651236317623843,0.030072334981355937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05463371107354942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034006634184286184,0.12321921279089056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969409628600756,0.0,0.0,0.030561561662206305,0.0,0.0,0.05071849892698616,0.05486621129452825,0.05761829817717903,0.0,0.028952997085817233,0.11847944425853035,0.10292153786779666,0.09392687554431413,0.0,0.0524449278133158,0.03471949986766175,0.03233988251172151,0.0,0.06728699644698853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03146696257018663,0.035245721427931614,0.12567738534735012,0.06331380818664986,0.0,0.07963673067241145,0.03231038105157355,0.0,0.06912636594922293,0.049208732985615386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354065536648601,0.026542097128645914,0.0,0.0,0.03219655112051458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031535849055881755,0.0,0.0,0.07147441884904226,0.0,0.0257431255836991,0.03466427214115425,0.0,0.03184155130798209,0.3093156190749129,0.1424774672903907,0.0,0.025964123566410684,0.0,0.055391538460310114,0.0,0.08715280235279117,0.034676987373342384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033757830608158866,0.0,0.026212391347942537,0.0,0.033788562677696005,0.02380865353330424,0.0,0.2415042469006201,0.05912374648863435,0.05254096525283184,0.051694623626323793,0.07394000646329656,0.0,0.0,0.030513054465508237,0.027250817096543777,0.0,0.055210834967373563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445889578797485,0.0,0.0,0.030607611937216225,0.0,0.03555795725051365,0.0,0.10436380326831986,0.0,0.09649286199851616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418102118709221,0.10161523693817127,0.12559728604586734,0.0,0.0,0.033482079708781906,0.031511829526152675,0.0,0.060221293508539386,0.0,0.0816342664982353,0.08181456178723326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859693561176828,0.0,0.0,0.04114033688121715,0.06248593131856265,0.030959188936488444,0.033568064603813515,0.03423004363197254,0.031044254007269574,0.031055656152449575,0.032691302152210326,0.0,0.0721835278160995,0.0,0.06550585570175826,0.04530716023919239,0.04569990059110545,0.07130246046965041,0.11905058127367228,0.032773562560563574,0.057838157482424116,0.0,0.029569141260119614,0.0,0.0,0.06563686355738134,0.16705577641143968,0.07031172149760867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03337112920124785,0.02941771521697883,0.021364193071595157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652573383137008,0.06948166119914101,0.0,0.0313513302862519,0.0,0.02948710736268515,0.0,0.061957933320868026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19741757805330845,0.03168436416560546,0.0,0.06617050433972307,0.0,0.07895104314527238,0.14656713921869907,0.1960513351266805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326512860564477,0.05098324480789459,0.034638894693769275,0.030838628470973014,0.0,0.026110613055842398,0.047447899366578866,0.0,0.0689928137701184,0.0654359628021536,0.032846153640637615,0.049219990976758034,0.1030554716273062,0.0,0.0,0.10583212387196468,0.0,0.0699401103579006,0.058088134191617735,0.0,0.11585038771302066,0.09907613407479804,0.0538697370225771,0.0,0.035241208490371385,0.0,0.1842572617164037,0.0,0.06055386051904636,0.0,0.16172347557200753,0.035418887784702605,0.0,0.0,0.06847624913490713,0.12553376760066684,0.03351936495682945,0.0,0.03208093135597319,0.11120490811652403,0.0266154521873192,0.0,0.0,0.1817629537035398,0.1956848216441447,0.0,0.0,0.08312286136101586,0.0,0.027806983682176337,0.0,0.0,0.059411768265478414,0.0,0.04486937350139061,0.0,0.03140451706301565,0.17512853916187934,0.0,0.0,0.1786026061941953
mentalhealth,Princess_Crazy-Locks,2020/01/10,"So am I gonna loose the plot again?! I've always had mental health challenges, but I learned to cope with them, really well, once I knew what the issues were. 

Around s5yrs ago, it all got thrown out the window by a bizarre sequence of incidents that had very little to do with me, personally, but lead to a severe mental health breakdown, due to complex ptsd and the environment that my children and I were in, at the time (NOT domestic / relationship issues ftr).

For 4.5yrs I've been taking Sertraline (Zoloft in U.S.A), for a while I was having to take an anti psychotic too, until we started to settle, in a new county. I've heard really scary things about coming off of the sertraline (zoloft) but I've been off the anti psychotic for a good 2.5 years now and I feel like I'm almost, if not, ready to 'fly solo' again, as it were. 

What experiences do other people have of this kind of situation?! Does anyone have a positive outcome to share?! Not gonna lie, the last hurdle is looking very scary indeed :0(",5.211435368754955,6.160266360824743,5.922783505154643,79.17879857256146,68.38144329896907,8.8558287073751,26.26328310864393,9.057496981413335,1.9758601110229976,790,22,149,14,13,258,125,194,0.132,0.789,0.079,-0.8991,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,1,0,1,2,8,6,0,0,15,0,15,4,0,1,1,23,27,11,0,1,7,0,1,1,0,2,4,1,1,2,9,9,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,11,3,10,6,29,14,1,23,0,0,1,0,7,9,0,2,13,96,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601662435851491,0.0,0.15364948946877932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276756131264113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072898587649861,0.0,0.0,0.13659545919507904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321762585549348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427768350570388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009522210269902,0.0,0.0,0.07758462865941798,0.10961863240714954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286994433468143,0.12272117814640447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262022610898861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203061041942022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15978570150576926,0.0,0.12507529538714035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496376226857254,0.1537886853185207,0.0,0.0,0.12885220789203947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30926586783814525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481947489432363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341018098764534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637701033451533,0.13397919213305884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793648927234198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965970974931258,0.0,0.0,0.1647387383272053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733452103595511,0.0,0.0,0.17247466573939546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10860667766117693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23073781162164805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193970905809996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947296781740624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532106008702691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796232871832112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881128994784036
mentalhealth,Diplomaticspouse,2020/01/10,"Looking for advice on how to to communicate with a friend with mental health issues I have a friend who is convinced that paranormal events are happening to him, and/or that somebody has hacked his phone to surveil him. He sees things like shadows following him, takes a video and asks what I think.

I’m sure he doesn’t want me to make a medical diagnosis on him. I don’t want to either. He’s already had a psychotic break before, been to a hospital for it, and had therapy and drugs. He’s not violent and doesn’t seem to do stupid things; I’m just sad for him that he sees these as real things and therefore does not seek help. 

Ideally I’d like to encourage him to seek help for his illness but I don’t think I can be that blunt; he would dismiss my opinion and maybe put me out of his life too, like he’s done to pretty much all his friends and family. 

Anything I can do to help? So far I just try to listen and not give my opinion.",6.249531249999998,5.228244890625003,6.586541666666665,82.03762500000002,66.23958333333334,10.388333333333334,32.22083333333333,9.642632912329526,2.609198333333333,737,25,160,13,10,239,107,192,0.08199999999999999,0.7659999999999999,0.152,0.9129,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,5,13,2,0,6,0,18,5,0,3,2,33,35,12,0,4,7,0,0,3,3,1,5,1,0,0,11,11,0,0,3,1,0,2,7,3,0,0,4,4,21,10,24,29,3,8,0,1,3,0,29,4,0,3,4,100,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430673191178124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615638703548203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048056477487415,0.0,0.13687087064124473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458165474538152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812183575527114,0.14982528999438552,0.0,0.0,0.1697857494222223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801957959222824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33934127605210473,0.0,0.0,0.14044702661274985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12946731089557062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15562389604591725,0.0,0.0,0.2944007696392785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15281096978127834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341166121345226,0.21458133443067476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294508651950845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772787301164244,0.0,0.1470856057238526,0.0,0.0,0.14748974575114634,0.14754391679011614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762606089391198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489486502654151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717956873148633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664332709340865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333349991967793,0.1332835209349513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379869547046284,0.0,0.11007991511062866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674292730303932,0.0,0.2917991058505389,0.1876235100736632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940080732422728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17270939622150272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10400339990738212,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,doctorholmes108,2020/01/10,"I'm being send impatient any tips? Possible trigger warning i guess?

I've been in therapy for 1.5 years, i swallowed some blades and had to go to some heavier therapy. Now after i had a day with some ""friends"" and it was not so fun. I'm not going in great detail but they where making fun of my of my muscle diseas if thats how you call it. And leaving me behind because i can't walk fast. 

Now that evening i took an overdose of my medication and had an some sort of weird attack. My mom told my therapist and now i have to go inpatient next monday so i have 2 days left because there wasnt any room left.

Now this is my first time and don't know what stuff to take or do anyone tips?",1.9899425287356325,3.4452161724137973,3.689396551724141,90.13317528735635,76.93103448275863,6.764367816091952,23.80747126436781,7.492282038375204,0.9164367816091956,535,17,119,7,12,179,94,145,0.14,0.86,0.0,-0.9575,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,1,10,6,1,0,3,0,13,2,0,3,0,22,24,12,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,7,7,1,0,1,0,0,6,5,2,0,1,8,0,16,4,14,15,4,25,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,8,13,79,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22164127389526175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394773327597922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18539428775516276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19868183864128064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16640375674349514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101957026758344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763572726945576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386165056064532,0.0,0.0,0.1259050466694796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778474084207997,0.0,0.0,0.17966762117753893,0.17952245520529267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956037161820346,0.0,0.0,0.17255461197204344,0.3541202195603854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877927279218322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16416838710080567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19086065547009512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17331332567550692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18371664285243455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18655399778055126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252812576134672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37272548768559305,0.18921295971645152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502521477449537,0.0,0.0,0.1557184233900833,0.18105823017293649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494302668712643
mentalhealth,thatNVGboi,2020/01/10,"Is this normal? I don't want to ask someone I know because I'm scared they'll think I'm crazy or something.

I already know that I have depression, ADD, and anxiety, as I have been diagnosed (althoughI'm only taking meds for ADD), so if this is a symptom of that just let me know.


So the first thing. I feel like I'm just watching my life sometimes.
Every time I speak to my mom I feel like it's not me. ""I"" get really annoyed and start being an asshole without me wanting to. It feels like I can't control what i do or say even if i try. It's not just with her tho, it happens at night and when I'm alone sometimes. Then I just talk quietly to some ""thing"" that isn't there. It's like a one sided conversation where I talk about how I feel and ask when and how it's gonna kill me and why it hasn't yet.



The other thing is the voices (I don't know how else to describe it).

Whenever I do anything I hear voices (mainly my own and my boyfriend's, but it isn't uncommon for me to hear my mom and dad) in my head that keep saying negative things like ""you're a failure,"" ""fuck you,"" ""shut the fuck up you stupid cunt,"" ""they dont actually care,"" ""you're not worth shit,"" ""just kill yourself, pussy,"" ""no one would care if you died,"" and things more stuff like that. It happens when I do the dishes, watch tv, play games, when I work, when I try to sleep, basically whenever I do anything. It's especially bad after I talk to my mom like an asshole. Then it's so bad I cant even think. Stuff like ""how could you say that,"" and ""what is wrong with you,"" as well as the stuff previously mentioned.


I just want to know if this is normal or if I should get help.",2.9424807877041315,3.554115576368879,4.229153458213259,90.49350924591741,73.35158501440922,7.397166186359272,25.12115754082613,7.492282038375204,0.91669846301633,1263,37,296,14,24,417,157,347,0.16899999999999998,0.737,0.09300000000000001,-0.9826,0,1,1,0,0,1,67.0,0,5,2,3,26,25,8,1,11,0,26,9,3,5,0,59,60,37,3,13,19,4,4,8,0,4,3,9,0,0,32,14,1,2,11,3,1,0,14,13,1,3,1,15,46,12,23,52,4,19,0,1,2,2,27,6,4,9,21,195,78,1,0.0,0.0,0.07765106835027212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241288593819686,0.0878099913772523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060872577584549885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130962415430803,0.0,0.1487786835560434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287906271066433,0.048506524267841744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16225848850348482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924707992340616,0.06353199195980792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853548949803284,0.08076419078684664,0.08258346540271387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325812134966546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647243074037233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10511348299547824,0.0,0.06704307912771731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093654571885244,0.1705393615094314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768414203436733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14712658415909532,0.08314646576701347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073101156104997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166411747101372,0.0,0.1793674888814993,0.0,0.05333562300925284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072749996447099,0.17606987983485195,0.0,0.2186542247164756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136804906883473,0.05620425568859033,0.31099997930141066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838686651192824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795822833022483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467319585768684,0.15592788224198334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784047464617247,0.06051830578083401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050976041123732635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898372162511101,0.07966573532530749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167980352359347,0.0,0.0,0.07962974769710418,0.0,0.06742133593296741,0.06125862988483052,0.157398042215926,0.0,0.05632167043525872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732736746092821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270606820978653,0.059828452830726436,0.19187155728909705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264321440517134,0.1019734100548343,0.0,0.0,0.046399237273398564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804871181735592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080137990945452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154503735760356,0.0,0.07180160741951865,0.0,0.0,0.07670483986782824,0.0,0.0579295686675221,0.0,0.0,0.05652586577070494,0.08699979840562698,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThinkingSmash,2020/01/10,Nothing I've done seems to get me out of depression. Can someone advice me? My dad won't let me take antidepressants and most likely won't let me do those therapies where you use electricity on your brain. Talk therapy hasn't helped nor has exercise.,4.489374999999999,6.600459187500004,5.315000000000001,78.33000000000001,71.70833333333334,9.8,28.66666666666667,10.125756701596842,3.123066666666668,203,8,38,6,4,66,40,48,0.079,0.9209999999999999,0.0,-0.5719,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,9,2,1,1,0,5,13,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,7,1,4,8,1,3,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,2,1,25,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254347607163959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25753451627469337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19869927213589514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23608346481515716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052983315346352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15463155729203956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4718072999408378,0.0,0.1127070623812398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22136030991040884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21001818468875305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954690989212941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17345568139297074,0.1854257750554116,0.0,0.0,0.5276450042576845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992484222914093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chickadee_Cortana_,2020/01/10,"Wanting to kill myself after my baby is born.. I have been extremely depressed during my pregnancy and have had suicidal thoughts/ideation on and off for months. I feel like a useless wife to my husband and like I'd just be useless as a mother. My husband's family hate me but love this baby inside me. I honestly think that the only reason I haven't offed myself yet is because of the guilt of being pregnant. 

I want my son to be born before leaving, because he deserves to live. My husband would be the better parent anyway. I haven't been able to work because the further along I got the more slow I got. I look in the mirror and all I see is a shattered girl who never properly turned into a woman. 

I'm not ready for this baby. Not mentally, emotionally, and probably not physically. If I died during labor it would be best, but I know it wouldn't happen..",4.465627450980391,5.59549875882353,5.89970588235294,77.9970098039216,70.23529411764707,8.019607843137255,29.46078431372549,8.344100000000001,2.2688431372549016,679,26,122,10,12,230,103,170,0.129,0.715,0.156,0.8305,1,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,0,3,3,12,2,1,10,0,18,1,0,1,2,25,32,9,3,6,7,7,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,2,6,7,0,0,4,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,5,3,22,6,17,19,3,12,0,3,2,1,12,5,0,1,9,91,28,2,0.16771448044654252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3067115718320548,0.0,0.14271267010483873,0.0,0.17600600006747366,0.14832982878227835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444522362541715,0.0,0.17406115200188985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18865621675043448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810628595848225,0.0,0.08480148057006734,0.11981525834194773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682731820449281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830936117330007,0.0,0.0,0.16558332740482748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18555122364652865,0.0,0.09217149234083638,0.0,0.0,0.17758541873361908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16387364712109947,0.0,0.14809495890601826,0.0,0.14083792360383554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15136886661350055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16901674942332726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386809820295342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935174659012993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755441988352836,0.0,0.0,0.1862270828652676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18082457620542727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724384187063195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364672684891135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18345242044683746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746466705623538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824251943004153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978446917994476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12209813923490455,0.0,0.0,0.2382791098914037,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flowerthorns,2020/01/10,Just experienced hypnotherapy I just experienced hypnotherapy idk what I'm supposed to feel. It's pretty expensive for me $150 and I feel guilty about it spending my parents money for something like that. Idk what to feel in the outcome of hypnotherapy but it felt weird and idk if I was in subconscious when I was experiencing I was confused and idk if I should go back or not.,3.795773809523809,6.393686236111115,5.301984126984127,75.37000000000002,75.5277777777778,8.55873015873016,29.73015873015873,9.23628265651192,2.9733825396825395,307,14,56,8,7,103,46,72,0.17800000000000002,0.768,0.055,-0.6858,1,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,16,10,8,0,3,7,1,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,0,3,1,1,2,0,0,4,7,8,1,8,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,3,39,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858441489451967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5638868371188122,0.0,0.35692749174917543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126769558275166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18161277362347147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41277188415750665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3781919462931741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861826475165244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Positivity2020,2020/01/10,today is the last day i will take others for granted i failed so many people with my arrogance. how could i be so arrogant. i have been lying to myself about what i could handle and now im paying the price. all this lying. its let people down. will they forgive me? i dont know. i dont deserve their forgiveness. what i did is to assume wrongly of others. what i will do is  make it right.,-0.5524074074074079,1.6657119382716097,1.9017592592592607,93.4504166666667,96.28395061728395,4.181481481481482,15.391975308641975,5.985473137389443,-0.4522024691358024,301,7,63,3,12,102,56,81,0.23,0.722,0.049,-0.9462,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,1,5,4,0,0,2,0,16,0,0,2,1,11,19,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,4,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,14,2,7,10,1,6,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,4,53,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37202783516282856,0.0,0.0,0.15025148950223385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5460967919755636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251656140993124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803857609554947,0.18990810612266454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23823571568204385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551457575896865,0.2362030512284621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230351206461508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198961877178513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17517040707489134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208358339462036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547247903144902,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tunginma,2020/01/10,"Struggling very hard with depression right now. Background on my health: I’ve struggled with depression off and on since I was about 14. Growing up, my father had depression for years on end so if I had to guess, I’d say it runs in the family.

Recently I’ve been spending time with a new girl. She’s been staying in my room about a week and I’ve been on cloud 9 with her the whole time. There’s no red flags or anything and she’s a legitimately caring and genuine person that shares my interests and talks openly about things like mental health.

When she went to work this morning, this wave of very intense depression washed over me. It wasn’t because she was gone or anything like that, it just feels like anytime I’m happy for too long, I get these depressive episodes. This one is bad enough to where my coworkers saw me this morning and immediately asked if I was okay.

It just feels as if I’m totally fine as long as I’m distracted but the moment I’m left with my own thoughts, my room gets darker and these thoughts creep in. I’ve always managed my depression well and I’m not actively suicidal but frankly if I died in a car accident or something, I wouldn’t be upset. 

tldr: I have major depressive episodes following periods of happiness. Does anybody else experience this?",3.655476451259585,5.836492453815263,4.320476451259584,84.24584063526835,74.26104417670683,8.061409273457466,28.587258123402705,8.841846274778883,2.3665967871485947,1027,43,198,22,22,327,143,249,0.172,0.713,0.115,-0.9523,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,12,23,0,4,7,1,13,3,0,0,1,33,31,22,2,5,12,1,3,3,0,1,3,1,2,2,14,14,0,0,4,0,1,6,4,12,1,1,14,6,22,11,29,15,5,37,0,7,2,0,12,17,0,8,16,118,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854560514405737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690295160384954,0.0,0.09601223677647418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857516394598723,0.06260601024142662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471123984183543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6191978368942328,0.0,0.10658816228979934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987496004913087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579410177330021,0.0,0.09096323312955752,0.10611832213826436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046198100723476,0.09681803362186846,0.0,0.10385814260633487,0.07337012339667325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731481106757283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313751418861102,0.0,0.0,0.2186557637819592,0.0920005610581163,0.0,0.0,0.21833423408845387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158571032011484,0.0,0.0,0.15052460609512178,0.0,0.0,0.18177556613292534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349916974600028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991899531853227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959333782460457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967517331248866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140555032865167,0.0,0.0,0.08770670068391395,0.0,0.08167252333036677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495591725177505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906479525864624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946635983047523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147322561117757,0.0,0.11233900349477008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254774563486544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823045378666799,0.0,0.0,0.16306737447773065,0.11977238805620258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694793359781573,0.0,0.0,0.08238111829600463,0.0,0.0923411728451323,0.09520551571887777,0.0,0.11466279348196287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747680693272168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661365351606472
mentalhealth,MindCruisersPodcast,2020/01/10,"We are here to help... Hey everyone, 

I wanted to let everyone know that a friend and I started a podcast about mental health. 

We dont so this for money but simply to bring awareness to mental health and to let everyone know they are not alone in struggle. Check it out.. heres a brief overview. 

The Mind Cruisers 

[Mental health, self care, Learning]  Mind Cruisers 
Episode 1 on Codependency. 

SFW

https://themindcruiserspodcast.transistor.fm/subscribe

Just getting going here but this episode is about codependency. Where the term comes from? how it manifests? Signs of it? And so much more. Check it out!!

This podcast:

*We want to expand your understanding of all aspects of self....including mental health, spiritual health, physical health, addiction and talk about how to get to know who you are on a deeper level.

*We are here to bring awareness, share experiences, and interview some pretty cool people we have met along the way in our life journey.
 
* Lastly, this for the people. We want to encourage people to be open about mental health issues because that shows everyone that we are not alone in struggle. We struggle the same.


Thanks so much for reading and be kind to everyone you meet, you never know how it might change someone's life. 

Jared",4.0778879310344855,7.421140578703703,3.758346104725416,81.38333333333334,83.02777777777777,6.127458492975732,24.577905491698594,7.503015589744147,1.6624813537675611,999,37,162,17,29,301,115,216,0.0,0.799,0.201,0.9927,0,2,0,0,0,0,48.0,9,4,1,0,16,10,0,3,9,1,13,10,0,3,2,44,31,14,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,1,10,0,0,1,13,19,0,0,6,2,3,6,4,3,0,0,1,1,16,7,31,25,7,21,0,0,0,0,25,10,0,2,4,111,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084348193074974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16027057161315786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716597582327428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788871194276657,0.0,0.08185057110457393,0.06665014835161916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068079734211006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696669732413605,0.0,0.0756858223207788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05977833130448041,0.0,0.08084859208841746,0.0,0.04397296447343562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5757085475250788,0.0,0.0,0.05186161538771538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075750363897598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057226635296864,0.1700891174092435,0.06306947317025759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582386490516697,0.10930193844998527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3898698638632152,0.08208072279669516,0.1562497217911466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137563882583723,0.0,0.05967497068264264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16092247422142958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07871634597337344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739412393777363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143421420564869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555804911990833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05476513904413032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426617594985325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218963578521655,0.0,0.07123483393568514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08054821497868672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13691012870810412,0.06141523334750292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thekitkat233,2020/01/10,Ever get a massive low after having a rlly good time? Its like how people like get off a sugar rush or something - when i go partying or out with loads of my friends and i genuinely have such a good time the next day i just have this rlly deep feeling of being lonely and almost numbness. i’m an only child and dont go out much although i am quite extroverted,2.8128828828828847,4.366142000000004,4.6875675675675685,83.42207207207208,74.94594594594594,6.554954954954956,24.495495495495497,7.1686216300943375,1.1186198198198205,284,9,55,3,6,97,55,74,0.08199999999999999,0.6890000000000001,0.23,0.8908,0,2,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,0,6,0,6,2,0,1,1,13,12,8,0,0,3,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,6,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,0,2,5,5,7,11,1,15,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,3,9,38,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24704065931817726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910511311269585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891378719292517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231599152081052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247420859206506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906046264199848,0.0,0.2577876524037323,0.0,0.2804176792205059,0.4138509727328415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24105641118400506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813574702883073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623748814509826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876312099471308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103504125000718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624024503006648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18992651391497384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877127810471168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Epicradcola,2020/01/10,Feels like I'm not seeing it or my own eyes I have no idea where to post this and I have no clue what it means but it feels almost like I'm seeing from my eyes. Like I'm looking from behind or other times like I'm seeing out of my chest. I know it sounds like I'm batshit crazy but I don't have any background of mental disorders or physical disorders. Any ideas why I feel the way I do?,-0.002919896640825925,1.8874423255814,2.1320155038759734,96.79657622739019,85.04651162790698,5.217571059431528,16.532299741602067,6.42735559955562,-0.4731250645994831,304,6,73,3,9,102,48,86,0.07200000000000001,0.758,0.16899999999999998,0.8573,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,5,3,3,0,0,16,19,6,0,0,6,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,10,9,5,7,19,1,5,0,0,6,0,0,2,0,4,6,40,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17272900941711422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346052798102512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.395388849190341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26165624306338386,0.12323059357247693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3894521320151628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479884172353098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4213621679967125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485251013425882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878978235485546,0.0,0.0,0.17383457368747546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16520270373885682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4123689847149641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058332867972336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369186476878561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556500732168376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,23Aceboogie,2020/01/10,Hey guys Hey guys for the past 2 months I been suffering some hardcore anxiety heart racing tightness in my throat and troubling breathing tightness in my chest and barely being able to take a deep breath I would like to inform you guys that as of yesterday I’ve been good I started going out with my friends more often being more productive just surrounding myself with love and positive energy thinking positive also I’ve been mediating that really helped me a lot just being a more positive person helping others it was really hard at first I had a lot of self doubt but just having people surrounding me with live and support really helped I also have been exercising and doing yoga I’m a male 22 years old I really thought my anxiety would never go till I became more confident in myself I feel so good now I also been changing my diet eating more fruits and vegetables I dropped eating unhealthy sodas candy and all that and just started focusing on my health and myself if I can do so can you I also been doing some reading that some people in the community recommended me which really helped don’t ever doubt yourself there people that love and support you talk about your feeling with others make your emotions known love yourself,8.918289855072468,8.577985365217394,8.866739130434784,65.63039855072464,60.56521739130434,11.666666666666668,35.68840579710145,11.038039088145766,4.189623188405797,1014,38,156,23,12,331,127,230,0.07400000000000001,0.728,0.198,0.985,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,5,0,1,15,13,0,2,7,0,21,16,5,1,3,43,37,20,0,3,6,0,5,1,1,2,2,0,0,6,9,15,6,2,6,3,0,2,2,4,0,1,9,6,29,9,19,23,11,25,0,1,0,3,23,10,0,9,13,124,38,1,0.10484601457410672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353812799003656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041382834605994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091318133399153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21456729549108852,0.0,0.1179376545081123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483922272989484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602659047784564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918196643612379,0.0,0.0,0.08100377077817057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917281251963772,0.1758797252785838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114421148858858,0.0,0.0,0.09392143520238487,0.0,0.0,0.11144641067160097,0.0,0.12424303208419454,0.28110429403955445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05122246674414993,0.0,0.09258095173696862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782726645238871,0.2838828648445233,0.0,0.06998552887086203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368708854372597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086370999132475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001825529750826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008738448481848,0.2180610754839144,0.0915474958268041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487438739466552,0.0,0.3358352083590599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093772592669239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484210975100564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379560297144225,0.0,0.0,0.07883115471221967,0.08427125501822137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06718109264256948,0.0,0.08323602415836613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895920114865852,0.0,0.0,0.06751739587410903
mentalhealth,chlgal,2020/01/10,"I’m coming clean I am going to my doctor today and am going tot elk her that my thoughts have gotten too loud and that everyday, every thought is followed by one of suicide. I’m scared. I’m scared shitless. 
I have been making jokes about it hoping to curb it but I cry all day and can not sleep but I am always tired. 
I feel like I am losing my mind but I’m scared of what will happen if I don’t tell me. 
On the same account I’m scared of what comes next.. 

I’ve tried medicine but I don’t think medicine will fix this.",-0.20287270251871808,1.8691518849557558,1.4796460176991175,99.93620149761743,87.67256637168144,3.8309053778080333,16.656909462219197,4.713530739802397,-0.9954514635806672,405,9,96,1,13,131,71,113,0.21600000000000005,0.713,0.071,-0.9598,1,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,8,0,4,1,0,13,3,1,1,1,21,31,8,1,2,6,0,1,1,0,2,2,1,1,0,7,5,0,1,4,1,1,5,3,5,0,1,4,2,13,3,8,25,2,10,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,5,55,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315237795883267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27232015059566245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17362834966320184,0.10193965255812316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16178750122822455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317763009585973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992304363669114,0.11292255814912013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17966538115369093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977745984033393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699544836420254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07722318385079205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17683569815747374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551044700530236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15960184943707525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16810524647405367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10710977947798572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6330075508767705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15818040014584062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17289881858270906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13815686657405996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10128246838144993,0.0,0.2509738872474189,0.0,0.18167389797436453,0.14982831956900294,0.0,0.0,0.10731660569567217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ehoepf45,2020/01/10,"Am I having an anxiety attack? I've had anxiety attacks before, but this time it feels different. My abomenal muscles and inner thigh muscles are super restless/tense, I feel panicked, nervous, can't focus on anything. Idk what to do, it's driving me insane, I just left school because I couldn't stand being in the classroom.",5.058499999999999,7.3109411833333375,6.003333333333334,73.39500000000002,70.5,7.466666666666668,35.33333333333333,8.238735603445708,3.3767333333333336,261,14,38,4,5,86,52,60,0.281,0.638,0.081,-0.8462,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,2,1,2,0,8,1,1,0,0,6,10,2,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,2,6,1,3,7,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,26,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40964523524553936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22032962791398134,0.0,0.0,0.6091924978186652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321361221351366,0.0,0.2278295232616839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27973438798765304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707577522860505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29090348965738017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27097015120239604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561230624879863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway135969,2020/01/10,"Am I going mad? My mental health has never been perfect, I have a few problems (Bipolar 1, Anxiety) But it’s definitely not the worst. This past month however, my mental health as a whole has taken an absolute pitfall. I started out super depressed and suicidal, and then for 2 weeks I went into a mixed manic episode that I thankfully ended up getting through,

The last week of my winter break was hard and it’s only gotten even harder now that school’s started back up. I’ve been suicidal, so suicidal in fact to the point to where the only thing I think about is suicide, my sleep patterns have gotten weird and all out of order, yesterday I fell asleep at 6:00 pm and slept the entirety of the day, the day before however I fell asleep at 2:00 am and barely got any sleep. 

My thoughts are the most concerning to me, they have turned all into a distorted mush, literally the only thing I think about it suicide, I can’t stop thinking about it, it’s turned into an obsession, I wake up and my head says “Lets go kill ourselves!” I literally have the constant urge to get a knife and perform amputations on my body parts. Most of the time I don’t even know what’s going on, I forget most of my days I really only remember small flashes when I try to think back at what I did yesterday.

Socially I avoid any and all interaction unless it’s absolutely necessary, the only human I talk to that’s not my parents is my best friend who’s concerned for me because he’s been noticing some behavioral changes (he has no knowledge of my mental health) he’s concerned I’m going insane and wants to get me help. What do you guys think?",6.448289794496688,6.270283924764893,7.116650992685474,75.604938174852,65.55172413793103,10.223685127133402,33.396203413444795,9.861636050157227,3.156838941135492,1288,50,242,25,18,427,172,319,0.177,0.755,0.068,-0.9879,3,1,0,0,0,2,32.0,0,1,1,4,11,13,2,2,19,0,21,13,8,0,6,43,48,16,6,2,4,1,1,0,1,0,5,1,0,2,16,15,0,2,9,0,0,7,6,8,0,0,12,2,35,5,35,35,12,49,0,1,0,0,15,17,0,4,23,162,51,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149205601523946,0.0,0.06463932412605226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12994464873894254,0.0,0.051508069294786164,0.0,0.07190000093992945,0.0,0.08867349732149331,0.0,0.0,0.09385617530348726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893857238122025,0.0,0.0,0.09131032126405968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634790813231931,0.0,0.07277641091586369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483850986905298,0.0,0.0,0.11161782147183973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528151654690205,0.0,0.13243725411129476,0.0,0.1920844389762194,0.0,0.06757929070704911,0.0,0.0,0.08366447380992031,0.0,0.0,0.07569195442844236,0.0,0.08671742791480967,0.2694463714142889,0.0,0.0,0.05663598881403468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348247177205699,0.0,0.04643687474330381,0.06887564049583922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640303903608429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554567390577262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744402147019023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516864055994229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619942778232553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213156513286654,0.0,0.0,0.09382297607645328,0.09150109728350213,0.08066113692749982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798761741252149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085140491144167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05413039788373023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571766737571996,0.0,0.0,0.06719473058509838,0.0,0.0855146156969626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691143459243066,0.08613318494296897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961362094544868,0.0,0.0,0.07064256559989833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4621253737621969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791480539795762,0.0,0.07779270328912151,0.0,0.0,0.11227097616046122,0.2707086083063395,0.0,0.06708050546527206,0.04927038506215725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736733995585844,0.1838150968940767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049838018992603886,0.0,0.1355554309693027,0.0,0.0,0.07832877837100873,0.0,0.09433693489534392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gmephisto1,2020/01/10,"This Is My Cake [This is my cake.](https://imgur.com/PNB2oWw)

This is my cake. I had to get this cake for myself. I have plenty of family and friends that could get this cake for me, but I had to get it for myself. A personal birthday cake for a personal day. This cake was provided via a work function, and I would not have gotten it for myself otherwise. 

This is my cake. Its made me realize that I very much should make my birthday personal. I'm 29 now, and in my 29 years I have experienced so much pain and loss that I may as well be turning 59. My life has been constant struggle, and continues to be. As a result of said struggle, I have various mental conditions that provide strife to daily life. I got this cake as a way to appreciate myself on my birthday, because I know I'm important. I know others may think I'm important, but they don't know how to show that. They don't understand that I need to be told that I'm important. They don't know that every day I struggle. 

This is my cake. Its flavor is sweet and its color pleases me. Many things make me happy, but most of them are not created by myself. I do not make myself happy. I give that all to my friends and family. I love them, I do not love myself. This cake allows me to understand the need for the latter. 

This is my cake. It is a way for me to reward myself for staying alive. I was born today. My life began on this day. I have done great things, and I recognize that, but am not recognized for that. No one tells me about the great things I've done. No one thanks me for the things I do for them. No one does things for me. I've given myself this cake because I give to everyone but myself. My life is important. I have made an insurmountable impact on those around me, and their lives would be forever incomplete without me. I make sacrifices of pieces of myself in order to make their lives whole. I have become a crumbling shell in order to fill others' lives with substance. 

This is my cake, and I got it for myself.",2.265128395228146,4.284779032418957,3.7030909213452863,87.81663948237517,77.87780548628429,7.128152591494239,22.309159533598447,8.098718942377014,1.1584081822470855,1556,46,321,28,37,512,148,401,0.063,0.765,0.172,0.9945,0,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,0,0,8,3,6,17,0,3,12,0,43,7,0,10,1,52,79,20,0,6,11,0,0,0,2,5,5,1,0,3,40,12,0,0,8,1,0,1,12,5,1,3,16,5,71,12,45,53,7,23,1,1,1,2,20,7,0,4,10,248,111,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561109641836611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355246153131446,0.09380519963450894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178570134316426,0.0,0.06781452858896532,0.0,0.0,0.16433018662580856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432811408382739,0.17383814681857684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156228957963552,0.08116004038462829,0.0,0.0,0.16014030703288565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312427707635553,0.0,0.13312674935634766,0.16295680678111618,0.0,0.0,0.13586224444183512,0.18728460092420607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18083201980381894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867145381811927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23997138994959666,0.0,0.0,0.22500027793449032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331621148239002,0.1607370977731389,0.28347738118013593,0.08611182850510449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559556624288613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12487554655079974,0.12595801708832138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726646070431796,0.0,0.0903779509320332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22248866120710245,0.0,0.09323428254548226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079363844344288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905305335031361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26638081876801983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423785575754371,0.0781977079034016,0.0,0.0,0.2821387041660117,0.054423594461296285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050944880540031,0.08116004038462829,0.0,0.0,0.09238603781216403,0.0,0.1768428573226002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.070081140578808,0.0,0.13483657398466825,0.0,0.0,0.07636771383392442,0.0,0.0,0.09482807213976717,0.0,0.08187532604706592,0.0,0.06183445960635649,0.0,0.0,0.12067227304154172,0.0,0.0,0.05469603466685696
mentalhealth,dukefan33,2020/01/10,"Anyone else have Dysthymia? So for a year or two I’ve just been feeling overall tired and fatigued. Just haven’t felt like myself. Concentration issues and kind of a brain fog. Did a bunch of blood tests and all normal. He thought could be depression or anxiety. recently prescribed me Cymbalta but I haven’t started it yet. Haven’t officially been diagnosed with Dysthymia but seems like what I could have. I feel down and just overall fatigued but I still get stuff done. I go to the gym every day, hangout with family and friends, etc. 

Anyone have any tips for dealing with Dysthymia? Any medications work for you? I have been prescribed Cymbalta so we’ll see how that goes.",2.9364900000000027,5.954096904000004,3.221675000000001,85.87971250000002,83.96000000000002,6.325,27.0125,7.645422480735847,1.9581300000000008,543,24,96,10,16,167,82,125,0.08900000000000001,0.8270000000000001,0.084,0.3591,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,1,0,1,8,7,0,0,4,0,16,7,2,1,1,26,25,13,0,3,8,0,3,2,1,1,5,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,5,2,0,1,3,3,0,1,7,4,10,4,10,14,3,8,0,3,1,0,5,1,0,3,8,65,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23306568334311484,0.0,0.13109236700811147,0.0,0.0,0.2396422458202883,0.1755818331602983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19129798697442646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736391175544833,0.0,0.0,0.11051507740178358,0.1766679185623553,0.14759485960451668,0.17393002497777707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753640336463329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431519517049311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911152483944035,0.0,0.0,0.14438087367266794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615459592994696,0.0,0.17329274981899484,0.0,0.16453553033951734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323947711662938,0.0,0.0895301910833098,0.0,0.0973896467485992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17885864293843218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178448386453227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674387919973812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263037994027808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678995368421182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16920047116545162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365542714836208,0.15600260710734745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129174390477605,0.0,0.13685086040374975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961698478310524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13604322694331572,0.0,0.1969567719006388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673969310935145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247544391534337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11035227237724668
mentalhealth,peach-ttea,2020/01/10,"does anyone else experience extreme anxiety related to the weather? or know why I could be? for about the last 4 years sometimes I'll wake up and the weather outside will make me super anxious. sometimes it'll be bad enough that it will even trigger a dissociative episode that'll last a good portion of my morning. the weather isn't usually even ""scary"" or severe weather, it'll just be a normal day outside. it tends to happen to me the most in the fall and spring and when seasons start changing. the only way I can rationalize this is maybe it's related to my PTSD? Like maybe subconsciously the weather triggers something reminding me of my trauma. or maybe there's just subconscious nostalgia connected to certain weather and it's just really uncomfortable for me? I just want to hear other perspectives of what's happening or if anyone else experiences this or things I could do to help it. thanks !",6.229770459081834,7.916341353293415,6.5129491017964085,73.15509231536926,66.60479041916167,9.638522954091815,36.07235528942115,9.928628108626363,3.925938522954092,734,37,121,17,12,236,97,167,0.09,0.7959999999999999,0.114,0.6198,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,9,7,0,0,11,0,14,1,1,3,1,24,23,11,0,5,10,0,0,1,0,5,0,1,0,0,14,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,11,5,15,13,3,13,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,7,10,82,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261151064020044,0.1515323066409127,0.0,0.18757806741950514,0.2748705748892161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199559718213643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418951122098931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21418884915534053,0.0,0.0,0.0865048003902013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738084409608625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241021098448409,0.0,0.0,0.1385954243522395,0.0,0.17718739220197915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624159637733989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250454208277864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372270448075791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15117783511225447,0.0,0.08990663883608463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737160843069475,0.2186728779467843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553069327659057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953493491721032,0.0,0.4042644047161876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142203092643612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020143227700791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15679450195597572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592914566329785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515323066409127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032622701659146,0.2653222768684838,0.0,0.09494015063045808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12349180486038537,0.0,0.0,0.08911212037435051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147728740492151,0.0,0.07911522104057638,0.10646866979225897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103432606378453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637736604837944
mentalhealth,DRTG98,2020/01/10,I’m on the verge of cutting myself to end it Literally don’t stop me please give reasons to do it,0.7690909090909095,2.356187727272733,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727276,80.81818181818181,6.218181818181819,24.63636363636364,7.1686216300943375,0.9369272727272728,78,3,18,1,2,28,19,22,0.161,0.7390000000000001,0.1,-0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41004111087897466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.444109046788674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5081860545404143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.475995301495221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870514809101143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FlowersforWolf,2020/01/10,"Pregnant, depressed, anxious. I’m 35 weeks pregnant and these past few months feel like they’ve been the shittiest time of my life. Im slowly realizing all the hell that my childhood was in addition to my husband and I growing apart (in my opinion not his). I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety in the past and had been doing better and now I’m not. I feel so desperate and alone. And I’m really feeling like I’ll never be a good wife or mother. I’m so terrified of not being a good mom to my son. I just feel like a huge fuck up and I don’t want to fuck up anymore. Sometimes giving up feels like it would be easier. I don’t feel like eating or getting out of bed anymore and I don’t know where to turn to.",1.542542857142859,3.4283592733333315,3.613904761904763,88.23600000000002,79.6,6.685714285714287,24.714285714285715,7.7094869923839395,1.299028571428572,561,21,119,9,14,191,86,150,0.23800000000000002,0.5920000000000001,0.16899999999999998,-0.9528,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,5,14,3,1,6,0,12,4,0,0,2,31,29,13,0,2,6,5,6,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,12,1,0,8,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,4,6,12,8,16,21,2,19,1,2,0,2,7,10,3,3,13,71,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328934885358687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815903301150858,0.14495707739876165,0.2545038769471888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134823509860468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210314608988986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312961510765988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3892732080065032,0.4583338803890424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372464548800151,0.06703820506597077,0.1230894453898948,0.0,0.2152455799811925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859997279983208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705174254605504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063121044711386,0.31343605821956605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15027854175103306,0.10241814900495023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896283456745343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24497840314580724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220054254332246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12690475937510887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414052427894152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482029583686188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13956761157382847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756822850124991,0.0,0.10292488514775637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114981727994058,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SpaceBubz,2020/01/10,"Possibly narcissistic? But don't want to be. Any advice? Hey so I know this is weird, but I've been doing some research and I think I have a history of narcissism that I want to break. I've been reading books on empathy, and have always had an ability to feel not just my own pain and emotions, but others as well. I'm trying to figure out if there are any tips for breaking the cycle. Recently, I've been called selfish and wrapped up in my own stuff, and on some level, because I am rebuilding, I have been. I dont wanna be perceived this way.",2.8128828828828847,4.366142000000004,4.528108108108106,84.56531531531532,74.94594594594594,7.816216216216216,26.74774774774775,8.515128840125781,1.8883045045045048,426,16,87,8,9,144,76,111,0.11800000000000001,0.831,0.052000000000000005,-0.7314,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,16,1,0,0,0,22,22,11,0,4,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,5,2,0,0,3,3,1,0,5,1,9,1,13,15,4,10,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,3,1,64,14,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336023390641397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989133869541589,0.0,0.0,0.3251319742062667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14572605837596989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24410246789557255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801713509876125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26890534345620226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208736804494194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137869099522392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25437198418386703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694992396289265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391202646834181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360385383105305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27366143736894843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531771584415431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16230304194546386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820023411669227,0.18975118660760756,0.0,0.0,0.2149396694126189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,extraspicyalmondmilk,2020/01/10,"Advice for fitting doctor appointments into a new 9-6 schedule? TLDR: I got my first “big girl” job and I’m not sure how to navigate making and keeping important doctors appointments after always having my “weekend” be Wednesday and Thursday. 

Good news! After months of being depressingly unemployed, I was just offered a position to kick off a fulfilling career path (transitioning from service industry to a job with benefits and upward mobility, Mon-Fri 9-6). This is my first “big girl” job so I’m pretty intimidated. I get a lot of advice from my mother who has a great corporate job, but I want to hear from others who are also dealing with health issues like myself and don’t have as much authority in their position. 

I’ve been seeing my therapist on and off for about a decade (currently every other Wednesday) and recently started seeing a psychiatrist once a month(usually on a Wednesday or Friday. ) In addition to those, I’ve started seeking treatment for a chronic stomach condition that they believe to be gastoparesis. 

My therapist has mentioned working around my schedule with me, so I’m not so concerned about that. My psych office is closed on weekends and only open during the time I’d be working, but I have to go to appointments or risk losing my prescriptions. I also need to prioritize gastro appointments because it’s taken a massive toll on my physical and mental health, but again, usually closed on weekends. 

I’m really worried about starting off on the wrong foot. I don’t think it’s ridiculous to tell them about my already established appointments this month, but I don’t want them thinking “why did we hire this girl who constantly needs to go to the doctor?” 

Anyone have experience with reconciling a normal full time day job and their responsibilities to their health? I’m supposed to get paid time off, but that’ll be used up quick if I’m potentially taking two days off a month. 
Thank you!",7.797861918406332,8.532823994269343,8.202603356528861,65.85434574976124,62.63896848137536,11.117533087733662,37.2494201118843,10.914260884657429,4.493074389411925,1550,72,240,39,21,512,193,349,0.07,0.868,0.062,-0.7742,8,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,1,6,5,14,11,1,1,17,0,21,9,2,3,1,47,51,25,0,6,11,1,0,1,0,1,7,1,0,3,14,21,0,1,3,3,1,2,5,5,0,3,6,3,29,6,49,39,3,56,0,2,2,0,20,23,0,4,32,164,43,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17478831177135276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986929660690372,0.14304114333836826,0.07441649607132818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253453700177553,0.0,0.0,0.0796154817951614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05451831481369671,0.0,0.0,0.1007618220551928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664669844104776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535544032947515,0.09220282886723767,0.07702962537024524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27461936511917456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535224898370359,0.0,0.0,0.08748389948886856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214552759744804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345145348493937,0.0,0.10165513926550797,0.075013241649506,0.07152877395903813,0.09860162358241736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28519341344559784,0.1007989479125271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334616596197688,0.4437486785095188,0.07949330873012311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043693077979017884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000540972772819,0.0,0.07603383756854215,0.0,0.0,0.059698084936657625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012873200846376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28554239715490504,0.0,0.06574449567604132,0.13262878984008494,0.0,0.08637619732130744,0.0,0.0,0.08762661828088672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524460305071844,0.0,0.06801880976531721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098682802280934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05729389808665548,0.0,0.08830557474201406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425351045866394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18990615835517985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429076258649652,0.0,0.06724345797755664,0.0,0.07816951391463846,0.08233908096714718,0.0,0.20768021426009745,0.0,0.1146117673016072,0.0,0.0,0.15644956609251026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736430878970518,0.0,0.0,0.07724251407535503,0.0984992383770715,0.0,0.10550132615453353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080700538670052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021846068370765,0.09082486561878414,0.0,0.0,0.09778235958560794,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aggravating_Lettuce,2020/01/10,"Memory loss after abuse; Is trying to regain that time ' worth it'? So, I've spent the vast majority of my life in extremely high stress situations. 

I'm 21 now, gonna just do a brief explanation here rreeeall quick. Mom died when I was 5, given to my dad,  then i was given to my grandma after making an outcry of abuse & put in foster care for a bit, given to my dad again when I was 11, put him in jail for 79 years for sexual abuse when I was 12, started dating my first real boyfriend when I was 14. We were together 3 & 1/2 years, he was severely physically & sexually abusive and almost killed me, during that time I developed severe fibromyalgia. & Ontop of all that I'm back with my grandma, who loves me but is kinda the definition of borderline personality disorder. So yeah. It's been a ruff & turbulent life so far. 

That all being said, I've spent a lot of time in therapy but my therapists always end up getting focused on present stresses, like my grandma or romantic relationships, and I've dumped a few therapists and councilors for this reason. 

Lately though, I've found myself extremely focused on memory loss. My memories are so spare when it comes to any of the time periods that I was in unhealthy situations, and those time periods come out to basically, Any memories before age 7, ages 11-13 & 14-18. I remember some, but it's like.... A small cluster of two second flash backs, enough to know the memories are uncomfortable at times, but not enough to make sense of anything anymore really. I know memories fade... But I don't remember my mother. I dont remember my step dad. I don't remember anything about my half brothers or sisters. It really is almost like having amnesia. 

Occasionally I'll have really bad days when I can think about everything, and I get pretty overwhelmed, but some part of me feels like if I'm able to actually retain and process everything I'll be better off than be at the whim of my memory suppression. 

So, that has been the thing ive been trying to do, use other people's information, paperwork, and my lil flash backs to try to piece together my past, but it was expressed to me recently that I might only be hurting meself by trying to uncover memories my brain has chosen to hide. It's just also a lot of emotional energy to be funneling into something negative. 

Tldr: has anyone else experienced severe memory loss after abuse? Have you tried to work on regaining memories, is it work the effort and pain?",7.600000000000001,7.109399420382168,8.66842802547771,66.47036178343951,63.28874734607218,12.716467091295115,35.188195329087044,12.052694948225742,4.506236959660297,1961,77,345,61,25,675,245,471,0.16399999999999998,0.752,0.084,-0.9902,0,0,1,0,4,0,73.0,1,1,0,8,24,18,2,3,15,1,37,5,1,4,2,54,62,32,2,1,13,7,1,4,0,2,3,1,0,1,20,14,0,2,11,0,3,6,5,11,0,4,19,3,40,7,54,36,13,62,0,5,0,1,18,18,0,11,42,223,60,2,0.06401142164021255,0.3792153370926247,0.062465913762265936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281963846839484,0.0,0.0,0.05118991075898832,0.0532626306527305,0.41613809162088494,0.0,0.08705992352104691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348212988499619,0.0447582743505224,0.06558726599023515,0.10535189176659818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14766249615621,0.05344686331070934,0.0,0.0,0.05446900515184295,0.0,0.0,0.056612900607764374,0.06988389361825942,0.0,0.0,0.07145791639863824,0.0,0.0,0.06526391049981466,0.0,0.0,0.11028034356883742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04128207142515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643374956240275,0.0,0.07336263488917809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750209094301369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053473329014175,0.07200423364343042,0.05669511997669378,0.1322818197718475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505867657985752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03236609810931074,0.045729772409854666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0544480825469149,0.0,0.07018521986019421,0.0,0.0,0.0668866516660264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763158143380528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06852555078155978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708191539637577,0.0,0.07035800658032601,0.0,0.07220767175143443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042632029424033,0.1250909890864388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884044321681767,0.05777280720305045,0.0,0.08545624200335393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790600271918336,0.0,0.07496940338041701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048683570622512495,0.06811266576597923,0.0,0.0,0.06931813176884849,0.06110614499891561,0.044377459975689884,0.05589230434060192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512262832957527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869831764340964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285901171021028,0.12302206742654476,0.06581440253335791,0.06320355647426328,0.06872431123578178,0.29004984974986825,0.0,0.060889520447902835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21694405897998512,0.0,0.0,0.1439030397940613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049279119693747014,0.0,0.0,0.04530761370192152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664973443369048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320263929629567,0.14864438840835734,0.042526344220744604,0.04101593431912607,0.06289089675776945,0.0,0.2239534483477488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21729776736816867,0.0,0.06252985771914096,0.0,0.0,0.05528531595925412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320215465285396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244251367880022
mentalhealth,LoveAndDefiance,2020/01/10,"Is it possible for a child who has been emotionally abused by a parent to grow into an adult who does not want to admit their own mistakes? How can I help ? I know a person who is in a situation where he does not see or admit when he is hurting other people. He denies the feelings of others and vehemently insists that he does nothing wrong. Consequently, he never apologises.

Although I could assume that this person is narcissistic, he is quite empathetic at the same time. But only when he is not the cause of the distress that the people around him feel.

Is it possible to be a self-defense mechanism? Fear of being vulnerable if he acknowledges that he can be  wrong sometimes? Inferiority / Superiority complex?

This person also suffers from agoraphobia and has low self-esteem. Furthermore, he gets easily annoyed if someone points out his mistakes or if he receives any kind of criticism, even constructive criticism. 

What would be the smartest way for me to approach this problem?",6.587753496503495,8.539917897727271,7.524090909090912,65.23209790209792,66.04545454545455,9.96083916083916,34.561188811188806,10.214889679676881,4.066017132867133,794,37,121,20,13,266,112,176,0.23399999999999999,0.672,0.094,-0.9752,1,0,0,0,1,0,20.0,0,0,1,1,7,14,1,2,12,0,18,0,0,2,1,32,26,13,0,9,9,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,15,5,0,0,8,0,0,3,4,12,0,0,1,3,7,2,17,19,2,16,0,4,1,0,27,8,0,6,4,90,22,0,0.0,0.16151156485686527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901144788809078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269920747409542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134968642229095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003355778308074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883682645749226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35787181103123705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333657838355366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003509534502574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15339282390889292,0.13785041485990246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121921716985644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136939935918598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14592855110057149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14195160576164614,0.07491542819787422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10513490926357902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307983888455512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036740725513055,0.0,0.0,0.15136221949518594,0.0,0.0,0.18900799371666505,0.3570762830975045,0.0,0.0,0.12886219885547578,0.3073504657849956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043551386312416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498830273373428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862579648929742,0.0,0.28441357018520874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322432185226764,0.0,0.0,0.1154996720882108,0.0,0.13481950492156086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948665828201358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804024076556336,0.10820089078433907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683461282211488,0.2980791777125529,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DepressedVenom,2020/01/10,"Anyone else feel ecstatic from coffee? If I ""use"" it everyday however it stops being intensely effective.
I know this isn't new but would anyone like to share or discuss the science behind the brain and its nerves - in terms of caffeine affecting the mood..? 

Sorry for my English.
Tl;Dr: how/why does caffeine affect depression",4.886842105263156,8.00827373684211,5.504473684210527,72.51881578947369,74.78947368421052,8.712280701754386,30.552631578947373,9.2995712137729,3.6976105263157897,261,12,37,7,6,84,51,57,0.14400000000000002,0.691,0.165,0.3306,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,3,0,3,1,1,4,0,12,6,4,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,2,6,4,1,5,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,5,23,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4003215780512863,0.2933088708431623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31956265374455706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24655672419898494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505094832672908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391348612657173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447424823509846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157321906571953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985297377337044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.276473268017906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3204464604658547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393275423194333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472381391935217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25830659775306897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20335205014238011,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cheeksdrytoday,2020/01/10,How to find a good therapist? I’ve done therapy for a long time with shitty therapists. How do I find a good one? Is a psychologist better?,0.4053571428571416,2.8618616785714286,3.5757142857142874,81.89428571428573,92.92857142857142,8.514285714285714,21.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.3432571428571443,109,4,22,4,4,39,21,28,0.11699999999999999,0.584,0.3,0.6848,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,2,0,5,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,14,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192794906816509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537248953253703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.453218535007121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41591437558035604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219415805049599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16800803947113618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835367432002386,0.5757462598268596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445736382900173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wrenbrownie,2020/01/10,"Cult awareness Hello! I've been spreading awareness today about the religion Jehovah witnesses. Most people don't realise that it is a cult. It is difficult for members to leave, they shun the ones that do. They monitor every decision of their followers, they preach against education. Many people who leave are left emotionally traumatised. There is also warranted speculation against jws and child abuse. I ask you to research Jehovah witness related to children, brainwashing, fear mongering, and control. Thank you!
For more info visit jwfacts.com 
JW.support.com 
Reddit - Exjw subreddit 
Instagram - exjwrelief 
Jw_infoandsupport 
Documentaries - Leah remini 
YouTube John cedars",8.616100533130233,13.050302643564356,7.768712871287132,53.20269611576544,72.06930693069306,12.216603198781414,42.422696115765426,10.727762888450028,7.4148074638233075,561,35,59,23,13,174,81,101,0.185,0.792,0.023,-0.9440000000000001,1,0,0,0,1,0,20.0,0,2,4,1,3,3,0,1,3,0,7,0,0,1,0,6,10,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,1,1,0,7,1,9,9,2,4,1,0,0,0,12,1,0,1,1,38,12,1,0.0,0.2681384222950449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18097872851839128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21156778450605204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538240898726197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25456646553034057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19067456948121286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546598432797233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4792557929489893,0.2458847154027084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294411752879869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335241417415416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137874695304463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25681206603895346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20835434942738007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145138812678224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Effective-Promise,2020/01/10,"Un diagnosed anxiety/autism perhaps? need advice I am a 15 year old guy who used to be an introvert, now and extrovert *depending.* For the past 2 years now it's been so hard just even getting up going to school. Walking down the block just to go to the entrance is enough to make me want to run away from my own home.   


 It also may not help that I am a trans guy, so gender dysphoria and the constant trans-phobia from my friends is the icing on the cake, but I was wondering if there is a possibility that I may be suffering from some sort of social anxiety?  
I have gotten use to the feeling of always wanted to vomit whilst going to school, and have my ways of coping. (which is me eternally screaming and making stupid jokes to myself) But I can never shake off this sense of impending doom, I always want to run away from something and it makes no fucking sense. 

I also have trouble with paying attention in class and am usually always drawing, ( thinking about my next big move with stories i write) and i want to avoid going to school at all costs. but my mother is somewhat of a helicopter mom and she forces me to go.

 I have a hard time with social interaction, like two days ago I was talking to the doctor/nurse (not sure) and she was giving me very intense eye contact and i was looking anywhere but her eyes. I was also being fidgety and i assume she thought i just wanted to dip from the office. (not the case/ i needed a very important needle)  
And everytime i interact with anyone of my classmates i always assume the worst! (which is partly true cause one of the people in my friend group is an asshole)

Honestly I don't know what to do and I was looking for advice (I don't like self diagnosing and was wondering what to do) thank you in advance (: - )",2.9906451612903235,5.067716531791909,4.314348312511655,84.01033656535523,75.878612716763,7.007868730188327,25.03412269252285,7.941651935203635,1.5446937534961775,1384,48,262,22,31,456,187,346,0.11699999999999999,0.759,0.124,-0.3992,0,1,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,0,1,13,18,2,2,20,0,32,6,2,7,4,64,62,24,0,8,11,2,3,2,2,2,3,1,1,3,11,18,0,2,9,1,2,11,7,9,0,2,10,8,39,9,47,47,7,38,1,2,4,1,23,11,1,11,17,194,50,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17915683368268154,0.08125951917702533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219924302149929,0.3051056143236684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701269497702959,0.0,0.0,0.06409747614992874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722531071528379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941698725826521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906221018504584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059119271843918235,0.0,0.0,0.1860853137911252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382766201411273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471914311857517,0.0,0.060546868842265573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0463508754913288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164732362875135,0.08474701570563026,0.04789355289187641,0.08793777902333952,0.2604895701236093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815345204100557,0.0,0.0,0.16423581025902298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06144416261233913,0.0,0.09195202628151407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05037918367250837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957021696978612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15395865773888046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835703960828168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736226127749672,0.0,0.09743021722318193,0.0,0.1359436097420436,0.0707012030978773,0.0,0.0974915993462106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619176529369892,0.0,0.06211765501643925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992691823419132,0.08750895177522336,0.06355211910338096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334363655184088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783234156925568,0.0,0.0,0.09563132612329553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18689111050332669,0.0,0.07057169305774555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639745976521528,0.0,0.0,0.07368050658318147,0.0,0.08439699934691959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05873814193992809,0.0,0.07277537785134776,0.053453247928136376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954782377047332,0.0,0.0,0.15834610572282734,0.1009610510505775,0.15127394738903213,0.2703453587888587,0.07276301666400826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19882341885569188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806436085723207
mentalhealth,Perversia_Rayne,2020/01/10,"Swings and roundabouts Today is one of those days where I woke up feeling tired but in a pretty productive mood, thinking I could get bits and pieces done. I've done a couple of them but I'm now suddenly just desperate to go back to bed and sleep. I don't want to do any of the things i had planned, even just small things on my computer, nevermind the bigger stuff. But I've set an alarm to make me get stuff sorted for my bf and I'm hoping once I'm focusing on that, I'll just feel I can get on with the rest.",2.6150909090909096,3.4821233727272727,3.8252272727272754,92.12784090909092,74.36363636363636,7.6818181818181825,22.84090909090909,8.07648339933343,0.8344545454545451,401,10,95,6,8,131,73,110,0.087,0.8270000000000001,0.086,0.2304,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,7,3,0,1,6,0,8,2,1,1,0,19,22,7,0,3,6,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,6,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,4,2,9,1,14,17,3,15,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,2,5,60,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851894782087547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532081560284812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063269553705368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15089227622996593,0.2091126478177984,0.0,0.12188222017318645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3868025659817432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482540073418062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19111695511977966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29621673490102385,0.0,0.10740675975321763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18770864255009734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615157310977934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012670342409368,0.12806378477299432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19226967664917846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18912540776677172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4326942014936133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511116845903125,0.12109647032505985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217214964706764,0.17913940037686127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147056286381662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CuriousMommyBlogger,2020/01/10,"Looking for a bomb new blog to read? I incorporate being a mom, a failed suicide attempt, and my lifestyle all in one! I know its hard for most and my only goal is to connect and spread awareness about mental health. Especially in this era. Check out my blog at: www.tianiangela.com 

Trust me... you are NOT alone.",2.6085467980295576,5.465619017241384,3.5103940886699547,84.65258620689656,82.9655172413793,5.383251231527094,23.802955665024644,6.868970318607317,0.9303714285714286,245,9,46,3,7,78,47,58,0.196,0.726,0.078,-0.8249,0,1,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,8,5,3,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,7,1,9,4,2,6,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,1,2,31,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3186101757279605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755745607867539,0.0,0.0,0.32699453118351396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16906448589319106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583303204020893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31001700333686744,0.0,0.0,0.3602905840079226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971093596509383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20845691900275315,0.2339652084754047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307711580234998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364954647150141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,msszenzy,2020/01/10,"Should I tell my parents about my mental health problems? Hello everyone, this is my first time posting here.

I've always had downs and suicidal thoughts in my past and managed them with university resource psychologists or hotlines. Since I moved away from home, I started feeling worse and got diagnosed with cyclothymia (and started to see a regular psychologist). I am not sure if the diagnosis is right, but I know I am unusually and have always been unusually anxious. 

These past couple of months I had a big breakdown, my anxiety got to weird levels like constant tremors, difficulty breathing for days, muscle spasms while swallowing etc. I was out of function for a couple of weeks, but now it's a little better. Still, my psychologist seems to think I might find benefit in medication, so I started a medication for the first time in my life yesterday.

Now, I have a dilemma. Should I tell my parents? 

The main problem is that they live far away and the option of visiting them is not feasible for me (they are oversea, and the journey is about 26 hours and with how anxious I feel I wouldn't survive a flight that long), nor for them to come to me. I feel like my mother would want to know everything and I would feel great comfort in telling them especially because I am terrified of medication, which is why I am thinking about it now.

On the other side, I don't want them to worry, as they are so far away from me. And I sort of feel awful at throwing this on them (we had a hard year, as we lost two of my grandparents about eight and six months ago).

Part of me also feels that once it's out, I can't pull it back again. Maybe this is not real and I am taking useless medication for something that's only in my mind, maybe it's not cyclothymia, and I got this particularly strong anti anxiety medication for nothing.

Long story short: My mental health recently took a turn to the worse and I started medication. Should I tell it to my oversea parents?",6.364727823755686,6.950349536193031,6.805560088588416,75.1550448770253,65.7024128686327,9.811353304580956,34.4479543070288,9.761364909221204,3.3019365660333366,1559,68,286,31,23,508,183,373,0.151,0.767,0.081,-0.9764,4,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,2,0,9,6,15,13,0,0,16,1,30,12,1,1,1,60,57,26,1,11,8,4,7,2,0,7,10,0,1,0,17,22,1,0,13,0,0,7,8,5,0,5,11,8,53,8,49,39,3,59,0,2,1,0,21,22,0,6,31,208,70,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441834048008308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05811486752247608,0.12093596876366895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111860314430666,0.16419479360258266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20483002024323474,0.055879412400613136,0.0,0.044299487112625484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427147791629309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259951875097579,0.0,0.07853139237149301,0.0,0.0,0.16081786820588032,0.0,0.046866698463715016,0.0,0.0,0.07375940212017029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104722838635907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944012937812713,0.06531189103094648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204674486772905,0.051916083189597007,0.0,0.0,0.06641985753755306,0.12362760775124805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436459716382705,0.08011988940046745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509882442966332,0.0,0.0,0.15449147057843268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289480662483239,0.0,0.07156616733423002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987601796791949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051329583764922214,0.07100663149463911,0.07283530185781023,0.06416970854064437,0.12862286413465324,0.0,0.0,0.07932883779361051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14601531067242335,0.0,0.0,0.43924952970482173,0.1464702867552001,0.07709230771247848,0.07337686134994187,0.0,0.11601038830802216,0.0772376328299257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972965855582353,0.0,0.0,0.07739210354925376,0.0,0.055269470395621696,0.0,0.0,0.24207719934793176,0.07869546918373617,0.13874513429573235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959860422492037,0.0,0.0,0.1390724140489042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271535836998757,0.0,0.0,0.07175371585906115,0.0,0.0,0.0620605248865865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05790927370288253,0.066156829626719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011409362971928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594558517810058,0.0,0.0,0.2057472598804529,0.0,0.058035049694848136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949013550569219,0.0,0.0684914338176823,0.0,0.054639449334863935,0.0,0.2540701697105093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312911680933353,0.0,0.05769255241077385,0.08474993599948683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074000914257977,0.0,0.07904503728689953,0.07098887932538707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572632250866065,0.0,0.058292187510500124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06557415585959661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380079479225651,0.14811564750228784,0.1032466003299872,0.0,0.0,0.046797656897869584
mentalhealth,ronnieratedr,2020/01/10,"Do I need help or I'm just sad? Hi, I'm 23 M working at a job that I love but a workplace that I hate. Recently I was rejected for another job and it's just 1 of many in the past year. Every time I go for an interview it feels like a waste of time.

I lost my hair in a span of a few months. Was in love with a friend of mine for 2 years, gathered some strength to finally ask her out and we are not talking anymore.

I just drink all night with my best friend, talk to him about it and the next day I  forget that something happened. But that's the thing right now I don't feel bad about the job rejection, I feel bad about anything remotely bad happened to me in the past few years. And my coping strategy is I'd again drink and forget that anything happened by Monday until I'm stressed for something else.

Can anyone who's been in a remotely similar situation tell me that it's just sadness or if I need some help.

Thanks in advance.

PS: Pardon my grammar",1.3267795726941145,3.189147623762377,3.043444502344972,92.17860083376759,80.1881188118812,6.430849400729548,24.492965085982284,7.475848149327749,1.0345306930693066,748,28,168,11,19,248,113,202,0.146,0.626,0.228,0.9693,3,1,4,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,0,5,9,18,1,1,13,0,8,5,1,0,1,29,26,11,0,3,10,0,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,12,9,2,0,3,2,0,2,2,10,0,0,4,4,21,8,26,22,6,29,0,5,0,2,17,10,0,5,18,103,33,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051401408711708,0.0,0.0,0.11397957160791568,0.08036165367519962,0.0,0.1891550191115816,0.0,0.10744393587604886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878849809376639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206118324475123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412027329029584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22517508240816111,0.0,0.0,0.09600917840227187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683339202309707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743360219861295,0.0821059387648967,0.0,0.12590008042320566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758910099435002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531730694453684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30489637535153624,0.0,0.0,0.113469475662173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407016977285254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3421505554941292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056148940551900665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545955507440446,0.0,0.20745743180071605,0.0,0.0,0.11652087288489126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917359443674192,0.0,0.0,0.17043811927778607,0.0,0.0,0.12222924541640015,0.10785391933341973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194271755596437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347940442584074,0.0,0.0,0.09814950094456408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918601548591485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17695729371663702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165180451134487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18475258959653992,0.1004537925177013,0.10581200446767887,0.0,0.0,0.07635431427887295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403309009446085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367033115864114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22203324955572126
mentalhealth,altthrowaway738293,2020/01/10,"Birthdays suck! As if I wasn’t depressed enough, not one family member has made any slight bit of effort for my birthday. I get I’m 22 now but at least one card would have been nice. My partner didn’t even make a card with our son for me. People suck, family suck and birthdays suck the hardest!",1.7819999999999998,3.975891866666668,2.666666666666668,93.755,80.33333333333334,5.333333333333334,20.0,6.42735559955562,0.06850000000000023,232,6,49,2,6,73,48,60,0.239,0.7070000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.9106,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,0,1,2,6,4,0,2,0,6,0,0,2,0,8,14,4,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,4,0,6,1,6,9,3,2,0,1,0,0,3,1,4,1,1,30,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972090099517568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31660339027748113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497753913751812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29964610186587337,0.0,0.1915413572318442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5467697901840657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15151231267571955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744037115095793,0.19357633453014667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39302114799378746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20104853282724952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20600670322933973,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myfeedconsumption,2020/01/10,"I'm dying soon. Vent. Sodium Nitrite is coming in the mail over the next week.

My brain constantly reflects and ruminates on past events and people.

Events from 8, 6, 5, 4 years ago still affect me in 2020.

Three counsellors have called me aspergers, which is likely true, which leaves me disadvantaged sexually and socially.

EMDR therapy hasn't done me any good.

It is overwhelming, uncontrollable, and I'm sick of it. Can't wait to leave the world.

:-)",3.631287262872634,6.550675109756099,4.368211382113824,79.97258807588078,78.39024390243901,8.52249322493225,23.74525745257453,9.150863307647796,2.3938655826558266,357,12,63,10,9,114,65,82,0.096,0.8009999999999999,0.10300000000000001,-0.0905,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,3,0,7,2,1,1,1,9,11,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,1,0,5,3,7,10,0,16,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,11,33,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004108355289856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374564807859334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523857872307598,0.23085820590736275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19475232927607514,0.0,0.2443177182636609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346406812152401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313635934376453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18962948900470725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4787830385621904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11045377946626246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404441114088613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215823848321474,0.15673896939261256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304653287900663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18055188495435948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585480612546522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813518621673217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559141775160406
mentalhealth,katyyo,2020/01/10,Does anyone has any POSITIVE stories relating to them dealing with their borderline personality order? This is something I really need to hear. Hearing how you improved things for yourself would also be great!,8.202254901960789,11.506619029411766,7.918235294117648,58.478725490196105,64.58823529411765,10.415686274509804,40.74509803921568,10.504223727775694,5.756698039215688,173,10,20,5,3,55,33,34,0.0,0.7170000000000001,0.28300000000000003,0.9157,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,7,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,4,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22198874531867702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887708232289086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940974894932197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861832591292021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429210138165253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060441240135714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6257285548567769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20582958135400786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423810147268379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17783136031829044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21370246185285602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844185632790081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19719208046726214,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asthecrowruns,2020/01/10,"Self harm urges but riddled with guilt I used to self harm while depressed, and I’m just over 4 years clean, however after going through some rough times again recently, I’m starting to have intrusive thoughts about self harm. 

90% of the time I wouldn’t go through with it and have an easy time dismissing it out of my mind, but sometimes I linger on the thoughts and get mild-moderate urges to self harm that will stay in my head for a few hours. Even if I can’t or don’t want to self harm, they linger. 

My problem is that I feel immensely guilty about even having these thoughts again, and while there are distraction methods like drawing on your skin or using an elastic band or such, I feel like that’s almost cheating and if I did such, I wouldn’t be clean. It’s become so long since I’ve done it that if I ever did it again I don’t know how I’d cope thinking the last four years have been a waste of time. If I used these coping strategies, it’s so close to self harm that I may as well just do it. 

How do I either get the thoughts out of my head, or stop feeling guilty for having other coping mechanisms?",8.128289473684212,5.569881214912282,7.1721754385964935,84.25089473684213,63.605263157894726,10.523508771929826,34.20350877192982,8.238735603445708,2.2840898245614034,879,26,196,8,10,268,120,228,0.22699999999999998,0.6829999999999999,0.09,-0.9906,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,0,18,14,1,2,8,0,21,3,3,5,1,47,41,22,0,8,13,0,5,2,0,4,0,0,2,6,15,10,0,1,9,1,0,2,5,11,1,1,8,5,19,3,25,28,3,29,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,11,21,125,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048507533505558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564265992809315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018554917334724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071534721603807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383183699263226,0.09471511811778237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883176946740285,0.07480399856117136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941206857851736,0.0,0.11901686548373434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149229059520034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311709107074968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057545226508359075,0.08535165975640746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023108762030597,0.0,0.0,0.09266400653266448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572605430958606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019219499302916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338732292800253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.655404782915864,0.0,0.0,0.08661621403451156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355969571400242,0.0,0.07411343839179664,0.1116056651422617,0.0,0.08754125812835753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709318087775623,0.0,0.3325084129914177,0.24422620895388805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713043917038222,0.0,0.0,0.06175997216674986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414579996409482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13485808805992092
mentalhealth,felili_zhang,2020/01/10,"Horrible experience seeking mental help Hi I just want to share my struggles with seeking mental help. Below is a review I wrote for a counseling provider called Thriveworks. Hopefully people will be better informed when they are researching for psychologists / therapists. 

(Hope this isn’t against the rules)

—————————-

“
After seeing so many HORRIFIC reviews, I had my doubts but I was desperate enough to schedule an appointment with a professional from Thriveworks  and pay the $99 new membership fee plus the $29 subscription fee for that month. I just wanted to get better, and I thought what others have experienced CANNOT POSSIBLY HAPPEN TO ME RIGHT?

A week before my appointment, I called them once again to double check all the details, so I can protect myself from all the ""scams"" and confusions that others have experienced.

20 minutes before my appointment, I showed up at the location, and the office was locked with its lights out. That's when I knew my suspicions had been correct. I immediately called the office and, after sooo many transferred calls, I was told that my therapist is at a different location.

After all this confusion, my original appointment time had passed, and I was afraid that I would be charged the insane $99 late fee, as reported by other users. I called Thriveworks and they were able to confirm that I would not be charged for being late, but I informed them that I would be canceling my subscription. Sadly, from reading these reviews, I am expecting them to renege on this confirmation and still charge me 1) $99 for being late, and 2) $29 for the monthly fee every month, so I will be preemptively paying attention to my bank account.

What's funny though is, right after I ended that call, I got a call from one of their other offices accusing me of missing my appointment and penalizing me with the $99 charge. I explained my situation and said my piece, that ""the actions of this company has been extremely unethical and dangerous, capitalizing on people's mental health, giving them hope and taking it away"". And the person over the phone, speechless that they got called out, replied with a ""... oh ... ok bye"" and hung up in a very rude manner.

This entire experience has been so horrendous that it's almost comical. I'm glad that I did my research and went in mentally guarded so that I'm not too gutted by this.

It has taken me years to even WANT to get better, and it had taken me months of research and contacting local hospitals, psychologists, and therapists to find and set up this appointment. Only recently, I became so excited at the prospect of getting better and I felt so much hope for the first time, but it all vanished within seconds because of Thriveworks. They position themselves as professionals who care, but go on and abuse people at their most desperate and vulnerable state. There's nothing more DESPICABLE and DANGEROUS than this. I'm so lucky that I'm in a stable enough place to not do anything drastic after feeling such hopelessness.

It will take me a while to muster the strength to advocate for my mental health again, but I do hope that others who have horrific experiences with Thriveworks will not lose hope and will continue on their journey to get better. Please seek help RELENTLESSLY, do not stop until you are taking advantage of all that life has to offer, and I will try to do the same.
“",8.439287721678454,8.686428831960463,8.168693187324353,68.29515432696968,61.33937397034597,11.62223083632135,36.96332008915593,11.20814326018867,4.391379145266014,2699,116,439,68,34,864,279,607,0.128,0.723,0.149,0.8664,2,0,0,0,1,1,80.0,0,1,11,9,21,31,3,5,29,1,49,4,1,1,6,86,88,47,0,13,12,0,2,0,0,9,3,1,0,1,41,35,0,3,9,3,9,5,7,12,0,3,24,7,62,19,75,48,13,62,0,4,1,0,39,24,0,12,32,330,103,13,0.06026999357668701,0.07141008696609162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060351692584517426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495970693773488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05662564293216496,0.0,0.0,0.03674002867849288,0.0,0.1025706508779612,0.0,0.0,0.2665195576475131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4923392162484013,0.0,0.061449275235941216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296931547340684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05338132522709407,0.12455002909907632,0.0,0.03980776233755467,0.0,0.05078006901186692,0.0,0.0,0.17686685586913564,0.0,0.0,0.030474319663057282,0.0,0.057868645430745075,0.0,0.05508568224609597,0.05126562574738948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12595433636627876,0.05781646970007893,0.034252826272178245,0.0,0.09640683926394096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053296556275153874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812836964011878,0.0,0.0,0.12119311877254133,0.0,0.0,0.3591702163529206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039615337919259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04257047885867897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742670634501215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220862747442368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3036898893576262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19242773545453,0.0,0.04430538003320623,0.0,0.0,0.058209135362465775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783068432754682,0.0,0.0,0.06418557615937047,0.04084050744725674,0.045838045984995766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535087453850371,0.052625433669139285,0.06296931547340684,0.06615835420781127,0.0,0.06794536202477508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06028630349289867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059509347630776574,0.0,0.0,0.10294049040968116,0.057330565581084486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0480273816982461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774599799393716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04813169472426678,0.05038841334177703,0.0,0.0630072833049163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594660342926382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20993432355564806,0.0,0.0,0.05921496268162346,0.04784764267627797,0.07028783586603116,0.0,0.0,0.05759056167635716,0.0,0.04091936941228811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04972905668511371,0.10664641125965588,0.0,0.04834495341724805,0.0,0.0,0.05587088786481606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844222261885485,0.0,0.0,0.038811899834027185
mentalhealth,yvnghxnvh,2020/01/10,Is lowering expectations to avoid disappointment unhealthy? I started to notice that I have been subconsciously doing this for some reason. I don’t want to seek like a pessimist; I’m only wondering if this is something that I should or shouldn’t be doing. Thank you!,5.863125,8.31541572916667,6.298333333333333,71.28,68.79166666666666,8.966666666666667,30.75,9.516144504307137,3.262649999999999,217,9,34,5,4,70,36,48,0.263,0.615,0.121,-0.8122,1,1,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,10,0,0,1,0,10,15,2,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,5,2,4,11,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,2,27,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18965601724577852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4419708503395549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29524531469454274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3991365821965615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29885706853067906,0.0,0.0,0.2747715603936577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3574044879009421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289717531713529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4209887955064289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway67854321807,2020/01/10,"I need help and don't know where to seek it The past few years have been a total mental train wreck for me. (Not going into to much detail for personal reasons.) I feel like a have no one to talk to about my problems. I'd go to my parents like everyone else does but my mom always says ""you make me feel like I raised you as a bad parent."" And stuff along those lines and I habe no really close freinds due to moving 20-30 times as a kid. I'm 19 and I honestly don't who I can talk to, it makes me feel bad about myself. I also just sometimes here loud ringing noises in my ear and I lose all feeling. I don't know if this is related not but it certainly don't help.",0.4771921182266041,2.226101827586209,2.609285714285715,94.80250000000002,82.44827586206897,5.798029556650246,18.633004926108374,6.868970318607317,-0.020527093596058855,515,12,122,6,14,174,93,145,0.157,0.725,0.11800000000000001,-0.7848,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,0,1,6,9,0,0,5,0,9,1,1,3,3,28,21,11,0,3,6,3,4,3,0,0,0,4,0,2,7,8,0,0,7,0,0,3,8,4,0,1,1,8,19,5,16,20,4,11,0,1,0,0,13,4,0,1,7,77,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227792757453525,0.12775070553695386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25638517711217185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435665892387186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825606668791747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467061555188549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31052104023185306,0.2193662092093369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17451125016929542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20581817590617096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16875405646809724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22502355661373133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17176274339474748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20496725517828834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472388127756118,0.0,0.0,0.17981451644731672,0.0,0.16317994040812525,0.1128634933272744,0.11384183864517733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040370793863247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409576525193236,0.0,0.14656341680064355,0.0,0.1340579919935291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469091387541954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09835636303699363,0.15785619777115778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220946007047062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184681509422102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17575710834483438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24680599132695585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895255913425046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886940580700336
mentalhealth,MikeTheBig13,2020/01/10,"My wife act like two different people and I don’t know what to do. Hi everyone. 

I’m new to the sub (form South Africa) and am posting to ask if I can have any advice on an issue that I am experiencing with my wife. It is getting so difficult to deal with because I don’t understand what the issue is. If anyone could just point me in the right direction or give me any advice I would really appreciate it. 

My wife (of 1 year - I am 25 and she is 23 soon) is the most loving, kind, selfless and amazing person I have ever known. However lately she snaps into what appears to be a different person - one who is unkind with her words, cruel towards me, self-deprecating and self-loathing, selfish and not herself. She has always been fairly shy since I’ve known her and reserved in big groups, but with me she is open and her real self and I love her to bits. 

A bit of background - she grew up in a house with a verbally and sometimes physically abusive mother and a dad who travelled for months at a time. Her mom was overbearing and wouldn’t let her do anything for herself. She would constantly take her phone in her teenage years and would snap at her for any normal teenage behavior that she deemed inappropriate. I believe her mother is bipolar, because she can also be the sweetest and kindest person but appears to have two different personalities for weeks at a time (I thought perhaps this is what my wife had too, but it doesn’t seem to be the same at all). 

When my wife was 16, she went to a party with a friend and was raped by 3 guys. She has cut herself and self harmed on and off ever since. She had previously not been able to remember any of it but after a recent trauma that I experienced where I ended up in hospital on my deathbed, she now remembers everything about the rape vividly. We have spoken about it since and she has never told anyone about it save for me. Her mother suspected something at the time and took her to the gynecologist to examine her hymen (when I found this out I wanted to kill her mother) and because my wife was too scared to tell her what had happened, her mother punished her severely for sleeping around. 

I am not sure if it is her childhood that has caused her to be the way she is now or the trauma she faced at 16 that has now “resurfaced” that has caused this change in her, but it has gotten very bad since I was in hospital (about 3 months ago escalating until now). 

What happens is that out of the blue she will start acting strangely with me. She will be distant at first, but then she starts becoming a mean person. She will say ugly things about me or herself. She will cancel plans, make rash decisions or outright have fits of anger hitting walls and smashing things. 

I asked her about it today in a kind way and she said the following:


“I feel like i have something else inside me making decisions for me. And until that thing goes away by itself there’s nothing I can do about it. I don’t know. It’s so stupid when i say it out loud. I just feel useless and angry, like it brings out everything i hate about myself and everything i hate about other people. That’s why when I say something ugly, i have no feeling while saying it. It doesn’t affect me or I don’t feel bad about it. I guess there’s nothing I can do about it. It doesn’t just fade. It just has a sudden stop. Then I’m back to normal”

“I get this rage in me, if i know people will notice hurt marks on me then i want to hit and break things around me. I’ll even just hit the floor so it won’t cause damage. I say ugly things to you. I cancel ok things in the moment because something about it makes me angry and that people don’t deserve to have me around them and give my perfect personality everyone thinks I have. I feel lazy like it took all my energy for my brain to make me behave this way. I can’t fall asleep because of it, and I can’t wake up because of it”

“Every moment i wonder when it will happen again. But sometimes, when i am with you, when we keep busy and when we are away from everything. It doesn’t even appear once. Do you know why i am this way? I feel really guilty and you don’t deserve this. Please I want to get better”

My heart breaks for her and it’s taking a toll on our relationship. Please - any advice, suggestions, explanations or support on this would be greatly appreciated.",4.297073217726396,5.265249700578039,5.1201300578034665,84.03144749518306,70.49132947976878,7.89383429672447,26.324181117533715,8.131152278815165,1.5004493256262037,3401,103,690,46,60,1106,334,865,0.17,0.748,0.08199999999999999,-0.9984,4,0,4,0,0,0,83.0,4,4,1,4,48,40,11,1,30,1,86,12,7,8,7,139,147,67,1,15,25,13,6,4,1,12,1,7,0,9,61,52,0,2,25,1,0,13,19,23,0,4,18,17,128,17,101,106,7,116,0,3,2,4,101,47,0,17,53,506,189,0,0.05098447130932108,0.06040826145910059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14946430587411666,0.045194657588744136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04077226328588193,0.04242316441019581,0.0,0.0,0.17335594411177982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129905557496233,0.0,0.04195587572907862,0.1361609664027602,0.0953271965529904,0.0,0.095803178202546,0.03920391135326988,0.08513980784098757,0.18647796293645005,0.056308342914669914,0.0,0.057442039990986724,0.0,0.04509162166398066,0.11132367561496212,0.0,0.0,0.05691553155822299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15712528906097414,0.053934810345618665,0.0,0.0,0.05509610092011427,0.0,0.0407069516963044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05256275119928743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598037630800412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04259098359447151,0.0,0.0451571085872334,0.0,0.0,0.06734952490761133,0.09223674643069918,0.04295661602031962,0.09743569445514844,0.18328622126051936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467568363570044,0.036423316490558036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04336736525027927,0.0,0.055901841212233114,0.039390476061132114,0.0,0.07991184585800787,0.0978179012705294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05621055960952174,0.056165143187337584,0.05048264236338845,0.13525619880009118,0.0,0.0,0.1006732201405139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06041684398220384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05882923458480562,0.0545799310225452,0.0,0.0,0.10642908373086184,0.0,0.04531734069467694,0.056406763525891385,0.10618496233366403,0.11207892828995272,0.0,0.05751270436417163,0.0,0.0,0.05213507621739608,0.0,0.0996337494264556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203095184664556,0.0,0.13613012199951915,0.0,0.0,0.0555370358657802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059712396597119174,0.08139063715774171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03932236736670525,0.04924112009489216,0.0,0.0,0.09990791370978833,0.09784195056017757,0.05804615850846261,0.0,0.05429679799128912,0.03454839724768448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413848514490573,0.26710604270739313,0.0,0.11193127829649484,0.04819680502479701,0.0,0.048829030104746665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05803149027127855,0.06532391570550354,0.0,0.050341014605505816,0.05473824178047005,0.1155109343295312,0.04354045992374179,0.04849790754161593,0.20272448976004565,0.051044350093562965,0.0,0.0,0.04641434783717968,0.21275169150259204,0.057597940426745285,0.0,0.1686995261042381,0.0,0.05102129168475589,0.0,0.0,0.15700134755926665,0.10084989158894853,0.0,0.07217414241674229,0.0,0.0,0.0426253009480951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05785657384849763,0.048052260832601466,0.0,0.07666795465773305,0.0,0.044562675155885086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20323090360337756,0.032668790552290834,0.0,0.04047597519889163,0.08918836568016741,0.0,0.04832731734348144,0.04871784722757423,0.11329124717328505,0.0,0.0,0.09960884027155267,0.053076632696956484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042067528355976165,0.0902158864210197,0.16187640077416068,0.040896667548436086,0.0,0.0,0.047263115695301054,0.09201111045888236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05529048428302176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487162240878862,0.0,0.0,0.0656646558632992
mentalhealth,mehkayluhh,2020/01/10,"F18, I want short hair so when I feel too depressed to brush my hair it won’t be so bad.. I want short hair so when I feel too depressed to brush my hair it won’t be so bad.. it’s easier to get up and actually care for myself when I don’t have to worry so much. Is this normal and should I cut it?",2.6219565217391287,1.7426337681159438,4.647644927536233,92.46538043478265,73.63768115942028,8.059420289855073,21.597826086956523,7.1686216300943375,0.19572173913043445,226,3,62,2,4,79,36,69,0.162,0.7140000000000001,0.124,-0.5770000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,10,6,1,0,0,0,8,4,4,0,0,8,14,10,0,4,0,0,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,8,9,1,6,9,1,6,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,41,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.27100123353742755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.463746226174891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831400228649191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4783759602965777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2808332411752888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509005005247408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20414604187721455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720931554981505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275966744558033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28202416992395635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nerdypoliticaldude,2020/01/10,"20 year old looking for advice regarding boundary issues... big mental health impact 
My parents have always been controlling, but since entering college in the Fall of 2018 things have gone way too far. To put the change in perspective, during high school I had a great deal of friends, participated in multiple organizations, and was the captain of a varsity sports team. 

I attend a university roughly 15 minutes from home, and originally had a dormitory on campus. Move in day happened, but from that day my mom would not let go. She would constantly text. My father would walk around outside the dorm complex. My level of privacy was near zero. I couldn’t go anywhere without them spying on me thanks to Find my iPhone. After about a month of this I gave in and left the dorm to live back at home. 

Academically, my father seems to have a set path for me. I have limited role in choosing my courses even though I explain time and time again about expanding my knowledge in diverse fields. I have spoken to my mother about this, but she doesn’t make any effort to convince him to change his ways. I explain I need to take the courses that will lead me to a good job/graduate program in my field. But to no avail. 

Currently, I live at home and commute to school. Because roughly 95 percent of the students live on campus I have found it nearly impossible to find friends. When I mention to them the possibility of social plans they make excuses for me not to go. And, at this point my only social life consists of seeing extended family members on the weekends and attending class  for a couple hours each day. 

I do maintain friendships from high school, but as you all know, those friends get busy and can’t be there to chat all the time. I am asking for any advice on what to do in this situation. Leaving the house likely isn’t a real possibility, and I don’t want to lose my relationship with my parents. 

It is time for me to gain freedom. I am trustworthy. I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I maintain a 4.0 GPA at what I would deem a prestigious university. Thank you all for reading. 

TLDR: 20 year old guy with over controlling parents. Persuaded not to socialize. Important decisions are made for me. Need advice on how to move forward.",4.7972806261668826,6.644966111374411,5.559358035329602,77.98136938101396,70.35071090047393,8.432687060175212,30.79735746086457,9.0124134603493,2.7396973143759857,1777,76,318,35,33,578,225,422,0.025,0.855,0.121,0.9928,5,0,2,0,0,0,50.0,0,2,3,9,12,10,0,0,22,0,31,3,0,8,3,54,55,18,0,8,9,7,2,1,3,5,2,0,5,1,12,13,1,3,11,6,0,14,12,1,0,1,9,4,48,9,70,38,5,68,0,1,2,0,35,31,0,1,23,214,60,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22673509027354505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435529845056419,0.0,0.0,0.10519133757793547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885137520183736,0.07230495732596592,0.0,0.0,0.059471740277884176,0.0,0.04714737465594093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16363658227403058,0.0,0.0,0.08357995136553728,0.1734927652562048,0.0,0.08557819489417337,0.0,0.14963887408479926,0.07973689817443015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576637337250752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0510841050660915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291178733509564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413796010755503,0.0,0.0,0.08480224719598432,0.17926426834967873,0.0,0.040408353639076085,0.0,0.13186686766724845,0.06487136332609766,0.0,0.08527056833305431,0.0,0.07658140454718528,0.06839386894782351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221164306022764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634335576188085,0.23274301684412774,0.0,0.07616695189762278,0.08924305864400613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072565475188329,0.0767506672583754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04250550955120273,0.0,0.0,0.0818947216805765,0.0840330388476112,0.0790881216986036,0.05462941614979935,0.03778572254824097,0.0,0.20488498765932905,0.0,0.06494836478048581,0.08652666587942369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318350580712259,0.10325366755627094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794322164558855,0.0,0.0,0.0905828020524205,0.061734182470711524,0.16440603943392645,0.0,0.11469722177075738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16231624652820806,0.0,0.0,0.05882258684288805,0.0,0.0,0.2576396513192365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311382389449968,0.1743844822522344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775074701086457,0.0,0.0,0.07736360148965596,0.08803289259208527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303708446592592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23482473795023115,0.0616320955676504,0.07040986331354647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397865707241847,0.08693640325682515,0.0,0.2365233406968337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05815206352695978,0.0,0.0,0.1424134811374854,0.0,0.0,0.051383034236164665,0.0,0.07598878202352526,0.0,0.180396534816586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04561871150918957,0.12278202520673498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455557531195921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21976805895446871,0.0,0.0,0.09961228928789152
mentalhealth,CuriousBetsy69,2020/01/10,"Emotional numbness 

I’ve got an appointment with a psychiatrist because I’ve been emotionally numb/ awkward/ sluggish/ and almost disabled mentally for the last couple years. I can function but I’m just simply weird. Does anyone else have or has anyone else had a similar situation?? I’m so scared to get on meds for them making me more sluggish, overweight, impotent , unhealthy, or not helping.’im hoping I don’t have to take meds permanently if I choose too. Can anyone give me motivation for seeing a doctor and share stories about there experience? I feel like my brain is just shrunk and needs to grow some new neurons or something. I became depressed after abusing drugs severely. I’m sober now but have just been in a fuckin weird place ever since. It’s hard for me to hold down a job or even focus on reading a book. Do you guys think medication can help for this kind of depression? I’m super scared. How can I force myself to listen to doctors when I don’t trust them? Please share experiences with depression/numbness/ medication

Thanks in advance",4.741156930126003,7.398069278350519,5.2793127147766326,76.40895761741128,72.71134020618555,7.8162657502863695,29.33447880870561,8.680891452615391,2.669673310423826,856,36,140,17,18,274,132,194,0.235,0.622,0.14300000000000002,-0.9728,1,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,2,3,12,18,1,3,8,0,15,11,2,3,1,28,31,13,0,3,11,0,2,1,0,0,8,1,0,1,2,5,1,1,4,2,0,2,3,10,0,0,4,4,15,8,21,27,2,15,0,2,1,1,9,6,1,8,8,85,17,6,0.0,0.1396898887998036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805784846634225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473111352047623,0.2416009321537875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186954586734005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161319465770066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045192967952365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030908039842796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24134726253538846,0.10317336208884052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13672428668696615,0.0,0.19697735437111075,0.2652388341642708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787053805077264,0.1066455195112967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306537958282382,0.0,0.0,0.05961278729437078,0.08422637744227937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06159685552971365,0.11309853504360283,0.0,0.0,0.0942938261839336,0.0,0.0,0.11673758733871994,0.0,0.0,0.1056134789182285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902456550093298,0.0,0.0,0.11709934761822645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273501056982673,0.0,0.11699560455122188,0.0,0.0,0.12277265743397965,0.0,0.09610263152028503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05759902305544806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869785168909102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261916270140216,0.2375397269805041,0.11881348609513755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741989666513925,0.0,0.11386665373725975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317834986612927,0.12941663475155102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11792993663588505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360729945276004,0.0,0.09394946699840027,0.0,0.0,0.13319121754161398,0.0,0.09752647019164623,0.13252232742551362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076366482100298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864464728800497,0.0,0.0,0.10854466753906904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554429823416285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592246701084092
mentalhealth,akiro394,2020/01/10,"I need mental help. Lately I have been having suicidal thoughts and been skipping a lot of days of schools to just lay in bed all day and I cant bring myself to eat or drink some days or even get out of bed for a few days. I am always paranoid about how people view me in school or in public so I am slowly just starting to lose interest with real socialising and resorting to spending my days in my room all the time. I am scared and I don't know why I have been feeling like this, can someone give some advice on what I should do.",5.481726190476189,4.558607053571432,6.1239285714285705,84.40440476190479,67.75,8.895238095238097,29.380952380952376,7.793537801064563,1.6407095238095242,418,12,92,4,6,137,76,112,0.107,0.807,0.086,-0.5267,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,1,3,0,14,2,0,1,2,23,22,9,1,2,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,2,6,2,0,3,1,1,1,2,2,0,0,4,2,13,2,16,17,6,16,0,1,1,0,3,7,0,6,9,66,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692750991605336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14413846811601416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.558584364211455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16969619060982633,0.0,0.17725413168060422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144145832057655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758861031077353,0.1237531691858429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050378652350936,0.16617480849765473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11611018687081295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520084873675637,0.0,0.19540723139145566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462980198816003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937963364528066,0.0,0.14727112200508516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745717421643563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284453824411934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009356318655202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971698770349428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17343011844480485,0.3506292806633085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14677439715851115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261073013021208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894818634895146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752262806844898,0.10100986557413737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631012791692234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Awupisc,2020/01/10,"Can medicine used to treat Mental illness have long term side effects When I was younger I was given Ritalin because they (pyschatrist) thought I had adhd turns out I didn't and I started having vivid and horrible hallucinations. I was put in a psych ward etc. 

Well fast forward to 2019. I was put on Latuda for my bipolar. Latuda was an absolute nightmare for me. The only way I can describe what I felt while taking Latuda was , restless yet tired and energy less. unable to think clearly (mind going a thousand miles per hour, my thoughts getting mixed up together) thankfully I stopped taking it and was put on Seroquel 2 months after I stopped taking Latuda. (SEROQUEL works amazing for me) But I still feel the effects of Latuda (unable to think clearly /getting my thoughts mixed up) Which never ever ever happened to me before I took Latuda.  My therapist kind of talked about it a little bit and told me it was possible. since psych meds can be known to have long term effects. 

It puts me into a panic attack when I start to think about the long term effects. because I don't want my mind to jumble up thoughts together forever. I want to be able to think clearly like I was able to before Latuda.  I know my therapist already told me this can happen. but I don't see her again till Monday. and idk what to do. (I'm not suicidal or anything) I just don't want this to be another burden.",3.2159485251590496,5.688693642857146,4.103759398496241,83.86279930595722,76.85714285714286,6.197570850202429,27.899942163100057,7.321109707123232,1.7608101792943898,1103,47,194,14,26,354,141,266,0.092,0.825,0.083,0.1852,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,1,5,11,10,1,2,8,0,25,4,0,5,6,43,58,13,1,3,5,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,9,8,0,2,16,0,0,7,6,4,1,1,20,4,34,6,30,35,6,44,0,0,2,0,5,12,0,1,27,130,43,3,0.1881739828158098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130742797988806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038273346398756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865841408709324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742557719748791,0.0,0.0,0.10703753556558447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470911335675488,0.0,0.16012219970753205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271862630030293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493186619278078,0.0,0.1702141406207289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047573209853615975,0.0,0.09033826656214647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831313942653527,0.0,0.05347180545268021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664016315498989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265673415563098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797712305501197,0.051707749890387136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04596615148439552,0.09429988293024562,0.0,0.2497920799531237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450943706027213,0.0,0.09481755784261764,0.0,0.19000208027136506,0.0,0.0750993388995321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256568805281083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155739668792108,0.0,0.1103908122424005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606894598218086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3783336534653815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074975150668258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782973156076077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319051356320444,0.0,0.0751379928754743,0.15732187550720292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029158976636044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21222512480456948,0.0756235597417825,0.0,0.08662266070244172,0.0,0.21848449755761365,0.0,0.24114858011192844,0.0,0.2987782462358067,0.0,0.10813915586782176,0.0,0.17980830459938088,0.10453410936355988,0.0,0.10233962889208824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126095178573475,0.0,0.0,0.1664848357268184,0.07468187439062726,0.0,0.0,0.0845955046691265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849645031561415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Littlewillywilly69,2020/01/10,"I fucking hate my life I lost every good relationship I’ve ever had, I’m boring af, I do nothing but sit on my ass, get drunk, watch tv, and work. I used to be so fun when I was young, wtf happened to me? 

Nowadays couldn’t get laid if I paid for it, I’m hopelessly addicted to cocaine, alcohol and benzodiazepines, and I can’t seem to extract the slightest bit of enjoyment out of anything anymore besides finding my next high or drinking and pill-popping myself into a near coma and sleeping all day. 

Fuck, my life sucks right now. I’d just like to go to bed and never wake up.",3.1672504708097904,4.46535813559322,4.823333333333334,83.8340018832392,73.57627118644069,7.278342749529191,30.060263653484,7.793537801064563,1.9776015065913368,452,20,91,6,9,153,90,118,0.22699999999999998,0.6559999999999999,0.11599999999999999,-0.9347,0,0,3,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,0,2,5,11,4,0,2,0,6,12,3,1,3,19,20,11,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,8,3,0,2,3,1,1,3,7,0,0,4,1,13,4,14,14,2,16,0,2,1,3,1,7,4,3,8,52,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204588156841705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005623085537834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861183532188577,0.0,0.0,0.1544365370192538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048871898330301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210317165638785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18384529320698464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697583885110938,0.15812018948387827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17152711061826054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.346996045945839,0.1960998076617219,0.0,0.10665726703225814,0.15740881185888742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16595608751725255,0.0,0.0,0.1852854125781276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19828380970913076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651139438971896,0.0916861522032386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20486413009466947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474278365029936,0.0,0.1995893259744812,0.0,0.0,0.18007456354021734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014874998125578,0.0,0.1602692765673313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084784963773506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780567596594866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620867475959172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662609912319829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tripnkitten,2020/01/10,"Stuck in a rut Hey guys, so currently I feel as though im stuck, and no matter what direction I go I’m screwed and ig I’m looking for advice on how to get unstuck,

Currently I am working at a grocery store in a meat department, the people in my department are pretty cool, theres only 7 of us, in the morning there is a good amount(like 6 of 7, but none can close🙄) but after 330 its just one person to close the department, this means you have to wash out the meat room, clean the main room, close down the 2 sections of display, meat and fish, all while tending to customers. I am 25 and I currently have a herniated disk(due to this job) that was sustained last year, im currently under going injections but due to scheduling being tight I had to wait a month before I could get my next injection for this year, idk how familiar anyone is with all of this but its important to the story, bare with me. Since before thanks giving this had began and sometimes its back to back, other times its 4-5 days in a row, and its a heavy toll, I am due for my next injection on the 14th and I have a supply of tramadol in the meantime but it barely helps, and I have to use it sparingly, I had seen a dr and he suggested a ten Ib wait limit to which I agreed, idk I figured he knew better than me, next day I brought it to my manager at the job and showed it to him, I had later brought it up to my gm, (its because of him we only have one person, he has been cutting hours) and ig I was supposed to take it to him, I didnt know that, he then proceeded to tell me that I need to bring him the drs note, brought me to the back of the display case infront of my manager and customers and told me to show him which things I cant lift, but he was very condescending and rude about it, and when I do bring in the drs now he says he will call corporate and they will take me off the schedule, unfortunately I need to work to pay my bills, I also forgot to mention this place has a union but involving them is a last ditch effort. Also sorry for all the commas, its just how I process my train of thought, Idk that all just seemed fishy to me. 

That was the beginning of the issues, I wanted to break it up so its not one long paragraph. 

So now I cant do anything about my back accept deal with it and work or basically lose my income,  and we’re talking 8 hours in a department I barely know with rude customers. idk whats with the area, people are very rude and self serving here. V greedy. the other guy closing is ready to go to corporate/the union because the gm is harassing him about his health issues(I dont want to get to specific on details just in case) while most of the people I work are cool, with some of them shouldnt be in that space, one person there everyone tiptoes around so as not to mess up her thing, and if you do you get yelled at by her in front of customers, its very degrading. The other guy we work with is a real jerk, hes nice but if hes in a bad mood its a bad day, he raised a knife at one of our employees (I wasnt there but thats the story) he still works there. There is no leader ship, and its a absolute mess, I get paid $10 an hour and could step down to a minum wage job but thats a 50 cent decrease. 

One day a lady had a complaint that I threw her product down on the counter at her, it was a really stressful day and there was alot of people so I was in a rush, I was flustered but I dont think I was rude, but idk its crappy when its your word against theirs. My manager pulled me into an isle and told me I was disturbing because I didn’t admit acceptance for acting up but I think it was a ploy to discipline me. I mean this is everyday and its always something new, I admit im late alot coming in/breaks, but so is a handful of people, we had a guy leave to go black friday shopping and nothing happened, another girl got left to go have dinner with her boyfriends family and was gone for 20 min but got suspended, nothing there makes sense. Im moving out of state at the end of aug. 

This town is really terrible too, i developed a mass drug problem, im addicted to psychedelics (as you can tell by my username, a throwback to a younger me absolved in the culture) Its the only way I can escape this place. The people here are all rude and only care about themselves im battling major depression and this bipolar disorder, I have really bad ADHD and its all just getting worse and worse, my girlfriend, I love her to death but I cant talk to her because she cant help and I know its not her fault, shes dealing with work and school, it just sucks because shes all I got in this mess and it makes me feel like im dealing with this on my own, dont get me wrong she does what she can but dealing with my issues can be mentally draining and I understand that. Shes a great girlfriend other than that and its because of her im getting out of here and moving, I used to be homeless and went through alot of bad things which is where the drug addiction came from, and she helped pull me out. I know I shouldnt use drugs to escape but I know people will understand or they wont. Im just dealing with so much, the future seems so bright, I mean I use drugs but im responsible, I paid off my bank debt and I pay all of my bills, im currently saving for a car but its too much and I dont want to go back to fast food, its just so hard getting i to anywhere else around here, and id be going to two week pay which really sucks. Its just emotionally draining. I know I should get a therapist but I just cant afford it right now. Sorry for the long read, and I suppose I should thank you for making it this far, im just really worried all of this is getting to me and it helped to type it out. Life is hard. Its been hard but I feel like ive already lived a long life. Its just draining now, I really want to get out of here but my gf needs to finish school and I support her. Idk I keep going,  my bad. I know I may seem “weak” and that this is my job and managers basically own me, you know the industrial revolution mentality, but all of this seems really unfair for a union backed position.",3.84917229055377,4.099846463756826,5.071231393646753,86.57220191814156,71.11223694466095,8.378567762294926,27.259747542915807,8.331364938255728,1.5661579263540104,4755,149,1062,68,82,1583,452,1283,0.14300000000000002,0.774,0.083,-0.9975,15,0,5,0,0,0,120.0,5,7,5,11,62,48,12,2,74,2,92,20,1,10,10,199,193,98,1,16,43,0,8,2,3,9,15,2,3,9,82,76,2,7,29,4,13,31,21,30,0,8,44,16,148,17,155,133,23,154,0,2,4,2,90,61,3,14,61,711,230,23,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789896813930788,0.043540088759666064,0.03540245471006327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039979484051902735,0.057944464906059284,0.030145341014485245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037989152916828514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025332084183251214,0.0,0.02981329184181435,0.0645027910598545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714669354961234,0.15124806087411272,0.13250878058155394,0.0,0.06165623871369497,0.0,0.0,0.03204151153868565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0369937501435502,0.04143620183313875,0.036937770700495774,0.0,0.0,0.031207983189493218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057851645798037275,0.0,0.0,0.11682319345145666,0.18675198816395286,0.031203892249621244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04152144982989255,0.0,0.03170414819866031,0.0,0.16983996999572545,0.0,0.16805605476914276,0.0,0.03026459111308344,0.04075262808215438,0.032088045682493384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03461825958965612,0.0,0.0,0.03415337580759545,0.0,0.05495525021144106,0.05176385645680446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043808120934974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271372141119831,0.0347540551502644,0.16471771721670275,0.03038707638100685,0.08692666534351991,0.0399424821698788,0.0,0.14348919893310896,0.03203709022211952,0.0,0.09736191550634096,0.0,0.0,0.03850961886713113,0.0,0.0,0.0971338525856689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703448484905302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4696010531124834,0.07562710296441144,0.14380634342767035,0.032201904504377835,0.0,0.0,0.15928361595895704,0.059062766014676873,0.04086776905559046,0.03836116639632636,0.03936279799076152,0.0,0.0511790767475958,0.03539921402339367,0.0,0.0319907760533685,0.0961842901141191,0.03042314544069624,0.040530864009360915,0.0,0.0,0.032697990188563536,0.0,0.07254920172278663,0.0,0.0,0.11839165524662808,0.0,0.0,0.07302040555615746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02891755655922595,0.07701115903275206,0.053264809460525406,0.08058979478627243,0.0,0.03499009038653876,0.11558951538222548,0.0,0.0,0.06952519940851211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472978120818892,0.11021482192924163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17581586818950762,0.09490101524002342,0.07570296402010139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03685780846151248,0.0,0.03466615755486769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03623869681539753,0.041236411477735865,0.1624640947823112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030939276467864645,0.0,0.02881066964601705,0.0,0.07333114728784018,0.0,0.13192569323569314,0.03779463637920425,0.0,0.0,0.02996891447218446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0278907716321271,0.03583130131249782,0.08111055868895428,0.0,0.0,0.028932440558897942,0.0,0.041500074254787744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041112118175077435,0.0,0.0,0.05447923723212393,0.0582388233528544,0.06333129825501789,0.06670939390091234,0.0,0.042064536838923625,0.07220659961345767,0.04642802324726701,0.03559470319501677,0.028761694046830374,0.021125358714849413,0.0,0.0,0.06923651917931224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03539036396494835,0.07543111009256961,0.043578897247371545,0.12516052491296475,0.0,0.0896778921769435,0.08547495843825965,0.02875680875871768,0.029060632480950456,0.0,0.0,0.033584546552578684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18462545790589194,0.03679219919261885,0.07384067369176459,0.0,0.03961060692892365,0.0,0.04666043825628037
mentalhealth,DepessedLion,2020/01/10,My Whole Life Is Controlled By One Person. I'm not sure if this is the right subreddit for this but my entire life is currently being controlled by one person. They're a pretty small part of my life but for some reason before I make any decision I think of what he would think. LITTERALLY everything I do is based on what they would think. I don't know what to do anymore. They are indirectly controlling my life and it's because of me not him. I can't ever make a change in my life unless it's his suggestion. I haven't pursued my passion in music because they find it annoying I LITTERALLY made a new account because I'm worried about him finding out even though he hasn't ever used Reddit. Whenever I try to cut ties with him I just have the urge to text him or hang out and act on it. He isn't even a good friend he talks behind my back and doesn't support anything I do but I can't help but stay friends. I hide almost everything I do in life because I'm scared of him somehow finding out. I LITTERALLY DONT CHAT ON DISCORD WITH RANDOM PEOPLE BECAUSE IM SCARED HE'LL FIND OUT! I have no self control and just can't control it. And no this isn't a sexual/romantic thing they're just a friend. Which reminds me of another point. I'm not even having relationships with other people because I'm scared of what he'll think. Please help me.,3.2177322677322664,4.838905007326009,4.507420912420916,84.84856393606395,74.01831501831502,7.454478854478855,26.69480519480519,8.150884317080207,1.6823274725274726,1069,39,215,17,22,353,130,273,0.19,0.7559999999999999,0.054000000000000006,-0.9881,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,3,5,12,12,2,3,8,0,25,7,0,10,3,55,42,13,0,3,13,0,0,0,3,4,6,0,0,3,15,12,0,5,11,1,1,2,15,5,0,2,1,0,34,7,29,36,3,21,0,0,0,1,27,13,0,7,5,143,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08198775762586519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0556790109656165,0.08585493183645168,0.0,0.0,0.08119975444575002,0.0,0.0,0.06737760498379912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295818182981601,0.0,0.2994679125767252,0.0,0.06967110037496195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661476570788343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4591587958465879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595896412202323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16223650226158315,0.14812445117648296,0.0,0.0,0.14717112204745872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29933553617065994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18977336714232654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06867434967850276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097605454774478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844096123431026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04499733128019386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3469919022862113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747377904227254,0.10930675891151766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907709423436023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096363606418652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866456258580807,0.0,0.1135260855135165,0.1429832740673892,0.0,0.08987610582951044,0.07740001213206169,0.0,0.0,0.08329810985867922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841829556504133,0.0,0.08790500896721944,0.0,0.06992231382555951,0.0,0.0,0.24591878950164606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541532729682544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726974228563057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291278779764096,0.07716788632571835,0.0,0.0,0.06580944592449063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0543952875313977,0.20985331154512496,0.08044351036827539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055588951989700784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071524046971428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141248921054893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314983386734469,0.0,0.11632581585296613,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hahuju,2020/01/10,"Options when Therapy isn’t affordable? I need help working through some serious trauma I’ve experienced, and unfortunately mental health services/counselors are not only impossible for me to budget in right now, but difficult to obtain due to massive waiting periods.

I’m wondering if anyone has any resources like books that have helped them work through traumas and working through anxiety from survivors guilt? I’ve been trying to do it myself in my head but it’s starting to manifest in my dreams, disrupting my social and academic life and making me really depressed because i’m panicky and anxious everyday. 

I’ve been diagnosed with General Anxiety disorder with OCD tendencies, and I want to try rearranging the pattern of thinking I’ve become accustomed to.  

Thanks",10.834935064935069,11.138542060606067,10.447619047619053,53.74500000000002,56.42424242424242,14.20952380952381,49.917748917748916,13.25671669890799,7.500111255411258,640,41,82,22,7,209,97,132,0.222,0.6859999999999999,0.092,-0.9562,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,4,2,8,0,1,1,0,7,4,1,1,0,22,17,10,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,3,2,1,0,2,6,0,0,2,1,9,2,18,15,1,10,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,4,7,51,12,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242890330542905,0.0,0.27963522218326065,0.20647669043707015,0.0,0.1277961756734193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141414762776836,0.2018537503750404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741847637880546,0.18550645735152266,0.0,0.0,0.20946884821203784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18757348989935724,0.1942746590552615,0.0,0.0,0.2450121118948725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909498949090675,0.08929159048479786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199957520618072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18418793551872192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552072933133946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390038877495577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708635605136587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608353351793802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18630974746819348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293646782413675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16826893042746394,0.2090120203921169,0.0,0.0,0.11711084986446275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481759992313034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780175769623644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982049379342066,0.39917353054804383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kindasadngltbh,2020/01/10,"I don't have schizo right? I've struggled with depression and social anxiety for years. It's still really bad and it's gotten worse, actually. Every day at college is stressful.

But over the past year, besides the anxiety, or basically thinking that people are laughing at me or talking about me in public, I've been really paranoid. I constantly feel like everyone I see is out to get me. I feel like I'm just surviving each day because I constantly feel like someone is trying to kill me, or that someone is watching me or plotting something against me. I never go in public if I can avoid it. Sadly though, I had a panic attack because my dad had asked me to follow him outside to the backyard, and for absolutely no reason, I thought he was going to murder me. I had no reason to believe this but I couldn't help but feel that way.

I'm a total recluse, like I said. I have no friends. I'm sad and lonely. The only thing keeping me sane is my dog.

I want to go to therapy, but I don't trust anyone, including therapists. Also, most offices near me have advertised Christian counseling, and I don't want them to recommend ""prayer"" because most of their websites say that shit.

This is all bullshit man",3.8496896086369774,5.6679999743589775,5.2490553306342775,79.36524291497976,72.76068376068376,8.003238866396762,31.119208277103013,8.6894789155246,2.721849572649572,950,44,171,18,19,318,135,234,0.233,0.6779999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.9868,0,3,1,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,2,1,5,20,4,4,6,0,20,1,1,2,3,36,41,16,2,4,10,1,4,4,1,0,0,2,1,1,10,8,0,2,8,0,0,4,8,13,0,0,8,8,31,7,22,32,5,22,1,4,2,0,15,8,1,7,13,116,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.11533780946959457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945176628065638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808322771220526,0.0,0.0,0.08264221250128931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049305451741348,0.13445984123334173,0.0,0.0,0.09868492696254837,0.21614523944989567,0.0,0.0,0.13316129469489654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25544594629000994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524474197772922,0.0,0.10179812586701918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995813972810654,0.11293699897479086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23904460094592694,0.25330799437445445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913144239266524,0.0,0.061750156375487635,0.0,0.2015127805485249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922124003283942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050539946001184,0.13076133197628695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309694967486449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115653535007533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988992643457991,0.0,0.13867220512226816,0.0,0.0,0.1128271161793806,0.08193907228989539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15143294338519395,0.24304099828387046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093485565565688,0.11242713802031233,0.09399058782399022,0.0,0.0,0.09418328628393058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12132182874577445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204813028261101,0.20028647031473515,0.09098955535491013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943878475830365,0.0,0.13538791086329316,0.1235593695022596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499781345535396,0.0,0.0,0.13516222777049694,0.13722938732806927,0.07852115004413107,0.07573231115646395,0.11612250314989114,0.09383081210849503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802442387579955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394247632309685,0.0938148745719142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044718867837688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15222284222189494
mentalhealth,katalinathegreat,2020/01/10,"Reading helped me. Reading made me find my long lost self. College sucked the life out of me. I was constantly stressed trying to meet grade quotas and studying for never ending exams!!! After I graduated, there is no more blueprint to follow so I felt lost. I am still reviewing for my board exam but I am allowing myself to breathe once in a while. Reading has been my escape. There's this unexplainable joy that I feel when I read and see books. There are still times when I overthink of the path I am taking and I don't know what the future holds, but the stories I read inspire believe in a better tomorrow. 

I hope that those of you who feel alone and lost will eventually find something or someone that will make them believe in the magic of life again. Happy New Year and beyond. ❤️",2.9101960784313685,5.31748145751634,3.7357124183006576,86.44670588235296,77.56209150326798,5.910065359477124,24.579084967320266,7.0316486544052195,1.0801132026143792,625,22,117,7,15,199,102,153,0.086,0.755,0.159,0.9576,0,1,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,4,10,10,1,1,7,0,11,3,1,3,1,22,25,12,0,1,3,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,7,6,0,1,7,6,0,1,3,5,0,0,7,4,21,5,15,16,1,22,0,3,1,0,6,5,1,2,16,82,28,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253764576726572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727750310365912,0.0,0.10706329807239204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308174347641337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10721878695758452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241807687353047,0.0,0.1162317709342641,0.0,0.2212841290107056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288652840680963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811406056776016,0.0,0.0,0.1202349159399394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652865468313117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17100943388023587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712985361646876,0.0,0.0,0.3964374532119184,0.0,0.0,0.11454515515166233,0.08080514345255743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336506834165637,0.11691566024002895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12891960974562694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6054387281663649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646515114655133,0.0,0.12628675196296316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256949716786773,0.0931940427689926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19334933707975246,0.0,0.13866807795887778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091018284319971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058813608850444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218838953117635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795544232033304
mentalhealth,Kimxoz,2020/01/10,"I know I have anxiety and depression, but I'm not sure how to deal with it. To me it just seems like I'm too overly emotional, overly sensitive and a lot of stuff just gets to me. As mentioned I let my emotions control me. I want to control them. How do I do that? How do I stop feeling depressed? How do I stop overly worrying about simple things?",0.7325000000000017,2.9611616944444457,2.9977777777777814,89.60000000000002,84.83333333333334,6.377777777777778,24.277777777777786,7.645422480735847,1.3663277777777774,270,11,57,5,8,92,45,72,0.25,0.644,0.105,-0.9097,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,2,8,4,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,6,1,21,13,8,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,4,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,12,2,11,12,1,5,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,2,3,47,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15242044126212165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4469362015888748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20541090773399934,0.3432156141867411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4482433846729561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10074330793532507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409630661681298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949880796101248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20373958908645845,0.0,0.0973401241548194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.169389375416477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18138345317902455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33315233926727245,0.0,0.0,0.2280857036236301,0.0,0.0,0.18778428242601927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13236827549384642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11751875424423032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20234105960497406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HeckThisUsername,2020/01/10,"Thinking about trying SSRI antidepressants (On mobile, sorry if my spelling or grammar is bad)
My spouse is not a fan of antidepressants and neither was I for the longest time, but I'm just so tired of trying so hard to get so little back. 
I have had depression (and apparently OCD tendencies, just learned that today) since I was very young, around 7 or 8. 
I'm 24f have been going to counseling weekly for nearly a year now. Recently we have really been deep diving into my history with depression and my counselor believes that SSRI ones would really help me a lot. I trust her judgment. I have made a lot of progress but I'd say I'm at my base level that I have been for more than half my life. 
I dotn really no where to go with this. I've just been thinking about it a lot today. Tried asking my Spouse but he changed the subject multiple times. Usually he is more than willing to listen and is very supportive of me and my mental health. I think hes just worried and isnt sure how to express that.",4.422469490308688,5.518894854271358,5.5485463029432855,80.59945979899497,70.30653266331659,8.700789662598707,28.28463747307968,9.04235418022936,2.270975305096913,792,28,153,15,14,263,117,199,0.136,0.782,0.08199999999999999,-0.8859999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,1,14,6,0,0,7,0,20,3,0,2,1,33,33,16,0,2,11,2,1,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,6,11,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,3,0,2,8,3,21,3,23,23,6,22,0,2,0,0,12,9,0,6,11,109,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122628656043891,0.1287797043443437,0.0,0.0,0.10592293271541886,0.1150173264101164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15519954838624034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14572355385099464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23729152224490244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196983480983453,0.0,0.15657549043233218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339890674728055,0.0,0.0,0.14642413851694222,0.0,0.0,0.0923323906084388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729844702845612,0.0,0.13806388518694235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3513359627294182,0.0,0.13034445478248408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882180987830978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093344450356401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647427446319572,0.0,0.13601367105530304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954607204941516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395003671726653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420230100998122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631955504837478,0.12982981073318015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26479812733857183,0.0,0.0,0.16064882186218546,0.15832588054209706,0.2611459421567803,0.0,0.0,0.2805740882372746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171457800888688,0.22731996995919046,0.0,0.0,0.1104964993411694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398940376301961,0.0,0.0978552048958999,0.0,0.0,0.08870789526730789
mentalhealth,bravensohl,2020/01/10,"I have some problems but I don’t know what to do I made an account on here so I had a platform to vent.
Honestly I had a pretty broken childhood and had to deal with things that aren’t the greatest. I’ve always felt like an outsider and like I don’t fit in anywhere. One look at me and you’d think I had a great life because I don’t show it in public. I tend to try to keep myself in a state of content, otherwise if I get too happy or too sad and tend to crash and get sadder. I never got diagnosed with having OCD but I’m certain I have it. I’m always nervous and worried about anything and everything. I also look at pornography way more than I think I should, I think I’ve been using it as a coping mechanism to deal with my problems since I do it when I feel sad or happy or just do it when I’m bored. I don’t really know what to say to be honest but I feel like this might just be good for me to talk about these things.",2.0627941176470586,2.862544397058823,4.001254901960788,90.59864705882354,75.61764705882355,6.812549019607843,23.40392156862745,7.0316486544052195,0.6415180392156863,723,20,168,7,15,247,108,204,0.146,0.623,0.231,0.9741,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,11,16,0,1,8,0,21,2,0,2,2,37,42,19,0,4,9,0,3,3,0,2,2,1,0,0,12,10,0,1,8,1,1,0,6,6,0,1,8,6,25,10,25,29,3,14,0,2,2,0,6,8,0,6,7,118,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649282468937786,0.24241942223093815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987459321860305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879952077744252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003602384158168,0.0,0.1478527176725504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091945308241892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731098910013632,0.10406719373877707,0.13986673846278275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522138810375197,0.0,0.0,0.12218169129404452,0.11650618459257375,0.16060248655735618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101383871003436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947883191860485,0.0,0.0,0.16011363967101389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028915397698054,0.21350207168473176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24465343870674805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783716043384794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15453361712948965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235024202365228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871025200769493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819949503382676,0.0,0.2787744176249187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332039537451836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584320585920473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050032752564327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170846093748337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19355431132950252,0.2800197524433086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890085895478347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581273388540554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562663963801507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479356904039414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drb2021,2020/01/10,"I wrote my feelings on a piece of paper, trying to unburden myself. During exam time,2 months ago, I wrote my feelings on a piece of paper, trying to understand why I'm feeling so unhappy all the time.
Later I just folded it and forgot about it. Tried to get some studying done.
Today morning, after breakfast my Mom showed me the same peice of paper. What's worse, my Dad was the one who found it and showed it to her. 
I ran away from her and shut myself in my room. I tore that paper to shreds and now I'm crying. I'm not an able to stop. 
Why am I feeling this way? Please help me.",1.625454545454545,3.4252515454545467,3.4256198347107443,90.09479338842978,79.0,5.391735537190083,19.264462809917354,6.1124844417494595,-0.024477685950413,451,10,94,3,11,151,77,121,0.099,0.835,0.066,-0.7198,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,0,3,1,0,0,1,19,17,5,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,8,4,1,2,6,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,7,4,17,0,16,10,5,16,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,1,8,64,25,5,0.189915157691398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683483284685134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784315422757682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20861288299521524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19434914345269008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3841072401631228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20823216788206245,0.0,0.0,0.09922283143468737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729612696083242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224263373659802,0.15158846697298145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869142589460406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084698126936569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587775756678446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214821114141917,0.0,0.18001736329492068,0.0,0.0,0.386819777142298,0.0,0.0,0.1977083768745102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507458123524771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3427377808066944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19353977059336952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bretwink,2020/01/10,"Y’all I’m fucking losing myself again It’s been since last May that I’ve had an anxiety attack. I’m a 24y/o male. I never had a problem with anxiety or depression really until my last deployment to Iraq . It wasn’t Iraq that got me it was being alone factor . Every third week we had tower guard so I would sit up in a tower for 12 hours a day with nothing but myself . This time alone really killed me . My brother took his life December 31, 2015 and I was there for it . It destroyed me but the effects didn’t really kick in until Iraq  2018/2019 . I did the thing I never thought I would do and that’s was seeking help , I got help for about 2 months after I got back from deployment and it really helped a lot , I moved past most of it and I got a house, a dog , and finally settled with my wife . Now here I am , on my second deployment and everything is coming back full force . I just need help",1.7055007949125596,3.569534837837839,3.6433068362480117,88.32454689984104,79.0,7.1637519872814,21.152623211446734,8.124751697461798,1.0203131955484896,695,19,148,13,17,235,110,185,0.133,0.799,0.068,-0.8676,2,2,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,1,0,2,9,7,4,0,10,0,17,2,0,1,2,27,28,12,1,4,4,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,12,11,0,1,2,0,0,3,4,7,0,2,16,0,24,0,17,8,3,27,0,2,0,1,10,5,1,4,18,104,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633983138251863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19455372920670808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466257880960093,0.0,0.1955560051441478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953686952829048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200752237830362,0.0,0.10952251074245406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713757803077154,0.0,0.11428298857954387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392972961972069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755714456907465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4068050896869307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409300137356743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252267443958132,0.14672528459501502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14068342873795814,0.0,0.0,0.20730434439312675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981669559100404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14225923975622165,0.0,0.10810667651393452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149770334954897,0.13515069570456878,0.0,0.09428734717454816,0.1961468845736002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201321454028632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138837467340655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167471233492312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3258471809261411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10518786345505823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844792910082875,0.0,0.0,0.10095064167045996,0.07414787579307111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127916673522162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199988538660716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18066128326919567,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,My_face_when_I_shart,2020/01/10,"Need help on dealing with crippling social anxiety? I have to go somewhere in a few hours where I need to talk one on one with another person.

I'm off meds atm because I haven't gone back to my doctor or psychiatrist. 

I HAVE to go to this thing I cant avoid it and im already panicking a lot. Does anyone have any tips or advice please, breathing exercises don't work. I'm going to try sleep now, which in my current state probably won't happen but It's almost 5am.",2.4295918367346943,3.923346806122448,4.479336734693877,84.76655612244899,75.83673469387755,7.348979591836735,25.51530612244898,8.07648339933343,1.5091183673469382,369,13,77,6,8,127,70,98,0.039,0.903,0.057999999999999996,0.16399999999999998,1,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,2,0,7,4,2,0,0,11,16,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,0,1,1,4,4,1,0,2,1,0,7,0,13,14,2,15,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,4,4,45,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809400261546934,0.0,0.0,0.185414905211594,0.0,0.2043329749093972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12591780577260472,0.1941605004133148,0.14164988144477114,0.0,0.0,0.1294709085064508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237961439973518,0.0,0.11287419860435835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19089585679617535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895231040858523,0.16203818213337726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3156987450314393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373983075989412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411146325371325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823491492011965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20000879300678212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741973154692998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20567535759923453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27459338052218063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509437098726584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16167798080920234,0.0,0.20325436535550098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19963800849029995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18529762938171876,0.1887512841538933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882773393801774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12301467162470248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12571413784746074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480152902189466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pashera,2020/01/10,"I'm at the end of my rope I just did the dumbest and most petty thing that nobody related actually understands and all it did was hurt people's feelings and it affects my job and I was doing so much better and now I've just ruined everything. One of my supposed friends just straight up told me ""this is why we all avoid you"". I can't deal. I'm just done. No more. Fuck this. I want to just drug myself to death or some shit. I don't know. Whatever I can get my hands first on please for the love of God dont make me go back tomorrow.",0.030989966555182488,2.124268834782612,2.1226086956521755,95.6005016722408,86.7391304347826,5.625418060200667,19.2809364548495,7.010146845296331,0.18042474916387974,416,12,98,6,13,139,82,115,0.209,0.6509999999999999,0.14,-0.878,1,1,1,0,0,0,11.0,1,1,0,2,8,8,2,1,3,0,11,5,2,2,2,23,23,7,1,1,6,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,5,0,2,6,2,15,3,9,17,6,10,0,2,0,2,6,4,2,3,5,67,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.20434689475882475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16101780285429831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18519973127288136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158850588611097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21429173465072532,0.2454184844293776,0.0,0.24284072978617186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18546869832575594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18819770542087808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588033129985866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17811788740302287,0.0,0.0,0.1617840590341839,0.1935894846531024,0.10940430344768452,0.0,0.11900841868674199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241699940089364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077999357644593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508228488282855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18899417366043786,0.0,0.13977797361296912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15393512859841793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418967349158557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451735129950864,0.0,0.0,0.22986135668413815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21494893205160573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391178942811453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20009331848775053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21799566637005272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351117794656745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889534275135238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spookyscarywow,2020/01/10,"Anyone else struggling right now? I’m dealing with addiction, suicidal thought, and PTSD 
Anyone out there also feeling worthless who would like to talk about stuff to eachother during attacks?",7.894408602150537,11.493856290322585,5.569032258064516,73.54021505376346,66.74193548387098,6.713978494623658,39.36559139784946,7.793537801064563,3.862410752688172,159,9,19,2,3,45,29,31,0.325,0.579,0.096,-0.8875,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,4,2,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,5,2,0,3,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,12,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737436322659255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200810131315202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3511596256569786,0.2572887371910804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856703982402481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588802318038618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20976762924541767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696721512354225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267816827745492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29353057833139545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21444395699854155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26251149762083675,0.2874573725252027,0.2746702389537022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20183024874057634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993508635468548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17837916744879773,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,triop09,2020/01/10,"I frequently fantasize about violently beating people Well I guess I'll start here, I think about in great detail beating people. Usually I visualize it like a little movie in my head. Sometimes I even do it when I'm trying to sleep to calm and distract myself. It's simply the thought of breaking bones and having control of people that puts my mind at ease. It's not just random people I fantasize about but usually very specific people that did something to me or the people I care about. Iv thought about acting on these thoughts and realized that the main thing that scares me is the fact that the only thing stopping me from doing so is the repercussions to myself for doing so, except for the occasional time someone managed to piss me off so much that I didn't care about the consequences but my girlfriend stopped me. Is thinking about these things normal or healthy? Give me your opinion",8.351789753825685,8.201388556886227,7.686187624750499,73.00590153027281,61.634730538922156,10.296473719228214,36.519627411842976,9.725611199111238,3.5589858948769137,727,30,122,12,9,227,99,167,0.107,0.773,0.121,0.5423,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,3,15,10,2,2,9,0,9,5,4,1,1,25,20,11,0,1,7,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,15,3,0,3,6,0,0,2,2,4,1,0,5,0,20,6,23,15,2,17,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,5,9,94,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656344492330173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461069873124075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604099058234578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496523373472672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14362127235866134,0.14350523073969546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336928691163499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06364251646797184,0.13056306996580608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153385841671228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576219717801196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763528583754327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907492035008028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5418698656910607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095563253338965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042130443256836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036238884741067,0.0,0.11037591686134432,0.10028690985788843,0.12883869016653865,0.0,0.09220458075222454,0.0,0.0,0.21782028143335752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596334315196287,0.1669413468975263,0.0,0.3102554625895085,0.07596049951917681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844363188223564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869442799843858,0.107484999072059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712685585281107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Needapsychotherapist,2020/01/10,"Scared I'm becoming less human – I can't feel I can't feel the pains of others, you can tell me the saddest story of your life and I'll just pretend to care but in my head I'm like “ok, so?”

I wasn't always like this, I used to understand other people's emotions and relate to what others feel but I can't anymore.

This is ruining my life because I'm always pretending to care when I don't, I thought this was just a “phase” I was passing through when all these started but it seems I'm stuck.

I don't wish people harm, or think about harming others but I just don't seem to care if something bad happens to anyone “close” to me.

My childhood friend died 7months ago and I still don't care she's dead, it's almost she was a stranger who died.

 I'm trying to care, I want to care, but I can't.

Someone help me",0.7410953346855997,2.597600425287361,2.5075118323191354,95.31514198782965,82.10344827586206,5.013657876943881,21.72954699121028,5.900188976854957,0.06576646382690933,630,20,144,4,17,208,91,174,0.17800000000000002,0.5710000000000001,0.25,0.938,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,0,0,8,16,0,1,4,1,14,4,1,1,1,27,39,13,3,3,10,0,3,2,1,0,3,0,0,1,12,4,0,0,8,2,0,1,9,6,0,0,6,3,23,10,14,33,2,9,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,5,8,86,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233326379390033,0.0,0.11559949977998685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921156661508499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11448844642172774,0.08072043745526393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639009210375866,0.07037298798519039,0.12749773572174186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7062110613553728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396232385759085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298578491389246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511436506530953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919098390813053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020858733460652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847783456665573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737901682024181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630816254097986,0.1127992478183102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228395030115778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16006729635452732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155785931789804,0.0,0.0,0.210189962905124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781448856977253,0.08887366988140243,0.0,0.0,0.08171115734783749,0.0,0.09219293768598724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090227994613282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397122004632392,0.0,0.09164885560224116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837822657166864,0.0,0.0,0.12018024573821165,0.0,0.09970569584819998,0.0,0.0,0.06809127889651304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327537653313824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ML-Tordoff,2020/01/10,"Feeling disconnected from reality (usually after dreaming)? I don't know if this is really a mental health issue but I feel like it is since it takes place in my brain.

So, sometimes I'll have these really intense vivid dreams and when I wake from them, I feel kind of...disconnected from reality. Like, I know I'm at home and I know who I am and what year it is but like...everything feels off? And when I'm feeling like this, I kind of stumble a bit and move slower and my words slur and my eyes can't focus everything just feels...weird.

Sometimes it'll happen when I'm waking but usually it goes away after a few minutes, so far it's been about 30 minutes (woke up at 9.00 pm) and I'm still feeling a bit disconnected. It's getting a bit better because I've been listening to some ambient music. 

But what the heck is going on? And how do I prevent it from happening? I really don't like this feeling.",2.2003857280617147,4.231057196721308,4.27708775313404,83.57111861137898,78.12568306010928,7.58457087753134,24.972356155576982,8.4952907291091,1.798410736097718,709,26,143,15,17,243,96,183,0.0,0.774,0.226,0.9895,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,1,9,7,0,0,6,0,13,5,4,1,0,29,34,20,0,1,6,0,7,4,0,1,1,1,1,0,15,9,0,1,10,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,10,14,7,16,30,5,20,0,0,2,0,3,9,1,2,13,87,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247340621130114,0.0,0.0,0.07297535102111369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587557480435286,0.392083641376858,0.0,0.0,0.13363823248423345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151789325108316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4237100454660616,0.17104461660109924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254460216535727,0.0,0.06803511348755892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21172193067299688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12724830500369427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008094106234625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249482719858211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24932334451026636,0.19737182626601216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924262895512929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120641583986619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272349576751041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12507360678575308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300718027618411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902704003754922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367965454980709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560219314147084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000855889538395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26369180780596285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770906315552888
mentalhealth,The_dark_light_,2020/01/10,"Am I suffering from any mental illness? I am 16. I lost interest in everything and everyone.  I don't like to meet people and I don't have any emotional attachment with anyone including my friends and my family. I don't find happiness in anything which I do. I have lost my appetite. I don't feel like eating. I don't even get any happiness when I eat my favourite food. I can't sleep well. If I close my eyes, I get all the thoughts which disturb me. My mind thinks about the things which I don't want to think about. I am always scared about everything. Even while walking down the stairs I walk very carefully because I am scared that I might fall and get hurt. I am always scared that something bad might happen. I show no interest in things which I previously was really excited in. I don't have any likes or dislikes. I am always irritated about everything. Some days, even if someone makes a little noise I get very annoyed.
Do I suffer from anything or am I overreacting?
Is it just a phase?",2.1968197278911568,4.6985304846938805,3.582653061224491,86.00044217687076,80.88775510204081,7.610884353741497,25.14965986394558,8.563005593585519,2.010023129251701,789,31,156,19,21,258,100,196,0.294,0.63,0.076,-0.9905,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,10,22,1,4,5,0,24,6,2,1,1,23,38,10,0,3,5,0,1,3,1,2,1,0,0,0,9,6,3,0,5,1,0,3,9,11,1,0,4,2,34,11,14,32,2,14,0,5,1,0,2,8,0,7,6,104,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671112224770425,0.0,0.0,0.2910693960034125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482067152409166,0.0,0.1761126719627049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934504874888985,0.0652295054908107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909914827463307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900963789948232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189864992145588,0.0,0.12036668508682527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212028194754332,0.0,0.0,0.10224825603595344,0.28850869156479464,0.0,0.10087517845959533,0.0,0.05410515106521301,0.07644468715557776,0.0,0.0,0.09780100728773217,0.0,0.1293913679921576,0.0,0.0826721152694348,0.0,0.2236236435058936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946245317502039,0.22781850000041945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11455150584854272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683231660858707,0.10724753337166372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23361809346831824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142694289934798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783628656748008,0.22703166275697995,0.10804496151740704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418407890151077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855040645707057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213932516255405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708268924730442,0.0,0.0906653376802124,0.08237799336781641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217928095896973,0.13712949364006174,0.0,0.0849503438875011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17658134153789268,0.06311456395159919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621071551919104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idkwhattodololol,2020/01/10,"Betrayed I feel fucking betrayed by my social worker for talking to her supervisor and them deciding that I was too high risk of killing myself that they have to tell one of my family members. As someone training to be in the social service sector, I was very cautious and unsure as to whether I should have even told her anything in the first place. I knew that if things were too serious, she would want to tell someone. Yet I told her (bc I did want to get some help) but at the same time undermining my suicide risk a whole lot. 
Now she fucking corners me with her supervisor because I’m about to leave for 6 months.",7.804738292011024,6.640212628099175,7.585743801652896,76.59558539944905,63.21487603305785,10.050137741046832,38.34848484848485,8.841846274778883,3.2742220385674936,492,22,94,6,6,157,81,121,0.212,0.77,0.018000000000000002,-0.9708,0,0,0,0,0,2,9.0,0,0,2,2,6,6,3,2,4,0,9,2,0,0,0,16,19,7,2,5,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,2,7,1,20,0,19,9,4,11,0,0,0,2,16,6,2,3,5,72,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102593722908768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446780511943593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319069983619498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615558542934211,0.0,0.08665168216298348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577036525394227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168644126499591,0.08953567497596232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148681657685436,0.18106570272355976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18959958656720527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814599834512497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456957749471331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678883693146074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161272412254934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790490212989675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3493877717466394,0.29040872705063225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18745499160778087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13774367302399404,0.2995763010585163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385305854676175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992937136461504,0.0,0.0,0.3275097919260162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140123427815873,0.2021612740272176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19133259439039546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12173894581550775,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Di1202,2020/01/10,"Crisis text line just told me to snap a rubberband on my wrist?!? I texted Crisis because I almost cut but didn’t go through. They told me that snapping a rubberband on my wrist should help. Except isn’t that just another form or self harm? When I asked them, they said that rubber bands can’t hurt me. Seems kinda counterintuitive this.",3.626458333333332,6.0472645625000006,3.6887500000000015,87.61458333333336,75.25,6.766666666666668,21.604166666666664,7.793537801064563,0.8795604166666666,268,7,52,4,6,82,47,64,0.23800000000000002,0.7120000000000001,0.051,-0.9207,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,3,0,3,3,1,0,2,0,4,2,2,0,0,9,10,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,1,11,0,5,5,1,4,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,4,1,32,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922467157625645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060313220873636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728413786188219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779097198189679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586570409125204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19562163830891344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124326354616644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27761722640038256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656902774760637,0.3044643444475268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5577524602236098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,winter_coffee,2020/01/10,"[Advice, insight needed] I didn’t take my Prozac and Wellbutrin for 3 days because i couldn’t keep anything down at the time. Now I’m depressed and anxious. 
This happened about a week ago. I was really sick with a stomach bug and kept throwing up etc. I didn’t take my meds cause I couldn’t keep anything down. 

I also just got news that my father may have lung cancer and I might need to plan a trip to see him. I’m feeling very stressed and wonder if this depression and anxiety is due to missed doses, or the bad news about my dad. I’ve began taking my meds again as I am feeling a lot better.",2.640975609756097,4.165842081300816,3.693178861788621,90.49196341463416,75.34146341463416,5.895609756097563,24.49512195121952,6.2581,0.6298526829268294,468,15,98,3,10,151,83,123,0.223,0.73,0.047,-0.9715,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,6,6,0,1,6,0,10,6,2,1,0,27,28,10,0,5,3,2,2,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,7,0,3,4,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,6,3,14,1,12,18,2,14,0,3,1,0,3,4,0,6,8,59,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557648864940404,0.14129943604147535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747298277716096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194138673482632,0.1800778440121767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623470071657985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309324015774032,0.09716941633844016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14097729800928646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374881395789026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280050700927762,0.0,0.2745838261352489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777743353580788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16119594684496022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748760193258565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409578449550076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833660005271073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355170944618205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3541173217657892,0.0,0.0,0.16909935154689415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363877559765836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211641089529287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270220197354918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18259339384039305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3595493140196656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294804920487744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152258141764536,0.0,0.0,0.12786192813216318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728636671781481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,andhonest,2020/01/10,"Today Today I decided it's time to get help. Life has been changing so drastically and yet I still find myself locked away in my head. The tears roll. The anger shows. The hollowness quickly appears. Today I have decided I need to make a change for myself, face the fear of putting myself first. I need to face the fear of what I know being said by someone else. It is time.",1.330165165165166,3.8817746891891933,2.6058558558558573,91.02457957957958,85.89189189189189,5.451051051051049,20.384384384384386,6.937597516519254,0.5159717717717713,293,9,59,4,9,94,52,74,0.159,0.8059999999999999,0.036000000000000004,-0.8519,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,2,6,0,5,4,3,1,0,9,12,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,1,0,2,0,3,0,1,2,1,10,0,9,9,0,13,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,9,39,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16979033478251704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3823509690107876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15096654409383314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4067155657783765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16517280768877968,0.15371847996343255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441759877481444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18546861388632754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211313411156496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931778419805633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12764633623544125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063054390229505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679999378956358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18167131730442265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719040247356573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531216170466832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14432147941654666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21075602085664052,0.0,0.5138980696575215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LEZ10N,2020/01/10,Constant feeling of guilt. Hello guys I’m 16M and always have this nasty feeling of guilt. I feel like karma is out to get me and that everything I do is wrong. I usually brush it off but it’s gotten annoying and I just want to feel normal again. What keeps attacking me is fear of the law. I haven’t done anything illegal or broken any law. The reason I feel this way is because when I was in 4th grade my best friend (I’m going to cut to the chase) convinced my stupid self to let him suck me off. I’m not gay but it still haunts me to this day. I was so stupid to allow it. I was only 10 years old I didn’t know any better! I feel like the only way to relieve myself of the guilt is to tell my parents. I have been dreading it and putting it off. Sometimes I don’t think it’s even worth it because of how awkward it will be. I’m scared they will get mad but this happened years ago. Please give me advice. Thanks,0.07021688970927542,2.14606783756345,1.918516382095064,97.25679626211357,86.36040609137055,4.5970466082141215,18.599215505306876,5.852544927426893,-0.3746020304568525,712,19,165,5,22,234,110,197,0.261,0.5710000000000001,0.168,-0.9773,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,2,7,23,7,7,5,0,20,1,0,3,0,27,42,11,0,2,6,1,6,2,1,2,0,0,0,2,15,5,0,1,9,0,1,2,4,15,0,0,7,7,24,8,19,31,1,19,1,0,0,1,9,5,1,1,12,100,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135649634060262,0.11915778498655025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185061626616152,0.0,0.0,0.18282435506055475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061858825307444,0.0,0.0,0.15292544793243548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388589712312546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410685341010152,0.11888612605109425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452633938899742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866916461515408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756129127345149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878505376580358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081062955877753,0.0,0.0,0.15126312762650854,0.4078095252103584,0.1920634847761256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385479451401378,0.0,0.14046082811047944,0.12895068874614338,0.07639562848115837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309979907420974,0.11886972129447225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11948124461514725,0.0,0.0,0.0738753071227123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745651662414815,0.0,0.13134447216741624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317058955133084,0.0,0.0,0.1410542149698562,0.0,0.0,0.2044693365473516,0.0,0.0,0.14926071599627522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14755597125981093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513213640054805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13820912321325465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345807672352361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023239506689214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294767942733252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735029685157073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174915343527884,0.12375854058134247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861327627664119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14804782670314134,0.0,0.07928610570411171,0.2133972728963436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697033261451234,0.0,0.1731278731166563
mentalhealth,11teacups,2020/01/10,"How do I accept my mistakes instead of (literally) beating myself up over them? I joined a school show where I play bass and I mess up a lot during rehearsal. Today was especially bad since I basically forgot how to play during a song. Whenever I think about it, my mood instantly drops and bury my face in my hands and press against my temples really hard. I'm pulling my own hair and clenching my fists so hard that they're leaving marks on my palms. When I hear the song I feel like crying and I end up unconsciously hurting myself. I don't know what to do about these tendencies and how to accept the mistake and move on.",4.3965040650406495,5.7448917398373975,5.185528455284555,82.22674796747971,70.62601626016259,8.06829268292683,28.300813008130078,8.515128840125781,1.987871544715448,496,18,97,8,9,161,81,123,0.18100000000000002,0.722,0.09699999999999999,-0.8714,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,1,1,9,11,0,0,5,0,4,4,4,3,0,19,10,12,0,2,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,7,0,1,5,5,0,2,1,5,0,0,2,9,21,5,14,8,2,14,0,1,0,0,2,8,0,1,4,64,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20859162835986428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274418648526505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22126887647729893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12631792943634673,0.17847348002527672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4475843718443159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28156848654238026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26744050700760225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729609421067324,0.0,0.0,0.2645263059290896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122050815943103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123904367410858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655221325100585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004290229668244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528340418691229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20665602698647265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600763823798325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368028322959807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Unimagined-Idle,2020/01/10,"Finally, I'm trying Got put on antidepressants today. Atm its 20mg of citalopram a day. I just hope this helps.. its unbearable",1.3912499999999994,4.012355625000001,3.466666666666669,80.89500000000002,96.91666666666666,7.4,22.66666666666667,8.07648339933343,2.2561166666666668,101,4,18,3,4,34,22,24,0.0,0.868,0.132,0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,8,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261949842934858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4449458269423641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248559591186512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27225113306638044,0.0,0.0,0.4034243006374989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083189497140056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3850072449081204,0.0,0.0,0.2757667629900443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,issaknife_,2020/01/10,"My eating disorder is consuming me Every minute of my life I think about food. I count every single calorie and when I don’t I panic. I’m hungry and I feel alone. I’m bony and I started liking it, and I don’t know how I can be normal again. I have no one to help me through this and my SO tells me to just eat and gets mad when I don’t. I just want to be normal and feel normal. It’s hard for me to lose weight now, so I have resorted to starving. This constant up and down, restricting, cutting out food, binging/purging, hating myself has gone on since I was 14. I’m 19 now and I hate seeing other girls my age eating and staying fit or thin, and I can’t eat what they do. They haven’t had to deal with the things I’ve dealt with. They didn’t have cancer, they don’t harm themselves the way I have. They treat their body kindly and I feel like I’m stuck and have no choice. I want to tell someone in my life what’s going on, but I don’t have any friends. I want to tell someone about the unnecessary weight I’ve lost and I want them to tell me how thin I look so I can tell myself it’s okay to eat. I want to be healthy and I want to be happy.",0.12430830039525632,1.8666504901185768,2.11569328063241,97.91893122529645,83.62450592885375,4.838513833992095,17.629881422924896,5.6839178017228535,-0.6311968695652177,886,19,217,5,25,295,120,253,0.134,0.725,0.141,0.5647,0,1,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,7,2,14,15,4,1,3,1,25,13,1,2,0,39,50,24,0,9,4,0,8,2,1,0,3,0,0,1,9,18,9,1,5,0,0,2,10,8,0,1,6,10,44,7,25,40,1,21,0,2,2,0,16,9,0,1,10,139,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687860319379668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360999618895545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390118087568964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108285549455892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09643500892336836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720425052025664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4785707660006779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762194918341296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418889859387639,0.06682456246379379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22621641540819026,0.0,0.07226830452707544,0.0,0.048870473180916106,0.0,0.05316059378335865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957442531423212,0.0837929248925173,0.18470157404405996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269748472929633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974068856417969,0.0514068052145151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213928192591007,0.09139724705980716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854953328461467,0.10464665653206127,0.10210929928900207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27494624035915666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063384714857043,0.0,0.0,0.10974832582053984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453878721279636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737675413692369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585112516395521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620766521149447,0.09970054923619494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40878777064138944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062143417646302164,0.05993626734797946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.331031752088295,0.07424721783470195,0.0,0.22781156685192055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,topeiz,2020/01/10,"mental illness or normal??? so i sometimes can view myself, like my full body, me viewing myself as another perspective doing something. IS THAT MENTAL ILLNESS OR WHAT AND INSTEAD OF HURTING OTHERS I HURT MYSELF??",3.3830952380952404,6.212076833333337,4.443492063492066,72.36500000000002,100.11111111111113,4.27936507936508,30.142857142857146,6.1826913282559595,2.5765523809523807,170,9,19,2,7,55,30,36,0.318,0.628,0.054000000000000006,-0.9209999999999999,0,0,1,0,0,2,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,4,3,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,7,1,2,3,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,21,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827903787880758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29956150792281266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5774111141652261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175546667745205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5435622160802995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642360419311593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20761826123917165,0.2667273811768072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slonty,2020/01/10,"Quitting weed Many people have told me that most of my anxiety probably comes from smoking weed, so I’ve decided that after I finish what I have I’ll stop smoking. It’s giving me time to really take this seriously and think about it. Being high is what calms me when I do have anxiety, but maybe it’ll go away after a while. I guess I’ll see what happens.",5.8897945205479445,5.291920136986303,7.045308219178088,77.05645547945207,66.8082191780822,10.587671232876714,30.578767123287676,10.125756701596842,2.812564383561644,282,9,57,6,4,96,52,73,0.09300000000000001,0.857,0.05,-0.2062,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,8,16,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,8,1,7,13,1,11,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,2,7,37,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36993114211000266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271658359224581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082771654543937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23194309131708696,0.13741251330510254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663544559008591,0.0,0.21381049522982906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25546010504471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451329784495422,0.2429064601979945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16762391691377165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606861217818169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571690935711507,0.0,0.0,0.15489425502769527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19267207833240774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20214386000532575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817929251936466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492665804253303,0.0,0.0,0.1409873174315677,0.0,0.0,0.23103681312944996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wgeou,2020/01/10,"Uhhhhh tf? So basically ever since I was like 8 I’ve been doing these repetitive actions but luckily not in public. The repetitive actions are completely pointless. I’ve had several repetitive actions over the years but one of the things I’m doing right now is this arm stretch thing, usually when I am holding something like a fork. (Sorry for saying repetitive actions so much lol)",5.549130434782609,8.128326159420292,6.680507246376813,67.64945652173915,70.01449275362319,10.397101449275363,36.13768115942029,10.504223727775694,4.867655072463768,311,17,46,10,6,104,52,69,0.12300000000000001,0.7490000000000001,0.129,0.3506,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,1,8,1,1,0,1,5,9,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,3,1,2,2,4,6,1,17,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,11,32,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29735319038757074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565358753421643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771089843454261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20848142618653268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19217727581626226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24219609714290435,0.0,0.2255331262056648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203915714087473,0.0,0.23459999552063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183320622452627,0.0,0.31747123711747616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3768275282176045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31234952042719216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263155003618825
mentalhealth,PumpkinSpiceAngel,2020/01/10,"Five years later... As many of you don't know, 2019 had marked five years since I had self-harmed. For context, in 2014, my dad had some drinking issues that I would rather not go into detail about here. Being a kid starting high school, it took quite a toll on me, which had led to me going to some dark places, including thoughts of harming myself. I had considered cutting myself in the hopes that my dad would sober up enough to really care about his kid. I had started scratching, but luckily stopped before I could really start bleeding and left with only a minor scratch. My dad eventually sobered up with AA and things started to look up for me. I graduated high school with a 3.75 GPA and started college that fall. 

I'm thankful for the fact that I'm still here despite everything, as I wouldn't have met the amazing people I have in my life if I had went through with it. To everyone here, please don't harm yourself. There are people who care for you and would genuinely miss you if you had decided to end it. Things will get better.",6.223052805280532,6.455778747524754,5.871039603960397,82.95213696369638,65.98019801980197,8.91155115511551,31.189768976897692,8.59863814320734,2.2328006600660064,825,29,162,11,12,255,120,202,0.037000000000000005,0.802,0.161,0.9840000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,1,25.0,0,4,0,2,8,10,1,0,7,0,20,3,0,1,1,28,41,9,0,9,5,3,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,11,9,1,1,3,1,0,6,4,4,1,2,12,3,23,6,29,22,3,29,0,1,1,0,12,12,0,5,11,109,34,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851162195782192,0.0,0.0,0.11278263026027788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600338582980489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10181574564781344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12492277286687906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294642537740927,0.1317640626899698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218525027085742,0.11460833166675123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662485425771361,0.0,0.1449471053803041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694674733454872,0.0,0.12665787728359304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309958209981906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008262213039487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855276104693318,0.0,0.09007238754821953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708615788771404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12928704528030133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969860418089215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768150582852165,0.0,0.1332330934259733,0.1399805940529952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563508449790754,0.0,0.0,0.16338740458413076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581176503218648,0.0,0.0,0.13303300299771978,0.0,0.0,0.10548731435898163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4513027763338535,0.0,0.10183903908971163,0.10661389808480194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174048998613886,0.0,0.0,0.1694395766717435,0.0,0.0,0.10123802996704592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14168136307988338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821394542281152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717633901109279,0.0,0.0,0.1642396598327415
mentalhealth,wewewee500pc,2020/01/10,"I'm going to start therapy and I have a few questions I recently told my mom about my mental health issues, I didn't tell her specificaly what was going on, but I told her that I thought I might have anxiety and depression, and that this has been going on for almost 4 years, and then I told her about some of the things that cause me anxiety (mainly my dad) and some of the things that make me go into a depressive state for days. My whole family has noticed a change in me since my friend died 3 years ago, but she recently noticed a big change in me, and I can understand that because over the years its gotten harder for me to hide my issues. My mom goes to therapy, so she is going to get me a therapist at the place she goes to. 

Here are my questions: do I have to tell my dad in going to therapy? My dad is one of those people who is like ""well it won't be my child. My child won't be depressed. My child doesn't need a therapist."" Ive tried opening up to him about my anxiety before, but he always tells me ""you're not going to start this moody teenager shit."" 

If I don't have to tell my dad, is there an option for them to text me to remind me of appointments instead of calling the house phone (which is the way they remind my mom of her appointments)? My dad or grandmother almost always answer the phone and I don't want them to say ""*my name* has an appointment next week"" and then my family be like ""why tf is she going to therapy""

If I tell the therapist about EVERYTHING (TW. My self harm, suicidal thoughts ect.) Will they send tell my parents or send me to a mental hospital?

If I tell them I vape (I am under age) will they take it away or tell my parents?

If I get put on medicaton, when i go for a check up at the doctor, will they ask me if I'm still taking that medication? (I'm already taking amatriptyline for chronic pain and whenever I go to the doctor they always ask ""are you still taking amatriptyline for chronic pain?"" And it is usually my dad taking me for those check ups)

How long is your first appointment? My mom's are usually about an hour but she says your firt one is usually longer.

Will my mom be in the room for my first appointment? There are many things I don't want her to know about because I don't want her to worry.

If they do suggest medication, and i say no, will I be able to change my mind later if i decide to?

And lastly, in your experience, how much has therapy helped you? Does it help just a little bit or alot?",3.4417896354852893,4.37020842490119,4.886528326745719,85.06307751427319,72.4584980237154,8.626174791392183,24.925120772946862,8.998388855275968,1.6690414580588495,1917,55,413,38,36,643,200,506,0.10300000000000001,0.857,0.04,-0.9847,2,0,0,0,0,0,61.0,0,5,9,2,18,12,1,0,24,0,47,10,1,4,0,56,84,33,2,11,17,13,0,2,1,8,9,3,1,4,21,14,0,0,8,0,2,13,10,8,1,4,9,3,89,4,58,62,8,63,0,3,0,0,73,22,1,20,28,291,110,2,0.05386506855829082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477481332446634,0.0,0.10787617073619137,0.0,0.059441442593854935,0.0,0.13446015624351898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12361989003574915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071313570447353,0.0,0.05060800504014298,0.0,0.0,0.06567129167128655,0.0,0.045835205993343626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05880670393520958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05500225747372039,0.0,0.0,0.0553342632253814,0.17094630084439227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034738513074157984,0.0,0.1391817138599932,0.0,0.055903436965929316,0.0,0.0,0.11026636025559364,0.04713768448565173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04841045038052099,0.052690372946300565,0.10155838553683988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163519959739827,0.0,0.0,0.04161601835005569,0.0,0.05628455024597804,0.0,0.30612759782668714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05725604903330075,0.0,0.0,0.07220924005541557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05304624223812799,0.06215305705372678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244227398138901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029602832986395718,0.043907220149938565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05263150333574641,0.05398694955666014,0.0,0.047668890639231035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03595535153177131,0.05461072506129097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10852677935970803,0.1085666398148469,0.0571423255141463,0.05438836403889456,0.31543058640049537,0.0,0.0,0.03959702318456705,0.039940265814167215,0.0,0.0,0.05728611149762172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12265147513776932,0.0,0.0,0.07300072898805827,0.0,0.11463246143146387,0.0,0.11962156826578225,0.0,0.0,0.03734325629368111,0.0,0.0562775320479825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414927153284773,0.1206824087706849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637051374204387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850699350929246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05619301404123975,0.0,0.05529171881325102,0.04455774133767791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762519455350892,0.0,0.0860334266619933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05891964234837185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20249913982670434,0.0,0.3766435529515832,0.0,0.30799700141839464,0.18762448873791615,0.10735667424443768,0.0,0.0,0.085525695297477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544111440327438,0.0,0.03657084575511724,0.0,0.0,0.05607543602285227,0.0,0.0,0.17797428905217566,0.0,0.09531303909445038,0.042755584209007054,0.043207308906612084,0.0,0.048431165568578974,0.0,0.04860484619839599,0.06013842541283531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05470259179359382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406201434768644
mentalhealth,ciaski90,2020/01/10,"Split personality disorder Can anyone tell me what or how long does it take for someone to be diagnosed with a split personality disorder. My abusive ex signed himself in last week as he was suicidal, but has pulled this card any time I kicked him out over violence. I do believe he has had some sort of breakdown as he has been off the rales on cocaine and believe all sorts of stuff about me and what I get up to and that I'm an evil person...I'm not at all btw. I'm not buying the diagnoses he has told me so looking for anyone that can enlighten me pls",6.326489675516221,5.523185026548674,7.105442477876108,77.66429941002951,65.99115044247786,10.719174041297935,33.877581120943944,10.125756701596842,3.1040218289085537,440,17,92,9,6,147,82,113,0.16699999999999998,0.7859999999999999,0.047,-0.9423,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,4,0,11,2,0,1,2,17,17,9,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,7,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,4,1,10,0,17,12,3,12,0,0,1,0,11,7,0,4,4,61,17,0,0.0,0.20091193761398196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531296477380006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371336479417023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3820931533645501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34421861778496043,0.0,0.0,0.3886823048101486,0.0,0.14839127058884907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859298050655108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382216427719724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500635282937909,0.14239553698039525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4441842166330106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14367555000527016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941163231596113,0.18548133380155304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12749503918114746,0.0,0.1482110756803202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887724475985717,0.0,0.0,0.16203076940893024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601829485978864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beckyassbitch,2020/01/10,Visual hallucinations? I am a 20 year old female. I have anxiety (managed very well with medicine) and OCD. Lately (2-3 days) I’ve been seeing things. They resemble people and usually come in color. Anything from bright to shades of grey and cream white. I see kids and adults. It’s kind of out of the corner of my eye but lately it’s been more vivid. I always saw things out the corner of my eye sometimes but it wasn’t ever really clear as people until now. I don’t have delusions. I’m sleeping and eating normally and not much in my life has changed. Any ideas?,1.1997321428571441,3.757696651785718,2.806785714285713,89.1882142857143,86.94642857142857,5.342857142857143,18.714285714285715,6.868970318607317,0.3487607142857141,443,12,87,6,14,145,80,112,0.013000000000000001,0.9009999999999999,0.086,0.7647,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,8,5,3,0,2,17,13,10,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,10,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,4,11,9,3,14,9,2,16,0,0,11,0,3,6,0,0,9,53,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15493201417823094,0.0,0.0,0.1266213209901515,0.0,0.14244129332292965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322544708040325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19697325546887506,0.16039346483641426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008258692757973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19052748375669915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16842714475019774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21019536925202664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193897017331412,0.0,0.0,0.4200798904023629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13151746136288786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368772741793415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824349328792909,0.0,0.0,0.1953839358524884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25817310087349177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11928348550809954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967520914119103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18633290553861748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841550135493524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474039334900543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20507127051714488,0.15363320936343952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674147548278117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990568754904403
mentalhealth,ella206950,2020/01/10,"Feel bad for spending So I just brought a new phone and spent quite a bit of money on it. And now i feel bad and woried I made a bad decision. However I have no reason to I have researched into this phone , gone to, apple store to look at it and saved up money to buy it. I have no financial responsibility’s so that money was for me to spend on what I want. I have brought other things in the past that have cost this amount but thats been with birthday and Christmas money and i have never felt bad. So why dose this make me feel so bad?

This may be the wrong sub but everyone is always helpful hear",1.8289393939393928,3.5022915476190484,3.299494949494949,91.80863636363638,77.96825396825399,6.169119769119768,20.978354978354982,6.980632752743323,0.29234285714285724,469,12,106,5,11,154,75,126,0.18,0.769,0.051,-0.9505,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,5,0,11,1,0,3,1,23,24,12,0,1,3,0,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,13,8,0,0,6,0,10,3,3,6,0,0,8,6,11,1,15,14,2,13,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,1,4,72,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137427455577573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7093164039435105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854918662923373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235116841171124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577266791555082,0.0,0.1631351028121935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149488204147586,0.0,0.11388350141327044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14267710935220715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607678822417092,0.11341266917753738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104093571453604,0.1640949638838381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621932077753818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180714502832341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469027157407765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11287709581818715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021416108784052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533125142011984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18576405609741573,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,haydenbrucker,2020/01/10,"i can feel my mental health declining hi, i'm new here and my name is hayden and i am a 17 year old trans male. in the past few years, my mental health has gone way downhill. i've been diagnosed with adhd, autism, anxiety, depression, and gender dysphoria. i've attempted suicide twice over the past 3 and a half years. i thought things were getting better but they seem to be getting worse. im stressed out and having anxiety attacks thinking about what i want to do in the future. i just cut ties with my dad a few days too because i learned that he was gaslighting me all my life and that can only be harmful to my mental health. i also suspect that i might have bpd and/or schizophrenia. i haven't been diagnosed but it's just a suspicion (im very anti self diagnosis). help?",2.512748917748919,4.798541227272729,3.5854285714285723,87.64290476190477,78.28571428571428,6.704069264069265,25.85108225108225,7.793537801064563,1.5500931601731598,615,24,121,10,15,198,102,154,0.20199999999999999,0.754,0.044000000000000004,-0.9747,0,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,1,2,6,6,2,1,7,0,16,6,0,0,1,23,25,9,1,1,4,1,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,2,6,9,0,0,6,0,0,1,1,5,0,2,6,1,17,1,10,16,3,15,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,2,9,74,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15550314323300554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347413937972767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19796791088216995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720123138496244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887570770370322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144360496301489,0.0,0.0,0.16296375533572746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834466548035503,0.0,0.11144449779843166,0.2626587990619135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542410598660219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520317997269532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4126105583935796,0.0,0.0,0.08672823036017371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795295167617569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139286952243013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3911878538009575,0.1372636733665564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496687976791986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577435551979267,0.0,0.0,0.09840787954904086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24703718646219436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11779293839168599,0.13498329750212104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821724472460904,0.0,0.0,0.14153303124107314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08596179997119748,0.08290869121669248,0.0,0.10272220283416918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676133581169596,0.07631831424499046,0.1027047550595145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318607424171011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24997117668497004
mentalhealth,tjf2001,2020/01/10,"I have been diagnosed with all these mental health issues and just would like to know what my outlook for life might be? Paranoid personality disorder (PPD)

Schizoid personality disorder (SPD)

Schizotypal personality disorder (STPD)

Borderline personality disorder (BPD)

Avoidant personality disorder (APD)

Histrionic personality disorder (HPD)

Obsessive compulsive personality disorder  (OCPD) 

Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD)

Clinical Depression 

Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder (ADHD)",12.311406250000005,17.703342328125004,12.34975,17.920250000000017,71.03125,19.435,56.4,12.516099999999998,13.20836125,415,32,32,27,10,138,50,64,0.43,0.541,0.028999999999999998,-0.9847,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,3,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,9,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,7,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,3,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,7,0,0,1,1,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559366723683356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001799878468424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685091504675008,0.08073315211618695,0.0,0.0,0.8204551240409695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454910856341706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830208702004624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04371403864237584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056182655702693166,0.03886005727361429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015932614152399,0.08438117482838739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4861692163711178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617896214519664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297999184106986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111474968537683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056504142186102425,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Karaethon22,2020/01/10,"Australian fires/friendship drama I have a friend (former friend?) who lives in the US but is originally from Australia. Much of her family still lives there, including her brother who she is very close to. When I first heard about the bushfires I looked at a map, and her hometown is surrounded by flames.

I've been sick with worry ever since. But we had a major fight in July and August and haven't spoken since September, unless you count leaving her a ""happy birthday"" text, which she never responded to (and she ignored my birthday). I really want to check on her, but I don't know how or even if I should. If she's struggling I want to help her, but I'm also worried about dragging up more emotional baggage at the worst possible time. I'm also starting to really overthink it and can't tell if it's ""too late"" at this point.

What should I do? If I should message her, what do I even say? I very firmly believe in venting out, not in. As in, this upsets me but it's bound to upset her more, so my feelings should absolutely not be a burden to her.",3.7288461538461526,5.216507269230776,4.740576923076926,84.2294230769231,72.46153846153847,7.315384615384616,26.461538461538463,7.865858978985527,1.5524942307692309,824,28,160,11,16,269,124,208,0.156,0.752,0.092,-0.9533,0,0,0,0,1,0,32.0,2,1,0,1,13,10,1,3,8,0,16,1,0,2,2,36,25,22,0,10,13,1,1,0,2,4,1,2,0,0,10,9,0,2,2,1,1,0,6,7,0,1,3,4,30,3,26,17,5,26,0,0,1,0,28,15,0,5,11,124,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487330183714118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17521386890137192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17493515913686236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20543439664718613,0.14067360072460405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466071395424697,0.0,0.07863382799725366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322822770701152,0.0,0.0,0.24030336351636505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16555023311951628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423944883625423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546781525814291,0.0,0.17542941448821314,0.1646695455981068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746478822679107,0.0,0.1305947135086154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432254013885275,0.0,0.1199439316877076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470133838980099,0.17532151561513445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992557368147843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236729829841964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572897537691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11007539712604487,0.0,0.12419569808321078,0.0,0.0,0.16257963861877953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13592829787874586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068293659872642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18706723182636276,0.0,0.0,0.2566348409466416,0.1834553519649129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158691610161141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cata333,2020/01/10,"Interesting title Hi! I am really confused about whats going on with me.   
It's been years since I started to isolate myself from people and recently I even dont want to talk to my friends. I feel like friends only need you to spend a good time with and thats it. I even feel hatred towards people that didnt do anything bad to me. I just hate soicializing with anyone. I do have social anxiety but why the hatred towards others? I hate my family for many good reasons, strangers for no reason and dislike my friends. I enjoy being lonely but it is impossible to live a normal life without socializing, isn't it? We need it for work, relationships etc.. So what can this be, what do you think? Am I antisocial, misanthrope or what?",2.4086854460093896,4.9244423098591605,4.306225352112676,81.05027699530518,80.1267605633803,6.885258215962442,24.959624413145537,8.021203637495839,1.77522103286385,576,22,106,11,15,195,91,142,0.201,0.65,0.149,-0.8513,0,2,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,2,0,1,5,13,2,1,3,0,14,1,0,2,0,22,24,7,0,4,5,0,2,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,13,7,0,0,5,0,1,1,5,5,0,0,2,2,19,8,18,20,1,8,0,1,0,0,11,3,0,2,5,79,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232122635453196,0.0,0.0,0.10266391381591074,0.0,0.12082500603090113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12259329136976398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720785774672505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374942008166005,0.19395392449169047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384141630459155,0.0,0.14847892842467492,0.10489227928537724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3403114170500623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344440493900353,0.2463007913703211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899198793793108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10370730427042793,0.07173159996151246,0.0,0.12964974582780678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885817183352593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21773872970810387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438579706269072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11166752899136498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035808481190956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406027608678008,0.30192246004012674,0.14497262392014182,0.15763580853259096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145570140505775,0.0,0.0,0.29934053591741483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10392395631411017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801290210046432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407995297228584,0.0,0.0,0.08561522181682349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08660157710519062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248731891441934,0.0,0.0,0.14153469465484222,0.0,0.10689082757975124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455090976925257
mentalhealth,Bodaciousskin,2020/01/10,"I have an extremely unaddictive personality I know it’s very common for people to have a really addictive personality but I can’t get addicted to anything which might seem like a good thing but it’s really bad. Our brains are wired to get addicted and to always find dopamine and to stick to what gives it to us.

No matter what I do or what I try whether it’s health or fitness related I have a very hard time sticking to anything at all. I’m even like this with girls too, I get bored of them and stop having feelings for them. 

I’m diagnosed with ADHD and ADD so maybe it’s that but I don’t know if it can be to this extent tho.

Side notes, I am an extreme procrastinator because I get sidetracked way too easily and forget what I was even wanting to do in the first place. I’m also 16 years old.",1.2226060606060578,3.5287392909090936,3.4322727272727285,86.78174242424244,83.36363636363636,6.8181818181818175,21.89393939393939,7.984000788550335,1.1773030303030296,633,21,134,13,18,216,99,165,0.10800000000000001,0.7879999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.1479,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,2,0,2,1,7,5,0,0,6,0,14,6,1,0,1,26,27,15,0,2,7,0,2,2,0,1,5,0,0,3,15,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,2,15,3,17,24,2,12,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,5,8,89,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4579365202329078,0.16828018027664787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197617274334122,0.11651017636688693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23045364714223485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691317898261587,0.08535659174386465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563117394012681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142120182069751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18496746139300127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079972868051422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797829124082072,0.11910331169597725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926245094054423,0.1343226169866887,0.0,0.11744447099550015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543291451030467,0.0,0.0,0.14883767557564184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390572442700284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13681612250241118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14067171059715847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485420501433074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14693036133411658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707417048536324,0.24452499459642865,0.14629401082641424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794043665916326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747148704362482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706532033147005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302491830909768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164841354749178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950662815183283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843017306475153,0.0,0.0,0.23106692846778026,0.08258906805705624,0.11114357136040004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017008445821184
mentalhealth,WestJobs,2020/01/10,"Please Help Me and My Family We Don’t Know What To Do I’m shaking whilst typing this sitting in my mums room scared for my life. 

For the last 2 weeks my younger brothers behaviour has become increasingly strange. He’s not the person I once knew. He speaks differently, walks differently, asks differently, has a new set of beliefs that make him think we’re plotting against him. 

I’m the oldest son, my mother and younger sister are terrified. I have to stay strong for them but the truth is I’m also dying inside. 

He’s clearly unwell, he listens to loud music every morning, speaking in ‘tongues’ saying praise God praise Jesus, laughing to himself. But it’s gang music. We’re all so terrified, he just came into the room we were all sitting together, my mum, sister and I, and says, ‘are you guys enjoying all of this?’  We ask for what but he just keeps asking and eventually leaves. It’s so uncomfortable, he thinks I’m the enemy. I don’t know if he will kill me in my sleep. 

We tried to get help from a social worker but in the UK unless he becomes a threat to himself or others nothing can be done. So we are supposed to wait until he hurts one of us or himself? 

I don’t want to live like this. I’m trying so hard for my family but I feel like I’m about to break. What do I do in this situation?",2.5843162960504458,4.470420156488551,4.165585794888816,85.48656654497181,76.44274809160305,6.846598075008298,24.36840358446732,7.7425588080867325,1.2495115831397277,1019,34,206,15,23,340,145,262,0.133,0.713,0.153,0.6048,3,0,0,0,0,1,30.0,6,1,1,4,8,13,2,2,10,0,18,2,1,1,5,40,40,20,2,2,12,7,2,2,0,1,1,6,2,2,10,12,0,2,7,0,0,4,4,5,0,1,4,8,30,8,28,34,4,23,4,1,0,0,45,8,0,3,8,121,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022279432104364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514874050408775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768244397386627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143339038180803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13006813099785133,0.39281556597927575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825154625159135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559217824003647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362915432549629,0.0,0.06336836196211952,0.08953259551788242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547742546679856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409199476842933,0.0,0.0,0.11226707328950816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16800614424667967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341635896583506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113951041612142,0.13865414876609725,0.0,0.13775128570819975,0.10215704744046897,0.0,0.1327016582476822,0.0,0.0,0.08852113986609315,0.12245546324208753,0.0,0.11066475370047102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365577551087662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104019383974295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025324199206135,0.0,0.0,0.13346761692418802,0.08492383381315385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942943324185682,0.0,0.137569815589383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19932780967884,0.12547273534481312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087116529032798,0.125416055190782,0.1277536121199355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358035755956355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16060709964919848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17017563908558267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15075120160802416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392025444574983,0.0,0.10052859394593086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,joaonardini,2020/01/10,"20 years alone... Today (january 10) is my 21 birthday, and i realized how alone i am. I dont have no one to share my moments and achievements . I dont know if the problem is really who i am, but im pretty sure that i am a awesome person, but that seems to make no effect in other peoples life. 
It just get worse everyday, everything seems to lose the meaning, i worked so hard to be a good person, and now everything i have is me. 
I trully need some advice beside ""go to the doctor"" or ""try to be better"", cus those really dont affect me at all, it never did. Everyone looks at me like a though guy, with a perfect social life, but in the reality im just a lonely guy who wants to be corresponded.",4.945810344827585,4.180315606896549,6.9408189655172405,77.58295258620694,68.79310344827586,10.00862068965517,29.15948275862069,9.516144504307137,2.3953620689655173,533,16,112,10,8,190,89,145,0.105,0.7020000000000001,0.193,0.9416,0,4,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,6,6,9,0,0,9,0,15,3,0,4,4,28,25,11,0,4,7,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,4,8,4,0,0,6,0,0,1,6,3,0,1,1,2,14,6,12,21,2,11,0,2,1,0,8,4,0,5,7,78,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271954310121262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26962273156316474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512009276816194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322907829330355,0.0,0.0,0.4576561504763154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12437794174041646,0.23396726504839305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800567946600364,0.0,0.07397559437720476,0.10917596842181396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25776702001815643,0.0,0.0,0.11660199750193267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2812004084819007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153511088071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838783434376576,0.06359189386825448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930555885928407,0.14562099603503229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868859429691134,0.0,0.0,0.1417875091869771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651547015566067,0.10039103523160428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820296430637714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023980849545374,0.22730957755709744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242428729361105,0.0,0.12455003156807345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16677367010741678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23699409476142425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132686511946898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226786822170958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788614946951435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338090870353602,0.0,0.0,0.08837328195230199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767745080696876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476144637215073,0.0,0.13264894190769205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382179433358952
mentalhealth,shannondion,2020/01/11,"My internal emotions and responses are out of control It’s getting to the point where I cannot cope and feel mildly suicidal. If someone gets upset with me I instantly feel like the most awful person in the world and will turn to self harm almost instantly but if they apologise everything goes back to normal. I try to set up appointments with my GP but as soon as the situation is over or I have had time to cool down I feel like I’m being silly and I have everything under control. 
My rage responses are terrible and I have been really irritable the last few months. I have always had strong suicidal ideation but have only made 1 attempt which resulted in psychological intervention and medication. I just want to stop existing.",5.807080291970806,7.490282445255474,6.979277372262776,69.42585036496352,67.61313868613138,11.319416058394161,32.678102189781015,11.20814326018867,4.315056058394161,593,26,100,20,10,200,92,137,0.2,0.6829999999999999,0.11599999999999999,-0.9454,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,4,4,9,1,1,5,2,14,1,0,4,0,28,23,14,2,4,7,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,9,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,4,14,5,18,17,2,17,0,0,0,0,3,10,0,5,8,71,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16710967207261426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13886040178193934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832307437750282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3743479662089125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18772142290374852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999681739819992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531438646098202,0.2384431445615624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743794328288009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603228796134334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630616512081027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157909158450944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16811752202670058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332047801494953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351035138249007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692238618287138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457161943024783,0.0,0.0,0.15775880473311948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069098133878916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174095837572273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875839934918926,0.0,0.0,0.14139980830327967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13952203938624685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36508682294815226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973110835774592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330291017653825,0.1815212752456931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843218447361438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pendlebury-Pies10,2020/01/11,escitaloprám I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this but my doctor has very recently started me on escitaloprám. I just have a quick question concerning alcohol. I wouldn't say I'm a big drinker but I do occasionally like going out for a beer when I can. And I have an event coming up that I've been going to for many years at my local pub anyways my question is can I still enjoy a beer or should I avoid alcohol completely? Thanks,1.0805394605394592,3.560591879120881,3.5858141858141863,84.08873126873128,86.25274725274723,6.825574425574428,22.558441558441558,8.00094639256281,1.438969230769231,355,13,73,8,11,123,64,91,0.049,0.8190000000000001,0.132,0.845,0,1,5,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,6,0,11,5,0,0,1,15,18,6,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,3,3,4,1,2,3,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,1,11,4,8,15,0,19,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,4,8,50,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4423128492314579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782608885653069,0.21697314244967425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21181233680004705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352180726900026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110065921286628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20980515295443689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21620874298910234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19819176376409506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4636413671971282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043287456854357,0.0,0.0,0.17672602812046065,0.0,0.16456736534610766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647352766427993,0.0,0.16526292426767436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19503894111425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19052297869144685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17074755783970635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13326287594277325
mentalhealth,depressionsuxs,2020/01/11,"Isn't not wanting to get better a symptom of the depression? People talk so dismissively about people who ""don't want to get better"". But can't that be caused by the depression itself?",4.319904761904763,6.526513371428571,5.48,76.55333333333336,72.42857142857143,8.095238095238095,25.952380952380953,8.841846274778883,2.2513809523809525,148,5,25,3,3,49,27,35,0.231,0.6940000000000001,0.075,-0.7254,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,1,0,5,8,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,7,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,18,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4853198961205468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28185586793793976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4726328134320009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866963403210177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3804303265560242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851778107385689,0.0,0.22053001202568726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3236637096542689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mkm9298,2020/01/11,"Im struggling more than ever before I feel like im losing it.

I have struggled with anxiety since my teens (28 now) and it is ruining my life.
I sell cars for a living. What a joke. Every time i wake up i want to disappear. In the last year i have put on 4 stone, developed an addiction to alcohol, cocaine and cannabis, i have a broken impacted wisdom tooth that pains me severly every day but i can't deal with it.
I hate myself and i dont know what to do.",0.16816307403936293,2.302362742268045,3.0552764761012163,88.86392689784442,86.5257731958763,6.8262417994376765,21.189315838800376,8.00094639256281,1.2040391752577315,354,12,77,8,11,125,70,97,0.205,0.722,0.073,-0.875,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,2,9,1,2,5,0,7,6,2,0,1,10,11,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,5,1,0,2,1,1,3,2,6,0,0,0,1,14,3,10,11,1,12,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,7,49,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19946311620532264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19553811752859074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13997071329289726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569306383365708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799980858222085,0.18863290931053414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21443819669928574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550585183977853,0.30831839160497515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251457714220478,0.13071302394927647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806439158099324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39527563505834695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055492641349376,0.14914408000163842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292363502744967,0.08938936600070828,0.0,0.16156489731051388,0.0,0.0,0.2046954056586346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19469181765704316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18393428820924304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20670278524422225,0.0,0.15135377088472415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3825576574823286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669064125604504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791980209904717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782597744367188
mentalhealth,oODillyOo,2020/01/11,"So I had an appointment with my Psychiatrist the other day So I saw my Psychiatrist a couple of days ago, and something he said it still kind of going through my mind.  I see him about every four months, but my last appointment was cancelled (think it was when I had a separate health issue going on, and another specialist appointment got scheduled for the same day as his appointment, so I had to pick which to go to and which to cancel) so I hadn't seen him since last May.  

I am on Disability (primary reason is physical issues, secondary is mental health), so I kind of just see him for med renewal and because sometimes Disability needs an update from him.  Basically I see him because I have to (I've had other Docs, there isn't any other choices that wouldn't take several months to get in to, I don't expect much out of it, so it is what it is; I wouldn't say it's the greatest Doc-Pt relationship).  

Usually he wants to get updated about my physical issues, which I understand, but the majority of my time gets used up (only have about 20 minutes with him, he's always late and behind schedule), leaving barely any time to cover psych issues.  So this time I made sure I got things directed to mental health right away, as I have been experiencing an increase in some symptoms, and wanted to talk about what has been going on (I usually only kind of cover the basics, don't really get in deep to a lot of my stuff).  I commented that I think it is time to go to the next dose of my main med, which he agreed.  The whole time I was talking, he kept yawning (a lot).  To the point I obviously noticed, as I get he's a busy guy, and maybe gets the afternoon drowsies, but come on dude, really.  Anyway, I tell him all the stuff that's been going on with me, get it all out, I've finished sharing, it's his turn to comment.  ""Well hang in there and stay alive"". Are you kidding me?!  That's your wise advice, hang in there and stay alive, lol.  Anyway, I don't know what I was expecting, I know there isn't any thing magical he can say that is really going to help me, but it just seemed so, I don't know, callous or something (not even sure of what to call it).  This has been going through my mind since the appointment, and I thought maybe just sharing it here will  help get it out of my brain and not make it a big deal or anything.  So, thanks for listening.",6.301165254237291,5.466324989406783,7.023199999999999,78.33705423728816,66.05508474576271,10.518101694915254,31.80372881355932,9.888512548439397,2.767096169491525,1833,61,379,35,25,610,201,472,0.005,0.88,0.114,0.9943,0,0,2,0,0,0,70.0,0,2,0,0,27,10,0,0,20,1,37,7,1,5,5,62,81,30,0,7,11,0,0,0,0,4,6,4,0,2,36,18,0,1,9,0,0,12,11,0,1,1,21,10,52,10,60,56,12,58,0,0,5,0,36,19,0,7,25,258,88,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778622649611016,0.0614911087528481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057720260658352625,0.0,0.0,0.14151915001986842,0.0727390613194827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057084475354456266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517411530504022,0.0,0.0,0.08457295110171498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743833734995448,0.07083313139465408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059754936043134185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675507432783392,0.0,0.13421109100180548,0.0715160158918707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045817328656761504,0.0,0.058446066156670515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899379862702716,0.0,0.3153903473252598,0.0,0.1109608674273174,0.0,0.0,0.06868585397738193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212068429874333,0.0,0.0,0.0929926665500444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896113262639395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167102733532798,0.11436956162651488,0.11308939075966375,0.07825084086063437,0.07345136757585308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794946429900535,0.0,0.06563827894177293,0.046304101983591986,0.0,0.13938023366055066,0.0,0.1541058291101449,0.0,0.13981453518985842,0.0,0.14008509153094265,0.0,0.11073876400330902,0.0,0.05099392779304926,0.051435963291216434,0.0,0.0,0.07377432943981624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789766498068985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551594435625887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06557578124140323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13331797005834845,0.07132250928549314,0.0,0.0744759526422625,0.0,0.05924043458151197,0.06598545637991073,0.11032944433507773,0.0,0.0,0.16583346080593436,0.06315059927037374,0.0,0.07836681164729407,0.0,0.11476490208892742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068067273012704,0.06860735297343469,0.0,0.0,0.14787546852968975,0.055397880877825566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15882097971330014,0.0,0.0,0.13075823357553745,0.07210057170761497,0.05215657988402622,0.11151176106275376,0.06063124383557295,0.06386531839980131,0.0,0.0,0.09217087639821148,0.08889723962308503,0.0,0.05507094700176463,0.2022470422438396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545315430291888,0.0,0.07221519461663915,0.0,0.05991222755318304,0.1527995004850624,0.0,0.08183083545891097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06237073298226858,0.0,0.0,0.0774476027855813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lildanibb,2020/01/11,I’m scared that I just hallucinated I was in my room and I saw this big bug buzzing and flying towards me and now I can’t see it anymore or hear it. I’m too scared to go back into my room. I haven’t been sleeping much and I’m not on lexapro anymore I’m so scared.,-1.7115983606557352,0.17544298360656008,1.1181762295081974,100.62677254098362,94.57377049180329,3.705737704918033,19.100409836065573,5.148860815047168,-0.6892803278688522,206,7,54,1,8,71,40,61,0.156,0.8440000000000001,0.0,-0.8271,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,3,0,0,4,1,1,0,0,8,12,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,3,8,0,5,9,1,10,0,0,2,0,1,7,0,1,2,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4766414935348251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847818507730181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365724502054301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.270844334954629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17665386967885147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7217700343826338,0.0,0.1914941892199011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24048132905373604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HuntersMaker,2020/01/11,"My new girlfriend has anxiety and is taking serraline (Zoloft). Please help me understand her conditions. I met this girl (24) at school about 6 weeks ago. She is very intelligent and organized, with a 3.85 GPA. She's also quite an artist who sings and draws really well, at a professional level even. She speaks 4 languages without an accent and is learning a 5th atm. On top of that, she likes traveling (been to 20+ countries), photography (takes amazing photos), anime, video games, etc. We began dating and shortly entered a relationship. 

Before we officially entered a relationship, she told me that she had a traumatic past. Her parents did not care for her and were always busy. They left her to her grandparents when she was a kid. Her last birthday with her dad was actually the first time they celebrated together. She and her dad had just started living together again last year. According to her, her mother has very high expectations of her, while always accusing her for things she has no control over, such as being ugly (which she is not, she’s gorgeous), not having perfectly straight, long legs etc. Her mother keeps telling her not to cause trouble for other people, so she speaks for outsiders instead of defending her own daughter. The last time they spent a good time together was when she came over to Canada (her mother works abroad) and they watched Stranger Things on Netflix together. They bonded well according to her, and I can tell that it meant a great deal to her.

She had 4 ex’s before me, but all of them were the “avoidant type”, so they didn’t commit and dumped her after some time. The longest relationship lasted about 1.5 years and her ex was abusive. He threatened her with a knife. As a result, she went suicidal. She showed me the scars on her leg she inflicted herself. The others all had their problems, and they were all stingy and wouldn’t buy her an occasional drink. I don’t blame them though since they were probably students too and had no money at the time. Feeling she was mistreated, I voluntarily paid for everything while we were together even when she asked to split the bills. I even gifted her a Kate Spade purse. She said it was the most expensive thing anyone has ever bought for her. 

We took a trip during the holidays. On the first day, she said her throat was swollen up and felt miserable. We thought it could be an allergic reaction. I bought some OTC med from a pharmacy, and then rushed her to the hospital. The staff determined it was not an emergency so she was not a top-priority patient. They were also short of staff at Christmas. We waited for hours and eventually decided to take off as the symptoms lessened. At the hospital, I learned that she was taking Sertraline or Zoloft. She said she would get cramps, panic attacks, etc if she doesn’t take it. It made me realize her mental condition may be more severe than I initially thought since she’d need medication to stay normal. She also regularly visits a psychiatrist. On our last day back while I was driving, she suddenly burst into tears while telling me her past. There I had my first shock. I had dated some girls but had never seen anything like this. Spontaneously, I tried to comfort her, but I seemed to make it worse. It went on for about an hour and I didn’t know what to make of it.

Since then, we see each other almost every day. Most of the time, she’s fine, but on some days, she would suddenly have a meltdown as telling me things. I’d say it happens about once every 2-3 days on average. Other than that, she seems completely normal, just an overall excellent and talented student, not strange at all. 

Yesterday, we had a date at a restaurant. In the end, out of a sudden, she had another attack – first time in public. She looked down on the table miserably. Her eyes got teary and her cheeks turned red. I tried calming her down. She texted me that talking makes her anxious, so don’t talk to her for a while. I was really confused and frustrated. I did nothing wrong at all, and all I had been doing was trying to make her feel happy. I had great sympathy for her because unlike her, I was very well raised and I had a very healthy relationship. In about 20 minutes, she returned to normal. We went to see a movie. She leaned on me and held my hand but I did not return the favor as I was still recovering. In fact, I was thinking about it the whole time. As we walked out, we remained silent for two minutes. I tried to break the silence by “how did you like the movie?” I didn’t hear anything back. I turned my head and looked at her face. I saw fear, sorrow, anxiety, the kind of expression one would only see in an anime. A thousand things came into my mind at once. In the past, my loving, caring ex would check on me to see if I was okay. She was also highly intelligent (masters from the best University in Canada), organized, and probably superior to me in just about every way. Should any conflict happen between us, she would be the one to step up and resolve. She was strong and I guess at some level subconsciously I depended on her. This time, I realized it’s quite different. I looked at her eyes and paused briefly. I didn’t know what to say and don’t remember exactly what I said (I panicked too), but I tried to make her think everything was okay with an awkward smile. It was probably the way I said it, or the nervousness, she thought I was being sarcastic, and I was angry. She thought I was about to hurt her or beat her up. My heart was broken. I always have a soft spot for the weak, or cute animals, disabled people or women, etc. I have never been violent with a girl before. I’ve never even argued with a girl before. If there was a conflict I did not want to confront, I would just walk away from it, not a good solution, but never violence. The way my girlfriend looked at me in fear really crushed me inside. I still ensured her she was safe with me and I would never hurt her. 

She told me she had anxiety, OCD, and I just had to accept it. I know nothing about mental health as I don’t have any family members with these problems, but I think of it as a normal illness such as a cold or fever that can happen to anyone, and it’s perfectly normal. If I treat her well, maybe she will eventually climb out of her shadow. However, she’s against the idea of someone changing her, but I do want to make her completely normal again. I’m not just messing around, but I like to think I’m dating a potential life partner. I want to help and be the one she can depend on. She said she was normal in primary school. She changed sometime during high school. 

Can people help me understand her conditions and what I can do to help? So far, everything I’ve done just seems to make her feel worse. I have never invested this much energy and effort in a relationship (my ex was strong). Please keep in mind that the above is my own perspective and try to be objective as I can’t understand her side.",4.42031266560678,6.053252534534536,5.050238473767884,82.11407790143086,70.95195195195195,8.526832715068009,27.848613319201554,9.061647067312856,2.2567611199434725,5464,197,1046,110,102,1755,509,1332,0.129,0.75,0.121,-0.8901,5,1,1,0,0,0,190.0,13,1,12,20,53,64,7,9,75,2,112,24,10,14,18,213,201,89,1,28,39,11,6,4,3,11,12,11,0,7,46,66,1,9,31,9,11,17,31,26,4,9,94,32,215,38,148,87,24,158,0,5,14,1,190,65,0,26,75,755,261,14,0.0,0.04429365429630537,0.03648116675213508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03313845641181165,0.0,0.03743444548393915,0.0,0.0,0.11958314914164632,0.0933188739331342,0.0,0.0,0.05084449095689061,0.0392001422947204,0.08579544495680318,0.04223301912386194,0.0,0.05227920226488614,0.0,0.06152731465383333,0.033279481033556116,0.03494877842174682,0.0850588703228714,0.035123282422752346,0.0574916229867143,0.0,0.022788799149540868,0.0,0.127243338972343,0.0,0.039231960118361685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855141472392376,0.07623048982846709,0.03840342952420989,0.07909414329373078,0.0,0.07839234297557912,0.0,0.04192907675320473,0.029847898322868795,0.0,0.0,0.12054719452804954,0.038541025254637616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03905808281928674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038256575978920224,0.0,0.036621862355545334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033110924043689885,0.0,0.1667711415825682,0.09876650978601297,0.033815760138896374,0.0944923154773158,0.0,0.10079436560948896,0.0,0.03524209119466128,0.08413426889617241,0.056707071959379136,0.0,0.03589428166530605,0.0,0.0,0.12719446232949586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01953147681635522,0.0,0.0,0.06271146506814243,0.029899215864168795,0.08243147658972841,0.041182437232145125,0.0,0.09917503279149646,0.03979571821060812,0.0,0.0,0.03836653313882652,0.039737199263484284,0.042134225650835994,0.044299947331432415,0.10023021180095568,0.1184940162431918,0.0,0.0,0.07363096593582855,0.0,0.08004019774234385,0.0422017258528925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645682474132893,0.0,0.03892944358494661,0.06163542680668814,0.1523638100831071,0.0,0.0,0.04061757538354197,0.0,0.026405262252234225,0.07305528659069349,0.0,0.033010553727168275,0.0330834599659271,0.12557180550345676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03374031189769601,0.035373426984393566,0.17467769690202425,0.0,0.0375570215882174,0.0,0.041524940795087686,0.03766021520566922,0.07534809461233256,0.0,0.07549390137525816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02748137231073694,0.02771959169538591,0.1729960079151493,0.036105477925775134,0.0,0.0,0.25639710025638035,0.07174147093643625,0.0,0.0,0.07962498974584116,0.07599662995845875,0.02843204158876932,0.0,0.04386179919851332,0.041510252406896174,0.0,0.10706111530376118,0.07775159698635375,0.0,0.0,0.08207230643717829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091808050960848,0.0715424380184078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952448190304454,0.0,0.0,0.0718470007988783,0.0,0.0,0.20068089195492456,0.04234852377020936,0.0,0.21336315585214333,0.05945814860376916,0.0,0.11350311289956568,0.11916009808020245,0.10209834025171008,0.0,0.04223301912386194,0.0,0.09277272233207867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03167514692428157,0.0,0.036973504335041575,0.0,0.026460424750875542,0.03984612464822712,0.05970945387097212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04089177664300155,0.0,0.0,0.03885605091953775,0.14053971249916036,0.06009531635272821,0.13070025060792198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241805779692962,0.09581604105466814,0.03672936412238072,0.11871414998290394,0.1961889917671844,0.0,0.0,0.07144358837803641,0.04153474389002458,0.15228675497605831,0.08132561327039542,0.03651851112145668,0.1167534686368694,0.044968072251677337,0.0,0.0,0.12338210126184115,0.06614974820741833,0.08902048943432224,0.029987005262315142,0.0,0.13444999501394864,0.1039653876974091,0.0,0.04173764404582175,0.0,0.036036620143993864,0.0,0.027215829728268345,0.0,0.07619451063287458,0.1858945028266137,0.04087328378691508,0.0,0.04814784428557102
mentalhealth,ItsChemicalR,2020/01/11,"Am I getting depressed again or am I paranoid around four years ago, I went through terrible depression that was fixed with SSRIs and even after I was off the meds all years after, I wasn't depressed and haven't felt that was since. Recently I've been feeling myself losing interest in doing anything. I get out of bed to go to work, I come home, I sleep. I can't make myself watch movies, read a book, go for a walk, I don't have the desire to function. I'm scared that I am getting depressed again, or if I am simply just fatigue. What causes depression anyway? what affects my chemical imabalance? I am terrified of going though it again",4.6182044444444434,5.917587496000007,5.308266666666668,81.74257777777778,70.03999999999999,8.115555555555558,29.88888888888889,8.515128840125781,2.3017822222222217,507,20,94,8,9,164,80,125,0.27899999999999997,0.687,0.034,-0.9849,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,8,10,0,1,4,0,15,2,1,3,1,17,27,6,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,6,6,0,0,2,2,0,6,4,9,0,1,7,3,16,1,14,20,1,19,0,7,1,0,0,4,0,3,9,69,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364720388961061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669205189077568,0.13705281180311327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15815444939987533,0.0,0.1326188146759547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6630071508136087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168598981835107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784439960985695,0.0,0.14782118221503587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24130578962301485,0.0,0.26248894730839245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544296672483207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17223654313308553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276632402829032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17100957464409244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15399691123511394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15201223484925933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413606171739455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735337270254116,0.0,0.15406643339777687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512602502315754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271805801061546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120812546942341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982842651585317
mentalhealth,Ruby_Lowe,2020/01/11,"It is difficult to find joy in life. I have a friend who has few interests, finds it hard to find peace in social interactions and yearns for a peace similar to that of being swallowed by a black hole. He comes to me to vent and although he is able to express it, he hasn't become any closer to understanding why he feels that way furthermore a solution. I can tell that it is a great source of his depression but I am not sure how to help him. Does anyone ever feel the way he feels? Does anyone have any tips?",4.159244505494506,4.879093028846154,5.1812087912087925,84.37807692307693,70.63461538461539,9.019780219780221,25.434065934065927,9.23628265651192,1.765364285714286,401,11,86,8,7,132,68,104,0.071,0.759,0.17,0.871,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,6,0,10,2,0,1,2,16,15,5,0,1,2,0,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,8,3,1,0,7,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,5,6,5,14,14,1,7,0,2,1,0,14,3,0,0,1,52,14,0,0.17710263621771774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24087173147243826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24766856216965136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19559594745500725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15255823936245178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525382410632853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099674208554589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16019947377619986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686452426314768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.485605803054645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368290574197247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19525628165726355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15864917554817454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870816389338598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250928295077661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18053383456307825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16691713871159156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15479551016895973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843700901625704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811516583609095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598075826335825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stepinonabeach,2020/01/11,"My parents have made me hysterical I realise I the title sounds like I'm some spoiled teen, but hear me out

This really started ever since I was a toddler.

Everytime I slightly disobeyed my mother, she would absolutely lose her mind. She would throw plates, smash anything she could find ( She's smashed a waffle maker, an entire fridge, she once smashed through my and my sister's room door etc.). While her hysterical reactions decreased over time, this really continued up until I moved out. While I am now a grown man and realise that kids can be blindingly stupid and obnoxious, I still believe that her actions were completely unreasonable.

The big problem is that now I also get moments of absolute hysteria. It can be triggerred by the littlest of things ( Example: If my gloves don't fit properly ). My parents used to tell me that these overreactions came from me being spoiled, but that is ridiculous since we always had very strict rules. I strongly believe that my mother is fully responsible for my illness. 

Is there a name for this illness? Is there any cure? 
Any info will help, thank you in advance.",6.219716666666668,8.174886205000009,6.0120000000000005,75.70766666666668,66.95,8.933333333333335,34.833333333333336,9.3871,3.4972833333333337,891,43,146,18,15,278,135,200,0.163,0.769,0.069,-0.9665,2,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,1,1,0,3,7,7,2,0,8,0,20,3,0,4,1,24,28,10,0,5,3,5,0,1,0,3,3,2,2,2,12,7,0,0,2,0,0,6,1,4,0,0,5,3,31,3,14,16,2,25,0,1,1,0,21,8,0,2,12,102,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268516233239408,0.13198794568353495,0.0,0.0,0.21573963426306228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13053410616167685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35743004840344506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18142369509956252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663143349877905,0.0,0.0,0.12664842437220036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17690778496121726,0.0,0.14348456612297436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14497953981096007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287453735254474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17878087204326285,0.0,0.10632238040489683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749571543268367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774597764478339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009394442978424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601651070280075,0.0,0.0,0.16859229873294104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168929473406792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3522665486030405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517818265253707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203237301079352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624309642839004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112274943671661,0.0,0.12667739904302205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864444177517274,0.1460397454874422,0.0,0.0,0.10538279357103444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249497948160293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700027937979858,0.0,0.13088148243733333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22536399742237564,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EelRoll,2020/01/11,"Nightmares every time I sleep For the past 5 years I've had nightmares that go on and off. It's become a big issue since I went to college. I have a traumatic event that happened in the past and OCD. I used to just ignore it but it's getting really annoying and I've picked up the habit to start screaming in real life which is disturbing those around me. I usually sleep with a heating pad because I can't sleep unless I feel warmth, but when I change the ac and try sleeping without it I just have a lot of hot flashes instead because of my medication. The medication I am taking is for physical problem and it's the only one currently out there that is helping me so I can't be taken off of it. A lot of the times my nightmares work with my ptsd and my ocd and it worsens it sometimes. This is affecting my schedule at school and how productive I am.

My nightmares usually get worse at random times of the year and it could happen when there's nothing going on in my life. Currently, it is hard time for me, my family, and where I am from. I am aware this is probably contributing to everything but there's nothing that can be changed since everything that is happening is something that can't be stopped. I'm aware that it's hard to find out what to do with this and I should be discussing it with my parents, but as I said earlier, it's a hard time for my family and the stress could worsen the health of those around me.

I would love if anyone had any advice or could help me out in anyway.",4.91126660914582,5.219999167213113,5.7590509059534085,82.36452976704055,68.80327868852459,9.175150992234686,30.80672993960311,9.134995656068208,2.4496229508196716,1186,45,243,21,19,390,144,305,0.132,0.809,0.059000000000000004,-0.9665,3,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,14,7,1,2,16,0,30,10,4,4,0,49,46,24,0,7,10,1,5,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,27,21,0,2,2,0,0,3,4,6,0,1,5,7,32,1,40,32,2,40,0,0,0,1,6,18,0,5,19,178,59,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027569514183398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06282367527203693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459641083544441,0.0,0.0,0.1644810889303001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11263175936400255,0.10202987467498513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19545813836225992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22128116181301535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783674535861383,0.0,0.16605594497072595,0.0,0.17418112770550678,0.0,0.046711670656376304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443647882583391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653271251230616,0.0,0.10500688826308296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245082208039776,0.0,0.2482713324445554,0.0,0.0,0.09819891420944736,0.0,0.0,0.12384488781625524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642395347425747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305058298342563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708161423929776,0.08337935372527633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861325060968359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17728815015456986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06260117877637801,0.07026150973203205,0.0,0.0,0.10258049863778657,0.0,0.17638024272372868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099604605880763,0.08839814913377872,0.1079908989832562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10515219189727916,0.05918297882439905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787748266662157,0.0,0.0,0.09349662828713716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15284050830823226,0.0,0.36979926788044576,0.0,0.0,0.0711210230407189,0.09136924714157676,0.0,0.06538923296601076,0.0,0.0,0.07723640740606161,0.10582452777557684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06946059323011958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693466397630232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272206003570029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978933581986164,0.2034938635270628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564005832046173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905401073825467,0.0,0.06725599635002588,0.0,0.09414627039082887,0.06562630292961233,0.0,0.0,0.11898337371535345
mentalhealth,opossumsaregods,2020/01/11,"Do I have DID or was it the weed talking? Not sure how to go about this, but I'll try. 

The last ~5 times I've gotten high, (weed is legal in my state,) I've noticed a feeling of like, another person inside of me or something. At first I was like, ""ah it's just the weed haha"" but then the last 2 times i don't remember all of it, but i do remember not feeling in control, like I wasn't driving my body or something?? And (i was on the phone with my boyfriend) I referred to myself as we, and it felt like someone else talking but i was talking too. Um, I don't know what's going on, because everything I felt during that time matched the diagnosis but it's got to be the weed talking, right?

Sorry this is such a ramble, kind of freaking out haha.",0.9178691983122356,2.71404044936709,3.0812911392405087,91.73227426160341,81.21518987341773,5.479156118143461,24.45738396624473,6.42735559955562,0.6760467510548525,573,22,127,5,15,195,88,158,0.044000000000000004,0.785,0.171,0.9645,0,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,0,2,5,9,0,0,9,3,14,1,1,2,2,28,23,13,0,0,11,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,5,0,1,8,0,0,3,5,1,2,1,10,4,16,8,16,12,1,19,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,3,11,83,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14929304283002245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679073514320902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814699645797267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15968614104705867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893639500651144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279578479488417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397858149164558,0.10171302918983333,0.2734054631599213,0.0,0.0,0.12110446034564926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16183046556167918,0.0,0.11387063039295725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15042744920918988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14826209162151796,0.07824580792688368,0.23210994137178256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27822975610506673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16209536043373335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431672591612533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32256719506171805,0.12158783158338544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063423216325728,0.21921510979482745,0.0,0.15937762732994398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418714932153056,0.0,0.0,0.4577438811664698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490607587634701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666356507141163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Repulsive_Flamingo,2020/01/11,"Fear of people ""being out to get me"" Does anyone else have a fear that others (even people you have never met) might be trying to ruin your life? 

Sometimes if I'm talking with friends I will have a thought that someone nearby could be recording us, and take things we say out of context to use as blackmail.

When texting or emailing people I sometimes have a thought our conversation might get hacked, or that the person I'm texting might want to ruin my life one day, which makes me extra careful of literally everything I say, even if it's just small insignificant chatter.

When I hear about something going on in my school my first assumption is that it's about me. That someone started a fake rumor about me, or somehow dug up something I've done in the past and is trying to use it against me.

I wouldn't say this fear ruins my life, but it causes unnecessary stress/anxiety. Has anyone dealt with something like this before?",10.984213075060527,7.711163983050853,9.804761904761907,69.80389830508477,58.88700564971752,11.696206618240517,41.669895076674734,8.841846274778883,3.804409846650525,743,29,132,7,7,233,106,177,0.109,0.847,0.044000000000000004,-0.8504,0,0,3,0,0,0,18.0,3,2,0,1,9,10,0,3,6,0,17,3,0,4,1,28,33,11,0,5,7,0,0,1,1,5,3,4,0,1,14,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,7,0,2,4,4,19,3,21,20,1,15,0,3,0,0,16,7,0,9,8,95,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462018820750661,0.0,0.0,0.15468918905497833,0.11333816077120745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412523558866476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277938589309335,0.11363209675485238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831709334748544,0.0,0.0,0.07133753751602817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679995019462667,0.11319757107644575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240465613679574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146120356113875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994136482703195,0.0,0.0,0.3734179538932204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408908025385568,0.0,0.0,0.08546089074040701,0.0,0.11558356588762987,0.0,0.06286506549095358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467116778797853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343919815696353,0.05404091182204089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383638537792794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35203517042451704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531312330332774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495560088835554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559455378162776,0.2300595832470619,0.09658476961322844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638965130997722,0.0,0.11194830658591412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18744749646669376,0.2554705417059929,0.21880216814057246,0.0,0.07829388111211512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670913269029296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316872949347505,0.08890816376180362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734877047477487,0.0,0.0,0.17563194152391182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502006764353596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305625045181224,0.1910717250940095,0.0,0.0,0.06524360525211133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_firsthandsmoke,2020/01/11,"does anybody else experience this? Idk how to explain it, idk what is it, but for as long as i can remember, i live inside my head between my thoughts and Imagination i've never lived in reality for like even 5min contious minute, without dwelling on some thought or losing myself in a day-dream, is it a normal/common thing?",5.919677419354841,6.758106290322584,6.442096774193548,76.48314516129034,66.74193548387098,8.780645161290323,34.854838709677416,8.841846274778883,2.996438709677419,258,12,47,4,4,84,51,62,0.121,0.825,0.054000000000000006,-0.2665,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,2,0,3,1,1,1,1,12,6,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,5,1,10,4,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,2,3,33,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590185217578896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21577679188503476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059792408606463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16285846019526648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411946993501449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25305397643624417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204626093304469,0.0,0.4354551324611922,0.21820843359377887,0.0,0.275850962891918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19017150334346256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24158817765110724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793179747953651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638114600429212,0.0,0.0,0.39150120241150055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23768657938841914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ar_gh,2020/01/11,"Can someone help me out with this I always have a pit of pain in my mind, but I don't know what it is, why its there, where its from. but I know its there. I heard that it might be something I uncontiously want to forget, but that still has slight effect on me. Forgetting just seems not the way to cope with things I don't want to live with. Because it still hurts.
Is there any way to remember? I need to get over it in a normal way, if i want to stop the constant ""itching in the back of my mind"".

Thanks for reading.",2.4866363636363644,3.3217637999999994,3.3961363636363657,95.20420454545456,74.63636363636364,6.590909090909091,21.93181818181818,6.6274283507984215,0.12936363636363613,398,9,97,3,8,127,68,110,0.10400000000000001,0.805,0.091,-0.5267,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,5,0,9,2,1,1,0,26,19,4,0,6,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,12,4,0,1,5,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,12,1,19,16,0,15,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,3,5,70,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14362248388378984,0.0,0.0,0.11737837870184632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13272378910902982,0.0,0.10521935597715364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865263701204944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901798027361616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569453776333292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847788907934432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18972010098529413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15241475344223449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18310828176581104,0.3485668389449759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798557602790245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691177794742552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18366554789675632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17265326827246874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955295831274368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15713452819704884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14624897687607086,0.13288096151630274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27568764114443595,0.1443068117046958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891292863178064,0.0,0.0,0.11467212776820065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30542346083100474,0.4110211558575744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557505718012213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KwazykupcakesB99,2020/01/11,"Skipping a day with Zoloft? Hey guys


I started Zoloft generic a month and a half ago and I'm taking 50mg 


I'm thinking about skipping today since I drank a LOT. Beer + sangria and I'm probably drinking more tonight. 

Should I be concerned with skipping a dose?",1.0337087912087917,3.6226228653846166,2.057142857142857,93.54500000000002,89.57692307692308,3.740659340659341,28.582417582417587,5.288315135182226,0.9674417582417584,207,11,40,1,7,65,35,52,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,2,6,0,0,0,8,9,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,3,6,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,6,19,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30012213361581075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21834982760550695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3316699888053095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33523781670242025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878403528755675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702435750527224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650360361216366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800688422904977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23964179362871016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25456272222725856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169421707410709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209250466069758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mypoopmypants,2020/01/11,"How Can We Bring Mental Illness into Video Games? Exploring different forms of mental illness and how they can be adapted into video games.

https://goombastomp.com/can-we-really-gamify-mental-illness/",15.518266666666662,21.57248536,11.260000000000002,29.17666666666668,55.40000000000001,8.133333333333335,32.333333333333336,8.841846274778883,3.991133333333334,174,6,15,3,3,50,18,25,0.19,0.81,0.0,-0.6597,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,0,7,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,12,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32662536859865765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.94515388619409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Radistoteles,2020/01/11,"""How my life was fucked up, than get better and now is starting to fuck up again probably because of me"" I've been through some pretty serious shit last 2,5 years. From summer to Nov 2017 I was almost constantly in deep depression fluctuations to better rarely and never longer than week. Then I was completly numb for 2-3 weeks. After that it was like manic-depressive for 1,25 year. Pretty periodic, deep depression and failing everything or I had lucky as fuck and was happy no matter what until some fucking detail thrown me down again. Sometimes dep. wasn't so bad sometimes it was worse than normally, from time to time I was stabile for longer time or numb for a while. In beginnig of summer it gets much better, I was more happy than depressed for the first time after almost 2 years. But after some time I begin to feel empty and numb. Not like the depressed numb more like the feel: something's wrong here, something's missing. For past 4 months I haven't been really happy or sad. Only thing that's intense now is anxiety that is like when there's something  I am anxious about I just don't do that and go somewhere where I will be alone. The depression rate is rising, but is still bearable. For past 2-3 months I have problems with sleeping, I watch tv till early morning or I am waking up x times a night. Also my memory is useless lately I read something and it's like 1st person look, watching through eyes of someone who reads, hearing the words, but couldn't save them to memory.

I'm just afraid that I'm coming back down and that I want to come back down just to feel the pain at least. I tried physical pain but it's only for minutes/hours or everyone is looking weird at you and has stupid questions.

Thanks for hearing me out I just needed to straighten up my mind. It helped a little.
Sorry for headline, grammar etc.

""So if I survive than I'll see you tomorrow, yeah I'll see you tomorrow""",3.273088235294118,5.504373819892473,3.9980265654648974,85.8861574952562,75.58602150537635,6.6345351043643275,25.18848829854523,7.618777277803332,1.3981281467425677,1519,53,284,21,34,483,198,372,0.188,0.706,0.107,-0.9815,0,1,4,0,0,0,43.0,0,3,1,6,20,41,6,1,9,1,29,15,4,1,1,49,55,29,0,6,15,0,3,5,0,1,7,2,0,1,15,13,0,0,4,3,0,4,7,27,0,1,12,12,28,14,51,40,8,64,0,9,7,4,10,16,5,13,49,184,43,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15173220180026875,0.07846803314781847,0.0,0.060587963448185275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05795879347411336,0.08559107658060221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651475570257552,0.0632592741943942,0.04618466530815126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010197108294449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052692075711067,0.07943648323219935,0.0818733197438491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3915294313877005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449621792823163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239517527889165,0.0680912584887924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492475412430585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444430916686074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801681691229411,0.07916649875388061,0.0,0.04305808607506227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419546437081305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17078171578349166,0.0,0.050782609862590256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461168742914302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617572828439694,0.08546441499678308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053513929869269485,0.1850708509277806,0.0759348303597497,0.0,0.0,0.12724434866578435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649943608136818,0.0,0.12094724579209973,0.0,0.05569481630214166,0.05617760095778456,0.0584334045918667,0.0,0.0,0.0710988183596512,0.07423204571193291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524295915620494,0.16123519820995166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14464947583460008,0.0,0.06615367837555032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15415723006273274,0.08168575918070214,0.07249534153878158,0.0,0.0,0.08487234704555931,0.0,0.15156780490566407,0.0,0.048535973945158115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074724104169185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777700411462725,0.0,0.0,0.07581811522210967,0.0,0.06419408278974342,0.2333054665260759,0.14986387933633424,0.0848109232361615,0.053625724331127375,0.0,0.06050474894854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975275940284707,0.0,0.0,0.050333836317130176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26506948618201925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05143837522460672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04468721616454936,0.0,0.12154565868484545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720937704540222,0.0,0.0828353841444862,0.0,0.1463674364133541
mentalhealth,SensitiveSalamander0,2020/01/11,"Depression? I'm just kinda interested in seeking advice for myself, wondering when any of y'all are/have been in a similar situation.

First of all, I am 17 and a junior in high school. By like all standards my life is going tremendous: my family is upper-middle class, I'm in a loving family situation, I (easily) have a 4.0 GPA at an honors high school and got 1580+ SAT recently, my social life is pretty dec., I just finished a pretty decent relationship that made me happy but I'm happy I'm done with, and I am super passionate about my extra-curriculars, etc. etc.. I think I look like a really happy, carefree dude to other people. Not trying to humblebrag or some shit, but just trying to get the point across I have nothing rational to be upset about.

Anyways, I am still active in life, and that's kinda my outlet. Whenever I'm doing anything (legit fucking anything) I'm super happy, playing sports, doing homework or even in class etc I'm fine. Sometimes I'll just fucking crash for like 7 hours and not be able to do anything after school, but usually I'm pretty good.

But anyways, when I'm not \*doing\* anything actively (which is pretty rare for me; I'm a busy guy) I'm super super depressed. I really really hate life and frankly want it to be over immediately. I really want to just fucking sleep for 50 years. This is a pretty constant feeling, I haven't had a day without hating life in my downtime for over a year. Blasting music into my head is pretty much the only thing that keeps me sane. 

Any of y'all experience this? What should I do?

TL;DR Life is going objective great, but I fucking hate life so much.",3.3084429923388927,5.401987305993693,5.42724988733664,76.31662066246058,74.99369085173502,7.8093285263632275,25.51701216764308,8.634040054169528,2.1561447498873365,1284,45,222,26,28,446,162,317,0.08800000000000001,0.621,0.29100000000000004,0.9974,0,0,0,0,0,0,56.0,0,2,0,6,14,30,8,1,13,0,25,16,3,1,2,38,57,16,0,3,16,0,1,3,0,1,7,0,1,1,10,8,0,1,3,2,0,2,5,11,0,1,6,2,26,19,33,47,8,30,0,2,1,6,6,15,5,6,16,144,36,8,0.07100126440757637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06938161384132986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656658906850528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337119636305509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672714316330209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04578994175483518,0.0,0.12230656999014727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265894460142636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375555344532391,0.04689566551233147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945286066508262,0.1338673462655025,0.0,0.03590037263376579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06039363923407174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625580993826881,0.03709523018383967,0.0,0.08070330957521205,0.05955249195290178,0.056786197235679674,0.07827914466583555,0.0,0.07030241456638907,0.0,0.30232866490004806,0.0,0.21029714749592707,0.07286778114745088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500334681730464,0.0,0.0,0.0699219433258841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310918611649373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35105204965542786,0.10406289413144336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05962317997698045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640814132022783,0.0671831131212019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438819769951432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812762811375997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05399966102147096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0492233368472979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671191445019534,0.0,0.0,0.4334028679069167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18194091228309925,0.0,0.07010518294612042,0.07622878649229936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21557121047119265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288177759879137,0.0,0.1596167920609583,0.0710525406715975,0.0723768476634591,0.0,0.0,0.07022206599672297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056701701471962684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047170085165049135,0.045494743326972086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641039577468842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819786176186581,0.0,0.0837567706538343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684426852028747,0.07699784253885304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914449728211706
mentalhealth,Lord_K16Chankbjorn,2020/01/11,"Delusional thoughts periodically? So I don’t know much about this sub but I’m really curious but I don’t really know anyone who I can talk to about it. Mental Health wise I haven’t self harmed or anything, sometimes I’ve been kinda shaky with various minor problems but nothing super bad. I’m a male, 16 and I have a friend I’ve known for like 2-3 years only and I get on rly well with him, also male 16, and he also helped me when I was having mental health problems.  Anyway, for like a year now, perhaps slightly longer, I’ve periodically had a crush on him (I’m not normally gay) but it wasn’t like ‘omg he’s cute’ or anything it was like a complete infatuation, not sexually much but just I had to know everything about him, be around him as much as possible knowing eventually we’d go separate ways and he’d die, and to try and savour every moment I had with him, I was completely obsessed with him just as a person, despite him being just a pretty regular guy. However, I only sometimes think that. It’s pretty much always when I’m tired and night or early morning and almost never during the day, even when I’m with him. Whenever I get tired it’s just like my brain completely flips in its opinions and actions. I’m certain I don’t like him, but I’ve always wondered if I just say I don’t like him because nothing could happen since he’s completely straight, but in the evening that mental barrier just kinda breaks cause I’m tired or it’s just me playing the same torturous trick on myself every day for over a year? I’m sorry if this isn’t the right, idk what to do.",3.649822916666668,4.966692503125003,5.2818749999999985,80.94229166666669,72.40625,8.083333333333334,27.083333333333336,8.59863814320734,1.9439895833333336,1251,44,247,22,24,425,155,320,0.14400000000000002,0.6829999999999999,0.172,0.8932,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,1,0,0,1,22,22,2,2,12,0,23,7,1,1,2,59,42,31,1,6,22,0,0,7,1,0,5,1,0,5,13,15,0,1,8,1,0,2,10,8,1,0,9,2,31,14,25,28,6,28,0,0,0,1,25,9,0,12,22,151,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725583734044058,0.0,0.0,0.13936800285498918,0.14501112330168642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060928718325345986,0.0,0.14341383423810392,0.07757104309409649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275635460225179,0.053118343976256685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727451121711836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951443935017572,0.0,0.0,0.36544895691578333,0.0,0.0,0.06957237718751945,0.0,0.0,0.11239323849045676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043519378527988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151072815579547,0.0,0.14683457089892776,0.0,0.07831376206910667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732238460316438,0.0,0.091051722127828,0.0,0.049522373104450235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628004037568762,0.07705559605702729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18524663851568834,0.0,0.0,0.058406575444361335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19155444337703734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979976118816968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26344297353996715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25622499505345125,0.0,0.06720597982263041,0.0,0.0,0.081772845266604,0.08537646233611954,0.16722198065627425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325443218968308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608529410793292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823468411542197,0.0,0.1773007711166406,0.0,0.1667580554212034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164530659861753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441513487259345,0.0,0.06929541063136772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090364367571206,0.0,0.0,0.07208122060479275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17236286198221415,0.0975435409858264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003799683430212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055834331087247474,0.0,0.06917761454060496,0.0,0.30045596433951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059160790503296874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691658644476713,0.0,0.0,0.07834727310434883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094497137887341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834149998604028
mentalhealth,Mannibal_Lecter,2020/01/11,"Delusions I'm not sure if this is the correct place to ask this question so feel free to point me in a different direction.

I have a friend who recently reached out to me. We haven't spoken in 6 years until today. I woke up to a string of messages out of nowhere claiming he was responsible for all these successful movies. He claims he gave the screenplays away for free to the studios and directors who made them. Huge movies like avengers endgame and ghost Rider. Really worrisome because he seemed serious, like he genuinely believed he was responsible for making these movies. I didn't know what to say so I just asked him how he'd been and avoided all his claims.

I'm just wondering what could cause him to say these things. Is is schizophrenia? In the future should I humor him or call him on it and tell him it's bullshit?",3.8602232142857176,6.048439718750004,3.985892857142858,86.84125000000002,73.6875,7.571428571428572,28.30357142857143,8.418075326091056,2.039357142857144,665,27,129,12,14,205,101,160,0.085,0.741,0.17300000000000001,0.9344,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,1,1,5,10,0,1,7,0,12,0,0,4,4,28,24,10,1,3,5,0,1,2,1,1,0,2,1,0,12,7,0,1,5,0,2,0,3,2,0,0,7,3,16,10,21,14,2,16,0,0,0,0,27,11,0,5,7,81,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3676507125804157,0.0,0.1847432212802742,0.0,0.0,0.11986568092702315,0.0,0.0,0.22153810977772345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20078432681395084,0.0,0.0,0.20199630527460705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569954885834036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20543968386031405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994235771878547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519182050497711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080643807356302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921299497847548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860589443253791,0.13125408636390906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20543968386031405,0.0,0.18588178769755426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22027401525187795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12596816557130774,0.0,0.1941514128284174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31274098394932365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17900734180102232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853243206033603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17186595083013376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13063425973896367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863851377246179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21324015265957755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662523598955247
mentalhealth,Ronk123,2020/01/11,"Feeling alone I live in the United states and i’m a senior in high school. I pretty much have everything I could ever want. I have a gf, some friends, and i’ve got into a couple colleges, but i still don’t know why i feel so alone and worthless.

Recently, this feeling has gotten a lot worse and I don’t know who I should talk to about it. Lately, it’s felt like i’m an annoyance to most of my friends as I am always disregarded or flamed for stating anything in a conversation. Some of my friends are somewhat nice when we are in the friend group, but when i’m alone with them, they treat me like i’m a stranger. My gf has also been talking to me less and it might be because she is busy. But recently, whenever i would text her, she will leave me on delivered for hours on end and I will see her activity in a group chat that I have with some other friends. I feel selfish for feeling like this since i might be asking for too much from her. I also feel this because a lot of people have it much worse than me, so it feels like I’m just weak if i can’t handle problems as small as these. 

I thought about talking to my parents, but they seem a bit too busy with my other siblings. My sister recently had a benign breast tumor taken out as well as some problems with school , so most of my parents focus has been on her. My parents are also very focused on my brother as he is struggling with focusing on his classes. This once again makes me feel selfish for worrying about my problems as they seem a lot more minuscule than theirs. My parents are already under so much stress whether it is with each other, or my siblings, so I rlly don’t want to worry them more. 

I thought about going to my gf for help, but I also feel like she is very busy and I hate to be the type of person to take away from someone’s time. I also don’t want to be a high maintenance boyfriend who tells her all of her problems, because I feel like that would stress her out.

It feels like I have no one to turn to now and I have no idea where to go from here. I hate to talk about things like this with anyone because I don’t want people to think that this is a cry for attention. I just want to fit in and be normal like everyone else. 

This past week, it has gotten so hard to cope with my feelings while also trying to stay positive at school so that i don’t need to have people worrying about me, but it kills me inside that I don’t feel like I could ever tell anyone this.

If someone could maybe give me some advice on what I can do from here, it would mean a lot.

Thank you.",5.438675238651861,4.696430137476458,5.884367816091956,85.48728813559323,67.77589453860641,8.680070134424312,29.79810377297227,7.6298220110432995,1.6350960581855962,1997,61,438,18,29,645,211,531,0.174,0.665,0.161,-0.9511,4,3,0,0,0,0,42.0,1,1,6,0,34,35,4,3,18,0,50,2,1,1,3,96,98,43,1,20,13,6,15,10,8,8,1,0,0,1,31,22,0,1,24,1,0,2,10,15,1,1,10,16,73,20,76,72,22,46,0,1,1,1,50,23,0,20,28,321,104,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05294631694670166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834956831135495,0.059791515907961834,0.2599773967101077,0.04508401445297657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577104859374029,0.0,0.04458741666386546,0.0,0.05065313687589811,0.0,0.05090605487325005,0.0,0.0,0.13211610988277267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059153039031397674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978047423815467,0.059951684917323764,0.05951671287248361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04526235953011922,0.0,0.04798943606649417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802198555885573,0.0,0.05177351004014183,0.04869555797654472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35615058854276904,0.2322470777343993,0.05202350538018925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20930555472930484,0.0,0.0,0.05197659976515677,0.06158609998880734,0.0,0.0433345353412232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04853669874169677,0.10698760865542112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036317253897885364,0.11449315054373968,0.0,0.0,0.05335865177953334,0.0,0.0,0.061165222149668685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994468770546814,0.0,0.05955435070850045,0.0,0.06111999495636194,0.057371232901760175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647073516083,0.0,0.04784396398962515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842554171628708,0.0,0.0,0.03616710630287619,0.0,0.054433403428352255,0.05902040930842375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11495771690272615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15932090059286236,0.04017548926450322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053087150478764125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05770238169223664,0.03671532905422397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24065213056044746,0.0,0.05172313666327637,0.11268955489496607,0.047309894870404455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055122878476823414,0.0,0.2073805763194821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604954553677755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645061422222624,0.04317627847648999,0.09865106282425157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044820158861521985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918169747370314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05775112312723475,0.043270055153480036,0.0,0.12413128427397226,0.056643104700406975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0407383468904864,0.17419872294712346,0.09471543760221586,0.04988378266036003,0.0,0.0,0.03599631287423123,0.034717830362196354,0.0,0.08602938871889439,0.03159413513242184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0367862254063256,0.05893478408301686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941214465114326,0.15979062319059453,0.0,0.043461773219094,0.0,0.04871639516424167,0.0,0.048891098665493536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507426862676128,0.11043278622515484,0.11546865508459557,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ApolloGay,2020/01/11,"A question or two Looking for some advice. 
Im not actually going to kill myself, but I seriously feel like I want to (if that makes any sense) and it is causing significant distress and breakdowns. 

I have never been to the doctor with regards to mental health before, but if I go is there anything they can to do that helps somewhat immediately and in the short term?

Basically I am currently in my school exam period and want to be able to focus on learning rather than irrationally wanting to die over the next couple of weeks. After that I have time for longer term solutions. 

My other question is: if I only feel like this during the most stressful points in the year, does that mean it is not a mental health issue and that im just bad at coping with high stress situation? Even with high stress I cant see how its normal to feel like this.",8.119512195121949,6.848962048780487,8.378170731707321,71.50798780487807,62.65853658536585,10.639024390243904,33.30487804878049,9.516144504307137,2.9208317073170735,672,21,124,10,8,222,106,164,0.188,0.705,0.107,-0.9655,1,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,1,0,5,10,1,4,7,0,12,3,0,3,1,36,24,12,2,8,10,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,11,8,0,0,7,0,0,2,4,7,0,1,1,5,12,3,23,22,5,22,0,0,2,0,4,10,0,9,13,88,23,4,0.11655028912787185,0.0,0.11373626960747235,0.0,0.0,0.113891593633401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925819328666557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591095722401226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973146231129438,0.0,0.0,0.09917571171340347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972925218904812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12896067809806155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12096079919716275,0.0,0.0,0.11929415958099085,0.10199394343433904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698036675700339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17679398438222405,0.24979064952240165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247643042767304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24777501441140115,0.0,0.0,0.07812120202775841,0.2462835590370131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25178862477626074,0.121648221133742,0.0,0.0,0.12894562655802658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708217522561278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787288892701307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779822302068164,0.0,0.0,0.1269574327483178,0.0,0.0,0.23491055704066915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989076807282713,0.0,0.1239525547216935,0.0,0.11419453737582905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864174683891864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017769560852116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611259952198908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795511492037505,0.09287549061811164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100740824541546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4005238872409652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796141086305922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385269705855525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20623314072445384,0.0,0.0934896117333133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505456494701895
mentalhealth,LittleStarDarling,2020/01/11,"Experiences with Journalling for Mental Health? So, in January I started a daily journal and a bullet journal, and I was wondering: 

• What experiences other people have/had with journalling? 

• Whether journalling positively or negatively affected your mental health?

• If there are any particular spreads you would recommend for mental health?",7.616323529411764,11.839588941176475,7.025661764705883,56.04672794117647,81.15686274509805,9.608823529411763,39.708333333333336,9.188382445141503,6.0695274509803925,280,17,29,9,8,87,38,51,0.031,0.836,0.133,0.7399,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,3,3,0,1,0,10,5,6,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,5,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,3,1,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270051457827353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817647672178365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6222676271419082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5899595456286445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352841017147719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381196630871178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116188098779004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13862041867049868,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Soboter,2020/01/11,Cutting doesn´t do anything anymore I have stopped feeling it when i cut myself. I don´t know what to do with my self-hatred now... any suggestions?,3.4800000000000004,6.391074777777781,3.653333333333337,84.90000000000002,79.0,5.0814814814814815,34.925925925925924,6.42735559955562,2.407948148148148,117,7,19,1,3,36,24,27,0.212,0.731,0.057999999999999996,-0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,14,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32171232595838695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4691707237063506,0.0,0.0,0.38930659221352093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392047289686959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599937724650093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4935282279731558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3955181572500833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ARomantikorpse,2020/01/11,"I'm not really sure I want to exist anymore. My mental state is at its all time low. And I can't do this anymore. The last few months have been nothing but hell. I'm stuck someplace where literally every thing is my fault, I'm pretty sure my fiance hates me, I work a shit job, I can't do anything without being questioned or told off. Any ideas I come up with are ridiculed and made fun of. I'm not sure how much more I can take.

Back story: a few months back, November I think, my fiance and I lost our apartment due to a meth head saying bullshit that never happened, and we moved in with her parents. I'm grateful that they allowed us to do that, especially considering my fiance is pregnant. But her mother truly despises me, and for good reason, so I don't blame her for that. I've tried to be respectful and do has I am asked here, but it really doesn't matter due to the hate they have for me. I'd rather not get into it, but I should. Six years ago, when my fiance and I lived together in the city, I had severe anger control issues. Like bad. To the point of abusive towards her. So I get the hate, and do deserve it. But it's gone too far. Since we've been here my fiance and I's relationship is beyond strained. Alot of it is hormones, but there's quite a bit that is her mom getting in her head to go against me. At this point I'm not even sure she loves me anymore...that alone makes me suicidal. I'm already diagnosed has bipolar, but who the hell knows? I've been misdiagnosed before a few times.

I'm not sure how to continue pushing through this hell. I've bitched and ranted about this situation before, but of course people just basically called me whiny and that I'm just ungrateful. You try living in a house where everyone fucking hates you. Try it and then tell me you want to continue living. Try and always be wrong, even when your right. Try and breathe and just be content when no matter what, your the blame. You try it. And then when you try to talk, be cut off and told that your issues aren't valid and your just being a baby. Try not to eat a bullet after two straight months of being completely broken down. 

I have nothing for support in the city I live in. I moved here to be with my family, but now my family doesn't want me. I can't stop thinking about just ending it all. Maybe they would be better off without me. I know I need help. And I know if I don't get it, I won't be able to avoid the one horrible option that keeps coming. I have appointments next week with my psychiatrist and my therapist. But I don't even think at this point that will help. I keep feeling like nothing will. 

I'm unhealthy. My brain is fried. I'm depressed and spiraling deeper into the depths. And not one person gives a damn about it. If I died, they'd all be happier. Everyone would. Because I'm awful. I'm a fucking monster. And monsters don't need to be saved. They can't be. Apparently we can't change. And everybody just knows what's best. And fuck it seems viable. Everybody knows everything. Except for the monster.

Sorry.",1.6043481564019435,3.8681401912479743,3.0489361324959496,90.37423888269858,81.44732576985413,5.99563411669368,21.79621657212318,7.231253607405505,0.7091005064829821,2386,75,498,33,64,778,269,617,0.213,0.657,0.13,-0.9956,4,2,1,0,0,0,83.0,4,9,5,6,33,40,17,2,22,1,57,12,5,7,9,110,114,48,2,11,30,3,1,2,0,6,2,1,0,1,30,35,1,5,13,0,0,7,24,25,0,4,10,2,75,15,55,84,11,64,3,3,0,4,43,29,9,7,29,328,105,2,0.0624979911849803,0.07404989980705416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055400698272478496,0.0,0.0,0.06472907045968439,0.06896808738362696,0.0,0.052003335275591284,0.0,0.0,0.042500777153223854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239624270886008,0.0,0.0,0.051430521571274916,0.0,0.05842718514929926,0.0,0.0,0.0961141949009665,0.05218321209662275,0.03809819534098232,0.0,0.1063623746077208,0.0,0.06558778592899595,0.05527439435773286,0.06823161953619714,0.0,0.0,0.06976842748909651,0.06381743669418379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611458773581126,0.10767297091105373,0.06552795468341008,0.0,0.07009681142601222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053829428228419934,0.06343414548037571,0.06486304768972552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395104762283889,0.0,0.0,0.055354669803316096,0.0,0.0,0.1238380012352595,0.0,0.052657253089602916,0.11943901773964265,0.056169164583325104,0.0,0.11783508782084895,0.0,0.031600862197648155,0.04464857739023903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333515731390364,0.13061048353877133,0.059953768023295675,0.03551904865719635,0.05242034980885367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05526676720209253,0.0,0.0,0.24681530918435265,0.12828193925336634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837821721803576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211429068654747,0.0,0.07055262476620998,0.0,0.1304633306184912,0.06201961265285145,0.11110217234889214,0.0,0.0,0.17173630745796542,0.05094420431152465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061066723195016666,0.0,0.22074748493046184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822394017227153,0.0,0.05640687712893332,0.05913711039743631,0.04171789442082935,0.0,0.06278763244627676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298327543005483,0.0,0.0,0.07319689192262993,0.14965590089470546,0.13285094772083375,0.04594321463199225,0.0926829371089841,0.04820230368079946,0.0,0.06646732264947786,0.0,0.0,0.17990552436639606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470051257533516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06939662307231638,0.0,0.0,0.043328237856697496,0.05457083524282708,0.0,0.0,0.1772424084174007,0.0,0.0,0.06358292546853407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001205346439256,0.06647430665502277,0.0,0.0,0.08007562701124969,0.06425834396389278,0.0,0.06709945331239903,0.0,0.05337294298875095,0.0,0.049700911075983366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056895823914414785,0.0,0.07060494069310146,0.06415328983111614,0.051698984144636334,0.07025036065509925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996138434568375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052251119105439135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836265852192913,0.07092197976201231,0.29451808529249723,0.0,0.04699071140013431,0.050233517932657186,0.05462599900614197,0.0,0.0,0.07256498479801188,0.04152088827484927,0.12013856757916992,0.0,0.0,0.07288616251098709,0.0,0.0,0.11943901773964265,0.0,0.33945626830972186,0.0,0.061051456074425164,0.0,0.0751773882208412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058880340405268,0.0,0.0501321187078769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049166651260927,0.0,0.045499281930148176,0.0,0.0,0.08879355956568448,0.06833174226175359,0.0,0.04024665724599712
mentalhealth,pinkguyfriedrice,2020/01/11,"I just had a conversation with a friend who is ignorant about mental health and it makes me sad and angry This is just rant and I'll keep it short. My friend thinks depression is caused by ""weak mindedness"" and he keeps giving condescending remarks about his sister despite me suggesting she has mental health issues because it is quite apparent to me. He goes on about a load about crappy examples of how he is ""strong minded"", which to me seem like very average achievements. I don't even know his sister that well but I feel so sorry for her and disappointed that someone I know for years is such an ignorant jerk.",5.918706896551722,7.249437422413795,5.933965517241383,78.34508620689657,67.01724137931035,9.593103448275864,28.29310344827586,9.827888789773867,2.6362103448275858,495,16,90,11,8,156,80,116,0.205,0.706,0.08900000000000001,-0.9289,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,11,12,1,0,4,0,9,3,0,3,0,22,18,8,0,0,3,2,1,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,8,6,0,4,5,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,1,1,13,5,12,17,0,3,0,3,0,0,15,2,0,1,2,59,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487944060605225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19359354883708596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623146332176131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447169024105804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528769904829723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911972514404448,0.0,0.0,0.1807816688191626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4006342934250027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19669638295088174,0.0,0.33501207328391125,0.0,0.0,0.20713811513583755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09206880978876396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579410471896788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37983339547626216,0.0,0.19028420721617675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20044338307514414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715608932551579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15967595027267134,0.0,0.0,0.21095814711757796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075332628560835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549378754831375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694422347063439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213578078778483
mentalhealth,roadtonowhere5,2020/01/11,"Listing all my symptoms. What does this sound like? Hello everyone, the last two years have been the absolute worst years of my life. My overall mental has declined. What does this sound like to you? 

•One major panic attack in 2017 triggered this decline in my mental health. I had a very bad drug experience smoking weed and had to be admitted to the hospital because I thought I was dying. 

•Constant fear that what I smoked was laced. Fear that the weed did permanent brain damage to me. 

•My overall mood is up and down. I tend to become very angry at my mother and father and last out at them.

•Complete lack of motivation. I am an artist and now I rarely feel like working on any projects. At my job I feel like making through each shift is a challenge. 

•Was consumes for months (if not a full year) that I am schizophrenic. My doctor told me that I was not...but I couldn’t rationalize this in my brain. 

•Constant scary existential thoughts about the nature of being a human. Almost as if I am scared to exist. 

•Feeling frequently disconnected from my life as if I am going through the motions 

• Constantly questioning my sexuality. Grew up in a very conservative house hold. I think I am gay but believe I will never be able to fully accept this aspect of my life. 

•Needing constant validation from others. I am convinced that I am ugly and overweight. When I look in the mirror I just think how disgusting I am. 

•Fear of being  narcissistic and or psychotic. Although everyone around me says that I am not...I can’t believe this. 

•Sometimes when I go out into public I feel like everyone is judging me and thinking that I am ugly, weird, and for some reason poor. 

•Think that most people hate me and do not enjoy my company 

What does this sound like to you? I am just in a very bad place and could use some advice.",3.130397515527953,5.705488573913044,4.0902277432712255,83.29434782608699,77.7536231884058,6.609523809523811,25.799171842650104,7.760100539840176,1.6664476190476192,1438,55,260,23,35,463,184,345,0.171,0.7609999999999999,0.068,-0.9901,1,0,2,0,0,0,40.0,0,2,1,3,8,23,3,4,14,0,32,12,2,6,2,53,49,22,1,6,9,2,3,6,0,1,9,4,0,1,20,16,1,2,13,1,1,4,5,12,0,1,10,8,46,10,39,32,9,36,0,1,1,1,12,19,0,9,19,186,66,6,0.08312962041313282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123330296164218,0.0,0.0,0.08324230679496279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056530992517079916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400298667068474,0.0,0.09457194420159408,0.0,0.0,0.13881952143680307,0.05067504502260498,0.0918101345837288,0.0,0.1873172304263445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560029799433314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715982539595551,0.35933434931160396,0.0,0.06637223758110948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627542151437416,0.0,0.0,0.08508668899646635,0.21824187307247647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640396777147453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23830174423910316,0.0,0.08131672008757124,0.0,0.28063180312487346,0.16813133538599434,0.17816345229967695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448895800727516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207328977949661,0.0,0.0883628991828585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09592042076027092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249332114917793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552347159868045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17615072799822626,0.2436776009672249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980794441713344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554896671378477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755021016209973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635326991092212,0.0,0.0,0.06163956020474245,0.06411468804114777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05633078220342496,0.0,0.0,0.09753469827750456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057631611799113386,0.0,0.08685276009393704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931241999700882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547109500342921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610801073117194,0.08322725211307981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221732020747836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640350537241352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21306441653512487,0.0,0.13199126587863974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943391474636771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120555993735203,0.0,0.0,0.07179730136200814,0.0,0.2743625715159009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06051935372976139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16059825010317685
mentalhealth,LoveableLlama,2020/01/11,"I don’t give a fuck anymore I felt okay for a while, off of the meds. I had hope, goals and focus. When I realized that it’ll be impossible for me to escape my mothers grasp and develop autonomy, I decided to take my antidepressant as it is easier to remain compliant this way. I want to break shit, scream my fucking lungs out, bleed all over her fucking beloved bullshit piece of shit environment she calls a home but that’ll just push me further back into her grip. From the outside, she is wonderful, perfect and popular. Hell, I can even convince myself that when I’m extremely medicated. I was never given a chance to make my own choices and grow as a human being. I’ve been on all the meds, ECT, the works. I now just have a fried brain and am dependant on others. There is no way out, suicide is not an option as I am too closely watched and penned in for it to work. 

Fuck everyone who thinks that environment is not a factor in recovery. I would go to the hospital, but it feels too good to be able to make my own friendships in person, knowing I won’t have that freedom at home.",4.834423963133641,5.4033019124424015,6.061451612903228,79.21217741935487,69.04608294930875,9.517972350230414,31.16820276497696,9.606745405546679,2.7770147465437787,853,34,171,18,14,287,134,217,0.139,0.698,0.163,0.599,0,0,0,0,0,1,25.0,0,0,0,4,11,14,7,0,13,1,21,10,4,3,4,35,39,14,1,3,6,1,3,0,0,4,2,1,2,2,12,10,0,0,8,0,0,3,6,8,0,0,5,5,24,6,29,27,5,25,1,0,1,4,10,13,7,4,6,125,36,4,0.14076038062783633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395964741402381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823604408304116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15713513703350754,0.14373208657504774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092970903861919,0.0,0.0,0.13450257584348865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117267782164736,0.0,0.13515203957811234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5205228148315171,0.0,0.1350301833230796,0.0799973681350439,0.11806312893960412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823882773392781,0.13980681862772293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773582239910835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879172941826988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127061014423903,0.14180127473943793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856308314239824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290653498324447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28897701586690305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15396901007260072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583428838662118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019356825125734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302411947000526,0.22345807657192768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15264862835505555,0.204950467090214,0.0,0.0,0.09999213578539712,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cosmamartin,2020/01/11,"Everything feels like it’s too much I can’t leave the house because I’m terrified of people. I’m alone and I can’t stand it but won’t change it because I can’t function around people and value myself so little that I feel I’d be of no value to anyone.

I haven’t worked for nearly 2 years now since I left a good job and told everyone I know that it was because I was moving to another city. In reality I quit because I couldn’t take another day of standing in the bathroom having panic attack after panic attack. Panic attacks triggered by the most mundane things, helping a new starter, taking a delivery etc. 

I’ve lost so many years of my life to social anxiety and now I don’t feel human. Missing out on so many things and being so far behind ‘normal’ people in all aspects of life has left me with no self confidence so I lay in bed and cry. Trying to get help leaves me with no answers but new questions and often a prescription for sertraline. If I’m required to leave the house and can’t find an excuse to escape it I’ll spend every second sweating and panicking, worrying that everyone around me is looking at me and judging any movement, sound or action I make even though I know deep down that they’re not. 

Not talking to anyone means everything stays in my head and it’s becoming too much. This all started around 6 years ago and the last 3 have been the worst. The knock-on effects have left me depressed and recently I began hearing voices, talking to myself, increasing suicidal thoughts. I genuinely hate myself and have done for a long time but I want to be happy and just live in some level of normality. 

Making this post is tough because I feel wrong for spilling this anonymously online but all I’ve tried has failed and I don’t know who I can trust for help. Experiences with doctors have been confusing, almost feels like they don’t believe me or don’t understand and think a prescription will fix this. So I’m asking here: what can I do? What small steps can I take to get better?",5.5042317380352666,6.047960360201515,6.148288161209072,79.26642216624687,67.56423173803526,8.971647355163729,30.4895717884131,8.954980946260402,2.4712191234256924,1601,58,300,26,25,523,207,397,0.212,0.68,0.109,-0.9934,1,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,7,18,21,4,4,14,0,33,5,2,4,3,66,66,31,1,5,10,0,5,2,0,2,3,3,1,2,19,24,0,1,16,0,1,5,16,15,0,1,9,9,34,6,41,51,10,48,0,4,1,0,15,22,0,9,19,195,53,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655830281949579,0.0,0.0740850528198027,0.07662590157459725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050312175717326095,0.1551589491926164,0.05659814100047045,0.0,0.0,0.10346373269594586,0.0,0.0,0.19758637359095607,0.06916576596475978,0.2525050452543623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22550212336095124,0.08171035777254954,0.0,0.08335549220408342,0.0,0.06543351034662401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826606896270344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126878782681547,0.04771405136865842,0.0,0.06372296774780327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572653968002223,0.0,0.07571209925679546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251256745785272,0.04886623803111805,0.0,0.062335353555643264,0.141391222714757,0.13298546839383146,0.07237129453487677,0.0,0.0,0.18704459520529976,0.10570945858649756,0.0,0.0,0.06762073280880661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730796985943034,0.0,0.0,0.0620549088135131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875815569112167,0.0,0.07304463610536223,0.07592971118864761,0.0,0.08338620467085385,0.0,0.14877128082342644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17073696566401228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734184609956967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198027222023845,0.06030745625804085,0.0,0.23501754359546834,0.2411539836212937,0.0,0.1045152518429486,0.07229043593232125,0.07415216877258614,0.06532990097415628,0.06547418687126294,0.06212856717346684,0.0,0.08076310825331108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877080727679884,0.15001787412671394,0.0,0.08059109601390084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863409417016838,0.10877462683800757,0.0,0.0,0.1429098897892262,0.0,0.0,0.14497871808990825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260415534547261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15387515682660227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085695143953485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287986649119791,0.07869190215175237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305102762982163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718224302807025,0.0,0.0,0.06120096028632022,0.0,0.0,0.07541814850531432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052366795873711666,0.07885791310825943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092732223834076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16688200221767344,0.1189322996149302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830437779019396,0.047406448598023336,0.07268965376318448,0.05873563744729968,0.04314111013069095,0.0,0.0,0.0706956113573785,0.0,0.10046159484316056,0.0,0.0,0.07702074723816155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04363812995053652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053861788438099946,0.07513511788102213,0.0,0.0,0.08089072374723869,0.0,0.14293128458066365
mentalhealth,ShrekBox,2020/01/11,Anxiety Im not quite sure if i have it or not. I overthink alot of things and think of all the different scenarios that might happen. When I get really stressed I get tunnel vision and if I don’t sit or lay down I might puke or faint. I have trouble falling asleep because my mind wanders a lot I also get stomach pain regularly. Any insight or tips would be greatly appreciated thank u,2.91,5.028847272727276,4.637662337662338,81.40506493506496,76.27272727272728,7.5168831168831165,29.181818181818183,8.418075326091056,2.3245896103896104,308,14,59,6,7,104,58,77,0.217,0.679,0.10300000000000001,-0.802,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,3,0,7,4,2,0,2,20,13,10,0,3,8,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,9,3,3,9,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,10,1,39,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013449864859145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446759353652247,0.0,0.1627516375992479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968920607762496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22227637878187512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33345614727852113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345554209455479,0.0,0.0,0.1881323536919924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298043476216719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808707415663184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4513840151920778,0.2148148322518566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263788717326331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262836855523404,0.0,0.0,0.1362918164536508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24370211507395584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005124721275124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195869774703818,0.0,0.0,0.141340317771181,0.13632032794202084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511300750838006,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Geolinki,2020/01/11,"Curious Right so i was planning on drinking last night and i had one drink and after that drink i had about 4 pulls on a spliff, i was all fine until 10 minutes later where i started feeling really zoned out and away from reality it got much intenser and then a tingling and fuzzy sensation was going throughout my body i then couldn’t stand up and my body completely dropped, as i was lying on the floor i had extremely loud ringing in my ears and i couldn’t hear anything or anyone after about 30 seconds on the floor i got up and i just couldn’t think straight, i had no recollection of memory of what happened earlier that morning my mind was completely blank, i also couldn’t stop my eyes from moving i couldn’t focus them on a fixed point and they’d just keep moving in random patterns, i felt as if i was away from reality and was a big shock to me, not sure if this is the mixture of drinking and smoking or if it’s to do with my mental health as i have suffered with some dissociative feelings and questioned if reality it real, anyone let me know?",4.41001572327044,5.54195493867925,5.395584905660378,81.55193081761006,70.36792452830188,8.106163522012578,29.69937106918239,8.447377352677275,2.163942389937107,845,33,164,13,15,278,121,212,0.086,0.875,0.038,-0.8577,0,0,4,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,1,7,4,0,0,7,0,21,10,4,0,2,44,33,26,0,9,9,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,7,15,4,2,7,4,0,4,7,2,0,2,14,8,27,2,30,12,3,35,0,1,1,0,4,19,0,9,10,123,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517153642290304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18391501025446536,0.0,0.10822464971973997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471230840218732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921643629315335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27577942924941845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5153338152737331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13299465522404444,0.0,0.12627386980970431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474232191046755,0.0,0.21036719590315864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629721688316545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979301698213015,0.14822560802237478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689550599732493,0.0,0.0,0.0722765437758291,0.10720129795348968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448176837431836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325349756014659,0.0,0.13279144520253938,0.0,0.0,0.2795567076273442,0.09667777340456274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341679005487995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911715285489029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432304774427855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732555165404992,0.0,0.0,0.14969149369871915,0.08425110634325443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231206456781097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308614283625746,0.0,0.0,0.10995142358830222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395019783237593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426873120512192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ashrillo,2020/01/11,"Lol Yes , I am losing my sanity , haha , I cannot figure out what is happening to me. I ams not able to think or say properly , a ND losing my mind. I feel like going on a killing spree , with whatever in my hand , I feel like killing eyeryo ne ive met , all of my relatives , all my class""not-mates"" and my teachers. 
I am losing my identity , I don't even feel like im growing up , but being forced to, I am still like a child , just 19 but going through premature balding , I am suffering from insomnia and extreme amount of sleep , anorexic behavior and at the same Tim weigh gain , I've bunked like 4 days of classes in a row , sleeping on my bed , I did not even take a dump or a shower , just staring at the mobile screen and laughing like a maniac , I can no longer seem to live the internet , I despise every fucking social media , no real person to talk to me , I AM DONE FOR REAL , I CANNOT TOLERANT TODAYS FUCKING STUDENTS SITTING ON THE ONLINE WORLD , I HAD ENOUGH OF THIS I WANT REAL WORLD CONTACT, I feel like a pile of bear shit while watching erotic stuff , my genitals feel limp , I am fucking tired of political bullshit , I am tired of living a broke life because of my parents , I am tired of being alone , and having no value of existence , and just being a dummy ragdoll , I feel like cannibalising anyone I despise I see the next moment , this world is garbage and trash , my country is garbage and trash , my society is garbage and trash , I have lost my only important thing- my emotions and my goals , I've lost my reasoning , and my trust. Help me internet , this despicable place.",4.584230235783637,5.479470252427183,5.9200924641701365,78.82621359223303,69.77669902912622,8.863060564031437,31.21914008321775,9.107695989026183,2.711053814147017,1224,51,232,23,21,413,166,309,0.212,0.625,0.163,-0.9705,2,1,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,0,7,6,28,10,0,15,3,26,14,5,1,2,40,46,16,2,1,9,1,8,8,0,0,5,1,2,2,6,13,1,0,10,0,0,3,8,17,0,0,6,13,45,11,29,37,5,23,0,7,4,3,9,13,4,3,14,151,51,3,0.08900794326082233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218538582702407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622364234657293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05425841606993642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05740275995980465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108602885366204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012195602678647,0.0,0.09196899871142926,0.0,0.11757781413973507,0.0,0.07499303107835746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27003054301277724,0.31793646225079736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468592278692215,0.0,0.0,0.1011705306879654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870943027229843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05966014816080899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961438525614369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19694820318834133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06286894260272491,0.3478782808988999,0.0,0.15719128920084166,0.0,0.0,0.2987313634761566,0.19432536888778068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987264938100148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466095743098499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769455170138979,0.0,0.0,0.09883278761122563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771830285893319,0.09299435633253153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039315772484592,0.0,0.09151498992414177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078268899825757,0.0,0.0,0.07092780688161356,0.08102948864009263,0.0,0.0,0.09136537467872016,0.0,0.0,0.17814444746592356,0.09073238911980452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710818584643402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189280006979004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692289615692469,0.07154121323208193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059132922476952926,0.057032696058307165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069046115427477,0.08436912278562629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052499191051523605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KalopsicMemory,2020/01/11,"I can't do anything new I have been in a deep state of depression over the last ten years, I've been in and out of the hospital and have had dozens and dozens of ECT treatments. Over the last year, with much love and support from family and friends I have been able to finally scratch and crawl my way out of hopefully the worst of it. My life used to revolve around watching movies and TV. I love film. I would consider myself a film buff. Now that I'm finally feeling better I'd like to catch up on all the wonderful media I've missed out on, but I can't. It is extraordinarily difficult to watch anything I've never seen before, and most of the time I find it difficult to try and watch something in the first place. The only things I can watch are movies or TV shows I've seen before, the same goes for books and video games. I guess I was just wondering if anyone else has gone through this and if it will ever pass.",5.3541779497098645,5.236810085106388,5.6371566731141245,85.08772727272729,67.82978723404256,9.389555125725336,28.793036750483562,9.095868883498916,1.9698872340425528,728,22,159,12,11,232,112,188,0.07,0.831,0.099,0.3071,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,4,12,0,0,11,0,17,3,0,1,3,34,31,15,0,4,5,0,2,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,7,16,0,0,4,8,0,3,3,5,0,4,8,8,13,7,27,21,5,31,0,2,6,2,4,14,0,8,13,103,20,1,0.15069632697771532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053703756869446,0.15440619545668388,0.2480204738869073,0.13415168048681747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564629498981935,0.0,0.0,0.13327865500467315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979452560841515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125887444259554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631345527888294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14206308544494425,0.0,0.07619659083793016,0.0,0.0,0.3301609204516351,0.1377337127634802,0.12818221874399033,0.0,0.0,0.11642760840458105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600899382008188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14967545526422835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24567523931534094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644127236421123,0.07362261339581617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720186373496231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077913967023516,0.0,0.11622629749908778,0.14554345164332802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146113473031198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15744558761350114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601339486385776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17100840602204204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011594352452696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787224012846541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023129140511691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015324198999306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196157300182635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3268474766648092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070503469961236,0.0,0.0,0.19408698760098328
mentalhealth,lilacsky1996,2020/01/11,"Curious if anyone has had a mental health evaluation ordered by the court?  trigger warning to victims of childhood sexual abuse &  suicide. This is going to be a sort of long post. 
Way back into my childhood, I became a victim of sexual abuse by someone I was supposed to trust dearly. My grandfather. It went on for 6 years, my family ran an at home daycare. News broke about this as he was doing the same to children in the daycare, one child told her mother, she then called the police, my grandfather saw the police pull up, the proceeded to go into the house, and take his life. Throughout the abuse he always told me if I told anyone, he would do it. He always said he’d rather be gone than have to deal with what the people in jail would do to him. And how if I told someone, the family would blame me for causing his death. Shortly after his passing, is when my mother asked me if it was true. Which I then told her, because at that point as a child I felt as though I couldn’t hurt anyone if he was already gone. My fathers side of the family (it was my paternal grandfather) then talked on the local news about it. Stating he was a kind man, would never do such a thing, etc. to this day, I am 21. That side of the family believes i was lying to get attention. Even though I wasn’t even the one to come forward in the beginning because of the manipulation. Even my father suspected I was doing it for the attention. It effected my mother the most, she had already struggled with depression and suicidal tendencies. The rest of the years growing up... I went to therapy rarely. Didn’t get the help I needed, watched my mother beaten, verbally abused, and cheated on by my step father. She tried to commit suicide more times than I could count, she overdosed twice on prescription pain killers. Held a knife to her throat while my step father held her down, and told my sibling and I to come watch in hopes my mom would calm down. 
She then was committed to the hospital 3 times. She had seen 4 different psychiatrists and was finally diagnosed with obvious depression, PTSD (from MY situation), BPD, Bipolar disorder, generalized anxiety, the list goes on. I hold a bit of hate in my heart for never being evaluated. 
Flash forward to a month ago. My life was good, I was managing my mental health with no prescriptions (I’ve never been to a psychiatrist). One day, I was at my wits end. I came home, and my step father immediately copped an attitude with me. To which I left the room and took my 2 yearold with me. I continued mumbling under my breath, and bitched. He went into my moms room, started slamming doors, and my mom busted in my room asking me why I was being such a bitch. One thing led to another, I pushed my step father away from me because he was screaming in my face, and was terrifying my daughter. He then proceeded to grab me, and throw me into the wall. I hit my daughter on the way down. Once I realized i had hit my child, I had tunnel vision. I went full force, I was punching him, he grabbed me again, slammed me as hard as he could on the tile floor in the hallway, I’m 140 pounds, and my tailbone shattered a square tile. He held me down, and choked me until I couldn’t breathe. My mother sat there and didn’t say a word the entire time. I ended up scratching at his eyes in order for him to get off of me. I got up, disoriented, and told him he was lucky my fiancé wasn’t there (he’s a truck driver) and I told him he’s lucky I didn’t call the police. To which he did, the police showed up, I was calm at that point. I ended up getting arrested, me, because the police deemed me being the aggressor. I’m now being ordered by the court to get a mental health evaluation. CPS, got involved. They have closed it, realizing I’m not a piece of shit mother. 
I struggle with BPD tendencies, obvious depression, and anxiety. I’m nervous about this evaluation. I really am. Can I bring up the fact that this is the shit I’ve been through? Plus mention my mothers diagnosed disorders? Can I tell them I believe I have BPD? What happens in a mental health eval? 
I’m so sorry for the long post. I’ve never written it all out. This isn’t even half of what I’ve been through and I’m literally in tears as I write this.
Thank you, everyone for adding and/or giving me advice/input.",3.5321738221354906,5.230290989336496,4.741583495957626,83.17449958182327,73.34834123222748,7.950487872874269,26.748257596877608,8.627809220192981,1.9508276275439085,3361,121,659,63,68,1108,346,844,0.151,0.789,0.059000000000000004,-0.9977,2,0,0,0,4,3,125.0,0,1,2,2,21,30,9,3,56,0,66,18,8,6,11,92,123,44,4,17,7,18,5,0,0,5,10,3,6,5,28,37,0,4,7,1,0,26,14,19,0,6,61,14,117,11,112,44,9,128,0,5,6,0,84,58,4,10,40,446,145,2,0.0,0.24474023959747124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04577582212941076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397224219633745,0.0,0.0859373798504681,0.05595201365324659,0.0,0.0,0.05414913473432401,0.07900905178062613,0.0,0.0,0.10832385043251112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965530225544148,0.0,0.048517562459906786,0.0397080400346128,0.0,0.12591727308583114,0.0,0.0,0.11636139073361547,0.0,0.0,0.056377601309804876,0.0,0.19511664884945887,0.0,0.105460606886217,0.05906250346917685,0.0,0.053048595179376,0.0,0.08896672638182454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246081637510314,0.0,0.0,0.06660716922166142,0.05323866310539989,0.13343259609073135,0.10482720438501568,0.0,0.053952900812066516,0.11836802921748472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721337083982038,0.0,0.057592348437519376,0.13643116408692346,0.0,0.0,0.04934431696574371,0.0,0.0,0.19472671604828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04958258262108936,0.0565691921353665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13489907278111934,0.04953787779937955,0.058696503987763424,0.043313255674317416,0.08260259139404035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04566515917665453,0.0,0.046259375602005035,0.05098389571044026,0.0,0.2195639945085499,0.0,0.06119375278635838,0.03461326238598092,0.0,0.10359843725709766,0.05129025915731242,0.0,0.05958572809353758,0.055281782131385855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377520494606602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05610710658877378,0.0,0.07294984251034027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139970552677704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081642508571864,0.0,0.0,0.1814407404359659,0.04121862547820362,0.0,0.0,0.03829047084086883,0.1593120771632039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05499500825214383,0.1399706400395521,0.0,0.05494869441131196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035800734849117895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763314921409967,0.0,0.09891385911874714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036449929772211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033081962622021115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491215490440296,0.04106627057107115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601561626108827,0.0,0.05804562242263798,0.0,0.0,0.08750895778066796,0.0,0.0,0.05780685055600271,0.03655111999824493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797086425446586,0.0,0.16945762387699273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03882691940465302,0.041506346553797833,0.04513571294441115,0.04754325486401448,0.05905494097990133,0.0,0.06861475958214873,0.0,0.10147224832072646,0.0,0.09033525158081933,0.0,0.0,0.3947545357259497,0.057374037730457274,0.035060229932559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197899623685476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19148351533378508,0.04659714721839543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341818405090346,0.0,0.0,0.06650904702807109
mentalhealth,nannasan,2020/01/11,"Every time I am talking to someone, I am afraid it will be the last time Does anyone have any experience with this?

Whenever I talk to a friend, I get this overwhelming fear that this will be the last time we ever talk, regardless of situation. I'm not sure if it's abandonment issues or the fact that after two weeks of not talking to someone (even though I meant to write to them), I found out they were no longer alive.",7.685714285714287,6.029689000000001,7.630952380952383,77.75571428571429,63.76190476190475,11.257142857142858,32.904761904761905,10.125756701596842,2.8763190476190483,332,10,69,6,4,107,57,84,0.126,0.8059999999999999,0.068,-0.6075,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,2,0,3,6,0,3,4,0,8,0,0,0,3,15,12,3,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,3,0,9,2,10,5,0,9,0,2,0,0,9,1,0,2,8,47,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890799930343507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226330187409915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301756514913376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549066433564463,0.15816716058580516,0.1473236263686618,0.0,0.0,0.1710426098145925,0.0,0.19676148583694847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917204549859236,0.13509322463782766,0.0,0.09135498410804636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18250411716448625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850617714094825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19654534329401013,0.0,0.0,0.2963096514509003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479960427336726,0.0,0.0,0.562170154565506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17179502130064195,0.0,0.30587962179519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17080879415920944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025884550075285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MeowGoldCat,2020/01/11,"I’m feel like I’m going crazy and don’t know what else I can do but follow doctors orders. My first post/vent To give you some background..

Current diagnoses (all w/same Doctor)

Type 2 Insulin Resistant Diabetes
Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome
General Anxiety Disorder
Social Anxiety Disorder
Depression
Binge Eating Disorder
Post Traumatic Stress Disorder
Chemical Imbalance
Hormonal Imbalance

Daily Medications

As Needed
1/8 - 1/2x Trazodone (5-25mg) 
1x Ibuprofen (400mg)

6:30 AM Pills:
1x Glumetza 1000mg
2x Spironolactone 25mg 
1x Vyvanse 50mg
1x Prestiq 100mg
1x Prestiq 50mg
1x Oral Contraceptive 10mg
1/3x Trazodone 50mg (15mg)

11:30 AM: (Monday-Friday)
1/8 - 1/2x Trazodone (5-25mg) As needed 
I find I take this during the work week

6:30 PM Pills:
1x Cetirizine 20mg
1x Dexlansoprazole 60mg
1x Glumetza 1000mg
1x Invokana 100mg

History of Self Destructive Behaviour
-self harm
-emotional eating
-panic attacks 
-anxiety attacks
-PTSD episodes
-fits of rage & emotional outbursts

Prescribed Trazodone as needed to prevent anxiety attacks, panic attacks, PTSD episodes, fits of rage & emotional outbursts.

OKAY! So here goes my first post on reddit ever. I apologize that’s it’s long but after what happened this morning I feel jumbled & confused.

I work in the office of a Canadian high school. My title is Secondary Administrative Office Assistant, I work 8-4pm Monday - Friday each week. 

I worked my ass off to get here as I needed Insurance Benefits beyond basic Canadian coverage. I’m 25, I rent a garden home with my partner of almost 2 years, we have a dog, our own cars, no debt.. overall doing well.

On paper I see my Accomplishments but in reality I’m disqualifying the positive. I believe I’m a failure, a waste of space, that I’m not good enough, stupid, fat, ugly,  my partner deserves better, that my friends & family deserve better, that I’m causing problems to everyone in my life so I should just give up and hermit in my basement where I can’t hurt people.

I’ve had some awful things go down in my life, but I still see it all as a crutch. That I should be better than this, that I’m not doing enough, trying hard enough, that I don’t want to be another “snowflake” as boomers would call it. 

My work environment has been terrible. I’m treated as a student by some of my coworkers and have one coworker in particular who not only has a position of power and extremely well liked, but has been isolating me with her power.

Having worked at a few schools where I felt safe, comfortable, respected, etc. I know this isn’t right.. but after doing everything in my power (EXCEPT going to HR) I feel like I should give up & move schools. 

If I got HR involved I doubt I would be believed, I’d be blamed for HR Reps crawling around the school, and not to mention based on my location they would be close enough to drop in and out at random... my Principal doesn’t want that and she retires at the end of the year anyway so why would she care? 

The students at the school see me as an Authority figure to a certain degree, but it’s very obvious there is an unhealthy dynamic in the office. I’m portrayed as “useless” as this coworker will “correct” me while I’m speaking to students, staff & parents alike. 

I’ve been getting help from a Psychologist fairly regularly. We have been practicing cognitive behavioural therapy since we met in September 2019. After speaking about many incidents he is assuring me that this is NOT in my head but this woman is attempting to make me question my sanity using gaslighting techniques in hopes of me quitting.

Outside of my work life I have family who I knows loves & cares about me but also thinks I’m crazy. My relationship with my mother is particularly fucked up but that’s a story for another time. I have 2 amazing best friends who have been in my life since I was 4.. Although our relationships have been rocky growing up they have come to be a huge support. My partner is very understanding as well and loves me to pieces (I think). 

I have trust issues, so I’m scared to rely on them. During my happy times I know I can lean on them.. but during an episode I feel I can’t, shouldn’t, and need to deal with it myself.

Recently I have had 2 incidents I’ve never experienced before. 

The first was I had a nightmare that I don’t quite remember something about sexual assault and murder. I was running and swimming for my life.. but I woke up screaming in my sleep. My Partner had put his arm around me while I was asleep. This is something he does often as it’s normally a safe comfort for me. He does it in his sleep too. But for whatever reason I was terrified for my life and woke up screaming in fear this time. I scared him, I felt awful but I know it’s out of my control.

The second incident happened this morning.. this is what sparked this long piece of writing.

I had a nightmare full of my own personal insecurities and people I know. In the dream it was the morning after a party in some house I’d never seen. It was a total mess, covered garbage, my personal items & sleeping family/friends laying around. I didn’t have my morning pills with me, I couldn’t find my phone in the mess, the lights didn’t work, my Trazodone was missing, my bong broken, my car keys missing & feeling the emotional build up taking over. 

My brother and childhood best friend telling me to “calm down”. The scariest part was when I was screaming at my childhood best friend to “SHUT UP! LEAVE ME ALONE!” I was a monster.

Turns out in real life my body was a rock, unable to move. I screamed those words out loud in my sleep. The anxiety, anger, fear, & irrational sadness coursing through my veins when I finally realized where I was.. safely in my bed with my partner. My partner who I didn’t know had just been yelled at by me.

Groggy, angry, and unhinging my jaw I went to bathroom. I came back and the emotions hadn’t died down. I was a mess, I couldn’t even be touched I was so jumpy. When my partner told me I screamed at him I realized what I had done. I went from this anger to guilt, shame, sadness that I hurt him. Suddenly my thoughts were changing to I’m crazy, useless, a failure and all those awful feelings I get when I snowball out of control.

I took my morning pills, and needed space. I apologized to my partner over and over but he insisted he’s okay and is here for me. He held me before I walked to another room to work through what just happened. 

I feel trapped, crazy, & a sorry excuse for a girlfriend. As the meds have finally kicked in I’m now cuddling my dog and getting back on track for the day.

I needed to vent, and as some who has never posted on reddit before I’m extremely nervous from the reactions I’ll get.

Please be nice? I’m sick of feeling so broken.",3.5189991741712237,5.805154665893272,4.617581304809472,81.47356531912384,75.04021655065739,7.6622465164444815,29.519112037437573,8.543581382742746,2.4977185024971487,5345,240,970,106,118,1746,520,1293,0.214,0.653,0.133,-0.9992,7,2,2,0,0,0,202.0,5,1,4,27,40,87,13,13,49,5,96,37,12,6,12,155,187,66,2,23,25,3,12,3,13,9,20,9,5,13,48,43,3,7,29,4,2,18,23,46,3,5,49,27,157,41,147,119,26,138,0,9,4,5,74,75,2,13,43,611,205,23,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036977102472694194,0.03824528304620582,0.0,0.029530545348369536,0.0,0.4401148280962903,0.0,0.0,0.11616368239230088,0.14124544559810198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861869979699746,0.0,0.1680393831659588,0.0,0.056789238013778484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426658903295546,0.0832082710230148,0.11625796969187477,0.0979769140390682,0.0,0.041017623504301534,0.0,0.0,0.037706642661778166,0.04223470315176698,0.07529916892024667,0.03793424826952105,0.03906391832112273,0.031809380388707766,0.0,0.0,0.08283364412884922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023814889774562982,0.038070162969419945,0.031805210613886206,0.03748017438628602,0.038324443723908766,0.0,0.1692863757212431,0.07559279263690434,0.06463021361089925,0.03778918885906486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557117381934936,0.030847808561653117,0.20768978255237155,0.03270640223198732,0.15262203897675208,0.041183417518716674,0.024389965618661632,0.03340262722428982,0.0,0.035285374931025265,0.033187647879111264,0.0,0.06962306510008953,0.08310638616975732,0.14937139194741866,0.05276137808787694,0.07091151019673685,0.08090354783621141,0.06750130211641188,0.09423037940153747,0.0,0.0,0.14264872070762766,0.034138458996604906,0.09646428714848702,0.10627136206902453,0.06295947368528246,0.03097265419668603,0.02953393203959475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979633944848294,0.039309527127347546,0.03307938000894909,0.0,0.037897802653576826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024751420548047763,0.0390154515391932,0.03704083798974004,0.03667688876779132,0.0,0.042608853169012736,0.07906233298215044,0.0,0.0,0.038542242080879516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205897130846876,0.0,0.0,0.03910040987416573,0.0,0.0,0.18257865258794792,0.054122068261872165,0.0,0.0,0.06535854737510237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665620149426528,0.0,0.0246490899511695,0.037438228719440726,0.0,0.0,0.041017623504301534,0.03720011392719072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849521184928124,0.0,0.1916665569796946,0.08544124307638014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03618066473010216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02502272205206485,0.02808468248279222,0.0,0.0866518642193332,0.04100311456665615,0.039988392308435636,0.0,0.0512011283015358,0.06448654445701309,0.0,0.04053480752907036,0.0,0.0,0.14146360997569846,0.0,0.0,0.035334195919744994,0.08633148136278525,0.03712188055299793,0.04136674267645343,0.0785529177313023,0.0,0.042031062712254534,0.0,0.0379671534833827,0.03646100301735228,0.07929165569515538,0.04183114462561496,0.031535495521832935,0.0,0.0,0.07394083005139243,0.18686070998690696,0.08827822411430608,0.0,0.07704592494421446,0.0,0.0,0.06109286809685986,0.0,0.1478148571017188,0.03764247306895965,0.0,0.05685648821290059,0.0,0.041336804740176,0.0,0.0,0.029489986639748837,0.0,0.04229980643461112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04190437420053547,0.0,0.0,0.055529085935508725,0.0,0.03227586583331022,0.0,0.04222929533003781,0.0,0.02453268852965452,0.04732272006174666,0.0,0.029315949736453174,0.06459737245386472,0.0,0.0,0.035285374931025265,0.04102730683315401,0.02507104028204787,0.04016602218462553,0.0,0.03844235719283602,0.0,0.031893111471131566,0.0,0.0609373605335338,0.043561056960370326,0.0,0.059241297799353276,0.0,0.09960554735378016,0.06846348320470158,0.033320915384414264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419499636119921,0.0,0.0,0.1049276559713568,0.0,0.0,0.04755961385218678
mentalhealth,janelanee,2020/01/11,"Feeling the urge to do something drastic about my appearance I want to change my hair or getting a tattoo or a piercing. Until a year ago I used to wear my hair shorter so everytime I felt this kind of urges I would just cut my hair. Now I'm not sure if I want to cut them since they are kinda long right now. The point is that I feel really shitty about myself and changing something about myself will give me the illusion of doing something good, but I know I will regret my decision later. Maybe I should just calm down.",5.890857142857144,5.691906800000003,6.1816666666666675,81.91250000000002,66.71428571428571,8.904761904761905,29.880952380952376,8.344100000000001,2.0245238095238096,414,13,82,5,6,133,71,105,0.106,0.81,0.084,-0.5069,0,0,3,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,0,8,7,2,0,6,0,8,4,4,1,1,22,19,7,0,6,7,0,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,6,19,4,11,14,0,11,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,5,7,57,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17990105068767118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4293838948005935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20523309233513307,0.0,0.19486179153975716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603189107781684,0.19468609956914296,0.0,0.1702230531760794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21133898684315466,0.1115348474524804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17960248764430647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038884237834204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185134541011029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001360888039767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17331638086481296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16788058376740092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.468717580111616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19127597536784996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528180747525146,0.0,0.0,0.2394078359666293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441683512868322,0.0,0.0,0.1306917809882243
mentalhealth,AspiringSeller1,2020/01/11,"Need help on getting over childhood trauma and bad thoughts [19M] Hey, I've been struggling to get over certain thoughts of my childhood and need help on how to cope or get rid of them. I didn't realise that I had a pretty rough childhood until I was about 16 when I had random flashbacks to certain events which have messed me up. For some reason, every year I start to remember my childhood more and more as if they were dreams that I've had before, but I know they actually happened. When I'm alone and think about these thoughts, I start crying to myself for about an hour. I wouldn't say that these thoughts and events are currently damaging my life but I don't like the feeling of having them and crying all the time over them. I don't really have anyone to speak to about it and thought reddit might be the best place to seek advice and help.",6.826758711374098,6.177738053254441,6.116765285996058,84.65366206443132,64.91715976331359,8.694543063773834,31.20381328073636,7.3871296695380915,1.778608941485865,677,21,138,5,9,206,99,169,0.152,0.736,0.11199999999999999,-0.7975,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,5,1,7,9,0,1,5,0,16,1,0,2,3,32,33,17,0,4,4,0,2,1,0,2,1,2,0,0,7,8,0,0,10,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,12,4,20,4,25,18,5,22,0,1,0,0,11,7,0,5,16,93,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.13810659457114952,0.0,0.0,0.1382951999505076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465757428392813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895657450809453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816627401696113,0.0,0.0,0.12042613896322438,0.0,0.14852026107363964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31091400428787785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923971613792615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155857203089251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221820680932112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12514883033918728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28458080820903764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937221401761296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777765587968624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999622866557787,0.06914127030949163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15013414871633246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209875875843714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786201453751247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14398035482758392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066362632076927,0.1455098062314358,0.0,0.0,0.16031862255821902,0.0,0.0,0.11254522750004042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003422301747356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479511690727397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068259264607546,0.0,0.5617695526619915,0.08252353491934107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091136542526193
mentalhealth,Mango_Parfait,2020/01/11,"Just want to sleep my life away and my two beautiful kids are downstairs what’s wrong with me?! I can’t seem to get up. I try but it’s like ten minutes and I have to go back to my sanctity again. I’ve started scratching again, sleeping a lot. Just laying here and not wanting to move away from the room.  Thoughts are overwhelming me right now and my mind is just kind of shutting down and I feel like a bloody zombie in my own body.  I don’t want to go back to that person I was a year  ago.  In and out of hospital and on the valium but right now I just want to close my eyes and feel better when I open them.  Depression is a demon.",0.486984126984126,2.4725668888888923,2.0684920634920623,97.4075,83.81481481481481,5.634920634920635,19.272486772486765,6.868970318607317,0.01224867724867762,490,13,117,6,14,159,83,135,0.08,0.794,0.126,0.4926,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,1,12,7,0,1,6,0,8,5,4,0,0,29,20,11,0,4,7,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,1,2,3,12,0,0,4,0,0,3,3,3,0,2,2,4,17,4,20,18,2,27,1,2,1,0,3,14,0,2,12,81,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14736278789344526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3123781478210781,0.2556584331677365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14702682647817156,0.0,0.18465648992912292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318329663347765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168113085159267,0.11876274207486655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868541624138053,0.0,0.18895740294477775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17311462146962164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742107152461848,0.16243410025763888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413323181364392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16785621571144638,0.0,0.0,0.17668808012257356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14515539821366774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839381423756333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15133973926259722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33272250242527884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766637261788412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197693856408665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11286685823885205,0.0,0.1623934905627501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39221345308125977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18175864845210146,0.0,0.10705387838240203
mentalhealth,Georgia_sh,2020/01/11,"I think sometimes there’s no way of stopping someone from killing themselves. Sometimes we know that’s how someone will go and we can’t prevent it. I think some people you can’t stop, no matter what you do. Grohl (Nirvana) stated something similar about Cobains death, saying he’d already emotionally prepared himself for the outcome even though he was being helped. I found it really interesting when I read this and genuinely appreciated it. 

I think some people are just going through a hard time and might attempt suicide and later regret it but I think some people are just destined to die that way. I suppose I am talking about myself but obviously I can’t speak for myself as if I am someone watching on. I don’t want to die yet, I’m excited for my 20s I know what job I want and what wacky life style I’m going for. I know know I have this in mind I’ll do anything to get there. But in my head it stops at around 30-50. I don’t feel I need to live longer than that and I don’t feel my mind could be changed but then again could just be psycho xoxo 

Not that I planned the whole drug concoction thing yolo",2.837152466367716,4.880462973094172,3.627558295964125,88.91416255605381,76.21973094170403,6.0743497757847535,26.39663677130045,6.961326702584282,1.1229122869955157,885,34,179,9,20,281,129,223,0.135,0.765,0.1,-0.8340000000000001,1,0,2,0,0,2,16.0,2,2,0,2,14,4,1,0,3,0,22,3,1,1,1,48,42,16,5,7,9,0,3,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,15,9,0,4,11,1,0,3,9,2,0,0,2,6,30,2,20,32,4,20,0,1,1,0,11,5,0,5,9,119,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790493668871164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538060072408222,0.10318073885152143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261297187366628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850827060081473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24058385038413496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344139347664921,0.0,0.0,0.13037842879561856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655469028521908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721091397580027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12708473136957074,0.0,0.0,0.06055599865697633,0.0,0.19761581807271453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382883399698398,0.0,0.11895279353797344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768921710677593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115018625726086,0.0,0.12823259904623904,0.0,0.2547951943092903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818676969753992,0.0,0.0,0.10234694826018174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229577414039446,0.23406364164239105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08594268489068424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410634713879269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11593716957020707,0.0,0.07425222586072648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217294731090499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946198343281649,0.08922995042095222,0.22926760735077906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29070732571955205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126782137098892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316069467156343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700266583461081,0.2970710360501061,0.11387686376096255,0.0,0.06758560629349941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367284922101883,0.18400126419230867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940469072301264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aka_allen_collins,2020/01/11,"How much Wellbutrin to take to counter Paxil induced sexual side effects? Long time reader first time poster here. Long story short I started taking 10 mg of Paxil in July. It immediately became impossible to ejaculate, my libido was non-existent, and maintaining an erection difficult. I called my doctor and she suggested taking 5 mg in the morning and 5 mg in the evening and assured me that the side effects would go away. My libido improved slightly, erections slightly, but it still takes forever to ejaculate.

I went back to the doctor this past week and told her about what was happening and her response was ""These problems started when you started taking Paxil?"" I responded, ""Yes"". To which, her response was ""Really? Really though?"" While I'm not going to act like I've never had a hard time getting it up due to stress or anxiety from time to time, I never had difficulties ejaculating or wanting sex. Anyway I immediately went home and made an appt with a new doctor.

Before I left she said she was thinking about prescribing me Wellbutrin to deal with moderate depression and alleviate the sexual side effects and would call me to let me know. Instead I got a text from my pharmacy saying my prescription was ready to pick up.

It's 75 mg. Does anybody have any experience taking Wellbutrin to help with sexual side effects? How much do you take?",5.630469387755103,7.919245546938777,6.333622448979592,71.47227040816328,69.04081632653062,9.308163265306124,32.65816326530612,9.766711354998122,3.6836081632653066,1089,50,170,27,20,356,140,245,0.064,0.862,0.07400000000000001,-0.3472,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,2,0,5,12,6,0,1,10,1,13,4,0,9,3,34,37,17,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,2,3,2,1,0,9,12,0,0,7,0,0,5,3,4,0,1,14,3,25,2,27,20,2,38,0,1,0,1,17,12,0,2,22,113,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960648507882869,0.0,0.07830306681970826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616806807847364,0.0787064581092052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709853721486033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20903652839138007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552589863016903,0.0881602065598741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3143011515099471,0.08957357728450302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760604207383067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012509618904514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706508097164681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053477473134220514,0.0,0.11634404337868864,0.0,0.0818644963790672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051423678062667,0.0,0.09169205039592686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686079515289705,0.0,0.1026727339733628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0562529041738205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121152367401392,0.10466729085648886,0.0,0.05000661448568902,0.0,0.0,0.18116600789075216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685296759736912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504888097563936,0.0,0.15788854494714724,0.09885733392965954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771164039820222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794212805972537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114543568560627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736524740891518,0.08139864625868873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217347105962324,0.0,0.0817426850326559,0.0,0.1172499600140944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.538719743426673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558643528990167,0.10056554358689593,0.0,0.2984268714065898,0.0,0.0,0.09780680216919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037299715154198,0.0,0.08210486505292545,0.0,0.0,0.1897725154034899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454234014762264,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tnblast32,2020/01/11,I’m on the verge of self harming after 15 months of being clean I don’t know who else to go to. I have so much anger and sadness and I don’t know how to get through it.,-1.1225000000000025,0.3499837499999998,1.2900000000000027,103.625,86.5,4.0,17.5,3.1291,-1.17325,130,3,36,0,4,44,30,40,0.243,0.695,0.063,-0.8307,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,5,9,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,8,8,1,5,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,23,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3825813879400808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392743120806045,0.0,0.2602791354243883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5033848519710263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3655532263074837,0.0,0.33666611677701225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4777703550865338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,metheus69,2020/01/11,"I can't find motivation Hello, I'm 17 and i can't find motivation to learn/exercise/live life. I got this trouble when i went on High School it all started on my first day in school.
I have a feeling that I chose a school wrong, I am an electrician but at our school are all stupid teachers who know nothing to teach, the first year in high school was an interesting new school, friends, even had a girlfriend but the relationship lasted about 3 months  It hurt but I got through it I enjoyed life as much as I could, but I still had the feeling of hopelessness and emptiness and I can't enjoy the little things school totally destroyed my mental health i can't do anything with my life im just diving deeper to the void i can't get out alone.
If anyone could help me with this or had this similiar problem please.",3.1158457493426823,5.033070404907979,3.863597721297108,88.09970858895706,75.01226993865029,6.865731814198071,25.753286590709905,7.7094869923839395,1.2819924627519712,648,23,134,9,14,206,98,163,0.21,0.649,0.141,-0.9368,0,1,0,0,0,1,12.0,1,0,0,4,5,11,2,0,10,0,15,4,0,2,3,26,24,12,0,4,7,0,2,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,7,0,2,7,2,19,4,16,15,4,20,0,2,0,0,7,9,0,2,10,88,28,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075685307919825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262192997182883,0.0,0.08546864034967297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658488950024047,0.0,0.0,0.06698166414215853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859912017115208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050303455378088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898538935229165,0.17668799323476414,0.0,0.0,0.08024264475876397,0.0,0.054263013977029984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16613403928381376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039924012488747,0.0,0.0,0.06961574686612547,0.2194694072566504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118520144826252,0.0,0.11218755415441332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057079213854614036,0.08466046509304385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200799962233745,0.0,0.1040958694905658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466732110261794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290074958731558,0.0,0.07634968434935588,0.0,0.0,0.10030946823709204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996572987480572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140080382349388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938081873288952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150769752294663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7357891642861134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351325307324351,0.0,0.08294341898530355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900054206224679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628006011007842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11355554883383215,0.0,0.06688299026226299
mentalhealth,fuffles0,2020/01/11,"Local therapy options are crap, but I need to talk to someone I have been diagnosed with ADHD, Dissociative Identity Disorder, an adjustment disorder, Generalized Anxiety Disorder, and Major Depressive Disorder (in remission). I suspect that I'm also autistic and, while I've never been formerly diagnosed, I seem to meet the criteria for an Avoidant Restrictive Food Intake Disorder. I've spent a lot of time in therapy over the past 10 years, but resources are limited in my area and most practitioners have only heard of DID. My last therapist specialized in trauma disorders and had treated patients with DID before me, but I've yet to find anyone else whose understanding of DID is greater than mine. My biggest issue with this is that I can't trust my therapist to help me with DID-related issues if I also have to teach them about my disorder.

I don't have a \*lot\* going on in my life, at least not as much as I used to have, but I need someone to talk to. I work out my problems by talking about them, but my support network isn't big enough for the issues I need to discuss, which means I either over-burden my loved ones, stay quiet and let my mental health suffer. I tried journaling but I wind up uncovering memories that aren't ""mine"" and throwing myself into a flashback/anxiety attack often enough that I need a spotter if I'm gonna journal. I can't do research and work on stuff myself because I wind up triggering myself super hard and mess myself up for days, and I've tried online therapy too, but I was told my issues are too serious for the web-based platform and that I should find someone local.

On top of all of this, I'm going to lose my mom's health insurance when I turn 26 later this year and I can't afford to pay full-price for therapy. I have medicaid, but I'm worried that I won't be able to find a therapist who is experienced and trained enough to be helpful. I'm trying really, really hard to handle everything and I'm doing okay, for the most part, but I can't do it alone. I have a decent support network, but I can't rely on them for the really deep stuff.

I'm really scared. I've been trying to prepare for some big changes in my life and I don't feel ready. I'm scared that I'm going to screw everything up and accidentally hurt my loved ones. I can be so destructive without meaning to be or realizing that I am and I don't want to do that. I \*hate\* hurting the people I love and I'm not always in control of myself or my life and I'm really afraid that I'm going to keep hurting people and leave a legacy of pain wherever I go. I don't want to be this chaotic, destructive, thoughtless person. I can't keep my promises and I hate that, but I can't change it yet, either.

Anyway. If anyone has some advice on where I could get some help, that would be great. Thanks :)",5.5800336735767635,5.855904783542041,6.843883510470381,75.27886956750501,67.35420393559929,10.297400820793436,32.00468273176892,10.194018383442646,3.2356641692097234,2230,87,420,52,34,759,245,559,0.218,0.6779999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.9967,1,2,0,0,0,0,68.0,0,0,3,7,13,35,7,4,16,1,52,14,1,3,2,88,97,43,0,13,21,1,3,0,0,4,8,2,0,1,23,26,1,6,11,0,2,6,18,22,0,2,11,6,66,13,67,74,18,50,0,6,0,4,20,30,2,15,13,294,89,5,0.0570208813113464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06852801849965666,0.055720145282567406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059056436440511575,0.0,0.09119915636721344,0.047445941098603936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724163626032909,0.0,0.0,0.07974065202884137,0.05842463131947536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486948429335604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03475939999871098,0.0,0.04852057020960173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064106345671755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395376697462624,0.045526533895769314,0.0,0.0,0.03677375122600365,0.0,0.04911200151994679,0.1157499885017888,0.0,0.0,0.4574560902820001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04763362957595022,0.0,0.0,0.17675343911095767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249338278997268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028831470876800738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15634815749461908,0.0,0.06894987601973182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02979105703509257,0.0,0.16203140447981818,0.0,0.0,0.062865722947154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215901922492564,0.1125926304508684,0.0,0.12122106083468305,0.0,0.0,0.11465968438320932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831260983331436,0.0,0.0,0.2380599423959638,0.0,0.1013655585215259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04647962874439617,0.0,0.0603768801434116,0.0,0.05830771442375729,0.12082660433401098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637917808108266,0.0,0.0969542284097893,0.1543907148819965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422491198443343,0.0,0.0,0.057463636907422434,0.0,0.0,0.06678216703519872,0.0,0.0,0.04191690867053216,0.16912104393359892,0.043978018893139695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727764977715118,0.043366949696598205,0.0606742379863259,0.0,0.0,0.061748057815868486,0.05443288325888712,0.07906219900553474,0.04978843416314618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05456128257672863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18264518335580612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141756991316588,0.0,0.0,0.051909668791319134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14494082308604994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060776672608224176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055053395032393,0.0,0.12941324076820213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749367345639465,0.0,0.0524971665144771,0.2608333887944263,0.1986169142595489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033249334442426774,0.0,0.0,0.054485895669177,0.0,0.1548537418458093,0.06202234490848775,0.0,0.059360748394497474,0.0,0.04924773358872782,0.0,0.0,0.06726478631504937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0549660947892432,0.0,0.08302376142015787,0.0579074728311182,0.0,0.04050599807457202,0.0,0.0,0.07343915612295578
mentalhealth,HappyChatter11,2020/01/11,"Is this OCD? Hello, I am wondering if these habits have anything to do with OCD or something else entirely. Some examples are ...

\- When I wave someone goodbye as they drive off in a vehicle, I MUST blow them a certain amount of kisses otherwise I feel they will be injured in a crash. (Its often 100+ when I feel satisfied)

\- Every droplet of water from the shower head must fall on me after I turn it off otherwise I feel my family will be injured/it determines how long they will be safe for.

\- Every night and throughout the day I constantly check power points, switches and locks to make sure they are off/locked. If I don't do this I can't sleep, and stay up worrying. Even if I have checked, I feel as if maybe I did't check properly and that something is still on/open. There is no certain amount of times I check things but I do it until it feels right. It is so time consuming.

\- I have little decorative lights in my room, they flash multiple colours. I feel I can't turn them off or the main light off when the decorative lights are red in colour. I feel if I do I will be injured while sleeping.

\- My hands feel infested with germs sometimes, I have to wash them with lots and lots of soap for a long time.  Sometimes my hands get dry and sore afterwards. Even when I haven't done anything to get any germs they just feel dirty at times.

I would love to get these habits sorted out at some point because they take up so much of my time.

Thanks for any responses. :)",1.8607648819421383,4.263605343642613,2.6689058862653816,92.64730295976057,81.4742268041237,6.366522558474671,22.445516018179802,7.601502580125103,0.9209830617448178,1149,38,243,19,31,360,148,291,0.061,0.86,0.078,0.705,2,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,10,1,13,7,0,0,8,0,32,12,5,2,5,44,51,25,0,8,9,0,11,0,0,7,4,0,2,0,11,10,1,1,10,0,4,2,5,0,0,0,1,17,40,7,35,39,8,41,0,0,3,2,12,19,0,14,19,161,51,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14800703331423595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910446418721102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06633762068298217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759923327333055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701819697696579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136392967728746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090783070709646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437534119146111,0.0,0.18337650119129256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258884035114277,0.0,0.4952185771174774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17056691209390956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168401220192496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906944847216683,0.0,0.1926102383630438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18503520855073247,0.098217198620576,0.0,0.07264033981170513,0.0,0.10932754445518622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999758303342658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212321366586496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20574622241811366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293442944037628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21780360797007933,0.0,0.09220555536745144,0.16755485222647545,0.21525788083906133,0.0,0.0,0.1159910658414036,0.0869063586038138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256459053531708,0.0,0.08182151308181154,0.0,0.0,0.10018979381974033,0.0,0.0,0.07229730731719257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172784536391764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367368130957917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801413258666232,0.0,0.11051525537044,0.0,0.0773048883397358,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ArchitectSnowflake,2020/01/11,"PLEASE DO NOT COME BACK I am praying that my depression may never come back. I hope that when I get sad about something, it will never be the same as feeling like I am carrying the world. Let it be like one of those typical sadness that normal healthy people get.",2.6099999999999994,4.8736692307692335,3.4429230769230803,88.90207692307693,77.84615384615384,6.467692307692308,25.784615384615392,7.554174236665415,1.3973415384615389,208,8,41,3,5,66,38,52,0.187,0.586,0.22699999999999998,0.1598,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,0,2,10,14,2,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,0,1,5,3,3,9,1,8,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,7,32,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3730277667362226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4178884078276845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089168141857198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226457659524054,0.17328511287007398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534554705317316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24091708898370096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480343207945746,0.0,0.2370054017391253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3741548834096101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376575744866917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436512359046407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816075732573402,0.0,0.0,0.2662583485269357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867347543682205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i_yam_not_creative,2020/01/11,"How do I help my suicidal friend I've already tried all the standard common sense stuff to keep this person happy and all my persuasion to this person to get some help from a professional has failed so far. 
This person is really close and precious to me but I'm afraid that due to the emotional stress and depression I might lose them. 
They get irritated and agitated at even the most minor inconvenience, need special care and I'm trying to discreetly help without making it too obvious. 
I need some advice",5.782240601503759,7.519066021052634,6.471278195488722,72.83894736842106,67.73684210526315,10.06015037593985,29.360902255639097,10.290406445055957,3.2730902255639087,412,15,70,11,7,135,67,95,0.233,0.574,0.193,-0.8375,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,2,2,4,10,0,2,4,0,4,0,0,2,3,21,13,8,1,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,6,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,8,5,9,12,5,5,0,3,0,0,9,3,0,4,2,46,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221467987729722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19447956657369408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17968320018099446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15179083932749685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982405134560294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640147261936586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615862701283826,0.0,0.18415089639437407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18760530117734747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35437956489076283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664565412421405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19716174563845326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763814733908536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18695735187545687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26135185303125136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4616444846392384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290057347568028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20187645351724148,0.0,0.2017467676910311,0.19277234882877867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393038231014901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16988413024106405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,j_jbunny,2020/01/11,"I need help I don't really know how to do this.. I've never really used reddit but here goes. As of recently, about 3-4 weeks ago. I've been hearing voices in my head.. mostly telling me bad things. Anything that happens they chime in. Today I was done with the voices and I am done with everything in m life. I just wan everything to stop moving so fast I just want to stop and be happy. So I tried to kill myself today.. I wrote a letter to my best friends who I haven't talked to in months. I also wrote a letter to my mother. I left in on the bathroom sink. I filled a tub with warm water and jumped in. I held the knife up to my wrist and I tried I really tried my hardest but I couldn't do it. I really don't want to live anymore.. i don't care about leaving my friends and family behind. They won't even bat an eye if I go. So I just cut my arm a few times and sat there. I don't know what to do. I'm done with everything.. i just want to die. Why is it so hard..",-1.0717181883536997,0.8817229065420555,1.6807476635514007,97.67235801581595,90.96261682242992,4.9745506829618975,14.772825305535585,6.490185161304077,-0.6175537023723945,738,14,182,9,26,255,115,214,0.134,0.7340000000000001,0.132,-0.5054,0,0,0,0,0,3,30.0,0,0,2,1,15,9,2,0,8,0,18,6,4,2,1,33,34,16,2,6,7,1,2,0,2,1,1,3,0,0,7,10,1,3,2,0,0,4,8,3,0,0,9,6,33,6,28,22,3,24,0,0,1,0,14,9,0,2,11,120,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769363237020614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715557916528153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048552154468188,0.0,0.0,0.09997599047332452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10143914850658016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12749635159963246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238672412041123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608753012375962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729796202349538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024305706339444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275623710423458,0.0,0.11453004225393977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18772588063025733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904561652660264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743328324272483,0.12932845735548398,0.10883125540975927,0.0,0.12468387977478007,0.0,0.1369281583624726,0.0,0.0814322448211002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344107816819351,0.0,0.13353554981585902,0.0,0.0,0.1286404609908163,0.13199933565901315,0.0,0.08581204176478817,0.0,0.0,0.10727797315759907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09697222884398717,0.12912473642041042,0.0,0.0900833605644672,0.09370064518800178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31131864420731503,0.0,0.11995680483745358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203142306409102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764913045489884,0.10618769145993136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071261585122208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084184708040668,0.0,0.23031679517463075,0.0,0.0,0.24745138399683675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492842850705274,0.0,0.0,0.2149740041087796,0.0,0.09745202010833956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962590749001687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,varthe,2020/01/11,"Frustration when losing Hi all.

I'm a 17 year old male, and I seem to have some problems. 

When I was younger, I played a lot of videogames. Whenever I lost an online match or a 1v1, I got SUPER angry and frustrated and was  in a bad mood for the rest of the day. I gradually stopped playing my favorite games because I was  afraid of losing. 

This translated into into real life. For example, whenever I get a test back with a score I'm not happy with I get angry and subconsciously put it in my folder and forget about it instead of focusing on improvement.  The best advice I was given was to  ""Just learn to lose"".

I don't want to be like this. I tried to change many times but my feelings always take over. I don't know if this is the right sub, but I desperately want to change. Any advice is appreciated.

Thank you.",2.72147212543554,4.511654335365853,4.448083623693378,84.03646341463417,75.76829268292683,7.612543554006969,24.519163763066203,8.418075326091056,1.5682017421602792,637,21,130,12,14,215,103,164,0.172,0.696,0.132,-0.1721,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,6,6,17,2,1,11,0,11,1,0,0,1,28,25,11,0,4,6,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,9,0,1,4,3,0,1,3,9,0,0,8,1,18,7,21,16,5,16,0,4,0,0,4,7,0,5,9,86,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030329552631433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901692622514732,0.0,0.0,0.10544169141133157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119226564286808,0.12946318903551607,0.09451916942577064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627190735676485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3280520698571754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999966749334188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839970427278838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620180997012108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240104417709082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16505732519234032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521334407519546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951886671049607,0.07575130402223397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5203955884152556,0.16925920249823326,0.13182093393369249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719990404236914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270255680314585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836525118812194,0.0,0.15587158528611975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17648481915850414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241483476985275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14115487550142647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963166195172815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165809291625168,0.0,0.0,0.14275242312406902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041293795561464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527114293026768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18290913348148086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984936506856698
mentalhealth,Othmaun,2020/01/11,"Loosing friends! I am 25 year old male from Saudi. I usually mostly do not approach people wether to start a friendship or not. In this case my friend who I am missing since 2017 because of a incident happened!




We were like brothers we go to the gym together care about each other. I share with him my struggles with mental illness which is I rarely do. He is one of the quietest people I've ever known and quiet the opposite. Before the incident which made the friendship is over I was having mood swings. 



After the gym session I went to the shower rooms at the gym and had shower unlike most of the days where I did it at home. I forgot a t-shirt. His roommate called in a way that is insulting and impolite! I went crazy driving from home to the dorms and I was exploding and yelling at him ""WHY ARE TALKING TO ME LIKE THIS! WHAT SORT OF ARAB ARE YOU""




After that we never talked to each other. Keep in mind that I didn't tell at my friend. But his roommate while there were there. 




I really miss him. I want to call him ( a normal phone call ). But I don't know what to say, tell. All I care is we be like we were before!



Thanks!",1.4198289665211057,3.6677301004366782,2.7137827510917027,92.60086335516745,82.05676855895197,5.388719068413391,20.895378457059678,6.6274283507984215,0.3259998544395919,879,26,184,9,24,283,129,229,0.073,0.77,0.157,0.9651,2,0,0,0,1,0,26.0,5,1,0,0,5,15,1,1,15,0,22,1,0,1,3,33,37,9,0,2,5,1,0,3,3,0,1,3,6,1,13,14,0,2,2,3,0,5,5,4,0,1,12,3,32,10,27,24,5,26,0,2,0,0,30,10,0,4,13,131,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811562071100141,0.0,0.2265715429594553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.407828853563476,0.0,0.2714744809509429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858593120370421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042577651442965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.308573026510575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756621473372857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772844265222115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670850797278548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833409468374427,0.0,0.0,0.07316602380572675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19512513351834104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597298996310846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13416603331261093,0.0,0.13442565918785734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267982789438583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304413756341415,0.0,0.0,0.1396999410539126,0.0,0.09021388387777396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18459433124001776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528795277605478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587213900129318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012840443143312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423171871450996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391787735954179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21401338035673054,0.23272697560900146,0.12257032395541335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466264065062401,0.0,0.07852487283436177,0.10567421346131252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468299296473705,0.1201311825682301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573282859485896
mentalhealth,destinationarcadia,2020/01/11,"I confronted my dad about his abusive ways and haven't felt depressed nor anxious since I have been severly depressed, insecure, anxious and also suffered from dp/dr for nearly 18 years. I never truly knew what stemmed such intense negative emotion for me until everything seemed to naturally fall into place.

I have a wonderful partner who allows me to be me. I have told him everything he could ever learn about me now, as a teen and as a child and he has listened and shared positive advice on how i can improve. Although it's a great help, i found most of it wouldn't stick with me nor would i actively try and improve myself.

When i was a child, for aslong as i remember, my dad would beat myself and my brother up. He would also be incredibly emotionally manipulative and abusive. Somehow for 18 years living together, he pitted my brother and i against eachother and we never spoke a word to one another. I assumed my brother was like my dad and hated me. I was scared of my father, saying the wrong thing would make him spin out of control but i will always remember being scared of him more as an adult despite the fact he couldn't beat me anymore. I feel i constantly disappointed him with everything i chose to do and believe and i would be in a vicious cycle of despising myself and feeling suicidal because if my own father can't stand me, i must be an awful waste of space.

After meeting my partner 2 years ago, my world didn't change straight away but i had never had such a positive person within my presence and i knew this could only be a good thing. For the first time, i had spouts of empowerment and contentment but when i would start to enjoy these feelings i would be reminded that my dad is bringing me down whenever i have to visit.

Around 6 months ago whilst feeling said empowerment, a huge surge of acceptance came over me. I penned a huge 5 page letter to my father. I told him exactly how he made me feel. I told him the very few memories i had as a child were when he was sat on my chest punching my face. I told him about conditions I've suffered with that stem from this abuse. I told him that I'm okay now. The only thing stopping me from happiness is that i still have him in my life.

My fathers response to this letter was simply ""you don't understand, when you're a parent youll know why you have to do the things i did"". This could've broke me but i chose to just accept he wouldn't change and in turn accept his faults and mistakes, and move on focusing on myself and how i can finally make use of this potentially beautiful life.
Its been 6 months now that he hasn't contacted me. Since then ive been in contact with my brother who weirdly suffers from the exact problems i do/have suffered from. We are close..ish now and I'm so whole knowing he is okay and living better.

For the first time in 26 years i feel happy. Content. Good about myself and all it took was to confront the negativity in my life.

Thankyou all for sharing your posts on here - they've helped me alot. I hope mine can help you too and never give up thinking one day, things can change.",4.62656423942051,5.787164878688529,5.398623713305375,81.6240316431567,69.88524590163935,8.297369424323294,29.59588257720168,8.638961771785754,2.2341856652687757,2456,94,472,40,43,799,276,610,0.15,0.7020000000000001,0.14800000000000002,-0.7423,3,0,0,0,1,0,52.0,2,5,0,6,27,37,5,3,25,3,60,5,2,10,11,104,99,49,1,17,6,13,7,1,2,12,3,4,0,7,23,34,0,2,23,0,0,6,16,21,0,4,31,11,97,16,69,46,9,71,0,8,0,0,71,27,0,8,36,344,120,2,0.0,0.23527241044798836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467994547906736,0.11734659877578073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586398207783904,0.055075249138319265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940581831343948,0.0,0.14955135775277847,0.06564253542118409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0589229905548491,0.0,0.0,0.062187533404272785,0.0,0.0,0.04034871203943367,0.0,0.0,0.07457328342900693,0.0,0.058539534514254914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757035436490572,0.0,0.0,0.21006022240286032,0.0,0.0,0.0715277025397,0.07423753366260435,0.15854160368550949,0.0,0.0,0.042686970974263536,0.0,0.11401842420076568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14890932191395176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05987249961200253,0.0,0.0,0.17846148041796234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20080543095527964,0.0,0.06355262623853246,0.07250773425556771,0.0,0.11260208797897145,0.0,0.07257374302126676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349532569719328,0.0,0.11103379467261047,0.0,0.07297453213920836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092063069629746,0.0,0.06534876355738205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330969633504038,0.0,0.0,0.06574144583819436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275240996922691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025552412171638,0.03233701238778941,0.0,0.11689368253759885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263042689855748,0.08836446418588491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056641974098433,0.07034932476168525,0.0,0.0,0.2041987399609741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970389701945684,0.10068071171548046,0.0,0.0,0.0734959841481514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05779441512274621,0.06915429488611306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339157004410273,0.0,0.0,0.06333473763276214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14996037129351894,0.0,0.06296169504742846,0.05263681733883005,0.1325351532631506,0.0,0.0,0.06025674431091976,0.0,0.07477567887638924,0.0,0.10950583907260704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04684950934484367,0.0,0.05285929162968292,0.05533766992515912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240094178383025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21986794251396616,0.042411776767000565,0.0,0.0,0.077191655838136,0.0,0.0,0.31623614254673205,0.07353934754758645,0.0449385564638419,0.07199553889928509,0.0,0.06890595762595654,0.0,0.057166769887858036,0.0,0.05461354986243946,0.0,0.05253841401390502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059726035321382674,0.07389859245142252,0.0,0.0,0.07178005788115825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3291355422041113,0.07236819925447961,0.0,0.17049634705628064
mentalhealth,pi_exe,2020/01/11,"Just realised I(M21) might have been depressed last year. So sometime last year, I had a really hard semester. Ended up not eating as regularly, lost about 10kgs, and even after the semester ended, all I was doing was drinking, and lazing in bed. In my head I was just unwinding, and seeing as I spend most of my time indoors my friends just assumed I was relaxing playing video games and they didn't  see anything out of the ordinary. 

This year when I got back to campus, I changed schedule. Now I'm up at 4am, I do a question or 2 on codewars, then shower, breakfast, and then either go to class or work on a personal project. 

What I realised was, I'm actually happier now. I am talking a lot more to my friends, drinking less and I even sent out a internship application earlier this week. 

What I think I'm saying is, much as we're told and educated about the signs, sometimes, they're so subtle you never realise till you are out of it, or if someone tells you. So always try to keep a journal, tacky  and played out as it sounds, it's what helped me come to the realisation I was legit out of it.",4.936448230668415,5.494837926605506,6.071847968545217,79.26486238532111,68.81651376146789,8.98086500655308,32.543905635648755,9.04235418022936,2.72629515072084,860,37,169,15,14,288,132,218,0.036000000000000004,0.882,0.083,0.866,1,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,3,1,2,14,7,0,0,10,0,16,5,1,0,2,33,29,23,0,1,9,0,1,0,2,1,0,2,2,1,9,14,4,1,3,8,1,3,3,2,0,0,13,5,22,5,29,15,7,34,0,2,2,0,15,12,0,9,19,121,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.1419905754533894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107069473641525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197371080968546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188332718491127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539235709972515,0.12533851264972432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532208248453935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850763707953157,0.0,0.1488865612904796,0.0,0.0,0.25774609626386685,0.0,0.0,0.19220758008264685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248315216001769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269307871339036,0.0,0.11637256272539505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13034269259669592,0.0,0.14932872502534975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975280310257612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12933033161931531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372097934143529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588344245717926,0.1237020018931785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15435638129831955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696192627726213,0.0,0.11222138663996878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12704817681754754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16299739060843685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321336547289208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571034436759375,0.0,0.0,0.2318951448626576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232847723842652,0.0,0.2878136652114443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695032410768445,0.1271766054099333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323286518941773,0.0,0.0,0.08484434974325923,0.0,0.0,0.13903497515822694,0.0,0.09878742877521553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671425319944705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592839178675988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28109874459600315
mentalhealth,Esrild,2020/01/11,"What should I expect from a therapy session? Hello, hi. I haven't gone to therapy since 9th grade, and I don't know what to expect. I will have an appointment soon with a therapist who specializes in childhood trauma and insecurity. Will therapy as an adult differ from as a kid? I'm a bit anxious about it tbh.",2.647759562841532,5.001157737704919,4.817622950819676,78.63058743169401,78.18032786885246,8.656830601092896,26.560109289617486,9.2995712137729,2.7056863387978143,246,10,46,7,6,85,42,61,0.145,0.855,0.0,-0.7882,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,6,0,6,0,0,0,0,7,9,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,9,5,1,4,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,32,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687950166672637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597597155443609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485879115488041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307610010641888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968195025507032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8162866624707031,0.2762569603028802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1DR1NKBL3ACH,2020/01/11,"I am confused I am confused on what am I feeling because of my father this started when I was on 3rd grade my parents wants me to go to a taekwondo class at first I thought it was just a one off thing and you're done but no my friends we're also there too but overtime one by one they started leaving and by some time I was the only one there out of my friends but I was afraid to go because we've been attending competitions sometimes I win sometimes I don't and when I don't my father would beat me for wasting our money and losing because for you to get into a competition you will have to pay about $10 which is a lot for my country or at least for my father so this incident keeps happening every time I lose so I slowly started disliking my sport because of that and also my coach and teammates are really toxic but I cant really go because I am afraid that my father would beat me up again and it would start a huge huge problem for me. Sometimes my father would hurt me not only because of taekwondo on reasons even today I cant understand why he had done that to me on a simple problem I perfectly know parents beat their kids for discipline but I know for myself its different with my father and my father is a big person. after years of this there's a problem sparking with my mother and father they would fight about money and then my mother just left the country because she really can't stand my father anymore so he worked outside the country but she acts like she just went abroad to work which is one of the reason she said she would go outside the country to go and sustain my education. After months my father would grow and grow more angrier. one time he beats me for blaming me for a broken sink cause I was washing my face at night while he was sleeping and the water keeps coming non stop so I called him to fix it I didn't do anything besides turning the knob and he gets angry at me for breaking it I know to myself that blaming me is not the right way because there's many factors leading to it being broken so I denied that I broke it then he curses at me then I told him ""why would you say that to me"" and he just shouted nonsense like me being a tough guy and disrespecting him. months went by again now my mother called my father addressing our problems and one of them is the sport problem after the call I was in relief I say to myself this could be my happiest day of my life but it isn't after that call he called me with an intense voice then he said sit over there then he said many things on why I cant leave my sport one of them is college he wants me to be in a varsity player of the biggest university in our country so I called my mother to tell her about the stuff that is going on they got into a fight and my mother decided I should leave  our house so I did but I really cant move so I messaged my friend to come pick me up and she did and dropped me off to our friends house who is willing to keep me for now so monday rolls and I have to come to school i told my teacher and he called my father to come talk to me which I cant so he came and I was sitting at the counselors office with 4 adults and just me and I also forgot my father has an affair with another woman that time and they said it was normal for my father to do that I was really confused which is right and wrong so I just agreed with 's them so it could just stop and now I am back with my father after months there's no change at all with him still the same person. I am confused with my mental state right now I don't know whats happening to me I am always tensed up if my father is around more if he is holding me by my shoulder, I cant sleep at night because I always remember the time I left the house and the counselor thing, I panic when I hear keys because my father always has keys one his belt so when he arrives you hear keys, its hard to be happy, I feel different but I don't know what, and I cant play games anymore because I tensed up when I do its like there someone in my back or someone will shout at me I really dont play games before but if I did I get shouted for it. its just hard for me to understand whats happening to me please help...

​

sorry for the poor punctuation and grammar my English is bad because its not my first language also thank you for reading",3.2320727810849874,4.298298255271924,4.480816769246292,87.25218603908121,73.10654827968924,6.925644906333032,25.860172199239912,7.1686216300943375,1.10475863854976,3412,110,715,33,66,1126,296,901,0.14400000000000002,0.779,0.077,-0.9961,4,0,0,0,2,0,22.0,5,5,8,13,52,35,2,7,32,0,78,7,4,5,2,128,128,74,0,22,26,24,4,3,4,12,2,12,1,6,42,49,1,8,14,9,4,19,20,21,0,11,30,16,153,14,104,79,7,112,0,4,0,0,106,39,0,11,50,532,195,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288464432023235,0.11150261726680694,0.04839799998976524,0.05427677903945169,0.0,0.04683852557227035,0.0,0.0,0.08859774723982873,0.0,0.0,0.03675814081413212,0.039764187887451716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869421118956555,0.037296099665703485,0.3267520032051097,0.0,0.03800936704227122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31927874283864344,0.05108854633922307,0.0,0.04588656853102418,0.04725305619335952,0.15391087259885053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132788133080359,0.0,0.0,0.02880730794861401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333756990884227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142219938000046,0.05235082363678125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02950293942503822,0.0,0.03763490364900525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04517119045348778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598953380934102,0.0,0.0,0.13804223037940547,0.0,0.07001190731266332,0.0,0.1523158800148488,0.0,0.03572525773798828,0.0,0.0,0.04422856261290711,0.11849988386804633,0.047550153034150576,0.08002790654818469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006886654021299,0.0,0.02994016771200232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15462339312039325,0.04781825561471585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191095045661808,0.0,0.0,0.1227424334729043,0.0,0.0,0.14189159288470274,0.09706430803144712,0.0,0.031550486269799886,0.06546791112596158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09994462969600476,0.0,0.03797532508386128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057313252178303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04501506180497855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696124617615883,0.04747525102234986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838362010764355,0.04376537370241669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724150898958639,0.06794439147772102,0.0,0.05240853433539831,0.0991975490422475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800513721879085,0.0,0.049032294257140056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21370727990183064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04468030996136915,0.0,0.1716936412581557,0.09185274361389896,0.0,0.0,0.05060038809670341,0.11443925284675192,0.1699588325713279,0.07104392613984405,0.0,0.0452066254939302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940096192378302,0.0,0.07569447927326536,0.0,0.13253404147922204,0.05000241760656352,0.12646559005107913,0.0,0.03567209987422027,0.07468926758255738,0.0,0.0,0.05113442753296823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03590262492669625,0.03904199495231043,0.041124497550383776,0.0,0.0,0.08902674586838277,0.0,0.0,0.035461578863410635,0.1302319976119468,0.0,0.042340251638455104,0.08536480087395262,0.0,0.0,0.04858619884855643,0.0,0.09300238904380703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05269294942380358,0.03545555557321789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281577880823066,0.12091836825973468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503799537838616,0.0,0.0,0.2538481871221318,0.04883768873803115,0.05427677903945169,0.028764870531135082
mentalhealth,DividedSK,2020/01/11,"I feel I have something deeper than intrusive thoughts I have thoughts that make me feel like I am walking a thin line on being sociopathic or something.

After break up with my ex I attempted suicide and lost the little of friends I had because I emotionally abused them with suicide threats. And my ex got the most of it. I am visiting therapist and am on duloxetine. This year of school I got into alcohol and lost friends there and made myself even bigger weirdo among classmates who now know I have issues.

I have nightmares with my ex and my ex friends blaming me hating me... Even family. Also nightmares of not being adequate at my skill of piano playing and composition which I study at Academy. People frowning on me that I compose and play like shit.

I feel as if going full don't give a fuck and just messing with people. Being selfish to the full extent. And yet I care about well being of my now girlfriends mom who is a pure good natured soul having a shitty husband and loners life because to her surrounding she is boring and they ignore her out of family gatherings so I am happy to spend the weekend at my home with parents and she thanked us for finally resting from her mentally ill husband and I get that it was a fresh new routine out of her kitchen job in school and being only in her flat making food and cleaning.

When I feel like shit like now I just feel this thoughts of being fucked up. Like let it go... Release the beast in cage. I fantasise about decapitation my girlfriends head and throwing it in the bed where her mom sleeps and making it look like the father did it.

Or sending professors to go fuck themselves. Or emotionally manipulating my girlfriend to do some sick stuff for me. Or grope a stranger. Rape them... Post disturbing statuses and stuff on Facebook to scream for help.

I remember when I was little I abused our cat (just throwing small ball into her when I put her on bed then when she ran away I repeated it... But thankfully no gory torture with animals... I have a dog now and I love her very much)

I cried a lot in school and used the argument that my father, who at that time was aggressive drinker, will beat me and mother up... I woke up crying in boy scouts camp with whole camp around me concerned about what happened and I can't remember why I did so.

It feels as if I am loosing humanity. And if shit gets worse I will have nothing to loose and turn into one of those psychos on the street. Or a drunk... Or in jail.

Alcohol is ôk now.. I don't drink heavy. I started hobbies with astronomy studying celestial sky and drawing. Yet I still have these moods when it is like the ID is fighting with superego and Ego is slowly letting it slide.

I will have a discussion on this topic with my therapist  ut I have to wait till Thursday so what are your thoughts?",3.7892457362478993,5.807691942909763,4.507986628232847,83.76739911121791,73.40147329650092,7.447337657138282,29.11558171190648,8.252601668568683,2.127158411402033,2227,94,421,37,46,713,266,543,0.17600000000000002,0.7170000000000001,0.107,-0.9918,2,0,6,0,4,2,53.0,2,1,3,5,29,40,12,1,20,0,43,19,5,6,1,82,84,50,2,3,14,12,7,7,6,3,5,1,5,2,28,43,6,2,13,6,1,11,5,20,1,1,17,9,75,19,70,56,9,78,1,2,1,5,49,41,6,12,31,310,103,5,0.0,0.17310955492821453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561409287717255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05841972753688391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503184532283435,0.0,0.0,0.06863484041243126,0.0,0.0,0.08906374831336847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448147130675131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604885744945809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156323398608802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643475305419528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965004289129966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773401220490944,0.0,0.2216239807739046,0.1043768510199379,0.0,0.08002499049039201,0.0,0.0,0.08833487350597374,0.0,0.16931958348039325,0.2026064317048777,0.07633340063007663,0.07007821837588392,0.12455155349045695,0.06127262459663396,0.116852854730042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459971922719664,0.07776530495093563,0.0,0.07212381183786347,0.07497251673311188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048965274007295514,0.0,0.07327719950887895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762473992424905,0.07249292417092927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04014751650782292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940141666305706,0.051598849416092635,0.2498269177450237,0.14643476518136533,0.0,0.0,0.06134535439551921,0.0,0.1594899648675283,0.062106271953245314,0.06593236061171509,0.06912365099287865,0.14628850588351608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361932160628863,0.0,0.0,0.1711154426389651,0.0,0.0,0.05370168938539178,0.0,0.0,0.07055416078779879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009544764935903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049501984716767734,0.05555940397474594,0.0,0.0,0.08111569742073672,0.0,0.0,0.10129023794414643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996370583129621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343752450147778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550754771071904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22179783615922635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249607523868788,0.0,0.0,0.07310484428848027,0.0,0.0,0.11247813106455536,0.0,0.0,0.051706643136663163,0.0,0.058339490999464186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16725432398658646,0.15981425256855386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451309360299007,0.0,0.1696382068643911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23198078814797604,0.04259725936692131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945969316126478,0.0,0.0,0.08787266592854784,0.06309354806919762,0.0,0.06027562236304013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656825993664591,0.0,0.06591814594255442,0.08156004623361045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07444631761129178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0470431488857954
mentalhealth,kit_kat_pattywack,2020/01/11,Im going to have a break down and need ways to calm down Hello it's currently sad boy hours and I started thinking of an ex who lied so much to me and I'm thinking about what he did to me and I'm about to break down there is no text lines working what so ever and I can't call anyone because my mom told me to go to bed,-1.0425000000000004,0.6427228000000014,1.5969166666666688,100.311375,87.66666666666666,4.283333333333334,17.375,5.148860815047168,-0.8458999999999999,250,6,65,1,8,86,51,75,0.10800000000000001,0.861,0.031,-0.6808,1,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,9,13,7,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,2,0,6,1,13,11,1,12,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,0,4,40,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952236267186296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17019816010176375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850951392985537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525530248573313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.317352392989435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749564566030707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30158467563741725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269964946869332,0.0,0.0,0.20524464556761066,0.20702378718458547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976196981051071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578010800114522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667882413026254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22161652622498093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032614406313498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Corrugatedmisery,2020/01/11,"I have felt my mental health deteriorating at a slow rate for several months I'm not exactly sure what's been going in with me the last several months. These are not all new symptoms they have just become more defined and easier to spot.I have been sober from alcohol for 135 days at this point and as there were multiple reasons I kicked it, one of them was how frightened I would become after drinking a 6 pack of beer. I began to hear things that were extremely overwhelming, even started seeing things some nights. I carried on this way for awhile and noticed it was beginning to affect various portions of my life, so I stopped. I still had symptoms sober however much lighter. After a few weeks, I began to experiment with smoking a very small amount of marijuana a night to reduce anxiety, stress, and help me sleep. It worked for a few days. Then even at such small doses, I began to hear overwhElmont voices and even see things. My cat at one point mutated into a large rat, and a small boar. It spoke to me and told me to cut off my finger or it would hurt my family. I curled up in fear on my couch yelling at my cat for maybe an hour, and then the feelings subsided and I realized it wasn't real. So, I quit smoking marijuana. Now I hear voices occasionally sober mostly internal garbled that gets lost or I ignore and sometimes it's external and those always freak me out. Haven't had any crazy visuals sober, just basic distortions similar to what I assume someone with vertigo will see. I've been medicated for depression several yeas ago and seen shrinks, none of that ever seemed to help and I've just been coping by myself trying to get through long twelve hour work days, taking care of my kid, and keeping my wife happy. I just got my insurame back and feel I really have no choice at this point to seek out a mental health provider, but Im afraid 1) They'll think I'm full of it. Those rooms always felt so judgemental. 2) I may have some serious problem that will ruin my marriage and me raising my daughter.
I'm really lost at the moment.",5.294678362573098,6.335384917293236,5.965814536340853,78.61149540517965,68.24812030075189,9.520133667502087,29.564745196324147,9.725611199111238,2.727172765246451,1638,59,309,36,27,534,220,399,0.096,0.8740000000000001,0.03,-0.9646,1,0,3,0,1,0,37.0,0,0,3,5,17,17,1,4,13,1,24,13,2,3,4,57,56,26,0,3,9,2,5,0,0,6,9,7,2,1,23,22,3,3,9,2,0,1,6,14,0,2,22,16,40,3,50,28,13,56,0,6,4,0,14,24,0,8,30,203,63,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566528104690569,0.09122242324178534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205044707744413,0.0,0.0,0.05804679991927333,0.0,0.06529912331590443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563552262473445,0.0,0.0,0.1885438155409391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702881880699698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16514777707261766,0.0,0.07351926857429149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836189674364481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691357231937243,0.07721177362420374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349712557388195,0.08046852580539206,0.09605219722056442,0.08631978274892649,0.0,0.16391535419942616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919272908824344,0.0,0.048511280235985464,0.0,0.06826909930053537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086585583376328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146447818352415,0.2886161611704917,0.0,0.11442818957926812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16812212560702752,0.0,0.0913781858449161,0.0,0.09220197507830094,0.0,0.0,0.07587067814880617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957868144520132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06029132934267911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553970725786968,0.0,0.0,0.1863580701410268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575422338453502,0.0,0.0,0.0859898461295931,0.17204285813260972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362648986339711,0.0,0.06274841934717876,0.0,0.0,0.0824399030732425,0.0,0.16020659607952534,0.0,0.0,0.0971813734535278,0.0,0.0,0.11568244243617158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420745056384121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167668723269475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078941696208098,0.0,0.09715681576577866,0.10936585660010198,0.08776289482351253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20405934570631493,0.0777072968594346,0.0,0.2892928887593582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542028152603341,0.0,0.07232409574072762,0.0,0.08442187415231402,0.0,0.06041728228119489,0.0,0.068167517402742,0.07136364225380946,0.0977780297593424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044950476057014,0.177440613205615,0.06417907166436387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17012545573966226,0.054694367663872194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08156383517756069,0.0,0.05795291112230561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042981462473473,0.0,0.06775371256761616,0.06846954947845357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428420803451508,0.0,0.0,0.12127265267756167,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fantastic_Relief,2020/01/11,"Food delivery for special needs I'd pay good money for a delivery service aimed at people with mental illness/mental disability/general special needs

I only using food delivery when my anxiety/depression are too much to handle even the most basic human interaction. I like that I can place my order and have food within the hour, without having to talk to anyone or struggle to get cleaned up. With this in mind, everytime I leave instructions for the drivers NOT to ring the bell and to just leave my food in the porch. 

Almost everytime they either ignore it, forget it, or they can't read in English well enough to understand my instructions. The only time they're successful is when I've messaged them multiple times especially right as they're pulling up. This stresses me out to no end bc that means I have to sit there a stalk the app and still I have to ""talk"" to them which is what I'm trying to avoid. I don't want to talk to them and I don't want to risk running into my roommates when they go see who is at the door 

I'd pay extra money to have drivers that are paid more,  specially trained and app developers who can send out special alerts like DO NOT RING THE BELL! or 'client has special needs. Make sure the food is packaged in their specified manner' (like if someone needs greens in one container and chicken in the other)

Idk if that makes sense. I just needed to rant.",4.742686567164181,6.30042476119403,5.266597014925374,81.17056716417912,70.04477611940298,8.345074626865673,28.69850746268657,8.841846274778883,2.2924202985074618,1108,41,205,20,20,355,148,268,0.09300000000000001,0.8009999999999999,0.106,0.8577,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,7,1,10,17,0,4,13,0,18,5,0,3,1,42,35,15,0,9,11,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,1,13,11,5,3,2,1,5,4,7,5,1,1,1,4,22,12,38,34,6,30,0,0,2,0,16,16,0,7,11,135,35,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371262558455492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07242011014539547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920660839966436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173425233653258,0.10701779835261607,0.0,0.06840847992609397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6261997474079214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054112214458663516,0.0,0.058862484120131724,0.08687147107951163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199778175969036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193360700707449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518004772183084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827053317622448,0.0,0.0,0.11282051977027766,0.0,0.0,0.10437644559729377,0.0,0.10457842537842188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613750491471946,0.3839874743294554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018322231193201,0.15754269340870355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180394208774565,0.0,0.10821093426441117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360025633547593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884501169904935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253365634942503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775641286587839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271291524586981,0.0,0.11864163749151453,0.10827618087680868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761559936999516,0.0,0.0,0.2497423013899029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078759836128347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703187443014886,0.0,0.0,0.10782234224740836,0.0,0.08945315093778733,0.0,0.0,0.12217916733563855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312387169398254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998399320201064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gauc-toast-sloth,2020/01/11,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me and I don’t understand what this is please help I’ve struggled with depression for as long as I can remember. I don’t remember what it’s like to wake up and actually want to be alive. I was diagnosed with PTSD when I was maybe 13  and then diagnosed with depression when I was 16. I do go to a mental health professional.

When I get into a depression episode (I don’t know what it’s called), I can go from thinking about something normal and I don’t know what it is but suddenly I’m thinking about really graphic violent things about myself and people always just tell me “oh think of something else” “go to your happy place” but the more I try to get my mind off of it the worse it gets and my mind will just obsess over it.

I’ve tried to think about and try and see how the original thought lead to the one involving me causing harm to myself. It just happens. My boyfriend gets mad because I can’t explain why I’m depressed because it’s random. 

I’m not trying to be an attention seeking dumbass but I don’t know what this is.",2.385928229665073,4.147724281818185,3.943971291866028,87.40964114832536,76.63636363636364,7.722488038277513,26.124401913875605,8.532816995589336,1.7821818181818183,842,32,179,17,19,280,109,220,0.183,0.745,0.071,-0.9825,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,1,11,12,2,2,7,0,19,4,1,4,0,43,43,18,0,2,7,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,17,13,0,0,14,0,0,4,8,10,0,1,4,1,24,2,27,36,1,16,0,4,1,0,6,5,0,1,8,116,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.10903080367810512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929669811311606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362171940944264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140871907839331,0.0,0.0,0.11477584621865247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849260369083726,0.22680395304234965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333474348823398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23349391523316398,0.0,0.1904934775131769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880105720966688,0.11893696188310827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876206704274694,0.0,0.0,0.07488919296177195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456120319263247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054584853768769856,0.0,0.0,0.0988761201922452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224619747885757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259595076842928,0.0,0.22562767237312306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947011211732284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571005698635244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745840627188956,0.0,0.11673240027783895,0.12264423437111642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060452336266384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157607551486092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253132999425082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903307114818315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202796537027304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680278497349784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765554828285113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422738592323971,0.2863641953236973,0.0,0.0886998712824995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30342500460366184,0.0,0.0,0.11631320716041604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590030648930206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081750487986013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386078721942244,0.0,0.12215746855162735,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,courtneylove02,2020/01/11,"How to feel less alone? This week I had a rather large breakthrough in my therapy and I told my therapist a lot of things I had previously been afraid to talk about. I recently broke up with my ex-boyfriend because I need to focus on my mental health and getting better. Problem is, he is the only person I would talk to about this because he's the only person that understood.  I am feeling good about having accomplished this in therapy but the only person I want to tell is him. I don't want to get back together, I just feel very alone because he knew everything about me and now I have no one I can talk to about this besides my therapist who doesn't know me as well as him. I miss having someone who loves me and knows me so well. How do I feel less alone?",4.552258064516128,5.051052774193551,5.376290322580648,84.124435483871,69.64516129032258,8.780645161290323,28.403225806451612,8.841846274778883,2.0014387096774198,600,20,125,10,10,196,86,155,0.091,0.775,0.135,0.7773,0,3,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,14,9,0,1,5,0,15,2,0,2,0,24,31,10,0,6,3,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,8,5,0,0,8,0,0,0,3,4,2,1,6,4,25,5,20,24,3,8,0,2,0,1,16,4,0,1,4,92,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.380582241050397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418579996177404,0.0,0.22400285466601366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833078413339108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008441999469576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24773468590224626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279899695166629,0.0,0.0,0.10273721974387083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019913881146053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13463252970761347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413501545164244,0.11055030635606268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343921075767778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09082338548859532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300111697653126,0.2794731937419996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32085569320267937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720458400585627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094223682891395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378378264463352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953539220459431,0.10706001169558398,0.0,0.2801516696890071,0.28443628537728066,0.08137566113558108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704264332701228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010655231545348,0.14449332797870731,0.0,0.09825257776221613,0.0,0.22026305185664416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701204278685926,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChristopherRobert11,2020/01/11,"I really need some advice for my cousin who I care deeply about. He is a kind hearted guy, 30, huge pot head, acid, mushrooms, dmt, all many many many times and a lot too. He is very smart and knowledgeable of certain religions and meditation but he can also be unstable and talks about suicide and death every once and awhile when things aren’t going well. Like some really dark stuff. I took him to Star Wars last time he was down on Xmas and he seemed happy. He has suspended license, as well as couple warrants possibly just to throw that in there. I hang out with him and talk about normal things with him but he’ll still start going off on rants about things I can’t follow. He’s interesting if you look at it with an open heart and mind but he often starts saying some wild things about religion/spirituality. He is also an excellent artist. He’s been posting an unusual amount of crazy stuff on Facebook and I’d like to know if he is dangerously mentally unstable and how I can help. Here’s an example:

“I have a hard time meeting people. 
Introducing myself as my birth name feels like introducing you to a mask. It's easier for people to relate to me as Michael but it feels fake.
Some people have a hard time pronouncing YHWH.. understandably so. Elohim is a little easier to pronounce.
Some people have alot of preexisting concepts or narratives that are sometimes challenging to navigate.
Some people have alot of expectations.
Some people try to use me.
Some people just renounce my existence or call me a fairy tale.
Some people are afraid that I exist.
Some people prefer I remain invisible.
Some people think of killing me.
Some people accuse me of trying to impose my beliefs on them, when in actuality they are trying to impose their belief onto me that I don't exist which is clearly wrong and abusive.
There's only one being in existence who shares the name of the father of creation YHWH and that is his son Yeshua, so when people speak of Jesus the Christ, they're speaking of me. 
The Tetragrammaton is the Y-H-W-H is the name. Some believe the name is to holy to speak and instead say HaShem, Adonai, or Elohim. I like El Shaddai. 
Some people pronounce it Jehovah, some people just say Jah. 
I pronounce my name YHWH Christos Elohim. It is important to me for reasons that are my own. It is important to others as well. It is mine, there is no other with that name, there is no other like me.
I remember hearing them sing my name at the powwow Hearing the drums pound as they chant my name. Tears are coming to my eyes.
Thanks for listening.”

Can anyone give me some advice?",4.0727742433005565,6.179089923076925,5.001191440138811,80.15577597840758,72.84615384615384,7.7816849816849825,24.514941199151732,8.563005593585519,1.7783111239637557,2058,63,371,38,42,670,241,494,0.135,0.728,0.13699999999999998,-0.7099,1,0,0,0,0,1,58.0,0,2,5,2,28,24,3,1,22,0,35,4,4,3,3,82,58,37,4,6,12,3,4,5,0,1,0,9,0,1,26,21,0,0,12,3,0,7,5,6,3,1,3,16,45,18,58,52,22,36,4,0,2,0,53,16,0,26,17,254,71,2,0.0,0.08121742003250891,0.06689234136257068,0.0,0.0,0.1339673858821921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963460801491566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04792991227262452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07722940830917276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06999452497430413,0.0,0.06988860831244324,0.0,0.0,0.059047486407254414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584635694010293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057754112471182575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931921596607828,0.04897025213005865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575687979007565,0.07791409580467328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787266956779082,0.0,0.07296994598334418,0.1228099521317444,0.0,0.07034937366608655,0.0,0.1545157272207228,0.1624579180469686,0.045945854666503326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583750459460638,0.07138153357408122,0.037671839810691964,0.05587525237133265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744390339020254,0.06870246900021547,0.0,0.0,0.057562523536613286,0.0,0.0,0.058276519490465514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084888112634498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06907962264573735,0.0,0.06921329923323327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05082700349791618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06716186492002668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300070788934226,0.0464494693762197,0.05213336087940374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6653095795433981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727685599161041,0.06564942860476553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782639612322124,0.07047810903063166,0.0,0.0,0.07765080342645543,0.0,0.0,0.16353485074419974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062402947755406564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779509795161197,0.0,0.09703635725579368,0.0,0.05474201521633045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15694066903591716,0.07497969296624994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019155289278416,0.0,0.06310920519411281,0.0,0.0,0.1821592970106929,0.0439223844578918,0.0,0.0,0.15988208196464368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615864606457155,0.1396174863055944,0.0,0.0,0.07136022569658793,0.0,0.059202915714297435,0.0,0.05655875599945904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184896943341511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494578422504904,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,batosaur,2020/01/11,"i've never heard of or found an illness like mine and i need an answer for it tl;dr at end of post. i write dates in month/day/year bc im in texas, so mind that if you write dates differently. 

in mid 2013 i began to experience classic symptoms of paranoid schizophrenia. late 2013 my grandfather, whom i was very close to, died. 

the various psychoses got worse, hallucinations, delusions, disconnection from reality. it wasn't pretty- i wasn't the goofy psychotic kid that everyone wanted in their friend group that said ""i see dead people XD"" i was the kid in the corner of the class that would cry, laugh, then cry again, then be sent to the nurse's office and writhe/scream on the cot as ""demons"" stood over me.

from early 2014 to later 2017 i was put on various meds that slowed down my metabolism and gave me minor seizures. they dulled me down, made me worse for wear, to say the least. 

then, in 2018, it stopped. i got off my meds. i started to be ""normal"" again. ""normal,"" as in no hallucinations, no delusions, etc. i was happy. im now, pretty much, a functioning adult. im 19, im healthy and strong enough to get a tattoo in a generally painful area, i can hold a job. 

12/26/19. my gender dysphoria (i am a trans male, pre-T, unable to obtain it) flares up and to this day is still at an extreme level of difficulty when it comes to dealing with it  

01/09/20. 1:15-ish pm. i'm waiting for a haircut. i see a drop fall from the ceiling of the parlor and fall into the ground, and the ground ripples as if it were water. 

01/09/20. sunset. i feel strong hands on my shoulders when there couldnt possibly be any. 

i have heard of depressive psychosis, but not the type that comes back the exact same way. the reason why i think this is... different than any other type of psychosis or illness ive seen is there are mismatches, inconsistencies. for example: meds didnt work. anti-psychotics, anti-depressants, etc etc never worked. the symptoms just... faded away on their own. that seems impossible. i also still have mild delusions on a monthly, sometimes weekly basis. it concerns me, especially since medicine doesn't work for me- it only worsens it. is this something to be concerned about, or am i overreacting and just need to reassess my situation?

tl;dr, i have an illness that seems to be a periodical psychotic depression, but acts differently and cannot be treated like psychotic depression. it seems like something to worry about, but it also seems like an overreaction on my part.",3.274364429896345,5.852840871794875,4.1275922895071835,83.2051145662848,77.24786324786325,6.88896162938716,26.196763047826877,7.987972078202968,1.7655474995453715,1960,76,363,34,47,628,249,468,0.129,0.8140000000000001,0.057,-0.9813,5,0,2,0,0,0,102.0,0,1,3,6,17,15,0,0,30,0,30,10,3,2,3,53,59,28,2,9,11,0,2,4,1,1,6,4,0,4,25,14,1,3,9,0,0,7,11,5,0,0,20,9,39,10,60,31,11,68,1,4,3,0,20,30,0,9,32,234,64,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240446088802181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054828383385464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286735400418426,0.059636545269673685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336169753213579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17038544420080587,0.10003569703037246,0.07995786091719766,0.2671989199258255,0.0,0.08049192075869789,0.2430916717801476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869248137623643,0.08013711272528996,0.25948966696319364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741090366072861,0.0,0.07586562748413228,0.0,0.0,0.039215149249339734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503724677036308,0.05992034538711327,0.0,0.040520331165857695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12405883485483095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256086808175682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350994730184897,0.0,0.07696335471342974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874876735254429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515617295048943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338630812999583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584450272470865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831046042986597,0.0,0.12381051404913973,0.0,0.05701331841895475,0.11501506474296375,0.11963347842738467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519787851029178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05898559293446,0.08252611559052553,0.0,0.0,0.0839866725306259,0.0,0.053768258082139885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874338637273015,0.0742781667389191,0.1578067013718237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796620583488552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797415125352815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377446685173145,0.06167643887317426,0.0,0.0,0.123605774447191,0.28241991785072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06415595139749214,0.08717731689341969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941433453854902,0.0767058555840293,0.0,0.0548952433948523,0.0,0.12387423989149166,0.06484112431328909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612228369478627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04969539363359167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399264697284357,0.04574512770855739,0.061561136182747764,0.062211546793217574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998312878462841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693872578984257,0.07876289764847295,0.1580744166400772,0.055094267190716084,0.0,0.0,0.04994416484010546
mentalhealth,Spookymetallica,2020/01/11,"No friends so I’ll vent here I keep seeing posts of my ex best friend and her boyfriend and it’s pissing me off. She’s dating the guy that called me an “ugly white boy” and she hasn’t known the guy as long as me, 6 years beats 2. I’ve know her for so long and I guess I really didn’t know her. She gave up on me when I tried to help her. Don’t really know who I can call a friend anymore and on top of that I’m feeling so insecure and just wish I could change my entire fucking face and body all is see is ugly. The people who say I’m not ugly are just saying that. It’s all bull Shit. I’m done here",-0.6990372670807439,0.9249140652173936,1.5934161490683252,101.19521739130435,85.8840579710145,4.8124223602484495,14.929606625258801,5.773587663045528,-1.0629002070393376,463,7,123,3,14,156,84,138,0.14800000000000002,0.701,0.151,-0.1571,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,8,8,3,1,5,0,9,5,4,0,2,21,23,13,0,2,3,1,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,3,7,7,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,6,19,4,10,19,3,11,0,0,3,1,22,5,3,1,5,70,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156101857857686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16518513676681554,0.0,0.0,0.17483967162935932,0.0,0.0,0.32145290038753777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16651190557407486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256737912607508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610783074881425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795878785985986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648283838421931,0.1455168888629738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17339756938116424,0.3117081871420792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550416799566698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990735679361124,0.0,0.0,0.25951434432608705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785940770078121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912368507105752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507489281592647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016732721220596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503469716879748,0.0,0.0,0.2508602302706889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16157230808593487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686656309720136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810061194253327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013626163381142
mentalhealth,Le-Cheggs,2020/01/11,"Mixed feelings At the moment, having just recently started cutting myself again, I am feeling a few different things. I am very lonely at the moment. I have been imagining finding a nice girl that just supports who I am as a person. At the same time, I never want to be hurt by someone I have grown to trust like that. And now I’m feeling really depressed or at least pessimistic even though I’m hyper as hell.",4.371041666666667,5.867044687500003,5.245000000000001,81.20666666666669,70.875,7.333333333333335,29.583333333333336,7.793537801064563,2.0587083333333327,325,13,58,4,6,106,56,80,0.21899999999999997,0.624,0.157,-0.7585,1,2,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,2,0,6,0,8,0,0,0,1,12,16,5,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,1,3,7,4,9,14,3,13,1,3,0,0,3,4,1,1,9,46,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22376850453767003,0.0,0.0,0.271439519665255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17159786169849342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3940935976170378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23745583093765496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27812518255972346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269269410440274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003765925982552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268505275932304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664368719484498,0.0,0.256524763133442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201307910128084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838903618937906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29482210516621393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17260200195537947,0.0,0.25525576872570466,0.0,0.15149359860711178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21436522151355056,0.15323892506856274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kichigaionna,2020/01/11,"Everyone please stop ignorantly mock mental disorders!!!! Please everyone refrain from saying “The weather is so bipolar” as well as other disorder terms insensitively and such. 
I know some people who suffer from it and to see them be put in an uncomfortable situation where people mock their disorder is very hurtful. Just knowing and being told you have a disorder is already hell so please don’t hurt them more. Bipolar disorder is Not a choice and isn’t something that most people have but please respect the people who do. Thank you.",7.13066869300912,9.268388297872342,7.096079027355624,68.10500000000002,64.95744680851064,10.052279635258358,34.705167173252285,10.290406445055957,4.133023100303952,436,20,65,11,7,139,64,94,0.24100000000000002,0.609,0.15,-0.7442,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,3,0,6,10,3,0,5,0,11,2,0,0,0,14,16,9,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,3,7,1,0,1,2,6,3,6,13,4,5,1,3,1,0,9,2,1,2,2,48,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371243703613945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6424194645760234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21424534915088464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24002489937482085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123221727202813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297709986691995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31088244439303303,0.0,0.0,0.492237591852464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269811183473495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915167964460677,0.0,0.0,0.08933445742870558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126012532013078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630514903467475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372614969650504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321270882300028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712267457544232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249969788730357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079731008427907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lillazilla,2020/01/11,"How do I ask for help I dont know how. I'm very young (14) and I dont want to be a nuisance to people and ask for help since it's expensive and I'm a waste of money but I'm tired of this. I want to live but I also want to die and I'm scared. I binge eat a lot. I go from feeling empty to very angry or emotional. Little things make me really nervous. I dont know what I'll do during the summer, I have self harm scars on  my thighs and stomach and dont want to tell my mother because I dont want to be a disappointment. I'm sorry for using this subreddit, I dont belong here because I'm not diagnosed I might not even have anything, but I'm just scared. I cant sleep but then I sleep too much. I cant eat nothing but bread for days then I binge eat junk food. I want to die usually but there's small moments where I'm scared of death and I desperately want to live. I'm not going anywhere in life. People already have plans and I have none. I'm useless and a waste of space. I'm really sorry for posting this please dont be too harsh I'm just scared and confused. Why do I hate everybody but I'm afraid of them leaving me. Would getting help for this be a waste of resources? Help is expensive, is it needed in my case? How do I even ask my mom. I dont want to worry her. I dont want her to tell everybody else and worry them.",-0.4154729729729709,1.4608634662162174,2.2492567567567576,95.41179054054057,86.63513513513512,5.321621621621622,18.37162162162162,6.6274283507984215,-0.11164324324324326,1030,27,249,12,32,357,123,296,0.28300000000000003,0.622,0.096,-0.9955,0,0,0,0,0,2,27.0,0,0,2,1,13,11,1,7,7,0,27,12,4,5,0,46,62,25,3,11,13,2,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,8,11,5,0,3,0,3,2,15,11,0,0,0,1,33,0,27,56,3,17,0,2,0,0,16,7,0,4,7,142,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07097480695563259,0.05143384548829934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05292696199975106,0.0,0.18038160883885768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841342749273149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04147879243460642,0.0,0.0,0.06527984754488071,0.1335006511845119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6784056518421359,0.0,0.0,0.19743536895815075,0.053728144891855366,0.07234735464095968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496082333030386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03252033192734415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777717121714783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033602692952693206,0.0,0.07310504661872667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349918341802856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17243985508103665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069328282979713,0.0,0.0,0.06810183883407529,0.0,0.0,0.045428613931240064,0.0,0.06446198402498984,0.11358521544705336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054679549703149886,0.0,0.0,0.042931732855575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822959446111639,0.0,0.07532665426929454,0.0,0.0,0.04727999446017639,0.04768983611797852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061713372790964775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917786281360307,0.0,0.0,0.07060015325667761,0.0,0.0,0.06159738477458261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240553543788594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575679645110175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709608902130602,0.0,0.0,0.05320323585396356,0.0,0.1287258063025344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399401046642712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124308323255002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04272899454992599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392230320353438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055548766478769385,0.07083548815626034,0.10613562158003348,0.34141960162231794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058035596471139476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13063296323580365,0.0,0.04568856400224056,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymoususer6252,2020/01/11,"hey guys (and gals) need some help here.

i feel like I'm suffering a psychotic break.

haven't been able to eat or sleep or get out of bed.

had to move in with my mom and shes in a really bad place too.

she basically has to give me a fork of food for me to eat.

the town i live in is dying, cold, dark gray skys most of the year. i feel trapped. i have debt and worked so hard to build strong credit but I'm having trouble holding a job idk how I'm going to pay the money back

I'm really losing it man.

this is just the tip of the iceberg. my life story is so so dark and tragic in a lot of ways.

i just want to be happy",-0.6608814589665677,0.9026562907801434,2.062679837892606,98.21250000000002,85.38297872340425,5.4470111448834855,15.035967578520768,6.5431188927421005,-0.7367309017223911,471,7,124,5,14,164,92,141,0.168,0.737,0.095,-0.8678,2,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,9,9,0,0,10,0,11,5,1,1,0,20,22,11,1,2,5,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,6,3,1,2,0,4,2,1,5,0,0,2,5,11,4,19,19,3,13,0,3,1,0,8,7,0,5,3,71,13,4,0.1869396271065568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437450341504065,0.15608678016053412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19401381897577102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3825718161181542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890445847447887,0.13354970695722782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260481391333241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766823951460367,0.17932952444400127,0.10624209811005343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850996214417972,0.0,0.19900070918317087,0.16746118720265202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530169153130616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18550873464559328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204098708693532,0.09132925911896518,0.0,0.16507111562782545,0.0,0.0,0.20913762542751452,0.0,0.15892938594166722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21894143190739565,0.0,0.19868723903604266,0.0,0.13861336479609768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953121222549312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395166239743752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870746326695633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102618355061745,0.14838397467377845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609427497378654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203829908001942
mentalhealth,sumsem,2020/01/11,"help haha recently, i’ve been feeling rather down i guess is the best way to put it. it isn’t really a result of anything that’s happening around me as there isn’t anything super bad or difficult to deal with happening right now. 

i just feel consistently alone even when i’m surrounded by people. even just hanging out with my best friend feels not the same and i’m not sure what to do about it. it’s been a few weeks of this and i don’t really know who or how to reach out to speak about it.

i have spoken to my mom briefly and she slightly dismissed it although not on purpose i don’t think. i don’t know what to do about this because i constantly just feel like i don’t have friends and feel exhausted by the end of the school day. i nap almost everyday after school because i am so exhausted even when igo to bed at 9 pm (i wake up around 6).

if anyone has any advice or anything to help it would be greatly appreciated haha",2.5627007772020707,4.169008725388604,4.03250971502591,87.63612208549225,75.73575129533678,7.519300518134714,25.015867875647675,8.278499904357787,1.4482748704663209,736,25,158,13,16,244,110,193,0.073,0.737,0.19,0.9742,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,18,14,0,0,6,2,17,3,1,2,1,36,30,14,0,3,11,1,5,1,2,1,2,1,1,0,13,10,0,0,8,1,0,2,9,4,0,0,2,6,15,10,29,26,4,23,0,0,0,0,9,10,0,6,11,109,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275812868632383,0.0,0.0,0.13073653581931302,0.1352203250804292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878497500453414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129027705834183,0.0,0.3223181700217048,0.2324513697449233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901177559534383,0.15917578678019045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740283978015177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410884976602091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420011255193119,0.13460116915255996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563701428689907,0.0,0.0,0.2587000657575028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33007417137631057,0.09327177273227076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017399778486551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14394237115700784,0.14382607009998105,0.0,0.2309067679835115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502263631653095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350423485251354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637848041334827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290977377497972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051355699281832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124841434455595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727958919515706,0.0,0.12891181050506045,0.0,0.0,0.11149714726605248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26426648137144376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12305083620850513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365729157643605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363209832662723,0.10472700041122812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274576248548566,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ClearSkinJourney,2020/01/11,"I think my therapist has damaged me further. My therapist for the past year has said some pretty demeaning things. I have tried to leave her practice multiple times, but have been met with “this is not how to handle things in your life that are uncomfortable. This is a good example of the negative behavior. You leave jobs and relationships that dont suit you.”

I thought, man, maybe she’s right. I’ll stick it out.

So I did, for a year.

She demonized my mom for drinking when I was a child (I’m aware of the damage it has caused) to the point of whenever I brought her up, brought up good moments that felt like real progress, she’d remind me that my mom is “unstable” and it could go wrong any moment. Leaving me feeling like every good moment needed to be met with the anxiety of “when will this suck again”. She gave me no tools and left little room for forgiveness.

Whenever I would get a bruise from walking into something, I was labeled as “careless” for not practicing good self care. As if being clumsy was synonymous with not loving yourself. Whenever I walk into something or trip, I’m reminded of how “careless” I must be and how that coincides with my self worth. 

What made me finally walk out was this.
I was explaining that I felt my boyfriend was being distant. I felt my needs weren’t met.
“What are your NEEDS Kiera?” She said nastily as she made quotations with her hands. “People have so many needs, and they don’t even know what they are, they just want someone to fulfill them” 

Feeling almost forced into saying something to defend myself, I replied. I said felt sometimes like the only one who was willing to voice any issue within the relationship. I felt he had almost “checked out.” 

She then (without apology) said “I’m glad I got that out of you! This is why it’s good to be direct sometimes.” 
Almost trying to turn this into a good thing..

Regardless of the context, what was said to me next was out of line.

I have come to realize my past habits of leaving uncomfortable situations is not mutually exclusive to wanting to leave her practice. I feel manipulated, and even though I can say I felt she was wrong in how she handled me, a part of me says maybe i’m being defensive. Maybe my mom really is a terrible selfish person and I can’t help but continue to helplessly try to pursue a healthy relationship with her; or at least forgive.

Maybe I do leave all things that are uncomfortable and without “valid” reason.

Maybe I am too needy, maybe I need to give myself more and expect less from others.

Maybe I am careless and self destructive. 

I don’t know.",4.228579429735234,6.1584741771894125,4.8664964358452165,82.0353454684318,71.99389002036659,8.250122199592669,28.568279022403264,8.912814788092511,2.368988961303463,2035,80,381,41,40,652,232,491,0.17,0.7020000000000001,0.128,-0.9768,2,0,4,0,0,0,54.0,0,5,4,1,14,27,3,0,16,0,51,4,1,9,2,83,98,28,0,13,12,3,10,3,0,4,1,9,1,6,28,26,1,1,18,1,2,8,13,13,0,1,35,19,69,14,59,51,6,44,1,3,0,1,56,21,1,7,18,265,97,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16775986988553465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595201938620741,0.0,0.04272070369847538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05693694176406301,0.057367434874954576,0.0,0.048104882556168536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04458709506951698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544905321483732,0.05470611166007632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376921004416773,0.0,0.04705119500600212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470960270692064,0.03989514830851492,0.3217154652065027,0.061174653820354065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02917631935886319,0.05357089983042963,0.03173757814433738,0.28103707919692617,0.044663753736332516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03743122827330698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058286895440764874,0.05541680809214492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061381086309729486,0.0,0.0,0.3547860288839546,0.060674948551794526,0.0,0.03944445018006003,0.08184804939987278,0.055970616255870666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050401622184068566,0.10568237232832968,0.0,0.05661731142361416,0.39272143444656493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19621235633908912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20703904456539546,0.0,0.0,0.05939100078361166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0378415137560348,0.04247207383334032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060473888271340724,0.10661932429683413,0.038715376307094984,0.048761051137277085,0.0,0.0,0.05279087325722531,0.0,0.0,0.05681368566988147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356299024930796,0.03577526096284461,0.05741719697119655,0.0,0.17986749843704936,0.0,0.04769069028980166,0.2656033827297105,0.13322878360362828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17477321747149782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277128457119788,0.0,0.0,0.04731665767474777,0.12897491186320187,0.11046279607409554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967897298133002,0.14840177156359086,0.035782744948042094,0.05486669889627572,0.04433410213784772,0.03256323530310338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374375422512388,0.06074251545703765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587677922343559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05039075586018967,0.0,0.0,0.10766374174581364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03967015787258178,0.12211385674777855,0.0,0.0719237410731946
mentalhealth,Altruistic-Duty,2020/01/11,"Me and my girlfriend argue over stupid stuff Me and my girlfriend are constantly found bickering over the most tedious and stupid little things, and it happens a lot. I have bad anxiety and stress and sometimes she is a trigger but I try very hard to not take that out on her because it is my problem and shouldn’t be hers. I am overwhelmed with the workload of my daily life (senior in high school, applying for a big scholarship I qualify for at the college I’ve chosen) and it’s really hard for me to relax and have a good time and that always leads to us getting into some kind of conflict, I have a short temper and get angry easy in these scenarios, whenever I come to my senses I always just break down and think that sometimes life can be meaningless and should give up, but I am not going to give up on her or myself, but I always think I’m the bad guy. In her shoes, she loves me dearly and I love her the same, but sometimes I wonder if that’s always going to lead to these conflicts, or if it’s just my mental issues and I’m not worth her trouble.",8.850583979328164,5.851055381395347,8.709922480620158,75.16545219638243,62.62790697674418,11.416020671834627,35.98191214470285,9.150863307647796,3.0477338501291986,837,26,167,10,9,273,116,215,0.184,0.691,0.125,-0.8584,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,2,2,16,4,2,10,0,13,5,1,3,0,48,30,23,0,5,13,0,2,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,12,19,0,2,4,1,2,5,4,10,0,0,1,2,31,6,26,25,4,26,0,1,0,2,17,17,0,8,3,124,43,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4244369194987317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975546339923176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21295251231929455,0.07773674795709347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984964676922968,0.0,0.13780690146551353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398222268912421,0.0,0.0,0.13325085543468926,0.2446630824474542,0.1449483529824864,0.1069601193558388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626767422212354,0.11276803832676377,0.0,0.2284708576479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347348963654706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13310072772689907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327954283248775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801463256552719,0.0,0.1278114008070702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084153699077913,0.23018870847679215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851304277795034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202214859980888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816944054536842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905993600803414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37837008901474345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607699799453994,0.0,0.14598315784703786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588131552539238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847205175438993,0.16342299093595114,0.0,0.0,0.07435960147148363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657964680436736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15339429145898795,0.0,0.0,0.10521970952999478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13829309501626166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,t96dream1,2020/01/11,"Need advice from those who have dealt with depression and/or anxiety. So my (M 23) girlfriend (F 23)and I had an argument back in October. She was already feeling depressed before then because she told me about it but I think she got worse after our argument. So after our argument she said she shut down toward me, became numb and now ever since that day she says she hasn’t had feelings for me. She says that she’s been trying really hard to bring them back but she’s still numb. The fact she tried to bring them back lets me know that she knows that she still loves me but she just doesn’t feel the love emotionally. From the argument till now I’ve been remorseful and showing her that I care for her and love her. And she says I’m doing everything right. We went on a few dates a few weeks ago and she was happy, smiling, kissing and hugging me, then last week only days after our dates she breaks up with me and tells me she doesn’t feel anything. 

Like how can she go from being happy and having fun to breaking up with me days later? Can someone help me understand. I bought a book on depression so I can learn all I can about it but I feel like hearing from others that may have experienced what my ex is experiencing would be more helpful. I love this woman, I’m giving her her space, but I would like to reconcile in the near future sometime. I just need advice.",4.158051470588237,5.478213408088237,4.680911764705887,85.72585294117648,71.16911764705883,7.792941176470588,24.99705882352941,8.238735603445708,1.3825229411764708,1085,31,219,16,20,345,147,272,0.11199999999999999,0.6609999999999999,0.228,0.9935,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,4,0,2,0,16,18,0,0,8,0,24,8,0,1,3,39,52,20,0,4,7,1,6,3,1,3,2,5,0,1,13,12,0,0,11,2,1,4,3,5,0,0,11,13,52,13,28,35,4,43,0,3,0,6,48,12,0,1,28,158,65,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059056513447738,0.09339188397213752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626314858041542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059717830719193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866991473570851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24303716428224986,0.0,0.06422414066575757,0.0,0.08965033707255557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741763244382513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038380327307736,0.0,0.27222933313960523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851150574146616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530068353442632,0.0,0.0,0.09468732823145178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663562146154725,0.07526646575178013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101067234195956,0.059876336841073276,0.0,0.08426295009471417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22430719473030586,0.09437843031267466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874405567774644,0.0,0.14123603397050746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11580198661781313,0.08587933665952198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077338174188588,0.0,0.1544151022917917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3803522113130423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562405236502071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012811146517035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674938574785605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997358976128914,0.1002178397994122,0.2513503547024936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715170890024324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892679372144356,0.0,0.1041999417230174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16827513987555315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208593249045842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750797681736324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067233116471468,0.0,0.1430598413564817,0.0,0.0,0.109679483968487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902072210773258,0.0,0.0,0.09766622102424306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736693356970696,0.14968399444436273,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadmaneee,2020/01/11,"Whomstve I genuinely just don’t know who I should go to at this point : 
I am constantly having mood swings, feeling numb, feeling above everyone OR like I’m worthless, having extreme highs or lows, not being able to get out of bed because doing anything makes me cry, wanting to do a lot of bad things just because I’m bored, being lonely yet loving being alone, etc. 
Honestly I’m just all over the place and I don’t know what type of doctor to see to help me? sorry if this is dumb question or whatever but my family has always been kind of anti therapy in every way so I never really got the help or guidance I’ve needed and it’d be nice to get some advice on how to deal with mental health the correct way?",4.119374999999998,5.0514432986111135,5.513500000000002,81.1815,70.875,7.982222222222222,26.9,8.238735603445708,1.7991383333333335,561,18,107,8,10,189,103,144,0.14,0.742,0.11800000000000001,-0.1026,0,3,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,13,1,0,4,0,16,4,0,2,3,29,32,10,0,4,10,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,6,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,2,3,8,5,17,24,4,15,0,3,1,1,6,9,1,8,4,70,14,2,0.16059891456293968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569354006089165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16633204138874166,0.0,0.0,0.13363116222717394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321592227709488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13409338543891186,0.19579921538467074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17355037283289151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17641036650332928,0.0,0.16557042903971667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437979421385815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17911024214351026,0.0,0.0,0.135311512093665,0.15345914518017442,0.0,0.0,0.15139836371256787,0.0,0.16240727332096974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16781260876676274,0.0,0.09127206414955706,0.0,0.1284456229660328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17070913623659045,0.0,0.0,0.21529213430342026,0.16968157072800988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672390558904882,0.1765219268386648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846051749093717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653545408987847,0.1449467905933088,0.0,0.10720102254177152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184593261161245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908206020696233,0.12386378351997306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677916839817316,0.0,0.15181788441864122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17990753909873028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288377703925372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797654209510045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17977733642641705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18365885513691027,0.0,0.10669478269939026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947254007836198,0.25495188623180604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vizionary0wl,2020/01/11,"I cannot cry anymore no matter what. Usually I cry to relieve the pain inside when I feel down. I deal with a lot of loneliness, and anxiety. I basically have no friends and it’s been like that almost all my life.  I’m 18 now And I noticed that I just can’t cry anymore. Now I have to sit through the pain and wait for it to pass. At times I want to cry but I just can’t. It’s like I’ve literally lost the ability to do it.",-0.9490813397129187,0.9504733263157908,2.1866028708134,94.76803827751198,89.42105263157896,5.980861244019139,21.26794258373205,7.348242739294969,0.6068947368421052,326,12,82,6,11,116,58,95,0.11199999999999999,0.631,0.256,0.8149,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,4,0,7,3,0,0,1,15,12,6,0,1,3,0,1,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,2,1,11,4,11,10,2,9,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,2,7,54,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627904142847412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436563747377133,0.0,0.3224515964045044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7143022315675395,0.0,0.16760257530335182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822002981282981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560121149747336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482802872511318,0.15884702198797002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17746440545110384,0.13821123650157904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185087070796568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3459719743397792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479589908588973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17904793399762978,0.0,0.0958880230609807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Stretchhawk44,2020/01/11,"Alternatives to therapy Hi. 

Alternatives to therapy when it is inaccessible, even with a sliding scale - any suggestions? DIY programs, maybe?  Nothing publicly funded is available in my area. (My physician is a good medical resource but cannot provide counselling). 

Thanks.",6.853571428571431,10.911657690476193,6.8066666666666675,58.73000000000002,79.23809523809524,9.466666666666667,45.0952380952381,9.2995712137729,6.514923809523809,221,16,25,7,6,70,35,42,0.08199999999999999,0.872,0.046,-0.3651,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,4,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,16,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20861696309687566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20262145356815206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573076285681382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3081958984835065,0.0,0.0,0.3090427134944791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943581008127644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28243644983546834,0.7016460241652909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jobo180hawks,2020/01/11,Help How do I know if I’m going insane and what do I do about it. I’m having some really disturbing and sick thoughts and they won’t go away and I feel like I’m turning into a vampire because I want to drink my friends blood and I hate everything. Please help me idk what’s wrong with me,0.11571428571428301,2.19118120634921,2.1549206349206362,95.64285714285715,86.14285714285714,5.504761904761906,20.11111111111111,6.868970318607317,0.2413873015873013,228,7,53,3,7,76,45,63,0.249,0.551,0.201,-0.6659,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,2,5,1,1,1,0,5,3,1,1,0,14,16,7,0,2,1,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,7,1,0,3,1,0,2,1,3,0,0,1,1,9,2,5,14,1,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,1,31,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25144963772085466,0.0,0.0,0.16314634894526292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26217805930346977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405309239206285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532308407067306,0.19119678298729875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20677228294625505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30420354846557496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26423178445087675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35877698078851544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708387781806026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13075176976428787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29378022634887724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17145229674875226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124703896282456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29110741627354997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785664166082486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926142345404432,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,la_poesie,2020/01/11,"Constantly feeling like I'm the worst person on earth, unlovable, & never good enough. I'm 22 and still live with my parent. All of my siblings have significant others. My younger sibling is moving in with her fiance. I've never even had a real relationship, and I don't think I ever will. I have a severe avoidant personality disorder, depression, anxiety. I have isolated myself for many, many reasons, but one reason is that no one cares about me. I can't even talk to my sibling anymore, but they jabber at me whenever they want to. They dump all their stresses on me and all I can do is sit there and listen. And the rare chances I get to speak, they literally *always* interrupt me. I don't have anything important enough to say for anyone to listen to me. 

People talk about their life experiences, what they've done within the day. I have nothing to talk about. Maybe I just want to talk about a dream I had. Or something I watched. But it doesn't matter at all. My problems are nothing compared to troubling life and work experiences everyone else around me has. I don't have a job, I don't get to complain about anything. I've been deathly depressed and suicidal every single day for years on end, but no, please tell me more about your problems because mine don't matter. I'm nothing. 

I just don't see any reason for me to be alive. All I've done in this life is fail over and over again. I can't even get a job to support my family or myself. I really think the best option for me is death. I never feel comfortable around others and I'm so terrified of building relationships with people. I have nothing meaningful to contribute to others. I'm just a waste. 

Because of my avoidant personality disorder, I've been stuck in my room for 4 years this summer. Being alone all the time in the same place has made me kind of go crazy in ways. It has made me question my reality a lot. I can't stay asleep and relax because I'm always tormented with the thought of how bad this hurts. I often wake up in heartache, wondering if I'm really alive. It's really scary. I can never put into words how bad this hurts. I'm such a horrible person. I should've never been here. Sometimes I just feel like I'm in a dream. And when I talk, no one can hear me. I get this floaty feeling. It's really scary. 

Therapy isn't an option for me although I really need it. But I feel like nothing is worth it because I'm not worthy of anything. I don't deserve any kindness, goodness, or love. Also, I feel like nothing is worth it because I should just be dead. But of course, I don't want to feel this way, I used to want to have a life but that is just so unrealistic for me. And I don't deserve a good life. 

I know this is long and stupid, I'm sorry. I just wish someone could listen to me for once.",2.3508617852735507,4.410132060606063,3.9511898395721934,85.9499521801728,77.77005347593581,6.810928287398879,24.513951734539965,7.815909333733263,1.3457113396407516,2190,77,441,35,52,729,226,561,0.24100000000000002,0.639,0.11900000000000001,-0.9978,3,5,1,0,0,1,74.0,0,1,6,3,31,33,2,3,19,0,52,8,2,8,12,94,98,31,4,11,19,1,7,4,0,2,5,6,1,4,20,20,0,2,17,3,2,3,23,18,0,3,11,15,71,15,63,81,14,46,0,5,2,1,30,21,0,10,22,299,91,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06079352279329176,0.0,0.0469408444321225,0.09768303255251988,0.06359936014548333,0.0,0.07983343330123656,0.0,0.04490388111936712,0.0,0.058212736435141486,0.041043072007489724,0.0,0.14491058947130586,0.10450749646189972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802091306097466,0.17890906592640288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06160002809432275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059846618686785764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343178655483518,0.0,0.04686565161919285,0.0,0.0,0.07571082910174752,0.0,0.1011131644163662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13454620179656548,0.0,0.0,0.12013705907042453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049034725423531836,0.0,0.05198908861975714,0.1213016438403941,0.0,0.11630861214762064,0.0530957864022697,0.04945567568328891,0.05608854411006745,0.0,0.11483599810183864,0.05533533887025361,0.0,0.2077566394604508,0.16773571985416594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266932541542737,0.0,0.033359479424043534,0.14769952858762608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615701779859011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256750469445936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649760173183965,0.0,0.0,0.12225006404442712,0.03225893728347072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20730099791959014,0.1147076947684623,0.0,0.05183149225447449,0.05194596592191924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04990302031408418,0.05297732141189991,0.11108311129278914,0.0,0.11902130823537382,0.05897012481643728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062386784338323224,0.0,0.04352389281716657,0.226357942937942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33793442478119995,0.0,0.0,0.06251155423481301,0.11932604250186014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0651772867517386,0.0,0.0,0.08138773497063903,0.205011645779778,0.06132701480424834,0.06443288032312533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233229689708146,0.0,0.059007796825611934,0.06575529878408612,0.0,0.0,0.06681128143140297,0.18801750980371154,0.1810542498456486,0.0,0.12603957125895782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0466790801858812,0.0,0.0,0.046774781117979815,0.0,0.0,0.06631213828442803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049734704423150464,0.04518866036292029,0.058053915708334874,0.06570771036359338,0.0,0.06256435799729232,0.046876373559361015,0.0,0.06723846816684692,0.0,0.0,0.06420618756840375,0.0666099012790967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358965218980155,0.05130472123424985,0.0,0.06712638588893885,0.0,0.0,0.07522273680753343,0.0,0.046599729863598685,0.034227330552252036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05069630670079675,0.0,0.0,0.13848662623417954,0.09318362942832924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749991106999392,0.0,0.06365557887007789,0.042732911402175534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559929587316543
mentalhealth,Wintervsgaming,2020/01/11,"I don’t know anymore I am currently in culinary school, and I just need an externship to graduate. I had one lined up, then all of a sudden they are like ”oh your availability doesn't line up with what you need for the hours and I'm sorry for any conveniences this may have caused you” I'm annoyed depressed and feeling sorry for myself because I limited my hours from a well-paying job to work at this place (and ubers are expensive) and my stupid counselor was like ”ok let's try again” and now I don't want to do it anymore because I feel sorry for myself depressed like no other because I'm ashamed I think my counselor is ashamed in me hell I would be. I should have graduated last month but no I don't think I would ever, I want to just throw in the towel but I guess there determined for me,  but I just want to give up all hope and just die in a figurative hole on my own",4.776958041958043,4.799617225274727,5.580309690309694,84.52378121878125,69.05494505494505,8.815984015984018,29.732267732267733,8.575989854853784,1.9698615384615383,693,24,150,10,11,227,104,182,0.187,0.7290000000000001,0.084,-0.9114,3,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,3,1,2,8,12,3,2,6,1,19,0,0,1,3,37,35,11,1,9,7,0,2,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,1,6,0,1,1,6,7,0,1,2,2,27,5,22,27,3,21,1,2,0,0,5,10,1,3,13,104,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420725657225966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747752148614537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533454706361109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423116514829273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23863670718163,0.0,0.14377548329845485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531111755222585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009299275755205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289357007006924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15260982488305894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759462358962174,0.27285439067375866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747272292540058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613416724657605,0.11292296395293967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416594777523063,0.0,0.20304082108850494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057579647160827,0.0,0.0,0.20544107239776346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387361190148537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14473760126724006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402028902566931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4652293812023404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775328298798117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405487942145203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451312299242158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124557891504483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085374465492354,0.0,0.0,0.19681987502984144,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KoalaQueen11,2020/01/11,"I want my life back It's me, seeking validation from strangers on the internet. Again.

I had been living with my boyfriend for almost a year when we had a fight that resulted in me being kicked out and forced to move in with my toxic family. We are currently trying to rekindle our relationship, but he says until my mental health is better I can't come home. I don't know how to cope with this. I feel so homesick and lost. I am starting to really resent my family, and I am only becoming more depressed. I don't even know how to begin to rebuild my life. I lost my job due to depression, and I don't have the energy to leave my room, let alone get a shitty job in this garbage town I feel like a prisoner in. I'm on medication and in therapy, and I'm trying so hard to stay positive, but everything feels so hopeless. Things were flawed before, but it was still my life and I loved it. This feels like a bad dream. I want to go home.  I want my life back. Where do I even start?",2.278602213162493,3.889605415841583,4.115404775771694,86.72094641817124,76.52475247524751,7.9212580081537585,22.77344205008736,8.671277953709913,1.385937332556785,762,22,165,16,17,258,114,202,0.233,0.649,0.11800000000000001,-0.9811,3,1,0,0,1,1,23.0,3,0,0,3,13,13,2,0,7,0,17,7,0,3,0,30,37,17,0,3,3,0,5,2,0,0,6,1,4,0,8,14,0,0,6,1,0,3,4,9,0,0,7,6,30,4,24,28,1,27,0,6,0,1,8,11,0,1,14,110,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983223633188644,0.12394204764846467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840377134958087,0.09991946607912236,0.0,0.13216613244751452,0.10183037086748133,0.0,0.0,0.10583840568965212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308512385807743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061432216157601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15808183598486772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755169545493393,0.0,0.2256284844759053,0.0,0.24203502632857501,0.17098456897457975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252264500010843,0.0,0.06801122880082575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720083018597447,0.0,0.0,0.12720363269043508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400775699066957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375080541700866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153502406733195,0.0,0.0,0.12671326965585425,0.0,0.12237070089154528,0.3381058899854936,0.11692945167019572,0.0,0.10567081800043296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612679213079159,0.0,0.10800686311677704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055495281135314,0.12059923105601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12719029004761298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101444092514202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666367760286688,0.0,0.0,0.12848081365251607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516640120127058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16940610879621115,0.12755231616305776,0.09556863064238563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685309447529054,0.0,0.07950344221570703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624961732133095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21175343077773315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706356780114224
mentalhealth,EpicBruhMomentum,2020/01/11,"How to deal with Apathy? For the past two days I have felt very apathetic while at home.

I feel like I don’t want to do anything and I hardly feel emotions of sadness or happiness. I feel like I don’t want to talk to my friends, I would rather just watch youtube. My appetite has been affected and I have been feeling like I can’t eat as much. I feel like when I talk to my friends I have to half-force myself to laugh. I have a few things to look forward to but I haven’t been excited about those things recently. Things that I have enjoyed in the past seem boring. I feel tired more in the evenings.

Does Apathy go away?
Is Apathy linked to depression or something else?
What can I do to feel better?",1.3595833333333331,3.5749519027777796,2.4942777777777785,94.27850000000002,82.05555555555556,6.34,22.1,7.554174236665415,0.7676199999999995,550,18,123,9,15,175,82,144,0.156,0.638,0.20600000000000002,0.5519,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,6,14,0,0,4,0,18,2,0,2,0,23,31,9,0,4,5,0,9,4,2,1,1,0,1,0,6,3,1,0,10,0,0,2,4,3,0,1,4,11,21,11,20,26,3,12,0,2,2,0,5,5,0,3,11,84,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753857092143004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277823659502893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155759108828108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427784050755034,0.13472542401855822,0.11255456115061267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435901837526415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371834584173226,0.10916643808040284,0.14699750059471176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631296016283667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4625304235224224,0.37343150016996063,0.12547336987663607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019262108068968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426850081211316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13911137481746394,0.11706368321975658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13108277493266746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553747441252654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097383543214995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606489481569737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24949784564891864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12903081333275315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189662365502979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006039097973147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21007139596465388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604541147192744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019752778869352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765544930003306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782475167031293,0.15415699361194193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283137921795608,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisisaperson697,2020/01/11,DAE... feel like dissociation is kind of just like a mental seizure...,2.3724999999999987,5.237324583333336,3.466666666666669,80.89500000000002,94.83333333333334,5.7333333333333325,22.66666666666667,7.1686216300943375,1.1773666666666678,53,2,10,1,2,17,11,12,0.0,0.643,0.35700000000000004,0.6124,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586776678083301,0.36548337820752025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5327471862509581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4998786880555242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5155671607083181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YacoTrain,2020/01/11,"I want to shut everything out I hate how I've created an image of being silly to everyone I know, people don't take me seriously now and I hate it. Everytime I try to control myself I lose control and go back to acting like an idiot. I just want to stop talking to people",0.3245864661654139,2.640900456140354,3.940100250626568,81.31736842105266,88.2982456140351,6.76591478696742,22.177944862155385,7.957251820313856,1.6520997493734342,214,8,41,5,7,79,39,57,0.25,0.594,0.156,-0.8715,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,3,4,7,3,0,2,0,2,0,0,3,0,11,9,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,9,2,8,8,0,7,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,28,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762048787835666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5140302188729383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189659671448839,0.2059483689579234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023320165346258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4524832329040301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259367579140543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11195281372719824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256364125239828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31773233526271377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19158256733599344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17229489597755485,0.1841848843933244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558016865112126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27032131544092153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alien1772,2020/01/11,"I threw my life away and have been waiting to die for 3 years. I had everything I wanted, I was fit, had a girl I genuinely loved, and I threw it all away. I left school because I couldn’t stay past 3rd period having bad panic attacks with slight hallucinations, and what a doctor said sounds like “stress related IBS”. I went on to homeschooling and after a few months I was having constant mood swings and nothing made me happy anymore. I would ignore my girlfriend and only reply with “ok” “yes” “I love you too” and I could tell she wasn’t happy but she really cared for me so she stayed. I didn’t have enough energy so I broke up with her. I laid in bed and for the first time in years I cried. After a few more months nothing satisfied me anymore, only distractions could keep me entertained, like a good show or video game. After I finished one I felt so empty and sad. I left the house maybe once a month, getting fatter and fatter I couldn’t recognize myself. Went out even less out of shame and because most weight went to my chest so I have man tits. I feel ashamed to be outside, I can’t be shirtless when completely alone, I disgust myself. I hate myself with a burning passion. I’m a Christian because I’m scared of death, only reason I haven’t looked myself is because I don’t want to go to hell. I have constant nightmares. I’m just trying to keep myself entertained while I wait for death. I’ve been on my knees praying and screaming for God to end me now and take me to heaven while I cried. I have no motivation to better myself, this world is awful and I don’t want to be a part of it. I only have 3 friends I barely talk to because I’m naturally more introverted and it takes too much energy to deal with people. The only thing I want is someone to love me and to one day have a wife and kids with a stable job but I already know that isn’t in the books for me. Holding back tears righting this I feel like a pussy all I want is a fucking hug. I just want to feel important to one goddamn person. I can’t even tolerate myself how can anyone else? I make everything so damn depressing spewing this bullshit cause maybe one day I’ll get an answer other that “man up” “quit being a bitch” “pull yourself up man” “hit the gym” I know that’s the damn solution but if I had the motivation to do it I’d have done it already. I simply don’t see my life going anywhere, so I’ll continue to sit here and listen to sad music and hate myself until the day I finally die.",2.841051436851004,4.4082893900990126,4.284945665298238,86.27970538517269,74.9009900990099,6.986235208886742,24.19826128954359,7.678348718463194,1.1509690895918858,1942,60,397,26,41,645,240,505,0.242,0.6,0.158,-0.996,1,1,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,0,5,17,41,9,6,23,3,42,13,3,7,2,68,87,35,4,12,7,1,5,3,2,1,3,4,1,6,14,27,1,6,10,7,0,8,12,22,0,5,18,11,72,18,51,59,11,55,4,4,2,7,23,17,6,3,30,262,86,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517649677086742,0.16019940226756088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397025839478628,0.05075334062690633,0.07437223395881576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257627568537172,0.13639258745417385,0.0558136275655878,0.06060570695385789,0.22123667454880971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419581340247812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400556720083562,0.07456511405847333,0.0,0.0,0.07610432281314958,0.15687788034011108,0.0,0.11590693698058292,0.0,0.15946312252358033,0.14043457192404876,0.07483227356637183,0.06251762629453933,0.0,0.15066419649058088,0.0,0.0,0.07429414661022966,0.0,0.07427997933248455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606357175582079,0.0,0.06428904549638602,0.07500003468687405,0.0,0.09588383327469106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047000335191436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010395011486034,0.051854964240397886,0.06969328623979394,0.0795136657154907,0.0,0.061741032693617075,0.0,0.0,0.056079235071626515,0.06710395500067462,0.07584566350376842,0.0,0.0825038156030713,0.06088111925827035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15453683716149355,0.0,0.14332594429464793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375370915155061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202972601362255,0.12903432787629698,0.0,0.0,0.07978198278682579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772831639128235,0.0,0.1025383105610672,0.10638455688785764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06095338434547221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19653324477967404,0.06868198102118983,0.04845126205185055,0.0,0.14584341206592236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17381072013631596,0.0,0.053358559019883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13929513664204646,0.0,0.0,0.07730099259182723,0.1967427545271611,0.276022018117594,0.0,0.08516322892426073,0.0,0.07860282382053194,0.06929089730401762,0.05032151875794568,0.06337869816887112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772034182494475,0.0,0.0,0.0465000120709732,0.07462979389626212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06198746324875142,0.06904525736849197,0.0,0.07267056390821003,0.07346021491832737,0.057841099184695585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061501302682850666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15473257810530544,0.0,0.0,0.08314623421659663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091502485280764,0.0583413275030078,0.06344276549511665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048222458644170886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042325081464446974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04928066492614543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568761999193831,0.0,0.0,0.08838936026746036,0.0,0.20186194534797086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05156252589878496,0.0,0.0,0.09348512737801064
mentalhealth,ToldStoriesofTheER,2020/01/11,Anxiety Anyone else’s anxiety especially terrible today? Is it the weather?,6.297500000000002,10.137200416666673,10.350000000000003,31.545000000000016,86.5,15.733333333333334,47.66666666666666,11.20814326018867,10.619866666666667,63,5,5,4,2,24,11,12,0.47200000000000003,0.528,0.0,-0.7313,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6538219051430635,0.0,0.0,0.2988033424274204,0.437856342384429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35698448324941195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.405064662815922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pleasechoosea,2020/01/11,"Find way to hate things Every time I like or love something a lot I feel I find away to ruin it. I obsesses about something small and tiny and make it huge and then the thing I liked is ruined.

How can i prevent this?",0.4741304347826088,2.5852485869565243,1.8501739130434809,98.18395652173916,84.86956521739131,4.5495652173913035,17.895652173913042,5.6839178017228535,-0.5606730434782605,169,4,39,1,5,54,35,46,0.22699999999999998,0.541,0.23199999999999998,-0.1779,0,0,2,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,1,1,2,0,2,1,0,2,0,11,6,6,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,6,3,4,6,1,6,0,2,0,1,1,3,0,2,4,26,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24925323930062035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22352234849288208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341410445546566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4849493631488607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26192373469902985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592193208424312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255441896886506,0.2394389548872629,0.0,0.17708636869557978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084738647289447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.352500212759384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15469555722330736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105786990384664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,texascoloradoillinoi,2020/01/11,"Could this be anxiety in a 5 year old Today after school my daughter told me that as soon as she got on the bus she had a bad feeling. A feeling that there was a bad guy somewhere and she needed to be a super hero. She told her friends about it all day but couldn’t get rid of the bad feeling. She asked me if we could go places (McDonald’s, Taco Bell, take a walk) so she could see if there were bad guys there. I ended up taking her to the city park. I have anxiety and it kind of kills me to think I could’ve passed down or worse caused her problems with my behavior. I am taking her to a child therapist next week and I’ve talked to her about that and she is fine with it but I kinda just want to talk about it now. Any thoughts?",0.7688185654008457,2.5279692151898736,2.1104050632911395,98.69303375527427,81.53164556962025,5.479156118143461,18.761181434599155,6.42735559955562,-0.3111051476793252,568,13,139,5,15,182,96,158,0.18,0.736,0.085,-0.9683,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,2,10,11,1,0,10,0,12,0,0,1,1,28,29,12,1,9,6,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,8,7,0,0,5,0,0,3,1,6,0,0,7,4,23,5,20,16,1,18,0,0,1,0,23,5,0,4,10,90,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695894930174218,0.0,0.1956470696669898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954526414715268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4270789946972127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13136219158296886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083890825808567,0.0,0.0,0.0824683829468944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132587271919124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939713547234405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879541276539124,0.0,0.06680907489866053,0.0,0.07267394523850397,0.0,0.10227280665268372,0.0,0.0,0.2532314401094468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14147403236893225,0.13316146734239742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948172171080565,0.0,0.0,0.1359958317858678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418262927057034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360148876641684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235849201126932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941567846674282,0.10189930838851924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2884368120304208,0.20556113237203447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14847198702702674,0.0,0.08193672607943914,0.0,0.10151795755527884,0.0,0.0,0.12120994063091495,0.2443788604341704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542361020743425,0.0,0.10257309774337872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303148967075507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234689484386952
mentalhealth,fanficfan81,2020/01/11,"Is there some place to report abuse? I am living in a transition housing program in LA and was wondering if there was some place to report abuse and improper living conditions. 

This place is horrible....they charge $500 per month for place that does not even have heat and  they do not even give you a blanket and you're forced to keep the windows open. They do not have toil paper the amount of food they provide is tiny. They keep your medications your first few days and a unlicensed ""staff"" member hands them out sometimes hours late. All ""staff"" are clients that have been here a few months. They even had the power turned off the other day for lack of payment. There are people that drink in the house and do drugs right out side this drug rehab.  In the time I have been here the ""staff"" literally beat up two people before kicking them out and on numerous occasions threaten to bodily harm.  You're not allowed to leave your first month so I can not even got try to make a few bucks to get hygiene products. 

I can not believe that the mental hospital put me in a place like this... My only there option was a winter night shelter. If this is what a Christian are like I am glad I am not a Christian because I do not want to be like them.",5.645679012345681,6.06160311522634,5.393020576131692,85.25125925925926,67.23045267489712,8.455308641975309,28.13415637860082,8.238735603445708,1.6726111934156371,979,29,198,12,15,302,132,243,0.086,0.866,0.048,-0.8853,2,0,3,0,2,0,26.0,0,4,8,4,11,5,0,0,17,0,27,7,1,2,1,32,36,10,0,4,10,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,1,0,10,11,2,2,1,1,1,1,8,1,0,3,7,1,21,4,23,28,8,32,2,0,0,0,13,19,0,6,15,136,31,7,0.0,0.2455971996441029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317908674839229,0.0,0.08819154860174705,0.11676883114060865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368078959116902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069764828577163,0.0,0.0,0.10152951910567416,0.2403831961079176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738177579546646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17631534502317636,0.1253240907064873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414856921627572,0.0994226702061715,0.0,0.0,0.0828918250757976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206630796343108,0.2391774721246777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842432094733572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691247848080373,0.10974171442312997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15190246287182296,0.0,0.1830352379566474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918171443513549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440822211950708,0.1044465698828746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24817771709161496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726081986047848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882426845676704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143704365716168,0.0,0.5414181735669304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418864732127214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850954132927041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250440237974157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06043437415899841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036598725634176,0.11273253017766036,0.10124299077475188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611306261021216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239512426682084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Suspicious_Arachnid,2020/01/11,"[23F] What makes you feel better after a flashback? # Hi everyone,

I am 23 and the main trauma that gives me flashbacks is my abusive relationship. I have got myself into a real state with an emotional flashback to the day I tried to commit suicide. I just kept remembering how sad I was and how horrible it was and I couldn't stop crying. It's 2.52am and I want to go get some fresh air and make some tea but I'm scared I'll wake my parents. they know about my ptsd but it is still difficult to understand. I feel very scared and very alone, I want to wake my mum up really but I shouldn't. Does anyone have any tips or tricks that will make me feel more safe and human again?",1.2932608695652164,3.6078313695652175,2.705246376811594,92.05352173913046,83.13043478260869,5.998840579710145,18.620289855072464,7.3011,0.3054863768115945,531,13,114,8,15,172,92,138,0.188,0.698,0.114,-0.9318,1,1,0,0,0,2,14.0,0,1,1,1,6,8,1,2,5,0,10,3,2,5,1,36,26,13,1,4,5,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,9,1,3,6,0,0,1,2,6,0,0,4,3,19,2,10,19,4,10,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,3,5,70,25,0,0.0,0.19614491495375327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714557082917325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257694260098616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575359772191444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641196556196984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18184448460018546,0.10676346124185146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487040190439945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862169446070055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581862773463894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511150633980671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649094142103217,0.1588067878650409,0.09408359493067568,0.0,0.1324022423986471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097974071156087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315096796029854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18381921874390544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19351439061188108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842756684209608,0.10605299325802606,0.0,0.0,0.17773442769938871,0.1875313230594653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314808096157576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220523275310095,0.138403851185204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18108043193488416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123948530849093,0.0,0.0,0.17233920253481724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731855402686638,0.1952866152422881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheStupidWanker,2020/01/11,"I feel like shit because I have nothing better to do As the title says I've been feeling like shit recently. I've tried to do something to make my self happy and since my usual go to for making my self happy (Steven Universe) is on hiatus I have been trying to draw so I can get my ideas for shit down on paper but then what I draw is shit, so I look up some guides and try them and its still shit. This repeats until I have given up on everything and I end up ranting about it on r/mentalheath. It's 2:57 in the morning so thanks for reading this incoherent rant",3.6274576271186447,4.267634584745768,4.862500000000002,86.47222457627122,71.79661016949153,7.255932203389831,25.76694915254237,7.1686216300943375,1.071115254237288,443,13,94,4,8,147,73,118,0.16699999999999998,0.721,0.113,-0.8377,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,5,11,5,0,2,0,10,5,5,2,0,11,19,11,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,6,4,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,5,0,0,3,4,13,6,20,16,1,17,0,0,1,0,4,9,5,1,9,62,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004119539078493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612698605005688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162956382018846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800682518194995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13278165871328687,0.1876060256832396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860048841845054,0.0,0.07462261895138225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795493379102494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482252997472121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829619564340444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026159555316367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752917747806184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598893551091964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313387052440702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964604254872136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441755308691847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27395569065309217,0.0,0.6739040997055301,0.10861534134071227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108359726846412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485888336200082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088632032209005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26743870597308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461189440143835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iron-valley,2020/01/11,"How do I heal Hey all,

So a few years ago, I fell way too deeply in love with a girl who I thought loved me back, and maybe for awhile she did, but towards the end she became distant and suddenly broke it off, telling me she didn't feel the same. Which is totally okay! But at the time, I was super immature and it was so hard for me to deal with the sudden rejection. That was an issue on my end -- not hers -- but the point is that the pain of feeling so lied to was almost intolerable and I truly felt like discarded trash. As you can tell... I'm overly-dramatic.

Eventually, as the pain faded, I began to become overproductive, spending the next year climbing to incredible heights in my career and creative life. It felt like I was using all this bad stuff for something good, and to an extent I was. But that didn't change the fact that the real reason I was doing it was because I wanted to run from my feelings. Eventually, I was in so deep that it wasn't just a habit but a necessity to continue all the work that I had begun. Which, honestly, has been a great thing.

But relationships didn't really happen, except for one girl who I ended it with because I didn't feel the same for her (poetic, in a sense). I longed a lot, I still do. But deep down there's that subconscious part of me that tells me I'm not good enough. And it's because of what happened a few years ago and a childhood of feeling like a disappointment and living in the shadow of others. These are things I desperately want to grow beyond.

Cut to now, and incredibly there's a girl who I've known for awhile who somehow I've caught those same feelings for. All the walls I built around my heart just crumbled with her -- she is so sweet and warm and that intuitive part of me just feels good around her, and I think she likes me too. But now that those walls are down, that wound from my first ex came gushing open. And I don't want to run this time and just not process it. I want to heal so that I have a healthy chance with this girl I like so much. I have to heal if I can ever truly be a good partner for anyone, which is seriously something that I have always wanted to be.

So... How? How do I heal? How do I move through this? I cannot let this cycle repeat again. I have to grow.",3.4720779220779217,4.43434343722944,4.479523809523811,87.88214285714287,72.4199134199134,7.591341991341991,24.17316017316017,7.898369717300924,1.009414718614719,1756,47,387,23,33,572,204,462,0.091,0.732,0.177,0.9909,0,0,2,1,0,0,61.0,0,1,0,4,30,25,1,0,29,1,40,11,1,6,7,78,66,38,0,6,17,1,11,5,1,0,8,0,0,5,41,24,0,0,13,0,1,9,10,8,0,2,23,12,52,17,53,40,16,58,0,3,0,2,28,21,0,4,32,286,93,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909325810438646,0.0,0.0898588610066966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466855382036372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274634910615813,0.0,0.0,0.15977029828596434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900238125911384,0.07492682844873222,0.16410892498728435,0.0991077066483292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263547077481974,0.0,0.0,0.0949300775902292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925151310949146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384416183796613,0.09272253414865356,0.0,0.0,0.0811724509572495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176168349759202,0.06410828625121935,0.1723236033231365,0.0,0.0,0.07633043152857306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.301069282594408,0.0,0.09893559930827812,0.0,0.0,0.15870865049088098,0.0,0.08038692086830987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633903503571487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366234081185053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176238497503056,0.06338405070236419,0.2192053588176567,0.0,0.07923960728619206,0.07941461379398075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762913734505016,0.16198268508817348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015309667586946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537646083092136,0.06596718030198362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543654906452707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608082611271696,0.0,0.19097345314222625,0.0,0.0,0.19435332387000634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483067635328766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021405997133837,0.05748795950781339,0.09226480550233936,0.0,0.09634418858756334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13816818868987127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166425796903314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027276448188506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353028507786343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192348400113128,0.05749998566852922,0.0,0.07124132710486311,0.1046529865703799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750414389206957,0.0,0.0,0.2646466800364676,0.07122922648214347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06532976324662369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17336347813481465
mentalhealth,jager525,2020/01/11,"Not sure what to do anymore *warning* Self harm and suicidal thoughts are stated. I have been depressed in one way or another since my dad passed about 10 years ago when I was really young. He was one of the only people that I could truly be myself with, and is the reason i'm going into the work field I am headed into.

Since then it seems like everything has gone down hill, I had to repeat school so many times until I just dropped out. My relationship with my mom was never good but it has gotten a lot worse recently, which really sucks because I still live at home. I work full-time in retail in a deceptively terrible store.

My depression really wasn't that bad until more recently, I'm not sure what really had me slip down the rabbit hole but it has been quite a fall. Though it probably has a lot to do with the person who I met about 4 years ago. She helped me with how I was feeling, and even set me up with the person I am training with to get my ratings for the field I want to go into. She really hasn't wanted anything to do with me for months, but I had started to slip before that.

I had recently started to do self harm in the form of cutting, I have done it in places I normally get cuts from working on my truck so no one that I know of has noticed as of yet. Suicide has been getting into my head more and more, Though more like assisted suicide. I have looked into the deadliest jobs, and what insurance company's will cover what. The money from that could pull at least two of my close family's out of their financial troubles.",5.16530855893728,5.321432102236424,6.06540776862284,80.9180443921305,68.2332268370607,9.528770808811164,27.97528165461577,9.414487439383343,2.212562939297124,1220,36,247,23,19,404,167,313,0.179,0.778,0.043,-0.9938,1,0,0,0,0,2,26.0,0,0,1,4,12,15,3,0,14,0,35,2,2,2,3,43,55,19,3,5,7,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,4,16,20,0,0,5,0,3,6,6,10,0,4,17,2,34,5,48,34,8,50,0,2,1,0,14,20,1,4,22,183,50,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653786267065376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850048283814032,0.0,0.0,0.0931596455574726,0.0,0.0,0.07730163522841363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843295193788326,0.057262744166964474,0.0,0.07993293897048558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500011083838473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16181452951826406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09612952874829664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062044091760034635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084423959529316,0.0,0.08855485709212449,0.0,0.04749705520914492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14723364133390235,0.0,0.10677241680910313,0.07878937711829623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19281164902857556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296357410603645,0.0,0.094225846277766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321736058332927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05162497672201323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178513880077427,0.0,0.0829475428031387,0.0,0.07888289907185758,0.0,0.0,0.15972269882509735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523674343455704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001715064108952,0.07497912074583797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244952573810759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203770589721263,0.0,0.10694718900413697,0.0,0.0,0.1909611625564907,0.07144284843438067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512365683958092,0.1640432440182351,0.09814352171241927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127930339733916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991290090237556,0.0,0.0,0.3008902457527948,0.09658224170631603,0.27825252223487634,0.1008525153063592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506862959988922,0.0,0.08551615056357126,0.19599225811610205,0.0,0.0,0.1554102852521062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329773037285405,0.0,0.07501771284494227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082534532524536,0.0,0.17706784922179095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845840289656109,0.07457499136814583,0.05477505745119681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176219185505224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108122191507058,0.07456232450929384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20516040596894214,0.0,0.0957291944315823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098389526466305
mentalhealth,Magdalene-3110,2020/01/11,"Any advice on how to break the thought pattern of anxiety? I started getting panic attacks this year and have been prescribed medication. I don’t want to use it yet as I’ve researched the side effects and tolerance buildup.

What I find is that I’m anxious about the feeling of the panic attack coming up again not so much the situation. 

Any tips on what’s worked for you?",5.329583333333332,6.562238347222222,5.759333333333338,79.419,68.30555555555556,7.982222222222222,35.23333333333333,8.238735603445708,2.857263333333333,299,15,54,4,5,96,57,72,0.215,0.721,0.064,-0.9129,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,2,5,4,2,2,5,0,4,1,0,3,0,11,12,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,2,1,4,0,10,10,1,10,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,36,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20181923096101054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2808956676462358,0.0,0.15799528023976964,0.2333206976852567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4699165577020994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17790775297164166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442803496514123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887651509624173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790367092275023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20805776780942928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518236937331963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4846381245306498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23214895444689684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14618336297047488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16396216085030926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17837605535747472,0.0,0.0,0.1218170499737296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15035667617461235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13299888160734533
mentalhealth,caamstar,2020/01/11,"Should I suppress my emotions? I’m at the point where I’m scared to show my emotions. My dad used to be there to support me. I’ve been admitted to the hospital twice within reason.
Over the summer my dad and I got into an argument, and he got to the point where he thought he should call the cops and admit me to the hospital. 
Every time I cry now or try to share my feelings he calls me crazy. He threatens to send me to the hospital, and he knows I HATE it. He says he doesn’t want to deal with my insanity, and I just want to be able to reach out to him. He says he hasn’t given up on me, but I can’t tell. 
Anyways, I’m so scared to share my feelings. He began recording me when I was crying and asking for help. I was crying earlier today, as I just moved back from being gone for a couple months. The transition back into my old school and people has been so hard. 

I don’t know what to do with this. Any tips on how I could deal with my emotions and hide them? I’m a really sensitive person and don’t have any friends to go to.",2.0511685214626425,3.095669824324325,3.85429252782194,90.6884022257552,75.98198198198196,7.025331213566508,22.51828298887123,7.510576382923642,0.6819488076311613,799,21,185,10,17,270,114,222,0.13699999999999998,0.7759999999999999,0.087,-0.9228,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,0,13,7,1,2,11,0,18,0,0,3,0,35,41,16,0,5,4,2,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,1,3,15,0,1,8,1,0,4,5,3,0,1,10,5,28,4,33,25,0,27,0,0,0,0,31,13,0,1,10,118,31,1,0.11909750603013858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16198077625599286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134009115664163,0.0,0.0,0.18315726137371816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432237391124377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508966751279883,0.1317791251515799,0.3924690539581809,0.0,0.24556859832626435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4019059925935191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034478546370727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043855505699695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201443772474772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768585728003126,0.0,0.1905063106730624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668797226878864,0.11758413037193055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07982854782431993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090574929060556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506249305677114,0.12658180084909726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497279822171012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256721490679599,0.10399134846056006,0.0,0.0,0.2251712778288536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629691202884095,0.1224520718606014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894222340380708,0.238474760528161,0.12053303441488915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515043847370165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409646970541088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455011646741204,0.06944671352294668,0.0,0.11289051001071068,0.0,0.0,0.08085938882884709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286200621888768,0.0,0.0,0.1404935895331116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sooo_nohug,2020/01/11,"My therapist said something that kind of disturbs me For reference I’m 16F and I’ve always had a problem with anxiety and such. I have a world in my head with a group of people that I’ve created to be my friends (that’s the bluntest way I can describe it) and my therapist knows this. Today we were talking about if my family knew about this world but she said “does your sister know about your personalities?” This kind of disturbed me and I had to take a second to process what she said, it threw me off a bit from what I was thinking. She said that I described completely different personalities in each of them so aren’t they personalities? I know they’re personalities but I’ve never referred to them as that, they’ve always been my friend group and family you know? I kind of say they’re people, and whenever I talk about them with people I say things like they’re real but not physically here, they’re not really just a creation in my head like I didn’t think “this is what she looks like and this is her name this is how she acts” like it just kind of cake to me like “I know her name and that’s how she acts I can’t control her she’s her own person”. I don’t really know why this disturbed me but I needed to get it off my chest or else I’d be thinking about it until I see her again and I’d have no one to talk to about it because she’s really the only one who knows, cares and understands it.",1.8818594622019305,3.8148742534246582,3.458599695585998,89.52851090816843,78.72602739726028,6.928665651953324,21.4312531709792,7.921354282810032,0.8256000507356673,1110,31,245,19,27,367,127,292,0.065,0.8340000000000001,0.10099999999999999,0.9069,2,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,1,3,4,1,14,16,0,3,8,0,17,3,3,3,1,48,41,21,0,3,10,1,0,5,2,0,0,6,0,5,25,15,0,1,14,0,0,3,8,4,0,3,12,8,49,12,32,27,3,15,0,0,2,0,43,7,0,2,9,164,74,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456537491475893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695552405989214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335374123374629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555340194231432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892364227211091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176711669580016,0.0,0.09816546701652083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144381984113634,0.0,0.0,0.07659273196555873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311496592327882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501943799648866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524145590689038,0.0,0.04572761175938162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17964949076012576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36457058500984013,0.3367058254901892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21379871921616614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349801072362264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489784357288167,0.06750380731785917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186168843396346,0.06656585016700511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18203410188044167,0.3821123541937469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837485270772235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962133004630523,0.16821010461717753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3330209878238973,0.13920499513933562,0.0,0.0,0.06974519583765604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673801542481557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06580706078052709,0.2110451237691597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20324392727227972,0.058146972815497126,0.16824529323353254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296239867047317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911154395472588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947237729397082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897668283290682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Akuahealth,2020/01/11,"How Millennial's Are Changing The Face Of Mental Health Millennials  are considered “the therapy generation” in the mental health and  substance abuse realm. This generation is changing the way people look  and talk about mental health.

Depression  and anxiety are two of the most commonly seen mental health disorders  among millennials.  Since 2013, millennials have seen a 47% increase in  major-depression diagnoses.

Here are few reasons on [How Mental Health affecting the Millennial Generation](https://www.akuamindbody.com/blog/how-millennials-are-changing-the-face-of-mental-health/)  
• **Millennials are Financially Stressed**

• **Workplace Burnout and Mental Health**

• **Financial Stress and The Link Between Anxiety and Depression**

• **Millennials Are Lonely**

• **Social Media Breed Loneliness**

• **The Link Between Loneliness and Mental Health**

• **Multidimensional Perfectionism Among Millennials**

• **Increase in Mental Health Treatment Among Millennials**

  
Read a in-depth analysis on the topic [Mental Health in The Millennial Generation](https://www.akuamindbody.com/blog/how-millennials-are-changing-the-face-of-mental-health/) by Kristen Fuller.",8.631923076923076,9.992788858974365,6.98641025641026,50.3169230769231,128.35897435897436,9.917948717948716,35.692307692307686,7.748469712250963,6.155638461538462,946,51,92,34,52,283,73,156,0.11699999999999999,0.851,0.032,-0.9062,0,2,0,0,1,0,81.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,2,12,0,8,11,1,4,0,14,11,9,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,5,0,1,2,3,0,0,15,9,4,13,0,3,3,0,2,9,0,1,1,49,1,2,0.0,0.06950466783784652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975226810642344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411286097043354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15157602665227835,0.059540515553420624,0.0,0.0,0.0672315314139849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6859025220300439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04926115698724613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6502905222644733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040668721876408034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05867769775207241,0.0,0.0,0.060314124187309075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048525666204679116,0.0,0.0,0.059798341121157714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13439384016570546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715015128086967,0.0,0.0,0.0670849070629754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057304077203701585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0465630246378294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,malignantlove,2020/01/11,Should i force my friend to go to a psychiatrist? Her mental health is rapidly declining and i really dk what to do. She refuses to go seek medical attention but at this point its a necessity. She hasn't slept in like two weeks because she can't. She's in the same class and me and the way she has been acting has been very concerning. She once told me to shut up even though I didn't say anything? She also took someone else’s school bag and was convinced that it was her own. She stands outside the school lockers for like a very long time and she once went to the class beside ours and said she couldn't find the class. She has also been skipping classes. I honestly don't know how to help her. I hope that she hasn't developed any serious mental health issues but it isn't looking too good,3.251251791686573,4.891315204968947,4.044968944099382,88.1205160057334,73.96894409937889,7.686765408504539,24.806975633062592,8.384062270229773,1.427633158146202,632,20,133,11,13,202,97,161,0.052000000000000005,0.8320000000000001,0.11599999999999999,0.8835,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,8,0,18,4,1,1,0,17,28,12,0,3,2,0,0,2,1,1,3,2,0,0,7,6,0,1,3,0,0,5,7,1,0,1,11,3,24,7,12,15,2,16,0,0,1,0,22,6,0,1,5,86,31,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23854645450154574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142543607323487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273571043264532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091895101427122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12459362457949105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851053807354708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631814197935888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523101304955954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952795879354038,0.1250978733707979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170737035833545,0.0,0.0,0.0999704466334804,0.0,0.0,0.14813715213334608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155671273396272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196758290199888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14573190055533547,0.0,0.0,0.1319908721950068,0.1252463628998678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025044711669835,0.30061126424976004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176745073186462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409926262414368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955477279765182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418734571303798,0.118608103587026,0.0,0.3018905294648027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637221964530854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465366926758553,0.0,0.08696912517305319,0.0,0.0,0.1425168581591829,0.1657083956178326,0.0,0.0,0.14569546653065885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461246673651339,0.0,0.11838636845283496,0.11963715352522435,0.0,0.0,0.13826125617258034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrCld,2020/01/11,"I want to leave an never talk to my parents ever again I feel stuck. I just want to go away and never come back, never talk to them again a finally be who I f**cking want to be. 

I’m an adult but I still have to live with my parents to be able to afford university. I can’t do what I want because I get judge for f**cking everything. They are loud and I hate it. My dad treats me like a child because he’s paying, like it’s not my bedroom because it’s in HIS house, I can’t just watch tv because it’s HIS tv that’s in HIS house. I’m so tired of it that I started to buy everything I want to use on my own, and even then I get comments/ get laugh at about it. I get comments about the time I go to bed or eat diner even if I’m 24!!!
I can express anything about my mental health (I have OCD) because « I should just get over it ». I can express anything about my sexuality (i believe I might be asexual) because god knows what they think about the lgbtq+ community. I can’t just vent to my friends because they love my parents and I don’t want to be a weight for my little sister.


I just feel trapped all the time but I have to choose between staying in my prison and being able to go to uni, or leaving and maybe never having my degree. Is there a way to cope?",1.372116155944166,2.799150180811811,3.2435937750681876,92.79373335472486,78.55719557195572,5.746253810364191,23.95973046686989,6.280692351149826,0.4472292956842616,973,33,226,7,23,327,127,271,0.081,0.7979999999999999,0.121,0.7823,4,1,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,4,0,19,7,1,0,9,0,21,6,0,1,6,39,48,13,0,8,11,5,3,2,1,2,2,1,2,2,12,8,3,0,5,2,2,4,9,1,0,0,1,5,45,6,34,39,2,28,0,0,1,1,24,8,0,4,16,154,57,1,0.19012060836349695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564530613574764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931228497261387,0.0730955061933693,0.0,0.4056351537794496,0.0,0.0,0.1071004102648225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188603483800558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727042300888418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557286875392792,0.0859874874375139,0.0,0.0,0.17086814374951534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961306920736959,0.0,0.0,0.10413391672014567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734433552035388,0.0,0.2483254273279882,0.0,0.1620748845961716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938523699839148,0.0,0.10104465812497204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21937365596997616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052242657136563515,0.0,0.0,0.2013102730082007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288332588353657,0.09527539802807722,0.08393999017799095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857956359260958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550085252386936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957984281930444,0.10084396048153096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2932654674673129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3166596544958673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728417257254207,0.1013216360818102,0.07591528171394518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15281174336193076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06091080455281379,0.0,0.0,0.11086085564618728,0.10925783572126184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210158151790302,0.0,0.0,0.33641418200370093,0.07545444476652381,0.0,0.11575784109831952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,supmynameistom,2020/01/11,"Im in a position where i cant get mental health help. When i (14M) was around 10 my dad cheated on my mum and ever since then it has escalated to him accusing my mum of emotional abuse and i have chosen not to see him for a variety of reasons that have affected me (i am legally not allowed to leave england, he has harassed me and followed me home from school, made my family go on food parcels and many other things). I am in a position where if i get help for mental health issues that i want help for things im stuggling with like self harm, feeling depressed and being told i may have borderline personality disorder by an 2 online councillors and suicidal thoughts, my dad will instantly say that these are a result of my mum abusing me, which is not true. The same thing happened when my brother tried to get help for his aspergers, but my dad said this was a result of abuse.

Just looking for general advice and help :)
And sorry for formatting im on mobile

Tldr: i want mental health help hut cant get it because my dad is trying to frame my mum for problems mainly he has cause",6.256321044546852,5.838572262672818,7.068951612903228,76.59009408602155,66.00460829493089,10.366973886328728,33.75153609831029,9.928628108626363,3.180054070660524,859,34,167,17,12,287,123,217,0.14300000000000002,0.737,0.12,-0.8147,2,0,0,0,2,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,2,0,7,0,18,4,0,7,2,33,34,13,1,4,6,9,1,1,0,2,3,2,1,2,12,10,1,0,3,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,6,5,26,2,25,25,2,14,0,1,2,0,25,8,0,2,5,110,38,2,0.0,0.3572431235704523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821154002422533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947004519503587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06126642683502648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324549747969074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656411928730391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518651927469885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305369632589865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091180192626516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474641412750996,0.0,0.05081794280353557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12153007631327645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21003718317879885,0.0,0.05711885238472182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887553121323617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3204937910939695,0.0,0.0,0.40419507612051,0.0,0.10081390616057208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3256853444265913,0.10490027189547148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064194350296802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491012749448756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439821449054619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509950313846012,0.0,0.10189548297976343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038537811119019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775638989741041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616894500872604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033350554735828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560250843354226,0.07992497294997544,0.0,0.1017156150027486,0.08008883424241757,0.0,0.10484779865849668,0.0,0.0,0.08313811195501335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250622232705164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993528116215696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20031157178303013,0.0,0.0,0.07978910754010132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960360691116737,0.0,0.1364715076393462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855996103205145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,momsdads4mh,2020/01/11,"How do I help? My son is having strong intrusive thoughts. Most are sexual and have involved his female cousin. I know these are just thoughts and not how he truly feels. However he has lost his appetite, lost his happy attitude, and is basically feeling tortured 24/7. He is seeing a therapist but can’t get on medicine until his doctor reads the therapist recommendation. How can I help him on a daily basis? He tells me his thoughts and I listen but I don’t know what else to do.",2.7779347826086958,5.461262663043481,4.030608695652177,82.55134782608697,79.97826086956522,7.1582608695652175,25.50434782608696,8.238735603445708,1.9724791304347828,383,15,70,8,10,125,61,92,0.079,0.797,0.124,0.6378,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,4,5,1,0,3,0,13,1,0,3,0,19,25,10,0,0,4,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,7,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,4,13,2,4,20,1,3,0,2,1,0,17,2,0,1,1,47,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20304919161271684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657201003686591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20061264656984426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364477798342338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21117800857616129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26593836572159746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21804769082432815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4331079674908589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984325659989143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580822846389124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17339188664541255,0.0,0.0,0.4606663437718827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4724720191728817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,19931,2020/01/11,"Never going to get better I just feel like I'm never going to get better. my suicidal thoughts will always come back. They're here at the minute telling me different ways i should do it. But I don't want to I just want them to go away which probably means dying tbh.

I tried to kill myself on the 7th december and apart from doctors helping me get physically better and the psychiatrist visiting and sign posting things thats all i've had. Who the fuck knows when or if the NHS will offer me support because they're shit. I thought mentioning my suicide attempt in my referral would have gotten them to contact me quickly but apparently not. It's only been a couple weeks but it feels like a couple weeks too long.

I had extensions for my uni work and i barely got most of it done in time because of my brain not letting me concentrate and plaguing me with flashbacks of hospital. My essay was due on wednesday. It's now saturday I haven't even started it and I don't know how to. I didn't do any of the reading last semester because of my depression so I have no clue.

There's so much more I want to say but I'm just going to end it here.",2.527775041050901,4.533557327586209,4.078916256157637,85.49580459770117,77.01724137931033,7.177668308702793,26.564860426929393,8.11559375814309,1.7680670771756972,908,36,181,16,21,302,137,232,0.109,0.8270000000000001,0.063,-0.8866,2,0,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,2,5,15,10,3,0,8,0,18,4,2,1,3,37,43,16,4,6,11,0,2,2,0,4,1,1,0,0,11,8,0,0,7,1,0,6,9,4,0,0,10,3,29,6,23,28,4,31,0,1,0,1,10,7,2,3,18,125,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768286234803107,0.0,0.0,0.07983329419817692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029739057624434,0.09027026459406444,0.0,0.2146905050308388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114816209462335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105274233929434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011262445030592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25979284481951553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111298823516042,0.0,0.1218384960382177,0.12265381589414052,0.0,0.12015976321221256,0.0,0.12013684974167835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397799606626404,0.0,0.0,0.07753893965974804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871787283539252,0.16773542758874682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853069469639476,0.18400366751162936,0.0,0.2668753703835955,0.0,0.09389229202443213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868805288104531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988126165509106,0.0,0.12903552429991588,0.09569339487208596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004534655656307,0.0,0.11470749489992794,0.0,0.0,0.1038917508208636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787864142427915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629955534466283,0.0,0.18108603882257396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928493522476336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243290057739044,0.0,0.12657272549464765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742775213554688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335799770300053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050528964221338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309348108279514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568243027780348,0.13321957043386434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260926368015497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799267474722492,0.0,0.0,0.18639859466991607,0.06845454182800031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970416646054691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20772957739927814,0.09318346706367288,0.18833595287705374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546567388732526,0.0,0.0,0.08339473814978146,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,5SOSsavedme,2020/01/11,"I have few friends. So I'm in middle school right now, and have been going through depression for around 3 years now. And I know every year it gets worse. I self harm, and have suicidal thoughts. I have tried talking to my parents but since they are divorced, I can really only do so much. My mom struggles with depression, and I worry about my brother. He is older then me, but I still worry about him alot. I have talked to him about my depression, but since he is so young(he is turning 18 this year) all he can really do is listen to me and encourage me to go to the counselors at my school. I spoke to him last night, after relapsing and he told me to see a councelor before school starts. And I did intend on doing so. But I got anxious since I have never done it before, and just went to class instead. I don't know what to do, since my father doesn't understand, and I feel like I would make my mom question herslef about how good of a mother she has been. Which she has been a wonderful mother. I feel like suicide would be a nice way out, but I have three wonderful friends, and three wonderful cats, and two budgies, and a brother. I would leave behind my brother to live in this world without his little sister, which to me doesnt seem bad. But I worry I'm wrong and I would just ruin my family's lives forever. I truly am not sure what to do anymore. Please, if you have any advice, comment. I hope you people have a wonderful day.",3.416219435736674,4.744135186206896,4.321253918495302,87.55959247648904,73.0,7.341692789968652,25.595611285266447,7.84624498591911,1.3239310344827584,1124,36,232,15,22,363,153,290,0.166,0.659,0.175,0.6991,1,0,0,0,1,1,38.0,0,2,1,0,16,17,0,1,8,0,37,0,0,3,3,51,63,26,2,6,11,10,2,2,2,4,0,2,0,1,8,16,0,0,12,0,0,3,6,8,0,3,10,5,45,9,29,48,4,28,0,4,1,0,35,10,0,9,16,167,53,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464319914187021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05890397020505491,0.0,0.0,0.09785494763830802,0.08590288932186453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771093789060588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232334504053575,0.0,0.0,0.1474129784084863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055862164975187936,0.0,0.223814756969554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864143073122219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298034235674508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165679508736721,0.0,0.08759445685586091,0.12376142971744385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13384343064531756,0.0,0.045254913828393487,0.0,0.09845528124215426,0.07265200615384636,0.0692772210822507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603232811563892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520720339922356,0.07060614167283889,0.0,0.09171713863320603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463545103261118,0.08681511140684879,0.1529725353998428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578189335485071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028945270986024,0.0,0.0,0.06367501789557359,0.0,0.06680600332536384,0.0,0.0,0.08128617404616233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587774207568425,0.0,0.0,0.09618027931691783,0.0,0.0,0.0600507897196145,0.0,0.0,0.09508177979664706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703323533105017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098084937639678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397225307742412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629895138919046,0.0690242220430415,0.07885479139744445,0.09036263049381754,0.0,0.0,0.28660891641660424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06130945720196813,0.0,0.0691741391364877,0.0,0.0,0.09055310865147964,0.0,0.1894945114154744,0.0,0.08163749316100749,0.0,0.0,0.13924233116644938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876590385613561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276827876455982,0.0,0.05880869496323509,0.09421672654858153,0.08461429156032206,0.0901735561184522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06875422369389897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029678973450614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349773827227275,0.3757389520754096,0.0,0.2638977552799158,0.08827228082414962,0.24612694342983835,0.09470440730377357,0.0,0.1673396152774664
mentalhealth,horribly_skipped,2020/01/11,"I feel nothing until I do something embarrassing, and then I become worried and sad. I’m in high school and I have what I think are friends, but I don’t really feel anything towards them of from them. I don’t really feel anything at all most of the time except some anxiety. It doesn’t really interfere with my life it just makes nothing feel special anymore. Everything seems to be going ok for a while with nothing bad happening except for the feeling of nothingness and then out of nowhere I accidentally do something embarrassing at school such as causing my team to lose in gym because I’m not athletic, and then I worry for a while with my heart feeling like it could explode out of my chest and I feel like I’m going to throw up. After the worrying is over I feel sad. I don’t want to be too quick to diagnose myself with anything cause I don’t want to be that person but I was wondering if anyone has gone through anything similar and if they would have a clue as to what it is. Thank you for your time.",4.6009688826025466,5.638888262376241,5.634172560113154,80.36722772277228,69.84158415841584,8.939745403111743,31.26025459688826,9.23628265651192,2.7116650636492228,807,34,157,16,14,267,106,202,0.134,0.737,0.129,-0.4781,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,3,2,4,12,0,2,6,1,19,4,2,3,1,43,41,19,0,6,8,0,8,2,1,1,2,0,0,1,7,13,0,1,11,2,0,4,7,6,0,0,2,8,24,6,37,34,3,24,0,3,0,0,8,10,0,6,12,118,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364998525386746,0.0,0.10844262061540684,0.07645780904936451,0.0,0.3599323227074266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912999915344146,0.06665678045398198,0.12076492446466025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246585222571328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730450395673114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098467711469123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827383261607647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4423121283961289,0.15623471894388427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448104880938162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242885867473215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669499394446196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957645745250895,0.0,0.11553087365424927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723486249658114,0.10684262403042634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12233107385149042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729898228649253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31476354543359764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954773881391348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21015103635350552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221329552521048,0.0,0.09954519917461736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683609825597001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067182123228254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006499959300634,0.0,0.0,0.12752197024413836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899112452610026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858191543963945,0.0,0.3331408801612151,0.0,0.07767681320236512,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anxiousballoflove,2020/01/11,"The general misuse of narcissist. I get really tired of seeing posts, not so much here but a lot all over the subs /social media about people labeling someone as a narcissist. Just because someone is a shitty person, doesn't mean they are a narcissist. Just because that person is a selfish, self-centered twat, doesn't mean they are a narcissist. Just because a person hurts you, doesn't mean they are a narcissist. Stop it. 95% of the time, it's just a really crappy someone is dealing with. A person can be abusive and not be a narcissist. I guess it really upsets me because I've actually dealt with one and he destroyed my life, I've been away from him for going on nine years and the damage he wrought is still there. He is actually diagnosed as a narcissist with sociopathic tendencies. He is a monster. I'm still afraid to get a divorce because that will bring me back under his radar and he will do everything he can to screw my life up again because he simply likes to do it. It's fun for him. Plus I'm the evil witch that left him so I must pay for hurting his ego. I get it, whomever it is you're talking about is a really awful person, but please, don't throw this label around.

End rant.",3.3548734177215214,5.246592620253168,4.764833333333336,82.00725000000001,74.2742616033755,7.946751054852321,27.03987341772152,8.697196308434329,2.1441681012658225,949,36,180,19,20,316,122,237,0.268,0.691,0.040999999999999995,-0.9964,0,0,0,0,1,0,29.0,0,1,3,0,15,12,3,2,20,1,25,5,0,0,2,26,37,11,0,1,8,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,5,11,9,0,1,3,0,1,3,6,10,0,2,1,1,17,2,24,31,3,19,0,3,1,1,25,7,1,2,9,122,28,1,0.0,0.12328629350750556,0.2030822655368553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262960872529986,0.0,0.0,0.09776161787761208,0.08001066087647382,0.0,0.3805800120043253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072745120517134,0.0,0.10561203591725052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216044972599097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935165088532844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309085951508834,0.0,0.059135959255428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462657856116812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227826867760714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130543505577566,0.0,0.14699202239645182,0.050835247441112834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846250082336497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34003405191131875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764912398066275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705092936034207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07213754324425098,0.4542771852647395,0.0,0.11421941383030006,0.0,0.0,0.09965441798480544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666371536012806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291710776460129,0.0,0.10855041532922376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060693628796918,0.2644923876325603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619439899596544,0.08699332238009505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363420142224351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060674388806595585,0.11959410499005972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670069940790561
mentalhealth,umuwunu,2020/01/11,"Is having multiple mental/nervous breakdowns a day normal? I have a mental/nervous breakdown almost once every hour usually because of school. It's usually when people say the smallest thing that kind of hurts my feelings causing me to spiral or it's when I have such a large workload, I look at the time and just start hyperventilating and crying and then try to force myself to work and go back to having a mental breakdown. I just don't want to exist sometimes and by sometimes like almost every single second of school. Is this my just being overwhelmed by stress or is this something else?",7.0655064935064935,8.080807109090909,6.9512987012987,73.21409090909094,64.27272727272727,7.740259740259741,32.077922077922075,7.447530270364453,2.3786103896103894,482,18,74,4,7,153,71,110,0.10300000000000001,0.862,0.035,-0.8006,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,2,6,0,9,0,0,1,0,16,14,10,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,0,3,8,2,11,13,1,12,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,4,11,57,14,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.296423717684159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381149367318355,0.0,0.09022626725381476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15204829675214418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16258337749926385,0.09545499364677602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364438375082075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494116767259861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748389211766391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411818848800141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14576123926250065,0.0,0.15844907459054053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413091132572748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231080682424572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429214905699848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4474814980561408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501957198378052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762712106388604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261234511257676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770446461740815,0.0,0.2995905175875974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394627001249714,0.2927737667573195,0.0,0.10476310487251153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954635493582734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833207921196352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630653393111262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048990415219597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260269007388362,0.0,0.08730085368357123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775393255622813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ithinkineedhelp99,2020/01/11,"I think I may need help but I'm not quite sure if I really do. Some advice would be appreciated. Hi. It's incredibly hard for me to make this post, hence not wanting it on my main account, hence the throwaway.

I think my mental health is suffering and I need advice on if I actually do need help or if this is all in my head.

I think it all started a little over a year ago. My grandfather passed away from brain, lung, and pancreatic cancer. We had about two months between finding out, and his death. That summer was hard, but I still felt like myself.

In september of that same year, my cousin passed away suddenly. It was a shock to everyone. I took two weeks off from college, returned, but my motivation was down the drain. My GPA suffered a bit, but not that much. 

Since then I've felt my motivation decline. At my summer job that I really enjoyed, I wanted to do anything but work. When College started up again it got better, but nowhere near where I used to be. Now, I just want to lay in bed all day and do nothing.

And just when I think I'm having a good day, it all comes to a halt for no reason. I feel sad without warning, I want to cry for no reason at all. 

It just all feels like it's getting worse. I'm a very prideful person, so getting help isn't exactly easy for me, but I keep thinking I may need it. 

Cost isn't a factor, we have a councelling centre on campus that's free, I just don't want to take away from someone who may need it more than me.

Anyways, any advice would be appreciated. Thanks",2.452987303958178,4.106365407766994,3.9382038834951447,87.9954163554892,76.15210355987055,6.695593726661688,24.182350012447106,7.468242284971852,0.979648145382126,1177,38,252,15,26,390,161,309,0.147,0.6859999999999999,0.16699999999999998,0.6171,1,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,2,0,0,6,13,13,0,0,11,0,23,5,3,6,8,71,57,20,1,15,19,1,6,2,0,5,2,0,1,1,18,9,0,2,14,0,3,4,9,4,0,2,8,6,35,10,37,41,12,43,0,3,0,0,10,19,0,8,21,171,53,8,0.0,0.0,0.0916337472456114,0.0,0.0,0.27527666083354563,0.08323749510483902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385584190372441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727245181050303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26466900078855216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304772815580791,0.10251547858126596,0.0,0.0,0.10482447555143748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088732334249828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031457454023269,0.12111664333108925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972634790209037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949582476216596,0.06708283212748363,0.18031920722431066,0.0,0.08582373475385513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981187044857148,0.0,0.0,0.07875963203835627,0.07510113938937743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16823355086181468,0.0,0.09636942875813716,0.0998122811778082,0.0,0.0,0.18881941105965336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931821685568943,0.08346344735172742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175048747605534,0.094113385049455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06267958962464938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946300361506504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495081413875485,0.0,0.06902797658293734,0.34813169167867736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010046004673128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199065667098822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993111954299086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998751811318548,0.0,0.0,0.12031066068127415,0.1930915586959911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776758068733959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956194019088911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292710126884005,0.0,0.07498939166831796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885005007057795,0.0,0.0706018016398297,0.0,0.0,0.08645134614565271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008395725023218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432737114437184,0.0,0.0,0.18345509838682805,0.0,0.0,0.08110024113766028,0.0,0.077478088615397,0.2769259614960392,0.0,0.0753216496481431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051713077865252,0.0,0.06836098415777182,0.0,0.09569305412123716,0.13340903111615673,0.0,0.0,0.12093822063481173
mentalhealth,linkrddt,2020/01/11,"i can't enjoy anything anymore I think my brain is really messed up.
Everytime I try to enjoy a situation or want to do an important step in my life, my brain gives me the worst things I could imagine at the moment and then it starts to connect the negative thoughts with the things I like. So I am not able to feel joy anymore, only in really rare moments. Then when I will think back to the situation for example a concert the primary memory isn’t the concert itself, it is the worst negative thought I could have at that moment and it will stuck in my head for maybe weeks or months.
Or another example is when I wanted to tell my parents what I do want to study this year I was really scared of my thoughts and the things around me, cause I knew whatever happens I can’t forget it anymore and my whole career I will have that in mind, and guess what I completely failed there and now I start to think of a different job I could do just to escape from that thoughts. I mean that’s crazy and I know that but repeating things can fix it for me.  I know that I can’t live this way and I really wanna change things in my life, but even in this moment where I’m writing here on Reddit my brain pushes negative thoughts into my mind and in the moment I’m gonna post this, I have to be sure that my brain is free of them, otherwise the thoughts are connected to this post.",5.503964285714287,5.208919039285714,6.1535714285714285,82.11392857142859,67.53571428571429,10.142857142857146,30.0,9.827888789773867,2.5065357142857136,1081,35,230,22,16,354,133,280,0.10800000000000001,0.83,0.061,-0.8949,3,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,12,11,0,1,15,0,25,7,5,1,1,48,51,19,0,7,7,1,1,1,0,4,2,2,0,0,25,12,0,0,15,2,1,2,8,5,0,0,9,3,38,7,33,34,3,36,0,1,0,0,5,14,0,4,18,169,63,3,0.08925112308655465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358758450503113,0.0,0.0,0.2655393948290209,0.0,0.0,0.07344606961170137,0.07945242188396318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06862860451051446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3985350819327572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09168548876324008,0.09441585394897947,0.0,0.09357810448257614,0.0,0.0,0.2137792780638924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324842749223428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05894952505128018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04512804952875602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856178099150787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983201743404287,0.0,0.07892447338907982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159740123643892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856796798919117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09810016625971077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126081415410643,0.04360359049172784,0.0,0.0788103768418034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966474930673833,0.09722063790456424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18023638336443065,0.0,0.0712393949423053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787950091696185,0.0,0.0,0.09910281002930928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095580925555587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287062194194695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935594419395071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20064400364951013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634480858734573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411812726542232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800941548013895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964724017379491,0.17156554761439632,0.0,0.4251325337011971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059565397818445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579278744399377,0.07084338720828179,0.07159186739528005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964569158478136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057474797054727085
mentalhealth,typical_weirdo_,2020/01/12,"I'm feeling exhausted mentally and physically but can't sleep I decided to smoke a joint with some friends and proceeded to have the biggest panic attack I've ever had, it lasted at least 3 hours and I had to remind myself to breath or I wouldn't. I felt like I was going to faint multiple times and my arms lost a lot of strength as well so I was really scared that I was having a heart attack. I couldn't form proper conversations and to top it all of I'm on birth control and am having my first period on it and am bleeding super heavy for the past 5 or so days.
So I'm so exhausted but I can't sleep",2.5090697674418614,3.7385435116279058,4.716968992248066,84.22056976744187,75.12403100775194,8.26077519379845,23.752713178294567,8.841846274778883,1.5785466666666659,479,14,103,10,10,167,79,129,0.19899999999999998,0.66,0.141,-0.8462,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,6,6,12,2,2,5,0,14,9,5,1,2,22,21,16,0,2,4,0,2,1,1,1,4,0,0,0,4,8,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,7,1,1,7,2,12,5,14,12,5,16,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,4,11,72,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45011518585486016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22188061167345088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758251470613532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789465002528955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002764021903372,0.0,0.1899456364936181,0.0,0.0,0.1682721591346939,0.0,0.0,0.15284120715882066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243005326192672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344268028808577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948204566500497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16125599701192272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664863222562724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159523274774681,0.16818605472001788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19936381403551395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23210820721256084,0.0,0.0,0.18884894516726788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267335042774709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19806006088450906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3959411813047412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535493549188085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778708800862592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RedBlindCat,2020/01/12,"I want to hurt my self, how do I tackle it? When I get really mad and sad, all my anger needs to get out; I will seclude myself and then, depending on the situation, slap myself or hit myself repeatedly. If I'm trying to withhold my anger, let's say I'm among others and can't seclude myself, I will drill my nails into my skin (not to the point of penetration thou) or I will twist my fingers almost like I want to brake them. So any ideas of what to do, in those situations? 

I have learned to count to ""10""  ( more like: at least 40, for me) but it's just isn't enough...",3.1437500000000007,3.5411705416666663,4.911666666666669,86.56500000000004,72.75,8.0,23.333333333333336,8.07648339933343,0.9290833333333336,435,10,101,6,8,149,79,120,0.102,0.838,0.059000000000000004,-0.7834,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,1,0,4,7,3,0,2,0,9,2,2,2,1,22,17,11,0,4,6,0,2,2,0,3,0,1,0,1,5,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,3,21,2,17,12,4,10,0,2,0,0,4,7,0,5,5,71,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326447276639557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15799222612971864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400587817791032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24276545550890205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487138485051937,0.26227205695373285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23757295410989154,0.0,0.22700920280221654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172269597627562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21962674995723602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488364145040194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18475797638383112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423706432852682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5222968430106848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15773667888056447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740682626710157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Smurfette0795,2020/01/12,"Want to stop CBT but my psychologist doesn't agree?!?! I've been having Cognitive Behavioural Therapy for the last 4 months and I'm feeling a lot better, I told my psychologist that I was thinking about stopping CBT because I don't feel I need it anymore and he said he wouldn't feel comfortable discharging me and that I was to take some time to think about it and we would talk again in our next session.

I see him again in 2 weeks and I'm still pretty sure that I want to stop CBT. I suppose my question is, can he stop me? I mean even if he doesn't agree with my decision, surely he can't refuse to discharge me?",3.6867366579177614,4.649604795275593,4.500734908136484,87.9279702537183,71.91338582677166,7.8491688538932625,27.496937882764648,8.167268648758528,1.557763604549432,487,17,106,7,9,157,77,127,0.135,0.691,0.174,0.7346,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,2,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,2,0,12,0,0,0,2,31,27,7,0,6,2,0,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,5,8,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,5,19,4,11,20,2,14,0,0,1,0,13,2,0,4,12,62,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632059287690551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031832227043708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554585740489046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10869474180300484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496295782197227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414381075517756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399087086004865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17926136174578985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135555600694368,0.0,0.0,0.12202410994344473,0.0,0.0,0.17501853393120634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674234790115683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18435234738535808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565406005596397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13113833952531326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314231653171742,0.5503404619033887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102043015991635,0.0,0.12373366475143463,0.13227246581218646,0.0,0.0,0.18819634370083932,0.0,0.0,0.2108953706187999,0.0,0.0,0.0959601560440228,0.0,0.0,0.1572505175905398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19413138636614694,0.0,0.13200546628587187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690344968213805,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LazarBsherlock,2020/01/12,"I just cut for the first time in over a year. It was barely more than scratches (one bled more than the others, but I doubt any of the cuts will leave a scar) but I know it'll go downhill unless they finally put me on medication. I don't know how to feel about this, I liked it in a way but of course, I didn't want to relapse, especially after so long.",1.7601754385964874,2.9070353684210564,3.478947368421053,92.68096491228071,76.89473684210526,6.64561403508772,20.561403508771924,7.1686216300943375,0.19089298245614028,272,6,66,3,6,91,56,76,0.141,0.799,0.06,-0.4325,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,4,4,2,1,6,0,5,1,0,1,0,11,10,6,0,1,5,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,3,0,2,2,2,8,1,14,6,2,13,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,7,47,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20463476441424952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152153335168187,0.2149760952074708,0.0,0.3296412912735465,0.0,0.2559609541145977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17101880579687945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33075365837509746,0.0,0.0,0.3186290328413982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701348247716126,0.0,0.0,0.2663032280872211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30314353124063026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039100293876054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025060078889521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17546788192510948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748941115323802,0.2388549416806245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19378152061322826
mentalhealth,Juno56,2020/01/12,"Is there even a condition for this? My voice makes me suicidal. I get told on a regular basis that I sound like an AI or that I sound emotionless, and every single time it happens I immediately want to kill myself extremely badly. I don't get used to it at all, it always stays the same degree of pain. 

The fuck is this called?",2.3390909090909098,4.316138060606065,4.433333333333334,82.87000000000003,77.48484848484848,8.036363636363637,21.60606060606061,8.841846274778883,1.5225333333333335,256,7,52,6,6,88,52,66,0.265,0.684,0.051,-0.9581,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,5,0,3,2,0,2,1,7,11,2,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,8,1,6,10,3,4,0,0,0,1,2,2,1,1,2,36,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221703262439016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229388018003345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726429113682485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17635490102076895,0.0,0.2249640150199339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24684268323614825,0.2789991601971594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23611246537677094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954025054269178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044561221875034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822853408470954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841131387826721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28459279906211554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29206115465917565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569330714959526,0.0,0.0,0.25513561194528445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23060739833238025,0.0,0.0,0.15748701758579478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fluffy_lulu,2020/01/12,"Anxiety about work It's taken me a very long time to go back into the hospitality industry after numerous anxiety and panic attacks and now I have a restaurant job in a nice hotel chain. I'm up to a point now where I'm happy and know what I'm doing, but when I got my new roster a few days ago, they have put me into an entirely new area. Problem is, that they did that to someone else a few days ago, and explained to her that it was a typo in the roster. She has to go back to the uniform station and change from the bar uniform to restaurant uniform without being allowed to clock on, and lost half an hour of her shift. I can't stop thinking about the fact that they are going to do the same with me or that I won't cope in the new surroundings they put me in.",7.556798941798937,4.6616638333333364,8.294973544973548,76.8116666666667,64.98765432098764,10.985537918871252,35.48853615520282,8.841846274778883,2.8279425044091706,599,20,129,7,7,204,95,162,0.08800000000000001,0.87,0.042,-0.7281,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,4,2,8,6,1,1,16,0,12,1,0,1,1,20,24,9,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,9,1,1,3,2,0,5,3,4,0,1,5,0,16,2,24,17,3,35,0,1,0,0,8,12,0,1,18,94,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753178555461104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375992575674313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766695578804978,0.0,0.2388232897131239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642806596607576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20030380822284052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972836718371195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647717974394701,0.0,0.12420294856128412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165313550841141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15293349357708336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410551933301087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534562444716137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743046958303828,0.0,0.0,0.16952195090352254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4499522834948061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18220426965066067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468032032054371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14859556500606888,0.0,0.3122271030244708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158026156874367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12983289480613186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950624518484903,0.0,0.0,0.09055328988280514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813396884742706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14969805557445626,0.0,0.11305601843035999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,matzzzz1,2020/01/12,"I hate my life. I know hate is a strong word, but I am so done with everything and I just wanna kill myself. I'm 16 and I despise high school, it was going pretty okay but now it's so bad, I hate walking the halls the environment just makes me feel so uncomfortable, and I feel so lonely even though I have so many caring friends. I'm currently failing math, and I don't want to make the mistake I did last year and hopefully, I won't. My parents are toxic as shit, I can't talk to them about anything, how I always feel so depressed and sad and I've tried so many times to tell them but they always say 'it's in your head get over it'. 'there's no such thing.' And we always fight, and due to them, I'm always in a moody and shitty mood when I come back home. They always body shame me, saying I should go on a diet, or I'm too fat. I use to have an eating disorder for 2 years, and I told them but they never did anything, instead, my mom would praise how I look good skinny. And I feel like my eating disorder is coming back, I've not been eating well, not eating really nothing. I know my parents aren't proud of me, I have average grades and they always compare me to my older sister. My mom's side family is also so toxic they make feel bad about my weight and how I look. I get yelled at everyday for not doing something right, or I get everything I want which I don't. I don't love my family one bit, I wish I could get new ones, who aren't toxic and actually listen to me and actually love me.  I've tried to attempt to kill myself before but my friends would stop me, I give up anyone could shoot me and I would be fine with it, I just want this pain to go away.",1.8015265401007348,3.1282307528089923,3.682417667570711,90.52612359550562,77.14606741573034,6.595738086013174,20.14103060829136,7.237678284180719,0.3124398682681133,1292,28,294,15,29,437,174,356,0.27399999999999997,0.606,0.12,-0.9969,3,2,1,1,1,4,38.0,1,1,9,5,28,33,8,1,7,1,28,15,5,7,1,65,68,39,2,13,13,5,6,1,2,5,3,4,1,0,9,22,8,1,7,0,0,6,12,18,1,2,6,12,63,14,26,54,1,32,1,4,2,2,30,11,1,3,16,190,72,4,0.0,0.0,0.14725120719830226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033511479814265,0.3766687873335622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05275445065376205,0.0,0.12417326753833208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07088514702198362,0.11602851062991128,0.12599055499959294,0.0,0.0,0.0642000275063972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236882388505658,0.08380485337077151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692346936726417,0.0,0.0,0.1299821994324555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047693239190005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498258027171452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729381017588734,0.0,0.0,0.07720870105997747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088053670551387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983217743406663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561419344238898,0.0,0.1422498492952618,0.0,0.19074190753988776,0.053899509241809945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658067046402318,0.0,0.15767223450470574,0.07237584851604731,0.12863518189791553,0.06328154880022914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234655304153741,0.07743061452900532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971413056374743,0.07567971352935958,0.07493611337474262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16694234160431287,0.0,0.08292763829925345,0.06149955433307875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05329060292187189,0.03685970084162663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671332633140253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13618812391443605,0.0,0.15108481617888597,0.15298327890522986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17672574506340544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058189547452138224,0.07286739548606795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239364267971149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224997809982578,0.0,0.0802811618005465,0.0,0.16755041908477225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675694678822594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04833342124669958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443151388097061,0.0,0.1199973155898125,0.0,0.07635661485638602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774454874098788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808295618783765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307725445546276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060641617769703074,0.0659441959939877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050123780691558005,0.0,0.07412651085686615,0.0,0.043993880874688925,0.0,0.0,0.07209305219540955,0.0,0.1024474201665724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516217425652547,0.0,0.0,0.1335021758704579,0.0,0.0,0.09187438869935843,0.06783611187699669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676057988606478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607866217973868,0.0,0.0,0.09717107244974936
mentalhealth,HappySunflowerCookie,2020/01/12,"Could somebody check in with me from time to time? (eating) So, I get this moment of clarity every now and then before my eating behavior spirals out of control and I think this moment might have arrived right now.   
I know that this is a lot to ask for, but could somebody check in with me from time to time for some time? Asking me, if I had eaten, sending reminders that it is important to eat. I do not wanna go back to heavy restricting but I feel myself kinda... messing up everywhere. I am not in danger. I am healthy weight. There is no immediate threat attached and you would not have any responsibilty - duh.  I just have a hard time figuring out what is normal and what is not.",2.5607981492192025,4.8708196315789465,3.748872180451128,86.40716020821287,78.24812030075188,6.498322729901678,23.764603817235397,7.61054688173877,1.2224267206477737,533,18,103,8,13,173,82,133,0.092,0.826,0.08199999999999999,-0.3603,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,1,6,3,2,0,2,1,16,5,0,1,0,31,24,9,0,6,8,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,8,5,2,4,0,2,2,5,3,0,0,2,3,15,0,20,18,2,21,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,5,12,82,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084115041033196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2980735622655878,0.0,0.0,0.12258463412713147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13565522542861405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17880380709613233,0.25456882274610504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4893813520242244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431876760305314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060786722693852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08329070619727479,0.0,0.0906024253477342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428095828496773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761341626081727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13553372986313944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691201093382778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561983820716134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13614435818363166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215031100192612,0.0,0.0,0.5577567542575433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19413139517558128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324785088633806,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zylaaa,2020/01/12,Help Lately I feel very drawn out or emotionless alot lately like im always zoned out I dont feel good at all :(,-0.16000000000000014,2.060239666666672,1.788333333333334,96.49000000000002,89.83333333333334,4.866666666666667,12.166666666666668,6.42735559955562,-0.9157333333333328,88,1,20,1,3,29,19,24,0.193,0.618,0.18899999999999997,-0.0274,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,3,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,3,3,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,3,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462516132923458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468476819757512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992793926143609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482263039739725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19836703699112476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196735466716813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6676822170804031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14458475620416816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24418727053729505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MaEyeMe6042,2020/01/12,I keep seeing white eyes First instance of seeing one was 2 years ago. After that every couple of months ill see another person with a white right eye. Its always the right eye. It looks like cataracts but ive seen it in mostly young people. The thing is i saw the first guy recently again and his eyes were normal. I dont know if it can be explained or if im going crazy. I feel sick to my gut just thinking that im losing it.,0.6016666666666666,2.797832500000002,2.211111111111112,95.24000000000002,85.1111111111111,4.488888888888889,15.666666666666668,5.6839178017228535,-0.7278666666666664,335,6,73,2,10,109,69,90,0.14300000000000002,0.8370000000000001,0.02,-0.9022,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,4,0,7,7,5,0,0,14,19,5,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,8,2,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,4,13,7,1,6,14,1,13,0,1,12,0,4,3,0,4,10,42,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15557254260115252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603229462511974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18402986944627067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19419038480369727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056878418262006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478685829779782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873943169988907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29856499143293064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974222135606448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737752524018013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3791460362616593,0.0,0.0,0.15599485186827544,0.0,0.0,0.0964516868605659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857417477758489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473780554110771,0.19634261465417105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400845701916687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17195537029225472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189251626049611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167146516170398,0.1532421766390018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17328773038985915,0.0,0.0,0.29975667115341104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195587568541417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659618671603612,0.11245503519845616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301797620242802
mentalhealth,starlightz1234567890,2020/01/12,"Is it normal to not be affected by this? I was molested when i was eight years old by my 17 year old family friend. I had no idea at that time the severity of that situation. Now that i’m 18 i realized how fucked up it was and have not told a single soul about it. I don’t feel anything about it, or it hasn’t affected my childhood. Although, sometimes i do feel guilty or disgusted. I don’t even know if i believe myself but it did happened i clearly remember every moment he touched me and what he did.

Should i just keep it to myself? do i tell someone? what should i do with this information?",1.145159474671669,3.3485937723577277,3.3536585365853675,87.87056285178238,82.82113821138212,7.036647904940589,24.09568480300188,8.139509932561175,1.5462375234521577,466,18,99,10,13,159,79,123,0.09699999999999999,0.833,0.07,-0.4966,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,7,4,3,0,2,0,17,1,0,3,1,25,25,9,0,4,7,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,14,3,0,1,7,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,7,3,17,1,10,15,1,11,1,0,0,1,6,2,1,3,9,77,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740833929267931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291997569677695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13436582982726072,0.0,0.17140139788837475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19177888693154027,0.0,0.20572406030895893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15717212587632434,0.18807088307631825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17989546737447326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296515256700708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18082093663935606,0.0,0.0,0.1118016662069106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993215208324204,0.0,0.0,0.4269382253245294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23045036422455364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298218160379669,0.0,0.0,0.22866764428363184,0.0,0.0,0.17236844394330236,0.0,0.20120081604030654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17780974208376255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862364069622462,0.0,0.0,0.1943893139293977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26200885566741633
mentalhealth,Nebraska29,2020/01/12,"Is are words like “crazy,” “insane,” “maniac” etc considered offensive or problematic? Question from someone not living with a mental illness. I read an [article](https://www.pennmedicine.org/news/news-blog/2018/september/that-crazy-why-you-might-want-to-rethink-that-word-in-your-vocabulary) claiming that using the word crazy is problematic because it stigmatizes mental illness. Doing some more research, I found [this post](https://www.nami.org/personal-stories/don-t-call-me-crazy) on NAMI saying the issue is with calling people with mental illness crazy, which I get.

Reason why I ask is because people say “crazy” literally all the time, but it has a ton of different meanings from “you must be crazy” to “that’s crazy!” to “that’s driving me crazy” and so on. Same applies to all sorts of similar words like nuts or insane. It’s not always obvious that the usage is creating stigma though. Like saying “she’s crazy about you” or “that was a crazy party” or titles like Crazy Stupid Love. Is it contextually a problem, always a problem, or even a problem at all?

Society also has a lot built on the idea of insanity, like the phrase “to keep my sanity,” psychological thrillers, or how movie and book plots feature violent, mentally unstable characters. Can the concept of insanity be separated from mental illness, or is it just a problematic way of seeing mental illness?",9.14868131868132,10.169852341880345,8.729426129426134,62.246923076923075,59.769230769230774,11.472039072039076,38.08180708180709,11.20814326018867,4.784457631257633,1104,50,159,28,14,353,133,234,0.33799999999999997,0.56,0.102,-0.996,1,0,0,0,0,0,67.0,0,2,0,0,7,13,4,0,16,0,16,6,0,3,5,39,24,14,0,4,11,0,0,5,0,1,5,3,0,0,12,5,0,1,5,2,0,1,2,7,0,0,2,4,9,6,20,19,9,7,0,0,1,1,10,4,0,11,6,100,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439965355566043,0.17563412429916087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866489759339224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867142348911045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21553462964251505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026599256359773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770409688724953,0.06970764082293407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571827637711082,0.0,0.0,0.055139871748257886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914090127250675,0.0,0.11015549630085757,0.0,0.09380808290863152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578055906255058,0.0,0.09319303993084857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897256467548244,0.09525324112856076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149631197491848,0.0,0.0,0.6381520935355867,0.11196040428420698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14633517394717316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107737202135034,0.0,0.0,0.30296025953265665,0.0,0.0,0.11822804859956945,0.0,0.10556775220848863,0.0,0.0,0.1085118667024214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517870040673527,0.0,0.0,0.08410107166282263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942301472818373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369172009600612,0.0,0.0615407514648011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911519759361364,0.0,0.0,0.0622497497523634,0.08377209800925622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523270503222564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mformeat,2020/01/12,idk how to tell my parents how i feel how do I explain how I feel to my extremely dismissive who ignores me because they do not want to deal with it. I feel like I have so much on my chest,5.442857142857144,3.2297599523809524,6.647619047619048,84.80571428571429,68.52380952380952,10.304761904761904,35.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.6076285714285716,146,6,36,2,2,50,28,42,0.12300000000000001,0.815,0.062,-0.1244,1,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,4,0,12,8,5,0,1,1,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,10,1,5,8,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,27,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245507385274444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3797662012703343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5587663836365009,0.26315868605967996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17996361337017658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27078927711941186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4090236511921233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.321965602565792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21727011174668145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fullofdoubt69,2020/01/12,"Worried about seeking a counselor while pregnant I’ve been diagnosed with agoraphobia for years now, and I worry something else is up (I’ve worried for awhile) but now that a baby is involved it’s time I take responsibility and get it under control, as I’ve already been arrested three times in my early 20s due to my issues. My worry is, some of the things I struggle badly with involve suicidal thoughts, and violence. I’m not worried about ever hurting my child, but I’m not sure if a therapist would have to report that? 

I’d also like to get help as I find my feelings towards the child’s father very unstable, and I think that has to do with some unresolved trauma (not related to him) or personality disorder. 

It’s also hard for to to find time right now as I already see a psychiatrist (who I wasn’t honest about with my anger and I’m scared to back track now) probation officer and prenatal care appointments I have to schedule around work so I worry about having time to even see one. 

I’m willing to make time though before the baby is born, I just want to be sure when I express how easily I can feel suicidal or violent they won’t report me to CPS.",5.228442503639009,6.0116544061135375,6.54391266375546,75.33758660844252,68.25764192139738,9.600116448326057,32.29723435225619,9.725611199111238,3.1346172343522563,925,39,171,20,15,314,131,229,0.295,0.631,0.07400000000000001,-0.9962,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,19,12,2,2,7,0,17,1,0,3,3,37,33,21,2,3,9,1,3,1,0,3,1,0,0,3,8,11,0,1,6,0,0,0,5,7,0,2,4,5,21,5,33,25,2,24,0,1,2,0,11,6,0,6,19,119,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271084931014024,0.16458041443578753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160405659200203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912481989023176,0.08591836539219701,0.0,0.0,0.08756150683678714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491482870844453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541266271184228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444274836192828,0.0,0.0,0.11793391192855555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08596091026461551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679653999314911,0.09308020165163093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406007280574124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881000189163074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752346202795318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921794366972694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897263500582597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015807001665302,0.0,0.0,0.10740232020987432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050272423122005916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868747921467808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972864735577483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898495277268308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787722781942713,0.0,0.0,0.10302224620325373,0.0,0.16399817588863685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921852003623173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757487879130194,0.0,0.22511484587010427,0.0,0.19396669120265755,0.0,0.07736904168797441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194764489968663,0.06836311347798321,0.06593505798921047,0.10110009667104744,0.0816922122549046,0.3000131503527801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490442635684113,0.060693907979204764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749134400296922,0.6270081604110614,0.0,0.0730981975689077,0.0,0.0,0.06626512366991466
mentalhealth,BIGGS0329,2020/01/12,"If I haven't asked for help from people who I care about and care about me, does it mean I haven't yet reached a point where I need help? I figure that if I haven't felt the need to ask for help that with my mental health then maybe I don't need help. I don't know maybe that's completely wrong and ignorant. Please let me know.",4.447500000000002,3.62492430555556,4.3772222222222235,95.74,69.83333333333333,8.311111111111114,22.16666666666667,7.1686216300943375,0.16959999999999995,258,3,67,2,4,79,43,72,0.22399999999999998,0.655,0.121,-0.6579999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,14,17,5,0,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,1,11,2,7,15,0,4,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,2,38,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31172927008919715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399728978507494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17480716751714334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14590148420683513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16008139238622696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772200443218781,0.0,0.0,0.4470069080605632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18325453685604284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048680589551776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3349937667387591,0.18161154716989453,0.0,0.0,0.16801879491085947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3708716789223898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11558557824414907,0.0,0.0,0.18301312188553276,0.1576082733394934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18228675645377265,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway2878786,2020/01/12,"How do I stop being aroused by myself? In the past I was really insecure about the size of my genitalia and started to compare it to household objects and get aroused when I saw I was bigger. I would read articles online about how to increase my size and then try some of the techniques they suggested. Almost every time I'd watch porn, I'd also look at my erection and flex to make it look bigger. This would make me more aroused and then I'd watch myself ejaculate. It came to a point where I was masturbating multiple times everyday. My routine was to sit on the couch or bed and then go on my phone or laptop. I don't remember when the exactly time it began, but was about 17 or 18 when I started to feel a tingling sensation sometimes when seeing other guy's genitals. I never sought out gay porn and would usually get spammed trolling pictures in group chats. I didn't make that big of a deal out of the feeling because I was sure I'm not attracted to guys, but vowed not to watch anymore oral sex porn and to minimize the amount of male genitalia and guys in general that I saw in porn.  I remember leaving the group chats for a while(I don't think it was because of this stuff though), but I went back because I was a lonely recluse without any friends and the people in there seemed like the closest things to friends. I would also get these awkward feelings when seeing some conventionally attractive guys in movies and shows and would feel a sensation in my groin again, but not like the other tingling sensation. And on top of all of that, I started getting intrusive thoughts(which I have a history of)telling me to ""suck his(the guy on the screens)dick"". I would always respond ""no I don't want to"" and shudder in disgust. Also I would either become hyper aware of the spit in my mouth or produce more when I had these thoughts and responses, which is the same thing that happened years before when I had intrusive thoughts about being a cannibal. I went online a few times to look what could be happening to me, but I had other more distressing problems in my life at that point, so I wouldn't ever obsess that much. In the aftermath of an unrelated crisis, I was at home one day, texting in a group chat. I don't remember the exact reason, it was either trolling or to get nudes, but I went on google images to search for a believable ""dick pic"". As I scrolled down I suddenly felt my genitals slightly growing and then I freaked out. I checked the page a few more times and got mixed results. I deleted the group chat app from my phone and called my mom, asked her to contact a therapist. She got someone to call me and I talked to him about what had just happened and had been happening for the past few years. He said to stop watching so much porn, that my brain might have associated erections with pleasure, and that I have an overactive imagination which it's helped by sitting around all day at home basically doing nothing. I took his advice and abstained from porn for a while, that is until I relapsed. However, this time I would only masturbate to pictures of women or videos of them masturbating. I would also avoid looking at my genitals at any time. the intrusive thoughts keep increasing, but the phrases telling me to""suck that guy's dick"" when I was watching tv and movies stopped happening. I realized that those phrases are the same things I would tell the woman on screen in porn to do to the guys, so limiting myself to only watching women I had no reason to say any of those things when watching porn. After that realization I saw that the images on genitals that would intrusively pop into my head were my own. Almost all of these images had the genitals facing away from me and shared the same skin color. That's the same thing I would see when I used to look at myself while I was masturbating to porn. I came to same conclusion as the therapist; that I had conditioned myself, similar to pavlov and his dogs, to be aroused by my own genitals and that brain would then get confused when it saw another guys' genitals. And then my obsessive tendencies would focus on this and keep me from moving on. Despite thinking this though, the thoughts and groinal responses, as I found out people call them, were getting more intense. At this point I had stopped watching most live action tvs shows and movies as well as limiting my music to instrumentals, to avoid male voices. I would constantly see if I was still attracted to women, change my body language if I though it was stereotypically gay, and scan my memory for any instances of being gay or something that could be misconstrued as gay. This and constantly going online to forums and articles to give myself reassurance took up hours of my day and eventually the entire day. I also went to mom and brother for reassurance, but their responses that I thought were positive didn't last long in my mind against the intrusive thoughts and doubt. Every time I though I had clarity or made logically points, the doubt would poke a hole, however irrational, that I felt obligated to response to and debate in length. All the while my body was going through almost every physical response there is when the intrusive thoughts and groinal responses spammed my mind. I couldn't sleep and asked my mom to contact a new therapist because I didn't think the previous therapist was dedicating even time in our sessions to address these intrusive thoughts. She got me a therapist who I could text. There was a lot of latency though, so to get through the intensive days I've been having, I forced myself to look, without averting my eyes or getting up from my seat, at pictures of ""attractive guys"" on google images. I sat there, hands on my knees, for about two minutes feeling awkward and disgusted, but nothing happened. I was overjoyed, but I wanted to kill the doubt once and for all, so I searched up pictures of ""scantily clad women"" to show that I was attracted to women and that the impotent result with the pictures of guys wasn't universal. I was almost instantly aroused when I looked at the women. After that I was elated and thought I was done with all of this, until the doubt seeped back in and said that I hadn't looked at male genitalia so I could only conclusively say that I'm not attracted to guy's faces or body. I couldn't let this stand, so I powered up my laptop and decide to subject myself to pictures of ""big dicks"". As I mentioned earlier, opening my laptop and sitting on the couch was my routine, so I could feel the arousal come as intrusive thoughts of my genitalia crept into my mind. My laptop finished loading and I open google and searched up the pictures. As I looked at them I felt a slight tingling as a semi erection was building up as well as a sort of tunnel vision feeling that I usually get before I'm about to masturbate. I felt horrible and jumped out of my seat. I didn't want it to be true, but i almost felt certain. Then I realized this is what kept me from making progress the first time I had this sensation over male genitalia. I collected myself enough to sit down again and stared at the pictures for about two minutes like I had with the pictures of ""attractive guys"". I was disgusted and clenching my butt, but nothing happened. Not even a little premature ejaculate. I was shaking almost uncontrollably after I closed the tab, but I felt near vindication. To secure this vindication, I quickly searched up pictures of gay porn, and sat there for about two minutes again. I had the same disgust and clenching, but nothing happened. No arousal at all. I couldn't fully appreciate the results because I was still shaking nearly uncontrollably, but I finally saw I wasn't gay. After that, the thoughts tried to get me to believe that I like female noses because the shape of them can be misconstrued as a phallus. I've gotten past that intrusive thought, but now I'm obsessing over whether or not I can reverse the conditioning my brain has gone through to associate my genitals with arousal. there's not much information online about something like that and like I said earlier, my therapist is slow to respond. I've been looking up stuff about pavlov's dogs and seeing how they were able to get rid of their conditioning and how i can apply it to myself. 

Tldr-Was insecure about the size of my genitals. Eventually started to masturbate all the time and look at myself, getting pleasure when I ""made"" myself bigger. Then thought I was gay because I got slightly aroused to images of male genitalia and guys in general, as well as having intrusive thoughts, but then subjected myself to looking at pictures of the genitalia and gay porn for a significantly longer period of time and got no reactions in the slightest. Still feel iffy about being aroused by my own genitals though and need help reversing this.",9.214656156501725,8.001808367878791,8.55350901419256,70.9385420023015,60.47272727272727,12.015036440352898,40.886075949367104,11.02714972722196,4.510642807825086,7077,330,1247,151,79,2237,494,1650,0.099,0.8340000000000001,0.067,-0.9952,4,4,2,0,0,0,154.0,1,0,8,9,75,55,6,19,84,0,114,56,32,17,15,270,241,158,1,32,43,4,16,6,2,18,4,6,6,25,76,80,0,14,46,10,1,21,29,28,3,5,106,58,186,27,231,99,39,204,1,1,35,35,85,87,5,31,97,908,262,7,0.028063843459507912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02742366302991269,0.0,0.0,0.1686113124654502,0.0,0.0,0.11221322737690548,0.023351365905936988,0.0,0.0,0.0763375036106534,0.029427386798881894,0.0,0.0,0.02783179173214136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024982770559289748,0.052471810588487384,0.0,0.026366904735443,0.04315872668537207,0.0,0.1197522094561691,0.030994310236824744,0.047760527568603925,0.06323668273508712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351781062863347,0.0,0.0939855917132539,0.08596896569387846,0.06419512124894781,0.0,0.0,0.02968782524731148,0.0241745161978434,0.0,0.06065408983337466,0.0,0.11203347713345632,0.0,0.0,0.0904942868376972,0.028932590327521573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0287190554174117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028997452231898594,0.0,0.037071807857187375,0.02538535309448457,0.07093499549483663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351937981819905,0.0,0.16167414431685442,0.030742568760059787,0.0,0.02387109091023636,0.0,0.030770555829840743,0.04336411168288433,0.0,0.19060859889720272,0.02692139585148414,0.04784798690869399,0.0,0.11222609647729044,0.0,0.0,0.3612390238092513,0.19853411271181226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028801599808489207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037621205420953666,0.0,0.05630064635163683,0.0,0.027637232776840596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04988886704505622,0.03104848478361472,0.0,0.0,0.022875778050789625,0.0,0.029715558124511314,0.0,0.028697181320913864,0.019822322581902103,0.08226345812896653,0.028127343782638918,0.0247808879281922,0.02483561834401257,0.28279872535681155,0.0,0.0,0.02385887613673447,0.0,0.05310937447346737,0.07493133371414952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029771303018130444,0.0850094453748542,0.09860410283712642,0.0,0.029827424286724486,0.06189046202985781,0.02080898432955583,0.021644566157043348,0.02710423489007019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771205874176594,0.0,0.0,0.029887077379607583,0.019016786626139915,0.064031452668525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037034221653318,0.038911870974787606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061176124203171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026853308085902916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028071437934108604,0.0,0.017978416735942353,0.05770861020580403,0.0,0.0,0.0953725917608803,0.0,0.08008542505643891,0.04463498943839726,0.0,0.0,0.11181624899583266,0.025548269081288343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02808411083162704,0.0,0.023778403492626825,0.0432098355409398,0.02775585877207249,0.0,0.0794549313777971,0.0,0.0672354649149224,0.09385051899149993,0.0,0.0,0.06425277309082955,0.0,0.0,0.026449840338641114,0.0,0.0,0.0225566543332559,0.04905807229516273,0.0,0.0,0.19550571166220612,0.09322185295494108,0.05394653316155861,0.16543550226630352,0.31191379723161505,0.19637103365627875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062359925372458026,0.038107015099879626,0.0,0.08224289167198605,0.0,0.0,0.02423815020716966,0.061816717481416227,0.0,0.04965834594458908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569829680661809,0.10406185618632066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054105087268752745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31897198724207554,0.0,0.0,0.03614439015734547
mentalhealth,mentalhealth_hsa,2020/01/12,"Can I pay for therapy with an HSA account? I have searched online and I'm seeing multiple help forms say that it's eligible as medical treatment. Is there something that qualifies as a medical treatment (e.g. does it need some kind of diagnosis first?)

My HSA account is with Optum Bank and their knowledge base says ""You can include in medical expenses amounts you pay for therapy received as medical treatment.""

I have asked my company that I have the HSA through, but have not heard back yet. Not sure if the answer is something that lies with the HSA account, my company, or some government direction. Any help or direction would be great!",5.321379310344831,7.803767689655174,5.718482758620691,74.72479310344829,70.3793103448276,10.157241379310344,37.46206896551725,10.355215969177356,4.6916751724137935,516,30,85,16,10,165,72,116,0.07,0.8340000000000001,0.096,0.7318,0,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,1,1,3,3,0,0,5,0,11,4,0,0,1,18,16,9,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,6,5,0,0,2,0,7,1,2,0,0,1,1,4,10,3,11,13,4,5,0,0,1,0,10,1,0,5,3,58,16,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262069801495099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15482329536799386,0.0,0.0,0.12734411514250174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492670885553993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14086805533493968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825859647175832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220102159107214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17245766561366954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6673399055094192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279795536042132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633999504139267,0.0,0.0,0.13196998503437385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25498983380707513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608576861588955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3787796726971608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176448211931223,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Savage-Idiot1120,2020/01/12,"Don’t know what to do I write this sitting in a parking lot. In the past I was plagued by depression anxiety and not to help, self medicating. From the age of 19 -24 I was extremely depressed switching in and out of mania failed suicide by Xanax once , didn’t know you couldn’t OD and suicide by hanging, My fat ass snapped the beam. But for the past year I’ve made great improvements and felt so good at times. Long story short I know that I have a lifelong illness that will be present but every high I feel is met with an equal low, usually worse. Is my whole life gonna be struggling with depression and mania? Is it worth it ?because I thought I had beat it and now I might just cock back this 40 cal and slip away into what would be bliss Ik I benefit my family but really I’m just a piece of shit they’d be hurt but idk The word burden is used a lot I feel like that but I know I’m not to them Im also catholic thats a mortal sin not that I practice I’d destroy my mom sister and gf who I just moved in with and the predecessor to some of the stress no fault of her own. Idk I just don’t feel like I was made to live this life and It’d be best if I just moved on. Tupac said his worst fear in death is reincarnation but I think I could come back as something happy.",0.7822857529061906,2.6785933978102205,2.4071938361719383,95.8791551770749,82.17518248175182,5.811084076777508,20.732089753987566,6.937597516519254,0.2135221951878888,997,29,237,12,27,326,157,274,0.27399999999999997,0.617,0.109,-0.9944,0,0,1,0,0,2,15.0,0,1,2,3,10,22,2,3,13,0,26,9,4,3,0,53,45,20,5,4,15,2,4,2,1,4,6,1,0,1,15,16,1,0,10,0,1,4,8,15,0,0,11,5,28,7,29,21,9,29,1,6,0,2,14,13,3,5,13,149,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205084696477034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880563683727537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814660488218256,0.1770200108390774,0.0,0.07016802210286383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079745960547188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915429504138068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190339409723944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29742389180727824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09698242306749863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085124239180438,0.1295271242853938,0.17460433314295856,0.16446460716262054,0.11052055585422796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654610227878208,0.0,0.12690562660552251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253330316694415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771536454254751,0.12161662835982735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232241841144913,0.0,0.12433507021085605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25303869455700106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626066396205011,0.11247071270822337,0.0,0.10164139182394714,0.10186587432252447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19571932893768276,0.0,0.21783362872325587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159579667015164,0.0,0.12211009887715543,0.0,0.13481166455050267,0.0,0.24468057220637676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258495947424795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197648840758953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374034801042069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949290290614544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008147094192835,0.0,0.11815545115857234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861481956561543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185442269412,0.12033459435400005,0.0,0.2518162601270117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375577408022742,0.0,0.09138192237842116,0.0671196865926406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941529655569288,0.12677385130439178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851260440318935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11730363831637332,0.08176855090423107,0.0,0.0,0.0741249896465751
mentalhealth,SymphonyOfPayne,2020/01/12,Is there anyone I can talk to I'm in a seriously bad state right now but I cant bring myself to talk about except privately. I just need someone who can listen and I dont know where to turn.,-0.4085714285714275,1.6763686190476186,2.295523809523811,93.56614285714286,89.0,5.2647619047619045,15.542857142857144,6.742157984588678,-0.34766285714285683,150,3,35,2,5,52,33,42,0.10099999999999999,0.899,0.0,-0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,6,11,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,6,11,0,6,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23807434730327956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842899392960223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3990447421364856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871211160085248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524645906781524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29077149743536146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2884910099249481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5473363248417207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3703488473348932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway99383939,2020/01/12,I start crying when I'm alone I don't know if this is the right place to tell but when I'm alone or don't have anything to keep my mind busy i start crying out of nowhere i have a supportive family and a supportive boyfriend i know i shouldn't feel this way but don't know why or dont know what should i do to fix this,0.10798434442270023,1.7401733013698646,1.7319373776908016,101.21986301369863,83.10958904109589,5.815264187866927,17.277886497064582,6.868970318607317,-0.4490140900195692,253,5,67,3,7,82,40,73,0.226,0.774,0.0,-0.9163,0,2,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,10,0,0,0,0,16,22,8,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,8,2,5,20,0,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,3,4,38,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773147833076983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14989784315035035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4001768910829988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21348401677815296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17171929208708125,0.0,0.09210291749723504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619075161559225,0.0,0.0,0.4004299593637787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18392437652813154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903129497894988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15555916588387922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25786014691614856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4134141157229143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592112850655441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14458596627605935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436633444044665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,darkkloud666,2020/01/12,It happened Today is the day I was broken to the point I'm not sure I'm me any more all I have are racing thought of violence and hate we are sick of curling up and taking it I will get what's mine he will see and the worst part is I can feel his warm blood trickling across my teeth today is the first of a new beginning,2.320416666666663,2.805666875,3.7926666666666686,93.51899999999999,74.69444444444444,6.871111111111111,22.73333333333333,6.742157984588678,0.3351799999999998,253,6,62,2,5,84,53,72,0.27,0.706,0.024,-0.9616,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,5,0,10,3,2,0,2,9,20,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,3,9,2,6,16,4,9,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,6,42,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18717948748447366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775135253774707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391747065917965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23412757037812035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380680193651502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434027293787192,0.0,0.0,0.2717524606073272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658382344415101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29806900472954245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602002864439877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21933867039954252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25941993512829903,0.0,0.206953798625792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21851781119999047,0.0,0.0,0.5218097676546695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gallantpride,2020/01/12,"How do you choose a therapist? I have found a few therapists in my area but I can't figure out how to choose one. There aren't any reviews online or anything like that, so I'm stuck.",0.7149999999999999,2.7240568461538466,2.433012820512822,94.98490384615386,83.1025641025641,5.951282051282053,20.006410256410245,7.1686216300943375,0.3108410256410257,143,4,33,2,4,47,33,39,0.081,0.8290000000000001,0.09,0.0855,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,0,9,7,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,4,1,3,5,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,22,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341871979453597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833917528666094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775900394000311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824450928494455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23335779994141614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7996931631404288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anynomous_,2020/01/12,"Is every day really the same? This is what I have to question myself everyday.
When I wake up, brush my teeth, go to work, come back home, to repeat this process all over again.
Sometimes I question myself if everything I experience, really is true.
I hate still being alive, while I'd love to live forever.
Everything feels useless and irrelevant. 
Anyone please help, because I don't know anymore.

Quick disclaimer, I want to kill myself, tried a few times, now I'm scared to do it anymore so don't worry, life on earth is a hell I guess?",3.58950377562028,5.704163009708736,4.568478964401297,82.69267529665589,74.24271844660194,7.684573894282633,26.00755124056095,8.515128840125781,1.9222004314994607,422,15,79,8,9,137,75,103,0.168,0.6679999999999999,0.16399999999999998,-0.5363,0,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,3,1,3,0,9,4,2,0,2,12,18,5,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,0,2,12,2,9,17,3,16,1,1,0,1,4,3,1,4,11,50,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3480411220459545,0.12269374116792378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349267395916938,0.0,0.10696578766503327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15115314571535446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316459045418893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14784229285914402,0.0,0.315404909779506,0.171644781186165,0.0,0.0,0.08872365437817756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972448780645286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19330162188870526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17324176196801114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761483659987346,0.0,0.1760122050057154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941331982129739,0.0,0.09643453834762113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394069809373474,0.0,0.0,0.15494453470386546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836986470933287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926149957689988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3931364400774832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22482305104924405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17567756621628458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735457839608861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013175337688166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231883312439774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191336190356348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034976272688284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12774532983236653,0.17819980906752636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,electrahedra,2020/01/12,"5-htp and l-tyrosine for depression? I have been diagnosed with depression. It is hard to say how long this has gone on for. I have felt bad for years with no relief.  I remember aged 16, reading, I think it was Sapiens. The author described how some people are to experience low mood their entire lives. It was at that point I evaluated my own mood. At rest I was below neutral. Enough to make existence unpleasant.

I have read htp and tyr in conjunction can help. Htp is a serotonin precursor but depletes dopamine, tyrosine can conteract dopamine depletion. Does anyone have any experience with these?

I feel like a failure. I do not feel that I do not deserve help. That would imply there is a god. I know that getting help will make me a failure however. I have put up with shit from people all through secondary and sixth form. Looking back I do not now what choice I had. But I was kicked around. I did not act. Now I look for help from people who would do just that, we are all the same. I am offered antidepressants and cognitive bt. I do not want to talk at all about what has happened. I am ashamed. It is best if I do not. When I had to talk about it, seeing the psych, suicide went over in my mind for days afterwards. Talking makes it worse. I am well aware these people are trained. Trained on what, a soft science that can't even repeat its own findings half the time. Fucking laughable. I do not think I will go back to see the gp. I must make my own way. I am nothing but a puppet so far. I have no identity. I am 19 and I have experienced only shit so far. I have not had any of the experiences you would expect a 19 year old guy to have. I do not know who I am. My life is some sort of experiment.",1.0161921353907424,3.4619462915451926,2.5344905070041968,91.7920550380431,86.08454810495627,6.028557206854867,22.943113133755244,7.407850130929222,1.0044412856431777,1330,50,284,23,41,432,179,343,0.14300000000000002,0.7709999999999999,0.086,-0.9659,1,0,0,0,0,1,47.0,1,1,1,1,16,14,3,1,13,0,51,5,2,6,4,54,73,14,1,7,14,0,5,1,0,6,2,1,0,1,21,11,0,0,9,2,0,5,12,8,1,1,12,11,41,4,34,55,13,35,0,3,4,1,15,15,3,4,15,207,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466394240170287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692319202150602,0.0,0.0,0.08814221625035287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522691733314341,0.08267139495803796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390762732120493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385494339741102,0.0,0.1705588346381258,0.10049571661329712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866466036784814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230649556131323,0.0,0.06539689617660717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3874133328495726,0.0,0.0,0.10012750288039014,0.07073462953772182,0.09506763442327666,0.0,0.09049573327227624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153556399120667,0.051730002985926296,0.0,0.05627114894031004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803805226207928,0.08755652547716261,0.0,0.08869585196858866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654642659382385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882948390531412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993553575060092,0.04837256072604941,0.0,0.0874299500713412,0.08762304555429662,0.1662913136246439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643667484551277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999745124314184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500527125140193,0.0,0.10389708019988184,0.0,0.0,0.07530355282972824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27457151223687704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935989217021076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953502216285756,0.0,0.0,0.19807881171341968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216198763055477,0.0,0.0,0.07873880284964031,0.0,0.0,0.1578004645386165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20327004599354392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830372673463023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387477601102571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12688656716698207,0.0,0.0,0.05773505008435007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058400203672302926,0.0785916024603929,0.0,0.0,0.08902422879903912,0.09178568295317764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009023101430107,0.21100715549071727,0.0,0.0,0.12752175127755094
mentalhealth,sunnwilson1,2020/01/12,"Page Question. I have a startup mental health help organization, am I allowed to link it here?",3.5994117647058843,6.6588586470588265,5.0779411764705875,73.79573529411766,80.17647058823529,5.752941176470588,32.029411764705884,7.1686216300943375,2.427964705882353,75,4,12,1,2,25,16,17,0.0,0.828,0.172,0.4019,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,8,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5417560392288142,0.0,0.0,0.3416214753605516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5136281124136276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5709477416279019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,breast_croissant,2020/01/12,"How do i help my boyfriend? Me and my boyfriend have been dating for about 2 years, and although i knew that he had depression even before we started dating, he was a lot better back then than now. I've noticed his symptoms have been getting really out of hand, and i even had talks with him where he honestly said that sometimes he just feels like ending it. Now here's the thing, i knew about this and I've always been supportive and reassuring to him, and he himself went to therapy even though he said it didn't really help, and I'm at this point where im really scared for him and its making me anxious 24/7. He's been diagnosed with clinical depression for 4 years now, and like i said, it was never as bad as it is right now, and he's been hinting that his hope in recovery is getting slim. I will not leave him no matter what, it's important for me to get him back to a healthy mental state, to get rid or at least lessen his suicidal thoughts, and i need to know how to do it even more effectively. Also, i just really wanna know how do people get out of situations like these? He's tried a lot of things that are ""supposed"" to at least help, and yet he says they don't, then what can we do to get him better help from a medical standpoint? Any advise is highly appreciated.",9.84842307692308,5.879568534615388,9.572307692307692,72.74269230769235,61.73076923076921,13.323076923076925,37.92307692307692,11.00357731598739,3.753776923076922,1009,31,213,19,10,331,132,260,0.061,0.737,0.203,0.9862,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,2,0,1,3,23,13,0,1,5,0,23,5,1,5,1,40,45,23,1,3,4,0,2,3,0,1,4,4,0,0,18,18,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,17,6,26,9,31,27,5,29,0,2,0,0,34,11,0,4,19,148,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518389895873084,0.08863306226807073,0.0,0.0,0.07243716211469971,0.0,0.0,0.12033712975756725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381440490993562,0.08893963940191367,0.0,0.0,0.09064056104888743,0.0,0.0,0.1884163317977928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18349081030053,0.1081154225298883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434498517268468,0.0,0.0,0.2814214695133225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0538596451947865,0.07609781409284494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339134036020669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855920853715445,0.11254408757227344,0.0,0.1057982624451819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150597349953964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708106606581352,0.0,0.0,0.1127891586380674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15612067910934804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111876305580246,0.0,0.0,0.07110283819872025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10730755929646424,0.10734697194814924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898313148987605,0.08215468798229263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127357430853004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384746350530656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069570434633164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729574169591453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096738419338554,0.3039743582617395,0.08470887343729884,0.10664496916190992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973279323913598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535087192580077,0.0,0.07539530994333711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651544535507882,0.12087748247508565,0.0,0.11071492728610496,0.0,0.08561663399615148,0.0,0.0,0.1218147509318164,0.0,0.14153413262389947,0.0,0.10465522825505476,0.08456487581822254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231999737838067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874498365798152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719060359732296
mentalhealth,Cyberlek7354,2020/01/12,"Hi, here to help Hi I’d just like to offer my support to anyone that needs it. I’m not professionally trained but I’ve had some experience with depression and loneliness and as mild as it might seem to some other people’s problems It really changed me and I really want to help people where I can. I’m always up to listen and I have discord but pm me for anything.",1.0114666666666672,3.462544280000003,3.550666666666668,84.44866666666668,86.2,6.533333333333335,21.66666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.2668666666666677,291,10,58,6,9,101,50,75,0.187,0.684,0.129,-0.8385,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,16,11,8,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,6,2,11,9,2,2,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,4,1,38,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125080965216889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17857727959100422,0.0,0.2101673322356924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701727709885566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199703013095313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498241376328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34237015449386016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12477250774606505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709324568352033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893712628304654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3541158006027942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24437737002762824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32722360948122725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23250091895087596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898178518916855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506378772532124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jax-ries,2020/01/12,"I want to make a appointment with my gp but I don't know what to say So I've been dealing with panic attacks, self harm, and negative thoughts and feelings for the past few years and I've gonna my decided to deal with this but I'm not sure what to say. When I call up the receptionist always asks what the appointment is for and every time I freeze up and panic. Please help x",1.1147500000000008,3.1429129750000016,2.765000000000004,93.05,81.75,6.5,21.25,7.645422480735847,0.6860000000000004,298,9,68,5,8,98,53,80,0.26899999999999996,0.635,0.096,-0.9640000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,2,4,0,3,0,0,1,1,18,11,9,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,4,8,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,4,6,1,11,8,1,6,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,4,40,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692183910432116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19012154146945398,0.2313603546636698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076613721151178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4193267668929652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713462338012795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282892488194294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363132220205874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176568378828383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135749657866979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4772168442978276,0.0,0.0,0.19413767988644395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22323689291068816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32345264630006043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21215708109186848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916718466698657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145140265433025,0.1185854626829322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995166130694593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13096226516901632
mentalhealth,friedlizardjerkey,2020/01/12,"Mental health and work driving So a bit of blurb , tldr at the end. 

I have a few conditions , depression, anxiety and ocd tendencies. 

In the last year I've joined a fantastic job and my issues went into the background.  However the job is primarily based by travelling and driving, and my anxiety has shifted to being around driving. 
It's getting to a crippling point where driving is becoming impossible. 

There are other methods open to travel on ocassion but cheapest option being favoured by work. Which is usually self driving. 

I haven't told work about my issues , but I am currently medicated. I'm planning a doctor's appointment, but in the mean time is there anything people would shout out to help regain control ? 

Would informing work be a good or bad move ? I've been there under a year.

Are there avenues open that I may not have considered ?

I apologise , just a vent. 
Tldr. Work has brought issues back up , which is crippling my abillity to continue in the job.  Work doesn't know yet, and I'm currently medicated to no affect. 
Random shout out of options ?",4.49328205128205,7.068029123076926,5.51807692307692,74.79608974358976,73.15384615384616,8.846153846153848,32.371794871794876,9.444778638647367,3.615564102564103,849,42,137,22,18,279,116,195,0.084,0.847,0.069,0.2462,6,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,8,11,4,0,0,14,0,21,4,0,2,0,29,29,11,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,3,4,2,0,1,5,12,0,1,3,2,0,10,4,2,0,0,4,2,9,2,22,19,2,36,0,1,0,0,4,15,0,5,11,93,14,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18356772577015695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873276981169248,0.10680704525543497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225670274062936,0.10017773319351664,0.0,0.1325077492213756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309863594560341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345670262640994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333802543701988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280393334287858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626607906588983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06268425057850183,0.0,0.0,0.10063297382573383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275324226294187,0.0,0.0,0.08041961920163526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3756817624230516,0.3571829306481902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593750479103695,0.09779917146200758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069266897364326,0.0,0.2417331151135151,0.12091095024972888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751904549916387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317856408908918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341925233309408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516461293653305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996091509282072,0.0,0.0,0.11464539620388753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13214028696118654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122204557616623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5240783090073484,0.0,0.0,0.17045975443220085,0.0,0.0,0.15452551613936955
mentalhealth,TurnedCynical,2020/01/12,"I'm a fucking idiot I started going to therapy and just keep playing games with my therapist. Lying, exaggerating on purpose etc. What the fuck is wrong with me? It feels like I can't take it seriously, and even worse, it almost feels like the idea that I'm a lost cause gives me some kind of sick satisfaction. Fuck me.",3.7847619047619037,5.463734142857145,5.2446349206349225,79.90314285714291,72.65079365079364,8.214603174603175,26.885714285714286,8.841846274778883,2.0250533333333336,253,9,50,5,5,85,48,63,0.34299999999999997,0.518,0.138,-0.9557,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,2,11,4,0,4,0,2,4,0,1,0,12,15,2,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,3,2,0,1,1,7,0,0,1,2,6,4,5,14,2,3,0,1,0,3,2,1,3,2,3,28,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927511243834109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19774045335188453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21467744906583855,0.12713795787924073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19465765178492045,0.2750300664571124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5338622484959507,0.0,0.18465413421443205,0.10939661332656203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172979993133725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17109412903335602,0.0,0.2004489161149296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880819717037081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21012578559387604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13624555022678556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14472867037048429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22012931280363893,0.22349595169654415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961639528309756,0.0,0.2104578097877863,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seadork,2020/01/12,"What can I expect from a “mental health screener?” (26 f, USA, NJ) I have debilitating depression and anxiety that’s reached its peak. I called the suicide hotline last night and have had 3 different follow ups with 3 different people: all of them have urged me to go to a “screener.” They explained the process to me vaguely as a crisis center for mental health that would evaluate me, but no one will tell me the approximate cost, if signing myself up for evaluation means I’m consenting to being held for an indefinite period of time, etc. Is it like being inpatient at a psychiatric unit? Will I be slapped with a bill for thousands of dollars? Will I have a say in how long I’m there?
I’m sorry if these are dumb questions, but the last thing I want is to create more financial or emotional distress. I know I need help, but I don’t want to make everything worse.",6.2112574850299405,6.510245604790419,6.962520958083832,74.8892904191617,66.0059880239521,10.51233532934132,34.065269461077854,10.355215969177356,3.5170603592814373,684,29,128,16,10,227,113,167,0.159,0.7490000000000001,0.092,-0.9269,2,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,2,0,2,4,1,1,11,0,17,2,0,2,1,25,30,10,1,7,6,0,0,1,0,4,2,1,0,0,7,4,0,1,4,0,3,2,2,3,0,2,2,1,16,1,21,21,3,13,0,1,0,0,8,5,1,5,7,88,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12713275096708154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16969570916164792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431367894132336,0.0,0.0,0.3472604998190372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186938228640434,0.0,0.0,0.18534265445549725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493583370115737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444801394192227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35329843867380645,0.0,0.0,0.1113917751928826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133213739854984,0.27092949282019496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119067010177214,0.0,0.0,0.1470704398967316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093124458128843,0.0,0.0,0.1810265771735197,0.0,0.0,0.3349552142197097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322570095742255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595542672240864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261274576652293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11521327760390833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861676945665556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215872946190682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18603296129494065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181781820439548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452549353311079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040738935639907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690509111673797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19604302931520626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16935895169420248,0.11805461673188072,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stevenchamp45,2020/01/12,"Mental disability categorized by schizotypal personality and flipping between manic and depressive I'm looking for the term for this mental disability, I know it exists but I forgot what it's called. The effected person when put under a high amount of stress begins to suddenly change from normal, to incredibly manic and eccentric, delusional even (thinks they're on top of the world, extreme confidence, no empathy, very odd and outgoing behavior), and then to manic depressed (severe anxiety, stress, paranoia, existential terror and dread, sense of purposeless, etc.)

What is this called?",10.383719298245614,12.163032863157895,10.086052631578953,50.951535087719314,57.21052631578947,13.912280701754387,41.09649122807018,13.023866798666859,6.718859649122808,482,24,58,18,6,157,72,95,0.278,0.64,0.083,-0.9724,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,2,6,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,13,7,9,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,1,1,2,0,13,6,3,11,0,2,1,0,4,5,0,0,5,38,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121951138955668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3769971930980604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19528372879247846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31799370829379203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20587927896428507,0.1219274367711636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950414393779869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145206266264707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15501862330597233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720694418210116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18087010782183588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223735201109623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855753228487212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085469570621299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4229203972753709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828507773199373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523154294192431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AdeptFriendship8,2020/01/12,"whata so about 2 years ago (17 now) i learned about life insurance and did some research, when i looked it up i saw you could get it at 20 but it wouldn't pay out for suicide until 2yrs after starting the policy. idrk the laws and everything but i set myself a date a month or so after my 22nd bday where I'd kms. i figure that the contract for a lot of them might be different so i'll make it look like an accident (car wreck or something) i'm also currently in the process of getting off anti depressants and out of therapy that i've been doing for the past 4 or so years because i hear that raises the premiums. one good thing is that is has inspired me to live a healthier life, i've started working out, eating better, getting a job and socializing more because if i have 60-70 more years of life than feeling bad/looking bad/whatever negative things in my life won't matter that much in 20 years, where if i have much less time then i have to act fast and try my best. i might live a little longer because there are some things i wanna experience like living out on my own and living in a big city, so i might live longer than that or maybe it'll cause a change in my life in a way where i feel good about living longer. also i'm not sad enough to just kill myself out a fit of emotion because i never really feel strong emotions but if think about it everyday and am conscious of why i'm doing it i feel like it's a good thing. life insurance thing gives me some peace of mind. my beneficiaries would probably be my sister and brother since they'd be starting their lives around that time so it would help them with college/getting a house/starting a family, also depending on the amounts my parents bc they're pretty set for life but they'd use the extra cash to help others/donate to charity. obviously i haven't done a lot of research because it gives me some anxiety that i'm not going to be able to do it but i'm hoping i am. i'd love to talk to a person i know IRL about this but i'm not really friends with anyone so i'm posting here",4.427029193899781,4.773646854117646,5.541830065359477,83.36638344226581,69.87058823529411,8.649237472766885,28.211328976034856,8.626192665926032,1.8965224400871457,1623,53,340,25,27,540,208,425,0.095,0.732,0.174,0.9891,4,0,1,0,0,2,26.0,0,1,5,4,24,16,1,0,24,0,31,9,0,4,2,67,61,34,2,9,17,3,4,3,1,8,7,1,0,1,25,16,1,0,10,0,2,3,8,3,0,1,4,8,37,13,51,42,16,53,0,2,3,1,19,23,0,18,26,226,62,6,0.07010767918961144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062146227546283135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16819525715617628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05363218268689632,0.0,0.0,0.04902091937411029,0.0,0.0,0.06241069816988876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707396744721893,0.21368495259017495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357368400941522,0.062004545003092736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201989857676416,0.07416462863608975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055975277119128766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06038364135622368,0.0,0.0,0.07324760309426452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174449667728712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173765821226953,0.0,0.1577234057053411,0.0,0.07243997356681647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300826148637248,0.06857876285635298,0.06609128051630171,0.0,0.14179419639332427,0.050084940021235085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05416501903227627,0.0,0.14651347515529098,0.13450734831924416,0.03984380971555712,0.17640898520380888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901644971761505,0.0,0.09398339910868853,0.0,0.0,0.06963274427899828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957105380332627,0.0,0.07756375970646755,0.0,0.03852934700840436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34663388999410616,0.10275321232914876,0.07026631249616222,0.4333445560965632,0.0,0.17661838034723368,0.0,0.0,0.11920608354534955,0.06327491765516872,0.0,0.0467974202541164,0.0,0.07043258685851468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22311950578651046,0.07078877052872,0.0,0.05595928066287336,0.0,0.10307442179463996,0.0,0.054071364192355836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04750677781987913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778462810555993,0.0,0.06692571263573689,0.0,0.06121532128912166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714377711116143,0.07132471390146436,0.0755879357849979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898255489971785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05799379669841327,0.0,0.0,0.07146595006558383,0.0,0.053972316591470816,0.0,0.0,0.19849030469060586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668642209665405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634989690092122,0.0,0.0,0.08017424109814694,0.0,0.2328821342613325,0.044922170000689834,0.0,0.0,0.0817607030529677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047598512180820236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060550525138357535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05564821249685598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326127591669171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05103922542846636,0.0,0.0,0.09960496761743436,0.0,0.0,0.18058818731023224
mentalhealth,youthfullylame,2020/01/12,"Sometimes I can’t get out of bed, but it’s not cause I feel sad. I’ve noticed that I’ve slowly started getting into the habit of lying in bed all day. I’d also eat meals in bed as well. 

A while back ago I used to feel really depressed and helpless after graduating high school and not immediately going to college. Now I’m trying to start a business and I’ve been really stressed out. 

I’m not feeling sad right now, but I’m feeling lazy and unmotivated. And I’ve just noticed that I haven’t showered in 2 days and I’ve been spending my days in bed. I forced myself to go out last night to a friend’s bday party but haven’t gotten out of bed since I got back. It’s 3:10 pm here and I’m still in bed with no motivation to get up and I smell like ass. 

What’s wrong with me?",0.5568907563025219,2.4847058095238133,2.9438795518207317,91.55798319327734,83.16666666666667,5.381512605042016,20.596638655462183,6.522977012572876,0.15250798319327696,608,18,139,6,17,209,94,168,0.23199999999999998,0.664,0.105,-0.976,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,9,9,0,1,4,0,5,3,1,3,1,30,23,14,0,0,7,0,4,1,1,0,0,0,7,0,5,15,2,0,5,0,1,2,7,6,1,0,4,5,10,3,24,19,1,30,0,4,0,1,1,13,1,0,16,74,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057962221642625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682360428072936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438903773804248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629146375207834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30683044838436635,0.0,0.13659251454302945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227618776475708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207495506724037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252550498309925,0.0,0.2485686959631682,0.0,0.18025962117506494,0.0,0.12683814896260706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755803621194584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292712406079601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747859814444949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882507830426073,0.0,0.0,0.36110936423011053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20319240993352425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354341803605897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605005831042268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118649920765413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15684862344960948,0.0,0.22450028866392213,0.0,0.12664941848254754,0.0,0.1816632185125144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767155344160344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697001869690514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259059980932284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17339222811419944,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,boldbe2uty1,2020/01/12,"What’s wrong with me? So I hold down a full time job, every morning I have trouble leaving the house because it means I have to get “ready”. I essentially feel like a zombie. And on the weekends I isolate myself. I don’t want to do anything, I have trouble taking care of myself. I have no excuse. I drive, I have money. I don’t feel anxious. I just feel incredible “lazy” or apathetic. I don’t know what is wrong with me. I lack any kind of motivation. Like my birthday was on Friday, my husband was going to take me out but I decided not to go out. My mom wants to see me and it’s now Sunday and I’m having trouble leaving. 
I’m on Cipralex 10mg because I used to have panic issues but not anymore. I don’t feel depressed, I’m quite content. Ugh. This sucks! I know I can force myself but I feel zoned out all the time.",-0.2143974630021148,2.0198103720930263,2.3463002114164944,92.16582452431291,90.6279069767442,4.290063424947147,21.190274841437642,5.852544927426893,0.14347906976744218,632,23,136,5,22,217,94,172,0.225,0.708,0.067,-0.9781,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,3,13,1,1,5,0,16,0,0,2,1,31,38,8,0,3,7,2,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,1,10,1,1,3,7,9,0,0,2,6,30,4,17,36,3,16,0,1,1,0,3,8,1,1,7,89,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343642379194597,0.0,0.0,0.17183503588669982,0.15084700800161835,0.0,0.0,0.12516922233935393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854432480041964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508089673766995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100757030017354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815478471510186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845435770130237,0.10866364057283938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946843700223111,0.0,0.1728892324178983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755084220229016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875780702211684,0.1509404619742598,0.0,0.0,0.15839365677006448,0.1671855497102465,0.0,0.0,0.3221138672868211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14862136372737048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656866283816971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17814320679046944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17846211319221802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617820899993389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120776678208905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22872763578633176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738696793414366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13136963920375094,0.0,0.0,0.17943060655583176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326052615719114,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NuclearMask,2020/01/12,"I don't know. I find it difficult to build any kind of relationship.  
I haven't had a relationship for a while.

It is difficult for me to describe myself.  
However, I can say what I do.

I am a computer science student, I worked in a retirement home for a year.

I am a 195 cm 21 year old man.  
My weight fluctuates between 125 kg and 135 kg.

It may be a good time to get the big cannons out.

Shortly before the first semester exams, I became an epileptic.  
At the time, of course, I couldn't take an exam.  
I had up to 6 seizures a day.  
I am currently taking the maximum medication for my weight, which I have ironically because of my medication side effects.  
Before I was 90 kg.

I don't have any friends I can reach now.  
And I've had the friends I have for years.  
They are extremely important to me, but I simply cannot visit them.

When my epilepsy started, my girlfriend at the time saved my life by pulling me back on my bag. Otherwise a car would have run over me.  
A few months later she cheated on me, which is why I now have problems trusting people.  
She had a child and it is more than painful to be unable to see him.

I now spend pretty much every day, because all day, alone in my dark room.

I was advised to go to a therapist but I am afraid to take more medication.  
I don't feel like ""I"" since the beginning of epyilepsy.  
I don't want to make it worse.

  
Even though I hate being alone I can't bring myself to be a human.  
It feel's like I kinda want to be Unhappy.  
I don't know.

I am just tired.",0.9987385344738726,2.9660401693290765,3.352214778934353,89.0123332989797,81.81150159744409,6.850211274863446,24.15428218076884,7.941651935203635,1.321998536535092,1155,44,256,22,31,398,163,313,0.163,0.784,0.053,-0.9848,2,2,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,2,3,8,15,2,1,22,0,39,8,0,2,1,23,56,8,0,5,3,0,4,2,3,2,6,1,2,3,9,4,2,0,6,0,1,6,9,7,0,1,6,6,50,8,34,42,5,41,0,0,1,0,16,13,0,2,24,174,59,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23416351707754005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15375056965982858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869255411797714,0.0,0.13782381474036492,0.0,0.19238796066425226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187163188865004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466594146742339,0.0,0.09524628961560176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431909932173084,0.16152043957929074,0.0,0.0,0.1033221684605933,0.0961570303522002,0.0,0.0,0.17467840992131772,0.0,0.059061967782477666,0.0,0.06424675418440984,0.0948177796352058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116097073091475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339454448144508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772020950707418,0.12425445778435495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984786624651967,0.11045731522324273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754592087703102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3416464261364778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023238929083298,0.0,0.08310195595019564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862295861704054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12028911511778545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837199339681335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150086147387542,0.0,0.10816993535749483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427386006013744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989886659008171,0.0,0.0,0.09008317624856298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351297547354777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001467420211811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549899953750569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13125533810626838,0.0,0.0,0.11106730642356807,0.0,0.1977544251599597,0.12992996413591798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335514203322546,0.0,0.0,0.2753196060139245,0.0,0.0,0.10200660208516382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229897174177657,0.0,0.11520372408378575,0.08030476899357326,0.0,0.0,0.21839411745932785
mentalhealth,knighthawk562,2020/01/12,"My life is a constant downward spiral My entire life I felt there was something wrong with me. Like I have some type of learning deficiency or something like that. In December I got diagnosed with ADHD, GAD, and bipolar disorder. When I learned of this diagnosis I was in a way relieved but also sad that I confirmed my suspicion. I told my mom about this and she was cool at first but now she believes that the diagnosis is not true and im just lazy. Since getting the diagnosis, I started seeing a therapist and doing group therapy sessions. I’ve done them for 2 months and I dont seem to get better. I’ve tried two different types of medications and they’re not working. I haven’t told my dad about my diagnosis because he is the sole reason for my GAD and making me feel like shit every day. I don’t know what to do at this point. Im 19 with $100, with no car, no job or any ambition to do anything with my life. Everyone and everything is against me. My dad keeps pressuring me to take a test to get EMT certified and I cant even fucking concentrate on studying or anything. I fucking hate my life and I just want to end it.",2.199318181818178,4.3736994342105255,4.029888357256779,84.62906698564593,78.78070175438597,7.4787878787878785,27.90749601275917,8.438071523408619,2.1641596491228072,893,40,180,19,22,301,131,228,0.157,0.772,0.07200000000000001,-0.9719,2,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,3,9,14,4,1,7,1,16,10,1,2,1,36,35,17,0,1,9,3,2,3,0,0,7,0,0,0,8,15,0,1,7,0,0,1,8,7,0,2,8,4,31,7,24,27,1,17,0,1,1,2,10,7,3,5,11,115,39,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570778867306575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695616255986148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244784931446279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995415696699116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390721956217247,0.0,0.0,0.13659677727688607,0.0,0.10722756716953036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13101815025007105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819023648526008,0.0,0.0,0.12305678197606815,0.0,0.12667075099745653,0.13895237261936366,0.0,0.0,0.12407135373905627,0.14209322466575738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738329462404812,0.0,0.0,0.08007835424153296,0.0,0.10215053838646793,0.11585070669841308,0.10896334438755002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06130295253862592,0.08661439689688889,0.11641010738021634,0.0,0.0,0.10312729723922202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241701899488112,0.1900298215760433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696728191377448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970011364010122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26192157219084045,0.0,0.12031271005019199,0.10776432547700014,0.0,0.0,0.06663073076555517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425436333115319,0.17769627978657446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092912420224539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12213727347806028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199566972074154,0.0967731885741208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11461167191246566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12465565608910473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661315932086928,0.11037300094080876,0.0,0.0,0.12445186011432045,0.10029157911867624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866740640486412,0.0,0.0,0.08581480792114059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115793527092722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864933324144005,0.1407698242919999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23170141339682615,0.0,0.08231449261959803,0.0,0.11843456962459176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151091979685101,0.09623524280475394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826469047774964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255769815880702,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lislger,2020/01/12,"Is a baseline of low-key boredom and exhaustion a sign of a mental health issue? I have noticed when I take various mild drugs literally all activities are bearable, but I don't even want to wash my hair, for example, sober. It's like 20 minutes to dry it and 20 minutes to straighten it. How is that not boring and tedious?

I think of activities to do in my limited free time but am way too exhausted to do them. 

The weather here is grey and rainy and won't be clearing up until May. This boredom and exhaustion sure do sound like the same language as depression, but I always go back to assuming it is a normal reaction to never getting any time off work that doesn't involve cooking large meals and hosting family (holidays), which itself is more exhausting than just working.

I guess I'm wondering if a general state of boredom and exhaustion are within the realm of normal or if this does indeed sound like depression or something else.",8.354332712600872,7.479207921787715,8.64711359404097,68.49135319677221,61.96089385474861,12.201365611421476,40.559279950341406,11.429527900616536,4.810422222222223,754,37,130,19,9,250,116,179,0.19,0.706,0.10400000000000001,-0.9472,0,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,3,7,13,0,0,8,0,17,11,1,1,4,34,25,19,0,5,9,0,1,3,0,2,8,2,0,0,10,8,2,1,3,2,1,1,5,8,0,0,0,4,9,6,20,22,4,13,0,2,1,0,2,4,0,8,9,92,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15226890977341065,0.0,0.0,0.1244448450728816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407140868346244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31523164068727577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601426926696547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21221946227297409,0.0,0.15287126097903125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086838492621307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17251413068458005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956088481057554,0.0,0.10400192192593016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20159281466396206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19451820690533836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910022598878376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26821058635168793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844188383854356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113925945606073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3585981694158876,0.0,0.2083443183812555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14088072140641802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724733520201355,0.0,0.1375916440062233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725766312278404,0.0,0.0,0.21341509048026056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793690083044187,0.14525521260974789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984534128858201,0.2664492966945737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HelpDiagnoseMe,2020/01/12,"Help Diagnose Me Yes, I know no one here is a doctor, so no one here can give me a real diagnosis. But I want suggestions of what I could have to look into for myself. Thank you. 


Please help diagnose me. 

I form “romantic” feelings with everyone I come into contact with and get very jealous for no reason if they’re interested in others. Even if I’m only friends with the person and no flirting has even been ensued, I get pissed. 
I hate being questioned, pitied, coddled, and doubted. They piss me off to the extreme. My boyfriend trying to hold me when I’m upset pisses me off. When a family member died, it pissed me off when people coddled me and acted like I couldn’t handle myself. 
I want to rip scalps off people when they disagree with me. I seriously get VERY mad. I start shaking sometimes even if it’s a simple comment from someone on the internet. I’ll fantasize about killing them or hurting them and their family. Even if it’s a kid. 
I’ve cheated on every single partner I’ve had. Even if it was only online. I flirt with everyone. I take attention from everyone. But do anything I don’t like and I’ll want to fucking kill you. 
What is wrong with me? Is there a name?",1.9289743589743584,4.356545264957269,3.743305982905984,84.89613846153848,81.39316239316237,6.3081025641025645,24.317264957264968,7.554174236665415,1.4248210598290596,928,35,175,15,25,311,128,234,0.266,0.615,0.12,-0.9913,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,5,0,14,25,11,3,9,1,14,9,5,1,0,37,32,19,3,10,8,0,1,2,2,0,3,0,0,3,7,15,0,1,5,0,0,3,6,18,0,2,3,2,34,7,26,26,2,17,0,2,1,1,19,9,5,8,7,125,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813371085727414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272448996930428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521250976719599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420752464049001,0.12376408741031013,0.0,0.0,0.12205882312215698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3938220028069627,0.0,0.10047441657911428,0.3418493631946374,0.0,0.0,0.2248391438346062,0.0,0.06029707222484415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921333072219586,0.11024596348343743,0.18691174571445465,0.11439677367161374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177360322560577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15986334978826386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766105048462162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638679291543427,0.0,0.06553743040081768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652038466528053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014111067932284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616156196085181,0.18139207043585465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16534775988580158,0.1041256904139692,0.0,0.1309021860389914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335888184932596,0.0,0.0,0.1357341585162386,0.0,0.12261026242910808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104129286700346,0.0,0.1179426472359162,0.0,0.08440672850009719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966218394514493,0.0,0.0,0.10979063310537364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096384759784611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19678972694183847,0.21101263074428156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303826450252054,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bonzoed1826,2020/01/12,"Better Help Hello!
Anyone ever use the website Better Help? I’ve heard about it, it’s an online tool where you get linked up with a counselor and can have counseling via email, live messaging, or video chat. It’s not too expensive either...almost sounds too good to be true honestly and was curious if anyone has ever used it, did you find it helpful, is it a trustworthy website?",4.260416666666668,6.314633097222228,5.151111111111113,79.50500000000002,72.19444444444444,8.133333333333335,25.88888888888889,8.841846274778883,2.1836222222222217,301,10,52,6,6,98,57,72,0.0,0.657,0.34299999999999997,0.9804,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,2,6,5,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,2,3,13,11,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,2,5,4,7,0,4,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,2,2,33,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22985480931663546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32100451636118993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4060254119066013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4152707485386905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097987388012608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992708376625333,0.0,0.0,0.19253032412873752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4615748127849061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20269124957788426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39650402900684706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwawayforobvreass,2020/01/12,"Bpd or something else? Please help. 
Hello! I am an 19 year old male. I may or may not have Borderline Personality Disorder. I have some of the symptoms but the thing that troubles me is that what symptoms I do have seem to have reasonable explanations, which makes me believe perhaps I do not have BPD. I will list some examples below. I’m not asking for a diagnosis, but if someone could tell me their opinion it would be greatly appreciated. Also I am not in a financial situation to go to a psychologist or therapist, sorry. 

antisocial behavior: I am rather antisocial, but I do talk to my mates in class as well as make small talk with people. I am more of a relaxed go with the flow sort of guy rather than “anti social” Because I don’t actively avoid people

Self harm: I self harmed in year 7 but to be completely honest it was very much for attention and because many of my “friends” did it

An intense fear of abandonment, even going to extreme measures to avoid real or imagined separation or rejection: without I doubt I have this, however, last year I lost my entire friend group (they ghosted me and decided to hang out without me instead) which honestly traumatized me a lot and leads me to imagine that everyone is the same as them and wishes to leave me because I’m “annoying”

Ongoing feelings of emptiness: yes, but I am a teenager so is that not normal? 

Symptoms I do not have: 

Inappropriate, intense anger

Impulsive and risky behavior

Rapid changes in self-identity and self-image

Do I NOT have BPD due to the fact all my “symptoms” have reasonable expectations? Please help.",4.587060810810812,6.788958881756757,5.850572972972972,74.20523783783787,71.66891891891892,9.330594594594595,33.461621621621624,9.791249743138472,3.723296648648649,1263,64,218,34,25,422,163,296,0.17800000000000002,0.667,0.155,-0.8785,1,2,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,3,2,7,19,2,4,13,1,32,4,0,5,2,62,44,22,1,8,22,0,1,0,3,4,4,0,0,5,12,9,0,3,8,1,0,6,10,12,1,0,3,1,33,7,33,34,7,19,0,3,0,0,20,7,0,15,6,161,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429322070435658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685027371403259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16989550420338945,0.0,0.0,0.1046680711550434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35101820555001256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827736911632644,0.0,0.0974053565242334,0.0,0.0,0.07417421312547841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647305971944528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760720375057929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061360502398542516,0.0,0.0,0.08877127450446386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453990972422332,0.04697374217929587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355079143583832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15839402959719048,0.0,0.0,0.10242412793482623,0.0,0.0919869977426786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453970814487432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572704516388258,0.0,0.09836917490494586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141285880315304,0.07898145307908361,0.0,0.0,0.12402481960969833,0.0941874440929402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829322268212898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09102365290968864,0.0,0.0,0.09748439775474922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881227489515704,0.08111792422537663,0.0,0.20395569173815548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574213857830388,0.0,0.19103623586909954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457395076496492,0.38766570943586415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442507260642953,0.0,0.09470128392750543,0.07871505971133601,0.07152004098544178,0.0,0.1039955179136016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862405280189554,0.0,0.14934126198007902,0.08119992351955369,0.0,0.0,0.10786569258227444,0.06171956602574195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665338925934763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352952088123454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10683203191836466,0.17910728011523175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599449325358646,0.0,0.0,0.17947637845077452
mentalhealth,frs-1122,2020/01/12,"Medication question if you were prescribed with Klonopin/clonazepam please tell me what and why you were prescribed it for. just wanna know what it did to you/what your experiences are like. my psych told me it's to make me sleep better/calm me down before sleeping... I just don't really know what it can do to me. I get extremely paranoid about sleeping, and will pull endless all-nighters/make myself stay up until I pass out.",5.264814814814816,6.906173938271607,4.825617283950617,84.5102777777778,68.87654320987653,7.375308641975309,29.549382716049386,7.793537801064563,1.835656790123456,343,13,64,4,6,104,57,81,0.031,0.9059999999999999,0.064,0.3626,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,8,4,3,1,0,12,13,4,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,0,13,1,11,8,0,7,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,2,2,44,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850107126575692,0.0,0.0,0.19229271872795045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21268113097176555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359439242109452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389796711414993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622175388280984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513134754346865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21903050675376312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23866484526460185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435631952340193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928655574391058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6527391916075548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23174368033247436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900370322312148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20775671728494188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19619017824601245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,c4esar_,2020/01/12,MMPI-2-RF Does anyone have the link for the original MMPI-2-RF test? I have seen some posts about it on Reddit but the links are broken since they were posted like 2 years ago. Thanks.,4.73901960784314,7.183199176470591,2.712352941176473,95.8022549019608,71.94117647058823,5.7098039215686285,20.15686274509804,6.42735559955562,-0.05565490196078393,148,3,29,1,3,40,30,34,0.10099999999999999,0.685,0.214,0.5574,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,1,0,5,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,2,3,4,1,6,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,4,15,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31548663365177354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488557301460533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114532105436771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17387628251710285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6817135986473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29440673095469355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276677672220173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22918993453524825
mentalhealth,coping1,2020/01/12,"I feel like there’s two of me That’s it, I just feel like I’m not one person. Like if I talk to myself I feel like There’s another me listening I can’t stand it.",-3.0838461538461535,-1.5070169487179468,0.560384615384617,102.6221153846154,103.10256410256409,4.651282051282052,11.628205128205128,6.42735559955562,-1.0653794871794866,125,2,35,2,6,45,24,39,0.061,0.722,0.217,0.6586,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,1,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,4,8,4,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,21,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27410362503208463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3965193256738399,0.5602386317292137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5108328110575233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771333005649238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228246839770872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21010566665661398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553525495879114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jadenmasu,2020/01/12,"Homicidal Thoughts I’ve been very depressed for a long time and my suicidal thoughts continue but are becoming more homicidal. At school I always feel like everyone’s watching me and talking shit about me, especially people I’m attracted to. I find myself stuck in thoughts of having intimate moments with the ones I’m attracted to and then butchering them. I mean fucked up shit like cutting their heads off and doing weird dancing shit in the blood or luring them somewhere to stab them to death. Please help if anyone knows how to keep this shit at bay, I don’t want these increasingly dark thoughts to ever become plans or harm anyone.",11.243589743589745,9.117708572649576,9.571897435897435,68.11476923076924,57.2905982905983,13.120683760683761,43.05811965811966,11.602472056035307,4.946881709401708,521,23,88,11,5,159,85,117,0.32299999999999995,0.537,0.14,-0.9869,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,4,1,3,13,6,0,3,0,5,7,6,1,1,21,18,10,2,2,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,8,1,0,2,1,9,0,1,6,2,12,4,16,12,2,14,0,1,1,1,6,6,5,3,8,51,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617517088773315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952513463037304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083990292315236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025465270803347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262944422898783,0.0,0.1334130611337814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059615593030326,0.09974468138853856,0.0,0.0,0.12761031111998214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907660258762066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432905806482447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358446067753548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410082728568002,0.0,0.0,0.07673159715939226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642273067944674,0.0,0.0,0.12355946186790767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520873023501879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461024442538772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679504998266572,0.0,0.0,0.1532610257222168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14130307173278858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5732724156743388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527218108999368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222140847680667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4433712949945574,0.08141364722273328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520126712672853,0.08235159703795666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TrashFromKz,2020/01/12,"Had another breakdown today, wish I just disappeared never existing for all the people I ever interacted with But at the same time still trying to socialize and forget all the past",8.353750000000002,9.544301875000002,9.087500000000002,58.4075,61.5,12.65,34.75,12.161744961471696,5.2117625,148,6,20,5,2,50,28,32,0.113,0.8059999999999999,0.081,-0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,4,11,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,4,1,3,8,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,6,19,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3574978896657248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30839334194779144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629484832192836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32545904636940004,0.23635995699353246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3475381738977276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27226946769068777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988007254471992,0.0,0.3231645408075076,0.0,0.0,0.2314710710259956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3920560286713128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cloud_dreaming_x,2020/01/12,"Have a hard time letting people get close to me. Hey all! I’m not really sure if I’m asking for something but this has been in my mind heavily. 

I don’t understand why I don’t allow people to get close (as in getting to know each other better) to me. I’ve honestly lost potential relationships and even friendships behind a lack of communication . My mom and sister worry that I’ll end up alone. I’ve been doing it for so long I couldn’t tell you when it started but I’m sure it started in my childhood years. 

I’m just feeling extremely sad over the whole thing. Sometimes I hate myself for it but I start feeling uncomfortable when I start to let people in.

Any words of advise would be nice. Thank you...",1.5158098591549276,3.9707479577464784,3.4106866197183088,86.41701584507044,83.50704225352112,6.085211267605634,21.551056338028168,7.413659706084162,0.9462943661971835,558,18,110,9,16,187,92,142,0.19699999999999998,0.6759999999999999,0.128,-0.8988,0,1,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,2,5,9,1,0,3,0,12,0,0,1,3,24,31,10,0,4,6,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,3,14,6,18,23,4,19,0,2,0,0,9,8,0,1,11,71,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543314959250642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133327219831068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930610810174174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178900773639252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319804059677425,0.0,0.0,0.09842102292565882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068989252742104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335578647068931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348548616797976,0.1471185033753616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189310010605641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047497388385243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13187093393585714,0.0,0.0,0.1626642043507585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045964495657316,0.17452105749796998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30991848253340704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546090509271854,0.0,0.0,0.1599831255402681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147167203383169,0.14737668165799309,0.0,0.42188585206397977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2808840995699871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13024305900190225,0.13719023240028494,0.0,0.0,0.09899695382750892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689009754561536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15512675080187735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13446015579637102,0.16636658034780752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15132892273763934,0.0,0.10585385190119877,0.0,0.0,0.0959588446836526
mentalhealth,Da_Clicker,2020/01/12,"Why do I suddenly feel emotions I often suppress or don't feel a lot of my emotion but recently after some trouble in my relationships I'm feeling emotions more. In general, I think that emotion is something that isn't necessary (for me anyway) so I tried my best to stop feeling it ( I think I did a decent job as I'm seen as a sociopath bu friends) and I dislike spending time processing my emotions. The only time I show emotion is when I'm with a girlfriend and that's just to keep them at ease and I don't know if that emotion is real at all I doubt it is anyway. These sudden upbursts are annoying me so I want to eliminate what's causing them if I can. I don't talk with my friends as often so it might be something to do with that and my current girlfriend has said she's only with me out of pity so that might've done something to me but I don't know and any input would be appreciated.  Can you guys help me think of anything that might be causing these emotions as it is rather inconvenient?",3.2073058252427167,4.621355786407769,4.668143203883496,84.52609830097089,73.66019417475728,7.0917475728155335,30.83616504854369,7.645422480735847,2.006777669902913,796,37,160,10,16,266,101,206,0.107,0.765,0.128,0.6741,2,0,3,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,2,1,11,7,1,1,5,0,24,0,0,2,1,43,40,19,0,5,7,0,4,0,4,3,0,1,0,1,14,10,0,3,9,1,1,0,5,4,0,0,4,6,29,3,23,30,5,14,0,1,1,0,13,5,0,10,9,121,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05947490424324825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197104501417018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178249314337084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796883202548948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895005987944688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7870339835556983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17688695398988896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13514072469999616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865978474488506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05862171237191285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867892488279333,0.07773729687159378,0.0,0.0,0.09613001102853257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435424563114856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27833952840233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303254052564675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995471295968892,0.0,0.0,0.08635489940973334,0.09389789617591797,0.0,0.0,0.08319323637312519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20198990348999987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311937601034729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07029597736707872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16811997994606429,0.0,0.0,0.10199572399277808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059378705534328315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05158539783181768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891785903124841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06212813984021068,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lovesadventures32,2020/01/12,"Are these mood swings normal? Hi everyone, I’m seeing a therapist tomorrow so I am already in the process of seeking help. 
These past few weeks for me have been somewhat difficult: my moods have felt like they’re all over the place. For a few days, I feel like I am on top of the world. I feel confident. I feel myself. The next few days, I feel really down. I start questioning the meaning of everything and I start feeling very hopeless about life. It’s almost as if My thoughts did a complete 180. The other evening, my day had been great and then almost like a switch I felt extremely emotional and started crying once again feeling completely lost and hopeless.
What could this be? I’m trying to wrap my head around it.",2.619376498800957,5.24484652517986,3.219683453237412,88.48400959232616,80.15107913669064,6.872134292565947,25.813429256594723,8.021203637495839,1.7640269544364509,573,23,110,11,15,179,93,139,0.11,0.723,0.16699999999999998,0.7509,0,0,0,0,0,2,17.0,0,0,0,2,5,10,0,0,10,0,11,2,1,0,1,23,28,8,0,3,1,0,8,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,11,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,8,9,15,4,13,18,5,20,0,3,1,0,3,8,0,5,15,70,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667345090212665,0.0,0.14697484993753565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185644119902435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27928746965931445,0.0,0.0,0.10633875300600988,0.0,0.14629935050775095,0.2576832352982959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981712593286406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796856796910177,0.0,0.0,0.12726561207450626,0.1196996299147886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4040592241070637,0.0951486145375216,0.2557602623170734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14683882151728855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13668799213312371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927224641705918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407371434751567,0.1952049016780912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453890306279173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14507937572130386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164558048155967,0.0,0.1304947007404566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14183950283698324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714178816080848,0.0,0.0,0.13915176796974602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14919960001951088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853228189305021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061325666957769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828107233796376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464003941537866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573537319776943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904250356720445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989298684886756,0.0,0.0,0.10683434764772284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThisMeNow,2020/01/12,"Has anybody here tried using the 'fake it till you make it' approach with regards to your mental health? How did it work out for you? How sustainable was/is it for you? Any other thoughts or comments?

I've been doing this for a few weeks now. Ended up as a sort of last resort but I think it's working pretty well. Mainly in actually getting me to do the things I need to do to get better, which I didn't have much motivation to do, and that is in turn helping me.

But it still feels sort of fragile sometimes? Just wondering about other people's experiences with this",2.8932743362831843,4.892120318584073,4.063017699115047,86.05930530973455,75.90265486725664,6.289911504424777,24.574336283185843,7.1686216300943375,1.0456874336283186,448,15,88,5,10,146,81,113,0.04,0.835,0.125,0.8991,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,4,0,4,8,3,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,5,0,20,20,8,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,13,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,4,2,9,2,19,16,3,11,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,4,6,69,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.2088501151944284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553917457597765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892810030510537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18955589736761602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093500891072319,0.0,0.0,0.1082136306250123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22363052205693834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274904939326519,0.0,0.0,0.14345135548170498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17445274984499545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428582799125294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156792071150707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573274180563997,0.15869119422791073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14837272153309433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177326418398073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21166868625612695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17091457633299384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218365432229682,0.13713371167446525,0.0,0.16990591383489048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453037697296878,0.23278948032529095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18484232297623807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17167185320365105,0.0,0.1924273498250307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320927466804483,0.3116144399920066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emilypatrese,2020/01/12,"Somewhere to go My life for the past 7 years has been horrible. I had to move back to my parents', and they've been tearing me down for the entire time, and for the past few years have been increasingly treating me like a incapable human being. My most consistent job I've had since moving back was working with family, and it was a toxic environment for me, so I quit there. I've been looking for jobs here and there and got a few but I sometimes don't have transportation, or I am talked into hurrying and getting a job that doesn't fit my skill set or needs. I'm being totally ignored my everyone including ""mental health"" people and mostly everyone is brushing me off as some ""lowlife"" or problem person, even though I grew up taking care or my siblings as well as an abusive ex that used me for a place to stay, money, food, clothes, etc, all while being a sex offender unbeknownst to me at the time. That aside, a lot else has brought me down and I feel like I've been used and no one acknowledges that, and if they do, it's for the sake of comparison. I get that everyone ""wants"" me to leave, but tbh I want to leave more that they'd even suggest. I just got a hedgehog for Christmas also, so I need somewhere to go that allows for small pets or something... I've looked into just renting a room or something but tbh I have no money at all and I'm expected to pay bills STILL for therapy and things that I didn't ask for and get calls nearly daily about them. On top of this, my parents take out their emotions on drinking and it doesn't do anyone any favors. I just really need ideas of places I can go to to stay for a while until I can get a job and/or enough money for a place.

I'm from South East Michigan, but have been thinking about moving for a while. Preferably not to anywhere in MI, but anywhere is appreciated. Thanks.",6.7230420480549204,5.727638046195657,6.970205949656751,79.58692219679634,65.27717391304347,10.029977116704806,32.955377574370715,9.134995656068208,2.617394565217391,1443,50,294,21,19,468,188,368,0.09,0.838,0.073,-0.6254,8,0,3,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,4,4,18,10,1,0,19,0,31,5,0,3,3,57,60,37,0,9,16,3,1,2,0,0,2,0,3,2,13,18,2,1,5,1,6,10,7,3,1,1,14,4,34,7,50,42,13,48,0,0,2,1,13,22,0,11,15,207,47,6,0.0,0.1048800531644596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078828355214031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0601956758749907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061894255509577015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275293147830133,0.0,0.0,0.13613066185556555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090387376225294,0.0,0.0902506008251086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671451773062436,0.0,0.0,0.0739459225579459,0.09957149822166342,0.0,0.09146336483071968,0.098721625441369,0.11693138624248935,0.0,0.0,0.25374991518728346,0.0,0.0,0.08344744765010542,0.0,0.0447576582273292,0.0632376975878051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070370290470008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849892368939731,0.0,0.1509214619286861,0.0,0.1415928037200238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409112067117452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992671233388184,0.0,0.0,0.3513641633125131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874568091124109,0.0,0.0,0.06252329713664706,0.08649142256722625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866664137777252,0.0,0.0,0.07525533881713085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920591780391146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822437537974068,0.0,0.19690623613448527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05998248670899538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965788349808181,0.0,0.16900201835971818,0.06136764400456201,0.0772910174950898,0.2774492554973287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847003348684141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941504152499235,0.0,0.0,0.05670727468909595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322349145327922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13629186870454965,0.08754714782381351,0.0,0.0,0.18869807596129312,0.07069105942937247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331099251375996,0.07114788872290996,0.0,0.08149602379977097,0.1012287208639322,0.0,0.05880781717528994,0.0567191375348989,0.08696906414816635,0.0,0.10323180205542364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529032797427246,0.0,0.0,0.10442111432635244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958884206467738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444258696112495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140061380947298
mentalhealth,thatnerdymom,2020/01/12,"Boyfriend is paranoid that I'm an investigator A little backstory:

Myself: (23F)
Boyfriend: (22M)
Been together for about 4 months.

Let me start by saying that I know this issue needs to be evaluated by a mental health professional but I am coming here to seek out the opinions of others for myself due to my boyfriend being reluctant to get help.

So my boyfriend is generally the paranoid type to get tripped up easily over things in general. But when we smoke marijuana, he gets extreme anxiety and paranoia 90% of the time. Due to this feeling he gets, we RARELY smoke. 

Examples of the anxiety are that he strongly feels a ""deja vu"" feeling like we've done this before or he's dreamed the situation before. He will also think that I'm an ""investigator"" or ""undercover psychologist"". 

I'm coming to you guys over this because last night we went out downtown to a bar for the first time ever together. We picked up a pint of liqour and drank in the parking lot and then threw it out so we didnt have an open container with us. I've done this plenty in my past (to avoid paying a ton on alcohol in the bar) but he found this is be sketchy because it's technically illegal. Anyways. We went into the bar and had a beer and hung out briefly. However, he started getting anxious thinking i was a psychologist and investigating him again. Like i was trying to trap him doing something illegal and our entire relationship was a hoax.

He even went as far as wondering if the cars that were pulling into the parking lot were watching us and that everyone was actors. At one point there was a fight outside and he believes that it was fake. He also felt everyone was glancing at hime at the bar like they were ""keeping an eye on him"". I tried to reassure him but it went nowhere really so i downed some water and drove us home. I figured the feeling would pass with sleep but today he still believes it. The marijuana and alcohol effects are no more and he is still paranoid.

This morning he is asking if i am evaluating him for my schooling (i used to be a criminal psychology major but only made it through part of my Bachelors). He said he once found a file on my phone of me interviewing my friend (an ex heroin addict) and asking him incriminating questions. However, after much digging through my files, we found the video and it was me trying to intervention my friend after i found him ODd for the first time. I wasn't asking him incriminating questions in the video, i was trying to reason with him to get clean. I recorded it to show him once he came off drugs because he was so out of it when i was talking to him. 

Opinions? Thoughts? What can cause this paranoia/anxiety? What mental health disorders could this be?",4.507469924989382,6.36167264410058,5.532833891588432,77.85427937915743,71.10831721470021,8.525527197244893,30.98499787705807,9.114032605525557,2.808825107326509,2155,95,394,45,41,710,244,517,0.109,0.818,0.073,-0.9604,2,1,7,0,1,0,58.0,11,1,1,4,17,10,1,1,34,0,41,15,2,6,1,82,84,35,0,5,10,1,5,3,2,2,6,2,2,1,29,35,9,3,19,10,1,13,3,3,0,3,36,10,52,7,65,39,8,64,0,0,3,0,59,28,0,12,26,273,81,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990217871277469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15665975654211786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722769122969848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16821102308315158,0.08280229047465072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20556230380721088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403953630792706,0.0,0.12473699646776445,0.16515633877011368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382975461248426,0.0,0.07529397596132889,0.0,0.12627400471022268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585199542504794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400222019409945,0.0,0.0,0.1500121081792283,0.0,0.0,0.08499872822062354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04841054110105167,0.06629936603466696,0.0,0.14007269383417453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482402645057236,0.05236183811011565,0.0703745268154492,0.0,0.0,0.12468908255985052,0.0,0.3214559728926535,0.11325480100792355,0.0,0.2297611277096209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257340081834247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15581794455253814,0.0,0.0,0.049127976664053725,0.0,0.07352068625089371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650075541539396,0.0,0.06514780875735884,0.0,0.0,0.040280919367921164,0.05974506545849944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494892513320414,0.0,0.10742444868641272,0.07346067057201025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246252794891256,0.0,0.06935333625226664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14772789031501546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05850323058359616,0.0,0.05388013028483628,0.054347184525655436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878222877213454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15611319452771638,0.049666470765125655,0.055744017720259706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937115368179558,0.06996820459305324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692873012480189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16421395813881978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046954542151276965,0.07535928803404743,0.0,0.07869121295652308,0.0,0.0,0.06972016356697626,0.058286987218876825,0.0,0.07417827661119307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238645499607151,0.07334775832559685,0.0,0.0,0.0564259376689339,0.0,0.0,0.10375690972406534,0.0,0.117066684932159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05891160452217278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04869382536051765,0.09392872955958108,0.0,0.05818790447769433,0.12821640682449484,0.0,0.06947492460472507,0.0,0.0,0.19904950174944955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644939522141353,0.06330319639861637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717801508556811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948511190099823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05206654123111794,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwmeintomed,2020/01/12,"Does any mental condition make you suddenly dizzy and lightheaded for a few seconds? Now I know this aint a medical sub but i'm just a bit worried bout this

I've bene diagnosed w severe depression, anxiety problems and panic disorder, but I want to ask if the above conditions can actually make me lightheaded or dizzy when standing/walking. 

Not sure if anyone here experiences it, but I initially thought it was because I'm tired. and I'm tired because I'm depressed. So does that mean it could be caused by depression?

Another theory is it's part of a mild panic attack but it doesn't make sense to me because it comes for like 5-10 seconds and disappears hmm

should definitely raise this with my psych in my next appt!",4.60918901242642,6.476988820143888,5.80724656638326,75.93427076520605,70.87050359712232,10.23440156965337,32.78024852844997,10.436869588844218,3.8860733812949633,582,28,105,18,11,194,96,139,0.35700000000000004,0.594,0.049,-0.995,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,5,9,1,2,5,0,8,4,0,4,1,27,21,13,0,6,9,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,7,0,2,2,0,8,2,8,16,3,7,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,3,5,60,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.13569313823566512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455904449014917,0.145806474979146,0.10637318018191347,0.0,0.0,0.09722727713148477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12999335941666873,0.15818991107535516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25429151108845605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180702988318867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284307041378422,0.0,0.1197796126181255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102043475438116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592917334461743,0.14113323535351982,0.0,0.0,0.1593638123222863,0.0,0.24336789510330686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601797899144402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641846679154136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793300478538652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784516777436376,0.0,0.0,0.15146665642734286,0.0,0.1400786554500396,0.1401301044932566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14788168453706327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262913832963154,0.0,0.15057803960326166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305245961164547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708737993551952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105336229464362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103904904797,0.0,0.31963597368164576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201553227678612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412124372120427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sailing_through_net,2020/01/12,I need help and advice. I have been continuously failing at a certain aspect of life even tho I'm being provided continuous support and repeated chances at it. And it's eating me from the inside knowing I'm going to fail them again. I need some advice because i don't know how to change myself and it's pushing me to the brinks of depression.,2.5442016806722703,5.018724176470588,4.683865546218488,78.78382352941179,79.29411764705883,6.8268907563025225,27.36134453781513,7.957251820313856,2.1045226890756306,276,12,49,5,7,95,48,68,0.14800000000000002,0.72,0.131,-0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,2,5,5,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,1,1,11,12,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,1,0,8,2,8,10,1,9,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,1,4,35,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5318815820628678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16589946570593886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28789748917426544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23440148023874335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784763041138439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17975180587203135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15466851229757453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182415695494278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29913187640087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922268422625117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40358997608208347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088313880492031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kayinator_55,2020/01/12,"How can i get rid of jealousy ? When i go somewhere, i see many couples kissing, hugging and i get jealous and angry then because i don’t have girlfriend, what should i do to get rid of my jealousy ?",1.7035000000000018,3.877894350000002,3.0599999999999987,90.935,80.5,4.0,32.5,3.1291,1.26275,154,9,30,0,4,50,28,40,0.252,0.603,0.145,-0.5803,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,0,4,10,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,7,2,3,9,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,2,21,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480709723672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4502788580647357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6378386698403474,0.0,0.2312772261018441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41258014949492977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3242838861775029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AkiraFromWiiSports,2020/01/12,"Tension Headaches Followed By Mental Breakdown I don't know what started it, but I have been stressed and tense through the entire day. Every little thing angers me, but it got very bad at the end of the day. My family were arguing in the middle of a shop, it was embarrassing as hell.

While they were arguing, I felt a pulling sensation on my head. (as if somone was twisting it). I lost hearing in the left ear for 5 seconds and my feet were stuck to floor. Later, as I got into the car, my brother had this small, card poster. I was putting my seatbelt on where I stabbed my finger on the corner of the poster. (It was surprisingly sharp).

I immediately started crying and completely lost it. I started smashing my head into the car seat. Episodes like this have happened lots of times, how can I work through it?",3.8326923076923087,5.78067226923077,4.218205128205128,86.19346153846153,73.1025641025641,6.851282051282053,29.948717948717945,7.61054688173877,1.8524256410256408,638,28,124,8,13,200,97,156,0.28,0.687,0.033,-0.9933,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,3,2,12,4,3,11,0,13,5,5,1,0,12,26,11,0,1,3,1,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,11,5,0,0,2,1,1,5,1,10,0,1,15,5,19,2,20,11,1,29,1,2,0,0,5,15,1,2,10,85,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143681310727435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760625893819276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860712216016345,0.21849007627993572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500326977398388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272164868246234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15968947314643453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16264468803629795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27095951840473764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14979444748115636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476939793131543,0.0,0.1909192124397616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930944456875918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840469448210832,0.0,0.0,0.08275729270569578,0.16977716780184365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3698268576384524,0.14401261806776028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17070918783976455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028763497243646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35969357757677217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940401157009827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253776605595237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877493288536067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976769026966945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332076114735828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway208282,2020/01/12,"How to get better? How can I possibly get better when I don't feel any motivation to do so? Like, part of me just doesn't have the will to even try anymore. I don't know what to do with myself, I feel like I'm bound to constantly be this way. I have no faith in any kind of therapy either so that just makes things worse. I've been going through therapy for a long time now but I feel like I've just declined in my mental state. I don't think I'm lazy as such, I just find it incredibly hard to even get out of bed in the morning, unless I'm going to work, I feel no absolute need and end up sleeping in until 11am or until I get hungry enough that I want to get up. I generally don't have breakfast either because I just am not motivated to do so, some days i could even pass eating lunch. I feel like I'm never going to excel in life because of this way that I am, I really want to change, but I obviously don't want it enough to motivate myself. Does anyone else feel like this? Like they don't want to change enough to actually go through with it?

I guess you could say I'm slightly scared of change, but at the same time, I do want it. I know I do. 

I'm just entirely fed up of being stuck here. I know the only person who can help me is myself but every time I try to do things differently, like wake up earlier or something like that, my brain always tells me ""oh it doesn't matter, you can try another day"" and it convinces me that it doesn't matter very easily and I can't seem to shake it off. I always end up reverting back to my old ways. 

I'll never have the guts to ever even consider suicide, but I just feel like I'm living a meaningless life. I feel like I'm going nowhere. When everyone around me who is my age seems to be doing well with college/university or has their own place, or a good job. 

I just feel like a complete outcast.

Sorry for rambling, I just had to get this out of me.",3.2695776318190117,3.6799910024630553,5.0389764641488775,85.71822021528921,72.47290640394088,8.280824667031565,24.64294836708629,8.401726058763845,1.2831088487502282,1481,39,335,23,27,508,176,406,0.094,0.742,0.16399999999999998,0.978,2,0,1,0,0,1,40.0,0,2,2,7,27,21,0,2,9,0,37,10,4,6,4,72,81,23,1,8,22,0,10,11,0,1,2,1,1,1,22,9,4,1,19,0,0,7,15,2,1,0,4,11,47,19,53,71,9,47,1,0,0,0,10,16,0,8,31,220,69,6,0.0,0.0,0.06636997811532729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318299590526155,0.0,0.0,0.09250109172827617,0.07131659477601662,0.0,0.0,0.06744970684678774,0.047555626904451885,0.06968641209640973,0.0,0.0605451695910274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05229709051478675,0.0,0.08291906402588382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030231363243958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592397296218578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158432840891078,0.0,0.07130937070966781,0.07349689552317376,0.0,0.1086042215665362,0.0,0.0,0.08772432874255594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105814678449084,0.0,0.0,0.059517828543132326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959333591657464,0.05681536477528267,0.0,0.12047702964595275,0.21082397473748352,0.0,0.1796853466217962,0.06152081910155345,0.0573031097836165,0.06498845595245684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3095005554920757,0.3401148991317657,0.0,0.0,0.06216180794310821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132010246825208,0.0,0.193264158799694,0.05704530494366838,0.0,0.0,0.07492297262321923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06092546373245253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04558706283245943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749149384105325,0.0,0.0,0.0708241141608652,0.1121329796298068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607788532189399,0.3654999294358143,0.0,0.060055911679929186,0.06018854958331015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0453985907671686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854017888777425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05043009470306753,0.10491021607009933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136723590937886,0.0,0.0,0.05172625072114107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365045368587847,0.0,0.0,0.05938552391979605,0.07105814678449084,0.0,0.0,0.07667339992159873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04357027927196962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0540859349211889,0.06809195575045278,0.0,0.0,0.12383128449367467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06806119637846961,0.0,0.0,0.05235902108250757,0.0,0.07613395406237164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439417547504909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05944555468478738,0.0,0.15555547899514474,0.0,0.09036840623183767,0.04357939393155129,0.0,0.0,0.11897517038061002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13852721136480187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05611708786762031,0.20057643124420335,0.16195446751236114,0.0,0.0,0.061151026825090424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04951360343621488,0.0,0.06931011880144969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kat5124,2020/01/12,I feel like I am going insane. How do I deal with extream anxiety and panic attacks? Back a few years ago I had almost no anxiety but now I have extream anxiety that is affecting my life. I am only 19 but already feel like I am starting to lose my mind. I get extreamly terrified for no reason at random times. I panic on the inside. My heart beats fast. I feel disconnected from reality. I feel like I am disconnected from the world. It can last for hours at times but I dont tell anyone because I dont want to be seen as crazy. I am constantly terrified that something horrible is going to happen. I dont like driving long distances or on the highway. I dont like riding in a car with others but I have to do it. The first time I got high from smoking weed I had a panic attack so bad I was sobbing and hitting myself. I felt like I was being punished by God or by the universe for being a dissappointment. I have so many irrational fears. I feel like I am losing my mind. I dont want to take any more meds because back when I took anti deppressants after two weeks of taking my meds I felt like a zombie. I felt dead. I had depressive mood swings so bad that I became extreamly depressed and constantly thought about death. So I quit taking them. I was prescribed anti depressents because of a suicide attempt that left be in the ICU for 3 days and in the phych ward for 5 days. I felt normal and happy for two weeks after I was released. I spent time with my loved ones and felt very good but all of a sudden I became suicidal again. I just quit taking my medication because it made my depression so much worse and it made me feel like a lifeless zombie. Eventually my depression went away and I actually felt human again. I felt good for months but now I am back to feeling like shit. I dont feel depressed anymore though I just have extream anxiety. I dont know what to do I know that I need help but I am scared.,1.9593465025030448,4.117906845758355,3.9031396292788543,85.31195744824791,79.51413881748074,6.665430929508863,24.375659585982948,7.7627490962704995,1.3921269922879178,1509,55,300,25,38,511,177,389,0.315,0.563,0.122,-0.9984,0,0,1,0,0,1,29.0,0,0,1,7,18,35,4,5,15,0,36,5,2,5,1,54,75,26,4,4,11,0,15,10,0,0,2,0,0,1,11,11,0,0,19,0,1,7,9,20,0,4,22,16,60,14,37,48,4,48,0,9,1,1,6,11,2,4,40,203,71,0,0.0,0.0,0.0531818179440596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04830885393041818,0.0,0.05457149652285069,0.0,0.06013948132727924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0370602519362883,0.0,0.16676212743315488,0.0,0.05404699732871633,0.03810600461331358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239978256938171,0.05120231006030755,0.12571592272918505,0.09100647643093324,0.13288497879127648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778513804464648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07029291575695193,0.05618465556202591,0.2816323331509154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4470956518377228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06132497627739565,0.22044508225844234,0.2335986733673565,0.3662838461304879,0.0,0.0,0.04635564964971894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028472758321668325,0.0,0.061944509251079874,0.09142003985012387,0.04358672696961651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04819206737866393,0.05801373226928917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457994476763229,0.03652860743674675,0.057579730039172015,0.0,0.0,0.05366918021084552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059900935910460515,0.04442283583832385,0.0,0.0,0.059211826037614976,0.0,0.038493282284654,0.26624785452414124,0.0,0.0,0.0482286807552433,0.0,0.12193779870220445,0.0,0.0,0.04918623181409187,0.10313393574954148,0.0,0.055252035226214635,0.0,0.0,0.12106914543093447,0.054900620980955536,0.0,0.0,0.110054125902944,0.0,0.04349948214605192,0.0,0.04006202293398405,0.04040929636499092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053396098868785616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03692899924932983,0.0414478974816058,0.0,0.1918236526416235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592985902557125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603263224399406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05456162706401826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594102609256736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041954932124590234,0.0,0.0,0.03857369752959433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922310684923372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16390171849102705,0.0,0.04763332393053648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0535436371656947,0.043265024626748576,0.12711200717992227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06054886355253844,0.0,0.0,0.10647251625721434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044966245812839416,0.06428821918104567,0.0,0.08742941065363084,0.0,0.0,0.05051984181841435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055537732939655686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03509468195729113
mentalhealth,TitaniumWhitePrince,2020/01/12,"I dont want to be myself So I'm almost certain i developed GAD (general anxiety disorder) at the beginning of 2019, and have been suffering from it over the course of 2019. Ive been showing symptoms, the main one being that i will spend hours in a day heart racibg and stressing over a single minute mistake I made during that day. I.e i say a joke and its not funny, and i regret that for hours on end, ruining my day. This has made daily functioning difficult, and on top of this I have symmetry OCD, which is the cherry on top. 

Where this is going: Its been on and off over the year, but has gotten incredibly stronger recently. I dont want to exist, or I at least dont want to be myself. I definitely do not want to die - because i understand that is permanent and i know that i have a future ahead of me. But no matter what situation im in, I could be living the dream, i always seem to feel horrible about anything that happens. And I hate myself for making life that way. So. Much. Ive been having frequent moments where i just want to scream and slam my head against a wall because I make life so hard when it doesnt have to be, and its all in my goddamn head. 

Ive briefly discussed this with some of my friends and they all say the same thing - im an amazing person who they love to hang around. And i know that - not to inflate my own ego - but despite having so many friends and being in a great situation, I feel miserable. 

On top of this, i believe the reason it has gotten so severe recently is also due to a recent issue that has arisen - which i have to make a choice about. The problem is, every option has negatives, that could possibly hurt what I value the most - my friendships - which reeeaally makes my anxiety kick up a notch. So ive been delaying a decision, but I'm afraid just delaying it is doing more damage to them. So im freaking out because i dont want to cause any harm to anyone - and in reality, i realise what happens wont matter that much. But thats not what my mind tells me. 

I apologise for dumping all of this in this one post, but ive been aching to get it out. The reason I dont want to tell my friends and family is because ive noticed that some people who dont have it so bad exaggerate how theyre feeling to force empathy from others - so telling someone about my true problems feels like im begging for attention and/or i wont be taken seriously... Which sucks.

Once again, apologies, and i appreciate any advice, to any of it. I plan to see a therapist, which is should've dont a year ago.",3.84330523130134,4.765505433852142,5.244870298313881,82.88974816255947,71.50972762645914,8.434846519671423,28.480112408127972,8.761943790366164,2.088975961954172,1979,73,406,35,36,665,233,514,0.18,0.682,0.13699999999999998,-0.9652,0,0,0,0,0,1,62.0,0,0,3,5,21,30,3,3,24,0,55,7,3,10,5,83,90,35,1,13,13,0,5,1,3,3,3,3,0,1,43,20,0,2,12,3,1,2,16,20,0,2,11,9,54,10,60,67,14,53,0,6,1,1,17,27,1,7,23,292,97,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639076149795156,0.0579726930671682,0.0,0.06548813231404832,0.0,0.0,0.05229994055126739,0.054417606427508654,0.0,0.0,0.13342166719100446,0.0,0.10006084643236526,0.0,0.0,0.04572883705015274,0.0,0.05381819966729645,0.05821940272104305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054605834086378015,0.15946766403938867,0.0,0.0,0.0736828185280651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06718328110599922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044323263985801,0.0,0.0,0.12653176276476025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787433502414092,0.0,0.0749534700588366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5365339246711752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0579245277118873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05510188258114845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06165280936697545,0.0,0.13227176854932995,0.04672140160038157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158242812068867,0.0,0.034168529051325565,0.0,0.03716803163227235,0.0,0.0,0.07210315761277389,0.0,0.0,0.11566508840965953,0.0,0.058585088339262285,0.06456844683278468,0.13423746852105906,0.0,0.0,0.07749869872096578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881062821367378,0.0,0.07001149599560777,0.0,0.2825706441551437,0.06826006583227053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188368775990915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238717367422307,0.031950882486991086,0.0,0.057748939039908964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590255840926394,0.1237651385940353,0.17461864301942998,0.06630480789544947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06603483153353737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961522855643372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445774147821806,0.0,0.069648311823099,0.08863276043942991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04533976488984797,0.05710430338606427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372808728061897,0.06263462378205961,0.0,0.0,0.12515693999071573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448311547632116,0.19372229003069094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401658292447734,0.0,0.0,0.05211491828414632,0.059537230386003476,0.0,0.07388279721124291,0.0,0.0,0.14702351136751254,0.0,0.0,0.05541276719951011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491488341181025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797510076412981,0.0,0.0,0.17148608443318242,0.0,0.0,0.07593383697852563,0.04344850853675589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808316514706414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700201543437582,0.051911063152050185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423024186540923
mentalhealth,tylerjosephsbitch,2020/01/12,"DAE feel a pang of anxiety every sunday evening before work/school i’m an 18F college student and this happens to me.  i feel very restless, anxious and on the edge every sunday evening at about 5pm. usually i can go to sleep but it’s not a very restful one. i’ve done my homework, packed my bag, set my alarm... i essentially have nothing to worry about. 

this problem is made worse the sunday before each school term reopens, especially after a long break where i’d have a sleepless night basically.

i’ve heard many people feel the same but i feel like i experience it on a deeper level.  what steps can i take to reduce this feeling? sometimes i get those “the world is ending” vibes and it honestly just sucks",3.5354347826086965,5.614476818840584,4.542826086956524,82.9755434782609,74.28985507246377,6.6289855072463775,27.44202898550725,7.492282038375204,1.632655072463769,563,22,104,7,12,183,93,138,0.134,0.777,0.08900000000000001,-0.6519,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,1,2,10,0,7,1,1,1,0,16,20,5,0,1,4,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,8,4,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,4,0,1,3,6,11,2,11,17,4,19,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,10,61,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066966554649752,0.1781998203492438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684480131411926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614214448326985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970965937524588,0.0,0.0,0.20836983319581248,0.0,0.26580329785812656,0.0,0.0,0.1542987057935004,0.0,0.0,0.3987871040767209,0.11268855113658205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241195472249369,0.0,0.08964653220517288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13948780198690305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706315589138521,0.0,0.0,0.13959377626234235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925616175506826,0.0,0.1599222728597805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802707437383444,0.0,0.15135452659646834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688781816290324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935614599088812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15093462256199433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3192799496283953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578526062711099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560075970619811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859986351359207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737268810835467,0.260301876769564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483564445177985,0.1601912957781465,0.16074920036565918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SuperPresentation9,2020/01/12,"24 year old male in need of help to sort things, relationships and life out Hey, so I’ve finally somewhat built up the courage to finally seek some advice in some way with things and sorry in advance for the massive vent and if it all sounds like a big sob story… The last 6+ years of my life since finishing high school have been rough and I never expected it would be this bad, particularly the last 2-3 years and by no means am I saying I have it worse than everyone else as a disclaimer. I’m male and 24 now, I have little to no friends (probably only about 2-3 actual friends currently - I have had some fall outs with previous friends over the years) and these friends of mine already are a lot more popular and have heaps of their own friends anyway when they’re all I have, so they have much less time for me than I do for them and half the time I feel like these friends just use me anyway, therefore I don’t really end up socialising much unfortunately even though I would like to. I have been single for about 7 years now since high school (this was my only relationship ever) and even over these past years I haven’t really had many hook-ups or been on many dates either and I’m pretty lonely these days. I’ve mostly tried dating apps over these years so many times  over and over to the point at which it's embarrassing, since I don’t really have the opportunity to meet people in person much and this has had very little success (tinder, bumble, hinge – you name it). I’ve probably been on only about 2 dates in this whole time and after each date I've been ghosted or cut off. So quick description of me, I try to take relatively good care of myself, I work out and am reasonably athletically built, decent face I guess and average height and Im usually pretty ok with talking to people too if that and can be confident where necessary if that helps to describe me a bit.

What makes this even worse is that I graduated college (business degree and want to get into marketing) almost 2 years ago now and have since really struggled to land a graduate role or job or even experience in my field (I currently still work my part time hospitality job which I’ve had for years so I at least have some income – I hate it but need the money). The worst part about this is I’ve almost graduated too long ago to be eligible for any graduate positions let alone jobs and I’m not even a very favourable candidate for internships either since I’m no longer studying (I tried to land interns while studying but still wasn’t successful after a countless amount of applications) – so now I’m slowly falling into more and more debt etc. 

It's hard considering all my friends a lot of people I know are quite successful at this point, doing what they want, are in relationships and have plenty of friends and I feel like I keep getting left more and more behind and that Im getting nowhere.

Over these years I’ve tried various hobbies, through my last few jobs and tried making friends when I was at college but never really had any luck and also of course dating apps with my relationship issues which has also been pretty much successful too as I find people just don’t like me, and in terms of work its practically been a second job for me constantly looking for work, applying, reaching out, seeking advice etc.

If anyone is or has been in a similar position or has some ideas, I would love your advice, as I’m kinda at the point where I really don’t know what to do anymore… Thanks :)",7.80455774062202,6.74797214874816,7.804420427965003,74.67854955384217,63.15316642120766,11.34611452828554,33.07809928094949,10.525883462305444,3.1830956077276262,2775,89,541,57,34,898,288,679,0.06,0.795,0.145,0.9956,9,4,0,0,0,0,50.0,0,2,4,11,37,36,2,2,21,1,56,4,1,5,6,101,85,57,1,12,18,0,4,5,9,3,2,2,0,3,33,40,0,1,8,0,2,3,12,8,0,2,16,7,49,28,83,62,39,102,0,2,1,1,31,45,1,25,58,362,82,22,0.0,0.0,0.048896511578815666,0.0,0.0,0.14688986141478372,0.08883240652106582,0.0,0.10034842413283554,0.051895005659719766,0.05529353750479951,0.08013996477091212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814799147417865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03503548332547018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041836659600778064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05470309177710477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05108670254273436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541470994115929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032314412162760944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04185737618840176,0.0,0.04437930102092515,0.0,0.11176351774614096,0.16547366145671433,0.04532400836881758,0.0,0.04787870780139383,0.0,0.049013566722375175,0.0,0.0,0.05067049197378421,0.07159188784606525,0.0,0.10977798406614532,0.045796241737020765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484079615035125,0.0,0.07853540612812689,0.0,0.0,0.04202677916886333,0.0,0.0,0.055197727985155036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04488539438211158,0.049469588301152286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717038061269995,0.1058800938142785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056563902981288126,0.10824678397908044,0.05229794922707362,0.2486138088170103,0.044536773214161725,0.0,0.0,0.055074213698535116,0.12252994299013367,0.0,0.0,0.05444063120400455,0.051237076809980235,0.07078310955514994,0.1223970127842224,0.10043933289026566,0.0,0.04434249031239014,0.04207666440255242,0.0,0.0,0.08519715267832023,0.045222883428803456,0.0,0.06689267594006128,0.15239974212804291,0.0,0.05458043948354528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733555519465946,0.0743063589770826,0.07729012032961659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05257812306231775,0.0,0.0,0.11432427533364985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085204595119468,0.047832123897964436,0.13894957136450525,0.04375088014813976,0.0,0.0,0.14209992083374987,0.0,0.0,0.15292833283182625,0.10804611164435424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053294207619387066,0.0,0.0,0.19259623631746525,0.05151761179341203,0.0,0.21518161683349646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039846533300487035,0.0,0.10142048200437424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20724220630193385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608988991804519,0.0,0.0,0.08002989658755577,0.0,0.0,0.05238197404062106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03767369462818203,0.04027353828673519,0.0,0.04613114027176882,0.0,0.0,0.06657678587743468,0.0,0.049229175982629936,0.0,0.14608690458403706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17009441082709026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043275747189551586,0.05518499998862099,0.082685874384968,0.0591079766561189,0.03977204111874543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594188391026639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14591190489898084,0.0,0.10212518137689497,0.10678221338921867,0.0,0.0,0.3226680826301496
mentalhealth,throwawaygeenee,2020/01/12,"Is BPD just NPD + empathy? I know that all cluster B disorders have overlapping symptomps, but these two in particular seem to cooexist a lot more.

I don't think that all NPDs have BPD, but it seems to me that most of (if not all) BPDs have NPD too.",4.894117647058824,4.709968607843142,5.616470588235295,85.07411764705886,68.80392156862746,9.937254901960783,30.72549019607843,9.725611199111238,2.444066666666666,193,7,44,4,3,63,40,51,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,3,14,9,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,4,9,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,0,31,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6890663073546618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135179184453041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15033876442923896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325668185960605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4980686958446615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528310386134474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672236467842293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Simmdog99,2020/01/12,"First time post Haven’t posted here before just lingered. I’m a generally high functioning sufferer, mostly down to how I was raised. But I still struggle with day to day things, I.e tidying, eating, not wearing the same outfit each day. 
Today however, I woke up feeling, well blank, the start of a slump. I forced myself up into shower, put on a fresh outfit, even finally did my skin routine again for the first time in a year. I haven’t eaten, haven’t brought myself to that yet. But I’ve took a step and left the house today feeling like I’ve achieved something. 
Sometimes it’s the smallest of daily achievements that make life like this easier. No one is alone, just take that first step :)",4.1593181818181835,6.1884241742424235,4.286969696969699,85.70045454545456,72.4090909090909,6.618181818181819,25.63636363636364,7.348242739294969,1.2775363636363632,549,18,101,6,11,170,93,132,0.09300000000000001,0.768,0.139,0.631,2,1,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,5,9,5,0,1,10,0,6,5,2,2,0,17,16,4,0,0,5,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,4,2,1,2,0,0,5,5,2,1,4,6,3,8,3,13,10,3,31,0,1,0,0,0,8,0,1,18,64,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16551638519637565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598770723069148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30919534295826123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16352693089647027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555390423931632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16161086333848215,0.11416927635931055,0.0,0.17506554692291962,0.0,0.4078064151174531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688494891715091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18440086703967476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17363552369144314,0.0,0.11287949849498792,0.1561515283202185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667533201856194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829232187477013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3061102375908607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16065456943803175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12303060213451927,0.15805753364894598,0.0,0.11311531191440725,0.0,0.12762556841855754,0.0,0.0,0.16706954517944272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201582632582466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617157466637807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18637459280630303,0.0,0.3029649895238028,0.0,0.17755631493593813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368961634289407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029132841903542
mentalhealth,crimsonblueblack,2020/01/12,"Is there a name for what I feel ? One second I'm very happy and next thing you know I'm empty, sad.

**I'm not sure that I might be bipolar though.** I'm generally happy at school , very enthusiastic and slightly confident ,yes , but nowhere *near* close to manic. People appreciate my always active and bubbly  attitude , it's not anything too big.

I never get angry with others for no apparent reason , either. Quite actually, I always avoid conflict no matter my mood or feeling inside of me. With loved ones, I never raise my voice or anything like that and I never get into fights, either , it's just not my type of thing.

But, afterwards I just get inexplicably depressed - I self harm and think I'll never get anywhere. I get self-destructive, suicidal, contemplating and overthinking everything. It's like a shock that goes onto me for a few moments, and then fades away (or in rarer cases , goes on for days or weeks ) . 

***Let me give you an example :***  A couple days ago, I was feeling empty in technology class, when suddenly, I saw my pair of scissors. Depressing thoughts came into my mind, and I very mildly scrathed my arm with it. The school bell rang, my classes were done, and I rushed to the bathroom on the other floor where no one was and deeply cut my forearm , then hid that with my  sleeve and some napkins. Next hour, my mom had to come to school to talk to my teacher -it was a parent-teacher meeting. While they were talking in a class, I was laughing and playing with my teacher's son in the halls and we were having fun. The teacher talked positively about me and I was happy. When I came home, I felt depressed and empty.

I also feel like there is something that is present, sort of like a hallucination, but not really as I still think rationally and I don't see or hear it. I don't know what is with me. I wonder if I should get professional help..",2.2007541899441345,4.806938614525142,3.688768156424583,84.55689525139668,81.84916201117319,6.149832402234638,23.19581005586593,7.461004344511776,1.2095405586592185,1456,51,274,23,40,479,189,358,0.138,0.69,0.171,0.9219,2,1,1,0,1,0,68.0,1,2,1,1,12,22,2,1,13,1,21,4,2,1,5,73,50,33,1,2,17,2,5,4,0,2,1,3,1,1,17,29,0,2,12,1,0,4,13,9,0,4,15,10,45,12,34,31,4,43,0,4,2,1,17,17,0,10,26,188,62,8,0.0,0.0,0.08711847132844129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913594662134138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139232429601172,0.14856611172156614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469296646679278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387578976015657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20421117106956616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690158016303633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877989823436416,0.0,0.11514859030215956,0.0,0.23067449825218556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913582188910896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08023364594376428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805583122264549,0.06377730872081863,0.08571696649288083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798516420138629,0.08563968206149382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28510125453068363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061819991252344,0.0,0.059838429047188536,0.0,0.08954902412953772,0.0,0.08791683169495253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09812522718105307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128863517857368,0.0,0.17445891830940166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057320136286665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470552489530466,0.09014121350775718,0.1045565401278505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27541421318181364,0.0,0.1898876606710768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18148296278672804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912812708861343,0.0,0.0,0.06189129785621739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495380648939997,0.0,0.0,0.057191161324952736,0.09178846181490402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710499297901686,0.07113975862276124,0.0,0.18626434406864872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872742776915704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129427055387058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976511824648224,0.0,0.0841396162990421,0.0,0.0,0.21526499399895246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861925573676173,0.11440625079428587,0.0877111764804023,0.07087352319235111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209810090009004,0.0,0.0,0.07161015643826485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681376176592707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lunatic_bee,2020/01/12,"I feel worthless and I’m scared Since the beginning of November, I feel like my mental health deteriorated. I’m in my last year of high school, and it’s pretty stressful, I feel like I’ll never make it, even though I’m a good student. I also need to find in which College I’ll go and it scares me. I cry everyday or so, I’m always exhausted, I have no motivation to do anything (homework or hobbies), and it already happened once or twice that I was so anxious about this year or my future that I couldn’t breathe anymore. I feel worth, like I’m sinking and drowning. There’re evening where I can’t leave my bathroom floor because I’m feeling so bad, like I would collapse just by trying to join my bed. I don’t want to see people outside school, even my friends, because it’s exhausting (but I force myself to go and end up having a good time so... it’s cool, I guess?)
Some friends of mine told me it was just laziness but I don’t think so. (But maybe I’m wrong) They also told me to do things I like (reading, drawing) but I can’t, I have absolutely no motivation nor willpower. 

I would like to know if anyone had advice to feel a bit better? I don’t want to spend the end of the year feeling this shitty when it’s supposed to be one of the best year in my life
Thanks in advance",2.094789146779996,3.7898097669172937,3.6038934292252387,89.82337201699906,77.27067669172935,5.979470415168357,26.22687152664269,6.7026698264267655,0.9596817914351092,1002,39,216,9,23,331,136,266,0.11699999999999999,0.6890000000000001,0.195,0.9524,1,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,1,5,16,22,0,3,7,1,17,5,1,3,1,39,46,25,1,7,11,0,7,6,2,2,4,0,2,0,14,6,0,0,12,1,2,3,10,8,0,2,5,9,33,14,22,37,3,24,0,1,1,0,5,8,0,7,19,131,47,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946565776838144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232513990993576,0.1627990025866707,0.08469543135396285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499100732736996,0.10094594104698837,0.07117225165787358,0.0,0.08376251611851819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849883884281025,0.12409754378683348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068197989872973,0.09002285426786036,0.11112568872693307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118088912592864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803071903600988,0.0,0.0,0.2016892354509397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602680575317315,0.14543415345830785,0.0,0.0,0.09303201590264668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572816836093313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569646951916338,0.17074920734441318,0.0,0.0,0.1121305092499272,0.0,0.09001043227158766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081954514848958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754418045991036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05593979910021757,0.08297047364910452,0.0,0.10777836394741096,0.0,0.0,0.07189558710502472,0.29836965850164954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794400867610599,0.0,0.10225931828313913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257795297867636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07547421041359705,0.07850486667566156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084004644855296,0.06897390725472273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056670068626426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035545753126338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10181513810080156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038142750293272,0.20602895645599853,0.08111153308317927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419974871778789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659734379988584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371233997791394,0.0,0.0,0.06762315386122268,0.06522137954832886,0.10000579325241724,0.0,0.05935316399312333,0.0,0.0,0.1945248141170814,0.0,0.06910709408813864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007391907445746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461397118117694,0.11128875398773604,0.0,0.26219149044501844
mentalhealth,throwaway12938498,2020/01/12,"I've had issues in the past but don't know if where I'm at now if normal In the past when I was 17 or so I had a nervous breakdown. I developed terrible social anxiety and my short term memory was very disorganized. Like not being able to remember certain things from the start of the day or even not remembering how I got to the moment I was in.

I had friends (who were a bit shitty tbh) and family at the time but no one ever really talked to me about what was going on or asked if I was alright, I just sort of continued on.

Now I am in my late twenties I have had successes in my field of work and live in a competitive environment (being vague on purpose for the sake of my identity) However, I notice I have certain behaviors and insecurities that I'm questioning.

My biggest concern is that I have imaginary conversations with people from my life, kinda like when you're in the shower or something like that and you have fake arguments. However, I notice I disconnect and have these conversations not just when I'm by myself and at times it feels out of my control. I'll have them when I commute to work or even at work (someone even mentioned it, asking if I was talking to someone and asking why my lips were moving) It's very easy for me to get lost in thought like this.

What are your thoughts, is this normal behavior?",5.079702552719201,5.665231256603775,6.430543840177581,76.72312985571591,68.50943396226414,10.008879023307436,31.0599334073252,10.056822442137396,3.033881243063264,1053,41,205,25,17,358,141,265,0.132,0.746,0.12300000000000001,-0.3545,3,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,1,6,16,14,0,2,11,1,25,2,1,2,3,42,40,25,0,6,16,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,1,0,13,10,0,1,7,0,0,2,5,5,0,1,16,1,31,9,34,22,2,38,0,1,0,0,15,19,0,12,21,153,44,4,0.1188900088489876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095053135321113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334383279069779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979709742076873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13334525434678635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667422018256435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23557718869913435,0.1075428195853707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207891940300274,0.0,0.06011436071911583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185412591730947,0.0,0.06211512261944059,0.0,0.06756793185020872,0.0,0.09508720088553653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240902806443194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653388396210623,0.0,0.13411310846593974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397552924531425,0.2323346118292201,0.0,0.10498205597959108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978248895691638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263612641834969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329739318659769,0.0,0.2707141261444907,0.0,0.0,0.08056294689368708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269879322625359,0.08242336248771752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331840191676082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616398402132665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693584076075744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12119339184968475,0.20147023737017175,0.091527337252253,0.0,0.0,0.08415096018683071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19111857127864496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898523905838736,0.0,0.0,0.1887707737664764,0.1386514404959388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961934169388033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727974082828014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596600272457031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jeepers-mboy,2020/01/12,"I'm only happy when I'm in a relationship. Unfortunately, this happens very rarely and for very brief periods of time. I feel numb most of the time, but every few years I'll date a girl for a month - not long enough for it to be official but enough to realise this was the missing piece of the puzzle. I'll be happy, then she'll change her mind, and then it's back to feeling bad.

This is stupid of course. You should aim to be content while single. I just find it impossible, no matter how many years of experience I have with it.",3.4622222222222203,4.6558605925925916,4.6435185185185235,85.81583333333336,72.7037037037037,7.622222222222224,23.685185185185183,8.07648339933343,1.0532185185185179,416,11,90,6,8,137,71,108,0.16,0.75,0.09,-0.8422,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,0,4,6,1,0,6,0,8,1,0,1,0,16,14,9,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,2,6,2,14,8,6,15,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,2,13,59,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14948914186795198,0.16232406886985276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20565979865437053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4017546006029562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16379864775643352,0.0,0.0,0.1901700961816748,0.0,0.0,0.19659888020000774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17768704214526568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191595084096387,0.4139057105204628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720465620346834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19710103111323424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962984857021536,0.0,0.15517605367432094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14785741914578554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087233775575927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267238444652672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208169030775087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25038708427852424
mentalhealth,MrMillztaaaar,2020/01/12,"Sertraline - advice needed Morning everyone,

This year I decided to make a change and try and get some help for my mental wellbeing. I'm very prone to falling into bad moods and shutting myself away from everyone.

Years ago I tried to get help and was suggested CBT therapy,  I found it pretty useless as I just told them what they wanted to hear. I didn't seem to want the help at the time.

I went to my doctors the other week and had a good chat with him. He did some tests and concluded I was moderately depressed with high anxiety levels (I agree) and he offered for me to try Sertraline as a way of improving my mood. I always thought pills were an excuse and wouldn't actually help me, but decided to give them a try and see.

My first week I was like a completely different person, I was full of life and happy, fast forward another week and now I'm utterly miserable again. I've been in a mood since Wednesday and nothing seems to get me out of it. I'm not sleeping great, hardly eating and have no attention for anything.

Could it be that my minds tricked me into that false sense of happiness as a placebo effect or are the drugs just making me worse?

I'm booked in to see him friday for a check up but was just wondering if anyone had any advice for in the meantime?

Thanks",5.839580052493439,5.925021645669293,6.576992125984255,78.06892650918637,66.79527559055119,10.237900262467194,31.89396325459317,10.047579312681364,3.036450183727034,1014,38,197,22,15,335,151,254,0.106,0.774,0.12,0.57,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,3,3,5,14,1,1,14,0,16,6,1,4,0,46,40,20,0,6,8,0,1,1,0,1,4,1,0,1,8,18,1,0,10,2,1,3,4,5,0,1,15,4,27,6,34,22,3,29,0,3,2,0,19,14,0,7,14,127,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.10580921236189343,0.0,0.0,0.21190742159173606,0.09611408526613302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022003614861428,0.0,0.0,0.07373414860388412,0.11369527210737475,0.08294643751204618,0.0,0.0,0.07581475192582726,0.0,0.08922626771364814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187083307850232,0.0,0.09053210254223606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470149873781922,0.0,0.11368375526207625,0.0,0.0,0.08657021946853695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338810549151008,0.0,0.0,0.11328324577865817,0.0,0.11097973503264423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12574101690357398,0.11094799588714796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072134881526216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922280389722652,0.0,0.11888472265236395,0.0,0.0,0.16994605947592215,0.10401315780309577,0.0,0.09094351025015117,0.0,0.1195412645522989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23084533605240945,0.09712938761426496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220522605221573,0.0,0.2907056081177611,0.11455918806430672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658526987639791,0.052972005977449145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475186726947886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926901814939538,0.0,0.10948046559085216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039732347952963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403873024460937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946743646763521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030934465655902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17280472700471247,0.19741592584631895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969202059170607,0.0,0.10850540840469147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982510939750984,0.12399584253631302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860790088708416,0.06322471608433065,0.0,0.0,0.1036067440763108,0.0,0.29445954413765824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946371591381971,0.12790622996096782,0.08606438800886787,0.2609210469710503,0.0,0.0,0.10051301136558753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117584568714769,0.0,0.0,0.11049648180307356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13964699965308
mentalhealth,irestills,2020/01/12,"How can I safely reach out for help with my mental health? [19F] I've been meaning to talk to someone about my mental health for the past couple of months, but I still don't know where to start. I'm having doubts that what I am going through isn't actually real or as severe, but simultaneously, I can feel that something isn't normal. 

I've taken a few online screenings and all of them have pointed towards GAD and depression. In addition, I have been feelings some symptoms of anxiety and depression, i.e feeling nervous for no specific reason almost every day, mood swings, etc.- and these have persisted for years, just in different levels (recently it's spiking  because second semester of my freshman year at uni  is starting up again, but it's definitely been around since the early years of high school). Yet, I still don't think these are valid reasons for me to actually seek help. Maybe I just don't want to believe there's something wrong, or I'm thinking that there'll be some sort of consequences after I seek help? My parents scared me into thinking that if I seek therapy it'll be on some sort of record, and I'm just paranoid now (oof). I can't rely on online tests either which just makes me more nervous.

Regardless, I'm just so exhausted having to deal with these feelings all the time and I'm wondering if it's time to sit down with my parents and convince them to get me some help, or if possible, if I can do that on my own. Advice? Is this safe to tell a college advisor or counselor so they can point me in the right direction?",6.763672073480557,6.6726580465116285,6.996357240570648,76.4382802423295,64.88039867109634,9.873050615595076,33.98495212038304,9.478462496947786,3.0590115692788737,1236,49,229,21,17,400,165,301,0.13699999999999998,0.775,0.08800000000000001,-0.9558,3,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,3,1,17,12,0,4,6,0,26,4,0,4,2,61,48,22,0,7,17,2,4,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,15,14,0,2,12,0,0,1,7,8,0,1,4,5,25,3,41,41,11,39,0,2,1,0,12,19,0,17,18,158,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.20750306053292414,0.0,0.0,0.10389321862526676,0.0,0.0,0.1064626312536408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133337003390831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464601576930297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481077759283943,0.0,0.0,0.11978455426189567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763941039257952,0.0,0.06856664418981089,0.10960971657993884,0.1831439557510487,0.0,0.0,0.11108021542479984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857324397706935,0.0,0.0,0.08957793113546772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21503133503340727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0555470339484738,0.0,0.060423260005560135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260232113792542,0.0,0.0,0.2850522277408287,0.11233134433609868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05842987326646797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07096843177874823,0.0,0.10681123464342207,0.11581202699718254,0.0,0.0,0.21428810574525134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486242127335268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416956738340724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361082494002478,0.0,0.10149304909634664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20101071645953686,0.11985814668757895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101374178892962,0.0,0.21862627359927075,0.10497670341370673,0.0,0.0,0.09079542761959196,0.0,0.0,0.1064433770894104,0.10760000937239532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010965525429612,0.0,0.08794777110005139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008332949265932,0.16369836829310586,0.0,0.0,0.1505055788405252,0.0,0.16981220070560168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050564173026824,0.0,0.08545479200000901,0.09292706493541884,0.0,0.1215844832661746,0.0,0.0,0.2043738270017262,0.0,0.0,0.12399035770110935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06270941250217497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152978901133268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624260179835467,0.0,0.2053969062009358
mentalhealth,Trowahealth,2020/01/12,"Dreams/nightmares, sweating a lot while sleeping. Hey everyone,

I am having this issue for a while where I dream heavily about stuff I used to be scared of as a child, for example last night I would've made people mad and i happen to come across them and they recognise me so they are forcing me to wait for some person who needs to talk to me if that makes sense, its stupid cuz irl i would've just ran away, or self defended but those dreams always make it look bad because I seem to be frozen in a way where I just follow the storyline my brain made, as in, the worst shit happens lol. Also when I fight in dreams, it feels like my arms dont reach or if it doesn't hurt them, they barely feel it. 

Like, I could live with waking up 3-5 times a night but if you'r drenched in sweat bcuz of the adrenaline and heartrate you wake up with its REALLY inconvenient, I basically sleep at home when im in a relationship, or I wake her up with my movements in my sleep. 

I've had therapy for a while and theres nothing stressful in my life anymore, everything is fine but it seems like these dreams keep comin back which overall kill my sleep. When I wake up in these situations I just get up and grab a shower, but while i walk to the shower i can actually feel the water droplets running down my body, its crazy :S

Does any of you have this same issue even though you (think) you gave your traumas a place and moved on?

I am pretty sure im not alone but I have no idea how to fix it.

The doctor named an option which Im not gonna do which is an operation to stop you from sweating at certain places of your body, but logically id think you wouldn't be able to lose heat, and making another issue rather then fixing one.

​

Thank you for taking your time to read this.",5.718370165745856,5.158110754143646,5.844138121546964,85.4010690607735,67.14917127071823,9.118453038674033,28.044751381215463,8.395991825355821,1.5766791160221,1391,36,307,17,20,441,206,362,0.145,0.7290000000000001,0.126,-0.8961,2,1,0,0,1,1,35.0,0,10,5,1,17,19,5,2,17,1,18,19,16,8,2,59,45,34,1,7,18,0,4,3,0,2,2,0,3,3,21,11,1,3,9,5,0,7,6,12,0,1,5,5,44,7,46,34,4,46,0,2,1,0,26,23,1,11,18,195,65,2,0.0881122713790693,0.0,0.0859848665180191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125773987803423,0.0,0.07046335158775488,0.07331646831427786,0.09546960922630343,0.10706605409427383,0.059919366036298764,0.09239339919142307,0.0,0.0,0.08738369673443071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08278437943924301,0.06775289784457883,0.07357006614948859,0.05371242280414562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19574574002490167,0.0,0.09836243533676267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590091979936643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035047893541058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018664339310163,0.07710764246194217,0.0,0.10326692583031423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819732423925236,0.0,0.0,0.08419505127113616,0.07918962800345099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133656635660359,0.12589484855774274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04603502509567625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15583478117053207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838379242868355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943260088926364,0.09946802932443563,0.28552911969323114,0.2758989570988727,0.0,0.0783182353160364,0.0974831733618405,0.0,0.0,0.071823261362144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622363030644783,0.12914161521921666,0.0,0.07780474991936333,0.0,0.07399211631580745,0.09857509342703172,0.0,0.07490990220184224,0.0,0.16674792328893734,0.17644687604558734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364940005749996,0.0,0.06533413276104319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16537479560059645,0.0,0.08454610078931744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05970715544996405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06108595460462874,0.07693623671946143,0.184117139700284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08964185692587516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813611581106817,0.0,0.05644697728908764,0.0,0.0,0.09459960436408636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821575496047115,0.0,0.0,0.1604282051960559,0.09192031562071544,0.0,0.09044598036325148,0.0,0.09904188478952547,0.35270362003074984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736658042792416,0.10093230916443424,0.0,0.10086747005280304,0.0,0.0,0.08304477300887371,0.0,0.06624946236958743,0.07082130610097671,0.0,0.0811219412288416,0.10076406138256032,0.0,0.0,0.1129175713642506,0.0865698592594984,0.0,0.1027579480425034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610071200198414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993941973206352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12518485904624374,0.0,0.10706605409427383,0.0
mentalhealth,Find-Star,2020/01/12,"To my fellow 26-year olds, especially females, where are you in your life right now? Just your general perspective on where you feel/think about your life right now... including relationships, career, life philosophy, lessons, how you feel, etc.

And a personal question for me, if you guys can answer... what makes you feel you've moved ahead in life? Is everybody partying it up, living life to the fullest, getting your dream job already, having a  family? Or anybody as lost and confused as I am about who you are and what you're doing and scared as hell of what the next steps are and maybe also depressed, or out of touch with friends, feeling really alone, haven't had a real relationship... haven't achieved her goals yet... still living with parents in the same city she was born and grew up in, and not much of a social life? Hopefully you get what I mean.

Just looking to see if I'm the only one feeling this...",6.9240350877192975,7.1918279824561475,6.4673040935672494,79.15218421052631,64.49707602339181,9.88093567251462,32.88947368421053,9.642632912329526,2.9023656140350886,719,27,136,13,10,223,112,171,0.10400000000000001,0.821,0.075,-0.8049,2,1,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,11,0,5,12,7,1,2,8,0,12,6,0,2,0,32,25,16,0,3,7,1,5,0,2,0,6,0,0,2,7,10,0,0,8,1,0,3,3,5,0,1,3,7,17,2,23,22,3,23,1,2,2,0,23,12,1,7,8,93,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294448501868794,0.137922013643153,0.099948979693478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764780373314776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938924976587025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782299036124567,0.0,0.3159761791650122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656167145653133,0.0,0.13059707450180624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375296806735225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12413646844061164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12402649090252038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.529675769121633,0.0,0.0,0.22072482203920546,0.0,0.10495436797263104,0.0,0.13643387201518253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342722296282205,0.0,0.12556237279290558,0.13614329013486245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283730866812854,0.09187699580586377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292099765349527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114879122542875,0.0,0.08469181685449167,0.09505531733518634,0.0,0.0,0.13877899702987845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913046552986252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400097314485408,0.0,0.0,0.14225818670004264,0.080067406101155,0.0,0.0,0.26837025836960715,0.0,0.2134698539666132,0.0,0.0,0.12512993637846195,0.0,0.09959538872139652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127404581662745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981170483124632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008415575625001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804850507002968
mentalhealth,muchachaganj,2020/01/12,"My mental health is rapidly and desperately declining and I don’t really care enough to do anything about it I’ve been having paranoia, ocd, depression and anxiety coupled with addiction issues and most days I can’t get out of bed. I just cut myself for the first time in years the other day. My family isn’t helping me at all and in fact left me while they went to another state for a few months despite me pleading with my mom to stay and help me cuz I can’t do it alone. I’ve been suicidal and to make matters worse I have like no friends and the guy I was talking to wants nothing to do with me now. I know I should be in therapy but I hate therapy. I hate everything. Why am I still here? Life is stupid and so am I. Today is also the anniversary of my dads suicide. 
No one will probably read this lmao 
I can’t take care of myself I haven’t been showering eating sleeping changing my clothes etc I am just feeling like a waste of space",2.0462600229095083,4.0338246340206245,3.6978694158075602,87.74710194730815,78.43298969072166,7.403894616265751,25.7262313860252,8.344100000000001,1.7325083619702175,745,29,156,15,18,248,119,194,0.204,0.672,0.124,-0.953,1,1,0,0,0,2,11.0,0,0,1,1,8,10,4,0,6,0,24,5,1,2,2,26,35,14,2,2,3,2,1,2,1,2,3,0,2,1,4,13,1,0,2,1,0,1,8,5,0,2,5,1,28,5,21,27,5,20,0,1,0,0,8,7,0,1,12,111,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126122677296746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134205705755638,0.0,0.10362500586121244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13587583214552024,0.09912827518290994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663322361708404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642307051446243,0.0,0.13707836131146045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337770389803353,0.0,0.16713664196583974,0.0,0.1116069851538663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259259586279798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389068417923194,0.1445158506697677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645806623014633,0.0,0.12215640524008635,0.0,0.0655194950831789,0.0925719123894162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102206038143002,0.0,0.0,0.10011311572502693,0.0,0.06770015387955956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830448175309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558666648937349,0.0,0.13773738310601694,0.0,0.0,0.1737093622286523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524775836068076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121372880093685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407889495267336,0.0,0.09152612137395842,0.12661239573455418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649559500276957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305860700588447,0.0,0.0,0.1517624225071192,0.10342944655023907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433541681486213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780669942662862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970905757736574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961497447551998,0.0,0.08301220734788221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967348937212908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13811494110523104,0.1034826821631919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834787760464284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974279646320952,0.1041514219015347,0.0,0.0,0.29637183631162783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555908659077352,0.0,0.12282660169883215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764295872221035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201218732108164,0.1169257123861932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320529968912498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344521250878227
mentalhealth,1010010001111100,2020/01/12,"How do you know when to get help? From my throwaway (obviously)

I'm going to start with saying that I am a combat veteran, but I know there's veterans out there that that are a lot worse off than me. Which has been a big reason I haven't sought help. 

Do I need help? Or is this normal angst from a 23 year old man? 

I work full time at a job that I love. I have a huge circle of good friends. I keep quite busy with activities with said friends. I am often the life of the party. I quit all substances except nicotine a year ago. I found my faith. I have hobbies that I enjoy. I'm [exclusively] sexually active. I make a point of abiding by a sleep schedule and always get my 8 hours of sleep. I can sleep a full night (disregarding occasional nightmares) easily. I do my best to keep a positive mindset. I eat healthy, take vitamins and excercise often. I've traveled to many countries. I feel that I've done all that I know in order to lead a positive, fulfilling, and healthy lifestyle. 

But I can't get this demon out of me. As I drive home from an amazing night of laughter and good times with friends, or an awesome evening of good sex, there's an emptiness inside of me. My heart feels like a fist is clamped around it and squeezing. I am constantly gripped with this insatiable feeling of hopelessness. I never wake feeling rested. I never spend a full day feeling happy. Nothing I do makes me feel fulfilled. I can't get the war out of my head. I can't get death out of my mind. The suicide of my best friend is always with me. I fantasize killing myself. I imagine how easy it would be to put my glock to my head and a 9mm round through my skull, or tie a cinder block to my feet and jump off the dock, and end these feelings that I don't even know how to articulate. I know it's selfish and that it's the easy way out. If I was still a slave to alcohol I would have done it already.  Last month while watching a movie I found myself slicing a gash in my arm with a serrated blade because it distracted me from from the pain I felt in my heart. Though I have many friends, I have none close enough to share these feelings with.

I have an aversion to medication and I feel that a therapist will just suggest things that I already do. Where the fuck do I turn?",2.7254141876430253,4.354108886956522,3.82974828375286,89.16598398169339,75.34782608695653,6.9290617848970255,26.670480549199084,7.669130373188453,1.3534782608695646,1768,67,379,24,38,573,224,460,0.09699999999999999,0.624,0.27899999999999997,0.9985,1,0,1,0,0,3,52.0,0,1,0,6,16,24,3,1,33,0,34,20,11,7,5,75,70,23,4,5,8,0,13,1,5,3,5,2,1,1,24,25,2,4,19,1,1,6,8,7,0,0,8,16,64,17,54,58,11,49,2,1,2,3,15,20,1,7,22,254,88,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06883337237479169,0.08298584160468728,0.0,0.0,0.17138072944516278,0.0,0.12922454241101655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912630093434555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047335635623497865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16298092381017662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391368877143235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05007879562385481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15892889562610524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945687350600918,0.0,0.0,0.06877618365954996,0.08023476037433211,0.0,0.10257617104694032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3533663987203193,0.055474249410927774,0.0745576204663842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028173053606455,0.2999667937977145,0.07178756346083896,0.20284852740615192,0.0,0.0441311387555867,0.19539119023354354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266146909415789,0.0,0.0,0.15938568951167725,0.0,0.0,0.18403481036981964,0.15614449734086713,0.0,0.0778907890392933,0.0,0.07647108896070952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705713511547549,0.1380404478536809,0.08590988327791843,0.0,0.2133761770183009,0.0632963391267336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0548475531471716,0.037936602140979284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601653118772711,0.07008351336690267,0.0,0.10366596273706942,0.15745287274540062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822572013470869,0.0,0.0,0.07840588228992973,0.0,0.061980689026125996,0.0,0.0,0.0575776057138737,0.11977925268250685,0.0,0.0,0.1457413510167723,0.07608198617359535,0.07450871160557239,0.0,0.08148219023331076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262667425676573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340576972029829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780612082182458,0.0,0.1651838639591418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983867814264282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738643615709498,0.06175159205816488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233122746600098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05496213364431112,0.0,0.062012590772500924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493814116614301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058384266567424035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015938021947226,0.05158820832723342,0.0,0.07629220764863412,0.0,0.0905584319607874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446253730536077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163614887057961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0565312191640614,0.0,0.07913351572764091,0.11032279990420724,0.0,0.0,0.10001004432937052
mentalhealth,flamebrat,2020/01/12,"self harm i never really understood why i did it before, i even had a therapist explain it one time but i never felt like i connected with what they were saying until i guess i just realized a few weeks ago or so that i do it to distract myself? the physical pain is somehow more tolerable than the mental, and it numbs me out for a bit after. idk. it sucks feeling so reliant on it and i really just wanna relapse again because i have nothing else that helps 
i can’t afford therapy nor medication, i have absolutely nothing helping me get through all this shit but a food addiction ( that definitely doesn’t help ) and self harm lol 
idk i guess this is just a vent bc there’s not much to do about it",3.5717792207792205,5.141891528571431,5.387922077922081,79.1025324675325,73.0,8.805194805194805,28.441558441558442,9.339509955726095,2.5887142857142864,554,22,107,13,11,190,95,140,0.24,0.664,0.096,-0.9686,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,10,8,2,1,7,1,11,6,1,0,3,24,19,10,0,1,7,0,2,1,0,0,4,1,0,2,13,5,1,0,5,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,5,3,17,1,12,14,5,10,0,0,0,0,8,2,2,4,9,84,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17279182628173534,0.0,0.0,0.14050347637110466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662204729886267,0.0,0.13487450387330568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17304438467752525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324090407220678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468983378046924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014395366022803,0.0,0.15218787782829596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19166263463340288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281135238337185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34921817266592897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187239551936443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743663136962803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596752453259842,0.15973389193828266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651805072401883,0.0,0.2444947969044805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30417608899106835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740583456834328,0.0,0.1686585238167125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20308234947402531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260480644240514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307067013534777,0.0,0.16270120274625915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18126216239457746,0.1840343704115717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242445972229096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714166384080985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14302443666990414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,designerdrugstore,2020/01/12,should medically assisted suicide for mental illness be legal? I’m not 100% sure if this is allowed but I just want opinions. I think people should be allowed to do what they want with their own body if no other treatment is working or if it isn’t working well enough because mental illness is just as bad as physical illness.,6.299516129032259,7.2322878225806475,6.632419354838714,75.11862903225808,65.93548387096774,8.135483870967743,38.08064516129032,8.07648339933343,3.313696774193549,263,14,43,3,4,85,45,62,0.278,0.631,0.091,-0.9426,2,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,2,2,3,3,0,0,0,0,9,5,1,2,1,18,13,7,1,7,8,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,4,2,5,9,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,0,34,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21043386852694512,0.1536346711400889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27994764363410923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604135523215662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538929208257354,0.5079723446959795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17472532529730148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756790568759778,0.0,0.2375345539270092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16149014545239626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973067235108833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22660453314376114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669605425603484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BabyYoda4206969,2020/01/12,"I want to be unloved My entire life Ive had this internal struggle where if I feel like I get too close to someone, something inside of me tells me to absolutely crush it and burn it to the ground. As if my mind is trying to tell me that I dont deserve these nice things.

I will lash out at people harshly and dramatically over seemingly nothing, even if everything else in my life is going well. This applies to friends and romantic intrests, not just one. Sometimes its like something in me says Ive just been friends with someone for too long and they need to go. I say absolutely horrible, offensive, and out of character things and just completely block someone out of my life for months in hopes there is no possible way to recover from the damage I've done. Ironically the only decent relationship I've had without this was with my soon to be ex wife, who I never actually loved, I just thought that being able to tolerate someone is the most I could ever ask for in life anyway.

Yesterday something was different though. A women who Ive been speaking with for about four months, and Ive grown to care about so very much, ended up being a victim of one my mental purges of relationships. Whats different about this one is rather than letting my mind fully take over, I was actively resisting trying to verbally assalt her. Something in me absolutely refused  to let me go. I was sitting down trying to eat dinner and suddenly I felt horrifically sick when speaking to her. I drove home asap and laid down trying to calm down, feeling like I was on some sort of mental rampage where I wanted to hate everyone. I was quite literally twitching and rolling around in physical pain trying not to reach for my phone to scream and holler at this women and tell her terrible things about her and her children. Its like physically something else was trying to take control of me, despite knowing I didnt want to say any of these things.

It feels like something inside of me tried to take control of me, reminding me that I'm not someone worthy of love or success. I managed to minimize the damage done, and I dont think she entirely hates me, but she'll never look at me the same again knowing for no reason at all I started telling her how much I disliked her, and Ive never had the sensation of being taken control of before. It was nothing like whats describe as ""disassociating"", I didnt feel like I was watching myself do things, I felt like I was being forced against my will to do them. I wanted to love but my mouth was forced to hate. 

I'm tired of pushing people away, and I'm scared to death of what this feeling of not being in control of my words and actions means. I have a good deal of other mental health issues from anxiety, depression, and ptsd which I take several medications and get therapy treatments for, but nothing describes what happened to me yesterday. Ontop of that even if I knew what this was, I feel like the label or name would just be my scapegoat. I feel this unbearable guilt inside for these actions I didn't want to do, but I know very well whatever made me do them was entirely part of me. I feel like a disgusting animal, unworthy of any love from anyone, because if I get it I'll rip it to shreds like a dog with a new toy.

I'm scared of what happened to me. I'm scared I'm going to irreversibly damage relationships with people I want to be close with my entire life. I know I'm a decent person, but my drive to kill my own friendships is destroying me and my hopes for not dying completely alone. I feel like a monster and just want to feel normal.",8.086965412774553,6.775744047210299,8.228799545569302,72.68367394597325,62.74821173104435,11.256433560548684,36.86783640494825,10.261626798366184,3.651448169654128,2855,114,533,53,34,936,285,699,0.158,0.726,0.11599999999999999,-0.9896,2,1,6,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,3,6,30,48,8,5,16,0,57,18,1,7,5,114,122,39,3,19,25,2,12,12,2,4,11,6,1,4,38,33,2,6,22,1,0,10,16,21,2,4,30,20,89,27,107,76,8,56,0,4,2,4,43,28,0,13,28,380,127,2,0.04850923572306357,0.0,0.04733801652433129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050240938589050585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597588748851177,0.0,0.037109432552526654,0.0,0.0,0.03391878551347592,0.0,0.0,0.04318350434873218,0.045349587135587385,0.0,0.04557602378821112,0.0,0.0,0.02957077985033185,0.0,0.04127778672629305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049458398790749314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172202145760116,0.0,0.21762893074980905,0.03873067749243053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0500108919970858,0.041780933646995234,0.0,0.05034492805991779,0.10136365333216137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928358038321083,0.11370492597898905,0.0,0.0,0.0496370584886685,0.08104648375489308,0.0,0.0429647845466548,0.0,0.0,0.06407978538717074,0.04387938091766799,0.0,0.04635265355101447,0.04359697317431355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24527727121030446,0.2425850538521215,0.09315294711629883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495623037455383,0.0,0.07603222056129318,0.0,0.1102756662287718,0.040687245419405466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579311389138787,0.0,0.0,0.14367848213530166,0.0,0.05156304917948856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048658718631554784,0.09636123304376222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05063103899977262,0.0,0.0,0.053668282086359965,0.0,0.10663762930913588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920796025621194,0.17131753889867155,0.2843899473377678,0.0,0.0,0.04292914711828542,0.04073554064416577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751259166683037,0.04590061174541375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05284077867216865,0.0,0.04886795156055431,0.14665770034452333,0.0,0.09796099930326524,0.0,0.07743921829809015,0.0,0.07131973960130147,0.03596898363035765,0.11223993926744956,0.04685052214151544,0.0,0.0,0.0475287515226384,0.13963775993280533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861334066450776,0.03689345967726939,0.05161724696475835,0.0,0.0,0.052530775097565666,0.0,0.1008905885039368,0.04235639354493275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05468687463115345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05670470065823916,0.0,0.0,0.05159554331132906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987557352511019,0.0,0.15624229527566486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572947379540605,0.14569862239013967,0.0,0.0,0.04416098632279799,0.0,0.05480162876207269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20550859004865946,0.22406867763867708,0.04797687450805553,0.0,0.034335086720450436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05071238566201357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458916328594816,0.0,0.1695968406122852,0.0,0.05547453867113663,0.0,0.16113690364816838,0.031082759534249462,0.04766007780306755,0.03851091462990115,0.0,0.05575423046681186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23054210778268994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005039953934484,0.20028402842295784,0.038504373397901935,0.0,0.0,0.0872312572800878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04676117218091968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03445956925969822,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Paisley_16,2020/01/12,"New Partner taking anxiety personally-help! Hi y’all!

I’m a female college student and have generalized anxiety and panic attacks. This last semester I started to talk to this guy and we really got along. For the most part my mental health was good so he didn’t necessarily see the effects. We finally started dating about 3 weeks ago after talking for 3 months For the last 2.5 weeks my anxiety has been so bad for just various reasons. It causes me to feel apathetic and not really care about my partner or anyone really. Conversely, when I’m not anxious I’m very lovey-dovey which he has seen for 3 months while talking. He has never experienced anxiety and while willing to learn, still doesn’t understand it for the most part. He gets really upset when I’m not caring even though I explain that it’s because of anxiety and not a reflection on him or personal. Him feeling hurt only increases my guilt and anxiety. It also doesn’t help that we are currently having to do long distance. When I need space to process anxiety(and text less often), he’s hurt and says I don’t care about his feelings. Any advice?",5.1421860189573465,6.896211000000001,6.386300355450237,72.76437944312798,69.33175355450237,10.014336492890996,32.14484597156398,10.270032843473604,3.725731990521327,895,40,152,25,16,301,126,211,0.198,0.7609999999999999,0.04,-0.9848,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,3,1,0,1,14,11,1,3,6,0,14,1,0,3,1,35,34,19,0,1,7,0,3,0,2,1,1,1,0,4,9,12,0,0,9,0,0,1,9,7,0,0,5,7,16,4,19,28,7,25,0,2,2,0,24,2,0,5,22,98,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176790099250987,0.09231699994155307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328358324186479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082120558612584,0.0,0.4780173215454676,0.11765260202643295,0.0,0.07281961254404859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847835682271307,0.0,0.0,0.08695553915909975,0.06348495969795281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185439616250866,0.1069841442547777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878585234052166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157974369527173,0.0,0.0,0.11408420131244415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054410722144294835,0.0,0.0,0.08735069378438065,0.08329313456498606,0.0,0.0,0.10311851755839087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069975548942627,0.0,0.0,0.1396104927457124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229757125219671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16978183499848826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216379102836722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495223373535773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16625282382060858,0.0,0.0,0.07722114491762222,0.08032194908802562,0.10058251845355964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920588542419553,0.0,0.12219005205692984,0.0,0.2255546966870915,0.0,0.0,0.0909341569874258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668681762009368,0.10707694525406196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828191547754552,0.0,0.0,0.08298894968735297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474267237932887,0.0,0.08316919745773023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078303011276931,0.2511199939707359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232053851278744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841713952498434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592936023808137,0.0,0.0,0.16707539594763865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,21-savage-,2020/01/12,Idk what to do I have social anxiety and adhd so whenever I meet new people I lose control in a way and get nervous it’s really starting to effect my life and I hate that this is happening what tips do you have,1.6743333333333332,3.389995933333335,4.530833333333334,82.61625000000002,78.55555555555556,8.055555555555555,24.583333333333336,8.841846274778883,1.9846666666666668,167,6,34,4,4,60,36,45,0.254,0.746,0.0,-0.8625,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,0,3,1,3,1,1,1,0,5,1,0,2,0,5,9,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,3,9,0,4,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,24,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613467045904167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300115956650904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33722677889103697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708757558705402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658813361711101,0.0,0.0,0.2968492075602021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123719915777407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363726294823753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903887937456188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20844660106774307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19261679108746926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3064950256876795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21281565199606767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386577146605514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maklooba,2020/01/12,"Been told to be more religious I am one year cancer free at eighteen. Have been fighting with my mom almost if not everyday about the stupidest shit. I feel numb, I can’t remember that part of my life and it feels like it was in some alternate universe like there’s no way that happened to me. But then other times it all comes crashing down at 3am.( that I had cancer) My family doesn’t believe in therapy. I feel alone, numb, miserable and that the rest of my life is ruined because of this illness. I was thrown back into a normal life and forced to act like it never happened. When I tell my sister I’m sad she tells me to get over it and I have no reason to be, I just need to be more religious. If anything that’s making me less religious. Idk what to do I’m so numb",0.4766557698594305,2.7661008695652183,2.519705786204643,92.09011114743382,86.88819875776397,5.873945733899967,20.27492644655116,7.273561745256523,0.6339118012422365,604,19,130,10,19,202,100,161,0.247,0.693,0.06,-0.9839,0,1,0,0,3,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,6,12,2,1,3,0,15,10,1,2,2,24,27,10,0,4,5,2,3,3,0,0,9,0,0,0,13,7,0,0,5,0,1,2,6,8,0,1,6,3,18,5,19,18,7,17,0,3,0,0,7,7,1,4,10,93,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690784912430763,0.17487727058635946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389488397306624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298349254015254,0.0,0.10292915328741817,0.0,0.0,0.19023568617775566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14544898555724886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591763823508683,0.0,0.2561263041499571,0.12062619305543655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821695070320469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29862629986177003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3577904129287282,0.2474741673290819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270842388302887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19775461912135545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12519984418470345,0.13022722624949834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654367647993685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441686363830762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18284767022346707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736055179689943,0.0,0.0,0.1912736895891932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733216952619273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29516399791951753,0.0,0.1930942411167472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845756375702948,0.0,0.0,0.16134303548228585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340249588197505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087336110254876
mentalhealth,jsullll,2020/01/12,"My life feels meaningless I’ve cried out for help to my friends, family and therapist many times. I still feel hopeless. No one loves me, I feel alone, and I feel numb. I’m medicated for anxiety and depression, have regular therapy sessions and regular psychiatrist appointments. I feel progressively worse every day and the thought of self harm creeps across my mind every day even though my friends reassure me “it’ll all be okay.” My life is not ok, and I feel like I’m out of options. I get progressively worse each day, and each day further lowers my will to continue existence on this earth. I feel alienated, unloved, and unsupported— yet, I’ve done everything I’m supposed to and still feel AWFUL. Someone please help me I’m truly miserable.",6.013357664233574,7.747794167883214,6.376357664233577,73.74847810218981,67.17518248175182,11.319416058394161,34.86788321167883,11.20814326018867,4.4558589781021904,599,29,106,20,10,193,83,137,0.259,0.578,0.163,-0.934,1,1,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,2,5,13,0,1,1,3,6,5,0,0,1,26,21,10,0,0,1,0,8,1,2,2,4,0,0,1,2,13,0,0,9,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,2,8,16,7,11,16,3,14,0,3,0,1,7,5,0,1,10,55,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542422430939266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000283087681586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143629795223965,0.3373083128538991,0.0,0.11262031898623127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338092224951568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636338684824263,0.0,0.22033585847225576,0.0,0.1175154453753684,0.0,0.12326552236299056,0.0,0.52891502630676,0.09341241758379626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20204418230837654,0.0,0.06831483634130597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528655359801112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18471426265116056,0.06388098547585609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801278045014993,0.0,0.0,0.13256649395750436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172334394085813,0.0,0.0,0.13202671681484945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860393894631136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14353129144116686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364074702907061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078949628668787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208844503033612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14953136982391815,0.15181828981175122,0.0,0.0,0.1284675256527228,0.10380599741295876,0.07624512410607302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26650393991876714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pickensonpeacan,2020/01/12,"I am going insane. People are out to get me. The idea of people not liking me has been stamped into my memory for almost 10 years now. But within the last 3 months, it's gotten severely worse. 

For example, I'm backing out of the drive way and a car passing by stops to let me go. I feel like they hate me.

Driving near someone on the road, I feel threatened and have the thought they hate the way I look.

Going to the gym I feel men and women hate my looks and my douchey attire. 

Every where I go I feel out of place. My clothing is old, my personality is pure paranoia, no girlfriend in years, parents are gonna die one day. 

What's left for me? Endless days of getting wasted at home until I die for liver disease? 

My life took a giant turn downhill after a 4 year relationship was broken and my life has been full of addiction, aimlessly drifting, and narcissism. 

Guys absolutely hate how I look. I look like a a male model straight out of a mens magazine. Guys feel threatened by me. 

I'm back on prozac, starting a new semester, and generally am lonely all the time. My social skills are HORRIBLE because I dont want to be build a connection with anyone. In fear of being rejected.",3.0244468085106386,4.875265263829789,4.608670212765958,82.94875,75.08510638297872,7.253191489361702,26.643617021276608,8.07648339933343,1.7656425531914897,927,35,179,15,20,311,145,235,0.259,0.7090000000000001,0.031,-0.9955,1,3,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,2,1,5,10,4,1,16,0,17,5,1,1,2,29,45,10,2,1,2,1,5,3,1,1,4,0,1,7,2,13,0,1,7,1,0,10,3,7,0,1,6,9,27,3,32,35,2,48,0,2,4,0,13,19,0,1,20,112,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330673197771335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407794722032612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267520573237854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15984235976967634,0.0,0.0633590642104777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13406160435881528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21574050774209894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181345474508225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757145187038938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169580834495525,0.26276849062893465,0.07425265308384807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10860564311549857,0.0,0.23627929506105155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058280514426173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41046529586976216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042573409893229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11733228418752653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472257237479848,0.0,0.0,0.11292791471426007,0.106282681009397,0.14682763190420392,0.15233518548874006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34912379698951473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296156593419754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038305569494038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090644554573154,0.0,0.07043043859282527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540979980485977,0.0,0.0,0.14411373451782844,0.09075382766097526,0.10859210092845993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158950005002058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174192879981134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059507387904934,0.08806552967896533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356718271225861,0.0,0.0,0.08689603223566958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251441203748805,0.060606532793186535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547789279396202,0.0,0.11305366990474512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06130476814037815,0.16500079327292413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592073895590697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007961677357868
mentalhealth,EndlessAbyss23,2020/01/12,"Depressed and suicidal because of my living situation, I’m so helpless. I’m so helpless I don’t even know what to do about it anymore to help myself out of this mess, I’m eighteen and I don’t have a job as I’m a full time student with a few online classes on top of a full schedule at high school. (I’m a senior) I can never find time and it seems like i can never just slow down, I’m always moving and doing because that’s what I have to do if I want to get to where I want to be. (I’m so far from it no matter how many hours I put into it) school has ultimately become my happy place. I arrive half an hour early just to get away from home and I don’t even leave the parking lot until almost an hour after dismissal. Coming home takes away all of my energy, my dad is always gone working to pay the bills and my mom who is partially disabled and never leaves the house + doesn’t work is at home all the time. I love her to death but she adds so much onto my plate and contributes majorly to my depression. 

She doesn’t understand boundaries no matter how many times I bring it up to her, she goes into my room when I’m not home. Rearranged my things, takes my things, goes through my stuff and when I come home and things aren’t the way that I left them and things are missing I get so angry all I wanna do is throw my head through a wall because I feel so compromised mentally. We live in a hotel together so I feel confined and trapped I can’t fucking take it anymore, I tried to commit suicide a few months ago just to get away from it but since then they’ve been further up my ass. I was going to move In with a friend then that fell through, then my family friend was going to let me move into his apartment and now I realize he’s unreliable too. Currently I can’t get a job as these classes are so fast pace I’m already behind + where I go to school and where I live is too far away at the moment for me to drive considering I’m sharing a car because mine isn’t fixed yet. I just wish things were different and THEYRE not. My main trigger is just that I’m being so disrespected at home, my room is the only thing that helps my mental health. It being an illustration of me and the energy I put into my space is everything. Like when my mom goes in my room it’s just so negative and it kills me, I don’t like even thinking about my mother in my bedroom. Let alone going through my shit, my memories and knowing she’s judging all of it. When we had a house I would lock my door when I would leave and put my most important stuff in a safe just to keep her away from my personal belongings. She thinks she’s being sweet by “cleaning” and “organizing” my room for me, she’s thrown away things that were seriously important to me and even washed clothes that were damaged from being washed because I’m eighteen. I’m 100% capable of taking care of myself, managing my own responsibilities and making sure my space is kept the way it needs to be. My parents are very controlling and don’t want me to be independent they want to convince themselves that I still need them to do simple things like eat my own food basically they wanna treat me like a toddler just so they have an advantage over me. Our relationship is terrible and has been but my mom describes us as “best friends” like bro no. You make my life a living hell and want me to be who you want me to be just to please the world.. I can’t take my space being invaded and being judged this much anymore. I’m gonna finish my classes get a job and move the fuck out ASAP but until then how can I keep my sanity?",4.162596153846156,4.595891778677462,5.319963731443996,84.416949645749,70.48448043184884,8.442206477732794,27.313343454790825,8.472884824447931,1.6821958839406208,2812,88,603,42,48,935,298,741,0.124,0.74,0.136,-0.4536,9,2,0,0,0,3,47.0,4,2,5,6,42,34,5,0,31,0,61,12,3,8,9,107,122,60,4,14,16,7,2,6,3,3,4,0,13,1,37,40,2,6,11,1,2,19,21,14,0,1,10,3,106,20,86,96,17,105,1,6,0,4,41,49,5,5,41,423,143,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045542364794966976,0.0,0.051446366449319415,0.053210790326419184,0.0566954910818632,0.0,0.08549909800875143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15285571079551988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896207332680991,0.0,0.0,0.156593866535331,0.056741553777335536,0.0,0.0,0.05391670080007645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05238199288953048,0.0,0.0,0.08851299483033928,0.0,0.0,0.057623363179040286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885013919870046,0.0,0.0,0.05367774026173307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05257121355285287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573536323789118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04617408558825172,0.0,0.048433401766796814,0.0,0.051955229407486266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04695739379595202,0.0,0.06212493704414866,0.0,0.11908058557812445,0.0949939045576296,0.16105330274306412,0.0,0.11679430198949725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05469147667901721,0.0,0.0,0.052727339692980685,0.054611053764799,0.0,0.0,0.06887346852536119,0.05428232832881428,0.3092102513252211,0.0,0.15178716847203774,0.11856368009024032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529504092161516,0.09133198353819544,0.056840731592120185,0.0,0.05647060637628575,0.0,0.0,0.1632015934339664,0.05582095955878625,0.105072359716136,0.03628889864554435,0.15060042948749094,0.0,0.1814663496988592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04367865240539701,0.046369498133689034,0.0,0.0685887227213943,0.10417586588003128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355130513011533,0.0,0.0,0.1805153901167092,0.04100840991055365,0.21842130200965132,0.07553560535763433,0.07619037780581928,0.11887468750259154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03907431275042348,0.0,0.0,0.057047770552529214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04486017258431362,0.05367774026173307,0.056396213403500976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15494339003125082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055159372996823774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598795878717714,0.0,0.046771438787220204,0.0,0.0,0.052737467566132665,0.04249935594428938,0.057749588934727925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04102951712818483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762811147655795,0.11239559174675967,0.0,0.04842195314267125,0.0,0.1931445078574989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730592933863619,0.06584025883242202,0.0,0.0,0.119832720708851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034881422268506525,0.0,0.0,0.053484980246321936,0.061799871580088525,0.0,0.0,0.04239117684758459,0.18181993310247613,0.08156090220704734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059080695606501615,0.0,0.0,0.07480573206425596,0.0,0.0,0.07299309949659807,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,annashae,2020/01/12,"Rant: My mom uses mental illnesses as casual adjectives all the time Her favorites are “anorexic” and “autistic”.

Whenever she sees someone underweight she’ll call them “anorexic.” She saw a girl at my church who’s always been skinny and in the car later she called her “anorexic.” 

I run track (jumps) and sometimes she’ll see the long distance kids and say, “I’m so glad you aren’t into cross country, I don’t want you to be anorexic.”

I have a brother who’s severely underweight because a ton of food allergies prevent him from eating much. He always had allergies even as a kid and just learned to not expect food. He’s in college now and every time he visits she’ll say, “You need to eat, you look so much more anorexic!”

Once my brother was telling my mom about a classmate who’s “a little socially out of touch”. She immediately said, “oh, he has Aspergers?” and now refers to him as “the autistic kid.”

Her side of the family suffered from a lot of mental health issues so I guess she grew up with these terms being thrown around. Her mom is bipolar and has paranoia and schizophrenia. Her brother had depression and committed suicide when he was 46, and her cousin is severely autistic. Her parents also divorced when she was a kid. She denies any mental illness but I’ve always strongly suspected she has paranoia. But when she casually throws around these terms it drives me insane. But I can’t tell her off or I’m being “rude.” rant over",3.522637362637361,5.9776595970696,4.195109890109894,83.68739010989013,75.73992673992674,6.837362637362638,28.082417582417587,7.882392219407189,1.993347252747253,1142,48,204,18,26,363,153,273,0.131,0.8170000000000001,0.052000000000000005,-0.9677,2,0,0,0,1,1,27.0,0,4,1,1,14,7,1,0,13,0,22,9,1,1,2,34,33,25,1,3,6,8,1,0,0,3,4,3,0,5,6,16,5,1,3,2,0,8,4,3,0,0,8,8,37,4,25,19,8,31,1,2,4,0,58,12,0,3,11,133,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853247939894406,0.27635168812059996,0.0,0.0,0.07528466812424914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19710569525282826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674860598910508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22608878537636184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953519185045604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265621345758509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312103800325975,0.0,0.093275560794884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436486194125336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677350853421352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195642285802408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767653889091162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155495170427992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095766257659566,0.0,0.09797235677109907,0.092966135811114,0.0,0.0,0.094119272274497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33470034943374044,0.0,0.0,0.3889766789149449,0.0,0.0,0.16276500797436913,0.08208795966100639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178995170291894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292720479222224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530786506047972,0.17607756123322568,0.0,0.0,0.17643855349495338,0.0,0.0,0.2501351685334646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285201245655214,0.0938018211649808,0.0,0.10949221639819988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109566938882226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193525882658878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12910847572756734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561544499015086,0.0,0.0,0.06529795390577077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vuspabalet,2020/01/12,Gotta make it to 22 For life insurance payments I might be able to do it sooner but I wanna experience things,2.3408695652173925,4.12321026086957,4.799347826086958,81.1364130434783,76.82608695652173,8.078260869565218,24.54347826086957,8.841846274778883,1.8630173913043475,88,3,18,2,2,31,20,23,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,4,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,13,5,0,0.4730853061031355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4627682073218534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341541424953019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157881153914494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5018687487244274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31429685605481994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anastastiaxxx,2020/01/12,God I am so Ill sick of feeling it all,-2.7710000000000012,-1.7079640999999979,1.2900000000000027,103.625,90.0,4.0,20.0,3.1291,-0.8489999999999998,29,1,9,0,1,11,10,10,0.4370000000000001,0.327,0.23600000000000002,-0.6214,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BillysGotAGun,2020/01/12,"I stuck on sad mode Always been sad mostly. Then got sick. Then got mental sick. Then git life all turned upside down. Things used to make feel good some ways. Used to see ways out. Don't see ways out no mo. Nothing makes feel good? Feel less bad maybe, but never good. Got hit too hard by thing and now stuck on sad mode. Been stuck on sad mode for like 4-5 months. Been stuck in big sad mode for like 1 month. Things used to help, but now don't help. Mostly just attrition.",-0.6690476190476176,1.5099772653061263,-0.15832653061224278,107.83427891156464,97.77551020408166,3.021496598639456,8.574149659863945,4.604124745555138,-2.323545034013605,364,2,90,1,15,107,58,98,0.27399999999999997,0.56,0.166,-0.8691,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,11,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,5,2,19,24,6,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,10,6,1,5,13,13,5,19,0,5,2,0,2,8,0,3,10,39,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12037328262033793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078964751886075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194416663588086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640156664466773,0.34710664077779485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959187033324907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19393246677286954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021815189721368,0.1413525092361128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931306855158941,0.0,0.1453359363483949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578879553625654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309412394254019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157494982141328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388104462579271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305593428005746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883279846841946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735451926076666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3748336243157461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3444862142686139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,feiiqii,2020/01/12,"I can’t feel any emotions and I don’t know how to start I just need to vent. If anyone can offer advice or help I’d greatly appreciate it. To start I have ocd and adhd, I know there’s something else wrong with me but I have no idea what. I literally can’t feel any emotions, I cry sometimes but I don’t feel a lot. I can laugh and mimic emotions but I don’t feel anything inside. I can’t feel love. I don’t develop crushes and I think talking to guys romantically is a waste of time. I can’t see myself getting married or having kids but I don’t want to die alone. Because of my ocd I don’t like being touched and think intimacy is kinda disgusting. I desperately need to go back to therapy and work all of this out. The last time in therapy it did wonders for my ocd. I got a diagnosis and my therapist brought it from severe and crippling in my everyday life to moderate, but I didn’t wanna talk about it with my mom and she ended up cornering me and guilting me about the price. Recently she laughed about how it was a waste of money and I didn’t talk about anything important with my therapist. I know she doesn’t realize how much it helped but it seriously hurt and made me angry. I just can’t go back and have her ridicule me again but I just want to work out my problems and feel emotions like everyone else. I just want to be normal. I could feel emotions when I was younger but they went away at some point and I don’t remember what it felt like or how to bring it back.",1.2016201456310682,3.3605973203883512,3.2218921925566377,89.16206158980584,82.26860841423948,6.580946601941748,24.21935679611651,7.756953410329674,1.2660298543689328,1168,45,253,21,32,394,143,309,0.175,0.7070000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.9711,0,1,1,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,1,2,18,14,2,1,6,0,29,2,0,5,1,71,60,32,1,10,16,1,9,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,12,20,0,0,17,0,2,5,16,7,0,0,10,10,46,7,32,47,4,27,0,1,1,1,15,9,0,8,16,171,58,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10655294150858644,0.08663821763900979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182575471349592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058464335388865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06199362842753324,0.0,0.14592041643893175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08329965360370101,0.2045238350276857,0.0,0.05404674461665293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078836087036268,0.0,0.09738962444159044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201581707922407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812928951311574,0.4986568149100251,0.0785270713067281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471910586922701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138066250916562,0.0,0.08512818343927915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04632156054176709,0.0,0.10077584697230772,0.0,0.07091006741710941,0.09774874345909566,0.0,0.08778804003723595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885480723516804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949131215308906,0.1000871474001838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14617681915137648,0.07227031032521787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06262367999811877,0.12994543036320375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537616331931565,0.08001975042452958,0.08389290554082822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383834953514423,0.0,0.0,0.06517582173799978,0.13148158298359475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686866929089676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381302663848396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483632356976364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754175294334958,0.0,0.10043529867816113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706511052554273,0.0,0.0,0.10016136365937353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825534451138712,0.08768770716112798,0.0,0.12550901077098178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21378635580530173,0.0,0.0,0.20278249268099105,0.20588383078978287,0.0,0.11362040331916115,0.0,0.0,0.10339754353355712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568831479167371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082189364476545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614875570451983,0.12909210258967638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09693656589710592,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sceerdycat,2020/01/12,"Start of lamictal.... lamictal now Started lamictal 6 months ago, my psych prescribed it off label for anxiety and depression. It didn't seem to help my anxiety but, shockingly enough, my intense depressive episodes were nearly gone... I was more level headed emotionally.

The last 2 weeks, and especially the last week, have been really bad.

My anxiety: tremors, tightness in my chest, hot flashes, constant sweating, nervousness obviously
Depression: this one recently caught me off guard. Last week I had a couple bad episodes, but it happens every now and then. The last few days, however, I've broke down crying every day. Today it was about random, stupid things. I was like a 2 year old who didn't have her nap.

I'm under the assumption I need to come off of lamictal. I'm afraid if I increase my dose the same issues will occur in the future.

Had to vent. Rough day. Any kind words at all will be appreciated.",3.6667737617135217,6.56474649397591,4.640401606425705,78.21902275769749,78.03614457831327,8.508165997322624,27.896921017402946,9.150863307647796,2.9974374832663995,722,31,123,20,18,234,112,166,0.23199999999999998,0.682,0.086,-0.9802,1,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,0,3,12,1,2,8,0,14,4,3,0,2,16,24,7,0,2,3,0,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,1,1,0,4,2,10,0,1,11,3,13,2,16,10,6,37,0,4,0,0,3,10,0,3,24,73,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533083987722376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847632750778939,0.0,0.2985914793840962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21726562538958255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207452752826244,0.0,0.14059802490150106,0.0,0.0,0.14395946611806396,0.1429149859931463,0.2517222109019103,0.0,0.33617950827048315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635138419903196,0.0,0.13443395234123914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192393025294534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505202781681795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13352596859342666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720709833633049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357965329191993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354850500219615,0.0,0.4242139939267713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356306593819518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384911671377006,0.0,0.0,0.09647171707560533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13652403057452098,0.0,0.08816297951065277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833490335399844,0.0,0.12846366815201946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844332945557524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18417894738988666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864364361191743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332497679161455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130887986447825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378379564102817
mentalhealth,gaby_dude,2020/01/12,"Graduated in December After graduating college, what am i supposed to do to keep myself mentally healthy?

I feel stuck in life. I spend all day, everyday, every week at home. I apply to numerous jobs and nothing. Not even an interview. 

 I have no friends so i don’t go out much. I ca t seems to find anyone im into on tinder. So basically i have no reason to go out.

 My option atm is going back to uni for a masters which i really don’t want to do. However, at home i don’t want to do anything productive either. I don’t hv motivation to study, review, or learn anything. At the same time, im miserable not doing anything.   

I... don’t know what to do with my life... Im scared i end up stuck in life. I have no one to share my fears or feelings with so I ignore them. At night I wish i could just hand myself to end this feeling of being lost.",0.2578409090909091,2.41873092045455,3.3294999999999995,86.86550000000004,86.38636363636364,6.474545454545456,21.86818181818181,7.734863291789972,1.1565872727272732,646,23,138,13,20,231,104,176,0.141,0.74,0.11900000000000001,-0.6072,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,1,3,6,7,0,3,3,0,17,4,1,2,1,30,32,6,0,4,6,0,4,0,1,0,3,0,2,0,4,6,0,2,9,0,2,3,10,5,0,1,3,4,23,2,29,27,4,24,0,2,0,0,4,12,0,4,9,95,27,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095582058029158,0.0,0.33747114176439524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10511192608991828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091418164756905,0.0,0.0,0.08815856741082062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24214679078748585,0.0,0.0,0.09028739786303866,0.0,0.11517352458823553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15382267179841885,0.20735506311753854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493902237800862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561213576560836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330649882311125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742374408433899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44297021500927214,0.0,0.13565115845810052,0.12150300317657535,0.0,0.0,0.07512536134782988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896604232115496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922144984598318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775891061099274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048837813617602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828132703770473,0.0,0.13116492105980945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926297517944178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875719075281533,0.1405477787823685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685802689417093,0.0,0.0,0.12444425392688452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970940124636687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16125543359135186,0.0,0.10965047487070774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719535846824073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kimberlyy_clark,2020/01/12,"Youtube mental health video ideas Hi there. I have a YouTube channel about mental heath (I am a certified mental health worker and a recovered bulimic) I make videos giving advice/tips/sharing my own stories. If there’s anything you all could think of that would help you. I would love to hear it. My goal is to help as many people as possible, and I love hearing what people need. 💛 sending my love to each of you wherever you’re at in your battle. 

Adding a link to my YouTube as I may have something that could help you already. I’d love for you to check it out. 
[my recovery](https://youtu.be/xV4VzRBNW5o)",2.8160334448160533,5.601050295652177,3.0460869565217408,88.97963210702343,80.82608695652173,5.973244147157192,24.49832775919733,7.321109707123232,1.2244247491638802,484,18,91,7,13,148,72,115,0.022000000000000002,0.7509999999999999,0.228,0.9769,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,6,0,2,3,5,1,0,4,0,9,6,0,1,1,16,19,6,0,6,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,17,4,15,14,3,4,0,0,0,4,18,3,0,2,0,58,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549877167562118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155766298922382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22427239133918134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473039443845913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985790358684997,0.3165899133574049,0.0,0.2824177397920445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15854854960453152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5070387436979731,0.0,0.09375004367158978,0.14239209578883485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4246152571304692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414031583099408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19473773773444755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583338704931227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081236318162683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999332391654223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19954027408637706,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sugargirl123,2020/01/12,"Possibly Enabling Addiction I have a close friend of mine who deals with alcohol addiction. She has a friend who drinks with her. My friend one night took 20-25 shots of alcohol right in front of me. I told her that maybe she should slow down and stop. Her friend said ""no shes fine."" And told her to stop counting and pretty much told her to keep going. 
I confronted her friend about it recently and why she didn't limit her at all. Her friend told me ""she's an adult. She can do whatever the fuck she wants.""
I don't know how to feel about it. Isn't this enabling someone's addiction?",2.2946533127889057,4.362512779661017,2.8936363636363645,93.42308936825887,77.98305084745763,7.3417565485362095,21.7442218798151,8.296473431620573,0.9967355932203396,460,13,102,9,11,143,72,118,0.09300000000000001,0.731,0.17600000000000002,0.91,0,0,3,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,3,9,2,0,4,0,9,7,0,1,1,17,21,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,6,1,5,1,0,1,6,7,3,4,2,1,0,3,4,2,0,1,7,2,23,7,13,13,2,13,0,0,0,1,30,5,1,0,5,63,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39194494553473147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25615488311070617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235545310704121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11740209297416435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059703599844885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5555498927277744,0.11079441126060084,0.0,0.0,0.06811045396954292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652339634316588,0.0,0.0,0.06586346372565438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040001946173386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880995782180428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246604846141928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120980968039282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351067913596164,0.0,0.12192505379774725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833209471113752,0.0,0.0,0.10234664255056948,0.11399966872894185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10154394956955884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003909213355057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4580666446580148,0.1331517719250124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068745634203509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814112034311874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Unfriendly_Meme,2020/01/12,"Dissociation and strange actions I’m a 14m and I’ve been diagnosed with depression and I’ve had it since I’ve been at least 12. I have existential crises 2-3 times a week, but this isn’t the issue  although it may be related. When I’m completely alone I do strange things. When I’m doing these things I feel completely dissociated and my actions are repetitive and often last for a few minutes. Examples of things I’ll do are grabbing clumps of my hair and squeezing them and repeating this action for several minutes. 


For more background I use drugs. At the age of 13 I took 3 doses of lsd and I regularly smoke pot 

Please feel free to pm me if you have any questions,

( I will be posting this to multiple subs )",2.481428571428573,4.801544225352114,4.237545271629781,82.74704225352116,78.5774647887324,8.000804828973843,28.45271629778672,8.841846274778883,2.50123782696177,568,26,113,14,14,191,90,142,0.086,0.8590000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.2475,0,1,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,5,0,15,4,1,1,0,17,22,13,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,9,9,0,0,3,0,1,4,1,1,0,0,4,5,12,2,12,14,3,15,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,4,8,70,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21097435435879108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13852468382398553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4271563868786003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17544866294761802,0.2067537474581733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362302262937699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20599620702053428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21261248423053505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660447235935583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22360417197518634,0.0,0.0,0.1950906844108692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22819341714760355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301258410090329,0.0,0.168504811261169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4059926645314227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878056465388953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22632097034678345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759335548121264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339785666503714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Katiari,2020/01/12,"I have a whole host of mental health issues, and I desperately need recommendations for good residential treatment programs in the U.S. I suffer from severe depression, severe anxiety, BPD, PTSD, SIB, atypical anorexia, suicidal ideations, body dysmorphia, body dysphoria, abandonment, abuse, and I'm trans (which isn't a mental illness, but it affects my mental health).  

I can't handle life like this, and I REALLY need somewhere I can work on my issues in an intensive treatment setting.  

I'm in the U.S., and am willing to travel anywhere in the country if i need to.  I'd really appreciate first hand referrals, internet searches have only gotten me so far.",7.551052631578948,9.407467394736845,8.081535087719299,62.50282894736844,63.64912280701755,11.314035087719299,37.9342105263158,11.20814326018867,5.172600000000001,529,27,74,16,8,175,80,114,0.18,0.718,0.102,-0.6487,0,0,0,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,6,0,7,7,3,1,0,11,13,7,1,4,2,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,1,10,2,10,11,1,9,0,3,0,0,0,6,0,1,2,45,13,2,0.0,0.17460524531650887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273499520201925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273819958848855,0.185602990848462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692657985440395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534989859594606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360405701832132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132874690887904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3076247490787343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408934115834917,0.07199584477442794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.445532416085228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3278112532103746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207888974900722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722635922171566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888135505193566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33296447456103495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611950697139642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16452947252450356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728459192839744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ellivro,2020/01/12,"What do I have? Hi, everyone! 

I’ve been trying to do some research on what I’ve been experiencing since I was a kid. I would consider it some form of anxiety but I’ve never really found a specific name for it (if there is one).

So here it is:

Whenever someone says  or does something inappropriate or rude/disrespectful, I tense up, my heart starts beating really hard, and it gets difficult to breathe. And if that person is someone I know, seeing them instantly triggers these effects. Some days, I also feel like throwing up when I hear or see the “bad things” happen.

Or another case is when some people have an argument and it gets really aggressive, (or if I can sense that things are about to get heated) again, my heart beats really fast, it gets hard to breathe, and I keep thinking “I don’t want to be here” while wanting to hide in a corner. On top of that, even though the argument has nothing to do with me, I feel like I’m part of the issue and somehow it’s my fault so I keep apologizing in my head. 

Aside from this, I’m pretty ok. It’s just that whenever these episodes occur, I end up replaying the incident for a few days and it causes me to blank out from time to time.

Thanks in advance <3",3.7822916666666657,5.132063312500005,5.146666666666668,81.91166666666669,72.125,9.0,27.5,9.444778638647367,2.3495000000000004,945,34,192,22,18,316,137,240,0.147,0.769,0.084,-0.9328,0,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,5,14,8,1,0,9,1,18,5,5,3,1,38,39,22,0,6,10,0,4,2,0,1,0,2,0,2,20,8,0,2,6,0,0,2,2,4,0,1,4,9,20,4,27,33,7,25,0,0,2,0,8,11,0,13,14,132,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137210259973876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329217661567947,0.09697313499635164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058415775850147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022023339755795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16350293712146166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109309118392026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227414609572736,0.0,0.0,0.08372558203486001,0.0,0.0,0.12112721270742248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819008158611225,0.1811186271615257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898878124931202,0.0,0.0,0.2649131602188173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209585599794454,0.0,0.22710899948808974,0.0,0.13009512332338816,0.0,0.1428707999846303,0.3004288706747911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230734727567806,0.0,0.2253450625606465,0.0,0.0,0.06966547661466232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385972540249734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097767225508488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121632250105911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589770074553386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13727167446682995,0.0,0.08788131018535779,0.11068431896331166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128963259804691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32482978139739305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080680403410926,0.0,0.0,0.2020269540497387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485943316941017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21481128516304032,0.0975881360907076,0.0,0.0,0.08972330673450248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670608286491428,0.0,0.0,0.16843103907072834,0.0812244334942999,0.12454373028182596,0.0,0.1478327246317575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606356698706424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495358749202218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900486003661439,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ParisKillton187,2020/01/12,"I had a really bad panic attack today in public and I think it was my fault. I will try to keep this on the short side.

 I was in the hospital late last year due to overwhelming stress due to my fiance having left me. I was not diagnosed in my month stay but I am on meds and it was clear that something was severely wrong.

Since leaving the hospital I have been kind of minding my own business and focusing on work and my father.

My father is a 75 year old man who is crippled by a nerve disorder and I spend most of my time with him now, he is a very public figure in my city and well respected by almost all. Even though he can be a little crotchety sometimes I love him no matter what crazy shit he says or does, or even if its 4 in the morning and he's drunk off his ass and Im helping him get to the washroom and he calls me vulgar names.

We go grocery shopping every saturday which includes a trip to Safeway, the bakery and this fancy wine store.

Today I dropped him off at the wine store to pick out his wine and went to the gas station nearby for cigarettes. When I was exiting I heard and then saw a man in a black truck pressing and pushing a woman who was paying for her own gas to give him 20 dollars for gas that he saw in her wallet as she paid credit card for hers. He was being really, really scary and pushy about it...bullying her even. I Snapped.

I am 6'5 and I go to the gym every other day, I have long hair and a scruffy beard, I know I look intimidating but believe me when I say I am usually a teddy bear. In this instant I was not.

As I fumbled through my cigarette pack I yelled almost trembling at first; ""Hey, do you want to fight?!""

I could hear the dude slightly cower in his voice when he responded; ""Mind your own business buddy.""

at that point, I screamed louder and I couldn't control myself ""GET OUT OF THE CAR RIGHT NOW!!""

He then peeled off and screamed something at me and called me ""A fucking psycho!""

The woman looked grateful and was trying to say something to me but I felt blind almost or light headed and I felt like I was going to cry so I got back into my car and took a couple breaths and went to the wine store to pick up my dad. When I got to the wine store the clerk was addressing my dad by first name and joking around with him, he asked ""Hey Al! why are all your sons so tall? how did you do it? hey! are you the funny one?"" and I felt dizzy and responded ""I don't know."" I felt completely helpless. I grabbed a cooler from the freezer beside me and just started gulping it down as I burst into tears.

Luckily my father was on his toes and looked at the clerk and was like ""I will take that too if you don't mind."" to which the clerk inquired ""Is he ok?"" and my dad was just like ""He'll be fine."" I stormed out of the store and chugged the rest of the can on the sidewalk and asked him if he was mad at me as he came out the door. He asked what happened and I told him the story. He was silent for a bit but then he responded ""I would have knocked that guys fucking block off bud, don't worry. You did the right thing.""

I cant help but remember what that fucker said ""Psycho."" He even looked genuinely scared. I let my anger get the best of me and I felt helpless. I thought I was doing so well... I dunno... I can just feel him saying it almost. I wish I could say I have never experienced something like this but it happens more than I would like to admit. My dad says I should tell my social worker about it on monday but that he doesn't feel too concerned about it. 

I feel embarrassed for myself and I wish I could understand how to deal with situations far better than I do. I thought I was making progress but sometimes I think I am only kidding myself.",1.9614650278021664,3.68231274771242,3.3006321334503967,91.73523266022829,77.73202614379085,6.135791630084871,22.398302604623947,6.951781913908793,0.5326628621597895,2872,84,628,30,67,936,332,765,0.139,0.7609999999999999,0.099,-0.9890000000000001,1,0,11,0,1,0,87.0,1,7,0,8,29,37,8,6,42,1,63,19,6,6,4,119,119,66,0,13,19,8,11,5,1,6,2,13,2,6,29,47,7,3,19,9,11,11,10,21,2,3,42,34,115,16,82,63,10,87,0,3,8,5,96,44,5,12,35,423,144,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25421976226139553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056500781881242634,0.17800457627016014,0.07220504241534924,0.0,0.04880367045230749,0.052993884804019384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150772188435127,0.06660670036248767,0.05613308896703983,0.0692916062544744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961769706308476,0.07259151932166329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654593963104041,0.0,0.0711857741328954,0.15202426904315033,0.07022713648538904,0.06971761217089407,0.040932193248791514,0.06543365442496067,0.0,0.06441960284092971,0.0,0.0,0.07274086412957803,0.0,0.055542066712768345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16768245337012208,0.0,0.10695058016588097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627535659796453,0.0,0.30470051157204503,0.0,0.0,0.10797323680219734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735196039895335,0.09947965026618504,0.060885157286035586,0.1082125245224015,0.0,0.1015237630814146,0.0,0.0,0.06284419478616675,0.11225068664517096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513740758849414,0.0,0.07153406902086418,0.0,0.08508373867318407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855730901238437,0.0,0.0,0.05641407922563036,0.0,0.06609309798230872,0.06976170096423849,0.05173562887847006,0.07159568965752976,0.06720440649638393,0.06895915128533507,0.0649012557903234,0.0,0.15503850588784915,0.0636125169620414,0.0,0.05616798391558121,0.2131915815042534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057283164999316474,0.0,0.042365987113061485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049964571650229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192256504120358,0.0,0.050660274659284125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048951132479519516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659993946371863,0.0,0.04300817280035934,0.04827096247762063,0.0,0.07446708519688867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059998630445023765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12197941779397742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189789714931565,0.1084041966278429,0.06037346314655636,0.3028381255648232,0.06354344641713097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170179725151479,0.06514991918883935,0.0525021343104135,0.07134170876840452,0.0,0.0646985560969014,0.0,0.1954458563536048,0.12554474041905678,0.0,0.044923617824051736,0.06764940821319403,0.0,0.0,0.07270341654981477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04772071796168336,0.0,0.055474620712804235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042165920452036064,0.08133662347221267,0.06235787718032273,0.10077444248060813,0.03700922906740983,0.0,0.12032220194675206,0.06064725888739887,0.07051628908086942,0.08618244094239999,0.0,0.0,0.0660733687391215,0.0,0.0,0.06990203233750535,0.05236849385072702,0.03743560475194794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141323362969152,0.11767262210944505,0.05727081505110612,0.0,0.1459722175531933,0.0,0.0,0.04620611894889319,0.06445575415750322,0.0,0.090172978586484,0.06939328439905812,0.0,0.08174378817049698
mentalhealth,unmarked_graves,2020/01/12,"Those of you who work full time... how do you do it? how did you find a work situation that works for you?

i’ve been out of college a few years, never kept a job for over a year for reasons outside of my control (contracts ended, mass layoffs etc.) but I had to leave my most recent position. TLDR they refused to accommodate my recently diagnosed ADHD and paid me to leave, yes it’s almost definitely illegal. 

Now i’ve been freelancing while on severance and i keep getting worried that no job will ever accommodate my mental health and maybe i should continue with more flexible contracted work. I have anxious and depressive symptoms as well as ADHD and C-PTSD making it difficult for me to focus in an office at times, and i sometimes have flare ups of ptsd that make it extremely difficult for me to be around other people or leave my bed. i can get some work done some of those days i just can’t do it around other people because i’m barely functional. every time i look for work i get scared about being trapped in an office 9-5 job situation with limited flexibility but i think it might be the only way i can earn enough to support my bills. 

i’m not really sure what to do so i want to know what other people have found work for them. i appreciate anything you’re comfortable sharing.",4.434078947368422,5.977800599206352,5.831044277360068,76.88003759398498,70.78571428571428,9.114786967418548,29.13617376775272,9.549672527348893,2.791687301587301,1029,40,189,24,19,347,152,252,0.155,0.721,0.12300000000000001,-0.7875,3,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,4,2,10,10,9,0,1,7,1,21,3,0,6,3,40,37,15,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,17,11,0,5,5,0,2,0,4,4,1,0,8,1,28,5,34,23,8,26,0,1,1,0,9,11,0,6,14,135,45,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22461154948031745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357420556634637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556911320829432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689935719540994,0.16637623232385673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569647486068471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480935396771994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06026592789282085,0.0,0.08048622301497176,0.09484727867129987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562927027867732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276677730635072,0.09655628141572012,0.10421870073964934,0.0,0.08452864333136581,0.07873357668859629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540935197534091,0.0,0.0,0.10246039632253927,0.0,0.0,0.14646743684867042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993303574940752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27819677114705743,0.08306046074997704,0.0,0.0,0.0513563201272565,0.0,0.0,0.2968423332246292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847239213519977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475390746569988,0.0,0.09388060683477642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417313390299747,0.09913306484109237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207249810318295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107105955235454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19435425917112292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184703301145344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05986488233111518,0.09607962731656997,0.18453632996367705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355728232200712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556911320829432,0.0,0.0,0.21007788418541345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924219993225158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604315274474524,0.08807319369697199,0.0971277669332968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598774057308377,0.0,0.0,0.16347002346945538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05511777594941472,0.07417430186072824,0.0,0.0,0.08402055452662736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4762164175027002,0.09490050554396236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035429456775175
mentalhealth,minormovie101,2020/01/12,"I need to help my friend Hi all- 

I am a high school male and one of my best friends (16, female) has serious problems with her mental health and substance abuse. I want to help her but I have no idea where to start. I'm not claiming to be an expert on mental health or substance abuse but I have talked to her friends and they are worried about her and I feel obligated to help. 

She has had a problem with depression for a really long time and over this summer she started to smoke a lot of weed and drink. I think she has a couple of friends that are influencing her poorly (again I am not claiming to be an expert so I am not sure about this) by pressuring her to smoke, drink and hook up with boys. They also influence her to skip class a lot and I'm worried that this will soon cause her grades to plummet. Her parents have not been very helpful. She goes to almost no classes on certain days and I want her to be successful in life and this worries me.

Before the summer began she broke up with her long-time boyfriend and she was heartbroken. Since then she has talked to one other boy seriously and he ended it about a month ago. Since then the problems have become so much worse. Not a day has gone by where she doesn't skip more than 50% of classes in a day and she gets high every day. I'm really worried about her. 

I was planning on talking to her with some of her other friends during lunch this week, but I need help on what to tell her because neither I nor her friends know what to do. We are all scared to go to any adults because we know that she will never forgive us and we still value her friendship. Please help us help her we are really worried. If you have any other communities that would be able to help that would also be appreciated. Thank you so much you have no idea what this means to me.

\-Matthew",2.6905843495934967,4.54725230894309,3.4253446815718185,91.04297637195124,76.04607046070461,6.130115176151763,23.45536924119241,6.9077264865688965,0.639745867208672,1438,44,304,14,32,454,167,369,0.177,0.66,0.163,-0.8061,1,0,4,0,2,0,30.0,6,3,2,3,14,21,0,2,13,0,33,6,0,3,5,62,52,27,0,10,10,1,1,0,6,4,3,0,0,4,18,23,3,0,8,2,1,2,12,9,0,2,6,1,56,12,48,37,10,36,0,2,0,0,65,13,0,6,21,221,74,6,0.07329923460584965,0.17369521405677915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497534885534371,0.0,0.07339859540525652,0.0,0.0,0.11723474286402782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969198613966852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936506615365486,0.08095324579377271,0.06237224990585154,0.0,0.07692302451543563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529850514364164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110420891764866,0.0,0.1890877697055606,0.0,0.0631325233595977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361068920734632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06492136549530744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061757766525494175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03706229541229163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3397848409791984,0.0,0.038295824767215214,0.0,0.04165764420802872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15582731751856188,0.0,0.0,0.3930474549979832,0.15488933153663534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654918277130073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056668479756804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051773417118011214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973503206755993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463277611291755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984435489272347,0.0,0.0,0.14773677663745186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05850674974689993,0.0,0.10776674270665572,0.1087009073780165,0.056532888482509126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933891673605108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813901256502128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08046054825018324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21041240471980646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087209986803564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733853209953197,0.07418273868049048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12126776863869836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376315104622087,0.0,0.058536863440712836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908366115520358,0.0,0.0,0.1767454447515691,0.06406676184005694,0.06748408716231663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046967189842055806,0.0,0.0,0.04274137315550114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17633990826824414,0.0,0.0,0.06047954506667984,0.08646757537642713,0.0,0.058796224659138724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721946538587947,0.07469818219216456,0.10413934641242892,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BurnerAccount913,2020/01/12,I'm not feeling alright and I need someone to talk to I'm not doing well at the moment mentally. From the anxiety of school and stuff that's going on at home I'm at my limit. I have suicidal thoughts and have breakdowns nearly every night. I'm too scared to ask friends for help or call a suicide Hotline. I really need someone to talk to.,1.1121428571428569,3.4972178571428607,3.1625000000000014,87.97375000000002,84.71428571428572,5.785714285714287,25.892857142857146,7.1686216300943375,1.4412857142857147,270,12,53,4,8,91,47,70,0.243,0.6809999999999999,0.076,-0.8939,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,11,13,4,2,2,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,1,4,3,13,12,0,8,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,2,33,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15189144246449274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856189580760533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027433989159232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16728829959312794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039366264939327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15340048567404765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284145876194925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13308496263963004,0.0,0.19916345934310248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20009332867346044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944470142389589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18632724097322292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12719724914980868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19878480481212116,0.20094483513903785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364642791252776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22729409678944085,0.4343664824421786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191765352148373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762780434551138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785217475032732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EvanFromMars,2020/01/12,"I need a fucking outlet. I'm so tired. I just want to fucking die. My brain rips itself apart every fucking day.

I love music but none of it brings me any joy. I can't play any better after 5 years of trying. I can't write songs, or poems, or stories, and if I write bad ones I just want to kill myself even more for having no skill.

I play the same videogames over and over for years and never get better.

I can't paint

I'm physically unable to exercise.

I just want to be fucking lynched like the worthless shit sack I'm. I've got nothing.",0.7139473684210529,2.7989320614035123,2.5027192982456117,94.03986842105265,83.64912280701755,4.5017543859649125,19.149122807017545,5.46131890053228,-0.334582456140351,421,11,92,2,12,139,73,114,0.295,0.5820000000000001,0.124,-0.9775,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,3,5,15,6,0,3,0,5,9,2,0,1,18,20,8,3,5,7,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,4,0,1,6,8,0,1,1,1,13,7,11,18,3,9,0,1,0,5,3,3,5,3,6,52,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248870950852036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13806019285619553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924769571833961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18458508335176912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663695471381268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716070075698478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921199651852664,0.0,0.13931435465044084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6114529759291506,0.08638845627696969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224535587777586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829350769812132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078156980629357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149234668046436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260479623266733,0.12752797451337364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15865761159565914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204531717515906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16972921387138065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19004529390492186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226167378866117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925828233307917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21295972547305764
mentalhealth,Pacolay,2020/01/12,"My life is falling apart When I was in elementary school I suffered from extreme bullyng to the point, where once they destroyed my arm, they locked me for days in the bathroom, kicked me every day at the exit, etc. This leads to several emotional and psychological problems such as multipersonality and alexithymia syndrome, besides I am in high school and I have several friends I am not well although I always smile, I feel that nobody understands me and I feel that I have to shout what I have to all so that They understand me but I feel that they would not look at me the same and would put me all aside",9.943879310344826,7.609118732758625,9.12351724137931,70.97320689655173,59.94827586206896,12.038620689655176,40.44137931034483,10.355215969177356,3.95309172413793,487,20,93,8,5,154,71,116,0.079,0.875,0.046,-0.3933,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,4,1,5,5,1,0,4,0,9,2,1,1,2,20,15,10,0,3,3,0,3,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,5,0,0,3,2,3,1,0,1,5,23,2,12,12,4,16,0,1,1,0,5,10,0,0,3,72,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14917859000472364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23124660318903945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016702877357218,0.0,0.0,0.19994897098141146,0.0,0.0,0.15105444156224893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719540222139218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385143178287342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894233130140652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126633540209103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505533454795187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19093153183464828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694812613885021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17155050601125424,0.0,0.18022986591857024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3628898127432748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40507961438033946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732817831018576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611977821605612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25471631669991274,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,csteezy23,2020/01/12,"Constant Deja Vu I'm pretty sure I've reached the lowest point I've ever been at mentally in my life. I feel as if I'm stuck in a time loop and I've currently experienced everything I've done in the passed 2 weeks over again down to conversations, my own thoughts, and emotions/actions. I have had major anxiety and depression for 2 years now and have not been medicated. Has anyone ever experienced similar symptoms to where they think they are reliving the same days over again due to trauma/anxiety. I really think I am losing my mind this time and any type of suggestion someone could give me would be greatly appreciated. It's extremely difficult to process.",6.654340000000001,7.6124887840000035,7.495750000000001,69.15162500000002,65.16,11.69,35.625,11.45678717892309,4.53022,538,25,93,17,8,180,88,125,0.125,0.7909999999999999,0.084,-0.6326,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,1,6,5,0,0,4,0,12,3,0,0,3,18,20,7,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,6,3,10,2,14,11,3,23,0,2,0,0,5,9,0,1,13,57,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672589557077008,0.0,0.2851178667455381,0.0,0.0,0.13030180068791244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20138054011741746,0.0,0.1487870789808042,0.0,0.0,0.12018176126938368,0.0,0.1605048885509983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19070301466919676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371324922215376,0.0,0.0,0.16748135356729402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422527847827103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787660239294713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054539734287299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316260795897275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084804600226468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877302500037942,0.18779920084940704,0.0,0.18816261274053375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17616307625652852,0.0,0.0,0.1895871961107964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193819998844636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578956258887004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756347559759813,0.19369130296915835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388139478669108,0.0,0.14794284189275955,0.2173269487666509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14948050519669034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323792658697812,0.0,0.0,0.1200047157924012
mentalhealth,kreri222,2020/01/12,"I don't want to fear my birthdays anymore Yesterday I turned 27. For each birthday I panic a little more about getting older and I want this to stop. I've always felt a little bit behind in many aspects of life and I think that plays a big role in this age anxiety (because this has been going on since the day I turned 18 pretty much) so it doesn't just relate to actually getting what's considered ""old"". 

I think I'm stuck in some type of thought pattern that strictly follows a societal mold of where and what you're ""suppose"" to be and how you're ""suppose"" to act at a certain age and I desperately want to get out of that. Instead of just enjoying my life and not give a fuck about the judgement of others I keep looking around me and comparing myself to what other people my age are doing and where they are in life. E.g. I look at a person a few years older than me behaving kind of youngish and I think to myself ""phew, I can still behave kind of immature for a few more years because this or that person does"" or I see a person younger than me who is already far into their career and I stress out about just being in the very beginning of my career (if even). Just all these completely useless thoughts  that takes up so much of my mental energy and and is giving me anxiety that should not even have to exist. 

I think about this stuff almost on the daily and I don't want to do that anymore. I just want to be happy and enjoy my life, because that's the only thing that matters in the end. ""The less you give a fuck, the happier you'll be"" sort of thing. 

Any thoughts on this and can you relate?

Maybe daily meditation would be the a good solution? Less worrying and more presence in the now, just train my mind to shut the thoughts that don't serve me off.",4.682718304713188,5.20302037254902,5.436587504567047,83.73085495067596,69.36414565826331,8.225502374862991,28.406893192059435,8.18289091462,1.7840443064182194,1391,46,282,18,23,453,173,357,0.078,0.809,0.114,0.9507,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,3,2,0,21,14,2,3,23,0,23,6,0,1,2,58,57,22,0,8,11,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,27,21,0,2,9,1,0,3,6,6,0,0,7,4,36,8,50,42,13,43,0,1,3,2,14,25,2,6,15,207,63,3,0.0,0.0,0.08967096448537998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201413031351972,0.0,0.10140242478999348,0.0,0.07645948284429058,0.0,0.0,0.06248805820616645,0.0,0.14059053812615266,0.0,0.18225952272269386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180119846844633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804508581815086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031961057341453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634446522296984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05926117041585181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804131813975337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813868842017248,0.0,0.0,0.121384387888967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034013123737407,0.0,0.0,0.08822839681380283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990085240648553,0.14402552219719586,0.2644465440534554,0.052222959874751014,0.07707261112505992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978181552848712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167567133584153,0.0,0.19137769232323404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596172814027297,0.0,0.18419497755010228,0.0,0.0,0.15432819059996905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316160071335572,0.09231542324003636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260307327791392,0.0,0.09278227030235207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350988128876867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642264557522508,0.0,0.0,0.06988615821625738,0.0,0.10781261095396756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370465743247151,0.2407032829107385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348472695621564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322408981340263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07601200135194845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338312880565995,0.07682379454443335,0.10525919126262408,0.0,0.10519157255352106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908952037593569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220946936540292,0.2355165028826829,0.0,0.2918002156936506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998989294632298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581851819291525,0.27099424398558924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331831813148253,0.0,0.06527571364718351,0.0,0.0,0.11834773992600887
mentalhealth,Throwaway125752,2020/01/12,"My mom has serious mental health issues and I just found out I also posted this in r/relationship_advice but I need all the help I can get

Tonight after a fight with her boyfriend, I (17M) found out that my mom (40-ish F) has been mentally ill for a long time. She can have rapid mood swings where she stops making logical sense, then she ends up crying and hitting herself in the head. A couple months back, she made an attempt on her life with headache meds (I believe it was something like acetaminophen), which sent her to the hospital. She passed the hospital off as a sudden heart problem, but I still figured it out. Her boyfriend is extremely reasonable, but his responses to when she’s in a “bad place” can trigger her even more. It seems that this may have been a life long mental health issue, but I’m not sure. She has been twice divorced (once to my dad), and has struggled with relationships for as long as I can remember. I spend most of my time at my dads house, due to the custody agreement, and this problem has been mostly hidden until now. She has seen therapists and is taking medication, but the medication doesn’t seem to be working. She usually smokes pot until she passes out. I’m worried her boyfriend will move out and she will get worse. My (23M) brother used to live with us and he knew all about her problem, but moved out a couple months ago. She has told me that she wouldn’t really take her life because of my brother and I, but I’m not sure if I believe her. I don’t know what to do, whether to tell my Dad or not, because if I do he may just have me stop coming to her apartment which could push her over the edge. Should get help for her or what? Any advice?",5.189354655294956,5.618149868656715,5.249339019189764,85.84034825870648,68.22388059701493,8.291400142146411,29.08670931058991,8.11559375814309,1.7258500355366024,1326,44,276,16,21,415,176,335,0.136,0.8220000000000001,0.042,-0.985,0,0,2,0,2,0,43.0,1,0,0,2,11,12,1,1,15,0,33,10,2,5,4,67,56,28,0,9,17,7,0,1,0,6,8,0,0,0,13,19,0,2,10,0,1,7,6,7,0,1,12,1,51,4,39,35,5,48,0,0,1,0,45,17,0,10,24,190,64,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818517771723436,0.07999566628348705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216791854292517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061368865230117677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06939189667419125,0.07534978710828989,0.11002354177959266,0.0,0.0,0.2033476745670098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773702604242391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720523154074433,0.1997060529896285,0.09912855519466944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992920361833171,0.0,0.0,0.05960516581281159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19789529439249576,0.0,0.0,0.1414459516769688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261615397191414,0.19184983704848024,0.0,0.10693931422340447,0.12097700742474232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041292061637646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883821212335444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04959562160244633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19122555266377372,0.044088552690331316,0.0,0.07968691139308584,0.23958871741480045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539084697192584,0.060238424139073765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002404959665347,0.1818222291538726,0.27283351509198633,0.0,0.0,0.21138484971551294,0.14406344900138476,0.1918297135363047,0.0,0.06691461965585813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610668083598532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428554305778686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642859589179598,0.0,0.0,0.2590533303229405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578124765172417,0.09278563628174866,0.0,0.0968880473055264,0.10222861116465574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643090966253248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947407102679777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206879956136167,0.1508956824457168,0.0,0.09434239324879944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17010738998005887,0.0,0.13570418369460102,0.0,0.07887704168285263,0.0,0.0,0.1047799845268696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524374808844952,0.0,0.0,0.08623179943811646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855215633926553,0.07794165138423823,0.0993907745119364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06569854689413812,0.09164693948430394,0.09196612192003753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CornflowerCat,2020/01/12,"Guilt and feeling crazy: Tips? I have a lot of anxiety surrounding trauma from sexual abuse. When it comes up (it's semi-rare at this point!) I can't help but feel demanding of my partner when asking to make changes (as to avoid triggers). It makes me feel guilty. I also just feel crazy sometimes; I know that anxiety is irrational but it still happens! It's just easy to get bogged down. My partner is very supportive and understanding, but it's still difficult to not feel guilty. Any tips? Things to tell myself/do? Conversations to have? 

(I am in therapy and generally am doing well, but would love some thoughts!)",2.9389030100334463,5.754437713043482,3.661739130434782,84.56571906354516,80.56521739130434,7.7123745819398,25.36789297658863,8.617729084823388,2.1785117056856187,487,19,91,12,13,154,78,115,0.265,0.614,0.121,-0.9416,0,1,0,0,1,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,8,7,0,2,1,0,9,1,0,3,0,27,25,11,0,1,7,0,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,9,4,0,1,8,0,0,1,2,4,1,0,1,5,8,3,14,23,2,11,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,2,4,59,17,0,0.0,0.2126974020262241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355908059873182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207720615612586,0.0,0.27465888041842434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782346122468733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18990438993277745,0.15463735427664044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4538440503459114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378983158137623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15874562737967934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032595861242648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865743647206493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526182965402148,0.1620204247810966,0.0,0.23965698223590096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16970088142131776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754616187819586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28672381894261045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20371291360612265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15690511536096186,0.0,0.20529247734489495,0.0,0.11926262005610777,0.0,0.0,0.14251585066905034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18688274766169494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811970705428515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16140666815726593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752319372134202,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,quartzm,2020/01/12,"How do you hospitalize yourself? I’m not going into detail but I’ve been suffering from mental illness for years and lately I believe my schizophrenia has worsened and that I have developed bipolar disorder(having weird instances of god and delusions). 

I don’t know how to commit myself into hospitalization without losing my job and not being able to support my partner. My job is a small family business so I’m not in a union. Other coworkers have been fired lately for taking time off work so much and arguing about scheduling(place has only been open a month). This job has been great for me and I don’t know how to take care of myself without possibly losing my employment. 

TLDR; want to hospitalize myself but don’t want to lose my job",5.49376907763769,7.6605844817518305,6.2351559389515625,72.54254147312545,69.14598540145985,8.485467816854678,29.972793629727946,9.095868883498916,2.9307576642335764,602,24,94,12,11,197,82,137,0.163,0.667,0.16899999999999998,-0.2602,5,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,4,6,9,1,0,3,0,15,2,0,3,1,24,26,13,0,2,7,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,3,9,0,0,2,0,0,1,8,6,0,0,4,1,15,3,18,21,1,12,0,4,0,0,3,6,0,0,5,71,18,6,0.13730994789312242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547012907162393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13999664310535065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294435986012194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803640769665242,0.0,0.0,0.15138470229886672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5450357440455614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509239127933927,0.0,0.3097832040475902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4608441275039245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13837613183185596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959949039497424,0.0,0.10093861078654097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443040279594296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15479633505071375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558177016726152,0.0,0.0,0.2064799847635368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006653483383032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16197792969088287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647237797041057,0.0,0.09996327741977973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842310455969199
mentalhealth,risingstrong98,2020/01/12,"When PTSD/Body Dysmorphia/Depression/Anxiety all mix together My life feels like a rollercoaster and I don't know what to expect from one hour to the next. I've gotten great at compartmentalizing things, so I can be successful at work for a short period of time, then feel suicidal, then go to the gym, then go to sleep, then talk myself into being OK, then meet up with friends, then go on a date, then feel suicidal again.

I have an appointment scheduled with a psychiatrist but it can't come soon enough.

This isn't out of the blue. It was sparked from a very specific, prolonged trauma. But I just don't even know what to do anymore. This is not my normal. I am scared and alone. I used to be so happy; I didn't ask for this or deserve this.",3.3538963963963973,5.0415302905405435,4.368648648648648,85.70855855855856,73.79729729729729,8.446846846846848,24.495495495495497,9.075114841892004,1.7465927927927924,585,18,123,13,12,190,97,148,0.107,0.7759999999999999,0.11699999999999999,0.1317,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,7,8,0,1,9,1,14,2,1,1,1,21,26,15,2,2,5,0,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,9,7,0,0,5,1,0,4,6,2,0,1,3,4,10,6,20,20,2,27,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,1,17,85,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18121392161931751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13384992380250818,0.0,0.17352108864413004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16357131772310785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19434983398447025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071930720330232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18078855747452335,0.0,0.11556461257139188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654070014316434,0.12499706462876126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351797243188265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983147782123715,0.0,0.0,0.1929026686559859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186256526305256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723080843915053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19231550546218365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358496452438553,0.08548045192076953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860802899116296,0.0,0.17143134055549838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856274111415413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20452804961666213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17517333791479925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750942063668349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3827728516755665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14063252749753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624086272163135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202515845353648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511160420840226,0.0,0.14436679762666044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737867624038338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AstroCentauri0,2020/01/12,"Please listen to my story Before I say anything, I want to clarify that I’m not looking for any advice specifically. I just want to know what you thing about it, if you’ve been there and got out, or if you want to convince me I’m wrong just do it. I don’t have an order for the things I’ll say so I’ll just say them as they come through my mind.

Wow, it’s been 4 years since my 18. I’m turning 22 in three weeks. My life was so different back then, and so many things change. I never tried to suicide, never ever thought about self harming, but there’s this think I disaggre with. “Suicide it’s just a permanent solution to a temporary problem”. See, mine’s not temporary. Mine’s it’s time itself. I don’t want to grow old, I just don’t. At 22 I should be having fun and thing about all the great things I can do. But I just can’t. All I know it’s that in a matter of years, that I feel like they’re passin by like minutes, my grandparents won’t be there anymore. I still have all 4 of them, and you know, they are doing great but they still gettin old. A lot of years after this day, I’ll have to watch my beloved parents get old, start to having problems, maybe lose their mental sanity due to old age, and in the worst case, have to put someone to help her and even having to think about maybe take them to an hospice. Man, I just can’t.
While you are reading this, think about that happy day you had 5 years ago. What does it mean in the end? I can’t relive it, there’s no single way you csn get to feel those things again. So why havibg to face a life full of nostalgia, thinking back bout the “good ol’ days”,  then watch problems and pain rise higher and higher until you die. Just Why? What cn you find to just deal with? You know, what actually makes me feel like I’ll never be calm and happy again, is that I know my vision of life is the true one. You can’t say it’s not like that. No professional help or explanation about the human psychic can tell me that life is not an excalation of problems that become bigger as years passing by. And in fact, sometimes I’m happy, or angry, or sad or maybe worried, sometimes enthusiast about something. It’s not like I’m all moody and depressed 24/7, I go out with friends and make music, talk with everyone and generally not being moody. I do feel things, kinda. But there’s ALWAYS this feelings that reminds me that days are passing. You can’t stop it, cry, be depressed, do what you want, they are passing. And they are fast. This gives me a LOT of anxiety. Constant anxiey. I don’t even feel rested again from sleep. And what I don’t experience anymore: you know that feeling when you wake up the next morning thinking “uo, that’s another day, yesterday was lit I dis this and that and today I’ll do this and that, first let me get a breakfast and chill 20 minutes on the couch”. Well, I don’t have it anymore, from like more than a year and going on. It seems the same day to me. Really, I can perfectly rewire it back to the exact same moment as when I fell asleep the night before. Like you save a game, you close it, tweak the internal watch 8 hours beyond and just resume the game. Not to mention that the day passes by fast. Like, very fast. If I don’t get enough sleep, I just can’t get up from bed and fall asleep again. If I sleep as I want, I get up lowkey panicking because it’s already 2 p.m and fuck day’s already over?
You know what, I’ve always been a strong believer of god. Not following any religion, but in my own personal way. And I do still believe in it. But I feel like he doesn’t want me anymore. There’s been a day in wich I really had this feeling that he left me. And I can’t figure out why. I’m the same person that I never get angry or upset, but if I do, it’s the end, I lose control. And I’m the same person that will get crazy emotionally or almost cry when my mom said to me “this is the peluche I had when I was young” (peluche = that stuffed animals you have as a kid to play with) or when I think back at when I played with them as a little kid. Damn, i really played a lot with them”.
Final thing: Hair is what I always cared a lot for. 22 yrs old and I’m losing hair day by day. I can’t hide it anymore. I’m undergoind a hair transplant in I hope few months. 3k and little more, I work in a restaurant as a barista and that’s like 3 of my salaries.
That’s it, I just wanted to write it down",1.7835252750889408,3.37899934640523,3.1713104988830985,93.02279597915116,77.86710239651416,6.173155732053722,21.315242271310773,6.931566637808354,0.3095947822729652,3392,89,773,35,79,1107,334,918,0.122,0.7190000000000001,0.159,0.9815,3,0,1,0,0,2,120.0,0,18,11,8,51,50,2,1,40,0,65,17,10,3,13,154,133,70,3,19,40,2,12,10,1,3,5,6,2,8,69,41,1,2,27,6,0,13,31,19,1,3,13,24,99,31,90,111,21,117,0,6,6,1,59,29,2,21,82,496,168,3,0.0,0.0,0.04304957137105184,0.0,0.0,0.04310836205200993,0.03910500873284937,0.0,0.044174487168842314,0.0,0.09736330925505476,0.0,0.11012086183936354,0.0,0.0,0.059999000501960636,0.046258096264785414,0.03374761518341411,0.0,0.21874958010470888,0.0,0.0,0.03630262899012603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568588657375175,0.0,0.026891904036794787,0.04872120641884989,0.07507669970917571,0.09940429224712874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0449778639868854,0.0,0.046667489966674185,0.038000897092124515,0.0,0.04767230514793439,0.04947837316918482,0.0,0.0,0.09691582548547313,0.31295356306128996,0.04548030573380522,0.0759918313882464,0.0,0.04578408080473578,0.0460904590954984,0.0,0.0,0.0386050603070169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04962308575278107,0.07814503836815369,0.045582264777504725,0.0,0.05827467006457261,0.03990426044914231,0.0,0.042153474391061325,0.0,0.04315262931106237,0.0,0.0,0.20075140344154085,0.0945466246743294,0.0,0.04832548383751368,0.0403200251618353,0.03752393064385564,0.0,0.0,0.03408289812434153,0.0407833177308361,0.1843848275797854,0.042318828015257715,0.05014278704902776,0.03700130686028867,0.03528254553995834,0.09727319739473562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14088271543038652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05913829025504445,0.0,0.0,0.043815838557450006,0.043444080951555976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16970994982419074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047930737036817286,0.04511025682108046,0.12463803360481833,0.2155220798917186,0.0884290124204614,0.0,0.0,0.03704522692449607,0.14805915360719227,0.0,0.15001891899481726,0.0,0.0,0.0588937929128248,0.044725369041892345,0.13295739900518466,0.04805382734150398,0.0,0.0,0.04445722910570751,0.0,0.044543258682140666,0.0516665888175965,0.03521192267665665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360958663091444,0.0,0.04691647061690845,0.04139864579942712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314547181631498,0.0,0.02989325394099512,0.0,0.04694113780716679,0.0,0.04898413983748117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555773060299553,0.0,0.04842467947310598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688471924408639,0.0,0.04434744548691035,0.0,0.0,0.044126625551959744,0.0,0.08478299528362293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04196316996573825,0.14032708050702694,0.0,0.0,0.0351536943824925,0.04016035466002643,0.04602124010897126,0.0,0.0,0.036492125361166486,0.0,0.13243963977219342,0.0,0.037378231553562014,0.03396164167921095,0.08726110787649696,0.0,0.031224602863188206,0.0,0.1056901392467596,0.03688185406743138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650861602330628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033168754852642535,0.03545771477061245,0.0385581813007036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23446270523131502,0.1696014628273845,0.0,0.035022134209452584,0.025723629036927983,0.0,0.04181556554646173,0.0,0.0,0.029950977042257108,0.04798411213881404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036399237243906916,0.20815988523471585,0.07003237112136376,0.03538614134835999,0.0,0.039664402015402916,0.0,0.11941993157980732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03211601789684844,0.04480060652501138,0.0,0.0,0.04823248553175938,0.0,0.1704504743242077
mentalhealth,CryptoDann,2020/01/12,"This course really gave me hope! Hey everyone, thanks for hearing me out. Lately I have been kind of depressed about toxic people in my life. However this course really got all of the toxicity out of my life. Now I'm starting to feel better now. I wanted to share this with you all because it helped me so much. Tell me what you think! The course is called [Life Detox](https://www.lifedetox.com/). If you do decide to check out the course please come back and tell me if its helped you as much as its helped me! Thanks for listening everyone. :)",3.7191089108910913,6.361007693069311,3.4202871287128715,88.53003465346536,76.02970297029705,7.2083168316831685,20.000990099009897,8.238735603445708,0.9433239603960386,431,10,83,8,10,129,62,101,0.031,0.792,0.17600000000000002,0.9398,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,4,0,1,5,7,0,0,3,0,4,3,0,0,2,15,17,6,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,7,6,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,3,3,14,6,16,14,4,10,0,1,0,0,15,4,0,3,5,55,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296764705237231,0.0,0.10280353511221596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491515041671564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17220390717312606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452714747591206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452524316551576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3222922541099382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527123968566583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348796427468504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19007352329966967,0.0,0.3391146248175165,0.0,0.0,0.16750108476695552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756162926454473,0.0,0.0,0.19023725579356124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3573537535631213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479448087404504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691619463822606,0.0,0.0,0.18511996137201006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21607473685842732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936676378209192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.294803769921717,0.3105286225460182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805996924453516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947032776761566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coliet27,2020/01/12,"My Depression Is Stopping Me From Enjoying My Free Time This is the first free night I've had in a while just to relax. But I don't have any motivation to do anything. Like not even stuff I like. I don't want to watch tv, or listen to music, or a podcast, or read, or color. Every one of my hobbies and ways of distracting myself is so unappealing to me. I just want to lay down and do nothing. Does this happen to anyone else? How can I stop it? I just want to have a good night,",0.7091176470588252,2.569707950980394,3.0801568627450986,91.14670588235296,82.23529411764707,6.04078431372549,20.003921568627447,7.1686216300943375,0.3575968627450976,369,10,84,5,10,127,64,102,0.158,0.675,0.168,0.7309,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,6,9,0,1,4,0,11,0,0,2,0,18,16,10,0,3,9,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,2,1,3,2,0,3,2,0,2,1,3,12,9,13,15,0,10,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,4,9,61,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14086831863618926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448432894910851,0.2122484723239012,0.17046584993512762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17841699741976952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812773509825534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17304627997486213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13681985903759775,0.0,0.17453183691183347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762007024849752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17374662381518274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18318104029365764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20240492521090409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3887903184247121,0.0,0.1987649044588025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140369419023739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072049033013524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34637142133689897,0.0,0.0,0.2371358686074348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207901578805363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665452690277522,0.16442511187581782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BedlamAndBoomsticks,2020/01/12,"Selfcarecharts: A New Subreddit For Recovery/Self-care Visual Aids It's sort of a mix between [r/depression](https://www.reddit.com/r/depression) and [r/motivation](https://www.reddit.com/r/motivation) and [r/coolguides](https://www.reddit.com/r/coolguides). It's for resources, charts and worksheets for use in recovery work. Mostly a place to put things I find online (Pinterest mostly) but to give them a platform for discussion by workers in the field and people working on their own self-care alike. The subreddit is [/r/selfcarecharts](https://www.reddit.com/r/selfcarecharts) if you want to check it out.",11.583904761904762,15.086455422222222,7.910952380952383,61.24500000000001,55.88888888888889,10.476190476190476,36.19047619047619,10.608840637214634,4.555714285714286,508,21,64,12,7,141,62,90,0.0,0.9790000000000001,0.021,0.1154,0,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,1,0,0,1,0,13,4,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,14,4,3,8,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,4,1,38,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300157053880128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440851565079246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561853004276733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25792520553097764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185143619797286,0.0,0.27901760667787107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26846593296883875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.557197152015652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17742072912886778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306514055545345,0.0,0.0,0.15751707111495053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3888411886301878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mythrowaway7XD,2020/01/12,"My crazy vent about the wrong things in my life Im 18 and a senior in high school. I hate school. I am basically socially enept. During school i just sit alone and dont talk to anyone all day. I usually just sit there staring at the wall or floor and half ass all the school work so ill atleast pass my classes. Every social interaction i have is awkward so i try to avoid them but even when i avoid them its still awkward. I hate it but its my only option as i cant learn shit like that. Im 100% going to college i think its a deathtrap for me, plus theres nothing i want to major in and no classes interest my because school stuff basically makes me numb.
I have a few friends that I regularly but i dont think they really like me. I am always awkward around them and act either too wierd or too uninterested. Its like im unable to enjoy myself half the time.

Im an only child with 2 boomer parents. My mom had ADHD and my dad has lots of back problems so its not too fun. At home i will browse reddit, 4chan and youtube and play a some video games(im not really good at any games i just play for fun). I also randomly talk to myself and often be in a bad mood and dont know why. 
My only real hobby is listening to music and finding underground bands.

For my meds I have been taking lexapro for like almost 3 months but that shit hasnt i dont think has done anything i feel basically the same. 

**Here comes the kind of NSFW-ish/weird/cringe part of my vent 😭
I have a secert hobby where i like crossdressing. Female clothes are just so pretty to me, male clothes are boring.
And finally, one of the biggest things i hate myself for. Having an asian fetisn. I feel so guilty for ONLY liking asian women idk what to do. I wish i could be asian(im white) then it wouldnt be weird but i cant so i just dont know what to do. Not like this even matters though because I've never talked to a girl my age.

Sorry to whoever reads this.",0.8509827703468602,3.0791332543640952,2.618682271593745,92.5203199387894,84.28678304239398,5.341215143958286,19.08869870777601,6.680037744263671,0.08817655860349173,1509,40,328,17,44,498,207,401,0.192,0.7090000000000001,0.099,-0.9843,1,3,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,4,1,28,33,5,5,16,0,32,6,3,1,3,61,49,31,0,5,16,3,2,7,1,2,3,1,1,4,17,16,0,2,9,6,0,4,14,16,0,3,3,5,51,16,34,40,9,31,0,0,2,1,21,13,3,8,19,212,68,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458094960575498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047362598866938,0.07289061589451047,0.0,0.05628144091763936,0.058560320886539924,0.0,0.0,0.04785960621237896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0492100911309384,0.0,0.05791528236823708,0.06265154109100098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05411651065574891,0.058762877978384725,0.08580382517938945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062460892116976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056191285746603814,0.0,0.0,0.04538813272817408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202135873235416,0.4124137763747167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296830740890807,0.0,0.0592966897524792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117069014049175,0.0,0.0,0.07709590516963727,0.06432442242618991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054374041872724564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03999756700079068,0.0590299158606465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20845177951975966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743584584969191,0.07059509772902002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4561233582613975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328809099976119,0.07735606356254877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04971022148291398,0.2406827197512207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059833049946091274,0.0,0.0,0.046978011526526725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817434207888012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242612625076201,0.05617522756001424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05428002561872156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752980477326123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04769010650355485,0.21410324519228066,0.0,0.0,0.0781466899001874,0.0762127591125867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159995601455145,0.0,0.06734245631326348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039727011215398,0.08010582753684088,0.09017218584383097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35613260388152324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14448447271806816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14348347441822346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878266067431977,0.0,0.0,0.05620414120860917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056622951320322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052915666345159575,0.16970205355906662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351233062201704,0.13528657404379266,0.06914624850187398,0.0,0.04103810882717821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04778219486744903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751167161797473,0.0,0.04151090040334066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635054012178314,0.0,0.08093148520847768,0.0,0.0,0.051236185829550716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694754062174207,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,underthesea30,2020/01/12,"Am I Bipolar? I (26) recently watched a series on Netflix where one of the characters has Bipolar Disorder. I knew in my head that it was quite triggering but I still watched it. 
It was scary, it’s like watching my life on screen. I have been having trouble connecting with people, I have thoughts of killing myself (that I have to fight every single day), and I have had a few episodes before where I just cry for no reason, shout at someone randomly, and just feel so depressed even if there’s a lot of reasons to be happy. My mood swings are just really bad that my ex fiancé couldn’t take it and had to leave. I always thought it was just a premenstrual thing but I tracked my symptoms and it just comes out randomly. I haven’t been to any specialist to check as I was scared of being labeled as someone with Mental Health problems. Please help me.",4.0499768303985215,5.720310957831327,4.4598795180722925,85.83085727525491,71.95180722891567,7.517330861909176,29.636700648748842,8.139509932561175,2.03284670991659,673,28,131,10,13,212,105,166,0.242,0.68,0.078,-0.9862,0,0,0,0,1,1,18.0,0,0,0,1,11,10,2,1,5,0,20,6,1,3,0,28,26,10,1,3,8,1,1,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,11,8,0,0,6,1,1,1,3,7,0,1,11,6,20,2,19,12,3,11,0,1,4,0,3,7,0,4,4,98,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885421537513135,0.0,0.0,0.11348141485867624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933450485495288,0.0,0.0,0.1419992005639964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437489135430623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833054701957685,0.10762122648753313,0.0,0.14373007002605592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912543744188279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022003623433936,0.0,0.14060024271170926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437752890998958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17764262451505433,0.0,0.0,0.1712629384964378,0.17738140396625254,0.0,0.0,0.1118534774632822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18462358949715307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17669760837262527,0.0,0.0,0.11786946682733344,0.0815271933024873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418720232059923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817177677641976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130795087775828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569081943101175,0.0,0.0,0.18317975615298426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15967781240354398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749318662492486,0.0,0.0,0.10690505042027162,0.3431526799243432,0.1647699359870376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707200606354958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827870175253885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332674037677328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734480786879559,0.12546999777622825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086501149453697,0.0,0.0,0.2649618365778778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,benett_knicks,2020/01/12,"16 years old with 10 concussions So I am currently 16 and have 5 reported concussions—one major one where I blacked out for about 30 seconds and was out for 3 months, one pretty serious one where I did not lose consciousness but was out for 2 months, and the rest minor concussions. After getting those concussions, any minor head injury, such as a basketball hitting my head, has given me minor headaches for one or two weeks along with the occasional lightheadedness, although I have been able to play sports through them and do all my normal activities while I was recovering. This has happened around 5 times. I guess technically they are considered concussions, meaning I have probably had around 10 concussions. However, after each one I have recovered fine and although I’m definitely a little more anxious irritable for a while even after the headaches go away, I have pretty much fully recovered and went back to normal each time. I want to keep playing basketball but don’t know if I can and am wondering how badly this will affect me later in life.",11.689578947368426,9.474638457894738,10.689342105263162,60.72664473684214,56.526315789473685,14.76315789473684,43.75,13.22790407523584,5.860999999999999,857,38,138,25,8,274,118,190,0.08199999999999999,0.812,0.107,0.4282,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,1,10,6,0,0,6,0,20,3,2,2,1,34,33,18,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,17,0,1,4,3,0,2,2,3,0,7,8,1,17,3,24,23,7,27,0,1,1,0,2,10,0,4,15,106,20,1,0.14013555884760084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529698546944182,0.0,0.0,0.1583132934968205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495007156763015,0.0,0.0,0.1316619705178311,0.10775559470198684,0.11700733817154314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092558214968908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321504561597719,0.0,0.07964226751831249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15437511709323404,0.0,0.1239214118841432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876390249746896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455892354373894,0.0,0.0,0.07701483828116729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09898188951489316,0.0,0.14045264489755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15677584506274553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526487057318472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22370973220187584,0.0,0.10301575995704597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746061881484969,0.0,0.0,0.1470486956722332,0.0,0.4747974070595153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851364859816393,0.1510898341780632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634283426086961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13689207850100313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265558339544825,0.0,0.11240829246094124,0.0,0.0,0.12990706700981233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15197103578750285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024270537308192
mentalhealth,Sash-love-processors,2020/01/12,"I need help. I am from the UK in buckinghamshire. Services here are unable to help me. No one understands what is happening to me. I can't think of any other way to describe what I need to say. Please don't hate me for just typing that as the title. I have something affecting me severely for many years now. I don't know how to accurately describe it. I don't even care about my anxiety anymore, and I am going to post this here because I am absolutely done with living in silence with my ""issue"" and I need someone to tell me what the hell is going on.

I will try to be descriptive as possible. I am literally shaking as I type this. Butterflies in my stomach,  I feel physically sick. My problem is with my emotions. Anger. Rage. Hatred. Sadness. Dysphoria. They are extreme and they come in phases and are often triggered by events, most often online and almost always related to current events and/or news.

Something happened just now, on reddit, that has made me feel no other option than suicide is the way to escape this, I can't describe it any other way but torture in my own head. I hav never felt so much like I want to take my own life than now. I'm not depressed, I'm not upset right now. I am just so out of control in my own head that I don't see any escape other than to end my life and never have to experience this ever again/

I can't live with the world. I can't live with things that upset me. I can't live with being angry and upset all of the time. The emotions are absolutely extreme. My coping mechanisms are very bad and I won't describe them because I am ashamed of some of them.

I don't even know what I'm trying to describe. Extreme emotions. I will read something that upsets me on the news and I will cry and rage and shout and scream and feel the need to hit my head on the wall because there is nothing i can do about it. nothing. I make up stories in my own scifi universe where I control everything and I can make these things not happen. Living in my scifie role play universe is my only escape. There I control everything.

I have autistic spectrum disorder, ADHD, i suffer with depression and I have an anxiety disorder that really hurts my life. But this problem is pure emotions. The anger and hatred that can come over me is terrifying, one day I will do something I will absolutely regret, to myself or maybe someone else.

I hide this thing so well. Take a look at my comments on Reddt and you will see that I try to take a lot of though when I type about things. I am losing that control, with what happened on a subreddit that harbours views i passionately disagree with, my view on humanity has turned into bitter resentment.

My medication was increased lately and my mood has been lifted. But it seems to make the emotion extreme worse. What can I do? I have little to no self control. I am at the entire mercy of these impulsive emotions.

One news story can ruin my entire day and effect my entire week. Tears. Rage. My own views on subjects are becoming twisted in a mess of coping mechanisms that make me do and say things I am appalled of.

I've just typed this and I don't even know how to explain it. I'll delete my reddit account most likely, for the 3rd time, along with Twitter that I used to follow the tech companies. I couldn't sustain a twitter account for more than a week and I closed 2-3 accounts, each time getting progressively shorter due to the ""Trending"" feeds upsetting and angering me.

My only solution is isolation. I can't talk to anyone. I can't cope with disagreements. I Can't cope with human beings.

I'm done. I am so anxious it will take me an hour to build the confidence to check for replies. I wont even read what I put now because I will 100% delete it and the cycle will repeat.

I am going to do something terrible it is simply a matter of time now.

I just want to feel calm and not care about anything. I was told that some illegal drugs can give this effect and I am so depserate for relief and just to ""Not Care"" that that is on the table

I started crying. Yep.

I'm done. how much bravery will it take to press post? I can't live like this anymore. x\_x",2.433300246989809,4.660172196341462,3.8988329731398608,85.59736184007411,78.25609756097559,6.3470206853967275,25.257795615930853,7.440691896683207,1.363676597715345,3251,122,624,45,79,1073,313,820,0.20800000000000002,0.705,0.087,-0.9989,1,1,6,0,0,3,93.0,0,1,4,9,40,44,11,7,28,1,85,12,4,18,5,119,142,44,1,10,15,0,6,3,0,12,6,4,0,3,51,46,1,5,14,3,4,9,28,32,1,3,9,17,105,11,95,116,16,73,1,8,6,1,19,30,1,11,32,459,156,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300761089625136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05249852153988939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0436238411790978,0.0,0.0,0.10695739856078212,0.0,0.08021371683861908,0.05922809956193635,0.1039878923694116,0.03665849447895378,0.0,0.04314332711341562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04377473376763839,0.12783715613297147,0.0579020033634591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16035984881783974,0.0,0.0,0.09032321787464463,0.0,0.0,0.2940092354273288,0.0,0.0,0.11517819170957935,0.06762274057158657,0.0,0.09031137773582104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017280760133005,0.0,0.0,0.16095446202883762,0.0,0.0,0.06079920143308446,0.0,0.043796410046683,0.35384297180101426,0.04643516249917695,0.0,0.0,0.1385113542992191,0.04742363320971986,0.0,0.0,0.0942368293095108,0.05128410955243787,0.0,0.0,0.10603558301229242,0.0,0.05033857707264308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02739118058498289,0.050293190628569455,0.0893871900278744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18544569590619156,0.0,0.0,0.05176125623177972,0.1614170778031476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028203390160709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051630480980991364,0.0,0.0561246732910237,0.0,0.0,0.05472064036312405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643827202461074,0.0,0.0591404511154298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109318259115902,0.07684021668618961,0.05254608158282332,0.2777664116808591,0.0,0.04402585673971313,0.05865291003164865,0.0,0.04457194613339717,0.0,0.04960812413467268,0.1399829292406813,0.05315320902426726,0.05267042375902306,0.0,0.0,0.052815143742945284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708042138996991,0.15549716982681208,0.08087056836236464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061111119906256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065785979531844,0.07974688170078216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057549600262800725,0.0,0.05910407643990951,0.10042201631271576,0.0,0.0,0.10033198501463046,0.0,0.05270407131688833,0.0,0.0,0.10488328220621214,0.0,0.03358636918712242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044772758821397335,0.0,0.08338483059769514,0.0,0.0,0.08355578525188513,0.04772798461950428,0.05469326799242087,0.05922809956193635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884322241647769,0.2018060753497127,0.0,0.0,0.03710842142257603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05734712479761471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19709460173552024,0.04213920119831549,0.045823905183481464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741523525479774,0.03359339526836036,0.05150970686483214,0.0,0.12228347896084288,0.0,0.0,0.050096678538493734,0.0,0.10678439847306608,0.0570260144744543,0.0,0.054578828036148636,0.0,0.04528048677631555,0.0,0.043258139776042835,0.061846140833320004,0.12484341684891136,0.08410828162825883,0.0,0.047138576971215915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05342805410858159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03376156114573367
mentalhealth,Swizzle_Kadizzle,2020/01/12,"So tired of this I’m tired of feeling lonely and worthless. It’s really grating on me, I have so many other things going on and I’m just so tired I want a break I want to be happy again.",-1.6692857142857136,0.27192730952381083,1.4685714285714295,97.00142857142859,97.33333333333331,3.752380952380953,14.142857142857142,5.46131890053228,-0.9646,145,3,34,1,6,51,29,42,0.33299999999999996,0.5,0.16699999999999998,-0.8525,0,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,8,5,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,5,7,0,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309691928336715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835968899298862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25915975608318914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468226644315676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559619312460154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617390500479196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8394386451235589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871892317606019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dawsoncase,2020/01/12,Why can’t anything go right for me Recently my mental health has been so much better this past month. I finally just said that I don’t need my family anymore cause they just hurt me and I met a girl who I started talking to.  Well I thought everything was going good we talked for like 2 weeks and then I asked her to go to the movies with me and my friends. So my friends canceled and I told her and I was like I’m sorry. So the next day I ask her if she just wanted me and her to go to the movies. She was down that we could go this Saturday or Monday night. Well Friday night ( last night ) we talked for like 5 hours straight and I really thought something good could be going on in my life. Well today she seemed very distant and left me on delivered and would just snap back with “yepp” and then maybe 2 hours ago she messaged me “ hey I’m still getting over someone else and I don’t want to lead you on before it gets to serious” I reply with ok I understand it’s hard to get over someone so I understand. Then she starts snapping just pics of her for like a few minutes and then she’s left me on delivered for an hour. I go look on Instagram and she posted a new picture 3 minutes ago and it said “vibes don’t lie”. And it’s a pic of her smiling. So I’ve been really in the dumps about it cause it seems like nothing can ever go my way. I was going to ask her to prom after a few dates in “I had already bought 2 tickets before the price started going up”. So yeah I feel myself about to relapse back to my old habits of just wanting to die every second every day of my life.,0.7148417450812694,2.7872847185628764,2.3694388366124914,95.07175449101798,83.55089820359281,5.374029084687767,20.62070145423439,6.610729790773281,0.1887693071000851,1232,37,278,13,35,403,162,334,0.043,0.821,0.136,0.9790000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,3,1,1,2,21,17,1,0,11,2,17,3,0,3,1,47,55,27,1,8,8,0,2,5,2,1,3,2,0,1,11,21,0,0,7,1,2,11,4,3,3,1,14,5,53,14,40,37,3,64,0,1,1,0,35,16,0,4,40,176,64,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365098022159606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084970228368304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636224330985439,0.0,0.0,0.06336355449012593,0.0,0.21595080217775012,0.0,0.0,0.11841484083419156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310408277663601,0.0,0.0,0.06809929185612369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581982124820965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295475220640098,0.0,0.0,0.09931587324536666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991272752285407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643227214991949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964993587778799,0.12974983039281265,0.0,0.06920166881465567,0.0,0.0725877337024258,0.0,0.03893297000732718,0.0,0.0,0.08434855859152385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897835680553713,0.0,0.12068628079954564,0.0,0.4376026348301147,0.12916609009697133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897591261398965,0.0,0.0,0.08184625657670909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274852924340069,0.0,0.08242894167544303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276440073383026,0.0,0.0,0.1673191144812306,0.0,0.10877323562446538,0.18808892679313324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06465970427287332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735576945884423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775968059967695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06145980727267125,0.0,0.05660306943905698,0.057093727191462836,0.0,0.07436604151549317,0.08188923020499267,0.21677482501139786,0.0,0.07388254515020423,0.0,0.08079741910877275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07350418646298884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374368562155288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865496597048302,0.0,0.07602714915645124,0.0,0.0,0.0657566611818102,0.14648722038426895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14019385877179874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304818784575,0.05927753424414853,0.0,0.08619399247291137,0.16350070614656875,0.0,0.061491440918806387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185666457592435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222570910742984,0.0,0.0,0.07298597759295399,0.07357577249440052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031719274614498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353217705336525,0.1362478827048149,0.06111816261059513,0.06176389308146143,0.0,0.2076938421543656,0.0,0.06947955333962495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054697827068653435,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hardy326,2020/01/12,I got put on workmen’s compensation after taking a fall at work and will be out for 3 weeks. I’m scared that I’m going to lose my mind being off work that long. What can I do to distract myself while I’m out? The title says most of it. What can I do to try and stave off negative thoughts and anxiety when I can’t keep myself occupied?,2.8389041095890413,3.3562427534246595,4.813589041095892,86.55572602739728,73.5205479452055,8.031780821917808,24.189041095890413,8.238735603445708,1.1824213698630142,263,7,60,4,5,91,53,73,0.192,0.8079999999999999,0.0,-0.9111,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,2,2,0,8,0,0,0,0,9,16,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,5,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,2,1,7,0,12,11,1,14,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,1,5,41,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167426289577416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610199628804555,0.0,0.2266006541525987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25183202174436675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25073345414701903,0.0,0.3169678807393431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860771920220531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848195900703842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22531118256621,0.2836574628086934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21302492300403492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22492817341351695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19235888132273746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22726599384371296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41252752899931583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ShadowPh0enix777,2020/01/12,"Depression ugh So I have chronic depression. Well I’ve been trying new meds and nothing works... I feel hopeless and just want to sleep all day. Nothing brings me joy like it used to. I don’t really want to do anything. 

When my fellow depression fighters had these episodes where just nothing helped... what did you do?",2.3747881355932208,5.301301288135598,2.4862500000000023,90.37310381355934,86.96610169491525,5.661864406779661,26.019067796610173,7.1686216300943375,1.5386084745762711,252,11,46,4,8,76,45,59,0.262,0.602,0.136,-0.9005,0,0,0,0,1,1,11.0,0,1,0,1,6,8,0,0,0,0,7,2,1,1,1,9,12,4,0,2,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,1,0,3,1,6,3,3,9,1,5,0,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,28,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16620368333477642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13025361408317127,0.0,0.5218680835835788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212184386512774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537589342610554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867209211685037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22434257530113424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19506339431806868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5813855253350132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129386828560229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20211535235879236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13712402771855495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17443679449272476,0.0,0.0,0.23825367894129754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18159482923466388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470361959172059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TARDIS1-13,2020/01/12,"Bad days at work I've been struggling more recently with my mental health, most days I feel like I'm just killing time until I can go home & go to bed. I have talked to my primary care physician and gotten put on new anti depression meds. But my question is what are some tips to manage while at work? I'm a tax preparer and right now I need to be in my game, but I feel just not involved, I want to care but I don't.",3.026520146520145,3.3124679340659355,4.329395604395607,91.03643772893773,72.95604395604396,7.8249084249084255,25.05677655677656,7.793537801064563,0.991306227106227,326,9,78,4,6,108,64,91,0.135,0.774,0.092,-0.2266,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,3,7,1,1,1,0,7,2,0,0,0,16,18,7,1,2,6,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,3,0,0,3,1,1,3,2,4,0,0,2,2,11,3,11,15,3,16,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,3,9,44,12,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20810773859843187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16037040707493355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3916562823644738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247738489754224,0.0,0.16542958876541294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942327017038378,0.13721482913185246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21831558707125287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20416140274230116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19266184621628124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21249697075477414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383568837602198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133464441039912,0.0,0.193561360326538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424174533904382,0.0,0.18550237954946144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930833758227035,0.21516233024228307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18964592966731075,0.0,0.0,0.16402670993200835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20079324163171888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15437857111497325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199754750985563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328784812376805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.279658459937052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alwaysaskin4,2020/01/12,"What is a ‘stress reaction’? Hi, 19F here! Earlier in 2019, around March time I experienced a series of what I believed to be ‘mild psychotic symptoms’. During that time, I had experienced extreme intrusive recurrent thoughts (literally non stop as if I had to shoot myself), someone ‘talking to me’ (I was being commanded not to eat which led to me physically being unable to pick up food and pacing around the shop), I would have recurrent dreams of waking up in the middle of the road (my bedroom window was across the road), I would feel euphoric for 2/3 days and depressed for latter end of the week. This lasted for about a month. 

I went to the GP who then sent me to a mental health nurse (not a psychiatrist) only in December 2019, who said I had a stress reaction not psychosis. It literally felt as if I was slowly losing my mind, during that month and hasn’t happened since. I’m going back to uni and scared its going to happen again. I’ve been stressed before, my childhood has been full of stressors (bullying, abuse at home) and never once have I felt as if someone was controlling/talking to me, or felt as if I need to shoot myself in the head. I’ve only had it once for a week in 2018 but it slowly died down. 

So what is psychosis and what is a stress reaction? I’m ultimately convinced that I at least have GAD, and I’m not self diagnosing as such, but I just have an innate anxious, fear, paranoid state that I’ve had my whole life, and I feel that ‘explains’ it.",7.124367015098724,6.356612052264812,7.495693379790943,75.40072938443673,64.36585365853661,10.440789779326368,33.419047619047625,9.725611199111238,2.9959748664343784,1157,41,222,20,15,380,149,287,0.132,0.8390000000000001,0.027999999999999997,-0.9769,2,0,0,2,1,0,40.0,0,0,0,1,9,9,0,6,16,0,25,8,2,2,1,37,43,22,1,7,12,0,5,0,0,2,4,1,3,1,18,10,2,1,7,2,1,5,6,8,0,0,18,8,25,1,40,20,3,39,0,2,0,0,8,17,0,5,16,154,43,0,0.0,0.12574798333919712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989791922845172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18895833694596773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816082547752193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030973806135388,0.11957339134228474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844577107003129,0.0,0.09141054966533572,0.10772081920146784,0.11014731230521066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085985975937117,0.0,0.0,0.09400064165260427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942697900513816,0.10732613287764572,0.0,0.3057074611157909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12833413160244714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063348499882168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877027393540909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089211140189518,0.11281238250301187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645813359992297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651100098293438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496352537428916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187335390043088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695517333667096,0.0,0.10716214323660808,0.0,0.1694256420904904,0.0,0.0,0.07869485618330394,0.0818548370214901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22605228769257255,0.0,0.16143494813441686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095496745355004,0.0,0.1062557327439608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11071787000759463,0.0,0.0,0.08779273184450469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798490511103943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887303409166699,0.4862912060374059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103108361972425,0.0,0.17060829501522934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425622807228131,0.12377178055569105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17026391242831151,0.0,0.0,0.09838458087450727,0.0,0.1184915684080082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15078495822394125,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gotothewater,2020/01/12,"Advice about uni counselling? hi so I’m at university in the UK and there’s a free counselling service, you can just call and make an appointment. I had a really tough time last semester and have been thinking about making a counselling appointment since probably the start of that semester but I’ve only recently decided to actually do it (I’m planning to when I go back to uni & I have time around exams). I’ve made a list of things that I’m doing or feeling that don’t feel quite right to me, if that makes sense, and honestly I just haven’t been feeling great for a long time. If anyone has any advice or experiences they want to share, I’d really appreciate it. If you haven’t used uni counselling services, I’d still be interested to hear your experience. I’m worried about what will actually happen if I go to an appointment and what happens after that? Like what kind of thing happens in a first counselling appointment and would they refer you to a GP if they thought you should be diagnosed with something? Thanks for reading",4.575483668341708,6.521602814070356,5.3892682160804055,78.57676664572865,71.1105527638191,8.995100502512562,30.025439698492466,9.516144504307137,2.9163087939698498,836,35,153,20,16,272,112,199,0.021,0.8059999999999999,0.17300000000000001,0.9842,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,5,3,3,11,9,0,0,11,0,17,1,0,5,0,33,40,16,0,8,10,0,3,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,12,8,0,0,7,1,1,2,3,1,0,1,5,4,14,9,22,30,0,19,0,0,0,0,12,5,0,7,13,98,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.2573115114430116,0.0,0.0,0.2576629091107305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284740118626488,0.0,0.08965497804358448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218482952594627,0.0,0.0,0.11736457913975837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137598193153637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346222650232382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13381371591755073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579274988609059,0.0,0.0,0.19998513883223729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214210736306944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498541787134541,0.0,0.0,0.14535286094256347,0.0,0.0,0.3497541314724629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14859203050383532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372899342356123,0.0,0.1074663059108595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440983076032497,0.0,0.0,0.1166732844022711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474916200070027,0.2640104834911462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026943003664528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214464076816738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022690649002628,0.1318745849730995,0.0,0.1689187601355492,0.0,0.13017501598440145,0.0,0.0,0.1125897066429285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905850666336353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149603205387538,0.0,0.0,0.09331625729422954,0.0,0.10528672182666303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137955290312676,0.0,0.0,0.17517582387781652,0.08447704849934448,0.0,0.1046653660000664,0.23062898153762354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386648616251745,0.0,0.0,0.07776200346730634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13388881017135973,0.0,0.09365457723952812,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Good_Elemements574,2020/01/12,"In a weird headspace right now Like honestly I am in such a weird headspace. I literally feel like crying so hard right now. Nothing is wrong but I honestly feel like everything is wrong. I haven't felt this way in a long time. I get depressed some times but never like this. My anxiety gets high some times but not like this. I honestly have no clue why I am feeling this way. It truly sucks. 

I am currently sitting in my room, all lights off, tv off, seriously just scrolling through my phone. I need to get up and take a shower but have no motivation to move. I feel like the second I move I am going to just bawl. Ugh....",1.6148123076923042,3.8889019520000048,2.886400000000002,91.49458461538464,81.48,6.726153846153848,23.215384615384608,7.882392219407189,1.1168523076923085,484,17,106,9,13,156,70,125,0.159,0.568,0.273,0.9572,2,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,6,17,1,0,5,0,9,0,0,1,2,19,21,6,0,1,7,0,6,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,6,1,0,3,5,8,0,1,1,7,15,9,11,20,3,25,0,1,0,0,1,11,1,2,14,64,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011563662310453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811410323641914,0.0,0.0,0.12397748471994137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293662588112812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911266598352941,0.3084977030227669,0.1382073959297342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256120828343157,0.0,0.08180585336107095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894422801948288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208317925522807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4219382774983618,0.0,0.0,0.127384603845015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059762453949598,0.0,0.106731557415668,0.11101734803300738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138116733617171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458522574591501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822686393524657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25180212932942503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285097506399364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988573878904167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147571063246345,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tenfiftypm,2020/01/12,Why am I so quiet around people and quite sad when I come home I would be the quiet one In the group but I feel really lonley. I get really sad when I get home and I curl up on the couch and don't do anything due to me(F19) living at home in an area where nothing happens,0.13349999999999795,1.9179440166666664,2.4700000000000024,95.165,83.83333333333334,5.333333333333334,15.0,6.42735559955562,-0.6344999999999992,211,3,50,2,6,72,41,60,0.12,0.88,0.0,-0.7774,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,10,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,0,3,7,0,7,8,0,12,0,2,0,0,1,8,0,0,3,32,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834200672211249,0.19841999224579213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200061518950412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270024280242676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23290239860065254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19710152348452614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6707326827110599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968165852096562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21386965278328912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510365171846593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452435747194654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23707171194530235,0.0,0.0,0.2855789994045175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20112420217893007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583351691443587,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wowgirl22,2020/01/12,"I have been thinking about trying to train my dog to be a service dog to help me with getting out of this 'dead space' in my life but I'm kind of scared to actually get diagnosed by a doctor. Am I just overreacting? I am 22(F). For the past few months I haven't been as happy as I usually am. It wasn't as bad but now I lost a lot of interest in a lot of things. I don't draw anymore, I don't read, I've noticed I haven't been eating even half as much as I usually can, I find myself irritated and avoiding people. I have been ignoring a lot of texts and calls from everyone. I even have been forgetting a lot of things and misplacing things. I can't even count how many times I put something on the stove and forgot about it until I can smell it burning. I lose my keys for days in my own house in my own room. I've been getting headaches, my right knee aches at random times in the day, I get cramps in my neck or back some days. I find myself staying inside unless it's to take my dog out. I would like to figure out if I am just stressing out because i am working or if I am really struggling with something. I am kind of scared to ask a doctor something because If i am diagnosed with something, I don't know how I will take it or if I could even tell someone. Am I just not getting out enough or should I be concerned?",3.1942441209406525,3.6817783049645416,4.676435237028746,87.97026315789476,72.68794326241135,7.780813736468833,26.89884285181038,7.85451343220497,1.3489758865248225,1030,34,234,13,19,346,133,282,0.157,0.7959999999999999,0.047,-0.9851,0,1,4,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,3,13,14,0,5,10,0,33,9,2,2,0,47,46,23,1,7,15,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,2,0,9,12,1,3,5,1,0,1,8,9,0,1,9,1,41,5,43,31,10,30,0,2,0,0,4,16,0,14,13,173,50,5,0.0,0.0,0.09629309152186484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978596193482963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224830833969104,0.0,0.0,0.0758753982789795,0.08238995302176531,0.12030338487196032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075875746145513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878438824249255,0.0,0.0,0.1909126774523596,0.0,0.0,0.20030718907938685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20199718992369006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096971032719106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195820897175392,0.0,0.2606970503640237,0.0,0.0,0.09428870574615147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803753091805818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257769481087718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504194566661323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614013350902807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385832307258645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20551077762890613,0.054229495407044685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969745107081651,0.04820788384887665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039268742897176,0.10771600673690536,0.3355616568692031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004150836670438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876187346302216,0.0,0.07253787459825034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234275467330447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419696693020056,0.06840919403196752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919617062444244,0.0,0.0,0.09870224156710576,0.0,0.06321407673630197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426837078051667,0.0,0.0,0.19758285638087064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08360746361188824,0.30386100175186354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517499491210244,0.0,0.0,0.11303249603634935,0.10315709766450468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14838344935715295,0.0,0.08624677000621647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19666692966615187,0.06322730076882709,0.0,0.0,0.11507700012981036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066994213453161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21735432990850184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183696729530327,0.0,0.0,0.07009627145705667,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GrimBoo,2020/01/12,"Advice needed, dont know what's wrong with me So I'm posting this on here because i cant find anywhere else to ask. This is serious and it's making me question who I am. I'm a 22(F) married to a 22(M) we have a nice life. But before I met him 3 years ago I was in a 6 year extremely abusive relationship where I ended up in the ER alot, i was sexually abused, raped and beaten, I cant use my left arm properly because of it. He manipulated me emotionally abused me and I could never find an out until I met my husband.

But even after all these years I feel worse and worse. I never seeked therapy after all that happened and used my husband as a shield but I dont know what's wrong with me.

I feel empty a shell with no emotions besides rage and sadness. I have nightmares every time I try to sleep and it's gotten worse. I can barely sleep. I hate the way I look and even though my husband and everyone else considers I'm beautiful, all I see is an ugly girl I cant even look at myself. Then it got worse a month ago I started to have violent thoughts and images pop into my head about hurting everyone around me and I just want to feel pain or see it. 

I know these are wrong but I just feel so empty I cant feel anything not even love for my husband anymore. I need help but I dont want to hear what they tell me so I'm asking here first what i should be prepared for and even made this reddit to seek advice. I had suicidal ideation and thought about it constantly and even made plans on what to do.

My husband stopped me but even after all that i just can't feel. I have no interest in the things i loved before nothing interests me besides pain and then i feel something again. I need help what do i do. I know this is wrong but how do I stop this, i tried getting a hobby but i just have no interest in anything. Just yesterday there was a voice in my head telling me to do something bad but I ignored it and it's just getting louder and louder it scares me what is it. I'm seeing a therapist soon but I'd like some advice here too.",1.7041152765905494,3.3910411461716947,3.508131029429723,90.11255434118941,78.37354988399072,6.392990597142509,24.10312614482843,7.273561745256523,0.9113767981438516,1598,55,351,20,38,536,190,431,0.22399999999999998,0.6729999999999999,0.10300000000000001,-0.9952,0,0,2,0,2,0,31.0,1,0,1,3,29,24,5,1,16,0,32,11,5,7,6,83,79,37,1,7,18,5,7,1,0,1,3,2,0,1,28,24,0,3,16,0,0,0,14,17,1,1,12,14,63,7,34,64,6,40,0,2,5,3,24,14,0,4,25,241,91,1,0.0,0.2385798035743929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967675936785168,0.11899622413329272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665653196526135,0.0,0.0,0.11046860532492307,0.059751313321539976,0.1254968734384575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05604266188220256,0.08183184568490602,0.0,0.11422889388433112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253321878904201,0.0,0.05359011226409826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359935383025214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214082593530626,0.15100264712287864,0.05944867935005836,0.0,0.0,0.31032635891797444,0.0,0.056551762760061526,0.12827268038485493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375663465167263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269350926361895,0.05709250817156155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07013519169422759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368224983337152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059354275507117124,0.0,0.0,0.06626741802688478,0.13776962088608075,0.0,0.07564947650130319,0.0,0.0899786685910839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185368859566263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14755028561973293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292642185904756,0.0,0.047409065561443565,0.03279159697888611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127283248110611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115741502897424,0.12702173551744628,0.044803333438634296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05357479743350383,0.0,0.0,0.14930659587504785,0.10353465410003472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440375533123363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284150129548867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428271083973039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519011732582817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206210241532424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719914751588522,0.0,0.16045860996081462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433758290938794,0.0,0.0,0.10334499994112377,0.0,0.0,0.04750810652114462,0.0,0.0,0.11223118253321687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341873378394237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11733223269622675,0.0,0.07675793318529707,0.0779318624540045,0.044591756795796855,0.0,0.06594537161094638,0.10657207010194199,0.03913839717197935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114058000804436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159408084004208,0.0,0.0,0.07917860512502263,0.053276984206010916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736053530171177,0.0,0.2935421238774306,0.0,0.12966985242782456
mentalhealth,pshermanwallabyway9,2020/01/13,"Intrusive thoughts involving animal cruelty Hi, guys. I’m 18 years old and have been struggling with mental health issues for most of my life. Last year I was diagnosed with OCD, although I’m not sure of how much I should trust this diagnosis, since I don’t really engage in any of the “physical” stuff associated with it, like ritualistic behavior (unless self harm can be put in that category), and I only had 2 sessions with my psychiatrist.

I do have a serious problem with intrusive thoughts, though. Sometimes they’re so bad that I feel like I’m going crazy. The first instance that I can remember of experiencing any symptom of mental illness was when I was 7. I had a pet rabbit and immediately after getting him I started feeling a strong impulse to hurt him, with images of stuff I could to do him popping up everytime I pet him. One day it got so bad I actually purposely drop him, which hurt his mouth. It wasn’t anything serious, but I feel guilty about this to this day. 

I never did anything else to any animal, because this is truly not how I feel about them. I seriously love animals, but thinking of hurting them has been a recurring problem for me. It got better for some time, but now I adopted a kitten and it’s happening again. This is scary, it’s like someone else is putting thoughts in my brain. It makes me seriously doubt my character and feel like a freak. I feel so ashamed of this that I haven’t told anyone but my doctor, not even my therapist. 

I don’t even know what’s the point of putting this here, tbh. Maybe I just want to know if anyone else with OCD has experienced this to feel less like a trash person, although that’s what I am. I would appreciate if anyone had any advice on how to control this too. I’m sure I won’t do anything to my cat btw, just to be clear, but it’s extremely disturbing to have to live with those intrusive thoughts (not only relating to animal cruelty, but a bunch of other things) every minute of every day. I can’t take this anymore.",5.504807197943448,6.210101609254497,6.555520822622107,75.77681850899745,67.61182519280207,10.131455012853472,32.526580976863755,10.17224662633116,3.2787656760925445,1582,66,302,38,25,530,192,389,0.17300000000000001,0.7240000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.9757,0,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,2,4,18,29,0,4,11,0,34,9,2,5,4,61,63,24,0,8,15,0,7,5,0,3,6,0,2,3,31,13,0,1,15,0,0,4,11,17,0,2,17,9,43,12,43,40,5,27,0,3,0,1,15,6,0,5,21,205,74,2,0.0,0.0,0.08036941591595234,0.0,0.0,0.08047917247192772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240247450698689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167689212672283,0.17275964523537046,0.08438538623193258,0.2033205670971117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753078849272352,0.05020460254241623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07283885692395638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193863753256623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237137154756653,0.06575606999705688,0.0,0.0,0.15934206842152074,0.0,0.0,0.08359152009581662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429678554429001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063983360416417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087932131871096,0.0,0.1387801410895265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914983501716645,0.11767297962011375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005357527776236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04302859594298923,0.0,0.04680588423045519,0.0,0.13173824903544712,0.0,0.0,0.08154725486813412,0.07282880609834574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754258098817885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644974591707523,0.0,0.0,0.08596023514288999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052347997969017,0.06713266878939249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817181009418805,0.20117951382828625,0.0,0.07272352170478229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433120707086986,0.0,0.05497452804677175,0.0,0.08273956557080757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16599475547252532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06054252201386871,0.0,0.06351947844942167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642074667564438,0.0,0.0558078346090236,0.12527376612228122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191172886939093,0.0,0.0,0.07785482215640274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15761074737024813,0.0,0.24837726678581126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052760570303313804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329542948665033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591723609524636,0.0,0.0,0.06812729389405307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978156906693493,0.0,0.08145405458007486,0.0,0.058293335204017714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609834366984226,0.1885601497413444,0.0,0.0,0.15524266471233886,0.08560137723722848,0.0619228802811924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562385272254023,0.054714919549077264,0.052771607520556485,0.08091620428525115,0.2615318462786381,0.04802354530123678,0.0,0.0,0.07869648890199572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04857681464830873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058504678849266065,0.0,0.0,0.10607155602053477
mentalhealth,drugzpix,2020/01/13,"Those of you who have been admitted to stay at the hospital for your own safety, what was it like? My therapist is putting me in a hospital as I said I was going to commit suicide and other things. 

The rooms are apparently quite nice he said, not your normal hospital bed but this may be due to the fact that I’m on private healthcare.

Has anyone experienced this?",2.8131187122736416,5.215618239436619,4.320643863179075,82.15126760563383,77.8732394366197,8.000804828973843,25.635814889336014,8.841846274778883,2.2049702213279683,289,11,55,7,7,96,59,71,0.038,0.84,0.122,0.4778,1,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,0,9,0,0,0,2,8,14,3,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,2,0,9,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,3,7,2,9,7,1,8,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,2,42,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027474237351593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479147830690255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166026359248135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841001462371037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914908217517769,0.0,0.30840914036947753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5516384884100215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30905977016731256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31717019415541703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3366669877223616,0.1926371571903535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,panda-plant,2020/01/13,"How do I stop this? My boyfriend and I were really close, he’s the first person I’ve been able to get over my touch issues and general not sharing emotions with. We dated for three months and it’s the first time I’ve been honestly happy and hopeful in so so long. And not all from him of course, that wouldn’t be healthy. But he made me want to take steps to improve myself.

But he dumped me. For mental health reasons. And I really understand that and I want him to get better. Well probably even get back together after this.

However, since he broke up with me Saturday night, I’ve had the worst couple days of my life in so long. I feel stupid and broken. I’m repressing emotions again. I have no one else to talk to about my feelings even though we are still in contact and are friends, I don’t want to make him feel worse by him knowing how much this damaged me.

I’m crying almost every hour and I can’t really think about anything for more than a couple seconds before I’m on the verge of tears again.

How do I get over a break up that’s not really a break up because we’re most likely gonna get back together?",2.0875383022774368,4.020134482608697,3.303167701863355,90.88789855072464,78.08695652173913,6.641821946169772,21.821946169772254,7.62386473244151,0.7868467908902694,881,25,188,13,21,285,129,230,0.154,0.7340000000000001,0.113,-0.9028,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,2,0,0,3,17,14,2,1,7,0,13,2,0,6,1,43,35,19,0,5,5,0,4,1,1,2,2,0,0,1,7,15,0,2,7,0,0,1,7,6,1,5,5,4,24,8,30,27,5,32,0,2,0,0,15,11,0,3,19,122,31,0,0.12022400886885795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203869785600606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893411554963556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18488968366992767,0.0,0.07328743992754916,0.0,0.10230177663073836,0.0,0.0,0.10632836594405368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660511582323929,0.1320604284578953,0.07753453983631256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043173260205984,0.27047165653652416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588136479964973,0.0,0.10129391269099737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18236661363413426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20452496105477436,0.0,0.0,0.09288477102353118,0.0,0.31406041285501235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798069299726028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277924994994889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940956771824933,0.11839643145343555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548263008097812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607197114486857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491777291041619,0.05873537798406993,0.0,0.0,0.2127889292400217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375886408663705,0.08025045947469117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115752395114393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09596165687517297,0.0,0.08837847967036576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282208812571007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814668998313431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497496728808972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962181557339064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3080743143723133,0.12361030439758773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09945054249694704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601104878235324,0.10051265468912762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039349260686916,0.0966315043242716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703469045045151,0.11811947830301925,0.0,0.07010358638729977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12515743315987685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21273370598254387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080958222961319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12251853606178947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InternetUserPers,2020/01/13,"How should I talk to my parents about my possible ADHD? Ok Reddit, I need your help a little bit here. So, recently at school I’ve been having a lot of issues. I couldn’t concentrate for long, was easily distracted, made stupid mistakes, and involuntarily spaces out very often. This was annoying and interfering with my schoolwork, so I looked it up. After looking into the symptoms and taking many credited tests, I determined that I probably have ADHD (predominantly inattentive type). As I’ve mentioned, this has been disruptive and annoying, and was hoping it could be cured by medicine. Obviously to get medicine for this, I need a diagnosis. I’m under 18, so my parents still take me to the doctor. I need to talk to them about this, and to get a possible diagnosis, but I can’t find a way to talk to them. I don’t know how exactly to bring it up and to not make it awkward. I’m also worried my parents might not believe me, as they’ve been skeptical of previous issues I’ve brought up to them. Any tips?",5.49198884017537,6.5482442331606245,6.891191709844557,72.0987963332005,67.80829015544043,10.498047030689516,32.98086887206058,10.560738912317856,3.7252561976883225,799,35,144,22,13,273,111,193,0.09300000000000001,0.84,0.066,-0.7135,3,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,3,0,11,10,4,2,7,1,16,2,0,4,2,32,33,16,0,8,3,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,9,10,0,0,2,0,1,2,5,7,0,0,8,2,21,3,29,20,2,16,0,0,2,0,12,9,0,4,4,102,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.299750848314495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972937013630223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480608002763634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14050381327810746,0.0,0.0,0.13614942065507726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956961732480148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12764446960914005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398134142181846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031012444200826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835895020601718,0.0,0.0,0.12386371373168704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603266198454559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853654925614093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499071386779916,0.0,0.11036312885265624,0.20944752098649375,0.0,0.0,0.10602273657473864,0.0,0.11800223085068287,0.08324391528376962,0.12643488039799414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229604778064716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27740939489143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4154222085422848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811802701245046,0.0,0.0,0.13445689289695206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313463305746652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621169497802984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09959239689667636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961991758887506,0.18753059583773127,0.30070798892745554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289760165424154,0.0,0.09898783013309406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664757047486508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Asanoii,2020/01/13,"Advice? I want to fix my mental health but I dont know how. If I google it it just says some generic bullshit, which I guess could normally work but I've fallen way too deep. I've come to the decision that I should just make myself even more delusional the only thing that is stopping me is this tiny spark of hope that maybe there is a way to be normal and happy, I thought it is supposed to help me but it's just bringing me down. 
I'd be better off crazy than stuck like this, in this hopeless fight. How do I stop holding on and let go? I'm getting worse.",0.9296327683615822,2.9657004661016977,2.245000000000001,96.48128531073448,82.47457627118644,4.950282485875707,20.002824858757066,5.985473137389443,-0.16340903954802274,437,12,99,3,12,140,82,118,0.22,0.618,0.162,-0.8541,0,0,0,0,1,1,10.0,0,0,0,2,8,6,1,0,3,0,11,1,0,3,0,27,23,8,0,7,7,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,12,3,0,3,3,0,0,4,1,2,0,0,2,1,12,4,10,16,2,13,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,4,3,64,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18517970895486174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675996150493218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16323967621532887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513023746400712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22209558962991105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516465400585786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900726646062934,0.0,0.10769867225205372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20875843515974407,0.0,0.0,0.2017289994973896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20143236033152606,0.0,0.0,0.127019571797981,0.0,0.0,0.18821880130570853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041456513613351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937792073595445,0.0,0.09258137894347136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649443068246094,0.0,0.19038079295358398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19097400956227428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3713445482826129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14412523661507148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507000422297715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31686525197512994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258970807772784,0.0,0.0,0.15044386543984115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177352005782384,0.300836623902029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379601210491883,0.0,0.19311929886298335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Marthuzar,2020/01/13,"I feel empty, what should I do? I feel nothing, pleasure or pain.  People who try to cheer me up just get a fake smile, I feel that my social interactions are algorithms, and people who want to hurt me stop caring.  I don't care about anyone or anything, it's as if he will stop being human.  Maybe they have hurt me so much that I stop feeling or people who try to cheer me up seem to be liars.",4.1740243902439005,4.12186006097561,5.196243902439028,87.01826829268295,70.34146341463415,7.5356097560975615,23.717073170731698,6.742157984588678,0.6162263414634142,303,6,67,2,5,100,55,82,0.27,0.5539999999999999,0.17600000000000002,-0.8599,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,3,10,1,0,1,0,8,1,0,0,0,16,17,7,0,3,5,0,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,7,1,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,12,5,8,13,1,5,0,2,0,0,8,2,0,5,3,44,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225569140264545,0.0,0.1442370481114473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3574107172012833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3544988416925677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157437073593223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3752727359406358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17608809876459888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884787975726816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818185635540414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18650580799919325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3645425092370373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15956450451141027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17867160407914348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43961524888545067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23800152423142146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338220748984668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThatScarletRose,2020/01/13,"It's only getting harder and more painful Hello. I'm 17 (soon 18), non-binary and from Germany. For about two years now, I've been in love with my male best friend. I confessed to him on June 3rd 2018, so about half a year after realizing that I am into boys too and in love with him. He seemed to have kind of figured that this might be the case, and knowing that the situation was highly stressful, I offered him to think about it for some time first (so he'd know how to respond properly). One week later, he rejected me as he is straight. From that day on, my life just got worse and worse, I began feeling utter sadness, either due to feeling lonely or for no apparent reason.
He and I have actually only gotten closer since that day, but it was always difficult for me to be around him without feeling hurt, and it still is. As I also have slight social anxiety too, I went to my school psychologist. After a few sessions, it got much better and I felt that we are done, so did the school psychologist. However, tjese emotions, the love is still there and in the past few days, being on a class trip with him and thus being close to him day and night, I felt all of this much more strongly. I even experienced something like a half breakdown, where a lack of sleep, audiosensory overload and these emotions led to a massive headache as well as short and shallow breath for about 30 minutes. I drowned everything out with music on my headphones. Since the trip, it hasn't improved at all, so far that I cried last night (and even though I often want to, I rarely ever get to actually cry).

I don't know what to do, how to get over these emotions and my love for him. Soon we'll graduate and while it seems like finally getting free from everything, I still want to keep contact with him, which might prove difficult with my emotional state remaining the same.",7.685672514619881,6.552799803324097,7.463799630655585,77.27196291166514,63.432132963988934,10.45989535241613,34.73699599876885,9.444778638647367,2.9710589719913814,1463,53,286,22,18,466,197,361,0.109,0.748,0.14300000000000002,0.9191,2,3,1,0,0,0,49.0,2,0,0,4,29,21,0,1,13,0,24,8,2,5,4,64,52,31,1,3,5,0,5,2,1,3,2,0,0,2,20,27,0,1,16,0,1,4,4,8,1,5,12,6,35,14,55,32,13,52,1,4,0,4,28,19,0,7,30,207,55,5,0.0,0.0,0.1681738166998865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689080023837417,0.07169814179326853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591779045830627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670721418027376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042732260388132,0.0762080228738312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893015859557665,0.22228326121240932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817912047546657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3877067046982332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138254501678485,0.07794330545682529,0.0,0.0,0.1548833245161078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307064106540091,0.0,0.16546834662304186,0.09439212519416988,0.0,0.07329390784831925,0.0,0.0,0.06657268445671716,0.0,0.180075545516897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378318101056014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104054110581884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224393531051067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658950396543057,0.0,0.08973004008020416,0.1420659739370945,0.07023789464494892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06086255086207979,0.08419403400346236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110776070860201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828198927431119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668584042413408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16172445040830322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058389229540814824,0.13106831212500625,0.09168814059987347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225649005467732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859439173483707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17441192632653335,0.0,0.15688704691121058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425570523939027,0.09685571689940592,0.08622958368494922,0.08783676675679879,0.0,0.0663358393671191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20644008219582585,0.0,0.09870441362468538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055212561575670734,0.08465898844996693,0.0,0.050244877437051534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417298488860954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016474765857732,0.0,0.06911825436706973,0.0,0.07747480011536753,0.07987800103612565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830622549952404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17562379174674644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097790257629857
mentalhealth,RainingRice,2020/01/13,"Man I feel so stupid I really want to die, all my suicide attempts failed because it was either not enough or I would chicken out last second. I feel like a big idiot for it but idk what to do. I can't get professional help or anything because of my parents. I kinda want pasta now",2.316724137931036,4.052828258620689,4.192620689655172,85.66444827586207,76.75862068965517,6.019310344827588,25.393103448275863,6.742157984588678,1.0400372413793106,221,8,44,2,5,75,46,58,0.27,0.642,0.08800000000000001,-0.8844,1,0,0,0,0,2,4.0,0,0,0,2,2,4,2,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,13,9,4,2,3,5,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,2,8,1,5,7,3,4,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,3,3,31,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23557317694529434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34901115672800426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29709973268396705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295790118366331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894901811094308,0.20450905222359225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14956258273090425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19187859532546486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333456416533581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985549387004167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178653932911191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338983617718446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131294056607781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3376951397283613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20335571446792736,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stephaniecali20,2020/01/13,Mental health issues to parents ‪My brother spoke up about his mental issues to a nurse today and my dad told me about it and referred to him as “ retarded “ and “ slow “ for wanting to kill himself.. i love my dad but I think it’s a miscommunication with what he’s trying to understand‬.  So I doubt he’d take him to therapy,3.662812500000001,5.22334840625,5.25825,80.16175000000003,72.75,7.620000000000001,26.8625,8.238735603445708,1.7948475,254,9,49,4,5,86,45,64,0.14,0.8190000000000001,0.040999999999999995,-0.7422,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,7,6,1,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,11,1,12,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,13,1,0,1,2,33,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450921256915988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4813240943619306,0.0,0.0,0.2550988265448576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20810436864640675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4647339273434498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560280087416738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17336489495452734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636844178345881,0.0,0.0,0.14774416423845735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185596402588184,0.2203258063874076,0.0,0.15654636454653295,0.0,0.0,0.2400383548283371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360000428030384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,n1c3cleantoilet1,2020/01/13,"Memory Problems I have been noticing that I am forgetting certain words or my memory of entire events are fazy. Just today, I completely forgot that you cannot put foil in a microwave and I put a pizza in with a foil wrap. 

Should I be concerned?",5.704375000000002,6.236885687500003,6.629166666666666,76.0325,67.125,9.733333333333334,30.583333333333336,9.725611199111238,2.919783333333333,195,7,35,4,3,65,37,48,0.065,0.885,0.05,-0.1531,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,7,1,0,0,1,10,8,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,7,1,4,4,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3649921159896029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3963314103254655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33309918857162163,0.0,0.6999037600030102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3299724621259114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notrealacc917272,2020/01/13,"I feel stupid. I hope this fits here too
I‘m 17 years old and I feel literally stupid. Because of anxiety two years I stopped school. I have a job and a school currently (dual system in Austria) and I feel stupid. I did a school year again and then 1 year later I changed to dual system. Now im some IT guy and I just feel stupid. If I would‘ve gone to an IT School, I would‘ve known everything so much better. I lost so much time. My clssmates will all be done with school next year and going to universities in 2 years then. And I‘m just here doing my work and school shit. I want to go back but I‘d probably have +2 years again and be done at like 21 or 22... I don‘t know what to do. I hate having a job and once a week school where I don‘t learn shit. I lost so much time and I feel so stupid compared to my friends. I am already shaking when I do an IQ test on the internet cause I‘m afraid of being stupid.
I just wish to turn back time and not lose that many years. It‘s all my fault, I know, I stopped school, nobody forced me. It was my decision. But I‘m so unhappy with my education and everything when I look at my friends. I just know that I could‘ve been on their level but I‘m not
I want to go back to school but I‘d be 17 and in class with 15 yo people who probably think I‘m stupid too and I‘d finish school so late compared to my friends...
Sorry for my English, I‘m not from any English-Speaking country...",1.1359271899886243,3.2443076040955674,2.153470989761093,97.01876166097841,82.1740614334471,5.544891922639363,20.68816837315131,6.742157984588678,0.12109246871444855,1100,32,255,12,30,346,138,293,0.195,0.727,0.078,-0.9886,3,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,1,5,23,22,10,2,8,0,19,2,2,1,2,53,48,31,0,5,13,0,5,1,3,1,0,0,0,1,9,18,0,2,12,0,0,5,5,16,0,1,8,6,38,6,24,35,6,47,0,3,1,0,6,10,2,4,31,154,47,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512457541461133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04629464089191111,0.0,0.0520786584044349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704085085951938,0.0,0.041499059313245296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060208504613544864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699337507518175,0.07201635598124498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054353882130792425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933265243621856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236629434840544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17210868427660264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157788181405164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606904950083904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740685505369523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672118657037833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06761574340988616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353475698421094,0.0,0.13511167975437335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223988662427932,0.0,0.07679373236677642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033258945013721834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05716746822050344,0.07616066145169965,0.14862800268897958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901931302955434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501331103998465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240057804145256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07143527705766611,0.07249969931710475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719596549549133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14679687046207265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.688974787357609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975996269710242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620653977473732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383070885814585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043620942297086,0.0,0.0,0.11908860068384675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404814151565735,0.06650126007588564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030706390457032,0.0,0.05460719987224456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828509971330275,0.0,0.0,0.04956080944595746,0.0,0.0,0.09671978323568303,0.0,0.0,0.3507144422486283
mentalhealth,Mt_Deverest,2020/01/13,"I don't want to exercise My boyfriend keeps urging me to, saying how much it has helped him mentally and how it'll help me. Obviously it will help me. This ain't my first rodeo. I just can't seem to overcome my fatigue and simply have no desire whatsoever to do any simple exercise.

How have some of you overcome this issue?

I am on anti depressants, currently not drinking or smoking anything, eating healthy.",4.876153846153844,6.648778666666665,5.818461538461541,76.50153846153849,70.02564102564102,8.78974358974359,32.230769230769226,9.2995712137729,3.139753846153845,328,15,57,7,6,108,56,78,0.124,0.746,0.13,0.3565,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,10,5,0,3,1,14,13,6,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,5,2,2,1,1,3,0,0,5,2,0,1,0,1,11,0,6,11,2,3,0,2,0,0,6,1,0,3,2,43,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18240180225311275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22072584206160914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310212984510943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627578158341897,0.0,0.27446054222318217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281515531858372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5393555209808191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799566058164588,0.0,0.2384101871550915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27030712659273715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19717580974966475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133028231742205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24418143661821964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582057113700275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,greenlight144000,2020/01/13,Some days I wake up and feel like I’m in a different world. I do have major anxiety and I’m not sure if it’s a depersonalization episode or what it just feels weird on certain days it’s hard to explain.,-0.52901515151515,1.6794762500000004,2.2881818181818185,91.71893939393942,93.3181818181818,5.660606060606061,20.96969696969697,7.1686216300943375,0.6149969696969699,161,6,38,3,6,56,34,44,0.163,0.725,0.111,-0.0418,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,2,1,1,0,2,12,7,4,0,1,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,2,3,4,7,2,6,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,3,3,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933001482577489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4945228975025536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4005716674350734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3877173810642936,0.27390122120272803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3434513240343927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18730999995557168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.361350206179424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Scale4Throwaway,2020/01/13,"I'm not sure if I'm depressed or what I have low motion to do stuff like going to gym and my hobby which I used to love.

I like listening to sad songs and sadness is kinda comfortable. Hard to explain.

I don't have appetite

I've thought about going to a therapist a few times but it feels silly because I'm not always sad. I feel like I'm just trying to get an excuse for being lazy or whatever.

What should I do? This is very vague since I posted this fast at midnight but if you have any questions ask me",0.879924242424245,2.908459601851857,2.8798316498316514,91.9028787878788,82.6111111111111,5.4087542087542095,20.929292929292927,6.574015621080383,0.3204888888888888,399,12,86,4,11,134,71,108,0.17800000000000002,0.696,0.126,-0.6935,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,2,12,0,0,3,0,10,1,0,1,1,20,25,8,0,3,9,0,3,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,7,2,0,0,5,2,0,3,3,5,0,0,1,5,10,7,10,22,1,8,0,5,0,1,7,2,0,6,5,52,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895670846182013,0.0,0.0,0.15492753255628364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21298386137166075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388788580911389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19622371761058655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303884274530919,0.1627568809454889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190281760477763,0.0,0.2589542561712237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20408476461323435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339086028401198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20561925870873696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21819157081706447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552140318124554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18845763738198795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608029637865125,0.0,0.0,0.21472059244030348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26452019934151816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18086610751951426,0.13284549214962987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467694234856996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967660260140503,0.0,0.1879779318305479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway17384886,2020/01/13,"I haven’t gotten help for 10 years and I’m at a breaking point (M22) I’m pretty sure this is what the end feels like. I’ve never felt so close to ending my life and I’m questioning if I’m going to live to see the end of this month. I’ve never been diagnosed or told a single person what’s wrong with me and it all started when I was 12. Back then I had started having really bad depressive issues and anxiety and some mood issues, I was constantly from high to the next low and then back on a high, bi-polar maybe, I don’t know. I self harmed badly back then as well, mostly cutting but I’d often do stuff like slam the side of my wrist on the side of a table or something, I’d get massive bumps and bruises, 2 fractures and purposely sprained my ankle a few times and I really can’t explain why I did it, I have no idea. 

I’ve tried to think back about what might have caused this and I can’t remember anything from before the point. It’s like my memory starts at 12 years old, it’s kind of fuzzy, and slow fades back in to when I was about 16-17, around grade 11 because I don’t remember grade 10 but from the start of grade 11 and on, I remember most of I think. All I really know from before I was 12 is what my mom has told me. Like I don’t remember anything, and we used to go to Florida and Disney world for 3 weeks every year, you’d think that’s something I might remember a little bit. There’s pictures, it happened, but if it weren’t for the pictures I’d be questioning if it did.

Today, I feel like I’ve reached an all time low with depression, anxiety, what I think might be bi-polar disorder and something new, borderline personality disorder. I hate to say that I think I know what’s wrong with me but I’ve known for the last 2 years that something new has come along. I’m a different person completely, I forget who I used to be, different thoughts etc. I’ve researched for so long and didn’t find anything that seemed to explain me. Then I finally came across BPD and fit me perfectly, I got this wretched feeling in my stomach that made me sick, it literally explained everything so well. 

I’m at the point if I don’t get help, I’m done. I was trying to get into nursing school and that was my last hope keeping me going but I’m so mentally exhausted I’ve flunked out and stopped trying and basically ruined any chance of trying again. I just don’t know how to get help. I can’t barely explain myself anymore than what I have. I have major issues disassociating and when I try and talk about this stuff or think about what the root of my issue is, my brain goes blank in the blink of an eye. Like I’m at an hour now trying to write this because I just keep going in and out of consciousness trying to think of what happened before I was 12 that could have possibly been so bad that has caused me to be whatever the hell I am today. Where do I start with help, literally where? Am I calling my doctors office and telling the receptionist I want an appointment and when she asks for what? What do I say? I’m seriously lost and need someone to navigate me",3.414677850051355,4.454856927559057,4.771333447449507,85.44153971242726,72.63779527559055,8.167408421773366,26.08781239301609,8.587818076936951,1.6488979801437869,2419,78,516,42,46,806,256,635,0.138,0.77,0.092,-0.9845,3,0,4,0,0,0,55.0,1,1,0,2,30,31,3,0,25,0,50,9,4,7,7,115,114,53,0,8,14,1,4,6,0,3,5,2,0,4,36,39,0,3,32,0,0,6,14,18,2,0,24,8,64,12,65,81,11,86,1,7,2,0,28,31,1,18,54,318,100,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036387445689774284,0.0,0.08186733141367944,0.0,0.053065807090975886,0.0,0.0,0.13209819460886552,0.047633687972965466,0.050022991785815984,0.0,0.0,0.20572271151458285,0.13403146412393072,0.06523626656757496,0.0,0.1365947420980381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058417151791079334,0.0,0.06739176923692722,0.05973290457649628,0.054637907052814336,0.06119918460809015,0.0,0.10993542701002344,0.0,0.04609262046147573,0.05610238334250573,0.05782341038898217,0.0,0.04272198457442133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921731566983667,0.05430974862466308,0.0,0.11180946769934318,0.12265018321746422,0.054767962438412914,0.0,0.05475751864208708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217728540929278,0.0,0.05967584435157915,0.0,0.0,0.04508300942504728,0.0,0.048089765943508174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116613864410764,0.0764526106925445,0.05137631236301235,0.05861567372316915,0.0489055722099461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182341111429996,0.0,0.12163988901253725,0.0,0.0427954365536562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463433963879864,0.0,0.0,0.05282832020913548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346181148609088,0.11306881039201455,0.0,0.05314576684686705,0.052694849012201214,0.0,0.0,0.06040430255418881,0.0,0.22339484947640856,0.0,0.09512118443826142,0.0,0.05572060954967244,0.11762694198386114,0.08723273275268825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03779446024711183,0.1568485723708181,0.05362932482091542,0.04724876612316343,0.04735311850248145,0.0,0.0,0.05841057703041633,0.0,0.0,0.050630801057567794,0.0,0.0,0.05375623032472249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053923731931131806,0.17029139604217067,0.0,0.06266821709854171,0.0427097756065955,0.0,0.0,0.03967569026165568,0.08253772400366811,0.10335720487329908,0.05690663218540984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056147908574099736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14016402310610693,0.0,0.0,0.15174777832794864,0.06032251346163672,0.0,0.05443712803044006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988297455741533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283626762077164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030720889775715,0.0,0.0,0.08510381803088815,0.0,0.054153206880106,0.042639148467017184,0.04871190225997288,0.05582077571397314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04533736759800189,0.1647730637909517,0.0,0.0,0.18936707801189173,0.0,0.0,0.0447352939412044,0.0,0.0,0.12250829176623312,0.0,0.0,0.05043089350861031,0.0,0.0,0.04300790545525859,0.04676857001742801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24000148758784964,0.0,0.04247957452040548,0.062402183149336335,0.0,0.10143913115748328,0.10225885412807248,0.0,0.2543001313202326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242789796033027,0.0,0.0,0.031560552906711975,0.0,0.04292109154191822,0.0,0.09622068781667012,0.0,0.04828287402881876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700574563487047,0.0,0.1378302377346146
mentalhealth,Kay_Smilez143,2020/01/13,"How do I learn to turn off the emotions and listen to the rational side of myself Trigger warning ⚠️ (child abuse) 

I am codependent. That’s the first time I’ve written the words... I’m still not sure what all that entails or what I have to do. I do not have access or help where I live (20 minutes away from any friends or family-I have 2 sisters. 1 older, 1 younger). 

I do not have support from any family or friends. Partly because none of them know I struggle but that’s because none of them care (I feel) 

My mom is the reason for my codependency. My childhood with her was very traumatic. I lost my father at 12 and she spiraled out of control. I feel with everything in me that she is codependent 100%. But that’s for another time. She was never really a “mother” per-say. She abused me (threw me through walls, cut my head open hitting it against a refrigerator, slapping me 27 times while my daughter was in my arms, trying to physically break a door down to the bathroom to get to me to fight me, while my baby was in there with me and much much much more) but she never hit my other sisters or physically abused them. Just me. She never taught  us how to fix our hair, put on makeup, be a “woman”. She never taught us any tools to take into the real world. She never showed any examples of healthy relationships. Our clothes were hand-me-downs and bought by other people while she would spend my dads SS money from when he passed on her hair products and makeup and new outfits. We currently do not talk or have a relationship at all. 

With all that being said I also do not have any friends. I have 2 sisters. One moved away (to get away from my mother) and the other one may also suffer from mental health issues. Not sure if it’s codependency or she is just selfish. We are all hurt and still mourning because we were never offered the proper support or any guidance after my dad passed. Mom and dad had a toxic relationship for 18yrs, so when he died everybody (on my moms side) didn’t really blink. And my dads side distanced themselves with no contact to us kids at all. So me and my sisters were left to fight for ourselves . Literally. I took all the ‘lashes’ when she was drinking (and when she wasn’t or she was drugged up) so they wouldn’t. My older sister left pretty young and then I became a victim of statutory rape. Then got pregnant and I chose to keep my child and raise her. That alone was hard for me. I think it was more of I wanted to show how much better of a mother I could be than mine. I could love my child no matter what. I could help her and be there for her, I could love her and never let harm come to her. 

I finally was able to move out 2yrs after having my child and it was fantastic. But now that we are out (it’s been 5 years) I’m starting to realize more and more about my childhood and things that I didn’t remember that I do now, horrible, awful things. 

This I think has played a factor on my relationships with friends and my husband and other family members maybe. 

I had 1 very best friend that I think was the first person I ever became dependent on. She was there through the abuse with (okay I’m going to stop calling her mom, let’s name her Betty) Betty. I loved her and was basically obsessed with her. Obviously this isn’t her fault but about 2 years ago she told me that my love was too much. It CRUSHED me. I lost her. And still we talk but it will never be the same. Something inside me broke when she said those words.. now anytime I try to make new connections I think of her and “Betty”. How I wasn’t good enough for either of them. How I was too much and I don’t want to put that on anyone else. 

But I’m also hurt and have recently found that I’ve lost my ‘voice’ and have zero idea how to be assertive. When conflicts come up I take everything to heart and become very emotional (everything just hits me like a whirlwind ) and it is so hard for me to ignore those feelings long enough to utter back how I feel or get off my chest what is upsetting me. 

When I was living with “Betty” I was so strong, I took her shit and let it roll off of me. Now that time has slowed and I’ve allowed myself to really see what I went through, it literally shakes my insides... I feel so unpredictable and like a ball of Fire ready to explode. I have this feeling like there are words on the tip of my tongue but I can’t ever get them out. It gets all confused and jumbled and I literally sometimes say things that make absolutely no sense. So I shut down. Is there ANYONE that may understand what I mean and have some insight? I’m not even sure if most of this is relevant or even makes sense to the point I’m trying to make.. I’m just hurt and confused and trying to figure out how to not let Codependency define me. The only parts of myself I recognize are codependent parts.. if it helps I’m a Stay at home mother to a 15month old baby and 8yr old. I have no friends, no family and I’ve recently just recovered from DMER, Postpartum Depression, and panic disorder..... now this... I feel like I’m just utterly failing as a human being .... any words would help at this point... 

Thank you so much",2.5266295392289564,4.42274684772066,3.7302203131495086,88.49813922256212,76.643064985451,6.704516046514107,23.065848797177605,7.61054688173877,0.950513895609725,4004,121,833,56,91,1302,378,1031,0.159,0.735,0.106,-0.9957,4,1,3,0,6,0,126.0,10,1,6,10,55,55,6,7,30,2,85,15,7,17,21,187,156,95,2,12,37,20,12,4,6,6,2,5,2,8,50,64,1,5,22,5,3,14,31,28,0,5,43,18,147,27,112,89,30,118,0,11,1,5,109,43,1,21,63,601,197,4,0.04410842876962672,0.2090451017134383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0390994607539716,0.0,0.0,0.045683029799224714,0.0,0.10582048365340233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20996670874072684,0.046251533449705735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06168327793554914,0.0451942977674389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432396236925282,0.03391665907302103,0.0,0.08066426633499034,0.04871429415280341,0.0,0.0,0.046289074719923023,0.03901032081329105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04503963739177028,0.0,0.04497148280331193,0.0,0.0,0.07599101151567356,0.0,0.0,0.04947135348096216,0.14086796494812864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03799052506656568,0.0,0.045777585240063284,0.0,0.05055208074504965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04320946794002208,0.05115177387344002,0.0,0.036846932367064364,0.09923209106724863,0.0,0.0911515956905056,0.0,0.05826640241167842,0.07979719815466284,0.0,0.0,0.11892543495070496,0.0,0.12474450328311612,0.0,0.15611782827143278,0.06302214065260425,0.0,0.04831862771416078,0.0,0.07503721395728641,0.0,0.048362615476410284,0.2044683759103515,0.0,0.11522416761934473,0.0,0.02506783654891875,0.036996057341734334,0.03527753986872203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902497679847173,0.0,0.04526797319964513,0.04688519717899597,0.0,0.052268700465812,0.11825980015402535,0.0,0.044244350437391264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14165695581032392,0.049793047184506174,0.0,0.046037739905926175,0.0,0.03920559815032593,0.0,0.0,0.024240838916719718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958478738354404,0.18041542741769365,0.0,0.08619660117617438,0.0,0.07789710141491321,0.039034571449812434,0.0,0.0,0.144448681393544,0.0,0.15923831629049676,0.0,0.11777087484515375,0.0,0.0443128452748681,0.04804700975910915,0.0,0.0,0.04445092178661885,0.0,0.0,0.20663703471501624,0.0,0.09376055859424257,0.22697339228575694,0.0,0.27215311572413114,0.08520039072544451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256875231473426,0.0,0.059778025738815924,0.03354644768122438,0.0,0.0517517374692679,0.0,0.14329539006750142,0.0,0.03057923073973738,0.03851377866022899,0.0,0.0,0.08339344458284842,0.0,0.0,0.04487412932509286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868230748649683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05020504850381788,0.08477096679207494,0.04535081102361404,0.08710350425902101,0.18942378151969266,0.04996625137167675,0.0,0.08391443297693753,0.0701535858806101,0.0,0.0,0.0351487069918684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045276668276868486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03395682340971566,0.043624363902764064,0.0,0.03122017290797875,0.04701371625522988,0.10567514457781232,0.0368766214961069,0.0,0.04611170671665034,0.0,0.0,0.1001074445184862,0.12471501634068136,0.0,0.06632809814613767,0.0709053684948794,0.0,0.0406091150567727,0.0,0.0,0.08791104041258932,0.11305160054113447,0.0,0.0,0.1028799181046294,0.0,0.0,0.04214749391456677,0.098012174645252,0.119786911125081,0.04797730444718473,0.0,0.0459184299164702,0.15917102664681082,0.0,0.0,0.109182219429895,0.05203258819661798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04088895537288202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06266672453059317,0.0,0.0,0.05680876395199307
mentalhealth,bottash,2020/01/13,"I just figured out for the first time ever what my mental illness is by reading a reddit post. Now I am able to write about it after trying to for a month and I need help! I have Panic Disorder. For sure. It's the first time in my life to understand what's been wrong with me since forever. I am 21F and have been searching for an answer on whether I am sane or not. I just thought i wasnt normal. I read a post on here where a girl describes exactly what I am feeling to a T and I've never been able to deal with it or talk about it to anyone because I've just never known. Now that I understand I need advice and help. 
Have you Panic Disorder and if so is it possible to be at peace without more pain? I've gone through about 4 groups of friends, not keeping in touch with any of them after having indifferences and feeling alot of pain because of that, and my 4th serious relationship is about to end in the same way and feelings and thoughts are the exact same as they were 4 years ago. It's the same with friends. I can't hold relationships for long (1.5years is my longest boyfriend)  Can doctors actually help ? I went to counselling about 2 years ago but it didn't help so i lost hope in anybody understanding me. I have shit really bad the cycle is not stopping and won't slow down no matter what I do and it's really ruining my life. To top it off I think I have abandonment issues as i went through alot of emotional abuse as a child. I never understood what panic attacks were fully until 30 minutes ago and I really want to help myself now and I'm grateful these forums exist",2.813981481481484,4.508938114197535,4.204197530864197,86.29388888888889,75.26543209876544,7.269135802469138,26.19753086419753,8.045849151850463,1.5633753086419748,1255,46,258,20,27,415,167,324,0.131,0.72,0.149,-0.6048,0,0,0,0,1,0,21.0,0,1,2,4,16,17,2,3,15,0,28,7,1,0,7,66,48,24,0,6,12,0,4,0,2,1,6,0,0,2,17,18,0,4,13,2,0,3,12,13,0,2,14,4,33,4,50,32,6,42,0,3,0,0,18,12,1,6,24,185,50,3,0.17838513311671794,0.1056786064952397,0.08703907877855277,0.0,0.0,0.08715794376485543,0.2371914860474004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06065400380311594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062365516368072416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146942071711314,0.0,0.0,0.0744720675002357,0.10874192143700656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195361968921313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044448171149188,0.09129237128513086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032963238689874,0.07899814021438155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067978282283936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352953247660204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517343031009928,0.0,0.0,0.13781991134252114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989194863272786,0.0,0.0,0.08858834368127322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309386653063703,0.0,0.07927845130795429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599869499546926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893261467776104,0.0,0.0,0.09736422258242457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988512877528564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119265568016138,0.0,0.0,0.13227031589623198,0.20637241763136008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873897778522021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18981435872322205,0.31394477773261165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055121736516492,0.17084364732057186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843340666715132,0.0,0.17141712613043888,0.0,0.0,0.1915188741949175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155488784053346,0.07378101274762558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456897942154382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406293843058595,0.0,0.0,0.07168960644523567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715099521260664,0.0,0.14161786988194633,0.10401780565559847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060555897939291066,0.0,0.0,0.278557821996168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05260808665583543,0.0707969077617821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653648055633705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597845131809805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751806984789586,0.0,0.11487417714084056
mentalhealth,2-Dick,2020/01/13,"How to deal with isolation? 22 male. I Have one friend. I usually see him once a week because he works and has a GF, which is great but I wish I could meet him more. 

I go to a clubhouse for people with mental health issues, but most people there are 50+ so it doesn't satisfy my social needs that much (even if I like most people there) 

I was suggested mindfulness in a previous post and it has helped a bit. 

I've tried Tinder but that has been unsuccesful. I've gotten matches but most don't responde.

Been thinking about going to a bar alone and see if I can meet new people there but the thought makes me anxious. 

I've started to avoid people (even though I really want company. I crave physical contact so much that I feel like weeping.

I've tried speaking to my doctor, but she tells me It's my ADD. I don't think it is, I've tried every medicine available and nothing has worked. I've started lifting weights again and try to follow a routine, It makes me feel a little better but the problems above still remain. 

I think about suicide daily and It's agonizing. I won't go through with it but life is really hard at the moment. 

I worked hard last year to get rid of my social anxiety, I made great progress. Problem was that I still didn't know how to meet new people, and the feeling of isolation has slowly been creeping in again. I can go days without seeing or hearing from anyone.  

This got long, just needed to vent.",2.613566433566433,4.658786720279725,3.67692307692308,88.29307692307694,76.90209790209789,6.358041958041959,24.63636363636364,7.321109707123232,1.107486713286713,1126,39,225,14,26,363,156,286,0.152,0.7440000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.9336,0,4,0,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,0,5,17,10,0,1,12,0,23,5,0,5,0,49,52,23,1,9,13,0,6,2,2,1,3,2,0,1,13,11,2,1,8,1,0,5,6,4,0,1,10,11,28,6,23,40,7,25,0,1,3,0,20,4,0,6,17,139,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961150935963897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709934305222623,0.10484007316792356,0.0,0.06488945739986847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056571360982740564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207600618158413,0.10131596902877596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740950069162888,0.0,0.0,0.05984974295795952,0.09567499533510752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498698611709368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258995837045865,0.0,0.0781898577145216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14077074518219687,0.06629791165441368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169875106247424,0.0,0.04848532027745395,0.0,0.2109665201058284,0.0,0.07422239858508972,0.20462951065992455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16626508957088787,0.0,0.0,0.0986444011036427,0.10459482631710816,0.0,0.06220335981681865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686138812315456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05100166323414615,0.07564618077816386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554893976259257,0.09067693655773328,0.0930121864212449,0.0,0.08212702845854931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781168739955572,0.12389238091715578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352279230917336,0.0,0.09370376909002656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364405928623152,0.1376233137870669,0.0,0.17925788996517147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089046215712066,0.0,0.0,0.09883131639803294,0.06288517381777503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3860241718957095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887885662181233,0.0,0.0,0.17759834821336912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890293387990952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218540195667698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892003161724053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313717524574858,0.0,0.14822391679576996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151054658548984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111321497412442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783917115664449,0.09117769228641352,0.0736745822846195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25202641385674845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220851451106122,0.0,0.05473714316410352,0.0,0.07444032870507564,0.1130080809820893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671795237627417,0.08945801107755383,0.0,0.2026833249834083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059761575450865675
mentalhealth,DonnieIsMad,2020/01/13,I moved to a secondary school with none of my old friends So I moved to a secondary 4to5 months ago and I haven't been diagnosed with depression but I have spent days where I spent most the time thinking about commiting or being in dark places. But ever since I've moved my class likes me but I have no best friends and the only people who will be my best friend are not suited to my personality at all. So I do have people to be with just not my type of people. And it's only today where I had off school because of a storm and there has been this girl I was snapping the last 3 weeks a lot and I just found out she's going out with my best friend from my old school. I just don't no what to do besides being by myself idk who to talk to,2.4057547169811317,3.4516870125786165,3.455487421383648,93.88813679245285,75.10062893081759,6.306289308176101,20.797169811320764,6.42735559955562,-0.011486792452829686,581,12,137,4,12,187,88,159,0.055999999999999994,0.735,0.209,0.9853,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,10,9,0,0,7,0,18,1,0,0,3,27,23,11,0,0,9,0,0,1,4,1,1,0,0,2,5,11,0,0,2,0,2,4,7,1,0,0,7,0,21,8,22,11,7,22,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,3,11,102,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139864114892203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660710647251834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39564791363394136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104658525949338,0.0,0.10823916205850988,0.1275521397618794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367547365749492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779038233750282,0.3883685144690302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142100873626951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243761020492656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061395886653667235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10683991810884293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10030838671378167,0.400701133187683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637385023184768,0.0,0.0,0.19115499881579354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613707211887881,0.10972996879053012,0.1312981298187369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3815534551777591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395530673939464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010085759263422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08052409443213282,0.0,0.0,0.07327903542252792,0.0,0.1191202183989412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008046843472411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,michael_gr,2020/01/13,"i feel like i’m going insane lately i’ve been struggling with keeping a grip on reality. More than often i drift into this anxious state where everything becomes terrifying, as if i could see the real nature of reality and everything is just so disgustingly evil and sick. Whether i’m at university, in the train or just walking on the street it doesn’t matter. It makes me feel extremely paranoid, dizzy even, i feel like i’m really going insane. Sometimes i get so deep in this state that i can’t focus on what’s important but i can’t get rid of it. Do you have any idea what it might be? I probably need therapy but i’m too broke at this moment",3.210398601398605,5.079372053846157,5.176013986013988,79.0026223776224,74.61538461538461,8.419580419580418,26.433566433566433,9.095868883498916,2.292538461538462,517,19,99,12,11,178,86,130,0.192,0.7609999999999999,0.047,-0.9481,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,8,6,2,1,4,0,10,1,0,1,0,23,25,10,0,3,7,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,10,4,0,1,4,0,0,4,3,4,0,0,1,5,10,2,13,21,1,19,0,1,1,0,1,11,0,4,4,63,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018988316854013,0.0,0.0,0.2162795505319208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21143712789992625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15285409775369674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12644831453723987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441187415662541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904026349474561,0.2735382015778419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20004532542070635,0.0,0.21760641120828636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21611929453506454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17016605114920935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21595949017618654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18706174547308813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779172910425907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20309401163936924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141954824854544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20641122867316408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21790752481041248,0.12264524584642113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525577201723455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18934504482665976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20014098531634392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21893524993298585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ViksterGRAM,2020/01/13,"I don’t know what to do anymore. I feel trapped. I don’t want to make this long. To make things short, I have been dealing with extreme paranoia for about 3 months now. Every single noise drives me crazy. Every single time I arrive to my apartment, I make sure to check every single room. I am awaken by the most random noise every night. I often think that someone is throwing rocks at my window every morning at 4am to be exact. That’s when I wake up daily. Every time I see the same colored car twice, I think it’s following me. Or if I see someone looking at me too long, I feel extremely paranoid, almost frozen. Right now, my car alarm went off for no reason.. and I don’t know why I feel like someone is stalking me. I hate it. I hate living like this. I was never like this. I just want this to go away. Maybe I’m going insane? I don’t know. But sometimes I’m just too scared to even get up in the morning.",0.8461578947368409,2.9639805105263197,2.5234210526315834,93.89144736842108,83.36842105263158,4.2210526315789485,19.5,4.935628992294339,-0.3674947368421053,707,19,150,2,20,232,106,190,0.15,0.782,0.067,-0.9459,0,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,0,10,8,2,2,3,0,12,1,1,4,3,29,37,5,0,3,5,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,10,2,0,0,9,1,1,8,6,4,0,1,3,7,27,4,21,33,5,30,0,0,4,0,1,12,0,6,13,94,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564178790183245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453032810271604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850218625759324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906021340500901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627691307313914,0.0,0.5838077825658733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17517842466436392,0.08250267985102751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033627238783487,0.0,0.1312658486009626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280355346822395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19040300615848527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692607673456761,0.0,0.10197558433921644,0.20440160985314648,0.09697851745066673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312618870727848,0.0,0.11602044770751488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217921824934604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906933795226375,0.0,0.0,0.1083750762892196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873806265928755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986237655372806,0.0,0.0,0.1156208736528613,0.0,0.18405357165587555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935508119613024,0.0,0.11421785713734682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884347372974353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672326315191992,0.14799655977261775,0.0,0.0,0.13468074645819614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623237552241205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705597618993083,0.10420746818723313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,smollbeanthrowaway,2020/01/13,"amnesia keeps getting worse and its effecting my daily life now.i dont know what to do. i have something called transient global amnesia which is basically i have short sudden periods of time where i just forget almost everything for a short period of time from minutes to hours,it wasnt that bad at first but is now getting worse sometimes i forget everything for a whole day and seem distant but its not because i want to be distant its just me trying to remember everything again,it happened recently for almost a whole week where i just consistantly kept losing it and i ended up hurting my gf because she thought i was preping for a break up,i dont know what to do im in the midst of studying too so it cripples my education.

i dont know what im actually saying this for maybe somebody else expriences this too?im in my mid to late teens so im worried for the future

foot note: my gf is very understanding and i have told her i have this but still,i just dont want to keep doing this to people.",5.196507692307693,5.913023820000002,6.162999999999999,78.2786153846154,68.3,9.153846153846157,31.884615384615394,9.265573868473778,2.7870576923076933,804,33,153,15,13,267,108,200,0.122,0.868,0.01,-0.9578,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,10,3,0,0,6,0,17,2,1,1,0,29,32,9,0,2,8,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,14,4,0,3,8,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,5,1,19,0,22,26,2,24,0,2,0,0,7,10,0,3,13,99,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0999102877412746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050420286799916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548488560599965,0.12482251435532772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454370392855704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602806852933757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4799648445904803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552721582882472,0.0,0.09068026719268607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27604364024771505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870862726018275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069809790894299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905362679349142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960229481747694,0.0,0.4423615094498106,0.0,0.0,0.18200406054417206,0.0,0.0,0.1687997883716831,0.0,0.1154916149833269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231559690590594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453952709636255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028567112197544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07097894721066897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109010071713838,0.0,0.11597910845469875,0.0,0.0,0.08141845867934545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320493705479704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881884265676316,0.10125864345336688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176258119230861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812800544753589,0.11939980338840188,0.0,0.0,0.09783060833301127,0.0,0.06951081367644993,0.0,0.0,0.10658351221381747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447606214836988,0.12077538386349684,0.0,0.08212484936715131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286122072023311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039741243952866,0.2086724784149228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jonathanbcoon1,2020/01/13,"How can I get rid of the hot ball of lead in my stomach? It’s not a literal ball of lead, but it’s a constant feeling of dread or anxiety that’s in the pit of my stomach and never leaves. Does anyone have advice on how to get rid of it?",-0.155555555555555,1.2769086296296308,2.8257037037037063,94.03966666666668,83.07407407407408,5.801481481481483,21.91111111111111,6.742157984588678,0.3635377777777782,182,6,45,2,5,65,35,54,0.121,0.847,0.033,-0.6868,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,4,0,2,2,2,4,1,10,5,5,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,2,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,10,5,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,30,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36865403133945374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886028091359157,0.0,0.0,0.2637889104828484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4076839536335663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301427016668788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19075395288863295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3942054787601741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3994637873195099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29096611060615635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrBumpity20,2020/01/13,"Any advice for a student who is feeling very down. I am currently in my first year of University and to be frank things are shit. Now don’t get me wrong, in terms of actual studying there’s not really an issue... the problem lies in the social aspects.

I have no real friends here, spend most my time in my bedroom and constantly homesick. When I first came I thought I’d make all these new friends.... but when you are already a very shy person making new friends in a matter of weeks in a whole new environment is nowhere near as easy as some people make it out to be. 

Then freshers went by and everyone else appeared to have formed strong friendships... but not me. And if you think making new friends is difficult for a shy person, trying to join other already existent friendship groups is even harder.

I often sit by and jealously watch other people having fun.. and really want to get involved. But can’t. Sometimes people have this odd idea that if your shy then that always means that you prefer to be alone. No! I prefer to be with people, but internal self doubt stops me.

So you keep telling yourself that, ‘oh tomorrow I’m going to do things differently’ ... but when tomorrow comes you just can’t. And the days turn into weeks and the weeks turn into months and before you know it you are lying in bed thinking why the hell am I doing this.

All the people I love are not at university but back home. And I’m now feeling down and as if I have no one to turn to. I know some of you may reply with join a few societies... But for people like myself walking into a room with strangers and joining a club Late on is absolutely terrifying. So it WILL NOT happen. I’d love it to happen but I won’t allow myself to let it happen.

There’s lots more I could talk about...",3.7784930489228468,5.3116787478510075,4.6998217128303095,84.38968375252044,72.40974212034385,7.348020800169798,25.533375782659448,7.921354282810032,1.4263007747002017,1389,44,272,19,27,451,181,349,0.161,0.7190000000000001,0.12,-0.935,2,1,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,9,0,3,15,17,3,1,15,0,30,3,1,5,2,70,61,33,0,8,16,0,2,1,4,3,0,0,5,3,17,21,0,2,11,1,1,6,11,8,0,3,3,3,29,9,44,49,11,52,1,1,1,2,24,17,2,11,29,194,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.08391190698892831,0.0,0.0,0.08402650135062009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905765968783219,0.189779844262008,0.0,0.07154892388714874,0.0,0.0,0.058474804617156526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661194823274308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731694746590241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834739138320553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407106832274779,0.0,0.0929225055701998,0.0,0.06865443983468464,0.0,0.0,0.05545516152891099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983918291226345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183195987018963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056794278532086385,0.0,0.0,0.0821652413650149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695625663875639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462827376796378,0.0,0.0,0.26573653453339713,0.0,0.08985038648055245,0.0,0.04886897533494365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281167755342397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625299857911901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707001200373927,0.0,0.08974915611679693,0.0,0.07643010617454463,0.0,0.0,0.0945135378402341,0.0,0.09699823585312807,0.0,0.0,0.08792857986880083,0.0,0.042009404846467806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310394259661301,0.1552150967633841,0.0,0.2295906935068475,0.0,0.0,0.09366616581585213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863481996319712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3321910755851725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05826771009339109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3576796114492537,0.15016285076929714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227892552820366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787319588728333,0.11017225937300182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970426177427418,0.0,0.08826547041476338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765396120440982,0.0,0.0,0.08504435392366308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718898379129184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911391609980819,0.07515732259166095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425324391831405,0.11019530679560978,0.0,0.06826488568277574,0.05014030798494468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05838022353661355,0.28059083237093496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14189824952043534,0.05071796411771884,0.0,0.20692321713920725,0.0,0.0,0.07971175923736312,0.07759081660363372,0.096002557399155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401440504254052,0.0,0.05537346788904148
mentalhealth,Brandi_Vezina,2020/01/13,Ways to Take Care of Your Mental Health \#mentalhealth #anxietytips,10.416999999999998,14.755618700000007,7.190000000000001,61.32500000000002,62.0,12.0,30.0,11.20814326018867,4.972,57,2,7,2,1,16,10,10,0.0,0.738,0.262,0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4871490471840064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5078791649516189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4815101225260786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592462133696716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3792554808044759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,district7official,2020/01/13,"Mental Fog and disassociation after weekend in vegas... body is fine but mind is going crazy  I have been feeling the effects of a long weekend without sleep and partying for about 4 months now. It all started after a weekend in Las Vegas, after we had left our bags and were walking around the strip, I took a hit of a marijuana vape pen (I am a frequent smoker of flower and previous cartridge user) about 10-15 mins later my hearing went haywire; almost like it was echoing, and then I began to feel as if I was falling through the floor. The feeling lasted about 5 mins and had to sit down to try to stay calm, like i stated i don’t think I was overwhelmed being high, bc i love smoking. For the next few days I was having auditory and visual hallucinations and episodes of microsleeps while being awake, it was terrifying. When i came back home i ended up in the ER after not being able to feel my arms and having a microsleep episode on public transport where i thought everyone was going to kill me, sounds funny but was the scariest thing of my life. They ran regular tests and everything seemed to be normal with blood pressure, blood sugar and oxygen saturation. 

 This feeling has been persistent in disorientation and some what of what I would describe as slight dizziness or the feeling after you eat a huge meal and your focus just isnt there, I haven’t felt the same since. Another way i would describe it is if you just shook your head around a ton. Obviously throughout the weekend I was drinking heavily, partaking in Vegas activities as one does, and sleeping a total of maybe 4 hours throughout 4 days. It feels as if my reality has been altered in a sense which sparks mini panic attacks frequently. Has anyone else experienced this? Any advice would help Have tried alot of natural remedies but next I am resorting to having some tests done.",8.362442528735627,7.7933551867816115,8.29367816091954,70.03580459770116,61.78735632183909,10.377011494252876,37.14942528735632,9.586721724236666,3.5792287356321832,1487,62,252,23,18,482,208,348,0.08900000000000001,0.8059999999999999,0.105,0.1518,1,0,2,0,0,1,30.0,2,4,1,2,12,11,2,4,21,0,38,13,7,1,3,56,60,28,1,7,11,0,8,2,0,3,1,2,1,0,11,19,4,0,12,5,0,10,5,6,1,1,22,12,30,5,44,30,8,60,0,1,0,1,11,16,0,10,32,183,41,3,0.11268936278488645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011874109571797,0.0,0.0,0.11284211888433505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663263097662977,0.11816462244649815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879502261738468,0.11546356918589927,0.0,0.20063484882171928,0.0,0.12820041853242767,0.0,0.08665116408233649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517247805566226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888661023712286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453506328757386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861522077326904,0.11532034304002325,0.0,0.11039267424071236,0.0,0.11530935105919934,0.09413750262357007,0.0,0.09980932745247326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076795153375082,0.10127793301899728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3988538943237667,0.0,0.1081994603254387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808792359607085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565179709924403,0.0,0.12700910187198866,0.0,0.0755333044848897,0.11906249885757675,0.11303661900226485,0.0,0.11097632279959822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467408360334176,0.0,0.0,0.09185687111857828,0.0,0.0,0.12243732239040457,0.0,0.0795958295553499,0.11010866099423162,0.0,0.0,0.09972653993718104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170654959982912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321161139724747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356437286617263,0.0,0.1137841322864537,0.0,0.08994757425566358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396928315093483,0.0,0.11041164931198524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636122864667069,0.0,0.0,0.1322166869484679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258816356288504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321780539540156,0.0,0.2255414913899802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976211098810977,0.12011186693187093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486580533615117,0.07220679347551706,0.0,0.08946276652722836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520202843339598,0.15301736041378194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944757092056024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446416828800424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086285243953418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24015387031984,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Du3s,2020/01/13,"I don't know if I want grov up. I have social anxiety and light to medium depression, and currently I'm  doing something that my country requires me to do in school, that is trying out working for 2 weeks, and I discovered that I can't do that.

I discovered that not being with my friends in school makes me really really depressed or something similar.
I feel like I need to be with friends at least daily I feel like shit. And because I have my anxiety I have a hard time talking with people I don't know.

And because of what I've been through today and what I've figured will happen when I have to get work, and I don't think I can do that, I think life won't be worth it.

The thing people might think now is ""Don't you have anything that you want to do? Or some hobbies that you could devote yourself to?"".
The answer is: No. I don't have any sort of hobbies, except maybe reading, and I don't think watching YouTube videos is a hobby. I also don't have anything that I want to do, or any goals.

I'm also afraid that when I change school I will lose all my friends as I know that I don't want to irritate or disturb my friends lives, so I don't usually ask my friends to hang out with me. And as I don't ask them to hang out moving to a different school where I don't know most of the people makes me stressed, anxious and a bit depressed.

I don't know when you switch high school, but in 
 country when your 15 to 16 you need to switch school to get a higher education.

Because of everything that I've written I don't think that l will want to live, in the future. I'm ok with living right now, probably in the future I'll probably not. 

I just wanted to share this with someone, before I think I'll get more depressed.

If you want to maybe help or something I live in Sweden.",4.2941339410939685,4.387704072580647,5.182342215988778,86.71525245441795,70.1021505376344,8.189995324918186,29.07713884992988,7.893859768569023,1.6540363253856951,1393,48,305,16,23,456,148,372,0.106,0.8170000000000001,0.077,-0.4148,2,0,3,0,0,0,36.0,0,7,1,5,11,19,1,3,10,1,42,2,1,2,1,64,76,27,0,12,12,0,3,2,5,5,1,0,0,0,18,19,0,1,15,2,1,3,18,9,0,0,2,5,50,10,43,65,6,30,0,5,1,0,19,14,1,11,15,200,68,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163756567667052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989614518525212,0.0,0.1113256209993603,0.08220046675570579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119754023929412,0.0,0.1360454903962181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330653099699348,0.0,0.06191519143117225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943737248859613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697265825726762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05809461944032347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506795746661517,0.0,0.0,0.07602091218987413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539388746315461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358141220797652,0.10396252345593984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.281079105777453,0.0,0.11404558878615872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06434328838031038,0.0,0.06518055336538879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04877090463801778,0.0768771579285084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999407476780935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051394025977037266,0.07109577744270115,0.0,0.25700108403610666,0.0,0.0,0.0814021826943845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713853902556947,0.0,0.14619862697721736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718909398038977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733460154763218,0.0,0.10790435649204648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15133224419820665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156899709647294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278179458725813,0.0,0.09322653416977736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621384393603728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4418348037684264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746892542683924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417180201118538,0.06165109470614165,0.16804746777873336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334874444173049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05848342311898563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04833990883356973,0.279738109923363,0.0,0.0,0.04242816805468083,0.0,0.06896996686431288,0.0,0.0,0.049400692473309415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013717794492227,0.0,0.3004188195127926,0.0,0.058365370989435124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594335679607922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ogukuliee,2020/01/13,"It's been 7 months That I'm down. Almost 8 months now. And I can't really see the sunshine, or appreciate the wind on my skin. Nor the smiles of my friends. I don't want to end my life, I never wanted that. But it's hard for me to keep going, to smile, and to see colors other than grey. But I keep going anyway.",-0.2553416149068326,1.478813072463769,2.4484886128364387,95.06478260869568,84.94202898550725,5.102277432712215,14.204968944099381,6.1826913282559595,-0.8507987577639748,238,3,58,2,7,83,48,69,0.076,0.7340000000000001,0.19,0.8311,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,3,2,1,0,1,11,12,6,0,2,3,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,7,8,2,9,11,0,9,0,0,5,0,1,2,0,2,5,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533423705276395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22408238933812888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19546672205315413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875707982145713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22663778356458025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4497550130649486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17870097037379934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4038834419353341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951287473807415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207790500951294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4032155589548734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984512223795578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gsbb64,2020/01/13,Help. So my sister uh. Got scared today. Like seriously. She cried for 2 hours straight. Jumping on my parents for a hug. Then being jumpscared. I think it was the computer. I personally watch avengers movies and star wars. She might have got scared of that. She is six. So she calmed down. What do we do to help her? What do I do?,-0.7758021978021965,0.7127403538461579,0.5622527472527494,99.30096153846156,114.69230769230772,3.703296703296704,16.950549450549453,5.773587663045528,-0.4265604395604399,253,8,56,3,14,79,50,65,0.174,0.622,0.205,0.3481,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,0,2,7,1,2,2,0,9,1,0,0,0,4,12,4,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,1,3,1,11,3,6,7,0,7,0,0,1,1,11,3,0,1,4,37,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816539933200337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4101484890025418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437320071312642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525118849234515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526881785522365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720101503083533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28471260551026323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238870423228793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5134216412585149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16429696952300893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430463953662947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suvensram,2020/01/13,"What is “wrong” with me? Hello,

I am a mainly stay at home/work from home mother and I struggle constantly with my mental health. It has always been an issue. Before children I mistakenly saw a child psychiatrist but because I was under 23, she took me on. I told her I had been diagnosed with ADD at age 17 but I didn’t follow a treatment plan nor did I take medication and I also told her I wondered if I had bipolar disorder because I was always either very ecstatic or down and engaging in dangerous/impulsive behavior. She prescribed me adderall and Wellbutrin and wrote down I had bipolar and ADD. I didn’t stick with that either but now finally in my 30’s, I am seeing a psychiatrist and on Ritalin. It helps me to get a lot done but I kind of go into autopilot and I’m not much of a person or a warm and loving wife/mother. It also makes my anxiety even worse. All last week I had panic attacks and got only the bare minimum done. My house and life are disorganized messes. I always try to be the best mom I can be and be productive and organized for my kids but I never achieve it consistently. I’ve accepted that it will always be a struggle. I very much dislike the ups and downs though and I struggle with low self esteem as a result of all of this. Going back to last week, a fuse burned out in me. I don’t care about anything. I never used to think “I don’t want to mom today or I don’t feel like doing the kids laundry, what’s the point, what’s the point of anything.” but since last week that is where I am. This morning I woke up early and got the kids to school on time so that’s a small victory for this week but as the phone starts to ring and responsibilities pile up again, I feel incapable, overwhelmed, burnt out and anxious. My husband is a sweet man but he is a very simple blue collar man who is not equipped to even understand how I can feel the way I do so I’m meeting with a counselor this Wednesday even though we can really afford it. I need help. I feel like a mess, kind of pathetic.

Anyway, thanks for “listening”. I don’t really know what I’m looking for in posting this.",1.980236494187373,4.073764278037384,3.9204718486437216,85.54780145885572,79.11682242990653,6.97934807385457,23.756781399589705,8.015777009494485,1.394563756553454,1653,57,335,30,41,560,212,428,0.121,0.758,0.121,0.41600000000000004,1,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,1,0,0,3,16,22,1,5,25,0,37,8,0,4,4,67,72,40,0,3,16,4,5,2,0,1,7,2,1,9,20,30,0,0,9,0,0,4,11,10,0,0,21,12,50,12,47,46,9,51,0,2,4,1,30,24,0,6,22,238,70,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335324234575518,0.2778785133761836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638689412286716,0.09431893095336454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740884888104055,0.0,0.0,0.0949809163941732,0.0,0.06419797271629339,0.0,0.10178837402989284,0.0,0.07104308401211999,0.0,0.08761667089716076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512271270004894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022206870561723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473969001200249,0.0,0.0,0.09568575411379658,0.0,0.0,0.17087669426073288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16543131080134665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688584119143936,0.11928927484949706,0.0,0.09145823994645397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043619614497752056,0.0,0.09489757132972496,0.0,0.13354773753595675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874502063469655,0.0,0.0,0.11192198216482813,0.0,0.16749277080118774,0.0,0.0,0.09633522438012478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714094050470418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388212245839169,0.045883431857046415,0.20416430529211965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05897082801183884,0.08157712466065091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701098257872241,0.0,0.0,0.07097945638820917,0.07535218211349054,0.0,0.055729629750718115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410649561317816,0.08413738682007713,0.0,0.0,0.1955628749908707,0.0,0.0,0.12274820561031576,0.06190611775835274,0.12878389835136975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634972309133153,0.0,0.09795648276912997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289947120993105,0.0,0.0,0.15784839150935168,0.0,0.07995948960756277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069705244559376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844954373825274,0.06653001192183665,0.0,0.08709735084436594,0.0,0.0,0.06906305519173782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059094022327767476,0.08898828351421025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618428380570059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277342096021041,0.0,0.0,0.07686555609250048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053496451046722994,0.16405525489237274,0.0,0.048683171898770417,0.0,0.0791379148960784,0.15955484639935025,0.09275947404185192,0.05668362585197901,0.0,0.0,0.08691510872594951,0.0,0.0721077856182765,0.0,0.2066617802471081,0.04924404066763932,0.06626977004071663,0.26787971473594685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905403792363188,0.06078106699998422,0.0,0.08508253656138721,0.0,0.09128223630020203,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,txtintx,2020/01/13,Resources for transgender teenager? I'm a clinician with a transgender 17 y/o client. Looking for resources/information that could be helpful for the transition process & the toll it can take on mental health. Thanks!,6.108513513513511,9.605251675675678,5.239121621621624,73.97597972972977,72.7837837837838,9.105405405405406,38.979729729729726,9.516144504307137,4.844572972972973,180,11,26,5,4,54,31,37,0.0,0.8340000000000001,0.166,0.7177,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,5,5,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,14,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4241914600750656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31258190557639765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4161475402283901,0.0,0.0,0.2624150473022099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3287624628236025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.394541195844068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.294360230438659,0.0,0.0,0.36044176752014107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wee_Doosey,2020/01/13,"I want to disappear. Diagnosed with anxiety and depression at the age of 18.
Healing isn't linear. It's messy and 10 year later I find myself in a situation now where I'm unable to work and medication has been changed. Im seeing my Dr on Friday. My memory is shocking, I find it hard to concentrate. I have very little motivation for anything. My anxiety seems to have calmed down dramatically but my depression seems to have made a very drastic appearance. I don't want to speak to anybody, I just want to sleep and be alone.  I feel like a big fat failure. I'm struggling to do uni work, I don't want to go back to work. I have counselling starting this week.  I'm scared of not getting better.",1.907608695652172,4.374768456521739,3.9878550724637662,82.85786956521741,81.82608695652175,7.448115942028986,25.86666666666667,8.447377352677275,2.1122979710144927,549,23,107,13,15,187,86,138,0.22399999999999998,0.6809999999999999,0.096,-0.9657,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,5,4,8,0,2,4,0,12,6,2,2,0,20,28,5,0,4,3,0,2,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,5,1,0,6,0,0,3,4,5,0,0,2,4,14,3,19,25,0,17,0,2,1,0,1,7,0,3,8,62,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732957174727458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23241648325996045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250063051436426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168069077403284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13434916848231973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069719062629526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616741081073531,0.15418214523562132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680861290132708,0.10852220663830624,0.0,0.0,0.2776800198217398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936500282998017,0.0,0.08633210201261644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360786030576815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16408534838707287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421396089926313,0.1522504625379858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373783196832454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530300608847335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208514880866678,0.0,0.12105000571995644,0.2765803848902319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707495423380477,0.15201644695374486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752037365025036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15880590893710042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506779417625793,0.35839412814143656,0.0,0.12185042533565008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3317697515216392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782296121054083
mentalhealth,brock4822,2020/01/13,"Why do I feel like I am becoming less focused while driving? So I'm 24.  I have never gotten into a crash or received a ticket.  Super clean driving record.  Now I'm noticing that I am making small bad driving decisions.  I don't even use my phone much, if at all.  I honestly almost got myself Tboned while in a parking lot (there was 15 ish feet of space between me and the other driver but still). 

What's going on with me?  I don't understand. 

Any advice would be great.  It is mildly upsetting to me.",1.2547704770477033,3.564761425742578,3.4126912691269133,86.9491179117912,83.25742574257426,5.652925292529253,22.05310531053105,6.980632752743323,0.8593089108910892,388,13,75,5,11,132,81,101,0.064,0.764,0.172,0.8378,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,4,0,10,1,1,2,2,16,19,7,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,3,1,0,5,3,2,0,0,3,1,12,4,8,14,4,16,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,4,6,54,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494794304897154,0.0,0.0,0.2556493769761355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736149990705038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21316759190046575,0.0,0.28196243725246833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686254221645588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290890197440928,0.1823887288968708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509474914711198,0.0,0.20418937181877567,0.28147279011289683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472829676171368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21704973636179212,0.0,0.0,0.17041693555352466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876773014496335,0.0,0.19690564430310287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906644997703386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20388554557657967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657797395861376,0.0,0.22050008064980645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303715188227773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18136013967327744,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fraisechocolat,2020/01/13,"Used to be very emotionless and now I'm over-emotional. What gives? I used to never cry and now find myself crying over everything! I mean cry-baby crying. Sappy movies, negative events, memories, someones treats me badly, over everything! I don't know what happened? Am I detoxing from my trauma? Why have I drastically changed?",3.4712068965517235,6.678898103448278,4.327155172413793,76.95211206896555,85.20689655172414,7.727586206896553,26.21551724137931,8.472884824447931,2.8772,262,11,40,7,8,84,43,58,0.303,0.657,0.04,-0.9501,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,1,8,11,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,8,1,5,10,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,25,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16071882107306912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20362599713020108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6343146465430877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165222583066563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34599027349163297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17592986753211956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18465131846906688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17021584744138307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105785963573801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20967505463276165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484580406096835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309382991227606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3324943786492727,0.0,0.1588221475777286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368981177634732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helpwanted_ND81,2020/01/13,"Have been dealing with this for almost a decade now and just need some help Throwaway for obvious reasons, but I’ve been dealing with this for almost a decade now and just need some help. I know that posting this won’t solve anything, but I’m hoping to at least maybe have a better understanding of what went wrong and how to get this individual some help.

I will attempt to be brief in my summary of what happened and put what I feel are potential symptoms or issues related  to the overall problem in point-form to make this information more readable.

Just under a decade ago my former spouse and I started having problems.  It was out of nowhere but coincided with the birth of our second child and the beginning of my spouse’s use of social media (specifically Facebook). She would become irrationally hateful towards me and distant and whenever I attempted to talk to her about it, she would either be hostile or completely ignore me.  This went on for a few years and then I eventually learned (by complete accident) that she had cheated on me when our youngest was only 3 years old.  I was devastated and could not picture a world where I was only going to see my children every other week at most.  

We tried to fix things after this, but my former spouse showed little to no desire to truly fix things. My offers of marriage counseling were rebuked, and nothing really changed. The ignoring and distancing and general irrational hatred towards me remained. 

She eventually told me she was leaving and taking my children to live at her parents (an hour and a half away), but my children did not want to go with her. So, we remained (and continue) living in the same home.  I have been sleeping on a couch for about two years now and every day is an absolute struggle mentally and emotionally for me.  I have done a lot of thinking about and observing of my former spouses’ behavior over this time and retrospectively.  The strange thing is, it has really brought about in me an interest in psychology. 

My summary above is very mild and doesn’t truly present the scope of the mental abuse I have been through. And at end of the day I still do not know what happened and if it was my fault. I have never been given a reason or an answer. It was literally as if someone flicked a switch and my former spouse became a completely different person.

I am going to list my observations of habits, actions, and just general thoughts below and I really hope someone can help me understand what happened and what kind of help (if any) my former spouse could get, because at the end of the day she is still the mother of my children and I want to be comfortable with them being with her and want her to be happy:

· First and foremost, she became a Facebook addict.  She often spends double-digit hours per day on her phone.

· Quit her job after our second child was born even before returning to work. She told me she would start looking for a new job in the spring, as I did not feel I could be the sole breadwinner in the family…that was eight years ago. It has been a major financial struggle, but I have done my best.

· When she cheated, she did so with someone she met once in real life, who was also in a long-term relationship.  This did not matter to her.

· Sent nude and pornographic images of herself to this individual after only days of knowing him.

· To this day she continues to send every new guy that shows any passing interest in her, nudes and pornographic images, almost immediately.  If I had to estimate, she has likely sent multiple hundreds (possibly a thousand). She believes that these men can be trusted and would never share or post these images.  I very much disagree and am afraid of what will happen if friends of our children or family members ever see these images in the future.  This occurs multiple times per week, every week. Sometimes multiple times per day. Actually, the last time was just hours ago.

· Once, while I was washing dishes, she made a slapping sound against the wall with her hand and shouted to our children that I had hit her. This above all other things made me realize something was very wrong with her. It only happened once and I know my children did not believe her, but even after all these years, this still scares me. 

· She tends to gravitate to the youngest members of her extended family when it comes to texting and chatting.  She always wants to chat with the teens in her family even though she is 40.

· Spends a great deal of time watching daytime talk shows and reality shows, and little else.

· One especially weird habit is the making of mouth sounds or humming/singing and dancing when she thinks she has been cocky towards me or seemingly wants to appear “tough”. This one really confounds me.  She will also do this whenever I enter a room she is currently occupying.

· Does not take ownership and or responsibility for any of her failures.  It’s always someone else’s fault.

· Her emotions have always tended to be extreme or exaggerated – she will be the loudest crier at a funeral and the loudest to laugh at any joke.  It’s almost as if she does not have these emotions and is trying to mimic them.

· Was coddled by her family her whole life, even as an adult. They are afraid to call her out on anything or talk to her about some of the awful things she has done, and they have always been afraid to give her bad news. They do not at all support what she has done to me and our family, but they do not call her on it at all either.  They are good people, but almost seem afraid of her.

· She would by definition be considered a pathological liar.

· She constantly talks back to the TV and has very forced and exaggerated laughter when she considers something humorous on TV.  It’s as if she wants us to hear her laughing.

· Another very weird one – her steps and actions are very loud.  She does not walk, she stomps.  She doesn’t close a cabinet door, she slams it shut, she doesn’t push a light switch up, she slams it up.

· All of her opinions and thoughts seem to be a regurgitation of what she hears someone else say or reads on social media, but claims them as her own.

· Has become very short tempered with our children over the years.  But I would not consider her to be a bad mother.

· Has occasional times where she asks very kind towards me, as if we are friends and nothing wrong has ever happened. This can last days or even a week. But things always return to the way they were.

· Seems very into her looks now and whenever there is a new man paying attention to her she starts working out briefly.

· Her friends help her sneak around.  She will tell our children she is staying the weekend at her friend’s house to help them with something, but is actually off with one of her men in a motel.

· Is obsessed with her immediate and extended family and hometown.  If anyone mentions someone who has done something well, her family or someone in her hometown has (or could) do it better.

· When she sees parents of our children’s schoolmates, she acts like she is best friends with them, even though she rarely interacts with them outside of school functions.

· There is a constant need to be the center of attention, especially when around friends or family.  Always needs to be part of every story.

· Was not popular in school.

· Society would likely consider her to be of average looks and just below average intelligence.  I do not say this to be rude.

· Loves to watch horrific news. If there is breaking new about some tragedy, she will be glued to the TV. 

I could go on and on, but I suspect no one really wants to read much more of this. I’m just hoping someone can tell me what, if any, disorder this could be. And what could cause someone to become like this, seemingly overnight.  

I apologize for any spelling or grammar errors.  As I want to write this and post it quickly before I decide against it.  As you can imaging, my life is a living hell and I exist solely to care for my children and try to ensure they have a good life and are well taken care of, despite our situation. 

The amount of people that know fully about my situation are in the single digits because I do not want to burden others. I just want to know that I didn’t cause this and that I am not imagining things, and that I’m not really the one with the disorder. 

I have zero desire to ever get back together with my ex, but I do want her to get help and have a better and more meaningful life, for her and for our children.

Thank you for reading this.",7.000675315128909,7.151814902316848,6.999427935531298,75.79789009964337,64.34752661239824,9.949113827557106,33.51398682311944,9.653516015845867,3.0868228798562525,6697,258,1216,120,92,2141,534,1597,0.107,0.78,0.113,0.9681,7,0,4,0,1,0,157.0,15,2,13,11,59,72,8,8,72,1,146,16,5,10,11,274,242,132,1,47,69,11,3,4,6,14,9,8,4,20,78,94,1,2,31,16,3,23,26,31,2,14,53,20,197,41,205,149,30,185,1,0,8,3,206,66,1,50,94,919,275,11,0.0,0.036149853613566686,0.059547529265464215,0.03326085671994068,0.0,0.0,0.08113692811973354,0.0,0.15275887097695626,0.0,0.0,0.04879833697171845,0.15232266046502618,0.0,0.0,0.12448877391233155,0.031992831210210806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021333592124361228,0.0,0.050214945082042085,0.054321477277564416,0.028523120162260086,0.0,0.028665539978180707,0.04692125289715472,0.05094984553102423,0.037197732558886726,0.10108907148234983,0.05192423328159815,0.06874958115934929,0.06403759806155165,0.0809519500965044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06230909158551039,0.0,0.062214804625398225,0.06268520299870188,0.03227597437131452,0.02628202162808072,0.09596877141929824,0.06594184089502128,0.0,0.1705205904842292,0.0,0.0,0.15741355297762835,0.09436469692148257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03187689069180172,0.06993515959249179,0.0,0.08009961139727831,0.1561137417272901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646261214984929,0.10296033352936168,0.05404634484128151,0.0,0.0,0.12091105128071647,0.08279525351476047,0.1285317060415753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301000372108363,0.0,0.030853965919847192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025952144086535282,0.0,0.0,0.14143362933985984,0.0,0.06376173192166777,0.02926837096702473,0.06935908962990835,0.05118137841913725,0.0,0.03363784112205651,0.0,0.030210108474949374,0.16188155953672667,0.03247890494960203,0.0,0.03012271900383985,0.0,0.0,0.06877491205442297,0.0,0.16360390858803267,0.0,0.030604434706756323,0.09091118142508677,0.09013984110002883,0.035204923417283894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03184494723210639,0.06055375967860824,0.0,0.0,0.06354380595645767,0.1006063596183046,0.04974012208307705,0.0,0.032306124967604,0.0,0.0,0.10775204487087514,0.05962339206162581,0.061158903995085986,0.08082376836354972,0.02700075786924441,0.07686319506245624,0.0,0.0,0.025938864443677843,0.027536841458563777,0.057739386267015684,0.04073187891702041,0.0,0.03065181354180728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06149464598418097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04485733236130535,0.09049234685516776,0.047063027132727926,0.11786859877790708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585511336460321,0.0,0.03201554896947905,0.097477791199111,0.12404788413909827,0.09281818424763236,0.0,0.0,0.06775641214577631,0.03303980708456603,0.0,0.042304161381301504,0.026640518228092703,0.0,0.0,0.02884220476147384,0.03439590953141847,0.08766163341288026,0.0,0.0,0.05838869478282885,0.0,0.03067139490448137,0.0,0.032451582796247026,0.09155601703185907,0.034727532751528935,0.11727452172172224,0.0627395778737746,0.0,0.032756768356390215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048526214472650465,0.030546248792994543,0.06175633930999583,0.07293855356844325,0.13887768323039842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858997137333547,0.030532450049531257,0.06220305326563669,0.23266238661569555,0.09395363472333736,0.030175581367731363,0.0,0.06478628800176021,0.032520043694419035,0.07309697239052478,0.0,0.0,0.06379222221484743,0.0,0.0,0.034622858276127585,0.0,0.0317120042375855,0.045880071215177835,0.0980924659988288,0.05333489640667293,0.028089891657757028,0.0,0.0,0.1418883517555618,0.03909968496600953,0.059952657211857226,0.04844372418487654,0.10674521283994297,0.0,0.0,0.058308019569055014,0.0,0.062143708699699714,0.0,0.029804242892106144,0.06352483769442989,0.03670027354952332,0.0263512031742886,0.0,0.2265685950396777,0.1979541710499695,0.024217747912836925,0.09789446075415524,0.0,0.05486505590152254,0.05656692222016608,0.0,0.03406378964215339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442389214794238,0.0,0.0,0.15171606794496026,0.10007505019015754,0.0,0.1178862446811514
mentalhealth,lucojade_,2020/01/13,"Does light therapy make any noticeable difference for S.A.D. Completely self diagnosing here but I think I’m [22F] struggling with seasonal affective disorder. I live in a country that has very wet, cold, dark and miserable winters. I never really got used to them, especially compared the the winters I experienced in my childhood, which had a lot more sunlight, lovely fluffy snow and more of a dry cold rather than damp cold. 


I was diagnosed with depression as a teenager, I was self harming and very suicidal. I was never diagnosed with anxiety but honestly I wasn’t quite sure how to articulate how I was feeling and I know now that feeling that way isn’t normal and I now recognize some of the symptoms as anxiety.  This wasn’t seasonal, although the symptoms did worsen in the winter. I remember one time I had been clean from self harm for an extended period of time, but relapsed after being out in awful awful weather, I just felt so miserable and angry. 


Recently I’ve been having very passively suicidal thoughts. Just things like “I would actually be kind of happy if I died now just because I don’t think the rest of my life will be at all meaningful”.  I’ve also realized that on the weekends, when I don’t have to get up for work, I’ve been staying in bed as late as 2 or 3 ... after a reasonably decent night of sleep. I am starting to go to sleep later too now. I would be completely socially isolated if it wasn’t for my boyfriend, and I notice myself getting extremely agitated with him recently. 

I feel like a different person in the summer. I love just wandering around town exploring, sitting with a book, doing anything brings me joy it seems. 

I’d like to stress my symptoms now are not anywhere as severe as when I was a teen and I have no desire to self harm. But I think I do have SAD. 

I just want to know if this sounds similar to anyone with SAD and that if it does, have you found light therapy at all helpful? Seems like a load of nonsense to me but then again I’m not in the best humour these days.",4.4566922421142365,6.1101474271099745,5.7293171355498735,77.2000285592498,70.89258312020459,9.71461210571185,31.19190110826939,10.047579312681364,3.378060801364024,1608,71,294,44,30,538,207,391,0.225,0.626,0.15,-0.993,1,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,1,3,21,23,0,4,19,2,34,11,2,6,5,70,60,33,3,10,18,0,5,4,0,3,7,1,2,5,13,17,0,0,18,2,0,3,11,10,0,1,18,12,38,13,50,35,8,51,0,5,0,2,12,14,0,9,35,209,51,2,0.0,0.0,0.08224343140379213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06739729975128084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057312111653186525,0.0,0.1289452873040709,0.0,0.0,0.0589293239239052,0.0,0.06935383284987623,0.07502552574958113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05137524938180248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844484176597646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767283191872491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054352510112670636,0.0,0.07258874795940945,0.256622001189924,0.0874675354278205,0.17610570281026666,0.09659019562368598,0.0,0.1475049589615381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278408723736379,0.06020841085611104,0.08092035301355104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924067698281048,0.0,0.0,0.08806383220551219,0.0,0.04789728138657785,0.0,0.06740502916639926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971578247637159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05648994592776431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877628460958961,0.09263426306255468,0.0,0.09506955619216437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05952823245746847,0.16469641698217988,0.0,0.07441925389907293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165036886939766,0.15212885300266935,0.0,0.056256397720978055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000119035636173,0.0,0.0,0.07908944450732826,0.08257480778796131,0.0,0.19190273137276945,0.0,0.0,0.05710913492591881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358853206775567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08964031107821371,0.0,0.0,0.05399081597287385,0.08665209510476288,0.16642924271146414,0.0,0.0954708475584388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344753819569315,0.3516824519711493,0.09521045296845117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16867826371393668,0.08591107989640512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05965259123151464,0.08982941914876186,0.0,0.0,0.09654047021695282,0.08810594354693196,0.0,0.1843734905831136,0.0,0.07943126934979322,0.2627921672682985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19275908670620373,0.0,0.055990735796866205,0.16200633165196124,0.0,0.06690753010392028,0.09828667058821364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278936330038174,0.0,0.20861519007591955,0.04970950551041545,0.06689616559385579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06135558219839899,0.0,0.0,0.11973772577300648,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shadowfaxxcxsx,2020/01/13,"Back in the E.R. Take care of yourselves, friends.",4.003333333333334,7.044391555555558,1.0311111111111124,103.70000000000002,77.8888888888889,3.6,31.222222222222207,3.1291,0.6053555555555561,40,2,8,0,1,10,9,9,0.0,0.526,0.474,0.743,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4601035088850613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6100700246748971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4622930627779885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4498938210424449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spaceprincess95,2020/01/13,"Emotional abuse schizophrenia? I was dating a guy for a year. The relationship was stressful. He was always weird and shy but he opened up.

 Things were ok but sometimes he could be randomly snappy when I asked a question or had a doubt about something. He started to be distant and opened up about issues he had with his family which made him distressed. He would often take his frustrations out on me. And later apologise. 

Sometimes when he would take his frustrations it would be delusional accusations. Making claims that I’m trying to marry him when I wanted to break up. Which I was confused about. He stopped talking to me once and was angry everyday and mean. I didn’t understand why. He didn’t see me for 2 months. He later admitted that he saw me speaking to a guy at a party and he didn’t like it and that was why. 

When we started officially dating he was hesitant to commit he asked me many times if I was sure. First he made excuses then he said he hears voices and acts mad sometimes and asked if i was sure. I didn’t take him seriously because I thought he was exaggerating about him being depressed. Or using it as an excuse. 

During the relationship he would put me down daily. It seemed he resented me and would get angry easily. I didn’t understand. It was irrational behaviour. So I left him. The last time I saw him he shouted in public that he can get any girl he wants. He said he never wanted to be with me. 

Another time I saw him he shouted to me that “I know what I did” I was confused I asked him what did I do. He couldn’t say but was angry. This was in public too. His best friend calmed him down and asked why he resented me and what I did. But he couldn’t say. He then made up false situations and it seems that he really believes it happened. He also claims he’s famous. I explained that he wasn’t. But he insisted that he was famous and people come up to him in the street. When I didn’t agree he was upset and passive aggressive. 

This all happened over the last year. I still love him. But I’ve blocked him since September. After he shouted at me in public and was aggressive. I’m worried that something might be wrong mentally but I’m not sure. When he calms down he says sorry and says he misses me and says he doesn’t know why he gets paranoid and angry. I know his sister has severe mental health issues. It’s in his family.  

I’m just confused about everything. I know he hasn’t got much friends. And he’s not close to his family. I’m just worried something might be wrong.",1.7953415922754594,4.268944657314632,3.2954578247403923,87.59532009473496,82.38677354709418,6.4347021315358,22.098779376935692,7.686295010490155,1.1198357515030055,1980,65,392,35,55,649,196,499,0.19899999999999998,0.688,0.113,-0.9929,0,0,3,0,1,0,48.0,1,0,0,2,18,31,7,7,12,1,52,2,0,5,6,88,103,42,0,13,15,1,0,1,2,7,1,13,0,3,25,28,0,2,13,0,0,3,14,20,0,1,40,17,56,11,39,46,3,55,0,2,4,1,97,23,0,15,29,237,81,0,0.0,0.08172923866572769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055162753513273266,0.05739633694612741,0.0,0.0,0.0469083168037432,0.07233085271997812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3224318582520785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04204916560143728,0.0,0.0,0.07771609515774877,0.07238956195369381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941959381691935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055074390326462566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059411804720647214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759247346777735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061994183244631476,0.0,0.1950827490813779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058673791617783674,0.0,0.0,0.10658653440429047,0.0,0.1081165748623617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551690798174806,0.0,0.0,0.13660078361922054,0.12199640563221238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332181311542367,0.0777447297794989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399301974786272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15163696584465336,0.11245473778252307,0.0,0.0,0.07494625506258099,0.0,0.0,0.033699821387631355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06225654775051837,0.1958097589166408,0.046044245281028566,0.06993422432471544,0.0,0.07513872356903631,0.0,0.0,0.1390299018090459,0.1463523586788924,0.0,0.0,0.05505865132308476,0.0,0.05070775198228082,0.0,0.05320111967782371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346074617325933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04782158925241525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06934328921925104,0.07727264779531724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0441899317106623,0.0,0.0,0.148115993361182,0.0,0.0,0.13123029746322842,0.27427570015740904,0.0,0.0,0.054967603430728484,0.12559240144553036,0.0,0.07792702034603331,0.0,0.057060423105800624,0.07753566861392436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15931099855687542,0.20466699405013775,0.07721672403975884,0.09764786419264676,0.0,0.05508699026474309,0.05766981717796986,0.07901560125236412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195036635676452,0.0,0.15559163795362968,0.05544298083906587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0458268086286445,0.0,0.0,0.05476189112805403,0.1206672241315175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04683244413826277,0.0,0.0,0.14361985187074808,0.0,0.0595760026135283,0.0,0.0,0.1220574062992324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24897250226888404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010373681517616,0.0,0.2450047211620945,0.15083616011115358,0.0,0.0888408671484114
mentalhealth,Hylasah,2020/01/13,"New Job Nightmares I've just started a new job, one month in. I feel like I've really settled in quick and I get on with everyone in my team. I have no anxiety around going to work, I quite happily get up each morning and drive there. There is nothing I dread about this new job, but every night I get terrible nightmares about members of my team hating me, humiliating me, shouting at me - so I wake up in cold sweats.

I'm a former sufferer of Generlised Anxiety Disorder. I was diagnosed with it in 2016 and it lasted about a year and a half. I felt like I was all clear of it by 2018, and my therapist agreed. Day to day, I have no anxiety symptons, it's just these strange nightmares.

Is this just a case of still adjusting to the new job? Is it completely normal?",3.3067316017316024,4.7640232012986985,4.816298701298702,83.38968614718615,73.48051948051949,8.769696969696971,29.06709956709957,9.2995712137729,2.5235904761904764,599,25,123,14,12,201,87,154,0.192,0.715,0.09300000000000001,-0.9444,4,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,4,12,6,1,1,6,0,7,3,2,0,2,19,16,7,0,1,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,8,9,0,0,3,2,0,2,2,4,0,2,3,4,17,2,23,13,2,26,0,1,0,0,2,10,0,0,16,81,25,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978701868593713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155418593497511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608380877467596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740942541889953,0.0,0.0,0.13173553432336724,0.0,0.0,0.14875218381764124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093548485477058,0.12402124046786145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562642934906643,0.09272299886345876,0.1246200936682689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20343194158581773,0.0,0.07376344109437083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12814213223951518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5151917314865838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579731034185187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268190396284509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359825358887638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5014133541384352,0.0,0.12180043234640955,0.12716801024646765,0.1245383444550101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795000860401579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804912543015038,0.0,0.0,0.08314769144221443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186701775239928,0.0,0.1036515760875902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069781382158692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448968171648016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358140331016324
mentalhealth,JordanSimone93,2020/01/13,"Survey to help with therapy work Hi all, 
Any responses to help with therapy would be greatly appreciated! It’s anonymous and shouldn’t take more than a couple of minutes! TIA 😊

https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/W3WPZ6F",7.8938235294117645,12.019899264705879,7.160294117647062,58.866323529411794,71.05882352941177,9.282352941176473,32.029411764705884,9.516144504307137,4.135317647058823,181,8,24,5,4,56,30,34,0.0,0.6559999999999999,0.344,0.9275,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,6,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,14,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002660560927249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3258520705907548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3246807353921879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39478631491728144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22142287919039874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6735592348138635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143951795128664,0.0,0.0,0.2092001272887926,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TwentyTwoMilTeePiece,2020/01/13,"I want to cut contact with my mother. But such a heavy decision is hard to make. My mother is pretty Toxic. She stuck with me throughout me being in hospital. But I could probably attribute half my problems tp her and her attitude towards life. She revels in hypocrisy - the sort of person to say that the people who support me in my care a bad. But she works in a care home for children herself and literally everytime we speak or see each other she unleashes this bullshit on how the kids are awful. This hits hard. I was in care for a time and the environment wasn't all too great. I also acted very badly and made wrong decisions. Though the way my mother talks about the kids in her care sounds like abuse. She tells me how she will say ""oh boohoo"" etc etc when they lash out. I believe even without being there that this is just fuel for the fire. Treat a person like an animal and they will act like so. I myself have had problems with a previous neighbor about my mental health; completely unprovoked my neighbor would call me a ""retard"" for whatever reason. My mother noted that as the neighbor worked in care how awful her service users must feel. She must have forgotten that line of thought as she told me yesterday ""I'm allowed to not care on my days off"". I told her calmly it's binary in my eyes. Either you're there for the kids. Or you're there for a paycheck. The latter should disqualify you from care imo - go work in a supermarket.

Also my mother has a new boyfriend about half her age that is about 3 years older than me (I'm 20, he's like 23 and she's about 48). Now I won't say anything more than that the guy is a tool. He has a bad temperament and makes stupid and childish decisions. Also he seems to come along every time my mother visits and he's a pain in the balls. I have noted that evertime I see them I feel significantly more low and angry for some time after.

This decision to cut contact would be much easier if she didn't owe me a bill. I have a PIP payment every month. one portion I get for mobility which is quite a bit. Yesterday she told me she owes 700 pounds and that increases by maybe 150 each month. I need to find a way to charge her so I can leave. I actually have a motability car but she told me she would keep it to use (as I can't drive) and she would pay me the equivalent of the payment I'd get.

please help. Thanks",3.0771859513035977,4.750916462184879,4.291848739495799,86.03082848524026,74.50420168067227,7.487093298858006,23.7597500538677,8.222332236545338,1.2934075199310495,1860,55,383,31,39,610,239,476,0.099,0.81,0.09,0.1751,3,0,0,0,1,0,47.0,1,1,3,4,23,27,3,0,33,2,34,4,1,10,3,67,70,32,0,13,11,6,5,4,3,10,3,5,4,7,17,21,0,1,10,1,4,8,6,11,0,3,11,13,69,16,53,44,13,41,0,1,3,0,64,16,0,6,19,257,86,5,0.0,0.08999311927861678,0.07412018816478295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18222125903903666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250370458819048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19025535656857293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855741951788478,0.0,0.0,0.08292214157606789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755756871298497,0.0,0.5420814528573445,0.0,0.0,0.06542768146567036,0.07963636760175805,0.0,0.0,0.06064312183449744,0.0,0.0,0.04898407335413855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941766800580976,0.05016692818144116,0.0,0.12798911195084478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680929126089565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942061806017456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936570376711533,0.0,0.043166432240946274,0.0,0.0,0.08373959907921516,0.0,0.07520644272777273,0.0,0.0,0.13607980487892235,0.0,0.0,0.08073559452093325,0.0,0.0,0.050910393086921295,0.0,0.07618809670604422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751144211105882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042436322752892,0.0,0.0,0.05364858585729025,0.14842923268668315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186955071723453,0.10139982521107453,0.0,0.07630604377160086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654380941910395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12125158282958345,0.0,0.05583496000930579,0.05631895948593017,0.0,0.073356886741602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146842433962337,0.0,0.0808204554918243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05265696898618364,0.1326402789993687,0.0,0.08337472917975354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727256634624229,0.08189130335651908,0.14535552011590644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807864726806684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809340496147578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18120510751686986,0.0,0.0,0.12105107481138455,0.06914570689935412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619174638762182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06104898160399001,0.06638718022688034,0.06992827681966754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462446029811691,0.060299024934832524,0.13286823750679252,0.0,0.0,0.29030936700715265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06559990520981931,0.0,0.06267003892603537,0.044799661676572775,0.12057756581130312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321698574071259,0.0,0.16588634082558912,0.0,0.0,0.21582228788934524,0.08304382109767401,0.0,0.04891191258248795
mentalhealth,sebastiansmit,2020/01/13,"Is what I feel sometimes a panic attack? I'm 15, first time I felt this was when I was 13, but it has been getting a bit more regular. I would probably say once every two weeks or so. It's really weird to describe it, the first way to describe it is I feel like everything I do is fake, I haven't talked to another person while this is going on, but I remember once I was watching a YouTube video and the guy in it, his reactions and comments seemed fake. It's hard to describe it, but that's the first set of emotions I feel. The second would be almost a sort of panic, but not really. It's almost a kind of bounciness. And the final, third, one would be heart racing, but the weird part is that it doesn't actually race, but it feels like it is. From what I've read online, other symptoms are sweating, disorientation, tunnel vision and a few others which I haven't had.

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I know this is an online post, but if anybody could share their experience and wisdom, it would be great.

​

Thanks!",5.433507462686566,5.51340037313433,6.147475124378111,80.82180970149255,67.65671641791045,8.88905472636816,28.690298507462693,8.59863814320734,1.9627641791044768,789,24,158,11,12,259,114,201,0.11599999999999999,0.759,0.125,0.5956,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,1,3,2,14,1,2,13,0,26,3,2,0,0,32,37,17,0,6,10,0,6,2,0,4,1,1,0,2,22,5,0,0,8,2,0,1,4,7,0,7,6,8,14,7,10,23,4,14,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,7,10,113,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.1054522013428384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21641548414011874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341686592522533,0.2626125166099216,0.0,0.11331165272253363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293528302184666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797490785936225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862781227637002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155437239902415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104627185461144,0.0,0.09711849229578554,0.10570464721613868,0.0,0.0,0.2185560789197547,0.15439797089590326,0.10375575548183033,0.11837582789617128,0.0,0.2757505566309581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056457548075562275,0.0,0.061413704101834235,0.0,0.0,0.11913792019575102,0.0,0.1069976363683312,0.0,0.0,0.09680166320465723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12805311291744645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252917295591157,0.059387642228577786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558654610833823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301634294662044,0.07322510615049113,0.0,0.0,0.2535732100766801,0.0,0.11701981365097144,0.0,0.0,0.09435492376325004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349281580306134,0.0,0.11650831471960815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809050250879658,0.0,0.1384536199294114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241234184010125,0.0,0.0,0.08593465089312304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837491224028024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687534886095508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123170246388808,0.0,0.08685554717652468,0.0,0.09948828934906838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301138947679924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556014871139374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577399803070318,0.08668022429423372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070544735555976,0.0,0.2626125166099216,0.0
mentalhealth,redherringconfess,2020/01/13,I'm having an anxiety attack I've never had one before and I don't know how to deal with it.,-0.3013636363636394,1.0198579545454578,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727276,83.0909090909091,6.218181818181819,15.545454545454547,7.1686216300943375,-0.0935272727272718,73,1,17,1,2,28,20,22,0.231,0.769,0.0,-0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,5,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,12,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34135155077252033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5076314477934623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796942055509317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4600257768576399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452268711186496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34414679945435045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30236532374028124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pyrithium,2020/01/13,"My mother is having severe hallucinations I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this. I'd say about... 6 or 7 months ago, my mom started having mild visual hallucinations. They came in spurts, so I foolishly didn't think much of it. I started the process of getting her health insurance. Maybe 5 months ago she had a really bad episode involving visual and auditory hallucinations. I acted like a moron and told her I didn't want to have to 51-50 her. From that point on, she didn't trust me.A fter that episode, I didn't hear from the family about anything else (I don't live at home anymore). Evidently, the hallucinations kept going on and my dad and younger sister just didn't tell me about it. 

Yesterday, it hit a head and my mom started calling family members while I was at work. She told them some nasty things that my dad said and they were ready to come out to our house and ""solve"" the problem.

My dad took her to an emergency room last night because she also hasn't been eating or sleeping well, been dizzy, and has fainted a couple times wherein she's hit her head or scraped her knees and elbows. My dad said he told the doctor about all that and mentioned the hallucinations, but the doctor only responded to the physical, not mental. They did some preliminary blood work and a CAT scan on her head and chest (she's been saying her ribs hurt), but they apparently came back fine. 

The nurses have started another round of blood tests and fed her breakfast. They're going to be coming back for more tests at 11am and apparently the doctor will be coming around as well. I'm going to try and flag him down when he does show back up and let him know about these hallucinations. I'm just not sure what to do here. I'm afraid, so I can't even imagine how my mom or dad or sister feel. I just want her to return to normal but the more I interact with her and the more research I do... I just don't think that's possible. She's not even that old, only in her mid 50s. What the hell could be happening? 

If the doctor won't admit her, theres a Crisis hotline that services my area. They come out with a clinician and police officer and do a face to face assessment of the situation. If the clinician deems her unfit or whatnot, they'll take her involuntarily. So I guess I know what the next step is, I just wish I knew beyond that. I'm not even really sure why I'm posting this. Just... yeah I don't know.",3.6585983917802096,5.092308904958681,4.773605092696002,84.13704154567796,72.55371900826447,7.877060531605986,24.444717444717444,8.441846121484758,1.396660888988162,1906,55,395,32,37,626,228,484,0.08800000000000001,0.877,0.035,-0.9655,2,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,1,0,7,2,29,14,2,1,27,1,36,22,12,1,4,77,81,39,0,9,23,11,2,1,0,3,7,5,2,0,19,30,3,1,9,1,0,12,16,6,2,0,23,8,59,8,42,48,7,54,1,1,2,0,60,20,1,12,21,248,78,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636118841328826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06150897664226373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806521873386475,0.0,0.0,0.07627911020750826,0.0,0.0,0.06329457263951334,0.06847074479147572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17742888964532705,0.06422089466923801,0.046886730267791006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853891539695364,0.17594076499494174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650221880093975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06141044767393969,0.08510509376372992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3149034507677017,0.06730892119465727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870334784622353,0.06425269543450901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152405091864655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501741957300693,0.0,0.03889058494319116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04018496451747045,0.0,0.13113786930220278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473065270368688,0.0,0.06801576776498565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368112438201905,0.08175715320664398,0.08668890625475498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771521152705901,0.0,0.0,0.08874969708174227,0.0823392039549732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681158022684075,0.06269607116251676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865089957880395,0.0,0.03757683209344344,0.0,0.06791744130262102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772715547367414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751232886599052,0.0,0.0,0.2702461019977944,0.12278579594005505,0.0,0.05654144750967378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180008005092954,0.07217960975889715,0.07536046610491401,0.0,0.0,0.08070945757410675,0.0,0.0,0.11699479697789175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035990759793216,0.0,0.07270962942909519,0.08671021707906089,0.14732680651639174,0.0,0.0,0.07359736184556318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854756350262074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06568507403341035,0.14632774448941874,0.12233194726556383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689216851932581,0.0,0.0,0.0864557935558569,0.07697064586508866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21776361096069044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21747471081772565,0.0,0.05783058202076249,0.0,0.06722718643458872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051098973890970366,0.09856817910364367,0.0,0.0,0.04484981258719799,0.0,0.0,0.22048701879788848,0.08545550472994529,0.052220303178074516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907330360302904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831182172782158,0.0,0.06940391319904776,0.0,0.08844856762989857,0.0,0.0,0.11199021581697996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hydn7822,2020/01/13,"Anxiety is back, just in time Having been out of work for 3 weeks, unable to get work and having an increasingly difficult time reaching someone from the unemployment office, to get help, its like the anxiety is getting much, much worse. What really hurts is, working so hard throughout the year, it is so very difficult to get the help. I have never asked for help in such a way, the state is so unorganized its disgusting. This also effects my ability to get proper help, seeing a therapist. Id have to rely on state-funded insurance assistance to see a therapist, which I have been through, and it got me nowhere.   


I dont know how people in a similar situation deal. After going through depression and all that years back, I thought I finally strengthened up. Im really not looking forward to being homeless. $350 in bills, and I can't find a damn thing for work, for the first time in years.",7.690723208415518,7.2562906035502985,8.141617357001973,70.1365023011177,63.0828402366864,12.008152531229456,37.12097304404997,11.429527900616536,4.381212491781723,708,31,126,19,9,235,106,169,0.149,0.727,0.124,-0.6772,2,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,6,9,7,2,0,12,0,15,0,0,2,2,14,28,9,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,4,0,1,3,4,6,0,1,4,4,8,1,24,23,4,26,0,2,3,0,6,9,1,0,15,87,17,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987192160876792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18887073707454485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540475506060405,0.0,0.0,0.189843736131557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12726675380814914,0.10632331446190972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446770517728924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13522836654189685,0.1128268298336336,0.10500256684985312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3224755484673503,0.0,0.07015684736129348,0.0,0.09873053763622967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058280247202416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3309713118717815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215081946483406,0.0,0.13334218063327394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784234580719582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06030917127589131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366301850214936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181493098384029,0.0,0.09520867786844306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558147486110301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581645273162435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19673995133670225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875776564632356,0.0,0.0,0.10459485960261074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866591733006481,0.08201161717808947,0.0,0.0,0.09800183310899307,0.21594596018259649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185535673920224,0.0,0.09798518710790807,0.09902042799713837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3594787921522927,0.0,0.12580137609442052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23848430878266025
mentalhealth,Monarch_of_Gold,2020/01/13,"I believe I'm one of a very small number of true cases of age dysphoria. Hear me out. I know what you're thinking.

I don't think I'm 7. I know for a fact that I am a healthy, though unfit, 24-year old. My birthday is 3 days after Christmas, which is when my house burned down. I am smart and capable of handling adult things. Of that I have no doubt. I will turn 25 next year just like any other person my age.

My body doesn't agree with me.

My body looks 12.

At the age of 24, I am still 4'7, 85 lbs, just like I have been for the last 10 years. I can usually only wear children's clothes (Girls size 12) and discovered in a shoe-replacement trip this past Friday that either my feet are one size smaller (size 1 instead of 2) or everyone changed conventions.

My body will not allow internal masturbation or sex because of what I think is a case of vaginismus (which makes your vaginal walls seize and form an inpenetrable wall instead of relaxing and expanding). Pleasure can only be derived from outside. If I want to have sex, I will need to pay to convince my body that it's an adult.

I am so small that people have been commenting on it or mistaking me for a young child in almost every social situation for the last 10 years. I've been given children's menus, cups, and discounts at restaurants even when I've tried to dress like an adult to avoid being mistaken for a child. People have been concerned for me when I'm at work, thinking my employer, whoever it may be, is sleazy enough to employ a 12-year-old despite the law clearly stating that's illegal.

I didn't fully connect the dots on this until after the fire, when I had to throw every adult dress and shirt I owned away because of smoke damage, leaving me with children's clothing, some of which is 10 years old. When I had to throw it away, I felt like I was throwing away my identity as an adult. Even when I was trying on actual adult clothing at Khol's (because you cant attend an interview in a T-shirt) I couldn't help but think I looked like a little girl trying to dress up like a teacher for career day.

I don't know what to do anymore. It feels so disgusting and discouraging to try SO hard to be an adult just to be mistaken and infantilized.

Please share any advice you may have for dealing with this. Even if it's technically advice for trans people, please share.",5.505476190476191,5.6217624658119645,5.9559218559218525,82.13153846153847,67.5042735042735,9.07887667887668,30.816849816849818,8.841846274778883,2.293218315018316,1846,66,374,28,28,596,230,468,0.085,0.825,0.09,0.1051,2,1,1,0,0,0,56.0,0,3,0,1,19,19,1,2,23,0,43,9,7,2,3,50,64,26,0,6,11,0,4,6,0,5,0,1,0,15,23,12,0,2,10,1,2,5,8,6,0,2,11,7,43,13,58,42,5,54,1,2,2,2,26,21,0,10,33,232,66,6,0.0,0.0,0.08095069869390753,0.0,0.0,0.1621224981583304,0.0,0.0,0.08306599779916612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282251731862365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226763140495545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338127729189615,0.0,0.0,0.15170314256266154,0.0,0.0,0.09346024425215822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.368570774440898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775385674649266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699635446352472,0.08552146766412988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571319212415986,0.0,0.16437011244168498,0.0,0.13978388741539122,0.07926567200682393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041943807400556636,0.0,0.07964841693974559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431008714244827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349467983126708,0.0,0.05560201603921314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957172592464713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367673051193351,0.13523642997159901,0.0,0.0878358319977173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24316148656844336,0.08314124986923968,0.0,0.0,0.13932017937947894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055372138829625016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06150900629075956,0.0,0.0,0.08822204160770779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26113738958953964,0.0,0.11242294479081286,0.1261798257464126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918854995028579,0.17252864041811625,0.07243184027057957,0.0,0.18211617502944127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324326591811848,0.0,0.08456069772936835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624681225695653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05511065267801205,0.26576642689907826,0.08150144178477095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252800611869745,0.0902296417858364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136161583432023,0.06844536642241537,0.04892815309516906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06039117243718092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32051619911205226
mentalhealth,daylightrobber98,2020/01/13,"Any support, reassurance and genuine advice would be appreciated. I don't know where to begin, in the past 6 years or so, my whole life has become derailed. It started when my father had to relocate midway during my high school, as I joined school late that year I pretty much lagged behind in every thing which was a first for me. Fast forward to my final exam and i was pretty much helpless since I could not understand anything no matter how hard i tried. To make things even more terrible, my beloved uncle who was like a father to me, passed away after a long battle with cancer back in my home country. I somehow managed to get by in my exams and my father was persistent on me joining engineering, something which I knew I didn't want or like. Nonetheless i had to join it anyway. 

This is when I got back with my highschool sweetheart, things were going great until they weren't. In a few months the relationship turned toxic and culminated in her cheating on me and eventually leaving, right around the same time my family shifted back to our hometown as well because my father was not doing well financially. I wanted to vent and grief but i had no time to do that because I was busy trying to help my brother who was being bullied at school and supporting my parents in whichever way i could. Things back at college sucked too as my roommate became a full blown junkie and i had to relocate. And this might seem like a fucking joke but in the next one year after that I had an accident, a surgery and slipped discs on my back. My dean at college called my father to his office and insulted him in front of me because we were late with the fees. That broke me bad. 

I'm now in my final year and I'm terrible with engineering, I want to pursue my dreams but my father wants me to just find a job so that I can help him out a bit even though I'm sure that if I get just one more year to do what I really want to do, I can help him out much better. I feel like I'm starting to lose my head, idk what to do.

Tl;dr - lost my uncle to cancer, lost my friends, have had bad luck with health, dealt with some trauma and stuck with a degree i hate.",7.8899065420560754,6.061257429906544,7.891981308411214,76.59671028037386,63.485981308411205,10.429158878504673,33.549532710280374,8.841846274778883,2.615977196261683,1692,52,336,20,20,549,218,428,0.175,0.675,0.15,-0.956,2,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,2,0,1,6,23,33,6,0,16,0,34,6,1,2,1,57,65,29,1,9,10,8,2,4,2,2,4,0,1,0,20,24,0,0,6,2,1,4,7,17,2,3,22,2,62,16,57,37,11,60,0,6,0,1,27,25,2,8,36,247,82,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937412639578822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05523717467759297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668429354491635,0.07230928946024008,0.0,0.0,0.0763154807894904,0.3122929113508097,0.13564237620536726,0.14854575458919125,0.08970888737965331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183871874457362,0.08867889340630794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294189269631902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129706368764099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729939174672444,0.0,0.06843728707516085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657362717914462,0.0,0.04107083357278395,0.05802861579493696,0.0,0.1779605106604874,0.07424004580864513,0.0690916813354851,0.0,0.0,0.06275581197894582,0.0750930924376433,0.08487555495686673,0.0,0.046163200451280584,0.0,0.06496468656997449,0.08955310173484328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276347596823225,0.08019488853915024,0.08336238018627702,0.08634054842938417,0.0,0.0,0.1633343243198862,0.08582083067136677,0.08147734704158559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060530670278226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044640258597346036,0.0,0.18325528515457687,0.08600771034575615,0.0,0.0,0.05737306268523654,0.1587337212188124,0.0,0.0,0.07188337704576463,0.0,0.09087228411579733,0.17733782546626015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054219681983625465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616905648785315,0.0,0.0,0.06483465082258566,0.0,0.1791336682664637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638588179940243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008309310528823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090193018750243,0.0,0.07754040363620196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16527420889061936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052036123724183085,0.0,0.0,0.08720744587859461,0.0,0.06936745095973419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24661831225725706,0.0,0.07394604933118758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719184939974138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253254614503438,0.0,0.0,0.1149858383081588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18435097177030446,0.07655552680536279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21585455250741925,0.0,0.07980515739827293,0.0,0.09472828404252913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029566071479274,0.08835169792117678,0.0,0.08456021645527778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395490725966753,0.06447424597665384,0.0,0.0,0.14606573338070766,0.0,0.0,0.0906870927961492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057701360875032005,0.0,0.0,0.26153776300037884
mentalhealth,wanderbun123,2020/01/13,How do I get the motivation to job hunt? To get a job I have to polish my resume and go in person to meet the manager and drive places and exert so much energy. I don’t know if I can. But I need to. I’m just so out of energy. I’m not even taking the recommended amount of college credits (15) because I’m too tired to go to class for more than 2 days a week. I barely even think I can go to my classes tomorrow. I need a longer break. But there is no break I can take. It’s either job or school. I’m considering just killing myself because Ii just need that long of a rest.,0.7822727272727263,2.1956579920634915,3.48679653679654,90.46577922077923,80.19047619047619,6.8040404040404034,20.184704184704184,7.686295010490155,0.4965492063492056,441,11,106,7,11,156,76,126,0.08,0.8240000000000001,0.096,-0.0112,3,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,1,10,2,1,0,7,0,7,1,0,2,0,20,23,10,1,4,9,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,0,1,4,3,1,0,0,0,0,12,1,15,23,5,13,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,4,66,14,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21612752129792945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432619236231925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234173823807306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18523528352268945,0.0,0.3022443928026144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5277472476537338,0.0,0.19612591954542036,0.0,0.09742441109230808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688071476419066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031579330727458,0.3943362661543616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478763824152575,0.1852121862803762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794093836011861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665739384251769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358915468645528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20374883066417196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14219742505876426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BadMeditator,2020/01/13,"What is happening to me? I know this isn't supposed to be a proper diagnosis. Just wanted to share and know some stuff.

For the last year, I have been experiencing some very weird emotional experiences. Whenever I encounter the slightest of difficult obstacles, I go through hours of intense panic and confusion where I don't know what to do. I'm constantly indecisive and can't think straight.


These are somewhat new to me in the last 6 months. Last year something happened to be that crushed my dreams. I also got to know some troubling secrets about my parents' marriage, and about my mother's well-being. Are these issues related to what I'm facing? What am I really facing?",4.787418181818183,7.231665720000002,5.456218181818183,76.18410909090913,71.8,8.705454545454547,32.163636363636364,9.339509955726095,3.3284400000000005,545,26,92,13,11,176,80,125,0.182,0.755,0.064,-0.9328,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,3,4,0,12,2,2,0,0,18,24,5,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,6,1,0,1,3,6,0,0,2,1,12,1,15,20,4,13,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,6,9,63,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427324809514432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928762972989543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20076891626793125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17459024342129326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10143578197293747,0.0,0.14274885013240782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31566317005648403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757694209979947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18628947649755426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3923575050282572,0.43646145350362187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246311869282227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723796196127672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094108898631615,0.19818381949245725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11434053205157732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740463518500268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043198900353457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436445145359747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726684774996993,0.10527366933919624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047730378398914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298739016883765
mentalhealth,tanlittlecookie,2020/01/13,"My boyfriends panic attacks My (21f) boyfriend(20m) has recently been having panic attacks.. he typically has seasonal depression, but recently, he has been having these panic attacks. The first one happened when we were having dinner at an Italian place, he felt like he was not feeling good, his stomach started to hurt and his head felt weird. He was weird the rest of the night, didn’t want to be touched, and he just was not feeling like himself. 

The next one happened when we were having dinner in another state, and he figured it was because we were eating out. 

The next one happened when he was at home, but it was after he ate again. IM not sure if it matters if he eats, but it seems like the pattern. 

Last one was last night, he felt a little weird when he was eating Chinese food.

I’m just worried a bit, and he keeps on looking at the internet worrying himself more. He’s never had panic attacks really, he doesn’t feel like himself when he has them. He also has been under a lot of stress, he’s been thinking of switching schools, which means we would have to go and look for a new apartment, new jobs, and me possibly even transferring. 

He doesn’t like to go to therapy, he thinks it’s stupid to pay somebody to be your friend which I understand to a point, except I don’t because I used to go and it worked well for me. 

Tl;dr my boyfriend has been having panic attacks and I think it is due to stress and his depression and anxiety ( which has been escalating a lot lately ). Anyone have any advice? It’s just making me nervous",5.1842976588628735,6.1131537424749185,5.513409698996657,82.16175334448162,68.4314381270903,8.12046822742475,31.337959866220736,8.238735603445708,2.281161739130435,1215,49,229,16,20,387,143,299,0.233,0.693,0.073,-0.9949,1,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,4,1,1,2,12,29,6,8,14,0,40,9,2,2,2,50,67,21,0,4,12,0,7,5,1,1,0,0,1,0,12,15,7,1,13,0,1,3,8,20,1,5,23,9,22,9,24,41,5,38,0,3,2,0,33,11,0,5,28,152,34,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167107751300274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586533090677347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049876553074442484,0.07690776093504575,0.056108091993179496,0.0,0.0,0.051283951464179814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41719792845481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941985484709396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007284151259715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634245836598898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251481997207273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04844313488649367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11125505363703107,0.10479418443922216,0.21126572545291653,0.0,0.0,0.06238651653068141,0.08868806575542422,0.0,0.056665526525695585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504955209060067,0.06151761296025636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945740312703152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527228182905828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357018616183683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851645469653105,0.0,0.07922429332808723,0.0,0.07278277502983657,0.06519167138835529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957058107518685,0.08273542238115285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17916129212989582,0.07351013007567601,0.0,0.0,0.12318126711420906,0.0,0.0,0.12470918703339035,0.0,0.0,0.04895780535336989,0.0,0.0,0.07989330654767482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656754814572663,0.14167251964976016,0.15600472122620032,0.13765707676131694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19879964056496024,0.0,0.0,0.4302679237205948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662905081983576,0.0,0.06933395091107512,0.08268453548248386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04698615564366102,0.0,0.14483704609366088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742282192637091,0.0,0.06676978096072739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05191338351989059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680310059327491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912601555268341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387545443152844,0.0,0.0,0.14098795465662303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635387125853255,0.0,0.06334581709142999,0.0,0.0,0.04326029382581086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06594522027821514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053395431849554274,0.14896913684679972,0.0,0.05210159652351906,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,forest-walks,2020/01/13,"Cyclothymia Does anyone have cyclothymia? If you do, what kind of symptoms do you have, what is it like? I've never heard of it before but stumbled across it on the Internet today and I can strongly relate to it so wondering if I might have it. I feel weird going to the doctors and asking about it though as it doesn't seem like a very well known disorder.",6.218661971830986,5.968896183098593,6.29024647887324,81.57931338028173,66.04225352112675,8.790140845070423,30.426056338028175,8.07648339933343,2.0213915492957746,283,9,55,3,4,90,49,71,0.079,0.775,0.146,0.6254,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,1,4,6,0,0,3,0,9,2,0,0,1,11,15,8,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,9,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,2,5,5,8,13,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,5,4,43,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748601830632711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337889458106351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21279775304863494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866107765072019,0.2559651821205869,0.2188447313604067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264468284928821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212495297426084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26041750206227543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443507213875086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652929818871089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928753838539722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22766139871343924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599265437326563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24570012762229065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23704447385711186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20634034069670007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22484993766618408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711986610599984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mygawdtheaudacity,2020/01/13,"Extremely huge pointless depressing rant about a random peson's fucked up life. I dont have anyone to talk to about my mental health really. 

Not anyone trust worthy at least.

My mother has abused me horrifically and i despise her existence. My father is a strict snob who doesnt respect anyone but himself and never did anything to help me. My friends wont talk about mental problems and actively avoid conversations about them and i as my paranoid self feel awkward and scared of expressing how i feel to them.

The worst part is i do actually have a therapist. And shes helped quite a bit with realising i was abused and how terribly i treat myself. But shes also really into alternative medicine wich prevents her from even considering medication for my depression and shes incredibly homophobic and sexist.

For context i am, in fact, a barely 18 years old butch lesbian.

So talking to her isnt really the most comforting thing, it has caused me quite a bit of stress actually due to her honestly quite idiotic and offensive opinions. (she once compared gay couples adopting children to cloning. no, i dont get it either)

The thought of switching to another therapist, while appealing, stresses me quite a bit as well.

What if it is a bad idea while im working for my final exams? What do i tell my father when he questions why i want to switch? Will he ever take me to another? Will i have to be the one to tell her? How will she react? Will she be angry? What if the next therapist is worse?

I realise that most of the above are at least unreasonable but knowing that doesnt change the fact that they feel like real, plausible outcomes to me. As if they are inevitable, i struggle to avoid them, abbsolutely terrified of everything.

Terrified is a great word to describe myself. Alongside angry and sad and tired, so extremely tired.

Sometimes i just want to go find a place where im alone and scream.

Sometimes i just wanna be able to lay in bed and do nothing at all and just rest.

But i cant do that because i constantly have to do something, anything, as unproductive as that is, i just need to be constantly busy or the guilt kicks in.

Sometimes im guilty for existing, for causing any kind of disturbance to other people.

Im scared of being in environments i dont know, with people i dont know, the mind numbing feeling that they are judging me completely overcoming my thoughts, paralyzing me into constant terror.

Sometimes i get really panicked and  i cant breath properly and my heart pounds, my hands shake, my eyes water, my stomach and head hurt.

Loud noises panick me. Things moving sharply towards me panick me.

And sometimes everything feels dull and uninteresting.

As if ive fallen into a deep pit of tar, everything slow and dark and muddy and lifeless.

I dont really want to live most of the times.

I dont want to die, i have never really been suicidal i think, i just dont feel like existing.

I wish time would stop so i could pick myself up, get ready for all that is to come because its moving too fast now and im getting left behind. 

Thats how i feel at least.

Completely lost and hopeless.

I have trouble with studying because it is a big part of my trauma (for the entirety of my childhood my parents used my grades as a way to measure my worth as a human being). I dont want to succeed because i dont want my parents to be pleased by me. And i think i want to get into university. I say i do. But i dont really feel like it. Dont really care that much. Id much rather divert my passion towards my fine arts exams, my country's fine arts universtity being a much more appealing option. But its astoudingly difficult to get in (about 90-130 people pass each year) so i ''need'' to first get into a normal university through the national exams to have one ensured. 

Do i sound like a brat?

I think i could have actually liked school once to be honest.

Outside of school history, philosophy, chemistry and literature are actually things i find appealing.

But in the context of studying for exams they become dull and uninteresting to the point of tears.

And i just think that once i actually were a happy cheerfull child, full of life and wonder and confidence.

And it was sucked out of me.

Oookay that's- ive written quite a bit huh?

I'm sorry about that, i kinda went off the rails ranting. Dont feel like ive said even half of the stuff i need to say. Dont really feel like i have the energy to really.

Quite a bit depressing too. Uh... yeah.

Look, i dont want to leave this on a sad note.

So, hey person who actually sat through all this emotional baggage from a stranger. I hope you're doing okay, i really do. Thank you for actually reading this? I dunno, i'll just post this and go, uh, yeah.",3.328277925707205,5.546437899343548,4.842554375049434,79.95755226595661,75.36761487964989,8.037204397458543,27.75165431968575,8.841846274778883,2.4151750705227912,3736,153,693,83,83,1250,387,914,0.20600000000000002,0.662,0.131,-0.9981,2,3,1,0,2,2,110.0,0,1,7,10,33,63,6,12,39,4,80,18,6,9,8,141,136,66,2,24,22,5,11,7,1,6,7,6,1,5,34,44,1,4,24,3,1,9,24,37,3,4,12,19,114,26,107,107,25,65,0,10,2,4,49,31,2,16,30,470,148,10,0.034994786039394966,0.08292619813384527,0.2390490418111225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03624404446154346,0.0,0.027985317752436203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02379765452913483,0.07339016882781924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734075042041452,0.0,0.05759545432281948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02921918460970542,0.08532998703901758,0.03864899177980699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910262139244927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0356795166473927,0.07189857003984951,0.03701984348664232,0.030144909522818862,0.07338273471727838,0.11345079474925245,0.0,0.055880978201600894,0.038721065141122224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042287381210576,0.0,0.0363190629447066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5741908005484586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03936442412488945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04622745227066563,0.03165478746194366,0.0,0.0,0.0943531716461349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17694415297189056,0.12500141069416326,0.0,0.038335077574529225,0.06396920091200686,0.029766547128014638,0.0,0.0,0.02703688488571647,0.032352115794950995,0.12798331944338415,0.0,0.039776686722697824,0.0,0.0,0.03858187515088042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03725260046433822,0.0,0.0,0.03591474647243604,0.03719782112990678,0.0,0.04146898995000848,0.04691253484755166,0.0,0.0,0.03475771863434515,0.0,0.0,0.03746264223455257,0.039504853858480314,0.1890018702899043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036441684517266315,0.05769665764359699,0.0,0.0,0.037054425567506086,0.038021937425164666,0.0,0.049435704596799725,0.11967679362749653,0.0,0.03090103720698697,0.0,0.0293868066110119,0.0,0.03820094284353403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03525356529647493,0.07053302693238382,0.0,0.035334758007671475,0.0,0.0,0.07438783875246711,0.07717558287193177,0.07784457129266265,0.05398027270741789,0.0,0.03721735196008832,0.0,0.0342874602220028,0.033578441019398206,0.0,0.036721141191709786,0.1118049150770756,0.04742674538495044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771513708606627,0.07579188612732038,0.0,0.07278293515569195,0.03055609735777798,0.036562103150636606,0.038413766334237695,0.03308138412169538,0.0,0.033515331573407664,0.0,0.0,0.03348528409061348,0.0,0.0,0.03920216929714541,0.22332757527752706,0.0350042561254905,0.03983172784650117,0.24660411632500376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033288055248832785,0.05565851689278042,0.07007177143043687,0.0708331835086567,0.0,0.0,0.03650719391833445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026940695983684537,0.17305369103661836,0.039173797905771066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029257208091725363,0.0801728183461737,0.03658414855102913,0.04006065758590149,0.03827861604348756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026311723946766667,0.08438245031859115,0.061173970912125834,0.032218497287292064,0.0,0.12189493144390776,0.06974694260380483,0.0896929834660631,0.0,0.0555639023194936,0.04081148232037162,0.08044271722259068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03022425925780489,0.0,0.0,0.16512665191741804,0.02777723228485969,0.0,0.0,0.03146451535426604,0.032440517256277814,0.03157735130978063,0.0,0.04024227689995034,0.0,0.037950352682094776,0.025476621022569708,0.0,0.035662676662355335,0.024859291952924082,0.0,0.0,0.04507098972048276
mentalhealth,chaostookenbystorm,2020/01/13,My sister passed away this weekend I was really close with her and I can't believe she's gone. Does anyone have advice on how to cope?,0.06892857142857167,2.441872321428576,1.8900000000000008,93.98000000000002,93.64285714285714,4.228571428571429,14.142857142857142,5.985473137389443,-0.6563857142857144,107,2,22,1,4,35,27,28,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,4,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,5,0,4,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44732526057357946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200817923770589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4300877865380604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5157473958060752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4005955652051947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29325768561018595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cantStoplonely,2020/01/13,"How can I become less anxious and stressed when dealing with a stressful environment? I attend someplace that is similar to military boot camp, however it is much longer and more stressful. The environment is extremely stressful 100% of the time. 

I have only been here for four months. Before I came I was a very level headed, strong willed person who never cried. In this institution, superiors do basically whatever they want to the first years with little consequence. 

Every time I get confronted by superiors, I become extremely anxious, my chest tightens, my heart rate goes up and I get the strong urge to cry. I’d like to get better and feel better about dealing with the environment. 

I have been to a few counselling sessions that helped me feel better, however I still am struggling. If anyone can help me, thank you.",6.041894977168948,8.468331979452053,6.289246575342473,71.641997716895,68.24657534246576,9.250228310502283,32.029680365296805,9.725611199111238,3.5491296803652963,663,29,103,16,12,212,96,146,0.14,0.672,0.188,0.7821,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,6,5,15,1,5,8,0,13,3,3,1,1,14,21,7,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,6,0,2,4,2,16,9,14,16,4,14,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,9,72,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729489436995885,0.0,0.08446917442610333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668377134001949,0.10279556045783173,0.0,0.0,0.3205247551829992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13816793497444496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265395698974632,0.0,0.249087854730442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178283182336358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12216456627782535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275607468250277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893457800263581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398006241212753,0.0,0.0,0.1431536754997233,0.16194514982235536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059018878238727625,0.12107764363252793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642483860814596,0.0,0.0888050593971465,0.0,0.09317172243476224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187711274106644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548165390491764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647446891709947,0.0,0.5535236635983735,0.12629088232969188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122036758825808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14088391600075562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996761980006879,0.07125350525006274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779400757862001
mentalhealth,summers6497,2020/01/13,"Lets Raise Awareness Mental health needs way more awareness, its just wrote off. Alot of people lack imagination and therefore can not Fathem what mental health is. It isn't just a low mood and it is not consistent at all. think of constantly walking around with bricks on your back, some days its just the one brick other days its 10 or 100. Its unpredictable and thats scary. just because most people cant spot it doesent mean it isnt there. And if you suffer with mental health i know how hard it is to do the smallest thing on those days your weighed down and its okay to take a day or two to embrace it and cry to do what ever you need to Until you feel like you are ready to take the next step. who the fuck are we to judge the way you handle things and the coping strategies you do?, we dont know you we dont know your reasons and we dont know the experiences you have been through. I just want to say if your struggling with mental heath then i am proud of you even for the smallest thing that most people would do so without hesitation. we as a generation are so shallow in so many aspects of our lives. most importantly our level of perception we take one look at person and based on what there wearing/how attractive they are we make a 5 second assumption and think that we know them. we do not Observe there emotions, Body language or how they speak. We do the same with illnesse's. if it isnt obvious without visual symptoms then we write it off.",4.257643593519886,5.482407096219933,4.4527736867943055,87.81948453608248,70.82130584192441,7.329798723613157,26.228276877761417,7.62386473244151,1.2252132547864505,1159,36,239,13,21,361,151,291,0.066,0.857,0.077,0.0514,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,13,13,3,1,17,9,1,1,14,1,26,8,1,5,3,74,45,25,0,8,16,0,2,1,0,1,5,2,0,1,25,26,1,0,12,0,0,2,12,4,0,4,2,5,32,4,33,41,9,27,0,2,1,1,35,12,1,11,12,179,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791062989293305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593454935840115,0.0,0.06019858560052796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969172559758618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671633136485292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847494488583738,0.25474867933430323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472114577832677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108323052781416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522507125982628,0.08932725757115148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659885911817573,0.0,0.0,0.049932213088562584,0.07054878016956488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129506189424463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846281097927078,0.0,0.0,0.3149077547734177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27135885867292003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098108534784432,0.0,0.048245465837650006,0.0,0.08720023513418887,0.0,0.0829271985001126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591803669148104,0.1001194989056812,0.0,0.10757038381114588,0.0,0.0,0.3980770284202155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14644740186057514,0.0,0.0,0.10502436601894273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338344509770011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205387573783372,0.08622684269571841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153398041658608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853192318045032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323751706018842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10264162196652617,0.222748689590116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968202476248072,0.12655318324329853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646680824746896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05824676198435365,0.15677021909601616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19038770303398206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015091723439906,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LordBlackman,2020/01/13,"Just need to get things out I’m stuck in a rut again. I’m not going to sleep until 7am and waking up when the day’s already over. I’m going back to work in a few weeks and I have no idea how I’m going to fix this. I fucked up everything with that girl because I can’t keep things to myself but honestly that’s making me feel even worse. There is so much in my head all the time and I can’t concentrate on anything. I can usually distract myself but I can’t anymore. I don’t know what I’m gonna do now. I don’t know how I’m going to get out of this. I used to have people I could talk to, but I don’t have them anymore either. And I can’t help myself because I have no energy to go anything at all. Fuck this. I just want to sleep for like a month.",-0.17244186046511345,1.2742954186046518,2.460639534883722,96.56793604651165,83.18604651162791,5.462790697674419,17.726744186046513,6.322622252153567,-0.4049255813953487,580,12,147,5,16,202,92,172,0.128,0.78,0.092,-0.7027,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,1,11,5,2,1,5,0,15,6,4,4,2,28,40,12,0,3,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,7,0,1,4,0,0,5,10,3,0,0,1,1,20,2,24,37,5,25,0,0,0,2,4,10,2,0,11,98,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632482122299624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989502725977429,0.0,0.0,0.2480617523338341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589545897491853,0.0,0.18375674226720687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033877966412508,0.0,0.0,0.0972028390375802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955006823903666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13545868258751326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620927235926434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786790252863064,0.15749142935920002,0.0,0.4282922466051724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546836473351348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010253824501479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014612331904133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339681123142392,0.0,0.0,0.16566508783437547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363486652593905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060770995066813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030438958829512,0.0,0.1107975768208696,0.11175801395888517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449124644180736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.301660513616317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114415821156845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20026521196450575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788686484691563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301749036036802,0.1659983367224737,0.0,0.08889939126546809,0.0,0.12089962180968272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972697982347067,0.0,0.15359799084480474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hemera-ilios,2020/01/13,"I've just agreed, on the recommendation of a psychiatrist, to allow my mum to be sectioned. Struggling to feel like I'm doing the right thing. (Venting - TL;DR at end) I'm 23 and living abroad from my mum (53) as I'm completing a doctorate. While my mum's suffered from depression before, she'd never suffered from psychosis (apart from a brief isolated episode triggered by corticosteroid medication) until about this time last year when my partner and I visited for Christmas. She became extremely paranoid and suffered from delusions and auditory hallucinations, with most of her paranoid delusions being fixated upon the police, an ex-boyfriend of her's, and an ex-friend who had slept with him (neither of whom she's seen or spoken to in years). At first these were fairly 'typical' delusions (secret cameras and monitoring devices in the house, them breaking in and stealing from her, etc.)  but they rapidly escalated. 

Eventually, she had delusions about things which weren't specifically to do with them, and one night she locked herself in the bathroom in the middle of the night and called the police, claiming that my partner had killed her/our dog and that he had a knife and was trying to kill her. My partner woke up between the phone call and the arrival of the police to see her crawling around on the landing muttering 'no please don't say that, he's a good DM' (we'd been talking about playing dnd not long before). After that, the police arrived w tasers and arrested my partner, but let him go upon seeing that the dog was fine and my mum was clearly suffering from a psychotic episode. She was brought to hospital and they released her the following morning. 

We had to leave and go back home the next day, and I tried to speak to various mental health professionals to get more help for her, but because they were putting it down to physical health issues (she has suspected lupus) they just kind of brushed it off as not their problem. The issues continued, and I received calls from her where she insisted that the people around me were imposters and I wasn't safe. I spoke to multiple professionals and told them what was going on, and they assured me they were looking into her case, but they couldn't tell me anything because of confidentiality. 

Not long later, my mum killed our dog because she believed there was something evil in him. This came as a complete and utter shock to me. She'd never displayed violent tendencies, and even in her worst of health, that dog was everything to her. She realised not long afterwards what she'd done and reached out to the crisis team and told them. Still, nothing was done even though I tried to urge mental health professionals that she clearly needed some form of help. 

Since then, she's had sporadic psychotic episodes, although nowhere near as severe. I can usually tell when it's bad because on top of beliefs about her ex-boyfriend and ex-friend conspiring against her (she has a current fixation on something called 'V2K', or 'voice to skull' technology - it's conspiracy theory mind control stuff), she'll struggle to follow a conversation or retain information, and it's difficult to follow her train of thought. While she can acknowledge that during the events that led up to my dog's death she was suffering from psychosis, she puts it down to her poor physical health at the time and refuses to acknowledge that she's had continued issues since then. 

Yesterday I received a call from a psychiatrist letting me know my mum had been arrested on harassment allegations from her neighbours. This rang true, as I know my mum believes they're conspiring with her ex-friend. He let me know he didn't think she was well, and recommended temporarily detaining her to assess her before a longer sectioning. I'm her only immediate living relative other than a brother she's not close with, so it had to be entirely my decision. I agreed. 

Today, I received a phone call from her where she's being held and she questioned me on whether I let them do this. I said I had, and she was furious with me and has said she'll be starving herself to death. She kept insisting that her neighbours were conspiring with her ex-friend, and was frustrated that I thought she needed to be sectioned. Even though she still has this belief, she seemed lucid. Despite everything, hearing her on the other side of the phone trying to reason with me has made me question whether I'm doing the right thing. Even though cognitively I know I am, and reading this whole thing back makes it clear, it feels like I'm doing something incredibly wrong. All the reassurance in the world from my partner and friends isn't helping, because it's not their parent. 

​

TL;DR: my mum, who I live away from, started suffering with episodes of psychosis a year ago, with delusions that her ex-boyfriend, ex-friend, and neighbours are conspiring against her. The other day she was arrested for harassing her neighbours and a psychiatrist called me asking for my approval on sectioning her. I agreed, and she's furious with me. I feel like I'm doing something wrong, and I don't know how I can make myself feel like this is the right thing to do.",9.575707384403039,8.642757142857143,8.5923268921095,70.05003623188408,59.582010582010575,11.73061881757534,40.75511847250978,10.802804408421405,4.427478030825858,4160,191,709,83,46,1295,372,945,0.158,0.759,0.083,-0.9981,2,0,4,0,0,0,119.0,3,0,14,5,27,41,10,2,46,0,73,9,2,9,8,126,123,66,5,4,17,10,4,4,10,2,7,8,1,5,47,57,0,6,24,3,1,16,17,27,1,2,50,17,133,14,122,56,14,107,2,7,4,0,146,49,0,8,45,514,180,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04571667731435628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05587972065345968,0.06266728483275137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042440485988441794,0.09182246008646544,0.04821413543777641,0.0,0.0484548751694312,0.07931347023832476,0.04306160649662849,0.15719322652727638,0.0,0.13165540805318945,0.11621104558164932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3686352114588222,0.05898619154987447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814738632344673,0.0,0.05784391548581321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652110918993155,0.0,0.044420064675565335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05278752558349438,0.0,0.1055549188801118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04567869460407307,0.0,0.057517936037295075,0.13625488771236102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270163201348988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430817408400787,0.14737609226912032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04386827888291426,0.0,0.0,0.23907272842719546,0.0,0.026944955190124,0.0,0.08793099743910429,0.04325729262707771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27410038257809,0.0581269318652684,0.0,0.10370562058875717,0.0,0.051732291262458256,0.0,0.0,0.059508740139983925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16148758517195422,0.0,0.0,0.17117486517494615,0.053705724499771464,0.14171686632179406,0.04203917680047711,0.0,0.05460874812422235,0.0,0.210949044276744,0.0,0.10078456647679346,0.0,0.13662068147886944,0.1369224183144771,0.043308638464044855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0487999660229212,0.06885124472948691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051954740581493165,0.1039476457453764,0.0,0.0520743978760632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648199500155223,0.0795531187114451,0.0,0.05484885996509013,0.09679622087253972,0.0,0.04948603574198618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03494744761809967,0.03922386892585697,0.0,0.0,0.057266119789669674,0.0,0.0,0.03575447838133716,0.0,0.0,0.05661206881827002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04934874625005321,0.0,0.10369095523755734,0.11554794636720744,0.0,0.05158732261414282,0.0,0.0,0.05302600991243382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321301186458006,0.0981161627410463,0.04101321074898785,0.0,0.0,0.08219459115690664,0.04695045556351558,0.0,0.05826322395054132,0.0,0.08532404281245258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881478757068154,0.0,0.0,0.0365038939926427,0.0,0.08237311362102888,0.0,0.0,0.10783136011231087,0.0590391653977663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041452718129963706,0.09015479036944693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17131526409024467,0.03304613057409985,0.15201171110787204,0.08188698381077991,0.060145689063486565,0.0,0.048885520774709534,0.09856112292829113,0.0,0.14005972094723948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05680077656061841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046370649862093806,0.0,0.0,0.057579821491751323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277475947844565,0.06266728483275137,0.09963467066320973
mentalhealth,Fearless-Pace,2020/01/13,"Thinking of going back to my therapist, but I don't know if/how I should. So I'm kind of new to this therapy thing. 

I met with a therapist for almost 9 months last year. It was mainly about postpartum depression and anxiety that I had after my daughter but we also went through a LOT of other stuff. Working on how not to ruminate and obsess, discussing my self esteem, working through issues with my own mom, doing a TON of therapy related to trauma related to the birth and how I felt in those times, etc. 

I look back and it really did wonders for my mental health. Toward the end I was thinking ""Why am I even going to this, I feel great"". Life, for a while, was SO GOOD for a solid few months. Seriously, I was so happy and was leaving work every day excited, happy, just on cloud nine, could not wait to get home to see my family. 

Well now about 5 months after discontinuing therapy with her it is like I have fallen back into old habits once again. All of the coping skills we talked about are not working. I am now ruminating and obsessing over an entirely new subject. Life is still good but it is affected a lot because of this obsession. I feel almost like I have let myself down and I am kind of embarrassed to call this therapist up again. Is she gonna be like ""Wow, did we not just solve all of this stuff last year? Why are you back?"" 

Has anyone been BACK to a therapist again for a similar issue? Is this common? Sorry if this sounds a bit off the wall, I just don't know how this all works as this is my first experience with therapy.",3.7158379062895714,5.002537161812299,5.191960039397777,81.76762769100887,72.20388349514563,8.869058674546222,25.73251723652737,9.318704503766252,2.08553513437456,1209,38,243,27,23,407,163,309,0.10400000000000001,0.772,0.124,0.9154,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,3,1,0,7,26,20,0,4,14,0,30,3,0,4,3,48,48,20,0,3,11,2,3,3,0,2,3,1,1,1,19,15,0,1,8,0,0,4,6,7,1,2,12,6,30,13,44,31,11,44,0,1,2,0,13,10,0,6,33,188,49,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15970439814205026,0.0,0.0,0.06377132950250136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061004019707082836,0.0,0.0,0.055758930212030884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3065914603717773,0.0,0.04861126437840475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870599057660059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142764399540947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366917655430525,0.0,0.0,0.05142834867975976,0.0,0.06868347814194961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062960500634874,0.0,0.08893575305307305,0.0526702272400881,0.0,0.06718784521076106,0.0,0.0,0.0780050333807964,0.07517564225607934,0.0,0.08064202795574217,0.0,0.07656684339772563,0.0,0.0,0.06783029236418474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041663001941884034,0.0,0.09064082166049783,0.1337711385308332,0.0,0.08791815389900222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16977815867961984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476425134904499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998983617222304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16646424849317235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16608242161370398,0.08765054586435861,0.1300041727525637,0.0,0.08443748980429693,0.0,0.08154374705141346,0.11265123501255925,0.1168768205181583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696496155574239,0.0,0.0,0.13559116756927014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036329873228418,0.0,0.0,0.09339532838976564,0.19095294407174115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15403470112148251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367802057350393,0.08492486598928217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051086113660653285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354572473435996,0.0,0.08319048985517241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926699336461358,0.0,0.0,0.0636837428107849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18257583620075274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409528847826977,0.0,0.0,0.3647773212964348,0.3703561944664149,0.05297843793098842,0.10219360118179804,0.0,0.0,0.046499427120339984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716995245165204,0.07392358141088395,0.1439132971800517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647907688721247,0.2902732797627809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027051742594042
mentalhealth,dukkehjem11,2020/01/13,"too painful I don't know how to cope anymore. I wake up in the morning and I immediately feel a sinking thing in my chest, like something has been missing in my life since forever. I am alone. I guess I realized that my friends are just acquaintances and they prefer other people, I am simply the background friend that's useful for some reason. I don't know what to do anymore, I guess I'm incapable of forming deep, meaningful connections with people because of my fear of abandonment/of rejection and consequently I try to overextend myself, trying to please everybody. The only person that shows me affection in a meaningful way is my boyfriend, but I suppose he's going to leave me soon, since I am so fucking boring. I am not enough. Sorry for the rant, I am in a lot pain.",3.899426948890035,6.0842495570469834,5.035704697986579,79.37335054207539,73.56375838926175,8.074548270521424,30.25348477026329,8.841846274778883,2.752845740836345,620,28,110,13,13,204,95,149,0.162,0.727,0.111,-0.8599,0,1,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,5,10,1,1,7,0,12,6,2,4,0,22,22,6,0,1,3,0,1,1,2,0,3,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,8,1,0,1,3,7,0,0,1,1,23,3,17,21,4,10,0,2,0,1,5,7,1,4,2,79,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16697094523162032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197655006815065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827565331198096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657901368083627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181412591936943,0.0815155507997267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491098492209687,0.14904140624420156,0.0,0.0,0.09162265247905596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3551947513697975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17719997140823746,0.0,0.0,0.17070425097248473,0.0,0.0,0.1138714849204676,0.07876189493884601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370599052153434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261187804562368,0.3430899484763209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22353346892751072,0.14076741528752496,0.0,0.17696653257171074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16575668945149372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26671874596193823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411179658402735,0.0,0.1804678854640308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10710461177448967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21890988694088664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392386863048872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279655954357527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ProReactDev,2020/01/13,"Am I too sensitive? Whenever I get home and the house is dirty (unwashed dishes, crumbs on the floor/tables, empty packets lying around, clothes not put away), my mood instantly changes to be super upset & uptight & I can't feel calm until I clean it up. I clean up after myself regularly but my partner says he doesn't see dirt like I do & he just wont do it (i've asked many times). Is there something wrong with me? Should I see a doctor? I don't know what to do. I want to be able to care less about it so that I can enjoy my life.",2.1733333333333316,3.4228117719298297,3.737719298245616,90.825701754386,76.01754385964912,6.470175438596491,22.3157894736842,6.937597516519254,0.4769894736842106,418,11,94,4,9,139,83,114,0.146,0.688,0.165,0.6421,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,6,9,0,2,3,0,14,3,0,0,0,11,22,4,0,2,3,0,1,1,1,2,2,1,3,1,5,3,1,1,2,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,0,4,15,5,13,18,1,9,0,0,2,0,5,5,0,0,4,58,20,1,0.18597186891631126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6045013268177916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16555439166136166,0.17385859307980187,0.0,0.17472669266644547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18961071473551955,0.0,0.1967335783236364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19035008813866727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403296475352617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716262580294677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18654494774241087,0.0,0.0,0.2145865676683446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220527557186364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135743085715515,0.09085646135056563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18854628564210602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869530940357545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478922945265051,0.0,0.0,0.2963910033345268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14317023045523947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844169231125447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969102665181762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20333104430690854,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TetrisShoes,2020/01/13,"I have this feeling like I want to just shut down when things aren't going my way I've had this feeling for years. Ever since I was a kid. It's this feeling where, if I'm dreading something in the future (which is very often,) I don't want to enjoy anything. I don't want to play video games or read or do anything fun. I got into the habit of avoiding my friends when I'm dreading the future for this reason. Why is this? Im just making things harder for myself. Instead of just dreading the future, I dread the future and mope. I feel like a child throwing a tantrum. It's like a throw all of my toys out the window because I'm angry about the future. Why do I do this? Is anybody else like this? I feel like I just shut down when things aren't going my way.",0.949262422360249,2.9156876956521742,2.406424689440996,95.7321215062112,81.98136645962734,4.025,20.00038819875776,3.1291,-0.5439785714285716,593,16,130,0,16,192,79,161,0.17600000000000002,0.662,0.161,-0.8178,0,1,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,12,15,1,5,11,0,13,0,0,2,2,24,28,7,0,4,7,0,5,5,1,0,0,0,1,2,13,3,0,1,6,5,0,4,4,6,0,0,3,5,16,9,15,25,1,24,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,4,15,84,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509874826590436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296201798414523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739340522143094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13794414008177172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3855405608638099,0.3268360994925973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178204036445932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733374723131902,0.0,0.12196743780300065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16472516520498895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3725167143141107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179431379097484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525403390004752,0.0,0.0,0.156794443246948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261488070708129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11740123496774907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30394081882184243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258277042282852,0.26984370883924325,0.24209332796773256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752133829819268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820440157908132
mentalhealth,angelrnia,2020/01/13,"Therapy...Am I doing it wrong?! Maybe it's just me, but does anyone/has anyone ever been to therapy and felt worse after? 
Personal scenario: I've been ""diagnosed"" as borderline, PTSD, bipolar, ADD, and generalized anxiety. I refuse therapy anymore. I've tried it 3 times, with 3 different therapists, each for at least 2-6 months. I would go to my appointments, vent, cry, do the work/ homework requested of me, etc., but after every session I felt ridiculous. I felt this way, primarily because I know that there are people in the world WAY worse off than myself (I'm kind of able to keep a job as an RN, I have full custody of my son, I'm not an addict, etc.). So, I felt like these appointments with these therapists were just a designated crying session for me. I can honestly say that I NEVER once felt better after a therapy visit...anyone else feel this way? If so, have you returned to therapy and had a better outcome?",4.625226373626376,6.125472445714286,6.1125714285714325,75.21496703296704,70.25714285714285,9.727472527472527,30.60439560439561,10.035473477838034,3.3082835164835167,718,30,128,19,13,244,111,175,0.18,0.777,0.043,-0.9764,2,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,0,3,6,7,1,0,8,0,11,3,0,0,2,26,22,10,0,2,6,1,6,1,0,1,3,1,1,1,9,7,0,2,7,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,9,7,17,5,20,12,5,17,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,9,84,26,5,0.10101824049544764,0.0,0.0,0.11012479299236344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772786774799342,0.0,0.10018295016052538,0.1412686050909987,0.10350512517094704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615797817886154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786848491159687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22192758746621985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253138768562207,0.0,0.1055425606812548,0.0,0.0,0.08840174300747597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438777755644597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22532408223668374,0.0,0.091376781931546,0.08511222449840151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051077857653010386,0.0,0.4849667632559694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05741099403982866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10024501632151507,0.08978965366013468,0.0,0.1051949523703413,0.055516983121077126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049352409677654106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014864003520493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063179579323519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779114946470761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758112924893684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003332857686644,0.08820523114544797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808491729324265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033375941726485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4620926473340016,0.2345799263908414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05890454840006627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858475428494988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405507318796897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354248220212349,0.0,0.20589243458917766,0.0717604596930534,0.11044758787270684,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rainandshowers,2020/01/13,"Today is just that kind of day. Thoughts? Sometimes I have days where I just feel sort of sad for no reason, and I can’t shake it off. Today is one of those days. It doesn’t feel like sadness, really, more like a melancholic loneliness or isolated loneliness, or a sort of emptiness. I try and distract myself by talking to people and being around my friends, but eventually I’m gonna have to go home alone and feel it.

 It’s my first day back at college, so I’m away from my family, but I still feel like this at home sometimes. And it’s weird, but I like being alone a lot. I’m an introvert and I like doing my own thing. But sometimes I just feel like this, and I don’t know what it is or how to fix it. I just try and get through it.",1.7796153846153828,3.2176602948717985,3.3105128205128236,92.70115384615384,77.46153846153845,6.594871794871796,22.89743589743589,7.321109707123232,0.6461435897435894,570,17,132,7,13,188,82,156,0.159,0.7240000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.1098,0,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,10,14,0,2,4,0,11,0,0,2,0,32,24,17,0,0,11,0,5,6,1,1,0,0,2,0,14,9,0,0,8,0,0,2,4,6,0,2,1,5,15,8,16,20,3,17,0,3,0,0,2,6,0,6,15,90,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26579922940388706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423096881945932,0.0,0.0,0.12055977000437505,0.09866926389497416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3310201335296602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12096757808003955,0.0,0.3244092940383258,0.2750130052855516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091479359738078,0.0,0.0,0.09913881404336802,0.0,0.06704129541435518,0.0,0.07292655135625742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25742850908574616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13362432099908725,0.07052067619513719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3761406085129586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909208526630844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695216389157191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896012372764943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220433184993645,0.1319331344253626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807318284125571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247558783270384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313781939030588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524933255834087,0.0,0.0,0.10187082207991888,0.0,0.0,0.2432625043624589,0.0,0.0,0.17424013254840415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,n0sens,2020/01/13,"Closed Telegram Support Group for People with Mental Health Conditions like Depression, Anxiety, Bipolar, BPD etc. www.t.me/huddlehumans

Hey all! It seems most of you guys here know that the mental health scene and stigma is still very strong and discriminating in our modern society and it goes to show how hard someone with a mental health condition like depression, anxiety, bipolar, personality disorder etc. has to go through just to find help or even just someone to talk to about their feelings.

I've had enough of the discrimination and marginalisation towards people with mental health conditions and hence, what I've been working on the past few months is creating a closed non-profit telegram support group for you guys of all backgrounds to come together to support one another, as well as advice each other when one is going through a tough time.

We are about 200 members strong as of today.

The group is a caring, close-knit, non-judgemental and well managed community filled with people being able to freely express themselves in a safe space and share any sorts of problems or issues that is currently affecting them.

Remember you are never alone in the fight against mental health and if you wish to join this closed telegram group please do so with the link below or search huddlehumans in the telegram app.

www.t.me/huddlehumans",11.518961038961036,10.815022281385284,9.457142857142859,64.66285714285716,55.623376623376615,12.555844155844154,42.21212121212121,11.567385478589935,5.033775757575757,1101,49,167,24,11,330,139,231,0.083,0.728,0.19,0.9779,1,1,0,0,1,0,27.0,2,4,2,3,12,17,1,0,12,0,12,7,0,2,3,41,23,18,0,3,6,0,2,2,0,0,7,0,0,3,7,19,0,1,6,1,0,4,1,5,2,2,2,2,8,12,36,20,8,24,0,2,0,0,21,11,0,7,11,108,15,2,0.09104150099236913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896470109500716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429153834798323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061911342620906175,0.09546495184520294,0.13929299813523194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466358344105927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928228778596931,0.0,0.0,0.07842419173950863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15682782280061866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434144760300222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940702074523638,0.2030706786808483,0.060132052772614464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04603331839277278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321028255116918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348196613235414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18029079901368286,0.0,0.0,0.08155530251594696,0.0,0.0,0.4838642913118561,0.0,0.0,0.06102319904270755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502367371149684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050034028004463764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895655740205521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4587420990537396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266845750552484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021681809582092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338415448998853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690941425777958,0.1893501407822589,0.07949392703214161,0.0,0.09993622883998067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711442102642031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313227314440046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288076322380579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542783366999937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270586029560709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099384493066277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317570990690145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053087031365007385,0.0,0.08629669773746826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511877295601048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16371448607372888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469323310614427,0.0,0.0,0.06627929702148833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,venom12181,2020/01/13,"What are the best ways to boost self esteem/confidence? I’m 28 and have extremely low self esteem/self confidence. What are some ways that I can work on improving it? 

I would go to therapy to work on this but i can’t afford it. 

Any tips would be appreciated!",1.3810256410256407,3.852386846153848,3.4476923076923067,85.78064102564106,84.38461538461539,8.082051282051282,20.2051282051282,8.841846274778883,1.599258974358975,204,6,43,6,6,69,36,52,0.031,0.718,0.251,0.898,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,0,0,5,10,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,5,7,2,6,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,27,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15341642900384894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367543508020815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821425798769606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7060531932310795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579944263741403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3581431757937638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284804572300956,0.0,0.0,0.32052098195749235,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fogn6,2020/01/13,"Talking to people Am I the only one that hates when society, media, woke people tries to push people with ""mental health"" problems to get out there and talk to someone....I see the same piece of shit people who have caused some of my issues posting that ""R U OK?"" Campaign crap....like pretending theyre good people and care when they know they have fucked you over. And heres the fucking kicker.....they want you to talk and open up, TO THEM, so they can automatically judge you in a negative way and later use that information against you.

You cant even talk you your loved ones about whats going....because when you bring up dark, negative shit in your head.....you can see it hurts them, and that just piles up the guilt....and other times they get upset and angry

Have you tried talking to a professional? You feel like a fucking dickhead when I do, As you're talking theres a voice like ""stop being a fucking baby"" ""fucking softy"" ""fucking get over it and move on"" so you feel like more of a loser and dont want to talk, also this guy gets paid to pretend to care. Just another fake person in the world.

I think after a while of this, you come to the conclusion there is absolutely nobody you can talk to....you are alone with your issues that only yourself can somehow pull off a miracle.....to fix.....but at some point...maybe its just too late....its irresiversible damage...

So everyday you're trapped inside a box that is getting smaller and smaller",4.283184309695102,5.800847787769786,4.683648509763618,85.06164268585133,71.12230215827337,7.165741692360397,25.8280232956492,7.62386473244151,1.3001721137375817,1127,35,219,13,21,356,152,278,0.182,0.7340000000000001,0.084,-0.985,0,2,0,0,0,0,75.0,0,15,6,2,20,23,9,1,15,1,15,10,2,2,0,34,43,20,0,3,3,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,0,2,14,15,0,1,6,2,1,5,4,15,0,2,2,5,25,8,33,40,5,31,0,3,2,7,34,14,8,3,13,140,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647085367092139,0.0,0.066767226236928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754694245461593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05089496034873732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702480122680278,0.08576761812083322,0.0,0.07191956910428726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978501028455598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05514460817304167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443048885337287,0.11929108744210425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4631130624207571,0.218101386474484,0.0,0.0,0.07002776906124597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266860193854883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824294645846805,0.08568521623301212,0.08874636910938996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937817793009416,0.0,0.0,0.1742845292110131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04588412905274555,0.0,0.09418078454108908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223675463294617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535332708489229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387730797072328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841386652820808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873706032567254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315048365039593,0.1269963914990421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894085832623614,0.07290057891255354,0.0,0.0,0.07892539500258756,0.0,0.07996070458669582,0.0,0.0,0.07988901745777642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306204568189672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714033493173602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980169562488017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5368512351785854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053497263921743005,0.0,0.0,0.04868391163633351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336897431181693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072108881291289,0.0,0.0,0.09848957785513217,0.06627077700547025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Trimbaaa,2020/01/13,"I have been buttfucked by an asstronaut to the moon and back [help] I have been buttfucked by an asstronaut to the moon and back

He drew a constellation and left the Milky Way in my ass crack

He enlarged by rectum and turned it from Pluto to Jupiter

And successfully colonized the entirety of my sphincter",8.479999999999997,8.121325070175441,8.174385964912283,70.29736842105265,61.45614035087719,13.2140350877193,38.29824561403509,12.45797560212912,4.93899298245614,247,11,45,8,3,79,36,57,0.06,0.8859999999999999,0.055,-0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,7,0,4,2,2,0,0,5,5,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,1,9,3,0,5,0,0,0,1,3,2,1,0,2,32,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6381290646685222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781266556122974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4508353398649485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4513373847684213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293613846559031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hxxrahoop,2020/01/13,"Mom said I had ""attitude problems"" when I barely spoke and stayed in bed all day I was having suicidal thoughts and I shut down completely so I don't act on it

This ""attitude problem""  has been going on for YEARS. The thing is I've told her about being depressed and self harming. 

Yet it's just an attitude problem. She gets so mad at me when Im like that. Fuck this fucking shit I'm never gonna get fucking help and I can't help that people aren't seeing that I'm not fucking ok 

What do u want?? Want me to YELL hey I'm suicidal!!! Help me!!! That's gonna make me a fucking attention whore I'm fucking sick of being so fucking empty.",-0.4696543597800478,1.768209253731346,1.9545561665357447,93.61090730557736,94.5223880597015,4.910604870384918,21.231736056559306,6.5966054737557815,0.5429313432835818,496,19,107,7,19,168,86,134,0.318,0.594,0.08800000000000001,-0.9905,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,8,17,9,0,3,1,12,10,1,1,2,16,36,9,2,5,2,1,0,1,0,2,1,3,1,1,10,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,15,0,0,7,4,12,2,9,25,1,15,0,1,1,8,11,6,8,0,7,60,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064464162220373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420813069423979,0.0,0.09910628385582784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7446374413784346,0.12023460105513695,0.0,0.06539472987845238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23137919196159615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429115919378715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056215495894077726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680753116666589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476405354828805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874608830736133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977236209489517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303082214878437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945423364959313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169280303964833,0.0,0.12003906215483995,0.0,0.11811372257769966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264517797909345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517273269878908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764448197712932,0.0,0.0,0.0913496493186437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995061238005774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573796220325798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409881116225782
mentalhealth,Tiburonsin_,2020/01/13,"I don't know how to title this, story of my life and shitty issues I guess. I always had problems socializing and I've also suffered from bullying for a long time, I felt empty a lot of time and also I cried sometimes for no real reason. I have though of myself as a really paranoid person since a really long time and I had friends but I didn't feel like they were real friends, though I didn't really care about it at that time, there were some special cases where I did wanted to be with that people but I had problems trusting them which I think lead to a conflict that ended in my losing contact with some of them. Two years ago I finally entered high school and started trying to socialize, and it worked, I started making friends, but something was wrong, I still didn't feel like I could trust them, I felt like they were only with me because they though I was miserable and that they talked shit about me when I wasn't there, and I did know it wasn't true, ""but what if it is? 'cause it probably is."" time passed, my bond with my new friends grew stronger and my worries too, 'til this new girl arrived, at the beginning I didn't talk too much to her, and I don't even remember why I did, though probably one of the factors that caused that is because one day I heard her say that my friends told her I was really funny, and that really made me happy. Some time after I was talking with a friend and I don't even remember the topic, but he asked the question, ""have you felt in love with someone?"" and my obvious answer was no, but it made me think, and I finally noticed that I felt in love with that girl, I always put her before everyone else, I spent most of my time with her, and with time my feelings grew stronger, but my worries also did and worse than ever. But with time they started getting lower, I loved all of the time I spent with her and I didn't feel bad or anxious even for a bit when I was with her. With time I really started to believe that she liked me, and I wasn't the only one, some people truly though that we were a couple, but life can't be that good, and I discovered that another guy liked her and she knew, I got really anxious about that and the next weekend I told her that I loved her, it was not reciprocal. I remember how that moment felt so unreal, ""This can't be happening to me, life can't give me something good and then take it away."" I was hanging out with my parents and my stepsister when that happened, and I started trying not to cry so they didn't notice, but my stepsister saw me, and she started to giggle which made me feel worse, when I calmed down a little I made a really shitty excuse for them to bring me home and then leave again, and they obviously didn't believed me, but they leaved me at home. My grandparents also live with us, and they had visitors, I literally couldn't talk without starting to cry anymore, and I wanted to be alone, so I climbed up to the second floor from the yard and entered through the window of my bedroom, to then start crying for hours until I felt asleep, and it was like that for some time, I finally started getting ""over"" it and trying to get rid of my feelings, and it kinda worked for a time, though I still couldn't take it and every now and then a week I exploded and started crying, worse than before, I was happy and then sad and then happy again. Instead of trying to get ride of my feelings I just tried to lower their importance, if that makes any sense, and worked, but now when I cried I didn't had a real reason, it has been a cycle when I feel really good, like I have a bulletproof heart and nothing can hurt me anymore, and then I don't even know how but I start feeling really sad as if nothing really made sense and I did not deserved this, and after finishing crying I feel  like I have a bulletproof heart and nothing can hurt me anymore. Sometimes I feel like doing this, and then that is really stupid, and I should do something else, but that is also really stupid, so I should go back to the first thing. months later, some days ago, some friends came to my house and I had a really good time and we agreed to hang out the next weekend too, and when they leaved, I started feeling sad with no reason, then not that bad and I started to play stardew valley with some friends, though I started to feel way worse until the point that I just couldn't talk anymore and just had to disconnect, and then I felt asleep, next day, I waked up still sad, and played videogames to distract myself and feel a little less sad, worked for a pair of hours, started crying later. Had enough, got out of my bedroom and sit in the couch 'cause my parents just arrived and wanted to watch a movie, then we were going to eat, I reached the point were I wanted to leave really bad, and thankfully my grandparents asked them if they could help them to move some things, I went to my bedroom to start crying again for no reason. I heard a sound coming from my phone, I calmed down and looked at it, the girl I loved just messaged me when I most needed it, and I started to smile, then I noticed that I still love her and I just can't forget about her, and I hate myself for that, I would had thrown the phone if it wasn't so noisy because I don't want anyone to notice, then punching a journal that I had where I wrote how I felt until I noticed that I started bleeding, and then I tore it to pieces. I've reached the point where I started to love crying each night, I love feeling miserable and that people talk shit about me, I love that she rejected me and thinking it was deserved, though I have no idea why and I hate it. I started to think that maybe I should seek help and really needed to vent, so I just messaged a friend telling him just this and then cried until falling asleep, I waked up but didn't feel like crying, I just felt empty and lonely, I regretted really hard messaging him that, ""nobody I know should have that information and I'm not gonna seek for help"" I tried to delete the message and I noticed I couldn't, but it wasn't such a big deal, he has been my friend for a really long time, and we know a lot about each other and he is probably the person that I most trust but I don't know him in real life, so he really can't do anything with that information. I told him that I was exaggerating. I felt happy again and then cried that night, and then here I am writing this at 5:30 AM. He saw the message some minutes ago and I started to get really anxious since he hasn't responded, I know he will, I know he cares a lot, we are best friends and our conversations are always really friendly and kind, but I still feel anxious. I'm tired of this shit, I don't want to feel that way anymore, at least at this moment and hopefully my opinion doesn't change again like it did when I tore away my journal, I don't know what to do or what mental illness I have if I even have one, I'm not even sure what was the point of this post, though at least I know that I feel released after writing this and that I'm too stubborn now to do some real damage to myself outside of some accidental cuts or try suicide, though I once tried to. Thanks for reading, sorry for making this extremely long.",8.982457588262264,5.818289292984872,8.558248968363138,76.86636474094455,62.53507565337003,11.564034846400736,35.856441999082996,9.21078282632365,2.9467445575424125,5648,169,1175,68,60,1811,386,1454,0.17600000000000002,0.6659999999999999,0.158,-0.8363,6,4,3,0,0,1,147.0,7,1,18,9,83,89,9,3,49,0,109,27,10,20,6,285,244,165,1,29,43,2,30,11,12,7,7,4,8,6,82,109,1,2,56,6,2,19,45,31,0,7,81,38,220,58,138,146,29,179,0,15,4,9,122,36,3,32,131,844,302,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061236353722077065,0.0,0.0,0.02384911128301051,0.0,0.09207374167036296,0.05748112808978515,0.0,0.0,0.015659204693399337,0.02414590216760612,0.0,0.10405618840263778,0.11418338381629725,0.016101070422114866,0.0,0.018949325605727048,0.0,0.043054424563275,0.0,0.0432694011572096,0.01770640389079741,0.057679952310102936,0.04211128449318025,0.0,0.03918869976550492,0.051887269677081085,0.02416550082240316,0.0,0.025139608460039882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026336846147915545,0.04695528745146328,0.07096546577972639,0.024359598386690814,0.01983579130052128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03677050085145797,0.025479027113741625,0.32882417333508057,0.04455168673271413,0.023739909366682424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023562452551703545,0.038472342763683914,0.0,0.020395158941697304,0.023793130171105046,0.0,0.09125501885168573,0.02082931306468745,0.019401308868999816,0.02200336267288406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212204964930504,0.08225275623810567,0.22109608861897115,0.07567512495090241,0.0,0.019586823311626804,0.0,0.0,0.21348798765642096,0.0,0.060153497001476125,0.02208967431895896,0.02617364155166553,0.07725609202834738,0.03683372043481538,0.0,0.02536692578702408,0.022800430475064845,0.04072554331135892,0.0980510235272674,0.020627741571510882,0.04546895029764477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05457440364643454,0.04630370095704225,0.02432937532168251,0.04619607945722402,0.022871087152914416,0.0453540726109126,0.02657015976693241,0.049301932876472686,0.02599477155176853,0.0,0.024034289911597773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023979161329933826,0.1265508149216915,0.0,0.0,0.09752941560648876,0.0,0.0,0.06505883312962378,0.12374855482292353,0.04615836913089602,0.0203333343741985,0.08151296816193225,0.019336948498172263,0.025761413508776868,0.0,0.058730402359258575,0.18704555653268864,0.10894390393745608,0.04611226607162188,0.0,0.02313379788669557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023205881592806715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018379996340902312,0.024474142867700808,0.01692755404451643,0.03414857753171578,0.0,0.04447939658769276,0.07346868555165521,0.04321871119046937,0.0,0.06628531571011623,0.15729890585639647,0.0,0.02452308971284864,0.06241498404941094,0.0350262654388474,0.0,0.0,0.051137696696807386,0.0,0.0,0.04789223569886094,0.040212717818143694,0.0,0.0,0.08707213811653422,0.0,0.022053578298340832,0.0,0.07448126387727318,0.04406761323050501,0.0,0.023148576499577016,0.025795600683997843,0.0,0.02303331242741429,0.13104929708020516,0.30978649197186703,0.09470269757767304,0.0,0.0,0.07825558164127408,0.0,0.0,0.018312059028507115,0.0,0.023304635301122218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091090312998331,0.03809647867110865,0.0,0.0,0.046946418365095964,0.019510770982105897,0.05318211580153921,0.04554874376503038,0.025776931893574682,0.3422724150701335,0.0,0.09194728304875703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02518788913719067,0.0,0.021702751302059082,0.0,0.03462699827112882,0.11104977261113784,0.020126683729446117,0.04240048474674445,0.0,0.0,0.030596338801221663,0.05901929477702296,0.2262399014038357,0.0,0.20140914140719554,0.02646624215717579,0.0,0.06601008801865217,0.0,0.12507101154304914,0.0,0.022494112144181917,0.0,0.027698743159947227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149181381125872,0.036555650106794936,0.018470935383846056,0.0,0.0,0.021346334759750615,0.04155671788829967,0.0,0.0,0.02219728433397173,0.0,0.0670559567961059,0.046770236976909005,0.09386625107724683,0.01635777764347457,0.025176498191451083,0.0,0.01482868517363916
mentalhealth,An0nymous-T,2020/01/13,"There is an Arabic saying and it goes like this: “You want to die? Then throw yourself into the sea and you’ll see yourself fighting to survive. You do not want to kill yourself, rather you want to kill something inside of you”",5.064469696969695,6.102184386363637,4.611818181818184,88.12106060606064,68.77272727272728,5.866666666666667,28.303030303030305,3.1291,0.8190848484848487,179,6,34,0,3,54,31,44,0.11599999999999999,0.633,0.251,0.6679,0,0,1,0,2,1,4.0,0,5,0,1,2,4,3,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,7,3,3,4,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,2,5,1,6,6,0,3,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,0,2,23,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100733640905972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6610836647407828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459626472197628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375918068083457,0.0,0.0,0.2380789148935952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23000572033812935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5286622125170356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sweetnstuff,2020/01/13,"Is it Anxiety or is there something really wrong? As someone living with anxiety I know I can think the worst in any situation.  Today I'm going for an MRI because I've had a lot of problems with my hands and feet causing pain, getting weak amd straight up being clumsy.  I've done some other tests which have all been normal but today I am spending a boatload of money to rule out MS.  My head is all over the place as part of me thinks that maybe this answers all of my questions about what's going on yet the other part of me screams that I'm wasting money because it must be all in my head.  I hate the process of figuring out what if anything is wrong.  I hate coming to the realization that my head is simply manifesting symptoms.  Does anyone else go through this?  

Everyone says go with your gut when you think something is wrong and keep pushing the doctor but having anxiety sometimes means wasting thousands of dollars to he told it's all in your head.  I hate having anxiety, not that anyone chooses to have it but I wish I could get a better grip on it.  Here's to hoping I get some sort of answers this week.",4.305067567567569,5.533211792792795,5.129358108108106,83.00052364864867,70.7117117117117,7.351801801801803,29.64076576576577,7.645422480735847,1.8720171171171167,886,35,169,10,16,288,127,222,0.21100000000000002,0.738,0.051,-0.9895,0,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,1,6,13,3,0,10,0,19,12,7,1,6,41,41,10,0,7,6,0,2,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,17,8,0,1,10,0,4,6,1,11,0,1,4,4,19,2,30,33,11,22,0,0,0,0,7,11,0,8,5,119,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795755587427503,0.0,0.30579248657656605,0.0,0.0,0.13975031481742242,0.10239269948577012,0.08223596784412933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121835900988811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883822130931884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265824904680602,0.0,0.08608303691079781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797880037672456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228519196593626,0.08745164155719988,0.1022656870279309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348081636864252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548982707242804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15663188700383895,0.0,0.22717586786898736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959880904774787,0.4102384774302757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992555633272198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882463558175732,0.0,0.0,0.054920312010487964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882422660601256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495907418870659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039567099675108,0.10885583523766562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791267416589597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633527120933753,0.0,0.0,0.2164344107949078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440823757225644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956219471867662,0.0,0.0,0.11194731846964087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401934577767869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947036895988416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232836501307952,0.0,0.0,0.08467251914304054,0.1538659072776832,0.09883584000660817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386817536070957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19209821480399708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18944873136313148,0.09548982707242804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015985792221941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149174922927098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32778164333313425,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,classicfuckups,2020/01/13,"Continuously fucking up instead of getting better As the title says.. i’m only fucking up more and more and don’t know how to get better
I’ve been struggling with depression and anxiety for about 2 years now, and It’s only getting worse, especially as of lately.
I’ll try to keep it short as there’s pretty much no way to sum everything up in a reddit post.
When I was young I had a great relationship with my father, seen him as my hero and all that. Our family was doing great financially and all was fine. My father was almost always away with “business”, and he was also away for a few months at a time now and then, but I don’t remember this as I was little and probably didn’t pay attention because I was used to it. At this pont my father was “living in another country, working”. We used to talk on the phone and everything seemed normal, but then again I wasn’t paying much attention. That was until I was about 12 or so. I went on to find out he was actually in prison and those times he was away for “business”, yeah, he was doing illegal stuff, hence why our family was doing well with money. But that stopped around the same time as well. This time he was in for 3 years, 3 years which were vital for me growing up, as I was entering the “teenage” phase of my life and definitely needed a father figure. These 3 years changed everything. I went on to see who he actually was and we kind of fell apart in my head but on the outside I was pretending not to be mad at him for some reason. The money was now gone, and my mother was working 2 jobs to be able to provide for me and my sister, who was about 3 at the time. Her second job was cleaning offices for various companies and I couldn’t leave her alone on this so at about 13 I think, I started going with her, waking up at 5:30 and going to clean offices before, and sometimes, after school. Time went by and he got out and came home. On his first day home he made me cry. I don’t recall the reason, but I remember crying and wishing he went back. He started working again, so my mother and I stopped cleaning offices. He tried to “reconcile” with me even though I never told him I was mad at him, but I guess he noticed our relationship was not the same. But this was in vain. He was not the hero anymore, he was just a regular dad whom I wished to be away from as much as possible. Time went by and he went in again, but for a quite short period of time, I can’t remember exactly. When he got out he moved to another country by himself to work and support us financially (as our country is a shithole). I was around 18 at this point and finished high school. He kept trying to convince me that It’s great there and I should go visit him, and if I wanted to I could make some money (legally) myself to buy a car (didn’t have one at the time so it sounded pretty tempting). I didn’t want to, just because it meant spending time with him, which I hated. However, for some reason I once accepted. I went there and met him, and we went to his place to get some rest. The second day I went to work with him (he worked as a driver, and had daily routes to another country nearby). Everything was alright. That was until we returned. We were going home but were stopped at the border for a routine check (he was driving a sprinter and this was back in 2017 when the immigrant crisis in Europe was full on). The authorities said they need to keep him because he had a warrant from another country. It was my second day with him and I was left alone in a country where I had no one (except my brother but he was about 600km away). He told me to wait for him until the morning (as it happened during nighttime), so I could drive back to get him. Of course he didn’t come back. I had no money. Just the sprinter and enough gas to get back to his place. I Called my brother and he came to get me (we get along great). Ended up staying about a month in that country trying to get a job to support my mom and sister since he was gone again, but I couldn’t do it. It was depressing for me. All of that experience in that country was horrible so I went back home (note that I hadn’t spoken to him for about 2 months since it happened because he wasn’t allowed to call). The sprinter was a leasing and, not paying it for 3 months led to the leasing company wanting him to return the vehicle. When we first spoke he was mad at me for not staying there to pay the lease so that he could get back to working when he got out. He told me countless times that now he had to start all over again because of me. Eventually he stopped, got out and started working again in that country for a while, before returning home “to be with us”. Fast forward to this late spring. He was wanted again. Turned himself in and he’s still there as of now. For the first time in my life I told him that I resented him for everything he did and that he fucked me up big time and I’m depressed and have mental issues and he replies by telling me he did a lot for us and that I don’t need Any help because I’m a Champion (he calls me that sometimes because I practiced martial arts for about 6 years and had countless trophies including many national championships under my belt, no pun intended). I Felt relieved but my mental health is getting worse as days pass and I don’t know what to do about it. He fucked me up big time. I never learned how to be a man but he always wanted me to be in his absence, and this is now affecting my 2 Year old relationship with my girlfriend with whom I want to spend the rest of my days with. She’s the most wonderful person I have ever met and has helped me enormously but I still can’t get my shit together. I feel like everything’s falling apart for me. My dreams don’t really matter anymore and I just want to be well for her, but don’t know how. I don’t want to drag her down along with me, she deserves way better. 
I was the bravest and most ambitious person I knew. I was positive, Happy, outgoing, socially active, all of that. Now I don’t know who I am anymore and It’s scary. 
The worst part? He doesn’t understand the impact that all of this shit had on me and doesn’t seem to me he ever will. 

I guess this was more of a venting post.

TL;DR - daddy issues fucked me up big time and i’m a fuck up now",3.6563845486111113,4.558740480468753,4.808072916666671,85.92241319444445,71.9296875,7.782638888888887,27.112847222222207,8.058125698181469,1.5563930555555552,4885,165,1030,67,90,1611,405,1280,0.10099999999999999,0.79,0.109,0.5097,5,2,0,0,0,0,132.0,14,0,1,18,69,42,13,1,50,2,106,13,4,14,11,201,207,106,0,21,27,12,2,1,1,2,3,4,8,3,54,85,0,8,26,3,12,31,33,19,3,8,98,8,146,23,193,95,29,208,0,3,2,6,131,78,8,15,96,727,200,20,0.03447903146066244,0.0,0.06729312209104821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03452576952207778,0.0714197565228383,0.0,0.027572869002160792,0.05737863246578695,0.0,0.0,0.023446923729618603,0.14461708307455368,0.0263763646941476,0.0,0.10258180325054447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061387295958311085,0.0,0.0,0.16197092518801584,0.18558572850755514,0.0,0.14712668288933975,0.0,0.05867823254472378,0.0,0.0,0.09148170425455257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10562083832446736,0.07886965334442192,0.0,0.0,0.03647424352895995,0.02970063262127217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258610311104363,0.0,0.07574719409789697,0.11118061456511144,0.0,0.08909021782334654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030538187955420106,0.035626056324938565,0.0,0.02277307510027725,0.0623765158359464,0.0,0.0,0.18592518153636428,0.03372710877595103,0.06500752461178891,0.0,0.017433634285490718,0.024631826964733483,0.03310527723640512,0.0,0.0315132101147239,0.08798353964045426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19125185398602795,0.21616645042382812,0.0,0.07838091259474513,0.0,0.11030412471423284,0.15205301562821674,0.07596508070859548,0.0,0.060979387303827515,0.03670357012486001,0.0,0.03404090535147295,0.03538543347945688,0.03664959813048549,0.0,0.0,0.046221136002582666,0.036428989768376316,0.17292639901717102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197430182266075,0.10264535556862817,0.061293094756075875,0.0,0.03590460548996925,0.07579509594483365,0.0,0.07778769857705747,0.036508315937710624,0.037461568566294234,0.0,0.04870711917353221,0.016844713168529403,0.03455704749015445,0.030445616464904224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02931283956602217,0.0,0.032624893236182784,0.02301502123405925,0.03495632620313488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694935083152021,0.0,0.0,0.04038142493177578,0.11008333585101196,0.036645753881016464,0.07603816599537927,0.07669729483757973,0.05318470925465837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0337821302399106,0.0,0.03925460584344602,0.0361799435205885,0.03671904323175024,0.04672776808418529,0.05244571422099153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03733743111480965,0.0,0.0,0.06021152070642044,0.07204649877725497,0.0,0.03259382933818086,0.038869927402223815,0.06604276250943095,0.0701551408621081,0.037174227504077215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036672694066286496,0.0,0.0,0.02208815043975897,0.10635056044842504,0.0,0.1110527291143135,0.11717406407831947,0.0,0.032797454537848006,0.02741910970450909,0.0,0.06978924117165639,0.027475324058896248,0.06277683059985655,0.0,0.0,0.07078446063474853,0.057042822241479926,0.0,0.0,0.035147030527328066,0.0,0.0,0.06820128748229352,0.0,0.09761774372183156,0.0735001199119089,0.05506999812573128,0.11530405667977466,0.0,0.036044969883013166,0.0394702419864546,0.0,0.07825279261310254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027712939445581383,0.030136193221447432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0220927711577211,0.033875473350496364,0.0,0.3015750077660761,0.0,0.0,0.13178476850838186,0.0,0.09363599639489484,0.03750328532607718,0.0,0.03589388771890272,0.12442208866801525,0.059557625793278876,0.0,0.0,0.16269300861120356,0.05473570061332279,0.0,0.0,0.09300237014505187,0.3196240759466873,0.031111963022967527,0.0,0.07929836917534508,0.0,0.0373910388420767,0.2008091643731603,0.0,0.07027415736896105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322019492729428
mentalhealth,sackboy90,2020/01/13,"My Mind Has Gone Completely Blank *URGENT* Very recently I had a sudden massive up in my mental state after a certain something happened (which I shall not detail as this is the wrong sub to do so), but after 3-4 weeks of this general happiness and absence of social anxiety, after a few fights with my parents and just general stress, my mind feels like it has gone completely white, I can barely think properly and my depression has come back, I've become suddenly very guilty about menial things I've done in the past, as well as this my attention span has become extremely low.

All this is making me so stressed and I feel like killing myself, it's becoming too much for me to handle after all the shit I went through in 2019 just for it all to come back in a different form, I don't know what to do anymore. If anyone can maybe tell me what I might be experiencing I would greatly appreciate it.

<3",4.580651223776222,6.034299573863637,5.5127272727272745,79.65255244755247,70.30681818181819,9.051748251748252,28.879370629370623,9.466822959209583,2.629198951048952,719,27,135,16,13,236,111,176,0.168,0.708,0.124,-0.8694,2,0,1,0,1,1,18.0,0,0,0,0,9,14,3,2,7,0,17,1,1,1,4,28,28,11,1,2,5,1,2,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,12,7,0,0,5,0,0,5,2,8,1,0,5,4,18,6,23,19,6,24,0,2,1,0,4,7,1,2,13,98,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972018362968425,0.0,0.1260110426160778,0.08884447996346741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195405175489492,0.0,0.0,0.4209889236413846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189047704975141,0.2664435049905509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943803753765448,0.0,0.0,0.132752410370282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002821201474005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284924048880234,0.1815457770683171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140085949152941,0.0,0.0,0.11236022270164378,0.13525951950375914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057492154608384,0.0,0.06982977557335525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415183599868525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481465707280543,0.0,0.12765053433965826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804828673843588,0.13479236153601248,0.2565921482165797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934049536279845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14108695727822976,0.0,0.12129474949110786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254580787190699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042698709169992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952338001284502,0.0,0.09781828780888463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29109744693250805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105750751054408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441413329411268,0.08141599308008085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096783835351438,0.0,0.0,0.10192121427918473,0.0,0.11424370849790234,0.11778744897924788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026097085423726,0.1389219990025264,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,m00nkiid,2020/01/13,"How to support a friend/girlfriend who's depressed and has bad insecurity/self image issues ? So I have been seeing someone for a few months who I really care about and love spending time with. As we have gotten know eachother more the more I worry about her mental health and I just don't know what I should do.

She definitely is depressed and self harms, I have of tried to speak to her about the self harming when I noticed cuts on her arms, I felt uncomfortable bringing it up and when I did she made it clear she did not want to speak about it. I had just asked what had happened to her arm and she said 
""it doesn't matter""
 I asked her if she wants to talk about it, said I am here for her but I didn't want to press her further when I could tell how uncomfortable I was making her. 

She also has bad insecurity issues, she thinks she looks disgusting all the time even though she is beautiful. She used to miss our plans purely cos she couldn't face going outside because of her face, she is a lot more comfortable around me now and will see me even not wearing makeup but I can tell it is a real struggle for her. She is obsessed with her appearance but never thinks she looks good and this really takes up a lot of her mental space at times, constantly thinking she is disgusting and missing important things such as college because she can't get out of bed. 

I honestly have no idea how to approach this, she isn't registered to a doctor's and won't get that sorted so she can't even go to get help yet. I just don't know how to speak to her about this or what I can do to help. I feel completely useless and would appreciate any advice what so ever on what things I could possibly do to try and help her",5.237553176890355,5.385781233429395,5.680798682585426,83.76477425552353,68.07780979827089,8.799725538630438,28.05118704542336,8.563005593585519,1.7566570330725957,1356,40,285,19,21,436,163,347,0.155,0.725,0.12,-0.7853,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,2,0,0,1,30,21,3,3,9,0,38,8,5,8,5,63,75,31,0,9,10,0,3,0,0,4,2,5,1,2,19,17,0,0,9,0,1,5,13,15,0,0,12,12,57,6,39,56,7,26,0,5,4,1,52,9,0,6,12,213,76,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559313123164563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823034989065185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652412728917495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708469258827094,0.18290571431234856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16335901959432395,0.11926601658196323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973876644698396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256730089058612,0.10571371087176508,0.0,0.15621007113855506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16851248260524035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012769062395636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19383680744733173,0.08848801077652572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049463090326680316,0.0,0.0939270201163342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557909412619587,0.0,0.15332805093614926,0.0,0.11119202387961488,0.08205068840635871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650602888879927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398304524911696,0.0,0.0,0.19670943427443566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104321404197366,0.0,0.20420707088119425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16128563394949555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16429616298698285,0.0,0.0,0.1663340652261287,0.08829058020708161,0.0925640640736997,0.06529872403702858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971685090224432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808271493329115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544841295801423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137403038152296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028261225416576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134588621598714,0.12533797169995514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18610731758218754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15590718646783233,0.0,0.30615738356323224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288652187238217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226758069771953,0.0,0.0,0.11101027146583638,0.0,0.0,0.07355197424558854,0.07862776083099589,0.17100613939749024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998072231938776,0.18804628755758207,0.09611223745752044,0.0,0.17112704792502614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283305338589158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448910238719792,0.0,0.0,0.17309856730115586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934569663388672,0.0,0.06949183585174122,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,redditor977,2020/01/13,"Watching TV shows reduce my anxiety & depression significantly? I can't quite put my finger on why or how this happens but basically the title. When I'm just doing nothing and watching a show or play a computer game I like, I just feel normal and OK again. Does anyone feel similar? Thanks!",3.1922424242424263,5.987586072727275,5.148636363636364,74.47628787878789,79.18181818181819,8.03030303030303,27.34848484848485,8.841846274778883,2.8080303030303027,234,10,39,6,6,80,45,55,0.061,0.695,0.244,0.9194,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,1,2,1,1,1,0,11,7,7,0,1,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,5,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,5,5,4,1,7,0,4,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,3,22,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197365900462363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22574777161445456,0.0,0.0,0.20633811187216566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541659092585174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582406575986397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984189926646046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609525792860345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416908870402093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891316036338097,0.2831527455402412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966531691514537,0.0,0.3138711138005953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716849170813905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662784050959303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lunxrbun,2020/01/13,"Depression/Anxiety Classes? Bay Area, California, USA

i recently had an appointment with my doctor who shortly rushed me to the crisis clinic to get my mental diagnosis checked and turns out my depression. anxiety. and panic disorder have not gotten better for the past few years. fun to hear. 

the crisis psychiatrists suggested for me to take a depression anxiety or panic class to help with my mental health. 

to all the people who have been through these classes / group therapies / programs: does it really work? 

i’m really doubting this would work or help. but i need some honest opinions and, only if you’re comfortable, experiences?",6.230458715596331,9.211770440366976,6.848155963302755,65.37883944954129,69.36697247706422,10.965504587155962,32.91834862385321,10.793553405168565,4.83867266055046,514,24,72,18,10,168,77,109,0.183,0.6990000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.4569,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,0,9,0,3,6,0,5,3,0,0,1,17,12,7,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,5,0,0,3,1,8,4,12,8,3,7,0,2,0,0,7,3,0,6,3,47,13,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3704900246320385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14277537760989928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780859756543828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18501750990167468,0.16523468236125324,0.14127210338996432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579135652450501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434267495710139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17159694132187273,0.1819480079285057,0.0,0.216411801685434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32537528586692965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970136893845933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277793761505527,0.0,0.3788163596247927,0.0,0.0,0.15410715283697876,0.11191810589772784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20683768708324485,0.0,0.15939673722819134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137838220154774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184614007679664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17559398683073818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23505195250130714,0.0,0.0,0.11467818095182895,0.0,0.0,0.10395829303246867
mentalhealth,All_Can_Smile,2020/01/13,"Guys guys trust me on this one Breath and tell yourself youre not all the bad things and believe it
Boom",7.553636363636365,5.304659818181818,5.862727272727272,92.21409090909091,64.45454545454545,8.8,31.09090909090909,3.1291,1.0097636363636369,84,2,20,0,1,24,20,22,0.0,0.755,0.245,0.7311,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038189777839453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4099605652030716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7205834820450897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24656994188826475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180412725024064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417412291330093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Worst_Superhero_Ever,2020/01/13,"On a scale of ""I actually feel pretty good"" - to - ""holy fu*king sh*t anxiety is kicking my ass"" -- How do you feel today? It's Monday - ugh. How is everybody?",1.625,3.779896833333332,4.830000000000002,78.245,80.66666666666666,8.0,26.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.495666666666668,115,5,22,3,3,42,27,30,0.217,0.624,0.159,-0.3094,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,2,0,4,5,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,3,5,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,2,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.42805752026174826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355647921705895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4435875780172832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3679174299911779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4462630755995566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4157873522568283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PhantomSquidz,2020/01/13,"Having some problems First ever reddit post sorry if it ain't any good.


So i haven't had what most would say is a hard life but when i was young there was too much for me to handle and i was always sad.

I was a kid and had no way to cope with it and felt like my parents and sister just didn't understand so i ended up playing games because why live a bad life if i could escape to a world where i was a hero or people couldn't let me down.

I was 7 i'm 19 now and still haven't ever actually dealt with my problems because i stopped careing or even noticing i was sad but now i'm starting to have problems escaping to games due to it not giving me the same solice anymore.

I'm honestly just lost because i stopped having hopes or dreams to make it less painful to fail and now i'm losing the only thing that got me through life.",2.6632187365706907,3.5332066927374304,4.019106145251398,90.77207993124195,74.2513966480447,6.4015470562956605,24.94241512677267,6.297961479604792,0.6233606360120332,654,20,147,4,13,216,104,179,0.247,0.629,0.125,-0.9715,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,5,15,17,0,0,7,0,21,4,0,1,2,35,34,16,0,9,10,2,2,1,0,1,4,1,0,1,7,8,0,2,2,4,0,0,7,10,0,1,13,3,17,7,14,17,5,20,0,5,0,0,7,4,0,8,15,102,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.13512420018846108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152159623290612,0.0,0.0,0.09416257464047798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373224453198001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561448832601898,0.2532253104122806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14117673425896368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055494511967907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264100979288535,0.0,0.0,0.09145640633505607,0.2505033664947568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13295041066853935,0.0,0.0,0.11778029268806615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283053945387102,0.0,0.11613987866058895,0.11074502242095934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240395852421948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752936329218338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415922895191334,0.29341084128491257,0.06764817335186056,0.0,0.1222692437571444,0.0,0.0,0.15490959278327374,0.15115351504229435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242805921131136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178946519993964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764604326523113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105310691006961,0.14733906750102832,0.0,0.15375165202946026,0.0,0.0,0.09599585477020356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261348537595147,0.0,0.0,0.39748378043052013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011482759526547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15500290857391785,0.0980079325697488,0.0,0.11058023791868887,0.2315298793279223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199158234740358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14414943812857667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990897044609232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494528383104116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836326227699667,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,v4nk4,2020/01/13,"I'm just not happy Recently I went through a break up. This isn't the problem actually. It was rough but I have gotten through it more or less.

But the problem is that it made me realize just how dissatisfied I am. I am just not happy. I am not sad either. Not angry, nothing. I am just drifting through each day. Get up, shower, travel, waste my time all day because school is not engaging me at all. I just go there, collect my As gotten purely from natural gifts and waste my day on Reddit. When I get home I have to wait for hours for anything to happen. My friends get back, it's time to go to training or it's FNM/ commander night at my local games store. I am always just waiting for short and transitory bursts of any emotion. 

I have nothing to strive for. My place in uni is basically ensured, my parents have enough money so I don't need to work until I move out. I do but just because I want some extra cash to waste on things to distract myself from reality. I don't really have anything to live for or look forward to either. My girlfriend made me happy but now that she's gone I realize that even before that I was running on memes and video games all day. Video games and magic the gathering are the only things that really bring any emotion to me at this point and my ability to play them is relegated to a fucking schedule until my friends get online or go to FNM. I live for human interaction and intimacy but I hardly really get it and I have no outlet for it. I just do the best I can to distract myself and have no idea what to do. 

I don't really lack motivation. When I want something I do it. Problem is I just don't fucking want anything. I don't care for fame, power, money, drugs, whatever. I just want to feel something. I wanna feel love, hate, happiness, sadness. I can settle for anything at this point. On one side the break up was a wake up call to show me just how miserable my life is. On the other side I miss her because U genuinely felt something consistently for once. Hell I even miss the first day of the break up a bit just because I felt something, even tho it was sadness.",2.318721560130008,4.319781995305167,4.098638497652583,85.13258396533045,77.63849765258216,6.81054532322138,25.477067533405556,7.793537801064563,1.4792023113037198,1654,62,331,26,39,557,183,426,0.16699999999999998,0.7170000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.9776,4,0,5,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,1,5,24,26,4,3,13,0,35,6,1,5,4,67,71,26,0,10,28,1,6,0,3,0,2,0,2,1,21,10,0,2,8,8,4,11,13,15,0,2,12,7,55,11,55,59,14,55,1,6,1,3,15,24,3,5,19,242,76,3,0.0,0.0,0.07913205144152323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747329823371227,0.0,0.0,0.11028783430242832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669203351595644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06235313276233246,0.0,0.19772661755523135,0.0,0.0690015379275207,0.0,0.08509885408356059,0.0,0.08852917586030107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280186099138151,0.0,0.0826765640954415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614814066484494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403854726648116,0.0,0.0,0.18243046095073104,0.0,0.08378755017338295,0.0,0.16067735551445336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820029864701833,0.0,0.1557180537834244,0.0,0.0,0.06897503309392843,0.0,0.0,0.12529972130989386,0.1499326238961183,0.21183064657194448,0.0,0.13825578784460946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717075365662215,0.3452868535691667,0.07264062859562262,0.08005949463138727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813397879451011,0.0,0.07985722364241579,0.0,0.0,0.0915406342072846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05727619911576488,0.0,0.0,0.14320774625436375,0.0,0.06809509849436858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731868066304447,0.15345846051528353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618573759447408,0.0,0.0601271382267104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760973841243062,0.0,0.15561590469965889,0.0,0.0,0.08635810399663135,0.054948619307369086,0.06167252798893408,0.0,0.0,0.09004074488985135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472169324689115,0.0,0.15331234454394632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23277626743640134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20779308226861126,0.0,0.08006649996737668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206731462077659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497078870527428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774506145233773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456835324412248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19131571142113135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517115578481139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05903441775077066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bitch-ass-ho,2020/01/13,"How do I help my friend? So my close friend struggles a lot with depression and even anxiety and lately she seems like she’s been going through a rough time with depression, so much so that she’s missing school. I personally have never gone through mental health issues so I don’t know how to help her. It seems like anything I try to do never ends up helping her and I always feel at a loss cos idk how best to help her. She also never tells me she feels depressed and seeks my help first unless I ask her how she’s been. Anyone who can help me out or is going through the same thing would be really helpful. Thank you❤️",3.110859375000004,4.534303367187501,3.8754375,90.07581250000004,73.921875,6.682500000000001,22.95625,7.1686216300943375,0.6558631249999998,493,13,105,5,10,157,80,128,0.153,0.614,0.233,0.9189,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,10,12,0,1,4,0,10,1,0,5,3,26,21,15,0,1,2,0,3,2,2,1,1,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,5,0,0,3,4,6,0,1,3,3,21,6,12,16,4,14,0,5,0,0,23,4,0,4,9,74,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096098453034183,0.10504897448822803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657985709226707,0.0,0.0,0.08827597816263888,0.0,0.10389186616253417,0.0,0.11802542759307524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249014922372435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262132824394441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181881441174013,0.0,0.0,0.08338603004015377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12767020227507925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738702096214577,0.0,0.0,0.1950787581433001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435000126996576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341963910104973,0.0,0.0,0.5923525726677394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177077025119052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06938294586394361,0.0,0.1424139546754046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335740800079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073320713101576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722892596741509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280727007616846,0.0,0.2921121814285718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11023543487826526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808781057450934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777035457869335,0.0,0.2298640240360667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319824805489172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034686805335743,0.11623277730802205,0.0,0.0,0.08387398058217363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361659195112527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571453321349401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968340515182936,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blah83162,2020/01/13,"Should I commit myself? I have been pretty depressed for months. For years off and on. 

I'm currently being evicted from where I live and have no money or job to move. 

I was treated for depression 25+ years ago but haven't been to a doctor for that since then. 

I have thoughts of killing myself but I know I'll never go through with it. 

I also think if I get a diagnosis I may be able to collect disability. 

Has anyone committed themselves? Did it help?",1.5976923076923093,4.014954318681319,3.260098901098903,87.8974010989011,82.73626373626374,5.837802197802197,23.385714285714286,7.1686216300943375,1.0112452747252745,357,13,71,5,10,118,66,91,0.141,0.75,0.109,-0.5913,3,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,2,0,13,1,0,0,3,15,19,8,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,1,2,3,3,0,0,5,0,11,1,13,10,0,12,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,3,7,53,14,2,0.2354054325791837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20867271243040908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882536393839329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16460095190829946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40550870827498303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24094743522706266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298962252169908,0.0,0.13378633225507272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15778729932427465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336035681807092,0.0,0.2604412329323613,0.0,0.12937266936160255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20786730979487314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18789837038587406,0.25019872018137124,0.0,0.0,0.1815591818896531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394919547136957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19472980644211899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083829594198025,0.0,0.1868856184258876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031867610214318
mentalhealth,Novacula0ccami,2020/01/13,"From hero to zero in 30 seconds flat Does anyone else that struggles with depression find that you can be ticking along well and stable and then within the space of 5 minutes fall into a pit of depression?

I was having a a lovely weekend with my wonderful wife, as our son and dil had come to visit and then like a wave crashing over me on Sunday evening, I fell into a pit of depression.
Now I'm familiar with the feelings of depression and know that given time I'll naturally climb out of it, but this one took me by suprise by how quickly it came on.",15.697837837837836,6.654085630630632,14.254414414414413,58.76648648648649,57.55855855855856,17.322522522522522,52.31531531531533,11.855464076750405,6.014012612612612,439,17,85,7,3,145,80,111,0.099,0.7959999999999999,0.106,-0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,1,0,2,5,9,0,1,7,0,5,1,0,1,0,20,14,10,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,14,0,0,4,1,0,7,0,5,1,3,5,1,7,4,23,8,0,23,0,4,0,1,6,9,0,1,8,64,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400817305329069,0.20527104438571764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291345164301408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17257436300943954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6902069634806184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17531806355185114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167357579673393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232206126079948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129744945578263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18310627356927195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010110936619127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787554636306482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18081382555922515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575493348591994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094378862758712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681931835917052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22258406973679545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18012887683583378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172591672613406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pixieIndarkness,2020/01/13,"The MH Saga Continues - TW - CW self harm, emergency rooms, mania It's been a while since I've posted and I feel as if I have lived several lifetimes in that space. I ended up having to put my care on hold for a while because of some physical health things that I needed to take care of. I needed a two day procedure (out patient surgery) but the months leading up to the date were hell, and I've been recovering for almost a month now. 

**TLDR: I'm still batshit, cutting to get by, I now have RAGE burning due to new trauma, and I can't seem to get help and I just need to get by, one day at a time**

I feel like that kind of ""sick"" gave my mind  something else to focus on, but only for a little while. It was something very emotional as well, which hasn't helped. I've gotten through it, but I am definitely no where near over it. I was doing ""okay"" until a week ago, when I couldn't sleep for over four days, I had had maybe 5 hours total via short naps but every time I fell asleep it would be less than three hours before I bolted upright in bed, or a night terror would wake me. 

The procedure was definitely triggering. I dream of the gas stuff they give you, breathe in four seconds, out six seconds, in four seconds, out six seconds. I was crying so much the nurse had to keep the count the entire 30 minutes and it's seared into my mind. I often have nightmares of this. 

After days and day of little to no sleep I got extra loopy. The WWIII speculation started and I dove into head first. I was making non-stop commentary, grew more social media followers than I'd ever had - I thought the the world needed me. My grandiosity and mania skyrocketed. I live in Canada, and kept saying and thinking that Russia and China want this war. They want the USA to send their armies out in masses to leave North America unattended, or not well guarded so they could invade. No one could prove me wrong. I made so many speculative commentaries and when one thing after another kept coming true I got worse and worse. 

It took DAYS and a trip to the emergency room to get me a little straighter. I began (and still do) to obsessed over killing one of our neighbours. She's a horrible person, and I know I've never spoken to her, but I'm SURE of this fact. She has a dog that she walks off-leash and it gets into physical fights with other dogs, and hers isn't usually the stronger one. The poor thing. She leaves it's poop everywhere. I'm also pretty sure she's not human. Wether she's an alien or a demon I'm not quite sure yet. 

I collect knives and things, but anyone with a good kitchen knife could get the job done. The urges were so bad I cracked open a razor and went to town on my arms and legs instead. It helped. I tried to keep it low, only every 30-45 mins to keep that rush of the feel good chemicals steady and to get myself to morning. I had told myself that I would tell my mother and husband that I NEED emergency. We go, my mother drops us off because she doesn't want to pay for parking. I know...but at least these days she's somewhat trying. 

For anyone who hasn't read my past posts, we're living with my mother currently because I lost my really high paying job ($80k/year - yeah talk about going from everything to nothing) due to my current mental state. They've been letting me float by, and with the physical medical stuff that took precedent my MH stuff was on hold.

Back to it - we went in, did the typical stuff, got triaged etc, got in almost right away because saying you want to kill a neighbour, and having a plan, a very specific and concrete plan you get seen right away. The head nurse was amazing, I brought all my past medications, papers, etc along with the pages I have of my delusions, hallucinations, urges, and thoughts & feelings. At this point in life I've gotten tired of this dance every time with new doctors. I'm tired, I am sick and tired of having to prove I'm crazy. It's what I feel like happens every time. I'm just so tired of it and most of the time, I don't want to get better, I'm fine. Everyone just needs to leave me to be who I'm going to be. 

I finally saw the psychiatrist, and he was TERRIBLE. And arrogant piece of shit, and after giving me some drop in therapy places to go to let me go. My husband was in pieces. He has fuelled a new rage and desire in me. I want to go down and bring him with me. I want him to be known as the own who had a killer in his hospital and he let her go. Immediately I'm thinking I need to find ways to commit mass murder. How do I poison water supplies, what can i spay onto vegetables at grocery stores, or inject into fruits/veg. I even wondered...how does one get things like anthrax? and I mean the real deal, not a bag of ""white powder"" I got scammed for on the dark web. 

I want to hire a PI to get me everything that they can on him. I want to know when his children are born so I can send them things on their birthdays. I'm obsessive and when it comes to my MH when people don't take me seriously I feel the URGE to PROVE. THEM. WRONG. He is my number one target now. I have been holding myself back for over a decade now, and now I don't want to. He even tried to toy around with me, and the minute I sensed that the mask went on, and I began my plans. 

I had brought my bowie knife to the hospital. Not even my husband knew, no one checked my little backpack. It contained three stuffed animals, and my knife. It's a Hibben, it's VERY NICE. I could have jabbed it so far into his arrogant cocky body over and over, but then it would be over. There is no way I'm going down with a body count of 1. I know I sound like the worst edge lord right now, but they're just trying to be like us. They wish they could stab into flesh, feel it tear open then the relief with the warm blood spraying up, and pooling up around your hands. Warmth, a warm that the demons never let me have anymore. Funny because you would think the army of the damned would bring warmth with them, you know hell supposing to be on fire and all. But they're cold, so cold. 

My family is super disappointed, and they don't know how to manage me. They're stopped sleeping in shifts. I've held myself together long enough to get myself to the point where I can now no longer sleep and be awake unsupervised and I'm ready to start making the world hurt the way I hurt. To start correcting some of the injustices in this world. I want to bring chaos. I want governments to burn. I want to set the world on fire, eat the rich then walk away to leave the common people to RISE UP and finally take back what is ours. I don't want the world, I don't want to take it over. I have no idea how to run a better functioning society, but I do want to help open the playing field for people to do better, because I know they exist.

They say they'll get me new help, try a new hospital, but it's been a week and I'm still home and I'm tired of fighting for myself. I'm just tired. I'm scared to sleep but managed 7 hours since Jan 10th. I'm keeping track in a digital note because I feel like it'll be important. 

I seem to always write novels here, but it helps. What brought me here tonight was trying to google how to stab myself. I don't want to die tonight, but I want to leave a series of escalating incidents to really nail this psychiatrist to the post when he is eventually sued by the families of the people I've killed. There aren't any good answers, everyone just telling the OP's to get help, to call 9-1-1, saying it's that serious. In reality aren't I fine? I sat down and wrote ALL THIS. Does that seem like something someone who isn't fine would do? I am speaking rationally, I have my thoughts together. People who are in a crisis can't make plans. I am okay. Am I sick? Yes, I know that, but I can't seem to get help for the life of me. So I need to do this my way. 

​

Thanks to anyone who manages to read through this.",3.0046630291401826,4.305207135687732,4.005992924811128,89.52474427389376,73.98760842627014,7.114753967302235,23.42505096534357,7.630830124396978,0.8616313466842547,6143,168,1339,77,124,1986,586,1614,0.16,0.713,0.127,-0.9982,5,0,3,0,3,1,216.0,6,6,15,12,57,69,15,4,84,4,108,39,19,10,17,238,257,101,6,42,31,6,13,7,2,9,16,6,5,4,74,82,4,13,34,9,6,35,32,33,2,21,58,24,178,36,204,171,22,228,5,5,3,0,97,97,4,17,92,833,252,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0274006563718587,0.0,0.061905621941454735,0.0,0.0,0.024719443301582617,0.025720353073327543,0.06698391544304486,0.037560138626268634,0.02102047856120516,0.032412783969103326,0.0,0.0,0.030655316391234907,0.06484088028362978,0.0,0.0,0.05503452621343194,0.0,0.0,0.08712545150182822,0.07130574457707324,0.025809318431455428,0.13190102544453933,0.0,0.026302907439786357,0.0,0.0,0.08201456298491629,0.0,0.0686701045726693,0.0,0.0,0.03156349482798578,0.0,0.06303146504143718,0.0,0.0,0.053254023296969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339923067080392,0.0,0.033954182816634024,0.13954485682526574,0.03186779058438708,0.0,0.0,0.03208064404236147,0.0,0.0,0.03163862586268527,0.05410069072808391,0.031632592639066426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0316295775175143,0.02582209863455709,0.03477061289289622,0.02737789113051393,0.031939232704231615,0.06894767044155041,0.06124909294348777,0.02796068748660346,0.10417509832080714,0.05907339771026085,0.055561464943001786,0.0,0.05828010928755443,0.0,0.12503587761634602,0.06624828015047042,0.0,0.06772278127753996,0.0282520114472212,0.026292803981144364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422451175890255,0.05930512239122944,0.14053905849697884,0.07777981343884435,0.12361139117362516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02733441534328697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634470222542899,0.03285685152826598,0.0,0.0,0.16575144946447798,0.032659073201368426,0.03100616272841845,0.0,0.0913230585123099,0.0,0.06618153624958438,0.0348946545374494,0.0,0.0,0.06134861644734053,0.10990014716877038,0.1025950251788106,0.03218895573055649,0.13590262055062186,0.0,0.0,0.1636509508291973,0.0,0.1264339976952775,0.04366657929935412,0.10571056368772416,0.12392340833825133,0.08188469867901144,0.02735518235530737,0.0,0.0,0.03374290937273825,0.0,0.0,0.029248650131722106,0.06189981671136183,0.031338810754234635,0.031054163480059467,0.033671042482880366,0.0,0.06227897901562977,0.031150926631738563,0.0,0.06242241412961912,0.0,0.0493455863951792,0.0,0.02272307526808093,0.18336038284336592,0.04768079828140683,0.1492697459247482,0.0,0.029007794770226112,0.0,0.029659851507753295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16756825902679914,0.04701827941790202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05901592185970957,0.10714866362066287,0.02699021404134237,0.0322953215616106,0.0,0.05844160186910415,0.0,0.08881232072026098,0.031447507815010475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03107400187679296,0.0,0.03287755734148713,0.06183854921803151,0.03518338247275899,0.03960464051743475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791932439116607,0.0,0.09832638419561934,0.030947213039332983,0.0,0.0,0.1125605249525975,0.03224682021291648,0.03492052949535117,0.03172960458261799,0.05113964782010957,0.0,0.15466616583577658,0.03150977971393523,0.02619071346035963,0.0713901853212895,0.0,0.0,0.06563670290271031,0.0,0.07405647719397254,0.051685809179211534,0.0,0.0,0.14154238484322387,0.0,0.0,0.08739949966738703,0.0,0.0929646286703137,0.024845018314617773,0.05403499502389316,0.028458612619686213,0.03534931912912651,0.0,0.12321500927059527,0.059419388381237614,0.0,0.07361942850631895,0.0901220000605626,0.2131652609771746,0.0,0.029536698855130425,0.06868631602394562,0.12591887175520666,0.0,0.030195467224426186,0.0,0.07436403676508868,0.0,0.03404399994974013,0.07651421320974466,0.32817699723703364,0.09814256527149212,0.049589734452504385,0.0,0.055585240102828316,0.08596416886359237,0.0,0.0,0.03554602062963223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300171550927085,0.15370756350479914,0.06759245451369511,0.037560138626268634,0.019905612378560512
mentalhealth,Northrnmusic,2020/01/13,"(random rant) Ok so anyways I like to think of myself as rational, but with emotional baggage and quite extreme sexual abuse from early childhood. So has anyone got this really weird tick that just triggers the absolute fuck out of them? To me it’s people, things or whatever that is close to me. Strange I know but I think it has to deal with the perversion of innocence and the feeling of love almost. Things I love I strike out at the most subconsciously. 

I use to have suicidal depression for about 4-5 years of my life and worked my way through that, found confidence all that. Through the sadness now I just find rage like little things can just set me off and I am a whole different person. It’s like I’m not even there. 

I have a real problem with letting myself be vulnerable to other people. With feeling cared for and loved, I subconsciously stuff all my emotions down because that’s how I coped as a child. Anyone of authority use to scare me damn near to tears when they talked to me. 

I’m not perfect and it’s completely ok life is a journey and without the highs and the lows it’s just be boring.",2.6456891495601202,5.0983131520737315,3.700136154168412,86.10267176372018,78.7695852534562,7.079095098449937,25.071009635525762,8.150884317080207,1.6856746543778798,882,33,171,17,22,284,125,217,0.237,0.584,0.179,-0.9573,1,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,0,0,2,3,13,20,3,1,11,2,11,6,0,4,3,44,27,17,1,1,10,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,16,15,0,0,7,0,0,1,3,10,0,0,2,2,23,10,34,22,4,18,0,3,0,4,9,10,2,4,8,124,39,1,0.0,0.15597197028125873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181852595538449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18409161112423467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024657166284525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13421583613889382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13802212058494742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571514342466426,0.11338140904682835,0.0,0.0,0.13753586669503756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961547461677378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694703210800904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312236079714984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031664935922405,0.0,0.0,0.14433655439869505,0.0,0.12169913385300772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528459848904502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390849733339169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234594594412994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346109019193735,0.18596256482806614,0.1929380828366694,0.13193794445651622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35643093857533464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18252531454959106,0.11494304131262124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259617793308449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400154302582432,0.0,0.14983523209151095,0.0843320068561525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13179468608295725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069639836498736,0.14399288278732306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580731083405333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623674617628312,0.16869929728391286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22738952817408314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448976911824716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697144952584487,0.0,0.1268963406933181,0.0,0.09583554694224776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477189630572157
mentalhealth,OnePirateYay,2020/01/13,"I feel like there's two people living inside my mind I'm not sure if this is normal but I feel like I have two people inside my mind, and sometimes, there's me.
For example, when there's need to concentrate on where I'm going, it's me, I think ""Gotta go this way or I may get lost"". 

But many times a day, I feel like I have this sort of ""devil/angel"" in my head. When I think about something bad that happened, the bad part thinks ""this was YOUR fault"", and then there's the good part thinking ""it's okay, everyone makes mistakes"". I don't remember if it has always been this way or it's something new. Only noticed when I was thinking about suicide last year and it was like a war saying ""you shouldn't be here"" and the other part saying otherwise.

I have depression, and I never ever heard anyone saying this was a part of it. I recently told my friend about this and realized having these two people may not be normal.

I know that the right thing to do would be to go back to my psychiatrist, but I really don't have the money and there's a really small change I can get treatment for free.
I just want to know what this could possibly be, so I can understand it better. Thanks for reading.",3.7178230472516884,4.572792397540984,4.7576470588235305,86.51676470588238,71.74590163934427,7.872324011571842,23.369334619093536,8.124751697461798,1.0850576663452265,931,22,197,13,17,305,124,244,0.109,0.75,0.141,0.6084,0,0,2,0,0,1,34.0,0,2,0,2,17,18,1,0,9,1,26,1,1,1,3,47,53,19,2,10,10,0,3,4,1,5,0,4,0,0,21,7,0,0,13,1,2,3,6,7,0,3,8,7,27,12,15,35,4,23,0,2,0,0,8,5,0,7,17,137,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848274163691812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595153185108908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252713202025655,0.1575084186835237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341938047868314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977925608430184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07530775266825074,0.0,0.0,0.060829330173738864,0.0,0.08123865682317191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531886812539026,0.0,0.090127888153238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307480223442307,0.2021491166982212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287227623496298,0.0,0.09855780192100178,0.0,0.16081462684146094,0.07911209442168526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340786967687837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680069789514384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036728600307922,0.07688431527883957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843221721733384,0.0,0.08328729174284645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296266271417658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629600911579022,0.09562682831844446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190474920251699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993792771873733,0.07274627533092276,0.09109594156986273,0.0,0.0,0.18482937537031868,0.0,0.1073852392807451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173547472787907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4085623980414109,0.0,0.19617120013182432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633290960963496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434666133167367,0.0,0.12084907079196328,0.0,0.0931307434971704,0.0,0.10684746106592674,0.08054973537349666,0.0,0.22502386101339314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14522603827946076,0.09328601597414543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317201460168113,0.0,0.08889655508792005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868382302221255,0.0,0.0,0.06266277210377036,0.3021858793600304,0.0,0.0,0.05499941331591051,0.0,0.0,0.090127888153238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764141354542544,0.09819162971048176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05563305019764757,0.1497354560380144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700302930076517,0.0,0.0,0.06073971959005809
mentalhealth,CuteMauKitty,2020/01/13,"Questioning mental health I've been ... weird lately. Especially when I find time to think.

I can't really sort my thoughts, they are all over the place, almost feeling like different from my own thoughts. I often keep wondering what exactly I am thinking about.

On a side note: I am transgender, and trying to find a therapist so I can move on, get hormones, the name change, etc. And I am 100% certain I want that - in fact that is the only thing I am 100% of in my life.

So, a few weeks ago I had a breakdown after school, int he shower. I just kinda collapsed, turned the water off and just cried. Thoughts all over the place, but even more than usual Depressive, suicidal thoughts. Crying. After half an hour or so I was okay enough to finish my shower. Or I thought I was. When I Was back in my room I started trying to hurt myself, as I knew I am too weak for suicide, too scared. So I ran against the wall, cut myself and banged my hand against the wall. Screaming in my head to finally end it. But as always I couldn't do anything serious.

I can focus at work or at school pretty okay, but when I have time for myself things go weird.

​

Anyone got any ideas wtf is wrong with me?",2.121324613117171,4.3118868177966085,3.161739130434782,90.67021739130436,79.12711864406779,6.138246131171703,22.54900515843773,7.255503002510835,0.7856597641857035,923,29,190,12,23,295,145,236,0.215,0.7040000000000001,0.08,-0.9906,3,0,0,0,0,4,44.0,0,0,1,1,15,14,1,1,12,2,19,6,2,0,5,40,37,19,2,2,8,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,3,0,6,5,1,1,14,0,0,3,2,10,0,1,13,3,34,4,29,23,7,37,0,2,0,0,4,17,0,9,18,132,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960141696090146,0.0,0.10846121355951986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901262476661866,0.11735859409976852,0.13161383697014073,0.0736574980704121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757359384955484,0.0,0.08913351230588301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328707849192989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458226048478767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23795653824117816,0.0,0.0,0.09329102363403424,0.0,0.0,0.11316548187432365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593439831762644,0.11191771702211448,0.12079917418913284,0.07154063170927144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05476700903503518,0.0773798203997951,0.0,0.11865311764308732,0.1979947766269741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056589797196819565,0.0,0.06155756278286927,0.0,0.08662891075806453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116181074711023,0.1151331293907666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066678538671821,0.0,0.11595279252103732,0.12227375993253872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962748047630273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221833474598548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650565545210095,0.05291693878546097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091554272462426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512105284711792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082377972875696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263309637486473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019467227917393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133690342572738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06938897047463477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084415979442198,0.2192398864863976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666548128812621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369567205801213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576135275054862,0.14391853292285128,0.13880697252102744,0.0,0.4299476260225651,0.12631798131967908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707671896133795,0.11781495083937728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192929957948268,0.0,0.06388663234695156,0.0,0.08688326859714879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174623333585505,0.07885416445192722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184247797551445,0.13161383697014073,0.0
mentalhealth,XenonCarrion,2020/01/13,"I'm a quarter of a century old and I'm crying because I can't find my headphones. I just moved and started a new job. 

I thought I was starting Wednesday. 

I'm starting tomorrow. 

I thought I had 2 days to prepare myself. 

I have 8 hours. (Not even that if I ever manage to get any sleep tonight. Which I really should. Because I'm exhausted and can barely put a coherent thought together.)

Yet here I am... wasting precious time... crying... because I can't find my headphones... (:

EDIT: I know it's never just about the headphones but rather the headphones are the straw that broke the anxiety-ridden proverbial camel's back... yet, that fact never seems to be able to make me feel less stupid or pathetic in situations like this.",2.747019527235356,5.2038981366906505,3.9022867420349456,84.76901079136692,78.42446043165471,6.561356628982527,30.072456320657764,7.7094869923839395,2.2039780061664955,567,28,104,9,14,184,91,139,0.14,0.8009999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.8876,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,0,10,5,1,0,8,0,10,2,1,1,4,24,25,6,0,3,7,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,8,0,0,2,5,3,0,1,5,1,16,2,7,18,1,20,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,18,67,22,3,0.15954702623704795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084974489418459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268181492609742,0.0,0.29177515899643874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505098331404156,0.10289463292673444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537930610572874,0.14431941947104468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806717703172062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916461830851475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335673614819257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571216825424562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583258050302591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876828731046786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794661798783814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064988789161921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957323939338415,0.0,0.0,0.2461050047923741,0.15409151214018946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16741776533717467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038882855257292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220991044254753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14524562051897028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17933754224879467,0.15966224919130625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33878461906385976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3799875517693385,0.09303315404202032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,swaggod43,2020/01/13,"name of this feeling? Its odd I enjoy my life no complaint, but it seems like nothing is ever enough and Im constantly thinking about how I may feel when I get to where I wanna be and where I envision myself. Im 20 on salary so my living is no complaints, live alone. Im not happy or sad, I just want more. 

Also have a following for something I do, I thought when I hit certain following milestones I would feel different, but it’s like I disregard where I was, where I started, how I have changed my life for the better, and I just want everything. I get fan messages travel across state whatever cool shit right, but I want it all. I want the most everything because I know I can.

I got my first apartment, nice place. Now I just think about how great it’s gonna feel when i’m living in a fuckin penthouse, mansion whatever. Almost like my emotions are based on what I can do for myself. And I just fucking want everything the 9 yards. 

Not sad, not happy, but Im never ever satisfied and my personal goals I reach feel like nothing because I was supposed to do that. I had to do that to get there, to get where I see myself.",2.373995633187775,4.184538484716157,3.818731441048033,88.0778788209607,76.81659388646288,6.850742358078603,26.297161572052413,7.734863291789972,1.4790033187772922,879,34,181,13,20,290,119,229,0.132,0.65,0.218,0.9515,2,1,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,3,23,17,3,0,5,1,17,5,1,3,5,47,45,18,0,7,12,0,5,4,0,3,2,0,1,1,9,5,0,1,10,2,0,3,6,5,0,1,5,7,37,12,16,35,4,26,0,2,1,2,3,12,3,5,14,126,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316034000966716,0.10669836571770423,0.0,0.08238560879826379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560091318501185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111342866694312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108982230262437,0.0,0.0,0.11132876742424902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763469450861944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115884410361564,0.0,0.106447912227824,0.0,0.0,0.186376224812016,0.0,0.0,0.2777650608393472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604517821601881,0.07359800172205612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762934652583007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524096811253598,0.2152962346008941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239505713777494,0.11358067473102687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21933488093454406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4451200957756143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056617477155247974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553312046006425,0.20132282198311272,0.0,0.27290747083696804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945590736967395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19770226161815815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995369306108426,0.10763469450861944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08797910660544489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209415202111768,0.0937861672463129,0.0,0.0,0.10574925812750008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931036051472293,0.0,0.0,0.07291857482626977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202299707926213,0.0,0.08178692056123325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038213615122166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318294256841668,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Grimwell06,2020/01/13,"Question... focusing I'm not sure if I have anything wrong with me or what, but whenever I need to do anything exam related, I'm too lazy to do it and when I start studying I can't focus, everything else is more interesting, I start getting sleepy or I start doing other stuff like staring at the wall or singing. The problem is, I'm 25 and I need my driver's license. So I guess what I'm asking for are recommendations as to how to study when you're my personality type. Thanks.",1.7744329896907232,4.062194742268041,4.007432989690724,83.60805670103095,80.95876288659794,6.766597938144328,26.194845360824733,7.908726449838941,1.7205513402061858,378,16,76,7,10,130,67,97,0.107,0.778,0.115,0.4134,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,1,1,16,21,12,0,4,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,11,4,8,21,1,7,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,6,6,48,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3617749673880649,0.0,0.20549561190693744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18362567141265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19755387525271365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484329241463848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421489540124452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738959628163794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3259773139143143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19193235395205255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103314871337359,0.0,0.0,0.2462410217223877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4667546124114456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25163345375230073,0.0,0.0,0.20717128165660798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20237440510621105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24033116010748976,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cacacam,2020/01/13,"how do i keep a job with depression? in the beginning of november, i had a really bad depressive episode. at the time, i was working as a cashier for about 10-15 hours a week. it was at the point where i couldn't even call my workplace to tell them what was happening. i ended up missing three shifts in a row. when i finally got the motivation to tell my boss what was up, they told me that they were letting me go. i said i understood, because i dont want to be a liability to the store. i just want to know what i can do so that when my next episode starts up, i don't end up getting fired. any and all advice is appreciated.",3.2446969696969674,3.830423772727272,5.058787878787879,84.91651515151518,72.63636363636363,9.2,29.060606060606066,9.444778638647367,2.2573424242424247,486,19,113,11,9,167,85,132,0.162,0.7929999999999999,0.045,-0.9138,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,3,2,8,4,0,0,11,0,15,0,0,3,1,13,29,6,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,1,3,0,1,1,3,4,0,1,10,2,20,0,18,16,1,22,0,3,0,0,8,10,0,0,11,80,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800109958599131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527128516187486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15381031785962915,0.11229464994267724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18810226179147824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3173250987572384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158964850469662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32631641539037765,0.0,0.0,0.12167107368954745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20179654380065631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624378790491528,0.0,0.10469260025464354,0.0,0.14733211508843466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289911427238746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814128838129596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18280316508694816,0.16373714607905826,0.0,0.0,0.10123875084285278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883704661304922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19591281588923812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17414100615608366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801168564139168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17522892671861884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303870430045888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220208926570948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741619165399224,0.0,0.0,0.17602359595419834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21730742282656115,0.0,0.1477647082965643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410939524195928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnonymousAB1,2020/01/13,"My Truth My depression and anxiety is my identity. Despite how desperately I want to be rid of them, there is a big part of me that is afraid to be without them. Who am I if not A, girl with severe depression, anxiety, and social ineptness? Who is just A? I don't know her on her own because when she was on her own, she hadn't come into herself yet. And the formative years one has of getting to know themselves as a person and what they want, well they were spent first not acknowledging and then hiding depression and self harm. Now I feel like time is too far gone to figure myself out because I only know the worse of myself. The scared version who only wants to please others, even if that means by just existing as empty space to stay out of the way. I'm afraid that despite my self awareness of all of my issues and flaws, that I am going to stay going nowhere fast. I want more for myself but I don't know how to stay in momentum without giving in to my mental demons. I just want to be okay with not being everyone's cup of tea and still be able to live a life. And I mean actually live one. Not just exist unhappily.",4.909837804117282,5.062455882096074,5.938630692451657,81.61939956331882,68.78165938864629,9.162944479101686,28.147535870243296,9.04235418022936,2.0434514036182163,883,27,183,15,14,294,125,229,0.12300000000000001,0.8170000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.8285,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,4,1,14,11,0,3,9,1,18,2,0,2,2,46,38,18,0,7,13,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,9,15,1,0,9,0,1,4,9,7,1,3,5,1,30,4,34,28,6,27,1,3,0,0,19,10,0,2,10,139,39,0,0.1150625779751139,0.0,0.1122844781272944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17604511442167348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14028215912278466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911622258862844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29730968942135544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599774757154483,0.0,0.0,0.10994722415367322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817909666785503,0.08220072869601154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787217004588668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060115447959225264,0.11037850940943847,0.13078542936281445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200954372097547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529415348349841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127210162851889,0.056213763563331375,0.0,0.20320472879235274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506737583309904,0.0,0.0,0.11595601559175205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559387613577214,0.17502055093682836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12460155918067915,0.0,0.0,0.1004682049173428,0.0,0.12630415797299865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151977133821104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24007072608771896,0.1299879618511748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117291808073506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3679241956749742,0.09188912340331716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709391452602989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33933444829160564,0.09133131867448838,0.0,0.0,0.10345507605972486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22183243830067906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172585970276868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409652774116897
mentalhealth,suiitelife,2020/01/13,"my brain just forgets and i dont care about anything i am the most careless person on the face of the earth. i have no hobbies, no interests, i dont care about anything, i have no drive or ambition, i just genuinely cant find a good reason or have a good reason to care. my boyfriend has all kinds of hobbies and interests, but my brain shuts down on me and physically stops me from wanting to do anything out of fear, and when i do push past the anxiety i end up having a breakdown where i cry and humiliate myself in public or ANYWHERE. my lack of interest leaves me to sit around and do little to nothing all day, i cant even look at a book without losing interest in 20 seconds. i cant find the will in me to get active. my day consists of going to college and xoming home and laying in bed to exist.  please help. this leads me to feel like i have to process of thought, and i honestly feel incapble to even learn or want to try things. what are some goals i can do for myself everyday to start to find my purpose. i feel so helpless. its ruining everything around me.",5.124844742413551,5.11809531651376,6.051834862385324,81.54175370501062,68.31192660550458,9.27649964714185,32.36556104446013,9.057496981413335,2.599319971771348,841,34,173,14,13,279,118,218,0.18100000000000002,0.685,0.134,-0.8081,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,3,12,17,0,1,9,0,19,3,3,3,2,40,32,16,0,3,8,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,4,12,0,1,10,1,0,4,9,5,0,1,1,4,29,12,36,30,5,28,0,3,1,0,3,15,0,6,9,127,33,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089095648353412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933167858392319,0.2115359758741384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652672677487686,0.0,0.0,0.36341066378789455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305095490287438,0.1532479933065574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27849386984000385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052322844610173,0.0,0.0,0.15694858650440308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10678068402127963,0.0,0.0,0.13369668127835013,0.18022495293416624,0.08487941150048936,0.0,0.0,0.32577641108700944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207443566269645,0.0,0.06752367316722546,0.19930796018589425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963726824649175,0.0,0.11917825667167348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372455313644268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258048936485107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058045606713882224,0.11908097025682846,0.0,0.0,0.0997722680556056,0.13292038577503212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400344592125047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341962474875154,0.0,0.10374217167138566,0.0,0.13042004333634502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24431732155675034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409583920609827,0.0,0.0,0.09933226317936904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789335017540165,0.0,0.0,0.0943235620973978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066563922196883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015694862925102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453065631761156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shane_v04,2020/01/13,Anyone else get this? Does anyone else notice a heavy like feeling on their head all the time? I've had this issue since middle school and now I'm in high school and it never goes away! It feels like balancing a brick on top of my head kinda. I notice it when I get up in the morning its not there and when I think about it it hits me like that! Does anyone else get something similar?,0.7946944444444455,3.067064525,2.036666666666669,96.2927777777778,85.0,4.555555555555556,15.138888888888893,5.82211442006289,-0.7921527777777779,302,5,66,2,9,96,52,80,0.0,0.851,0.149,0.8727,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,5,3,0,0,4,0,1,2,2,0,2,10,9,5,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,6,3,8,7,1,14,0,0,0,0,1,9,0,1,8,38,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010956667839956,0.4412154371996837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13485883082323832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25122243061773664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3597231548426549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451544179310001,0.10254369361810786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.224978300376498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946231357062169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15165595191026407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149816551672094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103764907952221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070548154601416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3268383039937021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29053657184230725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187362532104771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050269190836147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197346019099216,0.0,0.0,0.08369825820206571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ash_xx_1805,2020/01/13,"my mental state is rapidly decreasing. i’ve dealt with mental illness now for about 5 years and it only seems to be going downhill at this point. i’ve been on medication for almost 6 months and it worked in the beginning for about 2 weeks and then everything just crashed. my anxiety and depression symptoms are worse and for the past week now all i’ve thought about it killing myself. 
i have been close a few times with going through with it but i held on a bit longer. i don’t know what to do anymore. i’m just holding in all my emotions and keeping them buried inside of my brain.",3.9356513409961735,5.524411913793106,4.1866666666666665,88.00277777777781,72.10344827586206,7.224521072796936,28.406130268199234,7.793537801064563,1.6436429118773948,466,18,94,6,9,145,78,116,0.095,0.905,0.0,-0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,1,1,7,2,1,0,4,0,8,4,1,0,2,22,17,8,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,10,0,3,3,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,4,0,9,0,19,12,4,20,0,1,0,0,1,7,0,2,10,61,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19283079664013145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731533827770946,0.0,0.1909774555392568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21023630131139692,0.0,0.0,0.21497153729201296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586005094671175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21661505929602634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306928210145692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188836632208919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116484953065705,0.2130499063585748,0.0,0.10583130321766897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939937724698952,0.3881300476494512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15370734412870732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14645797897607368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18382962435014225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18204066596733925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17530827585714032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20015371287705105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287887811428166,0.11228897487155677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30893568951435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401930777891655,0.0,0.19624503575518296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400861092058955
mentalhealth,CustomAlpha,2020/01/13,"Some of my own inner conversations tell me that people simply don’t want to be around me, for several reasons. Unemployed but have money, single, not super stable emotionally or mentally but not bad enough to have a diagnosable problem. They’re too busy or do things we don’t share interest in...   So many reasons I talk myself away from others.",7.079285714285714,8.079985777777777,7.784246031746032,67.30589285714285,64.23809523809524,10.744444444444444,31.62301587301588,10.686352973137794,3.6833206349206353,276,10,44,7,4,92,53,63,0.139,0.7,0.161,0.1591,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,2,0,13,7,5,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,6,3,8,6,4,4,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,3,0,36,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21667934962759705,0.0,0.0,0.2286841547942,0.0,0.20323047064569533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470478669866818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27379444527486085,0.0,0.2514992913037315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467713851481326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24529192807749586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16874427268985914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23290280465868216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5005155091838468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27497493447512544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19563727646239729,0.21274404241259826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617054475316798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14356478300808714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1_67985,2020/01/13,"why does shaking my head left and right feel good? i feel like i can’t stop i can’t stop thinking of killing myself, it’s been 3 years 

reality is not a fact

we are perception ; a tool",-0.5917500000000011,1.5212533250000035,1.6900000000000013,97.195,90.75,5.2,20.5,6.742157984588678,0.19010000000000016,143,5,35,2,5,48,33,40,0.257,0.611,0.132,-0.6249,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,2,0,5,1,1,0,1,10,8,1,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,2,6,2,1,7,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,17,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540710765920968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29360068800500344,0.207412901556756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24351631093293105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979639082933588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212088194484917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154460545832486,0.0,0.0,0.14184131932959054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479415384988347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4854603150521012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18603272001760449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619790457670592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869639850871811
mentalhealth,boostedheal,2020/01/13,How do you forget about someone and truly move on? My ex fucked me up real bad and i cant seem to forget about her and cant seem to move on... its been quite a while and not a day has gone by that i wasnt thinking about her for a couple minutes and it is kinda stopping me from growing or just idk moving on or focusing on something else... any ideas on how to switch it up since its been fucking me up real bad especially since ive been depressed/on depression pills even when we were together and i feel like its just pushing me downwards even more,4.518459627329193,4.537148373913045,5.387577639751555,85.69739130434783,69.6086956521739,7.962732919254659,28.60248447204969,7.447530270364453,1.4794223602484466,433,14,93,4,7,142,72,115,0.17800000000000002,0.764,0.057999999999999996,-0.9261,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,1,1,0,1,11,6,2,0,3,0,11,3,0,2,0,25,18,12,0,0,5,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,5,0,0,6,4,5,0,0,6,1,13,1,17,12,1,19,0,1,0,2,5,9,2,5,5,67,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927698242031296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683444554606482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17780412559321393,0.0,0.10363391124067856,0.0,0.138404939302771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342386668470931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21227287264519493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125138160155236,0.11479935505591188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971168091087771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18140322254552574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850664957242746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5123747723343779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17091714849248124,0.0,0.3658084050530202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925783652035225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658543847870756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361549465227344,0.12370958481626132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13434682860837135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296580452337048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,joeyyy313,2020/01/13,"Need help with Aboulomania PLEASE READ I have Aboulomania and its very bad, the indecisiveness effects everything i do this causes me to be stressed and have anxiety and i feel as if my brains gonna overheat sometimes. The biggest thing that it is effecting is my music, when i try to think of ideas for a beat i end up with 30 different ideas jumbling in my head and its like my brains fighting me i cant ever stick with one idea or even get one full idea started because its like multiple flows voices and shit and i just really need to find a way to help this, i would like any at home ways or just stuff you can do yourself to help treat this before i try therapy or medication.",5.91,5.978171764705883,6.2238235294117645,80.71970588235297,66.64705882352942,10.03529411764706,31.70588235294117,9.827888789773867,2.7709294117647048,544,20,111,11,8,175,90,136,0.113,0.742,0.145,0.5826,1,0,0,0,2,0,5.0,0,1,0,3,5,9,2,2,4,0,10,5,4,3,1,30,17,12,0,4,6,0,1,3,0,2,1,1,1,0,10,9,0,0,9,1,0,1,1,5,0,2,0,2,16,4,14,14,1,12,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,5,7,72,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543591771091727,0.0,0.09611021682455033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489974332716932,0.07658575913451776,0.0,0.10690589317651683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804997945467641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906146498464452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13126154227894918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127507144589653,0.0,0.0,0.08298054758603829,0.11364379684746667,0.0,0.0,0.11291238524724058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352468926812342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482785789793636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563895575116055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893746820599192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25263091339142624,0.0,0.12602186766030474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5673052256982472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841363342235633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656376282791515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863131057463179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17026667527442926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13790919502089485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566871841121746,0.0,0.08048481861071441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12896223452893044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425595042464498,0.0,0.08892490136359002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391414713769765,0.0,0.14382169640979084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436742513477703,0.0,0.08346612536390123,0.08050165558617994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17059545582665042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366180142647427,0.0,0.1994459856387019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924730036069246,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saraxxxxx,2020/01/13,I don’t have a personality anymore I’m drained to the point where I don’t have a personality anymore. I can’t build friendships cause of this. I have no motivation to go to school or do homework. I used to cry everyday but I’m out of tears. I keep telling myself things will get better but it’s been years and they’re not better. I can’t even imagine being happy. I can’t imagine having the energy to do any of the things that matter in life like build relationships or fall in love. Like it’s never gonna happen for me because I’m so empty.,1.1684210526315797,3.3662861052631605,3.5378070175438587,86.61881578947369,82.6842105263158,5.905263157894738,21.780701754385966,7.1686216300943375,0.7143649122807028,432,14,91,6,12,149,70,114,0.09,0.6409999999999999,0.26899999999999996,0.9737,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,3,6,0,0,5,0,14,2,0,3,1,15,24,6,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,1,2,6,2,0,1,3,0,0,2,8,0,0,0,1,0,10,6,12,20,0,10,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,2,5,58,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319284246305186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38479690995330657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11826218787672922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3431590788907998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929411671498015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213102752897474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813689150090216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135835440948712,0.0,0.11025615171282112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715558636753213,0.2065193814219531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17243842998651931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702977787098292,0.18955974756464855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17509492617320113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962676953513884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33879118484832943,0.0,0.0,0.18339516973948572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20828619526554595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19634099445432288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695668285492028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577734218653045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755596248465796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493131756076804
mentalhealth,TrippyHippie100,2020/01/13,"Symptoms changing? (Possible trigger warning) For backstory, I am 21 and diagnosed borderline personality disorder, major depressive disorder, panic disorder, and generalized anxiety. I am on 100mg of Zoloft. I use to be a very angry person, blow up on everyone for no reason, only hallucinate when under extreme amounts of stress, never hurt myself, etc. But for a while now I've felt a lot different. I'm never angry anymore, just completely numb with sadness. I don't argue with anyone, I just let them have whatever. I'm constantly in a dissociative state, I feel like nothing is real and I'm just a simulation which has been leading me to hurt myself because I feel like I have no consequences for my actions. I hallucinate daily now, auditory and visually. I've been very paranoid and have been suspicious of cameras being planted in my apartment. Or that my girlfriend poisoned my drink. And I have no real reason to think these things. My personal hygiene has went down the toilet, and I've always been a very clean person. I feel completely detached from the people I love almost like I don't know them. I don't know, just something is different. Should I talk to my doctor?",4.690906976744183,7.34558342790698,6.275058139534888,69.22049418604654,72.86046511627906,9.323255813953493,33.075581395348834,9.766711354998122,4.073097674418605,947,48,143,27,20,322,124,215,0.21100000000000002,0.691,0.09699999999999999,-0.972,2,0,2,0,0,4,32.0,0,0,2,1,7,13,2,2,8,0,21,8,0,5,2,35,34,11,0,1,6,0,4,3,1,1,6,0,1,4,4,9,1,0,9,1,0,3,8,9,0,0,6,4,26,4,21,24,4,19,0,4,0,1,10,8,0,3,10,104,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581600069069157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792819822231811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083936906631728,0.0,0.1047989787905216,0.07388884797750551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441713121094425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178776409269753,0.0,0.22159174822043945,0.11419470825274745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101578986000412,0.10725562290001447,0.0,0.22081107734618052,0.3633304001470593,0.10816054345773572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035190707972795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785305622103935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097484682121534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602939615652973,0.1509852759369504,0.10146241741760206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22624974165092704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614996618280853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805755251197456,0.0,0.1548791124672091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983919821919921,0.09537378798899354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16300268782210406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139585934855336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036889270032804,0.0,0.12398421064567795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326018353818227,0.36907749804585627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913015471561655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405574619739193,0.0,0.2172983857882304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135205023770252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104778491517115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983445481257062,0.0,0.08493575842356069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020428353777661,0.06771083513692001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126733247824624,0.0,0.2615732718268141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795970346007488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,giant_roselily,2020/01/13,"Realization - Mental health is like riding a horse 🐴 (explanation below) I personally struggle with anxiety and depression on and off. This week I've slowly started isolating myself, gorging on food, procrastinating, and distracting myself with Netflix and video games. I've been trying to snap out of it and pull myself together, and in doing so I realized something fascinating about mental health - ITS LIKE RIDING A HORSE!

OK now, I know it sounds wierd, but hear me out as I explain my analogy. 

1. A GREAT RIDE 
When we are in a healthy state of mind, we are in the passenger seat, grasping tightly at the reigns and gently guiding the horse in the path we wish to follow (aka goals/tasks). We are not beating it with a whip (inner critic) as it leads to a very frightened and agitaded horse. No, we lead it and encourage (self compassion) the horse gently, calm it during a difficult trek, and provide encouragement. You have control of your horse and you take good care of it. 

2. THE SLIPPING POINT
This stage is what I like to call the slipping point. During this stage, one starts to loosen the reigns and get distracted or lazy. If this is done for long enough, the horse will lose direction and start wandering off. This is what happens when we ignore taking care of our mental health. You will eventually begin to slip from the saddle into the next stage.

3. THE FALL
Sometimes, you don't realize how bad it's gotten until you fall off the horse. You hit the ground, and not only that, your boot is caught in the saddle! So now you are dragged by a wild, neglected horse, as it scrambles round and round in a panic or slumps down in defeat. This breaking point looks different for everyone. Some may not even notice that they've been dragged by the horse due to extreme disassociation and wake up one day wondering why the hell they've been feeling so terribly.

MAIN TAKEAWAY- the point of this analogy, is that mental health is something to be take care of ON A REGULAR BASIS, like a horse. If done well and consistently, you will manage your mental illness and proceed more smoothly in life. But the key is to be AWARE of when you're slipping and slowly starting to lose your grip. Readjust your hand, and get back on that damn horse.",5.179366007194247,7.013253479616308,5.3104129196642695,80.19964815647485,69.35971223021582,8.282044364508394,28.378971822541967,8.841846274778883,2.269964088729017,1779,64,320,32,32,559,217,417,0.14,0.698,0.162,0.9206,1,0,2,0,0,0,59.0,7,13,0,7,13,29,2,4,30,1,26,9,2,4,0,59,51,37,0,3,9,0,7,4,0,4,6,2,0,2,23,32,1,4,7,3,0,10,5,15,1,2,7,10,30,14,53,37,4,61,1,5,3,0,28,28,2,7,22,210,53,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694363457900138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728850586148398,0.07306580212532901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935579115001853,0.0,0.26766173027496337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814803549820156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05643563485734662,0.0,0.07537079825930985,0.0,0.0,0.0914275819046278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910281208048395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041949956950586,0.0,0.057798428078732735,0.0,0.0,0.08361796146287043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04424684206958932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581542259842447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914389835572716,0.0,0.0,0.07339783720830234,0.0,0.0964782451342607,0.0,0.0,0.07738332912542305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720690600337122,0.0986282502524077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04809229081270167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061809722931080835,0.17100860350059194,0.0,0.0,0.07744212023201684,0.07348495947495755,0.19579887983763586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4409390831726238,0.0,0.08835846965686213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306610400898367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962881616166952,0.0,0.0,0.11859582120556945,0.06655402988160446,0.0,0.1026721730623758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640890028546911,0.0,0.0,0.33089463632259314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129027529748483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473637872897412,0.08654797808518899,0.0,0.2477553916135706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148270886605298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973861257064815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941241333658227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722035386431703,0.0,0.0,0.07019390563484114,0.0,0.0786804999370363,0.0,0.07896265872101252,0.0,0.10063026331226954,0.0,0.0948990533683596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,divbid,2020/01/13,"Hi everyone. I am new to reddit and wanted to share my wifes facebook page/blog 
Http://www.facebook.com/mentalhealthprincess

She has amazing content and speaks to her experiences.",9.355384615384617,14.021820307692312,6.460384615384616,60.32211538461542,76.69230769230771,7.2153846153846155,29.57692307692308,8.07648339933343,3.1737230769230766,152,6,18,3,4,43,23,26,0.0,0.7859999999999999,0.214,0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,2,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5383363269826976,0.0,0.5510963994913141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5441185363665759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322977217809097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lhgrrdt,2020/01/13,"TW suicide i honestly don't know what to do. my dad has done probably the worst  thing yet. he told me to kill myself and even a week later, i still don't know how to cope. i have already thought of suicide, but never intend on actually going through with it. my mind just likes to wonder into 'what-if?'-type scenarios. though, i still don't know what to do. it doesn't make me want to cry, but i still just don't understand. does anybody have any advice?",2.5456521739130444,4.37885595652174,3.77326086956522,88.49293478260874,76.39130434782608,6.773913043478261,24.54347826086957,7.645422480735847,1.160952173913043,356,12,74,5,8,116,60,92,0.177,0.762,0.06,-0.8763,0,0,0,0,0,3,15.0,0,0,0,0,9,4,1,0,2,0,11,0,0,3,1,19,21,5,3,1,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,3,0,10,2,11,18,1,10,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,8,53,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.1738817563767604,0.0,0.0,0.17411921813393952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19663033429534654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12117114358943895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957266172393242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592990771863385,0.18234396584331589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768876739522954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012660010776989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971340549535524,0.0,0.2937755894978595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705163976323432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893911861637392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17991491686728395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13742638727736414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19211235173819027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4268936126107104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3898084725393362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11837744747524412,0.0,0.1750647501927101,0.14145809155482533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702623262221216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854956954236276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509746467573512,0.0,0.14292835475678284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19323280907713614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,greasywiener,2020/01/13,"I have been struggling with the feeling that if I stop worrying about something something bad will happen and am wondering if there is a term for what I am dealing with. I have OCD and depression for background info. Hello, lately I have been struggling with an overall feeling that if I stop worrying about something, something bad will happen.  My wife and I have been experiencing a challenging pregnancy and at one point were told that are baby might be have a moderate to severe deformity (thankfully this does not appear to be the case).  Also, what I believe is being triggered by my ocd is the fear that my wife will tire of me and no longer want to be with me or that she is still hung up on an ex.  She has done nothing to contribute to any of these fears, and in fact, she is nothing short of wonderful and showers me with love and affection.  It's kind of hard to describe, like I'm not worried when I'm worrying, but I worrydiagnosed with an illness or if I stop worrying about our relationship.

Factors that I think contribute to this are that two of my more serious relationships before meeting my wife involved me worrying less about my partner's feelings towards me and then later finding out there had been varying levels of infidelity or dishonesty, especially in regards to having residual feelings for a former partner.  Also, I have noticed my ocd, anxiety, and depression increase with traumatic events.  I am a first responder and have recently dealt with the murder of three children as well as responding to the suicide of a coworker/work friend without knowing who it was who killed themselves until I walked in the house and saw him dead on the floor.

I am not treating anything here as a diagnosis and am currently seeking/receiving help, but I would like some insights and some information, if possible, that could allow me to do some research.

tl;dr: everything in my life is fine, if not great, and it's freaking me the fuck out.",10.360833333333332,8.526889305555558,9.901666666666667,64.14750000000001,58.72222222222222,13.222222222222225,45.0,11.93303328291395,5.495166666666666,1570,81,259,38,16,510,188,360,0.228,0.6890000000000001,0.083,-0.9961,2,0,4,0,0,1,34.0,1,0,0,2,12,24,3,4,18,0,41,5,0,3,1,68,60,34,4,9,16,4,5,2,3,5,3,0,1,3,18,25,0,3,12,0,0,3,6,13,1,4,10,7,36,11,50,40,7,33,0,2,1,2,27,15,1,16,17,212,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410570233958708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059974775726654064,0.0,0.06746797896636783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257594339091003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14727619831083358,0.0,0.0,0.07504638726786839,0.0993641574678149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041553466800622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092388584958153,0.1519222989195914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771789467976765,0.09025282862408096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792628576294848,0.0,0.0,0.19848498089015107,0.1783736439679749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806074916629686,0.07501756049000258,0.0,0.0,0.06813827410524895,0.08153370268945864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723392305132114,0.0,0.0,0.15597888745106267,0.0,0.07900427887121395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591144129940658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176374881381084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757331971698648,0.09184022120115992,0.0484689796931579,0.0,0.09948639382825077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229385531360542,0.08617402488380088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795983045922278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355963384442928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16924856749421033,0.10040917132019753,0.0,0.0,0.0597623689012124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337160248279753,0.09942520414799072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708069043397365,0.18937416834915308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09963383652953428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27158343652116057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043164435865458,0.2212017774534525,0.0,0.18439851724146664,0.0,0.09646965038189967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119695773755745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056510995243731585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136574422409944,0.0,0.08427290960023723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861524807569684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05201896001513463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929677478970336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850156298315639,0.19128472413695516,0.06420610191777279,0.5373902177589435,0.0,0.06265031109577338,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DPkitten,2020/01/13,"What’s wrong with me? I’ve had depression all my life and was diagnosed with bipolar disorder when I was thirteen (though I’m not sure it’s an accurate diagnosis tbh). A few years back I experienced one of the worst depressive episodes of my life for several months. After being severely depressed for a while, I became irrationally paranoid and would constantly throw myself into panic attacks by convincing myself that I had a bomb in my brain or that the government inserted a chip in my brain in order to read all my thoughts or that I had terminal cancer, etc. I kind of ran to the Army in order to distract myself from those thoughts because I knew if they pursued I’d end up committing suicide, and it worked well enough to keep me alive.
So, I just got out of the Army a couple months ago and I’ve basically become a housewife (my husband and I are trying to have a baby, though now I’m not sure if it’s the best idea; I’ve had a history of miscarriage so we thought it’d be best if I took a break from working while pregnant). Because I stay at home so much, or do leisurely activities that don’t require all my focus and attention, I pretty much have all the time in the world to let my brain wander as much as it wants. I’ve been depressed for about a month and a half now mostly due to miscarrying this past Thanksgiving. At times I’ve felt suicidal, and it’s been getting worse lately. I noticed a week or two ago that I’ve started dissociating often. Sometimes I convince myself that nothing and nobody in my life is real. This past week I’ve become very afraid of eating meat because I’ve convinced myself that the negative energies trapped in it from the animal’s death is going to try to kill me (and so now I overcook all the meat I have so as to kill off any chances of becoming fatally sick from it). I have a very clingy cat that meows incessantly when she wants to be pet and today I told my husband that I get worried that she’s not really meowing for attention and that she’s trying to tell me something important. I told him that I get worried our cat is trying to tell me that the world is about to end. 
Right now these little delusions that I have are harmless compared to the ones I had before, but I’m worried that they’ll just get worse with time. It’s also concerning to me that I apparently need a constant distraction or else I’ll immediately sink into this world of depression and paranoia. I was awake all night a couple nights ago because I couldn’t stop thinking about killing myself. I know it’s past the point of concern.
I was wondering though if there are any psychology experts here who could maybe tell me if these irrational fears are symptoms of any mental illnesses? And if so, which ones? I was thinking maybe depression with general anxiety, but there’s so much about psychology that I don’t know.
I do plan on going back to therapy and getting a help from a professional, just for the record.",6.784793110918546,6.526087840554595,7.291407603986138,74.90243202989603,64.87521663778163,10.67870450606586,35.0156520797227,10.270032843473604,3.503221880415944,2352,98,444,50,32,775,255,577,0.185,0.769,0.045,-0.9974,1,1,1,0,0,3,41.0,2,0,2,6,31,28,4,5,32,0,38,13,3,0,9,77,68,46,7,12,19,2,1,0,0,2,9,0,2,0,36,23,1,3,13,1,0,5,7,18,1,5,22,2,62,10,65,37,17,67,0,6,0,0,17,21,0,14,37,314,98,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641822258909946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04937221416598698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259527842193251,0.0,0.04722974335741339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702363968910596,0.0,0.09494611049214123,0.0,0.15054073825924386,0.2045557941845404,0.052534871577068314,0.0,0.12958138339848352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067615766454104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334346575398788,0.0,0.04929312663126924,0.136624835765261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190514062300876,0.0626632246356542,0.0,0.0,0.07075760961145293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317384482013894,0.051574550787677725,0.0,0.10936387909854496,0.06379232000219276,0.06885468879204444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947291775566589,0.0,0.0,0.05927859148832421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16127895331019773,0.0,0.07017476496279726,0.0,0.04937787638598709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041381979973427636,0.0,0.06192869669499838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969519240592205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487596885467308,0.20491333456400146,0.06429109251043533,0.06785967230008959,0.0,0.06964365792556358,0.0,0.0,0.06313174548386262,0.13082307389133654,0.0,0.061878143674290224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12404913746458895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221783404938884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14783711934319865,0.0,0.18153945053830672,0.045778276541529314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587470141667047,0.0,0.0592397054782546,0.07028963168657347,0.0,0.0,0.12550670950328954,0.0,0.0,0.07243676585801953,0.0,0.0,0.17680900198959093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058362788524044626,0.0,0.0,0.0628101964873069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06175515480785744,0.07027186952942732,0.03955123037638403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05272429683796627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949374506534787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04752927315865218,0.06106090323259367,0.0,0.043698790911611364,0.06580497048080322,0.0,0.05161610658066459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506368203463634,0.0,0.11637551226196302,0.06416988618928428,0.0,0.0,0.1618863730604458,0.0,0.07060329528348709,0.0,0.0,0.07911900854667439,0.1819731336376881,0.14704029320752696,0.10800055568659954,0.0,0.05852082934959816,0.11798746467226448,0.06859368683253865,0.1676654129569195,0.0,0.060309492267205035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188136993337672,0.0728298718554789,0.0,0.09904571716899137,0.0,0.055510278798409377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695271273566339,0.089892650173143,0.18809517089723032,0.12583350494584794,0.04385722174648953,0.06750130048521827,0.0,0.03975753602009679
mentalhealth,SMASHLIKEANDSUB,2020/01/13,"I feel like shit 

So overtime I’ve started to get worse in the mental health department. It started out as just randomly getting nervous and scared to talk to people I don’t know to now where I don’t really talk to people I do know. I feel like I am just a piece of shit now. I don’t really feel emotion anymore either everything is just the same. It’s come to the point to where I don’t know what real anymore. Sometimes I don’t recognize myself in the mirror, or don’t know if I actually did just talk or of it was in my head. I just wanna know what I can do to start feeling better.",2.8472444444444416,3.7067635200000018,4.836266666666667,85.12657777777778,73.80000000000003,7.795555555555558,25.88888888888889,8.167268648758528,1.4973822222222215,460,15,99,7,9,159,64,125,0.128,0.794,0.079,-0.7845,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,2,2,5,0,13,4,3,0,0,25,28,6,0,2,9,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,9,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,2,4,14,3,16,26,3,14,0,0,0,0,3,7,2,4,7,70,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.13702098837621055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785001821689071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418221601051717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095173802931047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15794359942676905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261924515042821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839843034841269,0.2006194494381204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671801897166062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410230700592866,0.14925044353375516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.385831368708793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719555137553674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14150137338249744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19468676791110726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327338834075934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15981858257354933,0.1799019044212731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057601557716326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28825997238551165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388701776492114,0.0,0.29815111809770617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3385713935375964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309091628966525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JoeyTKIA,2020/01/13,"Is it possible to have a “calm” panic attack I’m currently in bed and okay-ish, but for the last 15 minutes give or take, Ive just been laying here crying and my head and ribs were hurting, and I felt really nauseous. However, I wasn’t hyperventilating, in fact I felt almost half conscious, like I was in a state of pure calm, but an awful painful calm that I couldn’t pull myself out of. This has never happened before, but I have had panic attacks before. Was this a panic attack, or some kind of depressive episode?",7.5638235294117635,6.210597539215687,8.099333333333334,73.32900000000005,63.80392156862745,10.512941176470589,33.14509803921568,9.3871,2.8586250980392163,407,13,77,6,5,136,71,102,0.327,0.589,0.084,-0.9862,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,2,14,3,3,5,1,12,3,2,0,3,20,18,9,0,1,6,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,9,0,1,8,2,9,5,9,9,1,9,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,4,4,52,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193818990021113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5178529009074799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582263788121485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16667103616466775,0.0,0.0,0.13068698753877125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913740066663893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455556485072628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13417655647389445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557213289124527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243278893291352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580060587422588,0.0,0.12368224618291215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412883952023161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702546483945092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145408735628344,0.5340762196288884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17105560550272378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720373050380493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408396331330688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LuckyIbex64,2020/01/13,"I need help. Hey I was wondering if anyone can help me out with my mental health. Anyways straight to the point, i don’t know why but I easily get offended by people’s jokes about me and stuff or even if I feel like people are trying to make me feel less than them. I know I’m not perfect and I know I shouldn’t get mad at these kind of things but I do, and I also just feel like I can’t truly be myself, like I’m always stuck in my head and thinking of the right things to say to people to not seem like a jerk because I already started arguments with like 3 or 4 of my own family members. I don’t know if I’m depressed or just anxious but I am for sure one or the other because I just can never be myself I used to always speak before I thought lol and I would always make lots of friends and I felt like my family truly loved me. I know all this might just be in my head but still, I honestly don’t feel like myself anymore.",1.0858140814081416,2.6661313217821814,3.09854785478548,92.83553355335535,79.84158415841584,5.8750275027502745,20.133113311331133,6.691623216298621,0.14041496149614918,725,18,166,7,18,245,104,202,0.10400000000000001,0.618,0.278,0.9899,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,9,18,3,0,4,1,16,4,2,3,4,52,42,18,0,6,17,0,5,7,1,3,1,2,0,0,6,9,0,0,14,1,0,0,8,4,0,1,4,7,34,14,20,32,4,10,0,1,0,1,8,7,0,11,10,113,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227157877649866,0.08892936997806589,0.2775905710964764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562826150389986,0.11028395501836642,0.07775604763285285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557719899313586,0.0,0.094625957335448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957793805886744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344883918217318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096654579944857,0.0,0.22491125073929769,0.23833133068714998,0.10677276446466268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591552042845574,0.0,0.11619844036468945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22825367251280645,0.1182040821155739,0.0,0.0,0.14907467569145805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158012952980609,0.3055725779421472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.380298767819486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945412084128855,0.10036546792630276,0.0,0.1484583514480342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206693637053328,0.1179693019583055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245595949643372,0.0857669669070841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535434516956002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312834403313736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512321760894287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496715064415706,0.0,0.08843345794702683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10123545710871644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07871038417495174,0.0,0.08880722999174957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730136107570594,0.0,0.0,0.10480794877395552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775728040733635,0.07125468952729425,0.0,0.08828312886254808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549985246379233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096044088461934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003438296608366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059541307764128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07899575023699318,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kklag,2020/01/13,"Question Should I journal? Is it actually helpful (asking because I don’t want my dad to read through it, and if it’s even worth the risk)",3.9053571428571416,4.975238821428572,5.041428571428573,83.85357142857143,71.5,7.028571428571429,35.42857142857143,7.1686216300943375,2.3668714285714283,109,6,22,1,2,36,25,28,0.0,0.778,0.222,0.6124,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,5,2,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,15,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.409217323860936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3920281847103765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255627005170653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769714514363205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810761188223332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4697590369509838,0.0,0.4194555031395511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24733879007977186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaynavy163,2020/01/13,"How can I get better? I have bad health anxiety and just a general hum of anxiety in general. The list of things I've been paranoid in the past include facial symmetry, golden ratio, my face, my intelligence, what others think about me, and a myriad of severe health problems and. currently I'm most paranoid about is my hair and my lymph nodes/cancer despite many people telling me my hair is fine, and my lymph nodes are of normal size but I still constantly post medical and hairloss questions on reddit looking for reassurance, I'm constantly feeling the nodes in my neck and checking my hairline and pulling on my hair. I'm so tired of this constant feeling of anxiety, the constant checking, it's exhausting. How can I get better? Sorry for any typos I'm pretty drunk right now.",6.972823439878237,7.707009417808219,7.305159817351601,71.58177321156775,64.41095890410959,10.324505327245053,36.77016742770167,10.25414643259724,4.050985692541857,629,30,103,14,9,205,86,146,0.168,0.705,0.127,-0.5606,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,8,7,0,0,6,0,7,14,6,2,0,21,17,12,0,2,2,0,5,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,5,8,1,0,4,1,2,1,0,3,0,0,1,6,15,4,15,16,1,16,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,2,8,64,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528933108203763,0.0,0.32158412468918995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699793997818912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478571177804259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6056983657302093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417021156847777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146418329761847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29789116308404234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766912328155092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420640498256276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14116049341103531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729206569734165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376450257370148,0.0971445483795099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420034830377114,0.14255679170977426,0.0,0.13408003373526395,0.0,0.0,0.15697128827197854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966538910435015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15830057755125632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685768502159864,0.0,0.0,0.11190344935231633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247481701845725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309236053210122,0.08978599536741963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16105227313846646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BobRossSaves,2020/01/13,App recommend: Something like Moodpath where you can record moods and maybe get reports but doesn't charge you $24.99 to add more specific emotions One helpful way to manage emotions is to be able to accurately classify them. Moodpath charges you $24.99 to do that...  What should I use instead?,8.642767295597487,9.039244094339628,7.107547169811323,75.57125786163523,60.88679245283019,10.085534591194973,42.19496855345911,9.725611199111238,4.252640251572326,239,13,40,4,3,71,43,53,0.048,0.82,0.131,0.5499,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,3,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,5,8,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,5,1,5,6,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,24,7,2,0.3092061620390255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6956306285645704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615474576516884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20725437262859567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106251216573874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106391499011241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20952609771601455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380420099839337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670548462578887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24543345906441974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sugarblink,2020/01/13,"Protein Shake Diet and eating issues  

Hello, recently I have lost pretty much all of my interest in eating, the only time I want to eat is with friends, or a girlfriend, unfortunately, I don't have either one, and I am not sure when things will change.

It's because of this that I don't eat that often anymore, unless I truly need it.

My question is this: Since I don't want to eat, can I survive off of protein shakes? It sounds strange, but I need calories, except eating alone makes me feel guilty

There is not a problem with my social skills, there has always been an external reason for me not having a social life, I know this for a fact, for example: I am currently in a college where no one has time for anything due to the fact that it is a cheap place, and most of the people there are middle aged adults trying to get their life together. 

I used to eat alone all the time due to other external problems, but the guilt drags me down when I eat alone, and I don't enjoy eating with my family either, for example: we had pizza today and it was too hard to even take a bite, and this problem is only getting worse. I would talk to my parents, but they are already very disappointed in me to begin with.",10.427561088059015,6.150124112033197,10.080719225449515,70.48294144767175,60.99170124481327,12.53683725218995,38.39603503918857,9.444778638647367,3.4821614568925767,945,28,185,11,9,311,130,241,0.175,0.76,0.065,-0.9786,2,3,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,0,2,3,9,12,0,3,13,0,24,13,0,3,5,43,37,13,0,8,11,1,2,0,2,2,2,1,0,1,14,11,11,0,4,0,1,2,8,8,0,2,4,3,27,4,29,31,6,22,0,2,0,0,12,8,0,4,12,138,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25623215227399176,0.0910041466841607,0.0,0.0686189704690723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817848901285737,0.0,0.0,0.06786313651241427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050270986027599364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872389226455618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7594569699304986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05446853299362469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774234449145571,0.0,0.041697683782129055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371363266225165,0.0,0.08617098177840192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387404023429547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607389683339188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04532158773076565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649745658177052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002223628841327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05504721860865716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060622574905626225,0.12229615063657966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176325403594274,0.1254394104810865,0.0,0.0,0.09156960421897624,0.0,0.0,0.05717208440976985,0.0,0.08616023700014666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389836655554699,0.0,0.23672872438802225,0.0,0.0,0.09238167136189787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478958865777701,0.08142600022001509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821737581833404,0.0,0.0,0.16812900176861892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07772396785780508,0.0,0.06200475836402693,0.06628367710092851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05478726684130238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426113459186862,0.0,0.07816886853553158,0.0,0.0,0.05598953299640416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122482342105105,0.0,0.06804373332583903,0.09728209155275123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404069811379639,0.058582037184654774,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Norcom14,2020/01/13,"Nighttime anxiety only? I've noticed that in the evenings, starting between 6 and 7, I get suddenly anxious. Sometimes it feels like I'm stir-crazy and need to go somewhere. Sometimes I just feel like I could bounce out of my skin. I notice my heart beating faster. 

I do not feel dread or anxiety about my day, or the following day. I sleep well at night and look forward to my 1030ish bedtime. When this anxiety kicks in almost nightly, it comes on like a wave and ruins my downtime. 

Anyone else experience this? I'm trying to stay off my depression medicine and apart from my evenings I feel great! Suggestions on how to reset my brain appreciated!",4.075044709388976,6.448563926229513,4.50102831594635,82.54657973174369,73.672131147541,7.387183308494784,32.40238450074516,8.296473431620573,2.678252459016394,517,26,93,9,11,163,83,122,0.126,0.7190000000000001,0.155,0.6931,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,0,1,3,0,2,4,4,1,0,19,15,9,0,2,4,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,4,0,0,4,1,3,1,0,0,6,15,5,15,14,0,21,0,2,1,0,1,9,0,3,12,54,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454867384749322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334388769863354,0.1641361085718841,0.0,0.1015899999220346,0.14886656028454956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16219145681343022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251542899847007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600207566020106,0.0,0.0,0.187399791154525,0.0,0.12513788396858816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213709770809688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19192507319875304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212129438171262,0.0,0.0,0.2938515349051267,0.2075901112348212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759079191070005,0.0,0.08257153634769977,0.0,0.0,0.1601825073361598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17216910170678393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21294375882350505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200683214971488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773053895906527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726892530349866,0.0,0.0,0.3308267797263731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104994329542932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453947174048299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28739063641275703,0.0,0.10283686176994128,0.1548595856301209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864223091850678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13063297058148354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theworldsucksss,2020/01/13,Disassociation What’s everyone’s like?,6.259999999999998,2.7247116666666638,10.756666666666668,21.505000000000024,182.33333333333331,14.133333333333335,35.333333333333336,7.793537801064563,8.052733333333336,34,2,4,2,3,13,5,6,0.0,0.545,0.455,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8903739101873643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4552299419608328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reptilicus1,2020/01/13,"Trying to not get a depressive episode again End of Last year my mental health was really bad, physical problems and. I changed my major last minute before transferring. ( everyone from my year is graduating this year) , quit my part time job, cut lots of social ties and finally around new year I was better finally but only couple days of 2020 in, I’m scared that it i am going to go into depression again, physically I keep getting worse, romantically I’m having a hard time connecting, the new part time job makes me feel like shit, financially I need a lot of money rn since school sent me email about how I don’t qualify to get money and family stuff too and the only thing that makes me happy  playing instrument I can’t do that because I hurt myself last year. I don’t mind being alone and not having a social life but everything keeps getting worse and worse. It’s as if the world is against me and my family.  I know I have to keep moving one day at a time but it gets hard  when u r out of coping mechanisms. I started mediating, reading to cope but it barely helps anymore. 

I don’t know why I wrote this but I wanted to tell someone since I don’t have anyone who I can tell this without me regretting telling them. Even though I have close friends I don’t have a best friend. None of my close friends can tell how I feel or what I’m going through without me telling them. I say that because I am always able to tell and I go out of my way to focus on their problems or concerns. Ik it’s stupid I shouldn’t do that.  

I really am trying my best but it jst keeps getting worse I don’t know if it will even get better. 

Sry if I make no sense or sound like I’m over exaggerating things.",3.2400442716769247,4.738160064139947,4.535873015873019,85.16931216931219,73.72303206997086,7.7636972249217155,24.948601662887373,8.401726058763845,1.5034907461397258,1334,42,276,23,27,441,172,343,0.16,0.6940000000000001,0.146,-0.4827,2,1,0,0,0,2,25.0,0,0,3,5,11,22,3,1,9,0,27,3,1,5,0,54,59,25,0,9,16,0,4,2,3,2,2,2,0,0,20,14,0,4,5,2,2,6,14,11,0,1,4,6,45,11,30,52,8,41,0,4,0,0,20,11,1,8,25,171,65,7,0.06955668584762861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203974933926037,0.0,0.0,0.05787673469515445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898154192181091,0.04863565201816259,0.0,0.0,0.06192019727815187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058076927298061076,0.08480222018179512,0.0,0.05918761656434639,0.0,0.1459909009811841,0.12303447233621588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358175073938182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696314990109214,0.0,0.08971661618134279,0.0,0.11981814319630467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061606578142847326,0.0,0.0,0.09188306999526168,0.0,0.0,0.06646439411369606,0.06251306419885412,0.0,0.13114370606126394,0.0,0.07033990061825404,0.04969131026762888,0.0,0.15239189888426605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16121796882917525,0.0,0.2543834825633379,0.0,0.15812267000664693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404438548611843,0.12461825638805125,0.0,0.0,0.07393550443876183,0.0,0.0,0.04662238033165435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446187080548095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804855586215145,0.2473007132721467,0.0,0.0,0.11467960643211407,0.17009394771902914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491299442497637,0.0679637665224777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11826921387405873,0.0,0.0,0.13928888375942833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009677942730137,0.0,0.07023242432386298,0.0,0.0,0.07392774919618947,0.0,0.05157540120645048,0.0,0.13435656125356712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0471334104715318,0.10580198786285537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15064622504685588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311270904113615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739820973006495,0.0695755088746577,0.0,0.08911958810944838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531426838697985,0.06963837679543078,0.07039507953202853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713989384661567,0.11507601862423401,0.0,0.0,0.14180856348332016,0.0589351541987186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04923258024924885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962576400424667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647736555951471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242074271795933,0.0,0.06833909068671154,0.0,0.16223625151121035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444884773953356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04102633546452005,0.05521085962861903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276409012708423,0.0,0.0,0.13410032604198235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835368210906076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22396112590173725
mentalhealth,Shatallya,2020/01/13,"Need your advice for NPD treatment  Hey guys. 

It seems i have a narcisstic personality disorder. They say there is no medications for it and psychotherapy with a doctor is needed. 
Is this real to deal with it by myself? I do want to work on it.
 Internet doesn't help. Are there any books, websites or any sources of information about self-treatment? Your own experience is also appreciated. 

Sorry for any mistakes.",3.748813813813815,6.901157635135133,5.31666666666667,71.58944444444447,80.75675675675676,8.153753753753753,27.141141141141144,8.841846274778883,2.920701501501501,331,14,54,9,9,111,57,74,0.147,0.7929999999999999,0.06,-0.6925,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,1,1,4,1,0,0,2,0,8,2,0,0,0,11,12,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,5,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,6,0,11,12,1,1,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,2,0,39,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106504686542015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17238958129234913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4397807167646397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222410516503433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470595030062295,0.2206428922606201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108667821122304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134461243550683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14449062739386176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171619923805494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31968175049829045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882255858601801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24536347760465874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17142825583361995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962449308616001,0.22488434576349972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24131062860699865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271475396316213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15693600729054874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hotdogitis,2020/01/13,"What are some ways to make life more bearable when it feels unbearable ? Currently, I'm feeling really unfulfilled and unsupported. I feel like at the moment in my life there are more aspects in my life that i dislike than like, for example my job and my living situation. Im fairly active so thats not an issue, but my life of current just feels really unstructured, this was fine for a little bit but now this is not fine. 

I was seeing a professional for some counselling, but then i used up all of my free sessions and i dont make enough to pay for more. I feel like I cant talk to people in my life anymore because i had some stuff happen about a year ago, and i realised that it was too heavy to just spring onto them (this was the point where i sought professional help). But recently i just feel like ive been on a kind of downwards spiral, and my heads going back into some unhealthy thought patterning. it just makes me feel a bit helpless and like no one cares about me. idk, writing it out makes me feel childish.

But anyway, advice/support would be appreciated plz",5.681640539555232,6.090753161137442,6.175071090047393,79.69915785636168,67.15165876777252,9.14633612832665,29.974845060153108,9.057496981413335,2.3326708713087867,851,29,166,14,13,276,124,211,0.10400000000000001,0.74,0.156,0.8973,3,2,0,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,1,0,14,11,0,0,8,0,14,6,1,5,1,40,33,14,0,1,11,0,8,5,0,1,5,0,0,0,12,8,0,0,9,0,2,1,5,1,0,1,7,9,24,11,23,24,11,26,0,1,1,0,4,13,0,4,16,117,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989670796926754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176247560207482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08665496969460458,0.0,0.06869740658169421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460660021848031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489936172818074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207689431688074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644334934596573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558530417085005,0.24152651695069016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404677452985844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996552078899625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565687638355054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553662181447482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217291953607748,0.11762358278765385,0.11183171560541083,0.0,0.0,0.11735378404123087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3979966265301311,0.2752837420770905,0.11294930644468748,0.09951114211859773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30089731328318736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636458233766401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812804637777776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653255082549824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14438972389220994,0.0,0.1112720375201008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980277605254106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667312835268732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290080253194138,0.0,0.1278841697272904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057941917097642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946669562160857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733170243724737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945149934756813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005480586055537,0.0,0.0,0.07257144207584572
mentalhealth,DR-Badtouch,2020/01/13,"It occurs to me that the hardest thing about getting a new job when suffering from certain Mental illness’s . It’s that the Telephone interviews never get scheduled on a day you feel ok . Oh you say , yes hoping it lands right, but it never does . It’s a passing thought after finding the job I was phone interviewed for ( & still waiting to hear about ) 2 days ago , was put up on a Job search site same day as my Telephone interview . I got notified as I’m a skills match. Ironically . Lol",3.496236842105265,5.412719084210528,4.4433552631578985,84.35661184210528,73.94736842105263,7.276315789473685,29.769736842105264,8.07648339933343,2.140815789473685,383,17,73,6,8,124,69,95,0.023,0.8590000000000001,0.11800000000000001,0.7615,3,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,1,4,4,0,0,8,3,2,1,0,0,3,10,11,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,8,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,4,3,6,3,12,7,1,19,0,1,0,0,10,6,0,1,11,42,14,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16511997934050213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018269669163994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3603924701139485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630089588748443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418534198890847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17025035762588012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946401490961757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14897971844062924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20994346817295675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850113474419305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5545423151299189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877196039417816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873307967633362,0.1799038463076386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18725604519431904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15907632066836913,0.0,0.14813194898208207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875804212313015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375165707159035,0.0,0.0,0.1478801377243354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lanadeltwerk,2020/01/13,"Am I jealous? So here’s some back story. My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 years. Key word boyfriend. Well my cousin (F22) met this guy and it was two weeks from when he asked her dad permission to start talking to her then they got engaged. Weird, very religious people, basically traded his daughter for a goat. Well my bf (21) and I (21) have been talking about getting married. I found out he bought a ring and I know my time is coming. But I just can’t help but feel jealous that my cousin happened first. We went looking at wedding dresses and I’m just like well that’s supposed to be me. I cried over it all day yesterday, and today I just feel down. I feel like I’m in this hole of just depression. I have a great job. She doesn’t have a job at all. My aunts paid for her wedding dress and it’s like she’s not contributing anything to the wedding except showing up. Am I wrong for feeling like this? Is this jealousy? Just send feed back please. Thank you all.",0.8925423011844345,3.3380373299492376,1.8071890862944184,96.72587669204741,86.86802030456852,4.704653130287649,22.42153130287648,6.21433560688645,0.2896160744500849,762,28,165,7,24,237,120,197,0.11,0.718,0.172,0.8807,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,1,1,1,14,15,2,0,5,0,14,1,0,0,3,30,34,12,0,0,9,5,4,4,1,0,0,1,0,1,9,10,1,0,6,1,3,3,3,5,3,2,9,6,27,10,19,24,4,22,0,1,1,0,27,7,0,1,16,104,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995055634206322,0.0,0.13626875929007715,0.0,0.0,0.22416554992083929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556194618680708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16011384724360775,0.09400509760887853,0.0,0.12554548673254054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2948086766916144,0.20826627979725065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398596140504625,0.0,0.1598216420806501,0.0,0.0,0.07615516859414745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165800131950028,0.1607042584690416,0.0,0.14432831949945416,0.12889776869035086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770188846571427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28929463729116844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010755090308108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848498205905885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240423636039965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105373380337032,0.0,0.0,0.1600040384145464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317182499422067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343176090365234,0.0,0.1341990169034837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499559673641288,0.0,0.13816631165804394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238930304199904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120269767763126,0.0,0.0,0.11692231278040925,0.0,0.3931754163052683,0.13512379192651314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593689943190797,0.0,0.09386661422197223
mentalhealth,Patty_Pimp,2020/01/13,"What’s going on with me? Sorry if I’m doing any of this wrong. I have diagnosed anxiety and depression and am medicated for it. I’m in counseling as well. I did have an incident recently that I’d like some help figuring out what’s wrong with me. I’m 23, a father of 2, and a husband. And I am issue I don’t understand where when I feel irritable or anxious, any sound (mainly voices) make my ears feel like they are quacking. Like thunder is surrounding them. It makes me uncomfortably angry and panicked. Not to the point of physical violence, but that I need everyone to get away from me immediately. What is it? What can I do? I don’t like feeling this abrasive. I don’t want to hurt my families feeling.",1.8427659574468085,4.237408453900713,4.4788368794326265,79.69400000000002,81.48226950354609,8.582695035460992,27.130496453900708,9.21078282632365,2.8246232624113463,556,25,108,17,15,196,90,141,0.18600000000000005,0.6970000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.871,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,0,3,9,0,0,4,0,14,3,1,2,0,23,28,10,0,3,4,2,4,4,0,0,2,4,0,0,11,8,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,4,1,0,1,8,17,5,15,27,2,10,0,2,0,0,5,7,0,3,6,75,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354819881712385,0.0,0.13245146507346472,0.1955986798686427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16267053166138026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14912504700384996,0.17573324179237249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16544248862292527,0.0,0.0,0.16322078450676758,0.0,0.3501787193866905,0.1236911002234858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045839393957912,0.0,0.09839933238859737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605195128084322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18534972563661647,0.0,0.0,0.1807129571226767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33834942211108304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311443079056624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744201227052669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838096007803185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16367306481603253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709546544048434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19381581919713325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18024462698629468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212233375238876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15567346402554058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37860235978724505,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zizaum,2020/01/13,"Is therapy a viable avenue for me, right now? I posted this in r/depression to no response. I’m really hoping to get some input because I don’t want to go to a therapist if I’m going to waste their time.

I was looking for therapists online, and I'm getting hung up on one question that seems like it'll be asked in the consultation: ""What do you hope to gain from therapy?"" Because the answer is nothing. Or, I have no fucking idea. I'm cosmically pissed that I'm stuck in my shitty, flawed body, and that I'll likely never be able to date a woman I'm attracted to. And I frankly have no interest in being happy on any other terms. I don't want to find fulfillment in anything else. I don't want to feel comfortable with my life as it is. In my brain, that's tantamount to giving up, and if I'm giving up I might as well just fucking kill myself. And the only reason I want to go to a therapist is because I *do* want to kill myself, so I’m clearly out of my fucking mind.

But I feel like someone with my dumbass mindset would have nothing to gain from therapy. Therapists can’t bend reality, which is really the only avenue through which I even want to be happy.

Not to mention, I don’t know that I could bear honestly spelling out my thoughts and feelings in front of another human being. They’re severely fucking embarrassing and I don’t want to subject myself or anyone else to that process if it’s not going to be productive.",3.8112791461412168,4.947537031034488,5.746059113300492,78.4624712643678,71.79310344827587,8.83415435139573,30.01642036124795,9.23628265651192,2.7017799671592777,1129,47,216,24,21,392,145,290,0.124,0.6940000000000001,0.182,0.8736,0,0,0,0,0,2,32.0,0,1,1,2,5,20,7,1,8,0,27,8,3,1,2,47,65,16,2,14,9,0,3,3,0,3,1,0,0,2,14,11,0,0,11,0,0,5,12,8,1,1,3,4,27,12,45,52,2,27,0,0,1,4,10,16,5,11,8,146,41,1,0.08705954254094303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059203474326762824,0.09128952121552937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06087405637981647,0.0892027895539497,0.07164258555742742,0.0,0.08138892010140976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921206722649894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096703525594021,0.0,0.09718724179508377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950996061949194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07498425642091687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14545415311291476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057502006770192085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13205976166580186,0.062195354586568816,0.0,0.0,0.07957084466582548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.321940576881292,0.09097003545507144,0.16703089231348978,0.19791177725585232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18535300380089867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729395390882759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827962660478562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926369697544147,0.0,0.047845647776769966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06149272955321927,0.12759868481445386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731080892283143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235641673051437,0.08790532008053352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714568625812925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707195815376302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05899379914441321,0.1324254103112451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337897627389926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752661215816616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154514447744288,0.08951170947842417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743483736447065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925573780152785,0.0,0.098352502557699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376526787604708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2986805226298048,0.40433135601475984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911555213223969,0.0507651193699192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3594498167793178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827698417504708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061844601160782914,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coyfish101,2020/01/13,"Does anyone feel like they're in denial? Or desensitized to their issues? 2019 was a rough year for me. I went through the whole progression of suicidal ideation to planning out my suicide to having to call a hotline because I wanted to attempt the suicide. Then, I talked to a therapist over the phone who had me answer some questions where they later scored me under ""severe depression"" but I couldn't believe it. In fact, I told the therapist over the phone that that was wrong. I probably more mild/moderate depression rather than severe depression. this all progressed in the course of June - November.

Long story short, I suffered childhood sexual abuse which I just now only recently addressed back in August. I grieved it, and it manifested into those suicidal thoughts. I identified with the abuse so so much that it was hard to feel like a survivor when all I felt like was a victim. And when I think about these things that has happened to me, I think to myself ""oh this isn't THAT bad"" when to others, it seems to be absolutely horrible.

I'm an undergrad studying psychology so I've learned the symptoms of depression and can clearly see that that was what I experienced, but at the same time I just think it's so bizarre that I could ever be depressed. I feel like I'm talking around in circles at this point, but is it normal to feel this way?? To feel that the abnormal things that's happened to you are normal?",5.67114725014784,7.154672097378278,5.756443918785727,78.82101714961564,67.72659176029964,9.06674551547408,32.404691504041004,9.414487439383343,3.035536329588015,1138,49,203,23,19,359,150,267,0.257,0.672,0.071,-0.9963,0,0,0,0,2,2,30.0,0,1,2,4,16,14,1,0,16,0,16,1,0,0,5,40,35,15,5,6,7,0,8,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,29,7,0,0,14,0,0,1,2,10,0,0,10,10,26,4,35,21,7,33,0,7,1,0,11,16,0,4,19,151,55,2,0.0,0.22674830885503355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06690699204085515,0.0,0.0,0.08518224747784522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357785495842466,0.07989514587030913,0.05833027044267192,0.0,0.0,0.10780715344670153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770773413315842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639875931564334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4120779315445097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08373686017482716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655490889111156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419126183947612,0.2050777133203228,0.09187509807531588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16923245043696228,0.0,0.08571729114669722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998729899109192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18699250435001133,0.0,0.0,0.08468051143584354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703413930897424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18750705555619224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277472868260472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045570727927403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316741265816606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719200676762362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447995731157843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762506253772213,0.0871103937150658,0.0,0.2161994944042529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4186667976343407,0.0,0.0,0.09945605047453901,0.0,0.15382013032763006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22220134838687472,0.1271411740328106,0.1839382436561236,0.0,0.07596526289554638,0.05579620678543135,0.0,0.0,0.09143359867581606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056439023360168324,0.07595235989354666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870336023811196,0.0,0.10683178384508288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046193650453437,0.0,0.061619674647612935
mentalhealth,GiocoGiacobbe,2020/01/13,"With the stress of my grades slipping, I’ve had a lot of suicidal thoughts. I just think the stress of grades and everyday life is too much for me. I really think the only reason I haven’t tried killing myself is because of my track team and because it would make my family sad. My mom has always said I’m very anxious and I feel like that anxiety is just overwhelming me where all I can think is me, working some crappy job that I hate, barely getting paid, and just flat out hating my life. How can I get over these thoughts.",5.887861635220126,5.600085962264148,5.88301886792453,84.3505031446541,66.73584905660377,9.330817610062894,29.930817610062896,8.841846274778883,2.0809421383647813,416,13,87,6,6,131,70,106,0.271,0.708,0.021,-0.9829,1,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,2,6,8,3,3,4,0,10,2,0,3,1,22,24,5,2,1,3,1,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,6,0,0,7,1,1,0,1,7,0,0,5,2,16,1,8,18,4,4,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,2,2,56,20,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386842966612643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275034774755221,0.18829170261756292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20320317521663087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15712334785691245,0.0,0.08427427441999852,0.11907037345732867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17415828186951024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3291078098939803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539605227978246,0.0,0.18439766187376674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23545045515002244,0.08142742682587208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14169841153959994,0.0,0.0,0.11125472655322527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952040079791804,0.0,0.0,0.12252295691861095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12676142105639712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677422854623468,0.17136637852212727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158543057559741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38184398754354304,0.0,0.0,0.1823119068183676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203896953591985,0.0,0.26463759741543297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315921750092002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752169748384446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133906180507815,0.0,0.0,0.11839887087200884,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rodtej,2020/01/13,"Please someone help I have an extreme case of anxiety and depression. I also have Visual Snow Syndrome/HPPD (look it up)
Lately I feel like my brain is overstimulated and it's trying to interpret random sounds as speech. I have been very sleep deprived lately due to anxiety and I don't know what's going on anymore, I hear random words in my head about things I do in my daily life or people that I talk to throughout the day. I fear that I am becoming schizphrenic.",3.5633241758241745,5.699044164835165,4.666030219780222,81.8695947802198,74.38461538461539,7.187362637362638,25.660714285714285,8.07648339933343,1.7120648351648358,373,13,68,6,8,122,66,91,0.152,0.765,0.083,-0.7334,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,8,4,3,0,0,10,13,6,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,6,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,5,13,1,10,12,0,9,0,2,1,0,3,4,0,3,5,44,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935288439946832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3048757670923061,0.0,0.19761824849869608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22007355334414386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224466681512948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285100336774358,0.0,0.17162744509001027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242295594601694,0.10075483652936876,0.14235561321352816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132474145405075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20450432235525,0.0,0.22458717428308544,0.0,0.1335637459717096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951133849362177,0.0,0.4495612748197918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074741243797942,0.09735126330439216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16733318657232155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13814589915467754,0.0,0.0,0.21873414195824475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19940982767487767,0.0,0.16883736755192547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16016239860622114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323834231016003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528847966433408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644152529889713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatgirlisback,2020/01/13,"Rape dreams - TRIGGER WARNING I've been feeling quite bad lately - which is not exactly related to what I'm about to say. It's 1:53am while I'm writing this. I've had three rape dreams - to clarify I was raped.
What do you do to combat this, I left sleeping next to my boyfriend as it woke him up everytime, now I'm sleeping in a different bed, but still feel awful, do you sleep with your loved ones when you get dreams about awful things that happened to you, or do you move away? 
I just feel like I'm being selfish - sleeping next to him. 

I apologize for any mistakes.",5.139699248120298,5.386060789473689,5.356165413533837,85.66815789473686,68.29824561403508,8.61954887218045,31.19799498746867,8.418075326091056,2.132883709273183,446,17,93,6,7,141,75,114,0.225,0.635,0.14,-0.9074,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,6,0,1,6,8,3,0,1,2,9,8,4,1,1,12,20,5,0,1,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,9,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,6,0,2,4,4,13,2,15,15,0,12,0,0,0,4,12,4,0,1,8,57,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114157919578887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772016887975954,0.0,0.14016512941440154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753892857800506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546416037789299,0.1199269530684333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770557901932154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14844761880225935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18936560592741936,0.0,0.1823921458100612,0.0,0.0,0.08201320707983888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150997638857258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17842012336877305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3570650600711411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375361758687473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17855128921120772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349762027067186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6719682492344969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13406186009180468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11152591886580718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,engineerdontwantthis,2020/01/13,"The Aftermath of Sexual Abuse As a kid, I was not informed about any sexual sensitivities that could occur to me and my well-being. I was a cheerful kid who knew nothing but to play with people my age. I was happy even if my extended family frequently tease me occasionally. In retrospect, I tried to be cheerful I tried to keep my spirits up but my introversion manifested the time I was in high school. I didn't gave any thoughts of everything that occurred to me up until my college graduation. I stopped being cheerful, I stopped being happy the time I was sexually abused as a kid. I don't remember when exactly or how long it happened, I just remember those vivid memories on what happened. I don't even know what to call it - sexual abuse, sexual harassment - I just know that its not rape. 

My memories haunts me quite often, I tried to go about spending hours of watch time on YouTube, I finished the animes my brother sent me but it goes back. I remember my uncle calling me out frequently, right after my aunt called in for lunch. He would hold me back and say that he has something to show. I remember seeing his genitalia and him making me touch his shaft. I remember being shocked and amused by it. I don't remember much but those vivid memories made me question myself, made me built up hate towards men similar to my uncle. I didn't thought of it before because I was surrounded by guys my age. I started working Dec 2018 and that's when I realize that I'm traumatized. One specific married guy tried to seduce me or flirt with me. His subtle touches made me cry and I mentally broke down the moment he keeps on insisting to take a ride with his company car. I live along his house is located so for the first few months, I had to bear and wear a face, and just to reason everything I can to avoid his invitation. I was not comfortable. 

I pondered why other women in my office doesn't have the same sentiment like I have. I could witness other women making sex jokes with other married men, other men joking about cheating with beautiful and sexy women younger than their age. I couldn't bear it. Its not a joke to me. In all honesty, I make sex jokes before. I love sex jokes or any sexualized jokes but that's when I had friends (people within my age), but hearing sex jokes from older men makes me sick. It makes me terrified and horrified by the fact that they had sexually harassed me within the office and on site. Sexualized stares, unnecessary comments, I'm not comfortable. 

I wondered why I'm too sensitive about this and why I can't move forward with life. Why am I having a hard time? Top management are also older men but I don't get terrified of them, I see them like my father. I love those higher bosses. I go back to the time that I was sexually abused as a kid. I hated my uncle, I wanted him to just die. There's a saying that says 'forgive and forget' but the aftermath of it is that I have made myself think of being sexually abused by the people around me. I constantly imagine being forced to do anything sexual in an office setting. Contrary to before I started working, I constantly imagined being raped and murdered. My thoughts also wandered to those stuffs and even ask myself questions that I couldn't even answer: (some of the questions stated below)

1.0. If I get raped, will I like it or will I be disgusted by it. 

2.0. If I get sexually abused, will I report it or will I keep it in.

3.0. If I get raped, will I finally be able to kill myself or will I still put up with it. 

4.0. If I get pregnant, will I abort or will I let it live. 

5.0. If I get raped, will I fight back and have myself get murdered or will I be mentally insane enough to be the murderer. 

​

Going back to forgive and forget, I realized that people who had it similar to mine will always forgive the person and forget the situation but will never forget the trauma it had caused. I thinking back my uncle I'm not entirely sure if I have forgave him but because its been long due, I didn't matter anymore, I just don't want to be involved or to be around him. Even if it doesn't matter anymore, no one can really take away the trauma that it had caused. Its the aftermath of any incident that we have to bear, we can be tough about it, we can pity ourselves about it, but it will still be there even if it doesn't matter anymore. That uncle is fighting for his life with an illness that I don't give a fuck about (on knowing) and my mother, being a pure soul, volunteers every single time and I'm just here conflicted whether I'll be happier if he's dead or I've tormented myself by so much because of it. I just want to forget or erase this trauma but I couldn't help but cry whenever my mother brings him up in our conversation (mentioning that he's will be at my hometown to receive treatment at the nearby hospital). My boyfriend, once, talked about this and I cried franticly at his comment to just forgive him or to let him tell my mother about all of these. Even if I want him dead, I don't want my mother to have a conflicted feelings when she's helping him in his medications. Even if I want to tell the whole family how shitty my mental state is partially because of him, I couldn't I could just cry and mentally torn about everything, about the aftermath of that incident. I definitely blame myself for not going against that aftermath, I made bad decisions and cultivated a wrong perspective in relationships because of it. My mind is mostly about sex, in a bad way, I'm trying so hard to become a better person but its a hard life with a messed up mental state.",4.434407534246574,5.782500768949772,5.6431021689497705,78.98328339041099,70.53424657534245,8.872260273972604,29.029965753424648,9.28854265944574,2.568262328767124,4422,168,830,93,80,1475,389,1095,0.22,0.6759999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.9994,0,1,1,0,9,1,120.0,4,0,4,6,55,61,19,2,41,0,92,23,2,16,7,185,158,77,7,26,55,7,6,3,1,15,6,4,0,16,66,39,1,9,33,10,1,12,27,32,0,3,29,16,162,29,122,87,11,105,2,2,6,14,95,40,1,31,53,609,228,8,0.043632881962537486,0.3101869813436891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978639988263034,0.03630605315012817,0.04727620937678383,0.05301872744140634,0.1186874238792103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981628320510996,0.0,0.0,0.03590614409268367,0.07768503130966083,0.04079085462886629,0.0,0.04099452891044697,0.20130595759273195,0.07286326778404331,0.13299099929297198,0.04818909006618848,0.11138510650953187,0.0,0.0,0.03858973830732199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336621527972351,0.0,0.0,0.08964597801204975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430328907240802,0.0,0.10451191742150184,0.0,0.19171468797421115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045284042733462884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04508443087185522,0.0,0.2305528561979642,0.0,0.03676258492420585,0.0,0.11764326253037495,0.0,0.08226639577446064,0.0,0.022062096141671848,0.0,0.0,0.047797689431538816,0.0,0.037114107107466314,0.0,0.0,0.033710656368212966,0.04033789628347294,0.15957465961244824,0.0418566362497502,0.09919028935787788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640682618968415,0.07716882683933265,0.09289602839852887,0.1172594756009882,0.08615687518910331,0.0,0.0,0.0491774291130487,0.0,0.05849240207562181,0.046100535404874465,0.0,0.0,0.042969599558342265,0.050346487521897056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11634873089438727,0.04827331914225468,0.0,0.07193847248450068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923515604978548,0.09245758472328383,0.06395046643469053,0.0,0.07705726832875086,0.07722745498024755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787607590252784,0.2064324395595132,0.14562643762437452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043955538165258996,0.21985841227437813,0.0,0.0440567724456992,0.0,0.03482735010052174,0.04637484829998385,0.06415037741241841,0.0,0.03365236845135844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0418669270283888,0.0,0.0,0.04646759526688536,0.0591335400913524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12099818584251515,0.0761970990619482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043863097855214285,0.14663644095656228,0.046408940844760736,0.0,0.0,0.027952341468998356,0.04486186970371743,0.0,0.04684538607753373,0.29656529724932645,0.03726224278999035,0.0,0.1040958570967694,0.0,0.044158805994480216,0.0695395155117419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04904518747198194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03359072424450344,0.0,0.0,0.061767156860590026,0.0,0.06969055179634757,0.07295808614360769,0.0,0.0,0.04994921077155677,0.0,0.0,0.041123474875744144,0.0,0.0656129941133362,0.03507045773729427,0.07627412406475842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05591637788607863,0.0,0.1039189033141325,0.152656106152185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811931357484456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441482562296904,0.034633750758380766,0.0,0.0,0.039231200982787165,0.0,0.15748755724217686,0.048714554491126216,0.0,0.0,0.04731799923424072,0.06353051546768672,0.0,0.0,0.03099554745764485,0.04770570682147228,0.05301872744140634,0.0
mentalhealth,yydennek,2020/01/13,having a panic attack right now hi i’m currently having a panic attack rn for no apparent reason. i cant stop shaking and it’s hard for me fro breathe properly . my dad came home from the supermarket and started yelling at me and my sister and i think that’s what’s triggered it. i don’t think it’s necessarily the reason just the catalyst. i haven’t gotten a panic attack in a while now as i used to get them quite frequently. i don’t know what to do or how to calm down but i cant focus on homework or anything and i’m too scared to leave my room or see anyone . what do i do,0.9604133333333316,2.8085135680000017,3.6709,87.29728333333338,81.32000000000002,6.406666666666666,21.61666666666667,7.492282038375204,0.8130666666666664,456,14,99,7,12,161,74,125,0.18,0.7809999999999999,0.038,-0.9216,2,0,0,0,1,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,5,9,3,5,7,0,10,1,1,5,0,20,21,12,0,0,5,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,7,6,0,1,5,0,0,2,6,8,0,0,2,3,14,1,12,19,0,15,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,3,7,66,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087619592853094,0.0,0.12800178658826394,0.0,0.0,0.5308709194166986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17790413390830973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126679804788016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933940602278702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15602615171990436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548446916380764,0.0,0.0,0.16470163242599592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5475020672011983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16544319898189425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198560924249079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328361418339068,0.0,0.0,0.15572951091292506,0.0,0.12395068377446558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009684596353077,0.0,0.0,0.13004411373630534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19933625427690996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13434251813074388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,toxicwaste789,2020/01/13,"Dont fit an ED diagnosis so no one really cares I dont binge, but I eat until I get nauseous fairly often. I dont vomit or starve. All I eat is junk. I hate it and feel like shit, but I cant seem to actually stop. I've tried but always fail. I always hate myself whenever I eat too much :/",-1.4259615384615358,0.4587187692307708,2.646442307692311,90.56043269230771,92.07692307692308,5.711538461538463,14.278846153846152,7.1686216300943375,-0.19388461538461546,220,4,53,4,8,83,45,65,0.371,0.521,0.10800000000000001,-0.9707,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,3,0,1,0,5,5,1,0,1,10,11,7,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,2,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,0,1,10,2,2,11,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,3,31,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.16224720652552949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766857159408688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951464451198944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5845715968729115,0.0,0.0,0.5103809583440009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406679240061113,0.11877722395584478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686475337541973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3282975513250051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122695370323023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222130720761967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266307169660048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651135197198026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15135819356950345,0.0,0.0,0.17066500478110544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900202959853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288062117812785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plutoplanet16,2020/01/13,Idk what’s going on anymore For most of the past 3 years I’ve been depressed and have really bad anxiety but I’ve always kept it to my self and managed it. now that I think about it mostly in unhealthy ways but this past 8 months I’ve been feel really motivated for a couple days to a week then out of nowhere I’m crying and feel so shitty and feel like I’m having a mild panic attack for no reason I feel like I’m going crazy I’m not sure if I’m bipolar or it’s something else I’m finally going to a doctor at the end of the month but does anyone have any idea what’s happening I feel so lost rn,4.891428571428573,3.641438593984965,6.547819548872184,81.959022556391,69.07518796992481,9.40451127819549,27.27067669172932,8.418075326091056,1.6166872180451128,475,11,107,6,7,166,81,133,0.262,0.642,0.095,-0.9748,0,0,1,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,2,4,8,1,1,7,0,5,2,0,2,1,24,23,12,0,1,6,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,8,5,0,1,9,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,4,5,4,3,14,19,2,19,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,4,13,55,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577307003597551,0.0,0.0,0.10279058435670756,0.0,0.1156331624302667,0.0,0.14990514494329066,0.1056910915887905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17196063566891606,0.0,0.0,0.12620811251718458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167250134163318,0.16603667147320125,0.0974824712365077,0.0,0.13018958131609187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15471354903740145,0.1322767604421854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12627060798041545,0.0,0.13387846616173826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3821425523304401,0.21597032657038007,0.0,0.16558291576261622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25771461218966896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13366586864349356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063559806148482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14769339721330085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650035398680445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413009602143931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17734782611451178,0.0,0.0,0.2885891049837994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19366752903227225,0.1554125163883462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576876322620381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11636650493219908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246180008281592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685402159996306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997980451716952,0.12124742468695338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733886516487747
mentalhealth,Grugisor,2020/01/13,"Top 10 good albums to boost your mood and be happy Hey guys! I have a small youtube channel where I post music-related content, and recently put together a list for people out there like myself (who deal with anxiety) of 10 albums that boost your mood! On the list are synth-pop, rock, and video game-inspired albums that have really helped me through the years personally. No rap or explicit lyrics.

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[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enorhp3S-os&t=33s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=enorhp3S-os&t=33s)",12.267965367965367,15.95101244155844,6.8851298701298695,68.55721861471862,54.45454545454545,9.28917748917749,31.01515151515152,9.725611199111238,3.218655411255411,446,14,57,8,6,114,62,77,0.027000000000000003,0.764,0.209,0.9329999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,2,0,1,2,5,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,7,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,7,3,0,9,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,3,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6791841203239124,0.3808414235476777,0.0,0.0,0.11988329335162658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156190013352656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314415404056644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551682786364666,0.0,0.16682150536487295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050399111230161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656095575046712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864350100131244,0.13683378061566134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500855778170719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15753758562813772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003929180336221,0.0,0.15473295801201115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3808414235476777,0.10091658380538264
mentalhealth,Zacharius191,2020/01/13,Why am I so anxious all the time? I am always really really anxious and overthink everything and when I'm with someone I feel like I did everything wrong and they are losing interest and that they dislike me then over text if I'm talking to people (especially my girlfriend) I always feel like I fuck up and that I'm doing shit wrong but then occasionally I get moments of clarity where I read through the messages or think of what actually happened on whatever day and it wasn't as bad as I thought it was but those moments are so short and I don't know why I constantly feel like this but it is rly damaging and I have suffered with depression for a while and I really don't want anxiety as well it would be so bad so I'm hoping someone can diagnose me with not anxiety so I can be stupid and believe them. I also really hope this is anonymous and no one knows who I am that would be shit lmao,3.0981967213114743,4.779327781420768,4.965814207650272,81.1897049180328,74.46448087431693,8.814426229508197,29.139890710382513,9.3871,2.7099766120218582,716,31,143,18,15,245,101,183,0.204,0.607,0.188,-0.3633,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,3,1,9,19,4,0,3,0,21,4,2,0,1,33,38,29,0,6,6,0,3,3,1,2,1,0,0,0,12,14,0,0,7,1,0,0,5,12,1,1,4,3,22,7,14,29,1,14,0,4,0,1,7,5,3,4,12,104,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.117784519667561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652270634380676,0.20086197382906906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846683494264486,0.2727103497216885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20155674490725106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598610209502587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043241510810086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784067599168754,0.0,0.1039576129756968,0.12250663925520415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169524167391635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830866670978495,0.258681525013822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158400272961153,0.06306008880809341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673346131103266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23976208514777375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266569734927675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17690186347501985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13503097115414772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178856245496009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367728081583801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073136223332652,0.0,0.3092907101408421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477909609992764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20453523272566806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701304263331922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773388530083875,0.0,0.0958212851886158,0.07038038228316648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119122013173071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10852262613761593,0.0,0.217823605545722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714817861503943,0.2639301605010177,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,constantthought,2020/01/14,"Can anyone relate/ advice At work I have to stand the whole entire shift and the intense anxiety I feel makes me always feel like I need to sit/lay down because my legs feel very weak and unable to support me which also causes a lot of lower back pain and leg pain. The problem is I can't sit down unless I'm on my lunch break and this problem is frustrating beyond belief it literally feels like I'm about to collapse and gets worse as the shift goes on. Does anyone feel a similar way at work? If so do you have any suggestions or recommendations that aren't breathing. Other things I have already tried and not willing to try again because of dependence and addiction: kratom, benzodiazepines, other opiates. Thanks in advance",7.263695652173915,7.537269536231888,7.127355072463767,74.68711956521742,63.78260869565217,9.508695652173913,33.19202898550725,9.188382445141503,2.92188115942029,588,22,102,9,8,187,95,138,0.187,0.7340000000000001,0.079,-0.9468,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,3,6,10,1,0,6,0,10,8,3,3,0,24,22,13,0,4,4,0,5,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,7,7,1,0,6,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,0,5,10,4,18,21,2,15,1,0,0,0,2,8,0,4,4,67,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16962953556333782,0.0,0.15205282118776411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17171106889362273,0.124435147694395,0.12947362504828705,0.0,0.0,0.10581493775804256,0.0,0.1190353762642644,0.0,0.0,0.2176015701834592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964860682951868,0.0,0.1897075036612123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598464820208382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361686701230626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3933861320334675,0.2223247081106572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812958086411991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520389025045899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228755848563414,0.0,0.0,0.10386578075083036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153771751756757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3311437546493621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977808798359301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765757093602989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325774336032496,0.0,0.0,0.10337529105932004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21128757112648452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838823951003564,0.0,0.1235099073194242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17372447334050578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265607364362777,0.0,0.15857209401423808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hrishikesh5720,2020/01/14,"30 Year Old Male/Undiagnosed Autism? What should I do? I'm a 30 year old male and I'm pretty sure I have undiagnosed autism. I've never posted on Reddit before, so forgive me if I'm breaking some sort of community norms or protocols. 

It started in elementary school. I didn't talk to the other children at all. I still have old report cards from 2nd and 3rd grade which say things like: ""\_\_\_\_ is still very quiet but very well behaved"" etc. I was talkative at home but at school I was basically a mute. I had a great deal of trouble with learning to read, despite having an IQ around 126. As I got older I started to get comfortable in my school. I went to a very small elementary school and I spent years around the same kids, so I knew them practically like I was related to them. 

Once I went to sixth grade it all started again. Add to that mix the fun of puberty and you can imagine how things went for me. I couldn't stand sitting still for hours at a time, I felt like I was going to explode. I felt angry and nervous all the time. I didn't talk to anyone, I stopped doing my schoolwork, and I spent all my time learning to play the guitar. It became an obsession. I could play entire albums from my favorite bands. After a while, my parents realized I was never going to start improving my grades again—they let me drop out. This was probably the only period of my life when I was genuinely happy. I could stay home and focus on my music without any need to interact with people. However, it didn't last long.

My parents' marriage was falling apart and they had no interest in supporting a lazy kid with no job and no future. I got a job at the local Walmart and began paying rent, but my father would scream at me incessantly, complaining about bills. I later found out he was addicted to heroine, and everyone knew except for me. I'm assuming that's where my rent money went. I finally had no choice but to move out. I've been at Walmart for the past 12 years. I despise working there, but the thought of a rapid disruption to my life and routine is even worse. I can't imagine enjoying any job where I have to deal with people, so it's better to avoid the anxiety of starting again somewhere new. Also, I had found the rare job there that didn't involve direct interaction with customers, and I'm not sure if I'd be lucky enough to find another job like that.

In my twelve years at Walmart, my interests have turned much more intellectual. I spend all my free time learning about math, finance, economics, and accounting. My goal is to free myself from needing to be around people. However, I realizing more and more lately how futile this is. Even if I were a millionaire, I'd still need to go to doctors appointments, car servicing, jury duty, etc. If I have any one of these events upcoming I am filled with dread and anxiety. I just don't understand how ""normal people"" are supposed to act in these situations. 

I suppose most of these details are unnecessary, but writing this all out has been therapeutic. I'll list here some of the reasons I believe myself to be autistic.

Quiet, monotone voice.

Total lack of social understanding.

Unable to make eye contact.

Spending time around people is exhausting.

Great interest in intellectual ideas, but no interest at all in day to day life.

Greatly disturbed by unexpected events.

No interest in team activities. 

Difficulty focusing, unless it's something I'm particularly interested in.

No sense of direction, need GPS to navigate the town I grew up in.

If a business doesn't have a website and requires calling, I'll often just find another company.

It may sound, from this post, like I'm just a coward with no will to improve but I've actually tried a lot. I thought about ""forcing myself"" to be more normal. I walked around malls asking pre-scripted questions to strangers, ""do you have the time"", ""do you know where x is"" in order to combat my social anxiety. I've done CBT, positive affirmations, meditation, antidepressants. I even became a manager at my work for a year. My thinking was, I'll force myself into the situation and I'll have to adapt. I started out pretty good actually, but after a few months I was psychologically exhausted and broken. It actually got worse over time, not better. I've tried fasting, keto diet, vegan diet, carnivore diet. 

To deal with the constant, gnawing misery I've abused a lot of exotic drugs. Nothing too serious, but I've used coffee obsessively, Kratom, modafinil, phenibut, and alcohol. I've quit everything except coffee and Kratom and I take an antidepressant now, but it doesn't seem to do much at all. What should I do? I don't think it would be wise to just call my doctor and say, ""hey, I think I'm autistic"". Even if that were the correct choice, I don't know if I'd have the nerve to do it. Any suggestions?",4.409905887273869,6.26092028353326,5.612857889783541,77.19485517097145,71.35550708833152,8.732400173286925,29.464588219476852,9.293530613975678,2.757847743535353,3808,155,688,85,73,1267,404,917,0.126,0.7240000000000001,0.15,0.9881,11,2,3,0,1,0,138.0,0,3,3,8,40,45,1,6,39,0,73,14,1,6,14,150,127,53,0,21,29,3,2,5,0,6,10,7,4,4,29,43,4,4,30,7,13,14,24,13,1,1,42,10,86,34,113,70,26,121,0,0,1,0,39,44,0,20,60,454,115,30,0.0,0.05995725348608929,0.1481460898073951,0.05516563466175599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054080095404334685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04046785764043725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376493351521799,0.10612503780034094,0.1161353544418652,0.0,0.0,0.03538336847619015,0.0,0.0,0.2252406481147866,0.04730774193622192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043060124810121614,0.05701317782220028,0.0,0.08950993539307785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334431886270097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054684753528274,0.0,0.08080606733414354,0.0,0.0,0.0652705568251844,0.1565109533759214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359031081158948,0.0,0.05178527849912085,0.0,0.0,0.0586843671007826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052287274695093616,0.11287327461334093,0.1336933869479865,0.0,0.0,0.0483541198665003,0.045479451664342065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717520844458097,0.055434012779294564,0.09250195187275544,0.0,0.0,0.11096895632959926,0.0,0.0,0.026438408052811443,0.0,0.0862779534937894,0.042444084455324334,0.12141749601044782,0.16737267501324346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05386870878733155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151951756854782,0.0,0.04983457065325403,0.0,0.0,0.05712555477102239,0.0,0.0,0.251082421895583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055621073604970886,0.04124886839161165,0.05708331461530019,0.0,0.0,0.05174583583073942,0.10722892662906318,0.1236123550372336,0.0,0.0,0.04478278947373809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604311858166093,0.0,0.0,0.033778443687472716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04039148740247238,0.053783853652199176,0.07439926246581506,0.15008836929038644,0.07805757328324793,0.04887348597951807,0.0,0.0,0.09916200140306604,0.048555731365334726,0.0,0.159300594042154,0.0538914181936991,0.0342904589750524,0.03848648642221124,0.0,0.0,0.11237911007218122,0.0,0.04830707340777761,0.17541159049833754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692894530501757,0.10296455740351604,0.054559478246907565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056687861125861175,0.053823392939250855,0.05061751544959458,0.0,0.0,0.05202915638884379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048437963148851,0.0,0.20485507520798132,0.0,0.04606781839847268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376163079928253,0.0,0.1031684463268985,0.0,0.03895729394414818,0.0,0.0,0.2149058711920505,0.05393694049242942,0.16164910834897847,0.04230706052674789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05742461677066555,0.095387005476746,0.0,0.03804777592205632,0.0813468695037835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723786067906541,0.0972746562597478,0.0,0.0803475632795588,0.20655246616675876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871334593132382,0.05504242636141548,0.0,0.1053607253025837,0.0,0.04370545411534735,0.0,0.12526035679144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04549891265647486,0.1876409974290773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048780277967166434,0.0,0.07368036924368827,0.0,0.103139234295348,0.07189500556629724,0.0,0.0,0.1955232109769412
mentalhealth,concod,2020/01/14,"Help for Mental Health and Anxiety My girlfriend has recently started a dedicated page to help others struggling with mental health and anxiety, please fell free to contact her for any help;

instagram;  [https://www.instagram.com/iamnotanxiety/?hl=en](https://www.instagram.com/iamnotanxiety/?hl=en)",23.08764705882353,27.422334235294123,15.334117647058823,15.403529411764708,30.176470588235297,13.858823529411767,46.41176470588235,13.023866798666859,7.177105882352942,260,10,21,6,2,70,26,34,0.131,0.508,0.361,0.897,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,5,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,12,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155186265882233,0.0,0.3491502417660072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4851394874262277,0.0,0.0,0.4588801659307691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4599510870958741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504990123537064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22532351334644965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16152367477639945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385679394229578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,icantwait4christmas,2020/01/14,"Help? I can’t get out of the bloody cycle I’ve gotten myself into. I starve myself all week and then eat a shit ton of food once, twice, maybe 3 times a week. Then I’ll eat like one small soup or something once a day for a week. My stomach always feels like shit and I’m dizzy / weak a lot. Sounds like an eating disorder I know but like???? Not anorexia obviously and idk about bulimia bc I can never make myself puke. Do you think I’ll be ok doing this? Thank u",-0.820204081632653,1.3319004489795925,1.3481632653061233,97.86469387755103,95.53061224489795,4.0244897959183685,13.122448979591837,5.773587663045528,-1.0542938775510209,356,6,82,3,14,118,72,98,0.153,0.669,0.17800000000000002,0.6623,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,1,9,2,0,7,1,5,8,3,1,3,16,13,7,0,0,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,4,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,1,2,9,6,6,11,3,11,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,2,12,42,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344282653693626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034270412249962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838008607880751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4923035326233396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810891907280738,0.11457019701202037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19392314985011566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378804939339281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749435406308244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813657110552191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3133997505085623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634302517914118,0.0,0.0,0.10704993668546303,0.0,0.16111580345359214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236892136758148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34158310897342226,0.10867260481737943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292402797374266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346264051545652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476495169589576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276026815654334,0.0,0.0,0.09351453603267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3859236096230321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jones197299,2020/01/14,Cutting myself after 412 days self harm free I cut myself for the first time in over 400 days and I think I've broken my boyfriend. He has extremely bad experiences in the past with people he cared for cutting themselves so badly they had to call an ambulance and me doing this today has triggered him and I'm so worried about him. It's a bit mad that I'm more worried about him than about myself right now,4.185894308943091,5.481971573170731,4.705853658536586,85.66577235772358,71.07317073170732,6.930081300813008,25.861788617886177,7.1686216300943375,1.1475056910569106,327,10,64,3,6,104,60,82,0.287,0.65,0.063,-0.9624,0,0,0,0,0,2,2.0,0,0,1,1,6,9,4,0,4,0,4,0,0,1,0,6,8,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,7,0,1,1,0,11,3,12,7,2,12,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,8,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3893996144970378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545777202705318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23810804517831302,0.0,0.2377477368639589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007701800036512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22809975950449424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19834711562599053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22260155069951507,0.16166117837853358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19913878994176631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432629012078267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941558795746232,0.0,0.0,0.13597209928067874,0.0,0.2210321965768885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4736215492385251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bnerna,2020/01/14,Need someone to talk to. Please help Please help. I need someone to talk to.,-0.4039999999999999,1.4091539333333358,-0.2666666666666657,105.88000000000004,109.66666666666666,2.0,18.333333333333336,3.1291,-1.1436666666666664,59,2,13,0,3,17,7,15,0.0,0.5,0.5,0.8402,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3548502624494929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925484825926183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5811297602942955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4485647190501255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255171848204671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IfIEverGetThisRight,2020/01/14,"My compulsive lying is slowly deteriorating my relationships For context, I am sophomore at a big university. I've had a pretty bad problem with lying for my whole life; when I was younger I would tell my parents completely made up stories about what I did in school that day and things like that. The issues came later in life, and it didn't seriously start affecting me until about high school. I started to lie about more fundamental parts of my life: my past, my interests, and my personality. A lot of these lies has an ""intent"" behind them, whether to boost others opinions of me or to help myself relate to other people. 

The worrying part is that recently, I have begun to lie for absolutely no reason. In fact, I can think of multiple times that I've lied recently where it would have been much easier for me or much more beneficial for me to tell the truth. As an example, I recently caught up with an old friend and we were talking about what classes we were taking this semester. She mentioned that she was taking an online math course that I was also currently taking, but instead of saying ""Cool, I'm taking that class too"" I said ""Cool, I took that class last semester"". What the fuck, right? Then instead of fixing my mistake, I doubled down on my assertion, telling her that the class was easy and that the exams weren't too hard despite the fact that I was in her exact position and knew absolutely nothing about the class. 

I put myself in terrible positions quite a lot these days due to the frequency and size of my lies, and the despite the fact that I am fully aware of their negative impact I just continue to lie. I seriously need help with this, but I'm terrified of bringing it up with my friends and I can't seem to fix this on my own. Any advice would be greatly appreciated",8.91146137026239,7.315553431486879,9.042928206997086,68.41179755830906,61.332361516034965,12.423396501457725,37.47248542274053,11.333407214811013,4.162498688046647,1429,55,261,33,16,473,180,343,0.115,0.7809999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.8474,2,0,0,1,0,0,37.0,2,0,2,1,13,15,1,0,19,2,25,4,0,4,5,43,44,19,0,6,6,1,1,1,2,3,3,2,0,1,26,16,0,0,4,0,0,5,5,7,0,0,18,5,45,8,47,22,11,40,0,0,0,1,22,16,1,6,20,198,71,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407147765223727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516875643128277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07242428548274238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892382924357006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218086934476128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11166420039760397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13736858041191494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645647109575349,0.09845839502526188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174176529441565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09540391569624644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427706588629809,0.11252408142139267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115930266026074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681247365071171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22567427254495745,0.05203097555400834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18108656687936,0.0,0.10077375645643932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565808775922544,0.07896909122814655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219051610640953,0.0,0.11175481220909914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825668087922166,0.2306602607177235,0.10166718993456098,0.07383433617424086,0.092992505440772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834973509682608,0.0,0.10190700816671992,0.0,0.10706285189765434,0.0,0.11327685009368214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950069527225602,0.3154704644216735,0.11434214355453284,0.0,0.09095121357747264,0.1013067743106872,0.08469381535171226,0.0,0.2155692569535312,0.0,0.09695444812921146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15076381492554358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32030178509075397,0.08560141454451631,0.2792595250108783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075448656088003,0.0682414965768184,0.0,0.0,0.06210154960703902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832645355793688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189044866361088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815686560183306,0.0,0.22696561819903874,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway1209834,2020/01/14,"Best friend is trying to kill himself, I have no idea what to do One of my best friends has been really going through it ever since he went to college. Here is some information to take into account.

\-Has been dating an amazing girl who is super wholesome, wonderful, smart, and comes from a loving family for about 4 years.

\-He is near genius

\-He comes from a family who couldn't provide the most amazing upbringing, his mom got deported to the UK when he was in elementary school, and his father was never there for emotional support.

Once he got to college, he started gaining random obsessions, it started with running, he was running 80+ miles a week and basically destroying himself over this new obsession. He said he would hate himself if he didn't run. He was training for a marathon with his girlfriend, working 20+ hour weeks, and getting straight A's in university (studying computer engineering) - he would set the curve on plenty of exams.

He then stopped running and gained a new addiction that was binging and purging. He (out of nowhere) started caring about his physique which was so unlike him, he always made it seem like he didn't care about what others thought of him. This became very extreme and he then became vegan (another obsession). A little bit down the road, he started cutting himself and burning himself.  (I only learned of all of these issues once he returned to my home town during a break.) I asked him how his semester was and he started laughing really loud and said its been horrible i've been cutting myself nonstop and binging and purging and he showed me.  I was extremely surprised because all of these issues seemed nothing like him.  Of course I asked why and told him to stop, and everything that a good friend would do.

He went back to school started seeing a therapist and continued to have a hard time. He started drinking a lot. (he has addiction in his genes). This continued for a long time never getting better. He broke up with his girlfriend in the beginning of his third year in college because he needed a change in his life so he wouldn't kill himself. He attempted to kill himself about 5 weeks ago and lived. He went on a 5150 hold. I helped him through this time and offered for him to stay at my place closer to our hometown....

He dropped the semester at his school and lived with me for about a week and I would look after him and try to help him obtain a new appreciation of life by having fun with me. He would break down quite a bit but he didn't want to kill himself during this period of time which was good. I finished my quarter in college and we went back to our hometown together. He started buying xanax and adderall and taking those a lot. I would always tell him not to. (a lot of the time he would take them and not tell me because he cares of my opinion a ton, in his suicide note I was one of the 4 people he addressed).

New years eve I take him to a couple of parties and stuff and monitor his drinking, I also made sure he never binged (I had to take plates away from him) because he would hate himself the next day if I didn't. We go to some parties and then he goes into a girls car to hook up with her. Me and my other friends are ready to leave around 1am and we look for him and find him extremely intoxicated. Apparently he snuck more alcohol into his system when he was with this girl and took  a decent amount of xanax earlier that day. He could barely speak so I took him to the hospital. I waited in the room with him for several hours and he looked really bad.

The doctor asked for all of his information so I gave it to them. They asked who his emergency contact is and he just looked at me. So I am now his emergency contact even though his father is in town. He is so scared about his father knowing of all of his issues. He tells me I wouldn't understand. He says his father uses people's vulnerability against them which I wasn't surprised to hear, however I believe that if his father knew of the severity of this situation, all he would want to do is help and support. 

That morning once he got released, I drove him to my place and he said he was done with substances for at least 2 weeks. I was so glad. That night he did xanax and drank alcohol, and he did the next day. He is not pleasant to be around anymore and just uses me. He says that he appreciates my relationship with him and he will try to buy me things, I appreciate the gesture, but he can't buy me. About 10 days later (now) he is on his fourth day of aggressively binging and purging and cutting all over his body. He has panic attacks. He contacts every person in his contact list every night talking about his struggles, and they all come to me and ask wtf is going on with him.

THE FINAL STRAW

My girlfriend and I (2 years 7 months) broke up (on good terms) this Christmas Eve (\~2 weeks ago) he hit her up and they have hung out 3 times since her and I broke up. He tried to make a move on her and she deflected and left. She drove home and cried the whole way home apparently because she felt violated. I haven't brought this up to him yet because I care about his safety and don't want him to kill himself because of this but I am still infuriated. My whole family is worried about me because of this situation between my him and I, I have extended myself to him so many times. His insurance sucks and he can't get in-patient care. He gets mad at me when I say he should tell his dad. At this point in my life, I don't even care if I am friends with him, I know I could have been considered an enabler in the past, I just want him to be safe and better. He said if I told his father that he would never speak to me ever again and hate me forever. Im okay with that, its better than the current situation. But what if he kills himself because I tell his dad? What do I do? He is really harming me mentally. I can take a lot but I also have stuff going on in my life, I can't bear this weight anymore. Please help.",4.430862638370741,5.5166198688663295,5.178189101584003,83.30224909791454,70.27749576988154,8.065251870425866,29.469390251360768,8.375421602937221,2.0404800195706683,4703,180,935,70,83,1524,418,1182,0.134,0.7709999999999999,0.095,-0.995,5,0,4,0,0,2,130.0,5,0,6,13,43,66,18,6,47,1,86,19,1,6,14,167,177,84,7,27,17,9,3,2,8,14,13,11,5,4,46,81,6,5,14,4,4,22,22,29,0,4,52,19,158,37,149,105,25,167,0,3,5,1,215,58,1,18,82,619,204,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096978807208306,0.0,0.0,0.06583955358287574,0.07937647940888619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05939701187103375,0.06180204376713477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038941461801909265,0.0,0.0,0.07365999991933067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611974159237337,0.17359076271990248,0.04224878477083697,0.03489150499863095,0.05711223759431184,0.03100790690456813,0.20374574929578124,0.0,0.0,0.04184076693655679,0.07794613932148771,0.09853417635220033,0.0810881362614794,0.041250919030879116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271823417484809,0.0,0.0392861017782885,0.09597090684930176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05930186598143099,0.04109146778664133,0.040793333717627465,0.11975170742361332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03801137050341253,0.0,0.03800412205023062,0.0,0.07276039170017608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04177421152988204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490573763638854,0.06718522202551876,0.062579175794292,0.0,0.0333764089317114,0.0,0.10502858926569317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035657416441693485,0.0406818510676566,0.03394261429835159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346006240833867,0.0,0.07761035688703723,0.0,0.08442342353796575,0.09344645115567893,0.0891057356675756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033267525267467984,0.10999552091063086,0.0,0.0,0.0418561832352338,0.0,0.0995687958196487,0.0,0.11175454437947424,0.0,0.07314507753238249,0.0,0.0,0.0419232380056028,0.0401144143960265,0.11628437521594848,0.0,0.0,0.24652003097758565,0.0,0.040819131056407484,0.0,0.0,0.03932280088397243,0.040349541294838594,0.0,0.1049240590642718,0.03628659853847243,0.03722110600532224,0.06558543626508873,0.032865143265351345,0.12474316115092865,0.0,0.0,0.12629045454357926,0.03351766065210415,0.07027999772852425,0.02478928633332248,0.037651165758133806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037425437465669315,0.0,0.0,0.04349449409588061,0.02964245943101325,0.039470834139950034,0.0,0.027536670991007456,0.1145696085056967,0.14346887609901507,0.07899140241097917,0.06970125942153885,0.0,0.035634025625211604,0.0,0.0,0.11864932045473868,0.05033008707555532,0.028244419450193563,0.0,0.04357235657999041,0.0,0.0,0.03545154080246565,0.05149234444640144,0.0324266619651729,0.07760067954487569,0.040765356948059085,0.03510654020027189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03949985118754429,0.0,0.0,0.09516384629954383,0.0,0.0,0.03987132102573157,0.0,0.0,0.14130345277972953,0.08859867925700482,0.03718069128512668,0.112754109465861,0.02959344109528227,0.06761639770009686,0.0,0.08390864954654388,0.0,0.061440345391133064,0.12523088685144193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21028650599307505,0.03958318133840128,0.029657716541535182,0.06209651617002763,0.0,0.038823734734760584,0.08502613317599612,0.040621933108904,0.0842854265803415,0.03500125424840396,0.0,0.16753475448504565,0.02984937463528805,0.16229720476148166,0.0,0.0,0.04311900710484967,0.024672222856607647,0.0,0.036486988216181605,0.02948268977028693,0.15158449199246646,0.0,0.0,0.07097213440955642,0.08252131487100832,0.10085454634749456,0.0,0.0,0.038661005402994886,0.0,0.06414901920392735,0.0,0.030641976674497924,0.0876176374959073,0.02947768201818337,0.17873473180734425,0.045222953287459004,0.0,0.13770576454547268,0.033510434421270184,0.08292443731924705,0.0,0.0,0.04027357432045008,0.027036233333096057,0.0377145029425735,0.0,0.2638111298744832,0.0,0.0,0.09566023638354818
mentalhealth,VastNefariousness4,2020/01/14,"Should I talk to my friend about this? What should I say? My friend is a 24 year old male. He lives in a yurt outside his parents house. He tells me that his cat sometimes brings mice into the yurt from outside. My friend says hes killed a couple, because he doesnt want them loving in the yurt. He told me that one time he caught one. So he took it outside, and threw it outside as hard as he could. This is what concerns me. One time he said he caught one, and he got really mad so, he threw it into a bowl of water, and let it drown. I showed some concern to him about it, and he said ""well, I dont want it coming back, so I had to kill it"" there are more humane ways to kill a mouse. That's something her told me almost a year ago, but should I bring it up to him? A couple days ago, he said that there was a rat chewing his cables in his car. He never caught the rat, but he said that if he did he would throw it against the ground, so that it would suffer. Not sure if hed actually do that though. Should I be concerned?",1.1013827751196177,2.5441285545454555,2.2812440191387573,99.33055023923448,79.36363636363636,4.9952153110047846,17.942583732057415,4.9825596385082,-0.8212727272727278,782,14,194,2,19,249,111,220,0.12300000000000001,0.848,0.028999999999999998,-0.9562,2,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,1,0,11,11,4,0,12,0,20,3,0,0,2,25,39,15,4,11,5,1,1,0,3,6,0,6,0,2,21,7,2,0,0,1,0,11,4,5,1,4,16,7,24,6,18,13,2,29,0,1,0,1,44,7,0,4,10,118,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.10828779490019352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19673111858579714,0.0,0.11111743169590467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532678136041537,0.0,0.06764445953973662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558825371028998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859812828216307,0.2455657726118229,0.0,0.07156454159231722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005250966974674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571985107504248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875045519168417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940464511521957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804103120694404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3683056674053734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134712863092756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979859031328873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015205926582466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558459926710706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644121068293405,0.0,0.3007764721986164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12321573291320685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108830829126955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4222201520610213,0.1764908410110913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542782591106672,0.10974921063729616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458509399713392,0.0,0.0,0.0891910795490884,0.09699005809899312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902452424074714,0.0,0.12941151219510785,0.0,0.0,0.2120674675176576,0.12328843148449513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090243549963815,0.08808044771223912,0.0,0.0,0.09977266889052024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576555606813493,0.0,0.0,0.14291823291471967
mentalhealth,ospreyrunaway,2020/01/14,"I wish I could carry a stuffed animal around with me wherever I go I find hugging a stuffed animal extremely comforting and it helps a lot with anxiety. I’ve lately been having the huge urge to hold my big stuffed seal while I’m in school. Mostly during stressful moments. I feel like having it with me would help a lot.

But unfortunately I can’t do that. I’m in high school. I would be teased relentlessly. Even if nobody said anything directly to me, I know they’d talk about it.

Honestly even if nobody cared, it would still stress me out that they would. I bet it’d be stressful enough to defeat the purpose of having it. I just want to have a comfort item with me. 

To the freshman who carries their stuffed dog/wolf around with them, whom I have never spoken to but have seen every day with your plushie, I commend you and I wish I could be that brave.",2.66708823529412,4.8647401058823565,3.5466911764705884,88.55886029411766,77.35294117647058,6.602941176470589,24.15441176470589,7.645422480735847,1.1592647058823529,678,23,137,10,16,216,99,170,0.077,0.735,0.18899999999999997,0.9497,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,4,1,7,12,1,3,8,0,20,1,0,0,1,34,31,7,0,11,5,0,1,1,0,4,0,1,0,0,11,11,0,1,3,0,1,1,2,5,0,0,3,3,26,7,19,17,5,15,0,1,1,1,13,8,0,6,7,99,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419590942306386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208452572178453,0.2425013910585719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13886935170232914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21749608583656024,0.0,0.0,0.08784049947108377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073544178580116,0.0,0.17992329860070605,0.0,0.11475798918703847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688689817565671,0.0973043723463308,0.0,0.0,0.12448825396595713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740803711884564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18258972971452767,0.14390731104509116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074854316007511,0.0,0.1536443723225068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654253639262936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315920341389375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504914555984944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12956147073182192,0.0,0.0,0.27569202716702385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877292233357234,0.0,0.4680646637359365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094758493750789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033681946691852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132564243708776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870224803097231,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AphroditeFlower,2020/01/14,"Boyfriend won’t let me help him, he can’t talk about his problems. So my boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 4 months, I know it sounds like a short period of time but in this short time period this man has saved my life, without him I don’t know where I’d be. 

The problem is he’s obviously had some fucked up things going on in his life we’ve only talked about it a little bit but I can tell he’s been VERY hurt and there’s definitely some sort of childhood trauma, he’s very scared of showing his feelings and I try my best not to pressure him into talking but it’s so hard seeing him suffer and not being able to do anything about it, he’s helped me tremendously and I just want to help him too...

I’m scared if I pressure him too much he’ll leave because he did try pushing me away once when we were talking about his issues and I don’t think I’ll ever recover from that sort of heartbreak. It has left an imprint on my heart since he’s the first person I’ve ever really loved...

He keeps seeing these nightmares at night about someone hurting him or touching him and I wake up and listen to him but I don’t think he remembers them and I don’t want to freak him out telling him I know. I’m scared someone has done some bad things to him when he was younger or some time in the past because I’m realizing allot of his symptoms show he’s had some sort of trauma.

What should I do? I feel so defeated, I want to help my soulmate but he won’t let me.",3.1336158357771278,3.9687058161290345,4.1415835777126135,90.46692082111437,73.09677419354837,6.926686217008798,25.058651026392962,6.980632752743323,0.7956774193548379,1153,34,259,10,22,374,151,310,0.20199999999999999,0.6859999999999999,0.113,-0.9898,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,1,3,18,21,1,5,6,0,28,7,2,0,3,54,49,22,0,7,12,0,4,1,0,4,3,2,0,2,12,12,0,1,9,2,0,2,10,17,0,1,8,8,43,4,32,33,9,33,0,5,2,2,46,16,1,13,16,161,55,0,0.1000584292945786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019406352835422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233956177873802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09400818804433543,0.0,0.08354460901758938,0.1219893795784222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500514843013936,0.0,0.1092378898836974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239451271299814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810171555002633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118509654150244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510964884309627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250240556278848,0.0,0.0,0.056865511215516966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963269916951196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856972047662935,0.2682682240599495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21422923603500785,0.0,0.0,0.10443500418748417,0.0,0.08893652936414145,0.0,0.0,0.1649684879589327,0.0,0.0,0.10594742932629267,0.10871377619557253,0.20463304623939846,0.14134845538012833,0.0488834944068459,0.1002848324457134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030663898025793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986568364983447,0.0,0.07355445840194637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389805774907292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065589616448602,0.0,0.07609894428403317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551709260894277,0.0,0.08736716102649295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914848072977361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409999194861883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334669516568155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3005278291739825,0.0,0.15946722707853495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276936668775373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16955836487884118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399901972538753,0.0,0.3216927012841755,0.17491095491451036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294874874940069,0.1282268026193373,0.0,0.0,0.17503462431072694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13586621096644336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16511736626891665,0.17705116206736118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645275524659776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MueezSaber,2020/01/14,"Do I have no future? This is what my mind is telling me I’m a 17(M) in the last year of high school. My grade 11 year was a waste, meaning I didn’t get any credits, this was due to a surgery in the first semester (if I hadn’t gotten said surgery, I would’ve been at risk of cancer) the second semester I slipped on ice (2 back to back winter storms a few hours before school lead to some parts of town not being properly salted) and fractured my ankle, as the doctor put it, my ankle would be permanently damaged if I didn’t do 1 of two things: Surgery (the recovory process was between 5-12 months) or just coming for physical therapy+them just massaging my ankle back in place+ a cast, with minimal movement on my part.

After about 5 weeks of this, I was back to school with a cast, and crutches. I was demotivated as hell, as the school said they weren’t going to provide my math and chem work (which is bizarre to say the least) no one I knew was actually in any of my classes either, so I was just clueless on those 2 classes, this compounded with the fact that we had stairs, and all of my classes were on different floors, my family and I decided it would be best if I just dropped that semester.

Now here I am, I’m grade 12, I’m taking night school with normal school, and I would be lying if I said I was trying, I’ve stopped caring, I started skipping my first period physics (This was the only class available to me) I have no clue how to do physics, and after stumbling a few times I said fuck it and decided to just skip the rest of the semester. Before I started skipping my physics I would actually not even show up to school since I dreaded that class that much. 

All my friends are worrying about university’s and getting into good ones, and here I am just no caring. If I had access to a gun, I most likely would’ve taken my own life by now, but my friends and family, and the moments of joy with them want me to keep going, but I’m pretty much a loser that isn’t willing to take responsibility, there is no chance at me making a decent living, what do I do? 

I know I’ve rambled on, but I only ever unload like this once in a blue moon, last time I did it made me feel better. My family opted for a counselling , I have no clue wether that would help. They want me to talk to someone about my problems, but my problems mostly stem from school. I have peace of mind when I’m not at school.",4.49618499012508,4.826777520408164,5.4328834759710345,84.26451283739304,69.71428571428572,8.363396971691904,28.45951283739302,8.259297600419973,1.7468183015141543,1875,62,397,25,31,617,222,490,0.098,0.805,0.09699999999999999,0.8062,2,0,0,1,0,0,59.0,1,0,3,7,23,19,2,2,24,0,45,4,0,4,4,71,77,28,0,15,20,0,1,2,2,6,3,5,0,0,21,20,0,2,6,1,1,6,14,8,0,6,26,8,59,11,58,41,16,57,1,2,1,1,14,20,2,9,32,280,80,21,0.0,0.0,0.13120978247620269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914347757007584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20677692129594927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441225921817405,0.0,0.07055170395480881,0.05945775805315132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370869804741396,0.0,0.0,0.05791102306666699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023901655168678,0.0,0.06881077066851006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044403501240122975,0.06081163141297233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19012990254981527,0.0,0.033992528378664726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143683112427727,0.0,0.0,0.10388046864644457,0.062151260485246024,0.07024777584348996,0.0,0.07641451438326753,0.05638770921350384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045061553188870514,0.07103013911093771,0.0,0.0,0.06620609950329598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05975539089534851,0.0,0.0,0.03694678498579981,0.10959968749946802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047485168715717806,0.0656884710365009,0.0,0.05936361086514945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361281824667081,0.04487525375506115,0.0,0.0,0.07323106864738202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357623571229091,0.0,0.053660798096583945,0.0,0.09884072259910108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308898250500136,0.06586922738350798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159569247884758,0.09111095005562243,0.10225994189175534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456028807272736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023901655168678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839510849006275,0.0,0.128656352933985,0.0,0.06758277133074496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557971300461712,0.053462453639052665,0.0,0.6123454954899004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05561174801792206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569621191952901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516873732080176,0.0,0.0,0.05620567052568639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010942727329502,0.05403537008598125,0.0587602898242247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044663337479925534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784024477582478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045643441473460084,0.0,0.06567204844566392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930570616634645,0.0,0.05392629660550592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048942830184378165,0.0682733607993768,0.0,0.3342982071423788,0.0,0.0,0.08658533618635042
mentalhealth,CatLeftie,2020/01/14,My mum thinks my low moods are caused my the propranolol She has decided that is why I am sad. Even thought the propranolol doesn't have those side effects. But I can't argue with her,3.4493693693693714,5.160716459459461,3.5713513513513497,91.4247747747748,73.5945945945946,8.176576576576577,25.84684684684685,8.841846274778883,1.6806468468468476,147,5,32,3,3,45,31,37,0.14,0.8059999999999999,0.055,-0.4878,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,0,2,0,7,0,0,2,0,7,9,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,7,0,1,8,0,2,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,21,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5615456014795386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.361047827179456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35026218408119353,0.0,0.4339678095302446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.493253835912272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymousse100,2020/01/14,"Why do I need certain things to be perfect? I always feel like certain, unimportant things need to be perfect with no distractions or anything. This can sometimes lead to me being more stressed about enjoying it than me actually enjoying it. 

For example, when I’ve been looking forward to seeing a movie for ages, I’ll get pissed whenever something slightly irritating (like someone talking) happens. 

Does anybody know what this is and what can I do about it?",8.242962962962963,9.303990086419759,7.626765432098768,69.23644444444446,61.716049382716044,10.430617283950617,44.59506172839506,10.355215969177356,5.1668498765432105,371,23,56,8,5,116,58,81,0.161,0.621,0.218,0.7709,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,3,11,1,2,1,0,9,1,1,1,4,12,17,3,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,1,3,5,8,10,13,1,4,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,1,5,39,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.24001068060539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20464921528959687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023950161219044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21523156918885866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435917075224268,0.17570596728625626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849816662312366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21749182969827252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516710177049682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403164511648737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065351603781178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647360356709928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959894569405501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20839173328050464,0.18934350504091074,0.24324978419996146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817336724312169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19768443642458852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3267950856822544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22193065763865044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anomaly1994,2020/01/14,"Overwhelming feeling of sadness Does anyone ever have overwhelming moments of sadness where it gets to the point you don’t know what to do. It feels like it gets to the point where it feels like I am doing things for the sake of it and that I just want everything to stop.

Side Note: 25M and never felt suicidal just feel empty.",4.054923076923078,5.623573876923075,4.366153846153846,86.91384615384617,71.76923076923076,7.661538461538463,25.30769230769231,8.238735603445708,1.4696769230769229,262,8,52,4,5,82,43,65,0.134,0.71,0.156,0.1506,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,2,3,0,5,0,0,0,2,14,14,2,1,1,2,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,5,3,2,8,13,0,9,0,4,0,0,1,5,0,0,6,35,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983615939122126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20004154605622315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067736688142335,0.0,0.0,0.2054428732566455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4623299616743438,0.3266109472668037,0.21948323145484186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388587511911373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562764893649578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22335605606063974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763034903444632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4321848107506374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19111233217599607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500414790640742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186571939660898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348289088855208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,faku_b7,2020/01/14,"info/guidance for parents about depression hey, im looking for some content that can help parents understand depression better. my mom and her friend (who also has a son with depression and bipolar disorder) are doing more damage than helping even though they have the best intentions.

i talked to them today and i rralized they know very little about depression and how to deal with it. thought they could use some guidance and information.

if anyone knows of any videos, articles or anything that could help i would appreciate it. (even better if its in spanish or with spanish subs)

tanks and stay safe...",7.914070080862538,9.425762320754716,6.9025067385444725,72.5461320754717,62.58490566037736,9.830727762803237,36.84097035040431,9.957137785484203,3.9829234501347694,490,23,75,10,7,149,76,106,0.142,0.674,0.184,0.5378,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,4,3,7,10,0,0,2,0,8,1,0,3,0,27,14,13,0,5,4,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,6,9,0,1,5,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,9,5,12,10,4,4,0,5,1,0,18,2,0,6,1,56,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620581766762095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881702711375996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160540995631448,0.0,0.11957925442777426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15249580018527856,0.2570330093613561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320393436811429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981011574326678,0.5006274637839164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665399460000262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919541860244192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226755912237296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921983691079905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569617116520752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971916268080294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564062809196632,0.0,0.0,0.12202533918256506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701874586359845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32270318065091164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548830760477305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679614435460738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142768134838041,0.1153613612494803,0.0,0.0,0.13773862363746833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512747393576633,0.0,0.12550276511138164,0.0,0.11989747774327653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322535457994483,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,apocrypha_1,2020/01/14,"I can't get rid of my irrational intuition of somehow knowing that I will die very soon. I keep feeling like ""this night will be my last"" every day. I'm a bit of a hypocondriac and have gotten health checkups where they've said that I'm ""fine"". Even so, I feel like my health is deteriorating. I'm an alcoholic and take promethazine daily sometimes mixing the two together. I've not been able to seek help anywhere, I have no friends and my family doesn't take me seriously whenever I say I'm not okay. I'm 20 years old but I can't get over the thought of dying.",2.0229249011857675,4.121575260869566,3.775968379446642,86.61146245059288,79.0,7.312252964426879,25.23715415019763,8.296473431620573,1.6317826086956515,445,17,94,9,11,149,77,115,0.069,0.8340000000000001,0.09699999999999999,0.2401,0,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,5,1,10,4,0,0,0,12,26,5,2,0,3,0,2,2,1,2,4,2,0,0,3,3,1,1,4,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,4,4,12,5,6,19,1,8,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,8,49,15,0,0.17687476060675786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890253280390724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931014284212158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406958810749886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36713615317293774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682411123516714,0.0,0.14902461435706565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674178284947636,0.0,0.17886638690938986,0.2527187286374321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665300128796695,0.0,0.18481952436100804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760191989765919,0.0,0.0,0.11855542367477125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721441413163112,0.0,0.0,0.09720574275486857,0.1441765370543329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728241474864153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598498100456058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856003077195244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682484012496514,0.14065790886755666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749336609160014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659756152814537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041880281928448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17278094020489188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14594020132402472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139015467639341
mentalhealth,FocusThrowawayFocus,2020/01/14,"I am unable to concentrate at anything. Hey! I've noticed something worrying in my behaviour - I can't focus.

When I try to learn anything for school, or even attentively watch a movie I just can't put my mind around it. Even when I remove any distractions (silence anything that makes noise, turn off my phone, smoke a cigarette beforehand) I still can't concentrate. I'm just reading the text or watching the video while my mind is just empty, and afterwards I don't remember much detail. It's irritating because my grades suffered from it, and overall it just makes me feel dumb and less intelligent than I really am. 

What could be the cause? How can I fix this issue?

I've had some personal problems since august, but I'm not sure if it's connected. When I got into a new school, I've started caring too much about my appearence and impressions I make on new people. I was constantly worrying what my crush and new colleagues were thinking about me, and it was actually very stressful, causing IBS sometimes and making me start smoking which I continue do to this day. 

I never really ever put much effort into education, but I still did better than now and for sure I picked things up quicker whether I was reading or watching anything. It's honestly alarming to me.

Sorry if some things are unclear, but English isn't my first language and I'm kind of in a hurry.",5.280538508433246,6.864827945945947,5.945620808778702,76.71477748425117,68.76833976833977,9.00475513107092,32.93659825238773,9.414487439383343,3.2275590733590738,1094,50,190,23,19,356,150,259,0.133,0.8029999999999999,0.064,-0.8879,0,0,3,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,3,18,13,1,3,7,0,19,0,0,8,4,51,34,23,0,4,14,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,15,12,0,0,5,3,0,4,7,6,0,1,7,4,29,7,21,25,6,33,0,1,3,0,3,9,1,9,20,134,44,6,0.0,0.0,0.10109898950081052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045178533282383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3410170173812718,0.09222626914494182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631538070481442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162608372203508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056274535183115,0.21285217902390605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11195516526957457,0.0,0.08271644324501674,0.0,0.0,0.0668136501047088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685409794772307,0.09371244079094944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052383445880400295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812239818822645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285865776365718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813184108848654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10788381399661713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766161316700286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092136250567085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284745158718194,0.0,0.07990297069684693,0.3001735683406607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794967630289024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182343281216999,0.09045982279570906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913153599537892,0.0,0.20829391712289053,0.0,0.0,0.2072567559352578,0.0,0.13273806415937278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117358992082364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096981546178376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856992736803802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975660491397236,0.10246338753290486,0.1159721012568688,0.14665771093624305,0.0,0.1654707342836629,0.0,0.1186738420111323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19528419300998492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765492790975714,0.06638291611128498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033783187839866,0.11268742277396447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548113225661008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104223528575125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dephaa,2020/01/14,"Dealing with misplaced shame First off, thank to anyone who takes the time to read this post.

A little history for context. I have always been a bigger guy 6'4"" 290, currently. Right now I am pretty happy with my weight, but not how I look.

I have struggled with my weight since the day I was born. When I was younger I lost nearly 200lbs using a meal prep service. I put all that weight back on and a little more. 

Five years ago a made a decision to tackle my binge eating disorder with help. I got to a psychiatrist and got some meds, got to a psychologist and an exercise program. With a lot of effort I have lost 230lbs and kept it off for 3+ years now. 

I am starting a series of reconstructive procedures to correct the damage I did to my body through the years of neglect. 

I have put myself into the dating scene again but find myself having a real hard time. My weight loss and self care has been a huge part of my life and a huge victory for me. It is something I do religiously everyday and take great pride in. However, I feel this immense shame when talking to potential sexual partners about what I do day in and out. Like I try to avoid these huge gaps of time in my life and day. 

I also have avoided physical contact due to my excess skin yet still have those desires. This will still be something I struggle with post surgeries but I hope that in time I will see myself the way others do. If you get anything from this know body dismorphic disorder is a real motherfucker.

My question is how do I get passed this shame over how bad I let myself get and focus on the great things I have been able to accomplish?",4.994165554072097,5.709714380062309,5.590120160213621,82.20971962616827,68.75077881619939,8.606497552291946,28.369826435247003,8.704169506293173,2.006098531375167,1280,42,253,20,21,414,176,321,0.165,0.7,0.134,-0.9042,2,2,2,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,7,14,21,0,7,22,0,28,12,3,5,2,46,49,20,0,3,5,0,7,1,1,2,3,0,0,3,15,18,6,4,6,2,0,3,1,13,0,2,13,9,39,8,40,32,5,52,0,5,2,0,10,19,0,5,28,179,54,4,0.08872188609969492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864659885509491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095086025959146,0.07382371659705547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06203640564750874,0.0,0.07301055266542958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822165393546895,0.07407906897758712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19710002907852936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045787588238313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17165483026738793,0.09146836880384006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20336593594797564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078463892313447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044860451406407535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109019656263194,0.075466790992804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390605708788503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128769916373984,0.19563238528137286,0.0,0.08784861607376009,0.0,0.09444609752989364,0.07947738319090862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05946841007553146,0.0,0.0,0.08812085178317981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0487592283226202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072413962863007,0.12533378394021066,0.04334503203274097,0.1778452758953645,0.0,0.0,0.07450403914574233,0.0,0.19370083852203368,0.07542817483728945,0.0,0.08395079383299196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855001453926468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607715676128514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699420837779635,0.09026205425719958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17838000135912987,0.099388817389164,0.0,0.08874589550209493,0.20196986014848176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576800596098976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069985636014052,0.0,0.09255627672635837,0.0,0.0,0.07339166100834102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13660488495744452,0.0,0.0,0.06279780763040574,0.0,0.14170682569189755,0.0,0.0,0.1855027578762612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334156335440197,0.07131129132162041,0.0,0.08168319255927294,0.0,0.0,0.0589428788099135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20693778106896094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06023633680413493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662722338978979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042330352206658,0.0,0.4321574218166061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714019573607169
mentalhealth,Sophie80085,2020/01/14,"Reality of a Weirdly Fetishized Disorder I’m a 21F diagnosed with adhd and antisocial personality disorder and classified as secondary psychopathic (sociopath). I’m aware that a lot of people masquerade as psychopaths and sociopaths online and quite honestly I find it funny  and pathetic more than anything. I have a theory as to why they do this though but that’s not what this is about. I see a lot of people with BPD, NPD, OCD, etc. give context to their symptoms so I thought I’d do try and do the same. 


The reality of it is simple, we don’t feel empty or dead inside (unless one is comorbid with depression or another mood disorder). Instead, this feeling is one I call neutrality. It’s not negative or positive, just....meh. 



Emotions are **fleeting** for people with aspd. This means that if a friend were to call me and say “let’s go to a rave and pop molly later on today” I’d be excited for about 5 minutes before going back to meh. If I get angry, 5-10 minutes of pure rage before back to meh. And in between those short fleeting feelings are hours, days, or even weeks of just straight meh. **WITH THAT BEING SAID**, it is a spectrum. Some people may feel more emotions for longer, some may feel very little to almost zero emotions. A primary psychopathic (psychopath) individual will have the least amount of emotions from his non-psychopathic aspd and sociopathic counterparts. 


Violence does not equal aspd 100% of the time. What I mean by this is whenever you see someone on askreddit ask about “sociopathic thoughts you’ve had”, thoughts on murdering people aren’t sociopathic, just murderous. A correct answer to a question like this would be something like “I saw an old man who looked to be a widower but also wealthy. All of a sudden thoughts in my mind sprouted you about becoming his new lover and wife, and taking care of him so that when he’s close to death, he’ll sign all of his money and assets to me and not his children. But then I realized that’s a crazy thought”. **That’s** more of a sociopathic thought. Doing a bad deed isn’t sociopathic. But doing it to an extent that signifies a lack of empathy, remorse, and manipulation *is* sociopathic. 



“The Mask” is different for psychopaths and sociopaths. For a sociopathic individual, it’s just your own personality adjusted to fit the person you are talking to, whether it be complementing the personality or mirroring it. A psychopathic individual, however, has the closest thing to what is usually perceived as a mask. A high functioning psychopath would lack even more emotions than I-as a sociopath- already lack, and thus will actually create an almost new persona to replace the personality he/she already lacks. 



Let’s cut to the chase: a psychopath cannot bond or love, BUT a sociopath can. A sociopathic individual has the ability to bond with and even love someone. It will most likely only be one or two people at most. The love and bonding in a sociopath is still majorly different than a NT. It doesn’t stop them from being total asshole to you. A sociopath who loves you may also get bored and abuse, leave, cheat, etc. before reverting back to caring about you. It’s also possible for a sociopathic individual to actually be a good partner as well. It’s all subjective. 


This is all I’ll say for now, if you have any other questions I’ll be happy to answer.",4.304499031670082,6.842132443181818,5.730905673274098,73.22334472545,73.59415584415585,8.738391433128276,31.58623832308043,9.368774924056119,3.3901638528138527,2659,128,447,68,57,893,279,616,0.122,0.7959999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.9565,5,0,1,0,1,0,95.0,1,8,3,1,25,26,5,0,45,0,51,7,0,2,7,103,85,50,4,9,24,1,5,3,3,9,2,3,0,8,35,28,0,1,21,0,1,2,10,9,1,5,10,12,29,16,73,55,28,35,0,1,4,5,46,14,0,23,22,325,64,0,0.0,0.07449298126687877,0.12270790995392584,0.0,0.07555986746292882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259143545717192,0.0,0.13876152310449336,0.1508360299635417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04275508278272232,0.06592672273290316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05173825879491355,0.0,0.058776787276470926,0.0,0.0,0.1450339488418208,0.05249545308350261,0.0,0.06943713049499745,0.1604981991832264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791850215913525,0.0,0.12839858334844587,0.0,0.1282042888755435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040547207253124835,0.0,0.054151519435877614,0.06381370701733129,0.0,0.13137561476927045,0.2161701091148206,0.0,0.05501966817612431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35361241379761865,0.0,0.0,0.14023769006119793,0.12457899241164262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15894973807124382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746382436952036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0485747135315594,0.0,0.06569599910913594,0.06031250453917166,0.07146315749601669,0.05273400972167385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692836114477223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642766834569343,0.0,0.0,0.061916207335566124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665723183209241,0.0,0.1285816596009551,0.0,0.09214817870481501,0.06301421215021172,0.0,0.0,0.05279660429709344,0.0,0.0,0.10690296916510014,0.22697756254835494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136971972787814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348274792693939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214442444854146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597353657712186,0.0,0.127810983803014,0.047816952001361004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615249678443207,0.27448681349023185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087867828653181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408619485176367,0.06687205915584021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05980562311707033,0.09999659816899148,0.0,0.0,0.10020161008467952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654240043829293,0.04840189967445766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05020962143822147,0.05256376641746835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534803053031121,0.04727188278672118,0.050534092822234665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041769330687843366,0.0,0.0617713728293829,0.29947983829573804,0.0366611403438281,0.0,0.059595258307241314,0.0,0.0,0.0426859278371903,0.0,0.061416760664334914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924457175739407,0.051875944218115255,0.0,0.0,0.05043208686987394,0.0,0.056529434740844174,0.0,0.0567321568457889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932486048706181,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MentalAuthority,2020/01/14,"I'm realizing the only time I feel happy and content anymore is when I'm playing video games with a drink nearby I basically feel like I'm stuck at age 16 because of a very traumatic event around that time. I've been through a lot in my short 24 years and lately it's been crushing me. What makes it worse is I live in a beautiful tourist location but I'm becoming increasingly numb to it all. The only thing left that keeps me engaged and feeling normal is playing games while I'm drinking.  

Since the trauma is directly related to being in therapy I don't know what to do. Just the thought of more therapy makes me crazy. I'm at a loss because this has been a problem my entire life and I'm getting really, really tired.",2.831822971549002,4.842478452054795,4.631095890410961,81.86316649104322,76.12328767123287,8.05395152792413,29.038988408851427,8.841846274778883,2.5269626975763955,578,26,112,13,13,196,90,146,0.188,0.711,0.10099999999999999,-0.9377,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,9,0,0,10,0,11,5,0,2,1,21,28,7,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,9,6,2,1,6,7,0,1,1,4,0,0,5,3,9,5,13,22,4,17,0,1,0,0,2,8,0,1,9,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143601195177726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14491049966935435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984608034178621,0.1797799396454509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189287938362613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24692242418485755,0.11629149965011125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504688104614977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732844753433893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14468812885024174,0.0,0.0,0.08946073494841293,0.0,0.1836251962716464,0.0,0.1768631289127344,0.0,0.11497774688894324,0.07952706708880766,0.0,0.14373949612203035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839144278726942,0.0,0.0,0.21731650986505405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15949180678312236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24760610594222165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15576039828202035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085646462858406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465495986623408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37231082743275984,0.0,0.10814513354108664,0.0,0.0,0.1292307321026082,0.18983899684108232,0.1870939729758928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431220521498138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658887738774926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048262766836604
mentalhealth,irllyluvmygf,2020/01/14,"I wanna help my girlfriend, but don't know how. Any and all help would be really appreciated! i would like to preface everything with a heads up that despite me reading about depression, anxiety, psychopathy and other things numerous times, im not very knowledgeable about much of it. now onto the details! we are minors, and her parents refuse to take her to therapy, and call her a psycho among other things and it frustrates me that they dont even try to get her the help she needs. i didnt wanna turn to reddit, but i need people to talk to, not websites. i want to help her, and do everything i can for her. what i want to know is how to properly talk to her on the ""bad days"", and other in general helpful stuff. i dont know what im looking for, i just know i wanna help her. if i correctly recall, some possibilities of issues are Depression, anxiety, psychopathy, eating disorder(s?), and others i can elaborate on if necessary. she's self harmed, and has past trauma with previous partner(s). at the top of my head, there's 2 things i want to address. the first is that she says she doesn't care about most people, yet wants to. furthermore, if someone is saying they need help yet previously ignored her, they are immediately unimportant. the other is openness about death, and her describing having frequent feelings of black tar inside her, and a bunch of maggot-related things that extend to her seeing herself dead, and shes had multiple bad dreams. theres more but i wont make this too long, but anything at all is helpful! and cutie i know you use reddit so if you see this i am sorry if i got anything wrong i already feel like a dunce but i think the people here would be helpful!!! i wanna help despite my stupidity. oh, and thank you so much to anyone who reads this and anyone who comments? i think i owe you my life. i am also sorry if i made any in general mistakes... anyways i think thats everything at the top of my head! (California is the state we workin' with here)",4.329307657859381,5.841211566233767,5.433300492610838,79.75428571428574,71.0,8.635020152261532,28.34079713390059,9.130062681391069,2.409866995073892,1563,58,294,32,29,517,185,385,0.162,0.68,0.157,-0.5072,2,0,0,0,0,0,62.0,2,4,3,3,20,15,2,0,13,0,29,5,3,5,3,75,59,31,2,21,14,1,2,2,1,4,1,2,1,1,24,21,1,2,11,3,1,0,8,11,0,1,4,8,59,4,44,49,8,23,0,2,4,0,49,13,0,8,11,221,83,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842366699700308,0.0610444191894148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038197251610566,0.0,0.11679088331041985,0.0,0.0,0.10674927231313344,0.0,0.12563305831254734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747170994922732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794573631191491,0.0,0.07782778776951851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04922923356809585,0.0,0.13149304127083394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17892618976368405,0.0,0.0,0.07810892685595458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05041800846130326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058127269723805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719371380867546,0.054533156144124385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06492981772721927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03988146044736317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06105142002859261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350226849099208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5116519433163619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490803498639495,0.07967305562188054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097563554682933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05391709147323182,0.07458605281188417,0.0,0.0,0.06755335054788046,0.06410148911904752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222925037519211,0.05095366041724187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122288164028798,0.1698024901359539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476007754515634,0.0,0.07286961581014266,0.15876153498715515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605532278913462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15270968178676955,0.0,0.048901632777417436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140801354196662,0.0,0.0,0.12165692290380364,0.0,0.07963320154855344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467770620229467,0.0,0.0,0.17089973833819594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873843776336788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057393806295544574,0.12270905086839998,0.0,0.07027826060282158,0.08729479174155365,0.0,0.2028521593191999,0.1467355881793133,0.0,0.0,0.04451107642487425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05182590007862942,0.08302967203905674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592822594134662,0.0,0.0629836959802526,0.18009551737381926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16267684206596927,0.08345944682158937,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,therapudicthrowaway,2020/01/14,"Had a suicide plan, friend reported it. Subsequent hospitalization and more. Before i start, I'm using a throwaway so my brother doesn't see this.

      It started when I was expressing suicidal thoughts to my best friend who shall not be named, specifically about why life is meaningless and how I wanted to end it.  I also had a date for it.  After realizing him trying to talk me down wasn't working he reported it to a teacher that I am close with, subsequently getting me sent to the counselors office and then a mental hospital and therapy the next day.

Sorry if my formatting sucks I'm on mobile and kind of a dumbass",4.306666666666665,6.49640620512821,5.916589743589742,73.48257692307695,72.41880341880342,9.466324786324787,31.35811965811966,9.888512548439397,3.5706417094017087,494,23,85,14,10,168,84,117,0.159,0.755,0.086,-0.8399,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,3,5,5,1,0,8,0,9,1,0,2,0,15,20,11,2,2,2,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,6,1,11,4,12,12,2,13,0,0,1,0,10,3,1,1,9,62,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250527315167712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17291494416106465,0.0,0.21325413960317785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105227560946872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17998187184887784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31399581754910233,0.0,0.10616773342665148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21160974297210114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14353173957171192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20478575425258186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21611389228302624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16193037586229722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22747459169055714,0.2876631754701241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.444552890986818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333080152403318,0.0,0.0,0.2323859275761575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16132436307635592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796481579219586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17550636908773784,0.0,0.0,0.11985727619675657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18336351030195686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479377613246519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tight-Relative,2020/01/14,"Whenever someone disagrees with me or challenges me, I begin to feel highly uncomfortable to a physical extent I’ll do my best to explain this by giving a typical situation. I’ll be making a claim about something, anything, whatever. Then, somebody disagrees with me. At first it’s subtle, my pulse quickens a little, bit much else happens. But then as they go on, my pulse quickens by a lot, I sweat, I feel hot, it almost feels like adrenaline rushing through my blood as it boils. I feel like I’m in the same mode ready to kill, or hurt someone. Mentally, I feel threatened or challenged. I hold a grudge against that person for the next hour or so. I’m the type of person who likes to be in control, but in these cases I feel out of control and powerless. I know there’s nothing I can do, and so I internalize all my anger I wish I could unleash on that one person, whoever it might be, that challenged me. If we’re talking about mental disorders- I’ve been clinically diagnosed with ADHD (I was also diagnosed with OCD in the passed but I believe I don’t really have it any more if that’s possible). On my dad’s side, there is a history with depression. My cousin has Psychosis (but I don’t think that was carried through to my immediate family). The only other think I can think of is people, including my family have described me as not empathetic, and antisocial. I might be going to receive a check up because of that in the near future but so far I haven’t actually been professionally diagnosed with anything correlating to those traits. I just wanted to know- given my background, is this common? What is the cause of this and how can I fix it? I’d really appreciate any help. I just feel really on edge lately and that I can explode at any minute.",3.3371650853889925,5.574333976470591,5.033889943074005,78.50685958254272,75.41176470588233,8.15180265654649,28.614800759013285,8.933256019334266,2.6259240986717267,1392,60,254,32,31,471,178,340,0.099,0.8290000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.8731,1,0,1,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,1,7,11,11,2,0,15,0,27,7,2,5,1,54,51,26,1,5,14,2,8,3,0,2,4,0,0,3,21,12,1,3,13,0,1,5,4,4,0,2,5,8,39,7,45,39,8,32,0,2,0,0,12,18,0,10,12,183,60,5,0.0,0.0,0.0964439463168288,0.0,0.11877460554967688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896409495844824,0.0,0.0,0.07903441585745945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20162362362214706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16265754524272852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060245927350300085,0.0,0.0,0.11134770823282884,0.10371611964241252,0.0,0.10789690054292896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152576315828084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22169277945385915,0.07890781353237414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512224249291604,0.300931491841147,0.0,0.0,0.11326788635223743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255988846096951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18633649380590467,0.0,0.3498003676522929,0.14120852316871113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406485447717937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480686211986558,0.11233487601190148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739515381090923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624375004186239,0.10441945400732004,0.0,0.0,0.09732776605281808,0.0,0.1057996936706964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934089124314957,0.0,0.10862890496434326,0.0,0.11148468658542708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485022201971576,0.09905374960903808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402183871552989,0.0,0.0,0.06596987636790176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991950433285372,0.20968629085501367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265151396766611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510695994048497,0.0,0.0,0.09483017112218664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696985095325056,0.07516476409035434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851636532303566,0.2588839612527264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141611728601286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899393277400219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108920216509037,0.0,0.0,0.16747688966742205,0.0760842592069034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794359114607561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899790619887448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058292568768738874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136497671992606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dollar6767,2020/01/14,"Im starting to experience long nightmares that I can remember. This is day 5 that it's happening, and I can remember all of them in detail. What could be causing this? They are more of an adventure horror. Not exactly nightmares. They are semi lucid, which means I can control my body movements and my decisions but I can't control how the dream unfolds. The dreams are realistic when it comes to basic stuff (land, water, houses) 



I wake up in strange positions, with my hands or legs hurting from the restriction of bloodflow. In the first minute im unable to understand where I am, what day and times it is, how I got here etc.


The third day I saw such a real dream, that when I woke up I panicked and I was thinking where the fuck am I for a couple of seconds. I thought the dream was the reality.

I usually don't dream at all, so this is very strange for me. Is there something that could be causing this?",3.72391859537111,5.305966072625703,4.756205107741423,83.73571229050282,72.63128491620111,8.019313647246609,30.104150039904233,8.634040054169528,2.3384697525937748,713,31,141,13,14,233,105,179,0.122,0.794,0.085,-0.8284,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,3,3,10,3,1,0,11,0,20,6,4,6,3,29,31,11,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,15,6,1,3,7,5,0,2,3,2,0,3,6,2,21,1,17,21,4,21,0,1,1,1,3,9,1,1,10,108,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633278464443638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3021003435607115,0.0,0.12666159449906642,0.0,0.0,0.32983482593244257,0.23479830967230175,0.16269651921709066,0.0,0.2844851306254759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16398802070640875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383294220964754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250718075339368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593573962811284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760099939859613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300266315194078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16966395497850187,0.1574089315472851,0.0,0.31765599742276396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13012541777789638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601692291132553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16736325437870905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3331344033272878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131982667795046,0.0,0.0,0.10407538476430277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16832516158890493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421703764436784,0.0,0.11673301688051185,0.08573997245962457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530734078704597,0.0,0.0,0.16194334436345384,0.12132306815510766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaykiwidog,2020/01/14,"[Question] Recounting My First Panic Attack  This will be long so please bear with me.

Five years ago I had my first panic attack, or at least I think it was a panic attack. 

At that time, I was in college and just happened to have recently gone through a bad break up. 

To get my mind of things, I started going to the gym more frequently. I was already on supplements, particularly Jack3d preworkout and creatine, prior to going to the gym more often. I did not however up my dosage of supps. 

On rare occasions, I would take Adderall or Ritalin for midterms and finals (I was not prescribed for it).

I was also smoking weed. 

A couple days after taking Adderall to study, I went to the gym and did my usual Jack3d preworkout, and creatine afterwards. That same evening I took a hit off my weed pen (not dabs, just regular weed oil vape pen) before showering. As I bent over to pick some stuff up from my closet, I suddenly felt a headrush that I have never felt before. All of a sudden, I felt cold and scared. Everything I heard would echo. As I crawled in bed miserably, I could not feel anything but physical pain – my body started aching, my muscles were spasming, and I was clenching and scratching my body (not necessarily itchy but just inadvertently grasping myself in fear). After some time my chest started aching and feeling really hot. Mentally, I felt an overwhelming feeling of doom. I Honestly thought that I was about to die. I tried to sleep it off but I could just not fall asleep. 

I got up and started hyperventilating. At this point, I was just overwhelmed so I had my brother call an ambulance. However, before they came, I threw up and slowly started feeling better. They brought me to the back of the truck and took my vitals, but the paramedics couldn’t find anything wrong with me – he did say that he thought it was the creatine. 

For about 3-4 days after the incident, I would have terrible brain fog. Life literally felt like a dream, and it constantly felt like I just woke up and could not remember clearly what happened earlier that day. I had trouble focusing in class, and I would zone out even outside of class. Things got better tho after. 

I have not been able to smoke weed since then except for one time. The start of the high of marijuana where you start to lose track of time felt just like what I felt when my “panic attack” started. To avoid any trouble, I told myself I will never smoke weed as it reminds me too much of the traumatic experience. To this day, I have not smoked weed. 

Now that I’m a little older and got a better grip in life – working full time, secure job, got my own apartment - I’m starting to consider what went down that night?

Something tells me it was something I ingested/took, especially because I felt better after expelling something out of my stomach, but I don’t think It was the weed because I smoked from the same cartridge multiple times prior and felt just fine. 

Could the residual psychoactive properties of ADHD medication have interfered with my brain chemistry? I am also aware that Jack3d was very controversial with it’s ingredients so I wouldn’t be surprised if it was that. 

Or could it just be a toxic combination of all of that plus mental stress? 

I know only a doctor will be able to find out the real cause but I wanted to know what you guys thought. 

Thanks!",4.925316985645933,6.682030687400321,5.425906100478471,79.42728020334931,69.87719298245614,8.478588516746411,29.80891148325359,9.017664075816787,2.5724949760765554,2639,105,476,51,48,846,282,627,0.139,0.773,0.08800000000000001,-0.9906,4,1,7,0,0,0,76.0,0,2,2,8,25,36,4,11,28,0,47,14,8,2,5,108,104,39,1,13,29,1,17,3,0,8,6,2,3,1,32,26,0,2,26,4,0,11,14,23,0,4,49,21,73,13,78,36,12,89,1,5,0,0,14,30,0,8,50,336,105,10,0.10288851401953313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618259997914987,0.0,0.04560222987030736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05677001685276585,0.08227990748882437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034983858865382376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466848036852928,0.0,0.0,0.23410107633074215,0.0,0.03955745817603492,0.042953805775104235,0.06271988316964665,0.0,0.13132582100023502,0.0,0.0,0.18199305900774426,0.0,0.1142859445205504,0.0,0.1148576089203618,0.052530338219720064,0.058838525112730675,0.0,0.05284742292181575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055592965920433265,0.0,0.20537026582503576,0.05692209189590015,0.0,0.1327091595764099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05339101677541441,0.0,0.0,0.05265537692931384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795689314521537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04623478105553713,0.050322354734527175,0.0,0.0578890914907849,0.1040470482844394,0.0,0.4939455426618524,0.05635466897878241,0.09403823783125978,0.08751691746439312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026877501004197096,0.0,0.0584739135840367,0.0,0.16457868741210036,0.0,0.0,0.05093790249423432,0.09098397315293748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0543536820165221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05105048710311545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0565448365380363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267320022684819,0.07539919627553628,0.051560660415025994,0.0,0.04552654859728392,0.0,0.05755296466261105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05182467672700762,0.10368742249492756,0.0,0.051944034470684415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037817448154254966,0.0,0.07935396488755626,0.0,0.0,0.04827695027412287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0348599599376538,0.0391256756229315,0.05474031654819732,0.24143500526632014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05647034577628205,0.04863145112759006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057629341422245635,0.0,0.0,0.05855482705828562,0.032956508345942874,0.0,0.05079499751573552,0.0,0.058276314733504676,0.0,0.0,0.0409105379954501,0.05150467578997285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04255522100876236,0.0,0.051481409436935466,0.0,0.0,0.11881290715534958,0.0,0.0,0.3277125890428542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05892922259268647,0.0,0.058891366345527774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735935790913016,0.0,0.04496454812394953,0.04736296010068633,0.0,0.0,0.0683545569124942,0.06592680532760684,0.0,0.12252298105945265,0.17998535979690533,0.0,0.0,0.049157192168033215,0.17146938725264213,0.034927273619912734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056658581106371876,0.04244689971149763,0.03034315565909937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537868329201968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037452031801253935,0.0,0.0,0.14617809668758966,0.05624621918541888,0.0,0.033128414848070165
mentalhealth,Aarskringspier,2020/01/14,"Going to inpatient help today. Just wanted to vent. I’m a chronically ill 44 year old who lost my wife 12/13/19. I’ve been miserable for over a year and that was just the icing on the cake. Attempted suicide, failed miserably and decided I wanted to be better for my daughter and my soon to be grandchild. It was a miserable process to decide to do this but hopefully the next 30 days or so will help me cope and be a better person. I’m tired of being miserable. I don’t know what I want or need from a post like this other than just to say it out loud that I need help. I pray for everyone here that is struggling. You’re not alone.",2.522013986013988,4.220009215384618,4.086783216783221,86.81185314685318,76.07692307692308,7.804195804195802,24.125874125874127,8.575989854853784,1.5446153846153847,498,16,105,10,11,166,84,130,0.177,0.635,0.188,0.3632,0,1,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,5,6,11,0,5,8,0,11,3,0,0,0,21,22,8,1,6,7,2,0,1,0,1,3,2,0,1,10,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,7,0,0,4,2,9,4,16,13,0,12,1,6,0,0,8,3,0,3,8,68,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934690514779796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3304198429381403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204709121951295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849594708719468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616306713979484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3756254477482634,0.0,0.0,0.18553511219919985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10266070645620468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126132145499234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20391488552953585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770205072207339,0.0,0.0,0.19866452238464624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19601577200047715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631070500134343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890330689658998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14855130863420712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952845115507756,0.0,0.20432950151799747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146997724809544,0.1770650956540152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33053944304657884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405868815122912
mentalhealth,cherryswans,2020/01/14,"Something wrong with my brain this has happened before many times but today i left school because it just wouldnt stop. sometimes my heart races all of a sudden and my head feels empty or like im losing my mind and i need to grip my head to feel safe. i feel like im falling and i cant focus on anything around me. i wonder how i can see, why things are playing out around me, how im alive and what i am. i also have this fear that ill have a seizure, or if there is something inside by brain. i wasnt sure where to post this but i do have anxiety issues, im not sure if this is just an attack. im not sure what causes it to happen. all im getting from people is that i may have vertigo or im dehydrated",-0.219047438330172,1.7422578580645194,2.049753320683113,96.60639468690704,86.54838709677419,4.421252371916508,17.504743833017073,5.5289334501034215,-0.6096907020872862,548,13,129,3,17,185,91,155,0.193,0.696,0.111,-0.9122,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,9,11,1,1,3,0,16,7,5,3,5,37,25,14,0,4,11,0,4,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,11,8,0,2,4,1,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,5,18,7,12,22,2,12,0,1,1,0,0,6,0,7,6,82,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596993965223135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267328016908968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817533514992056,0.16913688484869274,0.0,0.10807404373774047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057909954991627065,0.0,0.08083637914090336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212098576301016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758920865805787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068992642626576,0.1441016686893203,0.06786665572916488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04963258203879188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16801299760060434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19499089817542886,0.0,0.0,0.11257319612413123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7182996859260646,0.0991533265100292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321570464924318,0.0,0.0,0.09282253818215584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627856509973424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631315449646384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095920991757734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043988131767874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585971544559698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098191200043293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614314055911748,0.07570117968196469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14626834443510695,0.09395554183767174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942265843766097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686037316601507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631125109651165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055394151255024365,0.0,0.09004708314561016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572100179825579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302137815778974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386550028055952,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AggressiveBroJobs,2020/01/14,"Can't help but feel despised I'm a recent university graduate and currently a PhD student, I've been struggling with mental health for years due to various reasons but for the most part managed to keep things in check. 

In the past year or so it's gotten noticeable worse, I think in part at least due to stress. One of the most prominent things in recent history that's affecting me is that even when I'm not having that bad of a day I can't shake the feeling that I'm despised by everyone I know. 

I had a fairly mixed upbringing and struggled to make friends until uni however I currently have friends and a partner of two years but I can't help but feel like everything is an act. That people would happily be rid of me if they didn't feel sorry for me.

No matter what I do I can't shake this feeling lately despite evidence to the contrary. Does anyone else ever feel the same way?",4.747284644194757,5.624853297752812,5.707359550561801,80.56343632958803,69.3932584269663,9.304119850187266,31.12546816479401,9.516144504307137,2.8136726591760297,709,29,138,15,12,234,109,178,0.165,0.6829999999999999,0.152,-0.3663,3,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,4,11,2,5,12,0,14,1,0,3,1,29,28,12,0,2,7,0,6,1,3,1,1,0,0,1,10,4,0,1,9,0,1,3,7,8,0,2,4,6,12,3,20,22,7,24,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,4,16,92,22,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943249995882988,0.138220673770332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11263560610709025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699913986152033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805162749945462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269138076562492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890999727549465,0.12202449245564664,0.0,0.12890243447481095,0.12123914268936282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092560182629037,0.09637236525143636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20844633120520228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14339206192080045,0.0,0.0,0.18084083683905533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990504244124295,0.0,0.0,0.07413734150862453,0.0,0.15217272575984764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590517432415552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900465903651382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359471584374385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15358419079356664,0.0,0.0,0.09141152094891387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921664360584073,0.1287770180040011,0.09352245935924562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869934848796647,0.2663943382501888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100915818053254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452713873362878,0.2820528910028703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792427192210001,0.0864382741270744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177739511187198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707709459296064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747430857229775,0.09582886907736143,0.0,0.0,0.2606129318540312
mentalhealth,hunterflair,2020/01/14,Favourite YouTuber of mine uploaded this video about anxiety this evening and thought it was really helpful As above. I watch him mostly for wrestling stuff but every now and then he chats about mental health and after a rough day I found it very helpful. Thought I'd share! [https://youtu.be/Tv6jRDnwSgA](https://youtu.be/Tv6jRDnwSgA),8.771176470588234,13.115165627450983,4.383823529411767,78.77220588235295,69.19607843137254,6.537254901960785,30.068627450980397,7.793537801064563,2.296592156862745,281,11,40,4,6,72,42,51,0.025,0.802,0.17300000000000001,0.8372,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,4,6,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,4,1,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,1,4,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21888597690221925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18452791136204733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889838439903661,0.0,0.2410739030891277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137229209239145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.304139072343241,0.0,0.0,0.3835691015335576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883481979476604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832999521743256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275463687264317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4543049349101376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360843146790377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zeuscakar,2020/01/14,"What should I do with my friend? How can I help her? First of all, I'm really sorry like I feel like I shouldn't write here but I just don't know what to do anymore. So this post is not about me but I don't know what the hell is going on with my friend recently. Her, me and two others are actually a great group, like, ""the squad"" type. We always knew that she's been going through some mental issues like anxiety, panic attacks, anger issues, etc. but we did nothing but support her, because we deeply care for her and we are worried for her. We want her to fully recover and live her life normally. Four months ago, she was still the same as she used to but at least she seemed happy with us. She always talked about how deeply she loved us or how we help her feel better. But for four months she has been ignoring us. She doesn't talk with us, doesn't join us when we go out, and worse, she yells at us for doing literally nothing. For example, this night my friend and her were at an event, and she literally ditched my friend at the end of the event. She also had an another girl with her, and they promised to my friend that they would do something after the event. My friend waited for 40 minutes for them after the event and when my friend called her, she just yelled and said ""you didn't have to wait."" And when my friend tried do defend herself and talked about the situation that she was in, this girl just yelled at her. And this is not something she would do. She would never do this. By telling this story and giving this example I'm trying to say that she has been very rude and ignoring to us for four months but she wasn't like this before. She was the kindest and the most caring person. And we did nothing but to support her and I'm pretty sure that we didn't even argue. Like out of nowhere she just started to act in a very rude way. And I'm very, very, very sure that we did nothing. We met with her mom and talked about her situation since her mom is very caring about her mental health, we felt like she needed to know about the situation.

Some other information: Her family is very loving to her, especially her dad, they have the best father-daughter relationship. She didn't have any friends in middle school, she was the lonely girl. She is seeing a psychiatrist and she's using pills. She always has these two nightmares: In one of them she's being watched in her room with a lot of cameras and in the other one she just shoots the whole school. (Pretty sure that last one won't happen irl so don't worry, guns are banned in where I live)

We're always trying to reach her to help her, but she's making it very difficult for us by acting like this. There are many examples like the one I talked about. She always talks about how ""sick"" she is, how ""maniac"" or ""crazy"" she is. Like it just became an obsession for her. We don't want to leave her alone, but she's just breaking out hearts at this point. We just stood by her side. Talked to her when she needed to. And I don't think that we did anything to deserve this. And I just don't know what to do because I'm really worried. Please write down all of your opinions. I'm open to all of them.",3.0697427426508845,4.5848424102964165,3.652170322107004,91.26442660059344,74.19500780031201,6.649915878988103,20.992964424459327,7.208032530483347,0.35432162368847697,2479,54,539,26,51,779,234,641,0.107,0.7,0.193,0.9968,0,3,2,2,0,0,81.0,23,2,6,3,34,47,7,2,23,0,59,7,1,8,7,121,101,48,0,10,23,3,3,10,9,6,4,5,1,4,29,49,0,5,11,0,0,5,17,13,0,10,22,10,112,34,76,72,12,54,1,1,2,2,132,24,1,8,32,385,141,3,0.0,0.0,0.04637001481785788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0421212053138819,0.0,0.0,0.04921357585060485,0.0,0.03799955491650853,0.19769093445144964,0.0,0.0,0.03231338261596959,0.049826015473091734,0.03635059226570048,0.0,0.047124377538756916,0.0,0.0,0.039102676068252136,0.0,0.0,0.05405777046633197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057932190679375814,0.0,0.040433708944327684,0.0,0.049866458065395414,0.04202517632343882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0485204598032428,0.0,0.14534111396170074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042086209823566284,0.0,0.05299433238331236,0.0313847179930004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04479506650683263,0.0,0.04805233313761546,0.03394635724584826,0.0456240444283267,0.0,0.0,0.04041817756982104,0.0,0.0,0.3304056223220831,0.0,0.0,0.045582908717679366,0.08101550274791852,0.0,0.0,0.05238797345619307,0.0,0.0,0.0420193773895137,0.05058303249046157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050508650975646135,0.0,0.0563082104293888,0.0955495017056028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991913984167997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044570265985752,0.03873292857797905,0.0,0.05031394289348565,0.0,0.0,0.0335628630033842,0.2321454481396933,0.0,0.08391726481088499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04039749569624304,0.08577240817352669,0.0,0.031718156105543766,0.048175067931136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577249234954187,0.0,0.0,0.11130333765279406,0.11378352844970085,0.0,0.0,0.07046692812174317,0.03664825883520775,0.0,0.0,0.04459175220614472,0.046556849530149616,0.1823764625172124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879576581615235,0.0,0.0,0.05575129470479274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04149025963730525,0.0,0.0521597087544493,0.0449191924053478,0.0,0.04550842316442268,0.0966843213760655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060881577870909774,0.0,0.04691758550762282,0.051015780261831525,0.0,0.0,0.0451998185148952,0.037787651509772674,0.0,0.09618005664466728,0.0378651233334869,0.0432579508080327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0393067884264761,0.1602342546283924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316225354860317,0.0,0.053191709237568656,0.03363297824659359,0.0,0.03794736445211333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784410175229553,0.13435343372290315,0.0,0.0,0.26734815118238275,0.04153220070073815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030447156978836293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678335033500587,0.0,0.09283496404231363,0.0,0.4572595368581507,0.0820793538696031,0.0,0.31365388627189,0.05605385056927648,0.037717008360401885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05305135074261197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14476832560131295,0.0484241719993652,0.10126474583284907,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway999777000,2020/01/14,"Weird days. Everything feels different. Advice? (English isn't my first language)

A few days ago I suddenly felt like something changed. I don't know how to explain it but I felt different. Since that incident I started to gradually lose emphaty towards others. I also feel the need to manipulate the people that are important in my life. I wasn't like this before. Now I feel the urge to learn skills like charisma. My childhood wasn't the best (my parents). I dont want to be like them (at least that's what I thought a few days ago and for many years).I also had a narcissistic friend. I feel hunger for power and stuff like that. How could this happen so quickly? I don't want to lose my empathy.",1.8690326797385663,4.6025566962963005,2.9781699346405226,87.85470588235296,85.74074074074073,6.139433551198258,25.718954248366014,7.510576382923642,1.6243202614379093,554,24,106,10,17,177,82,135,0.13,0.715,0.155,0.6643,4,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,6,7,10,0,0,7,0,10,2,0,3,0,20,24,8,0,4,1,1,6,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,10,2,1,0,10,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,6,6,17,7,11,16,4,14,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,16,70,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373934719241436,0.2492682469794569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22487681369640125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964092281220245,0.0,0.14755186244562565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873700060259082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225829589803504,0.0,0.0,0.2720276480432701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937958157662357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647830873615387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636293067213414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28436795089856337,0.0,0.2699976292229647,0.0,0.0,0.11959496640535695,0.0,0.0,0.10862782726215484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433282076095242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772705211985353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931050123235688,0.3434522378385662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145926559012584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14254714035157098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10425370969349587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15612054648166576,0.0,0.0,0.09747488959550928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630643250171895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082413629383754,0.0,0.0,0.0995179680371539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095427452696798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162132783947104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585998624364007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tex1_Bup,2020/01/14,"do i need to go to therapy?  Hi reddit, sorry if this post is a bit messed up it’s my first, I’ve been thinking about writing this for almost a week now I know I won’t get this done in my own time so I’m writing this In class. I’m not sure how to word this really but I can’t bring myself to do anything, it’s been like this for a few years and I don’t really know what to do, it might be my sleep but I had a good schedule until recently when I just stopped caring like I have for most other things, I’ve lost interest in a lot of my hobbies and just stay indoors when I have spare time which I have a lot of since I don’t study or do homework or have friends to go out with; I haven’t told anyone because it seems like I’m asking for attention and being lazy is easier to explain; is this foreshadowing some mental illness later in life? Thanks in advance",2.6880830933772124,3.272058203208559,4.407165775401072,89.08595228301111,73.91978609625669,7.465076100370219,24.545043192102014,7.61054688173877,0.9652948580830932,672,19,155,8,13,228,106,187,0.086,0.737,0.177,0.9703,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,8,11,0,0,6,0,23,3,1,1,1,32,41,13,0,2,8,0,0,3,1,2,2,0,1,0,15,5,0,1,6,0,0,4,6,2,0,1,6,0,17,9,23,31,7,26,0,1,0,0,7,7,0,10,16,107,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16401599733386354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145285496879195,0.0,0.1347884781751682,0.0,0.15312524799926142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984728162079172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788205890147481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16699886501363104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676180956507935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932306412330447,0.0,0.0,0.1265468121118393,0.0,0.08557558708361665,0.0,0.18617577144724914,0.13738260784218226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800337606734337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569252241282794,0.24006437525215926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17880046303225244,0.2785035457665493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16506579335267876,0.17375951417665006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145115064030558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15686934295180813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20986121808644112,0.0,0.1617267815427161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491118753154851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549206158449115,0.0,0.1639122564173596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18335393534584732,0.0,0.17458257467370145,0.0,0.1369390900967488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154373874885267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15079947782352324,0.18731267533407034,0.0,0.10881743315187198,0.10495255994179424,0.0,0.0,0.1910191579774098,0.0,0.0,0.15651215410631766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313856399252554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054779441485466
mentalhealth,Tom1169,2020/01/14,Panic attacks where you can't move. I've been experiencing panic attacks every night for a few days. When I have them there are few minutes where its like I become paralysed. Idk if this is normal or not.,2.76325,5.200860825000003,3.9450000000000043,84.59000000000002,78.25,5.0,22.5,5.985473137389443,0.4495,163,5,30,1,4,53,34,40,0.305,0.64,0.055,-0.8834,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,1,0,4,5,2,2,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,5,3,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,1,4,1,1,4,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,4,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5646412942328903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740759622354188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004426975362662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20908759272117045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123965265040737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26375744289593234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328836766720833,0.2431465407039136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5823304018222389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stubs1101,2020/01/14,"Irritable same time everyday Every day from 12-3 I get angry, it’s hard to focus, and hyper sensitive to noise. I get so easy to anger or I burst into frustrated tears and then by 4 I’m fine. Good to go. Maybe even refocused and able to work 

I am not sure what to do. It’s really affecting my work performance. Skullcap works but I don’t like using it to much. Also on Prozac but small dose and don’t want to increase if I can help it. 

Can anyone help or relate?",-0.35872841444270165,1.8738053877551013,2.521428571428572,90.412032967033,92.06122448979592,6.280690737833595,16.722135007849296,7.61054688173877,0.5201246467817899,360,9,79,8,13,126,69,98,0.126,0.6759999999999999,0.198,0.8576,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,4,3,6,2,0,0,0,6,2,0,2,1,16,12,12,0,2,6,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,1,7,4,12,12,3,9,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,3,5,46,12,3,0.2376960473399083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900854431805081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662026030084441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329428643086998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699599750319634,0.0,0.2002691716303319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483727483850799,0.0,0.13508814141083042,0.1993681670961336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21292897015478587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31864530022860305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612628223916517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387976280731665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17473394445257065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15227417448109176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22402571160069087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13860247670487827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052930671234663,0.0,0.0,0.14019928721330793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5191366602291417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustAGame-R,2020/01/14,"“Reality” issues? Before i begin,english is not my first language so if i make any grammar mistakes i am sorry.I am saying this because its kind of hard to explain.This isn’t a serious problem but i dont know why it happens.This only happens to me when i am in school (it rarely happens though).When i am sitting on my desk while listening to the teacher,i get like dizzy and I can’t belive it i am there (yeah it will be hard to explain) like i literally can’t belive it.I see people talking and i don’t understand why but my head feels light.It usually lasts for around 20 seconds.I tried my best explaining it so if people don’t understand,i get it but its really hard to explain.Maybe its some kind of reality issue i dont know but if someone has ever experienced something like this,please let me know",1.2668325358851682,3.705777048484851,3.6016905901116445,84.70779904306222,84.57575757575758,6.140350877192982,26.25996810207337,7.475848149327749,1.6891212121212114,643,29,124,11,19,221,91,165,0.08199999999999999,0.815,0.102,0.8412,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,6,9,0,0,2,1,17,1,1,1,1,23,31,13,0,5,8,0,4,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,10,3,0,0,7,0,0,0,8,3,0,1,0,8,17,6,11,28,2,10,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,4,9,76,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881774482805106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11543039029053095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904329930600892,0.0,0.11033636811101442,0.0,0.13607665527472715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30393559257531577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172904825909988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06556311622271824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029398576471036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354904536876085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293267480274241,0.0,0.34846628251797657,0.0,0.13307490852528195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27067560545166514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700547440792482,0.21378342303011652,0.1056952423405388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259245335699854,0.0,0.1900450363569548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655318147248156,0.0,0.13026710529850433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986169722430181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797884042882637,0.0,0.0,0.1423345267093432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240730216687291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306747467061709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311575009786264,0.0,0.13122909587017953,0.10332715686421527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986573283078142,0.09982335964386603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422076315183308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273963626865006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880348241470484,0.0,0.0,0.2699741308853981,0.0,0.0,0.14280897725945066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340071168395874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ryleeee_mill,2020/01/14,"When i talk to my therapist When I talk to my therapist I get put into a social mindset and become more happy than I actually am, so as soon as I walk out i just feel the same as always like suicidal thoughts. It was my first season but it every time I talk to anyone about this stuff it happens",11.694516129032259,5.2467907096774224,11.916129032258064,64.84419354838711,61.25806451612904,14.980645161290324,42.290322580645146,11.20814326018867,4.4893290322580635,232,7,48,4,2,81,44,62,0.047,0.879,0.073,0.1272,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,6,8,1,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,10,2,10,4,2,10,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,7,39,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.1983592787895196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691344345480512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212901861680888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22449244113721925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712612215921443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277790704587336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17289881368872953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619862246482838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17974834441844215,0.21638151040509648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993059929959855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20433948638235044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072051172647688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23269209365818544,0.2223411158540644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4901349657213556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.472017327610152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137129969494135,0.11852662735325878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,illgetitlater,2020/01/14,"I’m hearing explosions with nothing blowing up. (First time posting so sorry for any mistakes)

Explosion or load bang/pop is the best I can describe the sound, it’s not loud like an explosion would be but just really startling and I am questioning whether these sounds even happened or not. First time I heard it was when I was watching tv (simple stand-up comedy, nothing with gun shots or anything) when this huge “POP” happened either below the tv or in the next room over, I was home alone with all my animals sleeping near me where I could see them. So that was weird but I dismissed it as the tv or maybe the heater.  Second time it was the same sound, I was in the dining room which is next to the tv room with a big open doorway so when you stand in the tv room you see straight into the dining room. Was sitting at the table when the heater right behind me sounded like it made that same popping sound or bang and I quickly checked it but the heaters basically brand new and nothing seemed to be making that sound so by then I was weirded out. Last time it happened was today in the bath, was lying there doing my thing when right next to my right ear it sounded like something splashed/popped. It was a different sound from the other times but very similar, it was like a drop of water from a faucet but right next to my ear and as loud as something falling and hitting cement. Obviously I looked, nothing had fallen down. Any advice/thoughts on whatever these sounds or what I should do is appreciated.",6.461674362577796,6.543761150170647,6.032788596667334,82.5084119654688,65.48464163822526,8.668861674362578,32.593655892391084,8.124751697461798,2.2568776952419194,1199,45,233,13,17,370,153,293,0.08800000000000001,0.835,0.077,-0.1079,1,1,2,1,0,0,25.0,0,2,1,3,14,9,0,1,21,0,25,6,3,2,2,41,38,31,0,4,17,0,0,4,0,2,0,15,7,0,20,12,3,0,2,6,1,2,2,4,0,3,15,19,21,5,30,17,5,54,0,0,4,0,6,27,0,9,25,160,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066679670269635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007528499344096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475309687262017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080830566106015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223020400727367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760402905494232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802480832099034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520876131396326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27322470381857633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160787246552018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033087107910072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0839516876594291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012654644953635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648678604114265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745289554053632,0.06874751877190896,0.0,0.10346864337642474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946967734548506,0.4381298313351135,0.0,0.0,0.3952918712782616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863723368299154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537387077234795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597888924590202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35181616435552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641415262922272,0.09375944728040994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306571848594062,0.0,0.0,0.15857552950086706,0.0,0.11529037240221328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842286950791866,0.0,0.0,0.08176361921741179,0.30027539111218154,0.0,0.0976237472637754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497864110782179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731620925242415,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mortovecz,2020/01/14,"I dont care about anything After everything that happened, I just dont care anymore, like I want to go to a forest and lie there for eternity and think about nothing, just stare up at the trees and let the time pass",7.874772727272727,5.705558750000005,7.471818181818183,80.67772727272728,63.77272727272727,10.618181818181819,35.63636363636364,8.841846274778883,2.776127272727273,171,6,36,2,2,54,33,44,0.17300000000000001,0.797,0.03,-0.7241,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,9,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,8,8,0,7,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,4,24,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24393126812186325,0.0,0.0,0.20240830454349146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5015555867344708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5765384874798877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210575553891536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13978762411999926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175061093143429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515159605426876,0.0,0.1201661146757025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360101294749993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15760449263111667,0.0,0.0,0.14342421705839775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450765778416022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sticcsandsnaccs,2020/01/14,"So f***ing of this shite I can never relax because I'm always on auto pilot waiting for something catastrophic to happen , like for a close friend or family member to die in a traumatic accident.  I just want to kill myself so that I don't have to ever expose myself to other people going through injury or sickness. I told my mentor that I wasn't self harming but I only meant in terms of using sharp objects, I'm still punching myself several times every few days . I feel sad because I feel like I can't be honest with people and im just giving them the answers they want to hear , and to protect myself from possibly getting sectioned or placed in a pysch hospital. I can't take this anymore ?",7.539873949579826,6.714535676470593,8.29890756302521,70.1679411764706,63.55882352941178,9.830252100840337,34.86974789915966,8.841846274778883,3.1600747899159662,556,21,92,7,7,188,92,136,0.174,0.6970000000000001,0.129,-0.7387,0,0,1,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,2,0,6,8,1,0,4,0,7,1,0,1,2,20,23,8,2,2,6,0,3,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,5,4,0,2,4,1,0,1,5,3,0,0,3,4,17,5,18,19,3,14,0,1,0,0,7,7,0,3,8,66,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15418087992259932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837635604002538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22590909794560055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950040806012882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19230769938630046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676105840240552,0.15611963295501685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17468031069252116,0.0,0.18738216362953464,0.13237529694658715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14315901098164685,0.0,0.09680936411292022,0.17775253566949267,0.10530782587228753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16385639022071732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088417394649888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20015117080798409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20500225654825852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810522549429004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14291147974292132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092574220173607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25692143793618794,0.0,0.19359458564027487,0.0,0.0,0.20889307924777945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19330384388421215,0.20933141740343014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14264969535077782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479773986147875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13931931852959886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804742244484616,0.0,0.0,0.17705799786300025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003600567482945,0.0,0.0,0.2185844289674146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,redwindow56,2020/01/14,"How to develop a positive mindset regain excitement I (21M) have been feeling numb with little to no excitement for anything for the past few years. It started senior year of high school during drama where I essentially lost all but 2 friends. I was extremely depressed during that time and had 0 motivation. After months I was able to pull myself back up out of that hole and regain many of the friends I lost. During freshman year of college I did a good job of putting it behind me and enjoying life. I essentially erased all those months from my memory along with the people who hurt me. However starting at the end of freshman year I kind of lost interest and excitement in life in general. It wasn’t the same depression as before, I’m not sad, I’m more numb. 

I’m a junior now and been this way since. Life kind of bores me and I don’t have excitement for anything like I used to. I tried focusing on what used to make me happy, fishing, but I feel like I’m just doing it cause it should make me happy. Over the past year I’ve been thinking of my senior year more and more and remembering it and idk if that’s correlated. I’ve developed such a shit negative mindset about literally everything. From school, to hobbies, to the future, everything is gray and bleak when I think about it. I miss looking at something with excitement and interest. I’ve also lost trust and hope in everyone. Everybody thinks they’re some magician with the secret to happiness, but I think that there’s nothing to improve anything and it pisses me off. 

I think a big issue is that before I had hope. I had hope that the future would be better, but now I don’t want the future to come. I don’t want to get a 9-5 job,  only be off on the weekends, settle down and have a family, and get older. I feel like I’m in the prime of my life, but it still doesn’t feel great. I’ve started to not trust friends and think that they don’t want to be friends with me and that they purposely exclude me on hanging out. It’s probably related to when many of them dropped me senior year, our friendships have never felt the same, there’s just always been something there between us.

I’m extremely fortunate to be doing good in college, have a very supportive and loving girlfriend, and be very well off financially. However I’m still not happy while I have no reason not to be.I wish to relive the past, I’m numb towards the present, and depressed about the future. I want to improve my negative mindset in order to regain interests and excitement. I want to take charge of my life again and enjoy every moment of it instead of just existing. Anyone been like this before?
Anyways thanks for listening to my rant.",5.646016076798518,6.2255748912213775,6.3435669673837625,77.86421350913719,67.26335877862597,9.710293777469351,31.718482535276433,9.725611199111238,2.962967684478373,2129,83,400,44,33,699,220,524,0.126,0.61,0.263,0.9983,4,0,2,0,0,0,52.0,2,0,3,6,24,54,2,0,24,0,34,11,2,8,3,83,83,34,0,12,13,0,5,4,5,2,8,1,0,0,24,31,0,0,15,2,0,4,15,16,1,0,17,8,45,38,74,59,9,70,0,10,2,1,14,24,2,5,43,269,69,11,0.0664062041067875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05310501743229724,0.05525528150694441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04643276193261738,0.0,0.16393994341380028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05106227194776634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695203659405056,0.0,0.0,0.05873089108951701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821746404846643,0.0,0.057203064830841886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17158669887363598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588161864329847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055950091036066636,0.06345397379939344,0.11936322870884294,0.0,0.06260185923106157,0.0,0.13430788831829238,0.09488121096495193,0.06376036982595296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20522107426076971,0.0,0.06938900166159473,0.0,0.0,0.1113967467675188,0.0,0.0732130744622279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28276255636009257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016180059242283,0.0,0.19786903300282507,0.0,0.0,0.07108921494209731,0.0,0.0,0.06931082421401795,0.13179582186119676,0.0,0.0,0.13830368543042434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345233291269676,0.12977086807857374,0.06655646205077756,0.0,0.0,0.05576448661982696,0.0,0.2899608649909954,0.0,0.0599341918776843,0.0,0.08865331378781273,0.1346509361968151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600959713179092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05121655841978135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371854382569142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05050491060137364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19017670751563714,0.046037700606779884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159711959903399,0.0,0.0,0.06675657664396824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827663775945354,0.0,0.0,0.07522528413715468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441324762820908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816501423282244,0.05493189825991323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022454804700041,0.0,0.0,0.14100795917292294,0.0,0.10606416076014263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535697347126064,0.0,0.0,0.049929201134234005,0.0,0.0,0.0611379107866346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553024853597767,0.0,0.0,0.0387219916392151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045085453570788483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987848716021027,0.11470727822086454,0.0,0.1095841460168011,0.19584049853802332,0.05271015386559371,0.0,0.0,0.05970715255650879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636385747669981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04717306211038738,0.0,0.0,0.2993439276229293
mentalhealth,greenguythirdeye,2020/01/14,"I'm going to visit my doc tomorrow and I will probably get back on the medication. I need some advice. My main problems are anxiety, depersonalization and something I can only describe as a complete loss of emotional shades (I think people who are depersonalized will understand me) although recently I've become depressed as hell. I've tried various antidepressants, benzos and antipsychotics in the course of four or four and a half years, antipsychotics pretty much ruined my life and I've decided to quit everything altogether. I didn't quit cold turkey, but withdrawals were brutal as fuck. Especially venlafaxine, that was pure hell.

Now I'm off meds for around two years, maybe one and a half. My sleep is back to normal (after I've stopped taking clozapine my sleep was gone for a long time and I've had to take sedatives), my weight is somewhat manageable and I look somewhat fit again. But my mental state is becoming worse. I've tried therapy, but it didn't work at all. My immune system is practically shutting down thanks to anxiety and low mood, recently I started getting palpations (I don't know if that's how you call it, I feel my heartbeat when I lie down), my motivation is gone completely and sometimes I feel really suicidal (never actually happened to me before, it's not just *thoughts* it's more like a *feeling*). 

I've visited a cardiologist recently just to check if my heart was okay, and when she saw my blood pressure she was shocked and asked how I was feeling, I told her about my anxiety and after talking a little I asked for the prescription for phenibut (in Russia it's a prescription drug). It's been seven days after I've started taking it in the 250mg/two times a day dosage, but today I've had to take 500mg in the evening because I was feeling just *too* shitty. I've also noticed that sometimes I crave alcohol just because it makes me numb and my anxiety becomes less prominent, I'm really afraid to get addicted and dependant on it although I don't drink too much (maybe two-three strong IPAs twice or once a week). So basically I've decided to get back on the medication so I don't get addicted to something really dangerous and in hopes that my life becomes somewhat bearable. Tomorrow I will be visiting a shrink, I know him for a very long time and he always listens when I suggest something and I'm here to ask you guys for some advice. I only need some substance to keep my anxiety on a leash for half of a year while I'm finishing university and then I will be able to fix my inner problems by myself. I was thinking about acid, as microdosing, when done properly, helped me a ton, but I'm afraid of it making my situation worse. Also considering Wellbutrin and Buspar, although there might be some problems getting the first one here in Russia. 

Sorry for such a long post, I didn't intend to make it so huge. Also pardon me if the narration is messy, I just don't feel too well. If you have any advice on what I should do, if you can suggest some medication I could consider taking or you just want to share your story, you are very-very welcome. Thank you for reading.",5.422643539709308,6.8128940303541325,6.3329547097085035,74.80602164137156,68.22428330522766,9.762290211194092,32.33152653978961,10.01380297108016,3.395485537621457,2492,108,443,61,42,825,274,593,0.145,0.7659999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.9884,0,0,6,0,0,0,70.0,0,8,0,7,35,27,5,3,24,1,42,18,4,8,3,87,95,54,1,15,20,0,7,1,0,6,11,1,0,1,17,21,3,2,15,2,1,6,9,17,1,11,20,12,64,9,55,65,16,69,2,4,2,1,30,22,3,19,39,301,81,4,0.06181949368504538,0.0,0.0603269082674316,0.1347847460333688,0.0,0.18122788127128048,0.0,0.06606623824076913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14831108029548867,0.05143877100234395,0.0,0.0,0.042039375586597434,0.0,0.2364587173083231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05503245587345615,0.1733786447318701,0.0,0.0,0.14260612426255356,0.0,0.0753691791252162,0.2730990954567307,0.05260383590511799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312461488618197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963312592736692,0.0,0.0,0.04935783540952534,0.0,0.0,0.07973691845548514,0.0,0.053245039325938125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326280530957186,0.0,0.060559568884298115,0.07169098628436034,0.0,0.0,0.06953860971930445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040831192545441805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05555937478015495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18754676085067346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052583629747996616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715112576577444,0.19378880366957046,0.0,0.03513344289200231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06121101799514676,0.05466677410367249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325639766603588,0.0414363035180859,0.0,0.0,0.061400705956698935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494800642142692,0.0,0.0,0.06794875401974282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732987321874952,0.03020188199127265,0.06195937323612895,0.0,0.16412491969574328,0.05191280505810197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379497621301007,0.0,0.1242119810226595,0.0,0.06866752127682903,0.1868299084412787,0.062299509534435527,0.06558071354625347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908888818012343,0.09167674251100184,0.04767900458080557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605699782900285,0.0,0.0703819032972695,0.0,0.06583574320455927,0.08378097764411672,0.09403302128110268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04285785312104507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05920598646387089,0.06289264958684594,0.06665186999398932,0.1774587196548054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315052820918678,0.06183622291799225,0.0,0.11880945189973535,0.0,0.1831178761640836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948770103724154,0.12372827796811868,0.0,0.0,0.14277499939784524,0.12228211994974073,0.0692018619439151,0.08751231162692584,0.0,0.0,0.051683864814386624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06762049238160074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23240282860119485,0.049688167343238006,0.0,0.11383016814854845,0.07069597865114652,0.0,0.0,0.07922287078325325,0.0,0.04907777268147285,0.10814233172084743,0.0,0.0585976516497552,0.059071175432261924,0.0,0.08394275654801006,0.0,0.1811659878195943,0.06435627310767278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201511310257677,0.03646273906329189,0.0,0.0495878689397674,0.07527948903982168,0.055583149045585416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04500532766932933,0.0,0.12599869090432114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942918130436013
mentalhealth,ThrowieWTF,2020/01/14,"What am i feeling? It's like a sensation of emptiness when i am not doing anything, an  amplification of sadness when something vaguely bad happens and a forced  state of happiness when something decent happens. I've been feeling like this for a while and i don't know if this thing  has an actual name.",5.774473684210527,7.1896288596491225,6.3218859649122825,75.11861842105263,67.42105263157896,8.50701754385965,37.05701754385965,8.841846274778883,3.471459649122808,243,13,41,4,4,79,40,57,0.196,0.62,0.184,-0.4019,0,0,2,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,8,11,7,0,1,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,3,3,4,10,0,5,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,31,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.2634498593791928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22216069052373552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254120331458439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27300790085302235,0.3857304371363023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4774636845794311,0.2873859939215102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836737208656842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637854911548083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4156691664851784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17935476694545846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gigga2710,2020/01/14,"Psychiatrist, clinical psychologist, therapist, or counselor - Which one should I search for? I’m in the US if that matters. I think I basically understand the technical differences between each but I do not know what would be best for me. I have social and generalized anxiety, and probably undiagnosed depression. Its getting harder to deal with and control.

I saw my university’s therapist for a long time and she was wonderful to talk too but occasionally seemed out of her element with some of my issues. (Anyone had this experience before?) She referred me to the university’s psychiatrist and she prescribed me medication but did not help in any other way. The meds also never helped.

After that, I went outside of the university’s resources and met with a private clinical psychologist. I thought maybe she could help with cognitive behavioral therapy or something along those lines. * I want to work on my issues not just talk about them, * if that makes sense. Long story short, I didn’t like her very much so I stopped going. 

Could someone point me in the direction of which kind of professional help I should seek? Thanks!",4.978831168831167,8.144101212121214,5.787142857142861,70.36500000000002,74.75757575757575,9.832034632034633,31.65079365079365,9.957137785484203,4.137315728715729,912,44,144,30,21,297,127,198,0.094,0.804,0.102,0.4195,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,1,3,5,5,0,0,8,0,12,3,0,2,1,44,27,15,0,8,11,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,10,13,0,2,7,0,0,2,5,1,0,1,8,1,27,4,25,13,4,16,0,1,1,0,17,7,0,7,7,108,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449719153571847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886045480814234,0.0,0.09996261300354004,0.0,0.0,0.09136788672352844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111910136141964,0.0,0.13713068037551332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14655813284213215,0.20865960265281108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13471559921026455,0.11254635314537582,0.0,0.0,0.13652291282446388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278208715034468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826996908859019,0.0,0.07426308480553495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35034286069265164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727722096174609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360732695827083,0.07181311688851412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383903025100919,0.0,0.0,0.23127864937751635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722360672390114,0.0,0.13127613067845778,0.0,0.14514552335910855,0.13163683177340396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605788931408407,0.0,0.10078118365774706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854574638473575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352590609876295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408849536615688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895756097569095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332021698807666,0.11071673287840984,0.10059657328949108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924643074653853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100560765755455,0.0,0.12030388619511387,0.14943316184863575,0.3034371597041797,0.0,0.08372841212288279,0.0,0.103737820569263,0.07619504846460441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603265077819113,0.1571805824751961,0.0,0.0,0.10781688858491392,0.07707287588133704,0.10372020028789714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113290887869008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170663732141112,0.09512971659743344,0.0,0.0,0.09282460951942964,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mascrc,2020/01/14,"Things are rough Do you ever feel like you express how alone you feel, and someone goes and tells you that it’s not true, and then proceeds to ignore you? I feel that from so many people lately. Or if you ask for a little help and they think you really don’t need it that much even though you asked.

The only person I feel really seen with is so far away and even though we have a goal in mind to be in the same place eventually - I can’t help but be scared and pessimistic. I’m not used to good things working out or people really caring like that. So I’m almost prepare myself to have to continue feeling alone. 

Things are most certainly possible but then I guess I almost have a negative thought about being incapable of having that kind of goodness in my life. 

It’s mostly fear based thinking but it really cuts deep. I just don’t see a light at the end of the tunnel right now. Things feel like they will be melancholy forever. But I’m trying. I want to live my life to the fullest and find true fulfillment and love. 

This has been a venting session.",3.74617924528302,5.125040834905661,4.3831603773584895,87.23719339622644,72.25471698113208,7.564150943396226,23.62735849056604,8.07648339933343,1.144032075471698,835,22,171,12,16,266,122,212,0.166,0.698,0.135,-0.82,0,2,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,8,2,2,12,15,1,2,10,0,18,3,0,2,4,47,40,23,0,3,10,0,7,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,14,11,0,1,10,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,3,10,21,11,20,32,4,19,0,0,2,1,19,11,0,8,11,118,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241942773611652,0.23188332837460954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20930765827106126,0.0,0.10517637992927556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413578696733535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915038933754693,0.0,0.0,0.14787775004213566,0.10126101521940592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259696876275358,0.33961771985256606,0.15994761949946973,0.0,0.0,0.1023160593782459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18778896563653175,0.0,0.0,0.12332046910102601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15006927185626906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657389818080655,0.0,0.0,0.12627927712747772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581406806656607,0.16407259049329714,0.11219869096380962,0.09884983125140233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103508608254527,0.0,0.0,0.1134950560233212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303293293914755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229274303985863,0.08300608902514525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513951436293557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521767786045176,0.09774639754923252,0.1169591073085276,0.0,0.0,0.1262016083298305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868603361856913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956007523164438,0.0,0.0,0.1120768654946534,0.0,0.08920598306591168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09485096657896022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978452059899554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974861743531144,0.14346017288459256,0.21997155670130555,0.0888721360898114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760035722495707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966848752461006,0.0,0.0,0.06602829205946167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149757796374303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,panicatdema,2020/01/14,"i always feel sad. but then i feel sudden happiness and i think i got over myself, only to feel more sad the next time. i tried getting help (i see a therapist once every week), but that doesn't help much. my therapist haven't diagnosed me with anything (probably because i can't find the courage to tell her everything and exactly how i feel), and she expects me to feel better immediately. she's from those people who tell you to ""just be happy"" when you're sad.",5.045091575091576,5.832404076923082,6.015109890109893,78.95072344322345,68.67032967032965,9.583150183150185,29.452380952380953,9.725611199111238,2.6635040293040295,365,13,71,8,6,121,63,91,0.133,0.665,0.20199999999999999,0.8445,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,3,7,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,1,1,17,13,8,0,1,3,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,6,16,4,7,11,2,7,0,3,1,0,9,1,0,0,6,44,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396417068166619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810356156242365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230299644927683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14842530254004604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703362351355528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14139763649275838,0.0,0.15082798000002573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4242803188268721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533866618489401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768029373908354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422292918184975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35730019752956466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22497567631136065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12336879690228075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17848105959202493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17872541220335889,0.0,0.12763652137239362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11634694304900525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809409654841638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337327497030491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933684040593956,0.0,0.0,0.3897095553052213,0.0,0.10753383760456904,0.0,0.0,0.09785860928354764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394041469930828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461703149623305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spooki_Cx,2020/01/14,"just need to tell someone. Life was going great had lost of friends and was happy till high school. always had anxiety but it just got worse in grade 9, by grade 10 I cut most friends out of my life (don't know why) still had a small 3-4 friend group. but in grade 11 about half way though I had my first panic attack (didn't know what is was at the time) though I was having a heart attack and got my mom to drive me to the hospital where I stayed for a few days, doctors didn't know what was wrong kept on asking me if I was on drugs and stuff like that (ik they have to ask). got sent home because they said there was nothing wrong with me, which made it worse because I knew something was wrong.

the next day I went to my doctors office to see what he thinks, he told me it was a panic attack, so i went home just thinking is was a one time thing but for the next 2 months it happened every night and missed all of the 2 months of school, and got on meds during this time which had a bad  side effect and I had insomnia for a week, so i got off those meds and on another one (they had to up the dose a few time), and another month goes by and the panic attack go from every night to maybe every other night.

started getting really depressed during this time and didn't leave my room for weeks and never went outside, missing more and more of school. finally I started going back to school but this is when I fully cut all friends out of my life, and I just felt alone and like no ones cared. my anxiety and depression was just getting worse and worse, but I finally make it though grade 11 and 12 (missing a lot of days) and I though it was all over.

I started feeling better and was coming out of my depression still very anxious but not as sad. I took 5ish months off from everything and to just get myself together. I didnt want to go to collage or anything so my parents started pressuring me into getting a job, so i did, I got a job only worked there for a month but is was bad the depression came back but worse so I quit.

know in the present time I still don't work or have any friends and the depression and anxiety is just getting worse and I don't know what to do, I can't go outside, I hate leaving my room, I just sit here all day and do nothing. and i just feel like I'm not meant to be here, im useless. and still have panic attack (not as bad not with the meds)

​

sorry for this just felt like I needed to share this is someone. thanks.",3.4990977443609026,4.152645448343083,4.180476747424116,91.19659649122808,72.09941520467838,7.188393205235312,24.9885268727374,7.110495986334442,0.8031986521860199,1917,53,432,17,35,611,204,513,0.242,0.654,0.10400000000000001,-0.9982,3,1,2,0,0,0,50.0,0,0,3,7,32,45,8,5,23,0,43,9,1,3,5,86,103,50,0,4,25,2,4,4,5,0,8,1,4,0,22,34,0,1,14,0,0,13,14,30,0,5,47,6,47,15,55,55,10,77,0,11,1,0,20,22,0,5,43,279,69,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050153693234430204,0.0,0.0,0.040293477197446914,0.05246846460087995,0.05884167238901369,0.032930658889892266,0.10155566434421984,0.11113497171500816,0.05470646359061301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03984964689673754,0.0,0.09054167160810173,0.2754521277965959,0.0,0.07447166802031678,0.12129855069267373,0.05903885806940853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04282797510684616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05538529661714939,0.049372512347091266,0.0,0.0,0.04171384753683551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249204692481619,0.0,0.20854189710900067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913007384635666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056157623225090714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224004469368325,0.0,0.043521265325459836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0489702675273695,0.03459482791705585,0.09299118338072113,0.10609443561581744,0.0,0.041190278168064025,0.0,0.0,0.18706516487303207,0.0,0.1265003127281907,0.0,0.1376052102773014,0.0,0.2323793654340273,0.053388730741114936,0.0,0.0,0.04282206539701223,0.05154931033857491,0.0,0.04780965961075776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738385524002927,0.0,0.05116366861595493,0.0971484417275322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052307307112544894,0.0,0.0961086759139122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306556111948506,0.0,0.0,0.10255016075055252,0.0,0.0,0.10261202357561973,0.09463203102421512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05286160518519068,0.0411692012126708,0.0,0.04582090353809347,0.03232406188301108,0.0,0.04864941878916757,0.0,0.16136776689204133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05671477185027421,0.1932618551677958,0.0,0.0,0.07181304416730598,0.03734834340785696,0.0,0.1030010685029714,0.13633073937088572,0.0,0.09293018233460076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844209474199524,0.03682939274175601,0.0,0.22726520344992346,0.0537702290540711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05150594563263422,0.0,0.0,0.03102229341589445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04606326187167541,0.0,0.0,0.1960347311835288,0.03858845343237188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206068653810562,0.03727992893622612,0.0,0.05420782013106324,0.13710184999850505,0.05161460422476969,0.15468906234847574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05543503660207382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0423255822665446,0.04458323162956288,0.0,0.0,0.032171416622688104,0.06205756621354424,0.19030925685652453,0.0,0.169422032928203,0.0,0.0,0.04627216035542087,0.05380195405166397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039955694445016364,0.028562318196448742,0.03843750904771506,0.07768722414862736,0.0,0.0,0.13467137360157982,0.043696028251675074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050794989348072,0.0,0.2960952573281786,0.0,0.15883539877363084,0.05884167238901369,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway372840221,2020/01/14,"Can somebody help me figure out what is going on Hey reddit, so predicament. I have a bad habit of throwing in the towel on jobs. Some background, I started working for Aaron's. Felt fine the first day, besides the obvious anxiousness and then the second day I went on break and had a very bad panic attack. I messaged my boss and told him I wasn't feeling well and asked if I could have the rest of the day off. He obliged. Enter in hysteria and tons of crying. And I ended up quitting my job before the day was over. And I can't figure out what is freaking me out so much... it gets to the point (if I don't quit after the breakdown) that I get worse. I can't sleep, can't keep food down, and overall in a major daze.

Is it the new job? Growing older? Just a shit ton of stress? Is something wrong with me mentally? I really want to get to the root of this problem because it isn't the first time its happened... and I'm running out of options personally. And I really have no clue what to do from here, well besides cry some more. 

Thanks for the help before hand.",1.6066229794670157,3.627746669724772,3.073250327653998,91.51851681957187,80.0091743119266,5.436784622105724,22.766273481869806,6.42735559955562,0.4784016601135872,826,27,174,7,21,270,127,218,0.228,0.701,0.071,-0.9885,4,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,5,6,14,2,2,17,0,18,4,3,2,1,32,33,15,0,5,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,15,1,1,4,0,0,6,7,10,2,3,6,3,19,4,29,26,8,35,0,0,0,0,9,15,1,5,13,122,28,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502639834744576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173739824499383,0.13597409261123078,0.0,0.0,0.1995925813247311,0.0728598034348736,0.0,0.2034096795773612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542898642784027,0.0,0.2625796962884637,0.30832848507039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058614541968474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060434164597199184,0.0,0.11476033859479938,0.0,0.0,0.20333154596077552,0.14452707508883536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18733671120109494,0.0,0.06792738816615851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569334738262058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16022681761624347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35582290026212393,0.10623708506502468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12045056272211285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786278607932757,0.0,0.0,0.11543557022604868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023389503470007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436243222240606,0.0,0.0,0.11298739062778253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436688561489733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542537709729529,0.0,0.0,0.15313834137670934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268812328146035,0.0,0.0,0.1196088124711504,0.0,0.0,0.09201425580305787,0.0,0.0,0.08459863696639312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13691261391733353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004025481666753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969452786599954,0.0,0.0,0.11420886576225378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986185755810276,0.0704974641274737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21493015371837607,0.11079855008238797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701379968757904,0.0,0.12180363324759645,0.0,0.13067908505887366,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Type1ASugarnova,2020/01/14,5000$ for inpatient or 500$ to shoot myself I have no future. I lost my job. With a dwindling savings account I cant even afford to go to a hospital but I can still afford to buy a gun.,-1.7814285714285705,0.13193085714285854,2.030476190476193,92.97285714285721,97.57142857142857,4.704761904761905,18.904761904761905,6.42735559955562,0.19159047619047653,144,5,33,2,6,53,32,42,0.223,0.777,0.0,-0.7227,3,0,0,2,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,6,1,6,4,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,23,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3494031660666113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30064603593500705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5249563656465395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5774720310394582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.422464502832527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soliloquy1985,2020/01/14,"Advice for throwing in the towel and getting on disability? I'm going to try to keep this as short and to the point as possible.  
   

I've had anxiety issues, depression, and (contamination-based) OCD for most of my life. I've recently been diagnosed with PTSD as well.  
   
Over the course of my adult life I've struggled to work and, because of my mental health problems, have either lost or had to quit every almost every job I've ever had.  
   

Over the last couple of years I've gone downhill mentally. I'm barely able to survive, much less work a job. I'm on the edge of needing to leave my part-time (10-15 hours a week) job due to OCD complications and I'm so, so sick of struggling.  
   

My new therapist has been pretty effective at helping me realize a few things and it's become obvious to me that it's time to throw in the towel on working. I was determined to lead a normal life but realize now that it's never going to happen and I need to accept that.  
   

Do you folks have any suggestions or tips for the process of applying for disability? Any info on where I should get started?  
   

I really don't know the first bit of how to go about this and I'd be really thankful for any advice you folks have.",5.12875,5.8020150607287455,6.62576670040486,75.05500632591095,68.43319838056682,10.385526315789477,30.822115384615394,10.411451182825502,3.2759475708502017,988,38,186,26,16,339,136,247,0.062,0.862,0.077,0.7652,5,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,2,0,9,8,8,0,2,12,0,14,6,0,3,3,32,32,17,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,9,9,0,1,6,0,0,7,2,5,1,1,8,0,13,3,41,22,6,32,0,2,0,0,5,12,0,4,13,114,22,7,0.08999390960685484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17588201383489932,0.0,0.0,0.09011590087795568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5850501807598135,0.0,0.18359683366595145,0.0,0.06884509452508128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05485945200306908,0.09939120269838232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825004107244846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957654926846746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751162247501654,0.09134192389404253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140464348795919,0.1516475004985393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765487735381807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403620681588068,0.0,0.15343683822010906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958131705589111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956593176071512,0.0,0.0,0.06032102061927599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862587307013896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393026047780656,0.2679152069902464,0.0799907218289464,0.0,0.0,0.049458299175866666,0.07335704765669804,0.0,0.09529055617891488,0.0,0.0,0.19069607937424995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823898318130897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18138538818054595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615587839299197,0.13345868732958951,0.06940885103735195,0.08691667868584628,0.0,0.0,0.0881749238984888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745463426175344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507333318072112,0.10145461124833846,0.0,0.09155615946468676,0.0,0.08611201755079008,0.10519806443569868,0.0,0.0,0.09571960043618406,0.0,0.0,0.1153048058398151,0.0,0.08885812879061855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06369815241584258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18816234818745506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285430090291783,0.0,0.10448986533353544,0.059787954706312235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05247617240360725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06109995726768054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218768593767262,0.0,0.08091533257061942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19654991404824215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05795312722058772
mentalhealth,Masta_Chase,2020/01/14,"What are my options? I'm discovering that a lot of jobs offer limited mental health services that are not optimal. The health benefits with my current job offer only 6 covered visits with a mental health professional. As you all know, most issues that warrant seeking mental health services can not be fixed in 6 sessions. Usually you spend the first 2 or 3 sessions just catching them up on everything up to that point.

So what are my options, if any? I need help, it's not optional. And I cant afford $100+ per session after these 6 sessions run out. Is there a way around this? Organizations that offer cheap health care services? Something? I've gone untreated for the last 5 years because I've had shit insurance. I need help. Any info or advice would be appreciated.",3.82291625615764,6.4028235724137925,5.050665024630543,77.29905172413797,75.34482758620689,7.453201970443351,29.66748768472907,8.418075326091056,2.6172660098522167,618,28,104,12,14,204,101,145,0.054000000000000006,0.836,0.11,0.8338,4,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,1,2,4,3,1,0,6,0,10,6,1,0,1,24,16,6,0,4,7,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,10,5,0,1,2,0,2,4,4,1,0,1,2,0,9,2,13,11,3,18,0,0,0,0,9,7,1,8,6,62,19,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561000386869678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17482628256848434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144298594677248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783581655462347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105739583847115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552549031841908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933797641526616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6831720306540482,0.0,0.0,0.17231832790960566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341647178668345,0.2551167073332657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064346166346966,0.10477909411025466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928202846458017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38862107865908296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19062490662083373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776217724377556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151397947926992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194677752924136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895810788556933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157113354115533,0.0,0.0,0.10203085884909377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131272987624878,0.0,0.0,0.0827769977800501
mentalhealth,Boarmann,2020/01/14,"I experience a very weird phenomena i cant explain. Hello r/mentalhealth community. this is acctually my first post on Reddit. 

I have a very weird phaenomena happen to me every day, since i can think. 

i have watched a lot of Reddit AMAs recently on youtube thats why i thought i might ask this community on what it thinks.

​

So what happens to me is that i think about memories in great detail, usually also involving other people. i can think about it for multiple minutes, and then i recognize that i don't know any of the people involved and that its not a memory from anything i have ever experienced. In the moment when i recognize that fact the memory immediately deletes itself, like the feeling when you wake up from a dream and can remember that you have dreamed something...but you cant tell what the hell it was. thats what i feel like, with the diffrence that i was thinking about it while fully awake. An example would be my brain telling me: hey do you  you remember frank and Rosies wedding, then remembering great detail about the wedding, going through how they met, how they became a couple, and thinking about how sad it was when their romance suddenly came to an end. then i remember wait...who the fucking hell are Frank and Rosie, and in that moment everything vanishes and only the scent of it stays for a second remembering me that there was something wich i cannot remember anymore. 

i have never talked to anybody about this. has anybody ever heard of similar things ? 

side-note, i also suffer from Kartaplexia and sleep paralysis, yet i only have this condition since a year.",7.173482475764357,7.7861669597315455,7.418344519015663,71.36399701715142,63.96644295302014,10.91752423564504,35.34750186428039,10.746095033038511,3.972216405667412,1286,56,222,32,18,418,158,298,0.069,0.86,0.071,-0.1245,0,0,2,0,0,0,39.0,0,5,3,1,19,12,3,0,19,0,25,4,3,3,4,39,44,22,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,28,11,0,0,17,2,0,2,6,7,0,2,8,6,34,5,28,33,1,31,2,2,1,1,21,7,3,2,22,165,62,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468953897603542,0.0,0.09951304572917627,0.11160063630165623,0.06245713856751195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108466955704304,0.0,0.0,0.07557987000557402,0.0,0.08586183696884833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252839207184647,0.0,0.10504518470117273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162375153567912,0.0,0.05923184746954654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134661325839622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16615649617194705,0.07738261681533525,0.0,0.0825435563908509,0.08984115488208598,0.0,0.0,0.0928782747673426,0.06561344454598785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812254591622454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490839198811187,0.0,0.0,0.0521971194966828,0.0,0.0,0.20251689254021535,0.0,0.0,0.16243487147894115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05047511631754413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974077764989152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808257081800445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743207781184314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07083583317573802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970315586580714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273462716197226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796126129378397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068497019109624,0.0,0.6242487791618851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15194877989548594,0.0,0.0919104303280624,0.0,0.0,0.07070607652103647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789359207638602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382080988642767,0.16055158601054342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610171400649725,0.3530999508805661,0.0,0.07291395759762036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115330229338906,0.15156200505174391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287501627252485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524341465219433,0.0,0.11160063630165623,0.05914459021372806
mentalhealth,throwawayacc6732,2020/01/14,"[UK] Stressed. Paranoid. Worried 3 months ago a Snapchat account I was using got deleted. I was using this account for sexual purposes. I am worried that I MAY have been talking to someone underage. My account was deleted on a random day, and I haven't been able to find out why.

This is causing me severe anxiety, confusion and paranoia. I cannot stop trembling, I cannot concentrate on anything. I don't sleep much, I don't eat much. I cannot face myself, because what I was doing in that account I feel extremely bad about. It's totally ruined my life.  

It's been 3 months and I have no idea what's going to happen. Does anybody have any advice as my mental health is affecting me in my exams and everyday life. My life is hell right now.",1.9402397260273965,4.4358854041095945,3.7290239726027385,84.5799743150685,81.94520547945207,6.389726027397263,28.30308219178082,7.645422480735847,2.066932876712329,583,28,107,10,16,195,87,146,0.221,0.75,0.027999999999999997,-0.9758,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,3,2,0,22,7,2,4,1,17,28,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,8,5,1,1,3,0,4,1,7,6,0,0,8,1,21,0,11,19,3,14,1,1,0,0,1,6,1,3,7,73,29,1,0.1609986765586944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732604340449655,0.14271561266500565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094846209397761,0.0,0.12316354689464493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324881928315254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442717000729731,0.09814329889449076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653899899523217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038308272921616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14089102680744905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16474183948321006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140576833704248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471498736376956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149925810426328,0.0,0.12876534915299115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423705979745589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113406454436406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817479090085022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3411543796497916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224879867830838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25701521522435894,0.0,0.23670510403158096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374919900993016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188267805999925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16111494787745406,0.0,0.13641365618772885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460210264659028,0.1844234400402372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940463769640118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27810232844375943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452762638520059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3270039422141805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Poised07,2020/01/14,What’s wrong???What should I do??? I was on life support 4 month coma I got out wasn’t myself I wasn’t okay then back I went my lungs collapsed the first time was from dabbing and vaping I’m only 19 woke up 2 or 3 months later it’s worse I see things I can’t sleep when I do I’m not sleeping I’m somewhere trapped in my head I don’t know if I’m dreaming anymore it’s so hard I have to ask people what Time it is I fade in and out of reality I’m so trapped so scared of the dark I don’t have anyone to talked to idk what to do anymore I’ve done research I think I’m going deep into some psychosis I don’t know it’s been so long I only have my dad he doesn’t understand why I never go outside anymore does anyone have any advice or incite they could give me???,-1.945487047741384,-0.09390031213872696,0.8915478484264592,100.08292656818668,101.25433526011558,3.256604581460073,16.23399700278313,5.033348758259628,-0.9343751230999788,598,17,145,3,27,205,99,173,0.134,0.836,0.03,-0.9403,0,2,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,6,3,0,1,2,1,21,6,4,0,1,17,40,11,0,3,4,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,4,1,0,3,9,1,0,1,9,2,22,2,14,29,1,23,0,0,1,0,6,8,0,4,12,83,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14602861694202993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162263936907066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4446056001960908,0.2089803799106469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970391045724148,0.0,0.0,0.1149082301654876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931370144943942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13077378251569385,0.15292646857247694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711147984560014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14335408796603955,0.169857575046669,0.0,0.11951883769506567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386666716245466,0.0,0.1533660102650737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16425390788933214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105552141158407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322475044169112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23855920863512034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525542947255832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273079387382755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360116179368477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14961302907623386,0.0,0.11908235726712887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29909088791791755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957992901428165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011221956497665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927964941032658,0.0957535300542822,0.0,0.0,0.17427644160826072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556973056572904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853008001459902,0.13484412005626972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228960168983782,0.0,0.16338647117655675,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Renneth,2020/01/14,"Written safety plan: are ""reasons to live"" actually helpful when considering suicide? I'm working on my safety plan, and I've noticed that most templates have a section called ""reasons to live"". I've come up with a few compelling reasons that resonate with non-depressed me, but I'm having doubts that these would be persuasive if I'm already so far gone as to be considering suicide. Also, because I'm sharing this document with some key loved ones, I don't want to make them feel bad that they aren't listed as a reason. (The reason they aren't listed is because I know they're wonderful, strong people, and in the past depressed-me has always rationalized any sadness I would cause them away by being confident that they would grow from the experience and come out just fine. Also, there's the bit about feeling like a burden to them, and that classic depressed mindset: ""They'll be better off without me anyway."")

Those of you who have used a safety plan while severely depressed, did you find your written ""reasons to live"" to be helpful, further polarizing, or just neutral overall?",11.646293969849243,8.774732844221107,10.417782663316583,64.67732726130656,57.24120603015075,12.16105527638191,46.48304020100503,9.827888789773867,4.855758291457286,872,43,140,11,8,275,122,199,0.161,0.635,0.204,0.8088,0,0,0,0,0,2,32.0,0,3,7,6,9,12,0,1,9,0,19,1,0,10,0,38,36,14,2,5,6,0,2,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,10,10,0,0,11,0,0,4,4,6,0,1,4,2,16,6,23,23,5,16,0,3,0,1,16,9,0,6,4,97,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.10166080792864893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496087378156307,0.16661911663886672,0.08668282809676432,0.0,0.0,0.07084329380852204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787683854695084,0.0,0.08698265947245269,0.12700951967938054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921352601496124,0.11373327721531905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637540583160557,0.0,0.0,0.10701751123224737,0.0,0.17947690429255173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691800659867302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190417744688708,0.0,0.0,0.10534909313303184,0.07442339877188124,0.0,0.0,0.09521503241753364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396540354613029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05725243866940656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05089516125354071,0.0,0.27596811128960896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940229623298338,0.0,0.06953832963742722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860513588791413,0.0,0.0,0.07059239501049601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994478379622696,0.0722225636868081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6426620470498127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768929635855488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22790340448319654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997466855921528,0.0,0.0,0.06144573986840545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042200524307053,0.11297449426804562,0.07584141311660142,0.0,0.0,0.22201105426630305,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_lahepoiss_,2020/01/14,"I seriously dont know what to do anymore. Its been so hard for the past year for me, every day it becomes harder and harder to pull myself up from depression, everything is happening too fast for me to keep up, I really cant remember when was I truly happy. It must be a long time ago, I honestly dont remember what being happy feels like. I feel like nobody cares, that nobody gives a damn shit what it feels like being behind a fake personality mask for entire middle school since 1st to 9th grade, it has destroyed me inside, ive been sad for 7 years, and severly depressed for 2 years, and the worst thing is that I myself understand completely what is the cause of this, what is the reason im going through this, what do i seek from life. I know exactly what is wrong with me and with that knowledge comes the fact that I know how hard it is for me to get the solution what is so close and yet so far away, I am losing my soulmate, the only person who understands what im feeling and what is going on with me and understands that im not really fine even if I seem like it, im losing her to my own fucking problems which I cant easily overcome, I am pushing her away just because I think shes so much better than me, so much stronger, so much better in life than me, and that makes me think that I shouldn't consern her with my problems anymore, to just let her go even after she told me that she wants to stay close to me because she thinks im an awesome person and the only person she feels like herself when talking go, I still am too afraid to keep her in my life. When I go to a therapist it doesnt do shit, I know exactly what I have to do, going to the therapist just makes me feel weaker, that im a week fucking person who cant keep he's shit together, whether I go to the therapist or not the end solution is still the same, that im too weak and afraid to make steps closer to my goals. I just feel like im born into the wrong world where I dont belong, full of evil, greed and sadness, I just want to BE happy ana MAKE others happy and just live in harmony, I want a world full of happy people, intelligent people, creative people, understanding people, a world full of romantic lovers and deep thinkers and philosophers, artists and musicians and people who love their life and what they are doing. I dont want a world full of evilness and money, I JUST WANT TO BE GODDAMN HAPPY, I JUST WANT EVERYONE TO BE HAPPY IS THIS TOO FUCKING MUCH TO ASK, IS IT TOO MUCH TO ASK FOR THE WHOLE WORLD TO BE HAPPY AND UNDERSTANDING, IM TIRED OF LIVING IN THIS FUCKING SHITHOLE FULL OF EVILNESS AND SADNESS, ITS FUCKING DEPRESSING AND SAD AND SO GODDAMN BORING, IS IT REALLY SO FUCKING MUCH TO ASK TO STOP DESTROYING OUR FUCKING PLANET WITHING THE PEOPLE IN IT WITHIN THE EMOTIONS WHICH THOSE PEOPLE CARRY WITH THEM, WHY CANT WE JUST BEHAVE LIKE EMOTIONAL AND SOCIAL CREATURES LIKE WE ARE, WHY DO WE HAVE TO ACT LIKE A HUGE PACK OF FUCKING APES, DESTROYING EACHOTHERS EMOTIONS, STEALING, ONLY WANTING AND WANTING AND FUCKING THINKING ONLY OF THEMSELVES AND SURVIVAL, WHY CANT ANYONE BE HAPPY WITH WHAT THEY GOT, WHAT ABOUT OTHER FUCKING CREATURES, WHAT ABOUT OTHER PEOPLE, WHAT ABOUT YOU AND YOUR EMOTIONS, WHAT THE FUCK ARE EACH PERSON THINKING, THAT WE ARE FUCKING GOD? THAT WE HAVE A RIGHT TO ONLY THINK ABOUT OURSELVES? WELL THATS NOT THE CASE BECAUSE WE ARE IN THIS SHIT TOGETHER, IN ORDER TO TRULY BE HAPPY WE SHOULD JUST STOP THINKING WHAT WE COULD HAVE AND WHAT WE COULD GET AND ACHIEVE, IM NOT TALKING ABOUT OTHERS, IM TALKING ABOUT MY FUCKING SELF AS WELL, IN MY MIND MANKIND IS A HUGE FAILURE FULL OF CLOWNS. Im extremely disappointed and sad right now, please dont take any of this as an insult to yourself or nothing like that. Its just that im 15 and im starting to see a bigger picture, im alone and im in dark and I need people in my life who understand me even a little bit besides my dad and by my some other family members. Please try to be happy anyone besides me who also cant feel happyness anymore and who are overall even a little bit sad. Please be safe and keep your family and friends close and never let them go. I want no one to be in the same situation as me, its so dark and sad and I would never put someone in the same situation. Might delete this post later.",5.436043891930709,5.655761319719954,6.093509334889152,80.72918959249623,67.65810968494749,8.692657750650751,30.01635849564671,8.44344225975766,2.1338751638093525,3389,116,660,45,52,1108,306,857,0.16399999999999998,0.6709999999999999,0.165,-0.799,0,1,0,0,0,0,74.0,10,3,5,7,48,84,26,2,36,0,71,26,4,7,6,154,151,61,0,19,19,1,10,10,2,5,7,0,0,7,70,62,0,7,31,1,2,14,20,51,2,1,5,11,87,33,93,125,22,88,0,13,1,15,57,45,18,6,36,468,157,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026259336747446748,0.0,0.0,0.030680885107082563,0.0,0.023689804253460758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02014491250282877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813529120897724,0.04142670859805672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308157719393107,0.0,0.05566427653437638,0.0,0.0,0.054174407839143526,0.032716693015841736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052398940093212734,0.0646821116012807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030203007616779583,0.030431368788004894,0.0,0.025517916650122624,0.03105954766021245,0.0,0.0,0.04730371285395147,0.0,0.0,0.019104627781900762,0.0,0.07654371480051153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17359188880833235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328924978708298,0.026237519746769963,0.0,0.0,0.07826384571480775,0.0,0.024958973157244883,0.0283064066465712,0.02662358153613768,0.0,0.05585256771555496,0.0,0.1198277578201476,0.10581473388821526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022886947942916163,0.3560223565413175,0.03095398412780698,0.028417442972629763,0.13468518465971865,0.0,0.02369252110312424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026195854856642525,0.3468809976764697,0.05307345516266356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5119732968910575,0.0,0.0,0.10532247599961178,0.0,0.0,0.06512093413872433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060583820999558474,0.1046193378426216,0.14472485893175724,0.059380813114163176,0.05231597004816591,0.026215756860247155,0.0,0.06628196402621311,0.0,0.0,0.02673625473302625,0.0,0.07909533793982472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03142572214330268,0.02991116656062526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306595456629143,0.021965359031370563,0.04569474984345455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02842442962137434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020073567227057703,0.11264956720053937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028278865742185758,0.18483408000760385,0.15519594343553988,0.0,0.09755271815883376,0.0,0.0,0.028371006950412163,0.0,0.0,0.05669114301259641,0.0,0.029779676380728513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05693248245562079,0.03045776579713916,0.0,0.0,0.06711502386350204,0.05059640498575205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029980439507846308,0.02360599648533656,0.02696801026484989,0.030903643311078314,0.03346598457252102,0.12163188506009877,0.02450476395582406,0.0665958348755414,0.0,0.03019730276227553,0.02509979159177408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02096757903805241,0.03157457885834373,0.047314535013922125,0.04953294000997403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02227309317635804,0.07143044607027135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031850733638289,0.01968045568487024,0.13287024896514432,0.0,0.0,0.017273629622787005,0.03404771461731527,0.0,0.0283064066465712,0.0,0.020112328766902908,0.0,0.0,0.18503388397265466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572537198792036,0.0,0.02376208654516333,0.0,0.05326994792529627,0.0,0.08019147161261139,0.03307344302414904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02104359741254455,0.06477702579725449,0.0,0.05722945153419046
mentalhealth,ThiccBenedict,2020/01/14,"M(17) Mental health is effecting relationships and I feel like I'm on a downward spiral I'll start at the beginning, I played transports from ages 7 to 16 ish. I was bullied all through those years and it made me have outbursts of emotion. When I was 12 I started self harming by burning, this continued to about 3 weeks ago. Things were on the up when I was 15/16. Went into a new class and I'm getting called names and just physically abused. My parents want me to start team sports again even though they know how much it effects  me. I'm 6,1 and 200 pounds and fairly well built yet I dont have the confidence to stand up for myself. Every day it all gets worse and I have no idea how to cope or fix it or get over anything. All my relationships, school life etc is being effected. I'm at my lowest point and I cant see a way out.",2.33877192982456,4.1604419415204665,3.3472280701754364,91.36926315789476,76.953216374269,6.431345029239767,23.68070175438596,7.3011,0.7945887719298246,656,21,143,8,15,210,117,171,0.128,0.823,0.049,-0.9359999999999999,2,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,1,4,11,4,0,0,6,0,12,2,0,6,3,27,29,15,0,1,3,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,10,0,0,6,3,0,2,3,1,1,0,6,2,17,3,20,22,5,30,0,0,1,0,8,11,0,2,16,88,24,3,0.0,0.188407520160512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14095776231805374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085631520169247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16237273813848194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255192688055596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863651351008788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17887118181751252,0.0,0.0,0.17734446231121986,0.10502832448193268,0.0,0.1339775273015487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040308085637382,0.11360079847114506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492373120148476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902617971580833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17950929181068867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739083211182458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231744273911486,0.07768700505659208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15046443477264512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602503550481874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689478526736932,0.0,0.0,0.15357828718983824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17656803985740654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15032116957263794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34144655524600304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093230788659155,0.12671486998560305,0.0,0.1658879830248737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3376562459504815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564291937071342,0.0,0.1562320499699085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379153904401408,0.12621920622156113,0.12755274741430128,0.0,0.1429741491677072,0.1474090829321415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620505129487713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240085275234992
mentalhealth,myaccount123123123,2020/01/14,"Keep getting angry and trashing my apartment and losing thousands of dollars in doing so I don't know what to do this is the second time in the past few months that I've gotten so infuriated that I take a knife and cut holes in the wall destroy all the appliances and pour every condiment, food, oil, on the rug and pour out every edible thing i have and basically trash my apartment. the triggor is always something small like last time I drove to the store and realized I forgot my wallet to pay for it, so I furiously drove home almost crashing the car and then destroyed my appartment, then this time i tried to make coffee and it didn't work so i did it again. I am 23 and I live in an apartment covered by a trust fund that I have. I can't work because I have extreme executave function defecits and anxiety and it makes me feel like I'm going to die if i try to go apply for a job. I have no idea what to do right now my apartment is totally trashed and the only other option is homelessness and I don't want to willingly become homeless",6.710719517449378,5.813869464454977,7.437828522188712,75.90194743644982,65.25592417061611,9.947608789314954,34.34769495906937,9.095868883498916,2.904569668246445,831,32,161,12,11,278,122,211,0.159,0.802,0.039,-0.9741,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,6,8,4,0,13,0,18,1,0,2,2,29,33,21,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,13,15,1,2,4,0,4,5,5,5,0,2,6,2,22,3,18,26,3,28,0,1,0,0,0,13,0,3,12,113,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737908425888147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14441214520137532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276954310010433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579787023919388,0.19167850173590129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18012329039150987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924561218538053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775491564129356,0.1239881405095268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098640953645521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067562692693287,0.0,0.1972712705796517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17409039686617891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19592312373968632,0.0,0.0,0.17222713236165224,0.15426417325358766,0.0,0.0,0.0953816074970424,0.1414709612607781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16958097880214612,0.0,0.15325275618225148,0.0,0.0,0.19416429940681404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23169939368962736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853040755761478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13199683874981996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567843863767762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821551640619446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336115640815522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049219635374554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530261500846475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30360496191043673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23566569167569226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236757732427207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25270105749309224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AugieKS,2020/01/14,"I'm having a hard time. Today is not a good day, I think it's the worst day I've had since we'll I don't know when. I can't remember ever feeling this bad.

I lost my beloved cat Bandit today. I loved him so much. He has been sick and was old, but he was getting better, we thought we were out of the woods. My girlfriend found him, cold and stiff, in the laundry room. When she woke me, I couldn't believe it, he had been so much better recently. But he is gone.

I have OCD, pretty severe when I was a child, managed well as an adult. Not today. Today I feel like I did when I was a child. The sight of his body won't leave my mind, his poor face. I don't want to see him like that, but it keeps coming back. It feel the death on me, a non-corporeal remnant of him. I feel like if I wash it away then he won't be dead anymore, that he will come back to me and wedge himself in between my arm and side, holding on to me like he used to before he fell asleep.

I feel like any moment he will jump up beside me and this nightmare will be over. But it won't. I know I will come to terms with it all in time, that I will be able to remember all the good times, and that I will honor him in every way I can. Right now, I just wish I could shut off the rumination, force the unwanted thoughts out of my brain, not feel that illogical compulsion to clean myself, oh God does that make me feel guilty.",2.3546733111849387,2.880487966777409,3.720930232558139,93.91457364341088,74.64784053156146,6.796456256921374,21.974529346622372,6.655083550727371,0.16970609080841648,1062,23,263,8,21,350,157,301,0.113,0.716,0.172,0.9721,0,0,0,0,0,1,41.0,3,0,0,4,12,15,0,0,14,0,34,9,5,2,3,52,62,19,2,6,9,0,8,5,1,10,3,0,2,3,15,14,0,3,15,0,1,6,10,3,1,0,16,11,46,12,26,31,6,45,0,1,2,1,26,16,0,1,27,166,61,1,0.10102086632360656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869765325316628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018555427647796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491242931459687,0.15535762111382914,0.08434820373580618,0.0,0.0,0.08596131670300915,0.11381592265768667,0.0,0.1786894937792105,0.0,0.1122114089614104,0.0,0.11277269642353033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26106159401692536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065694161669312,0.0,0.0,0.13030020306194245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08840404088739298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09137915714344726,0.08511443687187642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35755429745437395,0.21650798125952414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076416570219567,0.0,0.0,0.052779233171588516,0.0,0.0,0.16946301953940382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049485370562298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979198761685182,0.0,0.0,0.11103685241512386,0.0,0.0,0.10696651117509673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24676846262328425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102762090354848,0.0,0.09117527597500608,0.0,0.06743221271089024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200227717499373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14852392071541162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060044056678031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277453870812192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974591824644044,0.0,0.22887389740736835,0.08627126787172405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050055124426057,0.0,0.0,0.11412482449928875,0.0,0.08356550454371553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473009209636581,0.0,0.16039856744134964,0.17671823862474628,0.0,0.3830238768596824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724959343302001,0.0,0.0,0.05958472431805802,0.08018566155340019,0.0,0.0,0.09082989094324323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616901074037053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pragmaticseagull,2020/01/14,"How do I help my friend who recently relapsed TW: self harm 

Hi guys, my close friend has been clean for around half a year and she has made tremendous progress (got off meds and therapy) but today she relapsed self harming again. I don’t know how to help her and I tried to ask her about her day and hopefully distract her before it’s too late but I think she already did it. What should I do? How can I help her?",0.718,3.061773329411768,1.468529411764706,99.6733823529412,86.29411764705883,4.811764705882354,20.264705882352946,6.2581,-0.0918000000000001,323,10,74,3,10,99,57,85,0.10400000000000001,0.679,0.217,0.8343,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,1,1,0,9,0,0,4,0,16,15,9,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,4,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,4,0,16,3,6,10,0,9,0,0,0,0,19,3,0,1,6,48,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21816215379647808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17599111340748205,0.18481882035578634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16822450503997086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274973907300308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054784608010337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811533493085367,0.0,0.0,0.1957498541323004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3975338412158159,0.0,0.0,0.19635646699417825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086484028814127,0.0,0.2230093941795216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18706447957360084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21959538844185966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952006829390208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4124795239347019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22608229632448498,0.0,0.0,0.12667544102103873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18739243584944773,0.0,0.0,0.13422242341271795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273095682508343
mentalhealth,SuddenlyClean,2020/01/14,"I'm normally a very calm person but people can get me so flustered that I start seething with rage I am someone who has dealt with social anxiety for many years and try to avoid conflict as much as I can, often to my own detriment. Anyways, I deal with a certain person in my life nearly everyday who often gets me annoyed, and then they start complaining that my tone is horrible or that I'm angry or something, which in my mind is definitely not the case. However I am constantly badgered about how I need to change my voice or chill when most of the time I'm already 99% ""chill"" with only very mild annoyance. The badgering actually causes me to get upset more than anything, since I feel like I'm calm and just talking normally. It gets to the point where I just want to start hitting a pillow to calm down and I'll be in a relatively negative mood for the next few hours if not the rest of the day. Is it the normal for someone to feel calm but actually sound angry even when they aren't at the time?",8.4126368159204,6.189025487562192,8.559800995024876,73.47114427860699,62.78109452736317,11.918407960199005,37.25870646766169,10.504223727775694,3.66853631840796,797,30,158,15,9,263,118,201,0.203,0.698,0.099,-0.9805,1,1,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,0,12,13,3,2,13,0,10,1,0,2,1,34,26,17,0,6,10,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,1,2,8,8,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,4,18,6,27,24,6,22,0,0,0,0,10,8,0,7,15,107,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.2688127347717428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519904646767144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053644489429011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133415347405966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414884971354784,0.1457019803373718,0.0,0.0,0.14883914417213584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882561583162568,0.14199543657686878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909705539978529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928267150251875,0.09839562444220702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287836720399194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563807766603786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728404256660364,0.06728879969562793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396384259229939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13906985366691754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124871959717813,0.10212638347095464,0.0,0.0,0.14647933034764068,0.0,0.4048437582039421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475123927024213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548588710067744,0.24052418795429045,0.0,0.0,0.1302010685315698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393316708566285,0.0,0.0,0.1404002237015218,0.2333994119997426,0.10603266753157037,0.0,0.0,0.29246182785896563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070360252940964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062503875056522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351085029883424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22728631657688494,0.0812377833239924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869476258603277
mentalhealth,bodmon_tings,2020/01/14,I think psychedelics made me go insane I want to be free from myself. Soon enough hopefully,1.9056862745098044,4.572556823529414,1.1964705882352966,96.57745098039216,98.41176470588236,4.6196078431372545,17.43137254901961,6.42735559955562,0.04364313725490199,74,2,14,1,3,21,16,17,0.129,0.524,0.348,0.5574,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,3,2,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5146472679530534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830689577217904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4947034052988124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4712930338996893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31914799140633715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937790518866911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gowiththeshittyflow,2020/01/14,"Hello everyone, just looking for advice here :) How do you know when it’s time to check yourself into a hospital? I feel like I’m probably at that point already but I need helping knowing other options before I do that. Please, no negative comments. I’m not in a good space right now and I really just need help",1.3769262295082,4.031082983606556,3.4394877049180335,83.98414959016395,88.01639344262293,6.328688524590166,25.6577868852459,7.645422480735847,1.9661295081967207,246,11,44,5,8,83,50,61,0.158,0.648,0.19399999999999998,0.1246,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,13,10,4,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,5,10,0,9,0,0,1,0,5,6,0,1,4,29,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430216891740814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744409060380742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21162096531209384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376385476839167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12574756792756525,0.1776676213178159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20859340663389045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.333389776566051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733523263084504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149972166978848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20884100426192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688080995051337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729922187502596,0.23509697987260494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681350670590905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593202629086635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123840081322693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501594314113395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DriftingShadow,2020/01/14,"I think I have developed PTSD or Fear when playing a Ranked game Yes I know, very crazy, a gamer who thinks develops PTSD on a game he plays every single day. For like 1 month ago ( since the season restarted ) I have this like fear or trauma going on my head whenever I see the ""Ranked Match"". I didnt really try to care, but recently, I've been scared to the point i almost cried when I was talking about rank with my friends. Like I don't know, maybe being stuck in the lowest rank for like 1 year in that game might have brain damaged me to saying im never gonna get good and maybe thats what making me cry? Since its always a goal of mine to catch up to my friends skills. My friends always makes fun of my rank, I normally tend to laugh it off at first, but when im alone I just feel bad for myself. I think maybe stop playing the game for awhile might help, but I tried it before, failed badly since i can say I am addicted to that game.  I don't really know, maybe i just need to take a break and get some fresh air. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk.",4.52470588235294,4.248803823529413,4.8689592760180975,90.4333936651584,69.58823529411765,8.247963800904976,23.78733031674207,7.61054688173877,0.7220606334841628,819,15,191,8,13,259,130,221,0.196,0.605,0.19899999999999998,-0.0217,1,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,9,6,23,0,3,10,1,13,3,2,2,1,28,34,10,0,2,7,0,1,4,3,3,1,2,0,0,9,4,0,1,7,8,0,3,4,8,0,1,4,4,27,15,25,26,2,25,0,2,1,0,14,9,0,6,16,100,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933167837497274,0.0,0.0,0.08890166404124031,0.0,0.1004266600298582,0.1038709304241264,0.0,0.0,0.1668998112246272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167477108955912,0.0,0.0,0.08534000823868239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119576015236352,0.0,0.0,0.1022530638152176,0.0,0.0,0.08639156711687143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203292733278776,0.064679211704181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844992494585937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22570986453964365,0.05070999684320698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530722748067228,0.0,0.0,0.23245306344018676,0.0,0.10479551422545927,0.0,0.056997522219953585,0.08411909006472014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292720328154237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06722274949667596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166623555463588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16535145568981818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19598790191710375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338896566273399,0.0,0.4030219964542735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21278519096708784,0.0,0.0,0.08005108863245522,0.0,0.0,0.07436429137312467,0.07735037899284156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826360297395982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480713864823713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344689483200269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849759502006558,0.0,0.09902497787854599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15951039740651124,0.10040849749355267,0.0,0.07991871192642147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488845373623979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384752505544127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540613328386353,0.08060987449822839,0.0,0.09233421213929567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19278671400113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13618161892805833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275033980741496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458392967664149
mentalhealth,vivikuku,2020/01/14,"Is DEATH really an option or solution to one's problem? I'm not really depressive or anything the like, but my friend is and I'm just here to ask a question just to try and help her get through it all as it's been very difficult in her life. I can't afford to get or help her seek a therapist because of the costs as I'm still in school and don't have any income source. I'm afraid to have her die as she keeps telling me that if she does it right nothing important will be lost and that her family will only have to worry about the cost of her burial and corpse.  


It's been a few years and she still is saying those things even tho she hasnt done it yet, I'm afraid that in July she'll actually do it. The things I've gathered from her telling me is that her family verbally abuses her regularly and that her school constantly gives her heavy work alongside her other classmates such as giving her a summative test as an assignment (which the teacher didnt teach them a single thing about) and stems to 77 items. Multiple choice even.   


How can I help her through this and have an answer to the question of death being an option or solution?",5.266492949110977,5.360409042918455,5.789984671980381,83.19400214592275,68.01287553648068,9.575597792765176,28.230839975475174,9.424239791934726,2.141891722869406,909,27,191,17,14,294,126,233,0.14800000000000002,0.7509999999999999,0.10099999999999999,-0.9428,2,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,1,2,13,8,0,2,15,0,22,1,0,1,1,27,34,22,4,2,9,0,0,1,1,3,1,1,0,0,18,9,0,1,3,0,2,0,5,6,0,1,5,1,25,2,24,24,4,9,0,2,0,0,33,4,0,9,6,135,43,7,0.0,0.15831302512639975,0.13038987097420146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086341262961277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995452357116428,0.0,0.12491285544892347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145102926544204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443913497699024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508320262242627,0.0,0.1386722375781009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692819863400672,0.13673548435821892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765041199897579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519224099905734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323133418810533,0.0,0.13961761471738654,0.2563531458712432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686798192319045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876397570083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943768811316121,0.06527799300707905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458575687861486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12820808614014348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09054161052545126,0.10162093387749974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785239745455848,0.0,0.0,0.2993608366287985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711955692590491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141072720755133,0.0,0.10625674855035472,0.0,0.27045290421947066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134117047043304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335724201044824,0.0,0.0,0.1551383903497206,0.26630545534244443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907164440368214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024713363310797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972739866253608,0.13569346031375998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604427658161624
mentalhealth,jobthrowaway1984,2020/01/14,"Some days, I am so messed up--others, it is like nothing bad ever happened. I am not sure what is wrong with me, but I find that I have these weird ""cycles"".

Day 1: I am a clear, quick-thinker. No mistakes are being made--I am highly productive, quick-thinking, and almost Spock-like in my logic. I work as a programmer so this is where I benefit from these days. I feel like I am on top of the world, no stresses and any stress that enters my mind just drifts away like a fart in the wind. I am tranquil.

Day 2: I wake up, and am bitter at the world. My apartment is filthy, I can't find the energy to get out of bed, and I am hating myself. I hate my life. I can barely take care of my cat, I am stupid because of x and y mistake I made at work, I'll never make it in my career. I will be a failure, and can never improve my situation. To top it all off, I can't think clearly at all. I am suffering from these weird, illogical thoughts that make no sense. Why would my landlord hate me? I know she doesn't, but I feel like she does. I feel like nobody trusts me at work, or thinks I am competent. I keep making mistakes at work, I can't focus, and I just want to sleep.

Day 3: See day 2.

Day 4: See day 3.

Day 5: Ah, all is good. I woke up feeling great, got a good night's sleep... did a bit of exercise. I am pumped. Maybe I'll start working on my novel that I've wanted to fo so long! Maybe I'll binge watch that great series, and perhaps buy a Marvel Omnibus when I get home. I'll even play with my adorable kitten when I get home! And CLEAN MY APARTMENT! Maybe I'll cook that recipe I found online... mmm, that sounds good!!",-0.16882147732443542,1.80121355043228,1.913678901865616,97.60679318974672,86.40634005763691,4.690095555892613,17.777112088578797,5.9092894577622985,-0.5049723342939479,1230,30,295,9,38,410,176,347,0.18600000000000005,0.598,0.215,0.9121,0,0,0,0,0,1,72.0,0,0,0,8,10,33,5,2,11,1,30,6,3,4,9,53,60,18,0,6,6,0,4,5,0,2,2,1,5,0,15,12,1,1,12,4,1,2,10,16,1,0,6,9,49,17,29,50,5,42,0,1,3,0,2,23,0,3,22,166,64,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091377300987931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494965327927436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591824226528955,0.0,0.06746816420251621,0.04925751397452376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821730065500688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238530677660039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4690084433217885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071233390385345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05337043764433599,0.07309206012438749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16342820413157336,0.17317969303206365,0.0,0.0,0.14770722074159004,0.0,0.0,0.08859767710949021,0.0,0.0,0.12665063910277435,0.0,0.0,0.2033242853223654,0.06462653137588731,0.1781739170815844,0.0,0.0,0.0714549215105587,0.0,0.0,0.2393323705846926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537411475254003,0.16210647978222542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182252017576007,0.0,0.0,0.044407896430958486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05707442352953454,0.19738434748910536,0.0,0.0,0.07150920857670921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15291784903424074,0.16181237056217412,0.0,0.2435361561068101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815892464886202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464242077141904,0.0,0.0,0.07582930428434959,0.0,0.07753384643077156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287810331267378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908273499758549,0.16172518930936106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057193656119626915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18512196507227188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761570387899172,0.0,0.06075473136584659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20710437396298464,0.0,0.06414953968597346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953208672195081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291325722146147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941322411004369,0.0,0.0,0.05740101285650082,0.08834675026565443,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,catsqua,2020/01/14,"Anyone else scared of being sent back to hospital for mental health help because you don’t need it but you don’t trust anyone. Anyone else scared they are constantly going back to the hospital because of the police, therapists, and doctors. I’ve felt my best in weeks yet I feel like I have to watch out for everything I do or that they will send me right back to the hospital.",5.191891891891891,6.1962041351351385,5.49010810810811,82.06164864864867,68.45945945945945,9.163243243243244,26.962162162162162,9.3871,2.1829383783783785,302,9,58,6,5,96,50,74,0.07,0.746,0.185,0.8898,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,2,1,4,5,0,2,3,0,7,2,0,0,0,7,12,3,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,2,3,9,3,10,8,1,12,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,1,7,39,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3574024203663405,0.3491503034953717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3930367013278216,0.0,0.2077249746344817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17880402269050386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18412099723531208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439185604708152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28466240774522833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531271781233194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614959632186298,0.12171999910815146,0.1635921818328646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968312726537508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811067063009092,0.0,0.0,0.1142025851567398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08323939896078475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17170366173527232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633512288246734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145504178469311,0.0,0.0,0.341161588043487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19782511338934605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366691124574675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,__Ajs_,2020/01/14,"From minor anxiety to depression So this is my first ever post and really the only reason  I'm doing this is because no one knows who I am and it's really just a way for me to vent and hopefully find some people that can relate to this. Also I'm really just spewing out my thoughts so it might be all over the place :/

So to start I don't wanna come across as the attention seeking type of person, I've only been diagnosed with anxiety, (I'm not sure what type i think it's social but I also worry about very little things that turn into severe panic attacks were I feel like I'm going to die) Ive been told I have the symptoms of depression but again I don't wanna come across as an attention seeker. Anyway I'll get to  the main things. So I don't have any friends at all. None. I have a girlfriend and she is really the only person I fully trust and even then I have moments of fear and doubt but I'm lucky enough that she stays around and helps and doesn't leave lol. Anyway, it's because I hate everyone and I don't trust anyone because I feel like everyone hates me and wants to take advantage of me or humiliate me and because of that I shut myself out from everyone else and keep to myself 24/7. It started as one minor panic attack and led to this. The problem is though.. I want friends, I want to have someone that I can go and vent to, to feel appreciated and to have someone I can trust. I can't take compliments or have a conversation with someone without thinking they're being fake and/ or wanting to use me. I got so lonely from this and this leaded me to become so so sad all the time, most nights I would spend crying uncontrollably. I literally couldn't do anything without feeling sad. Listening to music? Nope it's time to cry. Going for a walk? Jump in front of a car you pathetic piece of trash. Laying in bed trying to sleep?  Grab a knife and cut yourself to make up for all the pain you've put everyone else through. It was the worst feeling I've ever felt and It hurts remembering this. I say all of this in past tense because I think I'm better now but I've said that before and it's come back in a wave. So yeah I'm not entirely sure what's wrong with me but it's a lot of feeling not good enough, feeling guilty for everything, feeling hated and feeling scared yet guilty for being scared like I'm doing something wrong by being scared as if I'm a pathetic human for feeling that way. This was really confronting to talk about but I really am just desperate for someone to help me and be there to talk to that understands and has sympathy.. well fingers crossed I guess if anyone cares.",2.7145259888852564,4.563474372180451,4.224946060804188,85.3707404380517,75.95488721804512,7.182477933965348,23.97123242889833,8.04050195162591,1.3535727688787187,2074,66,415,34,46,690,237,532,0.301,0.604,0.095,-0.9992,0,2,1,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,0,4,28,45,7,8,20,2,40,5,2,5,9,105,95,50,1,12,19,0,13,3,3,2,3,3,1,3,32,33,0,1,22,0,1,14,15,27,1,3,10,16,43,18,70,77,14,49,0,6,0,0,20,16,0,13,18,286,75,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297119543829653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043781402755008636,0.0,0.0985028363809371,0.0,0.0,0.09003362083062988,0.0,0.052980216589788784,0.05731289015532295,0.0,0.14648574857988608,0.0,0.04950514507372269,0.0,0.1962308157859199,0.0711039431686491,0.05478363306030158,0.0,0.0,0.05693991224420501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564089274138755,0.0,0.0,0.16637602960611714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143938243687826,0.0,0.0,0.11090281332239203,0.06534553148719248,0.066817489115156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756441124852167,0.0,0.0,0.13304591583282555,0.0,0.042523155038706455,0.11647290679834382,0.0,0.2460758645174685,0.05786164352169701,0.0,0.0,0.07244671433852397,0.3255305356635849,0.0919878402276204,0.061816018711758236,0.0,0.05884322225150095,0.05476258960067075,0.0,0.0,0.09948146318143837,0.0,0.03363650365275507,0.0,0.10976790629939133,0.05399987014980442,0.051491502311155055,0.0,0.07092311622992292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19068922702068372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630668118593393,0.0,0.0,0.06394502771323562,0.0,0.0,0.0689213731516999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722494128785902,0.0,0.0,0.03538220685879784,0.0,0.0,0.06817036223634314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943601617033084,0.06452684504104977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05473456772974477,0.0,0.0,0.04297493034408461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829824640984307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604173659592025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872526928448209,0.14689434082451364,0.0685061031990616,0.1510748606292558,0.0,0.0,0.061459110846949425,0.04463379635223901,0.11243030723085036,0.06726461894168806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06165936345897378,0.0,0.0,0.06160408402190255,0.0,0.0647208572067718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24746535323814245,0.06619456456785441,0.0,0.0,0.0729313143024917,0.0,0.06124123501313434,0.05119848978910827,0.1933703451529429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273239578264265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442766447312381,0.06562849424957652,0.21819982282711448,0.049563769400799734,0.0,0.0,0.09113864580285908,0.06862176014032391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135698003203893,0.06691668586945927,0.09681325375000112,0.10349429011529444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554397609028196,0.12375856080538712,0.06325417182131841,0.051111456868815804,0.07508235495685478,0.0,0.0,0.06151896612936712,0.0,0.0437105877705488,0.07002822453091585,0.0,0.06702306762226587,0.0,0.0556046591027583,0.0,0.053121207100725744,0.15189472652298033,0.10220555076921553,0.0,0.0,0.05788640294486855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12412229925095808,0.0,0.0,0.06538220242105854,0.0,0.04573453538720997,0.14078140350835205,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlackManHaram,2020/01/14,"I'm always thinking... I'm always thinking outside of the box and about people and what to say next to get what I want, or am I just thinking this? Just like that I always second guess things and manipulate things around and just my mind is always busy and I constantly talk to myself what the hell is this. Someone please. I'm not like anyone I know.",4.208142857142857,5.353229242857147,4.704285714285717,86.2707142857143,70.85714285714286,6.742857142857144,24.0,6.742157984588678,0.7463714285714285,277,7,55,2,5,88,41,70,0.066,0.812,0.12300000000000001,0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,19,13,6,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,7,2,6,13,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,2,4,37,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6299932390488441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235081466482573,0.0,0.0,0.16850166932911065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20454727717861307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889236087246177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20851615485412112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402478228018004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18494786218925985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19112149605145065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20130422243563034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122474147553242,0.0,0.0,0.2077754852368428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15052514317833496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16037855661284528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521382066337719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25150193496084416,0.3638539957234943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164379824524444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,not-so-new-here,2020/01/14,"Well, I made my first therapy appointment. ...And I'm ashamed to say I have to cancel. I made the executive decision to make my therapy a priority this year, and I finally made my first appointment. But I have to cancel because a) I didn't consult with my fiance first b) we can't afford it ($200 for first appt and $180/mo after, no insurance) and c) he think's ""I'm placing too much hope into it""

I budgeted for this, so I was sure I could afford it. 

It doesn't feel right that I should have to consult with ANYONE before doing this sort of thing?

Fine, it's cancelled but idk how much longer I can hold out without any sort of guidance. 

I find myself daydreaming, hard, about leaving town and going back to school. I've decided on a degree, the schools, and I'm researching new jobs, financial aid and housing. I'm not sure if this is my subconscious telling me what I really want to do or if it's just a coping mechanism to escape reality throughout the day. I promise myself over and over that if I get out of this relationship, I'll leave and follow this..... dream? idea? nonsense???",3.0036763952893004,4.722433824884797,4.772496159754227,82.31842677931391,74.80645161290323,8.32452636968766,27.26292882744496,8.998388855275968,2.26064280593958,848,33,169,19,18,288,129,217,0.08,0.82,0.1,0.7236,3,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,1,0,0,4,7,7,0,1,7,0,13,0,0,5,2,44,28,17,0,7,9,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,16,15,0,1,6,1,1,2,6,1,1,4,5,3,24,6,24,21,2,21,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,7,10,113,40,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733403933962752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979839941985189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875161633298407,0.0,0.07828725763490603,0.0,0.10928101120078317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253765854573288,0.0,0.0,0.0828241033084245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493601122600197,0.0,0.0,0.14068433378099485,0.11737897745624702,0.4369561369504286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709725016568069,0.0,0.07298741812532784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11504441184381292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755593047421054,0.0,0.14818628556044044,0.0,0.14497724793671862,0.0,0.0,0.12744292349585265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719690426851092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3645591731601904,0.08572530848977129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18881567739779576,0.0,0.0,0.12403456776543305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341777674345163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227294214331031,0.0,0.0,0.13788139153610862,0.0,0.10967504631377538,0.0,0.10212945771501053,0.0,0.2599478039956645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420798467231384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224992731237576,0.0,0.2937324969517902,0.0,0.08532048430405947,0.08229015318425263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574894354043014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547033840614734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379801792061215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270209117679153
mentalhealth,00CreamCheese00,2020/01/14,"My friend is delusional...?? Help? I hope it's ok to ask for a diagnosis...

I have a friend, who I am sure is mentally ill...I don't know what's wrong with their head. They are a very nice person, but I'm having trouble staying friends with them due to their...craziness...

They insist that they know all these celebrities and think they are part of a popular band...(I will not say which band) They talk about this band like they are a member...

They are constantly talking about how they wrote all these songs for all these singers, or that popular artist stole their songs...they seem so sure of it, and it's scaring me. They have apparently dated all these popular band members too and they keep telling me how a popular celebrity abused them.

This person was abused as a child and has mental issues in general. Is this maybe a coping mechanism?  What's going on? This isn't even half of their craziness. There is so much more, but I'm keeping certain details vague for obvious reasons...

This isn't even the first person I've met like this. I met a woman a very long time ago who was exactly like this. She thought she wrote all the songs on the radio. It was insane.

Does anyone have any clue what's going on with my friend? I want her to get help, but she get's mad when people don't believe her. :(",2.7912330163043464,4.8306861328125015,3.2704008152173927,91.43995244565218,76.34375,6.483423913043477,23.239809782608692,7.423996415210882,0.8312430706521736,1014,31,212,13,23,315,133,256,0.102,0.68,0.21899999999999997,0.981,1,0,0,0,2,0,53.0,0,0,15,1,11,21,1,1,13,1,22,1,1,3,10,37,42,14,0,2,5,0,0,3,4,1,0,3,0,5,23,7,0,2,6,7,0,2,5,4,0,2,8,3,29,17,19,33,8,15,0,0,0,0,45,4,0,3,11,134,52,0,0.0,0.2844713882162015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641414496699662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08163586384686279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393943488857865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122274473854376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525150752161585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972782145581552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050536649163205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15857940936722245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021116507746098,0.0,0.0,0.3709910908524976,0.0,0.1254388785963089,0.0,0.1364505975829681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12320253449888935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16092952785902825,0.0,0.0,0.11923344725368293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252975522892469,0.0,0.21340602272438336,0.0,0.0,0.13194903954492013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17594624266573988,0.0,0.0,0.1062375404899413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060303262624712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24195765075544726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824812781335256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299988637328075,0.0,0.08322525759097882,0.31446041044134804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234279881506429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546594395289182,0.12018767616363915,0.0,0.0,0.1092859953545561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795379579533195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22628516391308626,0.0,0.0,0.1929779597071804,0.10492609585201436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692106986100368,0.0,0.09530366026200714,0.07000018867438422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981021784305317,0.0708066463909034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312522071676117,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Plugnub235,2020/01/14,"UK. In need of help on what to do.. Hello all. I have struggled with depression since my late teens (now 30) I have also abused alcohol almost daily for the past 10 years.. along with not so regular cannabis use and infrequent mdma doses (1-2 times a year) I am now currently sober for over 30 days. Which I plan on sticking to. 

Over the past few months my dissatisfaction with life has grew to an almost unmanageable level. I struggle to get up. Something as small as stubbing my toe can send me into a spiral or crying, wanting to punch walls and just feeling trapped and that this will never change. 

I'm currently having counselling which I don't feel is helping me in all honesty.. how do I get specialist help? As I cant deal with this anymore and fear for myself. 

I have booked to see my gp tomorrow but all they say is i can give you a therapy number..  or meds.. 
I feel let down and brushed to one side by them in all honesty. 

I just don't know how this could ever end. It affects every aspect of my life. Iv ended up in tears just trying to screw a door to its hinges.. 

Please. Any advice on what I can do? I feel stuck and lost and that I cant live like this anymore",2.285070028011205,4.119747394957988,3.6047899159663888,89.40393557422968,77.15126050420167,6.382072829131652,23.098039215686285,7.2636822038024595,0.8021602240896364,912,28,192,11,21,298,148,238,0.127,0.821,0.052000000000000005,-0.9159,2,1,2,0,1,0,32.0,0,1,2,2,10,7,1,3,7,0,21,7,1,4,6,40,36,17,0,3,7,0,4,1,0,1,5,1,1,0,12,13,1,0,5,1,0,2,6,6,0,1,2,7,26,1,36,31,5,36,0,2,1,1,11,17,1,4,18,130,38,1,0.0,0.1520297392917477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253858269636878,0.0,0.137127408731312,0.25697355875778904,0.0,0.0,0.10261173567929756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725713454220993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545037268295798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573797618966188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024473657124028,0.0,0.14094563497568469,0.08275116988024013,0.1322849088563001,0.11051566526239827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272941905581685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606631422816502,0.10810910588523563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14438762356590895,0.2595153189306668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13407633104776273,0.12308937278631228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580161855802273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705173838662634,0.0,0.1447424779203132,0.0,0.0,0.13120857733428526,0.1812623139776591,0.0626871746682316,0.0,0.11330259281488625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006862757237878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252664458324055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024180885942098,0.0,0.0,0.09514234862023407,0.09896277619480984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694810444212722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449782586467427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14084897203612995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203952433605164,0.0,0.0,0.1022487246362926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10614171121955414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878149677444699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26828089031389074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673692067688426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482025170455217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711599898606537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082110017473197,0.0,0.0,0.07568224037175017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652585303806283
mentalhealth,LA457,2020/01/14,"Hello quick question I dont know how to describe my Problem accurately.
(Sorry for the Bad english)
Since 4-5 years i think i feel less and less Feelings like joy hate etc. The only thing i feel is fear and shame.",2.2373255813953503,4.28259127906977,3.4211046511627927,89.68188953488372,78.06976744186046,5.230232558139536,24.703488372093023,5.985473137389443,0.5965860465116282,167,6,34,1,4,54,36,43,0.312,0.5770000000000001,0.111,-0.8871,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,1,2,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,10,8,3,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,5,2,2,8,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21659472920112596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040240821613716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893083373742921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29190596430021065,0.3934932279110128,0.18532102836345354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256111558236834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256377679083762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12673357812023964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19729136833019956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482182900278516,0.0,0.0,0.2905961735904002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145848639989242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29038586334684385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233905677230654,0.16621808346612912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16705015803370693
mentalhealth,snacksize666,2020/01/14,"I feel like I don't exist when I'm alone Have you even been alone for more than one or two days and felt unreal?
I just finished reading my diary just to remind myself that I do exist, which sounds absurd, and I ended up feeling like I stole someone else's memories. Like an unmemorable shadow with no meaning or depth to it.
What do you think is the reason for this?",4.282,4.962134533333334,5.364000000000001,83.32200000000002,70.33333333333334,7.6,24.333333333333336,7.554174236665415,1.0887333333333329,290,7,58,3,5,96,57,75,0.083,0.7909999999999999,0.126,0.4871,0,2,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,1,0,13,12,5,0,0,4,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,4,10,3,7,10,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,7,42,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4809995597400856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497563958800387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939818607065271,0.0,0.20566935084859767,0.0,0.0,0.15337267487965311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23482495108504595,0.3317820867071174,0.2229582478441011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3403385846920276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25294502841130856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735166969480394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23227308148866999,0.0,0.0,0.23875080343931546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19675098458004125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487909468986243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22683566506319375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,selenitethedutchy,2020/01/14,I can’t stop myself from hurting myself Lately I keep getting destructive ideas in my head about hurting myself. Once they come I literally cannot stop until I’ve done what I thought about. I’ve attempted to pour boiling water on myself( I was stopped by my partner) I’ve purposely fell from heights to try to break my arm and I’ve also left my house with the intention to get hit by a car. In July of last year I sort of tried to kill myself( I tried to OD but didn’t take enough) and was hospitalized I started getting better but the last few weeks have been really hard because of my destructive thoughts. When they happen it like a voice in my head is screaming at me to hurt myself and it won’t stop until I do it. I don’t really know what to do about this and I’m hesitant to tell my family because I don’t want them to be upset. I by no means what to die I’m at a point in my life where I’m relatively happy and not super stressed I just can’t get over there thoughts. Any advise would be appreciated.,3.0215699052132683,4.248884720379145,4.6526510663507095,85.19376332938391,73.83412322274881,7.7394549763033185,25.50977488151659,8.278499904357787,1.4857319905213269,800,26,170,13,16,270,116,211,0.22,0.69,0.09,-0.9792,0,0,0,0,0,5,12.0,0,0,3,3,8,13,3,2,5,0,18,6,3,1,0,26,37,11,3,2,4,0,1,1,1,2,1,2,0,1,7,7,2,5,6,0,0,3,9,9,0,0,8,3,31,4,33,24,2,29,0,3,0,0,6,12,0,1,14,110,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458161109079652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042862065955363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14419431860487802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460145893232092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018803550517593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12274706033378388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103272465647415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222059918305959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149576800161357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471677399410538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045870252760728,0.12590212483587546,0.10594796060221884,0.0,0.24276119451849315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364693381688234,0.37983600074939095,0.13351403607044166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512507150264637,0.13084980181965353,0.0,0.0649988788497315,0.19281398401740096,0.13341531223839626,0.0,0.12850224286456313,0.0,0.08353860098242015,0.057781441231850535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12883224780930186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259552013357545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180471971132312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15153539912328828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371311914926019,0.0,0.0,0.3955208087059411,0.13547951093409985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892538807228098,0.0,0.10337443328094256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28168288706022604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24089559000263466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975954726750859,0.0,0.09487019834670707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401662272637057,0.0,0.0,0.07616291619288283
mentalhealth,shshxbfnrpwpzmz,2020/01/14,"I keep having extreme anger episodes that are impossible to control [M16] Hey,

Ive been having huge rage outbursts every couple months for the last maybe 8 years. It often stems from nothing but sometimes it’s from an event that would make anyone upset (like a breakup).

It usually happens on a whim, like a sudden burst of adrenaline and then I just get a laser like focus on whatever is making me angry. An example of this:

I was sparring with some friends at a mates house a few years ago, just some friendly fighting, fun stuff. I was losing badly to this guy who kept jabbing me and just pissing me off. Towards the end of the sparring match I just lost it and couldn’t control myself, and ended up going too far and really hurting him. 

Sometimes however, I just get so badly angry that I violently shake and scream under my breath, or yank at my hair and feel just weak and like I want to rip my hair out but im not at all violent towards others.

I was wondering if anybody had any idea about what could be going on, or if anybody else experiences something similar.",5.849364548494982,6.456968265700482,6.296328502415459,78.28177257525084,66.82608695652173,8.688071348940914,32.34819769602378,8.617729084823388,2.606662133036046,849,34,154,12,13,275,136,207,0.22899999999999998,0.6509999999999999,0.12,-0.9819,1,0,1,0,2,0,21.0,0,0,0,4,10,22,6,2,11,0,14,5,4,4,1,40,27,16,0,6,13,0,3,4,3,1,1,1,0,1,13,10,0,4,3,0,0,3,2,15,0,0,7,4,18,7,23,16,4,28,0,3,0,0,8,14,1,8,15,107,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313754427902905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446525931601976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713084556150572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319722599367294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31160434759636385,0.11091032290985584,0.1537040322637873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604356373213913,0.0,0.2460704762395741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170397672975564,0.0,0.0,0.13588307418235648,0.0,0.0,0.07023833073330521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21464689628969366,0.0,0.14515208924767706,0.0,0.15789434296524915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754520868175185,0.1228398595273157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16028636713008426,0.14870869770034184,0.15681529704593444,0.1500493308388037,0.0,0.0,0.12347180715864985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323222287410392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27146251097477964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554075481547038,0.15163939653854974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854503366079293,0.0,0.13955627115930422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087862727170962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332902843194793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899090060447036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069416243998788,0.2747760167600489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590215709110909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299248654319814,0.0,0.08193418795888012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15064467394715228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867945002187536,0.0,0.0,0.17891018320156493
mentalhealth,2MessC,2020/01/14,"I need a better mindset So I was diagnosed with Depression from an early age, roughly 7 (now 20), and throughout life, I've kind of just floated, not really caring about my future when it comes to work, lifestyle, ect. And ive found myself in a very bad circle of thinking. I'm currently set on not living past 25 (I'm not sure if when it comes to it, i will go through with it, but who knows) unless my life gets better, in which i want to improve on myself, and part of that is if i can even get into one relationship (and i know thats a lot of pressure on a relationship, but its the only way i can see im worthy of living) that the whole plan will be scrapped, but my mindset is currently saying that whats the point in trying to better myself if its all in vain and i dont accomplish anything by 25 so ive wasted time doing stuff i dont enjoy when i could of been getting fat and living more lavishly. The only reason I want to live past 25 is to have a family and thats the only thing tethering me to living, aside from the repurcussions on my friends and family. I know 25 is a really young age, i acknowledge that, but i dont want to love to 60 and never find love and what not. Sorry if this is confusing to read, im not a very good writer.

Tldr; dont want to live past 25 unless my life improves, mindset doesnt see the point in putting effort into a dead end",4.9744679930795845,4.249454429065743,6.561641435986157,80.19014381487891,68.72318339100346,9.439532871972318,28.097102076124568,8.841846274778883,1.9493406574394456,1066,29,227,16,16,370,142,289,0.153,0.74,0.106,-0.9539,2,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,7,9,16,0,2,16,0,22,7,1,1,3,51,45,25,1,10,16,0,1,0,1,2,5,1,0,0,19,16,1,0,8,1,0,4,11,5,0,1,3,4,25,11,37,38,5,36,0,1,2,2,7,13,0,6,17,155,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935983613153457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037492386350584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22363119123392944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859347480460806,0.0,0.0,0.14520909743908408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729516307326451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259503125596742,0.085548071480577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3951282048957183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465199086795953,0.0,0.0,0.055669818946134215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589138537215202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703547692936764,0.0,0.0,0.09241476857660393,0.06511881631038614,0.0,0.13210718254269166,0.0,0.047901427384845235,0.07069473070890503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820857413973719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777044286542711,0.1389634222543706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786001556995684,0.0,0.0,0.4465541738675494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716565709396737,0.15214202130664636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06249667642549155,0.0650062216427147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057114078304073085,0.19230890441851767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127305034223973,0.24138031881635386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593541996439151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473026988378413,0.0,0.0,0.08430837111422351,0.0,0.10799097885743032,0.08665959572746569,0.0,0.1809823017180101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06702726207123558,0.0,0.0,0.13432936123997571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435078637161183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648680362536027,0.0,0.0,0.07943814493637284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599558236616792,0.05400678498415597,0.0,0.0,0.04914758915104996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722436411410696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908883189902932,0.1988552335006635,0.06690195613934435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941018202345405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061360893149879435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tyraso,2020/01/14,"Recently started I feel fine
But sometimes at random times of the day
I somewhat feel numb, like a small current of electricity goes trough my body, but it's very minimal, feel dizzy and lost, and I do not know what I'm talking about, I can't hear myself, it lasts about 5 to 10 seconds, no anxiety or paranoja, just that dizzy lost feeling 
No previous problems, been an anxious person, but nothing that would be abnormal, but these things are weird
Happened 3 times past these two days
18m

What could this be?",6.201462585034015,6.687114112244897,6.0718367346938775,80.62197278911567,66.04081632653062,9.390476190476187,34.70068027210884,9.2995712137729,3.0510353741496585,405,18,77,7,6,127,77,98,0.27,0.6859999999999999,0.045,-0.9717,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,3,7,0,0,3,0,8,2,1,0,0,19,19,7,0,3,7,0,4,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,10,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,5,0,2,3,5,6,2,6,12,1,11,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,3,10,47,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14441066291627816,0.21325951366194792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096840070284749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071970728632578,0.0,0.0,0.2434856575417217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817967659153995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16693114928624153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21276064693521224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10374458514392007,0.15387501396813966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222484688504584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41213558593533456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18113257729013288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18020498222669665,0.0,0.16482911351200485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18063005977916616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863903502881871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18670111008980267,0.0,0.1336143479847026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517284130357455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541224953074132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22014985661332792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18440358001827206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15575731652359406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13409876945864532,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lostthelyrics,2020/01/14,"post-interview anxiety, pls send help I need to write this down somewhere and process my thoughts welp

I'm  fresh out of university trying to find a job and obviously like many of  us on here I really struggle with interviews. The main problem I'm  having is the fact that even when it's over I can't get out of my  anxious state. You know when you finish an exam and you leave the hall  just feeling that sense of euphoria like thank fuck that is over !! I  wanna get that after job interviews but the sense of dread just doesn't  die down :(

I had an interview  last week and I spent the rest of the week feeling so sick. Contantly  felt that tightness in my chest and the sinking feeling in my stomach so  strong to the point I wanted to rip my insides out just to stop the  sensation :/ Then I got to this weekend and I think the built up stress  finally took its toll on me and I've never slept so much in my life. I  managed to have a 5 hour nap on friday, then sleep completely through  the night, then on saturday I napped for 7 hours and STILL slept through  the night for another 8 hours. I'm constantly exhausted and I cant stay  up for longer than 4 hours without feeling like I've been awake for 3  days.

In terms of the actual  interviews. I know I experience more dread than what is considered just  normal nerves, but thats fine with me. If anything the nerves beforehand  help me out because I'm so nervous that I end up being ridiculously  prepared. I just wish that after the interview I could just switch it  off and chill. Why does that euphoric 'ITS OVER' feeling never come? And  why does one stupid 30 minute interview leave me completely crippled  for a whole week? :(((

If anyone  has any advice on how I can just relax afterward I'd really appreciate  it. I just don't know why the anxiety lingers so much when I should be  ecstatic that the interview is over and I did it?",4.055332046332048,5.527237062162161,4.7441119691119695,84.58574324324327,71.62162162162161,8.745173745173744,28.349420849420852,9.23628265651192,2.3196177606177604,1483,56,300,32,28,476,190,370,0.133,0.701,0.166,0.9285,2,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,3,0,1,20,17,3,5,22,0,19,9,5,1,4,60,47,28,1,10,13,0,7,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,19,19,0,2,12,4,1,3,7,10,0,1,10,7,35,7,52,33,7,61,0,0,0,1,15,25,1,2,34,195,54,11,0.0,0.0,0.09312084004531268,0.0,0.0,0.09324801059366647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489213656118685,0.10006122351244467,0.14599942230870516,0.10780286291785368,0.0,0.06672323921109365,0.0,0.07852648004962609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817007265276008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220001609757381,0.2001021754760341,0.10312030900398876,0.0,0.07618893837187793,0.0,0.0,0.06154110199285616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903587723306297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670137718586783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451804961650496,0.0,0.0,0.0630271807238652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334376542276657,0.0,0.0,0.2412482315073951,0.06817149650757236,0.0916227730381113,0.10453320456452904,0.08721653884440311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821869036039047,0.0997110394424598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631993014051801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792246454505676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37589682632016536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18938878031483086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732892425800152,0.07778394854442554,0.0,0.20208217084411606,0.0,0.0,0.0674013586037768,0.13985921221965092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674577014065808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402964160966177,0.07075628040970862,0.14719497771729428,0.0,0.0,0.17909942193632652,0.09349604383652498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466231439751742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902072804456406,0.0,0.0913905809789943,0.0,0.0,0.09130864662893418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226314131864102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549371509870096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171014060497363,0.07620636890384484,0.07977940601511561,0.10930878650763133,0.0997587203748031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785433552720766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061144359043181315,0.0,0.07575663250289459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602046443264168,0.06478717565648807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478428559441388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056284019676172574,0.0,0.2296320569549687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583181200810574,0.10653838188526953,0.10973381115889368,0.09198610239093152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,curious-lettuce,2020/01/14,"I don't want to live anymore I feel like a failure, I'm stressed to the point where I feel like if I just end it then I won't have to feel so much pain and stress and sadness and anger. It doesn't feel worth it anymore. I don't feel like I'm worth anything anymore. I'm not worth the effort or the time or the money. I don't want to keep waking up everyday and expect something different but everyday just keeps getting worse. I hate myself and I'm not getting better it's not worth it anymore. I'm so confused. I feel so worthless and I want to die but I don't want to leave my bf and my best friends. Do they really even care though? I doubt it at this point. What do I do? How do I make these thoughts stop taking over my life? Please help me.",0.0201851851851842,2.071924969135804,1.6866666666666674,99.0,86.3456790123457,4.587654320987656,20.11111111111111,5.82211442006289,-0.25705185185185186,583,18,139,4,18,189,81,162,0.298,0.555,0.147,-0.9687,1,0,1,0,0,2,14.0,0,0,1,3,9,16,2,4,5,0,11,3,1,2,0,36,35,18,1,6,10,0,6,3,2,1,2,0,0,0,9,7,0,3,7,0,5,0,9,9,0,0,1,6,20,7,9,33,2,12,0,2,0,0,4,6,0,5,9,81,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4731312891174563,0.0,0.0,0.09814824355451034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251654813307507,0.10548375855439207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216027178182376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378241572985835,0.1246107439236584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563695346169302,0.0,0.0,0.07877606484246732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618360099897861,0.2556174415995304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921469513147737,0.0,0.1246262837464154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775346787625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994351203776658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120235754564979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262886742758496,0.0,0.0,0.08424323815313907,0.17480646038891956,0.0,0.10531673242402766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961299899559637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767645517902801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269106495696703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092157144509334,0.2254955557914609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640679019547261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918191208672194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971424374627903,0.273244525770643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896754620874003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718120954141525,0.09468628178755398,0.06954672645083045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813918396909039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215453238807356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adamacel4,2020/01/14,Aware and Observing So guys I love to observe and be aware but sometimes I'm too aware or self conscious. It's sort of like my gift or my thing (observation)  but I like let the things I am aware off affect me instead of knowing and not caring about it soo any tips?,1.051333333333332,3.3149265272727315,2.3595454545454544,94.47265151515153,83.72727272727272,5.121212121212121,21.89393939393939,6.42735559955562,0.27712121212121144,209,7,46,2,6,67,41,55,0.057,0.742,0.201,0.8302,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,12,7,8,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,5,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,3,2,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22143439123023148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319937281437434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3224173603249065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895354975266767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33297095531079496,0.0,0.31816530380992936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938869200723868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3396951683172573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220488697986934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43265809400769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway88177,2020/01/14,"Trying to juggle everything is hard I'm in the process of getting rediagnosed, possibly with a borderline personality disorder. I realized that my issues may be a product of my childhood trauma and I'm working on going through all of it in an attempt to start healing. A loved one of mine is facing legal charges and may go to prison. I'm trying to keep up with school, seeing friends and just remain overall functional but none of that is going too well.

I reached out for help 5 months ago when the crisis hit and nothing that could actually help me has happened yet. It's frustrating and I don't know what to do - trying to live life as if nothing is wrong is exhausting.",5.356837606837608,6.574842307692308,6.2910256410256435,75.68619658119661,68.23076923076923,9.162393162393165,34.44444444444444,9.444778638647367,3.356649572649573,540,26,96,11,9,179,90,130,0.149,0.7090000000000001,0.142,-0.2427,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,5,7,1,0,6,0,12,5,1,0,1,18,26,9,0,2,3,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,6,8,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,4,1,1,0,2,7,3,21,21,2,14,0,0,1,1,5,5,0,3,6,67,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.17363873625211346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772849952382512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420664909041373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20392874198179345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599163607227634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747201585611496,0.0,0.0929636098146693,0.0,0.30337340993388234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734719121128904,0.0,0.15939466651163384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23853194484769386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18571774384617987,0.0,0.1581566612413402,0.0,0.0,0.09778833456531932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568063952108244,0.0,0.0,0.15711972347574465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16059313997475708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202589154449013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3414665554670468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120573252449809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15536583886143707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20059479669264385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800795573824686,0.14179103003273125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12594319544802593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36241822885818803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15998479011063074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295386825804479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19454381466071305,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PanicChants,2020/01/14,"Annual.. something. Every year around this time I usually hit a bit of a low point followed by an overwhelming sense that I'm not meant to be happy. My birthday is in a month and a half and, valentine's day is in a month, the new year just started aswell so all of that could be contributing. So I'm wanting to know if anyone else starts to feel like this around this time?",6.2282894736842085,5.310343671052632,6.259473684210532,84.0263157894737,66.23684210526315,9.705263157894738,30.842105263157894,8.841846274778883,2.1454842105263165,293,9,63,4,4,93,54,76,0.028999999999999998,0.885,0.086,0.6249,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,7,0,5,0,0,0,1,13,15,5,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,1,2,2,10,10,2,19,0,2,0,0,0,6,0,1,13,38,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789374064996755,0.2167185005913228,0.0,0.3765801101558168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23091574883892174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16887470130636945,0.0,0.0,0.13640740295371356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17669069613762892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17820753943170997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694655656611432,0.15110383943312486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22515789732973604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624117471944045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033338224386983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3376528815444699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20427909979736736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999467096727571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16283186635770433,0.0,0.0,0.2994178201699454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24666808307680946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329500067193963,0.0,0.12475494755868435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724129094222234
mentalhealth,acounthrowaway,2020/01/14,"Suicidal mood swings? I have no idea what to call it but I constantly get into moods that can last from an hour to a full day where I am incredibly anxious, depressed, suicidal, and dissociate. It can be the simplest thing that triggers me but I get really bad. Then out of the blue I just sort of snap out of it. I mean I still feel a bit depressed but it’s manageable and no where near as bad as before. This happens to me randomly and frequently. I am getting better about it, at least compare to last year, but I still don’t know what this is. Is this not an uncommon thing to experience when you’re mentally ill?",2.5905571847507325,4.524904096774197,4.222492668621701,84.86737536656894,76.58064516129029,8.380058651026394,26.59530791788856,9.095868883498916,2.2062516129032264,484,19,101,12,11,162,79,124,0.285,0.6890000000000001,0.027000000000000003,-0.9906,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,0,6,0,9,1,0,1,0,19,16,11,2,0,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,14,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,2,11,1,17,15,3,19,0,2,1,0,1,8,0,2,11,76,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19334230389379248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285793666910487,0.0,0.0,0.14562965673789327,0.0,0.0,0.1513616277635694,0.18684327739718648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17475562075297238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849442360010742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037275004958257,0.0,0.2948095577675385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674101983238752,0.0,0.0,0.08653478697589945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682446676412509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151340741805318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685408820786272,0.0,0.0,0.1931990436384018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405543867096527,0.2790079485921479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18642434757504198,0.0,0.0,0.17247138031537068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963826369737116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273349232783863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3744042207013936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22739893610761075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021015469424747
mentalhealth,Lamelayne,2020/01/14,"Is this worth hospitalising myself over?? As the tittle says. I’ve been thinking about suicide almost 24/7 since 2014. I tried once before but obviously didn’t work. The only reason I haven’t tried to kill myself again now is because my partner is dependant on me being alive. Though lately I’m finding myself planning it more and more. Sometimes backing out, other times almost getting caught and giving up. I feel like I give myself another 4 months tops. So yeah, should I consider hospital or can this blow over.",4.586371158392435,7.32528796808511,5.053546099290781,77.4338888888889,73.57446808510639,6.73096926713948,26.401891252955078,7.793537801064563,1.9149281323877072,415,15,65,6,9,132,75,94,0.08800000000000001,0.713,0.198,0.8597,0,0,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,0,3,6,2,1,0,2,1,9,0,0,2,1,14,16,7,2,1,2,0,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,4,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,3,2,11,1,8,11,2,13,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,4,7,45,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39219367441636455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20534627460698998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505822416749416,0.0,0.11937699034208413,0.0,0.16663807895184726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901822875353307,0.13990197551874206,0.0,0.0,0.1789863316391148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231381232387808,0.3757186041087679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216658404841756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209063241140816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567331942928542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631073751959074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20855402624559388,0.0,0.1489385874119932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20134727217707005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573297182211018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199373948536966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936822401634177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21420774273139384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548083965001622,0.1924033345213222,0.0,0.11419085130242465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265913301803948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256757547002002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImReallyConfusedaaaa,2020/01/14,"Life sucks If this is the wrong subreddit please tell me,
I am too scared to tell my parents 
Im afraid of therapists 
Life sucks
Since 3rd grade I have cried myself to sleep and have wanted to kill myself. Its been weighing on my back so god damn long and I hate it. It took 2 years for me to tell a school counselor and I regretted it. My parents took me out to eat food and then acted like I was never depressed again or just completely ignored the fact after that. In middle school, I made a group of friends that made me happy, made me not want to fake being happy in public. I stopped crying at night and stopped being suicidal. Then we moved, since then I've wanted to kill myself and have been crying everyday. I dont have friends, I dont trust my parents. It sucks and it has taken me down more and more everyday, Im hardly getting sleep anymore, I just cry and then act like Im fine the next day.
I have considered self harm so many times and Im just being taken down slowly by demons just waiting for me to break
My sexuality 
My mental health
And more have just been broken too many times and has made me feel stupid, and feel useless.
My dad just cares about grades and I dont think my mom gives two sh*ts
Ive been dealing with this for 5+ years now I think.",2.2718440779610205,4.0975243869731806,3.1222422122272206,92.88937031484258,77.16091954022987,5.918440779610195,20.926370148259203,6.7026698264267655,0.2131994336165244,999,25,217,9,23,316,135,261,0.23600000000000002,0.654,0.111,-0.9891,3,0,0,0,0,2,21.0,1,0,0,0,14,26,8,2,5,0,22,8,2,4,2,44,45,22,3,5,9,5,3,2,2,0,3,0,0,1,10,17,3,4,4,0,0,5,5,17,0,1,13,3,34,9,24,29,3,35,1,3,0,0,16,8,4,2,23,133,44,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793155872617489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06149729391238555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154177242743169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385425051513652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35140344542183644,0.05157847955635636,0.0824526647409778,0.06888398060889374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811969683031126,0.0,0.0,0.0818363276250497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808774401099008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967083762774322,0.0,0.12357989802862784,0.0,0.041784625582614365,0.07672112318232656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027377917772776,0.07164358691892513,0.0789606240088987,0.0,0.0850116971972158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34555507346906944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769651647224656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298008921644273,0.0781453401021511,0.0,0.0,0.07077703343436385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027042790495257,0.0,0.16216803293327886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059789721336706,0.0,0.0,0.09366797028632924,0.0,0.08500278015068644,0.0,0.0,0.061683110174652875,0.0,0.08505633284981505,0.07505289614386812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664146246037397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779061172444003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007082181122023,0.16188177062638165,0.0,0.0,0.0834333415408104,0.0,0.0,0.13231542442572095,0.0,0.16006930238430314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337285270792376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748173998829073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097099883903588,0.0,0.0,0.09285933680179538,0.0,0.10249192720862664,0.0,0.0,0.09327033874033934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17771454134601608,0.0,0.0,0.07812580320433535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14151733057464674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744217733387437,0.0,0.1030049936827068
mentalhealth,RobertAZV,2020/01/14,"Should i seek professional help? I'm not sure if i should get some professional help. 

For the past 5-6 years i haven't really been feeling anything. Apart from my 2 nephews being born, nothing great really happened and i've been feeling numb and lost. 

Personally i've lost all my friends over the years. Only one remains, my 'best' friend, but that relationship to me doesn't look like one that best friends have. The man doesn't talk to me about anything and rarely contacts me. 

I find it hard to put myself out there because i've been hurt and brushed off too many times. 

I've never been in a relationship because i don't feel worthy of anything.

Professionally it's been the same. I feel motivated for one day but after that i don't care for the next 3 weeks etc. I work in sales as an account manager but don't care about my customer as much as i should. The inability to create new relationships and maintain them is hard for me personally which doesn't help professionally. 

Should i get some professional help or is this just phase that i need to push through for a little while longer?

Any advice is appreciated, i won't be able to reply as quickly as i'd like because i'm at work right now but i'll get to it asap!",5.081280864197532,5.867254008230454,5.823659979423868,80.36042824074076,68.58847736625515,8.708744855967076,29.59079218106996,8.841846274778883,2.1286298353909463,976,35,199,16,16,319,131,243,0.15,0.7090000000000001,0.14,0.698,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,7,8,15,0,0,9,0,23,1,0,1,3,31,39,17,0,6,8,1,6,2,3,5,1,0,0,3,9,6,0,0,6,0,2,2,10,4,0,3,7,8,22,11,29,25,8,25,0,3,1,0,17,9,0,4,16,122,31,9,0.10527570297055308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287419852762568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159108807765552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25989880042061386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925252741913049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22096071054573607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21467119087256795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789411917439828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741023718746404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21292223441143132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622008528491774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24400724090213066,0.0,0.16500662912313496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160668341809148,0.0,0.0,0.09309495645851183,0.0,0.18861270321239695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822563383383357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269981739385534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286478158050873,0.10551391129601354,0.0,0.0,0.08840507613194885,0.0,0.2298417317061838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673303913718127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773897548609907,0.07806059980907637,0.08119511217211357,0.10167592994338788,0.11196190443599377,0.0,0.0,0.10101487630165597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21401262266836305,0.08006691601396762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049757067948203,0.0,0.183845366321454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583115882967674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488462212275146,0.0,0.0,0.3390801199751317,0.0,0.0899048751201839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922110416297768,0.0,0.0,0.08461662227497779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061387109006906526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444581879046548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15328393118026715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558820222706605
mentalhealth,sunflower1004,2020/01/14,I can’t do anything It’s the second week of school I find myself waking up at 2pm. I do online school and I can’t physically bring myself to do any work all day. I’m just staying in bed a lot. I thought I would get better after winter break but it’s gotten worse.I don’t want to live like this anymore what should I do? I’m not diagnosed for anything but it’s kind of annoying that I can’t do anything.,-1.0380000000000005,1.0296988666666709,1.8883333333333359,94.8825,93.66666666666666,4.333333333333334,17.5,5.985473137389443,-0.3313333333333333,318,9,73,3,12,111,58,90,0.052000000000000005,0.861,0.087,0.1681,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,1,4,1,0,2,0,11,2,1,0,1,12,18,3,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,6,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,1,0,1,2,0,10,3,9,14,2,10,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,5,46,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634659999202104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21342527062236827,0.0,0.0,0.5312854826609764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903311003398618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387892511124921,0.0,0.0,0.21842827675794704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19669322970920194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243559217930156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22410261568233988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051381634743434,0.0,0.1900297243971248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18295937053695166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4355973636146263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22937961440386964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708485215799602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269333289053477,0.0,0.17262425806577655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15667161069901753,0.0,0.0,0.15287526974834653,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ScreenmonkeyJr,2020/01/14,"I lost all will to live. So I've been having issues with depression since highschool. I'm known to have suicidal tendencies, and I have tried befor. I've gotten help but the military mental health programs are not good at all. I've lost all my motivation to keep going on. I try and hint off to people at work I need help or at least some one can talk to me but it ses no one cares. My chain of command makes me feel like I'd be better off dead, and my family has no idea because I'm afraid they will shunne me if I told them the truth. I'm here as a last resort I'm on the edge of snapping and I'm afraid of what I will do.",2.1628467153284703,2.940908678832116,3.8785474452554745,91.65650729927007,75.35036496350365,7.231824817518247,20.9992700729927,7.554174236665415,0.4171728467153284,487,10,117,6,10,164,87,137,0.159,0.693,0.147,-0.2045,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,5,2,10,0,2,4,0,12,1,0,2,4,22,27,10,2,2,5,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,5,0,2,5,1,14,5,17,18,5,9,0,3,0,0,6,7,0,3,2,69,16,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317366858434567,0.0,0.15797887571789446,0.0,0.0,0.1641969109626911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892878193198496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599045260775059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17501917160756755,0.0,0.09387283238293136,0.13263209070929016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551211166783686,0.1557187484405845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19734276432930348,0.0,0.0,0.2488814943267572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095820891667692,0.0,0.1937757629945306,0.0,0.16501884564186514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151333742804444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070173837040592,0.0,0.1639369166751179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4053290989491685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12392626776578256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18709674503164533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13766095629879602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516094962853436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12870991887279112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357587532337835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030766231801812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922259333950244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17740147123406466,0.0,0.2520953477239733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515917507119193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tangerine159,2020/01/14,"Been a long time since I last posted anything. I thought I had beaten my depression, but lately it’s coming back. I am stuck in a bad situation where I am just trapped for 6 more months. Ive already been stuck for 8 months and suffered from really bad panic attacks, anxiety and depression. Although  I know it might just be 6 more months I am beginning to lose the will to live. What if I have to suffer more after? I keep asking myself if the fight for a better life worth it. I feel like that everyone around me will live better without me. I feel worthless. Nothing I do makes anything better. I don’t want to kill myself  because that will just be a burden to everyone that cares about me. I just want to die without causing anyone any issues. Maybe a car accident or maybe I can protect someone and die. At least that was I can die contributing to something good",3.215196078431372,5.280894441176471,4.239411764705885,84.85401960784317,75.17647058823529,6.886274509803924,26.62745098039216,7.793537801064563,1.66046274509804,685,26,129,10,15,222,100,170,0.3720000000000001,0.479,0.149,-0.9957,0,1,1,0,1,2,15.0,0,0,0,5,8,20,4,1,7,0,19,1,0,2,0,25,33,8,4,4,10,0,2,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,8,5,0,2,4,0,1,2,3,14,0,0,7,2,23,6,18,20,4,17,0,6,0,0,2,4,0,4,11,92,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646674225763208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793365067655668,0.0,0.08767062220595193,0.0,0.0,0.08013275401685427,0.0,0.1886162357831057,0.10202054935569232,0.1071378958795014,0.1303769230830861,0.0,0.08812227201711557,0.19137665215189498,0.06986063893389569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040698756427584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684491777549062,0.11772836761643005,0.0,0.09871993248542976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19741398330426727,0.0,0.3568179999798754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190152582884309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589296575499,0.08187207073864416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09612316536278252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961526724400574,0.0,0.10186399483977863,0.1267907202993694,0.0,0.06298255368676513,0.09341635821142467,0.12927664621904525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094715654182795,0.05598900763960982,0.0,0.2023922682199013,0.10141963322407846,0.0,0.1282109175170066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649807905942653,0.0,0.23026729117140365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157517444817767,0.0,0.0,0.2744239395897413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996421893028796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13446137713053255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975754522165854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341731564933991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480039755826694,0.12881804601969107,0.0,0.0,0.09710235225360324,0.088226627006679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098160804654642,0.06682565718513145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519108356000326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209454997393514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Merxuer,2020/01/14,"Need help! Hey. 

I have never opened up to anyone how I really feel, and there's a lot that I need to get off my chest. I'm not good at expressing myself in writing, but I'm gonna give it a shot. 

I'm currently battling depression (had it for almost 4 years now.) There have been periods when I have contemplated suicide. Not really taking action on it, but planning in my head of the best ways to do it and how nice it would be if it all came to an end.

I also have low self-esteem (self-worth), social anxiety, fear of rejection, trust issues, and I'm afraid of confrontations (even harmless ones like calling my ex-boss when there was a miss in my paycheck. I flinch in harmless situations, I guess my mind is in constant alertness of a threat.

I have done some soul searching for the last 6 months trying to find the root cause of all these problems. And I find that all of these problems go back to my childhood.

I was bullied from the age of 7 to 18 (It did get a lot better from the age of 15 to 18) It involved beatings, harassing, and sometimes doing damage to my personal belongings.

I blame myself for being bullied and I'm constantly angry about it, how could I let it happened.  

I dream about murdering and torturing my old bullies. If only I could turn back time, take a baseball bat and beat the living fuck out of them, after that I would make a cut in their thighs and pour battery acid in the wound. Watching them scream in agony. I feel like if my life continues this way, I will visit them and do it for real one day. 

I also dream about beating the living shit out the ones who have mistreated me as an adult. Not killing just beat the living shit out of them. 

You may think, that this anger reflects on how people perceive me? Wrong, my anger is so pushed down I come off as shy instead. Unable and afraid to let it out. 

I took up boxing, maybe I could channel my anger through it? Nope, instead, I'm afraid to hit my opponent, because of fear of letting my anger through, fear of my sparring partner disliking me and retaliation. The retaliation part probably triggers the same feeling I had as a kid, feeling of hopelessness and powerless. In some fucked up way I think if I take the beating, you will like me.

So here I am 22 years old with no friends, no prospects, unemployed, living with my parents. ",3.623239727692681,5.220612816192563,4.465866156090447,85.65473407488452,72.91684901531728,7.4410162898127865,27.792912715779238,8.07648339933343,1.7587583758813512,1815,69,362,27,36,585,233,457,0.311,0.596,0.09300000000000001,-0.9993,5,0,0,0,0,2,63.0,0,2,5,8,25,43,16,6,23,0,32,9,5,8,4,74,65,32,3,13,10,1,4,3,2,6,2,1,0,4,22,22,0,0,10,3,0,7,7,32,0,3,9,7,53,11,64,41,10,58,1,6,1,2,23,24,4,11,27,254,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245057293507106,0.0,0.0,0.13169287046523756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298907775498504,0.0,0.0,0.057573314144290975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662715295877522,0.0,0.05019306475871396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640965686302453,0.07282211744323648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407728250793582,0.09417383298697704,0.0,0.08458479152045226,0.0,0.07092772181636749,0.0,0.17795832501956527,0.0,0.19722287474653266,0.0,0.0,0.0531018163943016,0.0,0.07091842416187168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426134185290278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292787758758534,0.0,0.0,0.05438410542335863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779626591612913,0.1665322053731538,0.058822968286952375,0.0,0.0,0.1505126324452099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361487495935687,0.15224208037766354,0.08603741463019468,0.07898703164254928,0.046795127524079744,0.06906201170636317,0.0,0.0,0.09070564558275017,0.0,0.07281206892745892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845035260422339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519006814150562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08594048016924515,0.0,0.0,0.0910958578665744,0.0,0.0,0.06711724067777276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525914905993298,0.05815844132462416,0.12067996782380795,0.0,0.2908272349194223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14000327581558272,0.0,0.0,0.054961894061407515,0.0,0.0827205507561724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313887572028207,0.0,0.0657221709838776,0.0,0.0,0.12210658858517745,0.0635048807040733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17280177173884534,0.0,0.1673850273512895,0.06262248814967937,0.0,0.0,0.0914276690727637,0.08916506800438546,0.0,0.05708346626809292,0.07189520245684439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08877532343398979,0.15757452601562685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371976087781304,0.1054968902384406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717949820068775,0.0,0.16903951497744266,0.0,0.0925524390361712,0.0,0.0839341988334699,0.0,0.0,0.08143533519548013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006545626527211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572594837539347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551895959988412,0.0,0.0,0.04801250875776781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148161235387448,0.0559027478385999,0.08956114244188519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19607049769093995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698246716276645,0.09002472515359612,0.0,0.1060471791584872
mentalhealth,hakaitos,2020/01/14,"Looking for a mood tracker and food diary app. So I'll start by rattling off that I have high functioning autistic spectrum disorder, generalised anxiety disorder, OCD (obsessive thoughts), bipolar affective disorder and bulimia, oh and I also struggle with a lot of self harm.
I'm aware I haven't got the best hand of cards from life but anyway I digress.

I guess this would be the sub of experts on the topic so my question really is there some kind of app that can track mood, diet and a few misc things all in one go? I've been unable to find one so far. :/",3.1192660550458733,5.327832165137618,4.358247706422016,83.23021559633028,75.97247706422019,8.029724770642202,29.24862385321101,8.841846274778883,2.6125258715596336,442,20,83,10,10,145,83,109,0.153,0.8270000000000001,0.02,-0.8859999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,2,6,0,7,5,1,1,1,15,14,9,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,5,2,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,2,3,2,6,2,12,9,5,7,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,4,1,53,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447803329825387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384976972468227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18999386753951766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6224742268690094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16547037790666205,0.0,0.21891838492555016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289113026335013,0.0,0.1447969370200704,0.0,0.1994397042827496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19128228072565456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18852883020758796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787629992387736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203085003619066,0.0,0.0,0.1539166153765081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24535937200546745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20281002969796486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598103104127835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188867739094885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12814344274387382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18926585918930894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027718324803632,0.0,0.0,0.14372822833010776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860802934214238,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,some_guy_over_here_,2020/01/14,I’m done I’m just so fucking done. I’m so unbelievably angry at myself and just at the world. What the fuck did I do to ever deserve any of this shit. I just push away the few people I have left who give a fuck a I can’t hurt myself or do drugs or anything because that would hurt the few that are left. I wish I’d never been born. Fucking kill me,-0.2511538461538443,1.5179335641025666,2.1304487179487204,97.15413461538462,85.15384615384616,4.412820512820511,17.442307692307693,5.148860815047168,-0.7659538461538462,270,6,66,1,8,92,50,78,0.307,0.662,0.031,-0.9781,0,0,1,0,0,3,5.0,0,0,0,0,7,8,6,0,6,0,10,6,1,0,2,10,19,5,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,8,0,0,4,0,8,0,5,14,2,10,0,2,0,4,2,6,5,2,3,46,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105678741079006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379904593027053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15276017503913325,0.0,0.0,0.09911433974520648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327753467114477,0.0,0.0,0.1885546546673138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470734248503178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6012533146005646,0.0,0.15597269318618096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34811537458602804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988353270261706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3533125321587665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254006774011462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127205540591652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16689795690280582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869723337920373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550041873653435,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YuperGuy,2020/01/14,"How do I tell my parents about my mental issues? So I am 16, which means I can’t legally get treatment from a doctor on my own and I require my parent’s consent. The only issue is that every time I try and tell them, they refuse to let me get treatment. I’ve had them make me take a shit load of multivitamins to try and fix it, they’ve made my take a lot of essential oils, and they plan to take me to an herbalist in about a month. Or at least, those are my mother’s solutions. My father just calls me arrogant for it. I understand that they are trying to help, but how do I get them to understand that I need to see a doctor or psychiatrist for it?",3.506666666666668,3.8290444492753655,5.182753623188408,85.21514492753623,71.89855072463769,8.162318840579712,25.47826086956522,8.167268648758528,1.3084434782608696,506,14,113,7,9,173,81,138,0.051,0.902,0.047,-0.3632,2,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,6,2,6,1,1,0,7,0,9,3,1,4,0,19,22,10,0,1,4,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,25,0,17,19,3,5,0,0,1,0,15,3,1,3,2,80,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15416425639619416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090624315272968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720451787065715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366375372704819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119660818827514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315161237956829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15438407045952612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835512914623148,0.0,0.14285795735621118,0.10077822778469953,0.0,0.0,0.16445806317541958,0.0,0.0,0.152149166827254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050829089911046,0.0,0.0,0.11194743020228504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482470688040584,0.0,0.0,0.3352838768381829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030901202768593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549755793166308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3405474329176607,0.0,0.2639208640433729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803582239540625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075101368872712,0.0,0.0,0.3143444757948637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kcma14,2020/01/14,THINKING OF DYING EVERYDAY I do not feel anything anymore. It's like I'm in the void.,-0.6366666666666667,1.4807531111111132,2.483333333333338,87.94500000000002,101.22222222222223,4.622222222222223,28.222222222222207,6.42735559955562,1.7237555555555557,68,4,13,1,3,24,17,18,0.0,0.848,0.152,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5196121056777635,0.0,0.0,0.4311616388513459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5437716182605263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649220563585229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559727924940058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33572244719122224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garb_zilla,2020/01/14,"How should I tell my boss about my bipolar disorder, depression, and anxiety? I am a 23 yo m, just graduated college this past May and began my career in July (6 months ago). In June I was diagnosed with Bipolar 2 disorder, depression, and anxiety by a new psychiatrist, and henceforth was prescribed an SSRI and an Anti-psychotic as medications. 

These medications greatly improved the quality of my life within a matter of days, especially compared to a different SSRI my previous (and first) psychiatrist prescribed me which did not work for me at all. For reasons I can’t explain, I started missing some days of my medicine before altogether stopping and never following up with my psychiatrist’s office.  Once I made this inexplicable choice to take myself off these meds, my mental illness symptoms have returned in full force and are horribly impacting my overall relationship with work.

I feel myself beginning to spiral, but I am not too far in that I cannot turn things around. I just have to act now. I have a great job in my dream city and I don’t want to squander this opportunity. I have decided the best thing to do is be up front with my boss, although he is a very tough read and I have no idea how he will respond. Anyone have suggestions as to how I can approach this? Thank you",6.862250000000002,7.682349058333332,7.710833333333337,68.27750000000002,64.66666666666666,11.066666666666665,37.25,10.93419730881044,4.4430749999999986,1034,51,174,28,15,347,147,240,0.095,0.7929999999999999,0.11199999999999999,0.9033,2,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,5,9,9,0,0,10,0,23,8,0,7,2,39,35,17,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,0,0,10,15,0,1,5,2,0,4,7,4,0,1,5,1,31,5,31,26,4,32,0,3,0,0,8,13,0,2,15,133,41,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290503788567032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21213404917024348,0.0,0.0,0.09694744461163604,0.0,0.0,0.1234280748148176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798110933978805,0.0,0.14550483235416173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788358193437197,0.0,0.2388384306363344,0.14072703587896326,0.0,0.14485995029433688,0.3178102858382099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07010570781110909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793579049959978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30572467309072376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15651920084429985,0.0,0.0,0.13758893083374651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979327376375672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119417300659975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15400911732875305,0.27935098238223754,0.1397267921574192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066926797452327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693558285001384,0.13390922851693046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765793946079134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235730585408126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13868772213505726,0.0,0.0,0.14255549921969154,0.0,0.14885842793726986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813732619477482,0.0,0.0,0.1159177767333828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144110647490845,0.10424769623846347,0.0,0.12118638729735468,0.1276504772268302,0.0,0.0,0.18422606593758845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15081160473893787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11440093679646422,0.0817794811012224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20187799590149386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zeke_png,2020/01/14,"I’m eating myself to death and I don’t know how to stop it. If anybody can, please help. In 2016 I weighed at my heaviest, 220 pounds. I hated the way I looked, I didn’t do anything but sit in my room and I would eat excessively because it made me feel better. It was horrible and it made me feel even worse about myself than I already did. Fast forward to 2017, I found some good friends who made me feel important and I committed myself to work out and eat healthier. I started losing weight rapidly and got down to a fairly healthy 170 pounds. I felt good and I held my head high and felt good enough about my body to take of my hoodie sometimes and just wear a t shirt around my friends, they commented on how they didn’t think they had ever seen me without a hoodie on before and even told me that I had a pretty good body which made me feel so happy. That summer, I stayed at that weight for a while, but I realized that I was out of JR high and I’m all of a sudden facing high school. People at school are brutal, I’m stressed, my best friends split off to different schools, and here I was, exactly how I felt before. I very VERY quickly fell back into my old habits, eating myself to death, gaining weight as rapidly as I did before, wishing I could kill myself and just be done, the year now is 2018 and I’ve lost my self respect and my pride, my girlfriend gave me some more confidence but stress from my parents was only making things worse at home. I gained more weight and was back to about 200 pounds. 30 pounds back already. The year now is 2019 and I’m in the same habits, I’m happier now and things have calmed down, my friends and I are on good terms now and we get together frequently. The issue is, I can’t get rid of it. I’m constantly craving the stimulation from the food and I don’t know what to do about it. It takes over my mind and forces it down my throat. I want to say no but I can’t, I can’t control it and I hate it. I hate seeing myself in the mirror, I hate seeing people with good bodies and the way they look at me, I hate seeing any of it. I just want to have myself back. I want to be healthy, I want to be skinnier, but I can’t stop it. I need help but people always give the same answer. “You’re perfect how you are, accept yourself!”

That fake shit drives me nuts. I look like jabba the hut after he’s been bloated from an all you can eat Chinese buffet and I muffin top every pair of jeans I have. I’m sick of it and all I want, all I ever wanted, was to be confident. And it scares the shit out of me that my best days might already be behind me. I’m currently at my new record. 224 pounds. All my progress was destroyed and I’m worse than when I started, 4 years ago. 

If anybody knows what I can do about this, or has any experience, please share.",2.2055428858290296,3.7055770309810687,3.3068728485370045,92.91278202094091,76.4526678141136,6.1497561675272525,21.914837923121052,6.7232907121075245,0.3187306081468728,2169,57,486,19,48,698,248,581,0.157,0.629,0.215,0.9876,3,0,0,0,0,1,61.0,1,2,4,13,29,37,10,3,19,0,45,22,10,11,10,103,103,46,3,12,13,1,11,1,5,2,1,1,2,1,27,35,11,4,15,0,0,3,10,16,0,0,29,19,87,21,63,66,15,67,0,2,7,0,24,29,2,6,34,317,114,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049343879109102866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842839389589962,0.0,0.0463179412737413,0.0,0.0,0.07570854791674729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04580775185268368,0.0495538678243372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17121254286493548,0.0,0.03393301535540943,0.0,0.14210106509635034,0.0,0.11683447612868172,0.049231383684053116,0.0,0.18549460781840715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06015435204585196,0.06243330313143339,0.04444416686769613,0.0,0.0,0.03589947654661079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058158331001237164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05696486996175231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847972012267444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05751707608777264,0.0,0.07353273577902622,0.1007047980473452,0.046900367895932604,0.0,0.0,0.054451288798109884,0.0,0.0,0.11258407728761714,0.0,0.1603420877415685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731063257184823,0.06103406557149546,0.1720273140686073,0.0,0.05816558374788763,0.05339917318237709,0.0,0.28013618793428674,0.044520579797816234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05925668607015295,0.0,0.2747895143570473,0.057128598553638776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462247777514619,0.17644015581160494,0.05583677721237256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05810005121729439,0.0,0.0,0.06158534368563363,0.0,0.09177648504180616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02719522588058116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023435295101316,0.06227516809504668,0.06076518818679912,0.0,0.0,0.21068719473251651,0.037156981828338015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059052025923928164,0.05620602686864287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041275072217403785,0.0,0.05376183838517033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05841130843517785,0.0,0.0,0.04233592553457502,0.0,0.0,0.06180966461141976,0.0,0.0,0.1157738113857001,0.0,0.0,0.12220744130972552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056631563961370285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0442672353276799,0.055730618940385335,0.16900859267019908,0.133073974566659,0.0,0.058070988396953835,0.0,0.11427914364214428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055054348503025,0.0,0.07880029074723803,0.05933174234716486,0.0,0.09307727103991888,0.12752869514831627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370666994754597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739630277387502,0.035668039933426016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05319052499364151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185931012045204,0.1969968147026314,0.08836895748941583,0.0,0.27114107779167795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401228207655778,0.053659307657193366,0.0,0.04052495974094116,0.0,0.17018291413714076,0.039542991383672,0.0,0.0,0.1075397739532752
mentalhealth,psychoticbuttocks,2020/01/14,"Help for my Grandpa Hey guys, going through a problem right now and hoping for some answers or a correct direction. Anyways, so my grandpa has some pretty bad dementia, we had to call the cops multiple times the earliest being today, he’s at the hospital or something not sure. They told us to pick him up tomorrow bc they can’t rly do much and idk all of my siblings are scared when he has his outbursts, my dad and uncle have to restrain him a lot, he leaves the house w some weird shit and we always have to drag him back and all that. He hasn’t hurt anyone but it has gotten a little forceful multiple times. He wants nothing to do w my grandma and vice versa. So I’m just thinking of options of what to do, 1. Caretaker; we’re scared he might slap or hit him/her during his outburst and we don’t want a lawsuit so that’s prob not going to happen. 2. Fly back to India; he just came back from a 1-2 month trip there w my grandma and she says he still acted the same and embarrassed her in front of family and friends so I don’t think that’ll help. 3. Old person living community; won’t work bc he’s just too loco for that just to be frank and he doesn’t speak a lot of English so that’s off the table too. I’m trying to think of a solution but I just can’t find anything. Any help from someone who has experience with this or maybe not but still have an input, please reply :)",2.025208333333332,3.721129270833334,3.6527999999999987,89.39220000000002,77.47222222222223,6.413555555555559,23.672777777777767,7.24861992348623,0.8779842777777778,1082,35,231,13,25,360,161,288,0.087,0.809,0.10400000000000001,0.8346,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,4,0,2,1,21,11,1,3,15,0,23,1,1,1,4,54,38,24,0,4,15,3,0,0,1,3,0,2,0,2,9,16,0,1,5,0,0,6,10,8,0,0,4,2,21,3,27,28,9,25,0,1,0,0,38,6,1,12,13,145,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061468178036894,0.0,0.0,0.08675063291788382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919853064840852,0.0,0.10497761679792114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2942758155924409,0.10651397410333732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302612186233278,0.1459038384852116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247860088830365,0.12025978268044063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659486567413445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985587412865574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14499969920757866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12631240303958907,0.11280798505923778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25651847862727223,0.0,0.0,0.1267038348934628,0.0,0.14719637565516164,0.13656421142868955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13507612132339972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785667647126486,0.11264490507849445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21690754951879349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815922952403708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532951733844706,0.0,0.0,0.10182358215636376,0.0,0.0937771780793233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240496252529336,0.0,0.13386118518309342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138748073018973,0.0,0.14003138578951246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978254508806236,0.0,0.1220653734904636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089423981183144,0.0,0.10144721535074257,0.255435699086463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13094674661005845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10808797538274856,0.0982080996667822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20375198244701995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202313558303928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452213223717579,0.0,0.0,0.1487718849466791,0.0,0.12091957354710507,0.12189671669590164,0.0,0.0866103166115211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344862955704194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048585510716606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928710430522136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i_want_t0_d1e,2020/01/14,"Why do I love hurting myself I really don't understand why I still cut. I started when I was in a really dark time, super lonely with no hope. I tried to kill myself several times by putting a loaded gun to my head but never followed through with it. Now, i'm actually happy. I have alot of friends, an awesome supportive girlfriend, and things are going well for me in life.

The one issue, every day I want to cut myself. I get home and I just get this feeling, he thought comes into my mind and I can't push it away. Always my left wrist, recently i've been considering expanding. 

The worst part is, I don't want to stop. I'm okay with the pain and honestly, after cutting myself it makes me HAPPY to look at arm and see what i've done... it also relieves stress when i feel overwhelmed. I don't know what's wrong with me. Please if someone has an explanation i need to know.

I'm worried that if people find out about my self harm it will ruin every relationship I have",2.5585846521349644,4.359515040609138,4.263421916990147,85.13588533890716,76.25888324873097,7.071842340997312,24.27859062406689,7.928766900206844,1.3309285756942375,761,25,154,12,17,256,127,197,0.179,0.5760000000000001,0.245,0.9401,1,2,0,1,0,4,24.0,0,0,0,1,9,24,4,2,8,1,14,6,3,1,1,32,38,11,1,6,4,0,2,0,2,1,2,0,1,1,10,12,0,1,7,0,0,5,6,13,1,1,4,4,27,11,22,33,3,24,0,4,2,1,6,7,0,4,12,101,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.1268510538905451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395259970187412,0.10816172251950787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212946536751425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197449106690993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383250883025385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302444557603751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21904361199657196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13145324892280624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188080977761228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004296072881241,0.0,0.13582835412183772,0.0,0.07387605938459471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27675259564176924,0.0,0.0,0.1334067848173149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13039012177883855,0.12910895790818447,0.0,0.0,0.13915650650934466,0.0,0.0,0.13567532246293615,0.0,0.0,0.14381418240560712,0.0,0.14287771917207778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123403121637865,0.0,0.09181546653126456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091584870028848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732064799073202,0.0,0.08676903695755436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13125239410277226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638560750718077,0.10025595796681147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808428622782526,0.0,0.1383180508427657,0.0,0.0,0.1407660200420182,0.0,0.0901183898201819,0.0,0.0,0.14268949561727667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067540554308255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16654927426225394,0.0,0.128349002928282,0.13956013420917754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035848450645411,0.0,0.1356074549234285,0.14685119643351027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013972762392032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200727566761784,0.0,0.10380982607030266,0.10867708803802306,0.14890259539371056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475106059044154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635928392953776,0.0,0.0,0.10319718623151126,0.1515959090555756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825437470944571,0.0,0.0,0.13532371047404254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334241421457304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11687622053713348,0.0,0.23459070855576197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201070235172638,0.0,0.0,0.1421231716508646,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jeromeismyjoker,2020/01/14,I have to either call the cops on my dad or risk him hurting me My dad has caused so much mental pain. Last time I said “no” to him he threatened to throw me out my window. Obviously I have to call cops cause I can’t stand this anymore. I tried to convince my friend to call but he left it up to me which is gonna be impossible with my paranoia and anxiety. I don’t know how this is gonna effect me but I know I have to. I just can’t seem to,-0.4160000000000004,1.231961400000003,2.116,97.70300000000002,85.0,5.2,18.0,6.2581,-0.4625000000000004,340,8,88,3,10,117,60,100,0.146,0.815,0.038,-0.8037,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,1,0,10,1,0,4,1,16,16,6,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,0,4,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,1,20,2,13,12,2,8,0,1,0,0,11,4,0,2,2,58,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15241309875833708,0.0,0.19758611786132652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6103191038322741,0.0,0.0,0.40933541632746856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539273246291083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21328360560312032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21898706621615613,0.1624019115123317,0.0,0.0,0.21646780425369525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20078052962807105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14645956253691006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21199851407422132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895167031341596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18137471544883305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161746686845888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13526648318823234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gemini-Gall,2020/01/14,Feeling bad and anxious about taking a mental health day I had college this morning which I have been stressing about for weeks cause the course work has been getting overwhelming. It’s currently 6:26am and I’ve been up since yesterday with stomach pains and headaches that I usually get when I’m stressed. My town has been flooded recently and was recommended I traveled anyways so that was my excuse when I emailed the college but I always feel so bad when I call a sick day! My attendance isn’t the best which is cause I love two hours away cause I’m too anxious about staying in a big city so trains are never reliable but they always make you feel like such a burden cause I can’t get in.:( I’m gonna of course go back to bed get some rest I need and sit and do some work but I just needed a bit more time to do what I need to do,3.491133603238868,4.850342935672514,3.962222222222224,90.08384615384618,72.85964912280701,7.132883490778228,27.188933873144396,7.61054688173877,1.334498515519568,666,24,142,8,13,209,104,171,0.14300000000000002,0.75,0.107,-0.6476,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,3,14,10,0,3,8,0,17,5,1,5,1,25,35,15,0,3,4,0,3,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,7,7,0,0,3,1,0,3,3,7,0,1,7,3,17,3,13,27,6,25,0,1,0,1,6,6,0,2,15,89,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20377781067035494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766691820957801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11504659176652983,0.09415713486196227,0.20448266747590188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285045983348685,0.0,0.1336845990155656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503599493395076,0.0,0.0,0.5031629590569746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579413189296355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18574446657524807,0.08747890209264443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25590203248578697,0.0,0.06959163228761761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015951318518826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058940815148796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059823293503897236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11051666077926442,0.0,0.08173688423830584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12340164249050276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27238723118157115,0.09444163399603436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302963235068951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090542850651753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129259735981044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305162991518496,0.0,0.0,0.2805340390819996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09206778988516506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140206751135049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961667449936698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348622967274492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822267495362436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17829133477042006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,llmstudent21,2020/01/14,"How much does diet affect depression? Hello.

I have moderate to serene depression and i usually have it under control. I am very active and have been taking medication and therapy.

For a month or so I haven’t been eating right, lots of junk food. I know diet does affect depression but I feel like I’ve regressed in all my progress from therapy. 

I feel like a failure even though I’ve gotten into a top law school. I miss the ex that broke up with me a year ago and I am having self harming thoughts. 

Is diet really this important to depression?",2.2265723270440283,4.8683292358490595,4.107830188679248,81.3446383647799,82.11320754716981,7.684276729559751,23.927672955974842,8.59863814320734,2.1614616352201264,433,16,78,11,12,146,73,106,0.225,0.616,0.159,-0.8748,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,4,9,0,0,5,0,10,6,0,4,1,19,17,9,0,0,2,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,6,5,1,4,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,4,2,11,2,10,13,3,10,0,6,0,0,3,6,0,2,6,52,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996508125240886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17709354236876942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5439816125569886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763513205962683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615668007049989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428867291996777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596737002622665,0.2256015522220851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19092820279165645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867753908411791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542798040517637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423734495211664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590633859266267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260309044337778,0.0,0.11607156533184194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115207921968432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348421325911657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15979895806418806,0.0,0.0,0.16471973335164708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187179754825507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611351682222422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15513180124786874,0.12535161144564774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17389989328927713,0.1302805539099523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167970489953576
mentalhealth,emoteenhoe,2020/01/14,"I don't know what to do so I came here to vent. Its so fucking weird feeling like the cards are stacked against you when, objectively, they shouldn't be. I [18F] am relatively pretty, doing great academically, currently financially stable.. yet somehow i'm still fucking miserable.

I have severe anxiety and depression which slips into awful social skills. I'm very poor at interacting with others and trauma from past relationships/friendships make me fear even attempting at doing so. I'm very lonely, and it's because finding friends and an s/o are extremely stressful and difficult for me. The lack of support and people to confide into in turn make it really hard for me to have any motivation or even believe I'm capable of being loved. I feel like i'm completely on my own at all times.

I also am trying to graduate with my AA for my senior year. And the 5 college courses + the part time job i'm balancing has made my depression fatigue the worse it's ever been. I don't wanna get up most days and never have the motivation to do anything. I'm trying to assure myself it's the right thing, but i can't help but feel like i'm overwhelmed. The stress + lack of support + constant depressive episodes has left me lying awake every night wondering why i'm even here and why i still chose to go about my life. i feel more like a zombie at this point, more like finishing what i've started rather than doing what i'm doing because i genuinely care.

I smoke weed, do psychedelics, drink, and have nicotine addiction all to cope with the copious amount of stress and negativity in my head but all it does is make me feel even sadder. in introduces me to a feeling of euphoria and happiness i only ever get to feel short term, and then i get sober and realize my life is much lonelier and bleaker. I even do things i've always wanted to do to boost my happiness and self confidence like getting piercings and tattoos but it too is short term before i realize i still hate who i am.

I guess I don't hate myself but rather I hate my shitty brain. It tells me everyday I'm worthless and am waking up for nothing. How no one can love me. It reminds me of every traumatic thing that's ever happened to me and how it effects my everyday life and behaviors. I feel like i'm trapped in my own head and being constantly tortured. I look in the mirror daily and see nothing but a miserable shell of a person and it really just makes want to die.

I really don't know what i'm living for. And I really don't know what went wrong. I mean I do, but why so fast and so horribly? and how come i can't fix it no matter how hard i try?",4.229101929487825,5.51545980038388,5.6565294474189285,78.92802884129709,70.95777351247601,9.015880391958783,29.25755126780483,9.414487439383343,2.6505669865643,2080,81,397,46,38,702,247,521,0.21100000000000002,0.639,0.15,-0.9912,2,3,2,0,0,1,48.0,0,1,1,5,31,40,6,7,15,1,38,14,4,12,8,90,95,46,1,8,11,0,10,7,1,1,5,0,0,2,25,33,1,0,19,1,1,4,12,23,1,1,4,12,54,17,49,87,15,50,0,9,2,4,12,19,2,5,34,263,79,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312316878332978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05364096692959648,0.055812932022444764,0.0,0.0,0.045614247116710256,0.0,0.0513132567441883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519815583220413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177829269893462,0.0,0.057077069694344035,0.07557212475354562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487943763848395,0.0,0.07671752378153565,0.06838885266472168,0.0,0.0,0.05778037287671819,0.07032832146117428,0.14497150215494262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04325872413662858,0.0,0.173318395979692,0.0,0.069614705523983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05869900318563565,0.0,0.0,0.06570932850036157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215166235046957,0.18202331191273075,0.11302950749615208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07547959002417069,0.2713267161563498,0.2395969413859813,0.0,0.0,0.061306607646700075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05182305453393585,0.12402208821147802,0.14017858663364746,0.0,0.038121059691655856,0.0,0.0,0.07395195964391131,0.07389220871021017,0.0,0.059315432454550364,0.14280813441005738,0.12017454524994495,0.19867215247736333,0.13767946069828532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04495989205128818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656296960008005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059029352414683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287869682469114,0.0,0.14213411933766892,0.22939096086031904,0.0,0.059229683563836726,0.0,0.05632727616432055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107812632061048,0.0634693045191109,0.17909605167360507,0.0,0.0,0.07306585566162765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04930886647094612,0.0,0.05173344910291641,0.0,0.0,0.06294665057730486,0.0,0.1287232155234076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04545269957763934,0.0510146191516525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263719664096753,0.06403200659040842,0.04650232492459455,0.058568518762786424,0.0,0.0,0.06340887201477867,0.0,0.0,0.06824080567442248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718834187595367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0572828727827228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053451200493778994,0.0,0.0699753063012933,0.07577723110391422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837593512819347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047477015923825694,0.0,0.1607018813336289,0.0,0.2305073432935351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15223499086653108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05862772364562095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336877242112239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822556788029653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662140269964534,0.07295985367970509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069009740914454,0.07912678849185244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621804879514551,0.18157803377287787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274148648927012,0.0,0.0,0.06835657455773446,0.0,0.07333750548150983,0.0,0.04319499764961817
mentalhealth,Bschena123,2020/01/14,"Breaking the Stigma: Evil Little Voice Hi everyone, I’m kinda new to all of this. I have suffered from issues with mental health in the past. Specifically depression and anxiety. When it was at its worst I felt like I couldn’t rely on anyone and that nobody wanted me around or I was crazy and I would be a burden to everyone. I began to isolate myself and things just got worse. Luckily, one day I was feeling so down I decided to open up to one of my roommates about it. Once I did that I felt like a weight had been lifted off my shoulders. I continued to talk with her and eventually worked up the courage to go see a psychologist. The reason I told this story is because I feel like there is a stigma still involved with mental health. People feel like they can’t talk about their issues because they will be judged. In response to this major issue I thought I would make a YouTube channel to help break the silence. All I’m going to do is talk about my own experiences and some of the coping mechanisms I use. I’d like to make a very important note: I AM NOT A MENTAL HEALTHCARE PROFESSIONAL! So please take everything I say with a grain of salt. The real goal here is to provide people some support with the ability to remain anonymous. I want to talk about how I eventually came to terms with my difficulties and hopefully this can encourage people to do the same. If you’re interested in my channel I’ll post a link to my video. I apologize in advanced for the poor video quality lol ;). [Ending the Stigma: Evil Voice](https://youtu.be/ALzytpcUqb0)",4.646918587686024,6.382108080536916,5.4207615990662426,79.27540560256787,70.54362416107381,8.404085205719289,28.392763349868694,8.964715089967882,2.382840501896704,1240,46,225,24,23,403,170,298,0.11699999999999999,0.726,0.157,0.7490000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,3,3,13,16,2,0,20,1,22,4,1,5,2,46,45,13,0,7,4,0,6,5,0,3,2,2,0,0,10,16,1,0,9,4,1,4,3,6,0,2,13,10,33,10,44,26,9,29,0,2,1,0,15,13,0,6,14,156,43,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923332593620891,0.0,0.0,0.07242089148481512,0.0,0.0,0.09220223646070892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262747003610378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184603151794634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679623954077403,0.0,0.0892075708483474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173524205592597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979375406302536,0.09308504463017847,0.10131460622107008,0.0,0.0,0.15710938678764644,0.1479856376670484,0.1988933086038688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772623837307845,0.0,0.08283706612847057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201872462544576,0.0,0.0,0.06942303036261581,0.0,0.0,0.10287170215503004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243109910031282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530035249854154,0.10380770204424652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827202497481367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31313271513932905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003178264356184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030223285821283,0.1403679590352086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887247799959463,0.2154141503380137,0.0,0.0,0.11369243104131226,0.0,0.0,0.09919463482392693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788914245069475,0.0,0.10649064945352668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236568159751273,0.0,0.0,0.08253454680373425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827138076342004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753380525384198,0.0,0.0,0.07787426607345134,0.33299332780750834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880952862340399,0.0,0.0,0.08222566719804822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989687703151268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945411604641389,0.0,0.0854588572466976,0.12218048552473693,0.0,0.0,0.12612443219054684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540262919214304,0.0,0.10555008774470673,0.14715106618299034,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,txhsizndhsismshelpme,2020/01/14,"I think I need to check myself into a psych ward. Hi, I’m 13, and incredibly disturbed by my mental health.

I’ve been thinking about murder a lot for a while, and committing murder, and recently it progressed into committing a school shooting. While I don’t have access to firearms, it was still disturbing.

I have “episodes” of false beliefs, ranging anywhere from thinking the voice in my head that disappeared was controlling everything I heard and felt (3 months), to thinking everyone around me was a puppet of an unknown entity (only a few seconds, thank the lord).

I am currently on antidepressants, and my very bad depression has gotten better.

I have auditory hallucinations fairly regularly, and as a a person, I’m fairly paranoid. I look over my shoulder all the time because I think there’s something behind me, even in a locked room, with a closed door, in a locked house. 

My peers for the most part ignore me, or laugh at me. 

I think I need to call the cops on myself, or check myself into a psych ward, or anything to get me away from people. I don’t want to hurt them.

What should I do?",6.922391304347826,7.111193376811593,7.155857487922707,74.48277173913046,64.5072463768116,9.991787439613526,33.19202898550725,9.725611199111238,3.1239826086956533,867,33,155,16,12,281,125,207,0.162,0.775,0.063,-0.9737,1,0,1,2,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,3,5,11,2,2,18,0,13,3,2,1,3,34,30,12,2,4,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,2,1,4,12,0,2,8,0,2,1,2,8,0,1,7,5,27,3,29,22,5,22,2,2,1,0,5,14,0,5,7,111,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12440047091110785,0.13457382743076465,0.0,0.0,0.14202969519853745,0.0,0.12622108351512035,0.0921521558888614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336980547222126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15436201956641904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16955061088926235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302029615081954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998467135836641,0.0,0.0,0.14444992582255262,0.1358623306039311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451474216712566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898036594686958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15514458307012371,0.16068721116396026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744305024866315,0.161831185823505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694517732227092,0.0,0.0,0.1285197841567246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234434502408256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066287992125925,0.0,0.0,0.22418207456449096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497200495444483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16370295948414978,0.0,0.10480261580959976,0.13199628148456835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14926266736764898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529926534691575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637846446209905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12072498566181487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917751953557914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5811838544442048,0.0,0.0,0.08814875546911125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473152440774332,0.08916429907543354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HalPal78,2020/01/14,"I feel I’m mediocre at everything and It really upsets me when I get into deep thought about it. (Vent kind of) TL;DR included Ok so this is my first actual deep thought reddit post so please bare with me and cut me some slack, thank you.

I grew up in a family where my two sisters were varsity basketball and softball starters since their freshman year, my cousin is the captain of the girls basketball team and is a beast on the court, my other cousin on the other side of my family is an all American elite baseball player who is just a freshman in high school and is already a starter in basketball. My mother was a 4 year starter in her high school for basketball and my father was a multi title winning football running back and starter for 3 years. Then there’s me.

I feel like my entire family has hidden talents that we’re just given to them, but I’ve yet to find mine I guess. I didn’t really do sports in my first 2 years of high school, I tried out track and field and didn’t really do anything there, yes I am a big video gamer but I really don’t think I fit in there even. I finally got to start in football my senior year as a lineman, and my junior year of football I was just junior varsity. My starting year went great but flew by quickly, and before I knew it I was back to my normal average life trying to figure out what I’m actually good at. I tried playing baseball again my junior year but I just got harassed and made fun of by the seniors and even sophomores and freshmen on the team, but I’m still considering going out again and trying to work into being the junior varsity catcher, I believe it’s something I’d enjoy but I’d be lucky to even get to play junior varsity because it’s a new skill I’d have to learn in a short amount of time as a senior in high school. 

I’m in an awkward spot body wise to go out for sports on college level, I’m 6’2 250 but not packing a ton of muscle but enough to start in football as a lineman, too slow for track and field and basketball, and I just don’t have the edge and mental knowledge and quickness to be an efficient baseball player, and honestly no matter how much time I’ve sunk into a video game I’m always getting my butt handed to me and I never find myself on top or any better than I have been before. I just feel average and I hate it, maybe all those family members of mine worked hard for their talent but as I grow up I do know it seems it just naturally came to them, and I guess that’s what I’m looking for too, but I’m a senior in high school and I’m really running out of time to truly find and practice it. Also I tried piano for a year and I got to a point where I just couldn’t get the hang of it as the music got harder. Maybe I’m lazy and just not willing to put in work for a talent to naturally come to me, but I have gone out for sports and put my self in tough situations and got through them, but I got through them not as a great player or performer, just the average, barely good or normal performance. Am I alone in this situation? Am I one of the only people on the internet who are trying to find what they are “good at?”

TL;DR My family all have talents that were handed to them and I’m struggling to find my talent. I honestly don’t have anything that I consider or others consider I’m “good at”. Does anyone else feel or experience this? I’m 17, am I just too young to be finding it yet? Or am I just unlucky and not as gifted as the rest of my family, I’m not bad at sports and activities I’m just mediocre and average and when I try to work harder and progress to get better I just reach a stump or dead end.",5.139096088935683,4.771823435419448,6.305283497971697,80.96409872108508,68.30758988015978,9.329588455702476,29.449137583996528,8.907891778443368,2.146791942526245,2844,90,594,44,43,960,285,751,0.048,0.795,0.157,0.9979,0,1,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,1,8,19,41,34,3,3,37,2,41,5,4,2,4,119,94,70,1,3,38,5,7,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,27,48,0,0,19,11,0,14,13,8,0,4,24,8,76,26,99,64,9,111,0,0,1,1,23,53,1,12,44,395,103,22,0.0,0.0,0.10668941988908198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056615982103873336,0.0603236841394437,0.04371521646057666,0.045485280081974416,0.0,0.0,0.037173764764725205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03822272050535671,0.05601028576353025,0.08996852475073748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406732090847092,0.04564261129047312,0.03332299892918071,0.0,0.09303100221509897,0.061588222231768824,0.0,0.09669269462811007,0.0,0.06071998566352181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252167606954243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0470886647288401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04783731124101578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045665212501114605,0.0,0.04841656110143441,0.0564830871883277,0.0,0.10831624820074827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04912896777684634,0.05347241379250637,0.3091972050222173,0.0,0.1105601446733792,0.0390523614897822,0.0,0.059882336481873875,0.2997744198671885,0.0929952671966241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14279984144092903,0.0,0.062134240731138726,0.18340010542900112,0.26232137946903084,0.12053570651552505,0.12043831733147485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04896869463173403,0.05396992042565557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887804626061772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056924711055734274,0.03004220403777097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038611184379746685,0.02670633521382495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045904449735027865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05172491370815155,0.0,0.0,0.10983576466271147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05508900358475341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04018472996641218,0.0,0.0421606666552912,0.0527953576826536,0.0,0.0,0.10711929439198753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03704211006043123,0.041574849345937116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037897512225438405,0.0,0.0,0.06000525437025021,0.05167566366365467,0.0,0.052353522923711364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990593127583907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17509753475638956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766171870072047,0.0,0.04976454822613164,0.0570270417733352,0.0,0.0,0.04521907607099344,0.12289047667128015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042083436998775335,0.0,0.0,0.1160755377920197,0.0,0.04365517582448955,0.0,0.0,0.057147250822081816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05032776813212585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03502683283694842,0.0,0.08679508443600037,0.09562600643814738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25979546192750896,0.0,0.053399316875373484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05067458038162898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591857576944983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31681956950383905
mentalhealth,ant97335,2020/01/14,"Please HELP me I know there’s someone out there that can! I’m a mentally challenged person who has always had a rough time living a normal life. Since the age of 6 I started living with my dad who abused me and treated me like a failure. At the age of 18 he threw me out of the house. I’m currently battling depression and anxiety. I had to leave the country to find a cheap place for me to get a decent living space. However, things are not working out at the moment. My anxiety has gotten way worst due to the fact that I’m alone and risking becoming homeless in a foreign country. Please I know there’s someone out there that can help me I know that one day I will be someone and will truly be able to help others in similar situations but as of now I’m the one that needs some help. If you’re reading this please allow  me to one day be able to help others by helping me now..",3.0042307692307686,4.311914807692311,4.392087912087913,86.7279120879121,74.0,7.178021978021977,26.736263736263727,7.7094869923839395,1.4498087912087914,693,25,144,9,14,230,97,182,0.102,0.743,0.156,0.9185,2,1,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,6,7,1,1,14,0,12,1,0,1,1,21,24,7,0,3,3,1,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,11,9,0,0,4,1,1,1,1,4,0,3,4,1,16,3,23,15,2,23,0,1,0,0,11,10,0,2,12,94,27,3,0.2316337309831473,0.1372240470935194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995134411016868,0.0,0.0,0.09636890998464273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17719917019270545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791062866644776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14938459390367814,0.0,0.09975289653977693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585451685986988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06050953205450633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4657776217455268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363711290725935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909497612044087,0.0,0.0,0.1226333379203474,0.0,0.0,0.0818048772083264,0.05658227034333947,0.0,0.3068052422771947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671615999802624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587673825182783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134759379328394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354415162633845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112681968248964,0.12100397407543433,0.3813964174733442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584820718019788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580490795309443,0.1301830093489705,0.0,0.0,0.2943937628732285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197577350107108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694357916538196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675337456426971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193003699586018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431605745007625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meaningoflife411,2020/01/14,"Can I go to a psychiatrist just for a mental health evaluation? I want to go and essentially get diagnosed. I’m not really interested in taking ssris because I’ve tried them in the past and they made me suicidal. I am not anti medication and am open to it but I found some natural things that have been helping me (meditation and natural herbs like kava and Kratom). My life is severely limited but recently I’ve been making some progress. I just want to know what I have, being 25 I just want answers. I’m afraid if I go there and tell him or her I take kava and want to keep trying using those tools along with therapy, they will just laugh or not take it seriously but they actually do work. Also because I haven’t worked in five years I want to maybe see if vocational rehab services can help because I’m so desperate to get a job. I’ve applied to volunteer at animal shelters and stuff related to my degree but so far nothing has come back. I need direction, any advice is greatly appreciated, thank you.",4.359204737732656,5.943312771573608,6.303573604060914,73.26101184433166,71.03045685279187,10.12642978003384,29.88460236886633,10.355215969177356,3.377644602368866,804,33,149,24,15,280,122,197,0.07,0.725,0.205,0.9767,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,4,4,9,7,0,1,4,0,15,5,0,3,0,43,41,19,1,8,15,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,7,12,0,2,3,0,0,4,4,2,0,1,4,1,23,5,16,35,2,14,0,0,1,0,10,6,0,6,5,96,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.13074170592139342,0.0,0.0,0.1309202534347819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714093263831972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110859213431943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301963361729258,0.0,0.24501243315113536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540886364570292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359832943083546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14689828135569388,0.0,0.0,0.13999434916565426,0.0,0.22842574187108095,0.0,0.0,0.14770952837370194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241071990775114,0.0,0.0,0.17960320409643407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13295097106450218,0.11908444014186992,0.0,0.0,0.07362996273895189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463154113503873,0.06545413459730264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12677177294376965,0.08943033238632513,0.0,0.13459736924348142,0.0,0.0,0.13496719594550324,0.13501676761703854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934185302577092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855403391108364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789569796166614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582875573034601,0.0,0.1322855985937083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676189858877284,0.0,0.0,0.1513552733655753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15337100167405535,0.14654851016106055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022008899005463,0.0,0.117101337828191,0.12334753094826467,0.1532137667267665,0.0,0.08900801181234258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18192245394342507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571265167792084,0.0,0.0,0.3951139586474596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950729279529816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627645246522651
mentalhealth,crystalgabe,2020/01/14,"Feel like my future is dark and empty I'm just unmotivated in general and I feel like life is just shit for me. I feel like I was born cursed and nothing will ever be enough for me. I will never be enough for myself. I lack true connections in my life and I feel like I have no real friends, no one to talk to. The ones that feel like friends temporarily end up ignoring me and forgetting about me. I feel inadequate all the time and can't stand being photographed or filmed. I can't connect romantically with anyome and being gay just makes it more confusing. Plus being in a Latin American country and seeing the economic situation stagnate/decay just kills any other possibility of feeling motivated.
I'm an Architecture student who's creativity and productivity is constantly under the opressive force that depression is and I just want peace and progress.I just feel like things will never get better and my life will spiral into something worse every year that passes by and there is nothing I can do to stop it.

I don't care if anybody reads this nor I expect anyone to feel sympathy for me I just thought this was a good place to vent the horrible things going on in my head. Thanks",5.144664420834413,6.823836303964763,6.09606115573983,75.13991448561805,69.22026431718062,9.041616999222596,29.211972013475,9.478462496947786,2.7269069188909048,959,36,172,21,17,317,131,227,0.17600000000000002,0.653,0.171,-0.3091,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,10,18,2,1,8,0,22,6,2,2,5,51,41,17,1,4,9,0,9,6,2,4,3,0,0,0,11,16,0,2,11,2,0,2,8,5,0,2,3,10,24,13,22,29,5,22,0,1,1,1,4,9,1,3,16,123,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064096187224014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263428277876106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187211730879116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591108346508367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225578633454016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947042482021676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200554392050413,0.21466857789358304,0.0,0.0,0.09396407664609972,0.08752214093377775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4727169492048179,0.4452650512769827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051258766008136,0.0,0.054272243978704116,0.0,0.0590365619171019,0.08712838164880084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066093397189408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492620146326435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22011743127507374,0.3044988129979121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693397247430899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16023505095888385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19934850040591864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14078155930707706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853095339589036,0.0,0.0,0.11710743342115608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390664001360304,0.1182365079157416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277773842118878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662981725252728,0.0,0.11676381894516852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997076667640242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684710162362813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349362676819091,0.0,0.09563739299039288,0.0,0.0,0.13802455776047778,0.0,0.0,0.0824679486883643,0.060572405633787164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06127024780902364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586109565054937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689436689004033
mentalhealth,iwannasleeeeep,2020/01/14,"how can i help my friend  Soooo My friend has been dealing with anxiety and depression for the last three years or so it started off not so bad like her just being a bit more emotional and quiet, but after awhile she started cutting the first cuts were nothing more than red marks on the skin then things started progressing and cutting more and they started getting deeper. after about a year of just me helping her she told her mother but all her mother really did was take her to therapy but i really dont think that it helped much, i mean it got a little better but i think she really just needed her friends (which was mainly me and our other friend whos mental health also isnt amazing but dosnt go to the same school as us she helped alot though and i feel like they could relate to each other) . anyway skip one whole year and shes doing really good but just incase she falls back into that cycle of pain and suffering do yall have any tips that could help because to be honest i really didnt know what i was doing half that time she also told me not to tell my parents and i knew that i should only tell them if i really really thought something was gonna happen because if she found out that i had told my parents about what was going on with her thenshe may have lost her trust in me and i defiantly did not want that to happen and i still dont want it to. anyway im just asking because I know that shes gotten better but i would really just like some help so please if you have tips so i can help my friend even more that would be great.    remeber there are people who care about you and if your ever thinking of taking your life please call the help line they will help you in times of need remeber there ARE people who care",3.326630918656413,4.8886863484419285,4.168712059894784,87.6296848441927,73.61756373937676,6.9692027519223,21.10572642654796,7.5804360353943165,0.6732825576689598,1383,30,280,17,28,444,176,353,0.08800000000000001,0.7020000000000001,0.21,0.9952,2,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,2,6,4,5,25,25,3,0,9,0,37,4,1,1,2,64,73,34,0,13,21,4,2,3,5,6,3,1,0,0,21,17,0,0,10,0,0,3,7,8,0,4,20,4,54,17,28,42,13,28,0,3,1,0,58,8,0,8,20,212,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11625155736674625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04942796121096201,0.0,0.05560345340065311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795020784710988,0.0,0.0,0.05588990385117526,0.06068853221380735,0.13292341324014256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856708998160976,0.07935266293219885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421901425781031,0.0,0.14821341008325956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606533827095435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493454120455749,0.0626030644308061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17037141551944746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176029391278121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04800743524784515,0.06574730315942108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03675147363322573,0.05192583051865368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06182540951783744,0.0,0.07969481673146325,0.2807793717150459,0.0,0.03797465803286895,0.0,0.08261656736058069,0.060964320903495274,0.058132444800178734,0.08013493204001171,0.0,0.0,0.12854934937645418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772602383016516,0.0,0.0,0.4384700716876254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851174662655541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989101482020564,0.05924757906320681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05133922097775799,0.10652994465778423,0.0728489768041955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934373191192899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917474271247261,0.0,0.0,0.07324889339488096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053431480147999116,0.1077892906246163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974275041262773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049252907011898,0.05527984732858035,0.07734144633476829,0.0,0.16141509982388716,0.0,0.0,0.1007805787832625,0.0,0.0,0.15957153676729902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3725084811118833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356060746718728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0559560890527093,0.0,0.0,0.2057858892631288,0.0,0.05804594586981824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092994159606875,0.0,0.1270589358990498,0.0,0.08312107498699159,0.0,0.04828836065032431,0.13971990292872358,0.07141216485709735,0.05770338428132182,0.0847658479378105,0.0,0.0,0.208359500626072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743051957672987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574241776513944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114966290774643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326598504712244,0.0,0.0,0.14041932970219567
mentalhealth,fruitloops17,2020/01/14,"I failed after 2 months (TW: SH) You read the title. There are only 3 cuts but I'm so ashamed of myself. I've been feeling really depressed and dysphoric recently so it's been getting difficult fighting the urge. I'm a piece of shit aren't I? What's worse is that my best friend talked someone else out of suicide tonight (which is brilliant) but then I go and do this afterwards. She doesn't know I still have this issue with hurting myself and I intend to keep it that way, she has enough on her plate as it is. I just feel like I let her down, even if she doesn't know it...
The thing that drove me to do it was my nightmares, I've been getting them a lot recently but in my most recent nightmare my friend said something that destroyed me. ""You'll never be a real man."". I know it wasn't her, but it's been replaying in my head like a time bomb, like screaming children, like an echo. Echo, echo, echo. It wouldn't stop.

At least its chilled out a bit now.",1.5024960127591704,3.4836943585858653,2.5984529505582152,94.99399521531105,80.16161616161617,5.582562466772993,22.54226475279107,6.5966054737557815,0.3820969696969696,745,24,166,7,19,237,120,198,0.205,0.645,0.151,-0.9384,0,0,1,0,2,2,31.0,0,2,1,2,7,17,4,1,9,0,21,2,2,1,1,25,34,12,1,2,6,0,2,4,2,2,0,2,0,2,18,6,0,2,5,1,0,2,6,10,0,0,8,4,26,7,15,22,7,23,0,3,0,0,16,7,1,3,17,111,44,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15618781849100216,0.0,0.16248372553700285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12818699162549374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432830034557342,0.0,0.0,0.15378109164003587,0.0,0.098300758214141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15050575832606092,0.10632412426389208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22997125331095897,0.0,0.15551498047258394,0.0,0.08458347306690649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527424348907677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15932550705150916,0.0,0.0,0.15533976878280364,0.0,0.13228687081746146,0.0,0.0,0.2453790946375091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521886762750686,0.0,0.2908431240093713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652987539282168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879462186427188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147868090301935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319186035053427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488701950395485,0.16940103146350613,0.09534425747139806,0.0,0.4408547717399965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157133520035806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527717736743002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261031078630723,0.11457654324131415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885576600379286,0.12442847690615733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16279577591389632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962385175685213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988759853622431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678392294790799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813426267597794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167040291683384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,looking_for_help945,2020/01/14,"How do i deal with depression and an ever-present sense of apathy? I'm gonna cut right to the chase and say that I simply don't know what to do anymore. I'm probably gonna rant so get ready. I'm a 17 year old guy who is in grade 12 and I feel so completely empty. I have a very small group of friends but I have been slowly losing touch with the group (thanks to the addition of two assholes who hate me and clearly talk about me behind my back and try to get me out of the group) and have gotten to the point where I'm not sure I can call them my friends anymore. They talk to me less, never really call me to hang out anymore and will make plans to go to lunch when I'm literally sitting a desk away and don't invite me. Socially, school is hell but in the weirdest way. I'm not disliked but I just can't seem to connect with anyone at all. Talking to people is easy, as long as i smile and make a few jokes people don't dislike my company but I haven't been able to connect to anyone I know who I didn't meet in elementary school. All I can do is act like everything's fine because the last person people want to be around is a depressed, unmotivated person with no social life outside of school and work. And yeah, my social life really sucks. Remember in the title when I mentioned an ever-present sense of apathy? Well I truly can't find anything I enjoy doing anymore. I was never one for sports, despite being good, I never enjoyed clubs like chess club, tried ski club and enjoyed the activity but I never felt welcome with my group kind of ignoring me (and abandoning me a few times ""by accident"") even things I used to enjoy I'm finding myself doing less. Two of my best friends moved away withing two years of each other and I gotta say that really sucked. I'm still in contact with one through video games online and we used to play nearly every night. But, as time moved forward, he started getting a social life and coming online less and the whole situation sucks. I'm obviously happy that he is meeting new people after he moved and he's still making friends but I'm still angry and I don't even know at what. I'm not mad at him for having a life, but I still feel so alone that I need to be mad at something. It hurts a lot because he was one of my best friends that I would have actually trusted with anything but I am seeing him less. We used to play video games all night sometimes but now I can't even play alone for an hour because I just don't find it fun without him. The few nights he's online I have a great time and act like everything's fine because the last thing I want to do is lose the few hours that I actually enjoy. I find myself at home doing almost nothing anymore. The last few things I enjoy are reading books and listening to music.  To just put it simply, I'm losing my friends, can connect with almost no one, can't seem to enjoy anything and am just always crushed by the unwillingness to care about anything. I don't know what to do anymore. University is still 2/3rds of a year away and I'm holding out hope that it will be better but im still depressed right now. Sorry I know I wrote a full essay but i would appreciate if anyone could let me know ways to get out of a depression, or know anything i could try to find some fun again.",3.2600915032679723,4.524918681481483,4.500949891067538,86.36650980392159,73.2962962962963,7.071895424836601,25.38344226579521,7.510576382923642,1.167244880174291,2590,82,538,30,51,854,267,675,0.18600000000000005,0.6509999999999999,0.163,-0.9491,0,2,1,0,0,0,52.0,2,0,2,8,28,56,8,0,31,1,55,5,0,7,10,115,110,46,0,9,22,0,4,3,6,7,4,3,1,3,21,42,1,3,18,16,0,10,22,18,1,7,8,8,63,38,80,88,19,73,1,9,1,0,50,26,4,9,39,347,84,8,0.049652422579487265,0.0,0.0969072039790285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943945787154962,0.10284987081037712,0.0,0.0,0.041314793158775176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954511671694154,0.1041543850317172,0.0,0.20429856561166387,0.044201183020637434,0.0,0.0,0.13995025641369396,0.038179648102488785,0.0,0.12107062378932384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421430837226943,0.0439135328102345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140134985461098,0.0,0.05062395398028334,0.0,0.0,0.04277116552627135,0.052059620397720704,0.0,0.0,0.07928683835064748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051189467448892224,0.17106223524521946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838487049180362,0.08982691775597182,0.041834307514643995,0.0,0.08924879161550629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05021151348912002,0.0,0.0476741122159551,0.0,0.2269070735408617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301680311005135,0.0,0.10376536587845987,0.0,0.028218615992449982,0.04164609631644063,0.0,0.05474197118233485,0.0,0.04916370469645,0.0,0.052855927118910434,0.0,0.0490214877244464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04980542825830667,0.04931605901486637,0.09779526904383662,0.0,0.053153945307170984,0.0,0.053633136784339175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05170535739589131,0.19101371048658725,0.12142005426853415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050772966142078414,0.14028389785791293,0.07277299689479212,0.0,0.0,0.04394083151222796,0.0,0.1666450808058757,0.0,0.042212714089645824,0.0,0.0,0.09943013288756344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583180020169705,0.0,0.036816642199127766,0.1531800370722321,0.04795461913109765,0.0,0.1397863051304968,0.0,0.04764283859826034,0.0,0.05210186506067617,0.0,0.13458306621862806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376909519742965,0.08670916042637862,0.0,0.0,0.04693758841890487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0535337094722143,0.0,0.0,0.049914398783523405,0.0,0.0,0.04966585923019717,0.0,0.09542583998208938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05624651562124495,0.08480579517330865,0.0,0.07897119867504822,0.0,0.15075270740030774,0.039566552275029,0.090403401403581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055811403334298605,0.0,0.20245756777107607,0.0,0.03822486069957772,0.049107515540270805,0.05558182197402591,0.035144240261377586,0.0,0.2379149328637649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0467968206688823,0.0,0.0,0.1197262094071576,0.0,0.04571327969783316,0.0,0.0,0.0989605898402354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685818070091278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113220698256256,0.0,0.14550960624293793,0.0,0.0,0.1286512531722101,0.0,0.040968448650434884,0.05857257057458275,0.07882356382712577,0.0,0.0,0.04464349091519101,0.0,0.0,0.055435156619762116,0.0,0.047863163515794026,0.0,0.036147554995365545,0.0,0.0,0.0705433128057367,0.0,0.0,0.09592359666770922
mentalhealth,helpme123467,2020/01/14,"Is it very unhealthy, or just generally not healthy? So I go throughout my whole day not eating food to keep my “morning skinny” because I’d say I don’t have the smallest stomach unfortunately. But then when I get home and eat something, even a small things I can’t stop. I wish I had somebody to smack me every time I ate more than a few things per hour because I binge eat until i look nine months pregnant which I know isn’t healthy, but is it a therapist- worthy thing?",6.612526315789473,5.79001572631579,6.6010526315789475,81.57736842105264,65.42105263157895,8.863157894736842,34.78947368421053,7.554174236665415,2.3103263157894736,374,15,77,3,5,119,70,95,0.10800000000000001,0.826,0.066,-0.1442,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,0,7,7,2,0,0,12,14,8,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,6,1,6,2,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,2,2,13,0,4,12,3,10,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,8,49,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22343255803072615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819037879129456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5625757085564068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104440971443325,0.0,0.15440816358072126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22160404344668508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574808656128754,0.0,0.10415338350368418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18382913858498787,0.0,0.18047852106378853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289382179725267,0.0,0.0,0.10071732306125322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538959421252536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462798979585241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457392088887102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14108589084890713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321724686967025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21278409688135247,0.3652581780813961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068629471102211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512123254018338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20460816110009344,0.2107450189726462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sa3152003,2020/01/14,"15 year old stepdaughter has Schizophrenic mother I have very little experience with dealing with mental illness, much less with a member of the family, and recently (the last few months) my fiancé and I found out that the mother of his daughter is schizophrenic. We don’t know when it started but it’s gotten horrible the last few months. The daughter is 15 years old and she lives full time in a different State with the mother and her stepdad. My fiancé does not have custody of the daughter. The mother has never tried to hurt the daughter but she is harmful to herself. The mother has had several attempted suicides in the last few months. As I understand she is also not taking any medication to treat the illness. What’s more, we’re not supposed to know this information (the daughter told my fiancé in secrecy) but it’s now gotten to a point where we are very concerned. The stepdad is loving and caring but he doesn’t seem to be addressing the problem. We don’t believe the mother is getting proper treatment and we’re concerned over the safety and well-being of the daughter, but we don’t know what to do. Any advice or guidance is helpful...",4.424349415204682,6.7765286620370375,5.0686842105263175,78.97105263157897,72.56481481481481,7.32514619883041,29.423976608187136,8.20500826718156,2.3951055555555567,925,39,153,15,19,297,109,216,0.061,0.848,0.091,0.8344,1,0,0,0,0,1,22.0,4,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,21,0,20,6,0,0,1,34,34,16,1,1,9,12,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,0,7,16,0,0,7,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,5,0,16,3,21,28,7,26,0,1,0,1,28,9,0,2,16,113,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13381047129224868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950619415174306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18623984192544588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15427790063112065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13961349704130505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411731008803729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430670468574947,0.0,0.0,0.11983200168253112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394787903670152,0.12908933435445005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15014123288432735,0.0,0.0,0.0715424441545232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917840775404309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659084489462615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257662910858452,0.3348588376557349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13724399704184947,0.12091536747278765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358842100848184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13794675479648144,0.1379974208206974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3278986078931729,0.0,0.10066235965240493,0.0,0.1056120619346542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28737872139850085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129447037353128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310274928192939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520595804391114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12465971167817627,0.0,0.15469661821044206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692269959122013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14978374008110992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295744277303667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984740688188174,0.0,0.0,0.13084645313288262,0.0,0.09296930254163722,0.0,0.0,0.14255328442966886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259700372938881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312025033107984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17636221230729984
mentalhealth,Bootyboots16,2020/01/14,"Persoanality change/Amnesia? So I dont know exactly how I'm going to explain this.

About 4 years ago, I noticed a radical personality switch in myself. I was once an extremely spontaneous, outgoing and caring person. Now I am very reserved, introverted and have a lot of trouble feeling anything. This coincided with a particularly traumatic time in my life. Within the span of a month I ended a relationship of 8 years and was fired from my 'dream' job. I have a lot of trouble remembering these events though. I also seem to have difficulty recalling events that happened within the 8 year long relationship clearly - despite them taking place during all of my teenage years. My lifetime best friends feel like strangers to me, and they have noticed a change in who I am.

I have forgotten a lot of essential skills. I havent been good at cooking in 4 years - despite being extremely competent beforehand. It's like there is a ""block"" in my brain and it doesnt let me remember. I  can physically feel pressure on the inside of my brain when I think about it.

I hate the person I am now, I am incompetent and weak compared to who I used to be. If all of who I am can be wiped by psychological stress, how do I muster up the courage to do anything in life? It's so confusing...",4.294917012448131,6.336723834024903,5.756802904564317,75.25155290456432,72.07053941908714,9.301327800829876,31.96701244813278,9.766711354998122,3.3942413278008288,1008,48,184,27,20,340,134,241,0.152,0.7440000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.89,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,2,3,12,14,1,3,15,0,25,6,2,3,4,29,39,14,0,1,1,0,4,2,1,0,3,0,0,3,11,7,1,1,9,2,0,1,3,7,0,0,3,4,29,7,30,32,6,29,0,0,0,0,12,13,0,6,17,133,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292947275278112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285760279769427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19110648904443972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218561576875917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25924682107520564,0.0,0.0,0.11838759217121612,0.0,0.12283490766568808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608661757946625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028439560316885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17613460764733968,0.08295300733099313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897106239712533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599117095933382,0.09739225561389793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268064097105443,0.0,0.0,0.1146401148082656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11522681536057328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06381409668238491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187360673425948,0.16403176344403533,0.11345643317144948,0.0,0.0,0.10275865142339184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29615199053978564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268236354273997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643967587925004,0.0,0.12365932363650756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041629875275462,0.12131608730848124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24932939716667954,0.2630726772157442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570728059315837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301002666858436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730447989852637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07440218748013687,0.11408298674750746,0.0,0.06770793972064673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028659620173376,0.0,0.09580753002035558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738731947039637
mentalhealth,vzd717,2020/01/14,"Social anxiety I am a mom of 2 toddlers and happily married. I have had social anxiety for years now. Sometimes I am able to comfortably talk to people, other times I feel completely closed off. I'm  very comfortable around my family and extended family. It is when it comes to people I don't know. I don't really have ""close"" friends that live near me as I moved 2 states away from my good friends bc of my husband's work. It's been difficult to make new friends. I feel like I need a good mom friend but every time I attempt, it's like I can't open up and talk without feeling anxiety. It just seems like it is harder to make friends when you get older.",3.4933834586466186,4.786641984962408,4.8571503759398515,83.92798120300755,72.75939849624059,8.929022556390981,28.33759398496241,9.3871,2.4388351879699246,516,20,106,12,10,172,82,133,0.061,0.7,0.24,0.9712,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,2,5,13,0,0,2,0,11,0,0,2,0,19,22,7,0,1,3,3,3,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,2,3,16,12,16,20,0,19,0,0,0,0,13,8,0,1,11,61,24,1,0.1262131875865687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28965822912911704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235649570171638,0.0,0.0,0.11858144442165465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872148542644602,0.13233212587813534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634005407182867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379651211411539,0.0,0.1914515397772139,0.09016672643043197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4875599782201717,0.0,0.06594118125677076,0.0,0.0,0.2117232672069757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693634671375675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18498416454132308,0.0,0.1114485569717292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849656555099599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956387197675208,0.0,0.13414464423436254,0.0,0.0935854793539477,0.0,0.12189748305526048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17500066510032267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085539984132971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489974574299874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573169006860081,0.0,0.0,0.12482806978596647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20289075862301964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719184932259266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413909787322688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166500890535002,0.0,0.0918847037548312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127715474384921
mentalhealth,galaxyyyss,2020/01/14,"I dont know what to do Hello.  This is my first post to reddit, so bear with me.  I could be doing this wrong, I'm not sure if this is even the right place to be putting this.
Anyway, I feel I have to put this out.  I am so lost.  I'm tired and numb, I have tried countless medications, ect as well.  I see an amazing therapist, my family puts up with me and cares for me. I have a ""good"" life.  I have amazing friends that I couldnt imagine life without. They deserve the world, and I can tell this is getting too much for them.

Its getting so hard.  Why is it like this? I dont want to be here anymore, I think of ending it everyday but I dont know why I'm still here.  I am a failure at life.  Worthless, an empty shell of a human being just taking up space. I'm terrified of the world. Jobless, everyone will leave me, I'm scared.  I dont know what to do. I am sorry I am here.  I'm shaking as I'm writing this I feel unbelievabley sick.

This cant be how life will continue.",-0.33492546583850924,1.5941614619047648,2.1870600414078685,95.64475155279504,86.76190476190477,5.175983436853001,20.082815734989648,6.498293943080001,0.03756107660455532,737,23,178,8,23,253,109,210,0.2,0.741,0.059000000000000004,-0.98,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,2,2,13,14,0,2,8,0,30,8,0,1,1,24,50,11,0,4,5,0,3,1,1,2,8,0,0,1,15,6,0,0,7,0,0,4,8,6,1,1,1,4,27,8,20,40,1,19,0,2,1,0,7,9,0,1,6,121,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144649256324361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176776626016901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215291456507063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5410822122291721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222723628855583,0.0,0.0,0.07623335519093488,0.0,0.0,0.11028808167339124,0.0,0.0,0.10880703839934226,0.0,0.11671892609167163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817559257781557,0.0,0.0,0.08917266029203838,0.0,0.12060363479650492,0.0,0.0,0.09680822783839296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339301683101366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190294276644148,0.0,0.0,0.12221236719447165,0.0,0.0,0.32609624303551954,0.0563880370310765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599379379026282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162727960544944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484646145895981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058859656337904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053977888367636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34808480870348657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856744649933404,0.0,0.0,0.1155548484272456,0.0,0.0919742339910158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920245019964394,0.0,0.0,0.09217399734109424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087813187339996,0.0,0.08678094503566326,0.0,0.10088155033244832,0.0,0.0,0.13401069636183482,0.0,0.07395602321612198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265749967460594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836212435515802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807729005594806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377580667297497,0.0,0.2082959211589514,0.0,0.0,0.1112600807407262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619287924616093,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CountJeewb,2020/01/14,"How to find a therapist that you connect with Hi, so as my title says how do people find therapists who they are able to connect to and talk to. When I was younger I had one I went to for a couple weeks but it was a waste of money Bc I didn’t speak what so ever. I am a pretty closed book person when it comes to feelings and that stuff but I really feel I need someone to talk to Bc I have a lot on my mind especially with my decisions I’ve made lately. Is there any advice or tools I can use? If this is the wrong sub could someone or a mod point me in the right direction",1.5419047619047603,2.6638050952380965,3.6525714285714312,91.31742857142858,77.4126984126984,6.944761904761903,21.33015873015873,7.554174236665415,0.5344977777777777,446,11,106,6,10,153,86,126,0.066,0.894,0.04,-0.4861,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,1,0,8,1,0,0,8,0,12,0,0,4,1,25,19,14,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,8,6,0,0,5,1,1,2,1,1,0,1,6,4,15,0,15,12,1,12,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,4,5,75,23,1,0.1674378196902372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16361829954879814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386345907685178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14423285570536734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336854744832652,0.18526676276901852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15145709390590512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16932318515790748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060702676100242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18887715368866728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234964666754513,0.0,0.15843371346801335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690644667301686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241530217034012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346019994693775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608030178558627,0.1462002457757395,0.0,0.0,0.1582828602934265,0.0,0.0,0.1703444576077306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726495478397463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429909831507588,0.0,0.13315327467966584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837390425345516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19167624439793474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691603540702571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3888164278583811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461251645265985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430851926191725,0.0,0.0,0.15521653634058286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830669710019875,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ianianson,2020/01/14,"Don’t want to go to residential but I’m too depressed for school Haven’t been in school for a month because of a treatment program. I got discharged for not showing up and now idk what to do.

I don’t want to waste more of my parents insurance or have to repeat a year of high school. 

I don’t think residential will help me either.",2.2726086956521736,4.037995028985513,3.602246376811596,89.71902173913048,76.97101449275362,6.339130434782609,25.99275362318841,7.1686216300943375,1.067510144927537,263,10,57,3,6,86,45,69,0.14400000000000002,0.7659999999999999,0.091,-0.6808,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,8,14,3,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,5,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,13,11,2,8,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,4,38,6,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14807915391092094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20922293342851936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380545883027869,0.0,0.19428187324452773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16282127090598525,0.2566537703260577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19389299137769625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697291338041301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7375309604570387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556505697970836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865559430226293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564297442277859
mentalhealth,juicebox275,2020/01/14,"Is this depression or a physical illness Lately i’ve been losing my appetite, i can barely make myself eat and when i do i sometimes gag. I feel physically fatigue, i don’t have desire to read or watch movies or do anything i used to. I go to work but feel terrible like there’s a fog in my head. I ran blood tests and they came back fine, and doctors say nothing is wrong with me. All i’m left with now is depression. Could this be it? Is this what depression is like?",1.240309278350516,3.395407515463919,3.034237113402064,90.58537628865984,82.09278350515464,6.35422680412371,23.1020618556701,7.554174236665415,1.0187987628865982,367,13,79,6,10,122,67,97,0.221,0.65,0.129,-0.8729,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,2,4,10,0,0,2,0,13,6,2,2,1,17,21,8,0,2,4,0,2,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,6,1,0,2,1,0,3,1,7,0,0,3,4,13,3,6,16,1,9,0,5,1,0,2,2,0,3,6,51,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16298647904600835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522958909870337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265278412614245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15813476931142328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5117662843755889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20272277124130836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20266479446266547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20029014317013868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125620449265216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20326666894797565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234202724133244,0.0,0.2151927363121763,0.0,0.0,0.19352419334576565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215784440251968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322065675620474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190043882384566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19811356728053253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750523724374674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19588637415643506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17106022189155956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14419001663514908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21654748460771767,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Datchaoss,2020/01/14,"New here going through a tough time I don’t know if this is how to use reddit but I’m having a real bad day.

I’ve been suffering from suicidal thoughts for a little over a year now. The meds don’t make me feel better so I quit using them. 

I feel as though I’m a constant punching bag to my peers and I get no respect or anything from them. My friend group seems to make fun of me and only me and I feel like I’m descending into my personal hell. My only thought that consoles me is that I should kill them. I’m afraid of myself and what I may do and I’m posting this so I can get help that I need. I feel like I’m going insane and I can only hope I don’t snap in public.",-1.1740641338445457,0.8026655496688733,1.575698849773442,97.9207389334263,92.17880794701986,4.238550017427676,16.556639944231442,5.750287758089431,-0.6456039735099335,522,13,126,4,19,180,87,151,0.204,0.618,0.17800000000000002,-0.7687,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,3,2,6,13,2,1,6,0,12,0,0,5,0,28,36,14,2,4,3,0,4,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,8,0,0,2,4,6,0,0,3,4,24,7,13,31,0,13,1,1,0,0,8,4,1,5,8,77,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877682986929573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13066149089869286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840149897118134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16910864310081974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092223688486532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31650146493730896,0.2235910536711427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090274713725713,0.0,0.16351772745012302,0.0,0.1778722185310953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489104721597807,0.0,0.0,0.15542854455604202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313151170902352,0.0,0.08600207259125896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290490516728966,0.15684274396596615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089147855477682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17382361854040132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603435527413042,0.0,0.15113771873050452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35705002272049313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366398580296705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14987287461440316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664449478104147,0.0,0.17811834981069627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246139476431474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17117319010056842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374930960035166,0.2484690252034917,0.09124979353452194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703119083358447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10077356353061677
mentalhealth,aaliyahbear,2020/01/14,"If asked about drug use at a mental eval/interview type thing, should you be honest? I’ve got an appointment in two days and they’re gonna be asking me questions, one of which I know; ‘do you use drugs or alcohol?’  ( I’m underage) and I do.. but I’ve seen many people talk about how answering truthfully screws themselves over, and gets them in trouble. so I’m wondering if anyone know if it’s better to be honest or keep it to myself? Because I don’t wanna be honest and get punished but I also think telling them could help, so if anyone has experience please let me know. Also idk if this is even relevant to post/ask I don’t really use reddit do not sure of the way this works. Ty",2.9662077922077934,4.385910685714286,4.545064935064937,85.14538961038964,74.28571428571429,7.948051948051948,23.441558441558442,8.575989854853784,1.4321428571428574,536,15,111,10,11,180,94,140,0.092,0.718,0.19,0.9524,0,0,3,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,2,2,8,9,2,0,3,0,14,3,0,4,2,31,32,18,0,8,10,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,7,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,2,1,12,6,12,22,0,6,0,0,1,1,10,4,1,9,1,69,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524207955622338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281113969987661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19945087494724684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4000002371442102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694176139764592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613860479842584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387299686918068,0.0,0.0,0.09198014651881684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307951975192158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420125948219174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13951282869781556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14902944082030933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406877890236028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559730530392788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267700277226367,0.0,0.0,0.2351458949594153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458418555918795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14459751002909385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373061126576847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966451519379661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887694899462172,0.0,0.0,0.15655741306929274,0.0,0.0,0.1365935733465334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597705926168287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913680555610204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442065100258166,0.0,0.0,0.11463510256002694,0.1246589380203851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475249756848934,0.09138716924899744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393221143283863,0.0,0.0,0.3695418824724928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320763475531698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15466874529510927,0.10383136728473633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zeteter,2020/01/14,"The cost for inpatient mental health treatment is fucking shameful. The average daily cost to be treated at a mental health facility, if you are uninsured,  is $1,000 per day. This is unacceptable and morally evil. I’m ashamed of the way the United States handles our health care. The elite truly DO NOT GIVE A FLYING FUCK about the lower classes.",5.728571428571428,7.890339317460318,5.806539682539682,75.87457142857146,68.52380952380952,7.5796825396825405,33.234920634920634,8.238735603445708,2.8528311111111115,279,13,44,4,5,88,51,63,0.20600000000000002,0.637,0.157,-0.5994,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,1,0,1,1,7,3,2,8,0,6,5,0,0,0,4,11,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,5,10,0,4,1,0,0,2,3,1,2,1,1,25,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22433490839936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419009317825533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4068277608752965,0.0,0.21107250466894648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7016437367945578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4434763030110217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17464930710228968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,obviousthrowawayisi,2020/01/14,"Inpatient Care?? Throwaway account for obvious reasons.
I live in the US in case that’s important.
I’m being vague because a lot of people I know use Reddit, so I’m sorry if I can’t clarify much.

I’ve been trying to seek help. I have therapy, but I’ve had a ton of thoughts lately about doing bad things to myself. Lately, it’s all I can think of. I think it would be safer for me to be in inpatient care where I can’t harm myself.

I’ve only heard bad things, and even with googling I have no idea what to expect if I got placed there. Can anyone tell me what to expect? Is there something I should do to prepare beforehand?

I know the general rules for inpatient care, but I have no idea what it’s really like or how getting admitted works. It’s really scary to me, but it’s the only way I think I’d be safe right now.",1.0825127507650478,3.0438253641618545,3.3163957837470264,89.4110846650799,81.48554913294797,6.845154709282558,21.159129547772864,7.928766900206844,0.9658122407344444,640,19,139,12,17,219,98,173,0.153,0.7,0.147,-0.5022,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,1,8,8,0,0,5,0,18,0,0,3,2,29,34,9,0,6,6,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,11,2,0,1,10,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,5,1,19,5,18,23,4,10,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,4,4,91,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876580014853333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358769321163467,0.08610513875191096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4320436233213195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932947801830308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07379768061784339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297111855977104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467739214363767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31890977986934665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525542299377246,0.0,0.31867396948961363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900797566355113,0.0,0.12472698935575555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200863261465814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383554483855294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21485510227513752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792547649923793,0.0,0.14757695736706122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809776791981808,0.14522928378781172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062735834368105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874171888424164,0.0,0.15811863665575787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345937075990455,0.0,0.16153252885628122,0.0,0.187681427637738,0.2715233080799658,0.0,0.1121373079930262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589997905876163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990724588990214,0.12199528570780305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211826102531852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283221944356563,0.0,0.0,0.10034047148756887,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,veggie_lauren,2020/01/14,"Finally was able to see a therapist! After jumping through a million hoops just to see a psychologist I finally got to see one. We talked about a traumatic incident and how I can begin to live with it without intrusive thoughts. I feel like a weight has been lifted, and I walked out of there ready to be kind to myself armed with some new tools 😊",6.187058823529411,6.324045352941178,6.657647058823527,77.60941176470591,66.05882352941177,10.917647058823533,34.64705882352941,10.686352973137794,3.6513705882352943,276,12,54,7,4,90,51,68,0.055999999999999994,0.813,0.131,0.6114,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,5,0,5,2,1,1,0,12,12,3,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,4,5,6,2,14,7,1,8,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,1,6,39,7,0,0.21590658573076693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916885701251718,0.15424370798623555,0.0,0.4730302224750389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17268022005085898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22483348443803627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548105192515744,0.0,0.19064947079228656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085239258978676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630389019752513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5161487859226003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735375352142798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506841870320618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17140571207057326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629160558472254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20812624399998028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vmach13,2020/01/14,"Mental Illness with conservative parents Background: 
Since I was 6 I remember crying over how fucked up the world is. I have been very low for as long as I can remember (as I’ve never been diagnosed with anything I’m going to avoid using the term depressed, even though I fit every single symptom.) I never quite had my own personality, I remember always just giving everything I have to make other people happy and not myself, going to humiliating extents just to please others and try to fit in. I always wanted to fit in. I was sexually abused by my sister at 9. By 13-14 I got insanely self-conscious, and absolutely hated my family, I realise now it’s because I blamed them for never realising what my sister used to do. I self-harmed often and was constantly suicidal. I had plenty of friends though because I always made sure it’s well hidden out of a fear of not fitting in, I was even one of the most popular kids throughout all of my high school years. I could never tell anyone anything though. I also always maintained an A+ in all my subjects. My parents were quite conservative and had no clue what mental illness was, not that it mattered because I showed them no symptoms, but that’s almost how the entire country was ( Arab country). The psychiatric ward is even known as the loony bin throughout almost  the entire population. It’s very looked down upon and till now I could never tell them. Anyways, when I was 15 I had a chance to be an exchange student in America and I just had to pass an exam. This meant the entire fucking world to me. If only I can pass this exam I can go to a more open minded country where I can get help, where I can be myself, where I can finally live away from my toxic family. It meant the only way to happiness. I promised if I failed I would end it all. I failed. I remember reading the results and feeling this huge kind of electric charge go through my brain. And since then I have felt nothing. I’m 19 now in my second year of medical school. I don’t feel like I’m in my body or I can control my actions 90% of the time. I feel like I’m just watching someone’s life. The person in my head is completely different than the person on the outside. My personality is just a mixture of different aspects I liked of a lot of different people’s personalities. I have nothing original. My personality changes depending who I’m talking to so I bond with them, so I am good friends with individuals, but bring two different people together and I can’t function. I can not think for my self. Whenever I try to talk to anyone about my slightest feelings I break down and start crying. That is the only time I cry. There is absolutely no way I can tell my parents anything because of how close minded they are. I want to see a psychiatrist for the first time and finally get a diagnosis but there’s no way I can afford one. These past two years of medical school have been an insane rollercoaster of substance abuse and regret. I currently have this amazing gf who I greatly helped with her diagnosed mental illnesses over the course of 3 months, as I am this great symbol of positivity for everyone I meet, and she just realised that I myself, am not okay. When she did she said ‘you helped me, now it’s your turn.’ I then tried pushing her away and told her that it’s more trouble than she can imagine, but what’s crazy is that she wouldn’t budge and she stayed. I told her I’m not okay and I need help but I can’t afford it so that’s it chapter closed, and she offered to pay for my full treatment. I rejected it because I can’t let anyone do that much for me, I don’t feel like I deserve it. Since then I’ve quit the drugs hoping being sober will make me feel better, but it changed nothing. I’m at a loss.

Notes: I haven’t self-harmed in 2-3 years now, I realise that my parents love me and I love them, but that still doesn’t change their views. I have to interact with my sister often and she pretends nothing ever happened (she is 5 years older). The last time I felt happy was when I tried MDMA, before that I don’t remember feeling happy.

TL;DR: I believe I have a mental illness, but my parents and the country they live in look down heavily on mental illnesses, and they would never offer to treat me, and I cannot afford it by myself. I met this amazing girl and she’s offering to pay, but I cannot accept that much from her.",3.8935110319787753,5.353717572580648,5.240703812316717,80.91363147605084,72.00691244239631,7.795168272587628,28.35888842340455,8.344100000000001,2.0397858678955454,3455,132,659,55,66,1155,340,868,0.11900000000000001,0.746,0.135,0.9744,14,2,1,0,2,0,91.0,0,2,9,9,40,41,3,2,34,2,71,20,3,12,11,123,122,58,1,12,24,8,9,4,3,4,13,1,0,9,40,34,0,4,20,3,3,9,27,13,1,6,28,15,133,28,88,84,14,97,0,7,5,4,69,40,2,11,47,477,173,11,0.0,0.1052013934506718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891015858883644,0.0,0.0,0.035502585310425765,0.1477604520554264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312583846600167,0.0,0.1095996594720078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342093945821137,0.0,0.0,0.1353135942206036,0.0,0.037776789869432906,0.05001784941114735,0.0,0.039263681137496315,0.0,0.04931272553599463,0.0,0.04955939042348243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408917522241156,0.0,0.04654720776550269,0.04797511507940988,0.04979265507232306,0.07089143004851793,0.0,0.14629713833597915,0.0,0.0,0.038237262123501495,0.09011977753212894,0.0,0.1855328851674108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148398929084909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039320704096050166,0.0,0.0,0.0879672378088366,0.040157728502232856,0.037404617796547,0.042421229236399766,0.039899273317875655,0.0,0.08370312092545658,0.04995660476341155,0.15713176670517148,0.09514717580878854,0.08525213166744908,0.09726488539534517,0.0,0.03776227906925058,0.0,0.0,0.0685987788793107,0.08208473894372936,0.04638900560077407,0.042587633171032285,0.10092257849141092,0.037236335629300336,0.03550665690113716,0.09789106745883466,0.0,0.0,0.039258263254396415,0.1890367853200796,0.0,0.04383077242306879,0.0455619750977805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902786205874227,0.04690564906114971,0.0,0.04409415258128314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046230456444156035,0.0,0.036187768624756235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04539679286615832,0.031357430624065416,0.08675642222773433,0.0,0.07840301970673122,0.03928808927462275,0.07456106933912593,0.0,0.0,0.03774295621184618,0.08013626067863122,0.04200752759063056,0.05926788066337356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944638188543072,0.22369808590537849,0.0,0.08965238641833184,0.0,0.035435585448149474,0.0,0.06527071895414567,0.0329182556572388,0.205440501390232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17039241468373276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06016626607280408,0.10129296536847758,0.0,0.0,0.24647641208838106,0.0,0.042379955222608456,0.09233350099386298,0.23258348455316386,0.0,0.04873226841447291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416583217600007,0.044406913665114116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514538358814377,0.0,0.04222971601553359,0.0,0.0,0.13479002610786206,0.035376987293419315,0.0,0.1852542505317233,0.0,0.0,0.11017175957370744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03761565451224392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0314229385598576,0.04731905623050281,0.03545382430733894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048560814769760666,0.0,0.041841667645636633,0.0922865987389664,0.0,0.07136587758004527,0.11640929756262212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028446459188169362,0.130853290870399,0.0,0.10354809229191574,0.0,0.0,0.08484245847279953,0.0,0.12056489115717185,0.048288902638530334,0.08673473249737154,0.0,0.0,0.07668587880523405,0.0,0.07326088344837846,0.052370524238667726,0.10571581508609766,0.0,0.0,0.03991634651061937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307372609615179,0.0,0.0,0.14294429955485005
mentalhealth,renvlovee,2020/01/14,"I’m not longer agoraphobic clinical diagnosis changed huzzah And absolutely no one gave a shit about it except me
Told my husband he said “uh huh yeah ok”
Told my close friends on Fb crickets 


So all my hard work and exposure therapy got me a diagnosis change and real eye opener that still no one wants to celebrate my achievements 

👍",3.255714285714287,6.1110818730158725,4.7771428571428585,76.84285714285717,79.47619047619048,8.679365079365079,29.63492063492064,9.23628265651192,3.271863492063492,270,13,48,8,7,90,52,63,0.141,0.7040000000000001,0.155,0.2383,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,1,0,2,3,0,3,2,0,1,10,7,4,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,2,5,3,6,2,4,2,1,4,0,0,1,0,7,3,1,0,1,25,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4975537905325851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18169045695635253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18808558469269546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106646186465736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187122731545366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267673027583706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22369892074896347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413968960840841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780572029084427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26893546354282394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4494268061635269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870836530061112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17120533430017765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pancakes4meplz,2020/01/14,"How do I get help? This feels like a ridiculous question. I tried finding an answer but it seems most times people ask the question doesn't get answered so here's to hoping this one does. I don't know how to get the help I need. I've been in and out of talk therapy for years and I just don't feel like it's doing anything for me. I think I've finally realized that I do want help and my brain is just tricking me into thinking I don't and lately I've felt absolutely manic. It's almost like it takes everything in me not to drive my car full speed into a wall or smash all the dishes on the ground in my house and it's only getting worse every day. I do have insurance but they recently slashed mental health benefits so talk therapy isn't something I'm looking into again as they've been reduced to ""coaching sessions"". Whatever the hell that is. 

I just moved to a new state (Colorado) and haven't gotten a doctor out here. My old one made me feel so small for expressing and mental health concerns so I feel like I didn't do it correctly. If anyone can just point me in the right direction I'm sure I could figure the rest out but I truly don't know where to start.",2.079887766554436,3.975251835390949,3.576986531986531,89.0905303030303,77.97119341563786,6.558099513655069,23.39113355780023,7.520522993642371,0.9976024691358027,928,30,194,13,22,306,129,243,0.061,0.785,0.154,0.9623,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,14,10,3,0,12,0,20,5,1,3,3,52,45,19,0,5,10,0,5,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,10,13,1,0,17,1,0,3,9,3,0,2,6,6,24,7,22,38,4,33,1,0,1,0,10,18,1,8,15,121,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139763542871516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958703277371629,0.0,0.09366585937984667,0.0,0.10640826382774073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706306525183367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087765532506004,0.0,0.0,0.07340581421325422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650170428444655,0.09960645415104942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589999697717397,0.0,0.10229593071604497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302074195988716,0.2439435131266546,0.10928702992870497,0.12468650617063465,0.1040313032983795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23786931983029225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419750602998613,0.0,0.0,0.2288775881975451,0.0,0.0,0.11305099071608392,0.0,0.13133537837765513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510725797310362,0.0,0.12839624452876353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22243084195230586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955818658959419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770118788199234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294117360461926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12097483952650605,0.0,0.08439761729939307,0.0,0.10993005747983224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943710793049303,0.0,0.15425755092309507,0.08656680774445924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890988678070633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075986398463304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550135193788408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238555537550368,0.0,0.0,0.09720341968036927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361933107527667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762578475236399,0.0,0.0,0.08056384185758088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727594711867086,0.0,0.08558002586196271,0.18297172508019888,0.0,0.0,0.2603308969050465,0.0,0.0,0.1458651637610681,0.0,0.0,0.0663705601257578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727770913484278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671352016413985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599440603914635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329767661189608
mentalhealth,the_luanblakaj,2020/01/14,"Feeling of emptiness Hi. I really don't know how to start this or why I am even doing this. But here it goes. I have felt so empty and so sad for the past month and I can't figure out why. It all started when my ex girlfriend nroke up with me for cheating when I felt something like an emptiness come up in me. So I just thought I'd have to get over her. I did but somehow the feeling of constant sadness doesn't leave me. 
My main problem is that I feel like I don't have anyone to talk to. I have a lot of friends and I am very outgoing but that's exactly the problem, I feel like I can't talk to them about feeling bad because they don't know that side of me. I've tired to cover it but people keep asking me what's wrong. Especially my parents, and it fucks me up that I can't tell them because I don't know what's wrong. So I feel like I'm letting everyone down around me which just pushes me further into that feeling of emptiness and sadness. 

What can I do?",1.4441720085470102,2.981486697115386,3.0993589743589745,93.42341880341878,78.66346153846155,5.583760683760684,25.017094017094017,6.139981653823899,0.5641561965811963,755,28,172,5,18,250,105,208,0.22,0.6629999999999999,0.11800000000000001,-0.9802,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,3,0,15,15,2,0,5,0,20,2,0,1,2,39,41,17,0,2,7,2,9,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,15,10,0,1,14,0,0,2,8,10,0,0,4,9,32,5,24,36,3,20,0,3,0,1,13,11,1,3,11,121,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720029221566714,0.0,0.0,0.11101854447618416,0.11658723006199495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412783259259584,0.1520443969298152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074268202292137,0.0,0.1347674541109906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236993050146951,0.0,0.0,0.11916596875245344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44140067457402654,0.2672790389012442,0.2394827552438337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963508140562569,0.11529259774052596,0.06515594775759008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108481821854724,0.0,0.0,0.2056124422537523,0.0,0.0,0.13205012644420186,0.0,0.1275246591748538,0.0,0.24370847536388496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602417755275292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995425154869334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847595154521547,0.0,0.11905002543995928,0.08645837074422566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23866169454603864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989256648992472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600802756095134,0.0,0.0,0.17654108482652026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004747172766475,0.10900223752387572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900599205964476,0.0,0.1433360633456071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289900015786912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22506316961427175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727021175246043,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gozii55,2020/01/14,"Use Family and Friends as an Alternative/Addition to Therapy If you think about what therapy provides to us as an outlet, it's main purpose is to talk stuff out. Put aside the psychologist with a doctorate and wealth of knowledge about mental health, and you can boil down therapy to a regular conversation where you are getting an external opinion that may influence your outlook. 

Now think about what you would want in a therapist. You'd probably want someone you trust, feel comfortable talking to, someone whose opinion you value, and someone who understands you.

If you have family members and or friends in your life, these people probably share the exact same traits that I just listed. This means that you can get really valuable therapeutic support through family and friends. 

The only problem is going about it in a way that 

A) doesn't make either you or the other person uncomfortable 
B) won't overwhelm or burden the other person

If you have someone in your life who truly cares for you and wants to help you (You probably do even if you don't feel like it), reach out to them and start talking to them about some problems you may be having. It's important not to throw too much at them or use them as a crutch, but my point is that family and friends (even those you don't feel comfortable talking to about personal problems) are there for you. 

Imagine if your brother, sister, parent, best friend, etc. Sat you down and asked you to talk about a problem they were having. How would you react?Would you say no?

My guess is that 99% of you would be happy to talk to them and help out in any way you could. So consider that before you hold in all of your emotions and refuse to open up.

Therapy is not parasitic, it's symbiotic. I really recommend people use family and friends as a resource and make that difficult decision to sit them down for a real conversation. It could really make a difference in your mental health and I bet it might help them too. 

Thanks for reading",8.047540540540536,7.851459889189194,7.857972972972973,71.67533783783786,62.270270270270274,11.724324324324325,36.06756756756757,11.20814326018867,4.122848648648649,1589,65,279,40,20,509,175,370,0.048,0.765,0.187,0.9943,1,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,1,32,8,1,17,25,0,1,18,0,30,6,0,8,2,78,56,31,0,17,14,3,3,1,6,7,5,1,0,3,26,20,1,2,10,1,2,3,7,7,0,0,2,4,46,18,50,42,8,26,0,1,0,0,71,18,0,17,3,215,72,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04638288873661161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376404878911228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058038870317663124,0.0,0.07157871410816215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954126713647449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891498535053752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126147496327015,0.0,0.06981243832747823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767233469218664,0.0,0.0,0.07606849000671964,0.09009975216768806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214959898238421,0.0,0.10346205694146897,0.04872687362570643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.316177921291394,0.0,0.07127036176271828,0.0,0.03876343427692038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751373597450564,0.0,0.0,0.07260729078873905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500104593085472,0.0,0.0,0.13715252157659866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635280582471427,0.033322343933292815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13658548747974558,0.0,0.0,0.0742970818947722,0.0,0.0,0.1374726041365105,0.07235652045824474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05013976579287843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05187426196024797,0.0,0.0,0.07573545855538936,0.0,0.0,0.09457186292925,0.17866635498499445,0.0,0.0,0.06447736927566411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061504674231489,0.2610583668045577,0.0,0.06856656319483502,0.0,0.0,0.06822514862499382,0.07763414661849974,0.13108485821754462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054240698240283824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311652315292843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048277046895166716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808034280216596,0.0,0.07740014457670005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3289317272555734,0.0,0.06279555714651427,0.3120011813826657,0.07919322519505483,0.0,0.08740818695951534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100557069186901,0.08204425111534308,0.1767260449030773,0.0,0.0,0.12069022044732428,0.10827859299346697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19380830515238867,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,offand-on,2020/01/14,"Unsure if my fear is normal This is my first time posting anything so I apologize if I’m doing anything wrong but I’m unsure if the way I feel sometimes is normal fear or worry or being upset or if this is something I need to address more seriously. Im not looking for validation or comfort, I am honestly just confused. I feel relatively normal most days and don’t get worried or afraid irrationally out of nowhere (I know anxiety disorder will cause people to feel excessive worry over “irrational” things? I’m so sorry if this is an incorrect way of saying it I don’t know how to explain it). 

There are situations that I do feel stressed 
in, especially uncertainty in the future or uncertainty about a problem, I feel so stressed and worried that I get extremely nausea, headaches, bad insomnia, my appetite completely disappears, I can’t focus on anything else and this reaction stays in full force for a few days. I’m not sure if this is normal and I’m just bad at managing it or if this needs more serious help?",5.8426724821570195,6.94828762886598,7.139278350515465,70.45714908802537,67.04123711340206,10.505313243457573,36.05709754163362,10.560738912317856,4.195757018239491,816,41,140,22,13,278,107,194,0.344,0.595,0.06,-0.9966,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,8,16,0,7,5,0,15,1,0,2,1,44,33,23,0,14,19,0,5,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,12,5,0,0,8,0,0,1,5,13,0,1,0,7,14,3,15,31,5,18,0,0,1,0,4,8,0,16,5,95,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299364031242322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678311326380129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18116724432020534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144788927782244,0.0,0.0,0.11374844992247048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399326107585762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433757170814738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906284771643898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24416013883604004,0.27427600239948546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228052370630994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336184776358445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271776040238573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718652819768767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924522206213795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911032741707554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16088615128220765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4251839855309042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521247867239192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390228791010496,0.0,0.0,0.10380913644593348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627465364883337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194596443027883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351998381589608,0.10729820405094614,0.1214443371870795,0.0,0.11563463323363934,0.0,0.0,0.2485471234597044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224941656736028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720751426392972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326069573266446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17222673031809174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44070259821411706,0.0,0.0,0.11861547945954827,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JrSouther,2020/01/14,What do I do There’s no place in my area that is affordable. I’m so lost and I need help but I can’t afford it.,-4.331785714285715,-3.234699178571427,-0.34171428571428564,107.4867142857143,112.21428571428572,3.6685714285714286,9.17142857142857,5.6839178017228535,-1.8208228571428573,85,1,26,1,5,31,24,28,0.147,0.777,0.076,-0.18899999999999997,2,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,7,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,1,6,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,17,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3699706248628653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6025351961943916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092751866413848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5766861327318586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Help_im_happy,2020/01/14,Want to get help but don't know how to. I've been feeling lonely this past few months and I lost the motivation to do anything like my hobbies. This affected my studies a lot and I failed many subjects because I just can't focus and can't find anything to motivate myself. I also don't have friends to talk to because of my trust issues. I think I want to quit school because it's not helping me to get better. But instead it just gives me reccuring suicidal thoughts. Family has expectations of me but lack empathy. Tried telling them once that I'm tired but they told me to get over it. I don't know where else I can get help. I live in a country that doesn't care much about mental health. Harming myself has become regular to me when I have breakdowns and I'm afraid that It'll get worse.,2.808944099378881,4.7075432795031125,3.8465527950310574,87.96746894409941,75.83229813664596,6.836024844720497,27.02795031055901,7.7094869923839395,1.5233900621118015,632,25,129,9,14,204,96,161,0.233,0.618,0.14800000000000002,-0.9636,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,6,8,10,0,1,3,0,14,2,0,4,0,26,32,11,1,4,7,0,1,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,8,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,4,1,22,5,15,27,4,6,0,3,0,0,10,3,0,1,4,82,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621503463550187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23917747792558997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26576330542976634,0.16049822832283153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12852669808165906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816684590239265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139901576926973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369979258185871,0.0,0.0734798548584916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282291388217465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227646372377133,0.0,0.3796272754126224,0.13940740429858606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544719309324617,0.0,0.0,0.29222154508176684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167982661744572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15973183094838148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099765077592499,0.0,0.12832318507336946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863760901137744,0.12354871976373635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473350727524532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464517616059621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599571564092925,0.0,0.10682938717863727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547646304280462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13872758620201442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15456927644187687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707499388826464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15896016363458032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116805408144775,0.12701901781560082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311733810099948,0.0,0.11537051123854865,0.0,0.1670278188530382,0.0,0.1388626935723752,0.0,0.0986650188932974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714309601697897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480969142524578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Valvmol,2020/01/15,"Trying not to think about ending it all All my life I have felt worthless. When I was growing up, my family would always tell me that nobody cares about me. My friends over the years proved to me that my parents were right. My first relationship of 4 years, he proved that to be right as well by cheating on me. My second and most recent relationship of 5 years has been filled with his lies and gaslighting and cheating. I’m still going through this with him. I can’t seem to catch a break. I feel so worthless and useless and alone. I have no one. Everyone always fails me in the end. Is it because I’m terrible? Because I deserve to be treated this way? What’s the point of being alive if I am constantly being treated like a worthless pile of shit. I bring nothing to this world. I work a soul sucking job, make little money. My family is poor and asks me for money when I’m already struggling for myself. I literally bring nothing of value to this world, to anyone. So what’s the point of being alive. 27 years of this bullshit is enough. I’m so tired. I just want to be happy, to be loved in the right way. To be surrounded by people who care about me. But I don’t think I’ll ever feel any of this. I thought things would get better as the years went by, as everybody always says. But at this rate ill get to 75, and still be treated like shit. Still be wronged by everyone. Still alone in my one bedroom apartment. That’s not worth it to me. I can’t keep living with this constant pain, a constant reminder that I’m worthless.",2.2462863860277658,4.340981490259741,3.225445588893866,90.85435064935066,78.25324675324677,5.676847290640395,23.607702642185398,6.647476241863616,0.6538961934617111,1201,40,247,11,29,383,152,308,0.20600000000000002,0.6920000000000001,0.102,-0.988,2,2,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,0,4,15,27,5,1,10,0,25,7,2,1,5,34,51,18,0,4,6,1,3,2,1,2,4,1,1,0,20,10,0,1,9,0,4,7,6,15,1,4,6,4,33,12,44,33,4,46,1,6,0,1,12,17,3,3,21,165,53,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18925939412236512,0.10082686449308248,0.0,0.22807649615632866,0.0,0.0,0.062133375905333715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388663285289367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541675002515975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139417445953824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080757465180048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18631153900137384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962090599426158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618498642792076,0.0944075724042971,0.0,0.0,0.08264759059210924,0.0,0.1746120867443506,0.0,0.0,0.1722672453733109,0.0,0.09239681631140176,0.0,0.08772761231706815,0.0,0.0,0.07771757758078537,0.0,0.0,0.07059069329108922,0.0,0.09547202209543956,0.0,0.05192654228559244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972629393064008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066864571841146,0.08121208011756623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453592334272909,0.08927558321824994,0.09157474330723904,0.08067962152723232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246319091207809,0.0,0.06098885219636025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17534012821466022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382664835150067,0.0,0.0972219982465027,0.0,0.10145335583789243,0.0,0.0,0.06334306971282494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17274459317707927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090214881294262,0.19619008568578303,0.0,0.23408332873102236,0.0,0.07265950407420714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317799935688601,0.0,0.0,0.18757588635473704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918664242789127,0.0,0.0,0.09551767596738456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985966275902673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06070084200587099,0.11708985545077548,0.0,0.07253598932108397,0.0,0.10501407989427178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062032877205605075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053891216059828696,0.14504733758967667,0.0,0.0,0.08215080850897748,0.08469905514344203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651699514568084,0.0,0.0,0.12981041722077838,0.09989656925353098,0.0,0.2941899949950652
mentalhealth,xxkittensrevengexx,2020/01/15,Might kill myself tonight. Cant do this anymore My ex aka also my fp left me almost 6 months ago. Ever since then ive felt worthless ugly and nothing without him. Im highly considering suicide becausr life is pointless without him.. this obsession i have is so unhealthy and idk what to do. He even likes another girl and im still lonely and single,1.6726307189542489,4.407915249999999,3.3213725490196104,84.70728758169936,87.6764705882353,4.786928104575163,26.67320261437909,6.42735559955562,1.4132888888888884,279,13,48,3,9,92,55,68,0.326,0.64,0.034,-0.9755,0,2,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,1,0,0,8,1,0,0,1,10,9,7,2,0,2,1,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,1,8,1,3,7,1,8,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,2,7,32,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789726972034486,0.0,0.2021742833558184,0.0,0.0,0.16145983442920922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21171037993020225,0.0,0.0,0.20023113985689645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335344010978922,0.18263064896064315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19385623530522544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133190657803676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43617458202578097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233730964533327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21936558932979852,0.0,0.14260836252959347,0.09863843327240053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21418462726785695,0.0,0.0,0.16115513023442113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937290680543028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670142601729692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16123807752288366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208464832607715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3892499412234461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,medicaladvice-124,2020/01/15,"Why Am I so obsessive over things? I hope its ok to post this type of post here and If not I will remove it. For some reason whenever I break something it drives me fucking nuts. Its never that I’ve broken it so badly that that it can’t be fixed its when it’s only slightly broken. For example over the summer I became absolutely convinced that one side of my earphones was quiter than the other, and it drove me fucking crazy. Every time I put them on I would obsess about how one ear was quiter than the other. It was one of the most horrible feelings ever. My family all said that they heard no real difference which made it even worse. Another example is my pc. While I do love it I sometimes feel that it is too much effort for what I get out of it. I have spent so many hours banging my head against the wall in infuriation. I cannot tell you how long I’ve spent trying to work it out. I spent so long (and still do) trying to figure out what was wrong with it as I felt personally it was underperforming. I upgraded every part and was still unsatisfied and fucking miserable. Other examples was my mouse and my my mouse pad in which I went through around 5 mouse pads and mice as I was convinced they were all broken. More recently I feel things have definitely gotten worse. I don’t drink milk within 3 days of the drink by date, I started turning my downstairs light off four in fear of bad luck, whenever I’m given any food of any type I’m always convinced something is wrong with it e.g different brand, reheated ect and I also have been frustrated by my airsoft gun which I can’t for the life of me figure out if its broken. There have also been countless of other examples. I’m really not sure if I’m just a spoiled whiny brat who just has to be difficult or if theres a deeper meaning here. What do y’all think? Also recently I have grown an addiction to Reddit. Every 5 minutes whether it be in school or in bed I’m refreshing my inbox. I can’t stop.",3.635155331654072,4.994032032745594,4.937750629722924,83.23137825356844,72.50125944584383,8.114492023509655,25.82779177162049,8.648137234880735,1.7577392779177168,1555,50,313,28,30,517,204,397,0.139,0.778,0.083,-0.9697,1,0,4,1,0,0,30.0,0,2,3,2,23,21,4,4,10,1,34,12,2,4,5,50,63,28,0,6,11,0,4,0,0,2,2,3,1,1,40,15,4,1,9,2,3,6,9,13,0,4,22,8,42,8,44,36,7,43,0,1,0,4,11,17,3,10,17,222,82,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752335938651536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23662774990377886,0.08206966476037891,0.0,0.0,0.1341461856065921,0.10342417566007173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780332648828419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16470707888998512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360943349880133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20609874260541144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932434783926289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514545776799749,0.08921822503575726,0.2493049581549365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298140305056547,0.110988339531122,0.14961379801636734,0.0,0.09470211776870756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926611801100058,0.0,0.0,0.27355088239151154,0.05153111113648698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122481273116156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796375877034973,0.09713258051098364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06966664715125655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17457230380614366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901916524427785,0.09332791444038653,0.0,0.0999972933985952,0.0,0.1074390837802352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250581530741766,0.0,0.07607102280645424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005066396775734,0.07501402524366314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068087656649292,0.0,0.0,0.08612159451578112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889242439589391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991523292670667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226472655501367,0.06318613824924217,0.10141004839835896,0.1947742583473221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938215493553254,0.0,0.0,0.09982077614439916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518633527255219,0.09754949812084704,0.0,0.0698121858053368,0.0,0.15753516911468188,0.082460707676009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295942422819577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862086518465885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310533396833664,0.0631993564371915,0.0,0.0,0.0575130699910593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339292085466693,0.10728321404171616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914327847668084,0.08899997318181921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180521778182755,0.0,0.2010287205791336,0.07006529127235489,0.21567705802696602,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ezroad92,2020/01/15,"Help me stop crying at work I won’t go into everything stressful in my life right now, including my upcoming wedding, immigration issues with my fiancé, money issues, weight issues, work issues, etc., but basically I am a hotbed of stress (and consequently IBS) and I’m dieting and not sleeping enough and I’ve been bursting into tears multiple times per day. I have a pretty stressful job where it’s hard to take breaks. I didn’t really take a lunch break today, for example. How can I keep everything together long enough to get through the day? Does anyone have tips? I don’t have time or money for therapy right now. I used to use a whole bunch of coping mechanisms that were unhealthy and I’ve had to stop all of them cold turkey for various, unrelated reasons. I’m currently hiding in the bathroom at work trying to pull it together enough to leave the bathroom and go to the gym. 

Anything that would help - like pinching myself or certain breathing or anything would be hugely appreciated.",6.0739882943143835,7.609448489130436,6.732173913043479,72.0058026755853,66.82608695652173,9.791973244147158,32.0886287625418,10.035473477838034,3.4876643812709034,798,33,131,19,13,262,117,184,0.15,0.747,0.10300000000000001,-0.7407,2,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,3,4,5,0,3,8,0,14,6,2,4,2,25,24,11,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,4,9,3,3,1,1,2,3,4,3,0,0,4,3,13,2,21,16,8,26,0,0,0,0,4,10,0,3,12,83,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750744824720151,0.0,0.17671009140978633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793914695028672,0.13848747265564434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395881132450162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33282077908278146,0.1197441487548082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929915914652985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609555809488298,0.0,0.12203987327453862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618099806088798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14393355202497554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4482588621480173,0.10654657085186978,0.0954339681563912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368763396622485,0.0,0.0,0.07583747694083671,0.052454777378315484,0.0,0.0,0.09501765626572407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923226353125008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878294705432791,0.11039259848808394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338405573586905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744594125120148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17952958187658716,0.3689704220178207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145535089355267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278512387935375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521475620245973,0.0,0.10177268996243996,0.0,0.0,0.07289609648366255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854636508743952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074578729491929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198729854547093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344964242044575,0.0,0.0,0.15254286314895185,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sad_mogul97,2020/01/15,"Struggling with obsessive thinking My mind just won't let go, it keeps spinning the wheels and it doesn't stop. What do I do?",1.5766666666666684,4.168126399999999,1.8200000000000005,96.85666666666668,85.0,4.933333333333334,24.333333333333336,6.42735559955562,0.6207333333333342,100,4,21,1,3,30,22,25,0.184,0.743,0.07400000000000001,-0.4238,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,8,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24500670901849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38318562350475655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4408337157607641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43529280524434544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3604227933611353,0.0,0.4506841860016677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762344542956881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,masimpzc,2020/01/15,"Need immediate advice I need some advice. I believe I am having an episode of psychosis. That’s all I can think that it could be. I have been diagnosed as Bipolar 2 a while ago. I stopped taking my medication because I thought I could handle it on my own. I now know that I can’t. I called my doctor this morning and have not heard back. For three days I have felt out of touch with reality. I feel like I am in a haze or a dream. I have a wave of depression hanging within me, I want to cry but don’t feel centered enough to even do that. I luckily have had three days off, but I don’t know how I am going to make it to work tomorrow. I work as a sever in a high volume restaurant which requires a lot of talking, focus, and speed. How can I pull myself out of this? What should I do? I thought about going to the hospital but I don’t want to be dramatic or worse be hospitalized and have to tell people what’s going on and take time off work.  Feeling a little desperate.",2.0016176470588256,3.4948025931372584,3.9556862745098056,88.07558823529413,76.99019607843138,6.9568627450980385,24.745098039215684,7.724431198458867,1.1669392156862743,755,26,166,11,17,257,112,204,0.07200000000000001,0.861,0.067,-0.4254,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,4,6,2,0,0,10,0,26,4,0,3,1,37,46,14,0,7,6,0,5,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,12,7,0,2,9,1,0,5,5,1,0,2,6,6,29,1,26,34,5,27,0,1,0,0,4,12,0,4,11,126,41,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797309285639341,0.1268765488136968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100585166008602,0.0,0.08725102194777169,0.0,0.0,0.16125905537759536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14615223949112105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285561090406075,0.0,0.15722212910156005,0.1846146582185496,0.0,0.1232780865801706,0.1452744406922792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14650012774102672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789206368911434,0.0,0.09453634279384401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21711323829107254,0.10225245502959524,0.13742772213788254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440330781720253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122522756422702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157321554967468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992633060542125,0.1434543588464526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168442940939005,0.0,0.0,0.09554071758908547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14418891675272194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21225889855158192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922866420201183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16169672014380712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966350371877628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21523264054999253,0.11504287109739635,0.12510236234409935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171224255993624,0.0,0.2272592521813089,0.08346054331468787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16884414999407898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126021175621007,0.0,0.14586220353042612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kooky-Bike,2020/01/15,"I'm ready to give up This is a throwaway account (English is not my first language)

Ever since I was little this has been happening. My mom is an alcoholic who has been drunk everyday of my life. She had embarrassed me and my family like no other she has beaten me a few times while she was drunk but I was to afraid to do anything and I still am. My father works for all of us (there's 5 of us) he was okay at first but as time passed, he became worse.my dad is convinced my mom cheated so when I was little he didn't alove me to call him dad, he would yell at me for no reason and of course I didn't understand why.As time passed nothing pleased him they kept fighting everyday (there where times where my mom was screaming for help, no one called the cops, there was a time she screamed for me to call the cops but I was too scared) that left me scared deeply. My little brother is 6 currently he's to only reason I haven't killed myself,there where too many times to cound where he would come crying to me asking if everything was gonna be okay. He was injured once (couple of schraches) while trying to get in beetwen them. My father became more and more mean to me as time passed my grades dropped and my mental health became worse, when I finally had the guts to tell my mom that I wanted to see a therapist she called me crazy. My dad would bully me about my weight (if I where you I'd kill myself, throw yourself off a bridge, how aren't you embarrassed to leave the house, ect) as my grades dropped he would beat me more, he dropped me off at my grandmas house a couple of timees but he came back every time. Today like any other day he yelled at my mom, he told her that he's taking her to church to promise and pray that she won't drink again, and if she does that he will take her to rehab. Of course he had to yell at me for eating (I Mostly eat once a day, and I maybe get a snack while they aren't looking to avoid him) I'm sensetive, when I was eating he began again ""i get embarrassed when I see you, you're so disgusting"" so I started to cry when he saw thin he began to beat me my hand still hurts. I was bulimic and when my friend found out she told the teacher, who told my mom and my mom just laughed and yelled at me that I'm a crazy bitch who wants attention. It's been years and I don't know what to do, I'm lost I'm so lost. I'm afraid that police won't do anything, because if I tell the police and I get put back I know he'll kill me.",2.448929942418424,3.6074542936660254,3.3054889635316687,94.5628015834933,75.1612284069098,6.438406909788867,21.662236084452978,6.742157984588678,0.20544794625719787,1921,45,448,16,40,610,214,521,0.183,0.74,0.077,-0.9962,1,1,2,0,2,2,47.0,2,3,3,8,30,29,8,8,16,2,44,15,2,3,2,46,83,38,3,10,10,13,3,2,1,9,5,6,0,0,16,16,9,2,8,3,1,7,12,21,0,3,31,13,81,8,48,42,6,69,2,3,4,0,71,21,1,5,40,271,97,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612706224028718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04207807921236011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018380229993016,0.0,0.057846088696308876,0.0,0.0,0.0951582765626748,0.0,0.03771928394688711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25273092269974645,0.07077012658777374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053301046504296616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13693013689230413,0.13593665719733933,0.07981032839101124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414846154123897,0.0,0.0,0.0606153231588976,0.0,0.18994503826736092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05597075344729417,0.05213354237315482,0.0,0.05561052561717605,0.0,0.0583315705198227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778258037228738,0.0,0.10526408192014257,0.0,0.0678442875061843,0.04780555926147397,0.0,0.12931147711712362,0.05935748870823504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05471710316629623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577172813880343,0.0,0.0,0.04147445192447812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14279413408898262,0.06623997442772858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20537123280510927,0.0,0.06801131116075465,0.0,0.0,0.06551818173043741,0.06722889824393308,0.0,0.04370513681077877,0.06045937481508541,0.18604924872926973,0.0,0.0,0.05196059867423503,0.0,0.13509081720546384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273296573616377,0.0621631685017454,0.06740154790634573,0.0,0.0,0.06235686568848334,0.0,0.0,0.5072823077376948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059372082207177365,0.0,0.0,0.1317927099968261,0.04192905537495696,0.04705979647453692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679217147504288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06220288032975006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723850566872108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389815749239334,0.0,0.09861497188009198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051184804037672636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0437964399959891,0.0,0.09882915857451537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304671627116448,0.0,0.1081654156557178,0.0,0.0,0.07184327870914799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32472567945156583,0.0,0.05865159968176989,0.17737667824436276,0.0,0.04201001929792116,0.0,0.0,0.06441552282475549,0.14885940015310772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299261709747931,0.0,0.0,0.07534879523504336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04504676190414217,0.0,0.06305734591138841,0.17582089943825308,0.0,0.0,0.0398463779973801
mentalhealth,please_sub_to_me,2020/01/15,"I’m feeling a bit depressed I’m  a 12m and my Nan (dad side) recently got diagnosed with mild bowel cancer and I’ve started to feel really sad and a bit depressed. Which doesn’t help as my Grandfather (mom side) has skin cancer and dementia. I really need help on how to cope with this and how not to take it badly as I’m really trying to do well in my life and I don’t want to be full of sadness
 TL;DR: I’m feeling depressed as two of my grandparents have illnesses and I need help",2.384199029126215,3.593809009708739,4.782706310679612,83.70473907766991,75.40776699029126,8.645145631067964,25.496359223300967,9.188382445141503,2.0339135922330094,380,13,81,9,8,134,60,103,0.263,0.615,0.122,-0.9674,2,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,3,0,6,7,2,2,0,18,19,12,0,3,1,2,4,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,9,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,6,1,1,1,4,7,1,14,17,3,7,0,5,0,0,5,5,0,0,2,46,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14639004834101832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3828215888203751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4530245811202812,0.1779523959956535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26595057445865616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402243734367927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35255235571418114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12383807560622367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053399190361372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600043021240128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369553474614353,0.0,0.17311346474728953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409678228416222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318234780317347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903497679366205,0.0,0.17126821533094297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341193157624977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15763930394579745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Irationalexe,2020/01/15,"Contemplating suicide. I can not remember a moment where I was truly happy, I honestly do not know if I am capable of feeling it for more than short moments here or there. My parents neglected me, I grew up homeschool and isolated, then moved out at 18 because my parents divorced and sold our house, rendering me homeless. My fiance who emotionally cheated on me several times has emotionally cheated again and left me. My ex fiance and I have a child together and honestly he is the only thing keeping me going. My fiance just told me she doesnt want me in her life and if it wasn't for our son she would never talk to me again. I do not feel loved, I do not feel like I ever get back the work I put into people, infact most of the time I get betrayed. 

I have been in therapy for almost 2 years and on anti depressants for about a year now also. I am meditating, exercising, and many other mental experiences to make me feel better, it does for a short time then it's right back to normal. All I have ever known is living with my depression, feeling alone, being unlovable. I dont want to suffer through this life anymore but I can not leave my son behind. I am alive because I have to be, but I so not want to live anymore. I dont know what to do because I feel like I have tried everything. I have tried since I was 15 to overcome my depression it has been almost 6 years of fighting, and I am exhausted, I dont know how much longer I can do this.",4.172372013651874,4.996619163822532,5.749438566552904,79.93521587030719,70.67235494880546,8.726894197952218,29.325767918088737,8.982922981607832,2.3536950170648456,1137,43,225,21,20,388,153,293,0.153,0.774,0.073,-0.9636,2,1,0,0,3,3,28.0,2,0,0,2,15,17,3,0,7,0,34,5,0,2,4,51,54,19,1,7,12,5,6,2,0,1,4,0,0,1,11,12,0,2,11,1,1,4,12,10,0,0,7,6,49,7,29,44,4,35,0,5,0,1,18,13,0,6,20,171,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928310174660128,0.09972221117814067,0.0,0.07699907138556046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19097767424272988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14807442734869586,0.0,0.17608330790100546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515624877262512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487903613293708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425964324029013,0.0,0.33853587210677955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166153073591585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17419057100145038,0.0,0.0,0.08653474014842816,0.09418519545660996,0.0,0.0,0.2921075026511874,0.13757203159857284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006098660851674,0.0,0.0547209784704957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249716182699542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109995051272634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855825227725696,0.0,0.0,0.1587471366202668,0.0,0.0,0.10195190151717903,0.1046139229118707,0.0,0.1360178712608362,0.09407996473861624,0.0,0.17004281965542595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690096231884542,0.0,0.06427097821422363,0.09761786691407373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703262303200932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233570611897297,0.07078054603901247,0.0,0.07426091975047634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433884655584192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322907334837672,0.0,0.0,0.2138261727511638,0.0,0.0,0.06675188836851041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679300862706056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907212356460153,0.08222685501467399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877463180014113,0.0,0.07964793836762768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10532015092150876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739022741909128,0.0,0.0,0.11011027691227608,0.0,0.06396746870368533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843365519388864,0.0,0.0,0.09200443375253443,0.0,0.1307423752331246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17037414454863153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009661916770432,0.0,0.0,0.06839809405097995,0.0,0.0,0.18601312939906872
mentalhealth,Ashj0233,2020/01/15,"Where Are You So many people say “don’t kill yourself so many people love and care about you” but where are you I’ve tried to make friends but it’s always superficial and one sided.

None of them truly care about me they all have their own friends. 

But if we’re to kill myself they’ll say “we loved him so much”  “he was loved by so many” “if only he knew how many people cared about him” or whatever BS they can think of. But when I was alive none of you cared about me none of you asked how I’m doing I was all alone. 

You didn’t care about me when I was alive don’t care about me when I’m dead.",1.1814755244755268,2.5465131615384635,2.180629370629372,100.47800699300699,78.92307692307692,5.3426573426573425,15.664335664335663,5.565023196281405,-1.0706153846153843,461,5,118,2,11,145,66,130,0.122,0.5820000000000001,0.29600000000000004,0.9848,0,1,0,0,0,1,5.0,1,6,5,0,17,13,2,0,0,0,13,3,0,3,2,17,28,18,3,2,7,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,6,2,22,11,13,21,7,6,0,0,0,3,24,3,0,3,3,76,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11516800790932614,0.0,0.0,0.09252597767584003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395549439544616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6802450857504883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718232177794395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460491109196314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010826955427157,0.0,0.0742257962380437,0.4509509019517594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174361949802285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535091445717433,0.08457139486721638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23127291052102805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768588635446157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125144546292943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549641512678963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nightshade009,2020/01/15,"When you’ve finally had enough... When you’ve finally had enough and you are willing to take the first step to free yourself from anguish. To elevate your state of mind from the mental illness. How do you transform yourself? When you want to be a better you, how do we change ourselves?",3.7694444444444457,6.176784462962964,3.699777777777779,87.77300000000002,74.74074074074073,6.542222222222222,29.31851851851852,7.554174236665415,1.86427851851852,227,10,42,3,5,69,35,54,0.109,0.7609999999999999,0.13,-0.1179,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,5,0,2,5,3,0,1,3,0,7,1,0,2,0,6,9,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,6,3,7,5,2,8,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,6,32,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311169963115537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764427382231406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5400284480054128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5725282884312136,0.0,0.22227932428957087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633498856821233,0.0,0.2638594963702992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964807068360536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541337682388548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LineareGerade,2020/01/15,"How to deal with an unhealthy fear of hurting others? I (20F) grew up with a mother (63F) that cannot accept her own mistakes. Being raised in an abusive environment with two younger sisters my grandparents clearly liked better, I can see why she has remained that way.
Unfortunately over the years this has contributed to me internalizing very unhealthy ways of thinking and acting. I cannot bear the pain of hurting someone else even if it wasn't on purpose, the thought of having caused an inconvenience to another person makes me panic. If I misunderstand someone on reddit I feel the need to apologise a billion times, and whenever my mother gets just slightly angry it drags me down for days. It's especially bad when I'm in a student-teacher environment as I feel an intense pressure to not disappoint the teacher. Back in school I got praised for being so mature and apologetic, when in fact I was just afraid of misbehaving and disappointing others. It's less pronounced with my boyfriend because he's very understanding and I trust him when he says I didn't upset him when I think I do.
I basically make myself the perpetrator, rather than the victim, in a conflict situation. My thoughts spiral into how I could have prevented this, what I did wrong, whether I am at fault. 
Due to external circumstances (anxiety and panic disorder diagnosis, high cost of living...) I have to live at home with my parents for the time being. I live in the basement.
Unfortunately my mum's and my personality clash terribly, and whenever I do something my mother perceives as unacceptable (e.g. telling her to please not go through my stuff while I'm away) she becomes verbally aggressive and starts to play games (in this case banning me from entering my parents part of the house). She's the type of person who doesn't tell you when she wants something, she just wants me to read her and gets upset when I fail to do so. She let's her emotions affect her actions directly and feeling her anger makes me want to die. My father (65M) disagrees with her behaviour but he's not opposed her until today, where he promised me to talk to her.

My mother is not a bad person, quite the opposite, but I wish I could somehow be less affected by her attitude until I can move out. She's so understanding and supportive when it comes to my mental health, but I am afraid of telling her that she might have contributed to my anxiety.
My therapist has helped me realize this whole pattern, but I'm just not sure how to escape this way of thinking, especially as long as I am in daily contact with my mother? Has anyone here dealt with a similar situation in the past and can offer advise as to how to stop blaming myself?",7.783749999999998,7.7898187638888965,7.959365079365082,70.05785714285715,62.75,11.009523809523811,37.64285714285714,10.608840637214634,4.098588095238095,2163,99,374,48,28,706,252,504,0.159,0.762,0.079,-0.987,3,0,2,0,0,1,56.0,0,1,0,4,24,32,3,8,23,0,33,2,0,10,3,83,62,42,1,11,17,10,3,1,0,1,2,1,1,4,18,24,0,5,14,3,1,7,10,23,0,2,7,5,73,9,70,47,5,52,1,5,1,0,53,21,0,4,22,274,91,5,0.0,0.10001013924786313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.088509556317146,0.12914437418902802,0.0,0.0,0.05902030868013729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930446068963169,0.06490484147033387,0.14095495933910385,0.05145457091868965,0.09322243480761827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465236132610613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671066759628572,0.0,0.07271035370813407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134786461625279,0.0,0.0,0.05443642843302315,0.08702134343413677,0.0,0.0,0.08760258215598928,0.0,0.09673932741102123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051237855720223,0.09494807736845624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055750945330946135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498290535632342,0.1280382540816723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881997995944547,0.0,0.0479712330659958,0.0,0.06750910010662317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972217115065706,0.0,0.0,0.056577164372123824,0.08918209807394954,0.08466849712155304,0.0,0.0,0.097395948841452,0.18072185392718906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631329732490152,0.0,0.0412376755813148,0.0,0.2236024636498693,0.07469876871887399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902976672592368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506380376555546,0.0895439625382623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971276001311666,0.0,0.06258775143735867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981647788858943,0.198070117049296,0.18745105543364088,0.09140606052163668,0.08057735898942524,0.0,0.294808600456063,0.0,0.09265506454115424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897787124938239,0.0844312318220066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712493940445885,0.0,0.08542579673840055,0.06726255821019557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897571332205852,0.0,0.0,0.14303790937647515,0.12996340444373874,0.0,0.0,0.059744692686451065,0.0,0.0,0.07056919335755593,0.0,0.0,0.09662741169106563,0.0,0.0957856403616267,0.07955390837223185,0.0,0.0,0.06784426631832513,0.2213299591785859,0.0,0.0,0.09800464623284877,0.0,0.16225646360006302,0.0,0.13402166584697722,0.09843842167186563,0.0,0.08000928383396007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245473173086466,0.17574422102593434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13929152294982292,0.14935876559606456,0.20099835260108828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761654428308087,0.09423895271717414,0.09706548248888056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228732350014686,0.0,0.05435623553740113
mentalhealth,bunnybearmouse,2020/01/15,"Student Project on Anxiety  

Hello,

I'm working on a school project to see if apps could better help people with anxiety and panic attacks. I decided to do this project after missing a call from my friend at 5am when she was having a panic attack. As someone who suffers from them, I know how much it sucks to suffer without someone there. I need to interview a few people about their experiences, so if anyone is willing to help, I would really appreciate it.

[Anxiety Survey](https://forms.gle/tj8R98C1RRqTYER19)

Thanks very much for any help!",6.9655803571428585,8.929858802083338,7.212738095238098,67.77750000000003,65.14583333333334,9.652380952380954,35.589285714285715,9.957137785484203,4.022716071428572,439,21,66,10,7,142,71,96,0.239,0.588,0.174,-0.7579,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,2,5,11,3,2,4,0,7,0,0,1,0,11,14,7,0,5,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,0,0,1,1,8,3,16,10,3,5,0,3,1,0,11,3,1,2,2,49,12,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983914691576864,0.0,0.3706871012359664,0.0,0.0,0.11293854791624768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675046628671978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285132482756546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16492999126978333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12896058657730355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579975649942567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12478996060184006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247903780393274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876717448079048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23747158709841615,0.11976504228377904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37901786529756026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22395527810635174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034738556421171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16346687528373402,0.12871053749585198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737107640270877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14870592614963982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327092564232834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569952771087606,0.0,0.11758849242850693,0.0,0.0,0.11473918228774632,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Galaxy_Life,2020/01/15,"14, and trying to be happy again & looking for advice. I know, I know. I dont consider my self as being in a broken down mental state, just that I caused my self to go into one in the Summer of 2019, wasting my whole summer over being sad over a relationship that barely lasted, and I still blame myself for being a wuss and wasting the whole summer that couldve been amazing!

I like the music that I liked back then, but now it just makes me kinda sad/question life. I'm not depressed, and never considered myself being depressed. Just get sad occasionally.


Is there anyway I can put my self into a positive state listening to the same music and not get emotional, I just randomly get emotional, not because of the ""break-up"" as I considered it back then. I agree, It was a mistake from my point by getting into a relationship and not being prepared, but at least now I guess I've learned?


Many thanks! 😁",5.5885053929121735,6.045939971751416,6.618787878787881,76.26882896764252,67.36158192090396,8.922239342578326,29.085259373394965,8.841846274778883,2.3016146892655365,713,23,130,11,11,239,100,177,0.121,0.726,0.153,0.8753,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,0,12,10,0,0,11,0,11,1,0,2,1,30,24,12,0,1,10,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,3,7,9,0,0,3,0,0,2,6,5,0,1,2,2,20,5,20,16,4,27,0,4,1,0,6,10,0,3,15,101,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400414241388514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485828407207131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108926203928402,0.0,0.0835946059369974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408726952499494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23622377912100995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16071808941830082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.308510865813426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28658396559060634,0.0,0.07793547303699683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106674069816708,0.0,0.0,0.1459799333859415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507287032210748,0.11178116564525918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968606321971583,0.13399187587921832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515663384648148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153690649696199,0.1390306761220094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819715194050575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576491997555112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292442736494028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963439304117386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13785588498004328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944576407378631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4291768362378768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951406948438967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12625304083929498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310386203408287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062067363755259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asswaterv2,2020/01/15,oppositional defiance disorder i have a few diagnoses but the only one that seems to upset me is symptoms related to oppositional defiance disorder. can anyone else diagnosed share ways they deal w it? it interferes a lot w my personal and work life.,4.807272727272732,8.098132454545457,7.687454545454546,55.62118181818184,76.72727272727272,13.52,36.07272727272728,11.602472056035307,6.815905454545455,204,12,29,11,5,74,37,44,0.18899999999999997,0.7509999999999999,0.06,-0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,5,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,2,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,20,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16141380073853245,0.2365303407504892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379934314678423,0.0,0.4686103036317656,0.0,0.0,0.5291420145878474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19284329879932666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16305427607848408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196258120633821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15642810593221104,0.17556977523667167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015669595524974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101547133488356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23993873620466946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18323584294436845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805958493529438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mightymoonmouse,2020/01/15,"Why do I feel this way? Hi all. So... I have this weird feeling I can't really describe when a friend or my boyfriend suggests I watch something or check something out. Even if it's something I know I already enjoy, I immediately start feeling... hate? towards whatever it is they told me to check out. Like, I don't want to look at it at all and doing so makes me feel... bad. Like anger, or just generally feeling upset. 

An example occurred just this morning. My boyfriend asked me to check out the new Pokemon animation that went up on YouTube, and I LOVE LOVE LOVE Pokemon! But I started getting this ugly feeling deep inside and didn't want to watch it. I tried to force myself to watch it, and it's beautifully animated and looks like something I would really enjoy, but the feeling just wouldn't go away and I decided to save it for later on. Just because it was suggested by someone else. Also, I adore my boyfriend. We have our little spats, but we have wonderful communication and always work things out, so it's not because I have something against him. I'm just so confused.

I don't want to s\*\*t on things other people want me to watch because they think I'd like it... that's just... rude. And it doesn't make sense either. Does anyone know what this could be?",2.9893223024115483,5.2253648623481785,3.9334835416299967,85.98903362084141,76.48987854251013,6.400915331807783,27.338320718183407,7.423996415210882,1.5235785601126561,999,41,194,13,23,321,127,247,0.098,0.722,0.18,0.9693,0,0,5,0,0,0,46.0,3,0,2,1,13,19,3,2,4,0,17,4,1,2,2,55,48,21,0,8,15,0,7,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,22,14,0,0,12,0,3,2,7,7,0,0,4,13,30,12,24,40,3,22,0,0,6,3,15,14,0,6,9,129,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474252083856,0.0903980978298706,0.09405838816736692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904024061468543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567719995603536,0.0,0.10620486057938676,0.0,0.09438373122017747,0.2067245202755435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025329244041608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892212121111543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443046795434153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466189574398388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4000951675658167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733447254502526,0.0,0.059058767549777916,0.0,0.06424327301757247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160365981279154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12424772514076345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220902660336942,0.11329584017831652,0.0,0.0,0.1898503667122725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060692116872225,0.0,0.1509102401284389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917479759167074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836774686346153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14483271829114006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577847885725314,0.43511881706719396,0.0,0.0,0.16002067732244007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019759043196265,0.07243150824428557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801462476732077,0.0,0.07674678287776092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26669583255045043,0.08972594071443751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478927123596153,0.10200107492655668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258712674918434,0.08229451242776432,0.0,0.0,0.0803004177340855,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NOTLinkDev,2020/01/15,"I keep hearing electronic noises in my head? Sorry if this is the wrong subreddit to post, but I have to ask someone since my mother doesn't want to take me to a psychiatrist because she thinks I'm fine. So my problem is that I keep hearing noises in my head, sometimes its a phone ringing and a computer opening or someone picking up a phone, at first I was thinking its just background noise but now that I keep hearing it even when I'm in the middle of nowhere is kind of scaring me, could I have a problem? Or is it just my mind playing tricks on me? I always had hearing problems but It seems as if this is different.",5.92404761904762,5.468210928571434,6.507777777777778,80.465,66.69841269841271,8.787301587301588,37.04761904761904,7.957251820313856,2.8555523809523806,491,24,97,5,7,161,75,126,0.177,0.789,0.034,-0.9531,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,6,9,1,1,7,0,11,2,2,1,0,24,26,11,0,7,9,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,9,2,0,3,3,1,0,0,1,6,0,1,2,5,16,3,13,23,0,12,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,5,3,71,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823077817969882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160027202190067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929101676161307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038523438943554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589812605649873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859116899001516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063964119359501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669839162856431,0.0,0.5864048509787904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468433661144312,0.0,0.1354505405729754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133619196134255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457354371062765,0.0,0.0,0.3733855795687149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022530990110553,0.0,0.0,0.11841316070976213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759735419701466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204200922759344,0.0,0.12864507395618607,0.14560556606869018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779836687592833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16669047077564336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672015770368144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14221390993810862,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,edgydepressedteen420,2020/01/15,"I feel like I can’t open up to my therapist and I need proper help Hi.
I’ve been seeing my current therapist for well over a year now, but I still can’t bring myself to really open up to her and it frustrates me sometimes. I don’t think it’s her fault, I think it’s mine. I’ve never been able to openly share my feelings with anyone in my twenty one years of living, so I literally don’t know how to do it. I don’t feel like I’ve received an accurate enough diagnosis, yet I’m too scared to say something about it because I don’t how to bring it up, seeing as I’ve been going there for almost two years. I also don’t know how to tell her that all I want is to die and that I gave up on life years ago. Sometimes, I don’t think there’s anyone out there who can help me because, years ago, I decided that I was done with all of this and that feeling only grows stronger each year. To be honest, I would like to try inpatient, but once again, I don’t know how to bring it up. I’m desperate here. How do I tell my therapist how bad things really are? How do I get the care that I actually need? I don’t know what else to do besides do the one thing my brain has been telling me to do all these years. I need to get rid of this pain.",1.6405714285714268,2.6734366444444437,3.5405820105820105,92.57833333333336,77.0,6.920634920634923,21.375661375661377,7.447530270364453,0.4297883597883603,954,23,232,12,21,323,124,270,0.109,0.767,0.124,-0.3864,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,20,12,1,1,4,0,28,3,1,7,4,42,55,16,1,5,2,0,4,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,19,11,0,0,12,0,0,6,11,5,1,3,7,7,36,7,33,46,5,33,0,0,2,0,14,12,0,1,18,154,55,0,0.09819744567843257,0.0,0.09582654183031508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740922213981926,0.0,0.09833055725531037,0.0,0.0,0.07852846183128256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732387444539218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199076543144501,0.11972050289966782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096208252222463,0.0,0.0,0.10011884038584763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191344523694247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049008035396978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08203136544331505,0.0,0.0,0.10146421121765817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19860631615250635,0.14030454962689926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260822483374953,0.0,0.05580787134007692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163935584987144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21586699223921266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935975992615624,0.14392293544173096,0.0,0.08671014359465956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21843648514572456,0.0757359237877096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045770748295995,0.1330822611231499,0.07468358238482066,0.10448900563655357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258155963818135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809055016036069,0.09831277380701528,0.0,0.15650130107912022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559719117639065,0.1942395693563084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842060696560793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25748668725171103,0.0,0.0,0.3420444090003739,0.13047603910410593,0.18876287445500167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666961976603139,0.0,0.09592463578090707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0579193976692279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829129670404366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975664798760296,0.0,0.0,0.4426515484103202
mentalhealth,a_cursed_walker,2020/01/15,"Is it possible to become mentally insane over time? Going through a lot right now, just need to know.",3.1515789473684217,5.842012842105267,4.262368421052631,81.4240789473684,78.47368421052632,8.010526315789475,25.28947368421053,8.841846274778883,2.3886631578947366,80,3,14,2,2,26,18,19,0.13699999999999998,0.863,0.0,-0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,10,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4340861754711609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233759409655761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160066821981405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341519205976764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3960958681654358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914371171365547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4430980105387281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3356573954803483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291870946684691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayacount8941,2020/01/15,"just needed to vent Hi everyone,

I don't know exactly how to start, but I've been really sad. I'm an 18 y/o male who graduated high school in 2019, and went to a community college for a month before dropping out due to my mental health. After dropping out, I began speaking through video chat to a therapist, who diagnosed me with anxiety and said that while I didn't seem to be fully depressed, I should be happier with my life. However, her treatments didn't help very much and I haven't been to talk to a professional in around 2 months now. Recently, I've had some good news in my life too. I've gotten into a school that I think will be a much better fit for me and I've met a girl who really cares about me that I've taken a liking to as well. But in the past week or so, I've been very unhappy for no discernible reason. I've been unable to think about a positive future for myself, and I feel like a complete failure. My parents are very well off and have invested a lot of time and resources into making sure I can get the future I want for myself. And I've done just about nothing with it. I am not suicidal and I have never once been suicidal, but recently there have been many instances where I've thought that it wouldn't matter or change the world badly if I were to die. My mother's side of the family (which I take after) has a long line of serious depression and I'm concerned not that I've started experiencing it, but that I haven't yet and that somehow I can get worse. I also had a fight with one of my good friends a few months ago, which led to some serious trust issues on my side, and I now have difficulties talking to people I trust about things like this, because I feel like everyone will betray me. So I came here to vent, and I really needed it. Thanks for letting me vent.",6.9367237237237225,5.341620948648653,7.670990990990994,76.67705705705707,65.18918918918922,11.141141141141148,32.71771771771772,10.125756701596842,2.944186186186186,1421,45,295,27,18,478,188,370,0.147,0.664,0.19,0.9633,2,0,0,0,1,0,34.0,0,0,0,1,21,22,1,0,19,0,32,4,0,4,3,60,59,26,3,6,11,2,2,4,1,4,4,2,0,2,18,23,0,0,9,2,1,3,10,7,2,1,20,5,36,15,47,31,6,45,0,3,0,0,18,17,0,8,27,200,54,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787723335654345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927825735182074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583803586287093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882512053195115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277361928102217,0.060431801526694,0.0,0.08435661918725322,0.0,0.0,0.08767688861476136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338407828721002,0.101074782426379,0.0,0.10487172970557627,0.0,0.10394120551999704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17076973299551665,0.10061998095646957,0.10288652229638427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144956702097987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894555621331764,0.0,0.0,0.09345569490019964,0.0,0.10025131192219043,0.14164418777042226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659148761227806,0.0,0.10358793569980486,0.0,0.0,0.16629953976853315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053759139900074,0.0,0.0,0.06644812904342844,0.10474161487141063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347122786111522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448202653348814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013722971530672,0.14004402401514632,0.19372949626498795,0.0,0.0,0.08773139266171087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428106769178155,0.0,0.0,0.06617341039876486,0.10050737283048587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999048056272588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23738593440510816,0.0,0.1457513251370332,0.14701475516495618,0.07645905594992934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951227465829666,0.0,0.0,0.10557558442000363,0.06717647016282434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11007773241211184,0.0,0.09463561504941853,0.06872775592708219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19052533940356906,0.10192733419797408,0.19576778866867506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430012673445017,0.0,0.0,0.2006599103474243,0.0,0.09024881907713457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033658608897334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168752915805621,0.0,0.0934336039653432,0.0,0.07453721415188308,0.15936198334457335,0.0,0.0912702275538224,0.0,0.11510342471218883,0.06586091695368558,0.1270434641617772,0.0,0.0787021499366891,0.05780644027209673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453903759849584,0.05847241633165835,0.0,0.07952015104001947,0.0,0.17826861697782,0.09189917721929344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010270772447047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,here_but_not_really1,2020/01/15,"Everything feels stressful I'm a mess. Everything in my life feels like a source of pressure or stress. I'm struggling to enjoy anything. I thought I really wanted something and when I got it all I could see was stress and burden from it so I backed out of an amazing opertunity. I feel like crawling away and hiding forever. 

I have an amazing child and partner but I can't get out of this space. On the outside it looks like I really have it together. Inside I'm a wreak. 

My dad recently died. I cared for him in the final stages of his illness and I don't have my mum anymore either. 

All I want is space and time but noone is pressuring me but me. 

How do I get out of this?",0.8727428057553972,3.2130416834532376,2.9089163669064746,89.68049685251799,85.40287769784172,6.064928057553956,23.07598920863309,7.413659706084162,1.085319784172662,530,20,111,9,16,178,82,139,0.182,0.679,0.139,-0.7395,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,4,15,0,6,7,0,10,2,0,1,2,24,25,13,1,3,5,2,3,3,1,0,2,0,0,2,6,9,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,3,5,20,7,15,21,3,16,0,0,2,0,6,9,0,1,9,75,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910161172886306,0.0,0.0,0.13201869415153375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072752340503418,0.1233593410351356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16356718602636094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280888198005368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664990863998728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28836494491297604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433518716477208,0.22921979799929665,0.0,0.17574119142183528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16763416889903365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283090431217596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133151433922222,0.2351312646464212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13471923712327896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055487556496972,0.0,0.15840343920830166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784046103771327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350542399976652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5513096949553766,0.167714330067851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273620273063214,0.09354694160627837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18924935320039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,darksideofthorn,2020/01/15,"Not sure whats wrong with me So over the last like 2 years I'd say, since I started college, I haven't felt the same. My mind always feels blank, like I barely have any thoughts.  I feel like my memory has just gotten worse, forgetting what I'm going to say in a conversation, forgetting words, and just general things. It feels like I'm just becoming more impulsive and stupid. My brain just feels like a space of nothingness, my mind suddenly making me slower and holding me back. I just don't know what to do.",4.6242857142857146,5.667996435643567,5.108429985855729,84.13653465346535,69.79207920792079,9.335785007072136,26.309759547383308,9.606745405546679,2.11547694483734,404,12,83,9,7,129,65,101,0.086,0.7659999999999999,0.14800000000000002,0.6518,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,7,8,1,0,4,0,5,1,1,1,1,27,18,4,0,0,6,0,5,5,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,4,0,1,7,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,3,7,12,6,6,15,2,9,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,10,46,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286582692012675,0.0,0.0,0.11675998550026308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202455054583692,0.0,0.0,0.18962607068210555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916708617499985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472610581863989,0.3679815474830378,0.16485624019077774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757947698805322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09436029226651327,0.1399561362205552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4194129020919488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460921597072625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3467304584643045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730810138205436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202970024156808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215281637046001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618225814758249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406799210874442,0.0,0.0,0.13630840008244222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17497411792827475,0.0,0.18772393753945435,0.0,0.1105673691456305
mentalhealth,makstevet,2020/01/15,"Work-induced anxiety I’ve been feeling incredibly overwhelmed at work recently. I am in my 5th year here and genuinely enjoyed my job the first 4 1/2 but recent structural changes have given me a ton more responsibilities (with a pay raise). This increase in work however has caused me to make a lot more mistakes and I have hard time dealing with disappointing people. I feel like I’m so overwhelmed all the time that my brain gets overloaded with thinking about multiple things simultaneously. While this is happening it causes me to get anxious and I can feel my heart rate go up and chest get tight. This makes me get impulses to distract myself with something like my phone because only then can I keep myself from thinking about stress triggers. Sometimes I can’t fall asleep because I don’t have any distractions available and my mind is left to wonder. I try to think about relaxing stuff but stressful things keep popping in and I dwell on them. All of this causes difficulty concentrating, to the point where I have to write everything down because my brain can’t remember things like it used to. Has anyone dealt with something like this? Thank you in advance.",5.587237945492665,8.063192514150945,5.2561635220125815,78.35602725366878,69.61320754716981,8.107337526205452,32.06079664570231,8.841846274778883,2.8999519916142567,951,43,160,18,18,292,130,212,0.13699999999999998,0.725,0.138,-0.19899999999999998,2,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,4,6,16,0,7,6,0,15,5,5,7,2,37,36,11,0,1,2,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,12,11,0,3,8,1,1,4,3,9,0,1,2,5,25,7,26,34,7,23,0,3,0,0,5,11,0,2,12,104,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07509788823091135,0.0,0.08448056173939171,0.12475729386323604,0.0,0.0772169730604325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201955884609006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465583888376111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34033379866519564,0.11682294425621148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138510604553611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924961204108823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16751397336314822,0.07889300147225724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393382976053594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307856973819105,0.0,0.06276133578710573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765509678242948,0.0,0.09892583061044112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086304654527406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095872181898434,0.1963149636343923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119985236510681,0.0,0.0,0.21580696920406772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388576407057628,0.0,0.0,0.1474291051737513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150534622131447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398889402670494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655999211670397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439440930001788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180775460365688,0.0,0.1250984972014268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003267051958984,0.10922056819930734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530001157864947,0.0,0.12641879401012612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167141073868437,0.0,0.0,0.2200993418782413,0.2122820645786221,0.0,0.0,0.1287881599457989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497641985727796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537822480891514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975933765045844,0.24118853003499535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111491059636837
mentalhealth,RealityFan11,2020/01/15,"My love/hate relationship with summer Every year, summer comes around and I get happy. It’s beautiful outside, memories of my childhood pops up, I get a break from college, and how can you forget ice cream! I normally keep my fan on all year round but in the summer, it’s normal. I can read on my balcony with a drink and it’s so calm and relaxful. Or walk around town. 

And then I feel lonely. Everyone goes out with their friends in the summer; I don’t have a lot of friends and they normally go out with others. People go to the beach; but I’m an overweight and unconfident  loner. I stay cooped up in my room because seeing others so happy in the sunny weather just makes me feel depressed again. 

I don’t think it’s just seasonal either. I could make a case for every single season, but summer is the one where it hurts the most.",4.042931726907632,5.225552590361449,5.0881325301204825,83.22187751004017,71.28915662650601,7.702008032128515,25.279116465863446,8.07648339933343,1.4501020080321283,654,19,128,9,12,215,101,166,0.109,0.735,0.156,0.8511,0,2,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,2,0,9,9,0,0,11,0,7,2,0,3,1,38,20,15,0,4,7,0,3,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,7,16,2,1,3,4,0,4,2,3,0,1,0,5,18,6,21,19,5,33,1,3,3,0,6,15,0,3,12,89,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762724018367707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945915633370479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13366715347623134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389241513598105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336496315401162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200973029748294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26147862628139423,0.14827373462596785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15691950399858942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23977139084146915,0.0,0.16214219224250515,0.0,0.17637593123025053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303674910608784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611510296292406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792422552517772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13192189792918307,0.14004901394494773,0.0,0.207157363600961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4561075764054298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051487324825037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757690013457742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521424180442267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16659692489564076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365219302296362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539297216433702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942811221264397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19985168294278766
mentalhealth,drawstrawtree,2020/01/15,"unmeditation seeking data
54yo male
recently bereft of mental liveliness
uncalled for notions completely absent from brain pan
notions may be pumped through with effort
stressfull onset aided by 

come up with something slightly annoying

this is too easy

insult me bad

keep it up

come up with something slightly confusing

this is good
we will always be here for you

(somewhat irritatingly during pre-sleep repetitions of annoying things we have heard occurred for the first few nights)",10.496962025316456,12.321266291139242,8.794784810126583,60.14989873417725,56.9746835443038,10.876962025316457,42.382278481012655,10.793553405168565,5.349291645569622,403,21,50,9,5,122,63,79,0.17300000000000001,0.737,0.09,-0.7796,0,0,2,0,0,0,3.0,2,1,0,2,2,6,3,1,1,0,7,1,1,0,0,11,11,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,4,7,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,5,0,1,1,1,4,1,14,6,2,9,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,3,4,35,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106372916272889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21136587501925416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825940399691237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4361247764970465,0.26541818572294035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21532538857791594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123263912088851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22500730533396374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551110709360453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375598542158804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24995059000655515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533282664133373,0.0,0.0,0.3897674665656317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817858711994055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,igetnauseousalot,2020/01/15,"Today I quit my job after having the worst mental breakdown of my life on the way home last night. So I took a major step this morning. after being abruptly fired from a job I worked for ten years, with no prior disciplinary action, my mental health began to decline. actually it started with my last boss there who was batshit crazy. I started smoking a lot of weed at that time because she was driving me up a wall every single day. She was only there for a few months, everybody complained about her, but in the end they accepted her decision to get rid of me even though I'd been there for ten years and never had a write up.


so anyway, back to the original story. Fast forward less than 2 months and I found a job. more money, more responsibility. it was okay at first, but it was a management position which I had no experience in. I did my best for as long as I could but with shitty employees constantly not showing up or not doing their work I no longer felt I had the patience to be there. At the end of 4 months, I suffered from the biggest mental breakdown. I use that phrase bc I'm not officially diagnosed by a psych, only my PCPs who say I'm depressed and anxious. I don't know if these things are panic attacks, anxiety attacks, or something completely different altogether. 


Fast forward another 2 months, and I confide in my immediate supervisor that im having trouble coping with physical and mental illnesses and that I'm not sure if management was right for me, (also due to an allergy of something that was common I  the workplace) and that I'd be looking to leave soon...but I needed time because I didn't want to get fired not did I wish to quit without anything lined up. the next day that I come in, a random employee says ""hey, I heard you were quitting!"" .... ok..... so that's what we're doing now? telling private convos to regular employees? ok. strike 1. 


Strike 2 was when a rent-a-manager who was only slightly above me in the chain of command, yet had been there less time than I, had sent me home after I told him I wouldn't scrub a bunch of trashcans..... look, I'm all for gender equality, but as a female, I'm not climbing into industrial sized trash cans to clean them out, ESPECIALLY when there's more than a half dozen young men who's legit job it is to clean the trashcans when they're done their shift, and when HE KNOWS I suffered from chronic pain (back surgery 2 years ago) and Illness (nausea related, if you can't tell by my username). I said plus ""I heard [boss' name] gave that list TO YOU to do"". he sent me home. 



And strike 3 was yesterday. Monday night I was texted by my boss telling me it was my ""lucky day"" and that I was being sent to work at another facility the next day, for the week. 20 miles/1hr away.  She said that many of the managers in training from the district have been helping out at the facility while the new Manager's hiring process was being completed. I have an anxiety attack that night. But remembered that I had been looking at a paper with the time/date/name given to me, that was up on the bulletin board at work the past few days. she knew this whole time and decided to tell me a few hours before I was about to go to bed for my next shift. I wake up, make my way up those 20 miles. The work is actually not too bad, there was another manager there, they just needed somebody to help out. cool. I can do this for the week even though the drive sucks. then as the hours go by, we get to talking.... she tells me that NOBODY has been there, I'm the first person. EXCUSE ME WHAT. sooooo..... who lied to who? the district manager to my boss? or my boss to me? interesting.... the manager also proceeds to tell me how she was supposed to be there for a few weeks and ended up there for 9 months so far. WHAT?! no. nope. then I ended up being there for 10+ hours. And the lady tells me she's taking off tomorrow. soooo.... you just expect me to run this building after only being here one day???


I got there at 8am, though my day started at 230am bc I woke up with an anxiety attack for the days events. it was now 5:30pm. I had done nothing for the past hour. the mgr hadn't told me I could go yet, and I started getting anxious.... So I stood up and said, to myself, you know what? I'm a fuckin manager I can leave if I fuckin want to, I'm not waiting around for her!!! so I hold back tears as I tell her I'll be in at the discussed time the next day (which was today). When I get outside it's foggy and raining. I do not have the best night vision with driving. I wear glasses it's just way too much glare in combination with the wet roads, all I saw was shining lights from every direction, I started panicking immediately cause I couldn't even get out of the parking lot. I spent the next 30 minutes a wreck... just completely sobbing til my eyes were puffy n burning and my voice was hoarse.  I was scared to drive because of the state I was in. I was literally screaming crying and shaking. I've been having more fucked up thoughts lately of suicide, not that I would ever do that to those I love, but those visions kept flashing in my head and I was literally scared of and for myself. 


For the past month or two, especially last night,  Id get visions of getting into a car crash on the way to or from work so that I don't have to go.  I've been spacing out and disassociating while driving to/from work the past few weeks. while I was in the shower last night I wished that I could just run away from everyone and everything and start over new. 


I woke up this morning crying. My fiance asked if I didn't feel like going into work. I shook my head. he was about to leave and I couldn't not get some kind of answer/closure to what I could do. so I went up to him and I just stared cause it wouldn't come out of my mouth and he asked if I could just make it through the week...I shook my head and he said ""you can't just quit your job like that""  and I just bowed my head in defeat, my face frowned up started to cry and walked back to the room. he continues to leave and just said ""do what you're gonna do. just do what you're gonna do."" 


So I did. I wrote an email of immediate resignation. Uploaded my picture onto Uber, and started driving within the hour. I had already set up my account after that first talk with my boss, but didn't plan on starting til after the new year anyway cause I didn't want to claim like 3 days of driving on this year's taxes. 


anyway. yup I did it. kinda scared to tell my parents even though I'm in my early 30s and don't live with them (they're very traditional but ultimate wanna see the best for me so hopefully they'll understand).",2.7870044709388964,4.3908428420268235,4.036703427719825,87.85095678092401,75.1251862891207,6.966438152011922,24.86766020864381,7.686295010490155,1.161188733233979,5162,170,1090,70,110,1691,474,1342,0.138,0.809,0.053,-0.9987,14,0,2,0,0,1,200.0,1,7,7,21,69,44,8,7,71,5,106,20,9,14,5,163,198,87,1,26,42,1,5,3,0,6,7,11,8,2,58,57,0,3,13,1,4,31,32,27,0,9,85,26,151,17,179,91,26,228,0,6,8,4,82,70,5,18,128,737,209,32,0.0,0.0,0.06869574990373767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031200634690891488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03884153389552139,0.056295171162906416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072356277276026,0.08077842561446458,0.07952675798788136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028964705600191237,0.0313334126830463,0.06581019072699898,0.1601698466086602,0.06613878995442297,0.10825942550272627,0.029388606793659407,0.06436856821027037,0.0,0.02995064772170772,0.0,0.11081343445656062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084731914400684,0.0,0.06063939871219385,0.11071234694892068,0.038036206255694836,0.0,0.1405124849947394,0.0,0.11598905222331507,0.22699602737929025,0.0,0.030315724858089508,0.035724921558349235,0.0,0.036774101926388685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203892883901344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12469884927975088,0.0,0.0,0.0929909876680126,0.03183833205074852,0.0593111555884733,0.03363290785618811,0.031633420511009806,0.0344301015832508,0.0,0.0,0.017797013180171833,0.025145241776002667,0.033795308864537216,0.0,0.0,0.08981742928509871,0.0,0.03859245803082485,0.0,0.03253970371661025,0.16550409560209814,0.0,0.10001831170706688,0.0,0.028150813668844588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14449196666792682,0.03741350600196393,0.0,0.0,0.047184548738933484,0.0,0.10591847983422184,0.03495925501117933,0.17331320758820976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038019552724761776,0.0,0.17464141593802693,0.0,0.0,0.03665298506724218,0.05803120133040394,0.11476328334523063,0.03970453532982776,0.149077115944795,0.0,0.0,0.02486117431696351,0.05158745056262263,0.0,0.031080211310576162,0.03114885424596015,0.08867160216293044,0.0,0.0,0.05984764663084989,0.031767295760388184,0.0,0.046989472136097145,0.035684940270046865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14188399999320278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856679568140284,0.0,0.025874357200477958,0.052197292687425054,0.02714663380246877,0.10198246530583384,0.1871657503907485,0.19818392571289709,0.0,0.03377313956719365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023850870416800472,0.10707773857701282,0.03745283123964385,0.041296913672486765,0.039082877161793005,0.0,0.13440073798977326,0.0,0.030733271389723617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14974833335658422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03987212933013625,0.030058640928665968,0.16740535023496322,0.055981242787208105,0.10571710498144432,0.0,0.02804800745491289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05419381352271119,0.0,0.0,0.22421799994017333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03850056771036158,0.0,0.033173412883270234,0.0,0.02646428774326546,0.05658115118140245,0.2768790472837932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02338378589983312,0.0,0.1383262344111685,0.027943039804172003,0.12314436106968517,0.0,0.0667266024115329,0.06726581571237622,0.039105936468135816,0.0,0.0,0.034383035552304944,0.03664204389973748,0.0,0.03039950918624225,0.0,0.029041786233389263,0.06228154091022976,0.1117531742709521,0.14116734724099153,0.0,0.0,0.032628617757902684,0.0,0.03929697172823007,0.0809512290018778,0.03392932388384911,0.0,0.2049947410003175,0.0,0.0,0.02500343408387236,0.0,0.0,0.11333081435958035
mentalhealth,pupc,2020/01/15,"I feel confused/fuzzy when I think about myself Hello,

I'm currently examining myself, my thoughts and my behaviours but when I do, my thoughts sort of feel fuzzy(?). I think it's confusion I feel, but I can't even see whether that is the emotion I am feeling. It's alarming and scary and I've felt this way for a while. I can't even remember if I used to be like this. Have you ever experienced anything like this?

Thank you",1.6401033591731284,3.9385531395348887,3.0924806201550403,89.91052971576227,81.55813953488372,6.612919896640828,25.834625322997407,7.793537801064563,1.4844330749354009,334,14,71,6,9,109,55,86,0.106,0.745,0.149,0.5533,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,0,6,5,0,2,2,0,7,0,0,1,1,22,20,10,0,1,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,11,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,7,16,3,4,16,0,6,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,7,48,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18990166106580364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595819276402005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30483898690461153,0.20874205405222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4667311191179263,0.0,0.2215726055770828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254822975984809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614141394889037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18389150156730175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21245934158650245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957324800440819,0.0,0.3664066016956234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19930868173624536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317218303860405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fkffck1918,2020/01/15,"Money problems I know people say money can't buy happiness, and I dont want to be rich or anything I just want to get by better. After coming onto benefits when I lost my job my diet has changed and along with the everyday stresses that are occuring, i Feel my diet is playing  strong part of my bad mental stability right now. This is not the post to ask or give sob storys as this should be somewhere to help others and give words of wisdom but everywhere needs mega karma and i just dont have it to post.
I get benefits in 2 weeks and dont have any money to get by, if anyone could send me anything to get by for this period it would be greatly appreciated, I have cash app and uk bank account , that is all. Sorry for all on here if this post offends you, Im not proud of begging but its the lowest ive ever been in my life",3.4476396917148326,4.204837265895954,5.2429046242774575,83.15121628131024,72.29479768786128,7.8475915221579955,25.399325626204238,8.07648339933343,1.4148308285163775,649,19,135,9,12,223,108,173,0.139,0.742,0.11900000000000001,-0.1718,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,4,6,16,1,1,3,0,20,3,0,0,3,32,34,14,0,9,10,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,10,9,2,0,2,1,8,2,6,6,0,0,2,2,16,10,23,26,3,17,1,2,0,0,7,5,1,4,7,94,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104063742902453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360958894271533,0.0,0.22033796936350356,0.0,0.12515649208010668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178131814491188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11840291949695707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162362700157946,0.11532278421967135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688952286038847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4707069203919269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210989942175791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676920007229191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27977986457550896,0.2568531505875617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759935701406676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251406532563968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08973462218101415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14460963558744674,0.0,0.13285180759544052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357504473065445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456095878557212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461420570925276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349160633427396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926775741977292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449752457018743,0.0,0.09281313560288428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38465015277273296,0.0,0.0,0.1281017675237365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432983292613247,0.0,0.1064639973252246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986382491984354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335512324924908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15792770279816448,0.0,0.10738768437994163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510205229081067,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,princessessen,2020/01/15,"My Brain Hates Me!! Does anyone ever feel like they can't be great in life, because of their brain not allowing them to?",3.017500000000002,4.763005750000001,3.3483333333333327,92.43000000000002,74.83333333333334,6.466666666666668,20.333333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.29348333333333354,94,2,20,1,2,29,23,24,0.23199999999999998,0.6829999999999999,0.085,-0.6459999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,3,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,2,3,2,1,1,4,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,5,2,3,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096529586499629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18277781445758667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.669434369815527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623893250647228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712196764669797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15160656497680114,0.21420356846272326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3305712827322415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960269009045555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21178369658587387,0.14648518258901566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HollowScarecrow,2020/01/15,"Is it OCD or something else? Things have to fit together for me. Usually this involves entertainment (books, movies, Music) which are my main interests. They all have to go together in some way. If I am watching outdoor movies or westerns, I have to red the same thing as well and listen to music that would fit in with area (alt country, etc). If it's 90's music, I need 90's movies and books set in that time period. 80's the same way. Maybe even go as far as to dress in a certain way. maybe not full blown, but just inspired by it. That is just an example, there can be a lot of different areas. And, I may jump quickly between different areas, even as quickly as in the same day. This is starting to strain my life. I can't just like what I like. I can't mix anything together without feeling like it's not right. I have no idea what it would be. Someone suggested OCD or maybe a lack of identity. It's starting to become a serious negative in my life and causing even greater anxiety.",2.733983957219252,4.554657419191924,4.08972667855021,86.48596256684496,75.81818181818181,7.689126559714795,28.31372549019608,8.4952907291091,2.090570053475936,771,33,158,15,17,254,110,198,0.111,0.7909999999999999,0.098,-0.5374,2,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,1,0,10,10,0,1,8,0,17,2,0,1,2,33,24,15,0,6,12,0,1,3,0,3,2,1,0,0,16,5,0,0,3,3,0,3,7,2,1,0,0,4,13,8,25,19,11,29,0,0,2,0,4,14,0,8,11,114,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949923506344404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778936329594188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15808331359823538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14704088866831214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923113733824322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990949130627997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957240201909798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596353318332593,0.2836214541812139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237425023398424,0.1022569350298633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16269584668359513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158398741013133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022034633464543,0.20978818289083795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168976078530876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4314003643803545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613409913931812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223801703358335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127931828352875,0.11019367635790864,0.0,0.0,0.202625880975394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19018741571961847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346419998245506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764492677139452,0.0,0.0,0.34084590981279406,0.0,0.0,0.1286971436746175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797873565523114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033605051336639,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,___Mike__,2020/01/15,"Sudden onset of gynophobia Recently (it's been 4  months), I had a rather unfortunate incident with two friends: a girl I liked and a long-time male friend. It's a little complicated, but basically she refused to give me an answer as to whether she liked me or not (she did but she wouldn't admit it to me because of later obvious reasons). The problem arose from the fact that they started dating and gaslighted me into thinking they aren't. Lots of lies and deception that just didn't need to be there.

After finding out, I had a pretty serious breakdown and there's been a lot of weird things that resulted from that. For example, I'm not as much as a clean freak as I used to be, and I'm suddenly no longer scared of spiders. The bad thing is that I seem to have also developed a weird form of gynophobia. I'm okay with being around her and any woman I knew BEFORE the incident, but any new person immediately triggers anxious feelings. I have trouble speaking and I'm extremely anxious about being around unfamiliar women.

Fortunately, I don't really have to interact with unknown women at work but I'm becoming more worried since this is the polar opposite of how I used to be. I grew up with mostly female friends so I never really had issues of this sort. Something similar happened after my ex-gf broke up with me, but it kinda went away quickly.

Is this a normal (ish) thing to happen for some time, or is it worrisome to the point where I should look into some counselling? Has anyone heard of something similar to this? I've been meaning to go to therapy for a while due to various circumstances, but I've been putting it off until I have adequate finances. This, however, is a lot more problematic since there are some significant logistical issues with having to avoid 50% of the population.",6.510427599611268,7.072818623906707,7.396326530612246,71.1260544217687,65.38483965014578,10.731584062196307,34.70068027210884,10.608840637214634,3.885700097181732,1440,63,250,36,21,483,187,343,0.16899999999999998,0.7440000000000001,0.087,-0.983,1,1,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,2,1,13,16,0,2,19,1,30,0,0,6,3,64,52,25,0,6,13,0,1,2,3,2,0,2,1,6,19,18,0,2,9,0,1,4,8,10,0,1,12,4,26,6,54,33,12,33,0,1,1,0,22,13,0,12,18,192,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930798609319927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15830317837907326,0.0,0.0,0.2629831092426532,0.0,0.08138505987473489,0.0,0.0,0.20722983053895824,0.0,0.0,0.10935554940144414,0.0,0.09718373270143922,0.07095241330812724,0.12854750522577132,0.09904231809482716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05885206413251842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063815743936294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697760490832063,0.0,0.0,0.11165527632204053,0.06614912328736823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20585282182690465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24296920294386215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372799537423195,0.11665689103124426,0.0,0.10300460808671584,0.09774124763511874,0.0,0.0,0.29686084137055224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678667207449076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290420223534822,0.0,0.08556263424284975,0.08630432493601478,0.08976986291749542,0.11241359299656972,0.0,0.0,0.11404094309050412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163033765942546,0.0,0.0,0.1100295040679745,0.0,0.0,0.1184140604773055,0.0,0.11137288538205874,0.0,0.11700764204132345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14912934675144468,0.11967193035302358,0.11492456540371668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653022484326915,0.0,0.0,0.10596029491033372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19256385546927454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17921084604116416,0.0,0.0,0.08238393699084168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13310614112288965,0.0,0.2319800609528073,0.07458027188980106,0.0,0.0,0.06787000119871747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136995625563376,0.0,0.0,0.20105327181743854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078979649789178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473587338816035,0.11820327583603325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xtomaten,2020/01/15,"I don't know what it is Ok so I don't know how to explain this, I am very scared of knives, guns, balconys. 'Cause let's say I stand on a balcony or I hold a knife I'm just so scared that I will have a mental breakdown and jump off the balcony or stab myself and that is quite frightening. P.S I'm between 10-20.",-0.14685714285714369,1.5679528857142877,1.7957142857142865,99.99928571428572,84.42857142857143,4.571428571428573,20.0,5.288315135182226,-0.4791428571428571,242,7,61,1,7,80,50,70,0.20800000000000002,0.759,0.033,-0.9096,0,0,0,1,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,2,4,1,8,0,0,2,0,11,13,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,1,7,1,5,11,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,0,37,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31290077665599153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3347925459830492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114668415937565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30695796724202923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239720053509977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24222447196959684,0.6099011896924428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513210134393107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xUnika,2020/01/15,"i am confusion Recent years had their great moments and awful moments.

It all started with PTSD. Got treated for it and now the condition doesn't give me problems anymore.

Then I started self-harming due to low self-esteem. I wasn't really diagnosed with a mental illness, but I still felt mentally ill, had suicidal thoughts. Got treated for it and now I don't want to self harm or kill myself anymore.

But life just doesn't want me to lead a happy life. 

Now I am starting to develop an eating disorder?

It just feels like when one problem is treated, another problem emerges. It can take half a year, or a year. But feeling mentally ill just comes back to kick me in the face each time.

I feel so fake due to this. No way it is possible that all this happens one after another, right? Isn't it more logical if all of the above just emerge at the same time, without ""breaks"" of feeling well? 

Will I have to go in and out of treatment for all kinds of different things my whole life? I really don't want that. 

I'm confused.",2.92784378437844,4.965677009900993,4.033201320132015,86.13454345434546,75.93069306930694,7.459185918591862,29.04400440044005,8.344100000000001,2.1919991199119915,804,36,158,15,18,261,117,202,0.254,0.6659999999999999,0.08,-0.9916,1,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,1,1,12,17,1,2,9,1,15,9,1,1,4,41,35,13,2,7,11,0,5,1,0,1,7,0,0,1,12,9,1,0,7,0,0,3,8,9,1,3,7,5,15,8,22,27,8,32,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,5,22,108,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22298583479585268,0.0,0.0,0.21089522340772893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175874368693004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159112074754104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791946073466653,0.0,0.11108887229928774,0.12185972101724947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879885778565188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150480931867043,0.07595988498048388,0.10209039933273063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199835222951034,0.06042796900415199,0.0,0.1700785053045848,0.11722566899515438,0.0,0.0,0.0940244353861966,0.11318685248354485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763484719077592,0.11072299700678026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253052834113391,0.05194590221191009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214572089640875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14409957873410406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11986748765733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052211547778069,0.1242903356995282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623133754860475,0.0,0.10498488461989297,0.0,0.0,0.0908025036287442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327661146699032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257759624097652,0.0,0.08491271738582692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630425831710987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994451876725753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063879930773731,0.0,0.0,0.0844115999535006,0.12400002070869555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18814289900617626,0.08439726230756239,0.0,0.0,0.09560055978585516,0.0,0.0,0.11871007163694912,0.0,0.10249523797151854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054129135090814
mentalhealth,stix-and-stones,2020/01/15,"What to do? Who to see? Hey y'all I'm a 26F in NY who has never been to therapy yet. I have known for a long time that I should but was always too nervous about it and put it off far too long.


Currently, what is making me take the plunge is that I'm feeling lost in life, unsure what I should do regarding my life, location, family, relationship, etc. I have no diagnoses (due to never getting into therapy) but I do struggle with anxiety/depression, and I suspect something a bit more sinister like bipolar or BPD as well (I am **not** self-diagnosing, I am just giving an idea on what I *think* could potentially be going on under the surface). My main reason for seeking it out, though, is my general confusion about where my life is going. I need a third party sounding board who will help me come to my own conclusions about the next steps.


I was looking at providers my insurance covers and I'm unsure what level of professional I should see. Should I start with a mental health counselor, psychologist, psychiatrist, etc.? I know the higher the qualifications, the pricier it will be. I did get a callback from one psychologist who said, with my insurance, I'm looking at $85+ for a 45 min session. It's not exactly unaffordable for me, but it's pushing it if it isn't really necessary. I do have an appointment with my PCP in a couple of weeks so I can ask what their opinion is as well, but I'm wondering what this community has for input.

Thanks in advance everyone",3.0769311176628267,5.222604804878049,5.078763066202093,78.31110091128386,75.86411149825784,8.735942106673814,28.111632270168855,9.367010060515213,2.7912579469311183,1157,49,218,31,26,398,164,287,0.099,0.815,0.087,-0.5442,2,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,1,1,3,13,8,0,3,16,0,31,6,0,2,3,41,58,13,0,7,9,0,1,1,0,6,6,2,0,0,22,10,0,0,9,0,0,7,6,4,2,2,6,7,30,4,34,43,6,35,0,1,4,0,12,16,0,5,13,163,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017146494612848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142792212264118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345596443998725,0.0,0.1539587823623506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530015464040274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09759982264387483,0.1352578001308927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528635122995716,0.24814492521371065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726629805640996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680691014341675,0.0,0.0,0.11523832643060306,0.0,0.06180893214010497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773218754827245,0.1172651035949034,0.13894522588672434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12993690740057492,0.0,0.0,0.08193584343454582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13799567775101734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06718068454759807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590281786146908,0.059720980496859165,0.0,0.0,0.21635961032782505,0.20530400187034964,0.0,0.13344094417627456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08159709343237505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231905943790206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906404599736073,0.18856022969050493,0.0,0.13000513117271184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283394613186572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228863849281674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831098033114804,0.12568453343641248,0.0,0.13124153165456584,0.0,0.0,0.11627957823947002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948211614943729,0.0,0.1275244552377185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941074130958872,0.0,0.0,0.0865231023917141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277932679444513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191033060997676,0.0,0.0,0.11254347086579032,0.2795874219660565,0.0,0.0,0.07832736255176154,0.12010156914197467,0.0,0.07127995186361627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980546892636828,0.0,0.2198194245686175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325655996100239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thr0w4w4y_acc01,2020/01/15,"I don't wanna be anxious for working Today I went to apply for a job in a electronic shop and when they asked for my signature and name in a paper, I started shaking for no reason and feeling very anxious. For context, I'm a 24F, studying college from home and never worked outside. I know this whole situation might be normal due my situation, but I don't wanna be scared or anxious about working.

(sorry if this looks confusing, english is not my first language)

Please help.",5.769706959706959,6.73699653846154,6.66346153846154,74.3023717948718,67.13186813186813,8.264468864468865,36.04578754578755,8.344100000000001,3.1682293040293037,379,19,63,5,6,126,63,91,0.059000000000000004,0.767,0.175,0.8559,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,4,2,3,0,3,4,0,7,0,0,1,1,18,14,8,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,3,1,1,2,5,3,0,1,1,2,9,0,12,9,1,10,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,4,6,47,11,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5498311382674883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516659004362628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202984976122965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379952571368379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087413209430674,0.0,0.16273286795897368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099116145450254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915898187343563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362348114236114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17210351343951008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251240458045293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15895383732469742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780830520950348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16680248368843034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242347617598552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647132470100049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816064957680551,0.11482931098016125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537778591127194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13385916712006773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503915620840994,0.0,0.1811272854778477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35432254072342895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ferrisbueller3005,2020/01/15,"very lost college student - advice please? Hi all, I’m a sophomore in college feeling very lost and on the verge of mental breakdown. I applied to transfer to 1 school in the fall (should have applied to more) and then turned it down when I got in because I didn’t feel ready emotionally/mentally (panic attacks before I was supposed to leave) and wasn’t 100% sure about going because it’s across the country in a state I have never visited, doesn’t have a traditional campus, and I’ve heard from many people that it is difficult socially. Now I’m back at my original school feeling miserable as ever. I’m so scared that my mental health is just going to deteriorate throughout the semester. What should I do?

1) call the school I got into and ask if there’s any way they can re-enroll me 
2) ask the school I got into to defer to fall and then go home for a semester 
3) ride it out where i am right now and then reapply to transfer to more schools in the Spring
4) go home and do CC for a semester while also reapplying to transfer schools (this would save a TON of money which is great especially because if i had to take an extra semester at a new school it would be fine, and I could go back to the old school if I didn’t get in anywhere).

I’m super lost right now, any advice will help!",6.97523076923077,5.696480523076925,7.459230769230771,77.20576923076926,64.92307692307692,10.307692307692307,34.615384615384606,9.265573868473778,2.915269230769231,1016,38,204,15,13,336,141,260,0.086,0.8029999999999999,0.111,0.6632,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,4,13,13,1,3,16,0,23,1,0,1,4,30,47,20,0,8,4,0,3,0,0,5,1,1,2,0,10,12,0,0,3,0,1,9,5,8,0,0,12,4,16,5,33,28,5,45,0,4,0,0,9,18,0,3,16,132,26,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263774127393285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654875324908867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318107967729513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559367006072033,0.09467156222919104,0.0,0.12797775805353948,0.0,0.15218527182114566,0.0,0.07081169569995507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497405072435556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644215124790406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527470863802682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623132828967354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04347754480699654,0.0,0.23647122155194064,0.0,0.19966915604762409,0.0917472408931134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845597686888536,0.0,0.0,0.05577872535657047,0.0,0.16694724451844778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811498392452663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725241651711007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436916473235964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677267003632975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641822237021366,0.0803716763998827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732243763711799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763743714310258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057692318465801175,0.0,0.0,0.09134748012367283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14213404360214932,0.0,0.0,0.08331492012887261,0.6737618765475203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482944091955191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843121258164104,0.0,0.06256896705555835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051640150322013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732578663742154,0.0,0.06605392847850823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823020204787092,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Robot_Penguins,2020/01/15,"Seems normal to berate myself for work mistakes... for days. I just dont understand accepting one's mistakes. For me, I beat myself up over it for days. The smallest mistake and I'm assuming I'm going to get fired. This time, instead of checking, I went with a guess on project allocation today and it messed some things up and man... I just feel like I deserve to die over this. I know if someone else did it, it wouldn't be the same. I'd be logical about it. But I cant get over my own mistakes. I have this weird standard for myself when it comes to my career and I don't know how it developed. I just cant stop hating myself for making mistakes.",1.6046327356853638,3.6771656691729326,3.305263157894739,89.58761133603242,80.2781954887218,5.8968189705031815,23.764603817235397,7.010146845296331,0.8822763447079232,506,18,105,6,13,168,79,133,0.18,0.7659999999999999,0.054000000000000006,-0.9392,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,7,10,1,0,3,0,9,0,0,2,0,33,24,8,1,8,5,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,11,6,0,1,8,0,1,3,5,8,0,1,2,2,17,2,19,19,3,15,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,5,7,75,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19440671120054745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910949123875354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23422427510095356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26449987008760634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18852995364675507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411256955139515,0.16122863550203026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358210638959817,0.0,0.12826137100130633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24861627856480376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22281614469481667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480599574369253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025776218197224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15064576715849684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22112232156919875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15292926300300572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054541620734888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912212506248038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18868186018992245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149934366393714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13159810698912355,0.0,0.2139219649254882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23494491691856445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20921125222365028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16430057956390126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amita0226,2020/01/15,"Poll: What age did you start seeing a therapist? At what age did you start seeing a therapist?  And why?  Curious to see how we can all support each other and know that we are not alone:)

I saw my first therapist in college when i was 19 because of relationship issues.",1.8339102564102556,4.417757134615388,3.674615384615386,84.15371794871797,83.42307692307692,7.3128205128205135,24.051282051282055,8.344100000000001,1.9146435897435896,209,8,40,5,6,70,40,52,0.0,0.893,0.107,0.6747,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,2,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,1,1,9,13,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,4,7,1,4,9,2,8,0,0,4,0,5,2,0,0,6,30,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20056564124270207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11804879823684555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16472076174186234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021229516995285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642637808745883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20791036832543566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4629480348167869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741365459566371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21975462104047172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6745366156700009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17474130738671226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dooziedance,2020/01/15,Anyone else silently suffering today? Me too. My heart goes out to you! I hope you have a wonderful day today. Stay strong!,0.5291304347826085,2.309165391304348,2.1083478260869555,88.13991304347826,112.47826086956522,5.318260869565218,17.643478260869568,6.742157984588678,0.851511304347826,96,3,17,2,5,31,21,23,0.10099999999999999,0.556,0.34299999999999997,0.8118,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,2,3,0,5,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,3,10,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211311256156064,0.30964838938382183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948995240803109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524564784678733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3581186059734473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001612954440057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221141213940561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5729167687932138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3277322986428243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Okwellthatsucks546y,2020/01/15,What do you do when you realize you are seriously fucked? Like I'm just completely fucked for life. I am mentally disabled and I thought I was fine but my brain can't do shit because severe brain damage. I mean I can type sentences but I'm worthless. I don't think anyone could help me I'm so fucked but is there some place I can reach out to?,0.3633333333333333,2.7135564444444458,1.9522222222222247,95.315,88.72222222222223,5.422222222222223,20.5,6.937597516519254,0.3884333333333334,272,9,61,4,9,88,49,72,0.292,0.5539999999999999,0.154,-0.9405,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,3,0,0,4,9,4,0,0,0,12,7,3,0,0,12,21,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,12,2,3,18,1,3,0,2,0,3,4,2,4,1,2,37,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454021083509633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12676319834954536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4642775823464073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21802956918638544,0.0,0.0,0.16602959333621178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5767338513248718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938319145040895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468798541944746,0.1015929111030576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265163834591724,0.0,0.0,0.2095627198240469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172614479194252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349221012027794,0.21345568027180906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324471089480142,0.0,0.1650875199964597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LiangProton,2020/01/15,"I seem to have an absence of a 'myself' when socializing I don't quite know how to explain it properly. But whenever I'm in a social situation, whether it's a classroom, among family or just with one other person, I sort of just acting out my behaviour. Acting the best way I know how and appropriately conducting myself. It's never really 'me' it's more like I'm acting out in a play or something. 

The thing is I sort of have to act in a situation among people because I'll be doing nothing if I don't. If I'm not acting, I'm just standing around doing nothing and ignoring people. I don't quite know how to explain it as much but it's exhausting. Like saying things, having conversations with people just because it's socially necessary. Even when I'm among people I like, it's much the same really. I behave in the best way I know what's socially acceptable.

Sometimes when I don't know how to behave, I do nothing because I have nothing to really do. I can't really be 'myself' because there isn't a 'myself' to be. I certainly have set beliefs, likes and dislikes but not a set 'me'. Unless standing aimlessly is 'me'.  People say to be yourself and you'll make friends and stuff, but I don't feel like I have a 'myself' I either act appropriately or I do nothing.

​

It's been sort of like this forever. And I really only began thinking about it when the idea of having a job came up. People with jobs have to act social among their pairs and act friendly when doing costumer service. Things I don't like doing but I'm very capable of acting them just fine. But of course, when I'm thinking about how to behave in the workplace, I'm realizing I'm acting everywhere else. Even among family, I'm not really being a 'me' I'm mostly just behaving in a way that's most appropriate.

Of course, I don't really like acting, it's exhausting and frustrating especially when there are much better things to do. So I usually try to limit as many social interactions as possible, not feeding into the conversation while remaining appropriate. So I'm essentially dreading just being among people because I have to put in the effort.

​

Personally, I really hope I'm just talking about nothing and this is a none issue. Something to completely forget about. I heard that people act a little differently in different environments so maybe I'm just describing that.",4.293615681615684,6.230116617582418,6.2446272646272645,72.19456192456192,71.83516483516482,9.314523314523314,29.000594000594,9.77003265185595,3.166932283932283,1891,76,321,50,37,657,167,455,0.049,0.799,0.152,0.9928,4,0,2,0,0,0,51.0,0,1,2,7,33,23,1,1,22,0,38,3,0,6,2,77,68,41,0,3,27,0,1,8,2,1,2,3,0,2,23,17,1,2,15,1,0,14,15,5,0,1,4,4,39,18,52,57,11,52,1,0,0,0,22,20,0,12,19,240,62,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552104291133216,0.15198243115107918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0556725919890203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906146787104138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13126075532228199,0.05531028872686911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152747099239187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06557050756203463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067900346636865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05224295584945266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261227986025363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791160817333028,0.0,0.03162138332729465,0.044677571511963485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663429806386382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062114917393935126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059844059081223,0.0,0.06527402578195975,0.12411977453274067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17184783046035415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24442551606520785,0.06268008307683398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0417449854006461,0.06340430070299416,0.0628284058004203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379191484156265,0.0,0.048233605539492616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36004470467335165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04237775791387023,0.0475634054867132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34685099655661883,0.10921254546228808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050284835404508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06286854260337113,0.0,0.13303494816106928,0.0,0.0,0.3205105077271776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946637221603524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05693277121577602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14059196038777172,0.0,0.38250121813524696,0.0,0.09629050301984599,0.061852251216703825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159170781238107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05026613883165823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619140528722615,0.08014438918475154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04245958826984776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887740657658396,0.05160087514114455,0.0,0.14892063316560486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15198243115107918,0.0
mentalhealth,sam9876,2020/01/15,"I can´t eat well, besides at home since a few month. What´s going on? So this summer something embarassing happened to me. I went out to eat with my gf and due a physical sickness I had to vomit. ""Luckily"" I barfed in a potted plant and not on the floor. Nobody from the staff saw me and we got away because we already paid. I know it´s a shitty thing to do, but I just wanted to leave.

​

Now ever since that day I have troubles eating in restaurants or even when I get invited by people I know. My gf´s mom invited us for dinner once and I couldn´t eat one bite. I am scared that this will happen again even if I know for a fact that nothing is wrong anymore, but I get this intense feeling in my stomach. It feels like if I eat one more bite I have to throw up. I get cold hands and become very nervous. I tried bringing myself to eat a bit even with the intense feeling and it worked a little but it was still very hard and I couldn´t finish most of my food. 

​

In addition I get this feeling even thinking about a situation where I have to eat out again and then I get angry at myself that I am scared of eating anywhere besides home. I think to myself that this is so ridiculous because in my job I have to speak infront of people and I am also in a band where we play in front of people and I can deal with that quite fine...but eating food is where my mind is like ""no can´t do that anymore."" It don´t get it. 

One more thing I am quite skinny and never had a big appetite but I never experienced something like this.

I just wanna enjoy eating out again. Is there anything I can do to deal with this? Has similiar things happen to you? Pls help.",2.3326528599605543,4.205313606508882,3.536544378698228,89.77448126232744,77.1360946745562,5.5717554240631175,23.39684418145957,6.2581,0.5238754240631165,1301,41,266,9,30,422,162,338,0.094,0.8009999999999999,0.105,-0.2903,1,0,2,0,0,0,39.0,4,1,0,3,22,12,1,3,13,0,23,18,3,0,4,49,48,23,0,4,10,1,6,3,1,1,2,1,2,0,22,22,14,0,9,2,1,5,4,6,1,3,7,10,46,6,42,40,5,42,0,0,1,0,12,22,0,4,18,197,68,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246433285184868,0.052513271387191744,0.0,0.14229869529513695,0.15958334732364374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13024653747037102,0.0,0.0,0.0540377234641106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061695597585918624,0.0,0.0,0.08005906537286689,0.07252320706623623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169053074633301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042349294773749664,0.1353980277833337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6719296093262369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734877386851605,0.059398876918173076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281130352119402,0.04691197764222613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588077651489808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058474124513998,0.0,0.03731963959155871,0.0,0.052519293837279137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742053273959062,0.0,0.05882405621831496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044014698987938285,0.0,0.13173719312106213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516361443547701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826535070191738,0.0,0.0,0.06953107065413082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624362927075884,0.06581482735976231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06630418682653938,0.076907511013006,0.05241416925364696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129171072186552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300853188836736,0.0,0.0,0.06993240645925594,0.13349143862379434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657411575591305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13968826645144838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314867310873207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863959078119237,0.07381160926150385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110616517319304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052441147068192986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308772034600767,0.08415255499234503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04458306904796417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898840593716341,0.0,0.0,0.10836305640705987,0.03873165190630565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904183931308754,0.0608732658206639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04780580751742128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179572906030683,0.15958334732364374,0.0
mentalhealth,gurilla783,2020/01/15,Does pornography damage your brain and memory ? Does it change your personality or make you dumber ?,6.414375,10.267531687500004,6.705000000000003,61.24000000000001,75.875,10.7,20.5,10.125756701596842,3.46385,81,2,11,3,2,26,14,16,0.302,0.698,0.0,-0.7236,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4333344802124717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4106403360665831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6793935114001116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591115027959328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3389416298426183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flowerhead_,2020/01/15,"I swear on my life that I'm a famous person and everyone in my community is trying to kill me I know reading the title of this I already sound crazy and I swear on my life what I'm about to tell you really happened.

Since February 2019 I've been having some flashbacks of what happened to me when I was in grade 5, my home teacher and music teacher were physically and sexually assaulting me and my mother because my homeroom teacher was saying some pretty rude things about me and I told my mother who went and told the principal and I believe that my teacher was almost fired because that.  I also remember getting into verbal fights with some of my neighbors in my building and I remember one of them slapping me across the face and the other one was physically assaulting me like he was throwing me on the ground for no reason he just wanted to beat me. So since I've been having these flashbacks I've talked to my mom who lies to me and says no these are false memories but she's a liar herself. I have talked to a psychiatrist but she doesn't believe me and I've been diagnosed with symptoms of psychosis which I think i have been misdiagnosed. So much stuff has happened to me when I was a toddler and growing up but its too much for me to type it out cause that would be a whole book itself. it's like I'm screaming for help and telling people that I've been abused and no one believes me I feel like they think I'm crazy. I don't know what to do and these flashbacks are causing me so much stress and I feel like at war with my body.",5.818533901313457,5.6601712172523975,6.309238551650694,80.79997426340081,66.8594249201278,9.000283990060348,32.085374511892084,8.515128840125781,2.3472145544905927,1233,46,247,16,18,401,147,313,0.155,0.7859999999999999,0.06,-0.9790000000000001,0,0,0,0,2,1,9.0,0,1,2,1,10,13,7,1,10,0,25,6,2,3,0,43,43,26,2,2,4,3,3,4,1,1,4,4,2,1,22,22,0,0,9,2,0,3,5,9,0,3,15,7,48,4,34,26,7,17,0,0,0,0,25,12,0,4,6,180,70,4,0.0,0.12583194539570122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634591286017,0.0,0.11719649355792612,0.08492966166427124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947944692194066,0.0,0.0,0.35895969185227783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796642579393235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21819731623728847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779274450212308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014805151491858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739779464584072,0.1517413897062179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055486135955551866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817421029963968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118492896277825,0.0,0.10652921580411646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749672340336666,0.0,0.11673162944888385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15002715719300924,0.20753963472176712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438244118550447,0.0,0.0,0.23421196071591874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21589557111768373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362706059403118,0.09273144701566606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804556422766892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623069053016568,0.0,0.06803568912220351,0.1091932933056106,0.0,0.0,0.24061221478788786,0.0,0.0,0.16891210777935378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17570270228188434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216539757926969,0.0,0.12157582504213844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103844908548828,0.0,0.17072221034751342,0.18565037203390464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055585706118851,0.1360998436183323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029610302983716,0.0,0.07210415329641734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06264066216417784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845027235932606,0.0,0.11857068534887473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544281874703347,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,protruding_skull,2020/01/15,"Guilty Hi. I was wondering,sometimes I find myself feeling guilty or belittling myself for feeling or thinking negatively. I find it hard to think that my emotions are much of a hindrance compared to other people situations so when Im in a funk reminding myself of that is one of the only things that gets me out of it but I'm not sure if it's necessarily a good way of dealing with it?

What am I even supposed to feel lol",5.799176470588236,5.839822329411768,7.143529411764708,74.1258823529412,66.88235294117646,9.623529411764707,34.64705882352941,9.3871,3.1599882352941178,338,15,64,6,5,116,61,85,0.11,0.7709999999999999,0.11900000000000001,0.4131,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,1,4,0,0,0,1,15,11,6,0,1,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,9,2,12,10,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,3,1,50,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349473478096861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563485930808643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505209667706681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34568816140421643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41657956438721694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906452011825645,0.0,0.0,0.1911455688798382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041470798676162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24616320251378784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16752734251150367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544259788389647,0.17332265345723366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579920909318422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561609222448337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22539168912489346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21478615523899794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15140177123258736,0.2920488567012038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18089060297980775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cikokiko,2020/01/15,"Hey there I would really appreciate your help! So. I am doing an internship on a bandaid support platform called 7cups and one of my requirements is to get a number of referral clicks. I would really appreciate it if you could take 5 seconds to click my link and potentially check it out \^\^ there are some really nice listeners there willing to hear you out.

[https://www.7cups.com/15535582](https://www.7cups.com/15535582)",7.808319327731095,11.590322352941186,6.072100840336138,68.83088235294122,68.11764705882354,10.356302521008402,28.831932773109244,10.290406445055957,3.9064344537815128,352,13,51,11,7,103,51,68,0.0,0.774,0.226,0.9364,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,3,0,1,4,2,0,0,3,0,8,1,0,0,0,11,13,4,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,8,2,8,9,1,4,0,0,2,0,8,4,0,2,0,39,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985626718731449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23344945936404626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527615999638425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295445492513658,0.0,0.19598271630191627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981308922254294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5619371693106953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318004744338052,0.0,0.0,0.21984073750995067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.415410642644538,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway-mayb2morro,2020/01/15,"So last night I [M35] came close to killing myself again. Throwaway account for obvious reasons.

I've spent many years dealing with mental illness, depression, anxiety, anger issues and various other things that go hand in hand with this. I feel I've done ok with my life and have the support of friends and family although I appear as an extrovert I'm not very good at networking or maintaining friends due to a short fuse.

I've have various careers and jobs, dropped out of college and fell from one job or girl to another. I ended up meeting someone, bought a house, had a son and lost it all and got divorced. 

This has really shaken me to my core as it wasnt a great divorce and I didnt have a great lawyer. I lost the house, $28k in owed money, most of my access to my son, another $20k in lawyers fees and still not fully divorced yet. After all this I have the $15k of debt left by my ex wife so I'm maxed out on loans and credit cards. All my money every month goes to paying all this off. I have a well paid job but it's not enough to cover it all so month to month I get hand outs from my family. 

Yesterday after a therapy session which I need to pay $120 for excess I got 2 emails from lawyers saying in total I owe them $2 in fees with the divorce.

Well that just broke me, I couldn't really focus or concentrate after that I fell into a black pit and went numb. I cant do anything right, I cant take my son to do anything, I can barely afford the gas for my car to collect him from school at nights, I cant get groceries from the stops so my partner pays for all the food, I hate my job and last night I just loaded my pockets with medication and kissed my partner goodbye and made an excuse I was going to the shops.

I drove around for a while just to find somewhere to park at the river or park to just to OD but I just sat there and let everything flood in and just cried and cried until my eyes and throat was sore. I wouldve screamed if I had the energy but all energy had left me.

I couldn't do it and sat numb for hours and must've fell asleep. I woke up an hour later and drove home and didnr say anything more about it.

I know eventually that this will get the better of me and I will die by suicide. I cant see a 5year or 10year plan or future and this will be how it ends for me and I've made my peace with myself and i can accept this. Once everyone else leaves or cant stand me then it will be my time.",3.74972933215652,3.995966213592237,4.83966460723742,88.16067372756693,71.33009708737866,8.028832009414534,25.50897322741983,7.898369717300924,1.158974110032362,1900,51,429,23,33,626,248,515,0.127,0.7879999999999999,0.085,-0.9678,8,0,0,0,4,2,42.0,0,0,1,4,19,23,3,0,24,1,33,14,6,4,9,82,66,48,4,4,20,5,4,0,4,4,6,3,1,3,22,39,1,1,5,1,17,11,12,10,2,1,24,10,57,13,66,33,13,64,0,4,3,1,22,23,0,10,28,276,79,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902375817086788,0.06530343212630546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107425596189916,0.07599229767854379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549775886934429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763398242566544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875372821800437,0.0,0.08800681299788085,0.07352411979698828,0.0,0.08859463393332663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735728501957593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131089303874337,0.0,0.1512148097383276,0.08820410917580948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192307835616663,0.08156921722686725,0.0767199006498228,0.0,0.16094767115981753,0.0,0.04316273931145563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802139535420842,0.0,0.1032228129086388,0.0,0.13190444493539188,0.0,0.1337979218035398,0.0,0.09702896257657001,0.07159949874985548,0.13654720817394705,0.18822881585119453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427954261002238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856273219756464,0.0,0.16813321926842256,0.1969978103803532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909811849388831,0.3388434602055521,0.0,0.09444291587054726,0.0,0.04691396976929209,0.13916654529074976,0.0,0.0903884352347081,0.18549705606373693,0.08729074865009813,0.06029530771013295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18637036711455665,0.0,0.0,0.16154747068308048,0.0,0.08654597030567725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599552023246879,0.08602710525320373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044108352594238,0.0,0.0,0.06329652381055675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403257511433746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091016048771576,0.05784503791336342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937307318612192,0.0877686859223028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290061929639666,0.0,0.13577018594601278,0.0,0.08639319760032818,0.06802427023715228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232886809907102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817201548622433,0.0713683512359272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337465509531856,0.0968703608393284,0.0,0.0,0.06418330656733766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09762148116172213,0.0,0.05671222719742033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04977659173027658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043446198755353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350545932006307,0.07913353258324035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054971790453102416
mentalhealth,mhdhaitham,2020/01/15,"School and IB related stress and anxeity  Hey, Im Mohammad doing the IB diploma from Lebanon and recently ive been  noticing my friends and I's mental health going down the drain ever  since we started dp2, im in a class made up of 20 individuals, and from  what i know, a close friend of mine is seeing 2 psychiatrists, a super  close friend of mine hasnt been the same for 3 months and he never goes  out with us anymore, a friend has dropped out, a female friend is also  seeing help at 2 psychiatrists, i have been feeling like crying whenever  any minor missconviencince happens with me, but here is the thing, i  asked other ib students from other ib schools in lebanon if they were  going through the same thing and they all said no, so the question is,  is the problem the school and all the weights its making us carry or is  it the system as a whole? Thank you! <3",5.303508021390375,6.011653094117648,5.707860962566844,81.66628342245991,68.05882352941177,8.299465240641712,30.16042780748663,8.296473431620573,2.063235294117648,686,25,134,9,11,220,107,170,0.06,0.815,0.125,0.7901,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,3,1,2,1,4,10,0,1,16,0,15,2,0,2,4,30,28,14,0,2,3,0,2,1,5,0,1,1,0,0,7,15,1,0,3,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,6,5,15,8,18,22,5,18,0,0,2,0,17,9,0,3,6,92,22,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007620032115018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510101128381509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410747065169743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169910970038558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13746286920146258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131983163167455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632756742486143,0.08940163787110432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4834229026481745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224243239924658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066286534782806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302034416181674,0.0,0.0,0.08388020240663195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703501771825755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877489974421537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06113817496735498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841260881138267,0.08353341377840443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611393936965118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09988733825434508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651740660310346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424752642754962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974421831144427,0.0,0.0,0.14018794363209405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356286004301888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903892301146735,0.0,0.0,0.3799518693108295,0.1994443185575748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035189501874966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857631821736735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14335000767365602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11521415683367715,0.0,0.0,0.16627788093629933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30106140131060005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238952902668965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971683657585984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chriswiss,2020/01/15,"Early signs of OCD? While I've turned a new leaf as of late, I still obsess over certain things in my head over and over again. It's exhausting. I also obsess over my body image a little too often.

I hate to the self-diagnosis master, but if you have any experience, what are telltale signs of clinically diagnoseable OCD?",4.141774193548386,5.996383177419357,5.4234193548387095,78.26512903225809,72.06451612903227,8.185806451612903,23.690322580645162,8.841846274778883,1.7442477419354838,255,7,47,5,5,85,49,62,0.127,0.847,0.027000000000000003,-0.5829,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,5,5,1,2,3,0,2,5,2,0,1,7,4,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,1,10,4,0,12,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,2,6,33,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22255825406104507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18925511189849206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30913112389760394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.282470983007968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722330579061023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747659106887787,0.2856184568157929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139371238694828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789320238786425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687861019509354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903300012888085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222525815693553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18489168629203104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027129930900861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chimshir,2020/01/15,"I seem to relapse while I'm happy (?) I was trying to figure out what triggers me to self-harm when I realised I was always doing something else (like dancing in my room, as cliché as it sounds), but there was this emotion in me almost like anger... I could even feel my blood pounding in my ears, it felt very intense yet I've never stopped to think about it because after that I go into a huge depressive episode for 2 weeks  (rinse and repeat). But before that (like a week or even two if I'm lucky) I would be smiling and having a good time, going out with friends, clubbing, partying and stuff like that.

I don't know what to do now, honestly, that's why I'm posting this here... Can I just not handle so much happiness or something??",7.33326530612245,5.5897001496598655,7.209523809523812,80.77714285714288,64.51020408163265,9.48843537414966,34.605442176870746,7.447530270364453,2.3469482993197266,570,20,116,4,7,182,101,147,0.021,0.726,0.253,0.9888,0,0,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,0,10,12,1,0,3,0,11,2,2,1,1,27,21,13,0,3,7,0,2,4,1,1,0,2,1,0,12,7,0,1,6,2,0,3,3,2,0,1,4,4,14,10,17,14,1,23,0,1,0,0,1,8,0,6,15,79,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16832316268785474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13986875630924453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246933531724836,0.0,0.14303672039149545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13421041985105198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478023648380758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14042205451120118,0.18908458867475372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220507220008816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499403491066974,0.0,0.1613978498734589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298700126145113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910648666914032,0.14099036329505008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578811473789909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238078138638982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284914930899406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235693875666012,0.0,0.12964545891806328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16098883257506752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530276488599411,0.17536005922040473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588159502867305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14053519848897586,0.0,0.0,0.19242890325635145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770868152348248,0.0,0.0,0.09801772183014408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412567534909468,0.0,0.1642046839254625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869622773213358,0.0,0.0,0.2696718223036485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167986364807098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941007897768825,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GeoffwithoutaJ,2020/01/15,"I attempted suicide and the bills from it have made my life worse than it was before About six weeks ago I overdosed on lithium. I took my entire months supply at once along with some other meds I had lying around. I texted my friend goodbye thinking she was in class and wouldn’t get it until after i was gone. She texted one of my other friends and they came over and brought me to hospital while I was half unconscious. I spent a night in the ER and then a day in hospital before being transferred to inpatient psychiatric care for a week. I started to kind of get my life together and was doing a little better after I got out. That was until the bills started coming in. I had pretty good insurance through my college, but apparently not good enough. The pre insurance bills were somewhere in the $30,000 range and after insurance I’ve been left with about $7,000 to pay. I don’t really know what I’m going to do with this. I’m not suicidal anymore, but I’m kind of fucked.",3.9737800687285225,5.552157752577326,4.721010309278352,84.25096563573884,71.98969072164948,7.853745704467355,26.335395189003435,8.447377352677275,1.7771440549828177,780,26,151,13,15,251,116,194,0.078,0.8140000000000001,0.10800000000000001,0.5717,1,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,1,2,3,9,1,0,9,0,16,3,0,1,0,24,36,13,2,1,4,0,0,0,2,1,2,1,0,0,8,15,0,0,2,0,5,6,4,1,1,3,17,1,22,8,33,17,2,33,0,0,0,1,5,12,1,1,15,106,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002544042518238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454699099557828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057877906972412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496324962370988,0.0,0.0,0.129729005133673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16776603169426102,0.14955287733681047,0.0,0.0,0.12635423289919548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459826291089987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15156252984783494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22665351489163166,0.1356058730527158,0.15327140429483804,0.0,0.08336320821121705,0.24606112499214866,0.11731562456603913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054951012042777,0.08061302370013426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593712773647976,0.0,0.20721278089859585,0.0,0.1470146876182096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879479978899706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629315091932408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708080122236915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765185912245714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15621238104595864,0.0993960527147156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922912788762985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396874943932516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20764566335344875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208943230004712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939884071779664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16296997362021526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353201680736721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14948229150905007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JolieKrys88,2020/01/15,"The internal struggle of trying to appear like a normal young adult while struggling “quiet” borderline personality disorder. Most people on the outside looking in would think I’m a normal/healthy late 20s/female. I can be very charismatic, intelligent, witty and funny. I am highly insightful and a deep thinker so I naturally attract people when I first initially meet them. I’ve modeled for a lingerie brand and my social media would give you the impression life is great. But it’s so far from that. 

I had a very traumatic childhood. My mom had a breakdown mentality right after I was born due to sudden flashbacks of her being raped by her father. So she took it out on me. There was no bonding or little. My dad avoids emotion and doesn’t like to get involved. After they divorced, my dad remarried and started a new family. I hardly hear from him although he supported me very well financially until 18. I was mercilessly bullied in middle school and early high school and with little stable or emotional support at home. I still tried to carry on and pretend I was normal. 

I was misdiagnosed with just general anxiety. Possible bipolar II in my early 20s but I personally didn’t feel like it fit. Finally being diagnosed with complex trauma as my therapist likes to call it but admitted it isn’t recognized in the DSM. She said If it’s a label in the DSM, it would be borderline personality disorder albeit “quiet” (acting inward) or higher functioning. 

I am highly insightful into my behavior and disorder but to me it actually makes it worse. My intellectual brain is watching me suffer & choosing thoughts/behaviors that continue to feed the cycle. Jordan Peterson said that borderlines can often be quite intelligent and can tell you exactly why they do what they do & what they need to do to fix it/change yet they can’t seem to implement or the implementation doesn’t last long. This hit home. My overwhelming fear of people, intense self hatred, need to belong & feel safe/loved overrides every once of logic. Yes, I practice DBT and yes outwardly it’s controlled. Inward is a very different story. 

I go between being the life of the party to self induced periods of isolation (except work.) The isolation is because I know my thoughts are not quite normal & isolation feels safer at times. I obsess about improving my appearance as a way to be “worthy” but nothing will ever satisfy me. I only seem to be attracted to damaged narcissistic playboys who feed into that cycle of unworthiness. I get emotionally exhausted from just performing adult responsibilities and daily life. Sometimes that’s why I sleep all weekend. I get bored so easily. People so happy their with the 9-5 white picket fence life seem absolutely foreign to me. I frequently overuse sleeping pills to sedate myself when I’m feeling sad and lonely. I socially binge drink with friends as a way to seem fun & comfortable. I don’t feel like a woman in her late 20s but rather a young girl. Intellectually I like to talk about globally politics & economics yet I could never finish my degree. I ghost friends after an ordinary conflict. I flee. I’m terrified of conflict or somebody getting to close to see the “real” me. Those who have jokingly say “you’re like an alien from another planet.” Or “you gave so much wasted potential” So I avoid people getting to close. I just want them to see the mask I wear. 

I have been through years of therapy on and off. I know all the tools yet I do think I’m condemned to a life on the outside looking in. Changing ones “personality” and that intense self hatred for a sustained period of time feels like an impossibility. 

Sorry for the venting. I just wanted to say living with a “quiet” distorted personality just really sucks.",4.972171412136902,7.521309947368422,6.2760972102387145,70.03789905090598,71.60233918128654,9.339047071229988,31.24235452018023,9.792855660901497,3.6939409740197484,3020,137,471,83,61,1014,352,684,0.159,0.69,0.151,-0.8991,1,7,1,0,1,0,78.0,0,3,8,6,25,37,2,7,35,2,43,17,4,3,5,99,91,43,1,13,21,4,7,8,2,4,9,8,2,12,22,26,3,6,23,4,0,6,9,16,1,2,14,21,72,21,79,63,4,78,0,5,6,1,54,32,1,15,46,313,94,3,0.0,0.0,0.05375054724484405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580776908054987,0.0,0.0,0.057756625897763064,0.0421363727104769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03357651452496293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061487968078413224,0.05624327007959835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653556792153112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061777377797927024,0.043977235702549605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0559054697483088,0.0,0.057547318596882176,0.18938080955436432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05395784504673802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858741862166399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049823395872054616,0.0464076318414434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05192492062099082,0.061980788963519926,0.16710190061511626,0.11804839524640108,0.0,0.06033791091088301,0.0,0.04685137952943882,0.0,0.0,0.08510999610581557,0.0,0.14388623786513566,0.052838160570167866,0.03130347362853509,0.0,0.0,0.06072636063153245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058634134328957664,0.04934123996658295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207963966332395,0.0,0.0,0.17458647256500484,0.11050031018239438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060541519830185186,0.044897896100306006,0.12426623219462772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19452465786584905,0.21527609903808115,0.11041010766293204,0.048637022487412,0.048744440933139774,0.092507365652428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036766609951864725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05550811116851315,0.0,0.0,0.06450952552544073,0.0,0.0,0.04049044842171788,0.08168287122798379,0.04248141769418799,0.0531970156062366,0.0,0.0,0.2158684788064949,0.0528511512417272,0.0,0.0,0.058658852693541874,0.037323920008598216,0.04189114358835782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19092914962451105,0.24047050336254835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062094900765937835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716961934615686,0.0,0.06269357983054089,0.035285929285822915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04703838015062285,0.10478819082057328,0.08760432601654139,0.0,0.11148865703402824,0.08778393143340625,0.2005725931083249,0.1723826808464085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024040252430628,0.1122951092873388,0.0,0.0,0.054475946591038986,0.06165802386819294,0.03898620678318458,0.0,0.04398729682991417,0.0,0.0,0.11516403438761602,0.0,0.0,0.12500922221146518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04427155746906203,0.04814271732964045,0.0,0.06298926382342715,0.06395261623988875,0.0,0.07058662181112177,0.0,0.0437277031916347,0.06423567500548877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611963764462825,0.07479198306822747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817884693245068,0.06497572095057849,0.08744055173470455,0.0,0.0,0.04952391502557511,0.0,0.09940302880185822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040099203831832034,0.0,0.05613165652562915,0.1173826561519552,0.0,0.0,0.035469986426044285
mentalhealth,erinarmi,2020/01/15,"Why am i so careless? I am constantly losing things, or just getting in trouble for stepping out of bounds. I just got yelled at an airport. Why am i so careless? I think it is because i am spoiled, never had to suffer consequences, naieve, too trusting, & just a general space cadet. How can i be less careless?",2.7239999999999998,5.15186206666667,3.6500000000000017,86.70500000000001,78.33333333333334,6.0,31.66666666666667,7.1686216300943375,2.1221666666666668,244,13,45,3,6,78,45,60,0.235,0.6809999999999999,0.084,-0.8754,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,1,1,10,11,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,2,1,7,1,6,8,1,7,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,1,2,35,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500396054502736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969367575557364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3491173101092485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878755608171342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25838371680357136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614258724850348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24916679933661184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21462930289736848,0.20700630519526333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5830298487028276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drivethruway,2020/01/15,"I was feeling detatched from my existance This is an anecdote of something that happened during all my life. Already solved, but I never quite understood why or what was it.
I never had trouble reading people, they seemed simple, kids and adults. They all functioned the same, talked the same, found funny the same things.   Doesn't matter if they thought they were different, all fell by the same tricks. Been trough so many moves from city to city. It always been the same.
Everyone loved me, but I loved nobody, I just couldn't, nor my family, nor my friends and couples. They just seemed like sand in the desert, and I was alone. 

The only thing I could ever loved was ""Shaco"", my dog, there was no cheat or trick for his true love. I gotta say, he is and was a true companion.
I wasn't sad or happy. I just wasn't. The only moment I truly felt alive was playing skyrim with shaco sleeping besides me, the days I skipped school.

Im not a 10/10 but i could get any girl I wanted, but that got old, what's the point?. I just didn't see the point in anything. During a time I couldn't relate myself in the mirror, get mad with people and react weird at everything, i really thought that all existance revolved around me, because people was so simple, and life so structured. I couldn't understand why anyone was like me.

Once someone knew how I was, thought I was a bad person. How could someone who has 10y long friendship with someone don't care for them. A year long relasionship where 1 never loved. A caring family that would have been exchanged for a dog.
The people that at least got where I was coming from, stayed with me(they are now my closest friends).

The girls were charmed when I told them my Oh so sad scarred past full of family dissapointments, the death of my grandpa, ""oh I have been trough so much, I'm a suffered little thing, but I'm gonna make it"" just a cool sasuke kinda past and a ""progression"" in my oh so hard to get trust. Was effective, but that made the relasionship very boring.

Yes, I went to the psychologist and was refreshing to take off the shell, and talk about my mind. It helped, but wasn't the thing that saved me.
It all ended when I decided to start over, didn't knew were to start. Months later I started dating my girlfriend, a big step because I really cared about her and im glad and proud that I still do. It was a slow process, but Im happy now, I think that I have trully good friends and I enjoy the sentiment of love, I have a nice job overall and everything is marching upfront and nice. I can't forget the tricks and shortcuts to people, but I only use it at job with clients and else. I take the longer and more ME way to people.

I always enjoyed little things, but all that; drinking, playing videogames, eating, making jokes, became so much better with people that you like and care. Life became to be.

But i never quite knew why all happened in the first place, I enjoy life so much now, but the feeling of being missunderstood is still there. I just wish that never happened.




If the wording seems weird , odd or repetitive, it's because english is not my first lenguage. If you read it all, thanks, i mean it. I needed to ventilate the whole story to the world",3.7678115015974414,5.4775042539936125,4.071074760383389,88.17448434504793,72.75399361022366,6.669341853035144,24.660575079872203,7.24861992348623,0.9848296230031952,2517,76,500,26,50,784,275,626,0.10400000000000001,0.674,0.222,0.9983,3,1,3,0,0,0,97.0,0,2,7,8,31,50,5,0,41,2,52,13,1,8,16,116,108,51,1,13,27,1,5,3,5,3,4,1,0,5,31,26,2,0,19,6,1,5,21,13,0,2,42,8,71,37,42,55,20,63,0,3,1,6,35,22,0,11,37,334,102,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06092089062160435,0.06491051513702945,0.0,0.09788768717932128,0.0,0.0,0.04000034571634039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041129060887697334,0.0,0.04840473000778172,0.05236322447327915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049113137788721416,0.1075703377832726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05202245774470353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23988801066766574,0.0,0.0,0.05066914476904937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14089151796208002,0.06508439687842356,0.0,0.03793472500566698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061455500345694435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05762225670584746,0.0,0.060188640895044526,0.049137457527251766,0.0,0.05209801037670097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053207026789335296,0.0,0.05620605459026786,0.10572917261399296,0.0,0.166353813955791,0.0,0.05948340230500824,0.0,0.056477453066421476,0.0,0.0,0.10006634682797133,0.0,0.06449426889070091,0.13633504190896512,0.0,0.09219474640829496,0.0,0.0,0.04933632407158445,0.09408916865571708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560458379434961,0.12523224888250406,0.052692126475335284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03942652436681442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19061055307048227,0.0,0.1167416745516804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618824953374572,0.0862110131807122,0.11790833309156296,0.0,0.10410959466596416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185298816257507,0.05565792013719465,0.07852704402909405,0.05963533422221391,0.0,0.06407339090892612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059392514265626264,0.0,0.04695041812762482,0.0625174901910437,0.12972076689145798,0.04361507923725085,0.22683218292747745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061722819825317465,0.06264252149154538,0.0,0.13420822648452665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230273708010056,0.28545387325732297,0.05136029084533945,0.061455500345694435,0.0,0.11120985053571802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512690005026142,0.11767397874010987,0.0,0.07536456927258207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046776877003662606,0.0,0.059530064718488374,0.04687277843771157,0.16064548312994692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058863551427129825,0.0,0.1495167091350842,0.045283334618833215,0.0,0.0,0.12490157158622793,0.06269543588259571,0.0939491674485564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845225086993833,0.09455629842297386,0.0,0.05415453982554768,0.0,0.0,0.19539053126673625,0.03769016756021207,0.0,0.14009208130622738,0.034299039848918404,0.0,0.0,0.05620605459026786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123480992288654,0.0,0.05080251996482992,0.0,0.048533544271951376,0.03469419200320796,0.046689428703034185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05452772263247045,0.1592306041317442,0.06567162576704555,0.0676413293772289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04178480157206285,0.0,0.0,0.03787884155536729
mentalhealth,thectheseatheopenc,2020/01/15,"Suspect friend has schizophrenia but don't know how to help To keep it brief I have a friend that I strongly suspect has schizophrenia for lots of reasons. Whatever it is it's really serious -severe wild all-consuming delusions, sudden abandonment of hygiene, nonsensical speech. 

The thing is my friend refuses help bc of severe paranoia and isolating and spiraling rapidly. Idk what to do as a friend, what should I be doing? I'm at a loss. I'm worried they're going to end up homeless or dead or something. Idk how much longer they're going to be able to keep a job. No family. 

Anyone here have experience with schizophrenia?? I know it can't be cured but what does help look like? I'm apologize for how ignorant and blunt I sound but Im so confused about what ""treatment"" even achieves. Can you still function independently? Does medication really stop the incoherent rambly speech stuff? And delusions? Is any return to normalcy even possible?",3.7911627906976766,6.8762923023255835,4.434930232558138,78.58390697674419,79.46511627906978,7.85860465116279,29.53023255813953,8.697196308434329,3.019606046511629,764,36,126,19,20,243,108,172,0.23600000000000002,0.606,0.158,-0.9372,2,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,3,9,11,0,1,6,0,16,1,0,5,0,28,26,14,1,1,5,0,0,1,4,1,1,3,0,0,11,5,0,6,5,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,0,4,7,6,17,22,2,10,0,2,1,0,10,2,0,4,6,77,18,2,0.14463233970034792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983549506504958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113029478788232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531374702638244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810132382171427,0.0,0.0,0.19105659262399435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14147818099703124,0.13634649792088938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44697034750583137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16439578341056815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.290832025746805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15622774591047706,0.0,0.14352528001647058,0.25711173796052045,0.0,0.0,0.1589723028737163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066005551592315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145473876272872,0.0,0.0,0.12296124311182327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570186615423905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063214112900514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630512316037744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18531036066952386,0.14870613369411886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32678675180528644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134504119812663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550357331390745,0.12091911219695943,0.0,0.0,0.16556942597279553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608729982782864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468811615865429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Brad6879,2020/01/15,I have a mix of OCD and ADHD symptoms and I'm not sure if I have either one or if I'm just dumb. I have ticks and unwanted thoughts and some other symptoms of OCD that have been around for about 2 years. I also struggle to concentrate and focus. Even if I do listen I won't actually comprehend what's being said sometimes. It's hurting me in school and it hurts me when trying to enjoy entertainment like video games or TV shows. I'm just not sure what to make of it. I feel like it's possible I have neither and I'm just actually dumb and incompetent. Any thoughts from anyone who might know something would be very appreciated.,2.5162335958005286,4.691461299212596,4.146948818897639,84.18110564304463,77.74015748031495,7.067979002624672,24.756561679790025,8.07648339933343,1.5035097112860898,503,18,101,9,12,168,78,127,0.177,0.713,0.11,-0.7924,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,8,11,2,1,1,0,12,2,0,1,2,31,23,15,0,5,11,0,1,2,0,3,2,2,0,0,9,9,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,5,0,1,4,3,10,6,11,14,3,4,0,2,0,0,4,2,2,7,4,68,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.3297565606454201,0.0,0.20305424505033745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511536048182232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489698629725265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181391075653177,0.0,0.0,0.1504081171560623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159492511324952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854300573802363,0.12070336893143115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3617452876469462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285469813222873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650883331582498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278053402034498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17923735166252508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449006682458232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19047434826031914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16071740276357294,0.0,0.0,0.1709941478690923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300718427308133,0.16710342225853128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766312058029975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3184811448331674,0.3512233530946537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682669804962849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471114418651325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940774439090725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002265699662468,0.0,0.0,0.1088031781026571
mentalhealth,weeliez23,2020/01/15,"my life really is empty. I am 20 years old and I have been crippled by my anxiety since I was 5-6. I watched my mom die and get resuscitated when I was 7 and have PTSD from that and the years after of her being sick, and a couple events that happened in between and after. She passed when I was 13 after being up and down in the hospital for about a month. I've been severely depressed since at least the age of 10 and hardly went to school, and I couldn't face it again for many years after my mom died. I tried to kill myself a few times but then I just became numb. After many attempts at the charter high school my mom would have wanted me to attend, would have wanted me to take advantage of the college preparatory aspects and build a future for myself, I had to go to a credit recovery program but I did end up getting all my credits and graduating high school! Ever since then, I have had nothing going on in my life. I go to therapy once a week, maybe go get some food or a Walmart trip here and there but I have agoraphobia and its just getting worse. I have had a boyfriend the past two years but we have broken up and he doesn't reply to me so its officially over this time. I love him and can't imagine my life without him but I know breakups happen and it is probably for the best if he doesn't feel the same, so it would be fine if I really had anything left to live for. He made me laugh and feel something, he cuddled me every night, gave me something to wake up to. I have no one really. My dad is really it. I have one friend. She lives very far from me and I don't have the energy to keep up with her. I would have gone to college if I didn't have a debt that I can't pay from concurrent classes I took for one week. But now I don't think I could ever face the workload and the people and the leaving my house. Like I said, I really haven't felt energy to do anything in at least 4 years and my agoraphobia really has paralyzed me. I just feel so stuck. I've never even heard a story about someone who missed out everything including their developmental years, absolutely incapable of everything and then ever be able to jump up and have a life. The only future I  even see being a possibility is me moping around my dad's house until he dies and I'm forced to live alone, on disability just sleeping with my dog all day, or getting married and taking care of kids all day. I don't want to even witness either. I don't even want to ever witness anything besides my bed. I really have put so much thought into it and I don't see any reason to live through this misery one more day. I literally wake up every morning, think about all this and just cry. I don't know. I could have written this a lot better but I 'm so bad with words nowadays. I guess I am posting this in hopes someone will read it and tell me they went through the same thing and how they got to the other side, but every particle of me doesn't believe it is possible or even worth it for me. I have no intention of actually killing myself because I just am so pussy, but if I could just press a button and just cease to exist trust me I would in the blink of an eye.",3.490812304414405,4.364734960183771,4.908632066049673,85.15413126706177,72.29249617151609,7.944723350422798,25.68110393501565,8.252601668568683,1.4355268260203735,2471,75,529,37,46,828,279,653,0.12300000000000001,0.79,0.087,-0.9620000000000001,2,1,2,0,0,2,47.0,1,0,3,4,34,19,2,0,31,0,65,15,6,4,9,107,111,59,5,18,26,5,6,1,1,6,6,2,1,1,21,37,1,1,11,1,5,13,18,6,0,5,24,12,85,13,79,72,15,82,0,2,4,2,28,28,0,11,41,383,106,12,0.05948599186571912,0.0,0.058049747103453425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616095475363967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04045251433026858,0.0,0.04550662095695538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685570831149186,0.052955144523140665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04966831847633529,0.03626210851232765,0.0,0.0,0.06702034238863327,0.06242687846902211,0.052610525727374784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06064993324063446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14248417225669352,0.06582011855777012,0.06534256881750553,0.1150906308001983,0.0,0.05123519762826613,0.0,0.18521120378909253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05268693241521291,0.0,0.0,0.1964496830077831,0.21523394111939576,0.15035854126997986,0.0,0.10692434762002084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023371452412876,0.0,0.057115880840329585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193069748706173,0.0,0.045958729754071684,0.0,0.15539487778033134,0.0,0.1352290401300347,0.0,0.04757638184379017,0.0,0.06553052655011249,0.0,0.10520653230270076,0.0,0.05328776447212261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570043282743446,0.0,0.05908301212717905,0.0,0.1372776957417794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05287388278647764,0.13162487283296687,0.0,0.06538389087262877,0.0,0.0,0.06298707628662703,0.06463170421576696,0.0,0.16806686105814886,0.029061850872079575,0.0,0.21010888260528893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0505728630450347,0.05368843014699536,0.0562870838144546,0.0,0.12061891811244944,0.059761674289854363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090078241691662,0.047481151177750563,0.0,0.0437290485672518,0.0,0.045879264121917125,0.0,0.0,0.05582357367437527,0.0,0.05707841354123006,0.0,0.06242054184217375,0.06335063992423752,0.16123699039112455,0.045241777355334564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0567861102161092,0.04124009677480425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13412303578816098,0.056971136760437135,0.0,0.06413596035738071,0.0,0.06953594118367662,0.0597998519662481,0.0,0.0,0.059502089619933474,0.0,0.26675774730538976,0.061161507015914066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05658480041936871,0.0,0.0,0.18060899872093306,0.0948052676792968,0.0,0.0,0.06720223879385698,0.0,0.14762228154780405,0.0,0.0595289519376265,0.0,0.10080457573696776,0.09159044552169393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945212551998043,0.0,0.05199337884186376,0.0,0.06802741595404686,0.0,0.03951984976388637,0.07623244329695228,0.0,0.0472252328916104,0.06937352046115093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609112573630951,0.040387083713764815,0.0,0.058109170400125525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04908217316626382,0.14034551692522346,0.0,0.0954321490699276,0.0,0.0,0.1102882208483436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05734237339598323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062130774162945,0.2112857094246068,0.0,0.0,0.229842170620018
mentalhealth,Geriatricknight,2020/01/15,"SSRIs I just wanted to give a little positive story about my experience with mental health and meds.

I had a traumatic adolescence, and I've had OCD and BDD since I was 19. I was severely unwell until my mid-twenties, when things started to turn around. I learned some management techniques, improved my self-esteem, got a girlfriend, got a good job, etc. But the OCD, BDD, and anxiety NEVER went away. I just learned to live with it without wanting to constantly kill myself. I saw therapists on and off but never one I liked. I never considered meds because I was just so adverse to the idea of it and I had stolen random stuff from my dad's assortment of anti-anxiety meds when I was a teen and they messed me up to the point where I couldn't feel anything and put my hand through a window.

In any case I had developed great coping skills over the years and learned how to mitigate many of my symptoms through working out, diet management, meditation, limiting coffee, getting enough sleep and a bunch of other stuff. But the symptoms were still there, just minimized. I would still hit a mind-shattering low usually once a month and just had to wait it out.

Finally I started with another therapist about a year ago and slowly, slowly, she convinced me to try an SSRI. She also had severe anxiety and OCD and finally decided to take one and it worked for her, so very slowly she convinced me to try it. 

I started with a crazily low dose, and slowly built my way up to a normal dose. It did nothing at first. But as time went on the periods between when I was fine and when I would hit the mind-shattering BDD episodes got longer and longer. And then after some time passed I realized I hadn't had an episode in months. I am 33 now and I have not gone this long without an episode since before I first developed symptoms as a teenager. 

I have had zero side effects from the pill, and it was the first one I tried, which I realize may not be realistic for everyone. But for me this is a miracle. All of my life's problems are still there, all of my normal human feelings are still there, but I just don't have the brutal anxiety, OCD, and BDD alongside it. The relief is immeasurable. I can drink coffee whenever I want, I don't have to run marathons to stay alive anymore, I can sleep six hours instead of eight if I feel like it, all these things that normal people get to not worry about that I've had to govern so strictly for so long, I can now be flexible with. 

If you haven't ever tried an SSRI, going purely on my experience, I strongly recommend it. I take Escitalopram.",6.348769357836051,6.381522379241518,6.810260857595158,77.00658682634733,65.72654690618762,10.183797921398584,33.64312753802739,9.921728534948242,3.2070171519030897,2036,82,385,41,29,665,239,501,0.085,0.799,0.11599999999999999,0.9568,1,0,1,0,0,2,59.0,0,1,1,9,32,16,2,0,29,0,39,13,3,2,8,85,65,44,1,12,19,1,4,2,1,3,8,0,1,1,21,30,2,2,11,2,0,7,13,7,0,9,25,5,57,9,60,32,8,67,0,2,1,0,10,20,0,6,40,288,78,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450480445642086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819287081304346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04948501381753388,0.07630402218986686,0.22267053646741888,0.0,0.07216670880180763,0.0,0.0,0.05988220077534422,0.0647793122831018,0.0,0.0,0.06836831614582208,0.0,0.0,0.044358947039362745,0.0,0.06192055686597644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863679925408543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712853381195032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518921926959768,0.08115601208965252,0.0,0.0658231924926733,0.0,0.06953333373046992,0.0,0.14236293537263564,0.0,0.0,0.1103816829178606,0.051985766310195934,0.0,0.15942847150330308,0.0,0.1856903159250496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760369811513037,0.06980608915338299,0.04135596408626364,0.061034689442480375,0.17459863387279784,0.08022742840519312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734941652934868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166222531015516,0.0,0.0,0.08214667696151423,0.0,0.0,0.07221141811171926,0.0,0.08050746361143751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05139847967070001,0.07110193844697013,0.07293306329918632,0.06425583879670982,0.1287955050968102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377574581296636,0.0,0.0,0.2424878955825647,0.0,0.0733334414966901,0.0,0.14695069937317956,0.0,0.11616610047624702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16837045038601547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21389277343824475,0.06982325152177825,0.0,0.0,0.07749598124868133,0.14792927268241945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05044845277294963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878966783726803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962954033471705,0.0,0.07315235035024881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591332134334698,0.1644151801360301,0.0,0.1203895606673976,0.0,0.14564192401620732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15451756441323228,0.07756144241721327,0.232451783407384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16660483845169086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22690272009351795,0.10942557565703276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689794641849918,0.09668819572826763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486368957348885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976198937162362,0.07915113359709101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014412245714482,0.060041558789085764,0.1287620799211427,0.05776017639664015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349140893451919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402923000861379,0.0,0.10595253761520756,0.07389985214342501,0.0,0.10338518060916484,0.0,0.0,0.09372093986646764
mentalhealth,Santiagodelos80,2020/01/15,"Should I be honest with Psychiatrist? I have an appointment with Psychiatrist soon for a review of depression. The last few days I have felt significantly better, but that coincides with me upping my Prozac dose and also upping my Zopiclone dose. The Prozac she specifically told me not to increase so don’t know whether I can tell her the truth :/",6.116935483870968,8.46212714516129,6.184709677419361,72.80706451612906,67.87096774193549,9.476129032258065,28.529032258064518,9.888512548439397,2.9960219354838724,281,10,47,7,5,89,48,62,0.12,0.773,0.107,-0.2127,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,5,0,6,4,0,0,1,11,9,5,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,1,10,3,8,5,2,6,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,38,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322604864484965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35678118711042606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601644906253469,0.0,0.3474543236152949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873345017433885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217022343049591,0.3288309876907596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3525959714071061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854731927107159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,2ndacc123,2020/01/15,"I think yesterday I wanted to kill myself Beware. Vent post incoming
So yesterday me and all of my class had a party because that day we did the first part for our finals. We had to write 15 pages on a specific theme and on that day we had to turn the paper in. So to celebrate it we decided as I said to throw a party.

I was excited for it all day long. I even went and bought new clothes and stuff to look good. I really hoped that maybe today's the day where I can maybe flirt with someone or make out with someone so I really prepared for the party.

But as usual. I talked a lot to people but I couldn't drink because I had to drive. So the party came to the point where everyone had danced and had fun while sober me was sitting there too sober to dance, browsing reddit. I don't even blame my friends why would I. Every now and then someone came up to me and grabbed my hand to dance but I was too afraid of it. I even declined the offer from the girl I like that's how uncomfortable dancing was for me. I then went to the bathroom and couldn't resist hitting myself in the face. I hated myself so bad. 

As you can probably already tell there was no flirting and also no making out so lonely ass me drove home late at night.  While driving I really thought about what I did today. I bought all that stuff spent an hour or two in the bathroom and was just simply hopeful that today is the day. all that for as usual nothing. And I found it funny. I apparently found it really funny that I was so hopeful cause I just laughed. I laughed really really hard until the laughing slowly transformed to crying then to laughing again and back to crying. After a while that cycle stopped and I just couldn't breathe anymore. I breathed really fast and unusual just like in a panic attack. But all of that stopped too suddenly. No crying, no laughing... Just plain emotionlessnes. I did not feel ANYTHING that moment. Everything was suddenly gone and away. So I held the steering wheel straight. I saw that there was a turn coming up but I held it straight, ready to smash into the tree that was there. I drove until I got In the opposite lane when I ""woke"" up again. That was the moment I realized what I was about to do and turned the steering wheel back over again. I was seriously shocked. I really was about to kill myself. That's what all has been coming to

And I know it might not sound like a suicidal attempt because I stopped it just at the right time but for me this was a really heavy experience and I wanted to write it down.",2.3019127096383123,4.521743469306934,3.453942210547588,88.65586987270157,78.66336633663366,6.498686603354213,22.97938977571227,7.5991,1.0448371388159226,1992,64,401,30,49,643,215,505,0.141,0.6970000000000001,0.162,0.8066,1,2,1,0,0,2,43.0,5,1,0,2,38,27,4,2,29,0,36,6,5,4,6,83,73,49,3,9,16,0,4,3,1,2,0,2,1,1,30,31,1,5,8,5,3,16,10,10,0,2,44,8,61,17,61,23,9,86,0,1,2,1,14,24,1,7,47,300,91,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080447543833234,0.058557185045340035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261850571004003,0.0,0.0,0.06025709099297565,0.0,0.0,0.08330284065933391,0.06879633336274364,0.11260943134395217,0.06113895919282621,0.133909963569877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674974368822196,0.0,0.07522119111819447,0.0,0.12615193872144415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412992892274781,0.23611702576303026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173161724043614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450912314486233,0.0,0.0616943556845538,0.06996864449522704,0.06580898575190057,0.07162709653039387,0.0,0.0,0.03702424106785053,0.0,0.0,0.08021328366242178,0.0,0.06228427433825549,0.0,0.16057261463694306,0.056572660182306986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061416794771140565,0.058563900637701324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06559429748140777,0.07229351409245431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734496156035068,0.2181837826352391,0.07211086391886737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16202295498950556,0.0,0.0402419807893686,0.0,0.08259983136812724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732060410194744,0.0,0.0,0.06480091220445079,0.06148969569812529,0.0,0.0,0.062252403641326226,0.0,0.0,0.09775514162995687,0.0,0.14712664643330864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776790642522927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072016976391016,0.0,0.06871573867558038,0.0,0.07026037730573091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591255575805558,0.0,0.0792944275307806,0.0,0.05076428337360128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922032291026803,0.0,0.07012832550843963,0.0,0.07894782797913516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4221823711047344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253287316518932,0.06965276679181945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18612730503557506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18365556145826226,0.0,0.0,0.16764786164283782,0.08009514213012267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058854656116417915,0.06400098019876446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04691896547818958,0.0,0.05813165565505405,0.042697487721049456,0.0,0.2082232946882066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23893996868536105,0.07152918211867745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16129172331424213,0.0,0.08637879331747053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575871381893015,0.06607324670192702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052016209780458386,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,endofthegame,2020/01/15,"I get knocked down and I get up again, just to repeatedly knocked back down. So so *so* tired and fed up. As soon as I feel I'm making headway with my mental health something else comes and challenges me. I'm no longer suicidal but fuck do I not want to live. I regret living every single day. How do people do this? How do people get through? 

I take my meds, I do the things recommended, I exercise, I eat healthily, I meditate but I still feel like absolute shit every day. I do worksheets to help with negative and catastrophic thinking. I'm on my 6th type of antidepressant, I've been to individual and group therapy. Why cant I just function and be normal, or as normal as I can be. My marriage is in the gutter and I don't have the energy to address it. I constantly feel like a terrible mother cause I don't have the mental or physical energy to be fully engaged. I'm trying to grieve in the middle of all this too, which obviously just makes everything worse. My physical health is just crap but nothing specific. I'm in and out of therapist, gp, hospital and still am a wreck. 

Is there hope? Cause I'm struggling to find it.",1.3463999999999992,3.8806670177777813,3.655555555555555,83.69666666666666,85.48888888888888,7.244444444444446,23.88888888888889,8.285830014693849,1.8990888888888893,889,35,174,22,27,305,123,225,0.23199999999999998,0.684,0.084,-0.9899,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,1,16,12,3,1,7,0,20,9,2,6,2,41,41,23,2,5,10,1,3,2,0,0,4,0,1,0,6,13,2,0,5,1,0,1,6,7,0,0,2,3,23,5,27,36,2,20,0,2,0,1,4,10,3,3,11,118,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987766973272417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639246371818408,0.0,0.11065566817642984,0.0,0.13881805913336176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16569027804689967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13144516855829494,0.1073106368767905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164637411102475,0.0,0.11545026361377422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19485751113827895,0.183541630641,0.0,0.0,0.117408789438763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187578615056586,0.2013428746955696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27309086787746656,0.0,0.0,0.08610305971355346,0.0,0.0,0.1275883272053077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12551671977309475,0.0,0.2268625100297939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17149416210922866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268849252684573,0.0,0.2589120135789751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517242135403623,0.123259445330619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17811397123613454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318608577791094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988936693592008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051743313613135,0.0,0.0,0.1342927700451543,0.0,0.1405128063812824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965848443498986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14690354965304486,0.14915027998381614,0.08534215405141501,0.0823110532863078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476442086756841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721492466646874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576818230216903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591386286233885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091023915814634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Space_Is-The_Place,2020/01/15,"Everything's too loud Ive been back and forth with how to deal with how I've been ""diagnosed"". I see a psychiatrist, i think he's great. But i feel like there's something missing. Ive been diagnosed bipolar depressive, high functioning anxiety and ocd. I take lamotragine and bupropion. Im feel like im not really getting better. The lamotragine is supposed to stabilize my mood, and the bupropion is supposed to help with seratonin imbalance. My mood is more blah now however im not having explosive episodes as much, and im not really any ""happier"". I get extremely irritable at the smallest things. My dogs help tremendously with my anxiety but i feel terrible when i scare them when i explode, yelling at the sink or the tv when its not working. Its not often, but it happens. I just suddenly see red. Ive broken things before but never caused any physical harm to anyone or anything. Im not hearing voices, but everything in my head just gets really LOUD. Like someone keeps turning the volume up and i get so overwhelmed and my anxiety kicks me right in the chest and i have a panic attack or i lash out. Ive been doing good with breathing but why is everything so loud? I feel like im going fucking bananas.",2.8823706896551715,5.569427116379309,4.559372413793107,78.90286896551726,79.56034482758622,8.884413793103446,29.538620689655172,9.3871,3.3960987586206888,969,47,171,30,25,325,123,232,0.163,0.7440000000000001,0.09300000000000001,-0.9517,1,0,1,0,1,0,28.0,0,0,1,2,14,18,2,3,9,0,15,7,3,3,1,42,34,25,0,0,17,0,4,5,0,0,3,6,0,0,5,14,0,1,5,1,0,1,7,9,0,0,4,13,25,7,16,30,2,16,0,3,3,1,6,8,1,4,11,106,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865178501741187,0.0,0.21708816299123485,0.0,0.0,0.06614101709039158,0.0,0.07784126370991698,0.0,0.0,0.10761220431806624,0.0,0.07273550960575087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049093609889416,0.0,0.0,0.08365905256557507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097172174725262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752033311955707,0.08147206347646252,0.19201804281561205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550399229358595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19131449362253852,0.202729910997872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744890050014871,0.1976819363640228,0.0,0.05375888769509237,0.07933939125198576,0.0,0.10428815792335452,0.0,0.0,0.08364750869210427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707881582342373,0.0,0.1066122059300871,0.0,0.12680622244599996,0.09994177944466068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6130543988187611,0.0,0.0,0.08407783192096815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848517479075591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953609989924066,0.0,0.07295528253670791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098348424312976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817944230921725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078116268768645,0.0,0.0,0.09470322445875012,0.0,0.15075536240362658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801476052922375,0.07282164348736851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112151007345466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125685616825543,0.060610817824079774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288907527605162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535468499955738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886419766185405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jones_mccatterson,2020/01/15,"Extremely anxious about politics/climate change I don’t want to start any kind of political debate. So I’ll refrain from talking about any political parties or candidates and would like others to do the same. 

I’m in the US. The current election cycle/political climate is making me extremely anxious. I feel like there’s so much fighting and division between people. Learning about the fires in Australia, especially how many animals have died, has been heartbreaking. I just want to cry and melt into a sad puddle. I’m very worried about how much worse climate change will get in the future. 

I know I’m not alone in how I feel. What helps you to feel better when politics or horrible world events are negatively affecting your mental health?",5.8559090909090905,8.229718932835823,6.244491180461331,71.98985753052918,68.6268656716418,9.35033921302578,34.56987788331072,9.800150414767053,3.9376955223880574,603,30,94,15,11,194,90,134,0.19699999999999998,0.685,0.11800000000000001,-0.9289,1,1,0,0,2,0,14.0,1,2,0,1,12,7,1,0,6,0,9,1,0,5,0,23,21,11,1,3,4,0,4,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,4,9,4,16,18,3,11,0,2,0,0,6,6,0,2,7,60,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17519926906146993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300698909750896,0.0,0.0,0.3822064464609994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496087217152578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578987729424914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858148737200629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556189921523846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565979050566697,0.1208482999655684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837938303938013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980970858685014,0.0,0.0,0.1133847220587172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17615463686918384,0.09296619069075417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528655813788734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11291595194256887,0.17150220325674534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17047400403062493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487048729325602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727459622555385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973267748417622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596480780099082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20347926167802965,0.0,0.0,0.13957513415591696,0.19955049959446094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17179070605501898,0.17238900836935242,0.12016677068584823,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,placidzest,2020/01/15,"Feeling Sorry! When someone hurts you and then makes you feel sorry for feeling hurt, What is it? Or is it one’s own brain playing some tricks?",2.244880952380953,4.758528964285716,2.3785714285714303,94.63309523809528,80.78571428571429,3.733333333333334,23.619047619047624,3.1291,-0.03089523809523786,113,4,22,0,3,34,23,28,0.321,0.542,0.13699999999999998,-0.7545,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,7,6,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,3,2,1,1,6,2,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905077689038108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3947471500877778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5571728332911503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17370855081195433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763416334495662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22049584901735927,0.0,0.0,0.5826224384622368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,infertihelp2,2020/01/15,"How do I know when being medicated is necessary? I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder by my psychiatrist about 12 years ago after being referred to him by my therapist I was seeing for a few months first. I had started going to therapy because I felt isolated and depressed after moving back home with my parents after living with friends, so that I could afford pre-Med courses. I was also having mild suicidal thoughts due to my constant low grade anxiety which caused depression. 

I ended up taking generic Zoloft and I remember the feeling on the first day of taking it was like the sun had come out for the first time in months and I was able to breathe without a weight on my chest. It was honestly a great feeling and the medication REALLY worked for me. That year I made a lot of new friends, met my future wife, and excelled at work. After about a year my doctor and I decided to wean me off of the pills because we had originally discussed not wanting to be on them forever. 

I’m now a decade older, a father of a 1 year old, and happily married with more responsibilities at work. It’s hard to tell if my anxiety has built back up over the years or my new responsibilities are just more stressful. I don’t really have suicidal thoughts anymore (unless I have a really bad day like once a year) but I always wonder if I should be back on Zoloft to improve my quality of life. 

Obviously this is more of a discussion to have with a medical professional, but I wanted to get third party impressions first (I’ve talked to my wife but she’s obviously biased and just wants the best for me). The anxiety isn’t exactly preventing me from doing ok in life, but I get the feeling sometimes that being on Zoloft could greatly improve my enjoyment and fulfillment in life. Sometimes things feel a bit blunted and unemotional I suppose and I don’t know the last time I’ve really been super happy other than the birth of my daughter. How do I know if I should be on medication or not?

TLDR: have GAD and maybe some depression. Zoloft worked amazingly when I took it for a year 10+ years ago. How do I know when to seek out a professional to discuss being medicated again?",5.928228779018255,6.778057318181823,7.075050505050509,71.9122053872054,66.72727272727273,10.59450646819068,33.424065213538896,10.585719281625627,3.7371400673400683,1741,75,311,46,27,589,204,418,0.084,0.775,0.141,0.9837,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,1,0,1,11,17,21,0,1,27,1,37,18,2,6,3,71,64,30,2,10,15,5,7,2,2,2,15,0,1,0,11,21,1,1,15,0,0,4,6,6,0,5,16,8,45,15,59,37,8,66,0,4,1,0,17,18,0,8,46,229,56,9,0.07159976639673771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269377456560202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057258307319188025,0.059576741379783575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21909450126530253,0.0,0.07100772883440674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516740230780955,0.059782814217035615,0.08729310606089281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513953747882897,0.0,0.07816840072832397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735526831528202,0.0,0.061676858874201025,0.0,0.0773739111918585,0.0,0.11433317468355607,0.0,0.0,0.09235185205002004,0.0,0.1850063216440342,0.0726722557294464,0.0,0.0,0.0820595354035144,0.07328539484893905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341614109092318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14481197288983366,0.0,0.06874700408363223,0.0,0.0,0.2436108988812299,0.0,0.0,0.11063560381443932,0.0,0.07481584554183564,0.0,0.04069179726053015,0.0,0.0,0.15787799044356707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762192827215735,0.0641393270641102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182040358404321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15739743646395754,0.05836336590686202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171909738800854,0.06996005843509763,0.0,0.06322390549684924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06087156095863006,0.0,0.06774943017451902,0.0,0.0,0.07193158900822456,0.0,0.0,0.36064615983624176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430050087251845,0.07609922048728893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830300110470767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513191045626692,0.0762514144489405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950306732249697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18347457508220344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110857778720659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05705574376519456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162799953531952,0.0,0.050678683177586135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201729049710411,0.0,0.0,0.15663704665139366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766822725894934,0.057549180078750435,0.06258135171819962,0.0,0.08188057285618533,0.08313284733812537,0.04756770329249728,0.0,0.0,0.11368443349498687,0.08350079915201329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07954997496384057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669419192032902,0.0,0.0,0.08718922638185389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901961976283293,0.07764689241571293,0.2085019307437086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688632165515734
mentalhealth,marblephalanx,2020/01/15,"I have a persistent feeling of emptiness and I don’t know what to make of it. I’m 17F and live in the UK. For as long as I can remember I (mostly) haven’t felt anything. Sometimes I get feelings of sadness and oddly enough despair and a few hours later I’ll be happy, only for things to fall back in place to feeling nothing (It’s nothing extreme like how bipolar is described, so that’s ruled out). 

The last time I really felt something was when I first got with my current boyfriend of over a year ago but sadly enough that excitement and love died down and now I just don’t know how to feel. I do want to feel like that again and be happy and have my sad times and to actually have variation in my life. 

I can’t be pretty reckless sometimes too such as this most recent New Years. I went to a family friends house for a party and I got extremely drunk (more than anyone else) and this has happened before on multiple occasions but that could just be underage me taking advantage of the holidays. 

I do get pretty anxious and irritable sometimes and I’ve noticed that it causes a lot of arguments. I don’t really go outside of the house (or even my room) that often unless it’s for college or maybe if I’m included in a planned meet-up with my friends so I guess I do isolate myself quite a bit. 

I feel like whatever it is clouds the way I think; I seemingly can’t think straight all the time or make decisions for myself and end up just mindlessly scrolling through reddit or staring at a wall. Even now I’m struggling to come up with how to describe what’s going on so any questions to point me in the right direction are welcome. 

I know someone is going to tell me to see a doctor but my local GP will only refer me off to someplace I can’t get to without asking for a ride from my parents (I can’t drive yet and I still live with my parents) and that includes telling them which I’d prefer not to; I’ve never had that close of a relationship with them so it’s best to avoid the awkwardness. 
In fact I’m very awkward anyway. I did once go to the doctors and got referred to camhs (during a pretty bad time and my family found out) but I got dismissed almost instantly because I just can’t seem to talk about myself as if it’s serious. I’m very good at hiding and masking things so anyone I know probably has no clue about me.

Another point to add is that I used to self harm (to be specific it was cutting my arms) a few years back and haven’t done it for 3 years now. The point is that I’ve never really been emotionally stable (even in childhood I remember having disturbed thoughts and I guess things were always pretty unstable in the household; things are better now) but now I don’t even have that because I don’t have any emotions to be unstable. 

I do miss having a variety of emotions even though strangely enough I can’t really remember what that feels like. 

Sorry if I’ve been really vague and haven’t given enough details but I’m always open to give more if needed.",4.401549022774997,5.242918993377487,5.452385721208209,82.21046276853501,70.15894039735099,8.475464383782912,29.797932482636085,8.700769036622559,2.257942787917945,2368,91,468,39,41,783,269,604,0.14800000000000002,0.727,0.125,-0.7275,3,1,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,2,7,35,29,1,5,26,0,51,7,1,7,4,103,104,51,1,8,21,2,9,4,2,1,4,0,1,1,31,33,1,1,27,2,0,9,19,14,0,1,18,11,54,15,75,78,14,72,0,5,2,1,16,30,0,18,36,324,85,3,0.0,0.0,0.05862685938154904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0532549750225072,0.0,0.06015882075056494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999783904371638,0.0,0.0,0.08170936093982277,0.06299637414734778,0.0,0.06787034225784504,0.0,0.08401500589571084,0.061556378332410476,0.049438567149493615,0.0,0.05616424310137368,0.0,0.0,0.0923915980911402,0.05016210523433739,0.07324522991777968,0.0,0.05112142788534673,0.0,0.06304750680670372,0.053133562981959585,0.06558894215148366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06171602124960305,0.0,0.05175134569843372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04796690165363719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062350838388548165,0.0,0.0,0.12298349405923074,0.0,0.061480021063318575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050186944398324,0.202736908488464,0.05321072928099123,0.2483039846664109,0.0,0.1984027238003594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327121957579454,0.0,0.21263850919782076,0.1287578829068042,0.11536741782911601,0.0,0.0,0.05110179114999565,0.0,0.06587174936825012,0.09283127390183862,0.0,0.09416385878826858,0.057631699927000964,0.13657344459875775,0.05039005837095021,0.1921974849101683,0.0,0.13236402075638865,0.0,0.053126231233519866,0.12790698232723194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05916412042653223,0.13864246729849375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206783379010145,0.048971085433042384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04243443219655412,0.117403098511938,0.0,0.10609885942622703,0.053166593285122916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05107564249986545,0.05422218358737281,0.0,0.08020423910348183,0.0,0.06035580600813317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044546618135348784,0.09267076259302316,0.058023110709148486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529173825477435,0.06839849854931866,0.0,0.06398045200697297,0.0,0.09138311367508976,0.0,0.0,0.1334176479215419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276807824478926,0.0,0.1703776365195516,0.0,0.0,0.2444811862139897,0.06477357984818975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730041813160452,0.0638996917176103,0.0,0.0,0.19243554907114552,0.0,0.05931916776135882,0.06450062583328219,0.2041678901029348,0.05130575668494134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047873895875539405,0.10938438597090168,0.06267381268858471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050903371518705005,0.046250504422734436,0.17825420339935094,0.06725171147743966,0.0,0.0,0.04797787553817337,0.0,0.0,0.06280592473876896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045170715170338605,0.04828792463298756,0.1050205612334946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15965097458620792,0.07699032220618322,0.05902572360711302,0.047694731263224335,0.14012642024540195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05188756954621911,0.0,0.0991402653049009,0.035435196948155154,0.047686630123447975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05569233577877557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0579124531877692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15475145932878848
mentalhealth,InCrisisNeedAdvice,2020/01/15,"My mother told me to find somewhere else to kill myself.  

Last night, during an hour-long completely one-sided tirade, my mother screamed that when I kill myself, not to do it in the house, because she didn't want to deal with the mess.

I was already building the resolve to commit suicide throughout her rant. I got hit with the typical ""you're not depressed, you're lazy"", and all the related tropes about how my situation is all my fault and anything she's doing is just in response to me ""hurting"" her by existing.

I've posted about my situation here before, and to be honest I'm extremely surprised I made it this long. But when my own mother's response to knowing I am suicidal is to tell me not to get the carpets dirty, I'm feeling like it's time to cash out.",6.848026315789473,6.084008276315791,7.191052631578947,77.34736842105265,64.92105263157895,9.705263157894738,35.44736842105263,8.841846274778883,2.9579184210526317,606,25,116,8,8,198,96,152,0.193,0.7070000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.9547,0,0,0,0,0,4,20.0,0,0,0,1,7,11,2,0,7,0,9,0,0,2,3,21,19,7,4,1,5,3,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,5,6,0,0,4,0,1,0,4,7,0,0,5,2,20,4,19,12,3,10,0,2,0,0,10,3,0,0,7,75,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18106443753983095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502242579071091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002058303178657,0.0,0.1396185124478291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17203293157733532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16915747913331056,0.14132036301159487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13706633032455606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296289714058716,0.11721754015229445,0.0,0.0,0.14996455509528658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857241176169228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312283715918246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158403287879178,0.1893242799254921,0.1756491685155339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3630565640650068,0.0,0.0901731194663404,0.13374567933531334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016034884513254,0.0,0.0,0.2904081898117449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552548147708195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15397632997349672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118367385978338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15714161554685616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36886167273954334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3589499660951648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434116293537603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567535160197574,0.0,0.0,0.15678380674126355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677760756787047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustaSlawBack,2020/01/15,"Extreme topic, with the potential to save more than people know need it. I’m writing a book based off of someone deciding since I fall in the millennial category that I’m unable to handle things, and that since I have no military experience can’t have ptsd. Literally had a therapy session, the first ever I was so excited 13 year to late. Like 12 hours before and. I felt peace? Idk how to describe it but when I clocked in yeah. 14 hours away, over 165 miles. Atlanta traffic. Definitely not “I’ll make absolutely sure you make the appointment no worries.” 
If I told y’all a positive to the easy way is, blank, I’m not saying it because I’m not holding responsibility if your going through a bad time instead comment. Message me. 
Realizing this scared me. What made me leave the company all together is I understood the evil. What drives someone to become an active shooter in school, it never got that bad but at 25. The best company ever like really the managers are the only negative. If This didn’t happen I’d be there. But being there and their discrimination man. They have no idea what happened. I told the only person today I actually admitted I had been molested, but I don’t know how many times. I know one yeah. But I just know I felt uncomfortable in another with someone else. It is who you don’t expect sadly. 2 out of the acceptable zero is science. 
I’ll tell anyone who reads this today, there’s so much guilt because I feel responsible at 12 years old for two people deaths. Broken back in someone I had to help move, I wasn’t very strong just fat. And the other, had the look on the face like he had given up. I replaced their son, who drunk driving stole. But when it came to the end I can’t recall the last time I saw my dad alive. And the state alone I found him in for some reason despite the ambulance and fire trucks, my grandma whom was chief of police, I felt like he could wake up. And well it didn’t help me and gran stood not even 5 feet from him. And they didn’t cover him up. And yeah y’all 

Please understand I still haven’t talked to anyone at the time of writing this. I’m not going to regret hurting those I care about by me making a rash decision. But I was so close to me not hurting myself with all this shit I have not been able to answer, or come up with a reason and accept it. I want to move on. Stop being freaked out when I’m suppose to freak out and show compassion I literally just said my mental health is not okay. 3 years I’ve tried. And now I feel farther than ever and it’s literally another job with insurance. Not hard for a truck driver. But I’m . Taking a breath. Because this was by meant to be this long. 


IF YOU SKIPPED HERE
The books topic is from an active shooters perspective, which the happy ending is the pain he’s been dealing with ending for the second time since he was 12 hours from it. AND the person truly responsible is face to face, the last one. He hears what he went through, how his family never asked about if he’s okay. The time he lost control and cried reentering the home and his mother Yells and bitches at him “why you crying like that damn attention seekin your embarrassing me crying like that.” 

Parents, NO, bad. Don’t do this, ever. Okay? Okay.
No more of the book because spoilers. 

Anyway, it’s exactly the opposite of how I reacted. I’m not evil, I’m the nicest most pushover  guy alive. So if I say I can understand what would drive it, the way I paint imagery when I actually try and write, pulling emotion from using the correct synonym, and resonating tone. I can really have the reader understanding that they’re not crazy, they’re driven crazy in atleast most cases. Compassion is humanity, but humanity is so afraid to show compassion. Yet it’s so simple. In many cases that’s all it takes. I’ve been thrust through many moments, I don’t know why I’m attracting them but they won’t beat me.

Instead I want to use them to try and get some good. Eventually I’ll get a therapist. Eventually I know. If I can save someone who may be put in that situation, or forced into that situation of hurting others, then I will be able to say I’m okay with anything in life. Because this wasn’t school. I’m 25 and was bullied into this at a great job, by practically the whole warehouse and I did what I was told, and made my money and went home. No extra because I was fixed on therapy and insurance. Then my great granddad beat alshymers and I can’t do math very well. 10 days, not 33. Lol insurance right there. But nope bad math is over a month away and I couldn’t even simply tell my boss I needed another grievance day. I had to panic attack it to him.

I’ll keep y’all posted on the book, I feel like if I do it right maybe it will do something. Stop ignoring how you feel, it will build up. I promise. You can’t keep it down forever. I tried. Now I’m making it or nahhhhh YEEEEET",2.2205116959064317,4.445737640946501,3.818011262724714,85.91291033138401,78.96913580246914,6.9321377517868745,23.811825860948662,7.997740175438593,1.3735286419753083,3825,132,772,69,95,1270,398,972,0.16899999999999998,0.6709999999999999,0.16,-0.9549,3,1,1,2,0,1,112.0,0,11,7,8,41,55,7,5,49,9,71,13,9,18,12,163,144,67,1,17,37,5,9,7,0,6,4,6,2,6,55,43,2,7,30,8,1,15,38,26,2,6,45,17,91,29,89,85,13,106,0,6,2,0,70,40,3,16,54,487,146,15,0.10206652747880664,0.0,0.09960220754572063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052855070406956715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605384801090009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136728917815036,0.0,0.041996027741651835,0.0,0.04770921261212819,0.058057704904732416,0.09589486239096773,0.03924142972022617,0.17044257424620524,0.1866564234114691,0.05636223032026921,0.0434255486647506,0.0,0.05355626179233703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05836845830129165,0.05203181357105687,0.0,0.0,0.04396063791750685,0.0,0.0,0.057238144730235786,0.0407459084814489,0.0,0.16817293164084784,0.06582446647068625,0.052613054052233814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04263174340889735,0.057405552817317525,0.13560097259377726,0.0,0.0,0.06741397878740524,0.18465003504711328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04992032445268647,0.048109619209347664,0.0,0.1032158060985926,0.03645817381235798,0.14699980882285502,0.0,0.0,0.043408868066381605,0.0,0.055955339593382704,0.0,0.0,0.053325547967107964,0.0,0.05800675969025459,0.042804280367813134,0.040815962989765836,0.11252870687187966,0.0,0.0505309545403048,0.09025709316962532,0.0543258582102781,0.04571578035594994,0.0,0.0,0.0542459729319866,0.057518197218941476,0.0,0.0684130418989824,0.0,0.1023810490572177,0.0,0.15077245474549686,0.0,0.16389649298429187,0.057610342971574476,0.0,0.0,0.10128527939916382,0.09072141929682156,0.0,0.0,0.1682792826961746,0.08319784253318173,0.05756774435055305,0.05403685767845093,0.0,0.0,0.03604630341205154,0.17452592411345874,0.0,0.0,0.045162832486216435,0.042855088485191366,0.0,0.05570883585438401,0.0,0.0,0.09657781616583744,0.13626039930335646,0.1552191583328417,0.05126977276309029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051429526697586485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04073426423105557,0.10848056592731477,0.03751532081104621,0.07568103684526142,0.07871999819348517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05355082557552315,0.0,0.06916292052213245,0.0776261934415084,0.054302990731350725,0.059876539267255814,0.05666640000302275,0.0,0.0,0.07076007877948694,0.08912055490500316,0.0,0.05601919858438596,0.0,0.0,0.048875759765292036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059655154339609114,0.05130252554012656,0.0,0.0,0.051047074065341695,0.0,0.06538643106572807,0.10494138940435993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716425678486944,0.04854432031597821,0.12175109895238585,0.051093199827983535,0.10329677488039096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05238491186079172,0.12664572938529187,0.1147270533060418,0.0,0.0,0.2162015937859803,0.03928789968627643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040755230344641694,0.08533218720884851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0480982471205193,0.0,0.07674132632799105,0.04101860428805955,0.08921064378078078,0.0,0.11672196935808793,0.05925355258990634,0.03390423278970786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17854743891049055,0.0,0.0967471337241006,0.14629341145641442,0.0,0.13859294467057162,0.0,0.049852083250149316,0.1593822820122887,0.0,0.08815270893756988,0.0,0.08421557444150134,0.060201482359541376,0.08101565870687756,0.0,0.0,0.09177006590062442,0.09461669353363547,0.09209916561682678,0.056976816462127676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051826756540936526,0.0,0.036252566344604366,0.0,0.0,0.09859124597069972
mentalhealth,hazeminus,2020/01/15,"I have had a serious mental health problem for the past 10 years. Not anymore! Ask me anything! 

Here is a list of what I do everyday and on a weekly basis that has helped me limit my mental health to near enough inexistent. 

Disclosure, these are not cures. They are things that can help, mental health needs constant work and consistency, the journey doesn’t ever end. It’s a constant battle. 

I also want to add, I know a lot of people dealing with mental health and you try to help them and they come back saying what you said didn’t work. They act victorious! Deep down they don’t want to find something that’s truly works. 

You have to give everything your best and actually want to change. That’s the most important thing. 

This is not in any sort of order. They are all equally important and valuable. 


1, Vega-Test Therapy (Bach Remedies) 
2, Cold Showers 
3, Daily meditation 
4, Psychedelic micro-dosing & CBD (not THC) 
5, Healthy diet 
6, Running/exercise 2/3 times a week 
7, NoFap
8, Being honest with people about how you feel. 
9, Journaling/daily diary 
10, Schedule each day 
11, 8 hours minimum of sleep. 
12, Cutting down on social media use. 


You will still have bad days but this is how I cut those days down from 20 - 25 days a month to 2/3 

Some on this list might be controversial but I’m not encouraging I’m providing information. Go do your research. There’s a lot of science behind everything I’ve listed that goes hand in hand with mental health. 

Hope this helps just 1 person.",2.7901291079812225,5.400627426056342,4.015380281690145,83.13548826291081,79.3169014084507,6.744413145539906,23.19906103286385,7.908726449838941,1.4441999061032869,1175,39,215,21,30,383,182,284,0.059000000000000004,0.8079999999999999,0.133,0.9604,1,0,1,0,0,0,50.0,0,7,6,5,10,11,3,0,11,0,21,9,3,3,2,42,36,11,0,6,8,0,3,0,0,2,5,2,1,1,16,12,1,1,4,0,0,4,8,6,0,0,3,6,21,5,28,29,9,34,0,0,0,0,26,10,0,7,19,128,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.08772137152454867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718863922664695,0.0,0.0973976630932959,0.0,0.061129465944848436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891484517781174,0.0,0.0,0.0739732430205353,0.0,0.08403664271740315,0.0,0.0,0.06912119962928116,0.07505584839667655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433583559872487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509354205179282,0.07743377473732435,0.0,0.19428207334606173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318909438238993,0.09267443714916854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961740065201295,0.09288219733975353,0.0,0.0,0.08131222552950679,0.0,0.0,0.16157779991496024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04545196485642265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215942213721712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623234835053824,0.05108754758661632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4777535822278927,0.0,0.0,0.24101015483177385,0.0,0.0,0.08928278099749651,0.08852525691479134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0494021496143366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15284548614233973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4529486574581964,0.0953609310182676,0.0,0.0,0.07175072951573519,0.0,0.0,0.06665358644203534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581183760927942,0.1246392286410402,0.07849000037180008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601425535296855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550763005709265,0.07148551990223563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995665907176498,0.09163330893463004,0.0,0.06920305342061922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178765994699035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279903921243692,0.0,0.1194401559598176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05241659667778696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06103059103658781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763760183787423,0.0,0.0,0.1590614323874025,0.0,0.14421146381619998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19632677270136045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057887333557300566
mentalhealth,justpeachyboii,2020/01/15,"I dunno what to do with myself anymore I saw one of my high school friends Instagram for a while wondering how she was doing and saw that she got into a college that I want to go to and it triggered me I guess. She graduated 19 while I was 18 and she’s doing better than me. I don’t even have a job. It makes me feel so useless seeing people whom I went to school before while I’m here crying not being able to go to college. On top of that I’m always home alone either making food for my sisters. A person my age shouldn’t be doing this, staying home all the time. 
I feel like a mess I dunno how long I can keep going. It’s messing me up so much.",0.44145896656534944,2.2787916312056784,2.8995592705167184,92.21250000000002,83.04255319148936,4.879635258358664,18.58206686930091,5.773587663045528,-0.2729720364741639,504,12,112,3,14,174,87,141,0.084,0.8290000000000001,0.087,-0.1571,1,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,6,6,0,0,6,0,12,1,0,5,1,22,30,10,0,2,2,1,2,1,1,1,0,0,2,1,9,5,1,1,3,0,0,4,3,3,0,1,6,5,22,3,15,21,3,16,0,1,3,0,8,5,0,4,7,81,31,6,0.16712264728190968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17308866103074771,0.0,0.0,0.13905943045468894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657407589087154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14220906367230846,0.0,0.0,0.14780640044297258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18357638056422898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103829323584762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16900446387886414,0.11939245261088015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020853684680616,0.0,0.12911854272435233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849389553796817,0.0,0.13366324797571866,0.0,0.18410443755487804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17657425252338227,0.33527528314302824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16584343997978088,0.1485462877259652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164768377095799,0.0,0.0,0.14789828380147746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22311132957859756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285437513045615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324663096632902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158618009215591,0.14592504938555442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382740826032117,0.1331751124415971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17813050562673802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745055959480983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985732673653548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492436836048598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18123738200239195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gary_The_Ghost,2020/01/15,"It’s like I have so much hatred for some things and I just want them to stop. It’s like when someone talks to me for too long, or the tv is too loud, or someone is breathing, I could hear a bug crawling, or maybe I’m just walking down the street. It’s like the existence of them just annoys me so much and all I want is for them to like stop, the sound, the touch, the smell, just everything. I have this picture in my head whenever it happens of whatever it is just stopping, falling without a sound, maybe they fall apart, but it would probably be like a switch that just turns off. Honestly though I want to just lose perception all together, no thinking, no feeling, no seeing, no hearing, it would be so peaceful, so perfect.",9.103540229885065,6.007690400000001,8.401896551724139,77.868591954023,62.24137931034483,11.873563218390805,40.0287356321839,9.725611199111238,3.6069080459770113,568,23,119,8,6,179,81,145,0.151,0.654,0.195,0.8534,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,4,2,15,9,1,0,9,0,11,2,2,0,3,30,22,12,0,6,12,0,2,5,0,2,0,5,0,0,10,2,0,3,3,1,0,3,5,2,0,0,0,9,13,7,13,17,5,13,0,1,1,0,7,5,0,4,10,86,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105201713108177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362615344023286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666095807959361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13407239641675325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560044384173774,0.0,0.34176161752615103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3703564698354755,0.0,0.0,0.13417425639923405,0.0,0.16961809043521314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30463472982323764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22290852881900494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16346631170891987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081730242874646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569253209476313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38027008500281057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12186216908703673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072608321752062,0.09714859081297053,0.1489606928722891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16491327838752556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682788706461766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461511799534217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215405494477598,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheMournfulLady,2020/01/15,"Should I tell my doctor... Should I tell my doctor I have been seeing/feeling things when waking up on morning between being sleep and awake? I DO take medication.

1st time: When I woke up on Christmas Eve 2019 I felt a warm hand  helding mine. I removed my hand from the hand, but the hand held my hand again. Next I felt someone’s weigth straddling me and I was kissed. The whole experience creeped me out and it ended when I turned on my belly in my bed. 

2nd time: Was last week and I saw huge face of a man in my room

3rd time: Yesterday I was dreaming of a puppy being on me while I was sleeping. My sisters cat was also there. In the dream I was in a different bed and when I woke up I was in my own bed, the puppy’s weight was still on me. 

I have been on antidepressants for four months now. They have helped my depression a lot and I am feeling great at the moment. However, I am scared that my doctor will tell me to stop them if I tell her about my experiences.",1.7513930348258704,3.5185843631840825,3.206791044776121,91.96053482587065,78.50248756218906,6.058706467661692,21.61442786069652,6.937597516519254,0.3841562189054724,751,21,168,8,18,246,107,201,0.057999999999999996,0.782,0.16,0.9578,2,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,0,10,5,0,1,11,0,21,15,9,0,0,18,31,14,0,3,2,1,10,0,0,3,4,0,4,1,3,7,1,3,3,2,0,1,0,2,0,1,17,11,41,3,23,9,3,39,0,1,1,1,10,18,0,2,20,121,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786323672540556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617167651583525,0.0,0.0,0.14092056492631752,0.0,0.4141652240455032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194633680065093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638764299557524,0.0,0.0,0.13639844455596314,0.0,0.2590113023879169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14870533075677445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040701085500097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10994494681462047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146698862913361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13587709429017272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765967909876832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14344607698493184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350380963409244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699541903985697,0.0,0.11428312084201225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077150920319154,0.11276545759597473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141273841625592,0.0,0.4715631649637633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960807053063345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359482899700363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671036745541718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081923488555672,0.16424712160464622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15058835337218338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,debacin333,2020/01/15,"I think my gf might have Multiple Personality Disorder In the last few years I've noticed my gf's personality changing. She's starting to have blowups out of nowhere, like we are laughing and talking about random stuff and she will get triggered and go into a bout of anger or depression, followed by her doing what I call 'ramping herself up'. When ramping, regardless of whether I respond or stay silent, she will start to get this strange creepy look/smile on her face, then get more and more aggressive and angry, talking herself into a frenzy. Once she hits a peak she will start saying incredibly hurtful things, saying I don't love her, bringing random past things up, saying nasty stuff about friends and family etc. It's like she flips a switch into another person I don't know.

Queue present day. She had an episode that culminated with me being silent and her ramping up to telling me she hates me, then launching into verbal attacks aimed at what I'd call my triggers (actions and words she knows will get under my skin to hurt me). She kept at it until I finally snapped, and told her I'd had enough. I wanted to end things bc I didn't want to continue being treated like this. Then I started repeating to her the things she had just said to me. I could see her expression and body language melt away as I was talking, like changing from one person into another. 

On to the reason I think she might have MPD. She started denying each thing I told her she'd said. After a few minutes of this, she started to break down crying. Then she told me (she's never said this before and we've been together for 8 years) that over the last few years she has been more and more unable to remember things that happen when she's angry when she's happy, and can't remember happy things when she's angry, and has been unable to remember lots of things like what she's had for breakfast etc. She told me that she honestly thinks what I tell her she's just said to me is a lie, and that she really can't remember anything that she was screaming at me half an hour before, like it's a total blank in her memory. 

I don't know if she's saying all that to excuse her actions, or if she's really going crazy and has something like MPD that needs to be treated. I told her I wanted to record everything said between us for a couple days to play things back to her so she can hear them herself, and that I want to go with her to see professional help later this week when I can get her an appointment.

Where should I go from here? The way I see it, I'm looking at two outcomes: One, my gf is making it all up which is kinda crazy, OR Two, my gf is telling the truth which means she has legit mental issues that require professional treatment. Either way, I put a pin in processing my emotions about last night and whether I'm ending things until I can see a professional about it and go from there.

tl;dr My gf told me that she has no memory of times that's she angry, or many other things she's done, and that it's been happening more and more frequently.",7.15142834216017,6.2170312139303565,7.142397688974483,78.50056812710642,64.38971807628523,10.036034879366607,33.05028620339164,9.11188708381993,2.656231733804098,2414,82,475,34,31,774,245,603,0.13699999999999998,0.821,0.042,-0.9943,1,0,1,0,0,0,55.0,2,0,1,1,16,25,4,0,19,0,46,5,3,5,5,81,102,43,0,10,12,0,1,7,6,7,0,11,0,4,45,31,1,2,12,1,0,10,8,8,0,5,24,17,96,17,67,65,18,79,0,3,5,1,94,24,0,13,48,343,141,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138194990854287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0446618795495677,0.0,0.0,0.06174313054869687,0.05099107015399966,0.041732423321059364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236428910705813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06028483168906155,0.0,0.0,0.11083716764753564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148268251502755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04333240438669645,0.06005180678568204,0.05961610831899281,0.07000291577606986,0.0,0.04674507211497048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062201316139976585,0.0,0.0,0.05553990444609688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06104958071690561,0.09613916093911826,0.056078297239660894,0.12105700825089576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04877688163328738,0.0,0.05116355364658448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059453185578175485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04193102078484602,0.0,0.14177645650635967,0.0,0.15422237849994389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959864930186695,0.11554878241057664,0.0,0.05358314126031336,0.0,0.0,0.06116937563484909,0.0,0.03637790525937608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05344776300162181,0.0,0.11620028245355656,0.0,0.0,0.05664668935588671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948071351769933,0.13271869585592536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560459691528194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115094464581376,0.0,0.0,0.0461407828901679,0.04898330942664862,0.0,0.036227506911485435,0.05502408780097623,0.0,0.05911897590683344,0.0,0.0,0.05469420443259613,0.11514970118831168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04024258404345592,0.041858519323396064,0.0,0.0,0.050931334276427334,0.0,0.0,0.061789927979582264,0.0,0.057798747128365996,0.07355329043637558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05180951650543126,0.0,0.18955561764286652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05455914141111171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953707446805288,0.05580146439294467,0.0,0.0,0.2459219523385141,0.0,0.2581292449973238,0.17263959502359907,0.0,0.0,0.17299353880516233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04178184313855204,0.0,0.0,0.2304873488536771,0.05784756996363745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425871345677557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086723167780054,0.1423104246282665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3966207107559083,0.10432743185469268,0.0,0.0,0.031646898684321745,0.0,0.0,0.3111598440478949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603325395963344,0.0,0.06528348060630157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280459842720118,0.08615842462659377,0.0435343562322797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048496867197278
mentalhealth,dankreddit79,2020/01/15,"What to do when you no longer feel genuine joy or loved? I don't think I know how to feel good anymore. I'm constantly feeling failure, dissatisfaction, dissapointment, selfhatred, grief and anxiety in my everyday. I can no longer enjoy things I used to... I don't feel like I'm genuinely liked or loved by anyone. I don't want to feel like this. I don't know what to do. (I'm not suicidal)",1.862307692307692,4.156328243589743,3.945833333333337,84.13875,80.66666666666667,8.002564102564103,25.134615384615394,8.841846274778883,2.0521230769230776,305,12,64,8,8,104,45,78,0.233,0.526,0.24100000000000002,0.5801,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,2,9,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,0,15,22,5,2,1,3,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,8,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,5,9,8,7,22,0,4,0,1,0,2,3,1,0,2,6,35,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626593975408807,0.0,0.2108692701322483,0.14867403884796665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297747083046938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5375540721225998,0.30380214869441463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17834179539530154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337089433267392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3116370577424425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3838091037735534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325798912684395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126021265301958,0.13624306792060728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836418256047516,0.0,0.0,0.1254131637911205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jwnfwjvnwojqv,2020/01/15,"Short bouts of extreme emotion anger, helplessness and suicidal thoughts. Followed by calm acceptance of the same things and not caring about them. I seem to have these bouts of extreme emotions which make me suicidal and think that there is no way forward in relation to things that concern me, followed by not caring much about them/accepting them only for some weeks later the same emotion to creep out in the same ways. 

For example about 90 mins ago I was so distraught about certain things to the point of crying and thinking my only solution was suicide followed by being content and not caring about those same things. Does anyone know why these things can happen and how best to guard against doing something stupid during that period ?",13.45824427480916,10.26983192366412,10.57151145038168,65.93512977099239,54.190839694656496,13.228091603053436,46.047328244274816,10.793553405168565,5.062815572519084,606,26,94,9,5,177,82,131,0.249,0.6659999999999999,0.085,-0.9823,3,0,1,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,2,1,8,11,2,1,4,0,7,0,0,2,1,25,20,8,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,12,7,0,1,6,0,0,4,4,4,0,0,3,0,7,7,23,16,7,16,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,2,6,73,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458828009762785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038718940261306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356587880544563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39539201578488137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199482517048176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312329563374422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4362272941858485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431126317391185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104231071290172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862873920372953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950268518447798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19662827410150888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220004063860115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768072985334603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09951681985033373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4241946242844086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4293995675054771,0.16565942622337562,0.0,0.10262435054868872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052138387892677,0.1036909901772747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664426128965798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LoolerMeister,2020/01/15,"I get anxious whenever I have to study When I have an exam and I have to study, I try to prepare myself as much as I can. Calm music, comfortable clothes and such so I can focus just on what I need to do. However, I can never get myself to actually focus and start to get anxious so I just go away and procrastinate, even though I know I should be studying.
I find this weird because I don't have any issue when I have to do essays or assignments, just when I study for an exam.
I don't really know what to do so any help is welcome.",1.4344247787610631,3.070927530973453,3.958592920353983,86.80797787610621,79.0,6.99787610619469,22.804424778761053,7.908726449838941,1.1007316814159291,413,13,90,7,10,145,57,113,0.055999999999999994,0.833,0.111,0.772,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,12,4,0,0,2,0,16,0,0,0,1,14,24,14,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,19,3,13,22,1,8,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,5,72,22,4,0.0,0.0,0.21830529042340646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30425620540561954,0.0,0.0,0.5054493770955049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21017963657846897,0.0,0.0,0.13636941632219146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775604457387514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20446370364450034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506322657739213,0.0,0.12713756886250704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994576273473068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23349148284662566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458865024945542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644500299096951,0.16587554769270935,0.17253625688838614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14331212304708701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15834062405990645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21979051701612853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518820404811608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nishashamaz,2020/01/15,im not fine My mom is ashamed of me. My grandma and her always compares me to my cousins because they dont have mental issues. I already tried committing suicide for about 5 times now. Yet no action. I used to go to a psychiatrist but then stoped bc the dr asked for the whole family to come but we cant bc theyre busy and then it just stoped. I’m scared. Im alone. I just took pills. My family said that i cant feel depressed bc im only 14. I started having these emotional issues since 2019. I still dont know the full cause but im guessing it was from when i was little and my surroundings. My older sister had these issues as well and when she’s mad im the victim. I got screamed at and she sometimes got really violence. Idk what to do. I just wish to not wake up in the morning. Im just done with life and family. Im really scared.,-0.8292948717948718,1.3216022500000015,1.7288888888888891,94.99807692307692,95.94444444444444,4.991452991452992,16.923076923076927,6.67199483983844,-0.034128205128205025,655,18,148,10,26,223,108,180,0.192,0.7390000000000001,0.069,-0.9723,0,1,0,0,0,1,17.0,1,0,1,0,11,9,2,3,6,0,12,4,1,2,1,25,26,14,1,1,9,3,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,9,0,0,2,0,0,4,7,7,1,0,8,3,22,2,16,18,2,20,0,1,0,0,10,6,0,1,10,88,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964188828398512,0.1027332215634442,0.0,0.07746293057524595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703174446296609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05675016506346797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563474363878798,0.0,0.08019354745529443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018303517775416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952690392907591,0.21821451278920606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047199299676142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632865136097941,0.0,0.0470718922461748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0529083295455976,0.0,0.14891398396426914,0.0,0.10255521123793973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7039139599959144,0.2915026084988153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05116286327161623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575611911471181,0.0,0.09330616836194053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381838811269318,0.0,0.0,0.1090323481614804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07080333819549035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927874823931085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855515841807406,0.0,0.18640971283160185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700957637396791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207384997426388,0.0,0.06589348839348187,0.0,0.07434620272862127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018313891399388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05428474651254465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343254842698686,0.06320574729980401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040463904053702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370405302792971,0.0,0.0,0.1039378237272488,0.10705525388432123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thereisnotypical,2020/01/15,"I'm pregnant and suicidal, I want to have my baby yet I want to die at the same time. How do I fix this? I feel like I'm going insane.  I just found out I'm pregnant awhile ago and my boyfriend and everyone around me is so happy, but it's for whatever reason driving me insane and I want to kill myself.  I don't want to get an abortion but at the same time, the idea of just blowing my brains out right now has a lot of appeal to me.  I'm autistic and I'm afraid I'll be a terrible mother due to my issues, also I've struggled with suicidal thoughts my whole life.  I don't have any idea how to eliminate these suicidal thoughts, I've been in a looney bin before for them, and some people think I need to go back.  I'm on loads of medications now but nothing is helping.",2.572272727272729,3.4286701818181835,4.361590909090912,88.28238636363638,74.45454545454545,7.4393939393939394,25.87121212121212,7.793537801064563,1.2588484848484849,600,20,135,8,12,204,94,165,0.225,0.718,0.055999999999999994,-0.9886,0,0,0,0,0,2,14.0,0,0,1,0,11,6,1,2,7,0,10,3,1,3,0,34,29,13,5,5,5,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,10,0,0,8,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,4,1,19,2,21,24,5,19,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,2,9,84,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671585703936042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431643829937342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721037044193727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725511136025966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991912521231137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163925614141798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15957860386682488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14835871991655986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365941041246473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227941996079408,0.1021229501795454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673643959746605,0.0,0.0,0.07468506659672584,0.0,0.16248267015274293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15217210110476614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958158478457957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3227445354445256,0.0,0.14920184462498065,0.0,0.0,0.15815213045844606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096926045862288,0.06983776746083006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12153031356171184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400629850617225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599503413230756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371636304057697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910298904561184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469756046623635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207785144275456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14944156066281447,0.0,0.4690897299609706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159608710707184,0.0,0.2269714236360905,0.16670967761931496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372606107689516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15959769732017298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trapped_artist,2020/01/15,"Extremely low on confidence and insecure due to premature ejaculation. Don't know how to deal with it. I recently broke off with my girlfriend of 8 years because I have been suffering from premature ejaculation for years and I felt I was making her entire experience horrible. I loved getting down on her and helping her orgasm and everything but everytime it came ro sex, I froze and couldn't do it anymore. And within a few in and outs, I came. It made me really insecure about myself. I live in a country where things like these are a taboo so I can't go to a doc and this fact is making me uneasy that I can't have a confident relationship. I thought I was making some self-progress. But recently, while trying to experiment with another girl, I got scared at the idea of sex. It's making me lose interest and I don't know what to do. I know it isn't a type 1 or permanent thing but I can't get past the psychological barrier no matter what I do. I blame frequent masturbation and the idea to come fast during my teenage years but now it is like I can't go for even past 30 seconds.",3.3292524321556587,5.128875138248851,5.153141321044547,79.58939452124937,74.1152073732719,9.430517153097801,28.184587813620077,9.861636050157227,2.8699976446492577,863,35,172,25,18,295,122,217,0.166,0.75,0.084,-0.9469,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,6,11,0,3,9,0,19,4,1,6,1,41,38,18,0,1,5,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,14,17,0,2,7,0,0,5,9,7,0,1,9,2,28,4,24,28,2,28,0,4,0,4,9,11,0,2,14,119,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13964244782019675,0.0,0.0,0.13207083426265367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118041185154845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046265688008017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471588149526454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729447887189122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795884645955622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196864017683986,0.2605355288458616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786599897536666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915374141621953,0.0,0.15136942696415093,0.0,0.10650980957636268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926238083648043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3006699443092837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21956353645399174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13012221957041753,0.0,0.1175933110575148,0.0,0.0,0.14898539788254844,0.0,0.0,0.1201929245100151,0.1260105612564321,0.35557336197699496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542554751455769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531338980578364,0.0,0.2629825573604633,0.1429768839747319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332839863878934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389274341026014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17694711155877466,0.0,0.0,0.10572368825775534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041504269537412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572751949248033
mentalhealth,alexisArtemissian,2020/01/15,"Scared, losing my mind and not sure what to do. I'm scared, terrified and a huge part of that is because I have a psych assessment next week. I don't know what to expect from it, and don't feel like I can be entirely honest answering some of the questions they have. I know white padded cells are a thing of the past but it feels like I might end up in one.

At a rough guess, I have some kind of dissociative disorder. I'm definitely depressed and suicidal. I don't want to be forced to stop transition (mtf transgender) because it's lead to the few moments that I've felt vaguely human. My mind is all over the place at the moment and I can't get them to be quiet. Them because they feel like other people. I'm just so lost at the moment and scared of what might happen because I have basically no control over my life it feels.

If I don't reply it's probably because I've fallen asleep. I can't do anything to myself physically for some reason despite how much I want to not exist at the moment.",3.9962090592334505,4.780174868292684,5.259250871080142,83.43689024390244,71.04878048780488,8.393728222996515,26.837979094076648,8.634040054169528,1.7660662020905922,788,25,164,13,14,263,109,205,0.251,0.7140000000000001,0.035,-0.9921,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,4,4,3,12,0,3,11,0,21,2,1,4,2,38,37,10,1,4,5,0,6,3,0,2,1,1,0,1,12,6,0,2,10,0,0,2,9,6,0,1,2,8,20,6,23,30,7,21,0,3,1,0,7,10,0,8,12,109,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172299959373048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3767668099400669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864253564545928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646773041610763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14167125343244952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948446334751462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500098691815161,0.2649275419130467,0.1186879037318652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458271157885727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13617370006813162,0.0,0.10931060323497112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287239593099634,0.13586898829766106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731154598469126,0.18117326255815994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13829137302359887,0.13493823563132562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26226780254952786,0.2496278650264825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086980766601953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146387064146556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376339518887753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386087656370554,0.11800263400433555,0.08569771776056752,0.0,0.12914931734342025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327576457986734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847489522821296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270947930767956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37127465321128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033460366558517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521260280075645,0.0,0.11650382751431355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212301124071841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582034765940288,0.0,0.09915492464697158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,silverfighty96,2020/01/15,"Killing the fucking bitch twitter.com  
/star\_shine0303",20.035,27.28676583333334,6.416666666666668,59.74500000000001,57.33333333333333,9.066666666666668,72.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,10.36486666666667,49,4,3,1,1,10,6,6,0.68,0.32,0.0,-0.8588,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6412169897605239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7673596106405732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Randomness998,2020/01/15,"I'm in a bad place mentally even though everything is great I recently moved to a new city to work as an illustrator, and everything is great, I have some casual friends here and in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend, I'm constantly feeling like I don't do enough or that I'm not working hard enough, and I think it's making me more and more clingy with my boyfriend, I don't want to be a burden and I genuinely don't know why I feel so strongly this way. I've considered therapy but I don't have the money for that right now. My anxiety is in the worst place it's been in years, and I don't know why. I have a chip on my shoulder and even though I have literally no free time cause seem to relax even when I do. I'm scared of the future of never been able to achieve anything I want to. I know it's all stupid but I can't help but feel so overwhelmed and lost, I don't know what advice I'm looking for, just thought I'd put it out into the world",3.235249653259362,3.7954352572815537,4.526241331484052,88.81941747572817,72.64077669902912,8.409986130374481,26.85020804438281,8.634040054169528,1.570714008321775,757,25,177,13,14,251,109,206,0.157,0.721,0.122,-0.8759999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,5,11,15,1,2,10,0,19,1,1,2,2,35,39,18,0,2,6,0,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,8,12,0,0,10,2,2,2,10,7,0,0,4,5,21,9,20,34,7,24,0,2,1,0,3,11,0,3,11,111,29,3,0.12560514524896355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273989423796533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608759231905614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336233228792817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487504975246252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12903108370032215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573453996878684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595673828278524,0.0,0.24888304147980755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257716109664977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905292063506503,0.08973234086295427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704222364231484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769602321241965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251753877824673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419048121755089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27611721188200244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061364329407691966,0.0,0.0,0.11115660098191772,0.1054766875449417,0.0,0.1371128535864711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384240979362045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265804437655064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349839145668413,0.0,0.0,0.09687443132758627,0.12131023197664982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26246128618551745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626786334911372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401992781572205,0.13485291958400386,0.0,0.107266107747761,0.0,0.0,0.1257526623889649,0.0,0.0,0.11434620683531616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364043018914233,0.0,0.0,0.08048270536205937,0.2468128349499026,0.09971645509680443,0.07324137028449182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817033796987408,0.09969951786035612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266782139132129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18288408338261075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088559541388263
mentalhealth,louis170305,2020/01/15,"I have a fear about something I know isn’t real Right so as a kid I was terrified of fnaf (a horror game) I eventually got Over it and forgot about it. But now it’s resurfaced in my brain and keeps me up at night. I know it’s very much not real and I’m completely safe, I just don’t know how to shake the fear of it. Please help",-1.5632432432432457,0.3831061891891885,1.1689729729729734,99.86183783783785,95.21621621621622,4.581621621621622,14.156756756756756,6.2581,-0.8492064864864859,254,5,65,3,10,87,52,74,0.205,0.688,0.106,-0.8228,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,3,4,0,4,1,1,1,0,15,11,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,3,3,1,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,0,8,1,10,8,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,41,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23898921462070324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22446362902383954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4818093860923511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17122301089863307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14349639406542036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902882282710568,0.0,0.0,0.35296589060419664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15737681322638647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20090389376458606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23500060141058146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4873502857129374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18282707789093586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16481278361249085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664221500846858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,4fingertakedown,2020/01/15,"Just about done Hey guys. 
This is a cry for help :( 
I’m just about done.",-3.161458333333332,-1.871412562499998,-1.709999999999999,116.82166666666667,112.125,2.1333333333333333,5.333333333333333,3.1291,-3.2532666666666668,53,0,16,0,3,16,13,16,0.29,0.58,0.13,-0.5106,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42045784936781583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7834187583177156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3790051632903612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256564479654076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JBWil,2020/01/15,"Why is this so for men hard? It's almost like there's a mental block. It's extremely hard for me to talk to anyone about these kinds of things. I just want to know why it's seems impossible. Hopefully, I get some responses from professionals. Yes depression, bad thoughts all that good shit...",2.082857142857144,4.860168714285717,2.9121428571428574,88.43285714285715,85.07142857142857,7.485714285714287,20.5,8.418075326091056,1.4125999999999994,232,7,47,6,7,73,45,56,0.209,0.607,0.184,-0.386,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,1,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,1,10,7,1,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,3,4,8,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,4,1,25,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363566309517113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16504232874870556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19708076133659666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20329803918408607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12331941873710375,0.0,0.0,0.19797636126213503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.422884990442948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344376731342681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24579587093150296,0.12971958169337044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531559495916875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378694483245716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148789206989332,0.0,0.0,0.2422882512244197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18971733553796286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15681227628202402,0.0,0.0,0.187386751516686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922054427401095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4259727655136292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,selfhelphelpstheself,2020/01/15,"How do y'all deal with mental health at work? Here's some context;
I work in hospitality, so very flexible shifts (ever-changing) and I find it really hard sometimes to endure those long shifts at night dealing with customers/coworkers when also coping with my mental health (namely, depression/anxiety).

What are your go-to techniques to get on top of your mental health at work? I'd love you to share your stories and tips to thrive! Thanks :)",5.904444444444442,7.704672222222222,5.69969135802469,78.24361111111115,67.51851851851852,8.362962962962964,28.314814814814817,8.841846274778883,2.314792592592592,354,12,60,6,6,110,61,81,0.02,0.777,0.203,0.9385,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,5,0,4,5,3,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,0,9,5,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,3,13,5,1,9,0,0,0,1,10,6,0,1,3,34,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278548424155601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230667585594035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16913033816888925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296555908310461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461932855104112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14612612539198264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352995914300046,0.0,0.09086268124114676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14321980404883142,0.0,0.0,0.5098303618531264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414875119401582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14429666024673754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4833600134528051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500352165670624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242231207442558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812400339811586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719471581394789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13191657208364604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3491805304770612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brotherfoundmyredd1t,2020/01/15,"I babble nonsense sometimes. Ok so this is so extremely wierd and I don't know what is going on. I find that sometimes I find a diary entry of mine (I don't have a real diary, I just sometimes write down my thoughts) or a text message to a friend or something like that. I recall writing them. I recall the emotion. But for some reason it seems like complete nonsense to me. Even right now I am having this sensation. Monday I had a talk with a friend of mine. I told him that I felt as though I was made of lead and no matter how much strength I put into it, I cannot do anything. Today I think back and I think ""Why did I say that, this isn't true. I feel pretty normal right now."". I have scars on my thighs and forearm and I think ""why would I cut myself, I'm not that anxious."" I know the immeasurable amount of anxiety, self hate or dispair I felt while I did it, but it doesn't make sense. Yesterday was split in twain as one half of the day I recall being numb. I didn't interact with anyone properly I was too invested in my own thoughts. But that doesn't make sense since I am very talkative. I remember craving the numbness and clarity that alcohol provides yet I am not addicted. I have been to one therapist and they told me that they where utterly shocked at what I had to say and another told me that it's all part of growing up. That especially made me question everything. I am at such a loss. I am feeling genuinely okay right now. Just another day. But I know that I have said and done these nonsensical things. So I guess I will just keep telling anonymous people about this until something happenes. Because apparently they are just as useful as ""professionals"". Or maybe I'm just that nut that tries to excuse himself with muh mental health idk.",2.652836538461539,4.719653339031343,3.916872329059832,86.51710336538461,76.86324786324786,7.122542735042735,26.06846509971509,8.07648339933343,1.6505704415954416,1386,53,278,24,32,453,182,351,0.085,0.83,0.084,-0.0694,1,0,3,0,0,1,41.0,0,0,4,3,20,14,2,0,11,2,33,7,2,8,2,64,62,28,0,2,15,0,4,2,2,2,5,3,0,1,26,13,1,1,18,0,1,4,10,6,0,3,20,7,55,8,30,39,6,29,0,1,0,0,23,13,0,8,14,203,81,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659100484543488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449352657010706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20505473176836692,0.0747988864440696,0.11045980832291763,0.0,0.06836772247465953,0.0,0.08046186993349852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518422536476706,0.0,0.059603751713442885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251698030007024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611572913962382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005948277884423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099855956059025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458056969411931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787536810633871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887764643451373,0.0,0.1877618770758608,0.0,0.17873221364598016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15108402846434887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05556873595489949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771202763392113,0.0,0.08646358812630409,0.0,0.0,0.09653422082092697,0.0,0.1039320300796122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690839862937147,0.0,0.0,0.1612065055306759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553748608543593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850373023515698,0.13053337560018005,0.0,0.098229809089595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853588804491603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187710423902917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580037859479948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251200683805028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058826074955502,0.0,0.06778603312513247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947402675958704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829256144565272,0.10953224986882927,0.0,0.0,0.11129125875969983,0.0,0.10053070348507807,0.0,0.0,0.11076190893899064,0.2505022309045069,0.0930080056928902,0.15551186806574002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901220994262211,0.10200239318297084,0.0,0.0,0.08088187346447348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15054651806424266,0.29011088621658965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858918522920462,0.08546112099851799,0.0,0.0,0.11352625231405356,0.06495847620880796,0.18795403008222628,0.09606508378863499,0.15524751159597594,0.0,0.0,0.0926808523181672,0.2802894006344136,0.0,0.06638394205033372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444765114993841,0.0,0.08067599439132593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17645647656088007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945774243029278,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ADAMMA091,2020/01/15,"just something im curious about a couple years off i tried to commit not alive, and got treatment, some pills and eventually my depression stopped being constant and transformed into something that comes and go during the day but even now, with a good place, gf and friends i have the thought of offing myself. i dont need to be in my depression attack (that's what i call them) like i could be laughing or cooking and id just go into suicidal mode, and its not a what if i drive into a wall sorta thing, its a ""i really want to die and nothing will remember me"" i reilize people will remember me and miss me but i always have those thoughts, and sometimes even casually looking at things will provoke thoughts of killing myself and idek if thats ok anymore.


this is the first time i really talk or vent about my mental health since i got my medication. qnd i apologize if there's bad grammar,English isn't my native language",6.0889848484848486,6.531139383333336,6.394040404040402,78.36590909090911,66.27777777777777,9.212121212121213,34.141414141414145,9.095868883498916,2.9679444444444445,739,32,137,12,11,238,114,180,0.209,0.6579999999999999,0.132,-0.9672,0,0,2,0,0,2,15.0,0,0,1,1,8,12,2,0,8,1,12,4,0,1,1,40,24,18,3,6,11,0,0,1,2,3,3,0,0,0,11,16,1,1,5,2,0,4,4,6,0,1,5,1,23,6,15,12,1,19,0,3,1,0,6,8,0,7,8,97,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341753832815188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517895776361105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15506778980058294,0.0,0.0,0.11380984367040672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391836991590863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741557767874887,0.0,0.14729839757868127,0.0,0.10882927566639106,0.15082003243167108,0.0,0.08790611467643357,0.0,0.23480037220400785,0.0,0.1414641418371323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974965499134927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18005769792967147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594184165296235,0.0,0.0,0.10530970262449074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15493171894103114,0.1143270331049587,0.21803277204261207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448869386405894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14723390538395564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508024295949793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659224241907719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114462737788406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13731398766971747,0.1373644212869108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106919600652843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078931442338462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944974404383988,0.0,0.14241079275200175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746422695307776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088163272066429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112753758670994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20987008633065368,0.13481015152573736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395794658985152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909667624269696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955762578096052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111134266197645,0.0,0.0,0.32463529293347404,0.07948114372254363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254284873681004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039682956406292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777661599178976
mentalhealth,Revolutionary-Growth,2020/01/15,"Am I manic for real??? It's not just happiness? Do not respond to this post, it's babbling. I have like 1000 thoughts. I will be writing what I will be thinking as fast as it's possible, without analyzing anthing. I will not focus on grammar, and I will probably do 1000 mistakes, and I will be thinking later like, I have written so much crap, but.... What's more, english is my second language.

I think like I have discovered something very important about myself. My whole life I was thinking I have psychopathic traits, but actually manic episodes have symptoms of: inflated self-esteem or grandiosity, increase in goal-directed activity, charm, confidence, idealizing people, lack of empathy etc. I can just make fun of people when they are in need. I have like 1000 thoughts rn and plenty of ideas. I am writing so fast rn. Being kinda bipolar makes much more sense than being psychopathic. I've never thought I am psychopathic. I am feeling so great rn, I feel like I am awesome and super confident.

“Stimulants can trigger mania and should be avoided,” Fiedorowicz says. “Caffeine is an underappreciated trigger and can also impair sleep,” and sleep deprivation is a notorioustrigger for bipolar mood swings and mania, he says.

Omg yes, I realized distrubed sleeping patterns can induce this state. I was sleeping much less recently on purpose, and after some time I realized I was feeling much better. I didnt want to sleep, I started listening loud music and dancing. Generally speaking I am feeling much better when I sleep less. I realized that most of my life I was focused on trigger this state. I was calling this need for stimulation, I knew after certain things I could be extremely happy. My triggers: stressful situations, adrenaline rushes, strong interest in something, extremely good circumstances, and recently I discovered sleeping less can induce this state.

Yes, so it makes much more sense. I feel like I understand myself more. I feel like it's more like bipolar2, it's not so severe to induce depression or full blown mania. I thought, I dont have this, because I thought people with bipolar these states changeable without triggers. But I've found out they have triggers as well. And I always had some type of triggers too, I was not aware immediately what triggers these wonderful episodes.

I wonder what is so bad about manic episodes, it feels so good. They say, its better to avoid these things, but I am trying to induce them as often as it's possible. I can admit, there are bad things about this tho, for example I can't focus on things, I am dancing and I am unproductive. I've been ""sitting dancing"" for many hours. I am listening music on the full volume. I am writing so much, because I have so much energy to write these things. 

So yeah, there are negatives about it. Also I am overusing my body in these states, because I dont want to sleep, and it's kinda normal to stay awake for 24 hours+, I have a lot  motivation to do things. I know it's mumbling, but I am trying to write as much what come to my mind. It will be very interesting to see what I was writing about later. Now I am thinking, like I dont have much to write. 

I think, its awesome, because I realized I can trigger this state more often by disturbed sleeping patterns. I know sleeping less is unhealthy to my body, but I just feel awesome. I think in addition with coffee, it will be very cool. Of course I will not be constantly like that, so sooner or later, I will be too tired, and my body will want to rest. So I will be sleeping then.

Omg, I have found so cool music rn, I will be listening for hours rn. Omg I fucking love thatm, sdFsdfsdsdffsdsdffsdsdf. I want to write much faster, than I am able to. 

 am feeling so good right now. I am drinking 3rd coffee after a long break, and it's so awesome. I am sure I will be awake for 24h+. Fuck this stupid sleep, I will not think about it, because I am feeling sooo good rn. I will never go sleep again haha, of course I am kidding. Ok time to dance. I dont care if I have bipolar 2 or something. I just know I have figured out how to induce better mood more often. I know, I am unproductive and I am wasting my time for listening loud music and dancing, but I am so fucking happy and I fuck this shit.

I have found new tracks. I want to listen them for hours. I was never writing so fast in my whole life. What's more, english is my second language, so it's not easy to express everything that fast. I want to hear music more louder, but it's on full volume already, and I cant listen louder. I am happy, everythings seems to be good. So yeah, I think, I expressed myself. But writing gives me so much pleasure, so I want to write more and more. Thinking is very cool. Breathing is cool.

I feel like I can write total crap, but I dont care. Even if I will write one sentence that can change my life, its worth it. But I don't care at this point, because I just want to write something, in meantime I enjoy listen good, cool music. I have so much thoughts going through my mind, I feel like I can write for hours. 

Most of the time, I was not serious, when I was saying my ""manic episodes"", but from wikipedia: Hypnomania:

* [pressured speech](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Pressured_speech)
* inflated [self-esteem](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-esteem) or [grandiosity](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Grandiosity)
* decreased need for sleep
* [flight of ideas](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glossary_of_psychiatry#F) or the subjective experience that thoughts are racing
* easily distracted
* increase in goal-directed activity (e.g., social activity, at work, or [hypersexuality](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypersexuality)), or [psychomotor agitation](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psychomotor_agitation)
* involvement in pleasurable activities that may have a high potential for negative psycho-social or physical consequences (e.g., the person engages in unrestrained buying sprees, sexual indiscretions, reckless driving, physical and verbal conflicts, foolish business investments, quitting a job to pursue some grandiose goal, etc)

I have all symptoms for 100%, maybe - the last one. So clearly I can have the hypmnomanic episode. But I dont know, maybe its simple euphoria, because recently everything seems to be good for me. So I am not sure about this all. But whatever. I just know I like these things. 

But maybe I have full blown mania, lets see symptoms. 

""To be classed as a manic episode, while the disturbed mood and an increase in goal directed activity or energy is present at least three (or four if only irritability is present) of the following must have been consistently present:

1. Inflated self-esteem or grandiosity.
2. Decreased need for sleep (e.g., feels rested after 3 hours of sleep).
3. More talkative than usual or pressure to keep talking.
4. [Flights of ideas or subjective experience that thoughts are racing](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Racing_thoughts).
5. Increase in goal directed activity, or psychomotor acceleration.
6. Distractibility (too easily drawn to unimportant or irrelevant external stimuli).
7. Excessive involvement in activities with a high likelihood of painful consequences.(e.g., extravagant shopping, improbable commercial schemes, [hypersexuality](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hypersexuality)).[\[15\]](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mania#cite_note-DSMIV-15)

I have all symptoms. It's sick, so it means I have this for real??? WTF, it's impossible. I dont have depression, maybe I am too apathetic at times, but everyone is apathetic from time to time. But tbh, hm...  I dont know. 

I dont care about this shit, I've never had depression. I can only feel good thanks to euphoria from time to time, and that's it. Euphoric state can be very similar to that. Also in the past I was thinking, I had NPD, but inflated self-esteem, it's a sign of this state. I always knew, I am not NPD. I don't care about some stupid supply.

Making breaks from coffee is very good. It triggers these plesant vibes. Okay, I got bored. Enough of writing. I want to focus on music and other things. I dont even care what I was writing. I doubt I have some type of bipolar, because my episodes dont last so long. I am tired a bit of dancing that much.",4.989917982706963,7.882681164713997,5.208517969998682,76.04912762535987,72.98345968297727,7.8930177769305585,30.41483251951455,8.760231419513293,2.8916005210395372,6554,292,1061,137,141,2064,442,1451,0.124,0.67,0.20600000000000002,0.9993,1,2,5,0,0,0,390.0,0,0,5,13,65,95,10,10,20,13,158,47,24,23,13,244,258,105,0,23,56,0,14,13,0,19,17,15,0,2,77,32,1,4,65,8,4,16,35,30,2,6,33,36,160,62,131,186,60,118,0,4,2,5,49,35,8,38,67,744,237,9,0.027317643953466357,0.0,0.026658079881068063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03014569939889933,0.06553772999998238,0.04546093628022862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04561818328478835,0.13322065760663138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664094452820847,0.029823791989432087,0.0910312323309081,0.0,0.0,0.02789436877218474,0.0,0.16711295181653876,0.0,0.028898445112443088,0.02353173139640834,0.0,0.02952066834288752,0.0,0.021810915839923502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705859401245543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35217682788493265,0.02676089113872627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028226428670456383,0.0609327882023513,0.03608609238485678,0.0,0.0,0.02610317946945016,0.07365401080057504,0.053443795262777885,0.0,0.0,0.1933767022072728,0.0975786514933986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898571597603175,0.0,0.1010188865773178,0.0,0.026205573290853348,0.031050493188213762,0.2062146930419595,0.02184841538385449,0.030117798898451682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632055983196073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03078897012144481,0.0,0.0,0.057725181359131676,0.0,0.0,0.16141425944300214,0.0,0.0,0.061676589816826576,0.0,0.0,0.02710854644220397,0.0242811771157621,0.0,0.0,0.10509143889101608,0.04453505171888877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027934141769423063,0.07718103921217533,0.17349827258619427,0.0,0.0,0.04835051052538969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02322448400104479,0.024655240220031897,0.0,0.07293895785568208,0.027695803295053414,0.10977698036865573,0.029756922707069595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055166066016167685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811425611987506,0.0810227474035425,0.08427620438497492,0.026383550757271817,0.0,0.0,0.026765490989397303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0370222850581023,0.0415525984135857,0.02906789920359436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026077782209427004,0.056815844115553765,0.023852713009519647,0.0,0.0,0.02582400337887461,0.06159307801221134,0.026162751613169995,0.0,0.029453040534510026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029055676939771125,0.0,0.062186918824830864,0.0,0.0,0.08091863333677686,0.0,0.0,0.02332911867518957,0.0,0.08689634768695705,0.0,0.0,0.043537250807254284,0.04973791415256317,0.14249130200117874,0.030861162009208368,0.05608233790628248,0.0,0.030706176368110218,0.4373979588676213,0.02784689781853617,0.0,0.08412182773883868,0.0,0.0,0.019335568993405286,0.029116973726210832,0.0,0.0,0.031292268852011154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051493112270210716,0.11357396722683087,0.0,0.021956887435834613,0.0,0.02515041631113749,0.0,0.0,0.14518903036954892,0.1925444752798994,0.0,0.17349726310889618,0.14336224084745633,0.06279522627348802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0370937741343192,0.0,0.0,0.028438630764016364,0.0,0.0,0.030086525407075487,0.13523950318035094,0.14501388761553444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02456184263131661,0.0,0.0,0.060998347809475315,0.0,0.05266646787748756,0.059249639149722075,0.019887570149692727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Strict-Experience,2020/01/15,"Why do I compulsively repeat certain death related soundbites? When I remember embarrassing/humiliating stuff occasionally random death related soundbites will just pop-out:

""Kill."" , ""Kill Everybody!"" , ""I just want to die"" , ""Just kill me..."" , ""Persons name! I just want you to die!""

It started years ago at this point with the just kill me thing. It happens pretty often, and sometimes multiple times in a day. It only happens when I'm off guard, and think of something embarrassing, that is for sure a trigger. It just pops out. 

I am not overly obsessed with death, or murder or anything like that. So why those phrases? And why won't it freaking stop? afaik I don't have tourettes syndrome or anything like that.  It seems to be getting worse, so far its just been seen as a quirk by the few people that have heard that, but once it happened when I was face to face with somebody from work and the idea of that happening more is pretty terrifying.",4.263720930232559,6.812294616279075,4.518779069767444,81.8121220930233,73.76744186046511,7.090697674418602,29.3546511627907,8.07648339933343,2.1758883720930244,742,32,132,12,16,232,107,172,0.17,0.725,0.105,-0.9527,0,0,1,0,0,3,40.0,0,1,0,1,13,12,5,2,6,0,12,2,2,1,2,34,25,14,10,2,12,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,1,18,8,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,4,2,10,4,18,18,2,17,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,6,12,88,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611472275278884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970204603099132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720234139458011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24847789060866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254296282132564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42343276254381423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351367843727537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.529760674582282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696744992977125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274860785015615,0.0,0.09104401765112503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299108298088698,0.10452519973123522,0.0,0.0,0.1131636099407092,0.0,0.0,0.24357398799272856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13560685516009469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089784924871402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215776463928273,0.11839516943563885,0.0,0.08473058012923564,0.0,0.0,0.10008200600877676,0.0,0.0,0.13703805778931047,0.0,0.0,0.11282422763982028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952927824239926,0.07670463362440975,0.0,0.0,0.06980322602910481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121482915933314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3240560056467455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714950962751915,0.0,0.1219936026985556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708861094819626
mentalhealth,JCwolf15,2020/01/15,"I've been clean over a year... But I'm considering doing it again



I feel so worthless and unimportant, like everyone would rather be with someone else than me


I miss having the release of... well


I do have items I can use, I can access



I wish I wasn't alive anymore so no one would have to put up with me",-0.061875000000000575,2.182736562500004,1.9112500000000023,95.60875,89.625,5.075,18.9375,6.6274283507984215,0.029162499999999536,236,7,54,3,8,78,50,64,0.18899999999999997,0.6609999999999999,0.15,-0.3781,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,12,0,0,1,0,10,17,4,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,1,1,2,1,9,2,7,12,1,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,41,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3048034672068611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567471525631021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2936811385663212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15540277148147447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501531504179007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082647985643913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30896642498027266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604122615945846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26544723720730395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763398963599055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3534313655433801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43665787217792135,0.0,0.0,0.1979199820490466
mentalhealth,ProbableZebra,2020/01/15,"I have long vivid dreams every night and I resent it. Hello, hoping to get some new perspectives on whatever the hell is wrong with me.

For 4 years I have dreamt every time I sleep, without fail, and it's never fun. Often quite stressful and disturbing most of the time. 

I have been to the doctors about this. Reddit is a last ditch effort. Every time I saw a GP it resulted in being sent to a cognitive behavioural therapist, who also doesn't have the foggiest clue what to do. At least I haven't had to pay! 🇬🇧

While some dreams have loose reoccurring themes, I highly doubt these are night terrors. My dreams aren't consistent in terms of narrative (if any) and can range from nonsensical grotesque imagery and sensations, to being highly convincing depictions of my real life. The more realistic dreams often give me false memories, which is a whole other pain in the ass.

I have no idea how to deconstruct something this complex cohesively, so have some disjointed paragraphs:

- I cannot lucid dream. I can be aware I'm dreaming but cannot control anything other than myself. I can wish all I like for something to happen, but it wont. 

- When I realise I'm dreaming, my brain does something I've named a ""jump-cut"" where the scenario suddenly changes and all memories before the cut are erased and replaced with new ones that give me a reason to believe whatever is happening in the new scenario is real.

- I can feel pain in my dreams. Boy do I feel it. Sensations that aren't physically possible as well. An example being your gums suddenly swelling so strongly that they shatter your teeth into bits you have to spit out to avoid cutting your mouth or swallowing them) 

- A reoccurring theme where family members molest or make inappropriate advances on me. This has never happened to me in real life and I know for a fact that none of them would ever do something like that. Makes me sick to my stomach.

- The only connection I can make between most dreams is that I usually have some form of responsibility that I'm desperately trying to fore-fill, but I lack control over the situation and I'm often subjected to lots of stressful things in the process. 

- Because the dreams are so bloody long and I spend a lot of time sleeping (I currently have 0 control over my sleep cycle thanks to horrid chronic pain that keeps me awake and also exhausts me at the same time) I experience more time in a world of fiction which has only a negative impact on me as a whole, than reality. I probably shouldn't have to tell y'all how shitty that is. 

I've tried lots of shit to try and get this to change, but nothing ever makes a difference. I do have physical health issues (getting checked out by multiple doctors for multiple things atm, so I can't confirm exactly what I have). If anyone can relate, or has any ideas I'd love to hear them. 

There's a ton of other intricacies and details I've left out, so I can go in to it a lot more if people want me to. Just trying to keep the original post short, or else I'd be writing a whole biography about it.

Thanks.",5.6185128205128185,6.630605073504277,6.2757264957264995,76.78538461538463,67.4957264957265,9.487179487179487,31.75213675213676,9.661875296680813,3.010829059829061,2428,98,444,51,39,794,282,585,0.147,0.7559999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.9845,1,1,4,0,0,0,65.0,0,5,4,8,22,28,6,6,32,0,54,23,10,12,8,87,85,37,0,9,13,0,2,2,0,3,11,2,0,1,31,19,1,6,7,10,4,3,15,18,1,1,4,6,54,10,69,73,26,58,1,1,2,2,20,27,3,22,29,314,85,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076735147788338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156147981994302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04707256413716118,0.0,0.05539963005853212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04103839244296025,0.0,0.05728540198886298,0.07584796431987041,0.0,0.0,0.07349733903361874,0.0,0.0,0.07515274888482247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243385406699904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265194267514115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703363490234555,0.0,0.13781224794774122,0.05891325556553401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056238243010320516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179180010588672,0.17016310073890925,0.0,0.0,0.06585307363100497,0.06346445723035134,0.0,0.06807926584427841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551768067993797,0.12916130218522684,0.03826020222082888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17859580443592096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715593115397585,0.07587591062577279,0.0,0.0,0.14225713573353085,0.0,0.06686516415787194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519949318923298,0.0,0.07026586578994723,0.0,0.11967639173750118,0.0,0.0,0.036997983337985305,0.05487578166154656,0.0,0.0,0.07314470533235183,0.0,0.09510194089259896,0.06577949767050832,0.0,0.0,0.11915432704842932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289363840936777,0.060760031791031274,0.0,0.17974975536905144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038445541791582,0.1950577688717464,0.0,0.12635281388773628,0.0,0.06459652874653586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04561860271958055,0.1024016467930466,0.2149035820312848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04667205921726034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589456328007718,0.06447512194448239,0.0,0.07258366429402595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160440696643691,0.0,0.2298788694246668,0.0,0.06921742916489976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910426756524769,0.0,0.07567187484920705,0.20210952354057876,0.0,0.0,0.20730866469427894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423246606349514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05884171585396175,0.12396067375411753,0.0,0.07816512821946893,0.08945045781581301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355332776801923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828267642526869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414481562139942,0.0,0.039707801321242985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06052986406973136,0.0,0.0,0.2254852225548083,0.07741608358446317,0.06489525622138374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04782306499363405,0.07360518864872702,0.0,0.04335266014035701
mentalhealth,GayMary,2020/01/15,"I am very confused about labels surrounding self-harm So while I would generally describe myself as a relatively happy and healthy person, I have throughout my life struggled with self-harm; this has included major stuff like cutting and hitting, and minor stuff like wearing inadequate clothes for the weather, skipping meals despite hunger, and seeking out risky situations like by flirting with creeps (even when I was a minor, \*sigh\*). The thing is, other then stuff associated with gender dysphoria (I'm trans), I don't really have any symptoms associated with common mental disorders other then self-harm itself, like I still find enjoyment in my daily life, I am not at all anxious about normal things, I don't have compulsions, I haven't experienced any significant trauma (outside of the consequences of some of my self harm), like the only abnormal aspects of psychology seem to be my self-harm behavior and me being trans. What confuses is when researching self-harm all the information I found seems to view it as a the result of some more fundamental underlying problem, and when I have tried to get therapy for self-harm, my therapists have seemingly always tried to find the secret cause of my self-harm rather then just helping me end the behavior, but I don't think such a cause exists for me, like my problem has always simply been my desire to hurt myself (or sometimes just comfort with not caring for myself), it hasn't been more complicated then that. Is there a name for this, like I really wish there was a way I could describe this to people so that they would easily understand it?",15.799705768486257,9.843381459930317,13.991614401858303,51.54722028648861,53.21602787456446,17.215485869144413,50.70421989934185,13.90115768025156,6.730341385985287,1297,54,204,32,9,417,153,287,0.092,0.767,0.142,0.9112,0,0,0,0,0,2,42.0,0,0,1,0,15,22,1,3,14,0,26,6,1,3,2,48,37,20,0,9,7,0,0,7,0,2,3,0,0,2,17,12,2,0,10,0,0,0,7,9,1,0,5,2,29,12,31,26,7,17,0,1,1,0,7,5,0,8,18,151,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354124693083949,0.0,0.0,0.11066857830069096,0.0,0.0,0.0919247709205411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296198637955304,0.16717850320966215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496720510893036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325689910140153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206953636814259,0.0,0.0,0.05374401934226671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14874113983157386,0.0,0.0,0.08921784198180867,0.0,0.0,0.04251238886847388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661971973634351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054540496099143417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710810870898207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494786467974785,0.2782723942421593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200167168044695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972517778306648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061885438551898625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564116094464306,0.07104901554190532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15571991684163938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042552206271739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22222816965749706,0.6790920077847835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146312208341467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804768635214146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498206832883671,0.0,0.0,0.0850654358295466,0.2794470363914276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457443142248093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305351637278714,0.09447666889778353,0.10811702709795844,0.052138515119127635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048957550134232,0.0,0.0,0.08470888482734468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713864903268021,0.0,0.06458760047823152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357131322853418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560561544515932,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymousgoodboy,2020/01/15,"I started talking to myself a lot recently and it kind of scares me because I don't know where it came from. How should I feel about this? My entire life I have had what I can only explain as ""silent thoughts,"" where I don't have any kind of words behind my thoughts. When I'm doing tasks I just do them without any internal dialogue. 

Recently, however, I began talking to myself gradually, and it's getting worse. I started with internal dialogue when doing things like math, telling myself each step in my head. I didn't really pay any attention to it because I know this is normal to most. But then I started speaking my internal thoughts. When doing the dishes, for example, I'd say things like ""white plate goes there, then the cup goes here"" or things like that. This is where I began to pay lots of attention to what I'm saying, because I have never really talked to myself or spoken out loud when I'm not in the presence of any people or animals. About a week ago, it got worse. I'm now narrating many of my internal thoughts. I was walking around my campus looking for a building, and almost every ten seconds it was ""no... That's not right"" ""I can't find this street, maybe I should pull up Google maps"" ""found it! Finally! Now to find the room."" When I drive I make up conversations like ""should I go to the grocery store?"" ""Yup, we need eggs, bread, and milk. Let's stop real quick.""

I just want to know what extent you guys do things like this. I'm not sure whether or not it's completely normal, but especially when I do it in public I feel like I look like I'm completely out of my mind. I've been alive nineteen years and I've never experienced what I've developed in the last few months. I haven't changed anything in my life, so I have no idea what could've caused something like this. I don't do any drugs or alcohol, and I haven't had any lifestyle changes. This just happened out of nowhere and I haven't heard of this happening to anyone before, so I'd like to anonymously ask for an opinion on this.",2.572954820492136,4.658983251243782,3.676153018690332,88.0579084308189,77.18407960199005,7.032513110125049,25.29272556138228,8.00916892397051,1.4851377437138629,1585,58,323,27,37,512,188,402,0.033,0.8859999999999999,0.08,0.9383,1,0,3,0,0,0,60.0,1,1,1,0,23,13,0,1,10,1,31,9,1,3,3,69,66,27,0,7,16,0,2,9,0,3,4,5,1,1,29,15,5,1,16,0,3,6,17,1,0,2,16,11,45,12,42,46,6,52,0,0,3,0,16,19,0,10,36,209,74,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210595893829433,0.08693128755375014,0.08145360047550773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318975451013414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056877151503276366,0.0,0.06693863420915871,0.07241281437713637,0.07604503814256734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487584269444852,0.0,0.06921718728456637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093035105691856,0.0,0.08356201260404368,0.17210092641987154,0.0,0.17057387928482493,0.0,0.0,0.06494603442349962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943324443717432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685352684619225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225926903777905,0.0581116951291777,0.0,0.08910764800146527,0.14869266996317326,0.0,0.0,0.08918876880767045,0.0,0.0,0.042498535472593066,0.0,0.04622929211842403,0.0,0.06505769624865551,0.0,0.0,0.08054269091879705,0.14386328587147149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348172976840515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918267246264734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941313293194193,0.13411250962441354,0.06630567517694455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317907172091639,0.1149104069334897,0.35766220420051376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366158299427069,0.0,0.0,0.13831038994143965,0.0,0.0,0.054297308082753216,0.08246937484828337,0.08172031378985369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821335804693024,0.0,0.06492747432961375,0.0,0.0,0.060315052570202386,0.12547398997913115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939839591489272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06186527211330658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05639322674955715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258652411321684,0.1042212472635867,0.0,0.1606334609319271,0.0,0.0,0.06946676405836258,0.0,0.1293749705324913,0.0814388692878389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06262207373811822,0.0,0.0,0.17272569460082635,0.0,0.0,0.06800667078538188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666513104307053,0.0,0.0,0.19614207551482926,0.0710976605732945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161635905961188,0.0,0.0,0.2583100889699472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04797840680676666,0.0,0.06524871717791346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841207267130144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657916164453336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052382441111308464
mentalhealth,Marinta,2020/01/15,"Finally got my diagnosis, and now I don't know how to work with it. I've been diagnosed with agoraphobia, an illness I used claim will never happen to me. Because, regardless of how 'scared' or 'anxious' I've get, *of course* ***I*** *wouldn't get it*.

So hearing my doctor say this, and getting a new round of anxiety and anti-depressives to work through this is. . . Interesting. I know I have therapy to do next, as well as learning how to cope with this, but. . . What if I can't?

It took two doses of my ""intense panic"" drug (I call it that because when I panic in a bad/painful way I'd usually take it) before I headed to my doctors app. today, and now my body is aching and sore.  
I had a good life a year ago - a good paying job, a place of my own - and now I'm back at my parents' home, scared of leaving it, and unable to get a job.

The diagnosis makes sense, but. I don't know what to do now.

Sorry if this doesn't belong here, I just needed someplace to let it out you know?",-0.06047854785478535,2.1074911287128733,2.5885396039603954,91.49505363036306,88.20792079207922,5.5448844884488455,20.792904290429046,6.996647511020387,0.5363260726072611,736,25,164,11,24,255,115,202,0.127,0.81,0.063,-0.9295,3,0,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,1,0,2,13,8,0,4,9,0,14,10,2,5,1,31,31,19,0,5,6,1,1,0,0,2,8,2,1,0,14,11,0,0,5,0,1,1,6,4,1,1,4,3,21,4,24,24,1,20,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,3,14,110,35,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617408418598263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162821468826388,0.13531264317691233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210025269620684,0.10000785056881094,0.14602852041945946,0.0,0.1019204456618842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330439929068065,0.0,0.0,0.12230455765695453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316278355009048,0.1215699894137448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451913618626709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389019858783936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13120861382092985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25031179944001475,0.0,0.0,0.2009246383967966,0.09579570704221516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591740856300873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292460061459345,0.0,0.13499611345109375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12014496613272425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23771814364502564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633027486570858,0.0,0.0,0.12682535479916793,0.0,0.1224789447841074,0.08460124100175004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995132502688061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881229184887286,0.09237853688760993,0.11568028411546685,0.1273829993241855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12744997325974994,0.2810623586554088,0.13299693198927245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12514029385870604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525058133288793,0.23983308705949746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13407928316630222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09005654989434611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697414887431952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353352218752988,0.0,0.13307540157032954,0.0,0.0,0.11700362340275687,0.0,0.0,0.10344789711905744,0.13191620184703282,0.0,0.0,0.09507251255179383,0.0,0.0,0.10769289395995983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743965235345468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713173493994871
mentalhealth,boopsnoopydoop,2020/01/15,Is it bad if I can't sleep because of wierd noises that I hear I hear crying screening mumbling Creek's with no one there everythings like I'm dreaming but when I open my eyes it stops but it keeps me up this might not fit here but the noises are getting louder and more wierd and vivid each night to the point where I don't care if this fits here or not,3.7085526315789465,4.1473727500000015,3.8458947368421086,94.56226315789476,71.5,6.606315789473682,23.094736842105263,5.6839178017228535,0.1052557894736843,283,6,66,1,5,87,57,76,0.184,0.7929999999999999,0.023,-0.8795,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,5,2,2,0,0,16,11,9,0,2,8,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,6,5,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,1,0,5,7,2,4,10,2,9,0,0,3,0,2,6,0,4,4,43,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21163815979030728,0.15451390647182847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25843114194752864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784265995857554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278038884874083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324284251335726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5713617254472448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252971632053564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238333977744332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268893262653337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378658824738037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717588846538239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23961254745303065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25365460778237503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119135685626947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dargombres,2020/01/15,"So this is what we call nervous breakdown, and I'm experiencing it at the moment I dont know where to start. I've been living overseas for almost 4 years (english is not my native language and pardon me for any mistakes that I make) and have been trying my luck to apply permanent residence (PR). the process is getting more and more demanding, and doors are closed one by one, to the point that its not possible for me to get PR. this burdens me a lot for the past 2 years. going back to my home country is the last thing I wanna do, because being a minority in a country where the conservatives are growing bigger is not ideal. religion and race tolerance is something that they have chucked out to some extent. I'm currently considering to migrate to another country with a chance of PR. I've spent a fortune for PR, and sacrifice everything at all cost for it. 

Work also gets more demanding. the company has just been acquired by another company, thus new upper management employees are coming in, bringing new responsibilities for us. management wise, this company is not doing the best, so the old employees start to leave us. 

to put the cherry on top, I have a medical condition which barricades me from eating like a normal people do. it has been 4 years. I need to see functional medicine practitioner once in every fortnight and it costs an arm and a leg. I used to eat something that I like when in stress, but it seems impossible now because of this issue.

Although money is not really an issue, my paycheck is only enough to get by. it will be minus if there are extra unexpected expense.

I know that there are people having more serious problems out there than I do. but this time my body cant lie, I feel so weak, I feel like there's a big rock sitting on top of my chest, and I cant function at all. my motivation is a big zero and cant really concentrate at work. I just need break from everything.

thanks for anyone who by any chance read my post.",5.83325396825397,6.524469640211643,6.878955026455031,73.79636904761905,66.88359788359789,10.215343915343917,32.945767195767196,10.222266870305534,3.4432148148148163,1556,65,282,37,24,523,197,378,0.07200000000000001,0.848,0.08,0.2993,3,0,2,0,0,0,41.0,3,0,1,8,15,15,0,2,22,0,36,8,4,4,2,50,59,20,0,8,10,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,21,17,2,1,6,2,5,5,9,7,0,3,5,4,29,8,45,51,12,46,1,0,1,0,6,22,0,6,19,202,50,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064491238038993,0.0,0.0,0.08501208768606396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14458212062840356,0.22294016894421287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433094309693453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174200010022246,0.0,0.12960510944672365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11156056208982396,0.0,0.0,0.11808091468971693,0.0,0.0,0.10854931307549154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157236356264896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458869406493772,0.0,0.0,0.217553153166676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984150484909594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956656593259314,0.0,0.19108019837154788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750202646295264,0.07594432895719985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22215994566706804,0.0,0.06041559380251658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663260464720574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22190964811140146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684491994886124,0.0866527812718853,0.0,0.11256166906403392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15580579222467528,0.0,0.09386928202385757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037672820042472,0.0,0.0,0.07095942765669908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709112580897577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764765365319228,0.0,0.20534010535130048,0.0,0.0,0.10415635086621754,0.0,0.0,0.11154923815900614,0.11321137900888367,0.14407006820492693,0.08084975951838354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148017216250013,0.14739703440782878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049260660923216,0.11984293968138883,0.10181082565331988,0.0,0.0,0.10171954924671836,0.0,0.10686590875360497,0.0,0.0,0.10633378964820184,0.0,0.13620343837709512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471133917601636,0.09677609949095184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16367759905739895,0.0,0.0,0.15048648344040158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217720435332644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787138172701476,0.0,0.0,0.07062433300348908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061987313210257425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217413189275804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557437049465696,0.0918134073373944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547826442046938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053708464618997
mentalhealth,kineticfeelings,2020/01/15,"what to do? sorry it’s kinda long... so i’ve never been professionally diagnosed but i want to know some opinions of what you guys think and what i should do. i’m not sure if it anything serious but it’s been weighing me down lately as a whole bunch of stuff related to depression has resurfaced around me concerning friends and their mental health. we all have our problems and here’s mine. 

i’ve never known what to call it so I figured it was probably nothing. sometimes I get really worked up over nothing for awhile but then im fine for a while and then it happens again. I think nobody would really care if I just suddenly disappear, I mean when I’m gone for a day or two at school nobody seems to notice and just go on with their daily lives. sometimes i cry a bit and other times a lot so it’s kinda just happens on a random basis. i’ve tried self harm but with flimsy and really thin blades it doesn’t really do much, they only been like paper-cuts really. it doesn’t really scare me even with the thoughts of a bigger better blade. feelings of sadness and loneliness kinda just spring upon me at random and I’m not sure why most of the times. I’ve been thinking of trying to get into self harm to see if it helps anything but to do that I’d have to go to the store and buy a proper blade and I really don’t feel like doing much anymore. after school I have little to no energy and just want to sleep and I know for a fact that I’ve been getting my recommended amount of sleep and sometimes even more, and these naps can last multiple hours. I don’t want to say I have mental issues because I don’t know if I do but even if I did I would feel like a copy cat since some of my friends do.

so what do you guys think? what should I do?",2.129454419889502,3.9336767071823218,3.6533667127071823,89.0185583563536,77.50828729281768,6.734944751381216,20.981008287292816,7.645422480735847,0.7018367403314918,1376,35,292,20,32,455,171,362,0.126,0.764,0.11,-0.8502,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,2,2,3,2,16,17,0,1,13,0,31,5,2,0,6,79,60,36,0,13,19,0,4,3,2,4,2,1,0,4,21,21,1,0,15,1,2,4,10,7,0,1,9,6,32,10,40,47,12,34,0,2,1,0,16,13,0,17,20,198,53,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489923825938543,0.0,0.0,0.14089469550522066,0.0762084672990441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052185292583773565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571252171218458,0.09346077936481494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741441887274863,0.0,0.08728214219183808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403537774858432,0.055209496343523436,0.0,0.0737332683759846,0.08688940281993188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16962804326062078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12985656340864826,0.12231545634669452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13227966367038269,0.0,0.13417852677093198,0.0,0.09730497362845897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952897301006395,0.15140414871557206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909963423880726,0.0,0.0,0.0573806335103867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430574764762215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247035648041636,0.0893515692652229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114226731852975,0.06978121099044965,0.09656853573259554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546991223110082,0.08580080234820638,0.07559263624645006,0.07575958815013949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278009368669335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325122669467227,0.0,0.0,0.17254364028451444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12586213474686878,0.0,0.13205094353057448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16428463942487473,0.0974642488826584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510805590622086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229893113505484,0.08191443163915718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38389469513025104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807820063304422,0.0857076397372146,0.17327790776994514,0.06821777380437137,0.07793348716900253,0.17861374760736418,0.0,0.0,0.0708150764025705,0.0,0.1713378455648456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540028277370339,0.0958301378574224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979996463031319,0.0,0.0,0.16136735417143214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194142878633189,0.0,0.06796247369200052,0.09983637497529456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162432007775649,0.0,0.08362569589961923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514798538481404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724709093735169,0.09557726811298373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06232298718155409,0.0,0.0,0.12162565297431477,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway937532,2020/01/15,"Mental And Physical Health Problems Have Me On The Verge Of A Mental Breakdown 25M My whole life I’ve been depressed and was diagnosed at 11yo. I’ve been on a few different antidepressants all seem to make it worse so I’m a bit reluctant to try something new. The past few years I’ve been dealing with multiple health problems. It started with kidney stones and that may be my worst health problem. Not only is the pain the worst I’ve ever felt in my life but it’s also brought on an anxiety I don’t know I’ll ever get past. Every little pain I get in my back or side (and there’s a lot of them) I can’t help but think “here we go again, another stone” and the panic sets in fast and hard. On top of that, the last 8 months or so I’ve be dealing with severe abdominal and pelvic pain (I have another long post on that) and can’t seem to get it diagnosed. I’ve had a colonoscopy, xrays, ultrasound and nothing. This also comes with anxiety. And now the latest news; last week I was diagnosed with skin cancer (basal cell carcinoma) and was treated yesterday, I think it’s call Mohs surgery. Of course it’s on my face and the scar is about two inches long. I already have practically no self esteem and I understand it’s just a scar and my health is more important but I just can’t help but feel disgusted by myself. I know there are plenty who have it much worse than me but I’m 25 and dealing with all these health problems and I just know the future isn’t looking good. I feel I should also say that I have suicidal thoughts on a daily basis but I haven’t ever tried anything and definitely don’t think I ever could; it’s just something I think about and kind of enjoy thinking about if I’m being honest. I don’t know exactly what I’m looking for, maybe advice if you have some. I’ve felt this way for quite awhile and am usually pretty good at dealing with it but lately, especially with my latest news, I’m beginning to feel I’m about to break.",2.6638124723573644,4.431081774436095,4.010323603125464,87.21239827509953,75.8671679197995,7.300633937785642,24.26662243844907,8.124751697461798,1.3344093468966536,1544,50,322,26,34,508,185,399,0.16399999999999998,0.75,0.086,-0.983,1,0,2,0,0,0,32.0,1,1,1,2,23,18,1,1,17,0,32,18,3,1,7,82,67,35,1,8,16,0,7,0,0,2,15,1,0,1,19,29,0,0,18,0,0,3,10,12,0,1,11,10,31,6,38,50,12,50,0,1,2,0,14,17,0,9,26,200,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928075990687019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782377679311907,0.17009144961695166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14868558713517918,0.10847363776571732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834305928902352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545162288880599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740231485830068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239484218650853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06107239761299186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056606328792390574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923711309869079,0.06106439185674178,0.21588010373846736,0.0,0.0740733787737074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25652540303923194,0.05973467009752637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075445622825294,0.0,0.13614650436920295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112392435555174,0.0,0.04029299914496567,0.11893185149253735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06351073249496465,0.0,0.0,0.37680659161755936,0.0,0.0,0.09504294511397486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382941537246923,0.15585487001857248,0.1155827567667318,0.07997609541648422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015478749832517,0.0,0.07105847782980175,0.0,0.12548509728648555,0.11907302203479901,0.0,0.0,0.06027499198315951,0.0,0.0,0.04732500299913516,0.0,0.07122662672891371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14289713035634286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056590151995974176,0.0,0.052118228890366866,0.0,0.0,0.06847378440400656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802859698778488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05392116647555338,0.2263215912205135,0.08318359302887833,0.0,0.0,0.13536043371651058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790073973959003,0.07212881139537487,0.0,0.27135945889874485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754088097083746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05638097987410131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290858551117843,0.07396213483498393,0.08009462309743197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916157474885392,0.0,0.0,0.050182009039034026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755096618595908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271430581500167,0.0,0.056285137177420085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627025248313964,0.0,0.0692570989484349,0.07380737678546513,0.0,0.0,0.07808419242515864,0.0,0.0,0.056275576923037064,0.056870144122583184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915514775348073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445023523735071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045656023663576684
mentalhealth,23andup,2020/01/15,"Been trying to figure out who to say this to so and I just landed on this sub I need help.  I can't remember the last day I haven't thought about killing myself or had trouble sleeping dreading the next day.  

I have an insanely hard time opening up to people and I hide my depression to the point that my best friends have no idea.  I know in my heart I am an incredibly strong person who refuses to accept how I am feeling but having no idea how to stop it.  

I just need some advice on how to get help.   
Thanks",2.143605870020964,3.764244849056608,3.5863522012578635,90.32772536687632,76.9245283018868,6.5979035639412995,24.041928721174003,7.3871296695380915,0.9137727463312372,398,13,87,5,9,131,69,106,0.141,0.672,0.188,0.7472,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,2,7,9,1,1,5,0,9,2,2,3,0,24,16,8,1,2,4,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,6,4,0,2,8,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,3,14,5,14,13,2,14,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,2,6,62,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838820135353732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19747760346558527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427140628006229,0.0,0.16207448280048728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514671742378328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538320724558138,0.0,0.09831344705186593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856745491791966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22298777339367476,0.2522588976128795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4248523733403949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081872831140766,0.0,0.10341582337157297,0.15338739119494213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790581210082011,0.0,0.0,0.20012579171070727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045655457237745,0.1643067777060692,0.0,0.0,0.17788579357660994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21316510720381374,0.0,0.0,0.14964397212564376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18831046904409854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573223677729799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17324586349569232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14938959056181428,0.10972610597081987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127758182025967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mrfish19,2020/01/15,"I dont know what to do I'm so tired 
I can't keep living like this
I relapsed and cut myself again
I saw my shotgun and the thought crossed my mind that I could just end it all and I wont have to deal with it anymore 
I'm so tired of living like this
I need help but I'm to afraid to ask
I dont want people to treat me differently 
I dont want to lose the people I love 
I'm so scared",-1.5736956521739138,0.028791630434781727,1.2088695652173909,102.78178260869568,89.21739130434781,4.114782608695652,15.72173913043478,4.935628992294339,-1.230673043478261,298,6,83,1,10,103,52,92,0.179,0.667,0.154,0.4079,1,0,0,1,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,1,2,2,0,8,3,0,0,1,15,21,7,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,2,1,14,4,8,17,1,3,0,1,1,1,4,0,0,0,4,48,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243229236386655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531183576033976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13077026939136271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885678852995567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17112213251795105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5758700117356599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14506630953217847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097827027600292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558105197744586,0.0,0.0,0.09001282971836325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003571515466716,0.0,0.2892531297825021,0.0,0.0,0.18323530582594535,0.0,0.0,0.14782379745744964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16537777155123004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144568552911746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270980058859277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16397895530085246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002826200611106,0.0,0.3764971960161581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19321115565507327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,halfblush,2020/01/15,"Your symptoms of OCD? I know there are sites that have lists of symptoms for OCD but what are some things you guys experience personally?

Any specific thoughts, the frequency of thoughts/actions, or miscellaneous things that aren't usually on those lists?",6.837790697674418,10.025701558139538,5.342034883720931,75.90979651162795,68.30232558139535,9.881395348837213,36.33139534883721,10.125756701596842,4.354725581395348,209,11,34,6,4,61,33,43,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,5,6,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,5,5,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,1,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20146047411697168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897897994189575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29333453540675763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16281150718184134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586744779123447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6158353279375213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39363128855042295,0.0,0.0,0.23518977660949425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262780317176371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hexagonwitch,2020/01/15,"I am mentally unwell because of my mom who criticizes everything I said, everything I do. Why can't she just let me be? She wouldn't be able to control people's reactions, anyway. My mom is a negative person and loves to find faults in other people, she's a know it all. I have become so anxious because of her, reacting to all of my reactions telling me my emotions/reactions are wrong. There are no wrong emotions, and people are entitled to their own opinions. Her family are not loving that I wished I'm not a part of their world. I'm sick and tired of all of these.",4.287105263157893,5.332833807017547,5.7008333333333345,79.57125,70.57894736842105,9.559649122807018,30.03947368421053,9.827888789773867,2.9270736842105256,450,18,87,11,8,152,69,114,0.242,0.711,0.047,-0.9711,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,1,4,5,0,0,3,0,13,4,0,2,3,16,20,4,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,5,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,1,1,18,2,11,15,5,2,0,0,0,2,15,2,0,1,0,66,23,0,0.15863484729630334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17921222383074642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934046610328144,0.17519972553179142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779224702376605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844285154162698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851415438318305,0.0,0.14954681589109356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498937651624805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718156341438557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622148792002036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2863482864057276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598666147603943,0.0,0.0,0.3715824317726536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717860807688789,0.0,0.3299322873756756,0.1385138298278304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508980667932895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138653848650897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18232742083834735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14314327561281984,0.0,0.18242224552230893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468846052059572,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thicclashxo,2020/01/15,"i’m so sad my boyfriend and i were long distance. we just got into an argument because of my splitting. i have serious borderline personality disorder. at the end of the fight he told me his life was just fine without me and he didn’t need me anymore. 
i’m heartbroken. i feel so empty. i blocked him on everything but i just wish he would talk to me. i’m in so much pain. i’m so depressed.",-0.3198148148148157,1.9560749506172848,2.3387962962962945,90.31708333333334,95.79012345679013,6.156790123456791,25.26851851851852,7.492282038375204,1.6632296296296296,305,15,66,7,12,105,56,81,0.276,0.6679999999999999,0.055999999999999994,-0.9472,0,0,0,0,1,0,9.0,1,0,0,0,7,6,1,0,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,14,14,7,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,5,1,14,1,8,8,1,6,0,2,0,0,10,4,0,0,2,41,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26061879241939473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16019540591970344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22634214109877404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30118210192631595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327554814428313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361802715342052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287540005128054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101785614332318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856175780547044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325624208494867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19318216653981515,0.1948567458263921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796289401844857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294596115343593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112220467130723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251108769827618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3021975325121236,0.2533218601848779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866797126526759,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ornonic,2020/01/15,"My story, I never did plan on sharing this but I do hope it can help anyone that is going through what I am.  I started to hate myself when I was young, really young. I can honestly admit that I don’t remember a time when I was truly happy. Maybe happiness is not for everyone. I am trying honestly, I don’t want to be this way. I hate living this way, but I truly do not know what to do. A great example of what I mean is I currently am sitting at a fantastic Chinese restaurant eating one of my favorite meals as I wright this. Most people would sit here and enjoy their meal if they were alone they may even read a news article or watch the television that is currently playing. Then there is me I sit here and can not focus on anything, the people are really loud, the television won’t stop making repetitive noises as the wheel of fortune is on. There is no reason for it, but this is starting to make my blood boil, controlling my emotions is an ability that I have lost a long time ago and I currently am to the point that I just might start to cry. The voices in my head refuse to stop and I do not know how much longer that I could ignore them. I really want to get help but I do not know how, today I signed up for online counseling as I am just too scared to go see someone in person because my head fights against me. I do not want to feel this way, but I am too a point that I just don’t know what to do anymore. My life has always been this way it wasn’t until I lost her that things took a huge turn to the worst. That is when I Started to feel like I Was losing control of myself, to the point as of late I truly do not know when your taking control of me or its me. I am losing myself, im so scared that I cry at night because I just do not know what to do anymore. I used to drink so much so I could pass out and forget you where there but then that started getting even worse for me then having you there. You started out being nice to me you used to give me encouragement and I kind of started to trust you. I thought maybe this was the part of my head that I was missing. Then I started to see you and I thought I had a roommate until I introduced you to my friends and they could not see you. I was so confused and scared. I was 24 years old and living with an imaginary friend, I had no clue what was going on and I had no one to turn to for help. I started to get used to you and thought you where there for a reason you always where nice and you truly did help me. I miss the old you I was no where near as scared when you where nice to me. I do not know what I did to upset you but you started to get mean to me like really mean to me. You would not stop putting me down, you would even wake me up and make me feel like shit about myself. You where so real to me and I could not escape you.  I have become comfortable with the idea that you will always be there, but I am scared for my own safety, I cant get you to stop you never stop and I cant do this forever. I do not even know if I can do this for another year. I am constantly scared that you are a more then just my head playing tricks with me. I am worried that you are going to actually hurt me one day. I am scared that you are going to hurt the people that I love because you are jalousie of the affection that they show me. I really do not know what you are capable of but I do know that you are capable of controlling my life. I do know that you can have me so scared that I will not leave the house for days on end, I do know that you can convince me to kick people out of my life. I do know that I just cant take it any longer. I do know that I am scared of getting help because you keep t telling me that if I do seek help that they are just going to lock me into a facility. The worst part is I believe you, I let you control me because I hope it gets you to stop, stop being mean to me, stop reminding me that I am useless trust me I already know. I just want you gone I really do, I just want to not hear your voice anymore. I just want to have myself back, I am starting to feel like you are learning to control my body. I feel as if your slowly starting to take over who I am I feel lost and disconnected and I really do not know what to do. The only thing I know is that I am stronger than you and I will beat you. Trust me I have no clue how I am going to and I am terrified I truly am but I will win this. I will defeat you and I will take control of myself once again.  I might not be able to tell you who I need to talk to or what I need to do but I am becoming more and more aware of what your doing to me I really am.",1.60173,2.782122713,3.421400000000002,92.79670000000002,77.37,6.68,21.5,7.268377926160553,0.4220400000000004,3563,90,848,42,80,1198,281,1000,0.16,0.669,0.171,0.9325,3,1,1,0,1,0,66.0,0,45,7,16,47,59,5,11,29,0,128,17,8,19,2,167,223,67,0,21,46,0,6,4,2,13,3,4,0,1,60,29,5,18,36,5,0,11,33,30,0,3,26,14,204,29,107,174,11,103,0,11,4,1,75,28,1,14,61,658,264,2,0.036932125221272566,0.0,0.0360404266928504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03273810065173472,0.0,0.0,0.038250543583041585,0.04075551855714548,0.0,0.09219146026489504,0.0,0.0,0.02511511160700289,0.038726553465823314,0.0,0.0,0.10988023278424956,0.025823800669396848,0.0,0.030391992236098668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028398524611118744,0.0,0.11256740371647396,0.08157726139436304,0.0,0.04160985804955515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04102326536918458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0399105069863404,0.2899576318660458,0.11794918717922286,0.0,0.08113641071313958,0.04763633089846479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03617942250992956,0.0,0.03779078421653105,0.0,0.04154366994577671,0.03271090091051715,0.0,0.0,0.09757328157392788,0.0,0.0,0.035290228340382035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204395318845363,0.07915295291239398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057067336663714927,0.0,0.13506857777601974,0.03542865980395879,0.14692564505086236,0.0,0.0,0.040717798438308576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862986809624521,0.0,0.07292565514901106,0.15161206158163976,0.0,0.04162518926947693,0.0,0.14852895024018653,0.0,0.0,0.07336386715234149,0.0,0.042614713903298726,0.07907320779550908,0.0416918739810844,0.03989303282348138,0.0,0.0,0.0328269698253181,0.0,0.03845912514940632,0.3450478127726249,0.0,0.041661045899740234,0.03910578803141949,0.0,0.037765600266790336,0.07825875676945898,0.07217268347764595,0.0,0.06522348639656812,0.03268376863462198,0.0,0.0826352025016707,0.12094733224656685,0.0,0.033332684938637634,0.0,0.07395744110355519,0.0,0.074206567599581,0.16091964555790644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835829704883357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054298723004854416,0.05476940577262826,0.05696866352789012,0.0,0.0,0.034658297669389264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750810553512405,0.03933150802648056,0.07507849158254272,0.028088545456078192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998778521061709,0.0,0.10241634176077004,0.03224770720473771,0.0,0.0,0.10473838755579898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03712698656881239,0.0,0.0,0.03694211957886464,0.04203684397300185,0.18927732094289207,0.07594475152847552,0.0,0.0,0.04183689838816184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327795018704768,0.0,0.08829036654894801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037910295810735975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031292469850707945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31368897984266425,0.0,0.0,0.24701528316864904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107344762681028,0.029684643288819663,0.06456061058540986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490721258712624,0.0,0.0,0.08795994620181306,0.04307083843361525,0.0,0.03500733634971179,0.0,0.04103295002995315,0.025074488736874463,0.08034309382802975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569249485104914,0.0,0.0,0.13070114600325627,0.11726000780687147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037506365890222285,0.0376369908002053,0.0787065663682599,0.0,0.0,0.04756615555042085
mentalhealth,chrisis-xmas,2020/01/15,"My experience with meds and why i lowkey miss them i stopped taking antidepressants and antipsychotics after almost a year and I miss the person I was when I was taking them.

After years of being a depressed anxious neet, goin to different therapists (none of them really helped me) and being prescribed Sertraline and Risperidone, I started going to college. It all got way better, I talk to everyone there, got a significant other, haven't selfharmed / had a panic attack / wanted to kill myself for a while now and started working on my traumas. Feels good...

Well, since im stupid, i quit the meds on finals, 🤠 2 months ago. Deep inside, I still thought medication didn't radically changed things, like it didn't affect one's personality that much so I thought I was gonna be totally fine.
The withdrawal symptoms hit real hard, I barely passed my classes because I couldn't be productive for shit, I was horny everyday for like 2 weeks (its not that fun when your SO is on finals too), I was exhausted all day long and needed at least 12 hours of sleep a day and everything would make me angry.

And now, I realized I'm actually not that nice. I'm impatient and hotheaded, not as fun as I thought, don't like people as much as I used to and, basically, I didn't remember I was a bitter introvert.
It makes me anxious to think that maybe people like the person I was on meds but hate this version of me but hey, that's my business and I'm proud of me for doing so well and getting so far and you should too, no matter where you are now.


Accepting you need help doesn't make you weak. In fact, for some people, taking medication made a big difference in their journey to stop feeling like shit. It's not ""depending on drugs"", it might help you control your emotions so you can approach them more calmly and try to find a way to feel better that works for you. Then, if you're gonna stop taking them, please get help from a psychiatrist, don't just fuck up your doses like I did. 🗿

I particularly feel like taking them saved me from fucking it all up during one of my panic attacks and helped me feel more comfortable with the changes I needed to make in my life.
Do whatever you feel like you need to do but NEVER stop trying to heal yourself. NEVER give up on fighting because sometimes, that's the only thing we got left. There is a way out, it's just different for everyone.",6.2917893217893255,6.396735653679656,6.816666666666666,76.66722222222224,65.83982683982684,9.874747474747474,31.829725829725827,9.633347757342033,2.8411509379509376,1880,68,356,35,27,616,229,462,0.124,0.703,0.17300000000000001,0.98,2,0,1,0,2,1,56.0,1,12,7,7,20,41,11,2,17,0,31,14,3,9,7,78,77,33,1,9,10,0,7,8,0,5,9,0,0,3,19,20,0,5,14,0,0,4,16,19,2,2,19,8,58,22,49,47,12,56,0,3,0,2,32,19,4,5,38,236,77,4,0.0,0.0,0.06346124963538033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05764639791182305,0.0,0.06511953704658477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469339063459825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479651744676523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928505585062823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502994838835072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375891622755247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729382265894886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387972519372974,0.0,0.05601143551944968,0.0,0.0,0.20383186433551076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541575903458968,0.0,0.0,0.07315155371680951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428054803484527,0.05844601445309869,0.06361317183691735,0.0,0.0,0.19729092954490107,0.13937530060229322,0.0,0.1424774043453181,0.0594375065908473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024093272231735,0.06795242786020925,0.06238402900240949,0.03695883402537018,0.054545239283731256,0.15603461490828746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058255346360941214,0.06420502794925467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179458285738361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404281340418376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024505387516948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194759090157317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065678870723006,0.0,0.04593358953846093,0.2541683938463902,0.0,0.0,0.05755072818708395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061534267683039975,0.17363581448006635,0.0,0.06533276577377398,0.0,0.21670562116031167,0.1310245549287014,0.0,0.06898802131837391,0.0,0.0,0.05190743006160662,0.0,0.09561109930413267,0.1928797881190296,0.1003124243879891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813389728841596,0.04945929775677488,0.0,0.15260063403706078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525371980082576,0.17034868769973413,0.0,0.07138493078290015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916888147331568,0.0,0.07401995187208522,0.0416607696443274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366788066102098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350756175555992,0.05379463264128652,0.0,0.06507834862249605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431770136199293,0.0,0.09205909624451536,0.0,0.051934147055154416,0.21747659485992615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067592507772672,0.24447753656540644,0.05226976290107878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550644880968288,0.08640792342985132,0.041669484845137744,0.0,0.15488296382837308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830408156771304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05616623572679539,0.0,0.0,0.0383571950318981,0.15485665634103185,0.052164253399539895,0.0,0.11694204786578645,0.0,0.05868070883606431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468724375809937,0.0,0.0,0.0461964291637223,0.0,0.0,0.0837561579752165
mentalhealth,aremarten,2020/01/15,"RANT: I am SUPER Struggling and I need to snap out of it. I was sexually assaulted when I was 20 and relationships are really difficult for me.

For the first time in my life, I put myself out there with someone I've cared about for four years, and things went great for a couple months, but he ended up ghosting me on Christmas.

I know that he’s a human version of a flaming pile of garbage for just ghosting after four years of history. But I can't seem to snap out of my funk. 

My workouts have been terrible because my mind is not focused. Work and school is just blending together, which is not great because I have an intellectually demanding job and I am in graduate school full-time. I have been antisocial. I feel like I haven't smiled in weeks. I've been in a consistent state between angry and nothing.

I did go back to therapy. But UGH. I just want to get past this and back to being my regular, motivated, ”get things done” self. 

Sorry for the rant, I just need to get this out of my system with the hopes that tomorrow will be a better work out and a better day.",3.39598680593733,4.983545448598132,4.8138042880703695,82.97102528862013,73.48598130841121,8.212864211105003,27.074216602528864,8.841846274778883,2.032790324354041,842,31,171,17,17,281,119,214,0.149,0.698,0.154,0.4944,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,7,9,13,1,1,10,0,21,1,0,1,0,33,34,12,2,4,9,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,8,15,0,0,4,1,0,3,4,5,0,3,8,1,24,8,34,23,1,30,0,0,0,0,5,11,0,2,15,121,32,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21745377777153765,0.0,0.17239069653989875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501113572143528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416542039877375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15645499600023627,0.0,0.0911904778055838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469998478113072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12523729797070904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149544219557592,0.10101527496158333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027368035670208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22162498805200515,0.0,0.08036015201830235,0.0,0.0,0.3117851794837101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404408352428965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403164130041981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770903949358962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987409872084166,0.06908027304690885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14277240056830046,0.0,0.11286311055610546,0.0,0.0,0.20969072081472293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356758869167786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498107936302886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214476979378798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905836417761313,0.0,0.0,0.15180931000067466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286206110346935,0.0,0.1287240855771792,0.14750970454082213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980667795280793,0.0,0.0,0.15828429234381974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14782064476693846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16170176116676666,0.0,0.18787805528827511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245073166151543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340062951236811,0.0,0.11342152542557883,0.0,0.0,0.13107803153344352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20587990674629247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821122815383495
mentalhealth,abitwistful,2020/01/15,"Difficulty connecting I don’t know if this is the right place to post this. But I need some guidance. I struggle so much to create meaningful connections with other people. I don’t know why I’m like this. I keep people far away from me. If I start to get close, I keep them at arm’s length. Whenever I have a bond with a person, I always have one foot in the relationship with them and one foot out. Ready to go. I’m never committed to anybody. I always think that there will eventually be an ending instead of simply living our bond. It’s affected me my whole life. I can’t tell if this is normal or not. But I feel envious of others when I see them close. Especially when it’s people that I failed to connect with in that way, connecting with each other. Then when I try to do it myself, I find myself just distancing again soon after I am reciprocated. Why...",1.7799486191393683,4.096353433526012,3.846194605009632,84.60573378291589,81.13872832369944,7.0814386640976235,20.59377007064868,8.167268648758528,1.1516887604367376,676,19,136,14,18,230,104,173,0.07200000000000001,0.856,0.07200000000000001,0.0164,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,3,1,9,4,1,1,5,0,11,4,3,1,2,32,24,12,0,5,8,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,13,10,0,2,6,0,0,1,5,3,0,2,0,2,26,1,21,22,4,23,0,1,1,0,7,10,0,5,11,101,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28345849760831665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003182068655927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508629346069768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612460022229745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556796809206131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899105038069828,0.0,0.09680317729131556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027964907264225,0.0,0.0,0.187219205994596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031000243854732,0.08321524724803121,0.0,0.15040561845119987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252130707181154,0.12629846704837158,0.13136996415912955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16688846478736322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308417326890949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3542587357653558,0.14872668155981908,0.17795990792841934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16313025802757258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18287202277965586,0.0,0.14546196077953066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573195707792746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056133871700035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17806721021920754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887702420023624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10914139029204004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564374105631026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352010216576909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30739492794270884,0.190168762914186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Phill_408,2020/01/15,My mother is on the verge of being homeless and I don't know how to help anymore. My mother has severe depression and anxiety and has been out of work for 6 months now. She says she can no longer function at work. I am currently paying all of her bills and rent but cannot support her for much longer as I have already spent all my savings on her.bWe also have no other family who can help. She needs affordable housing and therapy immediately and I don't know how to even begin helping her.,5.576666666666667,5.907133877551023,6.553469387755103,77.16891156462589,67.36734693877551,9.390476190476187,31.639455782312922,9.2995712137729,2.7540965986394554,392,15,74,7,6,131,65,98,0.125,0.794,0.08,-0.3792,3,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,1,0,13,0,0,2,2,16,19,11,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,4,0,5,1,0,0,2,1,13,2,12,16,3,9,0,1,0,0,13,5,0,0,4,58,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24416100255527964,0.17693798431247293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16925989102212824,0.0,0.21942605359478093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19056708199144068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613720481984854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085800423788328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44490879619502494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552991996813054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431925291524502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17660407002209874,0.0,0.16264828808088228,0.16405818765440894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17595129481731514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24995579490401015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510781774413696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530250053457128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221533527475379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RahaanTheBarber,2020/01/15,"no control/self harm not sure how common this is or where to ask for help

​

basically for context, i used to take overdoses. spent a year or so in a psych ward before being released, after that went back to college with a few minor hiccups. recerntly it's been weird because i feel like i have no control over what i do, feel like i could shout stop and i wouldn't be able to. recently trhat moved onto cutting skin and peeling it back and cutting deep into fleshy parts. So far, I've been able to just use bandages and basic stitches but I feel like I'm getting worse. feel like I'm going to do something, like cut off an arm or guge an eye out.

​

​

I know it's stupid but I have no idea what to do. So far it's just a bunch of cuts on my face and chestand arms btu I feel like I have no control",2.525563909774437,4.058386222222225,3.5957936507936523,91.0375,75.66666666666667,6.0553049289891385,25.66457811194653,6.5431188927421005,0.8194507936507938,648,23,139,5,14,209,105,171,0.18100000000000002,0.715,0.10300000000000001,-0.8699,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,9,14,5,0,6,0,13,6,5,5,1,32,29,14,0,2,8,0,6,6,0,1,1,1,0,0,8,8,0,3,7,0,1,3,6,7,0,0,4,8,12,7,19,21,3,21,0,0,1,0,2,11,0,3,13,85,20,2,0.1997920074328096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32471183487184524,0.36415373603374296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338927850558096,0.0,0.0,0.1536277212912028,0.0,0.06089567666433605,0.0,0.08500414147432622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3361255874926687,0.0797588303557459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25255210509041986,0.35682862507582463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05219153888631757,0.0,0.056773201016341875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695818557372171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127704288124576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05490023113634242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928248488426982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061736426693159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817763723036933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863525212626477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421331838508648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690482413805927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835175321538601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415080128206844,0.0,0.07510936258367999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17255614660677376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926045962603419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018025621413739,0.0,0.0,0.36415373603374296,0.06432975117422991
mentalhealth,ThoughtsIKeeePrivate,2020/01/15,"Does it ever just hit someone that you're actually doing everything wrong? TBI. Had traumatic brain injury. I thought I was doing good but I realized I'm fucked. Like I'm not talking to people right and just fucking failing.

Like I'm fucked. I nerd help not sucking.",1.4286764705882362,4.11507880392157,3.0923284313725468,84.24672794117646,94.29411764705885,5.6872549019607845,25.98284313725491,7.1686216300943375,1.8793313725490208,213,10,37,4,8,70,38,51,0.373,0.456,0.171,-0.945,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,3,10,4,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,1,9,13,2,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,3,0,4,3,1,9,0,2,0,1,0,3,2,1,4,0,3,18,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.2251282729962048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25753561169308425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20188564668676973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086798301120151,0.0,0.0,0.20733676649823948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6398306135497973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934987979383425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15463221501456206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254150835573682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993716128619806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19701509716004767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954699303455588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18542656376058045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18314868975715698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252232387553598,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cumrag6942069,2020/01/15,"Schizophrenia I went to the pediatric doctors today to up my dosage of medication (citalopram). I talked to the doctor about hallucinations. She said it likely wasn’t the medication and gave my mother a list of psychiatrists. The doctors believe I might have schizophrenia. The psychiatrist will either switch my medication or diagnose me with schizophrenia. I’m really nervous because of the stigma around schizophrenia, but also don’t want it to be from my medication because it’s worked well for me. I’m not sure which one would be worse. Hallucinations is a side effect of the medication but it seems like mine are worse than most cases. I’m not sure what the best outcome is in this situation. I avoided telling my family because they’d think I was crazy, and now than they know I’m seeing and hearing shit I’m sure they think I’m crazy. What do I do, where do I go from here, what’s the best outcome?",4.489666666666668,6.871912947058824,5.211176470588239,77.88696078431374,72.47058823529412,7.827450980392157,28.39215686274509,8.648137234880735,2.325403921568628,731,29,130,14,15,236,94,170,0.17,0.728,0.102,-0.8904,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,3,4,7,11,1,2,11,0,16,11,1,1,3,24,33,7,0,2,6,1,0,2,0,3,10,2,0,0,9,5,0,1,5,0,0,2,4,3,1,1,5,3,19,8,18,22,4,9,0,0,1,0,10,5,1,4,4,90,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918223314364164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221505486113354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20998149156301016,0.0,0.0,0.12936397465731655,0.2409951616592045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11654092243109407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35257255044699165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824304264994873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06525543401014472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941163902432942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310263197997361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121915050182746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5783505096500957,0.0,0.12180696148426493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780569747699846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355728815663083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092210876064103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149749022712182,0.10452874790461716,0.0,0.0,0.11786213114860294,0.0,0.12906364182670496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3246523689035496,0.0,0.0,0.09228878977556146,0.10035863594734293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714535186267289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883690511442848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772441488549387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323789005733626,0.1064402396222718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359107300865737,0.0,0.2340248658506283,0.08156556109774113,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tealpeat,2020/01/15,"I never learned how to clean up. Hi, 26F here and I need the support of the internet! 

I was raised by parents with mental illnesses in a pretty dysfunctional home. I've had some rough patches and gained some scars, but I've done the hard work to recover and grow. I'm actually a therapist now, and I work full time while I complete my Masters.

There is something that I've never been able to fix though, and I'm pretty embarrassed about it...

I really don't know how to clean a house. An orderly and tidy house wasn't the focus of my upbringing and now I just don't know how to start. What needs to be cleaned? When do the things need cleaning? Do you clean everything at the same time or go by locale or by priority or...? How do you keep it clean?

Thanks friends!",2.3594805194805204,4.341591961038965,3.6415584415584417,88.54662337662339,77.44155844155844,7.5168831168831165,24.63636363636364,8.418075326091056,1.5227064935064931,598,21,128,12,14,195,92,154,0.043,0.759,0.198,0.978,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,0,4,12,4,0,1,10,0,12,1,0,4,2,30,24,18,0,3,5,1,2,0,1,0,1,0,7,0,5,8,0,2,3,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,5,2,11,3,16,18,4,17,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,5,9,83,16,3,0.16106132158225514,0.0,0.15717261648932696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16886973135911806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16482165127511222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475153054416354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443557752456773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091534860714808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14427930847010104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155763768447132,0.0,0.0,0.3716862811979007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431587029430192,0.0,0.0,0.1770301804483198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16231193012779085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3582747874579401,0.2484408406395153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17883953729474447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.327714533278926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318000681643563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399287409825248,0.0,0.0,0.11400003239399292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18277047906853064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14828362564194367,0.0,0.18700460815727465,0.10700198537618796,0.0,0.1582419307015703,0.0,0.1878323036709024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23450912068592736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mili_Is_Here_Baby,2020/01/15,"Wondering if I should be hospitalized. Hello reddit peoples, 

So  I've had a self-harm issue for about 2 years now and it's gotten worse this past school year. It's gotten to the point where I've cut up my legs so badly that I get dizzy. That may just be me, though. I'm honestly scared of myself if I'm going to be frank here. I've told my parents about my self-harming twice. Nothing has really been done. I've had to advocate to get myself examined for mental illness ( Turns out I have depression and anxiety!) I've just been so stressed lately and I can't talk to my parents about it. I have a counselor and I've been dropping hints to her that I kinda don't want to exist anymore. ( I'm not particularly suicidal, I just don't want to exist if that makes a drop of sense) She keeps on asking "" But you're not suicidal?"" And i'm always like "" YUP!"" and leave. I think at our next appointment I'll bring my notebook that i keep all of my angsty thoughts in and get her opinion. I'm just not sure if it's worth it in the end? Is it really that bad? I'd just like to get an opinion from people I don't see everyday and have to deal with in real life. The internet is great! Well, thanks for getting this far. I'd like your input if that's alright. Have a wonderful evening you wonderful people.",1.0929766330323931,3.2399594646840164,3.071283855549656,90.15438197026023,82.60594795539033,6.370738183749339,21.503053637812,7.5804360353943165,0.8470391927774825,1012,32,218,17,28,340,143,269,0.11900000000000001,0.741,0.14,0.6896,2,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,1,2,0,0,17,15,1,2,8,2,22,3,1,1,2,43,51,18,2,8,14,2,0,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,15,10,0,2,6,0,1,2,7,6,1,1,10,1,25,9,28,36,1,22,0,1,1,0,13,10,0,12,11,131,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288984438329903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540100405137498,0.0,0.11071261584101597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436430870271524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18642229100836694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509150359576716,0.09615166382850894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424207899891885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988760939403126,0.0,0.0,0.0737343262217089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29162522524873685,0.0,0.06344514029580735,0.0,0.0,0.1230787520784692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651866572264533,0.0,0.1984538769569856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259299307990006,0.11820608614791756,0.0,0.0,0.07885159554971899,0.16361869054711126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451769584034006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250252743297212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187258321945068,0.0,0.0,0.10711746386732328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479164647325838,0.0,0.10656890638430364,0.2321824119885031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553181924942913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270658654434193,0.14303337454321596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176680954281064,0.11298128717043095,0.08895919845191039,0.0,0.23292076146033305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787831584224704,0.0,0.0,0.2442226706451726,0.0,0.10521532500138744,0.0,0.0,0.08972854604155259,0.0,0.1027791527616553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153164816398189,0.10968150730376748,0.08862627504947974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667269428329328,0.0,0.0,0.12142758333876208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316912551127508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10037390016458353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3631924599919367,0.0,0.0,0.113766314421358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437794598641208
mentalhealth,Delphidelphidee,2020/01/15,"Mental health is getting a lot worse My mental health is declining. I just started my second semester of college [18F] and i feel really alone. I'm only an hour away from home and I visit on the weekends, and I spend almost the whole weekend with my partner [18M] so I shouldn't feel like this. My roommates are loud and obnoxious, I have no friends on campus, and I'm at risk of losing my scholarship. I have depression and anxiety and it's been getting worse. I think of cutting sometimes. I think of pushing away my few friends and family so I can kill myself without them caring. I don't want to put my parents [53M, 49F], sister[14F], and partner through that but I'm at my limit. I see my therapist as much as I can but it's tough with school. I'm taking 50 milligrams of zoloft but it doesn't feel like it's working. I'm considering checking into a hospital but I don't know anything about it, and honestly the thought scares me. If anyone has any advice I'd appreciate hearing it",1.428893280632412,3.925339131313134,3.32193675889328,86.57899209486168,84.45454545454547,6.069740887132193,26.28546332894159,7.423996415210882,1.650232498902065,780,35,150,13,23,261,117,198,0.174,0.765,0.061,-0.9101,1,1,0,0,0,1,26.0,0,0,1,3,5,13,2,2,6,0,13,3,0,0,0,32,33,19,1,3,7,1,3,2,4,1,3,2,1,2,8,13,0,1,7,2,3,3,6,7,0,1,2,6,26,6,21,30,4,14,0,2,1,0,8,7,0,3,6,98,34,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193519778931875,0.0,0.0,0.1351981245502042,0.13983493013161458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181490111868597,0.0,0.10328618560755454,0.0,0.0,0.09440570052287624,0.0,0.11110592720516553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25370227074102675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376568976128408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628831191132427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12728022475422265,0.0,0.2048030811871073,0.19290963567068975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20862467007412272,0.0,0.14107963941391613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870294855899921,0.15217183569106538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543115855761995,0.0,0.13296268149096765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14937420929205106,0.0,0.07420077063953304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13192312064268502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510473667275671,0.0,0.11478501390194995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.272126939462461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925163705367587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268507120224953,0.0,0.0,0.14991829590278766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357274717305977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649413338429955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517367346475684,0.13664249415434912,0.10758955804870728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13353339095916686,0.0,0.0955643860854042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151455596083783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15676294294310406,0.0,0.17302445494984478,0.0,0.1071869118653455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963540692264495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507395428245385,0.0,0.1301497429870143,0.0,0.09829260430525773,0.0,0.2751838528770226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mylifemyfaultmymess,2020/01/15,"Almost 4 months of Grad school, still haven't done anything productive. Meanwhile, a teenager just found another planet in 3 weeks. I'm so exhausted from comparing myself to other people - especially those younger than me... but my brain thinks it's always a great time to tell me how much less useful I am to the world.",4.82677966101695,7.1047147288135655,5.0120000000000005,80.14613559322035,71.20338983050848,8.109830508474579,27.0542372881356,8.841846274778883,2.277621016949153,255,9,44,5,5,80,54,59,0.036000000000000004,0.8109999999999999,0.153,0.8377,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,3,2,1,2,0,7,7,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,1,7,5,2,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,4,28,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638162572638694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192190974101724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762598641628394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21680441184089214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29410751485137115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696101561012772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888693322265997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29046461559002706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21029056016234854,0.0,0.19367277099387256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18264938479391585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666347000813193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21039879768311104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23027488782774536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16881396939437093,0.0,0.0,0.15362513456756416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22754409453868346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21133101860023795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,abbsxd,2020/01/15,"I don’t know if anything is real anymore I can’t tell if anything is real. I don’t know what it is if it isn’t real. I don’t know if I’m real. All I can think about is what would happen if I relapsed. What would happen if I did this. The most painful way to die. The least painful. I’m scared. I don’t want there to be something wrong with me. I don’t want anymore help. I just want to do what I want, I want to cope my own way. I don’t know if this is real. I think this is a cry for help. How do you get admitted to a mental hospital. Please help me",-1.7454427083333317,-0.02073861718749903,1.197375000000001,101.67679166666667,91.421875,4.038333333333333,16.34583333333333,5.2151,-0.993851666666667,419,10,112,2,15,146,53,128,0.157,0.695,0.14800000000000002,-0.7956,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,1,4,0,21,2,0,1,1,31,38,8,1,14,8,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,9,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,1,0,18,0,8,34,4,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,8,0,74,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22347652380135055,0.0,0.0,0.1854354492401803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237625905982576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693356415569918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05886537057796565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992672345344532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265607696839893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476817139035528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135447553045368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397774271247611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367771208594182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.64121504327661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280222169469124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673879078332626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847845555930723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14438864037340984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.332278120294528,0.17886423878250413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16007492345648056,0.12318684447047876,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HamAndspinach,2020/01/15,"I’m afraid I’m going to become an orphan I have no idea where to put this so if it’s in the wrong community I’m sorry, I just need to talk about this before it eats me up inside.

My mother died of cancer a while ago. It was quick and sudden but it was also terrible.
Now it’s just me and my dad. Im terrified he might get sick too or he’ll die in a car crash or get cancer as well and then he’ll die and I’ll be an orphan. I have no other family except an uncle and aunt but they’re not the nicest to take it gently.
I’m just terrified something will happen to him and I’ll be alone again. And I don’t know how to fix this fear or if I’m just crazy or if anyone else experiences this.",-1.30842105263158,0.5801021337579613,1.9128863560174345,96.06572913174656,91.35668789808918,4.833925578276903,12.084813945692256,6.339386263674448,-1.007540127388535,533,6,132,6,19,190,92,157,0.35,0.615,0.035,-0.9962,0,1,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,14,5,0,2,7,0,9,4,0,1,0,27,23,22,3,4,15,3,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,11,7,1,0,2,0,0,3,4,4,1,0,2,0,9,1,13,15,0,14,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,8,7,83,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15380220256680974,0.0,0.0,0.1796994246866249,0.0,0.13875232674767052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12131911572545785,0.17777694131974178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19162324985332632,0.14764044493127046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5402141079960887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17753949476361958,0.14494162442660086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697217223484524,0.16356559223643552,0.19524198270996249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812989788303654,0.0,0.09860720328263993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15343038606882664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958666483325408,0.18741576918563116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953541134727804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18406197115250733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286521678626952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17442100168536007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13357305016172066,0.0,0.19422525965407653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304545816006846,0.13945718992065634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600232786394447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897010830693107,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,strangerinmoscow_,2020/01/15,"My heart hurts It was dead(like I couldn’t feel it or feel any feelings) for a year until I started feeling feelings I never thought I’d feel. My eyes are more open and I been so confused. I don’t know what’s going on and it’s giving me a slight panic attack. I cried for the first time in a year in a call, then again the next day in class and I ran to go to the bathroom before the waterworks started and stayed there for a good 15 minutes. Luckily we were studying for midterms and my mind just wasn’t focused on it. Anyone knows what’s going on? Or if anyone experienced something similar. Fuck I wanna cry now but I’m in the car with my dad.",0.7312009803921526,2.9421001102941204,2.6092352941176493,92.50439215686278,84.66176470588233,5.097254901960786,22.301960784313728,6.42735559955562,0.4481525490196083,509,18,109,5,15,169,86,136,0.114,0.816,0.07,-0.67,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,1,5,6,2,2,10,0,7,3,2,0,1,27,25,12,0,3,5,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,9,0,0,5,4,5,0,1,6,8,14,1,16,18,1,27,0,1,1,1,4,8,1,4,13,71,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071535371732484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22035431323436472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17925951566284898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408113244934944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089738901616624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461682168686908,0.101620120857885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4780351403920913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134029629276954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567165172615645,0.0,0.15115625503504984,0.2686533251092757,0.13216289861305774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18672213896983755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16868278436321069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731935652738777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910157452900933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215283033690353,0.0,0.16757831751288044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848753657456571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12130568855122695,0.0,0.0,0.22305882535568047,0.16794949141387974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509360251014315,0.09188079191916683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20294083883502884
mentalhealth,AvisRune,2020/01/15,"When I have a good day, I feel like I'm making up my mental illness. Long story short, I don't know what my diagnosis will be (still waiting to see a psychiatrist), but I oscillate between good days and horrible ones. On the good days, I have energy and I can get things done. I am patient with my kids. On the bad days, I am a volatile, irritable, angry, overwhelmed, anxious mess. But still, even when I'm totally calm, when one of my triggers comes up, I devolve back into that mess.  It almost feels like I'm two people. When I'm in the thick of depression or an anxiety attack, I KNOW I need help, but then I'll feel normal again and all is good in the world. These episodes are usually short lived (as in, a matter of hours, days, weeks) but come and go frequently especially when the stimulus is gone, so I haven't really been ""stable"" in years. Can anyone relate?",3.5872450805008924,4.935389209302329,5.0060465116279085,82.73716457960644,72.6046511627907,8.548121645796064,26.02146690518784,9.057496981413335,1.9665450805008948,672,22,137,14,13,225,108,172,0.203,0.642,0.154,-0.9282,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,0,11,13,1,1,10,0,15,1,0,2,2,27,33,17,0,2,5,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,8,0,1,5,0,0,4,2,6,0,3,3,5,16,7,16,28,2,38,0,2,1,0,2,13,0,2,23,88,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451264825275294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276250798758996,0.15175529308954636,0.0,0.09392704839461627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528204005242415,0.0,0.10329190616179554,0.11216040362527617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314277598426716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4331604800280705,0.0,0.11569871141389855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13746679779763396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872406561824177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037646965329873,0.19193155270362092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018217144374088,0.0,0.07634315086623034,0.4506803898428254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900389404062716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228853925037934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764912152923254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13125424914326733,0.0,0.1186163423747326,0.11887831530161368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966668950874536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537360599414075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099604405494162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316154242205668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18205172307383136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312789403191374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605559417748161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704406163637906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145531117685704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924325277570422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122143463570946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479461298260409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077518696713121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650447413855786
mentalhealth,carrionjazz,2020/01/15,"Exercise causes huge depressive spirals but my medications limit changing my diet and I need to lose weight? So I've been dealing with my depression okay for the past year, with a few ups and downs, but the year before was really bad plus I had a heart surgery. I ended up gaining a ton of weight during that big down period, not to mention during the recovery time; I had been around 140 for years, and I jumped up to 200. My cardiologist also told me I should pick up exercise because of my heart, because I had a valve replacement and now I get winded really easily; I was never really active or in shape, but now it's even worse.

Like I started with, this past year I've been dealing with the mental health aspects okay, my meds are stable and I'm trying to get back up to where I was before my major breakdown. My big problem is every time I try to do even a little bit of regular exercise, that progress with my depression tanks. Hard. I know a lot of people and a lot of studies say that exercise helps with depression, but for some reason even something as simple as scheduling half an hour a day to hop on an elliptical makes me feel awful and I don't know why. When I go to gyms,  I feel like it's my anxiety comparing myself to other more fit people, and my low self esteem and terrible body image gets in the way, but when I'm just alone in my room I don't know why I still feel awful. I don't get that dopamine rush while exercising, or the feeling of success if I keep at it long enough, or anything. I used to walk places a lot, and I would just do that, but it's currently 0 degrees outside and getting colder and I feel like pacing circles around an indoor location would have the same effects.

I don't think I'm straining myself with unrealistic workout or weight goals, and I've tried all sorts of apps and videos with simple routines that go through timed sets to ease into regular exercise. I stay extremely hydrated (I carry a thermos of water everywhere and refill it constantly bc my meds cause dry mouth) and most of my diet is made by someone else and out of my control (I'm in adult foster care until I get back on my feet, meals are prepared by staff--I can ask for small changes, but a lot of the generic ""health foods"" I also have to avoid bc they counteract warfarin by having Vitamin K). I just don't know why it seems to have this opposite effect on my mood that everyone seems to swear by it having.",9.978931090613132,6.317042597938143,9.960727075420513,69.11424308193166,61.16494845360825,13.262072707542051,39.546934346174716,11.10113133989139,4.172793814432989,1920,68,373,37,19,641,244,485,0.12,0.765,0.115,-0.6984,1,2,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,1,9,19,19,0,2,22,4,29,23,5,10,2,86,62,39,0,6,16,0,9,3,0,3,10,1,1,2,17,30,8,4,15,9,0,5,7,11,0,1,11,10,51,7,65,48,14,66,0,6,0,0,10,30,0,14,31,246,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676582365823127,0.0,0.11854725373613008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056701491560214125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06099433101005789,0.13196478301867176,0.06929206553045572,0.0,0.0,0.11398719747437015,0.06188698878696914,0.0903655598473106,0.0,0.12614108676398322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091969243546551,0.08233045756274802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557013914577998,0.15228303107326654,0.15681797212042625,0.0,0.0,0.08009723926596264,0.08313172778041132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04780117921118859,0.15282864627357218,0.2553573141502178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061917633853716965,0.0,0.06564819779742752,0.07658563094103818,0.0,0.1468664094432619,0.0,0.06244918050415985,0.07082470448439737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873861464165195,0.10590248845500548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962603134917146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323474122843721,0.0,0.08424805134270319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663968377334974,0.0,0.0,0.1575718946244362,0.0,0.17566478670254615,0.04968098112351806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299313376746593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588113895358308,0.0,0.0,0.16293735102833104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086336619130293,0.0742875737172254,0.0,0.0655937454599779,0.0,0.08292116645915988,0.0,0.2520562245073143,0.0,0.07013400557411753,0.049475583439696304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16466091512549605,0.07466796316687582,0.07469538772525383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05495893850867687,0.0571658069241924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415115902453738,0.10277075950907633,0.0,0.07743948018863861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092269783448846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424492446472682,0.0762075627885699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05894308922122865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495187724730506,0.0773231810143401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280151855031357,0.057061090941655776,0.0,0.0,0.05246241982124531,0.07900191093779746,0.059192217543155075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04749301474509916,0.0,0.0,0.1296596627769086,0.0,0.0,0.07082470448439737,0.0,0.1509675628412717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401576288891099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05883289646539799,0.0,0.27077407175157897,0.0,0.0,0.2006449405622495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553447162188767,0.10530524673379073,0.0,0.0,0.1909230440689727
mentalhealth,blackops4pro,2020/01/15,"I am easily tilted by the smallest things, it's a strange feeling, can someone Please explain this to me? I have recently realized there's this feeling inside me that seems to get aggravated EASILY by NOTHING.  For example, I have this coworker who is fairly new and I'm teaching him things.  He'll ask me extremely valid questions and I find myself internally fighting to ""remind"" myself that these questions are valid, yet I still feel extremely aggravated by his questions and am unable to hide my frustration even though I know I shouldn't be feeling this way.  It's a strange, internal feeling that I don't know how to describe.  On a really bad day, I will dwell on the smallest thing and start thinking that this person is out to make my life horrible.  For example (on a really bad day), if a friend or significant other speaks over me, I start to think they are just ignoring me.  I will keep thinking about this small moment and it just builds up inside of me where eventually, I lash out at the next small annoyance from them.  The problem is, I will realize the next day that there was no ill-will to begin with from the person and I legitimately overreacted for nothing.  I've lost many important people in my life because of these overreactions.  The weird thing is, I'm at a point where I'm able to logically argue with myself and tell myself that I'm overthinking it, but that feeling of frustration is still there.   I find myself having a hard time enjoying the presence of people I really care about.  How can I better manage this ""feeling""?    


TLDR;  I have this strange feeling inside me that I know is temporary and illogical, but am unable to battle it.",6.798026315789478,7.386773262820514,7.417415654520919,71.13109311740894,64.76923076923077,10.799190283400812,34.049257759784076,10.65788864234165,3.8035166666666655,1326,55,229,33,19,439,150,312,0.136,0.754,0.111,-0.6923,0,0,0,0,2,0,35.0,0,0,2,2,16,17,6,1,15,0,24,2,0,3,0,49,54,15,0,3,6,0,9,0,1,5,2,1,0,2,29,12,0,2,24,0,0,0,3,13,0,0,2,10,38,4,36,46,0,31,0,1,0,0,18,15,0,6,15,169,67,2,0.10356859601482687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968226565410876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17295090321846968,0.06313445484168485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159800676243232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559508612220657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20037952924016916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06840608088910084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4189391522657424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893196409084682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001684036804473,0.0,0.05411031678158596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927771190838459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205652682751668,0.0,0.0,0.17075577545090714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630712450507638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305735695293508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913284206322506,0.10500230062510653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002719540789076,0.2202927536437456,0.0,0.0,0.19875372227341492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360284794859351,0.18086420642634346,0.0,0.1136872173586064,0.09790579956266003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910115914177528,0.0,0.0,0.3480615909698899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19904608389769704,0.0,0.1022614939561204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428496004746603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775333531056542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661277064786535,0.0,0.16542002912490034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052351788761312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27522549268419216,0.19908772322905102,0.10175561973808367,0.0,0.0603916812128321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220793079523504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brand_spanking_grew,2020/01/15,"Please no hateful comments 31F- I’ve been in a bad place in my head for a long time, we even just doubled my medications and gave me on weekly therapist calls. But I’m not where I want to be in life and I don’t know why or how to get there. I just want things to be consistent and have a routine- working retail doesn’t offer me that and the jobs around here are scarce- I can’t move because my husband won’t. I just feel stuck and so sad, it’s the kind of sadness I feel deep in the core of who I am- I can’t shake it.",-0.11166666666666814,1.7179213965517268,1.8110344827586216,99.29574712643681,85.0344827586207,4.901149425287357,20.011494252873558,5.985473137389443,-0.29192298850574705,406,12,102,3,12,134,79,116,0.195,0.784,0.021,-0.9462,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,1,10,6,1,1,6,0,11,3,1,1,0,19,21,9,0,2,6,1,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,3,0,1,2,7,5,0,0,3,2,14,1,12,15,1,14,0,2,0,0,7,9,0,1,3,67,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977431334830578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18546958975918015,0.1354086185299124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268199546865139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671502170195014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22463158982938525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605395598938155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21930776346206235,0.22796985554261956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22043012788191446,0.0,0.0,0.2313146094879679,0.12207704819706452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689725728997508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965783971669304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237729895759606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360894412486348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23207897012392936,0.24383245385805796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579104930614157,0.14757355489183158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952601149775328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26203650785020344,0.0,0.17817959295591554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004381186996296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617135629423626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,craw-fish,2020/01/15,"How can I ask my parents for therapy? How can I ask my parents to get me therapy?

I've had troubles with my mental health for a while. It usually comes and goes in waves of sadness then neutrality over the course of a few weeks or so. I'm a teenager and I'm pretty sure I have some form of social anxiety, which complements my horribly nonconfrontational and unmotivated personality nicely. It makes it difficult for me to bring up anything serious with my parents. So, I've usually put off confrontation about my issues as much as possible, thinking ""It's not too bad right now, I can wait"" even though I know that's a flawed mindset. Lately, though, things *have* gotten worse. I haven't even been able to hang out with my friends for months because they're busy all the time, and I'm separated from them at school because of our schedules. That, among other things, is really starting to get to me mentally. I know I need help. My friends know I need help. But I struggle so much to try to get it.

I know a lot of people would say ""You just have to go in and do it,"" or something along those lines. And I understand, there's not much else I can do. But if I can just get any other advice on how to make it easier I could really use it. I've seen recommendations like texting a parent while you've already left for school, so it's not as direct and they can't just go talk to you in your room once you send it; though I worry about the stress that would put on me throughout the day. Anything like that, though; advice on when/how to say it, how to phrase the question/conversation, whatever. I just need some help.",4.832763684913218,5.508224158878505,5.62688028482421,81.9461682242991,69.09345794392523,9.104939919893187,28.681352914997767,9.23628265651192,2.1959427681352914,1269,43,262,24,21,415,162,321,0.095,0.8,0.105,0.6261,4,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,1,4,2,0,23,14,1,2,11,0,18,1,0,7,2,50,47,30,0,7,12,4,0,2,2,2,1,2,1,1,21,13,0,1,6,0,0,8,5,8,0,0,4,3,36,6,44,40,9,36,0,1,1,0,24,15,0,6,15,178,57,2,0.08478190143433499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165695785705558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935589364683211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05765460027062784,0.0,0.06485792253899729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953656198857695,0.0,0.1585192662513603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078934635528097,0.10336452039442368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730321009830858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769144952920905,0.0,0.0,0.0546773125934377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082439967240971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199529260044473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100457347513508,0.0,0.17718017702201186,0.0,0.09636701676963567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011919664425257,0.0,0.0,0.17048256421695904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849027806793071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18637566316015616,0.0,0.09563767765762436,0.0,0.09211578397690058,0.0,0.0,0.08284030908311751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207854076998539,0.0,0.0,0.11318515509934507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170880431459556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767210485836525,0.0,0.18697335805453014,0.1885941169379612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09028995804563482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3765610731249733,0.0,0.0,0.058777095417632624,0.07402828614207656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557885515244054,0.0,0.08625367340247295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17045845571962304,0.0949751328561104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862691404698922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240328058448284,0.0,0.1348439418338722,0.0,0.171607621082484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642447167569713,0.0,0.06526924979309336,0.0,0.0,0.060009066205274186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971173816448866,0.08863245150351105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990593874927099,0.0,0.0,0.06814448089157066,0.0,0.0,0.1939109862122759,0.0,0.11265065613917832,0.05432481909598404,0.333191150792035,0.0,0.04943700852435148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05756134584374139,0.0,0.0,0.08826094938748692,0.0,0.07322434166153581,0.18675057306621184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800692736516377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610013631799772,0.08640000068206283,0.12045326053472878,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sniperkirby14,2020/01/15,"Anxiety (?) Related Stomach Advice Hi Reddit! First-time poster here. Sorry if I mess up in advance!

Some background: 
I am diagnosed with anxiety, depression, PTSD. I eat generally very healthy, sticking to organic things, fruits, veggies, water, etc. 

I just got through my first semester of nursing school. It was extremely hard. 
As soon as I got home I began to have stomach issues; a dull pain in my LUQ every time I ate and sometimes pain during BMs. The pain was sometimes severe. I prefer to not eat spicy foods since it causes more stomach upset. For a while I thought it was a stomach ulcer but I cannot go see a doctor until May due to insurance issues. 

Could you guys throw out some advice for management of my problems? I have a feeling it is anxiety related (I have had issues in the past with it) but it doesn’t make sense that I would have problems AFTER the difficult semester. 

Thanks :)",2.904676961865744,5.725521371257488,4.16005042546486,80.89212732429878,80.79640718562874,7.108603844941695,27.95115033091711,8.20500826718156,2.4877736526946106,707,32,119,15,19,231,107,167,0.198,0.736,0.066,-0.9440000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,0,2,3,11,0,1,8,0,15,16,4,2,0,22,25,8,0,6,5,0,2,0,0,2,6,0,1,1,8,4,6,0,3,0,0,3,3,10,0,1,9,4,17,1,20,13,4,17,0,2,1,0,3,5,0,4,9,82,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359055756939433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770199403030824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239986080797949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637414918398808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396414917164254,0.12251434169638092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354800075703536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24702533441488106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346194186321327,0.0,0.0,0.10170025384527673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06103272614243125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20534541419500849,0.1459585228464015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860016527320233,0.0,0.1930796908383942,0.0,0.0,0.11951820275387524,0.0,0.0,0.10812912511430846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107824887431055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3779580132718864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057238468685933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.385320003278068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115227810307652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309992321733949,0.14109919150623104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221612078802965,0.09618728381590383,0.0,0.0,0.13636374801018458,0.0,0.099849488960346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387632110037049,0.13512080729345655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111301327921438,0.0,0.0,0.08019189436729858,0.0,0.0,0.09582730982382852,0.07038480735561832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995953291670464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574628391923117,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,droogMaster64,2020/01/15,"Anxiety so bad my face felt numb I was just sitting there. Nothing unusual happened that could make me anxious. But I had an overwhelming feeling of anxiety that made me want to writhe around on the groung. And the longer I held it in the more my face started to tingle. It felt like my brain was gonna explode. After a while, I couldn't even feel my teeth. No it wasn't the dentist's office.",1.441167369901546,3.9013262531645583,2.47130801687764,92.97872011251759,83.9367088607595,5.536427566807316,23.967651195499297,6.937597516519254,0.8934039381153305,310,12,64,4,9,98,58,79,0.172,0.762,0.066,-0.8173,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,6,0,6,7,4,2,0,14,17,4,0,3,2,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,8,4,10,1,7,6,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,43,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3793339463287186,0.28009210426666914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207116626981761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070125056413376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767736290826868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19795318503446416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637564643194592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507233035731485,0.0,0.4761063779641405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21924506939161986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112684206272288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345988471751049,0.16549624883470107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378970290856988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17548724202090302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623646423656275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Affectionate_Two,2020/01/15,me and my broken heart My parents kicked me out and disowned me after I came out as Bi! I now live with a friend and I am absolutely heartbroken! Any advice?,-0.12593749999999915,2.17686078125,2.3934999999999995,89.3015,97.4375,5.0600000000000005,18.9,6.742157984588678,0.4710175000000003,123,4,25,2,5,42,24,32,0.22699999999999998,0.685,0.08800000000000001,-0.725,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,7,2,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,8,1,5,1,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,19,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3764189537226612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261953364942341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4405731712111334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976092860202401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4564710965471675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3401440535523649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4277258004927952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hopeful_Cupcake,2020/01/15,"Emotions are like dirty dishes Most of the time, you want to deal with them right away. 
Sometimes they need to soak.
But if you wait too long, they get really gross and more difficult to deal with.",4.115175438596488,5.846960868421058,3.3236842105263165,93.79412280701756,71.89473684210526,7.171929824561403,20.561403508771924,7.793537801064563,0.4454982456140355,155,3,33,2,3,45,32,38,0.198,0.7190000000000001,0.083,-0.742,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,5,3,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,7,5,2,4,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,3,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826390767866648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6202837004394471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33839252794512537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571709189707958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697002481040305,0.0,0.0,0.2662245079810931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22306115104469876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19271898462553055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569066209827705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975279190892034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754160130447117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743694470218166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alycat611,2020/01/15,"Made mistakes at work and just need someone to talk me down right now. Feeling worthless My work is freelance, so I don’t have much opportunity to make up for my mistakes because today was my only day of work. I’ve met these people before and work with them periodically, and it’s a smallish city. 

I’m already pretty socially anxious (which is also what causes these mistakes sometimes). First, a few hours ago I made a huge mistake at work. That would affect a big project starting for them tomorrow. Someone helped me fix it and I had moved on after about 2 hours of beating myself up. 
Got home to realize I’d made another huge mistake. I had to call and tell them what had happened because they would realize it at the time of the project tomorrow. They replied to me so politely/condescendingly that “these things happen.” I can go in and fix it tonight. 

I am feeling so incredibly worthless about this as I never really get the opportunity to work with these people, and have now embarrassed myself twice in a row. I know that after I hung up they had to all be talking about how ridiculous I am.",4.77992857142857,6.472305504761906,5.599226190476191,78.29598214285716,70.14285714285714,7.916666666666668,32.17261904761905,8.472884824447931,2.619690476190476,876,40,158,14,16,286,118,210,0.13,0.7829999999999999,0.086,-0.8591,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,6,10,11,11,1,1,8,0,16,0,0,7,2,32,32,13,0,8,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,16,9,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,9,0,2,10,2,24,2,30,19,3,33,0,2,0,0,13,14,0,0,17,115,40,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671469264454543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328486549253856,0.09627243079409907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623494240704855,0.0,0.13600161695062335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14677205641447572,0.0,0.10243939579409148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292729793201365,0.0,0.0,0.12366931420232902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763884143159921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174129214540637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240004682854137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289657911188945,0.0,0.06841798891842359,0.0,0.09628347173468292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21291342020354276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069202223179177,0.0,0.12075671037749977,0.0,0.2371114031781595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616085297751623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3417356869173612,0.08035841459976661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795098704205465,0.08849736883173935,0.08926449896293419,0.09284890231448394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155877816689707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16692062482556055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247557450347815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712218610311099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280876205866983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271809885997395,0.2040048894547007,0.0,0.11906457265460865,0.0,0.08520964463291476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19352299136275672,0.10522244080157317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997893472003746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701978916596461,0.0,0.11411160282646896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5258535041752709,0.0,0.0,0.1710371477858133,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,M1N321,2020/01/15,Please read this Will going back to a short term inpatient hospital after going to a residential hospital get me sent back to residential?,12.942500000000004,10.89568491666667,12.945,45.00000000000003,54.0,17.933333333333334,44.83333333333333,15.903189008614273,7.691133333333332,114,5,16,5,1,39,17,24,0.0,0.9009999999999999,0.099,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,3,1,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,11,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6208651512772808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21092487354300934,0.0,0.4588820525521263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44315877952836186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40382511019349104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unknown-phantom22,2020/01/15,"Most heartbreaking phone call I’ve ever had The past month and a half have been really hard on me. I’ve never dealt with depression before and it’s hitting me in a major way. I opened up to my parents about it over when I came home from school for Christmas. 

I thought I was getting better but being back at school is extremely hard. Just the first week of classes has been almost unbearable. I’ve been keeping in frequent touch with my family, calling them every day, multiple times. 

The talk we had the other day just completely broke me in way I’ve never felt. I was talking about how it was hard for me to even interact with people the same way, and that I just didn’t even feel like myself anymore. My mother asked me if I was thinking of hurting myself and I took a pause and said it was something I thought about but I didn’t know if I was going to do it or not. 

My mother broke down into tears. I was on speaker and could hear my father in the background starting to cry as well. I’ve NEVER heard him cry before. I’ve seen him shed a few tears at my high school graduation and at funerals, but never in my life has he cried with so much pain. He said to me in a broken down tone “boy... I would lose my mind if something ever happened to you”. My mom started saying she wished they could fix me, and bring her old son back, but all they could really do was try to be there each step of the way. 

I felt like something died in me. I never pictured myself getting to this point. The depression is so bad it hurts me physically a lot of the time. There’s a constant pain in my chest and it feels like there’s a hole where my soul used to be. I feel so alone. I wished I could hug my mother and tell her everything will be fine but I don’t know if it will be.",2.3904098360655723,3.8957436147541027,3.6117158469945374,90.89790163934427,75.96721311475409,6.519344262295082,22.309289617486336,7.1686216300943375,0.5797853551912571,1377,37,301,15,30,448,179,366,0.187,0.745,0.067,-0.9943,1,1,3,0,0,1,30.0,1,1,3,3,22,18,0,0,17,0,35,5,1,2,8,66,65,26,2,11,14,7,9,3,0,3,3,6,1,1,11,19,0,1,10,0,0,5,9,11,1,2,25,16,53,7,42,27,8,54,1,8,1,1,33,22,0,8,26,212,64,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847423500486787,0.08116561679790721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07772000109810431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732635041215687,0.0,0.0,0.12052031423856245,0.0654340092672335,0.0,0.0,0.13337079735298607,0.0,0.0,0.06931013035279768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004498674118853,0.08963211822613935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216736037785248,0.08468797075343203,0.0,0.2502818948815622,0.0,0.2582507150259159,0.10108175772637347,0.0,0.13499649270445233,0.0,0.0813336146454885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352265406046267,0.1417766911571603,0.06602842270943937,0.0,0.07043210810926538,0.0,0.07387837887593082,0.0,0.1188756513913774,0.11197223433897324,0.15049114569856015,0.0,0.0,0.06665978351706267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188809434008494,0.0,0.04453834222958308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930056644607747,0.0,0.21060701356098926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883264352584155,0.0,0.0,0.08280009811933223,0.07860949698074891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16778913661653205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965708206718152,0.0,0.0,0.08613801015481945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055353638301815423,0.11485994357908386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767374986066448,0.0,0.06662567388376574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912934306049886,0.09178365822957904,0.06255259250751832,0.0,0.057609499515474234,0.0,0.3022111766434903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822340364776508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16677816159340525,0.0,0.08701839336414753,0.0,0.07481112661185453,0.05433050599105472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408309383393676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040909919902673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490918343365958,0.062321381633506576,0.0,0.2379378094243723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18099455281273574,0.0,0.0,0.11093855209473924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597846494558587,0.06849708903663125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05021505211147098,0.0,0.12443088155477645,0.09139402580980016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706973512646803,0.05320672998547645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768479294639743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24881949294942096,0.06286208510973527,0.0,0.07046224652676274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18023867228185972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05567038101002289,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alightsole,2020/01/15,"I don't know what the fuck is wrong with me anymore. Remove if a post like this isn't allowed.

Also sorry for formatting, am on mobile.

I was always your classic happy kid, I would have a moments as most do, but nothing to call home about. Last fight I was in was in 2nd grade (8 years ago).

All this changed when I got into middle school, I went from an A average student to failing most of my classes, I was falling asleep in class, I gained ~70 lbs by 7th grade, I was suicidal. It's evident I was depressed. I finally got help after my vice principal flat out told my parents I wanted to kill myself. This was a first run in with mental health issues.

Come 8th grade, I was kicked out of my school (private) for managing to have a .5 GPA and dragging down the class average, so I moved back into public school. I got a haircut for the first time in ~2 years. I was doing great, minus the occasional days where depression decided to rear it's ugly head again. I got my first and 2nd girlfriends, I was surrounded by friends, and it felt great. I ended up taking on a ""protector"" role. I felt the need to protect and help my friends. If I'm honest, the attention I felt with all the praise felt great.

The summer after 8th grade, came my presumed 2nd run in with mental health. I just flat out felt nothing. Not happy, sad, mad, nothing. I didn't feel empathy, and I would even watch gore videos just to feel a bit of *something*. I lied about getting a diagnosis of Antisocial personality disorder to my friends, and they all thought it was so cool so I just ran with it. During this time I had managed to memorize my parents debt card info, and would almost daily order food. This went on for a couple months, and I wouldn't be surprised if I ended up ordering over $2k during that time. My parents were understandably pissed, and my dad asked ""Do you feel bad about this?"" And honestly, I didn't. I still don't. I can see how what I did is wrong but I didn't feel any remorse.

9th grade rolls around, and I'm still going through my ""feeling nothing"" thing, and I meet a ray of sunshine in my nothingness. I ended up being madly in love with this girl, going so far as to fantasize about us being married and having a salmon dinner prepared for us when she got home. I confess, and she says no. Almost immediately I'm back in my nothingness state. Pretty much just ""well that happened."". About a month later the familiar feeling of depression creeps back, and I honestly welcome it. Feeling nothing for ~6 months is boring. The rest of 9th grade continues, switching between being happy and normal and depressed.

Summer of 9th rolls around, and I'm feeling stressed. I signed up for a summer geometry course, that alongside a summer job with insane hours brought me to the edge. I was honestly suicidal a couple times due to it. I became indulgent in sex, and food. My youth group and I go down to Oklahoma for a Christian youth camp, and I have the realization I feel nothing again. My brain is also blank, I can't really visualize anymore, and I can only think if I intentionally try to. But at the same time I'm also confident, it's easier to talk to people. It was weird.

10th grade (this year) comes, and I'm excited to see my friends again. I ended up failing the 2nd semester of geometry due to me not doing the work, but I still ended up in Algebra 2 which was fine by me. My confidence was being to wane though, and comments people made would suddenly cut really deep even if they wouldn't before. I'm stuck searching for a purpose, but can't find it. I have gotten involved with some groups I probably shouldn't be with. 

Towards Christmas, a similar feeling comes over me not unlike the previous two summers. But this time I wanted power. For whatever reason I became obsessed with the idea of becoming a dictator, invading Canada, and caring for the American and Canadian people. All of it seems a bit laughable in retrospect. Following this came a deep depression but ended up only lasting a few days.

Cut to now. It's 2nd semester of sophomore year, and I still can't form an image in my mind, it's a fog. I've grown a stronger affinity for math as I'm pretty good at it. I'm exhausted, but at the same time confident. I know that if I actually tried in school I could easily beat everyone. People have begun to accuse me of being narcissist. It seems even little blows to my ego piss me off, today being a great example of someone saying I'd just be pitty fuck. It just ruined my day. People aren't taking my advice anymore when I would have worked and it annoying.

Couple other bits I should add, but I'm too lazy to edit into the actual paragraphs. From middle school till now I was a compulsive liar and got extremely got at it. On July 13, 2017 I tried to kill myself.

I'm not looking for a diagnosis, but rather guidance. Is this just some weird depression? Am I really a narcissist? I just want a path that could lead me to being happy again.",3.7090307216003846,5.446184600619199,5.122285861713107,80.4652054060491,72.96284829721363,8.189045010716837,27.386957212034613,8.841846274778883,2.2404459950781934,3894,145,729,78,78,1303,398,969,0.149,0.68,0.171,0.9701,7,0,1,1,1,2,141.0,2,2,2,12,47,60,13,2,52,1,70,15,5,6,4,148,143,61,4,23,29,4,15,1,5,9,3,2,2,3,39,53,3,1,31,1,1,20,20,32,1,4,45,23,103,28,123,77,17,140,3,10,5,4,40,51,4,14,66,497,142,27,0.0,0.0,0.08501681038590694,0.0,0.0,0.04256645682989536,0.038613428736894065,0.0,0.08723835987025727,0.0,0.0,0.10450506543211753,0.036245519341087135,0.0,0.0,0.029622383490496125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959983791799878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755550550218186,0.04072284322056163,0.0,0.0,0.10048515807036544,0.036370890699696325,0.0,0.048108743431872034,0.037066463964068014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266914645763445,0.0,0.0,0.04862751349604722,0.04447976507159411,0.09964237287894996,0.04441245768950288,0.0,0.04608084377294017,0.11256958988265214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06955844173993292,0.14459537254394755,0.0,0.08427804447190076,0.0,0.22510966709729066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049923685127867455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314880856402271,0.0,0.0,0.08631316905246587,0.0,0.0,0.041623572840284964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202531156722741,0.0,0.2091227892333695,0.04771799538733395,0.039813171476125134,0.11115667804166984,0.10534616900716448,0.0,0.13461779966468124,0.080541280203366,0.022758371084110503,0.0,0.07426868055243913,0.036536172012704746,0.24387311789634575,0.19210079717774148,0.0,0.0,0.038520080854949165,0.18548228198234606,0.0,0.0,0.04470526251517615,0.09260476667328424,0.0,0.0,0.05839487652298313,0.0,0.08738872811440697,0.0,0.04289795548501163,0.0,0.0,0.04917408685377925,0.0,0.045465460514940055,0.04322670955666124,0.0,0.0963856641422279,0.0,0.04787901868637443,0.07101464292258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02128128018070304,0.04365869590642854,0.0,0.0,0.03657953996797048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03931471981772487,0.041217650124305664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779673517735212,0.0,0.04398331570725497,0.0,0.1043078452880096,0.04629752658727415,0.03202170910213142,0.032299285918582374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04267968065373135,0.2507827287782165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625888653890581,0.0,0.0,0.1451051147264234,0.0,0.0,0.15099555393202588,0.03803502705684255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0417185653091632,0.08863262875811577,0.04696518979578035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371720791189959,0.044787070610501814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928153066058224,0.0,0.22042589566729004,0.06942357088577591,0.07931101631033077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03690835847307138,0.033534717757690936,0.0,0.048762001436875715,0.0,0.0,0.1391487106891229,0.0,0.04989798401469989,0.0,0.0,0.0952954285925479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550359625508258,0.03501198406121408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028939416117249345,0.027911573695063658,0.04279760850856863,0.03458187908227326,0.17780184283302167,0.0,0.04128991176940654,0.041623572840284964,0.0,0.08872341076733034,0.0,0.04255191941478698,0.045347633627136,0.10479495072116546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707868334688656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03916579001622129,0.08076135752109806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342458976775743,0.0,0.0,0.1547193398051428,0.0952523322834282,0.0,0.11220518729371498
mentalhealth,throwawaynotsure-,2020/01/15,"My (34) mother (54) has severe mental illness, including bipolar, manic depression, and severe anxiety. Now staying with my family and stressing everyone out. What can i do? Throwaway account. Sorry this is a bit jumbled. I don’t even know where to start. Backstory, my mother has struggled with severe depression, bipolar, and anxiety since before i was born. She always thinks the world is out to get her and that life isn’t fair. Shes threatened suicide countless times in my life for things i have no control over. She jumps from job to job because people are out to get her. She moves from house to house because landlords are out to get her. I recently found out shes only been medicated for two years of her entire life and that was for depression. She is very incapable of being financially responsible because she makes snap decisions that wind up costing a lot of money. Example, she quits jobs without lining up another and not being able to pay rent. Every time she has to move or loses a job i end up paying the costs to keep her off the street. So tens of thousands of dollars by this point. I try to hold my ground but ultimately she just threatens to commit suicide or be homeless if i don’t help.

Now, about six months ago i bought her a trailer to live in on my cousins property. The agreement was, all she had to do was keep her job and live rent free and pay down her debts. Well, about a month ago my cousin calls me and tells me he’s on his way to my house with my mom because she threatened to commit suicide after she got fired from her latest job and her employer appealed her unemployment, etc. Anyway, fast forward to now and shes staying with me and my family because she has no where else to go. I’ve taken (paid) for my mom to see a therapist and get depression meds and caught her up on her car payments so it doesn’t get repo’d (another thousand). Theres a lot more expenses she needs to get caught up on that i dont want to pay for, but thats a separate conversation.

The issue im having is, she is stressing out my family (wife and 3 yr old daughter) and really causing me anxiety and an inability to focus at work because of what i know I have to come home to and the financial mess i feel like i have to help her with. Now i could just not help her but if i do that shell be homeless or dead. I have no idea what to do. What i was planning to do is get her medicated and see if she can hold down a job and eventually move out. The problem is, i just really need her out of the house and not living here. The constant doom and gloom and threats of suicide is draining. I went through plenty of that in my childhood and don’t want to expose my daughter to it. So what do you do with a parent in their 50’s who cant hold a job, has severe mental illness, and has no where to go?

Other considerations, there are mental institution but they cost about $6k per week, which is crazy expensive. Also, she said if i ever put her in a home (old peoples home or mental institution) she’ll just end it right there.

I dont know what to do.",4.6707654723127074,5.273969456026059,5.713438110749188,81.44009201954398,69.42345276872965,8.74586319218241,29.519381107491856,8.841846274778883,2.2122203257329,2402,87,484,40,40,797,264,614,0.198,0.75,0.051,-0.9982,15,0,0,0,0,6,67.0,0,1,2,5,26,17,1,3,22,0,57,9,0,3,4,89,91,41,5,10,20,10,2,1,0,1,9,1,6,0,22,40,0,6,9,0,18,13,16,13,1,5,16,5,82,5,87,69,6,76,1,7,2,0,61,36,0,10,27,343,104,15,0.05451890789476845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665544473208544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043598750946307434,0.04536409878709957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433565703762648,0.1251204459440544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994053213586564,0.0,0.04639157511114345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059520527147739685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05566990053988435,0.0,0.0,0.056005936332278315,0.0,0.0469632117173277,0.0,0.05891557123738225,0.06114759104081625,0.04352891171006163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18782822192970305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277915080340596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04554355183261597,0.0,0.09657514065116306,0.0,0.06080299372512129,0.036009224484428316,0.04931547345720004,0.04593453128255898,0.05209515284992152,0.0,0.0,0.15418672291392085,0.0,0.027566397941489185,0.03894831869341546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05977716849719535,0.0,0.0,0.19938715433052612,0.0,0.06196870349064475,0.0,0.0436037510404648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962862425782112,0.0,0.16406072945547856,0.0,0.0,0.251629999447489,0.0,0.0615452109489169,0.0588897760179157,0.0569035753851845,0.4328128294405231,0.09691782065874813,0.0,0.0,0.08988649795904384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155249508851906,0.026635184540975604,0.0,0.14442358351132775,0.0,0.0,0.06099271253769039,0.0,0.0927000517550723,0.0,0.0,0.03639179436601578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605582162630866,0.10984412804793656,0.21976894469575894,0.0,0.0,0.12770377201730665,0.08703294428176601,0.1738349132155499,0.0,0.08085015879479446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441684553624015,0.0,0.0,0.04146408617005059,0.0,0.0,0.06053679533938084,0.0,0.0,0.07559309232708918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051537990028909686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216723191595413,0.0,0.05480656065764426,0.0,0.0579875694111067,0.0,0.0,0.06985241686762114,0.0,0.05383084433602831,0.0,0.0,0.04655884945588044,0.05185996611221042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688902201066066,0.0,0.0,0.2463633909236983,0.0,0.04509860399340148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061029453859462165,0.03858876361519607,0.11621980368861586,0.0,0.0,0.12490244958659033,0.0569949998556004,0.0,0.2385393458402393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047651928518164674,0.0,0.0,0.06330065411028506,0.03621993988359567,0.03493351480195123,0.0,0.0,0.06358082724576587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03701475974544431,0.0,0.05325705110603606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04498380869511393,0.06431332882506208,0.04327457144058699,0.04373177938335364,0.0,0.049019045655019966,0.05053957382001567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05255428169879163,0.0,0.03969041426445061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03510838921162236
mentalhealth,Oofthedooff,2020/01/15,"Custodian lied about being suicidal I work for a large agency and part of what we do is mental health care. There is a newish custodian that started in the fall who has been dropping comments here and there to the staff including myself that are concerning. 

The comments were along the lines of “things can’t get much worse” “I’m barely holding on”etc. until today when he flat out told me he was going to commit suicide yesterday and didn’t. So after talking with him a bit I let my manager know what happened 

My manager talked to him and he admitted saying those things to me today and that he enjoyed “going up and down the halls saying things to get a rise out of people”

I am really pissed and annoyed this man thinks it was fun to say he was suicidal for attention or to get a rise out of me. I had a friend back in my army days commit suicide and I ignored the signs as I thought he wasn’t serious enough and  really don’t need this stress 

I’m at home really annoyed about this. When I see the custodian tomorrow, what if anything should I say?",3.9779326923076934,5.5274609278846185,5.0809615384615405,81.78903846153848,71.93269230769229,8.46923076923077,26.94230769230769,9.017664075816787,2.157301923076924,835,29,161,17,16,275,120,208,0.17800000000000002,0.7390000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.9749,0,0,0,0,0,4,8.0,1,0,0,1,9,10,3,1,13,0,19,2,1,0,2,29,36,16,4,3,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,4,1,1,15,15,0,2,5,0,0,5,4,6,0,0,10,5,18,4,28,23,4,26,0,0,1,0,22,9,1,2,11,114,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009650312295888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434254595624073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133947846275882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250926329140306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912616585749557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12677359504811367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479150599409766,0.0,0.19230445968443705,0.0,0.13945733962465104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849609737643116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041581896388255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12307004223077818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742829400132762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546084444611313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364464089528075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901927096671248,0.09097453568198982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13286343930726605,0.0,0.08505915854386058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23579883894572315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39027829278156656,0.0,0.0,0.09776960925141673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684200265690895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14054322868460215,0.0,0.0,0.5368203737182662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19723030418091544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445332646806271,0.07861605558286304,0.0,0.09740371352019683,0.0,0.0,0.232595269198258,0.11723742816220767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932121006462891,0.0,0.12503359180965198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DaddyBearIsHere,2020/01/15,"Well, that's not so bad... When I get into a bad spot, I tend to engage in all kinds of self-destructive behavior. A while back, I met with my psychiatrist and told her I'd been struggling a lot. When she asked my if I was engaging in any self-destructive behavior, I mentioned that I had been drinking quite a bit more. I didn't get the response I expected. 

I was expecting her to probe into it more and tell me it wasn't ok, etc. Nope. She, said, ""That's it?"" I told her it was. She probed a little deeper. ""Pills? Infidelity? Excessive spending? Violence?"" After each one, I replied ""no"". She asked how much I was drinking and I told her. She asked if I was driving after. I told her no. Finally she tells me, ""That's not so bad."" 

Not what I was expecting.",-0.5723039215686256,1.6171028888888903,1.9354656862745079,92.54084558823529,98.54248366013071,5.9486928104575165,20.100490196078432,7.333567415737692,0.9222725490196079,574,21,126,13,24,195,80,153,0.084,0.865,0.051,-0.6649,0,0,2,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,1,6,1,11,3,0,1,1,18,23,11,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,9,7,2,0,0,2,1,1,8,4,1,1,17,1,31,5,10,6,8,13,0,0,0,0,23,5,0,3,7,94,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294909023937238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3833403105991997,0.0,0.0,0.10510074842780727,0.3423736516155476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922237630112228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677945023940212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243761513341006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972948617461074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282239565744553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14233425476965558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13699221964504985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620295273757685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004776921447888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261990149383346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537913755322335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300167815878222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851802439393509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428906920569468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23893383844406302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5224256487339046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289438328560005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lydsiee,2020/01/15,"I'm afraid of what God will think of me. Religious post warning: I respect your right to believe in what you want even if its nothing. I please ask for the same kindness. ♡

So I've been quite suicidal lately, nothing to the point where I've wanted to truly act on it. But sometimes if I'm really upset these thoughts run through my head and I sometimes express it out loud and once the feeling has come and pass and I've calmed down I get an overwhelming anxiety that ive betrayed God and I will get an automatic sentence to hell for being so ungrateful of the life he provided for me. I then start to hate myself for being so ungrateful and having these thoughts to begin with. I have an anxiety already surrounding death and where I will go (yes, quite ironic coming from a person who can have suicidal thoughts). It scares me alot and I feel so bad and I don't know where to start to fix it.

I don't know where I was going with this post. I guess I'm kind of seeking for advice but also just wanted to vent and put my anxiety in writing. 

P.s I'm not super religious. I believe in God and Jesus but I wouldn't say I'm super devout. I don't even go to church but I do believe in it and was diagnosed with OCD a few years ago. I'm not so much the cleaning time more of an obsessive thinker and ritualistic.

Tl;Dr I get suicidal thoughts and feel God will hate me for being ungrateful and send me to Hell.",3.284933712121216,4.621398434027782,4.634204545454544,85.1539772727273,73.3402777777778,7.8752525252525265,27.674242424242426,8.438071523408619,1.8817166666666671,1111,42,229,19,22,369,142,288,0.23,0.706,0.064,-0.9949,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,0,4,13,16,4,5,12,1,21,3,1,0,0,49,55,28,4,6,9,0,3,0,0,5,2,2,1,1,13,21,0,0,11,0,0,10,6,10,0,0,7,5,29,6,34,40,5,34,4,1,0,0,10,14,2,4,8,149,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977120242316118,0.08863778114026982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034478672283783,0.07996438390159481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294831653716559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347997789548296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834899970081153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33797368365767433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722702696524992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149081291819667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208889650153646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516784297668556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15672668146159766,0.0,0.1704850169416276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015358750701144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974448160378028,0.10262168898905268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082546910160283,0.10990710015551733,0.0,0.11279648467756302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062802887918254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07350637682222097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918920036745677,0.0,0.0,0.10648930545649177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731005026516665,0.0,0.10976231127444457,0.09452572678661432,0.0,0.19153134970510796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052060578870982,0.0,0.2127097754529977,0.0,0.0,0.06405809062896757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539349479281133,0.0,0.07951846485323984,0.10011045936472313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977913119737292,0.0,0.14155115185816008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3281284110047373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407149122449485,0.0,0.31753316188521125,0.058306735494815874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17693542605693613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439222803749962
mentalhealth,PMme_your_dreams,2020/01/15,"Can anyone help me find a good cognitive behavioral therapist in the United States? Hi everyone. In order not to make this post incredibly long, I’ll have to leave out a lot of details. If anyone needs more info please let me know!

I’m a 24 yo female living in the US. I suffer from sever anxiety and trichotillomania. 

My hair pulling and picking of split ends is ruining my life, and I truly can’t live like this anymore. It controls every aspect of my life. I’ve been trying various medications and seen 2 psychiatrists and 1 therapist. 

None of them had any familiarity with trichotillomania and couldn’t help me. One of the psychiatrists also misprescribed a benzo to me which caused a great deal of additional issues. 

I still haven’t technically ever received an official diagnosis and my other doctors dismiss the severity of the issues I deal with. Because of my history with medical professionals, I have additional anxiety around finding and trusting a therapist. 

Can anyone help me find one or at least give me advice on how to find one who knows what they’re doing and has dealt with trichotillomania? I just want to live a normal life. 

If you’ve made it all the way through this post, thank you. It means more to me than you know. Any and all help would be greatly appreciated.

TLDR; I suffer from trichotillomania and need to find a cognitive behavioral therapist to aid in my recovery.",5.705039062499999,7.772815050781251,6.963718750000003,67.93440625000002,68.4140625,10.4325,31.159375,10.577609850970193,3.8404334375000007,1127,47,186,34,20,381,148,256,0.052000000000000005,0.799,0.149,0.9769,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,2,1,1,6,9,0,0,15,0,15,7,1,6,3,50,28,16,0,8,5,0,1,1,0,1,6,0,0,0,10,19,0,1,10,0,0,2,5,3,0,3,4,2,24,6,32,20,8,19,0,3,1,0,14,8,0,4,5,127,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553188803912486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699965514456724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904483374250174,0.0,0.13391820547357874,0.0,0.08680480400321394,0.18360599618621667,0.0,0.0,0.07791896844901973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335659291482588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991593379758034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981707138201842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18047618758122705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895891819184312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752431725953737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917458642715892,0.07374658017180657,0.08363728243087512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39999755426986816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396536280782299,0.0,0.07341479668972843,0.0,0.19300107526090293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23467417364719345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18271413540250087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431020940049236,0.0,0.0,0.09268009848842937,0.0,0.08950387470490602,0.1854720145045552,0.04276202929032028,0.0,0.231867945154406,0.0774600141952401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441364489640234,0.0,0.08282163229503167,0.05842598815911485,0.0,0.0,0.09534425304923687,0.0,0.1763516154254325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12980262453940594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575939693098313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779348363634088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096080065812454,0.0,0.0,0.16765631546152987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19776469959377896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699004147268598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058453088944739,0.0,0.4065095807383949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059426141312211876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528607100148868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05162660778160635,0.06947609049306992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621777720545754,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,okslime,2020/01/15,How much caffeine till you hit your limit? I love coffee and pre workout but my anxiety has it limits till I’m shaking and having panic attacks 😂 my limit is usually 150mg caffeine,1.2716666666666685,3.935913944444444,3.934666666666669,79.67700000000005,90.11111111111113,5.102222222222223,26.644444444444442,6.742157984588678,1.8366177777777777,146,7,23,2,5,51,30,36,0.295,0.643,0.062,-0.8689,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,2,0,3,1,4,1,2,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,7,6,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,2,5,1,4,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31699227230888943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4714062255388326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3739855236689889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046099705875933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4861744607476549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4563705264815671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cynerixia,2020/01/15,"A conversation with my understanding dad... lol Called my parents on the phone tonight, my dad picked up cause my mom was at the dentist. 

We speak for a bit and then he starts telling me about my brother and how he isn't doing good (depression).

Bit of background : I have generalized anxiety that is generally under control but had a very, very tough summer where it spiralled out of control.

Dad : yeah you're brother's going bad again...   But you know him, he wont take advices. Unlike you this summer, it took time but you took our advices and finally understood (!!!!) and started feeling better.

Me : .... Yeah dad i gotta go

Dad : why do you never talk long to me like you do with your mom ??

🙄

Mental health is a choice and you just need to understand that feeling good is better than feeling bad, thanjs again dad 💕",2.1105878136200715,4.775806600000003,3.0702688172043016,88.38762544802867,83.0,5.7670250896057365,24.74014336917563,7.1686216300943375,1.206455197132617,633,25,122,9,18,201,101,155,0.105,0.7490000000000001,0.145,0.7148,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,2,7,0,4,6,9,0,0,6,3,11,2,0,5,1,29,27,10,0,1,4,11,3,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,5,9,0,2,7,0,0,4,3,4,0,0,5,4,20,5,14,20,2,22,0,1,0,0,30,6,0,0,13,71,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25437061079078604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995677065690925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21734685880148272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23022185686007535,0.2841896384161087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290212354655925,0.0,0.0,0.13370435006328907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919582977612384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121017341253714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974298205721757,0.0,0.0,0.14257770714737086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14793941083895595,0.2183345545523944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383479670093054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715294162019784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358683152332965,0.0,0.0,0.11518248675682916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13116495249855434,0.0,0.0,0.3048703576153539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650778687134896,0.10038304342609593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144520981271433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18424781002874094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978598586146368,0.10461312068136948,0.11376062162381023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075894036776258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892125003242225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709904963372477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21478190702027927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744403904707215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,laynielove0827,2020/01/15,"How do you get through depressive episodes? They tell you to be where you are, to feel your emotions. But this sadness is so soul crushing, it's almost a natural instinct to fight it. 

For me, I can be fine for a couple days, my depression is there but manageable, but then it just hits me. It can last a few hours, or a day. Then I feel fine again. I want to know, how do you deal when you feel that way.   

Do you give into it and just be soul crushingly sad until you're not anymore? 

Do you crawl into bed until you finally feel like you can get back up? 

Do you fake it and go through the motions until it's over? 

Do you let your kids see you be so fucking sad you cant even look them in the face? 

What do you do? 

I'm not on anti depressants, I probably should be but I don't have health coverage, which is something i am working on but is a difficult situation for our family. My kids and husband are covered, just not me.",1.977001295336788,3.437835544041452,3.604530440414511,90.70451586787568,76.97927461139895,7.3120466321243525,25.015867875647675,8.07648339933343,1.2802437823834198,712,25,162,12,16,237,108,193,0.132,0.7929999999999999,0.075,-0.9269,0,0,1,0,1,0,24.0,1,16,2,1,13,13,2,0,7,0,28,3,1,2,0,27,43,19,0,2,12,1,4,1,0,1,1,0,1,2,11,5,0,0,5,0,0,2,5,10,0,0,0,6,30,3,19,35,1,24,2,6,2,1,26,8,1,2,14,123,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16743525704829915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582599831458014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285730902175965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185013132647126,0.0,0.2156714249811977,0.1723847217981066,0.43204955974123305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880871663951552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043970159034047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762938442962576,0.0,0.3381827635743902,0.1194538553810394,0.0,0.18316884534258152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15458165391813325,0.17471918170565132,0.16040172282328574,0.09502849921700762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17773491999275234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16466678681629446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189347223968826,0.13629732390222546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17098211955428896,0.0,0.08168967464936773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041310924126632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18027914870186906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324360354502418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879494692252984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872534733921484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14614768413094004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986239629625012,0.13272240168390764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172985034038868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SillyLight8,2020/01/15,"Shoutout to having made this account because i had no one to talk to while having a panic attack after a breakup and now i got over it happier then ever, i have learnt. and will never stop learning. I got over it and i'm happier then ever, its an experience ive used to improve, i feel like i just super sonic sped through levels of improvement and self care 10 times as fast, im finally becoming more peaceful, and have gotten wiser and i'm proud. i've learnt so much about my soul and mind and will never learn enough, i have shocked myself with how far i've come and i can't wait to learn more, I've gone further in life then alot of people thought i ever would, and i will continue to shock them and prove them wrong, and so can you, i believe in you.   


I love myself.  
And you do, too, deep down. don't worry.  


Thank you Reddit, you were a big part of my improvement.",2.37677839851024,3.9909824692737423,3.76455865921788,89.32713594040968,76.26256983240224,6.561042830540037,23.10651769087524,7.3011,0.8036052886405955,678,20,144,8,15,223,108,179,0.096,0.6859999999999999,0.218,0.9747,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,5,2,2,10,11,1,1,5,0,16,2,0,3,6,35,31,21,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,4,15,0,2,6,0,1,2,5,5,0,1,8,1,24,6,19,19,6,29,1,0,0,1,10,10,0,1,18,102,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18306086254635293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809058626984403,0.1777148875312098,0.0,0.1812929514198492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16406071662320054,0.0,0.0,0.1386116159512662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16626532168994068,0.0,0.0,0.4366629038351408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15740301253551076,0.0,0.0,0.08136204541597943,0.11495571097594474,0.0,0.17627145459502302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573923789384072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738127934261285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11365704870775607,0.07861357508099516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145229546903926,0.15225901849868173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16247545553197898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828898503036545,0.0,0.2482108239137801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903827414278648,0.0,0.0,0.18879580139346774,0.0,0.17425223658657454,0.0,0.1115562617957096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678665228381612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452980805089812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12933513465165666,0.0,0.1481463385760872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12774631622684526,0.09382920040796754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13897648004161592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341415443362348,0.0,0.11430741320987375,0.175932235091597,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jey_borne,2020/01/15,".... Glide these forces with no fear, yet I have schizophrenia. 
Glide with patient thoughts, yet I have bi polar. 
God I have been marked with a curse to fall. My mind is damaged. The memories I want to fade hold me close. I bleed and bleed, scathed from my hands. If I cut my own arm, I will get treatment uninvitedly in this beautiful world. Put me first before I do so myself; But I fumbled my mind, yet I’m all alone. Sinister voices I try to hide. Schizophrenia, I try to kill you and talk back to you my very self. To the point where I see no evil. I see good in getting my selfish desires. Honestly, I don’t know a positive and negative when I crave a gain. Bi polar, let me sleep. These constant thoughts is not helpful. If I drown in these thoughts, the time will go from 12:00 - 6:00 in a blink of an eye. My perception of time departures from my eyes. I almost died today on edge. I don’t need another thought to haunt me. So this battle on earth, I declare no victor. As each day I wake and sleep, I battle til my end. Even in my natural death to grow old, you had no business in that cause. Therefore, continue to destroy my mind if you must. I’ll be confident in my spirit.",1.4975770308123266,3.647977462184876,2.7548109243697496,92.97462535014007,81.10084033613445,6.151540616246499,23.782212885154056,7.333567415737692,0.9042011204481796,908,33,199,13,24,292,139,238,0.242,0.644,0.114,-0.9873,0,1,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,4,0,3,9,11,6,1,8,0,15,11,7,2,2,32,28,13,4,7,5,0,1,0,0,3,2,1,0,1,6,9,0,1,6,0,0,4,8,9,0,1,6,6,42,2,28,17,3,33,1,1,4,2,7,13,0,4,16,126,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783008922914336,0.14255716165821888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433121795792356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583936029701364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712448613601505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14139779685792156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14874373181027575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887686747503845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285222867379407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12191129203073585,0.0,0.0,0.09091223791800082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15488721202192546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707949634147055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14382610227418324,0.0,0.07822597675836873,0.11544884282766775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225954102825383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228214639627588,0.0,0.07564527150167924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074981106253867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41694211153490746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020609160194358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444337059760335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13011760398644354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383697414569355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193681078833431,0.0,0.14359219624691744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754858220539008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063263670759912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43709427703225,0.16052207111791514,0.0,0.13046994996019004,0.0,0.0,0.18690181155723914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357030808359984,0.0811857063732525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LaDaDeeBethany,2020/01/15,"I Used to be a Happy Girl I remember my mom would always point out how happy, silly and full of energy I used to have. My friends say I would bring so much joy and laughter into their lives. I used to be a fun, loving, lover of life.

Then it ended.

For the past 4 months now, I have been so empty. I feel so guilty. I let everyone down. I am not the sunshine anymore. A dark rain cloud has consumed me. I try to laugh but I put on this horrific mask. I am in shame. I want you back, happy girl. I miss all the fun we used to have.",-1.2959710144927534,0.6893829391304394,1.354782608695654,99.00463768115944,93.52173913043478,4.457971014492753,14.623188405797105,6.079149491110277,-0.80443768115942,398,8,98,4,15,136,77,115,0.146,0.591,0.263,0.8826,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,1,1,0,6,14,0,1,6,0,12,3,0,5,1,18,21,8,0,3,2,1,1,0,2,2,1,1,0,2,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,3,20,12,13,15,3,15,0,1,1,2,10,7,0,0,6,67,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13123956477033494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15642049584671927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128053941354215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396972470033598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071268623134282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975033484310533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12185769275421705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.503702548670148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16128416649642666,0.11140560251872036,0.0,0.0,0.13927377779179612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235267728932802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18472523324818568,0.12589433090940153,0.0,0.11594578425593476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15056604933274256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491007991203704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15855686235551647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786713103369891,0.0,0.0,0.12542899227009272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070847010952208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.544893912731365,0.0,0.0,0.09303009989843382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22408616774391588,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Annia_Sanna,2020/01/15,"Need a little help Hi, I'm new to this so I'll make this as short and sweet as possible. I deal with trauma from past sexual abuse and last march I told my parents about it and have asked for help (mainly therapy). My sister is dealing with a lot as well and my parents focus on her and my brother ( who is dealing with a learning disability) more. I won't go into detail but she takes her feelings into action as with me I don't. It sucks because I feel like I have no one supporting me, I know my sister can be a handful, I mean I live with her but it still sucks never the less. 

Her issues and struggles are a lot but I feel like mine are too. When I come back home from my therapy appointments nobody asks how it went but it is obviously different from when my sister gets back home from hers. My appointments have been getting canceled lately and it's like pulling teeth trying to get them to reschedule them let alone remember I even have one. not only that since my therapist is on vacation my parents just threw me into group therapy even though I said I didn't want to go beforehand. 

Sometimes I feel like they would rather handle her issues because mine might be triggering for them or they might feel guilty about what happened to me. I feel like my problems are just put on the back burner and I told my doctor this yesterday during a check-up but all he said is that my parents love me and care about my situation but my sister's problems are more pressing (which I do agree with) and to just keep up with the group therapy until my therapist gets back and to try to open up about my problems with group. 

 At this point I'm trying to look for ways to deal with my problems myself, I will be 18 in 2 years and I will have to do things myself anyway, I can't lean on my parents forever. I'm hoping by sharing this I could get some advice and maybe meet people with the same issues as me.",3.8133147321428567,4.994646023437504,4.723675595238095,85.62281250000002,71.83854166666666,7.673214285714287,25.693452380952376,8.07648339933343,1.432663988095238,1499,46,305,21,28,487,182,384,0.08,0.787,0.132,0.9676,6,1,0,0,1,0,25.0,0,0,5,0,23,20,2,1,10,0,32,4,2,3,3,72,72,31,0,10,12,10,8,5,0,6,1,2,2,0,17,28,0,1,10,0,0,8,7,8,1,2,8,12,63,12,50,53,9,40,0,0,1,1,43,15,2,7,21,225,80,2,0.0,0.08128332653578305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703804902598977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710520093104977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826907211033742,0.0,0.0,0.2110058625120494,0.0,0.08363949337930393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994532168490354,0.0,0.0,0.059095402400580366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05477390620233754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829066863474282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167552440861841,0.0,0.07021806845768253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09062325736359196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081264018600893,0.19603996250232628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792111571072497,0.0,0.0779773217186237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066539855921382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919662778337002,0.0,0.13762878745261325,0.06813824959958628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21481109760931305,0.0,0.060977490701544165,0.0,0.0,0.03770240984397832,0.05592059415271256,0.07738716221710842,0.0,0.0,0.07015120650369462,0.0,0.16757978116325425,0.06875821984155335,0.060577698100566076,0.0,0.057609234508771916,0.0,0.0,0.1166476197154844,0.06191687800363652,0.0,0.045793029341419336,0.0,0.06892092553585415,0.07472876908010452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555386485897756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05086824871441172,0.052910856058851236,0.06625719639971278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297432460203424,0.05217566618186367,0.0,0.0,0.38087751559188426,0.0,0.06548931769703947,0.047560676180557336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06485200113670632,0.07733956479669664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625751901938386,0.0,0.0689649544360336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771381568328675,0.0,0.130514309128938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05674910324991996,0.07711263646896915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785011247735448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054786437395755054,0.0,0.0,0.07171874171555019,0.0,0.0,0.07784986143911941,0.0,0.0,0.05158091163982911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138139970192502,0.15930672073209326,0.04557677901650357,0.0,0.06740209054415662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13110619602917695,0.0,0.13973078343217935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04046382165591539,0.05445386121346957,0.0,0.0,0.061682327982841366,0.06359566015255502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04873359663725354,0.0,0.0,0.0441780770996868
mentalhealth,_Jane00Doe_,2020/01/16,"Getting better, where to begin? To make a long story short, I'm 18. I graduated a little over half a year ago and I'm terrified going forward. 

I was severely bullied throughout my elementary and high school years, I lost the few ""friends"" I had when one of their boyfriends got handsy with me at a New Year's Party, and I have a strained relationship with my family, especially my parents, due to years of taking abuse at school and not knowing another outlet took it out at home. 

I moved to a different program part way through my grad year and I was able to catch up and graduate on time. It was a big help to me being in the program, but there's an overall feeling I can't rid of. 

I can't figure out how to let go of everything that happened and move forward. I'm always angry and sad and it comes out as a lack of effort and disinterest in partaking in my everyday life. I can't connect with people because I'm immediately standoffish at best and hostile at worst with new people, I don't like them. The problem is I don't really have anything to be upset about.... And I can't pinpoint why I'm feeling this way. 

At the moment, I'm on good terms with my parents, I'm not in school anymore, I'm working and I enjoy my job, I'm travelling. There's nothing in my life that I can see that would justify me feeling this way. To be honest, I thought I'd be dead by now, I didn't think I was going to make it this far in life. And now I'm here, practically an adult, and I'm going to be on my own because I'm not a kid anymore. 

I just don't know where to begin. What's wrong with me and why I can't just be happy.",4.5108529411764735,4.2315101441176495,6.206470588235295,80.84411764705884,69.61764705882354,9.15294117647059,31.411764705882355,8.841846274778883,2.3684588235294126,1259,49,271,20,20,437,164,340,0.16699999999999998,0.748,0.085,-0.9837,4,0,0,0,1,1,38.0,0,0,2,5,12,16,1,2,15,0,26,3,0,3,0,46,61,20,1,3,6,2,3,1,1,1,3,0,1,2,11,26,0,0,8,1,0,12,12,8,0,2,10,4,35,8,47,43,7,61,0,2,1,0,9,29,0,0,22,173,46,10,0.10032133160318747,0.1188643732842344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889288074234478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834753844681668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10519566336398237,0.0,0.0,0.19898360760881775,0.0,0.0,0.08255590797799471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230990519273616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528104818324092,0.08872606527648065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641794411837131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481443921833952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901623440881406,0.0,0.094574023065617,0.0,0.15217643873194314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750801193879979,0.0,0.05241375515240038,0.0,0.22805969862434194,0.08414477323541439,0.08023613341112174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871382222041317,0.10679392295917416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724327389070509,0.10599499486207983,0.10063047529939764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955344178075304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110267960439266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025853585424282,0.2125797700967388,0.04901193519512365,0.10054832962585417,0.0,0.0887812215406214,0.0,0.0,0.10951258425316113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13393053570606875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132513978033659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19378193440828825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096261023354534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798033063078865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22278993303235586,0.108638225883855,0.0,0.13910035939997234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599396565247444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06426841389951203,0.0,0.0,0.10770756593155137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30459163044810983,0.07994311264115213,0.0,0.0,0.113334549379857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542915622183198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428185849349527,0.0,0.07964393129144859,0.05849817522059653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114606907116436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23889121035897776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810487955738688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303512422841324,0.0,0.0,0.07126539561128473,0.10968562740161107,0.0,0.3230182419419772
mentalhealth,lizzieley,2020/01/16,"NEED HELP/ADVICE PLEASE! behaviour+attitude Whenever I become depressed or my mood gets really low I’ve noticed my behaviour and attitude changes. I’m not as nice to my friends I lash out and am snappy and say things I don’t mean and only realise I’ve said them after. I’m not sure what causes this or if it’s just a normal thing in times like these, but I’m really scared it’s going to start affecting my relationships with my family and friends I always feel super shitty and apologise afterwards but I feel like it doesn’t make up for it which makes me feel even worse and I always feel like everyone’s going to realise how shit I am and are going to start edging away from me slowly which I think might just possibly destroy me. 

I really need advice or just some guidance on this I’m not sure if this is normal (for this situation) or if it’s something else/more I should or need to be aware of.",2.310280830280832,4.5985442527472555,3.9137728937728937,85.01178266178266,79.0,7.341147741147741,21.649572649572647,8.344100000000001,1.3555777777777775,722,21,142,15,18,240,103,182,0.166,0.706,0.128,-0.8177,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,1,5,15,2,1,1,0,9,1,1,5,2,47,31,20,0,9,16,0,4,3,2,2,0,2,0,0,15,10,0,0,6,0,0,3,5,5,0,0,1,6,19,9,17,27,1,14,0,2,0,0,6,6,1,10,8,88,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428164181283123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067592145330289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167297993343796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721593985920974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276311413083961,0.1314319567868903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700977389515733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206091567348799,0.0,0.0,0.11871891178504912,0.0,0.0,0.1171246520687331,0.0,0.25128270761583105,0.17751755233199346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19197869851793453,0.0,0.06491151202885134,0.0,0.21182941139458056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327704377075056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18209564331300454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586549760147926,0.0,0.0,0.13533636720345216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318015239975413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763724361482763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24346229296493574,0.0,0.14145076524495434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449192331676454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13638081637716706,0.0,0.14006460790838274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387785368430516,0.0,0.0,0.1333898122970876,0.0,0.0,0.11818294803333936,0.09880252181122626,0.12438828972830625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12753301057420022,0.0,0.13965363291350133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564784874398533,0.0,0.0,0.17587878230147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341939325935128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16508222407132664,0.07960949599403669,0.0,0.0,0.07244672688412986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661359250972498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,diligentpuppy,2020/01/16,"How can I help my boyfriend understand my mental health issues? I posted some of this on another sub for something else but is basically an example of what I mean; 

 My boyfriends license was suspended so he cant drive to work. I work on campus which is where he works. He asked me if I would be able to pick him up and drop him off because he lives on the way, but it is about 15 -25 mins extra.

It wouldnt be a big deal and I would do it BUT....I have severe anxiety and last year I got in 2 accidents (not at fault) and since ive been scared to drive and developed a tick where I squint my eyes tight/long and tense/strain my neck/shoulder muscles, so I am also constantly in pain from tensing it when it gets bad. and triggered by stress/driving which is unsafe and dont drive when its bad, however most of the time I am okay but just stressed and have painful tension, but is not affecting my driving, but i only drive what i need to...extra time is just more time being in pain and stressed. 

I go to class/work on campus which is 45 minutes away. I only drive when I have to. I see doctors and say its caused by stress and have tried things to help, they say I can drive unless I feel it is very bad and going to affect my driving (which sometimes it will so I choose not to drive that day/call out of work) so i do not put others on the road in danger. He understood but yesterday he called asking me to drive him and i told him i cant and he says ""It's only 5 mins out of your way not a big deal"" I told him imagine only being able to hold your breath for 3 mins and then say you needa do it 5 mins longer, you CANT. This is how I feel to drive. It goes away when I dont drive for abit.

He tells me that he told people and he said that they said what im doing is fucked up, when of course, he didn't tell them my situation other than just ""not feeling like it"". With that being said, he did this to himself and refuses to take responsibility! he got his license revoked, multiple tickets/accidents/car stolen, why should i pay for his mistakes?

So he ends up ubering to me so I could drop him off at campus next day and said I didnt need to go to his work, just park. I agree even though he wanted me to pick him up to begin with to avoid taking uber twice which he did anyways. We leave and he starts asking why I am mad and I said im upset how he acted towards me. We get there and he starts going off on me how im selfish, told me he would never do anything for me, drive me anywhere again (which he did only few times forever ago) and says how 5 mins isnt a big deal. I start crying because I feel I am constantly told it's not a big deal when im in physical pain and anxious constantly. I told him he doesnt understand which is okay, but he says he does. We park and he says ""great now I have to walk for 2 hours to get to work"" WHEN HE TOLD ME i just needed to park and he will get to his work and made me feel like shit, so I drive him to his work which was 7ish minutes away but took me 15 to get back (I hit all the lights and there was traffic on that side) and was 1 min away from being late to work. He didnt thank me just said that hed never do anything for me again and that i made this difficult for no reason, im selfish and its my fault bc I wont ""fix it"" (my twitch/anxiety). I do feel bad, at the same time I cant change it.   


I am constantly working with doctors and doing what they advice, trying new medications/new methods to combat this and help myself but it takes time and have monthly if not more appointments to try a new medication or something else and to talk about things whatever it may be. But he keeps telling me that I'm not trying because its not ""fixed"" and keeps thinking my issues are not a big deal and that im just being dramatic. And I honestly feel awful because I constantly feel I'm not being believed....that my issues are just made up and exaggerated, that it doesnt affect me ""that much"" But then in other times he will say how understanding and supportive he is of me and always seems geniuine in times  I need it, but as soon as my issues are affecting him all hell breaks lose and he tells me he still understands, but it suddenly is not a big issue and im exaggerating. It's starting to make me feel I am exaggerating and that it isn't a big deal and that its just all in my head and i dont know how to feel anymore because i cant control any of this at all so how can i be exaggerating? i dont know anymore but i just feel so helpless and that everything is  just in my head and im just an awful person/gf and just blame myself. 

Tl;dr how can i properly explain to my boyfriend of my mental health issues so he can really understand and not think im being dramatic?",3.43616757575758,3.8313685410000033,4.7740909090909085,87.8212121212121,72.09,7.940606060606061,25.45151515151516,7.949930888399369,1.1634333333333329,3671,103,838,47,66,1225,330,1000,0.177,0.795,0.027999999999999997,-0.9994,1,1,3,0,0,0,100.0,3,4,4,12,55,36,5,7,16,4,90,15,5,23,6,179,168,100,0,14,45,0,11,2,0,10,9,14,0,0,63,58,0,6,27,0,1,22,35,28,0,1,31,28,122,8,98,113,12,128,1,2,2,1,103,46,3,7,56,539,185,16,0.0722349949461639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03529360052248845,0.03201598230478947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0288831496803312,0.030052651210002137,0.0,0.0,0.024561136803457492,0.037872345243143625,0.05525957341793966,0.04080249170765402,0.07163770486443445,0.0,0.0,0.05944324602024066,0.0,0.10129495390067418,0.0,0.13573431116509704,0.027772126156730144,0.12062640704458448,0.11008445614549596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0368800030983184,0.0,0.0,0.03710261892741901,0.038207523317259566,0.0,0.0,0.1951509189617792,0.04050884454920736,0.028836882824738674,0.0,0.03967337502715453,0.04658559588824319,0.22341332388453225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739355781862151,0.03160666543021443,0.0,0.16931775219746745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603430692854186,0.0,0.031989382519946104,0.0,0.0,0.023855266448739344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032460077859125004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008830112494184,0.05160469482277393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03339004442426357,0.09434950867475374,0.0,0.08210562456803344,0.0,0.05777292425081766,0.039819668470039836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413394461131065,0.07678242176712505,0.0,0.0,0.07262639169610463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035568459695150406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3511178555815088,0.2261837024487731,0.0,0.06420578250568441,0.0,0.0,0.039698464114092266,0.02944058097873473,0.04074211031709408,0.03824321486904688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03529036980016503,0.0,0.031892411971959536,0.03196284871231355,0.0,0.040406241174318035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025257481807548,0.02410871002024637,0.0,0.0,0.0393425429553893,0.0,0.0363845789506812,0.07279588505360203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028828641901988673,0.0,0.02655051637523707,0.10712266693256604,0.05571208124866555,0.10464751236562392,0.03841136830669793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734492172523502,0.15372625513708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02503932513079634,0.0315364056766747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034590578780774935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03630806068018701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023137793722634952,0.03713480276303795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20613606552360267,0.22977666912636344,0.03615991571893226,0.0,0.02878096933788485,0.03288001322115517,0.0,0.04080249170765402,0.03707409213373361,0.029876767137653963,0.04059758042356737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055610028192109376,0.035721128522897105,0.0,0.10225660242874678,0.0,0.02884348013687668,0.0,0.16548988530851716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04098570812074423,0.0,0.0,0.08146758966521216,0.029029876362374713,0.12627313893845954,0.0332521391343928,0.0,0.0,0.0479897209146582,0.0462852680402432,0.0354852578887522,0.0,0.16848322580619893,0.0,0.0,0.2415827163181649,0.040127868627671294,0.0980856398776913,0.0,0.0,0.18799794310719425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02980071794562273,0.02130303578171605,0.05733677672600939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518084750418097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28923365149494706,0.0,0.0,0.07697050182975182,0.0,0.0,0.023258484213995533
mentalhealth,houseofkoalas,2020/01/16,"help: I need motivated out of bed I’m having some trouble self motivating and fighting the urge to stay in bed for long periods of time. I’m studying for a while away from my partner and miss him greatly. I’ve called into quite a depression and can never get out of bed before lunch.

I’m trying to get my eating/laundry/study routine down but I can’t seem to get up at a good hour and I also can’t get myself to go to the gym despite knowing it DOES improve my mood etc.

I’ve never felt such a mental block about something. Any advice is helpful",2.1597368421052643,3.9369388333333366,4.071789473684209,86.17452631578949,77.33333333333333,5.963508771929827,25.43508771929825,6.742157984588678,1.0348519298245609,433,16,87,4,10,147,79,114,0.09699999999999999,0.753,0.15,0.7966,0,0,1,0,2,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,3,7,1,0,6,0,5,1,0,2,2,18,18,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,1,7,1,1,5,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,1,8,2,20,17,2,17,0,2,0,0,7,8,0,2,7,52,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183482229966871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15015596689936214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768694846954715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17641182627230287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977457302336107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19172952346850736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617221116585177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16431481540845827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094081164025799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18028428280402367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39239880299301066,0.0,0.1067114353986524,0.15748875557422634,0.0,0.2070120775229218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517104537475163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849111511644896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319098383391408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16616651945420513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18922341620453587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922570606151194,0.28963258925898666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19971167439616871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17093461868005494,0.19588032017656185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455102100885592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20013299253927566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094875470527426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748041901405682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KoolRunningz,2020/01/16,"Coming to the realization I’ve recently came to the realization that I am at fault for relations that I’ve had going south. One way or another I’ve screwed things up, by pushing people away without realizing it at first. But when i do realize it it’s too late. I’ve thought about all the people I used to talk to but no longer do and made me think I must be the toxic person in all the relations. My mood changes on a dime. One minute I feel on top of the world and the next I feel like garbage like a roller coaster ride. I’ve had a feeling that I’m bipolar but never went to get help. Regret eats me alive especially when I have nothing on my mind just thinking of all the ways I’ve negatively impacted people because if I positively impacted people then they would reach out to me but that rarely happens. Sounds like I should probably see someone for help.",5.896647398843932,5.804427132947983,6.640236994219656,78.26856358381507,66.6878612716763,10.15699421965318,33.4849710982659,9.888512548439397,3.0553056647398846,686,28,139,14,10,227,106,173,0.057999999999999996,0.775,0.16699999999999998,0.9612,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,2,6,7,1,0,11,0,10,3,0,2,5,32,26,11,0,5,8,0,3,3,0,3,1,1,0,1,8,5,1,0,8,1,1,6,4,3,0,3,6,5,15,3,22,16,3,28,0,1,1,1,5,12,1,2,11,88,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15815091009946022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417030336031916,0.0,0.0,0.09194021027977498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17250116224815526,0.0,0.0,0.15955057830396407,0.12992053164735448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15432942987015802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22878169604652865,0.10774787512141357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828984028796853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879871483295896,0.0,0.08571610212117703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337214932534766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20218675606590505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013474567402306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22105328040067795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271222866637684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522880850749362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632388087461587,0.0,0.16040181343059592,0.0,0.0,0.14471859355979275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20440293476589247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182462989591214,0.13169269626720098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16261254305574271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891937027770075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018628540452456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779171248783805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122569482584493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002000006778866,0.19328238633669348,0.0,0.11973649687496622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302625184012924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394323183096133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981429420646913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538784654995401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714022626128232,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xDonal,2020/01/16,"Why the hell cant I be alone with my own thoughts? I try to avoid being alone with my own thoughts most of every day, whether it's with video games, podcasts, music or scrolling through media on my phone. Most nights I go to sleep watching or listening to stuff on youtube. 

Does anyone know what the cause of this might be or if there is a name for it? Can you get therapy for this?",4.425000000000002,4.8420043205128245,3.958102564102564,94.47023076923078,69.8974358974359,7.2656410256410275,28.42051282051282,6.742157984588678,0.9996020512820514,299,10,69,2,5,89,57,78,0.09300000000000001,0.863,0.044000000000000004,-0.7059,0,3,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,1,3,0,7,1,1,1,0,17,13,5,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,1,3,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,2,7,0,13,7,4,5,1,0,1,0,5,2,1,7,2,46,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4876041238528847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16459624518297522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418193097058623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15181268823595248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20599898975838346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19833355843760586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229861056625058,0.0,0.1337825066665159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293689699806932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497208222423801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22090573474630887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23556870334325214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694751942470174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26919893004126405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3737605489515805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15982026614941092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21241071392208294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mr_cafe,2020/01/16,"Feeling like I am going nowhere, left behind I've lived my life with the hope that something would eventually change, and I would finally be satisfied. However, I am now 23 and it feels like I'm not progressing towards anything that may make me happy. I usually have periods where I feel like trying something new and get out of my comfort zone, and periods like this one when I look back and feel like it was all for nothing.

I think that one of my main weaknesses has always been the absence of experience in some key aspects of life, especially relationships. I never had a girlfriend. I am not bad-looking, but very insecure when dealing with girls in a romantic way (mainly because of the aforementioned lack of experience). I would even go as far to say that my behavior may sometimes be considered asexual - even though I am not. Furthermore, the situation I am in right now (and who knows, perhaps also in the future) does not allow me to meet new people that easily, especially girls (I study computer engineering so yeah... lol).

I feel like this lack of experience also influences other aspects of my life. I don't feel on par with most of the people my age. I feel a not-so-much adult in an adult world, alienated, left behind. This vicious cycle will eventually get worse and worse, as people go on with their life while things will get harder and harder for me to turn around.

That said, I tried to change things - perhaps not hard enough. I asked out a girl I barely knew via DM, she eventually said yes. This was my first date of my life. It went well, or at least it seemed to me, we laughed a lot and I personally had fun. But then she said she was not interested when I asked for a second date a few days later. Thing is, she is literally the only one I could have asked out that I somewhat know. This was one month ago.

And now I am in one of those periods in my life where I feel like this is not going anywhere. I hope it's not true, but it's been like this for all these years. The hypothesis that this may be my life until the end gets more and more realistic as time goes on.

I went to therapy for most of my life - from when I was a child up until 2 years ago, when I was 21. I never had the courage to state that never having been in a relationship was a problem for me. It was something I was ashamed to express my desire of. In general, I never managed to talk freely about my problems there because of this.

I quit therapy after realizing that, after all these years, I was not happy with my life. I agree that it sounds simplistic, but I also wanted to try and live without it and see how I would fare. I still am on my meds though (prescribed from a doctor).

I would love to hear some valuable, intelligent advice on one or more topics I've talked about in this post.

I would also like to chat with people if interested, as I tend to lose touch with people I know during these periods.",5.280336052836057,5.763948358391608,6.161212121212124,79.18959595959599,68.03846153846155,9.502408702408703,29.35042735042736,9.516144504307137,2.4487376068376068,2279,77,455,45,36,754,249,572,0.087,0.769,0.14400000000000002,0.9846,1,0,3,0,0,0,73.0,1,0,1,4,27,30,1,2,22,3,46,12,0,4,8,94,87,41,0,16,17,0,10,9,1,11,11,6,0,7,39,25,0,0,15,1,0,6,15,7,1,8,22,18,68,23,77,50,19,81,0,1,2,1,32,29,0,15,52,338,107,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055264456305374667,0.10026440085245998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18090662781239145,0.04705791999310382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04653957974962092,0.05034554393609265,0.15861262299469273,0.0,0.0,0.04348696165238262,0.04722069088092967,0.06895026323740741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11965443999162705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04515421003406926,0.0,0.0,0.03647300913355688,0.05830526258335929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057885983147017914,0.04949127192375002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050090549174290656,0.05843597298030434,0.0,0.0747074999882428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16596361936549467,0.0,0.0,0.22876545700452566,0.2424155110245725,0.0,0.0619527502982416,0.0,0.04810527532851557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11818968248971068,0.0,0.128565026922497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120406750190626,0.05066177255573458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374109339561222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234286714582542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324271268494476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289337829443647,0.0,0.3595153904506871,0.2486672886662743,0.0,0.09987741583771384,0.0,0.09498316462228228,0.06327008060341377,0.0,0.0480806599875329,0.05104269364507606,0.0,0.03775060440897497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06281936094901118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04514130599173605,0.0,0.041574104947708204,0.0,0.1744734362189283,0.10924148266692472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054265620509952935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299369794084628,0.04301228728767958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19603903669806114,0.04938125574455491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05416363027030072,0.0,0.0,0.10823014195801768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0601527303506889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143685357188765,0.0,0.04829728069653272,0.16138899711907,0.04497445182320377,0.0,0.0,0.04506665794515316,0.051485142549365315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356968901465833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130615377618044,0.05593390068475597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04516454043003302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091281762293664,0.0,0.0,0.12935012413295155,0.0,0.112716999484313,0.036237875072602864,0.11112912567978646,0.0,0.03297741563949521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115190490888386,0.0615151154536628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06228685202387229,0.04666343049146472,0.03335734163422417,0.04489037311518472,0.0,0.0,0.05084933659540068,0.10485327758717378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05451657256729334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11526784564003642,0.24104839813453885,0.0,0.0,0.10925783701959704
mentalhealth,looopylooo,2020/01/16,"I'm a very fortunate person I'm 18 years old. I graduated highschool and through connection, landed a job as a line cook at a brand new restaurant and bar. My boss offered me and of course other employees rooms for rent. So I'm 18 living in a small town, averaging between 250-300$ a week and my only bills are rent (250$) and and my phone bill (50$). I'm so lucky to have what I have right now and I couldn't possibly ask for more. I'm really great full. But I'm not happy. I just can't seem to enjoy anything when I'm alone. I go to work with amazing people and enjoy every last bit of it. I hang out with room mates and appear to enjoy it. However, when I'm alone I'm so bored, I can't enjoy anything, and life seems so pointless. The only reason I get through my weekends is because of pot and cigarettes.

Am I just a negative person? Weak minded? Depressed? What's wrong with me?",0.3763381716322911,2.5408241229946533,2.8379373567608885,90.57634581105171,85.84491978609627,5.7009421950598425,20.669467787114847,7.07126945348624,0.5690098803157628,689,22,149,10,21,237,110,187,0.18100000000000002,0.737,0.08199999999999999,-0.9392,5,2,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,1,9,12,0,0,8,0,8,4,0,2,0,27,23,19,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,4,2,5,15,2,0,3,3,4,3,5,4,0,0,0,0,15,8,19,22,3,22,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,4,9,80,20,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3456862839218107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746652432342257,0.0,0.1560154994567131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10173190714791888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821958421149079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373831477703752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14060830792721285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719083322050389,0.0,0.09484492710575576,0.0,0.0,0.1839919529647759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776528145831631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16560819795479315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603403038803896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178762281431955,0.0,0.0,0.1473630341220208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16850687292789274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611791434806775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511835431886172,0.0,0.0,0.25384802384312755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569745577368445,0.29143612153911125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881384285549692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691118278713982,0.17158618205156226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251938265700484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30385274807698265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13769809004545147,0.0,0.0,0.1338655545196404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149469766710135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18246319535115813,0.0,0.10746884888690704
mentalhealth,thiskiddoxx,2020/01/16,"lack of love , i need to feel something i keep feeling the need of a family , i need to belong , u know ths is a cry for help 

calling someone ""dad"" is now a dream , sometimes i get violent  to the point where i might really turn into a serial killer or do  a mass shooting 

why others get it and i dont , what did i do wrong to not have a good life with my parents?

i wish my parents never abused me , i wish they care about me for real 

help",6.905212765957447,3.6447445212766003,8.011170212765958,79.48250000000002,66.55319148936171,11.102127659574473,33.074468085106375,8.841846274778883,2.440795744680852,331,9,77,4,4,115,64,94,0.18100000000000002,0.588,0.231,0.51,2,0,1,1,1,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,3,5,1,0,8,0,8,2,0,0,1,18,22,2,0,6,2,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,2,14,3,11,20,1,6,0,0,0,1,8,4,0,2,2,51,17,0,0.0,0.1898561372429053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16362118046170762,0.0,0.16337358667847093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17601420578891006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877980488085677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151058371879213,0.0,0.16204255903177575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16743575583971929,0.0,0.0,0.1344002510950426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214808657694732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14242712911440547,0.0,0.0,0.08806275779787948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318102273880913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14462128690975326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699874729581595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35644392106583056,0.12358562546190333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35585125242686017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15147695047725762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18238622193776716,0.10265273330060104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576935877578314,0.12335924205381447,0.1584797376713696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17429321467968756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445901073231597,0.0,0.3685321849074714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751953840680074,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nysportsfan0220,2020/01/16,"Mot sure if I’m developing a mental illness Over the last few months, I’ve noticed these symptoms in myself:
  Decreased memory
  Decreased attention span
  Worse speech skills
  Difficulty focusing and thinking
  Increased anxiety/stress
  Trouble sleeping
  Irritability
  Trouble waking up
  Decreased motivation, drive
  Decreased organization
  Lack of emotional response
I drink occasionally, a couple times a month, and don’t do any drugs. I am not on any medications.
I have not visited a doctor or mental health professional to this point.

If anyone could provide some help or advice for me, I would greatly appreciate it. Much love to you all.",7.897777777777778,11.03801330769231,8.091666666666669,57.631111111111146,64.96153846153845,10.391452991452992,39.44017094017094,10.504223727775694,5.389396581196581,520,29,66,15,9,169,84,104,0.16,0.6809999999999999,0.16,-0.0018,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,2,0,5,0,0,5,0,6,10,2,1,2,17,9,6,0,5,6,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,3,2,1,0,3,1,0,3,3,2,0,0,0,1,7,3,8,7,6,13,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,5,4,42,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556955020737444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443608856748505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256280860266034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434503273106453,0.19879929260621546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18389787403816726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760062998339594,0.20835791039835175,0.0,0.0,0.20210238642346035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19808467198570595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19097874761881306,0.0,0.0,0.1204277143212312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14645345002380047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215744012969271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18099666982929294,0.3621262950393792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28681866496429376,0.0,0.13207669800658908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20455327874429147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698443918796839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17979781553268706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058091573072364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16933502159236793,0.18674390947439612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151240390715498,0.0,0.0,0.10476589145896884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830971040461144,0.12763103589534833,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DoingRandomCrap31,2020/01/16,"How do I deal with burnout as a highschooler? As of late, I (16F) have been doing rather poorly in school. By which I mean I am failing many of my classes because I've stopped doing my homework. And it's not really a problem of not understanding, as I am intelligent enough to be in almost all Honors or AP courses. I didn't know why I'm suddenly doing so poorly at school until fairly recently, but after some searching around, I've figured out I'm practically a textbook case of burnout, and I display a disturbing amount of listed symptoms. Unfortunately, these same sources tell me that the best way to deal with burnout is prevention (Kinda too late for that.) After that, they tell me to get more sleep (I can't really fall asleep before 11 and I have to get up at 6,) more exercise (Never been an athletic person, never will be,) take a vacation (Parents would never let me stay home unless I have the flu or something,) change my personal goals (I'm legally obligated to go to school,) or say no if you're overwhelmed (Have you tried telling a teacher to you'd rather not take a test?) I'm out of ideas, could I maybe get some advice here?",5.033423019431988,5.9657276188340855,5.923695067264577,79.07179073243651,68.77578475336323,8.816621823617341,31.010164424514198,9.029198982220553,2.585370343796712,901,36,171,16,15,297,138,223,0.083,0.85,0.067,-0.6643,1,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,2,1,7,7,6,0,2,10,0,22,5,2,1,4,39,35,15,0,6,11,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,2,2,6,8,0,2,5,1,2,2,9,4,0,0,3,1,20,2,32,25,9,23,0,2,0,0,12,8,0,8,11,118,26,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946890511167095,0.0,0.0,0.12242352445597235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883536025507877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07452721882051196,0.0,0.1040323812678326,0.0,0.12830201614891354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12933253933197186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976129033848478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520848425466179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263249867603093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916239601343261,0.0,0.06948192395674327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12263453954660952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801417251532286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06718968838704316,0.0,0.2758242423252177,0.0,0.0,0.12501688153260498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395021791140334,0.1228243905167843,0.13317458297275034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828782519948425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575281629026786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21350158677911885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169842012771922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664295179980645,0.0,0.1207148260975917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972243079281538,0.0,0.371194255404442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234609098097507,0.0,0.0,0.09412002576936343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303105456027351,0.0,0.10221299335401247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12707266365282294,0.18384529764233384,0.0,0.3205761121845444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300501953533201,0.0,0.0,0.12727467922663008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970425493103772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103186465859937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684843185321996,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway42010069,2020/01/16,Teen Depression In the last 2 years I haven’t felt myself I’m 17m I got really bad anxiety I can’t talk to girls I’m really upset in life I don’t go to high school anymore because it became such a difficult place to go I tried alternatives high schools I still failed I’m 2 years behind now it’s stresses the fuck outta me also I found my way into psychedelics after smoking weed everyday since I was 13 because it made my anxiety and depression vanish and helped me make friends and sleep but now it’s back full force even with weed use I’m really lonely because all my friends left because I’m weird I’m truly in spot that all I wanna do it vanish not die i hate the unknown so death isn’t a option for me I just feel really broken and lost also my vocabulary and spelling and memory is going down hill everything I feel like I accomplished doesn’t feel good anymore I just feel so shitty constantly like I go to bed thinking I’ll wake up different yet I’m still distressed and depressed the next day honestly what does the world have to offer if I’m just upset and miserable my mom says only I can change how I perceive the world even tho I meditate and try my best to stay healthy everything’s just sad to me should I go to psych ward or will I just be the same after I get out?,0.8945149253731373,3.3082007462686605,2.998638059701495,88.48064365671644,86.31343283582089,6.484328358208956,21.434701492537318,7.756953410329674,1.1608597014925373,1032,35,211,21,32,348,150,268,0.222,0.628,0.15,-0.9576,1,2,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,4,20,24,2,5,9,0,13,4,2,4,2,39,41,18,2,3,9,1,5,2,2,2,1,1,1,1,7,12,0,0,8,0,0,5,6,17,0,0,6,6,32,7,21,32,5,36,0,8,0,1,8,14,1,3,17,120,39,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16503082061403326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786942990767736,0.0,0.20465962596756465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934136028389471,0.08615349763882599,0.251597603940159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082841958771503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915393571101784,0.0,0.0,0.11150416992706533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654450088822815,0.0,0.2666141081459034,0.0,0.10708766673152892,0.10780427686584372,0.0,0.0,0.09029614135839063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363028008224041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854684598312611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20868970669639136,0.0737139580377776,0.0990718642400046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313483708770103,0.1594378644905155,0.09539102370521063,0.05390886040288286,0.0,0.293206392599504,0.08654500752313388,0.08252487353272868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187185352670354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916139197938816,0.21803701584859486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410791918554321,0.0,0.0,0.11210863478696984,0.0,0.07288120657958742,0.10082000668818934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11263643674636124,0.0,0.0,0.09763425240207198,0.06887545580419192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12084668616698335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973629439172608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847532346834338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780427686584372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644066957728612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205526553451382,0.0,0.2088534156472174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535404643523066,0.0,0.10325752063951288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997935237843404,0.16480415913901614,0.0,0.11819578144201227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293458939606355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611550204498187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401089720011651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911698541162033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190186509420556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289294202868962
mentalhealth,queenlillyyy,2020/01/16,"1 step forward 1000 steps back... 2 and half months ago I jinxed myself! I posted on here that I was finally happy I had a new job which was social and I was finally going to be out of the house for more than 30 minutes on a regular basis! 


Now I feel the same as I did 3 months ago! Close to tears wanting to give up, wanting to scream at everyone! I have so many emotions that have been building up but I kept telling myself I was happy for forced all the shit that’s been going on to the back of my head. 

My hours have been cut at work I’ve had the last 7 days off and only got a total of 15 hours in total for the whole week, and it’s been like this for a few weeks now. But having all this time off I’ve been over thinking and worrying about money, stressing about finding a new job, Heath problems that I should probably see a doctor about but I’m too scared. Arguing with my dad’s girlfriend 🙄 finding out over Facebook that my dad is now engaged again! 

All this has been building up and I have no one to share it with my friends are away at uni and I’m stuck in the house all day when I’m not working because I can’t actually afford go anywhere, I know that keeping all this stuff in my head is unhealthy so I just needed a bit of a rant, thank you if you read this far x",2.9187379946215906,3.542455587591242,4.159757971571263,90.92463887821744,73.4160583941606,6.9363042643104125,25.369957741068,6.8360192770164,0.7882802919708025,997,30,229,8,19,328,151,274,0.163,0.7509999999999999,0.085,-0.9697,3,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,0,2,15,14,3,2,15,0,25,4,3,0,7,38,44,15,0,6,6,2,1,1,2,1,1,1,0,0,15,12,0,2,5,1,1,6,3,7,0,2,16,3,25,7,40,26,12,51,0,0,1,0,11,22,1,1,25,158,40,6,0.0,0.0,0.10835417945949777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968517222846792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043210726427437,0.17075817988073652,0.0,0.06768592818022429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122150296655887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14321682678602174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364906568783248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248994721142914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609873649245588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05614265111508633,0.0,0.0,0.2432669121401789,0.2029680251420455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857853944243452,0.0,0.0,0.1065149254509016,0.18931131159286796,0.0,0.08880486261462024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23639772390007074,0.0,0.0,0.2279079638657596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21869429097467125,0.25623905051097445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203702831703732,0.0986930429508386,0.0,0.0,0.061021952711931525,0.09050837509143868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424611065413473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257210023736086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17725421495768964,0.0,0.0,0.0823310732771469,0.0,0.2144766619566196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524021491951463,0.08444714933710591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634087286462536,0.0,0.11971455010796145,0.1062455351371522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110650850106776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116544260889058,0.0,0.08848054901532143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397587022614282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318623760906348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271902601392393,0.0,0.12710855286885342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704951671360178,0.10222614436658696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07114676853727889,0.0,0.0,0.06474542320045266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098268369843566,0.0,0.1781312188681924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396665391445927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16166965922729612,0.11276147020059918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sowhatofyou,2020/01/16,Self worth My therapist gave me like a work sheet to fill in based around positive self talk and I'm really struggling with it. I remember a while back I had a crisis over being a worthless human being but I've kind of gotten past that and to the point where it doesn't phase me because it's so ingrained into my personality if that makes sense. Like there's not a chance I could be anything else but worthless and its just a normal thing I've accepted about myself :/ any advice on baby steps?,5.66,5.925431515151516,6.2207575757575775,79.85113636363639,67.18181818181819,9.024242424242424,27.61111111111111,8.841846274778883,1.9543050505050503,396,11,77,6,6,129,74,99,0.155,0.733,0.113,-0.6377,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,1,7,0,6,0,0,1,0,16,10,8,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,7,6,0,0,2,0,1,2,2,3,0,0,3,0,8,4,10,3,0,12,0,2,0,0,6,7,0,1,5,51,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117207184514294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733836879857165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782953080470106,0.1928761349623717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16660058525567695,0.0,0.13207584264806516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172987891832207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809942566575582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22562132526433398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117013378600104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14462433219788268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21228388088292266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20682948855411434,0.0,0.18918190177244448,0.0,0.0,0.2048167044412829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138799959137517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454371081665664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4520538269647773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265033625391159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17414562949115595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515626115138277,0.14394136670557292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15773335054382293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DONOTTOUCHYOURDICK,2020/01/16,"My social life is so bad. I want to have friends and connect with people I have 0 motivation energy or desire to go out and be social. Ever. I work full time and go to college so I am doing reasonably good as far as setting myself up for the future, but when it comes to social life and doing things, I do nothing. I’ve seen maybe 1 or 2 friends this past month. 

Whenever I am with people I just get completely wrapped in my own mind and headspace. I therefore don’t carry on conversations and just stick with thinking about things rather than talking to people. I have made 2 new friends in the past 2 or 3 years. 

What do you guys suggest I do?",4.040602205258693,4.877967648854965,5.0393384223918565,84.85805767599663,70.98473282442748,7.654283290924512,28.29601357082273,7.793537801064563,1.6310553011026294,506,18,104,6,9,166,83,131,0.022000000000000002,0.8290000000000001,0.149,0.9177,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,2,8,5,0,0,2,0,13,2,0,4,1,27,21,15,0,3,7,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,5,11,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,2,1,14,4,18,18,2,20,0,0,1,0,11,7,0,3,9,71,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849648361677118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256752111218464,0.16135671640577812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392074738849814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35669831470369223,0.0,0.08040415290622015,0.0,0.17492494886715154,0.12908041398307704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238094122772022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21740217225966796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14561983503923012,0.0,0.0,0.15460891845887356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553907891025542,0.0,0.12283808173059428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486334287566646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14766707743420904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938217239837117,0.32007570915265793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823041377959898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4706318654093288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369553645135264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044829333266838,0.09861015232315974,0.0,0.0,0.08973782190372781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077167281625208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112037904533104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910378693945464
mentalhealth,livingradiation,2020/01/16,Is it possible to develop schizophrenia consciously? I'm studying psychology and I'd like to know if there have been cases of schizophrenia that was developed consciously by a patient or person.,7.191818181818181,10.374166363636368,7.293939393939392,62.3609090909091,67.18181818181819,11.672727272727276,41.30303030303031,11.20814326018867,6.331775757575759,162,10,21,6,3,52,29,33,0.0,0.9209999999999999,0.079,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,6,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,15,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425455917150965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045095288900829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5442355004988271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7026693279263622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SirSaltyThe1st,2020/01/16,"Living with a mental illness I wrote [this article](https://medium.com/@sirsalty/living-with-a-mental-illness-c6466888afd2) about my experiences living with bipolar and I hope it helps someone else suffering with mental illness. 

>Although it’s still a rather taboo subject.. many of us suffer from mental illness. The problem lies in the stigma surrounding it, and many don’t like being put in a categorical box.  
>  
>As a man especially; you can feel as though reaching out and putting yourself in a vulnerable situation is a sign of weakness.  
>  
>The thing is it actually takes an immense amount of courage to do so.

Many thanks for reading and I'd love to hear what you guys have to say.",6.101900826446282,9.013539685950416,5.57107438016529,74.71297520661159,69.49586776859505,7.375206611570247,32.48760330578513,8.296473431620573,2.78519173553719,566,26,89,9,11,173,83,121,0.187,0.66,0.153,-0.5456,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,2,0,0,5,9,0,0,9,0,7,6,0,0,0,16,14,7,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,5,2,0,2,7,8,0,1,2,1,0,2,1,4,0,0,1,3,6,5,17,12,1,8,0,2,0,1,10,5,0,1,2,54,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.13842532383397405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849763237977655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387567052685686,0.0,0.0,0.07172371845987373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404539902927491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598754740997795,0.0,0.09507919264727936,0.0,0.0,0.14088924577424775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930083796942074,0.0,0.2505126341308497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12802533516624748,0.0,0.0,0.4314414868284444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.571806514185823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573147506295866,0.0,0.2851972415624581,0.0,0.0,0.1418885772190976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280496496954286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944555746032524,0.0,0.0,0.1201892061258093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328174540299375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066536898143002,0.0,0.0,0.13059659727784512,0.0,0.0,0.09423896355115262,0.0,0.13936709199573338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17062831366992048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,quisannae,2020/01/16,"I don’t know how to get along with mum. My mother and my siblings and I always had many difficulties. But since my brother and my sister moved out and don’t keep much contact with her, I have to live with her. She is a very immature person. She is constantly lying about where she is going and so on. I never know whether I should say something or not, because she will either not respond or respond with  smth like ‘Yeah I do what I want’ or with actually something understanding ir with something like that makes me wish I have never said anything, because it made her sad. On one side she  looks out for me and on the other side she makes fun of me in front of other or tells them my secrets or makes fun of my anxiety or OCD. But  when I complain about it she apologises and says that she’s sorry for being a bad mum (and so again and again). I feel bad, because I feel like I am sorta not appreciating her. She can be very careless and also very compassionate. I feel kind of torn apart. She never provided any safety and ignored that my stepfather abused me. Only when I confronted her she suddenly did something even though she saw me getting hurt. And I still don’t know if she actually wants to change herself (which didn’t occur) or if she just plays the victim or whether I am ungrateful. I love her and I would just like to see things clearer 

I hope someone could tell me how these things look like from a different perspective and maybe could give me some advice. 

Thanks a lot
(Please excuse any grammar mistakes etc. and I never done anything like this before so idk how this is actually working :D )",4.763471861471864,5.894847311111113,5.315360750360753,82.4563311688312,69.53968253968254,8.012987012987013,28.60389610389611,8.296473431620573,1.9030952380952373,1273,45,248,18,22,409,164,315,0.147,0.718,0.135,-0.27,1,0,4,0,1,0,27.0,0,0,1,1,19,24,2,0,6,1,24,1,0,7,4,77,51,39,0,11,20,5,3,6,0,3,0,3,0,1,14,24,0,2,8,1,0,3,11,10,0,1,7,10,56,14,26,37,5,24,0,2,4,1,42,10,0,14,17,185,70,1,0.0,0.1109245032728551,0.2740791225120697,0.0,0.0,0.09148447296033864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486795585664346,0.07789941848681868,0.0,0.0,0.12732974944505088,0.0,0.07161911614730472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15408272187328648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563377370146963,0.17120982221996545,0.0,0.0796638050897055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903764654365993,0.0,0.0,0.10117006315390432,0.0,0.14949605526130966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781307287352896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580586101553452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441115287385763,0.06183518955513737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420113984516482,0.06688221431435475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978252708411192,0.08980892553059915,0.053206457257738905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298587807412886,0.0,0.0,0.10022224760501594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321384169625838,0.0,0.09749092191540022,0.1543534669053616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27442829583394823,0.0,0.08266825876350113,0.0,0.1572346013423006,0.0,0.0,0.07959245657351934,0.08449579058179701,0.08858559718405885,0.18747642042504475,0.09491608170631928,0.09405396845815013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950334452618463,0.06882154162383389,0.0,0.288822353917116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343939903265232,0.07120230065394402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174545554103183,0.0,0.1027667503238824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905414878507739,0.14890091378048326,0.0,0.0,0.07460309439062061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744350972651412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932400237664992,0.2882932908600848,0.0,0.10480003115530202,0.0,0.0,0.07476512851055843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365617836967133,0.08619280488471089,0.0,0.0,0.124394061824149,0.0,0.09198126764498506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09746182020636047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23173914829328765,0.11043911485900833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076584885391922,0.0,0.0,0.06815654390517474,0.0,0.0,0.06650502913789187,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ivagen,2020/01/16,"I don’t know Right now I have two diferente modes. One is just a big empty void with no feelings. The other is all my feelings at the same time. And I haven’t feel like this for a long time. 

With the void I have started to reflect. And realised that everything I do is to feel scared or get a adrenaline rush. And when I look at every text I have written. The only teams are death, dystopias or fleeing.

I don’t know what to do. My life feels pointless but worth living. I’m trying to look at further but everything is foggy my mind is blurry.",0.7084065934065933,3.0243940714285737,2.0985714285714323,95.36181318681322,85.96428571428572,4.5175824175824175,21.115384615384613,5.8734145424116955,0.048170879120879466,424,14,91,3,13,136,68,112,0.087,0.873,0.04,-0.4404,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,7,0,14,1,0,0,1,21,27,8,1,0,5,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,8,1,1,2,4,1,0,2,1,7,11,1,10,26,2,14,0,0,2,0,1,6,0,2,7,61,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17018471199001886,0.0,0.3630699490179287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5106593409450843,0.14430120900898666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055310817585724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220160931921758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14267102870908666,0.09868177781163183,0.0,0.178360268249681,0.1787541900363185,0.3392403093159896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039516303148829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687318927852074,0.15362197818830706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249777376620792,0.0,0.0,0.20222654445782087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14296907878532306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355631911501897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13713748787178764,0.0,0.1973142133129771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tDCS-NSSI-Research,2020/01/16,"Treatment for Self-Injury through Research Study Thank you to the moderators of /r/MentalHealth for allowing me to post here!

I am part of a team of researchers at New York State Psychiatric Institute/Columbia University who are currently recruiting participants for a research study looking at an investigational treatment for self-injury called transcranial direct current stimulation, or tDCS. tDCS is a non- invasive, well-tolerated form of brain stimulation that delivers a low current to a specific area of the brain using electrodes. Research has shown that tDCS can help reduce negative emotions and may help treat depression and other conditions.

We are seeking individuals between the ages of 18-65 who self-injure (through burning, cutting, or other means). The study involves completing a baseline psychological assessment, questionnaires, two neuroimaging sessions, and six sessions of tDCS during three visits over one week. This is a double-blind trial, so you may be randomly assigned to receive an active or an inactive form of tDCS.
Three months of treatment visits with a psychiatrist for medication management will then be offered after AT NO COST to you. Compensation of $150 is provided for time and effort if you are eligible and complete all research procedures.

If you are interested, please contact Young at 646-774-7603, or at young.cho@nyspi.columbia.edu. More information is also available at https://tdcsresearch.wordpress.com/. It is better to reach out to us directly through these channels rather than sending me a message here.

The researchers on this team have no conflicts of interest to declare. All study procedures have been approved by the Institutional Review Board for New York State Psychiatric Institute.

---

Some details about confidentiality and the use of your personal information:

If you consent to participate in this research, your personal information will be kept confidential and will not be released without your written permission except as described in this section or as required by law. Your name or other identifying information will not be made known if the results of this study are published for scientific purposes.

To make your personal research results not be identifiable with you if they are used for publication in the scientific literature and presentation at scientific meetings, we will remove all your identifying information, including name and date of birth.
Scan results, questionnaire answers, and data collected during the task may be used in future studies, and if shared with other investigators, information that identifies the scan, questionnaire responses, or task data with you will be removed before hand. There is a potential risk of loss of confidentiality from such data sharing, but this is extremely low as only de-identified data from this study may be shared.

Clinical records, including your name and other personal identifying information, and research data will be kept in secure storage at the New York State Psychiatric Institute. Information in paper format will be kept in locked files. Electronic data, including MRI images, will be protected by a firewall (programming that makes it virtually impossible to access the data from outside the New York State Psychiatric Institute) and by restricting access within the New York State Psychiatric Institute through use of a password known only to authorized personnel. If information is transmitted electronically, it will be encrypted so that your identifying information remains confidential.

Records will be available to research staff, and to Federal, State, and Institutional regulatory personnel (who may review records as part of routine audits). Your information will also be available to other authorized individuals, including those at the New York State Psychiatric Institute. There are also legal advocacy organizations that have the authority under New York State law to have access to otherwise confidential subject records, although they cannot disclose this information without your consent.

Your MRI will be interpreted and the results will be shared with you or a physician who you may designate.

---

Again, if you are interested, please contact Young at 646-774-7603, or at young.cho@nyspi.columbia.edu. More information is also available at https://tdcsresearch.wordpress.com/. It is better to reach out to us directly through these channels rather than sending me a message here.

Thank you for your time!",14.490560344827585,14.105137941091956,12.881293103448277,41.44926724137935,49.61781609195402,16.171264367816093,52.497126436781606,14.643508229474929,8.329372988505746,3701,214,433,130,32,1179,288,696,0.031,0.884,0.085,0.9857,3,0,0,0,0,0,113.0,4,24,2,8,16,19,1,1,35,0,64,8,3,16,3,108,80,47,0,10,26,0,1,0,0,20,5,0,0,4,31,26,0,8,18,4,2,7,9,6,0,5,6,4,34,13,101,37,11,69,0,4,3,0,76,29,0,25,24,339,65,25,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26053427853108985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930585905079863,0.0,0.0,0.144067463653532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18184478560538608,0.08316704640758006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17079239563520895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015064827845886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161752181889292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10918514065743898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839542189999027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706763323012021,0.10873373300622867,0.0,0.0,0.08872025002384734,0.0,0.08204982949823934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06501065069160801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5506378028135742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519096210221745,0.12388905118599515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763995012078517,0.0,0.0,0.2844674071689398,0.0,0.1788098849919482,0.0,0.0,0.07800423072244629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549026469749445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997190706133376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949854330419094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956241340315075,0.0,0.19594272847167446,0.35172262691136125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533230507311018,0.0,0.07323112140151132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702504738010148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,br20e,2020/01/16,"Sadness Im just going to try and describe it best i can really , but its difficult ... i just feel this feeling that the closest thing to describe it would be sadness but even at random times i will just all of a sudden feel so down and sad and feel like i want to cry but i cant , because the sadness is on the inside not the outside if that makes sense , i just feel bad on the inside , i always think about bad things in my life that i regret and wish i could change and i somehow remind myself every single day that im the reason why im miserable , im the reason i didnt do well at school and im the reason why i fell out with all my friends from school, which i can never get back . I suppose i feel like i just dont really deserve to be happy even tho ive done nothing really that bad , i just cant stop being sad on the inside and i always have an incredibly strong feeling of misery in my chest , has anyone got any similar feelings or any advice on what to do ? 

Thanks x btw im a 17 year old guy",2.2629166666666656,3.1586763101851862,4.3157407407407415,88.16583333333334,75.25,6.696296296296296,22.75925925925927,6.9077264865688965,0.6063203703703701,777,20,172,7,16,268,116,216,0.221,0.628,0.151,-0.9713,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,14,19,0,1,12,0,19,2,1,4,3,45,35,14,0,6,12,0,8,2,1,2,1,0,0,1,13,9,0,1,12,0,0,2,6,11,1,0,3,8,23,8,20,26,4,21,0,7,0,0,2,11,0,4,10,117,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920127984373648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15191053964139986,0.0,0.0,0.12415195983699732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382761728702863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019145568850485,0.22865398539755846,0.05564563679369012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09579650902732513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656594762518884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288252874714603,0.0,0.10027075095066552,0.05887037188040072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341481830279304,0.10698370223417084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058391701266202,0.0,0.07691037209905571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3692458573388042,0.1304260476684377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052548481909204,0.0,0.04769191469174795,0.0,0.05187857490744845,0.0,0.0730078358002113,0.0,0.0,0.09038511801942613,0.0,0.0971730922265886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5916117299868036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447630799183926,0.08919311449472696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060932513468474614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704035416700071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758907848934279,0.0,0.09578678522331684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754358395515059,0.2815642397632732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18476775816976107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076317179062743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404167680313224,0.0,0.0,0.12128953865740125,0.05849084658377868,0.0,0.0,0.05322820267564525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06197557405489816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05384143380540545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207492132829614,0.0,0.16473850592170802,0.0,0.1049716378417734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484525213056418,0.0,0.0,0.058783647131490285
mentalhealth,Ideal_Imprisonment,2020/01/16,"What happened to me? TL;DR Had an episode lasting about 2.5 hours of which I flipped between varying emotions. Particularly anxiety, anger, fear and sadness 

I was in class doing math when all of a sudden I felt extremely anxious and I couldn’t stop moving. I was tapping, shaking my leg and doing a bunch of other weird and random movements because I couldn’t sit still.

Along with this, I couldn’t concentrate either. I have ADHD but this was like an extremely severe moment where I couldn’t focus on anything. Eventually I felt like I had to leave for a while and take a moment. I went to my car where I continued being restless.

When I was in my car I started feeling like something was wrong with me. I was talking to myself and was feeling like I was dissociating. Life felt like a movie and none of my actions felt like they were in my control. I didn’t want to go back to class and I was moving around, hitting myself. I took a moment to try and breathe but eventually I tried to put on my seatbelt.

As I put my seatbelt on, I grabbed it too forcibly which caused it to get locked. I screamed in anger and started slamming my fist on my arm rest, trying to force the seatbelt to come down but it wouldn’t. It just got more stuck.

Almost immediately after my struggle, I started feeling an intense fear. It was almost as I was being grabbed and I started wriggling around screaming, trying to get something off of me. 

Shortly after my intense fear, I went back to being restless with another moment of intense fear after about ten minutes. I was screaming and panicking. I felt like I had been captured or caught or something. I don’t know but I was begging for it (whatever it is) to be over. I was talking to myself more and more 

I began to go back to class, once again restless but on my walk I had begun to feel very sad. I felt like tears were about to form but they never did. For some reason I’m unable to cry and I haven’t done so in forever. 

I am now here trying to figure out what to do as I am now in a depressed state but at least calm. This all started happening about two and a half hours ago.",3.0945518430124617,5.008098109785205,4.156803898170248,85.99050152479448,75.06205250596659,6.087536462476798,28.106669318483164,6.816661863887847,1.3944351100503845,1664,69,321,15,36,540,184,419,0.19399999999999998,0.716,0.09,-0.9936,0,0,3,1,0,0,42.0,0,0,2,1,21,28,2,9,12,0,42,4,3,3,3,63,76,31,0,6,11,0,12,8,0,1,1,3,0,0,15,23,0,2,13,0,0,17,10,19,0,3,37,15,60,9,64,29,12,72,0,3,0,0,4,21,0,6,40,249,75,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245571780644728,0.0,0.06819439896568594,0.0,0.15406991072046775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066851726397832,0.058851753484584685,0.08690976187507445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330738810898982,0.13696921659660571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17746481428190602,0.0,0.046896223585077806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902899163677124,0.0,0.06626896199047311,0.0,0.0,0.08628429015636803,0.0,0.0,0.08450473076730569,0.0,0.0,0.06626027503568865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872678717882796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653665137506858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462735758414415,0.15559383701390098,0.10991857484629672,0.4431930565597701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038620181046369,0.0,0.08744294749128602,0.0,0.061528486120902726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605907830210362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152243076315985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04227908540098715,0.06270876545134392,0.0,0.08145847369862184,0.0,0.0,0.054338408719019314,0.3006755232294127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635302589018922,0.0,0.0,0.059333676844765364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192865489702046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546731474376537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909754356516592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690976187507445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776749693133,0.0,0.0,0.2722596278835049,0.0,0.06143693400651199,0.06431748649005756,0.0,0.0804246417773048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057842291177295,0.12366792008653532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547280719944297,0.26115438201092,0.0,0.0751500880457971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347586120272368,0.04537570352983678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263100729363426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411161301433136,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rinrinrinchanchan,2020/01/16,I never want to go back to school again So I was in a really bad mood and just lost it and started crying and the fucking principal saw me in the hallway took me into her office and told me I was a disturbance to the school and she would give me ISS (in school suspension) if I did that again so I told her I was just in a bad mood and she said I was disrespectful so now I don’t want to go back to school and don’t know what to do,0.898994845360825,2.0657098659793824,3.1284407216494863,94.22915592783508,79.20618556701032,6.911855670103092,19.341494845360824,7.645422480735847,0.22023814432989708,335,7,85,5,8,115,48,97,0.19,0.81,0.0,-0.9435,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,1,1,6,0,9,1,0,0,1,16,23,11,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,11,2,16,0,11,11,0,15,0,1,1,1,8,5,1,1,7,64,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25454144166083315,0.2763960110419406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18181031617767568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301583315780226,0.0,0.1587769482059656,0.1881318334079522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096264569640383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18067903606876906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765527384301692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603306599165868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15744254689203446,0.0,0.0,0.6700395521883068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171522791172951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163131085614155,0.1838931141537522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952499210549732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175770170334076,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EnergyVanquish,2020/01/16,"Sub Reddit’s for professional advise for Mental health issues such as PPMS and such? Looking for a sub reddit of people such as nurses, carers and the like. Want to know some ways I can help a relative through daily life",5.419285714285714,6.86519092857143,5.884285714285718,77.81071428571428,68.28571428571428,7.504761904761906,23.523809523809533,7.793537801064563,1.2867523809523809,177,4,30,2,3,57,33,42,0.0,0.843,0.157,0.6705,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,4,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,8,4,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,19,1,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40502684835094216,0.0,0.0,0.2554025418733607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3977059247103072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20940917770567236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691392535993432,0.18615650468347167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199769584134943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3839978893294272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641646019793344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22474679085129015,0.30245117876550626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blackriver_fbs,2020/01/16,"Need help with myself So I’ve been with this girl for like two weeks, I reaaally love her, but I warned her that I do not operate like everyone, I got OCD and anger issues. So I talked to her saying I was anxious about some dumb shit like I had thoughts and nightmares about her accidentally cheating. So just so you know, she is like exaaactly like me, 100%. 

So yea, I talked about it to her and she was like « don’t worry I won’t, I don’t know not now at least, I wanna je with you forever » it got on my nerves cuz she said « not now at least » like ffs can’t you just tell me you won’t never do that??.

I know she wouldn’t do that but just saying this made me mad so I left for a bit, when I came back she was mad because of my temper tantrum and the fact that I was angry and all... I mean I got BAD anger issues!! I do not control what I do or say sometimes. 

So she’s a bit sad, we’re cool now but it’s weird, I feel mad and I wanna punch shit or hurt someone. 

It’s super hard for me to be in a relationship even tho she’s really the girl of my dreams, I really really love her but I have these thoughts and It makes me sick. 

Can I get some advice for like... stop being anxious about her and things that might happen to her? Thanks",-0.8983757682177362,1.156702805970152,1.2654609306409128,100.02918788410886,91.8358208955224,4.496224758560142,14.59877085162423,6.068283710208149,-0.9034884986830553,944,18,235,9,34,313,127,268,0.302,0.5579999999999999,0.139,-0.996,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,4,0,2,21,28,11,0,5,2,23,5,2,4,3,47,43,24,0,4,13,0,2,8,0,4,1,4,0,2,15,12,0,2,7,1,0,1,11,15,0,1,14,7,52,13,23,23,7,14,0,2,0,2,32,5,3,5,16,161,67,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580711600329036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446445763210927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325839615175586,0.09040684468487446,0.06600470708067263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364210703850347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12384014187717968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144195975829095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151599460142584,0.0,0.0,0.1034633964857127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05474814841449355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056570308845889636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597972326807779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574907020716078,0.0,0.09699500192523568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257584885390002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591286078733458,0.0,0.0,0.2260262945573009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17851876553353407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764337154956407,0.0,0.0,0.4231897223255367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19544859639195392,0.1024543974969167,0.0722757961794384,0.0,0.0,0.11794548996759052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486487813726845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028608783831655,0.08350996435892499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080952230627017,0.0,0.0,0.11624906958241167,0.0,0.0,0.10299630468617264,0.25831885588165937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222897470951512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174282421619373,0.0,0.10708880741658412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052449283554234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17405804170519865,0.09463894631016788,0.09968699397808516,0.0,0.0,0.07193448518446538,0.0,0.0,0.17191982439562808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057709804618027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685334780378615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996063747192716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bpdsquared2,2020/01/16,"I'm Currently Manic, Also, Low Sex Drive... Hi everyone. I made a throwaway for this, but am active on Reddit. 

I am a 35F who has had a Borderline diagnosis for 15 years. Today, I was also diagnosed with Bipolar tendencies. The last time I was manic was about 8-10 years ago when I obsessively played WoW for about a year with little sleep and not much care for anything. If you want to laugh along with me (because it's sort of funny, and humor is the only thing getting me through this) , my current bout of mania is being hyperfocused on knitting. My kids are taking care of, but I am choosing to knit over cleaning the house, personal hygiene, sleep, and even work at times. I'm slightly sad about this revelation because I've been knitting since I was 7, but I recently decided to turn it into a business. I've made a little money, but more importantly, I have made friends, real ones, for the first time in my adult life. I have self-confidence I never had, and I was feeling really good about everything. Now that it seems it's just a bout of mania, it's a bit of a punch in the gut.

Anyhow, now that we're done laughing at the fact I have the strangest mania obsession ever, I have a real-life issue. I have a low sex drive. I have two young kids (3 and 4) but I don't think it's because of them. Me and my partner get time alone, and I just have zero interest most of the time. I can go months and not care. Once we start, I'm into it, but I want to want it (I hope that makes sense). I am on Cipralex, Topiramate, and Seroquel, and am about to add Lithium. Is there anything I can do to want to have sex, other than just donig it? My partner isn't pressuring me at all. But I want to do it for them, and also for me (please don't turn this into something it isn't - no one is forcing me, and I don't think there is an expectation. I just recognize that sex was a healthy part of our relationship, and I miss it and would like it back, but I also don't love doing it when I'm not particularly in the mood).",4.1997268673355626,4.397600161835747,5.669275362318842,82.7774247491639,70.32850241545894,8.688071348940914,28.483463396506878,8.617729084823388,1.900043775548124,1553,52,334,24,26,528,193,414,0.076,0.764,0.16,0.9878,2,1,1,0,0,0,67.0,2,1,2,2,22,22,0,3,22,0,43,11,3,4,4,65,73,29,0,9,16,0,1,1,3,1,3,0,1,6,25,23,0,0,6,1,1,3,11,7,0,5,13,1,44,14,47,58,6,45,0,4,0,5,16,17,0,6,26,236,69,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403993392459518,0.0,0.0,0.09819058196121498,0.0,0.30326578364032963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603477101676047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290007924598241,0.0,0.17337885183441934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035037639631828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899835729497244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622624914426796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701961001127826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06261856959502869,0.085757592700361,0.0,0.09059134155213833,0.08520565674038337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047936839315433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064206489363801,0.0,0.0,0.07324699825273925,0.0,0.09906460341412864,0.0,0.05388052128032717,0.0795189026783207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09416390116096823,0.0,0.10939357107935904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895299180919603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727966790462748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696438926915169,0.04631749727286558,0.19004134257078031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556625411999956,0.2691236214667497,0.06328384298256043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756733664303815,0.0,0.06969343063089495,0.0,0.07312034942996448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096545828552717,0.12848620508717742,0.07210435111304231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026658243766927,0.0,0.0,0.08278107552834611,0.0,0.10406868570319322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158203145302138,0.060735248948468615,0.0,0.09360963810460303,0.1017863275841017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630796057543819,0.09890349352196813,0.0,0.0,0.07842462905638672,0.0,0.18974924075992014,0.0,0.0,0.07298640801207924,0.0,0.0,0.06710428271148111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128242791659553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298499506173684,0.12149590884807285,0.0,0.0,0.2764111496986113,0.0,0.08986514718745503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20624373931868267,0.09261183512995234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27959562546685945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902000816342985,0.0,0.0,0.06734757062201814,0.0,0.0,0.1831561616247536
mentalhealth,Another_Attempt,2020/01/16,"Getting depressed after socialising? Got back from a social event, or rather a party and I just wanted to fucking die. I got dropped off by a friend, got inside and just felt like shit, real sad. I put my stuff away and changed and few minutes later was playing Minecraft with a friend (we agreed to meet up on PS4 after the party) and even then I wasn't distracted enough to be somewhat happy. Play for a few hours, get off and just listen to music as I cry and eventually have a breakdown. It's not like it's the first time either, went to a friend's house, slept the night came home, depressed. Small carnival, two friends, came home, depressed. When I worked it may of been happening too, I worked as checkout at a supermarket, so lot of socialising. Afterwards the same thing, but it may also of just been me being tired. It also seems the more I have fun the worse it hits, so I've started to hate big social interactions more and end up not going to too many. Sucks because I miss out on a lot.",3.857123519458544,5.316526624365487,4.506619289340102,86.14426057529612,72.09644670050761,7.080744500846024,25.82368866328257,7.554174236665415,1.2282029780033832,783,25,158,9,15,250,121,197,0.161,0.72,0.11900000000000001,-0.9177,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,0,3,14,20,4,1,15,0,10,4,2,0,0,33,31,18,1,2,10,0,1,2,4,2,1,1,2,0,8,13,0,0,2,2,0,5,3,10,0,2,12,2,12,10,27,14,10,31,0,5,0,1,10,11,3,7,16,111,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18620912445906784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093845698999333,0.08952318831649313,0.0,0.07097124247971003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663170287884095,0.0,0.0,0.1231615932368554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788675248207867,0.0,0.0,0.3008285328859493,0.0,0.12083016122836154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311747466866067,0.1202975424080166,0.0,0.07689722776637622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178569572652404,0.0,0.0,0.09903054751620012,0.0,0.0,0.35979685542299045,0.10763249518672653,0.12165390269353515,0.0,0.06616667777402142,0.0,0.2793457195955674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295372526346706,0.1239359541608924,0.0,0.11494500591859033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23356636086236354,0.0,0.11465459639088177,0.13433814291622806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375817622134946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19795974769873825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803608278995588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925642622191066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703869323275967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325164722730936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059884143847928,0.0,0.0,0.11950798844210725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373600578640185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240579983120103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327810032951734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773472077444416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788801236758844,0.13381273776874486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372973585802595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06867013613710657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079265986673478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951672075887758,0.0,0.11864642481298833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cmsgtcote,2020/01/16,"I had my first therapy appointment today! I’ve been having trouble getting over a really rough break up on top of my life just being pure shit for the last few years. So I decided to schedule an appointment. I haven’t seen a therapist in 7 years so I was a bit nervous. Even though it was just an intake appointment I not only learned a lot about myself but also the break up! I’m sooo happy to be be on the road to a healthy mentality. My ex and I haven’t talked or interacted since November and even then we never quiet went over why things went the way they were so that had been weighing on me but the therapist gave me some advice on what to do when I think about it to help get me though until I can see a regular therapist! 

I’m just kinda bummed I’ll be seeing a different therapist than this guy because he was really cool and had been through similar stuff a few years ago so he really understood where I was coming from. 

Anyways I just want you all to know that no matter how hopeless you feel or bleak life seems or how low your income is all you need to do is be strong enough to reach out and you will find the help you need. Just keep pushing guys!!

“You can’t have a rainbow without a little rain”",4.472454819277111,4.920082658634538,5.5492545180722885,82.9956890060241,69.80321285140562,9.277208835341368,27.610692771084338,9.354420925462401,2.1265680722891567,958,30,201,19,16,318,147,249,0.061,0.82,0.11900000000000001,0.9390000000000001,2,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,1,7,1,3,23,8,1,1,18,1,27,4,1,2,4,41,47,21,0,3,12,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,8,7,1,1,8,0,0,4,7,5,0,1,16,7,26,3,27,25,8,34,0,2,3,0,19,15,1,7,12,147,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110681842055398,0.10078863816196176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092625346913673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931077305127653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12413150424233373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979429180802284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879282871998488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748301662961695,0.0,0.15019622359045945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574903920881986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10392020251113508,0.09671359221308996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188076430084241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251627535680448,0.0,0.1210363027559345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15242210476802107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106223384410998,0.0,0.0,0.06248682450362164,0.09268108769224724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062005964547876,0.0,0.11395777708110605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966641041261031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458336727731246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16861496882442356,0.08769283954441659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864743582587303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21851836659354054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18120916465603146,0.10350867025597324,0.0,0.0,0.11671193536020667,0.0940542334081602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015987661883446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09138815972346943,0.0,0.0,0.13002643756506352,0.5280602031450081,0.0755375638753624,0.07285469313930146,0.22342033946578688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777478491801977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670635042434261,0.09025016924041793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21080301612494207,0.10259702156953864,0.0,0.0,0.10960323025119732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21965819389737226
mentalhealth,northeasternnova,2020/01/16,"What to do on a mental health day? I have worked 45+ hours a week solidly for over 15 months now. I have mdd and need a few days for myself and my mental health. My issue is that I have no idea what to *do* on a mental health day off. When depressed, I sleep. Therefore, I don't want to sleep the whole time. I don't have anyone to spend time with, so I'll be alone. I just don't have the ability to think of things I would enjoy doing.",-0.7285511363636346,1.2047199895833316,1.2115530303030295,101.9205681818182,88.6875,3.907575757575757,12.893939393939394,4.851557810540192,-1.5350708333333332,333,4,84,1,11,109,58,96,0.126,0.838,0.037000000000000005,-0.6954,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,6,0,14,5,2,1,0,10,17,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,11,1,13,15,2,14,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,10,57,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507057723143798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114428524016277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30836254476460273,0.0,0.13727456190241213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5082434284215097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569581117056796,0.0,0.0,0.1799216706287321,0.0,0.16635228298345073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4818554734680406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721633814782038,0.0,0.0,0.11817894046241545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189920670175805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588560821308653,0.10212486474889916,0.0,0.0,0.18587260457210802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09400700223047817,0.0,0.12784576874309342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779431170897695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603121562673087,0.0,0.0,0.11321964016979548,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fantastic-Mrs-Fox,2020/01/16,"Asking for Therapy Advice So I haven't been to therapy in quite a while. I'm about to start looking for a new therapist again because the last one incessantly compared me to her daughter and pressured me to get back into school, and just didn't empathize well with me.

I was just curious to see if anyone had any advice on looking for a new therapist. I need someone I can trust, and it's hard for me to find that. Does anyone have any tips or flags to look for? Please and thank you!",3.9774489795918377,5.065236540816329,4.9210204081632645,84.71683673469387,71.34693877551021,8.048979591836735,28.285714285714285,8.418075326091056,1.9006979591836741,383,14,78,6,7,125,66,98,0.053,0.835,0.11199999999999999,0.7634,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,7,4,0,1,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,12,17,8,0,2,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,4,5,10,3,17,13,0,10,0,0,4,0,4,3,0,2,7,54,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038044334500561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114202614921425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173860413474139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453231163042118,0.0,0.0,0.11953009791920766,0.0,0.09475980159527768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603379850907235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420768711439855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08121528720471761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13925108594050972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671105940276528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3916121017627676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152628970100777,0.0,0.3002657491777542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053357474654879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063548244512336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16533833304796086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732191339893312,0.12387211781167184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171078556399776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11002706123592557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14311585019909964,0.3555372096828534,0.3609747653756794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397666323750163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Radiant_Raspberry,2020/01/16,"I am extremely indecisive and always disapprove of my own decisions. Not sure if this belings here, cause everybody else seemed to be writing about more severe problems, but i want to get it out. 
I am super bad at decision-making. And i hate it. 
Whenever there is a decision, i go full on desperate, i cry for about a day or 2, until i have made a decision. I constantly go back and forth between prefering the one decision and then the other ine again, back and forth like 20 times. 

([Recent example] The example that made me write this: I applied for a job (im in my first semester in college) and got a reply that i didnt get it, and was kinda relieved cause i dint really have much time anyway. then i got the message that the previous person turned it down and i could have it. When off the phone, i started crying, i started thinking and thinking, i texted my mom, asked for opinions. The entire day, i thought of it, went back and forth between „No, i have too much stress, i should not put extra stress on, especially as i dont need the money“ and then „but it is good for character development, it is a very small job, i should say yes to some things“. 
Went back and forth, could not decide and was completely desperate. I decided not to take it, turned the job down and ever since i am thinking that i should have taken it, that it would have been fun. ) 

Soo, when i thought i could not have it, i felt fine and relieved, because i dont have so much time anyway. But now, a few days later i find the exact same outcome bad and feel like i absolutely should have done the job, just because this time i made the decision!! Why am i ok with an outcome, but not anymore if it was my responsibility??? 
I hate this about me, but i cant stop feeling that way. It feels awful. No matter the decision, i doubt it and think it is the wrong one. So i feel bad while having to decide and i feel bad after having decided...",4.486062992125987,5.098139517060371,5.6533375328084015,81.67506141732285,69.83989501312337,9.03563254593176,28.888293963254593,9.174902378510234,2.264807790026248,1480,52,303,28,25,494,178,381,0.182,0.722,0.096,-0.9899,4,0,0,0,0,0,61.0,0,0,0,2,20,22,2,4,22,3,37,0,0,5,3,88,72,35,0,14,14,1,6,2,0,5,0,1,0,1,28,20,0,1,25,0,1,5,11,12,0,3,17,7,43,10,29,46,10,46,0,0,0,0,8,11,0,9,31,225,71,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766798376435512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806514376353731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602685087653352,0.0,0.0,0.250132178854127,0.2716081751459177,0.09914856614955872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670840550906235,0.0,0.0,0.08526654204253778,0.08788222459061854,0.0,0.19479150493214228,0.0,0.17866092934397546,0.15734152658564518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322256537545576,0.19062196587338154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679356673752973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356210630116786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055989888723311,0.058097796880392426,0.07808367910766355,0.0,0.07432855398487763,0.0691740516875132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497674267158492,0.0,0.09243647143488624,0.06821061304989529,0.13008427352733948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058099202841147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784374679565002,0.0,0.3228056138956582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946148091855773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23085186777180794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524554661682637,0.0,0.0,0.1793472294800568,0.06030062735675346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021433297318774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100887613553042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778159711468575,0.0,0.08175296227456998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05209816062568106,0.0,0.08029752156319184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467201432254792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403420700801297,0.0,0.09187283767828916,0.0,0.06727195479277129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512292317563655,0.0,0.0,0.06799040601066601,0.18631246198496265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664679547288927,0.0,0.06114543767719197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054027972990087374,0.2084362370820447,0.0,0.12912415519605966,0.1896824361476898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17691405971155974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671007188024521,0.04796693207981817,0.06455111147240081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15077610498823735,0.07338215353845169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057770151810726526,0.08891489750521328,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ninja-boy98,2020/01/16,"Im lost and scared. I just want some silence. Where do I even start, I have no self respect, self love, self care. I hate myself, I'm a piece of shit. But I don't want to feel this way, I want to get better but i don't know how, my shitty brain doesn't know how to handle anything anymore. All I do is sit around and smoke pot and listen to music. I've stopped talking to all my friends. My fiancée is the only one left but she gone all day for school and work and that doesn't help at all. I need something to push me, I think i need some sort of realization or epiphany or good right punch in the face or a near death experience to get my head knocked straight. I'm a terrible human, I'm a terrible person, I'm a terrible fiancée. Idk what to do, I'm so lost... I just want to lay down and die, but I don't wanna die, I just wanna like not exist for a few minutes. Is that too much to ask, some peace and quiet from my own FUCKING BRAIN?

Yes this is a repost from r/vent. But its my own post so shush",1.506929895245772,2.4953693196347047,3.173843674456084,95.25256244963741,77.26484018264841,6.066183185603008,22.01477303250068,6.2272716619740125,0.06819881815739981,767,20,190,5,17,255,119,219,0.20600000000000002,0.642,0.152,-0.9526,0,0,2,0,0,1,30.0,0,0,0,4,12,16,3,1,9,1,13,7,5,2,4,43,40,19,3,8,12,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,6,8,0,1,4,0,0,2,7,9,0,1,3,3,23,7,23,37,12,17,0,2,0,2,12,9,2,7,4,114,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777351290254066,0.0,0.0,0.10602339056938297,0.11469388629810005,0.1204469268772428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139474872591835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28765351822601737,0.0,0.0,0.1313597877926466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309039560330947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674287574236556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509684114390996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602911135683798,0.0,0.0,0.0651447905397442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954057103017007,0.11910943490257304,0.1346259563933861,0.0,0.0,0.10806390936295536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720168454781505,0.13222582362507013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635796111380123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916806003317542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161291812159346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13998378063789993,0.0,0.0,0.06294415112167366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28128563483621905,0.0,0.11628208662733662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471137449364886,0.19106474015833688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730453485442928,0.09798774632083572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124971087572869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339199790153935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110027668540976,0.0,0.0,0.1289901586437222,0.13039178818380487,0.0,0.0,0.4032210380042677,0.0,0.13225122157567576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918643636282598,0.0,0.0,0.09119279668803357,0.0,0.0,0.10771504233971148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355578222296047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255472874695169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039699524120001,0.10226627716025574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379621266374387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway788t4322we,2020/01/16,"my mentalhealth is gets worse and I have no way of stopping it Hello I am 17 and latly evrey thing in my life is getting worse. I was always not realy well in the head with about 11 I had my first suicidle thoughts at the age from 15 to 16 i tried to kill myself atleast three times, but it sadly never worked out. Since I am 14 i had no friends and I also never got invided to any house partys or fun stuff like that. Latly i am having all sorts of crazy thoughts  i can not controll. I was never dignosed with any mentelilness, thought i my parents forced my to go to a psychatrist twice, because of my suicidel thoughts. I also tend to extrem overeactions my first suicide attemped at 15 was, because I did not understand my homwork. Somtimes i am dreaming I would kill my self with a shotgun, just to relise i am sadly still a live. the only way I think I would realy mange to end my live would be with a firamer, but they a hard to get in my country. (sorry fore my bad english i am not a native speaker)",2.0695173299101413,4.058533892682924,3.353504492939667,90.23685494223363,78.3658536585366,5.486521181001284,25.911424903722722,6.339386263674448,0.904463414634146,788,31,160,6,19,256,117,205,0.21600000000000005,0.73,0.054000000000000006,-0.9871,1,0,0,1,0,3,16.0,0,0,1,4,6,9,2,0,9,0,21,2,1,1,4,32,33,8,3,3,8,1,1,1,1,3,1,1,0,1,5,8,0,2,6,1,0,1,9,5,1,4,11,2,34,4,24,18,1,19,0,2,0,0,5,6,0,2,11,118,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945492038763484,0.1012133273550319,0.0,0.0,0.16543727620761134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156341896885164,0.1482999156207083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642839413676916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077359805047433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20693200974639364,0.0,0.0,0.09397792936181182,0.0,0.19065394877586087,0.0,0.06913020251544329,0.0,0.09728575781209843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896458174991958,0.0,0.12483662675270266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14035498437846053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691508896687496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591716786507163,0.05942663304652882,0.0,0.2148187932241503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28144630623343864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251188140433254,0.0,0.0,0.13506562783193055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268959240591997,0.0,0.0,0.10062097322072554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616481440017372,0.0,0.0,0.09714100019835996,0.10169558538234436,0.0,0.0,0.13924746377806738,0.13305323781968909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08081149477746151,0.07794130962251627,0.0,0.3862708673221919,0.0709286335845765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258484341694652,0.0,0.0,0.12663040757913727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19310262883963208,0.0,0.0,0.10936799908221004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855458389370804,0.0,0.2479209067460695,0.2592264004908471,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Quiet_Solution,2020/01/16,"Tips to help calm down someone who is having a breakdown? A little background, I am homeschooled but we go to this place once a week where all the other homeschoolers from my school do our projects, meetings, etc. I am in 4th year highschool and the age of my classmates range from 15-17 years old. Also Im sorry for my bad English.

Last wednesday before dismissal, one of my classmates had a breakdown because her opinions were opposed by another classmate in our project. (Our project was to organize JS Prom)

She didnt try to talk back anymore. She just cried for about 10 minutes. Our teacher called her mom, but during the time that we were waiting for her mom to arrive, she just continued crying loudly.

No one tried to comfort her. The teacher left to talk to her mother on the telephone on the floor below us. My other classmates CONTINUED doing the meeting and kept talking about how they will push with THEIR ideas for the project, which only made it worse.

After that, she started screaming while she was crying(Every classroom has soundproof walls and even the other classrooms heard her). And even while she is screaming, my classmates still continued their discussion.

I wanted to calm her down but I didnt know what to say. Isnt there anything I can say or do that might help her calm down? This isnt the first time she has done this.",5.054840637450199,7.071123996015937,4.301312749003984,86.57722808764944,69.99601593625498,6.294900398406376,30.876693227091646,6.742157984588678,1.7287384860557773,1077,46,191,8,20,319,148,251,0.105,0.8340000000000001,0.061,-0.9282,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,7,0,3,1,13,7,0,0,14,0,23,0,0,2,1,24,31,12,0,1,6,3,0,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,13,7,0,3,2,0,0,2,5,3,0,3,11,7,36,4,31,18,2,35,0,0,0,0,42,14,0,3,19,143,49,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419871150248447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662809006595714,0.0,0.0,0.1292199193038932,0.0,0.0,0.10722358384363087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019058839647103,0.1087928110882174,0.07942803062523134,0.0,0.11087341371556617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13304812132969382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28625095285916496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13333938609623425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14531594286849348,0.17212028840468102,0.0,0.1097811031102162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083082507959367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405096381266367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17467108030262585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708980282309853,0.1407434536208068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160799384931554,0.10620969796648352,0.0,0.0,0.1415684082481201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13059213466404518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232904649077309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13822485489253766,0.0,0.30520526871509784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13672510817726474,0.13876238240034294,0.17658565836502033,0.09909697545849487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13613295628153496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20723530086993988,0.0,0.13186783367107824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040048768920002,0.0,0.0,0.1458571706260056,0.09222510645154004,0.0,0.10405559984881786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31418412591917744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195481823389176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769266407103795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673162050031947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685272915570338,0.0,0.10451664243932428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13278409020829005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678143909803274
mentalhealth,hownoname,2020/01/16,"What happens at the first psychiatric appointment? I have never been to a psychiatrist. My mom is a nurse practitioner and found one that’s near our house under our health insurance. I called and made an appointment for next Tuesday. The lady said I will have to fill out paperwork, and it’s an initial intake mental evaluation appointment. What does that mean? How long will it take and what should I bring? She said after that’s been assessed then she may refer me to therapy or the psychiatrist depending. Psychiatrist has a 3-4 month waiting list right now. Will they give me medication if they find something is wrong with me that requires it or will I have to wait 3-4 months? I don’t have a pcp either.",4.625685210312078,6.6939369552238785,5.27583446404342,78.93463364993218,71.23880597014927,9.051831750339213,27.853459972862957,9.573946990214177,2.653740298507463,568,21,105,14,11,183,87,134,0.034,0.966,0.0,-0.6199,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,2,0,2,2,2,1,0,0,9,0,16,2,0,3,1,23,27,9,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,6,2,2,0,0,10,6,0,3,4,0,0,2,2,1,0,2,6,2,16,0,11,15,1,17,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,5,10,76,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938617126251692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16614213058326674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17352271521618756,0.16148934195281528,0.0,0.20816463022862933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18212483530206533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16788687694237414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018054573314507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190655191031437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16801442709289846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17964402983292418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20680618534733305,0.0,0.19125748904414694,0.19132773539815284,0.0,0.0,0.22235419600069445,0.30307860207484993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642677030131998,0.0,0.2019114159063652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864968634489718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16213390370453062,0.36118842497278986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14615854662099828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274625026321905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171140928421529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075750651817155,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Death_Eludes_Me,2020/01/16,"Need help with SO, cleaning. Haven't been able to find anything on Google. 
My S.O suffers from severe depression, anxiety etc. Can't/won't help me at home. My apartment is filthy and I just can't keep up anymore. It's overwhelming me now.
Does anyone here know of a maid/organization service that I could pay to help me do chores at home, help me organize? Does anything like that exist? 
Thanks",2.1920270270270272,5.071095500000002,2.6041081081081106,89.57264864864867,87.24324324324324,5.662702702702703,23.616216216216216,7.1686216300943375,1.165793513513515,313,12,59,5,10,96,59,74,0.149,0.654,0.19699999999999998,0.6199,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,8,10,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,8,2,9,8,1,6,0,3,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,33,11,2,0.19067286821432064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458642222893647,0.0,0.1890962499405297,0.13332290282046025,0.0,0.3138150483182308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15223677007664002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16422626199730364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33371822379227256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21265065015542448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17427154721762889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5112160174099805,0.0,0.3825208666687366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694788061579817,0.0,0.0,0.10478882184429687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315313215092644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14138151577377828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21540606820801292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554595934399075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nekololita243,2020/01/16,"How can regression be clinical The BDSM community has it plastered on the internet you can't be in their community until your 18 and I saw one person saying you cant regress (age or animal) unless your 18+ or its clinical 


If I did not have the ability to regress (mainly animal) I would end up killing myself from stress (I'm not far off now)

Is there anything inherently bad with regression that it needs to be gatekept like it is?",3.7584873949579816,5.627874058823533,5.5268907563025245,77.06529411764707,73.11764705882355,10.033613445378153,29.789915966386555,10.290406445055957,3.409168067226891,345,15,66,11,7,118,63,85,0.14400000000000002,0.828,0.027999999999999997,-0.8796,1,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,4,1,0,3,4,1,1,3,0,12,2,0,1,0,11,15,7,1,3,6,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,2,9,1,10,9,1,9,0,0,1,0,7,5,0,3,5,50,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938588421423016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29815949396368496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31628026857610314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3950728218795081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17445862907148418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647814931008358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24197688253806335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118016689170036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28397635754025125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4090512323844513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536701146176877,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kai-iLL,2020/01/16,"perplexed been wanting to die more than usual lately, just not to sure to go about it?",5.91,5.978171764705883,5.616470588235295,85.07411764705884,66.64705882352942,6.8000000000000025,28.764705882352942,3.1291,0.9926941176470592,68,2,13,0,1,21,15,17,0.368,0.632,0.0,-0.7999,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,10,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4585869739085677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511225361739362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4984439068935769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4164533191277287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4866527896409883,0.0,0.2606239171483733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Erindeed,2020/01/16,"[Academic] Women’s Sexual Experiences in Romantic Relationships (Women, in a romantic relationship, had sex in past 4 weeks) Women, if you are in a sexually-active romantic relationship, please participate in a brief survey! 

Researchers at Western Carolina University are inviting women, whether or not you have had past unwanted sexual experiences, to participate. This study investigates how past unwanted sexual experiences and discussions of those experiences with one’s romantic partner may be associated with women’s sex lives.

To participate, you must be:

·  A woman

·  18 years or older

·  In a romantic relationship

·  Have had sex with your partner in the past four weeks

The goal of this study is to better understand women’s sexual experiences in romantic relationships. You will be asked very personal questions about your sex life, personality, and romantic relationship. If you have had unwanted sexual experiences in your past, you will also be asked a few very brief questions about those experiences. 

This study will take approximately 15 minutes to complete

**Your responses are** ***completely anonymous*****. This study does not collect any identifying information.** 

If you are interested in participating, please follow this link:

[https://wcu.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_1zTrzAbmveraWr3](https://wcu.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_1zTrzAbmveraWr3)",8.909903846153846,13.427011475,8.767999999999999,45.90130769230774,71.75,13.276923076923078,36.692307692307686,11.130083040563493,7.062953846153849,1125,58,125,51,26,362,95,200,0.027999999999999997,0.8170000000000001,0.155,0.975,0,0,0,0,0,0,63.0,0,11,0,2,4,2,0,0,8,0,21,5,0,1,1,24,26,10,0,7,8,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,11,7,5,0,0,5,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,4,0,11,2,22,13,1,23,0,0,0,4,34,11,0,8,9,84,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06671229571578235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05672961015965114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559760389461059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377970601384994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17493211055163785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300288348421154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5712169444123839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058923207039388824,0.0,0.0,0.07366288102615702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05652869642122429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3981772144917584,0.0,0.14568120475779597,0.0,0.18314393010767527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869027705160619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5373820551019316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627227292631303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684492178542874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376632624997156,0.0,0.0,0.1338316963250863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05372083356412995
mentalhealth,Miaxd,2020/01/16,"Feeling safe again I hope this post is not inappropriate, but it said venting was okay so I'll give it a shot.

Some time ago something happened to me - I naively trusted an untrustworthy person. I realized later than I would've liked that they were not who they said they were. 

I've been unable to speak to anyone about it. It's left me with paranoia feelings. For example I'll think they know where I live, that they can see me through my phone camera etc.

It's been a while but every time I'm reminded of it I feel unsafe all over again. Im sick of being alone with it and I want to feel safe again. 

What brings you the feeling of safety? 
Any advise will be greatly appreciated",1.6328710462287113,4.0499305839416095,2.9588613138686166,90.11649148418492,82.57664233576642,5.405158150851581,21.542092457420924,6.742157984588678,0.4595385888077863,538,17,111,6,15,174,92,137,0.065,0.7240000000000001,0.212,0.9614,0,1,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,5,0,6,7,0,0,4,1,10,1,0,0,1,21,26,5,0,2,4,0,5,1,0,1,1,3,0,1,12,3,0,2,8,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,9,17,7,14,16,3,13,0,0,1,0,14,3,0,2,9,71,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678911665175623,0.0,0.0,0.19616068905168527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879810682282378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13243248484155146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21123042933725025,0.0,0.0,0.15957718805894094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4788302117808785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816891910106988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20881353962947055,0.0,0.0,0.16748528997915746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18811636886749916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20458388493294571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040889732137545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057830342944775,0.0,0.0,0.0925309943043589,0.0,0.16724316618047205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16537627633670715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18139229859435446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3603244589179347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15092682366084456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458089340249772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135950679064407,0.0,0.0,0.22088066086772068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117126906714536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345439205604302,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,concertatorius,2020/01/16,"How to get someone with social anxiety to go see someone To say I'm concerned is an understatement. My sister is at university and she won't go to the cafeteria to eat, go to class, or really do much outside of her room because she has several social anxiety. I've told her to go to see the school's mental health office, but she does not listen. 

She's been on probation before so I'm afraid that she will be expelled soon or just drop out. I know that she wants to graduate...she's just not going to class which means that she's failing her classes. 

She also has a history of depression & suicidal tendencies. She used to go to a therapist when she was younger but was pulled out because our parents did not want to medicate her and she seemed to do a bit better but for the last few years she's been spiraling back down.

At this point, it's also impacting me because instead of focusing on my classes I'm just worrying about her and stressing out because she's missing lecture. It got to a point earlier this week where I was on the brink of an anxiety attack myself in the middle of the library because I was just so worried about her. I had to go to the restroom for a few minutes to calm myself down.

I need some suggestions on how to convince her to go see someone and get medical help.",5.89551282051282,5.785493423076925,6.918461538461537,76.33320512820515,66.69230769230771,10.471794871794874,35.4102564102564,10.203070172399654,3.5892102564102566,1030,47,198,23,15,347,133,260,0.16,0.794,0.047,-0.9838,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,2,17,9,1,2,14,0,17,5,0,3,0,30,44,16,1,3,12,2,0,0,0,2,3,2,1,0,8,8,2,0,3,0,0,9,4,6,0,0,10,5,31,3,42,31,5,34,0,3,3,0,30,18,0,4,6,143,39,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639820536640986,0.0,0.11108826241355507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352992601386852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663957955623945,0.0,0.07883714782152555,0.0,0.3124983839197905,0.0,0.08724316172275448,0.0,0.0,0.0906770452213831,0.111933232776279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830659393786318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972231152217608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491100091881377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713254174783192,0.0,0.4661489166885487,0.0,0.08200042991918645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089817016671342,0.0,0.0,0.0687218729740922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634631043348805,0.08357341535443234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168226217700322,0.0,0.2065708914737661,0.10332338111928896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536934595499642,0.07602267720104121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384440845817005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938428341001871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06568159937345276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153380626865964,0.0,0.10376307857273064,0.2451028979199452,0.0933369828460812,0.0,0.11582664042678492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20902729583977486,0.2606130887188763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744465005493647,0.0,0.0,0.11214820081298116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904207155003885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796920742976888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855064908347407,0.0,0.0,0.12094648940397405,0.0,0.08224119771801605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20824285433321266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602420526737494
mentalhealth,RandomlyRachelanne,2020/01/16,How do you maintain a job with Borderline Personality disorder? I am feeling so lost and want to bury my head. I don't want to leave the house or eat. I like working at first then I just don't want to go and feel like everyone hates me and makes fun of me behind my back. I'm losing my mind.,0.7909523809523833,2.567489603174604,3.1145238095238104,91.43464285714286,81.53968253968254,6.73968253968254,21.61111111111111,7.793537801064563,0.7474253968253972,227,7,54,4,6,78,46,63,0.16,0.616,0.22399999999999998,0.1149,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,4,4,6,1,0,2,0,4,2,1,2,0,14,14,7,0,3,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,2,10,3,7,13,0,5,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,5,33,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670174922307014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489361270785707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22225527895225192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075490018714476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21965108325642724,0.15517153184437968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18475474356337104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234427950888562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144452961739435,0.22291533331434046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506257893929853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21554277565497387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299890835228768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21223110649341825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24299720638306635,0.23710527689298924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498624504926325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193154659996514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896553170025067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38433999540588576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812806784889588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mark906,2020/01/16,"I rarely feel genuinely excited Lately I find that I have trouble feeling and acting excited when the situation warrants it. Some really amazing stuff is going on in my life right now and I am happy about it. It is a rare opportunity, will be very good for me and is something I REALLY want. I am very fortunate to have it and I should feel excited but I don't.

This happens with less important stuff too. I just always feel like 'Huh. Well that happened.' and go on about my day unfazed. I can act happy and excited when I think the people around me expect it but I rarely actually 'feel' it. The last time I truly felt excited about something was 6 months ago and it was a one off.

I was depressed for a long time up until a year ago. So even though I do feel fine, I worry that maybe I lost the ability to feel that level of happiness? I'm still moving forward and working on myself so maybe it will return eventually.",2.235956284153005,4.487072404371587,4.301775956284157,82.32894808743174,79.05464480874315,7.563934426229508,24.374316939890708,8.515128840125781,1.8577628415300549,722,26,140,16,18,247,106,183,0.115,0.6809999999999999,0.204,0.9497,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,15,17,0,0,8,1,17,1,0,0,0,27,33,16,0,3,3,0,8,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,15,10,0,0,10,0,0,6,1,3,1,1,5,8,22,14,17,24,2,31,0,2,0,0,0,10,0,1,18,103,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.1173426759077326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21318151238055771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000542412692932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704436576359116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754867312879157,0.0,0.10356763793729946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942129857784587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255996642753137,0.08590371196115347,0.1154549438895446,0.0,0.10990259587899964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366770590835909,0.10085657582154298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21266614652723945,0.3840120654224587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801647687489597,0.13564263954622327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493325204685967,0.05874608449342261,0.0,0.0,0.1064138586099642,0.0,0.0,0.13126263025560655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24160638513722896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597914913302667,0.1278023871514405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148174992944268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336338316212052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540652356683369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268936187935687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516145641410965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18514237359110894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602855004355272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27530562824235144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704873262847263,0.1181410095733131,0.0,0.1402327302743237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843096054947226,0.07092416129871465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811552641606988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754046462007195,0.122115572455369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743443248463369
mentalhealth,Renatinhoh,2020/01/16,"Never ever felt hunger before, yet I am healthy and have a normal weight, by forever forcing myself to eat (have no pleasure in eating anything as well) I’m not sure if many others have this condition and that’s why I wanted to talk about it. Since I have memories, from childhood to nowadays, I have no record of “asking” for my family for food, instead I always used to HATE meal time, as it was boring and I never had any pleasure in eating, even good food (I can feel taste normally). But as my family wanted me to be healthy, they forced me to eat anyways, and did their job well, as while I was getting older they taught me to force myself to eat, else I could have health troubles. I always took it very serious and so dictated myself to eat regularly and go fot healthy stuff, even tho It was more of a “task” than anything. Now that I’m 19, and realized how weird it is, compared to other people, this started to annoy me. This condition doesn’t bring any phisical illness at all, I don’t feel constantly tired or anything, never lose weight, and my depression symptoms are smaller nowadays, in other words, I feel completly fine. Even so, I decided to seek doctors about it (explained that it didn’t “start”, I have ALWAYS been like this), and not for my surprise, they recommended all sorts of medicines, and none of them worked at all. I keep having breakfast, lunch and dinner by forcing myself (I’m used to it) but never feeling that “need” for it, wich people call hunger, so IF I wanted, I could stay days without eating and feeling no difference (I actually did it years ago, for 3 days, and felt nothing).
I also searched the entire internet (overstatement) about it and found no case like mine, and no explanations to the cause or if there’s anything that could be done about it, and thus the reason I’m posting this here, maybe someone can relate.
Anyways, all I can think is this is some sort of brain issue, on whatever part should control hunger, but maybe I’m just wrong, not sure if I’ll ever know.",8.019371420779926,6.8258439559585495,7.740411780747205,75.75229751840745,62.808290155440424,10.406108535587672,35.341696209435504,9.276330184999452,3.0828880829015537,1581,58,294,22,19,504,197,386,0.111,0.815,0.07400000000000001,-0.9106,1,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,0,0,5,3,25,20,2,0,5,0,33,25,1,7,12,77,65,36,0,14,14,0,9,2,0,1,5,0,0,0,27,16,19,2,14,0,0,3,17,9,2,0,14,10,38,11,43,45,8,30,0,2,0,0,9,6,0,9,21,213,65,4,0.0,0.0,0.07098334147954119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447925263922237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05816981929603166,0.18157548358823367,0.0,0.0,0.09893082336066417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23943392030555735,0.0,0.06800169221173513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06189602872790673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120143251958806,0.07427524835794395,0.0,0.0,0.07472359013141879,0.0,0.0,0.0762660702250042,0.07860564943297448,0.08158362898084766,0.1742299176032923,0.0,0.0,0.09382202857406607,0.0,0.0626504973835215,0.0,0.0,0.07599738377707918,0.0,0.0744520467857513,0.0,0.07443784939775196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.521015279474391,0.060764588954975565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14413142824864614,0.1315942368640968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714481286853938,0.0,0.18389659704628936,0.0,0.13968281606355898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591398816901738,0.07975519972561948,0.0,0.0,0.038003430588577435,0.0,0.041339582050176495,0.06101051221660485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181528018768454,0.0,0.07731877666975646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592122768679092,0.07218281352992442,0.06465428472053583,0.0,0.0,0.039975773234649965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107377335525386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813769887825822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737465215654614,0.1461533786166481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053935480089103115,0.22440500670517924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425386971037804,0.06979559294697715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876988139160644,0.0,0.10085693799141822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06966441469480872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747884074357269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06017093581488581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163201374060572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297090433244856,0.07753071856935424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326942124676175,0.0,0.0,0.1371123947571529,0.07560427959192306,0.0,0.05846532254532547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04660858853289823,0.0,0.0,0.042415036569891096,0.08360345174412971,0.0,0.0,0.08081635460955623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564729226487853,0.0,0.060017774964804475,0.12871107433859785,0.0,0.0,0.1771544350733405,0.13080324394283768,0.0,0.06563616092503881,0.0,0.0,0.07011836356083431,0.0,0.05295528370505465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795293165964048,0.0,0.046841907437437436
mentalhealth,vitalogy95,2020/01/16,"Is there anywhere I can go to get immediate help without being placed on a hold? I’m not going to harm myself but I am in the middle of a mental health crisis. I missed three days of work and now that I’m back I cannot focus. I feel like I’m going to go insane and need help quickly. 

Is there anything I can do? I’ve never gotten help before and now I need it",0.054999999999999716,1.8199465000000004,2.9125000000000014,91.9925,84.0,4.5,16.25,5.148860815047168,-0.725625,280,5,63,1,8,99,51,80,0.179,0.691,0.13,-0.7311,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,3,0,8,1,0,0,1,11,21,4,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,4,4,2,0,1,1,1,8,1,8,19,0,14,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,7,42,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822510354170436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17029684906754142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18845475711157614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282990338820525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198194534370384,0.15821829549194966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570899503844817,0.0,0.5034662839910156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23541237744859664,0.0,0.0,0.4453402521360241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819911204277807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22318978712235107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32843457032019285,0.1708114070579258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313891342493737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21348928914336693,0.0,0.1612328825211237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WorryTooMuch1994,2020/01/16,"I keep having crying fits... I'm so emotionally unstable what's wrong? I am in therapy right now. But no therapist I've seen really gives me tools to manage this issue and I'm not really sure what's causing it. 

I am worried it's ruining my relationship with my boyfriend. Whenever he tells me the TINIEST thing I should work on, I'll start crying. Which makes him scared to tell me things. I will also look too much into every single tiny thing he says, create a story in my head, have an anxiety attack and spend an hour crying. 

I am just so emotional and sensitive to the extreme. What could be causing this and what are some ways to manage it? I need help. 

I am on birth control and have been for a year. That could be causing some issues. BUT, I have been extremely sensitive for as long as I can remember. Even before birth control I would cry a couple times a month.",2.3348826929615782,4.607253953757232,4.0666848010880665,84.03189391363482,78.82658959537572,7.538796327779667,22.89323359401564,8.4952907291091,1.6396850731043866,686,22,133,15,17,230,108,173,0.158,0.812,0.03,-0.9458,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,7,5,1,1,8,0,19,1,1,6,1,27,28,12,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,14,7,0,3,1,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,3,3,18,1,14,18,4,18,0,1,2,0,9,8,0,2,9,93,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862486851953759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477905773458012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607681354595734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430195029446267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415363034051879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24859414999996785,0.17696580720184607,0.12262320326056232,0.4869341030216284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24932122931582165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319734433110542,0.0,0.09337289961441343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631122655827148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373605660614973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428211588593735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913803026377662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313402002279468,0.0,0.09850430260788404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807459698786483,0.09306315172652584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397500893661164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845761720718545,0.0,0.08146743166599943,0.08217362352647008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199171137468486,0.0,0.0,0.11898209934459575,0.12554050894531066,0.09464197532929143,0.0,0.0881306545319772,0.11095285007819773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844087336217406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104449077758959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19372783889270687,0.0,0.1267354091211851,0.12867368963467693,0.2208770210359265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462160420557499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796589629103076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068024127583022,0.11254582543049796,0.0,0.07872526230740777,0.12116721887918752,0.0,0.07136618160562944
mentalhealth,Its_Haleeyy,2020/01/16,Less appetite on abilify? I just started abilify about a week ago and a half ago and noticed I'm starting to have less of an appetite.  Has anyone experienced this?,3.640215053763441,6.183023129032258,5.188387096774196,76.26924731182797,75.7741935483871,8.004301075268819,36.13978494623656,8.841846274778883,3.7517655913978505,131,8,22,3,3,44,24,31,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,4,5,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,17,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6441260781628279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540431961124753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4136445149413604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5143223754751923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29143500010124906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Confusedgirl007,2020/01/16,"Drastic Mood Change Hi! At 14yrs old I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. My doctor put me on Cipralex, that's the only medication I took for my anxiety. Last year, around this time (I was 21, need this later into the story) I saw a psychiatrist (still do) he diagnosed me with Generalized anxiety disorder (which I knew already) and major depressive disorder. He gave me an anti depressant, I forget what it was called but I took that for only two months or so cause it made you gain weight (which I didn't want since I'm categorized as ""morbidly obese""). So after that he gave me two other ones which I still take (auro-lamotrigine and Act-Bupropion XL) . About 4 months ago, I told him I wanted to get off the Cipralex (cause of weight gain side effect), so I took cipralex for 7yrs (14 to 21).

Well... I don't know what happen but I feel more emotional lately (probably a month and a half after stopping Cipralex). I get more annoyed lately, just by the smallest things. My mom and sister said I'm more of a bitch lately (which I do agree with). I just get angry so fast. I hate it... before I used to get annoyed and angry, everyone does. But it wasn't as much as I do now, I was ""nice"". I am seeing my psychiatrist in 3 weeks, so I will tell him about this, but I just wanted to know if anyone else experienced this also.

I just want to know if this has happened to anyone else? Or why this is happening? Is it cause of the Cipralex?",2.808063380281688,4.762123003521129,4.421385915492959,83.59685352112676,76.00704225352112,7.924281690140845,24.036056338028175,8.726425361277474,1.7130187605633798,1119,36,225,24,25,375,147,284,0.172,0.777,0.052000000000000005,-0.981,0,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,0,1,0,3,17,9,4,0,10,0,15,7,0,6,0,43,47,22,0,7,12,2,3,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,22,10,3,1,7,0,0,4,3,6,1,4,16,7,36,2,29,30,5,31,0,2,2,0,15,7,1,4,20,147,58,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631896478484006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950091460295473,0.06885099018182246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975897567764829,0.0,0.0,0.12040073765207855,0.1764311810585975,0.0,0.07664374916848668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732614080258907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791370606499538,0.0,0.0,0.2653331177275885,0.09107821833502426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830882517571795,0.1747713825288805,0.0,0.0,0.29602064037084785,0.0881229683072447,0.07534324460111606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438444254485388,0.09684648224871133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226847741137568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0435327561643926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17992655696685092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284033915487915,0.0,0.0,0.08500203732701668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14194843324934028,0.07017978213416129,0.2913603261910741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08146617617888785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673272533739712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008346679951155,0.2061631673675214,0.0,0.0632905123750618,0.06383913952299408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903433348165444,0.0,0.058340920223618975,0.1309598705388684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282611732204858,0.0,0.0,0.08655032283805635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189707136378079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860741502355848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121955270203831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13751285366678995,0.07198016348753307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473352431268896,0.0,0.0752517535786638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05719839837574187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0502033064873976,0.0,0.0,0.08226847741137568,0.2869676804101487,0.0,0.0,0.16820668589016372,0.0,0.0,0.07435935499538243,0.0,0.0,0.20312675365162952,0.0,0.06906106820961394,0.2096836197449382,0.07741070002836703,0.0,0.07768830514023377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05544304156524788
mentalhealth,enoughisenough88,2020/01/16,"Just want to tell people who will listen. I’m a mum. I’ve always had mental health issues since was younger but no one ever believed me. Thought I was attention seeking. 

Over the last year I’m getting worse. I can’t sleep. I hear things. Don’t want to leave the house and when I have to it’s a mission to get ready. I have no urge to do anything but drink. All I want is to drink. But an incident happened Tuesday where now I am going to stay sober. 

I could have a conversation with someone and not remember anything that was said. I used to be a clean freak never stop cleaning and now be lucky if I did. once a week. My kids are happy and healthy I don’t show them the way I am. 

But I’ve reached out to family who just tells me to go out a walk and I’ll be ok. I’ve been to the doctors before but that wasn’t much good. When I do drink I have all the pills gathered in front of me but I don’t take them. I don’t want my kids to find me in that way. 

I’m alone and I’m scared to talk to anyone now. I’m going to make another doctor appointment for next week but they will prob brush me off yet again. I don’t drive so it’s hard for me to get to any kind of support groups as I’m in a tiny village. Everything like that is half hour at least away. 

Just wanted to get out there and hoping maybe some advice on what to do. Thanks.",-0.5218412570507667,1.4946720616438398,1.4587268331990335,99.90081788879937,88.65753424657534,4.531184528605963,17.14987912973409,5.900188976854957,-0.6429169218372279,1030,25,254,8,34,339,157,292,0.079,0.7559999999999999,0.166,0.9745,0,1,3,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,3,0,14,11,0,1,13,1,31,8,1,2,4,43,60,19,0,8,12,1,1,1,0,2,4,3,2,2,10,11,3,1,4,4,0,6,11,2,0,2,9,5,28,9,36,45,5,38,0,0,0,0,17,12,0,4,18,158,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570747381370947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203679884372927,0.0,0.0,0.09001036430923652,0.0,0.0,0.07356279005402426,0.11343104369593805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563855804288454,0.0,0.17803781079469874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163408472567156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204905835847453,0.12187631493637045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636902982235453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22144363508735468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31791130025856884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785058781388983,0.0,0.0,0.09722082132419677,0.0,0.10197787437052902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887009853959622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260681385843416,0.0,0.1844352381982133,0.09073215705314946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09565890002422643,0.11515442513755104,0.09690365840567572,0.0,0.0,0.11498509245507404,0.12192122046297235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744230090090877,0.10653070149143276,0.1248195628645574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290671892230132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264773946847052,0.0,0.08817715950762879,0.0,0.11454183122365115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05284889875644863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722077315836243,0.0,0.1086764462443328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901507637547893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952115887659378,0.0,0.08343132016168324,0.0,0.11504546573087175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520297073469528,0.07330225988085244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749950066412207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254132176668295,0.0,0.10289930953400016,0.0,0.10830216490747173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948357586326465,0.0,0.10825324126384517,0.0,0.09165642685249514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153002831496248,0.0,0.09043924281628513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275584252588008,0.0,0.0,0.08133422654261076,0.08694706263917858,0.18909964313795355,0.09959311531729262,0.0,0.0,0.07186674201291979,0.0,0.0,0.08587896080067642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342857026511897,0.0,0.0,0.319022438021505,0.17172874783532588,0.17354311005539966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11023968739715848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06966122964504386
mentalhealth,pokichu-false,2020/01/16,"I despite my self So this is not that easy.. Buy here we go
I don't think I have depression because I never had any bad thoughts about hurting my self or any suicidal thoughts 
I just feel empty most of the time
Yeah I laugh at jokes
I become sad when I see something horrible 
But then 
That empty feeling rushes me again
It's not like am sad at that time
It just feel a like nothingness 

I have no idea if this is normal or no but whenever I start thinking about it
It hurts 
It really hurts
Not physically but it's just pain that I can't explain 


Maybe am just sad and am confused about who I am and my emotions are out of control because of some loses i had that I was not ready for.. And I lost someone that I loved the most. 
But recently I started talking to a girl online 
I like her
When I talk to her I feel happy 
When I think of her I always hope she is fine I always hope she is smiling 
I don't know what I should talk about really
This is my first time speaking about these stuff. 
So that's about it I guess",-0.1938293650793632,2.0593691805555565,1.7315343915343924,96.38833333333334,90.99074074074072,4.752380952380952,19.28835978835979,6.367922702773337,-0.002764021164020747,797,25,180,9,28,262,109,216,0.217,0.636,0.14800000000000002,-0.9055,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,4,17,22,0,1,4,1,19,2,0,1,1,43,39,16,1,5,15,0,4,3,0,1,1,1,0,3,21,5,0,1,12,1,1,2,11,12,0,1,6,6,37,10,16,32,3,18,0,9,1,1,16,3,0,10,16,131,58,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19512635130035766,0.0,0.0,0.15947095564908226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979006415798675,0.14295163586369874,0.12949577964613426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150824825813512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098909874849978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13189287889877035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371448256499305,0.08376495421629407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973461273392377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666370948075675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291664543743159,0.0,0.0,0.12481708626344692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329156682233107,0.0,0.0,0.37656253167531983,0.13236339719690482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443871125281046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17185042295506456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311751558125909,0.12799456464283362,0.0,0.10582463667077947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177955371622136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043208086232944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11488220491831523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476454678806748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502294501303586,0.0,0.11577234557224088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343477709413946,0.0,0.2446391132830187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934736006351357,0.0902664279185533,0.0,0.0,0.16598334027890935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134225651131566,0.1282548133873002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28272849275634376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253913159410171,0.0,0.1861702083210307,0.20511200208146824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aireux,2020/01/16,"I don't understand how to express my anger, and it's giving me repression issues I have felt from a young age, that I have been discouraged from showing anger. Every time I did I would get smacked down (metaphorically) for doing so.

​

​

If I got into an argument the other person would just out-yell me.

​

​

If I expressed resentment, disappointment, ""anger"" people older than me would tell me about how totally unacceptable my behavior was. 

​

​

I always found it odd how some people are allowed to throw these tantrums and get away with them, but if I act mildly annoyed I'm told;

​

""Your behavior is unacceptable.""  ""You need to act your age.""  ""Stop acting like your \*insert young age\*""

​

​

Long story short, I've been told/made to repress my anger for basically my entire life, and now I have no idea how to approach it from a healthy point of view. I always feel like I'm a pot of boiling water with a lid on it, where the anger is seeping out, and I'm heading towards a melt down. 

​

​

I would like advice please.",6.101947194719473,7.966611306930697,5.667940594059408,78.4118778877888,67.11881188118812,7.9609240924092415,32.77359735973597,8.447377352677275,2.730191023102312,892,39,148,13,15,274,118,202,0.195,0.721,0.084,-0.9638,1,0,0,0,0,0,79.0,0,4,1,0,9,15,8,2,8,0,16,4,1,5,1,36,29,13,0,8,5,0,2,3,0,4,1,0,0,1,7,8,2,4,7,1,0,5,2,12,0,0,8,3,25,3,23,17,2,25,0,2,1,0,11,10,0,4,13,98,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04216825593980733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181289917335866,0.5143144873884129,0.5767869291018849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04054332151076676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03635795653134373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02181926907922836,0.030828251393561032,0.04143329727667535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04731463744385813,0.0,0.0,0.04509094193500631,0.04139594004214486,0.0,0.0,0.03451310464410238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044287053515627485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04871407287533864,0.0,0.0450401400115761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030479982599090863,0.06324659388302964,0.0,0.0,0.03818872444616054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031997132407112425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05983320800623285,0.03767921680725843,0.0,0.047368635239757616,0.04079318867231806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036077535490067585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037717305419767234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02516264875991186,0.0,0.0,0.08246838489153452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04492341537129496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261757647931194,0.0,0.5767869291018849,0.0
mentalhealth,burner2of27,2020/01/16,"I told my friends that I was doing better, but now it’s back again. 
I don’t know what to do anymore, if I’m honest. I’m in college and my depression was so bad last semester that I nearly failed out of school (one F away from being suspended, but was instead put on Academic Warning). I messed up last semester. Messed up my grades, messed up my relationships with my friends, and messed up my health. I was in a really bad place, and I thought I was doing better, but now it’s back again. How am I supposed to tell people that I’m relapsing when not too long ago I was telling them that I’m doing great?

This time around it seems that doing work helps numb it, unlike last time, so I just spend hours studying and doing homework. My grades are good this semester, but emotionally I’m declining. I was with my friends today and I just didn’t feel happy. They’re great people but I don’t feel like I can talk to them. I don’t think they’d mind, but it’s not their job to listen to me, and i know stuff like this can get annoying after a while, so I’m trying to deal with it by myself. 

I’m just tired of feeling like this. I’m really trying. Like I got new medication and I’m doing counseling and I’m praying and I’m exercising and I’m *trying*. I want to grow and be a better person - growth is important to me. I want to be the kind of person I would want to be friends with, but now I’m falling back into where I was before. I’m sorry to all the friends that I’m about to annoy or let down. I hate that I can’t fix this.",1.181851851851853,2.9464959506172868,3.2263209876543217,91.16744444444448,80.23456790123456,6.418765432098766,20.67654320987653,7.42949916751922,0.52221061728395,1184,32,268,17,30,401,145,324,0.158,0.615,0.22699999999999998,0.9737,1,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,4,5,21,30,3,0,5,0,32,5,0,1,1,47,63,26,0,5,14,0,3,4,5,1,5,1,1,2,20,18,0,0,8,1,1,4,7,12,0,1,12,4,39,18,36,44,1,40,1,2,0,0,19,15,0,3,25,175,59,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736274373448202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773972249575176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773452622599608,0.0,0.0,0.0925953304306306,0.2273473089747269,0.1645780189707137,0.0,0.0,0.08386274149599797,0.0,0.0,0.2614907158175037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160550843837664,0.08488496878800722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086070721914287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949656477524612,0.1408149119517636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.380715359879725,0.0,0.051490732780632084,0.0,0.0,0.08266295786199132,0.07882315038887286,0.2173136815870688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491324908313523,0.0,0.0973023051982504,0.0,0.10475897588109892,0.0,0.0,0.06605909912643575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970564701028345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780027500834786,0.0,0.0,0.10262949370283407,0.10832610769319263,0.2410055615617989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10077879878201387,0.0,0.1925952796822796,0.0,0.0,0.0872177568845089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928343339569737,0.0,0.0,0.09951209370470457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518468742908016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678317607031159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665075922776818,0.17210822402446432,0.1029686246606614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990746362395598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262732546719001,0.0,0.0,0.10581080252136514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974255934037576,0.0,0.08972044467292345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032385299262283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282148616087324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921448809991513,0.17228220225463775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314983516649228,0.0,0.0782413771309265,0.11493600867482905,0.11327406306812028,0.0934182769758402,0.09417318394947223,0.0,0.2007363979751812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743902440394104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174895319579612,0.0,0.0,0.07001039004469498,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Confused0wl,2020/01/16,"Overslept dentist appointment I will probably delete this but I just needed to vent. Just overslept my dentist appointment. I am so upset with myself I feel like I can’t do anything at all right this week I literally hate myself for doing that I have no idea how that happened I feel like the dentist is mad at me now, I have to reschedule it now I just am seriously so upset and want to break down that I did that. I can’t stop thinking about it and it sucks so much and I feel so horribly upset with myself.",1.3358414239482208,3.8148507961165095,3.1089563106796128,88.06078074433657,84.72815533980581,5.763430420711974,23.14644012944984,7.1686216300943375,1.0363469255663436,404,15,80,6,12,134,58,103,0.324,0.608,0.068,-0.9878,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,11,9,3,3,1,0,11,3,0,1,1,19,20,9,0,2,4,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,1,3,18,2,10,18,2,9,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,6,66,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21924329925506375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4041341838959652,0.3806650648298449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23559684036562165,0.0,0.0,0.26303739996708103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30075896087135395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603214872984866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19585144475624666,0.19754916240021653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2872488862295819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275236523819704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22274142653929527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17071300023879135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571430956964148,0.0,0.21370833443579595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lesbeanuwu,2020/01/16,"Any advice? I think I have schizophrenia because most (by most I don’t mean just a few off from all but really close to all) of the symptoms line up with me, but the thing is that whenever my mom forced me to go to the doctor I said nothing to him so the only thing he thinks I have is low anxiety and low depression but the reason behind that is because my mom told him things, I never said anything, I used to cut a lot but I’m so pale that you couldn’t see the scars. I don’t want to tell anyone cause they’ll probably either laugh at me or think I’m too young to know what schizophrenia even is but I’ve been hiding all of these things from a very young age. I just don’t know what to do, and before I went to the doctor I told my best friend that I thought I had depression anxiety and probably some other disorders that I just hadn’t known the symptoms of to recognize it, she asked me if I’d been diagnosed and I said no, because my family has never paid much attention to me so they never noticed anything so I never went to the doctor, she said that I probably didn’t have it,, so I ignored everything and it just put me down about the whole thing and made me think I was stupid for thinking that 

Sorry this was a rant I just wanted to get this out there and ask if you had any advice for me cause honestly I feel dumb just thinking me having anything wrong is a possibility but ya know,,",4.0134913482336,4.444256380136988,5.0728622927180975,86.06550468637349,70.81506849315069,8.476135544340304,25.984859408795966,8.532816995589336,1.5104219178082192,1101,31,240,17,19,363,137,292,0.174,0.76,0.066,-0.9849,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,3,2,1,15,13,3,0,15,0,24,6,0,5,7,60,56,21,0,5,16,2,1,0,1,1,6,4,0,0,21,10,0,1,15,0,1,4,11,9,0,0,19,6,43,4,29,35,12,19,0,4,1,0,22,8,1,7,7,178,64,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16279615634941336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132913221655368,0.0,0.12744585450011928,0.0,0.0,0.05824406769427792,0.0,0.2056420674662036,0.0,0.15574522395463136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233350581120067,0.0,0.07088066886713842,0.0,0.08741636604687952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17114048049680072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14348930781728014,0.08454596237150977,0.0,0.0,0.09546700212909373,0.2557778414783288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05501770333790909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486308894584352,0.0,0.07852616934854975,0.0,0.04211809406490965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435601525751695,0.0,0.04351989351700911,0.0,0.04734031062453845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733560635088907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081718670551862,0.0,0.07881881079281244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073620542154708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951157889284296,0.0,0.0,0.06123379240135401,0.0,0.2569789580898645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992690991223113,0.09483560078871264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335206672023276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939062522371244,0.0,0.0,0.2694287809129071,0.0,0.0,0.08373774049305974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053362986896880266,0.08564446623636672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169428135737212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637791433651692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324556236323528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315753584938873,0.0,0.0,0.07280633516074057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766982538452473,0.32024490081790025,0.0,0.06612949976588532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15919008009069674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194293640574098,0.0,0.0687297734742183,0.09826292281025883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15443661001121514,0.0,0.0929995126125826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107355141765372,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bluesrosemary,2020/01/16,"Can’t do inpatient because I’m not suicidal enough Even though my doctor recommended me, the hospital won’t see me because while I want to die, I’m not actively suicidal in that I don’t have a plan or any intention of hurting myself. So there are really no options left for me right now. I’m so discouraged and just fucking bawling.",5.945454545454545,6.2817861212121215,7.472272727272728,70.87840909090909,66.57575757575758,12.054545454545455,37.71212121212121,11.698219412168324,4.845921212121212,268,14,49,9,4,93,51,66,0.2,0.659,0.141,-0.6447,0,0,0,0,0,2,5.0,0,0,0,1,7,3,1,0,2,0,6,2,0,1,0,9,12,6,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,0,1,7,0,4,11,1,5,0,2,1,1,0,3,1,2,2,34,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667447384781885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989438802834296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544793918692178,0.0,0.0,0.2509730870266278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533576478268233,0.0,0.1619526081855705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266838978118948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624921911718124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664110450309836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708170978062905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20939987493370968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953930407943822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5364190671533688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409082321327294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14462559932135116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jackb31qw,2020/01/16,"Feel like I'm falling down a slippery slope and can't get back up? Any advice much appreciated. I don't know what to do anymore. I feel grappled by this dark thing inside me and it won't let go. It's hard to remember what it's like being normal. It all started really in September last year when I started a new job. I'm constantly anxious in this job and feel like I will fail at it. Its good money but J don't have much of a life really to be spending it on. 

 I'm 26 and single, worst is I really liked a girl who is now seeing someone else. I've got burnout from using dating apps as most girls I speak too are really flakey. Each day I drink and sleep.  I've lost most of my friends and hardly have a social life. I have one best friend but don't want to burden him with all of this. I have been taken anti depressants since last month and weirdly I feel worse but I suppose mixing them with alcohol isn't the best. I'm going to see a counsellor tomorrow to attempt to fight this but it just seems impossible and things will never get better. I've lost pleasure in everything, especially watching tv and playing with my dog.

 My brother has mental problems and I don't want to give my parents anymore upset. Please, any suggestions on how to beat this would be much appreciated? Thanks",2.861186675919498,4.605790885496186,4.412560721721028,84.63811242192922,75.25954198473283,7.359056210964607,24.88619014573213,8.150884317080207,1.4837954198473282,1020,34,206,17,22,341,152,262,0.159,0.653,0.188,0.9284,3,0,2,0,1,0,21.0,0,0,1,9,6,23,1,1,7,0,24,5,1,2,3,38,51,17,0,5,5,2,6,4,2,4,3,1,0,2,18,14,2,0,7,3,2,3,8,10,0,1,5,10,19,13,26,38,12,26,0,4,3,0,14,8,0,3,19,128,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025391730113511,0.0,0.11214131157399754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427158815627474,0.0,0.0,0.11854425999522145,0.20813039487285587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068688959811564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22024111829436024,0.09280458437466972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339513989226252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767301162115401,0.0,0.09037851562032977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279425110131682,0.0,0.0,0.08765793698989288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430688539237957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21222882068348994,0.1499281074272584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621417294066344,0.0,0.10964617324743746,0.10066115762549137,0.11927152115611095,0.08801270160104199,0.08392439121295679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18799845718011604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20825933751802986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057668353749939415,0.17106856664338566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10730095528061437,0.14823435968385604,0.20505957346391715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229093217055004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574763897026496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375640501134904,0.0,0.23141316996602004,0.0,0.0809306879067121,0.10134480677149912,0.0,0.0,0.10281192010204088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07110521930825799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651551927553486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151847657890895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040657226367176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688906995606169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886847107724492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672358019970974,0.09552693163598566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680154331649209,0.0,0.10500863784291227,0.10696583278607384,0.08890926886771698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14854403196003144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660807617308573,0.0,0.0,0.13942545455228147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09062829698779294,0.0,0.0,0.12378423506530753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693554552874447,0.07454129064996251,0.0,0.0,0.06757331928435714
mentalhealth,richhhroddy,2020/01/16,"The education system is setting children up for failure. Opinions wanted! I’m a 3rd year university student studying psychology and for the past year I haven’t been able to get off my mind the idea that the education system is in dire need of tweaking when it comes to teaching students about mental health. IMO There’s way too much time and research going into treatment studies and into identifying risk factors for mental illnesses instead of PREVENTION strategies. I’m 20 now, and I realized that for the past 8 years, I’ve been using a variety of different coping mechanisms and distractions to deal with the increasing occurrence of unpleasant emotional states I would experience. Children turning into teenagers naturally start to experience changes in their mood states, thought processes, etc, which is normal! What isn’t normal when you think about it is that the education system teaches students next to nothing about how to manage and interact with your feelings, thoughts, and emotions. It’s like throwing a baby into a pool. And 1/3 of these kids parents will have their own, completely inadequate and lacking script of how to function that they’ll pass onto their children. 

When I was 12 I became anorexic. When I was 16, I moved on and discovered bulimia. My eating disorders tormented me throughout my whole high school experience and only ended in my first year university. The thing is it wasn’t so much about my body image. I’m still not sure what stress or emotions triggered it in me. The EDs do seem to be in my past for good as I haven’t relapsed in 2 years (nothings ever permanent, but I’ve moved from vice to vice and doubt I would go back to those) When I was 12 I had nothing in my repertoire - no tools in my toolbox - and I guess I thought I found something (starving myself), that made me feel good. And because it made me feel good, I hid my disordered eating from my family and friends the whole time, because if they knew, they’d try and take my disorder away from me - And my daily thoughts and feelings completely revolved around my obsession with food. 

I’m not sure what job I’m going into yet after university, BUT I know that I need to contribute in some way to reforming school policies so that mental health and mind management techniques are prioritized, and become considered as important as the other subjects. Because aren’t they?? Depression and anxiety can be so debilitating that people sometimes turn to suicide. Pretty sure learning about ways to manage negative affect are more important than trying to decipher Shakespeare plays for weeks on end in English class. I’m not saying that teaching children how to navigate information, stimuli, and their consequent thought processes is the end all be all for mental health disorders. I recognize that there truly are chemical imbalances in the brain and I think medication is so important for stabilizing people and giving them a second to finally get some air from whatever they are dealing with. But why do we learn all of these thought exercises SO LATE, when someones already fallen depressed and fantasized many a time about killing themselves, THEN it’s time for a therapist to come in and try to teach you how to rewire your brain. Instead of attempting to teach an adult who has been functioning with a certain maladaptive schema for their whole life how to build an newer, healthier one, why don’t we start that processes earlier, when children’s life story and development is just beginning and their minds are like an empty book waiting to be printed on. We could fully equip a child with all of the tools and information they need to be an objective observer and manager of their own mind. 

I’d love to know, anyone who works with a school board, or has younger children, what the curriculum is like now? I was in elementary school only 8 years ago but you never know, things may have changed and perhaps steps have been taken to implement this idea! 

Hopefully the world doesn’t end by the time I get my degree",9.271799214888047,9.081237940607739,8.627819133469032,67.1402253562082,59.78729281767956,12.09619075312591,40.875835998836884,11.4696683732869,4.948265745856354,3255,158,522,81,38,1030,338,724,0.085,0.846,0.07,-0.8807,4,0,1,0,0,1,63.0,3,5,14,3,36,23,1,5,31,0,50,15,3,10,10,128,101,59,2,12,11,1,4,3,1,5,8,1,0,9,32,49,3,2,25,4,0,12,13,8,0,3,21,5,63,14,95,68,17,94,0,2,0,1,43,29,0,11,47,362,95,23,0.05367349004943952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0475783104557525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05923003094543613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041060072977018566,0.0,0.0,0.03752975221337188,0.0,0.0,0.04778078558470484,0.0,0.0,0.05042801072469832,0.0412716007811999,0.0,0.09815658406444486,0.0592781528476579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059619147622736686,0.0,0.11983473156817255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11355887124300636,0.09246991820397746,0.11255126627191107,0.0,0.0,0.04285391435284265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067002289186577,0.09245779666209372,0.0,0.0,0.05607737328163996,0.24605787859904746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098427598441141,0.0,0.1811263561540866,0.19015512419172376,0.0,0.05986012935146472,0.0,0.048550744615014935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750891721083093,0.05059858960032559,0.0,0.10855571710770738,0.0,0.0,0.058796684809694,0.0,0.04565464321693815,0.0649021972187364,0.058850211466282165,0.04146800526934823,0.0,0.08412654977767671,0.051488502436828835,0.09151164390348017,0.13505633079594795,0.0,0.0,0.05912740049223141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17115723011102033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05670898911632345,0.0,0.05330988631168087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118167421230867,0.0,0.0,0.05326265691868996,0.0,0.059381764350560536,0.0,0.08849263934442565,0.0,0.0605460346284373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582234667119672,0.07866646825635819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048442420322580726,0.10157430811095293,0.0,0.05441649452275172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05407039448726767,0.21636101532099009,0.0,0.21677969743139447,0.0,0.0,0.11409285139178076,0.07891238187451119,0.11939463833200935,0.04139630439183158,0.0,0.057082365580047575,0.0,0.10517724857494444,0.1545034838534067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03637054593834072,0.08164221560538157,0.0,0.0,0.05959805887059973,0.0,0.15371225860254215,0.07442087975525498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054605235348264634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04268331358346062,0.0,0.21728174968363026,0.0,0.04886232950570262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04547737394183151,0.0413204748895292,0.05308445408648255,0.0,0.07598074502586095,0.0,0.042863718486355964,0.0,0.061482801507839614,0.0,0.0,0.05871008655413875,0.0,0.15175988751580047,0.0,0.040355784768924284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06231905883128343,0.07131656366579632,0.06878361036628175,0.0,0.255664534273426,0.15648721839300705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932232956945244,0.1167626888862626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046356662295327415,0.0,0.0,0.03165801506333495,0.1278105543177794,0.04305363618264909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968639527845771,0.17977360454809746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03907494000417321,0.0,0.0,0.07625621472692112,0.0,0.0,0.20738380702406026
mentalhealth,HolySheeshkebabs,2020/01/16,"Hi hi hi! I really didn't know where or how to ask anyone about this, so I though reddit was the best option, and this subreddit was the best I could find to talk about how I feel. If you have a better suggestion of a subreddit to ask please tell me about it.

Lately I've been numb. I stay up all night and wake up until 5pm. There are days where I don't eat anything, because of me just feeling fat, and then days where I just can't control my cravings at all, and eat much more than necessary. I don't get that much out of bed, and when I do, I just play videogames. I'm not interested in anyone, or anything, in that matter. I don't feel well either. There are days where I'm excessively stressed about small things, and end up playing games and try to forget why I was so stressed. I also have some trouble doing stuff by myself. For example, I can't and won't order food when there's nothing at home, 'cause it just stresses me out, or clean my room, 'cause I find it overwhelming even if it's just a scarf on the floor. I also have a lot of trouble when I'm alone. I have this weird problem, where I feel the need to even out every single one of my movements. For example, let's say my right hand stroke my cat... well my brain suddenly has the intense urge of stroking it with the left one, and if I don't, I get really anxious. This only happens when I become aware of me. It's not as often as you think though. Finally I'm sad that I don't have anyone to talk to. My parents are separated, and I only talk to my dad abt unimportant stuff, and my mom is just a very complicated person, and scolds me when I talk abt stress, 'cause it's just ""unreasonable for you to be stressed, wait until you're an adult, then you'll see"".

If any of you can tell me what is wrong with me, or has any kind of advice or something, please PLEASE tell me. Again, if there's a better subreddit to ask this, feel free to tell me abt it.",5.175542740841248,4.388095703980103,5.831388511985526,85.80012211668931,68.32835820895522,9.100135685210313,27.97421981004071,8.296473431620573,1.5392298507462687,1491,39,340,18,22,487,180,402,0.109,0.7879999999999999,0.10300000000000001,-0.1749,1,1,1,0,0,0,54.0,0,5,0,5,39,24,0,6,13,0,32,10,4,6,2,64,52,41,0,8,20,3,8,0,0,2,4,1,4,2,20,17,4,2,9,3,1,1,11,13,2,2,5,10,48,12,46,42,11,42,0,2,1,0,27,21,0,14,18,232,68,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337412580441607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776746408273072,0.0,0.12009405823710376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212343966255663,0.0,0.0,0.08482691239686424,0.0,0.15750768247334998,0.0,0.12358037001446942,0.0,0.21058856508915216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0457723248110297,0.08292766783406323,0.0,0.0,0.15759830166805378,0.13281666019248575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382190011899285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23140502996732554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421643051836489,0.059950841990217996,0.0,0.0,0.14527466691304175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366544780400276,0.0,0.0,0.06650477544586375,0.0,0.0,0.09918848151479297,0.0,0.06326401737672849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898311607509919,0.0,0.0,0.0822541140944992,0.13725627501654458,0.0,0.09079547175648688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784596937303139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06639916660064342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531836107687345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819153281355473,0.041265839373535916,0.0,0.08470138165810134,0.0,0.08158222121719055,0.0767815222268495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383626349620837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794096104170135,0.0,0.0,0.11039513678676936,0.055676042707844375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046404225135709,0.0,0.0720479804261596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176175901666697,0.11421406052175186,0.0,0.0,0.08337520304112027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655630528844746,0.0,0.2472688606965436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07184809715648174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620528154159233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412386887978742,0.0,0.05971217861668295,0.0,0.0,0.059834599862527975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780562402460241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003272782788,0.0,0.0,0.43005939760412204,0.0,0.17191325064440655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24140827444820226,0.26251731319635224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04988445167938165,0.04811270357514194,0.1475451491480684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05097912917248699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061954620532716075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502442147645524,0.0,0.06775431854512627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209582300986508,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IHaveNoEmpathy,2020/01/16,"Doubting my so-called ""DID"" I have been experiencing this personality switchibg for awhile now as I have 17 Alters, yet most of them have Dormanted or maybe have merged and made 2 new ones.

Though Im starting to doubt it, I realized that I can't really hear them when I talk to hem as it was just a one sided conversation, yet I can somewhat ""feel"" their emotions and presense. 

I started arguing with them and they are angry with me for easily giving up on them, I cant except this and just find this as a joke, they arent happy with me at the moment...",8.043243243243246,5.803151702702702,8.482414414414414,73.7884864864865,63.50450450450451,11.762882882882886,33.91171171171171,10.355215969177356,3.099092252252252,433,13,90,8,5,145,77,111,0.131,0.804,0.065,-0.8019,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,7,0,7,5,1,2,3,0,12,0,0,1,0,19,18,10,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,6,7,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,3,0,2,4,3,18,2,15,14,2,12,0,0,0,0,13,4,0,5,8,70,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27853902320529816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520404559790488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263200736879051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23753954111776035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635959543641144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790855881290388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674719496340263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23430390665986314,0.0,0.0,0.2487674401609583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23915281189925094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355872625347997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21621211792655368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863162835385367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35053323466481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19902747053058772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432852634494032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,synthetichxppiness,2020/01/16,"Maybe someone can help me?? I need to figure out what exactly is the matter with me, if anything. I’ve tried reaching out to people around me but that never seems to work. So I’d like to hear your opinions.

Sooooo, when I was in eighth grade (last year) I started feeling like I wanted to hurt other people. When this girl irked me too many times, I would get thoughts about strangling her and (this is gonna sound weird) stabbing her in the throat with a flag in the room. I told a teacher about these thoughts so I wasn’t able to go back to school for the last two months until I was evaluated. And before I went to a hospital... I got urges to kill dogs and chop them up. I used to hurt my own dog but that got old. Now, there’s this girl I got to school with. She’s one of those “UwU I’m insane and that makes me so quirky.” She said exactly this: “ I want the whole world to know I’m crazy when they see my wallpaper.” And she was DEAD serious. She looked like she was joking but she insisted that she was “crazy.” That was yesterday. I missed the part of school where I see her due to my appointment today. I feel like the next time I see I will hurt (not kill) her. 



Anyone???",0.6307407407407409,2.8341278765432136,1.7109465020576171,98.82592592592596,85.04938271604941,5.0814814814814815,17.23045267489712,6.42735559955562,-0.4388831275720162,906,20,212,9,27,284,136,243,0.162,0.743,0.094,-0.977,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,2,1,14,13,2,0,10,0,12,1,1,2,3,34,41,16,3,5,5,0,2,4,0,3,0,3,1,2,13,11,0,0,7,1,0,2,3,8,0,2,15,9,40,5,29,23,3,31,0,4,4,0,20,10,0,3,23,131,53,5,0.11262151538732165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874758213947683,0.0,0.0926779111887569,0.10025702584254338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659899362157909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583261462805427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388964415548633,0.1609136661910908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058840093508246635,0.0,0.06400540255845548,0.0,0.2702211420794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269326329239345,0.0,0.07548782780446378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616909845471368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24919804102072915,0.0,0.061893839549797214,0.18360313286818286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22008473474308035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457370847190187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517573604143632,0.11418053995693513,0.11314344956708362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898934191102293,0.0,0.0,0.08350742663765914,0.08686065556289638,0.0,0.11977425927765208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11817733542095565,0.0,0.07631525349417635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195812627791278,0.0,0.15615515679666492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712885120086447,0.0,0.0,0.341936958443156,0.26923429982083225,0.1025263978403121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542384451704647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971408825090479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17881780654437954,0.1313410226011658,0.0,0.10675202809903077,0.10761468424159873,0.0,0.07646261627756465,0.0,0.1100148559871898,0.0,0.0,0.09726882956910693,0.0,0.0,0.1328541753965809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044012730707277,0.0,0.12573789998376336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08198980451774475,0.0,0.0,0.08000309326202025,0.0,0.0,0.07252456346801146
mentalhealth,slayerbizkit,2020/01/16,"The Mental Health system in the USA, as far as getting help initially, is fundamentally flawed. We are ignored , at society's peril......... Hi ,

​

I'm going to get straight to the point. Mental Health treatment in it's current iteration here in the USA is fundamentally broken/flawed. A person in crisis, essentially, cannot simply ask for help and receive any in return. A person has to make a scene & spectacle of themselves, threatening to harm themselves or others. The fatal flaw in this system is that many people, MANY PEOPLE, are pushed to the edge, and end up killing themselves or others, after having the door slammed in their face so many times, simply because they didn't put on a show for mental health workers. 

​

Why must people in crisis become a spectacle for your amusement before getting the help they ask for? Answer this one question",7.587337662337659,8.889996954545452,7.196519480519482,70.89620779220782,63.22077922077922,8.497662337662339,32.932467532467534,8.548686976883017,2.8963735064935068,697,27,104,9,10,219,96,154,0.15,0.7759999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.9413,1,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,1,1,3,1,3,5,1,0,13,0,10,4,1,1,1,10,18,7,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,6,3,0,1,2,2,0,4,2,4,0,1,1,0,5,1,24,16,0,25,0,0,0,0,15,14,0,3,5,65,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665539825085479,0.27405222693575193,0.07668647097224242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21084671566301946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874265241263819,0.12454398741691272,0.0959577177081696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987945076265664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675071596555691,0.0,0.06408895733816343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3596030390495337,0.0,0.0,0.2267591163711127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476167621276504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075273872945717,0.3429887850856944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34093248028787704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641487796241148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345385103922041,0.19693027060154095,0.0,0.0,0.10660271582916467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336352481118153,0.12632656777893686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575623976858243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175606304533699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27405222693575193,0.0
mentalhealth,DESTRUCTlVE,2020/01/16,"a friend of mine has gotten beyond bored to the point she's cut herself and is talking about killing herself. this friend of mine is an online friend, but we are very close and i doubt she ever lies. we have been friends for five years. today she opened up and told me she cut and stabbed herself with pens and scissors, solely out of boredom. i'm shaking as i'm writing this. she said she's bored beyond understanding and that it started five months ago. 

she doesn't know what to do. she's so bored that she's gotten to the point that she's not motivated to do anything, and is trapped in an endless cycle of boredom. she's not sleepy, she doesn't have the motivation to draw like she used to. not even to watch videos or hang out with friends. even speaking.

she doesn't have depression, most likely. she claims she's bored and tired all the time. she said she can't do this shit anymore and wanted to shoot herself in the head. 

please, someone help me with this. i'm extremely worried for her. she's a great and funny person, i promise you. i just want to give her a big hug and comfort her right now, but i don't know how. please someone give me advice on how to help her. i'm sorry if i made any spelling mistakes too, as i don't type very well on mobile.",2.887607930331661,4.500204416342413,3.3244913841022767,93.0250064850843,74.87548638132296,5.673448211969613,24.68945710579952,5.916634753146586,0.43973092458773344,993,32,214,5,21,308,130,257,0.22,0.602,0.17800000000000002,-0.8774,0,1,0,1,0,0,29.0,2,1,0,2,13,24,4,2,10,0,18,4,2,6,2,45,37,20,1,4,8,0,0,2,5,0,1,3,0,1,9,20,0,0,5,1,0,2,9,12,1,2,7,4,41,12,31,30,2,25,0,1,1,1,46,15,1,4,10,141,50,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004733805967376,0.10889887668464507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354203168066758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12183392522109192,0.0,0.0,0.101094863441451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581029570819893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622821811025298,0.1111246175018172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4745669979585178,0.0,0.0,0.23569731769940755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354422652118227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260792690275463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16468717400937347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13591502874702213,0.0,0.13503000179643465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200363491095753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624338850356784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805748546409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726764901876472,0.0,0.2697042332587654,0.2322654139677087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104913001425398,0.23371645829896015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610348634727528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20818036157205416,0.0,0.0,0.13752021913291362,0.08695367388753386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874196256298576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716346677099914,0.1411976970768508,0.11644718319977287,0.11738818525529195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278909054140414,0.0,0.1061027262728334,0.0,0.20272779249935927,0.1449199118438189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11045666434584167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475986794157745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911120078026662
mentalhealth,Synesth3sia,2020/01/16,"Verbal abuse and loss of feeling (On mobile) (apologies in advance for punctuation errors)

For some background I work as a commercial truck driver, by that virtue I'm pretty isolated and only stay in contact with direct family and a few friends. 

I'll try to summarize, I met a much younger woman then me online around February of last year, we hit it off pretty well, talked a lot about music, shows, and psychology. She was very shy at the time but very sweet, found out from her that her family also worked in trucking, so they understood what my lifestyle was. Everything seemed to be going okay, I had met the family, the dad seem apathetic but I wasn't rude about it (we work crazy hours and he worked overnight). 

We hung out at her parent's house a few times, and that was pretty uneventful, I do remember sometime in either May or June where I was scrolling through facebook and one of my close friends posted something naughty and kind of cute, (which was stuff we'd been sharing for over a decade at this point), and she got upset with the sexuality of the image and pulled me into her room, apparently she was very jealous of the gif. This should have set my red flags off right there. From then on it was some good times, permeated by her being upset about things I reacted to on FB or watched, a constant self loathing diatribe about how everyone was more attractive then her, and no matter how much a protested what she said, she would just ignore what I said. 

Things had been up and down until around November, she had been doing much better with the social comparison and anxiety, and we had talked about having a child together, around that time we decided to go through with it, around mid November she came back positive, everything was actually progressive very nicely, we were in good spirits. Then it happened, early in December, she brought up my close friend that I'd known for over 15 years (she'd brought her up multiple times before as justification for me cheating), and proceeded to yell, spam, or otherwise shout at me for being a liar, cheater, scum, unworthy of fatherhood. I recognized that she really hadn't been disciplined at all throughout her early life and which led to her developmentally being behind, because her parents wouldn't sit her down and force her to continue her studies. Over the course of the argument she just kept going on and on repeating herself over and over, not listening to reason or anything I say, until I said I felt like striking her (I meant a slap, but she took it as punching or something else), because she wouldn't stop escalating and ignoring me, of course that was flipped to say I was abusive, and then retroactively said I was abusive to my exes (even though I never touched anyone). I'm pretty tall at 6'4"" and have dated pretty petite women all my life, and I already well know I could never get away with anything of the sort because who would people listen to? The tiny woman or the 6ft tall man? You get the idea. After that she just escalated to say she was going to put the baby up for adoption, with out any say from me, I was furious, because this time she had been starting arguments based on her own insecurities, and essentially expected me to just take it all and agree with everything. It took family stepping in to diffuse the situation. 

There were a few small arguments since then but nothing to serious, I'd been functioning okay, but early this past week she went nuclear over a post I made about my trans friend who had taken up cocaine and meth and fell off the face of the earth. The comic in the post was romantic, but I wasn't really paying attention to that (I cared about the acceptance part of it). I had posted it earlier in the day, she only saw it after getting online around noon, but she just started spamming, saying everything from being worthless, to saying I wanted to fuck that friend, to that she wanted to kill me, and again that I was vile, and scum, and unworthy. Her mom eventually calmed her down, and it seemed okay for a time, her parents took away her phone later because she was always looking up stuff that upset her or supported/fed her anxieties.

For me even just a day after the phone was gone, I started losing it, I was already a pretty battered and depressed person before all of this, I thought having a child would give me a sense of purpose and a reason to live, but something broke in me, I've never wanted to leave someone in the way I am now, her mother plays it off as Pregnancy Psychosis, but I can't handle being yelled at for not doing anything really bad. Being constantly accused of cheating and lying hit me all at once, I loved her, I thought she was beautiful, wanted to make her happy, but nothing ever seemed to be enough, and everything I did was either not said right or just wrong to her. I'm feeling severely disconnected and I am not feeling anything for the baby either, I just suddenly stopped feeling, and I don't know what to do about it.

I know everything is disjointed, but I feel very alone in my situation, I feel abused, and disrespected. It does feel as if everyone expects me to be the responsible adult, but would never let me be one. I feel rudderless and stagnant with not control over my life, even though I continue to do my job, eat and take care of myself.

P.S. Sorry again for being so incoherent, I wasn't sure how to summarize things properly and ended up with a wall of text even though I didn't want to.",10.955944325077331,7.72821328944821,10.251199206667774,66.44181569192267,58.89351403678606,13.601766108658182,41.36162727551768,11.63996503585485,4.666733780369748,4340,167,781,91,41,1402,419,1033,0.155,0.715,0.13,-0.9897,6,1,5,0,3,1,126.0,7,1,1,10,44,52,10,4,45,3,79,7,1,11,11,181,152,84,1,16,37,6,10,1,5,8,3,16,1,9,47,68,1,7,30,3,1,18,19,24,2,2,68,31,125,28,154,59,21,151,1,5,4,2,105,70,1,18,56,580,172,6,0.0,0.20755385696013787,0.04273640878194127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045357145203295035,0.09665504329468357,0.03502186744651025,0.03643993050417319,0.0,0.0,0.029781269944117436,0.0,0.06700423869325019,0.0,0.0,0.030621626961193683,0.0,0.14415418718193582,0.19492873064670801,0.0,0.0,0.0822913897234094,0.033674711093960245,0.036565974320843055,0.1334813991451268,0.0,0.07453055690417182,0.0,0.0,0.0387320366738371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050088413809315564,0.08930134820225616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465102928990153,0.04911844448805839,0.034965767204616215,0.0,0.0,0.05648672607287605,0.0,0.03771951574505426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038324229156938484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04481196674589296,0.03658408098180242,0.0,0.03878828752087878,0.04525067819950582,0.0,0.11570150606363545,0.0396139783134368,0.0,0.0836936608556748,0.2361541362353198,0.0,0.1651395007027675,0.0,0.17714759505354194,0.0,0.042048893463443884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04801761578020144,0.16917481641810014,0.04048664092392843,0.06864132249470177,0.04201098119292455,0.09955605022511622,0.07346428431622773,0.035025883906408734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0387266921508367,0.046619289694728776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043128048516411534,0.05053213850706531,0.0,0.049437843356451294,0.0,0.0,0.0434585659359894,0.0,0.04845132538851373,0.045604479319522606,0.0722037431904747,0.035697773130595634,0.0,0.0463712862584456,0.0,0.044782103848318655,0.09279851896785628,0.02139542721203555,0.0,0.03867070721141158,0.0,0.0367757427273627,0.04899403417149984,0.0,0.03723190291447725,0.039525593342097334,0.04143873045219204,0.029232686046369576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05129074203888711,0.0,0.0,0.09658039466829607,0.0,0.13510584172810344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840426198369289,0.0,0.0,0.04663894296688022,0.05935159303833646,0.06661428128647706,0.0,0.0,0.14588341931790205,0.047424392550285466,0.04180611527914202,0.03036109064926492,0.03823903665534063,0.0,0.0,0.04139927443047338,0.0,0.1677693296425113,0.2673240906238079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044024841558304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416624437368421,0.09005459268904116,0.0,0.0,0.04960981197372212,0.0747992921225635,0.2082895518267332,0.20895941416122946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15947283830405254,0.045686460220400855,0.0494745023270747,0.0,0.03622666468185448,0.09845207991366904,0.0,0.04464224031855628,0.03710632492599547,0.10114376674267302,0.04331316501193695,0.04902354762482067,0.0929923817717013,0.04667833907047827,0.0,0.07322711664077315,0.0,0.0,0.100266793624049,0.0,0.0,0.04127511631092675,0.0,0.06585493982984088,0.07039955774934101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728391795577059,0.0,0.12908148991777768,0.06953473385789045,0.17875552383118093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14596949206127918,0.029733099715765262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18067226137964448,0.129153520930507,0.03476146155341028,0.0351287261107547,0.0,0.0787517294428336,0.04059726980040049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275295642279768,0.0,0.0,0.12443936999980874,0.047881620016324296,0.0,0.05640351278614169
mentalhealth,CovfefeMan69,2020/01/16,"Not necessarily looking for advice but references on inspiration maybe?? Hello everybody, I am making this post as I've run into a dilemma that I am not sure how to approach.

A little back story I'll try to keep it short. I am a mental health patient with drug resistant depression (some work but most SSRI's don't get processed by my body) and ADHD.  Been to the hospital for suicide stuff twice and am happy to now say that I am moving forward in life and therapy is going great and I am pretty sure the meds are all figured out.

Back to the problem though, I am working on becoming a tattoo artist and I am running into the issue of not being able to motivate myself enough to start getting things done. This could perhaps be me rushing things a bit too fast, but I need to see progress in my creative endeavours and I have hit a wall. The wall is that i don't have the desire to improve yet I have the need. 

I want to be an artist because I have never been allowed to express myself, but I struggle with a little bit of fear that I am not good enough and a whole lot of just me scraping by doing everything I can to be a good roommate/best friend and playing video games.

In summary, how does reddit find inspiration and meaning in the things that they enjoy, and how do they apply that to something thats hopefully going to be a career for me one day soon?",6.916491596638656,5.936320102941183,7.5614075630252096,75.4554411764706,64.88235294117646,9.977310924369748,34.50210084033613,9.04235418022936,2.943089495798319,1076,41,204,15,14,359,154,272,0.12300000000000001,0.6970000000000001,0.18,0.9665,1,0,2,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,2,4,11,16,0,2,19,0,30,5,1,6,4,51,45,19,1,7,9,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,14,15,0,1,7,5,0,8,7,4,0,2,3,3,25,12,34,35,9,32,0,1,2,0,7,15,0,4,10,161,39,4,0.11414452989090924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13717954328500262,0.11154071355025223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554019552952618,0.0,0.06958144597027541,0.1260636653842492,0.0,0.0,0.11978764196264295,0.0,0.2492325269336433,0.1267888406665119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09113511909296072,0.0,0.0,0.07361377883828292,0.0,0.09831251633742202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09988864731394767,0.11680948421271264,0.0,0.0,0.13237141618362194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358836242669235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258574338417392,0.0,0.0,0.12844433019555548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432603241777648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818778064596766,0.0,0.1192716114525313,0.0,0.1297419335974546,0.19147803224390952,0.0,0.12584474717031693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150897457778165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133029763518302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337127334145047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913723352622535,0.0,0.10145690279138743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062365711673776,0.0,0.2288056115892833,0.0,0.0,0.09585265707391104,0.0,0.0,0.09704159746623464,0.0,0.0,0.07619236004898247,0.0,0.11467352234300007,0.12433685566677816,0.1267888406665119,0.0,0.11503083905008757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12131757105819295,0.0,0.16927344518804524,0.08803529823892903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734728753773244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093189071731414,0.11612602259828665,0.0,0.10922089955011764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077231159521458,0.0,0.0,0.09095841198095088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787403570719884,0.0,0.0,0.0807920857554567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932864607646004,0.13066817788557822,0.1248555892937828,0.0,0.21515973715431605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13053421772467486,0.0,0.2274976611052077,0.0,0.11214642107438537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749664315220295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732540111245153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743829128703538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619715443074334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VegaVortexCN,2020/01/16,"After Years of Struggling with Depression I've Decided to Try and Make a Difference I'm spending the next month fundraising for an amazing Australian charity that helps with mental health, beyondblue. 

A little bit about me:

A couple years ago I was starting to notice a change in myself. I was lethargic, bored all the time and got annoyed at every little thing. I started just not caring about anything. It wasn't until one time driving home thinking I couldn't really care if a car hit me and I didn't make it out alive. I realized at that moment that I wasn't my normal self. I still didn't get help but took time of work and seemed to get better or so I thought with nothing popping up. Then my mum died suddenly while I was home and I went off the deep end. Everything crumbled around me and I didn't even know the worst would come a year down the track. I had a blow up at my boss and that was it, I broke down and went to the doctor who finally prescribed me medication. It took time but I felt much better, I still go through bad patches and sometimes really bad patches but as a whole I've picked up my life from where I was at.

​

Alright a little about my charity efforts:

I got an amazing response from my friends and family when I decided to post it on Facebook and I smashed my original goal of $500. I've still got a month to run on my fundraising so I'm really hoping to hit $1500 by the end with the amazing help of family and friends.

My fundraising consists of 2 fundraising events:

\- 24 hour stream on 14/2/2020 from 10am Western Australia Time

\- Fundraising Day at my sport club on 16/2/2020

​

How can you help?

\- Checking out beyondblue and the work they do.

\- checking out the 24 hour stream (don't mind you leaving once it's done, it's more about joining in on something that can help on the day)

\- Know of any gaming company that might help out with raffle donations? Please let me know as I would love to be able to do some giveaways 

\- If you are in Western Australia and would like to come to the charity day just contact me. I would love to meet you and have you come down for the day.

\- Just reading this post I hope it helps with anyone that is currently struggling.

​

Fundraising Link

 [https://beyondblue-individual.everydayhero.com/au/david-s-beyond-blue-fundraiser?utm\_source=EDH&utm\_medium=email&utm\_campaign=IND-Event-Reg&utm\_term=visitmypage&utm\_content=qrt2](https://beyondblue-individual.everydayhero.com/au/david-s-beyond-blue-fundraiser?utm_source=EDH&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=IND-Event-Reg&utm_term=visitmypage&utm_content=qrt2) 

Twitch Link

 [https://www.twitch.tv/vegavortexcn](https://www.twitch.tv/vegavortexcn) ;

Beyondblue Website

 [https://www.beyondblue.org.au/](https://www.beyondblue.org.au/)",8.604517663786503,12.183712813901348,6.008492836049437,71.3596997703161,64.35874439461884,6.772744175872253,28.1426227715192,7.765008861874849,1.7809622224652741,2329,77,351,27,41,656,212,446,0.10800000000000001,0.7340000000000001,0.157,0.9836,1,0,1,0,1,0,161.0,0,5,1,6,17,24,1,2,25,1,28,7,0,6,1,69,62,30,1,10,10,1,1,1,2,5,5,0,2,1,18,29,0,0,12,4,4,11,8,9,0,1,21,1,46,15,65,31,7,80,0,2,0,2,23,31,0,8,37,225,64,6,0.05328976201213953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04723815870351097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6351337836351836,0.1942586810996011,0.036238865552059116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03726144064757046,0.0,0.04385293355400048,0.04743918627643959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898945073058044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426092790632344,0.058178618189901464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866492789567574,0.0,0.05637350223856177,0.13771323412637182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05896410807895969,0.0,0.13746995178325394,0.0,0.04589839393480258,0.0,0.055306359600214086,0.05567645915501094,0.0,0.05454432949998532,0.0,0.054533928348606577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09439782380679763,0.0,0.0,0.03519738522130283,0.0,0.044898922863816894,0.0,0.047893401952820464,0.0,0.10047368991535983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051166528482294964,0.05837632950131015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234307587921763,0.0,0.05568340239505401,0.0,0.03028579981454638,0.0,0.1278620723805395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05664452507728888,0.0,0.0,0.2500330292373487,0.0,0.10690795255957312,0.10585751557526504,0.10495936235369537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785997866259085,0.0,0.0,0.056426163536648866,0.0,0.05449239214925163,0.03764013487466712,0.0260346859492798,0.1602310237768918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961921815743493,0.0,0.07114265988977356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368382885992495,0.05370354622244671,0.0565320161836194,0.0538074684287428,0.0,0.08507075924820869,0.0,0.03917410667752625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056674266459079366,0.0,0.05221265228409493,0.05113296388347716,0.060670747252985324,0.0,0.056751857353241286,0.03611052188930658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05849615607413657,0.0,0.0,0.10207372271367764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053304182978557116,0.0,0.10241635832195813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048512997912361897,0.0555928438439084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04102506229915996,0.05270493724569236,0.0,0.07543753566618436,0.0,0.12767181834025942,0.0,0.0,0.11142005940578728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035403349975688496,0.034145927751098086,0.0,0.04230611851345918,0.1553684438709633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184137727602383,0.03618025037439402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880028654506602,0.0,0.05949611619943861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775911628456799,0.0,0.0,0.15142207190183155,0.0,0.1942586810996011,0.10295057868702023
mentalhealth,helloyousexythink,2020/01/16,"Its hard not to be an asshole to men when i get hit on constantly and when approached i never know if you are going to be creepy or nice. And i feel bad for being mean to nice guys, but i have ptsd pretty bad from other life expiriences, and cant take a chance someone will try to hurt me. Like to the guys who have offered me cigarettes and who have stopped me on the street to "" just tell me im beautiful"" its very flattering but its everyday almost.
I dont show skin at all, i cant stand other women and their asshole glares when i look even a little pudgy in puffy coats because i used to be huge and now im at my goal wieght...
Id rather large ladies hate me than skinny bitches...
Men you dont get it at all. You dont get how every guy stares at you and keeps trying to look at you out of the corner of their eye. Looking at you more than anyone. Men just fucking staring and looking down ashamed when they meet my etes or not meeting them at all because my breats are the focus.. all the time all day long everyday everywhere i go.
My co-workers comment in ways i cant report. 
It might not be offensive, it migt be with theb
 intent of flattering. But im exhausted and i want to feel safe and not constantly paid attention to..so i can rekax and not worry about my safety. You staring at me the whole walk there or bus ride or elevator ride is whats fucking creepy gentlemen...doesnt matter how nice you are. You stare too much, so much im worried about you now, and guess what? Lesbians dont. Maybe i cant understand because men need a visual fufillment that women dont... But whatever the case...im tired and i dont want to leave my house anymore",2.2948235413085243,3.960886240469212,3.5987946202851653,90.20439882697949,76.62463343108504,6.814885226008697,23.78208110021236,7.6298220110432995,0.9964372737384974,1292,41,279,18,29,422,178,341,0.10099999999999999,0.762,0.13699999999999998,0.8726,0,0,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,10,4,1,17,17,5,1,11,0,26,9,3,4,6,58,52,29,0,5,17,0,4,1,0,2,3,0,0,9,13,15,1,3,6,1,1,6,16,10,0,0,1,13,40,7,35,42,9,41,0,1,9,3,32,18,3,8,16,177,53,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974533913822222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897888835752108,0.05568431241058098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329877828019713,0.14563863521199966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721194465480639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0513595261557965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5600065443074732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05259974280748552,0.0,0.0670979329890825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053411105691292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472469614054211,0.12482174284580914,0.0,0.09051952416056017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772955979874135,0.2365606000813599,0.0,0.0,0.07133945606591957,0.07862543194263806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918908518795595,0.08525346951368712,0.0,0.430110217157315,0.0,0.0,0.07078536837577064,0.0,0.0,0.04376662500795074,0.0,0.0,0.08432449373666819,0.0,0.0,0.056250241351686166,0.038906804479809765,0.07981758292036974,0.0,0.0704765811471835,0.2675013904070874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000645888714718,0.08674846056709158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844826822490004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708528477301534,0.0590501131229523,0.06142126207742288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101985238534776,0.0,0.0,0.09309184331931247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747649927961616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658042116962545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05987740376943582,0.0,0.06960658609629422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046437200585375885,0.09153146082698076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081371160066597,0.0,0.0,0.08290532807104561,0.0,0.06878113265680125,0.0,0.06570918429213396,0.09394438796521104,0.06321245071143805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891229818516917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057976965961470665,0.16175126367759995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Brazilbaby,2020/01/16,"Yesterday I did an interview and now I can’t stop thinking about everything I did wrong I know it’s normal to rehearse what happened in your head right after an interview for a team leader position 
 But since my interview I haven’t been able to stop thinking about my mistakes and what they probably think of me , that I appear too sensitive for the job.  My boyfriend has been very positive but since the interview my self esteem has taken a major dump.  I’m usually really bubbly and try my best to let things go.  This time everything is getting to me . I’m more than qualified  and have more than enough experience to get the job but during the interview I got so nervous I started rambling and stumbling on my words.  I feel like a failure and logically I know I should be proud that I put myself out there.  Any ideas on how to overcome my anxiety ? Or have an experience like mine ?",4.6411085972850685,6.320727264705884,5.682941176470589,77.61015837104074,70.47058823529412,9.70135746606335,31.312217194570128,10.035473477838034,3.3578733031674206,705,31,129,19,13,233,105,170,0.11800000000000001,0.775,0.107,0.4107,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,1,3,7,8,1,1,10,0,14,1,1,1,0,27,30,12,0,3,4,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,2,8,1,0,3,2,4,0,0,6,1,25,4,18,21,5,16,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,2,10,93,32,9,0.1511438219319673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102782981856237,0.0,0.11562461007912198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15861611628481462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15617197134606806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27167664268510777,0.2956953201500686,0.0,0.0,0.0764228577325189,0.10797717658816104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793281745651058,0.0,0.08589851711468029,0.0,0.12088352164989448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365598257430136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551171662958815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706229776719552,0.0,0.0,0.2999738427863238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612938356276866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15455479823267362,0.0,0.14768247365324091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14808885462136687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16295860365872167,0.0,0.0,0.15194128724536388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682660258836903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290759980940875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767596951777044,0.0,0.0,0.25005546275856605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698037509642863,0.0,0.0,0.2527260058149338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041323928790696,0.29054057452188176,0.0,0.0,0.08813317803494883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261673375076592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16646356641973895,0.12470948215542675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16525204232793975,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marblemilk,2020/01/16,"am i a bad person? so recently i've realized that i'm not a great person. i think i'm a compulsive liar, and i always lie to get myself out of trouble or out of bad situations. but i've also found that i tend to blame everything that goes wrong in my life on others, and i react extremely badly to criticism or accusatory remarks, oftentimes with me faking feeling bad and other things to make other people see me in a better light. i've just come to realize this, and hate myself for this. but it's not just that, i think there's a pattern: i really hate being put in vulnerable situations, like when i have to say sorry to someone or confront someone i hurt or something like that because i really don't want to feel like a bad person or be put in the uncomfortably vulnerable position. has anyone experienced this, does anybody know what this is, and do you have any tips? i really really want to get better or become a better person and i really hate hurting people without realizing that i'm doing it.

edit: i also oftentimes stay tucked deep within my comfort zone, and i never really want to go out, for example if i don't feel like doing something or it might make me in the slightest bit uncomfortable, i just won't do it at all. this has also lead to some more heated arguments because i really dislike saying sorry (i mean i do want to say sorry but i really don't like the process of doing it). :(",6.111868279569888,6.000763688172044,8.00130600358423,68.75529233870971,66.24014336917564,11.132706093189961,31.415994623655912,10.820120047756994,3.5442059139784945,1115,39,198,29,16,397,133,279,0.302,0.6,0.098,-0.9965,0,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,4,9,25,5,0,10,0,19,1,0,4,2,52,45,23,0,5,17,0,3,5,0,2,1,3,0,4,21,12,0,0,11,0,0,5,8,15,0,0,1,9,28,10,30,40,4,21,0,2,1,0,8,12,0,10,8,141,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19252282575552054,0.06677274231319602,0.0,0.0,0.05457137366138903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05611124878672418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33501852870945753,0.09783683937269512,0.08862758174212718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21291843329321386,0.0876100027961278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912652335315328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022554221268516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212170397905733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172735944046922,0.11465833631361536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798776069614776,0.0,0.0,0.08385250786818066,0.0,0.045606772539261466,0.0,0.0,0.08847367385882883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23768477952106495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718142302823846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044102187457552997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05668151675332525,0.1960255313530828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713229062131473,0.0,0.0,0.08741356841860701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513041818475726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06189218413633464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126768104229952,0.2802777398930005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16134275560241584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4112712524805636,0.0,0.07923519244194828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19144922784781754,0.0,0.0,0.06394724497660864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18040416848546806,0.0,0.0,0.1359876947179944,0.12355762080869075,0.0,0.2694931083188505,0.0,0.08553366220070281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331318767726844,0.10283932203358327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18932933521258125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735618260152577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773856126103867,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bean1713,2020/01/16,"Did I wake up from a 2-year dissociative episode? Hi everyone. Not sure if this is the right forum to post this, so feel free to redirect me to the right one.  I grew up very privileged,  in a nice house, and lived comfortably. My mom is a single mom and has an executive-level well paying job. She ran 5 miles every day and always was put together.  Due to her job, she worked lots of hours and I didn't see her that much growing up. (she is an amazing mom and I understand the sacrifices she had to make to raise us). My life was normal, I had never faced a single hardship. However, in my second semester of junior year in HS my mom lost her job. She became extremely depressed for two months and started sleeping all day every day. This was extremely out of character for her. She attempted to kill herself and I found her and took her to the hospital.  She spent a week in a mental hospital. Though she is an amazing person, she doesn't save money and doesn't ever ask for help. Unbeknownst to my sister and me, we were broke.  We moved out of our childhood home into a family friend townhouse, 4 of us and 3 pets. She eventually did get better and got a job about 7 months after.       

I never went to therapy and just continued on with my life. I had extreme paranoia and general anxiety. I stopped caring about my appearance, stopped showering, started smoking a lot of weed, I knew I was depressed. I never felt like I was in my life, just coasting through. My senior year was spent with ups and downs.. I had high functioning depression. I spent that summer in my bed. I was always numb, and since I had nothing that excited me, I began to obsess over my body. I would spend hours every day taking pictures of my naked body comparing it to the day before. I had very very bad body dysmorphia and couldn't picture what I looked like if my life depended on it.  Fast forward to college, I went across the country to four-year in new England. I carried all the same issues with me but like I said I can function a normal life with depression.  I still went to class, made friends, joined a sorority,  partied (barely), and met boys. but, I was always numb and couldn't be myself. I got a nicotine addiction because that 5 seconds of head rush gave me something to feel. I play with my sleep ((stay up all night with caffeine (for the buzz) and sleep until 1 pm.    
Winter break (now ) one day I woke up cleaned my room and completely reorganized (real depressioners know how crazy this is ) and began to want to read self-help books.I feel alive and happy (not manic) It's like my depression just literally disappeared? I also quit nicotine btw :) this break.. my theory is that I've been in a dissociative episode triggered from the trauma. Just wondering if anyone has ever experienced something like this?",3.39754975124378,5.573606914179107,4.505671641791043,82.64822139303485,75.00746268656717,7.8248756218905475,26.838308457711438,8.660442795831766,2.1479062189054723,2190,84,410,45,48,715,268,536,0.11699999999999999,0.7909999999999999,0.092,-0.8717,6,0,2,0,1,0,82.0,5,0,0,5,15,34,1,1,25,0,34,17,9,5,9,83,72,33,1,9,11,5,4,5,2,1,8,1,6,2,15,34,0,2,9,2,7,13,10,13,1,5,40,8,76,22,65,28,9,81,1,7,2,0,37,28,0,8,43,275,91,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978495736213286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05119215499450365,0.15979489727734006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04897070919636772,0.0,0.0,0.04476023661432425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05984466188343756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05344920649410323,0.039022479223057134,0.0,0.05447139314732945,0.0,0.0,0.056615382594552136,0.0,0.21331612896078825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526677175867683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06711770012403083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477032877248425,0.0,0.27567680382658283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158090681981857,0.1618042439733559,0.06116833811225065,0.0,0.0,0.060346917026931714,0.0,0.0971025512496064,0.0,0.061463697640214886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018829687597186,0.09891446749913446,0.0,0.03344479203403744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239605186644808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814433603322967,0.0,0.0,0.06569706602117098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581477531702696,0.0676345464945909,0.06421149007333743,0.0,0.12608223976831992,0.07386382438367603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681422260117532,0.2540969748836976,0.0,0.07082225877207117,0.0,0.03518054558565459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22607571176867924,0.15637059155754468,0.0,0.05652573610865265,0.0,0.05375582911483882,0.0,0.06987909175382256,0.10884521493031647,0.0,0.06057181032176665,0.042729994260786684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451128550505324,0.0,0.0,0.2998907605653049,0.10219109209773164,0.06803699362661225,0.04705782314284145,0.0,0.14811515692955565,0.06182534028895919,0.0,0.060073016524247326,0.12544070384191694,0.06142337822800645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675539517216631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589475473546636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061307935245748936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435197997660562,0.0,0.06808701113258221,0.06403155114747339,0.0728622059486699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933560186834014,0.06089218992753807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05101105175660203,0.0,0.06678080077611721,0.0,0.0,0.052953230896663636,0.0,0.1921813748944038,0.0,0.0,0.0985625603151511,0.0,0.0,0.09061920009901976,0.06823064967142484,0.05112184516196944,0.1070375219311325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033265230166,0.0,0.04813073277819819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320584859985745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289365398047217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711221626838612,0.0,0.0,0.06253259911339974,0.06664106891877597,0.1540024688117333,0.0,0.0,0.1584553266078194,0.037757250218929735,0.0,0.05134835241346946,0.0,0.05755647876116425,0.1780254920286558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942069958911759,0.04660312038122505,0.0,0.0,0.04547387090492919,0.0,0.0,0.16489225614211786
mentalhealth,Mickistar4,2020/01/16,why? people say to not kill yourself and things will grt better. i dont want to wait for things to get better in like fucking 5 years. fuck life i want to die.,-0.9908823529411775,1.1193510882352946,0.5972941176470599,102.8918235294118,96.94117647058823,2.72,12.682352941176472,3.1291,-1.7642164705882353,123,2,29,0,5,39,27,34,0.22899999999999998,0.498,0.273,0.4434,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,2,0,6,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,5,8,1,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,2,3,6,7,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,1,2,0,2,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4324318507474469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25372370049011583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28651977165414305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4520214935432995,0.1277267118436285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704724319735353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726780496200049,0.11943684067977828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694863444792866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944142238929391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248331306023464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883922503577208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22059826923925807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743217706418772
mentalhealth,okrafromwunderworld,2020/01/16,"I keep having second thoughts about everything Anything I do or say, there is something in my brain that’s making me worry that if something doesn’t go right everyone will know and It’ll be the end of my life. I don’t know what to do",8.794897959183672,5.430983285714286,8.413979591836732,78.37566326530613,63.08163265306123,11.432653061224489,36.74489795918368,8.841846274778883,2.9299714285714287,187,6,40,2,2,60,40,49,0.066,0.934,0.0,-0.4404,0,0,2,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,9,2,1,1,0,8,15,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,6,0,4,11,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,1,28,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274647123384063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085688187532199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448202673960679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641248910384728,0.24842258009241355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709213009139514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24568896932621875,0.0,0.0,0.3038191998099765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952389899093517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18450812015676632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360555707521953,0.0,0.21981506497436487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255931468325832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21944139873718088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807112696595493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the_ugly_duckling420,2020/01/16,"dm? is there anyone who i can dm to just talk too and tell everything. i dont need a ""you can do it"", i want somebodies opinion on where tf my life is going. thank you",-0.7655405405405382,1.023847513513516,2.0499324324324317,96.84084459459463,87.37837837837839,5.8621621621621625,17.35810810810811,7.1686216300943375,-0.058940540540540536,126,3,32,2,4,44,30,37,0.0,0.888,0.11199999999999999,0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,0,0,5,10,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,2,10,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,0,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712000120267056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4545678276238112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485826355576417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204291925164444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273956262916585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875925138671547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117463505856742,0.3390058378967412,0.3570884317561059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287692712998779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,needsomehelp34uk,2020/01/16,"I'm in a confused place So, I'm dealing with lots of stuff at the minute...as most of you all are and I just dont know how to feel or what to do.

I'm not going into details because it's a long list of things but it boils down to how I should act and feel when it comes to my wife.

She has spent the last 3 years caring after our kids, always putting herself first and making sure they are raised the best way possible, some thing I admire in her and love her for. However, recently she has wanted to find herself and that has meant that she is distancing herself from me, not the kids, and wanting to do things on her own.

Now I dont have a problem with it in theory but we have always done things together.. since we first met, and I mean everything, so I am finding it hard to not see this as a rejection or not being good enough for her. Coupled with that is the fact she has started making friends, one in particular who is another man with who she flirts with constantly..even progressing beyond that whilst at the same time not showing any interest in me.

I also have problems making and maintaining friendships, I am casual acquaintances with many people but not really friends yet she believes that they are friends which causes issues when I say this to her.

In the past I have been upset and told her what she does and more importantly how she goes about it upsets me  ut she dismisses these and tells me I'm a ""drama queen"" and just manipulating her to control her and put her down...which is not the case.

At new years I had a bit of a mental break and now I am just trying to live by the motto ""what will be will be"" and think she will do what ever she wants to do and if she wants to leave she will. My issue is that it destroys me to think I'm not good enough and that I can be everything she wants outside the bedroom  but that she doesn't want me, is uninterested and rejects me inside the bedroom.

To top it off I am overweight, feel incredibly unattractive and ugly, a waste of time and effort and generally not good enough in any aspect of my life. I have also suffered a serious of injuries that has resulted in me having surgery last week which means another 8 weeks of not being independent. I don't have an positive reinforcement about how I look or if I am doing a good job but the issues are always highlighted to me.

I'm not letting her know how much its affecting me simply because she had issues which means that she cant listen to my feelings as she feels it's a lie and designed to keep her controlled, I have tried talking in multiple ways.",6.987897634280614,5.77573090909091,7.2973017408123795,78.16120629370631,64.86073500967117,10.507037643207855,32.84399642910281,9.565088089820216,2.747115816098794,2028,67,414,33,26,663,236,517,0.134,0.774,0.092,-0.9642,2,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,3,1,2,9,21,25,1,3,24,0,54,4,0,15,4,106,94,45,0,11,24,1,6,0,3,5,2,2,2,3,37,32,2,3,15,3,1,5,16,10,0,3,8,10,71,15,57,75,13,50,0,3,2,1,55,19,0,9,23,319,108,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880525116160742,0.18542365434133365,0.0,0.0,0.10102748692731583,0.15578056889532388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056222473036488,0.0,0.0,0.08368944275319813,0.0779535061399531,0.0,0.08109580003526902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573460437570399,0.07630722426763534,0.0,0.06398665147889303,0.0,0.0,0.16662529897881642,0.0,0.08219070281836484,0.0,0.0,0.07658062558595767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500395328032073,0.07601542776524611,0.17411395829899204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23025691863531916,0.0,0.049062012857613066,0.06719157181190365,0.0,0.0,0.1335182535651512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877939596877842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578328908373233,0.12636705214646873,0.0,0.0,0.17216834526715644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042215701267634416,0.2492140878246304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665413388725386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101209745185546,0.0737126004065065,0.06602451776415738,0.0,0.0,0.0816459778799081,0.12109813701876415,0.0,0.07865303469376221,0.0,0.0759575300113648,0.052466987805262114,0.0,0.0,0.06559163485307709,0.06573649880872909,0.06237747541663925,0.0,0.0,0.0631511952315926,0.06704165692322826,0.0,0.1487497752584901,0.07530944846408734,0.0,0.2427419143453553,0.0,0.0,0.07485794921125029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0546052075577209,0.0,0.0,0.0717412177898183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050334843855276035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090978277237034,0.05149721107298739,0.0,0.07760801371336658,0.0,0.0,0.08374085930798049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215409743763927,0.0,0.14934618682663822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047586420195977516,0.0,0.07334369497717101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05907136857641816,0.0,0.0,0.059192476040631076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06144615221973146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05257659512958539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850341691363833,0.0,0.0,0.07000912454959395,0.0,0.0,0.05970439149804645,0.06492501749542665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973964373533667,0.0951927500197125,0.0,0.0,0.08662789628192027,0.0,0.0,0.07097884210329015,0.0,0.10086407827737356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26287775515095385,0.11792187201053968,0.11916774954818678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566927739060674
mentalhealth,alonelyzelda,2020/01/16,"My brain started telling me that there are definitely worms/maggots in my food. Insomnia rampant. Depression since a young age. Anxiety now as a 25yo and no real memory capability. I can’t focus on anything usually and sometimes I’m gungho AF, yet sometimes almost calm. 

No matter how totally wanting to die inside I am on that particular day (it comes and goes
Rapidly/regularly, I’ve had suicidal thoughts since I was in middle school) virtually no one can tell. Also, 22 weeks PREGNANT. I capitalized it because I feel that may be an important detail. 

And NOWWWWW. 

NOW WHAT DOES MY BRAIN DO? 

I see sesame seeds in my Kim bop and my brain is so convinced they are probably maggots or worms. 

Of course I know they aren’t, but sometimes it makes me not want to eat it anymore. I have to force myself not to stare and over analyze. Also noticed it with canned chicken, meat typically. Really specific foods. Maybe only for a few weeks now, but I KNOW they are not worms/maggots and I’ll make myself eat it anyways. Despite the uneasiness, the thought and stomach feels will pass quickly afterward. What is this. Why is this suddenly starting to selectively appear. Maybe linked to my intense stress levels?

Should I mention my dad is like super schizo insane but undiagnosed with anything?",3.545639085894404,6.546047570212767,4.575508274231679,77.76074074074077,79.68085106382978,7.566587864460208,30.40583136327817,8.515128840125781,3.0056635145784094,1029,51,170,24,27,334,155,235,0.1,0.8170000000000001,0.083,-0.2669,1,0,0,1,0,0,33.0,0,0,3,1,11,6,0,1,6,0,20,9,4,3,1,37,36,17,2,3,7,1,2,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,13,11,4,0,7,0,0,3,8,2,0,1,4,4,24,4,17,28,2,26,0,1,2,0,7,8,0,4,16,112,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487987648269765,0.0,0.0,0.18349006142882968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776382279296142,0.0,0.11377573958932513,0.0,0.0,0.18881674928982195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993490614443519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38421098831257583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988248793356479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398772247693415,0.0,0.09881192474525473,0.0,0.11906577494875165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003960621597279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347833262606305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601616885503488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774503074442716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260990179316457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056048528243510996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315880475450006,0.0,0.23051208294048506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061444634241626,0.0,0.0,0.0777401966723824,0.08725304685680732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369226589655705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058144013274028,0.07349536387967077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610717902311063,0.09142046297301876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898023552852392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3403959820613139,0.0,0.1624049875863383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314163688741857,0.0,0.0,0.12548983133519506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005482978576196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18215665693025465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635267643064105,0.0,0.13533480203751835,0.0,0.18404992600191006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352089232731666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hamish_A,2020/01/16,"Mentally Healthy Schools on Instagram @Mentallyhealthyschools. Two well-being leaders, paving the way for all schools to become mentally healthy for students, educators and parents! Check out the link to their Instagram page. Share, like, comment or DM them for more. What do you believe are the core ingredients to making your learning communities mentally healthy? 

[MentallyHealthySchools on Instagram ](https://instagram.com/mentallyhealthyschools?igshid=1bvvgrxbkzfqs)",14.255714285714285,19.946353333333327,8.402857142857139,50.08500000000001,57.33333333333333,11.428571428571427,46.904761904761905,10.608840637214634,7.274476190476191,400,23,39,12,7,105,46,60,0.0,0.8009999999999999,0.19899999999999998,0.9091,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,1,7,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,2,9,3,3,4,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,1,24,5,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467321941627385,0.0,0.2516998339950706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10914392226877874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14912392175828046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6754161374421305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24806373219445085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4521936014836465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218233271004349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17732771681232498,0.0,0.0,0.20086704863751054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oooooh_shit,2020/01/16,"I am at my wit's end Today I broke down crying sitting on my bed because I couldn't get myself to shower but I didn't want to go back to bed and be miserable. I somehow managed to go to the shower and somehow shower while crying.

I am so fucked, I lost hope for things getting better. I have failed in my efforts to think positively, build habits, change some thinking patterns. I feel like I have done so much of what is recommended and always failed.

I just can't build a happy life, I cant seem to be productive or do anything good most days. When I am off work my days are so empty and I don't feel like I have it in me to turn this around. 

It's so hard and I don't believe that my life will end up being good in the end anyway. Most days I would rather wallow in my misery than do something because it's just so fucking hard.

​

I guess I have the very common ""my problems are unique and unfixable"" syndrome. I have just reached a point of learned helplessness. Even the thought of reading some self-help book or setting some goal for myself fills me with dread because I have done it so so so many times. Isn't the definition of insanity doing the same things over and over and expecting different results?",3.4714170040485826,4.895138894736847,4.289716599190282,87.46186234817816,73.00809716599191,6.819433198380567,26.765182186234817,7.273561745256523,1.246049392712551,965,34,198,10,19,310,133,247,0.23399999999999999,0.657,0.10800000000000001,-0.9896,4,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,7,19,17,2,2,8,0,29,4,0,1,0,40,46,21,0,7,7,0,4,2,0,2,2,0,5,0,9,10,0,0,7,2,0,3,7,10,0,0,5,4,32,7,28,35,7,30,0,6,0,2,0,13,2,12,14,143,41,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740918075664157,0.12684212204585815,0.14224930436452116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633622431321467,0.1042145124621099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001735114460763,0.0,0.21408899891542912,0.0,0.0,0.13189449995784586,0.0,0.10353631055917058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12384143811697568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571853599365585,0.2264957273897741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12231017228340862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396005160112205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31106003151645656,0.0,0.0,0.07732169602160475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838525669799672,0.16726547720388474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164532406853266,0.12232542520894953,0.0,0.1330638280263053,0.19638060915887864,0.0,0.0,0.12896257648434975,0.0,0.0,0.12462007346858167,0.2097382018183808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846758973102931,0.0,0.0,0.11627401566124015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16537586804770532,0.11438611478274152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779253647775835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868763514848928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605776677422981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066622110407044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201737627641113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170987505757518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657346430967482,0.12212648597753185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012395029967027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554831972631109,0.15002370371240648,0.0,0.09293817750904493,0.06826275027424161,0.0,0.11096589460128473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733535611794236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659259347064607,0.06904919132178736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852262216325856,0.0,0.0,0.08316108811023791,0.0,0.14224930436452116,0.0
mentalhealth,TheShyEyeWitness,2020/01/16,"Unable to get a job. I am currently 20 years old and am having a very hard time getting a job due to my lack of experience. 
The reason I haven’t had a job until the point is because since I was about 13 I have dealt with a lot of anxiety and depression. 
So during school I never looked at getting a job because I thought it would just cause unnecessary stress (my family are fortunately financially stable enough that they never needed me to get a job to pay rent or such). 
Although now, I was recently put on citalopram and can feel my social anxiety letting up quite a bit. I no longer feel as though people are staring at me in public, or constantly think about the dumb thing I might have said to a stranger I’m never going to see again.  
So I now feel as though I’m in a better place mentally and would manage to maintain a job. 
The problem is, I’ve been applying to jobs for over a year, cafes, supermarkets, just random stores in general, but not one place as asked me for an interview and I suspect it’s due to me not having any work experience. 
I even got my barista certificate, but am still having no luck with coffee shops. 
I will keep applying to jobs but constantly getting rejected is starting effective my mental health in a bad way and I’m not sure what else I can do to get a job and move forward with my life. I feel very stuck because of all of this. 
If anyone has been in the same position, I’d be very happy to know how you got through it. 
Thanks, also sorry that this is very rambly, I’m not much of a writer.",5.4741433691756285,5.317807496774197,6.504731182795703,79.10154121863802,67.58064516129032,9.85663082437276,30.448028673835125,9.586721724236666,2.571232974910394,1204,41,245,23,18,404,172,310,0.126,0.8059999999999999,0.068,-0.8719,11,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,1,4,16,11,1,1,21,0,30,2,0,4,5,51,59,24,0,6,12,0,5,0,0,4,2,1,1,0,9,10,0,1,10,1,4,4,10,6,0,1,10,9,27,5,39,43,7,37,0,2,3,0,7,14,1,7,20,170,36,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058923616048192025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05010641189522278,0.0,0.11273333840328655,0.0,0.0,0.0515202963573587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888289582128651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061521546062618664,0.13474792670292018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516590416600078,0.0804418615789827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569189981902799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592485299923683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634623572452239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061552010170219815,0.0,0.0,0.07613339272157116,0.0,0.04866638772121323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14415062921265148,0.06946100567496732,0.0,0.14902370484295258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309754006062265,0.0,0.04187528326194243,0.0,0.11786074732890507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843605514774901,0.06600476434706863,0.0,0.0,0.07832071622260378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6580637858376668,0.06549211076891269,0.0,0.0,0.04049380145605504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534502541929773,0.05204390570980902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187447735800668,0.0,0.0,0.06264195806882432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850862278734622,0.07816515348954911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831250100641829,0.054164883334765324,0.05463440592743984,0.17048472834894113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731705759329448,0.0,0.0499289548934085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05108194904095275,0.0,0.15396439997719585,0.0,0.06965348021320376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050389924009992,0.0,0.0740709462316945,0.0,0.07837007256826753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575755706188264,0.07275226776822989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008863018189156,0.0,0.0,0.07457030406903058,0.058715161107071735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060950664143778935,0.0,0.0,0.07510970772987267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248117271236567,0.052152629185099005,0.0,0.058842687445418734,0.0,0.08440269300355076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944458657334847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783665565637001,0.0,0.0,0.048951169119911306,0.047212568450389125,0.1447847436550026,0.058495423839310765,0.042964674117266594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431820742021241,0.0,0.0584854881589484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05364150761548931,0.0,0.0,0.10468341915728244,0.0,0.0,0.09489782166116537
mentalhealth,sunflowersandroses88,2020/01/16,"How to deal with regrets about life decisions - wishful thinking? From 18-25 I was very depressed and socially anxious, having emerged into adulthood from a highly controlled, abusive family environment. I commuted to university and barely spoke to anyone and got a poor grade in my degree. I struggled to find jobs after as a result of not really having developed in confidence or socially.

I'm not in a good place right now - in a low paying job and struggling hugely with self esteem and I can't help thinking I wish I had done things different. 

One major regret is not having lived out at university - I did actually have that option but I had been so brow beaten I didn't choose it and I think internally I thought I wouldn't be able to cope socially.

I really really regret it as I now think it would have given me space from the toxicity at home and it would have pushed me to socialise and I might be further along in my development than I am now at 31. The guy I'm seeing said that university helped him to develop and he left home at 19 and never went back - I just so wish I had done this too.

How do I stop myself from ruminating about this and envisioning how everything would be better if I have just made better decisions at the time?  

I don't live at home anymore but it all feels too late - like I've missed key parts of my social development.

TLDR: how to stop ruminating and regretting about the past?",4.501072297532153,6.159118989051097,5.992732012513034,75.33692214111923,70.78832116788321,9.306638859923533,27.64615919360445,9.725611199111238,2.7188976711852617,1129,40,206,28,21,383,153,274,0.165,0.787,0.048,-0.9762,3,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,4,18,14,1,2,9,0,29,1,0,7,2,60,48,24,0,12,9,0,1,1,0,5,1,2,3,2,10,17,0,3,10,0,2,2,8,10,0,1,16,4,28,4,37,24,3,34,0,7,1,0,13,21,0,4,12,150,38,5,0.09597857551866944,0.11371891745681065,0.0936612446302548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842847112072583,0.09518495670193736,0.0671104516156888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380160016995459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697705008601086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764813366811522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894969695463966,0.08266620645544559,0.0,0.0,0.10027718341853382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964388116105344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862593549419046,0.0,0.09048005912452722,0.0,0.048529651615761706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772267922556122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050227547238753,0.07676283465201436,0.0,0.0,0.09503387949363007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286648320572442,0.10140663462493232,0.2888230105798146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904878529302511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826801371754896,0.0,0.10428100313055616,0.0,0.06779250631252906,0.04689028393331101,0.0,0.16950168118400585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908172488206354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101818101256788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740245943314939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503756671650837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393544424281298,0.09162241053476018,0.0,0.0,0.10027718341853382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844589994474346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196517907491663,0.09129760419089487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648249830031692,0.0,0.10012658641550452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3913522834970405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16048477353946053,0.0,0.20067529263007186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376390081234437,0.24599678298936495,0.0,0.07619626805090317,0.05596587922419472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919237649248051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897310107400756,0.0,0.0,0.33111187547799625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20454127886580664,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,somedudewithascalpel,2020/01/16,"What's wrong with me? For some context I live in a Christian family, I'm diagnosed with depression and anxiety but nothing else. My mom has talked to me about demons and demon possession since i was very young (eg a story of someone throwing themselves into a burning wood stove and burning to death while possessed) basically fear mongering that demons are bad, typical Christian stuff..... Understandable! Except that when I was a kid I'd be terrified whenever i was alone or trying to sleep that a demon was gonna harm me or possess me. I'm still afraid of something like that happening even though I'm not religious at this point. I don't know how to fix this but it seriously disrupts my sleep, I haven't been afraid of the dark since i was 8 but the idea of sleep paralysis terrifies me because it can make you see demons on your chest or whatever else so I just lay in bed awake terrified that something is watching me until i pass out after an hour or three. I've done this for years unless I'm dead tired, sometimes it keeps me up until it's light outside. Do I have PTSD from being so terrified when i was younger or something?",4.849055429864254,6.2416759954751155,5.3878252262443445,81.03612697963803,69.58823529411765,8.96391402714932,31.00707013574661,9.354420925462401,2.7831830316742088,909,38,172,19,16,292,138,221,0.262,0.725,0.013000000000000001,-0.9964,0,1,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,0,10,9,0,3,8,0,18,6,4,2,0,26,29,21,2,0,12,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,2,1,14,7,0,1,3,0,0,2,3,8,0,1,8,3,22,1,26,18,1,20,7,1,2,0,5,8,0,6,11,112,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14766407695001965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906902334826406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904366603463302,0.0869120289930875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279911909205747,0.1447100116369972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14590310875258022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238205227645155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09416904446938533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344064525554057,0.1604358344999429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607806827678034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404070614737218,0.0,0.0,0.1609491398303372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267266748196182,0.0,0.0,0.07835515986709532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696546485907814,0.0,0.12589580450408788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516951700684406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698141043285114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368039790319516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13477888914252698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16666184025572536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361333512141596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23587802879777825,0.0,0.4280320871279917,0.0,0.12080282378103853,0.3292822087537358,0.14100972410421728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386009749662265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321357376960444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459589956722906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007862101704185,0.0,0.0,0.16386829563997632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096798656633099,0.0,0.0,0.14842497527878096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763880900140852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588272125355174,0.0,0.0918132370872758
mentalhealth,Ghostboy_jxel,2020/01/16,"My story and thoughts pt.1 I was trying to get some sleep for 3 hours, but instead i found myself thinking what i would write to my suicide note . I haven't tried seeking help at all or talking about my problems that much, but now i realized, that it's the only thing left to do.

I turned 21 recently and i feel like my life has nothing left to offer.

My world is getting darker everysingle day for unknown reason.

I dont live my life for my own sake, but for my closest friends which i consider my family. I made a promise to one of my friends, that i wouldn't consider suicide as an option a while back, but if nothing changes soon there is no doubt that i would break it eventually.

I think i've been depressed since 2014, but the past year it has made my life a living hell.

I can't get out of bed, answer phone, brush my teeth or get a shower and if i manage to do one of those things, i can say it was a good one.

In 2015 i got diagnosed with ankylosing spondylitis. I was unable to move out of bed for several months, and even moving my hand made my whole body crumble from pain

( I dont remember much from this year or from the hospitalization when the ankylosing spondylitis hit me )

I didn't think alot of it back then but it must have had an insane impact on my mental health without me even realizing it.

I found happiness again somehow for a solid 8 months back in 2018 when i started lifting and going to gym almost everyday. I finally had found something to do with my life that i actually enjoyed alot. I was happy that i was making alot of progress and at the end of december 2018 i injured my shoulder, and to this day im unable to go back to gym and get back into lifting because my shoulder hurts so bad that i can't lift even a coffee cup without getting pain flowing into my arm.

After my shoulder injury, i was in a dark place. I was still finishing studies and taking a final mandatory classes to get out of the miserable school i was in. For somereason i asked if i could swap seats to sit next to a girl who was sitting alone by the time. She was really good at this subject, and would teach me, since i was terrible at it. I ended up asking her out and the next thing i know, we are hanging out everyday. Me being me , i got my feelings involved more than i should after like 1 to 2 months of doing things together, but not "" dating "" , we were just randomly having sex and chilling at our places binge watching shows.

But for me, all the good things come to an end quickly for some odd reason.

This was my 2nd time where i found something good in my life to lose it after being in really REALLY dark place.

I realized that nothing good ever lasts longer than a while for me.

I dont know how many times i can fall down and get up.

Im getting more and more tired.

I recently started "" losing time "" where i might say something and forget what i said after 1 minute and say it again.

Everyday is the same and many days are all blending into one day

I can't sleep or i sleep too much.

I haven't been able to cry in years and i miss it more than anything in this world, I WISH I COULD CRY!!!

In the beginning of 2018 i lost the ability to feel any emotions ( other than anger and irritation ) at all for many months, and i thought wow , this is good since im not sad anymore, but the days went by and i realized feeling nothing was worse than being sad. I was lost, but later this year i found my emotions again, to find them only being 10 times stronger.

feeling sadness 10x the normal amount isn't really maintainable, but when it gets to that point, my emotions just randomly shut off.

I also feel like with depression and anxiety im losing my intelligence day by day.

It gets harder to think and speak. My thoughts are slow and i can't focus at anything, also remembering even the most basic stuff is getting challenging.

When meeting new people, you get asked THE QUESTION "" What are your future plans? ""

You need to lie everytime to everysingle new person you talk to. In what world would you just say, that you see yourself dead in 2 years ? No, you will just make something up and tell them what they want to hear. Its getting really troublesome and boring.

I started cutting myself to feel better few months ago, it has been the only thing beside music to keep me going for now.

Im going to try and be brave and get help before it's too late for the sake of people i care about , for the first time in my life.

I feel like nothing is fixable, but hey you can't know before you try!",5.051054798859674,5.3667198348115335,5.709967532467536,82.81352272727275,68.50110864745011,8.571460247070004,29.300047513462147,8.418075326091056,1.9704978777320243,3529,119,714,48,56,1148,362,902,0.158,0.72,0.122,-0.9918,1,1,4,0,1,3,89.0,3,9,3,10,39,44,3,2,36,0,69,23,10,8,6,145,141,59,3,17,27,0,9,4,2,9,12,7,3,2,49,42,0,1,34,3,0,11,19,23,0,5,38,19,116,21,111,86,22,137,1,13,2,1,44,46,1,21,81,495,165,5,0.03991596041424972,0.0,0.0389522194177949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03538309051599546,0.0,0.039970068506335256,0.04134089696535512,0.0,0.06384155824407241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027144221858295986,0.0,0.030535600462112907,0.0,0.039585906992415806,0.0,0.0,0.06569486872136729,0.0,0.11194810418623233,0.0,0.0,0.15346454846681765,0.033328159655118164,0.024332398981976696,0.0,0.06793108472625098,0.0,0.0,0.0353024232502872,0.0,0.04433763361108877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040696981901636266,0.0,0.04222579345080296,0.03438406549619757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637392927990371,0.0,0.08769161641189717,0.1801974461152323,0.0,0.06875911643072706,0.04051385959609755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034362498081898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470024877391615,0.1060610797268648,0.0,0.0,0.10545646158889384,0.03610627142654982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03762921504905109,0.0,0.16146167140688802,0.08554791028657803,0.0,0.08745196711415902,0.036482464680029775,0.03395249553728298,0.0,0.21882895160111485,0.061677944000456786,0.0,0.3128166276890185,0.0,0.09074064066834732,0.20087768277334767,0.06384887987130816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498256419047351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04242879936588894,0.04498818839049857,0.0,0.053509653746674456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03930918055010835,0.0,0.04273086118498392,0.0,0.21558043430293286,0.0,0.0,0.03547913964378187,0.0,0.0,0.06581030385337233,0.032536835249881775,0.045026941964131366,0.0,0.08673761556521246,0.0,0.1691629397746576,0.07800368810145138,0.0,0.07049304868015557,0.0,0.0,0.1339672487888801,0.08714597200925668,0.0,0.0,0.11330834061452855,0.05328842705804796,0.12140555640698884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040225899763479685,0.04234452613259998,0.0,0.0,0.15930269391089238,0.084848697848944,0.08802847108122899,0.02959717887386825,0.0,0.07710216660035048,0.08490215347450478,0.0,0.03910916624510636,0.19150220278439087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819235123948262,0.09107365973130198,0.08494679233044512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03810430080046602,0.05534540212622927,0.034853077003356735,0.1251110488613598,0.0,0.03773348457006345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03819418334823292,0.0,0.0,0.04471501086064721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785593173974732,0.08208051059933583,0.07882439082345344,0.0,0.0904340039957936,0.0,0.037969219016912116,0.12697109532300388,0.0,0.04039708295064216,0.03180785251334072,0.0,0.0,0.04509367364168307,0.0,0.09905668480446272,0.0,0.11983436173046727,0.0,0.0,0.12291702577709833,0.0,0.0,0.08475816668258013,0.0,0.03187693754836788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045694224864456484,0.08732316414131333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030011834628949845,0.06416587398253286,0.0348883087692268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15911034271530314,0.10230614279044256,0.0,0.0950664417386086,0.1396519050791976,0.04587752462119535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084012678752793,0.04341710277412902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023543467639198082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03700249520490445,0.0,0.04456474432138387,0.045901384563672126,0.07695512286993526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04067777377802118,0.11342061213372112,0.0,0.0,0.12852284905304062
mentalhealth,crazziecazzie,2020/01/16,"I travelled on my own to Melbourne city and I am in a hotel room and not coping! XI XI I can't stop crying, I feel so overwhelmed by how beautful everyone is here and how I'm a 26 year old chubby failure who is invisible and meaningless to everyone. I have anxiety and a foggy brain and I forgot to bring proper pajamas for the hot weather and I hate myself too much to walk out of this hotel room and get food. I'm just so miserable and a bit scared because I'm so vulnerable here in a city all alone surrounded by perfect people. I want to go home. X'(",1.5052272727272715,3.4429469051724158,4.188244514106581,83.81757053291534,79.94827586206897,7.321630094043888,25.200626959247646,8.296473431620573,1.7813896551724142,435,17,89,9,11,154,76,116,0.19399999999999998,0.715,0.091,-0.9255,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,9,6,1,3,6,0,5,2,1,2,2,20,15,14,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,10,1,2,1,3,0,4,2,4,0,0,1,3,10,2,13,14,4,14,0,2,1,0,1,7,0,0,3,58,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427236252081911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792827970879343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286211776843946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25585762208599705,0.0,0.0,0.2616204052516976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574306388864651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4478771465616512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184981613028874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28338594188666993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244208757203864,0.0,0.1331907316572775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313794488962244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350796166616663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17227968098415267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459187059350073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624739377805624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346326774375541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959333103409284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382300877541882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15091850508411525
mentalhealth,Prince_Ragefuel,2020/01/16,"I think im dissociating I need help. I dont know what to do anymore.  I think I have a dissociative disorder. 

Im going to split this into 2 sections to make it easier. (1). A bit of background / growing up experiences and (2). how i feel

Please forgive my spelling or grammar or whatever im typing this on my phone at like 1:30 am

(1). Im just putting this here for background purposes weather it will give some sort of insight on how im feeling or not , i dont know.
growing up i didnt have the worst childhood or the most difficult but it still messed me up and i think this stems from that. 

Im a male in my early 20s now but At a young age i was diagnosed with pretty severe ADHD and later on really bad anxiety and depression. Growing up my parents were decent enough and i had a few friends like every kid but my mother and fathers work had us move later down the road.  I think i was like 6 the first time we moved. New school , new people , no family except my parents and my younger brother. Started making friends again then within the next year and a half we moved again. This kept up for a long time. we would move, settle down, id make a friend or 2 then wed move within 1-2 years, each move a couple hours away from where we lived before. In total we had moved 11-12 times from me being age 6-18. After about the 5th move i just kind of gave up trying to meet new people and make friends cause what was the point if i was probably just going to move again. I didnt have a phone or any real way to keep in contact with old friends except like one or 2 of them. So for a long time i would be that new quiet kid in the back of the class that wouldn’t talk to anyone and was only around for the grade. I became shy, isolated, and basicly antisocial even though the only thing i wanted was a friend that wouldnt be gone in a year. When i got to high school i was at a new school again and i got bullied alot and had a couple mental breakdowns that almost led to suicide and to top it all off my mother and father had started to fight alot and eventually got a divorce because my mother wanted to be a party animal and made dumb decisions. I moved again at the end of my sophomore year back to my home town where i finished off high school. My junior and senior years were actually ok (ok as in i didnt get bullied and i did actually talk to some people on ocassion) but when high school was over i fell out of contact with all of them. And i guess over the years i really fell behind in the social department because i even now have a kinda hard time communicating with people (little to no eye contact, slightly awkward, difficulty conveying emotions and feelings) i still talk to those 2 friends and they are my best friends but besides them no one else really knows who i am. I haven’t been in a relationship scene early middle school and i want nothing more than just to be loved, understood and feel alive again.

(2). I feel empty. I space out often and stare off into the distance with a blank mind alot. I feel disconnected from everything around me like everything is fake. Like how a movie or a video game feels looking at a tv screen and it doesnt feel 3d or have any depth just like a picture, thats how i feel when i look around.  I dont take in my surroundings fully. a bright and lively room feels the same as standing outside at night in the quiet.  My mind feels foggy like it is always on autopilot weather it be at work, talking to someone, or at home alone.  Its difficult to explain like my mind and body are separate sorta like if you were to sit on someones shoulders and they did everything you would do but you yourself aren’t actually doing it if that makes sense.  Ive felt like this for as long as i can remember.  I dont think its depression but i could be wrong. Ill still smile and feel emotions on rare occasion but not very often or for very long. And i know something is wrong because sometimes i get these moments of clarity where i look around and feel like im seeing everything and feeling the size and scale of the room but i loose my focus and it fades away.   

I don’t exactly get the best sleep at night (i say as i type this at 2:30 am) so i feel like that is a factor of some sort.  I hang out with some people now on occasion but it doesn’t make me feel any different. Even when i talk to by best buddies i feel the same.  I dont have any real motivation or feeling to push onward and it feels like im only doing it cause i have to.   I still dont drive cause im terrified that because of this im going to space out or feel disconnected while driving and hurt myself or even worse, someone else.   Id prefer to not see a therapist or psychologist as i have bad experiences with them not caring or not listening to me. I know they are not all like that but it has a sort of negative association connected to them for me because of past experiences unfortunately. If i really have to ill try again but id like to know if anyone has some sort of advice or just an opinion or thoughts on how i should go about this. Im at a loss and i just want help.",2.7075270453008784,4.256482244252878,4.198776650890242,86.83565314401623,75.21647509578544,7.173477574938022,24.35131845841785,7.888601617507742,1.197057687626775,3989,126,843,59,85,1327,377,1044,0.12300000000000001,0.73,0.14800000000000002,0.9653,4,1,1,0,2,3,83.0,6,3,8,9,52,50,2,1,54,2,75,8,4,17,5,214,149,94,1,18,50,8,22,16,8,7,3,4,4,3,40,61,0,2,41,3,0,27,26,16,0,4,32,35,104,34,133,102,25,172,0,4,9,1,63,76,1,43,82,561,144,15,0.0,0.0,0.09457137898172688,0.0,0.03882282114401475,0.03156684348657286,0.0,0.0,0.03234753203742869,0.033456935127116554,0.0,0.0,0.0268793017164182,0.0,0.0,0.08787061108520551,0.0,0.02471227473812713,0.0,0.03203663247324389,0.045175055975656665,0.0,0.0,0.1150287191387752,0.0,0.0,0.0607008592616707,0.04967916827416082,0.05394455163476124,0.09846030855466688,0.0,0.02748810574557057,0.0,0.10170235490980932,0.0,0.035267320420775544,0.035882175770380435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03293581860339263,0.09955452665229067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025791909957986487,0.0714869537175384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05564633248641291,0.03278761884125706,0.0,0.03375053560922876,0.037022887787022125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271584750772377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053971263782466784,0.07267472512126164,0.028611527763958783,0.03337840153283965,0.0,0.08534526952987152,0.0,0.027217296464782152,0.0,0.11613008388736895,0.09479777685727844,0.030453093648051814,0.0,0.3266748584520981,0.0692334006956117,0.031016658885120407,0.0,0.0,0.027477547029193573,0.0,0.0,0.19966233175119835,0.0,0.050632116802137035,0.03098869353656062,0.07343584564161894,0.0,0.07750876209520575,0.0,0.035586214528481666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028937808347961527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04330503558201107,0.10239203324955742,0.06480657560722176,0.0,0.03181267945558205,0.0,0.03458182467085591,0.0,0.38382944000042296,0.0,0.0,0.02871305076962117,0.0,0.033639376977110835,0.10651975299729416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525116312472031,0.032376836672442795,0.05704959325340984,0.11435118296232925,0.08138102386070263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029155388999466236,0.030566582404492695,0.12937799452691762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03255457470950577,0.0,0.09785271406308303,0.0,0.0,0.3433376617265237,0.0,0.023952815884921833,0.0,0.15599577993372046,0.03435539682810314,0.06062974839683812,0.0,0.03099631234719752,0.0,0.03389734387806241,0.0,0.04377970414748214,0.07370535593295838,0.0,0.0,0.07173896673265373,0.0,0.0308375776416678,0.11197673880136176,0.0,0.0,0.0354598088410488,0.030537478333830876,0.0,0.0,0.03286451972020801,0.034828898292501645,0.0,0.0,0.03247418375640534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353746273958743,0.08277841900563658,0.0,0.0,0.0346821303101541,0.036593843228755335,0.0,0.0,0.025689232763869845,0.0,0.19615867329686096,0.05148380108750697,0.0,0.0,0.03649403434418677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032327072065994486,0.03292959756555799,0.08211256905325802,0.024868999340343454,0.03194922752433711,0.0,0.04572951068395791,0.0,0.1031912425606684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035335051392557215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0242883942520162,0.12982262364840644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037507135073095256,0.021461171241399284,0.10349466973690148,0.0317382631772344,0.02564556333227681,0.0941828607099103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438642416254266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03885742500036828,0.0,0.0,0.05330794168067775,0.07621433759718638,0.02564120733135813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0470350188271428,0.0,0.03292027358640275,0.06884295590059096,0.07063814300865788,0.0,0.12481530703283822
mentalhealth,nana411411,2020/01/16,"I want people to feel sorry for me I want people to feel sorry for me. But i know that they can’t help. I know that it’s pathetic. I know that they don’t care or can’t care. 

I can’t be better. I can’t 

Just make it stop.",-2.8033423180592965,-1.1814802830188658,0.7213477088948785,103.37641509433963,97.1132075471698,3.7832884097035038,9.45822102425876,5.288315135182226,-1.899057142857143,167,1,47,1,7,60,26,53,0.16,0.565,0.275,0.7269,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,12,16,2,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,11,3,4,15,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,29,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20506150288191666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4727938483055722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344709650792406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554110030661249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3822729028432441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547684823399171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214853342260653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5190970171387596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19384550722850924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735143037018826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SaraAliMahran,2020/01/16,"Support Lilac Hello,
I have been volunteered as an Arabic writer for Lilac since June. Lilac is an non-profit organization which aims to spread awareness about mental health in Egypt. Most of our content is in English actually which I try so hard to change to make a little bit of balance between posts in Arabic and English.
We talk about mental health issues by short stories, drawings, research, articles and poems.
You can submit a “Warrior story” in which you can talk about what heavens your heart anonymously as we believe you are a warrior for just trying to let it out of your body.
I want you to support Lilac to be able to talk to as many people as possible around the world.
If you want to, you can “Like” our page on Facebook which we post our contents, our page name is Lilac.
Thanks all in advance.
I hope we all will be able to go through our mental health problems soon.❤️",5.90004303388919,6.801769224852072,5.6231199569661126,82.11191500806886,66.81065088757396,7.565572888649813,30.748251748251747,7.348242739294969,1.8801313609467456,705,26,129,6,11,218,102,169,0.026000000000000002,0.863,0.11,0.9088,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,9,8,0,1,6,7,0,0,6,0,13,5,2,1,2,19,21,8,0,5,2,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,21,6,33,16,6,16,1,0,0,0,22,11,0,3,2,87,27,1,0.2575460007054204,0.0,0.12566387261562353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463527177540447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14508307423926148,0.0,0.0,0.14058676447047588,0.14303777359697006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622475968265949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318466367540287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535531472104887,0.0,0.0,0.4106390330338781,0.0,0.15259662543578453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790064522529976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440555609240265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167911749834948,0.0,0.06291198339684058,0.1290643762344473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595697767416936,0.13055561063603194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3893186898678326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927498441171823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451722093988373,0.2466578763856469,0.0,0.0,0.12321837016397205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652235659523003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922601495423215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105085795468505,0.0,0.1185568775265466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17485682871549116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519073040028448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SoundlessFOB,2020/01/16,"Are these symptoms of ADHD or something else?? Wondering if these are symptoms of ADHD, something else or just nothing. Of course I'm not expecting someone with professional advice here I'm just curious

-I get distracted fairly easily

-If I find something like a game I really like I can play it for 8 hours straight without moving from my seat and the next day be completely bored of it

-My room is a complete mess

-Cannot manage time
 
-Very forgetful. Gets me in trouble.

-Can be moody

-Can be almost completely blank and emotionless

-Restless

-No motivation 

-Tired almost always. Probably because my sleep schedule is out of wack

-Too many thoughts happening at the same time don't know what to focus on

-Zone out and just straight up stare at something for a couple minutes without knowing why. Usually I'm daydreaming while this is happening 

-Small tasks feel big

-Overlook things because I rush everything

-Can't follow directions

-BORED. All the time

-Procrastinate everything. Even things I like doing. I will procrastinate something I want to do and not know why I'm not just doing it

-Misplace everything 

-I always think a task will be quick and always takes me way longer than I think it will

-Hate social gatherings where you need to sit still the whole time

-Sress easily

-Kinda got a short temper 

-And of course always fidgeting",4.138037408511792,7.471762042016808,4.16217674166441,78.89620086744377,81.94117647058823,7.440715641095147,27.84548658172947,8.360895534625662,2.830093087557604,1098,48,168,26,31,338,150,238,0.115,0.787,0.099,-0.7112,0,0,5,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,0,1,10,13,2,2,9,0,21,4,1,1,1,41,43,11,0,5,13,0,1,3,0,3,3,0,1,0,10,9,0,0,10,2,0,3,9,9,0,0,2,2,16,4,23,34,3,31,0,0,1,0,4,14,0,8,15,107,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22855428313969275,0.09291876622377848,0.0,0.0,0.190433533120314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.316482901245243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159293661629955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990934682501953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521291974212496,0.0,0.061323809835963465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886742823488342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280464145175492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563765392206879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04807928422841482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690859067271751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935897511268907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605045621663444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817177911638104,0.0,0.0,0.0938795856896092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936423981239232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15677342004721245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936539087260955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640417572028924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106335763141952,0.0,0.07050645087650143,0.0,0.0,0.1011270286734086,0.0,0.0,0.09123937596147512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252080667011504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06091572449451922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515654149193158,0.09693010893973866,0.08056764382263865,0.36601644014669776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593729594720522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19766541120223285,0.0714942445358536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634431151257036,0.12185693544913075,0.0,0.07548914749624988,0.22178600708843849,0.10928951876882163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472585507836443,0.07845745129703306,0.05608528946761298,0.07547632536434414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17160402571139316,0.10616221126040164,0.0,0.1833226272492736,0.10311873902162114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ShOtErSaN,2020/01/16,"I dont know if I have a condition For the last few weeks I've been seeing the same people on the route to the gym, at first I thought it was just people getting up early to commute to work, however when I leave the gym the same people I see are still in that spot waiting for the bus. I decided to go to the gym early one morning I got up at 3 and left at 3:30. 

Through my car window I saw the same 5 people just staring at me I dont know if Im going crazy but something came over me and I just wanted to beat the shit out of them. I've never been aggressive but It pissed me of seeing them just staring at me. Now its just a daily occurrence, it only stops on the weekends and I dont know why.",2.754999999999999,2.857422551948055,4.6679480519480565,89.02477922077922,73.48051948051949,7.458701298701298,25.14025974025973,7.1686216300943375,0.8947501298701299,539,15,127,5,10,186,85,154,0.073,0.878,0.05,-0.3257,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,3,8,3,3,0,13,0,8,2,2,0,1,26,23,8,0,3,9,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,2,5,4,0,4,4,3,0,2,7,6,18,0,23,16,4,28,0,0,6,0,2,13,2,2,11,89,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17157649692967364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5274472406011316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276021627994124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837632672961307,0.0,0.1705132689049462,0.0,0.11998021110042335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620412829100232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24733195523008145,0.1222817493333898,0.0,0.1588435777710232,0.16299107277742664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570034502735473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165363250951516,0.11409270287668775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160043555299262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35862613723784603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398761472590508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548840582871045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980168497856,0.12541874655199978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909466823698005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848237347563344,0.0,0.12033249426964855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536465298699946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921226198390108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SugarTrap420,2020/01/16,"I'm not able to brush things off anymore. Hey, I'm a 24 year old female from Atlanta, Georgia. 

Anywho, I've lost something about myself and I dont know what it is. I cant get over things anymore. Every slight inconvenience literally makes me cry or makes me upset in some type of way. I'm constantly feeling overwhelmed. I've gotten to the point where I'm having panic attacks constantly because of my anxiety and just crazy shit my brain is coming up with. I'll be having a great day and my brain says,""hey remember that one time.."" and then I'm an absolute mess. What do I do? What's happening to me.",1.7913668150031796,4.199644652892562,3.4482644628099166,86.91827082008898,81.80991735537191,6.367705022250477,24.183725365543552,7.61054688173877,1.3496759059122696,477,18,94,8,13,158,83,121,0.214,0.732,0.054000000000000006,-0.9590000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,3,8,2,3,4,0,9,3,3,2,0,15,23,6,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,7,0,1,2,2,10,1,12,20,1,15,0,2,0,0,1,6,1,2,7,53,17,1,0.16439567685018705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257622428196381,0.0,0.3260726739985205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18702381534756807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002140787423679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3670398885588384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161231901840013,0.0,0.3553066480817848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18058093159364835,0.10602161145335197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926705089133056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851044807368562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312339375285947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588995597288371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812468140950536,0.0,0.0,0.1453745541135601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034756467849167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17945730109646532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21947078170170292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17250560852484026,0.0,0.11139876522724426,0.0,0.0,0.1928829057563703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155407052002115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18622825484932595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16874979985736133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655982368536595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21843436571142946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586044120635706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13048963629478233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058654259675349
mentalhealth,athenaoof,2020/01/16,"do you agree that nurture > nature when it comes to your mental illness? for a lack of a better word, me and my sister are losers. she games all the time and i have an eating disorder.

so i can’t help but put two and two together to think that its bc of our fucked up relationship with our parents/ how we were brought up. my dad is the typical traditional asian dad stereotype and doesn’t understand the concept of mental illness. my mom is high-key narcissistic and lacks any ounce of empathy. 

i really don’t know about how healthy parent-child relationships are supposed to be but i just know that i don’t feel comfortable being vulnerable around them and its not ok, which has led me to depression and an eating disorder.

am i just delusional or right to a certain extent?",5.6008,6.608492813333335,6.229333333333333,77.11800000000002,67.53333333333333,10.0,31.0,10.125756701596842,3.0926,622,24,117,15,10,203,102,150,0.2,0.693,0.107,-0.9498,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,3,2,1,2,8,8,1,0,8,1,15,5,0,3,2,30,23,14,0,2,6,5,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,11,2,0,5,1,0,4,5,3,0,2,2,1,18,5,15,19,4,10,0,2,0,1,16,4,1,1,2,85,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802993870074937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141867598187005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14049835871610605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684343236022892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682549405738312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641336049686463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32510594945767674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032415957466332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686309030536054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648020496459447,0.16784383217985308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17461010372107752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32018611609623804,0.0,0.0,0.18605438011119466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3527894518028914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15969772087550674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176949289965154,0.0,0.0,0.34111140142492263,0.0,0.13566518415807347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179078251034668,0.0,0.0,0.09263227869702056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31036538619206666,0.16537838970774507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,A_Curious_Coder,2020/01/16,"Reacting emotionally when you don't feel emotions I'm trying to understand what it wrong with me.
During intense situations I'll react in the way I assume it is normal for people to act, while in reality I dont care.
I'm not a sociopath: every now and again, it's like a bubble will pop and I'll just cry and cry and cry about everything and anything until the pressure is gone.
I assume it's just a lot of anxiety mixed with a particularly stressful childhood where we weren't supposed to have negative emotions. How can I react like a normal human being?",5.609688311688314,6.263398618181821,7.273116883116888,70.9068181818182,67.36363636363636,9.558441558441556,32.077922077922075,9.606745405546679,3.1392467532467534,448,18,78,9,7,156,73,110,0.233,0.711,0.055999999999999994,-0.9634,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,1,0,0,8,6,0,2,7,0,9,0,0,4,0,22,15,9,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,0,4,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,2,1,7,3,11,11,1,12,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,8,55,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150485015657665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130703917054942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16193821680102852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.523403333365053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18614809015991055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5359885934987697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338214941224431,0.0,0.14274655602257624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030944165755753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15519305811894574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13503195836246365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112402122405477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101130269330497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17853206678876465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18193972983432916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783544134256526,0.0,0.0,0.16534808717555927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260722085540597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365615008244842,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dylanstacey05,2020/01/16,"In 6th grade I tested to have the intelligence levels of a junior and freshman in science and English, yet I feel incredibly stupid and it’s been eating at me for quite some time. So after doing extremely well in the beginning of 6th grade, I suffered a spout of depression and missed half a year of school. I still somehow passed and made it to seventh grade, but since then I just feel incredibly dumb. I perform very well in most of my classes without studying in 8th grade, but I just have this nagging feeling of being stupid. Sometimes I take way to long to figure stuff out, or I just freeze up and answer incorrectly to a question that’s very basic. It doesn’t seem very serious but it seems somewhat out of character for me, but maybe it’s just me focusing on my academic achievements far to much. I had moments even before my hiatus from school where I just came off as kinda slow. I know iq isn’t raisable, but I just want suggestions on how to overcome my self loathing on my own intelligence.",10.166237113402065,7.286527247422682,9.499458762886599,70.14805412371135,60.030927835051536,12.38041237113402,41.26030927835053,10.411451182825502,4.17099175257732,802,33,149,13,8,257,118,194,0.147,0.7759999999999999,0.077,-0.9514,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,15,10,4,0,6,0,8,1,0,2,0,39,20,16,0,1,13,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,9,1,0,9,0,0,2,3,8,2,1,4,4,21,2,33,15,5,29,0,3,0,0,3,16,1,9,10,110,29,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13956403819414398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18758859690141705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126522475542386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782751392881226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832985879970887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24879158377122024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013793707326608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451474413535366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15519423977959962,0.0,0.0,0.16477434929731152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056933827040887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18373348545089074,0.1744493333690087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33198233477798184,0.0,0.2986248086756149,0.17110262270959525,0.0,0.0,0.1356742743732747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622142773951784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098198409287448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18775706497059375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12331829680948628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956380224306273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4059867753876876,0.09673984833484857,0.13018686963958168,0.0,0.0,0.29493699852387145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810387469500112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561979327338612
mentalhealth,demonprincess666,2020/01/16,12am thoughts Do you ever just get super sad? Like so god damn sad that it's an actual ache in your chest and your not sure exactly why your sad so your brain just reminds you how much you mess things up? So you just feel worse? And you sit there trying so damn hard not to drown in it?,-0.0606221198156689,2.0071929838709717,1.1868663594470057,102.32887096774193,86.90322580645163,4.833179723502305,13.695852534562215,6.1826913282559595,-1.0958599078341016,223,3,56,2,7,70,43,62,0.327,0.536,0.13699999999999998,-0.9356,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,9,0,1,10,9,2,0,1,0,1,2,2,1,3,13,4,7,1,0,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,2,9,3,4,3,1,5,0,3,0,0,9,3,2,0,2,34,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.31828059174224643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640972579475084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950262040780782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16491395447803242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040271877668722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29217114725034954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593430385873314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23976172418987746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3073975754655132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21668313465686287,0.0,0.0,0.2589309311394564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22143808620306624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943044903702059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33238018532292274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HopeHauntedmyVibe,2020/01/16,"Panic attacks? For about a month now, every now and then, I will completely freak out and get alarmed and panicked by everything. It's happening right now as I'm writing this and I don't know what it means. I feel like everything is zoomed out, like when you adjust the field of view in a video game, and every sound is like a gunshot, it panics me like something is completely wrong. Every movement I make feels like it's 1000x faster than it normally is. I don't know what's wrong with me and it's like I'm living in a fever dream. I wasn't like this before, only when I was actually in a fever dream. This usually only lasts for a few minutes though. All this all started a week before Christmas, and at the time I had a fever, so maybe that has something to do with it. I'm starting to have trouble finishing my school finals because I can't focus on anything, and every time I try, this happens. Do any of you know what this means? What should I do?",3.245429553264607,4.642902443298972,4.173587628865982,88.1757079037801,73.5360824742268,7.029003436426118,25.81993127147767,7.554174236665415,1.2270409621993128,750,25,156,9,15,242,101,194,0.142,0.748,0.11,-0.8488,0,0,2,1,0,0,22.0,0,2,0,0,8,15,1,3,10,0,17,3,0,1,2,26,33,14,0,2,0,0,2,7,0,2,3,1,0,0,18,12,0,0,8,4,0,1,4,8,0,0,3,4,16,7,19,28,3,26,0,0,1,0,4,8,0,0,24,99,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.10887702217184993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587198083386157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181327515172936,0.0,0.0,0.12692791013206525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680125338954293,0.0,0.1898770937431873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339597557897697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760128980959209,0.0,0.2005453106589508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282711383603924,0.15941242654450802,0.0,0.1222203754339911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05829114646556152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973234083127152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18394920800087816,0.09094510623147822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3815550554045938,0.0,0.09851907463588994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07447438606863523,0.0,0.11208788084963524,0.24306665354727974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905476091587247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931571099247164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697092663446804,0.0,0.2618086266966377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528086728602624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129156223145992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17178533008978145,0.0,0.0,0.15794079569064412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961776028384156,0.0,0.1301156801239306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574926039080603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287949126247576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894953787798299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439703453203737,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,allforchunky,2020/01/16,"Cat missing and took my heart My cat went missing 2 months ago. I have done everything possible to find him, but am unable to do 100% due to exhaustion, depressions, anxiety. 

I found out the cat i spent a month trapping, and inches away from was a lookalike. It then snowed a few days later...

I’m constantly crying and the emotional wound has opened up again. Idk. I figured reddit would be a good place to come to for advice / some positive energy.",2.269529411764708,4.998665423529413,3.5508823529411764,84.74397058823531,83.0,7.6352941176470575,23.794117647058826,8.548686976883017,2.0780823529411765,351,13,65,9,10,114,67,85,0.19399999999999998,0.6679999999999999,0.139,-0.5023,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,6,0,8,3,1,0,0,12,16,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,3,0,1,3,0,4,0,0,6,0,7,1,10,8,2,18,0,3,0,0,1,6,0,1,9,40,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20712774380029608,0.1878923680828721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621510783255396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19914617106010432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825873149061574,0.0,0.2290566501955623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23283135006533304,0.13669856896260674,0.0,0.18256338020579144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169116921468785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384297918807828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19049863405855932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19373029835061267,0.0,0.0,0.23240643664429725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17778446785770827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511771190127772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383736125296053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22145617111716048,0.0,0.0,0.2389563806760868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23549863911074306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964917803288449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057239978500392,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,psych_clinic_study,2020/01/16,"Calling All Previous Psychiatric Ward Patients for Ethnographic Interview! I am a sociology student at UCSB and I was a previous patient at a psychiatric clinic in California. I am hoping to publish a sociological paper about the experiences of patients that were in American psychiatric clinics. I will interview any previous patients that are interested over message or video call - whichever makes you feel more comfortable. If you feel uncomfortable at any point, you can stop the interview at any point in time. You will obviously be kept anonymous, and if any experience will be mentioned in the paper, a fake name will be used. If you wish, you can choose the name that is used. 

Every person's experiences count, and I would appreciate learning about any experiences that you have had - whether the experience was positive, negative, or somewhere in between. 

You can private message me or comment on the post if you are interested.",8.467134637514384,10.496578164556963,8.832071346375145,57.324263521288884,61.65822784810127,12.580897583429227,43.477560414269284,12.079253325248375,6.394827848101268,762,46,107,27,11,252,87,158,0.069,0.8059999999999999,0.125,0.8585,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,9,0,0,2,5,0,0,11,0,21,2,0,3,2,27,29,11,0,7,8,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,4,3,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,2,15,4,17,16,2,16,0,0,0,0,21,13,0,8,2,82,19,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4630398191074085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781126964924863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147386310485537,0.0,0.0,0.6660572843892765,0.0,0.0,0.13771472896021822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525877291251262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090208499727404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890827119834033,0.0,0.0,0.25747072007922644,0.0,0.13042405544694402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138536768469748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07940841971629836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23523386344239336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566017911001306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673929869792676,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fakerthenfake,2020/01/16,"Feeling absolutely worthless when not getting validation Sorry if this is a rant or rambling,  I know it's unhealthy for me to be like this but I can't seam to stop. Back story,  I'm 34m, 2 years out of a long relationship with an abusive partner.  Now a single father with sole custody so free time isn't that available along with the stresses of raising kids alone.  Anyway I have felt quite lonely for the past 2 years not being able to find time or the courage to do so.  Recently I started a long distance relationship and it brought feeling back i hasn't felt for a long time.  Here is where I know it has gone bad.  I now put 100% of my time into this girl,  it's easy because I can't go do much else with the kids around all the time so sitting at home being able to talk for hours and message had been great. But it's a Rolla coaster because of for some reason she can't reply or is doing her life and is not giving me her undivided attention I get incredible feelings of sorry in my stomach.  I actually feel sick,  I'm constantly worrying and thinking what if this ends and I go back to having no opposite sex attention.  What if I mess it up and she wants to stop talking.  Then I'll get a message and I'm fine again.  The other night she was stressed and said she wanted to be by herself for the night.  This entire night I was a mess and kept thinking I stuffed something up,  going over our texts. Then the morning came and she called me and it was all fine but  she apologised for not calling last night as she just want feeling well.  I writting this right now because I'm doing it again right now.  I can't help it and I want it to stop. But the fear of losing the connection with someone is eating me up.  I'm self aware enough that I'm pretty sure I dont let this show to her which is good. I don't really know what I'm asking,  just how can I get rid of these feelings that aren't even true,  and how do I stop fearing the end when it's not even happening.  Worse still how do I make sure I get through it if it does end.  

Tl;Dr feel worthless if I'm not getting continues validation back from opposite sex as soon as I want it.",3.112076065394348,4.253665270880365,4.402113687666738,87.41165127573706,73.49209932279909,7.1755660441890665,27.193994117244678,7.5764669431780325,1.3717229495861551,1677,61,360,20,33,554,205,443,0.153,0.7070000000000001,0.14,-0.9278,0,3,1,0,0,0,31.0,1,0,0,2,29,22,0,4,20,0,35,6,1,5,5,81,81,38,0,10,20,1,9,1,1,0,2,1,1,5,30,23,1,5,18,1,1,7,16,11,1,0,12,10,42,12,45,64,6,64,0,4,0,2,30,12,0,9,45,240,72,0,0.14829111363690972,0.0878503604586944,0.07235536782965615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679243573396159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600526533932996,0.06931608671081348,0.0,0.0,0.2280534258452231,0.06190844288143248,0.13559532972705834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142180696373822,0.08480276439859602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012500622911832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06488527642991995,0.0,0.0868980403839364,0.0,0.0,0.07586941508383152,0.061939098571772926,0.0,0.19701286732180312,0.07661218055013938,0.0,0.09794488199037744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668687302251778,0.2624315494648543,0.0,0.14238272424346204,0.0,0.06776769567204878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23242795915584166,0.07112717431660494,0.12641588587486596,0.06218977524720365,0.0,0.08174573814915641,0.0,0.0,0.06556667102509788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049698203814150584,0.0,0.07437403894808889,0.0,0.07301843798112563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224537686078164,0.06043852488268282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758188553620385,0.052371199525495585,0.03622377382475858,0.0,0.0,0.19684945367918608,0.0,0.08294991238092947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049492734926003035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054505515558674535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783223292654132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078032372784518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543268709320933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453676374275646,0.0,0.07886292643341601,0.0,0.0,0.04749954230339224,0.07623398133442151,0.07320979237160008,0.1592091596459945,0.0,0.12663980079704168,0.07052940369601605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734998630673197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06282328968085052,0.057080872063006785,0.0,0.16599976094422975,0.052480606741188936,0.0,0.05921273745293833,0.2479560220739541,0.16986696964770628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976261964954406,0.0,0.0,0.11919077997379893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950189578858001,0.0,0.0,0.21617435221807088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186648522833027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666576010319315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529841206011735,0.07556065683013867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549461526702982
mentalhealth,dogsveon,2020/01/16,"Experiences with Psychiatric Emergency Programs? I’ve been ignoring hospitalization as a legit option as my parents have discussed in the past not wanting to admit me in concern that it would be on my “record.” Recently I’ve had friends and even a teacher suggest it, but I told myself that as long as my therapist hadn’t directly said something that I shouldn’t legitimately consider it. Well, during our session today, she expressed her concern and that hospitalization is starting to sound like the logical next step. I need some advice from people with experience if this is something worth getting involved in. I live in the state of New York & would be going to CPEP so if anyone has any personal experience with that program or knows how the procedure goes it’d put a lot of my anxiety to rest. I’m scared to say the least and I’m really struggling to validate how severe my depression has gotten. it’s very difficult to gauge how far is far enough to be admitted and I really struggle with giving myself permission to seek help, so some light being shed would be greatly appreciated. thank you to anyone who took the time to read or has some advice to share",8.198055555555555,8.30702787962963,8.529074074074074,65.97333333333333,61.87037037037037,11.82962962962963,37.907407407407405,11.374738998889045,4.6096462962962965,946,43,155,25,12,313,136,216,0.125,0.735,0.139,0.532,1,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,1,1,0,0,7,12,0,3,9,0,20,0,0,3,0,33,36,18,0,8,6,1,0,1,1,4,0,3,0,1,12,8,0,1,4,1,1,4,3,6,1,0,7,4,17,6,28,19,7,20,0,1,0,0,20,7,0,9,9,109,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25420841724042714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140932243169168,0.0,0.08845297192693889,0.0,0.09950421951852746,0.0,0.0,0.18189781127790167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203025504135827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13439846507440295,0.0,0.08591089371738496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38170418944564943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004927950718974,0.0,0.06795690695353862,0.1247762821079736,0.0739225403436711,0.0,0.0,0.14340411217548488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718407780085727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714838071202813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354628684747744,0.0,0.11485537674465443,0.11510904330198905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058200236122824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644625090797143,0.0,0.12562371125261454,0.1383323463280975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444288308025526,0.0,0.12416781245726374,0.09017509004518247,0.11357327750410905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307576232226385,0.0,0.0,0.13010653972645742,0.0,0.16665406287802034,0.0,0.12842975689380615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372763092356907,0.10343795070612667,0.13022410304383564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14694359151398162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20027054536989086,0.0,0.0,0.0920651643321008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719576133684454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975221476520055,0.0,0.1510228516546177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584564469496549,0.0,0.12329242202190975,0.12428874000371533,0.14451404532349027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732247814668436,0.07671944670303077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694975611644083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27719684524500643,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,acatcookie,2020/01/16,"Trying to help a Mexican friend I am trying to help a Mexican friend in terms of seeking help for his mental health. He came up to me about his deteriorating mental health and him not knowing where to go to. I went to research on Google to see if there was any information as to hospitals, costs of medication, insurance, where to turn to for help, where to go, etc.

Unfortunately, in trying to research into the topic, I could not find much information other than the mental health stigma in Mexico. I didn't know where to ask for help on this topic so I figured turning to this subreddit would be a great start. I am still naive pertaining to the Mexican laws for mental health, where to seek help, etc so I would really appreciate any tidbit of information to help.

For further information, my friend lives in Mexico City. 
Thank you for taking the time to read this! As stated above, any piece of information -- whether small or big -- would help me heaps!",6.691639427987745,7.3766517696629235,7.29394279877426,71.59022982635345,65.01123595505618,10.74239019407559,29.664964249233908,10.637119530657019,3.1280157303370792,757,24,137,19,11,250,94,178,0.023,0.768,0.209,0.9883,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,0,10,5,0,0,7,0,9,5,0,0,0,22,22,8,0,5,5,0,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,9,1,1,4,3,0,0,0,4,1,14,5,40,13,5,25,0,0,1,0,22,16,0,2,4,93,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19767222360059228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09058212093038097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082007978944204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736138593380573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161232008202309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855868667469294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22457848306225994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101333481178952,0.0,0.0,0.10682516411323884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4119720289713827,0.0,0.0,0.519564092150496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650000632783237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555852606947112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760976841185956,0.3905824767712701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122769671500223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691948332329924,0.0,0.06207230513479645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721138550339537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858154999665522,0.0,0.07737908469873593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728516749827139,0.0,0.0,0.08920629820964977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05649924063474086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19735249525564294,0.21078409228210596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982102519040351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20649058130727732,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Unusualhell,2020/01/16,"I always feel like I'm making progress and then I dont again I went on holiday and felt very self confident and happy and was looking forward to going back to school with my new mindset, but as soon as I arrived back home I immediately started feeling depressed and anxious again, I feel like I've obsessed over my mental health to the point that I dont even know what's causing it, and cant figure out a solution, but I feel like I've tried everything and it just dosnt work
 I always get this feeling that I've found a definite reason why I'm so sad/disturbed, then I try to work on it, I feel quite a bit better, and then later I just feel like crap again, 
Like how am I ever even suposed to trust myself to be really feeling what I'm really feeling if it just fucking changes all the time. 


Every time I've gone to a therapist its caused me to have a horrible panic attack, and it has caused me to fall into a depressive episode that lasted 2 weeks, so I feel like it's not the right option for me :( but everyone always pushes it as the only and best option so I feel really hopeless",7.874062500000001,5.479012566964286,8.528142857142857,73.81685714285717,63.95535714285714,11.281428571428574,35.792857142857144,9.642632912329526,3.234029999999999,861,30,171,13,10,292,120,224,0.16,0.639,0.201,0.6403,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,6,17,18,3,2,10,0,8,3,1,6,2,46,33,24,0,1,8,0,12,6,0,0,1,0,1,1,14,13,0,0,16,1,0,6,4,8,0,0,5,13,21,10,19,27,3,30,0,3,1,1,1,8,2,3,24,108,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248463278976528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175797098490312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247216796102812,0.0,0.1385226778743754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452709614950368,0.07966312501713968,0.09833746892015564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775924015129685,0.0952863388093866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15516119246132798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21113209260338986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898604274074714,0.08147708145028304,0.07589122205098109,0.08606955818039086,0.0809526948653708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5009852774810744,0.32174438488247736,0.0864851565906272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876148164207052,0.0,0.08327195299868105,0.04705994249054386,0.0,0.0511911246888632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588543805314713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574444009829974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035155688838044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04950230966788281,0.07342232446188582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26403361235152617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563946650053152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060125088249536336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077339702902523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699402153542082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850532884107442,0.0,0.10568242059839328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514903572838503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580477657003786,0.0,0.0,0.17311111481759547,0.09261106427435337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692269592910883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911596874415296,0.0,0.0,0.09396681674079936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06375483424831667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458284569195166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050457367032194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230865418983056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743204756652425,0.0,0.0,0.0722519221857556,0.0,0.0,0.08349949182115801,0.0812777665224994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114987605773362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mimi_23896,2020/01/16,"16F and I always feel like I am living some sort of facade [sorry if this writing is scrambled and hard to follow. I tend to journal in non-lucid ways. This journal entry is from today. It is kind of long.]

Today, during class I did that thing that always do. I escaped. I just drifted off, and melted into my thoughts. I left the classroom, and became engulfed in my thoughts. I escaped into myself. 

I tend to do this often. My mind will constantly race with intrusive thoughts. I can discern between evil are irrational and rational, but that doesn’t help me at all. There is nothing I can do about it.

In that moment I thought about all of my shortcomings. All of the things I haven’t done. I have let 3 years fly by. I have done nothing. I am painfully aware of this. It is agonizing to know that I still feel fat, even though rationally I know this not to be true. I still don’t have friends. I still hate myself. I still feel like life has nothing to offer me.

Usually, I don’t write about these things, because I don’t want to give these weak thoughts power. But sometimes I do think about giving up; just letting go. 

In that moment when I was sitting at my desk I realized how boring, and unfulfilling my life is. I don’t think I am destined for anything worthwhile. I am not a unique person 

I am not a visionary that is going to have some profound impact on humanity. I am no one. My life literally amounts to nothing. I am just another person, and don’t see the point in devoting my life to that. 

I have no redeeming qualities, and I don’t think I can ever be satisfied with building a family. The idea of marrying, or even dating someone and than have children with them seems absolutely unsatisfying to me. It seems like everyone else wants this.

I don‘t think I will ever love someone enough to do this. I don‘t think I will ever truly love someone. I think I love my family, but I am uncertain about that. I don’t know if it is forced love or real love. How do you know if you love someone?

People always say, “You just know“. But, it’s insane to me how love can be such a powerful intoxicating thing(it seems like), but people can so quickly fall out of its trance. 

Life isn’t exciting for me. I think I am just broken by design. I yearn for that special connection with someone. I just want so badly to meet someone who I fully understand, and they fully understand me. I just want to feel understood.

I am just bathing in loneliness. Everyday I go to school, and I keep my head down and just get through the day unnoticed. I try to make myself invisible to others.

The thing is I really like people, but it pains me to have to be so Surface Level with every person I talk to; every person in my life. 

I will watch people talking to each other, and I wonder what they are thinking while they are talking. Do they feel the same as me? Are they just better at concealing the pain they feel? Does everyone feel like this? Maybe we all are miserable.

I wish I knew the answers to my questions. Maybe than I wouldn’t feels so aware of it all. Maybe than I wouldn’t want to rid myself of it all so badly. I wish I knew the answers to all of my questions. I am becoming impatient, and scared that I may never find the answers.",2.2455600268276332,4.50709159311424,3.785119606528056,85.99070422535212,79.07824726134585,6.686250838363515,24.54035323049408,7.793537801064563,1.421855980326403,2524,92,496,42,63,835,253,639,0.11900000000000001,0.718,0.163,0.9871,2,0,0,0,0,0,86.0,1,3,7,3,38,33,2,3,15,0,74,20,2,4,12,130,136,37,0,13,24,0,9,6,1,7,12,1,1,6,39,24,1,1,44,1,0,6,20,13,0,1,12,12,101,20,74,111,13,51,0,2,2,7,39,21,0,17,28,381,140,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230539210843792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055577076516437056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04361601864424284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850868636704577,0.03230944481092687,0.05853639548013305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04687584222755813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05727618654593536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03418181803401037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04638228902295053,0.10847861900356924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0442762569545323,0.0,0.0,0.054765094586488726,0.0,0.07001446360027587,0.14382966326278213,0.08931271402052016,0.10129110624248268,0.0,0.0,0.09993088209726934,0.0,0.21439468279576368,0.1135936283200702,0.0,0.0,0.048442744179030967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040949109235186236,0.0,0.027691286764736804,0.10168843651615538,0.0903665435111963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047479260195926215,0.05232836843852772,0.0543952042800152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0355260327158982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05983265390258032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04711049268545302,0.0,0.055193285998716805,0.14564219376230525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05758668114088191,0.1083959954024254,0.22462070717942165,0.15536420335882498,0.0,0.04680161762045138,0.04690498243937375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3348537659251001,0.0,0.03537915629216012,0.0,0.15974249125256074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053516774272298624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04087830556265323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034268748138228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03591543525903198,0.0,0.16919316303534612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697927786409265,0.1851167357176812,0.0,0.0,0.050103893912945584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187484371509933,0.0,0.0,0.060327725679457926,0.033954351754258566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042149210194607205,0.05306411287277861,0.053640716769562696,0.04223562403752745,0.14475272119445226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694498480711812,0.0,0.05242019949979061,0.05933124826995099,0.0,0.0,0.16930943064401222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278026736524716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760604191629295,0.2716916385231886,0.052074063019525364,0.210387801260362,0.0,0.0,0.10047914089032488,0.0,0.0,0.035984787036875146,0.0,0.0,0.11035362084837226,0.0,0.0,0.05837406598383685,0.0,0.15630936532603198,0.04207041321113052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189905749972345,0.0,0.057478261421822836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034131463169727816
mentalhealth,drkcty,2020/01/16,"We need more mods The responsibility of moderating is tough. I really hope the current mod(s) realize that this sub is extremely important as it could be emergency situations or crises. Living with mental health conditions or situations can be very tricky and it takes a village! I hope they will be posting the apps soon! Very happy to be part of this sub, hoping all your journeys are going well. Keep fighting!",6.13867579908676,8.589150835616437,6.935821917808219,67.00638127853883,68.04109589041096,10.346118721461188,31.34474885844749,10.504223727775694,3.9680337899543385,333,14,52,10,6,110,58,73,0.098,0.6920000000000001,0.21,0.8946,1,0,0,0,2,0,9.0,1,1,1,0,2,7,1,0,4,0,10,1,0,0,1,13,17,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,5,5,11,3,5,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,5,2,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15397459922043835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960079070822117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052918331430092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20498995488904545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5746290743765187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714134584003356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702896038174709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19434689411730904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299542888020034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088371690365458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846964714231759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354430043428855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4335417397941275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14499879135566546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182419979334342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17339482225454847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fadedlambent,2020/01/16,"Need advice My roommate and friend had a psychotic break last night after a smoke session with her friend. My other roommate picked her up off the street late at night and got her to come home after some coaxing. However for 4 hours (10pm to 2am) there were two ‘personalities’ present (this was new), talking about killing/harming herself (not new), being uncooperative and combative, whole nine yards. After we had her speak with the university on-call counselor we had to file a petition to have her committed and I watched her get led off in handcuffs. It was a very stressful, tearful, and traumatic experience but it was all we could do. 

She came home not even 9 hrs later STILL out of it saying that she convinced the staff to let her go, that she saw her therapist and that she promises she’ll go to outpatient care (that she has flaked on in the past) However after talking to her it feels like she’s treating parts of last night as a joke, saying things along the line of “wow that’s craaazzyyy”, comparing herself to “Twice” from MHA, and saying that she may still go to an alcoholic get together tomorrow (she is NOT supposed to drink on her meds). I ended up snapping at her for not taking this seriously, among other things. I feel horrible, but I don’t know what else to do. I’m still really on edge from last night.

I don’t know how long I’ll keep this post up, but I need advice on moving forward.  She keeps refusing/getting out of treatment and it feels like we’re just waiting until the next time she tries something. We love her and are terrified of something happening to her, but we are also 3rd year college students with full course loads with little to no free time between school and work. The lot of us also have our own mental health issues we are working through. I feel stuck.",6.70395652173913,6.838504634782609,6.494601449275365,79.22364130434786,64.97101449275362,9.566666666666668,33.19202898550725,9.255337874911486,2.78879420289855,1429,55,272,23,20,449,194,345,0.061,0.825,0.114,0.9651,2,0,5,0,0,0,40.0,8,0,0,2,10,14,0,1,13,0,23,4,0,3,2,54,49,19,0,3,9,0,4,2,2,2,2,4,3,1,19,25,2,3,6,3,1,8,7,2,0,3,11,10,43,13,53,33,7,58,0,0,2,1,44,20,0,3,32,188,62,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827736964696786,0.0,0.09994464281991293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495761258304438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696218438426054,0.09535006746806084,0.0,0.0,0.08055936366025325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466826266679888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161418362297577,0.0,0.0,0.0781241192903677,0.0,0.08283113091886991,0.0,0.0,0.06176920411289585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914806918673094,0.0,0.0,0.18914647404766954,0.1336216862025481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450693508302592,0.0,0.14658131960434126,0.0,0.1594490390724917,0.0,0.07479663993516643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269959600237724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940758977912488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876167533873309,0.0,0.09209854987837117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761078204394492,0.0,0.16625008542008554,0.0,0.0,0.10279250236424932,0.2286943127948763,0.1054948488449894,0.0,0.0,0.09563073143370554,0.0,0.09137848282223507,0.09373179996812983,0.0,0.08276242608243181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950752203246142,0.08440562360488307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387984952814157,0.0,0.0942463562944708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939716271870076,0.0,0.1386880731995577,0.0,0.18064476636242904,0.09945978403931964,0.3510494559023699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012732533233418,0.08927560429245593,0.0,0.08165822349607625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956649156210968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05991142904425811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231130284084145,0.0,0.0946474260466404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399282395371532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22405603589413844,0.0,0.10712706276208582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031554486342874,0.1503359740083234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085841497616494,0.12426131868483402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906475082541148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349407082884717,0.0,0.09135563754343633,0.0,0.11249327487608222,0.0,0.0,0.07716395176090292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044119533977036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616762566416404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060223936792237226
mentalhealth,jmcleandavis,2020/01/16,"My Story - My blog on depression and anxiety Starting a blog, this is my story

[https://my-mentalhealthstory.blogspot.com/p/my-story.html](https://my-mentalhealthstory.blogspot.com/p/my-story.html)",34.674375,45.5466376875,18.505,-23.359999999999985,15.875,10.7,33.0,10.125756701596842,5.289475,177,4,10,3,2,42,12,16,0.293,0.7070000000000001,0.0,-0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,8,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5658046945470553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6370307162893917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5235044547397262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lavender-dreamss,2020/01/16,"everyone says you should love yourself, but i don’t know how this is mostly me just rambling, but maybe someone out there feels the same way too.

all my life i’ve been so self conscious. i pick and prod every aspect of my appearance, my body, my personality. i wish i would allow myself to accept my flaws, my imperfections, my self hatred but i don’t know how... i know everyone has their insecurities, but mine control almost every aspect of my life. my boyfriend is a photographer and he wants me to model for him so badly. i want him to take picture because for him it’s more than me being a model, it’s his way of making and keeping memories. but the idea that they’ll even turn out slightly bad or my lack of confidence will show through the pictures and it terrifies me. i want to be able to be walk outside comfortably and confidently without thinking everyone is looking at me and judging me. they say appearance is everything for first impression, and i’m so terrified i’m not good enough looking that it will ruin every interaction with anyone i come into contact with.

it’s easier for me just to put this out into the world, not saying any of this to someone i know directly because i don’t want to pile my insecure garbage on top of someone.",4.683333333333334,6.180266407407405,5.8939300411522675,76.85101851851854,70.1111111111111,8.85679012345679,31.195473251028808,9.2995712137729,2.9138460905349794,999,43,181,21,18,334,135,243,0.165,0.7,0.135,-0.9458,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,3,3,10,10,0,2,6,0,17,4,1,6,1,56,40,18,0,8,11,0,1,0,0,5,2,3,0,3,10,15,0,2,9,1,0,5,6,5,0,1,1,6,39,5,30,31,6,17,0,1,2,1,18,9,0,5,1,133,49,0,0.1159915242365099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161487565819025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887821399967489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110397068343785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19369615553656336,0.1414147131603437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884043500940434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991642753829776,0.0,0.0,0.1300943573907435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11985025102517732,0.0,0.07661130781609601,0.0,0.2931835855280365,0.3325046163466637,0.10424570280711687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05864879980932896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986623312612777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728818734899143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309403123261651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309859623002124,0.0,0.0,0.254983633119863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16385648769029526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19480733429360594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468687923491006,0.0,0.07742524311681706,0.0,0.11652907641606915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127932496166614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660351893165695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27672334689528305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420089131802943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2948377262366148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721119090255505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432268519828192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261654705646668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736592249258408,0.1841373459557904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13338452851571234,0.11181169019680062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823970508582061,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oldbroki,2020/01/16,"I cant express myself and it hurts i dont know whats wrong with me 
i have no one who listens to my mind 
I need help 
Please",-1.3580000000000003,0.055991199999997576,1.2900000000000027,103.625,87.0,4.0,16.666666666666668,3.1291,-1.2813333333333334,96,2,27,0,3,33,26,30,0.172,0.583,0.245,0.308,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,1,7,0,2,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,18,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4223640815570201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415559213562836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.385795527392204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19805608233232494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638822781237905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672180928798591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442036273592977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3955903363476445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3940202678055593,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Empty-Pick,2020/01/16,im not okay nothing bad has ever happened in my life. i have no reason to feel the way i do. im just so sad and depressed all the time. its been like that for a year now. i have anxiety and icd as well. i cut. i cant cry anymore. its all for no reason. im stupid ugly worthless and undeserving of love and help and nothing will make me believe otherwise. i need help really bad and i know i do. i just cant convinve myself that im worthy of it. i have a therapist. im just a really private person and wont share this with her. nobody knows. i dont know how long ill do this but i cant see it being a long time. i want to slice my fingers off or peel my skin off or rip my eyeballs out bc im so ugly and i feel bad that ppl have to look at me and i deserve to be in excrutiating pain. i cant do this. everything is too hard. im losing motivation for anything. nothing matters. i just want to sleep all the time bc its the closest to dying ill get. i feel so stupid. idk what to do,-2.018439393939396,-0.1672228136363607,1.4918181818181822,96.2410606060606,99.86363636363636,4.303030303030304,17.12121212121212,6.1124844417494595,-0.3328333333333333,751,23,183,9,33,270,111,220,0.24600000000000002,0.6679999999999999,0.086,-0.9852,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,12,16,3,0,8,1,21,8,3,5,4,38,36,17,1,3,8,0,6,1,0,2,4,0,0,1,12,11,0,0,9,0,0,0,9,11,1,0,1,8,26,5,20,31,3,16,0,4,2,1,6,7,0,2,9,117,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714490147122314,0.0,0.09262546039032214,0.0,0.0,0.07685838121334743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339496325757234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522726866215168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259303069751154,0.0,0.0,0.08044333576401384,0.0,0.096932107505222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094614545456426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448360206835351,0.0,0.0,0.08393986551347038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416741094152447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048796463790332506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259131216783533,0.0,0.08366602897965075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520507145540524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7061990969461075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398686441650736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596958517168729,0.045629417584926585,0.0,0.0,0.16530811996094955,0.07843057795820522,0.10448817975104306,0.0,0.0,0.08429510596002569,0.0,0.06234371604360923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925324004757533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688529486324023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938177935137404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155130319671007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196659664086678,0.19205686217554124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442590575580621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346518975378036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844197363655284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338291812821795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101768126562402,0.07413477793005581,0.0,0.0,0.08397578399978904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060145081766066526
mentalhealth,yahyeet420xd,2020/01/16,I don't even know anymore I feel nothing at all for hours and I suddenly just cry and breakdown when i'm alone. I cry for hours straight and i just dont know what to fucking do with myself anymore i feel so miserable and empty inside. Even hurting myself doesn't give me the excitement or the feeling of being alive anymore. I just don't know who to ask for help since I feel like such a gigantic burden,2.8278485370051603,4.585713024096389,3.9619965576592087,87.77590361445783,75.3855421686747,6.670567986230638,27.5197934595525,7.447530270364453,1.5106468158347677,323,13,65,4,7,105,51,83,0.221,0.62,0.159,-0.7636,0,1,0,0,0,2,3.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,1,1,3,0,6,1,0,0,1,17,17,7,0,0,4,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,4,11,2,8,16,1,6,0,2,0,1,4,2,1,1,5,44,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17467669703623048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5017841404176618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767054349035456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3705212764356556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19766351370560856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227913246163145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3411100572266225,0.12048784217828395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591970524127996,0.0,0.16179015238150732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130465261053046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33218426912449445,0.0,0.18054967940250014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780666930785604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239677652388834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182992974522406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13951394213420867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lynlox,2020/01/16,"I don't know what's wrong with me I'm not here to self diagnose or do the whole internet doctor thing. I'm genuinely worried about the state of my mental health and I've found myself completely unable to express myself or find help in real life. I've suffered from depression for a couple years, but my family never took it seriously until I had a nervous breakdown and had to go to the ER. I went to therapy for a while after that but it was so hard because it felt like my parents were holding (dragging) my hand along the way, a lot of pressure for me to ""get well"" and ""it's the hormones. My mom is an immigrant who has lived through a civil war and had an unstable semi-abusive childhood, her philosophy is very much get over it, you're being dramatic, you're in control of your own self. 

She means well but doesn't always do well, so eventually I declared myself well and dropped therapy. I self-harmed extensively previously and promised to stop once it was discovered at the ER, but once I dropped therapy I continued to do it in secret, albiet sporadically. Lately I've noticed a trend in my mood, one that I don't have much control over and is seriously affecting me. I have a lot of energy and need very little sleep (in fact, sometimes I ensure I get very little sleep because I think it means I will be in this mood once I wake up, though that doesn't typically work) I am confident and bold at school, I have no problems in debates, I can work quickly and thoroughly, I am self-confident and don't doubt myself or criticise myself. Even if I demean myself in this mood, I see it as light hearted and dismiss it. 

On the other hand I experience an incredibly depressive state wherein I feel like there is a fog around me, I have no motivation to do anything other than lie in bed. I have tried very desperately to fight through this, to simply tell myself positive things, but it's not working.

 I also experience a very panicked, nervous mood, where everything upsets me, I am sensitive, touchy, upset, and I feel a sudden urge to hurt myself. Battling with self harm is something I've done for a while but it feels so much harder right now. The other night I felt this desperate desire to slam my head into the wall, I don't want to hurt myself but I don't know how to communicate to my parents that I need help, and I feel very ashamed for needing it at all. 

When I'm in these moods I'm semi aware that I'm in them, and I want to stop, I really do, but I can't. I can do things to lessen them, like take a nap, write, read, but generally can't focus on them for long, and they might make me feel better for a bit, and then I will go right back into the mood. I feel like since I am aware of them this is something I am creating for myself, but I don't know. I just need some advice. I know I need help but I don't know where to start in asking for it.",5.379679975617192,5.300780419689122,6.540244336076398,78.50351493447124,67.77374784110536,9.782403738697553,30.67362592705476,9.5536054971066,2.5980344000812767,2249,79,457,43,34,760,255,579,0.156,0.7,0.14400000000000002,-0.8122,2,0,2,0,1,4,66.0,0,1,5,7,22,37,3,7,26,0,48,11,7,6,3,89,89,44,1,10,18,3,11,4,0,3,4,0,1,3,33,23,0,5,20,2,0,4,16,20,6,1,12,13,77,11,67,72,10,59,0,5,1,0,24,30,0,9,24,321,110,7,0.0,0.07548200546218027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06225343620165511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050946213741543664,0.053009066150685576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05242517437945187,0.056712457101624585,0.059557151597375964,0.0,0.0,0.04898650912027767,0.0,0.07767000890805499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634338665819024,0.06955120117575113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679524815329294,0.0,0.14290493077576424,0.0,0.0704902362885667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974095052527187,0.06466094522902148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520649255826476,0.0,0.06519405822079663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042077665241148095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057255461505442286,0.12463472643700875,0.060056993768427165,0.0,0.19327208754321007,0.09102413835075984,0.12233681811833096,0.0,0.05822675681885275,0.0,0.0,0.06985109291027325,0.0,0.0,0.09985234204482048,0.0,0.07241195549864983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706867734722396,0.0,0.06538143916907269,0.06771722811112148,0.0,0.0754927295922928,0.12810374614879572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363986498554835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17505764263521573,0.0,0.07186391662505225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04499791632048064,0.1244954752342445,0.12770167134744775,0.05625417085877129,0.05637841233759368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832229245241852,0.0,0.0,0.042524707565420976,0.0,0.0,0.1387905145196853,0.0,0.0,0.06420135547009229,0.06758272631405017,0.0,0.07461250062882926,0.0,0.0,0.14049523308626274,0.2361885020553669,0.049134523601032265,0.0,0.0,0.05978440915941484,0.0,0.0,0.07253048420472771,0.0,0.20353662414199228,0.043169299145033216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14147747114986506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06095869468297169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372392588887912,0.07251215578519528,0.0408121343256353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088103234361366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447456732400088,0.0507659805736215,0.0,0.33229983681452746,0.0,0.0,0.052698828948622906,0.0,0.1275053883232076,0.0,0.0,0.0980890385503132,0.06300754138514023,0.0,0.04509192021539293,0.0,0.0,0.10652328410972604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04789949944319552,0.0,0.055682451510432295,0.0,0.2185624424464952,0.0,0.1269716741166282,0.04082067199666691,0.06259149549417968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078047216886782,0.043252657946683794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315388126900101,0.07515170791903837,0.05056740200885432,0.0,0.0,0.22911984615546835,0.0590567361301692,0.0,0.0711262397717327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13913767835440982,0.06469723198332962,0.0,0.0,0.06965326024857947,0.0,0.041025017049212194
mentalhealth,MusicTherapy1,2020/01/16,"Music Therapy Please take my survey about music therapy/mental health!!
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdeWQZjwM75JCxIbkM9q2hEFmTbhxGUIgGoaL0OgPxP9hXMOA/viewform?usp=sf_link",48.29500000000001,62.56587183333335,25.1,-74.20499999999998,-2.6666666666666567,12.4,31.0,10.125756701596842,6.8457,170,3,5,3,2,39,10,12,0.0,0.7759999999999999,0.22399999999999998,0.4374,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5181795691925369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5351181409422502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665321614358405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.557487832996486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NotaweebNoku,2020/01/16,"Need some help with self esteem So like a lot of others on here I have terrible self esteem, I don't exactly know why, I just don't feel like a good person. I feel like I weigh others down and I'm just a hindrance to them. I use video games to escape it but now living with my dad it's becoming harder and harder to go to my escape. I know this isn't okay but I'm not sure what to do.",-0.9468965517241372,0.9385385057471254,1.9087471264367828,96.8734655172414,89.22988505747125,4.859310344827586,13.297701149425285,6.2581,-0.9005898850574714,298,4,73,3,10,104,53,87,0.124,0.741,0.135,-0.0272,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,0,3,1,5,1,0,1,2,19,14,5,0,1,5,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,4,1,0,4,2,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,2,10,6,10,14,2,4,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,4,46,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25517589599611085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23365102527443246,0.33012345736093845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13131069151879066,0.19379326427040647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15486753420857993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539574019431983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3386371801050298,0.0,0.20402084228809955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19642992694891345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17132019330291842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20174341327809744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4820698025702177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21776131347320046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19955248718696655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20848613489232592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spring13r,2020/01/16,"possible depression? you tell me. So i’ll start off saying that I have never been to a psychiatrist or diagnosed with any mental illness. I don’t like to say that I am depressed because I was never actually diagnosed with it and I do not want to take away from people who do have it. I know some people are so depressed that they cannot even leave their house to do their daily activities. However, ever since the start of my senior year I’ve been very sad most of the time. Right around that time I also started smoking weed. I’ve usually been able to keep it only to the weekends but there were some times when I realized I was becoming dependent on it for happiness. About halfway through my first semester at college I decided to stop for a while and made it about a month and a half without it. However, I noticed that this did not have a great impact on the happiness with life. Because of this I think that it is a coincidence that I became sad and started smoking weed around the same time. 

I have a very hard time talking about myself to anyone but I knew one of my friends takes prozac for depression/ anxiety and has seen a psychologist and used to see a therapist. So I asked him about a year ago if he felt better after doing all of those things and he said yes. A couple weeks before I asked him this I had a kind of breakdown at his house when we were hanging out (I was high at the time tho but it’s also happened sober.) and he said that he thinks I might have some kind of anxiety problem. 

About halfway through senior year I got into my first real relationship with a girl which ended up lasting about 2 months. She also took prozac but I never talked to her about it. Since it was my first relationship I didn’t really know what to do and it ended up being kinda toxic which I think was mostly my fault. I want to be in a relationship again but I don’t think I need to improve myself more first.

Now back to the period when I was taking a break from weed that same friend asked me if I was interested in doing shrooms. I was a bit scared at first but after doing more research about how they could be potentially beneficial in helping with depression/self exploration I was more interested in them. I was however scared of having a bad trip as I had just failed out of one of my classes for my major and was very stressed about that at the time. So I ended up taking a very small amount and had a good time but it didn’t affect me mentally at all which is was kinda sad about since that’s the main reason I wanted to take them.

Fast forward to present day and now I have been smoking everyday for the past two weeks. I know that it’s not sustainable for the long term and I want to try and improve my situation but I have always had a hard time actually putting my thoughts into action. I think I might want to go see a psychiatrist/therapist but since I have a very hard time opening up to people I don’t know how much that will really help me plus I would probably have to get my parents to pay for it and that would mean talking to them about it which would be very hard for me to do. 

Sorry the post is all over the place. I tried to make it pretty short but there’s a lot to tell and a lot that I couldn’t even fit but I guess I just wanted to write it down. Any advice is appreciated. Thanks!",4.100674022319879,5.066962292719172,5.143353672030603,83.69125699472038,70.94650817236257,8.4022509563403,26.35481015459517,8.718977153904607,1.730811033479814,2625,81,544,45,47,864,270,673,0.109,0.78,0.111,0.9038,4,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,1,1,7,7,37,27,0,3,37,1,66,6,0,8,7,112,114,46,0,15,20,1,5,1,2,6,6,4,0,1,43,30,0,2,17,1,1,8,14,14,0,9,34,12,80,13,95,68,21,101,0,8,3,0,41,34,0,16,60,408,123,7,0.053306046245685385,0.0,0.10403802329234713,0.0,0.0,0.05209005145028881,0.04725259369401493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788647777119164,0.0443549007347415,0.0,0.0,0.07249987877856089,0.0,0.08155795894576914,0.0,0.0,0.037272826962293004,0.0,0.0,0.0949073653935068,0.1495018723572475,0.0,0.05008278517556093,0.040989059177065384,0.04450832202010811,0.06498974204507303,0.05887234003500495,0.04535951917925525,0.0,0.0,0.04714486603440881,0.058196396355354015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0425605403747194,0.05898212627364709,0.0,0.034377989929289525,0.0,0.1836496780851764,0.10820902971182456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164000470271154,0.0,0.0,0.0704162816079592,0.04821837065796455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051182163900207814,0.0,0.0,0.22671047852586815,0.0,0.0,0.08236823819610309,0.0,0.027850209037447757,0.0,0.0302950545197408,0.04471058250264687,0.042633714782672825,0.05877010417274287,0.0587226197164155,0.0,0.04713836064913838,0.11349055490086865,0.19100698824639625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145983831050594,0.056320764563592474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123016040721505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047380863168042464,0.0,0.11102008841895804,0.117182435772337,0.043451542353450966,0.0,0.05644340618871621,0.0,0.0,0.03765163691040254,0.026042641603241896,0.0,0.0,0.047174173483981514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063778855165748,0.0,0.0504394698439448,0.03558219979722778,0.0,0.0,0.05806591156449493,0.0,0.0,0.10743991379953664,0.1130985823640709,0.0,0.0,0.08509675508791997,0.0,0.03918607746287037,0.03952575785271628,0.12333872723455325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060689286960808435,0.0,0.0,0.07224311301479305,0.04054165023228383,0.0,0.0,0.0591900560105732,0.0,0.05088665284636437,0.11086710182878183,0.0,0.05569347271314391,0.0,0.0,0.06009455776138459,0.051052457151197835,0.05423141290141471,0.057472933737736036,0.05100668711832522,0.0,0.05358729970568047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067395080629714,0.06829843640862095,0.0548074936500298,0.0,0.17169223331087824,0.0,0.045523072234526965,0.10141251388281887,0.08478221504520189,0.10673730321377163,0.0,0.08495603460147637,0.0,0.05560983185095608,0.0,0.0,0.17638124921565398,0.059918229415936025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596717545417594,0.15092117558964166,0.0,0.0,0.04456624154813995,0.06106189587210226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003975637872339,0.12853614232541358,0.09318366795564983,0.049077045489847836,0.0,0.12378485650879235,0.035414168496874204,0.17078181015212868,0.0,0.04231904637592805,0.3108318424172758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922497876276325,0.07238261260009297,0.0,0.052072261510572315,0.0,0.0,0.046039308825160816,0.05870907891813443,0.2638984248808373,0.1886477231264405,0.0,0.08551778985429218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05138512635014442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11360125748325413,0.0,0.0,0.10298203822453213
mentalhealth,Mikashu_215,2020/01/16,"I'm worse than onision I've done similar if not worse stuff than onision, Sometimes in just a different person and do stuff I can't control and then regret it, I recently watched Jaclyn Glenn's interview w/ Chris Hansen in which she talked about most stuff of what onision has done and I just noticed I'm like him, I just want to apologize to a bunch of people and delete all my accounts and start scratch, I just feel like a piece of shit and I can't stop thinking about how much damage I have done to other people",7.7194230769230785,6.183060557692308,7.498923076923081,78.34607692307695,63.615384615384606,11.396923076923079,35.223076923076924,10.355215969177356,3.3207407692307687,414,15,84,8,5,132,66,104,0.153,0.754,0.09300000000000001,-0.8486,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,7,5,1,0,3,0,8,1,1,2,1,21,14,9,0,3,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,2,2,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,3,3,10,2,12,11,5,6,0,2,1,0,6,2,1,2,6,59,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828420813640444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607662047389127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48800573844431294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037362297544738,0.11355917769295007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15531708456953294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116851957646479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18097402058827894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22040205307713956,0.13879544519480436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695122722588858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16316745718110418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721290457217088,0.0,0.11251084543143908,0.0,0.0,0.13289547990049175,0.0,0.0,0.5459044791611585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776391371214688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185346499962628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375717593305316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239822825692106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,austonp_34,2020/01/16,"My girlfriend tried to kill herself, and now she’s at the hospital for the next two weeks, and I don’t know what to do I’m 19, my girlfriend is 17, in case that matters. 
I woke up this morning to a call from her letting me know she was on the way to the hospital because she had tried to kill herself. She’s in safe hands now but aside from that and maybe her sister, she has had no body she felt comfortable going to for support. I knew before this that she had been diagnosed with depression and was struggling with trauma from things like sexual assault and harassment, but I had no idea it was this bad. She tells me everything, and has no friends at school so I can’t believe and am so ashamed of myself for not having done more for her before she got to this point. Moving forward, I am going to do my very best to be better, but I have no idea where to even start. How do I go about this without having her think I see her as fragile or something?",3.5448979591836722,4.525250224489799,4.2587755102040825,89.46479591836737,72.26530612244899,7.2326530612244895,26.755102040816325,7.447530270364453,1.223861224489796,748,25,161,8,14,239,111,196,0.21100000000000002,0.67,0.11900000000000001,-0.975,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,8,16,4,2,5,0,24,3,2,1,0,25,38,15,2,0,6,1,3,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,11,9,0,1,7,0,0,5,8,9,0,1,13,4,31,7,29,23,2,19,0,1,1,0,22,9,0,1,7,126,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101653376867098,0.08835239069742505,0.0,0.2466618167275356,0.16329462676950202,0.15210268191218515,0.1281852025312242,0.0,0.16099258976921338,0.0,0.0,0.14799711770198865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483422459489475,0.14710823845796753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14832110834165585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572967407335592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302602375256222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916247085623354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119781450603924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24711350519947345,0.0,0.11591954381812668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32723298372968485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32070314350539386,0.0,0.15930742333233094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14820813839228333,0.0,0.07080900995504355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456089293261714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15404533905741233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15414238933835706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370125310528947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14668421549947291,0.11549620794013675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157976133865594,0.0,0.0,0.10258731801830256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15151986298252584,0.0,0.0,0.1644730520405437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668152817296588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628985599266524,0.09286992525133904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19680573170173413,0.0,0.14158261438519928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195883945466152,0.0,0.11504442761501248,0.1162599041483582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971431848970375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,farh14566,2020/01/16,"Effect of depression ? Hi, I space out very often (and sometimes in the worst moment like at work) and I realize it after a minute or two.
My memories has gone bad over this year and I have a hard time keeping track of everything and it's tiring. I am honestly exhausted everyday but I push myself all day long to do everything needed in the house i'm living at. Also those intense wave of wanting to kill myself it's terrible I had depression since I was a child and I don't know how long i can keep on",1.8740776699029096,3.9897595631067935,4.122145631067962,83.854286407767,79.58252427184465,8.003495145631069,23.89223300970874,8.841846274778883,1.9806551456310688,397,14,79,10,10,137,74,103,0.24100000000000002,0.71,0.049,-0.9707,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,2,4,9,1,0,5,0,8,2,0,2,1,18,15,9,1,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,6,0,2,3,0,0,2,1,7,0,1,3,1,12,2,13,12,2,18,0,2,0,0,2,8,0,2,9,56,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767639145990334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646283108669733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715802699782405,0.0,0.33964363204668563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3544064965199906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17662515913645116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275071500603269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505066520930629,0.218138857397557,0.0,0.10835921008076776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632706655889484,0.0,0.1741042957692257,0.34897763585447217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619869848362085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16310066190465008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19500569386313746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497113092177867,0.22661735491252985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19260596819704606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16268550073609195,0.11629568957604315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143541756608449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12697070445150593
mentalhealth,anonymouschic,2020/01/16,"Started taking Lamotrigine XR today. For those of you who take it, how's your experience been? Also, did you feel anything after the initial 1-3 days?",3.25416666666667,6.018497035714282,5.3285714285714265,73.48309523809526,78.64285714285714,6.590476190476192,27.190476190476193,7.793537801064563,2.1648190476190483,119,5,19,2,3,41,27,28,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,6,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,3,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,14,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3111439635675861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201764242951625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509218542688316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3805910187801692,0.0,0.0,0.19672853305726928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753900192047051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5850735124406778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687985864656693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Majesticalbeast,2020/01/16,I don't want to get better. I'm getting help for Body Dysmorphia and Social Anxiety. I have to start going out in public without wearing my hoodie etc. I would rather hide away forever than overcome social anxiety. They can't force me to do anything. I'm happy being isolated.. I don't want friends.,2.121305418719213,4.85735856896552,4.120738916256162,80.27672413793105,84.0,6.762561576354681,27.25123152709359,7.957251820313856,2.3831300492610845,239,11,40,5,7,81,43,58,0.17,0.6729999999999999,0.157,0.4943,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,7,2,2,0,0,7,15,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,7,3,9,13,1,5,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,1,26,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3582647458905264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19269438862005245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22000178200073706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20709620088814865,0.0,0.2600998637438428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611511923405471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18091205510917246,0.0,0.24467870929516106,0.0,0.13307898026814974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492685284067165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695304998200674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4773948990580067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16574022119066095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.276228216360265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225722657510694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663411156563509,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frozenember9,2020/01/16,"Trapped in a vicious cycle I tend to have very high, unrealistic expectations from myself but have little to no self-confidence, self-worth, or self-efficacy to actually pursue them. As a result, I begin to spiral out of control when things deviate - I really catastrophize the whole situation and that triggers severe self-loathing. Then when the reality of the situation reveals itself and I realize it wasn't as bad (might even be good), I feel elated for a while. Confidence shoots up a little and I actually become decisive and assertive about certain things; however, after I've had some time to think, I begin to regret taking these actions and decisions. I begin to second guess myself and all the past wounds open up again. I feel guilty about the things that I seem do be doing right because I think I don't deserve them. And then something  happens, and I actually feel relieved that things didn't work out!  Then I go into self-loathing mode, and the cycle resets. I'm sick of this - knowing that I'm not going to escape this cycle. What's the damn point of doing anything when I know I'll never meet these unattainable expectations that I dream up? Even if I do achieve realistic, I'll never be even know because I'm blinded by all the unrealistic dreams that I have for myself.",9.732090909090909,8.126471633333336,9.783257575757576,63.78204545454546,59.75,12.227272727272727,38.90151515151515,11.022393298168332,4.338333333333331,1032,41,172,21,11,343,129,240,0.111,0.77,0.11900000000000001,0.5937,1,1,1,1,0,0,31.0,0,0,2,3,9,7,2,0,12,0,15,3,0,3,5,44,36,21,0,4,4,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,17,13,0,1,13,2,0,3,7,4,0,1,3,4,23,3,28,29,4,32,0,1,1,0,3,13,1,6,16,127,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.3166920896596536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901951145211623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032232038335064,0.1318859942635991,0.11947173285833887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12132841971760007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143473959114292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16409088776603786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295766257496205,0.09073277477200414,0.0,0.0,0.1191679000924704,0.0,0.09565955128512534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142937300321012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17835186252947266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168412509739632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475748722424615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686377635057464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326609391271094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226114846380664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930022268862852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238158907324652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847923555485892,0.5642550450045153,0.12220792507218058,0.0,0.0,0.2431883867320025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327905814252409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133478027887027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874689251721977,0.1386294398179306,0.0,0.0,0.06307821095451882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925640943424737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207744788806542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787533107792958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lunamamagoddess28,2020/01/16,"Good enough? Let me start off by saying I'm not suicidal in anyway. 

Does anyone else feel like there not good enough at things? I do my best and try so hard but I fall short. It's a horrible cycle I seem stuck in. I feel like I'm going in circles.
Sorry I don't know how to get the words out of my head.",-1.0413235294117626,0.8654760441176492,1.4338235294117645,99.92220588235297,90.02941176470587,4.576470588235295,12.911764705882351,5.985473137389443,-1.1496823529411766,233,3,59,2,8,79,52,68,0.16399999999999998,0.6659999999999999,0.16899999999999998,0.0948,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,2,0,3,1,1,1,0,11,13,4,1,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,4,8,5,9,11,3,10,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,1,3,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178455174232127,0.20776630116709016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21279918737744927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17744921452973986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16939196370862708,0.0,0.0,0.4190402510411133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205057624703668,0.2897240957786809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594123725305836,0.0,0.11524134537570865,0.34015503598312896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18164600337105774,0.0,0.20810500035686727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143948877866404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073505280519044,0.0,0.1981306258115079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612543149472653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845981675195612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269893018294605,0.14352474022864598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22180224525611264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13471427886959084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13767048434271645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notasheep_,2020/01/16,"For those with Emotional Support Animals! How have they helped your mental health? I’m a college student who has dealt with anxiety and major depression for majority of my life. I want to look into getting an ESA as I had pets back home and I’ve worked at various humane societies in the past and just honestly miss the interaction! How have they helped you? What have they offered that other forms of support couldn’t? If anyone also has any insight to the process of getting an ESA animal certified and what my rights would be as an ESA owner renting a home, that would be awesome too.",5.535608108108107,7.069389081081084,6.0861148648648635,76.14106418918921,68.0990990990991,9.513963963963963,32.79391891891892,9.827888789773867,3.4005756756756766,472,21,82,11,8,153,77,111,0.059000000000000004,0.802,0.139,0.8599,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,3,1,6,5,0,0,8,0,11,2,0,2,0,16,19,10,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,4,1,7,7,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,9,3,14,13,4,6,0,2,1,0,12,4,0,1,2,62,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16082472805286485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367592589728935,0.0,0.1538458576300872,0.0,0.0,0.14061828188036754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546384201875162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17321266123941584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262176495849101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21013960378250116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137667158292526,0.0,0.0,0.2695947827310717,0.0,0.40345226451289184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14204740889872447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16887873932203956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20266796638674114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19197882954081852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717437802614486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4564263548487902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186177745229774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14640786586402058,0.0,0.0,0.28572045551047925,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anxietydude888,2020/01/16,"I am having major anxiety :’( 5 yrs GAD. 

A couple of days ago my anxiety levels went back to it’s peak because of this new thing I’m experiencing.

It all started last week due to poor sleep like 3-4 hours a day and poor diet plus I had fasted a day before and was going into ketosis so no sugar that week. 

I’ve been hearing melodies on repeat in my mind. Not externally, not a loud sound, hard to explain. I’m trying to keep calm and accept but it’s so annoying. I’m fearing of going crazy, trying not to add fuel to the fire but I need somebody to reassure me that this will stop. 

it started as my home doorbell now I have “jingle bells” added to the playlist.

It got so bad I went to the hospital but only saw an ER medical doctor and he had no answers for me...

Ever since I started sleeping again thanks to the prescribed mirtazapine (7.5) the sound feels like it’s coming from another room but it still on repeat non stop. The more I think about it the more it repeats, it stops when my mind is focused on something else.

I’ve never experienced this type of intrusive ocd thought before so idk...

You can check my last posts in /anxiety /ocd for more info.

IDK WHAT’S HAPPENING? AM I LOSING IT?",0.8205234159779664,3.2732544132231425,3.061785123966942,87.47873829201103,87.5123966942149,5.706005509641874,21.70303030303031,7.1686216300943375,0.9284574104683192,936,33,186,15,30,318,148,242,0.19,0.735,0.075,-0.9857,0,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,0,1,11,10,1,1,12,0,11,6,2,0,3,32,33,15,0,1,7,0,3,2,0,1,2,4,2,0,18,8,2,4,7,0,3,5,6,4,1,0,9,11,16,6,26,23,5,42,0,1,1,0,5,8,0,0,30,111,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059486007401376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532871698452355,0.27430086755069394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919046580508623,0.099795462442926,0.07285919876404699,0.0,0.2034079914600004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295719152719376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224826954128724,0.0,0.23124444466599334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12233532270179147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998448789465827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081140420409922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13449491963462026,0.0604336630479973,0.08538618550018398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585364885988324,0.0,0.0955922643067619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569247022291504,0.0,0.1070677901161266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470942024276505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988981252181966,0.0,0.1177046045099614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623620339278547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948519542508016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11678433803263814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337139892455248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204053397970257,0.0,0.0,0.2413652922069004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886236798937709,0.0921823512460832,0.11543461221465726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090148874411096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446856091204036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886942223852466,0.0,0.2392156396512049,0.0,0.0,0.09201349216750723,0.0,0.0,0.2537938046214241,0.0,0.09545002654879912,0.299775984542652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100393415815406,0.0,0.0,0.07940477559636111,0.07658455294392731,0.0,0.09488672256216216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622945096422643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917458802816787,0.0,0.0,0.2215952611081849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dinoEra,2020/01/16,"Hopefully this is the last post I ever make on this account. I'm too scared to be on Reddit again. In late November, I wrote something incredibly stupid. I violated the rules of this subreddit, and completely made a fool of myself. I was too into my head, my thoughts, that I completely ignored all the possible outcomes and consequences.

I'm sorry. I'm sorry to everyone, and to the person I wrote the post about. I had police at my house, and a detective- but sometimes if I think hard enough about it, I can hear his voice again. It rings in my ear.

It's painful to think about, and it honestly hurts to be here, typing this. 

I couldn't sleep that night, and thinking about how the person, the victim, read my exact thoughts, the pure disgust or horror that could've been on their face scares me. I'm scared, and it was my fault to begin with.


So they probably searched through my comment history, saw the posts I made about this person and probably thoroughly looked through it. I deleted them, but I'm still not sure.

So at school, right after Thanksgiving break, I got called into my vice principle's office and boom. There's a packet with all of my posts on it, and she said it was confusing to understand how to read it.

Plus, she asked me what Reddit was. 

I panicked, but I can't remember if it was that lengthy to contain all my shit in there.

I totally forgot I had a comment history, and I tried deleting everything on it but I'm not sure of that either.

I didn't want to face any of the school VP's or the counselor. 

The detective basically sifted through my things in my room, asked me who one of my OC's was (fucking embarrassing) and almost looked through everything. 

I couldn't sit at my desk for a week without being so scared and disgusted at myself. 

They had my email, they had all my shit. They wanted to take my phone to plug it in their car and look through it but my mom said no.


I remember the comment that guy made on my post, and I still think about it. I made a return on here to fight my fear. I can't stand being so scared anymore, so scared of him and those police still watching every single move I make, despite knowing that it's been over for months.

My biggest fear, despite having anxiety (It gets bad in front of people, with them staring at me), is having my privacy invaded. There should be nothing to be afraid of, but I'll never stop being scared.

I always instinctively whack myself in the head a little when I remember something painful and embarrassing, when it's stupid voice rings in my head over and over again.


So, if that detective is even reading this, it's my fault but I hate your scrutinizing gaze, you're matter-of-fact tone, that ""cut the crap"" look.

I don't hate you, but I don't like you because I can't stand to be watched by you anymore. Leave me alone, all of you. All your police officers, everytime I see one in a video or in a movie, I flinch!


It's not your fault, but I really, really despise you.

Plus, my mom let you in late at night without the warrant so stop. You were doing your job, yet I feel obligated to despise you.

Sorry for anyone who read this, but it'd be a God send if you could reply. At least let me know I've been heard, and that you know it's absolutely terrifying to be on this site.",4.320637606837604,5.2812750876923085,5.0928717948717965,84.27635042735048,70.43076923076923,8.547008547008549,27.982905982905983,8.841846274778883,1.9894803418803424,2557,88,526,45,45,829,260,650,0.237,0.742,0.021,-0.9994,1,1,2,0,1,0,94.0,0,14,8,0,33,43,16,13,26,0,44,13,10,8,13,100,92,49,0,11,23,2,2,1,0,1,2,10,1,4,44,26,0,5,14,5,1,4,15,38,0,2,29,21,95,5,81,46,11,72,0,1,9,1,50,36,4,10,24,370,139,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05880983583771576,0.060826800022399326,0.0,0.0,0.04886825120216007,0.0,0.0,0.03993856630933475,0.0,0.044928460657962216,0.0,0.11648920198083045,0.041065538211909496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098096630064122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04903728393110002,0.03580139947573622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05997012520297165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231550450855668,0.0,0.0,0.09378260998800476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06068402103753499,0.0,0.03879075909693668,0.053124850035492006,0.0494827467884785,0.056119245922479404,0.10556587688566076,0.0,0.0,0.1321756600944707,0.029695765933004492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05429514578178477,0.030684118073308037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04697192529277889,0.0,0.0,0.05815215537693282,0.0,0.0,0.052610744970520366,0.11596787461650565,0.1808224606819452,0.0,0.06619323090382245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05833236417225447,0.0,0.06776679330008081,0.06287191954886981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058280685162183564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968297856540721,0.04787297123148697,0.13250050170743186,0.06218682730982365,0.0,0.12011126640157738,0.0,0.028692620899909375,0.0588631134965019,0.0,0.0,0.1972743865184876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222878321905042,0.07840576122197968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756825721797014,0.04687790452958842,0.062420933688785624,0.0,0.0,0.04529636940232446,0.0,0.0,0.11022867358085757,0.0,0.05635323395318136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959423955305403,0.0,0.12498619838748065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0407161425417624,0.15384289896939746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620950325486454,0.2812366006038801,0.0,0.12664222968358105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23498446919048785,0.0,0.07524817081863086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995896852777592,0.05015529045493888,0.11173178434342453,0.0,0.4115943990157915,0.11887624442141233,0.04680038475198885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057146205326034,0.0,0.0,0.058772638330348036,0.0,0.0,0.09042679156861684,0.05808569332813473,0.1972310325792005,0.0,0.0,0.1407060984094758,0.09820219416722988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070508227504697,0.0,0.044157819430243474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039017751219209404,0.15052782463313025,0.0,0.09325047535569764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03987396698691535,0.0,0.0,0.061140234484164925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928121560223774,0.0,0.047109843192364005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322768041127608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aldigiano,2020/01/16,"Did you ever get psychological help? How did you decide to get help? I've been thinking of getting professional help. I know I have some issues and it would maybe help but it's very difficult for me to reach out. The only experience with professional help I can think back on is my parent forcing me to see a psychologist when I was 8. It went terribly with a lot of screaming and holding me back. I remember being insulted and feeling quite powerless. I'm not sure how to deal with that and it still scares me to talk about it. 

So here's my question : Do you have good experience with professional help? Did you have to go through the fear of reaching out?",3.111302083333332,5.4041558593750025,4.6106250000000015,81.00520833333336,76.34375,8.016666666666666,27.072916666666664,8.841846274778883,2.2446385416666668,522,21,102,12,12,174,79,128,0.207,0.6409999999999999,0.152,-0.9386,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,4,0,1,10,8,1,2,4,0,13,0,0,2,2,27,24,9,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,1,7,0,0,2,1,6,0,0,6,3,15,2,19,16,2,10,0,0,1,0,15,3,0,3,5,74,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283582806482841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15308599417353372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343171133978537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905021438488576,0.0,0.16709179520962736,0.07508067425309854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327386617004393,0.0,0.08438991649441098,0.12454581725067396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5971756661271032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15498429705614536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160586047959856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624033077953833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14917750501038635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129328377811192,0.0,0.0,0.16487984468808006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634204937426633,0.15793669593413145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16820948120377088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866373815533704,0.0,0.1183267826939072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858378243708795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994945001936038,0.0,0.0,0.11935011054127855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19029195261043289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225192603861503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765111012781225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548257006133864,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExistingLyric1,2020/01/16,"Suicide could be my final resort eventhough i don't want it. throughout my life I've had some rough times and i always got through them, but latley everything got Sosososososo bad and just insane thoughts have gotten into me and i dont know what to do. iI don't know what to call these feelings but all i know is that Now its way way too much for me. Never saw myself as suicidal or wanting to kill myself. I've always seen a problem and found a way to solve it but life has thrown so much at me so fast and without relief i just can't take it anymore and i see absolutely no way to continue. 

I don't want to bore you all with the story. i wrote it down but it was way too long so ill just tell you what ended up happening in the very end. I'm 19 Syrian and I'm a medical student in europe. I'm one of the top in my year and academically things are perfect. My family lives in Saudi arabia and i haven't seen them in 2 years now. There is absolutely and utterly 0 chance of me seeing them in the next lets say 10 years? i got declined my residency in poland and i got banned from going to Saudi arabia thats why. my family isnt doing good financially at all and they are going through hell to get me through medschool. 

i started feeling weird at the start of my second year once everyone came back from the summer holidays  and seeing their families and just having an absolutely wonderful time. while i on the other hand suffered here hopping from one lawyer to the other from court to court just to fix my legal stay. Didn't think of it much at the time and always kept saying I've gone through worse It's Okay you'll get through it and you'll feel proud. i kept pushing but i don't know last few days something snapped and i can't take it anymore. i don't know what I'm feeling because its not anxiety and its not depression. i just feel like my guts have been cut out and replaced with fire. I see no way out of this and i know there will be no break. people here don't give me a break either because they themselves are going through shit too and i understand that. started thinking about how good it would be to end it all. my family wouldn't be forced to pay for me, i wouldn't have to go through hell everyday and order will be restored to everyone's life (people i know that is). never wanted to kill myself and im not doing this for attention but i trully think its the most sane choice. only thing stopping me is the thought of my mother getting news that her son who she hasn't seen in 2 years killed himself 

i can't see professional help so im resorting to this. any and all help is welcome. thanks for reading my rambling,  knowing that someone listened is good i guess.",3.038804652697575,4.566241934664248,4.177711186272891,87.41481294340868,74.29945553539021,7.041758785678931,25.408389704669197,7.686295010490155,1.2443172413793104,2130,71,443,28,44,695,249,551,0.19,0.708,0.102,-0.996,0,0,1,0,0,5,32.0,0,4,6,3,23,23,7,0,16,1,48,8,3,1,8,97,113,38,5,9,18,2,8,1,0,7,5,3,0,0,34,30,0,4,22,2,1,7,25,13,0,3,21,20,62,10,61,78,12,66,2,2,9,0,26,19,3,5,31,295,96,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16287062285621168,0.0,0.0,0.04436976981146085,0.0,0.04991329538314273,0.0,0.12941373602091902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0501704320369855,0.054477994611779976,0.07954716458088255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666238399799149,0.07462446682464295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520939182600705,0.0,0.0,0.042078511728335696,0.0,0.0561966039107211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646826112032859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17336675621068648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246914075126023,0.05863923132697702,0.0,0.24603388796751705,0.0,0.16495262857175622,0.04661202062428242,0.0,0.07147421043548502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153927831353417,0.0,0.0,0.10226560802675748,0.06259026457170487,0.14832406543157395,0.16417668171594826,0.20873393368200246,0.0,0.07187623382106369,0.0,0.05769715057538501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874665345658195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14095455446555738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21655632804602865,0.0,0.2868615941853079,0.053184500847625577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667188351319891,0.13825632463539614,0.03187608124828793,0.0,0.057613741141205,0.05774098533111305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572885472065737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389077053373892,0.0,0.10064404756593837,0.0,0.06939025597835984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948525592002422,0.08842525943305711,0.049622805413989904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046723701578548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062431965526390326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526402779769643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103773066356458,0.0,0.0,0.2599645518632709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697446242435684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055283038587845605,0.05022984420137677,0.0,0.0,0.13854515207619192,0.06954395039649867,0.0,0.05454888786483522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427378803630848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811430226718078,0.0,0.057028204281665884,0.06007009247731504,0.0,0.0,0.08669357967176383,0.1254217204016953,0.0,0.10359666128963067,0.11413705123770602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792377345921621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05383508939526841,0.15393600084292464,0.31073719495418944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058874701586885125,0.0,0.0,0.06289517351753003,0.0707569063458254,0.0,0.0,0.06649162640931865,0.04634915009278615,0.0,0.0,0.21008261934219707
mentalhealth,just_a_smalltowngirl,2020/01/16,"Warning: long but need this off my chest I've always struggled with my my mental health since I was 12. I hate listing all of these things that I've been diagnosed with because I don't see the point in putting labels on all of it. But one struggle I will label as anxiety.

 Some background info: recent college grad with a horrible family background. Lots of fighting, animosity, parents holding money and their love/acceptance over my head. Usually having to do with who I'm dating. 

Current situation on that: dating a guy who is 15 years older than me. I will admit our relationship is questionable in the sense that we have had our ups and downs, moments where I question if this is what I want and how I want to be treated. I could make a separate post about this but I'm going to spare everyone those details lol.  But at the same time, he's my best friend, no one has ever made me laugh like he does and he provides a huge sense of support that I feel I don't have anywhere else. Sometimes I feel like I would fucking crumble apart without him. I'm a mess. Mom hasn't spoken to me and has cut me off completely due to his age so I spent Christmas alone while my boyfriend had to work. This aspect has sent me into a deep depressive hole. 

I've always had issues making and keeping satisfying friendships. I'm not gonna be stupid and try and say that everyone else is the problem, when most of the evidence points to myself. However sometimes I don't think I'm the best at picking em. Im extremely afraid to put myself out there or hangout with a friend one on one. I feel like I'm uninteresting and awkward. This causes me to only ask friends to do surface level things like go out for a drink or things like that. So that hopefully they won't notice how awkward and stupid I am. I often feel that my friends don't care about me. I think they only care about what I can give them or do for them. I get jealous really easily in friendships too, or my feelings hurt very easily, but I don't dare express it. I just hide it and distance myself. Maybe I'm afraid of caring too much because I feel like I'm always the one that loves more than others. If you haven't gathered by reading this I'm very afraid of being alone. Terrified. When I'm alone these thoughts of all of the things that are wrong with me keep circling around my head. Everything I ever said or did wrong or embarrassing. I just feel like I'm a mistake. 

These types of relationship issues whether it's a bf, parents, or friends have been prominent throughout my life. I've been on meds, seen multiple therapists. I have one right now but I feel we've gotten to the point that he thinks I'm fine. And Everytime I go in there I have a hard time telling him that I'm struggling way more than he thinks I am. Just really want to learn how to be happy. How to love myself. How to have happy and healthy relationships. I understand I should make some changes. I'm not sure what. 

If you have some helpful advice please let me know. Keep in mind I'm a sensitive Sally so anything you say I will take to heart lol.",3.360878048780485,5.064551014634149,4.287975609756098,86.22757317073173,73.8130081300813,7.2614634146341475,26.77154471544716,7.9765259561132025,1.5858364227642276,2434,89,490,36,50,786,283,615,0.14,0.647,0.214,0.9958,4,3,1,0,2,0,57.0,3,3,5,3,26,50,7,9,21,2,49,11,4,11,6,106,114,42,0,13,23,3,9,7,6,7,3,3,0,1,36,24,1,4,20,3,2,6,12,23,0,6,15,14,71,27,63,86,14,57,0,2,2,3,50,30,1,19,26,316,107,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05859730306290562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18631759948062526,0.0,0.0,0.14968755961927538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04587321671296556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049346253294155415,0.053381744671269694,0.056059370769674384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310846322026601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585956348779245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341556498819386,0.061600782394875375,0.06343523443231393,0.0,0.06287237521350561,0.0,0.0,0.047877335756492834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05164794209520055,0.06086341951704473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05247595387277177,0.0,0.0,0.05874307065302236,0.0,0.0,0.10018646628049603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848391967286487,0.0,0.11459864381148688,0.05389285852387584,0.0,0.05652985729970032,0.0,0.24256167002433,0.1713566140735383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316448382154502,0.055436864571688164,0.031329343970604794,0.05752408749572097,0.10223882151631036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059374979397593265,0.0,0.12766814881436744,0.05371704416575728,0.05920322403792622,0.12308319795453228,0.0637402074538305,0.0,0.0710590551280759,0.040193412040522514,0.0,0.0,0.0595589776250043,0.0,0.0,0.0641939908109074,0.0,0.06477271009701559,0.12517618646696566,0.0,0.15989948490007413,0.0,0.0,0.03295530773834085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06131848356941023,0.042355196768405365,0.2050717870432699,0.0,0.0,0.05306731829629675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05098027182581697,0.1623628126624682,0.056740525656776536,0.12008171735937813,0.0,0.060243107006808815,0.0,0.06660782314417289,0.0,0.06043082138219887,0.0,0.06054776159803321,0.07023052185370783,0.0,0.0,0.044081324418150096,0.04446343874121469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827078188064299,0.0,0.0,0.2438038437095131,0.09121247912755832,0.0,0.0,0.13316852465280818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582378647061947,0.17005949994324324,0.0,0.057430089249377314,0.0,0.0,0.05737860148131482,0.0,0.12056318447576045,0.13434950369344362,0.0,0.05998143115463099,0.0,0.0768304899982271,0.0,0.059208404416317965,0.1931405623291787,0.0,0.05120995633161983,0.05704064063013816,0.09537347364859604,0.0,0.0,0.047784503642852576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049603836179577525,0.0674034014235715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186142395685291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18806595230570106,0.0,0.0,0.068047802560375,0.0565164948460116,0.0,0.04508637043491881,0.0,0.052412231123646805,0.0,0.0,0.06962422333529653,0.15935286730231374,0.15369312501702911,0.0,0.04760567357453943,0.06993238503175042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040712437105771215,0.0,0.0,0.06242589185785024,0.0,0.0,0.06604320007618061,0.09895514626449924,0.10610709239475953,0.04759758756156565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780431652171876,0.0,0.043655382489476535,0.0,0.0,0.04259756023614953,0.1311250735424284,0.0,0.03861562515852971
mentalhealth,TheBruceDog02,2020/01/16,"My life’s just a bit fucked tbh Dealt with depression,anxiety,body image concerns and just about everything else for years and now it’s all just built up. I have tried therapy which made me worse cus I felt vulnerable and ashamed. Antidepressants caused weight gain which didn’t help as I was talking them for body image concerns. I have tried the whole having a routine thing and keeping busy but again nothing. It’s gotten to the point now where I’m at my wits end and as edgy teenager as this sounds I’m just numb to everything. Nothing excites me anymore I don’t have any friends however I understand this because who would want to be friends with a hateful piece of shit who just complains about everything. I’ve come to terms with the fact that depression is something that will stick with me for the rest of my life and I’m ok with that but I simply want to get them small good moments back I enjoyed art and skateboarding but get nothing out of doing it anymore. I don’t know if I’m posting this for help or just to talk shit but I just wanted to write it all down.",3.5920187793427227,5.549525690140847,3.7057511737089217,89.57064553990612,73.78873239436619,6.986854460093897,27.795774647887324,7.793537801064563,1.5773830985915491,864,34,175,12,18,265,119,213,0.16,0.7120000000000001,0.128,-0.853,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,1,14,14,4,1,7,1,13,8,3,2,3,41,31,16,0,5,13,0,2,0,2,2,3,1,0,0,15,14,1,1,3,1,0,1,3,8,0,0,5,3,18,6,28,23,7,17,0,1,0,1,12,7,3,2,8,111,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404095487455226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451230645391348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502801192734582,0.0,0.07533529807961413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492107303793613,0.2745466114303162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695420199638266,0.0,0.10645616263582187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644220768853484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323807899017842,0.0,0.10945821744069806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33320639354923803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11865945155183567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19096046796100527,0.1142508687270456,0.12913445927885475,0.0,0.0,0.10365589873595862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122013029236675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567070588184066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098466107946183,0.0,0.0,0.06791820871116618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17458123085722366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693760818548635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3557448373343941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682626566224913,0.0,0.11835874266172106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537131834701962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514054474074156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19866332319281949,0.0,0.0,0.14132839674068512,0.0,0.08210332449399091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678100427672842,0.0,0.0,0.1286546854863513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186780868266014,0.0,0.0,0.150491296626013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379764609227407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12594205014689375,0.08779010682213505,0.0,0.0,0.07958366251205948
mentalhealth,loxsey,2020/01/16,"Does exercise really help to make you feel better? As in feeling happier, aid in the treatment of depression and anxiety? I heard exercise does something with the brain chemicals so would you recommend joining a gym?",5.599324324324325,8.969592108108113,6.514797297297302,64.83003378378382,73.86486486486487,12.348648648648648,38.979729729729726,11.20814326018867,6.5902486486486485,176,11,24,8,4,58,32,37,0.114,0.59,0.297,0.8270000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,1,3,1,1,0,6,5,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,3,1,6,3,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243824188317063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818868653101014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3558031444946107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745178660220195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.557837787537401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223144491946953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136350308240706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127517926205947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041837612896812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453705149636243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264134999264349,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thrawyhelpMentalHelp,2020/01/16,"How do you get someone committed when they NEED to ASAP but the police or crises centers wont do anything? So my sister has been going down hill, she attacked my mom, is accusing her of stealing, accusing her of raping everyone in the house, drugging people. She stalked my mom waiting for her to drive up and ran after her while my mom was driving.

  
The cops won't do anything and she has an 8 year old son, no one is helping and it's reaching a boiling point, she says her son and husband were kidnapped by her and replaced with clones.  


Shit is hitting the literal fan and NO ONE can help us.",4.625338983050849,5.5133657288135645,5.262500000000003,83.60442796610172,69.67796610169492,7.594915254237289,33.39406779661017,7.645422480735847,2.335183050847457,468,22,90,5,8,151,84,118,0.218,0.6920000000000001,0.09,-0.9698,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,1,1,1,0,3,4,3,0,6,0,14,4,1,1,1,13,20,12,0,1,2,7,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,7,1,1,0,0,0,4,4,4,0,2,4,1,17,0,11,13,0,14,0,0,0,1,23,5,1,1,5,65,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934401282835115,0.0,0.0,0.20283418803195646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20676344016258827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17036673757530268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315080781281307,0.0,0.10132810125240206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390122693817545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20572634754256455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6264443184568239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220210550102118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18708866018516665,0.0,0.2416320942938613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360601532445865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685446484379986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178586252263076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830153479171236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106720046461786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21446469693070372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148149377493777
mentalhealth,depth-first-search,2020/01/16,"How valuable is a good therapist? College student in therapy here, I have a personality disorder and I go to therapy nearly every week.

The problem is that the therapist I go to is kind of far away and the only way I can get there is by taking two Uber's. There's a good bus system at my university but unfortunately, there is no bus that takes me there.

Because of this, going to therapy is kind of expensive, even with insurance. Thanks to insurance, I only have to pay $25, but each Uber trip is roughly $10, which means every week, going to therapy costs me $45. 

For me, spending that much every week seems like a lot. I like this therapist and I feel like she helps a lot, but she is the first real therapist I've been to. 

Basically, I'm asking for advice. Should I stay with this therapist and keep going every week at this cost, or find someone else who's closer?

I can probably find someone nearby (go there by bike or bus or something) and I'll only have to pay $25 every week. I can also tell my current therapist to do calls (she doesn't do any video or Skype) and pay $25 a week that way but I wonder whether calling a therapist is the same as being there in person.

Any advice?",4.271838842975207,4.887727619834717,6.107097107438017,78.21700929752069,70.32231404958678,9.355785123966943,28.76136363636364,9.516144504307137,2.508404132231405,932,33,186,20,16,324,116,242,0.061,0.8390000000000001,0.1,0.902,1,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,1,10,10,0,0,12,0,21,0,0,1,0,32,38,18,0,2,9,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,10,9,0,1,6,2,7,7,2,1,0,2,1,2,19,9,25,35,5,27,0,0,0,0,11,8,0,8,11,120,29,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805120685153124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056488337999157534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607108731234087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06603600665531424,0.0,0.06636573341236189,0.0,0.0,0.04305962497874577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442564334904557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095605666593236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900810215345983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04665503482585901,0.0,0.2975733561860021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03571616091148607,0.05046304637401309,0.0,0.0,0.12912177287459578,0.06008374784627081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036904887417477945,0.0,0.24086761607873006,0.11849383330741813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0473464540997585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627853607349361,0.0,0.147115012985036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035289273910721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010600630574765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769443391322314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051926280881959566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16116773509987806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335490850955726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615857196229124,0.06759001496574839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040030581706516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06430522019965809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970090558577905,0.05437976992512219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528958296354922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622038090070256,0.0,0.061739801852597774,0.06503300697491851,0.3231180027227135,0.5741045482122172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900202960908372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213663535063284,0.3399641707378812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660275178782935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Balance_Better,2020/01/16,"Blog with practical advice and tips for looking after yourself Hi All, I have suffered from anxiety and depression for a few years now and have created a blog detailing my experiences/offering practical support for those going through similar.  I hope that it will be useful to you. Do let me know if you'd like to see any topics covered in the future or if you have any feedback! Thanks a lot [https://www.balancebetter.org/](https://www.balancebetter.org/)",7.665542857142856,11.072165573333333,6.5245714285714325,67.36800000000002,66.6,9.619047619047619,33.38095238095238,9.957137785484203,4.125495238095239,378,17,53,10,7,114,59,75,0.10300000000000001,0.7040000000000001,0.193,0.7644,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,3,0,0,1,6,0,0,4,0,8,0,0,1,1,12,16,6,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,7,4,10,12,3,6,0,2,2,0,4,1,0,5,5,41,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27765351017328976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.386443193461154,0.0,0.2173625572771085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24472512669336774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16148051295984234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822102440817499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15615320832374147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.290547368421937,0.0,0.1388140470973747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23860190462218744,0.0,0.0,0.2415614829035898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226418870405748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3224331198346148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615934054546786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454014796559995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829736747660844
mentalhealth,Marvel6994,2020/01/16,"Misdiagnosis I was diagnosed with Depression 2 years ago, but I've come to realise I could be Bipolar instead... 

I'm fairly sure my colleagues have noticed my mood swings. They haven't said anything but I myself am worried",4.373048780487803,7.126612097560978,5.1001829268292695,76.75320121951222,74.36585365853658,7.0268292682926825,34.640243902439025,8.07648339933343,3.105141463414634,180,10,29,3,4,58,34,41,0.132,0.7929999999999999,0.075,-0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,1,6,9,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,1,7,1,2,5,0,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,18,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930505719388272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720497075225768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28477642603569797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639514516304072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847390957401517,0.3355447348704189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3763820959668758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144694594709472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31157980326096474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357330375515892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21289092542763988
mentalhealth,anonymousmillennials,2020/01/16,"Anonymous Millennials With the world becoming so consumed by social media and technology in general, it seems that nearly everyone is going through some kind of mental illness.

I wish there was a way where we could connect more people together and focus more on the reality that we aren't as different as we may think. Mental health is something so personal and vulnerable to be able to share with our peers. 

I am determined to help with this stigma and emphasize that generating awareness is one of the most important parts of improving mental health among millennials. We have created a google form that asks a few questions regarding mental health and anxiety among this younger generation.

We will keep anonymity for every submission and want to be able to share these stories with those who may benefit from reading about other people's situations. We strive to create a community of people to help normalize talking about mental health and realize we are all humans who experience these things. Share this if you think someone can benefit from this in order to share their story! 

Check it out here: [https://forms.gle/YNyZYLRA6GmSiUwcA](https://forms.gle/YNyZYLRA6GmSiUwcA)

Thank you so much and whoever is reading this I hope you are having a great day!",10.645714285714282,11.62775638095238,9.665476190476193,56.93535714285717,56.61904761904761,12.714285714285715,38.92857142857143,12.161744961471696,5.321142857142858,1040,45,146,30,12,328,131,210,0.027999999999999997,0.772,0.19899999999999998,0.9878,1,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,8,3,1,0,8,10,0,0,8,0,18,5,0,0,1,38,28,14,0,6,1,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,18,20,0,1,5,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,15,10,32,21,9,13,0,0,0,0,26,9,0,8,1,116,33,2,0.21710308837597825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304163418516945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148104043443552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988665209394378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866695751145677,0.0,0.0,0.07000676575606223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341325965800254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145935776809176,0.10372565234585243,0.0,0.10618423962409712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616923441333517,0.0,0.0,0.11967846068787348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4615408614911253,0.0,0.0,0.1455196238017241,0.0,0.0,0.10781617655734184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648560011646196,0.0,0.11303972891011806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5469721247291031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979787507892756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635746562909988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355733567782607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755074408483368,0.0,0.2257679184776417,0.0947830213567061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160257267850072,0.0,0.21716183955497412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988212489178678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201648379871174,0.0,0.1106546290813516,0.09197537112740778,0.08356828206453219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.087249619358893,0.0,0.09993967752838866,0.0,0.0,0.07211682252236985,0.13911089279283467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402651323560643,0.08616316311794531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482891863412512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,radishS,2020/01/16,Is there anyone willing to talk to me on the phone? Please,2.625,4.27301816666667,2.8566666666666656,95.955,75.66666666666666,4.800000000000002,20.333333333333336,3.1291,-0.5127666666666664,46,1,10,0,1,14,11,12,0.0,0.8270000000000001,0.17300000000000001,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4571071514113942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7176054067385702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5254479349546746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sockiastobias,2020/01/16,"If I tell my therapist about a recent suicide attempt, will I get hospitalized? i was sent to a mental hospital a few months back for suicidal thoughts and then about a month ago I actually attempted it. I feel like that's a lot more severe and I just want to know if I'll get sent to the mental hospital. I plan on telling her either way",3.7639130434782615,4.8928723478260885,5.525333333333336,80.028,71.89855072463769,9.577971014492757,29.74202898550725,9.888512548439397,2.8565628985507248,268,11,55,7,5,92,49,69,0.18100000000000002,0.7609999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.8777,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,11,10,5,2,3,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,9,1,7,5,4,10,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,3,7,37,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.19474043621378292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689668482738274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534482684605454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090283940027374,0.1425647251546596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20852229540568615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967220414585256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749426652837212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696576109525215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40221632472388696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185715891512519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19704007220487696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254444498084637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4365695031148447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3488460770672562,0.0,0.0,0.23170295042462566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584272613146765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770485036721605,0.1584003518143123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raidragun,2020/01/16,"I finally got insurance, and I want to get help, but I don't know where to start I don't know what's up with me, I could have depression, ptsd, alot of things. I've had quite a bit of trauma, been through abuse, and am overall pretty depressed/anxious lately. I know I need help, I just don't know what kind of doctor to look for, or how to find someone who isn't gonna critisize me over my sexuality, lifestyle choices ECT.",5.086022727272726,4.634358284090915,5.889909090909092,84.18236363636366,68.43181818181819,8.85818181818182,31.236363636363638,8.238735603445708,2.003288181818182,331,12,73,4,5,109,63,88,0.166,0.713,0.121,-0.7961,0,0,0,0,1,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,9,1,0,1,0,16,20,5,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,1,11,1,12,15,2,6,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,2,3,45,15,1,0.0,0.2431076381746877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22400608127087013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16382148145216627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17672333379252458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100129203302332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.224767332353648,0.18753303177531008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719935562606868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410313999808165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750589271961641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136659355780572,0.451051609293016,0.0,0.2314547279676171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17230157198738388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214017843621574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20874430457257684,0.0,0.0,0.23984729079293496,0.0,0.0,0.21823677995932994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17385041446536573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452291861776004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631409508608286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102191843687447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImJustVenting2,2020/01/16,"I’m seeing things... Recently I’ve started seeing things, mor specifically creatures/shadows. The shadows are walking around in my apartment, and they are scaring me. They kinda look like demons. Long fingers, about 170-190 cm tall, skinny, dark skinned & very deep, dark eyes. Some are also light skinned with larger heads. I’m so scared of them. Most of the time I see them in the dark, but sometimes they just appear in front of me. This doesn’t happen that often though. I can’t hear them. I don’t know if this is because I’m sleep deprived or something like that, but I’ve had this for about 1-2 weeks now so I don’t really know. I kinda saw things before that, but they weren’t as clear as they are now. I’m scared of them.

I sound crazy, I know, but if anyone has any advice I would appreciate it.",2.3671014492753635,4.450729726708076,2.9612173913043485,92.9493623188406,77.81987577639751,5.2871221532091095,21.292339544513453,6.079149491110277,0.08886799171842652,630,17,132,4,15,196,97,161,0.106,0.8220000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.7422,1,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,9,0,11,6,0,3,3,0,13,7,7,0,1,22,29,14,0,3,8,0,3,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,10,3,1,0,3,0,0,3,5,4,0,0,3,12,20,2,14,25,2,17,1,1,6,0,10,7,0,9,9,78,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541681790918334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616628869633878,0.0,0.1709405812803494,0.0,0.10728703451498907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031442093823933,0.0,0.0,0.14044616292118384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617335663700252,0.0,0.1342481775626678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395129208806244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16191455505280886,0.0,0.17781498198089254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601140079762785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15415406677202528,0.0,0.0,0.13961891423985825,0.13248462495751526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106964077377666,0.0,0.1557759729316795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4738571537026816,0.0,0.3771598450964801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15788103228961528,0.0,0.0,0.12145681736495363,0.15603569083214955,0.0,0.11166836170846642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144403423996346,0.0,0.15500536959461567,0.0,0.0919952616959172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017437590076872,0.0,0.0,0.12655124706851473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207321757303106,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,finebutnot,2020/01/16,"This is an experiment Hi Reddit,

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I'm not sure what I'm trying to accomplish by writing this. I guess it's just cause I've never tried writing about my life experiences on the internet so I'm interested in seeing what happens. I guess I haven't before because I often feel like my experiences are somehow ""not real"", invalid, or would offend someone. Also, my apologies if this is a bit ""stream of consciousness"", I have a very hard time expressing the way I feel and organizing those thoughts in a way that make sense.

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It's hard for me to quantify the level of success that I've had in my career as I feel largely dissociated from it. Or at least, ashamed or scared of it. Talking about it often makes me feel like I'm actually talking about someone else's experiences. In the past, I've had people described me as ""one of the best if not the best in my city and/or country"". Some might refer to me as being fairly recognizable in my field, and it's possible that I've gotten work just based on who I know or who I've worked with (I work in an industry that is very reputation based). I certainly don't identify with any of these descriptions in case anyone was wondering. I have delusions (I think) about how others might think of me in a professional setting. I'm constantly in fear that someone will somehow find out that I know nothing about what I'm doing and that if that ""secret"" gets out, my life will be over and everyone will hate me for deceiving them. On bad days, I will try and find places at work to hide from people. On the worst days, I can't go into work. Sometimes I've even believed that someone is watching me in secret while I work trying to catch me making a mistake or not doing my job. Sometimes I'll believe that person is someone who has nothing to do with my job or even doesn't work at my company (like a construction worker, for example). I know these experiences are ridiculous, even when they are happening, but I can't shake the anxiety and feelings that come with it. I'm also deeply afraid that these same people will find out that I struggle with these issues and will think I'm unstable and not fit to be working, leading to the same disaster scenario, which is confusing when you are hiding from people so they don't find out you are a fake. Kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy.

​

I've always had a lot of self-doubt. I grew up with a lot of adults (teachers and parents) yelling at me about how I wasn't smart, would never be mature, would never be successful, etc. As a result of this, my drive to be successful has largely been fuelled by anger as a sort of ""fuck you"" to all those people. I do truly have a passion for my work, but my drive to be successful has been based mostly on being angry and afraid of those people being right about me.

​

Socially, I'm specifically scared of people seeing me as ""a child"". Like as if, somehow I even LOOK less like an adult than everyone around me (which is kind of true, I have a very young looking face). My friends often describe me as being very intelligent which makes me feel like I have to live up to that. I also feel like I need to live up to that in order to prove to people who think I'm stupid wrong. As a result, I overcompensate on a feature of my personality that I likely possess anyway. I believe this makes me come off as arrogant and unapproachable which adds to my paranoia in professional settings as well as social settings.

​

My last job was extremely intense. I was working almost 80 hours a week while having huge issues in my relationship (no surprise there, working too much doesn't help relationships). I had, what I think was several mental breakdowns, and then finally quit after my will to work was mostly destroyed. I stayed in this job because I believed I was doing the right thing as my girlfriend and I needed the money very badly. I look back on this time as a period of immense failure. I failed myself, my girlfriend, and proved those people from when I was a kid right about me. Additionally, I feel as if there is now a company out there that knows that I can't perform my job adequately and I find that terrifying. Is it possible for a situation like this to trigger everything I'm going through? Even though much of it seems to be rooted in my upbringing?

​

These days, I drink a lot. I'm probably an alcoholic, and I'm definitely addicted to cannabis. I drink every day and smoke every day. Smoking is the only thing that will make me calm and let me sleep and it's hard to imagine a version of myself without it. I have no excuse for the drinking as it just makes me feel worse so I feel like it's just some form of self-harm. Ultimately, I hate myself. I resent the fact that I spent my 20s working instead of learning how to be a more well-rounded person. I'm not attractive and I'm scared that if things don't work out with my girlfriend that all these personality flaws will make me unlovable. I don't even know who I would be if I didn't have these flaws. I feel as if I'm already unlovable as it is and I feel guilty that my girlfriend is still around. I feel responsible for how unhappy we were and I feel like I failed her because I all brought was chaos into her life. It crushes me knowing that I tried as hard as I did and just totally missed the mark. I don't know how to tell her that I am as ugly of a human as I am because I don't know if I can deal with the guilt of having strung her along once she finds out how awful I am. I love her so much and it's hard to think about not having her in my life.

\-----

Disclaimers (even if they are unnecessary):

 \- I'm sorry if my own struggles take away from people with real problems. I mean none of this to be offensive to anyone and I'm deeply sorry if it does. I realize that I likely take everything in my life for granted and I feel so terrible about that.

​

 \- If you are reading this and are somehow able to figure out who I am (I am not famous, not even a bit) please do not message me and please keep this to yourself. I would never interject myself into your problems if you had the same issues (or any other issues for that matter). Additionally, if you struggle with the same thing I'd rather not learn about it through this. I don't know why, it just makes me very uncomfortable. Let's just keep this anonymous.

​

 \- Please don't DM me. If you do, I won't respond. I don't mean to be rude but I feel like I've written this in a way to be vague enough so that no one can figure out who I am and any additional messaging threatens my anonymity. Whatever you have to say to me, if anything, can be said out in the open. If not, just don't say it.

​

\-----

​

Writing this was a weird experience. I feel much better than I did an hour-ish ago so maybe I need to find more outlets to express myself. Perhaps that will help lead me to some conclusions. I still don't know what I'm trying to accomplish here (attention is definitely not it so trolls, go F yourselves). I don't know if I'm looking for advice (I have a great therapist), someone to relate to, a ""hot take"", or what. All I know is that I'm not getting better. Maybe I'm just curious to see how others react as I spend so much time and effort hiding this stuff from people.

​

I will almost definitely delete this if I suspect anyone knows who I am. That's not really a warning as much as it is a way to make myself feel less anxious about posting this.

​

Thanks for reading and for being a thoughtful human. I hope this place is as safe of a space as I'd like it to be.",4.8360515873015855,5.594551327380955,5.720159788359791,80.98224761904763,69.12566137566137,8.455407407407408,29.73640211640212,8.578712619260196,2.161410560846561,6005,221,1180,91,100,1975,472,1512,0.158,0.748,0.094,-0.9986,6,0,5,0,1,0,230.0,1,9,4,33,74,79,11,13,59,1,135,15,2,25,15,273,248,115,0,33,57,1,24,14,5,19,7,4,0,10,112,65,4,3,65,5,3,13,45,39,1,2,28,36,175,40,195,180,39,117,0,3,8,3,72,62,1,54,46,861,287,37,0.024419064183565018,0.0,0.023829484150802945,0.02662038434933461,0.0,0.023862026904551425,0.02164602703670721,0.02609655330060238,0.04890433090665432,0.0,0.026947044545061225,0.058583750415696176,0.02031861757117234,0.3174965500885853,0.3560620293935816,0.04981740303064563,0.0,0.018680517262509383,0.027586591917149312,0.0,0.05122313234601311,0.0,0.02009480918396311,0.043476288531241115,0.0,0.0,0.022942514626897687,0.018776753058284062,0.04077779721656887,0.05954253950696725,0.0,0.020778825071152886,0.11004769298202943,0.051252602648226384,0.043193355752321805,0.05331858721255674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02508510545732693,0.0,0.042069723164862696,0.0,0.02638833335095266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874138129811313,0.0251749829357454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0213692876242074,0.0,0.0,0.07176415939519923,0.0,0.0,0.020398994739490885,0.0,0.0,0.02523142092893532,0.027233711452776786,0.12902849273252354,0.0,0.041148229520511635,0.046666924566804616,0.04389256067568039,0.14331918253544884,0.0,0.027478236110463728,0.22224622611589834,0.12211489032329008,0.0,0.026749891218667887,0.15623007592591467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0188661084141146,0.022575031354147818,0.025515906352412517,0.0,0.04163375073922483,0.0,0.0,0.026922104469249957,0.053800704455671235,0.0,0.04318739562465729,0.0,0.10937342557730312,0.04821754077359512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03273516798092417,0.0,0.0,0.024253640563794174,0.04809571874982451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194863494237297,0.12116076639386295,0.0434095724691564,0.0,0.05085739528069071,0.17446102780065176,0.01990479647868641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04994029513982233,0.08623953595187372,0.16701889827720334,0.0,0.04312496210416559,0.0,0.0820234552629051,0.0,0.0,0.062280645404604464,0.02203915880958604,0.0,0.16299914959670592,0.0,0.04906446423539414,0.05319903917973954,0.0,0.0,0.02460867327184233,0.0518095363720959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770493121073674,0.05431928003782408,0.07533395074368457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04686150133986722,0.0,0.0,0.026005506403455714,0.0330939797222639,0.01857179867677605,0.0,0.0,0.02711448097443513,0.0,0.02331075983791877,0.1862201490376081,0.08528713983150188,0.05102544947789919,0.08041439869861572,0.0,0.05505765167031057,0.02338671343505818,0.0,0.026327881293074718,0.0467314931140374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025972680561244764,0.04885134465826153,0.05558848210879487,0.015643477801866056,0.0,0.0,0.05243387270697965,0.0,0.06256124216779388,0.023228121948002046,0.03883803989648114,0.07334322956381414,0.0,0.05837649782221105,0.022230198916806138,0.0764232286304108,0.027586591917149312,0.0,0.0,0.02744805126100951,0.024436699339680512,0.049784321539759036,0.12414116303925732,0.0,0.04830215774280041,0.054670286270541074,0.0,0.026027473359806284,0.039002192400772295,0.0,0.0,0.07658432349576119,0.02795398628026195,0.0,0.0,0.02301467900525589,0.0,0.05508029182802071,0.03925423762607634,0.021343338410257744,0.022481793495486173,0.0,0.02835241561632652,0.0648917647763271,0.09388050198139307,0.023991606577991854,0.038772018651625086,0.04271685809504725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947365002701863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208897119363542,0.0,0.07753086614013889,0.019587500352810462,0.0,0.043911342625478335,0.0,0.022034407283201253,0.0,0.0,0.0235391064766192,0.026481433459537827,0.24888317377400554,0.0,0.0248851125820696,0.08673301289413023,0.026698413315812068,0.3560620293935816,0.0
mentalhealth,skybluefairy,2020/01/16,"New blog sharing my mental health experience Hi Reddit! I recently published my blog: [Sincerelyesther.com](https://Sincerelyesther.com). Each post is a letter addressed to myself (and anyone else going through something similar). Content so far has been reflections on my experience with bipolar disorder, suicide, depression, and how all of that has affected my identity. I hope my writing can be helpful to those in this community. Feel free to reach out with any questions or thoughts.",10.0028,13.269816946666666,8.47966666666667,56.53150000000002,59.53333333333333,10.866666666666667,43.16666666666667,10.864195022040775,5.937666666666668,401,23,48,11,6,122,63,75,0.141,0.71,0.149,-0.2244,0,0,1,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,2,1,16,10,5,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,6,0,0,4,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,8,4,10,7,2,8,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,3,2,35,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15503055704502558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15940515277981088,0.2335869357631189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19635420344388105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612786617119081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19044353931956653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44600584036948293,0.0,0.0,0.11527081615336696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12956322843656107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423263571445889,0.0,0.0,0.1528065801801207,0.0,0.0,0.2264302339081269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22974479358905106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201793055596009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21833666494372045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255383745321174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250974310829245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17550599788806748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493672290632364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18098638077211485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Starrlovexo,2020/01/16,"Mental health, Remember, before you think that you’re alone, your not alone, god is with you but you can’t feel him, if you don’t believe in him, I know deep down you do, but prayers are powerful, they help spiritually first then mentally, you’ll feel in your heart, when your heart is broken, Jesus can put it back together, I’ve been broken before, to the point where i thought suicide was the only way out. But I learned that, that was devil telling you that, you think you’re not good enough, because they way people treat you, you’re good enough, it’s them that’s not good enough that’s why they treat you like that, everyone is good enough, even for Jesus, Jesus loves anyone, life is nothing without Jesus, life is nothing without a purpose, like darkness is nothing without light, the word of Jesus is powerful and you’ll realize that when you’re done with everything, but you still wanna live, trust in god with all your heart but do not lean in your own understanding. 💛✝️ it’s gonna be okay,",5.7929421768707465,6.177127035714289,5.530000000000001,84.50666666666669,66.90816326530611,8.574149659863947,29.08843537414966,8.344100000000001,1.8281272108843536,793,25,160,10,12,245,103,196,0.172,0.662,0.16699999999999998,-0.0526,2,2,0,0,0,1,30.0,0,17,4,3,6,12,0,0,4,1,20,7,3,0,1,31,29,10,1,2,13,0,2,2,0,3,3,0,0,0,11,5,0,0,10,0,0,1,9,1,0,1,5,3,26,11,16,20,6,18,6,0,0,1,26,9,0,1,8,100,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21085400370643745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117613570952458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827264729729155,0.0,0.06205215805346227,0.0,0.17323694261707467,0.11468601935496445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416973196571762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4207181305627792,0.0,0.06723341404930919,0.0,0.0,0.09726771491664432,0.09148511753012492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293934808008076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658519946798125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415170511300024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820135598717276,0.0,0.3618761105662052,0.0682298012237539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594285187800653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14379902126187905,0.09946198043212882,0.0,0.08988521439278309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187229010665653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20516710183940906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.293019811903426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741827583242672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057055169145128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622742706889664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233022893640573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531179300304548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129213927803924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134518193292037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897169784079323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044987769136324,0.0,0.08081238890191803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597025672720936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16159732519258035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185248292552753,0.0,0.0,0.29437488577796445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,j342imac,2020/01/16,"Thinking ”worst-case scenarios” is this normal? Okay I have a question for y'all 

I don't know if I'm crazy, but I often think something bad will happen and think about what to do in the situation I'm imaging. So like an example; I often imagine something bad happening to me when I’m in a car. I will imagine like me and my family crashing, and them dying or getting badly injured, but I will be ”fine”. I also often imagine someone breaking into our house and stuff. It’s not dreaming since I’m awake, and I have done this since I was a kid.

Am I insane? Or does anyone know why I think like this?",3.247723577235772,4.310781739837402,4.993658536585368,83.60235772357723,73.0650406504065,7.0926829268292675,28.300813008130078,7.3871296695380915,1.6222617886178856,466,18,93,5,9,159,78,123,0.18,0.705,0.115,-0.8826,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,1,1,1,0,7,8,0,0,5,1,12,1,0,0,0,26,25,13,1,2,6,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,10,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,0,17,5,7,19,0,6,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,7,4,64,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13099595131835606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453727191515288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4103146069544083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700052235790293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433481199888467,0.16763086105402855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544221337414214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558210432074405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897069887812317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890106393096851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18004747162476029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24008265799508485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16049553232893154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835007022700597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710047606877962,0.184125302387994,0.0,0.0,0.13879266549771474,0.2522124015729033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875191840709848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4198422115359292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780983412555873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Namae_wa_Rozain,2020/01/16,"My Older sister is mentally abusive to me. What should I do?
I'm sorry if there grammer or spelling mistakes, I jsut need to write everything out.

G= my cousin
B= My sister
(A)+ dorm mate



Since I was 6 or 7, my  5 year older sister and my mom would always fight. I grew up in a house where my mom and dad were always fighting. I don't know why. but my sister always gets into fights with my mom. So since i was little I would have to be my families theripist. I had wished that I could just cover my ears and hide,and ignore all the bad stuff. But when I was little, i found that talking it out and dealing with things is better. Even if it made my, sad or depressed as a kid. I didn't want my family to break up. So i would always help my sister, who was always in the wrong to apoligize to my mom. My sister theres something wrong with her. Evento this day, she doesnt know how to say sorry. Instead she blackmails people and threathens them. 

She is also overly jealous of our cousin (G) who is the same age as her, who is more liked and is on broadway. I talked to her about it and told her that hate, will drive her to dispare. She told me that, I'd rather keep my dispare the rest of my life. After a while, I stopped caring and was decesitized. But now that i have to care again, I'll i do is cry and have small panic attacks. 

I do not respect my sister, my mom has told me that I am much more mature than her and more understanding. Like one time a friend of my mom let my sister drive his Very expenzive BMW, to practice drivig. She crashed it into a poll, and go tmade at him. Also she doesn't have a job at all, and is a college drop out. As you can see, i don't see her as a adult figure. The only thing I've learned for her, is not to be like her. She always cruses at me, I've never cursed at her or called her a bitch. It's so i don't stoop to (B)'s level and she can't hold anything against me. 

Also I just greduated recently from Highschool, and I wanted all my cousins and my church family to come to it. Because I love them. But my mom told me that I couldn't because (B) didn't want our cousin (G) to come and she hates most of the church family. So because of that, I couldn't invite anyone I loved. I cried so hard. I love my cousins so much. Also when I was in middle school, I wanted to learn piano, and my cousin (G) was teaching kids. So i asked my mom, if i could learn. I was really intrested in learning. When my sister heard that, she stopped talking to me and got mad. Called me a Trator. So i stopped my lessons.

Another time she made me misreable was, when I went over seas. Bymyself.
I empahsis to my mom and sister, ""this is my vacation from you guys!""
 When I was 16, I went to Japan to do a langauge program for a month. I asked to go for my birthday present, instead of having a brithday party. And i remember I was in my door room, with my friend. And i got my sisters text. She told me that she and Mom where fighting. I told my dorm mate that (B) always tells me when her and mom are fighting and gets me involved. 
(A) told me that, it shouldn't be my problem, and thats shes an adult and, that (B), shouldn't be asking me and telling me all the time. (B) is an adult and should deal with it hearself. So i agrred, with her, and teaxted my sister, ""your an adult, you should be able to deal with it yourself"". (B) told me "" you ungrate ful bitch, I already fixed it. I don't think of you as my sister anymore."" 

She even made me depressed overseas.

The most recent fights, between her and my mom was. My mom's sister asked my mom to go to (G)'s broadway show in LA and my mom went. My sister got mad, saying my mo is a traitor and doesn't support my sister. 

Me=
Excuse me, but my mom is a single parent, and has paided for modeling, acting, dancing, ballet and singing lessons for you. All byherself. My dad is a dead beat and he did nothing for you. I as a child, never wanted to ask to much from my mom becasue I saw that she was stuggling. My sister would just ask and ask. (B) is so selfish. my mom doesn't ask of anything from mys sister. 

The most recent fight is that my mom is want's to date a man from phillipines. This man, has been seperated from his wife in phillipines for lot's of years. In phillipines I forgot, but I don't thinking they have divorce in phillipines or they jsut have annulment.  My mom is already getting divorced very soon and my sister has said to my mom. You can date anyone you want, a while ago. So my sister ended up finding out my mom started talking to him on FB messanger. (My sister, saw my mom's messages because, my mom gave (B) her account to post photos on FB for the holidays. So my sister see's these msaagese and she gets really mad. She tells mom that she doesn't like this man because hes ugly. (The real reason is because he not rich and can't support my sister's dream, of becoming famous) So she's lashing out at my mom and is locking herself in her rooma nd saying she starving herself. and she going to kill herself. She always says that everytime, she mad about something. 

What should I do about my sister? Do I jsut ignore her or do I keep trying ti help her even though I feel emotionally abused and consantly cry lately. I have small panick attacks.",1.8637572265701827,3.5233321913123845,3.316524167223818,91.78645258976678,77.82624768946395,5.67634404373304,22.878475636134816,6.3021725930635535,0.3951794627757894,4029,123,876,29,94,1322,367,1082,0.16899999999999998,0.773,0.057,-0.9991,2,0,2,0,14,0,176.0,2,10,4,4,44,47,19,1,35,0,97,5,1,5,7,149,171,90,2,29,22,60,2,4,4,11,1,7,4,11,41,58,0,9,17,6,3,14,23,31,0,1,44,14,205,16,106,106,18,93,2,3,5,3,199,39,2,13,41,606,246,12,0.02673483615656014,0.06335281826552716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023698819165082003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059005113005158774,0.08551935526148352,0.17796420292263326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028033806763459738,0.0,0.0,0.026513773602532462,0.037387238113139064,0.0,0.044000984402356516,0.0,0.199947702950288,0.0608294713886973,0.0,0.0,0.022322471475875426,0.09778384786356774,0.029526526085519787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023644789997061832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05459851369945085,0.0,0.05451589449008076,0.0,0.0,0.04605938816940544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04269118247519189,0.0,0.08810088644036669,0.01724175760316911,0.08268732646409177,0.04605335041341215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03007309226556018,0.023679129514930657,0.0,0.0,0.05297432141748923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024027546865329392,0.0,0.10081289675567563,0.0,0.013517936452703041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02443515590470157,0.0,0.0,0.029313367919260175,0.04131053619185974,0.0,0.05587139380853122,0.0,0.06077609396925651,0.0,0.06414687224448938,0.0,0.0,0.02647169103994744,0.0,0.0,0.02394916193929285,0.05279023154875567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035839594259165115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030848411436858018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026530199632492882,0.04752630153494227,0.029578135111716624,0.0,0.029385533550555124,0.0,0.03015805967209675,0.0,0.0,0.02733818131065013,0.01888360542041476,0.05224516206943735,0.053590658644678574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022729001653519168,0.07238770028696535,0.07589144517789677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026942426745240455,0.0,0.0,0.8140994416948921,0.021339491154951398,0.0,0.058959542174237475,0.019823542254210447,0.041239107588617305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025652796334737923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018116216882683164,0.020333047614920528,0.0,0.03136756988747982,0.02968587169731005,0.0,0.0,0.018534569161155017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0256045828466889,0.0,0.0,0.02558162758333866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030430096546671545,0.03425404125299419,0.02748786424961797,0.07919227616981171,0.0,0.03028535772054392,0.0,0.025430951400766226,0.08504245907778928,0.0,0.027057081495221437,0.06391260913761816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04423066547776079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041163566038476984,0.0,0.059854920527989325,0.018923054635059798,0.0,0.0,0.06705456040080875,0.0,0.0,0.030604991145751013,0.0,0.06067675049664465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859537944201935,0.07010227555931083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035522874385431634,0.034261207007507004,0.02626684078364304,0.0,0.04676789387624228,0.0,0.0,0.20437025315061466,0.0,0.018151198829568817,0.0,0.0,0.02783190729361611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044118079455414745,0.11038229328601444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435038288597952,0.024124031293540682,0.0,0.030743742175647206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596664218279182,0.058460692864615124,0.0,0.03443271589758076
mentalhealth,Salty_Cheesecake,2020/01/16,"Mental Health Awareness Site Heyo,

Recently, I've started a site. As of now, it serves 2 main purposes for the community.

1). It debunks and adds more information about mental health topics portrayed in the media (such as tv, books, and movie). I've seen countless instances where mental health gets used as a stepping stone to spice storylines instead of media focusing on raising awareness and educating viewers more. This leaves viewers with incomplete information that contributes to the stigma and misconceptions about mental illness. I think that this issue is something that needs to be changed. To help remedy this problem, I created a platform to provide more information about mental health topics that get barely/incorrectly touched upon by media. This provides supplementary information to help better educate the public and hopefully de-stigmatize mental health. 

2). The second purpose is to be a space where people can comfortably and anonymously share their own mental health stories. This can help serve as an inspiration to others as well as give people the chance to speak out and share their stories without the fear of being judged. I think that there's a lot of power in understanding the viewpoints/stories of others, but this sharing gets hindered by a fear of judgment. I think that people sharing their stories comfortably can be very beneficial. 

To continue and pursue this project further, the help and contributions of others who are also passionate about spreading awareness about mental health would be very helpful. If you are interested, please pm me!",10.055820610687023,11.477403694656491,8.766479007633594,61.37697041984737,57.854961832061065,11.130152671755726,41.18416030534351,10.9516,5.187022137404582,1296,65,169,30,16,399,143,262,0.013000000000000001,0.769,0.218,0.9947,1,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,3,2,13,15,0,2,16,0,13,9,0,1,0,31,26,18,0,5,3,0,1,0,0,1,8,1,0,0,19,12,0,0,9,2,0,1,1,3,1,1,1,6,9,12,38,19,6,17,0,0,3,1,21,12,0,4,4,121,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062059262418163424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863373666760596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209391088356953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746503820735894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163342951185065,0.07444407441374243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5774201151883227,0.0,0.0,0.260078993613714,0.0,0.0,0.07707750188392049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099759375468987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217059889727284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597547765909795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6256463001443885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05754180007789062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16140089286633358,0.0,0.0,0.08518502546568159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425579551782051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662381197468288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05974274569864031,0.0,0.0,0.0549279544851446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14917501868021066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078768288424798,0.0,0.06702426083804014,0.0,0.12806155808529993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977460940427391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480672928359712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05512709687571631,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skeeler87,2020/01/16,"Writing this is scary, and yet I somehow feel like it might help. Hi Reddit,

I'm not sure what I'm trying to accomplish by writing this. I guess it's just cause I've never tried writing about my life experiences on the internet so I'm interested in seeing what happens. I guess I haven't before because I often feel like my experiences are somehow ""not real"", invalid, or would offend someone. Also, my apologies if this is a bit ""stream of consciousness"", I have a very hard time expressing the way I feel and organizing those thoughts in a way that make sense.

It's hard for me to quantify the level of success that I've had in my career as I feel largely dissociated from it. Or at least, ashamed or scared of it. Talking about it often makes me feel like I'm actually talking about someone else's experiences. In the past, I've had people described me as ""one of the best if not the best in my city and/or country"". Some might refer to me as being fairly recognizable in my field, and it's possible that I've gotten work just based on who I know or who I've worked with (I work in an industry that is very reputation based). I certainly don't identify with any of these descriptions in case anyone was wondering. I have delusions (I think) about how others might think of me in a professional setting. I'm constantly in fear that someone will somehow find out that I know nothing about what I'm doing and that if that ""secret"" gets out, my life will be over and everyone will hate me for deceiving them. On bad days, I will try and find places at work to hide from people. On the worst days, I can't go into work. Sometimes I've even believed that someone is watching me in secret while I work trying to catch me making a mistake or not doing my job. Sometimes I'll believe that person is someone who has nothing to do with my job or even doesn't work at my company (like a construction worker, for example). I know these experiences are ridiculous, even when they are happening, but I can't shake the anxiety and feelings that come with it. I'm also deeply afraid that these same people will find out that I struggle with these issues and will think I'm unstable and not fit to be working, leading to the same disaster scenario, which is confusing when you are hiding from people so they don't find out you are a fake. Kind of a self-fulfilling prophecy.

I've always had a lot of self-doubt. I grew up with a lot of adults (teachers and parents) yelling at me about how I wasn't smart, would never be mature, would never be successful, etc. As a result of this, my drive to be successful has largely been fuelled by anger as a sort of ""fuck you"" to all those people. I do truly have a passion for my work, but my drive to be successful has been based mostly on being angry and afraid of those people being right about me.

Socially, I'm specifically scared of people seeing me as ""a child"". Like as if, somehow I even LOOK less like an adult than everyone around me (which is kind of true, I have a very young looking face). My friends often describe me as being very intelligent which makes me feel like I have to live up to that. I also feel like I need to live up to that in order to prove to people who think I'm stupid wrong. As a result, I overcompensate on a feature of my personality that I likely possess anyway. I believe this makes me come off as arrogant and unapproachable which adds to my paranoia in professional settings as well as social settings.

My last job was extremely intense. I was working almost 80 hours a week while having huge issues in my relationship (no surprise there, working too much doesn't help relationships). I had, what I think was several mental breakdowns, and then finally quit after my will to work was mostly destroyed. I stayed in this job because I believed I was doing the right thing as my girlfriend and I needed the money very badly. I look back on this time as a period of immense failure. I failed myself, my girlfriend, and proved those people from when I was a kid right about me. Additionally, I feel as if there is now a company out there that knows that I can't perform my job adequately and I find that terrifying. Is it possible for a situation like this to trigger everything I'm going through? Even though much of it seems to be rooted in my upbringing?

These days, I drink a lot. I'm probably an alcoholic, and I'm definitely addicted to cannabis. I drink every day and smoke every day. Smoking is the only thing that will make me calm and let me sleep and it's hard to imagine a version of myself without it. I have no excuse for the drinking as it just makes me feel worse so I feel like it's just some form of self-harm. Ultimately, I hate myself. I resent the fact that I spent my 20s working instead of learning how to be a more well-rounded person. I'm not attractive and I'm scared that if things don't work out with my girlfriend that all these personality flaws will make me unlovable. I don't even know who I would be if I didn't have these flaws. I feel as if I'm already unlovable as it is and I feel guilty that my girlfriend is still around. I feel responsible for how unhappy we were and I feel like I failed her because I all brought was chaos into her life. It crushes me knowing that I tried as hard as I did and just totally missed the mark. I don't know how to tell her that I am as ugly of a human as I am because I don't know if I can deal with the guilt of having strung her along once she finds out how awful I am. I love her so much and it's hard to think about not having her in my life.

Disclaimers (even if they are unnecessary):
 - I'm sorry if my own struggles take away from people with real problems. I mean none of this to be offensive to anyone and I'm deeply sorry if it does. I realize that I likely take everything in my life for granted and I feel so terrible about that.

 - If you are reading this and are somehow able to figure out who I am (I am not famous, not even a bit) please do not message me and please keep this to yourself. I would never interject myself into your problems if you had the same issues (or any other issues for that matter). Additionally, if you struggle with the same thing I'd rather not learn about it through this. I don't know why, it just makes me very uncomfortable. Let's just keep this anonymous.

 - Please don't DM me. If you do, I won't respond. I don't mean to be rude but I feel like I've written this in a way to be vague enough so that no one can figure out who I am and any additional messaging threatens my anonymity. Whatever you have to say to me, if anything, can be said out in the open. If not, just don't say it.

-----

Writing this was a weird experience. I feel much better than I did an hour-ish ago so maybe I need to find more outlets to express myself. Perhaps that will help lead me to some conclusions. I still don't know what I'm trying to accomplish here (attention is definitely not it so trolls, go F yourselves). I don't know if I'm looking for advice (I have a great therapist), someone to relate to, a ""hot take"", or what. All I know is that I'm not getting better. Maybe I'm just curious to see how others react as I spend so much time and effort hiding this stuff from people. I guess by writing this I am sort of soliciting advice so if you have some you can post it. Just don't DM me.

I will almost definitely delete this if I suspect anyone knows who I am. That's not really a warning as much as it is a way to make myself feel less anxious about posting this.

Thanks for reading and for being a thoughtful human. I hope this place is as safe of a space as I'd like it to be.",4.5181736840759745,5.237633511082142,5.575294117647059,81.87697573944834,69.82138200782268,8.388567630442008,28.8592939131324,8.525020545135161,2.0005672929928164,6002,212,1210,91,102,1989,474,1534,0.154,0.746,0.1,-0.9981,6,0,5,0,1,0,176.0,1,11,4,33,78,80,11,13,58,1,140,15,2,25,15,284,255,118,0,34,59,1,25,15,5,20,7,4,0,10,115,66,4,3,66,5,3,13,46,39,1,2,28,37,181,41,197,186,40,119,0,3,8,3,77,62,1,60,48,883,296,37,0.029936606715944794,0.0,0.02921380974732668,0.03263532012949468,0.0,0.058507411219110815,0.02653699558219543,0.031993128275883354,0.05995437458427597,0.0,0.03303578993192892,0.07182088072482885,0.024909654959229,0.0,0.0,0.0610737574104867,0.0,0.02290142219760188,0.03381984447269641,0.0,0.06279711442969442,0.0,0.024635276563019944,0.05329985381277177,0.0,0.0,0.02812642746246206,0.02301940268810904,0.049991632309832015,0.07299631037000906,0.0,0.02547384737999828,0.1349132169863147,0.06283324361304586,0.05295299173542576,0.0653660420413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03075314151512096,0.0,0.051575471834944785,0.0,0.032350836685559985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653317369051287,0.03086332701214936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02619772627635592,0.0,0.0,0.08797943278925463,0.0,0.0,0.02500819352970023,0.0,0.0,0.03093251729697203,0.03338722987288016,0.1581827711761546,0.0,0.050445764626887775,0.057211421244363674,0.053810183585493714,0.14641872876323214,0.0,0.03368700542752455,0.2876001091494138,0.17109374255590254,0.0,0.032794089367541614,0.1915306133371034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023128948087775183,0.027675910516837043,0.03128128284240959,0.0,0.051040990458131784,0.0,0.0,0.03300521458983492,0.09893564214149196,0.0,0.05294568490349607,0.0,0.1340865973433614,0.05911240267432774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060197629335333826,0.0,0.0,0.02973380525683152,0.058963054690000974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498415854737625,0.14853731435690085,0.05321806310624621,0.0,0.062348738250996724,0.21388088983535866,0.024402330059167858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061224417268426375,0.10572555327056403,0.2193827082749525,0.0,0.05286914438847872,0.0,0.10055683965731707,0.0,0.0,0.07635309746012789,0.02701895636430176,0.0,0.19982917444454013,0.0,0.060150690399188536,0.06521948186130253,0.0,0.0,0.030169058404627736,0.0952740266486598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320411029180146,0.06659284366352017,0.09235582653040028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057449963077394015,0.0,0.0,0.03188150912733214,0.040571638952391145,0.022768138402639623,0.0,0.0,0.03324105899950696,0.0,0.0285778785080262,0.22829701099174615,0.10455796110245164,0.06255476467244248,0.09858421313949743,0.0,0.06749805202882826,0.05734198798290119,0.0,0.032276725349095294,0.05729057920022134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031841266212165466,0.05988941597375904,0.06814882480006544,0.019178156832859682,0.0,0.0,0.06428142430123204,0.0,0.0766970956937302,0.028476568400821627,0.04761358245586075,0.08991529741778209,0.0,0.07156679894121162,0.02725316241387958,0.09369122920816736,0.03381984447269641,0.0,0.0,0.033650000243374244,0.029958226575290563,0.061033201082250514,0.15219113833475595,0.0,0.05921613903824208,0.06702316054481845,0.0,0.03190843956692925,0.04781482558808976,0.0,0.0,0.0938887238210526,0.034270252419351485,0.0,0.0,0.028214897544590112,0.0,0.06752580778114786,0.04812382099953706,0.02616591377908908,0.027561605354083543,0.0,0.034758707760972965,0.07955420513288858,0.11509301277826982,0.029412564101961414,0.04753264356208108,0.05236882835964421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194994521791025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14820501453443244,0.0,0.09504913990709067,0.024013340159250468,0.0,0.05383320935913652,0.0,0.02701313121983216,0.0,0.0,0.028857820583868876,0.032464972973297083,0.30511888725462183,0.0,0.030507959799410518,0.10633053243899844,0.0327309799166318,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mypicturesofyou,2020/01/16,"Helping my friend with a mental illness while struggling myself So I have a friend who suffers from depression (and/or something else, I don't really know). I share a flat with him. He recently quit smoking weed after admitting he had addiction issues with it. The last days he was very active, almost manic I believe. Today, we werde hanging out with some friends and he suggested going to a club but no one else was up for it. He insisted he would go but when it became clear that no else felt like it he suddenly became quiet and dismissive. After our friends left he and I sat in the kitchen silently. I asked if he felt okay and he said something like ""yeah, I'm just tired"". He turned up the music, put his head on the table and kept quiet again. Eventually I suggested going to bed. He just said ""okay, good night"" and stayed where he was. I tried to convince him to go to bed but he didn't respond. Eventually, I left. Now I'm in my room and he is still there, I think. I feel helpless and I don't know what to do.

A bit of background: He has been struggling with his mental health for a while and so have I. He never talks to me about me details but I know that he's been seing a therapist about his depression. Lately, he said he was feeling better and he advised me to see a therapist myself. I currently struggle with depression and self harm issues. 

I'm just feeling helpless right now. I feel that there is something wrong and I really want to help him but I don't know how. I hate to see him like that and it makes me feel even more horrible. Sometimes I believe he knows that and tries to force me to do something about it but I also don't want to allege he's doing it on purpose. I'm afraid I am unaible to give advise to someone about mental health issues right now. I feel lost and helpless and I don't know how to solve this problem. Maybe someone has an idea what I could do?

Sorry about this messy post. Maybe all of this doesn't even make sense, I don't know.",1.9017105263157923,4.13352495739349,3.1167913533834586,90.48330733082709,80.12781954887218,5.8947619047619035,22.75695488721805,7.066338657993696,0.7659027067669175,1554,51,318,19,40,501,181,399,0.16,0.7090000000000001,0.131,-0.9575,1,0,4,0,0,0,46.0,2,0,0,3,24,29,1,4,13,3,28,7,1,4,3,67,69,31,0,6,10,0,8,3,4,1,5,5,4,1,18,24,1,1,18,1,0,6,11,16,0,1,16,15,44,13,41,51,4,40,0,8,2,0,53,13,0,3,22,195,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129887403722381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467711559082317,0.0,0.0,0.05963841948050722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06971851545333008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804328240393568,0.0,0.06595643290628861,0.08141770322983206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05954288688893013,0.0,0.0,0.04809536598469377,0.0,0.1926966606827213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868960960948688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851352106920724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22624727107789244,0.0,0.1432093563196846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304690047151853,0.0,0.0,0.07154011769926309,0.16953309226631647,0.06255083072851687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362838421668387,0.07653651584759116,0.15854165244295906,0.0,0.0,0.09997347383660288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418725371531956,0.0,0.2335139809125464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868952273626594,0.06078941312121783,0.08412500341909028,0.0,0.16205413665000598,0.0,0.0,0.10930223509510607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140853979245011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956015027685676,0.0,0.14984327969242436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254652752901421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057517627205017435,0.0,0.0,0.06998454664229634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05053464393157836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142321631238842,0.0,0.0,0.07135918329339379,0.0,0.07496950219536698,0.0,0.07932078130984871,0.0,0.0,0.09555062125538427,0.0,0.0736348268200524,0.0,0.0,0.1273750341058683,0.2128166297966048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885487153759128,0.0,0.07779905749929597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263760463199988,0.2296490670407953,0.07375759467868466,0.08348175328277672,0.0,0.07948811896996448,0.059556509131417024,0.0,0.0,0.2338891575494295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994138323305991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17317702371193314,0.0,0.04778530495639639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571416905664847,0.07068935084347244,0.0,0.0,0.1012644500475518,0.08111729911016749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061533030065332825,0.08797374235285745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05297666778672978,0.08153717514639111,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mozilla11,2020/01/17,"Birthday Tomorrow, turning 21 Got into an accident December 20th, totalled my car. Going straight at a green, hit with a car turning left. Driver said I ate a red light, so their insurance isn't going to cover anything. My attorney said he'd take it to court but itll take up to 2 years. Insurance companies don't want to fully cover a car for me, so no financing a car. I can barely afford to anyways, I just know a car is important for work and what not. Owe $400 for a medical fee, and $400 for a student fee that I couldn't pay when it was due.

Girlfriend just broke up with me today. She's cheated on me, it's okay. I'm not sure why. She's said that I haven't changed since last October. I am not sure what she means, financially? Sure I guess but then again I let her take 3 weeks to pay me back for rent, so I guess that doesn't really help me when I get paid once a month. I don't really feel like she appreciates me anyways. Everyone knows this, my family, friends. I had a sexual history when I was young, like 13 years young. I'm okay and I have accepted that I shouldn't have. I wish I knew better and how it would've affected me.  She called me disgusting for having that past and so I feel like those feelings are what lead her to want to leave me. She's cleaning right now as I sit on the couch typing this up  I'm really not emotional and I don't want to get emotional  I don't know what to do. I don't know, honestly. I accepted her and her faults and decided she was worth sticking with, though she kept getting caught lying, and just hasn't been a really good person to me if I'm being fair to myself. I remember I had an appendectomy, and her face the whole time while I was getting drugged made me cry. I don't think about it but wow, that kinda sucks. 

Anyways, it's for the best but it's difficult to accept it. We live together, sharing a room so doesn't really help the situation, considering my financial situation, our lease isn't up until June.

I'm not sure what's going to happen. My father said he would help me get a new car but he has his own family and kids to worry about. He's also 8 states away. My mom is undependable due to her disabilities so not gonna help there. I have at least $800 that I have to pay SOON, but I never knew all of this would fall on me the way it has. I'm not sure what to do. 

I feel numb now and I guess I'll be fine but it's crazy. Putting it all together, this is the worst way to start a year ever. I'm not sure what to do at this point. I've gained 40 pounds since moving in with my girlfriend in May, I have no friends other than my best friends. I don't really know what to do right now. I feel clueless, and if anything afraid of what I can do to get out of here and somewhere I know what to do. 

I'm not the type to feel emotions as people do so I'm not sad. I just don't want to get to the point where I'm so low that I can feel nothing but sad. Idk. I just need something to help.",0.6879347715477769,2.5344760930599364,2.971250636002853,91.97347206675491,82.2334384858044,6.8032563345883785,20.478172382212264,7.886649535280233,0.7071680879210334,2289,65,537,43,62,783,258,634,0.183,0.69,0.127,-0.9872,3,0,2,0,0,0,71.0,2,0,1,6,34,37,3,1,24,2,54,5,1,4,11,99,121,43,0,12,25,2,7,3,5,6,3,4,4,2,37,21,1,1,22,0,10,14,29,12,0,0,19,14,81,25,62,90,9,73,0,4,2,0,42,24,1,7,34,336,118,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05210938305795618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724422063935828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06122108645431457,0.05010493579308075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676530531910522,0.05762978055737281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653686422355748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893190286621266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157651154298357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07556629737949629,0.0,0.0,0.21989271735903174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058942030248308186,0.0,0.062264312999757015,0.0,0.0,0.1228563484409169,0.0,0.23063220185851285,0.0931023395949115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15103012983452924,0.0,0.2383082399456947,0.0,0.11109782405609507,0.05465411772173175,0.05211535918837544,0.0,0.21534720358783915,0.0,0.05762182838872518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183808729827607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21486532766291164,0.05311506981229184,0.0,0.06899629559223465,0.07079782761162569,0.06663173536183715,0.0,0.09550340346499778,0.0,0.057538527843474824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06165709700851023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709796425953005,0.0,0.06564304734516596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631600251794993,0.05201104313545032,0.06925603665994362,0.0,0.048316199472353834,0.05025632963983243,0.06293308691833285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252392276005117,0.0,0.0,0.06939454465674137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062203732527203126,0.04517456715054539,0.056896240952420324,0.0,0.0,0.123196780006884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550499730864831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504635753828077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738149300439278,0.11129460676623673,0.2479328678788837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078040255678594,0.1464878237264044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05016427039637772,0.0,0.0,0.046121428282052214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3684819234541582,0.0,0.14697932475016184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04175266182780022,0.0640205419665348,0.0,0.037996016057565016,0.0,0.06176519252702091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175333447057928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373504124485907,0.10344384510664176,0.05226837912167781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587978421368387,0.07275014572309522,0.07493215694938121,0.0,0.0,0.04743812507799364,0.06617435519962207,0.0,0.13886592731058628,0.0,0.0,0.1258850170429843
mentalhealth,Trendz12,2020/01/17,"What is the actual point though? I’m 17,  a student, homeless (living in homeless accommodation but still have a supportive family), and am also in therapy. I’m getting support for my mental health but no matter how good things should be, I never enjoy myself. I hate myself. I hate the way I look. I hate my voice. I hate how I stutter out of anxiety. I hate how quietly I speak and how muffled my voice is. I hate how I can never enjoy being out with friends or socialising. I hate how the only thing keeping me alive is how my family would feel if I was dead. I really can’t cope with the struggle and bores of life anymore. Everything is predictable but I don’t have the motivation to change that. I just want to go to sleep and never wake up",2.3204889741131325,4.425579979865778,4.478835091083415,81.9076677852349,78.06040268456375,7.478619367209972,24.065675934803448,8.418075326091056,1.7238816874400764,583,20,113,12,14,201,88,149,0.14400000000000002,0.573,0.28300000000000003,0.9784,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,1,11,16,7,1,7,0,15,4,2,8,3,31,32,18,1,4,6,0,1,0,1,2,2,4,0,0,4,8,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,10,0,0,1,6,23,6,13,27,0,12,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,2,4,86,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.1064008799082804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719397858985438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341026021773304,0.0,0.1081318445756186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534289047309645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799219839936432,0.0,0.2055739904590832,0.0,0.0551305681869124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842389421022849,0.0,0.0569654565405792,0.0,0.06196619958285687,0.09145205125871182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7535354338767181,0.0,0.11589741620525193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691390459673192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701352198890933,0.0,0.0,0.09627849862079058,0.0,0.09156060363980333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988003235526096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25227986248157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292482154389501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307181516917928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984959441046543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091121526316586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707422207573022,0.0,0.0,0.11398539383062012,0.0,0.0,0.2474596431429921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468920669882767,0.0,0.1448739055219898,0.0,0.107124771738947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431073018032953,0.08654564577601141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745420614756132,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tntthunder,2020/01/17,"I cant stop thinking about suicide As the title says i just want to die. I have it all planned out, the method, where, letters ready to send, and whowill find me but the only thing stopping me is my GF and my family. But i just cant shake the feeling of just ending it i have seen countless proffesionals over the years for my depression and ptsd and have done everything and more they have asked of me but i just handle it anymorr. Not sleeping due to insomnia only to finally pass out at night from exhaustion just to be woken up by nightmares in a puddle of sweat and yelling or scared shitless add in the flashbacks and putting on a fake smile day by day as i struggle to find work. I am 21 and have been dealing with this from the age of 9 and i am exhausted and tired of fightning tired of trying and being knocked down again and again and im finally feeling myself giving up and well i dont know what to do anymore. Honestly dont even know why im typing this post just here at 0130 struggling to turj off my brain and wanted to vent",5.732342767295599,5.4059399386792455,5.9386792452830175,83.95144654088053,67.06603773584905,8.953459119496856,32.28930817610063,8.344100000000001,2.2505647798742143,825,31,171,10,12,263,125,212,0.188,0.73,0.08199999999999999,-0.9798,0,0,1,0,2,2,9.0,0,0,1,2,13,10,0,4,9,0,17,8,3,0,1,42,28,21,2,2,11,0,2,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,7,19,0,2,7,0,0,4,5,8,1,0,4,5,19,2,36,22,2,31,0,1,1,0,8,13,0,1,13,122,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12686169007389642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958738834635428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280037641952206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649948847095507,0.13187930344154866,0.11017680762071534,0.0,0.13276016042152827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090597769065807,0.2998412113276388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329863620227415,0.0,0.0,0.08448956941256361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496572496094225,0.0,0.12059104312530475,0.0,0.12935980297709415,0.0,0.0,0.28025894039802,0.23383206191317146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271196226736393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27634984589616074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14060233393523952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004370866385225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19457696391700705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225114426283626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495309546789501,0.12859434706655076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172665581652666,0.12806965353550387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801180026826492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21389272325978906,0.0,0.26745830077796817,0.0,0.13992308156144662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498397754267885,0.08196559814723638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940491074748748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868488882384697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15090037449342691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501491964089396,0.0,0.1154273785079699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312686010385607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237591144295259
mentalhealth,satanskittykatt,2020/01/17,"For those of you struggling through depression waiting for things to get better It gets better only if you make it better. Things don’t just happen, you have to make it happen. I know depression my entire life so I know how tough it is on the mental mind & how easily it can destroy you without you even noticing. I’ve learn that the key thing is to just work on yourself everyday little by little even with just small things. Little accomplishments may not seem like much but they do help in the long run. 
You may not be the same old person you once were before & but you’re also not the same person you were a year ago, or maybe a month ago, or maybe even a week ago. We’re human we make mistakes, we feel like shit & it mind as well just be the end of the world but we’re meant to learn from our pass decisions, overcome obstacles that are thrown at us & keep growing as a person.",4.517500000000002,5.2561270833333325,4.747777777777782,87.74000000000002,69.83333333333334,7.555555555555558,23.88888888888889,7.492282038375204,0.8678888888888889,705,16,147,7,12,221,104,180,0.134,0.784,0.08199999999999999,-0.8807,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,4,8,1,5,12,13,2,1,11,0,13,2,1,5,0,39,27,12,0,2,14,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,4,13,3,0,2,8,0,0,3,5,7,1,0,3,1,16,6,19,20,3,22,0,2,0,0,18,9,1,6,12,96,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649432903020546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967267345564588,0.0,0.4317886577593461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477630057510269,0.0,0.0,0.2643392658800851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17161932700766108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824105597094932,0.0,0.0,0.19741055338526087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05037503538221592,0.07117443985329894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410329453041957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17620186030704574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06677871416271874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855416393564451,0.0,0.0,0.1095061585408258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037037749996107,0.09734665853053508,0.29956103154066704,0.0,0.08816786383593493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995078863079784,0.0,0.2001799309312615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040184057107757,0.0,0.2011922581178772,0.0,0.07952231657030819,0.0,0.0732382252162599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342742000296994,0.1045430863771798,0.10610083197282516,0.0,0.07577177157280457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609746283820458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069781466286317,0.0,0.0,0.10226696426556817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415307580008616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26475432257063297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984051472650338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799157705856107,0.0,0.08957775928923889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603807525679768,0.0,0.07253055067805117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641573248888731
mentalhealth,Vavavevo,2020/01/17,"What is this feeling... not sure if whether I should seek professional help Hi All,

Background: mother and grandfather had depression. I am always fidgeting. If Im watching a tv show, I need to also be playing a game on my phone. As I type this post, I am biting my lip. If Im studying, I need to be snacking. Now, here is the real problem. I have in the past 2 years put on 20lbs, and I am trying so hard to be strong and lose the weight. But when I think of ways to drop the weight, I cant, and it becomes a vicious cycle and I dont know how to feel, then I snack. I'm a strong, functioning woman, but the food is becoming an issue that I am having a hard time controlling. It is the only part of my life that I feel that Im not strong enough to deal with. I am worried that I have mental health issues, but I feel a little embarrassed to speak with people around me.

I googled depression and anxiety and I dont fall into the symptoms that describe either. Unless anxiety, which is concern with the future. Im not necessarily concerned with the future, besides with how am I going to lose these 20lbs that Ive been trying to get rid of.",2.8230769230769246,4.08576669230769,4.507350427350428,85.90153846153852,74.38461538461539,7.2512820512820495,25.393162393162388,7.793537801064563,1.3130444444444451,882,29,185,12,18,298,128,234,0.147,0.8,0.054000000000000006,-0.9507,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,6,8,12,1,1,16,0,24,9,1,3,2,42,35,22,0,7,12,1,8,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,13,14,5,1,6,4,0,3,6,7,0,0,2,10,25,5,24,29,4,20,0,4,1,0,8,6,0,3,8,130,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672070498465237,0.09023209478307027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16591504794292686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965360112179304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395304454814792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162647066892432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179852361822323,0.18680117512789826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25418548530010376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204915673009913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193253165731694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13112800809164368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056656258045167565,0.0,0.061629857932303286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19428473947838334,0.0,0.0,0.1152683453807737,0.0,0.0,0.07268611581590126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4685421285532909,0.2263697040141217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959666506050056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659550611452834,0.0,0.1086869676238427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426368148348402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092836228337147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16081613845865214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08247472017350774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11743168069809645,0.10351977361612966,0.07517974845940284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385707275334666,0.0,0.0,0.1037639618258962,0.0,0.10901375555158108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343027691028052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220492069059443,0.11271233958458615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948499591072753,0.0,0.0,0.06323316657684197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14724945051364255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607589120748074,0.0,0.2641052987036865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101277044180976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983283229964453
mentalhealth,I_am_cursed_hello,2020/01/17,"It hurts I just can't take it. I want to curl up in a ball on the floor and scream for hours. I want to cry and rip myself to pieces to get rid of all the feelings I'm feeling. I just can't ever seem to get rid of them without using self harm as an punishment for thinking or feeling this way. 

I can always be better, so therefor I'll never be good enough. People are smarter than me, prettier than me, friendlier than me, happier than me. I can't be good enough beside them. I can never be good enough as I make mistakes, way too many of them. I just want to be perfect, a perfect daughter, a perfect student and maybe a girlfriend too. But I'm not good enough to be even a friend. I push everyone away by insults and being mean, as I can't let them close. If I let them close it'll be so easy for them to just turn on me, and see me hurting. I can't be hurting, I can't feel like this. I'm not being perfect by crying and complaining to internet strangers, I'm not being perfect for not getting such good scores in my tests or being calm, I'm too emotional to have my dream job or to get into the university with my scores. 

My body is a disgusting piece of fat, skin and bones, too tall and bulky. It combined with acne and personality and my ways of pushing everyone away leaves me alone. I have friends in school, I laugh with them and love to spend time with them. But nobody wants to see me. I'm so god damn lonely, and just hurting so much. I can't feel like this as it's not right, a perfect person wouldn't complain but I just have to get it out. There's literally nobody out there for me. My mother is a narcissist with always bigger problems, father just doesn't talk to me, and why would I ever tell my friends? They'd try get me a therapist by the school, I'd have to go and talk to them. But I know that person doesn't care about me, shy would they? They have no emotional connection and have never met me. Then my parents would get to know how I obsess over any single thing in my life to make it perfect and so they'd think there's something wrong with me. And I can't let that happen, I can't be a disappointment with mental health issues, I have to wait to move out before getting help even if then. I 

I can't let go of anything in my life. If I lose control the person who takes it will hurt me. They'll use the control to make me look weak, and I can't be that. I have to be perfect. And it's not possible, but that's what others want. Nobody will take anything less, nobody wants to see a shriveled mess. We want happy people around us. We want to see the happiness and also be happy. But I'm not happy. I'm so stressed and anxious I feel like I want to just crawl into the deepest part of the room and scream. I want to tell my parents that they fucked me up so bad and I wouldn't be like this, I wouldn't be hurting like this, I wouldn't be this. I would be better, I would be closer for being the best, to having my happiness. I wouldn't have memories with pain and tears for not being a good enough toddler. I want to show people that I can be friendly, I have feelings but it would hurt me, I'm always the though one. I can take anything. But I really can't, it hurts me so much. I don't want to even die anymore, I just want to get rid of this feeling, I can't do anything with it burning inside me. It makes me only see the worst and I can't be happy, I'll never be enough for it. It knows everyone is watching and laughing, it knows what I fear the most and desire, it attacks those things and takes the last happy things away and puts them somewhere where I can't get them. I'm breaking. It just hurts. It hurts so bad and I want it to stop. Just to stop.",2.1484379652605448,3.429455042307694,3.5369644334160446,92.11179900744415,76.14102564102564,6.211745244003309,22.837055417700572,6.6085693004685675,0.4127018196856902,2863,80,648,23,62,940,255,780,0.20800000000000002,0.644,0.149,-0.9901,3,3,1,0,0,0,88.0,3,0,17,14,41,74,6,3,27,0,85,11,4,10,15,156,161,62,1,31,34,5,9,5,5,15,6,2,1,5,41,49,1,5,16,3,1,6,37,36,0,1,1,18,104,38,90,113,17,51,0,13,7,2,46,28,2,8,18,457,145,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0417113743837965,0.0,0.03220683793333099,0.10053275467182674,0.0,0.0,0.02738747543956417,0.0,0.0,0.04549778165638845,0.03994065702702443,0.0,0.0,0.13256718965859407,0.035852103238509785,0.0,0.045817111707537064,0.11351531109149288,0.0,0.06725366148018383,0.0,0.0,0.03426992536819666,0.0,0.04226473011987062,0.07123757348961153,0.0,0.04473496635531543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04106168886012121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903406869197002,0.0,0.0,0.08847746689052753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041797709230897866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060491214317933,0.0,0.24968079067240345,0.0,0.07980113410839408,0.07285967725073315,0.0,0.1154496476526902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045319073505392896,0.16290861396476686,0.08631454989245274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12446134468644272,0.03723235731770953,0.2104132941599848,0.0,0.0457769075247068,0.20267785284219564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035613871810261856,0.30010448101913684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04280902604722619,0.0,0.0,0.026994590882308458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039661450694209364,0.0,0.43113794800402494,0.0,0.0,0.04203524620498189,0.039965401389664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853341924792914,0.03282841486262532,0.0,0.0426439995973051,0.0,0.16473021756012773,0.05689296580992195,0.09837839997893542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033819738130956484,0.04505593314438775,0.0,0.0,0.036348557966874584,0.0,0.10753194509565606,0.040831178383388005,0.04046031288631035,0.04386983133325667,0.0,0.0,0.04058638510832707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042804535723074036,0.0592115601939231,0.0,0.1242461429285343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027290479883607582,0.03062993949017233,0.04285402250182375,0.0,0.08943828500498792,0.04361245805314445,0.0,0.08376207186954124,0.14066165468374844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04540250969986687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03853646141873992,0.0,0.040486160233301864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02580034313457195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034393492617129616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151820471527807,0.16046449665090626,0.036663634983710065,0.042014219324921886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031004637397127124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673411799521133,0.046133350887338435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15140393194683094,0.06474089796822446,0.07040192233420782,0.0,0.0,0.046760832908137734,0.08026810689296289,0.05161148084511133,0.03956867455573121,0.0,0.023483899817374573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027343177095390508,0.04380618615965506,0.0,0.0,0.048444264115125535,0.0695670371287002,0.0,0.0,0.3325623416782908,0.0959020897688846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03634072140951226,0.0,0.0,0.038822379004849895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17165555041707264,0.04403293394352555,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,T_Y_D_E,2020/01/17,"Had my first therapy session I just had my first therapy session. I can already tell this was one of the best decisions I've ever made, I felt comfortable with the therapist I was with and the way he explained his thought process on the human mind and how he goes about therapy really clicked with me. I'm very happy I did this and I'm looking forward to my future sessions. 

I want to get my life together and while I had my doubts because of what my parents said and my mind almost made me pull out at the last moment but I can say without a doubt that this will help me pull myself together, one step at a time. 

So for those with any worries about therapists like I was before going, maybe I got lucky, but it's a good investment I promise",2.3903428571428584,4.486732453333335,3.771238095238097,87.10800000000002,77.8,7.219047619047619,27.380952380952376,8.192908349453996,1.9246952380952385,588,25,118,11,14,193,93,150,0.034,0.7809999999999999,0.185,0.9685,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,6,9,0,2,8,0,10,1,0,3,1,29,23,10,0,1,4,1,1,1,0,1,1,2,0,1,7,10,0,0,4,0,1,5,1,2,0,4,13,5,23,7,16,9,1,18,0,0,2,0,10,5,0,4,10,81,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397459097456736,0.0,0.15400432579660855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949033644344326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507248946776462,0.0,0.11875250143211193,0.0,0.14645618191936755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623705529120324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399634964908835,0.0,0.0,0.2374137725704171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291263330050213,0.0,0.07931330777612745,0.1170535668972518,0.1116162685891313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14856073793613195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354193678476924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137573642516812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857304810604804,0.06818037074121687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171925079404221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641039112961941,0.0,0.0,0.14020349657470235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28182503551340066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891345088523995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15496123720766888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940361708171585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13275041179902175,0.11098111593494923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12197873635545048,0.0,0.4787858619944116,0.3240722480267588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079245781911568,0.08137665363235358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514892076180462,0.08231417725206253,0.1107736392795582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452771107140665,0.0,0.0,0.1417266371891591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HSMentalRevolution,2020/01/17,"We are asking Congress to take action on the mental health crisis in America. Hey guys,

We are a group of high school students who are committed to solving the mental health issues of today through awareness and policy. The mental health crisis is one of the most prevalent issues facing the American population today, not only the youth. 

We are also compiling a list of candidate endorsements who are pledging to focus on mental health reform once they are inaugurated.

In fact, 1 in 5 American adults experience some form of mental illness each year (National Alliance on Mental Illness), while only 41% receive proper treatment (Mental Health First Aid). This is unacceptable, and we demand action now.

We’ve witnessed these problems in our own schools and neighborhoods, and we believe it is time for us as a country to step up and pass bold solutions to protect everyday people. 

We are also asking you to sign and share our petition (https://www.change.org/p/u-s-congress-pass-comprehensive-mental-health-legislation-now ) to ask Congress and the President to commit to comprehensive mental health reform to ensure that everyone has access to quality mental health care.

Thank you.",13.295292397660813,12.970612868421053,11.337017543859654,51.38301169590645,51.894736842105246,13.076023391812866,42.16374269005848,12.06081838636515,5.594988304093566,975,40,118,22,9,301,115,190,0.086,0.7909999999999999,0.124,0.6124,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,9,2,1,1,3,5,0,0,10,0,11,10,1,0,3,23,17,11,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,9,0,0,2,6,14,0,1,1,0,0,5,1,1,0,2,0,0,12,4,27,17,5,24,0,0,0,0,23,10,0,2,9,85,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097799349271234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19250243776624126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733178028499701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998124964010834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558676987015037,0.0,0.06714135925452226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05838364308788543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679626386539232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5836738277115264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252005813975679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432809579934833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6917119161686202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309747448210553,0.046511040791308036,0.1044049332322974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04758510608955145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656775159925383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893110567923414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051607406573845806,0.0,0.0,0.06319286003713008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04002350369078641,0.0,0.13012203212684806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256333908283223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04420076951051339
mentalhealth,Beagtr0ll,2020/01/17,"I am scared for no reason, my head is full. Help I am really scared and can't focus at all.",-0.7042857142857137,0.7008702380952414,2.5526190476190465,95.4632142857143,84.71428571428572,6.104761904761905,10.5,7.1686216300943375,-1.0008285714285714,69,0,18,1,2,25,18,21,0.324,0.5670000000000001,0.109,-0.6486,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,4,1,1,1,1,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,4,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884706562838101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537139335530633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24248956289910045,0.3891815355560144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7579289764844219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Galifrae,2020/01/17,"Hey everyone. Recently I found a page on TikTok of this woman claiming that she’s being hunted and followed by the Illuminati. I knew right away from her speech and her dialogue that she’s most likely schizophrenic, and now I’m trying to figure out how to get her help. I’m not sure if this is the right place for this, or if I can even help her in any way, but she most certainly needs it. 

She posts videos regularly on TikTok where she says the government, Illuminati and military are all harming her, so much so that it’s gotten to a point where she gets thousands of views and likes from people who seem to believe her (there are handfuls that can see it’s a mental illness). I’m honestly worried about her, she clearly has nobody to help her, and it seems, after looking it up, that something major happened to her in 2014 that spurred all this on, as that’s the date she always goes back to.

This is her TikTok name: user2864263151458

This is her TikTok page: https://vm.tiktok.com/4RFTqv/

Here’s the page I found after doing some digging where she is clearly speaking to herself in multiple personalities. I’m not sure what website this is:

https://www.pscp.tv/2442MamaPig/1lDxLodjYNzJm

You can watch any one of those and see that she never names the main speaker but refers to the victim as Isis, which is actually her real name (Isis “Feather” Van Natta). She even has an IMDB page from when she was in a Paranormal show for a bit back in 2016. 

I’m worried people are feeding into her mental illness, and not seeing it for what it is, and hoping there’s some way we can help her, but I honestly have no clue. 

Be warned, her videos can be a bit disturbing, especially if you’ve never seen someone have an episode like this. It’s unnerving, to say the least.",6.427670527670529,7.212340681681685,6.0795709995710006,79.71837837837839,65.6066066066066,8.865379665379669,29.971256971256967,8.841846274778883,2.274032003432004,1409,47,260,21,21,437,164,333,0.086,0.802,0.11199999999999999,0.8901,1,0,1,0,0,0,50.0,1,1,0,0,16,12,1,1,16,0,24,5,1,1,9,49,46,22,0,5,10,0,1,3,0,0,3,5,0,2,29,12,1,0,7,3,0,1,6,3,0,2,6,13,35,9,37,37,16,33,0,0,7,0,44,19,0,11,13,189,64,1,0.0,0.0,0.11234997128176696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957971262054994,0.0,0.0,0.1565842764200627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081681350360503,0.17705525251934268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297117372318266,0.0,0.0,0.2513836096579241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208415089149374,0.0,0.0,0.11001135403747747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524675286335324,0.0,0.0,0.12030102404987253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180880600390714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086760216281663,0.0,0.0,0.1143497611436443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16873965557787374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667994473674088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320473005523044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463357027127268,0.0853672074711439,0.1775902312662907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801485856483475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15963286386241324,0.10052680589028204,0.1202860235496969,0.0,0.10883477170676753,0.0,0.11026241970559676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104279406547034,0.0,0.0,0.11367668104262164,0.0,0.0,0.1966402550281104,0.0,0.18311150335424886,0.0,0.0,0.2752303747890635,0.20961949441167235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754901402873878,0.08863246127246592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170167435380642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07816550324171624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827691805909616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338395805666666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_4RootPunch_,2020/01/17,"My friend's sadness is rubbing off on me The past few years I fell into a really bad depression, and I was really miserable. These past couple months or so, I have actually been starting to feel a lot better after some self-evalution and realizations. But at the same time, it seems that my best friend has become pretty depressed. Her relationship with her parents is not the best and she never eats breakfast or lunch (but she swears she eats a lot at home). She tells me how she doesn't get very much sleep and often ends up crying for no reason in particular. I'm really worried and sometimes I try to give advice or say nice things, but I don't think they really help. I really just want to help her if I can in any way, but her being sad is now what's making me sad again. I don't know what I should do.",5.064329268292681,5.233295310975612,6.1316097560975615,80.31217073170734,68.45121951219512,9.486829268292682,25.546341463414635,9.3871,1.8572019512195124,637,15,131,12,10,213,109,164,0.14300000000000002,0.718,0.139,-0.1858,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,3,6,13,0,1,6,0,14,5,1,3,1,32,24,15,0,3,10,1,2,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,6,7,4,0,5,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,2,3,24,6,14,20,8,21,0,6,0,0,19,8,0,9,11,94,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.12511962677997707,0.0,0.0,0.12529049649656995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719079320526056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070544107534692,0.0,0.1416037133297891,0.0,0.0,0.2691080710881637,0.11339600380990998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186777857766264,0.14083847443333453,0.0,0.0,0.220863281068994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623924992449112,0.0,0.0,0.11356068973435965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482950255355684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981176284493817,0.0,0.06698719660826409,0.12299578830639844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17188001110024356,0.0,0.12861038889626472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046376971140482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180081073604953,0.0,0.0,0.08558470101127345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234022042949427,0.0,0.0942529900505379,0.0,0.09888753509371903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14236790517094766,0.0,0.2447920024135141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044104313494714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4106899863470995,0.131826671311663,0.0,0.13765523714673153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196194399260296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672238367030335,0.13375650913584242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830788454194522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680819927113546,0.0,0.0907514414701513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120658138980409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518054082209885,0.08215518008064672,0.0,0.0,0.07476336609221787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704976495405484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579104121106142,0.07562469939202482,0.10177132847266936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13020884969125004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256644240851377
mentalhealth,NotAFrench,2020/01/17,"We're near our extinction and still shitting in clear water. We are not meant to stay, and that scare me all the time. I believe we're near our extinction, everything has gone terribly wrong and no one did anything to help. I'm going to learn to handle a knife is this could turn to be useful on day (I do not mean killing a man, I couldn't do such a thing(",2.3412000000000006,3.70525932,3.4450000000000003,92.62750000000004,75.8,7.133333333333333,23.166666666666664,7.793537801064563,0.840066666666667,279,8,64,4,6,90,55,75,0.17800000000000002,0.682,0.14,-0.4912,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,3,0,0,0,2,5,2,1,4,0,9,2,1,1,2,14,16,3,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,0,3,0,0,2,4,5,0,1,3,0,7,0,9,10,1,10,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,3,42,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21117477369514812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891206436498485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20488861602592004,0.0,0.0,0.16549740008820518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23063173884190444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14584194040605875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720056564598084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28390982944494103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795322651918107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17389101868402518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25691941574593824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634147204420305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735206762251821,0.20493549051515186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048561665686154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496360371577692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791267272855846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22163558509657005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28057153160158593,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samreturned,2020/01/17,"The only thing that would make me happy is being diagnosed with a terminal illness. Apparently this is optional but must contain text, so not optional then...",7.474444444444442,9.664622555555557,8.467592592592595,58.3991666666667,64.18518518518519,12.807407407407407,39.425925925925924,12.161744961471696,6.269237037037038,127,7,17,5,2,43,25,27,0.066,0.851,0.083,0.128,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,1,1,9,6,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4992346543706052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5236015709701164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283250439417567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3740870201910049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32677458094659145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34940820660872635,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jeannepaulino,2020/01/17,"STUDY TITLE: How Asian-American Women Develop and Recover from Eating Disorders: An Intersectional Approach IRB Number: STU00211241

My name is Jeanne Paulino and I am conducting research for my senior thesis at Northwestern University about how Asian-American women experience eating disorders. The Principal Investigator is Professor Anthony Chen, who can be reached at [anthony-chen@northwestern.edu](mailto:anthony-chen@northwestern.edu). The study number and title are IRB number STU00211241, ""How Asian-American Women Develop and Recover from Eating Disorders: An Intersectional Approach."" You are eligible to participate if you:

* Are an Asian-American woman born in the United States to at least one immigrant parent
* Are between the ages of 18 and 26
* Have experienced an eating disorder in the past

Participants will not be paid.

If you are interested, please e-mail [jeannepaulino2020@u.northwestern.edu](mailto:jeannepaulino2020@u.northwestern.edu) or comment here.",12.394511278195488,17.380667812030076,10.29545112781955,38.16994360902254,58.84962406015038,12.822556390977445,38.82330827067669,11.491704259439757,6.9143774436090215,821,39,80,30,14,250,82,133,0.02,0.883,0.09699999999999999,0.7506,1,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,3,0,0,5,1,0,0,9,0,13,4,0,3,0,13,14,11,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,5,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,1,1,6,1,13,10,1,14,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,3,4,57,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7029248401477034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6275857114953229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998765206874354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103901408625295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17025651136737024,0.0,0.1463722890756656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16831196829275752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pae913,2020/01/17,"I’m finally taking steps to improve my mental health... For years I’ve been struggling with stuff, but now that I have the resources, I can finally do something about it. Today I did the scariest part: the initial appointment at my university counseling center. It was scary at first, but I went with a friend. And now it’s too late to go back, I’ve already committed. So I guess this is the next step on that adventure. I really wanted to share this somewhere",4.337987012987013,6.166864227272729,5.135584415584418,80.63409090909094,71.5,8.664935064935065,29.61688311688312,9.23628265651192,2.70717012987013,364,15,67,8,7,118,64,88,0.068,0.767,0.165,0.8336,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,1,5,0,7,1,0,0,1,8,13,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,4,0,8,3,10,9,1,18,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,10,48,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370027632254732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16514398644994585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4705375481310101,0.0,0.18268227153984276,0.0,0.0,0.16592987843173326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205808509768867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365920982196925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22828924131239564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422686140836891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164364835997724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284091052793945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325737322250092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13758642285608702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653395510738255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245230301959718,0.245858946813642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16147944462798725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20357575468980504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667623042702755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19909287284203625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383040959920006
mentalhealth,StreEEESN,2020/01/17,"Caretakeing for my father. A rant. My father has schizophrenia, which is hard. But he is ALSO illiterate, which is very hard. So you could say I’m a full time care giver. Today i have to drive him from his house, to a town thirty minutes away to go to health and human services and figure out why the FUCK his insurance is acting up. It makes no seance and i cant get him his medications without it. (Out of pocket, his shot is 3 grand.) ever seance he was committed, i have been unable to get his health insurance information(thanks HIPPA),  i think they gave him a new one? Maybe? But we have yet to hear a word about this “new insurance.” I’m worried the drive will trigger him and make him less willing to go to the doctors appointment we have set up for his shot (you know, if i can figure out his insurance) next week.

Its just very difficult and is makeing me depressed, hearing your dad scream shut up to himself for an hour commute to a hospital is so goddamn disturbing and i feel like no matter what i do, its not enough. Yes i got him to a mental health facility, but now his insurance is fucking up. And he is now two weeks over due for his shot which means he could go back into crisis at any moment, yet i have to jump through a million hoops to get it payed for. The whole experience is leaving me very hollow. I thought i had a big enough heart to take care of him and help him, but every step forward takes me two steps back. 

My husband is being very supportive but when we were taking my father down to the mental health hospital (this was all a week before Christmas) ((mind you that we did just have a mentally ill man scream shut up to us on a hour and a half long car ride.)) my husband  screamed ‘you suck’ at me after we dropped him off. He’s apologized up and down for it but now whenever i feel like asking for help or feel myself getting emotional about it, I hear him screaming that at me. (Mind you i also have PTSD,i cant handle people screaming at me), and I almost agree with it, i do suck. I feel like my burden is now burdening all these other people, and I almost feel like they are blaming me, for my dads behavior and not being able to control him. It just suuuuuuuuuuuuucks. It makes every day suck. It makes me go to bed stressed and wake up stressed and i spend all the middle parts crying in my living room because i dont want to put my husband in position of caretaking for me, you know? Like, i have to be the strong person in our relationship eventually right? 

But i just have no strength leftover for myself. I’d give anything in the world to just relax, or even to feel less alone, but I suppose thats why I’m posting this.",3.805550414497784,5.019094796992484,4.901428571428571,84.21793040293043,71.89473684210526,7.636861384229804,26.422980528243684,8.055295364500962,1.4999336225178332,2080,68,426,29,39,684,248,532,0.14400000000000002,0.758,0.09699999999999999,-0.9715,0,1,0,0,0,0,64.0,7,7,2,3,22,30,5,3,22,1,42,11,2,7,5,78,88,31,0,4,19,8,8,5,0,2,7,9,2,3,23,25,0,1,13,1,2,14,9,17,0,5,9,17,80,13,67,72,10,76,0,1,0,2,65,35,5,5,31,300,103,3,0.06945809129412134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910449046112486,0.0719376351163884,0.0,0.11109122102678326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04723388389944232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715809092213491,0.0,0.06493393920689483,0.0,0.06525816319137613,0.10681796962614498,0.0,0.042341007766201096,0.0,0.05910371986114369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14163430642695654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790315552773876,0.11091326808405612,0.0,0.07629645178589035,0.04479472276018311,0.0,0.05982415225368853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109329963086675,0.0,0.0,0.0814043656998391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813100390238463,0.0,0.14353755124997064,0.0,0.04587641422490667,0.06282882012630539,0.11704287523642096,0.0,0.0,0.06794334124841914,0.0,0.0,0.21072058764263324,0.19848349719561265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842577233728625,0.14515594369672336,0.06663053025917759,0.15789853577916466,0.0,0.055551980725302916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444161368005405,0.0,0.0,0.29532281215549105,0.2348529508463625,0.08230817261120445,0.09311258896144482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368044573153656,0.08014531173156775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634470097846817,0.0,0.0,0.07354608972381528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16966857471299227,0.0,0.0613327671439322,0.0614682250766313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23181907644872046,0.0,0.06977998850694743,0.07566022375650322,0.0,0.06997171961701065,0.20999225792115755,0.0,0.14026574386193688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13416611478524934,0.07386946807616354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04706660025042817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521634422994865,0.0,0.09630698982808747,0.060648126194552864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652165146996121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119279177291187,0.06982456620413602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07457199608486446,0.0,0.0593168304526165,0.0,0.05523586204073525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912801780604385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882021888494767,0.0,0.0,0.15667152146118693,0.0,0.0,0.06394767847475663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0445059403064694,0.0,0.05514196594344646,0.040501571600776096,0.0,0.06583814902538422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357009250779105,0.0,0.08354953167761461,0.0,0.0,0.2292407982297337,0.040968181842364663,0.0,0.1671452735659894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253502477558914,0.07754747843844506,0.0,0.066955121389765,0.0,0.0,0.07053806328516543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatbroadsharli,2020/01/17,"Don’t you hate how admitting your mental illness basically turns people away? I told someone (who is a new friend that I really value and hope to grow our friendship) about my BPD and eating disorder. I was hesitant because why would I do that; it has never worked well in the past. But 2020 is the year of me being honest with myself and about myself, so I did. They said the need time to process it.

That was over 24 hours ago. I haven’t heard anything. And I know it’s my dumb brain thinking the worst (that I’ll literally never hear from them), and I hate that I said something and I hate that they will want to cut ties and I hate myself.

It’s hard man. I don’t have friends; I ran them off when I was REALLY struggling, and now that I’m better I’m afraid to let anyone close. I was actually going to try with this one, and now this.

Not to mention my breakup is officially official; it’s what’s best, and we will still be friends, but it hurts a little. 3 years is a long time.

Idk, I’m just rambling now, to strangers, but I needed to get it out. Thanks for coming to my TEDTalk.",2.1903171992481205,3.817749897321427,3.4945018796992464,91.0070770676692,76.8125,6.5015037593984975,22.503759398496236,7.273561745256523,0.6198160714285712,843,24,187,10,19,275,132,224,0.14300000000000002,0.759,0.099,-0.7777,0,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,2,2,4,3,11,19,6,2,7,0,21,3,1,1,2,32,46,16,0,5,5,0,1,0,3,3,1,4,0,1,18,16,1,0,3,0,0,4,6,10,1,1,10,5,32,9,21,30,2,27,0,1,0,0,20,7,1,1,16,127,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.11801823667092287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720441641273326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845628006881562,0.0,0.09952183316776003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11362541899473245,0.0,0.0,0.07372280359753669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691717854780615,0.10696000906962806,0.0,0.0,0.1523174279876387,0.13500702673847495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041775498313436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13860565363863572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12374996982294607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803096576223503,0.0,0.06318521743305668,0.0,0.06873196550885026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833687161336884,0.4776057343663712,0.0,0.0,0.13630613978417802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011891965747433,0.11909976486175156,0.0,0.12946684332389888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06646447135867571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366750228264373,0.0,0.0,0.12121184699450585,0.0,0.10702650040443884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187725961561954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17934828429992253,0.18654998933168748,0.11680286619976392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195085354193994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544919537999487,0.08384331964145741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495221414725818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300798436199461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247054354634462,0.09310413408959954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658140193698056,0.0,0.0,0.1264308640842695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113436450720524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749231464341033,0.0,0.0,0.14104007278254185,0.0,0.0,0.11556163182919073,0.0,0.08210909852346135,0.1315460322248568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133248316597175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087379649873173,0.0,0.10912791385644527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804444923292727,0.0,0.0,0.08591102667723301,0.0,0.0,0.15576047007204616
mentalhealth,mattban96,2020/01/17,"Why do I feel weird as hell after talking about my problems? I have adhd among other problems, anyway today I had a complete breakdown and afterwards talked about some of the things going on with me, after talking about em I felt weird doing so, I still do a little right now, what do you think might be the reason for this?",4.009047619047621,5.74372704761905,4.495428571428572,85.27457142857145,72.17460317460319,5.674920634920635,23.711111111111112,5.6839178017228535,0.592354920634921,256,7,46,1,5,81,49,63,0.212,0.7879999999999999,0.0,-0.9146,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,7,5,1,0,4,0,8,0,0,1,0,10,12,3,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,2,8,0,11,8,1,11,1,0,0,0,4,4,1,2,6,41,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26453509645303896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23078607668207105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129660679325902,0.0,0.21134463205004064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509625741682528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061275712595574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335069138706221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4212400844220743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263145732102088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879767524083611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17578388496442252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5307595778455527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623442699537034,0.14104061288934672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20864299970066116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19861928146648425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heterosexual_sapiens,2020/01/17,"Just got out of the hospital I voluntarily admitted myself to a behavioral health unit  (on Monday) as a result of having suicidal ideation, and I’m certain it was the best possible decision. It kind of sucked while there, because I don’t like being told what to do, the food was kind of eh, and the shower water never got hot. Also, couldn’t use my phone or electronics. (Not that I disagree with any of these things, I know why these things are the way they are.) 

I attended group therapy each day, talked about my problems, and helped others with theirs. I also went to the adolescent program involved given I’m still in highschool, and I found a lot of friends by giving advice and just being myself. (Also met a girl with the same exact problems as me, but I’m going to keep it strictly platonic as it’s likely just attachment as a coping method due to our similarity.)

I just got out today, and I’m relatively tired from poor sleep, but I’m genuinely happier and more appreciative of my surroundings and what I have. I got some medication to assist my coping methods and therapy as time goes on, which I was reluctant of, but accepting of now.",6.5428029504741865,6.84828238812786,7.467671232876714,71.52793466807167,65.30136986301369,10.939374780470672,32.8278890059712,10.727762888450028,3.627795644538111,909,35,162,23,13,306,131,219,0.09300000000000001,0.787,0.12,0.7264,1,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,1,0,2,1,11,11,1,0,12,0,12,6,1,2,3,41,33,22,1,3,9,0,1,2,1,0,3,0,1,1,13,15,2,1,5,0,1,3,4,3,0,0,12,1,21,8,31,18,6,19,0,0,0,0,14,6,1,3,11,121,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054637561681695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.320504889102718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084840716880524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143757819430128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14019851589762944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615698893181449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16154222800314505,0.14647877400327786,0.10321428625104864,0.0,0.0,0.12815540546583412,0.07592447034613366,0.0,0.4273888613276222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420040279879219,0.0,0.0,0.08954514954264448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874436265602853,0.0,0.2782348982239903,0.07341969267696036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13053442560084513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357672396075835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458176100023642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030358220387388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15060700635957458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556625670401953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369034171295288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066882306225926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461300016738896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737768568830396,0.0,0.0,0.3055524476316968,0.0,0.17750765123210688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789965516274787,0.1535464917153049,0.12663136028856614,0.12765466001167144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538220323632943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604058923319276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12384284833015112,0.12054768109988405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vthicci,2020/01/17,"am i crazy? honestly if it was legal i would probably kill someone, but i don’t have like the urge to kill people just whenever i get mad i want to hurt people but i feel like that’s normal",0.8118292682926835,2.680871097560974,3.373353658536587,89.13368902439026,81.92682926829268,7.0268292682926825,20.006097560975608,8.07648339933343,0.8880682926829273,149,4,33,3,4,52,31,41,0.369,0.424,0.207,-0.9153,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,8,3,2,4,4,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,6,3,2,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,20,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368509915701928,0.19335554991621226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414057476497703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28974112173417504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5988779623277724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644561268268966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651838363119036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37527535018456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918112088093342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22932458589069435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596389713224561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922651128252326,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ballsonthewa11s,2020/01/17,"I don't know what to do anymore (tw:s*icide) I don't know what to do at this point. My mental health has gone to shit in the last 5 months. I'm having anxiety and panic attacks daily and I can't sleep, eat, or take care of my daily responsibilities like going to work, showering, or brushing my teeth/hair. I've been on an SSRI and mood stabilizer for almost a year but I see no change. If anything, my state has being getting worse every day. I'm so tired of trying so hard every single day only to feel worse. I've tried psychotherapy, but I've not had a good therapist who can actually help me tackle my biggest problems. I have auditory hallucinations daily and visual hallucinations a few times a week. I can never tell if I'm dreaming or not and I constantly have to ask my partner if this is ""actually for real."" I'm so tired of doing everything that I can just to make it through another day. I want to give up so badly, but I know that I can't. Things haven't been looking up, and I've called the suicide hotline every day this week. I've considered going into a walk-in clinic, but I don't know how much they'd be able to help me. Can they prescribe anti anxiety medications or tranquilizers to help with sleep?",3.452348178137651,4.871333829959518,5.5795951417004055,78.21408906882594,73.04858299595142,8.114979757085022,26.36032388663968,8.6894789155246,1.93940971659919,964,33,189,18,19,337,136,247,0.217,0.721,0.062,-0.9914,1,0,0,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,2,1,6,10,2,1,8,0,25,9,3,2,1,34,46,22,1,5,14,0,2,1,1,0,5,0,1,1,10,8,1,0,5,1,0,3,10,5,0,0,4,5,22,4,23,39,3,24,0,0,2,0,11,8,1,8,13,117,32,1,0.10929589301815693,0.0,0.21331405092722025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944404909864762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460627351400265,0.16722211800575096,0.0,0.10839215719146847,0.0,0.0,0.0899412073403243,0.0,0.10217690611093633,0.12433985677557112,0.0,0.0,0.09125750537765977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160332678495367,0.0,0.11143444712143756,0.0,0.11562056269497124,0.0,0.0,0.11811003227528755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819472366923125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183698430717903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762595112830298,0.0,0.09822810120485448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05526328748412173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057102593080359476,0.10484657973269844,0.12423074945412314,0.09167220955510842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790765224305213,0.0,0.0,0.11617642337192917,0.0,0.0,0.2197761996945707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402646578729713,0.08909074033831732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0533964525798706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178102326119986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295585728613795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010411370466974,0.11014455349391647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723893906345012,0.0,0.08034505711497499,0.0,0.08429573057368067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083124451701872,0.0,0.1282351813411175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331994645679747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458140888560656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12440265417078684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709467614849938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219066355895216,0.0,0.0,0.21874965040995795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955196752060075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217690950794011,0.0,0.09552942790935756,0.0,0.0,0.1269009557742986,0.07261133481034783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06373131415317629,0.25123910189799586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840947397697474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644655494610526,0.0,0.17534114550505558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956871182502155,0.0,0.22276370478973775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703829716970817
mentalhealth,mudskipper95,2020/01/17,"What causes to make me feel worse after a 1:30 hour workout? (Kickboxing for example) Everytime i do a 1:30 workout i kind of am depressive.
But after 1 hour max. I feel very good?",-0.08999999999999986,1.8011440000000007,2.5428571428571445,85.73714285714289,109.0,6.571428571428572,22.142857142857146,7.447530270364453,1.9667142857142847,140,6,26,4,7,48,27,35,0.172,0.738,0.091,-0.4342,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,5,5,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,2,5,5,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147555781491545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26390050973997525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098484942769325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569924572968172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6034814478796015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31906680404363874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20452332423480574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528107847207127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122461658134393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kikoshi-Tasukete,2020/01/17,"Why is my Anxiety get so bad that I have full breakdowns when it’s night time or I’m getting close to going to sleep? I don’t know if there is a reason for my anxiety to get so bad that it makes me completely shutdown, cry, lose surroundings awareness, be very jumpy and everything sounding very loud and fast. These types of anxiety attacks only hit me when it’s night time or close to me going to sleep and they happen every night. Do anyone have an idea what it could be or what I could try? きこし",2.430196078431376,4.3009192745098055,3.5221568627450983,89.99637254901963,76.84313725490195,6.886274509803924,23.098039215686285,7.793537801064563,1.023168627450981,394,12,83,6,9,127,64,102,0.22399999999999998,0.7759999999999999,0.0,-0.9705,0,0,0,0,1,0,7.0,0,0,1,1,5,4,1,0,2,0,10,2,2,2,0,15,20,11,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,9,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,4,0,0,0,2,9,0,7,15,1,14,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,4,8,50,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502192957495791,0.0,0.0,0.10670254935315418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736062892192545,0.0,0.0,0.2548318340211294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999981795589358,0.0,0.0,0.2436798348794217,0.0,0.16762563302148448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857338442957542,0.0,0.13714843003244115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391840286748493,0.0,0.17345395096107696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494504344089167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722685710769176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386581898503379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072209637390198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186271714239507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4296186411414115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606035246923628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689980537379708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30542350667355056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779663777025236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036064329261238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518245148899298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376991599061949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OMG365,2020/01/17,"Why do I feel old at 21? I just turned 21 this month. Like  literally 5 days ago. I know that 21 is supposed to be young, and I'm gen Z and this is supposed to some of the best times in my life, but I can't help but feel so old and dejected. Like I've already failed in life. I'm a junior in school so I know I'm not behind in college but in high school it was always get things done early and be successful as fast as possible or else you're going to fall behind. Now that I'm officially no longer a teenager or that limbo year of 20, I can't help but feel like I've failed. Like if I didn't succeed by now then everything else is just a downhill and the older I get the less chance I have of being successful. My question is it common to feel like this or should I probably try to go talk to somebody?",1.5815665584415584,2.7258150625000006,3.5935389610389628,91.68977272727275,77.35227272727273,6.846753246753247,22.23051948051948,7.447530270364453,0.5909201298701299,625,17,149,8,14,213,96,176,0.134,0.708,0.158,0.5513,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,6,6,11,0,0,6,0,15,2,0,0,0,25,30,18,0,2,11,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,7,0,0,3,5,2,0,0,3,4,12,9,20,23,3,25,0,2,0,0,4,7,0,6,20,87,21,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298727955272625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16167807608897558,0.0,0.12190854519134553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153753822183752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448720816547304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993119799969176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24478159139975006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167426863446607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963206199672869,0.20933438540670046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530914695237185,0.0,0.16653068598128254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19640591645421315,0.15479647926782492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16103677418214318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20696952101280325,0.35788836162405313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694335283617238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074764308703188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516867334277385,0.0,0.0,0.1579631928779884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16412538808273108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.296553071958192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775966019410235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733512394569616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854315015489494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947107143804902,0.15936144719810552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322030165998969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434801455854212
mentalhealth,scamitup,2020/01/17,"Who do I turn to? I am having a real sucky week. I have had worse - multiplied by 100x before, many many times so I can recognize when I am about to spiral down. Despite having a thick emotional support system and therapist, I didn't feel like speaking to them. I    googled - ' talk to someone' (when dull). It's 1 AM here in India. To my surprise, there's no chat room. There was nothing convenient enough or even free to login to and just rant. Now, I was very stable at the moment. So it's okay maybe. But it did make me wonder what if there's someone super vulnerable and just wants to talk it out with a stranger or share some words. Who will they turn to?

I turned to reddit and also to this idea. WE NEED WORKING HELP LINE NUMBERS AND CHAT ROOMS.",1.7819999999999998,3.975891866666668,2.9419999999999997,91.781,80.33333333333334,5.6000000000000005,21.333333333333336,6.742157984588678,0.4031333333333329,580,17,121,6,15,186,103,150,0.10300000000000001,0.7509999999999999,0.146,0.823,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,2,2,14,8,0,0,4,1,14,0,0,1,0,23,23,14,0,3,6,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,8,8,0,0,3,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,5,3,14,8,18,17,2,14,0,1,0,0,12,7,0,5,7,83,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856644812594914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680208504948124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18084283469748674,0.0,0.16611675491851846,0.0,0.10618602577478226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812893441678725,0.11485299202852595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775968369002142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18148797841959005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854332973505633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731416935156128,0.32598789042351034,0.1615134875589288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920774702315252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15426163582133673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18298965969390565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724371226650839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18243809886839646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25843913387240863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866645279134513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374535910403203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5246096284412676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265078429036528,0.09482538002496096,0.0,0.12895872986062182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743464945663971,0.1170413251726448,0.0,0.16383675574825535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LT_L,2020/01/17,How do I find out if i have schizophrenia ? Who would I go to if i want to know if I have schizophrenia ?,0.4978260869565218,1.8223990000000043,1.7210869565217382,103.2059782608696,80.73913043478261,4.6000000000000005,20.195652173913047,3.1291,-0.8100260869565221,79,2,21,0,2,25,14,23,0.0,0.9109999999999999,0.08900000000000001,0.168,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,9,7,4,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,3,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,17,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6009778511283489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37369401791488654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36136570759662395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3878329689073939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4670961539441832,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Brett_Stewie,2020/01/17,How did you mentally reset yourself? I’m looking for a way to restart my brain. Get it feeling fresh and ready for work and self improvement.,2.782222222222224,5.519985740740744,3.216296296296296,88.03333333333335,80.48148148148148,6.562962962962962,31.222222222222207,7.793537801064563,2.4020222222222225,113,6,21,2,3,35,25,27,0.0,0.693,0.307,0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,4,5,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,11,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4657877748189686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21097358526109455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21799533358072845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3503839966435357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4204887621691094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4352816105766773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3311927625377957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037621750815108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Capable-Cup,2020/01/17,"I feel like I'm not worth it Sorry if this is too long. I've struggled with depression and anxiety for a few years. I was diagnosed a couple of years ago and my boyfriend has seen it all. We've been together for over 2 years and I wanna spend the rest of my life with him. But I feel like I don't deserve it.
We've been through a lot together. But in my eyes, I'm clingy, unstable. He's seen me self harm, think about attempting as well as actually attempt. I used to do this a lot, and he saw me go get help. Therapy and medication are now part of my daily life. I got better for a while, but it was never perfect. My family left me with an abused mental state, I've suffered with eating disorders and lately I've had a breakdown almost every night for weeks. 
The other night, I told him he should break up with me. I even tried to break up with him because I don't want to hurt him. I don't want him to be brought down with me. I feel like such a burden.
He said if I loved him, I needed to let him in. That he was fine, the happiest he's ever been, and there was no way he was leaving me. That he could never move on from me because he wants to marry me. I'm 20. I feel like I'm too old for this, for the breakdowns, the self harm. I was better for a while and now I feel so defeated. Like I'm just a toxic person who is sucking the life out of him. I don't know what to so.
Should I leave? I want him for the rest of my life, but am I selfish for not letting him go? Should I believe him when he says I'm not a burden? I'm so confused.",0.4508732582553918,1.9954641923076968,2.7664000763504504,94.64869917923271,81.63313609467455,6.018095056308455,20.074823439587707,6.968188349444268,0.152782668448177,1179,31,288,14,31,404,153,338,0.165,0.7190000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.9434,0,0,0,0,1,0,41.0,0,0,0,6,15,23,1,2,18,0,27,9,1,1,5,53,59,22,0,12,10,0,5,5,0,3,6,2,0,3,12,16,1,0,7,0,2,4,10,12,1,0,17,11,47,11,42,35,7,35,0,4,4,1,30,9,1,6,23,189,59,0,0.0,0.1163042016234124,0.09579053796316728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701340580809762,0.0,0.0982936125816076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07509255285099033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11967552161370118,0.0,0.0,0.11059332679678326,0.0,0.17363006088446764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837321259058108,0.10861278265712146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454553875513499,0.09963089301919187,0.0,0.0,0.11250049569714124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044274949912303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483411817272061,0.08879183819275009,0.08270449786192448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253703143378854,0.0,0.2481646199444839,0.2805036690406548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051284836479203316,0.0,0.11157380650783352,0.0,0.07850795978552341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579494821128379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508290006882366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05394647171892274,0.0,0.1107293771201658,0.20787570052528684,0.10665172589419104,0.20075162799198645,0.2773348005435706,0.2397814347305082,0.0,0.0,0.0868689987179095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16690518044076924,0.08859372973689772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888642813619923,0.09892274781744127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043291310983878,0.0,0.07278480479150133,0.15141493670111894,0.0,0.0,0.1842340551032923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300298591065704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062983110758684,0.0,0.0,0.08571000691934991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337316255745284,0.0780612100449838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048057254634978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988270034118697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261872086387576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225514486512957,0.0,0.0,0.06289731754255379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937966130750282,0.0,0.06664457071295067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847791993783287,0.0,0.0,0.23159054496873385,0.0779152763999716,0.07873847307291462,0.0,0.08825812397281366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18963652960517216
mentalhealth,SleeperOfWomen,2020/01/17,"I keep thinking about killing others and myself even though I don’t want to. I’d like to state that I would never wish any emotional or physical harm on anyone or anything and I never have, this is just a matter of obsession.

For a while, I’ve been constantly thinking about killing myself and killing others even though I don’t want to. I’ve just been scared of doing these things, never actually wanting to do them. I just keep thinking about how maybe one day I’ll snap and I’ll suddenly want to do these things. And right now I feel like I’m really close to snapping. Again, I’d like to say that I wish for no harm to come to anyone. I’m happy but I’m just scared, if that makes sense. I’m sorry if my English is jumbled I just felt like I should share it as to not make it worse. Any advice is good, thanks :)",2.44240067624683,4.015070082840239,3.5012890955198657,91.46060650887577,75.98224852071006,6.4853761622992385,22.130600169061708,7.1686216300943375,0.5406209636517332,640,17,140,7,14,206,87,169,0.154,0.662,0.185,0.7616,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,1,0,15,16,3,3,2,0,13,0,0,3,3,40,34,15,3,10,11,0,2,4,0,2,0,1,0,0,12,7,0,2,5,0,0,1,7,8,0,1,3,3,14,8,19,29,0,14,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,4,13,89,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.11544496749874475,0.0,0.0,0.11560262500929082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089783108882966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654379874233836,0.0,0.09735185950544087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190606294104593,0.0,0.12784163797956666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629452779791404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330729979293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15627373693500918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05981667311409264,0.08451444590521204,0.1135877645689478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992254866158668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12593389423719514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21030319628917787,0.3926484590660073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311840858428821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793402331691414,0.0,0.1188495194262848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737236811375852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016399745086672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578681833710231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102863219133372,0.0,0.0940779125806871,0.23688040411517386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324285784305788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891590866906947,0.0,0.0,0.15718820491728613,0.2274080175512857,0.2324607804441804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791085999246855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720812281458696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055909372854913,0.08403782298655997,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SirReginaldTheIII,2020/01/17,"I cannot show emotions like I used to. Does anyone have any idea what it is? I started to notice this trend within the past few years. I found myself sitting situations I should feel joy, sadness, or even anger but I literally cannot bring myself to do it. Call it a lack of energy, the best way I can describe it is ""Emotional Autopilot"". I'm still a pleasant person to be around and I have great friends, but I do not know how to explain to them why I don't show any emotion from ""fine"". 

For Example, 

I recently was told that a few of my professors showed interest in my research proposal and wanted to help me see my idea through. For an undergraduate student, this is a big deal. I should've been ecstatic, but really I  just felt fine. I could say that I was happy because things were going good but I didn't feel it. 

Just wondering if this is the result of some sort of underlying thing or if it is a specific thing on its own.",2.7087765957446805,4.481190143617023,4.4329255319148935,84.20875000000002,75.75531914893618,8.104255319148937,26.11170212765957,8.841846274778883,1.9726851063829791,729,27,151,16,16,246,117,188,0.043,0.708,0.248,0.9931,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,1,6,13,1,0,9,0,21,0,0,3,0,32,36,11,0,6,11,0,3,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,16,3,0,0,9,3,0,2,5,2,0,0,8,5,23,11,20,25,6,15,0,1,1,0,9,6,0,7,6,111,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919927613980653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870517156945986,0.0,0.0,0.125665914660142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860522820727204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148142939705491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14414425708134565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127079908380838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553391579875044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235335933977902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4763715986797862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932375100556288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427535495177642,0.0,0.13553960568048726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15477907199207908,0.10906297892624787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022677102282222,0.11840169036168953,0.0,0.15563384074393122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502717342091604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461927328318788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31871401324996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758005878878584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896561428438018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16071618307768565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13475703908579892,0.0,0.12325898550392145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043329193219916,0.0,0.1393824488570657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225930207200834,0.0,0.0,0.11248945484713264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15867428356377028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999166265622298,0.0,0.11273377621164606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813493256905365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488827952389015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192039742851,0.0,0.0,0.08326220196203825,0.11204943587689743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737857985498716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15308636820795846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090500667602862
mentalhealth,Sorkka_IX,2020/01/17,"This might be a weird one? Hello people of mental health. First of all, english is not my native tounge so i beg for forgivness of the upcoming grammatical errors. 

I have a weird situation right now and i don't quite know how to explain. 

I am alone. Not forever alone i might add, but i am alone. I am used of being alone. I am used of being ignored and not really care about that fact. Since being lonley is a part of who i am. 

Now, im in uni. And im in the second semester or whatever it's called in english. My second half year of my first year. 

A couple a days ago a girl i've barely spoken to, added me on facebook and it was such a weird sensation, like, why the hell are you adding me? We've spoken twice and then for less than three minutes each time?

Well we started talking and holy shit it's draining. She writes a small essay in each reply and i feel like an asshole if i don't do the same. She's so nice and i just can't keep up with it. I just don't care and it's so draining to pretend to care. She have had a rich life with alot to talk about, and i have nothing. 

Thing is, i can't talk to women. And no i don't hate women. I just find it to be draining as heck unless it's on a proffessional level, I.E. work.",0.11595417789757435,2.0629514943396217,2.4391846361186005,94.43176886792456,85.0,5.295148247978436,18.143530997304573,6.5431188927421005,-0.15140161725067405,946,23,220,10,28,322,139,265,0.168,0.746,0.085,-0.9543,0,4,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,1,0,4,13,16,3,0,16,0,28,3,1,3,2,44,39,21,0,1,10,0,1,2,0,2,2,0,0,3,11,17,0,2,5,1,1,0,10,7,1,8,2,1,27,9,30,30,7,21,1,0,0,0,17,10,3,5,13,156,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048219183868901,0.0,0.0,0.4898873517884813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074696437790923,0.0,0.3616927453149616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13084191032088424,0.0,0.07626177894081924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05979099725323812,0.08447816870956927,0.0,0.0,0.10807879920816728,0.2011676009268576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674787052643325,0.0,0.12569473382700694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554616271305841,0.0,0.0,0.10510646260524792,0.0,0.0,0.06498737296012554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352381325165077,0.11554242589903865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916867409138646,0.25089015106785983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346452770766595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012958765277976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280537497041864,0.0,0.08197999581385637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577394445007184,0.0,0.0,0.07575428741050734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098526640438134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138242153291393,0.09781802153541257,0.13291849743519432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369830052585392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851357770506204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856036652627411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895280760437335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204260900618926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632138556283646,0.0,0.106702668255309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860877600077716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229886816357313
mentalhealth,Yellow-socks1989,2020/01/17,"Classroom anxiety I’m 30 years old and up until the end of 2011 I was in education and enjoyed it. Recently I went on a course that was in a classroom setting and I spent most of it feeling anxious and trapped, the course was only for 3 days so I just went along with the feelings of anxiety even though they were very unpleasant.   


on Monday I went to an induction to another course that I am doing and I felt anxious and trapped again. This course will last for 3 weeks and I’ll have to attend 5 days a week, so going along with the feelings of anxiety could make me quite ill. I really want to do the course because it will help me to develop a career and I actually love learning. How can I make my time on the course more bareable?",2.6349974186886937,4.505766067114094,4.085369127516781,86.18677336086733,76.24832214765101,7.537635518843572,27.568921011874032,8.384062270229773,1.947409499225606,580,24,119,11,13,192,86,149,0.147,0.762,0.091,-0.7626,0,2,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,7,2,0,0,11,0,12,2,0,3,0,24,26,13,0,2,1,0,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,12,0,0,5,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,9,4,14,2,22,14,2,25,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,1,13,82,20,4,0.0,0.0,0.15272675325887602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410962129132575,0.35917874671281674,0.35361324570190505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09540427608649103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495687523990745,0.0,0.0,0.2018661492909368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13861738471667856,0.0,0.0,0.10337038061869246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23740158986736776,0.0,0.15026978540868507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894565986897206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049023111761738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757283880885226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125228847773494,0.0,0.20893722033025125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16422615373716032,0.0,0.0,0.11902945511247763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664628218741854,0.0,0.0,0.10026140554434942,0.0,0.15453026127922104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15376582031455865,0.0,0.09125959259811718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291333954860149,0.09231097551651893,0.0,0.2510784802902273,0.0,0.0,0.4352463895194991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007843853255985
mentalhealth,cudiidkdifja,2020/01/17,"Overworrying about everything i do, and ive had this recurring worry that im a pedo and it makes me feel horrible and i would never want to hurt anyone, this thought had never crossed my mind ever before my anxiety problems and i feel like im putting others in danger if i dont get like corrected but i know its my anxiety and not me being a pedo so i cant just tell a therapists yea im a pedo even though im not, i really dont want to hurt anyone and hate how i feel about myself.",0.91057142857143,2.7168191523809533,4.1259523809523815,84.18321428571429,81.28571428571429,7.628571428571428,21.92857142857143,8.548686976883017,1.4988857142857146,381,12,81,9,10,139,60,105,0.191,0.7190000000000001,0.09,-0.7959,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,8,7,2,0,4,1,9,0,0,2,4,27,19,11,0,5,5,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,5,0,0,2,7,5,0,0,3,3,15,2,5,14,0,7,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,6,56,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082802503124764,0.0,0.0,0.19037243770953208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158377690029104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190899026971645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991348575270096,0.12313861749505693,0.0,0.0,0.1223460972188066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20649633231928147,0.09725227766142114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112302201470579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440154414154815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914628934419945,0.0,0.5881809578272206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748142406037803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301382187673574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086874630301917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745387663139574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099858089772008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13025933578939874,0.0,0.1368496262111009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720924122559998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898481728645716,0.0,0.0,0.15805901246062687,0.0,0.0,0.1337483794812047,0.10807310146180198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058761769561605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13824801382952334,0.0,0.09670381918277793,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elloryember,2020/01/17,"Seeking help means you don’t need it? Does anyone else get this? I have anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, and the desire to self harm. But I don’t like asking for more help than I’m already getting because part of me is always saying “if you’re asking for help, you don’t really need help. You’re taking away from resources other people need more. You’re just faking. Doing it for attention. “ Does anyone else experience this? I feel so guilty whenever I seek help and it makes me so sad thinking that I’m leeching off the NHS for mental health services others need far more than me. Is this a valid point or just my sad self-loathing self speaking?",3.332857142857143,5.7407425238095255,3.86373015873016,86.0632142857143,76.14285714285714,6.4222222222222225,23.99206349206349,7.492282038375204,1.2140920634920636,522,17,96,7,12,164,79,126,0.201,0.67,0.129,-0.9235,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,0,4,6,0,0,3,0,7,1,0,1,0,18,23,7,1,6,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,2,9,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,3,10,1,11,22,4,4,0,3,0,0,13,4,0,2,1,53,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13954868319349648,0.0,0.10522253457620864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673942465183394,0.0,0.0,0.17684365239582242,0.2591407250765493,0.0,0.0,0.2364408543022161,0.0,0.11881071781275855,0.0,0.0,0.07708714557081997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891741544971624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22132712503997146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21127755584526547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369942317635835,0.0,0.0,0.06394056838101969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213735279998765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441810795294182,0.0,0.0,0.4238080337731429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061780608482042636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441117410795586,0.0,0.0,0.13774898119676174,0.0,0.0,0.12743913138533716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3750656954171202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369408425273101,0.0,0.08766951161577602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954294437228853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101173114426752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056385434601857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3957673689571257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832367024008044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508008916847407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810286783468983,0.0,0.10039290465676694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Riannan_Rayne,2020/01/17,"I make Youtube videos about Mental Health - Just trying to help! Hello Internet :)

I wanted to share that I make Youtube videos about Mental Health & relationships for millennials!

I just wanted to share in case something I say can help someone, anyone on here because that is what I'm out to do. 

I've had my own issues with mental health over the last year and am so lucky and grateful to have been able to go to a therapist and continue to work on my issues and I feel helping others is my true calling and makes me feel truly fulfilled! 

[Mental Health Video](https://youtu.be/nAZVSPADFq0)",4.728888888888889,7.374531888888887,4.355333333333334,83.07300000000002,72.7037037037037,6.912592592592592,25.61481481481481,7.908726449838941,1.6539081481481481,476,16,81,7,10,144,69,108,0.0,0.738,0.262,0.9822,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,2,0,8,4,0,3,1,18,17,6,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,10,4,17,15,1,9,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,3,51,14,1,0.1290277374048684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980149957095564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021919403780773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865411112984715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175174605624493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13048060176326015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332943661256205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5486018050094478,0.0,0.0,0.2594537177835229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26934287078418384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517482708767543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583810499036517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5201184466255689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13852750269008793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260803557852337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932478319231108,0.09933185597917543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981114793904388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760136409478174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522078050295895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393372954367996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308963254819368
mentalhealth,SausageSlam,2020/01/17,"All I'm good for is alienating other people. No matter how hard I try, I will always drive people away from me. Partners, friends, family, everyone. 

I'll lose my friends because I'm such a terrible, awkward, unlikable person. Same thing goes for partners.

I'll lose my family because I'm transgender. I'm just waiting for the day for it to happen. Whenever I come out, I'll lose the most of them.

The only people who'll be left will leave in due time. That's really all it is. A matter of time.",1.4818181818181806,3.8965925353535376,3.772525252525252,84.04545454545458,83.24242424242425,7.236363636363637,23.141414141414145,8.296473431620573,1.7787898989898991,387,14,74,9,11,133,62,99,0.174,0.7140000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.6486,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,3,3,8,0,1,5,0,6,0,0,1,2,11,13,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,0,3,6,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,0,1,7,3,11,9,4,10,0,3,0,0,7,4,0,1,4,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011154503065087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15820521056627534,0.0,0.0,0.20529440982259708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14505056485741466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859574036354756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16090107705360418,0.0,0.0,0.3174807178406282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601908903849548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123509893822214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489041443303166,0.0,0.15084175475277342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17829761124229734,0.18295306198609185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5651462335473331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280659669628869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502152112389718,0.14702910878630487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787307929757348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186889795441148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19637572833838576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432377839604232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,summerfellxx,2020/01/17,"How to tell the difference between a dream you want and a delusion?lf E.g many people have dreams of being on film, making it big. E.g I want to be a singer...then  a dancer...then actress.  But how do I know if what i want is REALLY what I want and not some weird delusion I'm having or some self-fulfilling prophecy? How do I know its REALLY a dream I want? So often I chase something I thought I wanted and found it unsuitable. How do we find out then?",0.996451612903229,3.209463752688176,2.6283978494623668,92.78259677419355,83.51612903225806,5.870537634408603,20.052688172043013,7.1686216300943375,0.44264817204301066,351,10,76,5,10,115,59,93,0.0,0.8079999999999999,0.192,0.865,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,1,1,0,0,6,1,0,0,6,0,8,0,0,5,0,28,20,12,0,7,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,11,0,6,16,2,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,5,1,52,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21537501529156508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18841049115596065,0.0,0.0,0.2260245880420398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265810306565207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13760170540823238,0.20899611829336875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14291323913122328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264120301164577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21505156352791788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586985514904778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18017761268221053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636541019319289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7295290502415949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ifoughtthegreys,2020/01/17,"I need to reach out I'm sitting at work on the verge of a panic attack. It's been on and off like this for months and I feel like I'm driving myself insane.

My boss and coworker just left for an out of town job and it stresses me out that I'm not joining them. I feel embarrassed that the hour they spent packing up I felt frozen and stuck in my head and like I couldnt really think

I dont think the people I work with understand mental illness so I feel so embarrassed about my behaviors. It feels like something I should be able to control but I really cant and even of I talked to them about it I dont feel they would truely understand 

My boss is one of the most important people in my life, I want to convey my feelings for why I act the way I do since I feel like I come off as angry and frustrated at others, when really I'm just frustrated with myself and cant really internalize it anymore. I dont have a problem with anyone but myself, and my bluntness slips out when I'm communicating with others because I'm too busy being at war with myself in my head

I dont want him to think I'm weird or looking for attention, and I'm really hurting here and hes the only person I feel like I want to talk to. Every time I think about confiding in him though, I talk myself down and consider that he has too much to worry about to really listen to me. I feel too that if I do confide in anyone I'll feel so much embarrassment that I'll hurt myself over it.

I dont know what to do but I feel the longer I go without explaining myself the sooner I'm going to absolutely break down and make an idiot of myself

I want to feel important to him as he is to me, but I dont want him to misinterpret me. I dont have many friends and dont want him to look at me like this sad little girl who cant fend for herself 

I just feel like he wont care and I'm so scared of him looking negatively on me, but I dont want to go on day by day feeling this restlessness 

This is more of a rant I'm not looking for advice because I know I need help but I'm not capable myself of finding it

I just feel so trapped in my mind and i wish i could find a safe place to confide in someone who I respect without feeling such overwhelming embarrassment",4.123383214053348,4.033802677148849,5.816022554760356,82.66075471698116,70.44654088050314,9.095033615267836,27.76903057905009,8.939507131559953,1.9142712209932773,1755,54,386,30,29,606,184,477,0.18600000000000005,0.6990000000000001,0.115,-0.9935,1,1,1,0,0,2,16.0,0,0,4,3,22,31,5,9,14,0,30,4,2,4,0,95,91,35,1,16,17,0,17,8,1,3,2,1,0,2,21,27,0,2,29,0,1,6,20,19,0,1,4,22,75,12,72,80,4,46,0,4,4,0,26,30,0,3,15,263,96,5,0.0548034220834941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0535532697890188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05435026858802145,0.07663965392762245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062346804298866035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681531487024933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05587574127073939,0.0,0.0,0.047208295498306886,0.0,0.0,0.061466697896204577,0.043756073138628816,0.0,0.0,0.07068734693972761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5780628227453862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0361971434227644,0.0,0.04617424675755668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4433641098240597,0.19575787843344847,0.052619879524392565,0.0,0.10017866987322084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0423409879559412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343814314622166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248824369063763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036733578616008136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053970331443529605,0.0,0.11733639362343205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054383940111116066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06023705508756544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595440784463652,0.0,0.0387092777473113,0.2141934704177614,0.054927426303230005,0.0,0.0,0.18408428782234024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03658170979627903,0.05556206825543756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055228959557723833,0.0,0.055335833604828695,0.0,0.04374356865190012,0.0,0.08057364198786374,0.0812720861265422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037136217127486985,0.0416804720312768,0.0,0.06430000775805161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598758495665943,0.04785223429677519,0.05725791176345279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052439473570084084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21065085305106235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486778603985926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04533395707040384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046434761687517916,0.04219035177282896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277713483520729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321467442619396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14046328002362882,0.053844083944860885,0.0,0.031956316134331364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410459027080667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22627134776784916,0.043500405560552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049451564303337636,0.0,0.063021230764666,0.10565708644762133,0.0,0.07979508796478105,0.05565553534720179,0.0,0.0389307786611191,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,why_doineeda_usernam,2020/01/17,I cut up my arm and covered my face in blood after a fight with my best friend. i have bpd bipolar disorder and ocd as well as a sex and romance addiction. why did i smear the blood on my face?,2.279285714285713,2.9452902619047627,3.917619047619048,91.91071428571428,74.95238095238095,7.504761904761906,25.904761904761905,7.793537801064563,1.1284190476190483,149,5,36,2,3,50,31,42,0.19,0.5579999999999999,0.252,0.6369,0,0,0,0,1,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,6,2,0,3,0,2,8,5,0,0,4,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,7,4,7,1,1,4,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4005011710839112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38554528575441305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4627054191623968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4210521928610013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838388212016101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303210035322148,0.0,0.3315055787796146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spikey_sausage,2020/01/17,"Do I have a fear of Intimacy? I'm going to list the things that make me feel like I do, but honestly I'm not sure at this point

1. As soon as I find out that someone I like likes me back, i almost immediately lose interest in them. 
2. I try to avoid physical intimacy as much as possible because I don't feel worthy of it (although I do want it). (I have self esteem issues) 
3. Although I do really want to go out with friends, I don't allow myself to do so for no known reason.
4. I try to avoid celebrating my birthday and usually isolate myself that day. 
5. If someone I like texts me I will avoid texting back for an hour at a time sometimes despite being excited to talk to them. I also won't start conversations and will try to distance myself for no reason.",2.3243281402142166,3.8328479177215193,4.982911392405068,80.98492210321326,76.15189873417722,7.899513145082762,26.71080817916261,8.617729084823388,1.9898445959104183,593,23,122,12,13,212,92,158,0.18100000000000002,0.642,0.177,0.3142,0,3,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,1,5,14,0,4,4,0,13,0,0,4,1,23,23,12,0,3,3,0,2,4,1,3,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,3,6,0,0,2,6,5,0,0,0,2,24,9,23,19,1,16,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,2,12,86,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883454335644234,0.0,0.0,0.1268479781221007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243937249927566,0.0,0.09669299116804007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022964723972087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849106628926978,0.16040559727472173,0.11331782150363195,0.0,0.0,0.14497537368622748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254905278588675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802942647214071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15620828224006636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16555757513370975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099739540788783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17745467697266198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058797657127681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660360305475966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994672300807893,0.1788196832305893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016157304312672,0.3261745827991947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16547475988722854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687956203131165,0.0,0.156878767707762,0.0,0.11227171734455106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494970266446287,0.0,0.0,0.12749236708797784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537976529640164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924923215505448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230767395263598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469699896263255,0.0,0.18711581296922175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,foolock,2020/01/17,"Everything is unreal I can't tell the difference between what's real and what's not. (Psychosis?)
I have this constant feeling that everything is just an halliculation, or a really bad dream, i have no control over it, I'm often convinced that I'm already dead or  in a coma and that this is what afterlife is like (i don't believe in hell but the best description of this ""reality"" is hell), everything and everyone just keeps on going as if nothing happened..or maybe things have changed but everything i see is based of what reality actually used to be like a dream. 
The worst part is that I'm expected to keep on living normally, I feel manipulating by everyone, everything, basically my own mind... it's making me feel insane.

Fuck. The way i feel is really hard to explain, i don't even know why i would post this if everything is unreal, i guess to try and explain why i want to get out, why i don't want to exist, nor breath, nor anything, i just want to be where i was before birth, nowhere, but i don't even know if that's possible..",6.682230598669619,6.07362545365854,7.967937915742794,71.129822616408,65.1951219512195,12.137472283813748,35.709534368070955,11.567385478589935,4.184512195121951,818,35,159,24,11,283,107,205,0.125,0.754,0.121,-0.6953,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,7,9,3,0,8,0,21,3,1,4,0,41,44,15,1,9,12,0,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,16,5,0,3,8,2,0,1,9,5,0,0,1,6,17,4,18,40,4,12,2,0,1,1,3,7,3,7,4,107,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.1060306230870494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199023825016809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894129778516073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907215452006429,0.0,0.0,0.09245654481517204,0.12241584188661216,0.11402566163903485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494151698807475,0.0,0.0,0.11741636578129608,0.12186469154928617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352029626827045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352987452260174,0.0,0.0,0.20764709206715648,0.5859072140894451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197548930437547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044886517651767,0.05676722651769905,0.0,0.061750567831492686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969462242355755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973326354002146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931533216463684,0.0,0.0,0.11942678538677115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616570475450668,0.0,0.0959434659511082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252738366061336,0.0,0.10915753948739584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970955858508008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645784315666544,0.10425643615313633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766168554987268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249105090502027,0.10406049001249293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236720307741159,0.13921305959318414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658316448869016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949683785043718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218488458362585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376892862612583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384216360035312,0.0,0.0,0.1922608195932632,0.08624448176567588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941299843680743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718467878854056,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,missmaykdh,2020/01/17,"I am at my lowest I hate myself so much. I wanted a better life for myself. And for others. I did well, but then it all went to shit. I thought I did the right thing to take a break when I couldn't handle it anymore. But after a break I don't exist anymore. I can count on one hand how many people ignore me. 
I hate myself so much I have covered my mirrors up with blankets and I can not stand the sight of myself 

All I needed was a break from life. Because I was not myself. I needed help. And I got the help I needed. But on the other side I'm nothing but forgotten. A piece of the past of others life. 

I am alone again. Just like a year ago when I tried to to build a better life. Maybe it is time to realise some people are just better off alone. If they wanted me in their lives they would have answered me. Reached out. Anything. But that is not it. The people I love the most has left my side. And I can't blame anyone but myself.",-0.14972391304348065,1.9347231450000035,1.843304347826088,97.33491304347828,87.55,3.6782608695652175,15.195652173913045,4.3202899421422565,-1.1463369565217392,719,13,163,1,23,238,105,200,0.135,0.7140000000000001,0.152,0.5426,1,2,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,3,3,9,10,3,0,14,0,18,7,2,1,2,33,31,17,0,8,12,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,9,6,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,4,1,1,7,2,36,6,20,22,7,25,0,0,1,1,6,11,1,3,10,129,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551916953954355,0.0,0.0,0.26994058550644395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584811577816371,0.09112147462120296,0.0,0.10724072667240524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944072952112796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34576741803515565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422732258830343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25732436986977475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469900658818846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14159104210249673,0.0,0.3681902293752852,0.06366686133894743,0.0,0.11507330652986472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761721071105083,0.0,0.0,0.1321221412930893,0.1309220891382007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19159765727722888,0.2898877521179463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504377151931054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830694537596707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12440341191691295,0.2710385723046367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129098083958283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337696995815976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798302415463447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657758262295233,0.0,0.0,0.10345804771499437,0.07598955632997982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847746380665163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373003262853982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171716598353021,0.12080622282073278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257426874873373,0.0,0.0,0.08392061051168846
mentalhealth,anpxp,2020/01/17,I'm so sick of myself I hope this is the right subreddit. I've been struggling so much the past week and I can't leave my bed. I've been crying for days and my head hurts so much because of it. I've been having intrusive thoughts about hurting myself even though I know I won't act on them. I'm not sure what's causing this but it's a reoccuring period in my life ever since my grandma passed and I started high school(abt a year and a half ago). I can't stop my self from crying and I'm so sick I don't know what I'm supposed to do. I just need somebody to talk to :(,0.08805860805860632,1.95934604761905,2.1439682539682536,96.95445054945057,84.55555555555556,5.146764346764347,20.009768009768013,6.297961479604792,-0.1048429792429788,446,13,108,4,13,149,74,126,0.203,0.753,0.044000000000000004,-0.9593,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,1,0,9,5,0,1,5,0,10,4,1,1,2,17,20,11,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,6,5,0,1,3,0,0,2,5,3,0,1,4,0,16,2,10,15,2,15,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,1,9,65,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545261848343664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062652450003687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790770027180996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3829696820848196,0.11242345045538192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11513822307365232,0.15768448405083788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890495313327232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841810617068595,0.0,0.17314135930402424,0.0,0.0,0.3732312162284114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916059343403933,0.0,0.0,0.18458212630354548,0.0,0.0,0.12312898297623505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562938698422505,0.12925776314456286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664103429805064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488702761988645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642345583063718,0.0,0.0,0.18185615822179296,0.0,0.0,0.14420119292344166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338620830849087,0.0,0.0,0.1457412332418308,0.0,0.18223949839004933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16429668760178995,0.0,0.0,0.14011364692127684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17127075681173726,0.13839241978221967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398308195230842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225783411560078
mentalhealth,TrippieHippie14,2020/01/17,"On the verge of a rampage, raging. Hey everyone. This is my first time posting here, and I need answers. Cant go to my therapist at the moment because I'm unable to drive my own vehicle, so im absolutely fucked right now. 

Anywho, lately, I've been feeling myself reel and reel and reel everything up, and I am most definitely on the verge of letting go. My anger is getting worse, and the way that I react to things seem uncontrollable now. 

No one understands when you just say ""stop"". ""Stop talking to me thag way, because it makes me feel this way"". They never do. And the worse thing of all is, its the people that I love. They dont care. They think that mental health is a joke, until you SNAP. 

I dont want to snap. 

Also, I was officially diagnosed with Major Depression Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder back in 2018. 

What is this feeling called? Am I about to have a mental breakdown? Please, someone explain.",3.041413770053474,5.428677880681819,4.404465240641713,81.92449197860965,77.01136363636363,7.550267379679145,26.26203208556149,8.4952907291091,2.0789094919786097,721,28,134,15,17,238,112,176,0.20600000000000002,0.718,0.075,-0.9763,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,3,1,9,8,3,1,9,0,15,4,0,2,2,27,32,11,0,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,11,8,0,2,8,1,0,3,5,5,0,2,2,4,19,3,17,29,4,27,0,1,0,2,11,8,1,2,12,93,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265699106735836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820226667686638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870817200848657,0.0,0.15650563260943628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310795460512535,0.0,0.13088119470932946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056440656167696,0.13029227472050173,0.0,0.0,0.2942449886249838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008960443589908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266249662411492,0.11537017117974305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947223307422556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919097612749773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867547445957835,0.06706773171507367,0.0,0.14591061676352182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364507069470602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866101847906084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14480631444898898,0.0,0.0,0.1312664449363179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585842727687105,0.0,0.0856875948982578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587323960300986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518430974562896,0.09900642226326994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869864516173468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899520324943197,0.0,0.0,0.14091109139163313,0.0,0.0,0.12294243447178126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096267963865512,0.0,0.10208452735876436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686271271991157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876700599385036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21464519190364634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317848958308777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149046808509725,0.17056589761801194,0.0822539508389074,0.0,0.0,0.07485325006973215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133637109386165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571561890428022,0.30568104801610263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616388430498917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sparrowanne,2020/01/17,"I'm going on medical leave from work, what can I do with my time to rebuild my mental health? I'm taking a leave from work for a few months to focus on my mental health. I've struggled with MDD and GAD for most of my life and lately, especially due to excessive work stress, I can feel myself slipping back into a dark place.

My doctor and therapist have agreed I need some time away to focus on myself for a little while. I want to make the most of this time that I have so I can return to work feeling stronger and better.

What sort of activities or practices would be worth pursuing to help me in this venture? Is there anything you'd caution against doing? If you've been in a similar place, what was your experience?",5.246458333333333,5.665233506944442,5.891666666666668,81.32000000000002,68.09722222222223,8.622222222222224,28.5,8.515128840125781,1.9304083333333324,571,18,113,8,9,186,89,144,0.054000000000000006,0.8340000000000001,0.11199999999999999,0.7953,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,5,3,3,0,2,6,0,13,5,0,1,0,19,22,8,0,4,2,0,2,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,2,2,16,1,25,17,4,20,0,0,0,0,3,10,0,6,9,79,22,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12093839839038745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138077000315055,0.11300582260084095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997722988981875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15042331986485824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375845552765446,0.0,0.0,0.14861827355347856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835227161948668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124305529980454,0.0,0.0,0.09850650360523801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657811744370783,0.3112261503341944,0.0,0.0,0.10380463193722056,0.0,0.1472959869694709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809924498786908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805021592884318,0.2962091856422389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11730482478057674,0.0,0.0,0.10897153703315718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070910542376061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683461370212362,0.15363810857151294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049822561261437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063589426236542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25708671105010256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668285131725799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4279645717315181,0.0,0.0,0.10439861927487304,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RedditorsDoMeFavors,2020/01/17,"I'm always acting Not sure if this is the sub I'm looking for, but I suppose it is.

I have noticed something about myself back in my teens. Although sometimes I'd find it a bit inconvenient (I hated that it gave me less credibility when speaking about certain subjects, if people who knew me for a little longer were around), I always thought it was just a teenager thing...and maybe it is. I'm 20 years old, so I haven't fully developed yet. Could be my answer.

The thing is, I am never ""myself."" I'm always going through some phase where I'm fascinated by something/someone, and I want to act within that realm...I *live* for every detail that can make me a believable character. I read about the subject and I become somewhat obsessed with becoming the character I've set out to be. I focus on even the slightest details, such as how I move my eyebrows and certain word choices, tone of voice, and so on.

I feel like I have no real personal values. I have lost certain values over time upon losing interest in one of my personas that I thought were real values I had developed. I feel like I have no real personality and am always developing a new personality that I'll use for several months, or maybe a year.

And even when I'm in serious situations, I am mostly worried about playing my character in a believable way. I want to be noticed for my ""personality"" by people through my subtle ways. I don't try to give verbal hints...I'm willing to behave a certain way for months so people finally pay attention to everything and notice that I ""am"" a certain type.

This is compulsive behavior. I get the urge to do this even with people I know won't buy my new persona, such as my mom. I don't try as hard, because I don't want to be seen as an imposter, but I still get the urge to act.

I'm not asking for a diagnosis, but I'm curious if there are any mental illnesses that share these traits. Is this common? Is it just a normal thing for young, developing brains?",4.033731622560811,5.440691669250652,5.744198520894598,77.64813953488375,71.58397932816538,8.335347055154594,29.882295286465286,8.841846274778883,2.517676361044283,1544,64,288,29,29,529,190,387,0.08900000000000001,0.773,0.138,0.9513,0,0,2,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,0,2,23,16,1,1,19,0,33,2,1,3,7,53,62,25,0,8,11,1,3,2,0,2,1,2,0,4,21,11,0,0,9,2,2,5,10,5,0,1,10,7,41,11,44,45,5,39,0,2,2,0,11,13,0,7,19,201,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844356603426034,0.0,0.0,0.05811519852806985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607682212084929,0.07989283236271971,0.0,0.0,0.06571286329538999,0.0,0.05209514587980719,0.18876598342440767,0.0,0.1925665471142435,0.0,0.0,0.09329933193791122,0.0,0.0,0.09540074996516933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682322314191281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16933502183172558,0.0,0.07200307670169193,0.0,0.0768052343877707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864214964189282,0.12210416433916005,0.0,0.093616395729471,0.07810817671405239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929782805309397,0.08198026870469548,0.048568442802805575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655467311947113,0.08437328475961507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04696615107255864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350211407058665,0.08565258703415128,0.07546205487640585,0.0,0.07176421937775901,0.09560700493667716,0.09328883124147697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05704469138761741,0.0,0.1717105412716468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861227911755513,0.0,0.0,0.1000888028561294,0.136425464410333,0.0908296238161005,0.0,0.0,0.06591141705058172,0.16507408988606656,0.0,0.0,0.08373188859370471,0.0,0.29188765716645737,0.08967507314306247,0.0,0.05790937758618722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23698664481690815,0.2984787701689284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548234413478739,0.2918138972916193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965445909529902,0.0,0.0,0.09605974124710603,0.0,0.0,0.07240931779496683,0.06579068091182685,0.08452135144911664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06824784161289561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08054430127324001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032592061472251,0.0,0.0,0.13569014586451542,0.04983195706050607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604239819718695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380932540981137,0.0,0.0,0.1512181822378912,0.20350064753044636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678798381962707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100658685609416
mentalhealth,ryangreycounselling,2020/01/17,"Who am I? Identity Building  Your identity is your sense of your self image, your self esteem and your individuality. When you don’t have a strong sense of who you are, it can cause anxiety and insecurity. It can also cause you to find it difficult to assert your rights and to protect your personal boundaries...",6.270263157894735,7.808560543859649,7.356973684210532,67.6975657894737,66.3684210526316,10.612280701754386,31.793859649122812,10.686352973137794,3.6925122807017545,249,10,43,7,4,84,36,57,0.111,0.795,0.094,-0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,10,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,0,7,0,0,2,0,6,7,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,11,1,5,7,0,2,0,0,0,0,15,1,0,0,1,34,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296488347450592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21968339298848535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5900030500118262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624671368567203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507447731930588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24524063860868806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5991595033740563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KarmaPog,2020/01/17,"Went to see a Psychiatrist and I feel so stupid. I went to see a psychiatrist because to get disability I had to. I have major anxiety problems and tend to have panic attacks whenever I’m out in public or around people. I’ve prepared myself to be there and managed to not have a panic attack but my anxiety was through the roof. 

She asked me a bunch of normal questions but then towards the end she began asking me what she called “weird questions”. Now these questions were so simple and at home when I’m not around anyone I know I could have answered any of them in like 5 seconds but while there I struggled to answer most of them. 

One of the questions was 7x8 and like I know I could answer that question quick, but there in front of the psychiatrist my mind was absolutely racing and it took me like 2 mins cause I kept losing my place and I was just so anxious. She asked me to repeat sequences of numbers and that was difficult as well for some reason when I know it shouldn’t have. 

She also asked me the date which I messed up on at first before correcting myself. I messed up on the actual date and day and took me a minute to remember the month. I also said it was 2019 instead of 2020 but I think that’s an easy mistake to make lol.

Another one was explain the saying “don’t cry over spilled milk” and even that took me a good minute to come up with my words. 

Anyways coming away from it, I don’t know what those questions are for and it’s left me feeling really stupid not being able to answer simple questions that I should’ve been able to answer on the fly. 

Does anyone have any insight on what all that was for and have had any similar experiences?",4.4794007050528775,5.463147591591593,5.116581799190495,84.16659224441834,70.08108108108108,7.7132262697480085,26.790573181877534,7.893859768569023,1.4897892414153278,1320,41,263,16,23,425,164,333,0.14,0.777,0.083,-0.9591,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,2,19,19,4,3,16,1,27,1,0,3,2,67,56,29,0,6,10,0,2,3,0,1,0,2,1,0,17,19,1,1,23,0,0,8,6,14,1,4,20,6,39,5,46,31,5,43,0,1,2,0,23,20,0,10,18,194,56,1,0.155207830733462,0.0,0.07573022689855552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241196461625048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15831997080308005,0.08137447167204699,0.11873356568858418,0.08767033528810908,0.0,0.10852492401064984,0.0,0.0,0.13816787532377264,0.2901967404374565,0.17657131398926185,0.07291143305172415,0.0,0.0,0.0473066265140584,0.0,0.06603521617864226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924227422732504,0.0,0.0,0.07972059806395558,0.0,0.13369780313633509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239208234645389,0.0,0.08524425703122121,0.05004810539980449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791170930098339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873403495250656,0.0,0.0,0.05125665419976883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591152025252243,0.0,0.0,0.07847774269235626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600985076696285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040544842795629366,0.0,0.0,0.0650904823167877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784305454933023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17059632947134756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431688111194507,0.0,0.0,0.11374005936902555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681893098259356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05180121611157159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783578321308881,0.0,0.06194270486118539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603536018803056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517284291522493,0.0,0.0,0.18210294797042872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053800783671088856,0.0,0.08107957440681489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425646636826358,0.0,0.0,0.60853901990777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04971505534574967,0.07978974991085222,0.0,0.0,0.0879101081313177,0.0,0.07381909463156547,0.06171374829271248,0.0,0.0,0.1236805462689831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811284619577878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049725455458237616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586624161723829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977523977025822,0.14387921405063606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nanaso,2020/01/17,"Should I go to psychologist if I’m just unhappy? Lately I hate my life more and more but I don’t know what to to about it. I feel hopeless when I think about the future. I don’t think that I fit into any specific disorder. I can relate to some of depression and ADHD (inattentive type) symptoms tho. So would it be weird if I started seeing therapist? People usually go there if they suspect they might have a disorder so I don’t know how would it even look like. How should I start, should I just say “hi, can you please tell me what’s wrong” with me?”, really...",2.325,4.143249394736846,3.968280701754389,86.91663157894739,76.98245614035088,8.068771929824562,22.803508771929828,8.841846274778883,1.539851929824562,437,13,93,10,10,146,74,114,0.243,0.6809999999999999,0.077,-0.9661,0,0,0,0,0,2,16.0,0,1,2,0,12,6,1,0,2,0,13,2,0,2,0,25,26,12,0,8,6,0,1,1,0,6,2,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,6,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,0,4,18,1,9,19,3,10,0,2,2,0,6,2,0,5,7,67,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21747393266319506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12305627717863488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15585712742529031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4147824793939873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951972352814792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914967847213275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20568291638167505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17865657485169253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19889735734471964,0.0,0.20412623650697975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278145659257552,0.0884059553638883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519574551051813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19196570717604225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545209769066892,0.0,0.0,0.1986353349114326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592503964367948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439034648083599,0.0,0.0,0.1441984940947027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561631595579479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880825584850815,0.0,0.0,0.15816350959007686,0.0,0.0,0.21010384940902735,0.0,0.2318985810317131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992974556638481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570918841836677,0.19784696608126756,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ogcaryts,2020/01/17,"Periods of extreme sensitivity... is this a mental health issue? So what I’m referring to is kind of like PMS times 10. It’s definitely not PMS because 

1. I’m on birth control and don’t get my period anymore

2. I experienced this separate from PMS when I had periods 

3. It lasts for like a few weeks at a time then returns many months later

I’ll go from fatigued and unable to focus, to smiling and cuddly, to bawling my eyes out to irritated by anything and everything in short periods of time with little to no trigger.

I cried over a meme featuring a grimes song this morning and I don’t even like grimes and the meme wasn’t funny.

My boyfriend keeps telling me I’ve been super energetic lately, and I have been around him. I can’t keep my hands off him or my mouth shut. I keep rambling on and on and squeezing him like a stuffed bear.

I smacked him in the face the other day for NO reason. I just got upset and smacked him. He said or did nothing wrong. 

At work I get nothing done because I can’t focus. I’m either too tired and fatigued to do anything other than stare blankly at the screen, or so excited about something I just thought of that I have to go google it.

Is hypersensitivity like this normal? A symptom of a mental health issue? Something I should seek help for?

I know it’s not bipolar, I have friends with bipolar and that seems VERY different from what I’m experiencing.

Instead of shifts between mania and depression I seem to shift between normal and emotional wreck. 

I have taken a full neuro-psych-cognitive eval in the past and scored normally on all parts of the exam except one part of the cognitive exam that had to do with memory, and I was just in the lower range of normal there.",4.267544378698227,5.651963778106513,5.392859171597632,80.47906390532545,70.98224852071006,8.129893491124259,29.79218934911243,8.608573733854374,2.2877037633136097,1359,55,261,23,25,450,178,338,0.106,0.784,0.11,0.3086,2,0,2,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,3,12,14,0,1,17,0,22,15,4,3,1,48,40,23,0,5,10,0,2,5,1,1,11,3,0,0,15,21,0,4,6,1,0,2,9,5,0,1,12,10,30,9,49,27,6,39,0,3,3,0,10,19,0,5,23,174,45,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285011205145657,0.0,0.0,0.1706851029204122,0.09232178711697653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643842983092535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631693697740032,0.0,0.0,0.11391797307644012,0.0668828484407296,0.0,0.08932323858102223,0.0,0.0,0.10835241101276616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612892249698952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665713661186375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849791829353477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320573994735748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012426559742335,0.0,0.10836592330881237,0.0,0.11787888379251375,0.0,0.08294447377929434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204727439907592,0.0,0.0,0.06951304519477743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164876646554775,0.0,0.27654034719108633,0.0,0.1079955483562943,0.0569950068910175,0.08453556847620687,0.11698673538622202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533315727488003,0.10394230050282413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514326965335176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20902581814468435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277844901708686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4064458729030888,0.19902055565632373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027498100664492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22461053630491712,0.09900067738049242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662872665769467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864971468618583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18882308138981613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15967841631907542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077919471635656,0.0,0.0,0.0906450486757386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233228210081966,0.18141827706949687,0.11919667645451222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556966434704462,0.0,0.0,0.08318801345825215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550039725233608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338802431271328,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skellycloset,2020/01/17,"I don't feel anything other than anger and regret I can't feel happy. Even when something really good happens whether I've been expecting it or not. My brain processes it as good and I should be happy. So I try to act happy and force it out. It's as if I'm on autopilot and someone else is telling me what is the expected thing to do. But I just can't be happy, I feel numb. 


Even when I got my new phone after 2 months of using a barely functioning one, I still didn't feel happy and I tried so much to force it out.


Generally I feel nothing, as if I'm just walking around and doing stuff pretending that I'm alive. But I feel so dazed and numb. However, if something bad happens I usually feel it so much. I want to hurt people or myself. Sometimes the anger takes time to catch up. 

When I start to regret something it lingers longer and its hard to get rid of, same goes for being anxious over something. 


I don't know what to do. It's been like this for about 2 years now. I think I've grown used to it, but when I notice it can make me worry. Any advice?",1.8421878687750777,3.4047516233183863,3.486023129572814,90.97412320037763,77.60986547085201,6.488458815199434,22.499173943828183,7.273561745256523,0.6675345291479822,824,24,183,10,19,274,120,223,0.162,0.79,0.048,-0.96,1,0,4,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,0,16,17,2,0,3,0,17,3,1,3,0,43,39,28,0,9,12,0,8,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,18,11,0,0,9,1,0,4,6,9,0,1,4,8,22,8,25,31,3,23,0,3,0,0,2,6,0,5,14,121,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273198432025654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149211992051432,0.0,0.0,0.11876716674648202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651317133548649,0.09358813921298728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777929974314364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736003712905856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.087822766109054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887497010716668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720988054351795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054926174163628834,0.0,0.0,0.17635639561596125,0.0840821998946893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18593252232478,0.5595650984190287,0.09417598166664608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112544020163542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05777679143714134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051361290195605536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017520409127513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391389781731955,0.0,0.154565541150589,0.0,0.0,0.1015353722331712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087523243787536,0.1196913940930798,0.0,0.0,0.07123892323820206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288402199395119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06734907821049564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907645095043489,0.3237373608646491,0.10397642521561,0.0,0.07441167465089818,0.0,0.08395708868737216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12034889122033378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904480340340911,0.0,0.09188840142017883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984381280958846,0.06736316726228242,0.0,0.0,0.061302246921222776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427529675179602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18159742294958497,0.11578602836724687,0.0,0.06200849744719705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067647896598953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06770038194495477
mentalhealth,AloneAndAbused_,2020/01/17,I STABBED MYSELF IN THE ABDOMEN IT DOESNT HURT TOO BAD. I CANT REALLY FEEL ANYTHING. I JUST DONT WANT TO LIVE ANYMORE.,-0.08521739130434725,1.5422283043478302,1.5953043478260869,91.81817391304348,113.7826086956522,3.5791304347826087,21.991304347826084,5.6839178017228535,0.5741200000000002,93,4,17,1,5,30,21,23,0.16,0.621,0.21899999999999997,0.36200000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,2,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,13,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.383967225064058,0.0,0.0,0.3186067765066458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32326961667745424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4537587265558933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19576408195025455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4144720038103251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418769752226546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480301251023297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283620769265253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HerNameIsJenifer,2020/01/17,"Someone from Spain ? Need help ! Hi ! 
I have a friend in Valencia (she's portuguese) and she's clearly having psycosis. Her mother flew there and is trying to get her to come back or have her admitted but she won't go anywhere and thinks everybody is trying to attack her . 


Do you guys have any number ou a place they can call to get someone to go to their house ?

Time is off the essence. I'm back in Portugal trying to help but I don't know much about your health system.. 

It's the first time any of this is happening. She is living and working in Valencia.  
Shes 25 if this helps . Please !",0.4558928571428567,2.900499605042018,1.9862552521008432,94.06913077731095,90.76470588235294,5.3279411764705875,19.202205882352946,6.9077264865688965,0.36720546218487504,459,14,97,7,16,148,75,119,0.034,0.8029999999999999,0.16399999999999998,0.9191,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,2,2,4,2,1,0,4,0,14,1,0,0,1,14,26,8,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,3,0,0,4,2,1,0,1,1,0,15,1,14,24,1,15,0,0,0,0,22,5,0,2,5,62,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236562348059201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978751847855268,0.0,0.2674892219690579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760619549459672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14982885330190254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14794828359234125,0.0,0.0,0.13438107870969115,0.0,0.18174680992119027,0.0,0.19770155074771426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17222213629455474,0.15380937825952826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848838484986785,0.0,0.0,0.3497531463665646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006966351689337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558965002641487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15358702493558996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127861599936738,0.12896995476388254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817241476614492,0.19092744519632127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947476507486887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114499684579754,0.0,0.0,0.2028447819020144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3542695743182605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662611944246507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LouieRen18,2020/01/17,"I'm afraid to seek help (Long Post) Forgive me because this might be a long post for a first time Redditor like me. I've been looking for sites where I could write my story. A friend introduced me to Reddit to browse memes (so if he read this I might drop out) instead of other websites. I haven't really used it since I downloaded it so here's like my first interaction with this.  


Just like the title suggest, I'm afraid to seek help. Well, as much as possible I would like to be anonymous but I don't know how to keep anonymity in Reddit. I also don't tell others my problems in person just like in social media.  Currently, I had already deactivated most of my social media accounts tho, except Instagram, although I don't open it as much as I did and archived thousand of my posts...  


One of my problems is that I forget what they are. So I'm often left sad without any reason why I'm just sad. It started when I was younger at the peak of my puberty where I'm too anxious about everything I do and when I did something that is considered embarrassing for me but normal for others, I imagine there's a vault of memories on the back of my head where I store all my ""bad memories"" and forget them. Looking back, I used to ""open"" it and just remember all the embarrassing things I did, well I don't remember why. Then it came a time where I couldn't open that vault and it takes all my mem'ries, the ""good"" and the ""bad"". I think it took a toll on my emotions as I grew up.  


So I'm already 18 and recently came out to my parents. Well, I thought they fuuullyy accepted me and told me they were open-minded and was fine with it. About my sexuality, hmm. I don't know how to tell you the entirety of it because I'm really new to it too because I recently (well years ago tho, like 2-3) decided to think about it. So basically I was so straight (acting like one though) but I thought it was natural, I grew up like it and thinking I was straight so I thought I was tho. But you know, this is sooo new to me, the lingo, actions, everything! So when my parents asked me to explain, I really don't know the answer. So back to my parents, a day after I opened up to them, my mom called me and asked me a series of questions and lecturing me about what a bad decision this was. Although I was quiet the whole time, a little teary-eyed (I don't want to show her I was crying because it would show that I was weak and am not ready to make that decision) so with all my power within me I stopped my myself from crying and my voice from quivering. Then I said, ""Why are you like this to me? I opened up to my friends and classmates and they treated me the same as if nothing has happened. You're supposed to be the one who should understand me first before them."" then she answered this and it was too intense I went to my room, ""You've become gayer. How would we understand if you don't tell us."" (I forgot to mention that they said ""they already knew"" when I came out""). Then the next day after that, whilst I was having my brunch (It was a Saturday) she went to sit with me on the table and talked with me (Again, it was more of a one-sided conversation as I stayed quiet the whole time).  She said this, ""About the thing, you said to us the other day, you're dad was really disappointed because he has hopes for you. He would understand and accept you sooner, just give him time.""  


Fast forward, my mom's **changed**. We used to be extremely religious (Roman Catholic), I grew up praying the Rosary every night while kneeling down (oftentimes, seiza style). So as I grew up I have learned a lot and of course, in our generation, there is an answer to almost all questions with the use of your phone. I have kept myself but I don't think I could call myself religious, tho I love and respect all religions (I think that is when I started to take a step back to mine). So yeah like I said earlier, she has somewhat changed. Although she prays before going to work, now she does these rituals. I'm not used to sudden changes to I called her out while we're eating dinner. ""Why are you doing this? This is all just a scam or fakery (I don't know the proper term), who do you really believe in? We're Catholics, we're supposed to believe in one God. (I know this part became a little religious, I'm sorry guys, please bear with me) Technically, there is no ""God"" in your rituals so who do you do ""it"" for? Please stop this already."" So that escalated weeks later, I was taking an afternoon nap 'cause why not? It's the weekend. She called me to her room and told me, ""You, (my name), stop with your negativity! You're ruining this for me and for the energy coming in this house! I'm not doing this just for me but for us family!"" (It's too long I forgot the rest) So I was tired and still dazed because I just woke up so I said, ""I don't want to talk about this right now, I'm going back to my room."" While walking back to my room she was shouting, ""Come back here! I am not done talking with you!"" So I was lying on my bed my sister walked into my room looking for something, a charger maybe. Then my mom busted through the door with flaming eyes and shouting, (I forgot most of it because like I was, I was sleepy all my emotions are turned off that time and my sister was still at my room and now stuck in the situation). So she pulled my blanket but could only pull half of it as I was holding the other end. So when she realized that she let go and started pointing at me (I was pulling back my blanket at the time)  


""You've been too much for this family! You think you're so smart, you're not! You have not contributed anything yet you're so boastful! Demon! When you came out we accepted you and you're still like this!"" (My sister doesn't know I came out, well that saved me the trouble) She called me a lot of nasty things which I couldn't translate, but she called me a Demon several times, and for me who grew up religious that is something for me. So when that happened, I officially became the black sheep of the family **\*applause**\*  


Writing this is mentally draining because it takes effort to remember stuff accurately. Are you still here with me?  


This happened weeks ago and as of now, she speaks to me in a soft tone. Well I know she's doing that to forgive her, well I don't? Well, I'm doing all my duties as their eldest although there's really no feelings left. I don't think I could recover from this, I have already considered myself as dirt and demon as they have suggested.  


I grew up having only myself to support me. I cried extremely silently if they ever caught me, I'd get ""lovely beating"" because **men shouldn't cry**. I have only publicly cried in front of my previous adviser when I lost my phone and in front of my previous professor. It really takes effort to keep composure is not? I literally have no one to tell my feelings, problems, and rants. I don't have anyone to lash out, I'm just by myself. I have a lot of friends though, but we're not on the level to tell our problems.  


So in my class, I joined this clique (one of their ""leader"" or member was kicked out and I think they were looking for replacements so I was that one but I drag along a friend so it's not hard for me to adjust) They used to gossip and make fun about me when the classes just started because of my hair. At that time I was growing my hair because I shaved my head the previous year (at the time it was my way to vent? It's crazy I know that is why I grew it out) So when I grew it out, it was ugly, I know! It's all spiky mohawk like spiky. They called me names like McSundae and Spiky (like the name of a dog). I'm extremely receptive, even though I was erasing the writings on the board, I could hear them clearly and see their reflection through the glass board. I may be ambivert but I'm not a dumb one. I never confronted them about this until I joined their clique and admitted that I knew from the start. Then after I joined their clique, a few weeks (maybe months) have passed and I started to smell bad! Like bad-bad! I couldn't stop or control it, I used products to stop it but all failed. It's because my anxiety came back (well I was not diagnosed but it is what it is) then I heard whispers again and they started picking on me again jokingly this time, but I knooow. It's gone now though, I'm really glad. Until now they didn't know that I knew.  


In the clique, this was this girl that I got close to and I thought I could trust her. But now the others are teasing her with a boy who used to blatantly bully me the previous years. Of course, I don't want to ruin our friendship and their growing romance so I don't tell her that he used to hurt me. Then my only escape, my friend, was gone. I couldn't trust her anymore, well maybe I do, but I don't know. I don't want to interact with anyone who's affiliated with that boy.  


So last year, my friend wants me to introduce myself to the school guidance counselor which helped him and two others from our class. So one day I said yes, but when we came to her office I chickened out. Luckily there was a research convention in our school at the time and she wanted to come and I used that to get out of there but I went with her and got to know her a little. She was really kind and extremely intelligent! She gave me her one and only chocolate. I'm embarrassed to talk with her again, I really want to but I can't it's too embarrassing to tell her this story of mine.  


I am not suicidal (yet I think) but there's always a thought in my head that I want to do it but I don't (confusing? a'ight) If only if I decided to do it, I want to do it quickly with no pain. Again, it's just a thought. I'm afraid to seek professional help because I'm afraid of the truth (that I might be depressed). I don't want to open up to my friends because I know they have problems too, I really do, they had told me and I listened. I feel like they'd laugh at me or something like that and think ""Just because of that you're like that?"". This is my form of venting out. It feels so great doing this. If you finished this, daaamn!   


Thank you.",2.052141029883757,3.9558748637029817,3.4131861733142124,90.19351223400629,78.08646800195406,6.610259966066263,23.413778884388904,7.581843572515786,0.9589093790545832,7814,254,1680,113,186,2552,554,2047,0.095,0.775,0.13,0.9976,5,0,4,0,0,0,312.0,12,22,27,11,138,97,3,9,77,2,150,15,6,19,16,331,309,167,1,40,59,10,8,19,7,10,4,17,8,6,126,104,3,14,65,6,2,42,49,35,10,16,90,33,336,62,226,191,29,255,8,9,7,2,196,87,1,27,140,1205,462,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0448345195880653,0.0,0.02532337895376157,0.0,0.1395357441861304,0.02022368278099201,0.021042555660498504,0.0,0.0,0.017197454050239043,0.0,0.01934609098706397,0.028569482833500637,0.025079990139081628,0.03536545107692488,0.0,0.020810773137468083,0.0,0.047283786283125184,0.0,0.0,0.1750118003705421,0.12669204456993916,0.2312399940634529,0.027929822218721874,0.04303832006168013,0.056984307538945324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18076097804915328,0.2024679396096899,0.0,0.025978870166058286,0.08025753838839149,0.06535295683017102,0.0,0.0,0.028363874129197563,0.12114772324237688,0.0,0.13889443503920915,0.06523750517755254,0.0,0.02178146331704601,0.02566790245227764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022130660350414846,0.0258795277574825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025877061000400943,0.0,0.05689366355605456,0.02239863489970261,0.0,0.0,0.016703210925914994,0.02287543724867453,0.021307156035182358,0.0,0.04545642181927844,0.0,0.07152093364078227,0.0,0.05114771182961928,0.01806653688493632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453268230803044,0.0,0.0,0.13676806234838254,0.0,0.026425020194802983,0.0242596074655804,0.043117132069478266,0.021211295828430184,0.04045200424157547,0.02788132016401062,0.0,0.025040183272262827,0.06708919834830475,0.0,0.022654064799714636,0.0,0.07786173231015779,0.0,0.028502651749902318,0.0,0.06780299810078284,0.0,0.0,0.02511778076169169,0.0,0.02918022406922997,0.027072502781335432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04495622508180134,0.0,0.02633470429750704,0.1945751788898231,0.02061399041280774,0.0,0.0,0.05495335861522028,0.025859816409763783,0.0,0.2347445446093541,0.0760389605703119,0.0,0.06714016860580033,0.0849458934295255,0.0,0.02760603816746677,0.0644996611067445,0.045648797152347036,0.0,0.03376133898862203,0.0,0.07621889501163412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02548546303605077,0.08048321070828253,0.02553478018051295,0.08885485888327505,0.02018551699815681,0.0,0.05577119117413767,0.0,0.019504511639343924,0.04884873746631843,0.026895242950165724,0.02373210563247648,0.0247779469588228,0.024265571878219733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885020225129086,0.11540099300636165,0.02690938361475904,0.0,0.0842416527273355,0.027385629063985933,0.0,0.0,0.02208146519740749,0.0,0.055519671539133765,0.023906372060938014,0.028509658586531563,0.07265989688268137,0.0,0.0,0.12099125857182982,0.0,0.0,0.05665915557619114,0.0,0.025295941898136574,0.0,0.17820928335214542,0.026001404955007437,0.04993986736113138,0.0,0.08594285570695814,0.0215967517785836,0.16839006545957402,0.0,0.0,0.051187835218421414,0.02015213716166174,0.0,0.0,0.028569482833500637,0.0,0.02091940345151969,0.028426006070977193,0.0,0.0515581019895189,0.0,0.07787513356724372,0.0,0.02830907510793,0.12529827761759665,0.02695481397577511,0.08078362630724685,0.1057140927858534,0.0,0.0,0.028949967200021694,0.02766216896327694,0.028697769071657383,0.0,0.0,0.0950712733061817,0.08130567714696027,0.15472650608923974,0.02328280402539737,0.0,0.0,0.050402859622368026,0.16204233067360066,0.09938564275523147,0.1204603154258246,0.1769553191220942,0.029066098329526637,0.0,0.07249445152418993,0.028097118727878283,0.0,0.027507277012783108,0.02470377439816939,0.07898052962280565,0.09125901450346748,0.218416612928076,0.0,0.0,0.14916165400580622,0.020073309127034287,0.06085616774570756,0.0,0.2273793647838551,0.070329742479177,0.1369168665374228,0.05646875027242075,0.0,0.02437778832627939,0.0,0.018410764760644883,0.0,0.0,0.07185859943609015,0.0,0.0,0.06514140070130497
mentalhealth,Nitrog3nn,2020/01/17,"6 year anniversary of my attempt 6 years ago today I was in a terrible place and decided taking my life would be the only option. Luckily it was a failure and after some serious life changes I am feeling so much better today 

I’m so glad I am alive. 

The road to being able to say that has been a tough one with many relapsed but today I am just thankful I am here.",1.7230451127819535,3.6008595000000017,4.1706015037594,84.49921052631579,79.0,6.974436090225563,25.330827067669173,7.957251820313856,1.6380774436090229,286,11,57,5,7,100,56,76,0.086,0.7190000000000001,0.195,0.852,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,4,6,0,0,5,0,11,2,0,0,0,10,15,5,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,3,2,7,3,6,9,2,10,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,7,41,9,0,0.21353646134866452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892871889327728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888556472064245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22589326218254197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797045091065673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016542353479419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164924559346543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697386891141413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469783257691146,0.16240410117713178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22310015319032886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16981276479044138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16055284399368802,0.0,0.0,0.1965956840814804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6072227915864049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15169017548171065,0.0,0.0,0.2750209600812956
mentalhealth,mxnishx24,2020/01/17,"I can't stop crying help :""( Me and my boyfriend had a really bad fight and I've been apologising and he just left my messages on seen.. I don't want to lose him. I don't know what is happening and I am just losing it I can't handle these emotions please help. :(",-0.4403571428571418,1.710248535714289,1.8585714285714303,95.98642857142859,90.42857142857143,5.342857142857143,16.92857142857143,6.868970318607317,-0.14561428571428525,202,5,48,3,7,68,40,56,0.284,0.555,0.162,-0.8276,0,0,0,0,1,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,2,4,1,0,1,0,8,0,0,0,0,9,12,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,1,9,0,2,9,0,3,0,2,1,0,6,2,0,0,1,29,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21631304844084576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845767822924144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29141944569339084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290951900166548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472989940859139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237837305002193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814808593027118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5796672498898015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28438161464277306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659671979615124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21659454073496467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15280649482610273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mooselunch,2020/01/17,"Is it normal to feel sad for no reason? Usually it’s when I’m doing something, just out of the blue I feel immense hopelessness and emptiness. I dont think it’s depression since depression is like constant sadness.",5.39211382113821,6.987787073170736,6.144878048780488,75.34869918699188,68.51219512195122,9.369105691056909,35.61788617886179,9.725611199111238,3.8320178861788623,174,9,29,4,3,57,33,41,0.3,0.5329999999999999,0.168,-0.772,0,0,1,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,8,8,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,3,2,1,4,8,0,4,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3160963018200505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5038719398153192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34281618802282804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958007963190462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14290421283999852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865948907347408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007460555313152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419649277798392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251862859415645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187426763528796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32215528812994754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wotchugotmate,2020/01/17,Wanna talk? So my mom just broke the tv while fighting my dad and i want to distract myself from that shitshow rn. How was your day?,-0.7622222222222241,1.1506127777777806,0.5011851851851858,101.08733333333336,106.40740740740742,2.16,16.511111111111113,3.1291,-1.195453333333333,103,3,22,0,5,32,26,27,0.252,0.706,0.042,-0.7622,0,0,0,0,2,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,3,3,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,2,4,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,0,3,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3866894505331909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7022389235612164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4819320962016989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3536569209453698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Even_Appeal,2020/01/17,"Emotional outbursts where I become hysterical and not myself... is it more than depression? Hi there. I've always struggled with depression and anxiety but about two months ago I went off my anti-depressants for a bit (long story as to why this happened, I am back on them now) and I had multiple breakdowns where I seemed almost disconnected to reality. Just extremely emotional, hysterical, with no filter or regard for consequences when speaking to an ex. I seem to feel things so much more deeply than everyone else, and it seems to take me so much longer to fully process negative events. When something really bad happens, I usually get to a point where I struggle to function. I've had breakdowns like this in the past throughout my life. Is this just severe depression and anxiety? Or could something else be going on?",7.163061224489795,8.705783843537418,7.160687074829934,69.9063367346939,64.3061224489796,11.050068027210882,35.78843537414966,11.00357731598739,4.483316190476192,663,31,105,19,10,212,99,147,0.23399999999999999,0.7240000000000001,0.042,-0.9837,0,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,13,7,0,2,4,0,7,1,0,0,0,19,17,13,0,1,6,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,7,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,6,0,1,3,2,13,1,20,12,5,20,0,3,0,0,4,8,0,6,11,78,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383946100694176,0.0,0.12859733247763558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10685843036165298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19648686688681452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987495508524813,0.10722804809197747,0.0,0.14183338805063828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402049258193204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253551387668954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4424430223385366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145622900949991,0.28891773809284266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271391721279094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493465302985191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670958467652387,0.0,0.07298589152662815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271285087035735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070913820445374,0.06274111221296885,0.0,0.0,0.11365053350594435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250621156776367,0.0,0.1888117281449656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12259452190052407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140147971042566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227122132937112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3507351060508437,0.0,0.14508171636029046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19773298147480334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26851172560994674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655830025488096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531869974798473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545085296612835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14144006450805596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190496377961675,0.11588200663675408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,how-to-lose-at-life,2020/01/17,"my girlfriend is so much more valid and it triggers me shes skinnier,
she eats less,
she cuts deeper,
she has bigger scars,
she has it worse.
she actually needs help and im just an attention whore.
whenever i see her scars i wanna go home and try to find the sharpest blade i can and cut just as deep to prove to myself that im not faking it.
whenever i see her i immediatly notice how skinny she is and it makes me wanna not eat ever again.
shes just actually worth worrying abt and im a poser whos pretending to be depressed.",0.2681168831168819,2.6166164090909128,2.9215584415584424,88.1109090909091,89.45454545454545,6.051948051948052,19.67532467532468,7.447530270364453,0.7628051948051948,415,13,88,8,14,144,69,110,0.151,0.7759999999999999,0.073,-0.8686,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,2,0,3,0,8,4,1,3,2,21,14,9,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,5,6,3,0,3,1,1,1,2,5,0,0,0,2,19,0,7,13,3,5,0,1,2,1,13,2,0,0,2,58,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.3529660054786041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15576539045490606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701083303616649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163588706736611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652931465856554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278092606144323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121959300269385,0.0,0.18140677206299405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5860454107050453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071843092671415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294517518444549,0.13409759644879826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058983294377624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28822723871178124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227849243337143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18366142361623228,0.1843010685500401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bosharpe1,2020/01/17,"I'd like a space to vent. Hi everyone, 

First time posting here. I'm feeling absolutely shocking today. I had my last feeling of crisis just before Christmas, and it's back again today and I'm balling my eyes out. It is in response to something in the real world (That I'd like to keep private) between me and someone else, but another of the main components is my broken-self, my abandonment issues from childhood - all rearing their heads. 

I feeling in the mist of it now, and I suppose I've just got to wait it out, but it's so painful.",4.832763684913218,5.508224158878505,5.7004005340453965,81.41906542056077,69.09345794392523,7.983444592790388,34.91188251001335,7.957251820313856,2.6550704939919902,423,21,81,5,7,139,70,107,0.132,0.7959999999999999,0.07200000000000001,-0.8887,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,1,7,5,0,0,4,0,3,3,2,0,1,18,11,7,0,0,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,3,3,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,4,9,2,14,9,2,17,0,1,1,0,2,7,0,0,11,52,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22396891183003745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423838646896186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817503107067454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17842797267468535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040954676383536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32399426268206016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18168049687526694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708283299413223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192061093347452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229336357259778,0.0,0.18984960066075596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741052697718805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20869966387026168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22727601011843646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045612501513593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24311345469229798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22282211981390504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18097506216561307,0.16443287867522902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12454669925762113,0.0,0.4049188128880333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dutahrjfk,2020/01/17,"Why I started hating myself and how can I get rid of these negative thoughts I feel like I am making this post because I have no one else to talk to, and there are no therapists around me that I can reach out for. 

For the past maybe 1-2 years, I realized that I tend to self-criticize a lot of my actions that I have done throughout the day. Things such as ""why did I say that"", ""will they talk shit about me on my back because of the action that I did right now"", ""were my actions really necessary for this situation"", and many more questions pop up in my head more often than not. I tend to have these thoughts several times throughout my day and I tend to reflect on my actions and how they can effect the people around me and how I am viewed in other's eyes. Because of this, I think I am starting to hate every single thing about myself and how my actions are unrealistic and tend to be a burden to others. I don't know why I am criticizing myself so harshly, but because of this, I can't focus on my tasks because of the depressing thoughts and criticisms that I give myself throughout the day. Any action that tends to effect my surroundings, a few minutes later, I look back and think, ""was that really necessary?"" ""why in the world would I do that?"" ""what will they think of me after they leave?"" ""how clueless was I to do such a thing?"" so many questions pop up in my head and in return I started hating who I am and the situation that I am in. Are there any other people that think like this? How did you move on to daily life without thinking of these negative thoughts about yourself? It's been a while since I actually loved myself and my surroundings, and I believe that is effecting my mental stability right now. Since I don't love myself, how can I possibly think that someone else will love me for who I am?",7.796837829054277,6.004288453038676,7.937357816054598,76.08279655508616,63.64088397790054,10.948586285342868,35.10627234319142,9.627879704456738,3.069299122521936,1428,50,286,22,17,467,150,362,0.125,0.843,0.032,-0.9851,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,4,3,23,11,4,0,13,0,36,8,4,11,0,50,66,26,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,4,1,1,0,0,31,17,0,0,19,0,0,7,9,6,0,1,12,5,59,5,45,49,5,45,0,1,3,3,16,20,1,4,19,229,90,0,0.0,0.0,0.08179523366340885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11399956165252165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14923332610667628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890324390767147,0.0,0.2554763618184026,0.0,0.0,0.09443528765267953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621689242158869,0.0,0.07219316484404882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577591809545387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400400051177006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062110592000409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04238139487880363,0.05988029621841689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379195766516235,0.0804068034971713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482616696164358,0.1720449109682913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04606471947430185,0.0,0.0,0.08875219754976532,0.0,0.0,0.05920382455253252,0.08189943975247653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703868330368727,0.0,0.0,0.07125989958964175,0.22694970648548296,0.0,0.05594982016322937,0.1699585800718922,0.08420743166966126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844698176292248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08908631100259959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05679791025068157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001470093719695,0.1162190541841665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449330616709717,0.08027541334650798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877928814468336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739317007572467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316190226091202,0.0,0.06665621732005532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744147661187672,0.09469158952667893,0.08603897868676573,0.13867185320215142,0.1884320912942504,0.0,0.0,0.07101954993922405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779825168451535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13474104259179692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973202963850716,0.16705681800916544,0.3222469083850233,0.0,0.2661716305012721,0.04887552142182837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025343697678717,0.0,0.0,0.08079850584671808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059542598665676835,0.0,0.0,0.05397667514974993
mentalhealth,chuchutoro,2020/01/17,"Electroconvulsive Therapy Has anyone here been through this or is going through it? Is it helpful? Is it worth it?

Medication is failing and now me and my family are looking into all those brainy procedures. My mother is terrified of losing me after multiple attempts and is willing to try anything, and I’m starting to feel the same. I’m so tired of crying when I wake up then crying some more then crying myself to sleep.

I met a guy during one of my hospital stays who could barely string a sentence together after skipping follow-up appointments. I’m terrified of losing my memories. I’m afraid it would cause me to lose my friends. I think they’re already getting tired of my mental health struggles, and if I couldn’t remember inside jokes or what happened when we last hung out, I’m afraid I’d lose them. But mainly I’m afraid of losing myself.

So yeah, what are some perspectives and experiences?",4.8113109243697485,6.942193694117647,5.596302521008408,76.56764705882357,70.88235294117648,8.38655462184874,29.789915966386555,9.04235418022936,2.8047563025210085,728,30,122,15,14,237,104,170,0.23600000000000002,0.695,0.069,-0.9875,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,1,7,6,12,0,4,3,1,14,6,2,1,1,24,28,16,0,4,4,1,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,10,9,0,0,3,1,1,1,1,10,0,1,2,2,17,2,17,22,6,14,0,6,1,0,8,3,0,5,9,86,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217692686270335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375088167777604,0.0,0.09856628690345444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304400001387122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563220908012526,0.0,0.3947083169741435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716491503878335,0.11291512042462487,0.0,0.060562863346686126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253943332695788,0.0,0.06257855257816278,0.0,0.06807204425549418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859808726112607,0.10591842870421897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12731737783067068,0.0,0.0,0.08028401587449657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763426278458144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058253539810033,0.6699992727385518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066275272023623,0.12070707055837825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116401281095525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568402155552728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198635277418132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477879563754284,0.12766637309510034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521695417100448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697546813784664,0.0,0.0,0.07674828200842977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27533214342277906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132073842334805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508616284593973,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaaygf7yhk,2020/01/17,"Did my therapist ""cure"" my nihilism? Perhaps it's too early to say.

I've always had a slight droning of nihilism in the background. Some air of meaninglesness. This wasn't depression either. It was a philosophical thing. I had a lack of faith in people. I saw the worst in them. I also struggled to come to terms with death, which caused some dissociation.

So first few sessions with him we dealt with my personal stuff. Big improvement. Then we had a session where I'd talk about this nihilism and phislohpical issues. He's been a therapist for decades and is well versed on philosophy.

So in that hour, I said my fears and he just gave some insights. And they.....clicked. idk, something just 'clicked' in my brain.

Immediately after I felt a sense of...peace. No more droning nihilism in the background. Everything felt a bit quieter and more at ease. And I thought to myself.....it couldn't have been that easy, could it?? A few days have passed and I feel much more at ease with existence and life. Idk how to explain it. It's like he removed a tumour.",2.3200000000000003,5.112238196969699,2.8840656565656566,89.07943181818182,83.6969696969697,5.724242424242425,25.421717171717173,7.1686216300943375,1.2783898989898996,825,34,159,12,24,256,117,198,0.10300000000000001,0.784,0.113,0.4394,0,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,2,0,1,1,10,7,0,2,12,0,13,2,1,2,0,32,22,13,1,3,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,12,15,0,0,6,0,0,3,3,4,1,1,14,7,16,3,24,6,14,22,1,1,2,0,13,12,0,3,8,109,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14331792095965964,0.1491209767083102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956560227090521,0.0,0.0,0.20006286126536715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18410285116713893,0.0,0.15437758465155718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14308834525111505,0.0,0.0,0.11557864746857005,0.0,0.15435734786110022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610666054238005,0.0,0.0,0.20166634824740634,0.0906163308711824,0.0,0.3441484095066721,0.0,0.0,0.15243992175730828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649036727866835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18705357246172705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265846338902558,0.08755524389885748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317434161238866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242448991780989,0.15648335261715818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17047420769905994,0.14251871276460634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796822218507068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18735410320493529,0.20515794061292775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14404597739576588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4161641306488367,0.1190622751508076,0.0,0.0,0.14227644351371005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113552700984213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlueMonday700,2020/01/17,Today’s diary entry turned weird art piece [diary entry ](https://imgur.com/gallery/FKx39Qy),17.896363636363628,23.73746409090909,9.081818181818182,49.54272727272729,44.45454545454546,8.036363636363637,20.090909090909093,8.841846274778883,2.4160181818181816,79,1,5,1,1,19,9,11,0.159,0.841,0.0,-0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6569857755598633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7539029716826993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,taostudent2019,2020/01/17,"Kung Fu, Smiling, and Mental Health Hi,

I was super depressed.  Like critically and considering bad things.  

I'm in a very serious Kung Fu school.  I was practicing in front of a teacher's aid.  And he was correcting my form.  The Kung Fu needs to be practiced daily and we don't always get to practice in front of someone who is taught how to coach someone.

And he told me I have to smile.  Otherwise I am just teaching myself to be angry.  I thought it was ridiculous.  But I did it because I have insane amount of respect for the Master of the school.  

So whenever I'm in pain in my work out, I just smile.  That turned into giggling and laughter.  

And then that slowly spread to other parts of my life.   I started jogging, and on the uphills I would just smile.  I think my legs are going to fall off, but I'm smiling. 

I learned that joy, happiness, and optimism are wonderful feelings.  But they also can be a discipline.  They can be learned, practiced, and repeated on demand.

Even if you don't believe this, I bet if someone showed up and gave you a birthday cake, and said Happy Birthday.  Even if it wasn't your birthday, you would smile, and most likely laugh.  So everyone is capable of learning this.  

I have recovered from depression, addressed anger issues, I'm super productive and work 16 hours a day, happily.  I even had a huge blow out with my family and somehow it didn't turn into a complete nightmare that takes years to heal.  We just accepted each other's feelings and moved on and started to rebuild a more functional relationship.  Like in a few weeks!

So maybe this could help one of you.  I know you care about yourself and others because you are on this sub.  

So maybe you can work out, or jog.  And practice smiling while doing it.  You can train your brain the way I did.  Hopefully someone finds this helpful.

Keep the effort up.  I believe in all of you.",3.030525970834013,5.342300852367694,3.9764091430444033,85.36013395051614,76.68802228412257,6.786203506472226,28.386121579551038,7.827709963407826,1.9465634278223825,1462,64,274,23,34,470,185,359,0.08199999999999999,0.6809999999999999,0.237,0.9969,1,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,2,11,2,7,15,21,2,0,15,0,32,6,2,1,2,63,57,34,0,8,11,0,2,3,0,2,4,1,1,0,19,28,0,2,11,4,1,7,4,7,0,1,14,3,40,14,40,36,8,37,0,2,0,0,25,20,0,9,12,196,59,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643855819824564,0.08993852365056744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024961630715944,0.13177983391104398,0.0,0.0,0.24355808172690496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206628254233576,0.0,0.0,0.11020371480121748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332902920235205,0.0,0.0,0.08630009544975571,0.0,0.0,0.06970832104450192,0.0,0.1861934154092859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21417485905301387,0.0,0.0,0.1032834611938768,0.0,0.0,0.10189648199176604,0.0,0.10930586959777212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879118659366344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05647192627410892,0.0,0.0614293444982234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301250321156261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148933185261216,0.0,0.0,0.14489926144555984,0.0,0.0,0.10735654715771624,0.10644567533003063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281660382147053,0.0,0.09607427391412293,0.0,0.0,0.059402766642235226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634630177621911,0.15842015418525138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21717941496660634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892806734099963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114881267136713,0.0,0.08014646067415764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324375458902094,0.0,0.11501408259080555,0.0,0.0,0.1170496154077235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604689846710473,0.0,0.0,0.1028171817231614,0.0,0.0,0.21878323159461124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3663330896374887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301158942182824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126931063595931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718093824619144,0.06925892569712437,0.0,0.08581041757060415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032834611938768,0.0,0.0,0.2351391080144392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918456335274151,0.0,0.08579584232993089,0.08670229938458837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721767099355627,0.23606975719569975,0.0,0.0,0.15356633598008354,0.0,0.0,0.06960563039644839
mentalhealth,nathr33s,2020/01/17,"Whats wrong with me? I have no interests, no motivation and no dedication. Nothing excites me anymore. Im usually gaming most of the time and i dont even that entertaining. I know this isn't normal human behaviour and u dont know why im like this.",0.4063865546218501,2.850562411764706,3.9102521008403386,80.00470588235294,91.54901960784315,7.620168067226891,24.932773109243694,8.418075326091056,2.4078773109243703,197,9,39,6,7,72,37,51,0.27399999999999997,0.597,0.129,-0.7757,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,9,6,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,0,5,4,2,6,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,24,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23075227274880375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5453895572201876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15368043854815774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5026604562589067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255745513798879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367384051379208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279732784219921,0.223259093380716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13567536588589044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562599668391888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099540839526545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543949033284953,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon35099,2020/01/17,"Not afraid of death anymore I have come to the conclusion that i'm not afraid of death anymore, more precisely the concept being dead means nothing to me. The only thing i am araid of is the process of dying.

I don't know what this says about my mental health…",5.986089743589744,5.898567480769231,5.693076923076927,85.11858974358975,66.5,8.471794871794872,30.794871794871803,7.793537801064563,1.8721717948717944,207,7,42,2,3,64,38,52,0.079,0.8059999999999999,0.115,0.2481,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,4,0,5,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,7,8,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5735278297214621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24908130139361154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000970846111228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3073580860818441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891194455291846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31497440237131397,0.0,0.0,0.29140008077068497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774518789498836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21991529468846832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22994754405877016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921016351459563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sydonixO4,2020/01/17,Just got diagnosed Just got diagnosed with Munchausen's Syndrome with traits of narcissism. I was trying to fool the doctor into thinking I had BPD but he saw right through me. When he gave me the diagnosis I had an epiphany and felt an urge to change but I really don't see that happening. Being sick just makes me feel good and I don't see anything that can replace that. I noticed there's no sub dedicated to Munchausen's so I created one r/munchausens.,2.9895006242197217,5.519416764044949,4.044194756554308,83.68092384519352,77.9887640449438,7.551061173533085,28.990012484394512,8.515128840125781,2.4599952559300875,368,17,69,8,9,119,60,89,0.102,0.774,0.125,0.4721,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,4,0,7,4,0,1,0,14,18,6,0,0,5,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,8,5,10,1,8,9,0,3,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,1,44,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18164167747746127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27800124101502044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335026800266971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44807185470350025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22592612863767925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116075327247088,0.0,0.2119350590942284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851375405563375,0.3530752970698668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951904821620805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733874150829895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513021458706496,0.0,0.0,0.14957210929762016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140505259338698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18850189732083844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3517858730783772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143463374225848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498609291774498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vamproy,2020/01/17,"Starting Over. Hello all,

New here.

I have a depression and I am autistic (aspergers), and I have recently decided to share my journey with other people. About how I deal with things (or not) and how I am going to deal with things, how I am (going to be) fighting my depression, and maybe in the process of this all, hopefully be able to not just help myself by talking about these things, but also help other people with simillar issues, or even just give them the courage to talk to someone or get help.

My first video of the year I am just explaining some things about me, where I have been and where I want to go.

But I will be creating more video's (not just about these two subjects) about depression and autism.

Hope you guys and girls appreciate what I am trying to do here, and maybe take the time to watch my video and give me some things to talk about, like, what you want ""regular""/healthy people to know and be made aware of, or just say hi to me and to support me on this.  


You can check out my 1st video on this here: [Starting Over](https://youtu.be/3SJ_ETaxo9c)  


Greetings to all, and since it is still January,

May you have a happy and healthy 2020,

Roy",7.166330343796709,6.706534358744392,6.261984304932735,83.26619020926756,64.15695067264573,9.765171898355756,30.690956651718984,9.075114841892004,2.2030750373692087,914,27,186,13,12,276,110,223,0.076,0.763,0.161,0.9684,0,0,0,0,2,0,43.0,0,4,1,1,22,11,1,0,6,0,19,0,0,4,3,49,36,23,0,4,14,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,2,15,18,0,0,3,4,1,4,3,4,0,2,2,2,26,7,33,28,6,19,0,3,1,0,23,7,0,9,9,145,41,0,0.11916037780414405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529251107851527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24569823440288294,0.3078979763858917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870430571134861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135775648709773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06225637923944274,0.2286189848020209,0.20316476627423752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798750839401335,0.0,0.12684843795073308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239612068347467,0.0,0.0,0.2367062841542273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12437247558944295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548742732805725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05821574157193104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275243065568155,0.0,0.0,0.2394252314952523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508583541855527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478324068357903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11765649746650055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476111517721277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857069588895558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096420142340952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16868465744974367,0.0,0.09516163164012448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352217846177788,0.0,0.0,0.08959377441672357,0.2873297938922497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3958243008923881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948337455997068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090207463638517,0.0,0.1164023744345552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14056775633563146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673537647941955
mentalhealth,quantumwoooo,2020/01/17,"Scared i have PTSD but im not sure :( help??? So my dad was a very angry man when I was younger. If we (my sister or I) did something wrong he could be very physical, or very loud. Screaming at the top of his voice at us, I remember nights where I was absolutely terrified.

I wasn't the easiest child, I had ADHD, (now just ADD), so I must have been difficult to deal with.

He constantly said he got angry at anything we did wrong because he loved us, and he did it because he cared. 

For example when my sister could do maths (age 7-10) he would occasionally grab her head and knuckle her because he got so annoyed at her. I'm not sure it has anything to do with that, but she seriously struggles with maths now. 

The most he did with me physically was slap me.. Is that normal? 
Verbally was maybe a bit more scary because he was so loud and angry, and could lead to slapping I guess. 

Now I'm older, I can't really bring it up without him getting upset. We've fallen out massively because I've tried to bring what happened when I was younger up, but whenever I suggest the idea it was abuse, he says I'm over exaggerating, and he did it out of love.. I then start bursting into tears and he calls me whiney and says he can't figure out why I'm being so stupid. I can't even get out the words which really doesn't help, I've no idea what to say when he finally ""humors"" me.

I don't even know why I'm trying to talk to him about it. I don't think him saying sorry with affect anything about how I feel

The reason I think I have PTSD is because I can't be friends with guys. Especially dominant, angry guys. My housemate (now at uni) is the most dictating, asshole fuck I've ever met. I've never wanted to hurt someone so badly. I think its because he reminds me of how angry my dad got and it terrifies me. I don't think I'm reacting normally to him. 


I've tried going to therapy about it but I honestly think they're useless.. Talking this problem through with anyone doesn't seem to help. 

He only ever tells us how much he loves us, and everything he does is so my sister and I can have a good life, he works extremely hard, and constantly tells us how much he loves us
...Deep down part of me is looking forward to his death and I'm not sure I even feel bad. I feel like I'm being held hostage to say I love him, otherwise he gets upset, but I don't think I care about him.",3.4295014347202297,4.156184152439028,4.9714155906264965,85.19369440459111,72.3130081300813,8.227259684361549,27.27546628407461,8.4952907291091,1.7266164992826398,1841,63,400,30,34,622,213,492,0.248,0.657,0.095,-0.9983,0,0,1,0,1,0,67.0,8,0,0,3,30,32,3,4,10,0,48,8,1,8,7,83,92,36,1,10,13,5,5,1,1,2,1,10,0,4,15,27,0,1,16,0,0,6,17,17,0,0,22,16,62,15,45,61,7,42,0,2,1,6,74,18,1,7,21,238,77,4,0.0,0.07364398037608637,0.0,0.0,0.07469870720738263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043460497974693715,0.0,0.15344578444518214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379431863157627,0.2652254669022294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785759417966984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346760856941625,0.0,0.1267431370514704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433580364523148,0.0,0.1488780779060797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407948390393997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054392605780470116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231591583046872,0.11244622804937783,0.0,0.0,0.05586126200161996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428290713214367,0.04440382722616061,0.0,0.06808819803984592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04802110466322141,0.05746166191974119,0.0974208869124371,0.0,0.0353243438425104,0.05213299710991706,0.14913404423338913,0.0,0.06847117600808296,0.12308722793022152,0.05496381129327218,0.0,0.055679026132313514,0.0,0.06378936799102364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498435500911452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653863680340905,0.14033175270465906,0.06713849345514628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034158980064119215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04390219425384268,0.03036598682998685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05219487829127743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28048835739030664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06244344940077885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09138273530656277,0.0,0.04793807305074555,0.0,0.0,0.058328628498587484,0.12179818221785535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04727197938577066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730823672415401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05947431957453634,0.14531266322220793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963667634372025,0.06390609891717806,0.0,0.0,0.07040994704628975,0.0,0.059124014911340436,0.2471423276392237,0.06222839435870105,0.0,0.0,0.05658393800332025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052664065215680775,0.047850260375817716,0.0,0.06957787693517659,0.043993909106274175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497831514280439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17574217507543755,0.0,0.0,0.09991630558565526,0.1086531111943302,0.0,0.0710801120696415,0.0,0.0,0.2389600076776521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659830141775166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44859172941111664,0.0,0.0,0.15385413308817766,0.03666086287275478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217115423200158,0.0,0.0,0.059915583594694025,0.0,0.0452498684578997,0.0,0.0,0.04415340989803199,0.1359143361247058,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,woahwoahvicky,2020/01/17,"How do I approach a friend that I think is struggling mentally. I don't know if its depression but you know that gut feeling when they think no one is looking and they just have that dead look in their eyes.

Also its not being an introvert, I for one am very introverted but I'll always seek out people when I feel like I'm sad (pretty emotional which is why I vame to this sub)

My friend, has been sharing a lot of posts on their social media accounts about ending their lives, what its worth, and idk how to approach it at all bc I love them so much and I'm afraid  that if i make a misstep it might further make them think that their unworthy/etc. Recently, my friends have been very sad about academics,  I don't know how to approach it because I was the only one from my group of friends that 'passed' and I don't want to make it seem like I'm shoving it in their faces so I just stay mum.

Btw I'm talking about multiple people, I know its a hard thing to help in but I just want them to know that I love them wholeheartedly without making them have doubts at the back of their heads that I don't. I can't claim to know how they feel but i wanna let them know that I'm there for them.",3.541842664776756,4.2109117550200805,4.149662178124263,91.39956059532247,72.01204819277109,7.304606661941887,25.0888258918025,7.285733465282438,0.8304540987479325,933,26,213,9,17,296,124,249,0.11199999999999999,0.715,0.172,0.9642,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,16,0,17,15,0,3,7,0,20,6,4,8,1,45,49,19,1,5,11,1,4,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,22,5,0,0,14,0,2,4,8,6,0,3,3,7,38,9,25,43,3,19,0,3,3,2,29,8,0,6,7,144,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969706485031725,0.09332896980910624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624676423734308,0.0,0.06837379379450856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660620910847023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616877659780115,0.09934351863180556,0.0,0.1250918880215661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013962075834366,0.08012958609654837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34662879133949565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047641379013064,0.0,0.11511205168075543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518079154465378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4314946646499577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469471978189835,0.0,0.1095947853191606,0.0,0.09904237510599248,0.0,0.18837808608424345,0.0,0.0,0.09535734824310044,0.2024637729366226,0.0,0.29947987668618203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303436942917072,0.11898768799003835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245303630236704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280145553857285,0.08530535268623714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15552001737502086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10742157356273477,0.1141105450252296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074786847225056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10210938595057772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433650507166188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195513064260367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725758392683025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901527268144794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451640760567776,0.21560941595544872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18509317437597989,0.13231380948196522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121006140757777,0.0,0.0,0.10812155649834278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThePakinator,2020/01/17,"I have a lot of confusion on my identity, who I am and how to manage my mind (Long post) As strange as it sounds I have struggled for the past decade with who I am and what my personality is. 

I have developed social anxiety over the years and I've seen there are mental techniques that help me deal with it (i.e focusing my attention outwards/ or actively changing my thoughts). Over the years I've come across many different techniques/ ways of thinking that make me more able to deal with anxiety and the stresses of life. The issue is whenever I adopt a new technique it feels as though i'm a different person. I feel a distinct difference in myself and my thinking everytime a new technique is used. The change is so noticeable to me that I refer to them as different personalities because of how different I feel and think whenever I shift from one technique to another. 

There are other examples of different techniques that i am using such as: faking confidence, trying to find the humor in things and life, thinking more positively, trying to be more talkative, forcing myself to have more energy, trying to enjoy social situations more, forcing myself to concentrate on the outside world so i dont miss something out, trying to put myself in the shoes of someone else so i can see where they are coming from and there are a few others too that i have experimented on throughout the years. 

​

The change in me feels so strong that even my interests change depending on which technique I use, my skill in certain tasks such as video games (I quite like the video game Fifa and I notice I am far better at it when I use one personality/technique vs when I use another, to the point other people have even stated it's like they're playing against another player, further adding to my belief that each technique is distinct and has it's own strengths and weaknesses. 

My video game online multiplayer record would also change, I could be in one personality/ way of thinking for a few days and notice I am winning a lot of my online games consistently however for one reason or another I would change my thinking technique/ personality and then I can see a noticable difference in how I play. My play style changes and as a result my win/ loss ratio also changes. I would begin to lose many of my online games then. If i wanted to start winning again i would just change the technique my mind is using into one i know which is better at the game. 

This doesn't just happen with online gaming, this effects pretty much every aspect of my life: the shows i am interested in, my hobbies, taste in music, people i am attracted to, career aspirations etc. 

I notice my friendships/ relationships change depending on which personality/ technique I have. For example I could be talking with my brother and see that the personality I am in/ the technique i am using doesnt gel that well worth my brother, so I change my personality to one I know has a better connection with him. In the past i've even categorised which personality works with which person. This became quite confusing though however when I would be in a situation where I would be interacting with multiple people and where i've categorised one person preferring one personality and the other person preffering another. it could get to the point where I would switch my personality mid conversation according to who was talking. As you could imagine, that was extremeley confusing for me and lead to me withdrawing from many many social situations. In all honesty i've become more of a recluse as time has gone on because socialising became such a drain for me to do. 

​

For many years I was jumping from technique to technique or personality to personality but all the confusion and feeling like I wasnt the same person as I was at the start of the day as I was to the end of the day was very difficult to deal with for me. I began having strange fantasies of suicide just so I didn't have to deal with this anymore (just to clarify none of them were serious thoughts, I just thought about them when I was low because that was one way out of this mental pain I was going through). 

​

Anyway so I thought screw it all and screw the techniques, I'm just going to let myself be. I'm just going to let my mind be it's natural self and not try and change it so at least I can feel like the same person day in day out rather than chopping and changing all the time. I wanted to have my relationships mean something and i wanted the accomplishments i have made to feel like i had made them, not some other version of me. 

​

So i kept it as a rule to just let myself be, not change my personality and to try and be myself. When doing this i felt more natural and more like my genuine self. Like i wasn't trying to be something else and i could just let myself be. I've been trying to do this now for the past 4 or 5 years however i've been finding it difficult as I would get really anxious and my mind/ thoughts would get away from me. Without using the techniques the anxiety builds up and i start feeling so low and even paranoid that I feel I just have to change my personality to deal with the stresses of life. I got to the point where i would last around a month or two without shifting or changing the techniques i used/ the personality i am in, but i would get quite down and more and more anxious as time would go on. 

​

This inevitabley lead me to changing my approach/ personality several times just so i could feel calm again. Every time i changed the technique i was in, it feels like pressing a reset button and all the events/ situations that took place in the past personality were meaningless as it was a different ""me"" living through them. 

​

I have struggled to hold a job down becuase i simply cannot decide which personality/ technique to stick with. I believe i preform to an addequate standard when i have a job, however because i keep changing my personality i struggle with any long term commitments. I recently had to leave a well paying job because i simply could not handle the anxiety. 

​

I recently discovered meditation and i like the concept of developing a seperation from your own thoughts/ feelings, that you can just observe them and not get too attached to them. Using this approach/ technique i feel calmer in general and dont wake up feeling sick from my anxious thoughts anymore. However the same issue arises in me, i feel as though it's just another technique. I don't really feel genuine/ natural when using this approach in my day to day life. It's like there is my base self and i have to attach a technique in order to feel okay in my regular day to day activities. I just don't feel natural when using a technique. Another issue is i find it quite draining having a techanique being played in the back of my mind 24/7. I've read the human brain uses about 25% or your bodies resources and i add more pressure onto it by having a constant technique playing in the background as well. 

​

I felt like meditation would have been the answer but it kind of just feels like another technique that although helpful, makes me feel unnatural and disingenious. 

So i often think i can't win if i let myself be and just try and be natural becuase i get anxious stressed easily, but i can't use different techniques because they just make me feel like i am not being my true self. 

​

I know this is a very strange post and i appreciate if you have read it all, my writing style isn't the best and thanks for sticking it out to read it all. The weird thing is i would have wrote this completely differently if i were using a different technique/ in a different personality. 

​

I just want to know if anyone has any advice or if has any knowledge of a feeling like this. I thought this could be linked to a disorder called dissociative identity disorder, previously known as multiple personality disorder, but after seeing around 6 or 7 different therapist/ councellors over the last few years they have ruled this out. 

​

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Thank you",6.805207120849026,7.321432414698164,7.331589638251739,72.00319411160564,64.74803149606299,10.431861234736962,35.06915439917836,10.301013174806043,3.689645292707976,6456,282,1140,145,92,2126,448,1524,0.086,0.81,0.10400000000000001,0.971,19,0,3,0,0,1,117.0,0,6,10,22,78,70,2,11,83,1,136,15,4,30,12,266,239,113,1,35,48,2,25,14,0,15,8,1,0,32,69,69,1,3,59,20,2,15,22,25,3,10,41,32,182,45,185,153,37,149,1,5,5,2,80,70,2,25,71,847,251,13,0.02004581810648694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039177082904157536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032061266994806006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545273748512165,0.16815830489384154,0.061339983934582176,0.09058427458022664,0.039760130179254886,0.014016502108542026,0.0,0.0,0.03569005615002106,0.0,0.0,0.018833705979025138,0.015413996769381256,0.0,0.07331846795494541,0.02213903117867197,0.0,0.02258477249550991,0.021036849374061545,0.05318669132717456,0.0,0.0222663849100987,0.0,0.02237776255692134,0.0204690215435483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029105339446982,0.03453539464140015,0.02101765889700206,0.02166240796576313,0.0,0.12803963691971984,0.0,0.0,0.11635104896575613,0.10333179129434372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722669740229764,0.06892273271480774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046987099054679314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033491417609544084,0.0,0.01775464492830914,0.0,0.022356386061442118,0.05296029521088571,0.0,0.03377893264752172,0.0,0.0,0.01960865659906284,0.0,0.0,0.222986894769794,0.10024515522432682,0.038494257972584565,0.0,0.05496454376614235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283867560005023,0.0,0.045570001543904295,0.0,0.016032471960091714,0.02210058523035647,0.0,0.0,0.01772645074923546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02687257865813513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276787810837461,0.059677144050636975,0.01781764418275164,0.0,0.020874634824306286,0.04406662955156775,0.032680034472978486,0.0,0.02122562698712897,0.0,0.10249103579805972,0.07079477076941433,0.13710723842824485,0.0,0.017700824644440533,0.03547983643826497,0.0,0.02242614293946836,0.0,0.03408447541779206,0.0,0.037935675559925434,0.040142217733225946,0.10161656622207248,0.0,0.021835772550912742,0.0,0.0,0.040402939649204835,0.0,0.10120280933581632,0.0,0.016000380764337612,0.0,0.014735982809660866,0.0,0.0,0.03872075208128824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411148388511605,0.0,0.0,0.12225208624925203,0.0,0.02133016380056492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765440064569584,0.041691738813456086,0.4725873495180618,0.0209436133863828,0.0,0.056849332474941124,0.0,0.03839670514017775,0.020393803615993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020151583889131876,0.0,0.08528478017908894,0.06015372836866718,0.0,0.025683728763048086,0.02061043963975966,0.039585654069280565,0.04304341341672797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389568676020309,0.0,0.08364864046219281,0.022646068645056663,0.0,0.0,0.09012935775418364,0.0,0.06130256139048975,0.016984756630487888,0.04629675038531315,0.0,0.0,0.04256559969309308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888725073969346,0.06286872449590551,0.0,0.021926871440562486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03222413854379993,0.0,0.036910992143706536,0.0,0.02327473985292692,0.026635101647152475,0.08991185579584332,0.0590847435343373,0.12731312349551754,0.058444388710457526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022271641497609625,0.12248815187021064,0.0,0.019581851518744774,0.0,0.0,0.2596972601017805,0.0,0.03307979861151213,0.04729417155377718,0.04773431207069848,0.0,0.0,0.054070793651117915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03864690663593224,0.0,0.014593594326063872,0.0,0.0,0.2135996106034427,0.0,0.0,0.07745309779568754
mentalhealth,Lily-rose22,2020/01/17,"I feel disgusting I'm actually beginning to really hate myself. I can never do anything right I always mess stuff up. 

I hate myself because I can feel myself giving up. I no longer want help or to fix things. 

I'm disgusting and I deserve a miserable life. I deserve everything that happens to me.",1.2377192982456149,3.8721664561403517,4.062456140350879,77.21719298245615,94.96491228070177,7.445614035087719,25.63157894736842,8.167268648758528,2.8258631578947364,236,11,39,7,9,83,37,57,0.349,0.5529999999999999,0.098,-0.9537,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,6,13,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,2,12,0,5,13,0,5,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,28,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.25274544738826393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21550773217908498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21313392708131348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15788325180567045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23277140232633936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261915129521142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24845522914673265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290317650103256,0.0,0.0,0.5114153473764357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17360142217744706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18293849718923225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19975582521785748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592124994060292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22118354221461095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29649163716589017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720672803533405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15276419034602706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,M1xvisbadatreddit,2020/01/17,"Need advice on how to get rid of perfectionism Im currently at my lowest moment as of now. I just had a mental breakdown in front of my teacher and a couple of my friends. They were so nice to calm me down, but i really felt as if everything i did was out of my control.

Basically i went on a fit of rage due to me not being able to get signatures from my teachers for my research papers, i had searched on every nook and cranny of my school only to be told that they were away on an important meeting. At the same time one of the teachers had mention that you need to include one more page naming the teachers that had examined my team at the presentation last sunday. I didn't have that page, while the paper had to be collected today

I don't blame them AT ALL, i knew that i should've finished my research papers a day before it was collected. In which case i could've done small revisions. However my research paper was done on the day it was supposed to be collected, so no window of time was available to us to revise or edit a few things. 

And then IT happened, the stress built up to the point i was unable to handle it, i was absolutely frustrated at myself, the only reason this research paper wasn't going to get a perfect score is due to a few minor mistakes that could've been cleaned up easily a day prior.

I was able to calm myself down, but not in a good way. Basically, in a fit of rage i punched the wall multiple times until i calmed down, i usually do this so the shock of the punch would in some way negate the anger and dissapointment i felt. I know and fully understand that it's unhealthy, but as of now, i really don't know any alternatives.

The teacher later stopped me and told to not hurt yourself, but i just felt like it was somewhat a reminder not to make another stupid mistake.

I really hate this perfectionist motto that somehow im living by. While i am considered an overachiever at school, most of my other friends that are equally if not more intelligent than me never had gone into this state of mania. I just really want to get rid of this THING and i would love advice on how to handle and let go of mistakes.

Because most of the time, when i try to let go, i keep convincing myself that every moment is an opportunity, and its either you don't do it, or you do it with the pretense that failure is not an option.

I really want to become better and especially happier this year, and these last few days weren't any better. I have never been to a psychiatrist so my condition had never been diagnosed. Is it necesarry though? Because i had gone to counseling with my teacher at school.

I dont know if how my friends would accept me now, knowing my ill condition. And especially i dont want to end up hurting anybody else. So im in dire need of advice on how to control oneself

TL;DR, i wanted to turn in my research paper immediately, however do to minor mistakes it wont guarantee a perfect score, this made me go into a state of anger in which i hurt myself just to calm down. However i realize it isn't healthy and currently affecting my life in school.

I just want to get rid of this thing. So any advice is appreciated.",6.252999999999999,5.8788671888888935,7.3880952380952385,74.15357142857142,66.0,10.438095238095238,32.920634920634924,10.025080133382057,3.1551873015873007,2499,94,478,51,35,852,250,630,0.135,0.715,0.15,0.7206,6,0,0,0,0,2,52.0,1,3,3,8,21,34,7,1,34,0,57,4,0,10,6,92,95,41,0,18,21,0,3,1,3,4,3,0,2,0,38,18,0,4,13,1,0,8,21,16,0,2,38,3,70,18,93,47,15,88,0,3,0,1,17,39,0,11,38,364,108,17,0.1374303206770564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685906376137207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018599612035293,0.07205383700014817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456015510280479,0.0,0.0,0.08377624790261469,0.07589049591794021,0.05847154033738437,0.0,0.0,0.12154595048230747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413979057667934,0.109726928253658,0.07603201793134352,0.0,0.17726237501988007,0.0,0.0,0.06974444130084427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14063893284082088,0.16106731230588994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057402699126050935,0.0,0.06086123631978861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11579097249154775,0.0,0.061756755333152724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979319897033412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15926748726666515,0.0,0.1795041758161391,0.0,0.15620963664750798,0.05763501632325708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060764589352058515,0.0,0.0,0.06784199469071124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206830010294332,0.0,0.2226724942389793,0.0,0.0,0.061077191779786676,0.0,0.0,0.15105622026145246,0.1120240539323587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14053181408139095,0.048535549895820124,0.03357075640458773,0.0,0.06067674549901737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620181150245003,0.0650199461753846,0.045867903107932255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924871964304025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528542621131506,0.15899210342500902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093126342015428,0.10452195172233014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495803722256564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22010345632551145,0.07065062932180034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781736431596647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057448950904211635,0.07871298400349168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13695389761055482,0.0,0.06751229614667878,0.0,0.16027345034430904,0.0,0.06513393734811845,0.13132056085393434,0.0,0.04665308328827278,0.0747423623933041,0.0,0.0715349052826944,0.08265587721271195,0.0,0.07568004110815936,0.0,0.20264990958039247,0.10908579169856672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636996420615481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146439835110676,0.0,0.0,0.04425031034298437
mentalhealth,Planetof12,2020/01/17,"Silence & therapy Helo me understand, please. Why do therapists love silence?

After reading in r/psychotherapy, I found out many therapists have no problem with silence. They think it's a good thing, it 'gives us time away from the chaos' or such bullshit.

The thing is, all the silence made me VERY uncomfortable. My depression worsened BECAUSE of the silence. I was paying precious money just to be ignored. My silence was not a sign I needed silence, but a sign I need help in speaking. Yet I keep hearing how good silence is.

Maybe they're just scam artists?",3.893422459893049,6.833638823529411,4.222442067736186,81.3055347593583,77.43137254901961,6.454188948306596,33.7825311942959,7.686295010490155,2.841968627450982,448,25,73,7,11,140,74,102,0.195,0.665,0.14,-0.6579999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,1,0,5,7,0,0,7,0,7,1,0,2,1,20,17,3,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,2,3,2,2,0,2,3,0,0,4,2,11,4,9,12,1,7,0,1,0,1,7,4,0,1,3,48,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18882626531306929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373655786856894,0.0,0.0,0.10623607115623324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010230580192946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19108291040731068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671799073106153,0.0,0.2923462364810494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19641994143623767,0.0,0.11681247268688555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549031152477243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15728947155468487,0.1649026735236976,0.0,0.17668691222168978,0.1750820827231889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584445539625618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913009836411656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667570872457995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17432158487581725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929799171528934,0.4046920763283484,0.2315603666660797,0.11166801384088472,0.0,0.0,0.10162081796158846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18142582123278744,0.20963067391745727,0.0,0.0,0.14379465108106204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572555607743054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adam_crane,2020/01/17,"how to decipher mental sickness vs. ""normal"" challenges I have a suspicion my wife, prone to rage attacks, paranoia, delusions I am being unfaithful (without basing on any observed behavior), self-harm during emotional outbursts.. is suffering or maybe will down the road from some sort of mental sickness- be that PTSD, bipolar.. I don't know... Our relationship is not great, sure, but the behaviors when challenges come up seem extreme and I need to talk about it with her, but unsure of whether to do so in terms of mental health/sickness or not. How do you suggest? Recruit the help of a professional to evaluate?",5.939444444444442,8.410691092592598,5.8066666666666675,74.805,68.62962962962962,8.503703703703705,36.074074074074076,9.150863307647796,3.774640740740741,490,26,75,10,9,153,84,108,0.146,0.787,0.067,-0.7676,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,1,0,2,5,7,2,0,5,0,10,3,0,2,1,21,14,10,0,2,9,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,0,8,4,17,11,2,8,0,1,0,0,8,5,0,5,2,55,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348790604526136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256421550574061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17085368933686554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22310755602923324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21867226723876554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21082780064496576,0.0,0.0,0.1329441650634446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900333286622972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19926075332378854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5996449182757772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706775163404515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943326143502189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23185066663519385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21294460538997206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805627046674252,0.2069135010527164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18693457057192425,0.0,0.0,0.1594194307920408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19119418349692016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,koiroels,2020/01/17,"Anyone else feel they lack in social instinct? Ever since getting a job as a cashier I’ve begun to realize just how long it takes me to process events as they happen before me. I don’t think I lack in common sense but I can’t seem to ever find the right words or make decisions about conversations. I’m not exactly shy, the indecisiveness applies to my actions as well. I never know which actions and conversations to prioritize. I feel that it may relate to the fact that I have never really felt obligated to socialize and forcing myself to stresses me out to the max. Going from social settings in which I have autonomy over involvement towards a setting in which my action and communication is not optional has got me messed up.
I’m quick-witted and I can learn things quickly but the actual processing of social information specifically is slow. Like I hear someone speaking clearly yet it takes a while for my brain to actually interpret the speech noises into words. I’m just wondering if anyone else deals with this issue?",6.506991542488924,7.8905098481675395,7.4384293193717275,67.90136528393073,65.70157068062827,10.274828836085383,33.01691502215062,10.389873798559362,3.7744857833266217,835,35,135,21,13,280,123,191,0.073,0.865,0.062,-0.2846,1,0,0,1,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,9,5,0,2,10,0,9,1,1,2,7,44,27,13,0,3,8,0,3,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,10,7,0,0,13,0,0,4,6,3,1,0,2,6,19,2,27,24,2,28,0,0,0,0,13,10,0,7,13,98,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.2568066753312536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18400793228234413,0.2696390192436993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119650964755078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688706873218146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13565345410618074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21983682005016755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380437279890689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306185002801044,0.0,0.12633766897451734,0.0,0.12026195942622253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687452468227882,0.0,0.0747800850495973,0.0,0.10523674137477093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163559754000178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830049817985538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733558932930304,0.13057308920867344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231306109437981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428346094368646,0.0,0.0,0.1164443755325771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783083474415293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029655919912368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842936737424113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236880960879728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978571251583425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884453771906988,0.0,0.0,0.5365179547043127,0.11148751392083238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507247251735439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19786393655738724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741606754433663,0.08431130750914148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830644169232553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14269316200284968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BuyMyArt,2020/01/17,"North Carolinians, I need recommendations for a good mental hospital I'm voluntarily checking myself in to try to combat severe chronic depression, anxiety and OCD. Mental healthcare in this state is a sick joke and all of the choices I've found are god awful. I can't afford to go out of state because Medicaid.   


I'm going the end of next week. Please be honest with me. Thank you.",4.587499999999999,6.7229560833333375,6.1344444444444415,72.45500000000001,71.5,8.688888888888886,28.66666666666667,9.2995712137729,2.8580666666666668,306,12,51,7,6,104,57,72,0.19899999999999998,0.619,0.182,-0.34,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,4,1,4,2,0,0,1,7,11,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,5,4,11,9,1,11,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,28,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921083869999491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15308223350860867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21629184868065734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22242041684079086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753433781211534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854379453871722,0.21063003531324173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5061457840838541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862045025203466,0.0,0.0,0.2670721307256821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756576135530893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836974801905182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312002941134633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704960145298903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20143570144555373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Peanut_The_Iguana,2020/01/17,"Vent about something. No need to respond if you don't want too. So I'm going to assume these are just panic attacks but I feel like I should post about it because one just happened and I'm honestly still feeling it and I don't know what else would calm me down except for writing.

So earlier I was dropping my friends off at there house and I got out of the car to say goodbye. At this point I'm trying to keep myself level because I already know something was up with my feelings at that point. but then my friend put out his hand for a handshake and for some reason when I put my hand in his I literally squeezed it as hard as I could and dropped to the ground laughing, so much so it hurt. When I laugh like that it usually means I'm trying to cry or at least that's what it feels like, so when I heard my other friend chuckle it made it a whole lot worse knowing that they couldn't understand the pain I was actually in. After I thought I calmed myself down and they went in I punched the nearest tree a couple times and as soon as I got home I threw up. I'm still feeling gutted and kinda frightened because I can still feel that knot in my throat like I'm about to cry. This isn't the first time this has happened and I'm afraid it may happen again tonight. Every day I have that knot and I try not to think about it but obviously when your trying to talk to someone like that it doesn't go very well. Especially if they ask if I'm ok cause then that just gets me thinking about it. Anyway. hhh sorry I always feel bad posting about myself. ANYWAY. Yea, that's it.",1.8805504587155968,3.781449333333338,2.914822629969418,93.57883944954128,78.60244648318044,5.338593272171254,22.82660550458716,6.079149491110277,0.2577552293577985,1240,39,271,8,30,395,168,327,0.105,0.701,0.19399999999999998,0.9887,0,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,3,1,28,22,1,2,8,2,16,5,4,3,1,57,55,32,0,9,12,0,11,5,3,3,1,2,1,0,29,13,0,1,17,0,0,7,7,6,1,2,10,13,39,16,42,40,5,49,0,1,0,0,16,20,0,9,23,184,68,0,0.0,0.0,0.09156480049537193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035440273106076,0.0,0.07807429453664713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771862877869498,0.10674546875641816,0.0,0.0,0.07834434944430069,0.17159417037022442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963895257685681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491582913750082,0.10382140017911312,0.20613627366773027,0.060512756580580834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783831438317009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07905604256767905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3321037981178197,0.13406471578541154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981197289033229,0.0,0.0,0.21747908290380505,0.0,0.04902243917308047,0.0,0.10665180038269836,0.0,0.1500892640946276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24892137231723474,0.0,0.08405348457485362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411940319824563,0.0,0.0,0.10826752441021928,0.10044723607227976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340064807054925,0.0,0.0,0.15469997430033405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292036322213288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977113331683898,0.0,0.0887844625877828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220866255877784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689760387892308,0.06957395032472839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358181385065509,0.0,0.09984201425125523,0.11008959555124112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773998523470346,0.0,0.17972690775611114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18865065872497272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647313670338624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461759038188752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950207646836549,0.14447023957796395,0.0,0.10503529626801192,0.0,0.0,0.2247989052212756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541721033664278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120245286328645,0.0,0.0744907470546161,0.10942636062421347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548183547639099,0.0,0.0,0.09768061180272733,0.0,0.0,0.10334077730985594,0.07741979281733823,0.05534351956252292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843646740638816,0.08698159288248934,0.0,0.10475813660698914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562105308122222,0.06665432597495784,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,barjarbinks,2020/01/17,"My lack of self-care is my favorite and least favorite thing about myself I'm not a self-centered person at all. I guess I'm kinda vain when it comes to my looks - I shower at least daily, style my hair, and think I'm a pretty good looking guy. But I don't flash that on social media; I don't really use social media at all. I don't talk about myself at all, which is something I think more people could learn to limit. It's something I actually respect about myself. But I frequently disappoint myself so that I don't have to disappoint anybody else.

I over-commit to activities all the time. I just got recruited to a start-up as the lead (and only) web/mobile designer even though I know the company won't go anywhere. The guy already spent probably $4,000 on the company. I won't get any money for it until the company makes some, which I know it won't. I over-commit to people to the point of making my own life miserable. I have been trying to work up the courage to end things with my girlfriend of 5 years, but I am her whole world. I'm not the one saying that - she says it all the time. I'm afraid that she will hurt herself and not recover, even though I know the breakup is inevitable at some point.

On top of that, I'm not capable of any of the things I am doing against my will. I guess it's my vanity, I just pretend to know what I'm doing and try to push through. The fact is I can hardly remember what I did yesterday. I live in a fog where time just melds together and nothing matters. Life just happens and I watch it while my body and mouth seem to move on their own. I live for sleep - dreams in particular. They're the only thing I'm interested in. 

Sorry for the rant, I'm just feeling really bad about myself tonight.",3.3868220885259963,4.436535756983243,4.777206703910616,85.3368844005157,72.71508379888269,7.965792866351527,25.50107434464977,8.384062270229773,1.5164611946712512,1363,42,287,22,26,455,172,358,0.094,0.836,0.07,-0.7981,1,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,1,4,17,11,0,2,19,0,23,6,4,4,6,51,53,18,0,2,12,0,3,0,1,5,2,2,1,3,20,10,0,1,10,2,2,5,11,7,0,1,4,8,45,4,43,43,14,34,0,4,3,0,14,18,0,6,11,193,65,4,0.0,0.0,0.10115864242021083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439301103475585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409867100658101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655299840336166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514452555618597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929517851539825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276524964106813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659585753199732,0.0,0.09181329501591004,0.0,0.0,0.13693484797811192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05241435445318071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05415884016617098,0.0,0.05891320289028749,0.08694632375079513,0.08290754807262657,0.0,0.2283895945688486,0.20528230799094332,0.0916674965225312,0.0,0.09286031689339057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109717487611174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278785340800515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146438325305444,0.0,0.0,0.1830699562471827,0.0,0.1740990557852842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13838967377139824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017573855625676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946597725981672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024369557897872,0.1576784398315084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373162369105758,0.09051319813155403,0.0,0.0,0.1959871930248885,0.0,0.0,0.10546098305273276,0.1117645985348853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281638554598352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742823912954176,0.0,0.0,0.16487152492798018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09436951001222477,0.21628304411172766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10373633414761302,0.2113396307239655,0.0,0.15960732974641406,0.0,0.11604052997651393,0.07337212276808718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331916382169019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754723009311855,0.13284416999357826,0.2036937380222457,0.0,0.18133751221828975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075866868170409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953022810960465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157343304883806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546678554325878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667545886961389
mentalhealth,kate1567,2020/01/17,"ongoing self esteem problem (TW self harm) so I’ve pretty much had a low self esteem like my whole life. Recently my depression, anxiety and ocd have gotten really bad and whenever I’m not working I’m laying in bed miserable. I also get extremely angry with myself over stupid shit, but it’s like I have such an intense hatred for myself for no reason. I mostly get mad at myself for how I look and the stupid things I do. Sometimes I even self harm when I get mad at myself.  I don’t know what to do anymore I feel crazy. I don’t truly know why I hate myself so much, it’s probably something deeper that I’ve chosen to repress. Anyways thanks for reading this far.",2.21235361653272,4.4093973880597055,4.192686567164181,83.3622445464983,78.8507462686567,6.809644087256029,22.99425947187141,7.882392219407189,1.4020282433983922,526,17,98,9,13,179,86,134,0.34600000000000003,0.5539999999999999,0.10099999999999999,-0.9904,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,8,17,6,2,3,0,7,2,1,2,0,14,19,9,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,4,6,4,0,1,4,1,0,0,4,14,0,0,2,2,18,3,11,17,4,8,0,3,1,0,4,6,1,1,4,63,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087252381555165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562734982025935,0.0,0.1498976095604702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620176832904334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018303698877862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983143437833376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07642466858270923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369048395447153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922676862086445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16613332002150316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675988091461053,0.14768597300989225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692575133056436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22222146534568912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15377124763429598,0.16296246498538758,0.14462765206090425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118830593966345,0.0,0.0968288969081174,0.15540470416277838,0.14923982620582193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6307188226867573,0.0,0.1551506374467982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163606554587706,0.14948864669847706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915622166986052,0.0,0.0,0.10041561859350832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13638702200875433,0.16875067800590796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100371097634676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notanameguymyblol,2020/01/17,"How to get help when part of your problem is distrust Basically, title. Ive had counsellors before, when i was younger and my schools saw my behavior and made me, but it was always impossible trying to say anything not surface level to them. Im still a teen, semi reliant on parents I cant really talk to. I dont think my mother really cares how i am as a person, but with her own mental issues she'll probably swallow herself with guilt if I said anything about wanting therapy. But shit, ive smoked an eighth a day for two years now, I only leave my room to make plays and get food, i hear my moms voice bashing me when i get stressed, I attempted suicide last week. I clearly need help. But id rather die than add another reason why im the worst son ever or let her think its her fault, and  i seem retarded whenever i try to communicate anything. The last time i tried a counsellor was after a younger suicide attempt, and the only thing close to my problems i could talk about was how i was trying to trust the girl that i almost offed myself over again. And she said i was doing good and told my ma she should stop bringing me. It wasnt a healthy relationship, i didnt leave til she left me a couple months ago. 

 
Has anyone sorta been there at all? I want help so badly but theres some stupid mental wall in the way i dont know how to get past. I dont know if i can get to a point of complete independence like this.",5.712363013698628,5.070418900684935,6.560376712328768,80.53316780821919,67.18493150684932,9.491780821917807,31.263698630136986,8.841846274778883,2.3152698630136985,1117,38,233,16,16,372,176,292,0.21,0.684,0.106,-0.9894,1,0,1,0,0,2,25.0,0,1,1,2,17,15,3,2,14,0,25,3,1,8,3,48,47,25,3,10,10,5,0,1,0,2,0,5,1,2,6,11,2,1,6,1,0,1,7,10,0,1,15,6,46,5,26,28,5,32,0,0,1,0,28,11,1,7,20,151,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122406750041902,0.0,0.09175375850471014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762431259240982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608157254535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406951188163425,0.0,0.22620993701963155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650684691514714,0.0,0.0,0.07796999824940899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342243305591127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607183989256217,0.0,0.0,0.07315873974317685,0.10138635429817168,0.0,0.059093479452727186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509700650199887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221674506793667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288417390258103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107988156225666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23936329013035296,0.0,0.0,0.07685451923960784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032731623287548,0.0,0.18425206777284495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19795127550743774,0.09563744413804603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100714408765263,0.1493806258326533,0.0,0.19404492646110727,0.0995557742236978,0.09369742300859728,0.0,0.0447655697625518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867020957583719,0.061163436167303825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468206988176608,0.0,0.0,0.1073154215692991,0.07313783264561104,0.0,0.0,0.06794215032138826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393768035832704,0.0,0.0,0.10174377169406733,0.09922587345964316,0.08747077361357644,0.0,0.08000738877906086,0.0,0.0,0.0866195420764428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879215265070752,0.17535420909588526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11740047212962945,0.09421043832187913,0.0,0.0983758453419163,0.0,0.0,0.17432137008912146,0.07286749593323122,0.0,0.09273399650942482,0.0,0.08341610099185552,0.0,0.0,0.0940564163647933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317547702524173,0.0766064067337026,0.10496133998772204,0.0,0.0,0.20045571133357676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14729672291414314,0.0,0.0,0.10478637606604382,0.0,0.06087460153167554,0.11742503165405915,0.0,0.0,0.053429927494071584,0.0,0.0,0.08755596176201827,0.0,0.24884179902409465,0.0,0.08950875609543339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809096530760497,0.07273127181784382,0.07349969803341694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268141684695576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059006426033424986
mentalhealth,BlazeTheBlack,2020/01/17,"A friend is going through a really bad patch and I need advice [NYC, US] A friend of mine who I’ve known for 9+ years is going through a really bad time rn. He told me that he’s been having panic attacks daily. He’s been suffering from depression since I’ve known him. As of right now, he took an entire week off work and has been drinking excessive amounts of alcohol every night. 

My other friend and his family have taken him to a doctor and got him on antidepressants, however he claims they aren’t helping, and dodges whenever we tell him to seek a higher dose. I’ve made an attempt to see him while on break from college, but we mainly communicate over Xbox.

I don’t know what to do at this point to help. He’s not a very open person and trying to pry at him probably would be counter productive. I know it’s even stupider to seek help on the internet of all places, but I wanna know if my approach has been wrong and if I should seek additional resources in helping. Any advice is greatly appreciated.",5.0236050516647515,5.6587298756218924,6.0559203980099525,79.18332950631459,68.65174129353234,9.567699961729813,28.894374282433986,9.661875296680813,2.518527439724456,799,27,158,17,13,266,127,201,0.107,0.784,0.109,0.1272,2,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,3,0,1,2,2,12,2,1,10,0,17,4,0,1,1,27,29,13,0,6,5,0,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,1,6,11,2,0,5,2,0,4,3,8,0,0,9,1,20,4,26,17,3,23,0,2,1,0,28,12,0,2,6,96,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680806731734621,0.0,0.1465923578981091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932798863065974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15604997913760754,0.0,0.0,0.2290614156977503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181437912768915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403986790678971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343737774760107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059908586310828,0.0,0.11557112388104415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293110894799597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3179301823803577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591304641404452,0.0,0.10970688874949214,0.15122973245802054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677669924636055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22615412198191376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979298977254408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170936174789176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872417677329367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093871982744845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197710170982331,0.1433128134895006,0.0,0.12966940695599755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789179830595686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757484423545955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714190627362553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109306241364758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346793367547765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198920894624326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998457213897489,0.0,0.0,0.1310712267114441,0.15240023510590653,0.09312900914680924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16499788229249054,0.0,0.0,0.11317910909691074,0.0,0.0,0.11002900762309673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986094678163096,0.0,0.0,0.09744119632429897,0.14997319052140204,0.0,0.08833258739228571
mentalhealth,SadisticWhistle,2020/01/17,"I have so many questions about my Mental Health I have honestly no clue on how to cope with ANYTHING, unless being angry and suppression of feeling until you can't feel them anymore counts.
I'm so incredibly Sadistic to myself.
I feel like a complete stranger to myself.
Should I try to find someone that understands me or should I try to understand myself better.
Also why is depression my only good friend.
There is so much wrong with me and I'm 15 pls help.",3.8198863636363636,6.164727579545456,4.656818181818182,81.2677272727273,74.3409090909091,7.127272727272729,26.90909090909091,8.07648339933343,1.9687454545454544,369,14,64,6,8,119,64,88,0.126,0.6729999999999999,0.201,0.6621,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,1,7,7,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,1,0,17,15,10,0,2,2,0,3,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,7,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,14,5,12,12,1,2,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,2,2,47,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15990132919786476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19829839119498788,0.0,0.0,0.16454323984175628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17684105955075582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096455885416136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221813524209895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033048133055331,0.14284555850622696,0.0,0.0,0.1827522621690568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544822134534947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16771002758028528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125393427565683,0.0,0.0,0.13402343229623762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768631713274192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20271967430438168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20150431841809546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698753100951278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520723036476674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22399170284595346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941845509456874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715082040091079,0.0,0.0,0.4163136129128728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18042533915993525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186158318499448,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Socially_inept62406,2020/01/17,"This is my one of my first experiences with ptsd, can someone tell me how to deal with this? When I was in the second grade (roughly 6-7 years ago, I’m a freshman now) I was bitten by a dog on my face, and that gave me scars and slight ptsd. I was terrified of any sharp objects all throughout third and fourth grade, and had thoughts of them being pierced in my face. That faded slowly, and the fear was gone by the summer leading to fifth grade. Anyways, in October my mom got me an 8 week old kitten (I named her Ruby) and tonight she bit me in the face, right where I had those scars. and I reacted by screaming and dropping her,  didn’t hurt physically as much as it did psychologically. And I don’t know how the hell to deal with it, I just need some advice on how I deal with it, currently I’m not letting her on my bed, or even in my room. Please give me some advice on how to deal with this.",4.549893048128343,4.280246877005347,5.30096256684492,87.33614973262033,69.53475935828878,8.297326203208556,27.695187165775398,7.686295010490155,1.281036363636363,694,20,160,7,11,226,107,187,0.096,0.8909999999999999,0.012,-0.9477,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,2,10,4,1,1,8,0,13,3,3,6,1,30,22,17,0,1,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,9,14,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,4,0,4,12,3,26,0,26,8,5,26,1,1,0,0,14,12,1,3,11,111,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29039260999850697,0.1317123292256597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104342593697384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16221718888362846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6127416611021052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813950664859517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14534540466671714,0.0,0.16720031232449042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263869889550134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142537019901173,0.0,0.0,0.11883762220399614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590641511076671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165885908748385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193902751595886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17402187026219865,0.0,0.0,0.10922764513782704,0.1101744734882156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591578177517906,0.0,0.10068557027057104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631025674736895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34737765200880394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689144465475038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258962496054908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987052130625876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796051249326865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918655052966955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568437104068836
mentalhealth,pugzei,2020/01/17,"Any ideas to help cope with my depression? I'm 15 years old and was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Major Depressive Disorder last year, and things are only getting worse. I tried Sertraline and Fluoxetine but neither helped whatsoever even after taking them daily for many weeks. I find absolutely NOTHING fun or enjoy anything. Every day feels like a blur and I don't know a way to explain to my mom how I'm feeling. I used to smoke weed because it was the only thing that helped, and it worked miracles. However, it is illegal here and I know it isn't good at my age, AND I gotta start saving for a car so I decided to stop. Any suggestions are welcome because it is getting worse day after day after day. My next appointment with my psychiatrist is February 25th, a month and 9 days from now and it feels like way too long to wait. Please help",4.04790877796902,6.10880695783133,5.3836833046471595,77.5831325301205,72.79518072289156,9.321170395869194,29.327022375215147,9.784248007369934,3.1060685025817563,689,29,126,19,14,230,105,166,0.184,0.7040000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.9084,1,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,1,6,9,0,0,5,0,9,1,0,2,0,31,24,14,0,0,2,1,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,13,0,2,9,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,3,13,7,16,21,2,24,0,2,0,0,9,1,0,2,22,71,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644580428114563,0.0,0.0925026533139849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950597947763257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742211931414595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3899135443268349,0.0,0.20829460083023893,0.12273017238613534,0.0,0.0,0.2771671479001226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798658152979548,0.0,0.101879416836578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18342073826474264,0.17276902079795425,0.0,0.0,0.11051771477438893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635030423093646,0.0,0.0,0.1014210646310739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32419764960060005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13650275784876845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290776732096118,0.09856506980396214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181497663131509,0.0,0.0,0.10700945123121897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12259281979887905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416187937232143,0.09651633924871887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285986577897381,0.0,0.0,0.11602497809079072,0.0,0.12688408016845207,0.0,0.0,0.1839285957956568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327326779328411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558704364212069,0.0,0.0,0.10109364296809087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091598959853228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606663331556724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209601865783586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443513491800696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19195964252252293,0.0969938748998104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803042387415773,0.0,0.2464534476760463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573565764498334
mentalhealth,Pesky_YT,2020/01/17,Am I ok? I have been really paranoid and I have not been able to concentrate or think straight. I have been more sensitive lately when people say things about me and I take to personally. I have trouble talking to people and I get really upset when someone doesn’t seem interested in what I’m saying and when someone doesn’t laugh at my jokes or doesn’t laugh enough. It feels like every time I try to talk to someone I have to be perfect or they won’t like me. I really just want people to like me which makes me sounds like a really unlike able trait. I don’t want to self diagnose myself because I feel like that would be selfish so I’m asking you guys for advice,3.1762299465240598,4.806700794117654,4.502406417112301,84.80355614973263,74.14705882352942,7.592513368983957,23.39304812834225,8.296473431620573,1.3305088235294114,532,15,107,9,11,176,78,136,0.076,0.679,0.245,0.9655,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,1,1,6,14,0,1,1,1,17,1,0,1,1,18,29,11,0,3,5,0,2,5,0,2,1,3,0,3,5,4,0,0,4,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,3,5,20,11,12,22,2,8,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,4,10,70,25,0,0.2820773982057069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13782138444274672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185214483628244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597588189922288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431513107481034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457306781939919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883118694336715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142626808010301,0.2015161496398862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368689912360729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13965048618451031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909779580134245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3445219212089269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414442683460172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29333542658869777,0.12314955194038538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614120085903216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22431926881092776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839633462015265,0.1471341225616053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35850489618590964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604354924267248,0.22672312777580886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369984469656052,0.09037190349204084,0.0,0.0,0.0822407996500474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09575601866748112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16637655783510674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018984524470212,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SanktaJasmine,2020/01/17,"I'm so alone and i'm tired I’m so tired of constantly feeling like I have to prove myself to everyone I meet in order for them to determine if they want to keep me in their life or not. I'm tired of there always being someone better and being left behind. When I'm alone with people, things seem to go okay but the minute we get into a group, I'm ignored for everyone else. I'll try to add something meaningful and contribute to the conversation so I'm not sitting there like a rock but when I do, no one responds or even acknowledges me so I end up being that way anyways or even sometimes just leaving.

I can slowly feel the few people I'm the closest with slowly slipping away from me. My mom is always with her boyfriend and when we're alone and I try to talk to her, she looks at me like she could care less what I'm saying. My cousin/best friend and I have a great time alone but when were with our mutual friends its like I don't exist. I'll say something and she'll give me one word answers and won't even look at me sometimes. The guy I have been talking to for like the last 5 years (its a long story, I'll explain if you want) went from telling me he loves me everyday and making me feel like a guy could actually be attracted to me for once. I finally met someone who I didn't feel like was a fuck boy. And then all of a sudden it all changes and I don't have a clue why. I don't get any responses and go like a whole month and half without talking to him and when he does respond, its a couple words and I won't get another response for another 3 weeks.

I'm just so alone right now and whenever I address anything, I'm overreacting. But I really don't feel like I am. I just really want one person who won't leave me. Its something I've dealt with my whole life and I'm tired of feeling like I'm not good enough for people.",1.1573966886525788,3.098703948849103,2.939007268811416,92.31803843047516,81.1227621483376,6.161825279310809,22.05417956656347,7.273561745256523,0.6513846547314586,1448,46,324,20,38,481,182,391,0.08800000000000001,0.735,0.177,0.9881,0,5,3,0,0,0,26.0,2,1,3,1,20,21,1,0,16,1,26,8,0,1,3,65,65,37,0,7,16,1,6,10,2,4,6,2,1,4,10,25,0,2,12,1,0,3,13,2,0,4,6,10,45,19,38,49,7,34,0,0,2,2,38,10,1,6,28,196,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.06823024231032791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3620717201012522,0.0,0.0,0.11635536812451405,0.0,0.0,0.047546888531613235,0.1466310124092493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05753686026625157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656906092593165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337501465816683,0.06183711553566738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128643702338401,0.0,0.07396436357046075,0.0,0.0,0.07555691794698541,0.0,0.11164825669421218,0.07736334544382538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061186035894513185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05840782558088524,0.0,0.06192692207377399,0.07224436554817859,0.0,0.13854126995096674,0.0,0.0,0.13361999575486336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121169691082425,0.2497484839648129,0.0,0.07659215567044171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080375169182654,0.06463840550257377,0.10958838610449392,0.06707207058771646,0.07947244075863012,0.05864421067323185,0.0,0.07708524866993359,0.0,0.13846035574561086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621466589334138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05699280262568225,0.0,0.14806691473768718,0.07596651251059246,0.0,0.09877082353087044,0.34158583386328656,0.0,0.0,0.06187555637340271,0.1174276411587739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310405782926629,0.0,0.04667105424095338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188754875137227,0.055808175085718906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446078110972366,0.14213548903368053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454177805890323,0.06105002294460194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958299510328188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05970990510929501,0.0,0.11120378671335192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365105719879226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848321434140995,0.1614797291050806,0.13830210952308444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16859320965477964,0.0611117362938864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046450657582577284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04076996323988487,0.32144351908966495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493996599457152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371899669834935,0.0554979468900193,0.05608429821091443,0.0,0.0,0.06481502855685806,0.06309045292726648,0.15612272414735565,0.0,0.06739881268534381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04502513728035005
mentalhealth,Farfieldlands,2020/01/17,"Beat these problems in my fucking ass unlucky life NASTY INSOMNIA, poor eyesight, had to wear fucking braces, ANXIETY ATTACKS, feelings of sadness cuz of all of the above",15.483103448275864,11.158925586206898,12.402758620689655,57.79310344827587,51.75862068965517,14.358620689655172,63.48275862068966,11.20814326018867,7.638282758620687,138,10,19,2,1,41,26,29,0.516,0.484,0.0,-0.9733,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,1,0,1,6,2,1,1,4,4,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,1,0,5,3,1,1,0,1,0,3,0,1,3,0,0,11,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28979890461861024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4309663664558556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19154452018088955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.700432355938306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675742079565204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3624828832448763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LucidFeverDreams,2020/01/17,"So I think there might be something wrong with me but I’m not sure what it is?? Help?? Recently I’ve been doing a lot of self reflection about my whole life up until this point, and lately I’ve realized that there’s something not quite right with me mentally. I know I’m not a complete sociopath because I feel huge amounts of empathy for others and if I were to ever hurt even a tiny animal I’d probably cry for weeks. But, with that being said, I’ve always had this strange connection to loving the darker side of life. I’m not just talking about regular stuff like dark poetry or whatever, I mean that I love blood and gore and just the idea of going insane gives me an adrenaline rush and happiness. I also have this strong craving for mental power over others that I can’t explain. I’ve researched extensively trying to find out what all this means with no luck. I hope someone on here can help me understand what I’m experiencing :(  Maybe it’s a personality disorder of some kind??",4.693323464100665,6.059821222797929,5.682801628423388,78.87358808290155,69.9326424870466,9.244855662472245,28.293486306439675,9.606745405546679,2.5917849000740194,788,28,149,18,14,260,127,193,0.13,0.6579999999999999,0.212,0.9738,1,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,3,11,11,0,0,7,0,11,5,1,0,3,39,28,12,0,2,10,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,2,16,10,0,0,11,0,0,2,6,2,0,0,4,3,14,9,22,21,5,15,0,1,0,2,10,8,0,7,6,97,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10914160382957472,0.1135608335203154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08319587187271148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309484407670806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991494444750567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564158935667317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014259417040836,0.12345238682094607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900750177094768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473864411678773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309223693697342,0.07756373221032782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528363041889322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18295698259587856,0.0,0.0,0.13555369250289429,0.0,0.0,0.14610278480102998,0.15406732727886088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212109112534874,0.07500487465765134,0.0,0.15395340579622413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927972422492901,0.0666763770980228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602892404065608,0.24635389053772005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371107417933843,0.29732963921238703,0.0,0.0,0.2750759434091049,0.14478185127771076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916753999015085,0.0,0.0,0.12901605591488244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714663209702702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14516141380979153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13475580283411545,0.0,0.0,0.11655167617834905,0.12982206492577092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237657513170313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156375747475458,0.21013524262652666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15623493926604026,0.0,0.0,0.12862913147927146,0.0,0.0,0.10969604424137393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744974913580776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265977020670416,0.0,0.0,0.1420786670046093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947461651133814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523730874768355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14921753702944338,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StellarEclipses,2020/01/17,"I don't want to live anymore I am a perfectionist. One who has been failing at life. I just got denied my dream job even though the interviews went seemingly fantastic. My boyfriend of 5 years is never going to propose to me. My parents live on the opposite side of the country and never want to talk to me. I don't have any friends where I currently live. I just wake up, go to my shitty job, come home, sleep, repeat. I dread waking up in the mornings. It hurts to breathe at this point. I can't do anything right and I'm miserable. How do people actually enjoy living? It's just a never-ending chore.",1.2643211334120394,3.71215262809918,3.188978748524203,87.5930785123967,84.70247933884298,6.101770956316411,23.518890200708384,7.447530270364453,1.23851546635183,472,18,94,8,14,158,81,121,0.191,0.72,0.08900000000000001,-0.8956,4,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,2,6,0,10,5,4,1,2,12,19,4,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,4,3,0,0,1,1,0,4,5,4,0,1,3,0,14,2,15,16,0,19,0,3,0,0,5,10,0,1,5,61,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.15077749554117814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507072129343804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15323039365289026,0.0,0.0,0.1271468984792829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309493937775713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684820543930545,0.0,0.0,0.10205106027760713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11937247819914296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17562088564233488,0.0,0.1235741421669468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549840967193404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16540398283046914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066506484002229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091335520749724,0.0,0.0,0.5457334905132812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.357498226266865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469860254707504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17156282143382015,0.0,0.0,0.10711637548565454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605997775101698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194896641922288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065825751185215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461955879584738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418765763418005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180330094208008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822656136184816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323044075945965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949807014684024
mentalhealth,chcade,2020/01/17,"Help with Depersonalization. I think it started in October of 2019 or something. I can't even tell if I really am depersonalized or it's not a real thought. I'm 15 years old. February of last year, my parents had a pretty rough divorce. I think I have anxiety and maybe depression, I just don't want to label myself with such things. I know depersonalization is an anxiety-based disorder. It can also be triggered by trauma. I've heard people having this for years. I don't know if I can really last that long. I talked to my mom just a few nights ago and I am seeing a therapist this Wednesday. Even as I type this, I can't really tell if what I'm typing is a figment of my imagination or not. I have lost motivation for school. All I do is sit at home on my computer.

I'm scared. I'm really scared and I don't know how much longer I can go like this. It's all I think about. Videos and articles I've seen say try not to worry or think about it, but that's literally what having anxiety is about. You can't stop worrying. I don't want this to ruin my life. 

Depersonalization is one of the hardest things I've ever had to explain. I know what I see is real. I just don't feel like I'm there. I feel like a lose so many things, then when I look, I just can't focus. I feel like I'm searching for the item, but my eyes are closed. I barely talk to anyone, and I don't like my friends. But it's not like I can just get new ones. I'm shaking while typing this. I've lost emotion except for sadness. I'm so scared. Please give me advice. It was better in mid-December but has gotten worse.

Please help.",0.8502678571428568,2.9391346815476207,3.3254285714285707,88.31957142857145,83.13690476190476,6.578095238095237,19.719047619047625,7.760100539840176,0.6713104761904761,1247,34,277,23,35,432,157,336,0.132,0.727,0.142,0.6434,1,0,1,0,1,0,43.0,0,1,0,5,18,19,0,4,9,0,33,2,1,3,3,54,68,24,0,5,21,2,4,6,1,0,1,2,1,0,21,8,0,1,15,1,0,2,14,11,0,2,9,11,39,8,26,58,5,25,0,6,5,0,15,5,0,7,23,172,60,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931223402727831,0.08101805601830246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309026524655546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13983713421944227,0.0,0.0,0.06390701010713062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083334900270017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872022858256676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474904846937463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280948839023317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073390690163956,0.0826739518337393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13863943074310872,0.19588241973135334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706132088696965,0.0,0.04775123690624352,0.08767647137459761,0.051943104754242735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252316181392425,0.0,0.09167879027246838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20091792647917306,0.14900174645521844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455650769439462,0.2679121755650765,0.0,0.0,0.08088359878595247,0.07675058432242061,0.1022500287445566,0.19954156460198447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09266236146960337,0.09182071853625136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704323366081568,0.0,0.0,0.06718741916227326,0.0,0.0,0.08827193387666044,0.0,0.08577003082580463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590593087422193,0.0,0.1238661440485204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148571535869952,0.0,0.0,0.06336327359238546,0.0,0.0,0.20065324219834665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298375612670384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20805992479938454,0.2342054102997097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268267951985412,0.27451346481678546,0.0924987919862901,0.14566338548537835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036198883976931,0.0,0.0,0.06469137089832584,0.0,0.0,0.07641210718830305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692312901356314,0.15977026952867499,0.0,0.0,0.10611913182785912,0.18216060936469428,0.234254404766184,0.0,0.0725591253705159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205266318670034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781681036004197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185636478124516,0.09314150082954777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17657029782919395
mentalhealth,Throaway_10,2020/01/17,"I need help pls Hi I am using a throwaway I honestly don’t know why but I am 

So today around 6 hours ago I lost my iPod I know a huge deal and my mom just kind made me feel like a useless R***** and 5 minuets ago I tried to slit my wrist it has been a year since the last time I did but I caught my self and cleaned myself up I just need to vent 

TL:DR feel like a R***** need to boost self esteem",-4.2760869565217385,-4.279842521739129,-1.0756521739130402,109.89891304347827,131.82608695652175,2.0347826086956524,9.434782608695652,4.3202899421422565,-2.276634782608696,296,5,84,1,23,101,61,92,0.07200000000000001,0.6829999999999999,0.245,0.9319,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,6,0,6,1,1,2,0,17,17,6,0,3,4,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,4,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,5,2,16,4,5,12,0,11,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,0,9,42,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209545295439883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16116019475768262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866399037273223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830742242624232,0.2586639446422166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213444437291435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828374184154802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885208697705408,0.1989850217941201,0.14756829460325427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17688984096781754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19762190102670887,0.0,0.0,0.17130039907483405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21202687640834708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4027071328180333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3777195286955133,0.0,0.0,0.14975463894366484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556339869547092,0.0,0.17160071820040895,0.0,0.0,0.12291138728100195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15635675789773096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16335660145318487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658108421824825
mentalhealth,AtticusSeius,2020/01/17,"99 problems, and having too much fun ain't one I have been crying, or as I say leaking sadness. When I'm hanging with friends or doing stuff, laying in bed etc... Sometimes tears will escape me, and slowly fall down my face. When I try to sleep, it usually happens without problem, my family situation is terrible and I got lots of stress. I have been talking to my friend about it, but I feel bad for bringing the mood down all the time. I would love to be able to sleep and start the next day, but the tears agitate me and keep from falling asleep, along with some thoughts that also keep me up. I could go on and on, but if I make it too long I doubt people will have the time to read it.",5.220372340425532,4.788856950354613,5.594388297872342,86.34562500000001,68.14893617021275,8.468439716312059,29.68173758865248,7.645422480735847,1.6084248226950355,534,17,117,5,8,171,95,141,0.17600000000000002,0.727,0.098,-0.8741,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,6,12,0,2,5,0,14,5,4,1,1,29,26,16,0,5,7,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,6,9,0,2,2,1,0,5,2,7,0,1,4,2,16,4,20,17,5,20,0,1,0,1,5,6,0,6,9,84,22,1,0.15798526393222867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634075848809953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13191109633452794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261383778719578,0.0,0.17353939401307195,0.10188742544149784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17619533080292507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893444650688284,0.0,0.0798820963701828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441180460292964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978666626452159,0.0,0.1263552477951242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970584714092327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2808491231347281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398119870736952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134313421788679,0.14258786885535854,0.0,0.10545639045044217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613734700763748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16801912049566733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705490353124536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109527089810749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3023411224144001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802801698834332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563622294309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758205598290233,0.3161987180008564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625146570171278,0.0,0.11182278295692236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809715860578792,0.0,0.18085532955916614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698257077328956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542265243696193,0.18424495576544084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726162378489602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739984482313814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229215671337787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222819867879208,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fireflyxxi,2020/01/17,"How do you deal with your mental health and your s/o? It feels like it's hard to be fully committed when part of you is locked somewhere else. Also, how much do you share? How do you shake the feeling of not being """"normal"""" around someone who is?",1.4680000000000002,3.583901800000003,2.47,95.165,81.0,4.800000000000002,18.0,5.6839178017228535,-0.4597999999999995,190,4,41,1,5,60,39,50,0.057,0.774,0.168,0.7213,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,6,0,0,6,3,0,1,1,0,7,1,0,3,1,11,9,6,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,6,2,5,7,2,3,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,0,2,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378615677367581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26478344445440105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066461706370106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24847181178532915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007878202425109,0.2124902191931102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664465927014463,0.0,0.0,0.3161633585375638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14531349211532638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997481842402041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21865161933966548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291426708614282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32209705488158863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520187889274394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,capresesalad1985,2020/01/17,"I’m just tired Last year I was forced out of my career by an extremely toxic and narcissistic boss.  I was under her for a year and went from receiving the highest rating to being fired in 6 months.  I had no recourse.  I was luckily able to collect unemployment because they categorized my firing as a “lay off” since I didn’t technically do anything wrong.  But that black mark has stopped me from getting another job in my field.

Thankfully after 6 months unemployed I started a new job this week but it’s hard to get out of my head all of the things that happened under my previous boss.  It’s been a difficult week to say the least.  On top of this my bf has been going through his own stuff and has been emotionally checked out for two weeks.  I’m trying to support him but I’m running out of steam.  I really just needed a hug or a “good job at getting back out there” or something.  But nothing.

I take depression medication and I’m not suicidal, but I am just tired.  My new job doesn’t start health insurance for 60 days but as soon as that starts I know I need to get my butt to a therapist.  But for right now I just need a way to hold my head above water.",3.760573216520648,4.877665582978725,5.065857321652069,83.36411764705883,71.8936170212766,8.763454317897374,28.291614518147693,9.168548406835145,2.2195281602002512,912,34,191,19,17,304,138,235,0.1,0.7859999999999999,0.114,0.8547,8,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,8,7,0,0,12,0,15,9,3,2,1,33,36,16,1,3,14,0,3,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,9,9,1,2,2,0,1,4,4,3,0,1,9,5,26,4,37,26,3,38,0,1,1,2,7,14,1,2,19,126,35,9,0.11148510388982286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690185199375665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174274135485026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572516332649796,0.0,0.06796028456391287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189866907640599,0.0,0.09602195661958143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540573639130104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23298546161783346,0.0,0.06335955371581367,0.09350841576785553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858590918456067,0.0,0.09986875517922716,0.0,0.2288317600884183,0.11850345215639453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44252705270766346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06126929751050004,0.09087523938880784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230951334120837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17797269258984774,0.0,0.0,0.2479943757350448,0.0,0.2153460160888897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069729639521642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142021229105759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520766957765008,0.0,0.08865742929760696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222162999293693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582667964376361,0.0,0.0,0.2367291910316918,0.0,0.0,0.09320653882439224,0.0,0.0,0.12762377137643055,0.1219466088909007,0.12651197473591805,0.0,0.0,0.08382292363277832,0.0,0.0,0.10264050516566127,0.0,0.12944279832971595,0.07406574923694098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562714536000979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756910674667728,0.0,0.1089047470811824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849168626329637,0.2682798769878423,0.0,0.0,0.10334780822732673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189145987871322,0.0,0.14358550344467347
mentalhealth,sea-air-uhh,2020/01/17,"Does anyone else feel like movies about mental health struggles make you feel worse? For some reason movies and shows detailing struggles with mental health issues are always attractive to me. Like I can’t keep away because they are interesting. But at the same time I find myself wallowing in my own issues as I watch them. Like I am watching Spinning Out and while I can acknowledge the extremes the character experiences with BPD, I feel like my own emotions become more extreme just by watching it. Likewise, I watched Undone and felt myself getting just as stuck in the confusion and felt like I myself was losing touch with reality. 

I’m not sure if it’s just good cinematography or if this is something other people who have mental health issues experience. None of my family or my partner really understand that level of emotion or relation that comes with watching these films and when I try to explain it they just say I’m too emotional. And that feeds the feeling of isolation that comes with a mental health condition. 

So like does anyone else react similarly? Or am I really just too emotional?",6.066589195979901,8.383063180904525,6.2194189698492455,72.6250078517588,67.94472361809045,9.196105527638194,30.527952261306528,9.673873057562805,3.2923389447236167,899,36,140,21,16,286,120,199,0.092,0.772,0.135,0.8008,0,1,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,3,1,10,14,0,3,6,0,9,5,0,3,1,45,25,18,0,2,13,0,7,6,1,0,4,1,0,1,11,14,1,1,11,2,0,2,3,4,0,0,4,13,22,10,20,21,6,11,0,1,5,0,8,6,0,8,9,98,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468614682449658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255222661287326,0.1839360961910316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433093491452412,0.0,0.0,0.05471586381730598,0.09913105787456099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11304751366037875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546377606720009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709629333255534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14996318630921954,0.40386430035279625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17560180086260604,0.08461619455200713,0.0,0.18153809722908384,0.12824678220350458,0.17236420528621646,0.0,0.08203751593218456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046895039033072176,0.0,0.0,0.07528505473096317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3816357622206281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810532270905777,0.0,0.07978135548994877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26310840817019393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041664676714962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05991440301686461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618212663728652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06222714595251942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500300902494028,0.09228654444090813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137945138058141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910037156868164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18766985529482375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459619308667489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05233882217286116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060940035290811774,0.0,0.0,0.09344161939984973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147143822842972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-iwanttofeelalive,2020/01/17,"I hate myself to start off, i really just need to vent right now so i decided to vent here. my teeth are super crooked and weird looking. not only is my entire face fucking ugly, but my teeth are the worse and are my biggest insecurity. someone brought it up (who's opinion really matters to me) and im currently having a mental breakdown because I hate myself. i hate the way i look. I'm so ugly and I can't do anything to fix it, especially my teeth. I'm going to be this ugly forever. I'll never be able to have a good relationship for have an actual love because of how fucking disgusting I look. i can't stand myself. i feel like I'm going to throw up just thinking about how I look. I'll never even be able to have a good successful life, and I know I'm always the ugliest person at any given place.",1.6134206586826352,3.6163777485029978,4.3081699101796405,82.76548839820359,79.89820359281438,6.809730538922158,24.20995508982036,7.865858978985527,1.4833835329341318,632,23,125,11,16,224,94,167,0.22699999999999998,0.639,0.134,-0.9637,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,10,14,6,1,7,0,14,8,4,2,2,20,37,10,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,4,5,8,0,0,2,5,21,6,16,32,0,18,0,0,4,3,4,7,2,1,6,80,25,1,0.2740163558794517,0.0,0.13370021800190224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400177954215115,0.0,0.0,0.09317025920962588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274605659107255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16703782721625038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049260937428837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692754514014625,0.09787866969566852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533237055698194,0.0,0.0,0.15572980975569164,0.22983191869373554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4058016324743681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479923428962784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529611152227568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677292789201974,0.06693527519096902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4602094523120495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365522974700688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380720186958827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158982791798764,0.21133830622673813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10420089314810996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963025632519088,0.14314438524281475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554189416617605,0.0,0.0,0.14709550922802814,0.0,0.11700423536055987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160865845599874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09697509352295976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778930827602023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875071444280077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962303825668318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cynicsjoy,2020/01/17,"I think I’m depressed I’m 17 and have been feeling depressed for 5 years. I’ve been refraining from self-diagnosing because of how dangerous it is, but I’m almost certain I have depression.

I often feel empty, apathetic, angry at myself, hopeless, or depressed.

I think about how much better life would be if I was dead

I hit or scratch myself when I’m upset

I have trouble focusing on anything, plus a lack of motivation to do things I know I’m supposed to do, or things I enjoyed doing.

The thing is though, I can still laugh and have fun with my friends, and I feel happy sometimes. Am I normal and my hormones are just acting up because I’m a teen? Or am I actually depressed?

I’d like to see a therapist or at least a counsellor but I’m scared to because my parents have done so much for me and I don’t want them upset or blaming themselves.",2.6968421052631544,4.607448157894737,4.520327485380118,82.9587368421053,76.19298245614034,6.899181286549709,29.52865497076024,7.793537801064563,2.0471033918128656,669,31,129,10,15,227,101,171,0.28800000000000003,0.532,0.18,-0.975,1,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,1,2,9,19,1,3,5,0,21,1,0,3,1,34,37,20,1,5,10,1,4,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,7,0,0,1,1,11,0,0,4,5,21,8,16,30,4,8,0,6,1,0,3,4,0,9,4,93,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.13753440449937754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14112827592326566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597933036044608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577420789403281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464752539607896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6069451416087475,0.14304832014206456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422771703533974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21378629213880912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888775306823063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003030037137435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745541491329179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954813244284144,0.0688548107921627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20721015866970224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808856004571046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15649411336514313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110275234780836,0.0,0.11230872384714033,0.0,0.1470282665106029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13939052266406712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255265267313012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636389849328285,0.2808972962532145,0.18061377035275936,0.13847011134633708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312842888044042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011776338372047,0.0,0.0,0.09075895429464592
mentalhealth,artsyamb,2020/01/17,"Therapist, counselor, psychiatrist, psychologist? What’s the difference? How do I know which one to see? Where do I start?  How do I find someone? How much does it cost? Does insurance help? How often do you go? So many questions...",1.2960704607046092,3.2315852195121937,2.5915447154471565,84.59647696476966,111.43902439024393,6.7002710027100285,24.067750677506773,7.3871296695380915,2.2249815718157184,178,8,32,5,9,57,32,41,0.0,0.9079999999999999,0.092,0.5661,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,4,0,8,8,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,1,8,1,3,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,2,1,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949346872886189,0.0,0.0,0.4940706433761846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580094502407896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043284779874567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18921413981813268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551401060418894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28619942155288597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075168406557576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912881250511947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3162312489260555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22494989338808166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391847955302341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998074799403589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3277623585579632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway-a-b-c,2020/01/17,"I'm having some problems with my mom because of mental health... So, I've been going to a psychologist the last few months, and he suspects that I have aspd, but the problem is that my mom thinks that I'm being used by the devil or something like this, I don't want to talk about what I've been talking to the psychologist since there's a lot of things that she's included, and she's really authoritarian, vengeful, and aggressive, I also have problems to sleep at night and she says that I have to sleep sooner so I can wake up sooner, but I can't, the psychologist said for her to get a psychiatrist to get me medications and she is really angry because of that (I dunno why though), she doesn't respect the fact that i hate social interactions and obliges me to interact whenever she's able to, I'm a atheist but I cannot say that for her because she would get mad at me since my whole family is really religious, i don't usually like asking for help but, I really don't know what to do
(English is not my fist language)",5.6481884057971,5.5205090483091785,7.041847826086958,75.30016304347829,67.21256038647343,10.378260869565215,30.77657004830918,10.125756701596842,2.8870743961352656,811,28,162,18,12,279,105,207,0.177,0.775,0.047,-0.9808,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,6,10,3,0,10,0,20,5,3,1,1,26,34,15,0,5,6,2,0,2,0,1,2,3,0,0,12,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,7,7,0,0,3,3,27,3,22,29,4,8,1,0,0,0,22,3,0,4,6,112,39,0,0.12947930004144145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354454946355804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104566711803436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367881385655476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206156071646634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029427706318644,0.0,0.07358607006519154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278340026086392,0.0,0.1376304412190182,0.0,0.0,0.08678724551127066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711584371265457,0.1055429109057447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651409149635864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100786706716471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043677287851602,0.13048468058539225,0.0,0.0,0.3032891826330834,0.10334914198850073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150755192056115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3716826107346939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33179102045404146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316446480077453,0.20593427262304667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21421322999289616,0.0,0.2591456168868677,0.13198784067950667,0.0,0.09967949095816374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20814111356919124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602029359654642,0.08296510732156494,0.12721275488840256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182854293111408,0.14260315629792314,0.0,0.07637024585742999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683492907058725,0.14455901452389106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919783798068364,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StrangeInvite,2020/01/17,"Depression Help/ Advice My entire life I've felt unhappy/ unfulfilled. I've never endured any severe emotional trauma and outsiders would say my life seems pretty good. No matter where I am/ who I'm dating/how great my friends are/ what I've achieved I've felt a pit inside of me. At 16 I was diagnosed with depression and since then I've been in and out of therapy. I guess I can be described as nihilistic; I've always asked myself questions like ""Ok, but even if I do x or y, why does it matter in the long run?"" and had thoughts such as ""No matter what, one day nothing will matter. People work so hard for things but in the end we all die and nobody is remembered."" I guess I am asking for advice or a new perspective on things, if anyone has any insight.",2.9772722672064766,4.839959875000002,4.263421052631582,85.3212550607288,75.25,7.3085020242914975,24.19230769230769,8.139509932561175,1.4571906882591092,599,19,117,10,13,197,106,152,0.134,0.75,0.11599999999999999,-0.8297,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,0,2,4,8,0,0,4,1,13,3,0,0,2,30,22,15,1,3,6,0,3,1,1,2,3,1,0,0,6,8,0,0,7,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,6,4,13,5,13,13,1,14,0,2,0,0,8,7,0,8,7,70,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754248729808219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172627263826153,0.0,0.0,0.19167066788911188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853958045638277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26349583114852565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088639045256734,0.0,0.2427607952540143,0.14303814948330226,0.1462601922218023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332634928982815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15852414055869835,0.12481967675240555,0.0,0.0,0.09308109167526274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706244397656509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888001120744713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820305570673223,0.0,0.1553727441822063,0.31049441546299666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624309731777325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944605368103934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19908210924814027,0.06884991525208213,0.0,0.0,0.12471614423533865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086917505882809,0.13610837552403568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352234567693169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549592327062396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097701181539707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337363463920938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15787072550966785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596430543878603,0.0,0.0,0.11207097209407724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829483717981827,0.0,0.1592076315467018,0.0,0.1165764426432306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16116254411566036,0.0,0.187251549737506,0.0,0.0,0.111880461318827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12716488526852346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259668575689784,0.0,0.0,0.1001106450644951,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,serious-convo,2020/01/17,"Did I have a panic attack? I’ve never experienced anything like this before. Today at school we had finals and like everyone else I was also stressed. Long story short I got to my math class and took the final, I ended up not finishing it and after got really upset and started breathing heavily/hyperventilating? and wasn’t able to stop right away. Not many people saw and I’m quite emotional about it even after a few hours. Is this what a panic attack is??",4.445032467532466,6.3004972045454535,6.074220779220783,73.90454545454547,71.27272727272727,8.21038961038961,23.935064935064936,8.841846274778883,1.9361474025974024,366,10,62,7,7,125,65,88,0.27,0.71,0.02,-0.9705,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,1,3,8,2,4,4,0,7,1,1,0,1,11,13,7,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,8,2,6,2,8,5,1,18,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,14,42,11,3,0.1605117237639314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283611675027274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208747217250252,0.0,0.0,0.3652105160125591,0.15080604819905633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13658365467603353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408694879023114,0.1805540849470423,0.14216574485115285,0.0,0.0,0.10601647972395616,0.0,0.0,0.1533758306352424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516654952646253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567517770380696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807171528291772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683584094143818,0.0,0.0,0.14204782452169765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16273369458538905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379653660063562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37665184730818174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112786189470921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072397600155353,0.0,0.0,0.10282792038076101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13707613507323885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16244643376104967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361102422941892,0.0,0.0,0.13419498830586565,0.18386563725907792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214634598497004,0.0,0.17833443109397373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bobbobbby56666,2020/01/17,"Psychologist/psychiatrist/therapist Have some self confidence issues and think I should talk to someone. Not really sure which one I should go to?

Also, any online platforms you’d recommend or should I see someone locally/in person?",8.136923076923079,10.719444743589744,8.23897435897436,59.14769230769232,63.10256410256411,12.37948717948718,36.07692307692308,11.855464076750405,5.6686,191,9,25,7,3,62,33,39,0.057999999999999996,0.777,0.165,0.61,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,9,8,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,4,1,2,4,1,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,2,0,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23052433314577805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960291639098807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16382687276617053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008723526376885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953349065009018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517006963884141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18466907270875688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297088038297667,0.0,0.300721850203578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4884897027333143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716850744073879,0.0,0.0,0.2316953990062235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.334696310324021,0.0,0.18470770444950144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mah_ias,2020/01/17,"I really need advice/help My best friend is suicidal, but refuses to get help. Especially when he drinks, he starts talking about killing himself and starts to apologize about being a “burden”. I lost count of the times I woke up and thought he actually did it because of the messages he has left me. I really don’t know what to do and I was hoping someone in here could give me some insight because I’m really scared.",4.625185185185185,6.107675654320989,5.69969135802469,78.24361111111115,70.23456790123457,9.350617283950617,30.78395061728395,9.725611199111238,3.0320765432098766,332,14,62,8,6,110,59,81,0.209,0.649,0.142,-0.8552,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,4,7,1,1,3,0,8,1,0,0,0,12,19,5,2,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,1,3,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,5,0,9,3,9,12,2,7,0,1,0,0,12,3,0,2,4,39,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.1975990340139662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24686955485183476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124986153686824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16167015479571462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198361107099862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15644169108487352,0.0,0.10579159866240004,0.1942448965250587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714468148106167,0.0,0.0,0.20111622712429514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240229201830416,0.0,0.11128208408454393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22000375465808314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22103952155509912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15014225228827827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3891569052908137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027257664155228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17156738645488034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866440322973632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22148895671762128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275214744012845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16075281747285428,0.1180723544311189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Obese_but_cute,2020/01/17,"I think I may be mentally disturbed? I experienced traumatic experiences as a child and I'm afraid I may be mentally disturbed.

I have a few life experiences I'd like to share.

One of my younger memories of my mother was when I (6 at the time) and my brother (3 at the time) watched as my mother was screaming at my father on the phone as she tried to pull off the locks on our ammunition cabinet. I'm not sure if she was trying to shoot herself or my father. I made my brother go up to her and tell her she was being crazy. She just turned to him and yelled ""Oh yeah? Well you have a crazy mama.""

I used to have big anxiety as a kid, and still a tiny bit now, of when my parents would drive me places and I wouldn't recognize the roads that they were taking me somewhere to kill me, abandon me or drive the car into water to kill us.

I used to be hypersexual as a young child (5-10) because of the stuff I saw on TV. I would often get in trouble at school because I was write or draw sexual things in books.

My father used to beat me and my brother with his belt when we misbehaved. I think he wanted to and liked hurting us. He would say he waited for use to act up so he could hit of on the ass 5, 10 times with his belt.

My father also attempted to murder me (11 or 12 at the time) at a house party we were having when somebody ate his plate of food he has hiding in the microwave. He said he was going to shoot every last motherfucker there until he found out who did it. His friends had to drag him away from the ammo cabinet and gun safe. I grabbed my younger cousin and hid I my mom's car with a pair of scissors while it happened.

In 2nd grade I tried to commit suicide. I've been morbidly obese my entire life and was dehumanized at school daily. I wrote a suicide note that my parents accidentally found. I tried so, so hard to hit my head as hard as possible on the cinderblock walls of my school with the intention of dying, not knowing that that wouldn't kill me. I used to jump off the top of my playground equipment too, and fall without catching myself, just like how it felt when I would collapse on the floor and hit my head. I did it over and over again. I was 9.

Jump to 7th-9th grade. I began cutting my wrists. I became addicted. I then later had sexual responses from it. I now have very scary and violent, dangerous fetishes and sexual intrests.

In 10th grade I tried to kill myself again.

I was incredibly depressed my Jr year, too. But no suicide attempt. I would cry myself to sleep, almost manic, nearly screaming because I was terrified that I was insane because of the thoughts on my brain.

That's all I will like to share, if you would like to know more, ask.

Now, present day I'm scared I may be mentally disturbed as I take pleasure in violent porn and have murderous fantasies that I take sexual pleasure in.

I feel like a creep when I think about people. I feel something wrong in me, like if my brain were a clock it would be ticking differently than other people. It's hard for me to feel love for other people or animals. I struggle with food addiction too but have stopped cutting for a long time. 

A week ago my doctor suggested to my mother that I see a therapist because I seemed depressed (just diagnosed with an autoimmune disease). When I was first diagnosed I thought about killing myself more than I already do. It was all I could think about.

I want to cry, and I want to feel normal but nothing inside of me feels normal.",4.047779180737042,5.0657557741007215,5.052424019967699,84.10188078108942,71.11510791366906,8.090735574805462,28.42827778593452,8.418075326091056,1.906797973865805,2713,99,554,42,49,890,302,695,0.172,0.774,0.054000000000000006,-0.997,3,0,1,3,0,8,75.0,5,2,1,5,30,42,12,6,31,1,51,21,7,8,4,101,100,52,11,19,17,14,10,7,1,13,8,5,0,3,21,28,5,4,17,3,0,12,6,26,1,2,32,19,108,16,98,44,6,84,0,4,3,3,59,38,1,14,41,377,129,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12891698135173282,0.0,0.0,0.052413602057928936,0.0,0.059208374236618726,0.0,0.06524946434867693,0.04728481853571015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04523292872050212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527690674075151,0.0,0.05555291184951572,0.0,0.0,0.1802200795291668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455270539279168,0.0,0.0,0.13201330339323816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441814944662012,0.0,0.12989915294007265,0.03813281225097063,0.0,0.10185410358164523,0.12002780332264718,0.061365760286141,0.06177640818858554,0.0,0.060520241673101036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049818078020023165,0.0,0.0,0.11567749573539295,0.0,0.0,0.1494850306550911,0.042241214294354366,0.056772366581624815,0.0,0.0,0.050294436240957405,0.1429961638033231,0.12966208910202026,0.045682318382134365,0.0,0.030892056067259095,0.0,0.06720786343298983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228689228629616,0.0,0.1589018214067608,0.0,0.12136523049178807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822603058438695,0.06329798559370807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3270830906303949,0.0,0.06499065000031982,0.048197393448171484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352802500665392,0.2022094413817825,0.0,0.0,0.052326616659654136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053365529738008816,0.05594855422186669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17876202490045653,0.0,0.0,0.06925026010034661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586620877346625,0.0567351246235563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04006681412562287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313097884790886,0.0,0.0,0.12297619458094802,0.0,0.06177640818858554,0.0,0.0,0.06665818720447067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05624448025825001,0.04702113612793935,0.059197666181144776,0.17952275501080844,0.04711753833933383,0.053828113478662856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05917092465177421,0.0,0.0,0.04551979477536442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0472198752319361,0.049433841978024834,0.0,0.06181365674750236,0.06768766898155629,0.1940300370457863,0.0,0.05572765038253198,0.0,0.13337119519497914,0.0,0.05168067304572364,0.0,0.0,0.06865242415964412,0.03928216399775563,0.15154791110956894,0.0,0.09388240868140446,0.17239071151194302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20072091054416752,0.06431452747980453,0.0,0.0,0.14224794390070147,0.25533900079750754,0.0,0.04878697634739722,0.10462607357716323,0.0,0.047429093896111316,0.0,0.0531633734518172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569974969343112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940209518159031,0.06464742969876451,0.0,0.038076636988914656
mentalhealth,Akamatsu_Kaede,2020/01/17,"2 years since my attempt As of today, it has officially been 2 whole years since my major suicide attempt! I haven't attempted since then and I'm proud of how far I've come.

Of course, there have been many relapses. I haven't been completely free of self-harm and the like, but I'm continuing with my life and overall happy to be alive.

The journey is hard but it gets better! Hoping that life with continue on an upturn for me and all of you reading :)",3.5476923076923086,4.990359153846157,4.651428571428571,84.86857142857146,72.84615384615384,7.837362637362638,26.186813186813183,8.418075326091056,1.6615670329670331,357,12,73,6,7,117,62,91,0.061,0.701,0.237,0.9642,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,1,0,5,2,6,0,0,3,0,9,2,0,1,1,12,14,9,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,3,1,7,7,11,10,3,10,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,7,44,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871669557970786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822979918750566,0.22188696846367092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056641544058952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252809633292149,0.18957629713039156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21019344259112735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989569322841469,0.1033903022703596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21455664434557614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21168435068370897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207732000412161,0.0,0.0,0.5251803258591091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23148567857541144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20059772825256755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23627407873312795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725618038974632
mentalhealth,tatile,2020/01/17,Not doing great. I was doing fantastic and now I’m not. That’s all.,-2.6020000000000003,-1.3347765333333328,1.3066666666666684,94.60000000000002,114.33333333333334,4.666666666666667,11.666666666666668,6.42735559955562,-0.5003333333333333,52,1,12,1,3,19,12,15,0.195,0.5920000000000001,0.213,0.0788,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,10,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatisquitetragic,2020/01/17,hi first post here and i think i may have psychosis So im a 15 year old boy who is in highschool and i dont know how i feel about this. So i have smoked weed quite alot and i took edibles and it was scary i thought it was the weed so i heard this intense music in my ears that weren't playing and everything felt hot when it wasn't and i was walking and i thought my friends weren't real and they seemed weird to me like when i normally talk to them they look at me even when walking but this time they weren't and i was really scared. This type of thing happened to me twice while under the influence of weed. But today was different i walked with my friends to class but they would always talk to eachother but they didn't and they didn't look real to me but i knew they were because i was sober but they looked like what a character in a 3d film looks like. They sorta look real but you know they are not. I was sober and i was with my friend and it happened again and i was trying my best to stay calm i am really worried about me having early stages of psychosis because it happened so randomly and the last time this thing happened was in november of 2019 and im wondering if i should seek medical help but im scared that my mom is going to get mad. Any help is appreciated,0.4774166666666666,2.7746624962963007,1.9043287037037049,96.43760416666667,87.0,5.300925925925927,19.54861111111111,6.770275591412753,0.12297222222222225,1014,30,230,13,32,325,128,270,0.075,0.7809999999999999,0.145,0.9663,1,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,11,3,13,13,1,2,7,0,29,2,1,2,0,49,52,33,0,4,10,1,3,3,3,3,1,2,0,1,16,17,0,0,10,2,0,5,8,4,0,2,23,10,43,9,22,26,2,27,0,0,5,0,24,6,0,7,16,157,59,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242281632539954,0.0,0.0,0.06736171305979907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076766000787148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395352536845133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349280002702424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609330149012485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542578327477183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902545790703427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05008586558607805,0.0,0.09510962767140343,0.0,0.0,0.08425727854665199,0.0,0.0,0.2295920649834725,0.0,0.05175285314796268,0.0,0.05629600501603092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3503808036816265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279076336870774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32099356023461245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887755603363487,0.08074414405460806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518178351897004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159119194396417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997888488098146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160135969463634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970541888569804,0.0,0.0,0.10394297358825688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948685991633306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535861861069698,0.0,0.33824342881191904,0.1269160653314345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983453686542998,0.0,0.0,0.09017717843149947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558088652611844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159235479801444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316172714618803,0.0634713077324631,0.0,0.15727935036396656,0.11552110558812625,0.0,0.093893835037533,0.0,0.11005524678393518,0.06725275769602941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074223833596589,0.0,0.10059652915532026,0.0,0.07036678717024485,0.0,0.0,0.06378904007441884
mentalhealth,ninjasquirtle1014,2020/01/17,"I’m a depressed loner (I’m a guy). Only one person talks to me (a girl). She got a boyfriend, and now I’m afraid she’ll want nothing to do with me. This girl in my class started talking to me a few weeks ago. We’ve sort of become friends, but never hung out outside of school. She handcrafted me a stuffed animal that she took hours to make after knowing me for only two weeks. I thought she had a crush on me, so I didn’t know what to do. I’m clueless in romance. I started becoming more friendly with her and now we talk every day. I just found out that she has a boyfriend. They seem to have nothing in common. He’s a popular guy who is not very nice, and she’s an artsy theater girl who is very nice. Her boyfriend doesn’t seem to show much interest in her interests, but I do. I never wanted a relationship with her to begin with, but I wanted to be her close friend because I am a shy depressed loner who absolutely no one who talks to except for her. I don’t know why I’m so sad that she found someone. I was gonna ask her to prom, but now that’s out of the question. I want what’s best for her because I care about her very much, but now I’m more depressed than ever because I was just about to build up the courage to ask her to hang out this weekend, until I saw her with this guy. I think I’m upset because now that she has a boyfriend, she won’t want to be friends with another boy. I’m not even straight, but at the same time I felt like I was falling in love with this girl because I care so much about her, despite not wanting romance. Should I just back off and stay a loner? We’ve become really friendly and seeing her has been the highlight of my dark days ever since my grandma died. I need some advice. It hurts so much worse than it should, and right now with everything I’m going through, I could not have found out at a worse time.",3.7844757033248086,4.022272327365734,4.663564194373403,89.48367365728903,71.25063938618925,7.381319693094629,28.171969309462924,6.918507183188421,1.1833839590792836,1444,49,326,11,25,469,171,391,0.153,0.677,0.17,0.8803,0,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,1,0,1,1,20,25,0,2,19,0,26,1,0,1,4,65,68,17,1,10,14,0,1,1,5,5,0,0,0,9,17,21,0,0,12,2,0,4,11,7,0,3,14,3,55,18,54,46,10,49,0,5,2,1,53,18,0,5,27,219,72,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610305099355755,0.06903557296166839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166355879299107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456138398646543,0.0,0.0,0.05988461085908296,0.0,0.2373734290526853,0.25803572300575256,0.0,0.0,0.08172984316237067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15880690026893007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218052937693301,0.0,0.0,0.10045180789047664,0.0,0.20123277517211652,0.0,0.08082673686307483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05143874617883022,0.1408931271458358,0.0656169281431999,0.0,0.0699931694130725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477663624454989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561729091621574,0.30084795739114073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04426077561410542,0.0,0.06228743646465624,0.0,0.0,0.231339166581726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669572562361722,0.0,0.08337173045179057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840178647609107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03804804231821261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028938628935677,0.0,0.051985242675669584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290018894867331,0.057746742068299425,0.12013110868421753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945516742428727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554647501058773,0.11846190161416564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800146921355459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724298385853302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04989167071322511,0.0,0.0,0.08361355270385384,0.0,0.0665087591812774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881832046912046,0.06205996398042288,0.14179733922267393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442281601591639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598713860985359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024717390485962,0.08300929926271215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503867135612612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049902107772663566,0.0,0.061827709028460215,0.0908244507167682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08652710936897996,0.0,0.0,0.0760770600672343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927764969189191,0.27561246136627543,0.0,0.12494064684018373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027423226844291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15873194673604485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,petri707,2020/01/17,"How can I get energy? I’ve been sleeping for most of my days about a month now, no matter how much I sleep I get. I try to make myself do things like go out with friends do things with my mom, get groceries things like that but even going to the theripist or psychologist has seemingly been taking all the energy I have for the day. I want to do thing like clean my room and be productive but my lack of energy has been making it really hard, like I couldn’t even finish putting up my clothes after starting to the other day, how do I fix this?",5.860208333333333,5.031095080357146,6.334642857142858,82.8936904761905,66.94642857142857,9.966666666666667,27.595238095238088,9.2995712137729,1.898209523809525,427,10,93,7,6,139,71,112,0.055,0.732,0.213,0.9405,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,5,0,13,2,2,5,1,19,24,7,0,3,3,1,1,4,1,0,0,0,2,0,8,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,3,1,14,5,14,19,4,14,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,3,12,69,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319089162326314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266158450188803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325399998074912,0.0,0.2688852000214242,0.0,0.19499295399057587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367614228395962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33524492339995643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290234613515288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20091864391799769,0.1369304983326042,0.0,0.1261098407135991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724562974326404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990006520351728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15617373204267435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3433501021709227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142479323142677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289851216802561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558838686905639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647197597260145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118531825068224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Maddie-Is-Here,2020/01/17,"I'm slipping My mental health is at a serious low.
I find myself coming home wanting to cry.
I can't focus on school work.
I feel distant from my friends.
I'm dreading the thought of going to school tomorrow.
Everytime I do I find myself judging every interaction.
Hating the way I am.
The guy that I'm interested in has me far enough in the friendzone to confide in me about the girl he's asking out.
I won't burden him with the information that it's hurting me.
My head always hurts.
I came home from school today and tried to get drunk: numb.
I just want it to be better.
I don't want to be lonely anymore. 
I don't want to be sad.",0.15053475935828686,2.4826985454545496,2.6352049910873454,89.99927807486635,90.06060606060606,4.924064171122995,20.64349376114082,6.522977012572876,0.421592156862745,496,17,103,6,17,170,82,132,0.214,0.677,0.109,-0.9371,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,2,13,1,1,7,0,11,4,1,0,0,15,26,1,0,4,1,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,2,2,4,5,1,0,5,1,0,3,4,10,0,0,2,1,20,3,18,20,1,14,0,5,0,0,8,8,0,0,2,63,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12424190991255213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14808020117617482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395892212546305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320568438133941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17077640132839808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286215151495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640153426600221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15428214616658065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580419428735415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549807052783376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729421210561893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536027654324447,0.0,0.07801084220590118,0.0,0.08485906567454811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14784516883309845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14741749373483995,0.15324010523229858,0.15871469477680822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2995499218424775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31968925314334273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504742415175669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4533437749506001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11853930592397728,0.0,0.0,0.14153301129656168,0.0,0.0,0.10137497643921084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3522790497199068,0.1185191715514617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870298331239114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,123helpmeplzzzzz,2020/01/17,"I get super stressed and angry and my mom says im a spoiled brat because of it. I have a good life in terms of material wealth as a student that goes to a good public high school and i do well, but I get super super stressed out because of school. I get super mad and always yell and hit stuff because if i dont, the pressure builds up like crazy and i cant hold it in and i end up doing it anyways. I never hit other people im anger though, (unless they hit me first) 

Since I am always stressed and angry, my mom says that i am a spoiled brat because i have a good life but im always stressed or pissed, and it makes me even more stressed out. 
Can someone please help me? I dont know what to do.",1.6741832229580602,2.836231291390732,3.1492880794702,94.89602924944813,77.1456953642384,5.29823399558499,23.179359823399558,4.7782277997778095,-0.0188812362030899,539,16,127,1,12,177,75,151,0.213,0.5579999999999999,0.22899999999999998,0.2575,0,0,0,0,1,0,13.0,0,0,1,5,4,19,3,6,7,0,11,3,1,1,1,20,19,16,0,1,5,2,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,9,11,0,1,1,0,1,0,4,9,1,1,0,3,19,10,13,16,2,11,0,0,0,0,7,7,1,2,5,79,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559254925217319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499916426554416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24031562041458865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080617014091724,0.0,0.0,0.06771638629005924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720718555026127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069427158382174,0.0,0.0,0.25797775800140377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871993102675332,0.10832263681780743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322317721467771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634471819563326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14483200369328705,0.05008823353204055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684358199978227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24015063030199785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907312255271771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107749631063112,0.0,0.0,0.11254098212961533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16306300456168474,0.0,0.20752029285726348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480922688241188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686857476552406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.587206656480322,0.0,0.11736588675652042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072968314818806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218173061685364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bombadil443,2020/01/17,Whats happening to me I dont know how to express the hell im living in i feel anxiety all the time an underlying layer of fear and disorientation nothing feels real i feel like im dying i feel ill i cant talk to anyone about this i dont want to live like this but the fear keeos getting worse there is no way to describe the fear i feel like i could be dropped in never ending torment at any second im losing my mind and have no anchor no one to talk to how do i make it stop i just want the fear to go away,-1.214057971014494,0.7916412173913052,1.8678260869565229,95.32637681159424,93.34782608695652,4.457971014492753,16.36231884057971,6.079149491110277,-0.5220028985507246,400,10,96,4,15,141,70,115,0.327,0.62,0.052000000000000005,-0.9867,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,1,4,6,0,8,1,0,3,2,22,20,5,1,3,2,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,6,0,0,1,7,6,0,2,0,5,12,3,15,18,1,12,1,1,0,0,3,5,1,1,7,59,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817340771642035,0.0,0.09194587111226556,0.0,0.0,0.08404041955349965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292350544861915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09596282227622684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473939772593776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817261744462325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645364993661187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5409936610000937,0.3038611858797522,0.17172910775392228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279489491171635,0.0,0.06830737831640267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628460272212356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3894810750750595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660538914620764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17615791757614754,0.0,0.2122619064360052,0.0,0.0,0.13446310976909762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022850004429898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135875970641186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269879452639576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11532661279594288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144460753884006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680379776098206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048515078873096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19321012489418735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008440350865221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178366289376804,0.09540210965745397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224850105557424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,metallicado,2020/01/17,"Best Site for Mental Health  [https://www.7cups.com/](https://www.7cups.com/forum/ProjectsEvents_184/SocialMediaSoldiers_1619/WanttobecomeasocialsoldierFindouthowhere_190705/)

The active listeners listen to your problems! Much better than giving advice. I highly recommend it for anyone struggling with mental illness.",30.01107142857143,39.820925107142855,16.639999999999993,-11.769999999999984,30.071428571428555,7.085714285714286,28.42857142857143,8.07648339933343,3.6296857142857135,285,6,13,3,4,70,26,28,0.193,0.447,0.36,0.7955,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,2,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,2,5,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699355175536051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19315127469886084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898936011839673,0.2443091043044643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26499162108684154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2936269245967362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29185946852052463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5567636800103763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20306591770081514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26432142228002314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887828023720525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flyingstegosaurus,2020/01/17,"Antidepressants compromising immune health Hi everyone, I'm new to this sub reddit and relatively new to antidepressants so bare with me.

I started taking flouroxitine back in September, and it has greatly reduced my depression and anxiety. But over the past 2 months, I've gotten sick more times than I have in the past 5 years. A friend recently told me it could be due to the new medicine and a little information online kind of supports that.

I was wondering if anyone else has noticed this for themselves? And if so what they did to counteract it. I really don't want to go off the medicine, but constantly being extremely sick has brought back my depression anyways.

TLDR: started taking antidepressants and now I get sick all of the time",6.429850746268656,8.406640044776122,6.719582089552244,70.75340298507466,66.46268656716418,10.733134328358213,34.295522388059695,10.793553405168565,4.283390447761194,602,28,98,18,10,194,90,134,0.155,0.8059999999999999,0.038,-0.9537,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,0,7,0,10,5,0,0,1,16,23,12,0,4,4,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,5,0,10,4,14,15,2,24,0,2,0,0,5,5,0,3,17,66,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857464761154718,0.0,0.0,0.10837966961578399,0.15881591330701667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383710093128323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750003675888195,0.0,0.12375496254007652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670027075763832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12948268931071427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14810923214446864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975268808506102,0.0,0.08098115169162418,0.0,0.08809012536567955,0.0,0.0,0.17088815076921215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16475785172895202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16140874578327905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535081411540158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237195961971739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4491001697870701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17646863428642073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29593025658726585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929702918334256,0.0,0.15304389341684374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21941972854619274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758922697709154,0.0,0.0,0.2330815612890369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18076360251037601,0.0,0.0,0.14810923214446864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142307132081884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16809099001852418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981497862080596
mentalhealth,shoegazethrow1117,2020/01/17,"I don't know where to go from here I've dealt with depression for pretty much as long as I can remember, but I've been able to shrug it off most of the time and live life fairly normally. About a year ago I went vegan and starting losing weight, finally escaping my lifetime obesity. I thought all my problems existed due to me being fat, and that if I could be skinny I would be successful in everything I tried. Obviously that was disillusion, but I never ever imagined that my confidence and social skills would seemingly shed off with the pounds.

I've always definitely been a quirky person, obsessed with niche music and not much else. I've always had a natural talent for music but as a person with very low self-worth, other musicians with their own fragile egos have often seen me as a target, and I've developed trust issues an a feeling of nihilism towards my passion. When I talk to people I feel like the only thing I have to talk about is music, and I end up getting frustrated in most conversations about the topic, a recipe for social failure.

After a toxic first serious relationship and an even more toxic rebound, I decided to give up on relationships. I didn't want to be hurt anymore, but moreso I didn't want to sacrifice my own personality to better suit someone else's romantic desires. Most relationships I see appear to be full of conflict and I have no interest. I came out as asexual even though I still have the desire to have sex simply because I am repulsed by how open people are about it. Before my first serious relationship got too toxic we had an okay sex life, but I still found it to be quite overrated, and I felt like the fantasies I had developed from watching porn were not nearly as satisfying in real life. I recently went NoFap and quit porn, which has helped me feel more attracted to people, but I don't feel like I have the social skills or energy to flirt and pursue. I want to find someone who's life isn't purely about sex and relationships, and don't expect their partner to change drastically for them, but I feel more and more like this doesn't even exist. Even if it does, how would even I be able to pull myself together socially to get together with that person in the first place?

I am planning to spend my final year at university abroad in order to reinvigorate my social skills, and find enjoyment in sex/relationships again, but as the application deadline gets closer I feel more and more like I'm just running away and I don't really have any business going. Additionally, Japan is where I am trying to go. I am learning the language but its a very slow and frustrating process, but regardless, if I can't even talk to people in English how the fuck am I supposed to be able to talk to people in Japanese?

I guess I'm just lost. I have no motivation besides to finish my degree. I'm so lonely and I just want someone to put their hands through my hair and tell me it will be okay. I don't want to feel ugly anymore, I don't want to feel like a bad musician anymore. I don't want to feel like I have to run away but I also don't see what's left for me where I'm currently at. I don't want to feel like everyone is more savvy and clever than me in conversations. I don't want to feel like the least entitled person to happiness but everyone I've ever cared about has led me to believe that. I want to make new friends that I won't drift away from or won't say terrible things to me. 

I really don't know where to go from here and any insight is appreciated. Thank you.",7.266149425287359,6.4247691781609175,7.971551724137932,72.34528735632183,64.11494252873564,11.411494252873563,33.8448275862069,10.746095033038511,3.5101051724137933,2812,101,534,64,36,945,300,696,0.12,0.7070000000000001,0.17300000000000001,0.9942,1,2,0,0,0,0,54.0,1,1,4,14,35,40,3,1,25,2,61,17,4,6,6,120,115,54,0,23,22,0,16,9,2,6,6,1,0,6,19,34,4,1,25,1,1,14,23,15,0,3,18,21,74,25,95,81,17,73,1,6,4,7,34,32,1,12,35,368,93,3,0.1506055190810264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044500901882763864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04014639306560715,0.08354390442133422,0.0,0.0,0.06827794497227059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149360206018184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414988428071497,0.0,0.04191643921197413,0.030602575520634806,0.0,0.0427180680391107,0.056560282165326825,0.0,0.04439944759982575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05741753068687204,0.05118412134492938,0.0,0.053106889869514534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04008208403452553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043238770966686366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043931968220163146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387439060939013,0.0,0.044463929273141946,0.0,0.0,0.19894704991707776,0.09082087622498508,0.0,0.09594001835976754,0.04511817648336546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792191440019382,0.2869136344637089,0.04820163880568478,0.1099873230757665,0.0917671439940202,0.12810497759345596,0.0,0.055043726041438035,0.03878581681628597,0.046410791855135324,0.07868516770626949,0.0481581790753719,0.114123449599062,0.0,0.04015099722836525,0.0,0.055302986228035415,0.0,0.0,0.05344079185333348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033649234937306524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053742107691224485,0.0,0.0,0.05239767779277417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055179236408228624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545444457157789,0.0,0.14183617608169505,0.220734747733134,0.0,0.04432914418985489,0.0444270483691362,0.0,0.05616301748394674,0.054801238293597815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03351011781920225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380825694511886,0.0,0.038718753617010666,0.04848524960361534,0.0,0.0,0.04918714403998733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038180761268575766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17401817321243027,0.2191715502264622,0.05245023756297894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05107331885562057,0.0,0.04803638068030384,0.0,0.050466714733307716,0.0,0.10679167196163153,0.0,0.05714068415280792,0.06432116799868266,0.0,0.04956826030243738,0.3233879299018349,0.056868898109154666,0.0,0.0,0.039922517878714814,0.0,0.0,0.08000873316352683,0.04570186940788373,0.05237146741491653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255872267504776,0.12760756758397154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03553312052263436,0.0,0.0801825080554584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614013485355464,0.04387862062792601,0.04621910916006039,0.0,0.0,0.06670374319531497,0.0,0.049323052610374,0.0398546531168688,0.029273096437882774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681675076334028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284355061851023,0.29610345736146154,0.0,0.0,0.06113231629254087,0.0,0.09307521669349388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698583967172162,0.0,0.0,0.06465667766151854
mentalhealth,risslekicks,2020/01/17,"What do you do if your friend is showing signs of psychosis? My friend has been through a lot of stress lately and I think she’s showing signs of psychosis. She twitches a lot, and talks to things that aren’t there. For the most part she’s lucid and is responsive but then she’ll start talking to her phone even though there’s no one on the line. Outside of a few other people and myself she’s started isolating and not seeing/responding to any of her friends. What do I do?",1.115624999999998,3.652699312500001,1.788333333333334,96.49000000000002,87.125,4.45,21.541666666666664,5.985473137389443,0.13270416666666662,378,13,79,3,12,116,63,96,0.05,0.8370000000000001,0.11199999999999999,0.6966,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,0,4,4,0,1,5,0,10,1,0,0,0,14,13,9,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,13,3,11,11,5,5,0,0,0,0,15,1,0,4,4,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106493061068638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14672342732405405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5148816410696538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505871009650638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3777162519149246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15052991865011112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24055933757378034,0.0,0.15400606021174434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144680694952327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544641789278089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3571004301154012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14758200970116575,0.14234033344523528,0.21825447509058496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,comrade__ash,2020/01/17,"I actually liked being in the hospital For anyone who has ever been to the mental hospital, have you ever missed it? My experience was very healing while I was in patient and the staff at my hospital was amazing. The showers were nice, I felt safe, I didn't have the toxicity of social media, and I made amazing friends. I am doing pretty bad rn and am really wanting to go back. But I wouldn't do that to my mom because the expense is outrageous. Does anyone else relate??",4.2374068322981335,5.786951032608697,6.337888198757764,73.03195652173916,71.28260869565217,8.735403726708075,30.534161490683232,9.23628265651192,2.950420496894409,373,16,65,8,7,131,64,92,0.083,0.698,0.21899999999999997,0.9353,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,3,9,1,0,6,0,16,1,0,1,2,11,21,5,0,2,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,2,3,0,0,8,1,11,6,8,11,0,8,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,5,52,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.2171919838406956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.311246176161706,0.22804482568398146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113925845004702,0.1858330339438288,0.1356739637814973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947687135395938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18592505434812995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4026467727608069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21771192765729008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136979416363723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17195368090572447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264891966125723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10873434183512416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105970139108775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22429384261005256,0.0,0.0,0.26066621725114525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264292954018201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425812643049047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22687766740890605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18363998282706054,0.13127499586610522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwmeeaway6899,2020/01/18,Crisis I'm in a very dark place right now and I've taken my emergency medication which is Valium 5mg and I have also taken Seroquel 25mg. I still can't calm down 2 hours afterwards. My heart hurts so much and I'm getting the urge to self-harm. (I won't and haven't for 5 years but the urge alone makes me feel scared and ill.) I just want my boyfriend to call me and talk to me. But he's busy with his friends. I don't want to pry him away from that. I just want to sleep and stop feeling like this.,-0.654553014553013,1.3399833783783777,1.2409009009009004,101.37386694386696,89.0900900900901,4.8568260568260575,15.745668745668745,6.297961479604792,-0.7612431046431043,389,8,100,4,13,127,75,111,0.155,0.721,0.12300000000000001,-0.547,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,3,0,6,4,2,1,0,19,17,11,0,3,4,0,2,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,2,14,3,11,14,1,11,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,7,53,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21632361908618736,0.0,0.16703117180830546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19623778309692413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132769522016832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112192505868551,0.14921490111806746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137042303599905,0.0,0.1091245876429726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475088561198765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056923004606792,0.0,0.2235968548517875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204205369755932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13942060093988368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210411915776022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15354156009139916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822196149605394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783716050085798,0.0,0.0,0.20911268895081114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178942341679008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20901822588369925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16680176295222002,0.17462248578452916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16787969178997356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233746645629275,0.3695861845826389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13450374753949268
mentalhealth,ThePopcornCeiling,2020/01/18,"Obsessing over my Health all the time to a degree where it has hindered my daily life Hello! I have been obsessing over my health to a distressing degree, it has been taking a horrible toll over the past 7 months and I feel uncomfortable in my own skin these days. If I see something on my body, doesn’t matter the severity I always jump to the worst case and think I’m dying. For months I’ve been obsessing over certain things I don’t really care to talk about here, but to a degree where I can’t function normally. I always seem to step back and look at my being as a whole and find being human strange and unnerving. I’ve wanted to kill my self not because I’m sad or depressed but because I don’t understand a point in living. I live to obsess over everything. I live to do nothing but please the people around me. There is nothing more then living and the rules by which we follow make me scared to continue to live. I’m not my body, I’m not my thoughts. So what do I have, nothing. I feel so not in control of my own thoughts, disturbing pictures of me just wanting to end my life. Or that my family is going to be all dead and I’m going to be left with nothing but myself. I’ll catch myself talking about my dad like he already died, “My dad was a great person” he is, he’s still alive why would I say that. It makes me want to break down a cry.

Regardless back to the main point, if I see something even slightly ajar, I have to obsess and figure out exactly what it is. Even things I’ve had my whole life I’ll look at and immediately jump to cancer. Months of this has caused me to hate the idea of living and I wasn’t like this early last year. I just want to go back to living like everyone else, I just want to forget about all the stuff I never noticed before. I want to be able to walk around without the fear of my own mortality. I’m 18, I shouldn’t be worried about my health like an 80 year old man who is visiting the doctor once a month. I have to align things around me if I notice they are out of line. Dinner table, forks, plates, napkins, knifes they are not safe from my alignment! I must do it.

I was never like this before, I’ve always had “quirks” people would say but they’ve never hindered my life. I just want some help, the stress and constant anxiety is causing me a great deal of daily pain. I just want a diagnosis, I just want a direction rather than aimlessly looking everything on the internet and the web telling me I have 2 weeks to live. I used to be so happy, I used to live with no worries. And to an extent I still believe in not worrying, but I just can’t stop worrying over everything. I can’t even spend one day being completely happy and content with my existence. I’m sure I’ll live a long life, all of the times I think I’m dying there’s a thought in my head that it’s ridiculous. I’m probably not dying. I’ll be fine, but I can’t shake the thought out of my head that my life is finite and it won’t last long. But at this point, I don’t know if I want to live a long life. But I don’t want to die from cancer that’s what I know. I just wish I knew what to do with myself.

Thank you all for listening to my twice told tale lol!
If you guys are able to give me direction that would be amazing! I sadly cannot see a psychiatrist at this moment.",2.5481029285099046,3.8580094476744233,3.991679586563308,89.1368690783807,75.16279069767442,7.18931955211025,23.20585701981051,7.793537801064563,0.9349320844099918,2572,72,566,36,54,852,269,688,0.159,0.708,0.133,-0.9792,0,0,2,0,0,2,63.0,1,2,2,1,32,35,3,11,34,1,56,20,5,7,12,117,111,36,8,25,33,2,3,5,0,6,14,3,0,5,29,26,1,3,16,0,1,11,25,19,0,2,14,12,84,16,83,81,15,75,0,3,6,0,28,30,0,9,38,370,113,1,0.09447668955648668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05212868811864697,0.0,0.11791826112119892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036137204458320665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615642588994505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897011385638583,0.0,0.05759211305270545,0.0,0.08039270427558423,0.05322143821787148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494230385218753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816264077206368,0.09705358497639233,0.0,0.0,0.04952850575286865,0.051047868975850834,0.05298182042678589,0.0,0.0,0.051889103597114634,0.0609296489024151,0.04870065923761027,0.040686317138476334,0.0,0.2451297195349897,0.0,0.0,0.048350447540588835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03946157557021341,0.0,0.04183915238996151,0.0,0.0,0.09360144363176874,0.0,0.0,0.0451382627904038,0.12736433502189096,0.0,0.044532107351904486,0.053156270917117464,0.04777025294665816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04317499133254227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04531532471590678,0.08053991983667491,0.0,0.0,0.10416088376804024,0.0,0.04677338813244727,0.0,0.10057219281978393,0.0,0.04663808568378891,0.09696034001055227,0.15063645460405348,0.0,0.0,0.031662866763284184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05332634138354839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226222955407519,0.0,0.05192191780136065,0.07701111162431776,0.0,0.0,0.051324599819092806,0.0,0.23356087944488144,0.1153913457884469,0.0,0.4588355627436305,0.1254133458741758,0.11900493699774095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306392390247231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15082078448758576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929937093368887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0462835482324119,0.1813058633597138,0.10756233724734228,0.04956869649986667,0.050307295496035236,0.032009924959709564,0.0,0.05026492939499562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04509434522095893,0.06549824081386775,0.041246700592464665,0.0,0.05185351715780828,0.133966513793479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05093092529892999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030262093271891305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513165555197375,0.047293823918896964,0.0,0.11292853445743245,0.04300401493795942,0.04927989590389525,0.053365883739151125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273277133401948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544920632032534,0.03949337142767191,0.05411136434177072,0.0,0.054076603096118885,0.0,0.0,0.04452158091064716,0.0,0.035517356388695166,0.07593678435210904,0.04128839545051253,0.043490721200029184,0.0,0.0,0.09414917177198563,0.06053684786627174,0.0,0.15000787671844,0.055090117441798994,0.0,0.0,0.0451382627904038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049176782863856704,0.0,0.08159752586456362,0.0,0.0,0.30648639618870466,0.0,0.03789175080807453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042625258707851804,0.10547984993272336,0.05432176521157715,0.04553607866196211,0.0,0.0,0.19189132850451407,0.0,0.10067029438842147,0.0,0.0,0.06083989053443676
mentalhealth,cynthiatakefive,2020/01/18,"What is inpatient really like? (Not in a hospital setting, but I’ll be at a ranch.) I’m going to inpatient for 30 days, but luckily not in a hospital setting. I’ll be at The Ranch if anyone’s heard of it or been there. I just wanted to get an idea of what that type of inpatient is like. Does it feel more homey and laid back? Is it better than other types of inpatient facilities? I know it’s considered a “luxury” inpatient facility so there’s a gym, horses, zip lining, a chef, things like that. I was lucky enough my insurance covers this basically entirely. I just have no idea what to expect.",1.9725350140056008,4.240903613445384,4.638844537815128,79.46706232493,80.0924369747899,9.344817927170867,23.36204481792717,9.725611199111238,2.600545658263305,466,16,92,16,12,165,75,119,0.026000000000000002,0.7929999999999999,0.18,0.9619,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,8,0,8,0,0,0,0,16,15,6,0,3,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,12,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,2,5,5,13,10,2,9,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,3,5,62,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888368987689545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076646031245387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388520276130912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17417066354330554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23633716754757625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790510690113089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655382565352692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14109869128035687,0.0,0.15348511529140818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6097448076869721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14842158191962765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3958228079466026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730116276828174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17942029881973615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592923223087783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,berserkJoeReddit,2020/01/18,"No matter how well you are physically and financially, if your mental health is broken, so are you. A little thought I've just had...",4.413599999999999,6.29239376,5.805,75.70750000000002,71.4,8.200000000000001,24.5,8.841846274778883,1.8342,104,3,19,2,2,35,23,25,0.193,0.691,0.11599999999999999,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,0,6,5,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,3,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4962162186908674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4678841872599277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4704527154289308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3706092005819176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4197343381352444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KeepYourClawsOut,2020/01/18,"I just want to be normal. Therapy doesn't help. I've gone to so many. Therapists. Psychologists. Psychotherapists. Psychiatrists.

All they have ever done is sit. Listen. Write on their clipboard and tell me they will see me next week. Even when I have specifically asked for them to tell me what's wrong with me, they don't. It took me 4 different people just to be properly diagnosed with GAD and I cried I was so happy. This same person told me to buy a book about CBT and just told me to keep reading it and it would help. I stopped seeing him because he wasn't giving me any advice anymore.

I have a lot more wrong with me and I'm struggling. I  have fetal alcohol syndrome and the older I get the more I think it affected my brain. Sometimes I just don't get along with.... people. I genuinely feel different. Like why can these people get along but when I try to I fail?

I've also endured a lot of pain in my life and I know that I don't handle it well. I get caught up in my emotions and I always regret the shit that I do later on. I've wanted to commit suicide for... practically my entire teenage and adult life. I just see myself suffering and continuing to never understand what's wrong with me and I want it all to just be done. I see no happiness in my future.",0.7174802499705208,3.187333571984436,2.7367668906968525,89.31240419761822,88.76653696498055,5.916707935384978,19.46103053885155,7.348242739294969,0.6880282749675746,996,30,205,18,33,333,137,257,0.18100000000000002,0.743,0.076,-0.9773,2,0,1,0,0,2,32.0,0,0,5,1,15,13,1,1,6,0,20,7,2,1,5,47,45,17,1,6,7,0,1,1,0,2,5,1,0,2,12,18,1,2,4,2,1,3,7,9,1,0,9,6,43,4,27,31,7,21,0,3,4,0,19,6,1,2,12,143,55,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073679091305048,0.0,0.11017014790527407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243975585330046,0.08577780664219309,0.0,0.0,0.07010364672712277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022359916469998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637373764248863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06284173151696232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508074724773593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323776621710678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463255552153712,0.0,0.21541087250719368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21099044847863435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596057414353116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808891563473525,0.09324935929032206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05212459225838823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154377357348199,0.09889178633869236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21947903642532288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381959623794136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162970612140728,0.0,0.0,0.05665468838298888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14562877053776785,0.050363784810482135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752841415958896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451545675166894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795081289099659,0.0,0.10963568240453303,0.0,0.10100474379232638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969332536448748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21440554856660535,0.09001281415808142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311629670742696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285924300772929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581876068970048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019570630912659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618651799374613,0.0,0.10777037807209344,0.0,0.11276197715327475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18020760997553928,0.0,0.1178905690970402,0.11969357738327815,0.0,0.0660548838868612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970107670000412,0.11453500498359093,0.0699902563754856,0.0,0.0,0.10731865951055823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18241262690004412,0.0,0.08269129590051745,0.0,0.09268885158977004,0.0,0.09302124619419748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323104127008072,0.3381329453692178,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Indulgesomemore,2020/01/18,"Family always isn't everything Justifying yourself for the decisions you make to someone who was responsible for those decisions is a futile excercise. simply lost time. A patriarchal man using language like mei usko marta sali ko(If i see her I'd beat her) clearly was challenged by women power and couldn't do much about it. An unsettled story.

He says,he will never forget the day his own sister called the NGO on his father.  His own sister had to take help from unknown women because she couldn't trust her own family. Killing her every min of every hour and every day. Seems frevilous to me. But he will forget all the time his own sister was being tortured mentally physically emotionally while being a vitness he turned his head the other side so he could sit in the evenings with his parents to gossip and raise questions on his own sisters character or conduct. Family comes first isn't it. Ofcourse he also chooses to forget the day he beat his sister at the age of 24 because she challenged him to the extent that she had to get stiches. Pulling her by the hair and kicking with his feet and banging her head against the wall. But ofcourse family comes first. Saying i deserved it. And he wouldnt apologize. That seemed pretty forgettable as well. He says i caused stress and discomfort on the entire family. Nothing has been the same ever since. He tries to get information from me on the day of the incident about the people involved and who were those people but not on why i did what i did. To be honest i am not surprised i am simply tired of this cycle of the never stopping ""haunting of the hill house"". Is this a trick a game that would never end. He doesn't trust S***. Because he thinks he may have instigated me to take decisions of going against my family. He doesn't trust him but he surely does think its alright for a father to molest his own daughter. What i did was ""unforgivable"". My father looking at me staring dead in the eyes and saying i hate you tumse mujhe itni zada nafrat hai only when she is 22. Where he looks for reasons to hit her slaps her across her face. Anything from tying her hair to calling Eco instead of economics. Who really needs a reason anyway, right? You molest her but she is a slut and sadly she hasnt even had her first kiss. She comes home late from work and gets abused like she were being r**** mentally. The impact it leaves you is for life and will never be erased. While you are being abused because his day wouldn't end without it you just listen to him belittle you by calling you a whore and worse. No matter how hard you tried. Abuses you wouldn't give your worst enemy. Crying to sleep for months at a stretch with swollen eyes and soaked pillows making sure no one heard or youd be yelled for that too. Being to happy and joviel was a crime. Often shut down by words like don't act so smart. Staying a little longer each day at the bus stop to spend equally less time home. Sit in a park hopelessly so the yelling and abusing would reduce by a few more minutes. And this isnt even the worst of it. 

I have caused a lot of harm to these people by wanting to live my life. I have caused stress. 
He said dont meet those people you called the day you moved out. those people are a bad influence. Funnily i hadn't spoken to P*****i in ages and she still showed up. S**d is a father i never had. Gave me hope and support no one else ever would. Like i was his own daughter. Literally the person who gave me a purpose and made me feel loved and special. Who looked after me and dealt with the worst of me. These people are a bad influence on me. That i was worth it. That i was special. Sh**** my friend for life and my biggest support. She cried when i did. Treating me like a sister.

I am blessed to have them in my life.

I am not sure who i am after all of this. What am i if i was never allowed to be a normal human being loved by their parents. As a kid id cry to sleep and speak to 'god' and asking him to give me utmost peace if he cant give me happiness. I thought it would stop but it never did and from the way i see it it never will. I did get my peace. I did but these memories never stop haunting. Coming back every now and them.",2.264671925110516,4.562557110311751,3.411289185519056,88.50227138770914,79.2158273381295,5.841819074860594,21.798792291468033,6.99452888719062,0.6661249776082752,3306,98,649,38,83,1066,351,834,0.166,0.698,0.13699999999999998,-0.9837,5,0,0,0,4,1,91.0,0,14,3,10,24,52,6,3,50,1,80,21,10,13,17,123,126,49,2,16,16,14,4,5,1,12,6,9,3,6,39,37,0,4,14,2,2,8,31,21,1,5,31,21,101,31,89,68,21,84,1,3,8,5,126,27,0,12,50,460,140,4,0.0,0.2368217037927175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03996041528767241,0.04157844404570096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041120459910119804,0.0,0.04671453158924965,0.0,0.0,0.03842329202068659,0.08344452342474125,0.12184323754101425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040968877605525,0.0,0.0,0.15399664617701594,0.0,0.17217644108919056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03989640416755586,0.0,0.16466672362553306,0.2255823629183185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04372845380190562,0.0,0.058563624191525686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0417429216526926,0.05620871449471812,0.08851590110089384,0.0,0.0,0.09901271481539872,0.09040014939349103,0.1684050947566055,0.0,0.04490916696679119,0.0,0.2826395410764577,0.0,0.025265969455953927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751153252265532,0.0,0.0,0.03860614189467873,0.0,0.10442754590295852,0.14380526032849872,0.02839869345539735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10638645580296148,0.044762660053256284,0.049334318982424664,0.1025657951562888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03349335518161796,0.0,0.10024652448588316,0.04963077008334457,0.04920967540908267,0.05765784029651234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0552836049282712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636752452506673,0.05291025269115587,0.0,0.0,0.14117912136658464,0.12206233119292173,0.05008234611763369,0.04412378985775574,0.0,0.1258848307397538,0.0,0.05454737208675677,0.04248209507060605,0.09019845254421203,0.04728214109063776,0.06670976504443797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007145629950648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03988500268610081,0.05310943679819799,0.03673317045402141,0.03705158807752356,0.3468545042852343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04895928507052615,0.04794687198900782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772095489822832,0.038003889260946534,0.0,0.0,0.11096994429613916,0.0,0.0,0.2078544428479105,0.04363124802758631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05083672219955241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055977029782168564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032011600404737786,0.1027534847452818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04267349222606062,0.047532228278756736,0.11921273160126004,0.0,0.0,0.07963809348028532,0.0909803118789539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04133510491367042,0.0,0.10001073474585807,0.0,0.04233880892007776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05326060402244377,0.03990553168085462,0.16710622274802206,0.11447928318117195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11340909391745302,0.14128636555581212,0.0,0.07514135984794107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640365941062471,0.0,0.039670026821427465,0.08741246730451617,0.0574323367617237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785172231300575,0.05435222777015592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043157414269452805,0.0,0.0,0.02947317609565346,0.039663288709613,0.0,0.0,0.04492838392990416,0.0,0.04508950311681608,0.0,0.0,0.04816860291285252,0.0,0.03637823108511628,0.0,0.05092296547441001,0.14198697173768726,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,broken-telephone737,2020/01/18,"How Can I Help My Despondent Girlfriend My girlfriend of 3 months has recently been really down about life thinking that she's useless and a failure. She's been saying that she wants to run away and make a fresh start away from her parents and our highschool. It's more than just a passing mood and I'm worried that it might evolve into something worse. I'm always telling her that I'm there for her through everything and reminding her that she has friends and family that are there for her whenever she needs to talk, but I feel like I'm not reaching her. What can I do to help her? 

Thank you in advance.",5.184750000000001,6.0891059750000025,4.911666666666669,86.56500000000004,68.41666666666666,8.333333333333334,31.66666666666667,8.472884824447931,2.2529166666666667,487,20,98,7,8,149,75,120,0.096,0.775,0.129,0.7151,1,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,1,1,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,0,9,1,0,2,0,17,20,8,0,2,3,1,1,1,3,1,1,1,0,0,9,7,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,2,2,19,3,15,17,1,11,0,1,0,0,23,5,0,1,4,68,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17737816663686995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4005687068329308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19158739304921504,0.0,0.20096183958576974,0.0,0.10778737500312123,0.15229182433116462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469800223101455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28577259553545875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505713735216012,0.1041462374042904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229555833489912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261443364391834,0.0,0.0,0.17015376152582826,0.0,0.0,0.15806610648902267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23670492875358046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656497065314238,0.0,0.21048398914859015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952482836188235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16411205750889074,0.0,0.0,0.15088592798835732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17134149699043033,0.18632380986849645,0.1962623342345805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365935392838485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257357763331977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164889372520073,0.21724291187123948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pedrocga,2020/01/18,"My mom cried moments ago for no apparent reason (I'm worried. Help) We were in a local food festival, with lots of people and loud music and she started crying. My father thought it was because of the crowd but when he asked her, she just said ""No, just anger"" and ""We aren't gonna go outside (walk around the city as a family) for some time. I asked her if she was alright and she shaked her haid up and down as in ""yes"" and then I said that we could talk later if she wanted and she just nodded. What should I do now? Can anyone help? She took a pill right after she started crying but I can't get her bag to see which medicine was it. She frequented the therapist for some time but we never talked about it so I don't know why.",0.5171671826625399,2.7074341842105305,2.026006191950465,96.46233746130034,85.44736842105263,4.8922600619195045,17.493808049535602,6.2272716619740125,-0.36641687306501547,564,13,127,5,17,182,97,152,0.107,0.84,0.053,-0.8156,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,4,0,0,0,8,4,1,1,6,2,11,2,0,1,1,31,26,17,0,5,8,2,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,6,13,1,0,3,0,0,4,6,2,0,0,8,4,24,2,16,15,3,24,0,0,1,0,29,7,0,5,13,88,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351139268843005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065778113592168,0.0,0.0,0.1356889201849684,0.2849901415859802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291573825311264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169748347749478,0.0,0.5022890231798846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436909816725225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843106795017046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963480548740376,0.0,0.08662558944049276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043320506631274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376777770969851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12958471247763995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17851615253566758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755813082265358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105671021202699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567163855109153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016853832985836,0.2899786427522991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146151724342162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157717819254262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450239105547864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697502659870934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100695625041845,0.17775833048080786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693477293986044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990312374684913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753818608619076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15479310887630227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SweetPotat00000,2020/01/18,"Introvert living with Extroverts Is it just me or can someone else confirm this is normal?

I am introverted - not that I am shy and can't interact with people and perform will in group projects and presentations etc but I like to spend a lot of time with myself and my inner thoughts and the best days for me are the days when I can be productive and do the things I enjoy on my own.

I live with my friends who I love but are a lot more social than me and I just feel guilty for not being the same but a lot of the time I need a lot of mental preparation to engage in social situations which can sometimes be super tiring and I guess living at home never exposed this problem to me until I moved out.",5.7546328671328695,5.323246447552453,6.564466783216788,79.83593094405596,67.04195804195804,9.387762237762237,29.76311188811189,8.841846274778883,2.154119580419581,554,17,113,8,8,184,87,143,0.05,0.733,0.218,0.981,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,3,8,0,0,9,0,15,2,0,0,1,33,20,14,0,3,8,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,7,13,0,0,2,0,1,1,4,1,0,0,1,1,19,7,19,15,9,15,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,6,9,96,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15833660685670775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19460698563193699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12603877436263586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16826827285800516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628818724783275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656756677838925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16620855429487796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513424142353925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371111561094869,0.0,0.39968273712441305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5130825522569312,0.13617281634796086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15204901307558127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16035888376066654,0.0,0.11187373965662724,0.11636601387576705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14782789607545282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459944738395067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443693719089667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16959260903592846,0.0,0.3076011808169721,0.12783799918605404,0.0,0.14922168564481933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023629354150294,0.0,0.0,0.11977986594005186,0.17595574382233062,0.173411468283339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ani_dracon,2020/01/18,"Hello everyone Its currently 00:30 when I post it and I'm crying for more than a hour, it started when I went to the bathroom a hour ago and so my mom having sex with her boyfriend (she is divorced). She didn't notice me but I'm just a 13y/o boy that's to anxious to live the house with a non flat color t shirt

I really need to sleep but I can't sleep knowing that she is fucking 5m from her teenager.

I really hope that some one could help me sleep

(I am not diagnosed with any ""problem"" but I never checked)",0.6116363636363644,2.5148379818181823,2.6845454545454537,93.6268181818182,82.81818181818181,5.8181818181818175,21.81818181818182,6.980632752743323,0.5041818181818178,398,13,91,5,11,134,75,110,0.045,0.877,0.078,0.6474,1,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,6,0,7,7,4,0,1,17,15,8,0,4,5,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,4,2,0,1,2,1,15,1,10,12,2,10,0,0,1,2,10,0,1,2,8,58,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542761952411307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835334929790607,0.0,0.0,0.1966159625242222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895699099475894,0.0,0.19117506042125293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766472069530995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663029329484444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089742190846668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116655522006696,0.0,0.0,0.17286125442709946,0.3427892094714472,0.2008191004184562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564797890837344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15368074386274744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038338566376773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290486523348596,0.13423058274746544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19814599691268606,0.0,0.0,0.11793418876082745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16668246610969129,0.0,0.0,0.1665330303649918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22298930251896332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5224978688214998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318659639120323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16133707065696196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jiyyamo,2020/01/18,"Need help on what to do when an angry depressed friend snaps to you Before the story, I just want to state out some facts. 
1. Me and my friend has been friends for 10 years already. Since we're in early high school. 
2. I know about my friends depression because he told me that he had one. He has his meds as well. 
3. He also have Insomnia and he got meds for that as well. 
4. He once called me when I was at work, saying that he wants to kill someone, later kill himself because that certain someone made him pissed off. I cried instantly, begging him to not do that. He managed to  resolved that peacefully with that guy. Though with some damage to ahis neighbour's property. 


Ok so the story goes like this. I have a friend that is depressed. And easily get angry as well. So the story goes like this :

(Me and my friend loves to play video games together)
Last Thursday, my friend was expecting me to come over to his house and play some games and just hangout. But on that day, I got up pretty late as the day before I went to sleep at 6 in the morning. I woke up at a bit earlier before 2pm. He asked me what time I'll be coming at 1.45pm (I just woke up at this time) and I said to him that I'm still sleepy. And then after that he got a bit sad that I didn't come to his house on that day because I woke up later and he saw me playing game with another friend of mine on the night before, without inviting him to play together. I know he knows that I'm playing game without him because he could saw me online, and I didn't invite him. 

The next day, I asked him through whatsapp to come over to discord and have a chat(I'm sure everyone knows what this is), And he answered this : 
""I've been in a bad mood since yesterday, it's best if you don't talk to me for a while"" 
So I replied ""ok bro"" and did not message him anymore on that day. I thought that he is having a problem at home so I think its best for me to leave him alone. 

Moving forward to the next day (today), I greeted him and said ""Good evening sir"" ""Just checking up on you"". I didn't get a reply until it was 1.56 am, and he said why I used 'sir'. And he said that am I looking for a fight?  I said no, ""I'm not, boss"". I'm pretty sure that he snaps at that time, but he didn't say anything. I said I'm sorry if I have made him mad or anything. But he didn't reply afterwards. So I thought that everything was alright, and he didn't reply anything after that. 

Then my friend had snapped on me through whatsapp, where he messaged me at 4 in the morning, telling me that
""Not only are you stupid, insensitive, but you're fucking dense as fuck as well. No wonder your gf is often mad at you.""
(note that my gf and me always gets mad at me because I wake up late for quite some time). ""Please kill yourself"" is what he said to me later. Then I immediately apologise to him, and I said I don't want to get into a fight with him. I asked him, what I did wrong again. I asked him was it because I did not come to his house on last Thursday? He said partially. Then he said that me and his other friends are the same, saying everyone has forgotten him. I asked him again, what did I do wrong, because I don't know and I didn't want to Repeat doing it in the future. He said to me that to remember it myself. I really didn't know what I did wrong to him at that time. Later he said ""Do me a favour and cut yourself or something"" and I replied I don't want to. 

Then we got into quite an intense fight in the chat. He said that thanks to me and his other 'friends' that he got a headache till he cannot sleep. Then he said that I'm insensitive because I didn't think of his feelings on the day that I should go to his house because he was kinda excited for having me, but I didn't come to his house. He kept calling me insensitive a lot in his message.

He also got mad at me because when I play game, I did not invite him anymore. It's not like I don't want to invite him, but when he plays the game, even in a fun game mode, he gets super serious and when the game is not in our favor, he kept getting mad and it made the game not fun anymore with his rage. His rage made me felt very uncomfortable. 

Fast forward a few arguments later, I apologize to him, saying that I'm very sorry for what I did wrong, for all of my mistakes. But he relied with ""Go kill yourself"". I didn't know what I to reply, so I unconsciously typed ""Hm.."" and he said that ""what's that hm for you fkin insensitive piece of shit. This is a text chat, not a fkin role play chat""
""Seriously, fucking die""

That was the last of his message to me, at 5.10 am.


So that's the story. And I would really know on what to do, how should I reply to him, should I give him some time alone, or anything?
I really love him as a friend and I don't want our friendship to end just like this. I don't ever want to lose him like this. He's my precious friend and I would really love to help him.",2.493253435884508,3.5030191640776738,3.7983394275627305,91.6555913503972,74.83495145631069,6.748707603076537,24.250409784390374,7.0352671518487035,0.6925228848821079,3769,112,868,36,77,1237,303,1030,0.155,0.695,0.15,-0.9702,0,2,1,0,3,0,145.0,3,7,0,8,34,88,21,0,38,5,71,12,5,7,6,135,165,74,5,20,29,1,2,5,16,5,1,19,1,3,64,46,0,2,18,22,1,12,33,36,6,1,66,24,145,51,121,92,14,116,0,6,3,6,166,48,5,14,64,546,209,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320861732721859,0.039001473999250885,0.05652698115113922,0.029407901618956542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037059831933192205,0.0,0.0,0.1051511842735513,0.0,0.0,0.11633590119282812,0.0,0.16520295319881434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029509622014934823,0.21544540835888876,0.0,0.12029590916991012,0.0,0.0741798250355843,0.0,0.07717000242345493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721775589942757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18266729155692804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02821821632911542,0.0,0.03882222242349862,0.15955151973416812,0.0,0.09132167318635837,0.0,0.03668007282718362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03130308229460453,0.0,0.0,0.0466869511056673,0.031969434652012116,0.0,0.06754280017883488,0.031763679335788934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017870297004177558,0.0,0.033934469826097165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35497319426426444,0.09802108319360438,0.1107904011336182,0.03390387371062279,0.04017206523290191,0.02964372346197613,0.16960039173269534,0.0,0.0,0.03499476290200301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04737884337312672,0.037341431858807984,0.035451542228021216,0.0,0.0,0.2039032645302489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564055464013891,0.0,0.15538709299662076,0.08642688822802459,0.0797360581322031,0.037422744921993406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633312548099266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029678910171535133,0.03953936566004858,0.0,0.03004704242973505,0.09569431755383008,0.13376821431785796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851539493564398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0375636252930221,0.0,0.026206114298367486,0.0,0.0,0.07517458159145207,0.03316666658321763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03763875033255251,0.023949082570284497,0.026879664743952626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03879559747594241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719123266580842,0.0,0.03381812633636927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518248050589217,0.0,0.0,0.09056558194752502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040036313178233786,0.0,0.5042840557291098,0.11242352018764114,0.0,0.035768631113009826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03627870454630985,0.05847158192713335,0.0,0.07073631338904929,0.0,0.05989139593664927,0.02720848531254817,0.0,0.07912636745549513,0.0,0.0,0.028224672102516186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662002605321729,0.0,0.0,0.028407069383318037,0.030891018741327762,0.032538747728141235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04529226388124739,0.03472395715185396,0.056116205055851735,0.12365143995941613,0.0,0.033500683263590486,0.03377140008941744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03052468706067048,0.0,0.058322746661863226,0.16676800354846885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710908499193266,0.032762974565818316,0.03189122878791477,0.0,0.0,0.06813807337411487,0.03832757751255316,0.02572985751094695,0.0,0.0,0.05021278443519827,0.1545664825716467,0.0,0.022759496684392047
mentalhealth,IamTheWambo,2020/01/18,"I am sad and I think living in my bedroom is making it worse. I am 20 years old, I work a part time job about 10 hours a week if I am lucky. I went to community college for a year and a half and failed most of my classes. I am now taking certifications in order to get some sort of job in the computer programming industry. I currently live at home with my parents and have been here since I was in the sixth grade. I suffered from depression for most of my life and it seems to be arising again. Being in my bedroom where I spend most of my time seems to be making my mental state worse. I have thought a lot about moving out and living with one of my friends, but I am unable to make enough money to pay my own rent, so my parents need me to prove to them that I am capable of living on my own. Because of that I have asked to move to the guest bedroom of my house in hopes that I will be a little happier in that space, but I don't know if that will make a difference at all. I just want to be happy ya know.",5.407000418935901,3.8885204331797247,6.459396732299961,83.88831587767072,68.17050691244239,9.734227063259322,29.865521575198997,8.575989854853784,1.8723861751152069,782,22,183,10,11,264,116,217,0.067,0.831,0.102,0.885,7,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,2,8,8,0,0,10,0,20,1,0,4,2,36,37,11,0,5,5,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,5,0,7,9,0,0,7,0,4,3,1,4,0,2,4,0,33,4,37,26,10,29,0,4,0,0,7,14,0,12,10,135,40,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478790126418892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484892304788553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575500217582737,0.0,0.0,0.1282847514761493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268702812568284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486380047568473,0.0,0.06415037473654618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307074861836744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316390385697205,0.12195374206221653,0.12091901962687107,0.14167802295989454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24369139658011185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495943885427966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672705522601154,0.0,0.12306336391806708,0.4336875110407366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438787179411256,0.0,0.0,0.327841194710401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373894074969068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610031859461551,0.0,0.09104391908112223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884276520665788,0.0,0.08320265685981254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726776139202292,0.13296477004746116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22355868081421176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156946415079107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231944216976032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867601356035456,0.0,0.09747800024979088,0.1431944668300892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724220903541819,0.0,0.09849115061250538,0.0,0.0,0.1138234219413844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893893325246387,0.0,0.25025790194593145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581397189120817
mentalhealth,ChristinaIrene,2020/01/18,"anything but helpful When people try to offer advice or just their thoughts on your mental health condition, what are your pet peeves?",6.8460869565217415,9.747415565217397,4.799347826086958,81.1364130434783,67.26086956521739,6.339130434782609,28.89130434782609,7.1686216300943375,1.869973913043478,110,4,16,1,2,31,22,23,0.0,0.856,0.14400000000000002,0.5719,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40580233286173545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34173628576825843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4414183508426607,0.0,0.0,0.2783503594731518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41849994815155817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878996872219432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32968229567260976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819447498509057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SugarSkull888,2020/01/18,"My mother has delusions and won't get help, what can I do? She has had minor delusions since I was young but never acted on them. They go and come over the years but the one that she's currently believing got her to act on it yesterday. She was basically crazy and got people to come look at the house (she believes people are watching her  listening to her and coming into the house even when evidence suggests otherwise) it's a long story but she also made like a chain of locks across the area she believes people are coming in from. If I suggest that she sees a psychiatrist she freaks out at me that shes not lying and that I'm the one who must see a doctor. 

My dad isn't here right now, usually he talks her out of it to an extent and my brother is an autistic, schizophrenic with a chromosomal condition so basically I'm the only sane one in the house right now and she's calm now but it's stressing me out when she does these things and it's as if no logic makes sense to her. What can I do? Will this go away? It started in her late 40s when I was little but now she's 60 and it's like this.",1.5724031620553338,3.559154730434788,3.3142292490118592,89.9218972332016,79.95652173913044,6.442687747035574,20.88932806324111,7.520522993642371,0.6472173913043484,868,24,188,13,22,289,123,230,0.055,0.884,0.061,0.5065,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,0,11,5,0,1,15,0,18,2,0,2,2,31,36,22,0,3,8,3,0,2,0,3,2,1,0,0,18,18,0,0,1,0,0,8,5,2,0,3,7,5,30,3,24,26,1,42,0,0,4,0,30,18,0,2,18,137,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559166347001084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230655882262933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4040232045016728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4118734076104424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234858363196878,0.10460541037433138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895138264329292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062451821090271815,0.0,0.1358683751524378,0.0,0.19120525267448127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012142801705245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4137801491566686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484007601642756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679699724600555,0.11980493048935728,0.0,0.1057842344573312,0.10037883982123434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131063950847414,0.07979017941110647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219234364808496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24299892846069665,0.0909113423029084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486104287008448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041635492823385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19050697487894205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988801395070618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846071051386402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692631862510454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607727005264494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941338293201587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165031860407114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697627233919198
mentalhealth,pvs_99,2020/01/18,"What is healing? I've read so many articles saying you've got to heal yourself. Heal your childhood trauma, heal your adulthood trauma. But what is it exactly? What is healing? How does it feel? How do you heal yourself?",1.487351916376305,4.101223170731712,2.2357491289198634,89.46560975609758,97.78048780487805,4.2940766550522635,25.369337979094077,6.1826913282559595,1.1862655052264808,174,8,30,2,7,54,26,41,0.151,0.8490000000000001,0.0,-0.7622,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,2,1,5,6,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,17,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4209401706433731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24321604286397205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38471227922478224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4876745257450105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4811459726273762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3825230730424333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fifelife98,2020/01/18,"Ive started cutting myself again, after 5 years. Hi there folks, I was wondering if i could ask for some help. You see, i used to cut myself a lot when i was younger (around 11-16 years old) because i had depression and disnt know jow to deal with it. Ive been on a variety of different meds since i was 13, and those help. When i turned 16 i stopped, and when i turned 17 i started getting tattoos to fill the void that was left from cutting. I don't think im suicidal, i have not felt that low for a good wee while.

So thats a wee bit of background for you.

A few weeks ago, i got low again. I think it might have been just before xmas. But i didnt turn to cutting straight away, but i also didnt tell anyone. When i first went to do it, i just cried and didnt do it. But then 2 weeks ago i started. Im cutting my upper leg, because then no one will know. I have my first appointment with a psychologist in a week, since i was 15.

So my question is this, is it okay to feel the way that i do? Like, is it okay to want to do it and feel awful and good about it? 

Im sorry for bringing this here, i just dont want to hurt my family again.

(And sorry for the formatting, im on my phone)",1.0824377289377305,2.185399350000001,3.0354945054945084,95.35141025641028,78.57692307692308,6.3369963369963385,21.996336996337,6.868970318607317,0.2696336996337001,901,25,226,9,21,304,129,260,0.098,0.775,0.127,0.7896,1,0,0,0,0,2,37.0,0,2,0,2,17,14,5,0,10,3,28,1,1,1,0,35,51,21,1,4,8,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,15,10,0,1,9,0,0,3,7,9,0,3,14,4,34,5,26,34,4,39,0,4,1,0,10,10,0,6,26,148,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18092240097603413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816093777502801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135575867908865,0.0,0.0,0.09084616882881236,0.095403008888913,0.0,0.09587936907976656,0.0,0.0,0.12441751076932968,0.0,0.08683706517964937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141220971852377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147865068840639,0.0,0.1120971737865694,0.0,0.1052091071849324,0.08789554736615007,0.0,0.0,0.10662056846237736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11960188338047788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620369269948584,0.0,0.10319912997471177,0.0,0.09798403914013486,0.0,0.0,0.17360741874586647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331693239283184,0.0,0.0,0.17118945867389526,0.08161873706824263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680397740932349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924667529912364,0.0,0.4409262075048052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121680630350057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087766383705454,0.0,0.0,0.049856493350688466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675929214654418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335458561608082,0.0,0.0,0.10825896246455784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708434720826908,0.0,0.0691517461732204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431939673161895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132066705710261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688336903889907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22847332301073475,0.21669462439420087,0.0,0.0,0.0853184004626252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162617712921856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919623040938537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307790862691627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3330034076772191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813846649205463,0.0,0.0,0.1203835117415673,0.08100256936318158,0.2455751524475923,0.0,0.0,0.0946014067305556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066891200546816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13143375602221524
mentalhealth,PatdnLite,2020/01/18,"I need to cry I’ve been holding emotions in for so long. People I knew have died and I grew apart from friends and i experienced some trauma over the past few years and I just pressed it all down. Every single day I feel restless. I feel like I’m gonna explode. But I’m scared of myself, and im scared that my parents and friends are gonna judge me. I need to cry though",0.14706944444444048,2.2585850125,1.5941666666666698,99.4652777777778,86.375,4.055555555555556,20.13888888888889,5.033348758259628,-0.5081527777777777,291,9,69,1,9,93,56,80,0.24100000000000002,0.657,0.102,-0.8957,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,3,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,15,12,8,1,2,2,1,3,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,4,11,3,8,8,4,9,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,5,38,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4427827883875247,0.1299820095465304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091753628567021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267147616805174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16981317428597528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20381779926214452,0.14398617871479044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114315044468345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21770679964224202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846634129720963,0.0,0.0,0.17836394392914667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988910896252505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22379558668935232,0.0,0.192400702009392,0.13972824587229238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4035701096498081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19802022671221964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297905268570088
mentalhealth,yungoatmeal23,2020/01/18,How do you distract yourself? Lately I’ve been doing good with my mental health when I’m out and being productive either at work or hanging out with a friend. However at night or between jobs when I’m in my room alone I get in my head and things can get really bad. I’m just looking for suggestions for something I can use to distract myself while alone.(movies and tv don’t seem to be working anymore),5.6454999999999975,6.16338755,5.9899999999999975,80.61500000000002,67.25,8.4,32.25,8.238735603445708,2.422825,324,13,60,4,5,104,57,80,0.124,0.802,0.07400000000000001,-0.4754,2,2,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,2,4,5,0,2,1,0,8,2,1,2,0,14,16,9,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,7,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,1,7,2,13,13,1,13,0,0,1,0,3,7,0,3,5,41,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488153487751488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382527225558937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20058968908128613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560820246677884,0.0,0.25103012282272064,0.0,0.0,0.20150123473082893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465547182294145,0.2553630251704865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384003268319776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710002707118935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20174041404416146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24210459893582045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254482058232829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390337696570386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21870473607267046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18494786569799554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15960424310426566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20748952608422533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497939835091475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Beady-slime9,2020/01/18,"I can’t tell him! Hi everyone!

Sorry if this is the wrong place to put this! Im scared that my boyfriend is cheating on me with his ex. Basically we Have a school group chat on whatsapp and a little while ago some girl decides to spice things up 🙄 and ask my boyfriends ex do you still love my bf. I freaked out when she answered kinda. I wanted to cry. I texted my best friend in tears that she liked him. He later responded after this girl was still trying to get answers out the ex “stop you guys are making me regret dating me “(when I say me I mean me). now he doesn’t respond to my messages or calls. hes Also one of the only people stopping me from killing myself. i think this sounds like I’m paranoid or crazy. Please help me. Ill ask him if I can get help please xx",0.5725925925925921,2.761537123456794,1.905185185185185,97.43333333333337,85.17283950617283,4.340740740740742,18.876543209876548,5.46131890053228,-0.4760641975308642,602,16,136,3,18,192,110,162,0.198,0.6579999999999999,0.14400000000000002,-0.7913,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,1,2,0,1,6,11,2,1,5,0,10,2,0,1,0,22,20,10,1,4,4,3,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,3,7,6,0,2,5,1,0,1,2,6,0,1,1,3,31,5,15,19,2,21,0,1,0,1,34,8,0,6,14,83,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716126641445248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373974193506998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893085090261644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16238249805255794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15799946046251875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16996668444703564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14785379465700668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954615588366907,0.0,0.1616829741122721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320977141853054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207428231006978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16713794613164554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711888867475055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118923317560892,0.15508288738957735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13965236797985187,0.0,0.10328532688816204,0.0,0.0,0.16854935026994095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485093088219737,0.11768124569839565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072722214926223,0.0,0.16166281363981794,0.3397002367456673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554917342649324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304971088280453,0.15491449821005984,0.1565978261411312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17321067019347033,0.0,0.0,0.24713958333130875,0.2587270518803083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524326292759298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279757829804216,0.09914651251825594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505339532158804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126539796517368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16917599592032695,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luna87,2020/01/18,"My brother is losing his mind and I don't know what to do. My little brother (31) seems to be spiraling out of control. This all started as best  I can tell about 8 months ago when his marriage started to fall apart. He became very obsessive over what she was doing and started acting more and more erratic. My Mom stayed with him for a few days while he was really struggling and things got even more out of control, he ended up getting violent with her, the police were called and he wound up in the hospital for a few days. He had a girlfriend that he apparently had been having an affair of some kind with in town over Christmas. She was staying with him and he again became violent after not sleeping for several days. She ended up taking a $90 uber ride to my sisters house just to get away from him (after he finally fell asleep) on Christmas day. He ended up showing up at her house on Christmas and was talking in circles, didn't know what day it was etc.

The last few days he has been posting all kinds of weird stuff on Facebook/Snap/Instagram, documenting every mundane thing that he does all day. His house is trashed and he just seems really unwell. He won't really listen to anyone in the family when we try to get him back on track. He is seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist but I question if he is even taking his meds at this point. I'm getting worried that he is going to snap and wind up in jail. Any advice is appreciated.",6.349302631578947,6.09882183157895,6.883190789473684,77.43952302631581,65.7719298245614,9.651315789473683,32.1984649122807,9.188382445141503,2.689951754385965,1142,41,218,18,16,375,154,285,0.051,0.9159999999999999,0.033,-0.3056,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,0,4,9,9,2,2,11,0,25,3,2,2,3,34,43,16,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,12,17,0,2,5,1,0,5,4,6,0,0,12,2,21,3,46,29,12,58,0,1,1,0,42,26,0,5,24,149,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369312697372577,0.08499210765872009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520189708837168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06704174044789632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008270523844232,0.07372603825656338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006204675500189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979045141875062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21507583582975295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4328440652500011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390550336405166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547644814256887,0.0,0.10693188786171944,0.12665607788866126,0.0,0.08078329449192664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038742093815384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503219045511833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20037401376580366,0.0,0.05449098840884869,0.0,0.07668424087287838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318990057283122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19968917194866825,0.10538661921255564,0.07815524772155957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609725694141942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072655390447946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650140714822533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968117783388324,0.1122938575245785,0.07653074682709231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906378819981169,0.0,0.09182683097851599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107407887824579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18427014073829576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640419154410563,0.1745716621722712,0.0,0.1083174564174525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594955127700157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035937257765829,0.20439130138106248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023491541864242,0.10976001311434308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441801178258465,0.0770649594200077,0.0838036149952564,0.0,0.0,0.1113244271736883,0.12739723203433914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509643515616947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911129522215589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737110657518268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SpecialCrazy,2020/01/18,"I feel so empty now One of the things I don't do is trust people or let my guard down. It takes me a long time to do so and takes a lot of effort from people to get me to do that. I was friend with benefits with some and although I did have underlying feelings for them I had myself under control, so that I wouldn't care for them too much or love them. I kept it at the distance it was meant to be kept at, with the occasional help here and there if they asked for it. I would never ask for help either mind you. The person had once broken their phone and since they lived in the same building as me came to me for help and stayed with me for 2 days in which we became close and would even say good friends where we would talk about personal things in our lives. But even then I kept myself under control. But during Christmas they messaged me to check up on me and i felt the convo was becoming too close so I stopped responding and on New Years Eve they messaged me telling me that they have started to like me and want to be with me and see me in their future. Told me about the littlest things that they appreciated about me and how they don't understand why I was still single. I told them I was happy that they've told me this but that I was scared of being broken as I had just recently (5 months ago) gotten out of a terrible relationship and my heart was not ready to love another again. They said it's fine that I can take my time and that they weren't sure of a relationship but that we should try. And that they wouldn't hurt me ever. Fast forward now. It went from looking after me everyday asking if I was okay and making sure i slept well (because I don't sleep well and have nightmares from time to time) by being on the phone with me all night. To them now telling me that they've changed their mind and that we should just be friends. Even tho I didn't want this from the beginning. Am I wrong to say that this person is very unfair and that they made me open up to them and trust them only for them to break that trust in less than a few weeks of us trying this? It took 18 days for them to back track. I only trusted them because we were good friends from before, but hadn't seen this side to them. Now I feel super empty and I feel like I can never trust anyone even if they give me their word. I feel awful because before this happened I was in a happy place and a place where I was gently healing myself, only for this person to come along and break that peace. Now I'm back to square 1.",5.684761904761905,4.824909279693486,5.7186453201970435,87.26767241379316,67.31417624521072,8.606568144499178,26.688834154351397,7.310402129719878,1.0603041050903117,1972,42,444,15,28,621,216,522,0.09699999999999999,0.7559999999999999,0.147,0.9777,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,7,1,27,4,33,30,0,1,16,2,45,6,3,5,6,93,88,42,0,12,14,0,6,2,4,7,1,3,0,4,34,40,0,7,8,0,1,5,11,4,2,1,34,13,91,26,71,41,9,69,0,1,4,2,68,27,0,7,38,334,125,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06545669845782562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743003662580955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05163221750196854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20709760486667592,0.0,0.0,0.11356026312532225,0.0,0.13504064905229854,0.08155296266130667,0.12566863052364194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08445586119276441,0.07528709430496865,0.0,0.07811530843531451,0.06360855917662936,0.0,0.0,0.16564072264218696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524428373008834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19508843648162855,0.0667945418768795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866842993300612,0.0527529175251498,0.07090013916546667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282013539835624,0.0,0.038579527438353696,0.07083621393380185,0.0,0.12387075027884355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529845702835356,0.1572128945569054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750342074284329,0.1484847091704161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904965492384737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550870268984552,0.0,0.0721511860071522,0.0,0.13040811764997826,0.06534806679044251,0.062008891614477764,0.0,0.0,0.0627780395773435,0.13329102564797074,0.06987132154749567,0.04929027468154089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911924310281865,0.0,0.0589401787508115,0.0,0.05428254950070577,0.0,0.1139033895020065,0.07131730433952158,0.0,0.06929594858724843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863958536166543,0.05003741905561135,0.16848107374305016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238583586603273,0.2579048148103142,0.15429886761602868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291031260991915,0.15855788172751345,0.0,0.0,0.07024088861727948,0.11744464062092792,0.07392897325285121,0.0,0.05884271215979616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610830715361663,0.0,0.07389557710842334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052265923990554346,0.07870601253721303,0.05897051553253085,0.06173542670070844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391908918154847,0.0,0.16656054466908946,0.059351602747345925,0.1290827609181523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717252750899054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17223203714021773,0.0,0.0,0.21167830042044286,0.08204145578015845,0.10026808003883196,0.0,0.0,0.07687238551989194,0.08882313373409302,0.0,0.0,0.06092758890929075,0.08710814343444064,0.0,0.059231798147633914,0.0,0.1327861001115814,0.06845250472735387,0.06663114440296956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15736624540999578,0.08073490746139945,0.0,0.04755198741954121
mentalhealth,thatsbananas123,2020/01/18,"Panic disorder and no clue what to do Hey!

Im a male in my 20s from sweden diagnosed with anxiety and panic disorder. I have been in touch with psychiatrists  that says i need CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy i think?) but the queue to even get there is 6 months and i can't afford to go to a private psychiatrist.

I know my panic disorder and anxiety is based on me being scared of ""going crazy"" or ""insane"" and everything that makes me think about something irregular or weird triggers panic attacks and anxiety even tho i know very well that im ""fine"". Every time that i distract myself being with friends or having fun in general i feel great. But every time i feel great i also wonder like ""do i really feel great or am i going to feel bad soon?"" which of course makes me feel anxious and depressed.

The doctors i have talked to asked if i wanted anti-depressant but i already take medicine for epilepsia which have side-effects of their own and im scared anti-depressants will make me feel bad in another way.

I just want to throw myself out here in this subreddit and ask for some kind of guidance and to see if anyone understands what im going through. My friends and family are VERY supportive but nobody really understands how it feels. The only time im happy is when im somehow distract myself from this negative thinkingcurve. I eat pretty healthy and exercise regularly, should i just ""wait it out"" or ""power through""? 

I guess im just venting and looking for someone to guide me in the right direction, or any tips at all.

Thanks,",4.123061224489796,6.242648476190483,5.131093877551024,79.22104897959186,72.74149659863944,8.513523809523809,28.76680272108843,9.174902378510234,2.7152175782312926,1228,50,218,28,25,402,161,294,0.20600000000000002,0.63,0.165,-0.8208,2,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,1,1,15,26,1,8,6,0,17,4,0,5,1,62,51,29,0,6,15,0,8,1,2,2,3,1,0,1,12,18,1,1,14,1,0,5,3,13,1,0,1,11,31,13,34,46,3,23,0,1,2,0,9,11,0,12,7,144,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838450789072259,0.0568034890189702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048303536149961336,0.07448222825250021,0.16301563056208832,0.08024484570810736,0.0,0.049666547721643285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280884910997834,0.08080805098430975,0.0,0.0,0.11861588614452508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18353676613882813,0.07209500024685574,0.0,0.0,0.24422314261986255,0.07270326903564561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268247659427515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383065079556346,0.0,0.1196934126169672,0.0,0.06383810964637777,0.0,0.06696173347334305,0.0,0.2514079610407267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975679513799784,0.0,0.037110781471324295,0.0,0.16147428501268968,0.0,0.0,0.2349358839715369,0.07824868764142262,0.0,0.0,0.07561385223935538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5370799096143883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396788718359691,0.07807359291948818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034702173336451814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059648175568272774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422412922468604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669629046123684,0.0,0.0,0.052668608705532985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05402229908702428,0.0,0.333358436804348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226409361450145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910085933281651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066011150319395,0.0,0.056486726023612766,0.1422289049636434,0.0,0.05660253448235127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06018436120482067,0.05468315714726591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060517107512065,0.0,0.0,0.05340649463057202,0.057092051297132136,0.0,0.06539582909352881,0.08123017320745468,0.0,0.0,0.09102763181864652,0.0,0.0,0.12425629440805527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789161452361438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721607742346454,0.0837918836754483,0.056381125382543,0.0,0.0,0.0638654264433957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703012204161076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drashti09,2020/01/18,"Realised my achievements aren't a source of happiness So this is my first time posting here and I am not sure if it belongs here but here it goes. So for almost 2 years I have been dealing with all kinds of sh*t; constant academic failure, emotional abuse (this has been a constant companion since my childhood), spiraling up in my own insecurities. All of this has just left me with  negative thoughts in my head and feeling alone all the time. I guess I have friends who'd care about me but I never really believe them (always been dealing with trust and abandonment issues). 



So in the later part of 2019 I decided to start with therapy and initially it went really well and I explained to them how I was expecting my results of the exam that I was constantly reappearing since 2 years and failing again and again.

 
2 days ago I got my results and I PASSED. 

I used to think that  probably my constant academic failure is creating problems for me and untill and unless I don't get out of this vicious cycle, I won't get any better. I always thought when I clear the exam I'd be so extremely thrilled and finally be happy after a long time of grief, anxiety and loneliness.

And yet here I am with the positive results and still don't feel a thing. I thought I'd be happier, life will change, things will start sorting out and yet I feel as if with every day passing, I'm drowning even further. I cannot seem to figure out what exactly it is.
 Maybe I need a better perspective?
Maybe I need better professional help? Or maybe I just need to stop overthinking.
I'm worried all consuming anxiety is gonna kick back again and it's gonna be all the same 2019 repeating itself. I'm not sure what I'm expecting 
I expected myself to be happy and yet here I am just lost and feel like curling up in bed all day and speak with noone forever. I have this constant feeling that maybe things got better but still something is lacking. 
Any advice?",5.091726677577738,6.235635521276596,5.835638297872343,78.98153846153849,68.78723404255321,9.508019639934538,32.812602291325696,9.757249324022393,3.2283149754500813,1540,69,287,35,26,503,181,376,0.191,0.6709999999999999,0.13699999999999998,-0.9690000000000001,0,1,1,0,1,0,31.0,0,0,2,8,26,23,1,1,11,0,31,2,1,5,11,84,62,34,2,10,12,0,5,1,2,5,1,1,1,0,20,29,0,2,13,0,0,3,9,7,1,1,12,6,40,16,36,39,10,52,0,4,0,0,10,11,0,7,38,202,60,7,0.0,0.09356326954011533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716587543573176,0.06999969586298775,0.0,0.07907428656638749,0.08178624795281131,0.0,0.0,0.13141414338312515,0.0,0.0,0.1074008656004325,0.0,0.12081944873500125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060720935123356065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889690406708618,0.0,0.279360435135472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051236661670982,0.0,0.08353687187933274,0.0,0.0,0.4266776775630449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278201584112786,0.16282351914923565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888275191090728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052157118911590764,0.0,0.06653330763312189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19964105253366832,0.056414213818391665,0.0,0.08650475426734942,0.0,0.06716949612767291,0.0,0.0,0.0610098956666123,0.0,0.08251424990408103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263146352397779,0.0,0.08699132045629109,0.0,0.0,0.2521862940844902,0.0,0.0,0.08104317285212607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05293007808783284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242128483336747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822322312541481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579814002822707,0.0,0.055776898714570464,0.0385794058946361,0.0,0.0,0.06988352465580708,0.0,0.0,0.0862020734674763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3173328360288775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17565962916410352,0.06090440558991145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551382832284897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562878975032232,0.0,0.08514004348727927,0.07556098631075944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117687523101247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188881176722693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13064503803728206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06079284126474389,0.0,0.0,0.11178684136335136,0.0,0.12612668372879854,0.06602015064670154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885138302934225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030592385895823,0.0,0.15738698113004027,0.05059902043469717,0.0,0.1880735094485521,0.13813930241355632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682023432697118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100103458954464,0.07320342493384095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801950679170626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170463025088773
mentalhealth,sparkanditslike,2020/01/18,"Is it worth it to tell my dad I think he has a social disorder? I'm 20, my dad is almost 60. Over the past few years I have become much more aware of my dad's behaviour, I think just because I'm getting older. I actually think he might have OCD or Asperger's but I am nowhere near qualified to be giving anyone a diagnosis. I won't get into the reasons why I think that, but my mom (recently divorced from my father) and I have identified so many possible symptoms of Asperger's or OCD. I love my dad, and he does so much for my brother and I. 

The main problem is just that our relationship with him is so confrontational. There are a lot of good moments but almost daily there will be a huge argument or behaviour that is simply inappropriate. It hurts him more than it hurts me, because most of the time I'm able to maintain my composure and see most of what he is saying as irrational. I don't mean to sound so self-righteous, it's possible that I could be entirely wrong. Not only this, but my dad is extremely isolated and my brother and I are all he has. We will be moving out soon and then he will be totally alone. He has let almost every relationship in his life get away from him, or he has destroyed them by being so harsh and opinionated. I would really like him to see a therapist just to talk about all the emotions he has and how much he keeps inside due to being so socially isolated. 

I think I could get him to see a therapist if I told him I was simply concerned that he was sad and anxious and upset and it would mean a lot to me. But should I bring up some of the behaviours he engages in that I don't see as ""neurotypical""? Of course I have no idea if he actually has a social disorder or mental illness so I would never say that to him. He is almost 60 and I have no idea how it would feel to get a diagnosis for something he has probably had all his life. Or how it would feel for his own daughter to be the one to bring it up. Should I tell him I'm concerned about these patterns of behaviour? Would that hurt him more than it would help him? 

Thanks reddit, and I'm sorry if this sounds extremely ignorant, it really is all coming from a place of love.",4.571684817424728,4.859154896860988,6.099721332479183,79.70113228699553,69.53811659192826,9.869186418962203,29.38148622677771,9.871247098662263,2.6076741832158867,1708,60,357,39,28,585,187,446,0.16699999999999998,0.757,0.075,-0.9926,0,1,1,0,1,0,37.0,2,0,1,0,18,16,2,1,17,0,54,6,0,4,6,83,86,41,0,15,18,10,2,1,0,14,4,4,0,0,23,19,0,2,12,0,1,4,7,10,0,1,4,10,52,6,45,57,19,25,0,4,4,2,57,11,0,20,11,260,75,1,0.07374620229377175,0.0,0.1439313108422964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295384675921447,0.07637882488541292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331221757003515,0.0,0.0515650593284152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928698463152999,0.0,0.0,0.08991000086156131,0.0814468864886149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352582334107283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776068349696238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690390738000013,0.0,0.06453579859416711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295455161302984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06213435608012685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745765914103628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19264673468121754,0.07074407706695031,0.0,0.06185481561914655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04943052489428758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23684050443215196,0.16650097194214747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554901303202164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541048830345316,0.10417824722879104,0.036028669376174625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539276800202873,0.13311765362819974,0.0,0.0,0.0747670742017395,0.0,0.16066246747587673,0.0,0.0,0.07431882662022926,0.07823306661797931,0.0,0.08637066082691755,0.0,0.0783805421564846,0.16263583209813576,0.0,0.056877617518118574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04997233524097623,0.05608730997556094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703990946461288,0.0,0.0,0.07704908531794565,0.0,0.0,0.16627552503144155,0.0,0.0,0.07951087909061877,0.07056515595297215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944874111376464,0.07582337837064512,0.07281547795696433,0.1583516450354926,0.0,0.06297885381647751,0.0,0.1172918800396604,0.0,0.0,0.2350647011005532,0.0,0.07693337244150195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255248984807685,0.0,0.056773429439208926,0.0,0.08255283577736862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665054109976861,0.0,0.059274403947239714,0.12891486260039833,0.06789559495735255,0.0,0.17125004970222846,0.0,0.2362679434435604,0.0,0.0,0.04300200360874745,0.0,0.0,0.07046765661576886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654447708213054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.366710303593094,0.08062989533545505,0.0,0.0474901364129714
mentalhealth,Jim4810,2020/01/18,"Returning to work after suicide attempts - advice please Hi all, I have no idea of if this is an appropriate thing to post here, but I need some advice and would like it to be anonymous, or at least not something I could ask about on Facebook. If not, please let me know and I will remove it. 


Over the Summer/Autumn, I (37M) tried to end my life twice as a result of a relationship breakdown and other issues I do not really want to go into too far; not the first time, hopefully the last though. As a result of one attempt, I have some marks/slight scarring on my left wrist. I am currently in the early stages of returning to work as a shop manager. The shop I work in requires that I often give close demonstrations of products to customers over a period of about 15 minutes, often to teenaged people. Currently I am able to wear longer sleeves so it's not an issue, however as weather warms up, I will be wearing shorter sleeves and, whilst I am fairly open with personal friends about what happened, I would rather not spend time answering the ""Hey what did you do to your arm?"" questions from customers or colleagues as I just get on with my life. 


I am wondering if anyone had any advice on ways I could cover this up. I tried a watch, but am not really a fan, preferring it on the other arm. I was thinking about using a bracelet or quantity of these to cover it but have NO fashion experience, or knowledge of what might work. Ideally I am looking for stuff that's not too masculine or feminine that would work, though I do not normally wear jewelry of any kind (other than glasses), so am a little out of my depth. 


Does anyone have any advice or experience that might prove useful?",6.781406727828744,6.44956629969419,7.120076452599393,76.37198012232419,64.90214067278288,10.324770642201836,33.762996941896034,9.861636050157227,3.164668501529052,1328,51,250,25,18,433,174,327,0.039,0.865,0.096,0.9640000000000001,3,0,1,0,0,2,40.0,0,2,0,10,15,6,0,0,18,0,30,8,6,4,2,64,44,25,1,15,23,0,1,1,1,7,2,0,0,1,20,10,0,1,9,2,3,2,11,0,0,3,3,3,28,6,50,29,4,38,0,0,2,0,10,20,0,18,14,191,48,7,0.09945378251287627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3887403409470367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028959475728281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908079429725104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297586137575624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881150541719044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703267528423146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808653185982901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19456976596448214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459533659946422,0.0,0.0,0.0768377456636739,0.0,0.051960496559481005,0.09540513051320666,0.05652187651538499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794665142497582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987800464278442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227121490102382,0.0,0.20760782007910525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356581012677378,0.054657197927966736,0.08106810666752318,0.0,0.0,0.10805682569808034,0.1016982308193358,0.1404942955732362,0.0485880945311948,0.09967881752403862,0.0,0.0,0.08351612923563574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21100949339046804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374371955899531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744359082519248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06739245691484684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894873039538198,0.08683920677902407,0.0,0.2183407755775366,0.0,0.0,0.09524923208263883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141099748180264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742527947478924,0.0,0.0,0.10677614287974067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656438065060976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385078686824675,0.1087862960669991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660726739201289,0.06372596806652077,0.19542567272893302,0.0,0.11598460073878215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504518001700594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717922723376356,0.0,0.0,0.05866041768474777,0.07894178336618979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785338472088736,0.3620176907910345,0.0,0.0,0.21194734088618114,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,my-mum-gay,2020/01/18,"Idk what to do, I don't have the $75 dollars I'm not suicidal or anything of that nature right now at least. I have a phsyc evaluation February 12 at 9am, insurance was supposed to cover it but I got a bill for $75 and I don't have the money for it. I'm so afraid that im not gonna be able to get the help I want and then I'm gonna lose more than I already have.",0.9432196969696952,0.9573147613636372,4.075454545454543,91.96651515151515,77.52272727272727,7.684848484848485,23.75757575757576,7.793537801064563,0.7746530303030301,281,8,77,4,6,104,56,88,0.062,0.8420000000000001,0.096,0.3705,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,5,0,9,0,0,0,0,7,17,6,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,6,0,9,12,2,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,45,11,0,0.33428366883640354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688903410509796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750869766378555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746494199173953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26735718736277936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22406329682372206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3610837257088919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37397791897698185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854764266913533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656520772720881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19716916887092287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,you-are-the-darkness,2020/01/18,"i think im mentally ill, but also not at the same time? hello! i’m sorry if this is not the place to post this, as i am not diagnosed with anything, but i still feel like i need to share, and if this is not the right place, i’ll take it down! 


to start this post off, i want to say i have strongly debated writing this. hell, as i’m writing i don’t even know if i will share this.

so, i don’t know if this is normal or not, but i always convince myself i am mentally ill. half of me thinks i am, and the other half of me thinks i am convincing myself i am for attention, which is why i might not post this.


i think i have forced myself to become the way i am, having a lack of empathy and not caring about things, and i very well might’ve, or i am mentally ill and i’m convincing myself i’m not.

right now, part of me thinks i am writing this a certain way to make myself sound ill.

god, this might not make sense, but if anyone understands, please help me! i am very confused. thanks for reading 💞 :) (btw sorry if my writing is hard to understand)",1.3564031154118474,2.798309591928252,3.3272787349539783,92.11223979230587,78.64125560538116,6.6678310125088505,21.153882464007552,7.475848149327749,0.5358304932735423,801,21,186,11,19,271,100,223,0.165,0.6559999999999999,0.179,0.5194,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,1,7,13,1,1,7,0,22,5,0,2,1,53,44,21,0,10,21,0,2,1,0,3,5,2,0,0,14,6,0,0,11,1,0,0,11,2,1,2,0,4,32,11,20,41,3,16,1,0,0,0,9,7,1,11,5,132,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771305379868596,0.09126462458390153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669255265021886,0.0,0.09025935006825936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211357014144344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182861637979544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132542638634167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244425530312416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554587664370374,0.0783571982860499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825397411810168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351786621321854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847591914762153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120557264602475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053585328108542746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464278378519652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.331602480305898,0.3490673912953991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132818227675316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746555996531533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877545654829685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291897307734316,0.12039844545955987,0.0,0.0,0.3151365413161899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971217936058096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873365075140731,0.0,0.08722392451925137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455611527161332,0.07763383641822283,0.0,0.08759258436104826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824675881294223,0.0,0.0,0.1009809075913407,0.0,0.0,0.07286817779498955,0.3514005787659217,0.0,0.0,0.06395674646322809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283666965730248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18099909499717,0.06469357893018977,0.1741217227786093,0.0,0.0,0.09861773778781073,0.0,0.09897139417020487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatshortginge,2020/01/18,"How I’m recovering from my eating disorder I’ve been in recovery for about 3 years now I would say from an eating disorder that struck me over 10 years ago. I’m learning again to love food, which is something I’m super glad about, as food is one of my favourite things in life

I’ve recently started an instagram channel, where I have been posting food stories, anecdotes, and recipes.

I would love if you all would check it out and support me as I live my life, this time fully loving food ❤️

@[inthekitchenwithtegan ](https://www.instagram.com/p/B7eIfiKl-6x/?igshid=11ke3qg08ywfg)",6.37873487348735,9.273686653465347,4.792607260726077,80.6899889988999,68.60396039603961,7.657205720572058,29.04400440044005,8.515128840125781,2.255414961496149,476,18,80,8,9,137,69,101,0.067,0.732,0.201,0.9501,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,1,6,6,0,0,2,0,8,11,0,1,1,10,16,6,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,5,3,6,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,10,6,13,11,1,14,0,0,0,3,5,5,0,1,8,47,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11837493143293795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30609624667929725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732890058600133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6459071851876609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18864614994335466,0.0,0.0,0.11791804619553888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615745155219821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048999093050096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789416712000512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185439319879733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061961694388382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280542404660074,0.0,0.0,0.09452012268304892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15153932627573052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887178764136915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786810237673633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28458842179871746,0.0,0.0,0.1719904420145759
mentalhealth,Onewholemess,2020/01/18,"My friends are overwhelming me. LONG! So, I have never been diagnosed with any mental illness or disorder, but I have a history of mood disorders in my family. I’ve had a few bouts of depression in my life and I think I might be struggling with some disordered eating patterns, but this post isn’t about my mental health. It’s about my friends. At this point in my life I’m so very happy that I’ve found the best friends that I have, they support me, they love me for who I am, and I love them too. They are honestly one of the biggest joys that I have in my life and I couldn’t be more grateful to have them near me. However... there’s been a problem. I’ve always known my best friend, let’s call her MC, always had anxiety. She overthinks everything, everything always has to be a crisis all the time, and she gets panic attacks. It’s like, clinical anxiety that just hadn’t been diagnosed yet.  She and I became best friends over the course of a few years, and I love her to death and would do anything for her. I’ve even offered to let her move in with me because her “home” is too triggering for her. Recently, in the last year, we’ve met another girl. Lets call her GH. I didn’t know GH that well, and so when I started hanging out with her and the rest of our group, I was shocked and taken aback when she started having pretty violent panic attacks in front of all of us. While she’s recently started medication and therapy, it’s still pretty frequent and is accompanied by various mood swings, erratic behavior, etc. I really love her company and appreciate her as a human being, but things have just gotten so bad with my friends lately, I needed to vent about it. In November, GH and MC accidentally triggers panic attacks in each other. It was horrible, and literally the worst circumstances you could imagine. I found GH curled up in a ball, hiding from everyone and hyperventilating. I had to stay with her for a few hours as she kept spiraling into more states of panic, eventually ending up in her car, where she screamed and cried and violently expressed all of her inner thoughts and spiraling anxiety. I was all alone, and she was my ride. I couldn’t get out, there was no way to escape the absolute sword fight coming out of her mouth. I wanted to be there with her to help her, and I knew that it was best for someone to be there with her and that she needed it, but at the same time, it was just so scarring. I hated hearing her scream about how everyone hated her and how she just wants to die, etc. etc. she finally calmed down after about an hour of this. I’ve been nervous around her ever since, and I get uncomfortable when I’m in enclosed spaces with angry or upset people. I wanted to be there for my friend, but I couldn’t handle it. Now, as MC is dealing more and more with her anxiety issues and telling me about her panic attacks and triggers and begins to have spiraling thoughts in front of me I start getting so overwhelmed and I don’t want to be near her anymore. I know you’re supposed to be honest with your best friends, but how the hell am I supposed to tell my best friend in the whole world that her anxiety overwhelms me? She’ll internalize it and never want to open up to anyone ever again. I hate being around my friends because all they talk about is their mental illnesses and it’s so overwhelming to me, it’s no longer enjoyable to be near them. I’m so sorry for the long post, I just can’t tell anyone this in real life. Thanks for the read, it means a lot to me.",5.053243675952611,5.7153923487031735,5.795271853986553,80.98202081332055,68.5965417867435,9.223643932116556,29.83144412423952,9.328884781210824,2.458710829330772,2766,100,550,53,45,904,277,694,0.20800000000000002,0.607,0.185,-0.946,1,1,0,0,1,0,78.0,2,2,8,6,44,62,11,12,23,0,58,17,1,6,9,110,101,57,2,13,13,0,0,1,10,3,11,3,1,2,28,51,1,2,11,2,0,7,12,30,1,1,25,3,103,30,96,55,29,84,1,5,0,4,79,39,1,5,34,416,131,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05285031077105632,0.0,0.0,0.12737981918765076,0.0,0.0,0.0347012441953464,0.05350800783568736,0.1951839573480836,0.0,0.050606727001026884,0.07136086250405702,0.0,0.04199224597010609,0.0908526667338635,0.0,0.2322099070718887,0.0,0.0,0.04260680644342293,0.06221320495684879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32130863408198423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421195107383817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04395667923144653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04074223928401317,0.0,0.056052595850410544,0.0,0.0526083162100747,0.043950917111843485,0.1035860480716256,0.0529597011607782,0.0,0.17544982387823682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05221506684707824,0.0,0.0,0.04519625387725253,0.0,0.1707313614477959,0.033703954055832916,0.09231670359143004,0.0,0.09752015842188567,0.09172255318661704,0.0,0.04810528690463252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589941170600096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190060155216584,0.3942462243714345,0.0,0.1066414919287512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0543209661289117,0.0,0.15114073592604532,0.0,0.054241088044345145,0.05751301766522408,0.0,0.034203440628457,0.0,0.05118591478622405,0.0,0.1005059183872956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05326067189323227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608804300985727,0.04159517525475976,0.05756256033508195,0.0,0.0,0.1565408114702128,0.14417222966930116,0.02493002970463513,0.0,0.0,0.09031753108339592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043382748865882594,0.18422146122093108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055585179191245095,0.0,0.05140601468148303,0.15427468629866975,0.05413335292256645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05423539858840154,0.0,0.0756742217151864,0.07871290940282429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034578346176485884,0.0,0.0,0.2993557367159726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03537685339255643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048238585332919415,0.0,0.09774271693817252,0.10382900130901468,0.0,0.04882754385548139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05104247724077102,0.058081795961522714,0.032690271486036517,0.0,0.10076930732416994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04221144161638663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0432364249363778,0.0,0.0,0.05712241622480314,0.1444734158626924,0.0543897706765791,0.04075156030776569,0.0,0.0,0.053346243470920894,0.0,0.0,0.05790672790914653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04101491053417652,0.13380391545026799,0.04698034172252829,0.058355729231728826,0.0,0.03390117968993297,0.032697110108629864,0.0,0.08102212512054731,0.059510453529756514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061381204800437024,0.0,0.0,0.042103995385186,0.15049015293532078,0.04050418159519433,0.0,0.0,0.045880900971138984,0.0,0.0,0.05697168566012446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036249301775757393,0.0,0.0,0.06572157850689161
mentalhealth,Infamous-Peanut,2020/01/18,"I'm scared me freind is going to hurt herself.(this might have triggering details) This is a question and i thought this Sub would be the right place to post it. I apologize for the formatting in advance 


Yesterday she was crying during lunch snd our second class together. I asked her what was wrong and she wouldnt tell me. She mentioned she had wrote about it though.

Later that night she explained what it was that made her so upset and what she had written. She wrote "" I want to die"" Over and over again. She also told me that she doesn't want me to be worried and feels bad when i say i am.

She is transgender and has talked about self harm before but this is extreme to her. I almost lost another freind to suicide last year and i dont want to see anyone go through that again.

I have no clue what to do for this right now im just trying to support her and get her to talk to a therapist. If anyone has any advice or ideas on what to do that would be amazing.",2.301740362811792,4.31141830102041,2.925034013605444,93.4858390022676,77.72448979591837,5.988208616780046,22.113378684807266,6.937597516519254,0.471795691609977,761,22,163,8,18,237,112,196,0.14800000000000002,0.785,0.066,-0.9417,0,0,0,0,0,2,16.0,1,0,0,2,10,9,0,2,4,0,25,1,0,2,0,29,44,15,2,7,4,0,1,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,17,8,1,0,5,0,0,3,4,7,0,1,12,3,29,2,21,25,0,20,0,2,1,0,29,7,0,5,9,117,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859443600961574,0.0,0.0,0.1420220542778487,0.0,0.0,0.11342123730267048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644912541187788,0.14872090836950574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983413833350843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325917144435162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842195613874833,0.0,0.0,0.1206867108648512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579337203023266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719693709761758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16622346562000276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07171340679809769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410021504737012,0.0,0.16121028404247262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518317309261332,0.16010857706627096,0.15320051871795268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561021420705622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548239774074047,0.0,0.0,0.13420278308453834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045900128544193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309765653380776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481819507792463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13583374000941031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15888183175064802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24224374313741556,0.0,0.11278874708973402,0.14199636905923999,0.0,0.11301998532715728,0.0,0.14795941004834795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15513877785104874,0.16094677271109906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279948365884956,0.1239654938519838,0.0,0.0,0.16467532567845225,0.0,0.0,0.13934705530011535,0.11259701616025185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552444887667756,0.0,0.09629312211167697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509646666039356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14403504328769004,0.0,0.2015036367792191,0.15506861804563662,0.0,0.09133373910160587
mentalhealth,shusgjs,2020/01/18,"I just want help I’m emotionally and spiritually drained, my family acts all perfect and shit outside of home but when we’re home I’m the scapegoat, and I’m the disrespectful bad guy when I say something about the way they treat me. Sometimes I just listen to music to escape my reality even the slightest bit or I take some Xanax to escape. I sometimes wonder if I’ll be missed if I’m gone but I know there’s only 2 people that I feel would miss me and I don’t wanna hurt them cause they’re my closest friends, but sometimes I can’t talk to them about the way I feel cause I’d hurt them just by talking about it so I feel really alone a lot. I just want someone to listen or even talk to about this",0.9211486486486464,3.129469831081085,2.767500000000002,91.69625000000003,83.79729729729729,5.321621621621622,20.736486486486484,6.6274283507984215,0.25031621621621625,557,17,122,6,16,185,84,148,0.192,0.687,0.121,-0.9323,0,1,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,4,1,14,9,1,0,6,0,4,2,1,2,2,30,21,14,0,6,11,0,3,0,1,1,1,3,2,1,3,4,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,1,6,21,3,13,18,4,7,0,4,0,0,13,1,1,7,2,71,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605458795740364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177461299372906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15395773500613616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897335597587321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862895080160075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18628526683539687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294146722930156,0.0,0.21391242951268075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895199860559134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13963235102430452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452299059044793,0.0,0.282909885836242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019304747387562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750111486220597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989048725776034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725235640125992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776577791306022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034126881092122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214506923641837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475539731767756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11948611345332405,0.10856438098010103,0.4184182959881201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602977831493103,0.3400405279050658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663549519988991,0.22387083319395665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15293059056095912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017683448516848,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fatedorange,2020/01/18,The concept of Britain get talking is flawed at its foundation For those that are unaware there is an ongoing ad campaign in the UK called Britain get talking. The aim of Britain get talking is to get teenagers and youth (at one point it was specifically aimed at men) in order to talk out loud about their struggles during the ad break. My issue with the campaign isn’t actually the ads themselves however once someone has spoken to their family they (most likely) will go to the NHS. - again I’m talking specifically about men for this next part - This is where I - and hopefully you - see the first major flaw and problem with this ad campaign. In Britain currently it is estimated that 1 in 8 men are currently struggling from depression (side note if anyone wants sources I can send them down below) suicide is also now the largest killer of men under 50 GLOBALLY. So the issue I’m raising is once you’ve reached the stage of going to the NHS why is it that out of  those men who already have spoken to their family are then rejected and reduced to nothing by the 36% acceptance rate for them in the NHS? This is the issue I’m raising that what is the point of the ads if they can’t actually get help for it - I’ve created a petition on change and if you could spend just a few extra seconds to sign it that would be much appreciated [Petition ](http://chng.it/kdKytM96fz),7.109243589743593,7.3006857961538465,6.9638461538461565,76.00782051282053,64.11538461538461,10.31794871794872,36.17948717948718,10.047579312681364,3.5642487179487183,1097,49,202,22,15,348,142,260,0.094,0.851,0.055,-0.91,3,1,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,2,7,1,9,8,0,2,20,0,23,0,0,0,0,21,36,11,1,8,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,5,19,9,0,0,1,0,1,3,2,5,0,3,1,2,12,3,38,31,6,33,0,2,1,0,23,19,0,5,9,136,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.2307188539396801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045165382416687,0.09453537803462576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265770194102505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070930883247495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250543206173799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438394528811712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10181720565552077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228825340514656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005524329016204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088086503260737,0.0,0.13436703308354514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923608828757679,0.0,0.0,0.1174127840815005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701528755159795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05775319670749435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690060226557593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12572151111946506,0.0,0.0,0.11342914322657127,0.0,0.0,0.2517872646993134,0.0801045988396528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280138155011623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22350013542947128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131144558766861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420093884057028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016200477351124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471650559011697,0.0,0.12930649815467507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4750780933847361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972544764676762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666939249394188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397555401128959,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justaregpersonithink,2020/01/18,"Truman Show Hello! I came here to maybe get some advice on improving my mental state. So, I convinced myself I was in a Truman show. Yeah, stupid, but I just can’t rid of that feeling. I can’t walk along the street without looking at every passerby trying to figure if they recognized me. I’m such a paranoid I feel like soon I’m going to confront usual people who don’t give a shit about me and ask them if they are actors. I’ve been trying to tell this to some people I know and to some people in different chats but all I got back was some trolling which went along the lines of “haha I’m the director of this show”  and shit. But what if they were told to say so so that I think I’m silly. I CANT I WANT TO SCREAM. It is a fucking vicious circle. Please if you could provide any tips of getting over it I would really appreciate it. Or maybe someone could reach out to me to talk. Thank you for reading this!",0.6338672438672468,2.9368341111111143,2.369978354978357,93.37237012987015,86.19576719576719,4.706204906204906,18.643819143819144,6.1124844417494595,-0.13299153439153422,713,19,151,6,22,234,116,189,0.11199999999999999,0.73,0.158,0.7415,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,4,0,9,12,6,0,7,2,13,3,2,0,1,31,34,14,0,8,10,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,11,7,0,0,5,6,0,4,5,7,0,0,8,5,23,5,25,23,5,15,0,0,1,1,15,7,3,9,4,103,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15080350000608814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494552381329507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14427198656447324,0.0,0.0,0.11866553043736447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650539530581727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464301060168189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16123559833015105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002451668436016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560615715015169,0.11024900379690236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266993137549938,0.1612557055258974,0.1480415185609913,0.08770581190176271,0.0,0.123426896854269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481236321378728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539484784193405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959318361466968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100781405627229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15552216392783674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209662214917812,0.0,0.0,0.1694012670304385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15436563255790295,0.0,0.0988638230199538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272453579055145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168224703939054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13075811452809166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403968128444855,0.1348858647656341,0.14208068573113347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888450478070507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474630715015224,0.0,0.20955155573412806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16996594045290056,0.0,0.09102421711241164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14305977389772967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487627039349734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962724971207884,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brenthxila,2020/01/18,"What to do if meds are making me worse? I’ve been on Wellbutrin for over 6 months and I’ve noticed that while in the beginning it’s made me more energetic, it started eventually making me become exhausted, have back pain, have more frequent explosive fits of anger or sadness (I’ve had random moments of just crying and getting the urge to hurt myself, I broke a window accidentally in one of these fits), and I have difficulty breathing normally or really doing anything such as going outside (I’ve had panic attacks and cried when preparing to go shopping for groceries or simply step my foot out the door for fear of people seeing me), as well as being paranoid that everyone is laughing at me/taking photos/gossiping when they see me on the street even though that is not true. 

I’ve been taking Wellbutrin XL for my Autism Spectrum Disorder / Aspergers (my doctor said it’s specifically Infatile Autism but idk what it is in English and it’s weird because I’m an adult and have a condition which literally says it’s an infant/childhood disorder) and I’m just worried it’s going to eventually kill me with how anxious I get and sometimes don’t breathe, and feel actual chest pain from it. I’m not sure what to do because my parents pay for my medication since I can’t get a job (almost every place I’ve applied to rejected me because I’m unable to talk like a normal human being in an interview and I can’t work in restaurants because I worked in one once and I constantly was dropping food and getting injured from my own stupidity and clumsiness. I don’t want to work somewhere where my mistakes can hurt or upset a customer, it’s too risky I want something that isn’t too public as I don’t trust myself to be able to take care of others.)",8.103661677688828,7.169866846153845,8.467667942916814,69.76624608423252,62.49112426035504,11.029864253393669,38.225548207448654,10.194018383442646,3.9466371040723978,1406,62,245,26,17,467,186,338,0.228,0.7140000000000001,0.057,-0.9947,2,1,1,0,0,3,25.0,0,0,1,3,13,24,4,3,12,0,26,11,4,4,2,39,51,28,1,6,10,1,1,1,0,0,6,2,2,2,19,15,1,0,1,1,2,4,8,17,1,2,7,5,27,7,38,41,3,31,0,5,2,0,9,16,0,7,11,162,46,7,0.10536860328389752,0.0,0.1028245572013279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551143572561357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903652973029336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670938251580074,0.0,0.0,0.11987199774089667,0.0,0.0810219519095919,0.0,0.2569268902633875,0.11637134393634105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743031349721996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386602726779177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23148492595784606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24152309614205145,0.10784923031108493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959496871404912,0.0,0.08877759277727905,0.10068421591005708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856897290983813,0.053277531792626884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741213333985024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202029851484604,0.0,0.17965021639996356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22559853820140116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045620801170612,0.0,0.11657474787625514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051477777190778375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09970232013346722,0.14066872178523046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704076459715633,0.10614778246923856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410421386609387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20647771869086648,0.0,0.1199628532171176,0.0,0.11221412363815393,0.14280098509211112,0.0,0.22423924586594576,0.12362735301980812,0.11699936441327365,0.0,0.0,0.07304932237261871,0.0,0.11008776386766482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750182538095266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022967089034857,0.08379334251741695,0.0,0.0,0.16793026939642122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716199748554224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111789865213948,0.1042122429159842,0.0,0.07458043973356744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930866160887478,0.0,0.15844815277002994,0.08469129202784273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035241177408095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429826444643602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094739028612763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301287943740572,0.10700693134851676,0.10737960863791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oiuytrewq0,2020/01/18,"worried im too reliant on fiction/media for context: i (22) have depression/anxiety and am currently waiting to talk to a specialist about potential aspergers and/or adhd.

most of the time i feel like i NEED to be engaging in content at all times. like right now i am also listening to a youtube video in another tab, but thats just the tip of the iceberg. i almost never do anything without also distracting myself with at least one video/podcast at the same time. and whats more, generally its the same stuff ive seen/heard before, and im barely paying attention to it, i just feel like i need it.

i guess this is something rooted in attention issues, but thats not my whole concern. its also the extent to which i rely on this stuff emotionally. like, i often feel very bad anxiety and cant focus, and in those times the only way i  can think of to help is to rewatch some youtube video. i rarely engage in anything new because so much of my media consumption is based around comforting myself, so trying new things makes me feel anxious. i practically had an anxiety attack in the cinema the other day just because the film i was watching (rated suitable for all ages btw) was unfamiliar and made me nervous. i watched a new tv show recently and it also caused me to feel extremely anxious for the same reason..engaging in new characters and ideas is just so exhausting and anxiety inducing. plus, if i start relating or caring for a character a lot and something bad happens to them or they turn bad, it affects me a stupid amount emotionally and can make me feel awful. so i always just go back to the same safe stuff that i half listen to and gain nothing from. my family think i am strange and childish (fair enough).  im never trying anything new or trying to focus on whatever is causing me to feel bad, i just want comfort and distraction. even when i rely on rewatching stuff when im feeling anxious, it doesnt always help, but its all i feel able to do. 

plus, i also have a tendency to daydream a lot. its like, i have characters and narratives in my head, who ive had in my head since i was like, 8. i often cant focus on other media or tasks because im thinking about them. i dont know how unhealthy this is, i just know it seems kind of weird, and i dont know if i should be trying to detach myself from it, but that idea scares me. 

i also am kind of obsessed with one main piece of media and have been since i was 15, and a lot of my creativity and friendships especially online are based around it. i wonder if i take that to an unhealthy level too. 

should i be trying to detach myself from these habits? does anyone else do them? i know focusing on one thing properly is advised in cognitive behavioural therapy (or it as to me) and is viewed as a good thing, but sometimes when i try, it feels like ive left myself vulnerable to bad feelings by not filling my head with safe content as a buffer.

partially just a vent but any advise and/or personal experience is highly appreciated.",7.0622904874429855,6.38645501362862,7.836406000989175,72.60560312139367,64.45144804088586,10.913205473429684,35.11947024234764,10.31137664058796,3.5764984228169467,2371,95,436,49,31,798,256,587,0.133,0.738,0.129,-0.6548,1,0,2,0,0,0,66.0,0,0,4,1,33,31,2,5,26,1,43,4,3,9,5,112,79,53,0,8,25,0,11,7,0,2,1,2,0,1,36,27,0,3,25,6,1,2,10,14,0,4,8,16,64,17,69,66,21,49,0,0,3,0,13,25,0,19,28,325,100,3,0.0549785762286306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607356467025853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055053102454091236,0.0,0.0,0.2637980852809404,0.09149315932827068,0.0,0.0,0.03738731713118015,0.057649830846088074,0.16823384132768718,0.18633042632639835,0.0,0.038442298814627386,0.05633204841378432,0.13572805127362714,0.0978851779570455,0.0,0.0625460674250322,0.0,0.04227513149483567,0.22952407347121656,0.1005432893288336,0.0,0.046782719007087616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056054322595117896,0.11295628466524962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03545663340333596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04811212255176185,0.0,0.12886896376177026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045927545742205485,0.1236869966863096,0.0,0.05680756594397943,0.0,0.03631283108370897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377959711326282,0.051828908700371434,0.0,0.3057870206883575,0.11783011752891798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03124559185251715,0.046113421299693765,0.0,0.0,0.06056510005532724,0.0,0.04861737338944175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16927164159060287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370196149480443,0.05808788431884222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12412824109365075,0.29693148348984466,0.05738334970015418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450345362173685,0.12085915072509247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05973438393755012,0.0,0.0,0.18801828689109384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022245837127173,0.0,0.052022058153890736,0.07339725309650376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040415579444101436,0.0815318352850394,0.08480573461846924,0.2654932575740219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05275342667177164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176471832776916,0.041813684651401166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048005172140298064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056527133031972786,0.054284711360916185,0.0,0.0,0.04695140370141361,0.0,0.0,0.055043145895028574,0.0,0.0,0.05005043094762925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095769277850747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465038798202466,0.05437521768866972,0.0,0.038914119227803634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25174926509064977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04133704715569698,0.04418969702111948,0.0,0.0,0.0628727933478682,0.0,0.10957596929841104,0.1056841551290888,0.0,0.0,0.1282337996996511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22396106622428888,0.059800903441160735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04536308321091253,0.032427788705438804,0.04363943476820698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061381616961118275,0.0,0.052997385569332,0.05962192069090405,0.0,0.055833412883772436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,savemysauce,2020/01/18,"I want to escape my life I’m supposed to be at my first math class of the semester right now. But I’m in the caf instead, doing nothing. I couldn’t stop crying all morning. I can’t live like this anymore but I can’t escape either because my little brother and sister depend on me. I just want my life to get better. I’m going in circles all the time trying to be as mentally healthy as possible but I always come back to this. I have no money, no friends, my family is toxic and I have no idea what I’m gonna do for my future. I’m totally lost. I want to escape to some kind of tropical paradise where I can be free, but if that’s impossible I’d escape another way. I’m having suicidal thoughts again. I have absolutely NO ONE to talk to them about. I’m ALL ALONE. the best kind of help I can get it to write a fucking post on reddit. I’m so desperate for help I went to the front office of my college crying but they said there were no councillors around.",1.0464778325123163,3.0077804827586228,3.539928571428572,87.76132142857145,81.61083743842364,6.424532019704434,22.46527093596059,7.554174236665415,1.0019814778325125,750,25,159,12,20,261,118,203,0.14,0.627,0.233,0.95,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,4,10,9,1,0,6,0,16,3,0,1,4,26,37,11,1,5,8,2,0,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,5,4,0,1,2,0,2,4,8,2,0,2,5,1,23,8,26,27,7,22,0,1,0,1,10,9,1,3,8,106,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445430314752592,0.0,0.0,0.12408858731165175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563764137333996,0.0,0.0,0.14789746057276526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13275783173973593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467220902902067,0.0,0.0909086160326492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650334075107264,0.13189387707556455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12846278783076875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276258741103341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140587036446263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12685039327340294,0.0,0.0,0.1152179144558245,0.13786881609637086,0.1558291435013502,0.0,0.08475434406596727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19991816549201014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835027007349018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105930958454993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106706747975467,0.07285766742520859,0.14946801694068973,0.13168503237559745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16279364221443324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15028854651260262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309481145059244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010547390311268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681223191620819,0.14282587001076946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735669858560106,0.14185733002425133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467984064649168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631246472154008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11986550945096246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839302070745104,0.08695923917788585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101249873122103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638832358380662,0.11837291118206128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13824553967425252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HarryWR21,2020/01/18,"Does anyone else have physical twitches from bad thoughts? For the last 6 months every time I have a negative thought about myself or think about bad memories my body will randomly twitch. Normally it’s my neck sharply turning my head into my shoulder and then the thought is gone. Lately it’s got to the point where I don’t even think about the bad thing before my body does it, it seems to pre see the thought and my body reacts? Has anybody else suffered from this?",7.247333333333334,7.120169066666668,6.114444444444448,83.28500000000003,63.88888888888889,9.422222222222222,34.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.7189333333333336,376,15,73,5,5,112,61,90,0.187,0.813,0.0,-0.958,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,6,0,6,8,6,1,0,14,17,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,6,1,9,0,9,10,0,9,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,3,5,43,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101087008327976,0.1480179229470189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618580638715261,0.0,0.0,0.12292613338642018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.481392624770682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25283854037665754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24135816531578425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954154870040428,0.0,0.12171508093775005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553909311565773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14825922074311493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177554389427657,0.16295891332135606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530782574381045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415416404978978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656285266416754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511714663609758,0.13151236356706794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597383039295687,0.18513024789148172,0.0,0.4587453159752692,0.08423668771869937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15713267610467155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SocietySoreToTheEye,2020/01/18,"Can PTSD be diagnosed from complex trauma? I’m trying to figure out my diagnoses and last year I had a horrible depressive episode. This was caused by some other events (about 4) and I will get emotional flashbacks of something is similar or even just a trigger. I have most of the other PTSD symptom, though some are overlapped with BPD. How should I approach this with my therapist. She gave me the idea of it being PTSD but didn’t elaborate as I ran out of time, or she wants to know me better.",4.757767857142858,6.173678645833334,5.24607142857143,81.87750000000005,69.83333333333334,8.81904761904762,30.380952380952376,9.23628265651192,2.671570238095238,394,16,74,8,7,126,73,96,0.064,0.8809999999999999,0.055,0.0516,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,4,0,11,3,0,3,0,22,17,8,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,5,0,11,1,14,8,3,9,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,5,4,57,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16053949098465084,0.0,0.0,0.2286178036999652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18647081206229627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15634271724184629,0.3684775037265012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20418531631058692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989210021429385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483659110251304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20491373264615154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975852183725706,0.14796284470995827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6365607137598414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974279195863726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18866855013384926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107584507825907,0.0,0.0,0.17834225847237048,0.0,0.10584564123497653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12324001275639444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070650670072545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689278450144013
mentalhealth,patagoniac,2020/01/18,"People with anxiety disorders, at what point did you realize you needed medication? How was your everyday life?",6.881666666666668,10.637633833333336,8.242222222222225,52.00000000000003,71.77777777777777,14.711111111111116,36.77777777777778,12.161744961471696,7.609244444444442,91,5,11,5,2,31,17,18,0.10800000000000001,0.892,0.0,-0.264,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,4,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3311536970648092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4961205027302604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30575749870622376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4360832735546569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32097666521838364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001060115451088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092135975520886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZeeStarr22,2020/01/18,"How do I know if it’s extreme shyness or Social Anxiety Disorder? Where is the line? I’ve always been shy but idk if it’s just that, or SAD. In certain public situations, my heart will start racing and I’ll be shaking. Other times, I’m okay, yet still shy.",-0.3439150943396214,1.9213084528301887,2.3560141509433983,89.97100235849057,96.54716981132074,4.914150943396227,19.83254716981132,6.6274283507984215,0.5113792452830195,200,7,41,3,8,69,45,53,0.301,0.616,0.083,-0.8782,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,1,1,5,1,1,1,1,10,8,7,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,5,0,7,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,4,4,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927479252761533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26914639505021504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4032237779734566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4169162289853235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19335470479526976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39546785264241857,0.0,0.3586429241801137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24902468668755065,0.0,0.2809691866720996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051529266666773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,minamespollita,2020/01/18,"I think I’m depressed but don’t know how to tell my SO im 23 y/o (f) and I’m sad, all the time. I haven’t been able to get a good nights sleep for the last month almost, I go to bed at 10 and lay awake until 3am.
I feel like I am at a constant battle with myself to pick myself up out of my little black ball of dark and twisty and whack on a smile for everyday life.
My family lives 4000km away, I basically have no friends as I’ve never been great at making friends and suck at small talk and I’m quite introverted, and I’m just sad, constantly, and I don’t know how to tell my SO this as I can’t pin point why I’m feeling this way and I know they’ll “need a reason” like they always do (they’re not a bad person, they love me dearly and are the type of person who is logical, theyre a very logical person and I’m not) And I’m lying in bed silently sobbing because I’m lost and sad and have no one to turn to and I’m kinda just venting here because strangers on the internet always seem to be kind and have advise and I just needed to get this off my chest.

Do I see my doctor and have a mental health plan drawn up and get in to see a psychologist? Or do I try and talk with my SO and see if they can try to comprehend how I’m feeling ?",2.0869924812030085,2.3509768571428573,4.190939849624062,91.26353383458648,75.07142857142857,7.3233082706766925,22.23684210526316,7.273561745256523,0.4499642857142865,960,21,240,10,19,333,142,280,0.14300000000000002,0.7120000000000001,0.145,0.2008,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,4,3,10,18,2,0,12,0,19,6,2,6,2,54,51,33,0,3,8,0,3,2,2,1,3,0,2,3,4,24,0,0,11,1,0,1,9,9,0,1,3,7,26,9,34,46,1,27,0,6,4,1,16,16,2,5,11,135,30,3,0.11756010471327945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771946334840674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956388493301688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11045158822012953,0.0,0.09815777694673396,0.1433270973595459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540814184054465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125434592703868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032774862220567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082520414229416,0.0,0.1783257636868606,0.08398496229678644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816532905620624,0.0,0.1842609077949062,0.0,0.06681211668223297,0.09860383823210908,0.0,0.1296104304700185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496089395188326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698508650559506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242075842256495,0.19382387726422476,0.09582717587948388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303617862432576,0.1148678579453013,0.1178261090703583,0.10380772626278753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12833074149321205,0.0,0.1061025843566652,0.0,0.07847228276528775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847293511926495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383535399331833,0.0,0.0,0.17433865609243746,0.09066960010544962,0.0,0.0,0.11032219453351616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966176943314167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3079468467930355,0.0,0.0,0.11113229773797374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503964212189245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087136725304246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810405486952508,0.10702230408222073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764500521495255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18898071814182715,0.2055054263815399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753277682312922,0.0,0.0,0.06855024245163223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15963118850474525,0.12787163569416932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969993982786141,0.0,0.09331373914894348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607970919915942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wtfjtrk,2020/01/18,"I'm back to square one and feel the worst i have ever felt. (Rant?) About a month ago i was motivated enough to live and wanted to bring changes in my life, i even got as far as creating pinterest boards for myself regarding how i could become healthier physically and improve my mental health as well. I had chosen a lot of workout videos, and was cosidering doing keto and all of a sudden i fell into this slump again where i just want to stay in my room and avoid every interaction possible. I've had countless thoughts of how i could end it and i feel miserable. It feels suffocating to not be able to do anything, it feels like even my bones are giving up.",4.74091452991453,5.805938715384617,5.564871794871795,80.89235042735045,69.53846153846153,8.854700854700855,27.52136752136752,9.150863307647796,2.133803418803419,523,17,103,10,9,171,90,130,0.07200000000000001,0.804,0.124,0.5994,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,11,5,0,2,4,0,11,3,1,3,2,27,23,12,0,4,2,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,8,0,1,7,2,0,2,1,3,1,1,7,6,14,2,18,13,4,17,0,1,1,0,2,7,0,1,8,74,18,1,0.1799831174576034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595441740662706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811077011213053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383959076300757,0.0,0.0,0.19877721267654344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903982733604287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287403747860674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594116202479066,0.18597067285368046,0.0,0.237754303239078,0.16280503396833962,0.15164353906623468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640194882966231,0.12857997507403918,0.17281201788119915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17265620650469765,0.0,0.0,0.14394894080152965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913136374674255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712739859344802,0.08793065989136163,0.0,0.15892839015863472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301521020526626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18138064991625566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436608072155576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196121838896322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20290392197311893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918380556940225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288649095202635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21231741175654345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182643769784108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zoniccc,2020/01/18,Any way to grow hair healthier and softer without conditioners/oils etc? Anything dietary for example to stimulate your hair to grow healthier.,8.689130434782609,12.048226826086955,8.390652173913043,55.38858695652178,63.34782608695652,13.295652173913044,46.28260869565217,12.161744961471696,7.775191304347825,119,8,14,5,2,38,18,23,0.0,0.917,0.083,0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3424780580132698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4144353663660886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5616680944871723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3997491668036287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4854705574588628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlakeJ925,2020/01/18,"What’s wrong with me? I am constantly paranoid and anxious about the people in my life leaving me. Whenever I’m in a group with my friends, I just act like a complete dumbass. I’m extremely chaotic. When I’m not panicking or being stupid, I’m so hyper that I can’t focus on one thing for 30 seconds. It seems like the only time I’m calm is when I’m at work. This is starting to affect my relationships, especially with my significant other.",2.6549719101123586,4.662674764044944,4.924030898876406,79.57458567415732,76.64044943820224,8.045505617977529,29.10252808988764,8.841846274778883,2.5944258426966287,350,16,67,8,8,122,64,89,0.182,0.6629999999999999,0.154,-0.5752,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,5,6,1,0,4,0,5,1,0,1,0,9,13,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,2,0,0,9,4,10,12,0,10,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,7,43,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106791713712324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883391794234965,0.2971844279990716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21246941074490808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911922730409792,0.0,0.0,0.1942452887941687,0.2687086593989292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186351583921059,0.2091549054374952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906549442879099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952541613932076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503556727715094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946510812220884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827021598941456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16035855530117976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20020807424069784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3006765370218413,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BreadtubeMoxie,2020/01/18,"Is the best help available or waiting for political changes, rather than scientifical ones? 90% decrease in schizophrenia cases in my area and it doesn't seem to get heard. I'm talking about Open dialogue model in western Lapland, Finland. Arctic Europe stuff. They do least coercive, least medicated help from hospitals but not limiting there, they'll also meet people in crisis in their own homes or cafeterias and are meeting their family members as well. This is all pretty exceptional, rest of the country does psychiatry just how world overall seems to be doing it. I'm really frustrated their work methods and ethics won't seem to spread around the world like a wildfire.   


I have started vloggin about this and about radical mental health and therapy politics overall, it's here if you're interested. But if watching videos isn't really your thing just search Keropudas hospital studies and results to catch up with what I mean. 

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Y7i5WpFwSk](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Y7i5WpFwSk)  


I hope everyone is having a good or okay or dealable week and if not, that you'll at least have cute pet or room mate to give a hand or a paw within everything.",8.801112706389093,10.985087994974878,7.268144292893036,68.27081658291459,61.01005025125628,10.509834888729364,35.31981335247667,10.608840637214634,4.222884852835607,977,42,143,24,14,292,141,199,0.049,0.773,0.17800000000000002,0.9782,0,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,5,3,12,9,1,0,7,1,15,4,1,2,1,37,27,21,0,5,17,0,1,1,1,3,2,1,3,0,9,10,1,2,4,1,0,1,5,1,1,1,1,3,11,8,24,22,7,17,0,0,1,0,15,14,0,13,3,100,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602479121696992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142047995530014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785040525337405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799377990166669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488511507156459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16253291977454862,0.15287028466569355,0.0,0.16035028785284647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886753945430445,0.16317048068083634,0.0,0.14266749126501446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18080287305229148,0.0,0.0,0.2280219869056707,0.0,0.1706190046481544,0.16894256703600966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309975257487333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18528315819710608,0.0,0.17135266790706247,0.17141560348270873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152606734030504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11792235302681657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17304761408429298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179342346784284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4645438932165196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12039401129959695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194717910024888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671579848286095,0.0,0.0,0.19451828649772326,0.0,0.1130034611914628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364398298357922,0.0,0.1529356989857512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12383107764453505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tamantha10,2020/01/18,"Life's got too much and I'm at the end of my rope. I (21, F) moved to uni a few years ago, and whilst I needed to get away from my hometown, the new place has just thrown up other issues that are slowly driving me insane.

I wasn't sure about coming to uni in the first place; I had no idea what I wanted to do afterwards, so had no indication of what course to do. I eventually picked English as it was my best subject. I hate it. The teaching is sub-par at best, and I have no motivation to either go in or complete the work. I had two hefty deadlines due last week that I had to have extended, and I still haven't worked on them. I open my laptop and stare for hours on end, usually crying periodically when my brain wakes up and realises what I'm doing (or not doing).

My dad can't afford to (/chooses not to) help out financially, and my student finance just keeps going down. My boyfriend has a chronic health condition and mental health issues that make it difficult for him to find work. We live together, and therefore a lot of the costs fall on me. I have no money to treat myself or go out whenever I want to, as we have to budget quite strictly in order to eat.

We live in a house shared with four other people, we have the loft space. The house is a lot for rent, and we don't get much for it. There always seems to be something going wrong and we're always contacting the landlord. Over the past few months, I have barely left the house, confining myself to my room, or my boyfriend's. I've had health issues that have knocked me down so much and my anxiety and depression seem to have increased tenfold. This has made me irritable and snappy towards my boyfriend. He does everything he can to make me feel loved and all I seem to be able to do is snap. I am trying to be better, but I hate how I've become. My mental health is not an excuse.

I have about 5 months of uni left, then I'm finally finished. But these five months just feel like they're going to be a continuation of the stagnation my life has become. I have finally figured out what I'd like to do after uni, and English is no part of it. I see no point in putting any effort into the degree any more, but I can't move forward with what I want to be doing until uni is finished.

I recently applied for a bunch of jobs in the city, stressed by the lack of money. But now I've had one rejection and a minute to think, I'm not sure I'd cope with a job alongside uni. It would totally override uni and make it even more impossible for me to get work done.

I just want to skip forward a few years, to living in a cosy little home we love, being financially stable once more, to being settled and happy with my boyfriend, a kid or two, and all the pets we keep talking about.

But I'm stuck. Stuck in this constant cycle of waking up, eating barely one meal a day, stressing about all the work I have no motivation to do, wanting to hide myself from my boyfriend because I don't want to make him miserable with my depression-fueled irritability. I have no idea what to do. I have no idea how to get through these next few months. I am at the end of my rope and I can't stand it.

I lost my mum when I was 4, and somehow I think if she was still around I'd be in a much better place.

If anyone has any advice on how to cope through the next few months til I can actually start my life, I would love to hear it.

TLDR; My uni, living, and mental situation are dire, I can't cope.",5.204462025316456,4.689533030942338,6.129591772151903,82.77565348101267,68.19831223628691,9.022798874824188,28.74546413502109,8.395991825355821,1.7684567932489443,2679,78,582,34,40,891,290,711,0.11199999999999999,0.809,0.079,-0.9595,4,0,1,0,0,1,82.0,7,0,1,15,23,24,2,3,34,0,67,17,3,12,6,110,115,47,0,12,21,2,2,2,0,2,8,1,6,1,25,42,3,3,15,0,6,14,21,10,0,7,16,5,78,14,100,89,25,97,0,4,2,3,25,41,0,13,46,402,103,13,0.05740574698058443,0.0,0.056019728174494236,0.0,0.0,0.05609623156027893,0.050886731033715285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553236033271184,0.0,0.0,0.11711362942122093,0.0,0.04391523931370797,0.0,0.0,0.040139433038924435,0.0,0.0,0.05110328553784372,0.0,0.0,0.05393458896989425,0.0,0.0,0.03499401053848448,0.12680027479914524,0.0,0.0,0.12048757960596725,0.10154143635156124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408379885071963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04944996797155637,0.06018883351910132,0.062035218720775276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305751749195955,0.03702195774351976,0.0,0.04944348575691231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0502361560332117,0.05874601001078369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748082104316522,0.0,0.0,0.15253335868913315,0.0,0.0,0.03791595447418192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05159258384221587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05805214104617391,0.04101067711314012,0.0,0.1257703796929714,0.052467812747460416,0.04882929905594567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996853385009895,0.0,0.16312504462512215,0.0,0.045912619975161134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06110948511635975,0.0,0.11335258078964228,0.0,0.2440784985064459,0.06470044896972749,0.0,0.038477862139873226,0.0,0.05758264480003799,0.0,0.056533097268731874,0.1987155737174066,0.0,0.1944123026686257,0.0,0.17975005609930625,0.11393269205231862,0.10204973110218207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04679334563216176,0.0,0.0,0.12474302412270745,0.0,0.12164213034604955,0.05609109659686125,0.057535639505394975,0.20276130522358102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06266515408401095,0.0976086264679085,0.15543278375993527,0.05431870580592306,0.15327512748988328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17355447294192866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291035977856495,0.12202644831288326,0.16879931688253427,0.04256563400052454,0.0,0.05544282815169966,0.1221033263357038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061135247013417625,0.07779923965290618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062164829830767585,0.05480028108863301,0.03979791689871,0.0,0.17993036221287556,0.0,0.0542669860738603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057708631289195074,0.0,0.061058078126918915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05668124966240929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04574494799640925,0.15678010812614931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452646481268982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044193748616700494,0.0,0.0,0.04063208317861584,0.0,0.0916886073854422,0.0,0.13151617842497246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820847432018216,0.0,0.0,0.046140564931945946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356656944537758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03897473398761892,0.0,0.11215414683750588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322432007626859,0.0,0.20315638140460154,0.0,0.046047427566545895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20896033750506107,0.0,0.0,0.08155879120732641,0.06276417261813423,0.0,0.0739348378683011
mentalhealth,craftyheidi,2020/01/18,"I constantly feel like nothing is real To go off the title I pretty much always feel like nothing exists, it’s a very mild feeling but it’s persistent, I’ve also found that my emotions aren’t as prominent as they should be, namely happiness. This is slightly unrelated, but I’ve heard people yelling at me to do certain tasks while I sleep, they wake me up and I think they’re real for the first few seconds or so before realising they’re not. Sometimes I can’t tell if they are real or not but they sound horrifyingly realistic. Ik you guys can’t diagnose me, but do you have any idea of what this may be?",2.8010283159463505,4.8581124262295114,4.5977496274217575,81.85313710879286,76.37704918032787,7.387183308494784,25.845007451564822,8.296473431620573,1.800957377049181,484,18,94,9,11,164,83,122,0.049,0.809,0.14300000000000002,0.8195,1,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,2,4,2,2,4,0,0,3,0,13,3,2,0,1,23,20,13,0,2,9,0,3,2,0,2,1,3,0,1,6,1,0,0,6,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,2,6,15,4,9,14,2,7,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,4,5,63,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947454150761556,0.13471706789488533,0.0,0.0,0.11010024743593044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13776834856412618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17496066763502965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164329115397044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18212016780969728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455905265877629,0.2313284484471937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377154290602622,0.0,0.17751933979322748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201375381319428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031037885394805,0.0,0.17234978025813902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182769868325216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15819619743971686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901804244068298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107024400427704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224382301967824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471453690241308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5528464689238248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16202088909539414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16012716025864104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415112007323591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037415227285361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358772624561732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Geckos,2020/01/18,"I'm going to break if nothing changes for the better soon. My life hasn't been going the way I'd imagined for a year now. I am stuck in a country where I can't work, with someone who takes all of the money I try to save up to get a work visa or more recently, a phone, and spends it on beer or other unnecessary things. If we needed rent money, I'd get that. But that's not what's going on. 

Anyway, I'm at wits end lately and this morning is one more straw on my invisible camel's back and I can see the poor thing about to invert entirely where the hump used to be. ""If you don't clean this up I'm going to throw it away,"" is probably the worst thing you can say to someone that doesn't have much of anything anymore. I haven't been able to buy new socks or underwear for a year now, and when the animals that live in the same house as you have a knack for destroying all of your belongings because you haven't lived with dogs or cats in over ten years and don't know what they'll get into (the cats destroyed my discount bag of bread and ate the toppings off my pizza??? But left my wife's alone because she just eats cheese.. Its never been an issue in the past, probably because we never get toppings because it's expensive or I'd have put the pizza in the oven) and before you convinced the person you live with to crate their animals at night, they destroyed plenty of your clothes but hey.. Its your fault for not putting them elsewhere and you know it... 

But there's very few places the animals can't get to and if you try to use one of the spare rooms to protect your stuff, you get accused of trying to take it over for yourself.. I just. I can't believe someone would threaten to throw your shit away when they know you lost everything to be with them and when you barely have enough belongings to fill a BACKPACK, it hurts. All because you stupidly said that if they weren't going to clean up things that have been in the same messy pile for months into a bag and put away instead of stepping in cat puke because you didn't notice it in the pile of clothes you had to step on to get to something. I dunno. I know I'm far from perfect, I've always been annoying, but now I'm self loathing and know I've ruined my life for a relationship that doesn't seem to be getting better. 

Part of me wants to disappear and start over, but the rest of me knows I'd be homeless for a while in order to save up enough money to be able to afford first and last month's rent.  Life is awful when you have no control over it.",6.104554210041782,4.9544696558317405,6.223717867006588,84.94233411231501,66.59082217973231,9.124821188301114,30.651441116068266,7.793537801064563,1.7730567098647407,1982,59,435,18,27,632,229,523,0.138,0.82,0.042,-0.9940000000000001,4,1,2,0,0,0,44.0,2,20,7,10,17,17,6,0,30,1,37,11,1,3,6,67,74,36,0,8,20,1,0,0,0,2,3,2,6,2,28,22,6,2,8,1,11,14,17,11,0,4,12,3,47,6,81,55,14,80,0,3,1,1,39,37,1,12,26,292,75,2,0.1531913857761443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933003777970839,0.0,0.0,0.0637337524359007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596234546831616,0.0,0.0,0.06303172887088668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21589252453310906,0.058897359860967675,0.0,0.2801521406943041,0.0,0.06517729310839797,0.08629711637726831,0.0,0.13548533175308106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810280868491453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590858263793705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837651596019035,0.0,0.0,0.06784104909270097,0.15828765214541948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06883926984901068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515225724166633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32014470530702666,0.0,0.21765548708363344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838114565825296,0.08199727342648214,0.0,0.0,0.07994600318938333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525699379651701,0.062435712794725935,0.0864032778512936,0.0,0.08322144443886308,0.0,0.1623054092717948,0.0,0.0,0.20290620035494167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361324692153249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227590259544685,0.0,0.05630664748611265,0.05679473573600501,0.1181506406599321,0.0739765974892731,0.0,0.0718798690409199,0.0,0.07349563312336617,0.08720470402590437,0.0,0.0,0.1038064476261408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294567120199968,0.07311925584496994,0.0,0.0668804045962631,0.08002619650583223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516622379617832,0.0,0.0,0.2309994816745355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562900615372929,0.0822351090239393,0.0,0.0,0.07286004417373645,0.06091196931059579,0.0,0.0,0.061036850354004815,0.06972984207226278,0.07990601258216426,0.0,0.0786243780399228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19469784606493554,0.058967106512216184,0.0,0.0,0.05421482566204519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768374299787488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518085720046982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20354709944690924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15601034279301218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230817169587245,0.0,0.06319946838255297,0.04517812419135744,0.06079809577851444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11152515334563194,0.0,0.0,0.05441138258989671,0.0,0.0,0.14797534479444585
mentalhealth,CuddlesWithSatan,2020/01/18,"I feel trapped, literally. I live in a small town with a bunch of crime / pedophilia / rape / racism and all around terrible things. I've been trying to get out since I graduated, but every time I'm almost able to afford leaving, something happens and I'm back to square one. First it was a car wreck, then it was a friend moving in with someone else when we planned to rent together, and now my car officially stopped working. Am I doomed to live a long and miserable life in a town that I personally don't feel safe going outside in? I just want to live somewhere that isn't here.",4.576315789473681,5.693877289473683,5.183289473684212,83.28177631578949,69.96491228070175,8.50701754385965,30.03947368421053,8.841846274778883,2.2457578947368417,457,18,93,8,8,147,79,114,0.257,0.696,0.047,-0.9765,2,1,1,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,3,6,6,1,1,6,0,6,2,0,0,1,18,14,7,0,1,2,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,5,9,0,2,2,0,1,4,2,4,0,2,3,3,8,2,15,11,2,21,1,2,1,1,3,9,0,1,8,55,13,2,0.19959640147684016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19986696443859706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776831142088766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534773123850974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673718178306338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816857676644506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20184387557505687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697765971323313,0.0,0.0,0.1542076846607254,0.0,0.10428088173397923,0.0,0.11343523466016532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765024386487311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21134376971871613,0.0,0.0,0.1409808411299534,0.0,0.0,0.5287418378389245,0.17663653437454105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121393871635252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525168723617811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17427987897747732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651082058739434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16911738325652215,0.15365906125477088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16687152896987484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132602980170241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638626681288733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355128547508822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772712895548408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14530855745680807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,someone031197,2020/01/18,"I need an advice For the past two month (almost) i've been seeing a consultant at a mental  health service in my area for university students, i was very emotionally overwhelmed and extremely lonely ( i still am but a little better) and i used it as a way to vent and express what i am feeling, on our last session she sent to me to a psychiatrist office , because the first place is just for initial diagnosis (i guess i am not really sure, my head is just to confused, i don't know...) and i don't want to go, i feel stupid, i feel like i don't really havr any serious problems and just wasting everybody's time, i am fine but overreacting, i really don't want to go, but also feel if like it's better to just a professional point of view, i hate the feeling that i get after a consultation when i feel like being judged, what do you recommend?",11.04741617357002,6.111491739644972,11.454171597633135,63.10973865877711,60.59763313609467,14.816962524654837,42.36785009861933,12.161744961471696,4.878431163708086,660,24,130,15,6,230,101,169,0.16699999999999998,0.695,0.138,-0.7259,0,2,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,1,0,3,7,14,2,2,11,0,14,2,1,1,1,30,32,12,0,5,9,0,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,7,0,0,3,5,7,0,2,3,8,23,7,16,28,0,19,0,2,2,0,7,7,0,4,11,88,28,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395793948133043,0.0,0.0,0.14303137237680322,0.0,0.0,0.11422729596868185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971345671793663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707256578908365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526567621426529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067324176653433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4333383449903125,0.3061299484717542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149771601079826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462682824532749,0.0,0.1623559684803511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735188377940526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102270497567254,0.14659273877960505,0.15182984739296235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849989111385784,0.11643182942883655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20934992689281345,0.14316094894413514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14394685481588018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11401172819999188,0.0,0.0,0.10591238071408662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635479348966675,0.0,0.0,0.14923504584691294,0.0,0.13502784169008036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366764347737638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745165580141908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382319238759807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407041056209452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462288766271366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328983989334718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953172526892374,0.0,0.0,0.12336595346947267,0.0,0.11785610179391012,0.16849880987367413,0.1133779563077243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,a_tall_boi,2020/01/18,"I’m only 19 but I feel like I’ve hit a slump. A few months ago I secured a union plumbing apprenticeship. I love my job and my coworkers. The banter on the site is great. I make good money with union rates as an apprentice, let alone eventually becoming fully qualified.  

This sounds really stupid but I feel like “I’m set”, even though I’m only 19. As long as I budget well, money in the future shouldn’t be an issue and I should be able to live comfortably. 

I kind of feel like if (and hopefully when) I get a girlfriend, I’ll have the world at my feet. I know there are still heaps more things to experience like moving out, starting a family, travelling etc but that’s all five years minimum down the line. 

I occasionally have dark days but I think my mental health is pretty good. I just feel like I’ve hit a wall in my life and not sure how to overcome it. 

Sounds dumb but I wanted to vent.  Cheers for reading",1.9378618618618613,4.077046140540542,3.535090090090093,88.02359609609613,79.48648648648648,7.13813813813814,20.007507507507512,8.167268648758528,0.8830120120120126,716,18,152,14,18,237,118,185,0.069,0.6579999999999999,0.273,0.9927,3,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,8,18,2,0,13,0,10,4,1,2,2,28,27,16,0,5,8,0,4,5,1,2,2,2,0,0,4,6,0,1,6,2,3,2,2,2,1,1,0,6,19,16,16,20,4,21,0,0,0,1,2,9,1,2,14,86,23,4,0.13678427197626333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12125100401624996,0.0,0.0,0.14166725378936632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106748180332308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821453954420401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15255062054289792,0.09034472159712882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13380126483674926,0.12894803813076314,0.0,0.2766489512748577,0.3908748449225295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146413654496804,0.0,0.0,0.22945631529572386,0.0,0.15080514274473056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14539528478984612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585764558190452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427672422736805,0.1357372837770323,0.0,0.0,0.14243977033240116,0.0751730586604035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13987118551369138,0.09661477648834016,0.3341294302357416,0.0,0.1207830181590736,0.12104977634897544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345314587310953,0.0,0.09130456369143476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13784637414795714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917990089337808,0.1453800339883404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080612051466152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391587794332911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682128774285984,0.0,0.08762750718945407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681661172958336,0.0,0.10923609629169112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289175575622622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087339235709574,0.08764583837556003,0.13438985272499676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067890756988458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229854876373363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808458650419669
mentalhealth,juandaor,2020/01/18,"What are your thoughts on an end-to-end online therapy platform? Hi all,

I'm a product manager based in San Francisco, and I've been supporting my partner as she struggles with depression and anxiety for several years now. In hopes of starting a new personal project, I've been looking for potential ways to help make mental health treatment more accessible. I would really appreciate your feedback on my ideas so far.

From my research, more than half of people with mental health illnesses are not getting help - even people who have health insurance.

There seem to be two major barriers that cause this:

1. There is a shortage of available and affordable care providers
   1. 51% of counties in the US have zero psychiatrists
   2. 40% of psychiatrists don’t take insurance
2. Getting insurance coverage very difficult
   1. Therapist directories are out often of date (those provided by insurance carriers)
   2. Mental health claims are rejected 2X more often as physical health claims
   3. The appeal process is too complicated for most patients to complete

I think there might be an opportunity to eliminate these barriers by providing an end-to-end online therapy solution, primarily based on video. That is, a marketplace for patients to quickly connect with their ideal therapist and book video-based therapy sessions that are covered by insurance.

1. Value proposition for patients:
   1. Faster access to therapists that match their requirements and are available due to a significantly wider selection, as patients are unconstrained by geographic location (statewide).
   2. More therapists accepting insurance since they will be provided tools to easily process insurance claims on their behalf

I am looking for any kind of feedback, tips, stories and opinions from anyone who's interested in the mental health space. It would be really helpful if you told me a little about your background (e.g. are you going to therapy, are you thinking of starting therapy, have you tried online therapy before...). If you are curious to see a prototype, I can show it to you via DM. Thanks!",7.940822129160239,10.28229212893983,7.902879656160457,62.31086345602822,63.2406876790831,12.475247961207847,41.21677319814856,11.95083700844419,6.228593475865107,1679,97,233,62,26,540,195,349,0.052000000000000005,0.8270000000000001,0.121,0.9737,1,1,0,0,0,0,55.0,1,9,4,3,11,13,0,1,13,0,29,7,0,2,1,34,49,12,0,6,3,0,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,2,12,10,0,3,6,3,0,2,2,4,0,3,4,3,23,9,48,37,7,25,0,2,3,0,24,13,0,9,9,153,35,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05023776034814187,0.0,0.05651442823119261,0.0,0.0,0.0516553511530328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06286246797720793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07532082644845496,0.07589031781711826,0.0,0.0,0.07745688206172828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06362871684128096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26172647391400256,0.0,0.0,0.048793961308994944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771936257461824,0.0,0.041985054715613986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4711561522441958,0.0,0.0,0.14855123727276218,0.0,0.0,0.07337487553080545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833962598415304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692979201877563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404249231879838,0.0,0.0,0.12407334900284217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04931235903256263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29779584364669376,0.07837005485036705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713492578312222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102431709514608,0.0645050920608666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465286117040357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058869076450090825,0.06725332942307466,0.0,0.0834580995342045,0.0,0.06111043961236401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10457868314359624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723053905154073,0.0,0.0,0.0838328534524098,0.0,0.0,0.055545057197373536,0.0,0.0,0.068014481995049,0.5068972957132988,0.34309982641553205,0.0,0.09467266202140602,0.0,0.058648763165227887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059104740354709,0.0,0.050156502416817496,0.0,0.07216546671875222,0.0,0.08886293065705418,0.0,0.0,0.06095488732199132,0.0,0.058638801439571224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495783523763044,0.0,0.0,0.04757329293647613
mentalhealth,GodlyPumpkin,2020/01/18,"Do you feel like if our eyes were open to everything we experience and their gravity that we would not survive I feel like if we were truly aware of the severity and meaning behind each and everything we experience, hear, witness that we would all go completely mad. I feel like disassociation changes the perspective of what we experience; like moving away from a more literal and narrow lens of our physical sensations and emotions into a more focused yet distanced lens from the self that allows you to see all the details and meaning behind everything. 

Like this
physical sensations/emotions:   .
Spirituality/deep thought:  o
Existentialism/out of body experience:   O

Essentially: .oO like a telescope with multiple lenses but in this case with your perception, possibly the opening of the mind’s eye.

Maybe I’m just rambling, this probably won’t make any sense to me later, but maybe that’s what BPD is, being trapped in the middle lens, experiencing things more deeply than you would experience them with typical sensation and emotions, and being “out of body”.",13.904543325526928,10.860180453551918,12.660359094457455,50.85737704918034,53.20765027322404,16.577361436377828,50.186572989851676,14.554592549557764,7.252260577673693,865,44,130,28,7,280,106,183,0.038,0.882,0.08,0.3716,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,8,4,2,1,2,7,1,0,10,0,10,4,4,2,2,43,21,12,0,5,6,0,3,6,0,4,0,1,0,1,10,22,0,0,7,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,3,8,17,6,22,12,6,13,0,0,3,0,16,9,0,2,8,90,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07083368241576328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978635594814714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314008391671381,0.13118830104929302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101895076846221,0.0,0.10921179899053007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3515044451369972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28084207152095736,0.5094517599380782,0.0,0.0,0.15800220044701346,0.2232399049862496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059197623686348164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173980623039732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053295374839297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952889529068806,0.0,0.20928931253671829,0.2269257498487019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051738533261346,0.0,0.0,0.1107076443045336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742692239216328,0.0,0.0,0.11230417497152703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300357015276963,0.0,0.10866360702631812,0.11767332931368732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920055609990107,0.0,0.0,0.08269293526093112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219809337661875,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,H3d0n1st,2020/01/18,"My girlfriend (19/F/Chicago suburbs) has a laundry list of diagnosed mental health issues and probably can't hold down a job. How can I get her financial help? My girlfriend (19/F/Chicago suburbs) has a laundry list of diagnosed mental health issues: schizophrenia, psychosis, bipolar, PTSD, depression, anxiety, alcoholism, bulimia, and probably a few more I've forgotten to list. She self-harms, has been suicidal, and has been in and out of mental health facilities since her early teens. She was homeless and/or couch surfing with friends for a good part of last year until she met me and now we live together. I can't afford to support her on my own for much longer, but I don't think she's capable of holding down a job. The only job she's ever had was for a few months at McDonald's when she was 17, so as I understand it she wouldn't qualify for disability. What else can we do? 

She DOES currently have health insurance (she's still listed on her mom's plan for now), but she's very resistant to going back to therapy or getting on any medicine. I'm not sure if the meds would help or not. She claims they don't. 

Thanks in advance.",6.392255005268705,6.660341945205481,6.821095890410959,76.16355110642783,65.62100456621005,10.756726378644187,35.567615033368455,10.560738912317856,3.8051929048120834,902,41,168,22,13,294,128,219,0.08900000000000001,0.865,0.046,-0.7879,5,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,2,0,1,2,8,6,0,0,9,0,20,8,0,1,2,25,29,15,1,3,7,1,0,0,3,2,8,0,1,0,2,9,1,2,2,0,0,2,7,1,0,0,7,0,26,5,26,20,6,23,0,1,0,0,25,9,0,3,12,109,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031110022356788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765565539103783,0.0,0.08612147200856513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656514111448785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969628275096442,0.2285275660122273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851732048472928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404404759100013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183278523877116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869770898131151,0.0,0.117634184526177,0.0,0.06398038213670028,0.09442465773447588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47865843168601496,0.0,0.0,0.15091663755065268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350033028293557,0.3351473646546235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176568018358516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994079865277088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504821304238345,0.0,0.34035489540789104,0.0,0.0,0.1318493961262045,0.08985827877567551,0.0,0.08275740876713351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856202543759659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12191045149369185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24275515072346315,0.0,0.1315970618408205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744287471288095,0.0,0.0,0.0931252633925171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899045292460112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314150241824127,0.12775160198851568,0.1061029523906772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364622788629176,0.12874217148408187,0.0,0.0,0.07213511016070671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171971377521916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288821963855047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997181916553585,0.0,0.0,0.07249621281176921
mentalhealth,CaramelNesquik,2020/01/18,"How do I retrain my brain? I wish I was different and didn't overreact to each thing someone does. 
I wish I didn't think everyone was going to leave me if they did something without me. 
I wish it didn't take me 20 minutes to leave the house each morning cause my OCD is out of control. 
Lastly, I wish i wasn't so convinced I'd take my  own life at 30 years of age, I'm currently 26F and been dealing with mental health illness for 10 years.
How do I retrain my brain?",2.1702272727272707,3.5459356565656566,3.658472222222226,90.87437500000004,76.27272727272728,6.566161616161617,27.52651515151515,7.1686216300943375,1.2656151515151517,366,15,81,4,8,121,61,99,0.079,0.7859999999999999,0.135,0.745,2,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,11,5,2,4,0,17,20,6,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,8,0,17,1,10,12,3,8,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,5,50,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31977095504760034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471306172778739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606380216824473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765777188368506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963871472127882,0.0,0.0,0.12533638673700434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685677801223795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139756420100552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522405349981723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16526139713426544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674676822393774,0.0,0.3033073121539158,0.0,0.0,0.10116342687848257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433621955606085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135332643661285,0.1102609197311747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153734175123186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515173679490076,0.0917722286795262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6588026479720194,0.13806293427652322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844632663827376
mentalhealth,queenofneverlandx,2020/01/18,"Adult ADHD Hi, I’m 20F and ive never been tested for ADHD, however, my poor university marks and consistent zoning out and forgetfulness is making me think that I might have ADD/ADHD. I constantly fidget and cut people off when they’re talking (like I don’t want to cut them off I just blurt it out), I’m also always energetic but I can never concentrate my energy into a studious task or any task that requires too much mental thinking. Is it possible to develop it in your adulthood? Also what should I do to get tested? I have no idea what to do, and I’m growing more worrisome due to my lack of concentration in studying. 

Thanks guys :)",2.4814523076923045,4.970794536000007,4.7744,77.95858461538464,79.64,7.686153846153848,24.01538461538461,8.617729084823388,2.1035723076923083,507,18,90,12,13,176,85,125,0.135,0.765,0.1,-0.5378,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,1,5,4,2,0,1,0,12,0,0,1,2,23,21,10,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,7,8,0,1,3,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,1,0,14,2,14,18,3,13,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,2,6,65,21,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.643538939537124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28548035124995835,0.14851983800898125,0.0,0.0,0.1213808403749705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19288669521350504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325482565037496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767353748904649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20149600685908706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720228989735747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914495269624628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987819078476275,0.1893520541530655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121233010525904,0.0,0.2753284302398298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123744041292516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012231757053942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434652971091511,0.0,0.16433166855004314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22874123362704504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527934461725562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garblefeef,2020/01/18,"Trying to not overthink... Does anyone have any advice on how to keep myself from overthinking in delicate situations? I’m not necessarily diagnosed with anything.. but one of my biggest issues that I face on a daily basis is overthinking and beating myself up about mishappenings. I can’t keep living like this. I feel the years being taken off my life with every overthinking breakdown that I have. I just... lose control of my thoughts and my mind starts to race to the point where I end up screaming into my pillow in frustration. I tried to take up hobbies but in the moment of any of my breakdowns so I can take my mind off of things... but there’s only so many situations where I can just stop everything and occupy myself. I need ways to cope... it’s affecting my close to one year relationship with my girlfriend. I can’t just keep doing this. I love her and my family too much to keep on thinking the way I do. Any replies will be very much appreciated, I need help.",5.247555831265508,6.504198586021509,6.103978494623657,76.78366004962781,68.51612903225806,9.163937138130684,28.82382133995037,9.466822959209583,2.5856332506203468,771,27,141,16,13,254,108,186,0.092,0.8059999999999999,0.102,0.4343,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,3,11,5,1,0,5,0,12,4,1,3,0,32,27,10,0,2,8,0,1,1,1,1,2,1,1,0,6,9,0,6,3,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,2,2,28,2,30,22,2,25,0,1,0,1,5,17,0,0,7,104,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493669331313602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608337350801286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893979487723422,0.0,0.10521231168857337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433982652092698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976833370687035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188522018289047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324000991693975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077218576725793,0.0,0.1149062360419123,0.0,0.12052864339005626,0.0,0.0646464329271665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569732275774578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344555125636295,0.0,0.4545672892019816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030651501470983,0.062462628399460124,0.0,0.112896741465015,0.0,0.0,0.1430350569734518,0.0,0.0,0.1153925287272034,0.0,0.0,0.1296231044121334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581906240104439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18797366505946436,0.18960309499892847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17327331041953467,0.09723814011420392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086262494928272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726651763104025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874247670708883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049517184243663,0.0,0.0,0.10689102232376907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19225942974142665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494000265398402,0.08192318511645631,0.0,0.10150118057417253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736078967065641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549230181576906,0.0,0.20296788039000888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646665721917959
mentalhealth,iamanalteredbeast,2020/01/18,"When I was a kid I planned on killing myself in front of my parents. Hello. I was born into a family with a brother who was violently sexually abusive. It started when I was 4 and continued up until I was 13. At the same time I was abused by other pedophile who was not violent but still obviously abusive from the ages of 10 to 13. I told my parents about the second abuser and they put him in jail and rallied around me with total support. I told my parents about my brother who was 20 at this time now and they bullied me into lying to the police so that my brother wouldn’t get into trouble. It worked my brother got away with his crimes. I had been suicidally depressed since I was 7 and resented my parents for what they have done to me and for having put me in this situation to smile and be polite and nice to my brother during family events and holidays so they and he could pretend everything was okay. I hated them for what they had done to me and I hated life and wanted to die. So at 13 I made a plan to kill myself but to punish my parents by making them watch me die. That’s it. That’s all I had to say I guess.
I didn’t do it obviously I grew up and got away from my home. But I still think about it all the time and look back in horror in how awful my life was at the time that I even considered that.",3.8479710144927566,4.255120608695656,5.482028985507249,83.0694927536232,71.17391304347827,8.162318840579712,27.65217391304348,8.167268648758528,1.6733347826086962,1032,34,219,14,18,353,131,276,0.265,0.679,0.055999999999999994,-0.9974,5,0,0,0,2,2,15.0,0,0,7,3,15,13,8,0,10,2,24,2,0,3,5,39,39,24,5,3,4,10,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,18,21,0,0,1,2,0,4,3,10,0,1,23,3,47,3,44,13,4,38,0,1,2,0,28,18,0,1,16,177,65,1,0.0,0.4452435661840207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363204081679236,0.0,0.0,0.17653110553241505,0.07223883322279602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750084007715337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091572930050513,0.0,0.1950026586274087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922791716946369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205058283080836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443279198831019,0.0,0.17712824345362616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049083014986640514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502747256798225,0.0,0.10349233715696918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18550485675266265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423570421297872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20787511461632247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271396679715508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889115182350864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889417134857615,0.06270982180265239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5215807181771329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18888376967015755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470979348967892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771327216048514,0.1055994713878409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664956079262039,0.0,0.15005112243939106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276190093921153,0.10660904090467503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06019693522494805,0.0,0.0,0.21912315213401887,0.0,0.0,0.17953925102694396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05541190617851605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839395663659459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gaybrouha,2020/01/18,"#lgbtqmh 

Research shows that LGBTQ+ youth are more than two-and-a-half times more likely to have a mental health problem as those who identify as heterosexual.

Last year, the Anna Freud Centre launched www.onmymind.info, a free website to support young people aged up to 25 with their mental health and wellbeing.  On My Mind was co-produced with young people including those from the LGBTQI+ community.  This short, anonymous survey will help us develop On My Mind to more effectively support LGBTQ+ young people who may be struggling or worrying about their mental health or wellbeing.

http://survey.constantcontact.com/survey/a07eguicohok558kza7/a01hik5htkbqw/questions",13.514833333333335,15.64511735,9.436,57.09633333333335,50.5,11.066666666666668,38.66666666666667,10.864195022040775,4.571866666666667,565,22,71,11,6,157,71,100,0.073,0.778,0.149,0.8016,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,2,1,1,6,0,1,4,0,6,3,0,2,0,11,8,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,5,5,14,4,3,12,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,3,9,41,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5016264865808406,0.0,0.0,0.10543883717451834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128225313896733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685172294029273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4755820826768433,0.0,0.31766825717509234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3271683388630636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15052051348092724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16445029435205066,0.0,0.0,0.35701777032581977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172634250551426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366501891216774,0.0,0.1892196439777004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15975178979096066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129985006939757
mentalhealth,BigCatRich01,2020/01/18,"Plz help: What amount of Zoloft works with 54 mg Concerta? Hey all!  I need your help.  I recently quit taking Zoloft completely because my dosage was too high and it was interfering with my Concerta.  I did this without consulting my psychiatrist (of course).  I, myself, did not notice any problems with quitting, but soon my wife, and parents pointed out that I was drinking too much, being irresponsible.  I have resolved to talk to my psychiatrist when I go back to get more Concerta about getting back on Zoloft, but my last dosage was way too high.  50 something, I remember, and it was stopping my Concerta from working.  What is the best dose for 54 mg of Concerta for ADHD.

Thanks,

Richard",5.430959999999999,7.562441576000001,5.616199999999999,77.06110000000002,69.24000000000001,9.16,33.3,9.642632912329526,3.4399599999999997,547,26,95,13,10,173,80,125,0.043,0.818,0.139,0.8938,1,0,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,6,8,4,0,0,1,0,10,5,0,0,1,17,16,6,0,2,4,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,7,1,1,2,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,7,0,17,3,16,8,5,14,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,7,67,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20202794455743084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431626052300885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585226925297458,0.0,0.10247443731098584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17641443111394262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17625350030947398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646775994443082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17565445932230178,0.0,0.09553718994800753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253526938489604,0.35522151502468946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702692803046515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12357554014131596,0.12464674171004644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19138714315254848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18665923246418106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891230461756534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16085250985987395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3575978919286911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598209453161025,0.0,0.1904286889285496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941441842394982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14054219579895513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263930395252032,0.13511536276793198,0.0,0.1547672744406309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343286913408248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204593965715425,0.0,0.24476294859196984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trossymour,2020/01/18,"Do I have a bad memory? I’m new to reddit and am not sure if this is the appropriate sub for this, so apologies if this isn’t the place for this. 

I recently got together with a group of friends from high school and, over drinks, the old days were the primary topic of discussion. I’m not sure if these guys have superhuman memories or if mine may be deficient. So many vividly recalled stories, many of which I had no recollection of(many of the stories involved me or were about something we’d done when we were young and wild). People were mentioned that I had no memory of. 
It’s not like I have no memories from that time, and there were lots of things that I did remember once they were mentioned. But it’s fair to say that I remembered much less than anyone else. 
One story in particular involved me stepping in to defend someone who was being bullied and standing up to an older, bigger kid after football practice and as the situation escalated I had to be restrained from getting into a fight. 
My friend is like, you don’t remember that??
I don’t. 
Seems like something that a person would remember right?

I’m now 40 years old and am a former college football player. I was never knocked unconscious while playing, but have learned in recent years that you don’t always lose consciousness when you are concussed. I played linebacker and there were many times when I’ve “had my bell rung” and have seen spots in my vision etc. My dad, who is now 71, played linebacker in the NFL for years and in the past year has been diagnosed with dementia and it’s likely that he has CTE. (He’s being evaluated by the NFL doctors and is part of the class-action suit against the NFL.)
Obviously this has heightened my awareness of memory lately. 

I’m not a person who spends a lot of time in the past, and I know that high school for many people is the best time of their life(not me. Not that it was bad.it was fine)and for this reason many of their best and most vivid memories are from this period. My friend with the most stories has a nearly photographic memory of those days, but I’m also pretty sure he’d say that was the best time of his life.  Meanwhile, I don’t really even remember my teachers from school save for a few(I would recognize them if I saw them) but I’m awful with names. 

I’m wondering if anyone can relate to this(how can you not remember that??)
 
Thanks for reading",5.330573942186845,6.318746030303036,5.674639016897082,80.92251152073733,68.13419913419914,8.991593352883674,29.838290741516552,9.19923166143015,2.4505206535400084,1894,69,363,35,31,605,216,462,0.068,0.831,0.1,0.9751,0,0,3,0,1,0,50.0,2,4,5,4,12,21,1,0,25,1,54,4,0,1,5,66,69,34,0,8,18,1,0,4,3,3,3,2,0,4,30,20,1,1,13,5,1,1,15,3,0,1,22,6,38,18,52,38,11,49,0,1,4,0,37,16,0,15,35,257,68,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609359034982191,0.05836486410095041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809168521522788,0.07187012393794935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713349023596176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22083327110510328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047328151115604,0.0,0.0,0.07119399670620358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179466368723299,0.0,0.07178097304015671,0.0,0.06871375305182044,0.0,0.0,0.058595746073569814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822834709783377,0.04632900354259743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16257767289234878,0.0,0.03664699139728945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05610002340644134,0.0,0.0,0.06945291804512158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14822054453347008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038548936112902894,0.0,0.07912472397948403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908860734898364,0.13707393887254782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847243687386914,0.0,0.1192666903453278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4266859227495835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05156341346466715,0.0,0.05409885517483503,0.06774485879290619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720723698100066,0.07470035014919149,0.04753093123298782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595838378315645,0.1339194780613731,0.0972570971011071,0.12249288880968776,0.07328484366704059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136097683822368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016230514061535,0.0,0.04493560906759402,0.07211901876926463,0.1385161393310945,0.0,0.4767522704668822,0.059902014893809225,0.0,0.11156157216726552,0.0,0.21296636404436375,0.0,0.06385584718899873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884403434796812,0.0,0.0,0.05943221026020928,0.10799951443226607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983277564672311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457854809823924,0.0,0.0,0.046600107256000785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20450567964773586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606744207131164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965560881098498,0.0,0.0,0.1806800020215392
mentalhealth,samia_3,2020/01/18,"YouthDale Phsyc Ward Horror stories (Toronto) Thought I'd take a chance here & see if anyone has heard of Youthdale Crisis centre in Toronto? 
They are notoriously horrible! Children are shipped off to this centre Globally - Youthdale has been sued countless times, criticized for using illegal methods and tactics, controversial tactics (like military style tactics against children as young as 6 YEARS OLD!), and just filled with horror stories in general. 

I was kidnapped & brought to this facility in my childhood & suffer PTSD years later. 
They really *should* have been shut down by now. This is the kind of facility one would expect to find in a movie - Not in Canadian society in 2020! 

I wanted to see if anyone else had any stories to share from youthdale (or perhaps similar facilities). 
I've met alot of children who had also been locked in youthdale in their childhood & all have equally horrifying stories and experiences too.",9.0896875,10.46302859375,8.276250000000001,64.22375000000001,59.9375,10.65,43.5,10.577609850970193,5.2565125,765,44,106,17,10,239,108,160,0.175,0.8009999999999999,0.024,-0.9814,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,3,0,5,4,0,0,4,0,15,0,0,1,1,19,24,9,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,3,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,10,3,6,3,25,12,3,23,0,1,2,0,10,12,0,4,10,69,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081016915818844,0.0,0.7089299870617642,0.0,0.11123601461531604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22874966383849005,0.167601021990438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13664519257962346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16000688226724016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495037874187674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17033728036545046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991405532822203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17164352870537342,0.0,0.11084206084970454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912093994120304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478977342509976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606948002065806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298738541285577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12985958433273978,0.0953813880755292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127552530112775,0.0,0.0,0.0964802573483483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11619836566735815,0.0,0.0,0.21067274781791892
mentalhealth,b1uem00n,2020/01/18,"I feel crazy. I don’t even know where to begin.  I have always been anxious. When I went to a check up did a superficial screening. It said moderate/severe anxiety and mild depression. It felt right to hear that, because I always knew I had a lot of noise in my head. I started seeing a therapist and after a couple of sessions I felt like she wasn’t too great. Lately, I have days where I feel like I want to just sleep. I stay up later so I can sleep all day and not have to deal with anyone. I have random panic attacks where I feel super down and numb and just lay down. The last one it felt like everything around me was almost fake in the sense that it was more vivid. and more dimensional. I just slept it off and felt a slight bit better when I woke. I also lately have been struggling with feeling like I can’t feel and I make it up. I was bullied when I was younger and always put up a facade and faked to be someone I wasn’t. I feel like maybe that could be why but I don’t know. I just know I feel like i’m not my own person. I feel like everything is fake or made up. I feel out of touch with reality, and myself. I just want advice or want to know if anyone else has felt like this?",0.8689723320158079,2.7962712015810283,2.6753770750988157,93.90628300395258,82.04347826086956,5.470924901185772,18.02513833992095,6.55674776486733,-0.19645378656126544,926,20,211,9,25,307,125,253,0.096,0.774,0.13,0.7172,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,16,19,1,2,9,0,24,5,4,2,1,56,57,20,0,5,11,0,15,8,0,0,1,2,0,1,10,16,0,0,19,0,1,2,7,8,0,1,21,20,35,11,26,33,6,31,0,1,3,0,5,16,0,6,20,142,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331273015274789,0.0,0.0,0.08537316088914561,0.0,0.0,0.06818046387037183,0.21282343401361425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522182294197063,0.0963168090213266,0.0,0.11922817844413418,0.08735647616690767,0.0,0.0758973307031897,0.0,0.09699281673931898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05197223549361498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540340991524155,0.09307920668965064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807124809193232,0.0943359016406657,0.0,0.10996818465061824,0.08789683157744381,0.07343223728407587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122177637786366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05631183407029713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15324804878954254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3879791925875482,0.30454019643343105,0.40930328257797133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399679389192583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749888409125975,0.0,0.09609150019256192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18742136700439546,0.06949631497808177,0.1923485500176574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3332204153303577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248295412467087,0.0,0.08067279304123126,0.056910103319376966,0.0,0.08565270849126523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05777274942548124,0.0,0.0,0.10003141201780764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07444363899495783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570742619162894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280951596714473,0.08109949182229348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793926084287895,0.0,0.0,0.0963168090213266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706383238988228,0.0,0.07223847928278322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06034576097623332,0.09087324699016966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912974441016018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899063314571226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086140647953122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903464003138852,0.07693171394886575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BodyElectricxxiiii,2020/01/18,"Winehour Like so many of us millennials, I’m going to use this platform to scream into the void as a poor method of emotional release. 

I just wanna start out by saying I have everything I ever wanted or desired. I got out of my hometown. I met the love of my life. I got a dream job. We got married. We travel. I get paid to do what I love. On the outside I should be happy all of the time, I should be content, I should be vibing. I should be THRIVING. Instead I’m stuck in this black nothingness. I swim in the black nothingness because I have to and because everyone tells me I have to, that things will be better when I make it out of the nothingness. They can all see the brightness at the end, the light streams filtering out. All I see is black. 

Why can’t you see the light? It’s so obvious that it’s there, at this point we don’t know what else to do to make you see the light. It’s like you aren’t even trying. 

The immense guilt I feel for seeing nothing but black is almost as bad as the nothingness itself. It is void of all light and color. It is cold. It whispers to you all of the time that you are nothing and will never be anything. That everyone secretly hates you. That everyone is unhappy because you are here. It starts to tell you to give up. 

Swimming in the dark like that for years and years and feeling so lost because you can’t see, it’s a miracle anyone makes it out. I always say that no things might not get better but they get EASIER. Well it’s not easier. It’s never fucking easy. There is always some hurdle or emotional vibe check every 5 fucking seconds and second guessing anything I feel. Wondering constantly if I’m over reacting. White knuckling it to keep my emotions under control. Always too worried about how I’m gonna survive the day to actually live it. And that’s why people with mental health struggle so fucking bad.",2.21404337492573,4.383259195187165,3.669153297682712,87.26033125371363,78.70588235294117,6.508496732026145,25.094771241830074,7.594959193182576,1.3720489601901371,1465,55,290,22,36,482,177,374,0.109,0.782,0.11,-0.5551,2,0,2,0,0,0,40.0,4,9,2,5,16,20,4,2,19,0,31,7,0,7,9,59,74,21,0,8,8,0,3,3,0,8,2,4,0,0,30,17,0,2,6,4,3,4,13,10,1,2,7,25,39,10,44,53,6,34,0,1,13,5,24,17,3,8,16,207,69,1,0.0,0.0,0.08131576294890114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344060144176738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20800583169289727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058264627984798985,0.0,0.13714310639422606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915020866824532,0.20318303985447309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739306378166006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004758331331084,0.09345904118404696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05373943854920297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696095563854843,0.2811971605770402,0.07380356195428375,0.0,0.0,0.05503712471435497,0.0753746269705167,0.07020713617386794,0.2388694118353797,0.07488951578927952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12639888554839826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23110519974424704,0.1306057684200367,0.0799354715405598,0.047357021863611036,0.0,0.199934193395266,0.0,0.0917947971998764,0.0,0.0,0.08870382930408025,0.0,0.08226879966666255,0.0,0.08857339178642429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268983160895298,0.07406544099478808,0.0,0.0,0.04579469537912256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05885678110282976,0.12212903729755012,0.0,0.07357983860352496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096196966146387,0.0,0.15041290881599698,0.0,0.16686555351679652,0.08448115488690354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397466892679939,0.0883974649107934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12853483612802494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15991024859234548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05776889824090594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877155993667374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253097824678714,0.0,0.0,0.39840807536221945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795947433306835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711214862468936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456640719306729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11071837158736536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717804170096192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056574002288298564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002328990278922,0.0719683324285807,0.0,0.0,0.049148804924567614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749215615643333,0.0,0.15038048058627068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903652782458708,0.0,0.08462326996836272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732054484515516
mentalhealth,lonelyanxiousfreak,2020/01/18,"Criticized by people online I know I am a shitty person. I know I am entitled, whiny, rude, selfish, etc

Just shut the fuck up",-0.030200000000000667,2.2790530800000006,2.895500000000002,85.43525000000002,98.2,5.7,18.25,7.1686216300943375,0.92,97,3,18,2,4,34,20,25,0.494,0.44,0.066,-0.9274,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,5,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5228640680623685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.433421377432628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5153081792783244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250243890147962,0.4093601138705272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Andersssssss,2020/01/18,"I know I’ve been having mental problems but I can’t describe them at all I dunno if this is a rant or what but I was in the middle of typing out a huge long post on here about something or another, but then I realized that it was a terrible description and probably incorrect. I can’t really talk about what I’m feeling to my therapist without feeling like I’m lying. I keep searching for a reason I feel so shitty, or in exactly what way I’m feeling shitty, but I can never find it. And it’s killing me because I just want to know what I’m feeling god damn it. And I probably do I just don’t know I do. I feel like I’m faking it anyway but whenever I say that out loud or type it out it seems like another lie. I’m probably faking right now actually. I don’t know, I just want to know what the fuck is going on inside my brain it all seems so messy",2.7206730769230774,3.423250222826088,5.193043478260872,83.04058528428095,73.94565217391305,8.705016722408027,27.19732441471572,9.057496981413335,2.078642642140468,667,24,145,14,13,238,93,184,0.297,0.627,0.076,-0.9949,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,10,10,3,0,6,0,13,2,1,1,4,45,37,16,1,4,14,0,6,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,16,6,0,1,16,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,3,8,21,3,16,34,2,18,0,0,0,1,3,11,2,8,7,97,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.12779516088833615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27463970795869763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798301839838253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619134457336064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3972948252336905,0.1871114427220501,0.0,0.0,0.11969234392989515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106765491460895,0.0,0.0,0.07442589245649339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116400616620205,0.14488453989832364,0.0,0.3598527672602006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919369554508858,0.0,0.0,0.11589284185492893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197387489051546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10100212718325634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542062543900964,0.0,0.4235814511642455,0.12530818215087866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838944204537145,0.13464562757426465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183657967039937,0.0,0.10414227865254028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23843670548422094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081711209197444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525829223215416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205119390464575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448368692676565,0.10394758704687744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623789421164888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shyfawns_,2020/01/18,"Is this just hyper-sensitivity or something of the sort? I really can’t think of anywhere else to ask this question, or how to really phrase it, so I hope this makes sense. 

Have you ever been drinking from a metal soda can, with a reuseable metal straw, and had it scrape against the side of the can? Or have you ever accidentally scraped your fork on your teeth? Or accidentally scraped your nails on some wood or similar surface. 

They’re all awful sensations yes, so when one of those things (or one of many others) happens to me, that bad sensation just completely consumes me. I feel it for a while. It travels from my hand or my tooth or my ears all the through my body, right down to my core. Sometimes it even feels like it hurts little. An odd pain on the point of a tooth, in my ear, or under the tip of my fingernail. 

So what’s I’m asking is, why do I feel react to these stimuli so strongly? And is there a way to de-sensitise myself?",2.934255319148935,4.7626723723404245,4.119095744680853,86.45875000000002,75.27659574468085,7.0404255319148925,25.04787234042553,7.865858978985527,1.3026851063829792,738,25,152,11,16,241,118,188,0.10400000000000001,0.82,0.076,-0.6742,0,0,2,0,0,0,26.0,0,5,0,1,12,6,0,0,12,2,11,13,7,3,4,29,21,18,0,1,11,0,4,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,15,3,2,0,5,2,0,1,1,3,0,2,2,6,19,3,25,19,3,17,0,1,0,0,8,11,0,13,5,111,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3321334398581862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483195681275131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973147853659752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18624913163503096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17401674203570547,0.0,0.0,0.14839301269404262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732763675655282,0.321365874389541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26945598279387456,0.126903987891092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708391097198635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17643373303549767,0.0,0.0,0.19016420175184312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678451984209537,0.17803905258514802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118574151246758,0.1800961497314452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407430079637768,0.0,0.1890184108970792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679244876792507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19899421895171365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275977644660366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15170112255888232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675372693416865,0.1756876453622714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180142036062002,0.11382268832491535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100007071722115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16028986337016893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,picklethebuckyeyecat,2020/01/18,"How can I talk? I do have stuff I would like to share, yet I’m always afraid that I’ll release too much and get in trouble in one way or another. How can I know I’m safe when it’ll be easy for anyone to find this? Especially since I don’t post a lot and all anyone has to do is scroll down my account a little and know the basics of myself? Anyone could see this even if they didn’t search my account, and I’m too scared to try sharing my issues, maybe that’s actually something that’s better to do with my therapist out of anyone. I’m sorry for wasting your time.",3.336311475409836,3.657848491803282,4.865696721311477,87.33985655737708,72.27868852459017,7.411475409836067,24.26639344262295,7.1686216300943375,0.7983245901639342,444,11,100,4,8,150,79,122,0.079,0.7829999999999999,0.138,0.7987,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,1,1,7,8,0,2,3,0,14,0,0,2,1,18,22,9,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,1,3,0,2,0,2,3,0,1,1,1,12,5,14,17,3,10,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,3,4,66,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.17778634087312434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15159256686877876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19103692345246226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5095521279563294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16112788301751085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454599481872476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033151581313667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16651384692427554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518417595086454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901538724958478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200248292030902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900641920695067,0.18259729475296949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15488722547284764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830293830136704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13392698370898387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234533136033585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17448292964945405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823990303979325,0.0,0.14517790754678878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507053666742841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025496217254393,0.0,0.2039412621988756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20855830961904528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643345250654696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21153089993225355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623357526686887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123691698763312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144610022908478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294190415349746,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pplplsr101,2020/01/18,"I feel better and do better, but I'm way too affected by my boyfriend's mood Hi everyone, 

Here's my story: I started going to therapy in November, my current therapist is my third one but the first two didn't really work for me. But now I've started doing the work too, not just talking about it. In the past month I've been going to the gym 2 times a week (as a start... And I'm not even working out too hard, just building a habit  I think) and I already noticed that when stressed I turn less to my old toxic habits (daydreaming, reading old texts, staying in bed for too long, weed...) and instead I want to move a bit. I have a journal (it's just a phone app) in which I'm writing down a) my successes each week, b) my triggers c) just my feelings that don't fall in any of these two categories. I'm trying to eat healthier (I'm a bit overweight) but don't blame myself when it doesn't work out and I don't count calories I just try to eat more fruits and vegetables and drink more water (in my case tea). A new thing I'm trying (so far pretty hard) is to give myself 1 hour for feeling sad and desperate every day instead of burning out and laying in bed for 2 days straight once a week. The problem with that is that there are days when I don't need it (like this week, I faced a lot of challenges at work and did good, I worked out, met with friends, took a long walk in the park, ate healthy all week) and then by the end of the week (right now) I burn out. So yesterday evening I cried for a couple of hours and this morning is no better( FYI I'm from Europe) , but I stopped, I plan to clean the apartment and some friends are coming over in the evening so I need to be strong. Maybe I will give myself an hour to cry after they leave, maybe I won't need it.

Now that yesterday was a bit hard, my old thoughts came back to haunt me (that I'm not taking care of my friends enough, that Im hurting my boyfriend with my sadness, that I'm not meeting my parents enough, that I'm not enough in general) so today I will need to fight this off. 

The thing is, I might be an empath (which I didn't even know was a thing, still not sure, first time reading about it yesterday while googling ""why do I feel so affected by my SO 's mood"" ). This is a new challenge. My SO is depressed I think, but this year we promised to work on ourselves. He started meditating, he is doing a bit of workout every morning, he started to cook too, and has made efforts to socialize more. But he is also tired after all the work sometimes, and the last two days he had bad mood which made me devastated. He has always had these mood swings, the old me tried obsessively to comfort him and make him feel better all the time, while ignoring my own feelings. 
How can I cope with this? I feel like I'm on the right path, and I don't want to go back to where I was.

TLDR: I started working on my life and doing stuff for myself to feel less anxious, but I'm way too affected by my boyfriend's mood swings (who is also trying to work on himself right now). What are some coping mechanisms for this?",4.131059055118108,4.33625863937008,4.835580708661421,88.66896161417324,70.48031496062994,7.861811023622048,28.788385826771652,7.554174236665415,1.451063779527559,2376,82,531,24,40,766,262,635,0.128,0.767,0.106,-0.9388,2,0,1,0,1,0,90.0,1,0,1,22,42,33,1,2,35,0,43,13,1,8,4,89,95,43,0,7,19,1,11,2,3,4,3,0,3,0,33,31,10,2,12,6,0,9,16,10,0,7,16,12,61,18,71,73,20,100,0,4,0,0,26,30,0,4,60,342,94,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05931899342957976,0.08597427942243441,0.04472772293032097,0.0,0.0,0.03655463586630691,0.0,0.0,0.06072684007856416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266718002641454,0.0448824337881928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901645563979348,0.2347422493214231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06148037781317284,0.05480589430922762,0.0,0.0,0.046304403212524166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059477896649705285,0.11809272423423947,0.13866780743389148,0.0,0.04629833333840895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052658560168810084,0.0,0.11000774177346558,0.0,0.0,0.04761018347652465,0.16662708481440353,0.0,0.14201632204656586,0.0,0.09058030658925917,0.0513643525383256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21743753184216735,0.03840194457067732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914464314060615,0.0,0.0,0.12459086849252027,0.0,0.0,0.10313167455754947,0.09164909281309194,0.04508639435789058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444593636754817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881090149279342,0.0,0.05754488299665157,0.0,0.05806365949249366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029541851253766363,0.04381677142967883,0.0,0.056917837520376886,0.0,0.0,0.03796811526358489,0.05252308262257424,0.0,0.0,0.0951413857817854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04569981925560024,0.0,0.1017268709685183,0.03588128363311063,0.0,0.10800645045649784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057024612523030725,0.0,0.0,0.04290601512789124,0.057132108442639176,0.0,0.15943195602397334,0.0,0.10383210243758573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061199406763537675,0.22562357029173924,0.0572463692966363,0.03642517387056847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059687574126334624,0.0,0.05131437725394065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054687251469247335,0.0,0.051435420466065404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075373066595036,0.0,0.03443625720783329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13771714025603102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479554237153436,0.0,0.0,0.0531641860202594,0.0,0.2282846003802861,0.05729472553612106,0.04292809905167581,0.04494084015500119,0.06157514761448416,0.0,0.061535591619947476,0.0,0.0,0.05066260941580224,0.0,0.040416398461088604,0.04320551480015922,0.0,0.0,0.061472505734094615,0.06241266098199363,0.10713551987020058,0.06888692216181651,0.0,0.04267475633183705,0.09403335569639706,0.06178243810893329,0.05095260785368075,0.0,0.05972279041941715,0.18247754970252364,0.058469032214797184,0.1575298544209673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341112971105761,0.08533501570953217,0.25870981200642423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04850472038487254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3913362988960882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03461588232044577
mentalhealth,NeitherCatNorFowl,2020/01/18,"Mental health support for older Asian American who does not believe in and/or understand it.  

Asking for some tips on resources but more so for how to encourage/convince an older immigrant Asian American to engage in mental and emotional therapy/counseling.

I won't go into the details or else a novel would spring up...but my near 70 year old mother has a lot of anger, bitterness and insecurities that are crippling her relationship with her family, namely her very elderly mother. It breaks my heart and frightens me when she gets into one of diatribes about all the wrongs she's experienced in her life and it was a hard life bringing up two kids as a single parent. Parts of the diatribes border on paranoia and it's why I feel like it's time for professional help rather than ""letting off steam"" as she claims. She's utterly convinced her elderly mother has looked down on her for a lifetime. And even into her 90's, is taking the effort make sure my mom feels awful about her life. It pains me to see my mom berate my grandmother. I have told my mother that even if it's all true, what do you want your 90 something year old mother to do at this point? Her time is very limited--let it go and work on yourself...

The problem is she is adamantly against any suggestion of therapy--having the notion that it's for ""crazy"" people.  According to her reasoning, she's not crazy just badly treated and bullied all her life. I try to couch therapy as a just a good chat to an understanding and sympathetic ear. Any experiences and tips to share on how I can steer her towards considering therapy? I know I can't make her go, but I can't just stand by either. I'm afraid that if she continues down this path unabated, I'm going to lose her into a void of angry paranoia.

Aside from the cultural antipathy towards mental/emotional health, there is of course the issue of finding therapy in her language and social zone. She's in Los Angeles and speaks Cantonese.  I listen and try to offer some help as I went through therapy on my own relationship with my mother.  Unfortunately, my Cantonese is limited and often I cannot express the nuance needed for this extremely delicate matter.

Any advice shared is appreciated.",6.964110576923076,7.481152305288464,7.578446153846158,70.36655384615386,64.40865384615384,10.982923076923079,33.94769230769231,10.793553405168565,3.8634099230769214,1773,72,303,45,25,588,217,416,0.11599999999999999,0.7509999999999999,0.133,0.5635,1,0,1,0,1,0,47.0,0,2,0,4,14,19,2,2,19,1,21,9,2,5,5,59,46,27,0,7,12,9,3,1,0,2,7,3,1,1,18,20,0,1,7,2,0,6,6,9,0,2,3,10,47,10,60,40,11,43,1,1,2,0,53,24,0,7,12,211,65,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607862447488428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17970868715142455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235043717969066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735498435979154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924506912613366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708644752005905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358626385216477,0.19817440331623384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11636265453171506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616701718077995,0.0830415753587826,0.0,0.0890799312197465,0.06293012162304269,0.0,0.0,0.08051088326056417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04602237123089272,0.0,0.20024987872700248,0.07388407832485128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890959192577747,0.0,0.0,0.18726695921412706,0.0,0.1043847652057187,0.1180871282654854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09194103981646398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04841088942638832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18015200170131845,0.2488767835115865,0.04303537248449057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739717777533116,0.09854799762550548,0.0,0.07488931136320494,0.0,0.0,0.11759891683957595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663161122730943,0.0,0.0,0.2063353226625684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531617405938095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18486718417803608,0.0,0.05969074346213299,0.0,0.09373189751101917,0.0,0.09781135672027154,0.0953907757029574,0.0,0.06106916361976161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327168128247737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428836877529884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056918803032517,0.0,0.18914720264803225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019477228117821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979467535803556,0.0,0.06781448567051447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999612770001968,0.08302194609987458,0.0,0.06623125206695235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029454555562922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272970247997228,0.0,0.0,0.084171908179718,0.0,0.11961200949207132,0.0,0.08604922666287118,0.18340553649621066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536373569983044,0.05195661508269566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165850629665343,0.07948576529748035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412915064683104,0.0,0.0,0.06257522444637845,0.09631045606811747,0.0,0.11345163422676978
mentalhealth,WonderBroGames,2020/01/18,YouTube Channel For Anxiety/Panic Help Youtube.com/WonderBro check it out!,8.295454545454547,12.495200818181825,5.8640909090909075,62.81613636363636,86.27272727272728,9.472727272727274,50.95454545454545,8.841846274778883,7.6746,63,5,6,2,2,18,11,11,0.0,0.728,0.272,0.4574,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,golumalone,2020/01/18,"Anger issues Hi guys, off late I’ve been dealing with temperament issues where I get absolutely livid over the smallest of things and and start to cry. 
I mean, it’s just fits of rage that come and go. 
How do I control this? It gets hard for me, especially at work.",2.2656603773584933,4.37264424528302,3.460981132075472,89.12883018867926,78.24528301886792,6.504150943396226,21.92075471698113,7.554174236665415,0.6844898113207547,207,6,45,3,5,67,45,53,0.266,0.7340000000000001,0.0,-0.9392,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,3,2,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,9,8,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,8,7,0,9,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,26,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21701295244985655,0.0,0.0,0.2825577464087248,0.0,0.0,0.2767301700369114,0.0,0.25972585335783244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632431000447332,0.0,0.14317601812391306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494475092804327,0.0,0.0,0.22567726353768294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5258930319169638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841848244066743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744225464629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17831534976628322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673692195288102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834059824385547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lettxrs,2020/01/18,"Love and sertraline Diagnosed anxiety and depression. Been having more SI, no intent, but the thought is strong. I’m constantly crying. I cancel on my friends every time I make plans. I can barely get up. When something stresses me out I freak out- almost like a tantrum. I feel like my life has no purpose right now because it feels like no one loves me. The only thing I want from life is love so I always feel unfulfilled. I am currently taking 100mg sertraline but it is not helping. I feel like this is more than depression, more than anxiety. I’m going to see a psychiatrist soon but I feel weak. What are they going to say?",1.8241256830601067,4.514579172131152,3.250852459016393,86.24196174863388,85.14754098360655,6.859890710382513,23.70710382513661,8.021203637495839,1.7299753005464478,497,19,94,11,15,162,81,122,0.287,0.501,0.212,-0.8832,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,2,4,15,1,1,4,0,10,7,0,2,0,18,28,7,0,1,4,0,5,4,1,0,4,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,6,0,0,2,4,6,0,1,2,7,15,9,9,26,3,13,0,2,1,3,7,5,0,1,10,60,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773729259545965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276285120748205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22573125884606354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993736769252672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15943540594870922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16206279443779095,0.0,0.0,0.25414731778909794,0.14974725220626903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12430653710528085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729964552695621,0.3162020262971301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139869507358686,0.0,0.07708214901907155,0.0,0.1676976933201188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889114114229224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084199140650754,0.2883170863403082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3994745160494457,0.0,0.09848229230553884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997509166843632,0.1122087636930126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599604667489198,0.0,0.11732758137459424,0.0,0.0,0.11756812507969107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358142030277335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16900347680233266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109296871282806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098017225285169,0.0,0.0,0.11712813482685533,0.08603018514103304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702132113615567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,C-Dub47,2020/01/18,"Mental disorder similar to cognitive dissonance? So this girl I’ve been friends with wasn’t like this 8 years ago and still wasn’t even 3/4 years ago. But in the last 2 years she developed this thing where she thinks facts about what she says or does are lies or “bullshit”. She will tell me I said stuff to her, that she actually said to me. Or just denies even saying what she has said to me before and actually seems like she doesn’t remember. When she criticizes me she is super vague and when I ask for specifics she looks at txt messages and when I explain she just starts doing what I previously mentioned or just says that I’m a dick and so wrong about everything. Any doctors in this group?",5.364906731549066,6.2040962773722645,5.247396593673964,84.55378751013791,67.97810218978103,9.300567721005676,28.360908353609084,9.444778638647367,2.183002270884022,558,18,115,11,9,173,83,137,0.155,0.764,0.081,-0.8736,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,14,5,0,0,2,0,9,2,1,0,1,19,19,15,0,0,8,0,0,2,1,1,1,6,0,1,11,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,7,20,4,11,12,0,15,0,0,1,1,26,4,1,5,13,75,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.2956824384507731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26858953456486323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302454942070784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14163116128972314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289145334892514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736310370625647,0.15506569768631492,0.1325778399711742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20012738798363197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615757781727286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704779055769204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12349194641475368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802956706142145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272210463559094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526754098831704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716188911698279,0.0,0.4323308696960865,0.3614343769015139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791904561109622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723180766037553,0.0,0.12098733737798913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17343016691968127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241684767255882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064923732199138,0.09707447425624607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564042893307665,0.0,0.2926812641691187
mentalhealth,jasonfrank403,2020/01/18,"How do I change myself without becoming resentful? I don't know where to post this. I posted something similar on [r/selfhelp](https://www.reddit.com/r/selfhelp/) but didn't get any responses, so I hope this is the right place.

So this is something I can't quite get over. The mainstay advice if you're unattractive is to basically get in shape and become physically fit. I've been going to the gym for 2 years, have made okay progress but honestly am not where I should be. Because I'm not at my potential looks-wise, I feel worthless about who I currently am. I don't want to be happy until I've reached my full potential and this is causing a lot of anguish. When I look at gym transformation pictures, I don't feel motivated to change myself. Instead I feel bitter and resentful about how much better my life would be if I looked good and feel pity for my current meek self. There is no logic to these feelings. Of course it would be better to be strong and have muscles than to not, but to me this is synonymous with the paradigm that until I've reached that goal, I basically suck and am worthless. I just can't stand the thought of people in the future liking me because I've reached (lets face it) an evolutionary standard of male attractiveness, whereas before that I was a loser worth no ones time.

Has anybody else dealt with this? I want to change for the better, but I also don't want the journey to be painful. I could really use an eye opener right now, or some book recommendations/general advice.

Thank you for reading",6.433018581721655,7.004677696245732,6.545364050056888,77.12807262040201,65.55290102389078,9.514524080394388,33.001327265832394,9.444778638647367,2.935176867652636,1227,49,227,22,18,392,160,293,0.146,0.655,0.2,0.9578,2,0,2,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,0,9,14,22,4,1,12,1,33,4,2,6,0,46,55,21,0,10,12,0,5,1,0,3,2,0,0,2,13,9,0,0,9,4,1,2,13,10,0,1,5,9,28,12,33,39,4,29,0,4,3,0,4,15,1,6,10,154,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251019135287096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210808993029704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832523192661894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14042331392247126,0.25441089088651675,0.09800829793513234,0.0,0.0,0.30559768886563216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831989927135485,0.3655302866207053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919605453673642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621673733520164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911881883698881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805278120857747,0.0,0.06545851417864576,0.0966061406748068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260950202746895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439809624693392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329901245509786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777767290190147,0.08135387929217346,0.05627032701077921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19344162178438729,0.0,0.0,0.09792051971987224,0.0,0.10898454563901823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466934448120471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804783507662755,0.0,0.12255789179439992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985016995954196,0.0,0.12033686788303373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206180542179781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250635952243767,0.11520952521145328,0.0,0.07378620436414553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19672337393402345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015614510005047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773398515894278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106040755792333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143874936486347,0.06716142580561336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947711919590978,0.0,0.0,0.20380553616424052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110278253360018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16363879939180695,0.0,0.0,0.07417108519449146
mentalhealth,SlavaRossiya,2020/01/18,"Could I Have Anxiety? I apologize if this is out of place for this reddit as a question for what essentially may seem like a request for a diagnosis, but please, hear me out first. I want to ask rather if it's worth checking into. I'm currently 16, close to 17, and living with my parents. I would have gone to them about this, but in the past they've tended to tell me that any concerns I have about myself are unfounded or will disappear in time. It's more of an optimistic outlook than them being negligent, but I still don't feel comfortable going directly to them about it.

  I think I might have social anxiety. I don't believe it's severe, but I think it could be affecting me in negative ways. I always feel nervous when interacting with people outside of my family. I always worry about whether or not they look down on me, whether or not they may have ulterior motives, and always try to consider the worst case scenario to make sure it's aborted. I can hardly carry on a good conversation with anyone outside of the few I am more comfortable with before stopping out of fearing how stupid they must see me. I can stand familiar, more organized collections of people, such as classrooms, but I find it difficult to even talk to most of these individuals, as I recognize them but don't know them personally. I'm currently in my Junior year of highschool, and even though I haven't had any problems with going to pep ralleys, (Which are essentially mandatory,) recently I've started skipping them due to the uncomfort they were giving me from everyone being crowded together. I am at my worst in more disorganized settings, say like at a party, and  with people I am unfamiliar with. Rarely can I muster any courage to overcome the fear that comes to talking with people I am unfamiliar with without feeling like impending doom is on the horizon. Because of these issues, I've started getting very frustrated with myself. I don't have any close friends, and I constantly fear putting off any casual friends I make, which has on several different occasions caused me to stop talking with them, and eventually lead to us drifting apart.

However, the worst moment I've had that I can remember in regards to a social setting was when I was going to sing the national anthem with my school's choir at a football game. I was still unfamiliar as to how I'd get in, whether or not I had to still pay for admission. My father had dropped me off and pulled right up near the entrance, and was waiting to see if everything would turn out okay. But just the idea of asking the admissions people was horrifying. After I eventually got out of the car, I started walking up to them but stopped before simply walking back and forth. Eventually, I heard my father call my name and I walked closer to talk, telling him I didn't think I felt comfortable doing it. After going back and forth, my dad, peeved about the situation, and asked for me. It's not a situation I'm proud of, and it still embarrasses me to this day. I've had similar situations where I've done okay with walking up and asking a random person a question, but it usually happened after a period of mental prep time until I felt ""ok"" enough to go and talk.

Again, I know this is a subreddit for mental health, and I understand it's primarily a platform for those suffering from mental illness. I feel bad about using this to ask, but as currently I don't feel comfortable talking to my parents about this, I thought, ""Hey, what the hell?"" The internet is the one place I don't feel constantly exposed, so I definitely felt more comfortable about asking this. My real question is whether or not this is worth getting checked out with someone. If this seems more like shyness or social awkwardness than anything else, then obviously it's probably not worth the time. However, even if it's possible, could I try to ride it out? I don't expect an official diagnosis, but I guess I just wanted some other opinions before I jump to any crazy conclusions. If you are reading this, thank you for taking the time, and have a good day.",8.359195425294253,7.579080569570872,8.549414824447336,68.88734186922744,61.89986996098829,12.100443466373243,38.83368343836485,11.362043627235082,4.507016578306825,3254,147,572,81,39,1072,324,769,0.157,0.748,0.096,-0.9956,8,0,0,0,0,0,86.0,1,2,12,5,29,38,3,6,34,3,60,2,0,9,3,139,119,57,0,17,37,5,10,4,2,7,2,4,0,2,37,42,0,4,26,5,6,19,17,17,0,2,20,17,87,21,114,86,13,102,2,2,3,0,58,39,1,25,43,420,124,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831795066167674,0.0,0.0,0.2260862833588973,0.0,0.08477777768753622,0.0,0.0,0.03874431727866584,0.0,0.045598128834753685,0.0,0.3108080845181729,0.0,0.0,0.08521452452838219,0.04626546174328632,0.03377773288031348,0.0,0.14145078969727906,0.062428670466881615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056580326455611986,0.0,0.0,0.056921857779541674,0.0,0.047731248387388334,0.0,0.11975815374563906,0.0,0.13272235144635927,0.0,0.0,0.0714703905110626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05789218991443034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05670419032840609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04628837137568291,0.0,0.0,0.057253869477878264,0.0,0.10979435872798148,0.0,0.0,0.05294711731866313,0.049799393919454885,0.0,0.052236097861299534,0.1870566879505343,0.1681033139569545,0.0395852797508023,0.1596083387367783,0.0,0.05064420272289192,0.04713215189870333,0.0,0.0,0.08562004587371425,0.0,0.08684911420716615,0.05315481070256243,0.15745535017705398,0.09295141449555057,0.04431684706875272,0.0,0.0610409243181074,0.0,0.04899933141196968,0.0,0.04963693364704674,0.0,0.0,0.058898781516568126,0.06245167241212286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06255172172931024,0.0,0.05783417682736091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06090433488776348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828310608919944,0.0,0.0489284959119924,0.0,0.0465308733005343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397389201582906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675222855856733,0.05878179515755344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03754759592927134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12305362896866615,0.0,0.052895602072882734,0.19207335562741104,0.0967646409175182,0.11578437982886068,0.060824101031275564,0.0,0.0624670249719357,0.0,0.0,0.05974190210802285,0.053020375166210734,0.0,0.05570286750731916,0.18621735904996564,0.0,0.055425505340356035,0.06306929181860804,0.0,0.0,0.05471119431462956,0.0,0.06276930672823787,0.04732027318288578,0.0,0.044064661940218144,0.0,0.05607839482088777,0.08831000564209468,0.10088729531601497,0.0,0.1251962097110957,0.0,0.0,0.18685120613057707,0.0,0.16945211223994044,0.04694914570672416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176595335194812,0.0,0.1770036209497884,0.13897700361222365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052223750360847684,0.0,0.04166180794979127,0.2672212164142863,0.09686245693453667,0.05101455340325505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651445319110643,0.054440545201546564,0.04398975589853303,0.12924125701665126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524019873442493,0.06027072386195561,0.0,0.05768429555513584,0.06665202157834611,0.0478568902277536,0.061026848943965824,0.04571947419526737,0.06536510942321674,0.04398228406355622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05341375476371567,0.0,0.0,0.05627206307174624,0.0,0.07872407366433966,0.0,0.0,0.03568255203727379
mentalhealth,ToeyToez7,2020/01/18,"Not sure if i was abused.. *Trigger warning.. involves talk of pedophelia*

Im actually having a pretty good day.. but as intrusive thoughts do they come at any time, mostly during happy times. 

Ive always been sexual, being a 6 yr old i remember masturbating, even once in class. My parents split when i was a baby, so i lived with my mum and would stay and go on holidays with my dad. At one point my mum and i were living with my dad and my aunty and cousins for a short amount of time..  i remember my 16yo cousin asking me to touch his penis when i was around 5 and one day i just randomly blurted it out in front of everyone. 

I watched porn and seen alot of magazines from a young age, because dad was an alcoholic and single he didnt really hide this stuff. 

We went on alot of holidays together. He had a decent job as a foreman offshore on an oil rig so he always had alot of money. Holidays meant him giving me alot of money to go and spend, on my own in a city at probably 9 years old, getting taxis by myself, getting back to the hotel room alone.

Growing up my mum would tell me alot of weird sexual shit about him, that she lived hom because he was cheating on her with men. 

Was i was 9-10yrs old, i remember taking my friend to house.. i entered the house first first thing i noticed was porn on the screen.. i told my friend to wait at the door for a second, i went in and turned the tv off them i noticed hom with his penis im his hand so i put i towel over him ane told my friend that she could come through now. This was like 3pm in the afternoon.

As i got older i questioned more whether something weird had happened to me.. because the only thing I can fully remember is my cousin asking me to touch his penis.  

Although i did have to deal with his crazy sexual women, him having vibrators plugged in around the houae where i could see. Being told rumours about my dad constantly (we live in a small town), one night he even hired a hooker when i was staying in a one bedroom unit in a high rise hotel in the city. And i was there the entire time i was l6 i think?

When i was 17, i was drunk at a cousins wedding.. At the time i was really fit and looked great. My whole younger years i was always chubby and plain. Well my other cousons come down from another state for the wedding and one of them was talking to me alot. Hanging out with me the entire time.. i got pretty drunk, so much that by the time it was probably 9pm at night i was almost passing out. He was cuddling me in the back of a car, my  aunty (not hos mum) opened the door and said whats going on here? I said nothing his just looking after me. O saod o wamted to go home and he could come if he wanted. Anyway next point i remember us lying in my bed, and my dads friend walking in asling to use my bong. So i went out in the lotchen and smoked a few cones.. then went back to bed i passed out. As far as i remember nothing sexual happened.. and ive always been prettu good at remembering those kinds of things when drunk. Anyway he went back home to his state, and was messaging me on Facebook alot, he was calling me babe aswell and asking me to come and live with him. Then about 6 months later hes dad passed away.. so him and his brothers went to his fineral and on the way home he fall asleep at the wheel and his car smashed into a semi trailer and he died on impact. About 3 months after that happened my dad and i are having a fight and he asks me if i screwed this cousin. I said no, but honestly i dont know and never will.

At one point I'd had a huge fight with dad and we stopped talking for 2 years when i was around 19.

At 21 i had a psychotic episode and ended up in hospital.. and just after that thats when we got talking again..  a year later i end up having another one.. and just before thos happens a woman dad was seeing who was known to go through psychotic episodes aswell (pretty sure hers were drug induced) started to teip off with me a bit. Anyway.. she told me about this video he got her to watch and it was a horse fucking a chick. And a dog.. and whatever else... so i guess thos sortve set off my next episode.

When i hit age 25 I had my first kid, a son. I adored him to death, but i started having intrusive thoughts.. id be bathing him, then all of a sudden I'd imagine myself drowning him. Id be changing his nappy and id visual myself sexually abusing him. Everytime This happened wed be having fun, laughing and being happy.

Second son comes 2 years later, same thing wod imagine caving a rock into his head.

Then i started to get really angry out of no where..  i go to the doctor and get diagnosed with Bipolar type 2. 

Id never let my kids spend anytime alone with my dad. I just know he's bad. 

Anyway the whole point of this post turnwd into something a different from when i started but npw I've got this far i guess my question to anyone still reading this is.. frok everything I've said here does it sound like someone whos been abused? Or just someone who was exposed to too much to young?

And the going back to the original reason why i started this post.. even though im medicated for Bipolar i still have some pretty fucked thoughts about my kks that can dway their way into my thoughts. And a main one is pedofilea. It doesnt arouse me but i know that monster in me gets a bit of a kick when i think about this stuff. 

For example.. i was watching a youtube video on murderers and why they did it. one of the murderers was a pedofile who went into datail about how he abused his son...  he said he would strangle his kid while he raped him, let him turn blue then release his grip. Then he got to a point where he started covering his head with a plastic bag.

Once ive watched something like this, I wont obessive over it but it will stick with me. It was alot worsr before i started taking meds. And im just goingnto remind u here. This stuff does not arouse me, and i do NOT masturbate over it. But I do find myself wanting to watch and read stories like these. Murder cases with kids.. abuse stories. 

With my eldest i found it hard to be affectionate with him for a long time because of this stuff, its only been in the last couple of months that i can feel close to him and realise im not doing anything wrong.

Anyway i guess im wondering if anyone has gone through something similar and wonders if theyre some kind of monster. Or can almost know they had something happen to them when they can lt remember it. 

When i was diagnosed.. i was told i had an overactive imagination.. now that im aware of that i wont look out for this kind of stuff, but i might be reading an article in a magazine, and cant stop myself. 

Anyway im rambling now. Thanks for reading.",2.6013095238095225,4.152945229532168,3.8286883876357587,89.36776315789473,75.50584795321637,6.727819548872181,24.641186299081035,7.413659706084162,1.0239975772765249,5206,170,1107,63,112,1699,482,1368,0.09699999999999999,0.813,0.09,-0.9103,4,2,8,0,6,0,157.0,5,0,8,3,68,40,11,0,76,0,99,25,7,6,5,191,196,98,6,13,28,24,6,4,4,8,8,6,10,9,54,92,4,3,32,17,4,34,15,15,1,14,80,26,178,25,167,94,25,216,0,0,13,9,144,85,4,29,92,736,232,9,0.0,0.1914573108452753,0.031537637586359406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034538038466929086,0.06472347679777574,0.06694325743055199,0.0,0.0,0.10756442618064398,0.0,0.0,0.0219773005062605,0.06777633453580575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04519489591810996,0.0,0.02659490257532582,0.0863094280149624,0.12085160712536935,0.0,0.030363758906567367,0.12425246582200455,0.02698412147840957,0.07880284021502605,0.0,0.05500035589669256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056561818480031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03300021970682823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03418808454440772,0.16703420948630174,0.0,0.03492420097991688,0.0,0.07740971168083999,0.03575917464837107,0.0,0.041684782275835434,0.03331836656831566,0.0,0.06560403695932485,0.033540908809496284,0.03376535814059686,0.0,0.03307877059814734,0.0565632763433714,0.0,0.0378763730570124,0.0,0.037478538326908346,0.0,0.026997483417971428,0.0,0.05724818670051175,0.0,0.0,0.06403706354427241,0.0,0.0,0.030881166896939826,0.02904527144957637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01634091636185435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029538002366312162,0.08246884378440378,0.0,0.03543494194760125,0.0998750096416608,0.0597548107077949,0.08442392228649613,0.031002303124488963,0.1285691699836449,0.05421349243751813,0.15508560465412688,0.035630631718257415,0.10680552975524343,0.0,0.17147183164641916,0.06880607448453324,0.028950517229886487,0.0,0.06633503943546673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034145667231720835,0.09725255595551932,0.0,0.0,0.07458110384665556,0.0,0.0,0.27927127991684525,0.0,0.032070558607425415,0.0,0.0,0.10096245206977784,0.07104435616755223,0.026343426219484597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609454569424543,0.0,0.06315563227237163,0.0,0.14268662061247658,0.028600350904269663,0.08141676470917125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035897934473651714,0.03255691427443684,0.0,0.034284216378335015,0.0,0.0,0.07738758975254632,0.0,0.04751479393191885,0.0,0.049851159627870484,0.0,0.06874097000380824,0.06065637571789334,0.0,0.0620198505622972,0.07358835460247867,0.10173669265368147,0.06883508102917113,0.19709519076230733,0.049158483858766734,0.0,0.0,0.035885236495358984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527544487872616,0.0,0.06190328653220593,0.13151581252750252,0.06968838883654171,0.0,0.0,0.032488445740658164,0.07240695540696092,0.0,0.12930670204093975,0.0,0.0621110801706825,0.03322821439800423,0.0,0.0,0.2928793158522594,0.0,0.15370875994878916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05150641169924376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033173890538533785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05476575412074584,0.12439960643103888,0.0,0.0,0.1601235794597456,0.06889322630028782,0.051618281001167665,0.05403847286032695,0.0,0.0,0.1849814882315147,0.0,0.0,0.06091853277568308,0.0,0.048598122416468624,0.10390371122979716,0.028247295132616288,0.029754007726941263,0.0,0.0,0.08588238616093283,0.04141604897498248,0.03175220196051655,0.10262730531540418,0.1507587581730228,0.0,0.0,0.15440583448469913,0.0,0.0,0.07030525463279061,0.0,0.0,0.038874490371052194,0.02791231494997473,0.0,0.0,0.03812390467239996,0.051304936829735234,0.0,0.0,0.02905770013502638,0.20971331305479146,0.0583238098592599,0.07216362900720877,0.0,0.0,0.07009483259720957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887319029109441,0.03533458290395017,0.0,0.10405843609387404
mentalhealth,Music141414,2020/01/18,I don't know what's wrong with me I have Autism but I also struggle with my mental health a lot. It is to the point where I wish I didnt exist. My emotions are extreme and I wish I didnt have to feel them. I went to a psychiatrist and got prescribed abilify but they dont know what is wrong with me yet. It has been helping but the depression is bad. Somedays I just lay in bed all day. Somedays I feel my life has no meaning. I go from being super goal oriented and wanting to travel to wanting to not exist. Its tiring.,0.10923076923076992,2.2934727297297286,2.4102702702702707,92.99008316008316,87.46846846846847,4.8568260568260575,21.151074151074152,6.297961479604792,0.26389203049203,407,14,89,4,13,138,68,111,0.131,0.698,0.171,0.5870000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,2,4,6,0,1,4,0,14,3,0,0,1,22,26,7,0,4,5,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,5,6,0,0,5,1,0,3,6,5,0,0,5,2,18,1,11,20,2,8,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,66,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860472568952784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515667723368815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198421878270755,0.0,0.1600513821542133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177863079178522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20902887366702105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879180901025476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056090138328021,0.0,0.14862176832502882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19752400362782052,0.0,0.0,0.12455503335876805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042498631645979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13125417023782818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15798234425835395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024186374588996,0.0,0.0,0.1872685744014204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17566532766655787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19426534328120507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213579278111693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192095961647773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722622630459821,0.0,0.0,0.4273807124679547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4063424098651309,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YoItsMCat,2020/01/18,"I just need someone to talk to Please, I haven't felt this low in...years? iI don't know. I might have to give up my cat, it's the anniversary of my grandma's death, a friend of mine is a missing person, and my I'm fighting with people. I am afraid, can't think, can't stop crying",2.653064516129032,2.680145112903229,3.967903225806453,94.2218548387097,73.6774193548387,6.845161290322581,23.56451612903225,5.985473137389443,0.2265999999999999,215,5,54,1,4,71,46,62,0.20800000000000002,0.659,0.133,-0.5541,0,0,0,0,2,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,1,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,9,15,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,1,8,1,7,13,0,3,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318144915197131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900387496497874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333818951444978,0.0,0.0,0.2897772438970291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660121640157302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3204531512188119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239843045501941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20942032107390032,0.2637596727478552,0.0,0.33158692743698936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559466183097275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25254768439285225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427959218863657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19355704763099965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19452597888896364
mentalhealth,dancewind,2020/01/18,How can I be more forgiving to myself? My internal monologue is really critical and it’s starting to get to me. How can I be nicer to myself or completely change my personality into someone I like more?,4.634615384615382,6.347247846153842,7.331282051282053,65.65538461538463,70.53846153846153,11.353846153846154,33.51282051282051,11.20814326018867,4.672189743589745,162,8,27,6,3,59,28,39,0.061,0.7290000000000001,0.21,0.7476,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,6,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,2,5,5,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4674358145968334,0.0,0.4632882685240316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23085683454531614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21587348933857567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3858204928523473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28307078077022824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3743917688074765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31275514678933475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,schmidtrandi18,2020/01/18,"My Friend Asked Me to be In a Photoshoot This is one of my first times posting so pls bear with me!! Not sure what subreddit to post this in. 
So, my friend is working on her photography portfolio. She’s asked me to be in a little photoshoot for her/she wants to take pictures of me. I’m super freaking anxious about it!! How do you pose? How do you not be awkward? How do I look decent? If anyone has literally ANY tips, please please help me out. It sounds so silly but it’s something I agreed to as a plea for regaining my own self confidence and self image.",0.14618421052631447,2.534446491228074,2.1975219298245605,91.99786184210528,92.85964912280701,5.6570175438596495,20.282894736842106,7.1686216300943375,0.7131421052631577,436,15,93,8,16,145,73,114,0.040999999999999995,0.755,0.204,0.9494,0,0,1,2,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,3,7,7,0,1,3,0,9,0,0,3,1,12,15,10,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,6,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,2,0,2,15,5,17,12,1,10,0,0,1,0,11,6,0,1,2,64,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12953874580209687,0.0,0.0,0.21519784054400587,0.0,0.13319402290150578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3561621594683249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16202946290783926,0.0,0.0,0.2943419616587491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276804594147946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19091956975333768,0.0,0.0,0.15996240582695964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907997103496946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4181984494631513,0.0,0.0,0.3648707490770086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974422023099191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664739184651732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17953320358016628,0.0,0.1432236826441175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107540509156193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235508189312406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867793275587967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nick_macca-,2020/01/18,Would someone please pm me their number. I know it sounds far out but I’m 17 and can’t get therapy or counseling on my own. And I’m in a bit of crisis. I just want to express what I’m feeling and receive practical advice.,0.4437500000000014,2.431647541666667,3.1498333333333366,89.57850000000002,84.0,6.34,24.18333333333333,7.554174236665415,1.2422033333333329,174,7,38,3,5,61,40,48,0.11900000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.126,-0.5647,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,11,9,5,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,5,8,2,5,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,0,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677535182836192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.410864050144661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902879972488584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19662127552763006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068257365681784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4131065389704587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188702958478868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4303757461890524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22197413250189804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26733999396397473,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beyond_broken87,2020/01/18,Currently struggling So I've struggled with depression since I was 14 (now 32) but the past month it's been the worst it's ever been. I feel like everything around me is turning to shit because of me. The only glimmer of hope I even have at this point is my child. I had a friend that I would talk to that would make me feel normal and it seems he has disappeared. This always happens I just seem to lose people and I never know why. I dont know how to stop feeling so lost and unhappy. I would settle for just being able to not cry at this point. I can feel hopelessness lingering like my shadow and every time I look it's there.,3.76268376068376,4.584738892307693,4.657179487179491,87.40004273504276,71.61538461538461,7.931623931623932,25.213675213675213,8.167268648758528,1.3124957264957264,496,14,106,7,9,161,86,130,0.25,0.623,0.128,-0.9625,1,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,2,10,12,1,2,4,0,14,1,1,2,2,28,28,8,0,5,4,0,4,2,1,3,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,1,8,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,5,5,16,4,12,19,1,14,0,4,1,0,4,5,1,3,10,72,25,0,0.14577340795106272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129515307951973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297692388336534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886211646711256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16012524364234154,0.0,0.0,0.1255544226643832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084534845495367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628196112992334,0.13186039317684245,0.12282038335430165,0.0,0.13101173954280934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2948296602435532,0.10414055176714336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262417337641792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890694322705196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478588588107996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16022650541187644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243504765127749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241294870794665,0.1630831561035693,0.15912889477240516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730488175639816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163549434671033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11242943885740203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428269891669343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086724554812312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915721249421292,0.1010609264894733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756059772863857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654132714646685,0.0,0.0,0.14963430844160508,0.12058526943795198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187309634821104,0.0,0.30478803358122497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716714351251145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500164645495817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15855960796290644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153782707266012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106597396951101,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,witchbinch888,2020/01/18,"tips and supplements for anxiety and depression?? hello everybody! so I’m going to start this off with I am about to get on antidepressants. I have stressed myself out to the max to the point where I am shutting down (reading & understanding has been harder as well I have been having panic attacks in my sleep). I know I need medication as this has been honestly one of the worst episodes I’ve ever had (I was also on hormonal birth control so yes I’m a wreck) yet I only want to be on it temporarily or until I feel stable enough to get off of them. I have always been in this repeat cycle of being on antidepressants and stopping them and then having to go back on them due to another episode. my question is how do I break this cycle? I have been on antidepressants since I was 14, I am now 19 and I don’t want to have to depend on them my whole life. please help me and give me advice because I’m so desperate. thank you in advance!",2.9175198412698435,4.7160915555555585,4.62534060846561,82.94055059523811,75.24338624338623,7.687962962962962,25.04001322751323,8.472884824447931,1.6883568783068783,740,25,148,14,16,250,111,189,0.121,0.772,0.107,-0.6854,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,4,2,12,8,1,2,4,1,25,3,1,3,1,21,41,16,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,8,0,2,4,1,0,3,1,5,1,1,8,1,26,3,33,31,3,32,0,1,0,0,9,17,0,3,11,116,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16756973449064216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371336914209887,0.142686342834054,0.18580013065965792,0.0,0.0,0.17981330164622308,0.13118287605440113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950849590297711,0.0,0.1318586864878972,0.0,0.10453352910873184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923310805682222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14769676233375212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17718622658483693,0.0,0.0,0.15511483179158372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670619746771722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17918400938297127,0.1645006777551932,0.19491377339479848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494043295257013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424174627700606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112245283987401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17274956774202133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715135739963565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162003005335792,0.13041940593434787,0.0,0.20119658930652864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882351890872755,0.16210544264872062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920985223389184,0.0,0.17152790260944564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185126659167016,0.0,0.17160533916743115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137548638585392,0.0,0.0,0.1433662101600061,0.19643147575978606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15787712343051205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17851828628924613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20228846005735407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15418246015545992,0.0,0.0,0.19145296775682447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IllegalRaccoon,2020/01/18,"Does anyone else just not care for other people besides close friends and family? I think it’s pretty normal, but just wanted to see what everyone else thought. Personally, besides a handful of people, I just don’t care about anyone else. When I hear news on something bad happening, like a shooting, or even an orphanage blowing up, I just don’t care. I feel nothing, and in some (probably most) cases I make jokes and laugh about it. I could kill someone and just not care, anyone besides my closest friends and family I would feel no remorse, guilt, or sympathy for. I’m not actively looking to kill, scam, hurt, or wrong someone else that did not personally do something to me,  I just would feel no emotion towards doing so. Does anyone else feel this way?",7.425053191489361,7.541127631205676,7.26814716312057,74.34562500000001,63.46808510638298,9.886879432624113,36.77393617021277,9.516144504307137,3.539134042553192,600,27,103,10,8,191,84,141,0.313,0.5660000000000001,0.121,-0.9901,0,0,2,1,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,11,15,2,1,3,0,8,1,1,1,0,35,25,11,2,5,14,0,5,1,2,2,0,1,0,2,6,6,0,0,6,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,2,8,11,9,12,20,2,8,0,1,2,0,5,6,0,5,2,66,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28247235906796114,0.31044410253603777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843266512350622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41188475267183217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063633230058195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676290409292414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4218420396293432,0.11360584179840627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667062804315744,0.0,0.0,0.09650510181454597,0.0,0.0,0.190418296511202,0.0,0.20426453475759115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15605705584837148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930959240513774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382876556522535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811729376622313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234721264126027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04934108175824162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481040881530623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741498255363433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895370930085813,0.09690747783288146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003450748130605,0.17636997058008785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274827794353104,0.10888974957466023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047998188873504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17114556243976334,0.15550185294981858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471355238009117,0.0,0.08017879134448301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05956949933686913,0.08016517265791998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14348797685261291,0.11042223670175294,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Stuckinthiscountry,2020/01/18,"How to find a therapist I'll try to get to the point as quickly as possible. I have been struggling with anxiety (though not diagnosed or anything but that's my understanding of it) for a long time. In early 2019 I tried seeking help due to a series of anxiety attacks. However, due to my health insurance plan I was not able to find anyone who would help me. After a while of going through it on my own I was able to reach a relatively normal state in life for a while. In fall of 2019 I moved from California to Italy for grad school. I became extremely anxious in the weeks leading up to leaving. Once I arrived in this country I was again in a state of being relatively ok if not super great. I returned home for a few weeks for the holidays but was filled with a huge amount of dread at the thought of returning. I absolutely hate it here in Italy but I have to finish it out. Now that I am back I just feel absolutely awful all the time and I really think I need a professional to talk to but I don't even know how to start. It already wasn't possible to find one in my home, I don't know how to in another country. I can barely speak the language here, I don't know what to do. Does anyone have any advice on how to find an English speaking therapist in Northern Italy (I can give more details on where I am if that would help) or is there an online resource for talking to a professional that someone could recommend?",3.7928720238095264,4.969125836805559,5.24607142857143,81.87750000000003,71.88194444444444,8.680158730158729,29.339285714285715,9.107695989026183,2.3897994047619053,1123,45,229,23,21,378,149,288,0.12,0.809,0.071,-0.9435,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,15,7,2,2,19,2,22,3,0,5,1,38,35,18,0,7,12,0,1,0,0,2,3,2,2,0,12,4,0,0,11,1,0,5,7,4,0,1,7,3,26,3,54,24,5,45,0,0,0,0,9,19,0,4,19,167,38,5,0.2192561613855425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071272916652505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12097731311939187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455085417815549,0.11495460125481273,0.1677303633294356,0.12384852679027905,0.0,0.15330900600044758,0.0,0.09021456949230768,0.0,0.0,0.12471776821161472,0.0,0.08429722711516635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752910191506358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127019425019316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593627218484306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240831337052205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055431251553529584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4007923186922179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05727614742980482,0.1051652444194574,0.062304164637812874,0.0,0.0,0.12086534598490348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082350333124632,0.0,0.11652952333624825,0.0,0.0,0.22044417488280574,0.0,0.21993180692437647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18074617838025805,0.0,0.0,0.11608030840839725,0.0,0.0,0.07743355548082186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970174016185886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651730032205268,0.0,0.0812878327413233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741224283344393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675032806430033,0.07428682467445019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363397118185336,0.24717837811858775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023055567922973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094947042498254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288751701441668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759531976697819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460707274831194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17622979724591767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545733025357773,0.0,0.07024524752004285,0.1077090326684799,0.08703245049461683,0.12785003091525285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886054122835776,0.0,0.0,0.11412669824309316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17587406733570354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557532862816976,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pandafreak554,2020/01/18,"Why do I only self harm one side of my body?? I have been cutting for about 5 years now and I've been getting better at stopping (thankfully) I see a counselor and all that good stuff so dont worry

I have really only self harmed one side of my body which is my right, my legs and my wrists I have only ever cut like twice on the other side, could someone tell me if there is any reasoning behind that? I'm super curious, kinda ingreaded and worried as weird as it seems 
 Thank you.",3.52991341991342,4.438721414141416,4.824704184704185,85.6618181818182,72.23232323232324,7.6773448773448765,24.24386724386725,7.957251820313856,1.2006958152958145,376,10,78,5,7,125,71,99,0.142,0.6759999999999999,0.182,0.7597,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,2,5,11,2,0,2,0,10,4,4,1,2,12,16,8,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,3,2,1,12,6,9,13,1,10,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,3,5,52,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102426294209734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144392627716282,0.0,0.3626962023789553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035201451724118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913427174723672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14768049692663587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529804416942922,0.0,0.0,0.13693704187367847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976192892394585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22126211823355127,0.3725060161198494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459029297863004,0.167861289941843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13942548944489522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009926751631268,0.14862826841513654,0.3406372919570789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13833199131967736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649496256660995,0.0,0.0,0.18689677909246255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426988324299998,0.3006207952169652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473192305796332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33160247852033925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051358529400705
mentalhealth,EugenexBreeze,2020/01/18,"Leta make a change! Let's all come together and donate to one of the best charities for mental health! They aid in research, free screening, free help, recourses, 24/7 helpline, ending the stigma with mental health and much much more! We got this guys!!! [donate to Mental Health America ](https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=473857866895794&id=100028147532519)",12.207058823529415,16.923461862745093,6.897803921568631,63.77611764705881,57.82352941176471,8.00156862745098,25.88627450980392,8.841846274778883,2.4537733333333325,309,8,36,5,5,80,41,51,0.0,0.711,0.289,0.9576,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,3,0,1,3,0,1,1,7,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,5,6,2,5,3,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,21,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19647670386325244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903001924888989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19182868569568254,0.15620429017383974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16060923797815646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14503039147298322,0.0,0.0,0.17955044011387092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5782527800800519,0.0,0.0,0.12154521811668205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854276131748695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104270979828333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5482299456287312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26660459609025144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287748106365627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,despair_pancake,2020/01/18,"You ever get so unmotivated that you can’t will yourself to even move? I dunno man. I’ve been laying on the couch doing absolutely nothing for who knows how long. I just wanna do something. Get stuff done. Make use of my time. 
I have so many drawings I want to finish. I have a mountain of schoolwork I need to do. I’d like to maybe play videogames for a bit. Going for a walk could be nice. Dancing to my favourite music sounds fun..
But I can’t make myself do any of it. All I can do is lay here motionless, hating myself for every precious minute wasted.
Why’s it gotta be like this..
Doesn’t help anything that most of my self worth is based on my (ever dwindling) productivity. 

(I’m sorry if the formatting is bad. On mobile.)",0.757327327327328,3.16665767567568,2.685585585585589,90.45295795795795,87.1081081081081,4.6402402402402405,19.708708708708702,6.139981653823899,0.05820150150150116,568,17,117,5,18,189,101,148,0.096,0.7709999999999999,0.133,0.5643,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,0,0,8,8,1,0,5,0,20,0,0,4,3,17,32,5,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,1,2,7,0,0,0,1,2,1,4,3,2,0,0,2,1,16,6,17,25,3,12,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,3,7,77,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105871365791294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585951705209124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16091622577312453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21040434754807325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538741793247207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972232406065225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729217542969906,0.34865921099895825,0.16237801557845255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013803406596172,0.0,0.10952931073665953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902747378957496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12917862270890906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591589637364317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18831011396307226,0.0,0.0,0.1705543953685647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25728911071903954,0.19539156604164792,0.19361684404894888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20483477577075795,0.0,0.1429021694326749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849235722475386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20105283351933934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836810730015088,0.0,0.21573838532448236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220622509040568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123787297784387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664513843051904,0.0,0.0,0.11367342191454158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739031482416565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,light_the_kat,2020/01/18,Stockholm syndrome? This is hard for me to write but lately I’ve been really confused about something. I’ll get straight to the point. I’m in love with this girl and this girl is in love with two people. Which really hurts me. It messed up my mental real bad because we used to be so happy at first but she’s that kind of person who flirts with anyone and doesn’t like commitment. It all went crazy for us when she was doing something kinky with this person. Then she got mad at me because I got mad at her after what she did. Screaming at me and telling me we weren’t dating because we weren’t but she made me feel like it. We continued to have more fights like that. After a while I became depressed and in that one week I was sad and couldn’t talk she told me she fell I love with this other person. I killed me because she only loved me but now two people? I don’t believe falling In love with two people but she made me feel horrible and treated me like shit. Then said how she was trying while I wasn’t and the reasons I was depressed was stupid. I tried to move on and I was but then she made me feel horrible again and told me she loved me. ( this is also when she was dating the other guy but didn’t tell me so I didn’t know.) so I stayed. After a month I found out they were dating. God that still hurts. But then again she put my feelings aside and said how I was a horrible person and I’m so stupid. And now I’m here. Not knowing how I feel I’ve never felt like this before. What do I do? I really need help..,0.4597352024922081,2.6419402616822443,1.929867601246109,97.10794781931463,85.6355140186916,4.56355140186916,16.704828660436135,5.82211442006289,-0.6218591900311532,1188,25,268,8,36,382,139,321,0.22399999999999998,0.611,0.166,-0.9766,2,0,2,0,1,0,27.0,5,0,1,1,17,31,7,1,6,0,27,7,1,8,3,57,58,36,1,2,9,0,7,5,0,0,0,3,0,7,20,23,0,0,10,0,0,5,10,16,0,5,28,10,55,15,29,28,2,44,0,5,0,6,45,13,1,1,30,188,75,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731345369319064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058856012507347365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028128990984835,0.20524534264726896,0.0,0.07162538089322516,0.09483462009121704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449968868914377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128030518130768,0.06013350818296551,0.08081968351129365,0.0,0.0,0.07159786819048583,0.0,0.09229181057277072,0.0,0.0,0.04397713790527639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464234698495775,0.0,0.0,0.08334491968746119,0.0,0.08960417096171326,0.07540285112123038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05641966923559339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802187744007729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931254180804232,0.08765366414470409,0.09251902079275236,0.0,0.09495128427978043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056144066393716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558187882801097,0.2389407761586556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482700972441658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671864209126945,0.08946302456695936,0.0,0.06241352449319928,0.06491973075632243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05703808792756501,0.06401767903340719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17506575335671046,0.2939879350640369,0.0,0.0,0.07957108930766181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461753611828729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580778005216042,0.16177094501973222,0.08654429499071374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16013639618822012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640280619258779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12960162236515668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971766626364701,0.06722100207327003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765540669439041,0.14714255863196354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16086262027650491,0.0,0.11429645400428913,0.0,0.2466756018682917,0.0,0.10125026045600796,0.07269880920984466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751884039218152,0.0,0.0,0.07802960378834763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Justaportableheater,2020/01/18,"I’m a bit lost honestly Attempt 3 at writing this. I’m on a throwaway account and please bear with me since it’s a bit difficult to put into words. 

So I’ve been diagnosed with anxiety. It’s gotten to the point where I’m pretty much not going outside during the day and just staying in my room away from anyone who could hurt me. I’m too afraid to talk about my feelings, possibly due to talking to someone a while ago who said that they would help and they just said that I was ‘silly’. 

To make the next part hopefully easier to understand I’ll call myself H. 

I feel like I’m a mask or a shell of a person and the real H is hidden inside. I’m pretty sure there’s someone blocking the real H from actually coming back out into this world. It’s like they’re telling me I have to complete certain things of a challenge to get the real H back into the actual world. 

The real H is like a ‘normal person’ would be. However they’re never actually here since it’s as if they’re trapped. On the other hand I feel like I’m controlled by people on what I should wear, eat or say. 

Sometimes I feel completely disassociated from the world and other times I feel as if everything I’m seeing is in a movie. Sometimes I feel happy as a human can possibly get (and as of recent I’ve noticed I also tend to ‘want’ to spend more money when I feel like that) and other times I have no interest in absolutely anything. 

I feel like I can keep going but at this point there’s probably no barrier between reality and a fake world. I have animals to care for (3 hamsters) which are helping I guess? 

I’ve been listening to more and more positive songs recently. I guess that’s a step forward? 

Apologies for making you read this post. I needed somewhere to drop this that wasn’t going to annoy anyone. If this breaks any rules feel free to remove.",3.77812212212212,4.955651627027027,5.413363363363364,80.65925425425428,71.91891891891892,8.184184184184184,27.217217217217218,8.626192665926032,1.9929619619619616,1442,50,281,25,27,491,188,370,0.078,0.7759999999999999,0.147,0.9620000000000001,2,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,2,4,13,22,1,1,23,0,18,4,2,3,3,60,58,23,0,11,9,0,10,6,0,3,1,5,1,3,23,16,1,4,10,2,4,8,5,6,0,0,8,16,26,17,46,45,7,46,0,2,1,0,20,22,0,8,20,173,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.2266871411049228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686387215962972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06192227528298761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0526563581617451,0.0,0.059235203831254864,0.0,0.0,0.10828439215584623,0.0,0.06371986927530772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274983402377551,0.11908072769792084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690711952537268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906664368556225,0.0,0.07894699897096788,0.0,0.0,0.06670073937932143,0.16237178153127074,0.0,0.08684647800997743,0.06182308426676581,0.0,0.0,0.04993718006416418,0.0,0.0,0.07859176485307019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923218100946157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959081329930984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3523671298739495,0.22126950516663532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090996049438795,0.0,0.13201902691672868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705999705421801,0.0,0.0,0.08242771446677938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380196225572463,0.0,0.0,0.0769073640872699,0.0,0.0,0.08289246760737957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688250447592984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269759376442625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845260832752584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337281045273444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056921367720933674,0.05741478460850885,0.059720267177393274,0.0,0.08234972115604466,0.0,0.07586683736819523,0.0,0.0881567496285044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385121938778461,0.0,0.05368154099569177,0.1352211247983694,0.0,0.08499699144555753,0.14639637773257386,0.174585701955181,0.07415837140918262,0.15755219178097835,0.08348470189154003,0.0,0.0,0.07784046246040079,0.0,0.0,0.07745287021763894,0.352537889835948,0.0,0.0,0.15290935127000532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473109677715976,0.061576967525722275,0.0,0.0,0.061703211941091025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810496221770176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312156223717551,0.0,0.15316428978797242,0.0,0.0,0.0825321198559561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297866450000556,0.0,0.0,0.12447368209057795,0.06767890757010209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05144232436767154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903023458695172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060935538236381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045671350273029855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001082305132086,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mollyyfcooke,2020/01/18,Is going to a therapist actually helpful? My parents put me in therapy when I was a teenager for my bi-polar and depression but now as an adult I feel more erratic than ever and my emotions all over the place. I don’t like putting my problems on the people around me but I fear for the worse if I keep up how I’m going. How has therapy helped you or others you know?,3.8866233766233766,4.270114025974031,5.893922077922081,80.23516883116886,71.07792207792208,9.276883116883116,30.984415584415583,9.3871,2.680918961038961,288,12,60,6,5,101,58,77,0.182,0.754,0.064,-0.89,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,0,6,4,0,1,6,0,4,0,0,2,2,15,10,10,0,2,4,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,4,1,3,0,0,1,1,13,1,10,9,2,13,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,2,4,47,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.191776993074445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494612623155456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926399564175326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210606486814637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777652793296333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22114173613266414,0.09936736051887593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22337581114921595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26344892921053664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746776645708781,0.0,0.0,0.10800327833223616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096010657264238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21821427594252826,0.0,0.0,0.13624351781371624,0.0,0.20532352293521616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880448853733841,0.0,0.3951175110529206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4494797627642211,0.2281770339167339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20027257128633805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,just_a_sushi,2020/01/18,"heavy interests for gore/violence/torture? Is there a syndrome for that? Since a young age. I have been obsessed by violence, torture and dark topics. When puberty hit me... I whole set of obsessions grew on me... rap, abuse etc... I constantly draw things following said topics...  and I was wondering if having those obsessions had a syndrome.
thanks!",3.750499999999999,7.007547383333336,4.248333333333335,77.9625,83.5,9.0,30.83333333333333,9.188382445141503,3.964333333333333,273,14,43,9,8,86,47,60,0.27699999999999997,0.649,0.07400000000000001,-0.9253,0,0,0,0,2,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,3,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,4,11,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,4,0,0,4,1,6,2,5,6,2,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,4,30,9,0,0.0,0.3924226419013888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579139170587661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36938006703479903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31505089774940154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739754138022957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049281917679448,0.0,0.0,0.2200372547885145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3697774952961453,0.0,0.0,0.35917666541422866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheBarker26,2020/01/18,"My social worker told me to ""get over"" my sexual assault This is coming from the U.K. Apologies to those elsewhere if it doesn't translate to how your system works.

So, about 6 months ago I finally sought out help for my extreme anxiety (agoraphobia) and was put on beta-blockers by my GP. I asked her for therapy, explained I'd had untreated anxiety for 10+ years and I'd only just worked up the courage to seek help. I also told her that, if I didn't get help right away, I'd likely cancel further appointments b/c that's my cycle (I convince myself i'm ""fine"" days before appointments when the reality is i'm looking for an excuse not to go because even leaving the house is hard).

Anyway, she refused to refer me to a therapist because she said i didn't have a history to warrant it - I explained I didn't have the ""history"" to warrant it because I'd suffered in silence for 10 years, but she wasn't interested in that. 

In the UK, you can get free therapy if you're referred, and I couldn't afford to go private. Instead, she sent me to a ""social worker.""

Now, social workers are a weird one. I looked up the job description for them and it's *"" Social workers work with specific groups of clients, including children, the elderly and families in crisis, and help them to solve the problems they're facing. Generally, social workers specialise in either adult or child social care. Clients may be vulnerable or in difficult situations, so social workers need to be able to work under pressure and understand other people's viewpoints.""* Basically, they're therapist-lite, without the qualifications - I think?

Anyway, this guy was probably the most unsympathetic man I've ever met. He had a dismissive attitude and wouldn't let me open up about my past. He told me that people were ""moving away from talking about their past and focusing on the future"" in the mental health field, which, sounds like a load of bs to me. He then spent 3 sessions for 3 consecutive weeks telling me how much I was missing out on my life, as if I was going to turn around and be like ""holy shit you're right i better get over it, wtf was i thinking."" 

It was awful. By the third week, i was having panic attacks to and from the meetings.

So, for that third session, I decided to go all in. Since it was my first time seeking help, I thought the faults were on my end and that I needed to listen to him more, and maybe open up a lot more to get to the real issues. I had to go back for a repeat on my beta-blockers anyway (which didn't help me) but he snagged me from the waiting area before I could see my GP (i arrive everywhere about 45 minutes early. Idk why seeing as I'm so uncomfortable, but I'm always paranoid i'll miss something)

We sat down in his office and he asked me if i'd made any progress. I said no and he sighed. He told me he'd given me ""all the tools"" to get over it. He told me it couldn't be that bad and that i'm not a lost cause, and that I must not have been really trying.

I honestly thought I was either going to cry and lunge at him. I go into fight or flight when i go to the supermarket - so, when I feel threatened, it really does feel like life or death, even though, logically, I know it isn't.

""I was sexually assaulted when I was fifteen!"" I just blurted the words out. Idk why. It just came out. I'd never told someone face-to-face before (I've disclosed it to online friends, but that's it)

The guy shook his head and sighed an apathetic ""Oh okay then"" response at me. ""That must've been hard but you need to get over it. Now, lets get back to the point.""

Now, i'm no mental health expert, but I'm pretty sure the assualt I went through plays a part in why I'm so messed up today. I'm sure that speaking about it with an empathetic professional would help. I'm sure that even a stranger, let alone a ""social worker,"" would lend an ear if someone blurted that out.

I just burst into tears and left. The worst thing was I was so distraught I couldn't see my GP, missed my repeat for beta-blockers, and so humiliated I never went back. Now i have panic attacks thinking about it. It's taken me over an hour to write this post because i started shaking somewhere around the third paragraph.

I've finally worked up the courage to seek help again now and I'm about to sign on with a new GP. I'm actually thinking of writing a note to explain what I have and my experiences and just handing it to my GP on our first meeting, as maybe it was my lack of communicating well with my previous GP that had her thinking I wasn't as serious as I feel I am? I've also filed for my police reports from 10+ years ago, which will include a number of assaults I reported, hopefully with mentions of bruising etc as proof. 

I just want someone to actually listen and take me seriously when I tell them I live in a constant state of fight or flight the moment I step out my door. Sometimes I feel like because they can't see it, they just don't want to acknowledge it...",4.442642332691385,5.2579385705645185,5.600457390467022,81.28113384689458,70.04838709677419,8.34174289841117,29.72532498796341,8.535188607288152,2.151273934761676,3890,148,775,60,67,1296,396,992,0.152,0.742,0.106,-0.9946,2,1,1,0,2,0,144.0,2,3,6,17,52,52,8,6,49,2,62,10,6,4,10,136,150,68,1,22,30,0,7,5,1,6,4,7,1,6,47,45,0,2,21,1,2,18,22,28,3,6,49,20,109,23,126,83,13,120,0,5,6,0,86,53,1,15,51,505,156,18,0.04763369750503477,0.0,0.09296723504288304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844487975707335,0.0,0.0,0.04933414504368378,0.0,0.07618530137039081,0.03963505218013672,0.0,0.0,0.03239254773251152,0.0,0.07287929642437624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848081794196099,0.08906215418140431,0.10838041507164367,0.08950685362283471,0.10988211938609137,0.03977214775583005,0.1451852993953672,0.0,0.12159830456756215,0.0,0.0,0.042128134531834366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054480260183952516,0.04856572922590556,0.0489329286435317,0.0,0.04103221262476453,0.0,0.051475104821883055,0.0,0.03803163146852775,0.0,0.05232338000316117,0.030719794253272974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04168456968447888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042189317558992405,0.0,0.05312416411739746,0.09438482387392486,0.04308740647395199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04659489634985787,0.04490481071723183,0.0,0.0963401147640605,0.06805904603051928,0.0,0.10436077460005168,0.0,0.08103439752819387,0.0,0.0,0.03680167653189432,0.0,0.19909312750414665,0.0,0.21657062408880828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943296989784759,0.0,0.0,0.08534087350562974,0.0,0.04888591596222859,0.10126478599147362,0.0,0.0,0.2554229068989973,0.0,0.0,0.04731100951809482,0.046909596964782266,0.05496289149816188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04971720457212092,0.047269094773646436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026178234419957862,0.0,0.0,0.050437207894868635,0.051754151713538164,0.14612604894192716,0.06729017848719862,0.1163570926498104,0.0,0.04206142758673916,0.0,0.080000618101913,0.0,0.05199780772391551,0.04049646622163813,0.0,0.04507215631388643,0.0,0.0,0.09570890309581706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960071270397094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03802076289653634,0.050627082063016714,0.03501624846968105,0.10595934940678134,0.07347608808037402,0.046004921874719266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03227782619919243,0.03622757340919538,0.0,0.1117757615373767,0.0,0.051582652528016984,0.0909435082675497,0.06604641641628071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04502924071393872,0.0,0.045619915039670375,0.04846059498599032,0.05135718240614803,0.04557901544095317,0.0,0.04788502250809172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05421757610425754,0.06103073270451809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135783480639662,0.09062110866851864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183155902362733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488953059742919,0.03940308680921282,0.05354227176934902,0.0,0.38845244762726333,0.121079631956475,0.03667074751128043,0.04711094482297079,0.0,0.03371537626335918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13468258853052226,0.0,0.0358146124369884,0.03828616172215435,0.08326790231921012,0.0,0.1089465688298168,0.11061278834051967,0.03164571204169878,0.15260874998410193,0.046799865949204614,0.07563167016670856,0.02777559207523399,0.0,0.04515117557271518,0.2730962355799315,0.0,0.032340153847895056,0.05181178452490811,0.0,0.04958835899530936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056191177870032284,0.0,0.07641775783639553,0.0,0.0428284146341231,0.08831382961752285,0.12894600915179444,0.0,0.0,0.0459171845823941,0.0,0.17338949549132268,0.0,0.0,0.06767522406005848,0.0,0.0,0.09202361838337124
mentalhealth,Throwwwwwdaway,2020/01/18,"I'm confused all the time - help I'm going to post this on a few other mental health subs, so you may see it elsewhere.

This isn't going to be a depressive post, but one that presents my situation in hopes of receiving actionable advice.


Where to begin? I guess I should state my objective and then my obstacles. My objective is inner peace, a sense of harmony, the genuine belief that my life is enough.

My obstacles:

I'm twenty-one. I have virtually no sense of identity. I don't do anything because I enjoy it. I do things because I have to, because they're means to an end, be it wealth, success, or any other obscure, praised status. I've grown sick of the framework, but it's the way I think.

There are many things I want to say, but I don't know what the proper order would be, so I'm just going to get into it.

My grades make me unhappy. I have a 4.0. I don't enjoy college or even remember most of what I learn. Yet I fear dropping the GPA because, if I did, then I really wouldn't have anything to identify with. I don't constantly think about my GPA, but I struggled with a quiz the other day, and level of frustration and agitation it caused me by challenging my sense of self was disconcerting.

I envy and aspire to be like people that enjoy things and others for what they are, instead of what they convey.

I'm a computer science major. I'm learning web development outside of school. I'm trying to force myself to fall in love with tech because that's going to be my career. I'm not in love. I don't dislike it, either. Everything's just there. There's just never a connection, a feeling.

Either I'm apathetic or bombarded by heavily critical thoughts. It feels numb or like a coffin full of needles. Obviously, I have positive emotions, but they're much less frequent.

I've gone to therapy, so I'm not looking to be told to go back. It helped. I've improved my life and continue using techniques I learned there.

Nothing I do, nothing I attempt to enjoy, is ever good enough for my brain. 

I just want interests and people to call home. But my brain keeps telling me I have to take a long, convoluted route to success before I can have that. The worst thing is that success is unlikely if you're not interested in your business or profession. 

I want to spend my life living, not whatever is going on now.

I just don't know how to get out of this situation.",3.285321876704856,5.075830457446814,5.002340425531916,80.66294871794872,74.21276595744679,8.139661756683033,28.434260774686308,8.841846274778883,2.393633933442444,1865,77,356,39,39,633,219,470,0.111,0.6990000000000001,0.19,0.993,0,0,0,0,0,1,66.0,0,2,2,6,21,25,1,3,19,0,38,10,2,4,4,70,80,26,1,9,24,0,2,2,0,4,6,1,1,1,30,12,0,1,13,0,2,11,14,7,0,1,5,5,51,18,48,65,12,45,2,1,2,2,15,12,0,13,18,246,81,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241874709834637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431504457133183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15565627307276111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07272324346808369,0.0,0.2882638031075063,0.0,0.08047736208382912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111565869704388,0.09657285255319717,0.0,0.0,0.0971557875812238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220325021272113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06099381107458843,0.0,0.08145832400378887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10638547126640367,0.08376642250085492,0.1954449485025449,0.0,0.0624666739650133,0.08554956808951363,0.0,0.0,0.08499897097615786,0.0,0.0,0.10642449461479793,0.09564111514511872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882429961215533,0.0,0.32249893068305074,0.07932601143378139,0.0,0.0,0.10418632328868012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053005522025113,0.0,0.0,0.12678483780746494,0.0,0.09486761835882153,0.09393548513064283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406365301073998,0.0,0.0,0.10395318870386508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20040585558542173,0.09241028722729516,0.0,0.08351249837813335,0.08369694188054849,0.07942017036521166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17071738728908406,0.0,0.06313033358012919,0.095885400734453,0.0,0.10302118440092743,0.0,0.0,0.09531054342673774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952437331096449,0.0,0.07294297933646919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18149678811031514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408726623819062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13113442791430874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18115567156651585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06058792174245235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713637377628236,0.0,0.0,0.07521077319512502,0.0,0.09571614187673906,0.07536496948755342,0.0,0.0986635805288033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126151745600315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887155651339746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07110951612114184,0.0,0.08266374866905354,0.0,0.1081561025709426,0.0,0.25132884233253683,0.12120119279597966,0.0,0.0750829215093509,0.0551481302756824,0.0,0.0,0.0903715915803968,0.0,0.06421101709401826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168345241424431,0.0,0.0,0.16735044148439504,0.0750701683765445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06718420372086092,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AsymmetricSquid,2020/01/18,"My friend’s new roommate talks to himself So this semester, one of my friends got a new roommate. He seemed normal at first, but we very quickly realized that something was wrong with him. I thought it was just aspergers or autism or something like that, but after a few days occasionally hanging out with him, I’m not so sure. When we first met him, we went out to dinner and introduced ourselves to him and had some conversation, but he kept  speaking up randomly and out of turn, and he kept returning to a really small thing that I barely remembered saying at the beginning of the conversation. Just now we went out for dinner again, but instead of talking to us, he just kept to himself, whispering to himself. He was looking around all over the place, and occasionally laughing at something nobody else had heard, or whispering to himself, or singing a song that I’ve never heard. He never joined in our conversation once. It was weird and frankly a bit creepy, and I am concerned for my friend’s roommate’s mental health, and for the safety of my friend. Does anyone know what’s going on or if there’s anything I can do about it?",9.188457943925233,7.682337845794393,8.526093457943926,72.05044859813086,60.72897196261682,11.550654205607474,39.62429906542056,10.355215969177356,3.992238878504672,905,39,165,16,10,286,118,214,0.043,0.877,0.079,0.8294,0,0,3,0,0,0,24.0,6,0,0,2,13,9,0,0,9,0,9,3,0,0,4,48,26,21,0,2,14,0,0,1,4,0,1,7,0,0,10,19,2,3,5,2,0,4,3,2,0,3,16,8,22,7,32,10,4,32,0,0,1,0,34,14,0,9,15,120,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964463900027628,0.0,0.1135076115901639,0.12279016005597004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15058778196035544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895577004624748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207066351017052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11522583521558355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346525231556916,0.0,0.0,0.4262686719705203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839085149945202,0.0,0.1103181115657254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661698158151307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580470696122665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738739648885285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158294962648264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390046405476062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127658128595441,0.26643428777828426,0.0,0.0,0.1351456556095022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14689479720985393,0.09346738657477133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441112689234468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883638051000078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625189607478715,0.0,0.0,0.10969034607731568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556958173231414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31856410457793805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300007987876637,0.0,0.0,0.2217316281502467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163696410600784,0.0,0.0,0.10950388215647887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003216336295602,0.0,0.0,0.16591715428567985,0.0,0.0,0.11380967710033806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557316840923451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508087536926382,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-stonedbaloney,2020/01/18,"How To Forgive My last relationship in particular was well, awful. And he did many awful things to me. 

I've noticed its changed the way I perceive some stuff and I always turn on the trauma responses. 

I feel like it hinders any relationship I try to start or have, just because I over think or get worried. How can I break that barrier?",3.2614358974358986,5.5302219384615405,4.610384615384618,81.30378205128206,75.76923076923076,7.410256410256411,29.294871794871803,8.344100000000001,2.303871794871795,266,12,50,5,6,88,51,65,0.18100000000000002,0.723,0.09699999999999999,-0.7003,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,2,0,13,9,6,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,8,3,6,7,1,7,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,3,3,34,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19451083380398845,0.0,0.0,0.1589679115306913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14250070121329236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24729190000887644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819838136179225,0.1670014427019567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12213233017668047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905493100702421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420555223421675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23700056499430275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661424919043993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5019512899478401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654597531295232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26760448443271145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553027811739975,0.1497868859628668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587107861423694,0.2542687054632684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18555142058310956,0.0,0.0,0.21018240629846166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23739924982105645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tunaeffect,2020/01/18,"none of my friends probably like me i feel like i’m annoying them with how desperate i am to get their attention . one of them is someone one i used(?) to have a crush on. i constantly asked for physical contact from her, sometimes forgetting to ask and they tell me to stop. i do. one of my other friends told me that she feels uncomfortable with me trying to have physical contact with her. so i stop and ask hesitantly if i can pat her in the head. she never talks to me anymore and rather talks to another group of people. she never even talks to me. whenever i get jealous, i just think that i’m being emotionally abusive. i think i’m trying to force her to stay with me. that i want her for myself. i think it’s partially true. i don’t want to force her to be friends with me but i also don’t want to let her go.",1.2936651583710417,3.3854760414201164,3.3687156282631427,88.61689523146538,81.48520710059171,7.2900800556909156,24.14235990254089,8.313332769828598,1.5424901496693348,637,24,139,14,17,216,87,169,0.133,0.81,0.057,-0.8474,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,4,0,6,8,2,0,2,0,11,1,1,2,3,29,30,8,0,5,4,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,2,6,0,0,1,5,2,0,3,1,2,39,6,27,26,1,9,0,0,0,0,28,2,0,1,7,101,44,0,0.0,0.15703800890475475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599204298058378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13897955344947532,0.0,0.0,0.13144388297430384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3717205092375298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322845547819865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908945364352702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754129846406228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403222670449733,0.09468647104266648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30719979921812635,0.0,0.13849316697564248,0.0,0.07532543182166278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136024088967574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135530941720954,0.0,0.12950451851887146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044457538599932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26943722846419715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918864201045038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14290033870154656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230055600017752,0.0,0.13108526707155338,0.0,0.0,0.14126980888660154,0.0,0.22161844185457447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195914507776671,0.11584564112456035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25477848713449464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266474740698189,0.0,0.1799716698621337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11447184608188653,0.0,0.0,0.2345262524187428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SplitSocio,2020/01/18,"I need out of this hell I have a girlfriend, I’m a girl and my mother doesn’t approve. She found about because she went through my phone and now I’m living in hell. I’m not allowed to see my girlfriend at all, and I’m not allowed to see her for a year. It’s been 4 months and I wish I could say things have gotten better but they have gotten so so so much worse. I’ve been seeing her at my school even though I’m not supposed to be. My mother has threaded to change my school so I would never be able to see her. I’m not a girly girl and my mother has used that to make belittling comments. Stuff like “when are you gonna wear makeup, is your development just delayed?” And that stuff really really hurts. I’m posting on here as a last resort. I don’t have any other ideas but I need some help. I’m so afraid to be who I am.",-0.15716666666666512,1.8505231722222248,1.8177777777777813,98.06000000000004,86.72222222222223,4.488888888888889,16.77777777777778,5.6839178017228535,-0.7109222222222225,641,14,153,4,20,212,102,180,0.109,0.83,0.061,-0.8812,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,2,12,6,2,1,5,0,18,1,1,4,2,29,40,16,0,5,7,3,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,2,9,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,6,5,23,2,17,28,3,14,2,1,4,0,20,5,2,1,8,99,32,2,0.1508186278180874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256183870741736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193763567001302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13338682015930992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15954611039514402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041640208930407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961428126949133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536484085483152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010905471062322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145446038431702,0.1702558731001484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293731116584945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368236340876791,0.0,0.1331756114887226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067260519441144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038198983075718,0.0,0.11086904486002368,0.22366020302243547,0.11632062344679038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14444255533036415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19323654982389274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993702625741373,0.0,0.3052730063483217,0.4807316792697867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3453024916222848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019719476849062,0.0,0.14817853608327225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302588706485793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981037897454146,0.0,0.0,0.17343397886455425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536970665424749,0.1071372260041414,0.0,0.0,0.0971222515319007
mentalhealth,spaceismyalltimehigh,2020/01/18,"Need some help I believe my boyfriend has been struggling for a while now, and the other day he was saying and I believe almost committing suicide. I was terrified I was going to lose him and completely drained by the time I felt he was actually okay enough for me to not be in contact with him for a short time. He came over and I felt better seeing him so that I could make sure he was actually okay. 
But ever since then I've just been debating our relationship and I don't want to say it doesnt feel the same but something feels off. And I dont want this to be the end of our relationship I love him too much for that..",5.711495016611295,4.9735826744186085,6.4157475083056505,81.88813953488375,67.2170542635659,9.85204872646733,30.831672203765226,9.23628265651192,2.2772648947951275,491,16,108,8,7,162,80,129,0.10400000000000001,0.777,0.11900000000000001,0.4501,0,0,1,0,0,1,7.0,2,0,0,2,5,7,0,1,6,2,14,1,0,1,3,27,26,11,1,4,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,8,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,10,7,18,5,14,13,4,14,0,1,1,1,17,4,0,2,8,77,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.3002908246753789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406881833048422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3466956341780799,0.0,0.13607689047398752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17597514061402347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16131954797603945,0.0,0.0,0.12284489231250482,0.0,0.0,0.09922713465575424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803230706462615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13627451603177626,0.15897877080621362,0.0,0.0,0.13917540752091895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559273381894062,0.0,0.2954599428148568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744232750131188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10312928436333303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721302671991275,0.0,0.0,0.1388648854545018,0.0,0.10270291363426552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310498935617708,0.11408542805699952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33037666229909163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447116973972894,0.0,0.0,0.12260670130159974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272747912448524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844913970546228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16084814309736267,0.0,0.1682981442726153,0.0,0.14501146760859587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17943430169288332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815015272239683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,voidofme,2020/01/18,question (pls respond NEED TO KNOW) hey guys. i was wondering if anyone knows if a therapist could write a note excusing me from work due to being highly unstable at the moment? i work at culvers if that helps at all. PLEASE respond im desperate for any info.,1.4524285714285732,4.1643659,3.479714285714288,82.83700000000002,90.0,6.857142857142858,25.142857142857146,7.957251820313856,2.2344857142857144,205,9,36,5,7,69,40,50,0.098,0.7929999999999999,0.109,0.1381,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,1,12,7,3,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,7,4,1,6,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,5,2,21,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18069451586328747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857932878309652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212150871627774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26309846680163856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17810237899327397,0.28074124970476394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870165327215691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920587434944056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19702343782230172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916739925673205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976603006513117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.308514236091068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881553136397023,0.38688566521291096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,halmack,2020/01/18,"First post Hi all

I'm making this post regarding ""episodes"" I had when I was younger. If it is of any help, I have struggled with OCD throughout my teens and still am, although I doubt this is relevant.

While living in France between the ages of 8-14, I would often have periods lasting weeks where I would question every single thing around me.

 It's hard to describe but I would ask myself questions such as ""Why is the floor like this ?, Why can I touch ?, What is hearing ?"" , it was as if I was being overwhelmed by my senses while also having an existential crisis if that makes sense. 

Something else to note is that I used to always call what I felt ""The feeling"" as I had no other way of describing it at the time. I also remember it being triggered by the cramped attic in my house as well as the emptiness and quietness of the area, as it was a very rural.

I am now 17 and haven't had anything similar happen for a good few years now, but it has always bugged me because I've never heard of anything similar from anybody I know, I never knew why it happened in the first place or what I was even experiencing. I also worry that it could creep up on me again as this was usually what would happen back when these ""episodes"" were much more frequent. 

I know that I would be able to get much more help out of a professional (Which I plan to seek help from), but I've never actually taken the time to write any of this down. If anybody reading this can relate or can think of what this sounds like please let me know, I would appreciate it very much.

Much love to all of ya !!!",4.884999999999998,5.3659188694267534,5.414528662420384,84.20650636942679,68.90445859872611,7.936050955414013,28.438853503184713,7.734863291789972,1.5894667515923566,1231,40,251,13,20,396,168,314,0.063,0.8170000000000001,0.11900000000000001,0.9602,0,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,0,3,16,8,0,3,13,0,36,2,0,4,5,44,56,27,0,11,9,0,4,2,0,6,1,4,0,0,30,6,0,0,10,1,1,0,5,3,1,2,14,9,31,5,39,31,10,39,0,1,0,1,13,13,0,10,25,195,61,2,0.09325397078172258,0.0,0.09100242343595304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22372550022723564,0.15518954822047346,0.0,0.0,0.12683179589297672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534801444001943,0.08301580498565596,0.08717987432019197,0.0,0.0,0.071706547307056,0.0,0.056846755036474614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522273058712424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074455707524541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790172649995772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06159336820218288,0.0,0.07857049239438127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715200959554892,0.0,0.08953843612593271,0.0,0.0,0.15864355981624034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048721350817745805,0.0,0.0,0.07821700628703268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473925351589279,0.0,0.08353724087385296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510400256315723,0.0,0.18751851271694872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760256176432284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374983061882627,0.07601443262878406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535850327413496,0.0,0.09111835936787988,0.0,0.08234496469220606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416534950860792,0.0,0.12449549925150075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27420959385586463,0.0,0.21576963357541912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974305513709819,0.10236485627648242,0.0,0.0,0.17862305246089386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20893157889868008,0.0,0.09327920663060184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056385701205285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179146268457151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744727415273485,0.0,0.0,0.09748929786886766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06195379449162981,0.059753379046623124,0.0,0.0,0.10875428058278024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08054148942512794,0.10270607399431148,0.1538885844816158,0.0,0.07402066139148228,0.07480271036829284,0.0,0.08384651908443318,0.0,0.2524416117096554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470393398430237,0.0,0.3974696715372241,0.0,0.0,0.06005249973189841
mentalhealth,beomkyutiee,2020/01/18,"How can u avoid a friend in the same friendship group who is constantly making u feel bad? I have a friend at school and i’ve always known that she didn’t like me that much but it was never stated bluntly because we ended up with the same group of friends. Recently, i’m starting to get mad because she keeps trying to claim to others that i’m “bicurious” eventho im not. Many of my friends( including her) r bi and ive always been the one straight one but ive never thought of that as a big thing but for some reason she’s been talking about my sexuality to other people and it makes me uncomfortable because frankly it’s my business and false rumors will begin to spread. 

She also physically pushes me alot but plays it off in a very amusing and joking way to the rest if my friends. Sometimes i think im being overdramatic but I notice the way she treats others compared to me over the years and there’s a more aggressive and hostile side to the way I’m treated.

Ive also noticed that if someone compliments me for my grades or something she would begin to give the person reasons why im dumb (that’s happened quite alot). She also tends to guilt trip me into doing things all the time like buying her food or inviting her into something she’s not part of.

Eventho this has been happening for a few years, I’m starting to get sick of people like her treating me like crap. And im tired of sucking up to people like her. I want this year to be a new start but it seems as if one problem has built up to a bigger one and now i can’t focus because i dont know what to do.",3.7702375201288265,4.765327046296299,4.87243156199678,85.22007246376813,71.74691358024691,6.992807300053678,27.66720343531938,7.079830092131019,1.3351230810520662,1249,44,254,11,23,411,169,324,0.11599999999999999,0.7440000000000001,0.14,0.6757,0,1,2,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,0,1,8,27,6,2,19,0,21,5,1,5,3,50,46,26,0,6,13,0,1,5,5,2,2,0,0,1,20,13,1,2,8,3,1,2,7,10,0,4,6,1,35,17,38,36,11,36,0,0,0,1,26,14,3,9,21,173,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21333948262078584,0.14798517778206682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424852539201117,0.21683102365772536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609615882169137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042192479355317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876101223603874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044963070018516085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752826716647962,0.0,0.3435155465103585,0.0,0.09291911530412422,0.0853048075917985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15727188124567404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842163387597432,0.0,0.0,0.07904048192242459,0.0,0.0,0.04887076541556254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172209205595048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871603984326813,0.09015582849353096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536998780139994,0.0,0.1371686343175068,0.08588416272973026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20248303505564025,0.0,0.0,0.2410310866652513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962969339630984,0.0,0.18494785810065006,0.07764573860819374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508906046730674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458251125770052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182859087885104,0.08780254961762071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999668359315839,0.0,0.08095383279179598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534572672118177,0.13691736963519746,0.08794893864934004,0.0,0.18882437422989934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714744164243261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815542215629628,0.05697944560500489,0.0,0.07059638842347801,0.05185278819079744,0.10220601998455482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037412786703227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337230436675166,0.05245017345434323,0.2117531920384746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024083498065629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631696535837285,0.0,0.0,0.17179404059718953
mentalhealth,FlowersOnJupiter,2020/01/19,"I can’t stop eating Just recently I’ve stopped cutting and my depression is not as severe as it used to be as well as my anxiety thanks to therapy my psychiatrist and my medication. However, I now find myself in a circle of self hatred from wanting food, eating too much, disgust and the circle starts again. My therapist isn’t helping me much on this problem and my psychiatrist just gave me tips on healthy eating. I don’t know what to do: I can’t stop eating when distressed. I don’t know what to do, any advice.",7.702352941176468,6.3835343333333325,8.446392156862746,70.84076470588238,63.50980392156863,11.689411764705882,37.066666666666656,10.793553405168565,3.9363701960784314,410,17,77,9,5,139,62,102,0.23800000000000002,0.6559999999999999,0.106,-0.9342,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,2,1,2,0,9,6,0,1,0,16,16,9,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,4,5,3,3,0,0,0,6,5,1,0,1,0,14,2,13,14,2,11,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,8,56,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887974960193665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360676845389312,0.0,0.11655131995289875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122332060801667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6235896684482881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392499033666704,0.0,0.1842285267715164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212048690733262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674608798589872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348184722886926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22399722166225225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578336159732247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15043239130593733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15893971326323655,0.17211802305916504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783780302491516,0.0,0.0,0.3821273370435333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14026820938551576,0.17423146249265076,0.1768961435863439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158598578612407,0.0,0.0,0.08986305126115149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369856324635839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheMoustacheLady,2020/01/19,"idk where to write this. It may not be a mental issue but point me to the right direction. The person in my head is different from who i am in reality Like when i'm fantasizing, when i'm thinking about myself or setting expectations, the persona of the girl is very different from who i am in reality. As such, i'm not able to set realistic expectations and goals for myself. How can i make the girl in my head and the girl i am tally? 

I don't hate the person i really am. I want to be a better version of myself. I kinda hate the girl in my head. So it's not a ""maybe the girl in your head is who you really want to be"" situation.",2.457985074626865,3.448258231343281,5.39868656716418,80.22355223880598,74.8955223880597,8.942089552238807,23.84776119402985,9.3871,1.8178680597014931,489,14,108,12,10,179,69,134,0.009000000000000001,0.847,0.14400000000000002,0.9561,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,0,2,7,4,2,0,12,0,13,4,4,2,0,17,22,9,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,7,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,17,2,18,18,1,13,0,0,0,0,13,9,0,3,3,79,23,1,0.15663493316510002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138530869581702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273003342228446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092891365403231,0.643010522426819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16348617519113748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652391640838713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455503417789352,0.0,0.15736084353029473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157851171700965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735351638974953,0.0,0.0,0.1480706407256646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20068869810450574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376537708426078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760642276240084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036534053079828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292402239984514,0.1847746837039147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mxter0,2020/01/19,"My dog knew? Hi, Im new to making posts, so please bare with me. 
I’m Em, I suffer with trauma induced anxiety and depression. Earlier today I had a panic attack and it was quite bad. I haven’t had one like that in a while. I was in my room when it happened (I live in the loft) and my dog was downstairs in the living room. Apparently he was whining and the door and doing little barks, so my sister knew something was wrong. She opened the door so he could come upstairs and he starts going frantic at my ladders, alerting my sister what was going on. He’s not a loud dog, he rarely ever barks, but he is going absolutely ballistic at this point, I’ve never heard him like that. He tries jumping up my ladders to get to me but can’t because my sister is sat on them, which seems to worry him even more. He then proceeded to get a flannel from the bathroom and bring it downstairs so my mum notices, he’s a very naughty dog so she noticed straight away. Normally he’s a bugger for dropping stuff, but he did as he was told, at that point my mum knew something was going on. She closed him in the living room and came upstairs. A little while later as I’m calming down I ask if he can come up, I wanted to see what he would do. Bronn is a very very energetic dog, he’s a young border collie, so he leaps on my mums bed as usual but he seems frantic. He climbed all over me, circled me, and finally laid down with his head smushed against my leg. 
The point of this post is really to see if anyone knows how he knew? I find it really strange, we were in completely different parts of the house. It really meant a lot to me what he did, I’ve never known him like that (he’s a complete tosser) and it’s something I’ll never forget. Thanks for reading!",2.009152158774373,3.820155746518111,3.576398850974929,89.40340050487465,77.8857938718663,6.158809192200558,23.475017409470748,7.04035,0.7938390668523678,1359,44,286,15,32,450,175,359,0.094,0.8420000000000001,0.064,-0.775,2,0,3,0,0,0,43.0,1,0,1,2,10,15,1,3,19,0,24,2,2,3,5,50,55,30,0,6,7,6,0,3,0,1,0,2,7,0,17,19,0,0,11,1,0,10,6,10,0,1,22,4,35,5,39,31,4,59,0,3,2,0,41,30,0,5,19,172,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07444474051191245,0.0,0.0,0.06804402580006594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909752053430767,0.1107084216290983,0.09142945690898514,0.0,0.08125290348697409,0.05932154930089222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130098756165467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765433100193972,0.20406319824587865,0.0,0.0,0.07769709848549666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838161769057883,0.0,0.0,0.10167214035099037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427480383127235,0.08802584414664529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660243945665296,0.08894299032074443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168481957102096,0.0,0.22122255158601806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605421401031993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998719665816646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228698398895336,0.0,0.0,0.10511553235077094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0534810834919626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14262772546972755,0.1950678543531961,0.2577894312279395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273265707628108,0.0,0.0,0.06495767341379892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22516305367943945,0.09398621115361827,0.0,0.0,0.09534679812065926,0.0,0.22158466337562752,0.0,0.0,0.06594230497768026,0.0,0.0,0.11417669998784752,0.0,0.10538129127931507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068212576845914,0.2759788009651853,0.0,0.18639931524738626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350513519564747,0.09734006895089999,0.0,0.18702501049063708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15509289424551134,0.17718153803065756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22475060134708186,0.0,0.0,0.06887916213054328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140094386380577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959341218954264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224204168344098,0.0929874435767653,0.0,0.06606963786540096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071773301403991,0.24088206737517304,0.05739816190368874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882682107771264,0.0,0.06912888490168638,0.10639729207950352,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Temutsi,2020/01/19,"I keep getting too easly attracted to my friends (At first I want to apologize for my english)  
Well, I feel bad for even writing that here, but I can't handle it. I'm just falling in 'love' in anyone who wants to talk with me for more than week or two. It isn't even real feeling, I mean, it is too short period of time and I'm feeling it to anyone (of course by 'anyone' I mean 'girls/females'). Everytime I get attached to someone, then my only thoughs are about hugging them, resting together or spending time together.  
At first I thought it could be because of end of my relationship which lasted for 3 years, but I don't feel anything to her anymore. Well, thats why I'm asking for some help, because I don't want to destroy any of my relations (did it already once) and I can't sleep well or stop blaming myself for being like that.",5.1911242603550285,5.132864946745563,6.01283431952663,82.05428106508877,68.17159763313609,8.653491124260354,34.059763313609466,8.238735603445708,2.538194792899408,652,29,132,8,10,215,101,169,0.09699999999999999,0.7509999999999999,0.153,0.8245,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,2,11,10,1,0,0,0,11,3,1,0,0,25,29,9,0,4,6,0,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,11,3,0,2,7,0,1,1,5,2,3,3,2,4,20,8,26,24,3,17,0,0,0,2,11,5,0,4,12,92,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051048076832355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927503233021032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13526288176249246,0.28610255432523474,0.0,0.11223788887751436,0.0,0.12750685223218994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388050094836555,0.16628495626625275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889684082712607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080163856837355,0.0,0.0,0.18016948427785487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758528555739363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23202764510515986,0.0,0.0,0.1053750827066535,0.0,0.1425169771742181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141978190969616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123028206960773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11117658868277644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663358529795972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309789233521645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29713881794962865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14525159762372536,0.0,0.10373124009573004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15524242655600395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643252206147744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648915597611905,0.0,0.11556336045766168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11402869581547333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962564312785833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340031272973065,0.10827894609845133,0.15906097699747349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323385284350167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241340228493694,0.0,0.10940435750649076,0.0,0.3678947395525027,0.0,0.12307135307895918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783111089798064
mentalhealth,a-granola-bar,2020/01/19,"Academic disaster, I want to die So I have this huge essay deadline tomorrow, my essay is worth 100% of the module, so the last 2 days I was working extremely hard and did a lot of research, changed a lot of parts of the essay (it is a scientific essay therefore a lot of details and hard to remember) and now, 18 hours before the deadline Microsoft Word broke down an no of my progress was saved. All the research I done, every small detail I changed, nothing was saved. Even though it was supposed to be saved every 10 minutes... I feel miserable, I feel like I have no hope and that my life hates me. The worst part is that I am going to fail the module because of it and there is nothing I can do, technical issue is not an extenuating circumstance at my university. The only valid excuse to submit it late would be probably me dying... And at this point I don't see many options. Pulling an all nighter is gonna be awful since I am already exhausted but oh well, life fucking hates me and wants me to fail, I am literally on a huge mental breakdown and I am shaking and crying and there is nothing I can do just to sit down and write again but I feel hopeless...",5.3949350649350665,5.594530809523807,6.3740043290043324,78.7524350649351,67.74458874458874,9.1974025974026,33.38311688311689,9.04235418022936,2.810293506493507,911,39,178,15,14,304,124,231,0.166,0.736,0.098,-0.9484,0,0,0,0,0,2,28.0,0,0,0,4,10,17,3,2,16,1,28,4,0,1,2,35,40,16,2,4,4,0,5,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,8,11,0,0,4,0,1,3,4,11,1,0,6,6,24,6,19,29,8,20,0,5,1,1,2,9,1,5,8,129,32,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355054933625248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485367438400553,0.0,0.10448807987279682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25979812314551376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348827073311869,0.07919153956201144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548801804319664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566020976277534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110383652790958,0.0,0.2069173535096729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862639918788023,0.08772357965425487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352045513573468,0.0,0.0,0.06978627934524292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21999740964273048,0.2424659832482872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219614835659822,0.12092669544747282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281643340552729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10009295314796908,0.13851622500465838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17346512114859153,0.059990618621518624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131834947010593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449316368173825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12374679557611562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3534705363411253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338986092214166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26594642104093696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607938738278788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13239197856530546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391009060256883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978503860902357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10157591168061593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206438234988636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448533752746922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040595076625664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939500687167098,0.0,0.0,0.087228858685294,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ame_93,2020/01/19,"What is this? I hate being like this. A little backstory: my husband had an affair 2 years ago, it emotionally broke me. We separated for 6 months and decided to try things again. 
So far he hasn’t done anything in the past 2 years to lead me to believe he is cheating again. 

But, I have some many doubts, trust issues, anxiety, insecurities and a feeling of hopelessness. 

I feel the need to go through his phone all the time, I hate when he talk to other females even if they are just friends.  He hasn’t done anything to make me believe he is having an affair. But sometimes I feel like my anxiety makes me see things, like him being sketchy with his phone, is he really being sneaky or is my anxiety making me see it that way? 

Sometimes I want him to cheat again to justify my feelings and prove that I was right about feeling this way.  How can I trust again? How can I cope with this anxiety and insecurities? How can I let go of having to be in control? I love him but how long will I go feeling like this? I want to trust him, I want to hope for the best.",3.8908450704225364,4.862050572769956,4.90574647887324,85.18256338028169,71.44131455399061,8.121314553990612,27.815023474178403,8.447377352677275,1.7594747417840386,824,29,175,13,15,270,109,213,0.11599999999999999,0.705,0.179,0.9459,0,0,0,0,0,1,25.0,1,0,1,3,13,20,4,3,8,0,24,1,0,9,2,38,46,15,0,6,6,1,6,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,13,7,0,1,8,0,0,4,2,9,0,0,4,8,31,11,21,36,3,23,0,2,2,1,22,5,0,5,16,121,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933871950655138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3429171850207573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18443963039298172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25251739931181105,0.11760513626401232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569024769876302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22936247984661426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605786205857933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740177702481694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399801032013504,0.16011828890390914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658101778916617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19106709419128007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22128165829605767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130567253259667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696657813281534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459389204671043,0.0,0.2189968818377705,0.11231841068096204,0.0,0.09917385737647233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114289386376238,0.0,0.22441245371450927,0.11361615900490316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944908653413558,0.0,0.0,0.08309465926972344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069785706678048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179160641494467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570276148365033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786023376053087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22166998550987496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007347386122222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14890180097412636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534590970295316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608467057695872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198296239298084,0.17790370841574166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433216619663222
mentalhealth,ChRSamsara,2020/01/19,"“Bad” things keep happening to me and I don’t know how to get past them. (I just finished and this turned out longer than I expected, thank you if you if you take the time of reading me) 

I’m not sure if this is the right place to talk about this, sorry if it isn’t. The last couple of months I’ve been dealing with a bunch of things that have really taken a toll at my energy. 
I consider myself a lucky person and my friends joke that I’m Domino from deadpool (silly but is a cute reference). Lately I haven’t been feeling as lucky, in the last three months of 2019 I got into a car accident in the highway (construction site badly signed and at night) and literally nothing happened to me, just a stiff neck, my car had considerable damage but the insurance covered everything, this is an example of what I mean to have bad things happen to me but getting the best outcome out of them. In that same period of time my uncle went missing and was found 3 days later (he was the lucky one in this one, he is totally fine) and just last night someone tried to rob my car, that I’ve just gotten back from the shop, luckily(ha) because of this there weren’t any valuables inside, they tried to take the battery but they couldn’t. 
Friends and relatives keep saying that everything is fine, at least nothing worse happened in each case, that I’m safe and I get the sentiment but I’m so done with this stuff happening to me, I still get angry and scared, I’m scared to drive, to go outside too late or alone, I’m even scared to be in my apartment now and I don’t know what to do or why this kind of stuff keep happening to me. Should just accept that I’m like cursed? Or can I do anything to stop this kind of things from happening?  
I think the worst part is that for example I’m sure I got the trauma from my accident but since I didn’t have any physical injuries I had to deal with everything in silence, like I didn’t get the chance to recover mentally along an injury? Like I have to recover myself from all this things in silence and to keep going because I have other obligations and I just wish I could stop time and have a moment to heal myself or to even cry them out of my system and if I say something people keep telling me that it wasn’t a big deal because I’m fine physically but this things just keep eating me alive and I’m scared and far away from home and my parents and maybe all this things aren’t really that big of a deal anyways and I’m just being silly? 

What should I do?",6.195042735042733,5.389118984220907,6.489151873767259,81.98383957922421,66.25838264299803,10.035765943458252,30.612097304404998,9.348350401419415,2.344230243261013,1963,60,415,32,27,634,211,507,0.14800000000000002,0.725,0.128,-0.9534,3,1,1,0,0,0,39.0,0,3,5,1,19,35,0,4,25,0,38,4,1,1,5,90,86,39,0,11,25,1,1,3,2,2,2,2,1,1,37,29,1,10,9,3,1,7,11,11,0,3,17,3,50,24,63,63,10,54,0,2,0,0,22,23,0,12,26,281,87,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644164984328081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725049606391573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05279125254276994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060272484926173486,0.049328575532042326,0.16069157248199284,0.11731855269340148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732308490981005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05121978578453415,0.07098246042587905,0.07046745595182953,0.041372437106719666,0.2645496893758012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564929983658943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656430423470097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474297619222558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17296580680357385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03243694689219465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033885399263554,0.09912664356958834,0.0,0.16758266323609566,0.0,0.07291759875086581,0.0,0.10261569609508632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3971029736459801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06434922666522543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3421250257238247,0.0,0.1336079170173497,0.07051201893966323,0.15687620540692288,0.14473146598641273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402360818993064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444884593364325,0.06987983530123923,0.0,0.0,0.0646496651718953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241029667826354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040375180104287,0.0,0.12311026838416506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694148947468543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123269495038982,0.06946986786168932,0.0612399052064414,0.044474601404852564,0.05601465154852717,0.06702470684931561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06416890176211078,0.0,0.08219424028615277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054785065875041006,0.0,0.10203176122108104,0.2569075372490166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053066818006148805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05435539288581352,0.049386990764275836,0.0,0.071812398482414,0.0,0.0,0.05123150386503947,0.10726712232598544,0.0,0.0,0.14687633366293965,0.0,0.0,0.12092413721717475,0.0,0.09646795081597748,0.05156257899542298,0.056071274815633856,0.059062120330149036,0.0,0.0,0.29833603514520163,0.04110571743155261,0.0,0.0,0.11222183912694206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871093712452923,0.069778455512126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059469121625305786,0.0578867880191692,0.0,0.07377110668539849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06537590135086846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imdefinetlyabot,2020/01/19,"I don't know what to do I am declining. Severely. I can't focus on anything well enough or long enough. I am developing a social anxiety. My cognitive capabilities are falling down, I tried to hang my coat to my towel hanger in my bathroom two days ago. I went from being a top tier med student, comfortable and adaptable around pretty much anyone or anything to this, whatever this is. No medical cause, no trauma to trigger anything but still... And this is particularly frustrating because I pulled myself from being an underachieving loser years ago and going back there terrifies me. Please tell me something.",5.3230275229357815,8.078955110091748,6.306871559633027,69.25957339449542,71.29357798165137,9.130642201834863,32.00091743119266,9.642632912329526,3.772067155963304,493,23,74,13,10,163,78,109,0.2,0.7140000000000001,0.086,-0.9244,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,5,5,1,0,3,0,10,1,0,2,0,10,13,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,5,4,3,1,1,1,0,14,2,11,10,3,17,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,2,7,58,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131411526218621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351203779158872,0.0,0.0,0.1235028078249808,0.0,0.4360508073083192,0.1572368809216881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13581647304598346,0.0,0.10767114110378104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181446203112182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391082001752655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650090715758471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003820906899273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707044665739356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631073242682886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19619453093315445,0.17793470901208347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984232720549088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19388513692895085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17969476188152714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19954001663205834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18005059084307856,0.0,0.13597730783045772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14105580971563986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543811614771794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991920954725145,0.0,0.17254045454771486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881030292069145,0.16373646040204748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374301256279755
mentalhealth,Invade_the_Yogurt,2020/01/19,"I don't know what it is, I live in the past. I pretty much a good memory and I guess, I have something like a diary but I like to archive stuff information, such as my thoughts, feelings, and of my depression.
I like to put down my good times and my bad times.

Whenever I'm sad, which is constant these days.
I like to look back on those good days and relive and see things I did when I was happy.
It's getting to the point where I do it too often and to my important friends, I think of them being their old selves. Which they've changed and became pretty decent and moved on, while I stayed behind, alone with my thoughts.
I can only remember those precious memories and stay afloat while driving myself to madness and ruin.
I seek to change, but I need to fix many things right now and I become too overwhelmed.
So I take a break and look back to give the happiness and motivation to try again, I honestly wanna stay isolated, but I can't. 
I'll probably decay from within and break from my loneliness.

It's hard to ask for help, but it's difficult to maintain a conversation, even online ones too.
All I can is just remember, it's all I have.
Ah, nostalgia. I love it too much that it'll eventually kill me inside.",3.743802367941715,4.981683553278688,4.833551912568307,84.55234061930784,72.07377049180329,8.373041894353369,26.260473588342442,8.841846274778883,1.8266528233151185,953,31,197,18,18,313,139,244,0.151,0.609,0.24100000000000002,0.975,0,1,1,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,2,1,15,22,2,1,7,1,14,1,0,1,2,35,30,23,1,2,5,0,2,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,18,15,0,0,9,0,0,3,2,9,1,1,4,5,34,13,26,24,4,31,0,4,3,1,9,8,0,2,19,138,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530275068912366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407711890336588,0.0,0.0,0.17120948862156754,0.09295464698944003,0.0,0.12295358119597947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23554158193464056,0.0,0.0,0.12030655791680675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435953445578073,0.0,0.09588707359277353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353142403593299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056291034455781104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860121226453088,0.0,0.05816454613787709,0.10679644119977247,0.0,0.28013119061294683,0.0,0.0,0.12264089361914066,0.0,0.0,0.2370225159843104,0.09972846851504803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462114659225484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231684901417376,0.0,0.061183231900200585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21755792598140955,0.0,0.0983051047984732,0.0,0.1869758017659545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047831746325284,0.0,0.0,0.11286962491726965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183245765394526,0.16367851368633196,0.08254867183106639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682053288341858,0.0,0.0754390725477635,0.08467034061649713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627564997105443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524141669349836,0.0,0.0,0.22652221486633906,0.12003095206836008,0.0,0.0,0.11191589125755932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522269757544103,0.09507393038819742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871440044892202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570611802703787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3559841036050087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274444969564758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370517671266221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14792341663944372,0.07133480730968311,0.0,0.17676478637082435,0.12983308681878253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558474344837472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,turtlesisbad,2020/01/19,"Talking by myself When I have embarassing memory surfaced in my mind, I tend to verbalize whatever I'm currently doing out loud.. (well not screaming but enough for the person next to me to hear).

for example, if I'm solving questions I'd suddenly say 'what the hell is this', or if I'm thinking about dinner I'd say 'honey chicken is damn good'. There are also cases where I'm tired, stressed, or having a bad day and >!spoiler kill my self,why am I still alive!< or anything along that line just slip out of my mouth and sometimes it puts me in awkward position at the office :/

its been happening the last 2 or 3 years, I feel like its a coping mechanism to distract my mind from my bad memories, but idk, I didn't major in psychology. Is it actually normal? is it just a normal young adult phases? it doesn't seems like a big deal which makes me uncomfortable going to a therapist, like I'm worried I'll waste their time (and my money, but mostly their time, I swear) when other people have more serious or distruptive behaviours",6.9483590909090935,6.649885445000002,7.489909090909091,73.74745454545454,64.55,10.872727272727275,34.18181818181819,10.436869588844218,3.5291999999999994,819,32,150,18,11,271,132,200,0.243,0.693,0.064,-0.9921,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,2,0,10,15,3,3,9,0,13,3,1,1,0,29,26,16,1,4,13,0,1,3,1,0,1,5,0,2,11,6,1,0,4,0,1,2,3,10,1,0,2,7,18,5,18,24,4,23,1,0,0,0,11,9,2,10,15,95,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.14708592860517908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053478618526688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403389222621936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516982798333308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720520271939836,0.15539093164124912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573929145400958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621112554043924,0.10767802205544776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566053227788263,0.1264210398807919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332856840142283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16987811130110486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16675496116867486,0.0,0.0,0.12286105126056784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209099713158316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061015642874564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.304378713083725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160297824758504,0.0,0.2953571385720768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449378735585696,0.13160731974734666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152032861112302,0.16884657648093745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397252549500294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372144453511429,0.1572391227463355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907095093357794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203692377602759,0.0,0.1726550615346335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211471040745389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17500342654235962,0.0,0.09657854057650864,0.0,0.0,0.1757780039843057,0.1732362985184039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13551994171369913,0.0,0.13600593432926547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15306862769922025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706200510522746
mentalhealth,x12x13x14,2020/01/19,"my bulimia gave me strep.  TW eating disorders and self harm. 

so basically i've gotten strep throat 3 times in the past two months . for those of you who don't know strep throat causes high fevers, and can be very serious if left untreated. this morning i noticed that my tonsils are inflamed and full of puss (the tell-tale sign for strep throat) and so i went online to figure out why the hell i get it so damn often. I've been suffering from bouts of bulimia and other eating disorders for the past two years or so, i've found that frequent vomiting can cause the tonsils to be more susceptible to tonsillitis and strep  throat. essentially i have to stop throwing up or else i can cause  very serious damage to myself. this news really sent me into a bad place. ive used eating disorders as a way to keep myself from other forms of self harm (in my case burning myself).  i dont know if i can function properly if i dont have the option to binge and purge. i have a lot of trauma i haven't been able to address properly and need some kind of coping mechanism and i need mental health help; unfortunately the counselling center at my university (the only feasible place where i can receive this help)  is open at hours that conflict with my classes and, even though ive called 13 times in the past week, i haven't been able to get a hold of anyone who could make me an appointment. what can i do?",5.600998930481284,6.0178558036363645,6.251914438502678,79.05151871657758,67.32727272727273,9.670588235294119,28.903743315508017,9.627879704456738,2.4481058823529414,1106,35,217,22,17,362,147,275,0.14800000000000002,0.8420000000000001,0.01,-0.988,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,0,8,11,2,0,14,0,25,12,4,5,0,41,39,21,0,6,5,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,2,13,14,3,4,4,0,0,4,5,10,0,2,8,0,28,1,31,28,5,32,1,2,0,0,11,16,2,9,11,139,41,1,0.2057705078073206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193976173074558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859048894896298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505734749663116,0.0,0.0,0.3170744904197696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214550339276791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35374624360192003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24116150265140426,0.0,0.0,0.3158319002257188,0.08594742768907969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795473986942828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280837045281293,0.0,0.0,0.10750659746481392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109362213768219,0.0,0.0,0.13792363392709892,0.10870391954163178,0.0,0.0,0.10132125043893277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914491409614384,0.0,0.10713915953123088,0.113086089727224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178512940451696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08746936365739512,0.0,0.0,0.06867670589778292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036841370649152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212202808332361,0.0,0.0,0.15257622423049108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713554348818868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824887178083527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946468496805489,0.0,0.0,0.21498638463857864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591092817817758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21466351652327129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601667916016867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899262467629308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108423958337992,0.0,0.11998643786503835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20100788650355647,0.0,0.0,0.08885982569771053,0.0,0.16978221897194645,0.0,0.08166552563434815,0.08252834473866905,0.0,0.0,0.09537566113194386,0.09283793887050808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625473028840531
mentalhealth,Rayarin,2020/01/19,"I’m somewhat numb but I can still feel happy? I don’t have much of an interest in a lot of things, I can’t really feel a connection with people, I rarely feel genuine concern for my friends, and I’ve stopped feeling sadness for a long time now.

Everything’s sort of a weird joke to me now, and I take almost everything pretty lightly.

I’m thinking that it might just be some coping mechanism but I don’t really know, I can’t piece it together.

I should see someone, but I don’t feel like I can right now, does anyone have any idea what this could be, or if anyone else feels similarly? Thanks.",2.8371900826446317,4.495869289256202,4.2447024793388435,86.18159917355374,75.11570247933885,7.815206611570248,26.149586776859504,8.548686976883017,1.7882026446280992,468,17,97,9,10,155,80,121,0.08199999999999999,0.6890000000000001,0.22899999999999998,0.9657,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,0,5,0,14,1,0,0,0,27,27,7,0,3,6,0,6,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,9,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,8,12,6,8,22,5,9,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,8,8,62,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682655879315953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11427146914216313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349918795904169,0.172174588228535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13416451332168902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14705101487350514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14037402329890197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020430866138948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.509789776756172,0.12004624092157735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12982559071676242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17887936725925388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896942273503587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234918263975006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820947832322525,0.0,0.0,0.14870816890733693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285973207250954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17826155550014647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352712079085465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649625552436152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095485758887854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21529864049465489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350336667438682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390437404805622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237788622568515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419520752596925,0.14048712857590107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634351622253634,0.0,0.0,0.15470663354929828,0.0,0.0,0.11163685045450374,0.10767183988513207,0.0,0.0,0.09798419497410503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,totoro_55,2020/01/19,"Hi everyone I’ve been ruminating a lot lately about the climate crises around the world. I have fears of a near-future economic/societal collapse. It is starting to make me depressed, daily. Can I get some advice on how to not let this affect my mental health?",4.688469387755101,6.743275346938777,5.5630102040816345,76.99716836734696,71.04081632653063,8.16530612244898,28.5765306122449,8.841846274778883,2.5346285714285712,208,8,35,4,4,68,44,49,0.193,0.807,0.0,-0.8519,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,4,0,5,1,0,3,0,7,8,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,6,6,2,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,2,2,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29364194346385336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675058139439491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588174079694791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871375193752669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381423835749751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699714782265564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31941399032373624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3389734194647336,0.0,0.0,0.3072782832044069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25547158853331225,0.0,0.0,0.2005839120959279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3028300435044962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21269314425752084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,escohidbo,2020/01/19,"I feel like an alien I know I sound crazy. But I feel like I'm not normal, like I'm not supposed to be here and that everything I'm doing is wrong. Every relationship I've had with anyone (friends, family, partners) is always ruined, like I'm not capable of having a stable relationship at all, like I'm not supposed to. I don't know what's wrong with me",2.49463963963964,3.9688547702702732,4.6875675675675685,83.42207207207208,75.62162162162161,7.636036036036036,23.144144144144143,8.344100000000001,1.3337549549549552,279,8,58,5,6,97,45,74,0.179,0.632,0.18899999999999997,-0.0475,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,1,9,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,0,1,14,16,2,0,1,5,0,2,5,2,0,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,3,6,6,6,14,1,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,31,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671665694810437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14047535931619726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926861153491515,0.0,0.18055777584746144,0.0,0.1893925388738912,0.0,0.20316418930550886,0.28704887772990195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552163975722205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22082098558447466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4907528801691531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19684131807550326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4313871548755068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4393096281238598,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vaetala,2020/01/19,"I'm only 26 but I feel like I'm running out of time Early January was my 26th birthday and I can't help but feel a constant impending sense of doom and dread that I'm wasting my life away. Even though I've worked a huge variety of jobs of my own volition to try and touch a lot of different career fields (all entry level) I have only managed to touch college here and there but I want to keep trying to complete my education. I live in rural WI and my transportation isn't as reliable as I'd like. I find myself really wanting to chase a biological career but fear that I'm getting too old to get the education and experience needed. I'm not committed to anyone and don't have children, but the idea of starting a family is something I've grown more open to with age. It's all adding a lot of pressure onto me all at once, but I'm trying to be grateful for the life I have right now. I enjoy my current job a lot. However, the constant dread follows me with each passing day. I don't think it helps that in rural WI it's pretty much expectation that you're married off/settled down in your early 20's even though I know that's not for everyone (especially not for me). People keep telling me I have time but I can't seem to convince myself that I have time no matter what I do. Does anyone have advice or perspective that can help me with this?",4.4036970423661055,4.893403478417267,6.011031175059951,79.4747162270184,69.97122302158273,8.911590727418066,29.47322142286171,8.998388855275968,2.320368665067945,1069,39,215,19,18,367,147,278,0.136,0.7759999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.9221,5,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,1,8,9,0,4,11,0,16,2,0,0,4,45,36,19,0,4,11,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,12,13,0,2,7,0,0,5,9,5,0,0,1,4,28,4,33,34,10,30,1,1,0,0,6,12,0,5,15,137,40,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815086526376435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16908475356850766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359797578543082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12677077517866556,0.2613193280482824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797629572416201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632415993832388,0.0,0.0,0.1058082715676084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971849458772505,0.0,0.0,0.11553372097898147,0.0,0.11827219241958603,0.11398223474596765,0.1360562279708961,0.12227043607464448,0.08637740631050456,0.0,0.0,0.1105086260197046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633991343592416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24312824117823445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649153213638054,0.0,0.0,0.2399670311783154,0.21493893073193354,0.0,0.0,0.06644841862668358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17080319007964745,0.11814004991389107,0.0,0.10676485294931816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083774975685804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888820193036181,0.08965248373696058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687364547677976,0.12876412785389146,0.0,0.18391346987769847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382306950913826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300790996325835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745739477279792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325561646079703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11007100308420416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308164725292804,0.0,0.0,0.08558000513571104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567978616721348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747359842807014,0.2375849367361901,0.0,0.21150901243500828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24626780173890825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142630509389424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802318442906981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sheriff_Lawless,2020/01/19,"Experience with EMDR? Like the title says, I’d like to hear experiences that people have had with EMDR.

I’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety for close to 10 years now. Been in and out of therapy and on various medications. I’ve never felt like anything has really helped me feel significantly better. I’m willing to bet part of that is because I haven’t taken the time to get into therapy on a consistent basis. 

I’m going to consistently go to therapy this year. I’ve found a therapist who does EMDR as well as CBT. I’m definitely going to ask about it. My brother had some significant improvement with it. 

That being said, I’d like to hear about people’s experiences.",3.732435897435898,6.1182070384615415,6.244230769230772,69.58993589743592,74.76923076923076,9.871794871794874,27.756410256410252,10.125756701596842,3.4711794871794868,545,22,93,18,12,194,82,130,0.04,0.792,0.168,0.9337,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,0,1,16,25,5,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,1,4,0,0,7,10,0,0,3,0,1,3,2,1,1,0,8,6,3,6,24,15,3,14,0,1,0,0,9,6,0,2,9,57,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612750310654978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416235932484525,0.0,0.12969312971305758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456806840112999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269475551372035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14302377403021424,0.11948730714595995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140290907652206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4071115048908402,0.0,0.0,0.07014568149349215,0.0,0.13320184390418768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15210947149813067,0.0,0.0,0.07248031177693233,0.0,0.2365291040297918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31271591394409504,0.0,0.09298729774900992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27110443305611365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975513297630146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699655661602746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502302679909016,0.0,0.19235480053429466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887351542169047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196329360447048,0.11032307461951996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4759469927347044,0.16107536178554852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089414631793035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473426419114622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17867418823563416
mentalhealth,Brandon4795,2020/01/19,"Question about my partner. Hi all, 

I’ll keep this short and sweet. So my girlfriend went to doctors because she was feeling sad every now and then but not all the time and not everyday just certain times. They gave her medication not sure what though. I can tell when she is down and today she said sometimes she just feels sad for no reason. Now I’m starting to panic as she 21 and her dad had schizophrenia and I’m worried that she’s worried about that but she assures me she isn’t. She says there is times she get a knot in her stomach when she feels sad and anxious. My question is.... can anxiety do all of this?

Thanks",1.0148100000000009,3.5551176960000035,1.8056750000000008,96.0317125,88.03999999999998,4.085,23.0125,5.602791699666715,0.1987700000000001,492,19,102,3,16,152,79,125,0.222,0.705,0.07400000000000001,-0.9668,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,11,9,0,1,2,0,9,3,1,1,6,27,21,15,0,0,7,1,3,0,2,0,2,2,0,1,5,7,0,1,6,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,5,6,20,5,9,16,3,15,0,3,0,0,25,3,0,2,11,71,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685198945852864,0.20209718677432967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090509817586136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18310367490577314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507243347024355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713597074267616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934637541909289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15900754434329314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18021500011779415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20989136956755425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4008002529723864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18393090362228454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701673810900876,0.14226220162463454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769288903875338,0.0,0.12662077005014247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860371500203353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563596062188503,0.16469983797653134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757606090005806,0.0,0.3129403180637399,0.0,0.16956882150828964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16583479633891066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633472823827721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GlitterAddiction,2020/01/19,"I won a giveaway (video call) session with an amazing therapist. How do I prepare? I have been following her for years and I love her work. I won a 25minute free coaching session via call.

I really want to use all of my time in the best way possible but I don’t know how to prepare in advance. 25 minutes is not a long time in this case.

If anyone has any tips please let me know. I know that she can help me but I need to be specific. I need to do this right because I really feel like her words will give me a huge boost.
Thanks for reading.",-0.047255639097741664,2.1767016929824585,1.8699248120300784,96.15947368421057,89.08771929824562,5.3624060150375925,22.177944862155385,6.868970318607317,0.5715734335839597,419,16,96,6,14,138,77,114,0.0,0.701,0.299,0.9864,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,5,2,8,0,0,6,0,11,1,0,3,1,18,25,6,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,3,1,2,2,0,0,0,3,1,19,9,11,19,2,12,0,0,0,1,9,5,0,1,5,59,22,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715532415608174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074334673247542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139835246042522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19622785132644496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3818625160854797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454457413489496,0.13358118866146668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17937179783552318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12533122892890358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30828404523698943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912034960869438,0.0,0.09135078818697624,0.0,0.0,0.1654746855362942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16876008455336527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772920803152106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20525194633387064,0.0,0.2107960206527925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18703429487263307,0.0,0.2395730852852088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596830533811522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17214946377895846,0.0,0.21710248099951365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21806339180963455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16149387657504394,0.0,0.0,0.11028782755492793,0.14841895326348034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612635650965016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041136871129643
mentalhealth,yougotmail47,2020/01/19,"What do you guys think this is? Gonna be a bit of a long post here, I’m not looking for a diagnosis or anything, just what you think it could be.
I’m currently diagnosed with MDD with psychotic features, and GAD. When I was at the hospital they said something about OCD and PTSD, but my therapist doesn’t really agree with it, so it hasn’t been changed to include OCD and Ptsd. I am a male and i’m 15 years old.
1. I’m pretty sure I have some form of disassociation or depersonalization, It feels like nothing is real around me sometimes, like i’m in a dream. I space out and just stare at one thing for a while, when i’m not even thinking about anything. Sometimes it feels like my body doesn’t belong to myself, like it’s not me if that makes sense.
2. I have hallucinations, mostly visual but sometimes auditory too. I can see shadow people, sometimes even actual people, that aren’t there. I hear voices mostly just calling my name, or whispering, but i also hear screaming and sometimes they insult me or tell me to do things.
3. I have intrusive thoughts, and sometimes i am compelled to do certain actions, like I have to check to make sure my door is fully shut constantly, have to make sure things are plugged in etc.
4. I’m not interested in things that i used to be.
5. I feel like ordinary stuff has meanings for me. I feel like some things are a sign just for me, proving i need to do things.
6. When i watch movies i take on the personality of the people in the movie, My whole personality changes including the way i walk, talk, etc.
7. I’m always tired but I have insomnia, these are side effects from my meds but i have had them before i took them,
8. I have delusions, I think that there are cameras in my house and there are cameras in the bathrooms things like that
9. I have very frequent mood swings, This could be from my age but the main one is i go from being depressed for a week, and then the next week I Have a lot more energy then usual.
10. I have cognitive problems, like I can’t focus things like that.
11. My appetite changes often, i could go from starving one day, to not being hungry at all the next.
12. I have flashbacks from trauma, and I avoid situations due to anxiety that it will happen again.
13. I go from hating someone one day, to loving them the next, it feels out of my control, and my relationships are often messed up because of it
14. My way of talking is kind of messed up, i stop mid sentence and sometimes switch topics completely
15. I am paranoid, i think someone is out to get me, and i can’t trust my friends because i think they will use information i give them against me in the future 
17. I have really bad social anxiety, sometimes to the point where it’s like a paralyzing fear.
18. I either don’t react to criticism at all, or I over react to it.
19. I am very impulsive, and i can’t help it
20. I get angry very easily, i think the word is like highly irritable.
21. My friends say I unusual beliefs, and i believe in lots of conspiracy theories 
22. I have meltdowns, where I just completely break down and start crying or screaming, or when someone is talking to me, i get overwhelmed very easily and say something like “stop yelling at me”
23.I have a lack of close friends, and i find people intimidating when they aren’t trying to be
24. I have frequent panic attacks
25. I do repetitive behaviors, or i say the same thing over and over again
If you read this all I want to thank you for listening to my problems, and once again, i’m not looking for a diagnosis, just what you think it could be",2.9707203389830497,4.787654800847458,4.27866666666667,85.40376271186442,75.14406779661016,7.262372881355933,26.34802259887006,8.07648339933343,1.5867029378531081,2781,103,569,45,60,916,297,708,0.14400000000000002,0.716,0.14,-0.8296,3,1,2,0,1,0,96.0,0,5,8,2,30,42,3,4,26,0,67,5,1,10,8,118,120,46,0,11,29,0,5,13,3,3,3,12,1,4,37,28,0,4,20,2,1,6,15,16,0,4,6,22,94,25,72,99,19,76,1,2,5,1,40,33,0,18,46,390,131,1,0.0,0.0,0.04935720226902728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04044751172744536,0.042085263404813264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738464359369385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324339336711611,0.04502548089927395,0.0,0.05754020829192943,0.0,0.0,0.04223083413317928,0.06166422125335653,0.0,0.04303847559012605,0.05698451346428768,0.0,0.0,0.05521849061219102,0.056181177426639584,0.0,0.0,0.051646180362499496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051565683335586,0.0,0.1060609370001076,0.054657259825811294,0.05672795325660403,0.16153088138179955,0.0,0.05555797478593304,0.06523774092764179,0.0,0.043563084058319296,0.05133599041778965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281652562888027,0.06681308514658185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05691473844407782,0.1278697416578448,0.1445328173787626,0.0,0.0,0.04622772246097627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723019136276287,0.0,0.07927534706229551,0.04851939026602713,0.08623457576545744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050080547520957086,0.04472629385992999,0.0,0.0,0.04993567837676447,0.0,0.0,0.11401101900204105,0.0,0.03390162156092282,0.05343883477486213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05836065903678935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05266959892751903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32123053766693593,0.0,0.0,0.04476027415438853,0.08494620040021518,0.0,0.0,0.08599985892062899,0.04564896211432671,0.0,0.10128438297796258,0.0,0.0,0.05509468271942923,0.056181177426639584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03750322744389579,0.0,0.0,0.16137204085228826,0.0,0.0,0.048531319134413234,0.0,0.053073500974187116,0.05386432335425094,0.13709287542288884,0.0,0.0,0.05934283049754099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402587194380511,0.08832617997457592,0.0,0.0,0.04781291690375453,0.0,0.04844010630347823,0.051456395098716884,0.0,0.09679335664030646,0.11824683776325128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0505920666211848,0.05756926876613783,0.06480360994568354,0.0,0.0,0.05430225103843929,0.0,0.0,0.04811162113547212,0.12066587208342353,0.0,0.0,0.040304419971693116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0568522175892182,0.0,0.05155828830607274,0.128564690180976,0.07787541498618578,0.4001864840471639,0.0,0.03579963726014615,0.0,0.0,0.08457157984560343,0.0,0.0,0.05790014363420501,0.0,0.0,0.14300857202326905,0.0,0.03802864674686441,0.12195895644439035,0.04420773292215368,0.046565776325872464,0.0,0.058725396804000976,0.3024182505851952,0.25926866599878673,0.0,0.040153583578565966,0.0,0.05813240673254572,0.0,0.0,0.056194440526006716,0.034339399556106584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873669608898395,0.0557049392422241,0.16692983998385666,0.029832438606857213,0.08029352666542659,0.08114185021715907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056468954334683415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03257081805204977
mentalhealth,TiredDevil,2020/01/19,"The ""therapist friend"" I've been that ""therapist friend"" since I was in elementary school. I am an adult now.

I got too into my friends's problems I developed clinical depression

I talked a friend out of suicide, she then turned manipulative, and threatened with killing herself several times, saying that if she actually died by her hand, it would be my fault. It's been years since that happened, and now I'm waiting for all contact with her to disappear.

There's  another friend telling me all about her suicidal thoughts, and being emotionally manipulative without realizing it, demanding hours of my time at 4 am. Mentioning how alone and sad she is. 

I know firsthand that depression is very difficult to deal with, but I'm always careful not to pester someone else with my problems. Why can't they do the same? 

Those are the most toxic issues I've had with being there for my friends. The other have problems, too. But there are problems that I can give advice with, and they talk about other things other than their problems.

I'm happy to listen and be there for them, but I'm not equipped to deal with their troubles. This ""therapist friend"" thing is harming my progress with depression a lot. They are not there for me when I need someone, yet I am always there for *them*.

How do you stop being the ""therapist friend"" without damning your friends to fend for themselves?",5.779793233082707,7.657758027777781,5.503266499582292,79.23003759398499,67.92857142857143,8.797326649958226,33.501253132832076,9.276330184999452,3.139385714285714,1101,51,194,22,19,340,135,252,0.2,0.659,0.142,-0.9345,0,1,0,0,0,1,37.0,0,2,7,1,16,26,2,0,8,0,24,2,1,4,2,46,38,14,4,8,9,0,1,0,9,1,1,2,0,1,15,16,0,2,3,0,0,1,6,15,0,0,6,3,33,11,32,26,5,15,0,4,0,0,36,4,1,3,10,145,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.07929772566849984,0.0,0.0,0.07940601866984696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416052167109173,0.0,0.0,0.13522912639866722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852078594682274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284965926479543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755032361710914,0.20996652951081954,0.0,0.08433471841904801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788203548715149,0.09140620255965004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.565029243599385,0.0,0.0,0.07795168935927871,0.0,0.0,0.06499078917648254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185766651322263,0.08650244020117685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002441612074086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481399381935345,0.0,0.0,0.08990179611341363,0.0,0.04465819491269068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908407392143831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060253022959439566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3887726962095676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646209589289334,0.0,0.0822391342395298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180030856443236,0.0,0.13443769374652345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377021260518815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793673090904366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177769801517904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062690517762718,0.07102454184051421,0.0,0.0,0.3773950055074094,0.10797064109347533,0.0,0.0,0.0645111089940847,0.09476634556878437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838719735520655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670477460653855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332422191574854,0.0,0.0,0.15666286320357975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057724545100146026,0.0,0.0,0.05232856961000852
mentalhealth,BMiller2930,2020/01/19,"I'm currently in an extreme state if mania. Please help. This is going to sound so dumb but I am really struggling here. Im at my girlfriends and everything that comes out of my mouth is mostly through singing. Why am I finding it so difficult to speak normally. I just feel the need to sing everything I say and it is annoying to me so i can only imagine what im putting her through.

Please help, I don't want to feel like this. Too many thoughts in my head going by too quickly.",1.6371428571428552,3.859511081632654,3.0422040816326543,90.7063673469388,81.04081632653063,6.777142857142858,27.1469387755102,7.908726449838941,1.7262130612244901,378,17,80,7,10,123,67,98,0.149,0.727,0.124,-0.5796,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,2,1,2,0,7,2,2,0,0,16,16,7,0,4,3,0,2,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,6,4,0,0,5,2,0,4,1,4,0,0,1,5,11,1,13,15,1,11,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,2,3,52,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16202958322192962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.338100314325991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902157798011651,0.1343770925011194,0.0,0.0,0.17191796437415754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138006075868068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19304258976279448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521559556673784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40635576295967263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918950747276326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19070162706255367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394721214106606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18429588867414515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14305683864318475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129497581944708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890902231013516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050025518089892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14958290533367366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966406413582132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14932862757800844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094494482044637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16972899083021584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DropTomato,2020/01/19,This is a question I need answered by everyone. Why does my mind wander to crime? I find myself slowly thinking about crimes I could commit but I know inside I would never do such a thing.,2.1622972972972967,4.678890027027029,3.32560810810811,87.69489864864866,81.16216216216216,4.781081081081081,20.06081081081081,5.985473137389443,0.21051891891891872,149,4,27,1,4,48,32,37,0.071,0.879,0.05,-0.1655,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,2,12,7,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,21,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265496938792154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29099791985667833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177452195379946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039250128701493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18274896009217306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357589786690444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465656596683965,0.2564664689168689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3725080081760523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209171510278698,0.21307082756733864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000552380334313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23621869646700955,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CKmega,2020/01/19,"I have an Issue Through my life I have had to endure watching people get angry and upset and at a very early age I was exposed to a lot of it. I. hated. It. Somehow over the years I developed this mindset of doing anything I could to make people happy, even as I developed severe anxiety and panic attacks, I continued to smile and help. This took a toll on my mental health, leading to episodes of screaming randomly when away from people (Home alone, etc). It makes me really angry and upset because I try so hard and yet I always seem to do something wrong, but of course.. i cant take out that anger on other people, and end up hitting myself in some crazy 'venting' method. I'm scaring myself and am losing the will to keep going, but I'm worried if I let myself go people will be angry. If they expect me to try really hard and suddenly I stop trying completely, they might think they deserve something. I feel like I'm in an unwinnable situation and my anxiety is making me exaggerate things in my head. I don't know what to do, and I'm wondering what I CAN do.",7.787830188679244,6.0456221226415074,8.596867924528302,71.18681132075474,63.62264150943397,10.932830188679247,35.350943396226405,9.642632912329526,3.331621132075472,838,30,153,13,10,286,130,212,0.253,0.706,0.040999999999999995,-0.9907,0,1,3,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,3,2,5,12,3,4,7,0,19,3,1,4,0,34,39,18,0,4,4,0,3,1,0,3,2,1,1,0,10,12,0,2,5,0,0,4,2,10,0,0,3,5,29,2,26,29,3,23,0,1,1,0,4,10,0,9,10,114,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497050316486268,0.0,0.0,0.10040130237447847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18461376672061205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099295387885984,0.0,0.0,0.13727160968054572,0.1133668833628796,0.0,0.0,0.07355505969147517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651288532330346,0.0,0.0,0.09633960650567797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687162489308168,0.0,0.13457116798285096,0.07969678958462381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06101085063075745,0.08620168870691196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630414500414172,0.0,0.13715115483982532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284480331428688,0.21618073837265966,0.11912975560482852,0.123835074268852,0.12825915242912295,0.0,0.0,0.08087788175597033,0.0,0.1210348516870292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12594084818591242,0.0,0.10725084017542096,0.0,0.0,0.06631324257333432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338611757026885,0.08522786252961799,0.05894985877376242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499105984395174,0.0,0.10258338835376092,0.0,0.0,0.24163051715674594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215999483009332,0.1280044006181916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415720607764953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182627409712952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545996463068402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080473721146673,0.0,0.0,0.10984708558409466,0.0,0.13631487215373805,0.0,0.0,0.13563029495454973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18578458241684195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087969129111664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072357761428397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016315177570467,0.07731599384558778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13406105982387595,0.2457668190188666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955963194485837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308539027700832,0.0,0.1225391583523689,0.0,0.0,0.13192607513036572,0.0,0.07770303159024462
mentalhealth,AccomplishedPace1,2020/01/19,"Complicated contradictory mood and mind. I have constant conflicts in my mind about whether I like/hate things and often have these two contradictory thoughts at the same time. I find my mood often changes quickly and that a period of feeling upset and anxious about something is often (suddenly) followed by having the opposite opinion (happy and positive) about that subject matter. I understand this is quite a vague description and I'm not sure how to describe it.

I'm just interested in what mental illnesses, if any, that this could relate to, maybe BD or BPD?",7.43112554112554,9.308901030303028,7.327734487734487,67.71636363636367,63.94949494949496,10.1015873015873,37.37518037518039,10.290406445055957,4.373827128427127,458,23,69,11,7,146,71,99,0.183,0.7659999999999999,0.051,-0.9109999999999999,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,1,4,0,6,1,0,1,1,27,12,10,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,1,6,3,10,10,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,6,5,53,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488318928297406,0.0,0.0,0.2472488192063277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756457450239668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23152421897848385,0.0,0.0,0.2365092535330553,0.0,0.17474141724218265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066188552203954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20003352101115807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23297989443244085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692364482251288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21987367782917272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205587927269444,0.0,0.4419711959869155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327839052999811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684886538920662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20627238861371447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454004563643432,0.0,0.0,0.17374991188927247,0.12761867257741946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21379382628252055,0.2278403474940364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,potatobug25,2020/01/19,"Can't sleep I haven't been able to sleep recently. After a long time of doing the whole ""I can't use mental health resources because other people need them more so if I use the resource and someone kills themselves it's my fault for barring them from getting help"" thing, I got over it and have talked to a psychiatrist. I start therapy on Tuesday. We're currently working with the idea it's likely OCD + depression or anxiety + depression. Either way, not a fun combination. These past few nights I haven't been able to sleep. I'll get really anxious in bed and my hands will feel weird (I'm not sure how to explain how my hands feel). I'll toss and turn and sleep for a couple hours at a time. I went to bed at 1:30 AM and woke up at 6 AM today, and then slept a couple hours at a time until 10 AM. Even now tryin to do homework, I can't really focus and there's a part of my brain that's convinced that if I scratch my arms a lot and/or make myself throw up I'll feel a bit better, which I know isn't really true. I don't think I'll do anything to myself so it would be a waste of resources if I were to call a hotline, but my friends are busy and I just need to hear a voice. I feel crazy when I tell people about it but I don't feel real sometimes and another person being present makes me feel real. Is there a resource that's a bit more I'm Not a Suicide Risk but Hearing Another Voice Would Help?",2.7918547895057984,3.7979723221476505,4.185344722391702,89.18166564978647,74.1006711409396,7.1631482611348405,24.61928004881025,7.520522993642371,0.9817798657718121,1104,33,245,13,22,366,157,298,0.086,0.836,0.077,0.5572,1,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,2,2,11,13,1,1,19,0,25,11,9,6,2,48,52,24,2,7,12,0,9,1,1,3,1,4,3,1,12,11,1,0,10,1,0,2,11,6,0,0,7,13,27,7,28,40,9,31,0,2,0,0,12,9,0,5,20,149,39,2,0.1879824832100241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197116024140362,0.07190304256249272,0.10618334947040167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734678326811903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0572961884872515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312761508240184,0.2052281846290509,0.0,0.0,0.10492531040110263,0.09597556652952254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20799904218791734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619090373353628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06208032862759884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851487752578821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261740010867661,0.0,0.09821308878636703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517338217485453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09990829459752107,0.21186992072843155,0.0,0.1260006959949971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18512487977422112,0.0,0.0,0.10610467111880964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398738287494147,0.0,0.051655128302790905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04591937296721143,0.0,0.0,0.08317929108855164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990799245397401,0.0,0.0,0.12547976725059576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472106456189562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139386629382837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820441310498045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178335527859816,0.08972527544265466,0.13032338465582535,0.08206952675830205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139652204960476,0.18063958846638825,0.0,0.09280501189707337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3762364838224733,0.0,0.07963847399881911,0.0,0.09295974129718164,0.0,0.06652748457829312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281116292006147,0.0,0.08858563287207,0.0,0.0,0.07554659967715531,0.08215248799445164,0.0,0.10748717619326148,0.0,0.0624436044663457,0.060225792420495965,0.0,0.0,0.16442114651227538,0.0,0.08909270693413689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223548060178887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235650939741975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746058726538774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713082262580069,0.0,0.10493786463124774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842674331873351,0.0,0.0,0.13353736259147111,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Elver86,2020/01/19,"Why is our generation so depressed? (F23) I've noticed that a HUGE portion of people around my age have mental health issues like anxiety and depression. Some of them are working through it with therapy, and even a lot of those who do not go to therapy seem to be suffering. It's brought up so casually, it seems almost as though it's a given. It's frightening, because if it's so common, logically the root of at least some of it must be our society and culture. 

What do you guys think that might be? I've got my own ideas about it, but I'd like to hear other opinions too.",4.172758620689656,5.069837482758626,5.628793103448277,80.53301724137933,70.72413793103449,9.248275862068963,30.87931034482759,9.516144504307137,2.748451724137932,452,19,92,10,8,153,82,116,0.09300000000000001,0.833,0.07400000000000001,-0.2945,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,2,1,1,1,8,6,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,1,1,21,18,10,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,2,1,1,0,1,14,5,0,0,5,1,0,2,1,3,0,0,3,1,6,3,15,10,6,8,0,3,0,0,8,4,0,9,4,66,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836678954729936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14031523295967122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16328202982168136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181067933672724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31595748221978914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114669231171532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042413931739003,0.0,0.14669713904058515,0.0,0.0,0.18161390595907892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19496609783752428,0.206726838146794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20705802029455786,0.0,0.19144205512136253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17921877254794513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559364969399468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18484347485906552,0.19457885088045604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20882404484213551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715982124248668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339560137354005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41951182120357394,0.0,0.0,0.11752765658446328,0.1802084930926316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655073544069164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335314068399119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mangobearmango,2020/01/19,"Had an experience after getting drunk for the first time. Should I get help? I'm usually very controlled with my alcohol. I don't drink often and when I do it's usually a glass of beer or a mild cocktail after a reasonably heavy meal. Before yesterday, I have never been drunk or high in my entire life.

Also, I know I get sad (depressed?) sometimes with occassional suicidal ideation. This started after I broke up with my ex last year and flares up on significant dates like on birthdays and holidays. I haven't sought help but it's infrequent enough that it doesn't affect my work and social life.

Yesterday I decided to throw caution to the wind and drank several shots of gin (can't remember how many) on an empty stomach at a party consisting mostly of work colleagues. I don't remember much about what happened when I was drunk but I recall screaming for my colleagues to kill me or let me die. I remember crying and begging them to let me jump out the window. I woke up with scratches and bruises on my body and a bloody toe.

None of my colleagues seem to acknowledge what happened. I don't know if they are pretending nothing happened or if I just imagined the whole thing. A few that I asked said I mumbled a bit and went to sleep, which contradicts my injuries. I don't know what the alcohol did to me. I don't know if this is normal when people get drunk. 

I hope someone can advise me what to do. Should I seek help from a mental health professional? Or would it be enough just to abstain from alcohol from now on?

Note: sorry if I am posting this in the wrong subreddit. I was considering posting it in the subreddit for alcoholics but since I'm not a habitual drinker I thought here would be more suitable.",4.100000000000001,5.972948129129133,5.024204204204207,81.00855855855856,72.21321321321321,8.416816816816818,30.35135135135136,9.049649993220411,2.7051513513513523,1369,60,255,29,27,446,177,333,0.154,0.7829999999999999,0.063,-0.9864,0,0,7,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,2,4,11,8,1,0,18,0,28,19,4,4,1,55,50,26,3,10,15,1,1,1,0,4,7,2,1,0,16,14,13,2,13,9,0,3,11,6,0,1,10,3,40,2,40,32,9,37,0,3,0,0,10,14,0,13,19,184,56,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4022341704791628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524744098253493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796577646862525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006759905946935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027269648003124,0.10451792093484584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553512768598472,0.0,0.0,0.10335853184206996,0.0,0.0,0.0810435662590171,0.0,0.09765536949227144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217691442480028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19444981010436005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204260270960654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003684353643402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19664224059523105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496227095702108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001819078534087,0.0,0.0,0.18920893958627408,0.0994161419123432,0.0,0.09345719797652684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410176593998477,0.0,0.20684778970325826,0.07669968144774295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19243626694360555,0.1329236386374026,0.04596988292793593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953971852813176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482525494912544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06917037913500053,0.0,0.07257157879543766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219275844282916,0.09028633447167993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523336827441514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18023328924757626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674495026463924,0.0,0.0,0.3197726167242933,0.0,0.08950553983050104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566021648423874,0.0,0.10630014803416203,0.0,0.07783604962828887,0.0,0.09416258322433532,0.09591762486193273,0.07972607397969672,0.0,0.09306199428058437,0.10533123375808913,0.06660066285613131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292425217772276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251229059608322,0.0,0.0,0.0747006251194246,0.05486733498040405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20726388096802187,0.07763792348372105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872266639699729,0.0,0.105053293198289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700402145073648,0.0,0.0,0.13368424976574864,0.10287770581707066,0.0,0.06059385619663416
mentalhealth,elusivem,2020/01/19,"Need to vent over severe guilt of my dads medical state. The end of August my dad was in a car accident. He is 69, and was pretty banged up but he was expected to make a pretty decent recovery. He spent a week in the icu while he was recovering from the accident and getting surgeries to fix his wrist, hip and pelvis. After that they transferred him upstairs for 1 night of observation and then he was supposed to be discharged to a temporary rehabilitation facility. I was there when they moved him from the icu and stayed to make sure he was comfortable and had everything he needed. He started acting odd but I had someplace I had to be, so I went and talked to his nurse and told her I was concerned about his behavior and breathing. She sent respiratory in and I said my goodbye and left. I wasnt even 30 minutes down the road when I got a call that they couldn't find his heartbeat. He had stopped breathing shortly after I left, and wasnt being monitored. Their best guess is he was without oxygen for 27 minutes. He was in a medically induced coma for a few days while his body recovered. It took a few days after they stopped the meds for him to wake up. I was asked to ok a tracheotomy and having a feeding tube placed while he was under. Even after he woke up he was more or less a vegetable. On full vent and he would only occasionally follow movements. He has slowly gotten better, but he will never be the man I said goodbye to in August. And it's my fault. I knew something was wrong. He knew it too. I know I let his nurse know but I should have stayed until I knew he was ok for sure. The guilt is going to kill me. I already suffer from ptsd and anxiety. I am constantly either in the verge of crying, hopelessly depressed, having panic attacks or just a blank emotionless husk pretending I'm ok. I'm realizing more and more everyday how much I miss and neglected the relationship I had with my dad, and how he will never be the same man again, even if he recovers he will never be the same. I'm compensating for my guilt by taking on so much responsibility for him and his affairs that the stress is overwhelming. I'm taking custody of his estate and him, and have full medical power of attorney.",4.1416677115987435,5.649767409195405,5.392748171368861,79.87752351097181,71.45977011494253,8.399164054336469,27.894461859979106,8.927757054556999,2.216333333333333,1753,64,337,34,33,584,208,435,0.159,0.764,0.077,-0.9903,1,0,1,0,0,2,37.0,0,0,5,3,14,23,2,6,25,3,45,13,7,5,5,62,77,40,1,7,10,3,0,0,0,5,4,2,0,2,6,23,2,3,8,1,1,9,7,15,0,0,35,2,47,8,51,29,14,61,0,6,0,0,56,22,0,4,27,237,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11576006240525095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024842354991328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806759699489216,0.11933920715342727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008636719082426,0.0927757689534338,0.0,0.11652055788580765,0.0,0.0,0.1071149097287518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335993119277728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152280267802456,0.13530399888867706,0.0,0.09035045348292756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291050794566703,0.0,0.0,0.20785692767432656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09427760351318858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587695127922176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05480606429292376,0.0,0.059617243932855675,0.0,0.0838983330532111,0.0,0.11555947990549505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605661245200588,0.0,0.11530089595206612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279489122941284,0.107267638799039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14004349677579564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652055788580765,0.31702797416510226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149239149708093,0.15422754478645578,0.15556445003265398,0.24271667783660505,0.0,0.0,0.0984418023155014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978138642277842,0.0,0.12307787114510806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959846089875104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21344258480606426,0.0,0.0,0.12262280834535688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112623637938458,0.0,0.0,0.19956836763757888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850745251626035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075735696023763,0.0,0.0,0.07424895484094671,0.22361947228341855,0.0,0.17540265470159386,0.12016291104007233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19773453622568224,0.0,0.15774390418830314,0.08431486780797955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023670853924004,0.1165480657417897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414467343209206,0.0,0.0,0.0972436062389238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112012210246986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451814590227553,0.11469198361962953,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hypotheticalflowers,2020/01/19,"My thinking voice is too loud I was wondering if somebody on this subreddit may have an explanation or has maybe had a similar experience to me. Very seldom, and without any triggering or prompts that I have seen, my thinking voice suddenly begins to scream or yell. It's not yelling anything particular, it is only what I am thinking in that moment. (For example, this text post.) It doesn't say anything, it is simply my thoughts but at a very loud volume. I'd really like to know why this happens, and if there is any way to prevent it or lessen the effects as it always sends me into a panic attack. Thanks in advance! :)",5.4807773109243705,6.52010736134454,6.374275210084032,75.85620273109244,67.82352941176471,9.311344537815128,34.202731092436984,9.516144504307137,3.3268058823529416,492,23,88,10,8,163,83,119,0.08199999999999999,0.816,0.102,0.3677,0,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,2,5,1,1,5,0,12,0,0,2,0,22,22,10,0,2,9,0,0,1,0,1,0,8,0,0,12,3,0,1,7,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,4,9,8,2,12,17,0,12,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,8,4,61,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16577136376179688,0.0,0.0,0.2709599971728364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32789080372129337,0.0,0.0,0.2266474777154437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194880518313698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617422654228895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948898467319887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733139163915837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20014853668201385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15151977654851193,0.0,0.23374789998195505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19080271413426908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762879364745625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15843191144581606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341983919444416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3829664786392175,0.0,0.1581625911596622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3287633839960426,0.0,0.15813572661457634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976979645512325,0.0,0.0,0.19204602718147265,0.21605128023980916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Crazyncool,2020/01/19,"BPD struggles or spiritual awakening? To those with BDP (Borderline personality disorder) 
What are your thoughts on ""getting better""? Is it possible cause I feel like no matter how good I'm doing, my life continuously falls apart. Lost my mom (I'm an only child) in 2015 , lost my 3 children (due to mental health) in 2016 & lost my dad (step dad & amazing father since I was 9) in 2018. Not sure if the universe is showing me a greater calling (spiritually) or if I'm just really going crazy. Please enlighten me!",4.440312500000001,6.5392107395833365,5.9295833333333325,73.92375000000001,71.8125,8.966666666666667,30.75,9.516144504307137,3.1263999999999985,405,18,72,10,8,137,76,96,0.147,0.6779999999999999,0.175,0.6219,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,4,2,9,0,1,3,0,5,2,0,2,1,14,15,5,0,2,6,4,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,3,1,0,3,2,4,0,0,5,1,9,5,7,10,1,10,0,3,0,0,9,5,0,4,3,36,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3660622209202468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940120512756738,0.0,0.0,0.21275622077098816,0.0,0.17249220115479091,0.0,0.0,0.17353340210781398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19360368301414527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541399594255937,0.12068067586886118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825679534676271,0.0,0.09600446528687202,0.14168700581258814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17956030135489368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931733829372153,0.08252864770874416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5532076288880656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17023754600063332,0.0,0.0,0.19784393826294933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284757368520854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474995546279685,0.0,0.18542987867659216,0.0,0.19043853777432104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821823844328217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973722597648144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17659799792288128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921063409501476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341082722305024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LookIHaveABlanket,2020/01/19,"Feeling so dead inside and lonely I'm an 18 year old college dropout, struggling with bipolar disorder. Recently, I've realised that I don't feel like myself anymore- I can't remember the last time I genuinely felt happy. I feel dead inside. This past week has been pretty rough, I think I just realised how alone and lonely I was and had around five mental breakdowns (I think). I so badly want someone to talk to, but I'm so scared they'll judge me and then leave me. How can I make these feelings go away? I'm not sure. I've searched on google and I've tried a bunch of exercises,but I still feel as dead as ever. I know I'm very much alive but I can't stand this feeling of detachment and apathy and everything else. I really don't want to look back at my teenage years and not be able to recall a single moment I felt happy, or worse,felt anything at all.",3.0534415584415577,4.563268500000003,4.129902597402598,87.8443181818182,74.22727272727273,7.074025974025973,25.07142857142857,7.7094869923839395,1.2179655844155843,680,22,141,9,14,221,110,176,0.20199999999999999,0.6890000000000001,0.109,-0.9411,0,5,0,0,1,0,20.0,0,0,1,1,10,9,0,2,4,0,11,1,0,3,3,36,31,19,3,2,6,0,9,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,10,0,0,12,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,5,10,20,4,14,24,4,20,0,2,1,0,2,5,0,1,14,80,24,2,0.13392567987472684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387066144784452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328182875320311,0.0,0.0,0.1102094233294351,0.1192222489814963,0.0,0.0,0.12582758480610046,0.10298058108479984,0.11182234861601137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15349043191320544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187772056744094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114344483656335,0.0,0.0,0.1203637654937151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4063010865665715,0.095676532462121,0.3857689650927645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611305019131111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28513275312908964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360205120004094,0.10916730392028326,0.0,0.14180795764572446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542932233940196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246384105038892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939643126632768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349655856576461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845078439415124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14053247230428262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127847215446975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625056358361726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579621989077565,0.0,0.1322354519618867,0.0,0.151711688047054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408296907835535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347479395259805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069532209468101,0.0,0.0,0.14000819898767086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622336833661196,0.0,0.0,0.10764438846871582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17162833596357102,0.0,0.0,0.07809314093674137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092674552242797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050271172849158,0.1579856717696617,0.0,0.1074271021230271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17248749382686146
mentalhealth,grim1997ces,2020/01/19,I need answers Alright so I ve been dealing with mental health issues since I was 7 years old but recently probably over that last month or so I've been experiencing soemthing new and I was curious if anyone else had any insight as to what could be going on. It usually happens just after i have an episode my heart starts beating really hard and fast I can feel it and see it outside my chest I get dizzy and all of the sudden feel like my body weighs thousands of pounds I usually end up on the floor nearly throwing up and so freaking exhausted I've wound up just passing out a few times. Any idea what this could be? Just another symptom? Thanks in advance,4.236076923076927,5.849721992307693,4.910769230769233,83.0092307692308,71.38461538461539,7.969230769230768,30.69230769230769,8.548686976883017,2.392369230769231,529,23,101,9,10,170,95,130,0.126,0.79,0.084,-0.7777,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,6,5,0,0,4,1,11,8,3,0,1,22,20,12,0,4,6,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,7,7,1,0,5,0,0,4,0,2,0,1,5,5,11,3,15,11,2,28,0,0,1,0,1,10,0,2,15,65,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22521147174730455,0.17363379144424884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578320347265067,0.16966480217469834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18393129431879948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644175989708158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17071428697371285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832779354094907,0.0,0.1466621023134075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16745285994085074,0.1182963289027342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651306280043677,0.0,0.09410765824719199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464292045228494,0.0,0.14833460987010522,0.0,0.0,0.17601264091389954,0.0,0.19622295649098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186929057814043,0.0,0.17283118489644406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13497658158850342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089808896877873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16687407978365096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217101722891186,0.0,0.0,0.1227816411269662,0.0,0.15992623131379086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17375708689906322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17853221565024768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608011793099537,0.0,0.16349848928814614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13195245225755686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369763694564692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720426518294952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172109667127887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15245147757469732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655588102503376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647442807033107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663344906144603
mentalhealth,flowersofblood,2020/01/19,"I'm too old to have bipolar disorder I have reached that age where I'm the only one that can look out for myself and where no one will do anything to stop me from becoming homeless. When being a teenager they were like here take all this money, take this apartment, ur doctor wants to see you all the time but now it's daily worrying about where I'm supposed to live and if I'll actually get a job and that no one owes me anything.

Does anyone else feel like when you were a teenager it was okay to struggle ? but now as an adult there's all these responsibilities and there's no time for an inconvenience like mental illness. If I wasn't in a (somewhat) good place i don't know how I could do this. Whenenever I start to experience any symptoms I don't have time for that and something I too often think to myself is ""If you're still standing you can still do it"" which maybe sounds positive and great but when it's because I'm about to pass out or have a breakdown and I feel like I have no choice but to not feel like that then maybe it's not so great.

But then I think about how everyone else can do it and don't understand why it's so hard for me",3.964071576763484,4.53441315352697,4.728358402489628,87.99054590248964,70.99170124481326,7.850726141078838,26.68075726141079,7.865858978985527,1.2655661825726139,914,28,204,11,16,295,117,241,0.125,0.74,0.136,0.7777,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,3,1,0,23,10,0,1,9,1,23,4,0,2,3,38,42,27,0,5,11,0,4,5,0,1,4,1,0,1,17,10,0,1,7,0,2,1,10,1,0,3,4,7,19,9,21,35,4,26,0,0,2,0,6,8,0,6,21,141,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.118951488582784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289246786771251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523149730353274,0.12489536215391575,0.20061764242083846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430578085042522,0.1346229438411638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732287239319268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970170451095731,0.1247642278963822,0.10667073432084694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036544957917656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647545766564266,0.0,0.11923625089246802,0.0,0.0,0.18490062745442268,0.2612444534825684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06368486669603614,0.0,0.0,0.10223935779995608,0.0,0.2687783237045521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919356626845124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209615233730968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669900519529637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977575781720407,0.0,0.10763511297397924,0.0,0.10236071457192236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449189004840561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284102749384865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790781598131726,0.0,0.2477966870482453,0.09270629126010063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735385148480505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713416749123756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384037294210483,0.0,0.0,0.08627758355522383,0.0,0.19469027590795268,0.10190929440853984,0.0,0.1274306404658969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669510075515786,0.18329904983966253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15621020006021158,0.0,0.0,0.21323306143889828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268965160929801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189655850017683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999086383025247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378982335571355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExtremelyNormal,2020/01/19,"Feeling lost, empty and confused after a breakup Not sure where else to post this so gonna put it here because I do feel this has been really affecting me mentally. 

My girlfriend broke up with me yesterday, but it was my doing. We’d only been together for about two months or so, but the first month or so was just so incredible. She made me so happy and I was so sure I’d found my soulmate, life was looking very good for me - better than it ever has before. 

However, these intense feelings I had for her seemingly disappeared almost overnight, and I don’t know why. To go from feeling as amazing about her as I did to feeling nothing towards her has made me feel very empty. Life now seems boring and pointless and I have no motivation to do anything. The enjoyment has been sucked out of everything, not just the relationship I had with her. She tried to help me as best she can but nothing has worked, and she had to break up with me because she couldn’t handle how cold and distant I had become, and how I was unable to return her affection like I once could. I don’t blame her at all, she didn’t deserve this to happen to her and I feel so guilty that I’ve put her through this - I know that she’s heartbroken over it. 

The thing is, I feel even more empty and lonely without her, and I feel like I have nobody to turn to. All I’ve been able to do today is lay in bed feeling nothing. I can’t enjoy anything that I used to, and I’m barely able to even make myself eat at the moment. I just can’t see how I’m going to feel any better any time soon, or how this emptiness is going to go away, and it scares me because I think I’ve always been in a good place mentally until now.",5.6168238515363536,4.972274895953756,6.347365378764831,81.99004411317311,67.38150289017341,9.13392150897475,30.63827198052936,8.371475516178862,2.068036994219653,1318,43,276,16,19,435,164,346,0.141,0.6829999999999999,0.17600000000000002,0.9642,1,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,1,0,0,7,24,20,1,2,7,0,38,3,0,11,5,66,72,34,0,2,12,0,11,2,1,1,2,0,1,0,15,17,1,0,18,0,0,7,10,7,0,2,20,14,49,13,44,48,4,35,0,3,2,0,20,12,1,7,16,202,64,2,0.1800645206783272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901543035966111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749140529361851,0.0,0.0,0.12245004873677948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817775802678232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458827226942331,0.0,0.0,0.1646484907605776,0.09943355806915333,0.07661082235932175,0.0,0.09448330267689957,0.15925243575191786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718834338891223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212547890539843,0.07521040082605432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118930917679095,0.08143933392095333,0.0,0.0,0.08091519027918093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5007531759364576,0.0643190647755947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658139465149104,0.0,0.09871572642037416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466963338000152,0.15102957684166168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961523048181651,0.09584101527411802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060346726306743814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895875147077056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718489609562444,0.08797042939317176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756044234807106,0.0,0.09828084753593842,0.0,0.0,0.17038140324380166,0.06009723288835068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146268521650336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14372578248970733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591651459367496,0.0,0.0,0.09588141892609954,0.0,0.06847359099696365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940645496646214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622601818949703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18101457743604887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05767697138105118,0.0,0.0,0.09666095397141793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013799885430776,0.0,0.07174405497427233,0.16392397687511107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16970867976325318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059813433228761675,0.057689037081997414,0.0,0.0,0.052498535024024906,0.0,0.08534005560564155,0.0,0.0,0.061125994897510014,0.09792924583463468,0.08794843615227453,0.0,0.0,0.07775896600692894,0.0,0.14857208744176842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124011133381259,0.0,0.0,0.08678788615825124,0.0,0.06554455780595653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asianstyleicecream,2020/01/19,"How to know if Rhodiola is working? What should i be ‘looking’ for? Because i’m always anxious so i don’t know the feeling of NOT being anxious really... I’m trying adaptogens mainly for my daily anxiety i get now, and maybe it’ll ease my depression.
I’m trying Rhodiola this time - i recently have tried Ashwagandha, Holy Basil and now this one.  Ashwagandha (300,600, then 1200 mg) i tried for 5 months.
Holy Basil (450mg) tried for 2 months. (started to get impatient bc no effect)
So the previous adaptogens have no had much luck with me. 

I’m not sure if it’s because I don’t know how to identify the feeling of relief from anxiety/depression, because i’ve had generalized anxiety & low mood/depression most of my life so it’s like i REALLY don’t know or know how to know, the feeling of being ‘not depressed’ or ‘not anxious’ because i’ve always felt it. 

So i’m in day 5 & been taking 300mg (1 capsule) to start, and when i hit 1 week or maybe even like 10 days, i will double the dose to the “recommended dose” given which is 600mg. 

If you’ve tried this, or any adaptogen really, what did you notice? 

Did you feel yourself not get worried about something that once did? 
Did it make you sleepy ? (heard it can have that calming affect but i have yet to experience that)
Was your dose the recommended amount or was it more/less?
Did you add any other adaptogens or herbal remedies that helped increase the adaptogenic affect ?


I’m never trying antidepressants again because they made me crazy instead of sane, so please do not advise those.",3.7809395973154376,5.7494527718120825,5.056115436241615,80.0435825503356,73.29530201342283,8.392161073825504,28.02738255033557,9.065960079200117,2.4584602416107386,1218,48,228,27,25,404,149,298,0.067,0.835,0.099,0.8457,0,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,5,1,2,16,9,0,0,8,0,27,4,0,8,2,46,56,23,0,4,16,0,5,2,0,3,4,1,0,0,19,5,0,0,12,0,0,1,12,3,0,1,14,7,21,6,20,35,6,19,0,3,1,0,9,2,0,11,18,137,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497150136773966,0.2017973453572697,0.0,0.12665359269412632,0.0,0.1424775970292562,0.3156072664917859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838344165861929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011319211845554,0.0,0.320826626450658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06150682732208005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109210971381616,0.0,0.0,0.18834303735834385,0.0,0.0894126314282592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14595868674410495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624183475051777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070676132413898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577549046781889,0.09099033482167652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819982071206813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811518276926779,0.06216028931639776,0.0,0.1871090309104156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486596935067479,0.0,0.06845607989803294,0.0,0.07182215651371297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602109080910878,0.0,0.09917289788675744,0.06310251799646498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022210300008242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17897083055057084,0.0,0.09194767436909518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169059311783182,0.0,0.0,0.1318258004294874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877672741870331,0.0,0.07001686581663366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054300738468991895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4425705713021068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469760989110999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779461350413317,0.0945708715778222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AGayChinchilla,2020/01/19,"Would I be in the wrong for getting my hair cut against my parent's explicit wishes? (Originally posted to r/AmITheAsshole but got taken down for mentions of self harm and suicide so i thought this sub might be a better place for it)


This might be a bit of a validation post, if I'm being honest. I'm angry and sad and very lost on what to do and feel seriously guilty and keep doubting myself on whether I actually want to do this.


I am a 16-year-old trans/nonbinary teenager. Please, if you're going to mention something about how I'm mentally ill or just trying to be trendy or some bullshit, leave. I don't want those comments because, frankly, I hear them every day and don't need to be reminded again. 


My parents don't fully know about my gender identity. I attempted to tell them when I was 14, but they basically told me I was just a tomboy and it has never been brought up again. My dad thinks being trans is a mental illness and transitioning to match your identity is equivalent to self harm. They know I've wanted a haircut for years. I bug my mom about it every couple days. My mom gets seriously angry at me for it because she's annoyed with my nagging, but I'm also annoyed because there are a lot worse things I could be doing to my body than just cutting my hair. I could be out fucking everyone who'll have me and getting a fucking drug addiction, but I'm not and never would. All I want is a damn haircut. She's straight-up told me, ""you're a girl and I don't want you to have a boy's haircut."" At least she's not using shitty excuses anymore and actually being honest. Doesn't make it any less ridiculous tho.


It's gotten to the level where I'm just angry all the time at everyone and everything because I feel so out of control. It's of course not *just* the hair that's causing it. It's a lot of things they've done that have hurt me, things that have affected my relationships with other people and my own mental health. Just the general knowledge that my parents refuse to accept me for who I am. The hair is just an offset of that.


I have a history of depression, self harm, and suicidal thoughts and this whole ordeal has put me back into an extreme dark place. I'm worried for my own health at this point, and I know some people will see this and think ""come on -- it's just a haircut"", but it goes so much beyond that. It goes into feelings of never being good enough, of feeling like a trophy to my parents, of having my appearance matter more to them than my comfort, of just feeling extremely invaluable to them as a whole, of knowing that they do not show the same respect for me that I do for them. It's caused me to act out and get into rather large arguments with them lately and I feel sick and sad all the time.


Maybe this post doesn't even belong on this sub. I'm unsure of where I should post. But would I be the asshole if went and got my hair cut without their permission/against their explicit wishes?? Is it illegal for me to do so?? Would the hair stylist get in trouble because they cut a minor's hair without parents' permission?? I don't want anyone else to get in trouble due to my actions either. Should I just tough it out another couple years so I can get a haircut then??


Again, I think this is kind of a validation post and I apologize. I just need to know I'm not alone in this. I need to know that I'm not being stupid or sensitive.",3.798653001464132,5.001653493411421,4.958190629575405,83.84477057101027,71.89897510980965,7.8066061493411425,28.30128843338214,8.238735603445708,1.8701672269399712,2668,100,537,40,50,881,274,683,0.207,0.7170000000000001,0.076,-0.9987,5,1,2,0,0,1,75.0,0,2,12,4,33,36,12,1,32,0,60,17,8,8,8,135,124,47,2,23,34,8,13,1,0,10,7,1,0,5,42,34,0,3,19,1,0,8,18,27,0,0,15,15,76,9,80,84,19,59,0,5,1,2,43,28,3,14,19,382,118,0,0.0,0.0,0.11637090250499182,0.06500010936362306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061753573507886635,0.0,0.04768213378615413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04054708104774343,0.06252206745681639,0.0,0.0,0.05913203139692725,0.041691223797343024,0.061092913530140236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045847985749038034,0.0,0.18173439613755324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273351449099141,0.06509511572879845,0.06622999299368483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250270895619315,0.0,0.051361704074753024,0.0,0.0,0.0668745675833674,0.09521150705812308,0.13194797534436806,0.0,0.07690645377098818,0.0,0.05135497125764606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061017131163399324,0.0,0.0,0.06914613242237015,0.0,0.04980908132560535,0.0,0.0,0.0616086191040062,0.0,0.039381785535936055,0.0,0.10047335845545648,0.11394858769505588,0.053587153489765435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808893116594812,0.0425961501734832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024480245293723,0.2180614068448196,0.0,0.03388629199531799,0.050010666030595737,0.09537520436078864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675728747194534,0.06720176877360699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638298530255302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05299748720558603,0.0,0.06209031792729418,0.19661022062445105,0.0,0.06725965749479347,0.06313432253686338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029129789389282193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06508778937355643,0.10138217664107484,0.0,0.0,0.03980018624422404,0.0,0.05990138044809836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18026409006413185,0.12650551870596927,0.0,0.1396642841861382,0.0,0.0,0.04383127490966258,0.13263366511460928,0.13795955120917572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06256646369258884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3310328291184522,0.0,0.0,0.08267300928157996,0.0,0.1245909808388763,0.06545040373607103,0.05636494813015006,0.0,0.2855215970937872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05993964737327175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401499346490762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04751344800178623,0.0,0.18660580379719569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045902279243348026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044026210318874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05211492488786125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883670851371073,0.11461598029208975,0.0,0.09467126467943196,0.06953569644003132,0.0,0.0,0.11394858769505588,0.0,0.04048149747267263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05149690227807413,0.0,0.049196913623803,0.21101040851235145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0552730220035191,0.0,0.13313848592192065,0.1371317380047151,0.11495284780442774,0.0,0.0,0.060552136154279415,0.06076302348358195,0.1694237092770123,0.06519063596489254,0.0,0.11518973881613435
mentalhealth,luciddreemer19,2020/01/19,"Was it Trauma/Emotional Abuse? *TW?* 
IThis is really hard for me to write because I don’t know if I’m overreacting. I probably am. I’m sorry.....but here goes.


I’m an 18 year old college student and I had a rough time with my family growing up.  My dad worked and my mom stayed home, meaning my mom was my primary parent I was around. 


I grew up being spanked, and I don’t think that is abusive in and of itself, but I remember her chasing me around the apartment with a ruler/belt because I was afraid. I remember being yelled at a lot when I made mistakes. Not like raising your voice, but her just going completely off on me. I said the phrase “screwed up” and i didn’t realize what it meant and that it was “bad” because I was literally 7 years old, and i got completely chewed out in the car in front of my cousin.


From when I was 12 until now, my relationship with my mom deteriorated. I had anxiety and depression, and she ignored it. Made me feel like a mistake. She would scream at me if I forgot to wash a pan or left cups in my room. She was never patient. If I cried she would tell me that I shouldn’t be crying and that I was overreacting. She would skew the story when telling my dad to get him on my side, and when I cried he would get mad as well.


They eventually let me get medicated for my mental health, but they never tried to help me besides that. Never talked to me about it, and always told me how “hopefully you’ll be off the medication soon because it’s bad for you and it costs money.” Never hoping I was feeling better for myself - always making me feel guilty about my depression and anxiety.


It never really got physical. My mom hit me a few times in the car when she got angry, which scared the heck out of me. She always threatened “the belt”, but because after 13 I was old enough to resist “the belt” she never actually went through with it. The last time I was spanked, I was 13.


If I cried too loud, she would tell the that the neighbors would call the cops and take me away. It used to get me to stop crying, but when I was 17 I told her to “let them” because I hated living with them so much. 


Senior year of high school my mom and I fought every day, and i can honestly say that she started most fights. I was extremely suicidal, and I thought about taking my life every single day for months (from about January of 2019 to present, so basically a full year). I never have attempted, but it has really taken a toll.",3.170756912565388,4.531611529411767,4.620649621009932,85.04236975552473,73.66531440162271,7.866958471228782,24.94122984947155,8.452757503120043,1.5017456389452328,1896,59,398,33,38,633,230,493,0.20800000000000002,0.747,0.044000000000000004,-0.9982,1,0,0,0,3,0,61.0,0,3,4,3,21,22,5,2,22,0,40,7,0,5,7,80,77,40,1,15,13,9,5,2,1,8,5,6,3,0,21,27,1,3,11,0,2,7,12,15,1,0,32,11,87,7,54,30,7,68,0,2,0,1,46,25,2,9,37,282,108,5,0.0,0.14572305247866196,0.06001025498530192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350631348271992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408702236995327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094871858770986,0.0,0.0,0.0577765823234473,0.0,0.10269152253649506,0.22492070887936855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05438733536916175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279327656534063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12895268736393745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33774688192395824,0.07931838288552179,0.0,0.1059311169233905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691736046223295,0.0,0.06354077973340737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10362438943674852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0579720186357009,0.0,0.09328116808525712,0.04393204449356725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285144098545469,0.0,0.034949028999035174,0.0,0.14754952165264915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05508744642538762,0.060713586963865016,0.0,0.06536631562267346,0.0,0.0,0.041218806187538835,0.06497285003062829,0.06168450490182242,0.12215683271566816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033796047002624965,0.050126637427703714,0.0,0.0,0.06681450382911401,0.12576561986890467,0.043435741281975436,0.060086707288154975,0.0,0.05430121683971193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052280854923633886,0.0,0.11637612291625413,0.04104839394669019,0.0,0.0,0.06698608929059978,0.0,0.12389949765854386,0.0619725021552127,0.0,0.0,0.3601110383237897,0.04908472700310816,0.0,0.045205905033638236,0.0,0.33200117711302285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935859923176156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828292659516688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663020172665776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181858263241414,0.0,0.0,0.0660226224600562,0.13932370787196105,0.0,0.05849583281400246,0.048903296910827766,0.061567228784258216,0.06223622902018624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04352648168048251,0.06554549410556579,0.0,0.05141257848633427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726555539797582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247318255951384,0.049427356343236216,0.16124803694426568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03940351671343045,0.0,0.048820165616142885,0.10757469738883822,0.0,0.0,0.1175222268728562,0.0,0.04175107235965163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053111940702321885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05529139554649403,0.05700648655014257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0447690966883442,0.0,0.0,0.2621057268289135,0.0,0.0,0.15840307039525411
mentalhealth,bostonkid617,2020/01/19,This breakup has really ruined me. I wake up with anxiety and fear. I try to sleep longer to not feel the pain.  I toss and turn and just feel anxious and panic. We broke up and I can’t quite cope with it. She has a new BF but I can’t stop being in pain. I’m so fearful about how long this will last. I have considered suicide.,-1.2291549295774615,0.8184889718309876,0.9733661971831004,100.72990845070423,95.90140845070421,4.530140845070423,15.550704225352113,6.2581,-0.6297109859154926,251,6,62,3,10,83,52,71,0.311,0.622,0.067,-0.9557,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,1,0,0,1,4,7,0,3,2,0,7,4,2,1,0,15,11,8,1,0,3,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,0,2,9,0,8,9,0,7,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,39,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619326925743469,0.2391353004479717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.476392028982105,0.21406098785344346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17254539816233588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18732790842178776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20443942892824168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4504795255194087,0.2483579139526585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22514505554386294,0.0,0.0,0.13560601379958304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21183035063198608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697185130902307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315408061331451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14371511383325195,0.2302443131817613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bipolar-wanderlust,2020/01/19,"Mental illness and drug abuse runs in my family 2 cousins have died of a drug overdose my brother died of a heart attack as was a cocaine addict my sister has severe anxiety and had a break down my mother had agoraphobia my father anger issues and alchohol dependency.  I have a schizophrenic cousin as well.

 The ones not doing drugs or with diagnosed mental illness are agressive, some have been in jail lots on welfare.

I have bipolar disorder but am high functioning with it.

Despite bipolar I'm the only one to have gone to university and have a successful career live and work in my 9th city and 5th country I chose a different path. 

I'm gay but if I wasn't I wouldn't have children with that family history. 

I wonder how much of that can be caused by poverty as I grew up poor in northern england as all my family are poor as well. 

Which has the bigger impact poverty or genetics ?",4.70306342780027,6.363287052631584,5.825380116959064,76.72595141700408,70.28654970760235,8.770310391363024,30.69770580296896,9.265573868473778,2.925902024291498,710,30,124,15,13,236,107,171,0.20600000000000002,0.742,0.052000000000000005,-0.9753,1,0,4,0,1,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,3,5,2,0,10,0,21,12,1,3,1,23,25,17,2,2,6,6,0,0,0,1,10,0,0,1,4,9,0,0,1,0,2,3,3,2,2,2,6,0,14,3,21,17,4,13,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,7,0,91,18,3,0.0,0.16475275116128293,0.0,0.1515861643360832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637366923323804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15819063835440622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284372713564464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113388421440345,0.2886260638686177,0.1452787470755033,0.15936454499835528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4837652010989356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3932548515069063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16477615846119545,0.0,0.14691506403769436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513316494057482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278462073882125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821622639964725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802614974844804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022185178850568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18844917424490504,0.10575458600787616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708810214567714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500471785866681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150794927359976,0.10123081723792772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SLIMETHIS,2020/01/19,"Loneliness and self worth issues Hey, not sure if this is right to post here but ive been struggling for a while with issues to do with feelings of loneliness and very little self worth due to it I guess.

I feel like I just need to get it out of my system and any help/advice would be greatly appreciated! 
Ill try not to go on a massive rant but basically I feel like I can't connect with anyone, I graduated university a couple of years back and my job (due to me being self employed) is not very social so meeting new people is hard, plus the fact that I can be shy and introverted does not help at all. 

I keep trying to crawl out of these episodes where I feel so low and unworthy, comparing myself to other people who are more successful than me, have great social skills/life, have immense confidence but I still fall into these pits and from most of what I read and watch they all state that a close support group is essential in helping to deal with these issues but it feels like I have no one that cares or understands me. At the moment I am focusing on my work and trying to get my career going and to be fair I have been trying to cultivate a routine of waking up early mediating and working out and I have been on track mostly but on days like these I just give up because I feel like there is no point. I will die lonely and depressed with nothing to show for it.
Guess I just need some advice/words of encouragement to help me with my battle.

For context, I am a 26yr Male, with no close family in my country and only my house mate who I can call a close friend.",4.551900269541775,5.228510191823903,5.455336927223723,82.92160377358492,69.72327044025158,8.321293800539085,26.149146451033243,8.418075326091056,1.5677976639712488,1243,35,254,18,21,408,170,318,0.163,0.669,0.16699999999999998,0.6748,2,2,0,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,1,3,10,18,1,1,9,0,27,2,1,0,4,63,46,25,1,4,14,0,7,5,2,2,1,0,0,4,16,29,0,1,7,2,2,3,8,5,0,1,3,8,35,13,48,37,6,38,0,3,1,0,21,22,0,7,15,180,51,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208075285880636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407983131359596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588801263019152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724572797091645,0.0,0.05744191269729265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621966590131373,0.0,0.09607406500150936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042640281834564,0.0,0.06077074424628719,0.09714729562595878,0.08116041427074991,0.0,0.0977961682784914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246156541371064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883193503921617,0.0,0.28587400814187924,0.2692725638633672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280209150867148,0.0,0.09846287895840053,0.09039428450206193,0.10710649540204474,0.0,0.0,0.2077784639157478,0.2076105852377285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441183483858808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526423195062318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087291078427506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950558358675332,0.09350902696676508,0.08375621505724677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301808098180799,0.09444350992056742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974113824273493,0.0,0.0910082052721144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041650863795417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638528860123548,0.07166638487753688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306548425203059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907808589049132,0.0,0.09024657413250037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425579420161817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047215633490845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949082429727149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19211183636170984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525243462704582,0.0,0.0,0.09850996303150007,0.0,0.0,0.10693142111711444,0.08881093706266463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559047371440801,0.0,0.0,0.09809705941555744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554997225300042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137201552831016,0.0,0.0,0.0669384973619382,0.0,0.0,0.060681219968326684
mentalhealth,sandypelampung,2020/01/19,"Question, is it your responsibility to take care of your significant other's mental health, even if they're not communicating their needs well? I'm asking this because I still feel guilt over my breakup and how I still feel like I worsened my ex's depression. But at the same time his negativity was getting very toxic and I couldn't handle it anymore. But I feel guilty for thinking that too since I feel like I'm the negative one and I'm afraid that people will leave me when I stop pretending like I'm okay.",5.165157142857144,6.41187103,5.793428571428574,78.97100000000002,68.7,8.514285714285714,28.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.035171428571429,413,14,81,7,7,134,72,100,0.201,0.634,0.165,-0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,1,0,7,9,0,2,2,1,4,1,0,1,0,18,18,8,0,3,4,1,4,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,6,1,0,0,4,3,1,1,1,4,14,6,5,15,1,7,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,2,8,49,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19543474182254225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842284329736426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201285122474719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009200939219802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16973111377945455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301590509729442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3985663391732684,0.28156541945628194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295791527005548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20947003820075688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086625426802802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28882685411693265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985943718900086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146120613404115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13353580755212416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366195092823905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22075701346989532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16301354944548066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31475146248649283,0.16475450202361255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481677596386355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262707875238335,0.0,0.0,0.1149097245618588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625986100155097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17718438965037644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Triox,2020/01/19,"What paperwork do I need to ask for to show my job? Or how should I properly explain my situation? Or am I just screwed right now? I live in California.

I went to my primary doctor the other day about my frequent memory loss.  During this visit the doctor told me that I have had anxiety disorder, and has diagnosed me with it a while ago, but I wasn't informed (or he told me and I forgot.  go figure). He said I need a Neurocognitive evaluation. On Friday, after calling out from work to handle important things, I had probably the worst day in my life in a VERY LONG time, and had, I guess it was, a 3.5 hour anxiety attack. So now I'm also wanting to get on anxiety medicine because I don't want my life held hostage for hours by any more attacks.

The big problem is it has been affecting my work badly. I'm forgetting things, and it's greatly straining my job position. I keep getting talked to and they are getting more serious and I feel I'm getting very close to having my job in jeopardy.  **I can't lose my job**.  I'm moving into a studio apartment in a week to get out of a bad living situation.  If I lose my job, or even get demoted I won't be able to afford the place.

So, tomorrow I am calling a Psychiatrist office near my new apartment about anxiety medicine.  I am also waiting to hear from my health insurance about a where I can go to do the evaluation that is in-network. I can't go to an emergency room because the visit would financially make it where I can't pay the 1st month rent. But work has expressed that the expectation of my job requires me to be able to handle it immediately. I'm thinking they are tired of my explication/excuses even though they say they are supportive. (""We are supportive, but we need to have these things you are messing up fixed now"").

So....is there a paperwork I can ask the psychiatrist and psychologist when I see them that says ""Here is what we are working on to correct Triox's mental problems, and it may take some time to kick in"" that I can give to my job, so that they can't just write me up/fire me on the next mistake? Or is there a way I can explain it better?

Sorry for the long post.",3.8435058243727616,4.928511159722227,5.578172043010756,79.89048387096773,71.66203703703705,9.000119474313022,29.907706093189965,9.370254747372089,2.6178601254480283,1679,69,339,37,31,576,202,432,0.154,0.8029999999999999,0.043,-0.9931,9,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,3,1,6,9,23,19,3,1,24,0,42,8,0,3,1,58,83,26,0,12,11,0,1,0,0,4,7,4,3,0,22,16,0,5,6,1,2,7,7,15,0,0,12,6,58,4,47,65,4,54,0,3,1,1,31,24,1,9,21,235,80,15,0.14456995337682332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407627040835583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561253948376007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049156262905590435,0.0,0.22119123725581266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351533908981571,0.1644691927622473,0.0,0.0,0.12070987237866072,0.08812850172871772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393018770457706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762208628753115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323565995421326,0.0,0.0,0.07336772975193215,0.0,0.0,0.08284484576160844,0.1479734732346269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954870907336886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036549456134194414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265955012038337,0.06934233631796904,0.1232436541798975,0.0,0.0,0.0796944419873589,0.07963005130261618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683555002188279,0.08147042223992514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423722826767192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5021217992585902,0.06425020857471657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021140335115092,0.0,0.0,0.12765791747606367,0.12793985938736535,0.0,0.16173679826675366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04825078324155771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284625489395652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057697178753785876,0.07682749058774321,0.0,0.16079518288453015,0.0,0.06981328092186813,0.07687589276330688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552241556636081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922902625439356,0.0,0.07793543074455911,0.13833392078294215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06173097513350105,0.06875956592378234,0.11496782953829307,0.0,0.0,0.057601767653183186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625026848391483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091711334447034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16405626986056154,0.0,0.0,0.05434930649334052,0.058099926155893426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406877968987816,0.04631729432250127,0.07101962258549166,0.0,0.08429990241479386,0.08308094715369188,0.0,0.13814278586079928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11928535212622275,0.08527110417998425,0.05737644990654706,0.057982648136864434,0.0,0.0,0.06700889758234965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21049729575632392,0.0,0.0,0.0513491734821478,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lithiumic,2020/01/19,"Help me survive my internship I’m a college senior right now. I have succesfully passed all my exams and classes. The only thing i have left to do is two mandatory internships. 

My mental is health is not as stable as it should be, i have been feeling quite depressed lately depite being proud that I have almost graduated college. I have social anxiety and i’m super anxious on doing these internships.

I tried doing my first internship last year but literally anything that could have gone wrong, did go wrong. The people were always yelling at me and being verry rude. I got jobs that had nothing to do with my education, they pushed me in other rooms to do irrelevant shit to get rid of me and on top of all that they told stories about me that weren’t true at all. It felt like I was back in highschool, this one time, these adults would sat at a table during lunch, i would go sit at their table and try to socialise despite my anxiety. When they saw me they all got up, and sat at another table leaving me alone. 

Ofcourse me being a instable anxious mess, had anxiety and panick attacks on the daily. I left crying, cried all night and cried when i had to back. Eventuelly i ended this internship, failed the course and had to do an extra year of college.

Now a year later I have to try again. I’m terrified and i don’t know how to get through this. This internship lasts 3 months, the next one lasts 6 months. After this i can finally graduate... but i just don’t know how to get through this..

Does anyone have any tips for me on how to get through this day by day? To think more positive and to not cry in the bathrooms during breaks lol?",4.874455110107284,5.8797128881987595,5.546132128740826,81.36853190287975,69.1863354037267,8.463241106719368,28.611518915866746,8.710501217029153,2.1180695652173918,1298,45,249,21,22,421,166,322,0.172,0.743,0.085,-0.9861,2,1,0,0,1,0,34.0,0,0,5,7,13,12,3,0,11,1,37,3,1,3,6,36,58,20,0,4,5,0,2,1,0,3,1,1,1,1,18,12,1,0,5,0,0,5,5,8,0,4,17,4,36,4,39,33,7,52,0,2,1,0,9,18,1,1,28,178,54,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869659501970546,0.10208153045557856,0.0,0.0,0.0820123016756947,0.0,0.0,0.06702621166257565,0.10335188671184578,0.226201247967464,0.2226962430478968,0.0,0.06891753286561282,0.0,0.0811089409571291,0.0,0.0,0.11212962778748622,0.0,0.15157770757896752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869452572031363,0.0,0.4330672563273979,0.12712994660707444,0.0,0.08489215707999871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625313494347484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729755226293821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983640818480388,0.0,0.09463592515518583,0.10797093555862566,0.0,0.08383762718396247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20598037262848004,0.0,0.1120312348533128,0.0,0.15765965069891014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476784715852426,0.0,0.0,0.06606469319214603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097808557003896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833528104512427,0.2410259705738161,0.11118334348877286,0.1043639728479204,0.2141779495588756,0.0,0.0,0.048152897294710166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932830957320353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573440732430009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482285583831208,0.09249468733419072,0.0,0.09457384517915846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13357766290568712,0.07496159374056002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833116559444231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483387002358728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417225315484013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117349072391688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047255386683594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654808695825719,0.06315518286775049,0.0,0.0,0.057472870885653185,0.0,0.0,0.0941811587930006,0.0,0.2007533968839699,0.0,0.09628171744719408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003263743311672,0.2155263092529803,0.0,0.19041399814097615
mentalhealth,xandrin,2020/01/19,"My ex just posted a picture of her and her new SO having sex Nothing explicit, think pg13 sex scene in a movie.

We broke up a month ago because she wanted to explore a poly sexual relationship with him. We were talking about marriage, kids and had looked at houses together in November.

I’m in pieces.",3.7784482758620714,5.877609603448278,5.0064137931034525,79.82996551724139,73.65517241379311,8.088275862068969,28.84137931034483,8.841846274778883,2.5445200000000003,239,10,43,5,5,79,49,58,0.051,0.9490000000000001,0.0,-0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,10,7,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,7,0,9,5,1,10,0,1,1,2,11,5,0,0,3,28,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929047184758239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20142600235656088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.381269851649506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27747652065034845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637446872613725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191296756814173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31705483029361137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164589373908737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547562954114128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655857216049662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211725088985906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19489515076944866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moodistry,2020/01/19,"Jaw clinching after discontinuing Abilify I discontinued Abilify about six months ago because of a movement disorder in my right arm.  Discontinuing was hellish - terrible depression.  But I got through it, and the movement issue resolved, thankfully.

But unfortunately since discontinuing I've also had an issue with constant clenching of my jaw (bruxism).  I've been taking muscle relaxants, and although they help a bit, I swill clench, and the muscle relaxants don't address the underlying problem.  I'm concerned about the impact on my teeth.    

My doctors have nothing to offer.  I am seeing a neurologist in a month or two to follow up about the movement disorder and will ask them if they've seen it, though I don't think he has much knowledge about second generation anti-psychotics like Abilify, but who knows.

Anyone else have this problem after discontinuing Abilify?",8.701020408163266,10.625735190476194,8.926673469387758,57.24511224489797,61.04081632653061,11.3221768707483,41.910884353741494,11.20814326018867,5.653724353741495,711,40,94,20,10,234,97,147,0.12300000000000001,0.8109999999999999,0.066,-0.85,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,1,6,10,1,0,10,0,10,5,4,0,0,16,20,12,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,4,2,0,4,2,5,0,3,5,2,11,5,17,14,2,16,1,1,2,0,7,6,0,2,7,68,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525592977105567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13763104280080266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203387128731255,0.17634029203898693,0.0,0.0,0.16089346545312036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491264743042453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18789236025328607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185982656168104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482324234669104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3944908593394732,0.1761551430240757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14377032358781885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376468269266788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535729464668056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592625132312571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458353874289288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408103773616858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747426157752832,0.0,0.12651581617887322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16513787315217146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32935945974535635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697538032935606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714414344113166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423657274979338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940035331080352,0.0,0.0,0.15844970631926525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11027692230933114,0.1690907363406486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681200337423927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oraorgoglio,2020/01/19,"Hey Reddit, I'm low and lacking motivation. What do you do to cheer yourself up when you feel like that? Life hasn't been nice lately and I'm feeling run down. Needing some tips to pick myself up :)
Counceling session is in a couple of days, that's arranged.",1.5676470588235285,4.122452333333335,2.76421568627451,90.3839705882353,84.49019607843138,4.184313725490196,24.18627450980393,5.46131890053228,0.4595333333333334,203,8,39,1,6,65,43,51,0.078,0.7,0.222,0.8057,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,1,1,4,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,2,0,9,10,3,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,3,3,7,9,2,9,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,1,4,24,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4621140380451467,0.0,0.26934518556340004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4223457011851646,0.29836424409654244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4711194975342862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949936035020452,0.2040392748271212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096769940671718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,timothy_lee,2020/01/19,"What's wrong with me????? I'm a gambling addict and I steal all the time to support my habit.  Three credit card companies have sued me, I've stolen from multiple employers, friends, family, everybody.  I just can't help myself.  For some odd reason I started working as a card dealer at a casino and I stole from them too. I feel like I have to win, win, win at all costs and if that means lying, destroying reputations, friendships and lives, that's what I do.  People keep telling me I'm a narcissist and a complete entitled psychopath.  I didn't think so for the longest time but after my father died recently I started questioning myself.  I don't know anymore about anything.  Do I even deserve to live???",1.9838630377524176,4.754820582089553,3.334863915715541,85.1926207199298,85.71641791044777,6.436523266022828,25.7928007023705,7.724431198458867,1.9140488147497805,554,24,100,11,17,180,88,134,0.163,0.7,0.13699999999999998,-0.6693,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,4,5,10,1,0,7,0,7,1,0,1,2,19,17,9,1,1,3,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,6,1,4,0,3,3,0,1,1,1,19,7,13,16,3,8,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,3,7,65,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21751589729761767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978790035010582,0.0,0.0,0.16419524201134986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20920220229227915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20707944402719386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317869231590167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18809804150400855,0.0,0.100887781375489,0.14254344980524858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541554940138513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373998179588542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735040905167346,0.0,0.0,0.10965583744321028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747971717485067,0.0,0.3523752589337729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21734541077055125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832818107719258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22351797553455244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051488885598402,0.19701066734066816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824550930029861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22642297365795494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439700887526688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785003000744874,0.0,0.0,0.2326937531867117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14525937866505914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181534741423328,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SignsFromWithin,2020/01/19,"I feel... good? Read my previous posts and you will see pretty much depressive posts exclusively. A week ago I had a breakdown that left me afraid I would hurt myself soon. It was unbelievably scary. The day after, on Monday, I felt all calm and relaxed. It was so weird. Less than a day before I was crying my eyes out feeling afraid I would hurt myself. Now, here I was, calm and relaxed. Not only did I feel calm and relaxed, but I also felt optimistic. I felt like this is the year I will see improvements. I turn 24 in a few weeks, and so far, my 20’s have been just full of depressive periods. But... 2020 is the year things will change. I am going to start making friends and, after I’ve started making friends, I am going to start dating people. And this is all happening this year. I’ve been a loner for 14 years, but I won’t be a loner for 15 years. This is the year everything changes.

I don’t think I’ve ever felt this optimistic about my social and my romantic life. Certainly not in many, many years. I had completely given up. I’ve been trying to accept life as a loner for years now. This is very weird but also very real. Perhaps it’s the fact that, because of how I felt on Sunday in regards to harming myself, I know I cannot allow for anything else to happen. It HAS to work. And it HAS to work this year. I’m not sure I could go on like this for another year or two. So this will be the year things changes.

What have I done so far? I’ve reached out to my cousin who has never been in a similar situation. She is very kind and supportive and has offered to help me through this. I will start attending a biweekly gaming evening at the university, and I will also attend a speed friending event at the university next month. I do my best to keep negativity out of my life now. Anyone who doesn’t seem supportive or is kind of negative towards me will be out of my life. Oh and I also want to see if there is any speed dating events in my city. Not the biggest city in the world but I am sure there must be something. If not, I will check out some online dating stuff and ask my cousin for some help. Or maybe my new group of friends will be helpful too. Perhaps one of them is someone I’d be interested in dating. Or perhaps some of them know someone looking for a date.

Sorry for this long post but I feel like it was needed. Time to share some positive stuff here and not just depressive things.",2.5090359333917647,4.275543588957056,3.8394668419515057,88.27271472392641,76.30061349693251,6.947531405200117,23.503797838153663,7.793537801064563,1.0632399065147529,1881,58,397,28,42,617,209,489,0.099,0.701,0.201,0.9953,0,0,1,0,0,4,61.0,0,1,2,3,23,35,0,2,21,0,55,5,1,4,9,78,92,37,0,8,20,2,9,3,4,13,4,0,0,0,27,20,0,1,14,5,1,5,13,10,0,2,19,14,51,25,53,53,11,79,0,5,5,0,21,25,0,11,49,278,78,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05671532860714115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466244761563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04350929893425926,0.06708969555079575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044737028468160314,0.0,0.0526509416362456,0.0,0.05981363247507921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03900224609941905,0.0,0.05444314977442663,0.0,0.06714415066182912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030503596210961,0.0,0.06708289965127891,0.0,0.0,0.05108365159128711,0.0,0.07028016445657555,0.08252495125742074,0.0,0.16532031937723668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547481424799126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05344794626485702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04225887129656376,0.0578745106454077,0.0,0.0,0.05750203023189005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940293820801466,0.04570806537625779,0.3071591438156882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977263608568841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908569273791956,0.053664257993429394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131564388414276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865542063906407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369860460706177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056869285137376185,0.0,0.13325280803522532,0.07032460900294557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951558354063275,0.0,0.1807667933572688,0.09377370812004443,0.0,0.0,0.0566212040811884,0.05372795676130301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541567758725313,0.12973345791153096,0.06427755096408233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05106905304992914,0.0,0.04703342369993711,0.047441127985045024,0.0493461197805124,0.06179328390046364,0.0680445583404262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043355206285277316,0.04866046147835042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04435639485850535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838284413940384,0.06509171588443129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399835084044778,0.07282442695433496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529538077036609,0.05824593281855961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719173659098699,0.0,0.06522060955626813,0.10842184947695904,0.049255727854023226,0.0,0.07162153233991071,0.18114442823541213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648595930107874,0.0,0.1452098443917895,0.12060273974133592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751847337662367,0.04099646485279476,0.0,0.0,0.0373078570002218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04343892406881399,0.06959299527246142,0.06250017601178079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583731676502595,0.03773767311549795,0.0,0.10264345666927804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315791340266323,0.0,0.0,0.09090058547993568,0.0,0.0,0.4532185890150776
mentalhealth,aliaaho,2020/01/19,"I'm paranoid about food safety? I don't know if this is the place to post this, but is it normal? does anyone else have this thing where they are paranoid about the safety of food?

I can eat the foods, but if I - at any point - get an idea in my head that it may not be safe (cooking chicken etc) I'm paranoid about it nd it makes me really struggle to eat it.

Particular foods include rice, pasta, chicken, pork, eggs, untoasted crumpets and muffins, oranges, bananas and more I can't even think of right now.

one example is of rice I was cooking for a curry. it was boiling and I strained it, and I tried a bit to see if it was cooked. It was still a bit hard to chew - meaning I hadn't left it long enough. This automatically made me extremely paranoid about its safety. I told my self to get over it, and it would be fine and served up my dinner. I got about 2 mouthfuls in and started thinking about it again. I literally couldn't eat the rice, so put it to the side, I was going to eat the chicken but then started worrying that the chicken wasn't cooked either, even though it was obvious it was. I ended up binning the entire dinner and having toast that night.

It's awful. My mum was eating boiled eggs the other day, and she said if was a bit runner than she liked. I automatically got really paranoid and worried that she was going to get ill from it. She is fine, and said it was cooked just funnier, but I saw it that it was raw. And she was going to get food poisoning.",3.1310391304347824,4.450667196666672,4.3256231884058,87.28186956521742,73.7,6.817391304347826,25.3768115942029,7.255503002510835,1.030802898550725,1149,37,243,12,23,377,146,300,0.136,0.797,0.067,-0.968,0,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,1,0,15,7,1,2,14,1,30,27,2,2,1,36,54,23,0,7,11,1,1,1,0,2,2,2,0,1,33,12,23,1,5,6,0,5,6,3,0,1,22,5,27,4,27,27,7,28,0,0,2,0,11,12,0,5,11,167,60,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036990169340095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062073397568608676,0.09096026369038143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907572359628702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05725239565674022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768741732710252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4541938661806252,0.07415994605196753,0.0,0.07862811454598018,0.0917280894867777,0.09900735785881094,0.1172698236164338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5367341447033914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855246557712671,0.0,0.15135827761084245,0.0,0.14200261923834034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952477505795093,0.0,0.09110854648427433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021593266382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04878830314583374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645406952772008,0.0,0.0,0.04337087840453337,0.0,0.0,0.07856289592962917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840008531668514,0.059257861943592935,0.0,0.0,0.0967017719738001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330912702686345,0.08698044592522945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06015609548878314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275076122336506,0.0,0.0839208714818246,0.0,0.0850217095903827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924318411973374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374280788509995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758131859495651,0.16889030979723138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074201424277338,0.0,0.09261146745590226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567050714150207,0.0,0.07089566229335473,0.0,0.0,0.0928066860059044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05897802608028775,0.11376660224655592,0.0872207808397283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482811659305918,0.0,0.060272255355429925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18031021777646405,0.0,0.06306306403129973,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,katembers,2020/01/19,"Does Autism change over age? I've always thought it was this permanent neurological thing. A difference in the hardwiring of the brain and that's not supposed to really ever change in any substantial manner.

When I was a little kid I certainly had some cliché symptoms. Being socially awkward, excelling at maths at a young age, being a so-called gifted child, I was super sensitive to light and cold, I never made eye contact, I didn't greet strangers, I was obsessed with analyzing things,…

Parents never brought me to a psychologist so I only got diagnosed with Atypical Autism when I was 19. But honestly I don't think I'm really that autistic right now? My psychiatrist refuses to even question her diagnosis, so, well, no help asking her about it.

But looking at the signs of being autistic, honestly, I don't feel like I fulfill many of those.",7.0136129032258046,8.123749103225808,7.431774193548389,69.38766129032261,64.41935483870968,10.845161290322581,36.145161290322584,10.793553405168565,4.299632258064516,681,32,111,18,10,223,104,155,0.08,0.768,0.152,0.9206,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,2,9,9,0,2,8,0,12,5,2,1,4,19,21,8,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,7,4,0,1,4,0,0,1,7,2,1,0,11,5,15,7,16,7,1,18,0,0,2,0,11,8,0,2,10,75,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15230634225597264,0.0,0.0,0.12447543752606233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17112038701446686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043363938005517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3872702000530873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18578467363773168,0.0,0.19124085447062625,0.0,0.0,0.1601820607754598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12089809817311148,0.16557276744630506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255198167487354,0.13076587248110327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14639611514781878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268978637068093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942550698047705,0.18345705626670966,0.0,0.0,0.15370992153538385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17319960207338386,0.0,0.18557675406016896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823479118417256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13921236106078594,0.0,0.0,0.20324746036091185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20504992074991454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345239163854445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631762230198207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18658916850164528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902516417302804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160555831366901,0.11728648874080835,0.0,0.14531560333827992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16457753475128534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,671488,2020/01/19,"Do I possibly have tourettes? I am not sure if these are just bad habits but occasionally I:

twitch my arms

raise my eyebrows

close my eyes really tight

click my teeth in very specific patterns

stare at people or at random things (this one has got me in a few awkward situations)

sometimes these things happen together and with a word mumbled between them. I have never thought much of it but I met someone with tourettes and I think its possible I could have it. This has been going on for years.",2.3789007092198595,5.255084159574468,2.9054255319148936,88.1841666666667,85.06382978723406,6.112056737588652,24.854609929078013,7.492282038375204,1.4743078014184396,397,16,75,7,12,123,71,94,0.064,0.9359999999999999,0.0,-0.5619,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,10,4,3,0,2,19,16,6,0,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,4,4,13,1,10,11,2,9,0,0,3,0,2,6,0,3,2,56,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19466114229146333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18614234439442254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249814081803882,0.0,0.18646237923717127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20616385235917625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713838278917347,0.0,0.17981099895136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15798087036169892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162907448173014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5256578872619128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14935467171753342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620577557814599,0.0,0.0,0.19753773092312174,0.0,0.2305802138212489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197305401682721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3097740907774236,0.14938591588241792,0.0,0.18508614870948925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19236390898243436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501337299515496
mentalhealth,SupIWannaDie,2020/01/19,"Are old psych questionnaires/research completely unreliable? I’m like 80% certain I have schizotypal personality disorder, and I’ve done lots of research and it would explain so many things about me. I’ve shown my therapist some research papers and questionnaires, and she says they’re false because they’re dated back anywhere from the 60s to 90s. I couldn’t find any other resources that are more recent. Are they completely unreliable? Are there any questionnaires that are recent other than the SPQ?",7.441345514950168,10.164628616279074,6.489800664451832,70.4161627906977,65.16279069767442,10.030564784053157,34.37873754152824,10.290406445055957,4.2002179401993365,415,19,61,11,7,126,60,86,0.033,0.9009999999999999,0.066,0.4027,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,1,11,11,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,6,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,6,2,5,8,3,5,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,6,38,12,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961921840543939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674573690953527,0.0,0.13275507464127068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4566708967302812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495917544719368,0.0,0.0,0.22286187904303506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19904458764145347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063950316188812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851465478375015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22079209034030453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285207350419023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19015481549870175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4300577964002363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17318532021210445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252856333140801,0.14468162002860244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547028083916405,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fishboi200,2020/01/19,Recovering from psychosis I'm only 19 years old and I'm currently recovering from an acute psychotic episode in which I thought I was a shaman and related to pagan gods. I also thought Jews were trying to poison me and I was refusing to eat the food in hospital when I was sectioned because of it. Psychosis is extremely scary and i wouldn't wish it on anyone. I'm currently in the recovery process and I'm taking 10mg of olanzapine twice a day and I have been prescribed benzodiazepines to take when needed. I was discharged from the hospital ward about a week ago and I'm slowly getting better but some of the psychotic symptoms and anxiety are still there. Just thought I'd share my experience and let people know that you aren't alone with your mental health and things will get better if you receive the right treatment.,5.866363636363637,7.293462191082803,6.285917776491027,75.41697162709903,67.21656050955414,9.785524030110016,34.01795020266358,10.018931242160765,3.586622929936306,672,31,118,16,11,217,100,157,0.067,0.861,0.07200000000000001,0.3988,2,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,2,7,4,1,0,9,0,13,5,0,0,0,23,28,15,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,5,11,2,1,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,9,0,13,3,16,16,2,17,2,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,10,77,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15691474561376445,0.0,0.0,0.18333605787857898,0.0,0.14156030077313772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13541739595951718,0.0,0.0,0.12377428843307844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079078209605082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31311401480682177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416121577153307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18113241678140607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315643367245556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21404946221920906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18496798269741546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18816062028799316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728382434775508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810117093185893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783913371167437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13125574182895705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18574939322883952,0.0,0.0,0.13462928139258515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272118643229878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15117141178522422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14136587486858415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183988272411552,0.2661892631495896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760212099243693,0.0,0.0,0.4215947873483783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201828127843261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199222932959646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035606267596139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11399303944689207
mentalhealth,Alcatraz-12,2020/01/19,"Been a sex addict since 11 years old. Little background : I'm 18 years old, I started watching porn at the age of 11 but I didn't have good internet back then so it was mostly masturbating to my imagination. At first it was no problem. Then soon I started getting overwhelmed by the feelings and I couldn't stop myself from watching porn even if others were sitting next to me ( obviously they didn't have clear view of the screen or me. )

Soon after I started getting into relationships. At first I thought that I really was in love with every girl from them, but recently I realized that I never felt love, it was just extremely strong sexual impulses. I never grabbed women or forced them or anything like that, but the thoughts never stopped. Never. For 7 freaking years, it's only been getting worse. A lot worse. 

Sex and porn have been basically controlling my life. I stopped looking at women as other people whom I can form an emotional connection with. It was just the sex. As soon as I feel myself getting attached or something I gotta bail because I knew that it wasn't love it was just sexual. 

Anyway I lost my V card at like 15 or so. It was horrible. Not because I didn't know what to do or because I didn't like the girl I was with, but because I didn't feel anything. I was thrusting like an animal but I still didn't feel anything. The first time I did it like that for 15 minutes and I just told her to stop. Second time I did it for a long time and I still didn't feel anything. 

What I feel guilty about though is that sometimes I get a little rough during sex, like choking her and pulling her head closer when she's giving me a BJ until she gags. I don't mean to do it like that, I just get caught in the moment a lot.

What's really bad though is the amount of times it gets me in embarrassing situations, like getting caught kissing someone at school, having sex in the school bathroom, almost getting caught masturbating, people asking me why I take too long in the bathrooms, the countless times I got to school late because I woke up with a boner and had to jerk it off away because it hurts, not eating lunch because I spent lunch time jerking off ..

It's ruining my life, even when I was meaning to do homework and stuff I either start watching porn or get caught up sexting someone. 

I'm basically the guy from the movie ""shame"". I'm even at the later stage at the end of the movie where females don't even satisfy anymore ..",4.349006211180125,5.6232886211180135,5.036720496894411,83.53110559006213,70.65631469979296,7.590393374741201,29.12091097308489,7.957251820313856,1.8754448861283648,1936,74,376,25,35,624,206,483,0.12,0.74,0.14,0.8623,0,0,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,3,6,25,25,2,3,26,0,38,21,1,1,6,65,85,32,0,3,21,0,9,8,0,1,3,0,1,5,29,12,3,5,15,0,1,5,18,11,0,4,38,15,55,14,48,45,6,77,0,4,6,14,21,23,0,12,55,258,84,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199869647639084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613443350635159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.065498800267595,0.0,0.0,0.2173973220222592,0.0,0.061743071996428436,0.0,0.06205136354721536,0.050784456246565406,0.05514473807447005,0.2818225331757805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407497834333455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758042728798687,0.0,0.07429163020169792,0.05849618382729259,0.0,0.0,0.1744881509437592,0.0,0.05564568206285563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003657343580247,0.0,0.06341346728565572,0.0,0.0,0.16853329071446851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34505737645994605,0.06335629221329876,0.0,0.05539533393668603,0.05282214489618372,0.0,0.0,0.0653948408160727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778112783392451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707024381821998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03629655328656578,0.0,0.07450153103563514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329894101876787,0.2581296413428947,0.13238869349180066,0.0,0.11689532755148567,0.05546108746891873,0.0,0.07209581702717212,0.1122980351196401,0.1788243195406031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388452940700802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037516131542067,0.0,0.0702395071278865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13860603845460184,0.0,0.0,0.050230127349128934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915744444175584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319605578291036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846201163222397,0.0,0.0652113772680436,0.07090751276485427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20052291347659507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054633028992032096,0.0742372418698469,0.0,0.0,0.11191926959177616,0.05084459554257182,0.06532010110826153,0.0,0.18698769848079025,0.0,0.1054870949918194,0.22086599589402114,0.0,0.0,0.07560561662394184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04965755015799661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977757025006995,0.10486455665111746,0.2310678959439773,0.0,0.0,0.06310873827514772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595952553201974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461080381598833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759226289639153
mentalhealth,optimist96,2020/01/19,"Bipolar type 2 disorder Hey everyone I (23 year old female) just wanted to ask some advice. I think I have bipolar type 2 disorder. I have the low moods, and the hypo manic stages, and I also have a family history of mental health conditions.

I just wanted to ask, can this condition be managed without medication? I don't want the side effects and the diagnosis that comes attached to the meds.
I have a good support system. I function really well, I work full time and am completing my second degree. I live a healthy and active lifestyle, and I can identify my moods when they happen.

I've just been reading into the condition and I'm concerned my mental health will deteriorate with just lifestyle management. 

What do you guys think? I could really use some hope now😊

Thanks!!",3.9203645320197036,6.524475662068969,5.3761822660098515,74.96525862068968,75.13793103448276,8.55665024630542,28.28817733990148,9.23628265651192,3.017266009852217,621,26,102,16,14,208,92,145,0.053,0.794,0.153,0.9196,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,2,7,8,0,0,9,0,13,5,0,2,0,26,27,9,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,10,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,1,1,1,1,0,18,5,7,23,3,11,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,3,4,68,21,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471365400757899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041182105371245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28152769573783704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12970384982768446,0.15787115228376786,0.0,0.0,0.12021893778447125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3451355289871631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14387733791859522,0.0,0.0,0.14194522920494973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262920698108878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490892682595755,0.1331497108882301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201005199301283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14955128376449173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13295722405074048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672507799359419,0.1516847524668528,0.30348092855295666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15799925951097518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506120552922419,0.0,0.1929196717215976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708665366005939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386258310266715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19296002944167032,0.0,0.0,0.08779934088240864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004526621517448,0.0,0.0,0.2664325768663273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353816892806176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14514536829998914,0.0,0.10961770592566747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696298603692
mentalhealth,markemusen,2020/01/19,"Not being able to speak out about mental health issues is a big problem for many girls too. I often hear people say something like “guys have to start opening up about mental health problems”.  I would like to point out that this also applies to many girls. My girlfriend suffers from depression and I only recently learned that I am the only one she talks to about her problems, even though she has plenty of girl friends. She told me that no one in her friend group really speaks about their mental health. So girls, you can also get better at speaking up about your own problems, and asking how your friends are.",8.314736842105265,7.915014508771932,6.725263157894738,80.68684210526318,61.807017543859644,8.65263157894737,32.1578947368421,7.1686216300943375,2.022063157894737,490,15,87,3,6,144,80,114,0.149,0.721,0.13,-0.3612,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,3,1,1,13,12,0,0,2,0,8,3,0,1,0,14,13,7,0,5,1,0,0,2,4,1,3,5,0,5,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,2,1,5,15,6,19,10,1,11,0,2,0,0,27,9,0,1,4,63,19,1,0.12302863333968092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19677190726544372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501516452788454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088088283731065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596438161984477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125925201018387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851548507975516,0.0,0.0642773831004013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181768954046382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39232105248546256,0.13866221122253747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840992936420392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021115166691995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24946344819774904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719517772890539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673477191404912,0.18713763907474007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529256360814343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630182487458265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4708871469048549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881529284560151,0.0,0.12147593313801824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783730723948024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471345258008736,0.0,0.0,0.08708029990272681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888575523663233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208750076057466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755913143231993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739601126057503,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wisqrg50,2020/01/19,"life is hell and ppl are too dumb ppl who have cancer, ppl who have mental illness, ppl who are midgets, ppl who are born with no legs/arms. why is everyone so obsessed with reproducing and bringing chaos to this world?",4.970714285714287,6.3052051190476215,4.479523809523811,87.88214285714287,69.23809523809524,7.504761904761906,28.285714285714285,7.793537801064563,1.5150857142857153,173,6,35,2,3,52,29,42,0.405,0.595,0.0,-0.9724,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,1,0,0,7,3,0,0,0,4,8,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,3,1,0,0,0,4,1,2,0,1,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5307114592359632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3922976317270103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5597156882821663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5011649064607722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,umcute,2020/01/19,"I just feel so unwanted sometimes That’s all, I just needed to write it somewhere.",1.9987500000000007,4.755171375000003,3.017500000000002,87.67750000000002,85.25,5.7,26.75,7.1686216300943375,1.6513499999999994,66,3,12,1,2,21,14,16,0.172,0.828,0.0,-0.3593,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,2,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3785991755083064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5552013637109099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7405498700546619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stinkythrowwaway,2020/01/19,"A sexy little vent! Let's be real nobody who is gonna read this is gonna say anything or nothing. Only replying when it's a crisis situation but it's always a fucking crisis situation. Damn it all to hell! My god! Been pushing for a psychiatrist eval so I can get some good stuff to overdose on. I have given it enough time, suicide just seems kinda sexy at this point not gonna lie. The fucking stuff about finding ur passions is as fake as \*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\*\* (censored because people are complaining little bitches!) I found a passion alright but nobody wants me to do it! So thanks for nothing!

Watch me not die and my organs are fucked up, damn. Guess if I fuck em up once, a second time won't get too worse. Gotta lay my body somewhere nice so I'm missing for a bit, maybe get on the news. Attention sounds refreshing! My head feels like drinking water after having minty gum, it just don't feel right. 

I hate my girlfriend, my best friend! I hate my family! I don't have any bonds to them. My cat whom I care for dearly probably fucking hates me! At this point, thinking I just fulfill my ""passion"" then get killed, don't gotta do nothing myself plus it'll probably suffice for some cops wet dream to shoot someone and no penalty! Sounds great myself! Corruption is never good in places of power but can be beneficial sometimes.

Better not get locked up. I already feel shitty for any dime spent on me, I'll just escape or somethin then I'll attempt again. Everyone gives up! My only escapism method I gotta take a break from and man! Can't I just hug a cute girl then get my brains fucking blown out?

Imagine getting a girlfriend way out of your league who isn't your type just so you don't feel as fucking alone! WoW! Maybe that's a bit shitty of me.. no helping it now! Everyone acts all nice until they realize certain things! Sure! I drew the short end of the stick, almost every time! So what! Don't gotta call me that! 

How about you stitch your dirty mouth shut, you whore!

Spiraling like this, feels really good doesn't it! Too bad I need to go back to conformity soon! Oh sob for me! How boring will that be? Wonder how long I'll last this time! Want to take a bet? A day? Not even a day? 

Get me out of this fucking body already!",0.811284985310035,3.3172188744394653,2.1986516158960896,92.99547085201796,88.95515695067266,4.6902118447502685,20.46992423070976,6.311591054244273,0.2464502551414877,1742,57,355,18,58,559,237,446,0.188,0.589,0.223,0.9503,1,1,3,1,0,1,87.0,0,6,2,4,25,46,16,0,18,1,29,20,5,3,5,55,78,26,3,4,16,0,6,2,3,10,0,3,0,2,25,7,2,0,13,3,3,3,16,23,0,1,4,10,43,23,42,60,8,46,1,2,1,13,22,21,13,11,22,204,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943523642787683,0.07181661333592539,0.15303956719827125,0.0,0.05769746722983975,0.0,0.0,0.0943088432326699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706193299422872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331913406354004,0.057897039755945436,0.042269776843219364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276935429740014,0.061326692609299564,0.15140535165160585,0.15404497352565555,0.0,0.07740775735626751,0.07080515976219134,0.0,0.07069801643680566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943872783010537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719652604717077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792801758416414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061415757856102565,0.07164803791941947,0.0,0.0457992356337315,0.0,0.05842298611136914,0.13251705444423392,0.0,0.0,0.06536875069684095,0.0,0.17530507432080808,0.04953739634544988,0.0,0.0,0.06337663794917002,0.0,0.0,0.07602909156525216,0.05357287070171357,0.5128388788089765,0.2898234912786024,0.06651843670213872,0.03940822516619572,0.17448042895198795,0.0,0.0764489628751474,0.07638719443879667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053803588464889,0.07116411809960821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04647797211662605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671580928305899,0.0,0.0,0.0565223661758882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090611682082494,0.0,0.06775325547305693,0.1389962799348398,0.0,0.061364816144315985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932519313655065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05141565149880771,0.0534802397247604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19960437232704492,0.0,0.0,0.0738461584924747,0.0,0.1054742766626757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04807248555530425,0.0,0.07244683819719798,0.0,0.13109977141794102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952317132967666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936000561260196,0.07892551286016626,0.04442177449682739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05921704084428168,0.0,0.05514293790778643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312566142959483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588492008451954,0.0,0.0,0.05875260838360336,0.0,0.0685802602892087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875826214054234,0.07584806299270355,0.0,0.06535329891709835,0.0,0.1042719670478012,0.0,0.0,0.0638400983201829,0.0,0.0,0.04606723930102221,0.044431067284464235,0.0,0.0,0.1617337407572129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179852089073494,0.05503984944783395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519761784377679,0.0,0.0,0.07066464845285192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GreyShoTz,2020/01/19,"What should I do? My little sister is in the hospital under elopement for hurting herself with her phone after an argument with my mom. She started to bang her phone on her head and she missed school without my moms consent for 2 days. My mom works 2 jobs and my sisters take the bus to school. My mom came home early to see her at home. She took her to school where the head trauma lowered to her eyes. She had two black eyes. The school psychologist said to take her to the hospital because she had suicidal thoughts. She’s getting treated now, taking medications. I understand how unfair life is for her. My parents got separated and that really impacted her, she was abused as a 4 year old by her babysitter’s son, she’s had to take care of our younger sister when my mom works 2 jobs because she’s a single mom. I used to be obnoxious to her and I feel guilty of all this. I was never there for them, I chose my own path instead of being with my family. She’s been so strong through all the misery my family has been through. 

She called me at work the day after the argument and wanted to talk to me, hear my voice she said because she felt all alone. She’s never been the type of outgoing person so she doesn’t really like to socialize, she’s the shy type of person who doesn’t know how to be mean or rude to you. She’s always caring for everyone else. I remember one time she took blame for something I did and got punished for it. She’s always trying to clean the house so my mom rest instead of doing chores. She cooks dinner for my mom and sister, she’s an A student because she wants my mom to be relaxed about any issues that happen to her. I don’t think we’ve ever been happy in my family, except in the beginning. How assuring is the help she’s getting, how can I help her cope so she never feels this way again.",3.2479533413886017,4.708506835579513,4.41170926666047,86.21873315363884,73.63611859838275,7.4892090342968665,24.652941723208478,8.104835398774808,1.3495325030207272,1440,44,295,22,29,472,179,371,0.124,0.7909999999999999,0.085,-0.9087,4,1,1,0,2,0,31.0,1,1,1,4,17,13,2,0,18,0,25,8,4,5,8,39,57,18,1,3,3,15,3,1,0,1,2,4,4,2,7,11,2,0,9,2,0,3,7,5,0,2,19,11,69,8,51,33,6,30,0,2,4,0,69,9,0,1,18,205,76,12,0.0,0.07689693068245215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721773908198789,0.0,0.0,0.10800546329875026,0.0,0.0,0.044134824263333663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582518973770687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627105530988095,0.07422931746199546,0.13234154610535173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371139757019964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05421635773078736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058706562027600474,0.0,0.06201557255200053,0.0,0.0,0.1835483222204974,0.0,0.06563167043439495,0.0,0.062315023065136525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781606271751961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381432583486072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05739163425819625,0.06908819408370166,0.0,0.0,0.1332140545264713,0.0,0.07314800913821617,0.0,0.08700338424987976,0.0,0.13020174960475472,0.0,0.0,0.07488690229948672,0.06947773485147023,0.0,0.0,0.06773965742905881,0.12880821898599065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035667826599807016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04584141122064505,0.03170729192589908,0.06504773230063522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069608517323724,0.0,0.06538080915121365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6841001412709946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15016668008471135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810255654652933,0.0,0.043978516252180334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206474725681959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133378909596158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315433181789905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352004589816823,0.0,0.1234711989517051,0.0,0.0,0.2627326236995072,0.051717598986588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615827447513432,0.0,0.04996386855335375,0.0,0.0,0.045937177237282925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099102939134765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19518954038671188,0.05216486931742313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04158586362032441,0.0,0.05152404959181164,0.03784422531915025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14421453242303528,0.04406343763116394,0.0,0.06339872974913355,0.06756410541824928,0.0,0.056053522804087465,0.0,0.0,0.07656044164610437,0.05151529802708881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062562132776516,0.0,0.14174584183639852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04179403916156317
mentalhealth,JustDyls,2020/01/19,I have suddenly started making squeaking noises with my throat The other day late in the day i started doing it and i couldn't stop i can hold it in but it is really hard to,2.303693693693696,3.730482432432435,4.528108108108111,84.56531531531532,76.02702702702703,7.095495495495496,23.144144144144143,7.793537801064563,1.1606468468468467,138,4,28,2,3,48,28,37,0.061,0.8959999999999999,0.043,-0.152,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,1,1,1,0,7,8,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,4,7,0,9,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,7,22,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4774706006074733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3316083255078935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4175788569880297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470978428794452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23714661269936496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5240302334530746,0.0,0.0,0.30948682809227696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brownboby12,2020/01/19,"Quetiapine I was perscribed Quetiapine and took 50mg for about 4 weeks and then I took 100mg about two times and then 150mg once, during the first two weeks I felt an improvement and I went about 3 full days with no anxiety and I could still feel myself being happy at the same time so I thought this was the drug for me however after about 4 weeks I started to feel sort of numb, I noticed that I could feel anxious a bit but then I couldn’t feel happy and my head became kind of stuffed so I decided to stop taking quetiapine, it has been about 3 days now and I can sort of feel my emotions coming back slowly, I can’t sleep without taking melatonin and I still like doing the same things that make me happy for example when I see something funny I laugh but I dont feel the happiness when I’m laughing... My left eye hurts and I feel like the left side of my brain is numb, it used to be the left side and back of my head but then now it’s only the left side, I’m getting kind of worried that I messed my brain up has anyone had anything similar to this and how long did it take to feel your emotions fully again?",2.480971659919032,3.959325324786324,3.685807467386418,90.57293522267209,75.66666666666666,6.635717498875394,22.99955015744489,7.273561745256523,0.6857811965811957,882,25,194,10,19,287,120,234,0.114,0.762,0.124,0.7425,1,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,17,14,0,0,10,0,17,9,6,3,0,39,41,23,0,3,4,0,9,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,10,13,0,1,11,0,0,4,5,4,0,3,10,11,29,10,24,26,4,39,0,1,2,0,1,10,0,2,27,127,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798575156828515,0.10039846104577503,0.0,0.06214037690156263,0.0,0.07313291627822369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667198297998928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702365767675454,0.0,0.0,0.1984179203530847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655413678969722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14191185566336414,0.0,0.0,0.1146283459253209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041556595988891,0.0,0.10306165995264624,0.0,0.0,0.199934884981048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35948508999155343,0.06348916115301219,0.08532969497092324,0.0,0.0,0.07559327119127852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04643121081545788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3784175460284757,0.0,0.0,0.1824137114849807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513779551922323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18509006963646868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862325871573132,0.0,0.0,0.08683535415088943,0.0,0.0,0.07864766799899238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059321803216678085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117974602374298,0.0,0.09464426883408958,0.0,0.06759008186296306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081834731154993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893476273221923,0.0,0.0,0.06841691543255209,0.0,0.0,0.06290305497255941,0.0,0.1419443223073349,0.07429978546272108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20045885153532605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590416654008426,0.0,0.0,0.07055331473985672,0.10364230145653744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19747697195215602,0.0,0.0,0.17362728937395475,0.0,0.0,0.07675564844000582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21385985957184112,0.0,0.0,0.08238391937072216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566806917443308,0.0,0.0,0.09025238935445827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zozozkittykat,2020/01/19,Extremely stressed out I need help please. It’s a really sensitive topic for me I’d rather feel comfortable talking about it on a direct message instead of having it on public if anyone is out there please message me. I’m mentally broken right now. Thank you 💔,3.446199999999997,6.053439219999998,4.829999999999998,78.245,76.8,8.0,28.0,8.841846274778883,2.7776,211,9,35,5,5,70,40,50,0.106,0.6559999999999999,0.239,0.7436,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,2,7,6,0,6,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,1,23,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20596995656146294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14894327179441344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19744383498995266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29685693549143793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21841967168787133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6466980619219862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887088681860754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515608816088853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33742855225499513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23676393599128234,0.0,0.2712001678309789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yaboisthrowaway1998,2020/01/19,"IDK if this is the place to post but idk where else to go, I need help, I've been having pedophile like thoughts that I don't want, and I'm scared. I don't really know what else to say it's been a couple months at least, I'm 21 and I don't know what else to do. I don't want these thoughts, idk if it's because I've always liked petite women and that's morphing into something else or what I just need help trying to figure out whatever the hell is going on in my head. I don't want to think things like I do, I don't get arroused by these thoughts but they just appear in my head. I'm scared of the future and what I might become if I keep having thoughts like this.

I'm heading to bed as it's already 2 a.m. so I'll read replies in the morning. Thanks in advance to anyone who can help me out.",1.0481355932203371,2.387546129943505,2.6786666666666683,96.87494915254236,79.22598870056497,5.397966101694917,20.274576271186444,5.6839178017228535,-0.2830569491525421,623,15,152,3,15,205,90,177,0.126,0.7190000000000001,0.155,0.8436,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,4,8,1,2,5,0,16,3,3,0,0,31,38,12,0,8,8,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,1,1,15,7,0,1,8,1,0,4,6,3,0,0,6,1,15,5,20,31,1,18,1,0,0,0,7,11,1,6,6,86,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365849714295809,0.0,0.10298783585733848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654393813409994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544998157223086,0.13669594095863874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369508541009833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4135809563867262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466552082022038,0.0,0.14068443623973173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810759223405372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24888436147090476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100138311189439,0.0,0.0,0.13604320222536154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24187408870699184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13130204377940755,0.0,0.0,0.09879326184718958,0.0,0.0,0.18355005622564952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12931491517495006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185389210686058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123805033670532,0.0,0.07929121744888196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984280959043805,0.24783380598628554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528537790976677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395220418817695,0.0,0.0,0.08222831100427813,0.07930780472963707,0.0,0.3930431072649833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403275063069691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219010982127945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dingadingus,2020/01/19,Trouble at work Im having trouble working. I just started working fulltime for the first time and Im a cashier at an auto parts store. Im constantly putting myself down for every interaction I have with people and its draining. I constantly feel like Im doing something wrong too and Im constantly fearing that Im going to get in trouble. Its draining and I feel like I cant work towards giving myself positive affirmations because thats even more draining. Having to recognise every put down that I give myself and try and tell myself something positive instead. That sounds too dificult. I want to quit.,3.8272713864306813,6.709985230088496,4.894889380530972,76.74080014749264,77.23008849557522,6.5985250737463135,33.31047197640118,7.793537801064563,2.998050737463128,493,27,75,8,12,161,64,113,0.145,0.7390000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.5324,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,6,5,7,0,1,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,11,13,6,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,7,0,0,2,0,1,3,1,5,0,1,0,3,11,2,12,13,2,15,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,8,51,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06508117920808396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461156744814458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051535362790266,0.0,0.17990333107686352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013703301437975,0.10796424121448048,0.15254171702954106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081177931778583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05577878564563858,0.20483185022292946,0.06067535614929857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.69192826678626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431712894364263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561293971169508,0.0,0.07401539068935623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21465077691823767,0.0,0.11355462444949285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643813457984435,0.0,0.0,0.07556675688935749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331477249566954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06225383330774816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248445114474948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297104686394965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31089629255481266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672758575401662,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notyouravgmillenial,2020/01/19,"Feeling so low and stuck in a rut I've been feeling really in a rut these days. On weekdays I can function like a normal adult. I go to work, hang out with colleagues/friends etc. But when it comes to the weekends, I just can't get myself out of bed. The moment I wake up I just think to myself 'Fuck it's another day what the hell am I going to do.'  I can't get outta the bed and the only activity that I do is binge on videos or go on my phone. I mean if I made plans with friends I'd go out but it just seems like whenever I don't have any plans with others and I'm just by myself I can't muster the motivation to do anything and I feel so useless and powerless.

I know it's up to me to just get up and do stuff but at the same time it just feels so hard. It's like I'm in the drivers seat but I have my hands tied up at the back.

It's been going like this some time now and it's so hard to muster the urge or motivation to do anything - activities that I used to enjoy like hiking, reading, writing. 

FYI I do go to therapy regularly and I have mentioned this to my therapist. Anyone share a similar experience or have any tips on what I can do? :(",0.6827846790890284,2.264910087301587,3.1989164941338863,91.64270186335405,81.06349206349206,6.446100759144239,21.67080745341615,7.423996415210882,0.5808590062111803,890,27,213,13,23,310,117,252,0.124,0.76,0.11599999999999999,-0.4321,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,5,13,12,2,0,14,0,21,3,2,4,0,45,45,21,0,2,14,0,7,5,1,0,0,0,2,1,17,15,0,0,10,3,0,8,4,4,0,0,4,7,26,8,33,41,3,34,1,2,0,1,6,17,2,6,14,143,43,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18320229787961326,0.1412455117642853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094185916762947,0.0,0.2216945280561739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357658461882033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603279405523473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17374171812796127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15022697534644205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176320910671566,0.0,0.0,0.2724350450682054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081389757341736,0.12452869982724782,0.21112679268079507,0.0,0.4593213419865124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413308804603953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740280255164051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3290399835799446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274571342038259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14672863743098574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319781639286431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244601242812428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473723113984393,0.0,0.08629276836352502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12262653037256263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420016530033076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15404208029991814,0.15639798670818622,0.0,0.08631082032970783,0.0,0.0,0.15709021516829938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633822444476705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806377153321327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GooberHasIt,2020/01/19,"Self Burnout I have had an issue with anxiety for a while and I have symptoms of depression. (Although, I have never been formally diagnosed with either) 

I am generally a pretty open person around people, at my work, at university, in day-to-day life, etc. The moment I walk through my door at the end of the week, I break. I become a dark shell of a person. I close my eyes and they open again on Monday morning. 

I have told my parents and friends about this and its always the same fucking thing. 

""You need to relax during that time (the weekend) off"" ""Find something you enjoy""

I used to be a gamer, especially when I was in high school. But now I look at my gaming rig and I just can't bring myself to turn it on. I forced myself today to play something, relaxing. I stopped after 10 mins because I wasn't enjoying it. 

It doesn't stop there, I tried all sorts of different things outside of gaming that I used to enjoy, a lot. Nothing. Its like all I want to do is lay in my bed. 

And so here I lay. That wouldn't be an issue either if I could just relax but I can't. My mind runs constantly. I stare at the ceiling, the wall, my phone, my gaming rig. And I feel like I'm my day is unfulfilled but I'm not strong enough or I don't care enough to do anything about it.

 I feel like I'm going insane.",0.9654904051172686,3.091609664179103,2.8928571428571463,91.37000000000002,82.95522388059702,5.619616204690832,20.39232409381664,6.868970318607317,0.3597085287846489,1002,29,216,12,28,335,147,268,0.131,0.795,0.07400000000000001,-0.9385,2,0,2,0,0,0,42.0,0,2,1,3,11,15,1,0,15,0,21,5,1,2,3,42,37,16,0,5,10,1,2,3,1,1,3,0,2,3,12,13,0,2,3,8,0,4,8,2,0,0,5,5,41,13,31,28,9,40,0,1,3,1,13,17,1,4,21,153,53,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105149230966623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667203082745232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399101832166832,0.11249530851028393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703344256845691,0.13956476459967845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288417397869968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365601251475037,0.0,0.10089545948234746,0.0,0.0,0.2444928842155037,0.0,0.1088415377897515,0.12826199663807145,0.0,0.13202883398769072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119255318795292,0.26114616288037457,0.1409349728442755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779204796599086,0.18055624899662773,0.0,0.0,0.11549908620874196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763246855394342,0.1168262150523406,0.0,0.0,0.07181848301032448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13351591330866036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637930588716967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925824655633552,0.185212706480622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611823383048756,0.0,0.0,0.10743450672697932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759678730102958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937011011802527,0.0974636556673827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121254578727329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14031795285945162,0.0,0.0,0.08760843637483141,0.22068128240547025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856282544559253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789229585280618,0.0,0.0,0.13183055212501602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194570244654036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21130048532333792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13134590143630073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16790805620502905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736868500407108,0.0,0.11978314970124505,0.12075110948342413,0.0,0.08579633731761896,0.1374533146327669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21828469174810944,0.0,0.0,0.07453578102142211,0.0,0.10136568550700087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199822432801164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,__scxtt16_,2020/01/19,"Ever had a friend who you once hung out with every day and was ur best mate but later on feel like they’ve changed and moved on and stop caring about you , you’ll all read this and wonder wtf is this guy talking about well Ik I ain’t smart in life and I sometimes don’t make sense but life is shit Not to sound like a suicidal person here but I feel like If i die I’ll free free cause I honestly hate my life I’m just too coward to fully commit I’ve tried a few times but never took enough pills to overdose I want to die painless and peacefully but I don’t know how",0.053329493087559854,2.149447443548389,1.5675115207373267,99.59983870967743,86.66129032258064,4.510599078341015,15.308755760368664,5.773587663045528,-0.9108599078341016,449,8,107,3,14,144,83,124,0.226,0.483,0.29100000000000004,0.7218,0,0,0,0,0,1,1.0,0,3,0,1,8,13,2,0,3,0,8,5,1,3,4,29,18,13,3,2,8,0,2,3,2,1,4,1,0,2,3,8,0,1,4,1,2,2,5,2,1,0,3,3,11,13,11,14,4,12,0,0,0,0,10,4,1,2,9,59,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16979511735452624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496199689446084,0.16620925396555986,0.17115891357578633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434515624453494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3358377977988798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16717871313012347,0.0,0.0,0.14635391512159274,0.13632026666665356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636180282457667,0.2311744581802302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500333355495094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16020366375598902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974023895706604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891895363086738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.342844297560097,0.23713633455883046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800021190892016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719637424820167,0.0,0.0,0.12478719466304672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17230765984491714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412741906583244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618399724226096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16608146198662285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600205671252765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352688579855097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769787691715126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300456472450525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434465839776804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976151820658556,0.10984899112308913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543158372208632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454742040216356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754610642054449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,that_one_guy2288,2020/01/19,"I feel helpless I have a mood disorder, ADHD/ADD, autism, social anxiety, depression as well as ptsd and struggled most of my life with it. I'm currently 17 almost 18 and I feel completely helpless, I have been seeing psychiatrists off and on since I was 5 or 6 and was misdiagnosed with bipolar at these young ages (it was a misdiagnosis) I have been off and on different meds since then. I'm currently trying new meds (Wellbutrin) for depression but it suppresses it or masks it a bit. I'm currently refusing to go to school because last time my social anxiety was so bad I threw up right at my teachers feet when I was presented with a social situation. My moods are everywhere and all my moods are intensified. I'm constantly zoning in and out of focus without any control. I feel like I'm on the edge and don't know how much longer I will be able to deal with this. I have become extremely suicidal in the past and am worried I will feel like that again. I want help but feel unable to achieve it and feel like my family wouldn't believe me if I told them how I really feel (I made an account to seek some sort of help and posted this on another thread I want help but am unsure what to do)",7.207927170868344,6.078572831932776,7.960966386554624,73.31172969187678,64.37815126050421,12.135014005602242,34.9593837535014,11.374738998889045,3.852519887955181,946,36,188,25,12,319,133,238,0.147,0.752,0.10099999999999999,-0.8892,4,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,2,6,13,0,1,7,0,21,3,1,4,1,45,41,24,1,4,7,0,7,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,11,16,0,3,8,0,1,2,3,6,1,0,10,8,25,4,29,27,5,30,0,4,1,0,10,13,0,7,17,121,36,2,0.10985442685157176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202367312508892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100033400527675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470477732788035,0.1151919449378002,0.16807667171332702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172385779858737,0.06696623897679206,0.12132558363357862,0.0,0.12376832039918115,0.0,0.0,0.11993258207481068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518027648593855,0.11871360892642953,0.1232110808255526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325509039227455,0.18923491375198045,0.0,0.0,0.11477449473700715,0.12590269051310854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356097684204366,0.0,0.3888198928065216,0.2354400734781457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06243280237600848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208993200600209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037312005616599,0.08954601995906815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759343046663382,0.16100797199473027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394691485587687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24404700664861564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075564374826144,0.0,0.0,0.10609808999951012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486848071732066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052101743554692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841394628774008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037555882448197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938150802968516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11117854482173337,0.08753975530011184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18174543419188813,0.12348097850122232,0.0,0.3359482616429741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484369889851018,0.0,0.12016291288064715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640569997230506,0.0,0.0,0.10497061256471557,0.0,0.07458394479825234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295899743742266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877232272585526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589574732055117,0.0,0.0,0.11156250292854768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,buanony,2020/01/19,"Anyone else have trouble working? I’m a 28 year old woman, diagnosed with bipolar and anxiety disorders at 17. Due to my mental health issues, I didn’t get my first job until I was 24. I’m at a point in my life where I’m able to work part time, but start to get overwhelmed around the 20 hour mark.

On the outside, I’m “normal”. When opportunities for promotion present themselves, coworkers ask me why I don’t go for them. After all, I’m almost 30, I’m not in school, I don’t have another job, I don’t have any kids, and I look healthy enough. Each time, I awkwardly try to explain that I have anxiety, but I don’t think people understand the extent of it.

I really do want to get a full time job someday (preferably at my current workplace), but I don’t think I’m ready yet. Maybe I am ready, but too afraid to take the next step, because I like working here, and don’t want to leave my company if I’m not able to handle it. Or maybe I’m not ready, and never will be. Are there people who try to work full time, but despite their best efforts, can’t do it?

In the meantime, I am working on other things to improve myself, such as losing weight and taking better care of myself, physically and mentally. I’m not sure what I’m looking for by posting here. It’s been nice to get this stuff off my chest, but if you have any advice, or if you’re in a similar situation, I’d love to hear it. Cheers!",4.705066937119675,4.443246772413797,5.955354969574039,82.74925963488845,69.20689655172413,9.030425963488844,29.817444219066928,8.671277953709913,2.061062880324544,1084,37,234,16,17,366,159,290,0.067,0.7609999999999999,0.172,0.9876,4,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,0,1,2,12,9,14,0,3,9,0,22,7,1,0,3,36,53,20,0,7,15,0,1,1,0,1,4,1,0,2,12,9,1,0,5,0,0,2,13,5,0,1,3,4,26,9,33,48,8,36,0,2,2,1,10,15,0,6,19,140,38,10,0.20040614231403728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979172814278742,0.0,0.0,0.1003389014601142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362830489929906,0.10507165697485607,0.15331015033450518,0.0,0.0,0.07006431719043861,0.10266988785147092,0.0,0.08920197761450442,0.0936763451114974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06108286212603733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10515694114107643,0.08862147352217753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216370922919732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170400796629643,0.0,0.0,0.11484140073290648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370680817443339,0.0,0.0,0.1035365584745224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523268113739743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20940787580118836,0.0,0.056947714519214675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651117893305864,0.11293614373134765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867984071806124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458597271273594,0.29830825960744994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610058417398048,0.0,0.0,0.07077639251507364,0.04895415911469144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682906859670962,0.11210160567174968,0.0,0.0,0.09043718390830542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20133490637078266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20196225542483012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728278579968398,0.0,0.10656710295454667,0.0,0.0981777346074093,0.0,0.0,0.10514626720842328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085101613450505,0.0,0.13893638559398305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472429073826164,0.0,0.09596684348121544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419265322946449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141085759755653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126324503245928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092424950731464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470854310005227,0.0,0.0,0.09444020871085312,0.0,0.15068047816801425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06657046800101331,0.1284121639494756,0.0,0.0,0.23371686641364064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606261562655456,0.0,0.0,0.10431493092556098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820473508092462,0.0,0.0,0.12202034580470893,0.0,0.0,0.09041768612850272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647451460756361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452749253838375
mentalhealth,fearsome_marshmello,2020/01/19,"Lonely and numb What are you supposed to do when you just don’t feel like anything but you still feel horrible? My girlfriend just ended our conversation to go to sleep (it’s late) and I’m talking to another friend but I still feel alone. I’ve barely moved all day and I’ve had hardly any food, water or sleep in the past 2 days. I know that’s probably part of it. What are you supposed to do though? I don’t want to just sit here with bad thoughts",0.5803868471953564,2.880123382978727,1.927833655705996,96.46136363636364,86.44680851063829,5.120309477756287,19.18375241779497,6.574015621080383,-0.025987234042553098,354,10,80,4,11,113,62,94,0.161,0.763,0.076,-0.8523,0,3,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,4,0,0,8,5,0,0,1,0,7,5,2,0,1,17,15,8,0,1,6,0,4,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,5,4,2,0,5,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,2,4,9,2,9,13,2,12,0,1,0,0,9,1,0,1,9,47,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964718360381449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12900240434539753,0.19891683490304707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15610681460042505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15839145252946366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446814219364819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680177628429951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877538348195807,0.13552161206787458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293858138535835,0.0,0.1465616349710899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781079744307516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699338064124092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104254077498898,0.0,0.21398969563455614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267776550592377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20162092111593627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205426453441594,0.18108997357970136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20452852506407554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796737016353684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.302989093470789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247355521706898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18637914128718647,0.15060049269250558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118898875768058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ValkaMoon,2020/01/19,It's a year tomorrow since my last attempt...  Tomorrow marks a year since my last suicide attempt and I'm really trying my best but I'm struggling. Everything just keeps going wrong and nothing ever gets better. I don't know if I can keep this up.,1.5894557823129247,4.215664714285714,3.4888775510204084,84.5948129251701,85.53061224489795,6.531972789115647,24.493197278911573,7.793537801064563,1.7851605442176868,197,8,36,4,6,66,36,49,0.261,0.6859999999999999,0.052000000000000005,-0.8996,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,4,2,4,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,9,9,4,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,2,1,9,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,7,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352615405106264,0.19826769547412254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027823182887864,0.0,0.0,0.20147721106752525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171240312847055,0.0,0.12740582695702274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3985203624524549,0.0,0.0,0.12320265940340465,0.3654708515208103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151053493132112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361450917412694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37088559951905625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343600779097923,0.0,0.2452149303329464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15220250898732435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245104034578612,0.0,0.2887272515753725
mentalhealth,DisturbedOranges,2020/01/19,"Could my boyfriend have schizophrenia? For a couple of days now, I (17F) have been in a relationship with this guy (20M), who I don't know very long myself. Amongst a few other things that raise concern (we will get there), yesterday he said something that made me worry. He asked if I sometimes see the sky as red or blue (he meant the night sky, and not just that colour in a certain place, like, the whole damn sky).
I also recall that another symptom of schizophrenia is incoherent speech. I'm not sure about this one as much. I speak rather eloquently so I'm not sure if I'm exaggerating or anything, but sometimes, he really doesn't make sense.
Another major concern of mine: he likes to fight people. He mentions very often how much he does. He even said to me that he often hopes for people to provoke him just so he can get into a fight. Something that relates to this is also the amount of injuries he has had. Yesterday he also told me about one time he 'accidentally' stabbed himself with a hunting knife, and having to go to hospital. When I asked what happened, he didn't explain , simply went ""nothing "".

Any advice on the situation would be dearly appreciated. My mental health is fairly poor ( has been for quite some time) and I don't thing that I am ready to deal with his problems. I probably should've waited a bit longer before getting onto a relationship. Thank you to anyone who reads/comments.",5.5925787728026535,6.6528638134328375,5.8472636815920405,79.65934494195692,67.5820895522388,8.19436152570481,29.81426202321725,8.344100000000001,2.1197580431177454,1114,40,206,15,18,355,162,268,0.10800000000000001,0.8009999999999999,0.091,-0.3944,1,0,2,0,2,0,42.0,1,1,0,1,17,12,3,0,13,0,21,2,0,4,3,37,44,17,0,7,11,0,0,2,0,2,2,4,0,1,16,8,0,1,3,0,1,2,7,4,0,2,10,8,21,8,27,30,8,20,0,0,4,0,35,9,1,8,11,131,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030832208198056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708183690963975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676456210493625,0.2367361105262546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893067653016783,0.0,0.09289339470226422,0.0,0.2110614244459658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605543307792834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232394028119432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012818503583288,0.12490330112809743,0.0,0.07280043463328402,0.11637779712480685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878499724027796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455840083820016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17693070421432108,0.0,0.06415422020928335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117722831709434,0.09982239072779577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11998974297232352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211865637706146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06203774764871287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102982246265401,0.0,0.0,0.09989822965693013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10681297350032393,0.0753505256059067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375988586966353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16596453002273925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593339522135983,0.0,0.10831463738852096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529853850546836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15651822995408965,0.0,0.1179390949876171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12170736463542815,0.1080141392517636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006535840992262,0.0,0.0,0.07231597696008855,0.0,0.0,0.24238898655603586,0.0,0.0,0.21475586859815407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995343032604723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12688563679578446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.173806265441651,0.22328907744761511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21278247941635928,0.11732904304202445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039278401537484,0.0,0.0,0.1499893893768488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316464009233002,0.0,0.0,0.10786489694026573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862812036604439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464401433288344,0.0,0.12603025060023712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463854108088573,0.0,0.08018910681591274,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,potatopig0,2020/01/19,"I Held my dog while she was put to sleep and i cant cope My dog Mona died today.My family decided to have a vet come to the house to put her to sleep.Mona has been wearing a diaper for a year and half due to not being able to control her poop and being very old.Me and my family wiped,changed,and clean her everyday.We didn’t mind because we love her so much.She was happy running and doing her normal stuff but just pooping in her diaper.But this month Monas back legs are giving out. Her legs shake and look weak and also left her left leg up. But she can still walk but not very far.Her paws would slide and ground down her back paw nails.Mona would not get up on her own will,she was in pain,she didn’t look happy.But she was eating,drinking and had a little excitement here and there.But she is a lab and they are very good at hiding pain and suffering.I was with her on the couch the night before kissing,hugging,and feeding her pizza.Today i did the same but on her bed until the vet came. It was a very peaceful death she first sedated Mona.Mona was on her bed and snoring from the sedatives.the vet then found a hard mass behind her knee and thought thats why she couldn’t put weight on her left leg.We didn’t notice because it was deep inside and mona would not let us touch that leg.then came the death shot i was crying petting and kissing her until her final breath she didn’t move or make any sounds it was very peaceful.I saw her lifeless body and it look like she was asleep.finally i gave her one last kiss and carried her to her coffin.We put her blanket,and stuffed puppy in there with her.Then we put her in her favorite spot in the backyard.I miss her so much i cant go to sleep and i keep replaying her death in my head.I am only 17 and this is the most traumatic thing i have gone through.So anyone who has lost a pet how did you cope.",3.003135995777619,4.074781971938776,3.679173117522872,92.76040816326531,73.66836734693877,6.631386347642508,22.19071076706545,6.8039241337230125,0.3245470443349756,1471,34,333,12,29,465,193,392,0.122,0.782,0.096,-0.9065,0,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,3,1,1,3,10,12,0,1,17,0,39,18,11,3,0,54,59,33,4,5,10,0,3,1,0,3,2,1,6,0,11,28,2,3,3,0,0,15,11,5,0,3,28,8,52,7,32,24,4,52,0,2,4,3,44,23,0,2,15,199,63,0,0.08555238397986413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841621055947232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817855482255992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059820216070728086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13156900489401827,0.0,0.1043038784112119,0.0,0.07279877753604272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950294121972386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19569827171563828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369580347287212,0.0,0.0,0.09595427330028376,0.0,0.0,0.09397527657141552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878986759160402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380876616752089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130234729805193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371845488244923,0.0,0.0727708141088168,0.0,0.09380377322253426,0.0,0.0,0.04469758958504759,0.08206964233118187,0.04862139137121927,0.07175728067694467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107210358668127,0.07663813184520199,0.0,0.08780142782671632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987159646298157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604288977590166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06973661146817194,0.0,0.0,0.2788587465510585,0.08748310897076449,0.0,0.041796573394727636,0.08574596416552854,0.0,0.0,0.21552736687377375,0.0,0.0933905332886947,0.0,0.0772143667299063,0.0,0.05710688063170824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863835195764538,0.0,0.06828709667537433,0.09092864487325368,0.12578169201733042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028511688767236,0.08382317180922003,0.0,0.09740195619845836,0.0897728355268514,0.0,0.05797250949785601,0.06506644315475621,0.18206753689227548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4300188781338766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25684250666525205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832224435883909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793701142840748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05683720243681401,0.0,0.0,0.06791903658598797,0.0,0.0,0.1621873132704385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290898414057158,0.0,0.0,0.3529483827692769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417975574104006,0.0,0.0,0.07719771971973811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18232187688445228,0.0,0.0,0.05509293033794349
mentalhealth,paniqueen,2020/01/19,"I finally got a job but now I'm scared Mostly a self depreciation vent. I'm in college and I'm fortunate enough to not need a job, so I've gotten one just so my resume isn't completely empty when I enter my job field. I'm just pissed at myself because this is something that I have wanted for a long time but now I'm freaked out because I've been absolutely miserable at my previous jobs and I'm just not ready to be so miserable again",2.057661290322581,3.719300935483872,4.550201612903226,83.14530241935486,77.27956989247312,8.090860215053763,25.603494623655912,8.841846274778883,1.9442913978494625,349,13,74,8,8,123,57,93,0.247,0.6920000000000001,0.061,-0.9663,4,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,10,5,1,3,4,0,5,1,1,0,0,13,15,8,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,3,0,7,0,7,11,2,12,0,2,0,0,1,4,1,1,7,44,9,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372270835525445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20401236123626665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010521032666928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21315176449300965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556225875137356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7723584648046525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17219627655769584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14427785009672647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185175435355867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19480750616078416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20298831495131048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14979640707464034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346056951691595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476772530521255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,El_Presidente_Ken,2020/01/19,"Spit it out! Not sure if this is the right sub to ask this, but why do I have trouble getting to the point?

When answering or asking a question, explaining something, or talking about my day I have a tendency to ""tell a story"" (i.e., give too much background information, elaborate too much, provide unnecessary details, etc.). 

This happens on reddit and other forums, and in everyday life. My wife is often annoyed by this, I'm annoyed by this, and I'm sure many other people are too (on and offline).

I can't help it, it just happens all the time and I'm sick of it. I do have depression and anxiety issues so maybe that is part of it(?) Can anyone help or give insight, or offer advice, or anything for that matter?",4.412391304347828,5.702417050724637,5.69634782608696,78.80191304347828,70.52173913043478,8.128695652173914,31.19130434782609,8.548686976883017,2.5567078260869573,555,24,101,9,10,186,88,138,0.217,0.7759999999999999,0.008,-0.9852,0,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,2,0,6,0,11,3,1,0,3,26,22,15,0,1,9,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,14,7,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,6,2,13,22,5,10,0,1,0,0,13,6,0,8,4,76,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634145324353652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302213094141675,0.0,0.0,0.11902495833239025,0.0,0.1400802947579622,0.0,0.31827393802527937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978074786290072,0.0,0.14661414939064396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898453621894948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893529792049472,0.3265897852081829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010580022704945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22819584588933625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17767019709120455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12023462880721753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725809687295919,0.171013433103922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25026925067671485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18433659172943587,0.0,0.11801226479684768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160917214500813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906904457951272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537082956864147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104716956400375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208692343681473,0.0,0.0,0.13682003961371775,0.14878375346872516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925929989030356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15360117325777375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SuccessfulSpirit1,2020/01/19,"I give in My whole life I've tried to avoid having to take pharmaceuticals for my mental illness.  I've just been smoking weed everyday since high school, it's gotten to the point where it's like a part of my check list and that's it.  It isn't helping as much anymore.

I've never felt as terrible as I do today and these past few, I think I have a serious issue.  Going to see a therapist as soon as I get back to my home state.  I think it could be a lot of things, MPD, OCD, OCPD, PTSD, obviously unmanageable anxiety.  A combination of multiple things likely.  It's crazy how our trauma affects us, huh?

If it weren't for the pain I'd leave behind I'd 100% shoot my brains out.  But my mom loves me a lot for whatever reason.  I give up, I'll take whatever pharmaceuticals they'll give me.  This isn't how life's supposed to be.

Happy Saturday I suppose 😂",2.218983050847456,3.849204005649721,4.412000000000003,84.4478305084746,76.74011299435028,7.8838418079096035,23.664406779661018,8.648137234880735,1.5069430508474584,667,21,144,14,15,231,110,177,0.111,0.7979999999999999,0.091,0.1451,0,1,0,1,0,0,22.0,2,0,1,0,6,9,0,1,8,1,11,6,1,4,2,19,24,11,0,2,3,1,1,2,0,1,4,0,1,0,12,3,0,1,4,0,1,1,4,5,0,0,4,2,19,4,21,16,6,15,0,0,1,1,9,6,0,3,9,87,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831194778733567,0.0,0.14041402908047435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886993482488627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805540818188474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130439036595468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594356542660252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397218925344154,0.4074629865397905,0.08046587741457628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071960131999246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490127482377957,0.14959206408808995,0.14202105042591878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14777769627168671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991780920159353,0.0,0.0,0.20001099506960116,0.13834231626371316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24074058615651425,0.12778576656715224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268412898205485,0.0,0.0,0.16582235040749085,0.0,0.0,0.1040810837105698,0.0,0.10919888920768027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506561586534489,0.0,0.0,0.15332248914187213,0.13515866648483882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338433549278942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550499844745067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14557270601938496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14329132792851132,0.11282471634795045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712036999610324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21290822621066224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16439080977931544,0.18812523602832654,0.18144358434986174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420578987733028,0.0,0.0,0.09612675277792633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17030902385108268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807431938607758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cupcake-91,2020/01/19,Honestly just struggling today. Idk but sometimes the only thing that stops me making a full suicide plan is the fact I have 2 kids and honestly couldn't break their hearts like that. I know it would fuck them up for life. Sometimes though I wonder if I'm fucking them up worse than that would anyway tmby being around but I really do want them to have happy lives regardless of the mess I am. Not sure what's to gain from this post tbh.i guess I just needed to vent a bit. Sorry.,4.169017857142858,5.438697270833337,4.508571428571429,87.16500000000002,71.08333333333334,7.152380952380952,22.047619047619047,7.447530270364453,0.7163619047619045,382,8,76,4,7,120,74,96,0.23600000000000002,0.5870000000000001,0.177,-0.7115,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,4,2,5,9,2,1,5,0,9,4,1,1,2,21,18,5,1,7,6,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,7,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,11,5,10,14,2,8,0,0,0,2,5,4,2,3,3,52,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630650202087998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999801913880623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33868557490441475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20178845195140324,0.0,0.0,0.1949937136247192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21706383580816574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066845801748406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293822646584442,0.0894902911215721,0.0,0.1617473122611724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227106094350534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358223037020954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13931321319510045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17543148358511945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173469083987781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3623304837899665,0.20504996255880167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314291042736894,0.0,0.19149479222511204,0.0,0.20036425381577705,0.0,0.1726407301025407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169365523269965,0.0,0.17996898740197656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736289449343714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080416490206414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19864600351681636,0.0,0.0,0.1866714718841524,0.2602452229138832,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eva-unit-two,2020/01/19,"Is there somewhere I can just walk into, talk to a doctor, and get prescribed something? I won't burden you with the details, but I've been going through a sort of dissociative mild panic attack for the last few days, mostly over a new job I started and I have to go back to Monday (fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck). I need help. Is there somewhere I can go and get prescribed some kind of anxiety/depression medication without having to schedule an appointment?",3.7708139534883713,6.196961372093022,4.518779069767444,81.8121220930233,74.81395348837209,6.625581395348838,28.19186046511628,7.645422480735847,1.914144186046512,362,15,63,5,8,116,60,86,0.243,0.7020000000000001,0.055,-0.9681,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,4,9,6,1,6,0,8,7,0,0,0,12,20,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,8,0,0,1,0,7,1,12,18,3,13,0,0,0,5,3,2,5,3,7,44,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817447630862778,0.0,0.12284199589653405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302897852770923,0.0,0.13759704086085714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351636062905345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7384561911109734,0.16693114372383658,0.0,0.27237792506456715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708063737917976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585325250002089,0.0,0.0,0.16636060353423926,0.0,0.13022192493911375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093669865004456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184565608831424,0.0,0.1542927035552784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18743847111094772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298746621755853,0.0,0.0,0.11307565241004752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284052914371318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15399844756083644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonok123,2020/01/19,Whenever I talk to people I am putting on a show. I’m not being me. I feel like I have no real identity. I don’t know who I am. Is there any diagnosis for this? Is there any medication I can take? I feel so lost. This has gone on for years. I think it has to do with childhood trauma of friends rejecting me,-1.1876285240464348,0.8481432388059709,2.1073631840796025,93.21321724709786,94.22388059701493,5.96285240464345,19.38474295190713,7.3871296695380915,0.580457379767827,235,8,57,5,9,84,46,67,0.172,0.743,0.085,-0.6957,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,0,11,1,0,0,0,7,19,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,1,0,2,3,3,0,0,2,2,11,2,8,16,0,6,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,40,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4001887447530022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29755477953725235,0.2102062519514621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273303239022953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16170748375340147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375157902106167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211994557324732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29641744792101593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039900712605677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29579406980002776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3349113491146645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22123305819178288,0.2365002457898893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18853813105032768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18948193800919924
mentalhealth,LilacKi,2020/01/19,"Decisions I have bad anxiety over making decisions that would involve other people. It gets worse when it involves people that I care about and people that I don’t want to lose in my life. I heard, read and know that if people leave you because of something (that isn’t necessarily bad or a deal breaker) then they weren’t  worth keeping in the first place but I still can’t wrap my head around that fact completely. Because if you make a decision, you made it. You chose what to do. You chose when to do it. You chose how to do it. Some factors may have been affected and it wasn’t all you but the thing is you still chose to do it. So if I chose to do something and picked the wrong timing and I lost that person (because they chose to leave me) then it’s my fault. It’s my fault that I couldn’t wait. It’s my fault that I couldn’t be patient enough to wait for the best time because my anxiety told me I needed answers. It makes me puke. It debilitates me. It makes me incapable of doing anything productive for the rest of the day because I’ve decided to either sleep it off or just stare off somewhere and let my anxiety sit on my chest because I’m too afraid it’ll follow me into my dreams and then there’s the possibility that I wouldn’t have control in that dream and I’m forced to have a sort of first hand experience with the consequences of my actions. It’s reached a point where it physically hurts me, and I’m hoping that it’s all just in my head and that it hasn’t really given me a physical sickness. My heart hurts too much to the point that I can’t breathe and I want to scratch it and stab it to make it go away. It makes me feel like I want to die, that I’d rather die because then I wouldn’t have to deal with this.",3.648149171270717,4.4245930193370215,4.49753149171271,88.60796574585636,71.84530386740332,7.891447513812156,26.08220994475139,8.109356740369918,1.293293569060774,1371,42,307,19,25,443,156,362,0.18600000000000005,0.732,0.08199999999999999,-0.9913,1,0,2,0,0,1,25.0,0,8,2,6,15,15,0,1,14,0,29,9,7,11,3,64,57,27,2,14,11,0,3,1,0,5,2,1,0,1,42,16,0,4,7,3,1,3,11,11,0,2,8,5,46,4,36,40,8,32,0,4,1,0,17,15,0,9,14,212,88,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21154403936535685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585330829467964,0.0820565223406187,0.0,0.0,0.08660274497346837,0.0,0.15392685720622995,0.3933290676171487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673342588102893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397996449131388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664518260099936,0.0,0.10338365011917423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059446140707037465,0.19005960439399225,0.0,0.0,0.19132906309428646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952428427119757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016618867323192,0.0,0.0,0.046607148234613434,0.06585082558432064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568103665621974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048158355056995054,0.0,0.052385961989404234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891991212521501,0.0,0.0,0.10922945625938696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155194548560512,0.0,0.0,0.1973534463343873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819306034035641,0.0,0.0,0.05065772882332455,0.0,0.0,0.19520295824045208,0.0,0.0942565955438731,0.06510690445339634,0.04503272414453406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10312179344247444,0.10062140940556688,0.0,0.0,0.08721952120234049,0.3691707037257201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776024658236332,0.06834761915102527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556139882388374,0.08048486118959107,0.09630470025091216,0.0,0.1742729497041905,0.1039150207373479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220132605016247,0.0,0.05905055050002219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224295049273076,0.0,0.0,0.14192376409914031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14722435516855836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123789226240619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749757899499704,0.0,0.0,0.08807848295358284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631040546015482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393560791520088,0.06547945696976629,0.10078040342076387,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ciaranl18,2020/01/19,"(21M) Struggling With life Hi reddit i am a 21 year old male and over the past 5 Years I have stuggled With life to the point Where i just dont know what to do any more

It all started When i was around 15-16 When i stopped going out and Communicating with my Friends Due to my low confidence, Then as the years progressed it developed into depression and Lonliness

I hardly Have any friends now because they are too busy with thier own lives and ive also never had a Girlfriend So im not Experienced With women Which makes it hard for me To develop a Relationship. Im also an Introvert as well, Would say im shy but i struggle With making connections

Im currently at School Studying Engineering hoping to progress onto uni and Get a Degree in mechanical Engineering But over the past few years i just cant seem to stick at a Job long enough Cause i Either get Bored and leave or i End up getting laid off

Over the past year ive been really Trying to put myself out there and i would Try to start Conversations With random people but i just cant seem to make a Connection with people. I find it pretty hard to communicate with random people

I see Groups of Friends and Couples With each other happy all the time But i just Wish i had what they had. I wish i could feel what it feels like to wanted Or ""Loved""

This really Hurt but the other day i was sitting at a bar on my Own and as i was sitting there this old guy came up to me and starting speaking to me, He then Told me that he was a psychologist For over 20 years and then Told me That I was a ""Ticking Time bomb"" and to get help

I wasnt even Doing anything apart From just Drinking a beer by myself But he then said that he knew by my body language and Communication skills that i was Struggling with life

This ex-psychologist Also Told me that he had a brother once Who Had the same Traits as me and he said that One day his brother ended up unfortiantly taking his own life

Dont get me wrong, This guy (Cant remember his name) was a Good person and so was his wife that he introduced me to But What he said Shook me.

I also Got Bullied When i was in School but it pisses me Off seeing the people Who use to bully me With better lives than myself. 

I was So close to beating the shit out of this guy Who use to bully me in school the other day cause it pissed me off seeing him With a Girlfriend, I felt like he doesnt Deserve a woman or to Experience love

I dont Know, I plan on just working hard in School so that i can hopefully land a High paying Job cause at least money will give me some Power

At least with money i could Buy what i want, It would make me feel a bit more happy and i could also Buy myself Woman if i wanted to so that i dont spend the rest of my life alone

People say money doesnt bring happiness but i know for a fact that my life Would be better with an Extra few Hundred Thousand in the bank

I think having more money would solve Alot of my problems Because i just dont have that much to offer. Well according to IQ tests i did once im classed as ""Intelligant"" (apparently my IQ is Around 137) But  apart From that i dont have much To offer

im not that Funny, I Find it hard To Make connections, I cant Flirt with women, Im Quiet, Im pretty good looking and Tall but im not a model But i just dont think i have much to offer


*Thank you If You read This all, Feel Free to give me Advice Folks*",2.3299713453132576,3.802662998591551,3.9590675084992704,88.48126760563379,76.05633802816901,6.6993686255463825,21.67799902865469,7.372421405659032,0.5965332685769789,2659,67,580,32,58,889,278,710,0.10400000000000001,0.7609999999999999,0.135,0.9839,6,1,2,0,0,0,34.0,0,2,2,9,31,34,3,4,34,0,55,15,4,10,5,125,110,56,0,18,29,3,10,2,5,6,6,7,0,9,40,42,3,1,16,4,10,5,18,13,2,2,28,22,84,22,88,72,25,79,0,3,4,2,60,38,3,13,36,395,124,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0437105797963061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04632778799171715,0.0,0.17885667659018356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060837178085667534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036809771602412666,0.07964008198857438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05453516029473539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912180431420028,0.04883462688025537,0.04968601653007962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051160305733500916,0.0,0.13785306355288282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714210359333973,0.04949396027186607,0.0,0.08654331279408743,0.0,0.03852671328309622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669704922532607,0.04381931493506621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923671354424203,0.046219042594326,0.0,0.02954437949750572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04375546546273066,0.0,0.0,0.09046927656159956,0.03195580923342762,0.04294873967330756,0.0,0.08176658046525334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367709422751828,0.0,0.11685041102684646,0.08582003216059704,0.02542163735972336,0.07503641980796844,0.03577543773016648,0.0,0.0,0.1328720592520989,0.0,0.14285082711587452,0.2003507860172672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029982221918934036,0.04726071879570448,0.0,0.08885587929770054,0.0,0.0,0.04788542153162316,0.0,0.4348540476771201,0.0,0.08877715826613862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374890310542953,0.0,0.0,0.047363631662788806,0.0,0.0,0.18956881406089326,0.043706578596546745,0.0,0.07899652048867903,0.03958549506068741,0.03756274352530067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074288187196081,0.0,0.14929132725556254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864721486095963,0.0,0.034499276596707866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387524318642207,0.09527403244816424,0.0303108584868672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810229810949464,0.1550540895477554,0.03905735193950051,0.0,0.0,0.04228521879473481,0.0,0.0,0.09101494182074067,0.0,0.04280149098256288,0.0,0.04496697305221666,0.0,0.0,0.04474306829388629,0.0,0.05731160118839568,0.0,0.0,0.04802431466018155,0.050671461819880685,0.0,0.12764816861380862,0.0711437150254597,0.0,0.18108049237437104,0.10693435962055436,0.08144277831280727,0.0,0.0,0.04591569119037869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498241849778563,0.0,0.0,0.03739708837244051,0.0,0.14028754542511568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03363211768476248,0.0,0.0,0.04118226135941059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05732359045593403,0.0,0.0,0.05216596902070385,0.0,0.0,0.12822705746780674,0.0,0.060738775943442326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726638105126364,0.0,0.0,0.07915044356386422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043701624641977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028768008770665,0.0,0.0,0.032564674142016865,0.0,0.0,0.15887796523939904,0.04890628655912595,0.0,0.17283164343561802
mentalhealth,CantThink1998,2020/01/19,Welp.. I just become more schizophrenic by the day...enjoying the decline has new meaning,4.614000000000001,8.085520066666668,4.641666666666668,75.14250000000001,81.66666666666666,8.333333333333334,34.16666666666667,8.841846274778883,4.2376666666666685,71,4,10,2,2,22,14,15,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5699404672468338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3328117691883176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5621334696141536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4984076167393074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HiddenIdentity2886,2020/01/19,"Everything in my life is going perfect but I feel empty Everything in my life is going perfect but I feel empty, like a husk, I dont care about anything or anyone as long as it doesnt affect me even then I still dont care that much. I'm only 14 years old and I all I want to do is walk the streets for the rest of my life",2.0001369863013707,2.309146000000002,4.1670136986301385,91.19134246575344,75.30136986301369,6.935890410958903,22.819178082191787,6.742157984588678,0.4298186301369871,250,6,61,2,5,87,47,73,0.146,0.698,0.156,0.2062,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,3,0,7,3,0,1,3,11,15,7,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,10,5,8,15,3,11,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,6,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373074994260583,0.0,0.16159698992179194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4004276073432233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4602918065093216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12970150555324558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3529720347287567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985826335825238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22320486639180367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4161089352327897,0.0959371823502328,0.0,0.0,0.17378257369985334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14435562706809887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060588271363752,0.0,0.0,0.14934935366271745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15682251159033853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582498228139675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264567899890732
mentalhealth,Yodawg658,2020/01/19,"I hate when people tell me that only I can fix myself/solve my problems. Only other people can help me. I'm 23 years old, and I genuinely think it's impossible to help myself. Anytime something makes me really really upset, which can be even the littlest problems, I get super depressed and am basically crippled in my bed. Then I spend hours venting to people all over the internet, or people I know in real life about my issues. 

Only other people can help me. The only reason I haven't comitted suicide years ago is because of other people. But if it were all up to me and there was no one around for me to cry to, I would have swallowed a bunch of sleeping pills and sleep forever. I hate my life, I hate that I was born, I hate the 10 therapists that couldn't help me, i hate the group therapy programs I've been in, I hate the institution I've been sent too, and I hate that I can't do anything right in life... I even hate the people I talk to because they can't always help me. I hate myself, and I hate my life. Secretly, I'm hoping everyone will just give up on me so finally I can have a good reason to commit suicide.",4.29849275362319,4.817541139130434,5.883913043478263,80.18818840579713,70.21739130434783,8.394202898550725,27.507246376811594,8.447377352677275,1.887559420289856,882,28,174,13,15,302,116,230,0.21100000000000002,0.662,0.127,-0.9741,1,0,1,0,0,5,27.0,0,0,1,1,9,17,10,1,9,0,22,8,2,3,3,26,41,12,2,6,4,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,0,10,7,1,0,5,0,1,1,5,14,0,1,6,0,38,3,20,31,3,20,0,1,0,0,12,10,0,3,9,121,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354981983564288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05965272443611221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0589956531564389,0.06382026361228951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740443804786142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874928875352348,0.0,0.0,0.06174742507661024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947025688930278,0.0,0.0,0.06850390243610976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853407762480491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037455632132611855,0.06877261975308158,0.0,0.06013107938982287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7078010259997031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240265110076488,0.0,0.0,0.07120542192679552,0.0706012760732939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482686513431296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03939954454911247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20255012943140874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0478543548553629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522773228290704,0.0,0.048579733487069864,0.2180971977779597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3479109933294484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719736943003585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160014807706154,0.09185428755361058,0.14742074772262487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061223793504388585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14348571567253332,0.0,0.0,0.055191298505542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683681859700907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05762257722149975,0.06266116679808817,0.0,0.08198500180002254,0.08323887340930282,0.0,0.04593675147930521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050927288724877534,0.0,0.0,0.09233341444147697
mentalhealth,burnt_crack,2020/01/19,"My mom is threatening to leave the family and take me with, leaving my dad with my brother and sister. I don’t know how to deal with myself My parents relationship haven’t been the best, even when I was little. I think there was a time where they were on good terms, but because my sister often leaves her diabetes to my parents, and she has decided to drop out of high school, they’ve gone back to constantly fighting over what to do with her.
It’s only now because my brother is in college and my sister is a senior in high school, it leaves me being the youngest as a sophomore. When they start fighting I can’t help but cry in my room as my mom come in and asks me if she leaves, would I go with her. 
I feel so many emotions in my head, but I don’t know how I can express it. I’ve only found it in music, But only now I don’t feel the same kind of release when I play, becoming unmotivated and more of homework to me. The only way I can find some release is by crying, becoming more controlling, or throwing things away in my room. Which all of them have been losing the effect they’ve used to have.",6.782057416267942,5.053280140350879,7.1918819776714535,80.41787081339716,65.57894736842105,10.045295055821374,32.569377990430624,8.575989854853784,2.321915789473684,864,27,185,10,11,284,117,228,0.11800000000000001,0.833,0.049,-0.9437,2,0,0,0,4,0,21.0,0,0,3,4,13,7,2,0,9,0,22,2,1,5,1,37,35,20,0,2,6,10,2,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,7,13,0,1,9,1,0,4,5,3,0,0,7,2,36,4,31,26,7,34,0,1,0,0,25,17,0,4,11,136,43,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963295742026143,0.0,0.09681056086002077,0.07923229097875023,0.0,0.12562586835928946,0.22760172933480824,0.0,0.0,0.10813533931658477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876083465674776,0.0,0.1113508869194241,0.11556942167202268,0.0,0.0,0.22637174961117135,0.0,0.10623091048588014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590743500034488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680577137657894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713803434911993,0.0,0.1042014121391041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417775264803598,0.0,0.0,0.11297931242786866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856066528768415,0.08642603547878654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574995658772224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906631691464228,0.2177372838332968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073015107775308,0.11325745253879288,0.0,0.0,0.5455285474664481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327431127854532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152767000990054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446756235426254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24136112030193485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31346977876089965,0.0,0.0,0.22883002611108094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062764277099728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085663081809452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293306274436465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747412799514543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845596750571031,0.06602461411664888,0.0,0.0,0.060084128492626364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899447771020659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178927590385264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731974830127465,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatuser313,2020/01/19,"Is this common? Is it normal to feel down/kinda sad for no clear reason whatsoever. This has happened to me throughout my whole life. When I was younger Mum used to ask me what was wrong and why I was crying and I would just say that I didn't know. Because I genuinely did not know why I was feeling down. I still get this sometimes. Like these last couple of days. There is plenty to be happy about but it's like my brain is keeping secrets from me or something about why I'm feeling what. 


Anyone else experienced this?",1.9108304195804169,4.306491009615389,2.847272727272728,91.48863636363636,81.21153846153847,4.935664335664336,21.954545454545453,6.1124844417494595,0.2755115384615383,411,13,83,3,11,130,71,104,0.075,0.804,0.121,0.5803,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,0,0,13,2,1,2,1,18,24,5,0,2,4,1,3,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,10,2,0,1,7,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,5,12,3,10,16,1,6,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,7,56,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12349232305575306,0.18096148606129608,0.0,0.0,0.1651098581571552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107662000363689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19715916721191984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954195693197388,0.19400172677226055,0.11390114955997613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14753798526211495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679034012214469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227330717635396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15617880735182835,0.1880084422329062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15698226665038473,0.0,0.0,0.1941244117262311,0.14396364169027318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474739610229175,0.17256895020848675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.173043811817447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815881773215849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14045020921456144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596576403871788,0.1746753486677819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104383478455002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15253742906198314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.478098862006401,0.19718275714985692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546122141342714,0.19309922673221125,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pitiful_Flower,2020/01/19,"I don't know if something is wrong with me or not I have talked to social workers in the past and have sought non medication help for what I felt was depression. I don't believe I ever received an official diagnosis, but I believe it was or would be something related to social anxiety and some form of depression. I had a good run for a few months where I did not feel negative or really have any bad or unusually bad thoughts or feelings. However, it seems to have come back with more and more dark thoughts getting back into my head. I don't know what this means. I don't know if I should start to see someone again, if I should try to seek medical help for my issues, or if I should seek some sort of more serious psychiatric care? i don't know if this is the right place to post this, but I am afraid to reach out to other resources like the crisis life lines online or by phone. any advice or help would be appreciated. i know there's not a lot of info provided but I didn't want to go too deep into personal feelings or say something off limits.",7.6398591549295745,5.805032070422537,8.007140845070424,75.59296478873243,63.97652582159624,11.7124882629108,35.384507042253524,10.577609850970193,3.4169233802816894,833,30,172,17,10,276,117,213,0.136,0.732,0.132,-0.1927,1,0,3,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,7,10,0,1,7,0,24,4,1,0,1,55,44,20,0,11,20,0,4,1,0,5,3,1,0,1,8,9,0,1,14,0,0,4,10,7,0,0,8,6,20,3,23,29,8,21,0,2,1,0,10,9,0,19,8,121,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712445085102792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630159359087743,0.0,0.0916915119883312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18432775216571426,0.20015387313951186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700792279612305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220384559172914,0.0,0.0,0.1032475833433803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064680979939316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841897880701946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181812350446034,0.0,0.11508306621466982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626211790692965,0.0,0.0681184127359298,0.1005317191488982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300951763886622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24101610826806494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510125324223606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32935579964628553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465968402779801,0.05855686472878169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189950782248272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305611688951041,0.0,0.2414898885892381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567000253770898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144186097793589,0.0,0.10465591897721556,0.12522674149667254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479142066381134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678449757318513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235860184567132,0.0,0.0953163809847607,0.0,0.0,0.09551179757112407,0.1091147810223702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24436152656516724,0.10155581506928064,0.2768190515017377,0.0,0.0,0.08483654421803385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963378141329017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903087030754804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137613148682711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069571623341331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702882415901139,0.13104657918275214,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suprhype,2020/01/19,"Anxiety, Problems swallowing Hey, I thought i might find some people here who have the same problem as me. I suffer from Anxiety since about summer 2018. Sometimes for some days or even shorter a specific problem came up. I couldn't swallow, no pain or anything just no swallowing, like an invisible wall. Sometimes just food and liquid and when it was bad not even my saliva, so I had to spit it out every 3 min. This problem subsided every time after some hours/days. But now I have it already for about 6 months and it doesn't seem to go away. At the end of the year it was almost gone but now with the start of university and exam season, it came back. It's worse in the evening. I struggle to swallow liquids the most. I'm sick of this problem. Has someone maybe had similar experiences or could give me some tips. (I'm seeing a therapist btw). Thanks You!",2.9107859281437136,5.2359774251497,3.9548764970059866,85.29842252994014,77.1437125748503,6.809730538922158,27.203967065868262,7.865858978985527,1.793383532934132,678,28,129,11,16,219,110,167,0.175,0.765,0.06,-0.9588,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,0,13,11,0,1,9,0,11,8,1,0,0,34,23,12,0,7,8,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,10,8,5,0,3,0,0,4,5,9,0,0,8,1,11,2,19,12,6,24,0,1,1,0,4,6,0,11,15,89,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188468873100458,0.0,0.13432070639569452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18623046177411687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016493496951252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435965699411915,0.09359492950660066,0.10163085822325886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784298013129001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718326929454273,0.0,0.0,0.15699826288332214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780751840955033,0.0,0.0,0.24118412494210856,0.0,0.2051081797443452,0.0,0.0,0.11906521452982613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112495929538,0.0,0.14718393419521053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676461936922534,0.06917610574873331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059466093000371235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228379041723696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12912535754888174,0.0,0.0,0.09715549653492384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295183337032876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438510819387927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5823465311294658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969948350770464,0.11080903573039384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006877866805384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313269966911344,0.0,0.2407677746477884,0.0,0.08615382417870565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12724784980390208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206313843828516,0.0,0.14132594345331553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663183888245384,0.07097573099635753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12404276451061096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783834906320906
mentalhealth,sammyhammysam,2020/01/19,"Talking About Mental Health Hi everyone! I joined so that I can update the mental health community of a project I am doing. I have started an open forum blog where people can share their story, and hopefully break the stigma of mental health. I would appreciate any support :) 

Website: talkingaboutmentalhealth.org

Intagram: talkingabout.mentalhealth",9.552830188679248,13.46977220754717,7.245886792452833,61.9929811320755,62.77358490566037,9.52301886792453,33.241509433962264,9.888512548439397,4.353546415094339,289,12,33,7,5,84,42,53,0.0,0.76,0.24,0.9117,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,6,3,0,0,0,4,9,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,3,8,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,2,23,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575955753289815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907610788155657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6366122844083021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19828393158975804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.603559429527394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384027021176301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14130362950657396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265449536872198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604601286059341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418159286234837,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheEnvyOfEdensEye,2020/01/19,"Solitude brings solace. Isolation is peace Ever wondered what Lucifer feels like? Of course not. You think hes the worst thing to ever exist. There is something far worse though, the masses who'd ignorantly condemn one with only hearing a biased story from one source. 

Ever consider Atlus' plight? To carry the weight of earth upon his back? Of course not. The story tells you he was a fool but does not point out his willingness to help another.

Ever consider what the earth feels like? No. You tread upon it, spit on it, dump your garbage on it. Cutting off its limbs and scorching its face for profit. You do not consider the earth sustains your very existence.

There is an opposite to all things but you dont care. 

Ever considered the plight of the next man? No. You care only for self and what can be done for you. You scoff at any you think is less financially stable than you, anyone you think is of lesser intelligence you deem worthless,  but you never look in the mirror.

A dandelion is called a weed yet a rose is called beauty.  Your populace you call civilization yet uncivilized as a whole you live in a torrent of chaotic deeds. 

You live your whole life in pursuit of pieces of paper with dead mens faces printed on it while I live my life in pursuit of a place away from you. 

Depression is real and far reaching. Your world, your civilization, your ideation of life kills me slowly. When I lash out you call me crazy but anyone comfortable in today's world cannot be called sane.

Earth is a cage. I am not trapped here with you. I allow you to remain. The only thing stopping me from removing you is a yes or no decision that I make each time i draw a breath because I've never wished to treat others as they treat me. If i do you'll just call me a monster,  as i call you all monsters now.

For me isolation is comforting, solitude is solace. It's just better that way.",3.0368713105076783,5.416561801652897,3.765600944510037,86.53775206611574,76.98898071625345,6.683006690279418,23.31908697363243,7.760100539840176,1.2061001023219209,1486,47,284,23,35,471,188,363,0.174,0.701,0.125,-0.9553,1,3,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,30,1,1,16,19,3,0,23,1,25,8,4,2,9,44,38,15,2,2,13,0,3,2,0,1,3,1,0,3,17,9,1,2,7,0,1,2,12,8,0,2,2,5,49,10,45,32,8,42,0,2,1,0,50,22,0,3,19,202,66,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056755378850091985,0.08751465045842317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167137628751138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841302618418403,0.06417526819344466,0.0,0.05087618756444889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381321948943592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5965509639114434,0.0,0.17018521569272954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188361712477692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303604409822774,0.08540813064809291,0.09781401049258942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3774698579270176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439934637200044,0.11924708650690875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406501645954143,0.0,0.0559411996848526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092335663770354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17684991642837788,0.08154827375442407,0.0,0.2210890243065177,0.0,0.07008503045375554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055709920177370406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287383521006246,0.0,0.08876021406672717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310874769840487,0.1904243226532078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719750147351865,0.0,0.07889628309435323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949952778503554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706654763191796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425126497937929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977594902509987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729473547620332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634051672059788,0.160432593806016,0.08199861721326501,0.0,0.048665954405102685,0.0,0.07910992665095266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886289712658822,0.0,0.06624633279738314,0.0,0.10163128877343616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18635928931921916,0.09597440237023312,0.0,0.09050835834808628,0.0,0.0,0.08505244591656386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yvmqznrm,2020/01/19,"I don’t know who to talk to Anyone up to talk?

I feel lonely as shit and frustrated and stressed and all that

Also I’m a bit drunk,. so sorry if I say anything I shouldn’t",1.1323076923076911,1.97505094871795,3.3979487179487187,93.85538461538464,77.97435897435899,6.225641025641028,20.69230769230769,6.42735559955562,0.02552307692307698,133,3,33,1,3,46,29,39,0.344,0.6559999999999999,0.0,-0.9125,0,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,1,1,0,2,2,1,0,1,8,5,7,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,4,0,5,4,2,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,1,1,0,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24808744349064374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21691707787797293,0.0,0.25528938327646034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3386862030401543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685947517102006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704919751061111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24670399111706826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.318442304215109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472723611800282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3553625818525956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.498695460245832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chefniklas,2020/01/20,"I keep thinking about how things „could‘ve been“ I don‘t know. I just never get happy cause I always think, that if I‘ve done x school then i‘d be at x level of education now. Every time I want to study or try to learn something new I‘m just like „wow I could‘ve done that 3 years ago already“. I lost pretty much 3 years of school cause I want to do another school which I rlly like but I have to start from the beginning. I just feel like that I‘ll never be as educated as I could‘ve been...",1.1076545454545474,3.405626020000004,2.2334545454545487,95.2417272727273,83.8,5.236363636363637,19.090909090909093,6.574015621080383,-0.06349999999999989,382,10,85,4,11,121,65,100,0.04,0.8370000000000001,0.12300000000000001,0.6706,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,1,0,9,0,0,3,2,19,21,7,0,3,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,1,12,4,11,14,1,13,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,14,50,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13014615588804568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16201838120854264,0.0,0.12216514214654901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539524885083006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016470449548109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516689956633607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30049355583869336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237013121302152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423608124114305,0.1048874995154381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670685064133168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629152068979538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049944398627294,0.0,0.0,0.08068786473460376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21518499380879424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16027024622121108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107928834111168,0.0,0.2264716772395147,0.14179867342479613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14936767203088933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4457658993416511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302841388918107,0.0,0.0,0.10391922066906814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975399979879515,0.1881513318048132,0.0,0.0,0.08561132047092501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09968044129002923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17319526162538362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890932024772817
mentalhealth,pinkdrink96,2020/01/20,"My job ruins my mental health I hate my job (night shift nurse assistant at a hospital) and it’s more than the usual hate that people feel. Sometimes it makes me physically sick. Everyday I get off I cry in my car before I leave the parking lot. When I’m off for a few days in a row I spend majority of the first day in bed, in this weird heavy depressive state. I fight off breakdowns and just walking out when I’m there. I apply to new jobs everyday with no luck. At this point I’m scared of the direction that my mental health is going in because of this job. I want to talk to my manager and figure out if I have some options but I’m scared and the thought of that gives me more anxiety.",1.4407738095238116,3.4537607361111142,3.2533730158730165,90.05750000000002,80.5277777777778,6.8920634920634924,22.091269841269842,7.957251820313856,1.0174103174603175,542,17,119,10,14,181,87,144,0.18899999999999997,0.789,0.022000000000000002,-0.9567,4,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,4,9,3,2,8,0,2,3,0,1,0,19,15,8,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,8,7,0,0,3,0,1,3,1,8,0,1,1,1,17,1,22,14,6,27,0,2,0,0,3,13,0,5,10,74,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892228325320834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679509864013836,0.0,0.12115708779709415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15640057731301998,0.18364996893774116,0.0,0.12263390669851848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199291008432243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111054900177108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438902092817297,0.13658634386370253,0.08091930088061075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811466385063658,0.0,0.3026920468362141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5651709588497921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15076259279002388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104857705711597,0.0,0.0,0.09504147713316334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869763018801121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13751398208624466,0.0,0.13361640517581194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871015267303396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459755931672368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28509960093691444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082001139126155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444172368227774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130358634754337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568142951617533,0.0,0.083980934127733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SexyDanceRobot,2020/01/20,"I need advice. How to slow my brain down? I have ADHD and anxiety. When presented with a list of tasks, I get to part A. But while I am at part A, I am already thinking about part B. Then I get to part B and I am sweating over part C, and so on. I can't slow my mind down and strictly think in the present.

This has been hurting me at work, lately. I am making mistakes, I have to retrace my steps and just do double work. Luckily, my job has a wider margin for error and 90% of mistakes can be fixed quickly, easily, and don't cause fires.  

My therapist said ""In addition to your diagnosis, perhaps your displeasure with your current career situation, is sparking some of this thought racing. Coming into work unhappy or unfulfilled is a domino effect. Perhaps you're constantly thinking of the next thing because you want your day to be over with. Go home and do things you really enjoy."" 

I don't disagree with him, but is there anything I can do to slow my brain down, in the meantime? I want to do a good job at work, regardless of not liking what I do. I have my pride. 

Thanks.",1.7521464646464653,3.99732089814815,3.4807575757575755,87.59454545454545,80.75925925925927,6.519865319865321,24.63299663299664,7.686295010490155,1.3837759259259257,838,32,169,14,22,279,121,216,0.07200000000000001,0.836,0.092,0.7267,3,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,6,0,6,7,8,0,0,9,0,25,3,3,4,0,36,39,16,0,6,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,5,15,0,0,5,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,3,2,30,5,32,34,7,30,0,1,0,0,8,13,0,2,15,128,35,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737178933706587,0.11169702885289036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613785174618666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744262522222862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406285937873674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967895874779534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25520323665734873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742220219818815,0.0,0.09846320056915372,0.0,0.123522550849142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371694260468878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943876098427547,0.0,0.06496187822008019,0.0958731866217036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465672753336728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236532517700745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22685914610468044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894044824688342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05584340213867583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629913748872336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541495462569655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475533412595103,0.0,0.0,0.1215641263718177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6189031418073871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322638593879459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872974948031616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12848304068720212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523622099558806,0.0,0.13271632782133494,0.15187765380387416,0.21972511347180165,0.0,0.09074500048420724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483950445057752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33286013264305564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,liberty_haz,2020/01/20,"How to get Mental Health Services Hello Everyone,

Im very new to this community. Yet, I believe that I can benefit from counseling or therapy to help with some issues. I'm a 25-year-old male living in the Pacific NorthWest. I'm unsure how, where to seek treatment and the general cost. I dont believe I have severe issues, yet I have been feeling depressed for a few months. Thanks for any and all advice.",2.8888461538461527,5.437834230769234,4.550961538461539,79.80028846153847,78.48717948717949,7.489743589743591,28.98076923076923,8.472884824447931,2.6382769230769227,322,15,56,7,8,108,58,78,0.069,0.77,0.16,0.7170000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,4,0,5,1,0,2,1,10,10,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,5,2,9,9,3,6,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,2,4,36,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910963192310514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329856622670276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4406521950724027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843320621182695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291916859318068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868633697845781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887964101015373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217061202081268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20786825322616895,0.0,0.0,0.1310779284506547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21123542960452876,0.4082220040662523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726806687053214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19707575145310266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560919621218534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888704480293763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052044782229256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22092407307154568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18004287749254652,0.2236368026250055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16135524360068093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12593248233078494
mentalhealth,1994east,2020/01/20,"Aron Hernandez revelations 25(M) here, for my entire life I’ve always felt like I was a little different. I’ve been treated multiple times for a depression/anxiety disorder. Friends and family closest to me always thought I was bipolar. After taking numerous medications, I decided pills were not for me and that I would try to take care of my mental health in a more natural way. Flashback of my life since I’ve graduated high school has truly been me battling depression, anxiety and most importantly impulsivity. I dropped out of college and battle alcohol and marijuana addictions to somewhat keep my head straight. After watching this Aron Hernandez documentary on Netflix, I oddly share almost all the same qualities as him. My girlfriend as well as multiple other people have addressed this to me. The aggression, addictions and reckless behaviors run my life. Where do I go from this point? Do I have brain damage? Should I get an mri? Go see a therapist?",6.437857142857144,9.032897547619054,7.28166666666667,64.23000000000002,67.57142857142857,11.466666666666667,37.595238095238095,11.20814326018867,5.476638095238098,780,43,113,28,14,259,112,168,0.11699999999999999,0.748,0.135,0.5181,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,3,11,3,0,7,0,12,13,2,0,1,19,22,9,0,2,1,0,1,1,2,2,11,0,1,0,5,7,1,1,3,1,0,3,1,5,1,0,7,3,20,6,19,13,5,17,0,2,2,0,4,9,0,3,4,78,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32880909193935204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611694234184198,0.15101386616268495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509710643305243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307376121035093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835320668195808,0.0,0.0,0.1537602713176436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298919465760797,0.0,0.0,0.15756376287110865,0.17284067961525665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216971492864994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14480070900838818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165149964528864,0.0,0.078791706081772,0.0,0.1714169562060439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15477399025554595,0.1603033787112024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15933844955448598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13404635633496767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195634946530983,0.07367787293935539,0.1511506743193272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519246412015608,0.15198044111915565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455227451118372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256366330250653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15262720095423968,0.12017559543613775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475112420026176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22677985539276774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510137928050706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972584691301733,0.08793819513407165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238970791473706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970551100179612,0.0,0.0,0.13559579479627418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071306966745426,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dreamingofstanford,2020/01/20,"Should I drop out of college? (dx: AN, MDD, OCD) hi, I hope it's ok that I'm posting here. looking for advice as to whether I should drop out of school.

I have a history of psych admissions and was taken out of high school to be hospitalized. I graduated through a tutor that was sent to my bed on the unit and later to my house. A year and a half later, I was stable enough to accept my place at university! It was exciting to be independent and I managed a 3.93 first semester, but we're one week into second semester and I can already tell this isn't going to be easy.

I haven't attended any classes (missed 12 sessions so far). I cry myself to sleep some nights and sleep until 1 or 2 in the afternoon. I don't want to screw up my academic transcript, but I don't want to go back on my meds or engage in therapy because I somehow always end up worse off.  
It's so tempting to just throw my life away—go home, lay in bed all day, lose weight and refuse help until I waste away in a state hospital. That's what I deserve.

Should I leave school?",2.2222939068100374,3.746974672811064,4.119961597542243,86.99676779313879,76.46543778801843,7.402867383512545,24.95878136200717,8.167268648758528,1.4104584741423447,812,28,176,14,18,276,132,217,0.125,0.775,0.099,-0.7573,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,2,6,8,1,0,9,1,16,6,2,1,1,29,26,17,0,6,6,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,3,0,8,11,1,1,1,0,0,5,4,3,0,4,6,2,23,5,35,14,3,39,0,2,1,1,5,18,1,5,12,116,31,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069056274269387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15887983348866197,0.0,0.11979861357446416,0.0,0.0,0.09790783902245756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27053823269095834,0.1107077770391209,0.0,0.08776573574274267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814961850989867,0.09285187122017304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751898819886082,0.14876451290114853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122464938756719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24547268528447336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650331095373924,0.15211733987463094,0.1444185193157691,0.14299951773285355,0.0,0.1661276531086122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524485839178587,0.0,0.0,0.10169369846300558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090261784129053,0.16107103624946328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15992360793737245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511064900308126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756108835902208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150423080779346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13788811348850116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4371307214282359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881576653505409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258403698796502,0.0,0.16464779509042596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984020036990294,0.0,0.11548794485827958,0.17532258725920494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14672267813170833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271508670599006
mentalhealth,allfalldown2019,2020/01/20,"What can be done, if anything, if spouse refuses to see a professional, nor any desire to get better? After 25 years of marriage, and three (grown to almost grown) children, my high functioning wife has had a complete mental breakdown.

It relates to a career decision she made that backfired, and cost her some salary/prestige.  The amount of the salary cut she took, and the cost of being out of work for a while, is in an isolated number if I typed it out, sounds meaningful.  However, in the context of our overall current financial situation (savings, my income, her income potential, etc), it is at most, a slight inconvenience.  In the context of our overall life and plan, it is barely a blip.  We have spent at least half our marriage in a much more challenging financial situation.

However, she has absolutely collapsed mentally and emotionally in the past six months.  She is incapable of any conversation that isn't a variation of:

\-wanting to wake up from the nightmare/go back in time

\-She's ruined our lives

\-Everything is lost and is all over

She cannot and will not enjoy anything in life, including time with her children.  She will not participate in anything she previously did for household or for enjoyment. She's broken off her friend group.  She mainly just paces, and babbles the same things over and over.  She's basically becoming agoraphobic and can't interact with anyone...the trajectory is that she will not be attending our childrens' graduations, weddings, etc.

She, and our children have been begging her to see someone for months, and she's a hard refusal.  Her opinion is that it's too late, and a therapist can't do anything because they don't have a time machine.  The damage has been done, and there's nothing they can do or say to help, it's all over and we're ruined, and our children's futures are ruined.  She refuses to even look at financial numbers, budgets, etc that show otherwise, she's set her mind that we're going bankrupt, going to lose the house, etc...anything I try to explain why we are fine financially is ""you don't know, you don't know, it's over.""

She does not want to get better, does not believe there is any future, any possibility of any hope for the future.  Here only context to discuss things being better is that we can go back in time and she not leave the job she had.  That's where it begins and ends, she will not consider anything moving forward.

I don't have any mental health experience, so I don't want to armchair diagnose...it seems like depression, obsessive thinking, anxiety, delusion...anything and everything.  It's basically the type of state I would expect someone to be in from losing a child, or more specifically, accidentally causing the death of a child.  She's that level of distraught, all the time, without relief, and it's been going on for months.

Is there anything that can be done when someone flat out refuses help or any effort to get better?  Or are our lives ruined, and this just something I live with and try to keep things together as long as I can before it all falls apart?  Everything I read online about supporting someone with mental illness presupposes that they want to get better, at least in some moments of clarity, but there isn't one second of the last six months, despite encouraging, begging, crying, screaming, threatening, etc where she has given an inch, even the slightest consideration, to wanting to get better or to see a therapist.

Sorry for the length, this actually leaves out plenty of detail, but it's still probably too long.",7.849425623459632,8.144065105100466,7.808091398972389,70.22779272317142,62.55486862442041,10.765846526588414,36.9609841680939,10.46424986305757,4.0133927816533665,2821,126,472,61,37,909,281,647,0.102,0.8370000000000001,0.061,-0.96,8,0,1,0,0,0,113.0,11,2,3,13,19,30,1,2,34,0,60,5,1,2,4,90,92,39,1,12,21,2,1,1,1,5,4,3,0,7,29,33,0,5,8,2,4,11,19,13,0,6,14,8,55,17,80,67,19,74,0,9,4,0,71,34,0,16,30,342,84,9,0.0,0.0,0.0553559839587141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056802475035725525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700273803528678,0.0,0.04339491393854227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734425563898414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872369401295735,0.0,0.03457938746124429,0.06264894713410839,0.04826929110342944,0.0639103042354512,0.0,0.3010149980189132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05827279711599007,0.0,0.0,0.05947569207045991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0623103867246275,0.0,0.0,0.04885765949983132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928187580132014,0.17414989114188573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380864318570162,0.05024202741852898,0.0,0.3163200858180059,0.07493342206568455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15294388262626188,0.05548850266894398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438260429023974,0.0,0.1481838731587277,0.0,0.1611922736469849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050814978229923584,0.0,0.0,0.0602966396315963,0.0,0.0,0.07604392198212108,0.05993369041555159,0.0,0.056341300948580086,0.0,0.06545370395695571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056291385902268384,0.05042030247172366,0.0,0.0,0.062349791254960214,0.04623891929857435,0.06398892577447668,0.12012839877889492,0.0,0.0,0.08013391038677624,0.02771325338968915,0.0,0.15026918094518876,0.10040070766461648,0.04763520105006852,0.12692282982917685,0.06192267219576125,0.0,0.0,0.053675115985654005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286641732167651,0.0,0.05727666581915111,0.0,0.1811112691500753,0.060290314996765036,0.04169982871251154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0544297245386141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038438721523351184,0.04314236024288599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05415098537119562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394956901665629,0.0,0.0,0.061159770194910625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056740931405626326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04511045853724588,0.0,0.0,0.13560883049595251,0.05164083816712748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752385873625444,0.0,0.0,0.192253601639846,0.04367012335156878,0.0,0.06349964335481442,0.0,0.0,0.045301121988809055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437151670202751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172554253511035,0.11305786564487925,0.03634746160701728,0.0,0.0,0.16538571128325105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06302420731570865,0.07702589140359606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16729108590569394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051186013444087165,0.0,0.0,0.054681435497137665,0.0,0.04129689831734739,0.0,0.0,0.0402962249629448,0.0,0.0,0.03652941412246289
mentalhealth,throwaway39572195,2020/01/20,"I think my boyfriend is mentally ill. But psych doesn't seem concerned. I've been with my boyfriend more than 5 years. He's always had a bit of a temper, but nothing extreme enough to worry about. In the past two years I've noticed some changes in his behaviour that really worry me. (He is in his late 20s - early 30s) He's been engaging in more and more generally reckless behavior, has started to become enraged over even the tiniest things, he has threatened me in fits of anger and I have felt unsafe, is over-exaggerating everything and saying things  then swearing 100% that he never said it, decreased empathy and an emergence of extreme selfishness, constant irritability, extremely low self-esteem, he's paranoid that everyone hates him all the time, constantly unsure of what he wants/likes, says he feels empty all the time, talks about how nobody would miss him if he died and says he'll just in front of a bus/train etc but swears he's just joking when I ask him about it later, gets upset/clingy/needy when I'm away from him and also has panic attacks, cannot sleep unless I'm next to him. And of course there are more things as well. 

These things have been severely affecting my own not so great mental health. I'm very concerned.

I convinced him to see a psychologist and he's been seeing him for a month now, but the psychologist has cut back his sessions from fortnightly to monthly as the psychologist thinks his symptoms are not very concerning. (despite being told of the violent outbursts and threats) The psychologist has not diagnosed him with anything, nor has he had any kind of treatment except just talking.

Should I be telling him to get a different psychologist? What is the best course of action? Is the psychologist right and it's not that concerning? What are the likely diagnoses foe his symptoms?

Any advice would be helpful, I'm not coping well and need help. So does he.",5.721166883963496,7.42242452824859,5.653333333333336,78.78148631029987,67.84180790960451,8.722990004345936,30.847023033463717,9.162432508145574,2.7275375054324207,1529,61,270,29,26,478,195,354,0.21899999999999997,0.7070000000000001,0.07400000000000001,-0.996,1,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,0,1,18,22,9,1,18,0,30,7,1,2,3,44,51,27,1,5,15,0,2,1,0,4,6,4,0,0,15,13,0,0,5,1,0,2,9,13,2,1,9,8,24,9,36,35,12,34,0,2,2,0,39,12,0,3,21,174,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723930053721112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957752200536762,0.08279967868643334,0.0,0.0,0.13533942288745365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188764505602805,0.0,0.0930277285346622,0.11320615276408875,0.09349222862785153,0.07651648122981637,0.0,0.0,0.1099001634017582,0.0,0.0,0.10442883272574274,0.0,0.10863834298150901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526760624102943,0.0,0.0,0.21506832488735173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019996154357758,0.1032749049435082,0.10396600080694182,0.0,0.0,0.08708122700004439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281966961581307,0.1109791327992819,0.06572492999477803,0.0,0.0,0.09508536557372932,0.08943250956766312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050314873504039404,0.0,0.09554449801967917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397896608725732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970931421924836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824479616093593,0.0,0.10577369375265357,0.0,0.0,0.13339792341052242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10362358495404173,0.0,0.0,0.11225078345633156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04861519970002785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20056386539789592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15885468937638805,0.0,0.0,0.07378485794872451,0.07674767850110166,0.0,0.10582923055528357,0.0,0.0,0.09548182203128593,0.11329195594676993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675268015497108,0.0,0.0,0.09499285164236326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374818222724822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498036725140908,0.09465609690457356,0.2374012808431908,0.0,0.0,0.15859199887614747,0.0905894961111198,0.10380986391114252,0.11241714347901532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995811278200942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043316882013277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068564522199457,0.0,0.159963553186384,0.08697548227751735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644381318785502,0.12752303598333034,0.0,0.0,0.11604930346514734,0.0,0.0,0.09508536557372932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720609109996793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16421112754946285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789415567936058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20211297459546168,0.0,0.14137705134682366,0.0,0.0,0.12816140620640934
mentalhealth,gorblorgzorb,2020/01/20,"I'm just venting I've always felt a bit off. I didn't have a so called ""bad"" childhood. I didn't really get bullied either since I am a pretty self critical person. Never have I felt that there's something wrong with myself. I don't really see the bad things in myself as bad things. 

I always had these periods when I'm really depressed about things. Not as in I feel bad about myself or really anything. More like just being bored of reality and existence. It's a kinda melancholic feeling. This last year it got worse, maybe because I've had so much stress about things that are not really relevant. I feel like I exist but not really, like I'm not myself. I feel like Plankton controlling SpongeBob but i am Plankton and SpongeBob.

I don't feel like the world has flaws. I'm not depressed about the situation of the world. I don't stress about my bad habits, my looks or anything like that. In fact I'm really happy with myself as i am. I just feel like nothing is in place in a kind of cosmic level (Not like religiously but you get it.) 

In my early teenage years I did some selfharm but I feel like it was just some teen angst thing so i would get attention. Though lately I got a huge urge to hurt myself and to know what death feels like so I started burning myself with cigarettes. It's not that i don't like myself, not even that it's a way to ""feel at least something"". Now that i have these burns over my arms it just feels like I want more of that adrenaline feeling. 

If I could be reborn infinite times, I'd shoot myself with a shotgun until I finally die permanently.  
I don't feel suicidal I feel it's more like masochism but in a non-sexual way.

I crave everything but nothing is made for me. I feel like I'm drifting through time but it's okay, its alright. Everything in my life is starting to go off the road but it's not like I'd care about that. I sleep whenever and wake up whenever. One week I go to sleep very very early. Sometimes I sleep once every two days, sometimes even once every three days. Sometimes i almost sleep the whole weekend. At first it didn't really affect my studying but now it starts to. 

I am not from this planet. Or so I feel like. I observe life around me and try to learn everything about it but it's getting hard since every day i feel like i watch the world through more and more dirty blurry lenses. I feel like i'm sinking into my own head but it doesn't feel bad. In all honesty i am a very anxious person. Maybe it's just my personality or maybe i have a disorder. 

After all i don't really care, None of this feels bad. None of this is an obstacle for my mind but more for the progress of my life. If i was the one choosing i would never do anything.  
The thing that really gets to me is how everyone around me keeps telling me that ""That's life, you can't always just get what you want"". 

Why do i have to get a stable job to get money to pay my bills. Why do i have to be like this and that. I understand that i CAN be myself and i CAN be expressive of my own style and all that and i am that.  
Truthfully no one can be themselves. Yeah you can wear the clothes you like or listen to your own preferred music but after all you are just going to have to grow to be a normal job going, bill paying, social rules following man/woman who is a prisoner of themselves and the system.

I really understand the importance of all the kinds of systems and such to keep order i feel like there's really no other way to keep the world up. 

I love Earth. Nature is beautiful. Humans are beautiful. How we got here, how we have learned so much about things and how we keep building and manipulating everything around us is in my eyes so beautiful. We know so much about everything, there's good people and bad people. Sometimes we need bad people for balance. I don't see tech as a bad thing i think it's just awesome how humankind has gotten this far. We are living the future. I wouldn't change a thing in this world. 

I just wish i could only keep observing this world. I wish someone would build a small pod with eyes and transfer my brain in it so i could just keep observing life around me.

I feel out of place in this world and in my body but i don't want out. I know there's no way out. I know the consequences of me ending it for myself. People would be sad i'm sure. My family would never stop grieving after me. And to be honest i don't even want to end it. Like i said i love the world we live in. I just really don't know how i can stop feeling so empty.",1.9665086076714005,3.9466495238095263,3.4523970603040404,89.4471836303232,78.65367965367966,6.6786267995570325,21.45847176079734,7.697636035934039,0.8157136212624585,3536,99,748,55,86,1163,307,924,0.128,0.6809999999999999,0.191,0.9969,2,0,3,2,0,2,89.0,8,7,0,3,54,55,0,2,36,3,74,19,12,10,11,170,157,62,4,20,44,0,25,22,0,6,5,2,0,5,60,38,0,9,37,1,5,7,34,20,0,7,16,33,119,35,93,123,25,95,0,6,6,2,29,45,0,11,58,509,179,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03398560670920025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472139782056169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03834208733508584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378819656600227,0.12085375800509512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833814823711777,0.020689265067477498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03705325278358081,0.037699244325394295,0.0,0.0378878179594578,0.034656126146548595,0.0,0.06920736805548519,0.0,0.03590359643680507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03806614720193095,0.08129402642807412,0.0,0.0,0.06566470249789808,0.0,0.05846425527933265,0.0,0.03522394629788689,0.0,0.038897721845137866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060120823363596636,0.0,0.0,0.0672503568752196,0.0,0.08578673009144848,0.032430742129620514,0.15251361964553609,0.0,0.03199523421457914,0.0,0.377539392282525,0.3152039401127199,0.06517467663891156,0.03717917270790571,0.0,0.028869006315140125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185632103252124,0.0,0.07715462698810535,0.028466926121265026,0.08143379538311207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03612933517062925,0.030403215070691623,0.0,0.034831821045969144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03633304362108148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06735963181840521,0.1810024547928782,0.0,0.07068574100576062,0.09326158246885737,0.027665303755715562,0.03828534696327593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11986271552262512,0.3647858311512716,0.0,0.05993857698283778,0.0,0.02850071598787039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061263627954249736,0.03211447002638244,0.0,0.0,0.1022906695984364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034269320780822884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484853314436203,0.025165783259783633,0.07852893519937994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03325360181757618,0.065131922871178,0.0,0.0,0.07228913239511682,0.0689950537159933,0.025812595081450083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411778063509864,0.08890424849688285,0.07091931638635665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034528774578702896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826534977849081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03228433157075357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409093385022866,0.0,0.035406404620727576,0.0,0.0,0.05615037547655762,0.038149532272353716,0.13585644259025756,0.034597147957388705,0.028756912835442638,0.05225672424433015,0.13426852843654385,0.0,0.07206787043185678,0.0,0.0,0.056750050419416775,0.07775539397244975,0.0,0.0,0.037124413642663966,0.0,0.03198767122298718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029664706238673337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20293165859965728,0.02174712517855811,0.03334548455586975,0.0,0.03958090724362831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02304276046089325,0.0,0.033154057460577695,0.07066464082712254,0.04082515977623052,0.0,0.0,0.08401117301654783,0.08007382140260752,0.10775869848794434,0.027224299814164632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061250419839222886,0.037892351206817665,0.0780577297705386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03458735181318308,0.12054858988052608,0.03710762453504505,0.0,0.04371197913128652
mentalhealth,bumboy42069,2020/01/20,I recently found out my mothers homeless and it’s messing with me heavy I wanna start by saying she didn’t become homeless because drugs  she used to take prescribed pills for pain when I was younger and she did get attached to them but she quit  when I was taken away by my dad. The reason she did was because itall unfortunate events I seen unfold since I was 12 I’m now 16 I feel terrible because I’m now old enough to get a job and I wanna start getting money for her but I don’t have good grades and I got to take a 0 period now and I have summer school already  and I’m really trying to get my grades up but it’s hard and I’m not motivated at all and my moms alone in the cold by herself and she’s been through the worst I’m pretty sure my sister (19) doesn’t even know because she cut contact with her a year ago once my mom started to hang around a bad crowd and so much is on my mind and I don’t wanna talk to my friends about it cuz we don’t really talk about emotional topics with each other and I don’t want to talk to my dad I don’t know why I’m just not mentally strong enough for all this shit going on right now,0.5685365853658553,2.512793934959351,2.4939414634146355,94.70837560975613,83.22764227642277,5.399414634146343,19.596097560975608,6.55674776486733,0.0052479999999999185,892,24,206,9,25,297,130,246,0.158,0.767,0.075,-0.9723,1,1,1,0,0,0,3.0,1,0,1,3,12,11,2,0,7,0,17,4,1,4,3,41,42,19,0,4,6,6,2,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,5,19,0,0,6,0,1,2,9,7,0,0,12,5,36,4,32,30,7,27,0,0,1,0,25,9,1,0,16,131,41,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069750519143642,0.0,0.0,0.12498751619946855,0.1331727750435777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743029690359493,0.0,0.0,0.1133823167224402,0.0,0.10076230078615504,0.2942602928504815,0.13328097230697525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994984994945844,0.0,0.0,0.13574813934501087,0.0,0.2493882650307013,0.0,0.0797076392187762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061019156428420325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323187890968012,0.09323664447057538,0.0,0.25220012911030765,0.0,0.06858491305225962,0.10122019788615164,0.0965183812281672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081050842202375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197557339551332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13264454043911214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12161650248032856,0.0,0.1218518436476961,0.28267662890752004,0.0,0.0,0.08871328202756013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12663278333718134,0.12851967674490136,0.0,0.0,0.12841144437906127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277438669473445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835745084687888,0.0,0.0,0.15462069294637565,0.1240785747439456,0.1191563989675399,0.0,0.0,0.10305959175753546,0.0,0.0959691431395863,0.0,0.12213404716244987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387572222298412,0.09982728891956512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562526096169148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373895436814513,0.0,0.1814718567913597,0.2909927143295593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193342560974608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422829873774396,0.0,0.0,0.07117986688609955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889443402364267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771360980135802
mentalhealth,legalizemywillto,2020/01/20,"Thoughts on going to the ER I’ve been having mental breakdowns for the past three days, unabling me to eat or go out on the street. Is there some signs that I should go to the ER. Last time I went they changed a bit my medication and let me got. I self harmed the next day. The thing is that I can’t find my will to live, but I think they need a real threat to take it seriously. Could you please tell me which alarming signs will make them react and not let me go back home just like that. Just to know if it’s worth it going to the ER.
Thanks",2.0582051282051275,3.1309190940170915,2.792820512820516,98.19384615384618,76.00854700854703,5.883760683760682,18.982905982905983,5.82211442006289,-0.5572119658119656,422,7,106,2,9,132,78,117,0.086,0.812,0.102,0.4497,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,3,0,4,6,1,1,9,0,11,2,0,2,0,22,25,5,0,4,6,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,1,8,3,1,0,4,0,1,6,2,4,3,1,4,0,15,2,11,15,2,17,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,3,8,66,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729429359106606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18073284218598307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512521954881452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321746346616642,0.0,0.0,0.21352634244302268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16939440506047546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130561475927914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4704166967744166,0.0,0.1324018827311829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16605566374322836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097949356731284,0.1349417015265299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33856303972365204,0.0,0.08087718363599015,0.0,0.14617973539278473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050292635500708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16676970459508555,0.16683095690873348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12274991242854075,0.0,0.0,0.17605954858744116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15803193967711665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18171927888910672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842705498320364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172700091300125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12446963571166746,0.0,0.14469408940808173,0.15241208172600132,0.0,0.0,0.10998109379507204,0.10607489080248372,0.0,0.13142465872662668,0.09653092947362812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534623642812714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,badusernamebad,2020/01/20,"I think it's time for me to commit my self to mental hospital I don't know what's wrong with me. I'm on anxiety meds but their not working anymore and i think they are making  things worse. It's getting to the point where I can't leave the house. I can't focus on anything when it noisy or when there's to much light. To much stimuli causes me to have panic attacks. I'm also really depressed and I'm deling with suicidal thoughts. I can't live like this anymore. 

Any advice about committing my self to a mental hospital. I live in Ontario Canada and I'm on disability for untreated reasons and don't have money for a psychiatrist or anything like that.",2.2420763447079253,4.472934977443612,4.015037593984964,84.49888953152114,78.92481203007519,6.7990746096009245,25.26836321573164,7.882392219407189,1.612125968768074,524,20,101,9,13,176,77,133,0.237,0.7190000000000001,0.044000000000000004,-0.9838,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,1,6,6,1,1,4,0,8,0,0,3,2,19,18,10,1,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,7,6,0,0,5,0,1,0,6,4,0,0,1,1,14,2,17,17,2,9,0,1,0,0,4,6,0,2,5,65,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991827359564305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226883024677727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043294867230831,0.0,0.11736433409748773,0.0,0.3042988212774439,0.0,0.0,0.2524998495009663,0.0,0.0,0.1745350993788995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157602525475729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213868060391687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015456199263925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770237496035061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431450909338505,0.0,0.0,0.16244748807256265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14990455030569744,0.0,0.270941772607794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024076923676383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17041278918619165,0.0,0.30921847730296165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255597342930284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18000294273815193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502957933439276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09828348591125736,0.15773923425585482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200968228643635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16781436840331426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192408826747572,0.19660809253744008,0.0,0.12179673846065878,0.08945925737512894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169011599311747,0.0,0.15634602758014204,0.0,0.16773847620153445,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shxtsandgxgglxs,2020/01/20,"Best way to help my(16m) girlfriend(17f) who’s relapsing into bulimic habits? My girlfriend suffered from depression anxiety and a couple eating disorders for a couple years and was sectioned for  a while. She stopped going to camhs summer of last year and was improving really well up until December when her anxiety and insecurities started up again. I was in camhs and a few mental health things but for different reasons so I’m sorry if I got any terms wrong. She started making herself throw up recently and I’m worried she might spiral. I know basically nothing about eating disorders so any information or ways to safeguard her would be a great help, and if it gets worse the we’ve agreed that we’ll go to the appropriate people.",4.778249138920781,7.612599798507464,5.601641791044779,73.26075200918486,73.40298507462686,8.899196326061999,30.456946039035593,9.466822959209583,3.4783715269804825,599,27,94,16,13,195,95,134,0.158,0.6859999999999999,0.157,0.4270000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,1,6,7,0,1,7,0,7,3,0,2,0,19,17,16,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,4,8,2,1,3,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,4,0,11,3,16,9,4,24,0,2,0,0,12,6,0,4,13,64,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955701960689919,0.0,0.2200045888452929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509033129867347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182114561911319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238498744971216,0.0,0.0,0.15023450468848926,0.32960159644399123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2942750641317941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512661998583528,0.0,0.1634433009313816,0.0,0.11500548828038068,0.1585337932931445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15284668417235894,0.0,0.0,0.1927646614710866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902562158012515,0.11721159815342234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959838541546319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14491089751742106,0.15254309593830076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797456984290313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09968890618645407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211835126260544,0.14784455449815198,0.14197958638156902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609660172144124,0.20355678104773006,0.0,0.0,0.12021852649228375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553058561253892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282745451890312,0.0,0.0,0.12928840171026149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603015598268046,0.14653874100624353,0.102147390101356,0.15721656316646065,0.0,0.18519771109936325
mentalhealth,sirtommygun666,2020/01/20,"Friend's mother is ""speaking to demons"". I need some guidance on how to approach the situation. So clearly the woman is suffering from some sort of mental illness which to me seems like an early sign of psychosis. She may or may not be abusing drugs, that wasn't made clear to me. They took her to the doctors and they just said she's just ""tired"", but this has been an ongoing issues of these delusions and it only seems to be getting worse.

How should we approach the situation and get her the help she clearly needs?",5.070957142857143,6.294274010000002,5.085428571428572,84.04700000000003,68.9,7.314285714285713,30.285714285714285,7.447530270364453,1.8121714285714283,411,16,78,4,7,128,70,100,0.08900000000000001,0.792,0.11900000000000001,0.5002,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,2,0,5,3,0,0,7,0,10,4,0,3,3,26,19,8,0,3,5,1,0,1,1,3,4,2,0,1,5,4,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,5,2,11,2,11,9,2,5,1,1,0,0,14,1,0,8,2,57,16,1,0.0,0.23783111361994136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054546993740484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23278198329913055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508277446424254,0.0,0.20974529899030228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13454445828469522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20950898845515067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980660799031086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899346907792556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022876813336952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976761103476446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15266349595611328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19093930333798426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3654723962394966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4512557491728882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307085269818294,0.0,0.0,0.22301737235772773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045600617451716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ElBambiNoo,2020/01/20,"I need to not care so much about what people think All my life I've been extremely self conscious ever since I was a kid. I didn't have a dad and everything new terrified me. As a kid I thought as soon as I walked in somewhere new I'd have a really bad time I thought everyone would bully me and make me feel really bad those things never happened i always made friends fast and I was with the ""cool kids"" until I moved schools it got bad I had friends but I was too shy to walk up to them or go with them during lunch I'd hang out alone at lunch until one of my friends asked me why I was a loner if I had friends. I didn't know how to react but he told me to hang out with him and after that I started to become more confident so I became more and more popular.
Anyway one day I got  into a bad accident, I was in middle school, my mom never took me to the hospital and it left  a pretty noticable and deep scar on my cheek I didn't want to go to school but my mom made me I had a terrible sinking feeling for days but when it was time I felt like I flipped a primal switch to swallow my pride I told myself I wouldn't become an outcast and I was the first one at school I had a positive attitude, lied to all my friends that I had got my scar in a street fight they all ate the story up I was actually starting to become more popular because of it but that social anxiety drowning feeling was always there it didn't help that one of my best friends who I hung out with a lot started to avoid me. I got the message and it made me fall Deep into my anxiety. It made me feel shameful like I did something wrong I felt ugly because some people would tell me I was. Even though a lot of pretty girls went out with me and actually liked me I could never make it work and I always ended relationships because I felt I was ugly and I was holding them back. I spent my teen years trying to find a way to make my scar go away, nothing ever worked and I had no money so I gave up. My last years in school were the best i made amazing friendships with people i used to be intimidated by I let my real personality come out but after scschool ended I felt empty I fell into my anxiety again and I feel like people stare at me all the time I feel a sinking feeling I would always get some stares because of it in school but I never really cared because I was so happy. Now i care a lot and I don't know how to become the person who didn't care what people thought about me. I fear I'll never be happy again",2.2412590799031453,3.5180713220338973,4.1184920634920665,88.05334745762713,75.89265536723164,6.865052461662632,23.75396825396825,7.447530270364453,0.9127086898036044,1956,59,429,24,42,665,212,531,0.162,0.6609999999999999,0.177,0.9593,0,2,1,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,4,6,21,33,1,3,25,1,38,6,1,12,11,97,91,37,1,8,10,3,11,4,6,4,1,0,0,7,19,30,4,2,19,0,2,13,14,10,0,5,50,14,90,23,60,33,16,74,0,0,2,0,34,26,0,7,38,303,109,8,0.0,0.0,0.1051742349457082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05581193158295672,0.0,0.0,0.17935722357048733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367299470527884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05037820004179518,0.0,0.05062974524216418,0.04143670557809726,0.17997761084053296,0.16424875691126936,0.23806116751165524,0.0,0.0,0.11310469916995568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21977047778430467,0.0,0.0,0.046419919544220194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04302534910922617,0.0,0.0,0.06950687211009805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545791471805734,0.0,0.0,0.035592653106392806,0.09748993846277827,0.0,0.05149249200614114,0.048431246556350775,0.0,0.0,0.060639215735565466,0.1907324796244768,0.03849774651302045,0.2069645216516208,0.0,0.049252845781401794,0.045837282136996414,0.0,0.0,0.24980337463038596,0.0,0.028154364489997745,0.0,0.091877731263661,0.0,0.17239729065444398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04765316430452298,0.11472999877863665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03612012986123468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05923109956058109,0.043926081826771934,0.0,0.0,0.05854969559140595,0.0551043436468672,0.03806283492505058,0.10530822558554766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374414819662283,0.0,0.25495162653163544,0.1079123917274785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622643566665606,0.0,0.05727463682291141,0.039614033285692116,0.0399574233655643,0.20780954029374452,0.1040911340361753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05170718888245157,0.06135208189766801,0.0,0.0,0.14606417732633145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18679649110473776,0.09410620919991253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096473612518292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133657825518528,0.10356649766037797,0.0,0.0,0.057855768218669286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272264602795225,0.0,0.0,0.05621715345310685,0.0,0.0,0.0445768824655987,0.0,0.0,0.054932241683239166,0.0,0.0414857752046419,0.0,0.0,0.11442705280316767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04710066895028795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035800930852279325,0.034529387731484444,0.05294489068647527,0.1283436531770662,0.09426794220553013,0.0,0.0,0.10298498401228227,0.05987178181525131,0.03658655587003229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04654210960457245,0.0,0.0,0.031784661232813954,0.04277395116572666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04995490863455365,0.048625725882839664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846251435792581,0.0,0.0,0.11484191035711973,0.058918295859548164,0.0,0.06940447822606513
mentalhealth,JCuzzi,2020/01/20,Why don’t I know what I wanna do? Since I was in kindergarten I had always had anxiety when the question “what do you wanna be when you grow up?” came up and like I never knew what I wanted to do I always thought eventually I’ll get it find my passion but no it never came and now I’m about to be 23 with no guidance and I feel stuck still not knowing what I wanna do. Have I done everything I needed to in my life is this it?,1.8193920972644368,2.6379180212765974,4.083313069908815,89.70500000000001,76.23404255319149,6.648024316109423,23.003039513677805,6.868970318607317,0.5510018237082068,330,9,77,3,7,115,56,94,0.114,0.843,0.043,-0.7383,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,13,2,0,0,2,22,25,6,0,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,7,0,0,3,6,0,0,0,9,1,15,2,12,14,0,13,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,7,62,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3627151320873646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673639982142846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4985691624415105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230455387730101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19588557006112184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102055362925396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19920861962115408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138734624849054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395667782218183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15394937457909005,0.1064827114089903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16161224851047715,0.3362035310589538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441615627677262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802961652692874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17406062837185807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17303339926125874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855660193559412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19667216335456625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway187490,2020/01/20,"Recently been suffering from severe anxiety, and I need help Recently my anxiety has been getting worse and I don't want to see a therapist. My family tells me I should go see one, but I don't want to. I have a hard time opening up to people I've just met and it takes a while to gain my trust. I mainly don't want to see a therapist because my anxiety is something I'm very private about and I don't want to tell someone who I've just met about it. What should I do?",1.9970544554455432,3.2210482475247564,4.288205445544556,86.80478341584158,76.42574257425744,8.614356435643566,26.48638613861386,9.188382445141503,2.0707514851485147,367,14,83,9,8,128,54,101,0.18,0.706,0.113,0.3695,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,4,0,12,0,0,0,0,15,26,6,0,7,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,4,4,13,1,10,20,1,7,0,1,3,0,6,2,0,0,4,53,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36888910547614906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798352042328512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152813185423775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397822302851875,0.0,0.091350296211388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439883937441309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773833386945926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191841290621358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891925889807888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114344981682067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31741594052537697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842587040435633,0.0,0.0,0.18158657087217733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619157311448024,0.1237428635224254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208538958071561,0.0,0.2809816917234935,0.0,0.0,0.3732550902390352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372678586284508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262450293591946,0.3792263712211929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16380429569253754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FatherChrimbus,2020/01/20,"Getting apathetic Hi there,

I'm 26 and married (for now at least). 

I've been dating my now wife for about 10 years now. About a year ago I became addicted to alcohol. A short time after that I started compulsively lying about everything, big or small. From getting promotions at work, to being in a car accident, to what time I would come home from work. 

I recently got discovered, and naturally my wife is furious. 

I'm going to my first AA meeting later tonight, and I'm starting therapy that specializes in sexual abuse later this week. 

The worst part is that I feel very little emotion or remorse. I don't know if I'm in shock or just apathetic and depressed. But it's really hard for me feel right now. And that makes me want to drink again and end my massive 12 hours of sobriety already. 

I don't really know what I'm looking for by posting this here other than are there others that feel this way? Is this normal with alcoholism? For others struggling with something like this, how did you cope?",4.002545336787563,5.9664761295336834,5.19416774611399,79.30762467616582,72.67875647668394,8.762823834196894,28.64281088082901,9.354420925462401,2.7235598445595848,795,32,146,19,16,263,121,193,0.179,0.802,0.019,-0.9847,0,0,4,0,1,0,23.0,0,1,0,4,13,7,1,1,4,0,10,4,0,2,0,25,30,12,0,4,6,2,4,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,16,9,3,0,5,1,0,3,2,5,1,1,3,5,14,2,26,25,3,37,0,1,1,0,5,10,0,4,23,95,30,3,0.0,0.17611017642632906,0.0,0.1620359354053183,0.0,0.0,0.13175746047368145,0.3176948438780561,0.0,0.0,0.16402428725176976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803735017131154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12802056622543026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560737295124898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16719627412234447,0.13164799264393495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358507587807114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22546553464702074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643029547444695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15531307509581502,0.0,0.08447365819282747,0.0,0.11887834193185715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314928206395535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490947225748157,0.0,0.14637720241657062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337367901393116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261638046556608,0.14897301504664148,0.0,0.0,0.12481738734768978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921614702694492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14563240097324964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095905441152655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235286529965138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904409437034336,0.0,0.1467608030676146,0.0,0.0,0.12693492402599998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442778831068486,0.0,0.0,0.2104116332339277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538734442714566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997901271850074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17334250245164054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264083854832505,0.08766977281090584,0.11798088875185547,0.11922738981787012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21641856609848792,0.0,0.0,0.10558724239586878,0.0,0.0,0.19143431460760305
mentalhealth,anonymous_roll,2020/01/20,"(17F) I might finally see a therapist soon, but now I'm starting to get really anxious and just overall terrified. Any tips or advice, please ?",3.1925641025641016,6.113868000000004,5.036153846153848,74.39217948717952,80.53846153846153,9.620512820512822,31.743589743589745,9.725611199111238,4.280220512820514,112,6,18,4,3,38,25,26,0.26899999999999996,0.637,0.094,-0.7572,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,5,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,10,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188696348954742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219042718564801,0.0,0.0,0.36864121090040336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3574603314508596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704852604342045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461669038668904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3581940748500261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090446915984758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26002949681661186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309662729177337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.378874956940827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SHWP03,2020/01/20,"1,000 Mental Health Startups Can tech solutions solve the mental health problem?  There are a lot of them out there.    


[https://medium.com/what-if-ventures/approaching-1-000-mental-health-startups-in-2020-d344c822f757?source=friends\_link&sk=8a2743ed9c89fe4fbb814c360939ce42](https://medium.com/what-if-ventures/approaching-1-000-mental-health-startups-in-2020-d344c822f757?source=friends_link&sk=8a2743ed9c89fe4fbb814c360939ce42)",74.25142857142856,95.04952557142856,20.29238095238095,-37.95571428571424,-63.85714285714286,6.609523809523811,26.04761904761905,7.793537801064563,2.2730190476190475,411,4,15,2,3,59,18,21,0.114,0.716,0.17,-0.1877,0,0,0,0,0,0,50.0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,10,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3398337251741442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6667789530361821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333246848080168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6321598473228314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15005773180964227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,calidreaming811,2020/01/20,"What do you do when therapy isn’t an option? My boyfriend has been battling anxiety and depression for a long time. He has learned how to distract himself, but has never had any formal therapy. Lately, he has been struggling with his mental health and doesn’t know what to do about it. 

He currently has no heath insurance, so seeking therapy in the traditional route is unfortunately not an option. We have been struggling with money, and I think this adds to the anxiety. We moved away from home last year and are just now getting on our feet financially. He hates his bartending job, but doesn’t know what he wants to do, and doesn’t have a car or the means to find other work. 

The next step is getting a car on the road for him, and then finding a better job with benefits so he can start going to therapy. But in the meantime, what are things that he can do to help with the feelings of anxiety and depression? I suggested regular exercise, either running, biking, ju jitsu, etc. and making little, manageable improvements in his daily life. Is there a podcast, online community, audiobook, or anything like that that people would suggest? Any suggestions help!",6.6755935613682125,7.844266220657282,6.907890677397723,72.63475352112678,65.19718309859155,10.592756539235411,34.463112005365524,10.608840637214634,3.9507534540576787,927,41,156,24,14,299,128,213,0.14300000000000002,0.773,0.085,-0.8968,3,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,3,1,0,2,8,10,2,3,14,0,28,4,1,2,1,38,40,18,0,2,8,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,11,15,0,0,8,2,1,6,7,7,0,0,4,1,12,3,22,35,2,26,0,2,0,0,21,8,0,4,13,113,23,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496953872041198,0.0,0.2783710626749458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998154620699664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113960659072012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727558354251944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20894243680323765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527600424832384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133040392554185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217228919313752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674327779796055,0.0,0.0689347520827755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975371520409353,0.0,0.1289309285856796,0.0,0.0,0.16260298309085522,0.0,0.12166878950694933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24073317186820994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333211358500458,0.09887162598758677,0.13682605978891413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567425598253998,0.059258617320864786,0.12156947004499175,0.0,0.1073422710531544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809653641647471,0.0,0.0,0.13212582982976825,0.0,0.0,0.12223684589740087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12891740476334482,0.0,0.0,0.0935501929154667,0.0,0.12899862416555138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409069070688141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08585323568681591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25360777061258216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5548456809708616,0.0,0.08058301806187172,0.0777209477237498,0.0,0.0,0.07072809848387948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071542942298978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830421529782732,0.0,0.0,0.08616449829896385,0.0,0.0,0.07811001263546354
mentalhealth,massausage,2020/01/20,"Is ADD, depression,anxiety, or any undiagnosed mental condition holding me back? Or is it all laziness? I'm a 27 y/o male, and I'm currently holding a pretty stable job, live away from my parents, and do my best to keep myself physically active as well as socially active with my friends.

Now that have the good part out of the way, I want to highlight some habits and mindsets I currently have and how I feel like they prevent me from doing more.

-I'm a huge nerd. Now there's nothing wrong with that, but my whole life I've spent consuming entertainment. I'm always making lists of movies, comics, anime, music, video games, shows to consume and the majority of my free time goes into those.

-I used to be pretty creative as a kid and drew everyday. I think discovering the internet, this whole other world of overabundance in entertainment, really fcked me up. And I have no doubt discovering porn killed a lot of motivation I had for healthier activities.

-I have this habit of thinking ""Oh, I might try this and that out and turn it into a legit hobby and if I'm lucky enough, a career out of it"" I can't count the number of times I've started this only to quit within a few days. Basically things that aren't required, but challenge me, I end up quitting. And these are things my other friend does with no hesitation and things you would think I would be interested in(trailer editing, music production, writing film reviews, web designing for a blog where I could talk about my interests).

Now I've never been diagnosed with any of the above mental conditions and I think if I did, I'm not at a severe level. Since being a kid, I moved around a lot and never really fit into any group. I 've always been introverted and didn't like sports except when I did track in HS, which I actually kinda excelled at. I scored somewhat in neuroticism in the big 5 psychology test to no surprise, I've always been socially anxious and the feared talking with people and in front of the room. I feel like I've ruined dates on online dating by having doubts and not being able to keep my cool. I'm always scared of not being able to get along or impress someone and this is due to lack of inner confidence than looks, the lack of grounded confidence is what kills opportunities with other people. I have had a few bouts of depression here and there but I would say mostly triggered from life events. Although these bouts caused me to be more introspective and become sad about the things I was not achieving.

Should I seek therapy/medication? Or avoid that road and just meditate re-attempt certain activities and see where that takes me?

TLDR: Introverted guy, wants to achieve more, but laziness holds me back. Idk if that can be attributed to mental disorders, but I want to seek help or apply more self help to help me reach my potential.",6.790608644859812,7.223777114018695,7.18563960280374,73.32303884345797,64.77570093457943,10.35105140186916,31.858936915887853,10.198262852665088,3.1869918224299068,2256,81,404,49,32,737,281,535,0.12,0.695,0.18600000000000005,0.9866,4,1,0,0,0,0,66.0,0,1,1,10,17,34,2,6,24,1,38,4,0,7,4,103,65,42,2,13,19,1,2,3,2,5,3,1,1,5,27,38,0,8,7,9,2,2,12,13,1,0,10,6,46,22,67,42,20,53,0,3,2,1,21,30,0,18,23,281,73,11,0.1663139796757301,0.0,0.08114922654175964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767731084506726,0.0,0.0,0.16964881399330614,0.0,0.06361486961527643,0.09394372882068423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402735126135143,0.0,0.0,0.07812872931338807,0.12788518442133626,0.0,0.0,0.09184036196303903,0.0,0.0,0.08726813045626859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542513521057325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663940898396878,0.0,0.0,0.053629379039297015,0.0,0.07162299349622232,0.08440259424454842,0.0,0.0,0.09530511473792866,0.0,0.0727712421921813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365241069410515,0.08592339976707704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357473258693458,0.08409334530000477,0.11881474031144605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849376813780472,0.0,0.043446095012100325,0.0,0.0,0.06974813771934117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233849386280456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721513224261692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252048108005315,0.1478275068015607,0.18400177704507686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747248233368103,0.12187891443893582,0.0,0.07342914553351365,0.0,0.06983092784074274,0.0,0.0,0.14139419807611045,0.0,0.0,0.05550793644138352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236866930843196,0.0,0.2514080610714677,0.08821642502783847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838271998914328,0.0,0.0,0.12827159405754554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979137450584976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06324463796917189,0.0,0.0,0.0923359962486862,0.09005091640490527,0.0,0.11530117262418152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16920110828519858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768953893775489,0.0,0.0,0.10654499409311316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612977599624728,0.08325465368187153,0.0,0.06626535452900996,0.0,0.08675087626649176,0.09394372882068423,0.0,0.06878832131450413,0.0,0.0,0.1695361578660771,0.07045864763499132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05885894541391867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252370734299867,0.1336768770017709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22098323602826755,0.2131345654240828,0.0,0.0,0.09697901901051392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645813753173681,0.09045092581284578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182093975739404,0.0,0.0,0.1471444413890623,0.06600614789402581,0.0,0.0,0.07476812061724171,0.0,0.0,0.18568361889332888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17721701907067025,0.09091911418474256,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anxiousbojack,2020/01/20,"Making up far-fetched scenarios when something good happens to me Hello everybody!  First post on this sub and I'm happy to meet you all!

Not sure if this is the right sub for this though.

Just wanted to get something off my chest: I (27M) noticed I unwillingly ""dive"" into various scenarios when something positive happens to me.  Say for example I add or talk to a girl I like on Facebook.  I feel very happy doing that which makes sense.  However, what I don't like is that my mind jumps to imagining how I would react if I met her parents or how might I take a flight to go visit her (for example if she lives far away).  Or say I go to the gym and do a 10k run and the time is better than last time - which is great!  But then my mind jumps again to a scenario in which I've trained hard for like a year and I'm like super fit and can *always* beat this time - so the first time I'm slower (because tired or whatever reason), the whole thing collapses and I don't feel motivated at all.

I'm thinking It's like my mind extrapolates from a little good thing into this grandiose fantasy and the scary thing is I noticed I need to consciously re-focus else I can end up indulging in the fantasy for a long time.

What I noticed happening in the past is that these fantasies almost never come true - I've even said to myself once that anything that I fantasize about won't come true, so if I want something, I shouldn't fantasize about it.  Still, I don't always notice and what happens is I spend a lot of time thinking about ""how things great would be if X"" but as soon as X doesn't happen then I feel demoralized and depressed.

Searching online this seems like a fairly common occurrence, but I thought I share it here as well.

All the best everybody & thanks for reading!",3.398801452784504,4.9631194491525426,4.407380952380954,85.98216101694916,73.43502824858756,7.656012913640032,26.48466505246166,8.306716005460428,1.6772190476190478,1391,49,283,23,28,452,180,354,0.061,0.79,0.149,0.9813,3,0,4,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,0,7,18,22,0,0,18,0,21,2,1,8,7,64,51,34,0,11,14,1,4,6,0,5,1,3,0,1,25,14,0,0,11,5,1,8,8,1,1,2,3,7,34,21,38,42,7,47,0,1,0,0,15,16,0,13,28,185,59,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804411667830147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368577175405705,0.08703998352571443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610661538853953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07547481424688765,0.0,0.0,0.048969807605653934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430376372102813,0.07104736675822372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839827904319632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919006846060533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710730553403599,0.0,0.07115054941793991,0.0,0.0,0.053058708253616284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12185523184036297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666117964152355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041970296709139016,0.0,0.09130936326570467,0.13475779741195765,0.0,0.17713322772122872,0.0,0.0,0.35518781567609475,0.17103039537224238,0.07196193715674652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548152376852619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23547774317416675,0.08051404093706012,0.07093486823802653,0.07109153311807763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829562524033897,0.0,0.0,0.1072448311641379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521984615663869,0.2433380847420225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059565362058916486,0.06195720076165665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3658352980239802,0.0,0.08555124828801185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919948175807205,0.0,0.07668624374147921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693611101752572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035401140096263,0.0,0.0,0.0825949552939803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860332165642362,0.07641438690744642,0.1277668945436126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07313148367573617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24737483173041105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06415345646589461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571221599383661,0.0,0.06039987133044222,0.06456803758027985,0.0,0.07395916339612467,0.0,0.0,0.21347676888495845,0.1029473528901822,0.07892604971189231,0.06377485104177455,0.2810543641240175,0.0923301297084468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06628253776258546,0.0947641111355646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222836035819427,0.0,0.0,0.08968811324480593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413148285990775,0.0,0.0,0.0517313495945858
mentalhealth,fakeikeaplant,2020/01/20,"I'm stuck in a bad routine I need to pull myself together so I can study for my important exams but I'm stuck in a horrible routine. This routine starts when someone says something mean or I just begin to doubt myself, from here I spend a few weeks unmotivated and then a week or two really motivated and then I become unmotivated and the cycle continues.  This routine has left me mentally drained . It really sucks and I want to get out of it because if I fail these exams I feel it will just get worse from here",3.122843137254904,5.165603245098044,5.141764705882356,78.38460784313726,75.37254901960785,8.454901960784316,27.01960784313725,9.150863307647796,2.4509137254901967,409,16,78,10,9,141,66,102,0.308,0.627,0.065,-0.9828,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,6,4,1,1,5,0,3,0,0,1,0,17,16,12,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,4,0,1,2,2,12,0,10,13,1,13,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,4,8,54,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20512762177793475,0.14976065846342707,0.2713277551651256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422021275220292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567091674805909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26692564161502497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676111298963724,0.0,0.0,0.2475817218156243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18216424118696814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31477025409590803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19536991456823136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081588779284922,0.18913193403555703,0.0,0.0,0.1738894010127305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399879096641001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449049565055364,0.0,0.3941299077640119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503629087429952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AshleyRhy17,2020/01/20,"I Don't Know What to do Anymore I was first diagnosed with depression and anxiety when I was 14. As I got older, I started to think there was more going on. In the past 2-3 years, I've seen a lot of doctors, therapists, etc. I have been temporarily diagnosed with bipolar disorder, PTSD, borderline personality disorder, social anxiety disorder, and avoidant personality disorder. But then within a few months, the diagnosis goes right back to depression and anxiety. They increased it to depression with psychotic features. But now my current therapist doesn't agree with that. I'm at my breaking point and planning my death in detail. I called a suicide hotline and she said it sounds like borderline personality disorder. I just feel hopeless because all of these things are very different and require different treatment. For example, taking medication for depression if I actually have bipolar disorder can be very dangerous. It's like no one knows what to do with me or how to help me. Nothing they try seems to work. Then I have family members who don't think I have any kind of mental illness. So every time I come home with a new diagnosis, my mom especially accuses me of lying to the doctor so I can get a diagnosis and people will feel sorry for me or something along those lines. It's frustrating when I know that something isn't right. I have literal hallucinations, panic attacks, voices, visions, etc. None of those things are typical. It's just a frustrating situation. It seems hopeless. Am I really that strange that even professionals with years of education and training and research on mental illness can't even agree on what's going on with me?",6.241371237458192,8.353083304347827,7.239197324414714,66.31558528428096,67.12709030100335,11.220066889632108,37.080267558528426,11.119845054232373,5.026426086956524,1344,72,211,45,23,450,163,299,0.266,0.698,0.036000000000000004,-0.997,3,1,2,0,0,3,37.0,0,0,2,4,12,15,4,2,9,0,23,9,0,1,1,40,42,22,2,1,7,1,2,2,0,1,9,3,1,3,19,19,0,2,9,0,0,4,7,12,0,2,7,6,28,3,35,33,8,32,0,6,1,0,12,11,0,6,18,152,47,6,0.0,0.0,0.0785641731188728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05474818578060327,0.0,0.1847651484447799,0.0,0.07984228104339974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09158944749143363,0.0,0.0619056656260705,0.0,0.049076916144710936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220764687617098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935049438902682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773656139499217,0.16342780599389534,0.0,0.1682274035342428,0.553614706077195,0.1648066538095014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17957535360019866,0.10634952036890427,0.0,0.06783144375107379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589575663794876,0.0,0.08141450534830279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848004496478731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04206209566412993,0.0,0.091509078416321,0.0,0.06438958455553312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053962800622397236,0.0,0.0807560661597871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383667019230244,0.13273523774052154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866426287783411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844500390856624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110331797266435,0.16226621230402535,0.0,0.0,0.09428997081854316,0.0642606999538547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775510683561743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724957620938605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05455428946003429,0.0,0.0,0.09445876577770253,0.0,0.0,0.07685397467477313,0.05581409504989971,0.21088938317334013,0.0,0.0,0.0761060616943044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410951802084813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051575472235542964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750674665882115,0.07658152322561422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14658287901780592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049434043132586,0.0,0.08206774496886171,0.0,0.12395794946663892,0.0,0.09012209009300767,0.05698396120527115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806266096549754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605319801193828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18695193523475856,0.10697184650773796,0.1031725230737502,0.0,0.0,0.04694484940358409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054659632383925835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13285502666575585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058610766834103524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368899655685347
mentalhealth,repeat_as_question,2020/01/20,"Hi all, I do an introduction to mindfulness for colleagues at my job and was asked to record it along with some guided meditations I started in a new post about 18 months ago and started a mindfulness group - primarily to have other people to practice with but it's also nice to share the practice. Since then I've been asked to do a 'mindfulness taster' at several events - some couldn't attend and asked me to record it along with guided meditations. I'm sharing it here in case you find it useful as well- any feedback or ideas are very welcome:

[https://anchor.fm/shaun-donaghy](https://anchor.fm/shaun-donaghy)",8.633142857142857,10.393996885714287,6.892380952380954,72.36428571428574,61.0952380952381,9.428571428571429,31.190476190476193,9.606745405546679,2.8689047619047616,503,17,81,9,7,148,72,105,0.0,0.81,0.19,0.9688,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,5,0,7,0,0,1,1,20,14,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,5,5,19,11,3,13,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,3,7,54,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872082892691428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318965495544095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176306057768325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5021747855858674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636523817130531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021305043988105,0.0,0.0,0.1776837591752313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5423813856762836,0.0,0.14291942992598133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17293175378980005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12413370305792483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17148451935285489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20228038747864924,0.0,0.148115563052252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25347110306080817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546454213131858,0.0,0.147738545390151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099131468769265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_like_maps,2020/01/20,"Therapist made me feel really shitty, not really sure where to go from here Hey /r/mentalhealth

So I'm at a bit of a weird spot in my mental health and I'm not really sure where I want to go from here. I've been seeing a therapist recently, starting in mid December. In my first appointment I told her why I wanted to go to therapy. I have a lot of issues with anxiety and depression, many of which I think stem from a difficult period when I was growing up. Briefly, I had an illness that kept me out of school for a couple of months, and a combination of, depression, a lack of support from my family, and no friends, I ended up out of school and feeling totally isolated for about four years. I really wanted to work on the feelings that that's created for me and hopefully become healthier and more able to deal with my mental health issues.

I've been having kind of a rough time recently. I graduated from university about 8 months ago and haven't done very much with my time since. In December in particular, I was feeling very depressed. I wasn't working or really doing anything, and the holidays are a particularly difficult time of year for me. Since the new year though, I've been doing a lot better. I've started applying to graduate school, and I have another (albeit very temporary) job.

I mentioned this to my therapist and she asked me what I thought had spurred this improvement. I told her that I was feeling a bit better about myself and that the deadlines were imminent so I got off my butt and started applying. She said that there had to be something internal that spurred that and I just kinda said I don't know and she spent about half an hour asking me what I thought it was that had caused me to do this. I found this very frustrating. I just kind of repeatedly told her I don't know and she kept asking and being unsatisfied with my answers. I also didn't really like that line of conversation or find it helpful. Like I'm happy that I'm in the mindset of doing things and I don't think analyzing that helps anything. I want to work on the bigger issues that I face and she knows that.

Eventually she seemed to realize that I was getting frustrated and said that I should think about what I want from these sessions and whether I want to continue them. I found this incredibly hurtful and frustrating and left immediately. She tried to apologize as I was leaving. I don't really know what to do now. I feel SIGNIFICANTLY less happy and motivated to do things than I was feeling before therapy. I still have issues I want to deal with but I really don't want to go back to her. The worst part is, she was actually the second therapist I've met with; the first one kind of rubbed me the wrong way in the first session and I asked to see someone else, and I'm starting to just feel like I'm the problem and there's no point. Does anyone have any advice?",4.3998708206686965,5.859325750000004,5.715227963525837,78.00500000000002,70.75531914893618,9.76859169199595,29.03140830800405,10.07000556051586,2.970008915906788,2289,88,440,62,42,768,229,564,0.106,0.8140000000000001,0.08,-0.9686,1,0,1,0,0,1,48.0,0,0,1,9,22,28,3,0,26,0,41,5,2,3,3,90,104,37,0,12,9,0,10,3,1,1,3,3,0,0,31,35,0,2,24,1,1,5,12,13,0,7,35,15,71,15,73,66,11,55,0,4,2,1,33,21,1,7,31,310,102,12,0.056329096445776425,0.0,0.054969072561228426,0.0,0.0,0.05504414111834959,0.049932345295984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0450463580765454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038305717190150884,0.059065969047792426,0.043091604601501965,0.0,0.0,0.039386613951614864,0.0,0.09270809364961327,0.0,0.21064040523088384,0.0,0.0,0.04331359817918283,0.0,0.0,0.06221106147201371,0.0479319122413646,0.0,0.0,0.09963701654164124,0.12299356842143225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578654986135488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06232707382071408,0.0,0.0,0.11614565006654134,0.145548504686741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0492939718947813,0.057644222708593575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047055732088661616,0.0,0.0498908600893471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0531020589678752,0.0,0.22785346930367256,0.040241517755948336,0.0,0.0,0.05148377366381494,0.1437405019831355,0.0,0.1235238936199254,0.043519720183641634,0.0,0.029429627995199638,0.0,0.12805249445868694,0.0,0.04505152418857705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199267412036426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197503909091187,0.0,0.0,0.07551241196242135,0.0,0.0,0.05594750266468661,0.05547281336668077,0.0,0.060301462771286965,0.0,0.0,0.23517176772274598,0.055897936500265234,0.0,0.0,0.17597425738012662,0.12382799309384615,0.0,0.0,0.059644379856622215,0.06120172810504789,0.0,0.0,0.08255865369252773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577796690129592,0.0,0.05329995303756687,0.0,0.057108862594731816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353296094492953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992269474418284,0.0,0.041408367196551416,0.0,0.0,0.05440299235614796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03817005356013234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060998922220399224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05324920331425959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05389933788796498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28868689257690583,0.0,0.11123637429474943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16074560985967842,0.0,0.0,0.17102415861017872,0.08977399382916385,0.05127989383132673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319202133753524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04772746062367929,0.04336489043461929,0.0,0.0,0.1594800975543554,0.0,0.044984489184857236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06392159111667381,0.1061790135453405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288344618303569,0.2616096901531028,0.0748450974440397,0.10828023159968103,0.055343051259531435,0.08943802111363237,0.0985378473723792,0.0,0.0,0.1614745967530073,0.0,0.03824375894768151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18590961531190744,0.2657948841622695,0.044711414855035575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05082824811183072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302475926647805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06158702427375416,0.0,0.10882227386732572
mentalhealth,punkassunicorn,2020/01/20,"All my friends are leaving All my friends are moving out today. Dont get me wrong I'm happy for them, I'm proud of them moving up in their lives, but also we've been together for the past like 5 years. We've been through a lot together. They have helped me through so much. 

And sure they're just an hour away, and I know even though we're physically separated and probably won't talk as much I can still rely on them for anything. But it feels so weird to see them go after everything.

It's like they're taking a part of our lives with them, and I know we can never go back to that. No more walking a door down when I'm sad and dont want to think. No more building blanket forts at the foot of their beds when I'm too scared to sleep. No one to turn to when I'm bored out of my mind. I'm alone now. And I genuinely dont know what I'm going to do without them.

So Im at work, trying not to cry. And failing. Because I'm happy and sad and scared all at the same time, and now I dont have anyone to go to about it anymore",1.3744591937069828,2.4741995530973457,3.090737463126846,95.26633235004921,77.80530973451326,6.261160275319568,21.40511307767945,6.691623216298621,0.12101455260570272,793,20,197,7,18,264,121,226,0.158,0.7240000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.8932,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,2,0,9,3,16,16,0,2,7,0,14,2,2,0,5,33,36,21,0,1,5,0,1,2,2,1,0,0,2,0,5,14,0,0,5,0,0,7,11,8,0,1,2,2,21,8,34,33,10,31,0,3,1,0,15,10,0,1,16,124,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435099846013845,0.0,0.08829447912775899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094966080036053,0.07720092615599655,0.0,0.09085765408393988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10373340889695844,0.08489813058541686,0.0,0.0673046383306887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127970882788718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5175966922866057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292446803264266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922898640689658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582638710613012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706042925321941,0.0,0.0576844341188335,0.0,0.25099317196803433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23506604307660015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400519560952337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087311687581845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926126291681392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18203460754382744,0.0,0.0,0.11690777406222068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10788106055668363,0.0,0.19498731505100747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386625312856152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148217365233136,0.0,0.0,0.23469576204890666,0.1623274497324636,0.0,0.08515465330853604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481637009686108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119562785867236,0.10539841082331276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904017148857772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210784460173305,0.0,0.08798211845334332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048928881244807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817321113187496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405969645042697,0.0,0.08301424273200925,0.08874301594277256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074598300622595,0.10847682460805806,0.0,0.064380697867818,0.0,0.10465534578165392,0.0,0.0,0.07496083857512309,0.12009388806026006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512241459135291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643086849535832,0.0,0.08037946908525942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120715513117388,0.0,0.07110013179672002
mentalhealth,bigrob37188,2020/01/20,I'm tired 49 years may be enough I am so tired of fighting my mind. I am tired fighting to keep my anger in. I know I am crazy and I take medicine for it. I just want to lay down,-2.0907142857142844,-0.4235781666666636,0.04790476190476234,109.68042857142858,92.57142857142857,3.3600000000000003,15.542857142857144,3.1291,-1.6583771428571428,135,3,40,0,5,44,29,42,0.418,0.555,0.027000000000000003,-0.9585,0,0,0,0,4,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,7,10,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,0,6,8,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,24,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551762909461369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21950990642650828,0.0,0.0,0.13572307357501615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493597804462841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856836179578336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8515345556111934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456637458045478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590345135341842
mentalhealth,thr0waway7765,2020/01/20,"Idk if this fits here but here goes nothing I was emotionally abused by an S/o my freshman year (I'm a junior now) and I didn't have to deal with all the emotional trauma that came with it up until this year because the abuser completely disappeared from my life. While it was happening I went from being the happiest kid you've ever met to severely depressed and highly suicidal. I stopped talking to all my friends and family, stopped sleeping unless I passed out, and didn't eat unless I was forced to.  I should've been hospitalized and removed from the situation but no one knew what was happening. 

Now the abuser is back in school with me and we dont interact much, if at all, but I'm so scared of them and seeing them or hearing about them just makes me uneasy and now that I'm just kinda being forced to deal with it, I Don't know how. Like I'm learning things that trigger me and stuff but like I'm almost back into the mindset I had during the relationship. I'm having panic attacks, nightmares, major depressive episodes, not eating, not talking to people. 

I feel bad talking to those around me because they have never experienced anything like that but I need to talk to someone. I feel as if I'm just overreacting but I Don't know. If someone knows something that could help me, please tell me. Sorry for making a huge post.",6.525057471264365,6.536329398467437,6.8389118773946365,77.02227586206898,65.36015325670498,9.56536398467433,32.72567049808429,9.21078282632365,2.7891459003831414,1067,40,199,17,15,346,148,261,0.251,0.648,0.10099999999999999,-0.9938,0,0,1,0,3,0,24.0,1,0,4,0,15,11,1,2,10,0,18,4,1,4,5,58,41,27,1,6,18,0,2,3,1,0,1,1,0,1,14,18,2,2,7,0,0,5,9,7,0,1,12,5,27,4,30,26,5,28,0,2,1,0,19,9,0,7,16,142,41,3,0.0,0.3613635656219423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180122421648123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366032772143225,0.090501992662312,0.0,0.11565681042416302,0.0,0.15634578064608848,0.08488470449420422,0.12394614755771427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11627586256777588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659215571306042,0.0,0.0,0.08116996392696023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20962103232776744,0.17512509961252934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914876446243433,0.0,0.0,0.20805410634776872,0.0,0.2287153152327102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196037861513133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583921923204794,0.0,0.102808153873036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854490173574345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980124311294435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145820566384202,0.0,0.06814284366247804,0.10741297896398623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16761466138768394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180787609604046,0.14900282709428606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13572223700892858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473430708576212,0.07538213356417935,0.07840909249335691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754878794122583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888976062983931,0.0,0.0,0.11928011212726178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048061088900258,0.0,0.0,0.11159590000016953,0.0,0.0,0.09736544857891108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091484605355343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178281308511204,0.10288880286753292,0.08101257882613158,0.0,0.0,0.11485072086914733,0.0,0.0,0.1142739372535732,0.10173683444674464,0.0,0.17227816212809888,0.0782654631876229,0.0,0.11380386905261347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999033315711584,0.0,0.0,0.1163802866659472,0.11120327465329996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32685280603444344,0.08885830513367635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754065512528215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424300361973847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093581134408894
mentalhealth,Guardian_Zenon,2020/01/20,"Motivated but depressed. Hello Reddit.

I'm a 22 M, currently posted in CFB Gagetown NB, CA. Im a very motivated person when it comes to my duties and activities. But recently I've fallen back into my depression. I am motivated as hell but I'm depressed emotionally and dont know how to get out of this mental rut. Can anyone help? Or at least relate? I feel kinda alone here. And mentioning it to the CAF only makes you look like a mental case who should be taken out of the CAF.",1.4301988636363632,3.899651697916666,4.530303030303031,78.12681818181822,84.10416666666666,7.240909090909091,21.227272727272727,8.296473431620573,1.6351375,377,12,70,9,11,136,71,96,0.21899999999999997,0.632,0.149,-0.8845,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,3,4,5,1,0,5,0,5,0,0,5,0,21,14,10,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,7,0,1,5,0,0,2,1,4,0,0,1,2,5,1,11,11,1,12,1,3,1,0,6,5,1,2,5,42,9,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113117616324557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426613140712318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688514988839725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17575229338096274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5271877639753789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391196192754308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295043483986306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316282641890526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659635295332497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675585228627593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203855488874312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212860437351213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996779095066541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17133236552322606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619045815207326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4112250273328564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15517269732733088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17814962036413762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954026892331828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20145330782817528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834469479564448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnhappyAmerican_,2020/01/20,"Suicide becomes more and more irresistible every passing day My life has no direction. 

I'm in my mid-twenties currently living with my mother and sister. It's a toxic environment. My sister is emotionally abusive and impulsive. She outwardly expresses her anger; yelling, screaming, slamming doors, and occasionally, throwing objects around. She loves to be get the last say whenever she gets into an argument with others. She brings me anxiety. My mother is close-minded and cannot sympathize that I have depression. Even though I live in the same house, I do not talk to either of them or go out my room whenever they are out of theirs.

In fact, I haven't been outside of my house for several months now. I can't find a reason to be outside. I no longer contact friends. I just sit in front of my computer applying to jobs.

I'm still unemployed. My last position came to an end early last year. I had to leave because of a medical condition. It's been over 6 months since I started applying for entry- to mid-level developer positions. The career switch has been hard. The majority of recruiters want to see experience and dismiss my application because I do not have any professional development experience. And if it wasn't the lack of professional development experience, then it was either my incomplete college degree or gaps in my resume that probably solidified my rejection.

I'm burnt out of applying to jobs. Whether I apply to 100 jobs or no jobs, the result is still the same. I experience disinterest, lack of concentration, and unwillingness to work on new coding projects daily. I experience constant fatigue and loss of appetite, which adds to my lack of productivity. 

On top of that I'm carrying the weight of my past regrets and failures. I couldn't finish my college degree because I was unable to pay for tuition costs. I also have gaps in my resume because of my major depression. I have student loan debt that I cannot pay. My medical condition is persistent, but I cannot go to the doctor because I cannot pay for it.

The only thing I got going for me is the completion of a coding bootcamp. In hindsight, however, I wish I never attended the bootcamp. All it did was exchange up my hope of moving up the economic ladder with debt.

I've been fucked by life. Suicide is the escape out of this world.",5.299802550390787,7.347343645687647,6.6595536816125085,69.79032599753188,69.41958041958043,10.082023858494447,34.062868504044964,10.328600350310266,4.134577348142053,1860,92,304,54,34,630,217,429,0.129,0.8170000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.9778,10,0,0,0,1,2,53.0,0,0,3,4,8,12,2,0,20,0,34,9,0,2,3,49,53,19,2,9,11,4,2,0,1,0,6,3,2,0,14,21,1,0,2,0,9,10,14,9,0,0,12,6,53,3,58,38,12,53,0,6,1,2,18,22,1,6,20,219,67,19,0.0,0.10659361507543587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194484385868524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117917096555011,0.0,0.06882285043792416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008777436764895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742086336259007,0.0993590890584676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289580120604053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943264149769805,0.09722002308595276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801987420585623,0.0,0.15497315640565915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092082817959275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119832736241467,0.07968213840959767,0.0,0.0,0.059420923232296335,0.0,0.0757992513344122,0.0,0.0,0.4400143442636553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222622683958197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950660624029492,0.08317103775472523,0.09400582339357924,0.0,0.15338726224921345,0.0,0.07195309480591704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059081881524942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935537777892083,0.0,0.20761467504774825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3571048568854869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200000372258321,0.0,0.09525976747201403,0.0,0.0,0.12708964320947286,0.0,0.0,0.15888119024373534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119677358045732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18126020745260688,0.0,0.0,0.0908388344965299,0.0,0.14361814159824293,0.09561837909747174,0.0,0.0,0.06938642479852404,0.08688859560760473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842230890791183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858816121296174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699730532714916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924988311897708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154364554085674,0.0,0.0,0.07169032352887038,0.0,0.0,0.1016346529877072,0.0,0.07441983892028789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367757132340804,0.0,0.14369206251780825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19681384922888984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231032436709088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05976863701222515,0.0,0.08838999092366925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530635889781523,0.0,0.0,0.10955292903148628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034551172045515,0.0,0.0,0.06549546936468552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05793440236558078
mentalhealth,Alexanicole14,2020/01/20,"Part time student my last semester of college and feeling like a failure So here’s the situation. I was originally basically finished with my undergrad and I’m an education major and I was supposed to student teach this semester. However, there was a class I needed to pass which I did not, so I have to retake it in order to student teach. Therefore, I had to postpone student teaching until fall. I’m the meantime, I will be taking only 6.5 credits which makes me a part-time student. I already told my job I wasn’t coming back so it’s too late to get it back. I am hoping to work a job or two so I can make some money and feel productive. I have to be busy in order to feel productive and feel good about myself. The problem is that I finished a lot of my credits earlier on and it’s just this one class along with another I have to take holding me back. I’m on track and everything and education majors graduate in 4.5 years, so why am I feeling like a failure? I always tend to beat myself up about it. I have generalized anxiety disorder and social anxiety which makes situations like these worse.",2.450967472894078,4.840614880733948,4.6754628857381135,79.19103419516264,79.09174311926606,7.633361134278567,29.175145954962467,8.575989854853784,2.655836697247707,876,42,160,20,22,303,115,218,0.096,0.8029999999999999,0.1,-0.0516,3,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,14,8,0,0,10,0,17,0,0,5,0,33,36,16,0,3,3,0,5,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,12,13,0,1,5,0,3,3,2,1,0,2,7,5,25,7,25,26,5,22,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,4,14,117,37,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458575729554186,0.0,0.10997956528348424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859622690196166,0.2022258808312092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049015217032208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385641392829195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148314295191795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878969436235524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33415636407381555,0.18885062297953392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905559097765207,0.0,0.0,0.110861490968482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13127885479435505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623250990523368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773965581635052,0.14909831249478794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19372098831785275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236982180144822,0.0,0.0,0.26468201714161715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980055325146324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956469333127537,0.10052447406176412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862636675948868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647290790643673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971387925374929,0.0,0.13473500403502084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19875717527579975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770718688105203,0.0,0.0,0.1262981612552245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291150377837505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926670334717525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622442908459183,0.0,0.13469685396754424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08511588429032406
mentalhealth,emihuhisag,2020/01/20,"Do they make incoming patients at mental health facilities strip naked and then have the staff take pictures? After waiting 24 hours in the waiting room, a mental health hospital finally gave a room to my gf after she admitted herself thanks in part to thE suicide hotline. After she got her room and I left she then called me sounding terrified and that’s when she told me what they staff did to her. On one hand, my gf did cut her legs and stomach with a razor over the weekend and told the counselor about it. But on the other hand, this hospital is giving me terrible feelings. And I really need to know if taking naked pictures is a standard procedure for somebody with suicidal tendencies?",6.146666666666667,7.614321496124033,6.282170542635658,75.55178294573646,66.59689922480621,9.454263565891472,34.488372093023266,9.725611199111238,3.5782000000000007,559,26,93,12,9,178,83,129,0.129,0.78,0.091,-0.8156,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,2,0,2,3,1,0,10,0,6,6,4,1,0,18,21,11,2,2,2,0,3,0,2,0,2,1,3,0,5,8,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,6,4,17,1,17,15,1,19,0,0,0,0,18,10,0,1,9,68,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18744004146256285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281580751925972,0.0,0.0,0.2010861122920878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760919483177488,0.0,0.0,0.14681342743000647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3902412990925734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18077421366383986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088233642101843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19944354002610346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253083585044305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3699800045128868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611086933677632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243881642026848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987826383681792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759622153938135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4015798882442189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27603555860147044,0.0,0.0,0.16900167609675953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508077979479043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throawa12223333444,2020/01/20,"Need to get this off my chest I want to go to the gym at least twice a week. It's 10 minutes by bike and not too hard to reach.

I don't go there twice a week. I feel myself getting less strong, I see myself losing muscles and losing shape and it hurts me.

I feel less good about myself than before, and it makes me feel bad about myself (I do more things that make me do so).

I want to go more often, but how do I find that mindset?

I also lack it in studying nowadays. Get distracted too easily. Don't feel the drive to study. I like my studies, and it's challenging but I do like it. I just can't find myself.

Is there a way to get out of this rut?",-0.2448356807511729,1.6118501971831023,1.813267605633804,98.92351643192491,85.76056338028171,4.631737089201878,15.804694835680753,5.6839178017228535,-0.8707648826291079,496,9,122,3,15,165,77,142,0.099,0.758,0.14300000000000002,0.4965,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,4,11,10,0,1,5,0,8,1,1,3,0,24,25,10,0,4,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,11,6,0,0,6,2,0,4,4,5,0,2,0,6,22,5,16,25,6,12,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,1,4,87,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840698052352568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450931559770286,0.0,0.0,0.14727297671374062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35004506506988303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31637246441351863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616954730790597,0.0,0.2950853275932285,0.1451660135494012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15504004584465653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18527898235731668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16911014136819205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3872504139706823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23105608599825694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12833196032858854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791733611758716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498248012209805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20416671250641347,0.1373778522673141,0.2776585753488696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,timfluencer,2020/01/20,"Are you a survivor of mental illness? [REPORTSURVIVAL] Hey yall,

\#ReportSurvival is an initiative to share real life survivor stories, give the hopeless hope, and help end suicide contagion. Right now we're looking for people who have stories that they'd be willing to share. If you or someone you know does, we'd love to hear from ya! Also, if you have feedback on the proposal below we welcome your comments.

All the best,

The #ReportSurvival team

​

**WHAT PROBLEM ARE WE TRYING TO SOLVE?**

***The news is killing people.***

When we lost Robin Williams the suicide rate increased by 10%. Marilyn Monroe: 12%. When Kate Spade and Anthony Bourdain committed suicide, the hotline got 25% more calls. It's called *suicide contagion,* and it’s the proven link between mass media coverage of suicide and an increase in suicide rates.

Think about it. If a celebrity with more resources and success couldn’t beat it, how can anyone? It makes you feel hopeless. And hopelessness can be deadly.

With suicide rates increasing across the world, we have to do something now more than ever. Something unprecedented. We have to tell the other side of the story. Where people survive and thrive. We have to #ReportSurvival.

***#ReportSurvival***\*\*?\*\*

\#ReportSurvival is a campaign guiding news organizations to report suicide more responsibly. Whether it’s Buzzfeed, the local news, or CNN, we’ll create a media landscape where a story of someone who survived suicide follows every report of someone who didn't.

**WHY SURVIVOR STORIES?**

***Why survivor stories?***

For every person that dies by suicide, another 280 people survive. Many of whom go on to live happy, fulfilling lives. These stories of survival and perseverance hold extraordinary power. That's why they're an effective way to end suicide contagion. But don't take it from us, take it from them:

“Portraying suicide survivors rather than focusing on completed cases in the media is more effective in reducing suicide contagion.”

* *Madelyn Gould, professor of clinical epidemiology at Columbia University and expert in youth suicide*

“Our best answers as to why suicides happen and what we can do to prevent them are not found by focusing on the one person who died by suicide, but by focusing on the living—the other 280 who survived.”

* *John Draper, Ph.D., executive director of the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline*

“It turns out that, although suicide can be contagious, resilience can also be contagious. And when we look at media reports that talk about people who thought about suicide but instead got help and got better, that actually rates across the population, the number of deaths that happen in a specific area, go down. And we really really want to encourage people to report in that kind of way.”

* *Mark Sinyor, M.D., Clinical Researcher and Professor at the University of Toronto*

“Hearing stories from people who have survived suicide attempts is an important step in suicide prevention.”

* *Professor Patrick McGorry, former Australian of the Year for his services to youth mental health*

“Their stories are not only enlightening professionals who create policies or study the subject, but they are also transmitting all important hope to those at risk.""

* *Center for Suicide Prevention*

""People see stories all the time about those surviving breast cancer, heart disease, and stroke, and we know what that recovery looks like—it helps people who are experiencing it or someone whose mom just got diagnosed. So many people go through their suicidal crisis feeling completely isolated and alone because they think they're the only ones. But they're not. There are millions of healing and recovery stories—they just haven't been shared.""

* *Shelby Rowe, a youth suicide prevention program manager for the Oklahoma Department of Mental Health and Substance Abuse Services*

***Don’t survivor stories already exist?***

When was the last time you saw an uplifting news story about someone who overcame suicide? Unfortunately, it’s human nature to take an interest in conflict, drama, and tragedy. As a result, the few survivor stories that are independently produced are unpromoted and low quality.

Of the content that does exist, ours will be different in several crucial ways:

1. ***Relevance*** \- Instead of one or two, we’ll feature 20 unique stories. This ensures every sufferer, no matter their experience, has something they can relate to.
2. ***Quality*** \- We’ve worked with award-winning production companies, many of whom are interested in pro-bono work. That means we’ll have the best equipment, crews, and directors to deliver quality films that distinguish our stories and engage our viewers.
3. ***Compelling Content*** \- We’ve learned storytelling at some of the world’s most renown advertising agencies and news organizations. Given our experience, we’re confident we can create films that are enthralling, concise, and effective.
4. ***Understanding*** *–* We understand these issues because we’ve been victims of them. Whether it’s suicide, suicide contagion, or depression, the videos we’re creating are films we wish existed when we felt lost and hopeless.
5. ***Casting*** \- Finding the right people is essential. Without a good story, we don’t have a film worth making. That’s why we won’t proceed until we’re completely satisfied.
6. ***Link to Treatment*** \- This is about more than hope. It’s about action and lasting change. That’s why we’re putting emphasis on how suicide survivors got through it, giving concrete examples of how others can too. Each film will link to treatment options and affordable resources to help people take the next step and get the help they so desperately need.

**HOW WILL THIS WORK?**

For this to work, we need news organizations to see these survivor stories and make a commitment to #ReportSurvival. Here’s why it will happen:

1. ***It’s nothing new:*** Media guidelines for how to report suicide already exist. The most effective being the suicide prevention hotline. Problem is, suicide contagion is only getting worse. This makes #ReportSurvival a simple, yet essential evolution of these guidelines.
2. ***We made it simple:*** We'll make the survivor films ourselves. All they’ll have to do is link to the film. That's one line of text alongside the suicide prevention hotline number. It’s that easy.
3. ***Broadcast quality:*** Our films will be as compelling and well produced as any broadcast segment.
4. ***Variety:*** With 20 different films, news outlets won’t have to worry about covering the same story.
5. ***Pre-launch partnership:*** We’ll partner with a news organization beforehand. When we launch they'll pledge to #ReportSurvival, which ensures others will follow.
6. ***PR:*** A well-executed PR plan is essential. In the absence of one, our survivor stories will get lost in a clutter of internet content. Our experience pitching blogs and acquiring earned media will ensure people and news organizations won’t miss our efforts.
7. ***Legitimacy:*** Along the way, we'll get endorsements from mental health organizations like NAMI and influencers like Michael Phelps.
8. ***They already care:*** Unlike the rest of the world, reporters are well aware of suicide contagion. #ReportSurvival is a chance for them to help end a life or death issue they’re painfully aware of.

With that, let’s go over how this works executionally.

1. ***Pre-Launch: The Stories***

***Casting***

First things first. We’ll partner with a casting agency to help us find the most moving survivor stories. At the same time, we’ll tap into our own networks to cast an even wider net.

***Production***

To ensure viewers have a story they can relate to, we'll produce 20 films. Each will represent a different gender, sexuality, race, age, trauma, or treatment. That means 300 million people who’re suffering from depression will finally have access to stories they can relate to.

***Partnerships***

The more help we can get the better. Whether it’s non-profits with funding, individuals with feedback, or production partners with time and equipment, we’ll take whatever we can get.

2) ***Pre-Launch: #ReportSurvival***

***Influencers***

Although it’s not essential, influencers have helped spark some of the most successful social movements in the digital age. Movements like #MeToo, Obama’s “Change” campaign, and the Ice Bucket Challenge dominated the internet because of influencer support.

Given this issue's importance, our connections, and how unaware people are, we believe we can recruit some of the world’s most influential people. Celebrities with their own survivor stories in all areas of life. Oprah, Michael Phelps, Ted Turner, Prince Harry, and J.K. Rowling are just a few examples of influencers who are just as passionate as we are.

***Bring on the News***

As proven with the existing suicide guidelines when one news organization commits to change, the rest join. Doesn’t matter if it’s Fox News or MSNBC, they all want to help end suicide contagion. So as we previously mentioned, we’ll partner with an organization beforehand.

3) ***Launch***

***Wait for it***

Every high profile suicide has lead to record-breaking global awareness, but very little action or change. By launching our campaign in reaction to the next widely publicized high profile suicide, we’ll turn awareness into action.

**WHO ARE WE?**

***I’m Tim***

I spent the last 6 years working at Ogilvy & Mather. While there, I executed campaigns for American Express, British Airways, Coke Zero, ThinkPad, and Qualcomm.

I know what it's like to feel hopeless. I know suicide contagion exists because I was almost a victim of it. And I know how discouraging it is to see countless stories of people who gave up, but none of the people who beat it.

That’s why this isn’t something I *want* to do. This is something I *will do*.

***The Agency***

My digital media company GUSH specializes in social media campaigns and PR-worthy executions. Part of our business is applying our digital, social, and PR skills to end the mental health crisis.

**DO YOU HAVE A STORY?**

We'd love to hear it and potentially feature it to help launch this initi1ative.",3.449329741009952,6.081978064650063,3.902731409138415,75.58893233393486,104.05931198102016,6.3944673515268216,30.81416363385857,7.3092174570428305,3.309227803709268,8051,439,1114,189,353,2519,617,1686,0.175,0.6940000000000001,0.131,-0.9991,6,1,5,0,1,43,515.0,56,10,19,45,49,57,3,1,92,0,120,21,2,35,10,245,206,101,44,17,35,1,5,4,4,29,15,3,0,7,92,88,1,11,31,14,3,21,18,23,2,12,22,18,95,34,183,143,40,126,0,15,9,4,148,61,0,28,44,730,187,37,0.0,0.02353709758602941,0.01938563876787285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019892199242361186,0.020574429567525625,0.06576546115389577,0.04765874980922066,0.0,0.043048025372773135,0.024138478467465814,0.013509065399737705,0.020830468590486872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01389025928180229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0484387389546144,0.0,0.0,0.02238135758506877,0.0625421285599899,0.03513843549813138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040569325254324426,0.0,0.020253967601326518,0.0,0.08405929015178226,0.0,0.062485075659052126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034219857380328025,0.020162831770850792,0.041234029679400416,0.0622649398505907,0.0,0.0,0.03476846481342751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08797366832351679,0.0,0.0,0.0131208240548061,0.01796927480877001,0.06694938995524014,0.0,0.0,0.05829614026800965,0.0,0.0,0.030133433507138537,0.0,0.01907377532422755,0.021761433229662102,0.03631299536814809,0.033794778505118785,0.0,0.021781244155518225,0.0,0.0,0.06227270471980492,0.03811315592030151,0.045159564919639066,0.01666204670309696,0.07944035920280801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05270038026882392,0.02114695023271858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446341596503958,0.0671688120980954,0.02354044162671088,0.14646799553331827,0.04197749870322767,0.0,0.05919208890130749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06220254488190384,0.0,0.0,0.02197797893124067,0.020686622659290152,0.054587166738035424,0.048578541420609016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0203135853763106,0.0420942849008087,0.048525839563770386,0.01991022020413814,0.03508279625102125,0.0,0.05004547299964986,0.0,0.0650558694227382,0.0,0.035858365101539245,0.018796999617920564,0.06630111280536755,0.060420800049285885,0.0,0.04327820735899545,0.0,0.0,0.1000976033693261,0.0,0.0,0.023265965148718096,0.0,0.02111363910720564,0.0,0.0294596932741045,0.0,0.019186002393125758,0.042253881870447325,0.0,0.0,0.019061263167634398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08076732994643944,0.045325300976627514,0.02113804880980957,0.0,0.0,0.021512152494060667,0.0,0.2478973958881628,0.03469117656629686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03801676271542543,0.0,0.019970084047463345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02261102730961025,0.02545240239537409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03392966555938925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0474901467506911,0.0,0.0,0.0224421016568484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060750425873625995,0.08415889770815567,0.07646628021943905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8257165185154672,0.022542873967452224,0.0,0.0,0.07468105714820586,0.015966952241005968,0.017363122336317153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.013197603261181641,0.02545772689609444,0.0,0.015770806097292426,0.0463343967827726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.013487214929077762,0.04321542049757341,0.019405483101761645,0.04136089512100667,0.047790949817009605,0.0,0.0,0.016390928925972315,0.03515115434896845,0.06307250945263929,0.0,0.0,0.053583792701685735,0.0,0.14340253690869192,0.0,0.02284408111775153,0.019149412223380426,0.0,0.08677292271896989,0.020174146850146863,0.02024440815256144,0.0,0.0,0.024138478467465814,0.02558516626163675
mentalhealth,RichMan_24,2020/01/20,"Experiences with Gabapentin and/or Celexa for anxiety/depression? How have they worked for you, and at what daily dosage? Also, what were all of the side effects you experienced? Thanks :)",6.027000000000001,9.84947536666667,4.248333333333335,77.9625,78.66666666666666,8.333333333333334,27.5,8.841846274778883,3.0460000000000007,151,6,23,4,4,43,27,30,0.0,0.813,0.187,0.7536,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,1,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,5,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,5,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,17,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4148569414632017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4468123511507823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5074526408583472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4776099868290004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3776677888647629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Romcom1398,2020/01/20,"So me and my parents thought I might have ADD and I feel like my doctors have no idea what the frickitty frack they're talking about. This year I started Uni and I've been having trouble concentrating on school when I'm studying. Like, not getting distracted by my phone, sounds, everything really.  
My old psychologist from when I as 12 thought I might have ADD but then when she heard how well I did in school she digressed.   
My best friend has ADD and she said it wouldn't be a big surprise if I did have ADD (and she knows me very well).  
Every only test I fill out it says there's a big fat chance I have ADD.  
This was not the case with the test I filled out at the doctors office. This was kind of like a pre-test. But when I filled that one out with half of the questions I just didn't really know what the right answers were. I thought I wasn't that often distracted, just with school, but then my parents were like 'sweetheart remember this and this and this and this and this?' and I realized that yes, I do get distracted a lot. So the test wasn't totally accurate. And I only needed about 2 or 3 points more to possibly have ADD.  
So I wanted to redo the test. And my parents even want me to get officially tested, since ADD also runs in the family and it's just nice to know whether I can rule ADD out or not.   
But when I asked my doctor about it, he said 'You need three things to have ADD. Impulsivity, distractedness and something else (I don't remember). You only have one of them so you most probably don't have it and it's gonna be a waste of money.' Even though impulsivity is part of ADHD and distinguishes ADHD from ADD. It's like he had no idea what he was talking about. And he was like 'Why would you need a label? What are you gonna do when you get a label? Just take medicine?' and I was like 'Well... I mean if it helps me... Sure? And I want the label because I want to know.'' 'But why not just work on your problem of distractedness? You don't need the label.'' ANd in my head I was like 'Well.. if you know it's because of ADD you might have a better way to treat it?' but I didn't say that because social anxiety and it seemed as if he refused to give me the test (which turns out wasn't the case, he was just trying to be reasonable and wanted me to think it through).  


And then last time at the doctors office with the lady I regularly talk to (kind of therapist-like but not really) she asked about my recent grades, and I boasted that I got only one 7 out of 10 and an 8, 9, and 8.5, and she immidiately was like 'see this is why I think you probably dont have ADD. People with ADD usually don't do this well in school.' and I immidiately told her that my other friend has ADD, she studied way less than me (I study about 6 hours a day just summarising everything, and like all through the semester, not just right before the exams and my friend only studied about a five days leading up to the exams, with only summaries from the internet) and I got an 8 and she mostly got 6's. So I was like 'Well my friend has ADD but she also did very well'.  
'That's because ADD is different for everyone'. And I wanted to straight up yell at her and tell her 'Yeah well MAYBE ITS LIKE THAT WITH ME TOO?' Plus apperently (so I've read) women with ADD ofteb manage to hide it well and can still do well in school. So I was like 'Woman you're a sweetheart but you have no idea what the F you're talking about'. Didn't say that out loud. But I thought it.

I did get a referance after all though because 'if this is really what you want (sneaky headshake) I will write you a note to get tested'.  


And that was my rant. Ok. Bai.",1.7992334042050544,3.6477713989290517,3.195469525159464,91.7186614103473,78.65194109772423,6.482471060713443,21.427061185920152,7.45546127846077,0.5728255138199851,2813,78,629,39,68,918,259,747,0.037000000000000005,0.7859999999999999,0.177,0.9987,5,0,1,0,0,0,86.0,0,14,1,4,50,43,0,3,35,3,66,6,2,3,4,155,114,78,0,19,32,3,1,13,6,8,5,9,0,2,45,69,1,1,25,1,1,5,21,5,10,6,36,11,89,38,71,67,10,53,0,0,1,0,65,25,0,16,34,430,134,23,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11726831138335285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803210497632479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03732297967517016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122110485214864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14870472807293328,0.0,0.04151532074333885,0.0,0.051200398256058856,0.043149360271776134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629289421162317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050973476457263515,0.0,0.19974791054179272,0.0,0.0,0.057179621855893724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04075643384800191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444853405422929,0.0,0.041106317145336635,0.04661939101132727,0.0876957060111691,0.0,0.0459933457084263,0.0,0.02466887251699593,0.03485443076888598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15077513561205694,0.0,0.1529394996083812,0.046802262894912405,0.0,0.0,0.11706158105565816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05007095670177362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03270182490255067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04804672986665642,0.0,0.0,0.1652284385670921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161118687022552,0.13406409764147084,0.03976904407799122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098620158112106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04147813878183583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04901448861659456,0.05314485220462462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15527029411090054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470387204893675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05119520117066563,0.0,0.09918081350644252,0.22263458387282967,0.0,0.0,0.1625211777742317,0.0528330647069915,0.0,0.03382372194112146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046120792005685536,0.05500157156723078,0.0,0.0,0.10520425795315708,0.04668389379093876,0.0,0.0,0.054654155027920134,0.0,0.04880158611678893,0.0,0.12502035052740107,0.05016258371319124,0.048172642621874484,0.0,0.11053545507536776,0.08333002550445466,0.09281784986731106,0.11639544183733375,0.0,0.2468822428715149,0.038878024826765764,0.04441511178130464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04035825482056449,0.0,0.0,0.04973361269550202,0.0,0.037559681039374966,0.0,0.0,0.03453266880324,0.0,0.03896246591582757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04598247386155855,0.0,0.03668279244289521,0.15685701766114155,0.04264319742821299,0.0,0.0,0.056647073360964424,0.032412833967578186,0.06252325204396082,0.0958686777354026,0.15493010645953947,0.02844889864065803,0.0,0.0,0.04661939101132727,0.0,0.03312410969854375,0.05306775107973311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05373351142017909,0.08051105148986694,0.20143656768425294,0.07745189548241742,0.0,0.0,0.43866615824641386,0.0,0.13207178210784762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03551852410005497,0.0,0.0,0.034657867680255486,0.0,0.0,0.031418119247095234
mentalhealth,LeastStable,2020/01/20,"I don’t have the courage to go see a shrink. Having a combination of depression and crippling anxiety are probably not in my best interest. Therapists have been recommended to me but i just can’t ring them to buck an appointment. Maybe it’s shyness, or unwillingness to admit that i need help. But i just can’t go, and i’ve no idea what to do next.",3.0414761904761893,4.930553814285716,4.974285714285717,80.17904761904764,75.14285714285714,9.80952380952381,28.809523809523807,10.125756701596842,3.124238095238096,277,12,57,9,6,95,52,70,0.162,0.682,0.157,-0.0987,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,1,2,4,0,0,4,0,9,0,0,0,0,11,14,5,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,1,2,5,1,0,0,1,2,7,3,7,13,1,4,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,1,1,40,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277778260025656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31247010572923845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564515159589002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3384362113193234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19957545317784425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3361233468688673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29912975214952503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22077774655400664,0.0,0.0,0.3166603513389813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32102470611055245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372680866154372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3457105336140208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WolfyTale,2020/01/20,"My crippling trust issues I'm struggling mentally, mostly with trust issues. I have an incredibly hard time comparing myself to other girls. Things like my boyfriend watching a tv show, which has some mild sex scenes, drives me absolutely crazy. I trust him, but my mind still says that I don't trust him. I always think he's looking at the other girls sexually, and I really want to get better. My mood will just crash as soon as he starts doing anything with girls in it. How do I get better?",4.92598784194529,6.516117617021282,5.213100303951368,81.60500000000002,69.63829787234043,7.924620060790273,25.130699088145896,8.418075326091056,1.5836613981762917,392,11,73,6,7,124,70,94,0.084,0.7,0.21600000000000005,0.9273,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,4,9,0,1,3,0,6,1,0,1,0,11,13,5,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,3,6,3,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,4,14,7,8,12,2,7,0,0,2,1,8,2,0,2,5,45,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932276425092596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19109925129943656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.410763688762284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24265324221460996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080256602442157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4847597115785287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134521362543936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19500833208014864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340255632521541,0.0,0.23447842818517195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487676179598525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18467257584307745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436821231047688,0.0,0.18545311126348848,0.0,0.0,0.2427692768371513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15427824607252094,0.14879873931636287,0.0,0.0,0.13541075085769755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369707901518317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Black_Sands01,2020/01/20,"Fear of Failure. . . Fear of Missing Out I feel like a failure because while most of my friends have high paying jobs, a house, decent cars, etc. I’m stuck at a $30-$35k bracket, stuck living with my parent, stuck in a pile of student loan/credit card debt and unable to properly save money despite creating a budget that feels so frugal I might as well be a hermit. 

However, I also know that these same friends are buried deeper than I am in debt, they all seem to hate their houses because of the work they must put into it as well as the fact that now they all feel stuck with living in their homes for 20+ years. Still, I can’t help but think “What would I give to have a job/house like theirs” I want to help myself and my girlfriend (who is in a similar financial situation as me) get out of our parent’s house, to get married and live the adult life. 

Until then, I wish I would stop comparing myself to my friends who, despite having everything I think I want in life, are just as miserable as I am, if not more…",8.178547425474253,5.645226843902442,7.9713821138211385,78.48140921409215,63.487804878048784,10.867208672086722,34.485094850948514,8.841846274778883,2.6694444444444434,793,24,165,9,9,255,124,205,0.14400000000000002,0.7090000000000001,0.146,0.537,7,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,0,6,1,7,13,1,3,11,0,14,2,0,0,4,33,34,16,0,7,4,2,3,2,4,4,2,0,1,1,8,8,0,1,7,0,5,2,2,5,2,0,4,3,26,8,32,25,5,19,0,2,0,0,19,10,0,4,9,111,34,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891395101401638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13555369202397904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399975431036647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992517452633658,0.0,0.0,0.2502262339444983,0.16865419098044415,0.07943000258538238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25770187205656325,0.0,0.1161782933696637,0.10665799959249933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097713622277189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904882847061587,0.11747219382581055,0.11152680100165176,0.0,0.0,0.5131664774544626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220666291349178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061103919285779434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15706535318794412,0.1086379514148062,0.0,0.2945330118610309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794884792353286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24691375502843926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117708132409977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121790446132807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497568018098736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879183220486639,0.09295495552656696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424846701536607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115862368952133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19993586648809336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785632339883593,0.0,0.0,0.08094340945641858,0.0,0.0,0.1579641072149704,0.0,0.0,0.07159896856649735
mentalhealth,alva69420,2020/01/20,"I act severely schizophrenic after even a tiny bit of alcohol I went to my first ever party back July and had a few shots of vodka which was the first time I’ve really drank. It started with my just laughing at the sky for no reason but then my boyfriend starting getting concerned when it turned to me telling him that he didn’t love me and that nobody did and then saying “no I don’t want to” “don’t tell anyone you can never tell anyone” and “no please don’t touch me” Over and over again even when I wasn’t being touched and I was whispering it to myself on the verge of tears.

Then a month later when I went to another party it started all good and then I just went outside and sat alone in the dark telling myself “run away never come back you have to even if you die” and when someone found me and I came back in this other girl was really drunk and started telling me she was sexually abused by her cousin and I immediately without hesitation told her the same thing happened to me when I was young and that I’d never told anyone. She told my boyfriend who was obviously concerned and tried getting me to tell him what happened but I wouldn’t.

The thing is is that to my knowledge I’ve never been sexually abused by anyone but it’s almost like a vivid memory of something happening comes out whenever I drink.",5.085501336898397,5.7019976704545465,5.618743315508024,82.43855614973266,68.50757575757575,8.484491978609626,28.40819964349377,8.4952907291091,1.8901918894830647,1051,34,210,15,17,339,134,264,0.115,0.789,0.096,-0.7398,0,1,4,0,2,0,5.0,0,3,0,2,15,4,0,0,10,0,20,6,0,1,7,40,44,27,1,3,7,1,2,1,0,1,2,2,0,1,16,19,4,0,3,3,0,8,14,0,0,2,21,5,35,4,27,21,4,47,0,0,1,1,24,10,0,2,30,157,51,0,0.0,0.21283276289338846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598518488770533,0.08993699646490066,0.09302150942372417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417911801302006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25120363710487786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438438145012914,0.20718714381127645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805498819321794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272471594716157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15473576566376354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321404678102484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798474941005524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17796637147903555,0.081243033274653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527936070776152,0.0,0.09847778291122006,0.0,0.0,0.09384951953625063,0.0,0.0,0.0753327682463212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382699799146763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043879193126210816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810617673813187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168967357082323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770842228535574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859017061002856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507589464423007,0.0923450330143874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714246896361936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146566464499863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610016764310171,0.06914416540866583,0.0,0.0,0.25428677748682343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4710149098614101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11933851892237175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05237199302203556,0.0,0.0,0.25746695345675835,0.0,0.06097865734295955,0.0976931980512908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05297535993721023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497789024235866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657869340919905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yeyo1983,2020/01/20,"How do mental health professionals help you deal with addictions? Hi there,

I am struggling with a porn addiction and I just want to know what type of methods they use to help you. I just want to know what to expect. I continued to watch porn because I thought it wouldn't harm me the same way video games or movies does not harm you. I'm a dumb ass I know. Another reason why i watch porn so much is because of jealousy. I'm a 36 year old virgin. So what methods do they use? Thank you.",1.5151000000000003,3.642700309999999,2.588000000000001,94.31900000000002,80.9,6.0,22.0,7.1686216300943375,0.5413999999999999,381,12,85,5,10,121,63,100,0.114,0.728,0.159,0.3939,0,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,4,2,0,6,5,1,1,4,0,5,8,1,4,0,20,16,5,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,14,1,9,14,2,4,0,0,2,5,11,0,2,1,3,47,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4170353120063126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20056820030310027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23319856331785985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19719581666416855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16738577878453362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033160614938929,0.0,0.0,0.2564147987751537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153587182563843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927599091228128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14060891271219492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007106215868376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19666224816487984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999618464352079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17610004502218835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15185074606087726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303998550026159,0.0,0.0,0.2256375474135637,0.15182495360778228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17259566570558718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317463549273285
mentalhealth,MeanGreenWahooQueen,2020/01/20,"Need ideas for coping after major arguments So this weekend a casual get together with friends went completely sideways. We had all been drinking, and only one witness. Shit happened so fast, I believe we were all truly floored. The friend who witnessed the blow out, initially told all that I initiated it. This was not the case, and she confirmed that to my husband the following day.

My ""friend"" innocently enough put her hands around my face and lovingly told me to stop making everything she says out to be negative. We had a recent disagreement that we decided not to discuss and just move forward. So when she started this talk, it immediately triggered me. But she followed it up with getting in my face and screaming at me that she never wanted to hear a particular word ever come out of my mouth again...Bipolar.

A couple weeks ago, I briefly explained that I had just been diagnosed, and was struggling with feeling shame. Told her I was learning a new vocabulary and still getting the gist of it. It wasn't really discussed beyond that, or again since.

This ""friend"" isn't the type to allow others to speak much...but I'm sure I muttered a statement or so back about moving forward, but that she didn't get a pass to tear me down...that we obviously need to resolve it another time...

She continued screaming accusing me of lying about having cancer (stage 4 breast cancer, thriving 3 years now)....and it went to hell in a handbasket after that. I initially tried to tell her that we weren't going to do this now...but I readily defended myself after that.

We managed to pull it together, offer brief apologies, and left abruptly.  Thought it was done. Pretty much felt confident that a parting of ways was in order, but didn't need it to be a big deal.

The next day she gave my number to one of her friends, which initiated a group chat stirring a ton of drama. My husband was included. The sticking point here is this woman and my husband have been close friends for a number of years. The group texts blew up our phones with 43 messages over two hours. Their mission was to try to expose lies to my husband. Fact is that while I've done a lot of things I'm not proud of, I'm brutally honest. Information is being shared with her that is 100% true, hurtful, embarrassing, and can affect quite a few people. 

So I have no love lost over ending my friendship with this circle. My husband has been put in a very uncomfortable position, and I feel horribly for that. He is quite upset with the four ""friends"" that spent hours harassing me during our Sunday. But I kind of doubt he just wants to call it done. My man has a huge heart, and huge capacity for forgiveness. 

Just seeking advice on how to overcome the emotional hangover of it all? I can't concentrate, so my usual strategies to distract my mind just aren't working. 

My anxiety is in overdrive and I am overwhelmed with how awful this must be for my husband. I know I'm not giving them another moment to drain my energy or peace. Just really nervous about helping my husband cope.

Open to words of wisdom! Dang that was long, but therapeutic I think.",4.901691315889266,6.67067205119454,5.436789533560866,79.27751270383013,69.95563139931741,8.348820629503223,30.769662495259773,8.904972459349038,2.6733906408797874,2466,104,439,46,45,792,298,586,0.159,0.7070000000000001,0.134,-0.9744,1,0,1,0,0,0,86.0,9,0,2,6,25,35,4,8,28,1,45,13,7,6,11,95,84,31,0,6,18,7,4,0,7,1,3,5,0,2,40,35,1,1,14,5,1,15,14,16,0,4,33,9,64,19,70,46,11,75,1,3,0,3,71,26,3,5,35,310,104,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07940224772442595,0.07202838249630905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170407625993555,0.06216048055059674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07233490779942446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624807106185044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154748478212874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297127804300893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06999469478842339,0.08519518221455642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990802027068323,0.0,0.10480656465614346,0.08377118337507926,0.0,0.08247294775085524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494587484732633,0.0,0.07959977002828039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140186173250912,0.0719685392761705,0.08395898399797944,0.0,0.0,0.07350054195100368,0.0,0.0,0.07302749238299226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217076898166413,0.0,0.07801833063948603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4394463194261892,0.0,0.16981125075515446,0.07794798747910672,0.04617955553561103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185425403463418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09158121560189768,0.0962885389500952,0.054464063922965815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004123161597258,0.0,0.0869860368030126,0.09172793125792836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461543344262623,0.04465607412111293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828468711522845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190884448914048,0.0,0.0,0.08870032709632551,0.06908079315914115,0.1466731015296047,0.0,0.05423889138554179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820452156374059,0.0,0.0,0.17272415647849332,0.1194647554926969,0.1807504847357749,0.06266949830934943,0.07847737812322562,0.0864164873113249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012209426321258,0.06179871329121105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879921356689588,0.0,0.056332555122028526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681301491463688,0.0,0.0,0.08266638180907163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16336908594433364,0.0,0.17285113492165075,0.0,0.0,0.10410911903367306,0.0,0.08023032032354006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461789011735894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340793243481046,0.06721565468950702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057513288225807035,0.0,0.06489100350086252,0.06793350463339562,0.0,0.08494622649257744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658264953698937,0.0,0.0,0.06531035089111993,0.0710211689265296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053982756815414416,0.05206544904055769,0.0,0.06450804539921946,0.04738092258520781,0.0,0.0,0.232930256919022,0.0,0.11033473718294573,0.0,0.07937513004722954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949180694089592,0.06704456200710816,0.0958535768173796,0.06449708845117429,0.06517851821797592,0.0,0.0,0.15064992000808078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05915520533791097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465216911363807
mentalhealth,clockthehair,2020/01/20,"Going to the doctor's tomorrow. Wish me luck I been putting this off for awhile. I am scared to see the doctor about my mental health (general practitioner). I am not sure if this is the right way to go about things (please advise!) (I live in Singapore so therapy isn't very common). 

I been experiencing so much pessimism lately and I cry every other day. I lost count over how much I cried. I am super stressed by school and now I am even more stressed since I am not performing well. 

I told myself in 2020 I will love myself more and make decisions for myself. I booked an appointment with a doctor tomorrow, but I am really scared he will dismiss my symptoms or something. 

I am in so much pain nowadays. I just want to step in a direction where I can stop being so miserable. Just looking for support here. I don't really know anyone i can talk to about this.",2.719119822485208,4.952229414201189,4.09978920118343,84.48210983727813,77.34319526627219,7.538609467455621,23.58025147928994,8.472884824447931,1.6283281065088753,677,22,132,14,16,223,104,169,0.187,0.732,0.081,-0.9458,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,15,13,0,5,6,0,17,7,0,2,1,21,29,11,0,3,7,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,2,1,0,4,4,7,1,0,4,3,26,6,19,22,5,20,0,2,2,1,5,8,0,3,7,98,31,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096614523443924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28580868537601484,0.08390115479943339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3994762934106484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859271783449495,0.0,0.1096114875624423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14787310509696092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13828596010692534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149735705702948,0.0,0.14675394998790953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487714787230938,0.0,0.10924787106449817,0.0,0.14201514759854214,0.0,0.1174167156105429,0.0,0.08684008749295928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131106164989196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28690657812955106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843131211560142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280633643303015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078240866140267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166685652577867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110126968885783,0.0,0.0,0.26049757470499635,0.13166409337144375,0.10366966516811413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761675220539764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015425357958163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087660779077058,0.2980490475708283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14763139447018614,0.12261393653793545,0.1352195526348908,0.0,0.10456623357704847,0.0,0.0,0.14877610932051902,0.0,0.08642999894004758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431229924927603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734282139432502,0.07673398906852667,0.10326414609635852,0.0,0.0,0.11697192423901195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14960397488239446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theythethem,2020/01/20,"Today is supposed to be the most depressing day of the year. Go easy on yourself and others Today I woke up miserable. No energy, kinda anxious, kinda sad, kinda feeling sick to my stomach. After going through my usual morning routines, the sad feelings grew stronger and I started getting agitated and upset. It started becoming too much and I was breaking down to my boyfriend as I heard the radio DJ start talking about how today is “blue monday”. January 20th is supposedly the most depressing day of the year for most people, and it’s statistically common for people to have a bad day today. We are right in the middle of winter and all finished with the holidays now, so I guess it just starts catching up to most people around this time. 

I know it didn’t really make me feel any better at all to know this day is hard for a lot of people, but I know I’m personally going to keep this fact in mind today while interacting with others and even while just dealing with my own emotions.  Be kind to yourself and others today",5.827846153846152,6.891931784615388,6.719487179487178,73.60384615384619,67.05128205128204,8.666666666666668,31.41025641025641,8.841846274778883,2.754025641025641,818,32,137,13,13,272,116,195,0.114,0.818,0.068,-0.4817,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,1,9,9,0,2,10,0,10,2,1,2,3,38,30,14,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,10,13,0,1,6,3,0,5,2,7,0,0,4,6,13,2,30,24,9,42,0,5,1,0,6,10,0,9,26,101,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322542568327639,0.0,0.0,0.12164664234151933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585715657048632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990748346835938,0.0,0.11892301704947494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952333422430903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27777623787718925,0.11101234086239872,0.18548756330280106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112440365890367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112097678846117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333724284892176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056257843364516134,0.0,0.18358940461804624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862057974207935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645925109435448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571006002142313,0.0,0.1121311286423444,0.17753271908718005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915448516811666,0.0,0.0,0.07187658161077863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872511378630256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915646898778123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.298604296079067,0.0940211663928325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898193712569853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195729424500826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3048630566935516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654831700902914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278850216133812,0.0,0.6124027190539378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859322712480805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13868351623511485
mentalhealth,theramblingmind,2020/01/20,"What to do about bad friends? Need advice I live alone and for the most part, I work on a very small team and spend the majority of my day alone. Because of that, I place a lot of value on my friends. The problem? I don’t really have any.

I do have friends via work and one I play video games with online so that helps but they all live far away (I don’t have a car and it’s an hour drive to get to any of them because they live in the opposite direction from work). 

The real problem is my college friends. I moved up to the city so that I could see them more; four of six of the guys I lived with, my best friends in the world, all live here. Then one moved to Kenya and didn’t invite me to his going away party. The others live not even a 15 minute drive away and I am always the one to reach out. Not once have they engaged first and it makes me feel really shitty and like a huge burden to them. One of them even works at the same company as me and I haven’t seen him since November.

I’m used to getting the runaround and I always hear “I’ve been so busy” which I’m not buying as an excuse anymore. I hold my tongue but I’m always thinking “really? You’re so busy you didn’t have time to send a five second text? You’re telling me that not once did you have a single moment to yourself to watch a movie or play video games when instead you could reach out? Which again takes five seconds”

For the past two months, I’ve been doing an experiment: I’ve resolved to not text my friends for at least three months to see if they even remember me. It’s already been two months and nothing. Which leads me to my question: what do I do about it? Do I just let them fade into the background and try to forget or move on? Or in the future, say at four months, should I confront them and ask point blank if we’re even friends anymore?

This has happened to me a lot and I’m struggling to understand why. I have so many friends, outside my college friends, that have ghosted new for inexplicable reasons. One didn’t respond to me for six months and I honestly thought he had died or moved. He ended up texting me a week before he went to Amsterdam for grad school and the only question I had for him was “what the hell man?” to which he didn’t have any answer. Another friend at my old job did the same thing; I was actively trying to get him a job at my new job because he’s pretty skilled and he just ignored me for four months and when he did get back in contact, he had no excuse. I understand if something really bad happens like a parent dying but that’s never the case; all I get is a shrug and a half baked apology. It happened again recently but thankfully not as bad with a girl I used to be into that I’ve been trying to hang out with and she ignored me for two weeks and couldn’t even extend the courtesy of telling me she was busy.

Why do people treat me this way? I’m not a pushover by any means, in fact I’m widely regarded as a “force of nature” and a somewhat intense individual. But I struggle to understand why people abandon me and just forget about me. Is it because I don’t have any social media like Facebook? Or am I just that shitty of a person that no one wants to be around me? 

It makes me really really sad. Thankfully I’ve never had issues with suicide and I never will, I’m very fortunate to be incredibly self-aware, but this stuff is wearing on me in a bad way and I’m slipping further into a depression. And I don’t have anyone I can talk to about it; I have a therapist but I haven’t seen her for a while and won’t for another while because of insurance issues and the 15 minutes with the Suicide and Crisis line in my city isn’t enough.

What do I do?",2.8574691635905296,4.035213279373373,4.0411074097416035,89.61276762402088,74.16971279373371,7.005996218600884,25.08679211308184,7.438213257848477,1.0053993697668142,2876,91,633,33,58,940,288,766,0.129,0.732,0.139,-0.7190000000000001,4,2,1,0,1,2,60.0,0,3,10,10,26,38,2,2,48,0,64,2,1,6,7,114,104,58,5,11,26,1,1,3,10,3,0,2,1,4,31,42,1,4,13,7,2,12,25,16,0,21,22,8,82,22,94,72,16,82,1,3,5,0,62,36,1,14,35,435,113,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839099070953972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257688498976003,0.05464725136073365,0.0,0.12361540426346795,0.0,0.0,0.16837864730102142,0.1038534056983896,0.0,0.0,0.09822232527221834,0.0346259789159913,0.0,0.0,0.044083863512853316,0.046295108278033424,0.0,0.1395787981387186,0.038078311051834214,0.16539064465526165,0.150936595182662,0.0,0.04213841242386331,0.0,0.051968850519504464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907639391877075,0.0,0.0,0.03193671238486895,0.0,0.04265204976093595,0.0,0.10278920021102893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04386058348850715,0.05116805293383135,0.0,0.16353955958092034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048440682611982186,0.0,0.0,0.025039120631620573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04212222623957405,0.0,0.0,0.3825951922040845,0.0,0.12936243766969835,0.0,0.02814371767723888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049033213581921725,0.1313728001063094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05581335390832382,0.0,0.033192637322397286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04876784961522835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337335269296916,0.14742476515625286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050638203699323266,0.0,0.07257984160816358,0.0,0.2623657640919703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842013448176804,0.0,0.0,0.06611081586110004,0.05020615061123709,0.0,0.0539424882261822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23716138707223414,0.21053038902556545,0.0,0.03671892286118495,0.1145800980716948,0.09565467438277113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04751638419157225,0.0,0.051963575432529815,0.10547571870572896,0.20133878044236575,0.03766267387184502,0.0,0.0,0.05498680402030784,0.05362602119838073,0.047273048817738084,0.0686627451911828,0.04323950777251677,0.051738522915757416,0.0,0.04681300589885538,0.0,0.0,0.05038028807443271,0.0,0.09476911823835757,0.0,0.0,0.11094888749540903,0.0,0.0,0.0563653232821354,0.19034511829267967,0.05091545971235634,0.04889565215929649,0.0,0.05609722519333546,0.0,0.0,0.039380796009597874,0.0,0.05011752569401735,0.07892306816096616,0.0,0.051660821625926064,0.0,0.0,0.040963980426652086,0.0,0.0,0.050480050390264736,0.0,0.03812340364490348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353943810959013,0.056689278567728874,0.10833507280420096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037233354076054236,0.03980281004358447,0.0865664341803541,0.09118389351630088,0.0,0.057497273227069025,0.032899309004403215,0.031730822905087434,0.0,0.03931385212718503,0.02887588009583375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086378021356007,0.0,0.1451233922501063,0.15465818024175987,0.0,0.08553985659845742,0.0,0.08171941903889186,0.029208553146657813,0.07861434902611761,0.07944493159675077,0.0,0.0,0.04590612412387249,0.1340540100465934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14420644623878426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,classicbenny,2020/01/20,"Severe Apathy, looking for answers Hi there, I am new to this subreddit and am not entirely sure how posting is regulated but I will give this a go anyway. My name is Ben, Im a 22 M from western Canada. 

I won’t dive into detail yet but I am suffering from really bad apathy. I have a hard time doing anything or having any motivation at all as I do not get any stimulation from much. I guess anhedonia is an issue but overall, I fear this feeing of nothingness.

I am a really deep thinker and have been stuck in an existential crisis for a while where I question the importance of everything, thinking everything has some meaning. This may have caused issues with derealization as well.

I see a therapist bi-weekly but am trying to look for some magical words of advice I guess.. or someone to talk to that is in a similar space.

Thanks for reading!",3.726655052264807,5.766500585365852,5.9590592334494765,73.20353658536588,73.6341463414634,9.563763066202087,28.787456445993037,9.957137785484203,3.285031010452961,672,28,119,20,14,236,108,164,0.18600000000000005,0.7390000000000001,0.075,-0.9586,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,6,6,0,1,10,0,20,0,0,4,2,30,32,12,0,0,8,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,6,1,1,1,4,3,1,0,2,4,13,3,21,27,4,13,0,1,3,0,5,7,0,8,4,91,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512414382643281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21050057804076505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736419478473227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292281817666681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589935106331987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781982449457381,0.0,0.0,0.17416156502282076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086199866409294,0.14847143593547646,0.08796051242595627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409976844824417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864534021669891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16718035341719428,0.3230835804402777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25993905285148583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16859211566577945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137752517115056,0.0,0.0,0.14947979281094048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14822882357572198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17338009692085918,0.0,0.15481391536467987,0.0,0.1983018535411201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333327098576008,0.0,0.0,0.1748483418885485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13113784033634446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14587080837138847,0.0,0.0,0.1243998965445198,0.0,0.14249329265362606,0.0,0.1797022580367352,0.0,0.09917166859181577,0.0,0.0,0.09024881641824356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508005012641468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12414878824887395,0.0,0.13915864401125752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gabbierod,2020/01/20,"can you be anxious around only certain people? i’m incredibly shy when it comes to going out with my parents but i’m fine with friends. like if i’m at a restaurant with my family, i’ll ask my mom to order for me bc i’m too shy to order my own food, but if i’m with my friends, i’m fine with ordering for myself, i’ll even order for them if they ask. my parents make me so nervous but i’m completely normal with my friends. sometimes i cry if i’m going somewhere and i know there are going to be a lot of people and i’m going with my parents, but i could be going to the same place with the same amount of people there with my friends and still be the outgoing one. does that not seem healthy or am i just overreacting?",1.6698610421836264,3.1127529290322613,3.6767741935483897,89.93823821339953,77.7741935483871,6.317617866004963,24.18114143920595,7.010146845296331,0.7992481389578168,564,19,126,6,13,192,76,155,0.099,0.7290000000000001,0.172,0.922,3,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,2,0,9,9,0,1,5,0,8,1,0,1,1,35,28,14,0,6,11,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,15,1,0,2,0,0,6,1,1,0,1,0,0,19,8,22,23,5,16,0,0,0,0,13,4,0,7,3,82,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15307704120842214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062420814926407,0.25334942685293593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672171694632574,0.14206973790937633,0.0,0.0,0.10818615520132326,0.0,0.14884098028674286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857743544652576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949682856075558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127737849625533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384779050521775,0.0,0.418749523511045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.385040396720625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446755299461306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619871931922906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519771333987655,0.0,0.0,0.0904476624538806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15869659447591067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276175945432978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918186725078284,0.10305426635872544,0.0,0.0,0.4513719419130218,0.0,0.0,0.2818170394352888,0.0,0.14156922420618054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335460233287855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13401349854046102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821090606774708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pillowpossum,2020/01/20,"Constantly uncomfortable. (Venting/advice?) I do and say things that embarrass me or that I regret and obsess over them and how people treated me or how they reacted for weeks or even months. 

Everyone else that has been there, wether it was an argument where I got too angry or whatever, probably doesn't worry about their actions or how I look at them now. I resent them for this because I obsess over how much I care that they may see me poorly after this, and the incident isn't even on their radar. 

My boyfriend thinks I should just avoid situations like that, where I get anxious and mad. It just upsets me that I have to do so much calculating when it comes to myself and no one else notices or thinks about it at all. 

Like they're all fine and moved on, but I will feel guilty about this for months. I'm not entirely sure that I'm only depressed and anxious but I'm going to a doctor later today, hopefully it helps me understand myself better. 

I just always feel like I'm not meant to have friends. I feel hopeless, no matter how I describe my thoughts or feelings they sound ugly and mean, it's easier to just not say anything.",6.2454885654885635,6.356812945945947,6.431261261261263,79.36949064449065,65.93693693693693,9.533471933471937,30.139986139986142,9.265573868473778,2.433730006930007,902,29,173,15,13,289,124,222,0.191,0.679,0.13,-0.8754,0,1,0,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,8,1,21,20,2,5,3,0,12,1,0,6,3,51,34,25,0,3,16,0,4,3,1,3,1,3,0,0,17,10,0,1,10,0,1,4,7,10,0,1,5,9,31,10,18,26,4,21,0,3,2,0,12,8,0,9,12,127,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527193756409392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151846311493376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31277240230677805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391587915681042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438548324930617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242985363069288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113834345317214,0.0,0.0,0.1192449616300314,0.0,0.14959336839862933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192293302460646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14168870231585126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312805658805425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828630723902788,0.0,0.0,0.13227554665745914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799769389365008,0.09889423227919804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695047196450692,0.0,0.07232382447646266,0.0,0.07867281005483585,0.0,0.11071490704344718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09278653521300573,0.0,0.0,0.137491964331905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028893324660911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624611525560105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15079056643379465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22098659188589226,0.14712890365559522,0.20352357029241366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15760317388832873,0.0,0.0,0.09380357286169164,0.10528205341091912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09596975019825252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492506704781385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220169767178768,0.0,0.0,0.11031057839586944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560082516406526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304683895425003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196656667473704,0.1774003727527791,0.0,0.10989774898954903,0.0,0.0,0.13121520518417645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14411023894244165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11103998563745876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14058211818331706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,psychmentalhealthba,2020/01/20,I'm a mental health professional and would love to offer information or my own insight into mental health. *****I am not a doctor. If you are in an immediate crisis please contact your doctor or call 911.,0.7765789473684208,2.727562315789477,3.651973684210528,77.34006578947371,110.05263157894736,5.0578947368421066,17.907894736842106,6.6274283507984215,0.9160421052631578,160,5,26,3,8,56,32,38,0.096,0.7509999999999999,0.153,0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,3,5,0,0,0,9,5,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,3,4,1,2,0,0,0,1,7,2,0,3,0,19,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526141913733691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5064309850365725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5259307960111226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22328031948549146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4986245144584298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715613723098937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17573969130362102,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cantadult12,2020/01/20,"Just be 100% honest!!! Even if your afraid you’ll lose something. My boyfriend and I have been having fights really often, and it’s gotten to the point that he’s almost thrown in the towel a couple of times. Whenever he would say a certain behavior of mine was pushing him away I would try my best to change it, which is fine. However, I began becoming angry because he had his own tendencies I wanted him to work on, but I would never tell him the entire truth of what I was thinking or feeling. There were always “I don’t want to upset anyone” filters on everything I said. It wasn’t until yesterday that I told him some things that had been said, which caused me to question how I saw myself to the point that I felt like I needed space from him. Being a kind good hearted person, this got his attention, and for the first time since this relationship started I feel truly heard. But people! Nobody can hear you if you don’t speak! He knew filtered versions of what I felt, but never the full story. Honestly, I was fearful that if I said what I felt he’d want out of the relationship, which shows I haven’t been trusting him the way he deserves to be trusted. Anyways, speak up kids! Whether long term or short term, it will work out.",4.576441539578795,5.6729049012345705,5.086763495521666,84.05239651416126,69.94650205761317,7.692955700798838,26.639796659404503,7.928766900206844,1.528433260711692,973,30,189,12,17,311,146,243,0.054000000000000006,0.772,0.174,0.9821,2,0,1,0,1,0,29.0,0,4,0,5,7,16,1,3,11,0,26,1,1,2,4,40,48,14,0,10,10,0,5,1,0,5,0,8,0,2,18,5,0,0,9,1,0,1,6,5,0,1,23,14,36,11,22,16,7,26,0,1,1,0,34,12,0,9,13,136,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210443661661518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058226499282648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452246079803953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357121505541865,0.0,0.0,0.07368763482625648,0.13350302239568673,0.0,0.0,0.12685663389939253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12417757830442187,0.12787554775657098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337519813238942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984043453121396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863960487544816,0.0,0.0,0.1360241766604917,0.12224163233843666,0.0,0.3481927286752826,0.0,0.0,0.10282089712751227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138883376515956,0.0966791837399064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362411162199586,0.14324398228972735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587844598800166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05905610959464477,0.0,0.0,0.10697544441728192,0.0,0.1352343668037741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963136394239013,0.18646099741077587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380332297301894,0.10554819574909467,0.0,0.0,0.22854230146238866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354138321499688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743914782416499,0.0,0.0,0.2595608515559687,0.0,0.0,0.34495512928611555,0.09612903060423228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999360417054758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305971963657744,0.0,0.0,0.08555984471123124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565489075683478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030763729030739,0.07745534766227724,0.0,0.0,0.14097279094003198,0.0,0.0,0.11550650423772313,0.0,0.08206992914892479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138953640238328,0.095949319582337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600489691012236,0.0,0.0,0.25761013088569984,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moo4mtn,2020/01/20,"Skipping Appointments I've been trying to find a therapist that fits with me since losing mine a year ago. I find myself dreading appointments some days. So I try to talk myself into going, instead of cancelling. But I mostly end up just not going without letting the therapist know. I understand this is a dick move, but I'm so amotivated and under invested in life that it just doesn't matter to me. Does this happen to anyone else? I'm sure there's some psychological reason for this. Maybe it's that I think nothing will help.",4.748440594059407,6.655812693069308,5.690185643564359,76.75329826732674,70.5841584158416,8.218316831683168,27.476485148514854,8.841846274778883,2.331345544554455,426,15,73,8,8,140,71,101,0.122,0.847,0.031,-0.6806,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,1,4,0,5,2,1,1,1,20,13,5,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,6,0,1,3,3,2,0,0,1,0,10,1,12,10,3,12,0,1,0,1,2,5,1,3,4,52,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16087541435796354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689846235067215,0.1859527277295094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704274712371733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881865966669434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516073469573161,0.0,0.16074175450746228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3317478228503714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20628410285455756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16048649838550094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12164550344684925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973935522156294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855806070128624,0.12818815255814875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20303518191893152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18232597604944226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19288972818826827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17413965696113753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18659670425640132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501261853279899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17104737118767308,0.0,0.0,0.14587068871095796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42143591547685455,0.0,0.11628819637262253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464326692785718,0.0,0.0,0.18893218210762386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494496803596313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168703258779893
mentalhealth,coffeeismymuse,2020/01/20,"i need some advice on what to do hello this is my first time posting here.
i am a senior in high school and i dropped all of my classes from this semester because i was not able to attend. i am going through some mental health issues right now. i’ve been battling with depression and anxiety for approximately 3 years. because of my problems i was failing all of my classes. 

i went to the doctor and got prescribed antidepressants. i am doing a little bit better now, but i am anxious for next semester. 
anyway, i have about 2 weeks before the next semester starts. i want to know what can i do to prepare myself and not repeat what happened this semester. 
thank you for reading.",3.0983846153846173,5.619234838461537,4.376153846153844,81.49884615384616,77.53846153846155,6.461538461538463,27.69230769230769,7.61054688173877,1.918,539,23,94,8,13,177,83,130,0.096,0.851,0.053,-0.5005,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,3,5,6,1,0,4,0,13,2,0,0,2,16,22,5,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,1,1,0,3,2,4,0,1,5,0,18,2,17,17,5,21,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,2,11,74,24,7,0.17808584699791782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17402342859822673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623518551100866,0.2011863169866248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171189587937186,0.0,0.1515379391528179,0.0,0.0,0.15750245967680682,0.19442362109173725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338507906755874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18227841054583105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15147973048123178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121029083887126,0.0,0.14243152029596415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574807263627172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892969276891462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881574749447772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18587535611022146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787132416280474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784888035225914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17946864753566713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320483990313823,0.0,0.0,0.3787926372443417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17055701394908576,0.0,0.0,0.17040410455802582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17813403955727694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520843402916853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802323847115049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260500791079504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16395752132756067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384328951293087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503964660456656,0.0,0.14284972448903252,0.0,0.0,0.16508736433282345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468144669281408
mentalhealth,Maarten2706,2020/01/20,"I made my first step to overcome my overthinking Note: this post got really long, but the title explains most of it and I wanted to share my accomplisment. 

I struggle a lot with overthinking, mostly about social events. When I’m at school, or at work or just any place with a lot of well known people around I really quickly say yes to hangout plans or ask if I may come as well. I usually regret doing this right after, because I start telling myself they can have a far better time with other people/without you. Most of the time I keep it at that and just don’t mention anything about it anymore, hoping my friends will forget I said yes. However, if they remember, I try to be truthful and say something like: “I don’t think I add something,” or, “It’s better for you to spend your time without me or something.”

Anyway, to give some context. I was at school with friends and they made plans to do something, but I wasn’t really taking part in the conversation. They did invite me to hang out with them, which felt really nice because it had been a while since we as a group hanged out. Later that day, I was put into a group chat with all the people that would come, but I noticed I was added later then everyone else. This already made me start thinking they didn’t want to have me there, but one of them quickly remembered (and in my head probably regretted) to invite me as well. I really didn’t think I should go, but I said to myself, just go and have a good time. When I cycled to my friends house I constantly said to myself, “Why are you going, they don’t want you there. They just wanted to be nice. It was a gesture, not a real invitation.” etc. I then stepped off my bike and wanted to call my friend that I wasn’t coming. After standing in the freezing cold for 10 minutes, still overthinking if I should go and also overthinking if I should call or just don’t go without saying anything, because “they won’t even notice that you’re not there. And if they notice, they’ll just be glad you didn’t show up”, I finally got back to cycling and had a great night. 

It was an real eyeopener for me and my first step to overcome my overthinking. 

TLDR: Struggle a lot with overthinking. Got invited to hang out with friends. Started to overthink a lot, which in the past would have stopped me from hanging out, but overcame my weird mindset and just went to my friends. Ended having a great night and also showed myself I shouldn’t overthink everything so much.",5.3014549591754765,5.9620699834024915,5.578850220853969,82.75836634988623,68.04564315352697,8.377031187257396,29.44880203453353,8.360895534625662,2.0204787043233843,1940,67,376,26,31,617,206,482,0.036000000000000004,0.774,0.191,0.9978,2,0,4,0,0,0,56.0,1,6,12,7,27,26,0,2,20,2,40,1,1,3,2,101,77,41,0,19,28,0,2,1,6,10,0,6,0,0,18,32,0,2,8,5,1,17,15,5,3,3,25,9,70,21,61,39,12,71,0,2,0,0,44,19,0,21,34,282,88,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255350461732697,0.10515578431808777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04471024858605045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520340687512681,0.0,0.0,0.10820844033377904,0.05852881371500467,0.06146461658313965,0.0,0.0,0.05055542315353107,0.0,0.12023637437740504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162958457567951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427017809273453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990578588984545,0.0,0.0710492040201419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04240140815467952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492322382684947,0.0,0.05823237157246361,0.0,0.07332534023654658,0.043425306472763214,0.0,0.0,0.06282412383614544,0.05908920917698447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063127478547646,0.07202267962266455,0.0,0.1118488143453442,0.0,0.0,0.3047760465854853,0.0,0.0,0.06307056132945611,0.18682781838058804,0.05514550622149715,0.15775176606036634,0.144972709541602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747544136005959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530165561160732,0.0,0.07586326837220361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05843899896536822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03212068763520979,0.0,0.0,0.05818407034175595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235831632111826,0.0,0.18663434532016734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04833164672808412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339830526061883,0.0,0.0,0.2245603566992687,0.0,0.0,0.0445519026505833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119764818439273,0.06276299869195905,0.09116145233694964,0.0,0.06869167374005118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296749977004729,0.0,0.07088644002377713,0.0,0.0,0.06609394474200582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14966907360123946,0.2105962190085069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895718213591247,0.05614762149390819,0.18762150151806614,0.1568540792430084,0.0,0.13307904940531576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05438663920002312,0.0,0.0,0.06702083778919272,0.0,0.2024611649080087,0.0,0.0,0.13960830123844087,0.0,0.05250567908668737,0.054967477787081054,0.0,0.1374661838226942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0494335993048069,0.0,0.0574658196489165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12638416473825032,0.0,0.0,0.15335053439616053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044637931223892514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241108694002557,0.0,0.1938965677891532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17734348165360733,0.06094817407373174,0.05932648635691685,0.0,0.0,0.19013343013367495,0.0,0.047864635468893066,0.0,0.0,0.09340963593934876,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Winterfell153,2020/01/20,"Is it healthy to use distractions to suppress negative/self loathing thoughts? Whenever I'm not really thinking of anything I get rushed with self loathing thoughts and they dont seem to stop until I distract myself, either with my phone or forcing myself to think of something particular like listing everything I'm going to do today or thinking about hobbies I enjoy. This works to some degree but I feel like im not facing my problems ""head on"" and just pushing them away for a short time. 

Is this healthy or should I try something else? I feel like maybe if I do this long enough everything will just pass, almost like a ""fake it till you make it""",7.382787456445995,7.516684723577239,6.612450638792101,78.95121951219512,63.55284552845528,9.304994192799072,37.083623693379785,8.841846274778883,3.1958696864111493,523,24,94,7,7,160,80,123,0.08900000000000001,0.73,0.182,0.9034,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,2,1,4,9,0,2,2,0,7,2,2,2,0,30,21,9,0,3,10,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,2,8,0,0,4,3,4,0,0,2,2,14,5,16,17,3,13,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,7,10,59,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590479527848644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13070573517966053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492285004413945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18615067952717398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13268429572742735,0.0,0.0,0.16411658314107724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854970833269295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062111756462033,0.2269401497097241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829835025561985,0.0,0.09026825367086977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16300811918801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17156651473298742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31039043378768605,0.0,0.0,0.14056189454918647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060220253233335,0.0,0.15956874261342388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15198139249782278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175226090185482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14459527662149174,0.3313941821656419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24455426326268706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279120506627076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053206407231362,0.0,0.2521907601045809,0.09261659384710204,0.0,0.1505547776771246,0.0,0.0,0.10783694136097216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13718041025980265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563205880743395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TiredOfSA,2020/01/20,"Is it actually possible to get rid of social anxiety? Read description please I've had social anxiety almost my whole life. When I started school when I was six I had it, I was always picked on because I couldn't stand up for myself. When I was like 12 it got even worse, I stopped talking at all and no one really cared about me. Every time someone disrespects me and I can't express my opinions I get angry and resentful in the long run. I've tried everything. ""Facing your fear"" like some people recommend is useless and only makes me feel worse. I've even bought books that are supposed to help me but the fear is so overwhelming when I get into the situation that I get stuttery, tense, and sometimes talk too fast and basically sound like I'm just talking gibberish. Every time anyone shows the slightest kind of dislike towards me I can't help but think of this for hours if not days. Thinking like ""they must think I was so stupid and you know what they are right"". Even though I know that is nonsense, it still affects me. I CANNOT stop thinking about it. I have no control over myself. It's like I know the thoughts are dumb and hurts me but I can't stop them. I know they are imaginary, but knowing that doesn't help. 
Is it actually possible to get rid of this mental disease? Because I'm going to be honest, I don't see the point in being alive if I'm going to be like this for the rest of my life. I feel like I have a lot of potential in life and I have a lot of dreams but it is all wasted because of this worthless mental disorder I have. It makes me weak and useless in everything I do.",2.5706683036190867,4.5524484582043385,3.878251307782645,87.09532507739941,76.80185758513932,6.931952599551617,25.379417102594207,7.873277556716777,1.4408224404825445,1264,46,256,20,29,414,154,323,0.195,0.667,0.138,-0.9698,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,2,4,1,15,21,3,3,9,0,32,5,1,5,3,49,61,24,0,4,9,0,2,7,0,1,4,1,0,0,18,11,0,4,12,4,1,3,10,11,0,2,9,4,44,10,28,47,7,31,0,5,1,0,15,12,1,7,22,173,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.17130772615639206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789205920070693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303423256523918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342923294274451,0.0,0.0,0.06137297722765131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605169616969867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949050317543908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844497089731874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056606374268234824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005955521241286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17391987138323953,0.0,0.14790520831066029,0.0,0.15776956641083895,0.0,0.0,0.19753823108728066,0.08876141142771612,0.06270510473116421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292890537615741,0.0,0.09976692634725358,0.0,0.07020014900222613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764973327791496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643880166214347,0.0,0.09396289576968117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140215424552514,0.2411889420613293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18599016305017385,0.3001704475424972,0.0,0.0,0.07767641230686938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924306488405228,0.0,0.0,0.11717842277293446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17690923711342038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059477309494084724,0.0667553813128933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06085080088609885,0.0,0.0,0.09634848229834088,0.08297392983340313,0.19790191544775373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779683101959856,0.0,0.056229681567096984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495772935089627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883104129959002,0.06994377944853372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986606176447422,0.0,0.17894719976402512,0.07436984447531055,0.0,0.08680981886768717,0.0,0.06212623664153391,0.0,0.0700956937738126,0.2201466712269792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116460268454628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22496577801232287,0.08623660385816695,0.06968201988417061,0.10236237570927076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959215864250779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979955074517476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788965310621934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GearAlpha,2020/01/20,"I want to help my girlfriend. To start this off, I'd like to say I'm in no position to truly help someone. I'm suffering from the same problems and not even a trained professional. I'm just using my knowledge from recent Personal Development classes and research.

My girlfriend isn't diagnosed with anything official but she does encounter hindrances in loving her own body. I want to help her open up to thoughts of acceptance or love instead of conformity to those around her. As I have my limits, I've come on here to ask advice from experience persons.

I've had my fair share of contributions to problems she is currently experiencing (my insensitivity even before we got together). I kept separating from her as a last resort.

She was born with a rectangular body structure and with wider shoulders than normal which is the main source of insecurity. In a sense of body mass, she nears the upper spectrum of the normal BMI at a short height. Currently, she's working hard on the weight loss aspect of her insecurity (taking on safe diets and exercising) but her bone structure cannot be changed either way.

How can I help her feel loved and help her try and love herself?

P.S.: We live in the Philippines.",6.110678251121076,7.757843506726459,6.566701233183861,72.80682315022425,66.847533632287,9.341816143497756,33.66844170403587,9.673873057562805,3.3878163677130035,974,44,167,21,16,316,134,223,0.095,0.687,0.218,0.9871,2,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,2,0,0,3,7,14,0,2,11,0,9,13,5,2,0,36,27,12,0,6,6,0,3,1,2,0,2,1,0,2,3,14,2,3,4,1,0,1,4,6,0,0,5,5,27,8,38,21,4,25,0,2,0,4,32,17,0,1,7,109,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176850504010333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910552196899812,0.10721028074260236,0.11258794397750573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247901762722664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4013194096361406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274014053744754,0.1037417632378505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222362501180864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105391117910832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15908879756040412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780589921933025,0.0,0.0,0.06089418981349575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963207125600624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078836861016485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4036161627353775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981683989455948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058837138845570784,0.0,0.10634392792934423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4347794134466915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23599616895089026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21031367934037112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304748940414632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891236786817452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577259930552927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204189755517147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524260228846299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09055010213246448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095609794327572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176562678316551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040148402365947,0.0,0.0,0.14206818247794373,0.09559355462378663,0.0,0.1466540975870151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767614924248493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mistyvision__,2020/01/20,"identity crisis? been feeling super anxious whenever im at work over the past week.. and even though i know there isn't anything to be anxious about, i can't help the feeling. and tonight i cried, which was really weird because i thought that i was fine. it felt like a dream - and that may tie in with this being my first day of not smoking weed. but the point of me writing this, is that i don't feel like myself right now. i don't really know who that is either. i've been struggling socially interacting with others, especially at work tonight.. its like whatever i say it doesn't feel or sound like me anymore.",5.011425619834711,5.811010008264468,5.424452479338843,83.11122417355371,68.75206611570248,8.694628099173555,30.827479338842977,8.841846274778883,2.348445454545454,485,19,97,8,8,155,80,121,0.11599999999999999,0.726,0.158,0.6339,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,4,5,8,0,1,4,0,14,0,0,0,0,19,22,6,0,0,4,0,5,4,0,1,0,2,0,0,12,5,0,0,8,1,0,0,6,2,0,1,6,7,12,6,10,13,1,13,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,11,64,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3910431226598618,0.17164044791116925,0.0,0.0,0.14242311910348895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550279575051576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901109443049536,0.11161681630641546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431211053034995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500406546965545,0.12364233263002712,0.16617580603068166,0.0,0.0,0.14721455145230672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160061955686705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18694694711291568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19023116876294888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382160213487429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652163548504003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16360853356462748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22174810238517012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780213740698733,0.0,0.13763342391768052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642462516643592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18093193664829094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17004189538999584,0.13739945922726193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882753850254614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519962641436645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_discussing_,2020/01/20,If I had a list to write down all of my regrets my pen would run out of ink by the end Does anyone have regrets like I dont mean one I mean lots I have a lot of them thankfully I have dealt with them have you?,-1.8709523809523816,-0.1042258163265295,0.5990816326530606,105.31318027210888,92.87755102040815,4.082993197278912,14.289115646258502,5.46131890053228,-1.323614965986395,161,3,45,1,6,54,35,49,0.106,0.782,0.11199999999999999,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,0,1,12,10,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,10,2,8,8,3,4,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,3,2,33,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931863561707998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417806928830493,0.0,0.3238064098701916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447083539277684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13497991556911054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4697788047949271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.601915271102398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18721928143365815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543680306139307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19626642050174625,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Typically_Nobody,2020/01/20,"Friend lies about being posesed OK so I've known this girl for 3 years and for the first 2 everything was fine but around 6 months ago she told me she had a multi personality disorder it was far fetched but I decided to believe her (if I had a problem like that I would want my friends to believe me) I took her word for it, then yesterday we were texting and out of the blue she says she needs to tell me something. She told me not to be mad and pretended she was really scared to tell me and like she was fighting something off saying things like ""she doesn't want me to tell you.""
Then she tells me her multi personality disorder is not a multi personality disorder but when she was born 3 children (who had supposedly died at the exact same time as her birth) had posesed her body. This is pretty obviously not true but I want to do my best to help her as she already struggles with anxiety and depression. So it any of you have any answers that would be nice and I will keep you updated :)",3.75931323283082,5.133839135678394,4.941788944723619,83.26179564489114,72.21608040201005,8.522747068676717,28.342043551088786,9.029198982220553,2.1757997319933002,784,30,163,16,15,259,110,199,0.16899999999999998,0.635,0.196,0.5605,0,0,2,0,2,0,13.0,1,3,0,2,5,16,2,2,6,1,21,1,1,0,3,34,29,18,1,8,8,0,0,3,2,3,0,2,0,5,9,10,0,1,3,1,0,1,4,6,0,1,13,3,36,10,21,10,2,18,0,1,1,0,39,5,0,1,15,115,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273379291720876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789285023660604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762494607577085,0.0,0.08865924397020057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317098872700996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611476203614728,0.12162449621821785,0.0,0.0,0.12873305308877764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982006553909167,0.0,0.12028055813595405,0.0,0.3984766204941907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415881933933216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985801012484438,0.0,0.0,0.17908014913614334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776818758185818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301266881696733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16986111070280244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250616454770516,0.0,0.0,0.08593456368620496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035847414548248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790672864857495,0.0,0.11089572068232527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424520935303856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843284747482391,0.11603096409810244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844303716877238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115846197204212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4051888329776156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699538942248234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757921975194252,0.0,0.0,0.22148499382353226,0.12876344403736856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20507335795653295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16465675425131732,0.0,0.0,0.0746324844279832
mentalhealth,HappinessQuest,2020/01/20,"I feel so hopeless I don't even know where to start with this one but I need some advice.

Since leaving school at 16 I feel like my life (and my mental state) has been in steady decline. I'm now approaching 20 and I'm male by the way.

Without wanting to bore you with every detail of my life, my situation is basically this: Since leaving school, I've lost pretty much all my friends as we've all grown distant from eachother, I'm in a relationship that is not fulfilling and making me miserable, I'm working a shitty job with shitty hours and I can seem to connect with any of my workmates, my financial situation is pretty dire and as I can only get part time work it's not getting any better.

I just feel so isolated and hopeless. I have no hopes and dreams, no goals anymore. I only really have 1 person I talk to apart from my parents. I have no drive or energy. I always feel so down and lethargic. I find it pretty much impossible to make connections with people and I just think I come off awkward and boring. I also have a lot of insecurity about the way I look, I just think I look about 12 and no girl is gonna find me attractive which is one of the reasons I've stayed in my shitty relationship.

There is a work's party tomorrow and I keep telling myself I'm gonna go, but honestly I just feel like the anxiety is going to be too much. I don't know what to do anymore.",3.1095213620301934,4.50434698233216,4.854380019274012,83.170635239319,73.8763250883392,7.830966912945713,26.2911982010922,8.438071523408619,1.7397575971731445,1088,38,223,19,22,370,148,283,0.201,0.653,0.146,-0.9491,2,0,0,0,0,2,24.0,0,1,0,6,15,15,0,3,8,0,19,2,0,3,2,51,51,21,0,3,10,1,5,2,1,2,2,0,0,3,7,18,0,1,13,1,0,6,9,8,0,2,2,7,35,7,30,46,8,23,0,4,2,0,10,8,0,5,7,143,42,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972782173555536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960937028020013,0.08283281652305345,0.0,0.0,0.13539358802136545,0.0,0.07615478039000728,0.0,0.19745189273661856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804307919853761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575272525023614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575123422719277,0.0,0.08387440076033614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516750518515972,0.1422357777393143,0.0,0.0,0.18197212720549324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691137899989636,0.0,0.10402058023413316,0.0,0.11315208245406146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887470699223046,0.09803579974852428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987871098743883,0.08848380405523719,0.0,0.0,0.10941915144961326,0.0,0.0,0.2108162223933949,0.0,0.0,0.14062893075304173,0.09726931265601203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16719232488578922,0.0,0.10866958991805337,0.08463307531735942,0.0,0.0,0.13289957945872855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032206723031868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21954010341394253,0.07381438790109307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349140777294413,0.15142313564472665,0.0,0.0,0.11053748217889324,0.10780196209169997,0.0,0.06901480371655327,0.08692242447958025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30383163530317525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377369533165864,0.10235304307750233,0.0,0.21375693214938493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014979849058575,0.0,0.0906257515648758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469606979577409,0.2237946933205048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704613573696299,0.10610608314368228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001378665757122,0.08701029134160301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757407286654965,0.0,0.0,0.05804787418294495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587166317527299,0.15803486598840008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959617691048416,0.0,0.2174187666278176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,melodicmisery,2020/01/20,"Nothing in Life Feels Real Anymore I feel as though this needs a sort of preface, over the course of this past year, I've been reading a lot of self help books at my library, and I can't really afford therapy though I'm looking into ones my insurance listed as accepting theirs. Overall, the books never gave any insight into how I feel. In many cases I feel at peace, but like a daze. I zone out constantly, and I'm aware that I'm not taking in the situations around me, I'm not present, and yet I'm hyper aware of the small details, like the time of day, and that I'm still me. Walking around in my daily life feels like I'm dreaming, and it's not a good dream. 

My personal relationships, like the ones with my family are crippling, and I don't register the words I'm speaking until it's too late. Yet on the flip side, I recently reconnected with a childhood friend that's been trying to get clean from black for the past five years, and she told me that whenever I'm around I inspire her to be a better person and she doesn't crave black when I'm there. So my less up to date connections are wilting, and my past ones are flourishing under my eyes, and it's so conflicting. I want so badly to have a better relationship with my parents and brothers, and as soon as someone I lost communication with comes back, they worship the ground I walk on. 

None of this feels real, and thusly it bounces off of me, rolling off like rain on a windshield, because deep down it doesn't effect me, and I just want to know why every single time something happens to me or around me, it ends in me feeling as though i'm dreaming and living in auto pilot. It's hard to function, it's hard to work, because for some reason I can't seem to stay present in my own life.  Whenever I think about my own feelings, it scares me, because a sense of apathy sets in over all aspects of my life, and find myself not even caring if I lose the roof over my head, and not caring if I have anything to eat. If anyone has any idea what's wrong with me, or has been through this, I'd like to know, because it's hard not to feel alone when I'm not even aware of my own life.",8.807972222222222,5.4792373477272776,8.666515151515153,76.46616161616164,63.02272727272727,11.595959595959597,36.944444444444436,9.150863307647796,3.0597474747474744,1683,55,357,20,18,549,208,440,0.098,0.778,0.124,0.8901,2,1,1,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,2,6,24,21,0,1,20,0,16,8,2,3,2,77,54,38,0,6,14,2,12,6,1,0,5,1,1,3,19,30,1,1,20,6,0,3,14,6,0,4,6,17,46,15,66,47,9,62,1,2,4,0,17,32,0,9,31,230,65,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140047729593715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689427551336264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794489137658563,0.05495528960315217,0.0,0.06467679782437559,0.2798640283415456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06043452566437139,0.06562334884981637,0.19164256571868166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390213717271184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602652092465963,0.0,0.0,0.06770243386617346,0.0,0.08493302352051467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050687123744319516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042206945203326,0.0,0.0,0.06961163678930575,0.0,0.0,0.10382220679041433,0.0,0.0662194822843365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409215305200402,0.0,0.35765888847553456,0.05614811836999407,0.0,0.0,0.07183419460819343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072212323400587,0.0,0.04106252269809348,0.0,0.0,0.06592156297251857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950109428275747,0.0,0.2112164251572406,0.0,0.08066090714353935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052680416665485584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872392712680167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638725875000527,0.0,0.0886583222934982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775690468202431,0.230384603687578,0.0,0.0694006205697369,0.0,0.0659998110000636,0.08792744226600524,0.08579547417556782,0.06681846166222719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968275939271073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05827702502355244,0.060617130734553035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541380015501974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977354769377666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727018943260044,0.0,0.2250827993489268,0.0,0.13725184074660146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786160374300241,0.17891610643328246,0.05034982127965927,0.08080851202961764,0.07760285221880504,0.16876273634510536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786870743062552,0.0,0.0,0.07154972549255949,0.08199148450004985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834381286378024,0.0,0.0,0.06659309235923283,0.060506092637743925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377156592832681,0.06276588370456603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059093484724594615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987996746116875,0.0,0.0,0.05036035418164269,0.2316568832161528,0.0,0.09165848319046783,0.0,0.0,0.07510066947292465,0.0,0.05336068876255379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271446164500084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091955399969091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057217927577737214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593104141722636,0.0,0.10122490825604008
mentalhealth,dontsweatitbaby,2020/01/20,"Need help getting out of an abusive living situation and getting intense mental health treatment (27 in PA) I know I have almost zero paths to take with the cards I've been dealt and I really need some help and some insight. I'm disabled and stuck in an abusive household. Mentally... I'll keep it short and just say I'm utterly fucked in the mental department and I need professional help and to get away from my shit family members. Is there anything I can do work wise or a way I can get some kind of assisted living/housing or whatever? Or kind of like a rehabilitation center for the mentally ill? I have no idea how any of this works and I'm not sure what to look for, all I can find is HUD which doesn't seem to be for me apparently? If you can direct me to a path I can take it would be much appreciated.",4.367636363636365,5.069040915151515,5.9218181818181845,79.32272727272729,70.15151515151516,9.151515151515152,28.93939393939393,9.339509955726095,2.3494848484848485,641,23,132,13,11,219,102,165,0.15,0.748,0.10300000000000001,-0.8803,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,2,3,7,2,0,8,0,15,4,1,1,2,33,33,13,0,5,6,1,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,10,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,2,2,13,5,19,28,5,9,0,0,1,1,6,7,2,9,1,83,18,3,0.0,0.3021241347816048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766895882202758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670174138264221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491845277019453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197868123690704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019200582158315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652915431512345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11786811903673396,0.26644586579710144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552242569344547,0.0,0.0,0.2563739081288667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392761347147587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332441968431987,0.0,0.2655352024457451,0.07006853950716989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062288169725128385,0.0,0.11258141986621194,0.0,0.10706463965725543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5139444521761283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372432647406452,0.28361029781301145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167728650175587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013900410116322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606768960943002,0.0,0.0,0.13087294671648625,0.0,0.14331099357541385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016359499254052,0.0,0.19172244745137693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120049465122814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18563740426588407,0.0,0.0,0.0905695937059382,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OtakuTightPants,2020/01/20,"Why do I find it so hard to ask for solitude? I've just come to sit in the toilets at work, rather than spend the last 10 minutes of my lunch having colleagues talk to me.

They are friends. I like them. We were even talking about something I was interested in. But a lot of the words were too hard to catch. At times what people were saying just sounded like mumbles. I know it's not them. Its me. I find socialising absolutely knackering and I can't keep up with how social this place is and my brain can't cope with more talking. I talk all day on the phone for my job as it is. 

I'm sure if I said something along the lines of, I'm sorry but please can we not talk for a few minutes, I'm a little tired? They'd probably understand. But I can't seem to make myself ask for that quiet time. I'm too scared. If I disappear on my lunch breaks, people get really concerned that I'm not okay or that I don't want to hang out with them. 

It seems like such a simple thing. Why am I such an idiot.",0.5536062042223193,2.5715424928909947,2.2992697113313234,95.66041684618702,83.7867298578199,5.352951314088756,19.069582076691088,6.574015621080383,-0.09794028436018908,770,20,180,8,22,253,124,211,0.107,0.8190000000000001,0.075,-0.7593,1,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,2,0,5,1,11,9,1,1,10,1,16,4,1,2,2,36,33,11,0,4,12,0,2,3,1,0,1,4,0,0,11,10,2,1,6,0,1,4,7,2,0,0,5,6,26,7,28,27,4,20,0,0,0,0,19,10,0,6,7,115,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364867017203269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411954491641987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895281746894656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157025716766722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835399947956005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23120403348115676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771947670476633,0.0,0.0660814875456813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22660558665772645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255136080984127,0.11242277984817448,0.0,0.0,0.06951105519217247,0.10309949742242043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18537776443048712,0.12676792900242426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753025026294984,0.0,0.0,0.08442754198314381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17537302260756074,0.0,0.13214649550819427,0.13883896611269694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636870552379945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102743984537424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031309646747745,0.10058335433086953,0.12663028423765899,0.0,0.0,0.23028844714662455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289322032446137,0.0,0.1947436418593228,0.0,0.14158595001129615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920754082167848,0.0,0.0,0.5083061481289529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402884629412154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14750503664715567,0.1453721511359082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167194944149174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460220585501352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282601903849146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208021135032428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,exile_surik,2020/01/20,how do i open up and talk to people? i'm not that great at talking to people about how i feel. i can never really say the right things and i always seem to mess up what i'm trying to tell someone. what's the best way to try and talk to someone about how i feel?,0.5957627118644098,1.822814677966104,2.812000000000001,95.91901694915256,80.18644067796609,5.397966101694917,16.884745762711866,5.6839178017228535,-0.6857688135593221,202,3,50,1,5,69,35,59,0.105,0.823,0.07200000000000001,-0.2392,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,3,1,12,7,6,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,5,2,11,7,1,7,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,1,33,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793876260698329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262477426616403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180169260819232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376880411586061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16627581255262994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989250473921129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381120706919711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841121437379519,0.0,0.17144531988534364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19626446517719148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3653363466150347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.51984770688191,0.18843461157777527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322799759791527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927420606961872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17112480678496084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BackwoodsWitch,2020/01/20,"Went into inpatient for 2+ weeks, feeling so disconnected Does anyone else struggle with depersonalization/dissociation? I’ve been dealing with the spacey feelings, feeling as if I’m watching myself in third person, and losing hours of my time to nothing at all. I felt very numb and emotionally disconnected after the holidays and began to lose days of my time. I checked myself in somewhere when I thought about just walking out into the street when a car was coming. I was so scared of my own thoughts and myself. I didn’t want to die, but I couldn’t continue on like that anymore. Anyone who has been through inpatient knows it can be a slightly traumatized experience, but also one to help stabilize you when you can no longer do it yourself. I got out a few days ago now, I honestly have begun to lose track of time again because of my thoughts trying to come back. 

I feel as though very few people noticed I was gone, a blessing in disguise. It’s kind of embarrassing to try to explain to anyone who hasn’t been through it before. But those that did reach out over the past two weeks, I feel an anxiousness about contacting them. I think of them being upset with me, and it makes me paralyzed with my worries and anxieties. How do I even begin to explain where I have been? I feel so bad for worrying anyone over me. It’s becoming a mental block towards my recovery and I’m very overwhelmed by the thoughts of the people I care about being upset with me. 

If anyone has suggestions on how to have this kind of conversation, when you don’t want to overwhelmed the other person with your problems, I’ll take them.",6.913672438672434,7.173079616883117,7.059307359307362,74.92761183261186,64.51948051948052,9.831457431457432,34.318903318903324,9.586721724236666,3.1890621933621928,1294,53,233,23,18,417,162,308,0.18100000000000002,0.727,0.09300000000000001,-0.9852,0,0,0,1,0,1,29.0,0,4,3,3,20,19,0,7,13,0,24,1,0,3,1,50,53,25,1,6,6,0,7,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,13,20,0,1,15,1,1,6,5,13,0,3,18,8,36,6,52,31,4,44,1,5,1,0,18,16,0,2,23,175,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855358249482698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716596078458916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381740084679297,0.10901039221392317,0.09569580162566832,0.3373531221395856,0.09886917793624472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419768348097716,0.08056819199610192,0.05882165151608047,0.10656968809242373,0.08210901431948045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838173740893556,0.0,0.0,0.16624152183445048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12446088135210848,0.0994807467354604,0.0,0.0,0.10014520512922462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444226935473158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060808758110073,0.1085424019552082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063733165380606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438933442068197,0.0,0.0,0.2927406225666877,0.0,0.09264906473052167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717481051219126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467767949564747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502683732146014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009666370959068,0.053030402828998825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047141937811713705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238552363317937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441028047769443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09724293357020923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258828810993072,0.10985869388102044,0.0,0.0,0.06538661463290317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211413574999816,0.13379313561715767,0.16850911833832036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233141970568368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660700682658996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087614503432048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725512383390531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061829253700295336,0.0948045503686593,0.30642081289582884,0.16879872182372835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102574899384156,0.0,0.0942603039755042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388521741356869,0.11382894469047745,0.0,0.1548028188739651,0.0,0.0,0.0894506077999347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195988031276446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ravenepl,2020/01/20,"I feel like I’m getting better. Where to go from here? I have been taking my medication regularly and increased my dosage for several months now. I few days ago, I just randomly started getting really happy. I had so much energy. Since then, I’ve been killing it at work and I’ve been actually making time for friends. I also have slowly been getting better at personal chores and errands. Last but not least, I decided to go back to school. Im nervous but I know that it’s time.

However, I do sometimes randomly get a few days out of every couple months where I feel like a normal person. I don’t want to look a gift horse in the mouth, but I’m so worried this isn’t going to last. For once.. I think it might. Idk it just feel different this time. I feel like I’m getting myself back.

I also don’t know myself anymore. I have been so depressed for so long. Now that I’m starting not to be, I need to get to know myself all over again. I’m not sure where to start with that.

Idk, has anyone else on here recovered from depression? If so, what did you do to improve your life and get yourself back?",1.4595205745341602,3.6568962991071454,3.327010869565221,88.55603260869567,81.54464285714286,6.395652173913044,22.685559006211186,7.586124646067393,1.043427251552795,857,29,178,14,23,287,119,224,0.113,0.758,0.13,-0.2866,2,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,2,0,3,20,12,1,1,4,0,18,3,1,1,2,33,49,16,1,4,9,0,4,3,1,1,2,0,1,2,10,6,0,0,9,0,0,4,6,4,0,0,7,5,23,8,24,40,6,34,0,2,1,0,5,9,0,4,24,116,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.10326338625421133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09380152908955357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16924569604926462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049433091382121,0.07399060854084423,0.10842334280233652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441031989681821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871753559766956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708592483298955,0.0,0.1364880854276186,0.0,0.1822822756857023,0.0,0.0,0.11055759043893333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839760271985131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915647295936867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21401962698078136,0.22678982186899016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817549481118288,0.0,0.3869998220764407,0.0,0.18041691782284194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264553704563933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430191136222873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170722592450666,0.0,0.1744648938595066,0.17251205893357968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474258741838698,0.15509241374562208,0.0,0.0,0.09364585645790303,0.08886071231249243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063453005274334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660079420217944,0.0,0.11225648302300907,0.0,0.0,0.16892629851167673,0.0,0.07778861852200304,0.07846292097777105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367945653447454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269302497200415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18479289789075334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778990600007777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709375852329107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119544547357812,0.0,0.0875339827179135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465699425848828,0.0,0.22469619023412185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973248571376847,0.0,0.07956218458943476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780408727058118,0.0,0.0,0.18511048703866145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062414368909602586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703697517554152,0.10746360971031793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Link24DaPast,2020/01/20,I feel alone and want to give up Why should I keep trying? Why should I not just give in to my depression? Why not just say good bye?,-1.2387931034482729,0.7990471034482773,0.2581896551724157,106.12452586206899,95.20689655172414,4.279310344827587,10.698275862068963,5.985473137389443,-1.5927999999999995,102,1,27,1,4,32,20,29,0.271,0.6890000000000001,0.040999999999999995,-0.8098,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,10,7,1,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,4,1,4,5,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588117060641041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21523074651488727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635239468739082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4794364225188455,0.0,0.20959670933257984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221145968020217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19872334790482174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696595812968472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739218240649846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6764632606723603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Av_Inash,2020/01/20,"Physical barriers I have been dealing with anxiety and mild depression in a On & Off manner for roughly 3 years now. I have been working under a new manager under which I have moved recently (around 1.5 months) and honestly me being a fresher am getting to learn a lot of things which takes time for me - the reason which at least I feel is it has been very hard for me to concentrate on anything because of my panic attacks - If i have it somewhere in the morning then I can be rest assured that my entire day is wasted. Plus me being an MBA grad has raised my manager’s expectations that I would know everything which is not the case. Therefore I am mostly unable to even ask him any queries since he thinks that I should know these things. All of this has led me to take up a lot of stress and obviously I overthink it to the next level. It is now getting really stressful. i am shying away from work. On certain days I feel really dizzy and also puke N number of times. My body feel really weak and cold and even walking or sitting seems like a task. Obviously my heart rate is quite fast at that point to make me feel that i would most certainly die now. Plus since I feel this way for most of the days - I am unable to even get a proper sleep - that is now like a luxury to me which I can’t afford. Also I am unable to have my meals properly because of it and all my routines and cycles are basically messed up now. 
Is there someone else who has or is going through the same who can help me in dealing with this? Like what do you guys do?",6.6744091639871375,5.629236623794212,7.1295317524115775,78.56767383440517,65.39871382636656,10.34734726688103,32.299236334405144,9.516144504307137,2.6904162379421224,1214,40,247,20,16,399,167,311,0.127,0.804,0.069,-0.9618,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,3,12,14,1,3,15,0,37,5,3,4,7,49,54,16,1,5,4,0,7,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,25,13,1,1,11,0,0,4,2,7,0,0,3,8,34,7,41,45,10,40,0,1,0,0,10,17,0,9,20,186,59,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767107368352861,0.0,0.11971120172126945,0.0,0.07513405965220668,0.0,0.08452125239077919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092031098041127,0.09835569069969496,0.1032892080653397,0.12569342551204807,0.10380494512059764,0.0,0.0,0.13470210537896754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227246972104711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137623943311209,0.2278117952243324,0.09516116510004796,0.0,0.1146667054292699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229661891402463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21892427374858606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929741630849312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793244293933057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17317264269121532,0.0,0.06279156522193126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10939820616379156,0.0,0.0,0.09897347892626324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309260776437521,0.07405623078015816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144009435382963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619331856012123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878619696064409,0.0,0.0,0.07375005771491623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818862570120167,0.11742880600657635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067077703480864,0.1175027874634882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296311547391976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444469159488157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117515133983349,0.0,0.0,0.21233989139283485,0.1135976933110954,0.109091292303304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058202494828558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18278981321577786,0.0,0.11056548399930513,0.0,0.09361416876094628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25312197505566264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16614298137225986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14680356950689294,0.07079477057154095,0.0,0.0,0.12885019166068448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116226735440892,0.0,0.08769840006328232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16086980011437327,0.0,0.0,0.15697173200123118,0.0,0.0,0.07114916358872482
mentalhealth,spacepeanutbutters,2020/01/20,"My mental health is deteriorating with every passing day I'm severely lacking in motivation lately, I haven't been doing anything but laying in bed all day. My bf basically lives with me (been together 4 years) and he hasn't been helping at all with anything. Our room is a complete disaster, I can't remember the last time I could actually walk in it. But he refuses to help me clean it at all so it's been stressing me out for months. He also won't get a job and for a while I was the only one working but it was a temporary position so now I'm back looking for somewhere to work. I really want to get myself in a better mental state before I put more stress on myself but I really need the money. 

I'm staying up all night and sleeping all day. Either barely eating or over eating. I haven't interacted with my family in weeks because I'm ashamed of myself and can't even look at them. I feel like I annoy my friends because they'll ignore me for days. I just feel like I have nobody to talk to anymore, even my bf doesn't care that much. He says he does but every time I'm having issues he ignores me or tells me to stop being dramatic.

I don't know what to do and I don't even know how to talk about how I feel. I can't talk to my family because they're the type to say suck it up there's nothing wrong with you. I wasn't taught how to express my feelings or how to voice how I feel or what I'm thinking. Everyone in my family keeps to themselves. 

Honestly I'm just lost, I feel like I don't have an identity. I don't know who I am anymore",2.605823170731707,3.7604663262195146,4.8164341463414635,83.89929756097561,74.76219512195122,7.808975609756097,25.62,8.364918446050245,1.5966822926829265,1217,41,259,21,25,425,158,328,0.134,0.758,0.10800000000000001,-0.8732,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,1,2,5,17,16,2,3,10,0,30,4,1,6,5,54,58,23,0,4,12,0,6,3,3,2,1,3,3,0,9,11,2,5,12,0,1,3,13,9,0,1,9,11,43,7,38,45,9,36,0,1,2,0,25,15,1,4,19,170,52,6,0.0,0.0,0.09134256877065987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485391091311265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856571197148172,0.0,0.0,0.15405381654118513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719745692631042,0.0,0.17117770390903406,0.0,0.07964886046311415,0.0,0.0,0.08278383290368227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954340195159784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814047379557722,0.0,0.0,0.07473400518520268,0.0,0.0,0.2414635580293012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191220640957114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915575159869256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854707685268649,0.0,0.15772834027721006,0.08944123044339829,0.0,0.0,0.2647204098850661,0.0,0.2839695153077416,0.20060900239661766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231708392617138,0.0,0.09780691919268522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949511431856267,0.0,0.0,0.12547960810204598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09769672456364126,0.0928860697663434,0.08319823109631297,0.0,0.0,0.15432451078252285,0.07629855643178657,0.105587732980685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13718840706513608,0.0,0.08265275051283716,0.0,0.15720510472960866,0.0,0.10217822065493172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18865867313474485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471264791273767,0.0,0.06880863096459723,0.06940509134297942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783963534394577,0.0,0.0898141537967149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342749804287844,0.07118894337337578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409639771500992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992835748239168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603342187760163,0.0,0.0,0.14887298053585535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574421810366524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367013049199782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976784475271636,0.0,0.07825590788133042,0.2144427679980594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257025085315717,0.08181273854678651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05997672291317392,0.0,0.0,0.10916077812177892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05520919845072585,0.0,0.07508230504274795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13628751599395753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233967462048027,0.0,0.060276961640164675
mentalhealth,josephswollin,2020/01/20,I just need help Idk what I’m gonna do I’m so tired but I’ve only been able to sleep a few hours the past few nights. I’m so sick and hungry but just even looking at any kind of food makes me sick. I have to go to work tomorrow and I just don’t know how I’m gonna make it.,-3.1066339869281023,-1.5584041470588232,0.02431372549019884,108.345522875817,97.8235294117647,3.610457516339869,10.496732026143787,5.033348758259628,-2.023328758169934,210,2,64,1,9,73,46,68,0.22399999999999998,0.748,0.027000000000000003,-0.9376,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,0,2,0,4,5,1,3,0,12,16,7,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,5,13,2,6,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,4,30,6,1,0.26038249747138265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770690271768388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17198018385402822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148555495017839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14798137382999574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17452889942758398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256424309949379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711483023781925,0.14309941101967716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21865571886823024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476146779307538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19307032258038476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24435133508277498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19803262261169408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485645567301488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605705425970325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992713770306066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18956155929974425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cakefed,2020/01/20,"People who are battling mental ilness on their own because mental health is still taboo in your country or because you don't have the money to afford treatment, raise your hand!✋ I want this to be a thread to be about those who literally can't pay for either therapy or medication, have no real place to go and address their issues, or who have been failed by the system & decided to deal with their issues ""at home"". 

All of you who find yourselves in this particular position, how do you manage to stay sane? Is it meditation? Prayer? Natural supplements? Physical exercise? Journaling? All of the above? Please share your story.",4.4803162055335966,7.1893236086956565,5.212490118577076,76.31233201581028,73.78260869565217,8.355731225296443,26.976284584980235,9.095868883498916,2.6749130434782606,505,19,83,12,11,163,84,115,0.063,0.847,0.09,-0.3085,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,6,3,1,3,3,1,0,4,0,12,3,0,1,2,14,14,5,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,8,2,0,1,2,1,2,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,10,1,16,11,4,9,0,1,0,0,15,5,0,3,1,61,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22137773547316505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490998889284833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106421897687734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18674233285349628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11611824387171715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171797613798876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20494693524943672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4265084064408104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20582820891955564,0.4118076138137152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164790669179195,0.0,0.21346811712629996,0.2242790666968673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23255784576308666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177750823764632,0.16316807908172748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336546667230338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051165152806385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,perma_1,2020/01/20,"Quickly spiraling- Hey community, so recently (about 6ish months) I feel like my life is speeding up on a spiral downhill. 

Little background: I was always known for balancing and maintaining/managing my spending, time considerations and general life. 

As of late, I’m feeling myself turning more and more reckless with my livelihood (going 130mph on the interstate to work) and financial stability. For example, there’s been times where I would impulse buy and sell things sometimes running out of funds before the next paycheck.  Additionally to cover the leap in expenses I’ve increased my hours at my job to 37hr/week while also taking 18 credit hours in university. I want to attend university as I’m already in debt for that but I keep accumulating more. Overall my time dedications and spending has surpassed what can be balanced.",8.011666666666667,9.910486833333335,8.135722222222224,62.38150000000002,62.611111111111114,10.76,40.09444444444443,10.793553405168565,5.103999444444447,680,37,96,18,10,221,107,144,0.028999999999999998,0.9059999999999999,0.066,0.2551,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,4,0,7,2,0,0,0,18,16,12,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,9,0,1,4,0,8,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,12,2,21,12,4,26,0,0,0,0,1,10,0,0,13,63,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21521275460409084,0.15595984043095212,0.16227477747798202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16595022780778187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19721899966837936,0.13932448606061296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083607785021284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3841167850338682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935302570340317,0.17334542293962404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21999446369940973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755010562578799,0.09527839767646692,0.19546430267764173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556655157292962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074091966475052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19256170671608305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928827557279301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14663304181506975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295646302257814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3411584778172669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121290459339976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502963139348316,0.0,0.1564357048390875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14197908290871286,0.0,0.0,0.13853875952031966,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mruczega01,2020/01/20,"I fall in love with literally anyone who gives me attention I think that the title above is the best shortest summary of it but I will go on anyway.

It really doesn't take much, a few words and a few minutes. You don't have to say much or even compliment me. Just look at me and ask me what my name is. There doesn't need to be anything more. Any sign of genuine interest in me and who I am is all it takes for me to pay attention to you for months. I become aware of you and your existence and start thinking about it. For example I have a crush on a girl I didn't see for almost two years - I wasn't even friends with her.

It's odd because as soon as anyone notices or talks to me I want to run. I panic but try to remain calm and normal. 

I also know that this isn't real love. It's some kind of a desperate obsession because I truly love attention despite how much it terrifies me.

I do what I can to remain rational. But why am I like this in the first place? Is it my shitty relationship with my mum? My lack of a relationship with my dad? The fact that I don't think anyone I have ever been friends with has ever really liked me as a person? Does it have anything to do with the fact that my life took a complete 180 degrees turn in a flash and I became so alone? Not even realising that it was an issue. That anything was an issue, that everything wasn't ok?

Honestly at this point I think I'm just a mess. Not just because of this but because of other things. I can't talk to people, I don't know how. I panic and don't know what to say. Sometimes I just feel so depressed and while all of that sucks I think the impact of time is what plays the biggest part. I don't even know when this started, it has been years. I tried to get help but there is always something in the way, and when there isn't, it's always the fear that stops me. Do I even need to speak to a professional I ask myself? Am I wasting resources. I know it's not rational but I can't get a hold of myself whenever I try to make that phone call.

I don't think much about any of this, I try to avoid it. I forget about my anxiety untill I have to speak to another human being.  I forget about so many things. I even started having memory issues recently. I can't even point out all the things wrong with me because my mind is blank 99% of the time. Just someone sitting next to me on a bus makes it hard to breath. I don't know how I will get a job, how I will live on my own. 

However despite all this I love myself so much most of the time. I look in the mirror and I couldn't be happier to be me. Not because of my appearance but because I like who I am as a person despite the flaws I have. Yet at the same time maybe I am insecure on some level? I can't really tell but I probably am.

I don't even know why I wrote this. Maybe it's a rant or maybe I just want advice. TBH writing about myself and getting this out is just nice. 

Thanks for reading ^^ and sorry for the spelling errors and stuff too lazy to check properly but I did correct a frew mistakes.",1.3239035977367308,2.996017311145515,3.3485299455535404,90.89315789473686,79.44891640866872,6.56043557168784,21.66424682395645,7.503015589744147,0.6780051030212446,2357,68,532,34,58,799,245,646,0.16399999999999998,0.7390000000000001,0.096,-0.9914,2,2,1,0,0,0,58.0,0,4,0,2,40,30,1,6,35,1,59,6,1,6,9,104,106,43,0,8,23,2,2,3,2,3,1,4,0,4,47,23,0,3,17,2,2,5,24,11,0,2,10,9,87,19,75,88,20,50,0,1,3,4,38,21,1,8,25,391,134,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605319039139675,0.0,0.0,0.06202893558161715,0.06415630321834044,0.0,0.04953736698154474,0.1030863481465827,0.0,0.0,0.08424940221428417,0.06495469799953801,0.04738772948838421,0.0,0.0,0.1299400816931396,0.0,0.15292628705332098,0.0,0.11582036262878966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643275345229917,0.06841334824923816,0.0,0.0,0.06500742018381186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632527362140844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494811836615129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335310850235935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05420845724265492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.327312526948808,0.112065536442844,0.0,0.0,0.055672141264150085,0.0,0.0,0.06970530854806152,0.03132123608010163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05269035648971837,0.0,0.0,0.09571705424033816,0.0,0.1294547523376923,0.05942325593537274,0.03520475173666179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05549052236232275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04152040500907603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939633522911708,0.06147082055378185,0.0,0.0,0.0645061498077987,0.2383033334369796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04375356146152246,0.09078954437380904,0.0,0.054698539919191214,0.0,0.10403634051134936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22363100146401604,0.0,0.08269749171696945,0.06280247294235425,0.18669613314286496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254675720012942,0.0,0.04944388092309935,0.0,0.2276833876821411,0.0918628148697712,0.0,0.0,0.06587917415973288,0.0,0.06069291458141868,0.0,0.07052475443271017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14535814177590511,0.0,0.06708036175479333,0.0,0.042944839870395005,0.10817591007729677,0.06471930522327228,0.0,0.11711603062653896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678715044055059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061961729251884486,0.0705069328601557,0.11905059435695588,0.0,0.0611631808921373,0.1330114225933885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985222466064782,0.0,0.0,0.04936211791147841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05248576872729386,0.04768826123354741,0.06126515536630313,0.06934231799994905,0.13153489742796975,0.0,0.0,0.051788765341749664,0.0,0.0,0.07091216594037243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314981066846123,0.0995780345777952,0.05414263067512457,0.05703060218337355,0.0,0.0,0.12346044887429028,0.2381509981555169,0.0,0.0,0.1444824314413282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882313654836049,0.16822626313326355,0.06737833513320203,0.060511230889242575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307349184694223,0.04916903076102902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179139389986682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772709610766017,0.0,0.07978105439987804
mentalhealth,misspurple99,2020/01/20,"Hey, has anyone told you're doing great today? ☺️  You're doing a great job and you are loved. If anyone ever needs a talk, my messages are always open!",-0.061875000000000575,2.182736562500004,2.2800000000000007,92.965,89.625,3.2,11.125,3.1291,-1.5845875000000005,118,1,24,0,4,40,24,32,0.0,0.659,0.341,0.9245,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,1,5,8,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,7,0,3,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,1,2,12,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22958850145060086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38586096892773375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24958647812012116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6084080867549879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738091673169705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24902961171451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045920374926376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22177496969437446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615409888035347,0.2636544843927273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SadisticSienna,2020/01/20,"Need advice about what to do about autistic/antisocial boyfriend after he just vomited all over the shops So we went out to dinner and he ate his own meal and half of mine. Which was apparently far too much food for his stomach to handle.

I asked and insisted he go to the toilets multiple times incase he was going to vomit but he just wouldn't. 

After which point he laid on a bench near woolworths and vomited all over the floor then casually walked off. I was absolutely horified and told staff so they could get it cleaned. Then asked him if he felt ok and yet again suggested he go to the toilets incase he needs to vomit more.

He wouldn't and instead projectile vomited into a bin in the shopping center. Yet again refusing to go to the toilets then vomited one time more in the corner of the car park.

Im like wtf??? You could of gone to the toilet.

I just feel disgusted like he has no etiquitte of any sort. Its absolutely disgusting. People have to clean that. Its so anti-social and disgusting. I feel like he needs counselling of some sort to correct disgusting behaviour like this. 

He didnt even think there was anything wrong with his actions. He didnt care at all and wasnt ashamed at all.

He also has really bad road rage and aggression towards other people.

Not sure what I should do. If I should just leave or what. Or insist on intensive counselling for his antisocial behaviours",3.02459871589085,5.672865947565544,3.9506514178705214,83.72254213483146,78.66292134831461,7.409791332263242,25.266051364365968,8.418075326091056,1.9760006420545744,1116,42,206,24,28,358,150,267,0.182,0.738,0.08,-0.9888,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,1,1,0,18,17,6,1,11,1,18,11,1,0,6,47,37,22,0,11,10,0,3,4,0,4,6,0,2,0,11,14,4,1,4,3,2,9,7,9,0,2,12,3,15,8,37,19,9,39,0,0,0,0,28,19,0,7,15,139,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15220601480422188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456051643231683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592154658557884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817648879437468,0.0,0.2912275129155517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300523637756186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15880680930513266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24872197504094834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287743342994787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15751298783762346,0.11127435041882038,0.14955318682573404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18834455288995636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137771438179188,0.0,0.3540860020940379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682465839998177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16492642412071978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043841641958757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450087915779865,0.3464802539475281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554641455409523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159675315142373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14724271944832604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978328427105182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14680113250229546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980415837797213,0.0,0.0,0.1816487973859551,0.0,0.0,0.14883451937873204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439026987362633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702981523175061,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AntiqueKangaroo,2020/01/20,"Constantly descending into strange foggy states where the borders of my personality are incredibly ambiguous  

I have periods of clarity where I grow a lot in a day or two and then a massive downward spike into confusion and I lose myself completely. I've accepted this pattern but I've found out I can accept and embrace it as much as I want, it is actually a problem. I tell myself its my unique little thing I have to deal with, everyone has them and that's okay. I also can completely disconnect with the world, control my thoughts so much that I only think certain things and the world becomes a magical harmless place. But this isn't life and those methods come at a rather large cost.

I'm the crazy guy at this point and honestly I don't really care, its the only way I feel okay and stop myself from hurting others, or as least thinking I am. I have been to so many strange places in my mind and I've trimmed off the physical world to only what I thought was absolutely essential. I will ignore people, ignore social constructs, ignore pain, ignore literally anything I need to in order to have stability for an extended period of time. It killed me at first to do this because I would be hurting others, but I figured they'd get used to me like this and I'd just be known as that guy, plus I was harmless enough right? I have no choice to ignore my mixed feelings and doubts because my quality of life was my excuse.

I've tried millions of things to fix this ""problem"". Including not seeing it as a problem but something to learn from and adapt to but unfortunately to no avail. I've of course done the typical google search but few people have posted what seems similar. I read piece on disassociate disorder which seemed eerily similar but I'm extremely hesitant to suggest I have anything wrong with me at all without the opinion of others.

I've done some research on the spectrum and I feel that is a possibility, I have brought this up with a few friends and family but they are adamant that's not the case. Although they are not professionals of course. My councillor who I saw twice was not much help because on 1/2 days I had clarity. On the day I was confused she agreed with my suggestion that the spectrum was a possibility but I was forwarded onto a doctor and as I felt clarity that day she sent me away with a referral to more sessions but essentially wrote me off as a silly teenager who will figure it out eventually and left me with a few half hearted responses about managing yourself through your actions; diet, meditation and exercise. She didn't buy any of it and instead changed the topic to getting an sti check. That kinda hurt because it took a lot for me to put myself in that position. It left me with little hope for the future and a forced outlook on being content. I turned 21 recently.

Apologies if this is unclear or confusing, I don't really know if this makes any sense. I'll inevitably read this tomorrow and be confused myself. I've tried not to answer my own thoughts and questions in this post but apologies if I've fallen into that habit again.

I really appreciate any insight and thoughts on any of this. Thank you to anyone that uses their time to read this.",6.6004395749746525,7.064591938009793,7.118007142542214,73.53865790749968,65.18270799347472,10.346439751333717,35.490895463163,10.219675759033578,3.7002196464000696,2570,116,459,57,37,844,292,613,0.163,0.748,0.08900000000000001,-0.9944,0,0,2,0,0,0,44.0,0,2,5,3,10,34,1,5,32,2,42,7,1,4,2,118,76,52,1,11,25,0,4,1,1,3,5,0,0,3,46,37,1,7,23,4,3,9,12,20,0,5,23,6,65,14,78,45,15,69,0,4,2,0,28,40,0,22,18,339,111,9,0.0,0.0,0.07268315558884834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05956279231638096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20259977276297994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207916482080724,0.0,0.12258378177246405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997777835530884,0.0,0.0,0.1816128135948014,0.0822589148703791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075938806870703,0.0,0.07879150305477069,0.0641591780799934,0.1561847761114963,0.08048799237700076,0.08353728459552585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921375060224708,0.07678710919991649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536219971665678,0.07623492480974081,0.0,0.1524407748833702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695925272657386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117022168160986,0.0,0.0,0.07021448669615356,0.0,0.1129801840553894,0.0,0.07151387664641233,0.0,0.0,0.06335388721492573,0.0,0.0816650705623325,0.057544187047497086,0.0,0.07782697181635767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749669997906767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826088228880027,0.04992334900175392,0.0,0.0,0.07397689012226714,0.0,0.0,0.23920181276254646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240269414465516,0.0,0.04093305957759152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184863665693902,0.0,0.10521690809305934,0.036387876503076184,0.14929996893410555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332569605420917,0.0,0.12664293839988494,0.0,0.0,0.04971694928859022,0.0755125046152369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520503684748409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16425731718184106,0.05522705481828286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699395074076831,0.0792535190036786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327212502891127,0.06503433325362228,0.15563453492836524,0.0,0.07040904910959728,0.16793329798433584,0.14266528981953372,0.0,0.0,0.21380607927211415,0.0,0.07487443376638478,0.08343627500867704,0.0,0.2235048309512758,0.0,0.14314418102736146,0.0,0.0735414508858503,0.0,0.0,0.06360675524960482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05935207615199765,0.13561023783948128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592446327122095,0.0,0.05733946256855599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062269831085726236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510007420391159,0.06857251647613699,0.0,0.0,0.14844650662046974,0.09544941732813876,0.0,0.23651982110194694,0.08686147025650033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275163656395236,0.10113603713435572,0.08101443469245287,0.07275755854378152,0.0,0.0,0.12865612554514386,0.0,0.0,0.043931091657876134,0.05911991181743656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179746433600122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052909488354671234,0.08143377828609699,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sworcan,2020/01/20,A loved one is struggling and I feel helpless Just recently I have moved out of my house to go to college and I feel like a complete piece of shit for doing it . My father is 48 years old. He has struggled with bipolar disorder and depression for the greater part of his life . He has all ways been able to manage it but in the past months he has fallen into a slump. He is morbidly obese and a smoker and puts no care into his health. Heart disease runs in my family so this concerns me greatly .He is engaged to a very loving woman who I believe is perfect for him she’s very caring and empathetic of his struggles but she has two kids of her own which has prevented them to be able to live together because of location . This means my father lives alone . I believe he is very lonely living by himself. Every time I see him he seems completely disconnected from life almost as if he’s on auto pilot his house is always a mess and he  doesn’t put any effort into his appearance. He is very intelligent and well employed but normally works from home so he barley leaves the house. I really want help him and for him to start taking care of him self but I feel like any time I suggest something such as light exercise to get out a little he seems completely put off by the idea of it .  It’s like he’s just given up on life. I feel like a horrible son for leaving him to go to school. Every day im worried that I’m gonna get a call that he’s had a heart attack or hurt himself . I want to be there for him as much as I can but I don’t know what do .,2.5706470165348665,4.058229286604361,4.223130841121498,86.77468188353704,75.44859813084112,7.181452192667147,24.495686556434226,7.882392219407189,1.2524544931703807,1215,39,255,18,26,408,172,321,0.129,0.6940000000000001,0.17600000000000002,0.9639,1,3,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,3,7,23,2,3,14,0,23,12,3,0,2,41,49,22,0,4,9,3,4,4,0,1,7,0,1,3,11,15,1,1,9,1,0,9,3,10,1,2,3,6,36,13,45,43,6,31,0,4,1,2,44,12,1,6,13,161,47,5,0.15937055188343274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797932933413673,0.08252991405378686,0.0,0.0,0.0663045330378708,0.0,0.0,0.10837744032982413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065350512364533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048575404602079084,0.0,0.0,0.1795560369574748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813675760844481,0.0,0.2437333487034835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506454872472137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051390410784005816,0.0,0.06863281140462167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132622983775578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427656355733247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512018634990382,0.0,0.16116507916311462,0.17078153116389952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326453558213896,0.0,0.09057395733116423,0.0,0.0,0.08785329803947874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470172207455155,0.0,0.18885487132115752,0.05341136077020533,0.0,0.07993082890980882,0.0,0.0,0.27583832906039163,0.08530473598568489,0.0899549772130742,0.08607377207905853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379294370756737,0.0,0.0,0.16875040315346146,0.0,0.0,0.16885220091363942,0.15572080306545133,0.07986558056671841,0.21109067567540185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383814531657288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680062603965101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360402701480056,0.08469283754193126,0.05857784652252353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807465163682291,0.0,0.0,0.08361629259461854,0.0,0.053996805249257616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862913885714257,0.07606861246328281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24031713462696916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05104842822636877,0.0,0.07867959668912614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064575344686302,0.06349884803809283,0.1450849648953522,0.08312912152014193,0.0,0.08179579064598712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134561849028264,0.0,0.0,0.056401648449411285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24991305582777898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05991341055322018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293025042725812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784093587160436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629947918764897,0.09400088064946703,0.06325046299824343,0.0,0.0,0.07164663288852642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801182993262554,0.08092426573415483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05131470512206944
mentalhealth,pocketrocketanger,2020/01/20,"I had a serious anxiety attack last night and I've called in sick at work. I was diagnosed with GAD last year, I know I've always had an anxiety problem, but since starting this new job my anxiety has been the worst, but I also don't want to make out that my work only seems bad from my anxiety. 

I've been going through the NHS SilverCloud CBT course, and despite me getting better with social life, house work, general things, my current job is something I really can't get over. I've been having many sleepless nights because my anxiety is so bad, I've also been becoming very depressed at this job. To explain what my job is like, I work in a call center for a recycling company, and it's the most stressful job I've ever had. Firstly the role was made more attractive to me before I started, they said in the interview it's not a sales role and won't be like working in a call center, then I start and it is indeed a sales role and the only difference it has from other call centers is that you're not timed when going the loo, however I find I can never go in the first place. The benefits are gob shite, I'm only allowed 10 days of annual leave, no sick pay and long working hours. I'm 3 weeks in and still constantly needing to ask for help, the managers are always busy, the work load is far too high, the phone never stops ringing and emails never stop coming in, a quiet day is still really stressful. No one seems to like me there, I get eyes rolled at me, I get laughed at like when I was back in school, I feel genuinely very out of place (never done a call center job so I don't get into the flow of it), and last night was one of the worst experiences I've ever had. 

I was sweating like mad, my heart felt like it would actually pound out of my chest, I felt like I was going to actually be sick, I was having weird hallucination like dreams where I was having weird dreams but I was fully awake making me feel even worse, I was shaking, I felt like I was going to die at some points. This went on from midnight till five in the morning. I called in sick because not only am I sleep deprived, I actually feel dizzy and like I can't move my body. My anxiety was that strong that I took propranolol and it didn't make any difference, I kept trying to focus on my breathing, but absolutely nothing worked. There was no way I was going to deal with a stressful day at work today.

I hate my current situation so much, I have to do this job to pay rent, but I feel like I can't do it anymore, I really do. I feel sick or depressed constantly. It's only a matter if time till they fire me now, I've been ill a lot now (I had a bad cold the start of this month so I was off for 4 days), and I had a day off from stress before that), they've already told me they only allow their staff 5 sick days a year, I've already gone over that. 

I've tired to go to hr about my stress, but they keep being like ""you'll be ok, you'll get over this, it's stressful for everyone"". 

I just want to get out, but money...",4.465670546558705,4.47511627724359,5.639851551956817,83.87532388663969,69.72115384615385,8.812010796221323,27.478744939271262,8.611707548084741,1.7332442307692308,2343,69,507,35,38,784,257,624,0.23199999999999998,0.6609999999999999,0.10800000000000001,-0.9981,12,0,1,0,0,0,70.0,0,2,5,13,22,40,3,7,31,1,61,17,7,6,6,74,110,33,1,6,13,0,9,12,0,4,10,3,1,0,25,22,0,4,13,2,6,14,17,22,0,5,38,14,68,18,63,64,7,104,0,3,1,0,26,38,0,7,63,312,93,22,0.0,0.0,0.1350047211617009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177806653066918,0.07375627455117509,0.07674272432777852,0.0,0.0,0.03135977151755024,0.0,0.2116670262957782,0.0,0.045733674189586265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04311128641459784,0.052462453427408816,0.0,0.0354595773722101,0.11551226010542412,0.05622253432293183,0.05093037845870805,0.07848091233101608,0.0,0.0,0.040784957215729084,0.0,0.05122335305580519,0.0,0.0,0.2825313372059396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03972397674297997,0.0,0.09966783344034562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844210405504282,0.04754252518969395,0.07943753894559412,0.04680573961045156,0.0478600743734274,0.09636068963026097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719164098859562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030458513028494588,0.08342728910765952,0.0,0.044064844897920966,0.0,0.045109304630240835,0.0,0.0,0.1165856114469504,0.03294455488410633,0.13283285374200884,0.0,0.042148261340310585,0.07845076628523248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16865223633230403,0.0,0.18345746301915689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04552900100597162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05464647990009844,0.030909902745399218,0.04872301411158468,0.0,0.0,0.045413971600617976,0.05321050179687803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203340524273217,0.040989118003698186,0.0,0.0,0.02534359004181661,0.11276960430110347,0.0,0.048829111208772064,0.0,0.0,0.03257237806916572,0.2703534309243959,0.0,0.0,0.0408103110490829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03920531161876282,0.0,0.043635114331811095,0.09234633281038172,0.04675335730454462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03680854149553756,0.04901293159176194,0.033899820430266174,0.03419367745717503,0.14226687898903798,0.044538140395358375,0.0,0.12982737004396613,0.0,0.04424857235382965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062497415334449226,0.2104351471447956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636068963026097,0.0,0.043593567016051535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04412581319710734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862732173617033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043865911474131165,0.0,0.0,0.04667082732822868,0.0,0.08396270175607727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03814679257793921,0.051835175889302636,0.046148289231217283,0.04700842036113453,0.0,0.03550156884317311,0.0,0.0,0.13056169647143762,0.0,0.07365497404306799,0.07710838560788917,0.3169473607799455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030636747295484112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053780037830724985,0.0530023920900044,0.043711614208351166,0.044064844897920966,0.05123544572549663,0.0313090481146226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760993852452409,0.05439962653933588,0.03660392904589276,0.03699065978727576,0.0,0.0,0.04274905360200651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3021503283006286,0.0,0.04699510997886535,0.032758762624163384,0.0,0.0,0.059393077497355375
mentalhealth,darknessnbroknpieces,2020/01/20,"I feel like I’m going crazy! Do you ever get this feeling when you tell your friend your issues with her, it becomes your fault in the end? Or when you tell her that your reactions are based on what she does or she does it first that’s why you picked it up eventually? 

Somehow, this friend of mine, always, always finds a way to make it my fault. That I’m the one who always started things. I will tell her what triggers me, and her reaction is always “I’m like this because of you. I’m doing this because you did this first”. I did not! It’s the other way around! I’m having those reactions because of what she did. 

It seems that the only way to calm her is for me to admit that yes, I did that first, I said those things first, that it is my fault. Whenever I try to reason with her, she always finds a way to make it my fault. It’s exhausting and I don’t know if I’m angry at her or at me for allowing her to do this to me. I just can’t handle her accusations and the more I try to explain things, the more it gets worse. The more she gets worse. The more I feel worse. 

I apologize if this is the wrong thread to post this. I just don’t know what to do with this feeling, I feel like I want to punch something! My muscles are shaking. I don’t know what to do to make this feeling go away. I just don’t want to feel this because I’m the one who’s suffering. This is not a really good feeling.",0.518784838350058,2.4098352207357903,2.307033444816053,96.27401727982166,83.08026755852843,5.458238573021182,18.662318840579708,6.588339656340683,-0.16860677814938674,1077,26,256,11,30,355,107,299,0.141,0.758,0.102,-0.9515,0,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,10,0,4,8,15,0,1,13,1,23,1,0,7,1,44,56,10,0,4,10,0,8,3,2,1,1,1,0,0,42,7,0,0,17,0,0,3,7,8,0,6,5,9,49,7,29,50,4,24,0,1,0,0,35,7,0,7,12,183,91,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37347908256767065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991431649923225,0.0,0.0,0.0843418533237813,0.0,0.0,0.2188917917364822,0.0991438924703243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15711663274448198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950955908661679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120208832815211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3631232022909001,0.12826338644079224,0.0,0.0,0.16409627482045153,0.3054332040003825,0.0,0.0,0.13871213112692465,0.0,0.14070333173998195,0.0,0.10203669926834567,0.07529480196119763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369653844296197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148005703587398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13157123653755534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976648058101855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166092640790895,0.06827411665323843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597482823231847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05750894928893095,0.09229849287077144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539181019104382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172322026991669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910931806189166,0.0,0.0,0.06353965544454984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353887636441537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17891756186142976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189585051448268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589732272290936,0.2850209336857483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081003446107752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27444984337706513,0.0,0.09814938320753733,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oothisisathrowaway,2020/01/20,Idk if I made a mistake I’m in university.  And my English teacher asked us to write some challenges we may face for the class. So I wrote some English challenges but I also wrote that I have a mental health related challenge too. And I mean he said to include anything we wanted on the list. But idk if that was a mistake. Ahhhhhhhhh I’m wack,1.9972670807453448,4.290915724637685,4.3296480331262925,81.57782608695653,80.15942028985508,5.681987577639752,28.697722567287784,6.868970318607317,1.5463026915113876,271,13,53,3,7,94,47,69,0.12,0.821,0.059000000000000004,-0.5927,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,3,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,5,0,3,2,1,1,0,19,12,8,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,1,9,3,5,6,2,2,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,5,0,35,11,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648406403603515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725289228379945,0.0,0.30960405118831225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3520236881068368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3133659256017801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607468155318737,0.0,0.0,0.3337466485921944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31502339714131605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3983629177317656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953356784316074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bedriddendavid,2020/01/20,Confused I’m confused as to what my mental health issue is. I have mood swings which usually cause me to be depressed at night. I know I have sessional depression but it might be more than that. Sometimes I feel suicidal and hopeless but I don’t have serious thoughts to actually follow through with killing my self. I think I may have bipolar disorder because one day I can be energetic and happy and a few days later be depressed. But I don’t know and I know have good insurance or good support to figure out a doctor to see. Everything has become too much for me and I feel very abandoned by my family and friends. I have made it obvious to everybody that I need help and still nobody makes no effort to supper me. I just need adequate therapy but I don’t know who to see since I’m at college in another city. Any advice would help thank you,3.1458882235528947,5.272312011976052,4.579544910179642,82.05921756487028,75.58682634730539,8.28566866267465,29.097405189620762,9.029198982220553,2.6639783632734533,674,30,128,16,15,224,104,167,0.203,0.612,0.184,-0.429,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,1,0,1,3,16,1,2,2,0,19,4,0,3,1,36,38,13,2,3,6,0,2,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,7,9,1,1,9,0,0,1,4,9,0,1,2,4,22,6,18,29,3,11,0,5,2,0,6,4,0,5,6,88,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.13072912476830414,0.0,0.0,0.13090765510023106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109982483900758,0.14047248893655132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166295194398614,0.14795224365636944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13761749353883768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17279084675112935,0.0,0.34614789266889984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15353386306424865,0.13711739558379848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12039782323147848,0.0,0.12628893610189126,0.0,0.1354720173981097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349992577065648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22472458178209265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14260671668058386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239701585626974,0.0,0.0,0.17958592104669768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982316752008547,0.0,0.0,0.14821084743510815,0.0,0.29449150958373665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675957381364844,0.0894217265883921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13500377507872774,0.14211418303714093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984786417063892,0.19866458690280075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257157402405957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077718545673566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21350324998060066,0.0,0.1397532251446152,0.0,0.0,0.11081605362065117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249340116168845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698348408071104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653440793386116,0.15202027742367696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333566132977447,0.15319902310811026,0.0,0.0,0.08583844967833694,0.0,0.1063521147111471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14754195168345866,0.11053397921470516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516388011098112,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slow-tempo,2020/01/20,"What is the best way to self diagnose? Hi, I've been struggling with what I believe might be depression or/and anxiety for some years now. There are periods when I feel fine, but it always came back and sometimes even worse than before. I want to seek out help but I won't be able to do that for at least 6 more months. But during that time, I would like to somehow prepare my parents and explain to them what I am going through so when the times come, they can help me overcome my fears and maybe help me find a good specialist or at least support me emotionally. Any tips on how to better self diagnose myself so I know at least a bit what I am talking about and have better idea of what I am going through? I did read some articles and looked at symptoms... Also what is a good way of telling my parents without them being like ""you're just overreacting""?",4.934832535885168,5.5058588362573095,5.239978734715578,85.18267942583735,68.82456140350878,8.323444976076557,30.165337586390216,8.296473431620573,1.98074970760234,675,25,139,9,11,214,109,171,0.071,0.7090000000000001,0.221,0.9828,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,3,3,13,12,0,2,5,0,17,3,0,1,0,27,27,15,0,2,6,2,1,2,0,3,3,0,0,2,9,9,0,0,5,1,0,4,2,3,0,0,3,2,20,9,22,18,8,21,0,1,1,0,14,6,0,5,11,101,29,1,0.12935276458962042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034433591084528,0.1076318623724863,0.0,0.0,0.08796431561624464,0.0,0.09895451085697342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946429149976793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006967538447826,0.1457362699991997,0.13574774600542236,0.22880401707720635,0.14121971685956095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479451027208461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11142595301742872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141134659857736,0.2625806664083217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455044497571911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543628105646657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555782237253226,0.06540464439221487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822608341199638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14702831410382206,0.2169899236748513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601072943955037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14602352634906146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108889655141283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12639045383594424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862374392904398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299522382235334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722284178170116,0.0,0.0,0.1032481425980758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2872618744183015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12938776928477638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26988628851337204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12793319172076076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13522759504532147,0.0,0.0,0.1467879843566894,0.0,0.1344470506975891,0.0,0.1039688523814996,0.11306001770521625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15085327451917047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629561196952546,0.2053484073112956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12469144910022527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182151803266615,0.09188849265234222,0.0,0.0,0.08329893939873911
mentalhealth,modnarsua,2020/01/20,"Seeking advice to motivate unemployed husband with bipolar My (33F) husband (38M) and I have been together for 12 years, living together for 8 years, married for a little over 6. He was diagnosed with bipolar in his early 20s and we open from the beginning about his mental health.

Everything was going well until about 2 years ago. Husband convinced himself that his medication wasn't doing anything and, without telling me or seeking medical advice, stopped taking his medication. I could tell within a short while that something was different (short tempered, very defensive, not sleeping) and, when I found out the reason why, encouraged him to resume taking medication and speak to a new psychiatrist about changing meds.

Husband started seeing the psychiatrist who believed that maybe there was a misdiagnosis all those years ago and kept husband off the lithium. To say things went to shit over the next 12 months is an understatement. Towards the end of it, we were constantly fighting: I couldn't say anything without it becoming an argument. Husband became emotionally abusive towards me, was yelling at his boss, swearing at his parents- everything was totally out of character. Because of his illness, he couldn't see how bad it was or how it was affecting those around him. I had a few suicidal thoughts and became depressed myself. Had I not been scared that he would harm himself or our dogs, I would have walked out.

It all came to a head when, 7 months ago, he had an appointment with a different psychiatrist for a second opinion. He showed up late, didn't like the questions being asked, and started yelling at the staff. The psychiatrist had him scheduled and the police came to the house later that night to have him involuntarily admitted to the local hospital. He was to stay there until he was deemed to be not a threat to himself or others.

Husband was resistant to the treatment at first but was swayed after 48 hours to have a blood test so they could prescribe meds. He was put back on lithium and, within days, we could see an improvement. He was in the public hospital for 2 weeks and then in a private hospital for 3. It sounds horrible, but I was relieved to not have him at home: I knew where he was, that he wasn't doing anything stupid, and felt like I could breathe again.

Just before being admitted to hospital, Husband resigned from his job. He has not worked since. He is applying for jobs, going for some interviews, but has not received a 'yes' yet. We have savings put aside, but had other plans for that money. I wouldn't mind so much about the not working, but he's not doing anything at home. He has no motivation to do anything and sleeps most of the day.

Though we're not arguing, we barely talk. We haven't had sex in 7 months and I feel like we're room mates who share a bed, not husband and wife. I've tried talking to him about everything, but my attempts seem to fall on deaf ears, or things improve temporarily but revert to the way they've been.

I am at a loss about what to do. How can I encourage him to do more without coming off like a nag? His parents have tried talking to him wothout success. He is also seeing a psychologist but she hasn't been able to get through to him either.

I love my husband but every day I get more and more frustrated with his inaction. Reddit, what advice can you offer?",6.022580910075033,7.384731606741575,6.141042965396244,76.83973571241928,66.80096308186198,9.069827167867407,33.91052297584829,9.350609893011278,3.2098474672440185,2673,121,465,51,43,849,286,623,0.084,0.828,0.08800000000000001,0.6214,9,0,1,0,4,0,76.0,7,1,1,9,24,28,9,1,37,1,66,19,7,9,3,101,94,43,1,9,29,13,2,4,1,3,10,8,4,0,23,34,0,3,12,1,1,11,22,15,1,2,38,14,54,13,83,44,11,85,0,3,4,2,86,33,1,10,43,336,77,12,0.0678515568589937,0.08039299970922267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989112682346004,0.18043893368046726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05426086550604497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791802498381502,0.060402270969928125,0.06343204637625796,0.0,0.0,0.05217365899791189,0.056653215815836364,0.041361679285860806,0.07493671372467384,0.05773667738370231,0.0764454694234021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520821037138702,0.0,0.0,0.07177795036144151,0.0584481082465886,0.0,0.07332342825739051,0.0,0.2166957880819016,0.0,0.0,0.1312759228644107,0.0,0.05844044649879105,0.06886790194782719,0.0,0.14178087089985836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763238688964894,0.0600963399680141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057167863067353414,0.0,0.1829418126336628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0343077858590796,0.04847316577744721,0.06514813512965004,0.0,0.0,0.05771449960227616,0.0,0.07439572991788235,0.0,0.0,0.07089927597818038,0.0,0.07712320680541508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06963527251195528,0.07212303205926912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612128761472098,0.0,0.06682011585080032,0.0782915866908726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466440103114946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653951154273625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325953734671355,0.06800508521628035,0.059914167804639214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123867916688942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816600873395717,0.0,0.15073556726356754,0.2734132207584569,0.06837841045737561,0.0,0.06851073012297676,0.0,0.16247539602971056,0.0,0.04987870139155347,0.0,0.0,0.0655314564242287,0.0721609004786695,0.06367408972164926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068224840305044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641911073808868,0.07600927224034963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976270111188247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791656275270213,0.06793124521565011,0.0,0.2162756241837495,0.061769509038171584,0.0,0.0,0.06964864806268495,0.05612750899240142,0.0,0.1358011168837838,0.0,0.0,0.05223544339719696,0.0,0.0,0.09605136234968464,0.07232073167478012,0.0,0.056726939725716775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421859045043011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203185305504732,0.163609533695897,0.118610502746377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015511885104914,0.0,0.06666381011279048,0.0538665570535929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213350642818016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0559846403985562,0.0,0.05385740760466207,0.05442642616946703,0.0,0.0610066982606296,0.06289907298394659,0.06122547643068953,0.0,0.0,0.19621943857085086,0.0,0.09879348300297876,0.0,0.0,0.09639959847271663,0.0,0.0,0.17477671206606574
mentalhealth,glimmeringsunshin_e,2020/01/20,"I’m struggling with myself. I’ve been suffering with my depression especially heavily recently. I’m reacting the worst way, by pushing those I care about away. My friends recently reached out to me and said that I was being toxic - acting out, being cold, and ultimately making her feel as if she did something wrong. 

My boyfriend said that sometimes when I look at him, he feels like I hate him. Which kind of broke my heart. Because I spent a long time dealing with bad and toxic people, the idea of becoming one is terrifying. I’m trying to handle my mood swings. I don’t know what to do, but my past trauma and stuff with relationships is making it a lot worse. 
I’m not looking for an answer or anything. There’s not much to do. I’m seeing a therapist. I guess I needed to just write. 

I want to be a good person. I believe in the good in people. I absolutely hate who I’ve been.",2.6903500000000022,4.77828321714286,4.319053571428572,83.57800892857145,76.82857142857142,7.3464285714285715,25.223214285714285,8.278499904357787,1.7027785714285717,693,25,136,13,16,232,114,175,0.18100000000000002,0.7290000000000001,0.09,-0.9481,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,0,5,17,2,1,8,0,12,1,1,3,0,29,34,9,0,3,6,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,8,10,0,0,5,0,1,2,3,10,0,1,7,8,23,6,22,24,3,15,0,3,3,0,13,6,0,4,7,89,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387869003920685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300168360892681,0.0,0.11554531538953985,0.08435793466096342,0.1528348584786382,0.0,0.15591199453428628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14109226725649174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426683902412982,0.1191904064927026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994276866084115,0.09886194714685506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691555678227696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23214078275898234,0.0,0.0,0.15244617877456346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732521782088467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16398635303011952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562193079467253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410620922922796,0.07605252728530229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760769898860426,0.0,0.0,0.122465968296557,0.2324163308125262,0.0,0.0,0.11764959213335725,0.0,0.0,0.18474551774685474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017285638690384,0.10261038722240264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377294963226472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210370747283712,0.19187683959183185,0.12083204762343767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732760882188587,0.14857321318379746,0.0,0.0,0.2632707855340517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11027456626917344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653518418904033,0.13686585424774894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466957374239522,0.15841719669130824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067512362402248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080693141496078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395402277598948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162279051363126,0.10984321115985377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410256746595973,0.0,0.1513017768268437,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sexualsiren,2020/01/20,Depersonalization I’ve been struggling with this ever since I had a bad trip with accidentally eating two weed cookies ( it contained a lot of fucking weed) basically I feel like my body is moving through realms and it the worse experience ever please help I’ve been feeling like this for over a month and it’s starting to stress me out and I cry about it at night please help !!!!!,3.664940476190477,6.230357041666673,4.3186507936507965,82.42000000000003,75.80555555555556,6.336507936507938,25.563492063492063,7.447530270364453,1.2671325396825392,305,11,58,4,7,97,52,72,0.218,0.59,0.191,-0.6562,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,2,4,0,4,3,1,0,2,12,8,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,6,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,1,3,2,5,2,10,5,1,10,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,1,7,36,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554287618099285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067723980281492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20447872761434147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19047949999821714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33676945378770823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18209192751625444,0.0,0.0,0.1882476254781759,0.2659733972485281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17209410074607007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24954690906392102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818884808473751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15825938395756234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485843846391539,0.197849629027159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469061168534367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4086769851752325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398647897629136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175901937057474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213235962139392,0.1946060092747494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818430074172316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897043244189834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,staylor1113,2020/01/20,"Need Advice on how to continue going to school/work when depressed I'm 21 years old, and I've dealt with depression, anxiety, binge eating disorder on and off for the last 4 years. Recently things went south in my life. I found out my oldest brother is a heroin addict, I was recently sexually assaulted by a tinder date, I'm in senior year of college and am realizing I don't enjoy my major, a lot of my friendships are fizzling out. 

Last week, I was late to work two times, I skipped my therapy appointment, and missed two of my classes. I have no motivation to do any homework, and when I do I have a hard time focusing. At work, I'm good at distracting myself and pretending to be ok. But the minute I'm alone, I isolate, and recently I've been self harming. 

I have 3 more terms of school left, but at this rate, I feel so hopeless and defeated. For anyone that's been in similar circumstance, any advice on how to continue going to school/work when your depressed?",5.4010350877193005,5.942769436842109,6.608157894736844,75.88627192982459,67.78947368421052,10.543859649122806,32.675438596491226,10.504223727775694,3.4980701754385963,763,32,145,20,12,258,112,190,0.20800000000000002,0.748,0.044000000000000004,-0.98,0,1,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,1,0,4,6,12,1,1,6,1,14,3,0,3,0,21,25,16,0,1,2,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,3,11,1,0,4,1,0,3,2,9,0,2,6,2,19,3,27,18,4,39,0,6,0,0,3,14,0,1,22,90,22,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029489275344416,0.0,0.2335879298817141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378710306993752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16255595962235664,0.0,0.0914327892999922,0.0,0.0,0.08357145221165922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088282714236144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698074880518246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229922146726033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604331123277224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104796448530992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585241085187458,0.10024805236145497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706681442807736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19485017860265447,0.13482423253924547,0.0,0.12985927914202602,0.0,0.08442080279909289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161198159423593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862287228332842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254165686273505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3540359682857713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3628831185104647,0.0,0.0,0.12468585786991986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13668200931536362,0.0,0.07940405199600926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393866287132801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23350815428012806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587206646929128,0.0,0.0,0.1107966208767292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3480491384719236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309016832784741
mentalhealth,Goldberg_the_Goalie,2020/01/20,"What do you do when you have a sequence of bad things happen. My family seem to be lurching from one crisis to the next. I feel like my resilience reservoir is running out. We make it through me being made redundant and then our house requires immense amount of money for repairs. We are busy making our way through that now we are concerned she is going to be made redundant. 

It’s like all the bad things are ganging up on us. 

Please send tips for finding inner strength and resilience.",4.083467741935486,6.248269107526884,3.9157930107526897,87.69368951612906,72.9784946236559,5.940322580645162,29.90456989247312,6.6274283507984215,1.5673021505376339,389,17,71,3,8,118,69,93,0.106,0.7929999999999999,0.1,-0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,6,2,0,2,2,5,0,0,3,0,11,0,0,4,1,15,19,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,3,0,1,3,0,2,0,1,2,1,13,3,13,14,2,12,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,1,6,53,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3601450116091372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20331116735697205,0.0,0.10904745439929807,0.15407217931281558,0.0,0.0,0.19711525931347854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256823293385742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19071315961484545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488501666819796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21072750076479674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4081376836515955,0.2879181055907196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293637524928607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14614119109926432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367370360807306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963346672319399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865584579592228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594202260241059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17118601660734964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Stasz18,2020/01/20,"I've been losing sleep and I'm worried that I could die at any point. Lately, I've been losing sleep before my last semester of college not sleeping until 4 or so. I've had no urge to sleep and I'm worried something could happen to me in my sleep so easily, especially after a young and close family member of mine almost died because of a virus hitting his heart. I don't know how to respond to it still even with it being almost a year ago but it's made me more cautious about life and I worry something will happen to me. Now, I have pain on the inside of my mouth that is constant pain and I can't stop thinking it is the start of something terrible. 

Anyone else feel the same way at all? I don't expect an answer to it but writing it down helped a bit.",2.909339622641511,4.080350327044027,4.4944811320754745,86.43908018867926,74.0314465408805,6.557861635220128,23.94182389937107,6.816661863887847,0.8059974842767295,598,17,123,5,12,201,99,159,0.19899999999999998,0.774,0.027000000000000003,-0.9768,0,0,3,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,7,5,0,0,8,0,13,10,7,2,1,26,23,12,2,3,4,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,8,7,0,1,4,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,4,1,14,0,20,14,4,20,0,2,0,0,4,7,0,3,12,82,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826377969589133,0.0,0.22200491527785995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538329178719434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751043003020898,0.1135811705249421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757446729975733,0.0,0.09432705067164278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102188310737327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11979183849962535,0.0,0.1770129102415486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23009414781161885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260278210406876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.073216827289258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450158094691372,0.0,0.05605019896892716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960524544344367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313603811541409,0.07430188757804605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06092146564231528,0.09035933165732243,0.1250461008639966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829818143976519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480304957251475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048910242857362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359090957206809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047911519564648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5546612402213779,0.0,0.0,0.2560182992574125,0.0,0.0,0.07846175199195403,0.0,0.08852670365853095,0.09267739607519118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102960856508451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798931019889793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377273453554803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713851771626737
mentalhealth,Spirited-Mouse,2020/01/20,"I recently found out my mom has cancer I just found out yesterday that my mom has cancer. I can't stop crying and i'm very upset. I feel saddened and I don't want her to go. I'm scared to let her go and I feel as though a part of me will be gone when her time comes. I'm trying to stay strong, but I can't. My heart is weak and I don't feel at ease. I am diagnosed with bipolar disorder so this is more difficult for me. At times I just can't help but cry. I want to be happy, but I don't know if I can. I want this to be a dream, but its not. I feel empty on the inside. I feel torn apart, I feel like a wreck. I don't know how I can get through this. I am in complete shock. My father passed away when I was 7 from a heart attack, almost 20 years ago. I don't know if I can manage to lose my mother. She means the whole world to me and I feel like the world will end for me when her time has come. I'm mentally weak. I'm trying to hold it together, but I can't. Its too difficult.",-1.19533923303835,0.4398786327433655,1.6055088495575234,100.32398598820059,87.89380530973452,5.18259587020649,14.726401179941005,6.42735559955562,-0.8351793510324486,745,12,201,8,24,259,108,226,0.243,0.652,0.105,-0.9840000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,2,9,13,1,2,7,0,26,8,2,1,0,40,53,19,0,5,10,4,7,2,0,2,6,0,0,0,7,10,0,2,13,1,0,6,10,9,0,0,4,7,39,4,22,43,3,29,0,1,0,0,10,10,0,3,14,126,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029659473735645,0.0,0.11631420292358532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13214506820236085,0.10913308708727057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001175039681843,0.12178813884699922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25518546370301937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789665272981033,0.0,0.0,0.13312569496473795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288040034832392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4111263884435721,0.16596480597616128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25471975438874433,0.0,0.0,0.060687105911306466,0.0,0.13202911186456204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365101669328675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752926080138192,0.07785741877418834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19151013052806487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877814327006052,0.0,0.11349663818042008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12994968771256465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265287495764517,0.0,0.0,0.1170586802254688,0.0,0.0,0.272082755511335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578643718733834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469077402399212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629316706584775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238076367403604,0.0,0.09711224132157142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412341378524665,0.0,0.20319579916997726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577256124394771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584148087264527,0.20553677600601364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968485939456306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480113646892185
mentalhealth,Chris96s,2020/01/20,"Advice I struggle with severe social anxiety, I'm trying to type a word document to show my doctor for when I make an appointment to see him, but Im finding it difficult to write everything down without it looking messy / not making sense. 

I'm not very good at explaining stuff / putting my thoughts into words, I'm not sure why but this i the biggest problem I have and i feel like there's no hope for me to change my life around.

Is this a common problem? and What should I do?",3.1156249999999983,4.885502645833334,4.208749999999998,86.26125,74.625,7.300000000000002,27.625,8.07648339933343,1.81265,378,15,75,6,8,123,70,96,0.23,0.6759999999999999,0.09300000000000001,-0.9085,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,4,0,4,2,0,2,1,25,15,5,0,4,6,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,4,1,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,3,11,4,13,13,0,8,0,0,2,0,4,5,0,1,3,48,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866118464693365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14609009675931062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17000212330875047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20201896008628945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19546397308367894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17162984156207173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965592244862643,0.13642767024050667,0.0,0.0,0.17454141115504013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017500703567228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18967444246531895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20627835071267786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348864378287015,0.09329738215286763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16036513266069385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549454193547245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.365461419231584,0.0,0.19197571641729144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15217687489543122,0.0,0.0,0.2157396300007266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19466795936739065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996413531188478,0.21861282014325376,0.0,0.0,0.17998520252488215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15160736388540522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12965482480343302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756870706351073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17231903414672986,0.0,0.0,0.1840864626215961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alwaystiredladyugh,2020/01/20,"I can’t do it anymore, I wish I was straight and I wish life was easier. 25 f I have two degrees I am a painter and a photographer. I resigned from my job 6 months ago because the extend terrible conditions. I resigned around August. It’s been hard finding a job since then because of the timing and all with the holidays and the end of the year. I’ve been getting interviews but haven’t heard back about getting the jobs I interviewed for. Then on top of that my gf broke up with me 7 months ago and it was extremely traumatizing. And because of what they did to me now caused me to fear of someone hurting me again. I tried putting myself out there again but all I get is rejected by women. And I can’t take it anymore. I feel like I’m not enough, or worthy of someone. And I know that sounds cliche but I genuinely feel I just am not o e of these people who are lucky to find someone who wants me that I care about. i see on Instagram all these women with ladies who they talk about how much they love them
Non stop on Instagram or it not that I see how amazing their life is. For the past couple of days I just have been crying non stop and I feel like I’ve reached  my end  point because no matter how hard I try nothing works out.",2.5117224702380945,4.051237367187504,3.5916294642857127,91.02494791666668,75.71875,6.9074404761904775,25.471726190476193,7.62386473244151,1.1349273065476186,970,34,214,13,21,313,134,256,0.162,0.69,0.14800000000000002,-0.6955,3,1,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,5,2,14,13,0,1,10,0,18,3,0,4,3,45,35,19,0,3,10,0,5,2,1,0,2,2,0,2,15,15,0,2,6,1,0,1,7,7,0,1,8,9,36,6,28,27,5,30,0,5,2,1,16,10,0,3,21,143,51,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19464022169386627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177596586559735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773426809221224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441991160220197,0.0,0.2677020838558204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193580696441448,0.11278213963117327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147792572212172,0.12059655763668492,0.07080393961605909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19447850908515624,0.11343997110719438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235416078716738,0.16653577524283025,0.15686461132330204,0.0,0.0,0.20068781188148466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17207851794459114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19669630612290195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11752992987505155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32684185035215085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603364109096615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155092501436719,0.10727338202793607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990876235479539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17526287956801945,0.0,0.08070654125439229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10534419311949952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480471670415098,0.07611291991802975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378479797686213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036689289725073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17497305561829496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090817463037813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790681109092236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835747512858974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254663541865721,0.08824313927223883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401805063800606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490771898627843,0.0,0.1072465629098634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475558937770415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525007153767331,0.0,0.0,0.07992670307366118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069963496010165
mentalhealth,Justdewith,2020/01/20,"I hate being born Ever since I was little ive had death anxiety. I would be scared my family would die and I would also imagen myself being dead almost every night. My parents be with me until I was asleep. Most times I would wake up, asking them to come back and never leave me. When I grew older I got depressed and also suicidal. It was finally nice coming to terms with it and actually wish for it to just end. Then I get better and I feel just like when I was younger. Now I'm constantly thrown between the two states of mind. Either being scared that Im going to die or wanting it to end. I hate it. It pops up everytime I'm not distracted. It specially sucks when I want to sleep. Even when I've been sleeping with people. I truly don't know what to do.",1.0376470588235271,3.278989535031851,3.2690895466466863,88.07391532409143,83.5859872611465,6.241888347695768,18.152491569876357,7.510576382923642,0.5171666541775939,595,14,122,10,17,203,98,157,0.23199999999999998,0.664,0.10400000000000001,-0.9791,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,12,11,3,3,1,0,18,4,4,0,2,29,34,14,5,7,5,1,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,9,10,0,0,2,0,0,4,3,7,0,1,7,1,21,4,16,18,3,27,0,1,0,0,3,3,1,3,20,88,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.12635835073269558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12966018395414178,0.0,0.0,0.20709767321348144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905541123704092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105067887489905,0.0,0.0,0.09956571168494753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451866018027228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22307914016317504,0.0,0.13992691825427578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115249487690926,0.0,0.2687692702180569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293699530951185,0.0,0.0,0.08552339738047741,0.11712628899604205,0.10909641150597613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206661453523908,0.0,0.06547133517184889,0.0925038676786524,0.0,0.14184411694686214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765039108142247,0.0,0.07358911681193248,0.0,0.10356071203715288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556785908574813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13986565354123234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07116138335993216,0.0,0.0,0.13710555987209785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063259664833528,0.12977764714614795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074259566542107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986655302638348,0.0,0.0,0.1215125828012358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14377739254532834,0.0,0.0,0.08976836028646568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592734688518428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711104962286426,0.0,0.2591563465135888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416352029047162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755035471073607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12648769892346728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274681575954574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489009698677951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3679287522641779,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MVV1043,2020/01/20,"When your boyfriend thinks you aren't happy to see him This has been brought up to me from my boyfriend. Whenever he visits or I visit him, he mentions I dont look happy to see him. When in fact it's quite the opposite but I just cant Express it. Something isnclouding my mind, or something from home has gotten me upset. No one in my life understands what info through or how I feel, other than him. I am so eager to see him,  because with him I feel happy. The world brings me down and I carry it around with me. On the phone today he said i was so quiet and not happy to talk with him. But in reality i want him to talk to me and help cheer me up. I am dying to talk to him, but i can express it, again. It just takes so much energy to try and fake a giddy mood, I just couldnt do it. It's a eternal pit of hopelessness what makes me sad, because I know it cant be changed, at least not for another 3-4 years. After awhile it gets to me and takes over what makes me happy.",1.9539285714285728,2.9443949047619067,3.744940476190475,91.59026785714286,76.14285714285714,6.773809523809526,22.648809523809533,7.1686216300943375,0.5513095238095231,750,20,176,8,16,253,112,210,0.168,0.757,0.075,-0.9689,0,0,2,0,0,1,23.0,0,2,0,1,11,12,0,1,5,0,14,1,0,3,1,33,33,17,1,2,11,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,14,9,0,0,6,0,0,4,8,4,0,1,5,8,36,7,31,26,2,22,0,2,4,0,25,11,0,3,7,127,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299109751247268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028964640509513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15104614147470233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13106071407459322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857975279584508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14519984273935366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12528646723310818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472816296844004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6594236979626026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304181942838103,0.0,0.12427321388882948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808749433003979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750818662395256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403760513468667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539699390792229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509503498601646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107446212342804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395204478144717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177379450105506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117849128471889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961763076235462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19075536365042955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863018859191609,0.29873773502335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938463100731699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11743459705816266,0.0,0.0,0.08411415401156429,0.0,0.0,0.12897535631184626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730743800985154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978202418584679
mentalhealth,paradoxicaldoggo,2020/01/20,"Weird symptoms and I'm not sure where to place them! Heyo! I would love some help placing these symptoms, I've been trying to find information online but I can drive myself crazy with that stuff, and thought it would be best to reach out to you wonderful people and see if anyone has any opinions on what this could be and if I should worry. 

So I have anxiety, ADHD, and depression. Zoning out is something that I have delt with in the past. However more recently I've had these episodes which I have called dissociative episodes. I feel like my consciousness is being sucked into the back of my head, and often times I find the edges of my vision starting to turn black and I end up closing my eyes and my eyelids flutter, and then the feeling subsides and I start to sort of ""come forward"" again and I am left with a tingling sensation in the back of my head. I have three distinct memories of this happening, once at a grocery store last year where I still walked around and kind of was on autopilot and then came back to and I was a few aisles over and had filled my cart with stuff I needed to get. The second was when I was seeing a musical, and I remembered part of what was happening and started to lose the plot a little bit, and found myself still watching the show and listening to the music but feeling like my consciousness was being pushed back until I did the weird fluttery thing and came right back. I have flashes of the scenes and songs, but I really lost the plot (granted it seemed like most of the people around me did too.) I was probably in that pushed back mental state for like 15 minutes or so. And the final example was like, 20 minutes ago? I kind of felt like I was being pushed back for like a few minutes (I didn't check how long but I know it wasn't long at all) and am just left with a fun tingly feeling in the back of my head. 

More context time: I have done a lot of research on DID and I don't think it's that because I don't feel like I have really lost long periods of time or have any other distinct personalities (it's more like personality states, but I feel like everyone feels more macho in some situations and more delicate other times) but yeah, no amnesia and no trauma as a child. As far as if it's DP/DR or BPD that's for sure possible cuz I have a terrible sense of self and sometimes feel like I don't belong in my body. And it also could just be a bad brain dissociation thing. But I'm not a professional, and with my ADHD shit honestly I haven't had the time to really get into this with a professional. So I would love to hear what other non-professionals but people who know about mental health think. 

Anyway, thank you so much for taking the time to read my garbage, I would love to hear your theories and queries. All the best!",5.160355212355213,5.630254646846852,5.647258687258687,82.81783783783786,68.29729729729729,9.009523809523813,28.28957528957529,9.002800196639251,2.021557528957529,2199,69,451,37,35,708,245,555,0.099,0.7440000000000001,0.158,0.9884,1,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,3,1,5,31,34,2,0,31,1,51,14,7,2,6,111,95,58,0,11,18,0,9,11,0,5,4,4,0,4,29,47,0,0,23,3,2,10,10,11,0,2,26,18,54,23,63,56,18,76,0,4,5,3,18,30,2,15,47,323,83,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318682087179485,0.0,0.052806572815761885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047639336260964636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102137530577297,0.0,0.04557206241062045,0.0,0.0,0.04165380346693899,0.0,0.0,0.10606259486744593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3664546758384497,0.04973974471923882,0.036314255761323605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250333046868718,0.0,0.06503668902609235,0.06617054767175021,0.07502826489136558,0.06650153628613018,0.06082919932041364,0.13626793556253375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05131560391837637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951260491193084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05130887714436956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06096236469217412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05276269961949877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05692315606105579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24096927045555944,0.21278958809162654,0.05719801715787968,0.06525770646303207,0.10889461036500153,0.0,0.0,0.06531711503096213,0.0,0.0,0.06224733825167578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535782607631368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341274868448446,0.06332175766803935,0.13428290245127786,0.0,0.0399295452391671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406917641540158,0.06547791712144717,0.04855875319993912,0.0,0.0,0.1294492975433944,0.0,0.0,0.3201400805521555,0.05970632963296563,0.0,0.15815680573450386,0.0,0.0666453115968791,0.13005873849337185,0.050645590081322495,0.16129691270868673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006819494636604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379193375726268,0.044171539527829234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06344174222715683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451016888593014,0.05686777230224919,0.12389820807520233,0.10403113587825803,0.12447915309088273,0.0,0.0,0.06715795667867241,0.0,0.0,0.06422819200169379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059587657459490725,0.0,0.11448915520180244,0.0,0.058819705585003525,0.0,0.06748293814054956,0.050873766725195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494160376405922,0.05423168952983845,0.062146104696930875,0.0,0.06114932620841047,0.0,0.06696090303811021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045861079242505313,0.05891777289380155,0.0,0.1264951205613541,0.0,0.09514781209009518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639031398197993,0.0,0.0,0.11229093640708182,0.12383527203060506,0.04479038172066403,0.0,0.0,0.05484546717210916,0.0,0.0,0.07915336370950225,0.07634207046330485,0.0,0.04729314581999551,0.20841985216330225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040445162942939435,0.06479672537521865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460279024300622,0.0,0.060497787043479086,0.0,0.16927164151305701,0.0,0.0,0.038362116412304144
mentalhealth,pickl3ju1ce,2020/01/20,"Am I paranoid / Is this normal? As long as i remember i've created situations in my head that usually stem from things that have happened in my life (They're usually negative) and convince myself they're going to happen and prepare what im going to do when they happen. I never realized this wasn't normal until i read something about someone else who experienced the same thing and when they expressed it their friends thought they were crazy. ex. if someone gets mad at me I tend to either create situations in my head where I usually go off and basically breakdown screaming at someone and get my shit rocked, and for someone reason im convinced it will happen.. (typing it out i cant believe i sometimes thing that stuff will happen)... Is there a name for this?? I've never been formally diagnosed with any mental illness but it runs in my family and i'm pretty sure i deal with anxiety and depression in some mild/moderate form.",6.614261363636363,7.372765994318183,7.277272727272727,71.3859090909091,65.19318181818181,10.263636363636364,35.31818181818181,10.230975488527342,3.85235909090909,749,34,125,17,11,248,111,176,0.10800000000000001,0.8029999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.4922,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,4,0,5,8,2,0,2,0,11,6,3,1,3,26,24,15,0,3,3,1,0,0,1,2,3,1,0,0,16,11,0,0,4,2,0,4,5,4,0,0,4,2,20,4,21,18,4,23,0,1,0,0,10,10,1,2,9,91,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186581758179736,0.0,0.08084467862136069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906482897571576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895112678829412,0.091021767805548,0.10726266748287157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828182596542487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962541267819908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164787142355381,0.0,0.1104265593829934,0.0,0.18018062085837167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4672610333408888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21691571455705325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22830441405465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464469501042023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352320592222572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650027801708274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16301339388962055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20708732943751731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751424395287973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570829500114054,0.0,0.0,0.10865632900708536,0.0,0.0,0.1197144951931443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847868987556733,0.0,0.2375768135106621,0.0,0.0,0.35816825585562073,0.08135739346580563,0.10451992213491866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209779689317941,0.0,0.0,0.0996018633535285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21062668373122886,0.0,0.0,0.08389787454341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34917376638486103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,grxce_thompson,2020/01/20,"Hospitalization for someone with medical triggers Hi there everyone, I’ve been suffering with sever mental health (depression, anxiety, s*icidal tendencies) for ten years now (I’m 18) and I’ve never gotten help until I started talk therapy a year ago. I haven’t talked about being s*icidal because one major trigger for me is a medical setting (n*edles, d*ctors etc.) but I feel like I’m in such a low point that I need to talk about it, even if it leads to me being hospitalized. Does anyone know of any non-medical alternatives that won’t blow that bank and actually work. 
Thanks",5.945660377358492,7.870820311320754,7.166179245283022,67.2843632075472,67.58490566037736,10.960377358490566,34.94811320754717,10.9516,4.610022641509435,467,23,74,15,8,158,79,106,0.076,0.853,0.07,0.3444,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,6,5,0,0,3,0,6,3,0,3,1,13,14,5,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,1,1,3,3,0,2,2,1,6,2,12,9,2,12,0,3,0,0,5,3,0,1,8,44,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.17225894013703527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15647513189643064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004026877139914,0.0,0.13503800940412006,0.0,0.0,0.12342752130908648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760550546991304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203719708593905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544746337912395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19686747061602228,0.11659039314975445,0.0,0.0,0.16867328966208162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925427358510994,0.12610657002488154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18763346785616086,0.0,0.0,0.11831824192912302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701127313855744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623919791973016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19607493201122214,0.35565248231988444,0.17789155439369053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088801460000138,0.1361438043446427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196151338358205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668693121179863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19941837832359968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495655902382092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494240532739635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4256424515883234,0.0,0.16251673327899754,0.20186703917282398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850932142040505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273473511104211
mentalhealth,stillwoozie,2020/01/20,"Why is getting help so darn hard? This is my first time posting here so I'll try to make it short and simple. Since I was about 8, my mental health has been quite the rollercoaster. My first experience with psychosis was when I was 12. my friend from school had a sister who called the police to my house because they believed I was suicidal/violent, and they took me to the hospital. I was interrogated by a doctor and they told my parents everything. This only ended up making me get In trouble. The doctor asked my parents to take me back there and consider counselling, but like they would let that happen. They were mad and refused to believe that anything was wrong. I experienced trauma early on as a kid and a lot of my issues stem from that I'm sure. As a teenager nearing adulthood (grad) I've tried many times to find counselling, talking to my family, talking to friends, (mind you I don't talk much) and everything has absolutely done nothing. My school counselor told my parents everything like the doctor did, and that basically broke my trust. When I was suicidal I tried to seek out a councilor at a local youth space and they told me to wait 5 months for a 30 minute session. Is that reasonable? Sometimes I feel really stuck and hopeless. I have never gotten I diagnosis so it's really hard to explain anything I feel to people without them assuming I'm just an angsty teen. P.S, I don't have a family doctor either. I really really need to talk to someone who can help me.    What other options do I have?? Should I just stick it out until I can go to a professional clinic or seek therapy on my own? Thanks xxxx",4.016099778815433,5.993503862619808,5.089664536741218,80.0140446055542,72.67412140575081,8.010272794298354,28.012902433030227,8.730908602173464,2.300131088719587,1291,50,235,25,26,424,178,313,0.12300000000000001,0.7859999999999999,0.09,-0.8957,3,0,0,0,0,1,35.0,0,1,7,3,11,13,1,0,16,0,28,6,0,3,2,37,50,20,1,3,6,4,4,2,2,2,6,0,0,1,14,13,0,2,6,0,0,2,4,6,0,2,18,5,43,7,34,29,4,27,0,2,0,0,30,11,1,4,15,164,57,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14347005422839745,0.0,0.08149393750718271,0.0,0.0,0.06702979249126538,0.0,0.05313916702166662,0.0,0.0,0.19642570794404487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901223265394255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568964389384889,0.0,0.08920709543670179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720840889656104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350333860866677,0.08527082252142086,0.16435577477312072,0.0,0.08815344030446136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967351618022273,0.1482967078169702,0.0,0.0,0.13469755161506966,0.0,0.091087415524922,0.0,0.04954178648496568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708580280022889,0.0,0.15617775869446224,0.0,0.0,0.09265962874037977,0.0,0.0,0.11685894308334607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058464195334924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098479145653103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913915014443806,0.0,0.08517555160506991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411041239370743,0.0,0.0,0.11637580938307752,0.08837860094885519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784874881065742,0.0,0.08801874569985611,0.0,0.06957976042561714,0.0,0.06408135960223582,0.06463684212615439,0.06723232539489242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364376686667438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629814045217139,0.0,0.0,0.2903821594047489,0.0,0.0,0.06043400343807943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348656148050207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271802121794837,0.0,0.0,0.22337814586919288,0.08962720784729325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764451864933135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721094773315184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386044836325391,0.0,0.08621521517405945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535188469502676,0.0,0.0821584622850849,0.0,0.06554240270988873,0.2802618103685254,0.0,0.08025615228342532,0.09968863827114627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166124480634824,0.0,0.0,0.2498893919685209,0.09685116263875758,0.17755194678661734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865906013017462,0.0,0.0,0.08403057853825642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06192440022393397,0.09530876285425588,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bex1007,2020/01/20,"Looking into Intensive Out Patient or Partial Hospitalization. CW: Suicidal Ideation Hello all,
I have decided I need help. After 8+ months of struggling alone with increasingly bad bouts of suicidal ideation, I am reaching out. I'm looking to find partial or IOP programs in Virginia/Maryland/DC area. I am not having luck.  Everything seems to be for teens, eating disorders, or for substance abuse.  
I am a woman, over 18, with GAD, OCD, autism, Depression (I guess) and maybe some sort of PTSD.  I'm just looking for a program that is outpatient that can help me deal with stress in an intensive way. If they have ACT, of transcranial magnetic stimulantion that's a huge plus but not necessary.
I'm not at the point where I need to go in patient, but I'm really really really not ok.  
Does anyone know of any programs that fit the bill? 
Has anyone else had trouble finding programs like this too? I feel like everything I find that would address my concerns is some sort of suspicious looking retreat in California or Florida. Ugh.",4.3859456264775405,7.0750815425531925,5.2418439716312095,76.08388888888891,74.0,8.858628841607569,33.31678486997636,9.444778638647367,3.736683451536643,822,43,136,22,18,267,120,188,0.17,0.737,0.09300000000000001,-0.938,0,1,0,0,1,0,31.0,0,0,1,0,3,10,0,2,6,1,13,1,0,0,1,37,28,9,2,4,12,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,6,8,1,0,7,0,1,3,4,6,0,0,1,5,12,4,26,25,4,20,0,1,4,0,6,14,0,12,4,81,18,4,0.0,0.1547614287546159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528125564519214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882498170224229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18266282530091907,0.1338339724149732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906089653222137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466182072435096,0.11250142462557013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496999868161879,0.0,0.11430502997371368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365521798480814,0.1091149010737141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347827663648092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604458069934986,0.09331380119053424,0.0,0.0,0.3581485158690538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423343897176718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389087843166945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510150188700432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178444908227903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762709140253448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.438746189262436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122372522885975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042583496820948,0.0,0.0,0.19370375659568648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347659453989347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268590359701534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510324485983065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891007310082904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962292006335326,0.13655069753445218,0.0,0.285750628532513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367879516953787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927875539224183,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cactichloe,2020/01/20,"Possibly bipolar 2??? Help me. I've started seeing a psychologist for the first time in five years since I tried committing suicide. These past two years I've noticed a huge change in my mood, especially the past six months but it's always came in waves within the past 10 years. I've had health issues where I've had heart palpitations, vommitting, my reproductive system has been really unstable and I've had weird out of body experinces and feel like I'm going to freak out in the middle of a crowd (I forget who I am or where I am).

 I go through phases where I've been getting so aggitated over the smallest things, take everything personally or get defensive, have a attitude or short temper with strangers, co-workers or friends. I never get abusive though. Example, if I notice my roommates energy is off I instantly think it's time to move out because I've done something wrong. I've even deleted social media to get away from everyone and have a break. Sometimes it leads to a panic attack and me crying in the bathroom, freaking out thinking my life is over and the only solution is to kill myself. My concentration and memory has been shocking lately, to the point where I've left keys in my work door which could lead to a robbery. But I don't remember where I've left my keys at all until they're handed in. 

Then there are days where I wake up feeling fucking amazing, I'm ready to go to work in the best mood and smash out my tasks for the day. I'm feeling motivated, super focuses, inspired, creative and being the best and most beautiful person to be around! I'm more talkative, interactive, sometimes I'm super passionate about subjects and can talk very loudly or fast. Customers at work often ask me what I've said or to repeat it. I've even had customers ask me if I'm on meth because of my high energy. Something that usually would aggitate me, doesn't and I go about it in a positive way or... sometimes it triggers me to go back into a depressive state for the rest of the day or a few days. 

My mind feels like it's going in circles more quickly and these moods are becoming worse or more frequent. Does anybody else experince this? Any advice or help is appreciated.",5.587117527862212,6.53852391489362,6.369870820668695,76.30125,67.53427895981089,9.541675109760217,32.12841945288754,9.696096459569628,3.0928291793313067,1748,72,318,37,28,576,229,423,0.115,0.6809999999999999,0.205,0.9929,0,0,3,0,0,2,45.0,0,0,0,11,17,25,5,1,23,0,27,9,4,4,3,57,57,30,2,4,14,0,5,2,1,1,3,2,1,2,15,21,0,1,9,0,0,10,3,12,0,4,10,8,28,10,51,43,9,78,0,1,1,2,13,39,1,14,27,199,43,6,0.0,0.09930815088792333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190393985627814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974155373174071,0.0,0.0,0.056997694816384975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461393232185504,0.15671312814417887,0.09535270077145794,0.07874780904696722,0.06444926323038169,0.0,0.10218680487990148,0.09256809051200633,0.0,0.0,0.1759192587272363,0.0,0.0,0.09310058408151306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586307533215492,0.0,0.0,0.0886661220591594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692018614011924,0.0,0.09206784442548356,0.21621731913514194,0.0,0.07219052280485762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334787004245454,0.08577277897088773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001744005045593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11071923972325157,0.0,0.0,0.08008969645131005,0.07532833786708336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695193754206031,0.11975620958176067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129377253808718,0.0,0.0,0.064755966249327,0.07748646071348796,0.17516142007767185,0.0,0.2858070884067549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909239580737721,0.0,0.09932226012528174,0.11236007905863928,0.08855611359643807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748203681680014,0.0,0.0,0.09272988905865516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454800030682292,0.0,0.1821324688140189,0.0,0.05920165788169776,0.0818964424946332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463017861135802,0.0,0.06690106187874369,0.08908305072822906,0.0,0.0,0.06464399897300503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19084994430854607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374577850951285,0.0,0.09833991442392877,0.0,0.0,0.24003531796431876,0.0,0.14636964410472886,0.0,0.0,0.07923312921294633,0.09448984801397783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05369461991439934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494709017051124,0.0,0.07972812664294572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679043075113555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933338912767592,0.0,0.0,0.08543976782626732,0.0,0.12905116896617838,0.2486882425277247,0.0,0.05932533441788465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916810046372079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630191353427172,0.06736805575005378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055683568087779314,0.10741170505922934,0.08234870868595526,0.0,0.09774746546778283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05690550291254728,0.0,0.08187596779420449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231138643272943,0.06915690590244432,0.0,0.0665291702036414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24407593079718815,0.0,0.08541557565043968,0.059540419596791835,0.09163954291155532,0.0,0.16192409932765095
mentalhealth,Jjiyeon18,2020/01/20,"Friends life ruined over a song My friend loved this artist. She featured in a song that wasn’t that great. Wrote a small bit of lyrics etc. Now she thinks this artist is a horrible person and “tainted” and wants to continue listening to her etc but this song and these lyrics, which aren’t bad just obsessively keep coming back and stressing her out soo much. 

It’s like she forgets all the other good and great perfect songs. She thinks the actual artist like the girl in the lyrics. 

I keep saying a song is a song. Something like this has no meaning and feelings. 

I don’t know how to help her.",3.0075548589341707,5.318416620689661,2.7641065830721026,94.02791536050155,76.75862068965517,5.942319749216303,21.75235109717868,6.980632752743323,0.4132000000000001,472,13,98,5,11,140,73,116,0.11900000000000001,0.618,0.263,0.9694,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,4,14,0,2,10,0,6,2,0,1,2,23,18,8,0,1,2,0,1,3,2,0,1,8,0,2,10,8,0,2,5,9,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,9,10,10,8,16,5,9,0,1,0,1,16,5,0,0,6,60,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.17319010418094954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364674030610354,0.14818430192432908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937568521350596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287909070286712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3958633173837631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897367470652209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742336561758512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885770022495126,0.0,0.39133386591943453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895782378499595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154960607122647,0.0,0.0,0.09753567790575914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535591724522066,0.2601161192618142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017821393603618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933224210721123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13046462482599847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549644186508262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113532910087764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662900868122885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032971364298035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274377659740408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046794168383322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anoonnn,2020/01/20,"Too scared to visit my home town!!! Hi, so i'm 22 F living in the uk but I was born in a small town in north Brazil and i am hoping to visit there again this summer coming up...but im terrified. 

Last time I went I was 18 - BY MYSELF (I wouldnt dare doing it now) and i had a great time with my family and didnt have these worries that I have now. Minding that when I was there we got burgled whilst we were sleeping but it didnt seem to affect me then and idk if it does now? 

Lately ive been more and more anxious in every day life but i feel like its because an obstruction now because i really want to see my family in brazil. Im scared of the long journey flight there, scared of the mosquitoes, the snakes (heard a family friend nearly got bitten), the spiders and im scared of getting robbed (as ive forgotten the language a bit and me and my bf stand out like a sore thumb). 

All of these thoughts have arised and i never used to take much heed but now i've got older and ive had 2 immediate family members pass away - im just always on edge about my safety - heck ive even turned into a hyperchondriac! 
Its as if every few months i add another layer of bubblewrap to keep me safe. 

Questions:
1. how can i start stepping towards being less anxious about everything? 
2. Is there any underlying issues that is causing me to be more anxious? 
3. How do I calm myself if i were to feel anxious if i go to Brazil?

I'm also very hesistant to go to the NHS about it because I went before and I didnt feel comfortable opening up to the people i was given and just have sortve given up on that option. But is it worth a try? I'm scared to think ill be judged by my gp or my work might find out and treat me differently or i might not have time to go for visits. 

If you read all of this - thank you! And any input would be great :)",1.5180763941940398,3.16611013766234,3.445916730328495,90.52551375095491,78.79220779220779,6.295645530939647,20.4144385026738,7.1686216300943375,0.37634606569900697,1413,35,315,17,34,477,194,385,0.121,0.743,0.136,0.855,1,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,2,2,0,1,22,16,0,5,16,0,36,4,1,5,3,64,67,34,0,9,15,0,3,2,2,4,3,1,1,0,15,23,0,2,8,1,1,12,6,5,0,0,21,5,42,11,45,38,9,56,0,0,1,0,12,21,1,13,24,206,57,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493793745586879,0.06756732580266779,0.0,0.0,0.11044152616596976,0.08514833091008409,0.0,0.3669446973589008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629280658972637,0.0,0.0,0.14850161995125402,0.0,0.06909769517839412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865254589564374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341775651283616,0.0,0.06994911640891498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236915893205358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483975735613637,0.0,0.0,0.07106121339299512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05363375593681295,0.0,0.1368339071532093,0.0,0.07297993913952944,0.0,0.3062035051245758,0.0,0.12317589287907983,0.05801137483133492,0.0,0.0,0.07421798824428545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273716651144116,0.0,0.042425168730717534,0.0,0.1384484545137269,0.0,0.1948361544619061,0.17905298897382765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145313919248408,0.08065281154755886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508523073563343,0.08475474042660364,0.0,0.07217687708585524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619120931826274,0.0916004189596134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057356016493940364,0.07934327980989499,0.0,0.07170365686822011,0.07186201967457355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17228690935672708,0.0819917903315813,0.0,0.06481538770835023,0.0,0.05969348187016681,0.0,0.06262868987113594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056295873105144376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096584289205713,0.0,0.08122488424375435,0.0,0.05202066319832306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4064913922743941,0.0,0.06470820556165231,0.07392407911653455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126155335334481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574758373520593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610544821797665,0.0,0.0,0.07476072918922344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05203154563112331,0.0,0.06446603975602838,0.14205020878336524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05513144530800483,0.08832544762402306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701332418197195,0.0,0.06700090466278552,0.047895579967002715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15055182144149948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05911668529854315,0.08246549636475485,0.0,0.0576842171425992,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,noneno23,2020/01/20,"Looking for advice regarding hynosis for CPTSD and anxiety Throw away account.

I was in a job for many years that exposed me to muliple violent attacks including beatings, being held hostage and having petrol thrown onome.i was exposed psychological trauma immediate and third party. The events were so constant,  and even if nothing did happen on shift, the high threat was always constant. My treatment (psychiatrist,  psychologist and GP (none cjosen by me) are all under one roof and report to the one gp and is absolutely abysmal. A pill farm. I don't need anti depressants as i don't have a chemical imbalance but every session with all 3 practitioners don't last more than 5 minutes and simply give me a script i dont need and a certificate send me on my way. This has been happening for over 15 minths now. Uve never seen a treatment plan. When i question the treatment, they get extremely defensive and treat me with disdain. Clearly just for money. But im suffering,  a lot. Ive started to become agrophobic, scared of human interaction and lost all confidence.  I xant trust any one and am starting to become gery angry. Ive never suffered from anything like this. I need to help myself cos these shonky quacks are not it. So, does anyone have experience with hypnosis for severe trauma and or emerging phobias and woupd you be kind enough to tell me your experience?
Thanks to any one",6.153602756892233,8.124412869047621,6.392949039264827,72.85146616541356,67.13492063492063,9.114786967418548,33.898078529657475,9.549672527348893,3.539068253968253,1121,52,179,24,19,359,171,252,0.15,0.7040000000000001,0.146,0.2023,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,1,3,6,16,4,1,11,0,22,1,0,1,6,37,36,22,0,4,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,17,0,2,1,0,2,2,8,11,0,5,9,2,21,5,27,25,7,21,0,4,2,0,10,7,0,4,12,123,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276388118484535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453396785299633,0.0,0.0,0.17086499737441882,0.0,0.09610637063059943,0.0,0.0,0.08784320178660274,0.0,0.10338253229534533,0.0,0.0,0.14292191131101112,0.1180332312508132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774962495104654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715221328951346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820466976117127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993939020337802,0.0,0.1472370635578145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298090549237383,0.0,0.0829772268227447,0.0,0.105848433999949,0.0,0.0,0.24577989073977985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563632897366596,0.12051544821116153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22218784373833167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420693448739693,0.13273466730442596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13570162568461655,0.0,0.12466808447864007,0.0,0.0,0.13082399195557354,0.0,0.10240496667330044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06137632178326774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549730075890064,0.0,0.1371396494278393,0.1068058717050002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736878947947014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27945847464189405,0.19378672682073528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054507786875447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3405197228893211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073400691290291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577723811840869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192579305850034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17784268543145418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980588829128572,0.11566294164959065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971900204725176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090140281287543
mentalhealth,Toru_Stones,2020/01/20,I can't seem to stop complaining about everything and idk how to stop. Help! It's always the same obsessive thoughts and the same things/people to complain about but new events with the same people. I can't stop thinking about it and I feel like I complain about it to receive emotional validation that I'm not crazy but it doesn't seem to work. Nothing does.,2.457857142857144,5.177175285714289,2.825357142857144,90.39089285714287,81.85714285714286,6.357142857142858,24.464285714285715,7.645422480735847,1.3455714285714282,290,11,57,5,8,89,40,70,0.125,0.6659999999999999,0.209,0.7198,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,19,9,6,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,3,5,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,1,4,1,10,8,3,6,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,6,35,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863487666163863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19598480941398494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519195910186141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20127660055850968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323853870792262,0.15999372509002435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501125299705485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941325674967718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162974432498293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21489116929062171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31052484004989395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4077610236299885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5617100257910587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350152589761395,0.0,0.17779550773200042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16304213998354825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnAngryRodent,2020/01/20,"Extremely bad social anxiety. How to cope? Hi, I'm a 19M college student. I've always had problems interacting with people in person, whether it is talking, body language, eye contact, or the like. Now I've never been a social person; even in my childhood, I was known for just wanting to have some time alone. This, in turn, has manifested into a life of reclusiveness, loneliness, depression, and extreme social anxiety. I've never had it in me to ask for help because I felt I would be cast aside by those around me, just as I was in my preteen and early teen years. But, today, I've decided it's time to break the silence.

I figured the best way to start my journey of self-improvement was to confront my social anxiety, which has been severely hindering, no, denying my ability to build any kind of relationship with anyone. And I feel that if I can start to build relationships, that gives me a good platform to mitigate other problems, i.e. depression.

So here's how things line up: 

a) I never have it in me to initiate a conversation.

b) When conversation does happen, I'm super awkward. Like, slurring speech, hands in pockets, no eye contact, weird responses that aren't exactly relevant to conversation. Note that none of this happens when I am alone or talking online.

c) When I get asked to hang out, things are fine for a while, until suddenly my brain keeps telling me ""get outta there."" Usually results in me leaving early.

d) Barely any friends outside of online circles.

So I'm looking for any suggestions to help with this. Sorry for the long post, and I thank you for reading to the end. Have a nice day",4.435098684210531,6.465274049342106,5.5326631578947385,77.05444210526319,71.66447368421053,8.54821052631579,32.22578947368421,9.174902378510234,3.1657177894736845,1277,61,221,28,25,422,176,304,0.141,0.755,0.10400000000000001,-0.7758,0,2,0,0,0,0,57.0,0,1,0,2,14,18,1,1,13,0,19,6,5,3,4,35,38,19,0,5,7,0,3,2,1,1,1,1,0,2,16,10,0,1,5,1,0,2,7,8,0,0,8,7,24,10,43,28,3,41,0,2,3,0,26,13,0,4,25,146,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20881984684348107,0.0,0.0,0.08388293258716538,0.0,0.0,0.2056650677857208,0.0,0.23136070621964694,0.0,0.0,0.07048948322777315,0.0,0.0,0.08974327528021464,0.1884895884913326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841730792705005,0.06145352667370702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579505711445636,0.0,0.0,0.11197843467001807,0.0,0.11253855678228662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06501483633041097,0.0,0.17365695009218302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08822049565814592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892887352491752,0.0,0.0,0.06658479790636508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509731343071338,0.0,0.09679449019133066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788642582301522,0.0,0.10533930494840996,0.09670721800424907,0.0,0.08455558948111533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17829389145736788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13514314541109618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960556072067999,0.0,0.1049792744251857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674442638555187,0.0,0.0,0.07120587958565591,0.0985024479283926,0.0,0.0,0.08921467410956492,0.08465595585285263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332552653848952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698897414174114,0.17604877339657615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654919187472813,0.0,0.0,0.19292526535584625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083840685537596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21646684348268935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10516799043772083,0.11388787755811687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110569897769304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284980195353506,0.14270926761477107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205632873470868,0.08811336749567109,0.09281334035717233,0.0,0.0,0.13394886515108453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756755646624813,0.0,0.09555715984891308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965355637154134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111029212726591,0.0,0.059461014001484236,0.08001917939393767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716133314502882,0.0,0.0,0.0649190598782482
mentalhealth,DinoDoodle,2020/01/20,"How do you refer to yourself? So, this is just to see if others do this as well. If I'm having a bad day or I need to motivate myself I talk to myself. No big deal but what I noticed from a young age is when I'm having these talks I refer to myself as we or us, it's never in singular form always plural. For example I'll say things like ""When we get home we need to get started on that list we made this morning"" and just stuff of that nature. Is that ""normal"" thing people do? Is it specific to someone who has experienced some form of trauma? I just kinda want to know I'm not alone on this issue.",1.9248837209302323,3.0092596666666687,4.2596046511627925,87.49963953488373,76.3643410852713,6.710387596899222,20.651937984496122,7.1686216300943375,0.4517249612403096,463,10,102,5,10,162,82,129,0.06,0.86,0.081,0.1804,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,5,1,0,1,8,4,0,0,2,0,10,0,0,3,1,27,22,12,0,6,9,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,16,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,1,3,14,2,17,21,3,11,0,0,1,0,11,4,0,6,8,79,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20778510899416805,0.0,0.0,0.16693455678510116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16751197469946513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12938535352224512,0.20683368854846085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096346615605093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012414066758228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20939847567554232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102572526068785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801435154932624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18983450314159456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29751909076285205,0.1547329639211034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19656811940293756,0.0,0.22841081938147684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908685172895385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15954360462297626,0.0,0.0,0.15987069915037466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699873687941204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14200211892713016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22966554165048356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32250662413880005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26657025149457997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24132498264583516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833274913244055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18038433208721505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Idontneedyourkarmaok,2020/01/20,"My sleep has pretty much gone out the window. [TW: Death] So, I've had issues with my mental health for as long as I can remember. This is the first time in a long time that I have been without medication (can't afford to go see the Doctor, even low cost ones.)

Things have gotten worse lately. Around Christmas,  I'm always a bit more depressed. I lost my dad around the holidays years ago. This year I lost my mom only a few days after the anniversary of my dad's passing. 

Not long after this, I wake up in the middle of the night. I guess I should note that I have a habit of checking for movement of breath if I see someone sleeping. After I wake up, it doesn't look like he is breathing (the blanket he was using made it hard to tell). I try to nudge him. Nothing.  I nudge him a few more times, still nothing. I grab his arm to shake him and his arm is ice cold (turns out he started sweating in the night and took his arms out from under the blankets to cool down).
I gasped loudly because he still hasn't woken up. I almost fall off the bed trying to turn the light on. He wakes up. He asks me what's wrong and I lose it. I break down crying.  I was so scared. 

Since then, I haven't been able to sleep at night. If I sleep, it's a couple of hours during the daylight. I don't know how much longer I can survive this way. I don't know what to do.",1.0273930620761609,2.856058419014083,2.3896870109546167,96.6643375065206,81.00704225352112,4.770787689097548,18.264997391757948,5.3279370663704135,-0.5909163797600416,1037,22,239,4,27,334,157,284,0.11599999999999999,0.853,0.03,-0.9645,1,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,0,5,8,10,0,2,19,1,22,16,13,3,0,22,42,11,1,3,4,3,2,1,0,1,3,1,2,0,13,9,0,0,3,1,2,7,8,8,0,2,12,9,35,2,41,29,7,52,0,5,3,0,17,20,0,4,24,151,48,1,0.09969102359556377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837007740529836,0.0,0.09982615979243414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295091771290214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749229344884473,0.09319764976287696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060770722685228075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108836778017615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030622145491806,0.10950590828989187,0.0642924629865276,0.0,0.08586373254417122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203798692042476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584498087643402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479713374320354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056656706089899186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982090175589287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930357582902851,0.0,0.0,0.10596689631965556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817557701415483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405152809271002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10957515884524296,0.0,0.11245581685114203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04870399854068595,0.0,0.0,0.2646702563655321,0.08371535199439975,0.11152875542717536,0.21764905721100244,0.0,0.0,0.09433005695423204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004282182449198,0.10046510420534033,0.0,0.0,0.1167569219654293,0.0,0.0,0.14656874587785787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806598171678764,0.0,0.19131245164343613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755321761232337,0.07581951569399753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014216105666117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129304961301584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980810585883793,0.0,0.15888167753065774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246544489686293,0.0,0.3990520770422301,0.0,0.0844678807829219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056181960782254,0.0,0.15922676043912434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713434868225453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623028635377204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439191265764525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076039532313436,0.13536732226146822,0.2168704133478168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610103629255844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913009429496368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609858926365042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159366988629526,0.0,0.10899648454268326,0.0,0.1283955013938911
mentalhealth,eaaaaaggghh,2020/01/20,"I don't know what to do I've been.......hurting myself recently and even been experiencing suicidal thoughts and to try to distract myself and keep my hands busy I'll play on my phone (watching tiktok, playing games etc.) But my family keeps giving me a load of crap because I'm on my phone so much, I dont know what to tell them because I dont want them spending money on a therapist that won't work or, even worse, send me to a mental hospital. I was recently grounded from my phone and all other electronics for a week and I didn't have anything to do with my hands, I about lost my mind. I don't know what to tell them or what to do if I get grounded again.",6.038447204968946,4.683921768115948,6.891325051759836,80.7684782608696,66.82608695652175,10.204554865424427,32.757763975155285,9.23628265651192,2.557098136645963,516,18,113,8,7,173,77,138,0.12300000000000001,0.826,0.051,-0.8527,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,3,2,5,5,1,1,4,0,12,3,3,0,1,19,23,10,1,2,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,4,3,2,1,6,3,0,0,5,4,22,2,16,17,3,10,0,1,1,0,11,5,1,3,4,76,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589126539456925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013283869564005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870717893172148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18416813401054308,0.21813898540735696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556737001943885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627573345373822,0.1584116425995668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17677943227059068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935574893529553,0.0,0.0,0.2722600909537135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18026333929678529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664162978596965,0.0,0.16673833150651698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139253855288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32609993509192364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806298650774405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28866890327369865,0.0,0.0,0.19173337750179603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109800218147838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121151906431634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740035018065657,0.0,0.13246058643762795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202195662640414,0.0,0.1682857203223673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SkyrimIsBestGame1234,2020/01/20,I will not be alone anymore I will be happy for once in my life. I will make people talk to me. I am having a mental breakdown. Someone talk to me. I am shaking. Someone fucking talk to me,-1.1406666666666678,0.9285676000000008,1.7600000000000016,94.31833333333331,98.0,2.666666666666667,21.66666666666667,3.1291,-0.2673333333333332,144,6,30,0,6,50,25,40,0.045,0.813,0.14300000000000002,0.5775,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,8,2,0,1,0,2,10,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,9,1,5,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,1,1,0,0,24,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564925304536071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24560399507767794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289500570108757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636298984020291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17492375858113876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165309469596964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495747208570377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637410367349913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169054474344606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4196690569234026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5971592996762795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayaccdotjpeg,2020/01/20,a loved one refuses to seek professional help A family member of mine who is a teen has recently developed a form of self harm via not eating enough because he isn't allowed to cut himself anymore. He hasn't taken his meds in a week and refuses to tell his therapist because he cannot trust any authority figures and is convinced that professionals don't care. I want to be supportive and help as much as I can but I can't do anything a professional can do. What should I do?,7.009157894736841,6.285161073684211,8.215789473684211,70.0005263157895,64.57894736842105,12.231578947368426,37.94736842105263,11.602472056035307,4.487063157894737,382,18,73,11,5,132,61,95,0.092,0.7829999999999999,0.125,0.4348,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,6,0,15,2,0,1,0,11,20,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,3,1,2,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,1,0,8,5,9,17,3,3,0,0,0,1,14,1,0,0,2,50,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15620851679680328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22780744460543784,0.0,0.0,0.1890291432500417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800542947906214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234201415466917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350474265623549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23734855292799434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21654714958217705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30793528323317537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073193763418473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551524969411318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16886094549911815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556552882976926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268077759278265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23963431385284614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26066858088209066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20077388826396608,0.0,0.0,0.2667073264522691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548703585506058,0.0,0.18425695791411448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HellBunnyX,2020/01/20,"I’m tired and I don’t know how much longer I can act like it’s fine My family has always had terrible mental illness and I guess it’s finally hit me this year. I just feel heavy like I’m too light and my thoughts get to me almost every morning I wake up and it’s hard to do something as simple as getting dress and my anxiety has gotten to the point were I can’t ask question or buy my own things. 
I even got to the point of bringing my own lunch so I don’t even have the chance of interacting with lunch ladies anymore.
I’m just tired and I didn’t realized how much I cope just by not going to school til I missed the whole month of December and instead of think “oh maybe there is something going on, we should take this seriously” they just sent a letter that said if I missed every one more day of school they will call the state or something

I just want it to stop, I couldn’t even go up to someone and ask for the money they owned me and my basically one friend had to ask them for it for me
I’m can’t even ask I just it’s getting to me and I don’t think I can go much farther
I’m not suicidal, I can’t mess up and let my family deal with more of my fucked up mess
I just want to ruin myself to hurt myself but I can’t even fucking do the “normal” thing and cut myself too much of a wimp with sharp pain 
I guess I lived up to being a fuck up",0.8105990554312719,2.393913442953025,2.731894108873973,95.1344208302262,80.67785234899328,5.891324881928909,19.090728312204824,6.775458762138228,-0.0799094208302269,1058,24,256,11,27,354,140,298,0.138,0.805,0.057,-0.9711,0,0,3,0,1,3,6.0,1,0,4,0,19,18,4,0,10,0,24,10,1,2,0,47,61,22,1,6,13,0,3,2,1,2,4,1,0,0,11,16,2,1,7,0,2,7,11,14,0,2,9,5,43,4,36,46,10,24,0,4,0,3,17,10,3,7,8,173,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950791461845294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900636914977914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263682371996545,0.0,0.09416531866045028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.355063361519021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695501134558754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123517622604972,0.09788973035167628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135693377009228,0.0,0.15999967517326566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902164155113964,0.0,0.04800979342974082,0.0,0.0,0.10401356159864823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335847139029998,0.26334044446962834,0.1488230517707596,0.0,0.21585008386003104,0.0,0.07594053763055672,0.0,0.2091972203253432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505694057253453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164640564861588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521822765079935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970932539934131,0.0,0.09277597388599436,0.0,0.08384297464227923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953904752609118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568770700029966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578853220900726,0.0,0.2791979826606568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930312674841714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12868174566571305,0.0,0.10103395850588924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795177056011351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636621885169996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031960815501737,0.0,0.0,0.1921898209748568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045119637533643,0.21929245368773767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938281617238953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038603660057728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139091121396413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616170132492255,0.1216808110349632,0.0,0.07538004019078727,0.0,0.2182631170297646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11200845457661653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600877102168192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061144967771218174
mentalhealth,Rehallow,2020/01/20,"Should I say I’m gonna kill myself to get residential mental health care I must point out, while I am constantly depressed and wishing I were dead, I would NEVER kill myself. 

However... idk. I don’t know what to do anymore.

Nothing changes

And I’m tired of it

I feel like no matter how much therapy I get or medication I’m prescribed just for me to be too lazy to take it, things just aren’t gonna change. 

I know it’s my fault

But I’m tired of it not getting better

10 years I’ve wasted, ever since I graduated 

I keep saying I will do something but I never do

I’m broke, never had a job... I just hate it

I feel like I wasted my life

But I keep staying in the situation I’ve always been in

I never get a break for it

I’m tired of being a caretaker and giving up my life for it 

But if leave to get help then I’m the jerk for giving up",-0.8170108695652161,1.2400430597826109,2.2158695652173925,93.42478260869566,91.22826086956522,4.939130434782608,17.23913043478261,6.498293943080001,-0.18131304347826085,649,17,151,8,23,229,99,184,0.225,0.6559999999999999,0.11900000000000001,-0.9506,3,0,1,0,0,2,15.0,0,0,0,1,6,11,4,0,5,0,15,7,0,1,6,31,41,12,3,5,10,0,2,2,0,6,7,2,0,0,9,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,3,4,24,4,17,30,1,17,0,2,0,0,5,6,0,2,11,94,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09439650996372373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250836529795476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033413991770547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566618663532913,0.0,0.2400225411265233,0.0,0.0,0.12259527811692275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771123585010903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261878238595502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11472383790363097,0.16209229112510487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963553622425379,0.2176562880277476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11200485348271437,0.0,0.12058824013115647,0.0,0.0,0.0760407443973854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257806740097813,0.20167278240028813,0.25102331187314825,0.0,0.1246943717911726,0.0,0.0,0.1201233790724367,0.0,0.0,0.16026112379412746,0.11084838143518108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428533361145765,0.11432730910764695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339617247222886,0.0,0.3499874933456208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885490025708967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724353661485622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18043429417467752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384405146441004,0.12751853000180213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733659708818475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091878986025673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529758972915819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973586893889938,0.0,0.07536876092597708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3911699155992255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045778496779026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058908227556304,0.0,0.0,0.07305577539584347
mentalhealth,Mijukiuwu,2020/01/20,"suicide (sensitive) i have been having suicidal thoughts recently and i dont know what to do, i know i will not bring myself to do it but everyday the thoughts have been getting more and more appealing. i need help. i klnow i do. things got bad, they're getting worse",0.931730769230768,3.5059329423076915,2.3757692307692326,89.60673076923081,94.57692307692308,6.4461538461538455,25.73076923076923,7.645422480735847,1.9883384615384616,211,10,41,5,8,68,35,52,0.256,0.674,0.07,-0.8874,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,10,0,0,0,0,9,19,3,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,0,8,0,2,13,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,30,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102480922291653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29511559908180396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631172352739541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20139283601052616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878073575769456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767727746821121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18671149136314624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486287566318137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5508713609785512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16728919506302972,0.0,0.0,0.3998128152967305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566125589129292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,letigmo,2020/01/20,"i was doing better First time ever doing something like this. Guess shouting into the void is better than blowing up my therapist's inbox more than i already have.

I'm a 20yo female and have borderline personality disorder, severe depression/anxiety and slight schizophrenia, which means i used to hear voices telling me to hurt myself. That's controlled now. In fact, a lot of it was controlled. I felt better. For months, I felt recovered. No more crisis, no more wanting to die, no more cutting. I reconnected with friends, got a well paying job, a boyfriend, got my grades up. Hell, i won a highly competitive college contest to represent my school at Washington DC (im from brazil, so thats gigantic). 

And now? I feel like everything is fucking crashing around me. My friends all think I'm cured and see me as this beacon of hope for their own problems, and i cant let them down. I hate my job. I feel like my boyfriend is distant and doesn't really care. My grades aren't worth shit if i don't learn a thing, and this Washington competition thing is so out of my league it's laughable. I'll never do good in it. I never truly do good at anything.

I don't know what to do. I've already taken my meds for calming down but i still want to grab a knife at the kitchen and go to town. Maybe this time will be the one i actually have the guts to do it. I used to think like that when i was at my worst, and tonight feels like those days.

I've been sick since i was 9. I'm so tired of therapy, of meds, of living like this. I'm so tired, and yet going to sleep will just make tomorrow come faster. I don't want to live anymore.

I don't want to live, and the only thing keeping me here is my family. Rn i wish id get sick, really sick. That way, they would get some time to accept I'm going to die. It wouldn't be so abrupt for them. Maybe theyd forget faster.

Sorry for the longass wall of text. I don't have the guts to actually bleed to death, so don't worry. Thanks for reading anyway.",1.9365029239766085,3.940757138271607,3.3675666016894112,89.90168128654972,78.85185185185185,6.435997400909683,22.756660168940872,7.475848149327749,0.8548024691358029,1551,49,331,22,38,508,202,405,0.188,0.691,0.121,-0.9878,2,0,1,0,0,3,58.0,0,0,5,7,17,28,5,0,14,0,37,12,4,5,5,54,78,21,3,10,3,0,6,6,2,4,6,3,1,1,20,16,1,3,11,1,2,4,15,8,1,2,11,10,44,20,47,59,9,40,1,1,1,1,10,16,3,5,25,206,64,9,0.0,0.0,0.16122825048733375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18232139732064145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319539057943349,0.0,0.0819255824666283,0.0,0.0,0.06797987963365146,0.07353921189832331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191819114679368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422502350556628,0.0,0.0,0.07116003667381864,0.0,0.0,0.18530524901791126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053275744734168184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714694714308351,0.0,0.09467666893771018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472425269642034,0.0,0.0,0.07424332732471928,0.0,0.07787608254741146,0.0,0.1253082455447365,0.17704690662698533,0.15863451612490376,0.0,0.0,0.07026687486585627,0.0,0.0,0.1276464750081285,0.07637036510929497,0.0863192193914843,0.0,0.14084519728650474,0.13857643132867184,0.13213936652508354,0.0,0.09100274054906148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155893862967313,0.0,0.0,0.0931059515376554,0.0,0.0,0.08728057348014788,0.0,0.08204902823961056,0.0,0.0,0.08843426759303882,0.0,0.08923151692373861,0.0,0.1639526753476016,0.07342636310666198,0.0,0.0,0.04539955323432216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447294078272506,0.0,0.24215047984681584,0.0,0.21883485229010616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023091949354424,0.0,0.0,0.05514191485239215,0.0,0.1659829830916504,0.0899850366071344,0.1835191730974524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593743571242802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742576595278474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05597775867196141,0.06282760025585127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721306861757974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904532080673743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826310043406864,0.0,0.1058424320715864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08360436332349616,0.06582839808791803,0.0,0.0,0.09332426005453703,0.08479659135438013,0.06833472832788369,0.0,0.08266830824554204,0.0,0.0,0.06359617409917909,0.0,0.09247361958466938,0.0,0.0,0.06597137401456311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220360058295715,0.07605494542299228,0.09447018985197804,0.09591500886006496,0.16464454769109438,0.10586457371845548,0.0,0.0,0.1445093031262303,0.18989298021836928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14269469912300334,0.0,0.0,0.1948988866158913,0.0655709006720203,0.0,0.0,0.0742750965909726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499586979588487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838930932498914,0.0,0.058682814281335524,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwedgirl,2020/01/20,The last year has been horrific for my mental health Im tired of pretending to be okay. I feel like there’s no one that genuinely cares about me.  I wish I could disappear into thin air.,0.5902631578947393,3.0518722368421076,2.27926315789474,92.2578421052632,89.78947368421049,7.2505263157894735,18.12631578947369,8.238735603445708,1.0441410526315789,147,4,32,4,5,48,35,38,0.243,0.512,0.245,-0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,5,3,5,4,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31962058741778304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502936244174315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15850829671245142,0.2239549639024585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33322170694459885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3386194347984995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25553350419001764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315376869959624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159208646697044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124267036610656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.360306850373853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3604942384423003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018751592451051
mentalhealth,BlinkyHeart,2020/01/20,"Derealization Hello! I guess I just had a question. But here's some backstory. 

I literally do not feel real. I feel as if I'm like, in a big machine looking though my eyes or something and I'm watching things happen to me in life. But I don't FEEL it.
I remember a few years ago I could feel the situations or the places I was in... if that's how you say that. Like i felt like i was there. But i dont now.

I'm almost sure that 2 experiences I've had in the past year have given me this problem. One of them is when I almost drowned in Yosemite while white water rafting a class 5 river. It was a very very traumatic experience as I got caught under the raft after it flipped over for a bit. This happened in June 2019.
The other experience was when I accidentally smoked laced weed at a friends house and had a really bad trip. I specifically remember worrying that what I was living and my entire life wasn't real while under the influence. Because I didn't know what was happening to me I was very scared which made the trip even worse. This happened in September 2019.

I guess what I'm asking is, does anyone else have this problem? And is there a way I can feel normal again? I really really just want things to feel like they used to but I don't know how. It's very frustrating and depressing. 

Thanks.",1.7664262753319375,4.016215316981135,3.644570230607968,86.4140950384347,80.73584905660377,7.095737246680644,22.267645003494053,8.167268648758528,1.2615464709993005,1029,33,215,21,27,346,138,265,0.114,0.821,0.065,-0.9173,0,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,2,0,13,13,1,1,16,0,23,4,1,5,1,46,51,22,1,7,11,0,7,4,1,0,2,1,0,0,19,5,1,0,12,0,0,3,6,6,0,1,17,12,30,7,20,33,3,29,0,1,4,0,8,13,0,10,16,140,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417908206405328,0.0,0.19018370797087888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664004261847648,0.09730094551767084,0.0,0.0,0.08877770437593553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929024417422716,0.05788864061473509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367513911199376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582032944252429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179160186780997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310287211219122,0.0,0.11129607723295948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932950694775673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272224956058525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786764796963828,0.0,0.0,0.2880972610648997,0.13568335336463694,0.09117949382992566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07336827611496254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595068746121819,0.0,0.209225180574604,0.0,0.33590231724794056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10957469820754108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437850185771533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415052954979542,0.18557674771293667,0.0,0.08385418067296223,0.0,0.07974510934552112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985640658702228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304370157590484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06434947231060897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065304972797,0.0,0.0,0.09921625552050213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817337743850803,0.0,0.0,0.1063804352260256,0.0,0.0,0.21617765649636872,0.18250743188355525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21514942117058475,0.0,0.0,0.07551848988520422,0.095074656268719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674253319930904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310725440505385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950162306348065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742928835829064,0.0,0.0,0.126178563463964,0.0,0.09330078981941793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820176513666463,0.0,0.31341809945178595,0.056011712531908564,0.0753773097973166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09643966477420353,0.09677553902463863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230628020071878
mentalhealth,ladybirbb,2020/01/20,"I think I might need help Ever since I moved away from my family to study abroad I noticed something about myself that I'm mentally unstable. I'm not trying to self diagnose bc I know someone else has worse symptoms than I do but at some point every month I don't know why I always feel like crap. I'm constantly trying to be busy so I won't be thinking about my feelings too much and currently I'm living in a share house where basically I have no excuse of being lonely cs I can just go to the shared space and talk to someone. Everyone's here is great, sometimes they'll give me suggestions and advices when I asked them but idk why every month especially at the end I will still be down or having this feeling of being tired and can't get out of my bed. At some point when I talked to my brother (we lost our father 8 years ago) I told him maybe I need someone to be my mentor, like a guide so I won't be lost in my thoughts and trying to figure out everything by myself so I won't feel like crap all the time. But then again, I feel like I have to figure out everything by myself cs I'm already considered as an adult (F23). These days it's getting worse, the morning I woke up I couldn't get out of my bed and always feel tired all the time. At the end of the day where I'm about to go to bed I'm worried again that I won't be able to wake up or get out of my bed tomorrow. What should I do? I can't afford to go to a therapist cs here they won't accept insurance.  Pardon for my English it's my second language.",1.6773868131868142,3.2518060123076933,3.5324780219780223,90.4100576923077,78.1076923076923,6.612087912087913,22.06868131868132,7.447530270364453,0.6988219780219787,1194,34,266,16,28,402,162,325,0.136,0.773,0.092,-0.9221,2,2,1,0,0,0,19.0,2,0,3,2,18,13,2,0,11,0,29,7,3,0,3,43,62,18,0,4,7,2,6,4,0,9,4,0,4,2,7,12,0,0,14,0,0,4,11,5,0,1,5,6,45,8,44,39,5,44,0,3,0,0,20,20,2,5,24,170,52,1,0.0940045270878701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918601359027554,0.0833293413547939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10373633321211198,0.0,0.15643859416552708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788154314878617,0.0,0.08832034763885843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158549806191716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12125028634236767,0.0,0.0,0.09541261621443826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07852871998446233,0.0,0.16652021795594849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503247661172156,0.1584057369070772,0.0898253541079664,0.16897041499935958,0.0,0.08861910194978087,0.0,0.2851890804937848,0.2014705588037012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19645394203855504,0.09017770816800624,0.1602748172376403,0.0,0.0,0.10364032297951052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300925297661235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846860296999848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033248593134486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18370345433224086,0.0,0.0830077196613633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20523409186011746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444018252698208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09473445320383762,0.09972394782799666,0.0,0.0,0.15006703333207164,0.09991193538292177,0.06910414370910002,0.13940633141723602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702477714735052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17772932609282585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980672233782153,0.0,0.0,0.07776151622306524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389491922359951,0.07236927759790733,0.09297288097943718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507213676297103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977066973348625,0.0,0.1511145560900629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10914650134730952,0.0,0.12046861044293422,0.0,0.07462909410019798,0.10962959141863736,0.21608875052586654,0.0,0.0898253541079664,0.0,0.1914687098203328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16964892845590232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546616034606528,0.1915972882679351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605358333851023
mentalhealth,Africa-byToto,2020/01/20,"I’ve just been diagnosed with hypochondria due to the obsessive and irrational fear of having kidney issues. (Stones, deisease, failure, etc.) How do I cope? Is there a way to beat this illness? Any people who went through this please lend me your guidance, I’m pasties what this illness means for my future.",5.050909090909091,7.701506818181822,3.9327272727272735,86.45909090909093,71.72727272727272,6.581818181818183,31.0,7.554174236665415,2.1165636363636366,245,11,42,3,5,71,49,55,0.272,0.687,0.040999999999999995,-0.9298,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,3,2,0,2,2,0,4,4,1,1,0,5,7,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,6,5,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22117289567556425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301095787029738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3627261833559305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659830106882241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394638233124807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35427937307278073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225478978813414,0.0,0.0,0.3570134999458173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25815867235041073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014987519043088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,paintedskylines,2020/01/20,"vent // suicidal ideation tw hi, this is my first time posting on this forum but i just really need to vent and this is going to come off as very jumbled and inarticulate but i think i just need to get it off my chest. 

ever since i can remember, i've had more emotions than i know what to do with. when i get frustrated, my brain goes from zero to one hundred in a split second. i feel like i'm never in control of my emotions, rather that they're in control of me. no matter how minuscule the frustration is (spilling something on my shirt, getting on the wrong elevator, etc.) it often feels like it's the end of the world even when it isn't. something very minor that feels major will happen and before i can even do anything, my brain tells me that i should kill myself. i feel like my brain is lying to me all of the time. 

the frustrations become more and more of a problem when i'm around my parents/family and i'm not quite sure why this is. one of my theories is that i control my frustrations so much during the day that when i get home and/or around my immediate family, i kind of release all of the frustrations. i'm not sure if that's what the case is but that's one of my guesses. 

(this part is a little unrelated but somewhat related) sometimes i feel like a test subject. on whether or not my parents can raise a mentally unstable child. on whether or not someone with all of my issues can be successful. on whether or not someone as fucked as me has a chance at life. and i don't think the way my mother looks at me helps much - she looks at me like i'm some helpless fucking child and it's getting to the point where i hate being around her because she looks at me like that so much. sometimes i feel like i'm her test subject to prove that she can be a parent to someone like me, but i feel like the results would read: negative.

anyway, that's all i have to say. thanks for listening.",3.6513344407530433,4.742280503875968,4.649452750092284,86.34578488372094,72.1266149870801,7.802473237356957,27.7749169435216,8.192908349453996,1.7009816168327796,1493,54,313,22,28,487,171,387,0.158,0.726,0.11599999999999999,-0.973,3,0,2,0,0,1,39.0,0,0,0,6,19,26,9,0,19,0,26,8,5,5,9,68,61,29,2,7,20,3,7,9,0,3,1,2,1,2,22,13,0,3,12,1,0,2,10,12,0,6,1,12,48,14,46,54,15,37,0,1,3,2,15,22,2,8,20,224,70,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0614593324279768,0.1994562609513572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045527239095222466,0.08248363561775686,0.06355137318397283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501192393365388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433445268058832,0.0,0.0,0.2512964930524053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816560022775377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16802098405664714,0.0661486788184357,0.0,0.08329343713099674,0.09865738155226653,0.06755679344610159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081260723799954,0.0,0.26434060647957364,0.3201295662296656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063526961864727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380900255249836,0.19509896266712973,0.0,0.04244516587145316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227386858291902,0.0,0.06604363545070714,0.0,0.0,0.07373590463424001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05005973315314897,0.0,0.07491507252829822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795166139848396,0.0,0.0,0.08262780767846857,0.07777286000484789,0.041044883417660764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05275217355863791,0.3283855514021633,0.0748539185978106,0.0,0.0,0.18814958969294224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526484165038201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16470604698988106,0.11075585602001348,0.0576016208897861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182532084493822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658575490380651,0.0808764993628462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706013975518664,0.0,0.07152751649665581,0.0,0.0,0.07146338996947119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943661440354008,0.07470513910880629,0.0,0.0478450774900539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084603464814638,0.0,0.0,0.059392452622884326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06178014446792129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18984089217712746,0.11499221317167815,0.14773060756767392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169318971297672,0.0,0.14077932213817998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527791921137979,0.06875984774808938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957101728271938,0.0,0.0,0.08709876459165088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12324577498266208,0.0,0.05928141979246219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06739153129916006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05305403025368816,0.08165624486673548,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,btg14,2020/01/20,"I recently was diagnosed bipolar type 2. Though it’s been affecting me for my whole life. And I crashed really hard from a manic episode a few days ago. I was talking to someone and when I crashed it was so different. I was an anxious, insecure, clingy mess and it scared him off. He ghosted me.

I’m heartbroken because I really liked him. I just want to explain that “it wasn’t me it was my mental illness please” but I can’t. Maybe that’s what hurts the most, knowing I can’t change anyones mind about me. 

I just want a second chance to show the real me, the stable me, not the hard-drop he saw.",1.2143568726355625,3.4573605491803288,2.868360655737707,91.21289407313999,82.85245901639344,6.376796973518286,24.958385876418664,7.61054688173877,1.3293535939470371,465,19,99,8,13,153,76,122,0.147,0.754,0.099,-0.6705,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,2,8,0,9,4,0,1,0,15,15,7,1,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,4,0,1,8,2,20,1,7,7,3,5,0,1,1,0,6,1,0,1,5,66,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17349225147055752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22110569916546555,0.0,0.13685061840700133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193079129465713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20704375646889206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622195751807036,0.0,0.0,0.1986497113334835,0.0,0.20448371650848124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506498781005002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20952023144805124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756152745072382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382414540339839,0.09561795814310033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19662509782880846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19723777136539702,0.0,0.19761944791763644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148396571376265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227700007149372,0.25076400210283456,0.0,0.1932479729063507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19594792161428312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658312773311787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15731076317052034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922920004928915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308791656456452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21851222478803614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Toosparklez,2020/01/20,"Relationship issue (I wanna apologize for improper grammar and errors. I’m sick and my eyes burn right now.)

A little back story, I haven’t been the best girlfriend, I have mental issues and I’ve gotten help. I suffer from social anxiety and depression. I used to have hatred towards his family, especially SIL, but we fixed things up and are even friends now. I used to think so negatively back then but now, everything is beautiful to me and I don’t have any hatred towards anybody now, not even myself. I love school and my job. I love life right now. It felt like everything was going great. 

My boyfriend (22 m) and I (20 F) have been together for 4 years. We got into an argument 2 days ago about something small and personal. It occurred an hour before he was about to pick me up for a party. I’ll admit, I was hard on him for this personal thing that we argued about but it wasn’t the first time I told him about it but he didn’t do anything to fix it in the past. He called me names such as an a**hole and a d*ck because I called him out on it. I’ll admit, I also called him an a**hole after he said that. He accused me of being jealous and creating a petty argument because I was about to see his family. He thought I wanted the argument to happen. I denied it but he didn’t believe me. He demanded an apology from me and I apologized. He brought up some hurtful things about my family and that’s when I blocked him. I haven’t talked to him since and I don’t know what to do. I miss him very much and I love him. *this was all on text*

Before anyone says it, it’s not abusive or anything like that. He’s an amazing person but he does have little anger issues. Once he gets mad, he stays mad all day and doesn’t talk to me. Usually, it’s not this long but I have him blocked everywhere because of his choice of words. At the moment, I don’t know what to do about this situation. I don’t know if I deserve an apology or if I’m suppose to apologize. What should I do..",1.7969473684210513,3.766539330864198,3.71719623131904,87.39501461988304,79.14814814814815,7.0285899935022735,23.744314489928524,8.032893268588372,1.3422345679012344,1539,53,322,28,38,520,185,405,0.193,0.685,0.122,-0.9858,1,0,1,0,0,0,55.0,3,0,0,2,20,18,5,0,16,0,31,6,1,3,2,56,57,32,0,5,14,0,2,2,2,1,2,2,0,3,24,21,0,2,8,0,0,2,14,9,0,1,17,6,55,9,43,38,5,41,0,4,2,3,56,17,0,5,23,220,79,2,0.0,0.1097952102368171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214368054436977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410574499541171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301671946788773,0.0,0.07088998086406259,0.0,0.0,0.0647949022820301,0.0,0.15251404642601168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425103648133328,0.0,0.1694667802929828,0.0,0.15770553791119812,0.10440394583300668,0.0972482712847028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28387002130468186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11952506314449372,0.0,0.0798139282384823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109349272672214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241132368272985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16656620063826388,0.0,0.26207452557548444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897482640240266,0.0,0.0,0.07882248007244906,0.0,0.0,0.07159427363074296,0.0,0.048414668813318365,0.0,0.052664776385789286,0.0,0.07411424376417311,0.10216566510584144,0.0,0.0,0.08194509837115166,0.0,0.08301140634657626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062112718805888686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912583022703835,0.0,0.09920191140393317,0.0,0.0,0.2901607331834916,0.0919576721611864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527820350745084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06545342366534372,0.09054480464039266,0.1857533032851265,0.0,0.08200735523018868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509066838433548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933865134897517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812088770705216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868730214452257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846111141436551,0.0,0.24273968002239474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994896495796275,0.0,0.15827417759312934,0.08814751204489836,0.07369249647558747,0.0,0.09378392414087852,0.07384358001393708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665507783238733,0.10416156048065406,0.0,0.09446230935924772,0.0,0.07133956327481904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877066370745204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14896440580532988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18469145816138646,0.0593772547038092,0.0,0.07356722572642414,0.05403485728610197,0.0,0.0,0.0885472640568903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16006902398234307,0.10205957909811546,0.07645995776777709,0.05465738171703019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059674492540399325
mentalhealth,waggy1984,2020/01/20,"Trying to help a friend So, I'll try to keep this simple. I have a friend who has been suffering migraines, panic attacks, issues sleeping, difficulty staying awake and aware of her surroundings who regularly eats under 1000 calories a day, smokes cigarettes and has been asking how to find care. What would you recommend she do? She has a past history of abuse, parental drug use and mental health problems as well. She still lives at home and seems to really need help.",6.5435686274509814,8.189550670588241,6.038529411764706,77.00171568627455,65.82352941176471,9.431372549019608,30.637254901960784,9.725611199111238,2.9889607843137256,377,14,64,8,6,116,66,85,0.179,0.633,0.188,0.0,1,0,3,0,1,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,4,8,1,1,4,0,8,5,1,2,0,12,14,7,0,3,0,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,0,4,4,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,0,6,4,9,11,0,7,0,1,0,0,13,3,0,1,3,39,10,0,0.0,0.21227724633170808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674919480880189,0.20382222978756445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18266723218470204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155444359422003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20777062201095406,0.18332708517872895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637504929108576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768396768251138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19044044503888288,0.0,0.0,0.24017654106860936,0.0,0.17971373257928405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18699820420498595,0.0,0.15924709735695652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15820301025992986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18055279356326576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284608569825365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21020758167138556,0.19893779855063976,0.0,0.17103005766809953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143349289732546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477553409608895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16310202795406306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929102810647438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19096246971930667,0.1430787169072812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24327798577237486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15473813275044815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16108783054988052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12727128845350855,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yogi202,2020/01/20,"Depression while dealing with prolonged injury Hi everyone. I’m going to try and explain this as best as I can without sounding like one of those “student athlete memes”. Soccer has been a huge part of my life for such a long time. It’s helped me through so much over the years. On top of that, I absolutely love the sport and I’m extremely passionate about it. I was recruited to play at the D2 level and in the summer after my sophomore year, I had what I thought was a groin strain. I took a little break and then returned to normal activity only to feel the same pain. I finally got an MRI in September and found out that I had a torn labrum in my hip. I immediately had my images sent to a surgeon and was looking forward to finally getting the problem fixed and working towards getting back to playing. Long story short, the office I was referred to has taken such a long time and I now, after having contacted the office in September, finally have an appointment in February....and that’s not even to get the surgery, that’s just to meet with the doctor. In the meantime, I’ve been doing activities that tend not to aggravate my hip, however recently other parts of my body have been getting strained and injured because they are compensating for my hip. At times I just feel completely helpless. I’ve done everything I can to get the ball rolling towards recovery and it’s taking forever.I am so frustrated and just feel defeated. Soccer has always been an escape for me. A way for me to deal with stress, anxiety, depression, etc. and it’s been difficult without it. 
Is there anyone else here who is dealing or has dealt with something like this before and can offer advice?",5.249646739130434,6.6944863125000005,6.09796195652174,76.12388586956524,68.6875,9.315217391304348,33.60054347826087,9.653516015845867,3.417385869565217,1340,63,235,30,23,441,177,320,0.14,0.784,0.076,-0.9615,1,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,4,13,18,1,3,23,0,28,12,4,0,0,36,50,20,0,2,8,0,3,2,0,0,6,1,0,0,16,18,0,0,7,6,0,4,4,11,0,1,19,5,24,7,46,31,6,44,0,4,1,2,13,19,0,1,23,174,40,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105478368162464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981527987111766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825743129517802,0.0,0.0,0.07547462241492484,0.110597966692665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299970827706978,0.0,0.065799627254695,0.0,0.0918495553460488,0.0,0.1132770680596072,0.0,0.0,0.1198977448596758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317373314774327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3338462565483668,0.18593827245949884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048184402808532,0.0,0.11046077605649464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017057460721334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038237382501613,0.07129379093783636,0.0,0.0,0.10314193069509253,0.09701010926401306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373412978662766,0.0,0.0,0.3547311658252724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835136731527755,0.0,0.0,0.28197271076387165,0.0,0.061345167170446725,0.0,0.08633001002642156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723503521717476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624168357262849,0.1054687128336334,0.10818490293223333,0.0,0.2865722743575305,0.09064297269030278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742066406207617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934880827322656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057589333084676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314338784104413,0.08209373940042379,0.11485647748841905,0.0,0.0,0.23377844198324346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328463829122378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657838420706947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830979970920624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364566657497382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115794637746905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569283058175547,0.18882320864510085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992604999276145,0.07328462583378079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567827531369987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081018975536148,0.0,0.07858208937627956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902049802266558
mentalhealth,s-quea-k,2020/01/20,"sad girl hours It’s confusing when you’re having a breakdown or something and rationally, you know that the intrusive thoughts you’re having aren’t true and that you shouldn’t be invalidating how you feel, but you still feel like no one loves you and is there for you and that you shouldn’t even be crying because there’s people who have it way worse than you so why are you even feeling bad for yourself. 
Because I could totally think myself out of this and stop crying, but crying makes me feel a little better. 
I’m not really sure what this is, I guess I just wanted to put these thoughts somewhere and try to justify why I’m crying more than my anxiety making me overthink why my boyfriend didn’t cuddle with me yesterday.  Maybe I’m just having a bad depression day, or maybe I’m just a loser! 
Anyway, if anyone reads this, I hope you have a much better day than I do :)",8.366206896551724,6.4596420287356375,8.015488505747125,76.33461206896555,62.620689655172406,10.998850574712643,33.24425287356322,9.516144504307137,2.7710252873563213,699,20,138,10,8,223,100,174,0.257,0.614,0.129,-0.9821,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,10,0,3,12,13,0,1,6,0,16,2,0,3,3,39,34,14,0,6,9,0,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,11,8,0,1,8,1,0,1,6,6,0,1,3,4,21,7,10,26,3,11,0,3,0,2,13,2,0,6,8,93,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927845196079518,0.0,0.0,0.0848069615480752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20253980509432465,0.1478713315792123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145376762011666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683810982932968,0.0,0.5329140006608314,0.1564406624151598,0.0,0.10446464929694044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16021835136696186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453061899858977,0.0866477340031656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361173160625536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046574282886223,0.11944364539513208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665637633756638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05925489116483605,0.12156182580970247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946660276986923,0.0,0.1619205461958758,0.0,0.2436989661436733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916018546099297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218747284391509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408540312090143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192732443402635,0.0,0.0,0.12132020978391266,0.0,0.0776998062980201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933729566126988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686026448596444,0.10140168700213936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431192752459304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771606066443229,0.0,0.1925772757931828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234617473119707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153844370994886,0.09627228288852624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283290070432153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360220993189774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StormEagle119,2020/01/20,"I hate disappointing people.. So me [M20] for the past 4-5 years have been suffering from depression and anxiety. Been out of work the past year because of it, but in that time have taken steps to try to help myself like medication and seeing councillors. One of my biggest drawbacks with anxiety is hating letting people down, which has been one of the biggest challenges in applying for jobs etc. I tend to put myself in scenarios of what I think the job would entail and think of everything that could go wrong.

An example of this (and the reason I decided to write this) is I agreed to paint a bit of my Aunty and Uncle’s house..they said there was no hurry as my uncle has been meaning to do it for years but I have put doing it off a couple of times in the last week for fear of me doing a terrible job on the painting. How do I approach this? It’ll be good to get a bit of cash from it and to just be able to do something but I just have this huge paranoia that I’ll stuff up..which at this moment is stopping me from saying “I’ll be there tomorrow” or something like that..

How can I cope with this?",5.352112820512822,5.120601893333337,6.1591111111111125,81.73169230769234,67.84444444444446,9.411965811965812,29.30769230769231,9.057496981413335,2.163246153846153,866,27,180,14,13,286,122,225,0.152,0.76,0.08800000000000001,-0.9249,3,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,7,12,2,1,12,0,27,1,0,3,0,26,38,14,0,2,6,0,0,2,0,2,1,2,0,0,18,9,0,1,5,0,1,5,1,8,0,2,7,3,17,4,39,24,3,29,0,3,1,0,4,12,0,1,14,133,35,5,0.1260849148445881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929092294930436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686019381139174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753041426072985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006685448805068,0.1395105601021286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859675240160817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061800909375133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133169914600741,0.0,0.0,0.14188058289306224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587416404334807,0.0,0.07165696273418222,0.10575404451337354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489654999369688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451206066438899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3753594682852002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277603392775203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893036794292942,0.0,0.12319744119603156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734343532513088,0.0,0.12701728690012062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17087680280387338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24072463604930314,0.17482280876383288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535003286119357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963629187315015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993562717217825,0.10026778496233972,0.0,0.0,0.10047335286218152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19413265479793906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541263451883537,0.0,0.0,0.14433706194546914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158024469337676,0.0,0.0,0.14704225558781073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856033807482976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113771336350563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179131967094832,0.0,0.0,0.08956710595266085,0.13785406124102864,0.0,0.24358365391080225
mentalhealth,throwawaypieceofshh,2020/01/20,"struggling to find a reason to go on I’m really trying to find a reason and some value to going on. I’m an objective person and hate the fact that the only reason I’m living is for my family. I just don’t want them to be sad. But I heard you should want to be alive for yourself and to be happy.

The recent episode of my life that’s throwing me into a spiral of manic episodes of texting exes and feeling absolute sadness is really stupid and feel stupid typing this. A girl. A girl has thrown me into the pit of despair and I’m embarrassed. This girl led me on for three months. Miraculously blocked me and messaged me later she has a boyfriend now even though there weren’t any indications and she led me on hard downplaying anything we ever had. A few months pass.Me being dumb and depressed tried to text her asking just to be friends and to talk so I can move on and not have this weird curiosity anxiety feeling in my heart at all times so I don’t have to think about what happened . Her boyfriend texts me asking me to stop. She texts me and yells at me to not contact her and threatens to report me for harassment. I went from texting every other day and FaceTiming. To blocked. Months pass by. To threats against me just me trying to work out something so I don’t have to feel this way. It’s my fault I know for even trying to text I just felt so sad and manic at the time because I read her recent reddit post where she was looking for someone. So I didn’t believe the boyfriend at the time and just thought why not.. the worst would happen is another lack of response. 


And here we are.. that’s just one of many episodes of my life that my brain just can’t comprehend and get over or work out. I just keep replaying the past in my head and treat myself like a victim in every situation. This is so bad and I’m so self aware how this is bad but I can’t stop. I’m somewhat addicted to the sadness. 

I know I can move on if I just start exercising again and find someone new to talk to and make new friends but it’s just hard to find someone you trust after this. I literally got so close to someone and she acted like it was nothing at the blink of an eye and didn’t have a problem with shutting someone out.. how can I get over these issues.... 


I know I’m at fault for trying to text her after months so please don’t blame me I just don’t know how to cope or who to talk to besides strangers on the internet",2.2120777919475323,4.02564085771543,3.423335306977592,90.7183660502824,77.29659318637275,6.219730369830573,23.96615959191109,7.075746649084167,0.7993563126252501,1904,63,408,21,44,617,213,499,0.13699999999999998,0.799,0.064,-0.9801,1,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,2,2,1,2,33,29,7,2,23,0,35,8,4,9,3,93,71,43,0,7,20,0,7,2,2,2,4,2,0,5,18,33,0,5,18,2,0,10,13,22,0,2,11,11,56,7,73,53,6,60,0,6,2,0,31,26,1,5,24,278,74,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535495718650557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053244439136355994,0.08210091403284556,0.05989675919923827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443151064462532,0.0,0.14639368557308802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074894373819368,0.047728940007960866,0.0,0.0,0.08821356596218359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740500856466539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504948924952299,0.0,0.06743683073653026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342846039053502,0.07082384536376488,0.13193668892731691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381115807582879,0.0,0.15835665102057275,0.0,0.07517710806042002,0.0,0.2862470518168753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098366836713045,0.0,0.08181358562313522,0.0,0.08899563495468478,0.0,0.06262102144573665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384750218541244,0.08334829029752093,0.14027692365344094,0.07730177886165025,0.08035500012440923,0.0,0.0,0.09278196339627497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172140995915446,0.0,0.06959370216008864,0.0,0.0,0.17211926900973482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106065457562078,0.07650362285592059,0.0,0.06913741826125692,0.0,0.06574950628417127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226365349458754,0.07938056200533808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499827074646089,0.1664339965979325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512388764822472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512779282354201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053055868488907164,0.059548166552758415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474305711894065,0.0,0.06836565612039441,0.0,0.08594626168211203,0.0,0.0,0.07498659289764767,0.0,0.0,0.07491936520649531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831788559268803,0.0,0.10031773850475624,0.24150613565396825,0.1546170857860493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816805312575723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800876837433931,0.0,0.0,0.33170268809948245,0.06027662288475584,0.0,0.0,0.05541880540665285,0.0,0.0,0.13091908983151432,0.0,0.08185270815222198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18879575861832426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050169362208261715,0.07692610765596126,0.06215883190519327,0.13696630168812451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657915900030272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923628414414045,0.062148273980402374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258182290566204,0.07065059112622016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400185642459078,0.0,0.0,0.0556197273869952,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DarrylmSykesjr,2020/01/20,"The Epidemic of Entrepreneurial Anxiety and Depression **Why am I Studying** [The Epidemic of Entrepreneurial Anxiety and Depression](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z06maA2Ilw4&feature=youtu.be)**?**

I am studying [The Epidemic of Entrepreneurial Anxiety and Depression](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z06maA2Ilw4&feature=youtu.be) because I have walked into the snare of it. I am an entrepreneur who has experienced [the epidemic](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z06maA2Ilw4&feature=youtu.be) first hand and it caused trauma that *I can not even express*...But there lies the issue. I feel as if I can not express my trauma and it leaves me trapped. Many entrepreneurs- like me- feel the same way. I know there are others out there who have fallen into [The Epidemic of Entrepreneurial Anxiety and Depression](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z06maA2Ilw4&feature=youtu.be). I want to help start the conversation about [The Epidemic of Entrepreneurial Anxiety and Depression](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z06maA2Ilw4&feature=youtu.be). I want us all to be freed. and that's why I made a [quick video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z06maA2Ilw4&feature=youtu.be) to start the conversation. #Anxiety #Depression",9.824313222079592,13.518983888888895,6.2552988161460545,57.64381258023111,99.0,9.621509057195837,35.1648837541007,8.331364938255728,5.318428212808444,1059,53,124,34,41,293,75,171,0.18,0.7290000000000001,0.09,-0.9146,0,1,0,0,0,0,122.0,1,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,13,0,10,1,1,2,1,23,18,10,0,3,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,11,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,4,0,1,1,4,15,2,14,16,2,10,0,2,0,0,7,3,0,1,5,79,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7103293648535299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5015230543517296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660673046360582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122449174443957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18821900538493785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216828597439053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049500334479782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294047498126598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323780706837815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404393069167985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060049006727428376,0.0,0.0,0.11569551206565085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05338120002459448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033888754410744,0.0,0.11077722858829923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467619577221994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314319481373712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288942700951306,0.08672921152450795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971887445836288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,east-advance,2020/01/20,"I feel like a creep and horrible Alright so i was like super bored and i was browsing a subreddit about self development and i came across a user in many posts i could relate to in lifestruggles and in personality and i was curious to check out the user profile to get insight into my own life situation and i decided to subscribe to the user but then 10 seconds later i got anxious and unsubscribed realizing how fucking creepy i am when i realised the person had suicidal posts and i began to feel super horrible worrying about 
if the person will see a notification and be creeped out",4.317837837837839,6.74817145945946,6.279540540540545,69.81174324324326,73.14414414414415,9.124684684684683,32.72162162162162,9.642632912329526,3.783082162162163,476,24,77,13,10,165,68,111,0.171,0.7040000000000001,0.125,-0.8138,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,2,5,7,1,0,8,1,8,2,0,1,0,22,16,15,1,2,2,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,13,0,0,5,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,7,3,12,5,15,6,1,14,0,0,1,1,4,7,1,1,6,60,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270863602578963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22990419404025486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16049173684716275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032754282357585,0.14360302311298498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858323680691568,0.10502048095779157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16076767055763286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198073026531874,0.19640863326421176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20379463232187156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5265478122299904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3850278895132619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018055020910307,0.0,0.20969936990837496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22594592604097616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21987451797144772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041374577817287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BobThePurpleFish,2020/01/20,"Looking to make some changes Hi all,
I’ve been having on-off episodes where I feel very down and depressed and lonely. I feel anxious about other people and my lack of friends, and then I get really down and feel very alone. However, since they only came on and off again- I’d have brief periods of happiness, then deep depressive episodes which didn’t last too long- I wrote it off as a non-problem.

However, a few days ago I had a severe episode where I had some awful thoughts about being alone and hurting myself and drank a dangerous amount, making myself really sick. It might have been worse, had my friend not been there to help me. It’s this that’s made me think that something has to change, and I need to confront this problem before I  have another episode.

What would you guys recommend? I’m not sure what direction to go in- for all I know, I could be overreacting, and there’s nothing wrong. Would you recommend I talk to a GP about this?
Thank you!",3.6567446524064167,5.690156877005348,3.7970020053475935,88.65667947860966,73.81283422459894,7.455748663101605,26.126002673796787,8.278499904357787,1.6215564171122998,764,27,153,13,16,235,113,187,0.21100000000000002,0.6759999999999999,0.113,-0.9521,2,4,1,0,0,1,25.0,0,3,1,0,9,13,2,0,5,1,18,2,0,3,3,35,36,13,0,6,2,0,3,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,12,11,1,0,6,0,0,3,3,8,0,0,12,4,21,5,19,18,7,20,0,4,1,0,11,9,0,3,8,101,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060917188192985,0.0,0.0,0.2818346998600153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14267099955008344,0.0,0.15370931582640446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11577722231711958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561663999288886,0.0,0.0,0.2878673347008213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863301097676092,0.0,0.0,0.08774758319482702,0.0,0.2343769289540782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20638839974549736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102395703934414,0.0,0.07108584706474358,0.0,0.07732615613450773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347210049750728,0.0,0.14483862972317854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119829460851778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14565527505272008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477513630854478,0.1109072355726816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040900939662405,0.11425631361100795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12874346596581204,0.18164250111098496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433838752092226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088692598530548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055344660155946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347992520592443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943270220403628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260382502328591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743273164943278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15370931582640446,0.0,0.11255041649753296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474580140522084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282351431625395,0.0,0.0,0.10936004757152328,0.0,0.12526596642021098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718189239865641,0.0,0.10801661325270602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22452785478775325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865698382535954,0.19330654705820025,0.14876048686075286,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whimsicalspirit,2020/01/21,"Drinking When I drink I wanna kill myself. My true feelings come out cos I’m not running from them anymore. I drink frequently to escape my thoughts. I want to kill myself but I couldn’t put my parents through the pain. But I’m in pain. I’ve had therapy 4 times. 

I’m scared for my pain to outweigh my love for my parents. I’m scared to die but I want it. I’m confused and hurt. 

Who would love someone like this? No one. It’s about to be my 30th birthday and I’ve never felt so alone. I fake I’m happy to everyone around me.",-1.2850934119960655,0.7160824424778767,0.955678466076698,99.39225909537858,100.68141592920357,3.573058013765978,19.552114060963614,5.46131890053228,-0.3101343166175021,408,15,94,3,18,135,68,113,0.33799999999999997,0.491,0.171,-0.982,2,1,3,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,1,0,4,15,2,3,1,0,4,8,0,1,2,21,18,7,3,5,4,2,2,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,5,3,0,3,3,0,3,4,10,0,1,3,2,18,5,15,12,0,10,0,1,0,2,6,3,0,1,5,53,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14341086908080564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373228386866358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326568855057413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927773892940445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14370770311319309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4069371521787468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231190572146706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001347430580107,0.0,0.1329507915114688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14740153554825594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14823263133950168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063881843065766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764836713334932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.249945170346078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679489468129884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382935699334737,0.0,0.4420184686828991,0.0,0.30750418491711823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391983724002648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772608241757625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732330776508365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583499836210923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992795698634664,0.0807416809436171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16334377834824113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836354404335428,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Derekn210,2020/01/21,"Is it time for me to go? I’m in my mid 20s and starting to realize more and more how short life is and it makes me sad seeing my grandparents and my mom and dad getting older. I used to be so ambitious and wanted to be a filmmaker more than anything until I graduated college and realized how hard that is to accomplish. All through college I thought I was too busy to work on my film career and now I’d give anything to have those easy days back. It’s been so hard. Took me a year to get a job and it’s 2 hours away through DC traffic. I struggled with depression in high school and college and tried therapy but it didn’t really help. Instead, I learned healthy coping mechanisms on my own and got pretty good at talking myself out of a depressive episode.

However, with all these sad realizations about life, I feel like my mental health is starting to decline again and I’m struggling to keep myself happy. I’m open to therapy but I’m worried it won’t work and they’ll just put on medication. Not that I’m against medication, but I’m worried it’s going to change my personality in addition to helping my depression. I tried antidepressants before and it made me feel plain. I felt like Spongebob when he was “Normal” in that one episode. I don’t want to feel like that again. I love my neurotic and wild personality. Sometimes I use my mental illness to my advantage when I create art or write. I don’t want antidepressants to ruin that for me. What do any of you think? Will antidepressants kill my personality or will it be worth it? It’s hard because I feel like my options are: do I want to be happy or do I want to have a unique personality? I also feel like a lot of successful filmmakers and artists in general suffer from mental health problems that helped shape their career.",3.3148909457477984,5.3968721221590945,4.728159824046923,81.38824780058653,74.9375,8.064662756598242,28.968475073313783,8.841846274778883,2.448159714076246,1425,62,276,31,31,474,176,352,0.145,0.6659999999999999,0.18899999999999997,0.9497,3,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,2,6,15,22,1,2,6,0,24,8,0,6,2,61,59,31,1,7,8,2,9,5,0,4,7,0,0,4,20,22,0,1,11,3,1,4,5,11,0,1,9,10,41,11,43,42,7,34,0,7,1,1,17,16,0,5,19,179,61,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06753552430493172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05742965257962253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13899214008151636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934460033063867,0.0649376928006825,0.0,0.051480614447475856,0.0,0.07186167677879424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893380794055574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0544639812172676,0.0,0.21821285883122168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21350510023436106,0.2413275671126231,0.08108631188308804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824444157627798,0.08101320255872023,0.09599102703404397,0.07083358656646095,0.06754326957224241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17979955963603164,0.22695482723719496,0.0,0.0,0.17953516734971714,0.0,0.0,0.16981740204434384,0.08922723724228647,0.0,0.0,0.08316733461609334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380469832198928,0.0750640292509831,0.09343264371552466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930063681474375,0.20629273934345926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179731600663375,0.07622042639214123,0.07990968476749215,0.056371773492614075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17015122265019264,0.2553205754262556,0.0,0.0,0.09890812250020116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274415976484195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057226259569096716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29495781667019744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591714232634826,0.0,0.08080830947014367,0.0,0.08489669380488378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05410154528200993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546903466958371,0.06729660288960314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352430985740207,0.0,0.11954986445555785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17657327856698546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787860542700475,0.0,0.0,0.19315441469145594,0.0,0.0,0.054112863023744136,0.0,0.06704475019313194,0.04924412294600105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382829355534902,0.11467352399651172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14587729278338074,0.0,0.0,0.2490572715801569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296283168894945,0.1715284085776527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05438374773232673
mentalhealth,babybornfromcrack,2020/01/21,Every single day I go threw positive and negative streaks Everyday I go throw times where all I can is the positive in everything no matter what I tell my self. Other times all I can see is the negitive no matter what I tell myself. Like sometimes I will be at complete peace with my mind. Other times everything will be going wrong. When Actually nothing happened to me,4.387190476190471,6.610511242857143,5.8171428571428585,74.13619047619048,72.28571428571428,9.23809523809524,30.23809523809524,9.725611199111238,3.360095238095239,297,13,50,8,6,100,47,70,0.141,0.6659999999999999,0.193,0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,0,2,7,14,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,1,0,0,1,1,11,1,4,9,3,14,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,7,38,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.20670026692693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220833331369716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366027433033353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17846273909319488,0.0,0.38073018913688494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611369569104612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18730674459847246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348180022117816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138721284826769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20324159713757084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878862624901858,0.0,0.2209685790560352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20948982435792896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3702701844985948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3705319810806118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315857583815093,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yami-yumi,2020/01/21,"My relationship is suffering because of my mental health Ever since I got a boyfriend I feel like my PTSD (from an abusive relationship) has been compounding on my depression and I’ve been having a really hard time. I try to talk to my boyfriend about it but I end up feeling worse because I feel like a burden and even though he says nice and supportive things it also feels like he doesn’t really want to spend time with me or talk to me about it but idk if that’s just me imagining it through how sad I am. I feel really lonely in my relationship and I’m scared he’s going to think I’m so needy because of how much I wanna see him to get through with how sad I am. I don’t know what to do except keep going to sleep to try and sleep off the depression, and trying to feel better to just push through the day.",4.172114039806345,4.644664124260356,5.274007530930607,84.61487358795054,70.47928994082841,8.98569123184508,26.60623991393221,9.095868883498916,1.8170544378698228,643,19,140,12,11,213,93,169,0.223,0.662,0.115,-0.9711,0,2,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,13,14,0,1,6,0,10,3,2,3,1,31,28,16,0,3,7,0,7,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,8,0,1,9,0,1,3,2,8,0,0,3,9,20,6,27,25,1,12,0,6,1,0,10,4,0,2,8,91,27,0,0.0,0.14232796872064438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606357265474068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196804628608469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062404174981818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747040791610997,0.0,0.2069262266959848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063947113073264,0.0,0.0,0.07934114343690207,0.10865954791440888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3644315418223267,0.25745104353053466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276012818427745,0.0,0.13653911914643546,0.0,0.09607458964256582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760801696602966,0.0,0.0,0.12768679720993262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677223434515967,0.0,0.0,0.06601732037386979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760603868084763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105730971534165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830537829363981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041919027315236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308646203351938,0.0,0.0,0.3869064880750737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09552787695110723,0.12026564724762101,0.0,0.0957237271441534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936828297404303,0.0,0.24042263861248125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631593484225438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931031530812705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980542449124498,0.07697097197567589,0.11802177695633048,0.0,0.1400912018120428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244670086981385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085258180748223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224171960784138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,23Zttack9615,2020/01/21,"I quit my job After 10 months of working my ass off, last Friday I decided to leave my job at FedEx Ground as a package handler. Since March 4, 2019, I never called off or showed up late. I took a few PTO days once every few months and took a Vacation in the middle of peak season to see my sister in Vegas, They liked me so much they let me do that. But I have not been happy for a long time, the day before I quit was the tipping point because I got sent home early.  I'm heartbroken because it took a lot out of me to make this decision, but I think it's the best thing for me to do right now. When I start having thoughts in my head such as ""Man I hope I get injured on the job"" or ""I hope this Uber crashes so I don't have to go into work today.'' I think that means its time to step away. I am having regrets about making this decision but at the same time, I am sick and tired of this job. I feel like I am being mistreated, why would they keep me on the clock during break time when they're cutting hours? I worked in the Unload Section during the late afternoons and evenings (Normal days). I worked my way up and learned how to use a pallet jack. Some days I had a radio to call off trucks that were empty. I became full-time last June and was an employee of the month in June. I hated this job from day one, the first week was hell I remember having a panic attack on my second day there. But after that day I stuck with it, they moved me to the lighter boxes. I had a guy that worked there that always looked out for me before he got a promotion. The work became easy and easier it was hard being in those hot trucks during the summer in a 90-degree warehouse but I stuck with it. I saw so many people come and go. A lot of people bitched and complained about the pay but I never cared. In late August  I got moved back to working with all the heavy boxes over 70 pounds we call those IC’s. My buddy who uses the pallet jack to take pallets full of boxes of furniture or mattress got fired. He was the Fourth pallet jack guy to quit or get fired or promoted. The Managers tried to get me to use the pallet jack but all I wanted to do was Unload these heavy boxes. After a while I was like screw it, I’m going to have to learn how to pallet jack if I want to move up. Now I have mastered it. I have had to deal with a lot of workplace drama but all my co-workers that are full time like me love me like family. I feel like I have let them down, I really did not want to quit but I had to for my own mental sanity. The section I worked in, changed managers all the time after July. Some were better than others some would not let me do my job, some of them won't give me any help. The current manager takes advantage of my hard work and dedication to the company. This guy yells and doesn't let me take a break when I should be off the clock. Even though they have been cutting my hours after Christmas because they want to save money. He also makes me stop with what I am doing and moves me into a different section and when I come back to my usual place it's a fucking mess. (New Year's Eve was a blast \*sarcasm\*)  It's been a few days now since I got kicked out of work last Thursday after making a stupid decision to try to unjam a truck door with a pallet jack I wasn't thinking I should have waited for maintenance but I did not. After having a mental breakdown once I got home. I decided to not come to work the next day. I have not been back since I feel weak, I feel like I have let people down. There is so much more to my story, I did not take this job for granted even though I hated it. I spent 8 months unemployed and this was my first gig after dropping out of college. School is a whole different story. I am scared because I don't know when the next opportunity is going to come. I have applied to a dozen similar jobs. A temp agency is helping me find a new job now. But I am just anxious. I want to start working again but I think I need therapy but I am scared to ask for help. But I need to work, I want to have enough money to move out of my parent's house before they move to Vegas. For anyone that takes the time to read this thank you! I am the king of beating my self up mentally.",2.595080536232864,3.713500141402719,3.931915985682448,90.37269771054234,74.73529411764707,6.680326872425205,21.565070574728168,7.014971019744422,0.4134852299588032,3271,74,725,31,67,1077,334,884,0.128,0.774,0.098,-0.983,18,0,0,0,0,0,79.0,1,1,9,28,32,35,10,3,57,0,73,9,2,9,6,122,147,50,0,17,28,2,9,7,0,5,4,1,4,5,35,31,0,3,20,4,4,19,14,17,0,5,38,13,112,18,115,96,27,145,1,1,3,4,34,43,5,15,86,497,147,35,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03142186023732728,0.032694156161399764,0.0,0.0,0.026719960130721688,0.0,0.0,0.044388863609486656,0.0,0.02747393422363255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036732788487872384,0.04470041062498507,0.03691620029362622,0.0906395468896302,0.0,0.09580834316449917,0.0,0.10030399204282343,0.0,0.04123461128174091,0.03475064957433088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036481295148035,0.0,0.04006089176286623,0.0,0.041565808126075084,0.13538658267482895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228061255324731,0.04050840666589429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821037163376168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040599219564770105,0.0,0.07785613998880489,0.0,0.033105270006592934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037041073828156384,0.0,0.0794690200580052,0.08421080420197452,0.0,0.0,0.0359122470634733,0.06684364221827492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03632489256986492,0.06158546642973906,0.03769254113856791,0.08932237267849204,0.0,0.18855278299656053,0.0,0.0,0.11671600285942213,0.0,0.04182714720705751,0.07039596750528858,0.07758558387393392,0.040325007352031525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900995406226133,0.0,0.07882631496687588,0.07805179750025631,0.07738956324137353,0.04533778206109017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35092191709561754,0.034924603906610965,0.0,0.0,0.021593898256169274,0.0960848623911827,0.1329695248260217,0.04160463681907866,0.0,0.20089405717791886,0.0,0.1343728706702748,0.0,0.0,0.03477225220035753,0.03299544919664876,0.0,0.0,0.100214157757457,0.03546263407254635,0.0,0.10491106754528252,0.039835999521096205,0.0,0.04280059134157116,0.0,0.0,0.11879151778750513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545024579408787,0.2505675611741141,0.05776839603747828,0.0582691553009023,0.06060894500430111,0.07589706672412808,0.08357514051034927,0.0,0.03849789352114474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368956051588369,0.026625328648760653,0.0,0.0,0.046100787077981945,0.04362920223820802,0.0,0.0,0.0817205377603947,0.0,0.0410518581688084,0.0,0.03714371362600522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16716784421480582,0.039302710564757495,0.0,0.02517151102283825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04451026435466997,0.03355521955698003,0.0,0.0,0.07867644841293461,0.03976568020529644,0.031310698661291214,0.0,0.040990206189781386,0.0,0.0,0.09750843779843997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05562226947928863,0.0,0.0,0.03284993623174302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477137618683046,0.0,0.0,0.03617486596984842,0.04493391504043215,0.0,0.02610391041312916,0.10070710705059613,0.07720853343256996,0.03119352062335697,0.16038068486931245,0.045160463069229294,0.03724429523483564,0.0,0.13096483177170504,0.05335348294137792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180721818956116,0.0432746723010475,0.0,0.1390529122423995,0.03118822227982941,0.031517734565507084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03545498851570249,0.043868201406527065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4004714061283768,0.0,0.0,0.055823929122669765,0.0,0.0,0.025302809714064053
mentalhealth,babybambien,2020/01/21,"Is this normal or something more serious I should get a second opinion on? Hi, I'm 19F, and haven't been on medication in about six months. I guess I'll start from the beginning. In 8th grade I was having problems with an eating disorder and self-harm, continuing to relapse off and on for a few years after. I was very depressed and anxious all the time. When I was a junior, my guidance counselor I saw every other day due to my awful mood swings and feeling helpless about it, recommended I see the in-school therapist we have on campus. 

I started seeing her because I had awful mood swings between being depressed and borderline manic, where I would cycle between feeling so elated, and energetic, and happy, and wired, my mind completely racing to being so fucking depressed I wanted to hurt myself or felt like there was no use in being alive - they were really extreme mood swings, and had nothing to do with my menstral cycle which is irregular as fuck due to PCOS. My therapist gave me a diagnosis of cyclothymia, generalized anxiety, and social anxiety. I remained unmedicated but in therapy for a while at which point my diagnosis actually changed to CPTSD as we started talking more about my past and saw how dissociative I really was. 

Dissociation came on pretty gradually - I remember doing it once in middle school and it really freaked me out back then. Eventually though I was having dissociative episodes so strong I felt like I was high on weed, and this was before I had ever tried it. I wouldn't be able to focus, I'd forget what I was talking about in the middle of speaking, lose my train of thought, forget what someone said right before the last sentence they spoke, I couldn't listen no matter how hard I'd try because my mind would go totally blank. I'd feel floaty, things would feel unreal, I'd feel unreal too. These started maybe once a day but it got to where I was dissociated pretty much constantly, and this was between therapists. 

At one point before or right around when I began dissociating so hard I was having these really traumatic, really severe nightmares that still confuse me because it was more like sleep paralysis. They started out when I heard someone carrying a foldable metal chair downstairs, and I assumed it was one of my parents early in the morning, and then I felt really ominous and uncomfortable knowing I had to be having a nightmare because they wouldn't do that. They got to where there would be this presence of something, more like an entity that had no real shape or any way to be seen other than how it made you feel, and it would make it to where I couldn't move or talk and I'd be paralyzed with fear trapped underneath it, it would say awful things to me. Eventually I could move, it would get to where I'd just be trying my hardest to wake up to avoid it but it'd track me down and make me feel so fearful, and these weren't just like you wake up and it's over. I'd wake up, and think I was awake, until I ran into it again, and again, and again, and I'd fall asleep or wake up like 7 times during one actual nightmare, and they were so realistic and confusing I woke up and felt scared I was still in a nightmare for three hours after I really woke up. They got more and more violent until it was literally assault. I'd do this is the time of sleeping for 7 minutes, once it was just two minutes before I jolted awake again. I'd fall asleep staring at my phone because I didn't want to fall asleep and I wanted to see if I could figure out how quickly I'd start dreaming. It was really bad, and really confusing, and I'd avoid sleeping for as long as I possibly could. 

Some time after my dissociation got so bad, I also began hallucinating. My therapist told me it was due to how severe my anxiety is, which makes sense, because I do it signifiganctly more when I'm stressed or crying or upset. The first really noticible one I had was when I drove to a nearby city without having permission to, and having the cars serpintine belt snap on the interstate and having my car eventually die in the middle of downtown. I'm terrified of my parents, they couldn't know I was there. I had a slight panic attack and started crying and shaking and I also hallucinated something much more vivid and aparent than any weird shadow blotch of light thing I had before. It was like a ton of embers were in my upper periphreal vision, but they were more skinny and flat like shooting stars than they were embers, but they were really short, sharp flashes going in all sorts of directions, like skinny peices of glitter confetti but miniature in this bright yellow white glow. It lasted longer than anything I've experienced again yet. I started out seeing dark spots in my vision, some of them are weird shaped blotches of darker spots, some are smaller, and more opaque, usually circular but sometimes lines and colors going across my vision, and light spots which are usually much much tinier or are total flashes in my vision, always in random places, and none have stayed more than three seconds, and most vanish before a stopwatch would hit one second. This began with maybe one noticable one every two or three days, then two, then every day, then a few times a day, then every day every hour multiple times an hour. 

Once I began hallucinating more frequently I started taking Lexapro and Abilify. It helped me a lot - I quit dissociating almost completely, my memory improved drastically, I could focus, and think clearly, and I quit hallucinating completely. ((Unfortunately my parents are quite literally abusive, narcassistic, and horribly uneducated. Despite living with my grandmother since 9th grade, once they found out I was on antidepressants, they forced me to live with them in an unfinished house (no floors, appliances, ect.) with them and off my medication and made me so suicidal I had to leave and am back with my grandmother that's skipping a TON of important traumatic bullshit but they've turned my grandmother against medication and so I can't get back on it out of respect for her and not wanting to be homeless until I go to university and live on campus. so.)) 

Now that I've been off my medication since early October, late Novemeber, I've just gotten more and more dissociative and hallucinate more and more frequently. I'm worried they're going to increase in severity too. It's easy for me to tell whats hallucinated and whats not, like I don't confuse reality at all, not even for a minute, but today while I was in Mars waiting to talk to my hiring manager about a job I knew I was getting, I hallucinated like, a full on shadow. Like the sun had come out and was shining through the door behind me and it cast a shadow on the right side of some imaginary line and then it faded once I actually like, stared at it for a few seconds. The sun did not come out but thats exactly what it was like. Not bright sun, but just like the clouds went away. But I looked and theres no way that happened, and I could just tell, that it like. It wasn't real. 

I'm worried that maybe this isn't just hallucinating from anxiety and that I might have some more severe thing that's just now coming on or something. It just keeps on getting worse and more frequent, and I don't know anybody else in real life or online that has such constant psychosis from anxiety. I was traumatized a lot when I was younger and throught life, sexual abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, verbal abuse, all that. I just want to know if anyone else is experiencing this and has been told it's from severe anxiety/ptsd, or if I should be worried and get a second opinion on my diagnosis.",8.650112754357979,7.6398597345378745,8.739244584952385,68.50535387446293,61.45309242529535,11.692865742054831,36.4594054948174,10.829452680783568,3.910164787753623,6094,233,1073,129,71,2003,502,1439,0.166,0.7559999999999999,0.077,-0.9992,5,3,4,1,2,2,149.0,2,2,16,6,68,55,5,13,44,3,119,21,12,12,9,242,218,139,2,30,44,3,14,16,0,13,6,6,1,0,75,95,3,4,23,1,0,21,25,31,0,20,86,42,137,21,159,98,44,198,0,6,18,2,44,86,2,36,104,776,212,9,0.03428235059547369,0.12185693869254545,0.10036388667796732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03432882204608336,0.0,0.0,0.054831166770656366,0.028525661997280818,0.0,0.0,0.046626347993632,0.0,0.13112952185308702,0.03872929808974778,0.0,0.02397101664070948,0.03512631948582298,0.02821145349449642,0.03051856031037265,0.0,0.0390011229631746,0.03220939689042016,0.07908303445411757,0.05724866154495902,0.12538921635436015,0.0,0.17503053205389882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03920987615881536,0.0,0.0,0.03626618125254229,0.08859362841367813,0.10783317705101778,0.07409408393106705,0.0,0.1368583368511449,0.0,0.07531510470792115,0.1326556801558653,0.0,0.0885820150003832,0.0,0.03557966743296697,0.0,0.03929054386598031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035079403257378274,0.05727700981474328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0226431692437615,0.03101034881521793,0.14442179481171802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715435096142118,0.12133930571316755,0.0,0.13166573104858198,0.0,0.0,0.029160549903363,0.0,0.03758882793435786,0.0,0.06338696141415512,0.1074666794057674,0.0,0.09741724940243596,0.0,0.10967491009411118,0.0,0.03776587420729552,0.0,0.030315769412375876,0.03649419968660075,0.06142050478728282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02297873696321002,0.03622118563577558,0.0,0.0,0.10128362904868264,0.03955722975067815,0.0366999653568945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034019943112531564,0.030471728388118294,0.0,0.0,0.07536273330539865,0.05588938267938605,0.03867198470578033,0.03630005929995078,0.0,0.0,0.048429276150278165,0.2679779973205187,0.0,0.0908158309727462,0.03033880147433468,0.02878854026956958,0.03835318123066606,0.0,0.058291257055625975,0.0,0.06487757809199361,0.06865120568788141,0.0,0.10332368710277663,0.0,0.0,0.13814344615493732,0.0,0.03636815638685608,0.06923080260365311,0.0,0.027363845172604238,0.07287342649504397,0.10080588906195584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03358942475132733,0.03289483999646555,0.07806136674967325,0.0,0.2190575071757596,0.1626142559838996,0.0,0.0,0.04022295187871342,0.11419947988082707,0.0,0.03272638277220615,0.0,0.0,0.0358177597458935,0.0,0.06481580469540743,0.03864819927856651,0.0,0.06975495056621939,0.0,0.032803579587289154,0.04007423327539435,0.0,0.0,0.10939049926869608,0.0,0.11706246101805172,0.24158366805339435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03883522027982423,0.08783082027885977,0.032610365995588565,0.027262701186319103,0.03432261355048515,0.06939113809993384,0.10927437949479307,0.0,0.03576396837392764,0.19364649044873888,0.0,0.05671742935322367,0.0,0.10292132669722998,0.03494653915387353,0.05809464881822446,0.10556891349002928,0.03390612133635838,0.0,0.21838701781589784,0.03654042432288505,0.05475585893972574,0.0,0.03927031677914311,0.0,0.0,0.0374993273007893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025776061156622825,0.1102194192651257,0.05992857095242481,0.0,0.0392048556424043,0.159217805413145,0.09110268166289216,0.04393349200186682,0.033682235399051706,0.027216356997084613,0.1199418859414874,0.0,0.032495659834469094,0.06551651026366857,0.0,0.06982639710519484,0.037289353023084,0.10046662533422022,0.0,0.0,0.02960894377802781,0.07551433161380733,0.028286529579467163,0.10110309303143306,0.054423468381230564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03178008246217748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03304696260550274,0.0,0.0,0.10444617340380698,0.03493664407993678,0.19482558603467096,0.0,0.0,0.022076709792469614
mentalhealth,kcake55,2020/01/21,"I really don’t know what to do I am currently on the side of a bridge in my moms car. I just witnessed a man trying to kill  himself. I currently suffer from mental heath issues, and this has set me off. The current status is that he is alive, and there are ambulances everywhere. It is in the middle of a highway. I really need help. Please give kind words and prayers",2.186525096525095,4.2841436756756766,3.8409652509652514,86.35364864864866,78.45945945945945,7.4718146718146725,22.73359073359073,8.418075326091056,1.4759212355212352,288,9,58,6,7,96,56,74,0.10400000000000001,0.7490000000000001,0.147,0.3274,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,6,0,8,0,0,0,0,7,11,3,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,8,1,9,11,0,11,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,0,3,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851961640185277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19927316419623026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3103027771583697,0.0,0.0,0.3289171485655483,0.30959102107761816,0.1633876826246753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29960733315368043,0.0,0.0,0.3481928406284894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22044334330397689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3263448795079413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38091453478141946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018464159257672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fake__smile,2020/01/21,I want to kill myself Nothing will make me stay. People say it gets better but it doesn't. Life sucks. I just want to die.,-1.80153846153846,-0.2327426923076921,0.05338461538461559,103.9416153846154,110.53846153846158,2.08,9.046153846153846,3.1291,-2.273636923076923,94,1,22,0,5,30,22,26,0.253,0.524,0.223,-0.6105,0,0,0,0,0,2,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,5,7,1,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,12,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2970904594790692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486278387174665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755022783071364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3716413532099811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23726744926343585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242265802456427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223205218129366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328819020603853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26713393569777844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35804182772385906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3962639940646596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lindahasacat,2020/01/21,"My friend is self harming and denying it. I know she is. Yesterday, I asked her carefully, straight up, how are you doing, I've noticed cuts on your arms, are you cutting yourself? 

She then denied it and insisted it was cat scratches, but I know it's self harm.

I don't want to pressure her into talking about it, but I don't want to pretend it's not happening.

I can't find any information about this specific situation, and I'm really worried and concerned for her. 

Does anyone have any advice?",3.666726804123712,5.520880041237113,5.074832474226807,80.27451675257736,73.32989690721652,8.148969072164949,31.712628865979386,8.841846274778883,2.827763917525773,392,19,73,8,8,131,65,97,0.201,0.711,0.087,-0.8817,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,0,0,3,7,2,1,0,0,10,1,1,1,0,15,18,8,0,2,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,7,5,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,1,15,2,8,17,0,6,0,0,0,0,14,4,0,0,2,49,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21967607062355465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057491410995714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571883294437178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21016158847943356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22920287283842625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19672767766492816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054669737696948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368317372822048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19879361902571696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470930275537415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559410812104661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440153323163533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4690396345917563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25268934912408364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18068910724794626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651906931342129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282995858458421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AkaKda,2020/01/21,"is smiling TOO much related to some sort of madness? recently, noticed some characters in movies, games and other forms of entertainment have creeply big smiles on their face and show some sort of madness. 

is this just a thing that entertaiment picked up because of joker or is it related to some real condition.

exemples of characters:
most jokers from dc comics (i assume)
jinx (league of legends)
ziggs (league of legends)
gamzee makara (usually just REALLY shows it when sober & pissed)
jevil (deltarune)
cicero (skyrim)

while writing this, just noticed that pretty much all of these characters have some sort of thirst for blood, are chaos seekers or love to blow things up. btw feel free to add any characters that fit here.",6.1651298701298725,8.915487706349207,4.985209235209236,79.72292207792209,68.76190476190476,8.708802308802309,30.5021645021645,9.339509955726095,3.041628571428572,585,24,95,13,11,172,88,126,0.068,0.772,0.16,0.9102,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,0,6,6,3,0,1,0,6,5,4,1,1,23,8,6,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11,3,1,0,2,5,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,4,19,8,10,10,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,12,4,60,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618725275093156,0.0,0.16435843780910972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733283222128507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220643226126103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21813592191922174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3553419721065073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.550334514466908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24588704022200716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27509772259588106,0.15483369768399194,0.0,0.2386410965219473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211380492501491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661889277268623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Personal-Serve,2020/01/21,"I dont know what's wrong with me When people think its their own semi conscious effort right? And it's just them thinking either sad, happy, or mad thoughts. These past few years I no longer experience this now my thinking is broken into three different voices(?) Like they arent auditory voices but like mental ones. As in there's ""my"" voice in which I manually think(if that makes any sense at all) and there's the other two which work without any effort on my part. One is very pessimistic, negative and cynical, but is very logical and practical in dealing with information. Then the other is extremely arrogant and dismissive of other people and their issues, to the point of being cruel and self serving. The thing is sometimes these voices can hold discussions with me and with one another and sometimes speak simultaneously. I know this cant be normal and I cant just google it either, does anyone have a clue what's wrong with me?",4.444568965517242,6.991673155172412,5.062744252873569,78.13480603448278,73.19540229885058,7.798275862068966,25.81752873563219,8.660442795831766,2.1439321839080465,755,26,128,15,16,242,111,174,0.16399999999999998,0.77,0.066,-0.9656,2,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,4,3,6,9,3,0,5,0,13,0,0,1,1,37,20,16,0,1,8,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,1,16,16,0,1,9,0,0,0,7,6,0,5,1,5,15,3,16,17,6,13,0,1,0,0,9,8,0,1,7,98,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958357676892941,0.15098567839581745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068089499026003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14844698267652806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504385133853018,0.0,0.0,0.1260062927493117,0.0,0.16875477024107532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14084948446211662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327963521414845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502877607088438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582658664800635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069211692354394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611419399261878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14510767710156364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107926238006796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927132928193276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592673414717986,0.13745439155483485,0.19964855448877486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611673889469156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229663545487205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15021258373227747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848188454381613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566030994129393,0.3690509552509713,0.0,0.11431167988875933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065694288107095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376130438616997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388008619618227,0.0,0.10482616322495067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148601060901408,0.0,0.09272459877948226
mentalhealth,glory2king,2020/01/21,"Question about trauma and some advice would be nice Okay so my grandfather recently passed away and my reaction has been unexpected. Emotionally, I haven't felt as sad as I should be because I'm close. Due to my history I know that it's not based on having some sort of antisocial disorder, I know very well I can feel empathy and sadness over loss. This isn't to say though that I have been well off mentally afterwards. Instead of feeling sad, I feel anxiety over the events of his passing. When he passed, he was having breathing problems and at first it seemed like he was just having a panic attack. Except as you can tell, it ended up not being the case. He fell to the ground and was taken away by the ambulance and announced dead by the time we got to the hospital. 

What this ended up doing to me was effecting my anxiety and OCD. I always had an innate fear of not being able to breath, I used to be able to take a deep breath to convince myself I'm fine and then relax. After this happened, the need to do this kept coming and coming. I spent days constantly taking deep breaths and panicking every time it wasn't a full deep breath. I did this so much it feels like I strained muscles that are involved with deep breaths to the point I can't even do it at all right now. If I try to take a deep breath I feel a sort of strain that stops it from going all the way. I can't really explain it except to say that I don't have any other symptom such as coughing or even regular breathlessness, it's just an inability to take a deep breath that feels like it's because I've overexerted myself doing it constantly for days on end.

Whenever these episodes were at their strongest, I started thinking of the events surrounding my grandfather and start thinking it's going to happen to me. All the details involved with him come to my head and I start to think something to the effect of ""this is it, it's happening"". I start thinking about how this could effect my mother I look at my cat and get scared that I won't be able to care for her and my anxiety just heightens. 

​

I'm sorry if this doesn't make any sense, if you have any questions I can clarify. But what I wanted to know is first of all, can this trauma block any other emotion mentally? 

And also, am I right to assume my constant deep breathing has made my breathing worse?

Any other advice would be nice, or even replies that relate to this in any way or fashion.",4.542195834855684,5.672372325051764,5.1950146145414715,83.11913500182683,70.05590062111801,8.24964072585556,28.28455730118134,8.583994105835817,2.0157928875898183,1935,68,377,31,34,624,220,483,0.11599999999999999,0.804,0.079,-0.9535,0,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,1,2,1,6,19,25,1,5,20,1,48,13,11,7,4,81,95,33,1,10,15,1,7,3,0,4,2,2,0,0,38,22,0,3,22,1,1,9,11,13,2,2,16,10,47,12,61,67,8,65,0,4,1,0,20,28,0,14,29,267,85,0,0.22234234889460106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484691336410735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05926903202697811,0.06166888191817155,0.08030261404454936,0.09005676349659253,0.3024008433846997,0.0,0.1700912883265987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431550675042608,0.13926530389935818,0.0,0.0,0.09035855478605198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07556428101293675,0.0,0.0,0.19152824603566726,0.0,0.24027309058851795,0.0,0.059174091143582415,0.0,0.0,0.09559494740895184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494119822365033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673681069628166,0.19692932641508906,0.0,0.0,0.14685502448424964,0.0,0.062444339496858826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339898578631763,0.22484594448239656,0.10589427898426997,0.0711611742917547,0.0,0.0,0.1260828589240707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03872156681846689,0.0,0.08424152050549517,0.0,0.059275829257043625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19661660483061214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606246524502325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221935401977079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862524072405272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06223719157332255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012856884572025,0.0494717481345935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14937919480479184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448240315869484,0.05495467813855786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695694669750788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700617957012421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091719996733868,0.0,0.0,0.16604954413263825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047479400701036664,0.0,0.07317874865086138,0.0,0.0,0.12658610073202312,0.0,0.11787704000627733,0.07420115972662335,0.0,0.0,0.06747070794634208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057056667614470015,0.0,0.08296468538376324,0.20983341191651728,0.0,0.0,0.061962719835742426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770329446221262,0.22289836736267385,0.0,0.06477900435653593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899573325081341,0.07281674296506,0.0,0.0864330744468316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0503186199881133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401080044147738,0.0,0.06115190780418382,0.043714426023218636,0.1176566715787132,0.0,0.0,0.1332749825992593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552861625396054,0.10529708356072492,0.0,0.09005676349659253,0.0
mentalhealth,DelvornAwbilan,2020/01/21,Help I’m in a very dark place. I’m being harassed and I feel like ending it all. Please. Someone help me.,-1.9676086956521743,-0.2391165652173885,0.5046739130434794,101.68570652173914,105.95652173913044,2.3000000000000003,14.445652173913045,3.1291,-1.487078260869565,81,2,19,0,4,27,19,23,0.126,0.505,0.368,0.6908,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,8,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.328229403602447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18737953255455606,0.26474687647071704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4967922761528043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18104971274758905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3871837346705714,0.4067923951413569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31399650973975696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057724503471588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,welpie,2020/01/21,"Bad dreams making my sleep feel less restful Hi everyone! I'm a 25 year old woman. I've had mental health issues for half my life by now. Mostly stress and low energy related complaints. Right now I'm not in any therapy as I've had so much therapy over the last few years that it felt like the same things being repeated over and over, even in intensive fill time group therapies.

One thing that I never considered a huge issue and never really discussed in my therapy sessions is that I have frequent nightmares (almost every night). Well, not really nightmares, more like bad dreams. Things going wrong, mostly mundane but slightly important things (like missing an exam in school, disappointing a loved one, missing a flight, giving a bad concert, being left alone by friends). There's no monsters, noone is dying - but it's always incredibly stressful and I feel more and more like these dreams are a huge contributing factor to two things that are and have always been huge issues (except when I was on sleeping meds): Waking up frequently during the night and being extremely tired and struggling to get up in the morning (in more 'productive' times of my life I've always been a morning person).

One thing that might be important to note is that these things are always related to current events. Like if I have an exam, I can guarantee dreams about it will happen at some point leading up to it. Also, if I read a book or play a game or watch a movie this will almost always come back in these dreams and never in a good way (often I'm in a similar predicament to the antagonist, for example). I wish I could do something about this but I could hardly avoid all forms of entertainment.

I was wondering if this is something others recognize, and what my options are to prevent these bad dreams (or at least how to handle them). Most information online is targeted at full-out nightmares but that's just not the case. But that doesn't mean that these dreams aren't causing me a lot of trouble...

Thanks in advance!",6.918653913043477,7.597310581333335,6.753762318840582,75.68128695652177,64.52,9.721739130434784,31.50434782608696,9.653516015845867,2.9550869565217392,1608,57,277,30,23,508,201,375,0.157,0.688,0.155,-0.6243,1,2,2,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,1,2,14,26,0,4,21,0,31,8,3,4,4,57,50,26,1,6,16,0,4,5,1,3,4,1,0,2,30,11,0,2,6,13,0,5,9,14,1,5,7,6,18,12,39,34,17,54,0,4,1,1,11,27,0,17,26,201,48,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15633224526165246,0.08084693728633749,0.0,0.06242480007081105,0.3247621475056333,0.0,0.0,0.05308368621278743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060023558443690526,0.2607083862514579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018943897330047,0.0,0.06724204337293402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246496081572136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101427552614243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05155809720130925,0.0,0.0657691761672594,0.07458996945393277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893927430577569,0.05576629960167733,0.07495013712970566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06030920029062234,0.0,0.04078328908714236,0.07488256032469906,0.04436347191247345,0.06547328276811673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902847252826091,0.0,0.06992670332243098,0.0,0.0,0.08297445709374084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24442404240725055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06362956955548223,0.0,0.0,0.08481275299667347,0.0,0.11027260805520964,0.19068161744670126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636408236202387,0.070452475609106,0.0,0.05210586170953157,0.0,0.0,0.08503055952862101,0.0867074047034894,0.0,0.07866643044029574,0.08280965097421376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738330808255409,0.0,0.18061476528536527,0.0,0.0,0.14650862213475088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191116204370973,0.0,0.15868705466496247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815924998162577,0.0,0.0,0.07379222234068666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808143218495296,0.0,0.10001486425136936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666307648101291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900119909344319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15623336435572746,0.0,0.0,0.1201892774938106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17883563805301678,0.08160558258660608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186744383368995,0.3570750606885618,0.0,0.3630186002384148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103518662820463,0.08971884086139892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625357826763245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06196063904801995,0.0,0.0,0.07018559151946868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976550175689647,0.0,0.08465307414957983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853466926385568,0.0,0.10053655803317756
mentalhealth,KirumiIsFedUp,2020/01/21,"Why are my emotions so intense when it comes to love? It scares me sometimes. Within a few days of developing feelings for someone, I already want to marry them, I get furious when I find out they are with someone else if they are, I can’t stop thinking about them, and I just want them all to myself. I developed a crush on a guy just after seeing one photo and that instantly made me swoon. I wanted to marry them, find out what kind of women they like, if they are single, and then try to get them to notice me. Then when I find out more about them such as their interests, hobbies, and personality I start to get obsessed. It sounds like I’ve never been loved before by my parents or was abused in the past but I was not. I was pampered and loved to death when I was younger. I’ve been rejected but I’ve never had a serious relationship until  this year and we are still together. Right now it’s a pretty serious relationship and we love each other very much, even though I feel like we are drifting apart as of late. Even then I still find myself falling in love with other people almost all the time.",5.053051948051948,5.568507136363639,5.771298701298702,81.67409090909094,68.54545454545455,8.467532467532468,27.98701298701299,8.418075326091056,1.8282467532467541,870,27,173,12,14,284,122,220,0.122,0.737,0.142,0.5639,1,1,0,0,1,0,21.0,3,0,11,0,16,16,1,2,7,0,14,5,0,1,4,42,32,24,1,5,8,1,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,3,9,17,0,1,7,0,0,3,4,6,0,1,8,4,35,10,28,24,7,33,0,1,1,5,25,9,0,4,24,133,44,0,0.0,0.12911619532505436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091215717415429,0.0,0.12025535571314162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272872192177388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093871324469072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027911948944454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103367029678867,0.12258091624950825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439524032471672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102009079440504,0.07785094178823906,0.0,0.0,0.3984005067451093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708030201394543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790124652617628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134794977218422,0.0,0.0,0.12292725185253248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971735911432694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4917657811848854,0.10311369383253788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010832006176609,0.0,0.16809470568857693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406745300759915,0.0,0.0,0.07384350251860428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210025666861308,0.0,0.10402787257670924,0.0755487480303496,0.095151764426736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110865584498084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23399426988185504,0.0,0.09306307435884033,0.0,0.0,0.10910183669800086,0.0,0.08683805131404225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846663826771444,0.0,0.1077779262835212,0.0,0.07713225347502937,0.0,0.1740533182740766,0.09110701996828192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982604432075434,0.10706625649954384,0.0,0.06354352956440983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398609241470039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991484073300048,0.1928268043344668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833195181529636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017558797101367
mentalhealth,usernameforapacc,2020/01/21,"(19m) Feeling disconnected from reality in an abnormal way Gonna get straight to the point since I like most people here are looking for a spaghetti of armchair diagnoses and ideas. So basic facts:
 - Diagnosed with DID
 - No hallucinations in my/our life 
 - Not a drug user of any kind. 
 - Not delusional in any known ways and have shown no real set of signs for schizophrenia 

Now to the crux of the post. I/we feel a strong sensation that we are not “in” the world. Like physically speaking I/we don’t feel present wherever we are. The best I can explain is it feels as if there is some coating or barrier over us that prevents us from I guess feeling like we are a physically part of the environment around. Additionally our sight feels as if we’re looking at the world through a monitor. Kinda like the “off” sensation one can have when looking through the camera of an FPS video game(although that’s often because the camera is centered in the model). 

We’re unsure if this is a symptom of dissociation or something else entirely. It does feel comparable to the dissociation experienced as a result of the DID.",5.152952898550727,7.0223448115942055,6.044030797101453,74.77300271739131,69.48309178743962,9.232971014492751,33.22735507246377,9.673873057562805,3.3710485507246384,884,42,159,21,16,291,123,207,0.038,0.8320000000000001,0.13,0.9531,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,6,0,0,2,7,7,0,0,22,0,15,5,0,1,1,37,29,12,0,3,8,0,7,4,0,1,5,1,0,0,6,8,0,2,10,1,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,13,9,7,30,26,4,21,0,0,4,0,8,14,0,10,7,105,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842717148521929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061222217061693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259166371177888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142185326904991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750330594123182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856565284806478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571219933423059,0.0,0.11318206630304944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4795443543164396,0.096791993846942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078640495382643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925428867002405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15294841675626442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14108893987594587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956985282922113,0.2647685655954253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34132506051875555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180954882805488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671929970519668,0.0,0.0939296787749647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12807907969093738,0.0,0.1297591662932717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542139538754674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120763089825739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043045700606197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408229485746674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32594853961423725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21508666834003654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,acatcalledcat,2020/01/21,"Looking to try new medication for depression I’ve had chronic depression and anxiety for several years and have tried a variety of meds including fluoxetine, propranolol, quetiapine, buspirone and I’m currently on pregabalin. My depression has flared up a lot recently and I can’t seem to pull myself from this funk. 

My mood is very up and down, one doctor suggested I may have cyclothymic disorder, which I’m starting to wonder about. Part of the reason I’ve been reluctant to go back on anti-depressants, besides not wanting to be reliant on meds, is because when I feel good I don’t feel like I need them, but then the downs come and they’re getting worse. But I always leave it to see if it will pass which it does and it’s a nasty cycle which is leaving me drained. I make an effort in my social life but I often feel empty and numb, then I feel incredibly depressed, then I feel normal, then happy, and repeat.

Anyone have any suggestions for the right medication? I was considering sertraline but I’m unsure. I’m trying to get an appointment with my psychiatrist soon.

Tl;dr - chronic depression is getting the best of me, excessive mood swings, want to try a new medication.",5.719409090909092,7.3574797136363665,6.72159090909091,71.36238636363636,67.77272727272727,10.590909090909092,33.29545454545455,10.686352973137794,4.043590909090908,947,43,160,28,16,316,135,220,0.185,0.741,0.07400000000000001,-0.9746,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,2,5,12,0,0,10,0,16,8,0,2,0,33,39,19,0,5,6,0,5,1,0,2,8,0,0,0,8,11,0,0,8,0,0,4,3,6,0,1,3,7,19,4,25,33,3,27,0,5,2,0,4,9,0,6,15,105,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603222646940932,0.0,0.0,0.07031157647475485,0.0,0.07909625180278394,0.0,0.0,0.07229560290422295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950372931682005,0.0,0.06302812218257127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850579530653694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906491640356208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5343194472651353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849866861307196,0.10582830716356498,0.09048092892816244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613959776626799,0.07386481080910476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205754841787226,0.0,0.058761285634080736,0.08672211854222614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006500927329116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189589796614745,0.0,0.0,0.07303035515718198,0.05051316547118016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682505655544168,0.0,0.0,0.0879020200946469,0.0,0.0,0.06901640676736172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22969521341448615,0.31247622524936824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766654618684886,0.0,0.1997174541083033,0.0,0.0,0.10130432722153268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006256080825418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196580299715647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10630641998544332,0.10208926253977968,0.0,0.0,0.0882980503887476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082391761538228,0.09412616291297893,0.0,0.11680597437409375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539732859117246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731829208400618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807913992142547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531101290642581,0.1219691125452885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212655942980584,0.0,0.0,0.1053674854540723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658245115384956
mentalhealth,SilverSwan99,2020/01/21,"My Mental Health Is Killing Me. My brain and I (13F) are the same person but different people. Sometimes it can be a help, otherwise it makes me want to kill myself. The worst experience I've ever had is when I was in the bathroom and my brain was telling me how worthless I am and how I should kill myself because of how ugly and fat I am and how everything would be so much better without me. I was crying and wailing and begging it to stop. I don't know how to tell anyone and it's taking me over.

Please help. I want this to stop before I really do end my life.",2.6882674199623366,3.86740718644068,4.323333333333334,87.41874764595106,74.59322033898306,6.9393596986817325,24.128060263653484,7.3871296695380915,0.9610760828625232,440,13,94,5,9,148,71,118,0.242,0.617,0.141,-0.9628,1,0,0,0,0,3,11.0,0,0,0,1,8,6,3,0,4,0,16,5,3,6,1,25,21,16,3,4,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,5,8,1,2,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,0,20,1,8,13,3,7,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,73,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682748639457422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313340776553504,0.0,0.13000471960145135,0.0,0.0,0.13512169441721886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34110651952653104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782190434567332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15962281864342806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531793273612475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819846132527844,0.0,0.0,0.13730901587774222,0.14944837733628788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16239823600099446,0.0,0.0,0.2048107301492544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5070860516621067,0.0,0.08396401670724171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791319193064047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198198726844106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539665335992016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231104528927813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591857194162453,0.13340180040782482,0.0,0.16770680919853714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978749249901783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110355017656035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554622201024669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148717162808385,0.0,0.2670733033155558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802274714860841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14727468596913287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853068913068092,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bluerey8,2020/01/21,"New ADD meds.. So I got a new therapist last week and she gave me new meds for my ADD. Anyways, has anybody else experienced on and off headaches from Vyvanse?",2.576666666666668,4.855314838709682,3.2851612903225837,89.91440860215056,78.03225806451613,6.713978494623658,29.68817204301075,7.793537801064563,1.8688623655913983,124,6,26,2,3,39,26,31,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,0,4,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007049992498052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19215652859111892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958425997624424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5337456680727313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6961289553069452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789584304362147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927207342235189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tubudesu,2020/01/21,"Wanting to Tell Team Lead About Anxiety Attacks I’ve started a job toward the beginning of December in a call centre and had been coping pretty well. However, once the holiday break came round I experienced crippling levels of stress. I don’t know why this has started happening, I have zero history of mental health issues, but I’ve been having near-daily episodes of hyperventilation and uncontrollable crying over the last half month. I’ve never been someone to collapse under a large workload, so I’ve no idea why this is starting now and I’m just very confused.

Anyway, this has resulted in me taking two sick days and going home sick partway through work once over the span of three weeks. I’m worried about the effect this is having on my team and want to speak to my Team Lead about it so we can discuss solutions going forward. 

I need some advice on how to do this. I don’t want to seem like I’m taking liberties with the sick leave. I want him to know that I want to be able to put in the work, I just need help figuring out how. So, any tips on coming out to my boss about my issues? Any help would be greatly appreciated.",4.742494343891406,6.1086476923076924,5.601399886877829,79.504905260181,69.81447963800906,8.239932126696834,28.29213800904977,8.660442795831766,2.140015610859728,904,32,168,15,16,296,129,221,0.165,0.7020000000000001,0.133,-0.8983,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,8,14,7,1,3,10,0,18,4,0,7,1,37,42,11,0,8,3,0,1,1,0,1,4,1,1,0,7,11,0,0,6,4,0,8,4,4,1,4,5,3,15,3,33,34,1,33,0,0,1,0,11,15,0,3,12,106,22,9,0.12163483916824185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886015708647985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654317233415348,0.0,0.09305031903450968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383771893293952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12420277038107408,0.1391178521175814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477764365873138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361015929428138,0.07844440866433659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13825576435056092,0.0,0.0,0.1341028395916908,0.0,0.0,0.10756128657125104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929214613433493,0.0,0.0,0.1630585374842069,0.0,0.1220096611843324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373109279774361,0.0,0.25391034073663143,0.12070380931090112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369465316202028,0.09914862830784127,0.0,0.12879373199485675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05942463840455784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225793090620951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097087768160035,0.0,0.0,0.18038138402760104,0.09381228651652768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590742679649418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12374635994812715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222766091320906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073178929369508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306080450727896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258281295643089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933229730599753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18290852282401746,0.0,0.10631421070559824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11881956363397995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036148094467218,0.3587168979572193,0.0,0.09756813108036756,0.0,0.10936432816918557,0.0,0.2195130465207235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17710322315684554,0.12352608347094805,0.0,0.0864058998710931,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Weatheronthe8s,2020/01/21,I feel like I have lost my identity. I am lost and don’t feel like I know myself anymore. Is there anything I can do to rediscover myself? I am an 18 year old male who is still a senior in high school. I have aspergers and ADHD but nothing else diagnosed. I have come to the realization that I feel like I have lost my identity. Almost everything feels numb to me and I can’t get myself to do much of anything. My hobbies I struggle to do. I struggle to figure out who I want to be. I am a mess. I feel like I have been trying to please everyone my whole life and I wonder if it has taken a toll on me. Part of me wants to put on a new persona but I am not sure if people will like me for it so it makes me wonder if that’s who I want to be. I don’t know why I’m such a mess. But I feel like I only do things to please others and struggle to give myself an identity so I can love myself. Is there any explanation behind this and what can I do?,0.20971153846153712,1.8772067019230791,3.0458076923076938,91.74919230769231,82.94230769230771,6.083076923076924,19.534615384615385,7.1686216300943375,0.2748896153846161,726,19,172,10,20,257,97,208,0.127,0.722,0.151,0.7294,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,6,17,0,3,8,0,28,4,0,1,1,32,51,14,0,6,7,0,6,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,12,8,0,0,11,0,0,2,4,9,0,0,5,6,39,8,20,43,3,12,0,3,0,1,6,5,0,6,11,129,51,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495381674582605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411267062202516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070434290539222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311201981858674,0.0,0.0,0.17111975246329164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956244058186583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552911909788007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685504048248037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934944525957147,0.09344308832497628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154273893213851,0.3713871295407528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05432093854349605,0.09973915906306886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985184299578908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114280289304242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343830891617023,0.3047720177908521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34049228155805744,0.0,0.09383854719569304,0.0,0.06940193827014586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643118594762002,0.0,0.0,0.100416546374376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976368070884553,0.0,0.1091008425018246,0.0,0.0,0.07907518711111337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259125347062765,0.0,0.07208090750580448,0.0,0.0,0.2282594785850348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452030755353116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522494327634714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303195924935837,0.0,0.0,0.32608148599942843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979921266817622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690741986137714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058998094736847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18397566353169706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381831609990746,0.11608072540960505,0.0,0.0,0.2255058158046932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695438637410699
mentalhealth,CurtD34,2020/01/21,Ask Dr. Ross - How Does Cannabis Help with Mental Health Issues? Dr. Michelle Ross talks about how medical marijuana effects mental health patients and whether it is doing more harm or more good in this interview...,7.335000000000001,10.152869166666667,5.151111111111113,79.50500000000002,65.66666666666666,8.133333333333335,34.22222222222222,8.841846274778883,3.1736222222222232,174,8,27,3,3,49,30,36,0.08900000000000001,0.773,0.138,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,3,0,7,3,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,14,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24874805779612524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23284762971175346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231745405948625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5656593211795172,0.0,0.0,0.1783472244516854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777174702327129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680467189881852,0.5362903380277751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21386431658628632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,feroniawafflez,2020/01/21,"I will probably kill myself sometime this week. Sorry if that sounds like a clickbait-y title. I honestly wish it was. But unfortunately it's true.  You may ask me why?
1. I have undiagnosed gender dysphoria
2. It feels like i have no friends
3. My family are against me
4. I've tried multiple times to end my life already 
5. I just dong know how to think happy anymore.
6. Exams coming up in 2 weeks, not fun
(I'm a girl and 15)... 
If i die. Then at least i tried on here...",-1.3417286914765896,0.5461643469387809,1.82966386554622,92.21239495798322,104.51020408163264,5.163025210084034,18.009603841536613,6.794906146795322,0.3897771908763508,358,12,80,7,17,126,79,98,0.159,0.654,0.187,0.4763,0,0,0,0,0,2,23.0,0,1,0,0,3,8,1,0,2,0,6,1,0,1,1,14,13,6,2,3,5,0,1,2,1,2,1,1,0,1,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,2,13,7,7,10,1,10,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,3,7,44,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314032139051063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079607041458245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19603615144163408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18063333684271404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21762989620973497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572718170207228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976814137302595,0.0,0.10602789423509754,0.14980586958896808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16200953368403492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22322380907622685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319960145003804,0.0,0.11524267236502495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811350277450772,0.20489238640732652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22608625359051504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073933288221021,0.23473594529003794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134363837471375,0.0,0.0,0.12227461202770935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847377477287844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364087313121296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892167674752054,0.0,0.24113845002865225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RegularStatus6,2020/01/21,"How can I take control of my life? I'm 29M.

I was living on my own three years ago and working at an insurance company when I got laid off. I freaked out and became extremely depressed. I spend several months working jobs at different grocery stores and Target, and most of them I quit just by not showing up one day.

I'm extremely stressed about building a career for the long term, and it feels like so big a task when I don't even have a clear idea of what I want. I get overwhelmed and stop trying. And then I end up frantically trying to get work in fields that I know play only to my weaknesses because it is what I'm familiar with.

My dad nagged and guilt tripped me for months to move back in with him and work as a merchandiser at a company he's been with for 35 years. In doing so I lost the unemployment benefits and mental health counseling I was receiving. I really hate living with him for a number of reasons and hated that job even more. I want to be independent and be out of that shitty small town forever. 

My dad is an alcoholic and impossible to get through to. I could get another job but I would still be in the same place. I could get my own place but I would still be in the same place with less money than I'm giving my dad as rent. I'm stuck and can't do anything. I have no support network or friends. I've put all my friendships on hold until I'm independent again. My mom is also unstable and controlling. She demands that I live within an hour of her and cusses me out about how I'm lazy and being enabled for living with my dad.

I know I need to do something for myself and fast. All of my ""dream careers"" require grad school, which I don't have the money or references to get into. I think about killing myself all the time because life seems too impossible. I'm getting old and all the doors are closing. Nobody's going to want to hire me, much less be my friend or marry me. I'm so alone and going to die alone.",3.5620187142609616,4.676333216080405,4.823720325766768,84.92309045226132,72.36683417085428,8.102720499046958,27.040720845607343,8.53829466247534,1.7735452088026342,1532,53,321,26,29,508,202,398,0.142,0.78,0.079,-0.9764,7,2,2,0,0,1,32.0,0,0,1,10,19,18,4,4,16,0,27,5,0,7,5,71,62,37,2,8,7,5,1,1,2,2,5,0,2,0,9,31,1,5,8,3,5,6,5,12,0,2,6,1,48,6,57,46,14,53,0,3,0,0,15,25,0,5,23,216,57,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788646774422969,0.09390029650411692,0.0,0.1820019897105399,0.0,0.07026510961034425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213345909855672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230489478180371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06756228147250233,0.0,0.1071226159621482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19709473751588524,0.14030510902907053,0.0,0.0,0.05666525357481503,0.0,0.07567745815734446,0.0,0.09118935012030176,0.09179957176796937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778217574609567,0.0,0.0,0.1160671831400776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044426868451036564,0.06277032765231641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576759762549054,0.0,0.3213385693361386,0.08428751558915218,0.09987069924419144,0.0,0.07027316791835546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17349576103735578,0.0,0.09339572278865224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08652871126630525,0.0,0.0,0.09918818542859344,0.0,0.0,0.2615755059604863,0.0,0.09720891367058176,0.0,0.09657592621342624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241224142204476,0.04292609583169504,0.0,0.310343414447492,0.07775720768289178,0.0,0.0,0.09591434551018266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854662491945224,0.0,0.0,0.10290569504503706,0.14026501303215,0.09338592632495127,0.06459042604303257,0.06515032135583597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219888205942564,0.0,0.059539175013393085,0.06682481714256815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275398715303908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832796601714372,0.0,0.093454579139817,0.0,0.0,0.05628816905552377,0.09033921214902127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892343919968751,0.0,0.07998842780457953,0.0,0.09926173509275656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764228918243262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033720808098432,0.0734585525039741,0.1006483456557093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997074524570565,0.0,0.0,0.0660630757710706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0562999442267641,0.0,0.0,0.05123442413570423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930828724507207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15547405606404766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558652482687965,0.0,0.0,0.1248326632814952,0.0,0.0,0.113163554581428
mentalhealth,anonymousperson2332,2020/01/21,"i feel like unmotivated psychopath So here it goes i will try to explain it as much as i can because its hard to think right now,and sorry on my english if i get anywhere wrong.

At this time as i am writing this,i dont feel any single emotion,my thoughts are not functioning properly its like a big fog in my mind,i can easily stare at something and not think of anything,i feel like my mind functioning dropped from 100 to 10%,i feel like i am going insane,i just want it to disappear,on the other hand i have actually small will to go out and do something but its too late for that this condition doesnt allow me to enjoy it actually ,i am 17  years old male,i didnt ever go to a therapist , i got this state from one bad weed trip , i am idiot i shouldn't have abused the weed and actually listened to my emotions and do something with my life , one day i was going out with my 2 friends this one friend doesnt smoke weed,and this other is my buddy to smoke but that day he didnt feel like smoking and i smoked a whole joint before that joint i was myself,i know where i was and what is happening in my life whats wrong why i am sad...what i want what i dont want to do but actually didnt do anything to change this state of my mind,when i smoked this joint idk i didnt actually get high this weird feeling got over my body ,that didnt disappear since that night in october,like some fucking strange feeling ,that feeling disconected me for my life,my thoughts,my emotions,so i am walking with two of my friends to go to this cafe,and as i am walking ,this feeling is starting to kick in,but i am still mentally ok,like i feel everything know my life etc,two of my friends are talking about someting,and i am just walking, feeling so weird,wondering how the fuck didnt i get high when i smoked a whole joint by myself and my buddy didnt helped me out,so we are quting this yard in school where i smoked a joint and making left to cafe,as i am walking, at this one slight moment ,this wave of nothingness from top of my forehead started going up and up to back of my head,i could feel the wave shut downed my emotions,my thoughts got so much lowered , ITS LIKE THIS WAVE TAKED AWAY MY LIFE I DONT KNOW HOW TO EXPLAIN IT ,then we sat down in this caffe ordered drinks they start talking about sports which i am not interested in and i am just sitting there completely silent and numb,when i realised what happened to me i got the most intense anxiety and panic attack that i never ever got,i didnt ever got single anxiety attack,maybe on some of the trips on the weed but i think that was not anxiety just paranoia,i actually got anxiety attack i didnt want to be around people i rushed from cafe and go on a walk alone ,when i come back to cafe everything was so strange but i was thinking when i come back home and take a good sleep everything will comeback which never did,i recently talked about this with my friends and my mother, friends hardly understanded me but i know they cant because they just cant feel this,i wouldnt wish this to anyone not a single person,mother also didnt understanded me but we talked and i just said to her that she need to get me a good therapist and thats it,i dont think that therapist will also understand me because this is fucking serbia but no one knows maybe i can get a good person to talk to , can someone explain what actually happened to me???this is maybe depersonalization?? i feel ok in my body but i just dont have actually touch with my mind its so strange help me guys ,my mind doesnt want to do anything i just want to sleep and do nothing ,i never had social anxiety, i think ignoring my emotions shut downed me , help :(((",8.53312665562914,5.623478320529802,8.412357201986755,76.77317156456955,63.145695364238435,11.609685430463578,37.50103476821192,9.595489714322824,3.239146523178808,2912,105,620,41,32,947,252,755,0.106,0.764,0.13,0.9257,1,1,11,0,1,0,67.0,3,0,3,1,36,30,6,1,17,1,68,14,6,4,6,116,144,45,0,12,23,1,18,6,6,6,4,2,2,2,48,31,1,1,33,3,0,18,32,12,0,6,27,21,93,18,79,109,10,84,0,0,1,3,33,35,3,4,32,392,141,1,0.0,0.050555978597327605,0.333111569108954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04419238255975296,0.0,0.068245025440477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029016492739717226,0.0,0.16320895727593113,0.0,0.0,0.029835269552476337,0.0,0.07022616788359454,0.03798459977150659,0.0,0.14562699203330273,0.04008908144164287,0.09842985324032286,0.035626967231160905,0.0780321737074933,0.0,0.03630831336868754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479163782911716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045138314720911996,0.07351140821356449,0.04473780360450326,0.0,0.0,0.03406785312161597,0.0,0.0,0.05503615796302727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500396951624124,0.04179953356423928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599412626354567,0.0,0.0,0.0475873937161439,0.0,0.11579009722688492,0.0,0.0,0.11504487203508032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020473388779507,0.12193142887828827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977965281487302,0.11834085564139182,0.11146437786509507,0.0,0.1697490729727788,0.10736660373232693,0.23888498226761035,0.0,0.0,0.04224917793053814,0.11319659474595165,0.0,0.0764463745465703,0.0,0.043790869347665566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580071778539275,0.0901646228152352,0.04280064761970211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11724927524347407,0.0,0.048132672265002834,0.0,0.04636016838956032,0.0,0.15069245182962093,0.12507598088183056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028481996369481982,0.0,0.12860072236701864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043000478500689464,0.0,0.21541844553084602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273348597849587,0.031638642300856244,0.09872726254504276,0.0,0.0,0.040042117209400784,0.0,0.04094221087450222,0.0,0.04477410685489582,0.0,0.1445686392587596,0.0,0.0,0.05006306697312362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029581423762229667,0.07451413130235833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042130648945870215,0.0,0.0,0.0364392304438828,0.04058814335104048,0.0,0.0,0.04318346903670084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03529637099753141,0.0,0.08539995252698777,0.04349583629303783,0.03615344173814894,0.09854641453717218,0.0,0.04776463248209363,0.0906043555426208,0.0,0.03407564717696797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06416379781764613,0.17147927708809407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14862655430686533,0.0,0.1640440531876996,0.0,0.06774909545266676,0.024880730977003832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02896955951343527,0.0,0.08336314065722195,0.13326030455928484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100426043970833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038502281134386265,0.0952771891417164,0.049067429484175765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330405870378314,0.0,0.027477540788634246
mentalhealth,artkraft,2020/01/21,"Can somebody send me nice messages? Its common this part of the day being particularly depressed and exhausted, so I ask if somebody would like to talk to me about anything or just send me kind messages it would be helpful as hell.",9.693488372093023,8.256817534883723,8.711279069767446,70.9008720930233,59.69767441860465,10.460465116279073,42.43023255813954,8.841846274778883,3.900962790697674,186,9,32,2,2,58,36,43,0.191,0.609,0.2,-0.1171,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,6,6,5,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,3,5,2,1,4,1,1,0,0,7,0,1,2,3,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853202315062849,0.0,0.3241355032722331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22360510055534089,0.0,0.29862860524754736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23239846721630744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3610545306116591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16938941184162346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37546293801136255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27867963473903323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4925985231636874,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clareonline,2020/01/21,"Zine about seasonal depression ❄️Proceeds go towards a good cause Hello to my fellow mental health warriors,

This winter, I put together an arts magazine called Saving Daylight--a collection of writing and visual art that reflects on seasonal sadness and the ways that art can help get us through the winter. It features work from artists around the world who've struggled with seasonal depression and turn to poetry, photography, fiction, and other creative outlets to cope and work through hard times in their mental health (it also features some fun odds and ends, like cross stitch patterns and playlists to put you in a good mood). [You can buy a copy on Etsy here](https://www.etsy.com/listing/763408965/saving-daylight-issue-1).

Normally I wouldn't use this subreddit to self-promote, but I want to get the word out because I'm donating $5 from every sale to fund research grants at the [Brain and Behavior Research Foundation](https://www.bbrfoundation.org/), so every order will help make a difference in the advancement of mental health treatment research.

The hope is that this zine brings people comfort and makes it just a little bit easier to get through the cold. Hope you enjoy. Stay warm!

[https://www.etsy.com/listing/763408965/saving-daylight-issue-1](https://www.etsy.com/listing/763408965/saving-daylight-issue-1)",14.543793103448277,14.979498280788182,10.17232019704434,58.28862807881775,48.950738916256164,12.06088669950739,43.452709359605905,11.20814326018867,5.173297931034481,1113,47,140,20,10,307,134,203,0.045,0.768,0.188,0.9827,0,0,0,0,0,0,72.0,1,3,1,3,5,15,0,1,14,0,5,4,1,4,0,28,18,12,0,5,2,0,2,1,1,2,3,0,0,0,10,12,0,0,1,4,4,6,1,4,0,0,0,3,9,10,26,16,2,27,0,3,0,0,11,11,0,3,8,78,19,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987623584245543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118052402131992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613311724145674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634992007445118,0.0,0.0,0.13942098365130862,0.1275288854603858,0.0,0.0,0.12829867792746766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151389132044494,0.0,0.0,0.13048575218879815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061740663250344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104541061435186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19575303699865967,0.0,0.07097910731783266,0.2095072799179327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187886712963868,0.0,0.0,0.3982636597727347,0.0,0.0,0.16742519902221215,0.0,0.0,0.2480922413944979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061016013421987925,0.12517478050162725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673300761787854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775858449186866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236782493825528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658451622408582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25110228431534115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13028978773758654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331184526027249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13056442957342973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282563788211409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584683442991174,0.0,0.0,0.15022992191882228,0.10786674900388626,0.0,0.0,0.07366464701541309,0.09913360381594397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18184599740680266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Easy-Cloud,2020/01/21,"I’m not sure how to seek help or wheat to look for Who do I go to for help for depression? Also what do I need to look for to make I get good help?

I went to my Primary who made me feel like shit telling me I’d get over it and asking if I want anti-depressants. Idk what I need, that’s why I brought it up because this has been ongoing for over 20 years. I opened up to my best friend a while back that I had considered suicide a few times and they quickly shut me out of their life. Now I’m afraid to open up with others. I need help but I don’t know what the first step is or who to look for. I just want to feel ok. Not good, but at least ok. Right now I just try to fill every second of my day so that I don’t have a spare second to think. I’m so tired. Any advice would mean a lot. Everyone looks at me as a strong man and expects me to have everything figured out but I feel like I’m drowning. I’m so tired and hate that no one believes me when I say I’m depressed. They just tell me that’s the way it is, and that we all get sad. I can’t believe that. There has to be more than me feeling depressed almost constantly.",1.0372619047619054,2.033821059523813,2.8097142857142856,97.36028571428574,78.48412698412699,6.309841269841268,20.933333333333334,6.742157984588678,0.02017238095238083,865,21,224,8,20,288,133,252,0.156,0.7040000000000001,0.14,-0.9055,0,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,1,0,3,3,14,17,2,1,7,2,15,4,1,3,2,44,47,19,2,8,11,0,4,2,1,1,3,1,0,1,18,11,0,0,8,0,0,5,6,7,0,4,5,9,32,10,34,40,6,30,0,4,4,0,17,13,1,5,13,145,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385611543262464,0.0,0.0,0.1064246104514281,0.0,0.0,0.08499251090426163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227441296024834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935795979356646,0.0,0.0,0.08172317636181531,0.0,0.06478763183993917,0.0,0.0,0.2394835516520121,0.11153487166342432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485150886525823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854215711123289,0.0,0.3661570997790343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954594033491907,0.10155561227221653,0.09551809798893188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21495454129120348,0.1518536806400476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040217458812892,0.0,0.0,0.08211208297845686,0.0,0.16658158961752356,0.0,0.060401681158685286,0.17828615208361576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493003172971484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849504275669687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058409006314105276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506908978436719,0.1038466086023329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35699555079883666,0.0,0.0,0.09035591603669428,0.0,0.100565218436621,0.07094308695421939,0.0,0.0,0.11577066726259345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23641702527580702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201844570682311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076300201678007,0.0,0.08451855265271843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909544889724164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11625366273330745,0.0,0.10016815289730273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18578775612984494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681002797852054,0.0,0.0,0.061973038627215635,0.2443076966712049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215751146535415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125374034411791,0.08436054715353823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098523127056653,0.09590165812180547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549864757912897,0.0,0.0,0.06844118439481575
mentalhealth,toecrosserfeen,2020/01/21,"Trying to figure out how to help I met someone that needed help. He was spiraling out of control very similar to how I had spiraled. In the short time, he got through many guards that I had that most people many years to break down with me trying to help. It was bringing out old toxic behaviors out of me. Every time I tried to put boundaries, he would break through to the point that I had to block him on every messaging platform for the safety of my own mental health. The guy needs help and it cannot come from me because all he sees me as an anomaly to be a specimen to help him figure out his own life. What should I do? I’m tempted to reach out to one of his friends to see if they can be there for him.",5.514324324324324,4.689053540540542,5.816891891891893,86.30885135135134,67.64864864864866,8.751351351351351,29.986486486486484,7.645422480735847,1.6440783783783783,556,17,123,5,8,178,87,148,0.019,0.847,0.134,0.9393,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,6,0,12,2,0,3,1,23,21,5,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,7,9,0,3,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,7,2,17,1,33,10,4,21,0,0,2,0,19,12,0,2,4,85,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414396276597273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330346499831157,0.0,0.0,0.17321533332066105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602413279609249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931840481001847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351816550653125,0.0,0.0,0.1529178867512537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16416035717094266,0.0,0.0,0.5175826326946258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908411671837336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131517554140552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15563716559003818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22902761934351015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205668694151282,0.0,0.10465117613554599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706785387044962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599381544851991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525283189220065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461341592252844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085480428688406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18010806307688176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145597645610408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742751242572906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970831414444687,0.0,0.0,0.09945299947439254
mentalhealth,Need_more_memez,2020/01/21,"I’m having a tough time. I’m still in school, my life is in a fucked up spot, don’t know what to make of it, and what the future brings about, and i’m scared of that.
My social life is twisted and fucked up.

I feel like shit, I feel alone, I feel like no one could understand my mind, I have active suicidal thoughts as that that would ease my mind.",1.6504000000000012,2.842881173333332,2.501000000000001,99.3955,77.26666666666667,6.066666666666666,17.833333333333332,6.42735559955562,-0.5420666666666669,268,4,68,2,6,84,48,75,0.287,0.598,0.115,-0.946,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,3,1,3,0,7,5,1,1,0,14,20,4,1,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,1,3,8,2,9,17,0,8,0,0,0,2,1,4,3,0,5,39,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20226806280776294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559281997437339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962430234690809,0.2790394236070779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36109655458128737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732973601070436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758870967874781,0.19082380937892632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036179307063508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39438716943282537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323378234522012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195525660495496,0.19765027639236926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004688398077158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19907997798717306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15596387305180534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136224482975007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15504344301487386,0.11387883984655198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20331033005468652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387328842791193,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ComfortablyAnxious,2020/01/21,"Being listening whistles that are not there Hey! I'm a 17 yo who has been starting to hear whistles that are not there. For the past month I have heard 2 times and I just listened again. I was feeding my sheep, the place we keep them is inside the property, a few meters behind the house, it was night, no people were outside and I heard someone whistling, it lasted 5-10 seconds, the same as the lasts one. The only mental illness I say I would have is Anxiety and Social Anxiety.",3.198763157894738,5.0413600736842135,4.0707236842105265,87.02819078947371,74.57894736842105,6.434210526315789,26.61184210526316,7.1686216300943375,1.3238684210526308,377,14,73,4,8,121,69,95,0.09699999999999999,0.903,0.0,-0.7644,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,9,0,13,2,0,0,0,10,21,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,5,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,6,6,9,0,4,13,2,10,0,0,0,0,11,2,0,0,8,54,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35883419082061785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26433572507637265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706195814660424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20846369765815373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38235137911374173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23635409117906586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18720199504832086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22009332342108265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589256237902119,0.1783729073615905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22388827692263,0.1625956448134063,0.0,0.24503705675493576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18651004711847824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390768478762289,0.1987190413445862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600365746160814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675807253740868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666055070207337,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AliceInTheMirror,2020/01/21,"Severe anxiety. Knowing I am too late in life and having suicide thoughts. I have missed too much time in my life. I never wanted kids, I had relationships without feelings, had a shitty life without any wishes for the future or perspectives. I have a history of drug and alkohol abuse, clinical depression, anxiety, I needed stuff in order to survive the empty days. I am Asperger btw. Now, in the last few years, I achieved academic merits, quit drugs and alkohol, met a guy I fell heavily in love with, found a job in my field. 
I am 35. My time is slipping away. I now discovered, that I could have a normal life, a loving relationship and a great job. But I am too late. I am anxious, that he will leave me. That he is my last chance. All my friends are already further in life. So, I am becoming more and more hopeless. I have a history of suicide, few light attempts and one real one (was also hospitalized...). I am in therapy. But I see no possibilities for me. I wasted so much time. I am so deeply sorry for all people that knew and liked me.",2.196929392446634,4.599917330049261,4.165221674876847,82.41742200328406,80.13300492610838,7.216420361247947,26.90804597701149,8.269060116576782,2.1333356321839085,810,35,153,17,21,275,112,203,0.193,0.6890000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.9127,2,0,2,0,1,3,40.0,0,0,0,4,9,9,0,0,11,0,21,10,0,0,3,27,34,14,2,5,5,0,1,1,1,1,8,0,0,2,5,8,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,3,0,2,7,3,28,6,18,25,8,25,0,3,1,2,10,10,0,1,14,114,33,4,0.0,0.1285886197585082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976398600339415,0.08679026566443608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380315553480836,0.0,0.1660481322337349,0.1226064031891149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196617280472887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11986128919118842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08665123952868649,0.0,0.0,0.06999195531001944,0.0,0.09347550633178314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25171739291367057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487531061841213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899598547968825,0.08384891115863198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11965314182954084,0.0,0.10746035635648243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153957374626389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059644468921587535,0.17693055450941605,0.24484992926919666,0.11491609520020428,0.0,0.0,0.3832847256925757,0.05302158186089823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959025601330074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15956198650343054,0.08047256639821647,0.08370393093906657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063349649252188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470835481652193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752400518714857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223496664540776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11543350314376664,0.0,0.12352928318530206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23303815698532265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648322646806197,0.0,0.0,0.1226064031891149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148885917262205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12423925807559305,0.2374253017292986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241118888012094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615956921271371,0.18985166207927787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401296795595607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248025101585436,0.2092353552081769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988884682681938
mentalhealth,throwaway765432105,2020/01/21,"Negative thoughts to the point of suicide Lately I've been having really negative thoughts to the point of considering suicide. 

I don't have a clue why. 

Things seem to be looking up. I got out of my fucking crazy relationship with my abusive ex, I started recording my debut album with my band. I met a fucking fantastic girl who makes me feel things I've never felt before, even when I had been in happy relationships.

But something's sorely missing. I keep feeling so fucking low and angry. The last half hour of college today was really stressful and it put me in such a bad mood. Little things seem to be setting me off and I'm getting so tired of it all. I've been barely sleeping at night, waking up in the middle of the night, unable to sleep anymore.

I feel like I'm making a bigger deal out of it than i should. I feel like i should just get over it. On the surface things seem like they're going well for me. But everything's moving too fucking slow and too fast at the same time. I hate where i live, but i know i wouldn't really be any happier anywhere else and i'm too young and don't have the money to go anywhere else. 

I should be happy. I fucking should be. I have so many reasons to be happy and yet i'm just fucking not. The closest I get to happiness is when I'm around my girlfriend, but we only see each other once or twice every week or so. 

I don't know what to do or who to tell or how to act and its fucking draining me. 

I wouldn't kill myself, but the thought is so tempting sometimes. I know theres no good that could come from it but fuck me i don't want to be here. I'm safe and will remain so but i just want these feelings to go away. I want to feel like me again. 

Not the fucking shell I am now.",1.863339681440444,3.613726313019392,3.453454813019391,90.3961655990305,78.11357340720221,5.842139889196678,23.746623961218837,6.6274283507984215,0.6533856648199445,1353,45,289,12,32,448,180,361,0.11199999999999999,0.7559999999999999,0.132,0.9390000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,3,32.0,1,0,0,0,25,27,11,1,15,0,32,14,3,4,2,68,83,29,3,10,16,1,7,4,1,7,2,0,0,1,16,17,0,2,17,1,1,7,12,15,1,2,11,9,39,11,40,57,3,49,0,2,2,9,12,23,9,7,22,197,55,1,0.0,0.08330666844634517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047813679157447504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972930983149381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062591419393458,0.0,0.0,0.06605920622321823,0.0,0.058706487921331874,0.0,0.0,0.059829217187997275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06056643230910645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05613736344194252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248723239207035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747111614892658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04643954656182205,0.0,0.059239787438752876,0.0,0.06319071306029643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133071798809376,0.15068990949108468,0.06750928703710048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5850098859580983,0.11020329814218796,0.0,0.11987755355745044,0.0589732695485916,0.05623388050440845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29938814082737303,0.0,0.06941724831255043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924186504873511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06249537041680205,0.0777883593018867,0.0,0.11592274665768627,0.057312595275635474,0.07931351901531865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740100325773474,0.07046978104149779,0.06208562599471173,0.0,0.05904327004330046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386586093569817,0.07128400232259187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472913456601282,0.0,0.0,0.05422793739828763,0.0,0.0,0.13196363614370124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487858843646733,0.0,0.053474446837091766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293265389179731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706816617684901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13512848216083412,0.07229109788749867,0.0,0.150974732567958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05602851548663833,0.19202463006040146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072293184480966,0.0,0.0,0.054128602987542296,0.0695390686515503,0.0,0.049766267125413564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805406559890008,0.0,0.0,0.1538169624114613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061454640716766235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868451885619486,0.0,0.0,0.1674564983906802,0.04099872782036372,0.08081179317746105,0.06664631137515041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441319708824015,0.0,0.05639899314640358,0.0,0.06321775283154979,0.0,0.0634444601386835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Toodapperbaby,2020/01/21,"Emotional and mental intelligence I feel like I live my life pretty close to the way I want to usually, then other times I feel like it’s falling apart.

I’m a 22 year old in university, I have friends and a loving girlfriend, but sometimes I can’t help but feel alone. 
I don’t know why I feel like this sometimes, it’s not always but does anyone else feel that? 
I feel like I don’t show emotions sometimes and that’s because I’m afraid of feeling vulnerable. I need some advice or help on how to just maybe lift myself out of this problem. 
I feel like my behaviour and overall non mental and emotional well being has had an impact on my relationship and some of my friendships. 

Can anyone else share how they improve their mental health? Or maybe what you’d recommend I do to get myself out of this feeling.",3.711033653846151,5.498378843750004,4.623750000000005,83.83394230769233,73.0625,7.1730769230769225,26.68269230769231,7.882392219407189,1.6014711538461537,645,23,124,9,13,209,92,160,0.059000000000000004,0.636,0.305,0.9889,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,2,0,4,11,0,1,4,0,10,3,0,2,0,33,26,14,0,3,7,0,9,5,2,0,2,0,0,0,9,9,0,0,10,1,0,1,4,2,1,0,1,9,22,9,13,23,2,14,0,0,0,1,10,7,0,4,10,76,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717521199306543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029936605792942,0.0,0.0,0.08274510701805002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13906666477756324,0.20378360125571846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06061994358588404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870238334458948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661448665852737,0.3355822616474291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4525354074877817,0.3552129199771804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682993955035966,0.0,0.05195521777988505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570398035483942,0.0,0.0,0.13331000341669064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05465164518462712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024001122644329,0.24291579180619385,0.0,0.08781059026184146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975180264597978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19980908296148084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30064751644420085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07373622777450684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043494126599534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116997197454716,0.0,0.09515417043727516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067652952596891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950570232667765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05798640880575751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952316288709847,0.0,0.05865445824562637,0.07893376349911972,0.0,0.0,0.08941180993549812,0.0,0.08973245263076192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403846874994394
mentalhealth,kvdlolita,2020/01/21,"Friend said I looked better when I was anorexic: How do I deal with that? So I recently met a friend in an online bipolar chat. I gave him my IG and he saw my transformation picture (where I had a side by side, of me underweight and of me now). He ignored all my recent photos and messaged me to say ""wow you used to be hot. was that a year ago?"". I immediately felt like i'm unattractive now and started crying. 

He kept claiming that he didn't know I had an eating disorder, but I feel like he was still wrong to say ""you USED to be hot"". Since I met him in a bipolar support group, and he claimed to have had a crush on me, he should have been more supportive.

What do you think of this situation? Was he a jerk or was it a misunderstanding?",2.5228431372549025,3.822382673202618,4.113218954248367,88.28198529411767,75.20915032679737,7.191503267973857,25.16830065359477,7.793537801064563,1.1221594771241827,571,19,129,8,12,191,90,153,0.127,0.7390000000000001,0.134,0.2689,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,3,0,1,7,11,1,0,9,0,17,3,0,3,1,19,34,10,0,1,2,0,4,2,2,1,2,3,0,0,6,6,1,2,4,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,17,9,22,8,13,14,2,15,0,0,2,0,25,6,0,1,11,83,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15475188791742006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543990806448092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917645264499518,0.0,0.17998111759672247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000802513025874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786357512184549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827132576654981,0.12471777178662286,0.1676212007016073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697553587813573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594289830924066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705789096173526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466006271487997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34474725401263595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16606260900135078,0.2776611147533158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14441181518048965,0.19623174936870505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356642791108688,0.0,0.13941733734099848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3962155931332253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186182800519508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.301556778247675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908724339120112,0.0,0.11242179946091732
mentalhealth,sinkingflowers,2020/01/21,"I’m depressed, anxious, and lonely and I’ve been missing a lot of school I’ve been really depressed lately with added in anxiety that I haven’t been going to school. I try to go to bed early, I sleep through 6 alarms I have set up to try and force myself to get to school and than I wake up late. And I just don’t care anymore. Like I’ll see that I’m late and just go back to sleep. I rather sleep my days away than go to school. I hate myself a lot. My friends have become distant and I feel really alone. I don’t really have anyone to talk to anymore other than online friends.

I want to go back to therapy but due to being in an abusive household, I’m currently banned from going. I’m supposed to graduate highschool this year and I’m worried that due to me missing so much school, it may impact my chances to graduate. I don’t have bad grades. My grades are pretty average. I still try to keep up with my work but I always fall behind cause I’m super stressed and anxious. And I’m just unhappy with my life and myself. I’ve been feeling depressed to the point I’m getting physically sick. And it just sucks. 

I don’t want to miss school. But I can’t get myself to go. My mom is starting to get mad at me for missing so much school due to my mental health baggage but I’m not getting any treatment.  She kinda just says “take some cbd honey and just go to school.” I’m just stuck and I think my friends have given up trying to help me. Who I considered my best friend (who’s also my ex) barley talks to me anymore. My other friends have gotten into dungeons and dragons and don’t really invite me to things. My friends used to be what kept me going to school but now I feel like I’m an annoyance now. I’ve had many times I’ve broken down during lunch and no one really bats a eye. It’s just a “oh she’s crying again” and get eye rolls. And now I’m nervous about talking about my mental health to people. I honestly just want a hug and someone to talk to irl. Cause being stuck in my head is god awful. And I rather isolate myself than be an annoyance. 

I don’t know that this really is. A rant vent thing? I haven’t been thinking clearly at all so I’m sorry if this is kinda cluster fuck of words.",1.0505429676706302,3.117769837662337,2.8531408308004065,92.11490881458971,82.22510822510823,5.490356452058581,21.08519848945381,6.6644487293756285,0.3563542783457678,1723,52,371,18,47,572,195,462,0.20600000000000002,0.657,0.138,-0.9856,1,3,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,0,3,24,31,6,3,10,1,31,14,7,3,2,67,86,31,0,6,18,2,3,2,7,1,4,1,1,0,17,25,1,3,6,0,0,10,11,18,0,1,11,8,51,13,58,70,7,43,0,8,3,2,19,13,2,7,21,226,68,15,0.0,0.07115450174485335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06219812273841311,0.0,0.04802538608201986,0.0499699718736521,0.0,0.0,0.040838969802611466,0.0,0.045941359884505546,0.13568848543570805,0.17867312631526025,0.041991348962673716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564229730000663,0.0923560689022634,0.050142815396861364,0.0,0.06632523412189811,0.0,0.0,0.06302326188807664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06122934094831645,0.123384576707489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596680673483991,0.03873004248420634,0.0,0.15517399030047133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109574531121342,0.042902789687722716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783867269068888,0.05551921423109367,0.18825529615308784,0.0,0.3071720818819965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059291168501829423,0.061633017021093174,0.1276697829180928,0.0,0.0,0.040253118046939984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05337900346154928,0.0,0.0,0.033004261776214815,0.0,0.2032315311276936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04241811403573062,0.05867897557531007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211200272327127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06088561410794863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210411788040662,0.0,0.0,0.07033484700988699,0.0,0.0,0.08829361158392399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040694334398393935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04163407626761042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05677070593324664,0.0,0.0,0.061096792743569675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23083385757732297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04775757392098416,0.0,0.5470032382628741,0.0478554859689681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802929516850403,0.0,0.05088379662728068,0.0,0.0,0.06722584983191413,0.042506728537473185,0.0,0.047959425646223,0.0,0.06879197492805766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04515334477190255,0.1930774220466334,0.0,0.0,0.06867730305253844,0.0,0.07979479040211153,0.07696071557791978,0.0,0.0,0.03501813365768827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309165642817358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051867616181445114,0.0,0.0,0.10626471102970084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04372023114040585,0.06098803652416945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03867298741384672
mentalhealth,HappinessNowChannel,2020/01/21,"Random Acts Of Kindness 😍 Kindness Is So Simple [https://youtu.be/d\_Jx7fRorFI](https://youtu.be/d_Jx7fRorFI) In this video we’re going to look at Random Acts Of Kindness and how can we find opportunities to help others… A friend asked me why he feels so bad if he upsets someone? I replied - “It's in contradiction to our real nature”! In this video, I will explain how we can change our way of thinking and change our life! 😍#actsofkindness #kindness #love",6.763636363636365,9.839634454545461,5.097402597402599,78.10896103896107,68.0909090909091,6.477922077922077,26.584415584415584,7.447530270364453,1.527576623376624,371,12,58,4,7,107,52,77,0.102,0.693,0.205,0.8439,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,5,0,0,1,4,9,0,1,1,0,4,2,0,2,0,14,11,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,2,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,2,8,7,10,10,0,8,0,0,1,1,12,4,0,3,0,33,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592467646575787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819270450820268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37551155516733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974183546212912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622182311896221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371246031061531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086891301980684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896456912224687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7392939751856868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12536302537742508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904284314281854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018729661793865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20201698143373364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15038260971509154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372533125745052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408794677548471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16015276108176127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheCurseGrows,2020/01/21,Is wanting to kill your friends normal? Every moment I think of killing them in horrible ways and then I hurt myself just for thinking about that.,3.654444444444444,6.608847037037041,3.216296296296296,88.03333333333335,78.62962962962962,5.0814814814814815,27.51851851851852,6.42735559955562,1.3260962962962957,118,5,20,1,3,35,26,27,0.409,0.512,0.079,-0.9313,0,0,0,0,0,2,2.0,0,1,1,0,2,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,4,2,2,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,5,4,0,4,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25485930061470946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337015833619636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238198055783784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6693166098254971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963741487679916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3876443669653529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17841533969001927,0.2401010025313328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hereiamtheoneandonly,2020/01/21,"27(F) Overly sensitive, cry over everything? Am I crazy? Hey everyone, I really didn’t know where to go. I guess I’m curious about all the overly sensitive people out there and how you deal. 
I have always been extremely sensitive. As a kid I thought things had feelings and any time anything was thrown out I would break out in tears. It could be a fork that got bend and I would cry like the world was ending. This was always a common thing  in my childhood. I would also feel people and that is something that until today I deal with. Today as an adult I try to control my emotions, which causes me to bury and not talk about how I feel. I can barely watch the news and if something does happen it will ruin my whole day. I can also be talking to people or sitting in my car and start to think of what other people might be going through.... am I crazy? 


Sorry for the terrible writing.",2.368658823529416,4.609213045714288,3.596134453781513,87.61504201680674,78.54285714285714,6.174789915966388,21.722689075630253,7.285733465282438,0.8197193277310926,693,20,134,9,17,225,111,175,0.125,0.847,0.027999999999999997,-0.9417,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,1,8,3,0,0,8,0,21,0,0,4,1,33,34,16,0,5,3,0,3,1,0,5,0,0,0,2,11,11,0,1,6,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,8,4,20,1,23,17,2,26,0,1,1,0,9,12,0,4,10,101,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207975756897592,0.21639685946148024,0.0,0.0,0.08842735424459082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700663033928128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358039790874374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14584381723274176,0.10382130408939223,0.0,0.2856717598764275,0.08386095935358208,0.26811800680873465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379334038375595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462703760349304,0.11517123506102506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425274359351572,0.1168658774479764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972467909877244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478022619076985,0.0,0.10399980423043384,0.0,0.14324674698268347,0.0,0.11498834441812235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146310403451782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352788262028876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13794517419560365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3605958944171875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833028983276414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20021254316710232,0.0,0.14556204689326435,0.09203850048934002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090322757708038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277718394623146,0.08332032482967695,0.0,0.1032322086111973,0.07582367833712639,0.0,0.2465134283291301,0.0,0.0,0.08828432589641988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451779481282951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771165637058487,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Acerina,2020/01/21,"I've been fine for the last years.... I feel Like I might be decaying Finally moved alone, have an apartment, a job I love,manage to get my degree... even have a great boyfriend
But I feel I might need help soon...
I get really angry sometimes... I cryied once because of it and needed to shower to calm down. I didn't do that since I hallucinated years ago....
Haven't been taking medication in about 6 months as my doctor said I was ready... and everything seemed fine.
Should I go back to my doctor an tell him? I only moved a couple of weeks ago",0.8677205363443896,3.2728008532110096,2.51119266055046,91.99250529287228,86.33944954128441,5.555681016231475,16.64149611856034,7.010146845296331,-0.037037261820747513,419,9,90,6,13,137,75,109,0.08,0.773,0.147,0.7102,2,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,6,0,12,3,0,0,0,11,22,4,0,3,1,0,2,1,0,3,3,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,5,3,16,5,11,13,0,17,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,3,12,53,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723502657095722,0.0,0.0,0.1591043081453925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181245333361786,0.0,0.0936455130325158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997794731401153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144737864468742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146476366141167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380640260499455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535008555039312,0.10974637770790308,0.0,0.16828353694541529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605205394762648,0.0,0.08730596040469253,0.0,0.0,0.16936693031998695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296845331632268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524444502678754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252210532831769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505112212835485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864832441601016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15475629719264514,0.0,0.3259337377085834,0.0,0.0,0.12261826308040795,0.32654814866757514,0.0,0.22781502161061226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636006128718795,0.0,0.11683516554209356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841310206106356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14612809024364598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985015752548444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12707630506257833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519344112581146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550335225707845,0.0,0.13427091903067465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322494369585195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19785288158208286
mentalhealth,TheFox225,2020/01/21,"Some positive things are happening for once in my life Today at school we had athletics. It was Interhigh so it was just our school's kids competing against each other. Amyways, so i took part in A few items, Javelin, Discus, shot put and 100m sprint. Originally i just would have took part in shot put and 100m sprint, but i decided to try a few other things. I wanted to try hurdles again, but i didn't because of an old knee injury, so i didn't want to risk getting hurt unnecesarily as i am in a provincial team for indoor cricket and i don't want to mess it up. But anyways. So i got in for javelin and shot put and idk about the 100m yet. I was very anxious before running the 100m, but instead of fueling those negative thoughts i tried saying positive things to myself like i am strong i can do this etc, it calmed me down, and even if i didn't win, i was pretty fine with my result. I just did it for the fun anyways. Me and my two friends spent the day together. For once in a very long time i was genuinely happy. I wake up each day plastering a fake smile onto my face but today i was happy. It felt good. I'm battling multiple mentall illnesses but i'm trying to pick up the pieces one by one. Trying to fix myself. It's not easy and it's going to be a long road to recovery. But i'm trying. I thought i'd share something good for once. I guess sometimes when things seem dark there is sometimes a little light that shines through. After today i felt a little better too. I think the outside activity and being in the sun helped a little. We'll see tomorrow. I am really stiff and the sunburn is painful, but i'm used to being stiff, sunburn, not so much as i practically hibernate in my room 24/7.",3.064615384615383,4.387297512820517,4.574586894586896,85.4194871794872,73.87179487179488,7.8210826210826205,26.67521367521368,8.401726058763845,1.7223606837606842,1341,48,281,23,27,449,181,351,0.125,0.713,0.162,0.9455,0,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,3,0,0,5,18,19,1,1,18,0,26,10,3,4,0,47,49,27,0,5,14,0,2,1,1,2,7,1,1,1,17,14,0,2,7,1,1,7,7,6,0,3,19,6,37,13,40,25,11,41,0,1,2,0,9,19,0,4,16,190,54,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078681320977256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054384235150787184,0.0,0.07591483454913248,0.0,0.0,0.07890283604416998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507174083129718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949757467117723,0.058925231842824735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17131951901852818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06892677973558016,0.0,0.04661081178751846,0.0,0.0507025668070768,0.14965751554245216,0.07135285960927268,0.0,0.09827965641448187,0.0,0.0788919484674183,0.18994065312158226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059798493242525674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550579885695364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301472851291694,0.04358562137132696,0.2682486260016855,0.0,0.15790377146089174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990707383638978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655828068958851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361544502108224,0.2850310894708171,0.12090789477196437,0.0,0.09493035053440332,0.0,0.0,0.19322087817897474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076305949158836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690551662385347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057152992290713626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07094682598409267,0.0,0.1805793551405184,0.07109228037927523,0.08121738678605697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868155950065342,0.17647053194078124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370801799296715,0.05716494837815461,0.0,0.14165244526555362,0.052021600573978886,0.0,0.25369429548726485,0.0,0.19824083435202214,0.3634240943816964,0.0,0.08714944930417493,0.0,0.0,0.0770525476340793,0.0,0.14722235174373796,0.15786279207037904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337530925121115,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,joeyofoakland,2020/01/21,"Advice on delusional sister refusing treatment Hi Friends. My sister has had a psychotic break about 3 weeks ago. She thinks she is the reason trump is being impeached, that she’s behind the uprising in India, and that Russian Spies are out to get her. I suspect Bipolar 1 w/ delusions triggered by stress (she had just started a new job, which she was promptly fired from). 

Problem is, she thinks she’s totally fine. Gets extremely hurt when people don’t believe her and threatens to cut us all out, which she did for a terrifying 4 day period during which she drove 3 states away and appeared at my door step on the other side of the country with no car anymore (abandoned the car and flew.) she refuses treatment, and the mere mention of it right now is enough to almost loose her to ya entirely. She does not seem to be an immediate or clear danger to others- and not her self (not suicidal or anything, and has periods of total lucidity). 

Any advice on how to keep her safe, get her treatment? She also has periods where she thinks she’s a billionaire and is spending money like it too (tipped a server $100 yesterday.) she’s crashing with me for the time being, but can’t stay here forever (i have housemates). 

Thank you all for whatever insight you can offer.",6.322608089260813,7.042548317991635,6.670025104602512,75.6208256624826,65.82008368200837,9.720613668061366,34.343375174337524,9.725611199111238,3.3880491492329154,1004,44,176,20,15,325,156,239,0.106,0.843,0.051,-0.8502,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,1,3,0,0,9,11,2,1,13,0,20,1,0,3,5,41,33,14,1,1,7,2,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,9,12,0,5,7,0,2,6,6,6,0,0,6,1,30,5,27,24,5,32,0,2,0,0,34,11,0,5,13,127,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3251131572607751,0.14746040267672464,0.0,0.16657681143754227,0.0,0.0,0.13303108559616494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312459785730693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16497580342186732,0.0,0.0,0.13689295725974038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562925353258552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18742096521056525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072828355416078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455751557843254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718853757309509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12852261243924232,0.0,0.2607350867903685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17808252205138608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507801058145066,0.1478606911437179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127084922464442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16066313553073933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153270554496872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15917574113241995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103685642464725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14206311311193115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15143998842360226,0.1735407002338918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774431615862845,0.17730836683268772,0.0,0.0,0.19055486798907534,0.0,0.0,0.18196133745669665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315393980232522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197736148576659,0.0,0.0,0.09700078887607236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001001482816464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343698982532995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Violet_Goth,2020/01/21,"Missed so much school they're threatening me with juvie. Can't bring myself to care about it or anything. I've skipped so much school, mainly because my brain is sick. In November I had a manic episode along with the loss of a romantic relationship and straight up didn't go to to 75% of school that month. I can't even remember what I did during the hours I skipped, I just recall having sudden moments of clarity and realizing I had no idea where I was. I suffer from bipolar and DPDR (Depersonalization/Derealization) pretty heavily and I guess that's what happened. Now the school is threatening me with juvenile detention and my parents with court if my attendance doesn't improve. And honestly? Fuck them.

I just can't find it in me to care about school, or that I'm ruining my life, or that my brain will keep trying to kill me. It's not that I don't care, it's that I literally cannot. I've been through so much horrible shit, survived 6+ suicide attempts in the span of 4 years, succumbed to (and fought off) a drug addiction last year, and I just want a break. I have tried talking with the school seeking help and they never *help*. I don't cause issues for anyone but myself so they always forget about me.

I highly doubt I'll graduate at this point. I've seen other kids get put into specialized classes, coddled, all to help them graduate, kids who aren't doing nearly as bad as me, and I'm still left behind and forgotten. I simply don't care about graduating anymore. I'm not even suicidal right now, and I haven't gone back to drugs, but I just want a long rest because this is all so tiring.

Everybody holds me to the same standards as every normal person, but I'm not normal, I am extremely sick and to expect me to do as well as them is a cruel joke. I have cried out for help so many times but everybody can be deaf when they chose to it would appear.",4.774032258064518,5.635371220430107,5.6927698924731205,80.75115483870971,69.3225806451613,8.962752688172044,28.58967741935484,9.174902378510234,2.271968258064516,1482,51,293,28,25,488,195,372,0.161,0.7290000000000001,0.11,-0.9543,1,0,2,0,0,2,45.0,0,0,6,3,23,19,5,1,12,0,30,13,3,1,3,58,52,33,3,7,15,1,0,0,0,2,9,1,0,3,17,21,0,2,4,1,0,6,16,11,1,0,9,2,42,8,45,40,8,38,0,4,1,1,18,16,2,7,15,199,59,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542630198824126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728363088558765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681140909617109,0.06120665567019979,0.0,0.07203402116291678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673091749610007,0.07308824584459521,0.1067213057778534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19543649291163195,0.0,0.0,0.3569919310444791,0.08992277562054027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615332027249253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20302611113909133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156323641969612,0.0,0.07375219164714945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000559812312638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092489316176127,0.04573353549551326,0.0,0.049748278346999616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642990505310503,0.0,0.0774070990651795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23469203031710226,0.09248575771334852,0.0,0.0,0.0862045513981655,0.0,0.0,0.09881659975906236,0.0,0.09136401918200536,0.0,0.07780531860964104,0.09684474288638407,0.0,0.0,0.0713528811178524,0.0,0.0,0.0951072641874885,0.0,0.06182870910558429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774659082307154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874696598307577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986977124899592,0.0,0.1930453587082678,0.0,0.06751255202870338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17153184495505225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09719749406193468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643237090862746,0.0,0.0,0.08274906941663411,0.0,0.0,0.08905478029137175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799706565588619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939800587716591,0.09916033146073563,0.07475459294051119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5315418482126036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985363741569377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699057335423599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914986292292358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035748779708688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05104248617743588,0.10060884948204643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886132625264133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032610722376762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870466833046996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621825032439261,0.0,0.0,0.1127396134132943
mentalhealth,edonoho,2020/01/21,"You Are Not Alone This is a story of friendship, brotherhood, heartbreak, and what can be accomplished when you take all that adversity you face and use it to do good. 

For those of you who may need to hear this message...
[Growth from Pain](https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=LVTPrqRFLYc)",5.8406249999999975,9.168976812500002,3.8873333333333338,84.29100000000003,72.54166666666666,8.006666666666666,28.35,8.841846274778883,2.520745,229,9,39,5,5,64,41,48,0.11800000000000001,0.6920000000000001,0.19,0.4479,0,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,4,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,6,1,1,1,1,7,10,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,6,8,1,2,0,1,0,0,7,0,0,1,1,29,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4214274708064682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3412898606738813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4586078155358154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017124724283008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4329721229191316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059394568177741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514324442883457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,teenp3nisgrindrrr9,2020/01/21,"I feel sick... ALL THE TIME I don't know how long it is now... it could be a year or so. I just feel sick, everything is pain. My head hurts, my stomach hurts, my eyes hurt, my back hurts, my muscles hurt, my bones, breathing is very hard to me and more I focus on it the more I feel this way. It's like having a hangover every damn day (I don't drink alcohol tho so I guess from what I've heard). When I wake up and get ready to school my vision is blurred like an hour or so. I'm sleeping more and more few last weeks... It's almost 9 hours everyday now and I feel it's not enough, I feel like I need more. It is really bad because I've got things to do and I'm not able to do them properly and that makes me anxious. I just want to sleep. I just want to end this pain somehow, it's constant, it's ruining my life, it's ruining what has left from it.

I'm 17 and I hate myself, I hate everything and everybody and (once again) I hate myself for it. I'm ugly, I have acne and I lost the only person I've ever loved (who was also able to help me). I have mood swings. I'm depressed. I have anxiety attacks. I'm suicidal. Yes, I have therapist. No, it doesn't seem to work at all. Yes, I smoke weed (but just a bit from time to time) and yes, I want to end my life, kinda... now... but unfortunately I'm a fucking  pussy (can I swear in this sub?) 

I'm sorry for wasting your time. I needed to vent all this (and kinda hoped somebody could help me with my condition... 😇) and this sub seemed like a good place to me... Sorry 😅😅

I just need help or something 

Thanks for anything",-0.7144469026548634,1.27887766961652,1.7429786135693242,97.66119358407082,89.41297935103245,5.041917404129794,17.324557522123893,6.508806274219699,-0.318068495575222,1186,30,291,14,40,403,161,339,0.17300000000000001,0.701,0.126,-0.8523,0,0,4,0,0,1,70.0,0,1,1,2,19,27,6,0,9,3,21,18,8,2,4,55,56,25,1,9,12,0,6,4,0,0,7,1,0,1,23,14,2,0,8,1,0,0,6,18,0,0,4,8,45,8,23,49,11,29,0,9,1,2,9,6,2,12,26,171,68,2,0.16846163299781447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001712661029904,0.08434499560742083,0.0,0.0,0.0673593535224203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443634407178088,0.0951568472950549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931478504791103,0.0,0.0,0.09582471372299103,0.0,0.06476829862964552,0.07032921345303192,0.05134632393556052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195823602659824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910235890895466,0.0,0.1345029061009186,0.0,0.0,0.054321908400206016,0.0,0.07254787882588433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251413316217784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492070047742988,0.08703294975989387,0.0,0.0,0.07619159582851341,0.07096809574565621,0.0,0.1514024532696336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21294815837353184,0.06017451213693225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787003257594509,0.044007125121933874,0.0,0.0,0.0706488125752625,0.06736707858570035,0.0,0.09278974063976576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545426696457233,0.24948147879860705,0.08644511831902707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16937442236942302,0.0,0.0,0.08366020632086114,0.1659007744910264,0.0,0.4508541558263182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046291053921644086,0.06865935758393006,0.0,0.0,0.09151702858210556,0.0,0.11898943338872355,0.1646036891139362,0.0,0.0,0.07454162201231497,0.0,0.0,0.09194788626844792,0.0,0.07602160048090334,0.0,0.05622472407602985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873682494474177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897030705748709,0.0,0.06406133153337704,0.1792550549379283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354710003279791,0.0880032756259319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396041790252334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524608316556857,0.0,0.15336114370475734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685832939744618,0.0,0.0,0.06484499768622709,0.0,0.18857900598401986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213484203508138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754841906509786,0.0,0.09779847004484578,0.055959211725687415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964626658671836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949924497632276,0.14904455374877865,0.06685850151504424,0.0675648802708945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061321037595387234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424188420949912
mentalhealth,dexhead_littleton,2020/01/21,"Im freaking out. I just recently decided to stop abusing dissociatives. The more I sit and think about it the mors it scares me that I might have messed up my mental state/health. I've been having waves of panic, then I'm okay, then I'm anxious to go do more research and then it starts over again. I feel like I just have to go back to the dissos to clear my head but I know that won't help anything. I'm just looking for advice, your opinions, anything to be honest because I feel like I'm the only one trying.",1.6595327102803736,3.579636682242988,3.02972897196262,92.39879906542058,79.37383177570094,5.401495327102804,21.914953271028036,6.2581,0.2523577570093458,403,12,87,3,10,131,69,107,0.14400000000000002,0.737,0.11900000000000001,0.0678,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,2,4,1,8,1,1,0,1,16,20,6,0,0,4,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,5,0,0,2,1,4,0,1,1,3,11,4,12,16,2,14,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,2,10,54,16,1,0.0,0.23224170031964045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915402722236446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221437321593394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226016999121176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072082546239554,0.0,0.1194868553253148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19821871433914687,0.2800614600959762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.222795824852622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20116445646874825,0.2083511706023708,0.0,0.0,0.13138244733847393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117261695700707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772285217016583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191522738919472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16460038173437935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975335958007972,0.2079373378503576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328225366252759,0.1490756585122239,0.0,0.22997738585301275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935378132958537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19624181148577227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387380231537099,0.0,0.0,0.163874478915841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12559632212536104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13307901351289167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Anarchimedes_,2020/01/21,"[Advice] Take a vacation from yourself! Here is something I sometimes use, when I just need an evening off from my constant overthinking.

When I have a night out that doesn't involve social interaction with people that know me (cinema, theatre, meetup, concert), I try take a vacation from myself to rest my spirit.

What that means is, I see myself as a person without a past, no memories of mistakes, no missing skills, no screwed up possibilities. Just a person that I know nothing of except for what I see in this very moment.

And I confirm that this person has a right to enjoy themself.

Any guilty thought that pops up, any cringe about my past has to be violently pushed back and denied from being thought about, because THAT'S AGAINST THE RULES!

After a while I always get into an extremely great mood.

You should try this! Everyone needs a vacation from time to time especially from an angry conscience.",6.1119090909090925,7.847467296969698,6.0779545454545465,75.97693181818181,66.93939393939394,8.40909090909091,32.53787878787879,8.841846274778883,2.9096969696969697,724,31,119,12,12,228,105,165,0.129,0.782,0.08900000000000001,-0.8352,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,1,10,7,2,0,13,0,9,1,0,1,0,19,23,6,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,12,5,0,0,5,2,0,1,5,4,0,0,2,3,16,2,27,18,1,20,1,1,2,1,7,7,1,0,12,91,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484332378764199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12639153443777934,0.0,0.0,0.2065920737862905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680039857450104,0.0,0.09259577953872423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641480741393814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032737909907773,0.0,0.0,0.14514531273670253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793605801466449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16746838618540766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16695864065840882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654617537091346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22526129478666426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14254624270563093,0.0,0.14575049310458907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900081853014689,0.10530713920888628,0.39789514837885015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712424837166176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297202982473829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420865202076583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15484116397961425,0.0,0.1169387143951812,0.1502312795736124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22841720003961025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411805288161813,0.17714621322315302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20625791787592446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119134053904194,0.0,0.12533198625887412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642451812741664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StoopidQuestionAsker,2020/01/21,"Does anyone else ever get flashes of almost not recognizing people close to you? It's a little hard to explain, but sometimes when I'm sitting with my husband I'll suddenly get a flash of feeling like I'm sitting with a stranger. Like ""Woah... do I know this person?"" It barely lasts a second but afterwards I'll find myself mentally talking through my memory of our life together, almost reminding myself of everything we've been through and that he's ""safe"" to be with so to speak? The feeling lingers for a few minutes after. 

Does anyone else get feelings like this occasionally?",6.650674603174608,7.706413194444441,7.143809523809527,71.32500000000002,65.2037037037037,9.504761904761905,36.72486772486773,9.606745405546679,3.8084534391534386,467,23,75,9,7,153,73,108,0.01,0.8540000000000001,0.136,0.9209999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,6,0,3,1,0,0,1,18,13,5,0,0,3,1,4,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,5,5,0,1,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,7,4,15,11,1,10,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,2,9,45,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34054866121929345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23779719601507224,0.3484599925508655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29761299896012433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28409959690534425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15381437730064262,0.0,0.0,0.15282442780088906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579378055128144,0.2429586888964572,0.0,0.0,0.15541697786676406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665226449380353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523258695611782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345164064516852,0.13860841498062124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010698426133695,0.2492244748302051,0.17042858741987305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713641835342768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788697957662644,0.1484757114062091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681776935534721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366747875179022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,delkim1,2020/01/21,"Highly sensitive spiritual person gift Background story: all my life I had suffered with what I thought was anxiety and depression, I first came across the term anxiety at the age of 15 and ever since that day I’ve been fascinated by everything to do with the mind , I’m 28 now , at the age of 27 I discovered that I have a highly sensitive personality, I now had full understanding of my entire life and exactly what’s going on in my mind , I always knew I could feel and take on others emotions , I always knew if anyone came to be with a problem of any kind id take it on as if it was mine , I’ve always been able to know exactly what to do to diffuse any situation, I always new I could read every detail about a persons body language in seconds and link everything about them together to come up with one outcome ,
Over the past few years I got extremely deeply intouch with my spiritual side to try and combat all the anxiety , pretty much devoted my life to it if work was quite I’d spend the shift researching pretty much anything mind related , I’d get home and watch talks about it on YouTube , read books about it and meditate religiously every night 
I’ve had major success in myself through meditating, I find it easy to distinguish my thoughts and what they truly are . I used to get stuck in the same anxious thought patterns for weeks , now my mind seems to be able to subconsciously pick up on a negative/anxious/depressive thought train within seconds of it starting , because I know what it is and how it works I can literally choose to remove myself from the thought trail , I managed to full blown feel and talk to my inner child from my higher self , I could feel the entity of it whilst managing to speak to it from a place of serious deep compassion , I’d learnt to completely feel all bad emotion and anxiety inside myself and just letting it be there , learning to do that changed my life immensely, now I found out I have highly sensitive personality I’ve realised it was always the underlying thing causing the majority of my anxiety and it shaped me up to be who I am today , but due to all the mind work I’ve done I now find it very easy to distinguish the thought processes that are just my sensitivity and not get dragged down with them 

I feel like I have a major gift and want to use it to help others 
I regularly get people come up to me with there problems and it hardly takes me any effort at all to work out exactly what’s going on in there mind to cause it , sometimes it actually blows my mind how obvious it is to me and how they can’t see it themselves, but I’ve realised that’s all to do with me being HSP and being able to collect all the smallest of details and merge them together to reach my outcome 
I seem to be able to say sentences that people are about to say before they’ve even said a thing , on a regular basis I get people say to me ‘ how the F... did you know I was going to say that’ 
I can feel the energy of a room of people instantly ,
I can draw the mind , I’ve worked out how certain mind processes work to the point where I can draw a diagram explaining what’s happening 
I can draw a picture of the mind seeing/being a thought , I can also draw a picture of the mind observing a passing thought from the conscious 
I feel I know processes of the mind that are either majorly overlooked or are simply not known to others yet
I could ramble on and on about what I’ve noticed I feel compared to the norm

I always knew there was something different about me and I never realised until coming across the term highly sensitive personality that not everyone has these abilities! People around me can see it to 

I need help knowing what to do with all this! Currently work full time as a technician earning good money but that doesn’t do it for me whatsoever, I want to use this gift and even explore more deeply into it to help others who are struggling",10.845929682217717,6.904433882352947,10.616362407031783,65.93294117647059,59.84967320261438,14.107279693486593,42.71917962587335,11.876931179488293,4.861489970700925,3100,125,588,68,29,1032,299,765,0.040999999999999995,0.872,0.08800000000000001,0.9879,2,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,5,12,30,13,0,1,40,0,53,5,1,11,15,142,112,39,0,12,13,0,9,1,0,0,4,6,2,7,54,42,0,0,39,3,2,11,6,7,0,4,30,18,74,6,116,70,23,84,0,2,3,0,27,47,0,6,27,414,128,16,0.17751746901636714,0.0,0.04330786063930358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03549016395927344,0.22156313227434746,0.0,0.0,0.09053847469839264,0.0,0.16975047238855165,0.10027210582491644,0.0,0.03103108545574608,0.0,0.03652043788296391,0.039507045828386066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037054917929758034,0.027053250363699925,0.0,0.037763572838383684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049295472407108236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151634668068953,0.0,0.09117967005857676,0.04694748606072922,0.11468668581501147,0.046530922213119386,0.0,0.0,0.1417332542816495,0.0,0.0,0.02862102046543918,0.0,0.07644776797245079,0.0,0.0,0.04636699311370161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04541550088814087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984162972264896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05862430703909336,0.040143678448051036,0.07478306195597394,0.04240638724728681,0.07977062737971571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951633227564073,0.03170462883374004,0.0,0.0,0.08112387534042535,0.0377490671151202,0.0,0.048659685540056896,0.0,0.0,0.11593193849714192,0.0,0.07566545140026022,0.0372233076879143,0.03549423412545033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03924452789768226,0.0,0.039755196063574715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923966318051542,0.1875569524011523,0.04451612382828345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046214281714107394,0.12194869811064107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04538090981143288,0.1253858381815155,0.021681517151921757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5377261174935959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524788257440021,0.03290673848998843,0.0342281039275636,0.04286186943934317,0.0,0.041647029827179306,0.0,0.0,0.050526203763249136,0.0,0.0,0.03007260779842458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04236512767410637,0.15383532685264395,0.1937517584713968,0.04636699311370161,0.0,0.041952846734301184,0.0,0.0,0.09029954233587448,0.0,0.08493012179540246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04720291983901951,0.08878275388228621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04221494103148368,0.14116901639130466,0.0,0.0,0.07072921977092644,0.08080261835131647,0.04629735882637566,0.0,0.0,0.03671107119631188,0.04988426821619663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034165405091913584,0.043892328991779125,0.0,0.03141194456179585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04639495044766508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010328328402844,0.07134090867657067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058967359255171874,0.0,0.0,0.2818580830105765,0.025877965935278503,0.0,0.04206645101366968,0.0,0.0,0.030130677227352826,0.0,0.0,0.04620048643395719,0.0,0.11498857287554347,0.0,0.03661762576795555,0.052352201272441126,0.0,0.03559845148906598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261609554168427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028578857476924888
mentalhealth,NemeanHamster,2020/01/21,"Pros and Cons of being your ""True Self""? I recently stumbled upon this article: [https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/pleasing-others-bad-person-feeling-0308124/](https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/pleasing-others-bad-person-feeling-0308124/)

I relate to most of it but I'm currently struggling to decide whether or not its better to stick with the ""people pleasing"" way of living or to gamble on figuring out who I really am and then acting in accordance with that.

The main thing I'd like to optimize for is the amount of happiness and well being I can make for others through either my direct actions or as a consequence of my actions.

To help me make a better decision I'd like to ask:

In your experience what are the pros and cons of being your true self?

Thank you in advance for your replies.",11.041666666666664,13.026527095238096,8.346150793650796,63.27732142857143,55.82539682539682,10.109523809523813,31.62301587301588,10.125756701596842,3.2464158730158736,658,20,93,12,8,190,80,126,0.066,0.695,0.239,0.9794,1,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,5,0,3,1,10,0,1,6,0,7,0,0,2,2,22,12,11,0,0,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,8,7,0,0,3,0,1,4,1,1,1,0,0,0,12,9,26,9,4,14,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,4,5,74,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17944516696037774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205365852652096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33952424368251793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877616599744793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043318714157732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865848180765646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18755187865805245,0.0,0.1694933154327446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25625312978716785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13307235076320106,0.33520261557333697,0.0,0.21070090853702916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296659698540152,0.0,0.18952517429416485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4004865786812841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20066538830599265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17671963199504787,0.0,0.0,0.12752150749320976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235913157121508,0.0,0.0,0.1725840136095241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymous057,2020/01/21,Self-destructive behavior Is not going to the doctor despite having severe symptoms some form of self-destructive behavior? Or is it something else because you don't actively engage in it?,9.53125,11.014264625000004,9.45625,55.763750000000016,59.0,12.65,44.125,12.161744961471696,6.632075,156,9,18,5,2,51,27,32,0.134,0.799,0.067,-0.2901,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,5,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,15,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953000661019656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32792148439127394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26763554621784624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18207877009773654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6684503427558548,0.361937080249443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24664340820962236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.332996454233963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,actuallychristina,2020/01/21,"amazing apps that help me soooo fcking much i think you should try the ***HappyNotPerfect*** app, they have amaaazing emotion guide meditations and things called daily routines. when u do a daily routine, you start off by selecting how you feel (wobbly, weird, frustrated, overwhelmed, i don't know, etc). Then there is a paper bag breathing animation which you breathe to for a couple minutes. then you write on a little notepad what the problem is. They'll ask you things like ""putting this anger aside, what are you **still** grateful for?"". You'll also get a quick mini game to stimulate the mind. Finally, there's a quick 3-minute dive-in session tailored to help you feel better a little (tailored to your emotions). it helps me so fucking much. the app is free but i paid the full version to unlock **all** their longer guided meditation sessions, sleep guided meditations, sounds, asmr, etc.

also you might wanna download ***Noisly***. it's also free. you can play nature sounds that play on forever. you can also mix different sounds, e.g. you can turn on bird chirping noises + a small river + a person's footsteps. it's amazing. again, if you pay for the full price, you're getting a **LOT** of options, but it's worth the shot!

psa im not associated to these apps in any way, though i'd love to work for happynotperfect one day!!

i think Calm is great, but overrated. so i thought i'd share two of my go-to apps for sleep and feeling better when i have anxiety, anguish, etc.",1.6164485514485527,4.328380747252748,2.390212287712288,88.97694680319681,95.00732600732599,4.6796203796203795,22.688061938061928,6.464625207383525,0.8600923076923069,1156,45,209,15,44,360,165,273,0.057999999999999996,0.733,0.209,0.9917,1,0,0,0,0,0,78.0,0,15,3,3,16,20,3,2,17,0,16,6,4,2,1,25,31,18,0,4,5,0,3,1,0,4,0,3,0,1,13,2,0,0,7,3,6,1,2,7,0,2,2,6,27,15,21,25,10,23,0,1,0,2,28,10,1,4,12,128,40,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3694499156009866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785415546740123,0.0,0.08835447727030159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079736010545924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20429446976319515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179348009379012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779463837892796,0.0,0.07448566317913323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066922057747015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598359486083702,0.0,0.0,0.38642725558292507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17519544433936848,0.0,0.0,0.12652072865274308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067746179951583,0.12068426886496893,0.0,0.06563930094785288,0.0,0.0,0.12733525704723966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23224453166894346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475599820722985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347383499880131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056425737361138574,0.2315155937827205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981909617642933,0.10424006620020963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225234943831072,0.11661850223747315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698063774650194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826339169480262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084705567568436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105145159560969,0.0,0.11610584460483235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231159744243502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174899023103817,0.0,0.09223562371267703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15346143458956782,0.14801093856015365,0.11347468746636025,0.09169128971481548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841451628273882,0.12562698496657276,0.11282326104085835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916757155846216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840827998617894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CoffeeTar,2020/01/21,"I'm not mentally strong enough to live I don't feel like I should be alive. I am such a weak person. I cannot accomplish anything in life because I don't have the strength or will to fight for anything. 
I feel like a weak animal that should just be killed to end is misery, because I won't achieve anything anyway. I'm not gonna be able to get far the way I was born.",2.251541666666668,3.221111737500003,3.4750000000000014,93.89666666666668,75.375,6.833333333333335,24.583333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.7187083333333333,289,9,69,3,6,94,51,80,0.34299999999999997,0.626,0.031,-0.9747,0,0,0,0,1,0,6.0,0,0,0,4,3,8,2,0,4,0,14,3,0,0,0,8,20,1,1,2,4,0,2,2,0,5,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,1,2,8,4,6,11,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,40,9,2,0.22567155097390376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5571253739676537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751345657321688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19987801129782184,0.2331790379641388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22821263368764744,0.3224396022141297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790407113408785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496721351306613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939849035351347,0.22050344139101502,0.0,0.199272114004433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274238448664391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19704769375291145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17912757301701895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HandsomeJacq,2020/01/21,"I've never told anyone how much I actually hate myself and how much I blamemyself for every bad thing in my life. I have no idea what to do with my life and if plan A fails then it's off to plan B, suicide. I'm still in school, but if I fail I suspect my anxiety & depression will get the better of me.",1.8604477611940275,2.702306985074628,4.253910447761196,88.43101492537315,76.16417910447761,7.748059701492537,22.35522388059701,8.238735603445708,0.9490620895522386,236,6,56,4,5,83,51,67,0.33,0.621,0.05,-0.9620000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,5,3,6,1,0,2,0,3,2,0,2,1,11,7,8,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,10,1,8,5,2,6,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,2,3,39,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.23248835222415384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581334720320328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18225332321804905,0.0,0.0,0.16658329039661665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989208583411852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107043535298393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051961854587621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20072788856074936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447082332620107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352131613888997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689445151580913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33655260824185673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502683457901078,0.0,0.1837457534130532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24111209554253765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19025916354298064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605964287228608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582763958536774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22764899834266256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,compellinglymediocre,2020/01/21,"How do I find my focus again? Over the last 6 months my focus and concentration has just completely lapsed. I can’t study, I have no motivation. I got myself into a very good university onto the most demanding course there is. I studied very hard to get here and now I’ve lost my fire. What did you do to find your flow again?",1.5533766233766249,3.867845939393941,3.2841125541125566,88.31045454545458,82.03030303030303,6.8017316017316025,18.51948051948052,7.957251820313856,0.6214571428571434,256,6,55,5,7,85,51,66,0.16699999999999998,0.7490000000000001,0.084,-0.5504,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,2,7,2,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,2,0,9,10,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,2,11,1,5,7,1,9,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,5,38,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017197683433253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5260303409143423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15034714965132576,0.0,0.0,0.2413665416114027,0.2301547355714161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25778402783006243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345697129960893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3141332813407359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22969404924111464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4748782546534215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aaaaaaaaaaaaaan,2020/01/21,"Any programmers take antipsychotics? I have been trying to learn programming and am making progress but slowly. I feel like the antipsychotics that I have to take are holding me back and worry that despite my efforts I will never be good enough to get a job.

It would mean a lot if any successful programmer that takes antipsychotics would comment.",8.123524590163933,9.634090491803278,6.606680327868855,74.85788934426232,62.114754098360656,10.69016393442623,34.92213114754098,10.686352973137794,4.034472131147541,284,12,45,7,4,84,46,61,0.10300000000000001,0.743,0.154,0.5253,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,3,0,9,0,0,1,1,13,16,4,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,6,3,3,11,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,33,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32036640614691136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811246832564728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24338782694103275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910199449889815,0.1682781496737656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230660179035471,0.0,0.0,0.19756955286584107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23374867175470446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507864064829068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20025759400293547,0.0,0.0,0.1572325590592594,0.0,0.0,0.25658480705022324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816719579332256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5313165902569549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15992411199088233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23921413999472796,0.0,0.33465827535923376,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DeadShadowKitty,2020/01/21,"I hate living like this I feel so alone. Some days it drives me insane not being able to speak to people. 
I’m useless
I’m a parasite
I’m not special 
I am god awful 
I’m nothing but a waste
Waste of space
Waste of everyone’s time and effort

Why can’t I be good enough? Why can’t I be a decent person?",-1.8220588235294104,0.08173032352941334,1.4649411764705889,96.67123529411768,98.70588235294115,3.896470588235295,14.152941176470588,5.6839178017228535,-0.8600988235294116,234,5,55,2,10,83,46,68,0.188,0.595,0.217,0.7193,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,1,0,3,1,6,0,0,0,0,6,12,3,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,2,6,3,4,9,2,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,28,8,0,0.27542609317145283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852583683620069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17762704466340268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845887802816905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631814351512424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926370833562698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310143394497333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719262453666169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455927681422872,0.0,0.2432062863103383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26427876468081984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19094577362578632,0.240491440877655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16060316984624307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4970584185978184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hornkneegovmt,2020/01/21,What can I do? I can’t name the feeling but every morning when I wake up I feel dread. I don’t have the energy to wake up in the morning but knowing I HAVE to get up and go throughout my day makes me start to cry. This goes for everyday even the weekends. No matter what I’m doing that day I always start off my day by thinking about how I wish I wasn’t here.,-0.003875000000000739,1.746448362500001,2.3225000000000016,96.2225,84.125,5.0,20.0,5.985473137389443,-0.16087499999999988,279,8,67,2,8,95,52,80,0.138,0.754,0.10800000000000001,-0.6542,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,0,8,2,2,2,0,12,19,5,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,2,12,0,11,18,0,14,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,8,47,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23174699278840996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.305935915339471,0.5388578704212619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18395669064370715,0.0,0.2346611037031208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816513496688463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14551271868593732,0.0,0.15828663045145186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15306469323574262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18591108678426324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3942690436864854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784613211622719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.320278783227695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Veck_Plays1,2020/01/21,"I can't leave myself alone For the past 4 months, I have been severely depressed, due to a major break up I had experienced. Since then I've been telling myself that I must've done something to cause it. This caused me to start thinking terribly about myself and now I'm at a point where I want to hurt myself and I can't think that I have any positive qualities. How could I get out of this train of thought?",3.7932142857142854,4.83524236904762,4.3390476190476175,88.88928571428572,71.73809523809524,7.980952380952381,25.904761904761905,8.344100000000001,1.3977047619047624,325,10,71,5,6,103,59,84,0.16399999999999998,0.74,0.096,-0.8182,0,1,1,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,9,0,0,3,0,11,16,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,5,1,13,0,11,10,1,12,0,2,0,0,1,5,0,0,6,47,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339188585214275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535899281011267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4640329654956032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18032775905913065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19452957251866732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311292587816276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800051740025427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24178368167496656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391490536083816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802762255025698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156052529646792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21350706652693255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551531640360885,0.0,0.18683054262864626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17387509992056568,0.0,0.0,0.15986214665647958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974082316085166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28943900468978284,0.0,0.17930455608179854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321581001042693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sexxxysaida,2020/01/21,"I want to help others to be mentally better but I can’t help myself All the online validations I’ve been having for the past days are just prolonging the agony: another depression relapse. 

I don’t feel genuinely happy from receiving them. 

I can’t help myself. I don’t understand what I feel again. I stopped taking meds without my psych knowing because I just don’t feel like taking any of it. 

I thought I was doing better. But I am not. I wanted to help others but I need to help myself first. I’ve been having bad self hurt tendencies again and it’s crap. I don’t know what to do. Several people and work are stressing me out. I’m nervous that my depression will badly relapse again. I’ve had it last August to November and I was very suicidal then. If it gets back, idk what I’d be doing anymore. 

I’m getting tired. Tired of everything, everyone, myself.",1.6877058823529405,4.272330888235294,3.689705882352944,83.74867647058825,84.23529411764707,6.9294117647058835,23.794117647058826,8.07648339933343,1.8135529411764708,681,26,126,15,20,230,95,170,0.26899999999999996,0.578,0.153,-0.9811,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,4,6,12,1,2,3,0,22,3,1,0,1,24,38,8,1,4,8,0,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,10,4,0,1,7,0,0,1,8,8,0,1,6,3,23,4,12,29,1,13,0,3,0,0,8,1,1,1,12,87,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981072373180689,0.13848474372036287,0.0,0.0,0.13097590253751498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155208896340104,0.22054241634932412,0.08050738658527874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23360670997653676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851728915416415,0.0,0.2274998355834553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261965703161236,0.11869414303772916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20033254645824264,0.09434935823776552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123369169550308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800008893117993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14058877123785585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4426117604987141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14138145454090012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451621649949808,0.10765299285384967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452172140643253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14669770177812505,0.0,0.13309341447992512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792669942643628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607378653363074,0.09155927633757874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777565781572992,0.1491991734604728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041470620026933,0.15128337186493135,0.0,0.0,0.1444608839963085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985973002001168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484718724208164,0.0,0.30358532366578594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374873766280343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089698765916674,0.1557941781400907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730877525057338,0.0,0.09614702866943144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BolachaBaunilha,2020/01/21,"I am attracted to schizofreniac guy It may be weird but I am (somehow) mentally healthy, however the only guy I am interested in suffers from schizofrenia. I was about to look for other people with such beautiful minds, because this company was the only genuely interesting thing that happened to me when it comes to relationships -regular people bore me as hell.   
 However schizofrenia is a mental illness - is it okay if I am attracted to this?",4.521025641025641,7.772287512820518,5.792564102564104,68.9691025641026,77.71794871794873,9.620512820512822,35.5897435897436,9.725611199111238,4.8629128205128245,358,21,52,12,9,119,54,78,0.17600000000000002,0.589,0.235,0.7184,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,9,1,0,3,1,10,1,0,0,0,7,13,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,1,7,5,11,9,0,3,1,1,1,0,3,1,1,3,1,44,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599315408775854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063026410124299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4742728890379639,0.21178351330956605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20111441403345684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4827066979165026,0.0,0.2418203939540659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3642915452859557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3320695927536179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25712663654973145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910899152879351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Putrid-Light,2020/01/21,"Somethings wrong with me.... any professionals on here? Hey im looking to see if theres any professionals on here that could shed some light... i have been diagnosed by a phsycotherapist with ptsd. But on a 8month waiting list for phsychiatrist. Anyways , im 30 , male. Grew up in a severely bad home. 

Age 0 - 3 , bounced back between my grans house and my moms house. Dad beat me with a cast when i was 4.5 i remember this. 

Ages 4 to 11 

Mother had many boyfreinds , would party and do drugs in the house , although i had younger siblings me and my older brother were locked in the bedroom from 3pm till the next morning. Typical school week. When it was the weekend me and my older brother would hide in the closet hole we made behind the dresser because when drunk my mother and her neices and freinds would come into our room , pee on us , throw us into freezing showers , try suffocate us with pillows , and at night when the partys dying out i would hear my brother getting raped and eventually me. This happened for years , and when my mother was bored she would lock me in the cellar crawl space for hours on end with the lights off. with a demonic statue. Which i eventually started to talk to. My other siblings were treated soo good and protected by my mothers sisters exc , and growing up in a small town my mother and her siblings labelled me and my older brother as the towns theives and fuck ups at AGE 11 and 13 but we didnt do any of that , i was molested in school by ms.dueck she was a TA and helped me read because i was assumed to be mute. But my jaw hurt and i was always on edge to focus in school. The teachers knew i was being abused but nothing was done! They even let the other kids , thanks to my aunty val telling the other parents how bad we were bully me and my older brother , i remember i was invited to a birthday party when i was 10 , i shoveled driveways for 2 whole days and hid some of that money minus what my mother took , i baught a wicked birthday present , i walked the logans party which was 2 miles and to be yelled at to F*&^ off by his parents. I was chased with vehicles by other kids in higher grades than me. My moms freind who was gay babysat me and ny older brother , and i wish i wouldhave been babysat by my abusive cousins than this guy, his name was richard a CONVICTED CHILD RAPIST , thats all ill say. 

Then when i was 13 my mother remarried a biker , he was the devil! Also a pedophile but loved to beat the s... out of me and my older brother till i started fighting back , i was fist fighting a grown man who was 6'5 350lbs everyday till i was 18. Including everyone else. I was fine until 2 years ago just after my son was born , my saviour and the light of my life. But the last 2 years ive been having reoccurent thoughts of my son being kidnapped , raped and murdered and me having to bury his little body , this sends me into a furious rage and i begin to have severe anxiety and thoughts of murdering people who even look at him wrong with my bare hands. Im scared to finally blow up and go on a rampage. Im EXTREMELY strong , and a large man and would do irreversable damage. Whats wrong with me...",5.035978260869566,5.642386605475043,5.457020531400968,83.5901684782609,68.61352657004831,8.077954911433173,30.98393719806764,7.993328176185818,2.059765507246378,2466,96,488,29,40,789,299,621,0.18600000000000005,0.763,0.052000000000000005,-0.9984,4,0,2,0,5,0,72.0,7,0,1,3,18,27,11,1,34,0,52,15,4,2,1,78,73,54,3,9,8,23,2,0,0,6,4,3,8,7,20,49,1,2,6,3,1,9,1,21,0,0,37,11,81,6,81,24,4,90,2,2,3,6,61,38,1,4,43,329,101,7,0.0,0.17799912527268258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658534216583492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06006982343953182,0.0625020980071298,0.08138759285276102,0.0,0.15324330977614076,0.0,0.05746313776886915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551833738626065,0.12543657900037924,0.0915794006856526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834363664045447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06470533615716245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0599735997978132,0.0,0.0,0.048443271436871535,0.0,0.0,0.07624063258253955,0.07795801062104599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686921714137873,0.0,0.0,0.08711011098551921,0.0,0.06274934620864668,0.0,0.06653002117775866,0.0,0.0,0.09922613423664034,0.0,0.0,0.07177606160332553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228533839828431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944305227796878,0.03924473882125478,0.0,0.042689859189360566,0.0630033020758734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437613635198467,0.06642437224259631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466060690906024,0.0,0.050348323901878766,0.0,0.07534695251467265,0.0,0.07397361844365474,0.26001954145742,0.08041267655115401,0.0,0.324550439726703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06122914297515612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681066909204266,0.05305628603198724,0.0,0.07528544603618935,0.0,0.0,0.12615617233229234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677946547832962,0.07107608483823337,0.0,0.07615530842845684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17594868823395818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988616677167443,0.07049079095183737,0.0,0.07207533040193524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16681370583804148,0.0,0.0,0.052075616970410715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780597820930644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751358088441686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17018239536663005,0.0,0.0,0.05973484582579855,0.07520370101131245,0.2280626325917575,0.05985731354370411,0.0,0.0,0.16971822670993633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05782756749071233,0.0,0.0,0.10633424888567734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060374978728403375,0.06565424170441232,0.06915624330783918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926660370518093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345606383470093,0.05099848124786347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27106402665895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06025310838582865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386375259761028,0.08637909669524227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201592974545936,0.2463809616753565,0.0,0.14511572203885367
mentalhealth,digitak-loops,2020/01/21,"What is reality? I had been having extremely bad delusions and i know they are irrational and extremely stupid but i'm almost certain that my whole life is gonna come to some sort of change due to everyone plotting against me. I do have ASD (high functioning) but this past year I have been having delusions, audios in my head, paranoia and really bad hallucinations. I have reached the end where I cant sleep for more than one hour each night because they tell me that i'll die in my sleep, I am content with it yes. It's getting to the point where I just know that my own girlfriend and family are plotting against me and want me to suffer and end up alone, I constantly feel the need to die due to the audios in my head telling me that's what i'm made for. I'm extremely lonely as well and isolated from the world around me I have to be an adult right? How am i gonna function to do so when i can't even stand the thought of existing at all. I cant seek therapy as an escape from this torture due to lack of money and unloving parents, I feel as though I have very little options and i'll end up doing something irrational soon if this keeps getting worse. Is there anything I can try doing that'll make some of these things dissolve for at least a moment? Or even a friend is welcomed with open arms.",3.957118172790469,5.0647330415094345,4.58834160873883,87.00823237338629,71.41509433962264,7.843098311817279,28.286991062562066,8.20500826718156,1.7344339622641507,1036,38,217,15,19,331,146,265,0.204,0.723,0.073,-0.9917,1,3,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,0,13,11,2,0,10,1,28,6,5,3,2,39,46,20,2,4,5,1,2,0,2,3,1,2,0,1,14,15,0,1,5,0,1,1,3,7,1,1,5,4,29,4,34,37,9,32,0,2,0,0,9,16,0,7,14,149,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12866820806298945,0.13308106117971294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057396365979694,0.11438692718691558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21457429226980596,0.07832876679679489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359296438656737,0.11068622743578682,0.0,0.1388563958687717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667130288322417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34142270913342443,0.0,0.0,0.16973818720320402,0.0,0.0,0.1227815501919978,0.0,0.0,0.1211327338708682,0.0,0.12994088268504386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927416724705301,0.0,0.1342656524116249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26374388639896296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576099533551755,0.0,0.0,0.12654073437490582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11421139598143105,0.0,0.0,0.14123391469881413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075913195738247,0.0,0.12878477259319351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158415609713415,0.08577076142573525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952766935792665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058294080216912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707087878708111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14267741178987794,0.0,0.1226620890757793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214683893482192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231656457916603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097331977855492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571736495904414,0.0,0.0,0.09892098036224757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22461888805485453,0.0,0.1469441193206298,0.0,0.0853657225957356,0.0,0.12624473005610246,0.10200990526609162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723901040510829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060210300378201,0.07578910684740141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155315626349052,0.0,0.0,0.14345899341425689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13094639202782618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274594115436021
mentalhealth,hitherehi1,2020/01/21,"I can't understand why I feel so empty I've never been this good in my whole life.
I have a boyfriend
I have real friends
It's going well in school
People like me

After years of depressive episodes and suicidal thoughts, and self harming, and eating problems I'm fine again. But I still feel like absolute trash. Nothing's good enough. I don't feel fulfilled. 

I can't stop crying myself to sleep. And I can't stop making myself throw up in the morning to get away from school.

Last year I used to go to school like 3 times a week. And I miss that so much. I can't do it anymore, everything is so tiring and I feel sick all the time. I just want to cry.",0.551764705882352,2.8542491764705886,1.9544117647058847,96.1898529411765,86.64705882352942,4.870588235294118,19.529411764705888,6.322622252153567,-0.02887352941176502,512,15,113,5,16,164,86,136,0.18,0.621,0.19899999999999998,-0.0563,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,7,12,0,0,4,0,10,5,1,2,2,23,24,10,1,2,2,0,4,3,1,0,3,0,0,1,4,6,1,2,6,0,0,3,6,4,1,0,2,4,17,8,13,22,4,20,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,0,15,67,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368025914239384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664418775979544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961316007942859,0.0,0.0,0.11609859671300005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792877115157434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13927910089786893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114490904480114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726252815095549,0.09629745941647892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414215769933964,0.0,0.07042473956119358,0.0,0.15321402591098296,0.2261190301404445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987578404382373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520958064990956,0.19756184773274765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997660126588994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908971584510247,0.0,0.10396208913696202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12933928278799472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09344976862588757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898045581479525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534260363337556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092587181448128,0.0,0.0,0.1406204140112353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13489218552250068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764733198984527,0.2253890410681545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744367501521488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701204488251577,0.15719990841094725,0.15492683750679107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14032618046803835,0.0,0.11641946131282765,0.0,0.0,0.07950548804455958,0.0,0.10812428858683584,0.0,0.12119674784310618,0.0,0.1216313755719672,0.1504936231633771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17360691288867938
mentalhealth,onarolavu,2020/01/21,"18, bpd, treated alcoholic [really concerned] i’m a diagnosed alcoholic (i used to go on a 10 day benders, drinking enormous amounts of alcohol) and i haven’t drank alcohol in six months. when i stopped drinking after a month or so i felt like a new person. and yes, i should be (and i kinda am) proud of myself but i’ve started to regret this decision. 
i really can’t stand being sober all the time, i feel bad all the time and it’s just so hard and painful for me. antidepressants are fine but they don’t really fill the void from alcohol. so i filled that void with many other substances. 
i got arrested for having weed and i don’t even like weed. i got kinda hooked on benzos, i just don’t enjoy them that much, but i still take large amounts of pills really often. 
the reason i’m concerned is that i started to enjoy extasy and amphetamines really really much. and i used to take them for special ocassions only but now it’s getting worse. now i take them more often but it’s still not a daily thing. it makes me really sad when i realised that i actually feel normal, comfortable with myself and productive only when i’m on dangerous and very addictive drugs. 
now...for the last 3 days i snorted 8g of speed and ended up having amphetamine psychosis. the sadest part is that i enjoyed even the psychosis that comes on top of all the other shit it does to me. am i at the beggining of becoming a drug addict? i know it’s wrong and i know how bad it’s affecting my whole body but i really wouldn’t mind feeling like i feel on those drugs for the rest of my life. 
i thought my battle with alcohol would change my life for the better, but it only pushed me into more dangerous and addictive drugs. i sometimes regret that i’ve stopped drinking alcohol. maybe i wouldn’t try all these things... i just don’t know what to do anymore, these things are no more just vices for me, they became much more. 

if you’ve even read this thank you, please leave some comments, your thoughts on this situation, advices. i really need that right now.",3.005049751243781,5.083619330845772,4.292860696517415,84.17396766169156,75.84079601990051,7.8497512437810935,24.84825870646766,8.680891452615391,1.848957213930348,1609,55,314,34,36,529,188,402,0.152,0.727,0.12,-0.9501,0,0,15,0,0,0,47.0,0,2,5,3,22,24,4,0,17,1,21,25,2,6,4,69,50,29,0,9,14,0,6,3,0,4,19,0,0,1,28,18,11,2,12,4,0,5,10,11,0,1,6,7,49,13,34,38,17,42,0,3,0,0,9,13,1,7,26,210,77,1,0.0,0.0,0.06478631642642264,0.21712219613333952,0.0,0.0648747919103397,0.0,0.4966493124025108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584028162631386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108644759964772,0.0,0.07332169392634627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871588313829847,0.0,0.07374347350832931,0.08361491719607507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023100754589433,0.057188447296685575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563112843483459,0.0,0.0,0.06738367586441943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05809766678404948,0.0,0.0,0.19510852644692886,0.3079617408371879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058801156685598426,0.0,0.0,0.13154839040932365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427356760224754,0.04742848262379546,0.06374407665378629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0346856350811661,0.0,0.03773053209126141,0.0,0.10619507172229288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059471714228057984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094573616931265,0.05411608723507634,0.0,0.07029661383034477,0.0,0.0,0.09378535983889827,0.09730328005635934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04431532976618868,0.06730826390956858,0.06669690970083449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703420172925763,0.0,0.105982507693287,0.0,0.1464111793177393,0.0492267764074022,0.0,0.06411913669097727,0.0,0.0,0.06504735435874848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15147601409251088,0.0706428266423205,0.0,0.0,0.07189307173119264,0.0,0.0,0.0579685190965627,0.0,0.07287544352421467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640720069426513,0.0,0.3827757943986113,0.06825919051099792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669604379547843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681475955083754,0.0,0.07462428154259948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566065080973656,0.0,0.093981284224548,0.0,0.10603705737857982,0.11100874605281212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497493270373463,0.0,0.0,0.061122287751368715,0.0,0.0,0.13231817293010273,0.0,0.0,0.1054112734022698,0.07742419342846113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04507393254198569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467796619777053,0.0,0.05477807157331899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412120978525855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765630207713866,0.047161007619099284,0.07258620632387185,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i_am_meee,2020/01/21,"Been stable for years now I was diagnosed with bipolar about 3 years ago. I had the problem for about 8 years in total. It would basically involve having these “episodes” where I seemed to lose the plot. I would talk a lot more, talk a lot of nonsense at a fast pace, embarras myself on social media by posting a lot of cringeworthy sometimes nonsensical posting, I was also violent and aggressive quite often with people who I felt were getting in the way. I felt like I was on my way to achieving greatness. I felt like I was onto a good thing. This led me to be sectioned a couple of times especially when I got violent. I didn’t really suffer with any delusions of hallucinations except possibly grandiose thinking. I would say things like “my sister is the devil” but I didn’t actually believe that it was more like she was getting on my nerves and I wanted people to believe me. I wonder if I’ve been medically “institutionalised” ie believing I am mad so acting that way. When it first happened I was getting over a break up and I was feeling very low and my way of thinking was a bit random and jumbled up thoughts and speech. But nothing extreme. I have for the past 3 years been completely stable. I have been taking antipsychotics for the whole time so I guess I can thank them for that. But I literally never got depressed except when it all started and I am ok in general now. Sure I am not perfect but I don’t think you can label my problems with having mental health problems. Sometimes I wonder if these episodes weren’t anything to do with having a disorder and maybe I was just acting a bit wild for some other reason. Anyone have some insight? Does it sound like I have bipolar or could it have been something else?",4.076282271944926,6.144227746987956,5.028261617900173,80.13132530120481,72.73493975903614,7.272977624784852,29.02581755593804,8.07648339933343,2.1451347676419967,1380,57,245,21,28,450,172,332,0.124,0.777,0.099,-0.8420000000000001,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,1,5,13,23,4,0,16,1,41,5,0,2,5,60,63,21,0,10,11,1,4,5,0,3,5,3,0,0,16,13,0,0,13,0,0,3,6,12,0,1,26,7,41,11,37,32,13,41,1,4,0,0,10,14,0,14,22,191,57,1,0.0,0.0,0.08493228561440205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715007757046803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960077679652016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05918586509595095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06085595025814984,0.0,0.0716212764900224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29417135193967725,0.0,0.0,0.19003640402096933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912531239587394,0.0,0.0,0.06948928587102164,0.09630107601605332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496195342107458,0.08833732059399901,0.0,0.0,0.09974810075693907,0.0,0.07616373180341525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270544492263993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044006827456421434,0.0,0.2506978521028099,0.0,0.0,0.07403077645883405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364144665691649,0.0,0.0,0.07299969459109129,0.13921751783191666,0.09595490408658557,0.09587737544312586,0.0,0.0769635674218314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251269786115413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126012206695541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736838967653144,0.0,0.22197868532437054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743699745211847,0.0,0.0,0.08767724387434914,0.08770944657000429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712571472941767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351113248884949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308346500132434,0.12067634581770237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981173609828963,0.1667083527682328,0.0,0.0,0.2498383407230712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257099774545223,0.0,0.0,0.05575598348090457,0.08948508549443514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921265010011411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792321643103437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871984364780235,0.0,0.06700275424745186,0.1721570064732263,0.0,0.061602863956872436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202818316284499,0.0,0.06543847176404279,0.13990869884278145,0.0,0.08012888966454186,0.0,0.0,0.11564257675758165,0.16730294196566656,0.0,0.06909499469496043,0.10150004001537696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181187443424128,0.05133470050675232,0.2763330345413444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716995975093136,0.0,0.0,0.1887685571228334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185478619093154,0.0,0.0,0.22418726299868386
mentalhealth,Dosce,2020/01/21,"How to pursue therapy with frequent house moves ? I’m not set in my life, so I try different locations to find the one, also to follow career opportunities.

Problem is that each time I have to start again from scratch with a new therapist in the new town.",6.153401360544216,6.627115632653062,6.914693877551024,74.57911564625853,66.14285714285714,10.61496598639456,32.65986394557823,10.504223727775694,3.4120557823129243,202,8,38,5,3,67,40,49,0.055999999999999994,0.89,0.054000000000000006,-0.0258,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,7,5,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,1,3,1,9,5,1,12,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,6,25,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093616440455636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735256427350873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239280775542612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020824520889881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18491732844512407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782523385294963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5056968157704108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17740269153562124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505075765285283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18530363409063036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29939151454480345,0.3039703827756395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265788850629794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17774525155093013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Holy_Sassy_Melassy,2020/01/21,"How to get my apetite back when it dissapears because of feelings of guilt or shame? Some important information: I'm quite skinny but I absolutely love food. I love cooking, baking, making desserts and best of all, eat it. It's truly a source of joy for me. I'd also love for my body to be more curvy and less skinny. I've been on the skinny side for as long as I can remember, because of genetics. I don't like being too skinny, I think it makes me look ugly, and I lose the feeling of femininity. 

Now, a few years back I started working on some sides of myself that were hurtful to me and others, you know, just kind of paying more attention to my surroundings and working on being less impulsive with words. I wanted to grow as a person, and try to never ever inflict pain or uncomfortableness on others. Which is tricky when you already never intend to do so, but sometimes still end up doing so. 


So what I did is similar to the Pavlov Conditioning. Every time I got in a small argument with my friend and would end up hurting his feelings, I took away something that brought me joy. Like eating a cookie or some icecream, or making crème brulée. Like a punishment really. I figured I didn't deserve that since I just hurt my friends feelings. 


It seemed to work really, all these different instances in which I would end up hurting my friend in some way, started happening less and less. But taking away food kind of transformed itself in me just losing my apetite for the rest of the day whenever something went wrong and I ended up feeling guilty. Which I was at peace with tbh, I didn't deserve feeling happy right after I just hurt someone close to me. But every time, the next day things would be okay again, and my apetite would return again. So I never really thought of it as a big bad thing. 


But I really really hurt my friend's feelings this time. I can't completely explain all of what happened as I feel he wouldn't like me putting private things between us out on the internet, but to summon it up shortly, I'd been honest with someone, in hopes of not misleading them too long into thinking I could give them friendship. I don't like the idea of doing such a thing. But he feels the way I said it was unnecessary and flatout incredibly mean, and not my place to say that because I don't know their backstory. 


The thing is, I really, really tried my best to speak from the point of how I felt about a behavior/actions this person had displayed, what my feelings were and where they came from. I never did the ''You are this and you are that and that's why I don't feel I can like you.''-thing. I've sat about an hour in bed trying to piece the right words together.


But this person I was honest with is also very close with my friend. 


I feel horrible for having hurt his feelings that badly. I really love that friend incredibly much. As you can guess my apetite dissapeared. It's been a few days and he still hasn't spoken to me after being this dissapointed and hurt. My appetite hasn't come back yet either, I've tried to force myself to eat at least something, but after half an hour I'd feel very nauseous outta nowhere and my stomach would just throw everything out again. I feel incredibly guilty for what I did, I feel horrible for hurting my friend that badly, I feel awful for having taken away someones wish for me to like them, eventhough I really didn't feel I could, eventhough I really just didn't see them as my cup of tea. It still feels awful to take away that hope from someone. 


The thing is, before all this, my friend found out about my apetite going away after something bad would happen and I'd feel guilty. He said he was dissapointed in me, and that he wanted me to change that because he knew it probably wasn't very healthy. 


I don't want to dissapoint him even more after the big incident, so now I'm kinda stuck in a place where I constantly feel bad for not being able to keep any food inside, but also bad when I do eat some because food really does bring me happiness. I really, really don't believe I deserve any happy feelings. 


On top of that I just feel awful for having inflicted such pain on them. I thought I was doing the right thing by being honest, but the longer he stays away, the more I'm convinced I never should've been honest. It would've been softer on my friend and the other person. 


I don't know how to get out of this toxic cycle. I don't know how to gain control over my stomach again and get to keep food inside. I hate throwing up, it's the worst. I hate how much more skinnier it's making me. I feel like a stick, not a woman. I don't think it's just a stomach flu, I don't have a fever or any other flu symptoms. I think this is might be a result of taking away food for too long, whenever something bad happened. How do I regain control over my stomach's reaction to food?",4.628758522727273,5.617101207291667,5.3858522727272735,82.35573863636365,69.73958333333334,8.109848484848484,27.56628787878788,8.344100000000001,1.8065208333333331,3829,125,748,55,66,1245,324,960,0.168,0.684,0.14800000000000002,-0.9564,1,0,5,0,0,0,97.0,1,5,7,12,50,65,3,2,38,4,73,34,9,14,10,162,163,62,0,15,29,0,25,8,9,8,6,4,2,5,56,37,19,4,45,1,1,11,28,27,0,1,36,31,114,38,121,109,29,118,0,11,2,4,49,56,0,16,56,526,170,4,0.03343328145710454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036894457459124286,0.08020974930640383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682073336007108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21988167939692815,0.07712438918163032,0.19540775455308013,0.1019030902987584,0.0,0.02844926004246132,0.03766785927498298,0.0701723324393641,0.0,0.0,0.037136838705058926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03823876725912043,0.0,0.0,0.03536797868669779,0.0287998115902405,0.035054159512975566,0.036129499864293986,0.07499653608753623,0.05338750950525162,0.0,0.0,0.06468510202040012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03493066321145183,0.0,0.0,0.029257689906020068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684237423393547,0.0,0.0,0.11844785538925387,0.0,0.0,0.02208236708563044,0.030242317169437486,0.056337963186431875,0.0,0.030047677583212362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40571691989807895,0.07165422885972296,0.0321011932374896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829935965333833,0.03665786744908865,0.23247423287026625,0.0,0.05240252896059908,0.032072250047270545,0.01900090432234604,0.0,0.026739649369632072,0.0,0.03683052882648083,0.0,0.1182597615096397,0.10677104940129097,0.0,0.06601688745050295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06641358450374453,0.06585009522710816,0.0,0.3221191735506424,0.037742105252065415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059434073451130866,0.0,0.06963123557121982,0.07349622853191304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067050031731225,0.0,0.0,0.08876220601657678,0.028075536036866352,0.0748065800966108,0.0,0.0,0.12069936734998025,0.0,0.08926789994520996,0.0,0.0,0.03641864480910049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03546742820832974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04915461750728091,0.0,0.12892903878071282,0.0,0.035556674121939184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115073738393886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11677060714624585,0.06986132642290366,0.0,0.03160525756854585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03604673212796712,0.0,0.0,0.033609682198691364,0.0,0.035560410213590354,0.0,0.0,0.27843681072376697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03787339046218857,0.08565551906406288,0.06360541362024648,0.026587487328348126,0.0,0.0,0.026641996699769983,0.03043640377231252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027656355911314504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133116435340222,0.12869286734012894,0.03306637024786965,0.0,0.04732849739098775,0.03563542959362715,0.08009958527752185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03474998080876572,0.07541300049758183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554811062572115,0.08569078712390253,0.0,0.05308458188632521,0.058485645842895125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03714560586880464,0.09079601396456392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04021612106152675,0.0,0.0,0.08275787585579686,0.05915944688956101,0.05307556525898628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030992986864449595,0.03016833630076445,0.0,0.03844662369291734,0.0,0.0,0.07301948126769736,0.0,0.0,0.16625030729594076,0.03655404482889306,0.0,0.021529937105185082
mentalhealth,ricardo-5566,2020/01/21,"AMA this Saturday with therapists Johanne Schwensen and Jakob Lusensky Hey, this Saturday, January 25, between **4:00 pm** and **5:30 pm CET**, therapists and co-founders of the therapist platform It's Complicated, [Johanne Schwensen](https://www.complicated.life/find-a-therapist/berlin/heilpraktiker-for-psychotherapy-johanne-schwensen) and [Jakob Lusensky](https://www.complicated.life/find-a-therapist/berlin/jungian-psychoanalyst-jakob-lusensky), will do an AMA on r/IAmA. For more than 7 years, Johanne and Jakob have worked side by side as private practitioners in Berlin, while being on a shared mission to simplify the search for the right therapist. 

Johanne is a clinical psychologist who works with her clients using present-focused, behavioural methods and Jakob is a Jungian analyst who works a lot with his patients’ past and dreams. Together they represent two very different schools of therapy, but share the mission of making people's search for the right therapist easier.

***Start preparing your questions already now and don't forget to join in for a frutiful Q&A on everything you wanted to ask about therapy on the 25th!***",8.023203463203462,12.206278181818185,6.3172077922077925,64.6987878787879,71.1590909090909,10.170562770562775,40.1991341991342,9.957137785484203,5.7590225108225095,944,56,118,30,21,278,111,176,0.015,0.9059999999999999,0.079,0.8405,1,0,1,0,0,0,71.0,0,2,1,3,2,2,0,0,12,0,7,1,0,2,0,18,12,11,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,11,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,5,2,24,10,2,18,0,0,0,0,12,11,0,2,7,67,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11081691639512073,0.0,0.0,0.10880596011209707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387994850251907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491842545775854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025179400714843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835656939598649,0.0,0.0,0.11010628999842988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186044676701795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537422429010115,0.0,0.0,0.06703170398938788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586307395401653,0.06961918032329585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249434585967924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715177319053824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016312717743554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107840173953686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296800108929968,0.8161745107112346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980965887304872,0.0,0.0,0.08673138082049192,0.0,0.08285772661932779,0.05923082518293678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21932274677903785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646677415658122
mentalhealth,BurgundyBlak,2020/01/21,"Surface Value Alone I know to varying degrees everyone does this. Outward aesthetic is the first impression we make upon anyone. But one shouldn't necessarily  ""define"" themself by it.

So, I'll be frank. I've always had 3 friends tops if any. Currently only my partner. All of my family is toxic and unsupportive. Even with my partner I feel alone. I feel unattractive. Untalented. And impossible of being understood by others for various reasons. I'm older (30) so making meaningful platonic relationships seems more hopeless than ever. I'm not religious, nor do I desire to be. BUT, my psychology of religion class has awakened an idea in me. Community. One of the major reasons that religious people thrive. Connecting on a level built around deep and common beliefs. 

I don't subscribe to the idea of an all powerful diety. Being bipolar, having social anxiety, and ping-ponging between anorexia and binge eating  disorder further displaces me from a more meaningful existence. 

Point: Since I've been a teenager, when I liked how I looked, I've rested almost all value in myself in my skin. My ""number"" extends beyond 120 people. I'd say... at least 60 percent of which were mistakes or misguided attempts to feel complete. I'm very sex-positive but my relationship with sexuality is fractured. If that makes sense. 

Since my relationship has begun, I've moved this way of living to the web. Showing in webcam. Again I this is something I don't believe to be bad. I don't condemn myself for doing it etc. The problem lies in placing nearly all sense of SELF in the acceptance of OTHERS. It was easy when I was young, in shape, etc. I've lost those things. It was also a way to be social without hating myself.  It was a way to ""hang out"" in person, and now on webcam, I still feel it's the only way to achieve being liked. Otherwise I feel like a ghost, largely ignored but unwelcome if seen. In a way, I feel like the living dead. The compliments fed me. 

I've gotta go for now, but that's the overall scenario. I know I'm not the first, nor the last external approval seeking stray, and I do have a therapist but still. I'm curious about THIS community and whether there are people who are similar. 

Thanks.",3.418124787294385,6.164382604878052,5.080311968235963,75.62197107203632,77.82926829268294,7.813953488372092,29.290981281905843,8.70740988407696,2.943549631310268,1748,81,285,41,43,589,226,410,0.11,0.746,0.145,0.9359,2,2,1,1,0,1,71.0,1,0,0,8,17,17,1,0,22,0,31,4,1,6,5,60,57,27,2,7,14,0,7,4,3,2,1,1,0,4,19,13,2,1,18,1,0,3,9,8,0,4,11,10,31,9,47,37,13,50,1,2,2,0,13,26,0,6,20,202,50,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160828698203666,0.1895002382944024,0.0,0.07315994202107035,0.07612224582281063,0.0,0.0,0.062212444432131,0.0,0.06998522031201113,0.0,0.0,0.06396793250655188,0.0,0.0,0.08144040093884272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638554869590175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307145045754088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591952224298604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484890548598594,0.0,0.08005850594364057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361125285471723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20405829979467005,0.06042450112272321,0.08275276471368634,0.0,0.0874171456602669,0.0,0.0,0.08624323299760851,0.0,0.27754319075967604,0.13071276931477224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556329559176388,0.0,0.0,0.07068052427230984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051992621991392665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032178195396852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20654922294642725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055473052824028,0.07457189473132839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17877838373287824,0.0,0.1615645825752543,0.0,0.07682375047032937,0.0,0.0998658935484082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831993927398914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723330673509084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239842253464851,0.13915582783063593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902710329472749,0.07988054060564001,0.09558159640464013,0.0,0.08648221062665272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753809637966649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18812214368419847,0.0,0.2946596243810577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275196774387355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832838484561063,0.09543805126832317,0.0,0.0,0.1513534760411711,0.0,0.0,0.18651339585957508,0.0,0.0704290647549308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461189210909906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422642952978822,0.0,0.10622029494164922,0.060778087545531864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548410825058707,0.0,0.363079798028956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818757690507263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Slipstreem123,2020/01/21,"I am overwhelmed and I don't know what to do. I have a history of depression through my teen years. I mostly overcame a lot of my problems through therapy and medication. I also struggled with alcohol for a while and stopped drinking little over a year ago. 

For the last three months I have been feeling incredibly depressed, anxious, overwhelmed by work and alone. It has now reached a point that I find myself considering drastic options: from dropping out of university to potentially killing myself. I don't want to do either of these things, but I feel for the first time in a very long time that I am completely out of control of my environment and that I cannot help myself. I am at a crisis point. I can't eat, sleep, work or anything. 

I am a graduate student, in a fairly high pressure environment at a new university. I do not live on campus and spend most of my free time working a part time job. Everyone on my course is very nice but due to my circumstances, I have no friends. I live with my partner, who is foreign, and due to visa issues will be leaving the country soon. This will leave me geographically and emotionally alone. I cannot speak to my family about my problems as they are very demanding and often not very sympathetic. They also blame my partner for my personal woes and claim she has 'ruined my opportunities' due to her visa situation. I stayed with them for a week over the holidays and only had rows and felt worse. 

I am very stressed by my university work. I am usually fine with this, but have recently been overwhelmed with a sense that I am not good enough, that I cannot meet expectations of my supervisor and effectively that I am destined now to fail. My university doesn't give me grades on individual pieces of work and there is strict limit on the academic support I am allowed to receive, so I have no idea how I am doing, but can only judge based on my own (low) opinion of myself. This is reflected by the fact that I don't really know what I'm doing with upcoming assignments and every time I look for academic advice it is no help. 

The depression paralyses me from doing anything and as a result all aspects of my life worsen. As a result of this, my depression worsens. I have tried getting counselling or seeing a doctor but waiting times are horrendous. I don't know what to do. My degree is for the next five months and I know I cannot live like this for five months, but also I want to get my degree (even if I barely pass). At the same time, I am so miserable - as a consequence of my family life, my partner having to leave, my own self-disappointment and a lack of a support system - that I feel like I don't have many options left. I want to drink again but I know I can't do that.

I know I need help or advice but I don't know who can give it to me and how I can articulate myself to get that help. My academic tutors are not particularly empathetic - nether are my family and friends - and the only person who can support me emotionally will soon be in another continent. 

I just needed to get this off my chest and see if there is any advice. Thanks.",5.6246248045857214,6.164076470297033,6.693830119854091,75.47515372589892,67.30033003300329,10.009310404724683,32.1189855827688,10.001912283498694,3.103512211221122,2455,98,471,55,38,825,249,606,0.20199999999999999,0.72,0.078,-0.9974,2,2,3,0,0,1,60.0,0,0,3,11,18,31,1,7,29,0,65,10,2,7,2,92,96,47,1,11,19,0,4,2,5,3,5,1,0,5,27,30,4,4,15,3,4,2,20,18,0,4,4,8,87,14,72,87,12,58,0,12,3,0,24,22,0,12,33,356,114,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18877001900189286,0.05707982465724404,0.0688157084914832,0.0,0.13338185644857167,0.0,0.1544833236982026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04378892294409505,0.06752086521218059,0.0,0.07274488878959481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597863365838928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751402563701922,0.0,0.07222135875526174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218437254755167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590817359006637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615973755079168,0.0,0.06588932448116958,0.0,0.14486517842614693,0.0,0.06653438434842819,0.0,0.042530459102676985,0.0,0.05425322905685806,0.061529533041996265,0.0,0.0,0.18210978456095475,0.0,0.09767593529532556,0.0460018203398038,0.06182663664814285,0.0,0.05885332956031108,0.05477199599248884,0.0,0.0,0.09949855078865608,0.0,0.1345691251421369,0.12354178459916015,0.0,0.05400914553178432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17264301160743814,0.0680339239506967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269098723190938,0.0,0.06720875609976658,0.06389935011511508,0.0,0.07124045945515432,0.0,0.2477179904173532,0.0524882598970634,0.0,0.20454621491291375,0.06996234381238702,0.0,0.09096426946723174,0.06291757976082397,0.06453792860725194,0.17057855035580602,0.056985095215146574,0.05407325367662633,0.0,0.0,0.05474396930833727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528361213476014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486839500850955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15419178545327591,0.0,0.0,0.09549204186704764,0.0,0.06219041477244752,0.0684818646799148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691957238744247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06973050762951631,0.0,0.0,0.11244961901887486,0.0,0.0,0.12174293718025438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322933110991025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041251309926102535,0.0,0.06357955652408076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262453718474387,0.0,0.06717513692107542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237956187085128,0.06443873100340257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863354707676783,0.0,0.053834785655848934,0.07376107927933606,0.06731673745053654,0.0,0.0,0.21921461075724266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059283711903647764,0.0736381242208408,0.0,0.042779334850347316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26283338063026634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04371809579597576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091894155346377,0.2656516577880644,0.11394061273941697,0.0,0.05165156098697199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343915433908467,0.0,0.06562118121498876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293296692193268
mentalhealth,Caitlin5648,2020/01/21,"Why do I get so sad over incredibly small things? Today, for some reason I felt so sad (almost feels like a hole pierced in my heart) over falling over at the swimming pool. I suddenly started to insult myself and wanted to cry the whole time I was there, it lasted for 2 hours. It was horrible.",3.0475862068965505,4.965218931034482,4.192620689655172,85.66444827586207,75.20689655172414,6.708965517241379,23.66896551724138,7.554174236665415,1.0936579310344825,230,7,45,3,5,75,46,58,0.29100000000000004,0.672,0.037000000000000005,-0.9515,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,3,0,3,1,1,1,0,7,8,3,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,2,0,2,0,3,0,0,3,2,6,1,9,5,2,14,0,2,0,0,1,6,0,2,7,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27672753102927217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035607069047685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973234020478922,0.1974265817980453,0.2653421418402213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14438299504301091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3274795416700825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721519598769569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22526451474004525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13501207795072148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28413682903966064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956040196838818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835966009325553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611436104576408,0.0,0.2619502557672433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16300011271259654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493655270250928,0.3085381668798658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rocket-kun,2020/01/21,"Help piecing life back together Long story short, my mental health took a real nose dive a couple years ago and I kinda let most things fall by the wayside while I tried to get on an even keel. Now, I'm trying to piece my life back together and strengthen my mental health so I don't regress (or at least, regress as bad). Not gonna lie, I'm nervous that it's too late to reconnect with some people and that I've lost the skills to make new connections. Any advice from people who are or were in the position of piecing their life back together is desired.",6.448958333333337,5.766076455357144,6.440000000000001,82.13833333333334,65.69642857142857,9.609523809523813,31.16666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.276245238095238,441,14,90,6,6,140,83,112,0.040999999999999995,0.893,0.066,0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,2,7,3,0,1,6,0,5,6,1,1,0,13,12,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,3,1,7,0,12,7,6,16,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,5,10,55,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16174535643457147,0.14672451642306936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256006097145578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3818266522258595,0.1382032501219032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831460091089439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932516143073774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647797155351697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35188249407197625,0.0,0.0,0.11094534077510056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867150717857783,0.0,0.0,0.16925659480120575,0.35073745923806504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146481013019437,0.0,0.0,0.18068589282069936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048665587172947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336127853394419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15986136237157186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22950305484311204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18839931092837836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996490014657358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839000928796348,0.2247559975217231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659019662568893
mentalhealth,MayorMoonay,2020/01/21,"I just wish people would stop trying. Don't get me wrong I understand that they only mean well and I am thankful that I have people that try to support me.

But I am so scared of disappointing them.",0.939,3.4322049000000057,2.575000000000003,90.85000000000002,87.5,5.2,18.0,6.742157984588678,0.11109999999999998,156,4,32,2,5,51,31,40,0.191,0.529,0.28,0.5186,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,2,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,11,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,9,3,2,10,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,24,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369423209356319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855160148418689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19934743290093207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3634299050664449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624191081088504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21913675925283346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974407643495734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413168427212369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3559126953594249,0.0,0.0,0.2728670771246204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356695110681104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014150262445711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18619632668998687,0.2865775280932084,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FinnJ835,2020/01/21,"What's going on with me..? I don't know if this is the right place for this.. but I need to know what the hell is going on.. for the past few weeks this has all been getting worse.. I haven't been sleeping properly, I forget so much, I can't focus on anything, I've been spacing out for hours at a time, I feel the strong urge to rip out my teeth, I pulled half of my right eyebrow out, and I think I'm dead, or maybe Ive never existed? Or I'm a character in a simulation game like the Sims? I should probably go see a therapist but I have no way to do that.. I'm not depressed, I don't really feel anything, I just kinda think I'm dead.. or I'm going crazy.. some time this week I relapsed on a year and a half clean from self harm. Its not bad, I think I was just trying to feel.. Im kinda foggy or dazed.. nothing feels real. What if nothing is real? Or I'm not real? What if I died? How will I ever know if I'm dead? Am I in a coma? How do I wake up if I'm in a coma? Do I want to wake up..? Someone please help me..",-0.5778142292490109,0.8748749260869602,2.44205533596838,96.17494071146244,84.52173913043478,5.399209486166008,17.845849802371546,6.351523495107088,-0.3660434782608689,763,17,196,7,22,272,114,230,0.147,0.738,0.115,-0.9106,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,1,0,13,0,20,6,4,2,3,48,46,17,4,8,17,0,4,1,0,2,2,0,1,1,10,6,0,0,10,1,0,5,9,5,0,2,4,5,25,2,24,40,4,32,1,1,1,0,3,17,1,13,10,122,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087446499057385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058998237551452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924062994962404,0.0,0.13163209090779726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11472724027052207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565212529305496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626473645259444,0.0,0.2883272870043168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501313843324453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490444522868742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700084393488127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091114436399556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061963943611618326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742027450805152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323646699371482,0.09404467749874147,0.09782102824442684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24339837222874916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107595441330354,0.0,0.0,0.13251294762290394,0.1392239769488939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13674686614264328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4330893912836581,0.08125213499575762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166284913752154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106906622055704,0.0,0.13231393871485264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692407780075698,0.0,0.10746474947952303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726228593738847,0.0,0.24380739746860264,0.0,0.0,0.14791407914504265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611092902832579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480908335102615,0.10067371977229272,0.2034747315211657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12925313363897584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167595933330199
mentalhealth,_Denis_S,2020/01/21,"Help for People with burnout/depression Hello everyone, I'm about to start my own small business as a coach for people with burnout. I’m going to help overworked people in high-paying jobs deal with burnout and avoid burnout without having to rely on medication.  
I’d like to find one or two more test clients to really perfect my method and would be interested what you think about it.  


If you're interested, or have any recommendations, send me a message / Comment below!",8.03639534883721,8.528112639534887,7.583116279069767,71.33048837209303,62.139534883720934,10.135813953488373,36.967441860465115,9.888512548439397,3.7061888372093015,381,17,64,7,5,120,64,86,0.024,0.782,0.19399999999999998,0.937,1,1,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,4,2,5,0,1,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,14,9,6,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,2,1,0,2,1,1,0,2,0,0,4,4,17,7,2,7,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,3,2,38,6,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603517953879257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430990055899056,0.2030938264967205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22531659673979906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21551653763216788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340103312021554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161029663572069,0.2491351949146524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23399469149222554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151997605535036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23754326218134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15978389304232207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4904212014478083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15105924430247486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16690015125247226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109084505444356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23034191956743005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22730237361217906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750525106765266,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,azlolazlo,2020/01/21,"Felt nothing for years now have an overwhelming urge to die? Basically for the past 4 years I've felt nearly nothing, went to get help but it only made things worse and now I've woke up today and wanted to die. How can I make it through the day? (If anyone responds: sorry I can't answer immediately, I'm  at work)",1.2454910714285743,3.5637645312500013,3.2788392857142874,87.83937500000002,83.375,5.5321428571428575,20.080357142857142,6.868970318607317,0.3735294642857139,246,7,51,3,7,83,48,64,0.204,0.769,0.027000000000000003,-0.9171,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,3,0,3,0,0,3,0,11,12,5,2,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,5,2,2,0,9,7,0,11,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,7,27,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528099645312045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339975805440024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312749530492244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3989928523302797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855377630683463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926709297676645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19660157376602194,0.13869131653912126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3987311180399756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580221255972512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983445913335957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23258691831191056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13803636877314207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19694625021183845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255098163132723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192609354733268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15126255531550026,0.0,0.21174030875442254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676003646511523
mentalhealth,akimheart,2020/01/21,"mind clogged Is it possible to have too many random thoughts running through your head that it makes your mind feel blank? i feel like this and have done for almost a year and have extreme trouble concentrating, it makes me feel stupid, can someone please suggest something for me to do about this, thankyou",13.643454545454546,9.74298398181818,9.938636363636368,72.78795454545455,54.63636363636363,12.454545454545455,49.31818181818181,8.841846274778883,4.640454545454546,249,12,44,2,2,69,41,55,0.102,0.818,0.08,-0.3182,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,7,1,1,2,0,12,13,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,3,5,1,6,11,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,28,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23685976435686704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420616481511751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3588038644095621,0.16898359721758305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427573824314099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155610677759277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157834036215567,0.2398135451249465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4776741703786172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596489264316069,0.0,0.2666623212893762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20041883189303208,0.18209937366254372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18778564252300992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15232344040817122
mentalhealth,Stillgelegt,2020/01/21,"I am fault Well for context, since 7th grade till now (10th) I always said to myself, that I deserve this shit and that it's my fault (in bad situations only). I never thought anything about it till now. 
At the beginning of 10th grade I started uncontrollable to degrade myself every time I'm alone with my thoughts, to an extend that it happens multiple times a day. 
My friends and family want to help me, but I don't want to be a weight to them.",3.449614767255216,4.99511611235955,4.4831781701444635,85.5659550561798,73.26966292134831,7.3329052969502415,27.32102728731942,7.957251820313856,1.6237499197431782,350,13,71,5,7,114,63,89,0.156,0.737,0.107,-0.657,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,4,8,1,1,4,0,3,2,1,0,1,9,12,5,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,7,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,3,2,13,2,14,8,0,12,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,10,48,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308601998001657,0.0,0.0,0.18547308476298088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18343010955435168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18611462647751253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375394228177796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780532275316866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21013303392588145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722142420753663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971123148837898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494071278321239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191647245279912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952771408355008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21203171996597936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22880664287422275,0.1843875977877674,0.2505522199174956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577718331513558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35392003794625404,0.2599529688972436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629478333636013,0.0,0.0,0.2714357046158919,0.20041649350167207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DongDongExtreme,2020/01/21,"When I get too sad, I become a different person. What's wrong with me? I should preface this by saying that I'm formally diagnosed with MDD and GAD, and my doctor theorizes I have BPD, although I'm not sure about that. I have some symptoms that might indicate ADD/ADHD (for those who don't know, ADD/ADHD and BPD can be easily mistaken for each other). I currently can't see anyone to get a diagnosis, so I'm confused if this is a BPD thing, or something else.

Whenever I get too sad, I feel myself become someone else. It has to be the full-on, silently crying, “I want to die” kind of sad, but if I get stuck in that feeling for too long, I change. I become agitated, impulsive, and full-on misanthropic. It's like something snaps inside me and there's a very sudden change. I have to avoid people in that state because otherwise I intentionally start very aggressive arguments, I have elaborate violent thoughts/urges, and I become incredibly bitter. I say things I don't mean, and have really messed up thoughts I usually wouldn't entertain. I have on occasion watched (and enjoyed) snuff videos in this state. I can't talk to anyone when I'm like this because I'll have nothing positive to say at all. I can barely contain myself, it's an effort not to just explode. I've acted violently in the past because of this, and whenever someone provokes me (intentionally or not) I fly off the handle.

Needless to say, I absolutely hate who I am when this mood strikes. It's always because I'm in pain, but that's no excuse. I guess I just want to know if anyone else knows what this is like or what this is. It's out of character for me and I'm not like this often. I'm usually a fairly sensitive, empathetic and agreeable person, but I feel like this other side of me is starting to affect my usual self. I don't know what to do.",5.20563772130555,5.7683871357340735,6.613298807659882,75.6041900517885,68.22437673130193,9.934770564856077,31.48512585812357,9.971965246562196,3.084105287245574,1440,57,274,33,23,492,170,361,0.207,0.7090000000000001,0.084,-0.9931,2,2,2,0,0,1,54.0,0,0,0,1,12,23,5,2,9,0,26,4,0,4,2,56,54,25,1,7,15,0,3,5,0,3,4,4,0,3,32,15,0,2,9,2,0,1,11,13,0,0,2,10,38,9,33,47,3,26,0,3,2,0,11,11,0,11,17,178,70,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035467056342972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046362362270933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17763843951306005,0.08676845977267801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064895940219798,0.3741059807414246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199684731132217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17916825532432465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302106979585224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595217457245218,0.08788831245552642,0.08847644419203493,0.0,0.08667735696987261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122270989997544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845587200788625,0.06049805336220219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697495563473575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328864466595467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08360762323475374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818504376435239,0.1861597909740511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20686089537729668,0.0,0.0,0.0749424110983086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224537694851276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983602497076278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125629564218856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010942917494284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084017536256552,0.05870901603502671,0.14788508371432446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05425054771171118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.269375513951515,0.0,0.0,0.06748194616009426,0.0,0.0883435696249622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350445115738444,0.13038730156602285,0.0,0.0,0.11987911975097462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981338659204132,0.08801879079962813,0.0,0.06806555160535578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125201769607566,0.0,0.0,0.06722939982976278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798013999532947,0.1397458452722468,0.09989728259610957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258833385781216,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adale_50,2020/01/21,"How to get beyond instant gratification (alcohol)? I'm an alcoholic. I mean that in the medical and social definition. I drink about 20 alcoholic drinks per night, every night and never ""feel"" drunk. I black out most nights (15 drinks deep) and remember nothing for 8+ hours per night (until I wake up). I'm a 27 year old man in the US. I hate blacking out and don't want to do it but drinking is the easiest, most fun time I can have on an average night. I go from sober to blacked out without even knowing it happened.

I drink with a few women that I'm interested in but they have little to no interest in me. I know this to be fact.

I know I'm drinking to forget about daily issues, hoping that time spent with these women leads to something, and for a feeling of mild euphoria. But I know the daily issues will still be there in the morning, these women aren't interested (but they're still my friends), and the pain in the morning is less than the euphoria of last night. Plus I lose several hours of memory per night.

What is the best or easiest advice to dump this instant and foolish gratification schedule? I enjoy drinking with friends. I don't enjoy losing control, going way too far, and not remembering what time I walked home.

Thanks in advance.",4.458023679417121,5.873300303278692,5.558961748633879,79.35152094717671,70.55737704918033,8.536976320582879,29.539162112932605,8.998388855275968,2.46521839708561,990,39,187,19,18,328,135,244,0.078,0.667,0.255,0.9952,0,0,11,0,0,0,36.0,1,0,1,6,9,16,2,0,14,0,13,14,1,3,2,41,33,16,0,2,7,0,2,0,2,1,5,0,1,4,11,15,11,1,9,8,1,5,7,5,0,0,1,5,19,11,36,29,5,42,0,2,3,0,9,16,0,4,20,120,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783887199156987,0.0,0.2553839554257625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359400466540301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934092069702597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5462275365182879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052612003420989914,0.0,0.06711357302417419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08055288296637267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308397804590873,0.0,0.04161694595892626,0.0,0.09054062359643376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043949311438802,0.0,0.0,0.07864375895302275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990141214227238,0.07911633117866569,0.15689012966438587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16628023211810716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510730674643485,0.06493023041672949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983618781238648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822926467500486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676868099575427,0.0,0.08024498893516564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061435578922241676,0.0,0.0,0.5232619882385424,0.0,0.07643203192078699,0.0,0.0835855194739708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475954647737156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804693256691475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899885498206812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811992092503532,0.0,0.0613230415969472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722668840404466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733364962262393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13934407426672646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581629952365152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04698314285583445,0.06322718506916437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767854928317096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0512958198837657
mentalhealth,lemonrose6,2020/01/21,"Me [22M] with my girlfriend [22F] of 5 years, humiliated, violated, and embarrassed by housing community security guard [50M]. Have I failed as a partner? Me [22M] with my girlfriend [22F] of 5 years, humiliated, violated, and embarrassed by housing community security guard [50M]. Have I failed as a partner?


Throwaway for obvious reasons. 


But basically me and my GF were having a picnic by a pond in a gated community that belonged to our friend, Joe. We were sitting and eating a small bag of trail mix and the area wasn't messy or anything at all. 


Then this old guy comes up from behind us and tells us he's with the community's security authority and says we can't be eating on the premises. We told him we didn't know (really didn't). He then puts his hand on my shoulder and said it's still food and that it's against the rules. He then ""asked"" me to dispose the remainder of the food in the bag into the pond, which I did. He then asked who we're here with and we gave him the name of our friend and house number, which he called and confirmed that we were his guests. He then proceeds to make small talk about where we're from and such, which I went along with. Eventually he left.


The whole experience had me and my gf shaken up. I know that as I write this, what the security guard did really wasn't too bad. He basically told us that we couldn't eat by the pond, made sure we were guests and not trespassing, and moved on.


But I think there is more to it. For one, it was the fact he put his hand on my shoulder as he was talking to me. I know this doesn't constitute assault or battery, but it's extremely passive aggressive, like he was trying to get me to react or gauge my willingness to fight back. I understand people are not allowed you touch you physically uninvited AT ALL, but this kind of stuff doesn't go through your head during the heat of the moment. Then there's the fact he ""asked"" me to dispose of the food. Had he grabbed the bag and disposed of it, that would've been theft and destruction of property, but since he ""asked"" me to do it and I complied, there was no wrong doing. Again, this is the security guard being passive aggressive, and taking advantage of the fact we were naive and kind enough to be compliant with him. And perhaps the last point is that he felt the need to be a ""part"" of our world and time, by asking us where we're from and making small talk, even though we really didn't want anything to do with this guy. All in all this guy knew what he was doing, he probably knew we were authorized to be there but wanted to make us go through his BS because he had nothing better to do that day or just gets his kick out of making other people miserable. 


I keep looking back at the event and thinking about how this security guard put unnecessary stress on me and my GF. Normally if I was alone and this happened, I wouldn't care and I would've moved on by now. But because it happened in front of her, the stress has been exasperated ten fold, because now we can't think about visiting our friend or being on someone's property without having to remember this guy. We can't even watch an episode of the Simpsons, where Bort gets detained by security for stealing a video game, without thinking about this event. The experience has stressed her out as well, understandably, but we choose not to talk about, because a part of us knows that he had every right to do what he did, but another part knows he absolutely did not. 


Which brings me here today. I feel like I've failed as a partner in shielding her from such kinds of people. It's one thing to go through TSA and get your bags checked, it's another for some old jerk to come up and treat you like a criminal and essentially provoke you into an altercation. Looking back I should have just held on to the food, threw it in my bag or whatever, instead of complying with him like a coward. I should've known that he had no right to imply that I was supposed to throw it away or do anything for him. And when he tried to make small talk, I should've told him to get lost.


But my post here is not really about him. My post here is about me and my GF and how we can move on from this. Moreso how I can move on from this. I essentially allowed this guy to ruin our trip because of my naiveness and wanting to be compliant with authority and generally polite to people. I allowed this jerk to get off to harassing me and my GF. And I can't get it out of my head. I can't think about visiting a friend or taking a trip anywhere without thinking about this or having it come up in some way.


I know the security guard is not the problem here. I am. And I need help. How can I get over this? How can we get over this? 


**TLDR:Me [22M] with my girlfriend [22F] of 5 years, humiliated, violated, and embarrassed by housing community security guard [50M]. Have I failed as a partner?**",5.612864713329717,5.598078790721651,6.350347259902335,79.84384246699223,67.27835051546393,9.776089708808104,31.34744076686561,9.549672527348893,2.5851580756013752,3817,139,795,72,57,1258,315,970,0.128,0.7859999999999999,0.085,-0.9946,3,1,0,0,1,0,125.0,27,6,0,7,44,55,11,7,46,0,74,13,6,17,9,177,141,80,0,11,31,0,6,4,18,2,0,2,1,9,54,75,7,18,22,2,1,22,25,28,1,3,42,11,106,26,139,89,12,99,0,7,3,0,121,46,0,12,31,543,160,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04884604560657696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890782297879848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643196408043012,0.0,0.22045248990900645,0.0,0.04431064783114088,0.10879497374744768,0.0393786522789152,0.1437488731058609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04171132952319093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04815810579576394,0.0,0.048085232298739664,0.0,0.0,0.12187875116311245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030415860451039594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477679502840154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048731389093267435,0.0,0.062300669680632935,0.0,0.03973637451713146,0.0,0.0,0.09226779668011197,0.0,0.0,0.02384673756554053,0.03369284360155835,0.04528332104270675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22811595088506315,0.0,0.14575028055588454,0.0,0.22176376979045764,0.0,0.08041047360747618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334910625428596,0.08341114779217691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680450237846072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03161197723277012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21767641072213365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04192012753314471,0.0,0.14733721446012235,0.15551540190811144,0.03844366850195057,0.0,0.0,0.0512421093482159,0.0,0.0,0.09216470822289448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920911240886479,0.0,0.05148335468822677,0.0,0.0,0.04462622390527737,0.15740641407475334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20050476254839944,0.0,0.0699406764352756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046209159894246524,0.045253615753936535,0.0,0.09897805634131067,0.0,0.06391695525323693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321692079556853,0.0,0.13078594006499994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0445837329013201,0.0,0.09033712649211906,0.0,0.05084906755381529,0.045128068297531236,0.0,0.1422337809582659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085382042996885,0.0484908245641864,0.0,0.0,0.05342583020472149,0.08055290115774273,0.04486226327649462,0.03750545082549833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039013242727090426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03996056699564872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037663971021007284,0.0,0.1620731846924614,0.0,0.05398968952117538,0.0,0.0,0.04445002446039819,0.0,0.07092054360848757,0.18953684105858076,0.041222035475091984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03133261744523379,0.1813186535634232,0.046336840022511136,0.0,0.027500787457758084,0.0,0.0447044613677312,0.13519714557037502,0.0,0.06404037724295147,0.0,0.0,0.0981954888605211,0.34038351926332816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345285505089378,0.03743533524384598,0.0,0.0,0.042404681232914215,0.04372003756596243,0.0,0.05265515974150222,0.0,0.13638867503944235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700566266925008,0.05156470462484612,0.0,0.09111316019475392
mentalhealth,Cabotage105,2020/01/21,"problems with reading I""m sorry if im on the wrong subbreddit; if I am, please direct me to the correct one.

I have had this problem from middle through high school, Whenever I read or see complicated music I get lost, I feel like im in a sea of letters and cant find my bearings. Whenever I read a book I read twice as fast when I use a notecard under the line of text im using. if im reading complicated music I have to write the fingerings over the notes so I dont get lost in the lines and circles of notation. I know its probably something that a lot of people have but its started becoming more of a problem as I progress academically and my reading comprehention has become abysmal. Thanks for any help, I dont want to jump to conclusions as mental health is complex and not a check the boxes ordeal but its been on my mind lately and I want to start looking for answers",5.913089887640452,5.560900196629214,6.996943820224718,76.60170786516855,66.69662921348315,9.816629213483148,35.21573033707865,9.3871,3.147676853932584,697,31,137,12,10,236,107,178,0.102,0.812,0.086,0.3036,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,4,2,8,0,0,13,0,11,2,1,2,1,30,26,16,0,8,7,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,6,7,1,1,4,6,0,2,4,4,18,2,24,22,2,14,0,2,2,0,3,8,0,5,6,89,23,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654546767281737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21614863178397714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22937311687675144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049478957672359616,0.06990837961969036,0.0,0.0,0.08943865426179609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225149152832687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401640214034348,0.0,0.0,0.06559084567190668,0.1033902864588844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4228052923141951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377912434397065,0.0,0.11038588346801947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04780752172611295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217443391096757,0.0,0.21364287005287125,0.08319371190153738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861587951553358,0.0,0.09880671197439267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06630979006727976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678410618520724,0.0,0.0,0.1074165541253913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550536962380301,0.28090506405649995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5872951701752095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903554397697653,0.07797860009464032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753343658918414,0.0,0.1095418331654696,0.13852602763680716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009270081946152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16903241156919405,0.0,0.0,0.11543606391586055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699022583312673,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,McJamiesons,2020/01/21,"why would a therapist just ghost after a missed appointment? don't therapists acknowledge that clients are HUMAN?

Here is the story:

\- I had missed arrived late for some appointments since I had to travel back from work. she didn't mind at the time. i apologised for it, and she said it was OK. I even had less time for the session, but it was my fault so I didn't mind it.

\- I had arranged another session, and then I genuinely forgot as I had other things planned around it.

\- she texted me to say that ""You had failed to attend your session"".

\- I apologised for this and then contacted her for another appointment and since then she's ignored me.

I don't see what i did wrong. It's not NORMAL to have this - since missing appointments is HUMAN. 

is this common? why did she just ghost me for a random error?",1.954679487179484,4.568522544871797,2.9938461538461567,89.03448717948721,83.16666666666666,6.8000000000000025,22.76923076923077,7.984000788550335,1.416438461538462,631,22,124,13,18,201,84,156,0.187,0.784,0.028999999999999998,-0.9787,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,0,3,7,8,0,0,6,1,20,0,0,0,0,18,26,10,2,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,14,5,0,2,1,1,0,2,5,7,0,0,14,3,23,1,15,11,2,13,0,4,1,0,13,2,0,2,9,95,37,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621193868896512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537130296271935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327726766316095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114046996628373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19477943488709087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486952301649964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16918007237079002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642488408186749,0.1373142229696097,0.0,0.0,0.13759574306546973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4285035635636053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4009666739149768,0.11471436613611613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013706902702863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3116158820324835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570591582037485,0.0,0.0,0.12265991077937677,0.18878768798599305,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bookDJnr1,2020/01/21,"My mom is threatening to lock me up alone Summer last year I got locked up in a house for a week so I could hurt myself, it was miserable and I never want to do it again, I want to transition but due to weird laws in Sweden it takes forever and that doesn't help when my mom doesn't care enough to actually help, she tells me she wants to help in any way she can but just ""forgets"" to call the people that can give me blockers, the only thing her threats makes me think is that I want to be successful when killing myself.",5.326636085626909,4.633465532110094,5.67665137614679,86.7206039755352,67.99082568807339,9.468501529051991,27.340978593272173,8.841846274778883,1.5975125382262996,409,10,94,6,6,131,70,109,0.28300000000000003,0.675,0.040999999999999995,-0.9762,0,1,0,0,0,3,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,7,2,1,4,0,10,0,0,1,1,16,20,7,1,5,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,17,2,14,16,1,15,0,2,0,0,12,5,0,0,9,63,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.16919454353266114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17957010655183886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790481506595665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17704107019700416,0.0,0.1767731692551172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843037330628985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914860094056206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632255701606016,0.0,0.0,0.13866837687767958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34864026654627506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000580383826008,0.18560761520171545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918200456311164,0.0,0.0,0.1413284036284264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157329572797208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4061227386231858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13372187714940742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13186382801289992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020034017754877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036070181672696,0.0,0.15154236562292486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518642672747,0.11109534571288422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4090576937518804,0.13762152196893698,0.13907553181456242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165148021892786
mentalhealth,verizonbear8,2020/01/21,"Am i going crazy or am going to die? I am a 17M. 

So this all started with this incident nearly 2 months ago, where food was stuck in my throat and i thought i night choke any second. I kept on panicking and panicking and panicking. I then developed globus sensation after 1 whole week of constant extreme worrying and stressing out. I wouldn't eat for a whole week and not exercise at all.

I would smoke weed even tho i knew i had a bad throat problem and had depersonalization and when i would get high it got worse and i got some bad depersonalization after. (I have had depersonalization before all this but it was weak and its stronger then ever as i type)

I then got over the throat problem but then developed heart palpitations. I cut out sugar and some time went by and it stopped. 

I then now got stomach cramps and gas probably related to the throat problem but i don't have acid reflux. It still probably affects my stomach somehow (my globus sensation)

Going thru all this one right after the other to the end has really freaking messed me up. I feel way more stronger depersonalization all the time, i can't eat during the evenings and nights because my throat feels worse and i cannot eat comfortably, feel stomach problems once every few days, am experiencing masturbation withdrawals symptoms, reduced sugar intake... i feel like am really going crazy especially at night times. And a combination of everything i'm experiencing can kill me?

Am i going crazy? Am i going to die?",4.2706270903010015,6.870038989130435,5.138405797101452,77.12994983277595,73.96376811594203,8.159197324414716,28.006688963210696,8.950670267944501,2.54858795986622,1195,48,211,27,26,388,143,276,0.262,0.7040000000000001,0.033,-0.9963,0,0,1,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,0,10,14,2,1,10,0,22,19,9,1,6,48,44,28,3,7,5,0,4,1,0,3,4,0,0,0,10,18,6,2,6,1,0,7,5,12,0,2,14,9,30,2,23,27,11,47,0,0,0,0,0,12,0,4,28,143,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320712191147317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383254103635401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567494643948537,0.05722023879108797,0.0,0.07987360580953982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10143650224818902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06053622405663001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19483752678076985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881470513105461,0.0,0.0,0.08313799107802848,0.0,0.0,0.12399607450645002,0.08490775917382151,0.07908670132279673,0.0,0.08436129274334582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18984719509888154,0.06705835373791688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350392614979757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049041450584593915,0.0,0.3200794831786872,0.0,0.3002949405429277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123243256932444,0.0,0.09917526969072574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038495410683098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04585850395450816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749234647384888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642624778479497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09996491910559396,0.06360647153901731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20240825022612613,0.3592708295199821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026675956488132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016160648728275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643929821941573,0.0,0.07496202819118952,0.07847672273071288,0.10752393078941676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756339057204852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451963534067628,0.1642031959565723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07450697788426568,0.1505883298615016,0.0,0.0,0.08701532524840742,0.0,0.2095975258027116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953261397868749,0.19131627183923006,0.13336035043092298,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Johnfeb94,2020/01/21,"I'm depressed and anxious. I've been to therapy in the past, it helped me out of a bad place. I'm in that bad place again a few years later. I didn't and never did do any prescription drugs. Worth going again? In a nut shell what my therapist helped me do was learn the skills I needed to manage my emotions in a healthy way. For a long time this was writing and a lot of exercise/ diet. My old therapist always recommended meditation as well, but it was never something I could stick to.

If I went back, i'd imagine i'd be forking over quite a bit of money to be told similar things my old therapist told me. The only thing I think it would be worth going for is to get on some anti depressant drugs. I don't want to get on drugs. 

Since i've been to therapy before, it helped me get out of my last bout with moderate to severe depression, i'm wondering if there will be anything different form when I went a few years ago or if I will just be told the same things again. 

Thanks",4.196805608184917,4.549397615763546,5.438916256157636,83.88095111784769,70.3793103448276,9.201818870784386,27.438044713906784,9.265573868473778,2.025104130352406,768,24,166,15,13,257,110,203,0.122,0.816,0.062,-0.9158,1,0,4,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,8,7,0,0,12,0,20,5,0,0,2,26,38,10,0,7,6,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,10,6,1,0,4,1,3,4,4,5,1,0,12,0,17,2,25,17,7,33,0,3,0,0,7,11,0,7,17,108,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976564452390845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426090381473302,0.0,0.0,0.06886392722276176,0.0,0.0,0.11440104918383442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833327748747837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786682228035956,0.16910471576161218,0.0,0.0,0.08616937518365607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105555614922546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085216152920767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26165915610912105,0.0,0.0,0.10580076315479156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3523070545025988,0.0,0.0,0.11390991640724794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872093586401773,0.0,0.11510289202160465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20362813790884046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254479595708349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961666982967399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609220014722492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508699209022285,0.15620419931037638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125219518139291,0.0,0.0,0.07701688052786766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666925841145628,0.0,0.0,0.21160152630958315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077081908213483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11440104918383442,0.0,0.08376776426444464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795903269709538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932315514414474,0.23161156229573335,0.35273071459626604,0.2018286454910216,0.06488676308664665,0.0,0.0,0.059048654247046785,0.0,0.0,0.29029021500693897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059728941597258285,0.08037974079220604,0.0,0.0,0.09104973319126587,0.18774803346019314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981797899361838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193601662549169,0.0,0.0,0.13042316217210864
mentalhealth,mialeachcb,2020/01/21,"2020 plan - new me **2020 plan**

2020: new year, new decade, new chapter of my life. 2020 is my year, the year to improve myself. 

**MAIN GOAL: GET INTO SHAPE!!!**

**Short term**

​

* Become healthier (drink more water, less carbs, more fruit and veg)
* Join a gym
* Be friendlier with people (make new friends)
* Spend more time with parents
* Keep weekly journals
* Hand in all assignments in on time
* Spend more time on self care/digital detox
* Have a more positive outlook on things
* Less frivolous with my money 

**Long term**

​

* Loose weight
* Become more advance with boxing
* Stop biting my nails
* Go abroad
* Treat my family (gifts)
* Talk to people more (trust certain people more)
* Become more productive (create notes/plans)
* Aim for distinctions at the end of June
* Improve concentration
* Don’t get annoyed so easily

It takes in average 66 days to create new habits, so for the first 2 months stick with everything, and slowly it will be easier to carry on doing those things (resist biting your nails, drink water even when your not thirsty, smile even if you’re not 100% happy)

**Ways to loose weight**

**Food and drink**

​

* Cut back on sugar (low/no sugar)
* Cut back on starches
* Reduce appetite (eat less in meals)
* Drink 2,000 ml water a day
* Stick to water all day or low sugar squash/juice
* No “dirty” snacking between meals, only fruit or veg or health bars (low sugar) 
* No fizzy drinks during the week, only no sugar fizzy on weekend
* Only grilled salads, water and fruit at work

**Exercise**

​

* Run x2 a week (Tuesday and Thursday)
* Do at least 50 squats, 50 sit-ups, 30 press-ups a day
* Boxing x2 a week and football x2 a week

**Selfcare and skincare**

​

* Create a routine with skin (wash moisture etc.)
* Try to wear less makeup; which would clear up your skin, make it healthier and boost your self-esteem in the long run
* Maintain a good daily selfceare routine (brush hair, brush teeth, shower reguarly, change bed sheets regularly)

​

* Weigh myself everyday
* Keep a food and weight diary as much as possible

**Ways to become a better person**

**Make small everyday changes**

​

* Make the bed in the morning
* Put clothes away/wash basket at the end of the everyday
* Create a to do list if need to do something that day
* Make notes of things that had happened that day/week 

**Have a more positive outlook on things**

​

* Wake up and think “you’ve got this”
* Smile more
* Rather than assuming things think about it realistically
* Go into things positively, rather than assuming its going to be bad

**Remove any toxicity from your life**

​

* Any toxic relationships: GET RID OF THEM
* Stay clear of people who have a negative influence on your life (people who do the wrong things, whether it’s behaviour or actions etc.)

Removing any toxicity from your life will clear your mind up of having to always please people or do things for them. Cut them out of your life, do things for yourself and protect your physical and mental health.

**Management**

**Money wise**

​

* Stop being frivolous with your money, its not an ever-growing tree
* Don’t feel pressured to get something, just because everyone else is
* Remember you have bills to pay 
* Only buy things if an absolute necessity 
* Each week plan anything that may need to be brought (presents etc.)
* Make sure to be paid by people by said times

**Life wise**

​

* Make plans of things that need to be done (appointments, organising room etc.)
* Keep a weekly diary with picture (free prints each month)—> to then possibly create a scrapbook of the year
* Manage your times, if you have to be somewhere by a certain time plan when you’re going to get ready/leave etc. and remember its better to be early than late, so plan to get to your location 10 minutes before
* Declutter cupboards, only keep things you actually need
* Buy gifts at least a month before someones birthday/christmas
* Priories people (family first)
* Priories things (tidy room is more of a priority than playing games on your phone)

**Relationships and social life**

**Build up relationships with people you interact with on a daily basis**

​

* If you work with people, say good morning, smile at them, make that little effort with them
* People you live with, help them with any chores etc.
* People you love, show them more affection

Making that little gesture can offer an olive branch and build up stronger relationships in the long run

**Social media**

​

* Take time away from social media and spend time with people in person
* Unfollow those celebrities/models that are setting unrealistic standards 
* Buy gifts at least a month before someones birthday/Christmas be badshower regularly, change bed sheets regularly))to see things you’re posting",2.309191169191166,4.388006125763127,2.402963006963009,85.71958954558956,111.06349206349206,4.701213741213741,21.03264363264364,6.382479282647008,1.072866806586807,3743,136,592,60,185,1129,356,819,0.055,0.835,0.11,0.9935,3,0,7,0,0,0,295.0,0,21,7,15,13,25,4,1,36,0,36,50,7,11,9,95,75,35,0,12,17,1,8,0,1,4,12,2,7,3,36,36,30,8,7,13,13,13,9,9,0,2,6,21,36,17,102,55,34,121,0,2,1,1,51,44,0,13,59,327,72,7,0.0,0.0,0.02637725132226641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022491014862265582,0.3807290482186143,0.426975214439284,0.07352494647085896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02224327764562717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05079090008400894,0.041568598908827366,0.02256881010816195,0.016477156188128513,0.11940945895672207,0.06900127853561723,0.0,0.0,0.04781144203210391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027558751098705876,0.0,0.08578204652634862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459216947301414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02766093875729182,0.0,0.1323948975926232,0.0,0.02765830220158642,0.02257998568328266,0.0,0.0478808789722586,0.0,0.1808726819805136,0.035705944776235524,0.02445006240884402,0.0,0.02582819648855841,0.02429270178056368,0.0,0.05096270647700203,0.0,0.013667113033830888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04598318253444161,0.06536924552042607,0.0,0.020883208380130112,0.0,0.08473194010164763,0.0,0.06144678582702344,0.04534274043724529,0.021618254058218097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02390242233395869,0.028773796296684237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057462969807815185,0.0,0.0,0.018117550246683597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610155180572746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030490867586313083,0.028620726603790638,0.0,0.0,0.13364396220461935,0.0,0.054182055953356116,0.023867867984176682,0.07176174578465143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024395510501732973,0.0,0.16238381646523495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02723974868658889,0.0,0.0272924605646972,0.0,0.08629992860806418,0.0,0.019870062518728443,0.08016921626082707,0.0,0.15663368529236668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278716024730862,0.0,0.0,0.030013468802319313,0.0,0.0,0.2436083853765062,0.04720287496901188,0.0,0.0296706773141352,0.0,0.06094422800472784,0.02588714107172849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02717248227691616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607984708683886,0.06123914085332319,0.0,0.02571159352377577,0.02149523532969919,0.0,0.0,0.021539304622593132,0.0,0.056396093055318265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266063710312192,0.04580463759660816,0.041617824724344867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028810242040932767,0.0,0.04519635866209655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02547532998956957,0.0,0.040646192513921854,0.021725583415369343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514041983017559,0.03463929502002102,0.0,0.0,0.1260906636546093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01835150556974626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04291010095874295,0.17345383267598913,0.09874528923375152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03935613055163755,0.0,0.0,0.01920124216342936,0.029552916608695863,0.426975214439284,0.06962539317751001
mentalhealth,introverteacher,2020/01/21,"2 weeks ago, I was minutes away from hanging myself.. My dad found me with the noose around my neck before I had the guts to jump. I went through treatment and I have ongoing electric shock therapy.. I’ve been demoted as a teacher and I’m so fucking embarrassed. I have a huge, loving, and supportive family who are concerned for me. 

Idk wtf to do. I’ve never felt so lost. Can I still teach? Do I still want to? Will another district hire me? 

I still kinda want to end my life and I feel terrible.  I don’t want to terrify my family or friends, and I feel like no one would take me seriously anyways?",0.7426721763085382,3.1760667933884363,2.9642644628099184,88.17791184573004,87.67768595041322,6.863030303030302,24.59559228650137,8.021203637495839,1.7822590633608817,466,20,96,11,15,158,81,121,0.19399999999999998,0.665,0.14,-0.8385,0,0,0,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,0,1,7,10,1,1,4,0,12,5,2,0,1,18,26,9,0,4,1,1,3,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,4,0,0,3,3,6,0,1,7,3,20,4,12,17,0,13,0,1,0,2,4,3,1,2,8,64,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776655148989313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18662520640360275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584379457145155,0.0,0.0,0.16721597035123575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514459706591129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15763547457071073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33556319739094786,0.0,0.17998181281072265,0.12714735199081256,0.17088656653674975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19514343465644735,0.13750518094992145,0.16453757728752713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12571095994792286,0.08695094673609638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19428375644461948,0.0,0.16063188303470838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372674255509541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060234072063375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4263998228298798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019670603582827,0.0,0.0,0.13381713084542196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20353308697545244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3149276938828482,0.0,0.14276302887959716,0.0,0.0,0.16498717268238722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264302989313544,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway9871237,2020/01/21,"How to be a person Lately I’ve been really struggling with this so idk it’s 2 am and I can’t sleep so I’m just going to throw some shit out here and hope someone can help me. I’ve been depressed for years now, I’ve been on and off with different therapists, medications, pretty much everything and it doesn’t seem to get better long term. I’ve had ups and downs but schools starting up again and I just have no motivation to do anything. I’m not missing assignments or classes but I hate every second of being there. I know school is a means to an end but I feel like no matter if I finish or not I still won’t be happy. The thought of getting a job and having to come into work everyday and eventually start a family repulses me. It just seems so mundane, but there’s no other option. I have a girlfriend, but she doesn’t understand all this, and I don’t want to tell her much because I can’t look like a freak. I’ve got friends but I don’t care for them much,  I just hang out with them so that I don’t feel quite as empty all the time. I know I’m rambling but if anyone can tell me something I can do to find meaning in my life please do",0.9876775956284156,2.9287512377049225,2.9799180327868875,91.8059972677596,81.70491803278688,6.033879781420765,21.232240437158467,7.1686216300943375,0.5179814207650271,898,27,201,12,24,302,138,244,0.113,0.73,0.157,0.8746,2,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,4,15,13,2,1,9,0,26,4,2,2,2,53,52,26,0,4,17,0,2,2,2,1,2,0,0,1,7,16,0,0,12,0,0,4,13,6,0,1,6,3,23,7,25,42,7,26,0,2,1,0,10,9,1,9,15,137,30,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914135299951854,0.0,0.10491032450878872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771443715348264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275123160203968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998073246595265,0.0,0.0,0.1098181194162056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980372376235456,0.0,0.0,0.13319600136350904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11291498111864827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741266743165012,0.0,0.11457642473366275,0.0,0.12018269428470466,0.0,0.12892176111099082,0.09107620533022004,0.0,0.0,0.11652012654734133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849556359670808,0.0,0.13321261182732586,0.0,0.07245337606980745,0.0,0.10196240341436204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571148797975688,0.0,0.1258662822638451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545134876098284,0.0,0.0,0.12662261575978545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651043564283135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012622228913274,0.0,0.14381004742183168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004731141631163,0.12456668824948805,0.0,0.0,0.11282132303112602,0.10705634512606982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27773980896301936,0.0,0.12842898867036515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28115119633812546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131607961833692,0.0,0.13994162348791345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296993524531484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13559732372168315,0.0,0.0,0.0816709587841993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25804579042757964,0.0,0.23211739518465055,0.0,0.0,0.13086280770381714,0.0,0.0,0.1275783230475035,0.0,0.10801868930526792,0.09814514674367818,0.0,0.0,0.1804708534980268,0.0,0.10181068712472993,0.0,0.0,0.1332763129136582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228572103593801,0.0,0.0,0.1480213668956193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120984532286527,0.07433825992442115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271768645773355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519469566386644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281151126561256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820969677746724
mentalhealth,M4ttius88,2020/01/21,"Had an uncanny moment when doing eye contact meditation with a girl with ASPD. So I dated a girl a few months ago, who for all intents and purposes was an awesome dating experience for me; she was a beautiful, smart, inspiring Philipino girl who expressed after our second date that she didnt want to exclusively date me, but rather a fwb type ordeal. She relatively early on(a month of hanging out all throughout the week) expressed that she loved me(and often), and would pay for a grand majority of our dates  She had no qualms about buying me clothes(she would propose it if we walked past clothes sections whenever we went to Target); she spoiled me with affection, sex and financial security. Things didn't settle well for me, because I liked her to the point of wanting to be her exlusive boyfriend, an idea that she frequently taunted me with, via vocally pondering whether she should(literally asking herself out loud, in front of me), but ultimately deciding each time that she didn't want to commit. That didnt stop us from looking like a couple in every way shape and form. She called me ""babe"" always told me she loved me and would try to make me feel special compared to a gym trainer she was also dating(I didn't buy that I was any more special to her than he might have been). Though she was always vague about it, she spoke about the other guy she dated  as though they didn't sleep together, or like she was being exclusive to me; I assumed they did though, rather than disillusion myself. 

I decided to be grateful for what was otherwise an opportunity that most people would be happy to be in, but i couldnt help but feel...off with her. I felt so strongly in my gut that she was using me, but i kept rationalizing things with, ""well, how could she; she spoils me rotten and asks for nothing in return other than sex and dates which she funds"". She encouraged me to go to school to better myself, but at the same time, she had little emotional support for me; if I was going through a depression episode(I'm diagnosed with major depression) she had little compassion or empathy for me not being able to willpower through it during low points. She expressed that she has Antisocial Personality Disorder, as a means of apparently trying to relate to me.

One day I ask if she'd be up for doing a meditative practice with me(I regularly practice meditation; I was curious about an eye contact variation of it and did it with two other people), where I set a 5 minute timer and we sit in front of each other and maintain eye contact with one another. She had no problem maintaining eye contact with me, which i found surprising, because my prior ""eye contact"" participants could hardly do so without frequent bouts of laughter or noticeable nervous unease. At one point, I noticed a moment that really stood out to me, which I found uncanny. For only a few seconds, the muscles around her eyes seemed to fully relax and those eyes which once illusively held emotional expression now appeared as mere fleshy pinholes pointed at me. Sort of like her face was merely a mask that for a brief moment, faltered and I happened to spot it. 

Ive read amateur Psychologists online speak of Socio/Psychopaths with shark eyes and I tend to be real skeptical of Psuedo psychology, but this moment stunted my skepticism. Am I reading way too into this, or can someone provide an explanation that will satisfy my curiosity?",13.403356643356645,8.936939871794877,12.15066433566434,58.46706293706296,55.73076923076921,15.191608391608392,47.75466200466201,12.563389971838223,5.874339102564104,2736,121,452,60,22,882,316,624,0.075,0.759,0.166,0.9967,2,0,0,0,0,0,78.0,6,0,2,3,22,31,2,2,27,0,51,16,11,5,3,95,80,40,0,16,19,0,3,4,0,6,1,3,0,6,34,35,0,4,12,4,4,9,11,9,2,6,34,16,88,22,85,28,13,66,0,3,9,4,71,25,0,14,32,348,122,5,0.08314164780136442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370005429593743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648834570850114,0.13836102261854946,0.0,0.0,0.05653917155351412,0.08718126697354593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401369359616525,0.23317865219045186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136475361367356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353203104596394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489691819868965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276368094386984,0.09199465191279484,0.0,0.05361948469496912,0.0,0.1432195588453305,0.08438702240044763,0.0,0.0,0.09528753143492724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18704632643335772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005042414251568,0.0,0.0,0.0813284851811366,0.0,0.0,0.08407783051074212,0.0,0.07982902024078027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823210508673283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450262889108174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823233028345974,0.07352188457123808,0.08850583009721129,0.07447858574610858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055728093970535526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385680033158816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624752378756024,0.16665954638310745,0.0,0.0,0.06981804439407285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15007716641477178,0.0,0.05549769551288649,0.0,0.0,0.09056562826493944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820014955159322,0.0,0.0,0.13272574011492122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797766534080504,0.18931463416196934,0.0,0.08854314145860867,0.16901679681888584,0.06323296965907453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936811049994481,0.11527990015144755,0.07259607993729862,0.0,0.0,0.31438292371113463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955532842110644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632829422406156,0.09463339722110373,0.05326266854511898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414378629571367,0.0,0.07568903357645118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320169170508057,0.0,0.07044564837725112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695101403984899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943481566518862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104712328794639,0.0,0.24505874049491325,0.0,0.0969611268807921,0.0,0.0,0.07944540743124541,0.0,0.1128954425920612,0.0,0.08121730894800644,0.0,0.10000916534395317,0.07180768916377088,0.0,0.0,0.14711729399718276,0.13198794019912927,0.06669121483936873,0.0,0.1495086525678463,0.07707314047239038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014558156389467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23624576459071164,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ECombs64,2020/01/21,"Emotional changes upon full brain development From the time I was about 16 until 25 I experienced nearly daily emotional swings- from elation to extreme depression.  Now that I’m 25 nearly 26, I feel almost nothing at all. I don’t have extreme highs or lows.  I miss feeling giddy/ excited/ joyful, even though those feelings were sometimes unwarranted.  And also kind of miss some of the depression;  at least I was feeling something.   I think that this change I have experienced is perhaps a hardening of the mind due to the struggle and constant rejection that comes with figuring life out.  I know that significant emotional change at this stage in life is a pretty normal experience, but I want to gather some info about what others experienced during these times in their life.  What significant changes did you notice from youth to adulthood in terms of your overall emotional state?  If you did experience a sort of numbing/ leveling out of emotions around 25, did you ever shift back to feeling like you may have in younger years?   Is this question a hopeless shot in the dark that lacks context and is open to endless interpretation? Yes",8.710633333333334,9.647669330000006,8.079,66.82533333333336,60.7,10.866666666666667,39.66666666666667,10.686352973137794,4.621166666666666,926,46,141,21,12,291,123,200,0.08,0.78,0.139,0.7987,0,0,1,0,0,1,19.0,0,5,1,0,9,13,0,1,9,1,15,5,1,0,2,34,27,9,0,4,3,0,5,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,13,9,0,0,11,0,0,1,1,9,0,0,6,8,16,4,33,20,7,33,0,7,0,0,8,19,0,8,12,104,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523012713485054,0.0,0.0,0.08403857613411264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355031108035124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808059357881562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731260044436732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4446753062225702,0.09052372734873863,0.0,0.1135624441400843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18102372185172927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5910474526427415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940941856549405,0.0950578188771191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055918227754347,0.0,0.0,0.2656774313330748,0.07507465637818912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11103089888464596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943264271112298,0.057753438177335685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226795990626189,0.05134053006815547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610859513108953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029636097686009,0.1008344588772037,0.11964301507871733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691194568975827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772224700981758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090162672295415,0.10393439815922068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986045541825966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733593920916149,0.10324810762426263,0.0,0.12255493735917912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06198343374055945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767301759035535
mentalhealth,k1500carpenter,2020/01/21,"I feel like I'm rotting from the inside Hi first time posting hoping to find a little clarity, I'm typically not the type to reach out for help and when I do my girlfriend and close friends usually give me the clarity needed, but with this current situation I believe multiple points of view would help.

I (18m) live with my girlfriend of 8 months and have a wonderful relationship as a whole as well as living together comes easy. I work as a carpenter making 18 an hour, not good but not bad for fresh out of highschool. I've typically always dealt with suicidal thoughts, and nihilism but was never medicated nor have I seen anyone, I personally dont like the idea of meds as i self medicated for a while (I understand its different) and always found the same conclusion being strength in myself and self sufficiency. As of recent I havnt had any major depressive episodes or anything of the like but life has gotten stressful. I found myself 2k in debt, a major medical situation arose with my girlfriend which also effects me personally. 

Now that the info is over here's my main issues I'm seeking advice on:

1. I have a terrible desire to invade my girlfriends privacy, earlier in our relationship that showed as checking her phone, but after being blatantly told that was totally uncool I stopped and was proud of myself. To be honest until i met her i never saw stuff like that as toxic as I've never understood the concept of privacy nor have i ever had any growing up which always gave me the mindset of privacy = hiding something. For about 4 months now I've switched my views and have respected my girlfriends privacy although I dont understand it. Now the issue with it is I dont think shes cheated bor am I doing it out of curiosity its simply I liked knowing what was going on and understanding her from her personal point of view. I still will find myself up late at night fighting the extreme urges to check her phone, I always prevail but it leaves me unfulfilled in a sense, almost empty like I'm missing something (I'm very much the type that likes to know everything and figure people out, how they think etc.) because of that I end up hating myself for dealing with these temptations because they arnt anxiety or self esteem moreso I'm just fucked up and awful and I deeply feel the need to invade privacy for my own selfish gain.

My second issue as of late is the more pressing one, I feel like a complete failure, my own confidence ive always rellied on tells me ""thats ridiculous you're 18 with a house, a dog, a cat, food on the table, a vehicle you own, a wonderful girlfriend, good musical talent, good looks, good ethic, and good maturity for your age"" but for some reason I feel like I'm always failing, not being good enough to my girlfriend after 1 slip up, being a employee for working 40 hours instead of 50, being a bad man of the house for coming in a little short on cash and we have to eat ramen, etc. This has been rotting me out from the inside I only sleep 3 hour nights, those 3 hours I have hellish nightmares, I lay in bed despising myself, my psychosis relapsed and I find myself crying wanting the hell to end wondering why I'm so fucked up yet doing so well. For example here's the dream I had last night taken from my dream journal:

""Last night I fell asleep at 3 woke up at 7 those 4 hours were spent in nightmares of me wading through rivers and oceans of my deceased offspring, they all called out asking why I created them with my fucked up genes and why I'd create atrocities, they all were spiting me for having part of me in them, and I tried to help them, and my girlfriend but I failed everytime, they all despised me and I was trying my hardest, every moment of existing there was pain and I felt it I wanted nothing else but to die yet I wanted to help my children,  and my girlfriend.  They castrated me saying it would rid the world of my weed, and that anything that sprouted from it would have myself in them and would suffer eternallybecause of it. I was paralyzed all I could do was stand and watch as these thousands of babies were tormented internally the same way I was, they were throwing themselves off cliffs, gouging at each other, anything to die but they all failed""

I'm honestly looking for clarity or really just other people opinions on this.

I should disclaim:
-This is not making me suicidal
-I want to see a doc but I have little money and no insurance 
-My mind is typically dark and extreme dreams, thoughts, or episodes of psychosis in which I witness such as above are not uncommon yet I felt like that one had meaning

Thank you reddit",7.196341058457283,7.023867934463282,7.493877551020411,73.50421307506056,64.00564971751412,10.297936123601984,34.89738268188631,9.858887515219184,3.4061813674622403,3682,149,652,68,49,1203,396,885,0.165,0.693,0.142,-0.9899,5,0,2,0,2,0,77.0,2,3,12,11,23,51,12,1,40,1,59,12,2,5,11,135,122,64,4,14,23,0,7,10,10,6,5,1,1,8,35,46,2,1,31,4,6,6,15,24,2,5,34,17,112,27,117,75,23,94,2,6,9,3,60,44,4,11,51,465,147,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04908685754437698,0.0,0.0,0.05030083852726133,0.0,0.0,0.04017110843899164,0.2507860099741752,0.0,0.0,0.06831997900758623,0.0,0.038427912825174604,0.0,0.0,0.035123903632929616,0.0,0.12401180835226852,0.0,0.046960836133436316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388448856209339,0.061242830843750665,0.0,0.0,0.05659510244146381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05129324952748394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654212469817901,0.05266807795349985,0.0,0.0,0.040106759817262055,0.0,0.055178312199167766,0.0,0.05178775491252791,0.04326539010448492,0.0,0.1042673182317084,0.05248252756729778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17661721088548502,0.0,0.0,0.05140063927953472,0.04196301315186654,0.0,0.08898260531331381,0.051903854175297394,0.11204557934951777,0.0,0.04543839419640945,0.04232325461613281,0.0,0.045145952641895866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015967418281047,0.1076588502966352,0.096462626479841,0.0,0.13773545807076834,0.04272794767283773,0.0607416352688857,0.11015522535652307,0.03880969457643918,0.13931809136417486,0.0,0.04818782675444035,0.02854842688970708,0.25279706196428103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049594436477695084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467980182893713,0.0,0.0,0.049892450630855935,0.2473456785765281,0.11592368789139128,0.0,0.05670665533455953,0.0,0.15728980631897094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05521320646946605,0.08189278413836104,0.1133294498484612,0.053189224463504665,0.0,0.0,0.035480873715345286,0.2454118210417917,0.15103922286247295,0.0887128691909262,0.0,0.08436570958311662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706149538857464,0.0,0.0,0.05471818609875747,0.05579725610424613,0.15181261905762908,0.0,0.0,0.05072075322311225,0.0,0.0801905964419297,0.0,0.03692684780660117,0.07449388860371597,0.11622777027289187,0.0,0.0,0.18856011522171506,0.0,0.0481996741053657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807801678797942,0.0382042665376373,0.05345118289883927,0.0,0.0,0.05439716824639678,0.0,0.06965012169385082,0.13158388744664126,0.0,0.0,0.0949723623380246,0.0,0.048109084589075854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03218038305925957,0.05164762864039065,0.04959877607154752,0.10786233920374047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0399470954275424,0.0,0.0,0.04002899451920882,0.0,0.15721112677761645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292742125464125,0.050269023002101836,0.0,0.0,0.07734324329322909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04011593545579992,0.04199682452319235,0.05754144026760884,0.0,0.05750447553451379,0.10989294097570884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04390563367715919,0.046247563087129816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437423003207186,0.0,0.07975837777205902,0.029291117870278962,0.0,0.0,0.04799954101568782,0.0,0.06820947368004357,0.0,0.0,0.15688217889912376,0.0,0.0,0.05532427235489076,0.04144727584778031,0.11851429915897198,0.039872415247206576,0.0,0.0,0.09033054185468427,0.0,0.1359817188680203,0.05608306645167036,0.0,0.0,0.16342580917356495,0.07314007400667444,0.0,0.0,0.14273560466120236,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pietruszkagruszka,2020/01/21,"Morality is difficult I understand morals, I understand society’s expectations, but I cannot truly understand them because I feel like they’re untrue. There’s many things I know that are wrong, like robbery, murder/suicide, self harm , vandalism, etc. But I can’t feel it in myself to think that they’re wrong. Nothing really matters that much to me, I can’t see how anyone’s life is valuable, and how being inconvenienced by shit like this is worth it. Of course, I’m not going to do anything irresponsible or illegal, but I just want to know how you feel it within yourself? Is it something you learn? Everyone around me seems to think (at least outwardly) in a different way to this. Sometimes I feel like I wanna act on my impulse to destroy things, it mostly ends up manifesting in me harming myself, but it’s hard not to harm other sometimes. It’s not necessarily anger fuelled, it’s more curiosity. I don’t really understand how I’m feeling

I repeat I will not fo anything to harm anyone. I know it’s wrong I just don’t know why",4.3388002512562815,6.2261329145728626,5.745047110552765,76.02601287688442,71.61306532663316,8.995100502512562,30.025439698492466,9.516144504307137,2.99846959798995,826,35,148,20,16,278,107,199,0.257,0.626,0.11800000000000001,-0.9887,1,0,1,0,0,1,27.0,0,2,1,0,8,16,3,0,1,0,13,2,1,4,0,39,34,10,0,3,11,0,6,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,17,2,0,0,17,0,1,2,9,11,0,0,0,7,24,5,20,32,5,14,2,0,1,0,4,9,1,3,6,97,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611493082684031,0.0,0.18965637895238488,0.10258315191796832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024589244129856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12039554461307475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206357929359812,0.0,0.12851694814026304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101115199596874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913301728757232,0.164647124985362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06549043200759473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322749352187903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533195092100542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139354776366514,0.2251910585741192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168297142074964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471062958656164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057062765597678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764436561516026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182699116909293,0.10490517703739596,0.12021473370895178,0.0,0.11828657648737442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887131615992528,0.2279397691518593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604785907974286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15311338638052316,0.14767525199354065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4798527876901776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796830418173379,0.0914677964503619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398122867046376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3779725659668409,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,orangecorneas,2020/01/21,"i kind of want to climb out of my skull i constantly get trodden on because i’m friendly. i’ve tried hard to lock up but i always let my nice side show and it’s killing me
it led to me getting sexually assaulted 
now i’m suicidal. i used to self harm before had a bunch of issues 
also suffering from religious guilt about my sexuality. i just need a friend in my life that can show me i’m not the only one (not the only one that is sexual, not the only one who does these things, not the only one struggling). everyone around me seems so perfect and they’ve gotten their shit together and are so close to God and i’m here the stupid sinner who can’t get anything right",1.8412617598229133,3.8093149856115134,3.7756834532374133,87.03698395130051,79.0,7.1546209186496945,22.92252351964581,8.139509932561175,1.2562790260099614,529,17,112,10,13,179,91,139,0.23199999999999998,0.645,0.124,-0.9694,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,2,8,13,4,2,7,0,6,3,2,2,1,19,18,8,2,2,6,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,1,2,0,2,5,8,0,4,2,1,14,5,15,15,1,12,0,1,0,0,6,8,1,1,2,70,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227115372094204,0.12768022421423195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12627383399305656,0.13660039242894284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353988734598374,0.0,0.13057212355614164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658217300998757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13428253303159093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14662521628764716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371055948000872,0.0,0.24050922505138256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745840190035075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601588361287567,0.0,0.0,0.16976640744069688,0.15979147227031928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15690998805509612,0.10838417769217597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11377903098133645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159187244190159,0.4668135341011839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104292814418256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13969241618346076,0.16007872144068258,0.0,0.157511174741174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041615628265532,0.0,0.16784614913070384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019433906770041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418046318332748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252896920273227,0.0,0.0,0.09050703600313466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MTG_aspiring,2020/01/21,"I feel worthless I keep getting ignored. It infuriates me because it KEEPS HAPPENING. Everyone from old friends, family, and even new people I message. It really makes me feel like raging. If this keeps up, I won't be able to contain my depression and anger anymore. The people that will talk to me don't offer much in terms of a conversation, even with my excessive efforts to carry the conversation. They're simply incapable of transcribing their thoughts to text.
   I'm a lonely person. My health is deteriorating. I do just enough to maintain my body so I'm not miserable. I just want to feel like I have a chance to find love or even an unwavering faithful companion. These days, life is becoming a major chore with no compensation. I get no benefits for taking care of myself. Where is the hope I need to continue fighting the loneliness?
   I long for connection to another human being. At the same time, I'm growing colder to everyone and I want to turn violent. Let's see how much I get ignored then. But I don't want to my life to end or the quality of it suffer because people don't want to acknowledge my messages or give me a moment of their time. I have so much to offer. BUT I DON'T EVEN GET THE SLIGHTEST CHANCE TO CHANGE SOMEONE'S MIND. It has almost entirely shifted my self image.
   I used to be happier until I realized that I'm an unapproachable, unappealing, insignificant piece of trash. I cheated on my last serious girlfriend when we were in high school and I gave up on dating or being with someone(by choice) because I burned with remorse. I became content with working on myself, making sure I didn't hurt someone like that again.
   Some years passed, and I decided that I had punished myself and grew enough, that it was time to start looking for a potential mate. Since then, I haven't had anything close to a girlfriend. It's been almost ten years since we broke up and about 7 years since I got back on the horse. This is starting to look like concrete evidence that I'm not worthy of anyone's time. I will probably get pity comments saying contrary, but nothing will change. People will continue to perceive me as something to avoid at all costs.
   What can I do? Is this what it's like trying to date during your twenties? Am I just that ugly? Are skinny people hated? I literally have no clue how to feel better about being so low on the totem pole. 
   That's just my love life, my ex best friend of 10 plus years was the most toxic, manipulative person I've ever met. He ruined my reputation just because we were friends. I couldn't ever perceive the situation from the outside looking in until we had our final falling out. By that time it was too late. Now everyone associates me with him and they probably think I'm a heartless heathen 😭😭 plus who knows what he's been saying about me 😭😭😭 
   This happened somewhat recently and lead me to a deep depression which lead to a severe decrease of my health. It got to the point where I couldn't even walk to my kitchen and fix something to eat without my body trying to shut down from malnutrition. I started eating about a week ago. I don't feel or look as healthy as I did before, but I can actually get up and move around a lot more than before. I have an appetite, a potential job interview coming up, and people that do care about me, but my body craves something more than they can give me.
   I want a best friend. I want to be desired as a mate. I just want to feel like I have a purpose. And with so much strife happening in my life, that throws out any, if not all, possibility of a mate considering me as a candidate until I get my life straightened out. Which, when my life was optimal, the chances were already slim to none. The people that were drawn to me had ulterior motives. They didn't want me for me. 
   Anyways, venting my frustrations have helped me calm down, but I have no direction of what to do next. If you want to help, feel free to ask questions or give advice. That's probably gonna be the most interaction I get from another person if this post doesn't get ignored too. Thanks for reading and I hope nobody has to feel like I do :/",4.20840919133893,5.8368819987546745,5.243445346081232,80.53792983971398,71.47820672478207,8.318876792672638,29.01637006387337,8.887732524166402,2.3755906238701643,3267,129,618,63,62,1074,339,803,0.136,0.7240000000000001,0.141,0.9603,1,3,3,0,2,0,85.0,5,2,5,8,35,51,9,2,37,0,63,17,4,9,5,123,136,50,0,19,26,1,8,7,10,6,8,2,2,5,36,33,4,8,19,1,2,10,21,25,0,1,22,15,96,27,106,98,22,83,1,11,5,2,56,30,0,20,49,427,132,8,0.0512184372762718,0.0,0.04998180643324012,0.0,0.0,0.05005006412645612,0.0454020543017473,0.0,0.10257573288850047,0.0,0.056520819161490994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03483029370291732,0.10741399460397,0.0,0.0,0.050794926973411,0.0358131222315528,0.0,0.042148409784686716,0.045595268115171735,0.04788232487251017,0.0,0.0,0.039383816739997725,0.0,0.12488913588507165,0.05656673994339451,0.08716623541190048,0.0,0.10750117998996228,0.04529854554870594,0.0,0.17067641233133202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444122066612717,0.0,0.10836463063174484,0.044120148523133534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0330316548475988,0.0,0.08822872994988312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481849606101948,0.0,0.0,0.04536433298917359,0.10584467451538644,0.0,0.16914647384195514,0.09266001765452182,0.0,0.14682423520616064,0.0,0.0,0.04828418433988451,0.0,0.20718064662984875,0.14636184729638496,0.0,0.05610729449872027,0.046812723770285086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15828495034728227,0.0,0.2408356756243068,0.14740017632992122,0.0,0.0,0.08192812636624816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13587688479576135,0.0,0.0,0.05056760302449703,0.0,0.10888560748514564,0.0,0.0,0.068661277735927,0.054115091069721184,0.0,0.10174292991735573,0.0,0.0,0.05483039642916517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0508263958621784,0.1365759011885687,0.0,0.0,0.028148313649185658,0.0417498624139214,0.05777662816573224,0.0,0.0,0.052374322270282436,0.21706258174424287,0.17515918916991985,0.0,0.0,0.04532670523927365,0.17204235047605562,0.0,0.0,0.04354408378363652,0.09245327868627408,0.0,0.0683774091991898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05171602091382449,0.0,0.0,0.05443709312826718,0.15060577866793906,0.03797782225389332,0.0,0.04946708588370738,0.054471389103817235,0.0,0.0,0.04914547193547502,0.0,0.05374513405292492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485589078327977,0.13416589152725655,0.0,0.0,0.04841797848804915,0.0577410923173823,0.04905310482691868,0.0,0.1656664145468013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05737637163945765,0.0,0.051232297712799066,0.0,0.03281184244222138,0.0,0.05057202777200508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08146191415926927,0.0,0.05183579294544969,0.040814463235759976,0.0,0.053432000405258986,0.05786225537363481,0.0,0.12710526177497625,0.05757166946692813,0.0,0.0,0.08679443138814777,0.1182913659651548,0.0,0.0,0.10875802057198528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04827277098757904,0.0,0.038509890618589615,0.04116743976274552,0.0,0.04715505562992239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03281870649678117,0.0,0.04066171804239838,0.1493294133177795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695479136881328,0.055710952012075564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04423628495042003,0.0,0.0,0.27188965196546955,0.0,0.04108434093451438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049372745800129535,0.0,0.037287632345769706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193197737396128
mentalhealth,tiptory,2020/01/21,"venting.. I don't know what I want to accomplish by posting here, I've just been feeling like garbage and need to get it out to people who don't know me or expect anything of me, lol. This won't be interesting to read.

I live in Australia, known for being on fire. I'm 25 and was first diagnosed with depression and anxiety at 14. If you had told me then that I would still be suicidal more than 10 years from then, I don't know if I would have been willing to keep on going. And the thought of another 10 years like this makes me feel so depressed I don't know what to do. I can count the periods of my life since then where I *wasn't* wicked depressed on one hand. And it's stupid, because it's not like I've had any particular struggles. I was diagnosed with ASD at 20 (late, I know), graduated school and moved to a nice city for a reasonably well-paying, entry level, year-long contract in my field at 22. While I was living apart from them my parents split up, but I was already an adult, so.

At 24 I moved back to my hometown for a job that I'd been verbally assured of for the next year - there would be a month of training with several other applicants, and out of them three of us would be hired (so, I thought, me and two others). Two weeks into the training the manager took me aside and told me the guarantee was being rescinded as my performance wasn't what they were expecting (in their words, my demo reel \[I'm an animator\] ""was misleading"". obviously it was all my work lol). I had moved cities at pretty significant expense (animators aren't known for their high salaries), from somewhere with much more opportunity, and felt pretty winded by this - obviously if I had been told ""come here for a month and maybe you'll get hired"", I would have made pretty different plans. Instead of staying for another two weeks to pretty likely get rejected again, I left for a three-month freelance thing, and have been jumping from gig to gig ever since - longer-term positions in animation in my hometown are pretty hard to come by. At the moment I'm working from home, and money is really really tight as hours are pretty hard to nail down when you're working freelance.

After what happened with that studio, I was feeling pretty destabilised and negative about my future in this industry, so I've started studying another discipline part time, online. But I'm finding it very difficult to balance freelancing from home (right now on two separate projects), keeping my life moving w/ cooking, cleaning and all, and study, and my grades aren't good at all, although I know I have ability - I get excellent grades on work I turn in, but other assessments I fail just by nonsubmission because I can't make myself complete them.

My motivation is completely shot. I'm exhausted all the time and cry for no reason every day. I've done everything everyone tells me to - I eat really healthily, almost all food I cook myself, I work out, I have a cat, I make time to see my family and friends, I take my medication every day, I drink plenty of water. (I have PCOS and hypothyroidism, but my doctor won't consider putting me on thyroid medication, so I just try to mitigate what I can with good diet and exercise). I went to a psychiatrist and he just told me to get off my antidepressants and lectured me about big pharma. I've seen lots of psychologists over the last 10 years and faithfully do my mindfulness exercises and interrogate my thoughts for their usefulness and fairness. But I still have anxiety attacks several times a week. I just don't know what to do. I feel overwhelmed by living in the world and by my own uselessness. I feel completely worthless and unequal to my life, even my relatively easy, safe life. I'm always scrambling just to stay afloat. The world just seems black, I can't see any future. Sorry if you read all this.",7.285746930422918,6.994414817189636,7.510092428376537,73.85777165757166,63.856753069577074,11.204488403819921,35.24178035470669,10.740141929328727,3.7278758799454295,3043,124,567,71,40,991,333,733,0.1,0.772,0.128,0.9702,3,1,1,0,0,0,106.0,1,3,7,13,27,27,2,2,22,2,61,21,1,8,10,114,114,51,1,13,18,1,11,4,1,9,13,0,4,1,24,40,7,5,23,7,2,11,16,13,0,7,33,15,87,14,94,66,12,89,1,8,4,0,21,38,0,8,41,377,111,22,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053149558300555684,0.0,0.058572461314689926,0.0,0.044164822589926316,0.0,0.0,0.07218918836489119,0.16696950266116892,0.08120845110617245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043678349645563365,0.0,0.0,0.06038344269243254,0.0,0.040813404983345285,0.0,0.06471123551264223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914433205642677,0.16695258936393087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583032610791668,0.06846133352006897,0.0,0.1371470003929459,0.10774531158194124,0.0,0.0554548043406243,0.0,0.054327181832647085,0.0,0.05431682208952802,0.0,0.051995849896483176,0.0,0.05431164477691272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03505726011265678,0.04801173602934733,0.089440349487227,0.0507179299253744,0.04770273244399553,0.0,0.05003684591475474,0.0,0.13418816939833011,0.03791865442634499,0.050962828255203006,0.0,0.04851197298177936,0.04514778704275065,0.06418165540610328,0.0,0.04100762899607113,0.0,0.13865429984694236,0.0,0.03016522832996698,0.08903796024392886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04693635428696881,0.0,0.0950942241961867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0560794079994815,0.10648233888476896,0.0,0.05227075312777872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05267133685547999,0.09435563517494884,0.0,0.0,0.2041904603869925,0.04326533545357997,0.05987385477307905,0.0,0.057668977407478686,0.0,0.14996113951988,0.10372415468213002,0.0,0.14060550334118108,0.0469720136497695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04512468504062965,0.0,0.05022331693424188,0.10628914834925976,0.0,0.053323592287606116,0.0,0.0,0.1069402139024052,0.0,0.0,0.053593254295728664,0.0,0.12709812317850624,0.22565239348208274,0.03901814975289146,0.03935637447905056,0.0,0.0,0.0564486392514024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03596676147155993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058936403407329176,0.05747787809799788,0.0,0.036797330939143634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05083367735048111,0.3779930702000671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0533576571104997,0.0,0.0,0.10618394497332832,0.0,0.10200862623485096,0.10914524409052027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045327988016700065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05371737391736585,0.08459196467503292,0.048319861716008855,0.0,0.11992518030460653,0.0,0.08781269319466034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941603767139605,0.037568604790940735,0.11314733784160245,0.0847756941122887,0.0,0.0,0.055488241240037366,0.0,0.058058289326950965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03990775632684192,0.0,0.04639216969677952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03526240489608711,0.0,0.0,0.1264130779963937,0.12379992242802094,0.0,0.0,0.2028717197014976,0.058971176501830036,0.03603621235899381,0.057733196898800264,0.20739644579290947,0.0,0.06384582827143903,0.04584201233108468,0.0,0.043794586105695116,0.03130654894145276,0.0,0.12772696887942067,0.0,0.0477231447943391,0.04920347524166449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932056572684113,0.0,0.0,0.1885240525710647,0.0,0.0,0.1709011996718344
mentalhealth,iwannastartfrmthetop,2020/01/21,"DAE feel lonely? there’s so many of us struggling with mental health yet it’s super easy to feel alone. 

guess i just wanted to make this post as a way to say you’re not alone or what not. 

it’s hard for me too but keep your heads up, things will clear up.",-0.1101190476190439,1.8186034642857152,0.9035714285714284,105.20809523809523,85.78571428571429,3.733333333333334,11.11904761904762,3.1291,-2.060895238095238,198,1,51,0,6,61,47,56,0.115,0.7290000000000001,0.155,0.5103,0,4,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,1,0,1,5,3,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,1,1,13,7,4,0,1,5,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,4,1,9,6,0,5,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,2,1,29,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4842101823645123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23639238349837485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575132384516152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094032433658152,0.0,0.2399054271860491,0.2484761844388771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20777682559050936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603676309514353,0.2369961745837194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235575322380814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22387767499824615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858955106637388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443769384007352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529990420628184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811847644465521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787783521754038,0.18554798326252464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,babielungz,2020/01/21,"a letter to my 12 year old self, on february 17th, 2017 tia,

you are almost 13. you never thought you'd get this far, and you almost didn't. i know things are hard right now, it has been exactly one month since you saw your mum. i hate to say it, but it will be a very, very long time until you see her again.

life has been absolute shit. you have anorexia nervosa now, and an addiction to meth. you hear voices sometimes too, and 50% of the time you don't even feel like yourself, you feel like a completely different person. the summer after your suicide attempt (good news, it failed) you had a flashback of your mum when you looked in your bathroom mirror so you cut off all your hair and tried to change your name to something with no familial attatchment. then, to make things worse, you got adopted. it was terrible, and you were high the whole day.

you can no longer be used as a sacrafice anymore though, you lost your virginity. that's kind of cool, even though you lost it because the person promised you drugs in return. how could you ever turn that down? during your overdose you somehow managed to smoke your first cigarette out of your bedroom window, it was the closest to heaven you had ever felt. you will smoke many more in the years to come. you opened up quite a bit, not emotionally though. you opened up physically.

your body was less of a temple and more of a motel. a tiny, afraid, underweight motel. you remember almost nothing from when you were 13. your cat also died, and it sucked because you started to like her more than most people. your other cat is still alive, but she's not much like herself. she's old and has dementia. she'll still give you kisses and purr when you hold her though. your grades decline A LOT by the way, it causes a lot of issues for you.

your room triggers you, you hate things touching your body, you cry more often than you let on, you barely leave the house, and you hate yourself more than anything. your life got fucked up because you decided it was a good idea to try meth. it ended with 8 months in a lockdown rehabilitation facility where you were emotionally drained the entire time. you did break the law (twice) and punch a man in the ear while you were there though, that's always a fun story to tell.

yeah, life is still kinda shit. and i hate to break it to you but this will not be your last suicide attempt, you'll try at least 4 more times before you finally give up in a good way.

last year you finally came out as lesbian. you've brought your grades up quite a bit too, and your aunt and uncle are really proud. you don't really care because you feel like it isn't good enough, but either way improvement is always good. you have almost 2 years clean off of meth, which is fucking epic, bro. yeah, rehab gave you some ptsd but at least it helped you clean up your act a bit. you're much less of a pussy now, you sneak out all the time and you always get away with it. you smoke weed with people you never thought you'd get high with, the people who don't want you getting high. it's nice.

my dude, you also get yourself a girlfriend. she is the most beautiful thing on the planet, i can't wait for you to see her in real life, it changes everything. she has bullied you into loving her by always being pretty and smart and caring and sweet. it is bullshit, don't let anyone else do that to you. anyways, she and i/you will be together for 2 years in early march. hell yeah.

in other cool news, there's this really fuckin cool kid who lives down the street. y'all meet at therapy, and now you're best friends. she is by far, the best friend you've ever had, and one of your most favourite people on earth. which is underrstandable, because she's hella pretty and nice and funny and epic. be friends with her for a long time, i will be so mad if i fuck this one up.

like, fuck yeah things suck but bro you have never been so ok either. i wish things were better, but i've learned to settle with ok. it getss better dude, when you wake up you'll be absolutely miserable and sick and tired and afraid, it is by far one of the worst things you'll ever feel. but it doesn't last. nothing does, so just chill out because this is just the tip of the iceberg. it only goes downhill from here.

and then it goes uphill. then things are finally worth it, i promise.

love, older and wiser and somehow stupider tia",2.8884310921813214,4.8539208450867095,3.3498562519014317,91.31761066321876,75.8092485549133,6.171128688773957,21.670596288408884,7.005888975835272,0.4500462427745666,3421,89,713,35,76,1063,351,865,0.159,0.675,0.16699999999999998,0.5648,1,1,9,0,0,2,119.0,0,87,0,13,42,63,17,3,42,9,69,26,7,5,10,113,118,62,3,4,16,5,8,6,4,9,9,4,5,5,47,46,0,2,12,2,1,4,16,25,0,6,28,20,112,38,87,68,30,113,2,4,4,10,130,47,10,15,63,477,159,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199172456969856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910280835466391,0.0,0.0,0.07627914448072125,0.15873549450443375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0472980171838967,0.03334761504044798,0.04886647060315677,0.039246758073174605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04480855294066256,0.0,0.0,0.1744369619312436,0.0,0.04058269541883347,0.0,0.10010040296181504,0.08436005378606988,0.15620315231492848,0.10595094647357042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054547367578362066,0.0972511025039851,0.04899320297649209,0.10090441048236637,0.04108275505732284,0.05000454410958432,0.0,0.0,0.038078477861778814,0.0,0.05238783060759766,0.03075763411200665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049497151940011724,0.049828377390920615,0.0,0.0,0.0417359156738182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05530800958891475,0.0,0.03984085661861789,0.10729499739060276,0.04224128528388472,0.04927896871151384,0.0,0.06300072312780483,0.17256192176741866,0.0,0.0,0.04286282826276695,0.0,0.044960123317309586,0.0,0.09645878405927136,0.10221431914029996,0.04579215578168858,0.15673398530909738,0.0,0.04056710681572245,0.0,0.0,0.11054102369411163,0.17636331570794922,0.12458647833666728,0.09150173699578867,0.0,0.20001049223349976,0.07628789250437717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04272299710805419,0.18834537221034744,0.0,0.0,0.05375276883194453,0.0,0.03196719128981258,0.1511688268789293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05503059338550975,0.0,0.0538388822635125,0.0,0.04977844495615904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04966426579472079,0.02621048010116853,0.11662694451235114,0.0,0.050499335160628565,0.0,0.09753736218703388,0.13474612962424815,0.13980050201716793,0.0,0.042113237780026805,0.08441249593365134,0.040049580411022016,0.0,0.10412371459345107,0.0810926974708937,0.08608845458720689,0.0,0.031835028299051785,0.0483525790652251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613519180431545,0.0,0.0701187611821856,0.0,0.11034989107635068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152423340746528,0.0,0.10009024229198027,0.0,0.1292703408076932,0.036272197609760186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13225554141364454,0.08328627838853214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704057502080624,0.0,0.0,0.05574983006934363,0.0,0.0,0.10145341527428056,0.0,0.05428435993112022,0.09165886320576093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054026159812646427,0.040729024655717164,0.0,0.03792688803111297,0.0,0.0,0.07600929063199566,0.0,0.04975354477152439,0.0,0.09791106792921654,0.039451622526159316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03671591760239644,0.04716897488274964,0.0,0.03375690600357944,0.0,0.1142615684077846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043354272241222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041685234798337,0.0,0.05454038321674363,0.0,0.2534775393787127,0.0,0.2342875641498203,0.07572483132824841,0.16685883204508334,0.05481536518295948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713996887269984,0.05187560495908805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041190896225364065,0.0,0.07870240243747934,0.02813019636459641,0.11356795374675985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05324682956266763,0.05484387350965994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048602601009599705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15356161788079578
mentalhealth,okmicheala,2020/01/21,"Is inpatient worth it? Hi there! I’m not really sure if this is the right place, but here we go.

For some background: I am 21 and female. I have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, severe anxiety, and BPD. I struggle with suicidal ideation.

Recently I’ve plummeted as far as mental health goes. I hurt myself yesterday. I have a plan as to how I’d kill myself. My house is filthy and I’ve no desire to clean, let alone get out of bed in the morning. I sleep too much or not at all, ya know, the usual stuff.

My SO thinks inpatient would be good for me. He’s worried about me. He told me he’s scared to leave me alone and feels like he has to ‘babysit’ me or I’ll hurt myself or commit suicide. 

I am honestly terrified to try it out. I’m so scared of getting better because I’m at least familiar with being low. Being happy is intimidating because it’s unfamiliar. 

So, I guess, what is it like? Is it helpful?",0.7489238329238291,3.119491383783785,3.0614373464373483,88.09112407862409,86.5135135135135,6.606879606879607,22.46314496314497,7.84624498591911,1.3244054054054053,706,26,147,15,22,241,116,185,0.3,0.545,0.155,-0.9898,0,2,0,0,0,7,28.0,1,1,0,2,8,14,1,3,4,0,17,4,1,1,3,28,28,16,3,3,7,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,2,0,8,10,0,0,3,0,1,1,3,7,0,0,2,1,20,7,21,21,4,13,0,3,0,0,9,9,0,6,5,93,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869526756726495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059758362671392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688944243097578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12251941241003556,0.0,0.0,0.17447494572205066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14060604953333256,0.0,0.0,0.15876852842691713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004543628373028,0.09896657449365233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475346029297714,0.0,0.07873036007737548,0.1161932307271091,0.0,0.0,0.1526075152611984,0.0,0.0,0.14746882609015002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472519756141588,0.0,0.0,0.09285440958013663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15984617514033836,0.29660060257288057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326402706568676,0.0,0.07613301501973127,0.0,0.0,0.1466843273160484,0.0,0.14165733385477666,0.0,0.13535849882384146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13960666574486288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183622500700186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14473541078488947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887465062600994,0.0,0.13678265056761998,0.0,0.0,0.11830471757419192,0.0,0.0,0.27738739701664505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650059937298982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386310460111645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448226801104144,0.15858485241178735,0.3030608602850445,0.0,0.1305638285989373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887650715345741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237230766912594,0.0,0.09405345597964042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15257232562575115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14068495554306662,0.0,0.09840844816295302,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alyoshajung,2020/01/21,"Can someone help me understand what my options are for short-term suicidal ideation rehab in New York City? I love my job. It's maybe the only thing that gives me a consistent feeling of self-worth, and I'm surrounded by fun and supportive coworkers. It has been keeping me going and I'm extremely grateful. So I don't want to risk losing it or the support of my coworkers, even if the law might protect me to enter a rehab program.

If I felt I really needed to, to turn my life around, I wondered what my options for short-term (2-6 weeks) suicidal ideation rehabilitation in New York City, and what I might expect from the program. It sounds ignorant and I admit I am—I admit I'm driven by a momentary spark of feeling self-care.

That's all, but here is more if someone would be willing to read, especially to dispel concern that I'm beyond ideation.

It's been 15 years since I remember wanting to take my life. I'm 30-something now. I made it this far because of good times with girlfriends and chasing dreams, because of novelties like doing drugs with friends or moving to a new city, and also because of therapy at times and medicine at times. Life always had something new to distract me. But there was never a stretch longer than week I think, that I didn't think about dying.

I always looked for some feeling that felt different one day in my life, anything to latch onto. And right now I feel something like that. I want to try again to find a therapist, despite the exhausting and disappointing process. I want to commit to seeing a psychiatrist regularly and open my mind to any medicine they want to suggest—in a way, I'm ready to submit to them. I want to drink less. All this, not because I care about me, but because I'm sick and tired of making my family and friends and coworkers feel the way I make them feel. Never seeming well, always worried or stressed or tired, everyone having to tiptoe, and closer ones walking on glass. Never being able to commit because I won't know how I'll feel, even the next day. Not replying to texts for days or weeks, and completely having given up on phone calls and emails. Never wanting anything even when they want do so much for me, because ultimately I don't give a damn about myself. Annually cutting communication with everyone and hearing later that they each wondered what they did wrong, when in fact it was my inability to cope with the burden and harm I felt I was to them.

If I *want* to die but still don't have the *will* to die, then *until* I gain the will to die, I want to get better, for all these people I've hurt and I'm going to hurt, wallowing and existing doing no service to anyone. I don't have the capacity to care about myself, but I have some capacity to care for others.

And I thought, aside from *trying* everything I say I want to do, then possibly failing and falling back to square one, what can I do to really drive it in, really feel like this time it's a real attempt to be better? And I thought, maybe I can prove it to myself by committing to a rehab program, even if it means unpaid leave from my job, and taking it from there.

Maybe none of this is a good idea, I don't know now.",5.685078693518364,6.024454617363348,6.368925368082589,78.55449314604844,67.13504823151125,9.31264173294974,31.80250465391775,9.206073818396263,2.6778289389067527,2500,96,480,43,38,821,269,622,0.16899999999999998,0.71,0.121,-0.9897,3,0,5,0,0,1,80.0,0,0,7,7,26,32,2,3,23,0,40,14,0,4,12,117,107,49,6,19,17,0,11,3,3,7,12,3,0,0,31,32,1,3,28,3,0,8,15,15,1,3,16,17,63,17,83,81,10,62,0,5,3,1,21,19,1,19,36,322,94,8,0.05609338012039988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044857855816303735,0.14002255742149552,0.0,0.0,0.03814542200583761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03922179561623403,0.0,0.0923201447467086,0.04993500079434763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043132346874868714,0.0,0.2393580271702536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922007267261812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057277612718802065,0.0,0.17157281838168395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05881284183502222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10852676906430668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328642902494945,0.058605643358446625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054950157545147184,0.06505051247011111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819659416102668,0.0,0.0,0.10719925706807454,0.050413113130185656,0.0,0.05287984659452593,0.0,0.22689998725092456,0.04007312196600098,0.16157532459676716,0.0,0.05126833321278207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667521267075069,0.0,0.029306475944022945,0.107619762991333,0.0637583211897508,0.09409693182519488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322131613838136,0.0,0.03759821029699767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009824713954075,0.0633225984462368,0.0,0.0,0.11132804883790938,0.04985837358614418,0.0,0.0,0.061654909491098114,0.0,0.0,0.05939479030279901,0.0,0.0,0.15848165302947678,0.08221317642226528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04710431182235255,0.06275414422377393,0.0,0.0,0.05062646559043873,0.053076912551113284,0.07488553360520392,0.0,0.16906001938100848,0.0611021352889846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190124238887756,0.056638323496402986,0.0,0.0,0.05961838587582478,0.04123508857553165,0.04159253060263781,0.17305069118418814,0.21670134424103166,0.059655946123568226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11403097823301225,0.04266154324607902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0388880869602561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323685790051473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05610855978569434,0.06384654698076661,0.10780456697464663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354286492546571,0.0479034401337996,0.0,0.044607707295163786,0.0,0.0,0.04469916152155235,0.05106530654158997,0.11703525795442694,0.0,0.0,0.04640102368859085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09505547789223227,0.1295502734738601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044796245822924345,0.0,0.0642547774081696,0.0,0.0,0.12271410705543538,0.1273082060480027,0.0,0.0,0.08435048188650268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414766875422892,0.06512873771667932,0.03726594926938225,0.07188474605946757,0.0,0.08906375624847251,0.13083400415687546,0.12894217755767795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616744607115361,0.06101348995140957,0.0,0.058395186944635816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639386181681492,0.08904862841528703,0.13498417809616367,0.0,0.050434685272375435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166175591435527,0.0,0.056965550349732816,0.0,0.03984712783983282,0.06132930547532359,0.0,0.036122297703829374
mentalhealth,ana_haro,2020/01/21,"What should I do with my suicidal friend (16 f) I have a friend she used to be my best friend but lately she hasn’t talked to me at all. She’s been struggling for a long time, since junior high, and in grade 10 she tried to kill herself. I tried to get her to go to the hospital but she wouldn’t and when I found out I went to her house and I saw her everyday after. She couldn’t tell her parents because they don’t believe in mental health and her sister is very belittling and emotionally abusive. I did my best to talk to her and check up on her but she needed real help. I got in contact with my sisters therapist and gave my friend the info I got but she didn’t do anything with it. I guess she’s tried to kill herself like three times and recently she got really bad and me and another friend took her to a hospital. Her family now knows but she only wants the meds no therapy and she’s been skipping a lot of school recently. Also she never initiates conversations with me or the friend that took her to the hospital.",2.8346027320880967,4.35945997630332,4.182341789796489,87.18397825480905,74.82938388625594,7.997881237803179,24.26010593810984,8.671277953709913,1.5231854474491218,809,25,173,16,17,267,112,211,0.139,0.7170000000000001,0.14300000000000002,-0.4478,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,3,13,2,1,9,0,14,1,0,1,2,36,30,19,3,5,6,3,0,1,6,2,1,0,0,0,3,16,0,0,3,0,1,4,7,4,0,1,13,1,44,9,26,13,4,23,0,0,1,0,42,8,0,3,12,123,47,3,0.0,0.12551482826910898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471562499667677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108135479932328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871749063756914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845071933796393,0.06457656874683347,0.0,0.0,0.11935168486478301,0.22234303378881246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916183414011686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986543432500566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615149700063733,0.491067485025919,0.0,0.05534630179861663,0.0,0.06020490647666521,0.0,0.2541760216577024,0.0,0.11669857949216925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260321192030485,0.0,0.0,0.0710055312743903,0.11192540884968104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222339643248019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344012248047209,0.0,0.05821872330502196,0.0,0.11949850959456025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05175415020649067,0.0,0.0,0.09374852588122648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006155739790007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766913106591645,0.0,0.10675686287257126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854894446192467,0.08170306623554185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056781211777811,0.0,0.0,0.1176275086134298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057643043628233,0.0678642280343827,0.0,0.20919469127184664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10721117166728926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762995133699374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074553581589763,0.0,0.11587493523633738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702919623956072,0.0925912513338914,0.0,0.12114510940621415,0.12299789235373572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235422896532998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23539382014785384,0.2157673170361358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149322640310703,0.0,0.08740689551016315,0.06248279742855072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820216153671553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tossinthisawaysohard,2020/01/21,"never really recovered, feeling lost I’m sorry if this wasn’t an appropriate sub to do this...

throwaway because my actual u/ is recognizable. I also apologize in advance that I’m going to explain a lot and it’s going to be really long, but this will be the first time I’ve ever told the entire story to someone, and I just need to do it. 

In April 2018, I [20F at the time] was at a university event with a ton of people that I knew and that knew me very well. I had just broken up with my boyfriend of almost a year, but we were still figuring out what breaking up looked like, because I was his first girlfriend, and it was generally a weird time. Anyway, so at this event, there was a guy who was 4(ish) years older than me who I didn’t know. He took an interest in me and it was sweet at first, as I had not really been hit on for over a year since being in the relationship. It very quickly became very uncomfortable. In pretty much every photo from that event, it looks normal, but I know that his hand was up my dress behind the scenes. He tried to kiss me against a wall at one point during the night but I pushed him off and ignored his advances for the rest of the first half of the night. 

Later on that night, my roommate who was also at the event and I invited a group of our friends back to our house to drink and wind down the night closer to home. I didn’t know until we were already at my house that someone that my roommate had invited had driven the guy to and from the event, and so he showed up at my house. He was one of my roommates friends, which I also didn’t know until this point. I didn’t want to be rude and cause a scene, so I didn’t say anything. I made a point to sit in our armchair, so he couldn’t sit next to me, and also positioned the chair on the complete opposite side of the room, with the large, circular coffee table between us (this is important). Cut a long story slightly shorter, I ended up getting way more drunk than I intended to, more than I originally thought I was at the time. 

By this point in the night, our other friends had mostly begin to filter out and go home. After saying goodbye to them, there was my roommate, me, the guy and his ride from earlier left in the house. My roommate went to the bathroom and I’m not sure where the ride went. I went to get up to put my glass in the sink in the kitchen, and in order to do so I had to walk around the coffee table. I don’t really know why I didn’t walk around all the couches, if I had maybe none of this would’ve happened. I hate myself for that. When I did this, I had my glass in one hand and my phone in the other. As I walked around, he told me to come sit with him, and I said “no, I’m going to the kitchen” he said something else, then reached up and grabbed my hand that was holding my phone and pulled me down into his lap. I remember trying to get up and not being able to, dropping the glass onto the couch, and him putting my phone out of reach.

Apparently by this point, my roommate and the ride saw this, me on top of his lap, and decided that it was consensual, since I’d just broken up with my boyfriend and they’d seen him flirting with me beforehand. She also claims that she had asked me how I felt about him earlier in the night and I laughed but didn’t say anything, but I don’t remember this. Ultimately, my roommate and the ride decided not to intervene and the ride drove home and left the guy with me, and my roommate went to bed. 

The last thing I remember that night is being guided or carried into my room and the door slamming behind me. I remember also feeling overpowered and scared, because he was extremely tall, especially by my standards (I’m above 5’10 for reference without specificity). When I “came to” I was shaking uncontrollably in bed around 7/8am the next morning. I rolled over and someone was in bed next to me. I thought perhaps my roommate had left the door unlocked and my ex-boyfriend had come over to try and talk, found that I was too drunk and decided to stay. I checked my phone first for evidence of that, and of course there was nothing. Then I finally saw his face and realized what was going on. Panic set in, and there’s a lot of blanks after this too. I remember that he woke up like nothing was wrong and asked if I’d give him a ride home. I didn’t really know how to respond to that because I’ve never been good with confrontation. I took him home. As soon as he got out of my car, I broke down. I had the worst panic attack I’d ever had in the parking lot adjacent to his house. I was probably there for more than an hour, because I remember I didn’t get home until after noon. 

I tried to talk to my roommate about what happened, and we ended up falling out as friends because she didn’t believe I would dare to accuse one of her friends of rape because she’d seen me sitting on his lap, which she took was being consensual. I don’t necessarily agree with that, but I honestly wasn’t in the right state of mind to argue with her over something I couldn’t remember or even begin to explain. She accused me of calling it rape to cover up me cheating on my boyfriend, but I hadn’t told her that we’d broken up already and wouldn’t believe me after I told her. So we cut our losses, moved out and moved on.

Honestly? I [now 23 at the time of this post] don’t know if this is actually rape. I’ll let you all answer that for me, I guess. But since then, I’m damaged. I was a victim of domestic abuse/violence two years before this happened, and the year in between I was drugged at a party and would’ve put money on me dying (but thankfully was well taken care of by kind strangers who have since become friends). The culmination of all of these things affects me every day. I’ve never had therapy, because my family does not believe in it, and even if they did approve, I couldn’t afford it. I can’t maintain or even desire being in a relationship, having sex is terrifying but I do it to make the other person happy and hope that one day I’ll just have sex and I won’t be scared anymore. I have flashbacks and random panic attacks  while out with friends, and now it’s affecting me at work due to what I do (ironically, therapy.) 

Any kind of advice or help you can offer me or even just talking to me would help at this point. I’m consistently sitting on the edge just waiting for the next traumatic thing to happen. I can’t live like this anymore.",5.380940695296523,5.1150599693251575,6.1036834355828224,82.26974192229041,67.78834355828221,9.132580777096113,30.57685071574642,8.687419134414649,2.15831600408998,5016,172,1052,71,75,1648,419,1304,0.115,0.785,0.1,-0.9687,4,0,4,0,1,0,141.0,11,2,3,13,52,55,13,7,69,0,100,16,4,9,9,187,181,99,1,16,33,0,7,3,8,5,1,5,17,5,68,81,5,3,31,4,2,38,35,28,2,12,89,19,165,27,198,70,15,221,0,4,6,6,100,98,0,18,75,753,233,1,0.037118290767496065,0.0,0.07244419482252329,0.0,0.0,0.036271564147043606,0.0,0.0,0.03716860647765465,0.0,0.08192191373340535,0.17810090229778508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02524171056232347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736227409181914,0.0,0.0,0.061090381236616136,0.13217259327081735,0.06940118253334229,0.08445482863693231,0.0,0.028541674424851244,0.0,0.1810157242587721,0.04099423591670124,0.03158493155184413,0.12545880860828568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03790192494731353,0.042453436212526736,0.03784457124186307,0.03813070932198296,0.0,0.0639482416362387,0.038917821664685034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04787645365091035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03852292559431572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03248246638638322,0.0,0.0,0.03636179387126493,0.043045433012907176,0.0,0.031007569021201636,0.0,0.06575157665521912,0.0,0.0,0.09806512392397404,0.06715123812290222,0.06254752174073824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034991821092314065,0.0,0.037536246183789986,0.0,0.03563938006209425,0.04066127320807286,0.0,0.1578639958247226,0.0,0.040698289955096785,0.20074249559746293,0.0,0.07757109970024871,0.03560724675948475,0.10547590017257208,0.031133061230398325,0.029686887947159138,0.0,0.04088998203350023,0.14701177435672966,0.13129432776263605,0.03951311073381178,0.0,0.03664662750942916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04975921576292682,0.0,0.22339603248143244,0.03686683796929266,0.036554039495690985,0.21414761974287974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730597583574401,0.14279469315055265,0.03025636108778388,0.0,0.0,0.12098739457661245,0.03795596715090553,0.0,0.05440236585513398,0.0,0.03277613078631033,0.06569703856948336,0.0623400315285696,0.0,0.0405189991006817,0.09466993034365843,0.0,0.03512222420692908,0.02477674731555508,0.0,0.03729031211332213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03747889243990174,0.0,0.0,0.07890173768376102,0.027286214599383768,0.027522742279943783,0.08588374232980353,0.0,0.15790289331623888,0.2438310099632404,0.03636804399279756,0.07123200215450083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576157226485415,0.0,0.0,0.13065094989941056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025733149189515584,0.03241025977896021,0.0,0.0,0.21053269480281914,0.0,0.035549062112005266,0.037762645976952,0.04001979542632072,0.0,0.0,0.1119424030861077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188946376690677,0.0,0.0,0.07970230630350904,0.294334513628601,0.03169881750454652,0.07061598904589332,0.08855386391224525,0.0743237687928852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281853477082345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435062194167924,0.05715094733686245,0.0,0.04155088759498751,0.0,0.039563159212414316,0.029642714954573195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03498354977143755,0.0,0.0,0.08950282830914567,0.0,0.034173535139069684,0.0848960007674972,0.0,0.07397922915709433,0.0,0.0,0.05893555343215835,0.10821986921957108,0.0,0.0,0.1418724699909912,0.12371936040517875,0.10080353169013127,0.0,0.03625917658124872,0.0,0.04464873353869856,0.0,0.0,0.09187943167520124,0.021893329596421648,0.029462771497017176,0.0,0.0,0.06674760225498913,0.13763610965484402,0.03349348403686009,0.0,0.0,0.035780707730571265,0.0,0.027022557755446545,0.0,0.0,0.10547107514176006,0.04058302402735328,0.0,0.11951481141650586
mentalhealth,lisarowe2002,2020/01/21,"I have no idea what's wrong with me or who I even am Hi, so basically I just need to rant about this because I feel like I'm completely losing my mind and I have no idea what is wrong with me and nobody seems to understand what I mean, I barely understand what I mean. Basically, I'm 17, I've been on Prozac (40 mg) for about 6 months? I think? I don't even remember when I started. I go to therapy bi-weekly. I feel completely empty and lost. My mental health seems like something that nobody can crack, not even me. I feel invalid and stupid whenever I complain about my mental wellbeing, and I don't know if it's because of metacognition or whatever, I just feel like that I'm self-aware of what's wrong with me it makes me fake. My trauma feels fake, my whole life feels fake and most times I can't remember being so viscerally angry or upset, I kept a trauma journal since my 17th birthday to make sure I remember when I have breakdowns and stuff, for a while I felt like someone was erasing my memory while I was asleep or that my medication erases my memory, and I still believe that now. I just don't feel like I fit into the mental illness box, my boyfriend says I'm not mentally ill and that bad stuff just happened to me, so that makes me feel fake and stupid, but I know he has the best intentions. My therapist just passes it off as anxiety and depression, which I know are serious things but it doesn't feel like anyone in my life takes me seriously. I can't open up about certain things without feeling they're downplayed, or that my traumas weren't severe enough, or that I'm making stuff up. 

Basically, I grew up in a super shitty home, (my therapist confirmed this), the school I go to and my therapist have almost called CPS numerous times. When I was very young (around 3-4) I was diagnosed with PAN and spent 6 months in intensive care. I had most of my intestines removed. I don't remember much about the hospital but my parents say that I was very angry, and I would bite and scream all the time. I don't remember anything about it really. From ages 8-12 I believed I was an angel and that my parents couldn't be my ""real"" parents because my ""real"" parents would never hurt me. I truly believed that the day I turned 12 I would be brought to live in the clouds with my true angel mother who would never hurt me, and that I was on earth to suffer for a little while before I was able to be happy. Of course, that never happened and my delusion completely fell apart as soon as I woke up in the same bed.  When I was 13 I had vivid hallucinations of a ""Ring"" style girl with long black hair ripping out her intestines at the end of my bed. I had flashing images of fucked up faces that were in front of my eyes. I know I wasn't dreaming. I also hallucinated a boy who opened his mouth full of teeth and he ate me. I didn't sleep that night and cried on the floor. I had hallucinations outside the next day of a giant furry creature with huge teeth. There were other things. Those hallucinations only lasted 3 days before I think things went back to normal and I no longer had visual hallucinations or auditory ones. At least none that I can remember. I also have extreme apathy about my family, I feel no love towards them whatsoever. When I was 12 I prayed every day that my parents would die in a car crash. I always fantasized about a ""Sucker Punch"" style revenge where I would kill them all and get to be free. I hoped a lot that my family would die and I could escape. I've never acted on those thoughts of course, but they've been extremely present and intrusive throughout my whole life. My freshmen year of high school I was sexually assaulted, the school did nothing, they knew about it, the kid wasn't even punished. It wasn't that bad, just unwanted groping so I didn't even have it bad. I have vivid nightmares about being raped almost every week, often 2 or 3 nights in a row. They're extremely lucid, not that I can do anything but that I can feel everything happening. They're often violent and I am scared to go to sleep sometimes. I believed I was being raped while I slept by my father or a demon but I can acknowledge that that's a ridiculous thing to believe. I've had a few suicide attempts but I've never been hospitalized. 

That's about all I can remember. That's all my mental stuff thrown out there. I don't know. Most times I feel extremely fake. I feel like I am empty and blank all the time. I feel like I don't know who I am, that I can't even rely on myself to judge my self-concept. Sometimes I feel like just anxiety and depression doesn't explain it all, and that nobody is taking me seriously. I don't know what to tell my therapist, because whenever I go into his office I am suddenly fine and in a good mood. I write stuff down in my trauma journal or in my phone but I can't work up the courage to talk about it. I don't know what to do. I feel like I am about to snap. The best way I can put it is that my foundation is infested in termites, and there are so many holes and pieces rotting and being eaten away, but everyone has just put a gloss over it and pretends like that's enough even though the termites still chew away at it. I feel like I'm on a stack of cards built on top of that gloss, and at any second the foundation will fall away. I feel like a blanket is being pulled over my head and I'm suffocating. I just don't know what to do. I should be grateful that I'm on medication and have therapy but I just don't feel like my needs are being met. I know that's selfish to say but some things don't add up. Recently I've missed a lot of days for my meds, but on those days at least I feel like myself again, I feel like a person instead of a husk. I just don't know what's wrong with me, if I'm being ungrateful and unreasonable or if something really is wrong. Anyways that's my rant.",4.350148957933769,5.028487739057244,5.362520564292716,83.40024357499044,70.17845117845117,8.641452499680348,27.327536973106593,8.805574503141022,1.8640884243276643,4606,146,959,78,79,1519,414,1188,0.17800000000000002,0.718,0.10400000000000001,-0.9982,5,0,2,0,0,1,120.0,0,0,3,8,59,75,11,2,40,0,107,30,13,5,14,199,194,83,4,18,41,7,24,16,0,9,10,5,3,4,77,53,3,1,55,2,2,17,40,44,0,2,43,33,164,31,114,128,26,123,4,8,4,4,36,58,1,27,63,654,241,4,0.033609737950491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731059528165692,0.0,0.0,0.053755390592287566,0.027965994394779658,0.0,0.0,0.022855774333357386,0.0,0.051422715076454836,0.0,0.0,0.023500710240314627,0.0,0.0553159011959744,0.029919792454176305,0.0,0.0,0.0947323655082138,0.025843813878614987,0.08418818192690375,0.08195273720124042,0.0,0.057198823043396685,0.1893333265854352,0.07054269284598126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0343193002414297,0.0,0.03426736781213886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571751236719802,0.0,0.0,0.02683464090419935,0.0,0.03691871894690372,0.130053003082917,0.0,0.05789603609585287,0.03411317654032247,0.06976320339863297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029768251925391825,0.06945568750425757,0.0,0.1553924045471796,0.0,0.05663530759880037,0.03211554492537167,0.03020626530148773,0.0,0.063368539499292,0.0,0.3738700540828121,0.3121404455958613,0.03227061914321399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031071661155126832,0.017559700888354266,0.0,0.07640475445591619,0.028190253589655406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916294081526517,0.03577819101883537,0.0,0.0,0.03449328754683723,0.0357255797791704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035510533447354616,0.033713307534871784,0.03338205336481135,0.0,0.0,0.07195983921826984,0.07588260630948106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03718419534525852,0.0,0.20318136307708234,0.027396422261618283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121865561740613,0.26272032430673425,0.03368578702136342,0.02967801436922745,0.029743560449410587,0.0,0.03760069972858189,0.03668899924084408,0.057147594619809026,0.030334100712097807,0.0,0.08973904426338032,0.0340749990248326,0.0,0.07322171532078395,0.03733284208994237,0.06771655012270686,0.16935355379681938,0.0,0.03393625427070575,0.0,0.053653944352955986,0.0,0.024707024579623853,0.04984238964569171,0.1296095094101998,0.0,0.03574433760451096,0.06308092456089365,0.032930407168430896,0.032249450023141314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022774828262107603,0.025561720224144574,0.0,0.0,0.18659818274847856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02934672679034228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757413942431052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651047979142464,0.04306251751522131,0.0,0.03318556151711168,0.0,0.2665129688974047,0.0,0.0,0.08018343784300225,0.033649210954632865,0.10204454743250738,0.0,0.06119408627329829,0.07012457338768703,0.037969437252495054,0.0,0.027802322546094868,0.0,0.06726802100257165,0.0,0.028477421897728925,0.05174883659503793,0.06648178046361941,0.0,0.023789145509729395,0.0,0.05368156028546104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923755444697922,0.03676359823662807,0.0,0.03167678026342731,0.0,0.05054068031054466,0.027014234250358503,0.02937639237789515,0.0,0.07687132892818667,0.15609398492338508,0.13397289876971313,0.043071525953873514,0.033021396890397146,0.026682377688529883,0.09799054240642108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03655774361092599,0.0,0.06997784503506406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554631074113235,0.0,0.026677845580569612,0.053919408951485684,0.0,0.0,0.0311565638016608,0.0,0.07504814429756956,0.0,0.03239858801797764,0.0,0.02446828951800449,0.0,0.0,0.16712775470676405,0.18373486151903376,0.0,0.02164356930157257
mentalhealth,Amy0824,2020/01/21,"I dont know what's wrong with me .. I feel like an outcast in my own life , I either just wanna stay in my room reading and watching tv or just sleep . Sometimes I also have dark thoughts which weren't like me . I dont even know who I am anymore I am either sad or faking it . Am I depressed or just sad ?",-0.23071428571428496,1.6406296515151515,1.853809523809524,98.565,85.81818181818181,3.771428571428572,20.034632034632033,3.1291,-0.6479367965367961,231,7,55,0,7,77,44,66,0.18100000000000002,0.7070000000000001,0.111,-0.6952,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,1,0,7,2,1,0,0,15,11,5,0,1,8,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,2,12,2,4,9,3,4,0,3,1,0,1,3,0,3,2,40,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19026953852027528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23595891023079246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049255330253633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5576955929401436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571480461346899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203026623733504,0.1699745626443093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26151609261976555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805434877077474,0.23247749814002494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23799063916874064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23809808044010025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353151479218155,0.0,0.0,0.2535977285448217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18888686821852088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26013500730718475,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rosie-27,2020/01/21,"I have some sort of eating disorder issue, and it’s consuming my life. I don’t know where do go from here. Any advice? I’ve been struggling with a lot of body image issues for about 10 months now. It’s been about 9 months since I began to obsess over my calorie intake, exercise, and purging. I began dating my girlfriend around the time this started, though she has absolutely nothing to do with it. I ended up breaking up with her and cutting ties with the majority of my friends when school came back around this year because I snapped. My anxiety and depression had suddenly worsened and my eating habits became worse. I lost a significant amount of weight in the span of about a month, causing my family to notice. I lost my period, I would barely eat, and I went down quite a few clothing sizes. My self hatred, shame, and embarrassment caused me to attempt to take my own life multiple times. I was admitted into a treatment program for anxiety and depression, where I did not even mention a word about my possible eating disorder issues. Looking back, I realize how stupid that was of me. But a large part of me did not want to “recover”, and I often still feel the same way. Even though this thing consumes my life completely and is on my mind 24/7, I still can’t bring myself to genuinely believe that there is anything wrong. I recently got back together with my girlfriend, and I told her about my struggles primarily over the summer. I told her I am ok now, though not much has changed. I am lying to her about something that drove me to break up with her in the first place, and something that she deserves to know about. I cant stop myself from purging. I just purged tonight. I just can’t and sometimes I want it all to stop so badly. Food is always on my mind and no matter what I do I can’t change it. Recovery is very intimidating and I don’t feel I qualify for it or deserve it. But I love my girlfriend so much and I don’t want to lose her. I am losing myself again and I’m always tired. My hair is falling out. I see my weight going down on the scale but I don’t see a visual change in my body and that’s all my brain wants to see. But my heart wants to better myself for the people around me because they don’t deserve to deal with this bullshit that I’m dragging them through. The only people that know anything about this are my girlfriend and (very vaguely) my therapist. I don’t know what to do. I cant help myself and I feel no one can help me.",3.891652446744097,5.297404529531568,4.749967523531679,84.64347608300766,71.93279022403259,7.670633566356582,27.32322342709309,8.186683628785799,1.7319561952991689,1948,69,387,29,37,631,224,491,0.147,0.818,0.035,-0.9904,0,0,2,0,0,0,50.0,0,0,2,8,35,19,2,5,17,1,36,18,5,3,2,74,71,32,0,6,10,0,6,0,5,1,5,0,0,1,22,33,7,2,9,1,0,7,16,15,0,2,17,10,81,4,63,53,12,60,0,6,4,1,24,22,0,5,28,285,103,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06843970495446144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11655340069944592,0.0,0.0,0.0476278115944481,0.0,0.10715678889784568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11526957179017487,0.18704431761991056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156323741299136,0.058478276412941975,0.08538825834864278,0.0,0.0,0.07890812952244089,0.0,0.061942360041471224,0.0,0.15559145303163022,0.0,0.07818486489580688,0.0,0.08010409027053768,0.0,0.14389533823914524,0.22227074462474652,0.0,0.07343284732369304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220545057835716,0.120646164029289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605377818522596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28666284726674546,0.0,0.0,0.06203231942701645,0.0,0.0,0.09251804141215292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602499692786125,0.0,0.1062389922103486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05957374903037903,0.08468946280571706,0.0,0.05411069640754637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796076999420544,0.0,0.05601528083771189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299461772306306,0.09388914224306127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21930244622163425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153962822205264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840839178242965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05881374935156858,0.15670779877088942,0.15290812010525182,0.059543265302014835,0.06321145862445096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143555156365875,0.0,0.16770947566707628,0.0,0.10297104745388573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720274304970875,0.07973800712134531,0.0,0.0,0.04745913281006019,0.05326657400045809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584364392802863,0.0,0.0971101842170285,0.0,0.07317414236026416,0.0,0.0,0.07895660856628313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449336142308251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06915345105093135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07088155504264139,0.16743214242478416,0.0,0.07306424890132346,0.0,0.0,0.05793563415529975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783637445978844,0.06926874732402914,0.0,0.049572809208073235,0.0,0.11186386433823248,0.11710875061794733,0.0,0.14643652654075762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05265938411398943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131878181553535,0.0465297149004873,0.0,0.20643407395556446,0.0,0.08167870444816794,0.08049765104650214,0.0,0.13384741209369014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557632621415195,0.20654926983235766,0.05559240236296578,0.0,0.17057329091529164,0.0,0.06492534136155531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137406095835662,0.04975253641301987,0.07657486672843866,0.0,0.04510176841491659
mentalhealth,zigzag7833,2020/01/21,"Every day from ~4:30-9pm I (19F) spiral into an intense panic attack I’ve only been back at college for a couple weeks, but my anxiety has manifested differently than it usually does. Pretty much every day from 4:30-9pm I spiral into an intense panic attack and am unable to be productive, speak to anyone, or get myself out of it. I don’t even know what I spiral about, but I feel so helpless for those hours I would do anything to fix it. I’m in talk therapy and have been considering medication, but I’m scared of dependency. Nothing seems to be working and I’m just confused why this is happening. Part of the issue seems to be me not being able to lean into uncertainty, but I don’t know how to be fine with so much being unknown. Please leave any advice!!",5.806133333333335,6.021761213333335,7.351333333333336,72.04233333333336,66.86666666666667,9.6,30.0,9.444778638647367,2.7056000000000004,602,20,108,11,9,209,98,150,0.196,0.73,0.07400000000000001,-0.9678,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,2,4,4,0,16,1,0,2,0,24,26,11,0,1,7,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,6,8,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,2,10,1,23,17,3,12,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,5,6,77,16,2,0.1455121846938747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14219282278811607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989532754172644,0.0,0.1113164230064501,0.0,0.0,0.10174550286477127,0.0,0.11974412956140232,0.0,0.0,0.3310822338206453,0.0,0.11188988809846427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610064646777861,0.0,0.1876866424097188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15202926231532726,0.0,0.0,0.12733869341491824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610942563220584,0.0,0.245200582987308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357533273317336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602411070860711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286759443634236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433001907259695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15187691556795366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993938247073206,0.0,0.0,0.15407639328997588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14658821742082928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21393639719311208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962286569909615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066857348986082,0.0,0.34145439277322753,0.0,0.1575755159645839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15972868230491347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803820440836327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568308168443064,0.0,0.0,0.2649376557796993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695718215334483,0.0,0.0,0.1664058647100889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026111363369605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672109740175055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313021137137264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593460349889618,0.0,0.0,0.10336768105799173,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymous10983,2020/01/21,"i don’t feel like myself i’m not me
i don’t know what’s going on with me. tonight upon reflection of aspects of my day to day life i am getting these weird awful feelings of what feels similar to dread. my stomach falls into a pit. i am feeling as if my identity isn’t me. being in my house is overwhelming because i have this horrible sense that i am not me. that my life is not who i am. it’s this weird feeling that i dont recognize myself. it’s this sense of wrongess like my life and identity is wrong.  being sorrounded by my things is overwhelming me with these bad feelings because im feeling a very strong disconnect from my identity. thinking of doing normal things that i would do or talk to the people i love gives me that same feeling of dread and wrongess. why do i feel this strange disconnect like i’ve lost my sense of self. this feeling is scaring me a lot because i feel like i’m totally and completely not who i’ve always been, and if i’m not me then who am i? am i going insane? am i dangerous? i don’t know what i’m feeling. i’ve read about depersonalization and derealization but i’m not experiencing any sense that i’m experiencing life outside of my body, i just feel like i dont recognize my reflection and my surroundings. also, im not experiencing a disconnect from emotions, i am experiencing way too much emotion. this feeling is making me feel so emotional i feel like i’m gonna explode. i keep balling because this feeling is so scary to me because it feels dangerous and foreign. i don’t know what to do. the prospect of going to school tomorrow and continuing on like my normal self feels so wrong to me. i can’t express how distressed i am about this.",2.6722239089184083,4.7442373647058815,4.54800759013283,81.99038899430742,76.82352941176471,7.798861480075903,29.203036053130933,8.654491914285503,2.4160711574952556,1344,62,266,29,31,457,129,340,0.126,0.76,0.114,-0.8281,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,2,9,23,2,6,6,1,33,7,2,2,1,57,73,19,0,5,12,0,19,7,0,2,4,0,0,2,28,11,0,1,25,2,0,4,15,14,0,0,2,23,50,9,29,67,4,17,0,3,0,1,9,6,0,4,13,177,78,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05770520608821979,0.06004173543273606,0.0,0.0,0.0490703222013778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06024941666013463,0.21993606304340535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015193724471509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565691888220706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930726545139994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691386828148195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435061370499993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6932255662408259,0.20620047209710765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03769989009271037,0.06922110396907462,0.12302818526904273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326133582346225,0.0,0.0,0.1558873402491702,0.0,0.0,0.06413787887664077,0.0,0.0,0.11896943780941675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20387101172909475,0.2467713284995969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876963552999276,0.06134666102594094,0.06512595346460225,0.0,0.0481664256023581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530448734344592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140021391610388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05002568739816105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217812681474445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224334644204625,0.07302835523273453,0.0,0.0,0.15055431332929592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05799834909788702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587793457935463,0.04623631703383015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05953840179002772,0.0,0.05727613771398556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511191265256877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0512593988762493,0.15778820219109382,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kunwarps45,2020/01/21,"Immigrant Struggles Hi 

My name is Kunwar. A 22 yr old immigrant in Canada. I have been through mental health struggles in the past as well this time I am getting a choking feeling. I came to Canada for my Diploma in Computer Science but I kept on failing in school and realized that I was not meant for COmputer Science. I got suspended from College and stood away for a year. Its been years in Canada and I have not been able to finish my diploma even. My Visa is expiring in 10 days and I am not sure where my life is heading right now. I feel stuck and my parents and friends don't know about my struggle because of my habit of compulsively lying. I want to talk to some people who are going through a similar struggle or have been through a similar one. Thanks",2.6297999999999995,5.034265046666668,3.7286666666666686,86.141,78.53333333333333,6.666666666666668,30.0,7.793537801064563,2.174,607,30,115,10,15,196,93,150,0.184,0.74,0.076,-0.9538,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,0,4,6,0,15,3,1,0,1,22,28,9,0,1,5,1,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,5,0,1,2,4,5,1,1,11,2,18,4,23,17,1,20,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,2,8,83,22,5,0.15765823621057587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812510271161253,0.0,0.0,0.09610699746312408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803190215915393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016765196153602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413177810684693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594334826560631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218063622081266,0.0,0.08236992131629436,0.0,0.0896008088739495,0.0,0.12609369385156755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618028347542988,0.16758333266034695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866448435022561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113586747434969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15888242048735976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16543579793307353,0.0,0.10683330108350947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750608137174962,0.0,0.15050262586426674,0.1093003699651852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13463927229386435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15955855201662406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6592744790412974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485910218198822,0.0,0.0,0.126719718278215,0.0,0.1451505218506405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919317853883374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299091250104673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175368834630914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20305347018258724
mentalhealth,bendonahue17,2020/01/21,"Just had a bit of a revelation... It’s good to set goals for yourself, but don’t do it under the impression that everyone else is already at where you wish to reach. Compare to your standard and yours only - other people have their own problems, own circumstances- they are NOT YOU. 
I was anxious because I wanted to be like everyone else. I was depressed because I wanted to be on the same level as everyone else. At the same time I wanted to be unique...isn’t that funny? But in reality...there is no norm. Everyone is at different stages in everything, and we all have strengths and weaknesses. It’s impossible to fit in with everyone.",3.2735000000000016,5.8378446833333335,4.830000000000002,78.245,77.16666666666666,8.333333333333334,29.16666666666667,9.075114841892004,2.981166666666668,502,23,88,13,12,168,77,120,0.105,0.7090000000000001,0.187,0.8385,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,4,2,2,2,7,0,0,5,0,14,1,0,0,1,18,18,6,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,12,4,19,12,6,14,0,1,0,0,7,11,0,0,2,70,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16518256343477158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691029219060995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18249476844724355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341868028909184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289245980324133,0.0,0.0,0.15639033310455502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751311098618145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.715158411404963,0.1345284021036353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554977361354985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312916930555023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384318261301173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377363893637416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322958150016926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728329013620276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648665886855097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17213186734197464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kingbumi88,2020/01/21,"Likelihood of Recovery I was put on Psych meds at 19 (I'm now 31) after a panic attack.

The meds were prescribed by the family GP and he didn't monitor me on them.  Fast forward 5 years and they stopped working so he prescribed me another one.

I suffer from Chronic Fatigue after a bout of Glandular Fever that I never fully recovered from. I thought the meds might be contributing to the fatigue so I weaned off early 2018.

The withdrawals were very tough so I went to a Psychiatrist and he prescribed me another med + an antipsychotic at a low dose to help with my trouble sleeping. I had a terrible reaction and developed Akathisia. It sent me into a month long spiral of terror and involuntary movements.

I stopped taking the meds and refuse to take anymore because Akathisia was the most indescribable terror I have ever experienced, worse than any panic attack or depressive episode.

Ever since then I have what I can only describe as brain damage. I can't handle any mental stress. By stress I mean anytime I have to concentrate, like right now my feet are twitching, ears are ringing and I am heavily agitated because I have to focus while writing this. 

I have no respite, I can't exercise because of Chronic Fatigue, I can't take medication to ease the mental side effects, and I am deathly scared of seeing a mental health professional. The power they have frightens me and I don't trust them enough not to send me to the psych ward. I'm too scared that if I say something that alarms them (I'm not suicidal) they will have me admitted. If I get admitted I will be given medication. There's a chance that the medication will cause Akathisia and I will die. That isn't a dramatisation. I will die.

I don't know what to do because all the traditional advice like exercise, diet, medication and meditation has no effect on me.

I have to live with family because I can't support myself. It's not much of a life worth living.",3.708230919765168,6.234634750684933,4.997142857142858,77.81,75.46575342465755,8.007045009784736,29.88062622309198,8.841846274778883,2.8460818003913886,1544,71,268,35,35,511,189,365,0.239,0.716,0.045,-0.9968,1,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,6,4,9,25,2,9,23,0,36,21,4,3,4,38,53,20,4,2,6,0,0,2,0,6,16,3,0,0,10,14,1,3,7,2,1,6,14,21,0,1,10,5,46,4,34,35,4,32,0,7,1,0,17,11,0,5,19,185,56,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219878963523612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11440576690515065,0.17640937130518106,0.0,0.0,0.08342210124397356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913919307329608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563866797054967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390311174640507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641199319372288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07245040480478612,0.0,0.174601671117572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691601385882508,0.0,0.0,0.15217845234997918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15859725978513564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04394799794258654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941312364118761,0.0,0.0,0.05638228465044736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04622885809676759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941478066640132,0.08219126528349244,0.0,0.1485548441549909,0.07444146923384215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162877587523824,0.4671787058878159,0.3389587128383822,0.2543124059283411,0.08923552886734712,0.0,0.0,0.067141902103788,0.0,0.06183614813808539,0.0,0.06487671389296609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570002935681938,0.0639752598841087,0.0,0.1973878656549152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456146717058305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183600964047028,0.0,0.06689372793152867,0.1684328751618574,0.0,0.06703087271006984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958298560001383,0.0,0.08417839425110951,0.0,0.0,0.0647578731172545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065223634285215,0.19271295741796765,0.0,0.0,0.09201105132359882,0.09545570726686252,0.0,0.0,0.1897380025229672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678001448968475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940586704466206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797790011113258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061238647755614224,0.0,0.0857230671294124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054169005792494916
mentalhealth,user-105,2020/01/21,"I feel lost and empty I’ve been having suicidal thoughts for around six years now so since I was 14 and i think it’s getting really worse, I feel like I’m really close to doing something stupid. I don’t like talking about my problems with anyone because I feel like me being depressed is just silly but I don’t know anymore. I feel like I’m stuck in a tv and everything is two dimensional. I feel like everything is getting harder and I have no one anymore. I try to make friends my age but it’s hard because as a gay guy in the closet, it’s hard being friends with other guys because most are homophobic around my area and when I try to be friends with a female they just think I’m flirting. I feel misunderstood and alone and I just wanna be happy again or just okay. Ultimately, I’m posting this because I have to say something to someone, thank you for reading.",2.2879159663865565,4.508415600000003,3.730991596638656,86.64818487394962,78.71428571428571,6.174789915966388,26.294117647058826,7.285733465282438,1.3752621848739506,690,28,136,9,17,227,97,175,0.15,0.642,0.20800000000000002,0.9431,0,1,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,1,1,11,17,1,0,4,1,16,1,0,1,0,34,36,13,1,2,7,0,8,5,3,0,0,1,1,2,5,13,0,0,10,2,0,0,3,4,0,3,5,9,21,13,17,27,1,12,0,2,0,1,9,6,0,2,10,86,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11792009411179408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258283791935283,0.07961050275399363,0.0,0.0,0.20271129640039606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776213375655545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806368603165468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046521949661516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34541296062776883,0.3253539351283543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638937285486648,0.0,0.11896973339414416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254699452322464,0.0,0.12120143372312694,0.20398455930382003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257207586649476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27812054518611856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428686815149567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599951615733541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715152050902338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904221954361636,0.0,0.0,0.10894445997920926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388643949520763,0.0,0.14587766217203182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905425656494194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418255248415304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964695045908296,0.17530325067358812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453957811211287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151284145003792,0.0,0.10482296577825884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14590817896589875,0.0,0.09038865126773156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15460099620483564,0.0,0.111220405218737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602861244598354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733192918796665
mentalhealth,strangegeneration94,2020/01/21,"Are there any similarities between bipolar disorder and schizophrenia? Do they share anything in common? 

And is it true that people with bipolar disorder are more prone to developing schizophrenia?",9.474999999999998,13.579648500000005,7.583333333333332,58.50500000000002,64.0,9.333333333333334,43.33333333333334,9.725611199111238,5.738333333333332,165,10,18,4,3,49,25,30,0.161,0.7040000000000001,0.135,-0.2359,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,4,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593676794560791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31386284973251466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8742436519779239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264417388587922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,krypticollier,2020/01/21,"Does my 27 year old brother have mental health issues? He has had girlfriends since high school. Multiple, all of which seem to run away after about a year or two. I remember when his first cheated on him, he had violent rages and even burned all of her stuff. He tends to latch onto his childhood passions for coping with his anxieties, for example he is severely obsessed with snowboarding, and we live in the Midwest. By severe I mean paycheck to paycheck and thousands of dollars. Starting his own “brand,” which he does extensive labor and makes products at no charge to please people. Has a degree in photography, and is amazing at media and graphic design but ditched all of that and those ambitions for his current girlfriend. He has a solid livable wage job but no financial goals at all. Every single dime is spent on immediate gratification. Sold his motorcycle to please his girlfriend. He even bought the last ex new tires for her car, over $2000 worth and she drove off. Today, his current gf at 27 said she needs to break up because she’s going off to university. He had a childlike RAGE. Bloody hands from punching things. Screaming, nearly crying. “I do all of this stuff and you’re being so mean X. You’re so ‘mean’ X.” Last time she brought this topic up, he offered to go back to college too and actually applied to one. Has never mentioned or at all shown plans for having his own place. His gf today and him talked and now he’s practicing snowboarding moves in the living room with her. She has an uncomfortable and sad face she’s wearing and he is in pure bliss denial.",4.358508158508158,6.672671037037038,4.638063973063974,82.15572843822845,72.63636363636364,7.128153328153329,28.25809375809376,8.012643519586192,1.9900563066563064,1266,50,224,19,26,397,180,297,0.131,0.802,0.067,-0.9620000000000001,4,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,0,0,3,9,9,4,1,8,0,16,6,3,1,8,37,32,21,0,1,4,2,1,0,5,0,2,2,1,0,9,18,0,0,5,0,7,7,3,7,0,4,9,3,26,2,46,22,9,49,0,1,0,1,44,22,0,3,19,147,35,6,0.0,0.0,0.1165967074864387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140301960245258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225680128143248,0.09187389748040646,0.0,0.07283481272568433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312448160928153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091181296704091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15783280629726934,0.0,0.10066831599512982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163090190405652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135808178523275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700324609501812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623876354861155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470764255525282,0.11856695133353913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947867371291202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21100870501444408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975482828664167,0.0,0.0,0.3904511384223991,0.0,0.0,0.12040924851533814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269899244711458,0.0,0.08859401746961043,0.09215149773146894,0.11539597614770072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537573411554045,0.0,0.08096375584170835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283342719469346,0.0,0.12483273598136617,0.2623096122832471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135349246696684,0.0,0.1136542664159712,0.0,0.0,0.12092165567206772,0.0,0.10877146916253552,0.0,0.2699601693394803,0.0,0.09883633055532604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456961987007161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735554610224156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603470291522356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793781987476348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967062283749449,0.1373264065157657,0.22650898065290895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671606305792137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538843358385397
mentalhealth,tvgaming24,2020/01/21,"Help this guy I just found this and I don’t know what to do
 https://www.reddit.com/r/Parappa/comments/erpggm/next_life/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf

Find help for him I can’t do much",17.6794,24.38729284,7.143500000000002,54.97925000000001,60.6,4.1000000000000005,10.25,5.985473137389443,-1.6763999999999997,191,1,24,1,4,43,18,25,0.0,0.769,0.231,0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,2,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,16,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6734691033725726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840511291701049,0.0,0.0,0.34075883492286124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077252201813219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4166241974480495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707988690322851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284621468518668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Verymuchhuman_beans,2020/01/21,Endless anxiety Now the title mostly explains it I’m in high school and just got done with some really hard classes last semester. Like the classes that give loads of projects and lots of homework. During that time I had lots of anxiety and didn’t really have a will to do many things. But even after I’m still feeling the same way. It’s been a while sense I finished the classes and I’m starting to get concerned. Is this normal to happen after long periods of stress? Or should I look into this.,2.5983673469387725,5.059480673469391,3.644244897959183,86.39004081632655,79.0,6.3689795918367365,25.106122448979587,7.554174236665415,1.4642742857142859,398,15,74,6,10,128,70,98,0.084,0.873,0.043,-0.4391,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,6,0,9,0,0,0,0,18,20,7,0,2,3,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,7,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,3,3,1,12,13,5,15,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,5,12,53,10,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231816184755087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21616221260505825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13951580048870255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680452385360624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11035925552757496,0.20263161197653065,0.0,0.0,0.1689403845215058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867904970133029,0.0,0.1892211023900478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22317669643428614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218110855842933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319658769672953,0.0,0.0,0.18693240897476449,0.17738048050481442,0.0,0.0,0.3591613568780359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21415464582186344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20696111183409532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706394262828688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21377661568955653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14951008589400536,0.0,0.1686890074702562,0.0,0.2419639062847429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033220595177612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317024506821675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676649958943122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whitecamera,2020/01/21,psychogenic death My dad has diabetes and dementia. He's 77 years old and recently went under surgery to amputate a toe. The infection is in his bones and spreading. My dad refuses to get another needle poke and will only take a low dose of oral antibiotics. He doesn't want to deal with doctors anymore after multiple bad experiences with doctors and hospitals. I'm really sad because he's ready to let go and theres nothing I can do about it. I keep breaking down every time I look at my dad and I don't know how to handle watching my dad rot to death.,3.0812727272727263,5.242660036363642,4.790909090909089,80.30636363636366,75.9090909090909,8.763636363636364,30.09090909090909,9.3871,3.0838363636363635,444,21,83,12,10,150,80,110,0.162,0.816,0.022000000000000002,-0.9384,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,8,8,2,1,0,14,17,8,2,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,1,9,0,2,1,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,1,2,9,0,15,14,0,13,0,2,2,0,10,5,0,0,5,45,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23433273759196474,0.0,0.0,0.22162688087988489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18659206346455084,0.1362281200664055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23039263198635546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.457471707405211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18828709685734346,0.0,0.0,0.2186011655747808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167563218822024,0.0,0.12700583798813295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19863460642848801,0.0,0.0,0.1228158662254453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22851805041548054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18766248810245964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21443002881234047,0.0,0.23449913470406475,0.0,0.0,0.1699626009194932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316363325413042,0.0,0.22065433386187128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16802518380016926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030991112386742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318111846969089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20716331189802056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391039802563513
mentalhealth,shmcknig,2020/01/21,"Going public with my mental health I’ve been on a mental health journey the last 4 or 5 years mainly dealing with anxiety, but I believe it has been present in me long before I was aware of it.  A lot of it stems from a highly legalistic Christian background that made me just dwell in fear most of my life.  While I still consider myself a Christian, I am way more open minded and welcoming to others and feel like my view of God is night and day different than when I was younger. 

Over the last year or so I’ve been going to counseling and got back on medication for anxiety, and over the last half a year I’ve been writing articles on my Medium account talking about a lot of these life/mindset changes I’ve been going through.  Last week, I reached a point where I actually opened up fully and publicly about my anxiety and what I’ve been doing to work through it.  A year ago I couldn’t have imagined doing that.

If you feel like you’re in a place where anxiety has you locked up, it doesn’t have to stay that way forever.  You can get out of it.  If you need someone to give you permission to get help for yourself, let’s talk.

If you want to read the article I wrote, I’ll post it here, and you can get to my other ones through my profile there.


https://link.medium.com/FWzMBUu6p3",8.982438502673793,6.419227721568627,8.490124777183603,75.48192513368986,61.98039215686275,11.782531194295899,38.08377896613191,10.018931242160765,3.4934313725490203,1019,38,207,16,11,325,139,255,0.048,0.8640000000000001,0.087,0.8608,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,7,0,1,11,5,0,2,13,0,21,4,0,1,0,33,35,17,0,6,7,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,14,13,0,0,3,1,1,4,2,2,0,2,11,3,26,3,36,22,5,44,2,0,1,0,17,18,0,8,20,141,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.10806004121726882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815867431179287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33884366989600107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514731987332114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422615611087584,0.1247588718690617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714148895559792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141402520282486,0.1141615016281845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569306617838945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12460611014000918,0.11198049256255414,0.15821624287037284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17356124085745855,0.10622578004737812,0.1887974071297107,0.0,0.08856379294549309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23540932336105325,0.0,0.0,0.07422241243005867,0.11699615097507482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36105072427020624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323263057353955,0.1564288635128277,0.10819770833765484,0.0,0.0,0.09799577057986274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18828353051676364,0.0,0.10477883023590268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155247404848026,0.22318689160276944,0.0,0.11180939126330684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210757735575873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391600262095488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503596784135161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569306617838945,0.0,0.10467906473256,0.0,0.10605219994423117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076358774457302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382423828318458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802730710590158,0.08843201329327331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800698114077068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531355906069196,0.17579038928611596,0.08882383194168497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061539539512473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852352872029207
mentalhealth,sneezy_33,2020/01/21,Slowly I'm slowly killing myself. I've been having a hard time recently with having to switch providers due to my insurance & it's made me really depressed. I know this sounds stupid but my potassium levels have been low already & my dr wanted me to take a supplement but I have no motivation to do so. This is gunna sound messed up but I hope it makes me sick so I need to be in the hospital. I'm tired of having to be okay & strong. My whole support team is gone now. I miss them.,1.5739603960396025,3.6830557524752514,3.3034554455445537,89.3676584158416,80.5841584158416,6.812277227722772,20.991089108910888,7.908726449838941,0.9125318811881188,385,11,82,7,10,128,68,101,0.22699999999999998,0.628,0.145,-0.7812,0,0,0,1,0,1,13.0,0,0,1,3,3,10,2,0,3,1,12,3,0,3,0,11,24,5,1,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,6,0,0,4,3,14,4,10,18,1,9,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,1,4,51,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22420821528623364,0.0,0.0,0.6604187588722475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749939789665332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182004527490368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20179821411987567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247825839877052,0.0,0.11165944266605643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19224871215642647,0.13562061829503766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065138606138007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015884665797334,0.0,0.2006103991127646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305601200531788,0.0,0.0,0.15276200831046627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847273888249307,0.2335193061035435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983763883888288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268371769518597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hornysasquatch69,2020/01/21,"I hate myself I got a girlfriend and shes literally amazing but ever since I did I've seriously started to hate myself because I'm wondering how the hell could anyone love me, I'm not interesting, I'm clingy and annoying,  I'm insecure and I just hate everything about me. I want to talk to her about it but I dont want to just vent to her. I just feel like trash most days now, I feel like nobody could love me because how could somebody's love my stupidity ass, I want to cry, I want to scream, I slammed my head into my bedroom door, I want to know what anyone sees in me but I just cant find it, I live the most bored life so how could anybody be interested in me, all of her friends seem more interesting, funny and just better than me, I feel like I'll never see what she sees in me, I want to just break up because I feel like she would be better off without me",1.36268861892583,3.1635170271739166,3.4453069053708454,89.63933503836321,79.81521739130434,6.503324808184144,22.780051150895144,7.510576382923642,0.8180093350383628,679,22,153,10,17,231,92,184,0.22399999999999998,0.518,0.258,0.5932,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,14,24,6,1,3,0,11,6,2,3,3,43,39,11,0,11,11,0,4,4,2,1,1,1,2,0,4,5,0,0,8,0,0,0,5,10,0,0,2,8,36,14,20,30,4,12,1,0,3,4,12,6,2,4,9,98,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523658687588866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19925142484760525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19272132157083136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34796253665449645,0.0,0.11968048259580692,0.07026609904126001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769288144227955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855482578328696,0.0,0.0,0.0979205268172562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203609825588788,0.311346074104948,0.0,0.0,0.09958167400362973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417732966421122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714019730582982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32270755602092305,0.11181789123990277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059878083730398074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695719422960988,0.2129170248700752,0.0,0.09620808044024294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29500480373288923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403178158769467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26046588909379936,0.09918732266591834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012759582439353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771179633627311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757282712568856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3855821595263528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502744298876834,0.11815559973336474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739755607147157,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EnceladusXD,2020/01/21,Severe diarrhea? How do I follow someone home without their knowledge? My friend asked me the other day and it really got me thinking.,3.765000000000001,6.9601155000000015,4.738333333333333,75.34,81.5,6.533333333333335,28.83333333333333,7.793537801064563,2.733433333333333,108,5,15,2,3,35,23,24,0.096,0.773,0.131,0.2406,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,5,1,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,12,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465552849527804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390714024152057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2864025828810149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29648336055214275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3718432110611808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374804781861806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4187864823274888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31409365545764106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375301577786029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3573424230177337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,redditfox36,2020/01/21,"Idk anymore... I have felt lonely and depressed for years, I have anxiety, I have suicide thoughts, I started drinking. I bought a knife recently and started to cut myself and even tough I never liked pain, I laughed after acidentaly stabing my finger when I was playing with my knife...

When I was about 7 I went to the hospital after almost killing myself, if only my parents didn't find out about the ""acident"" and take me to the hospital I wouldn't be here. Im such a lucky guy am I not?...

When I was 12 I decided that I wanted to feel happy, to have friends I could trust, that I didn't want to cry anymire and that I would have a carrer and that I would find someone to spend my life with but look at me now... I am 20 now, I failed college I can barely speak to people because of my social-anxiety, Im becoming a drunk, Im cutting myself and I enjoyed it because I feel like I deserve it and I lost the most important person to me about a month ago and I can't stop crying because of that and I feel worse everyday because of that too... Its a wound that shall never heal now, no matter how hard I try and that was definitly the trigger of me giving up and losing hope... 



I just want to die, I feel the urge to actually kill myself sometimes and... at this point Im so bad that I don't want to get better... Getting better takes too much effort and I've tried for years embracing my sadness hoping that one day it would get better but then I lost everything I spent years looking for.

And with that said I don't deserve to get better since Im giving up do I? I don't want a future for myself anymore, because that everytime I tried to get one I have failed.",3.4883333333333333,4.335666093567255,4.8037573099415205,86.00282894736843,72.2748538011696,7.337426900584796,27.992690058479532,7.492282038375204,1.510114619883041,1292,47,269,14,24,430,159,342,0.204,0.6459999999999999,0.15,-0.9572,1,2,1,0,0,7,46.0,0,0,0,10,17,30,4,0,13,0,27,7,1,2,2,54,59,24,4,13,5,1,7,2,1,5,4,2,0,2,17,19,2,1,9,3,3,1,11,15,0,2,14,12,54,15,35,38,2,30,0,8,2,0,8,6,0,6,25,187,71,3,0.0,0.0,0.07729127710693233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020920232139863,0.0,0.07931095293365739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118105680343015,0.0,0.15709735427718888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661316880493596,0.24140886199840386,0.08747414077241178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28019655041659997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323762055108545,0.0,0.17400284567483196,0.05107976222380802,0.0,0.0682179347044765,0.0,0.08220082021407946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758936359481235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052313223207893285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118307825397348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601908565594734,0.05658305943972493,0.0760478657274601,0.0,0.14478128996366602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061192495990964386,0.0,0.2069030298807788,0.15195859836910502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842400497116896,0.0,0.08431369272764525,0.07095085811284696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573340691560866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4277673348422535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17525407134275606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055943836875754833,0.07738974521253739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302213278879654,0.08860855602205077,0.17292014606601153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321954868288032,0.0,0.058223750818595564,0.0,0.12217338037285876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734080272562296,0.060237898093672713,0.08427820241685667,0.0,0.08794621190048271,0.0,0.0,0.054909795594070304,0.06915751844078608,0.0,0.0,0.07487299198110832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820398843740094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534075008905085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551802686257308,0.0,0.0,0.08073808411795769,0.06710894349847403,0.0,0.07833437424275395,0.0,0.11212141517745501,0.0,0.0,0.06621774647587222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663587054062741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910248306590107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287880213086626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16132211256485046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335816429150684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342252003293187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071522321867547,0.16879187039456248,0.0,0.0,0.15301354257918712
mentalhealth,dnfidn,2020/01/21,"Dont feel anything anymore Is it unhealthy to almost miss being depressed? I'm sure it probably is but at least when I'm depressed I can feel the sadness and understand what is going on in my head, now I just dont feel anything most of the time and it has been slowly driving me crazy. Someone else has to be able to relate to this right?",3.669857142857144,4.6812462714285745,4.704285714285717,86.2707142857143,72.0,6.742857142857144,29.714285714285715,6.742157984588678,1.5342285714285715,269,11,54,2,5,88,50,70,0.222,0.7559999999999999,0.022000000000000002,-0.9335,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,11,1,1,0,1,11,19,4,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,1,3,4,1,8,16,2,9,0,4,0,0,0,4,0,2,3,38,9,0,0.20648913990780846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20676904632320828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20478174150148612,0.0,0.0,0.33984593625833964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3556975872621894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4840074682421667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724951802852599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132213403255291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735253675370405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119174296637171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22263021723251789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17634059724377604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17495757816129992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19461357066451604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040547802191907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21496247687467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skimmilked,2020/01/21,"Is this healthy? When I’m really upset, I talk to myself in my head. I feel like there are 3 of me. The one who comforts me, the one who tells me all the bad things, and just.. me. I even rub my own arm while the good part of me tells me it’s okay. I call her Gracie. I often disassociate really bad and talk to myself out loud just venting my problems. I know where I’m at but I daydream as if I’m somewhere else and just talk for hours sometimes. Life is just extremely hard for me and I’ve gone through years of torture and it still effects me and still sometimes happens. 

I know I don’t have split personality or anything like that. I’m just wondering if these are healthy coping mechanisms.",0.6936445907034141,3.049931552447553,2.3787001234060057,92.99076511723572,86.62237762237763,5.3227478403949,21.698477992595638,6.794906146795322,0.4807477581242292,544,19,119,7,17,178,85,143,0.109,0.782,0.11,-0.21100000000000002,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,12,11,1,1,4,1,6,3,2,1,1,24,16,13,0,3,9,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,8,7,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,5,0,2,1,4,23,6,12,15,3,11,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,5,8,81,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351469806651557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742497389023921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16769679986729435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719277065077748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847211245537096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303942837735327,0.1173256704566561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13774801004613318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14522770701704374,0.0,0.14711747791637822,0.0,0.16854696622060347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617330901839738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18051260391253726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160002345995034,0.16046858959973698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225724761411133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778446700257442,0.0,0.0,0.14339896602493132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15714556277988753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104193946476308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248545790502557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26230796689985303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3960046332047698,0.2870878461252548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10910685937929997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781000129425432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575848819895778
mentalhealth,sparklejoint,2020/01/21,"Prozac. About a month and a half ago, I went off Prozac (fluoxetine) cold turkey, for sexual purposes (ex. cannot cum). This fucked me up, i was taking 40MG a night. 

I’ve been insanely irritable, irrational, and HUGELY controlling of my friends and S.O. This IS NOT me. 

I went back on the meds after consulting friends, but i feel like i’m gonna fuck myself up more and lose everyone.",2.8866602316602297,5.158175581081082,4.319343629343631,82.92391891891893,76.97297297297297,9.093436293436293,24.08494208494209,9.606745405546679,2.3472725868725868,299,10,60,9,7,99,57,74,0.162,0.7140000000000001,0.125,-0.594,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,2,6,2,0,4,0,4,4,0,1,0,8,12,5,0,0,2,1,1,1,2,1,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,4,2,8,3,8,7,1,12,0,1,0,2,4,5,2,0,6,35,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20684939071647104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17943061436416466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617202162926696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22297451853140307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798802714632732,0.16670423510015756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3605689879286163,0.4314539082014424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400230394041455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610573147024805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591976100594676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862565688549126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189817861594052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17544905254885446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43263284673584657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway3-1-4,2020/01/21,"my MOOD is so unSTABLE AHAHAHAH I was damn near ready to drive my car into a tree this morning on my way to work and now I'm like happy as fuck???  WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME BRUH I DONT GET THIS IM SO SICK OF MY MIND.



And like, it's been getting more noticeable?  It used to be long periods of one mood before it'd switch and stay that other mood for a while before switching back.  And then at other times it seems WAY more frequent and random like today (except today's not exactly random).  WHY AM I ALWAYS GOING BACK AND FORTH DUDE THIS SHIT IS TIRING AND THE TASTES OF HAPPINESS FUCKING SUCK WHEN IT GOES AWAY.  EVERY TIME.",1.8486745406824168,3.8580965905511846,3.3107283464566954,90.17638123359579,79.15748031496062,6.1230971128608935,19.24475065616798,7.1686216300943375,0.331541207349082,485,11,101,6,12,159,89,127,0.187,0.6940000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.9224,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,6,14,5,0,3,0,9,6,1,1,1,17,18,13,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,12,9,1,0,1,0,0,3,2,6,0,1,2,1,8,5,15,14,2,24,0,0,0,2,0,5,5,3,16,65,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114046315069253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480756249028268,0.24237791610617734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26822147067961066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18471255903222933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13278949363186296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29140762722210506,0.16468481504925578,0.0,0.08957087976937941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355481285356945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17024106525458402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309943675857405,0.0,0.0,0.13947597349924512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15913670151813974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794349906884554,0.0,0.0,0.10679761585834377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14347819538757015,0.0,0.0,0.16177985693625355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679865718763253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18380215534856026,0.18114442268403594,0.29878331177631257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612061311052204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501999375321065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14221451662487694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473873500079512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17231695391480312,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,autumndaniel29,2020/01/21,"Self help advice This is my first post (18F), but I’m struggling a lot so here we go.Some background info: I have clinical anxiety and depression- and I’ve gone through some pretty life-altering and stressful situations(not gonna go into detail). I’ve tried LexiPro, but I’m not really a pill person so as of right now I’m not taking medication. For the past few months I’ve been extremely anxious and depressed even though things aren’t necessarily bad right now. I’m in an amazing relationship, I have supportive friends, and I have awesome plans for the future. I smoke daily, which really helps, but it’s not financially sustainable. My s/o is also extremely supportive and understanding but we’re long distance and he just went back to college...I’ve done a lot of research on why I feel this way and different things to help, but my mind constantly goes to dark places for no reason. Im working on graduating, going to college, becoming financially stable, etc...I’m worried about myself for the next few months without my s/o. Does anyone have any tips on combating this?",4.496305555555558,6.966696375000005,5.617333333333335,74.57922222222223,72.75,9.044444444444443,30.11111111111111,9.586721724236666,3.2688777777777784,865,38,147,23,18,286,130,200,0.14800000000000002,0.688,0.16399999999999998,0.5506,2,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,0,3,11,9,0,2,7,0,9,3,0,1,0,28,23,18,0,0,10,0,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,7,10,0,0,4,0,0,4,6,5,0,1,4,1,11,4,19,18,5,25,0,2,0,0,9,8,0,3,11,86,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122300938442385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992050194062672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436019202179489,0.0,0.09490009077925964,0.14014441037358005,0.0,0.08674063716266496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538898440179124,0.10357894814286288,0.0,0.1370066265985005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13405706037619503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136930760301862,0.0,0.0,0.12960882505173962,0.0,0.0,0.1085594851003058,0.12694913588236906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835171975197774,0.08193573752105156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272484838187628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551929092301238,0.0,0.0,0.09584292426120557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115062805334094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24945003150143302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399836568443835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762219670457516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097828686233602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21093059396699976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497019545445222,0.0,0.0,0.1252580151090709,0.0,0.1980356028339025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319316134307257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184224822934504,0.0,0.10831816376622236,0.12960882505173962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880833902119785,0.12620634635680153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15894286465823462,0.12754699087626792,0.0,0.1331863355247392,0.0,0.21188091234504894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941417757607734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14210212065923242,0.1296869736864311,0.0,0.0,0.2815474084024073,0.0,0.0,0.09327230470785357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648304027549332,0.0,0.12188129537296676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422374217525885,0.0,0.0,0.12914339191329954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846737822485543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499823487543664,0.11193840202913542,0.0,0.0,0.11958252066055172,0.0,0.09031195233543934,0.12598169094564618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,m71973638,2020/01/21,"i need some advice this is going to sound really weird but i’m going to explain myself. i think that my diagnosis / treatment is wrong. i don’t really see myself as someone who’s depressed or anxious. (i’ve been diagnosed with depression / anxiety). i don’t spend all day feeling sad or feeling anxious, or really a huge amount of anything else associated with either of those disorders. i personally feel like i have more of a mood or  personality disorder like bipolar II or borderline personality disorder because yes i feel depressed at times and yes i feel anxious at times but the real problem is that my mood fluctuates so much from sad/angry/happy/sad/anxious and over and over again like a rollercoaster and that’s what i really need help with... but i don’t know how to approach my psychiatrist or therapist about it because i don’t want to seem like some annoying person that just googled their symptoms. i’ve been looking into it for the last couple of months and really feel like i identify more with different disorders than i’ve been told. and whenever i subtly bring it up in conversation, they label it as “anxiety” or something else but it honestly doesn’t feel like it. how do i approach my mental health providers about this without just being shunned or pushed off?",7.592142857142857,8.078118550420168,8.095462184873949,67.30100840336137,63.07563025210085,11.673949579831936,37.588235294117645,11.35114627814755,4.646013445378152,1037,49,171,29,14,344,126,238,0.177,0.6629999999999999,0.16,-0.7642,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,0,9,17,1,0,5,2,14,4,0,2,1,48,35,23,0,4,16,0,7,6,0,0,4,1,0,4,15,11,0,0,11,0,1,6,6,8,0,0,4,10,22,7,28,30,8,21,0,4,2,0,11,9,0,11,12,115,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08888350953927031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391658756351544,0.3082713529280541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748510246399866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089480997212446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006437551380282,0.0,0.05866065228860514,0.0,0.23502704632878402,0.0923208756455626,0.0,0.09503218321636676,0.4169848912754097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519681668930838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3219391501223781,0.1949421276087373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338752573388617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966845407744382,0.0,0.0,0.060967507645947536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049988365617882766,0.07414324754420172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26662611983540835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638215937676429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166468775916853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726021383357277,0.0,0.06686490016815509,0.13488902304124398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31768551502825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703491808555508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353058856974556,0.29135144595874884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248207960713231,0.08280512403181196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706876909040854,0.07002423099540342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454061959811833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560972938197632,0.0,0.0582824790114751,0.0,0.0,0.10607716545248956,0.0,0.0,0.0869146626037626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536496292837303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876806653277811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09944874692043576,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Regnes,2020/01/21,"I'm inescapably angry all the time about how I was treated in my youth. Sorry if this is rambly, I tried to just get to the point as quick as I could without listing off a ton of specific incidents, more an overview of how I feel.

I have mild tourrete syndrome and in honestly kind of an Aspergers case as well. For most of my childhood everything was ok. Adults didn't really understand my condition fully and it showed at times, there was another kid in my year who I'm pretty sure now was full blown autistic, in the earlier days before he was really struggling to keep up with the class, the teacher wanted me to coach him on coping with his disability, kind of messed up, but whatever.

Until I got to grade 6, before then my teachers showed me respect, I was a straight A student with no record of misbehaving, no reason to give me a hard time. My 6th grade teacher took one look at me and saw a special needs student. At the beginning of the year everybody got to choose their seats, and then a week in he would make tweaks, I got put in the corner of the room with the teacher's aide and two legit special needs kids. 

My school had a traditional program where seniors (6th/7th grade) get to read to the Kindergartners and Grade 1s, everybody would be assigned their own ""little buddy"" and we would get to read to them for like half an hour once a week. I was the only one in class who got excluded because there weren't enough Little Buddies to go around, even though one girl in my class had two little buddies for some reason. He just wrecked my self esteem over and over with mean stunts like that, I got him for Grade 7 as well. 

I went into his classes with Straight As and left with Cs, he threw me into a downward spiral that took a solid decade before I started to show signs of recovery. On the last day of Grade 7 and heading off to High School he told me I was going to be assigned a special needs aide next year to follow me around in each class. That was never true, it was purely out of cruelty that he said that to me.

No teacher in high school was ever as awful to me, but the damage was done. I had no motivation to do anything in school and my grades got worse and worse. I would just sleep in classes, never do my homework, and just barely scrape by with good test scores and make-up assignments during Summer. Every year would be progressively worse, and teachers for some reason just failed to see how ill I was. By grade 11 I was an alcoholic and regularly drinking during classes. In Grade 12 I finally broke halfway through and just dropped out. None of my former friends or classmates knows to this day what actually happened to me. 

I bounced back a bit the following year and graduated through an alternative education program. And then just kind of floundered around for 3 years mostly unemployed and just playing World of Warcraft while being severely depressed. I finally got a full time job at Tim Hortons when I was 22, I went back to school on the side and upgraded all my high school academics. I eventually became manager of the store, and then got headhunted by the CRA to work for the government instead. I know I should be happy with what I've made of myself, but I'm just not.

I'm still damaged, and I am hateful of so much around me in this world. I hate how much hate I have in me all the time. I'm constantly reflecting on my life and who I am and why I am the way I am. There are two people I always remember. The first is my 6th grade teacher, the defining moment in my life where it all went wrong. And my rage just intensifies when I think of it. I can't wrap my head around how awful he is, I wasn't his only victim, how could somebody be that cruel? I can't just move on because I don't accept it, I can't accept that he got away with it.

I often feel like I will never move on until I inevitably publicly confront him and call him out. He does not deserve to have his name unsullied. Wrappin this up, the 2nd person I think of when reflecting on my past was my high school Spanish teacher. She was a really kind person, in my last class with her she gave us all personalized farewell cards. I don't remember most of what she wrote to me, but it opened with ""(Name), I don't understand you..."". Ironic, that she of all my teachers was the closest to ever understanding me.",6.440294579830884,6.033206133645956,6.649632585867156,79.71324362076278,65.62368112543962,9.698026988600937,32.568631363647704,9.138037386147262,2.6178725848694206,3404,123,676,52,47,1096,353,853,0.129,0.795,0.075,-0.9953,5,0,2,0,0,0,87.0,2,1,3,5,45,39,7,1,44,3,59,9,3,12,14,138,117,57,0,13,20,0,3,3,1,7,5,1,2,8,25,52,2,1,21,8,1,13,20,15,2,8,46,7,100,24,128,56,22,137,0,5,3,0,49,69,0,8,56,471,125,46,0.0,0.0,0.048358665203926864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05295937067096519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04123384368342863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05196288183589227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04077965530073478,0.2205728907187413,0.0,0.0,0.04655868237672095,0.0762096828463467,0.0,0.06041670300512979,0.0,0.12650331479118307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05410137483130381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050601335375506006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05355149820837973,0.0,0.07913148895940869,0.0,0.0,0.0958768911267908,0.0,0.04268176680161543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04336603425091947,0.050712110228901035,0.0,0.04854516832832551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05120370334498503,0.0,0.03273070055950607,0.08965091682970798,0.041752340137201686,0.0,0.044536961715697744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05011313236791532,0.03540219970584665,0.0,0.1085704604848893,0.0,0.04215157413534197,0.0,0.0,0.03828617584524647,0.0,0.07767154115857078,0.047537802831378255,0.0563266526023134,0.04156449770758177,0.3567039293707871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04382144390590942,0.05275236470840075,0.0443916690451832,0.14677631478323944,0.10171573424182173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20943089161981804,0.0,0.0,0.048801827728331686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04917582689421822,0.04404688260133404,0.0,0.2064161973426371,0.05446841452736394,0.08078810122565447,0.0,0.0,0.05384180124263736,0.0,0.07000451742969269,0.07263041029402202,0.14900179733835406,0.0,0.0,0.04161383421926116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04689026873170734,0.06615687737081201,0.0,0.0,0.05398007167471408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533853612438177,0.07285745502323418,0.1102335183105074,0.1146599296730959,0.0,0.052702450288241116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052774603498117086,0.10073952978964792,0.07537782931106235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04730598545554642,0.03435529235564335,0.12980890234167494,0.0,0.0,0.046845622010119034,0.0,0.0,0.05041538962473436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04981659980923744,0.0,0.0,0.09913709445577357,0.0,0.0952388688976314,0.1528528024013178,0.0,0.0,0.11227261983139493,0.0,0.04713828320792949,0.0,0.0,0.351067109185834,0.03948902818733415,0.0,0.05169681536471231,0.05598319939266612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049590925031283636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554729186252832,0.03507538095958517,0.0,0.03957479634456408,0.0,0.0,0.051805788665886185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04670513007112294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350586155878947,0.04868767040306846,0.0,0.14447999420306634,0.0,0.0,0.04735205695056919,0.11011516094073352,0.033644685073240074,0.0,0.14522450433675188,0.15476593551869072,0.059608728132512064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029228903675340787,0.039334561072686,0.07950028340931949,0.0,0.08911203881888807,0.1378143251452126,0.044715803247440115,0.0,0.0,0.047769383596331774,0.0,0.03607672986498936,0.0,0.15150275435707852,0.17601273725154418,0.05418076290887374,0.0,0.1914713006233933
mentalhealth,meganholmess,2020/01/21,"i need some advice this is going to sound really weird but i’m going to explain myself. i think that my diagnosis / treatment is wrong. i don’t really see myself as someone who’s depressed or anxious. (i’ve been diagnosed with depression / anxiety). i don’t spend all day feeling sad or feeling anxious, or really a huge amount of anything else associated with either of those disorders. i personally feel like i have more of a mood or  personality disorder like bipolar II or borderline personality disorder because yes i feel depressed at times and yes i feel anxious at times but the real problem is that my mood fluctuates so much from sad/angry/happy/sad/anxious and over and over again like a rollercoaster and that’s what i really need help with... but i don’t know how to approach my psychiatrist or therapist about it because i don’t want to seem like some annoying person that just googled their symptoms. i’ve been looking into it for the last couple of months and really feel like i identify more with different disorders than i’ve been told. and whenever i subtly bring it up in conversation, they label it as “anxiety” or something else but it honestly doesn’t feel like it. how do i approach my mental health providers about this without just being shunned or pushed off?",7.592142857142857,8.078118550420168,8.095462184873949,67.30100840336137,63.07563025210085,11.673949579831936,37.588235294117645,11.35114627814755,4.646013445378152,1037,49,171,29,14,344,126,238,0.177,0.6629999999999999,0.16,-0.7642,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,0,9,17,1,0,5,2,14,4,0,2,1,48,35,23,0,4,16,0,7,6,0,0,4,1,0,4,15,11,0,0,11,0,1,6,6,8,0,0,4,10,22,7,28,30,8,21,0,4,2,0,11,9,0,11,12,115,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08888350953927031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391658756351544,0.3082713529280541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748510246399866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089480997212446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006437551380282,0.0,0.05866065228860514,0.0,0.23502704632878402,0.0923208756455626,0.0,0.09503218321636676,0.4169848912754097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519681668930838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3219391501223781,0.1949421276087373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338752573388617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966845407744382,0.0,0.0,0.060967507645947536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049988365617882766,0.07414324754420172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26662611983540835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638215937676429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166468775916853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726021383357277,0.0,0.06686490016815509,0.13488902304124398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31768551502825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703491808555508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353058856974556,0.29135144595874884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248207960713231,0.08280512403181196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706876909040854,0.07002423099540342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454061959811833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560972938197632,0.0,0.0582824790114751,0.0,0.0,0.10607716545248956,0.0,0.0,0.0869146626037626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536496292837303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876806653277811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09944874692043576,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zeofas,2020/01/21,"Game Therapy - Resource for anyone wanting to tune in for mental health support/discussion DrDyaus does some really awesome mental health support as part of his stream. He also is willing to chat/help with anyone who tunes into the stream, and is available for call or text as well. I've been enjoying tuning in to see some of the work he does. [https://www.twitch.tv/drdyaus](https://www.twitch.tv/drdyaus)",11.042076923076928,12.772747015384615,7.267500000000003,71.90125,55.769230769230774,9.576923076923078,34.71153846153846,9.516144504307137,3.4107692307692297,336,12,46,5,4,91,48,65,0.0,0.8220000000000001,0.17800000000000002,0.9117,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,7,7,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,3,14,5,3,3,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,3,0,29,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565471721930807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27375633901006835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998902564094456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34261734958374745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41616205762923697,0.0,0.0,0.1312121008551752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3945549595027154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21198625567471188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540724325962016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559933529648893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4442864976739558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238657190253648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546282339930113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600946849021654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251376430310095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Speedygonzales24,2020/01/21,"I went through a traumatic break up, and my brain is now in lockdown My girlfriend I was with for almost a year recently broke up with me. I’d say it was really traumatic. she was groomed and taken advantage of by someone who was really close to her, I didn’t see it coming, and he drove a wedge between the two of us. I went from being her Superman to being Lex Luthor. The whole thing was emotionally draining and heartbreaking.

It was a really important relationship to me, and while we dealt with a lot, 95% of the relationship was actually amazing. But I was going through my fb post history and finding old interactions between the two of us, and it’s like I barely recognize her. It feels like it’s another life that isn’t mine. And when I try to look back at our relationship, it’s like my brain tries to block me from seeing too much. It all feels so distant. I don’t want to wallow, but this doesn’t feel right either. I don’t want to stop feeling or remembering.",4.2296447076239785,5.48097578756477,5.682801628423388,78.87358808290155,70.91709844559584,9.659363434492967,29.32975573649149,9.957137785484203,2.8589351591413776,769,30,153,20,14,260,111,193,0.07200000000000001,0.843,0.085,-0.1641,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,4,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,9,0,16,3,2,0,1,31,31,14,0,2,4,0,4,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,12,14,0,2,6,0,0,5,5,2,0,2,13,8,25,5,26,16,5,21,0,2,3,0,16,6,0,3,11,112,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.12289229377133006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610355646889632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13205157158189787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683458686337583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28116541407750445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847999783244633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416575040807816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547017275513762,0.08996645188728067,0.0,0.0,0.11510034175131476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157053973231932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895009493139812,0.18457328548969945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575187545518927,0.0,0.0,0.10706360410341753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257513341600357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13214533995752176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060885748171928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420274216763637,0.0,0.12434349490489638,0.4056142496096087,0.14265736782242958,0.10754596424229608,0.0,0.1001468554303592,0.0,0.0,0.2007043508036335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106702493577485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528549996049258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366418855067544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17100027490124994,0.0,0.2460361877854131,0.0,0.302963421265034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485569133033973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23348202382100744,0.0,0.1405995276481156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109662534371043
mentalhealth,AriIsMySavior,2020/01/21,"Being watched??? Alrighty. For my first post imma talk about this weird feeling I have literally 24/7. First of all, I fucking hate it. Anyways, so all the time I have this feeling that I’m being watched??? This feeling has been persistent for about 6years now I think. I don’t really remember when it started.  And it’s not that anxious feeling you get like in public where a stranger might be watching you or something creepy, it’s like, people I know, the people change over time as they come and go irl but it feels like people I look up to or want to impress or just don’t want to disappoint are watching me. Like, when I’m laying down, when I shower, use the restroom, walk, in class at school or just doing anything. It kinda feels like I’m always putting on a performance because of this, always perfect posture when I walk, never slouching or laying down on the couch in an unflattering way, never eating food messily or impolitely even when I’m alone. Because the people are watching me. I know no ones actually watching me cause the technology my mind makes up to make such things happen don’t actually exist that I know of. I thought that maybe this is what being paranoid is so I googled it (I know I know, not the best method of research) but all the symptoms aren’t it. It says symptoms of PPD are things like being quick to anger, defensive, and thinking that people are going to hurt you. I’ve never felt that someone would hurt me, not even strangers on the street! And I’ve never just been quick to anger with people unless they straight up do some wack shit like continue talking to me when I’ve said to stop, standing too close or touching when I’ve repeatedly said to stop or just straight up being a dick/homophobic/sexist. So if anyone wants to take a shot and guess at what the fuck this is I’m happy to listen :)",4.399502704952145,5.970113960674155,4.7994132334581785,84.13743029546403,70.91011235955057,7.071826883062839,28.63462338743237,7.526774132740827,1.6678494798168964,1454,55,276,16,27,460,172,356,0.149,0.718,0.133,-0.9478,2,1,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,3,2,6,25,22,7,0,15,0,26,7,1,4,8,67,67,28,0,5,19,0,8,7,0,2,2,4,2,0,25,8,2,3,16,0,0,6,12,11,0,3,6,19,27,11,39,53,5,52,0,3,7,2,12,20,3,13,30,187,52,3,0.0,0.0,0.16911374057800485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974217424780663,0.0,0.0,0.14419772577070855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788864331649567,0.0,0.060586956480302025,0.0,0.0713046981167391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564078428862643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093272113391156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901233425439753,0.09166309373474668,0.07464039301550872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866350186000446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446162089079315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628738582138533,0.1238040461145546,0.08319657481109949,0.0,0.0,0.1474070953616791,0.1047762472827227,0.0,0.0,0.16021110536029118,0.04527049704671384,0.0,0.09848918364108944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545358093624234,0.0,0.07662337520283519,0.09223941234267524,0.0,0.0855478934215659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855189737869164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380999683622333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963260813382254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276329004259582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11567768620120925,0.0,0.08705051086915422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09192083678825776,0.08749073281523878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673160300525093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871556708935416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3604288067762051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298573657322128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710612153055829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05550953243428501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815636258834176,0.0,0.164845976705556,0.06890671827017288,0.0,0.0876933575074037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894389605331801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341736924312649,0.06670659053766216,0.0,0.0,0.06133056869187845,0.0,0.0,0.14488479448577207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18012286064583932,0.06514922245215582,0.1392902783054988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11513141665786875,0.11104228943816792,0.0,0.06878958292216697,0.1010513923630172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074836867163177,0.0,0.0,0.15332337687630246,0.0687778987379468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061552923887496114,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kinniebread,2020/01/21,question hwo do i tell if i had a breakdown or if its just normal to be paranoid at night to the point of yelling at your mother and needing to keep a weapon in your room incase of energencies and hearingn footsteos and doors openign when they arent th ere im nto sure if thiis is the proper subrecdit to psot this in but i just seqrched mentla health and hopes for the ebest,2.481818181818184,4.494315363636368,3.105194805194806,92.39207792207796,77.18181818181819,4.919480519480519,25.285714285714285,5.288315135182226,0.4353688311688311,301,11,62,1,7,94,58,77,0.042,0.887,0.07200000000000001,0.5023,1,0,0,0,1,0,0.0,0,2,1,0,3,4,1,0,5,0,5,1,0,0,1,17,8,10,0,6,7,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,6,3,11,6,0,8,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,6,2,41,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33177763437736546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100136866776209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371519702656265,0.0,0.0,0.2774338467428262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314390729356904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29291113054731704,0.3058193220924446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950619964404496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3496549689414695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941770934287013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728137662124639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AllHailThePig,2020/01/21,"Has anyone heard of someone having an addiction to constant home renovations? Sounds silly probably. But my mum has always renovated her home. But not in any way that’s normal. She usually starts a project and then quits because she’s moved onto the next. She has half finished balconies. Knocked down and then put up the same walls a bunch of times. Changed the door placement for the entrance to a room multiple times. Always finding crazy wierdos to do work on the cheap that needs to be redone. Never had flooring. 

This isn’t even the  beginning of it. And it isn’t just me. So many people have shown concern. Builders who offer her advice she tends to not hire because she hates hearing the truth. 

Now that Nanna is gone it’s just me and her. And she doesn’t really have any friends that are mentally sound either. I thought I’d try and make a post cause it’s something that deeply stresses me out as it’s worse than ever and I don’t want her to go broke. She wants to cut a giant hole on the lounge room so that she can have it ready for a stair case into another level underneath. (Her house is on a hill on stilts so a basement floor could be possible after a lot of excavating. 

I have no one to offer her advice other than me. She scoffs and gets super defensive when I try to help her. But she has been listening more lately so I think maybe if I can get a professional mental health person in to maybe give an intervention it may help. I dunno. 

Has anyone had anything similar in their life?",2.518259887005652,4.948904447457629,3.4849999999999994,87.59111581920907,79.10169491525423,6.374011299435028,23.39265536723164,7.554174236665415,1.1367943502824862,1192,40,232,18,30,381,175,295,0.064,0.863,0.073,0.1358,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,3,10,9,3,1,20,0,27,3,0,2,3,37,45,20,0,6,9,1,0,0,1,1,3,5,5,1,16,10,0,1,3,0,1,4,8,5,0,2,6,5,30,4,33,35,5,43,0,1,0,0,30,21,0,4,16,161,46,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12975677077862766,0.0,0.2326232044387982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19807964964916847,0.0,0.0,0.16188459843419625,0.12480996809122635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16645259900992784,0.0,0.09794890693187668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14511525357777275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227330139451688,0.1259145620757476,0.0,0.0,0.1286256756069401,0.0,0.09503320700366848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861607262924604,0.10766654651875222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10878833026505336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195980316626023,0.0,0.12437317088780785,0.11418134339141102,0.06764566807690421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11751431353441183,0.0,0.12651991247435218,0.13415184362067073,0.0,0.159562297537106,0.0,0.2387871516654751,0.0,0.0,0.1373409355206709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342674042497097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407214224795519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011923209379738,0.0,0.0,0.07945130699008733,0.12067448368463032,0.2391568189107436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399020190691124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650664154830765,0.0,0.08825685705403419,0.09180079868701292,0.0,0.12658634214281292,0.0,0.11662098301687535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065563375462086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251818973809942,0.1039296024829706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341848223084086,0.11399476336013707,0.0,0.12833101179915174,0.0,0.0,0.11965479998281454,0.0,0.12659964311056962,0.0,0.0,0.07625160991967497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085101342698297,0.09163263853412808,0.0,0.0,0.08424777502100719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363447864937547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626756133147643,0.0,0.09449397632249706,0.13881095758510975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162275540037307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109119387816426,0.0,0.1404101699587028,0.09447792614483723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08665292116602634,0.0,0.12129846837439286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,T1H2R304WaWayRA,2020/01/21,"Tips for finding a good psychologist Hello, I was wondering if anyone could share some tips for finding a good psychologist.
I am new to seeing a mental health professional for myself and I'd like to make sure I find one that will actually help me work through my many shortcomings. 

Any advice is appreciated and I thank you for your time!",6.929761904761904,7.893323841269847,7.596944444444442,68.64875,64.55555555555556,10.744444444444444,31.62301587301588,10.686352973137794,3.475701587301588,274,10,48,7,4,91,48,63,0.0,0.685,0.315,0.9617,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,1,0,6,0,0,3,0,5,1,0,1,1,11,9,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,9,6,7,6,1,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,3,3,30,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.1994280826597024,0.0,0.0,0.19970043177743632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138973342248543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14289484135063785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16316663264622966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5603502001106664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3428187295733517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172275221685285,0.0,0.0,0.1369797127093709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998410757523565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641339306179542,0.2071912520892137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20594908795947292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973743407159019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13848115388951407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16285025949921178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19260900815144308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881493087799428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916527515843307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22162214958136925,0.14877815661923235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nyan_pop101,2020/01/21,"I don't know what to do I have a history of depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, the works. I've been in therapy and on medication for just over 3 years now and I just don't have anything left that I can make myself do. My therapist gives me advice, and sometimes I follow it with bad outcomes, sometimes I can't bring myself to.  
I just went through (almost a year ago, hah) a bad breakup and it's resulted pretty much in me losing all of my trust and all of my happiness. I was doing good before it happened. I was doing really well. I hadn't self-harmed in, geez, like 5 years. Now I'm back at it. I was really happy with who I was, and now I can't stand myself. Nothing changed. Just I had a relationship, and then it was gone. And I haven't been the same since. And it makes me feel like the stupidest person alive. It's not that I think I'll never date again or something; I understand what's happened to me. I understand everything so well. But that doesn't really make a difference.  
I just feel like there's nothing left to do. I can't seem to make friends, and I'm not sure why. I've done the whole 'keep your feelings in and explode' thing. I've done the whole 'talk too much about your problems and everyone thinks you're crazy' thing. I'm a good student; it's not like I can't get out of bed in the morning. I have to. But, it's all I can do. I can't stand the way I feel and no advice my therapist throws at me helps me at all. I just kind of feel like a lost cause. I don't know what to do. I can't kill myself because I'm afraid of dying. I can't drop out of school and burrow away. I can't get myself to take practical steps to get better. I don't have any moves left. No moves but trudge along my miserable way through school, using really bad coping mechanisms to make myself feel a fraction of a bit better. I just don't see things ever improving. Not in a way that matters.  
I kind of just want to quit therapy and pretend like there's nothing wrong with me like I did before, but I suppose I was miserable then too. I just wish I wasn't miserable. I wish I had the motivation to do anything important. Anything at all.  
I don't even know why I'm making this post but I guess I'm just going on a limb. I'm just trying to grasp for anything I can find, 'cause I just don't know what to do anymore. Hah, I wish someone had a magic wand or a genie or something and just wish me out of this. I don't really see myself improving any other way. Maybe I won't get anything out of this post. I probably won't. But maybe it'll make me feel that fraction of a bit better to post my feelings out here in the world. Who knows. Not me, that's for sure.",1.1607547169811312,2.9782847021276595,3.1218908069048577,91.63386792452832,80.52482269503547,6.597029305499799,21.81172219991971,7.6368930633389525,0.7718135688478518,2068,63,468,33,53,696,200,564,0.087,0.7559999999999999,0.157,0.9848,0,0,2,0,0,1,68.0,0,2,0,8,29,35,1,4,23,2,53,1,0,12,9,105,110,28,3,6,27,0,8,7,1,3,1,0,1,1,29,25,0,1,22,1,0,9,30,13,2,0,20,10,73,22,57,87,12,57,0,6,2,0,10,24,0,6,21,307,102,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207123149982104,0.05083174444454853,0.0,0.057421448440933914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799138676274056,0.0,0.043867785897596365,0.0,0.05686955770396857,0.0,0.0,0.23594496194821415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387630896201556,0.0440937781024911,0.1436388232082403,0.03495619711951085,0.0,0.0975905577576599,0.0,0.0,0.15214757083929656,0.12520897228562938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11781558507795001,0.060662048180590365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049390058692861234,0.0,0.05951372395781876,0.05991197838823704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736506186756418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03787498369517559,0.05187067424678999,0.0,0.054794378191668575,0.05153683453086978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23195764696795865,0.12289908682472693,0.0,0.0,0.052411117691491683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04430361284974642,0.0,0.11983889965372302,0.05500931774648498,0.032589755374130516,0.09619437690377253,0.0,0.0,0.06317056832622757,0.0,0.1014177176206715,0.12208690428609545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03843628418124785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096972969814171,0.0634423257408701,0.11942931216151315,0.15757303363972866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18691234614514,0.0,0.0,0.19610670217310056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641529504165946,0.06259744010410515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679416306765927,0.0,0.11521894078266096,0.0,0.0,0.05776776115555416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189459039934555,0.08430845884462868,0.0,0.044227009022341376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16506852664162314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050070321091367165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647582864115657,0.058339174761970126,0.061826224802663136,0.05487019191689693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060992100702370815,0.0,0.0,0.18367926467521092,0.0,0.0,0.06156569085771186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606980435606527,0.09139103491014187,0.052203565503005325,0.05982200214355965,0.0,0.0,0.047435314572351006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048587144605948325,0.08829198850452173,0.11342880309345668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272471820563527,0.0,0.10809154767150704,0.0,0.04311533803077999,0.04609070689948255,0.0,0.0,0.13115507394238826,0.13316094843185336,0.11428985090678535,0.07348707574145265,0.0,0.04552450526732968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03893261912501866,0.0,0.0,0.11939366169247405,0.0,0.04952655923521596,0.0,0.0,0.03382280950933903,0.18206709099627685,0.0,0.0,0.10311777504343683,0.05315819937255185,0.10348756916060532,0.1280444224371619,0.2637697742922424,0.0,0.0,0.04174690831708694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269635164193793,0.0,0.11078241933778092
mentalhealth,HospitalSuck,2020/01/21,"How to support my girlfriend the best My girlfriend is in a psychiatric unit for one more day, she’s been in hospitals for about 2 weeks.

She hasn’t always been open with her feelings but right before she did what got her admitted... she gave me a cry for help, and she’s started to open up more. What is the best way for me to support her as she starts to open up to me about her past, her feelings her trauma.

Obviously everyone is different, but what are some good ways to be generally a good support without knowing what specifically she finds helpful (I will figure that out— but for now I’m just looking for help) 

Thanks in advanced",5.4109000000000025,6.060208120000002,5.70215,82.01082500000003,67.8,8.81,32.425,8.841846274778883,2.538860000000001,505,21,100,8,8,161,74,125,0.052000000000000005,0.691,0.257,0.9846,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,3,5,9,0,0,5,0,10,0,0,1,1,20,24,6,0,0,5,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,5,3,19,8,22,17,5,18,0,0,1,0,20,9,0,1,6,74,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13083744122410354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13380085010360454,0.0,0.3300302967502895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17272229451588472,0.10140769480413213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16428379597217127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025089622193927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901195292588954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14371579101772744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637732522622265,0.12576031193040296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161867879295544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641576127376821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204317382035158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065508421430846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010470862496367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342832965278251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22259254460709407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5353070322951805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447667551581557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24962180881971735,0.1261295665003296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515750985181263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,panicatthewifi,2020/01/21,"I want to kill myself No one gives a shit about me. My boyfriend is probably cheating on me. But thats what always happens to me, im genuinely not worth being faithful to. He already admitted to flirting with other girls and then told me he felt like a piece of shit about it so then acted like i was the person to be angry with in that situation. I hate my mom mostly bc she’s a piece of shit who doesn’t care about anyone but herself and her stupid husband. My dad hates me half the time for things i caused and i feel fucking awful because im literally just a waste of space who gets on everyone’s nerves. Im over it. I hate myself. Nothing ever happens in my favor. Im a piece of shit. A waste of time. No one gives a fuck about me and it shows every fucking day. Im so so tired of being alive. 

tldr: im the worst",-0.2814129870129882,1.9159090171428588,2.144272727272728,93.8571363636364,90.25714285714287,4.5532467532467535,18.811688311688307,6.1124844417494595,-0.10808571428571412,638,19,141,6,22,217,99,175,0.342,0.581,0.078,-0.9957,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,0,9,20,13,0,10,1,6,8,4,1,1,17,23,11,1,1,4,3,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,10,6,0,0,3,1,1,1,4,14,0,3,3,2,21,6,23,17,5,13,1,0,0,3,16,6,7,1,8,94,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759633324505594,0.0,0.08112981531651453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817595164645923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059436563742040614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941020450539946,0.10016183265517316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288098784384552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819651135595549,0.08214998510373671,0.0931677304873878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04930014777612109,0.0,0.09361760337502056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704182188740605,0.050940984610629375,0.1870663910875024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17244211712517274,0.0,0.0,0.2887903296773779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6319160014336808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078719697382601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526950432200113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419364338758407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355619140526664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13214031188642691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513534298244421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512408826537252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4003392881139472,0.0,0.10959679327610086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477626828480097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370887794616776,0.1120646763393322,0.0,0.0931677304873878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575094472222972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Silliminite,2020/01/21,"Wasting my life away and I don't know why. Hello,
      I function very well. I pay all my bills on time. I work two part time jobs and I have no problem getting up and going to either job. I hang out with friends often and am very outgoing. The issue is when I get home. 
       When I get home I am completely wiped. Despite the fact I have a list of things I need to get done or want to do for myself, I have no motivation. All I seem to be able to do is sit or lay in my bed and watch TV. 
        I'll tell myself to get up and cook, clean, apply to a grad schools and I can't get myself to move. It gets so bad that I won't use my phone because it's plugged in two feet away and I can't get myself up to grab it.  
       Most of the time I don't even like what is playing on the TV. I'm just watching it to have something to do. And if I waste my whole day watching TV I'll get so upset at myself for wasting a good day. 
        This has been going on and off since 2018 and I don't know how to change it. I don't even know what this is. I heard recently that depression sometimes presents itself like this, but I don't think I have any other symptoms. 
       Is this a mental health issue? Has anyone seen or heard of this before and know what I should do to stop this? I'm tired of wasting my own time and ambitious.",0.1318296817944713,1.7380585809859177,2.2234898278560244,97.85588680229529,82.90845070422534,5.052477829942619,18.969222743870628,5.82211442006289,-0.4323952529994784,983,24,245,6,27,330,136,284,0.122,0.812,0.066,-0.9223,2,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,3,10,10,0,1,8,0,30,6,1,3,3,41,55,23,0,5,7,0,1,2,1,2,4,2,4,0,19,15,1,1,7,5,2,4,10,4,1,2,5,7,35,6,33,47,7,29,0,1,4,0,6,13,0,7,13,164,54,8,0.10530004394059396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160764077197075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362823907123457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19786571509533976,0.0,0.08792113830462217,0.06418992942651386,0.0,0.08960258167874142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139348420158947,0.0,0.11040509265453932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13581963417279289,0.0,0.0906947735483677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775850434560652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13909937182879142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135455274045009,0.0,0.4951343417392938,0.0,0.11968888322380886,0.08832068093062402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192902265680656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21124905942641514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21981177612737204,0.2089880910954253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23148060126278205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074376535127506,0.10288856511741293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061176774574662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11191728219830588,0.0,0.0780786483299384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11402968617329075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075792096958433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397108989938122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656926616892468,0.0,0.09586120521044814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710528448828883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106511832015795,0.10414443597239913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803555175818542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944706432100032,0.0,0.0,0.09203687969139013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995667023686432,0.0674720163277122,0.0,0.0,0.2456052096891291,0.12102691024748467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057256844702932,0.0,0.0,0.0909454289657884,0.0,0.17376712832742952,0.06210869414622625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094677385529487,0.0,0.09501691128227742,0.11756373857831083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665968610622291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Loose-Anybody,2020/01/21,"That person that everyone thinks is normal but you see that they're a insane physopath That one person that only you can see through but everyone else is oblivious to their bull crap. Frustrating part is when you point out all of the odd things about this person but they look at you like your crazy.


But then something happens that eventually proves you were right and everyone sees it!",8.341478873239437,8.618969873239442,6.622640845070425,79.19621478873242,61.53521126760563,10.480281690140846,31.834507042253517,10.125756701596842,2.9295605633802824,315,10,57,6,4,92,51,71,0.20600000000000002,0.755,0.039,-0.9312,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,6,2,0,2,3,2,0,2,0,5,1,1,0,2,10,11,7,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,9,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,4,8,1,6,10,2,6,0,0,4,0,11,4,1,0,3,40,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15391978886593327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5281850847119933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16293437252934662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001673817666878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472616515361395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18052887825584996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485464202123388,0.14013275495659705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19952810874396454,0.0,0.0,0.482647995286889,0.0,0.0,0.17417869763384036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735110657218726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4404775006943107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14184700744458814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240954592450858,0.1180619210908927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YogurtCupp,2020/01/21,"Do you think tht the TV is talking to you Smart TVs can work this way don't you think?
They have cameras and microphones so they can watch you watching TV and they also can listen to you. They can read text for you, listen to your commands

and they can talk to if you ask them something, isn't that weird?

Does anybody else feel this way?",0.5607246376811581,3.0072372463768176,1.081159420289854,100.96637681159422,89.57971014492755,3.646376811594204,17.81159420289855,5.033348758259628,-0.7929884057971011,266,7,59,1,9,80,42,69,0.0,0.932,0.068,0.5801,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,8,6,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,10,0,0,0,0,7,16,6,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,14,1,5,16,0,2,0,0,2,0,19,0,0,1,0,39,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298725456419898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687256430542328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515482114004249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401264249573193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453426516001352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875263927696602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22129197967021055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4620806008311197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3683709189575661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4563266461860137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20926600800537695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TD_IRE_99,2020/01/21,"I think I might have bi polar disorder or something like it So in the past year or so but a lot more often these days I seem to have been experiencing symptoms of bi polar disorder. 
I have some extreme mania episodes where I'm very excited about something and I can't wait or I feel like anything is possible and I want to do all these cool new things and buy stuff I cant afford even tho I shouldn't. 
And in an instant something could happen or someone could say something and the entire mood in my head changes, I become extremely depressed, I want to go away and be alone, I'll talk to myself and even try and talk myself into taking my own life but thankfully I've been to afraid to do it because I dont want it to be painful. I start hearing things and even smelling things that might not necessarily be there, I havent had any visual hallucinations tho. These mood changed can last for a while and it's really confusing. 
I know I should talk to someone but I'm embarrassed and afraid of annoying someone by talking to them and they think I'm stupid.",3.968349056603774,5.402392297169817,4.7171226415094365,84.84285377358493,71.78301886792453,7.752830188679246,28.34433962264151,8.278499904357787,1.8470981132075468,845,32,171,13,16,272,117,212,0.142,0.767,0.09,-0.9359,1,1,4,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,0,11,15,2,4,5,1,23,6,1,0,1,41,41,24,0,7,8,0,1,2,0,4,3,2,0,0,12,13,0,1,5,0,1,1,6,8,0,0,3,6,22,5,19,29,5,14,0,1,0,2,8,6,0,11,9,117,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141864541225807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497424273384637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072691528231494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358414264411056,0.0,0.0,0.06720779092858624,0.12176321357931015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332612004379264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17605239284242682,0.0,0.0,0.07110256748242913,0.0,0.094958748722918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252713660812995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921297529900125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21845860208187826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05574605623007026,0.07876310748173661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265800190192379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097494311795434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314900451439006,0.0,0.12426052859991585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059089016254041,0.08986901877499402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787331544840974,0.10772582607790017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373118513048496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339170964110703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648079330064518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173144962653986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524674873096464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429107569535812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062940843366415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767576549647721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036807791355748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802451289534829,0.33950543783660125,0.0,0.0,0.07803599842487798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621065081206875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145926702576343,0.08289479013638579,0.3544612799224902,0.0,0.1015040130606108,0.0,0.0,0.2197369576198913,0.14128836742450096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485297435275325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096835699329224,0.1950861218412363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099782290353761
mentalhealth,bbeenn13,2020/01/21,"Struggling with thoughts of hurting those around me... It's funny how your brain can make you loathe yourself huh? 

Let me say first and foremost that I will never hurt anyone... that being said today out of the blue I started thinking of ways to hurt those around me... details like where I would do it. What I would use what I would say... and then the thought of how I would feel afterwards... and this is what keeps me from acting on it... because I know I don't want to... the thought just randomly popped into my head and I ran with it... I am not a danger to those around me so please don't think I am... I can already say that therapists and medications don't help me and I'm cool with that because ever since I stopped taking medication and seeing therapists I've never had these types of thoughts... this is a one time thing that I'm sure will pass... in fact it feels like it is already. I'm not really looking for advice so much as I just wanted to write it down and get people's opinions on what's going on..",2.3692249322493244,4.202862087804878,3.2419105691056918,92.1045460704607,76.90243902439025,5.921409214092141,23.09620596205962,6.691623216298621,0.5126368563685642,788,24,169,7,18,250,113,205,0.07,0.812,0.11800000000000001,0.867,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,0,1,11,9,1,1,5,2,20,4,2,4,5,49,45,14,0,6,4,0,2,2,0,6,2,4,0,0,23,16,0,2,9,0,0,4,7,5,0,2,7,10,23,4,25,30,1,26,0,3,3,0,8,11,0,2,12,120,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491815120881176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369651250095653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507376142528366,0.0,0.0,0.2867391671523493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090030424358196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11985749329043603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711993294079972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857633646447136,0.07670327048455294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132662995850133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609501932967966,0.0,0.06101935057627472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101898969684202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196608481346904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3448169701956528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543305156864336,0.0,0.0,0.0590062985784916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979041004880356,0.0,0.10490854716138603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016154952349448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166855310616124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21632265903752945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789273706986682,0.0,0.165616669256531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275490850987927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443501545175485,0.0,0.0,0.11785713029569148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878228643413421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213095562189466,0.2561485257819179,0.0,0.0,0.08555789288214767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881539785609338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599517700724916,0.0,0.0,0.08976392879969504,0.0,0.11224368693815394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119247545710934,0.0,0.08072690010441498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493235835050905,0.07133010972038085,0.1375933506101866,0.0,0.3409507944847859,0.06260677679378347,0.0,0.1017717124949566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273093480195868,0.0,0.0,0.12665611307798774,0.08522322065911432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050827961269786,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,queenManiac97,2020/01/21,"Depression totally fucked up my life  Just realized that I was supposed to register for the exams of all my college classes yesterday. I can't stand up for myself to go whatever place I need to go and tell them I forgot to register for my exams. I can't lose 1 whole semester worth of work to some unnecessary circumstances. I'm already fucking behind in my studies. I'm mentally capable of understanding the concepts of my studies. It's just a bit hard to do anything when you're going through depressive episodes that make you starve yourself for days in a row. Sometimes I'm not even in the mental state for remembering the plot of a cartoon series for kids. My BMI is down to like 17. I'm not good at doing anything except for mental labor, seriously you don't want me to do manual labour - I'm the most clumsy person on earth. I actually was told by career advisors that nobody will employ me for anything similar to the public service sector. So in order to potentially get a decent job in the future I HAVE to finish my studies at college. And I'd be willing to do it but depression and social anxiety and the lethargy that accompanies depression makes it fucking hard. I'm giving up after 10 years of struggling with depression, social isolation and social anxiety. The worst part is the I haven't even seen a therapist for my problems and even if I did, I'd most likely still get kicked out of college.",5.071383763837638,6.641577125461256,6.588964944649451,71.95702675276755,69.25830258302582,9.700442804428043,33.10719557195572,10.008157457239328,3.7051725461254623,1135,53,190,29,20,388,150,271,0.193,0.7709999999999999,0.036000000000000004,-0.9921,2,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,2,1,2,8,16,3,1,15,0,17,4,0,2,2,29,40,10,0,4,7,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,7,8,0,1,3,0,1,3,6,13,0,0,6,3,23,3,47,31,9,28,0,6,1,3,12,14,3,4,10,135,30,14,0.0,0.0,0.10268939299768097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612402643305085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16100146914050187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259786205749972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11488400927400845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678647057412674,0.0,0.4531726327064287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20851045569625884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918505812367251,0.1099567627453918,0.10094629569720363,0.1794140638786631,0.08826201099319181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885309914647371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442463191718213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432712805074462,0.10282021798043067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772555937608242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048381094023746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181415558269979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780267820018707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139539381776604,0.0,0.0,0.09188285995177699,0.10994305208538786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069098918354284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920518413946153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32180648943340434,0.0,0.0,0.10407525458160784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403688971754597,0.0,0.0,0.11000934309150458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197574114585297,0.0,0.0,0.1221802507865214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055186521258072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954823992841199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062067436389139675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174856429713249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660876237080744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776473101073151
mentalhealth,DiscombobulatedCoat3,2020/01/21,"(Sensitive) I'm struggling with an eating disorder, and I have a toxic parent. Help. Since I was about 11 years old, I have struggled with eating/body image. It started off as I would only eat one apple every day, or, just nothing at all. I never stopped myself unless I was really truly hungry. Basically, I got over it. Didn't deal with any of those issues ages 13 and 14. Recently, within the past year, I have felt it come back more and more. My parent happened to notice I had reminders set for me not to eat on my phone. You know what they did? Try to help? No. At least worry? Nope. They got angry. Then proceeded to tell all their friends without my consent, make fun of me, and accuse me of attention seeking.  It was never about the attention though, so that's what I don't understand. This is a battle within MYSELF. I am so afraid to talk about any of it, and also afraid to tell my doctor. How do I help myself for the next 2 years of my stay in hell? I have no idea what to do and I feel trapped completely.",1.0853510074231174,3.4238567121951284,2.967062566277839,89.66533404029694,84.3170731707317,5.51643690349947,19.15694591728526,6.895973343053719,0.35155355249204634,786,21,159,10,23,262,126,205,0.14,0.758,0.102,-0.8001,2,1,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,3,0,10,8,2,4,6,0,16,4,0,2,4,30,27,15,0,1,5,2,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,11,10,3,1,7,0,0,1,9,6,0,1,9,2,29,2,31,17,5,27,1,0,0,0,15,8,1,1,16,120,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748487936921124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16579490013765644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373501152677297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540549394389467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105007664891422,0.12781178875615876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861661982454772,0.12567547266258072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971010119651855,0.1247717267740416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37420812975144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10270758092304423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061637246931207,0.0,0.11704490953126195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418108041220566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19499211871732944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779741881151686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451247565405636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13761237042080826,0.0,0.12723387853319565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699407834909073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081370443115886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18803647040032853,0.0,0.1296440189947405,0.0,0.0,0.11696812954347285,0.13878608406816068,0.12791550380241706,0.0,0.0826038602388874,0.09271186331507293,0.0,0.0,0.2707151954112569,0.0,0.11636912597842056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809345777329699,0.0,0.12036338777005624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083848446554923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628276921664887,0.1299311711572976,0.0,0.10191541960439132,0.0,0.254876599213308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798010350707582,0.21309521041207694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976796585401665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276336615947442,0.0,0.0,0.12690414313051826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750905015723065,0.0,0.0,0.1237972636673836,0.0,0.08659558911114536,0.0,0.0,0.23550241781173276
mentalhealth,girvjobdey,2020/01/21,"I feel like people know something about me that I don’t? I just really want confirmation that I’m being paranoid because I feel scared. This might be a long thread, so this all started in 12th grade when I suddenly had a disturbing intrusive thought while with friends and began thinking people could read my mind after one of the girls in the group gave me a disgusted look. I’m always afraid I’m my intrusive thought out loud or people can hear my thoughts and now it’s to the point where I don’t feel comfortable anywhere I go unless I’m alone. Now I’m starting to feel this out of body feeling where I’m in the world by myself and everyone is a simulation or I’m on a list of people to be warned about because of my intrusive thoughts. I feel whenever someone looks at me they think I’m disgusting even though I’m disgusted by these intrusive thoughts. I feel like my family is trying to keep this secret from me and a lot of the people I know disassociate with me because they know. I’m scared and I don’t know what to do, I want to cry, scream, run away. I feel like I’m going crazy , please help",3.295793650793652,4.921061357142862,4.3820833333333375,85.81013888888894,73.82142857142857,8.013492063492063,26.73015873015873,8.680891452615391,1.87022003968254,880,32,182,17,18,287,114,224,0.149,0.746,0.105,-0.9004,0,1,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,0,11,13,3,4,11,0,13,1,1,0,1,41,55,12,0,3,4,0,8,3,1,1,0,3,0,1,9,9,0,1,20,1,0,3,3,8,0,1,8,13,26,5,28,42,2,25,0,0,2,0,9,12,0,4,13,107,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702965624357016,0.0,0.0,0.08598762593898678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709185966649338,0.0,0.0,0.18898634208189768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478806780668092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250902977753773,0.0,0.11351475474605426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825546650560932,0.0,0.0,0.09874633545607353,0.0,0.0,0.09742028468299636,0.0,0.4180167450569262,0.2214795542051581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984066177508438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746164562168822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647232382236905,0.0,0.06926700031470685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185383962698876,0.0,0.0,0.2271730809199788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15146093582993855,0.0,0.0,0.09145314534193627,0.17356009001755526,0.0,0.0,0.08785645023225551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962800540024806,0.10434450843430414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07002623921688025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3582166691494759,0.0,0.0,0.11343690437574315,0.0976902336151636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336852732173224,0.0,0.0662026101382098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206923860733458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756012274341728,0.0795566133121749,0.0,0.0,0.14628996320478274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13243291871053156,0.1015315773761408,0.4102043144713558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016145807613494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190588173820688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stanateez_,2020/01/21,"I've decided to mark the day im killing myself everyone in my family keeps attacking me mentally and i cannot handle it anymore, everyone close to me doesn't care, im too young to move away, they won't let me get a job, i ranted on twitter about it and my friend just yelled at me and when i apologized about ranting they just said ""hmm ya k""...so now i know i make other people around me sad 


i really just came on here where no one knows me irl so no one can tell anyone i know about this :)",1.4770964360587016,2.9321904622641526,3.5863522012578635,90.32772536687632,78.33962264150944,7.729979035639412,21.211740041928717,8.515128840125781,1.0326406708595384,383,10,89,8,9,131,72,106,0.16,0.758,0.08199999999999999,-0.8190000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,1,2,0,13,5,2,0,2,0,5,0,0,1,0,15,14,5,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,4,6,0,1,4,0,0,2,5,3,0,2,2,2,19,2,12,10,0,14,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,0,4,58,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17802432077153935,0.1255166045089043,0.0,0.0,0.15980073444831638,0.0,0.20421697584817347,0.16865426241869827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20531004556190074,0.18302100699318305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11576821286271095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430563680642069,0.0,0.0,0.1692247559606741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386879185232516,0.0,0.09378584771098862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3878002380571041,0.0,0.17813461185535534,0.15955551398261408,0.19859969734557986,0.0,0.29595973752754595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18355973132744946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982340121460695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18090247330166004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907892599985368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432793802826706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444867845566053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114997821871009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17075380960720754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156898450569777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TaehyungFantastic,2020/01/21,"Looking for encouragement Hi everyone :)
I have been struggling for a while and I kinda screwed up the thing that was supposed to help so... I'm looking for stories from people who defeated their mental problem on their own so I can calm my nerves a little and make myself believe I can do it.",2.7495238095238115,5.388513,3.853571428571428,84.05809523809525,79.71428571428572,5.8761904761904775,28.97619047619048,7.1686216300943375,1.8757119047619049,232,11,41,3,6,75,44,56,0.19899999999999998,0.631,0.17,-0.2092,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,1,2,6,1,1,3,0,6,1,0,1,0,5,10,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,8,2,7,8,1,4,0,1,2,1,6,3,1,1,1,34,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3420626300075143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901107786837511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035022697862684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042953163663201,0.0,0.0,0.5099090779506789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20266092378380826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059657961839002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21048379434937745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905121771407968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31739735627272325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017038896839406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Marip321,2020/01/21,"You are NOT alone :) Hello. My name is Mari and I would like to share that I have dealt with BPD, PTSD, and major depressive disorder for the past couple of years. I am very open about my experiences as I feel it helps others feel less alone and it helps me cope. I recently decided to create a YouTube channel to bring awareness to mental health and to create a safe space on YouTube for those dealing with mental health issues. Here is the link if you’re interested in watching. Have a wonderful day/night wherever you are :)
[mental health awareness ](https://youtu.be/j_hGngn0LGM)",4.829134615384613,7.643983644230772,4.350615384615383,82.39438461538461,73.13461538461539,7.621538461538463,25.784615384615392,8.548686976883017,2.018399230769231,465,16,80,9,10,140,71,104,0.087,0.6859999999999999,0.228,0.9276,0,2,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,0,5,0,8,3,0,0,0,17,12,6,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,5,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,10,4,14,11,2,8,0,1,1,0,8,4,0,2,4,50,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197809301339615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944354075015433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708178324268405,0.0,0.09956191975291223,0.15915834784128186,0.13296672194748047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17693212853773382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101264328245145,0.0,0.0,0.15611769232640302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4922941416968353,0.0,0.0,0.20695447005658346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113194935936928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542196035279974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4667342723340403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487457729216022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14737257348683905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18046121777083465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243099971857565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273791450816259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674178373286785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966667243238497,0.0,0.0,0.09941525034662492
mentalhealth,emwee06,2020/01/21,"My grandmother brought a print of this across the Atlantic with her when she uprooted her London life to marry my Mississippi Delta-ian grandpa after the war. It hung in my bathroom growing up and, although it took years to grasp every big word and prose, I find myself repeating it often. GO PLACIDLY amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons.

Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and the ignorant; they too have their story.

Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexatious to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself.

Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time.

Exercise caution in your business affairs, for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism.

Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Neither be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass.

Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth.

Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness.

Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here.

And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

- Max Ehrmann 

Read, then read again. THEN read once more. Repeat until your soul accepts the truths it's hearing. You ARE a child of the universe. NO LESS than the trees and the stars. The world IS unfolding as it should and you DO have a purpose. STRIVE TO BE HAPPY.",5.264074516043487,7.716478164677807,4.8890234685759735,80.74085952002122,70.45584725536995,7.996844338371785,31.447958101299392,8.761943790366164,2.813862317687616,1857,83,313,35,36,566,219,419,0.099,0.7120000000000001,0.18899999999999997,0.9926,1,1,0,0,0,0,63.0,0,18,3,4,13,29,4,5,32,0,37,8,1,2,7,66,46,38,1,4,11,1,0,0,0,5,6,5,0,6,18,26,0,5,5,5,0,4,9,13,1,0,2,7,30,16,64,26,12,43,4,2,1,1,37,23,0,8,16,238,48,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528176501560588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974067728280218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13385027043395142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357081507021769,0.0,0.10660563436493598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237962730937218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156446656048854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719090057298695,0.10612601905943507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693836697780089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14260670292478025,0.0,0.0,0.13368420179191196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249285116035553,0.0,0.131759858181595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12938386185240394,0.2681122530310865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419682125542265,0.0,0.0,0.2565598769417683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13474861686283945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.441918874802427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14264176007940554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796879220000042,0.14401702011596748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14333201228492054,0.1080545625036185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104574391068276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951336103603182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405984691992822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377972772039433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405777082998093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137642273058597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196886269786515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16296028277345995
mentalhealth,Akai__,2020/01/21,What will happen if I go to a mental hospital I live in Canada and Im 15 years old. I just feel like I need help. I feel sick and I need to be fixed. I want to go to the doctor and tell them that i need to go to a mental hospital. But im scared of what will happen to my future career. Since it will go in my record people might not want to hire me. Im scared that this will hurt my career and the possibility of me getting anywhere in life. But I still NEED help. Idk what to do. Someone please help me.,-0.5306547619047599,1.293616767857145,2.0625,96.89916666666667,86.67857142857143,4.8047619047619055,14.690476190476188,5.985473137389443,-0.9041988095238088,386,6,96,3,12,133,57,112,0.12,0.745,0.134,-0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,2,4,0,7,3,0,0,0,18,22,7,0,7,5,0,2,1,0,5,3,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,3,0,0,0,2,16,1,14,16,0,11,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,2,5,58,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13799073925325658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13633488113818892,0.09631317103652468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043622986173227,0.0,0.3064780477528115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384361569080861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710946400987383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14432420598214385,0.0,0.4368759366402396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522511477474477,0.06586469378761836,0.0,0.1190457317719502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717273128734253,0.14301935281204264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3998598878492624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414675855501629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346501562478984,0.0,0.0,0.14798839575333225,0.0,0.15198572040261918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.269950333725596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11152187579946272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142298634476316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766489542287264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178358526260631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15903691986847282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681761904981836
mentalhealth,toxic-lemon,2020/01/21,"i’m so tired every day is a repeat of the one before. i feel so lost, like i’ve never accomplished anything. i don’t know who i am or what i need to do to feel complete. i just want to give up so fucking bad instead of trying every day for something that isn’t working out. my family is trying their best and i love them but i’m tired. so damn tired. i have no one but my family and it’s gotten to the point where i don’t feel like depending on them anymore. it’s like i’m on life support or something and i’m too scared to just pull the plug. i don’t want my mom to be hurt. i don’t want my siblings to be hurt or my grandpa or dad or aunts and uncles. it would be selfish of me, but i’m so close to crossing the line. when i was younger all i had was motivation and aspirations.. i don’t know what happened. i don’t know what i want anymore. what is my purpose? i don’t have a big dream, i don’t want marriage or kids, i don’t have any hobbies serious or unique enough to build a career off of. i don’t have any talents, i’m not that smart.. i could go on. and all i’m
told is that it’ll get better and one day i’ll get back on track and just expand and become better but.. i’ve been waiting. i’ve been waiting for years and i’ve heard the same thing over and over, how do i know this time is the one? it’s not. i don’t know where i’m going with this stupid post. whatever.",-0.6828726442033144,1.1710862686084127,1.8165476870359816,98.22597515705313,87.60841423948222,4.670892823148677,18.149723967256804,5.900188976854957,-0.4835700361698079,1063,28,265,8,34,363,131,309,0.154,0.7040000000000001,0.142,-0.8684,0,0,2,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,3,7,15,20,3,1,9,0,35,6,0,3,3,55,72,29,0,8,16,4,3,3,0,2,4,1,0,1,16,14,0,2,9,1,0,4,16,10,0,4,9,4,32,10,25,57,5,28,0,3,0,2,14,14,2,8,12,166,48,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14079473824557184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20532868624146364,0.0,0.0,0.0851884048655757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960073802873371,0.08643514519121975,0.0,0.11433006295707016,0.08808816976500614,0.0,0.10863819170514999,0.18311062541803874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853908852250936,0.0,0.0,0.0826525539435896,0.0,0.0,0.20028613185493527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696416580771888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17444067290235654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19517949384864292,0.0,0.157028956391028,0.07395493903596798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570286999216628,0.10817019166303632,0.09930612615909958,0.1176659697396228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154267925318788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216412924619883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28446030961543456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731194651995067,0.15172440159317732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300466064428072,0.0,0.0934311327059567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12124175049178322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675900738852945,0.07984125449170676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.280592198451258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09786016543170337,0.0,0.09914385323802398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364190202939476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939000352041385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747363513437342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687743023534053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036353250354756,0.3569441465728649,0.0,0.09891810435803763,0.0,0.1405670073695951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30529484147294644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536402765791264,0.0,0.0,0.07353786691871607,0.0,0.0,0.0666636936047131
mentalhealth,RighteousRikey,2020/01/21,"Do I need to admit myself to a hospital? Hey.  I’ve been struggling very much lately, and I’m wondering if I need to admit myself to a hospital, but I have nowhere else to go to and ask.  So, if you could please help me out and leave a comment on my situation, that would be very much appreciated.  [TW for talk of sh]

I am 14 years old, and have been dealing with self harm issues for around 2-3 years, and have been cutting for about a year.  Last September, I was admitted to a hospital for having command hallucinations, self harm issues, depression, and major anxiety problems.  It had gotten very very bad, and my stay helped for a while.  

But recently, I relapsed.  I have been cutting every night for about a week now, and each night it’s gotten worse.  I can’t bring myself to stop, and although I’ve gotten rid of sharps multiple times, I still find ways to cut.  I’m depressed, and I’m starting to feel suicidal again.  I attempted in November, and I’m worried that something like that will happen again if I don’t seek help.  My anxiety is also acting up again, but it’s not as bad as it used to be.  I used to have 2-3 panic attacks a day, now it’s just a few each week.  So I don’t know if I’m considered to be “sick enough” to admit myself into another facility.  

I seriously can’t stop hurting myself, and my brain won’t let me seek help for it.  I feel like if I tell anyone or attempt to reach out, something bad will happen.  I’ve been so anxious over this, and I’m starting to lose all hope for myself.  I think that I might get very bad again, very soon. 

Now that I write it out, it’s concerning me.  But I don’t know if it’s time for hospitalization yet??  And how would I even go about asking my mom about placement?  I don’t want to tell her everything that’s been happening...",3.201451040081178,4.3217633287671235,4.876742770167429,84.17671740233386,73.24657534246576,8.147133434804669,26.12125824454593,8.626192665926032,1.7112962962962968,1385,46,294,25,27,470,168,365,0.253,0.654,0.09300000000000001,-0.9972,0,0,2,0,0,1,54.0,0,1,0,3,22,21,4,2,9,0,34,2,1,3,1,62,70,34,1,14,13,1,3,2,0,6,1,0,0,2,16,22,0,2,11,0,0,4,8,18,0,0,11,3,38,3,44,48,8,44,0,4,0,0,22,9,0,10,31,193,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684703533582324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765159024339096,0.1278925151098401,0.09443310840952254,0.0,0.058448196191756216,0.0,0.0,0.07441298077784868,0.1562910656139426,0.09509589521452057,0.0,0.0,0.2791772290552445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331428384421114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673995552753012,0.0,0.0,0.053908749719952034,0.08617780332992983,0.14399219605926705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982886785961066,0.0,0.0,0.08637099918193382,0.0,0.055210524367786736,0.0,0.0704283303794913,0.0,0.07512546227360134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453141144091246,0.05971684003461473,0.0,0.0,0.07639990854484845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043672418071452536,0.0,0.09501244925699237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22175555566250815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22411493786768455,0.0,0.0,0.08302390797547436,0.0,0.0,0.08948501465588814,0.0,0.0,0.174492857338624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918779517740673,0.06813715189561967,0.09429336198321313,0.08850992928404693,0.0,0.08547662065517167,0.0,0.08167587756720203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351602790767596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867596946311751,0.0,0.09789980647693093,0.0,0.0,0.12289679802673613,0.12396211599085465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688743944289932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771383067824164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807506365107713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175691404480503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998451147264392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253521661478819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17440557248332195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395886262955566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287036061069028,0.0,0.0,0.11833111678485893,0.0890960079735189,0.06675522431789725,0.13977026385307662,0.0,0.08738660366680165,0.0,0.091434087756344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06718661892721907,0.1461230003307543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05356121099080057,0.0,0.0,0.09748421028879388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439015089829985,0.0,0.4138239079030597,0.049303652871017165,0.06634999268199282,0.13410199779978135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064998257974406,0.0,0.08488988356347574,0.08518553293220966,0.11876012860036228,0.0,0.0,0.16148800251892936
mentalhealth,just-a-weird-human,2020/01/22,"When is help needed? So I’ve been experiencing a lot of stress, and just really hating myself. I’ve been starting to think it may be time to get some help, but I know how much I tend to exaggerate things. How do I know that it’s time to get help?",2.1687735849056606,3.1558454528301887,4.271839622641512,88.03530660377363,75.60377358490567,7.564150943396226,18.910377358490567,8.07648339933343,0.3317207547169807,191,3,46,3,4,66,37,53,0.114,0.745,0.142,0.364,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,1,1,1,0,6,0,0,2,0,12,15,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,4,0,5,11,3,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,4,30,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28369034451237546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680455588109529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5459330517550367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29841360912546394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23081573127050345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995804017230652,0.20131044343819046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17392694367540967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921658839241956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109971320725672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18036951981201807,0.17396332822263244,0.0,0.0,0.3166223719980177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NinjaPotato206,2020/01/22,"People always have a tendency of bullying and making fun of me I was almost constantly being made fun of and bullied (a lot of times phisically) in school and high school. I was called a ""pervert"" and a ""potential school shooter"" by a lot of my classmates.

If i ever defended phisically from phisical agression, people would be quick to label me as ""that crazy kid"".

I was constantly falsly acused of all kinds of things, and it was hilarious to everyone because everyone could call me whatever the fuck they wanted and they would all take it for the truth.

I feel like as a 24 year old adult things have not changed much at all. People still treat me like shit and make disgusting false assumptions about me. I actually have coworkers who have a similar attitude to me than people had in high school.

I fear people don't grow out of being bullies.

I'm constantly an easy target of bullying and being made fun of, and it's not like i do anything to deserve it.

I'm just an introverted guy with aspergers.

But people are assholes and take advantage of me.

I cannot trust anybody, people are fucking disgusting with me.",6.5859230769230725,7.258971709523813,7.1176190476190495,72.80456043956045,65.23809523809524,11.032967032967038,34.24908424908425,10.891193690592663,3.970732600732602,889,38,155,24,13,292,116,210,0.161,0.7120000000000001,0.127,-0.8979,0,0,0,1,0,0,24.0,0,0,2,1,5,17,5,1,11,0,21,3,1,4,5,35,33,14,0,5,5,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,3,8,13,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,7,1,20,11,28,19,6,16,0,0,0,2,8,6,3,4,12,112,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0988756626172147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145935372847854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843080262712171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337937828015865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06176495481821724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20692219454240787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718524821921792,0.0,0.0,0.3284792816656259,0.0,0.08089737766493395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165155581112253,0.0,0.1936350388304525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140154266781654,0.05123145094893417,0.07238446179731002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873411249374906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032471640871084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141045259841257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055112780776344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850244343382848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722806934926329,0.0,0.19174666511557664,0.13526645243702218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448333314875308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632040178523597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4917074524748401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4101731202225241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10400558379195704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091588539528906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15236307864604207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462767804907724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05908167688879674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05976234468604365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14395249291043655,0.0,0.0,0.06524805031143485
mentalhealth,kk24dancer,2020/01/22,"Vegetarianism survey for AP research!! pls take my survey about vegetarianism, it would be greatly appreciated ;)
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeA8d09JXSpTncEzyl3-WqLlImhys3vmxme9jfgpwnxw9CBxA/viewform?usp=sf_link",39.0629411764706,50.930677941176484,23.81911764705882,-60.56897058823525,4.882352941176478,12.811764705882355,43.79411764705883,11.20814326018867,7.945611764705883,203,6,9,4,2,52,15,17,0.0,0.662,0.33799999999999997,0.7687,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7292783833045215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4973467833487349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4698927715313462,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KarCat63,2020/01/22,"Cheating on smaller test Here is the quick story, Me and a lot of other students were caught cheating if we send her an email admitting we cheated we get half credit and she loses her trust in those who cheated (high school) I don’t know if I should tell her. I can’t get it off my mind the best solution would be the one with least consequences. These things usually have a tendency to stay with me for a while and effect me worse than others in the sense they make me feel awful for quite some time.I don’t know what to do anymore.",4.590760157273916,5.063289229357796,4.8810222804718215,87.80247706422018,69.55045871559633,8.06343381389253,26.580602883355173,7.957251820313856,1.3440474442988202,422,12,90,5,7,133,79,109,0.18100000000000002,0.718,0.10099999999999999,-0.8689,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,3,0,1,4,2,8,4,0,8,1,10,0,0,2,0,21,18,6,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,5,0,1,2,3,5,0,2,2,1,16,3,12,13,4,11,0,1,0,0,13,5,0,4,3,68,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387909146058549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25268571706431475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174654794579925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515971779016916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543992650542066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646548370635504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693733224440685,0.0,0.2047041350765485,0.0,0.0,0.16072376764711466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431210490813781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631600263117863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256101156725458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436841067463877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566414359260873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21045396690421314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15996477512193708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404018444691299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651872119370628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24537729567355196,0.17104453178094498,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,votemox11,2020/01/22,"Does anyone else just feel numb? I feel like I have no emotion at all. I am going through a bad period right now in my last year of college. Last seater was terrible, I got really stressed the whole time and procrastinating because the thought of doing anything made me really nervous and scared.

I don't know how to explain my emotions, in a way that can perfectly describe how I am feeling.

I do t know what I am feeling right now. Its like a numbness. I used to be able to cry and get the sadness out there, but the way I am feeling right now, I cant cry, I cant do anything. 

I cant even write this post properly to explain what I feel(or lack of feeling). 

All I know is I am not optimistic and I hate my current situation. 

Does anyone else feel like this",3.0174946236559137,4.365805238709683,4.444919354838714,86.20071236559141,74.03225806451613,7.489247311827956,30.336021505376344,8.07648339933343,2.030408602150538,592,27,125,9,12,197,87,155,0.183,0.7040000000000001,0.114,-0.8281,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,8,13,1,3,7,0,17,2,0,4,3,30,36,7,0,1,3,0,7,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,13,0,0,1,6,9,0,0,4,7,21,4,12,31,4,20,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,0,12,82,27,2,0.11566842800691712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16175610857469008,0.23703194711102016,0.19037052132180732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657830591231023,0.07051040011748287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541126735893015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20244444164926867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19325225870255344,0.2602228259259988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763979058036431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.467883461181531,0.1652670961595726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060431979595304525,0.0,0.06573703321630044,0.0,0.09251060838912203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419862574821522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19070502912563375,0.18857041377014366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952925385860976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944826332573153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107783803239302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14820031368120848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963406165490618,0.0,0.0,0.115804274955338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001615939692976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249779347909915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182781154870627,0.06744719055169124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09990038379112333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183624428459472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913966911201902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448667529807668
mentalhealth,mbetowler,2020/01/22,"Getting over a low period? Anyone have any tips on how to get over a low/depressed and anxious period? I’ve been struggling for weeks.

My mind is so foggy and I’m so tired all the time. Taking medication, and having therapy.

Does anyone have any other suggestions?",1.9234285714285733,4.752351000000001,3.9517142857142855,79.45300000000002,89.0,6.857142857142858,21.142857142857142,7.957251820313856,1.7810857142857146,210,7,35,5,7,71,39,50,0.214,0.7859999999999999,0.0,-0.8802,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,5,2,0,1,1,6,9,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,5,8,1,8,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,22,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35133190486873606,0.0,0.0,0.2918272319753317,0.0,0.3612456604652304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224899969393988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22605692197811636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26992229937389783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602294741664861,0.0,0.0,0.2608288103290313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700513738170724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19422393251571304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954105823349256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15062803570178326,0.2968999848286449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072081258331528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hayolee,2020/01/22,"Why do I feel different than everyone else? I feel like my opinions on things are not ""normal"". I've been coming to terms with the fact that I'm not exactly like everybody else the last couple of years (more than a few, but the last few have been relatively eye-opening), but since I've been socializing a bit more than usual this year it's really hitting me dead in the face.   
I have a lot of trouble getting people to understand me, and if they say they do sometimes I feel that they just don't--I'm not sure if this is my ego or not, haven't figured that out. I have difficulty socializing. Whether it's because I'm just a little odd, or because I have difficulty opening up. The friends I do have like me, but whenever they see that I'm depressed or down they try to comfort me--and for some reason, I cannot stand comfort. I hate validation, and I don't want people to just tell me, ""it will be alright, you're can do it"".  I get unreasonably angry with people for things, and *I* believe that I'm hard to get along with. I've had it been described to me before as ""having to walk on eggshells"" to keep me happy, but the problem is that I don't ever stay happy.  
Lately, my opinions have felt invalidated. I know that is ironic considering my feelings on validation, but I have trouble making up my mind when it comes to how I feel about things emotionally. I think the things I believe may be crazy, or maybe I can tell that other people think that about me and I'm starting to feel that way, too. I definitely have some unhealthy beliefs about things, and I acknowledge that it might be unhealthy or wrong but I can't seem to change the way I feel. And the more and more people argue with me and berate me for it, the more I don't want to change.   
I also feel like I'm being made out to be someone I'm not. I can't help the way people perceive me, and it upsets me a bit. Especially when I can't seem to communicate what I am actually trying to say.     
 tl;dr I have trouble socializing and keeping stable relationships, my opinions on things are outlandish but stubborn, and I feel like I'm some kind of ghost sitting in human skin pretending that I'm human. Maybe I'm not different, maybe I'm normal and it's everybody else.",4.470134228187916,5.246177434004473,5.716749440715888,80.61485570469799,69.96196868008947,8.465592841163312,28.993959731543626,8.648137234880735,2.073998120805369,1751,63,353,28,30,587,177,447,0.157,0.731,0.11199999999999999,-0.9733,2,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,0,0,5,0,12,23,3,1,16,1,43,2,2,4,4,92,85,32,2,7,24,0,12,5,1,3,0,2,0,2,32,22,0,3,21,1,0,3,14,10,0,0,7,15,52,13,44,69,14,33,1,1,1,0,18,13,0,18,16,240,84,0,0.0,0.0,0.07226521436854659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922029554524315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09028425362228533,0.0,0.06301379579141234,0.1668651338355218,0.0,0.0,0.16169377022010056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156676875475302,0.1275805025276543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819384272056104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378188923412616,0.0,0.0,0.15473960835394673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18558577077328275,0.08329985213197436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06698533443505286,0.0,0.07076098010345082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369915830159651,0.1587108043660411,0.0711026589903823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05721329761980151,0.0,0.1160691790910664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15766195894880794,0.06633709731647516,0.07311217687879698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04963628076380658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164372507093666,0.0,0.07711498387725665,0.040697687121181984,0.12072643917859185,0.08353520446415333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808931983351072,0.07422073362686975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295735936053996,0.0,0.0700709026480828,0.049431067886124766,0.0,0.2231890965459174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855871383053764,0.07477259435625992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14511277276213966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3080348751941634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085888528422846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04744035874496085,0.07613899519202998,0.0,0.07950539397671544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177801105979377,0.0,0.0,0.05901079103671277,0.13483045457568554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061257549796694725,0.0,0.0,0.22646365184590744,0.06274501301426856,0.0,0.07324048144846661,0.0,0.052415216867835145,0.07893082913230665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979423899455517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945147413153207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951858250038892,0.0949005660071962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055448672650716,0.0,0.0,0.07709196452551284,0.0,0.0,0.08155910770194312,0.0,0.08735695995532078,0.17633988506652504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682147023106033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096551941105311,0.0,0.09537563072805384
mentalhealth,ssc_3700,2020/01/22,"Can someone please talk to me. Is this normal my feelings or help me realize it’s not My mental health is diagnosed as major depressive disorder with episodes of psychosis, generalized anxiety, as well bipolar characteristics of a mood disorder. 
I have a wonderful boyfriend who is very helpful and accepting of my struggles. Recently we were just having a casual conversation and I half heartedly asked if he would ever have sex with me in my university’s library. I expected a holy answer but he said it depends and I said on what. He responded with “if you wanted to. I’ve done it like that” and I said “where?” He asked “when? There was a time in the teacher’s bathroom, the girl’s room, the boy’s room, the biology lab and the library. I know this isn’t his fault I was faking a laugh and I asked him but it hurt me so much. They were all instances with the same ex but he’s had multiple partners in the past and Iost my virginity to him. And it seems every wild thing we do for sex never amounts to his history. We had sex in a church prayer room but he had sex at his brother’s wedding. He got caught fucking in a parking lot with his at the time girlfriend. He had opportunities For casual sex and I didn’t. I try to do everything to please him. I ask how to blow him better? How to turn him on? How to be better? What should I wear. He’s a good guy but my mind just forces me beneath what he deserves. I truly wish I had sex before him",1.6179813767874975,3.9605202405498297,3.561002106196653,86.25142667110077,81.98969072164948,7.053807781842368,24.851014299966746,8.155646560271837,1.6778215497173259,1134,45,233,24,31,382,153,291,0.068,0.769,0.16399999999999998,0.9817,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,3,1,1,3,11,17,1,1,17,0,24,13,2,4,3,52,41,24,0,8,11,2,1,1,2,2,3,3,3,4,13,17,0,0,7,2,0,1,4,6,1,1,16,4,40,10,31,22,6,22,1,2,0,8,46,14,1,7,8,160,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917256763386004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4483735013517283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202885478969526,0.0,0.0,0.21208940384466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327251410821936,0.12169929905750425,0.0,0.0,0.2748390796281736,0.0,0.0,0.12270267872026187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845937582837366,0.10102367964081416,0.0,0.10776133116747033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060626697970674485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084864461864252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056917736931237,0.0958976015049115,0.0,0.0,0.11872309232012924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274515732186014,0.0,0.1420859568751896,0.1607372740761363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835893460115985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589570359018776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058578683075909764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193747568234253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083429853334572,0.0,0.12106812605095155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814270255901323,0.0,0.0924767966287974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747975053977106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446124226929225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632355769146961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183900177307851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.342166413137604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915543730033482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159365486887234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534893566502198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963737097000576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965840732980857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398331264874152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140645231586985,0.13042033090394786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893275824857167,0.07072205752891116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780744303428763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13788284757016644,0.0,0.13002998580594202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517584558073367,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MasterDime,2020/01/22,"So lost right now. Not having suicidal thoughts but I am slightly depressed. So, at my school, most of my teachers are ok but not the nicest. There are 2 teachers that are my absolute favorites. My social studies teached and my music teacher. Recently, my social studies teacher died. Everybody loved her as a teacher and she supported everybody. Her class was fun and not boring and it’s hit me very, very hard. She was the best teacher I saw everyday and I am kinda lost. My family is supporting me as well, but my mood is still down in the dumps. She was the best teacher I’ve had, and I would do anything for her to come back. I please would like some support. Thank you so much and see you soon.",2.081862745098036,4.6282338529411815,3.0430588235294134,89.39409803921568,81.79411764705881,6.273725490196076,26.71372549019608,7.554174236665415,1.6375643137254907,548,24,107,9,15,174,84,136,0.128,0.5720000000000001,0.3,0.9867,0,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,0,2,0,4,9,17,1,0,5,1,15,1,0,0,0,20,27,15,2,2,6,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,5,1,0,8,3,23,11,8,16,5,11,0,3,2,1,11,4,0,3,7,80,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204674540481347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404147106120913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112850333375745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12775619677072142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773944968020653,0.0,0.1539226829849933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981375770314292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328569035245031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07245692432031528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237964384700695,0.0,0.13385584205081333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090251400911558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16280017980437028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643853539493476,0.0,0.0,0.1266561914101202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009794810262134,0.1181841124923936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3023673606696089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184408023631658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16222740359067409,0.5049023348299526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365442041209795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774181695096644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24474307037348755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13334877690882202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107107730354599,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Buffal0999,2020/01/22,"Depression Solutions If anyone is struggling with depression I really recommend reading these articles. They explain inflammation and gut damage amongst other factors people don't often realize contribute to their depression. 

*What is Depression*: [https://findmyhealthtoday.com/what-is-depression/](https://findmyhealthtoday.com/what-is-depression/)

*What Causes Depression:* [https://findmyhealthtoday.com/what-causes-depression/](https://findmyhealthtoday.com/what-causes-depression/)

*What is the Best Diet for Depression:* [https://findmyhealthtoday.com/what-is-the-best-diet-for-depression/](https://findmyhealthtoday.com/what-is-the-best-diet-for-depression/)

Discuss below what you think",36.328650217706816,46.501685377358505,19.17358490566038,-35.1408127721335,44.283018867924525,13.706240928882435,43.69956458635704,9.466822959209583,9.306472859216257,627,21,24,16,13,149,43,53,0.249,0.625,0.126,-0.8558,0,0,0,0,0,0,79.0,0,1,2,1,1,9,0,1,1,0,4,2,1,1,0,8,6,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,8,0,0,0,0,4,1,4,6,1,1,0,7,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,23,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080771777691668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636821172250836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866719987081945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8954472307536454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800845515983456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554769602985646,0.0,0.07400278663953369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076285983998165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401826761003892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThePoshTwat,2020/01/22,"I feel terrible I think made someone cry today and now I feel awful. I made a comment that was ever so slightly mean to my seatmate and she just stopped talking to me. Then like five minutes later she just lies down on the table and cries. I know it wasn't my fault. She texted me later and explicitely told me that it had nothing to do with me but I still feel like I did everything wrong. I don't know... I've had such a terrible week and I just can't deal with myself anymore. I keep unintentionally acting like a twat and I fucking hate it.

At least I talked to a mate today and we're gonna get lit and watch some Ghibli on Saturday. So I guess I have that going for me...",0.4875704225352138,2.6871185140845064,2.6627992957746507,91.77898767605636,85.69014084507042,5.521830985915493,20.142605633802816,6.9077264865688965,0.3529140845070429,527,16,116,7,16,178,85,142,0.215,0.7170000000000001,0.068,-0.9695,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,9,9,2,0,5,1,9,1,0,2,2,29,26,12,0,0,4,0,3,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,2,7,0,0,2,3,6,0,1,8,5,25,3,11,17,2,17,0,0,2,1,9,4,1,2,14,78,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16487897597944348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3652437196587625,0.0,0.17140024298634973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15038597095642975,0.0,0.0,0.14941808668363982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521885665642081,0.11877166157419478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15369884735974831,0.08686068546665646,0.0,0.09448579715492024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18314717114357007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641410885141823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14777390888679592,0.0,0.0,0.18273734825744808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436694494441781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31462650203657466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810989954853313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952488899116266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408662027950828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277040289471007,0.13899552008169672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26725681938001217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652864454341432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151780965248808,0.15886251503310367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335867311353627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177229916540127,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,godlyhaxx,2020/01/22,"I Kind of like deppresion? 

I'm on mobile so, sorry about the wall, and i have ADHD and Dysgraphia (I think thats how you spell it) so I'm sorry if things are jumpy and dont make sense

I posted this on r/Deppresion but I guess its more for people within Deppresion than out, so im posting it here

I kind of like Deppresion. Yes it sucked to be low but it made me the best i could be, if that makes any sense. I'm out/leaving my Deppresion (pretty sure) and almost out of highschool, Middle school being the start of my 4-5 year Deppresion. Being out of it, sometimes sucks more than being in somehow. I feel like a dick to most of the ""friends"" and people I come across, like im much more aggressive and boundary breaking and i always just feel guilty and stomach hurt after interactions. I just want to be a good person but the being out of Deppresion where i still have no idea what I'm feeling (granted i never have, its weird, i can never identify how im feeling torward someone or myself its all a pain causing mystery) and i dont feel like its possible for me to change; but in Deppresion.. I felt/feel as if i am truly a good person, I was afraid to be aggresive. (At this point i should point out i was in a weird phase of not wantong to be popular, i wanted to be different to truly live on my own terms and thats probaly why i was bullied) The main reason is because of my Bf, who I met in my deppresion, he rarely made me happy but he could make me smile and i did truly love him. He liked me because i was kind, i wouldnt be aggresive i kept to myself and him, he found it adorable I guess, i would too. idk, the point is. I miss Deppresion, it made me a better human and i had the best times of my life feeling like shit so I guess I'm normal.",1.9433057923881518,3.4890915858310656,3.7208297442207967,89.47211567196979,77.28337874659402,6.697336732003166,23.28285136679265,7.4822170145007005,0.9003995605168318,1360,42,296,18,31,457,168,367,0.12,0.6659999999999999,0.214,0.9908,1,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,0,3,14,32,4,1,14,1,32,6,3,10,4,69,64,29,0,11,12,0,6,7,2,3,2,0,0,3,19,19,0,1,10,0,0,1,7,11,0,0,12,6,49,21,41,36,11,34,0,3,0,2,16,22,4,10,15,204,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991613747891392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262217050039569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865519900485173,0.0,0.0,0.05610984945200252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059505487481893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17317898828525213,0.0729736760996558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476083085858797,0.08728498189723545,0.07107533782368493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175555894736538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620572674165085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934029695240733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920378914130779,0.17683617501255725,0.07922285000889166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904683110400196,0.06374727134270344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384114895307499,0.0,0.0,0.2726832712462093,0.0,0.0,0.08783377375239207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883290079399012,0.09314411216067336,0.2673759250130349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577654150165765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736651914909475,0.0,0.0,0.0582794816834612,0.2821726344970742,0.0,0.07285812740377663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446878847301212,0.2342197896380049,0.16522884513157987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060654581610317275,0.0,0.12727409633092832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084259853393394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779680172771423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11440453874032006,0.14408966400336984,0.0,0.0,0.23399677650497566,0.093017992462439,0.15804416411000133,0.08394266210463222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483435474251147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350485250575841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469566147689994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991072943569851,0.0,0.081604819830377,0.18472710411565896,0.058401231727012025,0.0,0.06589285101511068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776500352959098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054816192697278485,0.05286928374622382,0.0,0.0,0.04811243322541763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733345326381193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445273339503346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05861296655324873,0.0,0.0,0.0531339431953881
mentalhealth,Penjolina,2020/01/22,"I regret posting about my anxiety. I made a throwaway account and asked on a few subs how people would feel about dating someone who only worked part time due to mental health issues (I have bipolar and anxiety, but the former is mostly under control with meds and therapy). Honestly, I wasn’t expecting many people to say yes, but what I didn’t anticipate was how cruel some of the comments were, saying I was useless, and a mooch, and there’s no way in hell they would date a “crazy”, “broken” person. I guess I should have known better, but I feel horrible now. I hope I don’t regret posting here...",7.443855072463767,6.737336356521741,7.789347826086956,73.35474637681159,63.69565217391304,10.10144927536232,33.07971014492754,9.2995712137729,2.951927536231885,471,16,83,7,6,155,81,115,0.304,0.586,0.11,-0.9792,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,3,7,9,2,0,6,1,12,2,0,4,0,26,18,10,0,7,3,0,2,0,0,3,2,2,0,1,2,6,0,1,3,0,1,0,4,6,0,0,6,4,13,3,9,9,4,12,1,3,0,0,7,3,1,4,6,60,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745805803474445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677756179184525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587222736255347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20128534039524051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18148586718386084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19770101176731444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907629811928208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17824931204957267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18731491046748844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698141920321591,0.0,0.18194941658887964,0.0,0.0,0.1993452393914824,0.0,0.18085858366791896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649127556546187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19434318608852708,0.0,0.2488369707063423,0.1567019800764984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437558637792795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285435659636024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15206017457171794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052339523282516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464752770254128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245102210261054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13065271108252324,0.0,0.0,0.25497367852386266,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,strumpen,2020/01/22,"I want to scream. I want to scream so loud that everybody around me runs away. I want them to stop caring so I can end it once and for all. in peace. all my memories wiped away. I want to be isolated so no one will get hurt by my choices, but at the same time I love them and want to be there in their future. I want to be free from all this pain instead of imprisoned in shame. I hate this life. I want to scream how much I hate everything about it.",0.12350515463917587,2.0012160412371145,1.6960927835051578,100.17919072164952,84.4639175257732,5.9418556701030925,16.916494845360827,7.1686216300943375,-0.2863558762886602,344,7,88,5,10,111,59,97,0.304,0.509,0.187,-0.9620000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,3,0,8,11,2,1,1,0,5,3,0,1,3,17,17,7,0,7,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,5,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,8,0,1,0,4,16,4,19,13,5,12,0,1,0,1,4,7,0,0,4,62,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506060642999226,0.0,0.0,0.31790034980723586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249028074002268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14984326079260835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15204807122989866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838956503890283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33406044036689075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111068432237887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949683411849052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15269155123062506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436676284427915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18017117384509604,0.1146407434114369,0.0,0.18001944336385506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14144205167588084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865021592678712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6985072128311673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jerianne____,2020/01/22,"I'm sleeping 10 hours a day lately. I have generalized depression along with seasonal. It's been grey, foggy and cold here which is causing my sleep schedule to go way out of control. I cant fall asleep until 3 am or wake up before 11 am. Today I slept in until 1:30pm. I kept waking up this morning trying to get up but my body was just too exhausted, I finally managed to force myself up but truthfully I could go back to bed right now, I'm still really tired. Does anyone have any advice on how to help it? Melatonin is out of the question unfortunately, no matter the mg I get really bad nightmares from it.",2.261693989071034,4.519202737704919,4.237295081967215,82.79124316939892,79.0,7.017486338797814,23.281420765027317,8.07648339933343,1.4874076502732243,482,16,92,9,12,164,92,122,0.162,0.764,0.07400000000000001,-0.9236,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,3,0,10,9,7,3,1,18,18,7,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,5,5,0,2,1,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,4,2,10,1,20,13,0,25,0,1,1,0,2,9,0,2,12,60,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850611782968776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12878575293734787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241978235863938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456225013681784,0.15812544406715884,0.0,0.0,0.16114950614521328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21035989014064094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19454672447581944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21240718976644654,0.15120552833805534,0.0,0.0,0.12213524745438195,0.0,0.16311380423918048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657288193881972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074579166322099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19788778689163128,0.0,0.21525947200654166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693826854123086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18650239601356014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136303134268942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121503563945467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24264497280590955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16173056376139788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3790360635814412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512401211917109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21766590260301036,0.17951129346650094,0.0,0.0,0.12857744620163314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15032203152380652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,doodledote,2020/01/22,"i dont know what to do i've been traumatized since i was young with my parents sweeping it under the rug and getting my abuser therapy instead of me, it was my fault, i was about 4. i remember everything, my parents detached from me because they didnt know how to approach me or didnt want to, i was silent. i started paintings and drawing and stuff like that instead, ive been struggling with ptsd anxiety bipolar depression and whater else is fucked in my brain. a suicide attempt has been made two years ago, recently clean a year give or take. years later im almost 19, out that situation started college moved away, but i realized something, not realized just accepting the fact, ive had this cold numbing feeling in me since i can remember, im always limp, nothing brings me joy, i stopped painting because i cant anymore, everything i do is shit, my parents have abandoned me, my family has too, i have no one, i am nothing i am dust under the couch, i dont think im able to be happy, i want to kill myself for good i dont want to live ive never seen or experienced  anything worth waking up for, i dont know what to do",7.313203844613532,5.766806607929523,7.948930716860236,74.82829795754908,64.41850220264317,10.897717260712852,40.019623548257904,9.800150414767053,3.875928634361234,888,44,173,15,11,298,130,227,0.221,0.708,0.07,-0.9843,3,0,1,0,1,2,25.0,0,0,1,1,6,13,3,1,5,0,31,6,3,2,2,33,48,9,2,3,6,3,2,1,0,0,2,0,4,0,8,7,0,2,10,0,1,3,10,8,0,2,12,5,36,5,21,35,0,21,0,2,1,1,5,7,2,4,12,116,44,1,0.09746583086634623,0.11548107184601347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639757831129356,0.0,0.09759795070254658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109937910572021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456109383704436,0.0,0.09665991436939936,0.0,0.0,0.08020607417600527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915723564778897,0.0,0.0,0.11882853170197855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880410113241253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394717730710302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.456916911550907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142019514657915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17519200829923626,0.0,0.09188211110398062,0.0,0.04928165260657027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901055900924622,0.05092187387384746,0.09349810614973827,0.0,0.08174971469566679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037541893269862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158394676686083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783150108938,0.0,0.1606940150773824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04761688177201654,0.0,0.08606411431178264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922245257909371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103590753522526,0.0,0.0,0.07517165734200615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18704218676850815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660453694305651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3246728126209343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393234053891815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09623574961506906,0.0,0.2208195730867065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004727476267967,0.16124948495349406,0.1095556775520046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503395835058085,0.0,0.0,0.13797363348215652,0.0,0.0,0.0814857988352742,0.0,0.10189244852218386,0.11157505784623427,0.10661179962330382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328217503917879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114606718270539,0.0,0.0,0.06245216892139367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520995441728876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17246361689271972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18829439860541652
mentalhealth,featherless_chicken_,2020/01/22,"Something that people often don't mention about getting out of that ""dark place""… You feel lost. Depression and anxiety have become such an inseparable part of your everyday life that leaving them behind feels... Odd. You get so comfortable in that place that moving on from it, even tho it's for the better, makes you feel uncomfortable, unsafe. You find yourself looking back at when you were in your lowest and for a moment you might even ""miss"" that. It had become a part of you. A part of who you were and now you feel like you've lost a part of yourself. 

I often find myself thinking that maybe I should go back to that...

Everyone talks about how important it is to have people that help you out of your dark place. But it is also important that those people stay with you after that. That they don't let you return to it, that they make you see what life is without it. That you still have your personality and identity even without that darkness characterising you.

Yes, in the beginning you might feel out of place. Out of your comfort zone. But, after you go through that, with the support of people that love you, it's so worth it. Trust me.",3.551712328767124,5.8488729726027415,3.9827831050228326,86.01116095890413,74.98173515981735,6.754429223744293,23.278767123287672,7.734863291789972,1.1054290410958902,907,27,174,13,20,284,108,219,0.073,0.779,0.14800000000000002,0.9541,1,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,23,3,3,18,11,0,0,8,1,15,3,0,3,0,30,35,12,0,1,4,0,5,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,29,10,0,0,8,0,1,3,4,4,0,0,5,7,30,7,34,26,4,27,0,4,2,1,32,12,0,4,12,142,59,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966698811752232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620989794378738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320501185043753,0.0,0.0,0.2200474403123803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810680099154704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580354023809676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19739646642549824,0.0,0.0,0.09519226659007557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518572034267773,0.0711693609380477,0.0,0.0,0.18210383080251447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040958658550217,0.0,0.11323397706340906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667739489207229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548440105280353,0.0,0.10186936320887567,0.14073071192310255,0.048669855999937416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365666574886778,0.0,0.2174964805842908,0.0,0.08991196657152152,0.0,0.13299576645684816,0.0,0.10008282317616353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113645689756438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058815039801552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4315199380563905,0.0,0.2762590146495485,0.08698533519091596,0.4163315439932533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938514904465066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669321912998958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106182878161856,0.07955756954364808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11304888691094185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007169719406891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383320274605361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19206244420986812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imnotafuckboidrip,2020/01/22,I need help understanding depression So like I’ve heard of depression like everyone else can you guys like to help me understand it I have a problem with understanding people also is there a difference between suicidal depression and “normal” depression and how have you pulled your self out of suicidal thoughts and can anyone do it if they work hard enough,6.9247619047619065,9.383634809523807,6.743047619047619,69.16028571428575,65.98412698412699,12.024126984126985,34.822222222222216,11.602472056035307,5.104894603174603,295,14,46,11,5,93,45,63,0.322,0.519,0.159,-0.9444,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,3,1,1,4,8,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,1,0,14,12,7,2,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,2,7,3,6,10,1,2,0,4,0,0,9,1,0,1,3,32,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311772051711214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764888296563913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.530404702677058,0.0,0.0,0.16085015853807982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860960839887373,0.0,0.0,0.15907662149328572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471105554553987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243960851231764,0.0,0.0,0.1379133983059342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20638551990739326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256438408253489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415564710237068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084316648456333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673297986922098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731409822014135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606085926006769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33680346198060845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222303597063874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4808176076383802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208103958383923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kirmell,2020/01/22,"i think i have ocd hello,so lets get to the point. sometimes i have a urge to roll my eyes or with my tongue touch the top of my front teeth where they meet the gums, or sometimes i have an urge to wash my hands after i have touched even spilled coffee for a second, well its not for everything like for example when i touch slime or paint, or i have spilled ink on my skin its exactly the opposite.",4.5750602409638566,4.519402168674702,4.674361445783133,91.11612048192774,69.48192771084338,8.567710843373495,27.443373493975905,8.238735603445708,1.3634115662650608,312,9,73,4,5,97,53,83,0.027999999999999997,0.9209999999999999,0.051,0.1999,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,7,0,6,5,4,0,1,8,8,5,0,0,5,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,6,13,2,10,7,0,7,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,4,3,48,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22231590642147664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025072743274446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17585547901148946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441882252776905,0.0,0.16444189728359548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181883290314349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6657963836229214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21567462556829775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026367194168281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,muneera28,2020/01/22,"memory loss hi guys, so recently i’ve been experiencing severe memory loss and confusion between reality and dreams.  a few days back i went shopping with my mom and we got on an escalator and i actually don’t remember getting on the escalator, even my mom was concerned. so i don’t know why this is happening, i’ve been diagnosed with social anxiety disorder, generalized anxiety disorder and depression but i’m not sure if these disorders contribute to memory loss or confusion. please help me, i’d really appreciate it",5.740212765957447,8.26556232978724,8.575478723404256,54.50875000000002,69.31914893617022,14.912765957446807,37.28191489361703,13.023866798666859,7.115131914893618,425,24,64,24,8,156,67,94,0.22699999999999998,0.654,0.11900000000000001,-0.649,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,3,4,7,0,2,3,0,6,1,0,0,1,18,12,10,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,2,2,1,1,3,6,0,0,5,1,7,1,6,7,1,6,0,4,0,0,7,2,0,4,3,39,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.16265604896712632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550201348340636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816695676515436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749508374677504,0.0,0.14356160414293814,0.16917712081123765,0.0,0.0,0.5730906160264915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110090847431063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870836415684385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333095608680414,0.0,0.0,0.165039824288846,0.14739494764199948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117223741050411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160320144449743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3904281939648043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829650513289762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677974710882444,0.0,0.16457680929634386,0.0,0.1888164269211469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883014343623873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990970074971914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709432615289987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15451442207694144,0.1504031563309029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vagabond202,2020/01/22,"Thought Inquiry Sometimes I have this explosion of, like, thirty different thoughts. Some descript, some nondescript, but they all happen at the same time and it is difficult to sort through them all. I can still talk to people, as it seems to collapse into a single thread for easier management when I want to speak, but it can get a bit annoying when I am driving home or just playing videogames. What is this called? Should I mention this to my therapist?",6.199317269076308,7.917532566265067,5.585722891566267,79.65440763052213,66.71084337349397,9.388755020080325,35.52008032128514,9.725611199111238,3.633716465863453,365,18,63,8,6,111,64,83,0.128,0.77,0.102,-0.6553,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,0,4,4,1,0,3,0,7,0,0,0,2,17,13,7,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,7,2,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,8,2,11,10,7,7,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,5,5,50,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943741260440016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753298585160007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817136177329456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087437468604005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23843939811164025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704682242465204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317311782506306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869325722999368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24546769597743506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666782113879373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21533271795081374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167242700680268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31306971938396944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4281238383167792,0.1572276939615255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15903908175128706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NathanSaysNope,2020/01/22,"Anxiety from persistent intrusive thoughts. Need help! Hello everyone...

I've been dealing with this issue of general anxiety from being ""attacked"" by these thoughts that constantly appear in my mind throughout the day. By ""attacked"" I mean thoughts that give me enough anxiety to the point where I curse outloud to stop thinking, degrade self worth, become angry/distant from people I interact with, etc. I've tried mediation and mindfulness exercises but it seem that my emotional strength is not strong enough after the fact....

Thoughts that pop up:
-failures/being behind everyone
-Not being able to connect with people/loneliness
-predicting an unhappy future
-feeling unhappy all the time and not finding a solution even though numerous attempts have been made

I'm a 24 year old male who is getting his associates in computer science. Days seem to be stressful. Trying new things to see if I enjoy them but everything seems like more work than enjoyment. Emptiness feeling when I'm left to my own devices. 

Any help would be appreciated. Thank you everyone.",6.569007558330598,9.7701876424581,6.249431482090043,69.01133420966154,69.22346368715084,10.021820571804142,38.46237265856063,10.194018383442646,5.1451265856063095,864,50,119,26,17,269,129,179,0.15,0.6729999999999999,0.177,0.8335,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,1,5,4,10,2,1,7,0,10,1,0,1,2,33,30,7,0,3,6,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,9,5,0,1,12,1,1,1,3,4,0,0,7,3,11,6,21,18,6,18,0,0,1,0,12,6,0,5,12,76,20,2,0.11300197615943593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684521879129283,0.0,0.25933860738587483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571121227526196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480180455372468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211499154085345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575385240518898,0.11650007552025618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711201352918994,0.0,0.2335224974099712,0.12602707414114958,0.07463673950628809,0.0,0.0,0.32393469244092626,0.1015588897626156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142743889513825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328175900631598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059038868558737065,0.1084017923837682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514856852804862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794470427534587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122776977736547,0.0,0.0,0.05520705760120921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692520211553637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230922797020998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22819956535738614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378953347938092,0.0,0.10913801273466654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857656500089896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834134199323775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682339293724097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004794458389692,0.3086182651144129,0.11788570594955002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447471196283286,0.12944338189680984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403703735330434,0.0,0.0,0.07507349177137554,0.07240710350315356,0.111023867834275,0.35884378650947146,0.06589236103638722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344184833545849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226678449110986,0.0,0.0,0.0802733616785774,0.0,0.0,0.07276956773135666
mentalhealth,anonmute,2020/01/22,"I focus on something for like a month or 2 and then I just loose interest It could be an actor, a movie, anything like that. It’s never something important or educational. I don’t leave the house much and barely have any energy. I don’t know if it has to do with my mental health but my dad comments a lot on how I super focus on something and then just drop it. I hate loosing interest in things.",1.0465311653116558,3.3239276097561015,3.360894308943092,87.19453929539299,83.87804878048779,6.083468834688348,21.30623306233063,7.3871296695380915,0.8577680216802164,312,10,64,5,9,107,56,82,0.13699999999999998,0.674,0.18899999999999997,0.6728,0,0,3,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,1,0,5,0,7,1,0,1,1,15,9,10,0,2,6,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,8,5,7,7,2,9,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,4,6,48,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16553173471592084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003112418943603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19434846505585116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403236424150492,0.0,0.2587406188180285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28087024366910657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337754779623713,0.0,0.0,0.2577431879087894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378422537415013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069442131840832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453068282125937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19429292470161655,0.0,0.17893931654571354,0.0,0.18773800104455526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5621823110979927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16171527024795573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,doctordanish123,2020/01/22,"People need to stop telling others that they'll find the solution to their problems in their own mind. Seriously. This is such a crazy notion that ""everything you need is inside you"". Like no. That doesn't happen. People need to get help. People need external support. You can't do everything alone. You can't be the one guy. We need each other. We are social animals. Trying to find solution in oneself will led you no where. 

Think of this, after having a fracture, everything you need still is in there. The broken parts of the bone, still there. But is that helpful? No. You need help. 

Being alone, you can't do a thing properly. We need people. We need to work with each other. 

The movies we watch, the best directors don't work alone. They work with people. The best book you read had to be edited and spoofread. Printing had to be done by other people. 

Your mental illness is in your mind. Yes. But you can't solve it without knowing how to. The how to isn't there in your mind, and you don't have it. If you already knew how to get better, would you still let yourself suffer? 

Read books, watch videos, talk to professionals, talk to people who are understanding of things, try to be clear about your understanding of this. Go out. Do something about your problems. The answers isn't in your mind yet. Find it. 


Find what the solution to your problem is.",1.5164114114114078,4.241741884169887,2.296142213642213,91.41449217074221,89.6177606177606,5.0399399399399405,19.163556413556414,6.691623216298621,0.33802694122694144,1064,31,205,14,36,331,118,259,0.109,0.745,0.146,0.8907,0,3,1,0,0,0,48.0,5,20,4,6,14,10,0,0,13,1,34,2,1,4,1,49,53,8,0,14,4,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,18,12,0,1,10,5,0,2,13,5,0,1,4,2,30,5,32,40,6,16,0,1,2,0,38,8,0,1,7,153,48,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361589195804784,0.0838748797430142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595279169278826,0.06722142595944172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778086866292001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20492877663055512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778736497400776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942034508696616,0.0,0.043196151259602224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525822049949123,0.06721215026706888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15283633089202356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04177109350712765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07772162624696692,0.0,0.037132855633589125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765965079346409,0.0,0.3069789220528212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5072196032423103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051503859074062484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230745311268167,0.0,0.3688525540290648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21818339068299172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205380507107172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747888595449222,0.0,0.05851338935608893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820962698817504,0.06354469868113291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625108726862363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218202462927555,0.06643288615496505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009904621975314,0.048701789916984366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320662339133356,0.0,0.0,0.15825054869849509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326739382060705,0.0,0.16600054945951662,0.0,0.0,0.05399271904627302,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,puplelily3,2020/01/22,"Is it ever going to get better? (sorry for my bad English)
Lately I just want to disappear from this world. Everything seems so impossible.. Im all alone, I don't have a shoulder to cry on. Everyone left. Noone wants to handle me now. Who wants to help a worthless human like me? Only I can help myself but it seems so impossible. Im trying so hard but keep failing. Where do I go? Where do I have to go? Why isn't it so easy like people tell me? Why isn't just get up and shake it off? Why am I so bad at this.. You dont have to read it. Its mostly to vent... I feel like Im in a dream. Nothing makes sense time passes so quickly yet so slowly I can speak so loud and nobody would hear. I can describe my feeling yet no one understand. So I turn to myself. I am my only friend who hates me most of the time. Im drowning, why cant I do something? Why am I so weak? Why cant I just stop with this? Maybe there is no hope anymore after all I have tried. Maybe I should end it.",-1.2259366576819417,0.7877150990566051,1.5562533692722376,97.39056603773584,93.76415094339623,4.160646900269541,15.590296495956874,5.773587663045528,-0.7515099730458221,739,17,177,6,28,255,113,212,0.166,0.682,0.152,-0.6572,0,1,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,0,2,21,13,1,1,4,0,23,2,1,1,3,27,42,14,1,6,5,0,3,3,1,2,1,3,0,1,12,3,0,2,5,2,0,6,8,7,0,1,0,6,26,6,19,40,4,27,0,2,0,0,10,9,0,5,15,116,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242414169956077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807606618924268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16514436781389188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08746352079287123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086301846905093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590278543231848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759054476455846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945509488908529,0.0,0.09449725440627901,0.08887936180099583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000734336440492,0.07064974338152955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764050968866792,0.0,0.10333584723540376,0.0,0.16861085970472056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885894111772391,0.0976371436434586,0.0,0.0,0.11146048878369752,0.0,0.13257284577634554,0.0,0.0,0.09822384757128803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4272890541141508,0.0,0.0,0.08790134450393151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155650270232287,0.0,0.10744839226369983,0.0,0.0,0.14494353152073838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660123727904863,0.0,0.19870420869593144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489125874653352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701299153866959,0.15042636733682402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856050214085363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892055212792543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18005838456626252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613327110459525,0.0,0.1107035014226386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267963666416937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643753143604822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533152853805025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13428478378897066,0.10756804552277774,0.0,0.1029519231332969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17499035888822784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5354175815254006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025131105990857,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uhhsalt,2020/01/22,"feeling genuinely happy in months title says it all to be honest this is the first time in almost a year that im feeling actually happy, I'm 17 and I've landed a good paying side job and i am making people around me happy too and I've started completing things too",0.7391168831168822,3.20460150909091,3.5651948051948037,83.49636363636365,88.45454545454545,5.324675324675325,18.766233766233768,6.868970318607317,0.5903506493506487,213,6,39,3,7,75,42,55,0.0,0.669,0.331,0.9601,1,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,1,9,8,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,5,4,7,1,10,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,5,23,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.2055478155577337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21091892559572348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875083841429535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22084511392635067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130051531725096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17916466365030795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17666930368156866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6726695175885146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275202184125707,0.0,0.2090211496476749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405994310466104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16812557145787346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14602667932977542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750413501915468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908740565305367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13993547251222055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282203024008526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356410046306129
mentalhealth,lucky_demon,2020/01/22,"Therapist vs Psychiatrist medication debate TL;DR:  Therapist says no meds, Psych says stay on meds.  Not sure which.

3 years on Lamictal (150mg 2x/day) for Bi Polar disorder.  My therapist just encouraged me to start the process of start coming off of it, stating that there's no real science backing up chemical imbalance in the brain in relation to manic depression.

My Psychiatrist just says, ""If it's not broke, don't fix it.""  Of course meaning, that since I haven't had any manic depressive episodes in the last 3 years, why would I stop taking it?

My instinct is to keep taking it as a manic episode seems terrifying to me at this point in my life.  Thoughts?  

Background is 3 psych wards for suicidal ideation and 2 attempts over a period of 10 years and countless manic episodes peppered in between.  4 arrests (no felonies).  Co-occurring Alcoholism and drug addiction.  3 years sober now, I'm a substance abuse counselor for homeless families, and am engaged to another sober individual.  I meditate, pray, work a 12 step program and absolutely love my work and my family now.

(This whole situation reminds me of that Curb Your Enthusiasm episode where Larry is conflicted between the Doctor and the Pharmacist.)",6.209017783857727,8.46948094418605,6.630725034199728,70.04939808481532,67.46511627906978,10.640218878248973,37.76333789329685,10.718039707386858,4.854937072503419,973,54,154,30,17,315,138,215,0.146,0.773,0.081,-0.9423,0,0,2,0,1,0,36.0,0,1,0,3,7,7,0,0,9,0,8,9,1,0,1,24,19,9,1,2,6,0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,11,8,1,4,3,0,0,2,7,3,0,0,2,3,13,4,27,16,1,29,1,3,0,2,6,13,0,2,12,89,24,6,0.0,0.14026835061082868,0.0,0.12905848974885695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651890041965067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050671137293279,0.12413830808827304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103172066521814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321582105324402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197927393834558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634933904571804,0.0,0.2039318116999036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568090192849933,0.12117334594200488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729046781265525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22320804559870705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522714078793756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650059663251426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361971127489959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068482150360645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12895733514830093,0.2630008766300914,0.1192616945806772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11191327448013323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13474947345325886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824364991167565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777439804663784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979303314807822,0.13307110805797365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16758879777398947,0.12618399342829809,0.0,0.09897620811894348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949534542555624,0.0,0.11157764198649872,0.0,0.1780234571363566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4123666914974279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398546065354467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682517912451736,0.1321740231574803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17237320366261974,0.0,0.0,0.08409819714540956,0.0,0.0,0.30494746079089685
mentalhealth,Lilian_23,2020/01/22,Anxiety and Stomach issues I’ve been diagnosed with anxiety for a while now and I’ve been going to therapy and seeing a psychiatrist it’s helped a lot. But I have horrible stomach issues still. Sitting alone in public spaces gives me so much anxiety and causes me to have to go to the bathroom often and have really embarrassing gas. Even talking to new people for the first time triggers my anxiety and it spirals from there. It’s stressed me out to the point I don’t like being in public without someone with me. Which is impossible to avoid if I plan on going to college next year. Can anyone help me?,3.9846153846153816,6.094365111111113,5.614025641025645,75.65180769230773,73.1025641025641,8.44068376068376,29.648717948717948,9.120678840339163,2.908675897435897,486,21,83,11,10,165,76,117,0.165,0.792,0.043,-0.8908,0,2,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,6,4,0,3,6,0,9,3,2,2,0,17,14,10,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,3,0,1,2,1,9,1,18,11,2,18,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,3,9,64,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17156367964690122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5068878868204505,0.0,0.0,0.11582649160766613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17016841553755416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813149542520356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941041390499323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409020000812463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15890679377482725,0.28242852748741504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220637133515617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3457916033853658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092833452506615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408299009039013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177197820230175,0.0,0.0,0.15998602330508133,0.17617089769773042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484101141141945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15659300919776373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611977835089847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200178562714435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14035490139301884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228848677994534,0.0,0.18975177753308609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314337927196132,0.0,0.0,0.18943547330958352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659198059637904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15968090941894356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667331635654316
mentalhealth,awaningcrow,2020/01/22,"Bizarre Sleep Behaviour? I've never brought this up with anyone before.

I have been diagnosed with CPTSD. I've been on two medications that have made a world of difference for me (seroquel and prazosin) - I went front wanting to die every day, to being quite stable. Something that I have noticed since being on these medications, though, is concerning. Every 6-8 months, I rip out keys from my computer keyboard in my sleep? 

I'm not at all aware of this when it's presumably happening. I wake up and there is a key missing. There have been about 4 of them at this point. One of them even looking as if I'd keen chewing it in my sleep.

I'm wondering if anyone else has encountered this before? I'd really like to stay on this medication.",3.369073672806067,5.631016373239441,4.458732394366198,82.55089382448539,75.40845070422534,8.031202600216687,27.120260021668468,8.841846274778883,2.290493391115927,583,23,110,13,13,190,92,142,0.065,0.878,0.057,-0.2856,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,1,6,3,0,0,2,0,12,9,4,1,2,14,22,7,1,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,10,5,1,0,2,0,0,3,2,1,0,2,6,1,11,2,23,14,1,20,0,1,1,0,2,12,0,3,5,72,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20530677949372514,0.15042481587648993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24985002644145685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468069600664307,0.0,0.0,0.14900967549865715,0.15236623138700595,0.15338583699493294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264142360283495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696702114571742,0.0,0.2473885361302709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298241346877029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172424676131901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328393446261054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13891574582613986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4436887230838508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718282564226727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322939050208695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714484882377134,0.0,0.0,0.09948266661308756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13878347674780253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15615115153915846,0.0,0.0,0.09405063397590163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144325099146673,0.0,0.4407498948030523,0.0,0.0,0.11302197758313395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648057300843105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14424067572054758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434126303661643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659269958490859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609490327735976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15920984048464545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lordburka,2020/01/22,"Lost a pregnancy and unable to talk about it Hello,

I'm a 30 year old male and me and my wife have been trying to get pregnant for 3 years. A few months ago we were finally successful but sadly it did not go well and we lost the baby.

Ever since I found that u am unable to talk about it. I really want to because I know my wife needs it (and so do I) but I can not physically get the words out of my mouth and I either remain silent or burst out crying, all without saying a single word about it.

I have this with everyone about this specific subject but I can converse about other things normally.

I am lost and I don't know what to do. Any advice is helpful",1.7785011990407682,3.387656820143885,3.868507194244604,87.95849220623505,77.92086330935251,6.9354916067146295,20.93585131894484,7.793537801064563,0.7771290167865716,514,13,111,8,12,176,87,139,0.127,0.815,0.057999999999999996,-0.8635,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,0,4,8,6,0,0,6,0,13,1,1,0,2,30,25,12,0,3,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,11,12,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,4,1,0,7,1,16,2,16,18,4,10,0,4,0,0,11,2,0,1,7,82,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677899339069278,0.15220775084885654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676653727366935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467089414163584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18861189776966591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15531866451544385,0.0,0.16407324113799815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880964470265385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882676841287328,0.0,0.0,0.17941947084260645,0.0,0.09758495248224404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509147345114648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18873117424406208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5623148883392495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370547591560974,0.0,0.0,0.1273184439845994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682362434974594,0.0,0.0,0.1801774412870822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999979662033413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654816863152178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420376699788797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760229029659626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407439282585655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657767122548138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127714126399454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15438506767185248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655192635453245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22114714686335304
mentalhealth,kingofthehedgehogs,2020/01/22,"Hello Not really sure what to say. I have delusional thoughts, I'm paranoid, lie constantly, hate my body although I've been told it's nice, hate my face and I don't feel emotional for anyone in my life, I cry at films but with people it's just weird, it's like they're almost background. I'm not depressed, I'm just, Idk what actually,  but something. I'm 22 btw",0.6974666666666671,3.0705542133333346,2.6066666666666656,91.21666666666668,86.86666666666667,6.0,21.66666666666667,7.3871296695380915,0.8780666666666677,286,10,61,5,9,95,54,75,0.198,0.685,0.11699999999999999,-0.252,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,2,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,12,12,4,0,0,6,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,2,6,3,5,9,0,3,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,27,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.2332792567148071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393750089561817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671499917869532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26553173010118963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583291669721422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625862582728977,0.0,0.0,0.20589424444963916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26890015839014986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087134974818055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4720266708711427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16884876499187754,0.1167882257628642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16572783866444651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314216837257605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19010292086003586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18403311056119745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225302703906625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18977976264918373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284234397861132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gethatshitoutofmyass,2020/01/22,"I posted this on r/meditation but I think I can get more help from you guys (Suppressed memories, depression, PTSD) I used to meditate every day for 30-60 min last year but I just started again a couple days ago.  So I can say I’m somewhat experienced. But last night was my first time meditating while high and it let me deeper into my conscious than usual. And I felt something that triggered a horrible memory. I was in shock. My head was throbbing, I was extremely nauseous and I felt completely defeated/broken and suicidal. I think I may have gotten PTSD from that event. I remember blaming all of my sleepless nights and mental illness on drugs/weed when it was really that event. I just didn’t want to acknowledge that it happened. It was the worst day of my life. I’ve had depersonalization ever since. Although I feel better right now, I stayed up all night digging through my head, remembering most of the details. But I’m glad they resurfaced because I can now reflect on it. This is a chance to learn because I’m mostly responsible for what happened.  This is going to be hard to overcome but I believe I have the power to be who I used to be.

Any advice is helpful. Thank you.",2.9862585812356954,5.5075828508771965,4.3199466056445495,81.74694508009155,77.94736842105263,7.1231121281464524,27.45690312738368,8.18289091462,2.118688939740656,942,40,172,18,23,310,138,228,0.145,0.748,0.107,-0.9225,1,0,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,1,3,8,6,0,0,6,0,21,5,2,3,3,36,39,14,1,1,7,0,4,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,14,6,0,1,11,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,11,6,30,3,22,23,7,34,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,4,23,121,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170394226778254,0.10617029801276376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144879607724062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460233130350262,0.0,0.0,0.13494158003805828,0.0,0.10592824827897217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557824529010728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325249988275828,0.0,0.2317283232857605,0.0,0.10315910476000477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834027049597544,0.10091273986403776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06056012038843365,0.0,0.22999904002778426,0.0,0.0,0.1018776629430034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257571832714262,0.0,0.06806896119823372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859271582417273,0.21182726308571115,0.0,0.10729182929067947,0.0,0.2458404342342209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605607594473972,0.12654527276839622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19525968164428767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247457717873388,0.08459822411721159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070160360326708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371926030149054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470808618729984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28001318520122115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672875476703764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27135575255588296,0.10228429315211278,0.0,0.09524718469233397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990763063417906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220603024838647,0.0,0.0,0.08477495591325837,0.12766059094557347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310106921851494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026959872264283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348961198976352,0.0,0.0,0.06983978393862972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20688841632361485,0.13191149770859453,0.0,0.07064439366531677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771289844183747
mentalhealth,therealrichhomiejuan,2020/01/22,"honestly idk lmao idk what the problem is man. i search all the time and i cant find it. im just sad all the time. lately ive had more suicidal thoughts, especially right before i go to bed. thanks to that, im up all night unless i drink or take sleeping pills. the thoughts don't go away, but at least i escape them through sleep. i guess the main reason for all this is loneliness. i have very few friends. i tried to make more at work or at school, but no one seems to like a word that comes out of my mouth and i seem to push them away from ever wanting to do anything with me. i like to think im mature for my age, but what the hell who knows . truth be told i think im just writing this shit cuz im lost asf lmao. got no clue what imma do for my future but ik one thing im sick and tired of feeling like this so i guess not all hope is lost just yet.

thanks",-0.19500000000000028,1.6642239736842157,1.4055263157894764,101.90618421052632,85.57894736842105,4.642105263157895,16.868421052631582,5.6839178017228535,-0.866547368421053,665,14,171,4,20,214,112,190,0.21,0.613,0.177,-0.8277,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,3,7,15,2,0,7,0,11,8,4,3,7,43,34,12,1,3,11,0,1,3,1,0,3,0,1,1,11,6,1,0,10,1,0,4,5,6,0,2,7,1,19,9,23,26,10,20,1,3,0,0,7,8,2,7,11,101,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289463366542646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18928384220519334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571631989647459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677251568380957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867994015953584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911187190470729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509336054808501,0.07196363858214241,0.0,0.0,0.09206809005706422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778260261823405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449771212225962,0.0,0.0805653410973093,0.0,0.22193739915450053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005054694389164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6528532218649622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055360194137063626,0.0,0.11363115359958373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14763909135308687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21992382558107615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672400253712197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09453104839105878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365185058735193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638782749472566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357024817358501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602538767892426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194712182311312,0.0,0.18340698621700213,0.0,0.0,0.10340092413047784,0.0,0.0,0.201611393391244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101854961108356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573864095065898,0.0,0.0,0.18548273028015386,0.0,0.0,0.06692249500594381,0.12909121204436194,0.0,0.15994141836193734,0.1174763847621863,0.11577770595996772,0.0,0.0962546491694136,0.0,0.06839105979114603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311523217382652,0.059414902964266963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333478627885699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vetel_431,2020/01/22,"questions of a student Hello

I'm a high school student. I'm 17.

sorry for the long intro here is my questions:

1. in 2 years I'm going to have a big exam (multiply-test) that if I get a good rank in it I will be able to go to a good university. for getting a good rank in this exam you have to be able to answer questions fast. so it's not important whether you get good grades in school or you don't. so for getting fast at doing the tests you have to study a lot like about 6 to 7 hours a day plus going to school. with this much studying, I think I'm going to waste one of the most important parts of my life. what is your idea about this? because like I believe that you can do some stuff that you won't be able to do them in any other age.
2. in my country having a girlfriend is not accepted. but many of my friends have a girlfriend. but I never had any kind of interaction with a girl.  I don't know whether to try to get a girlfriend or not? will it affect my life and my studies in a bad way? if I don't have one do you think I will have a problem communicating with girls in the future?
3. and my last questions: when I'm tired of studying I go and watch some youtube videos but while I'm watching those videos I'm will always remember tasks that I haven't done like homework or something like that. even after the rest, I'm always tired because I was thinking about studying. so I want to know whether there is some other activity that I can do for taking rest instead of watching videos so I won't be tired at the end something like meditation, etc. 

in the end, I want to appreciate you for reading this.

I'm sorry if my questions didn't fit this subreddit.",2.1332625994694965,3.6156473817663866,3.653421750663132,90.42692307692309,76.6068376068376,6.208900677866198,25.208861381275177,6.8039241337230125,0.8176139306415173,1305,46,289,12,29,432,145,351,0.092,0.809,0.099,0.3932,0,0,2,0,0,0,32.0,0,9,1,2,12,14,0,0,21,0,36,5,0,1,1,46,63,22,0,6,15,0,0,5,4,6,5,0,1,2,19,7,0,0,14,4,0,5,11,2,0,2,4,3,33,12,45,49,10,35,0,0,3,0,23,14,0,16,20,195,52,11,0.2512290732792892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936180967321207,0.0,0.0,0.11389625656128337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992192744760169,0.10209794083140113,0.0,0.0,0.09434971148145874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05400732286748933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569818894530236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483429267905841,0.0,0.09339560870425084,0.05531147783438335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469965293830578,0.0,0.21876136948469851,0.0,0.2379654532014762,0.2809587029120259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847910311761073,0.0,0.0,0.08247001031235329,0.0,0.0,0.09453568134147247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720547321633057,0.09204595231095043,0.06826174194012025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830034945569105,0.20456305855600415,0.0,0.0,0.07410994137809374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711953246884577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490228278097714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06156075854931245,0.0,0.06458778303136024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349288127571115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068553475566704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013076463360667,0.0,0.0,0.4690567642454201,0.0,0.08376568647815152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486452194816787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542572346387364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893894303493886,0.0,0.18748691940599305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958657276252056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296433242069488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16097744597200012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887508624448897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056856016549051515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098787611027311,0.06647131487276366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05392776210771492
mentalhealth,LonaZar,2020/01/22,"Me on the daily Me: *driving*

Brain: lets remember when you did this very very very cringe thing

Me: *cringes* Why!?!?

Brain:  What did you learn?

Me: I need to stop existing 

Brain: great! just needed to remind you",-0.6026923076923083,-0.9328822307692288,-0.10198717948717828,101.58240384615385,140.53846153846158,3.351282051282052,13.506410256410255,5.46131890053228,-0.7759589743589741,159,4,33,2,12,47,28,39,0.05,0.823,0.126,0.6504,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,3,3,0,0,6,5,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,8,1,3,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,20,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6692483551512134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203196182768884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043455921955892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963513509051773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22637494747497644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670716338542018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132761991741431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4946562631803534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803206806190526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NamelessHollow,2020/01/22,"I no longer want to be alive. The title says it all I suppose... I know I'm selfish for thinking this way, at least that's what I've been told. I know I'm an attention seeker for posting about it, again... that's what I've been told. I feel nobody cares about me anymore, like I'm invisible to everyone. The voices I hear in my head always tell me such horrible things. They have been telling me to kill myself for a long time now. My emotions have almost run dry. I rarely feel happy about anything, I cant love my partner anymore, I dont get excited about anything, I cant even cry anymore. I feel I'm pushing everyone away, but at the same time feel they never wanted to know me anyway. I haven't achieved anything in life, even though I've tried. I'm unable to focus on previous hobbies or enjoy them. I feel empty. I feel like I'm just here for no reason, like there are no feelings inside me and no longer any ambitions. I dont feel loved and happy, I feel alone and worthless. I want these feelings to go away... I dont want to be hated anymore, I dont want to be me anymore... I dont even know who I am. I just want to die.",1.0402995981001089,2.9323150504201716,2.972542930215564,92.18153635367192,81.26890756302521,5.483668249908661,22.532700036536355,6.498293943080001,0.4479716477895508,874,29,192,8,23,293,117,238,0.209,0.688,0.10300000000000001,-0.9829,0,1,0,0,0,2,39.0,0,0,3,1,17,14,2,0,5,0,18,4,1,1,2,34,54,6,2,6,4,0,10,3,1,0,1,3,0,1,10,3,0,0,17,0,0,3,13,4,0,0,5,13,35,10,24,46,3,18,0,1,0,2,13,7,0,2,9,117,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968852927634973,0.08242155696110696,0.0,0.0,0.06621747894949748,0.0,0.0,0.0541175734511364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3946131225414325,0.0,0.0,0.1964642918454917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14953728756729406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113778021705388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741561126699468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259215437304115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4663396672379322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951752414643689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768681367236406,0.0,0.0,0.15208544992374085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4023836964051236,0.056852434902398614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04157760698654506,0.0,0.04522751943312417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694301713142782,0.0,0.07856941989257224,0.08167270971269369,0.0,0.08969318046272433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804420246141073,0.0,0.17494178423282605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05621016918601459,0.11663726286741025,0.0,0.0,0.0704263742650825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364929399615572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06137750612312686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621626811762193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818221661400978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328572995373816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391139979816746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05286985018814271,0.05099206956334343,0.07818758820466046,0.0,0.09280823828325238,0.0,0.0,0.15208544992374085,0.0,0.0540300400492399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816323884862484,0.06316741873048035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fenris235,2020/01/22,"Need advice on how to support my boyfriend We've only been dating a short while so I've made it clear I won't force him to tell me what's troubling him, but for the past 3 days he's been incredibly quiet, which is really unusual for him.

This month marks a year since a close friend of mine unexpectedly took his own life (my boyfriend doesn't know this, its not a very cheery subject), so when I asked my boyfriend if he was talking to anyone about what's on his mind, I was worried to hear he hasn't been talking to anyone, and has infarct been staying in his room alone all day.

I've messaged him each morning and night to let him know I care, that I'm thinking of him and that if he decides he wants someone to talk to that I'm there regardless of what time it is.

Are there any ways I can try and gently encourage him to confide in someone without making him feel I'm pressuring him into doing so? I don't even care if it's me he talks to or someone else, it would just put me at ease to know he's not facing it alone.

Thanks in advance for anyone who offers their help xx",10.414812775330397,5.199438118942734,9.771404185022025,75.54538821585905,62.08370044052863,12.583480176211454,40.269273127753294,8.472884824447931,3.2860841409691623,851,27,189,7,8,275,131,227,0.073,0.777,0.15,0.9652,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,10,8,0,1,5,0,18,2,1,3,2,32,37,15,0,7,9,0,1,0,1,2,1,2,1,0,16,7,0,0,6,0,0,3,7,2,0,0,8,3,26,6,26,26,3,25,0,0,0,0,33,10,0,4,10,115,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12551422543204752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660589931708884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873464882012317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694335986766819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007802633527452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619149274607473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567181861985206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729868148087823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483620958085007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494526740403968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923570172754118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447659942863492,0.0,0.08609346703757936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21176878670740854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13134293845605907,0.09072396573783116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12153704618064355,0.08573752803795014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12969206774692427,0.0,0.10252296747905884,0.0,0.0,0.09523977695112926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053621882412748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097687632954217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226145614952259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12912193841797748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822846695806103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625040319439444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3264911649255979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369044705119424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575700218744592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129544611000955,0.11226592776100673,0.11825419978765365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230188307486715,0.0,0.0,0.07489686966013605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14270627746896716,0.08720520811847134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597995032783436,0.07575974102697637,0.10195305966232864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12381566446946775,0.0,0.0,0.13044136123957786,0.0,0.09124310333183064,0.0,0.0,0.08271387978630987
mentalhealth,vRisslle,2020/01/22,"What is going on with me?? Hello! I'm a 23 years old male.  
I got a job, a car, a place of my own and all of that stuff. People on first look might see me as a well-set young man READY TO TAKE THE WORLD! haha  
But in reality I have no idea what is going on with me, what I am doing or where I am going with my life. My social life is practically non-existent, the only human interactions I have are at my workplace. No friends who call me, text me, ask me how I'm doing or try to reach out to me whatsoever. I have a history of physical, emotional and verbal abuse for as long as I can remember. All the way up to the time when I moved out of my parents house about 4 years ago.

I dont know what is going on with me, I'm not sad but I am not happy either, I just...am, constantly. This empty feeling is worse than the times I was genuinely sad, because when sad I know what makes me sad and I knew what to do to stop it from making me sad. But this is a huge unknown to me. In early 2019 I've begun to self-harm, I dont know why, I just did. I remember it being in a fit of rage, took a knife and cut my arm. Was really scared at first, and I told myself that that was the last time I am doing that, but lo and behold almost a year later I am still doing it.  


I'm just really lost when it comes to all of this, most of the time I tell myself that I am faking it all for whatever reason. I'm not allowing myself or anyone tell me that I should see someone about this because deep down I believe that nothing is wrong with me and that I am just trying to destroy my life on purpose. And no matter how many times I decide that I will stop with my sh, start going out, meet new people. I never do.   
My current moods are ""empty"" and ""irritable"" and they go back and forth so fast, one moment I can be all calm and nice and the next I am a total asshole to the people around me. One moment I can love you and the next I can see you as my worst enemy...tbh it started to scare the shit out of me...All I'm wondering is why now? I always had the idea that certain events lead to mental health issues, certain life situations but I did not have anything to scar me mentally other than childhood abuse, and I thought I forgot all about that but now I remember it clear as day, every moment of it. Every tiny detail.",2.8258808735124497,3.159272253036441,4.890691939639306,86.66140534903695,73.43319838056682,7.769255306097411,22.86443381180224,7.793537801064563,0.8459900134952765,1759,39,403,22,33,613,220,494,0.126,0.753,0.121,-0.8556,3,0,0,1,2,0,64.0,0,2,1,4,18,24,4,2,23,1,45,8,2,7,11,83,81,35,0,1,17,1,1,0,1,3,5,0,0,3,32,27,0,3,14,0,0,11,10,15,0,4,13,5,68,8,59,63,11,77,0,6,4,1,19,23,1,7,42,288,100,2,0.0,0.18756600175679808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701640886522418,0.0,0.07925999083790841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586138334471939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05534540500013317,0.0,0.06513592404936537,0.07046268023234631,0.07399708534996732,0.0,0.0,0.060863536941377964,0.0,0.09650149686734334,0.0,0.0,0.08917798256086326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082375178281698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818303840952149,0.0,0.08553594419342475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05104694037969952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855327389690025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890361286387119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337911936744773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04002198105550823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465448450670733,0.0,0.0,0.061153176102292525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699058051473893,0.0,0.06330564123011805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425951606827098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413561383991101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913315832219038,0.0,0.17870751716513494,0.0,0.082614849458765,0.07854683670140837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050075407380166,0.0645200111025933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22363155827512726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004764461946461,0.06646832900178627,0.0,0.08640451719415389,0.0,0.07143839790619896,0.0,0.10567007759113513,0.0802484096065028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15953460005677386,0.083968501399328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841267886875129,0.0,0.0,0.06104743828440176,0.0764461664277365,0.16835957900450788,0.0,0.0,0.0759491459751905,0.0,0.08305743888269207,0.0,0.1072718297519802,0.060199191592025525,0.0,0.0,0.08788970112730639,0.0,0.0,0.1646235381639389,0.0,0.08269771987756919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014144869594947,0.08138215371138342,0.0,0.0,0.2689937219023984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15849131274546027,0.0,0.18922335084674685,0.0,0.08257352384068073,0.0,0.08124910435072065,0.0,0.08897094597280476,0.0,0.08068620500389824,0.06706582193357437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204937037047147,0.0,0.06321144477457566,0.13235039511818272,0.0,0.0,0.09061089909135643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951297624977444,0.0,0.1383658891132871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283839868826163,0.2307728660201331,0.0,0.0,0.07563379244792008,0.08794155697032127,0.1074789688845602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06282772533635013,0.0,0.0,0.07116777900139099,0.0,0.14284599232888293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583772170951237,0.0,0.0,0.08066335879412985,0.0,0.08654104679755555,0.0,0.15291522210112735
mentalhealth,MonkOfSunCity,2020/01/22,"This is my first winter i'm not going out drinking 4 times a week in like five years, and this is probably the worst experience of my life so far. This year was great lifestyle-wise, i was hoping that will help me out of anxiety/depression whatever you want to call it, but instead, it's more crippling than ever.
For a while i was asked if i'm alright, but eventually people just stopped reaching out. I have a feeling i'm just a burden, since in the past, anytime i wanted to talk emotions with family or friends, they got annoyed, and i just got a longer list of character flaws i have.

Gym did help for a while, but now it's all the same, and i just feel sick for days after.

I don't have the social skills to meet new people, but i am feeling more isolated than ever.

I mean, after all the fucking work i have put in to overcome being a suicidal broken person, and i'm back on square one... or less.

Tried all the mental exercises, but they just push me even deeper. 

I'm just ready to give up now.",5.851550802139041,5.085586686274514,6.624099821746881,80.6025401069519,66.94117647058823,9.575044563279858,30.80035650623886,8.841846274778883,2.2458490196078444,780,25,163,11,11,259,123,204,0.142,0.725,0.133,-0.8418,0,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,2,3,15,9,2,0,13,1,14,5,0,0,5,37,32,15,1,4,15,0,3,1,1,1,3,0,0,1,7,8,1,1,4,3,0,3,2,4,0,3,6,4,18,5,24,24,8,31,0,0,1,1,13,9,1,4,20,116,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237867750048072,0.0,0.0,0.11710825982849167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551394808376304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822002890159397,0.0,0.13117460275016166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14919469478631833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713154806758625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059182094273576,0.2755256935821044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489773020098341,0.14357361153215414,0.0,0.23102031816588586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12954515257527252,0.0,0.0,0.11766555800433642,0.14079764639028006,0.0,0.14609874120266128,0.0865548316415427,0.0,0.2436142838338995,0.16790979758471844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041651474852875,0.0,0.0,0.15126692203466716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757303941093124,0.07440542673395144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16589787604780873,0.0,0.0,0.1534812166197138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470909837122061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320150571410584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538629290297714,0.2111694133030415,0.13298130539947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642037019729993,0.0,0.0,0.15310220686771514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598301581399945,0.0,0.0,0.15524929268032006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732848959165968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665900023404768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241188465904028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888065666682551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340078515609913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17965937756308886,0.0,0.12216478927892055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087522994445867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961506725972724
mentalhealth,letsgingerale,2020/01/22,"Dissociation question Hey everyone!
I was just thinking back about a time (I was probably 15/16) I never really knew about mental health, but I was a generally happy- sometimes angry- teenage boy.

As I look back, I was definitely disassociating for a couple months at least. I went to the doctor, and he said to get my eyes checked. Regardless, I eventually stopped and haven’t experienced it since.

Why would this happen to a happy, teen who had no anxieties?",4.205677506775069,7.267730109756101,5.807235772357725,69.65551490514908,77.17073170731706,9.01029810298103,28.62330623306233,9.444778638647367,3.382158265582655,367,16,60,11,9,124,64,82,0.13,0.7120000000000001,0.158,0.6643,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,0,7,3,1,0,1,12,14,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,3,2,0,1,3,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,8,4,9,2,8,5,1,8,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,1,6,41,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15352718696513415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086362156751209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22205950332907684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20541456680672224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917677533328964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485216415858127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17746937275422373,0.4272761571345417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21332392729709768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16852893009750008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022481673969728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601887246491356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478438549262924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21637760330062547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22481856353433466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856705772768265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19090200614074435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660127189026497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19848739460446185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16778570201944834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285939532395817,0.0,0.0,0.11702386622314992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604150282056567,0.18109137552754925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142564312320951,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nava_dom_,2020/01/22,"Not sure how to word this correctly. So I’ll just explain it from my perspective. (26m) Growing up I had a pretty tough childhood. Homelessness, stealing to survive, fighting parents,
(Full on fist fights) divorce, broken family, drugs involved in family, deaths, these are just a few that came to mine.. there’s wayyyy more. 

I’m not upset or mad at anyone because of what happened in my past. I believe it made me stronger and the resilience has helped me through a lot. 

Lately though, I’ve been having these moments where  things that has happened to me will randomly just pop in my head. Once that one thing pops in my head, everything  else starts tumbling down from there. Essentially a slippery slope. We shall call these “avalanches” to sum them up. 

I’ve tried almost everything, marijuana, working out, keeping busy and meditating, Meditating for some reason is hard for me since my mind never rest. It will always continue thinking of everything that went wrong and is going wrong in my life. 

I’m not necessarily depressed (at least I don’t think so) I’m usually happy as can be up until these avalanches occur. They don’t last too long and I’ve become better at controlling them. I’m just not sure what can help me. The only solution I have so far is staying busy. I will start researching random stuff or playing games while stoned to calm down and keep busy. I stop myself from letting the avalanches occur by doing those two things.

As a heads ups, I don’t self harm, or ever thought of suicide. 

I Need help understanding what this is and how to help fix the issue instead of just doing damage control every time.

Tl:dr- 
Past keeps coming back to haunt me mentally. Can’t stop negative thoughts, Tried a lot of stuff. Nothings worked. 
Need help understanding  what this is, and how to help it.",3.9378675373134335,6.507117408955227,4.2378871268656715,83.32503964552241,74.91044776119405,6.93376865671642,27.18516791044776,7.972316293177498,1.8926585820895525,1432,56,254,23,32,447,198,335,0.12300000000000001,0.7609999999999999,0.11599999999999999,-0.5494,1,0,1,0,4,1,51.0,1,0,3,6,19,17,3,1,10,0,26,5,3,7,5,57,51,21,2,2,12,1,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,25,11,0,7,8,2,0,5,10,11,0,2,7,1,26,6,40,38,8,44,0,2,0,0,19,19,0,9,19,173,51,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614775031817229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158479263003713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0601549669739454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615262919509378,0.0,0.052443778819374134,0.0950146248382856,0.0,0.09692762381518216,0.0,0.0760875439407903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784740339679542,0.09839669467253004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741082014613164,0.0,0.0,0.19298245711994289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740984868894276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997687986436324,0.0,0.07186797050402971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782008317752975,0.07248493818541428,0.0,0.23195769911244615,0.0,0.16220498707429834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04889347421789361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215408967629332,0.09158173847160876,0.0770669949543846,0.0,0.2648782805265995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3459891210731641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979414895848215,0.0,0.2294052658217217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012685401842758,0.09704686278688784,0.0,0.0,0.08797266002336511,0.060766331921953874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613484351006954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462811817958489,0.0,0.08140473610212991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669914510151049,0.0,0.08686691738242491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758198677313518,0.06635251171860287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254919026838722,0.0,0.0,0.09162034654226084,0.05829692072855495,0.06543055167936332,0.0,0.0,0.09552738964780053,0.0,0.16425289793470269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752458876637632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845433091988468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974923210963028,0.0,0.0,0.07116584041320974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178655435028204,0.09169773861923462,0.0,0.14385175512409298,0.0,0.0,0.19697012398073271,0.09410409367007076,0.0,0.162166645271729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17146578163988138,0.11025054965479228,0.08452514920029029,0.1365982161582844,0.050165444209471166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681898115351888,0.0,0.08403991397261114,0.17912288241275684,0.0,0.0,0.0947511361819674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797517201542006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526337568636725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18812307225812486,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,causticityy,2020/01/22,"Things don't seem real I'm gonna talk to my therapist about this so if it's actually serious don't worry about it o.o

But for the past week nothing has felt real. Right now i know this is really bad but there are also times when I just genuinely am so in that headspace nothing matters.

Like today at school I just didn't write anything in the test I studied hard for because I just didn't feel like I was doing something. It was like I was playing a video game of someone doing a test, instead of actually doing it. Idk how to explain it properly..

I'm stressed about it now because I need the grades lmfao but also I'm worried about my mental health the fucks going on??? I had a really good few months and it's like I just took a huge leap backwards",1.7948076923076923,3.8560027115384656,3.594205128205129,87.81746153846153,79.57692307692308,6.211282051282053,24.5025641025641,7.3011,1.1279825641025645,597,22,122,8,15,200,94,156,0.19,0.711,0.099,-0.863,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,18,10,1,1,8,0,15,2,0,1,0,20,28,11,0,2,8,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,11,1,0,0,5,3,0,2,4,4,0,0,8,3,12,6,14,19,1,17,0,0,0,1,4,7,1,2,12,80,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.2836234845342986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324253338824029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958630253469835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133645933127113,0.177171927286749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347835782470341,0.1038169188335661,0.1395303679558696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13434636301010114,0.0,0.0,0.08258892907740856,0.12188785218770815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017852959541396,0.0,0.0,0.15446878381546786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798642883346949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28398481725220104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14644877788701105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599335241490034,0.0,0.0,0.10775323113882086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27887767558061044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13872475985070634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3308128471412518,0.18619193165583894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124102822845663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707199747195884,0.0,0.13229422925763787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312949863746925,0.11187473936198368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16646402085947815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680302842256447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16872817852828406,0.09654441283206394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473749064116314,0.0,0.13774674207366053,0.0,0.16145630526796398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656725483907952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951598291735396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gaaandaaaalf,2020/01/22,"Talking to someone with anxiety Hello. My boyfriend has anxiety and he tends to isolate himself at times. I'd like to help in any way I can. I'd appreciate any advice/tips on how to talk to him, especially when it's particularly worse. Thanks a lot.",2.502244897959187,4.939483714285718,4.848326530612244,77.75738775510206,79.20408163265307,8.001632653061224,30.20816326530613,8.841846274778883,2.849070204081633,198,10,38,5,5,69,40,49,0.157,0.64,0.203,0.5401,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,9,4,1,6,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,3,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3966096288165667,0.0,0.4461617366742908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19546005058978536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246592675295602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479164122744543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24708022497463894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4687701787097856,0.0,0.2684753288290764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17004014864910424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314664618011469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971755249313681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hehehoohooo,2020/01/22,"Best mental health tips??? I have been in and out of major depressive episodes and suicidal thoughts and actions. I am trying to get my life together and just need some advice for things to do to help. Therapist and stuff is all under way, and also I am a university student and I really struggle with going to class every day. Any advice would be great :)",3.039296375266524,5.68049928358209,4.345842217484009,80.95283582089553,78.55223880597015,7.410660980810236,24.49680170575693,8.418075326091056,2.002507036247335,280,10,49,6,7,92,53,67,0.121,0.698,0.18100000000000002,0.7047,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,1,0,8,2,0,0,1,15,12,8,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,9,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,5,2,10,8,4,7,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,38,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4227617324847154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17298731523143607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471018625629823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270096247123712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395055118703281,0.0,0.1863121025894066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18225502039657127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301584750755328,0.0,0.12293700407175845,0.0,0.0,0.2384884480493081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299331123071345,0.0,0.0,0.14499162606922142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527899359661602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21799500495429414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603950985106296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857715868096754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261397813615905,0.2476293341921296,0.23661389442545994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511588054533338,0.14371031330744782,0.0,0.0,0.17173023317189634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468639301200749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717010641088593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366422534603605,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aytemon,2020/01/22,"Isolated for months Hello.

I’m a 24 year old man who has started university later than most. This past year has brought mental health to the forefront, as I’ve had some manic periods which ended up with me getting hospitalized. Nothing too crazy, but my state of mind was definitely warped for some time.

Now that uni started, my social anxiety started to kick in since last november. I completely stopped going to any lectures or events and this trend has continued up until this day. Basically, I’ve been stuck at home for days on end and it’s starting to have a toll on me. I’m dreading for the day that I have to go back, which I know I must. So far I have postponed that date for over three months. It’s like voluntary isolation. 

Idk how I’m going to make a good transition to ”normal life” from here. Every time people ask about me I notice myself getting anxious as hell and come up with lies to buy more time. It’s ridiculous that I’ve let myself go like this. I’m also having an appointment coming up with a psychiatrist next monday.

Any feedback and further questions are greatly appreciated.",3.766233474681968,6.057539886255928,4.735365427787478,80.8920678473435,74.30805687203791,7.4752806186081315,27.69294088301321,8.371475516178862,2.1363971563981043,880,35,159,16,19,286,137,211,0.163,0.7490000000000001,0.08800000000000001,-0.9457,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,8,7,2,1,7,0,13,2,0,2,1,22,34,12,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,14,9,0,1,2,0,1,7,0,3,0,1,5,0,13,4,32,27,4,49,1,0,0,0,6,11,1,5,32,97,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367622612898804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632467382560546,0.0,0.09917727278495403,0.14646077050902814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12119959979622386,0.0,0.0,0.0996882010229198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22335358018606646,0.13592922306286467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508288826072261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296521323035016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923062585541804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354672340763983,0.0,0.2947185952151885,0.10873920079799226,0.0,0.14293292104124314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780546460417242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004346008948767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07124892866633778,0.1056771288693154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256973038919848,0.09157136134674564,0.12667497832028565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653834846271519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306506167714899,0.0,0.13090343993315967,0.0,0.2069611403120302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787781978642555,0.0,0.12702355252177153,0.1243968739244692,0.1476005051092243,0.13603952513902695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375982713870848,0.08987879656855785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14523090303106914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724282150834363,0.0,0.0,0.13215568842067724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3670506421190008,0.0,0.0,0.10838815370450892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22678930290175334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16697291642190795
mentalhealth,sinrith,2020/01/22,"I'm so so tired. I work in IT, I hate every moment. I used to enjoy it, but I've gotten older and gotten sick of the constant stupid questions and lack of... I don't know. People only talk to me when they want something. 


I'm new to office IT, so I have a lot of questions. almost all are met with ""figure it out yourself"" or I'm just plain ignored. I'm very isolated here, and often can't find anyone to ask in person... The rare times I do they meet my eyes with a scary glare that makes me regret asking. 

I've been here almost a year and I just feel so useless. Ive been so tired lately I'm falling asleep at my desk..which makes me feel even worse. I feel bad for eating and taking my lunch break - I don't deserve it. I feel bad for leaving after working 8.5 hours, because everyone else is staying longer. 

Lately I've been so burned out from work I can't even work on the things I truly care about at home. (3D modeling and art stuff) I've got no energy for it. My last job was similar and I was only there half a year before moving to a new state and taking this one. I'd find a new IT job but they all sound horrible...and I'm getting worried about my work history being so short at these places. I plan on moving to yet another state at this time next year so that will be yet another job hop. 

I really need to money I'm making here as I'm helping put my bf through college. I'm also paying rent and for a car. 

I just wish I could stay awake..and focus and maybe at least learn something new - but my brain is so stupid and fogged up now that I can't even study up on stuff at work so I feel less awful about myself. 

I just want to go back to bed, or take a day off...but I'm already out of time off to do that. 

I don't know if I want to rant or if I want advice, but thanks for reading.",1.1850447923969796,2.5634479048843204,3.143005375087636,93.52428760613851,78.94858611825192,5.743429150112956,19.242891641349228,6.273863323946077,-0.14650882604970006,1381,29,322,10,33,466,190,389,0.184,0.7440000000000001,0.071,-0.9945,4,0,2,0,0,0,51.0,0,0,3,7,31,11,3,0,11,1,22,8,3,4,2,62,63,33,0,11,13,0,5,0,1,1,3,1,3,1,17,16,2,1,13,2,3,6,7,8,0,2,9,7,38,3,46,50,6,55,0,2,1,0,13,19,0,11,25,190,55,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655484265520253,0.0,0.0,0.15689628432204886,0.0,0.08645228519025827,0.06265002568257427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16429672168046322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054778509983543326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647828771282964,0.0,0.0,0.060240120493634634,0.13082450465030476,0.047756522963034814,0.0,0.06666322564487068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745552065280468,0.0,0.0,0.07987483487145319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846598118297273,0.0,0.0625496689097429,0.0,0.0,0.05052407391746403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016336855265575,0.06544464302435944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15523234884898135,0.0,0.06600646812367145,0.07485908639916296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980602083230816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432062381954589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04093043319051072,0.0,0.044523533139583404,0.0,0.06265721065967969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734645220853628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05251095483412758,0.0,0.07858335916202147,0.0,0.07715103574414701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332268782790637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861093690900443,0.06385914191635655,0.17674625419861406,0.08295280882616397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660352071075927,0.0,0.0,0.15688157129595126,0.0,0.07870501434197047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653018020163654,0.0,0.058089560079049474,0.0,0.3026525573969729,0.08331754803584324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05308652992066522,0.11916515987612965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05431244098655137,0.0684051652069372,0.08185065903698407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875529363223162,0.17552181719037166,0.0,0.07836314615618324,0.0,0.050187856483959584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062291450218254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700418080514293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17936556939033196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17671018020235654,0.06296828842400252,0.0,0.07212673804023832,0.0,0.0,0.052046907644741874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13704545566358425,0.18008508406279009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766228761413369,0.0,0.06464030984556415,0.18483243740556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008937127711113,0.0,0.0,0.3422032171630979,0.07956004868016033,0.07983713562128142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15134893349289244
mentalhealth,wheniamhere,2020/01/22,"I can't see a way out. I'm at a very low point in my life and my only options are to die or keep living a life I don't want to live. A life that's not mine, that makes me unhappy, basically as an object used by others. I am 22 and a student, I live with my partner. I have been with my partner for around 4 years now, two of which we've lived together. My partner is destroying me. I'm a person who wants to please everyone and doesn't know how to put himself first. My partner uses me. I just realised now that they are pretty narcissistic and self centred. They don't care about my feelings yet talk about theirs the whole time, when they say they're feeling bad I try to be there for them and give everything I can to help them, whenever I tell them that I feel bad it quickly converts into a conversation how they feel as bad or worse than me or how they're superior at dealing with things than me. I've gotten better at telling people if I don't want to do something but even if I tell them I don't want to go shopping for example and I don't actually need anything from the shops they still ask me to do it and right now my self esteem is so low that I just do whatever they want me to. Its difficult cause I don't have the energy to argue. And I'm just feeling worse due to their actions or words they say (on top of that I'm transgender so I feel euphoric about certain things and they for example tell me how they find those very disgusting. Other things they do include ignoring me without telling me what's going on, telling me they wish I would be gone/not live with them and that of course they'll still want to be happy when I'm gone and also will be happy even if something were to happen to me) I'm really trying my best to give them their space and have slept in another room for a while now. (I just also can't go from 0 to 100 when they occasionally tell me how they need a hug right now and I get up in the middle of the night and hug them cause I care about them too much and not enough about myself. It's just that I need someone, I need to be cared for right now. I need to feel like there's someone who cares about me being alive. My family doesn't really give a fuck about me since I've come out to them as trans. So even they wouldn't care and I don't have any friends really or anyone who'd care if I'd be gone. I hate my work, I don't like uni and I hate the people that I have to see there. I can't pretend to be okay anymore. I don't have the chance to move out or do something else. I'm literally stuck. I'm dependent on my partner, I mean they even said that I wouldn't be able to live on my own. I just don't know what to do or where to go. I just don't have any choice. I'm talking to a therapist which is good in some ways I guess but she can't really help. I've also made an appointment with my doctor to get medication but I'll have to wait till the end of February and I don't know if I can last that long. I haven't really eaten in a few days and am just not hungry. I'm feeling bad every day and that makes my head hurt so I take painkillers. Nothing helps. What am I meant to do? I literally have no reason to be here. I have no place in this world. I have no energy.",3.100735450065496,3.412296830703013,4.574154138855967,89.2558304223068,72.80200860832137,8.069477886594724,24.47785540515252,8.112205042999317,1.0388021583182585,2509,65,597,35,46,842,260,697,0.14,0.7390000000000001,0.121,-0.7938,0,0,3,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,28,5,51,34,6,0,22,1,65,11,2,14,1,109,139,55,1,20,27,0,8,2,6,5,5,3,1,8,31,31,1,3,15,3,2,10,28,15,0,2,11,13,106,19,83,112,7,69,0,3,2,3,64,32,1,16,27,399,137,3,0.0552996323132702,0.0,0.05396446406988878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266928794514596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521129255643465,0.05798648614422839,0.0,0.0,0.0548423758002931,0.03866678869393319,0.0,0.04550688555978282,0.04922839696169469,0.0516976913112704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18469153245758305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05803355239658646,0.04890803090413422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33828996402404604,0.11361591074103684,0.0,0.04763573667380255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713273760352426,0.057011492716275126,0.0,0.0,0.05739228765519022,0.0,0.0,0.056601516918689365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046195746903904905,0.0,0.04897906042908963,0.05713930270311327,0.0,0.14609954239864548,0.0,0.04659232527751477,0.05284116848900987,0.04969974378229156,0.0,0.05213157180370985,0.0,0.2236892453250217,0.039506068373989234,0.0,0.0,0.05054286209701951,0.04703783899583737,0.0,0.0,0.04272435874856352,0.05112361898721477,0.05778355095106055,0.15914533881595153,0.12571222169663282,0.04638270791108669,0.0,0.0,0.06091877952874079,0.0,0.048901282224784536,0.11773497377992133,0.0,0.10919387638222937,0.05675337669772385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119853362009298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05919940012555544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04915285406465859,0.0,0.0,0.09117369512714718,0.04507658107892057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171792971218462,0.05403321411188386,0.0,0.2929835308130842,0.048938434419299084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052325849183988096,0.07382586795558033,0.0,0.0,0.060237511231877115,0.0,0.055708561739234205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058774757573305386,0.0406515926074981,0.20501988330596546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05189495882617545,0.0,0.05306148864391382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04205786227111085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667560434592363,0.04828550592969488,0.057776345840605065,0.06070239011205419,0.052276026956827135,0.0,0.0,0.056259606639277066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05559140433576985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17713180243947035,0.05685723215879768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14167675153042555,0.05260261381829847,0.08795297436046016,0.0,0.0,0.08813329457229002,0.0,0.11537915380882564,0.0,0.0,0.045744427300169664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371039800988827,0.1277170759510471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832471559764947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041578441375423235,0.0888954994811289,0.3383402125022983,0.0,0.0,0.06420713533449489,0.11021585548839236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032245660309730764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508964075502042,0.0,0.054019705419217336,0.0,0.0,0.09552225420186966,0.0,0.09125597620890688,0.19570293541461334,0.08778854828852647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06174006461404461,0.06359184804018693,0.05330687217801147,0.0,0.04025879093950283,0.0,0.11271009941396333,0.03928327217138503,0.0,0.0,0.03561115014008196
mentalhealth,tommybxy,2020/01/22,"How necessary is a diagnosis? If I'm in therapy and taking medication to treat the symptoms/behaviour I'm experiencing, is there any real need to get a diagnosis? One of the doctors said she thinks I have EUPD, and then the psychiatrist today has given me anti-psychotics, and I feel like any diagnosis would be a long process for it to be accurate however if I'm treating my symptoms and taking the right medication is there really any need to label anything? I know if I continue they will eventually put a label on it but I also know it's avoidable too.",4.933855140186914,6.5505526074766385,7.601950934579438,64.38273948598132,69.65420560747664,10.957476635514018,33.935747663551396,10.9516,4.4485897196261694,447,22,75,15,8,163,68,107,0.0,0.956,0.044000000000000004,0.4836,1,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,1,8,0,9,4,0,1,0,18,23,11,0,6,4,0,1,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,3,9,3,8,17,0,8,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,5,52,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15297916521845845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3902630682520008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574201265218038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19579933553045856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672489357234694,0.13666174262007869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09994414899746502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21026231445818988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345745481415302,0.0,0.0,0.1692907445389639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38542074367261175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836867922074037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962697051003647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19230509397451734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177364762862528,0.12254897432796168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16336554989990387,0.18196609196152708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19882956005167352,0.2876612372560599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21876339468649925,0.0,0.0,0.12257461089035572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813260307041452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358910327380224,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,summerlikefroot,2020/01/22,"What to doafter an overdose? This past week I got out of hospital post an (intentional) overdose of pills, Everything feels a bit surreal at the moment, and the overdose was the culmination of a lot of mental stress and build up over the past couple of months. 

I’m in therapy and have a lot of supportive people around me who keep saying that the most important thing right now is self care. Though I’m not too sure what the next steps might be. 

Some light advice would be muchly appreciated as I feel quite lost.",8.02704081632653,7.229019051020413,7.707061224489795,74.71651020408162,62.57142857142857,11.513469387755105,32.865306122448985,10.793553405168565,3.2636506122448985,409,13,79,9,5,130,73,98,0.07200000000000001,0.8220000000000001,0.106,0.5327,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,1,11,0,7,1,0,1,1,17,16,5,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,6,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,4,3,3,14,9,6,16,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,5,7,53,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17018280915606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15503538202185885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013277850119545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17756321230419966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19269982769792526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15651979831217366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17611657977676398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392881201777595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547974741754964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901113793491568,0.2961216785538137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17550785454051132,0.18475154009642367,0.0,0.0,0.13900931586473952,0.0,0.12802438386536238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18521642635459296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3325023987817731,0.12073754525032522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16679289673195472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18523588783577055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872790674202874,0.0,0.13849550078324632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816822432998264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19949461907954344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197629679034708,0.16413956536912525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991620741547936,0.0,0.11570122337997188,0.0,0.17110696505127487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13969709479083606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237151214348556,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,docmisterio,2020/01/22,"How do you love yourself and how do you remind yourself that you’re worth a damn? long story short: partner left 4 months ago. she blocked me on all social media. I got all of the emotions cause I saw her on the dance floor of the bar I frequent. Over the course of a few days of hearing my cries and parsing my cursings my friends (and over a year of therapy) helped me realize that her rejection isn’t a rejection of me but i’m seeing it as a rejection from a person who validated all of the vulnerable parts of me and to some large extent my emptiness comes from the fact that I can’t or don’t validate those vulnerable / exposed parts of me myself. 

I realize I have a lot of work to do in order to find out how to validate those parts of me but if you would, internet friend, please tell me ways in which you’ve either discovered this validation and ways you keep it foregrounded such that it becomes second nature.",5.59445158102767,5.726105233695653,6.389071146245063,79.04920948616603,67.31521739130434,9.951778656126482,31.944664031620555,9.800150414767053,2.8782673913043486,729,28,146,15,11,241,106,184,0.127,0.758,0.115,-0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,4,0,1,4,7,1,0,13,0,8,2,0,4,4,28,16,13,0,2,5,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,2,12,7,1,2,3,2,1,2,3,4,0,1,2,3,25,3,25,13,11,21,0,3,2,1,17,10,1,4,6,107,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487498368849536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18050076483643274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16789243761876307,0.0,0.14078450625034758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17952532285935016,0.10540184867947078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18384201850255236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493763376335393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25253845836238176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071364449782613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18420276364219876,0.0,0.10954682166926588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14526825390933878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17757225919127154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14463454976177778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389463213703534,0.1475061805860445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045200317615388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5309514990320454,0.0,0.0,0.14270485954505724,0.0,0.1794022013065962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023628085718267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16660107554112533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428491149346037,0.0,0.1869018012828072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594536851580176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898239432016405,0.0,0.0,0.11609930826551003,0.0,0.0,0.10524657619571627
mentalhealth,Thaurwen,2020/01/22,"Looking for Direction/Advice So to start, I'm not asking for a diagnosis, of course. I'm asking what you guys think of my experience and where you'd reccomend I look for more information.

Last fall I finally went to counseling during a double depression episode. I was prescribed an antidepressant and had a few talk therapy sessions and things really started to seem like they were getting better for the first time in a very, very long time. My baseline mood has improved dramatically, I'm able to enjoy time with the people I care about and get work done and most of the time life actually seems normal. 

But I've still got these weird moments, and they can be very short or can last the whole day, where I feel very disconnected from everything. Sort of like a ghost riding around in a glass box in my skull. It's like I'm aware of everything going on, but I'm not participating in it, if that makes sense. I remember staring at my face in the mirror for an hour just trying to make it click in my brain that it was my face. It was like I had this weird realization that I was somewhere behind the face, but it was so disconnected. I don't know how else to explain it. When I get stressed out during these episodes, things get weird.

 I can recall a time I was called on to answer a question in lecture and it suddenly hit me that 200+ plus people were listening to me. I've never had a problem presenting assignments in class before or anything like that but suddenly I was just absolutely terrified. My heart was beating so fast it was ridiculous, I broke out in this cold sweat, and then it was like a veil of watery blackness went over my eyes and I just retreated into my own head. I was still in my head, but I was way in the back. I can't remember answering the question, I just remember hearing my own voice, really loud and echoing in my skull, but it was like listening to someone else talk. 

That's an extreme example, but it's like even during normal times when I'm not stressed, like sometimes I'll just be waiting for something and I'll stop paying attention to what's going on around me. I'll fall back into my head and it's like everything is a dream almost. I'll catch a glimpse of myself in a reflection and be surprised at how I look, like it takes me a minute to realize that it's me.

Does anyone have an idea what this might be? I thought these kinds of numb moments were because of my depression, since it was difficult to feel anything at all before I got help for that, but now I am able to have pretty normal days and so these moments are standing out a lot more. Should I talk to my doctor about my medication?",5.883492769744159,6.0290854904214575,6.4165603757261165,79.05060622914351,66.70114942528735,9.800617970584602,31.589667531825484,9.618343705623,2.736677468792485,2094,77,415,40,31,683,231,522,0.08900000000000001,0.8059999999999999,0.105,0.6866,0,0,1,0,1,0,46.0,0,2,2,4,25,29,1,2,27,0,39,16,12,4,2,80,79,35,1,6,19,0,2,11,0,2,4,5,0,1,36,23,0,2,20,1,1,8,6,12,0,1,26,15,50,16,63,45,10,73,1,3,7,0,19,30,0,12,44,276,86,7,0.13945018621731894,0.0,0.06804163290845205,0.0,0.0,0.06813455401787982,0.0,0.0,0.06981960897949016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04875340629073922,0.0,0.1147556213309416,0.12414023088976413,0.1303670997217848,0.0,0.0,0.10722858545482776,0.0,0.04250376959412229,0.0,0.11866183747940555,0.0,0.0,0.06166617870501881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783626338203152,0.07119711579669627,0.0,0.07108937935813801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993383368410239,0.0,0.12010824105061725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136658730188214,0.061016898848498737,0.07135297828542313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164927367275061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04605276640525502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879932533583173,0.06820452025666877,0.0,0.0,0.07051020416075249,0.0,0.0,0.07638043136491042,0.0,0.05930812857914543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14571393340873404,0.0,0.07925275445810483,0.0,0.111531052934938,0.0,0.0,0.06903880434109552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146741836580004,0.0,0.07858524739887278,0.08262457104699572,0.04673526016885062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866517166158305,0.0,0.0,0.07871114315217419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260795488626216,0.038319087703803566,0.11367051393553512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04924889527862419,0.3747057439663911,0.0,0.0,0.06170451328044044,0.1756545524935348,0.0,0.0,0.05927778076805714,0.0,0.0,0.09308408214850272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024069585514227,0.0,0.07396730522319049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377629022104194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20494736162244032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667720070716156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093548631495733,0.0,0.0667174975254772,0.0,0.0,0.15621612323777778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933536011690986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23695481519259265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269502121495336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057677317538714336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05907784512448783,0.053677783134889225,0.06895989995047852,0.0,0.0987035595507878,0.0,0.11136509884829994,0.05829329992183729,0.15973971715894078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05242459262280917,0.16812716610346565,0.0,0.0,0.07973672057187077,0.0,0.09264450732022436,0.04467702428816469,0.0,0.05535393555979764,0.24394357503603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047338761345463776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230122016068478,0.0,0.05534453347371255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927171971508647,0.0,0.07784557642919238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0507606982049551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saur_vapi,2020/01/22,"Why i am like this.I want to be like my old self. I always try to force people whom i love away from my life.Whether it is friends, family etc...because i feel that,if i am present in their life then something  bad will come because of me to their life.Few days i feel like normal people then again a loop of self pity comes in my mind.Despite the fact that i am good at some activities/job..i feel total empty while doing them.I will laugh at jokes..and just a second later i will curse myself for that laughter...feeling that i dont deserve this smile.I never allow myself to love someone.I tried loving in past and had some bad experiences so i feel that...same thing will happen with me again or i will ruin if i ever tried.These things have made me a silent person..i was not like this 5 years back.I am in a feedback loop of hell.I want to be saved...",1.9446666666666663,3.42370635555556,3.184444444444445,93.605,77.1111111111111,5.466666666666668,19.777777777777786,5.6839178017228535,-0.2623222222222221,664,14,150,3,15,215,107,180,0.111,0.6970000000000001,0.192,0.9265,1,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,2,0,5,15,0,0,5,0,17,4,0,2,4,24,30,7,0,4,4,0,4,4,1,5,1,0,0,2,9,4,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,4,0,1,3,4,22,11,18,20,3,22,0,2,0,3,9,7,0,4,17,88,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736876138194752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212341031494246,0.09922115574944278,0.21548028864124202,0.1573189882137707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223071551039638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321791135512037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122989654376245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439098824649659,0.0,0.11672096313240612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262225235649282,0.12164419223891512,0.0,0.3262238291815517,0.0921837498777906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969333225676476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822975104111787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410661082844648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804888295405795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734270318796802,0.2521629967138155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34938162131304273,0.1220975205038526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302901493704319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952095600285674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642843946709906,0.0,0.0,0.13540217170531785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318000483558378,0.17891541790088095,0.11266975390231936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26922656426187697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933865411206662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714523240451179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752147188185252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152218221918265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643543215948132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309531908609608
mentalhealth,more_than_ashes,2020/01/22,"[TRIGGER WARNING: rape] I was raped and forced to perform oral sex almost 10 years ago... why does it still affect me? I don’t get it. I was 17 when it happened, I’m 27 now. the part that affects me the most is when he forced me to perform oral sex on him, that made me feel even more shame than being repeatedly vaginally and anally raped for about 3 hours while he called me dirty names. I just don’t understand why I still feel so much shame from something that happened so long ago and why I can’t just stop letting it affect me.",3.358279816513761,4.468184770642203,3.797144495412845,92.10654243119266,72.8532110091743,6.55091743119266,24.634174311926607,6.6274283507984215,0.6035587155963302,416,12,92,3,8,130,68,109,0.253,0.747,0.0,-0.9837,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,11,5,3,2,2,0,8,6,1,5,0,18,16,8,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,2,13,0,7,11,4,14,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,2,13,55,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3298398558075622,0.0,0.18629974714600045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18997535025361426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16281146504913308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228826523390175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18814246310402324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720216621977468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3290424686568265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18321936065335795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19024622532315588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16464622747013588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17604269056709884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676635640060364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20147136680971606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432284937076245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971556280474478,0.1555440827366197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19368206121640344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5036369289919667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980852260620953
mentalhealth,Winslar,2020/01/22,Mental health triage I’m going to a mental health triage appointment in the uk tomorrow and I’m a little apprehensive as I don’t know what to expect at all. Does anyone have any experience with this?,3.0096153846153832,5.588599641025642,4.8535256410256435,77.63105769230769,78.23076923076924,8.002564102564103,20.006410256410245,8.841846274778883,1.6385333333333336,162,4,29,4,4,55,31,39,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,5,6,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,6,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,16,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18944427773832245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19478994729643967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437876533182652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725051625510539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832370534204415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5922360414777138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531005450113416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27921082432964905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5614871973010729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheKingOfSpears,2020/01/22,"Mental Venting I'm not entirely sure why I'm even posting here but I kinda just want to get some stuff out there.

I've been struggling, well I dont even know if struggling is the right word but regardless, ""living"" with a constant longing emptyness. It's been an on going thing since as long as  I can remember and has only gotten worse as I got older. Being on a more or less constant verge of tears but never really being able to cry.

My emotional state has rapidly detiorated after I immigrated, which has resulted in many wasted hours sitting in silence staring into nothingness.

I don't really form connections with people but I did have some I would call friends, due to continuous exposure or near lifelong 'brotherhood' however as I got older our paths diverged and I've felt more alone than ever, and while I'm partly to blame I lack the ability to reach out and I've at this point found myself unable to care about them or their problems. 

The net result is I end up trying to distract myself, and try to fill the 'void' with pointless activities in an effort to experience some form of joy to no avail.

The net result is I constantly feel empty and stressed out, wanting to scream out but unable to. Wishing I could actually connect with someone and have someone to bond with, but I can't. Connecting with people is something I can't wrap my head around, hell my oldest friend openly told his girlfriend to stay away from me because I don't understand how others feel. 

I'm at a stage where I despise myself, but I'm terrified of death so I keep moving on despite life being utterly meaningless.

I'm sorry if this post was long pointless and rambly, but thank you if you read it.",5.909285714285716,6.780881092592592,6.597513227513229,75.2416666666667,66.77777777777777,9.38130511463845,31.78659611992945,9.48565724429506,2.9972188712522043,1350,53,236,26,21,444,195,324,0.213,0.696,0.091,-0.993,1,1,1,0,0,0,25.0,1,2,2,1,12,15,2,4,10,0,24,2,1,4,3,65,48,29,1,11,16,0,3,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,8,21,0,1,7,1,0,3,9,8,1,0,10,5,31,7,48,33,10,48,1,0,1,0,11,22,1,10,17,168,39,1,0.10565194657579102,0.0,0.10310105938145472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942355369256568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405263196588566,0.0,0.0,0.0992634816573639,0.0,0.0,0.06440444600668781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10788245004966164,0.0,0.10771920086714587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425166621203403,0.0,0.0843544823636326,0.0,0.11605370228029205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238232945321875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884421953452533,0.09357626550701027,0.0,0.0,0.13956422857214112,0.09556823436589618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334787677020812,0.0,0.0,0.10684159734904317,0.0,0.1014424371504728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584190616415067,0.16325286368694222,0.0,0.05519878146256635,0.0,0.06004443598908633,0.0,0.16899902633131586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842937777408664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040458854131829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390830453027768,0.0,0.0,0.058063546800950834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462509436574298,0.0,0.0,0.0932926044598146,0.2804959441401147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711449109912362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064723125453617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229129900832636,0.0,0.0,0.0814852944351556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035306622993728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441076243454767,0.0,0.1464915138699402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987523924118294,0.0,0.2023707198482307,0.0,0.0,0.10109464426597893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10568053749299526,0.0,0.13536668469831858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11968305985426765,0.09022618510329697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739638198458534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903710296028447,0.08133603016113987,0.0,0.1182687043393312,0.0,0.11261091761099655,0.0,0.0,0.12102394784190235,0.22090070811594287,0.12094620182252433,0.0,0.0,0.09957570930825428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727011762030192,0.0,0.0,0.07019045871106339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095496256787136,0.0,0.143461473098095,0.0,0.0,0.10998740240141568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246325108758967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499378826033666,0.0,0.09533444867558924,0.0,0.121494524479603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766835965904413,0.07505211154500703,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fullmoon247,2020/01/22,Why me My step father sexually assaulted me. I told my mother. I didn't talk for about a month to anyone. I feel disgusting. I wonder what's wrong with me. Why it couldn't have been someone else. I was raised with it being ingrained in my mind that things like that aren't okay to do . I can't even wrap my head around the situation as a whole. I get to go to therapy in Hope's that I can be normal again.,0.4567816091954029,2.4275585862069,2.6926436781609238,92.9750574712644,83.82758620689657,6.16551724137931,17.712643678160926,7.3871296695380915,0.11551954022988475,315,7,74,5,9,107,61,87,0.14400000000000002,0.8240000000000001,0.031,-0.8429,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,2,0,3,1,11,1,1,0,0,9,17,1,0,3,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,4,1,15,3,12,10,1,7,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,3,51,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508973457090372,0.0,0.0,0.1974515928533319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852878495377964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649871386327165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11215020323522022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158828529891642,0.0,0.12605569116157564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22763375044469406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22030031189861704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836168605772653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239576852509624,0.0,0.17704094691800645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21731973437562616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493157362460588,0.0,0.0,0.18793286493128952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827675745463875,0.0,0.0,0.25365092964580743,0.0,0.14735598128325042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119421620514029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40028520949029994,0.2476350003920801,0.0,0.0,0.24053576762275644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425066358677609,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PsychSoclWrkr,2020/01/22,"Are you in crisis? It's OK to not be OK: Crisis Text Line serves anyone, in crisis, providing access to free, 24/7 support and information via a medium people already use and trust: text. Here’s how it works:

Text HOME to 
741741 in the US
686868 in Canada
85258 in the UK
#CrisisTextLine",4.798818181818183,6.208236109090913,5.219772727272726,82.12965909090909,69.72727272727272,7.6818181818181825,22.84090909090909,8.07648339933343,1.1614545454545449,226,5,42,3,4,72,41,55,0.11599999999999999,0.623,0.261,0.8504,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,1,0,1,2,5,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,2,0,6,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,8,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,22,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4111429232769172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605112944998893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37372050878342894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25829480051768505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4227907600474138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4481587402230622,0.3217829426261735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27123715459452785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DiggityDark,2020/01/22,"no control Since we stopped talking my anxiety and depression have been through the roof, the nightmares happen almost everyday. Quit alcohol the day I ghosted you, cold turkey. If I can't feel any control on the inside, atleast I can control my outside. I've rearranged my room everyday for the last week, I can't sleep or eat if I don't. This depression is suffocating, I haven't been to work in a week. Everyday I think about ending it, but I guess that's not new, the only difference is that I'm sober now.",4.788357142857142,5.941482950000005,5.793428571428574,78.97100000000002,69.5,9.714285714285717,34.285714285714285,9.957137785484203,3.5246714285714287,405,20,77,10,7,134,69,100,0.10300000000000001,0.897,0.0,-0.7269,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,1,1,0,5,2,2,0,0,7,0,10,3,1,3,0,16,15,5,1,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,2,2,4,3,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,2,2,13,0,6,13,0,14,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,5,11,48,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186251883713477,0.17451583832147924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118516099926972,0.0,0.13332341205396595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5864081504375889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239592005919184,0.0,0.3002135171284633,0.0,0.0,0.18208508175610694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783315331665177,0.0,0.0,0.1543599909757583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812099902297554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19198862076835105,0.0,0.1541148690234492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420611295439982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16832031747118242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254748424640256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18536780025692445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416588075363912,0.0,0.17440545620445275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457055439450148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007933571488926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116713264557026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795931551516524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687761977618042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,violaa_,2020/01/22,"Tired i feel like a parasite of all bad as attached to me and it is taking control over my whole body.  the way i am now is not how i used to be. this isn’t me. it’s a virus, a sickness slowly devouring me. my cries can’t be heard.

i feel like a rotting apple all pretty and shiny first. taste sweet. but slowly i loose the vibrant colors, dull out, and taste bad. all the juices get drained and then i’m just dry to the point where i need to be thrown away. I’ve lost my purposefulness just like a rotten apple. im not full of light and kindness as i used to be.

i constantly feel tired. i feel like i’m not a useful human that belongs in a society. i don’t belong anywhere. my hands and head no longer function with creativity. 

i feel empty. hallow. i feel like i’m sitting in an empty bathtub. naked, exposed, and cold. but at the same time i feel suffocated. I feel wrapped in tight blankets or tape or vines of negativity. I am trying hard to rip it all off me but it’s impossible. My hands became scarred and cut from the struggle to escape.

i need sleep. my eyes feel swollen. no matter how much sleep i get, i feel like i’ve had none once i wake up. i don’t feel awake. do i even wake up? i feel like im stuck in this constant loop of a dream. more like a nightmare. I want to wake up. i’m too tired.

everyday and everything feels like it’s repeating itself. wake up, switching from class to class at school, go home, rest, try to do homework, talk to boyfriend, and sleep. same thing. every. single. everyday. my past therapist once said to add new things to my routine. i do, but i end up failing to keep them up. too tired to do anything else. 

i’m toxic. poison. i am constantly starting problems. fights and arguments. i take my frustration out on my loved one. it’s hard to control it. i don’t know why. i am hurting my partner and it ends up hurting me. i am destroying myself and giving a poor image of myself. my insecurity takes over and continues to put me down and hurt him.

i’m too tired to talk to people. i feel like i use up all my energy just by looking at something or even grabbing a pencil. i get tired of acting kind. i get tired of doing anything. everything and everyone is irritating. happy people annoy me. their high pitched laughter echo in my ears everyday. i simply do not want or feel the need to exist in this constant moving world of sociable people.

i feel utterly embarrassed to walk past the students at this new, mind wrenching school i have recently moved into. i feel like everyone is watching my every move. i feel pity from them as i sit alone in embarrassment. i want to hide. i am embarrassed. i envy their social lives. 

i need and WANT hobbies and friends so desperately but my bad side throws them away. that side purposely makes me isolated.

i want to laugh. i want to feel joy run through my veins. I want to feel relaxed and no longer have my body tense. No longer feel the intense pressure in the sides of my head. i want to take a fresh breath of air and have it run cleanly through my lungs. i want to think with an open mind. i want the virus detoxed out. 

the only time when i true do feel relieved is when i’m with my lover. he fills the empty void in my heart. that is the only thing that makes me feel something but i can’t depend on him the rest of my life. I need more to complete my life, but it’s hard to get.

i feel this unexplainable constant worry and anxiety everyday. i have this deep and dark feeling in my chest that wants to take over me. I feel like something bad is going to happen and it makes my heart thump and feel like it’s stuck in my throat. my throat feels clogged. i can barley breath. 

i feel like there is a ticking time bomb inside me but it never explodes even tho i feels like it needs to. i don’t have the energy to do so.  i wanna slam my head on a hard surface over and over until i empty the negativity out of my head or until my toxic brain spills out. i want to tear my hair out and scream. i want to cry and hit and kick things out of frustration. i feel stuck. i want to get past this. i’m too young to suffer. i want all of this to end. 

but i am simply just too   t i r e d.",0.5172931109433279,2.8317938051341898,2.309401812066717,93.47013699178622,87.02800466744458,5.274436589104719,20.070572219552933,6.7510026930119285,0.2713014254009658,3229,100,707,41,102,1062,325,857,0.231,0.609,0.16,-0.9977,0,1,3,0,1,0,108.0,0,0,5,5,22,55,7,6,33,0,41,45,28,12,8,146,136,55,0,23,22,0,40,15,3,0,13,4,3,2,32,41,2,4,33,2,1,12,19,28,0,2,7,55,121,27,110,124,17,103,0,8,5,2,20,55,0,6,48,432,153,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035955911960420146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02655809240893826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05713758262130516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523474858776122,0.0,0.11594759304487302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712459901340114,0.0,0.03875519018888662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03639967873492898,0.18758147480717174,0.07787520390578333,0.0,0.0,0.07626907664861365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029001251931504025,0.0,0.09224576932334334,0.0,0.0,0.06878993067794323,0.0,0.058500440149115526,0.06634636919682703,0.06240205590179996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5441662013754791,0.32241995726506345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02952990936307369,0.0,0.0,0.0268219473592776,0.0,0.10882789635036412,0.033303311625395814,0.039460470461458834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030699761355188232,0.03695645015593303,0.12439696407738332,0.0,0.14251692728320065,0.0,0.0,0.08227864047082982,0.0,0.036679977997402746,0.034823565250915456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149446641526337,0.0,0.07499973813031957,0.0,0.0,0.03085769577114725,0.0,0.07230396163885702,0.019079327132349985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04904270118280759,0.25441154654139525,0.0,0.030655380485447494,0.0,0.029153187703005037,0.0,0.03789725341344145,0.0,0.031333073279236665,0.0,0.06952076995623012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07010770828375051,0.0,0.0,0.11069470671026772,0.025520684427493542,0.15445144677302566,0.026775570468229336,0.06705898801767894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394405973867939,0.023524856386266568,0.052807054379366704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942272559130146,0.07220432618814815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0328183941025291,0.0,0.0,0.03531924765946522,0.0,0.033219083151971265,0.0,0.034899756588446594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034278439327973295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03302342223784102,0.0,0.0,0.07027007465504817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422497034412884,0.035389186321482136,0.0,0.08017956941612425,0.0,0.0,0.02457257746261456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0362933122942019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051275648343202,0.055807751769702006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04030863082502642,0.09225662551473016,0.022244985796184013,0.0,0.0,0.060730559478917284,0.27931125111699107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04714056455267313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993593111228262,0.0,0.0,0.3071511185596993,0.027556409152910057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03132631803391677,0.03875982721664559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03525637712772347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-aesii-,2020/01/22,"imagined relationships (not serious) I have these stuffed animals. About half a year ago I started pretending that people from my school could see me through my plushies. For fun, nothing too serious. But as time went on, I started to half believe it. Like somehow, just using the power of my mind, that I could make people hear me. 

It's gotten a bit worse. Now, I half expect it to effect my real relationships with these people, even if I don't know them. Let's say I add a complete stranger to my ""library"" of people. I come up with a personality for them based off of what I see of their behavior in school. Then, maybe a month later, I start hoping that they will approach me about it, and go home disappointed when they don't. And then I manage to convince myself that maybe they're too embarrassed, or think that they're hallucinating, and that they really can see me.

It's creepy but not of too much concern, I don't think. It's unsettling that these imagined relationships are able to affect my emotions, but it's not getting in the way of my life or anything. I just wanted to know if this is normal or i'm just very lonely.",4.5293721719457,5.8425910859728525,5.2810378959276,81.80173783936651,70.26696832579185,8.058936651583709,28.29213800904977,8.472884824447931,1.9636807692307696,894,32,174,14,16,290,121,221,0.047,0.905,0.048,-0.4457,1,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,6,2,12,9,0,1,7,0,11,1,0,4,0,41,32,15,0,8,14,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,1,1,19,7,0,0,7,1,0,4,6,5,0,3,2,5,31,4,26,26,2,22,0,2,3,0,12,5,0,8,13,124,50,3,0.12072481168087865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701526143677853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934623359276357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360155216360861,0.0,0.0,0.1318002269034266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399373555770856,0.12657766816174068,0.0,0.0,0.19277787731969764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579916402556969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973759953240453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307373137040949,0.0,0.06861069258262027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360656367764092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109682941540115,0.11990697790992498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326943985464603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12344929929993638,0.0852715047470451,0.0589800449414961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058474924051255,0.0,0.24256859970202185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218976450224157,0.0,0.09636139290179037,0.0,0.08874662736031105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828468314271395,0.1158387127739794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33478153499251684,0.10541224898668126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13741126571768575,0.0773394056982477,0.0,0.0,0.3888398032371975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600521578777013,0.0,0.2443599092222809,0.28860613384680345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25634892922476465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15471116934172624,0.0,0.0,0.07039560853433859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426747581725272,0.0,0.09961061296180912,0.07120662180139788,0.09582573623483956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119131099183066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302889691201978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777428206040572
mentalhealth,BlabbermouthGaming,2020/01/22,"How Am I Doing? I have been going thorugh a lot lately and don't know what to say... hope i can explain in a video  
[https://youtu.be/t5sSUoaY2jQ](https://youtu.be/t5sSUoaY2jQ)",7.065000000000001,11.175100592592594,3.649907407407409,80.91708333333334,80.1111111111111,4.181481481481482,17.86111111111111,5.985473137389443,-0.13195555555555538,144,3,21,1,4,38,24,27,0.0,0.873,0.127,0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,1,0,6,10,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,2,9,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,1,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760285004703965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4823992013862504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669222133816404,0.0,0.5478788414797785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129157919746325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862397354366273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KillerAshHerself,2020/01/22,"Do i possibly have ADHD ? Hello,it’s something i actually never believed to have or even thought about it!

It’s becoming worse and worse,because i don’t know why but i am unable to keep my concentration when studying as a result i failed 3 times in a row my first year of university! I don’t even know if i hate studying as i can’t even stay put to do it at least 30 minutes! For listening music,watching movies,playing video games or even reading some books i don’t have any problems doing that!

I once heard some people who never weren’t able to concentrate have ADHD which is why i am asking. I have to wait 6 months to get specialt so there’s that too (last one i saw wasn’t being very helpful)",2.723125000000003,4.395515062500003,4.249722222222221,85.96750000000002,75.45833333333334,6.7444444444444445,25.88888888888889,7.492282038375204,1.307372222222222,555,20,113,7,12,185,93,144,0.129,0.871,0.0,-0.9536,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,9,3,1,0,2,0,18,0,0,1,2,16,29,9,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,7,1,0,2,3,4,0,1,8,3,0,2,5,3,15,0,13,23,3,12,0,1,1,0,6,2,0,5,8,75,22,3,0.1554778142188727,0.0,0.1517239187332859,0.0,0.3737082375454961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573024523026084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453507683324957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477783245492703,0.1717130305332611,0.0,0.1751702546425918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4107665197815061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224934934869492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123074081922839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350215286983748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421350153924433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381958250517782,0.0,0.0,0.17089308119715474,0.12673516993581466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241009079646329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398281504576133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16557879789617308,0.10535579071216672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077887398968704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752778745609205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14877127046999905,0.0,0.15629814655040575,0.0,0.0,0.1555198887234843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196944173444317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571866297588106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234320174494082,0.0906603637904861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828547968451448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805890886110433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15844517553030515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012261481657987
mentalhealth,mckbrown1,2020/01/22,"Has anyone been diagnosed with ADHD, especially as an adult? Did you know you were different/had a problem before you were diagnosed? My psychiatrist thinks I may have ADHD, in addition to anxiety and depression which I am already diagnosed with, but decided to monitor me for longer before prescribing medication for it.

I'm not hyperactive physically besides figitting and tow tapping type stuff, but can be very impulsive. For example, I'm very shy around people I don't know until they start a conversation, and then I suddenly become loud and overly excitable. I can't seem to stop myself from interrupting them or going on tangents that they probably don't care about.

I always just thought this was my personality. How do you tell the difference between what's normal and what's a disease that should be treated?

People with ADHD, does medication help you? How so?",6.146843156843157,8.73361072727273,7.1897402597402635,64.61504995004998,68.35064935064935,10.972227772227773,34.57342657342657,10.891193690592663,4.839443156843157,708,35,105,24,13,237,108,154,0.10300000000000001,0.838,0.06,-0.6767,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,5,3,0,6,5,0,0,5,0,17,5,0,2,0,28,27,14,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,2,8,10,0,1,6,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,6,1,18,3,18,17,0,10,0,1,0,0,13,4,0,3,5,80,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4932356088413498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150966658691262,0.0,0.11383191944541625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465471525196804,0.0,0.0,0.0956565647987444,0.0,0.0,0.12178459869473217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15108931273469786,0.2328203218929327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394808350932795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782911817900983,0.4165596591147975,0.0,0.1429311033166724,0.0,0.0,0.11971813628186499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777488879145324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169686351899113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15036784400699066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27563135320260057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403891180073013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896853905726471,0.11945200992418355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147497892119087,0.13090298936647107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245412589458689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683060280682496,0.0,0.0,0.11437430213701945,0.0,0.0,0.15660789437504294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957275981510285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765850417404966,0.0,0.10860712566758833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257553186171261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ac112322,2020/01/22,"Bipolar Does anyone’s significant other suffer from bipolar disorder? I have almost 10 years of history with my spouse. He’s always been one to use Adderall to be productive, has a gambling and porn addiction, has major anger issues, used to see a psychiatrist that prescribed him medications, including Viagra. I was told that was to see if it would help him “last longer.” He’s always been a secretive person and I feel like he’s living a double life. NOT with another woman, but one without the responsibility of having to be a mature adult, decent human being and father to his children. 

He is big on threatening me with divorce, acting out of anger, and turning the tables around to make him the victim. I feel like he’s a bit of a narcissist. 

There is a LOT more to our story, and I probably should’ve given some more history, but I’m at the point where I’m beginning to wonder why I’m still letting him continue to treat me this way and make me out to be the monster. 

We don’t talk to each other because he’s too buried into his phone and work and hobbies. One day he wants us to work and is as sweet as can be and the next he’s in my face telling me to get out of his house. 

I guess, all of this to say, is anyone else in my shoes or been in my shoes and can give me a little guidance? How can I get him to see someone about being bipolar? I can’t diagnose him, but the symptoms are there. 

I’m a Christian and do a lot of praying; not just for him, but myself, our kids and our situation. My spouse is very good at letting Satan win, but I can see when Satan tries to make an appearance. I can see when it’s him telling me that I’m not good enough and that I should be the one to file for a divorce. 

I want to protect myself and my kids. I don’t want a divorce, but I’ve been praying for God to show me that it’s okay in this situation. Yesterday I found out some stuff that I feel like was Him saying, “Even though I created this beautiful relationship between the two of you, I don’t want you to be abused any longer. Here is what your gut has been telling you for so long. He doesn’t want to change, but I will continue working on him. You don’t deserve to be abused every day of your life. He uses words and the silent treatment to beat you down.”

Help.",4.5146115139855,4.716502549356225,5.692776380050319,82.86877682403436,69.64377682403433,8.745182773420158,28.300725173893753,8.641336200584522,1.8878898327660207,1772,57,375,27,29,593,209,466,0.057999999999999996,0.7959999999999999,0.146,0.9903,0,0,0,0,5,0,46.0,5,7,0,5,15,13,3,0,24,1,46,15,4,7,1,70,81,32,0,8,14,3,3,3,0,3,10,2,0,7,17,27,0,1,6,1,1,2,10,4,0,5,11,11,58,9,61,56,12,35,5,1,5,1,61,19,0,10,16,262,75,3,0.0,0.19846666244387004,0.0,0.0913028762688134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386629612827087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937801961904853,0.0,0.0,0.0569547522336248,0.08782207668522493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712376133307005,0.08581460522996262,0.0,0.07455771750520122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051054908204879575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143632765050004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859932019468374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802720951813427,0.0,0.0,0.08500729353633615,0.0,0.0,0.09598792473804303,0.0,0.0732926090886611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699646882729725,0.0,0.0,0.08653899481426958,0.0,0.05531791141946618,0.0,0.07056531677548669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12704374348360226,0.1794989762429787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183058394563072,0.0,0.0,0.08751472593366899,0.08034328386345772,0.0,0.1404956913893389,0.0,0.0,0.09226311306459274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227542595100996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663944599762117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741612705293801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826968184232263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17128575335889898,0.11831410962615385,0.122752111452662,0.08394227321348344,0.07395522595435998,0.07411856151684264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424072116239143,0.0,0.0,0.16771686305034705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437209954260312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890720157771575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22701216452571665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312968394041278,0.0,0.0,0.07917343425125471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029964618755376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991912605836846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320712070336022,0.0,0.0,0.3337005511593484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882832340222496,0.0,0.0,0.07096344603255897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688506635083909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587687830024362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705119124019724,0.0,0.06731730004284918,0.21961082459921932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228666641829283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002935614405418,0.0,0.0568626297880077,0.09109895815438844,0.08181428169383853,0.0,0.10074426414022054,0.21700649474076986,0.0,0.06910480245923104,0.24699775390707546,0.06647904652045318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557384354163359,0.0,0.0,0.0807346767766299,0.09082630103488466,0.1829190313247858,0.0,0.0,0.05949556130200734,0.0,0.0,0.05393403474513903
mentalhealth,Amberlights88,2020/01/22,"Survey on People's Attitudes Towards Therapy Delivered Via the Internet (Everyone 18+) Hi, I'm doing a research project that aims to understand people's attitudes and preferences towards therapy delivered via the internet. The survey will ask you about your eating patterns, body image concerns, technology use, and attitudes and preferences towards online-delivered therapy. If you have some time, I'd really appreciate it if you can fill out the survey below. 

Only non-identified group data will be reported (no individual responses will be identified). Data will be stored on a password protected file. Results may be presented at conferences or published in peer-reviewed journals. This project was developed by researchers in the psychology faculty at my local university. 

You only need to be 18+ and everyone is welcome! The survey will take 10-15 minutes to complete. Thank you 🧡

Survey: https://researchsurveys.deakin.edu.au/jfe/form/SV_cNLKpq6wXY0I9jT",7.824779411764705,11.65726832026144,8.191662581699347,53.364356617647076,68.41176470588235,12.452450980392154,41.58864379084967,11.333407214811013,7.170385947712417,795,49,88,33,16,260,101,153,0.0,0.919,0.081,0.893,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,6,0,0,1,2,0,0,8,0,16,2,1,2,0,16,23,7,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,1,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,7,2,16,11,1,15,0,0,0,0,10,12,0,5,2,59,10,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752528080712462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20822938048109402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19655162294894016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918216776379296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3582582867659304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900160470793266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851484574081562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599267903720391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009374108925006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14094901380402766,0.0,0.0,0.17259094949761353,0.6431416001323013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931131302104907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951558266572343,0.0,0.16190803551921398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Neither-Stuff,2020/01/22,"I hate my parents for making me a half breed. I'm 15M and look like a slug they dug out of the toilet. I'm disgusting and ugly, and nobody will ever want to get with me except middle aged adults with a fetish for that kind of thing. Everyone hates me because I'm gay and ugly, and I should never have been born. My parents are a black guy and a Chinese woman. My siblings are adopted and don't have to deal with a mix of two kinds of ugly. My grandparents call me a Chinese word that basically means a mutt and my adopted brother who is fully Chinese is their favorite. I know people who don't understand my life are going to come in here and call me racist, but I'm not. I can think I'm ugly without thinking that my kind deserves less human rights as a whole. I'm going to kill myself and I don't know if I'm being too mean by writing in my note that I hate my parents for bringing me into the world.",4.689928977272724,4.216666203125001,5.967272727272725,83.36863636363638,69.26041666666666,8.023484848484847,28.91287878787879,6.980632752743323,1.4787645833333336,709,22,150,5,11,240,107,192,0.166,0.8079999999999999,0.026000000000000002,-0.981,4,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,2,0,3,9,5,0,11,0,15,2,0,1,2,35,40,13,1,3,5,4,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,4,7,16,0,0,7,0,0,4,6,5,0,2,1,2,24,4,22,36,2,15,0,0,2,1,16,7,0,1,5,100,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08020275826622653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686917006196371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333436112256312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356410450391156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901097632269254,0.0,0.12571906072705213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873895826652654,0.0,0.14954648889812774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13027321078655346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896890994786066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556072841236475,0.411024126299136,0.14461289233581232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293051606077826,0.06427758053479245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048415820157707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782280031019095,0.0,0.0,0.28663269754081644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101473512731659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4382727739422044,0.0,0.0,0.09121282926449173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235853053331292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740807105171593,0.16860719005655045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285230213534838,0.13696714425918538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760233773965243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14689120536991054,0.0,0.12682705723872242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,katiekatiexo,2020/01/22,"What is even going on? Idk if anyone can suggest anything etc etc
Its a long read, sorry guys.

So
I have had issues since a young age but ill summarise. 

Sexually abused as a child, by someone of the same age and gender as me but obviously more to it like i reckon she was getting abused etc etc else how would she have known certain things to do etc.
From about 10 onwards been under Camhs who diagnosed me with panic attacks and anxiety.
I.rarely attended school, had to sit at the back of the class else i was TERRRRIBLY anxious, shaky and fidgety etc and just walked out crying. 
Everyone put  it down to anxiety and panic attacks.
Then
Last January my doctor finally felt i should see  a psychiatrist- who diagnosed me with Bipolar and Panic attacks/anxiety.
I get months where im on a high, rarely panic attacks, not anxious, just living life,sexually active, shopping etc...then months of sadness anxiety cant even do things like walk down the road..i look a mess, just have 0 energy and go into a bit of a slump. 
Im on carbamazepine and sertraline.

I have so many worries and doubts like is it bipolar? Is it something more? Because im fine recently like my moods been good just randomly hormonal etc though, not even due on a period but just up and down a bit. Then today i go into a shop, come over all faint..dizzy...sweaty...light headed cant even speak properly and just need to get out asap. 
My eyes get all wide and just vacant and i feel like a zombie.
Is this normal with bipolar? Like why are my physical effects so bad!? Doctors just put it down to stress but i just wondered if anyone else has experienced the same thing as i am going out of my mind here.
I also have been suffering with severe pains in my stomach, nausea and just headaches CONSTANTLY. For months now, easily 6 months.

Anyone have any suggestions or advice?",4.467405308991712,6.10516552124646,5.286792571608436,80.44526807260522,70.84135977337111,8.515748609799601,28.371524499003247,9.049649993220411,2.4021183296611057,1451,54,268,29,27,472,192,353,0.23199999999999998,0.6709999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.9952,0,0,1,0,2,0,52.0,0,0,0,1,25,25,3,7,17,0,27,12,3,2,4,64,42,32,0,6,19,0,2,6,0,2,9,1,0,2,13,24,0,0,6,3,2,10,4,15,0,0,8,7,22,9,40,32,15,51,0,2,3,0,9,21,0,7,25,181,35,5,0.0,0.14950554791866888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061652005879809776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05045402247312717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0429041902272545,0.0,0.19305842956474809,0.14255023128446806,0.0,0.13234453507284907,0.06464440635191472,0.05191869487528928,0.0,0.0,0.21532609831468505,0.0,0.048513250554262886,0.052678529862902584,0.03845981955416121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775853432235885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054347495925154775,0.0,0.0681791907040806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693027380101817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280725119346168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291530655298038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811384531396447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5629070641255149,0.16668461200777598,0.0,0.0,0.06028636040211025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03190081438240968,0.045072377166679715,0.060577461182359876,0.06911334302380744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185022502573396,0.0,0.143424767484645,0.052917918462290575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06247022281903102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474978921685492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665933343037105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044480186809336,0.06585083767241602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05142776154134341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04456319154147677,0.18493908704787185,0.0,0.0557106994273287,0.055833740609474256,0.05298073133496455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06396459025329274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370414266410716,0.0,0.20143522607344572,0.0,0.0,0.046781337082478364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181599594082818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713350186213984,0.29609579187144863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268481955595927,0.0,0.0,0.06310828916912521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229496421175368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385167865885308,0.05027553053747755,0.0,0.0,0.07127511564223403,0.0,0.052189705668218345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05345698240023136,0.04857070027315228,0.0,0.07062545072311918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227077452461045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257450010285461,0.0,0.06198679918218969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05980309550679923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056930009039715485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841973223330035,0.0,0.06407219215535621,0.0,0.044818189521885085,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lukacla,2020/01/22,"help help. i just broke down crying in front of my parents. they are letting me stay home from school, but they want to talk to me about it. ive been struggling with my mental health for a couple years now, but i dont know if its an actual condition or if im being dramatic. i dont want to tell them because they might not believe me or i might be faking everything.

what do i do? my mom knows im not telling her something. how do i say it? i dont even know if its real so how can i even ask for help?",-0.4260810810810796,1.4476205585585618,1.9436261261261296,97.60300675675678,86.65765765765768,5.141441441441441,18.25900900900901,6.42735559955562,-0.2612828828828828,386,10,95,4,12,131,70,111,0.109,0.7979999999999999,0.09300000000000001,-0.5775,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,4,0,8,3,0,1,2,0,15,1,0,2,0,21,21,10,0,5,10,2,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,5,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,1,1,20,0,11,15,0,6,0,1,0,0,15,2,0,7,2,68,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.1317915891299493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262556945518451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823266447229365,0.0,0.0,0.1521577245063625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14943283053397038,0.14834863908958895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4748409625159905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784015758864885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137632283231195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355430773610175,0.0,0.0,0.27156818301266883,0.0,0.135468494971342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291759375427307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22266368015986496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810015391949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610098046400754,0.2865383525448389,0.0,0.1581716525468936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995962621096742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537191142719926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739903063485218,0.0,0.13668016451579398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396987899802568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14394781076327698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14118601465974787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854994434805944,0.2360833720633749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15931472250754244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869692704003961
mentalhealth,SkeliciousFish,2020/01/22,"Just got diagnosed with schizophrenia. Yesterday I got diagnosed with schizophrenia, after 3 months of check ups and all that. I really don't know how to feel about it, but it's kinda hard to like, accept it? I'm still processing yesterday, and i'm just kind of sad? I should be happy to know, that I will get antipsychotics for it, so why am I sad?",4.173478260869565,5.404163739130438,5.012289855072464,83.70626086956524,71.02898550724638,9.577971014492757,25.394202898550724,9.888512548439397,2.245258550724638,274,8,56,7,5,89,46,69,0.138,0.705,0.158,0.3622,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,15,13,5,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,5,4,11,8,1,6,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,6,36,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5391813374597177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430144771067587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387713483554403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4248684868280587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827489967494326,0.2379362509328335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765941064162814,0.29194690412981233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129764645039467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21200902708386868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17015789896313818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21211814910747787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23967358765710975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dinosaurranch,2020/01/22,Where do you feel emotions? I'm not sure how to explain it really but when I'm irritated/annoyed I get a feeling in my lower back or when I'm angry I get the same feeling but in my stomach. Its feels like a tingle? I'd like to know if there's a name for that.,-1.6167372881355924,0.3183767118644063,1.8862500000000004,94.67479872881357,95.4406779661017,4.3059322033898315,19.239406779661017,5.985473137389443,-0.1074932203389829,202,7,48,2,8,73,42,59,0.145,0.682,0.172,0.1603,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,0,1,2,1,1,1,15,12,7,0,1,5,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,5,3,5,12,1,6,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,5,30,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418949827527649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35386364125007025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6362506619671626,0.22473822662460352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32871336742189866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288664249176516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307378820979499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015299866451704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964908450228909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,punkalchemy101,2020/01/22,"My mum told She’s ashamed of me ... My whole life’s been a emotional rollercoaster ever since my father has been stabbed on the heart and died on the spot when I was 11 years old. I was never the kid my mum always wanted me to be. I’ve always been rather rebel, always seeking exciting things to do, never stay in one place and never settle down. I moved countries back and forth. Never really found my place, but I got used to it and I accepted the reality and maybe one day I’ll find my place on this planet. Been hurt and broken by people in ways you can’t imagine and I still have the heart to forgive and be kind to others. Always been miss understood by close friends and family and I’ve always been a huge disappointment to my mother and my older brother! I stopped trying explaining myself to them as it was simply impossible to make them understand me! But I still listened to them on occasions and asked for advice from a different perspective of life.... some were helpful, some were meh that’s not helping me.... I do not judge anyone, I’m respectful to everyone and i always try to understand everyone’s perspective or life choices and if I don’t agree with them I don’t rub it in their face saying that they’re wrong in a very selfish way, rather explain why I think they’re perspective and life choices would never quite suit me and simply accept them for who they are! 

I had 3 long relationships along the years and 7 months after my last long relationship (4years) I met a guy who I fell for and it didn’t worked out so he ended it with me ( because he couldn’t commit ). So I’ve been through this breakup since 2 weeks ago and I’m quite hurt. I spoke to friends, my mum, as I needed to get it off of my chest.... Today my mum called me, shouting at me that she’s very disappointed in me, I’m a disgrace to her and I always did what I wanted and never cared about her feelings.... and all this because I decided to move from living alone in a very depressing studio flat to a house shared with other people..... It was a video call and I could see the way she was looking at me, like she was about to vomit.... This is just the tip of the fucking iceberg.... I so tired of this shit! And if I stop giving a shit about my family I’ll be the bad daughter! The villain! 

If people would learn to accept each other exactly the way we’ve been designed to me there won’t be wars! 

I’m so done giving a shit and drive me depression and anxiety and panic attacks off the fucking charts!",3.8928644444444416,5.012090442000002,4.907066666666669,84.6189777777778,71.58,7.955555555555558,25.68888888888889,8.344100000000001,1.5423022222222218,1951,59,397,30,36,639,235,500,0.203,0.695,0.102,-0.9961,1,1,0,0,0,0,63.0,0,1,7,3,16,33,9,2,24,0,38,15,7,2,10,84,70,40,2,12,11,8,2,1,2,3,6,4,1,2,22,34,0,2,16,1,0,4,14,21,0,2,26,8,64,12,58,35,5,57,0,7,2,2,48,21,5,6,28,267,86,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587605339555369,0.05975832809909948,0.0,0.0,0.06982043820196956,0.0,0.0,0.3926561808757975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05157142591298088,0.0,0.0,0.04713734524747975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06302286810332752,0.07669300913305609,0.0,0.05183710470239703,0.05628776544291325,0.08218973869147049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376741968723179,0.0,0.06873293320778967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053824489556212336,0.0,0.0,0.043476369040928005,0.0,0.11612693463319901,0.0,0.06996495362362057,0.07043314567919358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898779444903723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583152991891348,0.05970867918766198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06097970479338163,0.0,0.1288336831932211,0.0,0.0,0.12710359362171747,0.0,0.034086478154727505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06161505573481395,0.0,0.0,0.07391582870043413,0.10416757723271718,0.12464607276161288,0.0352209645901217,0.12933905355099842,0.0,0.0,0.0539170300907543,0.0,0.0,0.0667503299419221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977152070734235,0.09037219186993953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778655464386701,0.14433588391579213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020117151972809,0.0,0.05495130153455105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19046563975132536,0.032935011601086035,0.0,0.059527682154137763,0.11931830684742578,0.05661067205439607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04499928160006531,0.0,0.06772629330114778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05380910774593879,0.1433005498077222,0.0,0.04998653029341223,0.3119623941549404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073951617077309,0.0,0.09136276578580994,0.0,0.0,0.07909565113561917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402088674620156,0.0,0.21129943703758072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434058974388189,0.0,0.0,0.043187051254699765,0.0,0.0,0.1447545345580772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05361021509684138,0.0,0.0,0.05372012616480469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20759810590341946,0.11153089954608274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185421555596817,0.10767360708351502,0.11272202757051154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04478677962308453,0.043196085745116165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774823264081056,0.06390046611793157,0.06441684159661057,0.0,0.09153918492677864,0.0,0.0,0.14036043197681206,0.0,0.058223938775623235,0.0,0.16687050832579053,0.07952489413765093,0.21403996810837256,0.0540753400492164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060830531980109265,0.07526517819594747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049078100143837455,0.0,0.0,0.09577775788160152,0.07370648387097109,0.0,0.08682464386168456
mentalhealth,ilaria903,2020/01/22,"Is there anything like the opposite of ""compulsive shopping""? I would really appreciate if someone helped me figure out what is with me. I get pleasure by not buying things. I love going in a shop, looking at things I would like to buy. Even picking them up... And then walking out of the store without buying them. I even have that in online shops or in videogames! I would really like to figure this out. Thank you so much.",2.560944444444445,5.27200865,3.3641666666666663,86.7752777777778,81.25,6.055555555555558,23.88888888888889,7.3871296695380915,1.2727222222222223,332,12,61,5,9,105,56,80,0.039,0.764,0.19699999999999998,0.9121,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,2,0,4,6,0,0,3,0,6,1,0,1,0,15,11,5,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,2,3,7,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,11,6,15,8,1,11,0,0,1,1,5,8,0,2,4,50,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19332397720217556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3103326480870559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273907288214883,0.0,0.13351378798153168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15746586122111814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34431874620610564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19727856644621028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21202977327397746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17269754820201313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30099906082653793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19905193055532955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21628818136048675,0.0,0.0,0.3121486235420286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22646015904829936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5006538013051364,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,katiah_,2020/01/22,"I think my therapist is ditching me I’ve been with her for the past 3-4 months and found out what I need to work on the most: being able to feel and express things when other people are present. I can only feel things when i’m alone. She thought that group therapy would be a good idea. But the offered days don’t work for me. Today, when she learned that I can’t make it to the group sessions she seemed a bit puzzled and didn’t know what to do. She kept asking what I was trying to get out of the therapy and told me that she’d be able to do very little 1 on 1 with me. She said she needs time to think about if and how we’re going to proceed. 
Is this normal that the therapist just runs out of ideas and doesn’t know what to do with you anymore? I mean, doesn’t she wanna get paid at least? :D",4.126994219653176,3.595234560693648,4.7304104046242825,91.96104913294799,70.44508670520231,7.84485549132948,25.39248554913295,6.742157984588678,0.6603923699421972,621,14,151,4,10,199,101,173,0.023,0.9309999999999999,0.046,0.6801,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,2,6,1,0,0,8,0,19,0,0,2,0,38,41,12,0,6,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,13,12,0,1,13,0,1,2,5,0,0,0,9,3,21,1,24,27,3,19,0,0,0,0,17,7,0,4,10,99,34,4,0.28311686926669305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661184648998093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403879292701959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13233802739815406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15454514730648422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129347950140032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14315239581134634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521151699534988,0.0,0.0,0.14791687897399394,0.0,0.08045092061753711,0.11873249877601022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31960448429832866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559362720319314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187874023774838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449135433701836,0.0,0.0,0.15419863459285435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129905919780933,0.0,0.0,0.20992757120042832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869721023914472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107661568406028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513354352828064,0.09813879470560356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346544878916651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886948232721215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237688138862809,0.32872050644942297,0.18809026777763904,0.1814098580679597,0.0,0.11238158486828788,0.08254386161748033,0.0,0.13418084403910452,0.1352651506456067,0.0,0.09610888497634967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680053377109738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20611245273179146,0.0,0.0,0.10055905045362354,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kiwiscantfly222,2020/01/22,"The last decade 9 and a half years ago Mum took me to the South Island Eating Disorder Unit and told me she couldn’t go through this all again. Tomorrow, 9 and a half years later I am walking through those doors again but this time alone. I have gone from being diagnosed with Anorexia 9 and a half years ago to tomorrow probably being diagnosed with binge eating disorder. What the fuck have I don’t to myself in the last decade. I am so revolted it has come to this. No one knows. I don’t know how I’ll survive tomorrow.",4.640857142857144,5.410123180952382,5.206666666666667,84.45000000000002,69.57142857142857,9.428571428571429,28.333333333333336,9.606745405546679,2.3426190476190483,414,14,86,9,7,133,63,105,0.158,0.8420000000000001,0.0,-0.9423,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,0,7,0,10,5,0,1,1,13,18,7,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,6,7,2,0,2,0,0,5,4,1,0,4,3,0,9,0,10,12,1,21,0,0,0,1,3,2,1,0,14,57,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163553940057257,0.0,0.0,0.18481166508212069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15371162367304916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3622289016676504,0.0,0.0,0.4090190277185597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3651805753114928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496636834607425,0.0,0.0,0.10141246394937536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19613365500825305,0.2909074132606516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091663491526924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19239020735034687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405072218278882,0.0,0.0,0.17050857974227068,0.1982551647090628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3447315875293534
mentalhealth,RazorBoltz619,2020/01/22,What do i do when i know dark times are ahead and i cant change it anymore? I failed multiple exams. My parents dont know but they will know sooner or later. I cant do anything about and when they know the entire dynamic of the family will change and trust me when i say i know it will be very dark. So basically im just anxious the whole time until they find out while also dealing with the rest of my exams. What do i do?,1.3894780219780216,2.985266780219781,3.3693269230769265,91.16629807692308,79.0,6.308241758241758,20.166208791208803,7.1686216300943375,0.3226142857142857,331,8,75,4,8,112,53,91,0.053,0.8540000000000001,0.09300000000000001,0.6767,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,3,2,7,3,0,0,4,0,13,0,0,0,0,14,18,12,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,6,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,14,2,7,14,2,10,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,1,9,56,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565824849981016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22120009820292,0.1941825938545825,0.0,0.0,0.16112805011257456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4142643037794076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018628728901416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294780407157816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18458434170364105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895913369203925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114993496309743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5380372492603834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21741452776331344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15570930734959576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283469987623627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615568427369525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21860551656554286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadthrowaway10929,2020/01/22,"I was raped, and now I have an STD to show for it. Already had very bad self image/self esteem issues, pre-existing behavioral issues from trauma (paranoia, social anxiety, etc.), and worsening anxiety and depression. This all has made it very hard for me to interact with others, make friends, start relationships, etc. I'm extremely lonely. So after a while i turned to online dating bc I had no luck starting any sort of friendship/relationships in person.

A couple of months ago, I was raped when meeting my very first tinder date. It was a horrible experience. I remember going home and scrubbing my vagina mercilessly while crying. Wasn't a catfish (not entirely anyways), he looked like his picture and was still relatively attractive.. but he had extremely bad hygiene. To spare details, it wasn't ""oh i'm definitely about to catch something"" gross, it was ""This is probably gonna give me the worst yeast infection I've ever had"" gross. In fact I don't even remember seeing anything that was really reminiscent of an STD/STI (I know people don't need to have symptoms to have something, but i'm just trying to convey how this possible dilemma just didn't occur to me). I lied about how it went to people who knew about the date, just said it was really bad consensual sex. I just already felt really disgusted with myself and worthless, I was scared for anyone to know. found out later. he had allegedly raped other girls. I stopped talking about it all together after that out of fear that people would either look down upon me for having consensual sex with a rapist or put 2 and 2 together and realize he had actually raped me. just tried to repress it to the best of my ability and hoped it would never come up/i could move on.

Until recently, anyways. I just found out he gave me HPV. admittedly, it's one of the better possible outcomes i could have had in the regard of STD/STIs, but god have I hit a fucking mental low. I already felt unlovable and cast out by others, hell i was even so desperate to fill the void of crippling unwanted-ness that i kept using tinder after the incident anyway (no hook ups or anything occurred, met up with one other dude that i actually had a really nice date but i don't think he felt the same way. i've since given up and deleted the app) but now I feel absolutely fucking disgusting and filthy. I can't look at myself anymore. Not only that but just thinking about my situation/feeling the discomfort of my warts consistently puts my into a PTSD like flashback of getting raped. I thought my already declining mental health was torture but this is really just making me feel extremely stressed and suicidal. I keep thinking about my love life and respect is perpetually gone, I don't know if i'd ever really be comfortable having physical contact with anyone in anyway, and dealing with the possibility of reoccurring warts/cervical cancer.",6.120724586526822,7.5081629794776115,7.055252117789433,70.28196248487293,66.59328358208955,10.2722065348931,32.95663574021783,10.403877232588213,3.7904800927793456,2311,99,380,60,37,772,269,536,0.25,0.675,0.075,-0.9989,0,2,2,0,0,0,72.0,0,0,0,3,30,41,12,5,21,0,42,19,1,6,6,92,91,33,1,7,21,0,6,2,1,3,7,1,1,3,26,27,0,4,19,1,0,9,13,29,0,3,36,11,43,12,63,48,8,52,1,4,4,13,25,17,3,6,27,262,69,0,0.0,0.0,0.1381950421392743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276622690518519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125496072736562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481512599232193,0.0,0.1083344840340968,0.0,0.07022162237101083,0.09901994923970947,0.0,0.11653642959219852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17736292681667118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430768893165975,0.06262313087175711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06099405183053349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306742447474545,0.07834671563247815,0.07777828071439095,0.0,0.0729990167987673,0.060986056344344224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793727963257273,0.0935348509723054,0.12809816169305704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926293614705786,0.0,0.07967767940688951,0.10740660040104964,0.0,0.20395777639179974,0.0,0.0,0.06022848789669767,0.0,0.15527267323819793,0.0547053941829629,0.13092005641157678,0.03699379024823129,0.0679246277558274,0.04024130989304517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342925873224531,0.0,0.0,0.07526464221970858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102530022856507,0.0703274325733025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780844407649502,0.0,0.06293660889445661,0.0,0.0,0.11674120050346146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050013152737672976,0.06918555043409337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17838040657004905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06390617734589682,0.06699939541315128,0.0945285856992571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427138169786732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05651755619310987,0.07525674756122258,0.0,0.052502571648193504,0.054610804999269714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09596145458567228,0.05385199453956087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726619484142706,0.06182603349890097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394731179822354,0.0,0.0,0.07634203580969409,0.0,0.08276971736799016,0.14236139647034549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27216507000561785,0.0,0.06991347459955878,0.15204066530374802,0.1604212953692779,0.0,0.06735377214013638,0.0,0.07089026515820344,0.0,0.056424095778645426,0.0,0.14773450730423734,0.0,0.0,0.05857236949668222,0.0,0.0,0.07217892726425593,0.0,0.10902153850789477,0.0,0.0,0.10023526764686966,0.0,0.056546646039830416,0.05919791085830167,0.08110930029338488,0.0,0.0,0.07745148112619865,0.0,0.0,0.07359569433010311,0.0,0.056912069398467414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361110027106659,0.0,0.056212932658107034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614675367593624,0.07701779817833583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061154605035870314,0.0,0.17526983305140356,0.0,0.05620338466794875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656388963264567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059867260170356,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DibsOnTheChips,2020/01/22,"Coping with feeling empty etc I just moved out of a sort of foster home facility where I've been living for two years. I still receive support, but I no longer live with housemates.

I initially moved away from my parents because it was no longer safe to live with either of them (they're divorced)

I was abused when they were still together, still abused when they split up, abused when one of them got a new partner, and abused when I moved to the other parent.
This basically included all kinds of abuse apart from sexual abuse.
This all happened over the span of approximately 10 to 12 years, and during that period I also got sexually assaulted while entering the building my therapy was. (I told my therapist, I was crying and horrified, she went out to look if he was there. He was, she knew who he was, he denied. That was the end of it. Makes me wanna scream looking back like wtf!)

This all seems to have accumulated into one big ""monster"" of sorts.
My parents are still financially responsible for me (law here), and because of that I'm required to stay in touch with them. Staying in touch would be okay on it's own as I want to stay in touch with the rest of the family. But they now have power over me and use money to force me to do things I can't. 
I'm on the spectrum and recovering from several years of a severe anxiety disorder, so my energy is limited. I can't work, so I can't get financially independent and not need their monet anymore.
I have suggested to them that they could object to supporting me financially due to me not living with them anymore, and that I would be okay with that and that I believe that would lessen the tension between us, they refused.

Currently I feel empty, unhappy and lonely for most of the day. I'm pretty much disinterested in all my hobbies etc. I feel weird and like this is simultaneously my worst episode over but also feel like I'm ""coping"" in a way, even though I feel like shit. Days pass very quickly and I think I might be dissociating or experiencing depersonalization.
I have experienced neither of these symptoms before, as far as I can recall. 
I also have increased urges to self harm, and to do it differently from the ""mild"" way I've always done it. This is also something I haven't experienced before.

I'm considering getting therapy to cope, suggesting the possibility of having CPTSD or at least something with similar symptoms. But I have lost a lot of faith in therapy after ages of waiting lists, being treated like a child, or being forced to do new experimental therapies while I just wanted to get CBT.
I live in a small town and therapy will require me to travel, which sucks because of aforementioned energy problems. 

Does anyone have any general advice regarding therapy?
Any advice to help me make myself feel better?

I could talk to foster home staff but they have turned out to be too untrained to help me in previous times of struggle, and talking about it face to face is very difficult to me. They are already offering me all kinds of unnecessary help for things I can actually do, and then fib around when I ask them for help I do need. 
So that's also pretty shit.",6.400632894200733,7.03721508710218,7.167359319118116,72.41462175743585,65.63316582914572,10.340151206482863,32.0480329575807,10.281603360665011,3.279863271311513,2505,95,454,58,37,833,280,597,0.184,0.7070000000000001,0.109,-0.9957,6,2,2,0,7,0,67.0,1,0,14,7,30,29,4,2,18,2,50,6,4,5,5,86,88,45,0,12,14,3,9,5,1,5,2,1,2,3,26,29,0,6,9,1,1,9,9,14,0,3,17,15,68,15,88,58,17,71,1,2,2,0,42,28,3,10,34,329,94,4,0.0,0.39107072431236456,0.0536823183522688,0.0,0.0,0.10751125930498748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607054611323595,0.2199594082819799,0.04577314766996005,0.0,0.0,0.07481806074218038,0.0,0.042082886407647686,0.0,0.10911128008584572,0.038464624750824614,0.0,0.0,0.04897101311424185,0.05142739710070576,0.0,0.05168418108459999,0.04229968340555863,0.0,0.10060168133794414,0.0,0.09361977753246058,0.06197800224302149,0.0,0.04865232204619103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784282535703805,0.0,0.06042645758585372,0.07095445073997142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05747427022770641,0.06304680559497605,0.0,0.04814006438176486,0.05629484672794794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04872298020312425,0.0,0.1227025107945973,0.03633392029988265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05185900910915281,0.0,0.16688978784211966,0.07859903274689775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622215650086146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799385367298199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048645608651375565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14748953000795484,0.0,0.11036004530734812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456995320367512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437677236050566,0.0,0.24287642253969416,0.0,0.09238994033423044,0.0,0.06005046544769715,0.04676796488244706,0.0,0.0,0.07343987964174717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058357453472541614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17540238570930947,0.04043905139234245,0.08157918610974928,0.0,0.10625897869118114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455308489899629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832479700879865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062016079869575025,0.0,0.11193092217395983,0.0,0.05263762477082582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05007949847903178,0.05738795495086561,0.1242924269932746,0.11293498747307175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469954995254754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17590163957777946,0.17572584413869052,0.0,0.0,0.05750892477955805,0.0,0.0,0.1248505402774129,0.0,0.11435395745683022,0.0,0.08843072168843541,0.0,0.0,0.3774558459404658,0.06387143723042749,0.07309307144707862,0.03524851092413127,0.054047542697593286,0.0,0.03207706834601856,0.0,0.0,0.05256489576657716,0.0,0.0,0.05983563370433258,0.053737270879862215,0.0,0.06617086527697437,0.04751141467049578,0.0,0.09077885699094836,0.06489324325105772,0.08732955803665249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05099529005298538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040048303433402,0.0,0.0,0.11723365508969052,0.0,0.0,0.10627488653836238
mentalhealth,needavicethrowaway00,2020/01/22,"How do I talk to my doctor about my mental health? I’ve got an appointment about 10 hours from now. I’ve been dealing with my problems alone for several years now and have tried my best to “stay in character,” (my way of saying ‘act normal’) but I’m finding it increasingly difficult to do so now. I’m a 20 year old college student studying accounting and my education and learning accounting has always been my priority, but now I can no longer do it effectively nor efficiently. I can’t focus. Information isn’t sticking. I don’t want to do anything. What I found to be so simple is a difficult task for me now. I can no longer just “push through” and ignore my problems and focus on the bigger picture. I know I need help at this point and it’s bad. I’ve known for too long that I needed to speak to a professional, but I didn’t think it would be so soon and I don’t want to have this talk with my doctor at all. It’s not because I’m uncomfortable with her; it’s because I don’t want to talk to anyone about it. Hell, I can’t even talk about my feelings out loud in the mirror without breaking down. I write about it, but it’s far too long for a quick appointment. Only three people in my life know about it, but I never go into detail because it’s just dark stuff that they aren’t equipped to handle. I know I need to see a professional for this. How should I ease my way into the topic?",3.324308943089428,4.406389073170736,4.911428571428568,84.19190476190478,72.90243902439025,7.836004645760743,26.210220673635305,8.269060116576782,1.5511816492450636,1092,36,231,17,21,369,141,287,0.129,0.799,0.07200000000000001,-0.96,1,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,2,24,8,1,0,9,0,24,4,0,3,2,50,42,18,0,11,9,0,1,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,18,13,0,1,11,0,2,4,14,7,0,1,5,5,33,1,40,33,3,35,1,0,1,0,12,13,1,0,14,161,51,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12836846778113264,0.0,0.0,0.10313122715077418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08666443437644507,0.0,0.10199524270012578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348795267983198,0.2266650946668963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300714427856036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778068559875064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537236017935281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186375590212044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06266974378075428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328244996182278,0.0,0.0,0.13589805391367105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07044015649827122,0.0,0.09912923376444968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13174653585665058,0.0,0.0,0.08307696212682476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205974343464428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20434892539820365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754521945674756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21937284586980726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490626708178774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27570842300784176,0.09559315193439977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214386749104434,0.0,0.0,0.13005823991182913,0.0,0.0,0.09426489677380782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592707211491515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716701750233655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23719508547059875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856513861301353,0.0,0.0,0.09876721576620788,0.0,0.0,0.1400212916729002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321076720809619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14188607560238567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39848554490134697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794182260100248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414975051426167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21931591394579047,0.19676174668593827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947746584938584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880461677367893,0.0,0.0,0.15963157472495734
mentalhealth,TheForsakenNinja,2020/01/22,It sounds dumb but I don’t know who to be? I was always never afraid to be myself when I was little and when I was almost done with middle school I started getting bullied. I’m not gonna lie I kind act retarded sometimes to make people laugh.Now I always think negative at work and tell myself everyone is fake and I try to be anti social by acting cool and more intimidating because everyone at work gets to have friends they want but I can’t because I don’t have the confidence,3.198571428571426,4.88332247959184,4.840561224489797,82.17676020408162,74.20408163265307,7.348979591836735,25.51530612244898,8.07648339933343,1.609220408163265,385,13,74,6,8,130,65,98,0.284,0.604,0.11199999999999999,-0.9718,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,2,2,6,1,1,1,1,13,0,0,1,1,14,22,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,6,3,0,0,4,2,13,3,9,14,1,10,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,1,4,50,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078740312842201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34546739450981995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530930797077741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124393341229313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3967273064569545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038555023573656,0.0,0.21691716120074392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21617577792427675,0.11408747990071315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208062350832328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13856969186324755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601082331905062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391859062240542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100948234237332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21161454254374407,0.0,0.0,0.2053144182442132,0.0,0.1469351313035252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18144510779105325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330169744618874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409417683758994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224435111436943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30225981270577845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,berkborkborf,2020/01/22,"I’m (almost) failing two classes because of a horrible attention span and procrastination and my grandma is making me feel like trash for it. This is tame compared to everyone else on here but I need to get this out before I have a(nother) breakdown.



I’m a sophomore in high school and, as imagined, we get a lot of work and in return, have a lot of stress. 


My grandparents don’t believe in mental illness. I know for sure I have some undiagnosed mental illness due to how badly my mental state has deteriorated over the past 2-3 years. They say “it’s all in your head” unironically and day to just get over it when I try to open up about it and ask for help. 


Recently the second semester started back up and I failed the first test of the semester. I didn’t turn in a single 15 point assignment in another class. This brought my grades down to a 58% F and a 68% D. I haven’t been able to bring up the grades because of how horrible my attention span is and my time management. In addition to this, I have a sport I play in that goes from 4-6 and I need to rest for at least a half an hour before I can actually do my homework. I try to do my work without any distractions, like my phone, but I just end up falling asleep or staring at the screen as if it’s going to do it on its own. 


My grandma isn’t the least bit sympathetic in how bad my mental state is at the moment. She tells me I have nothing to be stressed about. She tells me that I have too many problems and should just quit. She doesn’t let me have a single mental health break throughout the entire school year and only considers weekends and mental breaks. She also threatens to take away my phone or slap me whenever my grade goes down a couple points. 


She really isn’t helping and is making it worse. The only thing that’s kept me from relapsing again is painting and she wouldn’t let me do that today because of my homework. 


I really just need some comfort.",4.418558433854064,5.1515473804627225,5.4120951156812325,82.90867856436624,70.05398457583547,8.555309472018982,28.84328653351789,8.730908602173464,2.0478802847538065,1517,54,312,25,26,500,193,389,0.11599999999999999,0.804,0.08,-0.9533,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,1,1,1,6,15,13,0,3,22,0,31,5,2,5,2,53,51,27,0,7,10,0,1,2,0,2,3,1,2,0,17,19,0,1,5,3,0,4,8,8,0,4,4,4,47,5,54,42,12,56,0,2,2,0,17,30,0,8,20,219,64,17,0.08854133163468696,0.0,0.08640356743481599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886613538632829,0.0,0.0,0.07080647091915712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060211141723221874,0.09284330627989107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277419287723613,0.0,0.08318749567319574,0.06808281869683981,0.14785662708214098,0.1619219218607305,0.0,0.15068430368779998,0.0997557605679256,0.0,0.0,0.09666420214123753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796929937073827,0.0,0.057101834062764034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396492120525687,0.0,0.07842133936877428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08460503673235216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044769157643844835,0.06325394501121495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753132114571045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13877757411128244,0.0,0.05032007920378083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086895043198387,0.09411529514834502,0.0,0.0,0.1186947764471228,0.09354877812848096,0.0,0.0,0.08719537636710402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04866000031055901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18107902091044029,0.0,0.08651364448259274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15054934777565687,0.0,0.0,0.1182040528017228,0.08976701316605365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5353730228658778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969568265119428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16991559135280335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467934506677734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452271970581234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740035496465855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847220966063656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417460496142672,0.0,0.0,0.11344368855110415,0.0,0.08742388328341506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041162070473543,0.0,0.17921710922079528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06267001025076435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202847592475202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344915722207381,0.0,0.06657206228460427,0.0,0.1547780529317639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588229264462138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05162916250671354,0.0,0.08392682952351534,0.0,0.0,0.12022750434860173,0.09630754353511907,0.0864920154484147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535068409105065,0.0,0.12891828790444473,0.0,0.09023118123332886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11403542926230233
mentalhealth,onceuponacoffeee,2020/01/22,"I am 22, and still think like a child. I don't see anywhere close to my peers in thinking in terms of thinking like an adult and making decisions. I understand that all of us are in that stage where everything looks hazy and a little scary. But my real problem is that I think like a child, I dread mistakes. I want someone to give me the answers and teach me what to do next 
eg.

- teach me how to make jokes
- teach me how to have fun
- teach me all things about life

When I look back on the past years. I observe, that I never loved myself for who I was and was always trying to be better than everyone and never had any real fun after all. But now I have accepted my brusies. But at the same time, I don't see how should I be able to chance my thinking from that of a child who wants to be spoonfed to a good reliable responsible adult that can make good decesions.

Some shortcomings I have observed in myself are -

- Don't have good memory
- Doesn't observe a lot of things
- Doesn't think on my own, want someone else to tell me the answer like a school/ college kid
- Is not creative
- Don't hold strong opinions based on observations, more based on what I hear from others and less of my own thinking. Accept easily what others say. Make ideas out of intuition on think grounds.
- Has trust issues
- Has been a sad sad person for the past 22 years. Now I am neutral. Trying to be happy.
- I have overthink about everything. Worry a lot on the worst thing that will happen. Have changed to not caring about everything.
- Am an extreme person. Where I extremely care about something or don't care at all.
- Constantly compares to everyone. 
- Think I am extremely judgemental person.

I think all of this was started from me not loving myself. Now that I have accepted who I am. And am trying to chance myself actively, but at the same time I don't see how do I go about changing my kid like thinking... or become more responsible/ creative...

I am trying my best to improve for whom I love.

Thank you very much for the advice.",3.7648387096774196,5.3906668020304584,4.4012919600458495,86.14482970361881,72.60406091370558,7.418896348452598,25.90764696250205,8.049812674583475,1.5019616178156214,1576,52,312,23,31,502,172,394,0.064,0.769,0.16699999999999998,0.9873,0,0,1,0,0,0,56.0,1,1,0,3,17,32,0,1,19,0,42,4,0,8,7,68,78,19,0,6,9,0,0,5,0,2,1,2,0,10,21,10,0,1,19,1,0,1,13,6,0,0,5,7,47,26,50,67,19,40,0,2,5,3,23,19,0,6,24,228,68,6,0.07456636710965568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286539094085362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204519082235953,0.0,0.0,0.05070768662424738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0573369336001701,0.0,0.0,0.08235269409068167,0.0,0.0,0.07825280190231705,0.0659478921369413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280761425684561,0.0,0.1577626585091527,0.0,0.0,0.08057975265831165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229063157287401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425027184894739,0.2010463280731545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153085389257395,0.04237778481102169,0.18762819286276156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593879217585942,0.07937728434419078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404171505107252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417635221740218,0.0,0.07782791431210591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052668430279009526,0.18214680238545225,0.07473508913139157,0.0,0.0,0.12523393670533522,0.0,0.0,0.126787317596215,0.20189717274542235,0.0,0.19909451625210006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054814859541759804,0.0,0.11502035837137065,0.0,0.0793021773581099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423640695329466,0.0,0.1953254268038821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134994291609521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16974570085215188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059298168000426366,0.0,0.07546514442331792,0.17825922133890332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635968175000792,0.05740483238410389,0.0,0.0,0.05277845843119955,0.0,0.0595487970950741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517429149950929,0.06865069252720027,0.0,0.0,0.14861574296001356,0.5255702890451937,0.0,0.0,0.08696049661696018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025026744102741,0.0,0.0,0.07762621788532797,0.08969415851829056,0.0,0.0,0.06152506208717099,0.13194352580768842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757257653374494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603659132848176
mentalhealth,hi0L0,2020/01/22,please help me i don't know whats wrong with me but i think i'm a sociopath maybe its normal? but people act like i'm weird whenever i talk about this and sometimes cut me off. I like to watch gore videos and i like to make people miserable i lie a lot and i act different than other people i noticed that a few years ago i would kill someone if it wasn't illegal i think about what it would be like to kill someone. When i was younger like 5-7 i make mummy's with frogs and toilet paper im scared to tell people but there are a few people i really really care about and am very over protective of all i know is something is wrong with me,0.1183695652173924,2.28563277536232,2.138967391304348,95.08932065217392,87.18840579710144,5.478985507246377,17.320652173913047,6.9077264865688965,-0.048552173913043006,505,12,115,7,16,168,79,138,0.168,0.613,0.21899999999999997,0.6061,1,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,14,3,2,4,0,10,0,0,2,1,23,19,10,2,4,4,0,0,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,1,4,1,0,2,2,8,0,0,2,1,18,6,14,14,4,7,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,2,8,69,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104499441364093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392237330062692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266764142288013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152784062084697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749945290444416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30214882643932506,0.0,0.15009067412564034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335617329065416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609151743018264,0.0,0.0,0.18229886823021216,0.0,0.13718470805774735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379184069636288,0.0,0.15546520998844934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4733393687135398,0.0,0.0,0.1498929484033225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17495725011575533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671224435744092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23139991403669066,0.10512430147816072,0.1350532918634265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975522127230387,0.11935235386415274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17499385019734293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266959429543305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19400506233212733,0.29859606894006324,0.0,0.0879349277792324
mentalhealth,kpayne17,2020/01/22,I feel empty It feels like I've felt empty for such a long time. I have desires but I have no motivation to do them and I'm indecisive about everything. I would cry because I wouldn't understand why I felt this way. I get up and I dont want to do anything. And little mishaps make me have anxiety episodes. College last semester was very overwhelming. I thought this semster I would feel better since I like the classes. It is week 2 andbim already tired and wondered if I should have taken a break. I just want to sit around for another month and not do anything and lay in bed. It doesnt help that my friends barely contact me unless I do it first. Idk i just cant wait until summer. I dont know how i am going to make it in these next 4 months.,0.9964364326375732,3.2596387612903257,2.734914611005696,91.69413662239091,83.96774193548387,5.711574952561669,23.311195445920305,7.048011613610866,0.8308899430740033,588,22,126,8,17,194,99,155,0.166,0.728,0.106,-0.6373,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,3,6,6,0,2,3,0,19,1,0,4,0,35,37,11,0,8,6,0,5,2,1,4,1,0,1,0,9,7,0,1,10,0,0,1,7,2,0,1,5,5,21,4,13,28,0,19,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,3,12,80,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539689257011048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15716280469395266,0.1146581956939552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24667781212585396,0.13342544878203966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913657803336949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325571494336412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463672505392146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35131773130219845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347029565814315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273522990838264,0.10707468103247368,0.2878176276290713,0.0,0.0,0.12748830279077347,0.0,0.0,0.11579732617309478,0.0,0.07830639116549143,0.0,0.08518055955748449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004617603379765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237041992194158,0.12217263675465267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14644811301948102,0.15021966672346546,0.0,0.13263955314584372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000928360791744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392664192167712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939964468680362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239827237631101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898839950566062,0.08739654271998297,0.17226562164703155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603091821080095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366713453203387,0.1768068404771554,0.11896818885281425,0.12022512102035167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524386647194067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16253904199718447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21294165735977366,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KureiziDaiamondo,2020/01/22,"I never had a purpose and it's hard to keep going I don't know if this is the right sub, but is the closest I could find, sorry if this isn't right.

So, I'm feeling depressed for a some years now, locked in my room, barely showering, bad eating habits and generally bad. I've been going to therapy for about a year now and I think it helped me figure out a lot about myself.

I always thought I felt like this because my family, since they're unsupportive and even toxic sometimes, so I didn't get to experience good things and felt too stressed to the point of breaking down.

But the more I get asked about what I want or try to talk about what I can do, I can't think about anything, and it's been like this from as a far as I remember. I always wanted any situation to end so I could be free from it, I never enjoyed things most people do like food or music or whatever, I feel like I always felt empty and tried to do whatever other people were doing so I wouldn't be left alone, but I never really felt good from it or felt like I was a part of it.

I never wanted anything. Money, a house, a car, a family, a relationship, travelling, everything other people desired just seemed empty to me. Honestly, even things like helping people or doing something for a bigger cause doesn't motivate me.

I'm not sure if I should continue going to therapy. I don't really want to live a ""normal"" life. It's like I don't care enough about myself to keep trying because if I do try, it'll just be me pretending all over again.

I wish I could find something to enjoy and be passionate about, maybe even dedicate my life to it, but I haven't found it in 23 years and the future doesn't look too bright. I feel like I'm broken and it's too late already.",5.465363128491617,4.948836122905028,6.618932960893854,79.48996368715086,67.65921787709496,9.729832402234637,28.23519553072625,9.255337874911486,2.125701229050279,1364,37,282,23,20,462,163,358,0.11599999999999999,0.6990000000000001,0.185,0.9778,1,1,2,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,0,1,22,22,0,1,17,0,33,5,0,2,6,71,65,29,0,16,16,0,9,8,0,3,2,0,2,0,22,11,2,2,19,2,2,5,15,4,0,0,13,11,38,19,35,42,7,33,0,1,2,1,5,13,0,13,22,194,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828492148948854,0.08341169227001669,0.0,0.18868231802170685,0.0,0.0,0.05140147972238625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12440266219730092,0.0,0.07066326721180921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622330687099315,0.09215377912827026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706557590413819,0.07764825910568947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18104924779751735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0651026275019748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734396163533129,0.0,0.0,0.06694729197954702,0.07810116298803298,0.0,0.14977270854145286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793236189409672,0.07393819836807912,0.14251263818947674,0.0,0.11465656768625385,0.10799816375516227,0.3628749460257515,0.0,0.1381695653876404,0.0,0.091399616303498,0.08287680506824344,0.0,0.0,0.07898175716817411,0.0,0.1288728193883984,0.12679690717306322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771074654599643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132820886781026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721678752026453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13436968548871472,0.0,0.0,0.04154041839551867,0.0,0.08526497670158867,0.0,0.08212506165986824,0.0,0.10677810135798532,0.2954223564152519,0.0,0.06674435228274526,0.0,0.0634737067164463,0.0,0.0,0.064261024001845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593689885642776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23318818159850765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405881908133889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185292153740034,0.0,0.2096089237680048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145376839713352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684542245514917,0.0,0.0,0.08115172050586515,0.0856248826522042,0.1291010861693035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881120146772217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625260163031376,0.08496250493691261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638051444246073,0.07475707977702306,0.08461300991814814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658419449408704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123947561928284,0.0,0.0,0.060753645611954274,0.0,0.0,0.17287972822553885,0.0,0.15064913441611544,0.09686568197775196,0.0,0.06000731699999036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20527335805241306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17833173936883914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692085926043784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460258758703918
mentalhealth,UnnamedEmotion,2020/01/22,"Can somebody please help me (long) Since 7th grade (I'm in high school now) I've had chronic thoughts of suicide and lack of motivation to do anything whatsoever, I went to the doctor to get tested to see if I have depression with my parents, and I didn't answer very truthfully since my parents were in the room but they never gave me the results or anything, so I'm technically not diagnosed with depression. Anyways, I have struggled with self harm and I consider myself lacking many emotion, I'm too scared to ask to go to a therapist or do counseling and I'm trying to do good in school but no matter what I do or tell myself I can't do homework, it's almost crippling at this point because all I do is lay in my bed. I think about killing myself every day and I feel very lonely in the world, no matter what I do or tell myself I can't change how I feel. I mostly came here to find out what to do if I can't do work and I'm starting to fail high school, I want to make it to college. Sorry if this made no sense it's 1 am on a school night and I'm procrastinating whilst being tired. Thank you",3.1374775237605945,4.264030310043669,4.606760852812742,86.0269817621372,73.410480349345,7.309632674030311,26.571024916516823,7.724431198458867,1.3784613922424866,867,30,184,11,17,290,127,229,0.221,0.713,0.066,-0.9915,2,2,0,0,0,2,17.0,0,1,1,3,7,11,1,2,6,0,21,4,0,5,3,43,43,18,2,6,10,2,2,0,0,0,4,0,3,1,8,12,0,0,7,0,0,3,9,8,0,0,8,3,27,3,27,34,4,23,0,4,1,0,10,13,0,9,7,120,35,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624558767263525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19106143439262668,0.0,0.10852681891120056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07076630400812525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277400228105907,0.0,0.0,0.1228059485025375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486730089918261,0.0,0.1999732348738441,0.11782710397127613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11882121659453468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058362722839476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780933577090407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11739538847878575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610253384489532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060651305803521925,0.0,0.0659756130929046,0.09736929472864532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781148967702534,0.24530716520235146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12843442022630827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273442537390597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098454846769427,0.07748979112371683,0.11769523861767378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953439515015826,0.0,0.0,0.10894093442243802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578044698190787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274300095821062,0.10974089494212662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11622456422422195,0.4699499223638589,0.09250728473061644,0.0,0.1211053357890294,0.0,0.0,0.19205875743699996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12995126275995145,0.08216784262378768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136061743718506,0.0,0.12698167544336378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20293244957237488,0.10687843994046006,0.0,0.1347873758481467,0.0,0.07438464665947815,0.0,0.09216108287045932,0.0,0.1334263365025596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881628403153297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19156988548983409,0.06847184240218315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761494691374417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451360985481382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aussiemeatpie1111,2020/01/22,"Never ending trauma My sister died in 2013 then in 2018 my daughter almost died from meningococcal meningitis septicaemia and lost the front of her right leg and had to have over 50 operations to save her leg all while her father was cheating on me and smoking meth to “cope” while I kept our daughter alive in hospital. I spent 5 months in hospital with my daughter. Her father slept with my best friend over 15 years and they were actively smoking meth behind my back. I found the truth out and left late 2018 and since then my daughter has been in and out of hospital with bad immunity and now he’s taking me to court and I’m afraid he’ll be granted access as the family law system in my country is so backwards.
My anxiety does not let up. Nothing I mean nothing helps. I’ve been on antidepressants and ant anxiety medication since my sister died and it’s always helped but the last 6 months I have not been able to get my anxiety under wraps between dealing with my daughters health and lawyers. Now my daughter has been diagnosed with a deformity in her growth plate which requires more surgery which I only found out today and I just want to know if anyone has had one thing after the other happen in terms of bad luck and their anxiety has just crippled them. Please help me. My anxiety is starting to become unbearable. I just want to cry all day everyday but of course I have to put on a brave face and just cop it all and deal with it because my daughter needs me.",7.569137529137527,6.948058524475522,7.318027972027973,76.55575990675995,63.40559440559441,10.563729603729604,34.101631701631696,9.888512548439397,3.1341005128205133,1182,43,223,21,15,375,158,286,0.10400000000000001,0.773,0.12300000000000001,0.5579,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,3,3,8,12,1,1,7,0,19,8,4,0,5,52,36,25,3,4,9,11,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,7,25,0,2,4,0,1,3,3,6,0,1,14,0,36,6,42,19,6,45,0,1,0,0,28,21,0,3,20,151,43,2,0.11130075992263594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145163370105904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926111483736124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4257238834861996,0.0,0.0,0.07782407920947443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558341419460523,0.1858629709991064,0.06784791019253457,0.1229229448779507,0.0,0.0,0.11680328082760473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225865849396104,0.07177978246796632,0.22949239256053935,0.0,0.11296792845888465,0.34653785002771065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740004505088408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857943747568487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492445094109602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24407107686761756,0.08599069102275614,0.0,0.058150053290119866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842289442318257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830750313958735,0.0,0.0,0.22380765977044587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06116798688714535,0.09072497445148896,0.12555210511259968,0.0,0.1209286013175723,0.11381256787809177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214979272472222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212391564915952,0.0,0.1121238061882365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776784093981186,0.0,0.0,0.0825281031958264,0.08584200752653907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21359216188772814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542027540988523,0.08464924332549105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221748114041375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188800519841663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09505024083691077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18413827751664386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877925073510916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368431991134355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394327929637831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055001063503917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13129614381124938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167404025142274
mentalhealth,telllmeimnotxrazy,2020/01/22,"What does it mean if i'm doing something crazy and i know it's crazy but i cant stop I'm really scared, I have had some recent incidents of hearing things, and now I know I'm doing something crazy and that it's harming me but i cant stop",-0.4450000000000003,1.4911989444444451,2.123703703703704,95.86666666666667,87.33333333333334,5.0814814814814815,18.259259259259263,6.42735559955562,-0.177607407407407,189,5,45,2,6,65,31,54,0.28300000000000003,0.632,0.084,-0.9006,0,0,2,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,12,13,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,6,0,1,12,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,4,27,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482496874388533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197272144642126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118054743827837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090099464396042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18173223848466635,0.0,0.2800991083600056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840124908102117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.436780404678815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4743372330772425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884639371977696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AverageGenZ,2020/01/22,"Does anyone else have trouble remembering emotions? So I would like to start off by saying, well I don’t know what to say, but my main overall question is the title. I stay up every night just trying my hardest to remember what it feels like to be happy. The only emotions I feel are anger, sadness(though it’s similar to anger), and boredom. Does anyone else have this problem or should I talk to someone? And help/advice is greatly appreciated",4.643752151462998,6.8526435301204875,5.241514629948366,78.60240963855424,71.5301204819277,6.670567986230638,29.929432013769365,7.447530270364453,2.0595624784853706,355,15,59,4,7,114,61,83,0.14400000000000002,0.677,0.179,0.5218,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,9,2,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,0,14,13,5,0,3,3,0,2,2,0,2,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,4,7,5,9,10,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,4,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195296454059962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174586661383615,0.31865659668203883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721584899394868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25980087414305153,0.3498335186426276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13101559826097894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572511144606251,0.11108935113515804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143948425412106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655328204177561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422848485027833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545882568712787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193905499815047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459263738575725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11826488491843215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14879266008061046,0.0,0.0,0.17419577611670292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35230275494022906,0.0,0.0,0.2473199499280899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175478778331154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006381931050713,0.16574248920026494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498514484797872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527781256051746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557440681618778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981332590876286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104628578747208,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moon__rock,2020/01/22,"I’m in a funk right now and don’t feel like doing anything I have so much to do. A lot of fun stuff to do with friends too but I don’t feel like doing anything

Not particularly depressed, just meh. No energy

I feel bad because I’ve been flaking recently on people and don’t think people understand",4.400322580645163,4.861380161290325,5.8711290322580645,80.57669354838713,69.96774193548387,8.780645161290323,30.01612903225807,8.841846274778883,2.2633741935483864,238,9,49,4,4,81,43,62,0.138,0.631,0.231,0.6523,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,0,12,15,4,0,0,3,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,3,3,4,6,14,2,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,4,32,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3867659032371113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19621312932238014,0.1432523186872443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20240303611008084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.356465450015129,0.3357645778228454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18155851579764104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296158548724766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19978650417944602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17275023042624052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3258354093705645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320317195795861,0.0,0.0,0.2006866144149371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690159596387631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057693429175206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446407258709075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,isaac483930,2020/01/22,Someone give me advice I'm 16 years old I am like your average kid I play video games I have friends and I'm quite popular at my school I am dealing with a lot of stress and being unhappy in my life I just don't know what to do I have lots of things that need done at school at home and my life is just slowly getting worse I am starting to get to the point where I'm lonely and feel like I have no one and I don't do things for myself anymore I just ammuse others I'm a kid who acts like everything is fine but truly I have no clue I don't know if this is just basic teenage stuff but it feels real and I'm not even the emotional or sad type I just have a lot of stuff I need to do and a lot of problems and I don't know how to deal with them I do one and 4 more arise sorry for rambling,-0.3465868631061966,1.3002845469613291,1.9570810313075528,98.94131829343159,84.74585635359118,5.12719459791283,17.79036218538981,6.139981653823899,-0.5104514426028235,617,14,158,5,18,209,95,181,0.135,0.7709999999999999,0.094,-0.7868,0,2,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,1,1,8,11,0,1,6,0,21,2,0,1,0,35,37,14,0,4,10,0,2,3,1,0,2,0,1,2,10,11,0,0,5,3,0,1,7,4,0,2,1,2,23,7,17,35,5,10,0,2,0,0,10,6,0,6,6,108,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718033171888918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290730746276984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683563046502787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331878600847587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464003781758005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859623460139749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116969745467426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161473328757467,0.09297864355934077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055298051373672,0.0,0.1359952131052607,0.12485101100435235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305503001400436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145798569719585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838565153499236,0.19075303473815733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4425929210404886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930080257243084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656973465322805,0.0,0.17638498757089707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12303310041141692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453524630861593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384297378684877,0.0,0.14813832920868905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634359598444231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11027502929274073,0.0,0.0,0.1456914194855727,0.09212030244015494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908551549060098,0.0,0.2979794853312211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17293074479987386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13263319523145134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381184389871757
mentalhealth,Stu19311,2020/01/22,"I should really know how to find help So as the title says, I should know how to go about finding a mental health counselor, I am currently in my masters of social work program. I spend a lot of time finding services for others but honestly, when it comes to myself, I'm unsure how to navigate this. If it helps I am located in the United States, Texas specifically.",6.616690140845073,6.4657849999999994,7.453626760563381,73.23846830985919,65.19718309859155,10.480281690140846,33.24295774647887,10.125756701596842,3.342518309859156,289,11,52,6,4,97,52,71,0.034,0.79,0.17600000000000002,0.8873,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,4,0,4,1,0,3,0,14,9,8,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,1,11,7,1,8,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,3,38,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064560162041433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6571669938198779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13621099563015893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25475989424156426,0.0,0.0,0.32129388370968576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634346843065813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037603763395161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415327825126909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535398792093171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19059661892194535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443151968042744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397545421204809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17448391008375544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scotsgirl200,2020/01/22,"Repressed memories This is going to be longish,so apologies and on mobile .I've (38 f) had mental health issues all my life as far back as I can remember. My mum first got leukaemia when I was 5, parents divorced at 6, most of my grandparents died young, mums leukaemia came back a few times. Trying to tldr my life, but was traumatic. Abandonment issues, suicide attempts, psychosis, drug abuse, homelessness. However, amongst all the pretty messed up and confused memories I have a lot. Silly things, childminder, mums job, being told to be quiet due to my dads nightshift, wallpapers, playing at parks, good memories even before and out with the trauma I went through. I smoke cannabis, I suffer major anxiety and for everything I've been prescribed? It truly is the one thing in life that calms me down and gets me ""normal"" to me that I can function. (Ex heroin addict, now clean of all opiates, prescribed or not for over 4 years) danced the drug dance with anti psychotic, anti depressants that either put me ""up"" or ""numb"". Had a heart attack 6 months ago, can only guess smoking, diet or previous lifestyle, had to come off my anti psychotics due to my heart. And shit seems to have hit me about my past... or might not because I've been prescribed anti psychotics previously.. like I said, I'm 38, traumatic childhood anyway, but I have a brother who is 4 years older than me. He doesn't seem to resonate in my childhood memories. Sporadic contact as adults, no more than 2 years before I ""hunt"" for him. But i feel nothing for him, except ""hes my brother"" and our parents are now deceased (mum 2005, dad 2011) have few memories except his wallpaper n others. Is a repressed memory a ""thing""? Because I feel as if  im getting ""crumbs"" of my brother in my childhood and they are not good.... but  even though it's just hit me that these are the only memories I have of him, even though I know he was there, and I remember my mum/dad all the trauma of what 100% happened in my life, the crumbs of memories about my brother seem ""unreal"", even though I know it was me, him, mum and dad, he just doesn't seem to exist in my past except blocked out memories if that makes sense.",6.966360551431599,6.861927356097564,6.8748568398727485,77.52347295864264,64.46341463414635,9.764581124072107,34.65535524920466,9.318704503766252,3.0980827147401917,1696,69,309,27,23,539,209,410,0.19399999999999998,0.7509999999999999,0.055,-0.9966,5,0,3,0,4,1,86.0,1,0,1,2,18,18,2,3,13,0,31,13,3,1,4,60,54,28,2,3,19,15,2,1,0,1,9,2,1,1,16,16,1,4,10,3,0,7,6,12,0,2,14,4,48,6,49,34,11,44,0,3,0,0,33,16,1,15,22,208,64,1,0.0,0.10812732475495967,0.0,0.09948608629594873,0.0,0.0,0.0808958460358263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981309991782371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382060636909653,0.0,0.1403455074577734,0.0,0.11126162090552508,0.0,0.15530985255731738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437630532610792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861178964027278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860148470955379,0.0,0.0947127253435564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211663585324761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24110357675855426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201795702547872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228686867328692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762509751019273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535841511465283,0.0,0.051864752270441586,0.1530879097019536,0.0729883834383312,0.0,0.10053238631007083,0.0,0.0807002804998818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700434786600358,0.0,0.2162853739585424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857568328477584,0.19050195820866514,0.09056075451776432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10030742802953026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25783651515294925,0.0445846748465133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775853769549942,0.0,0.0,0.060916278480965924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196789049413208,0.0968116751964977,0.0,0.0,0.07284228715907212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941471886757403,0.08756574107038162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06183965038445844,0.13881359048633804,0.0,0.0,0.20266526273201155,0.0,0.17423461918702832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284349673558434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174078304648664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067579501100908,0.0,0.08680847407334724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323160866186008,0.0,0.0,0.09367634016713874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982284106222214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188583302504374,0.0,0.2689853397014768,0.0,0.053214020440966944,0.0,0.0,0.08720215350188397,0.0,0.06195906115212507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459826746010675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763039540773932
mentalhealth,ah-frick-you-cuck,2020/01/22,"Idk what to put as a title but I’d like some help So I don’t really know what to do or if this is normal or if it isn’t but today my cat was trying to come through the cat door and she ended up getting a paw stuck and made a little meow to show that she was hurt so I immediately helped her and even gave her a little snack 
but  when she made that meow there was a little voice in my head telling me to make her stay there and suffer
 basically I’ve always had thoughts like this like if someone where to be sad I do my best to help them but I always have a little voice telling me to berate them and make them even more sad basically a sadistic voice that is always in my head telling me to make others suffer for no reason and I hate it and I don’t know if I should tell someone about it what if it’s nothing, please I would really appreciate some advice 
(Also sorry I’m horrible at formatting I didn’t try to make it hurt your eyes I promise)",2.5707352941176467,3.4966459754902,4.348313725490197,88.11041176470589,74.5392156862745,7.008627450980391,21.93333333333333,7.3011,0.54563568627451,745,17,168,8,15,253,102,204,0.203,0.6829999999999999,0.114,-0.9664,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,3,1,10,12,1,0,8,0,16,4,3,7,0,34,31,23,0,8,11,0,0,3,0,2,0,3,1,0,14,8,1,0,4,1,0,2,5,7,0,0,10,4,27,5,18,18,4,15,0,6,1,0,18,9,0,9,6,115,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625248869459386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695362585401853,0.2714233404068844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410842434366865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366372778891344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963050370103742,0.0,0.0,0.14363405212999722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05680842960421161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735118450793324,0.22318255987172245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21864402464980973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23280154295068964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951346836341215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936414375592695,0.43591554840999097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20577131525660408,0.2903201034686451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653511294753952,0.10433210810721652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935602429170995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930655274136916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13931410394729413,0.11179548565019758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842579924877283,0.0,0.0,0.12171753047480847,0.0,0.11589475738895315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38014923580666105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632174227962597,0.0,0.0,0.10306603391989276,0.0,0.0,0.1476449439547233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724070137749997,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theblanketthing,2020/01/22,"Health insurance for seeing a psychiatrist in Australia? I'm hoping someone can help me with some information. I live in Melbourne, Australia and I have seen a psychiatrist once, without health insurance, and it cost me almost $350.

I'm at a point where I need to go back, i could never afford the ongoing appointment costs so i just didnt return for my follow up appointments. I dont have health insurance and I'm thinking I'm going to need it if I plan on seeking a diagnosis which could take several sessions, plus getting on the right medication.

I have seen psychologists for years under the mental healthcare plans and have been on several antidepressants managed by GPs and it's not helping.

Hoping someone here has experience with this and can guide me in the right direction. Is health insurance worth it, how much of a psychiatrist visit would it cover, etc.

Thanks in advance.",5.675954415954418,7.8849884567901265,6.460123456790125,70.94209401709405,68.75308641975309,9.675973409306744,32.831908831908834,10.035473477838034,3.7785692307692313,718,33,116,19,13,236,100,162,0.027999999999999997,0.903,0.069,0.7253,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,6,3,0,0,9,0,14,5,0,1,1,26,32,10,0,8,4,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,2,0,3,5,5,0,0,0,4,3,12,3,21,25,3,23,0,0,3,0,4,14,0,5,4,81,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332450124110227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023184919579112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21248256951902345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595076308507522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840224386056144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301627476996799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952078058475357,0.0,0.15124739891453667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5657659453044567,0.0,0.0,0.17838084206573426,0.0,0.0,0.2643264167424085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749851197764888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13404862226780187,0.13409785655933673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978178185165616,0.1973314839705497,0.10262765092291436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170949522230952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257890918813995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272729452123685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603528743605488,0.0,0.0,0.30065032803695696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22549046956539806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004804662714437,0.0,0.0,0.12250803958634678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526244622069977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826956126271166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945253000318732,0.0,0.0,0.08568926327688471
mentalhealth,fubu_73,2020/01/22,"Feelings of being not wanted/alone forever I’m in university 2 hours away from home. The only time my family even talks to me when I’m home is when we’re talking about my grades, which weren’t too good last semester but they berated me and I felt like they wanted me to drop out. 

Ultimately I came back but now that I’m back I live in my apartment with roommates I barely see (which I can deal with that). I have friends but I don’t feel like there’s anyone in my life that would call to check on me like if I have a breakdown or if I’m in the hospital I doubt my family would find out because they always seem to be so busy. 

Long story short I’m not suicidal or anything just don’t feel like anyone would miss a step if I were to just never leave my room again. I’ve never had this feeling and I have no clue to deal with it honestly",2.3030247406225044,3.5321562737430203,3.899221867517956,89.87984636871509,75.64804469273744,7.348922585794092,22.282920989624905,7.957251820313856,0.8353412609736637,659,17,150,10,14,220,105,179,0.059000000000000004,0.769,0.172,0.9663,1,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,3,0,13,9,0,1,4,0,15,1,0,0,2,34,30,13,1,7,12,0,5,4,1,3,1,0,3,0,7,8,0,0,7,0,1,2,8,2,0,0,5,6,24,7,20,20,0,26,0,1,1,0,9,11,0,7,16,97,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410806866920968,0.0,0.0,0.11334422383725255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904934774863471,0.0,0.11209574382390322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798122235195428,0.20948634857860274,0.0,0.08303718131999321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13909372910510914,0.15579701464594792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28086939389189003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997065321023373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568282687844729,0.0,0.27550349833515986,0.19462822232132712,0.13079056756937438,0.0,0.1245007135087582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524162913825144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425313070545615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732753659022356,0.0,0.1341472148018563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11103578772583876,0.0,0.14423511177379034,0.0,0.0,0.0962147472121154,0.26619678550011283,0.0,0.12028292133030075,0.1205485750195298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21011931903652836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359986839200308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854804816024384,0.1240076807955663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14900029831848308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21897361276995514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794297661342622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034486006519798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29029591190788084,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PeachScone77,2020/01/22,"How to help my partner when they can't get up in the mornings and get to work due to Depression? My (27f) partner (29m) suffers from Depression and had a rough time a few years ago where he couldn't get himself out of bed and to work. 

This culminated in him leaving his job and getting help, which was mostly bandaid solution time stuff, and eventually finding a new job. 

Well the cycle has started again and I don't know how to be of help. 

He is seeing a new psychologist soon but in the meantime I'm scared he's going to lose his job again if he can't get up and go to work.

 What can I do to help him best?",3.975523255813954,4.014940069767444,5.1514631782945735,86.84952034883725,70.78294573643413,8.31046511627907,29.30329457364341,8.07648339933343,1.6673015503875968,475,17,109,6,8,158,78,129,0.10400000000000001,0.7609999999999999,0.135,0.5122,3,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,5,8,7,0,1,7,0,11,1,0,2,0,16,22,12,0,2,2,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,2,4,8,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,5,1,0,2,2,10,2,17,18,3,21,0,4,1,0,16,7,0,2,12,69,14,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921133943833513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15297073746253376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25109331613060554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332260144202889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38077939558924656,0.0,0.1656825273212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3908112000766994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4339460045922887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010829830230119,0.0,0.0,0.15434344542720393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16307307063388174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815603180712907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14593558615634267,0.0,0.11615534900909262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317278758190024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686535611307926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999277948168506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105969487038072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3183546423600269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386748999252664
mentalhealth,clinggi,2020/01/22,"Overcoming mental health issues Overcoming mental health issues

Hi there r/mentalhealth community!  I am a teenager studying to be a physiologist and I’m working on a project.  Does anyone have an stories of how they overcame issues with mental health?  The more the better would be amazing. Thanks so much for your help.",4.7640259740259685,8.229201454545457,5.067012987012987,72.72909090909094,79.9090909090909,6.779220779220778,29.675324675324674,7.957251820313856,2.8872597402597404,260,12,36,5,7,82,43,55,0.0,0.778,0.222,0.9165,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,1,2,3,3,0,0,6,0,5,3,0,1,0,4,7,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,5,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,25,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987610300190225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162635295865934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15002988729853484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5467038958759365,0.0,0.0,0.1149138345003399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5368221374393267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5183190767705219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602946009251625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784058896637318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12481168290432923,0.0,0.0,0.1217873461989248,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway2535366665,2020/01/22,Can people under 18 get depressed? I think that i have depression and i dont want to bring it up to anyone because the last time i said this kind of thing to my family they told me that kids cant get depressed. Is this true?,3.84,3.9094446666666687,4.908333333333335,88.37000000000002,71.08333333333334,8.066666666666668,24.333333333333336,7.793537801064563,0.9622833333333336,176,4,40,2,3,58,38,48,0.23,0.716,0.054000000000000006,-0.8435,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,1,4,12,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,1,7,2,6,10,0,5,0,3,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,26,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17224977066868907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15016929322809286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6365283541322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887138664796792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23223162799646266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574096203987156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565298412853021,0.0,0.20080360991009516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17078422737677101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23432998893433224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636603096454163,0.15784757975480396,0.0,0.0,0.14364543270910532,0.0,0.0,0.2353926835285805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453003420721337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Matmun48,2020/01/22,"I have no clue what to title this, but can anyone help me understand? Sorry if the title is offensive.

I have no motivation, no actual goals, no actual dreams. I listen to music almost 24/7 because my mind does not make sense and music helps me keep it on tract and stops it from going actually insane. I often feel like I'm immortal and how nothing will ever kill me and I'm immortal but I know it's not true. I feel a lot of things but I can just stop feeling them whenever I want? Almost like I'm acting out my emotions to the point I'm not sure when they are real and if they are ever real. I also don't have very good memory at all unless it's visual. I can remeber faces and places but never words? I hate myself but also love myself? Like I'm so horrible that it's wonderful and my entire life is such a disaster that it makes me laugh. Also each time I enter a new place with new people I make myself a new identity to match what the people there expect me to be and then when they collide I want to scream because being everything at once hurts my head. Though the one thing that never ever goes away is the feeling that everyone in the room hates me no matter how much they express that they like me. I want to hide myself from them even though I want them to like me.",3.135795454545459,4.38580341287879,4.9337575757575785,83.20063636363638,73.58333333333334,7.855757575757576,21.53333333333333,8.395991825355821,1.144464242424243,1007,22,203,17,20,344,139,264,0.18899999999999997,0.5920000000000001,0.21899999999999997,0.8705,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,8,2,18,16,4,0,10,0,15,4,2,6,8,61,40,27,1,7,12,0,4,5,0,1,1,2,1,0,16,11,0,3,8,1,0,3,11,6,0,1,0,6,40,10,19,37,4,27,0,1,0,1,13,10,0,7,19,149,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.28272344276174405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19340747107504333,0.0,0.0,0.2316877626977121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752596551891228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073334921113713,0.0,0.0,0.11773979700703192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451153101270233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863143114375316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637854409143608,0.26206695062774005,0.0,0.09227947398506764,0.08679342914940215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953204904903167,0.06899164634347685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054884562659095235,0.08100070476163528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906913447048081,0.09911158095664747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294614594869306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338320782883513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583836519237575,0.10684352375125533,0.0,0.05307389968964528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821224315275376,0.2359030240315473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210276337023457,0.08716074611304624,0.0,0.1933893341944812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751102465803757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099213907912352,0.0,0.14896583420432175,0.2798119120226843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926642313359024,0.0,0.0,0.1028469081218702,0.06544024636702374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339028760879996,0.0,0.2017960978307763,0.0,0.09129253586828877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21984203742780187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810537241288863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16147841391969794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101874581428468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831738913821095,0.0,0.18976462285655774,0.0,0.056312391583505726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053571791246127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796826955511328,0.2278446200667729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472911050817273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,greypixiedust9,2020/01/22,"if anyone has mental health questions, i’m not a professional, sorry. but I recently was in a psychiatric hospital for a few weeks and a very intensive outpatient group therapy program which was 6 hours 5 days a week for 6 weeks. i’ve been on most anti-depressants and benzos and have been through a lot. 

so if you’re considering any type of hospitalization, therapy, or medication and have questions about the experience or anything like that, i’m an open book :) feel free to instant message me on here if I can be of any help! or if you just need someone to talk to, i’m here.",5.872589285714284,6.446880366071429,7.085714285714285,72.75928571428572,66.76785714285714,11.042857142857144,34.75,10.914260884657429,3.9379678571428567,459,21,87,13,7,156,77,112,0.0,0.845,0.155,0.9490000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,8,0,9,2,0,0,0,21,14,13,0,5,10,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,4,3,12,9,3,10,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,11,7,55,6,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412164595831213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401150884623713,0.0,0.14594895857092868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11438001218809793,0.0,0.15275654903710692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17348829775551247,0.0,0.0,0.08967657310841165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18852124074196605,0.0,0.0,0.11887805531572708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17466003282228684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664723185142413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15078181389552633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786676119297213,0.17873323418785994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315073008700171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3973588436733784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511775233868615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15027324797741767,0.0,0.0,0.1985356335786408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14255211504057952,0.0,0.0,0.4056443141470009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463373567233741,0.0,0.0,0.42679309636568186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Transpice,2020/01/22,"How do I stop dissociating, and start remembering? Hello, I have derealisation/depersonalization. I am new to this diagnosis, since I was young I've been living with a mental illness without a name and it feels great to finally get a label for it, but also scary. My therapist thinks there is more to my illness than a dissosiative disorder, she thinks I have mood disorders that revolve around 'cycling', which basically means my emotions are constantly changing (unusual and fast changes without reason, unrelated to bipolar disorder) and I have no control over it. 
I have never experienced any physical trauma (that I can remember). The only trauma I think I could have is from being mentally ill, and suffering through anxiety. I know in most cases people with my illness have experienced trauma, but I havent. 
 Every day wake up, go school, sit in school for 7 hours, go home, sleep, repeat. I'm in a constant loop, and I don't know how to break it. I've recently started to draw and paint again, but this doesn't really help me anymore. 
In my classes (mostly in boring classes, but I notice it in classes I enjoy as well) I find myself staring off into space, and then waking up. I am failing my a class because I 'day dream' so often in this class. I think I'm really close to giving up, I haven't found any method of relief and I just want to do well. 
Even if I am paying attention I gain very little from the class because I csnt remember what happened, I've heard some people use the analogy that having dissosiative disorder is like being drunk, saying it's not that youre forgetting but that your brain isn't all there, and that your brain isnt taking notes on what going on (like being blackout drunk).
I just want some sort of tips to help me stop dissociating, to improve my memory, and help me control this.",7.397540279269602,7.279624052478132,8.135657511124753,68.88767224182908,63.57725947521866,11.069449133036674,34.67070738069664,10.65788864234165,3.7770443148688053,1442,57,250,33,19,485,186,343,0.187,0.72,0.09300000000000001,-0.9877,0,0,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,3,0,4,14,14,0,0,9,0,29,12,5,6,2,62,53,23,0,4,11,0,1,2,0,0,5,2,1,0,19,16,2,4,15,3,1,3,11,6,2,0,4,6,40,7,39,45,6,42,0,2,1,0,12,19,0,7,20,176,59,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122869220597926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114036543554428,0.0,0.06813777565783474,0.0,0.08833281838383411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929056654984352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859164502810192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988616060224518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18844703215806968,0.0,0.0,0.1925045556912847,0.19979760185089795,0.07111459358263615,0.0,0.0,0.11488466830940705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083245672799586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019098138034503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05882943689226465,0.0,0.07504473223053257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04503611758556978,0.0,0.0,0.09757107156701042,0.08140773248906799,0.0,0.0,0.0976598972084154,0.0,0.0,0.046535036431680055,0.0854433948512983,0.1518604184134052,0.0,0.0,0.0981992248278956,0.0,0.0,0.07876369355748117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910383588378112,0.0,0.08934377665898433,0.0,0.0877153252296408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790032294706326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870295281557505,0.08927084443155785,0.07864982944031003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702258631018554,0.0,0.0,0.17952182319907592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686957400999454,0.08602369121684794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140599576600948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774122118878897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12349888447252493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412015695208665,0.09157808152548574,0.08794519474011872,0.0,0.3026944836282452,0.0,0.0,0.07083148748689899,0.0,0.18028578666642228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367905073063581,0.0,0.08913363126013563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608742711648188,0.0,0.0,0.14893185694061858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696903365514892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034163298304426,0.0,0.2282880605057285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692728304435613,0.0,0.07349150593196745,0.10507076932694244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16016800662441813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717192659872106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,datawkwardperson,2020/01/22,"I feel like i'm isolating myself In the last two years my social life has changed quite a bit. I dropped out of the swimming team i used to be in a year and a half ago and stopped talking to all the friends i had there (they were literally like my family) and also changed the friend group i used to be in cuz i felt i did not fit in at all. From that new friend group i feel like I only like 3 people. I've ditched so many people that i feel like i don't really care about anyone else anymore. I'm currently on school break and i have avoided all the gatherings that they have planned and i only talk to one of the three girls I'm genuinely friends with through text messages. The only people I've talked with in the past two months have been my parents and my sister and i feel kind of lonely, but every opportunity i have to see my friends i just pass because i prefer just staying at home doing nothing and avoid minor dicomforts. What should I do?",3.6650510204081637,4.675246423469389,4.439387755102043,88.16989795918369,72.01020408163265,7.4367346938775505,27.26530612244898,7.7094869923839395,1.3720755102040818,753,26,162,9,14,242,110,196,0.046,0.809,0.146,0.9494,2,4,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,4,6,16,0,2,11,0,15,1,0,3,3,31,27,12,0,2,4,2,5,5,5,1,1,0,1,1,4,11,0,3,6,2,0,2,2,3,0,5,5,6,26,13,22,19,4,24,0,1,1,0,19,10,0,0,14,102,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725540867604487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773875807620507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088074418094959,0.07671502737400965,0.1124156142934187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688102629110165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977997118346405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186138771388447,0.0,0.23212708323890535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165250355667433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243931626636784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103429198365243,0.0,0.22190007443096835,0.2351404825008598,0.10534326008160498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4238262940422712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005272963918172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142509143556706,0.0,0.08943207512701266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749469497389869,0.26800515634423944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123342470199267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757317901608883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596308311643562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527415622860424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434547959187816,0.2503287832583957,0.0,0.0,0.12182512401632285,0.0,0.10473503847802616,0.22818695132183975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166950248243097,0.0,0.0,0.07028600787364428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111037073200508,0.08742836338430797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184025892599604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116941208385273,0.0,0.09172635184825148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645534154685722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143505225000186,0.0,0.0,0.1895164453383557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14130526222080558
mentalhealth,lastsyndrome,2020/01/22,"Can’t relax my body So I am 24y old and have this issue for a really long time. I can’t seem to relax my muscles even when I go to sleep I get burning pain from muscle tension, headaches and jaw tension too.
This is mostly in the area of my back, neck and head but it can also be any other body part.
When I try to relax I do it for a few seconds and then it automatically goes back to flexing without me realizing. I hover my head over the pillow not really resting it.
My neck and jaw are so tense and I wake up sometimes in pain.
Is anybody experiencing this too? Any advice how to learn to relax? 
Thank you.",0.9715925480769236,3.013997445312505,3.5531250000000014,87.12552884615386,82.359375,5.500961538461539,20.783653846153847,6.67199483983844,0.3654956730769232,475,14,101,5,13,166,80,128,0.10400000000000001,0.784,0.11199999999999999,0.2814,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,11,9,0,2,4,0,10,12,10,1,0,14,14,14,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,8,6,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,4,0,1,0,1,15,5,15,13,4,14,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,8,77,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17357893419649098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420514275542699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24159031019132576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731745125059753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3946159412183907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732358455485607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280485365776804,0.0,0.10095177732699356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3646012564009638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18540058925913053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719782428635853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863938288587124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3780237653524448,0.0,0.0,0.1923570372982326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275899038112681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16170856945179266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17775925924602745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756815775525523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16353873748368625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357805073894437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059977289014535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712299223570961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pooppooppoopyyy,2020/01/22,"Does anyone have time to talk? I got married last week. My bride is sleeping on my lap and I can feel the rhythm of our serrated kitchen knife against my arm. I stopped the suicidal thoughts for now but the self harming thoughts are so loud. She told me she can't handle how bad my condition is getting. I'm going through a medication change right now and the old stuff is leaving my system but the new stuff isn't kicking in yet. I take 4 others meds and their doses were adjusted as well. My friend texted to check in but he's too busy to see that I texted him back that I'm struggling.

Anyone available?",2.223087431693987,4.471007237704921,2.689754098360656,93.88632513661207,79.08196721311475,5.706010928961749,25.740437158469945,6.816661863887847,0.9038830601092886,481,19,102,5,12,148,88,122,0.10400000000000001,0.812,0.085,-0.3474,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,1,0,8,5,0,1,6,0,9,5,2,1,0,12,20,9,1,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,2,1,1,1,5,3,1,1,4,0,1,1,2,3,1,0,5,3,17,2,11,15,0,17,0,0,1,0,10,4,0,0,11,62,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495358974388089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13720775294652113,0.14898821720739044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887636686664909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15615223398231914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022357827123342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786070117187124,0.0,0.09322645305450712,0.0,0.10141038705205976,0.0,0.1427131122923282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14545072778136506,0.0,0.1889400022173424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982043129674022,0.17975744066388186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233646357141913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872405898060709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238501624395664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421919268329743,0.0,0.1861496756254614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17856679455812732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149182098415023,0.0,0.18654206623061267,0.4085374751968043,0.19518213248124325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341631155983614,0.14342164807686192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833195675459473,0.10404859125472364,0.0,0.0,0.17050508777690704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313214328941698,0.0,0.16043712754289358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PuzzlePrince,2020/01/22,"advice on mental health services  not sure if this is the right sub to post in, but I had a question about some mental health services in Toronto. I'm debating on going to a mental health facility for something called ""day treatment"" Has anyone been to one of these programs? What is it like? It's fairly demanding (9 hours/week) and I'm not sure if it is worth a shot. It's also a group environment and I prefer to speak to mental health professionals one-on-one for confidentiality. Looking for advice from people who have been to these types of programs",4.187568134171909,6.315878301886798,5.1448427672955965,79.15414046121593,72.58490566037736,6.975262054507338,25.928721174004195,7.793537801064563,1.5878293501048222,444,15,79,6,9,145,65,106,0.066,0.878,0.055999999999999994,0.1744,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,5,0,8,4,0,0,2,12,12,6,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,9,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,3,2,2,3,17,9,1,8,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,4,2,51,11,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710002964873704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088897152716697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695658649275392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14159070803404028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942634153825202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788055351105368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5895703117807629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774387238346402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644222839953937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5589598720599941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18792364857676652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613165607693908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280108810783942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533460343204109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841767985529973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674976415434098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613769927816303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122731577437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bkards,2020/01/22,"Alarmed about my sense of reality Recently I’ve been super out of touch with reality, and it’s scary. I feel like Im living life through VR goggles. Its as if Im high without doing any drugs all the time. Any help or diagnosis for this? Will go through means necessary to help feeling like myself again.",2.5669999999999997,4.955867033333334,4.043333333333333,83.885,78.66666666666666,7.333333333333335,28.33333333333333,8.344100000000001,2.1713333333333336,242,11,48,5,6,80,50,60,0.08199999999999999,0.687,0.231,0.8481,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,10,7,4,0,1,3,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,3,3,3,11,5,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,5,26,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054498115278714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26044628331475944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271129623722113,0.3208858863843529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276363333178127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010680088228069,0.2372854577260635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4851787858991604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586304086538583,0.21944091778951907,0.0,0.1983118962277216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24463795033011615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22174972860259573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095680887027067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164910814116954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,999Scb_,2020/01/22,"Does Anybody Else Have A Sense Of ""Territorial Anxiety""? A little background to start off. Mobile user, so bad formatting. 

Im a guy with ADD, not sure if this has anything to do with this though. I also have minor anxiety and depression. 

I dont have social anxiety, in fact i love meeting new people and would consider myself extraverted.

The problem is, whenever people come to my house in groups bigger than 1 or 2, my mind and body start going nuts. I get stomach aches, headaches, irritable, paranoia, worrying, and sometimes even sweating.

I can almost always hide this stuff completely though. Other than the odd time someone will ask if im feeling ok, nobody notices this. But it feels like hell to me.

Something probably worth noting is that this only happens at my house. I dont know if it could just be instincts to protect my own space but im totally fine at parties and in groups outside of my house.

I just came here to ask if anyone else experiences this or if anyone has anything to say or suggest.",4.039393188854491,6.371073589473685,5.102507739938083,78.3866718266254,73.63157894736842,7.628482972136222,30.123839009287924,8.4952907291091,2.638179566563468,802,36,136,15,17,263,123,190,0.13,0.7829999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.4858,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,0,8,9,1,0,5,1,15,4,3,0,3,34,28,19,0,8,13,0,2,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,11,10,0,1,3,0,1,3,3,4,0,0,1,3,14,5,19,23,2,16,1,1,0,1,10,9,1,9,5,90,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091409749369043,0.0,0.0,0.08716184595911862,0.09069109790381036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501385658764051,0.0,0.0,0.15242120005654428,0.11167644347019752,0.1793842815021826,0.0,0.20378791246900105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100479367544388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106690680158567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12465921800007218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388801597762013,0.1142773270625001,0.0,0.0,0.08702222460255601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387570854250868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538070930629057,0.0,0.2554785056082334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18209971446908232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198899990241323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10661629225255836,0.0,0.0,0.11022050305903744,0.07786478467015946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569444636921129,0.0,0.06194336386597029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792043273228268,0.0963823525662332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.377290658123648,0.0,0.0,0.3531941723854796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598998283120491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0532485862934988,0.10923984913948363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983706446718889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005209094684247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526633987600116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124089513769649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289426217829901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112436310621455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11751313550670722,0.10429180042271637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667579047408189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110487125961882,0.09234960934759913,0.08390831271361712,0.107797090561729,0.0,0.1542919371301589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12477117095514755,0.0,0.0,0.10272482857553004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21417058846772916,0.0,0.06355482840751127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068791484133313,0.0,0.0774256628072376,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IvanRambles,2020/01/22,"Any advice for first therapy appointment? Hey all, I'm a 21 year old male going to therapy at school for the first time. The first session is just a 25 minute preliminary assessment/chat. That said, I was wondering if there's anything I could do to prepare myself, either materially or mentally, for my first go at therapy?

Thanks in advance for y'alls help.",5.579999999999997,7.437089727272728,6.5428484848484825,71.66427272727277,68.39393939393939,10.734545454545453,32.89696969696969,10.793553405168565,4.09764606060606,286,13,49,9,5,95,52,66,0.0,0.905,0.095,0.7149,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,5,2,1,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,7,10,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,2,1,5,1,9,7,2,13,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,3,7,33,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16602187876473293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553613165960246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981117310298669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13564933567010345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5780589349801086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931133384825825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387871850977463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17121672801900378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782788550956612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616114365057591,0.0,0.0,0.1719453487675801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641879916787113,0.5828778222753143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906860335368974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842466003798339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940842501934576
mentalhealth,KacyKrubs,2020/01/22,"I’ve been having episodes of extreme sadness where I cry and tense up. During the day I’m super happy, happiest I’ve ever been in my life! But for some reason at night time something changes and I’m wondering if it’s a mental disorder I haven’t heard of? To go into more detail, there is a trigger: just the act of trying to sleep. I’ll start trying to sleep and suddenly my head is filled with childhood memories of getting hit by my mother when I was scared. From 6-15 I had panic disorder and was scared of the dark so would have major fear at bedtime - crying, sometimes screaming (after age 12 I would also hit myself and bite my hands) because I was so scared. My mum would often get very angry at me and hit me. This was obviously not helpful and I remember at age 10 wanting to die because of the fact she hated me. We are closer now though and my life is amazing. So why has all of this suddenly been brought back into my mind and why is it stopping me sleeping AND making me severely low all of a sudden. I really thought I’d passed all of this.",5.0220214669051915,5.109157348837211,6.1725581395348845,80.26520572450806,68.53488372093024,8.661896243291594,30.49194991055457,8.384062270229773,2.2108819320214668,830,30,163,11,13,279,131,215,0.22899999999999998,0.7070000000000001,0.064,-0.9883,0,0,1,0,1,0,19.0,1,0,0,1,13,12,1,5,7,0,20,7,5,3,6,38,36,18,1,5,4,2,1,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,5,14,0,1,4,0,0,5,2,9,0,0,11,3,23,3,26,19,6,32,0,2,0,0,6,11,0,4,16,112,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707226069027028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933382646991936,0.0,0.14799143643505394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841018742177812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666734234820225,0.07828386374971122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597940024775967,0.0,0.27823751646751865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980049638112103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659288523336355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12683824587609294,0.0,0.06898640453358451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921754813199945,0.0,0.11984344603936728,0.12457695363826203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136241032972535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714769025129251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102603109054865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232843732957405,0.0,0.12256515616835212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391244461419435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14242020006009534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776291605658306,0.1248049223991022,0.0,0.0,0.13750656238030814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3645853867104438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13713151632334591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36442069152133005,0.0,0.0,0.09344879650251184,0.12005375931997575,0.0,0.08591756506929897,0.0,0.0,0.1014840480309434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926103082809368,0.09636684597688833,0.07078109467980931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16482611677671502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015608038567396,0.07159654905313577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190637894747099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163783100241214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586871827267045,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jaguar843,2020/01/22,"How to find help? Hello all,

I am a 33 year old professional who lives in northern Virginia.  All my life I've thought that I would benefit from seeing a therapist, but lately life has been really hard and I'm at the point where I know I need professional help.  My biggest barrier is finding a reputable doctor.  Also, it is important that they  are covered by my insurance (FEP Blue).  Finances are a big part of my current struggle, so it's important that this doesn't break the bank.  What should I even be looking for?  Therapist?  Psychologist?  Psychiatrist?  What's the difference?  Any advice would be greatly appreciated!",3.5484547311095973,6.552219053097348,4.92566371681416,75.23000680735196,79.70796460176993,8.432675289312456,30.81620149761743,9.057496981413335,3.4722476514635803,495,25,82,14,13,164,84,113,0.059000000000000004,0.785,0.156,0.9043,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,1,7,0,13,3,0,1,2,14,19,5,0,4,1,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,9,1,0,1,4,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,10,2,7,12,3,11,0,0,3,0,5,6,0,0,4,56,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750703869316786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327198459446516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12183307058522855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18718118999678832,0.0,0.18337503243442693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833167105968664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32749295357875485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19752149577652428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16048970200607166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401706505326575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846013682592487,0.0,0.2020971765995352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530881217810237,0.0,0.0,0.15819913019522627,0.0,0.15044696441536398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284282753390345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18799539178545974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19400983826016427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693615058501355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477271912753716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276512919223733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18729405233029325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160307414162946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14223084096363078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545363340316977,0.0,0.0,0.1153713922781557
mentalhealth,krice_rispies,2020/01/22,"saw my psychiatrist today and need advice i (17f) was officially diagnosed with and medicated for depression at the beginning of 2019 due to a mental breakdown but all my emotions and feelings had been building up inside me since i was like 12/13 and in middle school.

i really hated myself because i couldn’t live up to my expectations and i couldn’t get myself to be as academically successful as my smart older sister and even though i’ve been on varsity field hockey since freshman year the sport makes me feel really bad about myself and really anxious because i’m really afraid of messing up.

a lot of the anxiety and depression itself had to do with the college application process because i didn’t think i’d get in anywhere good.

however i was just recently admitted to my “top” college which is only my top because i forced myself to settle with it because i didn’t think i was good enough to try to get into a better school and because a lot of my day-to-day problems stemmed from this process, i’ve overall been less stressed and anxious and there aren’t any major events that i’m feeling anxious or sad about.

so i met with my psychiatrist today to talk about my medicine dosages and she and my mom and i agreed to slowly start waning off of the medicine because it seems that i’m better and overall i think i am doing better but i feel really weird because for like 5 years i hated myself and my life and the idea of suicide was somewhat comforting to me that it’s a way i can get out of the suffering and now all of a sudden i got into college and i can stop taking medicine for it. i don’t really know if this is making sense to anyone but if anyone has gone through this or had the same feelings as me please let me know. there are not major stressors in my life for me to talk about with anyone like my therapist or my psychiatrist so i think overall i’m doing better but part of me doesnt want to help my depression because i’ve dealt with these emotions for so long that it’s a part of me. if anyone has any advice or anything to say please do i don’t really know what i’m trying to say",9.828906967042137,6.501712382978728,9.819554999304687,68.9794117647059,61.10401891252955,12.695257961340563,40.01237658183841,10.59048541779884,4.092799860937283,1690,64,321,29,17,563,179,423,0.16,0.7040000000000001,0.136,-0.9424,2,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,7,13,25,2,2,15,0,33,4,0,2,2,71,69,37,1,9,13,2,5,3,0,0,4,2,0,0,16,28,0,1,15,2,0,1,9,13,0,0,17,8,51,12,58,48,12,31,0,5,1,0,10,15,0,11,17,223,67,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196633333384806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879565935122224,0.0,0.055569557254004,0.24618826300802546,0.0,0.20316687849208825,0.0,0.05977669856592189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060651536177373865,0.3985271473637808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569774296655405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369384444372876,0.0,0.18769470385752615,0.07372827802090784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16342090484750807,0.0,0.0750567487081458,0.0,0.04797816967231187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836453487443432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180603395644113,0.0,0.0,0.1218543134897611,0.05809700696757113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14343432545323614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048689197568050784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200194854799688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976346927976295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427953013977259,0.10261584865755756,0.10646500346428277,0.0,0.06414263098414509,0.06428429470804986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351220764724445,0.0,0.0,0.09697580049398877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731773634179492,0.0732042404986929,0.0,0.0,0.08507532902145812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05386179086371942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05524614845383082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732452444534242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15947426115075927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950686497791221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3257462232991901,0.0,0.07172343809499783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155328116096762,0.0,0.14703152909704575,0.0,0.06612891356892832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201774548249713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05141511028584442,0.0,0.0,0.06073046317777196,0.08320910828479824,0.0,0.0,0.07945659322095629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054616393241730565,0.11677088886624895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434087561604972,0.0,0.18617963862487694,0.07136863163992316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770883963881833,0.0,0.0,0.09863586060925854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04284507437662748,0.05765841283171488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355581957868556
mentalhealth,tedddab,2020/01/22,"I can't cry.. My dad passed away 2 years ago. He's in jail for 3 years and we really don't see each other that much. But why didn't I cry and I almost don't feel anything. I just kept on telling myself that all of his pain is gone now.

Yesterday, my cousin died and we're pretty close.. But why didn't I cry? Is there something wrong with me? I don't feel sad, I mean I will surely miss him but I don't feel it right now. I didn't even felt it in his service yesterday.....

​

But I can cry when I'm pissed..

BACKGROUND OF ME:

I am adopted. I am always distant with my family members. I am always the outcast and ""the adopted"" in the family.",-0.4017857142857153,1.6072657499999998,1.898214285714289,97.03803571428574,87.92857142857143,4.928571428571429,18.035714285714285,6.322622252153567,-0.27271428571428524,495,13,118,5,16,167,80,140,0.063,0.8320000000000001,0.106,0.6454,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,1,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,3,0,15,2,1,0,2,23,25,9,1,0,5,2,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,9,0,1,5,0,0,2,8,5,0,0,6,5,24,1,10,18,3,17,0,2,1,0,8,7,1,1,8,74,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230853835191354,0.0,0.13904187394722772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231074721664658,0.15044787267191362,0.16872238405917292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426472354292105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045757574617928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6100968615272246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441081674069063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917115268193722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26179772870561924,0.0,0.21062573384919503,0.0,0.13332127996593468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125233210657202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207341007270176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775007440328772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126408169210597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895320427857457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858025913328366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11064838227612607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689632419167974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308679226505593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213642110559285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25058764515728177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15181466958146306,0.16872238405917292,0.17883439728945222
mentalhealth,HD44179,2020/01/22,"Evanston Hospital 1975 - 76 [5 South] Evanston Hospital,1975-76
I am looking for anyone who was a guest or staff at Evanston Hospital 5s unit during the years 1975-76.
If you were a guest or staff there during that time I would like to chat with you concerning that time.",4.8008823529411755,6.666232176470594,4.653088235294117,84.41139705882355,70.37254901960785,8.237254901960785,28.43627450980393,8.841846274778883,2.2442509803921564,215,8,40,4,4,66,36,51,0.0,0.946,0.054000000000000006,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,5,3,0,2,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,1,4,2,0,5,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,3,4,22,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3629133934558808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25356873113888384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43584913391314334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6052937108307678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3686994987511114,0.0,0.0,0.3342342040478718
mentalhealth,ooga-booga-tachanka,2020/01/22,"Guess who’s dark thoughts are back! It’s me! My dark thoughts about all my insecurities and how much I want to die and random thoughts about slaughtering my friends, in a gruesome manner. When I vent to my friends and in my friend group I happen to be the funny one, I crack jokes every 10 seconds basically and my friends find me hilarious, when I open up, they think it’s another joke or they don’t take me seriously, because o b v i o u s l y if you’re hilarious you’re life must be amazing! Right? No. I use comedy as a mask to hide my insecurities and cripplingly low self esteem with jokes.

Random thoughts of murder and violence are back, whenever I see a weapon, online or irl I get a small little vision for like .5 to 2 seconds of me, first person view typically, standing next to a gruesomely slaughtered and mutilated corpse of someone near me at the time or someone who caused me high stress that day, I am scared for my own safety and the safety of others, it is slowly going from random one off thoughts of “what if I shot myself at the talent show, nah that’s dumb”
To,
Urges, small little urges to stab the pencil into his eye and snap it, I cannot vent anywhere else than here about it because 100% of I tell anyone I know irl the cops will be called, I have had thoughts of shooting the school up but have no intention of violence against anyone

Anyone else experiencing this and do I need to go to a psychiatrist immediately",3.860594405594405,5.380978625874128,5.117062937062936,81.53020979020981,72.18181818181819,7.997202797202798,27.33566433566433,8.575989854853784,1.9042293706293707,1141,41,228,20,22,379,166,286,0.142,0.7440000000000001,0.114,-0.895,0,0,0,1,0,1,25.0,0,0,2,1,9,19,3,4,13,0,15,2,1,4,2,40,33,20,4,5,6,0,0,1,4,2,1,0,0,2,12,13,0,0,9,4,0,2,4,9,0,5,7,4,34,10,37,21,3,28,0,1,3,0,14,17,1,9,9,143,46,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897064451510342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379974927677742,0.11625116688609845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17448445440643065,0.0,0.13832593270516114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585334127466758,0.0,0.0,0.1165526575831066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731710477970442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775152982284665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18955926280286226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559328968366887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369859046751206,0.0965073484193082,0.0,0.0,0.3506295921548627,0.0,0.05927714159054316,0.0,0.12896163428039178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249868192664948,0.0,0.10033056752959768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987464550211027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062353570020439925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013876697487747,0.05542986595294189,0.22742951939215916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340471193667667,0.08412769690735869,0.0,0.0,0.12066390963686588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537642045473115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906718173791987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689254378141902,0.0,0.0,0.1135912880777304,0.11482559080702265,0.09041136612783396,0.0,0.11836147700087454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19226525334322148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12996579819313678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530632389181078,0.0,0.09916732531353764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269932895559139,0.0,0.5404380485538799,0.06615829385353432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979913157667954,0.0,0.0,0.06692048989329227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cherrypiemoonshine,2020/01/22,"What are we supposed to do when we're written off by healthcare? I have fmla, but took extended days off during the holiday because of mental health reasons. I was stuck in my house, I didn't leave, didn't even celebrate the ""holidays"", it was not a fucking vacation. I have PTSD, depression, anxiety. I recently switched to Zoloft sometime around the end of October/beginning of November... Now I can't sleep, I have almost no appetite, I'm crying all the time, having breakdowns at work. 

My work wants me to go through the process of filing for short term disability because of the extended time I was away. During that time I did try to schedule therapy & meds appointment but unfortunately the next available weren't until at the end of this month.

Fast forward to today... I've done everything I can to comply with the paperwork. Therapist and meds prescriber office told me I needed to have my PCP sign it. So I got in to see him today. I'm crying during the visit, I explain my issues to my PCP: and all he says is that he can't sign the paperwork because he's not in psych, and to just get out of the house and exercise. Therapist also canceled today because she was sick. 

I just got back in my car and broke down. The whole time driving home all I could think about is that it'd be easier to just kill myself.

 How can I keep ""fighting"" aka existing, if even my healthcare team is like, whatever?",5.3548995489954905,6.274118022140225,6.218198031980318,77.29678454284544,68.04059040590407,9.712259122591226,32.76773267732678,9.861636050157227,3.2630637966379665,1108,48,204,25,18,366,156,271,0.151,0.807,0.042,-0.9869,0,0,0,0,2,1,42.0,1,0,0,3,13,6,3,0,14,0,26,6,1,2,3,31,43,13,1,4,8,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,1,0,8,9,0,1,3,4,0,6,8,5,0,0,15,2,29,1,36,25,5,39,0,2,1,1,12,14,1,2,22,138,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005786002541204,0.0,0.0,0.08789408604486942,0.0,0.11908621799739935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407998702625345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784219902177804,0.0,0.0,0.1032630041808629,0.08451313908229614,0.0,0.2679977154221201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775329173983404,0.0,0.2414594721781124,0.0708821305635011,0.0,0.09466435128081556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247493664480716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19469327762720254,0.0,0.0,0.14518754810848172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877900810505988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160898205872476,0.057422849831347524,0.0,0.06246374538806637,0.0,0.17580833224096154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682799244932895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024756106050147,0.0,0.0,0.2536401656339333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471630821088274,0.0,0.09769205634757637,0.12159788364199114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637762693940006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053695923645807137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441679614861695,0.0,0.11076229316103366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772821385250892,0.0,0.0,0.08149603669383194,0.0,0.0,0.11688933334542635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847759094466984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130046267612004,0.10852175260171228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740394724440807,0.0,0.0,0.08758314184693834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10998824789334508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870268577908623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256903749512868,0.2552253456030318,0.0,0.07042516790523952,0.0,0.0,0.2563549908861152,0.0,0.31254228094640746,0.10502263821159837,0.12211280199678393,0.07462091017246891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482710094772502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122709331654354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16002993713339836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,J_D_I,2020/01/22,"I have been exploring the idea of a 'simple solution' to achieve peace of mind and mental stability. Here it is. While meditating today and trying to deal with my usual whirlwind of unpleasant thoughts in my mind, it suddenly occurred to me that there might be a simple solution to all mental peace. Right or wrong, I have been searching for a 'master key', something that could definitively restore balance to my mind (I have suffered from psychosis for the last 8 months) and I think this might be it:

The complete lack of an opinion. It suddenly appeared to me that the instability of my mind was linked to my constantly having an opinion regarding my state of mind - my dissatisfaction drove me to overthink in my quest to 'fix myself'. But then, during my meditation, I tried simply not having an opinion at all. It only took a few seconds and utterances of ""have no opinion, have no judgement"" and boom. That was it. My mind was suddenly quiet. For the next hour I wondered in amazement, stared at walls and marveled at the absolute nothingness I was experiencing. It was like my mind accepted that this was the solution I had been searching for, and it complied in the application of having no opinion. Whereas before there was a struggle to dampen the chaos and find peace, there was now peace and silence, my mind confidently allowing itself not to have an opinion on anything at all, perfectly able to sit and stare at a random part of my room, with only the faintest of thoughts coming to the surface, and even briefly at that unless I decided I wanted to think. 


Please let me know what you think, thank you.",8.305190677966102,8.206694491525425,8.040625000000002,70.25449682203393,61.711864406779654,10.90042372881356,38.77648305084746,10.411451182825502,4.156834745762712,1285,60,216,26,16,411,144,295,0.085,0.782,0.133,0.9413,0,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,0,3,6,8,0,1,21,0,28,0,0,1,4,58,41,16,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,1,0,18,14,0,0,13,0,0,5,6,3,0,1,16,5,30,5,43,19,6,35,0,1,2,0,3,15,0,12,14,174,48,1,0.09511393964435656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827066809442705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093495716467475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081932237039834,0.0997251560986786,0.1027843789094478,0.0,0.07594074131431043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805829533425693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628218600941685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693241770063886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936680713055667,0.0,0.0,0.10737206054995456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05227213378412439,0.07753055549856794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726044745292413,0.0,0.04646786651956672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19170496024831585,0.2018017184628325,0.7683037208357144,0.0,0.07591903918421015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115475385589234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14467687419560485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102999127849083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440654354948783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812267847625436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322335758488416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943374116662893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875681366637195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18283551597464395,0.0,0.15101968749492625,0.0,0.0,0.0901568934017994,0.0,0.10567508664058367,0.1291522431510915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047545669220812,0.0,0.05610066591944333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10314701025528014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039921617647143,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,benroberts37,2020/01/22,"Anyone willing to share their story about their mental health? Hey everyone. Some co-workers and I recently started a non-profit around mental health called the Overt Foundation. We know that everyone goes through hard stuff and our mission is to help people with their mental wellness and struggles around mental health.

A part we feel is really important is sharing your story and being open about it. I notice a lot of people sharing their stories on here, but would anyone be willing to share their story on our website? Could be anonymous if you want, but we are hoping to create a collection of people's stories to help create awareness and provide support to others that are struggling. Thanks :)

[https://overtfoundation.org/share/](https://overtfoundation.org/share/)",10.629677419354842,12.637957290322586,7.77435483870968,66.93153225806455,56.741935483870975,8.780645161290323,35.66129032258064,8.841846274778883,3.4702290322580644,640,25,80,8,8,182,77,124,0.046,0.68,0.27399999999999997,0.9833,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,5,2,5,0,6,10,0,2,5,0,12,3,0,0,0,23,19,8,0,5,3,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,5,12,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,14,8,16,12,3,7,0,0,0,0,20,5,0,4,2,65,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17989227047678352,0.0,0.0,0.22902879707621346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135298419650146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10270635292129282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245836752810706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504284358418616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523368225912085,0.0,0.0,0.4102060487654684,0.0,0.0,0.17244563411551214,0.0,0.0,0.12776578476916425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069565199740323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10936276439433504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5185442481403757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14645432765324706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393015737319358,0.0,0.2675425543833416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240829712212676,0.0,0.12701373591082304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09105008645880198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26895910510738746,0.14725884079669854,0.0,0.1459759929172026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184318692863374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587356527366565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566030955342528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364942827400652,0.0,0.0,0.09138019035670104,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goldrushgirl,2020/01/22,Therapist If I tell my therapist that I’m isolating from everyone and that college will be good for me bc I’ll finally be Alone would she think I’m suicidal....bc I am lol.,-1.3866666666666667,-0.16298466666666656,2.2261111111111127,87.11750000000002,117.88888888888887,8.466666666666667,23.94444444444445,8.07648339933343,2.9901777777777787,136,7,29,6,8,49,27,36,0.057999999999999996,0.778,0.16399999999999998,0.5719,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,8,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,16,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3128326506253385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886216675307516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.330880951828996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25334516409632235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640049662507053,0.0,0.0,0.7014065357570141,0.0,0.19354140919589505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21456761544793704,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,black88999,2020/01/22,"How can I improve my self-esteem? I have very low feelings of self worth and I feel bad about myself. 

These are some things I've done: 
I always try new things, made lots of friends, exercise everyday, stretch and meditate daily, write everyday in gratitude journal which includes something I like about myself, and I even got a job I really wanted.


 Yet I still don't feel good enough and probably suffer from imposter syndrome as well since I feel like I don't belong at my job.

I don't know what to do to feel better about myself.",5.224424410540916,6.278673300970873,5.500027739251041,81.8378640776699,68.41747572815535,8.604160887656034,29.277392510402212,8.841846274778883,2.2810538141470182,422,15,79,7,7,134,69,103,0.11,0.6920000000000001,0.198,0.8127,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,8,9,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,2,0,16,17,6,0,1,0,0,5,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,6,1,1,0,3,3,1,0,3,5,16,6,11,14,3,9,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,2,7,53,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14437527967315664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487466622606734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15345662161610846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17756227513798298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17928352853761567,0.0,0.11460256005859952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4386625678449296,0.12395648882063068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13405437988538962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553302445141875,0.13877281638086966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3443663324486437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953572584830601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695376881748193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751308033987248,0.0,0.16418056279362614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16757826965427766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18707450010192886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111557651397303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3620202003865804,0.0,0.0,0.14353031887559248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13357745572536706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385663275565768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305463611205309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780276547239442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431649726273795,0.10234144493211583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600747319965072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ganny_gevitoes,2020/01/22,"I feel like a walking husk of a person I don't really know how else to explain it. I've felt this way since October of last year. It's affecting my relationship with my mom (which already isn't that great to begin with), and what little friends that I have left. It's affecting my performance at school, so much to the point where I'm going to get kicked out pretty soon, probably even next month. I'm absent all the time, and I'm failing more than half of my classes. But I just don't care anymore. I don't know why, or where this change in behaviour came from, but I don't care as much as I used to. 

On top of that, if I try to explain how I feel to my parents, whether it's because I've had a bad day or I need to vent about something, they reply with something along the lines of ""well, you have a roof over your head, and food on the table, don't you? You shouldn't feel [insert emotion here]. You're better off than a lot of people,"" regardless of context. Or, I need to find the exact reason as to why I feel a certain way, or it's invalid. Most times (as of late) there isn't. Like now. Or 3-4 months ago. 

But again, I feel like a walking husk most, if not all of the time. Similar to a numbing feeling. I dunno.",2.8222822822822806,3.4375326718146764,4.236338481338482,90.3183086658087,73.63320463320463,7.299957099957101,25.58580008580009,7.3871296695380915,0.9904361218361222,938,29,217,10,18,312,140,259,0.081,0.8390000000000001,0.08,-0.2879,1,0,2,0,0,0,43.0,0,4,1,4,14,13,0,0,14,0,11,3,1,6,4,52,34,21,0,6,13,2,7,3,1,1,1,0,0,1,12,9,1,0,13,0,0,4,9,3,1,1,3,7,24,10,39,30,8,34,0,1,0,0,12,13,0,11,18,137,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035291561053795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888299439676962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582638726083448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975165310130249,0.07119538445870463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032931277137858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335790567419709,0.2381546739342968,0.0,0.12355056322356694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07532124710498976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756481904029016,0.13137540069169468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771400852422853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35432159133815233,0.16687260928671244,0.11213873825738567,0.0,0.10674587001551904,0.0,0.14122547949006226,0.0,0.09023329222465032,0.0,0.06101905553960274,0.0,0.06637564593607674,0.0,0.0,0.12876371038231435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11986239640105907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12837177536160846,0.09520115531562283,0.13174658390693916,0.0,0.12689496608556267,0.0,0.0,0.17117617238521962,0.11705637369455485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929247292513667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678550427316707,0.18644469123976148,0.0,0.17171127397075991,0.17319973508398545,0.0,0.0,0.12420973087089875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968381351267402,0.0,0.0,0.08096894156053329,0.1019783630319726,0.0,0.0,0.1104062917479757,0.0,0.0,0.11881956043392805,0.12592164500637468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482001443655206,0.12008173778950106,0.0,0.12539101479188272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819984761105976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661163788360573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17982453997246814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20430725058940105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929417428084372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087088173844666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18540827677051494,0.0,0.0,0.10501013044473922,0.0,0.21077342160236626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521028778820353
mentalhealth,aliisinwonderland21,2020/01/22,"I think I'm schizophrenic. I already posted this in another r/ but i wanted to read other points of view. 

I've never done this before so it's a bit weird to even talk about this. I'm not working rn so I figured it would be a good time for this.

I see and hear thinks that no one else does. I don't think my friends believe me, I haven't told my family. And I'm on meds for depression and anxiety.

I have drawings of some of my ""characters"" (that's how I call them) and I tend to write everything I feel, hear and see.

So, go ahead and ask me anything.",-0.6419047619047618,1.46917478151261,1.7829915966386558,96.40955742296921,91.10084033613444,5.5262745098039225,18.857703081232494,7.0316486544052195,0.2312012324929981,425,13,101,7,15,144,76,119,0.141,0.825,0.035,-0.8963,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,2,6,4,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,1,1,19,22,11,0,2,2,0,1,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,9,6,0,0,5,1,0,1,5,2,0,1,2,6,17,2,12,18,2,8,0,1,3,0,9,3,0,1,3,63,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848385914628505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17563662169570274,0.12813577729556733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783686812360424,0.0,0.15658834420134254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252875679862936,0.18871327921063785,0.0,0.0,0.1828648136658904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103454013026487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442660811753034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14657893255855914,0.17140896357122384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992337633169655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063107874118122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505367142846357,0.0,0.1579025349547224,0.0,0.08469219720614714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294088077013067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519317082664563,0.1404896668913376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775656218510184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18605290415860445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291850514581429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350121508750965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15834007854060114,0.0,0.1604171159866116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754367482860433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669489935825325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462882691307573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32197853317547576,0.0,0.0,0.0976696333532193,0.0,0.0,0.16005184892181765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879486502728943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194079180070545,0.0,0.0,0.118986020228467,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CourtM092,2020/01/22,"Psychiatric Advanced Directives, for those who aren't aware... I feel that my fellow friends who suffer from mental illness should know about Psychiatric Advanced Directives.

Today I filled one out since I’m bat shit cray. It gives me a voice when I’m unable to make a decision for myself while 5150’d (involuntarily committed). What medications I want to take and which ones I refuse to take, which hospitals I want to go to and which ones I refuse to go to, who I give permission to make decisions for me, etc.

I wish more people with severe chronic mental illnesses knew about this. I only found out about it recently.

Today some of you learned.",5.801657250470811,7.754088355932202,5.823333333333334,76.66451035781546,67.98305084745763,9.651224105461395,29.21280602636536,9.994966539143718,3.043279472693032,518,19,90,13,9,163,76,118,0.16399999999999998,0.736,0.1,-0.8709,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,2,4,3,1,0,2,0,2,5,1,2,1,22,19,4,0,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,4,1,0,0,12,5,0,2,7,0,0,5,1,2,0,3,2,2,14,1,19,16,3,12,0,1,0,0,10,2,1,1,5,59,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936066967316128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777592877035932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19034030108832325,0.13412071786729562,0.0,0.0,0.33306038541689537,0.1973185076676183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09540444685611636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317548746758317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17488085276579754,0.34989016839444703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3529017394584975,0.1320284457155227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035039727927775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17140623044463915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19611535300370225,0.178194967067049,0.14360134610875466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610468860582969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3290995764889493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20478417898179646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19962814093598566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Puffincrocz,2020/01/22,"How do you continue with life if you don't see a solution on the horizon, or at any distance? The title sums it up. If specifics would help,  reach out. Thanks for listening",1.521470588235296,4.064806735294121,2.6485294117647062,91.21338235294121,84.58823529411767,6.9294117647058835,26.14705882352941,8.07648339933343,1.8494352941176475,135,6,28,3,4,43,30,34,0.054000000000000006,0.764,0.183,0.5773,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,7,6,4,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,6,5,0,5,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,3,1,19,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689155599672863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636233150956357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38318063280937853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4322986962961917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.499456992851722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3853732560061941,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheBonerDestroyer,2020/01/22,"How do you ask for blood work / testing? So I have been struggling with depression for years, but in the last 5 months or so it has gotten REALLY bad.   In addition, I am becoming almost psychotic the day or two before my period (and I've never had pms problems before aside from cramps).  I also think I might be losing hair???

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I am just concerned that maybe my problem isn't 100% mental and I might have some sort of hormonal imbalance or vitamin deficiency that I don't know about.  I mean I probably don't, but this would all be so much easier if I just need like B12 or thyroid medication or something.  It'd be nice to maybe try this before going on ANOTHER medication.  I'm already on 3 and none of them help. 

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Except I have no idea how to ask my doctor for this.  Its like a 10 minute appointment.  She's not very nice.  I've tried to maybe find a different doctor, but they all insist on a ""new patient appointment"" before a real appointment, and they are scheduled MONTHS out.   It's all just bullshit and hoops and fucking expensive and I don't know how get them to test me to make sure there are no physical problems.   Or if its even actually worth getting tested for them.  I feel like I can't trust their judgement.  They don't give a shit.",3.393258181818183,5.491229824000001,4.606618181818182,82.27530909090909,74.75999999999998,8.065454545454546,26.56363636363637,8.841846274778883,2.1878800000000007,1016,38,192,22,22,334,146,250,0.129,0.723,0.14800000000000002,0.6282,1,0,1,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,7,2,13,16,2,1,7,0,24,12,3,4,5,53,40,25,0,7,16,0,2,3,0,3,8,0,0,0,10,10,0,0,7,0,2,1,11,9,0,1,3,2,27,7,21,30,6,16,0,2,0,1,13,6,2,13,12,129,37,6,0.0,0.0,0.07911650681575888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118387718783394,0.0,0.08946715001978156,0.06483483038245523,0.0,0.3513744822744038,0.3940550257974009,0.0,0.08501313420458115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515864492488993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676933846112568,0.0,0.08953983830605443,0.2759519333212145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052286008297368215,0.0,0.06982889787856322,0.0,0.0,0.08470505059714739,0.0,0.16596530239900914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053548597401949095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04099343894032095,0.05791926560646739,0.0,0.0,0.07410014650396668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495158563624316,0.08471561390358033,0.07777354659924593,0.04607620966922325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054342178040613004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152265205119156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911227534973062,0.06608611232649042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11882595036125485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907010427160397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054117509419926525,0.0,0.24434912194439914,0.0883133289671708,0.0,0.16334700549717995,0.08170350034928868,0.1720133558730903,0.0,0.0,0.129424950433629,0.0,0.059598701831584874,0.06011532690822453,0.06252924937183263,0.0783017525127164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874114599622103,0.2327305410853437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227993555810916,0.05193806589773806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322127266857597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062414708667562824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475612415678344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641126416580342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0519489310516434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008781754773947,0.0,0.07919749534526606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689452205399794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059022821085267414,0.0,0.0,0.05759262737173885,0.0,0.3940550257974009,0.052208983288076105
mentalhealth,Zooby06,2020/01/22,"What do I do? Please help. Tw: suicide My gf is depressed and occasionally suicidal. I try to talk her out of it and encourage her to see her campus counselor or call the hotline and stuff, but I'm honestly unequipped to help her. I'm just one guy and I don't know anything. I'm keenly under qualified to deal with this but her family won't help bc they don't believe in mental illness.  I honestly don't know what to do. Pls help. I don't know anything.",1.1579787234042556,3.382536500000004,3.5164255319148943,86.59400000000002,82.93617021276594,6.7387234042553175,25.35744680851064,7.908726449838941,1.6330629787234048,357,15,74,7,10,123,55,94,0.10400000000000001,0.63,0.266,0.9451,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,9,1,0,0,0,13,16,7,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,0,1,12,4,10,15,0,3,0,1,1,0,16,3,0,1,0,46,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.304995830439496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20878580633519375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892266645020148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19105095142967407,0.15961097285254702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469787086946256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18349033553517805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4968491938150019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3055317510468892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18675327224678664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255737953958151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20341950074309345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14767153935491495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121405876908481,0.4054076289709033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489486500397968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581627515134092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThatSeemsOddBuddy,2020/01/22,Drowning Hello and good afternoon y’all. Recently I’ve been doing so good handling my mental illnesses but a string of bad luck has put me in a rut and I can feel my mind trying to cave in. I’m not sure if the meds aren’t working anymore if if I’m just in a stressful situation but I’m really trying to grab hold before I let my depression eat me again.,3.584605263157897,3.992639828947368,5.864315789473686,80.09121052631579,71.76315789473685,9.237894736842106,28.35789473684211,9.3871,2.3620978947368423,281,10,59,6,5,100,55,76,0.225,0.6809999999999999,0.094,-0.9168,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,1,3,7,0,1,4,0,6,2,0,0,1,14,10,8,1,3,7,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,2,8,4,6,8,0,7,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,4,3,35,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22281019217560635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18758831669661816,0.0,0.0,0.19117583999595114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19350613778649006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298913557168707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359884352926335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3768815596511415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22973815507633816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24955539524182144,0.0,0.2264124062751611,0.0,0.2268505389209171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258532987058981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392801320521564,0.0,0.22183245252993194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25253613898315924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573563266612677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21174684208566066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050695204735081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16356091097607495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lovingcolfer,2020/01/22,im having trouble controlling my panic attacks is there any ways i can control my panic attacks am having panic attacks nearly everyday and am having trouble controlling them. i normally phone the samaritans but sometimes i get really nervous and i panic,8.489924242424241,10.378439659090908,9.43909090909091,53.51196969696972,61.5,11.321212121212122,44.21212121212121,11.20814326018867,6.412948484848485,211,13,22,6,3,72,28,44,0.44799999999999995,0.552,0.0,-0.9614,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,1,3,1,10,3,5,1,0,7,0,0,3,0,7,8,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,10,0,0,0,0,7,0,1,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09629083062693958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4832611628970458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4764393017221811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397859986885279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15294908208688593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13873501780701866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6645343868145461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071067818463828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14004307552723813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239312537931112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashsci,2020/01/22,"What should I be telling my therapist? For those who have benefited from Therapy, what did you tell your therapist that subsequently led to more productive therapy sessions? 
I want to get the most out of Therapy but most of the time when I see my therapist, I'm not sure what I should tell them. I am open and honest with my therapist but still feel as if there is something I am overlooking that is hindering the quality of our sessions?",8.86319277108434,7.638696975903617,8.851897590361444,68.5568825301205,61.168674698795186,14.565060240963858,41.231927710843365,13.427899808715575,5.6813879518072286,351,17,66,13,4,115,55,83,0.03,0.895,0.075,0.5715,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,1,2,1,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,9,0,0,1,1,16,14,6,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,13,3,10,10,3,6,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,3,3,53,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606637565630381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859806200359833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988024338000827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581513526828847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12014061716064935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417867852675344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39447041682090417,0.0,0.5161196237747716,0.6986841509090654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772207199650027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873269987065792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spouses-breakdown,2020/01/23,"Spouse maybe had a mental breakdown and I don't know what to do I guess this is a half question/half story. But I'm concerned about my spouse's mental health and I'm not sure what to do.

I've been separated from my husband for two months now. He began a new, high-stress job at the end of September and around the same time, his grandmother (who basically raised him while his mother worked) became very ill. It's at this time that I noticed a personality change in him. Fast forward to the beginning of November--we had a fight--I'm still not sure about what--that ended in him wanting a divorce. I was totally blindsided. We were having intimacy issues (I chalked that up to stress), but otherwise, had a good marriage. Spent lots of time together, talked all the time, ate dinner together every night, went on trips together, he took me out of town for my birthday a few days earlier, wrote ""I love you!"" on my birthday card, etc. During this fight he told me that he never loved me, always knew our marriage would fail, and only did nice things for me to convince himself that he loved me. 

Since our separation--which was entirely his choice--he's essentially been gaslighting me, according to my therapist. Basically making me feel like I'm an abusive monster who doesn't deserve love or sex. I've also caught him in lies (e.g. he told me that our marriage counselor told him that his and my relationship is the ""most f\*\*ked up she's ever seen."" Turns out she said nothing of the sort and was horrified that he'd tell me that). There's much more, but hopefully, that provides some context. I truly don't know where this is coming from. I'm definitely not perfect, but therapy has taught me not to buy into his perception of me. 

I'm very concerned about his mental health. This is not the kind, supportive, fantastic man I married. I feel like he's an entirely different person. Not only do I feel this way, but his family, my family, and our friends feel this way, too. It's like everyone else sees there's something wrong except for him. His family has been trying to get him to see a mental health professional, but he's very reluctant. Currently, he refuses to see me because ""our situation is difficult,"" I'm ""so much a part of his pain,"" he's ""doing everything he can to keep it together,"" etc. He also refuses to talk about our situation with me in any capacity, which really hurts me. All of this really hurts me.

I guess I'm wondering if anyone has experienced anything similar? I just feel so lost and am in so much pain. I love him so much and just want to make things better for everyone. I feel like I'm living in a nightmare...",5.311698832774759,6.262069106090378,6.24460013868023,76.9561594244771,68.15520628683694,10.074679301976193,30.687680573211605,10.194018383442646,3.1057837281867555,2081,80,395,52,34,690,241,509,0.129,0.752,0.11900000000000001,-0.6895,3,0,1,0,3,0,95.0,7,1,0,5,20,30,1,1,20,0,31,14,0,2,8,69,84,24,0,5,17,4,6,4,1,1,6,1,0,3,27,16,2,3,11,0,2,6,10,10,0,2,26,12,65,20,50,56,16,45,0,4,4,6,72,19,0,10,24,250,92,6,0.0,0.08083982131734585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912489116959764,0.0567717220757718,0.0,0.0,0.04639783767253191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047707074939392594,0.0,0.056146384869027184,0.06073798477519344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041591566118296834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060342717207538574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217688981293961,0.058772960880685565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04400185002016286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128444212318254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569963018359368,0.0,0.1208607068379711,0.0,0.15218601287937922,0.0,0.061716741388091564,0.0574856001414906,0.13039084289851008,0.06131953237333122,0.0,0.19295976366960066,0.0,0.206990804324242,0.14622773404306913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05271330393348685,0.0,0.03564666589339729,0.0,0.0,0.05722697428331708,0.0,0.0,0.15032315216029116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175716683899652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07208733961599935,0.0,0.06776646770334106,0.0,0.0,0.14608041234104766,0.0,0.0,0.07121300881665707,0.06770643063786969,0.0606447799663181,0.0,0.07104966418752408,0.0749933892943912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13333233412560788,0.0,0.06024716874880923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744796569267786,0.0580055783687829,0.307895208504932,0.0,0.09108633879324912,0.0,0.06854487313448969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750338215183798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05445947628530487,0.0,0.20062370219390432,0.0,0.05262215920336822,0.06589567807098942,0.0,0.06402798818629309,0.0,0.06546725240537245,0.07767879704929878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378196146779316,0.14520023826528267,0.0,0.0,0.07388500461516449,0.0,0.0,0.11914929207637392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643172923757009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741807073785124,0.0,0.0,0.07325206152067197,0.0,0.0,0.06490109275175562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163108257661264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05643946381332664,0.1533837754712621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05252576624749713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448750682880903,0.0,0.15631143005379156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774250901942115,0.12860943472879202,0.0,0.0,0.10967924668092116,0.059634867980163764,0.0,0.07802543438828853,0.07921874871204587,0.09065619799141288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15913875290170024,0.0,0.0,0.19558626434776516,0.07580456676863934,0.04632279069032038,0.0742132044617813,0.06664950004091919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688874034818213,0.08048607880340948,0.10831349055574237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06324866393143949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739910860208283,0.049671286941435286,0.0,0.0,0.048467692111159616,0.0745973438064918,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,andyresponds,2020/01/23,"Online Counselling Experience Questionnaire [Approved by Moderators] Have you ever used online counselling in the form of asynchronous responses, such as email or others? If so, we are looking for your insight. If you are interested in contributing your opinion, please click on the following link to access the questionnaire: [Online Counselling Experience Questionnaire](https://forms.gle/KK12mr77LRhFFpqE9)

* Anonymous responses
* Will help with development and applications of online counselling
* Time: 5-10 Min depending on the detail you will like to provide

Thank you!",10.414814814814818,15.244825358024695,8.255419753086423,50.302388888888906,67.02469135802468,11.141234567901234,40.198765432098774,10.355215969177356,6.5673446913580245,478,26,47,16,10,142,58,81,0.0,0.851,0.149,0.8999,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,6,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,2,1,12,9,6,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,7,3,12,7,1,8,0,0,2,0,9,4,0,5,4,37,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985919877925467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6457971765138664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22125732244069016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16126891094766674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771986705456912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.362347807962005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039093268361693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924824427497814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850981597079127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,juomiconch,2020/01/23,"Tips on dealing with depression with no meds? It’s been extremely hard not being on medication for my depression, every mood I have is enhanced. Myself and others don’t want pills to control my life and me to have dependency on it as to whether or not it can make me feel happy or not. I want to go back on them more recent since college has started and things are tough, but my boyfriend tells me and insinuates he’ll break up with me because I was dry and bland while on them. Just very confused and I don’t know what to do. Any advice would help.",4.9566795366795375,5.375990819819823,5.477168597168597,84.0372972972973,68.72972972972974,8.505019305019307,29.37065637065637,8.418075326091056,1.894152123552124,435,15,91,6,7,140,76,111,0.10800000000000001,0.8190000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.4742,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,1,2,6,0,1,0,0,13,3,0,3,0,26,21,12,0,3,8,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,9,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,2,2,14,1,16,16,1,12,0,2,0,0,6,6,0,4,4,67,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21436831663575714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14918085639527984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16868394965315825,0.0,0.1337274701493614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460449681051945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22616346611528995,0.3778905111985609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18483083457531768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092135253147443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246744754318977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335261583622634,0.19651471536326726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470407958831226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205614162224749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15494931946393736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643288037463836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436734487056535,0.22099476465113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21660392751846627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146724003793469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15527301977574465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917412776666325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574137430013792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810053280472083,0.25878322710928603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15583596519468962,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pineapplehugger123,2020/01/23,My friend is having a really tough time in school and with her home life my friend has been close to ending her life quite a lot especially recently and has attempted before I’m am really worried about her but don’t know how to help because her parents don’t believe in mental illness and as far as I know they really aren’t helping with her situation I have tried to find lots of ways to help like talking to her and getting her mind off things and trying to find a solution that works even if it’s temporary but it would either not be able to happen or hasn’t helped her in the passed. If there is anything I can do to help please tell me because I’m a little unsure on how I can help but am desperate to make her feel better.,11.854966887417223,5.9211611192053,11.270119205298009,68.05087417218544,60.324503311258276,14.729006622516556,41.45827814569536,11.20814326018867,4.295764503311259,583,17,121,10,5,193,92,151,0.07,0.721,0.20800000000000002,0.9748,2,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,4,5,5,0,0,5,0,18,3,0,3,0,28,26,15,0,3,8,1,1,1,2,1,3,0,1,0,4,8,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,1,17,4,20,23,3,13,0,0,0,0,21,8,0,5,4,83,21,2,0.1307943813055276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763263141091332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15946208170858628,0.0,0.11129638502962699,0.14736047836932115,0.0,0.1156770013720833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584500000755955,0.0,0.0,0.08638845530111222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613356911951328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23908738994649334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021028290943193,0.0,0.06833466589312898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566103943340042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5260123005711859,0.0,0.13119742877144686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376234279388245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18476787913097453,0.06389952802649136,0.1310903309850006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22239341146924427,0.0,0.0,0.08730626515645531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13180997318917675,0.0,0.13206503983168316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14523168196832956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357295385791674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13911592431705389,0.0,0.0,0.25137068953759284,0.0,0.1291436723874766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323708966599504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470183646571677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512756929027517,0.114320054256748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689397515339609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626725555980525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760159867555608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381849190300016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521986734398716,0.13282804312611762,0.0,0.09291257580531846,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YouDontKnow_22,2020/01/23,"Uncomfortable /Anxious at classrooms  

So, I have quit University about three years ago and I'm afraid that I won't ever be ready to start it again.

A bit of a background; When I started University about 4 or so years ago, it was okay at first but after some time I started to get severe anxiety in the classroom and I couldn't handle it, leading me to get out of the classroom every like 10 minutes or so just so I can calm down. And later on I started skipping classes or just avoiding going to University. I don't know what led to this. I don't have any anxiety about meeting people or anything like that. It just happened and I can't do anything about it.

I also feel this anxious and uncomfortable when I'm out in a cafe or something like that, but to a lesser extent. Leading me to go home early, and getting some small relief. Could it be some sort of comfort zone thing?

I guess I wanted to know what this could be and if there's anything I can do about it.",3.4510769230769216,4.86974682564103,4.668717948717948,84.7446153846154,73.05128205128204,6.635897435897437,28.384615384615394,7.0316486544052195,1.4564461538461535,761,30,151,7,15,251,99,195,0.10400000000000001,0.7859999999999999,0.111,0.5103,0,1,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,4,18,9,0,2,6,1,17,0,0,3,1,37,34,22,0,5,11,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,16,9,0,1,3,0,0,5,5,2,0,2,1,1,16,7,25,26,5,31,0,0,0,0,1,9,0,11,20,113,32,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547649464520706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491782466059035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097721766631517,0.0,0.2198621008839016,0.3246829822696545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547616135539838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688452889151322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294674840443723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998599291956306,0.12107448716355007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265966149042656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223219596320654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22523389065317198,0.0,0.16333744539957198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15830310992508342,0.0,0.12707452636761007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441440540691302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15794887984341469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21061549244737288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962434176491004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152843950559179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234149113482724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106282302982898,0.0,0.0,0.4068498913155814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546871436491683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837933449768133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475871079838046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18507776612709076
mentalhealth,CrabsAreNeat,2020/01/23,I might have an eating disorder So I haven’t been eating anything unless I have to and when I do eat I feel miserable and I’ve thought about purging. Does this maybe sound like an eating disorder of any kind?,1.4978571428571428,4.056308309523811,2.8574285714285743,89.53757142857144,84.95238095238095,6.217142857142857,22.685714285714287,7.554174236665415,1.1951942857142863,167,6,33,3,5,54,30,42,0.193,0.674,0.133,-0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,6,4,0,0,0,6,8,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,5,2,4,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279313084929622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548106731641172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312146161532089,0.0,0.1646292717614521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7699945036195583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512154650433856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19590301969776047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190827000116876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889966375689687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19957067341763976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14935006977274534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MontyPythonsCircus,2020/01/23,"I don't know what it is I'm feeling I have this recurring dream of all my teeth falling out. They feel so realistic, and I always wake up crying, and in a cold sweat. 

Now the dreams manifest into reality, and I feel like my teeth are loose, and will fall out soon. 


For context, I am 16 years old, and female. I also have other feelings like this. I feel like someones always tugging on my hair, and my I think there are scars all over my body, even though I dont ever self harm. I scratch my skin for hours because I know theres something in it. 

I also feel as though my thoughts are not from me, like I'm not supposed to be in the body I'm in right now. I also feel like if I ever think about something I'm not supposed to think of, people are capable of reading my mind and knowing what it is that I'm thinking. 
I'm an atheist, never believed in anything, but I feel like theres a force out to get me if I ever do anything wrong, like karma, but a billion times worse.

I've also always been isolated from myself and from others, I love spending my time with my dog, since I know she's the only one who isnt going to harm me. 
I have a lot more to say, however, I know this lost is  already disorganized enough. Thank you.",3.4843488212405584,3.9082821361867737,4.906660563057908,86.8104325932708,71.99610894941634,7.29219501029984,27.17990386816205,7.048011613610866,1.1856666971847103,947,31,207,8,17,318,133,257,0.08800000000000001,0.77,0.142,0.8724,1,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,1,1,18,13,0,0,8,0,18,9,8,0,6,46,47,20,0,2,7,0,11,7,0,1,0,1,0,1,12,13,0,0,18,3,1,3,7,4,0,2,3,13,37,9,28,42,5,29,1,1,0,1,7,13,0,3,20,143,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139418381610486,0.2939123335450445,0.22935980694901525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122228137049887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056010476265324016,0.0,0.0,0.1035196642075096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041206028944358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009281740642298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10768513867457437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493877249996473,0.0,0.060687261490584336,0.2493378635124403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3716668101979468,0.3282029584097337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048004605748224814,0.0,0.052218715715406636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048536175335713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524800003432589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142226755955289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10030016769942293,0.07811487697386449,0.08292718393494666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277472988831884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086514104102827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641480930793557,0.0,0.06226168991472322,0.0698804785689883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06369948015569958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919069661175789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846681265939584,0.0,0.07306833500304505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585307062294357,0.0,0.0,0.07600582385747866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785140644582265,0.1414706614007095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459269432628076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354973624592205,0.18054739645713155,0.07294412527337492,0.10715438458054093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09363571115234877,0.0,0.10045865411381204,0.0,0.05916906090327768
mentalhealth,ifnot4themuzik,2020/01/23,"Living post-Effexor XR Has anyone taken this long term, gotten off it, and how are you ::now:: ? 

Legit wanting YOUR experience. 
🤘",1.5136956521739116,4.106860260869567,4.095978260869568,75.93788043478263,98.56521739130434,5.778260869565218,18.793478260869566,7.1686216300943375,1.3281391304347827,98,3,15,2,4,34,23,23,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,10,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33822768968947897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4731701652849285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4271328879863068,0.4280762424229107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4632692511541786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28531009834942034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,its_Gandhi_bitch,2020/01/23,"I haven't eaten in days because of my depression I have chronic depressive disorder, major depressive disorder, and seasonal affective disorder. I've had an episode starting about a week ago. I started eating less and sleeping more. Then, last night my pet leopard gecko passed away. I had to sit and watch her suffer from a respiratory infection without being able to do a thing to help. I sat in my floor for 12 hours straight next to her tank, and held her as she passed. This pushed me over the edge and I'm now in the middle of a massive episode. I can't eat or drink, I don't want to move, and everything just hurts. I even confessed to my husband that I started having some suicidal thoughts again last night. I just feel so broken right now. I've even lost weight, and I don't have any spare weight to lose. I wish I could just fade away into nothing so I don't have to hurt anymore. I'm so tired of only feeling pain. My antidepressants aren't helping anymore. I don't know what to do.",3.5423413705583755,5.285725223350255,4.306291243654826,86.11852315989849,73.41624365482234,7.564593908629442,29.063769035533,8.278499904357787,2.010553553299492,787,33,158,13,16,252,117,197,0.231,0.713,0.057,-0.9879,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,13,9,0,0,7,0,17,11,1,1,0,24,32,13,1,3,5,1,4,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,4,8,6,1,5,1,0,4,8,9,0,0,7,5,25,0,24,23,4,34,1,8,1,0,8,11,0,2,18,100,29,0,0.11284396245079675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002936409754393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673776405089723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238217773479004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21204123463723434,0.0,0.0,0.0687886321302134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009672182016668,0.0,0.0,0.07277502043267021,0.0,0.2915770185209799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.387986871933115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054412305659696,0.0,0.2309350902265491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14906474588398938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141687723007348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411459599364515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512738587642566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112857232878873,0.0,0.2416035913958439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06201609063838984,0.18396578096087549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624352961471969,0.12318251510290748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993527369376725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001083425326475,0.21179282900082935,0.0,0.10827682539003672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582291838752655,0.12007393213856307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636812736404476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292545701093022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396146122820837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343297960493707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496851448461953,0.0,0.0,0.08958550139301091,0.0,0.12969753481971885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06655829273973275,0.0,0.09051662003514248,0.2748270918491774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976498779905307,0.10877755295637742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ataloss_abcd,2020/01/23,"How do I find a doc that cares? I live in a semi-remote area and go to the pretty much one and only clinic here. They recently added mental health services and I self referred myself to one of the psychologists there. I had a nice chat with them, once, and they said after an hour of listening ""yeah, um I'm real busy but you can see this other person here, bye"". So I make another appointment and after one visit (where they act really bored/distracted/tired or whatever) and say ""yeah I'm really busy and you could see me if you really need to but we're understaffed.... yada yada, bye"" and never recommended anyone else. 

I'm not real sure what to do after being told to basically fuck off by 2 different people (and having depression et al to my list of things wrong with me).",4.241408199643492,5.437688339869284,6.030623885918003,76.59962566844919,70.83006535947713,9.485204991087343,23.05941770647653,9.800150414767053,2.0979856209150327,608,14,114,15,11,210,105,153,0.11800000000000001,0.825,0.057,-0.9096,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,3,4,0,6,6,1,0,6,2,7,3,0,2,2,26,20,15,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,5,11,0,0,2,1,0,3,2,3,1,3,3,5,16,3,17,15,1,13,0,1,2,1,17,4,1,2,8,76,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284532649845276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858919462456454,0.1591229441897284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15833844316077436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399421183567565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337594452957949,0.0,0.0,0.16225518267996186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973301173475313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14194115608046107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357211445867424,0.0,0.0,0.08826042561069923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507636986480306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529389689209287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13713252261126202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366378763972366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650561898386506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416318371809155,0.11515279526541106,0.119776739499513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653891630687248,0.3157053850805565,0.11811245634596368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766529112594728,0.13560174966812985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15799567487259242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3535302250838948,0.2984669855293796,0.0,0.15333976554143733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477256235290169,0.12350059279859273,0.0,0.0,0.24750758468639164,0.0,0.16201150666708874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463681744904924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317425182867362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14839556433458845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16979589495624245,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kboots11,2020/01/23,"How do i bounce back and feel better about life after a failed suicide attempt? I’ve been secretly dealing with depression, anxiety, and suicidal thoughts for years now, and a few days ago i had hit a major breaking point and very nearly succeeded in ended my life. I’m in the us army living in an apartment like building called ‘barracks’ where thankful my roommate pulled me out of my window on the top floor after i had consumed copious amounts  of alcohol and prescription pills. I was finally discharged from the local hospital today and have been bouncing around all over base for paperwork, tests, and meetings and such. I know a lot of people know about my failed attempt and i feel ashamed to show my face around work feeling like i’m the elephant in the room. How or what do i do to feel better about myself and less ashamed?

Before my failed suicide attempt i had been seeking behavioral health treatment for a short amount of time, but it barely feels like I’m getting anywhere even after being put on a list of antidepressants, anti anxiety, and nightmare medications. 

Anything helps, especially from those who have been in my shoes (or even better, boots)

11B",9.104071702944944,8.70266742253521,8.082944942381562,71.60062740076826,60.2206572769953,10.750149381135296,40.020913358941534,10.018931242160765,4.131144600938967,943,44,154,16,11,291,131,213,0.124,0.765,0.111,-0.4443,0,0,1,0,0,2,19.0,1,0,0,12,13,14,0,2,12,0,14,8,2,2,1,31,28,16,3,0,3,0,5,3,0,0,6,0,2,0,4,15,1,0,9,1,0,2,0,6,0,0,9,5,18,8,31,17,7,35,0,4,0,0,7,20,0,3,15,105,22,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390850311749685,0.137328633931605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19660603354366815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574548533526934,0.2287865084571851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880944113434764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934500157380336,0.0,0.0,0.34094643488329546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121402641672653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287260162672824,0.13247902801545747,0.1106778395285329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381386470703328,0.0,0.0,0.1697475758685963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248701751422306,0.18360247345020736,0.0,0.14076671262154386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713653949892856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659069782658406,0.0,0.0,0.08613160229550629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412417267179537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18152830416717108,0.1883374915751854,0.0,0.11346885670876294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924706997731634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945137479703306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08908650740647912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147510808418616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291791332156204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4216781562787958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830658070068945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201554770214576,0.0749300453648752,0.0,0.12180405100914457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545710438233409,0.0,0.0,0.106026894339731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355035693040707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827505180499125
mentalhealth,MagpieWithPebbles,2020/01/23,"How do I be okay with being alone? It's not so much that I can't be alone, I can. But after about a day of social contact that only comes from obligatory relationships (coworkers, family, people out and about) it starts to become very easy to focus on my faults and think hard about why people wouldn't want to be around me. After two or three days everything starts to seem disingenuous and I second guess everything. 

Some backstory: 

I've never been a social butterfly. I grew up 30-40 minutes from any friends I had from school so the only times I'd hang out with them was during birthdays. I was very involved in extracurricular activities, but any social bonds I made ended as soon as those activities did. Looking back now, I realize that a lot of my adult life (having the ability to choose who to be around and when) has been clinging to the few who make me a constant in their lives. I think this is an effort to make up for the lack of lasting attachments. 

Fast forward to now and I'm 23 and in the midst of a divorce from a person that took advantage of my desperation to not be lonely. Now I'm back at square one, but I can at least identify what my issue is. I just have no clue how to solve it. I desperately want to be able to feel confident that my social ties now aren't fabricated when I'm alone. I want to be able to believe people and continue to believe them when they say they love me. 

Any help or advice would be much appreciated. Thank you for taking the time to read this far 😊",4.674500000000002,5.452122116666672,5.757333333333335,80.50200000000005,69.5,9.066666666666668,26.666666666666664,9.255337874911486,2.013666666666667,1185,35,240,23,20,394,166,300,0.083,0.7879999999999999,0.129,0.9597,0,5,0,0,1,0,27.0,0,1,5,2,20,7,0,0,13,1,27,2,0,5,1,43,49,21,0,6,8,0,2,0,1,2,1,1,0,2,14,14,0,0,6,1,0,5,7,2,0,4,8,5,28,5,49,30,7,42,0,1,2,1,22,14,0,6,25,173,42,2,0.20201595829271884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870382819940304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138414119489155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20606666859215425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983703275084253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533780222617902,0.0,0.0,0.11155537717326916,0.0,0.22760280644405465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700943017688535,0.0,0.1091537417152188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302835807355528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946308876709423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18155891724930875,0.0,0.09522133325925312,0.0,0.051072669206592335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803851412735155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127167676997593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048330932610912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06770351926498422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542608753194686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233498435967335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134492283190227,0.0,0.0,0.0891918961381991,0.0,0.0848212629733371,0.0,0.0,0.08587337179071854,0.09116364479439153,0.09557619213904796,0.13484722084001438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850497359922307,0.0,0.07790358046206715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844562077662003,0.1536422394693351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21007864394829906,0.0881962713312228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103531334002397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844476842224854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032559918060947,0.0,0.10222546745475604,0.0,0.09195387062045712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41185965801982577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298793505001745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594542971995615,0.0,0.0,0.09299457634798268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294436690270945,0.0,0.0,0.11779712984978667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222358139714728,0.0,0.0,0.09867011859258623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16668432241416553,0.1787313693810672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911439903934538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175317032507361,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kakarikiloki,2020/01/23,"I want to work out tomorrow Please motivate me!! I'm probably going to be hungover/tired tomorrow, but I wanna try to care for myself and go to the gym tomorrow. Please help me stay motivated for it!!

I've been trying to go for ages, but depression, anxiety, and other things have been keeping me from going for a while now. I've finally found a reason to go, but I'm scared to have lost it tomorrow. Help me please.",2.9413425129087765,4.727396180722895,5.099345955249572,79.62168674698798,75.144578313253,9.562134251290876,26.314974182444054,9.957137785484203,2.792574526678141,325,12,64,10,7,113,48,83,0.136,0.598,0.265,0.9036,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,4,1,4,0,1,3,0,5,0,0,3,0,13,17,6,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,4,1,0,5,0,3,0,0,4,0,7,1,14,12,0,15,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,8,40,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12933048618174248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17236800245663142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145611185351448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18519703646334212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853656340331542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4804036516590297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266347944609977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15026835267685248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18454903060972616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5567315472883967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822753428033908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738219026514475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16925861677759968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18019553401027816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231599438304693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295613720519759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971600591118417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230777400490896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_craness,2020/01/23,"i need to talk to somebody i don’t know if anyone will help but i’m sick of being a burden and confiding everything in my boyfriend. it’s not fair for him to have to carry the weight of all my problems. i’ve been suicidal for a couple of months and the only thing stopping me is the fact that he would be the one to find me and i couldn’t do that to him. i need to talk to somebody but waiting lists for NHS help are months long, i can’t afford anything private, and adding the paranoia of anyone telling my parents is too big of a stress for me to push to get professional help. what do i do?",3.789862204724412,3.9103166771653584,4.816998031496066,88.80218996062996,71.20472440944881,7.609842519685039,27.686023622047248,7.1686216300943375,1.1913472440944886,466,15,106,4,8,153,75,127,0.207,0.7290000000000001,0.065,-0.9670000000000001,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,8,0,15,2,0,0,2,19,21,7,1,6,4,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,4,1,2,2,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,1,1,14,0,20,15,1,7,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,1,4,73,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26513412792545576,0.0,0.15601797854226254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097798300699444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17039297380162255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732835608747152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990539420736105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3812383602802091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419474939515007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677828644434828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30266088982661044,0.0,0.0,0.28115998149199595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847237739154138,0.14419318247405286,0.0,0.0,0.21051936707267085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18141384233029706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15850731686833106,0.21717687965958413,0.0,0.0,0.20738276541849124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047735734920874,0.16571167626559705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12595643322309266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230871856541185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13468064534219598,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sadashivji,2020/01/23,"Friend with delusional, end-of-times-alien-speaking-to-him thoughts. Hey everyone, this is my first time posting, I think anywhere.

I have a dear friend of mine who over the course of the last month has been developing what I consider a crazy delusion and I’m wondering if anyone could help me either suggest help for him or anything really. 

It started a month ago when he told me he was being contacted by an alien and the medium of communication was through drawing (he a professional artist) and he started drawing these crazy pictures that he claimed explained how to use some sort of subtle technology. After this, he started sending me videos of him “controlling” reality: in one he claims to control the hands of a clock, in which I responded, show me that same trick with four different clocks and he didn’t respond to that. Second he sent me a video of what he called “exploding bombs in the sky,” in which he faces his phone camera towards his face and behind him it looks like a bright light shines behind him. To me it looked like the camera adjusting for a change in light, but he claims he caused this. He also seems to have “discovered” a drawing technique that allows him to remote view in which he could see another friend of ours doing something, when I saw the drawing it looked like scribbles, our other friend was convinced it was real. Now he’s reading the Tibetan book of the dead and claiming he’s being communicated with and that he feels he’s supposed to write a new translation and that he worries all the communication is related to the end of the world. When I talk to him he seems totally rational and I asked him to see a therapist to get a reality check but I think he’s enjoy this episode too much. I don’t think he’ll harm himself or others at this point. 

So like, what the hell do I do? Any help is much appreciated.",9.268502124645892,7.410255189801703,8.691995396600571,72.04099592776205,60.8413597733711,11.884490084985835,38.77638101983002,10.550175099000144,3.8956913597733713,1474,59,277,27,16,469,184,353,0.069,0.805,0.126,0.9501,1,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,2,0,0,3,8,15,2,0,26,0,20,3,3,6,2,43,45,20,1,3,6,0,2,4,4,1,0,0,0,0,26,12,0,2,10,6,1,2,2,3,0,4,10,13,30,12,40,30,7,33,1,0,9,0,57,12,1,8,22,175,56,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989262015213207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011791274581266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663286060866231,0.11816497653041882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879525872909017,0.0,0.0927340216954915,0.0,0.10534965794062244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506878363556115,0.0,0.0,0.11576336418113052,0.11921076096777397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527821625357652,0.17994711234908672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773675220270248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19961925306837733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767983800248336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056979298500244586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585380164543687,0.0,0.0,0.34825513215228343,0.0,0.058875717395543085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266005924682699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091857146370514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22021798187643268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28389290028540426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17989568757266525,0.0,0.16567979216541232,0.0,0.0,0.1088364149201924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636145746543781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652819146676057,0.0,0.10792558273226692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272019589537882,0.1282655500409127,0.0721919077006673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17959820256705986,0.2051769419429364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675403693630737,0.0,0.0,0.2392870499931759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057571262138801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308414277943134,0.0,0.21662102953617474,0.0,0.08946303460515616,0.0657102705659713,0.0,0.0,0.10767983800248336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732771958126407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220717313027875,0.0,0.11444186090741745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oneofmanyrisks,2020/01/23,"What’s the best way to go about getting medication? I got a really late diagnosis for ADD (I’m talking like in October last year) and when we were talking about medication with doctor he said that he thought I waylaid coping well enough and that I didn’t need it but asked for our opinion, my mum agrees with him and because I also have anxiety I’m too anxious to speak up about it and say that I think differently. So I got ‘discharged’ from his clinic and went on with life. 

Now I’m wishing that I had said something because I’m doing A levels and so many times we get told of how we need to be doing so much more study outside of school and I just can’t do it I can’t focus on any of it and I’ve kinda reached the point of panic because I’m scared I’m gonna fail but that fear also isn’t doing anything to get me to study so I really don’t know what to do. 

I feel like medication might help but I have no idea how to go about attempting to or how to begin that kind of process or anything so if anyone has any pointers or advice or anything can you please help??

I’m 17 btw",2.695286478227654,3.6575924935064985,4.421100076394193,87.56761650114593,74.28138528138528,7.166895849248791,25.70944741532977,7.510576382923642,1.1312819455054748,850,28,189,10,17,288,127,231,0.105,0.787,0.10800000000000001,-0.6519,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,4,1,0,3,19,9,0,3,4,0,18,6,0,3,0,38,46,27,0,4,9,1,1,2,0,2,6,4,0,0,12,15,0,0,5,0,0,3,6,4,1,0,10,5,21,5,28,33,4,17,0,1,0,0,20,6,0,8,9,119,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11402064090519988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866216645033859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586959969077738,0.0,0.08926167752772507,0.13181784193628632,0.0,0.0815870113440961,0.0,0.2880588934697091,0.0,0.1090822452534823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21338543063202586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12245092643189635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121908220018733,0.0,0.11942932834406055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056405756198944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313000821259605,0.05899810151142795,0.08335789336172651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18288513422706412,0.0,0.13262653564070018,0.0,0.1866430670865808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641943780611614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172016927323987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150671080601674,0.06412556744326367,0.09511168773154374,0.1316227718740521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824161937284893,0.11401020362976046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829758775630354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3526355727049531,0.0,0.12378153301429885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577495207777368,0.17303696645150693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690159580668054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808218003019636,0.11030253476984794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949940104332188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22198326756811787,0.09279048712441616,0.11681938663989755,0.1180887664506556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982777275982895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875697043789908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07476533774238732,0.0,0.09263275147434008,0.06803841597274017,0.0,0.0,0.11149498467723958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261701743312237,0.0,0.0,0.10491144463947172,0.10816570641207658,0.0,0.0,0.134178942774754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513960710450811
mentalhealth,obsidiancanopy,2020/01/23,"How to take care of myself during a difficult emotional journey? I lost a friendship that meant dear to me a few months ago after months of an ugly fallout.

It was a really bad time. I spent the time during and after unpacking it in therapy. It rocked a lot of different parts of my life for a lot of reasons I'm still trying to figure out.

I finally reached a point this winter where I felt like myself again, and even better. I got over my social anxiety and fear of intimacy and started connecting with people better than I have in a long time. It felt great, and I didn't miss my friend anymore.

But this past week I've been missing them like crazy, so when I talked about it in therapy we uncovered that that relationship was satisfying an emotional need stemming from childhood trauma that I'd avoided talking about until now, and in order to figure out what it is I need, we have to get into it.

So, I'm finally ready to unpack my ugly past for some reprocessing, but I already feel myself becoming fragile and anxious more often. Like, if a friend responds to me in a way that isn't 100% enthusiastic, suddenly I worry they're mad at me or don't want to be my friend anymore. It kind of makes me want to isolate myself, get high or drink, but I don't want to do any of those things while going through such a fraught time. 

Any self-care experts in the building? I want to double-down on self-care during this process so I don't start adopting horrible habits that put my wellbeing at risk.",8.013252895752899,6.358930344594595,8.362471042471046,72.76554054054056,63.121621621621635,11.430115830115831,36.34555984555985,10.290406445055957,3.5733627413127405,1186,45,226,22,14,394,163,296,0.177,0.7170000000000001,0.106,-0.9619,1,1,1,0,0,0,29.0,2,0,1,3,14,22,1,3,15,0,13,2,0,3,0,39,38,20,0,7,6,0,4,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,20,13,1,1,7,2,1,3,5,10,0,0,10,4,31,12,43,27,6,47,0,3,0,0,11,16,0,7,29,154,51,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986879818634155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118772744685092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13788612359939034,0.0,0.07755675593650664,0.11453251247663525,0.20108689403015625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464952072555608,0.0,0.11196817003578943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793278260492625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336544377484398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592234347948616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931551175284684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280816306354145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696168512819456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408264672959395,0.05126165546483066,0.0,0.1946847442099515,0.222117488013888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349818495682181,0.0,0.10593555272928157,0.0,0.057617580916487235,0.0,0.08108424131273381,0.11177372961771352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711537777252304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557348433993864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716089233280534,0.14858999598856362,0.0,0.0,0.08971965229871344,0.0,0.0,0.11067014860830228,0.17238226498531706,0.0,0.0,0.06767310072564704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184388012286954,0.0,0.0,0.15034655573109346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978654814057584,0.19356069064236694,0.07028533547649722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583851665420473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191665358701307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494774062345779,0.10423731695721904,0.0,0.10884605097371927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21152653706807886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033459197319088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351703907450106,0.0,0.08096359095703741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622645365733875,0.16297360957714058,0.0,0.0,0.2318777173602837,0.0,0.06735352523063295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23646603864308124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06883154865615157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391903150367564,0.08047210869857062,0.08132231901939797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295808125059533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,niaaaah,2020/01/23,"Can anyone with eating disorder experience please help me? So, I’ll start at the beginning. I (F18) always been a shy, insecure person as long as I can remember. As a child I always felt lesser than my peers because I felt I was bigger and not as pretty. I was the tallest in my class, even taller than all the boys and I hated it. I distinctly remember being 10 and doing laps around my garden to lose weight as I wanted to be like the other girls my age. Looking back at photos from that time it’s clear that I had a distorted body image because I looked like a literal stick insect. I never really had food problems at that stage but I definitely was much more concerned about my body image that a child should be at that stage. 
From then, I’ve always had a bit of a fixation with healthy eating and I was always conscious about it, never using the vending machine in school like all my friends and feeling shame when eating unhealthy foods.
Then when I was 14, I was going on a ski trip with my school where we had to put our weight and height on a form to get the right skis. At this stage I had filled out a good bit and I was no longer stick thin, but I most certainly wasn’t over weight. When I went to put my form in the box, I was 68kg, I saw another girls form that said 54kg and that was when I really decided I needed to take proper action and I began to starve myself. It didn’t last long, my family have always been big eaters and it was impossible to skip dinner and breakfast so all I could do was skip lunch and exercise for hours every day. I barely lost any weight and quickly went back to eating healthily for the most part, but my image and my excess weight was always on my mind.
On and off from then until now I would go through these periods of restricting and doing excess cardio because I hated my body and myself and I thought that losing weight would magically fix everything in my life. As I got older age 15/16 I gained weight and I neared but didn’t reach the overweight bmi category. I really really felt insecure and I avoided social events, wouldn’t wear shorts or T-shirt’s showing my legs and arms due to past times when my brother would make fun off me for gaining weight and call me “flobby”.  

I had never told anyone of my struggles with weight and eating until I met a boy who I had an instant connection with and really felt I could trust. I told him everything and soon after, we started dating. That was in May 2018, and when I went on holiday in July it was the first time I could remember feeling better (not perfect but better) about wearing swim gear in front of people. Before this I would always wear a T-shirt and shorts in the sea/pool and I would never exercise in front of anyone Incase I looked like a red fat spluttering pig.

So, since then with his support and since I joined an amazing crossfit gym where I’ve learned to enjoy exercise rather than fear it and use it as punishment, I’ve been generally much better with bad patches here and there but with someone to talk to it’s become much more manageable. Until three months ago. 

I went through my first scary experience with this whole thing. I really really hated myself due to exam stress and just feeling a bit worthless and ofc my weight as Ive had to give up crossfit due to being in a major exam year and not having time. I began to restrict scarily low, not eating breakfast or lunch, and throwing up my dinner every day. This lasted for a week before I broke down and told my boyfriend who made me tell my parents as he thought I needed help. 
I had lost 9 lbs (went from 148-139) that week. 

I told my parents that I think I should see a counsellor but they didn’t think that would help as they don’t believe in counsellors and I have done well in ignoring food and weight (to an extent) from then until now. I had gained back some of the weight from that time , back up to 143, but over Christmas I gained another two pounds and I began to feel disgusting and out of control. I began restricting and purging again this week and seeing the same results I’ve been seeing. However , I know that if I continue the way I’m going and my parents find out they won’t let me go to college next year as they’re afraid I won’t eat and I’ll waste away to nothing. 

So 

My question is 

How can I get help with this? I’m not underweight, and my periods of restricting and purging are on and off, but I’m really scared that this will escalate and I really really don’t want to live like this anymore.",6.0084960784313735,5.761061252222222,6.488130718954247,79.97723529411766,66.47777777777777,9.592156862745098,29.20261437908497,9.168548406835145,2.2383437908496733,3557,104,705,57,51,1159,361,900,0.131,0.746,0.12300000000000001,-0.8812,4,1,0,0,0,0,70.0,3,0,3,15,32,42,5,9,34,0,68,43,9,7,11,152,132,91,0,19,19,4,21,5,1,13,7,1,1,7,37,64,30,7,21,10,0,18,19,24,1,4,59,30,108,18,113,52,22,142,0,7,8,0,39,50,0,8,75,483,145,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03397839154878123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232630309824208,0.0,0.0,0.026066603712053358,0.0803874367053014,0.0,0.0,0.038014357366377705,0.08040642489526502,0.0,0.0,0.03412299061387058,0.0,0.0,0.036013525428218965,0.11789763846219505,0.032005040878211675,0.07009922829299042,0.04233391788090902,0.06523423933583576,0.043186257631047865,0.0,0.10170278025404217,0.1255435810504988,0.1277323252333991,0.0,0.0,0.03914055091814145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042991821027954916,0.0918132905938091,0.0,0.0,0.049441044867994687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04393099955953805,0.0,0.0,0.039226236182326325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27455748080600023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025317467263046064,0.0,0.06459156000387911,0.0,0.06889941559196064,0.07499074837740627,0.03613534555529986,0.0431333779657528,0.07752584371769014,0.0,0.1472162663981285,0.0,0.03503412086070454,0.06520918159494989,0.13905110847885194,0.0,0.02961467328898139,0.0,0.04005305247443658,0.03677088318816967,0.08713826217702919,0.03215048233090844,0.030657048445749218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135326919678766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277067040383492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03774861688776198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021065884293546715,0.06249026366868037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039196359208204856,0.027074536260985063,0.09363370390730676,0.0,0.03384724701250754,0.06784400229999997,0.09656593359074772,0.08576585722500715,0.08368630087558494,0.0,0.0,0.03627001021295427,0.0255864455760088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03870369380812931,0.0,0.03059568415050115,0.0,0.08453376497698548,0.056844358016775585,0.11825387037282843,0.0,0.040765780659935635,0.0,0.0,0.03677992359497585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768714318276375,0.04150907094334056,0.036591570532977416,0.02657410243771156,0.03346941942690165,0.0,0.042076265242698835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03899672034386746,0.0,0.036677884768305316,0.0,0.07706710295025038,0.04293983722095258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455601727906417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13026569834412913,0.03273472738670275,0.0364618514590987,0.0,0.03837632601655353,0.0775866597240847,0.0916352685361608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341610776459616,0.0,0.0,0.03907394108396348,0.03247799267363564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054262193842670864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04390838352892349,0.04007220548794296,0.0,0.0,0.04349791379733422,0.0,0.0,0.028820373043975174,0.03080925321182218,0.03350325250135135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025465617641084504,0.049122308522028514,0.0,0.06086155342259846,0.11175646902977313,0.0,0.0,0.14650882885985128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037444117922798,0.0,0.0,0.06621188551157628,0.0,0.0,0.04521759689132267,0.030425607922858405,0.09224118892409848,0.5601264760190652,0.034464449079523986,0.17766753158345064,0.0,0.04279553622199202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337676751440772,0.0,0.0,0.04936821090984072
mentalhealth,kayb1217,2020/01/23,"Stepping outside actually helps so much. TW: Suicidal thoughts 

A couple hours ago, I was feeling like life isn't worth living anymore. I was having a lot of thoughts about just ending everything. I've struggled with mental illness for a long time now. I got in an argument with my boyfriend but I told him how I feel every day. He then told me to go outside and take as long as I need. I used to go outside a lot when it was warmer out and I realized I haven't really spent any time outdoors since winter started. I just didn't see the point. But today, I needed it. I needed it so bad. Feeling the coldness of the air and watching the snow fall down brought me some kind of peace I haven't felt in awhile and brought me back to thinking somewhat more clearly. I didnt know how much it would really help. Im going to try to go outside at least once a day. I don't know if this could help other people but I just felt I should share how it helped me.",1.3728061224489778,3.529519443877557,2.7411836734693904,92.8645306122449,81.60204081632655,5.348571428571429,23.57551020408163,6.508806274219699,0.5886110204081638,745,27,159,7,20,241,118,196,0.081,0.772,0.146,0.9132,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,0,12,5,0,1,10,0,13,2,0,4,1,40,40,17,1,7,7,0,5,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,11,0,2,8,6,2,0,0,15,8,23,3,19,22,8,31,0,0,2,0,9,7,0,5,17,100,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.11725059911255087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650711624300416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08170718698188563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191580705964617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092389139921774,0.1003215412443518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593125089405337,0.13294542559856495,0.0,0.15497564401690975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064186271143752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012328788396826,0.0,0.10798448265264077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182256730063783,0.08583630478443446,0.230728696730922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731396218557943,0.0,0.09609618565349487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32214025561976095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183250926137999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297843124564825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511936952197675,0.13206431999544918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486660637347325,0.058699987443497824,0.0,0.10609603656168716,0.2126607149424036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20429713432858493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108452143691525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766504558235047,0.26727259757247795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795749948820095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08329796933805615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358206896993787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539443433072286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574524428687828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939061935386093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504389883942383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256085074507,0.0,0.13142631491872284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033902671804103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698827380291437,0.0,0.19077384919189944,0.14012269204412864,0.0,0.11388963830310456,0.22961994601186894,0.0,0.08157502828407599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377237805276404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535222718474754,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,madelinemccan,2020/01/23,Why am I such a fuck up? I just lost my SO bc I’m a absolute fuck up I keep lying to her when I have no need to and now I lost the love of my life why am I like this? Why do I keep hurting her? it it because I’m an asshole just please someone help,-4.018360655737705,-2.722451770491801,-0.056901639344260964,106.33530327868857,107.68852459016394,3.0957377049180335,14.296721311475409,4.935628992294339,-1.4231127868852456,186,5,55,1,10,68,39,61,0.287,0.5479999999999999,0.16399999999999998,-0.8290000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,6,7,2,0,4,0,4,4,0,0,0,6,14,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,11,2,5,12,0,4,0,3,0,3,4,2,2,0,3,35,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12274297770877482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722953831961197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13496273511496482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21555265248569214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579437645789789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14222164558792194,0.09837095139006377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43960137706375657,0.0,0.1817290294223093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14930076847123558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22102523290985407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17060582382321754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5450695488065102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ccfc1984,2020/01/23,"Imposter syndrome worsened by new colleague I’m employed by a content writer. I started with my current employer in August and feedback I’ve received for my work has been largely positive.

I’ve been employed to conduct research and populate a  redesigned website with articles offering value to visitors. The new writer has, I’ve been told, been brought in to the company to write technical documents but, to aid the redesign, will be working on this project for the time being. 

Today, I felt threatened - the guy was talking about the need for consistent rules across materials and, as a result, a meetings been scheduled for tomorrow where I, this individual and the project manager will discuss this. Now, I want to point out that this guy’s right: consistency is important but I can’t help but feel worried. Prior to joining my current company, I’d done a similar role with a different company and was there for more than a decade. I wasn’t happy as there were no opportunities to progress but struggled to find a different role due to depression, anxiety and low self-esteem. I was told there’d be opportunities to progress in my new role, but I now feel worried this new guy will be better and get promoted ahead of me. Worse yet, I’m worried that he’ll be do much better than me that I’ll be shown up; that people will view my work as poor.

Now, this guy’s done nothing wrong and I have no right to dislike him. That said, this is hard. I really don’t want to be rude or resentful but I feel myself becoming more tense and irritable. I really, really want some progress - to feel like I have some kind of career - and I can’t help but view this new colleague as a threat.",5.944164420485173,6.966579355345916,6.5685444743935335,74.94047169811323,66.76729559748428,10.08230008984726,36.21203953279425,10.181067101454742,3.87908697214735,1337,67,239,32,21,438,154,318,0.183,0.6579999999999999,0.16,-0.8848,7,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,12,8,14,3,1,16,0,33,0,0,1,0,36,51,22,0,4,8,0,6,1,0,5,0,1,0,4,13,14,0,0,6,0,1,2,6,7,0,0,17,9,23,7,41,22,5,34,0,2,2,0,20,12,0,3,21,158,36,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520935115224166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857923744244348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17390012356561946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08467704014815025,0.0,0.0,0.20543279897211889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20121713394898866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19884049042257207,0.07023499049976885,0.09439611749141262,0.0,0.08985651028621543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05136460446621808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3893822142983546,0.0,0.1046562604843727,0.08806934257089158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13179457019886726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237809924113456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04803087773622621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227153544005764,0.07289801364156435,0.0,0.4747576463773222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433419482619501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815801425516779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293777912599872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18894591601123512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16791792092256666,0.0935183943594774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025621392506079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695866095593317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277833312658936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902044949681784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057327234491494974,0.0,0.09318944570516044,0.18788500701658334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396306916068716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21471960502881904,0.2995255691100468,0.10018957956823332,0.0,0.10749008253141172,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NotForKeeps626,2020/01/23,"A cry for help but the ones I need the most are none the wiser because they’d rather not deal with me Pushed to the limit, having no family support and that having a mental crisis or emotional break down is stupid and childish. First time mum, no family to help me through this. The only thing holding me together is my unborn child. Currently in hospital because I almost did something I regretted, seeking help because I don’t feel safe at home. Safe from myself. Feeling so broken and alone but my little girl is my anchor. Is anyone going through the same situation or been through this and made it out ok? I’d appreciate any thoughts/advice or stories you have. 

(You can look through my post history to get an idea on my family dynamics.)",6.178652482269503,6.997680198581562,6.671773049645393,75.13333333333334,66.16312056737588,9.670921985815603,32.687943262411345,9.725611199111238,3.2102113475177294,592,24,103,12,9,193,99,141,0.196,0.632,0.172,-0.7367,1,1,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,2,3,7,1,0,9,1,13,0,0,1,0,26,21,10,0,3,7,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,5,6,0,4,3,0,0,2,5,2,0,2,3,3,16,5,15,17,3,13,0,1,1,0,10,6,0,5,3,76,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594130705729298,0.0,0.0,0.16335556039159016,0.16895806395218416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093700208076394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406738195801247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983356911742008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17919550398492973,0.0,0.16818442739425488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18350426911629333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.461365847581105,0.0,0.16497133229990862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13876205727059818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523100314067535,0.0,0.09271305229512147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32803669598774243,0.0,0.16363712791331686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18415890731303236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16350354927275926,0.0,0.0,0.13699182926458575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15436173591741298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16440112923693478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209621079379575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054410729874116,0.12407108017141848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562376831693502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833699270503341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12558884921790214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18512301052907798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837926215645027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512499422056964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spoobus,2020/01/23,"What am I supposed to do when I visit my psychologist Title. I've just had my first visit and that surprisingly went quite smoothly. I don't know, however, what happens later on. Do i just answer his questions or something? No idea. Sorry for such a stupid question but I'd appreciate help. I can give some more details if asked.",2.020357142857144,4.801463793650797,3.7764880952380966,82.0133035714286,85.66666666666666,5.68968253968254,25.33531746031746,7.1686216300943375,1.5472555555555558,261,11,46,4,8,87,51,63,0.08,0.779,0.141,0.6956,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,4,2,1,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,12,11,5,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,0,3,2,1,0,1,2,1,8,1,3,9,2,7,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,5,3,33,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482497017259198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258733263394836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25473595880233235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348214865771241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779899134330698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997691572756253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459371591939924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5949446767063038,0.2824409007104914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20443031533236025,0.0,0.2972570516920877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461638398748875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-IDKman--,2020/01/23,"How do you know if you should be on meds? I am going back to my therapist for the third time because of my anxiety and depression...and because I am almost 18 I was asked if I wanted to try medication. I know there’s some really crappy side effects but how much do they actually help? Is it worth it? Can you still feel emotions normally? 

I’m just curious...what has your experience been like?",1.0684615384615377,3.623828153846155,3.6391794871794905,82.86415384615388,87.97435897435898,7.735384615384616,23.18461538461539,8.548686976883017,2.099929230769231,308,12,61,9,10,107,61,78,0.049,0.821,0.13,0.8081,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,4,1,1,6,1,0,0,1,0,11,1,0,3,0,16,18,6,0,5,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,12,1,5,14,2,6,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,4,4,44,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.23338783761675375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23948642715401885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18295845188543866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235844011957535,0.0,0.0,0.1839009928206534,0.0,0.29158215204740323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26902531920445794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339465532787747,0.0,0.0,0.12092760987331982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359214072142807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16030540192855275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26287461474271984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684258537918273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26565532306507283,0.2409307863082071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17581175793859316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23432820715652636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321344909852716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909952663919104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776857832939266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13945742002488778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16237545563814584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106408015873512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway1007652,2020/01/23,"Not sure where to post I’m 15M and I do well in school.

That’s all anyone thinks of me. Any time I succeed or get an A which I’m proud of I get told 
No surprise I expect that of you.
Everyone expects me to get top marks in every subject. Not even ones I’m good at. Whenever I get even a B which I’m still happy with I just get told I should’ve got an A. Everyone expects so much of me and it’s starting to drain me.  Whenever I bring this up I get told that at least I’m not failing. It seems as though because some people have it worse than me I’m not allowed to be upset about the ridiculous expectations I’m being held to.

Whenever someone scores higher than me they treat it like it’s the best thing ever to happen. I’m happy for them but still all I got is I can’t believe Person A beat you.

I feel so meh all the time now. Any time I get an A I get downplayed by being told well that was expected of you and anytime I get a B or lower I get told that they can’t believe I didn’t get an A.

I just needed somewhere to rant. Thanks.",-1.20014367816092,0.8006680086206899,1.5656551724137948,97.6115287356322,93.05172413793105,4.300229885057472,17.64712643678161,5.8886186174403665,-0.4467280459770113,806,23,194,7,30,278,116,232,0.077,0.784,0.138,0.8795,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,3,6,15,16,1,1,14,0,10,0,0,1,5,30,45,10,0,6,9,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,14,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,8,3,2,1,10,1,30,13,24,32,7,17,0,1,0,0,12,7,0,4,9,125,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13535944052178234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958948193128735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606688953904666,0.0,0.0,0.22425889217263548,0.10444427847053962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314693023306987,0.09002513914635768,0.08385324687035617,0.1901988587105509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0503223154209444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5719688991152116,0.0,0.0,0.08347599382126032,0.15919683943125032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800872818104906,0.2118902579521408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048622390223451474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316157779819457,0.0737957712382443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744002558336683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689973975526752,0.08690050185017767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531646333306566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007235826367915,0.0,0.09060289492255612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432634658003098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07044358637170771,0.0,0.15895996041515342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09380017477095716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162831072115248,0.0,0.0,0.06611931102564217,0.063770948760056,0.09778180653911143,0.0,0.17409970193660138,0.0,0.0,0.4754971467763773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789680234843429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142343974730224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,C_Demott,2020/01/23,Not a Choice Check out @depressionnote's Tweet: https://twitter.com/depressionnote/status/1219740439990894593?s=09,38.54333333333333,50.1632988888889,14.142222222222225,9.700000000000015,4.555555555555571,12.488888888888884,31.222222222222207,11.20814326018867,5.268688888888889,106,2,7,2,1,20,9,9,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsumodori,2020/01/23,"Do positive emotions hurt for everyone or is it a mental illness thing? Happiness is good, but if I like something a lot, it will start to hurt (mentally). Like when I find an amazing song and listen to it over and over again, I just feel so bad. I can't enjoy anything anymore because sooner or later it will hurt so much that i have to stop. I gave up learning a third language because of this. Anyone going through similar stuff?",4.578214285714285,5.815217535714287,5.462857142857146,80.83214285714288,70.07142857142857,7.980952380952381,33.04761904761905,8.344100000000001,2.6744904761904755,339,16,62,5,6,111,62,84,0.25,0.5770000000000001,0.17300000000000001,-0.8816,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,5,10,0,0,4,0,7,1,0,0,0,12,12,9,0,1,5,0,1,2,0,2,1,2,0,0,8,2,0,1,3,1,0,1,1,4,0,1,1,3,6,6,9,9,2,9,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,4,7,48,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813635607820955,0.1278709461289078,0.0,0.15049112451436553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15269357629028085,0.2229586667087057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20571055553139125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747455746255667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246745205873454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714508276253195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393247843489524,0.15338746621960886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19467459023902334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5873166787320717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17868766567513028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15547438605686215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685913988615223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344346863018207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14078665344178032,0.0,0.0,0.12944036638982154,0.0,0.0,0.15289227935233365,0.0,0.0,0.20934893143116148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214944934722836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kruler2113,2020/01/23,"I blame my church for my regression. First off, I’d like to put a disclaimer that this post is not to incite or invite negativity toward Christianity, God, or his church at large. This is just my story and a reflection of human relationships and how they can affect our mental health. Please follow the rules of the sub and be supportive of others and respectful of their beliefs.

I started working for my church in 2018 as a 19yo worship intern. It was my job 40 hours a week to work under the worship pastor (let’s call him John), creating music sets, leading musical ensembles, and managing volunteers, among other things. This was my first full time job outside of my dad’s construction company and a very different environment. John led me to believe that I had a higher calling to become a worship pastor. I had been playing music in the church since I was little and understood it well, so it made enough sense to me.

The first few months of work went well enough, I enjoyed the job. However, as time went on I started to lack a sense of encouragement or any real direction from John. John was wildly overworked at the time. The lead pastor (who we’ll call Rick) had John working easily 80 hours a week, resulting in me seeing him very infrequently. I had no set schedule and there were weeks where I truly had no clue what to do. When I led the music services, Rick would rarely say a thing, and John mostly just had “constructive” criticism for me, most compliments were surfacey formalities, true compliments were few and far between. I recall one Sunday, John’s only note for me was that my guitar was smudged and needed cleaned. I received many notes on my pitchy vocals, so I took 3 months of vocal lessons to no avail. I felt no good, that my work was never good enough, like I was stealing paychecks from my church that I loved so much. The work I started doing for God and my “higher calling for ministry” now started to feel like handcuffs. Depression and anxiety sank in more by the day. I took solace in some of the songs that I sang for the services. I sang a hand full of them frequently, finding comfort in the words and melodies, but eventually they said I sang them too frequently and needed them to be cut. Other songs because the congregation didn’t worship enough to them. I started taking medication to remedy how I felt, but it only made me sink further. Intrusive thoughts about taking my life started to surface. I knew this wasn’t me, and I knew something had to be done. So after a year and a half, I quit my job with a smile on my face, went back to working for my dad’s company; things have never been better. No medication and freedom from the depression and anxiety I felt. 

Friends, never stop encouraging those around you. Never underestimate the value of your words to others. Compliment someone today, tell them how much they mean to you. You will be glad that you did. God bless everyone.",6.34731230448384,7.213026968978107,6.5367236704900975,76.08460583941607,65.80656934306569,9.547528675703859,32.08050052137644,9.606745405546679,3.0034764754953067,2321,90,412,45,35,744,263,548,0.069,0.777,0.153,0.9887,6,0,1,0,0,0,65.0,2,5,9,15,19,31,1,0,31,0,38,7,2,11,5,69,69,34,0,4,8,2,5,3,1,3,4,7,1,1,25,21,0,1,13,7,0,12,13,4,2,5,39,13,69,27,63,22,15,73,15,2,1,1,36,23,0,6,38,297,94,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04605821412738933,0.0,0.10362538531658567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06029339401948285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520796143735286,0.0,0.0412871235873146,0.07480163799431272,0.0,0.07630767411450846,0.0,0.05990101973693224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27663655690106553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043679764659156316,0.0,0.11667021159453962,0.0,0.0,0.07076265326055804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931054023972091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799296913574504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647182030858491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03424594502030177,0.04838579140586267,0.1950921108394466,0.0,0.06190330962146112,0.17283140232706368,0.0,0.0,0.052327452349531074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361616694322932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719930280766144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133399341075291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268843328616272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925774931663918,0.04783917392090455,0.09926727467243764,0.06788250395941328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061128294564954375,0.12817411238107565,0.0,0.06866683134798793,0.0,0.07377701131082212,0.0,0.1364601925110789,0.06825515627028385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10812168608878947,0.0,0.09957758699762474,0.1004407648342765,0.20894789912756254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04589509423357098,0.10302229680573913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434638035844036,0.0,0.0,0.06486590164877826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808660554844062,0.0,0.07203839682386934,0.0,0.07709071698523992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271587004989183,0.0,0.0,0.06442602881969164,0.053861019915263784,0.0,0.0,0.05397144518048209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056026337431844944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738677571940025,0.052141287404534435,0.0,0.0,0.2876346804480693,0.0,0.0,0.05662468767283445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768583529294206,0.0,0.0,0.1018479375030237,0.0,0.059198351834293374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498891721635412,0.0,0.0,0.05376946092841738,0.11848041511401272,0.0,0.06419941184633174,0.0,0.1504993828680485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176745272606503,0.0,0.0,0.16298496258899214,0.0,0.12179346362282036,0.18835708641332627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3451539164938733,0.0,0.0,0.04811291761636853,0.0,0.0,0.04361541791729732
mentalhealth,sharaald,2020/01/23,"Life after attempted suicide | scandal with Jameela Jamil | Mandy Rose Jones (The Empowered Woman Project) Just thought I should share this with you guys, Mandy talks about attempting suicide, about living with Borderline Personality Disorder and yet being stronger for it today. She's so inspiring. 

​

[https://youtu.be/2Vt3AUU97Tk](https://youtu.be/2Vt3AUU97Tk)",13.243000000000002,18.283529300000005,7.4259999999999975,59.63300000000001,56.0,10.4,42.0,10.355215969177356,5.8852,315,16,33,8,5,81,44,50,0.235,0.629,0.136,-0.8011,1,0,0,0,0,2,26.0,0,1,0,2,5,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,3,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,19,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758987898904785,0.30941149756817143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918357525540986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521303960096869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17985745245949716,0.0,0.0,0.22484889719826515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223389702927424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5570625054428858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466735760283367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021531199241653,0.0,0.0,0.2413658455551559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30941149756817143,0.0
mentalhealth,Stupidname8444,2020/01/23,"Dealing with a lot of self-image issues [us] Good afternoon friends. After three horrible days of panic and depression, my girlfriend (of almost 2 years) and I have decided to step away from the relationship. She said that I needed to work on myself and that she was not happy. I love this woman with all my heart, cant imagine life without her and we have three dogs that I could not imagine my life without (2 are hers and 1 is mine.) We are still best friends and we live together. I still have them as a great support group, but the problem is, it's very hard for me to focus on myself with me still having feelings for her. The main problem lies with how I treat myself and how I view myself. I have never been one to go easy on myself, I have always had very negative internal dialogue and cant seem to ever break it. Because of that, I just grasped onto the relationship because it was the one positive aspect of my life and the main thing I wanted to put energy into, especially since I dont want to use that on myself. So, what is the best way to reprogram yourself to actually care about yourself and how you view yourself?  I've been trying to come up with cheesy stuff like ""love yourself as much as you love them"" or stuff like that, and it seems like good advice but then I just convince myself that its cheesy and stupid, so...",6.138636363636365,5.948415893939397,6.515666666666667,79.69600000000001,66.19696969696969,9.312727272727274,30.47878787878788,8.841846274778883,2.2859396969696957,1052,34,206,15,15,341,140,264,0.145,0.68,0.175,0.8593,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,4,2,2,3,12,23,1,1,9,0,20,7,1,4,3,53,35,24,0,6,9,0,2,3,3,0,3,1,0,1,17,22,0,0,7,0,0,4,9,5,0,4,6,5,40,18,38,28,7,24,0,1,2,3,25,8,0,5,13,166,57,1,0.0,0.0,0.10341105190126518,0.0,0.0,0.10355227528552297,0.0,0.0,0.10611325594755416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817520358046277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956193578566026,0.0,0.0,0.12919617991564133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22241713328704474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804307868866496,0.0,0.0,0.09128343480164852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846081098113241,0.0,0.0,0.0683416310371294,0.10925001357589653,0.09127146879151536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419559230791888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585557804560862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05358141824614143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374371379929026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060224970758801816,0.1777645603559681,0.0,0.11683186782148955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280661907789635,0.09492795494368726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557449666672074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060473983165964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.224548405793998,0.15531419440244182,0.0,0.09357310603477106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009157190341203,0.286925127849425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789985549673481,0.0785751221985154,0.08173029513544902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361549889291805,0.0,0.0,0.1243325035138815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20279720825079225,0.0,0.10652872585902737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22754340369147685,0.0,0.0,0.10080136477703897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929415038456741,0.11054941310448484,0.0,0.0,0.0876591554695161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538823994528324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24261969816732415,0.0,0.12025305628387492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040149938603832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194640835595327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746839170778146,0.09152371803602484,0.0,0.17487205061127434,0.12500724171114233,0.08411374299617172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20430184272210133,0.0,0.07714713730753246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06824095372522343
mentalhealth,TylerTheFox00404,2020/01/23,"Bruh, what even is this? For some reason, I'm dissassociating terribly at the moment. Usually, I at least have some feeling or concept that I'm at least somewhat real but right now... it's like... my head's in a whole different time. My surroundings are terribly unreal. I barely even noice the sensations that I'm feeling, Everything looks so foreign... yet, it's the same things I see time and time again. I don't even know what could be causing me to feel this level of unrealness. Everything looks dull, almost. I'm a bit stressed about a presentation, but I don't think it would be causing me this much trouble.",3.4125407925407965,5.7912272393162425,4.694933954933955,80.34678321678324,75.75213675213675,8.357109557109558,27.73038073038073,9.095868883498916,2.5617760683760693,485,20,91,12,11,160,75,117,0.15,0.823,0.027000000000000003,-0.9433,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,1,6,0,9,1,1,3,0,20,21,5,0,2,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,11,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,6,9,1,8,17,9,16,0,1,3,0,0,7,0,5,10,62,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705727379907058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859691613816669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3499759666528542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13600409126894286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779709580581833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33752751867021863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3061845081231962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583898439659601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17481986229790805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936154155326736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322041436286699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860884728257915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522084561919108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19388629633115625,0.0,0.17513977273249795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454709930023557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13574038513206774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951259919664221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316754350524046,0.10914816724837467,0.0,0.0,0.2979830746499884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876074612116615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19018057113285566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100594944667326,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,microphone_fan4ever,2020/01/23,"I feel abandoned and dont know what to do. [Sweden] [Södermanland]
Ive been feeling extremy bad for the last couple of months, i havent gone to school for around 2 months and whenevrt i try i get up for school i get extreme anxiety and feel like the teachers are gonna blame me or something? 

I also sleep really bad, some nights i dont sleep at all and then i also cant go to school because i fall down and sleep on the ground at like 8 in the morning. My eating habit is also really messed up, i eat once every other day or so and dont drink that much water. Sometimes i feel like taking my own life, but the only thing stopping me is when i think of my mom/brother/girlfriend and what they would feel finding me. 

I have tried contacting my medical center(?) but they have just said that since i currently live in an apartment away from my official housing (because of school) that they cant do much unless its something serious that needs imminent help, called a psyciatric help center and they said the same thing. 

I feel so lost and abandoned and i dont know what to do, i have no drive to do anything. Im just sitting alone in my apartment and going out every other day to get food. The only thing that keeps me going right now is my girlfriend.  
I would appreciate all the advice because i really feel so down and lost right now. Thanks.",4.1737800821757,5.235344840148706,4.846077088632363,85.53536881236552,70.85873605947955,7.596243396595581,26.797299941303073,7.85451343220497,1.4774044609665422,1058,34,213,13,19,340,132,269,0.121,0.8,0.079,-0.8548,1,1,3,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,4,2,12,12,0,0,10,0,22,10,3,0,2,43,48,25,0,3,7,0,7,3,1,3,2,2,0,0,14,14,5,4,11,1,0,6,8,8,0,0,6,9,35,4,27,39,7,39,0,4,0,0,11,20,0,3,15,143,49,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975350130796194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452881012812916,0.0,0.19580311572410292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06243546132473673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06716241654353189,0.07265489742575687,0.0,0.0,0.07668023666318205,0.0,0.13629068966589405,0.14925574076680345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333832002958236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030574848636684,0.0,0.10527019991167597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3826099738035396,0.0799518973958596,0.0,0.167025601437387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752877699834004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888699440814185,0.11661193630337195,0.0,0.0,0.07459488197676857,0.0,0.09868951345042366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792183657266026,0.0,0.13915152335205822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940999575710893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417306847878387,0.0,0.0,0.08815850132039194,0.0,0.0,0.07254340564917773,0.0,0.0,0.0897072404848568,0.06652734146799738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057647281774071815,0.11961930119126925,0.0,0.07206778232498676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781854256228385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221880233170953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955868226649542,0.13028906632362547,0.0,0.11999323453045285,0.0605166916299392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659040600821257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691760332256683,0.0,0.12414418741410005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685450347399796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13939799635113095,0.15526963082990505,0.0,0.0,0.33039605863672944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751299815592057,0.0,0.24502264713871585,0.0,0.0,0.12566285078591607,0.08071959301963234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823402366942412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06136452900558205,0.0,0.0,0.07514037906836787,0.0,0.0,0.16266468480442522,0.052295772187295024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082282754480194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159542981820392,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Exia_Games,2020/01/23,"I'm afraid that of gaining a bad mental health and trying to be positive (sorta?) works but is not good enough I had a lesson in school (last week) and towards the end of the day I had a mix of depression, suicidal thoughts, a panic attack and anxiety all within a couple of minutes. I'm quite young and I've only had social anxiety so I decided to try to think positively which works but my mind is slowly focusing on the worst parts of the day and today I feel horrible, and I'm trying to be friends with a girl-I suck at making any friends-all at once. 

I can handle it but it just is another reason for me to think negatively. Also i have a major problem that is I suddenly realised how little my friends are actually real friends because I have come to learn that most of them wont help me for shit and are just my friends because we (used to) play (alot). I only have one friend that I can trust but I'm slowly losing him (and I think he might have a mental problem like autism but definitely isn't autism). I also have started contemplating if it's even worth living anymore, and my answers were always a: no. I am not at all suicidal though but it's just a thought that stays in the back of my head every single bad day.

Also, I'm on mobile so sorry for the bad formatting...",3.5746279491833017,4.686138279693491,5.274648114539222,81.71279491833032,72.33333333333334,8.100100826779594,27.146803791086914,8.532816995589336,1.903140996168582,1005,35,201,17,19,343,139,261,0.256,0.599,0.14400000000000002,-0.9907,0,0,0,0,0,1,29.0,1,0,1,6,12,22,3,2,17,0,23,3,2,4,2,48,39,23,2,3,12,0,1,1,5,2,1,0,0,0,10,12,0,0,11,1,1,1,6,13,0,1,6,1,23,9,27,29,9,23,0,2,0,0,11,10,2,5,12,140,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.09728328361010746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23916672180425205,0.08295025705267173,0.0,0.0,0.06779277465791644,0.1045338978965267,0.1525255055738144,0.0,0.0988659202085726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341202792932828,0.0,0.07665563305886547,0.249711532980116,0.1215404773570632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587430563217083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103053429241472,0.0,0.1928758527930913,0.0,0.08586304868490975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829595380598651,0.10300665606447494,0.0,0.06584445645595217,0.0,0.08399331805012754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050406375446678836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3851021205189416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361543482531839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231093621101373,0.1059660523493166,0.0,0.0,0.06682025952721786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126084260922914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04870361063907154,0.09991579963147112,0.0880282991546276,0.0,0.0,0.11152786715956738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654400237148382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20092860810773716,0.10575557969904588,0.10065871341536646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616684099670708,0.0675526795866385,0.1516378236632323,0.0,0.11696500498654765,0.0,0.10795480392484487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19078017255289592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603283030233623,0.0,0.1134693062640858,0.0,0.10249815942258904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089183457189603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233058810678618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016216347999704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115950502882288,0.07056125762021245,0.10625652055633077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180898616269979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19163242145565654,0.09794514443613153,0.15828581360605432,0.0,0.0,0.0944946811969636,0.0,0.0,0.20304936619840666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610035054329797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996548897057565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451513489208548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Castoreg,2020/01/23,Looking for help If anyone out there in the Newark/Wilmington DE (US) area would be able to recommend any mental health experts? Not feeling well and need some guidance,4.921999999999997,7.895792533333335,4.043333333333333,83.885,73.66666666666666,6.666666666666668,30.0,7.793537801064563,2.2830000000000004,136,6,22,2,3,40,30,30,0.095,0.7490000000000001,0.156,0.4617,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,5,2,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,4,3,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,2,0,14,1,0,0.3367806698404233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290224041927469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23548487489302886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028642579821845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579821034662581,0.0,0.0,0.2257369839621943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828109422868377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3393957035402341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497185993543013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4051056791078593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3028062679190253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392393251451685,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nanotech23,2020/01/23,"I'm so psychologically/emotionally troubled and/or so stupid that I don't know how things could ever become better than how horrible things currently are for me Right now I have a worst case scenario internet addiction that is worsened by Adderall abuse. I have already made the switch to a non stimulant medication but I refilled my Adderall right before I did so right now I'm continuing to abuse the Adderall I have remaining just because it continues to give me the most short term emotional relief I can find.

I want to be an artist but ive been practicing as seriously as I can for five years and have learned so little. I have honestly been fired from so many jobs and have failed so many self started projects and goals that I really am convinced that I am capable of nothing good and this is due to my unstable emotions and cognitive deficits. I don't do anything well and am constantly experiencing high levels of anxiety and depression on a constant basis. I am constantly restless and never feel on the same page as anybody who talks to me.

I have tried most medication options and combinations you could reasonably try for anxiety, depression, and ADHD after 7 years of aggressively trying everything there is to take often multiple times. The only antidepressant type I haven't tried is Trintellix since it is newer but what hope do I have of that making a difference when nothing else really has? Plus now I'm being consistently told now across most of these type of posts I make (by different people in different subreddits) that pretty much I can't expect medication to change things as much as I hoped it could. Well if that's true then how can I ever expect anything to get better when I am so bad at social skills and disorganized and irrational that talk therapy doesn't help me at all? 

I am 26 years old but the past 15 years of my life have been so unnecessarily unbearable that I don't know how my life can ever improve. My mind constantly wanders to places that disturb me and often doesn't make any sense and always comes up with bad ideas that my internet addiction and Adderall abuse  is the only way I know how to cope with how my mind works. 

I start IOP tomorrow but I've already tried it 3 times and each time was so boring and didn't help anything that how can I even be optimistic about it helping the 4th time I try it? I can't really understand or be on the same page with other people when they talk anyways.

Honestly its feeling like my life is as good as being over and that anything short of choosing suicide which I genuinely don't want to do is the only other option I have other than continue to be chained to such a hopelessly lost personality.",10.238438502673796,7.987187988235295,9.994046345811057,64.69957219251339,59.31372549019608,13.821746880570409,41.02495543672015,12.40481918309499,5.053725490196079,2174,91,384,58,22,715,241,510,0.19699999999999998,0.695,0.109,-0.9951,4,0,0,0,3,2,21.0,0,1,1,7,36,29,2,2,16,0,59,8,0,13,6,81,84,53,1,10,8,0,3,1,0,0,8,0,0,2,31,24,0,0,11,1,0,1,11,15,2,1,9,4,47,14,52,66,13,58,0,5,0,0,14,18,0,11,38,277,78,8,0.0,0.2292172398571422,0.0,0.14059921890928456,0.07750002738188487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232451963241502,0.0,0.05365778574670922,0.0,0.0,0.04385291025029145,0.0,0.09866371955654636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21226699346787994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10768677045104516,0.03931026331501891,0.0712200761511662,0.05487311033001256,0.0,0.0,0.1140658226634338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682179780327529,0.055549256343263305,0.0,0.2787472193319032,0.0,0.15446124231107494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108394919062536,0.0,0.0,0.20212344364405588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387004727786195,0.2176152976869787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042592607457244885,0.17499471032254704,0.0,0.0,0.05795614805880232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521244394140095,0.04606904127984456,0.0,0.0,0.05893932998612793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033691441639546835,0.06186115606342382,0.0,0.10817613462308984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967146685178882,0.06813333967574509,0.0,0.12809893629733554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279720816964892,0.0,0.0,0.06399272412403477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631998822778252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366457888227563,0.031504759570582616,0.0646322357498219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039443807132678,0.0,0.0,0.061018517034897024,0.12913536192095199,0.13075801784005894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19488955515213646,0.0,0.0,0.13022560435349909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480973303631962,0.0,0.04973582693677993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375273021680495,0.0,0.06766754711044516,0.0,0.0,0.14713426110396102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155949107239735,0.0894133920978858,0.056306968965757175,0.0673744812146853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06176007075394915,0.06560577266552622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393476730673553,0.06630267913741425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652128997717923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06727329772901403,0.0,0.0,0.0533437518931111,0.0,0.0,0.06573568426514616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128750115866616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705375696502076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04848568867807459,0.1554949886338813,0.0,0.0,0.07374572917856635,0.0,0.12852554063646535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15040997163695508,0.0,0.0,0.06161944411553205,0.0,0.2626918776288056,0.0,0.0,0.06713253537318874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607140692794262,0.0511862407657926,0.0,0.0,0.11596189584232185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04694681040165746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16610830825234227
mentalhealth,Charlie_redmoon,2020/01/23,workings of the mind A guy where I work and have becomes friends with -bc we had some common interests-is a cross dresser.  He told me a couple years ago he resolved to not care about negative comments about his x dressing.  He was overweight by 80 lbs.  but once he made that resolution he effortlessly and quickly dropped the excess weight.  Amazing I said.,3.6229220779220768,6.4514168333333375,3.820476190476192,84.46500000000003,77.63636363636364,6.195670995670996,32.15584415584416,7.447530270364453,2.3446389610389606,285,15,50,4,7,88,56,66,0.053,0.789,0.158,0.7926,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,0,3,4,4,0,0,5,0,3,2,0,1,0,10,7,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,1,1,4,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,2,5,4,6,2,1,7,0,0,0,0,12,1,0,1,4,28,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309569150406553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877508507523771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656424086872293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28828745391018257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20129597873815105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579799464229745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465334374421689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630755993782256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774713125335629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24783741506934595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24896136630770185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172729221850533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3793588932568497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677820693255006
mentalhealth,blo0dchild,2020/01/23,"NJ, USA Seeking help for teenage female hearing voices/having thoughts telling her to hurt loved ones. Hi everyone. I'm looking for advice/resources/help/etc. in NJ, USA. I apologize in advance if my writing/grammar/etc. sucks .. just ask and I can clarify. Thanks! 

Names changed for privacy.

My friend, Laura, just asked me for some advice regarding her daughter, Kayla. Kayla is in HS but I'm unsure of her exact age .. somewhere between 14 and 16. I believe she has private insurance. 

Laura told me that Kayla confided in her about how voices/thoughts (I don't remember exactly) in her head want her (Kayla) to hurt her boyfriend and little sisters (one is 4) and that these voices/thoughts are scaring her. She hasn't acted on them. Random but may help: her grades aren't slipping; in fact she recently did well (for her) on a test (midterm?) in her weakest subject. 

But those were the only symptoms, etc. Laura and I discussed that I can remember. I am happy that Kayla reached out to her mother about this. I told Laura I'd try to get some information, etc. so Kayla can start getting the help she may need NOW instead of waiting for something possibly tragic to occur. Thanks for your patience, time, and advice!! Greatly appreciated. 😁

TLDR: 15/F/NJ with private insurance has thoughts/hears voices to hurt her BF and little sisters. Seeking information, resources, etc. to help her.",3.1426190476190463,6.109589611111115,3.9812380952380977,81.48042857142858,81.46031746031747,5.899682539682541,30.225396825396828,7.3011,2.3049958730158737,1090,55,176,16,30,348,140,252,0.102,0.75,0.14800000000000002,0.863,0,0,1,0,0,0,65.0,0,1,1,1,9,13,1,1,3,0,16,3,1,1,3,33,35,13,0,3,6,4,0,0,2,2,1,2,0,0,7,9,0,1,5,0,0,2,3,6,1,2,5,3,32,7,30,28,5,19,0,4,1,1,43,12,1,6,5,113,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881257634555633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799777698567777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108450585220502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182893481249873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5367694432744232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197930719978732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436922821010993,0.0,0.1005823893755789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612554996621087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246916969402924,0.0,0.0,0.0987891906854955,0.0,0.21698108803027724,0.0,0.3226008677349008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091407684137846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929529989233858,0.0,0.0,0.08083305959464628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868772295320174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137460191701106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045476450800406,0.07320907437551133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851721435881057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09504384759694467,0.0,0.21808467159888975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637174516635748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410464542120024,0.0,0.0,0.06813239905922344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004963986936204,0.0,0.0,0.0841343413361571,0.17724414535723873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22925595252427164,0.056129218567632214,0.0,0.0,0.18395861439957464,0.0,0.0653533346444087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056775871702334724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654812611707835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway200111222,2020/01/23,"I think I might have Borderline Personality Disorder and would like to have it diagnosed. What can I do as a underage person living in Central Europe? As the title says. I’m quite sure I have BPD but I’d rather have a psychologist diagnose it or anything else.Problem is, I’m underage and I will not tell my parents. I won’t budge about that. School therapist will tell my parents, I’m sure.  I’m not really sure what to do. Any help is appreciated",1.4554545454545469,4.061745168539325,4.138488253319714,79.80250255362616,86.07865168539325,8.180183861082739,24.94484167517876,8.841846274778883,2.520159550561799,356,15,69,11,11,125,57,89,0.021,0.769,0.21,0.9475,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,0,14,2,0,0,3,13,19,6,0,2,5,2,0,1,0,5,2,1,0,2,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,8,4,6,14,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,2,1,43,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308452030743375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684445910438092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20943943034091167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3375665290495104,0.0,0.0,0.19058547353137725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146227652700563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812420567553254,0.0,0.14683921750675674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17640993543114475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36929601559031305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.290400182752564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591193486782176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768724146796523,0.0,0.0,0.10653115631554136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224237447723167,0.0,0.16829676574046984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4701857983974239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906937382181653,0.0,0.0,0.19307826930823407,0.0,0.10655344203968364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812933506691553,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,my_ana,2020/01/23,"today only lasts for today I know that it might feel like your world has been flipped but please believe me when I say it will get better. there will be ups and downs and whether or not the downs feel like you can never get back up, they do pass. you need to keep going. today only lasts for today.",4.18565573770492,4.718149491803281,4.0919262295082,92.88739754098364,70.47540983606558,6.1000000000000005,20.16803278688525,3.1291,-0.421265573770492,233,3,51,0,4,71,46,61,0.0,0.823,0.177,0.8957,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,3,1,1,3,3,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,0,1,13,16,6,0,1,4,0,2,2,0,3,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,3,7,3,7,11,0,16,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,2,11,36,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462583221354174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19725538016209015,0.0,0.15484416944191573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770515739702068,0.2501545955622924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829443097384086,0.0,0.09950208686313944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561928629390773,0.0,0.0,0.09621947449752516,0.2854273880757125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107064027647476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857323768662424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298197165689089,0.13503260895695732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663126947244218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19218543470834465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13923076653286753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6638220617720547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Beasy95,2020/01/23,"I feel like a waste I'm at that point where at work, home, even with friends I'm just getting in people's ways and doing more harm than good. I just also feel like I'm losing my mind. I try to do one thing, my body does a different thing and then I get distracted and forget what I was doing.

Today for example, I mopped the floor, then was going to empty the bucket but brought the mop drainer section to the other side of the room without thinking.

I just don't know what do to and it's eating at me. I'm considering so many different directions to go- abandon family and friends and live in a studio apartment with no communication? Leave and hide? Idk anymore and I'm struggling to figure myself out.",2.9949765258215955,4.804192464788733,4.3982394366197175,84.60585680751177,75.05633802816901,6.986854460093897,25.21361502347418,7.793537801064563,1.3959981220657278,558,19,110,8,12,185,90,142,0.18100000000000002,0.737,0.081,-0.8891,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,7,10,0,2,8,0,7,2,1,0,0,24,21,13,0,0,5,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,5,0,7,11,1,1,5,0,0,3,3,5,0,1,3,2,11,5,18,18,2,20,0,2,0,0,2,13,0,0,5,73,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353403488197756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678395893852792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879863513301796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3536374207193705,0.0,0.0,0.14810216931667106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17317372410115928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178074822496473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595434456998323,0.0,0.1711446237393584,0.2418087180709512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615072277401205,0.0,0.1768407608774223,0.0,0.19236482156705975,0.1419496244787507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697604929055264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09300931581691999,0.0,0.0,0.1791996405395868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653632312124777,0.0,0.14944111735598972,0.0,0.0,0.18933512568929345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715817596427628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088312223306132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468071080284775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732899752693768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15998553620430064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17692532455665058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248697126261281,0.10844150293707673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041876166966607,0.0,0.0,0.11490215629337668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433402257344668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631403345900123,0.0,0.12320799093459114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheNaiveNarwhal,2020/01/23,Advice for talking to parents I finally wanna tell my mom about how I’ve been feeling these last few years and try and talk to a therapist but idk how to talk to her about this,5.768918918918921,5.0068833243243285,6.295270270270272,82.87912162162164,67.10810810810811,9.562162162162162,32.013513513513516,8.841846274778883,2.3654972972972983,141,5,30,2,2,46,29,37,0.046,0.9179999999999999,0.036000000000000004,-0.09,1,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,7,2,5,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,8,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567848419760944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13286908452038615,0.0,0.0,0.2878618240160129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21420016157013444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077638818418473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917852594892559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6336360221634048,0.2296806471153113,0.0,0.0,0.3051069631595412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17840986158431482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692212215551316
mentalhealth,Asdaisjesus,2020/01/23,"Potential schizophrenia Alright this is going to sound weird.
My friend thinks I might have schizophrenia and I'm going to get it checked out for his benefit. I don't believe I have it

The main reason for this is because due to my depression over the years I have essentially created an imaginary friend for myself. He is known as the doctor and is essentially the grim reaper in the guise of a plague doctor
I have slight doubts that he's real, but I know that it's all in my head
I have never had hallucinations of the doctor, this is focusing on the delusion aspect of schizophrenia
When I'm down and suicidal, I draw the doctor, I drink and will often have conversations with a mask that I own, even knowing he isn't real. It's just a comfort thing

Obviously I'm getting this checked out but what do you guys think
Sorry this post was rushed",4.327062937062941,6.100190181818185,5.021818181818187,81.66503496503498,71.42424242424242,7.986013986013986,27.237762237762237,8.617729084823388,1.9844265734265727,680,24,129,12,13,219,93,165,0.096,0.826,0.078,-0.5994,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,4,9,0,1,12,1,18,6,1,1,3,24,29,8,2,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,4,1,0,1,14,7,1,0,6,1,2,3,3,4,0,0,2,1,16,5,18,25,3,15,0,2,0,0,9,7,0,3,4,92,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936404967292514,0.0,0.0,0.17306820837797113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230585734696546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6289138820989534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048135531935775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145932850484417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373606202051736,0.0,0.16051194088269524,0.0,0.17460256738368427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15210010768051455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576503087031412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16884236109223197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629581392183513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184751041293785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711790804067085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3496883485450642,0.0,0.15793879982827727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17195614446726135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16802668064540868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205303867803588,0.19685683348458125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892114160465433
mentalhealth,johndoe626776,2020/01/23,"Colleague Killed In Accident A colleague was sadly killed today after being hit by a van on his way into work. I found it quite difficult to focus today and feel upset that he didn’t get to live the rest of his life. He was such a nice guy. His poor family god damn it.

I can’t help but wish I could have foreseen this and warned him. If only we could just rewind time a few seconds.",1.9467857142857168,3.659750250000002,3.4696428571428584,90.54250000000002,77.75,6.071428571428572,18.92857142857143,6.868970318607317,0.1182321428571429,300,6,64,3,7,99,63,80,0.228,0.67,0.102,-0.8337,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,2,2,7,3,1,5,0,8,1,0,0,0,12,13,4,2,4,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,6,0,1,4,1,8,1,8,5,2,8,0,1,0,0,9,3,1,1,4,42,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3492920795183841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20620854417961298,0.0,0.1106014839740227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398370493521884,0.0,0.0,0.11428258833257306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216586926752018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661676817166513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4840066600380948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15450248561126687,0.0,0.0,0.19315137087192624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16636157802583776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326568470254253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754901566399196,0.0,0.4146797652250144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736255795852529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25154013110199275,0.0,0.0,0.1592452784912098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_Am_god-me,2020/01/23,"I am an immortal god-like being: a theory I came up with last night  

My Theory of the ""god-Me""

The ultimate point I can't possibly disprove: I am an immortal being that has always existed through reincarnation. 

Conclusion: I am actually this immortal being, or I'm not,  which means I need psychiatric help and probably medication.

Set-up to how I came to this conclusion: I have been having anxiety attacks lately.  I have a psychiatrist appointment for anxiety medicine,  but the first available date is March 10th. I've had 4 attacks in the last week and a half with one being extremely bad. To deal with the stress until I can get medicine, I bought some weed yesterday (legal where I live and bought from a store). I had this thought last night while high before bed. Why am I scared? Because I've been to sleep and it's 12 hours later and I'm still going over this theory. I'm scared it wasn't me being high. 

The theory:

I am an immortal being that continues to exist physically through reincarnation. There is also a spiritual being that created all this and that is also me.  Think of it as like the base of Christianity just instead of God/Jesus having already came,  It is me and it is happening right now. This spiritual being will be referred to as the ""god-me"" from here on out. The god-me is all-knowing and all powerful. In order to reach the state of being of the god-me,  god-me realized that I needed to learn things.  So I created physical existence and placed myself in it.  This is the physical me typing this right now.  In order to actually learn things needed to later become the god-me,  god-me had to remove the all-knowing part of itself when it placed the physical existence. This is why I am not all knowing right now. Everyone and everything else that is not me was created by god-me as tools to help me to continue learning the things I need to learn so I become god-me. This includes you reading this right now. Every person I meet and interact with's only purpose it to be apart of a lesson for physical me.

god-me is so powerful in it's state of being,  that in order to reach this state it had to create existence.  It also realize that the path to being god-me will take such a long time that it injected itself into physical existence and made reincarnation. It will take eons of physical lifetimes to properly learn everything. This… reincarnation. Here's where the scary thoughts are happening.  There is no consequences to me dying because I will be reborn into the next lifetime to continue learning.  Every choice I make,  every right decision and wrong decision,  everything good and bad is something the physical me needs to learn to become god-me.  god-me realized this and that's why it created everything. I could kill myself and it's OK.  Past lifetimes may have done that.  Future lifetimes may do that.  My current lifetime doesn't want to kill myself, but I am now aware of this opportunity. I am an immortal being.

The best way I can think to explain it is like a reverse Truman Show.  Just instead of be being Truman and not in on it,  everyone else in existence is Truman. You were created by god-me so I can become god-me. This is my Theory. 

or…..

the other option is I am wrong about everything. My brain came up with this theory that I have no possible way of disproving. So,  it some sense,I believe this.  If I'm wrong, I need mental health. Or to continue the loop of god-me,  god-me knew I needed to learn this and it's just another lesson for me to learn. If I am wrong about god-me,  I am scared right now at the steps my brain is taking to rationalize my existence.  If I am god-me everything will be OK. 

I don't know what is the answer and I'm scared right now. Is this the beginning is a psychotic breakdown?

One thing that I can't get over is this is just a theory that I came up with whole high and means nothing.  But I'm not high right now. And again,  if I came up with this theory (even when high) my brain must believe some part of it.  Or I'm seriously not mentally well.",2.9590643089086552,5.116355722998732,4.836067873782298,79.8589105075533,76.26810673443457,8.89572921078639,25.92420231540308,9.480561806807415,2.5883449244670342,3162,118,601,89,72,1078,250,787,0.105,0.809,0.086,-0.9734,3,0,1,0,0,2,110.0,0,2,0,9,38,24,4,5,40,2,87,6,4,3,4,109,131,47,3,14,20,0,0,2,0,8,2,0,1,1,65,37,0,0,30,2,3,9,13,16,1,4,22,0,61,8,86,82,10,95,1,0,0,0,9,39,0,13,41,429,126,12,0.0,0.0,0.09852161702350984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05570549462554197,0.12110555532234678,0.042003071617619264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05293226272980296,0.07723351273115994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485566653253865,0.0,0.0,0.0842967160977711,0.06154379210213586,0.2230030119625796,0.04295442219611894,0.11374644740191495,0.05297522658916371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905578695730364,0.0,0.3464112916798277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04030385359522852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052042251768285336,0.0,0.0,0.052389855823869916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051658157657545264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433845796536027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03334130017688105,0.0,0.1275937222673386,0.09647084344628636,0.27220686098600505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04293792256659538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05274701579252234,0.0,0.02868872037979027,0.04233989407743618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927788837241614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05365745500991645,0.0,0.0,0.06767082456772781,0.2666723483016081,0.0,0.0,0.0497122383467645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169639799555886,0.0,0.11096907355306757,0.12344283597540474,0.056943188324506074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04932356615629501,0.0,0.04457441224589847,0.04467285811774276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047765018726567285,0.033695525446746484,0.0,0.0,0.10997416752532573,0.0,0.050852886980358905,0.10174312915050823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620098900524789,0.0,0.0,0.053685628021397765,0.09474337134714747,0.0,0.04843653831253335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841256771122385,0.0383920110291058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932897671051292,0.0481884907525592,0.0,0.04407684024093021,0.1054808773891281,0.0,0.04771953910893175,0.11381633017627385,0.0,0.0,0.0544255473887238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05049326119531791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34487442544507085,0.0,0.0,0.20215554614680936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05051605646237911,0.0,0.0,0.038861662827830594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04031307432494985,0.0,0.057824212047319974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386313238426865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414561466823782,0.06469057970126757,0.0,0.08015032865692721,0.02943506111346835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029774176373308443,0.08013671480486484,0.040491690797730316,0.0,0.04538722338424736,0.0,0.13664996409222155,0.05635867144936321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22076607577316612,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaptainSativia,2020/01/23,On and off depression How do you guys deal with on and off depression. One week I am a bit happier the next week I am back in the ground.,0.2119999999999997,2.0159415333333364,2.4700000000000024,95.165,83.66666666666666,8.0,20.0,8.841846274778883,1.086,106,3,27,3,3,36,22,30,0.213,0.69,0.098,-0.6124,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,4,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,6,3,1,10,0,2,0,0,3,6,0,0,4,20,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23229033105870694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32980654953341537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31144389567191844,0.5203833093234322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991188711156935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212785873874671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20470556016454688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4846404410223082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xsaav,2020/01/23,How do I deal with the concept of my own mortality? The thought of non-existence is weird and scary. The thought that I wont be able to experience anything anymore makes me sad and scared.,3.831261261261261,5.637461135135138,4.528108108108111,84.56531531531532,72.78378378378378,8.176576576576577,33.954954954954964,8.841846274778883,2.8206468468468464,150,8,31,3,3,48,31,37,0.273,0.727,0.0,-0.872,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,3,0,4,0,0,2,0,7,7,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,4,0,4,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,20,5,0,0.34002197443746285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372104320118986,0.0,0.0,0.27980911321220303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35054772533022904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33260673610132835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269673082509089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3404213137249356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5398789337604755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,queendingaling20,2020/01/23,I hate this so much I hate that I know what I want to do but the want to end my life is so overwhelming that I cant even do what I want to do. I'm 18 and I am torn between living and seeing what I become and just ending it all now. It's especially difficult because I didnt plan on making it to 18. I was gonna kill myself when I was 16 and I had tried when I was 12 but obviously neither of those things worked out and now I'm stuck on this stupid planet on this stupid society and I cant do it any more. I dont know what to do.,-0.25823313782991164,0.9685426048387136,2.6999120234604104,95.783504398827,82.62903225806451,6.121994134897361,17.724340175953078,6.980632752743323,-0.2476193548387093,409,8,109,5,11,146,66,124,0.237,0.731,0.033,-0.9819,0,0,0,0,0,2,5.0,0,0,0,2,8,7,5,1,1,0,15,1,0,1,2,18,28,12,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,15,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,6,1,17,0,11,21,4,10,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,6,79,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14912323490438725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367581756879912,0.2421861647307232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570036877412715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38844783465370336,0.0,0.0,0.1448375346307802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4330026389494539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24260947873941816,0.0,0.24102969812846006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15488946988929314,0.0,0.0,0.19363515948873028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14637632029657754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16120177669056032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747439984433128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568508131808355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488820329579478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3880249071296502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596441421009582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ohsopoliteindeed83,2020/01/23,Ketamine Infusions for PTSD/seizures? Any luck?,6.5614285714285705,8.504857285714287,2.632142857142856,82.42535714285714,119.0,7.114285714285713,46.35714285714285,7.1686216300943375,5.697342857142857,39,3,5,1,2,10,7,7,0.0,0.598,0.402,0.5204,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5028493670640499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8643740590990016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PointyWeiner,2020/01/23,"I have trouble staying calm when my dog has the tiniest problem TLDR: how to stay calm when reminding yourself to calm down only make it worse

I have an older dachshund who I would consider my child (I know that’s annoying to say but it’s true), he’s had a rough month. I’ve already had to take him to the vet because his inevitable back pain caught up to him.

Today I let him in from going outside and I’m not sure what he did but he had a cut on his snout and now it’s starting to swell. The vet told me to use neosporin and keep him from irritating it. I couldn’t find the neo and I I’m having so much trouble keeping him from scratching it.

I’ve been crying nonstop and trying to calm myself down, but every time I remind myself to stay calm I just get more worked up.",2.4078197262859824,3.771679239263804,3.706134969325156,90.82379896177444,75.62576687116564,5.9969797074091575,24.808400188768285,6.297961479604792,0.6395902784332232,608,20,132,4,13,199,99,163,0.171,0.765,0.064,-0.9583,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,7,13,2,0,7,0,12,1,0,3,2,22,25,12,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,8,5,0,2,2,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,7,3,21,7,19,15,2,21,0,0,0,0,14,7,0,0,9,85,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193485085191244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13482078374204834,0.0,0.10688178911182328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19259582376472048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14772619462834985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602518148374417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160461560214342,0.0,0.09964617573230088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3116892768431471,0.0,0.0,0.09635880981911217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929057569646062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703659855195192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994967736753874,0.0,0.1288904351890285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13334917093122287,0.18656740649192885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677706605480177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13943238646200326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410208714702407,0.5606471491054021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16524992640787398,0.0,0.1318291131937434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223848375161043,0.0,0.1661958354534289,0.16753885310729594,0.0,0.1190400652755391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514320119409674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276450134310247,0.0,0.17868000774199533,0.1245520217302622,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GangsterPuppy91,2020/01/23,"Tired all the time... Don't t know what it is but any help would be great. I am conoletely exhausted 24/7 and have no motivation to do anything and no matter what weather i goto sleep at 10pm-2am i always wake up at 11 30 or 12 feeling like i could sleep for another 24 hours and i can. If i goto bed at 10 or 11 and force my self to get up at 8 i feel like a zombie. 

My diet is between 1400-2300 cals a day which mainly consists of rice, bread, fish and some vegetables when we have them or when i get the motivation to cook. I dont eat a ton of junk food but i will have a bag of chips here and there or smoke a joint or have a drink and eat a couple McGangBangs lol. I dont exercise though id love to start running and get ready for hockey but again i dont got the drive or energy to do so. 

I spent months haveing a drink or 2 or getting plastered every night for close to a year but the past few months id maybe have a couple beer or some whiskey on ice but i haven't binged for about 3 months and i dont really crave to but i wonder if that would have anything to do with it. I got to a point to where everytime id drink id smoke a joint and pack a dip (dont know any other way to put it sorry) but i dont even do that anymore... maybe dip here and there or a cigar or some pipe tobacco but my nicotine intake is low... just thought id mention that to i case that would have something to do with it.

I get like this here and there but its been really bad lately. I had bloodwork done countless times but it was normally for somthing else which would always be something alkng the lines of me being dizzy and my bloodwork would always come back clear. Turns out one tine i was diagnosed with severe panick dissorder which im over with now and all the other times turned out to be a concussion. Was thinking it could have somthing to do with that as well because i had 6 or more concussions in my life, some of them being bad. Im only 19 though and i diddnt think they could effect you till a while after having them.

Anyway any advise would be awesome thank you and sorry if any of the info was wastig your time.",2.465390635189774,3.5194314390243875,3.790330637798359,91.51367386200602,74.96452328159646,6.902334681100823,22.35561497326204,7.285733465282438,0.5462734576757535,1653,41,379,18,34,543,217,451,0.063,0.807,0.13,0.9849,0,0,10,0,0,0,31.0,1,3,4,3,20,11,0,0,23,1,53,22,3,3,3,82,75,49,0,13,26,0,2,3,0,7,5,0,1,1,20,26,13,0,12,8,1,4,10,4,1,1,12,2,38,7,47,47,10,42,0,1,0,1,13,15,0,20,25,255,58,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17724545598875727,0.0,0.0,0.1931432432548996,0.07445489645353384,0.0,0.0,0.07041784531175696,0.0,0.0,0.1168620717540646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05459843492708362,0.11857235917667808,0.04328396739539305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061164489821199326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17007505959620808,0.1571312856585214,0.0,0.045792328093455716,0.0,0.0,0.07206854445868373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266273121566924,0.49930373838770203,0.2086735004009107,0.0,0.1453116104547127,0.05931553679195033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04689810947564434,0.0,0.059824745121446116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180448715679477,0.10145192184108112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08585948507929192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18548581699181524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135783132862948,0.07828322417629001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04759313107239035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992558730155618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15339509263126144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804494324296367,0.0,0.0800966928634256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050152906385834535,0.1040683173596396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408475279925795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266806137744442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002645602707922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666333492988845,0.06956978955786758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04811480165754956,0.05400247520885911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778227312043013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671226424100215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713796011579545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097519705853922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407366371852073,0.08021539927447563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421124871364934,0.0,0.0,0.10932618152479437,0.0,0.15896848928682394,0.050257679427054114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06537183161525838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099422856270717,0.1395240344780235,0.05637001058626799,0.16561426353480088,0.08160976159218986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15446602386142227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636043591579895,0.0,0.0,0.06384199055758231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700185527436451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30263933785554065,0.0,0.0,0.045724869233776735
mentalhealth,itsPinot,2020/01/23,"Help Finding Resources I will be honest I made this post without searching this forum first for similar posts and it'll probably get me some backlash but I'm at my wits end here and I just need help. My significant other is struggling with (self-diagnosed general anxiety/depression). She has signs similar to myself a few years ago when I was clinically diagnosed (ranging from intrusive thoughts, to suicidal tendencies and self harm) And I really want to get her the help she needs and deserves. I've tried being an ear to her and giving her advice and love and care but I don't think I personally can do enough.  I try to be a good friend and helper but I have too much respect for the field of mental health to try to even start suggesting things that may or may not be true to help her overcome her mind and disabling thoughts. 

I was going to say ""I think you have more control over your brain than you realize"" but I don't want to commit to that statement and everything that follows it, because I'm not a mental health professional and i realize that things that I say within that regard could just further confuse and frustrate her so I think what I would prefer to do is to see if i can find a therapist who might be able to help her get more in control of her thoughts and mental health. 

We live in Illinois and for personal reasons she can't see her primary care doctor, in person, about this issue. So we've opted to finding and paying for a therapist out of pocket. However google doesn't yield very helpful results. So I wanted to know has anyone found any mental health doctors through some online resources that they can share? NOT the doctor themselves but an online resource that helps you find trained mental health physicians in your area that you can schedule meetings with that range from services like diagnoses to scheduled therapy sessions?

​

I knew of [BetterHelp.com](https://BetterHelp.com) but I heard that that service has way too many issues with it so I want to avoid that and find better alternatives.",7.359375431331955,8.080483198412697,6.83385093167702,75.33940993788822,63.57671957671958,9.64269611226133,34.68875086266391,9.54385415503706,3.2767845410628014,1651,69,283,29,23,513,200,378,0.078,0.748,0.175,0.9901,1,1,0,0,0,0,37.0,1,6,1,4,12,17,1,3,10,0,31,15,2,5,2,80,62,30,1,10,14,0,0,1,1,6,12,6,0,4,24,22,0,4,19,0,1,2,8,5,0,1,9,8,45,12,43,41,7,23,0,0,2,1,42,10,0,8,9,199,69,8,0.06813177689666612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06657758385586877,0.060394709382709424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382075180238201,0.08278756632405067,0.046331944627914116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04763932254886629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04153249881991755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060257019994979275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760575955481384,0.0,0.0,0.13892977458210354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528311623043808,0.05439767991884482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05868179960662787,0.2074569581624377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20920728193295465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06034453174767816,0.07039833830622749,0.0,0.045000396074156485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123244791238858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31135604886171586,0.05795285462316984,0.0,0.07470297672555072,0.052638441822184266,0.0,0.10678812417935543,0.06535820863406114,0.03872085890779008,0.057145701970663085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621044642781759,0.0,0.0,0.3196710572833105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422237477775316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03744344278251075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03328574472272978,0.0,0.06016160723177304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061491588691409485,0.06446793465707318,0.0,0.06907492806798557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34330403173446583,0.07227704851193867,0.06879367247927261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05008469536177347,0.10103769854853507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17847011886307834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050281780872286,0.0,0.0734575789202008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04364696089385865,0.07005081398119108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836224719503386,0.0,0.0,0.10858441027150342,0.0,0.14215260458327933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048224022359791466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122612620712286,0.0,0.0745251056900912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791462462457162,0.1582124884665498,0.0905274503342206,0.13096827478442466,0.0,0.16226706138786856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13877101267662986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05621585127665237,0.1607435489884978,0.0540798332273973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06567660164025782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839885951121515,0.0,0.08278756632405067,0.04387463053340265
mentalhealth,DeadWood8,2020/01/23,"I'm losing control of myself Hello, before I start explaining my situation, I need you to know that I am not a bad person and I am trying my best to help myself. So couple years ago I was with my family on a beach, me and my sister were swimming in the sea when I suddenly felt the urge to hold her head underwater so she would drown, I almost killed her that day. I was very worried and my thoughts about drowning my little sister became stronger every day. I sometimes even held her head to the point where she would do everything to come out of the water. I felt very mad about myself. I sonetimes tried slapping myself out of it, sometimes it worked. But I fear that day when I finally do it. I dont want to do it. I'm not that person... Please help me.",2.53788211788212,4.228270350649351,4.0481818181818205,87.13842657342659,76.01298701298701,6.556643356643357,22.235764235764236,7.321109707123232,0.7634691308691308,590,16,121,7,13,196,87,154,0.145,0.763,0.092,-0.8103,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,4,8,6,2,1,6,0,11,3,2,1,0,23,23,8,3,4,3,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,8,7,1,3,5,2,0,2,3,5,0,0,7,2,32,1,16,14,1,19,0,1,0,0,14,7,0,1,10,86,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225086822455129,0.0,0.13839041051997392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11539379012612865,0.0,0.0,0.1176006328440861,0.0,0.1450355947869647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190497068727876,0.0,0.0,0.15500649387444604,0.0,0.15291906752492573,0.0,0.26738863934702184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16197296794623864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128182385375262,0.0,0.11644204654150316,0.0,0.12420800730868915,0.0,0.1302855539854071,0.155516875711898,0.0,0.0,0.2653932393422255,0.15139470711426825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836724413929623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18526920832297825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290121970107035,0.0,0.07595279256917692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851578269566409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546138835796261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024758247271584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24134717875773984,0.0,0.15170546849739286,0.13064657167581542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15534604038381933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733727387779118,0.0,0.09782084378350496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971779959791628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876616243448244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280640119508247,0.08151575099592137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061348044684418,0.14035192541891442,0.0,0.19635099039328055,0.0,0.0,0.0889982454687452
mentalhealth,anxious-wreck,2020/01/23,"Never, NEVER forget your meds. I just went through really bad abstinence syndrome because I forgot to buy my antidepressant and mood stabilizer (luckily I didn't run out of my antipsychotics) and I swear to god it was horrible. Worst part is, I ran out on Saturday and couldn't buy more until yesterday so I didn't have my meds for a total of 5 days.

Day 1: headache, dizzy and couldn't concentrate very well. Still could bare existing, though.

Day 2-3: extreme sadness, agitation, dizzy, brain fog. My eating disorder was raging and making my days very hard to deal with. Cried like a baby.

Day 4: so dizzy and sad, agitated, couldn't sleep very well at night, felt like I had been bitten by many mosquitoes and my body was itchy.

Day 5: FURY. I was so outrageously furious that if you said anything to me I'd snap. I snapped way too many times at my phone for ringing or receiving a notification, for example. I felt on edge and like I was going to slap a bitch.

Day 6: Took my meds in the end of day 5, today I feel much better. I can concentrate and was able to make myself a healthy breakfast and study for a couple of hours.

NEVER forget your meds.",2.7880761904761897,4.9832532044444475,4.269460317460318,83.53600000000002,76.95555555555555,8.019047619047619,24.49206349206349,8.841846274778883,1.9079396825396828,901,31,179,21,21,299,136,225,0.258,0.674,0.068,-0.9918,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,3,0,1,9,15,4,0,7,0,17,5,3,2,4,32,28,17,0,5,3,0,4,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,13,2,1,3,0,2,6,8,8,2,0,17,6,26,6,25,7,5,34,0,2,0,0,7,7,1,2,23,106,28,0,0.10054696582538866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274158571758458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395251661463125,0.06129249712396076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892562041004701,0.0,0.1116850123411102,0.0,0.11224366673921447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027857063050063,0.1112533052519379,0.11044612063740378,0.5187557993154458,0.10365950676352197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523553381649533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288464761690902,0.0,0.0,0.0890547678007173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05083956701960912,0.0,0.19308171012439976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571431577843051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007033194276387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990185076941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14736650603659907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342317608968642,0.20387768375325546,0.0,0.0,0.4467400493644408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391358896382545,0.0,0.2326440557050943,0.0,0.0,0.09435651618886597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888256575860444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441296095994857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564318952343864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006195796416242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029693678996598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878688341861508,0.0,0.05862974435006438,0.0,0.09530676695434084,0.0,0.11171137863466883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488853308081833,0.0,0.07980950139616731,0.0,0.0,0.1808075949643669,0.09320804465708027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gados98,2020/01/23,"I can't stop talking to myself in my head I can't sit in silence for more than a couple of seconds, before I start rambling on in my thoughts. I'm always ranting to myself about something, usually the same things a couple of times throughout the week, retelling the same stories, going through conversations I've had.  It drives me crazy

If it's not that, there is a song. Not your average annoying earworm, but the same piece of a song playing over and over. I can't focus on reading anything because as soon as I try, my mind wanders off to replay the song, and I don't realize that my eyes are just following the text without any comprehension until I hit the end of the page.

My attention span is non-existent .I can't go on like this. I'm in college and I have to study a lot, but this thing that just developed over the years is making it nearly impossible. Do you have any tips on how to stop doing this and regain any sort of control over my brain? I would be grateful for any sort of response.

Thank you for taking your time to read it. I hope you're having a great day!",4.741998689384008,5.252091784403671,5.530563564875493,83.14559633027523,69.22935779816514,8.24692005242464,30.70904325032765,8.192908349453996,2.0882676277850587,851,33,172,11,14,278,127,218,0.021,0.8640000000000001,0.11599999999999999,0.963,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,4,0,1,6,6,1,0,15,0,17,3,3,3,0,29,29,11,0,3,8,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,12,4,0,3,3,6,0,4,8,1,0,1,2,4,24,5,36,24,7,32,0,0,1,0,6,15,0,5,13,125,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643274453345954,0.0,0.0,0.4133188667080892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125040095228193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926259704921876,0.0,0.1292963890247056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16962400050849125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17042238165433374,0.0,0.3362547082584396,0.0,0.09799376272528228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458065312325485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17271087637544866,0.0,0.0,0.1675229894327597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15594228300862803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15091845351522182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423402145549447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291805885618134,0.0,0.0,0.101426338519065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342396576577985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039778448341356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11697684238872427,0.0,0.0,0.10754943716438553,0.0,0.0,0.2540703344674171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424583785662112,0.12212988851847048,0.0,0.13989312234025153,0.0,0.0,0.20189473741390312,0.0,0.0,0.12062958299344102,0.17720397193641482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316258424589236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673490381827695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188336236366527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647225999896524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793935978616004,0.0,0.0,0.09784940344580632
mentalhealth,ihateweavves,2020/01/23,"I am extremely unwell I honestly don't know what to do because I feel super sick. The mental health system has failed me deeply. The medications do not work and in fact make me worse. I just think it's crazy from the hotlines to the hospital, how everything is just really there for show and how they take a really aggressive, detached approach to mental health. I really need help. I don't want to commit suicide, but it is becoming increasingly harder to function. And it feels like no one is listening or cares. This is just not the world I want to be in.",3.8897222222222254,5.851867046296299,5.151111111111113,79.50500000000002,72.98148148148148,9.244444444444444,25.88888888888889,9.725611199111238,2.569733333333333,443,15,83,12,9,147,71,108,0.17600000000000002,0.703,0.12,-0.1269,0,0,0,0,0,2,11.0,0,0,1,3,6,6,1,0,6,0,11,4,0,3,2,22,22,7,1,3,7,0,2,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,4,1,0,2,5,2,0,1,0,3,10,4,10,21,1,6,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,57,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992264838443427,0.2172689631139101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005757777731924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17680509310443984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989416586300599,0.14054145083022146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182221400773577,0.0,0.0,0.1318616260605547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811573949786812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961106308075948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13131646628380894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19818125196309808,0.3965080826478693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458702069570358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330696764823946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3780840999010535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21518686087820016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791384500333227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605439766249146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23206877328759745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14321923492223654,0.0,0.20048111020440387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PsychologicalPie0,2020/01/23,"I started a new job 3 months ago but recently I’ve started taking sick leave due to feeling a nervous breakdown is on the horizon. How do I tell my work what I’m going through? It’s like I’m just waiting to be fired to finally have nothing to live for. To give you all some background context; I’m a 24 year old male from the UK (London). I left my last job due to being in a toxic environment which made my work life miserable. I started my new role just over 3 months ago and the work and people make this such a fantastic opportunity! Unfortunately I was hit by some health news last month and I’m starting to feel the knock on effect on my mental health.

This isn’t new to me. I have an eating disorder of nearly 11 years and have already once come close to taking my own life. I suffer from depression, anxiety and would say I eat and drink my feelings away.

I saw a therapist for a few months last year and we worked from some issues - 1 main was being emotionally/sexually abused as a child/teen for which I decided to report one person to the police. I found out in January they won’t be pursuing the investigation and that it would probably never have gone to trial even though I had evidence, a name, and even an address. 

Recently I’ve been diagnosed with pre diabetes and an under active thyroid as well as being told my drinking has damaged my liver over the years. I’m on medication and have started to go to a PT to help lose weight but of course my main issue of an eating disorder has me gripped by fear and is completely controlling my life.

It’s like I’m waiting for a valid reason to end my life. And yet I have so many issues. I don’t know how to keep working and seek help. My new job is very busy which I love! But when I have a bad day like today I can only spend the hours in bed contemplating how it will all come to an end.

I have friends who know I struggle but at the end of the day it’s not their problem. My family only add to my stress and I realise a lot of my eating disorder comes from an unhappy upbringing and a way to control my life. 

“It’s said just before you die your life flashes before your eyes. 

For me death is approaching slowly. 

An unknown timeline with distant memories along the way.”

Does anyone have any advice? How do I talk to my work and what do I say about why I’ve needed random days off here and there as sick days.",5.093092049016813,5.119713661157028,6.229709318894278,80.12475206611572,68.3801652892562,9.403134796238248,29.91279566828156,9.223106411051027,2.355489683670561,1868,64,384,33,29,628,242,484,0.171,0.74,0.08800000000000001,-0.9935,3,0,2,0,1,1,35.0,1,4,2,11,18,18,0,5,32,0,34,24,2,10,3,70,71,33,2,4,8,0,6,3,1,4,14,3,2,2,15,28,7,5,9,2,1,7,5,11,1,1,10,11,50,7,61,51,10,66,0,5,2,1,23,17,0,5,43,244,65,10,0.0,0.07468558070980748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06159658855687305,0.11175257044209327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956014349934661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04286562480945128,0.0,0.04822122363917373,0.0,0.0,0.04407519138158112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059222992228858386,0.0,0.05263117855519437,0.0,0.0,0.10727544174874053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289593328679008,0.06609047900143435,0.0,0.14139711413245892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626081635267827,0.0,0.05429152661910105,0.06397869550636384,0.06541986411781216,0.0,0.21672901066346706,0.0,0.05516191993274122,0.0,0.0,0.12349963443529585,0.0,0.25800013996817217,0.0,0.0,0.16748958486233392,0.0,0.0,0.0832673918559994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059423321198423175,0.07093134253578462,0.09561641880589516,0.0,0.0,0.06905121890643398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691140809690377,0.04870030204483265,0.0,0.0,0.06046844077072431,0.07164792341744422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400546195269367,0.0,0.0,0.08450139971456111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207628989419491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973749383989594,0.18765605889182915,0.05602796412702009,0.0,0.0,0.06928423068701753,0.15414460354649295,0.0,0.06674443911948827,0.06848717390195662,0.0,0.2671388093531992,0.09238642514875657,0.0,0.055660622584294384,0.0,0.0,0.07051948726960793,0.0,0.05358968184595975,0.056891101613615214,0.05964477255257247,0.04207602142512645,0.0639070942107229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635006320200214,0.06352395496490983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012541613892584,0.0,0.0,0.04673928660208417,0.048616096055920016,0.2435164701158176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06048330740584713,0.0,0.06614410924285084,0.06712969038859197,0.04271381179846402,0.09588116268834278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04370018884416976,0.05503929823739629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796185747634016,0.060315508098028874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648099693166189,0.12447793790187585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05996024882140461,0.10025513647387037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22308073467220602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220581227733945,0.06589735067553558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947882057377659,0.05066474725384615,0.05509493555369309,0.0,0.0,0.07318791845713732,0.0,0.0,0.06193108092259584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597493401194599,0.06023217062100895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05201006796759999,0.0,0.10006771179151663,0.0,0.07675904525225542,0.05667558995513415,0.0,0.05687883619220273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27533922139151784,0.0,0.0,0.08955580732362159,0.0,0.0,0.16236861769579503
mentalhealth,deionised_water,2020/01/23,"Mental fatigue when talking Hello,

I've noticed that I when I discuss certain topics with my partner I get mentally exhausted really fast (less than 5 minutes). 

Discussions about some topics don't affect me at all, other (like ""let's plan the holiday"") are instant killers. Some discussions which I wouldn't find tiring exhaust me as well but I can't know it it advance. 

Apart from that I don't have any significant mental-health-related worries. Has anyone experienced something similar or knows what it might be?",5.6173913043478265,8.21354139130435,6.210217391304347,71.02119565217394,69.8695652173913,8.947826086956523,35.413043478260875,9.516144504307137,4.084430434782608,416,22,61,10,8,135,73,92,0.135,0.8109999999999999,0.053,-0.7872,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,4,6,0,0,1,0,10,4,0,1,2,13,13,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,2,4,0,0,1,8,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,3,1,0,0,1,9,3,6,9,4,6,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,4,4,43,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14480695100139254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488930607483502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946239057030293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11125270616747064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263459642681351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340532359638445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21774625225421787,0.0,0.1040320505391701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6437823039959639,0.22589638976836454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424343530307261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641523959926288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639321235828802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17115363664238525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447439640954829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914592266901612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162515768471175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Thoughtful_Rambler,2020/01/23,"Social media comparisons Do many people find themselves comparing lives with people they see on social media? 

If so, how can this be navigated safely?",5.9098666666666695,9.57758932,6.539999999999999,63.01666666666665,75.8,8.133333333333335,24.333333333333336,8.841846274778883,3.0843333333333343,123,4,14,3,3,40,22,25,0.0,0.871,0.129,0.5514,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,4,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,10,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.298792620284683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886702270766402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314385384331484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4532807162849836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605073884520802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6664934044011852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bibliophile_97,2020/01/23,"handling anxiety attacks at work Can anyone give any insight into handling anxiety at work? I work for a judge so I have to be in court soon and I really need to calm down. I work full time and go to school full time, married and my husbands teenage sibling resides with us. Everything is so overwhelming right now and I really messed up at work to the point where my job may be in jeopardy. Can anyone help talk me down?",2.0778580990629187,4.5811823012048185,3.2187148594377533,88.41179384203484,81.40963855421687,6.5804551539491305,26.08969210174029,7.793537801064563,1.6926182061579644,333,14,65,6,9,107,55,83,0.142,0.7979999999999999,0.06,-0.7343,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,5,5,4,1,1,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,9,10,6,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,9,1,15,7,2,19,0,1,0,0,5,14,0,1,4,44,9,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198078602302505,0.0,0.2744419468348249,0.0,0.0,0.2508455907380181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040643472861495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16121020143771508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17207232992841814,0.1019426411515921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12023092166564335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178001476842748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13300389165494247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16956684672238273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298237486082745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15318481153081925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18153653315542184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14417439897713616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20918938402559892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157653934956509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6529337279308671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CronicNS,2020/01/23,"What is this feeling? Is there a diagnosis? Feeling unwanted and useless. 

Your confidence deplenishes, and it slowly begins to eat away at you. First you just feel shitty, like you have let someone down or have made a mistake. 

When that surpasses (even if it does surpass) the anxiety takes over. You start asking yourself, ‘are those people judging me?’ and ‘i bet they hate me’. You feel so much self hatred and you end up giving up simple social tasks to avoid embarrassment, but that often leads to more embarrassment as people begin to think you are strange and that you dont want social interaction, when deep down thats all you want, you want that recognition. Just a shred of it. It got to a point where i started hanging around people who didn’t truly enjoy my company (I was 14) and i pretended to be happy, to be contempt with my life and to be like them. I wasn’t, they were pricks (except for one guy). I felt so ugly and shitty that at one point a single compliment from another girl my age made my week, like it was great. 

Then, when you fight against that and take risks to surpass your anxiety, you start to do more things socially. For me, it was taking MDMA last summer, it opened my eyes and allowed me to understand that people dont really hate me. 

Im terrified its going to come back, that im going to do something that kicks off a domino effect which dooms me to a life of self resentment and a lack of confidence. It scares me more than any horror movie, any relationship or exam date. Because i think that it is truly the be all and end all. I thought that it is the whole purpose of life, and that if people dont like me and enjoy my company then whats the point.

Luckily, i found a group if friends that actually care and they genuinely enjoy my company. I feel apart of something again.

The worst part about the whole thing is that the one thing you want is to be normal, popular even, and you would do anything for that. In these efforts, you only push people away and then you start to hate yourself for it. If you dont tell someone, it WILL get worse, trust me. Its a form of depression which eats you up without even noticing it. I never felt sad or upset for large periods of time, as that is only one symptom of depression. Instead, i just felt tired, drained. I gave up at one point. Ive never been suicidal or anything as i value life to much to ever harm myself, but i can easily see how someone could slip into such a destructive state. 

Im 16 now, and the worst bit it that i was focusing so much on acting mature when i was younger, that i alienated myself from the TRUE reason of childhood.

I regret not giving a fuck, i regret not stepping outside my comfort zone and i regret not focusing on the things that matter, and now i have that to deal with.  I think the worst bit is that in my much improved and happier state, i still feel brief of what i once was. I still sometimes feel anxiety, and sadness but instead of suppressing it ive learnt to deal with it. Before hand, i would just hide it by acting overly careless and happy, even if i wasn’t.

Ive never been to a shrink, so i could just be spouting some bullshit. but thats how i feel so i guess thats how it is.",4.737041778975744,5.45963641037736,5.5481042228212045,82.25650943396228,69.33018867924528,8.57286612758311,28.03593890386343,8.704169506293173,1.9856278526504945,2511,82,498,40,42,821,268,636,0.213,0.621,0.166,-0.9878,1,1,2,0,1,0,77.0,0,20,4,4,37,47,9,6,24,0,49,12,3,9,8,109,97,54,1,20,23,0,12,4,1,3,6,0,0,4,57,30,2,2,19,1,1,10,14,30,0,6,21,14,76,17,71,64,22,74,1,9,2,1,44,28,2,13,38,379,133,2,0.0,0.0,0.05721384203895269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974001198819243,0.0614780432981448,0.1345540034059605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649400978874496,0.052192600744623015,0.05481057943299348,0.0,0.1101685122122508,0.04508239358781452,0.0,0.03573994120467496,0.0,0.04988930552808096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280162510952447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05977658600163398,0.0,0.0,0.05050404113963623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362161859800668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088868461473035,0.10099484150082552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05130698754866466,0.0,0.27485290477554863,0.0,0.0,0.11998503664340225,0.0,0.0,0.10385650167773557,0.0,0.0,0.1548966766339759,0.05303365356045524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23715831090740794,0.0,0.16888026980499232,0.0,0.0,0.04987014207490628,0.0,0.06428411657968923,0.04529693298705074,0.054201940325136935,0.03063144435458642,0.11248533558996976,0.0666408841307314,0.0,0.046891291201397366,0.06463912616454802,0.06458689971699266,0.058052328806455486,0.0,0.12482418399598752,0.0,0.17365319852513106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899894552749733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047790790364662286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05995253903581028,0.16564673095692936,0.1145734634944408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109531215167658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17239743510211394,0.0,0.13565583493361666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05744436885155866,0.0,0.0667499663632648,0.0,0.06243840303442545,0.1986440113734176,0.08918060912673947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348993239019804,0.0,0.24387748442794555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22169495428387412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03755949823469716,0.060280793214078074,0.0,0.06294603969525295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058698262543649626,0.0,0.04672004513471192,0.0,0.12232651235184933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929588554456138,0.14902951418737728,0.09027156092543516,0.057985980849359665,0.0,0.16599277893342987,0.0,0.0936430373846526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06413105330321983,0.0,0.0,0.06093840075544806,0.1322460484735926,0.0,0.05124468430204149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558030864640665,0.11270206641716204,0.0,0.046545198725811684,0.03418727763169027,0.0673858764929864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06103527844449325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832456878622995,0.0,0.04702897234499582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091527415997034,0.0,0.056516654375247936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05974837270424544,0.08329729452611764,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Call_Me_Blue_22,2020/01/23,"I'm tired of feeling worthless. People always seem to treat me like a child. I don't know why, but my parents don't trust me to do hardly anything (even though I've never given them a reason too), my friends don't treat me like an equal, and every romantic interest I've ever had including relationships treated me like a puppy. As if im sweet, but they'd never take me seriously.

I also feel like shit everywhere I go. I have a bit of extra weight, and I constantly work to lose it, but no matter how much weight I lose, I still feel like people treat me lesser than the other people around them.

I also don't talk much, so some people think there's something wrong with me, and think of me so.

I don't wanna live my life feeling like I'm not even worth the skin I wear.

Like, I know I'm not worthless. I have good traits.

I can play any instrument you give me.

People have always called me smart and funny.

And, if I plan to do something, it will get done.

But still, I feel so worthless sometimes. People sometimes treat me like I'm some kind of puppy. They humor me, but never really take me seriously.

And most people will say ""your image of yourself is the only one that matters"" but the way people view me has held me back so much.",3.2565789473684217,4.5078378492063536,4.566758563074352,85.94432330827068,73.28571428571428,6.892564745196324,22.78696741854637,7.273561745256523,0.7893857142857139,966,24,197,10,19,320,127,252,0.133,0.614,0.253,0.9841,1,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,0,2,4,4,17,31,1,0,9,0,18,7,3,2,4,41,39,23,0,3,10,1,9,8,1,2,2,1,0,1,4,8,2,1,11,1,1,1,11,9,0,1,4,12,39,22,14,32,9,11,0,5,1,0,14,1,1,6,16,128,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14117439621828673,0.14689065895815298,0.0,0.0,0.0600246804285351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263633345948095,0.0785764662511969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787198046728933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636485335353356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013061642441243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538541835218944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032792753777984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659922393507162,0.07984267941658556,0.07436887042212953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231525846976334,0.1891741823761822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819497161207097,0.0,0.046115936343745834,0.08467388144717426,0.05016424845803267,0.074034287276316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907001792461807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534365540652624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191664097604364,0.09701862096287893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06234568970966245,0.3449829193836888,0.0,0.07794149969648702,0.0,0.0,0.19749669839918288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19465950701579685,0.0,0.20423117421557915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059812096860468365,0.06713113567185433,0.0,0.0,0.09801021067727288,0.0,0.0,0.4895465551612946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05654618860422701,0.09075331840154306,0.0,0.09476587280947288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701935706631343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035508705802336,0.0,0.0,0.09060494839115757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590470984972094,0.1745969122920805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409805003340972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13273180510246874,0.07094578176390161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311603550343766,0.08672201460954626,0.0,0.0,0.10145009013761333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006234538982134,0.0,0.21497118876709906,0.0,0.0,0.07964736267721906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642595274843769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650625864086496,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rene_99,2020/01/23,Why do i have the impression that my mental health is going down ? I can t no more have the ability to learn something new What do you think ?,1.2688505747126442,3.441326,2.8282758620689665,92.00264367816094,82.10344827586206,6.625287356321839,20.011494252873558,7.793537801064563,0.7112666666666658,110,3,24,2,3,36,25,29,0.073,0.7659999999999999,0.161,0.3866,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,8,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,18,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24877926915425694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4653000296049463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4411416922129669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4227746358360444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369957233518663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804878524763992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3949947081033113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MotherOfTyrants,2020/01/23,"Care package for a friend I am new to this sub so I hope this is allowed.  I have a very dear friend who recently tried to commit suicide.  Thankfully she is ok, however she is staying in the hospital for a while.  I would like to send her a small care package and I am just looking for suggestions of what to  put in it.  I am thinking comfy socks, because she loves socks, a few books, maybe a journal?  I am not sure if she can have outside food but I am thinking maybe some chocolate or snacks of some kind. Any ideas that you have or experiences you care to share are welcome.  Thank you!",1.7279378531073455,3.9622853813559296,2.8450000000000024,92.17959039548029,80.77966101694916,5.967231638418079,25.93502824858757,7.1686216300943375,1.1533706214689263,457,19,97,6,12,146,75,118,0.032,0.655,0.313,0.986,2,0,0,0,0,2,12.0,0,3,0,0,2,16,0,0,7,1,14,3,0,1,2,17,24,7,1,3,6,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,2,0,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,16,16,12,23,3,9,0,0,1,1,16,3,0,6,4,67,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118642368180719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002764144900238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5031498244810488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609105453154143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19891155621347845,0.0,0.25418139337857604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633835663850042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18569814609578764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712992858980353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036538203246497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13813683571364238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846580895616046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3305205718895229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15887313087834973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536585952168192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624218658421433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17533291178825788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17993404202562865,0.0,0.1550373571833188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3028951954954759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21080726949547526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116833000802471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13572802416655355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685461349760115,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mikeforsure199,2020/01/23,"How do i deal with this kindof odd disorder? I 22M 106 kilos 6""7 have a odd type of information processing disorder. I am constantly overwhelmed by information etc. Its like my mind is distorting reality all the time. I suffer from brain fog and mild bipolar disorder. But for example when i look at a seemingly beautiful painting my mind just has to puzzle out the information processed by my brain seeing the painting with my senses. Basically im waiting to see a doctor for more then 8 months now and i just dont know what to do.. Also its not that bad at times. Sometimes i dont have trouble processing any information and im just in a flow state. But more often then not i have to out of frustration hit my head with my hand when it does happen again.",3.045781853281852,5.3568191959459455,4.957181467181467,78.350945945946,76.63513513513513,8.823166023166024,27.463320463320464,9.424239791934726,2.809367181467181,603,25,113,17,14,206,91,148,0.132,0.764,0.105,-0.4715,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,10,6,1,1,7,0,10,6,4,1,1,29,18,11,0,0,7,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,8,0,1,6,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,0,4,14,1,19,17,4,17,0,2,3,0,5,5,0,4,11,79,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596165751754507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860940256746438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107438295416967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32375045416078485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15670052801956424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494953495716851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4985700863002464,0.14842031237732448,0.12689617830655267,0.0,0.3398931108495737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16172059477293632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12822878216993006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488185185927909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132638385115413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796917883008065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084285858236994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176895163049695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29283048652854665,0.0,0.115742816691868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23110283652032085,0.1320084850344559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14341515097064395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16910892981396633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frizouw,2020/01/23,"Saying bad things without remembering? Hi,

Today my team lead invited me into a private meeting room to talk about problems. I am a programmer since one year by the way, just in case it's important. He want to talk to me about two things:

1. Supposedly, yesterday I told him to do the job he asked me, like I was angry against him but I don't even remember to have feel negative emotions and saying something like that.
2. He feels some tension and anxiety in me, that I am always anxious, worried, not sure about some things.

But the scariest part... in all that...is that I don't remember at all. So I apologized and told him that I don't even remember all those things. So I don't know what to do... Am I crazy? Or is he crazy? Should I consult? Should I see my doctor and ask for sick leaves cause i'm becoming crazy?

Also, some days before, I had a mental breakdown while I was waiting for the bus and my boyfriend was with me, so he asked me what is wrong and it was just...a mix of a lot of things, like I was feeling incapable to do my job, alone, lost, without friends, scared that he leaves me.

In case, I need to leave for mental health issues... I don't know how it works in Canada, like...will I still receive money??? will I lost my job???

I need your opinion, story and suggestion...

Thank you.",1.7998850574712648,3.848273770114943,3.1750865900383154,90.89357241379312,79.49808429118774,6.474850574712644,23.849961685823754,7.554174236665415,1.0407595708812258,998,35,214,15,25,325,133,261,0.212,0.708,0.08,-0.9891,3,1,1,0,0,0,61.0,0,2,0,5,12,13,0,2,8,0,23,3,0,3,4,44,42,16,0,6,7,0,3,3,1,3,3,2,1,0,16,9,0,1,9,1,1,2,9,7,0,2,10,6,37,6,28,29,8,17,0,2,1,0,28,8,0,6,9,144,53,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492761664215696,0.0,0.07329699415943941,0.0762648473104453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011632517394813,0.10354480136295846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570569943587005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652864343463531,0.0,0.10122646988727246,0.07799221161533455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415560535888734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059110314967827475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381344663702276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310027531920893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107539135566107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13903155928038646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081293166254228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742567521375743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566469089436924,0.27286228455289585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10074310193014832,0.0,0.0,0.2911503137211771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791132932353721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001059490735168,0.07792236021209609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847346851246836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13592301358059214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062108243869757676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925414254629096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770208343277452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4153119594827466,0.0,0.0,0.14577651123000188,0.091763300076005,0.0,0.07303769030766455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581850492859554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056100108048469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319632444969258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638437010227562,0.0,0.0,0.14733868720911794,0.0,0.08438421276410141,0.0,0.0,0.30445972240954833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687884389025555,0.17516181226743147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089534256811059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406088001316847,0.07275199268986374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17670556128884296,0.0,0.06672640842646799,0.09308076668604504,0.0,0.0,0.10021107035600782,0.0,0.059023236747326076
mentalhealth,Anon10062019,2020/01/23,"Dating a person diagnosed with mental illness For people diagnosed with any mental illness, how can you maintain a healthy romantic relationship with someone?

Context: I (24F) have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder when I was 22. I was on medication on and off but now I'm taking them as prescribed and going on regular check ups with my psychiatrist.

I have never been in a relationship until four months ago when I started dating someone. This person knows my condition and has been really patient and accepting of me. He has also struggled with depression some years back and knows how it feels. We are now exclusively dating and I feel that our relationship is going the serious route but I am afraid of sharing my emotional baggage because he might eventually get tired of me. I really like this person and he's the first to ever accept this side of mine. He constantly reassures me and I know that my fear is irrational but I can't shake the negative thoughts out of my mind. Please help. :(",5.729435483870965,8.303055747311827,6.770631720430112,67.22594758064518,69.48387096774194,10.671505376344086,33.668010752688176,10.686352973137794,4.607839784946236,843,41,127,28,16,281,115,186,0.162,0.6729999999999999,0.165,0.3525,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,2,1,1,1,9,12,0,4,6,0,16,7,0,2,2,36,28,19,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,1,7,0,0,3,6,17,0,0,8,0,1,3,3,7,0,2,6,2,23,5,22,21,2,28,0,2,0,0,17,8,0,2,18,99,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704294582080512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656856369212154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211824991409307,0.0,0.09237804211574098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928539429845546,0.0,0.07361176279218717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049438275196118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20801400520549407,0.3676945242340797,0.0,0.0,0.2767937734165124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358342946803651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923075400539872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588412017760734,0.12211576697017862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271502820352947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309004827117491,0.0,0.13725688374247688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094022997095128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990930890178367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058995302823336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216490088060781,0.24338737776615346,0.1281030783495438,0.12192917941453353,0.0,0.096386321176231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313450447798803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371703538093213,0.3163185560350171,0.0,0.13255387248834002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15471882613418786,0.0,0.0,0.3889403944079626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20463240616562886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854717485270044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262404347424122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09079351580997022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586680929602336,0.0,0.13879130711318832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776293233459003
mentalhealth,AA02_,2020/01/23,"Need help ASAP I’m 17 years old and for as long as I can remember I’ve always been scared of stupid things like the being home alone or staying awake late at night on my own.

In my own personal diagnosis, I feel that I have a sever case of anxiety. But the thing is, on some days it’s basically 0 and I feel completely normal, but on the odd day I’ll be awake late at night and be too scared to get out of bed to go to the toilet. Sometimes I’ll be scared to close my eyes, for fear of someone watching me. Sometimes I think (don’t actually believe I will but it’s the anxiety) that if I turn my face I’ll see someone , a spirit or something etc.

It’s been pissing me off for a long time now can someone help me out here.",2.598793706293705,3.2577622243589737,4.463986013986016,88.31737762237762,74.19230769230771,7.724009324009327,25.720279720279716,8.00094639256281,1.2390846153846151,561,18,131,8,11,192,92,156,0.162,0.78,0.057999999999999996,-0.946,0,1,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,2,4,8,0,12,3,3,0,0,19,21,11,0,3,6,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,7,6,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,2,5,14,1,22,14,4,24,1,0,3,0,3,10,1,4,13,79,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.12618042966058016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339182264736171,0.0,0.0,0.10758990329017046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978318690869264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567945633812845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557104116165947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667786220026706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442062862383803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550107827727995,0.13075829424066926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755513477235828,0.0,0.07348549837687626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333726297659272,0.0,0.1297007875373712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917173382290285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317059096287694,0.0,0.0,0.2288570001898292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587604513594512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426829697937712,0.12668883761268204,0.0,0.0,0.13568105258503602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290181399183025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647434280603358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3883625915059852,0.0,0.10303722244078753,0.0,0.0,0.14607483732960694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286723537892827,0.09954325682190412,0.2557666367827903,0.0,0.0,0.13781908793057104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718054555669925,0.0828517170982904,0.0,0.0,0.07539723302545029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14064381348587351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832664662353281
mentalhealth,not15fps,2020/01/23,"I feel like im not controlling myself anymore and nothing feels real 2 years ago I used to feel in control of myself, and time felt like it was the present. I would feel like I'm looking with my own eyes and things were real, but now it feels like I'm living in the past and there's a blur over my vision or something. sometimes it feels like I'm watching a TV screen or something. I know im in control of myself but it doesn't feel real. (no I'm not gonna kill anybody or something I'm sane lol)
when I'm looking out my window or standing on my porch nothing feels real it feels like I'm dreaming or something. I know I feel like this because sometimes I'll get the present feeling and everything will look/feel real, the blur would also be gone but it only stays like that for a couple seconds and happens randomly. 
 I've been living in my room for the past 3 or 4 years without any socializing and i leave the house maybe once or twice a month (sometimes none) so I was think that's why i feel this way but I'm not sure.
Does everyone feel like this and I just haven't gotten used to it? Will I ever feel like things are real and I'm living in the present again? 
I haven't told my family about it because I don't want them to think I'm crazy or look down on me.

note: sorry I'm had at explaining things",1.1858100186517468,3.131821255395685,2.7298721023181467,93.82958300026648,81.0503597122302,5.125712763122835,22.166799893418602,6.037888025583468,0.20326735944577692,1031,33,227,7,27,337,128,278,0.036000000000000004,0.821,0.14300000000000002,0.9819,0,0,4,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,3,9,12,1,0,11,1,15,1,1,5,2,67,58,24,1,3,17,0,15,10,0,5,0,0,3,0,16,11,0,3,20,2,0,1,10,1,0,2,9,21,24,11,21,43,2,30,0,0,6,0,4,12,0,11,24,124,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05485233524391273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04948491644214307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04208009915451859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06136771575396265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544218929347962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20820895330370032,0.0,0.06846835508567377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05415106091750164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055973440301985394,0.0,0.05912839771473712,0.05561319517926757,0.0,0.058334370704637886,0.0,0.4693210937712622,0.3536531215729902,0.05941390711677873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03232942116632692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05471972983998344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140049443348849,0.0,0.0,0.13368069416171618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846036385762737,0.0,0.06801457601783079,0.0,0.0,0.06552132690578527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3023113857216749,0.0,0.16392187407236306,0.0,0.20785237209189789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06216615262096166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0493915293674445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187498646827192,0.0,0.0,0.06589951832782454,0.0,0.04706205556213425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814173670314007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4225936775133538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307823348734519,0.0,0.19055107416527414,0.18360086206716775,0.06926889782838816,0.0,0.06595518391726443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05832058170243205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233297280158191,0.07929961402489832,0.0,0.0,0.03608236308711879,0.0,0.0,0.05912839771473712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688783004923673,0.0,0.0,0.0364980605401244,0.04911697021880774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05583651416259736,0.0,0.0,0.059649512476728714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791466982676648,0.0,0.0,0.0796965816151443
mentalhealth,posknad,2020/01/23,"Strange symptom of unique circumstance or is this what I think it is? Can't believe I'm asking this question, or that I'm in this situation but I'd like to know what you all think. 

After a traumatic life event last year, a friend and coworker (that I've worked closely with for the last few years) really stepped up and offered emotional support.  This was surprising and unexpected, but it came at the perfect time. 

I didn't realize it then, but it sparked an unbelievable connection between us.  I say ""us"" because of how it feels when we are in the same room... Theres no way it's just one sided, but we haven't ever really talked about it.  Looking back I see that the energy that was created actually got me through the tough time. 


I am pretty sure I'm in love with this person. I say ""pretty sure"" because I've never been in love before, but I always thought being in love was something that grew over time, with physical connection. The emotions I have towards this person are so strong. I'm 35 if you were wondering.  Here's the bad part: this person is married. We haven't ever crossed any lines or had any physical contact ever, but it's all I can think about. I want everything with this person and it is very unlikely that I will be able to express it to them.  The idea of being separated from them (which is highly probable) physically hurts my body, which is ridiculous but also kind of blows my mind.

So my question is: what is this plague in my mind? Is this love? Do people really fall in love before any physical contact? Or is this just a strange symptom of my emotional duress from last year (like Stockholm syndrome or something lol)? More importantly what can I do to make it stop?",4.6363855116514685,6.024926462006083,5.429806231003043,80.5496130952381,70.09422492401218,8.88758865248227,30.42565856129685,9.2995712137729,2.687641236068896,1342,55,256,28,24,437,168,329,0.075,0.7020000000000001,0.223,0.9961,0,0,2,0,0,0,44.0,5,2,2,3,15,19,1,0,12,1,32,9,1,2,9,55,56,23,0,2,15,0,1,2,1,1,3,2,1,4,34,13,0,1,11,0,0,5,6,4,0,1,10,5,27,15,32,42,6,40,0,1,2,5,29,15,0,9,21,177,61,1,0.08353595004425805,0.0,0.08151903703753223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06680366906968567,0.06950860236225631,0.0,0.0,0.17042193179964546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780948367670326,0.0,0.0,0.0642339892175668,0.06974902898799107,0.10184547958864727,0.0,0.14216588154843793,0.09411640956351497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927896086672714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955428726196156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819001005049097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266891480152838,0.0,0.0,0.07507672547062576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042238286316834864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453966778431015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681133040465873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826031766367386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942696225399184,0.09430191956918108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698983711276324,0.045909173490496606,0.20427884604240212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900391196780064,0.08162289125560564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014915897054601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3769722818809238,0.0,0.05576089532182507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869499224438314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442807450209873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05660612167736891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046129337902636,0.0,0.057913309603663775,0.2917614777873873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997218582230886,0.09006588294852334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18715876429970613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605458059758078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13286228072543985,0.0,0.0,0.06656733674936187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389790786885004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286201110826694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983979472923467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479560616442888,0.15746328861870498,0.17365167487997935,0.0,0.06714303236002664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057939126360454,0.0,0.06631821327897308,0.1461314527473659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20096692478599906,0.0,0.0,0.06892590737893499,0.04927166767793841,0.0663069488667149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059117441794348,0.0608151665405831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16138323898439003
mentalhealth,WED_Nosce,2020/01/23,"Anyone know how to find a therapist who has no political or religious affiliations? i.e. Independent/Atheist I find that speaking to a therapist helps keep me grounded. I think it's once again about that time. I would like to speak to someone that I can trust won't allow their beliefs to affect their diagnosis/treatment. 

Not looking for a discussion as to the merits of my concern. Any suggestions?",4.9732738095238105,7.863648986111118,5.957539682539682,70.67000000000003,73.0277777777778,9.114285714285714,33.8968253968254,9.606745405546679,4.00963253968254,325,17,51,9,7,107,57,72,0.055,0.782,0.163,0.8222,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,3,0,12,8,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,8,3,10,6,0,3,1,0,1,0,8,1,0,1,3,36,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739809795742778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788903114226976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4676689555111106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17148515113321566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274036626248405,0.0,0.0,0.1406037865721227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499122407287985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21484240787193196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27246282643126424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21677365576216195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5941033545073908,0.0,0.16393288995413952,0.0,0.0,0.1491832244073406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817424469372668,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Discodrisco,2020/01/23,"Had 2 mental breakdowns, 2 years of depression, went back to college and now working as an engineer. Hi everyone

Just wanted to write a story about my life here, just to look back and realise how far Ive come.

I was born into a world of trauma and abuse, thankfully my caring mother picked up the broken pieces as my father abused me emotionally, physically, psychologically and sexually.

I didnt realize how much stress I was under until I reached the age of 22 when I had my 1st mental breakdown....I did however self medicate with drugs which amplified the effect...I was smoking cannibas daily all day as of it were tobacco.

I went to the hospital and I came back to normal within a week from my psychosis, experienced a short wave of depression after so I took 2 years out of college, shortly after I fell back into my drug habits and a year later I experienced yet another breakdown.

I was kept in hospital for 8 weeks and after I was releasd I was depressed for about a year. (Couch ridden watching the same movies over and over)

One day I had none of it anymore, I decided to take the last year before going back to college to focus on my studies in preparation for the next year of college, my mental health (therapy, mindfullness, quitting drugs).

I then went back to college and finished the last 3 years, each with a 1st class honours and now working as an engineer.

Currently trying keep a habit of gym and mindfullness, still going to therapy and I think I'll be doing that for the rest of my life.

Also im receiving once a month injections to keep my psychosis at bay.

I probably wouldn't be alive right now if it weren't for family and friends.

Just to note to people experiencing depression, when you think it wont get better, just keep going through it...it does get better eventually but involves work ofcourse.",7.454540614542136,7.266436413294798,8.086671737146336,69.52010191664132,63.479768786127174,11.330453300882265,36.12960146029815,10.882677951670544,4.0696554913294785,1453,62,252,35,19,486,185,346,0.077,0.894,0.028999999999999998,-0.909,2,0,4,0,2,0,42.0,0,1,0,7,24,12,0,1,20,0,19,7,0,3,1,44,41,27,0,4,6,2,0,0,1,2,7,0,1,1,6,21,0,4,4,1,0,12,5,6,0,1,19,5,31,6,54,18,7,67,0,4,2,0,9,17,0,1,38,175,37,9,0.0,0.1917751711671208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471886114298166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486107228877428,0.0,0.0,0.08025978338644385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3733762549324939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886458539878386,0.0,0.0,0.14315017936193547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256117204910252,0.08251246971638522,0.0,0.0,0.06971313425252154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438496995386187,0.0,0.2788159832553905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082147943732395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815557057211892,0.0,0.0,0.09103418876458458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733109069268017,0.0,0.0,0.076292622256132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252551477658813,0.0,0.08456408415856549,0.0,0.13798138121069192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602370149319939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741716572427566,0.0,0.0,0.21580013789449476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319358098697213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432503749317698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679599450439747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152741438924634,0.2446720750008504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459672483247515,0.0,0.05949209838889441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606886850176111,0.0,0.07929319926553742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618670258914853,0.05483955866045067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056105951885071455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725510819151397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607791212546821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911289079411842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442655662592616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462997306453963,0.0,0.09270385178199053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084850719249089,0.0,0.0,0.07450851445094876,0.18509864063730053,0.0,0.0,0.10371202131400777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991505380891991,0.05494545243180015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047733998194100034,0.0,0.12983266245091732,0.0,0.0,0.2250658738580277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675174313950984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648091841890779
mentalhealth,WhiteWulph,2020/01/23,"Is there something wrong with me? Since around 15 I’ve had strange mental things happen to me\[26M\]. 

For instance, I am no longer capable of having nightmares. An example of this is I was having a nightmare where a demon was attempting to kill me. In the end it switched up and I ended up having a relationship with this grudge like figure. Naturally I woke up confused but got on with it.  
 Another example is where I’ve been chased by something that is trying to kill me, I then enter a pause menu just as I am about to die and quit… then wake up. This happens regularly in any form of nightmare I have. 

Another thing to add to this is that I’m often faced with tasks that I cannot workout myself, but when I go to sleep, I dream about the resolution of my issue. This is around coding (sql and python). Suddenly I have the knowledge to resolve issues I spend around 7 days trying to resolve. 

How is it I cannot resolve these issues consciously but somehow I’m resolving them subconsciously while I’m asleep?",5.356981946624806,6.266165443877554,5.943061224489796,79.3074332810047,68.03061224489795,8.887912087912088,30.89324960753532,9.057496981413335,2.5601472527472526,801,31,151,14,13,260,112,196,0.11,0.7909999999999999,0.099,-0.4871,0,0,2,0,0,2,22.0,0,0,1,5,13,9,2,1,8,0,20,4,4,1,0,26,28,12,3,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,14,11,0,0,7,2,1,2,3,4,0,0,6,0,19,5,32,22,1,22,1,0,0,0,2,12,0,3,9,112,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834492992085228,0.3032883346304211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862209850214491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326639071334608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009024085610367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256176544865185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218951711056773,0.0,0.11566390904938807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557697393554398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45282961746771,0.0,0.0,0.3199959040596247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065285643434932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574053048544391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538186232679176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552651851504986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962917652901899,0.0,0.14472204518044332,0.0,0.0,0.2226673939896685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921550202679929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963717204379481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811664760563449,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,D0esANyoneREadTHese,2020/01/23,"I have (almost) completely lost control of my actions To start, before anyone says ""well clearly you have control because you're asking for help"" I'm able to type this because my dopamine-starved brain has figured out that reddit upvotes are the easiest way to get tiny drips of the delicious chemical that it craves, and this takes almost no effort, so it allows me to do these things because it's expecting gratification.

I don't control my actions anymore. To be specific, I don't consciously control my actions anymore, it's like my consciousness is sorta floating around somewhere near my body, and my body is controlled by a feral toddler. I can sometimes bait it into doing what I want, but if I let it know what I'm doing or how to get out of it, no dice. I get brief periods of control when I get serious adrenaline rushes but those are seldom on purpose. 

I'm diagnosed with ADHD, asperger's (now high-functioning autism), and gender dysphoria. There's probably something else unknown going on as well, in addition to all of this. I am physically being blocked from control of my body, if I want to do something my subconscious doesn't want to I have to put in immense mental effort and specifically, consciously, control each muscle individually until sometimes my subconscious decides to play along, but the mental effort involved is physically draining.

I don't want to do this anymore. I'm sitting here, crying internally as I watch my monkey brain run my life for me and ruin all my best laid plans. My conscious has so many things it wants to do and during brief moments of control I try to get the ball rolling but as soon as I lose it then it's hopeless. 

I've been rotting in retail for more than a year now, I hate it, but it's the only thing I can reliably do as my hyperactive body loves the runner's high that comes from it, and it only makes the gap between conscious and subconscious worse since I have 8 hours a day where I literally don't have to think about anything and can completely dissociate, it's been 15 months since I started and it feels like it's been less than 3. I've got projects I've barely started that I set in motion more than a year ago. 

I don't know what to do, therapy does nothing but push my conscious and subconscious EVEN FARTHER APART and make me feel EVEN MORE LIKE SHIT because not only do I have to sit back and watch myself ruin my life, I KNOW WHY I'M DOING IT AND WHY IT'S BAD and I can't do anything about it.",7.939813848295058,6.923562288100211,8.132372129436327,72.30547538274183,62.86221294363257,10.822581767571327,38.32994084899096,9.928628108626363,3.7811773834377167,1972,88,357,34,24,647,224,479,0.111,0.799,0.09,-0.9586,0,0,2,0,0,1,44.0,0,1,0,16,19,17,2,0,11,0,41,11,7,13,3,74,75,35,0,8,10,0,2,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,36,24,0,10,14,3,1,13,10,9,2,0,5,5,47,8,55,67,8,50,0,5,2,1,6,15,1,6,21,241,83,2,0.06308951601103276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582133809422792,0.0,0.055925049340208303,0.0,0.12635007404668572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18770354167284647,0.04411365649922633,0.0,0.10383459220386898,0.05616304500395418,0.05898018101167635,0.0,0.0,0.04851194352906912,0.052677110618368064,0.15383513353843584,0.0,0.05368453136296897,0.0,0.06620855473975636,0.0,0.0,0.28031291909984896,0.0,0.14085752964795292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05434603171598345,0.1322963144185906,0.0,0.6368423113512626,0.0,0.0,0.06930087088267445,0.040687518561678834,0.0,0.0,0.06403453072731917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05521006061400063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05270319515734181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334006062778128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379990984606529,0.04507116284416315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16480834096009198,0.0,0.035855225847536934,0.0,0.05045844929099296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06228783559805196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04228757271227357,0.1333150750408909,0.0,0.0,0.062130464855639465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040170441988426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451330456676696,0.08912398187448392,0.09246705224533346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058103074313754,0.06886965939584737,0.0,0.0569407513791168,0.0,0.08422548367096984,0.0639628669440934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271587866531836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035744977091418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06053609214624212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439472595465877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802116886583777,0.0,0.0,0.06342238903233575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05017131535972833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476048156461882,0.10437659918679162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971387834003409,0.12479428905931733,0.0,0.13396525245769747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04743546445315284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07214835986445632,0.0,0.12574161325546435,0.04042521441686543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042833640066895495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18605915568151532,0.050077521234306976,0.0,0.0,0.1134501032803956,0.0,0.11385695050695352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429360670338449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125515968014334
mentalhealth,0HoneyBear0,2020/01/23,"Mental health services in my city are a complete joke I got referred to a psychiatrist from my doctor a few months ago.
The psychiatrist and I had an initial appointment where she talked to me for an hour and determined a few possible diagnoses.
We checked in every two or three weeks and I did a screening tool for ptsd and ADD. I was ""diagnosed"" with depression and put on a medication. We never touched on any of the diagnoses from the screening tools and I'd sit in her office for five minutes while she would go, ""hows your mood? hows your sleep? Are you suicidal? Okay see you in three weeks"".

I started zoloft during christmas and was on it for three weeks. In this program you don't get in touch with the psychiatrist directly, they have a nurse you're suppose to call. I missed the call from the nurse to schedule a follow up appointment with the zoloft. I called her for a week and a half and left messages without any answer, then recieved a letter in the mail saying my file would be closed if I didn't call the nurse back.

After two weeks of calling she finally answered and asked me if I got the letter, then reluctantly set up an appointment. When I told the psychiatrist I quit the zoloft cold turkey because I was running out of my script, was experiencing very bad side effects and couldn't get ahold of the nurse, she offered me another med. 

I told her I couldn't keep experimenting with meds while being in school and working so I would try it in april. She said if we weren't going to be making any changes she was going to close my file and transfer my care to my family doctor. I told her multiple times during our visit that my family doctor is unable to make mental health diagnoses. 

I feel kind of lost, I was expecting a lot more out of these visits. I have had horrible mental health issues since I was 12 years old -- self harm, suicide attempts, mood swings and depressive episodes. I'm really upset that we got 1/4 of the way through any sort of screening processes so I'm sitting here without any guidelines or layouts to follow while I continue going through counselling. 

Is this common practise for psychiatrists? 

Td;lr

Psychiatrist closed my file becaus I wanted to post pone trying another depression medication. She left me half way through the screening process for other mental illnesses, and left care with my family doctor who does not have the capacity to help me with my mental illnesses.",7.089111759461873,7.488765991247266,7.045684415268664,74.6954477672421,64.1422319474836,10.271464462274091,33.774941243212574,10.082433333333334,3.3510760839614235,1946,77,347,40,27,621,220,457,0.102,0.8640000000000001,0.034,-0.9857,0,0,0,0,0,1,41.0,5,5,1,5,8,15,0,1,31,1,28,19,1,5,1,59,57,30,2,10,8,0,3,0,0,3,18,2,0,1,9,31,0,1,5,1,1,10,9,8,0,8,20,12,60,5,57,29,4,66,0,5,5,0,44,24,0,7,26,232,69,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056827864530975915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21797815567646175,0.13444563308780652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05993231612822565,0.0,0.0,0.04929508668349482,0.05352749334011947,0.07815927059488095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273071243014281,0.0,0.1307247354936541,0.0,0.06781775234841128,0.0,0.06721600715979859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564835194491598,0.26027303903407906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624689744757302,0.0561013335228952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05401374600788753,0.0,0.0,0.0627099149727204,0.18130592076865734,0.0,0.03241492566027989,0.0,0.0,0.07022716879245126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06698755698313781,0.0,0.14573619093628035,0.0,0.15381904645134026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20443138465985905,0.0,0.0,0.04297023394325583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06313345596861815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691208513458917,0.0,0.05698212654547395,0.0,0.06675860573647859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208960554117714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998144338922972,0.05450232004781178,0.0,0.0,0.08558516143621106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241904817986245,0.1291641095963871,0.3230288746770496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05117038549753161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04944403354233907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672705507301509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227212562398291,0.061397732741371024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749388089387724,0.06444623607277096,0.0,0.06818673791443501,0.0,0.0,0.041069219575963586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06098137848260062,0.05098124626156821,0.0,0.06488070781516081,0.05108576744680477,0.0,0.06687861435671318,0.0,0.0,0.0530307912891407,0.0,0.06415428740362505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04537596484544983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14024747046885014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051527573496478976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03738188415049888,0.0,0.0,0.18377379342147374,0.0,0.08705023326068119,0.0,0.12524838073890382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05289580517060469,0.037812553117284486,0.10177187597773754,0.2571178107331984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359562812751808,0.0,0.04667137979139167,0.0,0.0,0.13662142892326706,0.0,0.0,0.04128344329797602
mentalhealth,oceannbreaze,2020/01/23,"Four years of being a recluse and internet addict (to escape) after graduating high school, I opened my old Facebook account. It was shocking to see how different they look and how different they are, and what they’ve achieved, whilst I’ve done nothing, look worse, and stayed the same but got worse I don’t even know what to do now 

It makes me feel so sick",9.45608695652174,7.113918376811597,8.087246376811596,78.04652173913045,60.88405797101449,11.518840579710146,37.492753623188406,9.725611199111238,3.2707449275362315,284,10,57,4,3,86,52,69,0.107,0.821,0.071,-0.5579,2,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,1,5,1,0,0,2,0,6,2,0,3,0,12,13,8,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,3,4,6,0,5,9,1,8,0,0,3,0,2,2,0,0,5,35,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323984776860336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4454570086703423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21815791594773776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080387089673746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779058956184996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17050011545708402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252371605353631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171585617777664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580362681375804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229980203625184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20455267344288705,0.0,0.22369733003085626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157502941663672,0.16987745241255328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272223085683572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4344987814770669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372814097699712
mentalhealth,AdministrativeMoment,2020/01/23,"I find it odd that i have anxiety about not being anxious anymore (advice wanted) I have been on Dexamfetamine for over a decade. I am now 27. 

I recently quit those meds on doctors order (to many side effects). 

While on them (got them for more energy) i could work 15 hours a week and do a bit of cleaning in the house. I also felt anxious about leaving the house alone because i fainted a lot before i became 21 (afterwards like once every 2 months, before weekly or daily). 

Now, a month without them i went for a walk and i felt so weird, i missed something. I think i missed my anxiety. 

Dont get me wrong, i felt fine, but being fine feels weird! 
I have this huge mental blockade to work through. That blockade is “but i am not on meds, i should be a mess”. 

I feel that blockade every time i go out alone, but once i am outside i feel okay. 

I guess i just have to convince myself that everything is fine and keep pushing my “limits” that i gave myself. Like, yes you can go to the store alone (has been a while) and yes go through that street even though there are people (still working on that one).

Oh and my energylevel? I still work 15 hours a week, but yesterday i also baked bread and cleaned out the scullery and took out the glass (few streets from here) still felt i could have done more. 

Kinda mad at the doctor for not checking up on me to see if the meds were working... sounds like they worked counter productive for years now. 

Thanks for reading, i just had to get this out. I give myself until the first of march (3 months off meds) to really feel the difference before i will complain to the doctor. He is mot even the one who prescribed them in the first place. Dunno the name of the shrink that did.",2.6472254901960817,4.571853585294118,3.232941176470587,92.06990196078432,76.38235294117645,5.945098039215687,22.803921568627448,6.742157984588678,0.5072862745098039,1329,39,279,12,30,415,177,340,0.08800000000000001,0.8009999999999999,0.11199999999999999,0.841,0,3,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,1,5,11,19,17,1,0,23,3,29,6,0,1,0,45,55,20,0,5,12,0,8,3,0,2,4,1,3,0,13,11,2,2,11,1,2,7,5,8,0,4,14,10,45,9,40,34,5,54,0,2,1,0,12,21,0,6,28,192,58,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744550044037167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367391836263804,0.0,0.12186317093219275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657500853613995,0.17215300534952604,0.07556307024774976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0464465996427375,0.0,0.19450411966658926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318311896953025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166796279893966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960556076763897,0.0,0.2339605644345515,0.0,0.07797198336493634,0.089297732442013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006496329192028,0.0,0.12839192673823002,0.0,0.06847743512046009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541020598716514,0.0,0.2926292551059167,0.0,0.06963910267248129,0.1296196045659206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961548813237375,0.0730913534231402,0.12990686445169364,0.0,0.060938573365012634,0.0,0.08393527723342757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500696887838591,0.17583318884582644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677239180536256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067747946749887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167228335938073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477663928012288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724783291358403,0.0,0.0,0.3385333799541909,0.0,0.07678471255411949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18244978930937364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16228630547900869,0.103260817524587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05282269406578781,0.0,0.07960556076763897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104072857259899,0.07621370758249761,0.0,0.04881124362512646,0.0,0.07523148303978275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06071602690210207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05865716210076239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18254369705703116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014835916518886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04882145466523992,0.07485932274579347,0.0,0.0444288027207647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465332499814833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044940657780992266,0.0,0.18335249945780602,0.0,0.0,0.07063175652501541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344741850248893,0.0,0.3328168559577464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330518144801352,0.0,0.04906585100246142
mentalhealth,ol-gill,2020/01/23,"Everyday is a real effort Everyday is a real effort

Does anyone else find the thought of everyday just so daunting and anxiety inducing? I feel like we’re all just existing until we die anyway so why the fuck am I putting myself through what feels like the worst hell of having to get up and go to a fucking job everyday. The consistency of everyday life is so overwhelming. Knowing that I have to do this everyday.

All I want to do at the moment is stay in bed when I’m not at work and the second my alarm goes off in the morning my body aches and my stomach is churning. 

I wake up to this feeling every. Single. Day. Some days are easier than others, and then I have days like this where is makes me suicidal. 

How do you cope?",2.7027818756585877,4.681386643835616,4.469452054794524,83.02207060063226,76.39726027397259,8.05395152792413,26.299262381454163,8.841846274778883,2.171620231822971,574,22,112,13,13,194,92,146,0.17,0.748,0.08199999999999999,-0.9543,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,1,0,3,9,9,3,2,10,0,14,6,3,3,2,24,26,12,2,1,3,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,6,0,0,7,0,0,2,1,6,0,1,1,3,13,3,18,25,5,24,1,1,0,2,2,8,3,1,16,83,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973288048660994,0.0,0.0,0.11857852423483425,0.1737609709617602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18837189494483145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3281069597510637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600356798394615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484059139518112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416674018923745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288357938925278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572434396589152,0.2423046466666164,0.0,0.0,0.1549985970003674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31355918077567324,0.08860172292896115,0.0,0.09637967252118804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16828800836031665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320006981348736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978365752557565,0.24855356517066896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320001955453285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048084180085607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3860521528665416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18075618802766424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854996372400423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346323977883309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002625876855302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15302505206329806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346067978057805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Din-A14,2020/01/23,"I need your help to cheer up my depressed best friend. #Trigger-warning

Hey Guys I come to you with a special request today.

My best friend Johanne is currently struggling with depression and yesterday she had a very hard day. She was losing her will for life and got suicidal thoughts again. I was able to talk her out of it again so she’s safe again. I told her how happy I am she didn’t do anything bad.  And I told her that that she deserves all the thank in the world because she decided to keep fighting. But she said sadly nobody around her is happy about that except me.

So here’s my request for you to help her:
Please comment “Thank you Johanne” 
I will show her this post later to show more people than just me are happy she’s still alive. 
You’re more than welcome to add more to the comment to cheer her up or even add your own story so we can help each other. 
I’d be so thankful if you can help me out to help her out guys! ❤️

#HappyPost #Motivational",2.2056179138321994,4.19142134183674,3.1658503401360565,91.7593083900227,77.92857142857143,5.784126984126985,23.64399092970521,6.691623216298621,0.6216426303854874,757,25,160,7,18,241,113,196,0.11199999999999999,0.603,0.28600000000000003,0.9916,1,0,0,0,2,0,16.0,1,6,0,4,14,22,1,1,5,0,14,1,0,2,1,27,25,11,1,2,5,0,1,0,2,2,1,1,0,2,6,14,0,2,3,2,0,1,1,7,0,0,9,2,37,15,26,13,8,19,0,4,0,0,44,8,0,2,9,114,43,1,0.12370321222074805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179720346090332,0.11012208548045636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328701511769824,0.07540832999806338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596377786879467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10655936389719907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977833817096977,0.0,0.2130907908432756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08170480499902377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19114558980532886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893675931642924,0.0,0.0,0.2449712573797217,0.0,0.3950531089826123,0.11081378036268427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4145782779988281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995309884107167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737523713012325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839225241877967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917243644239741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576023166687306,0.0,0.0,0.13578897964093933,0.0,0.0,0.118473482581283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767008257249342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878954507344287,0.0,0.0,0.12932145626004726,0.0,0.1353112363257055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942795618864024,0.0,0.3416678932864587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820653272038216,0.0,0.0,0.11725618094831886,0.23640744092324484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206810533053956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PoignantDemureness,2020/01/23,"Getting chased by myself          Since I'm in a break from school and everything, the discomfort I have for idea of doing nothing and letting the time pass by made me prepare a to do list (or ""friendly advices"" as I toned it down). 


          So far so good, it's nice not to be lazy all day and have a productive holiday. It's like having me time but double of it because it's actually also very good for me. I'm kind of a person that has to be tired physically at the end of the day or else feels down. And it leads to over thinking. And not in a good way. 


          But...I...feel...not...very...good. Not feeling good also makes me feel guilty because right now I'm surrounded by people that I love and cares about me a lot. And I'm also confused because I am taking my own friendly advices every day and it makes me feel very strong and successful. I'm also having very good time with people I couldn't see during my school year. Then, why? is the question I ask.


          Sometimes it's scary to be a human being. Because it has a great potential for amazing things, and also for terrible things. And friendship, family, love are some great words. But you're a being as yourself, as one, your own. That truth is most of the times never the biggest, or the most important. But it's the most real. It's so real that you don't even think about it. It's something you were born with. And die with. But in the middle of that, in the middle of birth and death, in the middle of that truth...that's where the magic happens. And where the horror happens.


          I know who's been chasing me. It's nothing but my own self. The only horror that you can never end because that end would be the end of everything. I'm advising myself to stay away from myself, not away but not too close, like a heater you reached out with your hands, it feels so nice but you can burn yourself if you're too close. I've been trying to keep that balance since I had realized the truth. Knowing only reduces the fear.


          Writing all of these cracked me up",2.3607160581354134,4.142261243176183,3.570050336760016,89.9752952853598,76.76674937965261,6.0945480326125505,23.424955689471826,6.868970318607317,0.7024714498404823,1543,48,322,15,35,501,174,403,0.10099999999999999,0.6809999999999999,0.218,0.9956,0,0,1,0,0,0,65.0,0,7,0,3,17,26,0,3,28,0,28,4,1,4,6,72,56,38,2,3,16,0,6,2,2,1,1,0,0,3,28,21,0,1,12,1,0,2,9,4,0,1,5,7,29,22,48,42,11,47,0,0,1,2,19,24,0,11,20,221,57,5,0.0,0.0,0.0753047414396204,0.0,0.0,0.1508151628378378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085557195796173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721415721312203,0.0,0.14500356961315292,0.0,0.0,0.23520418622235825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867781978234509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14930073991685222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008809977071499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446388074387993,0.0,0.2733914286106049,0.0,0.0,0.05096867195108388,0.0,0.06501728625619188,0.0,0.13870707027846374,0.0,0.07274703090602687,0.0868353445009672,0.23411046147251155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923946041852315,0.0,0.04031704417741765,0.0,0.0,0.388348653512832,0.0,0.17015577032530968,0.0,0.0,0.1364786430282766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871131692483991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859037757819315,0.0,0.0803584957540077,0.08481892242708412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890940880472086,0.0,0.07540067872400995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656053913323786,0.13929409006083632,0.07301813538453096,0.10302034855290264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903328763806058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14808936775713707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05229096799624069,0.1173793346572448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699701478585097,0.06738003614022409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644571173761062,0.0,0.0,0.1756679349721765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659009672747287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619607467723695,0.061492827496562215,0.0,0.08050295221910574,0.0,0.0,0.12766817310300727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05940762158755795,0.07632102895678462,0.0,0.0,0.08225071677100393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05802065917274132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025338512809838,0.09889215230441542,0.0,0.0,0.17998889854844508,0.08869315230624956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05239194050484386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910148042329862,0.0,0.06125228929972714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06963202949489145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054817864028765886,0.0,0.0,0.04969359929514632
mentalhealth,adam717,2020/01/23,"My ear hasn't stopped popping for over 4 years now This started a little over four years ago; where my right eustachian tube would pop several hundreds, thousands, or even several thousands of times in a day, like the feeling of going into an airplane. I'm tired of it. You can image how it's changed my outlook on life. The thing is; this is most likely some sort of psychogenic movement disorder. It's cause by anxiety, not an anatomical issue. 

I haven't been able to get my mind of these two girls I met around the time my ear started popping. They're identical twin sisters and cupid struck me with 2 arrows when I laid my eyes on them. I haven't talked to either of these two girls in close to 2 years now because an attempted relationship with one of them had failed. I have been told it's best not to talk to them and I've been severely suffering for years.

I can't stop loving them. It feels like a psychotic love. I'm still a virgin and I've masturbated to their facebook pictures well over a thousand times over the course of these past years. These numbers aren't exaggerated. I keep getting feelings of jealousy as if they've found other guys, though I know little to nothing about where they're at in life because the lack of contact. I never once found out if they were virgins or not, which drives me crazy because I want to know out of jealousy. The fear of the unknown drives me insane. 

I see my ego, but I can't see around my ego. I can't stop wanting to have sex with one of these twins. I want to marry her. She's too cute. Of course I love her personality, too. I would do anything. My ear won't stop popping. I can't stand the no contact. It's been years and I haven't let go. I'll never want to let go until I don't see the value in her it feels. This is like a virus that has infected my brain. It's always there, non-stop. This girl. sex. This girl. sex. I can never focus.",1.9703498847684884,4.0542042248062025,3.0943571478455216,91.50702074167194,79.10335917312662,5.837530553809624,23.379356100286326,6.885778809224403,0.6710050841539217,1493,50,317,16,37,479,188,387,0.08800000000000001,0.8059999999999999,0.107,0.7989,0,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,6,3,16,13,0,1,18,0,30,17,5,2,3,51,60,14,0,9,9,1,4,4,0,3,4,3,0,6,22,13,0,5,8,0,0,6,18,3,1,8,10,11,44,10,50,45,5,55,0,2,4,8,28,22,0,7,30,206,66,1,0.0827253079456195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333099413432898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06883408319700447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328463414927386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680758797861974,0.14728612571075395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512857396853045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681510694301317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234880256926058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498167899498714,0.08751240682207838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335097993095054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481036989025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05463928569712092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930889704434484,0.1673136052587738,0.11819795305129735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18140806054268716,0.0,0.0,0.08644111808083013,0.0,0.14104409673289586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191106092055105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634372878547468,0.0,0.07353005470036765,0.0,0.0,0.09092733158641446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16918446437097578,0.11686266295999445,0.1616616273820882,0.16582498255938538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22398846069774853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352897869065251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19140857202338546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937716408771514,0.0,0.0,0.08809975310010329,0.11211361922349804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897066699779963,0.0,0.07223254803423901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881602165134739,0.0,0.07064696098215571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19776407985279973,0.0,0.0,0.28036815346743665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710679749746553,0.0,0.06606453778600835,0.3458103081831123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298293789543586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05495901873943807,0.0,0.08127719503724125,0.0,0.14471337696718425,0.09508057209908083,0.0,0.07904757685722857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162121081098152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19517411986059532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437998675320184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753137051906146,0.0,0.0,0.3196343163673118
mentalhealth,pturgeon01,2020/01/23,"Sleep trouble Hey everyone, not completely sure this belongs here, but I'm tired of dealing with this on my own.
I have trouble sleeping. I can't seem to want to sleep before 1 AM, even if I need to be up early. I also (albeit rarely nowadays) get sleep paralysis and nightmares, which in turn make me not want to sleep. This happened last night. I am nyctophobic, and can't sleep without a light on, due to one particularly bad experience.
Because of all these factors, I am constantly exhausted and can't always think straight.
If any of you have any advice on how you cope with your sleep problems, please send some.
Thanks",4.228050847457624,6.3572760423728845,4.612000000000002,83.01393220338984,72.47457627118644,7.431864406779661,29.59661016949153,8.238735603445708,2.1685532203389832,495,21,92,8,10,156,81,118,0.214,0.733,0.053,-0.9565,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,3,0,0,4,7,0,0,1,0,9,9,7,2,2,22,20,8,0,6,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,0,1,11,2,16,19,3,12,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,4,5,58,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312927978414218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258137092449477,0.09633006371297416,0.0,0.0,0.1574553843258055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966632643728669,0.0705724270394777,0.0,0.0985118960959613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138283085463132,0.12510643620671308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935397187720527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646511187446324,0.0,0.0,0.1106233679791994,0.0,0.11324545035746572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604851406847056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237518762160112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09436814814143947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727749395750519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08584212137067111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864247121422768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844886995866666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127080892239908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107764269224814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539282362626157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8109765131689906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091120243365077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658562730540913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418085659285828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306079114843325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592471133085992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365685030443828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159832201656912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRA86753009,2020/01/23,"I want to help my boyfriend and be there but I don’t think I can anymore I (21F) have been with my boyfriend (21M) for about a year. I love him immensely and can’t think about being happy with anyone else. He has suffered from depression, anxiety, bipolar and borderline personality disorder for a long time. At the start of my relationship, he made these issues known to me and I was willing to stick it out, and we had a conversation again about his mental health usually worsening around wintertime. 
We broke up for about three weeks because his depression was so bad, he was afraid of hurting me and letting me down, and his bpd which causes him to push people away. We got back together, but I don’t know if I can do it anymore, and I feel terrible for thinking that. 
I don’t want him, his family, or our friends and coworkers (we work at the same place) to think I’m a coward or that I gave up on him or can’t handle his mental illness, or am being selfish by leaving him. But I’ve noticed his worsening mental health has started to take a toll on me, and brought up stress and anxiety that has never been this bad for me before. I’m only 21, and frequently worrying about whether or not he’s alive. One day he tells me he loves me 25 times and wants to marry me one day and the next he’s totally apathetic and I feel like he doesn’t even want to speak to me or be with me. I know I can’t fully understand what he’s going through and I feel awful that I don’t feel like I can handle it anymore, because I genuinely want to be there for him so he isn’t alone. 
I love him so much, I don’t know what to do. But I do need to take care of myself too. Anyone with bpd, depression or any knowledge beyond my own (which is very little) know what I should do?",5.0662299394896095,4.800252337016577,6.062138910812948,82.30297421731125,68.4475138121547,9.657669034464616,30.22152065245988,9.362217197678863,2.3536736122073134,1374,47,296,25,21,458,168,362,0.213,0.6809999999999999,0.106,-0.9937,0,1,0,0,0,0,38.0,5,0,0,1,17,20,0,2,8,1,37,7,0,2,2,67,71,32,0,8,14,0,4,2,1,2,4,1,0,1,14,26,0,0,15,0,0,3,12,12,0,3,10,5,55,8,45,53,4,32,0,6,0,3,39,14,0,8,17,206,69,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269785342021702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060864937234787884,0.0,0.13693871316374032,0.0,0.26628802517017064,0.12516480368482652,0.0917061413896587,0.0,0.07967642063841716,0.0,0.0,0.08409077718776263,0.06882208787534784,0.1494621106583528,0.10912008784346117,0.0,0.07616024562683632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22545115365982316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125401575405072,0.09194397597857587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544373505480288,0.0,0.2312657548845864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257790237614924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07476806049332457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05911572036507975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843752244625445,0.0,0.18102111284138156,0.127881560879803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06914960041875792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05086647379095389,0.0,0.07158352311895379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527733862674101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902744697441368,0.0,0.0,0.059991804770619925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958145419526036,0.0,0.0,0.09341761446982763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19675347651510733,0.0,0.0,0.0947704860441711,0.0,0.09152262294671072,0.0,0.08745304258787935,0.08970526584904998,0.0,0.07920711473119303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423391711416621,0.08468966342921701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705931535372544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579481746555507,0.06636515291869444,0.06903003626326634,0.0,0.09518718696930924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189947083845204,0.0,0.0,0.1212987556219566,0.06807087234778574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204993541963536,0.07815034652025593,0.0935113210720368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960924549596844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670101018679633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252509444999737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458985418906666,0.0,0.0782293459931289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293989856176497,0.0,0.0,0.10437954323805287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317551625605404,0.0,0.0,0.0985746311212078,0.07384913987599352,0.2639551959952569,0.0,0.07179370503276576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515906589007689,0.09089438428682296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057636834694958575
mentalhealth,User5790,2020/01/23,"I’m ashamed to talk about my mental health issues. So many people don’t understand what it’s like, so I mostly hide it. Especially since I have no apparent reason for how I’m feeling. People want to know what is causing it. It’s just my broken brain, but that doesn’t seem to be an acceptable answer. Or they want to tell me what to do. Meditate, practice gratitude, take some supplement, etc, etc. I’ve tried most of that and I don’t feel like explaining everything I’ve tried over and over. Or worse are the people that think I just need to buck up and deal with it, just overcome it, as if it’s that easy. Too many people see mental health as more of a personal problem than an actual illness. I wish I could tell my employer, hey I need to go home early today because I’m getting overwhelmed and I feel a melt down coming on. But I would never do that. I’d feel embarrassed to admit it, and they wouldn’t understand anyway. So I go through my day, smile through the pain, answer “Im fine” when someone says “how are you?”. I’d have to fake a “real” illness if I needed to leave. So I try to have my meltdowns in private and keep it all to myself, but it’s hard and it’s lonely.",1.4645987654320969,3.538159786008229,3.2665689300411564,89.67664351851855,80.76954732510288,6.3545267489711925,22.059156378600825,7.492282038375204,0.8699576131687241,920,29,194,14,24,307,132,243,0.158,0.716,0.127,-0.8725,2,2,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,2,0,13,11,0,3,7,0,15,6,1,4,2,54,42,23,0,12,10,0,5,2,0,2,5,1,1,1,19,9,0,1,15,0,1,3,6,7,0,0,0,7,22,4,28,38,7,14,0,2,1,0,12,6,0,8,7,126,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.1100923693722679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877172845286933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12594022648370762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589334784896188,0.0,0.09718119521062013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007458202950296,0.0,0.0,0.07275713716582789,0.11630858237479867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516398426137007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139195569701122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22817310840919924,0.08059593932485906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05894182537147664,0.0,0.12823213001532044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106118531114723,0.0,0.0,0.23983676009369345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316388007116775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12186089089378,0.11775083656915873,0.0,0.10027625139349827,0.0,0.0,0.0620008512019622,0.0,0.0,0.11945610126205056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102326256529173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287559059034924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273844562022409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509554216161361,0.08701083371192593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004442594046826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31285028401508563,0.09850678304252744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794989871937374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840957165577035,0.0,0.1159938769373207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971599651338245,0.0,0.0,0.08989993125366216,0.10270366134994767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933227536649103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558882803288556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482376698669797,0.09067741460133864,0.1972127202611084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228808672190801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693659753246608,0.0,0.0,0.2297844500593865,0.0,0.0,0.23489135425219465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330838742633763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973310018308534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149693794845896,0.08014141499566213,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cdhgamer,2020/01/23,"My friend thinks they shouldn't be happy Hi all, I'm curious if anyone has input, possibly from personal experience or counseling someone in this type of situation. 

I have a friend who isn't on medication or therapy for depression, and they've dealt with a lot of trauma in their life as far as I can tell.

When they have a breakdown, they talk about how they've hurt people and pushed people away and that they don't deserve to be happy. Also lots of negative self image and self worth comments. I do my best to listen and I try to offer thoughts sparingly on how they're not alone in having hurt people but they deserve to be happy nonetheless, but is there anything I can do better? Is that too smothering to say? 

Also for my own mental health where should my boundary be in trying to help?

Thanks all",4.401666666666671,6.018921050955419,5.371098726114654,79.85732749469216,70.97452229299363,8.545435244161357,26.459129511677283,9.075114841892004,2.171068365180468,643,21,119,13,12,211,96,157,0.131,0.733,0.136,0.2418,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,6,2,10,13,1,0,3,0,18,3,0,2,2,22,23,17,0,3,6,0,0,0,2,2,3,2,0,3,4,6,0,0,2,0,1,1,5,5,0,0,1,2,15,8,23,16,6,11,0,3,0,0,20,9,0,5,1,89,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198590899628385,0.0,0.2192647558329521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585787464230316,0.0,0.11281498874603273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12880239397867702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14386953710361644,0.12124668362092265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807709030091475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410222690520138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118337913970688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4378107701266626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14572232553723316,0.0,0.0,0.09188984014624796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935195224539245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683209418717097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331013363067393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810571056138365,0.13815643496795624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851268770090904,0.11970339743199555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15455056817673335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902101616710562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860335920235532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540970887438212,0.0,0.0,0.11615755909051766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018931146542273,0.1198244014418214,0.12621584295550387,0.1567765854017593,0.0,0.0,0.0878429820486106,0.0,0.10883569004812517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861528617596237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sweaty-Bobcat,2020/01/23,"I need help. I don’t really know how to start this so I’m just gonna jump in.

I self harmed in the past (about a year clean) but that was the worst mistake I have ever made, it feels like I opened a door when I started that because now I know I can hurt myself and how easy it would be to kill myself. I’ve been staying up till 5am every night and sleeping till 12pm. I feel like I have no use in life and I’ll never go anywhere because my parents decided they didn’t want to enroll me in school when I was little. I’ve never left the house I’m not even allowed to walk down the sidewalk. I live in a good neighborhood and have overall been a trustworthy child. Sorry about that I guess I’m rambaling a bit.
I need help. I’m suicidal and overall hate myself. I’ve tried to figure out how to fix this on my own but I just can’t. I need a therapist I know but my family cannot afford one. It’s honestly getting too hard for me. If something doesn’t change soon I don’t know how I’ll live. I need options please.",0.4293788564376797,2.272327809954753,2.530442204853969,94.81261929247226,83.11764705882355,5.6471410941999185,20.000205676676266,6.782984794422108,0.14640995475113086,790,22,185,9,22,266,125,221,0.171,0.6859999999999999,0.14400000000000002,-0.8481,3,0,1,0,0,3,18.0,0,0,1,0,16,10,2,0,10,0,16,2,1,7,3,41,40,18,2,8,7,1,3,2,0,2,1,0,2,2,8,7,0,0,8,0,0,3,10,6,0,1,6,3,28,4,20,31,3,30,0,1,0,0,6,12,0,3,16,112,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561267671726928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13934656035217066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350230355473192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843030432240519,0.11545498549336285,0.10753968827806072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032481632595893,0.0,0.12907421753543893,0.18236781498779786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668507119857517,0.0,0.07253905580734445,0.10705587069417588,0.0,0.0,0.14060655959496107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143376930628203,0.12601512543188098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17110479850141402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472759759729285,0.1366380621235652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412114437384752,0.0,0.28058385709757216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867798793877592,0.0,0.09015379686152578,0.12471399458266412,0.1279258183372274,0.2254116415566977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077322770680672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3785649110269765,0.1968830657876112,0.0,0.0,0.11977869020550808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649014318923898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14172579796458307,0.0,0.12184397120876912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010711145026036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176753877387823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12917547123436796,0.0,0.0,0.13315324101645018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277291907893129,0.0,0.0,0.0982612082837978,0.0,0.14287918610630973,0.18068426930001635,0.13604407306923638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13961417574893112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819640955827265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08665715342182624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11023739831937694,0.0,0.0,0.07528361714880108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066967185455528,0.0,0.0,0.08219405154126927
mentalhealth,Hot_Mumma69,2020/01/23,"I don’t know what to do anymore I’m not after advice I just need to get this off my chest as no one that knows me would accept me if they new I know deep down, I need to go check myself into a mental facility before I seriously hurt someone. I know I'll get disowned by all my family and friends once they find out, so I'll have absolutely no support system once I'm in there and when I get out. My horrible thoughts are getting out of control. 
I've had really bad thoughts about hurting people not just hurting them a little either. I mean there's one particular person who I can't stand whenever she's around I visualise how her murder would go down and how I would destroy all evidence, and rid of the body so I wouldn't get done the murder. I've caught myself grabbing a knife and going to stab her when she's got her back turned to me. I've had to stop myself a few times 
I'm considering committing a somewhat bad crime(not hurt anyone of course) so I'll get locked up for a while so I can't hurt anyone. I really don't want to be this disturbed monster anymore I just want to be normal",3.178612894939633,4.3153827205240205,4.812874389930645,84.5492525044953,73.32314410480349,7.658977652196251,25.69766247110197,8.124751697461798,1.4627408682250191,869,28,182,13,17,294,124,229,0.245,0.713,0.042,-0.9931,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,3,1,16,15,3,1,8,0,16,2,2,3,3,43,43,16,2,10,7,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,5,10,0,2,9,0,1,4,9,12,0,2,7,1,32,3,26,30,5,26,0,5,0,0,11,12,0,2,8,119,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095273088811753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20491029063508334,0.14447264170413382,0.0,0.0,0.09196725143393772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943853663512676,0.1725180348291914,0.0,0.0,0.08790867364160321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475343221339684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587025471541147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572136441993492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739088956012014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442290209620947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981657104212221,0.0,0.3238493239906016,0.0,0.17613930497405664,0.0,0.08262594901299647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5529741421726172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.227104534819446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354313952840864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253420145952236,0.0,0.0,0.10411155683727998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320519310533492,0.0,0.09977684337066813,0.0,0.0,0.10122125815275494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22004223698671035,0.1400102196800926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162171651879777,0.0902057661537608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132365268969234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753370277784775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637126791855508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723426062852407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16403221656664888,0.060240530514651676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11237093986105393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218690984503661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22016405927729435,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,awaycanttakeit,2020/01/23,"I dont feel fit for this world Been wanting to vent for a while, but kept putting it off. 

I just don't feel fit for this world. I'd wish I'd just disappear in a way. Escape from this reality and never return. I don't think I want to kill myself, I just don't want to be alive. 

For the entirety of my life (since 3 yrs old) I've had a problem where I'd get sick/nauseous at night. As I got older I thought it was going away and eventually I wouldn't have this be a huge concern. But before my senior year in hs, it came back hard. I had trouble eating and I ended up losing weight. I'm already underweight and had been trying to gain weight, and this scared me. Eventually it passed to a degree, and I was able to eat normally again.

But since the start of college, its come back again and it's so much worse. Last quarter I was constantly throwing away my food and shifting the food in our family dish so when my parents came home they didn't ask too many questions. I frequently felt ill at school and am too afraid to eat there. I'm so consumed by this fear of vomiting and feelings of nausea that I cannot shake off to the point where I can't bring myself to eat. I lost 5 pounds in 5ish weeks, something that took me fucking months to gain. 

On top of this I'm so socially inept. I don't know what to say and feel I need to script everything before approaching a conversation, but even then it doesn't work. It took me 30 minutes to enter a room where I had prearranged a meeting with a teacher. 

How can I function in a world I cannot handle? How can I expect myself to make it any farther in my college years or life like this? Undoubtedly the work will become harder. I have to make buddy with my professors if I ever have any hopes of grad school. How can I even imagine handling that when an upcoming quiz or test throws my body out of wack? I can't see myself living past 25 or so (18 now). I always imagine I somehow end up on the streets one way or another. 

Everything just seems so stressful. I'm not built for this. My parents won't allow me to go anywhere when schools around and even during breaks its hard getting out with my friends. I've only done this twice in my life. I don't have a life and I can't see myself making one anytime soon. 

I just want to die off and be free and I hate it but I also don't and I don't know what to think anymore. I should probably be seeing a therapist but my mom has problems with it. 

I can't take this anymore. I know I'm not eating enough but I can't force myself to eat. The world is just a big bundle of stress and I can't handle it, nor do I want to. I don't feel I can do this any longer and I don't know how to feel about it.",1.0419073395956069,2.9224664816112096,2.821430982327655,93.32547556121638,81.20665499124344,5.763935679032001,21.064830441012575,6.823360437735567,0.3056210858143609,2095,61,475,23,55,695,256,571,0.141,0.787,0.07200000000000001,-0.9894,2,2,1,0,0,3,51.0,1,0,1,7,39,18,3,6,21,0,51,19,1,8,3,93,103,48,2,15,20,3,11,1,1,4,6,1,2,0,31,28,11,1,18,0,1,16,26,14,0,4,20,15,66,5,63,75,2,85,0,2,3,1,12,37,1,9,30,311,97,12,0.06710554219373359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405263449580013,0.05366427784776413,0.05583718681808965,0.0,0.0,0.13690220951649765,0.07036601203013959,0.0,0.0,0.13310133211818925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05973815975355287,0.06273462336881704,0.0,0.12609573174076205,0.10320003953812801,0.0,0.0,0.0741127991382896,0.11420374770028473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453912951564749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350172629842085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780548266911983,0.0,0.07251725143080956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696449581983217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06867226821080219,0.07864719567505611,0.0,0.0,0.4119943354869831,0.0,0.0,0.11887118480695502,0.06933796352827025,0.0,0.13296773319455865,0.060700804779026875,0.0,0.0,0.12062026866677693,0.0,0.06326113293993849,0.07551239141920689,0.20358347057454865,0.0,0.0644318440602783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16228857597731022,0.0,0.05184557543638385,0.06203799243380581,0.07011975223422319,0.0,0.07627525215305103,0.0,0.05367043230027256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022676986763002,0.06625283001300035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731233027178675,0.06665094485073453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424233992412978,0.0,0.14751780411254042,0.05469997334529977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895945159923514,0.03278437828399406,0.0,0.05925542318759228,0.0,0.0,0.07507393678186645,0.07325362638140874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438041149217633,0.0680344871531178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859319997703619,0.053563003554821284,0.0,0.04933029477503975,0.04975790924541578,0.051755931065259685,0.0,0.0,0.06297400549472201,0.06574918349417491,0.0,0.0,0.0704159781650985,0.0,0.09094490419111234,0.05103678872987727,0.0,0.0,0.14902552640127456,0.0,0.06405983317428972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343642780117191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235112433887307,0.1284218821559435,0.0,0.06745960457982478,0.07517356508178158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05336502057170008,0.06718435439241413,0.2037431738819176,0.16042328683370816,0.06109036530527012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102079590439083,0.0,0.0,0.0684056494663131,0.0,0.0516611248609008,0.0,0.0,0.0474976481550548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373834371392295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050455016341918686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791470664613742,0.0,0.0859970436694204,0.0,0.05327430474002312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911345302069814,0.0455602582260672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979029371525526,0.106530511775006,0.053828018203906286,0.16343294410728887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716806176330081,0.0,0.0,0.09770726788037648,0.0,0.06838628048227208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.086427538062281
mentalhealth,SneakieSnek,2020/01/23,"How to tell my parents Hey everyone. I need some help.

So I've recently been unofficially diagnosed with clinical depression and I don't know how to tell my parents.

So far I've said the words, ""clinical depression"" to them but I was met with confusion and ""What?! No you don't!"" and since then they've acted like it never even happened. I just want help. I don't want to feel this way anymore and they won't seem to listen.

I've had breakdowns, panic attacks, and long depressive episodes with no one to up until a couple of weeks ago, to talk to. I've done therapy, meds, diaries, pushing my feelings, and talking it out with friends. Since then, I've gone through 4 therapists, tons of meds, discontinued diaries, pushed my feelings til they've burst, and I've lost all my friends. I'm drowning and my parents can't even see it. 

Without getting into the gory details I just wanted to say that I've had suicidal thoughts and self-harmed. They don't know any of this. How do I tell them and how can I let them help me? 

Any advice is greatly appreciated.",3.2055072463768117,5.202603198067639,4.229299516908213,85.22336956521742,74.9903381642512,7.498550724637681,29.85748792270532,8.344100000000001,2.224418357487924,830,38,165,15,18,269,114,207,0.156,0.718,0.126,-0.825,3,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,5,1,12,11,1,2,3,0,15,3,0,4,2,40,35,21,2,4,4,3,3,1,2,1,3,3,0,0,7,16,0,0,7,0,0,4,10,7,0,1,10,7,21,4,23,23,3,18,0,4,1,0,24,4,0,3,10,99,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920935948620958,0.09906739094527932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519995681284852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083465199763352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714171497493487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365893394493888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887729492742633,0.11343278127427403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436800560754536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14763120399573235,0.0,0.0,0.10679027732048813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952574970147136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726890698886819,0.0,0.05838933550371547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232144191634788,0.0,0.0,0.09882789573811808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22472860806231315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283937524945428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428089630835135,0.0,0.054599681314063904,0.0,0.0,0.09890297911096396,0.0,0.0,0.12199788023667088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24827755961863365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286769888145754,0.0861952396289752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573062302659385,0.0,0.0,0.1311248162788191,0.3722846066510304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034828540769223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10630816611496724,0.0888750456480615,0.0,0.0,0.08905725628021098,0.10174097090186256,0.11658875252550854,0.0,0.0,0.18489598988591785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224593604472625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17965490381060545,0.2930462269284933,0.0,0.12780587334437873,0.12976052544619454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872396590341006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977546233644212,0.08870889578496594,0.08964613006359143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773144928015058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nae-7,2020/01/23,"First Time On Meds Hi. I was recently diagnosed with severe major depressive disorder and was prescribed medication. i’m not handling the side effects well, mainly with the nausea and lack of appetite due to that. this is my first time on medication, and would like some tips on how to deal with nausea from meds, and what you guys do when you feel this sick. today was day 1 and i hear the first week is the worst, but i have a sensitive stomach and nausea is unbearable for me :-(",5.691014492753624,6.555931869565223,6.037826086956525,79.08471014492756,67.26086956521739,9.611594202898553,29.46376811594203,9.725611199111238,2.6449289855072458,380,13,72,8,6,122,63,92,0.159,0.807,0.034,-0.8761,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,4,3,4,0,0,5,0,9,5,1,2,0,17,12,9,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,1,4,1,0,1,4,9,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,3,3,2,7,2,11,8,5,15,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,1,12,54,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119180295390674,0.19052001966907406,0.15916741298438858,0.18756745451842066,0.0,0.0,0.21179607017984425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09344010608346487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4715707088363632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18298041477231472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082823029927712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09028362988679164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4105408449706601,0.3723318149592969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18246706791352524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20877066920253654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215515979103575,0.0,0.1751681797614598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482348950150321,0.0,0.16615681293715792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312761590720695,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayJS3,2020/01/23,"I don't know what I'm doing anymore 19F

I dropped out of an ivy league school because my grades were bad enough to get me kicked out if I stayed another semester. I realized just how much I hate school and I don't think I'll be transferring anywhere else. I went home and it didn't feel like home. It felt like there wasn't a place for me there anymore. Something about it just doesn't feel like home anymore. I feel like my mother and siblings are a family and I'm an outsider. 

All my friends are in college and as a new dropout, the divide seems to get bigger every day and they seem uninterested in talking to me because we don't have that much in common anymore. I'm broke and in debt. I got a job as a waitress. Less for the money and more to run away from my problems. Now I work 10hrs a day and bring home something less than a grocery trip's worth of money. 

My family is originally from another country. We can't afford frequent trips back home and we've only gone back once. I had school and I was very engrossed in trying to get into a good college and thus I didn't go back. Now that I want to, I can't even do it. I'm at a weird position where my home country is iffy about my dual citizenship with my new country and it's a pain to travel overseas with either sets of documents. I want to see my dad really bad. It's been 6 years. I don't even think he remembers what I look like. The rest of my family is going back but my documents are being blocked. I don't know what to do. It feels like I'll never see my dad again.

I feel like I don't know where I'm going with my life. I used to like writing but now I don't anymore. It's becoming painful to express myself and I dread putting any personal touch in my work. I tried out engineering and math and I failed so bad that I don't even have a college degree. I tried computer science and it went pretty well for a while. I even got an internship at a brand name company and felt like it was going to work out but I hated it and couldn't stand up to my competition. 

I have a lot of trouble with expressing myself emotionally. It makes me turn down romantic partners and friends. I'm a private person and it turns others away from me when I don't want to share about my life. I don't know why, but I prefer one night stands with no emotional attachments and very detached friendships. It hurts me a lot and I've lost friends and people I genuinely like for being so aloof. I've had pretty strong feelings for this one boy for nearly a year now and I just don't have the heart to tell him. I slept with him then pretty much disposed of him and now he hates me. 

I don't care about anything anymore. I've genuinely tried but it fails every time. It feels like a lack of self restraint when it comes to doing things that have consequences. I missed my finals and didn't care about failing classes. I sped into oncoming traffic and even when I was stopped by a cop, I didn't feel the need to apologize or try to explain it. It's hard to explain but it's like a feeling of being done with everything and everyone. It's freeing to speak my mind but at the same time, I'm afraid I'll go to far. 

I'm quite patient with others but I have anger issues. I can't relax my brow. I've punched holes through walls. I can't stop myself from being inwardly enraged by small things. I don't know how to let it go. 

I have crippling depression. I couldn't get out of bed for the better parts of October, November and December of last year. I don't feel comfortable telling my friends about it. My mom and I have never been close and she's a very church type so I didn't want to tell her. I was afraid to go home for Christmas because my family would see just how sickly I was. Therapy and medication worked for a while then just didn't. I came home and it went away for a while then came back. I found a job and now I work really long hours every day so I won't feel it but the truth is, I can't do this forever. 

 I think I am going crazy. I feel like I am slowly losing my mind. Sometimes, I can't tell the difference between reality and my imagination. I'm forgetting things that happened and remembering things that never happened very vividly. I am in a lot of pain all the time. Recently, I've began to go into bursts of uncontrollable crazy sounding laughter then just stop suddenly. Sometimes I can't tell if I just laughed or not but I'll see people look at me weirdly when I'm in public. I get very sudden mood swings sometimes. I have suicidal and murderous thoughts almost habitually. I've lost all sense of consequence, time and logic. I can't reason with myself anymore. I know it's wrong but I don't see the problem in things like getting kicked out of school or getting into head on collisions. I don't notice day or night anymore. I go days without a proper meal. It feels like mental masochism but I don't know how to stop it. 

I don't feel alive.",1.8333450328407217,3.842707225615765,3.379348830049264,89.66585411535307,79.20689655172414,6.554289819376027,23.873409277504106,7.607628322730582,1.0815404351395732,3874,135,826,59,96,1277,363,1015,0.18100000000000002,0.73,0.09,-0.9982,4,1,2,0,0,0,81.0,2,0,1,15,47,64,6,4,40,0,79,11,3,9,7,172,176,78,2,14,28,4,18,15,5,2,7,2,9,5,46,64,1,5,39,2,5,23,43,32,1,2,34,28,119,32,108,132,18,124,1,10,8,0,39,38,0,12,73,522,165,24,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03697071999344196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02510732313615791,0.07742908787592312,0.0,0.0,0.2929230872588719,0.0,0.0,0.030382567346846506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406456056034917,0.1419485895899187,0.09248165724140336,0.0675194971999201,0.040775981696613145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03265333420355475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08445482635548154,0.07528617181254472,0.0,0.0,0.03180388989062161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905389587789153,0.0,0.03179972083552929,0.0,0.0,0.03857424424817649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03778266620862112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03084248403688088,0.08306157359855584,0.0,0.038148923864467436,0.0,0.12192877878994007,0.0,0.09332177602424087,0.035279284454531844,0.033181919483432465,0.0,0.13922209544684452,0.0,0.2613548166434675,0.21100908457556566,0.07089927042638411,0.040444791688821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040481611357863816,0.11409927891670525,0.0,0.13502669153252844,0.0,0.20982868828729145,0.030967308122776017,0.05905766859626225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529765692665672,0.0,0.03307367030098212,0.10935456015841713,0.03789126125571255,0.0,0.0,0.043751174281913566,0.0,0.0,0.2962755560747101,0.0,0.03635942497970361,0.0,0.039524343164392656,0.0,0.0,0.03853558944873784,0.07327614034165364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14203445104115905,0.030095275551140725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03775388874102754,0.05215632524860515,0.270563632271244,0.0,0.0,0.032673633040438764,0.06200813181981098,0.04130478821071185,0.08060655010385824,0.09416590553746536,0.0,0.0,0.02464483536401476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037193692954766065,0.037207353707791435,0.0,0.07455870797270574,0.04324104501520848,0.0,0.0,0.08142282656531064,0.027376210590386245,0.08542649538321995,0.07131643048891605,0.0,0.06929509950430572,0.0,0.0,0.04203442996869183,0.0,0.039319310895591916,0.05003680594734337,0.028079834890870046,0.11785859485425353,0.0,0.0,0.03998149006171614,0.0,0.05119229066642589,0.064475413675948,0.03857424424817649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268479043985928,0.0,0.07065619403288691,0.0,0.03711547308414315,0.0,0.03926967950309843,0.0,0.0,0.04730465599378805,0.037960600115131284,0.03645470962009526,0.0,0.08364784861663085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14946276532734173,0.1471049779007796,0.0672223865915259,0.03851631316774666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05684667442728442,0.1095464664916918,0.0,0.0,0.03935252407639978,0.0,0.12346934051361202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040385222881193776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029675437756213775,0.16135147408458772,0.0,0.04222200628943546,0.0,0.12264227017056728,0.07097182779624915,0.0,0.02931088962009899,0.08611496339092521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253335643181294,0.08031817855575595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0318876065205367,0.0,0.15231710590955275,0.08710707609875554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03319611827102525,0.1026774989686874,0.0333151639859302,0.0,0.0,0.03559021045003154,0.0,0.13439344529688535,0.0,0.0,0.02622738620035115,0.04036695910847287,0.0,0.07132710714788362
mentalhealth,alibetches,2020/01/23,Struggling with ptsd like symptoms after a family members suicide My brother committed suicide last month it happened a week before Christmas and we just buried him a week ago. Since then I haven’t been able to sleep I have night mares regarding his death and am I’m a constant state of high anxiety. I fear going to bed because I feel that I woll get a call at 3am saying someone passed away  I am currently seeing a therapist I was wondering if any one had advice for getting a better nights sleep or just with coping with a death of a loved one,3.7588888888888894,5.688537851851858,4.604814814814816,83.4216666666667,73.25925925925927,7.392592592592592,28.66666666666667,8.167268648758528,2.0947333333333336,440,18,81,7,9,142,79,108,0.215,0.685,0.1,-0.9337,1,0,0,0,0,2,2.0,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,2,9,0,7,4,2,0,1,13,16,5,4,1,4,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,6,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,2,3,3,11,3,11,13,0,17,0,0,1,1,7,3,0,3,12,49,13,0,0.15376230254553713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502547424694848,0.13630100372016524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456363846499074,0.0,0.11762774058140628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444647447870147,0.0,0.0,0.09373207246166536,0.0,0.13084039433754227,0.0,0.0,0.13599026124054986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700850255503845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16616242399299422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495341434544884,0.17302533882844268,0.07774684020727914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16066891355008744,0.0,0.08738665999028143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359714963332161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162458314775578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12533679895575314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512049418984604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13877648132844894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227316029139125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28859100958990475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20838663120904696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17973990330713138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227795455113395,0.0,0.0,0.12252864745637235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12719376560146006,0.0,0.3077466956830547,0.0,0.13028229996930196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607457439957381,0.0,0.33638200470649,0.0,0.0,0.15981790687894354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17852988448380194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24667768860583356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667486580499459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eggshellsanddeath,2020/01/23,"Worried about a friend who is struggling against a relapse into self-harm They have self-harmed once before and are working against it, but they confided to me yesterday that they are struggling to keep it up. They do not feel safe confiding to their parents and the school counselors we have are not the best. They have asked me not to contact any authorities. They have confided in me once before, and I do my best to respond calmly and non-judgmentally, just letting them rant and doing my best to console them. However, I feel terrible about not being able to do enough to help and I'm constantly scared of doing or saying the wrong thing that might push them over the edge.

They tell me they constantly hide their emotions behind a fake smile, and this has been bugging me for some time. I've been wondering if they are ever happy, or if everything I thought I knew about them is a lie. I don't know if I am friends with them, or with their ""fake self"", which they explicitly hate having to put up as a facade. I thought I could cheer them up but now I don't know if it ever really worked. Are they constantly sad? I can't imagine what they put up with everyday and I just wish I could fix it somehow. I feel bad that I like their ""fake self"" and I hate that I am annoyed by their ""real self"". Of course I would never leave their side, especially not with what they are going through, but some small part of me can't help but feel annoyed that I have to deal with their emotions and problems, and then I feel ashamed and guilty on top of feeling worried and scared and sad.

I just don't know what to do, about their situation, about how I can deal with my emotions, and I generally feel lost. Reddit, have any of you gone through something similar and can offer some insight? What should/can I do to help them, and help me keep my sanity through this? I would really appreciate it. Thank you.",5.968772359715757,6.122584770889487,5.840187454055378,83.22730396961529,66.52021563342318,9.225238912031363,31.149350649350648,8.97023862654752,2.3087778975741244,1494,53,305,23,22,467,162,371,0.235,0.64,0.125,-0.995,2,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,1,2,28,7,14,30,4,5,9,0,41,0,0,1,4,81,66,31,0,10,19,1,7,1,2,3,0,1,0,3,19,25,0,3,16,0,0,5,11,19,0,0,7,8,66,11,45,52,8,27,0,3,0,0,50,11,0,13,12,231,85,3,0.07892347347511218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734133672860302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378279381344954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589780371602927,0.0,0.0,0.1343161258776552,0.0,0.24847594866228884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25586471024692753,0.0,0.1260279430167826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16273327126949955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663348545511631,0.0,0.08154904567409564,0.0,0.0,0.1427816004247367,0.0,0.0,0.07093132894448352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27934255701842403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195215965746176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04485402876806622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401550509028287,0.0,0.15584118095898292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21160296253978936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403016190784772,0.0,0.0,0.13012283098433206,0.0,0.0,0.08356856276018958,0.0,0.08070459885722807,0.0,0.038558022561308934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615429440951254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372533318400094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060870648221812575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681018469349347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763517733073274,0.08546643073720178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755191052677692,0.0,0.15867977930426536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983219136194416,0.10112079611839024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276311386368152,0.15803233051971022,0.07987476867996694,0.0,0.0,0.4116719770226462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871329094993756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060759145733189586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650159011988993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689825945101552,0.07266213067281067,0.0,0.0,0.05243324884993575,0.0,0.0,0.12531284420340735,0.04602091206909901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907580995041929,0.0,0.08558914033378222,0.1149144573278282,0.16030123670109306,0.0,0.11212994226328432,0.08629042863060482,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yonasnipers,2020/01/23,"I’m scared to talk about my mother’s cancer My mother has recently been diagnosed with cancer, aggressive breast cancer that’s been eating at her breast for lord knows how long. It didn’t feel so scary when signs came up, or when we all assumed so without actually being diagnosed, but something about hearing it shut my expressions down. She has cancer and I don’t know how to talk to her about it. She cried while confirming it to us & I just couldn’t give any expression, I feel like it makes her think that I’m pushing to over my shoulder like it’s not happening but I’m just so scared to talk about it. I hate that I feel like it’s my pride that won’t let me cry in front of the parents that raised us to be tough in all the wrong ways, but I can’t cry about it at all. I think I just haven’t processed it. I don’t know how to, & I don’t think I’m ready to.",2.533502304147465,3.594874301075272,3.611858678955453,92.83064516129036,74.80645161290323,7.249769585253457,22.425499231950845,7.7094869923839395,0.6376079877112137,684,17,161,9,14,221,91,186,0.228,0.693,0.079,-0.9840000000000001,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,3,0,0,1,17,10,2,2,2,0,15,10,3,4,3,32,34,14,0,1,9,3,3,3,0,1,6,1,0,0,15,4,1,0,10,0,0,3,10,6,0,0,4,4,24,4,25,25,3,17,1,0,0,2,18,8,0,2,8,102,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.1222323210617582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714308319393539,0.0,0.08517874695579175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14326012064920055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4127653047204857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542655164516184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816871755980075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19000042058154268,0.17896660391636035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015749305222224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076395054142213,0.0,0.0,0.12366490787942427,0.0,0.0,0.1411732314493515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20651316690063592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808330534599585,0.0,0.183582065230064,0.0,0.0,0.11084810219652184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836097175256174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908257194809706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367572875999296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25080730876692203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642860909665484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.302029402704261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24077801237762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3013364063896709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942281652284872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074284118567792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694837066575355,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,promark20,2020/01/23,"Why can't I just feel even okay or accepting of myself? I don't like myself, I tolerate my existence.",1.7628571428571431,3.7807921904761934,4.800238095238097,79.3489285714286,79.47619047619048,9.914285714285716,24.785714285714285,10.125756701596842,3.006314285714286,80,3,16,3,2,29,17,21,0.10800000000000001,0.6629999999999999,0.22899999999999998,0.3378,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,6,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,12,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.500025145804228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3827878091612649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3698569526089943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6831209126704934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heavcnlyc,2020/01/23,"i don't know what to do My sister and I have a 5 year age gap so i've always looked up to her and wanted to be like her. She's struggled with a lot of mental illnesses (BPD, anxiety and depression and a few others) i don't know much about what she has but she has crazy mood swings. usually it's different every day or every other day and since i was younger she's just made me feel bad about myself? just saying mean things to me since i've been like 5 years old and hitting me. (i still flinch is someone moves too fast, sometimes i hit them out of reflex) I know she loves me and and i love her but i just can't handle it anymore. I'm scared of what she'll say and she judges me constantly, i can't even write a fucking diary or else she'll find it and make fun of me, post on social media because she'll make fun of me, i just can't do anything right. she makes me feel like i hate her then i love her, i know she doesn't mean it but it's driving me insane and i just want someone to actually realise how much she makes me feel like shit. I don't have much family (i only know like 12 people in my family lol) and i don't have anyone to talk to, my mom just ignores my mental health and makes me feel like i don't deserve help or that i'm just over exaggerating when i'm not. She doesn't believe anything i'm saying and thinks she can solve my ignoring everything wrong. I have no one and i feel so useless. i need advice? or reassurance? just anything. please.",0.2203809523809533,2.321844561904765,2.3047619047619072,94.56857142857146,85.92063492063492,5.2507936507936535,18.206349206349206,6.610729790773281,-0.10775555555555584,1147,29,263,13,35,384,148,315,0.16399999999999998,0.6809999999999999,0.155,-0.2147,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,0,17,24,3,2,4,1,26,7,1,7,0,61,60,27,0,3,16,2,5,6,0,3,2,3,0,0,12,17,0,2,14,0,0,2,12,11,0,1,3,9,59,12,20,51,5,21,0,2,1,4,33,6,2,5,18,164,71,0,0.0,0.0,0.08690227488477642,0.0,0.0,0.08702095304473409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409871226226981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812482535765259,0.0,0.08831602980359411,0.0622674932088633,0.0,0.21984755780830234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435501583844678,0.05428550302250012,0.0,0.0,0.10033153472226504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11215835255726338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09623398408892248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486283327111045,0.0,0.0767006826081857,0.0,0.0,0.09304078108837814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439183479616418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588182557396669,0.0,0.1500609383813658,0.0,0.08003453513923796,0.0,0.16790131287857302,0.0,0.22513778999115805,0.19085710972726014,0.0,0.0,0.08139226009416364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232748841122084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879207866200009,0.0,0.0946585134463755,0.0,0.0,0.05968993177264705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24470428990514004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610389618385358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478156903383867,0.0,0.0,0.07570914715989006,0.24111974371489095,0.084263513179288,0.2972157688054786,0.0,0.0,0.19400829229649685,0.0,0.0,0.17948770319035492,0.0,0.0,0.1042970687230743,0.0,0.09464858452604302,0.19639123279565399,0.0660312098451514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09344549039908848,0.0,0.0603441959686418,0.06772834625795024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617377061059688,0.0,0.0,0.09775276902312688,0.0,0.0,0.08528756169136117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605024416520986,0.0,0.2124540756554433,0.08915696560552798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141098621236128,0.14733009450580864,0.0,0.0,0.09077768465362386,0.15090758164243734,0.0,0.08807507882102504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111734403630901,0.0,0.0,0.09309688074061848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157692812369744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05916244288654286,0.057061167990306076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807861304783252,0.0,0.10505079952326132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736479557321416,0.0,0.11469362336031162
mentalhealth,192095,2020/01/23,"I don’t know what I could have This is the first time I address this anywhere.
I have come to point where the internet is filling me with these undiagnosed mental health illnesses. I watch a certain video or hear an experience and I relate to some of the symptoms. Which I am aware is not healthy.  

Now asking here is not probably a good thing either but my parents don’t believe in psychiatrists or psychologists. And they are quite expensive here so I just want an opinion.

So… I will describe all the things that I have going on. 

First when it comes to anxiety, I have it I know. I panic. I can't breathe and my copying mechanism for it, is to just not approach or think of my triggers.

Depression is a thing that comes and goes. I do not like to call it that name anymore, because it was way worse on my teenage years. Now it’s a feeling of coming and going. The first half of the year I normally do great in mood and positivity but the other next half I’m just overwhelmed about everything. I constantly fight about it cause it has pushed me back from finishing college so I’m figuring it out as I go.

So those two are a basic. I know they are most likely real.

Here is the main point of this post.

I have this world on my mind. Entirely fictional. It’s a story that has been there since I was around 10 or 11 years old. And it hasn’t left my mind in all these years (23). I created characters but I have a strange behavior with it. Which I don’t think is normal. 

These characters have evolved, and grown with me like a favorite show. I am attached to them. 

And I talk out loud like them, whenever I’m alone or at night it’s like I become them and enter their world. And it has happened to me that I talk it out when I’m walking on the street. 

And I have gotten used to live with it. And aside from walking and talking to myself. I can manage it. I can sleep at someone else's house and not think about it. But it’s not normal and I can’t stop it.

The best way to describe this is that it’s like I have my own little dollhouse and I’m grabbing each doll and make them talk. But I don’t do it physically. It's all internally and out loud when I’m alone and only verbally. 

And this is where the confusion comes in.
I do believe and feel that I dissociate from myself when I’m in character. I lose track of time, I lose the sense of what I’m doing. But I, to some extent feel that I am me and in control.

Like I said I googled things and stumble across DID (dissociative identity disorder) but I don’t forget buying things, or end in places I don’t recall going to. Or had a very significant trauma, according to me. I don’t know if there are levels of this, or other similar disorders where I am to extent aware.

An example is I am walking my dog and talking the characters in low voice at the park. And I go on, unaware of stumbling upon rocks or stepping over something and or listening that someone is calling me. But when I get to a crossing on the street I go back to myself, cross and then back to them

I mentally become those characters but I don’t believe I’m in another world. I can picture it but I don’t smell it or touch. It’s mainly just the characters. I know their voices, their faces, their attitude and I feel comfortable with them. And when I talk with their voice I don’t think “This is me doing a voice”. I’m just them. 

And when I have come to that realization, I feel out of my body. That tingling sensation of ”why do I exist”. (Writing this is actually giving me that feeling.)

So yeah, again it's the first time I write this anywhere. I don’t know if this is a copying mechanism for my life. And I project these characters having sort of the life I wished I had.

Or maybe they are personalities that are in another ‘place’. Or that I’m not accepting them being a full part of me due to me having all the other problems and wanting to be normal.

I’m so confused about terminology and I have not found something that correlates completely with these “symptoms” except for DID because it’s different people on a same brain in a sort of way.

All I know is. I dissociate. I feel these characters have something of me and I am some of them. I feel they are mine. I even considered maybe this is good idea and I should write about the world I picture them in. But it's not that feeling or wanting others to know. 

Again I don’t know what I'm looking for by posting this here. I just want an opinion.",1.8001903630296283,3.926363929922141,3.4493769592476475,88.52792123824453,79.88987764182427,6.800490443927598,24.34271665486905,7.885392088572588,1.3230221357063403,3459,127,730,61,88,1147,307,899,0.096,0.846,0.057,-0.9839,2,2,3,0,1,0,90.0,0,0,19,9,42,26,1,4,39,1,84,12,5,5,6,169,148,77,0,14,44,1,11,7,0,2,7,9,1,1,80,56,0,2,26,3,2,23,24,11,0,7,10,23,122,14,90,133,20,111,0,5,2,0,39,49,0,26,41,548,202,3,0.0,0.0,0.05409934522740887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148337881829531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626284024161672,0.04240980400647964,0.0,0.054979451249046116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04935144058455829,0.051826906797152926,0.0,0.0,0.12788485552453974,0.0,0.067588798400311,0.122453501022387,0.0,0.1873784204613417,0.058178604012629885,0.0,0.0,0.06157895450231692,0.0,0.06188697572237387,0.11321648767200065,0.0,0.0,0.05694994367539258,0.0,0.2865287971885121,0.058125531656318126,0.059908621894403526,0.06217826347907009,0.04426261272433051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047748539530178144,0.0,0.0,0.057920754583257815,0.12707315950797754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046311210587688265,0.0,0.0491014808492455,0.0,0.0,0.03661617750689853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04982396551015168,0.05422885562431852,0.0,0.0,0.25227938708290554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886216297666885,0.0,0.06078474179580313,0.0,0.0,0.028963988851241806,0.053181037894288116,0.1890396485378656,0.09299727778688636,0.0,0.061120426053421065,0.0,0.0,0.049023508242672036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05892784284920816,0.0624824867817781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063967836420737,0.0,0.0625825854644432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27420473602521744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06023338693919208,0.0,0.07831478681093901,0.1895889348720008,0.05556329039631598,0.048952637791648684,0.0,0.04655383216576375,0.12404154884663368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03700519579022917,0.0,0.11138954466116732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117366286652956,0.0,0.11195285120164146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058958783094004576,0.05202466737117031,0.21726929226359445,0.0,0.0,0.05817269860596488,0.0,0.0,0.042162983543854365,0.0,0.06504437298450118,0.06155717251850577,0.06003378987385071,0.0,0.038433625363703934,0.048406192849198164,0.11584150916651563,0.0,0.10481337592057187,0.0,0.10618827296897757,0.0,0.05977137944600853,0.05304653602590476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058964978145221274,0.0,0.0631004109287444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273409110733827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0458587629358641,0.0,0.05547788720181862,0.0,0.09394462190468826,0.12803629763398733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04634852548526392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524230719659342,0.0,0.2673530664196468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841522230838996,0.14208934485453925,0.0,0.0,0.09697876959859944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05415472464939818,0.0,0.0,0.047880503364905416,0.0,0.04574203270689535,0.13079472263204964,0.13201195627709594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05002403740473209,0.0,0.06375079230509048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564959059994992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280063286672082
mentalhealth,justinhveld,2020/01/23,"The worst part about the end of a relationship Hi guys,

I just wanted to get this off my chest. I had recently broken up with my girlfriend of almost three years about 2-3 months ago. While a lot in my life has stayed the same (work, dogs, and all things), my life has literally changed completely. It’s not the heartbreak that hurts the most but it is the realization that you have lost your bestfriend in the whole world. 
Someone you use to call and talk to everyday.
Someone who would take care of you when you were sick.
Someone who would tell you that everything would be okay.
Someone who would be there for you when you needed them the most.
I have honestly never felt so scared and alone but the person who I could turn to is now gone.",3.614080459770115,5.472751000000002,3.5266379310344824,91.30007183908049,73.48275862068967,7.040229885057474,23.117816091954023,7.793537801064563,0.8476781609195405,585,16,124,8,12,177,95,145,0.13699999999999998,0.782,0.081,-0.8398,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,8,1,2,8,8,0,1,11,1,15,4,1,1,2,24,25,9,0,7,4,0,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,2,11,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,5,1,17,3,15,13,8,18,0,3,0,0,21,5,0,4,11,92,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406434793193882,0.0,0.14014774893085385,0.1449543086862251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14291279563320722,0.0,0.1426965380579721,0.0,0.1480570366801159,0.0,0.14674333036609946,0.0,0.0,0.1117450974948137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396127175797343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578525172441338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438165598154633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312229348453282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13858045266515973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14982796449305796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19771298956022695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278072144850974,0.11898731112487723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11171316329714943,0.0,0.0,0.10377710494088854,0.10794425993627714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15156090636170366,0.0,0.0,0.12220595230053083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819166876086153,0.15026254508289852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012240268736292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4743439344276342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491766366744538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523101965326133,0.11249296201991094,0.12232948605621514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298189535515404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152234145356275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087880012720235,0.0,0.0,0.08255087156373107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625814094692045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189111184613853,0.0,0.0,0.3976886722218412,0.0,0.0,0.09012838183206333
mentalhealth,pineapple111111,2020/01/23,"I feel awful I'm about to get real, like scary real, with some random internet strangers because I'm too embarrassed to tell anyone in my life about this. 

I feel broken. I feel like the worst person in the world. I feel like my family would be better off if I just left. (Not end my life, not that bad, but just....disappeared.) 

I am 25f. I have a husband, 25m, and 2 toddlers. 1m and 3f. I have no patience. I'm a stay at home mom with no life so I think its contributing. Usually I can hold my anger in but today I almost hurt my 3yo. 

She wouldn't stop whining. Not crying. Not saying words. Just ""wwweeeehhhhh wwweeehhhhh wwweeehhhh"" over and over. I tried to ignore her because that seems to work best and she usually quits, but after 20 minutes of that same high pitched noise being repeated over and over....I lost it. I yelled at her. Told her to shut it. Told her I was done with her. I felt the urge to slap her, and had to physically leave in order to not hit her. After I had calmed down in the other room, I started to sob. Because I hated myself. I was hyperventilating, crying, scratching my neck and scalp until I bled. I couldn't stop. 

Then she came over and hugged me and told me ""its ok mommy, stop crying."" And she stroked my hair. That made it worse because she doesnt deserve my shit. 

I need help. I need advice. What do I do?",0.4056617647058829,2.7663982426470604,2.323382352941177,92.6539705882353,88.63235294117645,5.111764705882353,17.926470588235293,6.661559191721324,0.005982352941176661,1030,27,222,13,34,341,150,272,0.152,0.68,0.16699999999999998,0.3522,0,0,0,0,0,1,56.0,0,0,0,5,6,19,3,1,6,2,17,9,4,1,0,50,39,17,0,6,11,2,8,3,0,2,4,2,2,1,12,14,0,5,7,0,0,1,10,11,0,0,12,10,47,8,31,21,4,34,0,4,0,1,21,18,2,5,16,143,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436265378170208,0.0,0.0,0.10694367614394623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467627747389198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891726245619459,0.2604144845157175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207886167808656,0.09445495242463336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12214949560295225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.351940746283935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929235945597872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459213010846933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006805026395887,0.0,0.2160029409739644,0.15259431793783526,0.10254369696703576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05579801982528231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544180790023314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158505470102,0.11283890664766022,0.1071280094215158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433043651637803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130846196985338,0.11603732261597124,0.0,0.2263056747569929,0.1565296508754945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658362064516067,0.0,0.0,0.10105570606471398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250815865921071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15838006941417798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325268429490492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135937814519402,0.0,0.2431210699650981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493077573605623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722571189501476,0.0,0.0,0.10962754109370088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559281454838107,0.11383342253058285,0.0,0.26786599979530923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334695019686576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06843242588127703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10123287413579624,0.3061527910707336,0.0,0.07250944593333365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352478105276249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775087470435374,0.0,0.10883720813447928,0.07586687779978576,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sarahbq37,2020/01/23,"i self harm and have no one to tell i self harm. i don’t do it too often. i cut myself about once every few months, and not too deeply. it’s really more like scratches and i don’t make myself bleed very much at all. sometimes i bang my head. usually it’s not too hard, but i did give myself an egg shaped lump a few months ago. besides that it’s pinching myself every now and then. i think i do it for two reasons: because i have a lot of repressed emotions, especially anger, and because i feel the need to punish myself. i don’t have anyone to tell. i don’t want people to worry about me. my mom isn’t good with these things, and she would cry and cry about it, and i can’t deal with it. i would have to emotionally support her. i have a therapist. i’ve tried telling her multiple times but i can’t get the words out. i also don’t want to be sent to a mental hospital. i function pretty well and my anxiety and depression really isn’t too bad anymore. i don’t understand myself. my mental health is in one of the best places it’s been in for a while, yet i self harm. i feel pathetic. do i tell anyone? and if so, how?",0.7059803921568601,2.6597672100840377,2.8539705882352955,92.26370098039213,82.78151260504202,5.9834733893557415,19.58053221288516,7.1686216300943375,0.31915910364145583,868,23,196,12,24,294,121,238,0.21899999999999997,0.677,0.10400000000000001,-0.9861,0,0,0,0,0,1,30.0,0,0,0,1,14,14,3,1,9,0,24,5,1,3,1,36,36,19,0,6,5,1,4,1,0,2,3,0,0,3,11,14,1,1,5,0,0,1,13,9,1,3,3,4,37,5,20,30,7,16,0,1,0,0,14,6,0,3,10,141,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677928910551524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730922782814254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352050830035271,0.0,0.1082747685816518,0.15267892889530404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911586735805151,0.13310721259031413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457507746551675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23985277071883776,0.0,0.11255723498973992,0.09403444287435646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24562004295587556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18397354831870708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040687478587326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05704075102284984,0.1047330309801156,0.0,0.09157292863370847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780161834276796,0.0,0.11204763904740464,0.11605060440876368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053338624269226136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928188280936256,0.0,0.0,0.07287684615759593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22005053408092626,0.0,0.0,0.12786739853285314,0.17428891874009794,0.0,0.0802580434895915,0.08095375189589081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11627050166237912,0.14796303385197326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07568994956240396,0.0,0.11406727706627838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107279362849797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13988383718038722,0.1122526798730366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34168791000108284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079793645430508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238933623104354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817038784956448,0.0,0.0,0.12676352215208148,0.0725326967993406,0.06995655004973644,0.0,0.0,0.06366229319664145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412437332433867,0.0,0.1066505784580452,0.1136576545676786,0.0,0.0,0.12024362003341857,0.09008289266763772,0.12879146665666494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816370726498384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087507691423514,0.0,0.15511316354985574,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fang_Jolima,2020/01/23,"I'm struggling. Any advice? Hi y'all, new here. Just found this subreddit. I've been struggling with anxiety and not feeling ""normal"" for a few months. Seen a doc, meds are shitty, can't seem to get my head straight. Anything, anything at all will help. Not suicidal, no thoughts of self harm, just....not me. God this sucks.",1.1849544626593804,3.835218606557377,1.561530054644809,95.93916211293262,92.44262295081968,4.67832422586521,23.171220400728608,6.42735559955562,0.6557854280510022,249,10,50,3,9,75,52,61,0.256,0.5770000000000001,0.16699999999999998,-0.7556,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,0,2,4,1,2,2,0,4,1,1,0,1,11,12,1,1,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,2,3,0,5,7,2,4,0,0,1,0,4,2,1,1,2,24,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21947506434526304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15273468845710073,0.0,0.1718172452236247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696508730207547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135637549716535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462606732487737,0.0,0.0,0.11734345139505485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305028676993194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15054364676782656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494783122488019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792723877064895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216918640301212,0.0,0.0,0.2200588527991888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20446604796776136,0.2343052288087186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.469598255959964,0.0,0.2456743158790448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783061288632204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hivefleetechidna,2020/01/23,"Physical health with mental health problems So, I'll be honest, I wouldn't normally dream of putting something like this up in such a public way normally but I dont know where else to turn to now.

I've had depression and anxiety since my early teens and have been suffering for about 17 years, a nasty combination of bullying, broken home and realising I'm gay and the homophobia that came with that. I coped well enough with it up until 4 years ago where it progressed to suicidal and self harming and it took 2 years and me clawing my arm open to finally open up to my husband and get some help. 

Now, one of my destructive behaviours is overeating and that coupled with asthma has very much taken its toll on my weight which in turn has made my asthma worse. I do get some exercise from walking which has controlled the weight gain over the past 9 years but it's now at a point where I need to start losing it. I'm just over 16 stone and I'd like to drop down to 11/11.5 stone. Problem is, I dont have the funds or willpower to try diets and I'm far to anxious to step into a gym or go jogging. 

So what do I do? My get up and go doesnt exist and my anxiety holds me back from getting out and doing something about it. I want to sort it for so many reasons but I feel like I just cant and its starting to affect so much of my life in so many ways its unreal. 

I don't know if anyone can help but I could use some.",3.07674884437596,4.216530593220341,4.279545454545456,88.26341679506935,73.57627118644069,7.668721109399077,25.612480739599384,8.150884317080207,1.3601864406779651,1115,36,244,17,22,366,160,295,0.195,0.7240000000000001,0.08,-0.9915,1,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,4,18,12,1,0,8,0,22,11,1,5,0,54,45,28,1,9,9,1,3,3,0,1,6,0,1,1,17,24,3,2,4,4,1,8,6,7,1,1,6,3,23,5,43,36,6,48,0,3,0,1,5,22,0,7,18,158,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291635878330376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16037360031728567,0.11841644971780252,0.0,0.07329238655813881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059989581415662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988583727601093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175642308331786,0.08369001847976028,0.1159810283036056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09028107266396383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456958662362969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756342726630861,0.0,0.0,0.1083067925430322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05300000074686887,0.07488323009127944,0.0,0.1148248815208995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21905591315223574,0.0,0.11914292677112975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228369250472091,0.0,0.0,0.14051689983521154,0.0,0.10514272729342654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11521235549344055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740372692893843,0.15362886404974066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11726645668079322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991829550607975,0.0,0.2125414912960349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563362556232997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410911225013132,0.07772249543817415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20540214376714347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102855614627875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000622849143855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908851768816818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20059663481432627,0.0,0.10537277166040723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777213155697812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934983001360823,0.0,0.0,0.0867079569266313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16139068551005215,0.0,0.0,0.14838387697712038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465576255668865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645856757174088,0.07116571045363575,0.2280275148305003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09053058472588772,0.0,0.08648724797118884,0.061825387614965525,0.16640203217988073,0.0,0.2552843647464229,0.09424551810654552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682025136148136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27000185637410523
mentalhealth,Fatherhoodrocks,2020/01/23,"After having a miscarriage I wrote this on my blog. 
https://punkrockerdad.com/2020/01/23/caught-somewhere-in-time/",25.42272727272727,33.8764771818182,12.30045454545455,16.670681818181833,49.90909090909091,9.472727272727274,23.681818181818183,8.841846274778883,3.8400545454545454,103,2,7,2,2,24,11,11,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,knowsnothing000,2020/01/23,"If you relate to the title or know someone who would - this video might help <3 take care [https://youtu.be/AdXV4zQa3nI](https://youtu.be/AdXV4zQa3nI)

Something to help those who feel like certain things hurt them more than they do others",11.586761904761907,15.59828348571429,4.131428571428572,86.22190476190477,57.0,5.80952380952381,23.095238095238088,6.42735559955562,0.4948095238095234,202,4,28,1,3,45,32,35,0.075,0.636,0.289,0.8316,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,7,7,2,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,3,3,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,7,0,0,3,1,19,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33547371694263234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16637028263409398,0.2350630939486556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4410912454908209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3522394084291999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18082935732331876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607501708964293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3490547679484458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787907908581888,0.2533076753249276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473938175458807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21859662797489798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337374453366911,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GravioraManent,2020/01/23,Frustrating My social anxiety was pretty bad a few years ago but now i am much better and have less obsessive thoughts. But i still struggle with speaking/contributing to a group even if I’m close with them. I’ve gotten so used to not being heard or listened to that the second i realize people are actually listening and looking at me i get nervous and jumble my words. I’ve never been good at speaking verbally (I’m better at writing my thoughts) so whenever i get nervous it gets much worse and to avoid further embarrassing myself i just quickly end my thought. It’s so frustrating cause i feel the few times a contribute i feel like i mess up and the people around me confirm that I’m not worth listening to. It’s frustrating being better mentally but still struggling with similar issues,4.560830769230769,6.87912536,5.5086666666666675,76.11946153846156,72.06666666666666,8.882051282051282,32.205128205128204,9.466822959209583,3.466097435897437,644,31,107,16,13,211,90,150,0.27699999999999997,0.626,0.09699999999999999,-0.9825,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,3,10,17,3,7,6,0,7,0,0,2,1,30,25,13,0,1,8,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,5,10,0,1,6,0,1,0,3,12,0,1,7,8,17,5,13,16,5,16,0,0,1,0,9,7,0,2,10,76,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.14923719472715832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13556283180546974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169906983578248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13613973547413796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768979859659713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4057613166866311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710078926573226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13545020236544653,0.0,0.0,0.10100853512719928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465156579572306,0.109252911530779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396981567576199,0.0,0.0,0.12827006312033626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15961873312887292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471366050912835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842231799688436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15411703173285868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22484165261336972,0.0,0.11794870805378492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212044208977516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558434640294996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15589243226941896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24425949572660066,0.0,0.0,0.31975037104609993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3642269757620384,0.08917445896464006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320820422921224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15584829149952206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848162563109536
mentalhealth,Mrdaxxel,2020/01/23,"Why Am I Like this (throwaway for reasons) (17 male U.S)

My life has been pretty good lately, stressful and all but i can handle all that.

Recently I got a girlfriend, a job i enjoy going to, and with that money i can use and save.

But even with all this, i feel nothing. Nothing that lasts in the very least, ill feel some emotion for maybe half an hour at most, then it leaves and all thats left is this numbness. I dont care for anything or anyone or anything

i dont know if maybe some professional help would be a good idea, but i needed someplace to rant so thanks anonymous reddit hivemind",4.412121848739496,5.1860235210084085,4.6885609243697495,87.94191701680674,70.09243697478989,6.622268907563026,27.480042016806717,5.985473137389443,0.9616798319327732,465,15,95,2,8,146,82,119,0.11900000000000001,0.68,0.201,0.9009,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,2,9,0,1,5,0,10,3,0,2,4,28,19,12,0,3,6,0,2,1,1,1,3,0,0,1,8,6,0,0,5,0,1,1,2,2,0,1,2,2,10,7,9,15,8,9,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,6,6,64,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863091508850677,0.0,0.255695121739592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15839927751295274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641601540910453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17475843080266568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261342822132977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710877626441727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829433566884957,0.2606162122511521,0.12425511633849065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413414087963016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299772877047255,0.0,0.0,0.17538186885430626,0.0,0.0,0.15417024680117475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538147135396419,0.12663865857659662,0.1752521868322944,0.1645031881052502,0.16879845871535626,0.0,0.1097349491707458,0.07590076254597414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31215882770783104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519703749466165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981430970630958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805637753163085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15973535345020656,0.15339867937887114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17796368470618176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14303407591798256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341806526448647,0.0,0.12818778773350706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018770721232446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036287076816337,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pilsbury_poboy,2020/01/23,"I have a mental illness, where do I find help in Boston? Please don’t read this if you’re depressed.









I need someone to help me understand what mental illness(es) I have. Symptoms include existential depression, bad memory, reclusive social awkwardness, no trust in myself, apathy towards nearly everything, hard objective world view, no faith in humanity, writing things like this on the internet like a loon, i feel like humanity is a sham of an existence and a horrible plight in a world otherwise full of amazing, natural beautiful occurrences shaped by happenchance and sculpted by the indifferent passing of time, feeling that self awareness is a curse and we’re the freaks among the rest of the natural world for being the only creatures on this rock who value more than what nature can provide itself by sacrificing so much more beauty to achieve it, etc..

Relative to a typical human lifestyle, I feel like I’m well off considering I feel like I’ve never deserved many of the things I own through faking it til making it to make the money I do while others don’t have the opportunities I’ve had, I wish everyone could love each other and not war over land or resources. I feel like the end is inevitable; globally tribe mentality divides people further and further every day, all while natural disasters occur, wars continue, people 

i’m resistant to post this because i always start writing or typing things down but then either losing track or being scared to say what i think. i’m sorry for the nonsense but i need help getting my mind away from all that mess or at least a direction to go in to managing these thoughts so i don’t lose my mind any further. i need to start looking for a therapist. i’m not suicidal, just crazy and want to be less crazy. i feel lost in here, always thinking always always",8.498738738738737,8.414724894894897,8.492267267267266,67.12777027027028,61.312312312312315,11.724324324324325,38.62012012012011,11.20814326018867,4.612013813813813,1462,67,235,36,18,476,199,333,0.145,0.685,0.17,0.6023,1,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,5,6,25,2,2,21,0,17,3,0,2,3,44,45,19,3,7,11,0,7,6,0,0,2,1,0,4,20,7,0,0,11,3,1,2,8,13,1,0,3,10,21,12,41,38,13,41,1,5,2,1,13,27,0,5,17,160,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3156634825715672,0.0,0.0,0.06449559079762407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910687502124423,0.0,0.07918883651834857,0.057814604377265086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572335960775099,0.0,0.0,0.06116503388085556,0.0,0.163373990238995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400157294774231,0.0,0.10577353713189508,0.0,0.0,0.07990820110300839,0.09062528416403123,0.08523758145292508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877288012598645,0.2710196443397012,0.0,0.0,0.08668357212726098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04955086038678138,0.0,0.053900709143660144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495951138796301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907111253612881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780091086102989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796431199432847,0.2122071480080738,0.10353089102556899,0.0,0.08559831394056258,0.0,0.12661510813339094,0.0961545717717198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28673430214600704,0.0,0.19152610948325266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06971954324857849,0.21097169932278076,0.07314774603983526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07213136705036796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150255058692328,0.0,0.0,0.10410767798378548,0.0,0.0,0.09083210733893178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486733982464186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542190608584146,0.0949530612588148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989405505170181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667914327620948,0.08035904287900925,0.0,0.0,0.10616748959971087,0.1342588504631306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037413982801395,0.0,0.0,0.09857681384765736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011849380766864,0.1890257825221026,0.12154143073140022,0.0,0.0752936954927612,0.05530294299290449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873352773907244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594007677736195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527405524144648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906324488937924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nanowhit,2020/01/23,"I hear people being tortured in my head I’ve had a history of severe mental health issues over the last few years. Never had a direct diagnosis, actually rarely even sought medical treatment. I often have dark thoughts, psychotic delusions and panic attacks. There are periods when people in my classes think I seem ‘off’ and high-energy, and the opposite is true as well.

The latest development for my affliction is hearing the sounds of people, specifically one person, struggling to escape some kind of captivity. It’s usually muffled screams, followed by someone muttering. I used to hear crowds and ambient sounds, nothing too disturbing, but now that I’m hearing this person I break down crying and panicking several times per day.

I’m worried that I’m going to start making out words or commands in the voices and it will drive me to hurt myself or worse someone else... the thought of anyone suffering makes me sick and it’s hard enough as it is to hear it so often.

I have an aversion for medical care. I can’t even call someone, because dialling the phone is such a daunting task. I’m just wondering what’s wrong with me... I used to be able to manage by myself however  I’ve become confused and scared by everything happening and I don’t know if I can do it.

What steps can I take to make things better?",5.980821128451384,7.369561881632656,6.646914765906367,73.07644657863149,66.91836734693877,9.683073229291717,33.59543817527011,9.916854025145753,3.5959123649459785,1051,47,174,24,17,345,157,245,0.21100000000000002,0.733,0.055999999999999994,-0.9915,2,0,0,0,0,2,28.0,0,0,0,1,12,16,2,5,11,0,17,5,1,5,2,34,43,17,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,4,9,0,2,12,11,0,0,6,0,0,4,3,11,1,1,4,10,19,5,27,36,3,23,0,2,0,0,10,7,0,9,11,116,31,2,0.09790531163612724,0.0,0.09554146114586727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684576703078614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138142605579313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05968216924913473,0.10812872467242388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658929195139595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999722696505554,0.0,0.09982099026000406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754438755302463,0.06314082650095558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817873249367905,0.0,0.0,0.10116235865960484,0.0,0.12933106993735358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799098112761364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05564184483160315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657734374257026,0.0,0.08770392866294764,0.0,0.1004790954217574,0.10406876801043033,0.5517320087761385,0.0,0.0,0.10344233711817986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480966103229312,0.0,0.0,0.10218770874959048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195331599375808,0.053806198830117384,0.07980589623131787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19605766729295745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19725860262442754,0.09866552655416357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755106120047913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394278703572084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06634317297402043,0.0,0.0,0.11487078832716704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20362564698033112,0.17097428347350566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980202966674719,0.0,0.0,0.08912931864718393,0.0,0.22121026901964286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24886455850363695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929788349192435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235188924426424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361260988399744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504393867518224,0.0627337704532136,0.0,0.15545176261930374,0.057089374548685776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16911750900693046,0.10782886880895202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802863311612309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617413410839828,0.0,0.09942759640340833,0.09977387684198873,0.0,0.10704408884079912,0.0,0.06304781074193477
mentalhealth,throwaway67282862526,2020/01/23,"Homicidal thoughts (disturbing flair?) I am a teenager and I have a compulsion.  I want to kill people. Let me explain. 
Ever since I was a child, maybe 7-10, I knew I was different. Withdrawn. Never liked any of the other things the kids liked. 
I grew up rough, my mom was a drug addict and I  would grow up having a lot of abusive father figures. My mom is sober now and a great mother.
However,  I believe the damage was done. When I was ten I killed my first animal, a bird. I ran it over with my bike. I know its disturbing, but I need you to visualize my situation.
I have no empathy or sympathy for others, it's been apparent for a long time. I've hidden it for years now. The compulsion is growing every day, and in my most lucid moments I know its wrong, disgusting and heinous. 
I cannot deny merging these thoughts into my sexual life. I've never been interested in sex. All if my sexual fantasies involve or cultiminate in murder. At my present state however, I dont believe I could go through with it. I worry for my future however. After a few minutes of research, I do have a few arbitrary signs of early schitzophrenia. I dont hear voices, more like a presence that just symbolizes these thoughts. I do go to therapy but I do not discuss these feelings; we've all been to therapy and know it would be no better than telling a police officer. 

I'm simply worried about my future and how to move forward. I do not want to end up in a facility, but I dont see how this might magically disappear. Hope I cant get in trouble for a reddit post. Help me, reddit.

(Just for clarification, at my present state I do not feel I will harm others, i simply worry about my mental health later due to my past)",2.1967742513896376,4.412396852071009,4.428805809575042,81.55314057737138,79.0,7.647265554957862,26.51461359153667,8.575989854853784,2.1984800788954644,1328,55,255,30,33,459,183,338,0.154,0.745,0.10099999999999999,-0.9572,5,0,1,0,0,0,50.0,0,1,0,2,10,17,4,2,18,0,33,5,0,2,5,51,54,16,3,8,11,4,3,3,0,4,4,2,0,2,16,10,0,0,12,2,0,9,12,10,0,2,14,6,47,7,36,33,7,46,0,1,1,1,13,13,0,7,26,187,63,1,0.0,0.12244101404968888,0.0,0.11265586490293775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027475075725692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328576077409897,0.0,0.09139584136882917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250858945744974,0.0,0.0,0.06664575760727266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796831607612704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575270953245054,0.3633411676851115,0.0,0.11984160379112604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152857628118033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347695574110453,0.08706841578667336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450362856415177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790096006160568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053990890236437286,0.0,0.11746101877245395,0.0,0.0,0.1139327262968842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984559866674637,0.1164717022527783,0.0,0.06926663066241842,0.0,0.0,0.10263994760194003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286608208397851,0.0,0.17037890143613105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567216214189057,0.07299210547821541,0.15146012753910335,0.0,0.0,0.09145265729042104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785598137496801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381893029609364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041424246612165,0.10962742035624604,0.0,0.2420611424362393,0.0,0.10983407674274474,0.0,0.0766253083008662,0.15940437347211386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864973310015507,0.07164295149599621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897116415336388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234860881876575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854839244955338,0.11615850147507313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032372399175297,0.0,0.23635661614505854,0.0,0.06865451105083173,0.0,0.0,0.2461212752178485,0.06025839110713783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190523117173292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148403904377939,0.0,0.14681955684791045,0.11298607879431688,0.0,0.06654757856729346
mentalhealth,Lyssaloupoo,2020/01/23,"Boyfriend’s Mental Health (Help) Hello, I previously posted in a different thread about my boyfriend’s mental health a couple of months ago. Here is the link for that post. ( https://www.reddit.com/r/RelationshipAdviceNow/comments/cxo8k0/tips_on_convincing_someone_to_get_help/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app&utm_name=iossmf ). To summarize, my boyfriend because obsessed with “coincidences” around him that started when he took an LSD tab. Some thing I will give him are weird, but for the most part the coincidences are not anything I would give a second thought. But he is obsessed with them. He basically said to me one day that he thought it might be the devil or Illuminati and I freaked out. Our friends and his family also freaked out, but he refused to seek help. He stopped talking
About them so I dropped it because it was clear he was embarassed. I believed that it was getting better, but I think after he saw the reaction of me and his friends he just stopped speaking about these. Recently, after he has been under more stress he has started obsessing over them more, and all of my friends and myself will tell him he’s just looking for things or reaching for them. He basically will say things like, his total of $6.67 at Jack in the Box is almost the devils number and that he’s receiving signs like that. Something fell off the table the other day and he would not stop talking about it. He also is convinced that one of his coworkers did voodoo on him because he touched him and then he had a “vision” of him doing voodoo. He also said he thought about him the next day and instantly a bird pooped on him so he thinks he’s cursed. I’ve told his family multiple times and they won’t do anything s they’re very religious and say they will pray on it. I need advice. He is a completely changed person from who I originally fell in love with. I don’t think I can continue to be in this relationship, but I care about him deeply and need advice on getting him help.",6.107939801285795,8.533684251412431,5.1706896551724135,79.73313559322035,68.0677966101695,7.481628677186832,28.59107734268459,8.216663640201805,1.9248349113578809,1611,58,284,23,29,480,172,354,0.092,0.76,0.14800000000000002,0.9755,1,0,1,0,0,0,53.0,1,0,6,1,16,18,0,4,17,0,29,4,1,1,3,53,51,26,0,4,11,0,1,2,3,8,2,5,0,1,20,18,0,4,7,0,0,4,4,9,0,3,14,8,40,9,41,27,7,41,3,0,2,1,69,15,0,6,21,188,60,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18149242057642606,0.08231886290442116,0.0,0.09299048052814683,0.0,0.0,0.22279135615595735,0.0,0.20123750604092952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15283930298155965,0.08266918056434065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16982819081568268,0.0,0.0,0.10462660117920612,0.0,0.08213119027634162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468164665463656,0.0,0.0982384311663133,0.0,0.0973667640696586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275291125758024,0.0,0.17966994943669312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702373957781514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750889563150796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21524087391849994,0.0,0.09703583911007686,0.17816836842884615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19742145003534267,0.0,0.0,0.186735547401276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073790351862868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798287368490152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381392527591801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18717134538261584,0.09851466309553683,0.0,0.0,0.07412363605958902,0.0,0.0,0.1377158453117133,0.0,0.0,0.09876255338688374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585490977623529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005633099309348,0.0,0.0,0.08108578492711235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787722927453156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169258715242873,0.09970182453330063,0.0,0.0,0.1766709967535573,0.1476993111157646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149170441308672,0.0,0.0,0.1314600807226311,0.0,0.0,0.2329168861241573,0.1063760831316291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14928209227858855,0.08116775173278827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850853373412288,0.17851165386837972,0.0,0.22117235295639054,0.0541500938297008,0.0,0.0,0.08873610291327927,0.10317598519267478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766230188305688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193669185780335,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TdotRaps11,2020/01/23,"My therapist suggested I name my anxiety Thought it was an interesting idea. The thought is to give “it” a name to make it an “other” and not you - if that makes sense. 

Taking name suggestions",2.564166666666665,5.247770416666668,3.9811111111111153,82.55000000000003,80.94444444444446,9.155555555555557,28.44444444444445,9.516144504307137,3.2050777777777766,149,7,29,5,4,49,28,36,0.047,0.879,0.07400000000000001,0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,2,0,11,8,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,4,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,1,0,20,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550480581227919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198251150092664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37636502381786985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4450906363684043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506733133449693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38710001679380784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.529360505795185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gavin_Wuin,2020/01/23,"I need help I have been having panic attacks recently and it has gotten to the point where I scratch my neck till it bleeds. I have a therapist but for some reason I don't fell comfortable talking with them,I am 14 so I don't have control over where I go for therapy. I have tried to be open but people don't take me seriously.",3.1495652173913062,4.125935260869569,4.841275362318843,84.93234782608697,73.20289855072464,8.418550724637681,26.84347826086957,8.841846274778883,1.87236,259,9,56,5,5,88,49,69,0.12300000000000001,0.8190000000000001,0.057999999999999996,-0.6157,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,1,2,0,12,2,1,2,0,9,16,5,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,2,1,10,1,7,13,1,9,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,2,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157036417094584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31124707333299245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15771330702814312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18600671955058612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20576751164727128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32559401944411337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923880266623429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623332871977839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853228426388094,0.2740041344138788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20865030947327265,0.22304916759677226,0.0,0.0,0.31735280316639314,0.32220636981003925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840865919318495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bojack_Hollyhock,2020/01/23,"Why there's so much stigma about mental health problems in the world in general? The common person simply doesn't know enough or it's a choice to create a taboo about mental problems? Even most of the more ""educated"" people still avoids talking about this kind, hiding the topic from the daily life conversations. Can ever expect to see people talking about mental disorders with the same openness as a broken leg or a heart attack?",9.515,9.141229089743591,8.656025641025643,67.73480769230771,59.384615384615394,9.851282051282054,31.038461538461537,8.841846274778883,2.6942461538461537,351,9,52,4,4,110,58,78,0.185,0.716,0.098,-0.7608,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,9,5,1,1,10,0,2,4,2,0,1,14,4,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,12,4,5,7,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,3,3,38,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20753707463348692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20907717304457105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188495880531474,0.0,0.12049132815273927,0.16501568640859693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939113947309024,0.0,0.2161769005556824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18996967178287927,0.10025712093824918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885360132240548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5515305955402257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410485219553805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25294385602784586,0.15928823990758353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3491160473241208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453707183902896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456864561838959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29325586167973305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16461201351022775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wheezeybee,2020/01/23,"I’m lost I’m a junior in high school , and now is the time that I should be figuring stuff out . Everyone keeps asking me , “what are you going to do when you leave high school?” “Have you thought of a college?”  and a bunch more questions I don’t even know the answer to. 
 I didn’t expect to live this long , I thought I’d be dead by 16. I’ve always thought like this, even before middle school, it’s normal for me . There’s a lot of pressure , at home and at school. I just didn’t think I’d live , I’m almost 17 . I’m scared ... I don’t know what I’m going to do , I thought I would’ve k*lled myself by the time I turned 17 or at least 16 . Now I’m here , alive , and lost . I know I have time , but I’m so underprepared . I’m completely behind everyone - emotionally , I mean . 
 I just thought I’d be dead, and now I’m not and I don’t know what to do with that information.",-0.3452127659574451,1.5059883085106414,1.9472765957446825,97.84400000000002,86.12765957446808,5.2493617021276595,17.378723404255318,6.508806274219699,-0.4179476595744682,654,15,165,7,20,221,88,188,0.10400000000000001,0.8740000000000001,0.022000000000000002,-0.9048,0,0,0,0,0,2,31.0,0,3,0,2,11,5,0,2,7,0,16,0,0,0,0,34,43,10,2,3,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,9,8,0,1,15,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,9,0,20,1,17,30,4,18,0,2,0,0,6,8,0,4,9,93,29,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11396023452342373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469567953080776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639321442488583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684049385113153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932338885813785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280163925513909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15033553285974405,0.0,0.0,0.21749295285405254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935710492629707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24048450041357575,0.11415666187939028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011559705946922,0.0,0.0,0.2501791279141583,0.0,0.0,0.12050408445367995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05559984584667674,0.0,0.2009855039049623,0.10071469759531808,0.0,0.0,0.2484653086439549,0.0967537615448447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396805904400998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150568222322338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748872631001676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393962438965745,0.4607108488080478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302806018732282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292226696920588,0.0,0.451746119062488,0.19908351985868847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378820951190275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084449215104833,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Myopic_potato_peeler,2020/01/23,I tried being open and honest I tried to be open and honest to my parents but it didn’t work. I wanted to share my struggles with them in an attempt to be more open but instead they did the usual thing of saying that their problems are worse. It just made me feel worse and now I don’t know what else to d.,2.3686363636363623,3.4281004090909093,3.3246666666666687,94.737,75.21212121212122,5.28,20.775757575757574,3.1291,-0.4103842424242421,241,5,55,0,5,77,46,66,0.201,0.705,0.094,-0.875,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,3,2,3,5,0,1,2,0,7,0,0,1,0,15,11,5,0,2,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,2,10,3,8,5,1,6,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,2,41,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21896503724323704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325341812185439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14405259421137884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24802135008639636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910497998660893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25081047524214073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20844588081401613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740214973115548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17413882243324785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3559203408639877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886847355980394,0.0,0.15460333982264415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908242262166083,0.0,0.5342390321603671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,V-A-L-O-R,2020/01/23,"Just a vent. I’m 13. Might be too young, feel free to remove.

So I just had to go to the highschool in my town and try to get used to all my classes, take a tour, sign up for what I want to do, etc. It’s just so big, and I know that I can’t handle all the honors classes my parents want me to do and it’s stressing me out so badly, most of my friends have been leaving me out more recently and it hurts me more than anything because I’ve been through a lot of people and I finally thought that I’d found some who cared, but I’m so worried I’m wrong. I don’t feel comfortable coming to my parents for anything, they judge me so heavily and expect me to brush it off, but I can’t do that... it’s just not the person I am. I guess it just really hurts me because I don’t see an end to it, I have to suck up four years of this and then get to college and get a good job just so I can tire myself out and die alone. I don’t see the point. It’s probably hurting me more than it should just because I’m ADHD and the drug to counteract it fucks with my emotions. So yeah, I’m worried that I’ll lose the only people I thought cared and have to start over. I’ve hurt myself a lot in the past, and I’ve been more recently only because I know no other way to deal with the loneliness. I’m not suicidal, but I think I’m slipping more towards that edge every day and I guess I just don’t know any other way to stop it. I guess it’s all wrong and that it’ll probably be fine but they just so readily left without me and it scared me a bit. 

I don’t know what I expect out of this but I just needed to get off my chest.",1.4735520478695958,2.266825050139275,3.4991767254719903,93.65736510884146,77.05013927576601,6.655565872278965,23.32415144949964,6.937597516519254,0.4991992365624678,1239,36,307,12,27,423,146,359,0.18,0.732,0.08800000000000001,-0.9905,3,1,1,0,0,2,30.0,0,0,2,2,19,20,2,2,15,1,24,4,1,1,3,70,62,29,2,6,18,2,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,27,22,0,1,10,0,1,3,11,12,0,1,7,5,43,9,41,50,14,32,0,5,2,1,8,16,2,8,11,206,70,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625624873259072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157006925152623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06012443990816067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455141063660725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382185950640216,0.21558501371681435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652500926866896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18028759531676167,0.0,0.0,0.07616069049673507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05701960953562714,0.0911507820536974,0.0,0.0,0.0917596023955351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253197952314462,0.0,0.0,0.09945366464239996,0.07830841554324612,0.0,0.0986047976072576,0.0,0.0,0.07449246957768832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940938342838946,0.0,0.0,0.0968530350410232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09694120700450963,0.06830830990612821,0.08173716614105768,0.18477031938948896,0.0,0.05024762015257988,0.07415733036326635,0.0,0.0,0.292193422654394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3785953576348796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773708915087255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19435972684603228,0.0,0.0,0.09361748573320124,0.09606189085199182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891246642370168,0.0,0.15033256228820624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379310743147867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555773865770656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448541179571902,0.0,0.0,0.19634620226817512,0.0,0.08440101011847237,0.12259004224556375,0.07719955078625224,0.0,0.0,0.08357965232534055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19065013674930745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056640166919641514,0.0,0.17459599225584918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851767314862431,0.0,0.14090875966381794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257976775605098,0.0,0.0,0.07391792529965116,0.10127774972573417,0.0,0.0,0.0967103857759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647620097941638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056652015726873124,0.0,0.14038141876466498,0.0,0.10161869758588032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060027190596584734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636116648763809,0.0,0.0,0.10429754167884278,0.1403575744224222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522778226564723,0.0,0.0,0.1795770831065212,0.0,0.0,0.1933332991359236,0.0,0.056935611232881676
mentalhealth,i_like_films,2020/01/23,What does social anxiety feel like? How do you know when it's a condition and not just general anxiety?,3.1165000000000016,5.641849650000001,5.420000000000004,74.01500000000001,77.5,12.0,30.0,11.20814326018867,4.808499999999999,83,4,15,4,2,29,19,20,0.177,0.706,0.11800000000000001,0.1179,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,7,3,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6552237823020399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37476653524829867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21653726600057727,0.3059435789576996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23535630298561916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092224762976098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4365493604945279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Random43863529,2020/01/23,"I just want to feel enjoyment I just want to feel enjoyment in something. Everything feels like a task that needs to be done. I don’t look forward to anything, except sleep. That is all; sorry",1.6191891891891892,4.355978486486489,2.6041081081081106,89.57264864864867,88.45945945945945,6.203243243243244,23.616216216216216,7.554174236665415,1.4714691891891905,152,6,29,3,5,48,27,37,0.033,0.657,0.311,0.875,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,4,1,1,0,1,10,11,0,0,3,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,3,3,6,9,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472662569230187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307491409245481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700485753729738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4557892865420661,0.21466021092012924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14679746195126472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523242765964806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22279924682282345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3006931353246283,0.0,0.0,0.2313212086998805,0.0,0.33635843284878963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35445721904543703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MeanMiniQueen,2020/01/23,"I constantly shift between thinking i'm pathetic and thinking i'm the best I have a few days where i think i am a pathetic loser that isn't worth shit and i hate myself

But then a few days later i feel like i'm the greatest person alive and fucking love myself

I can't wrap my head around and i don't remember how long i've been like this.",3.2824324324324285,3.8124807567567593,4.852270270270271,86.63462162162165,72.51351351351352,8.082162162162161,26.962162162162162,8.238735603445708,1.5715870270270274,272,9,60,4,5,92,47,74,0.193,0.526,0.28,0.8048,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,2,3,8,3,0,5,0,6,4,2,1,0,12,16,7,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,5,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,1,1,11,4,2,15,4,8,0,1,0,2,2,2,2,0,8,38,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114706656099802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492950148786507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567081324825634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.306401358104813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201128731539953,0.16970641114277085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21961198013475092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345323344273389,0.2437957578675632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321107421429491,0.0,0.0,0.210225072098372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21439896276326284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074202839920325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26909886305788033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438425861832918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4566390764367648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CoffeeZambie,2020/01/23,"Mental help? I've (F, 20) been thinking about getting help for my mental health for a while. I feel like it's a thing that gets over looked sometimes, you can look after yourself well physically, but does it even help if your mind feels all over the place like it's just not working as it should? I don't feel healthy in that regard. 

I keep putting it off, I don't know where to start, how to bring it up, what exactly I should be looking for because I've always ignored how bad I was feeling and would just think I was tired or hungry, hormonal or that I was being dramatic or that I didn't deserve the help or something, just made excuses instead facing the reality that it could be something entirely different from just feeling bad. But I feel like just talking to someone experienced in this area would help, that I might be reassured or that I might find my reasons for why I feel like this and if I do get those reasons it might be a lot easier to handle everything. I always hear that it gets better when you start making the steps, I'm kind of afraid, but to be honest what really do I have to loose with this? I just worry I'll be wasting someone else's time. Again no idea where I should start.

I realise that I don't really have many good days lately, I just feel like crying anytime and anywhere but I hold that in, until I'm alone anyway. I keep isolating myself, but I just can't even think of where to start with people because I end up pushing them away and I keep doubting my own character. I'm just not really finding much joy in anything, it's like everything's a chore, like all I'm doing is just surviving and I don't want it always be that way, I just want to feel passionate and excited for something, I'd like to be genuinely happy. 

I should mention that I'm in my first year of college in Ireland living away from home. I feel like I should say something to my parents that it might be helpful to be open and honest about what I'm feeling. Afraid they'll brush it aside and say I'm just having a rough day, when in reality I feel terrible the majority of the time and I've just been trying to cope with this for years because I never wanted to be a burden and maybe stupidly I thought feeling depressed like this was just a personality trait of mine, another just a fact of life, it's not.

I guess I'd like to know how people made their first step? What actually helped? How long did it take for things to start feeling more ok mentally? Did your passions come back? Anything you think might be beneficial or something along those lines?",6.061310210653431,5.786172581712066,6.4282503689789365,80.5438326848249,66.37354085603113,9.424285522608349,31.926472561384678,8.939507131559953,2.457892204481417,2033,73,409,30,29,658,221,514,0.107,0.682,0.21100000000000002,0.9954,2,1,5,0,0,0,43.0,0,5,3,5,34,34,1,3,14,1,49,6,1,9,5,110,103,32,0,13,31,1,15,11,0,13,3,3,2,1,41,16,0,5,26,0,0,6,11,10,1,2,12,23,50,24,53,64,7,51,0,1,3,2,24,20,0,16,35,274,91,2,0.0,0.0,0.05583975937306774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05926403612723589,0.0,0.0,0.14283818006141172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060001548963592125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941765505605712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752263776015364,0.04399966721674781,0.09555483324468994,0.10464476667296213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050607612327262456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04929110516096402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045686572237803806,0.0,0.06285493911084693,0.07380604223850072,0.0,0.0492846437710622,0.0,0.0,0.05978410616690812,0.0,0.0,0.05007476751734083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047801074941324906,0.0,0.05068111016792955,0.0,0.0,0.07558829159769034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285367534131798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40505950045112027,0.20439463170824249,0.0,0.0,0.10459850963658546,0.09734486040869428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958312331796205,0.0,0.0,0.04799453294805424,0.0,0.0,0.06303574118294512,0.0,0.0,0.060913164977891315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060823593173667985,0.06449259251214941,0.0,0.2684797379722371,0.0,0.057397654977607036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0645959114401343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258282968855805,0.0,0.05958720501129836,0.0628946880112301,0.0,0.06454814750385067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04041711440770227,0.3075099418460682,0.0,0.05052747872404384,0.05063907238158085,0.14415450548078304,0.0,0.0,0.04864752465172837,0.0,0.10828840340714793,0.03819567907510931,0.05801344277379505,0.05748651249298192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729969123914691,0.303513918507396,0.05777722674785073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04206425818284517,0.0,0.044132613777207376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353751023548967,0.0,0.0,0.07934012447368954,0.04996345426184744,0.05978410616690812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05752323672296781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109972338975457,0.11766610554138522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100938940249934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969668867432774,0.220258859598856,0.056593354024976936,0.0,0.20250774338399996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04302331546374648,0.04599233389908413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603061206597128,0.14666045943444275,0.0,0.04542734073078725,0.0667324300743216,0.06576749601870473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03884952388056842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012518609283536,0.04541962471630972,0.0,0.0,0.051448843593041485,0.0,0.051633346019396335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04165780643723367,0.058111033593387464,0.0,0.0812967756928338,0.0,0.0,0.07369731504217503
mentalhealth,TitaniumMonkey22,2020/01/24,"Why i won't end it? I am in the gutter lately. I have been on so much benzos that i don't feel even alive anymore. I am fucked up on every level. Family history of schizophrenia, and i am already a germophobic OCD person. Depression is the thing that sinks me a lot lately. I really want the pain to end on every level. I physically i am dying, Microscopic colitis and digestion issues that prompt me unable to eat like a human. 15-20 pills a day is my usual. It's been this way since i was 13. I am tired. The only reason i don't OD on valium every night is the sole hunger for knowledge. Learning is something i value a lot. I am currently enrolled in uni and half of my classes won't let me pass because bad attendance. I had a GI attack that put me in bed for 3 weeks. 10kg down. Gym is inconsistent nowdays. If i hit gym 5 times a week its a jackpot. I used to go every day but now its hard to even get to talk to people. Too much uni stress and stuff to do. I haven't had fruit for over a year now. Veggies 6 months. I do hit OKish macros because i eat for nourishment and not pleasure. I am a failure. My parents hate me, but fuck i am still not calling it quits, probably i am foolish but i have a wish that im gonna make true. I love clocks, i don't own any. I will get an art-deco table watch from Patek. Check them out they look beautiful. I know it sounds silly but i am who i am. I am like a cloth that absorbs the failures and bad things from everyone around. I am really sad. I am not ugly but i still think of myself as ugly because i am damaged on every single level. And before anyone suggests therapy, please don't worry about it. I won't take anyone's advice or opinion because me myself and i is the only valid thing i listen to. Everyone else failed me. I promise to whoever is reading this, i won't be a failure anymore, im gonna do something with this bad situation i am in. And this is not self pity either, its just pain, from not being accepted and not wanting to be myself. I am just a dead weight everyone has to carry. I will try and change that. This was my vent. Feel free to say whatever, either way i won't take your opinion or advice at heart.",0.6793922852983982,2.743386711790393,3.332123362445415,88.16767558224166,83.62882096069869,6.0000727802037845,21.113719068413392,7.251919499444523,0.7357378457059682,1686,53,356,25,48,590,226,458,0.165,0.713,0.122,-0.9693,2,0,2,0,0,1,54.0,0,1,2,2,12,24,4,1,22,0,53,14,1,3,1,50,77,21,3,4,18,1,4,2,0,9,5,3,1,3,25,14,6,0,8,3,3,4,16,15,0,1,6,10,61,10,40,56,8,43,0,5,2,3,14,18,2,7,21,245,86,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583236386421831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893963065269473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05508942825816364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067986731596287,0.11328784331845727,0.0,0.0,0.07211587915872507,0.0,0.09216031955842066,0.0,0.0,0.20291934724252747,0.1975312396228356,0.0,0.06893335602070867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272004268791258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856976055934018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448921249393904,0.0,0.06977360470083943,0.0,0.08407536171460184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16578645785000914,0.06767327613696827,0.0,0.14350123998392844,0.0,0.0,0.10701239117093367,0.0,0.34127116733577234,0.2322249488028881,0.0,0.0,0.07636881077960085,0.0,0.08192195755184685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14978447223895808,0.08464853285779761,0.0,0.04603972477360727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256885082488837,0.0799803861192247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599697919778796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17500892722427405,0.08455316318707927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04452085643008,0.0,0.1827651204714424,0.0,0.0,0.08283798850185985,0.0,0.07915457296897511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802781225989687,0.0,0.0,0.13774323582377315,0.0731144891694225,0.0,0.05407465711726626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466123341718978,0.0,0.11910301862452252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602219065893079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322317606960813,0.17240023480057698,0.0,0.08995177368918313,0.0,0.0,0.056161981282220594,0.07073461509326194,0.0,0.08892441152152418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734224424296479,0.0,0.0,0.08143720382489159,0.0,0.08616387258709847,0.08103170227111034,0.0,0.10379387872273517,0.08329154587044425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644222284504289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451086798527745,0.0,0.0,0.06701212704388973,0.0910583867553032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473057265380373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12938902970424035,0.0,0.0927964291423994,0.0,0.09273681653591144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181854534777176,0.0651125924669446,0.0,0.0,0.09264174335844896,0.0,0.16145789435234112,0.05190779591183073,0.0,0.0,0.04723745410802807,0.09310882494533723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055000322912959566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996643975987299,0.089220827555917,0.0,0.09556333412163028,0.12860358513850206,0.1299623179609476,0.09864808772499012,0.0,0.0,0.07309872607122986,0.0,0.09315724890076243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226936377052423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521676422290099
mentalhealth,mountaingothic,2020/01/24,"I am so isolated in spite of having so many people who love me and whom I love  I have a whole host of mental issues and trauma so idk if this is related to that or something else but honestly this is the most difficult thing for me.

I think that there is just something about uni, regardless of how many friends you have or how often you socialise, that is just inherently lonely. I live with people who I love but I just feel so disconnected from everyone. I hear my friends laughing and even though I know it's irrational my first thought is always that it's at my expense.

Does anyone know what this is?",4.155166666666666,5.59755151666667,4.851666666666667,84.02666666666667,71.33333333333334,8.333333333333334,27.5,8.841846274778883,2.027,482,17,96,9,9,155,75,120,0.126,0.6759999999999999,0.198,0.9337,1,2,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,1,14,11,1,0,2,0,10,3,0,2,0,22,19,15,0,2,8,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,14,4,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,4,0,1,1,2,16,7,10,18,2,3,0,1,0,3,11,2,0,5,1,76,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467396000381846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12330993036030775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543274638687044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473200781878398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647931601879083,0.0,0.0,0.16851259250188086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916923991837086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000554343387018,0.0,0.0,0.272499365989541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987623454721205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840664339426753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19383769856196026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572269296030672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4774956766967821,0.0,0.0,0.3575879804323233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777220748769749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445215584637837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271529897246018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716091874478825,0.11299970961671722,0.1732656634338572,0.14000437012221975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19689152694475626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,h0neynm1lk,2020/01/24,"someone i consider my best friend constantly tells me i’m just like my mother when i’m upset at her, it’s killing me inside. when i’m upset i try not to bring it up, but we text constantly so i’ll text really dry or as she says “passive aggressive” short replies. when i voice what’s making me upset like her talking about my “slutty” outfit behind my back, she told me that she decides never to speak to me because i get mad at her once a day and it’s impossible to talk to me, and that i can’t talk about my mother screaming at me over nothing and being afraid to talk to her when i’m the same way. she’s said it multiple times, and she knows being like my mother is my worst fear. it’s the reason i don’t want children, i couldn’t live with myself if i was like that to them. and now i’m struggling, and i can’t tell her i am because it’s my fault. and it’s my moms fault. and i’m becoming her which makes me not want to live anymore. i had been contemplating ending my life since probably grade 7, which seems like a long time and sure, i’ve had good times but there is always a lingering bad feeling no matter how happy i am. it got so bad that last year i wrote a note and had a plan all laid out, i just didn’t have the means/opportunity to go through with it. i was doing so good this year, i feel confident and pretty. but lately i’m back to planning. it’s going to kill me, i can feel it. on top of this, i can tell my friends don’t like me. the slight shifts, and minor tells that they never did before. i’m tired of being in this world and i don’t see how it’s worth it. what’s holding me back...
sorry about the long post, maybe this is the wrong place. i’m just using the space to say the things i can’t say to her. i love her but we’re drifting and i can see it.",0.8527798232695147,2.4279581881443306,2.8143564064801194,94.62990721649489,80.52061855670105,5.774491899852724,19.07540500736377,6.610729790773281,-0.11806650957290145,1379,31,330,13,35,463,178,388,0.17,0.669,0.162,-0.8519,0,0,0,0,0,2,38.0,1,0,2,4,20,31,4,6,13,0,28,3,0,6,4,52,58,30,2,4,11,4,3,6,2,0,2,7,0,1,28,18,0,1,7,0,1,4,13,17,0,0,12,12,61,14,32,42,4,42,0,0,2,1,39,13,0,3,29,208,89,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632821938030465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097331238074287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21160831267121788,0.15318446941034985,0.11183772719843632,0.1013105837503108,0.07805701903391958,0.0,0.09626688147070854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19825900950562664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059159432525151115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124716151533026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322379594362686,0.13914708718082927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14174354695549934,0.0,0.04792608775996271,0.0,0.1042666099671767,0.15388059011978442,0.07336631310236105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765022385994182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029753263715733,0.0,0.05041340706994103,0.07477367330841653,0.10347748398533088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06479289446078683,0.2688931904173472,0.0,0.16200174823528385,0.16235954102585035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279154537374353,0.0,0.12246339895556807,0.0,0.09215693874886484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743519420473216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14149846314611386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801915145631263,0.0,0.0,0.09769139021914068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095840223580305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785372269558618,0.09332423503770447,0.0989024126330106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058765750246012674,0.09431558474275796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.087257963374192,0.21884646574520344,0.0,0.0,0.1461967615601752,0.08350920006473103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588150611145253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07772407000128312,0.0,0.0,0.10268625779842244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589801117785736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645615096239577,0.0,0.0,0.2949222357903644,0.3207106016499017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06094254247948869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16046867876198653,0.10543222817703396,0.0,0.08765368125223473,0.0,0.06227988161781758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792268364016879,0.0,0.0,0.10821160351218058,0.07281244576261928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029434047553523,0.0,0.11814456389447292
mentalhealth,dons23,2020/01/24,"Independence problems So my mother and I have a rocky relationship. I’m an only child and while she loves me a lot, she can be way too overprotective and controlling. I decided I needed to set firm boundaries regarding communication after having enough. Unfortunately I’m still financially dependent on her for 6 more months as I’m in my final year of college.

Currently I told her that she can text me no more than 5 times a day (which is still a lot in my opinion) and I will respond whenever I have time. And that we can talk 3 times a week for about 20-30 mins on the phone because I usually see her on Sundays. So basically am I being mean for enforcing these rules considering she’s still paying for me? She reluctantly agreed to these but I still think it’s a lot of contact and will reduce it after graduating. We’re also planning on seeing a family therapist soon to help us work through problems but I just want to know if I’m right or am being too harsh? Now when we don’t talk, I miss her. Am I doing this independence thing all wrong?",3.63475703324808,5.459157227053144,5.462205171923845,77.58892583120208,73.34782608695653,8.928559249786872,27.152315998863315,9.478462496947786,2.507186075589656,834,31,162,21,17,286,129,207,0.105,0.8490000000000001,0.046,-0.887,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,3,0,0,3,14,5,0,0,9,0,17,1,0,4,1,30,31,16,0,5,5,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,9,8,0,1,4,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,30,1,22,25,7,31,0,1,2,1,23,7,0,7,22,119,39,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272159924288888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592481142701802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809292932403884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090426301016742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564411281791556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287975466912882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15440922592079442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944791122140008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746513818529646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35950449922058997,0.12721731927488206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15354123110865242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250887299890412,0.0,0.0,0.10451628774427787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720256894490016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697496456668128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15133283403904216,0.0,0.1203747322036583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22464564477441207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45026712733802615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22658845213259945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365952715525225,0.0936441861187307,0.09031822174218916,0.0,0.0,0.2465758435541456,0.0,0.0,0.1346884673204896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16955141440788654,0.0,0.1552419313065132,0.0,0.08313886430740483,0.11188345522423156,0.11306553520075835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261686111171868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15411207842710872,0.0,0.0907703476104064
mentalhealth,PLDGR_,2020/01/24,"I don't even know what to call this So first off, idk if this is the right subreddit or anything apologies if it isn't but I felt like I need to get this off of my chest and rant about it, even just to type it out. So read it if you want or whatever. I don't mind but here's a stream in consciousness without any punctuation cause I don't care about it at this point

So I've always found myself wanting to help other people no matter what the problem I've always wanted to solve the problem if it be big or small I'll try to help and usually I've been fairly successful in doing it. Because of cuffing season and all that I've found myself (unfortunately) on a few 'dating' apps, mainly Yubo and I've also been on the meet people subreddit as well (I'm 17 tinder isn't an option yet) now a few of these people o get along fairly well with and they clearly trust me with various issues in their life. I've had loads people tell me about their issues in life and they range from everything you could imagine, 1 was thinking about suicide, one found out they couldn't have kids and had various other issues with their reproductive organs, another's sister had stopped them from getting a dog that she loved and  others. And I've always always tried to help, give them advice and hopefully told them to do the right thing. The suicide girl I told straight away to get help and she's ok now by the way. But to be honest. I'm afraid. I'm afraid that I'm giving them bad advice in life. I'm afraid that I'm wrong and I don't help them. I don't know... I've tried to help so many people but I don't know if I'm helping them. I just give them my advice and I don't know if I'm right or not... I don't know if these people are talking to anyone else about their issues, friends irl or otherwise, and I feel like all that pressure is on me to make the right call, or what I think is the right call. I don't know how to feel. Like why do I always need to help people? I'm grateful that these people think I can help but can I help? I feel like I need to help everyone and solve everyone's problems. I love helping people and love that buzz you get when you help someone and can see that they're happy, but I don't know about me. I don't want help and don't think I need help but I feel like I needed to get this off of my chest, and tell in to Reddit who don't know me and won't think different of me. I've uninstalled these shitty dating apps now and hopefully I'll get less people asking me for help now, and can focus on people irl and myself.

Sorry about the long post guys and thanks if you read it. Like I said sorry if this is the wrong place but I felt like vent and rant isn't the right place for it. 

Cheers lads 
DP",1.852919746754857,3.402290906412478,3.215620556714889,92.98164397128004,77.54419410745234,6.027361793937677,19.40116011742652,6.68642624312137,-0.011524641884483877,2131,44,482,19,49,695,204,577,0.11599999999999999,0.6609999999999999,0.223,0.9972,1,0,0,0,0,2,45.0,0,5,14,2,26,33,0,4,17,1,40,8,2,3,3,108,103,56,2,25,27,1,6,7,1,1,3,2,0,3,35,31,0,1,24,2,0,0,21,10,2,2,14,9,62,23,58,84,8,44,0,0,1,3,61,29,0,18,20,291,97,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703703756107855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037382237469214805,0.19447936886135736,0.0,0.0,0.03178843923403408,0.04901657260597793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032685433822322245,0.04789613257477735,0.03846743799175771,0.0,0.04370058971011719,0.0,0.043918792694458725,0.0,0.03903041256845291,0.028495529932475862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431966785768055,0.0,0.047659997142020204,0.048020348432396345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037322356237359695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048838938847926526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03904973956467295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061749722253140425,0.0,0.0,0.08933436543762936,0.04201170413299253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454340885028496,0.13357954224119606,0.0897657284077696,0.0,0.0,0.03976156866330916,0.0,0.15376158212087593,0.03611533948503027,0.0,0.17095760290641954,0.1345271902762379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04628524327113055,0.0,0.04976129158949586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5013187367654817,0.0,0.0,0.09285735494385323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19515999167187087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20552016370800213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905286398979582,0.15986190896645552,0.0,0.0,0.041368161505251404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656850340855788,0.0,0.031202882408181788,0.047392445344534836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719947532648711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17330541413977762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0316758572129821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35648071949033044,0.0,0.09767787769585304,0.0,0.04418946277427471,0.0,0.044769121252072656,0.0,0.0,0.1341869532452028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351599481498764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23952162787368386,0.044465530004278116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037249989779184776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03960718120220131,0.0,0.0,0.10465517875044196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03908120358847455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226364607248244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03757213960010864,0.08171498811632585,0.04303683549885577,0.0,0.0,0.03105553174027185,0.14976265576611356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933436543762936,0.0,0.09521106742536094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148339608609405,0.0,0.11028646823093397,0.037104280991048295,0.0,0.0,0.08405936250086248,0.0,0.04218040530228679,0.0,0.0,0.04506084683269186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022173984636733,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sublimed4,2020/01/24,"Quick foods to eat when on your ADD meds. I am currently on Adderall XR for my ADD and as we all know, it kills your appetite.  I don’t like going ten hours without eating and was wondering if anyone has their go to snacks to get something in their stomach?  I am thinking of eating a banana or some of those small oranges (they are called Cuties here in the US).",5.954315068493153,5.3724660410958895,5.913801369863018,85.16878424657534,66.67123287671234,8.395890410958902,30.578767123287676,7.1686216300943375,1.6627013698630129,283,9,59,2,4,89,60,73,0.047,0.8759999999999999,0.077,0.29600000000000004,1,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,2,2,3,0,3,2,1,0,2,0,6,6,1,0,1,13,12,6,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,3,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,1,0,11,1,12,11,2,11,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,4,5,43,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739006003309954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21524131275832328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6470758536685822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548894724900761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012966593911576,0.0,0.23959491502417146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20758680353594552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23320915530537514,0.0,0.11584529301186555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298189920516244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341414272409311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227731107678187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506644546359955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535557767375935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20319512832278785,0.2285939899769291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PatoKw,2020/01/24,Idk why only me I an the only one in the world who got treated like shit during all the school years and everybody didnt give a shit about me and thus now I dont see any good in all humans and I feel so ready to become a self-centered person who looks at people as resources and inferior to me and i guess humanity will pay #NewtonLaw,2.0662441314554023,3.644785225352116,4.148943661971831,86.39318075117373,77.02816901408453,6.986854460093897,21.6924882629108,7.793537801064563,0.8471953051643188,265,7,57,4,6,91,52,71,0.20199999999999999,0.721,0.077,-0.8108,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,2,0,6,0,3,2,2,1,2,10,9,7,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,2,3,7,3,7,6,2,6,0,1,2,0,6,4,2,1,3,35,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522914074551336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473314900702813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624638162682885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132341595431394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148300413799304,0.0,0.18783583234019088,0.17911060097424514,0.0,0.24670249265878874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940902551633347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880587910007588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15175205180089962,0.34064305090970826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525641571113574,0.1955415844555197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266459746664215,0.17845649260715474,0.0,0.2336252060997867,0.0,0.4597560541556682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20207702690969895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442143058998705
mentalhealth,ImJustVenting75,2020/01/24,"Why do I always feel like I have to tell people about my problems, and when I do I instantly regret telling them? It’s always like this. It starts with me having a “problem” in life or something, then after a few weeks of having the “problem” I feel the need to tell someone about it. I start to give them “clues” about what’s wrong (eg. suicide jokes), and then I finally tell them. And then, when I’ve basically poured my heart out, I just regret everything I’ve just told them. Does anyone else have this problem or am I alone?",4.46142857142857,5.186128857142858,4.869523809523808,86.86714285714287,69.95238095238095,7.523809523809526,26.42857142857143,7.447530270364453,1.2052857142857143,410,12,85,4,7,130,62,105,0.239,0.716,0.045,-0.9655,0,1,1,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,4,0,7,10,0,0,4,0,7,2,1,0,0,18,14,10,1,7,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,16,3,11,13,1,12,0,2,0,0,10,2,0,2,12,57,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462599616151337,0.0,0.0,0.2350105066317677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874338351461696,0.14469522458864403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358141722323845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797008511317525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691824241517638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280881400612294,0.10088665214702863,0.0,0.1546981595973091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13546982441577626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16734481398018666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974692896672804,0.13798462618164842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047118607425462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790325059154044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5405088133540394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11965412803274293,0.10871703804026528,0.0,0.0,0.19991061500112253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154470313575002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4937253979448302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494049911337613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327710572433194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742789219830428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15440045607520408,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oriworld,2020/01/24,"My Brain Feels Disconnected from my Body Why do I feel this way?

It's very hard to explain the feeling. A while back, I was on a soccer team. It was the near end of practice and my team's coach was making us run before we dispatched. By the time I was finished running, I still had plenty of energy and I felt great (in my brain), but I started sobbing. I soon fell to my knees and began screaming at the top of my lungs. I just couldn't stop screaming. It would've been an insane sight to see. I was stranded on my knees, still screaming and sobbing, for about a minute before regaining the strength to get up and continue on with my day.

When I was going through all of that I felt like I had no control over my body and physical emotions, though I felt completely fine in my brain (like, my thoughts were sane...?).

Usually, at some point everyday, my body breaks down and cries just like the previous incident I mentioned (I don't scream every time this happens, but I just remember that detail vividly because my brain was so scared. Wait- I just thought if something: maybe I was screaming because my brain was scared). 

I don't believe I'm doing anything to trigger the breakdowns. 

I would list all the places that my body has gone AWOL, but there would be no point because I've had this happen everywhere. I've even given up on hiding them from the public. If you're ever out and you see this person sobbing and quickly stop, that's probably me.

I guess my questions are: **does this happen to you** and **how do you deal with it?**

I get so exhausted when this thing happens to me. I just don't think I can take it anymore.

(It makes no sense when I try to type out what I feel though everything makes sense to me. It's just hard to fine the words to encapsulate everything)

(In the subreddit rules, it says to disclose your country in looking for resources. I'm not sure what resources anyone could tip me with, but I'm in The States (Georgia to be specific))

(I apologize for rambling)

(I hope you have a ravishing day)",2.7155449656205306,4.887041775818645,3.4263326298590786,89.60830417319085,77.08564231738035,6.407760909524135,26.598747361971544,7.432916251226849,1.3814793246647152,1583,63,318,21,37,499,192,397,0.14800000000000002,0.764,0.08800000000000001,-0.9824,0,0,1,0,0,2,66.0,2,5,1,5,23,20,0,2,17,0,30,13,12,6,4,63,65,25,0,7,13,0,9,3,0,2,1,6,0,1,21,16,0,4,13,4,0,5,8,11,0,0,22,20,56,9,46,37,3,53,0,3,5,0,18,22,3,6,26,216,77,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785297348315909,0.05536763531144291,0.0,0.06516208686936935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06088798369307516,0.0,0.1448103872095586,0.0,0.13476033456545208,0.08921380223395624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3518244622972624,0.0,0.4419803838158029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302342937617263,0.0,0.08881213675963863,0.06322237056259057,0.0,0.08698044211920193,0.10213488829655766,0.08163573040062087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929487927740145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907189133405125,0.07013395338311218,0.0,0.0,0.052300607678638734,0.07162690301443987,0.06671634654476273,0.0,0.14233182437732778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601522259358315,0.0,0.2280885795014193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274125377679674,0.0,0.045002369476460496,0.0,0.0,0.08730117783509693,0.08723064113919357,0.0,0.2800903257744421,0.0,0.14186749609658428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864806372870098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605662357944757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649502700220647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15856878234201469,0.0,0.0795514615599668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06914084084679431,0.08273093665604392,0.0,0.14970987215863074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537427114634744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870474905503836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897005890872895,0.0,0.0,0.06297068328447339,0.15855497315633293,0.0,0.12619957016084332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060960087654507236,0.0,0.0,0.056047188339611344,0.0,0.12647366919727834,0.13240355563774958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746304430602892,0.0,0.05953688052853071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052606655464490525,0.050738222737422456,0.15559671531675773,0.1257272773455484,0.09234622376002824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0537610697115319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524918962896148,0.0,0.08721052670081705,0.06533549567199022,0.0,0.06285296103375096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145168428117682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168751165604295,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SmarmyYardarm,2020/01/24,"Say I go to a Dr. and they want to send me to a psych ward? Do they let you go home first, if I'm not immediate threat to anyone/myself?  I don't want to lose my job, how is that stuff usually handled? My family depends on my income, not much in savings.",-0.5306547619047599,1.293616767857145,2.5892857142857157,93.12238095238096,86.67857142857143,5.8761904761904775,18.261904761904766,7.1686216300943375,0.13571190476190464,193,5,47,3,6,69,42,56,0.0,0.846,0.154,0.733,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,2,2,1,3,1,0,2,0,4,1,0,2,0,9,9,3,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,0,1,9,1,7,8,1,7,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,2,2,31,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690146964645998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427294927431176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243565654316558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28624220362259006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831785944442076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918028460188929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3192480339381667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20977452756048376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22693199036686396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3266721885129228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142868613280357,0.0,0.3366288025103364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dudeitsjustapearchil,2020/01/24,"Artists who struggle 
I’m a musician who struggles with mental health looking for subreddit that addresses mental illness as an Artist/creative. This is not an attempt to diminish others struggles by the way, I just find advice I get from non creatives as well as creatives who don’t struggle with them can often miss the mark when I’m asking for input or feedback. It’s honestly caused me to step away from creating, which is terrible as that’s where much of my identity... help!",13.936816479400749,8.83537968539326,12.287865168539328,59.80423220973786,55.51685393258428,15.462172284644197,52.138576779026224,12.45797560212912,6.424480149812736,388,20,63,8,3,123,67,89,0.18,0.7170000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.7424,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,5,8,0,4,5,0,4,2,0,1,0,8,10,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,9,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,6,1,0,0,1,5,2,15,10,1,5,0,1,1,0,6,2,0,2,1,46,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17640073577666096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16876056975405868,0.0,0.16960321421729774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854423799540506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649907759543281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943135441213383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918828837795179,0.0,0.0,0.1209978460904801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15159020142334062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638406820178752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270197867338138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7548691521553464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14328730211423976,0.0,0.0,0.16230794599007786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RealKingMcQueen,2020/01/24,"I started a Mental Health Youtube Channel!! Hello MentalHealth Reddit.

I have been following this page for quite some time (3 years?) and I have enjoyed reading and answering the questions and discussions that have come from this page. I have received countless emails with questions from students, clients, and professionals alike. I noticed that I was getting repeats of the same questions and I thought it would be a good idea to start a youtube page addressing some of the things I am commonly asked and the patterns I see in my sessions. This first video is to address the most common question I get ""How do change people?"" (It's impossible by the way.) My video is about raising your emotional intelligence to change the people around you instead.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sfljX_VPXN8

~Brandon",7.882146274777853,10.797707481203007,5.62771018455229,76.24994531784006,64.41353383458647,8.144634313055366,38.4066985645933,8.841846274778883,3.7998330827067663,657,35,96,11,11,186,89,133,0.0,0.905,0.095,0.9006,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,0,2,4,2,0,0,10,0,12,1,0,1,0,22,21,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,8,9,0,0,7,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,1,14,2,13,16,7,14,0,0,1,0,11,2,0,7,8,70,22,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253139005596276,0.13917915908368975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3149825787678015,0.12824367209501594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674656975122145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12663402775836174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556334966325444,0.0,0.0,0.12487030115563612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582484489469697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680631192657409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500322031309869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16949655127549135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20642403682682198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6671017063031214,0.15834817435199255,0.1489164975296825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186350639140854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21075069470997765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989067383570619,0.0,0.0,0.11819108071939413,0.08681091499782785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11817100549431438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575738777095356,0.0,0.0,0.09587139782814864
mentalhealth,concordepoop,2020/01/24,"Is it okay if I hit myself? Title might sound a bit obvious, as in, no, but let me continue.

I’m a pianist, not a very good one, but I can learn most intermediate pieces smoothly. But whenever I come across a difficult piece and I can’t seem to play right or I get stuck on the same damn notes I always feel very angry. I usually bite my finger real hard, or just put that anger into the instrument by hitting the keys harder, put today I was playing and I told myself that if i didn’t get a section which was especially difficult for me right, I would punch myself. I missed a few notes, then, with complete anger punched myself in the face real fucking hard. 

This surprised me because whenever I try to punch myself or do something similar my body always makes me punch softer than I would normally, but that didn’t happen this time.

Is this normal? I wouldn’t consider myself mentally unstable or anything, I don’t get into many fights, I don’t shout a lot, don’t get angry at others much.

But genuinely, is this fine to do?",4.083858784893266,5.416488650246304,5.440709359605916,80.15975041050905,71.36453201970444,8.566042692939245,27.3264367816092,9.029198982220553,2.2211723481116583,808,28,154,16,15,271,118,203,0.23800000000000002,0.706,0.055999999999999994,-0.9911,0,0,1,0,1,0,25.0,0,0,0,0,1,14,5,0,11,1,19,4,3,1,1,35,35,15,0,7,13,0,5,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,10,6,0,0,3,2,0,3,9,8,0,1,6,7,29,6,15,22,9,18,0,1,0,1,2,10,2,10,5,110,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23392272283083024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11567303884265707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08568713469890135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15346060152180335,0.1561360549067926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108432275218182,0.1473797545854068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107390025948353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299501007845617,0.29375769628742665,0.0,0.0,0.11789927409509045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12430118758208936,0.0,0.2518373056312387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437372618629448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950335779221948,0.0,0.0,0.09382824584205043,0.14251087302360754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14165648417860094,0.1491172784554794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033314671584271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754477598767301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525049894294543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28261334934036075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31998754460960904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24008352701338034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279651197104112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821382380290613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196459660186013,0.0,0.13323920807496173,0.13431590538295224,0.0,0.09543442519622623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15481251640659474,0.23196173393958475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19970672182247126,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,natsicles-,2020/01/24,"Pain 24/7 It is so painful inside me. I feel like a black hole. It hurts so much to be alive. I don’t want to kill myself , but I would like someone else too. I hate my brain. I over analyze everything . It gets so bad sometimes I can’t breathe. Too many years of this . I am so tired of trying to fight this. I am worthless, better off dead . I just annoy everyone because of being depressed. Kill me now. Anyone know a hit man?",-1.1017803030303028,0.8712684431818225,0.9116363636363652,98.9757878787879,103.20454545454544,3.7103030303030304,17.23030303030303,5.6839178017228535,-0.4731842424242427,325,10,73,3,15,106,63,88,0.439,0.465,0.096,-0.9936,0,0,0,0,1,2,16.0,0,0,0,1,8,14,5,0,2,0,8,5,2,0,0,6,14,5,3,2,2,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,11,0,0,0,2,13,3,8,10,1,4,0,3,1,0,2,2,0,0,4,46,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13481142388124384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16098135706652508,0.1175301201547504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17051742614583115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152304483824424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16605981230670505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610610714706212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842302762698736,0.17327772623835613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748632705150947,0.13773756521660385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007309249584658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903517521292184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063981958008784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4266130060846627,0.0,0.10595876612956336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18838633300949775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19547065132565025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417314255351369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41030918146430906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16336024550925884,0.0,0.19068580044627628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22159717934616813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089969106360866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11371943155066737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13696078818590315,0.0,0.0,0.12415796652868792
mentalhealth,UnStableyStableBP1,2020/01/24,"#currentmanicstate Current manic state: Halsey, dying my hair and cutting it off... those moments when your body takes your mind over #manic #depressed #bp1sucks #stillfighting",11.5728,15.22976728,7.693000000000001,62.17150000000001,56.2,8.200000000000001,40.5,8.841846274778883,4.432600000000001,142,7,15,2,2,39,23,25,0.059000000000000004,0.941,0.0,-0.128,2,0,0,0,2,0,10.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,6,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,9,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5157968562366944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3999507100860694,0.0,0.4819301046960756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4688690248416642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3491392907274232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_prototype_,2020/01/24,"Ever Had This Problem? I've never been to a psychiatrist or psychologist so I'm not sure if these are symptoms to some mental issue, but I'd like your input.

So the issue that I have is that I have anxious feelings around things that I'm doing.  


For example, I would get feelings of wanting to play a video game, so I would play the video game and it would feel great.  Then about 10 minutes in, I'll start thinking of a book I want to read instead of playing the game.  


I would then start to read the book for another 5-10 minutes.  Then I would again start thinking of say, writing a blog.  And how I should do that instead.  So I do it, but then after 10 minutes of that I would want to play the game again.

It's very frustrating because I end up no being able to relax and do one thing.

Do these sound like anything you can attribute to a specific mental health issue?

  
Thoughts?",3.594636992221261,4.731909466292137,4.466853932584272,87.42494814174593,72.31460674157303,6.825237683664651,27.73725151253241,7.010146845296331,1.2795785652549694,687,25,142,6,13,222,94,178,0.071,0.7609999999999999,0.168,0.9577,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,0,12,11,1,0,10,0,20,2,0,2,3,33,35,16,0,12,5,0,3,2,0,7,2,2,0,0,13,4,0,0,6,16,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,5,13,9,20,24,1,16,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,3,15,102,26,4,0.12341088741769395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294070758509507,0.0,0.13941917526948192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155664505567727,0.10986185442928097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523013151138233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930541596003172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163221307594827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18720075828196786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447709507920787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606093905671293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118000237174218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3864267099267668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058465173515576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487382959330729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518208441640673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362641121309951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808755225433135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468885683130023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814129102487147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620525839197862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631330088331585,0.12827116521182236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639774197927027,0.1581534270880596,0.0,0.09797445947975457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182690675328993,0.2183728165943825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5260053215411412,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,evendosed,2020/01/24,"I Want To Be Better (TRIGGER WARNING; child abuse, sexual assault, no details but it brushes over it)  

in order to explain my present i feel like i need to share a part of my past, here goes:

born,  raised, brainwashed, conformed, molded and sculpted into the idea  of  righteousness. i wish could say the church i was born into was one of   light and love, peace and helping others love themselves as christ loved  the church that he gave himself for it, but that's not the case. the   adult i am today is the product of childhood trauma i was raised into.

from  a young age, i understood what i was around wasn't healthy, nor was  it  right, but i had no solid facts to back up my case, and in turn i   started to question myself. i began to think maybe it was the devil   working on my spirit trying to cause division in my relationship with   the lord. there was no real outside influence into my life to show me   more to life than what i was living. my life, my truth, and my facts   were what came from the church told us. what they said was final and   solid. being born into that life, even if you question things, it   doesn't really go beyond that, there is a guilt attached to you for even   allowing your mind to go there. my only real outside connection to the   world was going to school and even that was closely monitored and   critiqued.

it's hard to explain into words how brainwashing happens and more so  harder to explain how  it makes you doubt every single part of how your  thought process works.  even now at 30, and having been out since i was  about 24. i struggle  greatly with trusting myself on my thoughts and  decisions. i am  exhausted in my body, mind, and soul. every single part  of me aches and  feels it mentally, physically, and emotionally. it's my  identity, it  has been since i was a child, i feel like i am trapped in  my past, a  part of me i can't let go, even though i have been steadily  trying to  cut the umbilical cord since i separated myself from the  church/cult.  rationally i know that's not true but I'm not a rational  person,  mentally. my head is sick from all the years of abuse i endured  as a  child.

i have absolutely no  concept of trusting others, i am so heavily guarded  emotionally that i don't even know how to begin to unlock that door, and  let my husband  love me. the rational part of me knows hes a good man,  that he loves  me, fully and beautifully. i grew up in chaos, constant chaos, that when  i was younger i  use to repeat in my mind over and over ""one day you'll  grow up and get  to choose the life you want"" it was how i self  soothed. yet here i am  now, an adult, and still living in chaos, not  the same kind but chaos  never the less.

i  have this paranoia and fear that everyone is out to get me, use me,   that no one could actually love me for being me. it's not even a fear,   it's a fact, my entire life, since i was a child, men have wanted   something from me, and had no problems taking it from me. my innocence,   my trust, completely breaking down the already broken me. i was raised  not just in a cult but around molesters and predators.

now for my present day:

i  severely battle with my mental health, i have been diagnosed with  bipolar 1 with mania, depression, ptsd, generalized anxiety, and  borderline personality disorder. it has caused so many complications in  my life, and has spilled over into every single crevasse of it  (marriage, friendships, working, motherhood, ect) i am short and snappy,  constantly tired, it's hard for me to crawl out of bed, or even shower  most days. i do bare minimal, not because I'm a lazy person, quite the  opposite in fact, i am hard working, determined, and a go getter, but my  mental health has stolen that from me. these days, i do what needs  done, the most, first, because i literally have no energy for anything  else. it has stolen so much from me. who i am, what i believe, and what i  want in life.

i have ceased  communication with my family, it's only been a month but it's a start, i  am currently selling and packing up the rest of my shit to move 1000  miles away, and starting fresh. i am going to (re)fully commit to EMDR  therapy and meds. I've done meds in the past but never stayed on them  long enough to make it work. while I'm still battling my mental health, i  feel hope for the future, knowing that the main source of my problems  are no longer fueling and filling my brain.

i  am forever grateful, to have a husband who has more than loved me  through all my bullshit, and trust me when i say it's a lot. the saying  is true ""hurt people, hurt people"", and i am an extremely hurt person. i  just want to be the best wife and mother i can be.

TL;DR: over coming childhood trauma and changing my life.",6.109172468752625,5.89332722682661,6.510400763358778,79.79540736934823,66.26281352235551,9.452973743813438,31.484124653971982,9.004326427715196,2.452166361882392,3645,127,723,55,52,1183,374,917,0.18600000000000005,0.684,0.13,-0.996,2,1,1,0,2,0,136.0,1,7,2,9,38,44,6,5,46,0,78,28,4,14,12,148,137,62,0,14,20,4,7,2,0,1,17,4,3,13,51,56,0,1,20,2,1,12,22,21,0,4,36,13,118,23,110,91,23,105,8,4,0,7,55,46,1,9,46,527,169,6,0.0,0.11186873351489604,0.0460686974979111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05209576656183432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03611438222602284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03884858269342977,0.08405116837622187,0.0,0.0,0.04435395074015215,0.03630043148063356,0.0,0.057555741103012224,0.0,0.0,0.053187826541361366,0.04954242048295071,0.04175209222912033,0.0,0.05243801408834062,0.0,0.05270031183612466,0.0,0.053993960880180776,0.0,0.09699229137344573,0.049940345740752165,0.04066595269200608,0.0494972263254586,0.10203126000762497,0.0,0.07538431038279086,0.0,0.0,0.12178233830439733,0.0,0.040660621941656434,0.04791564563206395,0.0,0.0,0.054105044348216134,0.0,0.0,0.09662139580421072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0394366538515027,0.10620644311432163,0.0,0.048779012204442425,0.0,0.2494462138873348,0.0,0.11932562155093013,0.04510975599430918,0.0,0.0,0.04450398336960063,0.10624540079324177,0.09548016786628756,0.06745154036538005,0.0,0.051714617020499586,0.0,0.04015553592542412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0493289977951416,0.0,0.16097811067757864,0.03959625981131743,0.0,0.052047550796824334,0.0,0.0,0.04174633097728861,0.0,0.12686866132755853,0.0,0.04844955264794915,0.15054132106478205,0.0,0.0,0.03164287027182009,0.0,0.0,0.04688870406449192,0.0,0.0,0.1516130644553421,0.05329266345608024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04916040028165875,0.10377825365817556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965478033512258,0.3001029113417805,0.04612738843355234,0.0,0.08337196144125264,0.04177804727874688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040134988444874516,0.29825267459309274,0.0,0.06302409626382431,0.047862021182837916,0.04742729524594613,0.0,0.10487602817668124,0.0,0.2378753811058127,0.0,0.14300141751320314,0.0,0.0376813836339736,0.05017517682842145,0.03470368797173174,0.07000902647970296,0.0728202290525957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09596912785723943,0.07180840087162964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25561108861169585,0.13519759848221674,0.06545687579713888,0.16488260595549284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034434007350356,0.05518422386775156,0.0,0.10576867453226013,0.05021206319086615,0.0,0.10746724311914338,0.030242981430429788,0.0,0.0,0.05068427426072564,0.0,0.0403158110387175,0.04490610525578828,0.1126263099158928,0.0,0.04777753417051659,0.0,0.0,0.049248773484527456,0.053332180838948126,0.04845885884329952,0.15620547483080344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03634341869670957,0.0,0.0,0.10024328266115412,0.05031799216717215,0.07540155683168502,0.0,0.0,0.04935258648321049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03549492561768623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05398704737793968,0.0,0.03136323747786085,0.030249308093583643,0.046382123042859005,0.07495657007685991,0.0,0.054259239532864184,0.044748149133939936,0.04510975599430918,0.0,0.06410296117626174,0.05134930445127117,0.0,0.0,0.05678602693005948,0.08154599344200568,0.0,0.0,0.13922401662003628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05428745863022782,0.0,0.0,0.17184179379801098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03040073373528662
mentalhealth,redditreadr999,2020/01/24,"I wrote this article debunking Trump and Dr. Drew's speeches at last month's White House mental health summit [You can read the article here.](https://www.madinamerica.com/2020/01/trump-dr-drew-wrong-deinstitutionalization/)

Tl;dr: President Trump and Dr. Drew declared at last month's White House mental health summit that laws regulating the admission of Americans into psychiatric hospitals need to be loosened. It  needs to be easier to admit someone with mental health issues into a psych unit who *doesn't want* to to be admitted. 

My article rebuts Trump and Drew's argument by pointing out that there are many examples in the past year of Americans being wrongfully admitted to psychiatric hospitals against their will, and subsequently mistreated and abused.",11.083822314049591,13.391644355371904,9.42279958677686,54.44510847107441,55.85950413223141,13.653305785123965,38.26549586776859,12.815532586354998,6.1443132231404975,641,28,81,23,8,196,79,121,0.05,0.8859999999999999,0.064,-0.1027,0,0,0,0,1,0,28.0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,8,5,0,0,0,17,15,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,5,9,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,17,9,0,13,0,0,2,0,7,7,0,0,6,44,9,2,0.0,0.1773579238931317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47733974141441204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3454438402352425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15623725030668167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440343156337076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15176195248848331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4525563032240462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23896192477596226,0.0,0.0,0.22198616539385502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14289584246790646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14150523572454635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973029835083207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126831673447388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882909165696581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273245737029528,0.0,0.09639531709546656
mentalhealth,BrassMagster97,2020/01/24,"Anxiety in Counseling Sessions Is it normal to have a major fear of having panic attacks in counseling sessions? Also having trouble opening up or going blank about things you had planned on talking about? 
I’ve lied to counselors before claiming that everything was perfect when it wasn’t, I’m trying to break the habit so that that counseling can actually help me this time, but I’m struggling. Any tips?",9.051301369863015,9.238669438356164,8.500102739726028,66.62631849315069,60.09589041095891,10.587671232876714,41.53767123287671,10.125756701596842,4.6370849315068465,331,17,48,6,4,105,58,73,0.196,0.75,0.053,-0.8496,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,2,5,6,1,3,2,0,8,0,0,0,1,5,11,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,3,0,2,1,10,8,1,9,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,2,34,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.2725271582396388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22333205534752015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18991312321187556,0.0,0.21364072557259514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177098524515999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376381340176449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509897980397749,0.0,0.0,0.3142563033774348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871553218153464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18718874164210295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736252284775154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276630808456507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919535579805621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22446658436661168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855345266365284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284453707148153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18960594495757824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChanteBella,2020/01/24,"How do I move on when the one person I trusted blocked my number and told me he never wants to see me again? I guess long story short I have severe depression and anxiety. And my best friend (who also is an ex but we’ll get to that later) has always been there for me. We broke up a couple months ago for various reasons and drifted but eventually broke no contact as I found out I was pregnant and ended up getting an abortion. He was angry but eventually calmed down, had a few deeply emotional chats and then agreed we’d work on being friends again. So last night we met up and after having a deep conversation about how he’s afraid of having a friendship because he doesn’t want to hurt me again he shut down. He tends to do this instead of dealing with emotions so it wasn’t super surprising to me. He then started asking me though about me bringing my dog up as an ESA and kept pushing as to why I don’t voice concerns about whether I’m well enough to really take care of him to my therapist. So obviously I got worked up and ended up having a panic attack with him holding me and calming me down. He then just gets up, states he’s done with me because he doesn’t want to be my crutch, and leaves. 

So obviously that sent me into a bit of a spiral and when I get really bad my memories get foggy and I lose time.  But I remembered talking throughout the night and that at some point I did try and overdose. This morning I woke up feeling like absolute crap but I was really concerned about some of the things I remembered from the night before so I asked him to help me fill in some of the gaps since we were on the phone for some of it. He was fine answering questions and did help, then he expressed that he thought I might kill myself. I hadn’t specifically told him and I guess I just drew on our past and caved and told him that I did try. His immediate response was (copy and pasted from the messages) “Listen, I told you I'm done.  Leave me out of this.  You told me I dont owe you anything so just leave me alone now.  I hope you get better, but I'm done for good now.  I'm not going to call anyone on you, im not taking responsibility to make sure you dont end your life.  Stay safe, but dont call me”. I had no idea what to do and tried to ask if we could come back to it at a different time as he plummeted what little will I had left. And I know that was guilting him but he’s super pro-mental health and he should know that’s not the best way to react to someone who just told you they made a suicide attempt. He had an aggressive reply to me afterwards then blocked my number saying “I'm blocking you.  I tried to give you hope to keep pushing on without me.  You wanna guilt me?  Fine, fuck off”. 

So now I’m pretty low and idk what to do. I have a therapist I can talk to and I’m already on medication. I just feel like shit because he was the one person besides my therapist I trusted to tell that stuff to and I just keep thinking about how maybe if I didn’t push him so hard or make him worry so much things would have been different. I know I should respect his wishes to not have anything to do with me and I’m not implying that I want to go against that because he’s kind of an ass. I just feel really lost with my go to person literally said “Fuck you”. It feels like he really doesn’t give a shit what happens to me and I don’t know how to move forward.


TLDR: Told someone I tried to commit suicide and they blocked my number and told me to fuck off.

*also I didn’t include my specific texts because I deleted them. I had some idea that if I only saw his that it’d be easier to convince myself that he was just being an asshole and it’s not my fault. Safe to say deleting them made it worse as now I don’t have anything to convince me that it really wasn’t my fault.",2.9522646724806627,4.062189804045513,4.347620047569052,87.77124000942813,73.84197218710494,7.233761169084402,25.29047119072618,7.653070788468383,1.1466135593220337,2969,94,645,37,59,986,312,791,0.154,0.69,0.156,-0.7267,3,1,0,0,0,4,53.0,7,12,4,10,45,52,9,4,26,0,65,10,4,10,5,134,143,72,3,15,28,1,5,3,2,6,3,5,0,3,34,44,0,10,18,1,1,14,24,23,1,2,47,12,117,29,95,83,12,84,0,7,2,4,97,34,7,15,38,442,151,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046248327201803885,0.0,0.0,0.0540356227166047,0.057574340599694476,0.08344565812899044,0.04341221934752084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03991229767894175,0.0,0.0,0.03648066195584697,0.0,0.12880210885190402,0.0,0.14632448654212316,0.059354461433300414,0.0,0.04011791252752187,0.0435623799471972,0.15902126316729942,0.0,0.044395486484891215,0.0,0.1095049513335446,0.04614288909437616,0.05695953957653727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654918748124204,0.0,0.05319397790483854,0.0,0.0,0.0449425273034735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04165599479854419,0.05772857025850951,0.0,0.0,0.05378820076948846,0.04493663595266826,0.0,0.0,0.10901962189510292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017366242168735,0.1834395411521776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737548621130656,0.138629708345211,0.05390878468870995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552119813276598,0.1118174723764068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057205138427921964,0.08061765362124447,0.1446996395533144,0.16354982609545035,0.10009843077735556,0.08895356748657743,0.04376034175723075,0.041727614019781915,0.0,0.11494915806646495,0.0,0.046136521969038884,0.0,0.0467368719876711,0.0,0.0,0.05545759195246811,0.0,0.0,0.06994109160172686,0.0,0.0,0.1036393701927047,0.0,0.0,0.05585240918411614,0.1177942147618998,0.05635592775278817,0.0,0.0,0.09274774109075316,0.05772183251566245,0.0543302808775078,0.11469193981175785,0.04252806017799556,0.0,0.16573141792197793,0.056686252767416935,0.0,0.03685142099906299,0.0764674602540556,0.05229117743577455,0.0,0.04617157366830802,0.0,0.05836838129890232,0.05695312886788905,0.0,0.0,0.09873494438565587,0.06965193188921548,0.0,0.05241491642072936,0.0,0.0,0.052558934359457125,0.0,0.05534744057759769,0.0,0.0,0.04164409046625919,0.11090354979000497,0.038353249855311314,0.0,0.04023913022803488,0.0,0.0,0.14688283000191382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070771925072626,0.03968001243244428,0.0,0.06121392064204975,0.0,0.0,0.09961030229506117,0.0,0.1366666805302572,0.0,0.0,0.049320466793922615,0.0,0.0,0.05307882451325496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058445840172738975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20054063835214914,0.05364266173093525,0.0,0.0,0.11820395974387753,0.0,0.04962858922391965,0.0829803258567125,0.0,0.0,0.0415752255998861,0.0,0.0,0.0589407805507869,0.10710992574819332,0.043158147988719295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884122386942102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036928406277276594,0.05560960919707258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05972574560181071,0.11413786101241208,0.0,0.049172552694061296,0.0,0.07845539366995857,0.08386956288604475,0.04560161071140312,0.0,0.0,0.18173105745850585,0.06932301167758775,0.03343043172266083,0.051259830232786484,0.041419633308089336,0.06084513728893798,0.0,0.0,0.3988292527229135,0.0,0.1771106350758117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309224309849187,0.04141259801865532,0.0,0.0,0.04690990494860274,0.0,0.04707813013460602,0.0,0.0599965187144087,0.050293030518841576,0.0,0.07596531248769316,0.05298434079283288,0.05316887146068886,0.037062290948114814,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RYUKnumber2,2020/01/24,No care for anything So for the past year-ish I’ve just not really cared about anything. I dropped out of school midway through my exams because i just didn’t want to. I don’t really have any hobbies anymore i just exist. A few days ago my grandma died and to be honest I didn’t care at all. Today was her funeral and I didn’t feel anything for her or everyone else who were in tears. I went to a doctor around 2 years ago before i dropped out and all they said was that i was just very ‘laid-back’. Googling this just tells me im a sociopath so i thought I’d come here and ask,0.2052649769585244,2.3391200564516157,1.852995391705072,97.55306451612906,86.33870967741936,4.833179723502305,20.953917050691246,6.1826913282559595,0.03010783410138274,453,15,105,4,14,147,81,124,0.11,0.795,0.095,-0.1898,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,10,4,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,0,2,20,20,7,2,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,8,0,0,2,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,10,2,16,4,14,9,3,15,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,6,65,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28021055755026275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107482097101477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567470352040503,0.0,0.0,0.390194769397345,0.14070151336427847,0.14775909543824906,0.0,0.0,0.12153372151210595,0.0,0.09634821302837958,0.0,0.13449225921582414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4834395677272124,0.0,0.0,0.1361494717254662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193171392794542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16403503317011667,0.0,0.0,0.16177490190002006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203378337568447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510273101138284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991681956715402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707253742169421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15088036709985386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20250679856643375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503454881317856,0.0,0.0,0.15995902240204848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13814610750001247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12547717122982185,0.0,0.0,0.14981665157142432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041105082213686,0.09322430711449484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465175831295738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035631069299633
mentalhealth,Intelligent-Shoe2,2020/01/24,"Never Feeling Fulfilled- How to Overcome It? Hi guys! I'm 27, have a really good job that I've worked at for five years with a great boss. In the last semester of my masters and graduate in May. I got married last year and she's the best wife a guy could ask for. Decent but smaller friend group since college, engaging church on weekends and I'm in decent shape and enjoy outdoors stuff. My question is this, I feel like nothing ever really gets me super excited or that I never feel fulfilled as I picture it in my head. I'm not a sad person or a downer and I'm super happy with how my life is.... and yet I feel like I've never found my purpose... I'd like to become a manager in higher education or private sector IT and use my skills and knowledge I've acquired. I want to buy a house and have kids in the next five years. My wife and I have plans on trips to take. Yet I feel like I'm sleepwalking through life because nothing is as fulfilling or exciting as I think it should be. I'll occasionally buy stuff I don't need and then wonder why I did it (not too often). I'm a go-getter and want to be really good at everything I do and to everyone I know. One example is I'll buy books that look interesting and I love the topics, but I never feel like sitting down to enjoy them. A lot of this I realize sounds like depression and maybe to some extent it is, but it's more to me like I don't know what brought me here or what to do with my time... I have hobbies like reading, walking, podcasts on sports, business, leadership, and video games, I love to fish, etc... My wife and I also have a ton of the same interests so that's always been good too. I'd bet 9/10 people would say you've got everything going for you.

Yet... here I am posting this haha. Does anybody have suggestions for how to fix what I'm feeling/thoughts? I've felt this way since the late teenage years. Thanks.

TLDR: Never really feel fulfilled, not necessarily in a sad pointless way (generally pretty happy) but just like I lack a purpose or haven't found my calling.",2.988414918414918,4.466939653846153,4.58694055944056,84.62927156177159,74.33653846153847,7.542424242424243,26.54836829836829,8.199878495009871,1.6800169871794877,1600,58,327,26,33,538,198,416,0.037000000000000005,0.69,0.273,0.9989,1,0,0,0,0,0,59.0,0,1,1,8,15,33,0,0,18,1,25,5,1,5,6,76,61,36,0,7,14,3,8,9,1,3,2,2,0,4,20,20,0,0,17,6,4,4,11,3,0,3,8,11,38,30,39,47,9,42,1,3,1,2,21,14,0,13,29,202,58,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414978821114273,0.06674726377289171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499239650688957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04889975383731361,0.08859376402946086,0.0,0.0,0.08418316295450096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191088624917185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404702902385516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690910885939409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019874618416104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946355309291999,0.0,0.07256118831724354,0.0,0.07665111842917632,0.14418836886048325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28392212756458995,0.2292291720411596,0.07702123863933515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17590837424124195,0.06197572793886795,0.0,0.04191025609255107,0.0,0.09117874063730824,0.201847529425738,0.1283142903750602,0.08843991487294339,0.0,0.1588555824455101,0.0,0.17078572780497228,0.0,0.0,0.08232614688332758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925600551722544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960334511035609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817071868588078,0.13077569832246727,0.09048866820422988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331977746356828,0.35271132066036864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06736237326210506,0.0,0.0,0.06819792491960723,0.1447985859513584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058911303202675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948015081797421,0.3093428393768316,0.0,0.085312064959898,0.0,0.0,0.15394142735200686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05435735443317435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05561261226244873,0.07004269851071739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682605004808862,0.08160988665841114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986179396195416,0.0,0.08023906095342914,0.0,0.2055571616541399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379205879317475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271324668717038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836593546993744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060313466282089966,0.0,0.0,0.07385336109971953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05140004076666764,0.0,0.06368361791550221,0.046775383624270736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928203736611384,0.0,0.0,0.0946285463168925,0.12734560199948744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238368407001335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699229748365539,0.05839918836694721,0.0,0.0,0.056984106021816375,0.0,0.0,0.20662938120714136
mentalhealth,TripleSexes,2020/01/24,"Can someone help me with weed? I am not asking for weed but I use it to be in the present moment (Most of you won’t or don’t want to understand). It makes me grounded, myself, it basically changes me how I see the world. It also reminds me how I saw and was as a child. I remember my perception change when I was really sick when I was a child. The feeling how I saw was different. Like a dark cold feeling. I didn’t tell anyone because that was something I was really scared of and now I can’t find an answer what it was. I went to a doctor and he didn’t diagnose me with anything, he suggested me to take Abilify and I don’t know if it works. My childhood was traumatic and it can make sense that I have anhedonia or derealisation. But what freaks me out is that there was literally a switch in my vision and I can remember the before and I want to go back to the before. Weed made realise all of this. 

Does anyone know what it can be?",1.5567913832199594,3.3814418673469437,3.888299319727892,86.57971655328802,79.3061224489796,7.416780045351475,23.64399092970521,8.344100000000001,1.4114385487528347,730,25,160,15,18,253,103,196,0.086,0.84,0.07400000000000001,-0.8014,1,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,1,9,3,0,1,11,0,24,3,0,7,1,37,42,19,0,3,6,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,0,2,15,10,0,0,10,0,0,2,7,2,0,0,15,6,28,1,16,24,2,14,0,0,3,0,9,5,0,4,8,118,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832756726757352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22440830145376434,0.0,0.13205289652776336,0.0,0.15001751487657775,0.0,0.0,0.12339130001352602,0.0,0.09782084438488696,0.0,0.27309580419198515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33951134643476233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16287337544960254,0.0,0.16765669030500233,0.0,0.16424754550954607,0.14042812259016146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622766115716332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466664056793471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911986329089268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755946251168612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17637990940751558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839739354174707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518403174162092,0.21422955190821227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20560200762222614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635617942368672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606581715695301,0.0,0.12787358094981272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596546258607944,0.12353742082419494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12065324948510148,0.0,0.1402575975140933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16705462497867918,0.0,0.13859430496124686,0.0,0.0,0.189298382450535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875702671046026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682385838694598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PutinsSpliffRoller,2020/01/24,"I’d like some advice. So I was abused by my uncle until he started getting symptoms of motor neurone, I’m also gay. I’ve tried being with women and the guilt of having to be deceitful is far too painful for me to force myself to be straight. I accept the fact that I’m gay, I’ve always known. But having sexual urges and relationships makes me feel quite distressed. The last couple of years have convinced me to get a castration. I’m dealing with the past, but I want everything to stop. I don’t want to feel gross anymore.",3.063904761904759,4.958553104761903,4.3561904761904815,84.6104761904762,75.09523809523809,6.571428571428571,25.0,7.3871296695380915,1.2661428571428568,416,14,79,5,9,137,73,105,0.157,0.7509999999999999,0.092,-0.8396,0,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,2,5,0,9,5,1,1,1,16,20,7,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,2,9,3,14,16,1,8,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,7,46,10,0,0.0,0.26423012666752377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179225794589375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17834084332726985,0.18556200484817134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22116578075716986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467560837752768,0.0,0.0,0.22991329450500034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20042681369363768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255208945061153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330268150225671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18178273830598807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895131557931388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886076221359093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23729813304744404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128880724737645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371983556136999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394290484423832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784747261603824,0.0,0.0,0.18644616475814368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23179255402112084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514090042783188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26307389663457786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361098893804547
mentalhealth,missionalmond6,2020/01/24,"How can I help myself I've felt depressed for a really long time. But until more recently, I was able to handle most of it. But lately I just can't. I have frequent thoughts of killing myself. And before I'd been able to ignore it, but ignoring it feels impossible now. My family and friends can't help. And therapy hasn't really done anything for me. I don't think there's anyone or anything that can help me but me. But I don't know what to do",1.5131182795698948,3.5276065483870984,3.6658064516129047,87.18537634408602,80.29032258064517,7.1440860215053785,22.161290322580648,8.167268648758528,1.2413354838709685,351,11,74,7,9,120,58,93,0.109,0.7509999999999999,0.14,0.6059,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,1,0,12,0,0,1,0,19,17,11,1,0,7,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,2,5,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,5,2,12,1,8,12,2,7,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,7,53,17,0,0.3975874833977736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900120638058233,0.0,0.3271806221872977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16915883233482967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17122075842992798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20343501747087725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874050474837744,0.0,0.10051608888656738,0.0,0.1908731670526314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15358755170736232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3997417640056007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219935821446602,0.0,0.10925184153222522,0.0,0.22424799948225294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17592620572928253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547047226739724,0.0,0.19628483727195625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273379686790575,0.0,0.0,0.12737900274117048,0.0,0.15782002543248808,0.1159182294415438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gtzxvm,2020/01/24,"I realized that I'm still not over it after 18 years So my father was an alcoholic psychopath who made my mother believe she'd have early dementia and he took steps to further discredit her and to make her reliant on him. My father was probably seeing himself in my older brother and gave all his love to him. Neglecting my sister and abusing me. I never told my mother that he was beating me but when I was 5 years old she left him and took me and my brother and my sister with her to our grandpa. After unsuccessfully trying to take legal steps against my mother, my father committed suicide.

When I was like 12 years old my mother married again. I didn't have a really good relationship with my step-father since he was strict and we had not really any shared interests. He could yell quite loudly but was never violent. My teenage years were accompanied by occasional thoughts of suicide, but I thought I was dealing with my history relatively well since I could easily joke about it. 

Now I'm 23 years old living together with my girlfriend (6years together) and I have built up a better relationship to my step-father in the past years since I've been helping him with work besides visiting university. But recently I had a dream in which my stepfather slapped me in the face (he would not really do that). I woke up feeling like a little boy again.
Vulnerable.
Afraid.
Powerless. 
Alone. 
Isolated.
Usually I can easily talk about my emotions with my girlfriend but this day I didn't know how to convey my feelings to her (vulnerable or fragile wouldn't be grave enough) . And I tried dealing with it by myself and tried to not let her notice. Well she noticed I was acting strange and I told her it was something I dreamed and it wasn't anything about her. I kept thinking about the dream that day and eventually I opened up to her.
I've spent the next few hours crying and my girlfriend tried to comfort me, but her touch didn't feel warm because I knew she couldn't understand, yet she was still trying to.
I am fine for now but this showed me one thing: It has been 18 years now but even though everyone (including myself) thought I've been over it, all it took was one bad dream to throw me back.

I just wanted to share this. Thank you for taking the time to read all this.",4.325164334526523,6.1633295216400885,5.026087862024081,81.36823690205013,71.55125284738041,8.297325089489098,28.260397006182885,8.922882184376627,2.314944757565897,1816,69,340,36,35,585,208,439,0.111,0.7490000000000001,0.14,0.8361,2,1,2,0,1,2,41.0,2,1,0,4,22,20,1,1,10,0,37,3,1,3,6,66,66,29,3,6,14,12,6,2,3,2,1,2,0,1,19,24,1,2,11,7,1,8,12,5,2,2,36,9,75,15,44,22,5,57,0,2,1,1,58,14,0,1,37,239,94,3,0.0,0.09741496335021008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786610802663614,0.0,0.08515312030067912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055911103992369496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765846256378945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322061743573527,0.06864865053341349,0.05011936967533056,0.0,0.0,0.09263160510374646,0.0,0.0727151976517686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128887048931487,0.0,0.09031268440959364,0.10604770117511038,0.16952643092142491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248425756210214,0.0,0.08495324004937405,0.0,0.05430425691832766,0.0,0.0,0.07856288506810367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12471577304655633,0.05873660249969461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896061262392432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05510903629590752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096823305768203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045184898671056406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933016885202398,0.0840735425305462,0.0,0.080335187724228,0.08240410120200897,0.07260005823837543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420501422057818,0.07779672162979476,0.05488119722838415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682328156272424,0.0,0.08743984551979986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18721162526919571,0.25882208787104505,0.0,0.11142617815512916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848644679273653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864498062877743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744903319791918,0.08224031498615876,0.0,0.15801299443087596,0.0,0.0811804209284846,0.1765428664259665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551715348229127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20403490047179276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329548371779639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313189068030222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17986643849050146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123635506348337,0.066083766772305,0.0,0.07569534846815637,0.0,0.0,0.05462202947069073,0.05268201662287143,0.08077883201785603,0.19581588074175704,0.04794201523733109,0.0,0.0,0.15712577013620735,0.27404188826284764,0.2791033480679376,0.0,0.0,0.08559190587577556,0.0,0.0,0.09055158358854287,0.0,0.048494345293375256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478478299521589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059855730976479025,0.0,0.0,0.05840535485776476,0.0,0.0,0.3706201703934853
mentalhealth,foot-waffle,2020/01/24,"I’m a Sophmore in engineering and I’m tired of feeling like a fucking idiot Like the title says, I’m a sophmore in engineering. I have made it up to this point with little to no struggles in my courses. A+ student all through highschool top of my class.

But today in calculus 3 I blanked. I couldn’t concentrate and just was staring at the wall for an hour, just day dreaming.

At the end of the class, the professor asked us to solve a problem and he would check it before we left. I hadn’t paid attention all lecture so I panicked, packed up and was trying to leave. The prof stopped me in front of the class and asked if I had a solution. I just said no, I couldn’t solve it, and pretty much darted.

I’m losing my grip and I feel empty most of the time, I don’t know why. I keep rescheduling counseling but I know I need it because this is just one of many stresses in my life.

Right now I’m just in the bathroom crying. I don’t know what to do, but this year is going to be tough and I don’t know if I’m cut out for it.",1.217981651376146,2.954314330275232,3.005036697247707,92.9320504587156,80.00917431192661,5.827889908256882,23.74403669724771,6.742157984588678,0.6084433027522937,796,28,181,8,20,265,115,218,0.152,0.7859999999999999,0.062,-0.948,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,2,0,0,2,7,10,3,2,16,0,15,3,0,1,2,39,36,14,0,7,10,0,3,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,9,11,0,2,7,1,2,2,8,8,0,1,7,6,22,2,28,25,4,28,0,1,1,1,7,18,1,3,10,117,31,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29488898538534203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614307227369126,0.0,0.13420590368635374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17324517448383822,0.10171468500686212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396908166372301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594933277540966,0.11267335275405115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458072086971508,0.0,0.0,0.08963444151561054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15531988397231292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018648508546686,0.0,0.0,0.34670946636019445,0.0,0.0,0.16699996983559215,0.17136043281862245,0.0,0.1114004744376131,0.1541055246609118,0.1580742836319612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764454447772463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14923603147369924,0.0,0.1599007040326582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594044718695196,0.1169454647556711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687340212922508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909393590188086,0.0,0.0,0.16045531143881153,0.0,0.1509142659054599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13468981061439372,0.1500253785425164,0.12542321868213105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185882101695262,0.1806647659542512,0.16488048622835216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196629298747723,0.18127296731657133,0.14949766795976996,0.0,0.0,0.10707977190835632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897146309523154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14231543561818558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120379264471192,0.0,0.0,0.10156484425953946
mentalhealth,SnowRune,2020/01/24,"How to overcome ADHD I have severe ADHD, along with Aspergers and anxiety. Theres so much in my life I want to accomplish, but time keeps ticking by and I feel like I'm accomplishing nothing. More than that, I feel stagnant. I feel doomed to bounce from one thing to the next without ever finishing. I cant focus or commit to anything, and willpower alone doesnt seem to be working. Drugs don't work either, if anything they just space me out and make things worse... I want to know how other people with severe ADHD overcome it and live the lives they want to.",3.8112436289500518,5.707162275229366,4.397553516819574,85.10552497451582,73.03669724770644,6.6793068297655465,25.87257900101937,7.3871296695380915,1.332454841997961,444,15,83,5,9,141,77,109,0.153,0.765,0.08199999999999999,-0.8745,1,1,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,4,6,2,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,3,2,29,16,11,0,4,6,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,9,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,3,11,1,17,15,3,7,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,3,5,58,16,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5285862198468595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184260481656242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11215540673175674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24129326458722214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17001977802406465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326161429979522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22238959387785706,0.10473742700368796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303127260319744,0.0,0.0,0.08057241693973385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355420136520432,0.07162570273057288,0.0,0.2589166882863161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09786257876615816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777441007303044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592022772157116,0.0,0.0,0.14067519300928494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934598448117124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164015104110327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346723574116548,0.0,0.3312526514477528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19480087648956232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548882822011655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25942118206188064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413257472417932,0.0,0.21346604968967864,0.0,0.14940699360659213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saddestmushroom,2020/01/24,"Is it possible to have a panic attack while not having that “feeling of impending doom?” I’ve had a couple of severe panic attacks where I have felt that sense of intense fear and doom. It’s horrifying, but each time I was able to identify the fear: my throat would close up, I would stop breathing, and then I’d die. After reading about panic attacks, I’ve been able to identify when I’m having one and I try to control my breathing as much as possible.

However, recently during my college classes I’ve noticed that sometimes I just randomly get a lot of panic attack symptoms without the feeling of real fear. I have social anxiety and am an art student, so this usually happens before art critiques or when I have to introduce myself to the class etc. Sometimes I have it when I’m just sitting down, even when I don’t have a critique or anything. My brain just goes in a loop. I start shivering and sweating uncontrollably, I get super light-headed, my breath gets really short, I see white spots, and I can feel my chest/stomach tightening. Yet I’ve been able to function and push through those interactions without feeling like I’m dying. Maybe it’s because I’m trying my hardest not to have a full blown panic attack?

It’s not too intense most of the time, but recently it’s been hard to focus during class because I’m just constantly thinking of my breathing. After it passes, it feels disassociating because I don’t even remember anything that was said to me during the “attack.”

I’m seeing my therapist on Monday, but I just wanted to see if anyone else goes through something like this.",7.296275154798764,7.2438866809210545,7.764380804953562,71.24625386996904,63.76973684210528,10.047678018575851,37.29024767801858,9.627879704456738,3.7305544117647065,1277,59,214,22,17,422,154,304,0.253,0.723,0.025,-0.9968,1,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,2,17,20,6,9,12,0,22,8,7,1,0,42,45,22,2,4,16,0,7,2,0,2,1,1,0,0,15,9,0,2,8,3,0,2,7,17,0,1,8,12,26,3,31,35,6,29,2,2,4,0,3,8,0,6,20,146,41,6,0.22234441809378105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669762375276925,0.0,0.0,0.051822795632130984,0.07593937726159232,0.12198034074598048,0.0,0.0,0.5058977485281294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13553909354369248,0.0,0.06306624111920217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273663476888067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009177555257835,0.08312605707393135,0.0,0.08200662318744914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15383893488326086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061913410234926726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265760008904599,0.09790426078052863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25019928578330203,0.1873733641507936,0.05294763223757085,0.07116183654365688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161657815265692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553947820553778,0.0,0.06639230857251352,0.0,0.07606317311013079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241750108683519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300975771723277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445828436540551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448291019185564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438019789621676,0.0,0.0,0.0502221106730382,0.0,0.0,0.4347887797532125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16710661569201976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413486255034518,0.08435887505956084,0.04747984256169652,0.0,0.1463588593580962,0.0,0.08395762741544506,0.0,0.07050015265553465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771797141918898,0.0,0.0,0.0837286348745147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555071125126256,0.0,0.05705719860467691,0.1466028765511992,0.0,0.05245884117573922,0.0,0.0,0.061963296483464776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703366151886963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605300220046906,0.0,0.047489775080128166,0.0,0.0,0.08643387882461953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10063817654317153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162698798250638,0.0,0.04371483284564779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288805644222818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529806349387773,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway30041,2020/01/24,"Not sure what's happening lately I dont know if I'm developing anxiety or panic attacks in my mid 30s, or if the depression is looming, or if I've got sort of sound sensitivity or what the hell is happening these days.

I work a public safety job, which can be high stress. I love it. I love the teamwork, I love my shift, I love the friendships I've built over the years.

Home is a different story. I have a hard time focusing on the family, and always want to try disconnecting. I'm married with four kids, and while there's days where I'm the fun dad most of the time it feels like I have to be the lawbringer. And the noise... the constant fighting between the seven year old, the five year old and the three year old, the neverending defiance, and the baby crying for this that and whatever. Sleep is interrupted at home and at work and I'm unable to get a full eight hours without being woken up.

I'm quick to anger with the kids. No hitting besides a couple quick spanks (I've never let myself get carried away in anger physically), but I yell. A lot.

Lately it's gotten worse. I've been burying in my phone to drown out the noise, but now I've been getting anxious. My hands shake, I have to moderate my breathing very mindfully, and I tell my wife I have to hide away or get away. If I go to lay down for a bit, within fifteen minutes one of the kids is in the room crying about something, or my wife comes to play down with me (which results in all the ducklings following) and the noise continues.

I don't normally cry, but it all feels like a crush. My head hurts. My eyes are wet.

This shit blows. The fuck is going on?",3.071062937062937,4.532229915151518,4.306666666666668,86.79230769230772,74.0909090909091,7.5011655011655005,25.11655011655011,8.139509932561175,1.3756689976689973,1272,41,268,20,26,418,176,330,0.183,0.7340000000000001,0.083,-0.9848,2,0,1,0,2,0,45.0,0,0,0,2,6,21,7,3,31,0,20,11,6,1,4,44,48,24,1,6,15,3,5,2,0,0,0,2,3,3,12,15,0,0,3,1,0,5,6,12,0,6,5,8,25,9,38,38,6,49,1,2,1,5,14,23,3,13,23,169,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903684608542866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266484358502345,0.10730834476016267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806149750681146,0.2677304188181812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10370127190617244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182294447421891,0.0,0.10264727086892517,0.0,0.0,0.10510137907782947,0.31301648701134466,0.12251759574515067,0.0,0.08181221860500912,0.0,0.0,0.09924126438961876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132413099304253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895453498338479,0.0,0.09605662669312166,0.13571755428471602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878140096028472,0.1985072809251639,0.0,0.1079666743274193,0.0,0.0759698319128211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16799349310355705,0.0,0.08508975153362883,0.0,0.09748413091753703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003590477374172,0.19055953892072414,0.0,0.09354312385876104,0.0,0.10168561604389534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426000377752866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05220240597224169,0.0,0.2142990899422541,0.0,0.0,0.09713070799725866,0.0,0.09281176248653854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075460461655262,0.3429181333983967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590985636507256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325987913645643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306715456496023,0.0,0.0,0.2990188337919674,0.0,0.06436569251084025,0.0,0.0,0.11144685290888323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750285568002293,0.0,0.0,0.09505566201937173,0.0,0.0,0.07312568212889102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880736030929017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952418322124085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302288022164041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077544118294877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448998100060903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837427523597469,0.05602583108113579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156413959090644,0.0,0.13830342703417148,0.0,0.09679993267642946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24467421847828455
mentalhealth,YoungRebel21,2020/01/24,"Just some late night thoughts. Is this depression? Or not? All this rage I feel inside is exhausting. I don't know where or how it came to be. I just, I just feel angry. You know? This feeling inside of you that's just aching to burst out of your head. Your brain. It's mind bending. I'm stressed lately, but it's more than work. It's I don't know, more of a way of self harm. I eat a lot, sleep very late, sometimes not at all. Why? Well just for the heck of it. I don't know. To make matters worse, I'm starting to feel the effects it has on my health. I also, just recently, have been more irritable. I feel like punching the world in the face, you know, like real hard. Right in the fucking nose. If the world has a nose. I don't know if this is a cry for help. I'm just writing my ass off. I just felt the need to you, release my anxities. I know I'm young and has a lot to live for, and believe me I want to live longer. I just need some platform to release all this negativity in my head. For some unknown reason, I'm pissed and sad at the same time.  

P.S. I'm a real passionate guy. No history of being violent. I'm just a laid back guy. 25 btw.",-1.0354887585532744,1.0313300161290329,1.234457478005865,99.5974437927664,93.59677419354836,4.457673509286413,17.595796676441836,6.1124844417494595,-0.45685376344086,876,25,216,9,33,292,121,248,0.22699999999999998,0.6920000000000001,0.081,-0.992,0,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,6,0,2,15,13,4,1,15,0,14,14,9,4,3,57,42,10,0,5,17,0,7,2,0,0,2,0,0,3,12,5,1,0,16,0,0,1,8,9,1,0,4,9,25,4,27,36,12,25,0,2,0,3,11,14,4,9,11,132,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743616382846567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407283136985179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318451845748575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205542053958485,0.0,0.12505154850546654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010074236691295,0.0,0.0,0.09417115644253254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187828495593484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27641847922903234,0.0781098426033967,0.10497995126304242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107960616593592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165201650558112,0.0,0.0,0.0979438088828332,0.0,0.22442108281213705,0.11621932654644802,0.0,0.0,0.07328578719071456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4206184255014573,0.0,0.3700081748524191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10683234306387404,0.0,0.19309183305338176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18590754863930856,0.0,0.0,0.07298279939527222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039844954874592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162142895759674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260466891944996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488971904744124,0.0,0.11241588033377922,0.1079563616440769,0.0,0.0,0.0933725645879774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406155958630056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094152165948801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813635217189008,0.0,0.0773887642228884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252443109904589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680077369736452,0.06375484970035589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021386120758723,0.06448935615641042,0.0867860302407647,0.0,0.0,0.09830642423416416,0.0,0.09865896420456548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959809601701666,0.0,0.11142298496645983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shxgun,2020/01/24,"Alternatives if you can't afford a therapist? I have health anxiety. It used to be mild before but now I am worried I will die all the time due to cancer. My grandfather got pancreatic cancer late his life (age 76ish) and it started to worry me. My girlfriend's best friend got caught with lung cancer (family history) and passed away in his early twenties.

Now I get worried I will develop something randomly and every pain I have in my body sends me directly to cancer (even though during my physical my doctor said I am healthy). 

I know I should talk to someone about this health anxiety because it's affecting my relationships with my gf and my parents. However, most of the therapist around my area are $600 dollars per hour through insurance (insurance doesn't pay shit). Even though I have a little money saved up for my HSA, I don't want to use that money on mental health therapy incase I have to use them on other medical needs. Any alternatives?",4.9637380952380985,6.821998183333335,6.009841269841273,74.875,69.94444444444444,9.80952380952381,30.63492063492064,10.125756701596842,3.4399920634920638,763,32,132,21,14,253,118,180,0.235,0.6940000000000001,0.071,-0.9890000000000001,3,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,1,1,8,5,1,0,4,0,14,14,3,4,1,21,26,8,1,4,2,1,0,0,3,3,11,1,0,0,6,7,0,0,1,0,4,3,3,2,0,0,4,1,28,3,20,18,3,21,0,0,0,0,12,9,1,3,9,87,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199624106621307,0.0,0.1844815791488787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10733876170378367,0.0,0.0,0.11328571014761556,0.0,0.0,0.07350239262930516,0.0,0.10260182863559696,0.0,0.1265377309841778,0.0,0.0,0.13393345047278102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12513950216678751,0.0,0.0,0.12341528693967707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15927944981392084,0.0,0.10159100862211316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11366891283167767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315720286864998,0.0,0.06299631095808908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19287228689281427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845019480518441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874368922153805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626576081363003,0.0,0.1360156871336843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516683748044676,0.0,0.12084945680784068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214682663349989,0.12151288002767098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894060410532571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283020323457888,0.0,0.13388607493232976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945417278792604,0.0,0.0,0.11469598398729015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377017481864605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216418471819208,0.0928257782574872,0.0,0.0,0.08534475715084894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691492537090364,0.0,0.0,0.1378898812602569,0.2799975146342722,0.0,0.0,0.2369318475302226,0.0,0.07030920081879899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31241847533124817,0.0,0.0,0.07111921860041341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3673542527513288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amaskoftheheart,2020/01/24,"I'm anxious about everything and I hate it This is probably going to be a mess but I'm extremely anxious and on the verge of tears so I'm sorry.

I don't know if anxiety belongs here or not, but I can't stop thinking about the possibility that I'm going to get hurt. I'm 17, coming up to 18 soon, and as soon as I'm 18 I know I'm going to be terrified and on edge almost all the time. The outside world, in and of itself, is terrifying. From climate crisis to rapists and paedophiles to just walking around in the damn dark, it all terrifies me. I don't know what to do about it. I'm terrified of making friends because I'm scared they'll hurt me. I'm scared of dating because I'm scared they might beat, rape or kill me, or maybe all three. I'm absolutely petrified of doing the things I like doing, like going out to a club on a night, because I don't want to go missing as some have in my area.

I don't know what to do about it. I've tried distracting myself with Youtube and writing, but my thoughts always circle around. I've yet to go into therapy for the 5th time because nowhere wants me (either because I'm nearly 18 or not yet 18, which is stupid but aight). I try reading all the good things about humanity but I can never convince myself of them; the ""kindness"" and ""loving"" nature of humans doesn't seem apparent to me anymore. I'm always terrified someone's being nice because of an ulterior motive or because they feel obligated.

Is there any way I can change this? It's driving me insane and has been for the past year since I found out something happened. It's getting to the point where my school work and what I enjoy doing is taking a backseat and I just sit there, numb. I want to change this so badly but I don't know how to. Suggestions are appreciated.",3.185384615384617,4.538062923076922,4.781098901098903,83.93890109890113,73.61538461538461,7.397802197802199,27.285714285714285,7.957251820313856,1.6543417582417588,1400,52,285,20,28,472,174,364,0.285,0.648,0.067,-0.9984,1,0,1,0,0,1,39.0,0,0,4,3,20,25,6,4,16,0,28,4,0,3,5,61,70,29,1,4,17,0,1,2,1,2,1,0,0,2,17,18,0,1,11,2,0,9,10,16,0,1,3,1,31,9,48,62,6,41,0,3,0,3,10,18,1,10,14,185,48,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584136525118532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15927947582024116,0.0,0.0,0.06508718595685695,0.0,0.07321912987439,0.21625378226836334,0.09492021186449133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040727361517288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991520760465334,0.408414420538133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20250041315281056,0.08244708861380677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860194355292835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839467256893017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494285479952184,0.07394656276299592,0.0,0.10001074567830782,0.0,0.3263707272872153,0.08027836864327888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463747241958518,0.0,0.0,0.0944954128013077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049225446625704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589073035957912,0.09966892719837536,0.2630030255390912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351972915790473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638347688797443,0.0,0.06388825178673417,0.0,0.09615519015307254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015349071723414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738187043476946,0.0,0.0,0.08981887481346683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136757446586964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047842077894394,0.10790047437064032,0.0,0.0,0.10319331807711464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573752425609644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287472095947665,0.09686527261121057,0.0,0.08713226720385282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917364387646968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109614785285127,0.07368348368745621,0.0,0.10714132629363582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800192027879572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196322928682118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945458263029327,0.0,0.12717309928220932,0.061328143564881615,0.0,0.07598433783316615,0.11162043451420664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12996381913230295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16935958573077248,0.07597143159121242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967920170528881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163514739667285
mentalhealth,throwaway9779603,2020/01/24,"I've never been able to feel certain emotions and it's causing me to get hurt For pretty much my entire life I have been unable to hate anything or be angry. I haven't been able to feel any emotions other than sadness and the occasional happiness caused by the people I like. One would think this could be a blessing, but it's actually been a curse. So many people have done horrible, awful things to me, and they just get away with it because I don't hate them. If anything happens I'll feel like I'm the bad guy even if the person did some usually unforgivable things to me. I don't know what this it called, I don't know what's wrong with me and I need someone to teach me other emotions because if I continue like this I'll only get hurt more.",7.767727272727273,5.571925772727276,8.008181818181821,76.83227272727277,64.0,10.618181818181819,34.98701298701299,8.841846274778883,2.776841558441559,595,20,122,7,7,196,86,154,0.214,0.672,0.115,-0.9679,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,0,3,13,2,0,6,1,16,1,0,2,2,26,30,10,0,6,6,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,13,6,0,0,6,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,6,3,16,6,13,20,3,4,1,3,0,0,5,1,0,5,6,81,29,1,0.2505059924289461,0.0,0.12222885634340545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517633253409643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20614508727516956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767931302000365,0.0,0.10458102001793793,0.1527061278721263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789731325948525,0.0,0.0,0.2573386592759688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000432554819497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817730203884847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4226782864466628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272842271051815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899950349524513,0.08948076552235154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963185626858645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12402015850034101,0.11076081089808616,0.13333414354030726,0.0,0.2473228051077835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681718459833564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13767154214127494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846989539744897,0.18357686153152408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698687892635532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207536401209307,0.09287350961807947,0.09660283228288782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487467180794736,0.0952605477372794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17366931350423784,0.10936608506119627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742732641508225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612645723118724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664250502554098,0.08025706247991267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379484797202247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897613482673866,0.1369444888157723,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,huffr,2020/01/24,"Advice for using a tracking device with a loved one who tends to leave the house without telling anyone Earlier this week, my Mother, who is suffering some mental health issues, left the house without telling anyone. After hours of searching and getting the police involved, she was finally found a couple miles away wandering in a grocery store. The police recommended a TILE tracking device, it's a small keychain sized gps thing you can track with your phone. I'm not sure how to best use it though since she didn't take her purse with her when she left. I thought of making a necklace, but I'm worried she'd just take it off. Does anyone have any experience using them with a family member who may have had similar challenges? Any advice on how to ensure it stays on her?",9.163901477832514,8.03392850344828,8.276157635467985,72.62103448275863,60.51724137931035,10.492610837438423,35.886699507389174,9.23628265651192,3.233394088669951,623,22,106,8,7,194,100,145,0.053,0.865,0.083,0.6404,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,1,2,5,5,0,0,12,0,9,2,0,6,1,21,22,6,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,5,0,12,4,18,15,2,15,0,1,0,1,19,9,0,2,5,70,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570102184029575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788557427021179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27585394325872153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235532236753814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380063254164314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550771916521893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508086260613505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286370689579576,0.12397115747193208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14405723813541293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14418838332394987,0.0,0.0,0.06870590552318204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13978360592101352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12950588009124525,0.30347809814580073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137256995378214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13924474777888096,0.28576101265886017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868834616871485,0.0,0.08778057120821367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252605316183047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891111533637128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10878224853157248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140166772911589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394185333196807,0.0,0.1977507036464716,0.0,0.2298822345733876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736604136998133,0.0,0.12920293969812355,0.10440023621460497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3407341465452763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548533374345513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535321463162226,0.0,0.0,0.13354965393589213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gher123,2020/01/24,"Experiencing an emotional high right now Hey Reddit! I've been going through a very rough emotional time lately (combination of SAD and loneliness), and this week has been pretty difficult to get myself out of my slumber; but right now I'm listening to this minimix :  [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JtQoFYlnoE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9JtQoFYlnoE)  and this is the first time in a couple of months that I've felt relief and even hope for my future. I'm in the verge of tears right now and truly feel like I can get through this. 

I love you all!",9.530688405797104,11.34928866304348,7.1921739130434785,70.8086231884058,59.10869565217391,10.046376811594204,28.3768115942029,10.125756701596842,2.678733333333333,455,12,73,9,6,131,61,92,0.061,0.6809999999999999,0.259,0.9727,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,0,1,4,6,0,0,5,0,5,1,0,0,1,11,15,6,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,3,5,6,4,12,12,1,19,0,1,0,1,4,8,0,1,11,45,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21743051109028655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4420863333720504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979057441963426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935950231456103,0.14038415790052314,0.1886768883830691,0.0,0.0,0.16714817972721055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20533288870900346,0.0,0.11167907303264524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076197213922584,0.0,0.1951751197818164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22166769390258448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600306451590243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735463050329436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15684947389865686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19991757790480627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5034459837763929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22916883683157424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16213829799768498,0.0,0.0,0.157625520899865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Undulatingrhythm,2020/01/24,"My brother(27m) needs serious help and we don’t know what to do For the past 5 years my brother has been on a down spiral. It started with him discovering he has a debilitating back disease that’s left him in severe chronic pain, he also had braces at one point and stopped going to appointments so now he has mouthful of rotting teeth. At this point, he sleeps all day in a room that is literally covered in trash and beer cans, you literally cannot see the floor. It’s honestly horrifying.

    Last month my dad passed away and him and my brother were going through a difficult time because my dad obviously wanted him to get help, but he refused. My dad said some pretty bad things and that just made it worse. My dads death was pretty sudden and they never got a chance to make things right. Now he’s even worse. He lives with my mom who doesn’t work and is also severely depressed with PTSD. He’s closed him self off, sleeps all day and only wakes up to go to work and immediately goes to his room when he gets home to drink. I love my brother and he’s probably the smartest person I know with a ton of potential, but he refuses to get help and I’m worried he’s going to either kill himself or drink himself to death within the next few years. He showed a little bit of ambition when I was home for my dads funeral, but it looks like that’s gone. None of us know what to do at this point. Mom also needs serious help and this is just putting more on her. It’s honesty just a super fucked up situation. I feel so utterly powerless and probably need a lot of help myself.",4.635708257986735,5.380214240506335,5.476672694394214,82.59900843881856,69.56962025316456,8.803857745629898,28.65521398432791,8.976282227363876,2.093556841470765,1244,43,257,22,21,407,170,316,0.19399999999999998,0.6759999999999999,0.13,-0.9716,2,0,3,0,0,0,25.0,2,1,1,3,14,12,2,0,13,0,17,12,5,2,4,47,43,25,4,4,8,10,1,1,0,0,2,1,4,2,17,20,3,3,4,4,0,7,5,8,0,1,9,4,28,4,38,34,10,49,0,1,2,2,48,24,1,3,19,156,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.222901904029747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729263929466104,0.07144257543242773,0.07757653425408566,0.05663748621713995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10143439542128352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983940046678322,0.0,0.08002382979238118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18203418361778695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061366625770987886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04697842984819155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589442356736815,0.14562598165805424,0.0,0.21121311503213175,0.0,0.07430915579613899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31138034096083644,0.0,0.1863939686262584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279189802732504,0.0,0.15318383445060416,0.07573460222230942,0.0,0.0,0.10094772220612376,0.0,0.0,0.045391463589394235,0.09312090667337003,0.08204182982499622,0.0,0.07802156836779503,0.0,0.0,0.0789893349059034,0.08385551329527871,0.0879143288830101,0.06201859823334351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21763172351347096,0.07416041580950987,0.0,0.0,0.2066762687612432,0.07165844171676405,0.0,0.09881155883518897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295867915310215,0.07066275642880969,0.0988635108147275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886937540765587,0.0,0.08112601925789123,0.0,0.0,0.2634918629081287,0.0,0.0,0.18904712061233725,0.20034684797930494,0.0,0.10860760920858922,0.09340089229433453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934521033970937,0.08837932997641604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403778023102285,0.0,0.09692609897763924,0.20992523764325946,0.0,0.0,0.1044354935382539,0.18595555157758736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0657626552541526,0.0,0.0,0.07767748607716972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345145046072666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05417696281529191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176010441151484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05480112441467275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352801585557773,0.09435530229127914,0.1893678344994366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196628593378063
mentalhealth,MadiCat247,2020/01/24,"Fellow redditors with Depersonalization Disorder give me some coping tips that you find helpful and to avoid panic attacks and making it worse. I use distraction, if i have an episode i keep thinking ""im just in a movie, i will get control back soon""",10.650652173913043,8.605184934782612,10.053913043478264,63.946521739130446,58.34782608695652,12.678260869565218,42.56521739130434,11.20814326018867,4.773860869565217,201,9,34,4,2,65,41,46,0.319,0.627,0.053,-0.9186,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,1,3,4,1,3,2,0,2,0,0,3,0,13,8,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,0,3,7,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,2,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3166379356239329,0.0,0.214016818576155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3121681784711481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189876535353209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543864724016421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541473394467366,0.2669972881158583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865571881647158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30064167364852656,0.0,0.0,0.24739044516275144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18578589876014334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265575829599119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17834114962993047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403857663978579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836397010810285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lollyrocks,2020/01/24,"ECT therapy. My friend has been sectioned for 3 months now. She has psychosis(this time drug induced) .... I have been with her through many of her episodes, and usually once she’s been sectioned she slowly begins to get better. Not this time. Usually it begins with the ups, and ends with the down. Medication gets altered slightly then she slowly comes back round. This time she has just completely shut down.  She is barely verbal, not eating, doesn’t want to know her kids and having to be restrained to be given her meds. She has now been moved to a different hospital so she can undergo ECT therapy. From what I’m reading. There’s many many mixed reviews. Just wondering if anyone out there has had this treatment and if it has helped or not.",4.082909698996655,6.635697101449281,3.941304347826087,85.71255852842812,74.36231884057972,7.144704570791527,26.557413600891863,8.139509932561175,1.83431259754738,592,22,107,10,13,180,87,138,0.009000000000000001,0.946,0.045,0.7076,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,8,2,0,0,3,0,18,3,0,1,0,22,28,9,0,3,8,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,6,9,1,1,3,1,0,2,4,0,0,0,6,1,14,2,16,20,2,22,0,0,1,0,15,7,0,4,13,78,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989954750661744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085691972971632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900741818384685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13539127717675387,0.16479369706806427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16421312653420805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18227166230451167,0.16082799501464656,0.0,0.0,0.13920929977049734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143205713678075,0.0,0.16423360504834225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535025828823677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637858808061033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4780485699142936,0.0,0.0,0.17458461513994394,0.15833602774328387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254545957555739,0.167050833035195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673849248683836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572162935126699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3594837849175985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749478503484457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34620938273131385,0.0,0.092705155915699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704482382024608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moodkill,2020/01/24,"Looking for mental health facility recommendations for my brother (schizophrenia, bipolar) in SE USA Hey all,

My brother (age 29) suffers from a number of mental health conditions and we want to get him the best help. Does anyone have recos for mental health facilities particularly located in the southeast US (Georgia, Florida)? He's currently in jail right now for arson (set fire to his belongings that he believed were possessed) and they just set his bail. Thanks in advance.",9.173333333333332,10.465442135802476,8.646518518518523,61.92533333333333,59.74074074074074,10.924444444444443,40.89135802469136,10.793553405168565,5.006109135802468,387,20,54,9,5,123,63,81,0.061,0.8009999999999999,0.138,0.7096,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,2,0,1,2,2,3,0,0,3,0,2,4,0,0,1,6,6,2,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,8,2,12,5,2,11,0,1,1,0,12,5,0,0,3,32,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277368903606998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21393808077421494,0.19927511696288885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16617174819218303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920833206637322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6055242975715327,0.0,0.0,0.12727752525996303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15945759626493164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5740855282849836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16216280678007886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17482281081792267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284111686113441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11200051158400126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KorolDurakov,2020/01/24,"Help me to be strong My newborn brother was diagnosed with heart disease (I don’t know what the name on English) and it’s pretty heavy. Only close circle knows about it (my mom, dad and me). I want to be strong to support my parents and myself. I have exams in my university next week and I really don’t know how to prepare to them right now. Can you please advice me what to do, I really need it..",0.816775067750676,3.0371056097561,2.9291869918699187,90.2896612466125,84.3658536585366,5.595663956639567,20.08672086720868,6.937597516519254,0.4237436314363148,308,9,65,4,9,104,55,82,0.0,0.7829999999999999,0.217,0.9501,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,1,2,3,3,0,0,1,0,8,2,1,1,0,13,14,5,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,15,3,10,11,0,7,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,3,45,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283628486951905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23719425870712746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769282442438631,0.15664000888402238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3852959553449966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27369932057530577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17328097033454826,0.0,0.0,0.24853597703097785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17773464375791154,0.0,0.0,0.2594892772932255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565255840221469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23775057989242024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994204279983202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995732038536097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26519292233386554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378386411402961,0.0,0.1874550471876578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mikeoldmac,2020/01/24,"My journey please read hello all i have recently started a youtube channel regarding my journey with mental health

[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUFnPiR1uXinM7j3eAw0FSw?view\_as=subscriber](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCUFnPiR1uXinM7j3eAw0FSw?view_as=subscriber)

please subscribe and leave your feedback!

​

i recently have tried to commit suicide 3 times and have had to be talked down from a bridge due to my depression. things havent been good and iv found the chance to talk and vent about mental health really helped me.

​

if anyone has suggestions on things i can talk bout more please leave comments here thank yu so much good luck to you all

​

remember its ok to not be ok",12.810218446601946,16.60940151456311,7.188531553398062,66.4561953883495,53.271844660194176,8.256796116504855,31.32160194174757,8.841846274778883,2.6650786407766995,608,19,79,8,8,155,72,103,0.13,0.685,0.185,0.6709,0,0,0,0,0,2,38.0,0,2,0,0,3,7,0,0,3,2,10,3,0,0,3,13,13,6,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,2,0,2,2,1,0,0,3,0,9,6,11,8,4,9,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,2,5,48,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3529608858905729,0.3958341257304644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592633543427743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352555331259443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905969617819773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18215472027341284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230845138394508,0.0,0.0,0.07278336654114788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299552430339184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21885967872589893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07982370816169611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3575867189120877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086160708373984,0.0,0.06956341140482415,0.0,0.2144325043419911,0.0,0.1230075472319524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685821505802998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877620986521566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26183359441719656,0.0,0.09997203114631267,0.0,0.0,0.1442803380135282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331776968488002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372323179891585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3958341257304644,0.0
mentalhealth,nathanre8,2020/01/24,"Feeling like I'm experiencing symptoms of psychosis. I'm not asking for a diagnosis, just an opinion. This has started about a month ago, but has gotten really noticable within the last week. 

-voices in head that aren't mine and don't say what I'm thinking 
-screaming child like sound almost constantly
-life feels fake and I sometimes think I'm in a movie where everything is scripted
-feel my self shaking when I'm not
-no visual hallucinations, but colors sometimes become very vivid
-beeping sounds
-very strong deja Vu in situations I know didn't happen
-feel like I know a lot more than others do. I feel like I have the answers to everything. 
-very strong taste pallette for some reason? Nice, but wasn't too strong before. 
-Talking too much and getting too deep into topics. 
-Sometimes stuttering or slowed speech to the point where my friends can't understand me. 

I'm going to a therapist soon, but I wanted to see what you guys thought, especially if you've experienced the same stuff.",4.321561596298442,7.278981659340662,4.549086176980913,79.50907171775596,75.81318681318682,6.908502024291497,27.710815500289183,8.032893268588372,2.1591824175824184,810,33,134,14,19,253,125,182,0.065,0.742,0.19399999999999998,0.9777,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,3,9,13,0,1,10,0,10,4,1,1,0,32,35,10,0,2,9,0,5,4,1,0,2,6,0,3,6,4,1,0,13,0,0,2,8,4,0,0,4,17,11,9,14,31,5,20,0,0,3,0,8,9,0,6,13,76,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112142454802394,0.0,0.12563179038066266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117289772774246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13856261349476934,0.10675868362981053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557954899208485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255138095070952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171860784634141,0.26888963502585994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969314141974446,0.0,0.06554857082816619,0.0,0.07130278714462274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242268285641641,0.11094538527804344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875992115330773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13790096118689635,0.10226804752950096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886173236796678,0.24517703768575905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066630683920197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014234849417863,0.0,0.09222880053069632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14283900058029922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860187888061305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037399091625927,0.12899554450749914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977219597143318,0.0,0.0,0.09997674782022643,0.0,0.13088393688261002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102423071538714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722545494831523,0.0,0.08880245166477856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14362365375651953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040276625008645,0.0,0.10084137869926182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567072770281328,0.0,0.16078160941437766,0.0,0.099602592031646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061007590184615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105571769943221,0.07400057347444464,0.0,0.10063782461731224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sarsar223,2020/01/24,"What are some short-term and long-term goals of yours? Examples: learning a language/instrument, moving somewhere, finding love, etc.",7.818571428571428,11.340600619047626,5.362142857142857,75.32035714285716,66.6190476190476,8.009523809523811,39.07142857142857,8.841846274778883,4.2491714285714295,107,6,14,2,2,30,20,21,0.0,0.792,0.20800000000000002,0.6369,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,8,2,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5086989146554993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4168891412283369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4036554530481163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41166978602226056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4847877067904288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,druggiedevil,2020/01/24,"Getting help but not wanting to get committed I've recently been looking into getting professional help. I found a few clinics with free consultations or at least cheaper prices that could be sustained by a student like myself. I really want to get help but I am absolutely terrified of getting committed. It's less of a fear of the place itself and more of the consequences the rest of my life would face. While I know that my mental health is important, the other aspects of my life simply won't allow that type of event. My third term of this academic year is just beginning and I'm scared of what might happen to me if I don't seek help, but I'm even more terrified of stopping my studies because of it. I'm aware that clinics conduct safety checks with their patients (but when, I'm not exactly sure). If anyone could give me advice as to how to pass a safety check or at the very least not get committed, it would be much appreciated. I live in the Philippines if that somehow affects it.",6.0968750000000025,6.726873270833334,6.629166666666666,76.0325,66.29166666666666,9.733333333333334,33.70833333333333,9.725611199111238,3.2399395833333333,796,34,145,16,12,260,114,192,0.10800000000000001,0.6940000000000001,0.19899999999999998,0.953,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,2,10,0,13,6,1,3,5,37,31,15,0,9,13,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,0,13,5,0,1,2,0,4,1,5,2,0,1,2,1,15,4,24,21,9,14,0,0,1,0,7,5,0,7,9,104,28,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834551663043666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10614803821560764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254105717821973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424134810457478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026808750895468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082677629209933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16645019290838156,0.0,0.0,0.4758820772371807,0.14562855340093578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13424376188765516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16136534465961525,0.0,0.0,0.40701617054903855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342998562426986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21445367681334146,0.07416596865413158,0.0,0.13404969344390044,0.0,0.12748091240803486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15298726988715108,0.16104483643080628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159672037370554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586075796154479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972524172274716,0.0,0.14989258690922053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15198679928447953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691870986238002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430777218035548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12525791741719502,0.1790811819735828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156808163557964,0.0,0.0,0.0977597016367757
mentalhealth,BurnerBlock,2020/01/24,"What is going on with me? I'm 19, male, I've been dealing with a few symptoms and I'm not sure what is going on with me.

Ever since I was a kid I've never been able to listen to other people talk. Every time someone would start telling me something I'll lose concentration and begin zoning out. I've never been able to listen to teachers so I've always just done some homework and last-minute studying to scrape by. I'm constantly forgetting what I'm doing, for example, I'll be doing some homework and then randomly I'll either get distracted or I'll end up zoning out like my brain just stops working, and once I zone back in I completely forget what I was doing. Now I'm in university and the loss of concentration and memory loss is really starting to affect me and my grades. I spend all my lectures zoned out, I try to listen to what the proffers are saying but for some reason I just can't, I've never been able to listen and focus on things, I feel like my mind is always drifting from one topic to another. Am I just dumb, or is there something actually wrong with me?",3.8236130136986297,5.019999543378997,5.427577054794521,80.52848886986304,71.8310502283105,7.849429223744293,25.55964611872146,8.278499904357787,1.6532303652968037,856,26,164,13,16,291,116,219,0.098,0.878,0.024,-0.904,0,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,4,9,9,1,1,4,0,20,3,1,2,6,43,36,14,0,1,9,0,1,2,0,1,2,5,2,2,7,16,0,1,2,0,1,3,5,6,0,1,7,6,18,3,28,27,6,26,0,3,0,0,10,9,1,6,16,110,25,5,0.4183487293986669,0.0,0.1360826707877914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23206643738510896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462250397573924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722811659387213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556718460801824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14621022778561524,0.15069545179034802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376639012632053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427053325837733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351093392190678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12614012555261914,0.11749228258370807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050989585227704,0.09962280529081208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285664813458557,0.0,0.15850481584500975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367001690700895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625603838242456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600840624548049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080431962519388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226563304933445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850924779469138,0.0944946419969174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667677798252597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933496949474377,0.14337738990144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089590030210253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535413068502053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815517360885015,0.214710193707189,0.0,0.0,0.19740625593164646,0.0,0.0,0.11658609006445493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142957550146553,0.14494150423759827,0.0,0.1120842873074759,0.12188507632036427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264410222868977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131416946124204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467710870995803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152095250384974,0.0,0.0,0.0990609781177952,0.15246622070455598,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZestZoro,2020/01/24,"I had a friend A friend of mine killed himself recently but I think I knew he was suicidal or at least had some problem (I saw evidence of self-harming) however     
I didn't do anything because I was scared but I don't know why and now it's too late. Am I a bad person?",-0.4773152709359607,1.61330284482759,2.289704433497537,93.40431034482759,89.51724137931032,6.072906403940888,23.802955665024644,7.447530270364453,1.1512334975369465,207,9,48,4,7,72,42,58,0.33899999999999997,0.593,0.067,-0.9636,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,1,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,9,12,4,2,1,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,7,1,10,2,3,5,2,4,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,2,3,33,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21917561548187012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223832712496978,0.16235875424744062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.411548165056599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946664060347346,0.0,0.146373825260626,0.0,0.3004437914355739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23255833377327856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548519787346374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629792053773407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26665339846249003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778513266591849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29133338141935755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706602985141383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403309597947314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shhhdontlookatme,2020/01/24,"If They Wrote A Book About You.... What would your character look like? What would you want others to know about you? What misunderstanding or stigma would you like to see broken? 

I myself suffer from a mental illness and am trying to rewrite a fictionalization of my life; but, I know mental illness is different for everyone and I want to get a well rounded character that speaks to anyone with mental illness. 

I want to be able to see a strong, positive role model for the mental health community. I want to show that we are humans, with goals and dreams, failings and fears; that we can accomplish things and be the hero, too.

It would mean so much to me to gain your perspective.",5.652327209098862,7.1034008818897645,5.801522309711287,78.60198600174981,67.74015748031496,8.794050743657044,26.70953630796151,9.150863307647796,2.1187084864391945,540,16,98,10,9,171,77,127,0.147,0.61,0.243,0.9342,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,2,6,1,6,5,8,0,1,7,0,10,5,0,0,0,24,22,9,0,9,3,0,1,2,0,4,5,1,0,1,9,9,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,5,17,5,18,15,1,0,0,2,4,0,13,0,0,2,2,73,26,4,0.148417855009938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377721510996273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15506506935521186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418196207694422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16701134950603375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754220352163056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577612395437741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631331433024617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483192023094877,0.1450189341648495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463361821639125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16167055429095228,0.0,0.0,0.5982811583918792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10910420060957417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23653962943690984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860222799195167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076598114787633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35016278503555565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344547592176573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.421727143531076,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jonathan_Thiel,2020/01/24,"a practical guide to inner freedom # introduction

What I learned about meditation, mental health and the spiritual path helped me so much that I want to write about it. These are my first attempts to do that. In the future my writing will look probably more like a blog with short posts about one aspect at a time.

# the problem and the task

Maybe you are familiar with one or some of these problems:

* We often create the same situations like we did in our past, although we wanted to change something in our life.
* We know some things intellectually, but still do or feel the opposite. For example we know that we should be grateful for what we have, but we just don’t feel gratitude.
* We feel confused and don’t know what we want in life.
* We don’t know how to handle emotions like fear, anger, frustration.
* We achieve various things, but somehow it doesn’t really make us happy - we feel like “there must be more to life than this.“

In this article, I summarize what I’ve learned about meditation, mental health, the spiritual path - basically “how to handle life“. All of this has already been said by wise people, but since many people are still not familiar with it, we need to continue to talk about it and share these insights in new and different forms and especially do the practice ourselves.

What we want to achieve here is to get from this dependent state as pictured above to something I call inner freedom, which roughly looks like this: We feel much more alive, we see more clearly what is really important to us, and we have the strength to take action and create the life we want to live. We still experience challenges and things that go wrong, but we can handle them well and they don’t feel as threatening anymore. At the same time we notice positive feelings like gratitude, empathy, and joy naturally arising within us. This is what I call inner freedom.

I will not try to convince you to believe me. You need to try these things out and see for yourself whether it works. I know that it works, because I already feel the enormous positive effects of being on this path.

# your most powerful tool

Your most powerful tool to gain this inner freedom is your ability to direct your attention at something. We need to notice something, before we can change it.

Take a look at your breath. Normally it happens without your attention, but you can focus on it and feel the air streaming through your nose or mouth and your belly/chest slightly moving up and down. This gives you a glimpse of what it means to direct your attention at something that happened automatically and unnoticed until you focused on it.

Another example: Focus your attention on your back/spine. Can you feel whether your back is in a good/healthy position? Now, in case you sat in a bad position, slouched or hunched over, you probably immediately straitened your back a little or adjusted your sitting position to a slightly healthier one. But before I directed your attention to your back, you were already in this bad position, but you didn’t do anything about it. As long as your attention isn’t there, you can’t change anything because you don’t even know that you are in a bad sitting position. But once you shifted your attention to your back, you saw clearly that you should change your position to a better one and then the action itself basically happened automatically. To sit up in your chair is effortless, you don’t think about it, you just know it’s the right thing to do and do it. But the key was your clear view of the situation, which required your attention. If you sit long enough in a bad position, your back will begin to hurt, which means your body is telling you that you should pay attention to it.

# the aspired state

If we want to find inner freedom and improve the ability to change our life in positive ways, what we need more than anything else is this clear view of all the things happening right now. And we get this clear view by strengthening our ability to pay attention.

As a result of this clear view, you will see more clearly what you need to change in your life. The „action“ itself, for example to drop a bad habit, then happens quite effortlessly, like adjusting your sitting position. Some things may still require some willpower and dedication, but other things just change on their own.

Our ability to “see clearly“ needs to get stronger before it can influence something like a bad habit or a strong emotion - it doesn’t work immediately like noticing your bad sitting position and immediately straighten your back. That’s why we need to practice it and build inner strength this way.

The problem is that our attention gets constantly pulled away by our mind. What we need to do is to direct our attention away from our mind and into our body over and over again. The more you are able to do that, the more alive you will feel and many positive effects will come from that.

To accomplish this redirection of our attention, we need to practice these elements - I will talk about all of them in detail:

1. hold your attention in your body
2. drop your thoughts
3. stay with your emotions
4. notice your automatic reactions

We want to do them all at the same time, but for now let’s look at each of these elements in detail. If during the following practices you don’t feel anything and don’t understand what I’m talking about at all, then do the exercise explained in the chapter “one amazing accelerator“, maybe you need this first, before you can feel the things I’m describing.

In the beginning, practice in a quiet room. Later you expand it to more and more difficult situations - while doing something and in situations with other people.

# hold your attention in your body

I said the key to inner freedom is strengthening your “ability to pay attention and see clearly“ - we can also call it meditation or “holding your attention in your body“. Why your body? Because you experience the reality around you only through your body. Your body is your “anchor“ in reality and in the present moment. But normally we filter everything through our mind and therefore we can’t see clearly. We want to experience reality fresh and direct again, without our mind as the filter. Also, our mind cuts everything into pieces (good/bad, right/wrong, should happen/shouldn’t happen), but to gain inner freedom we need to see our life as a whole.

How do we hold our attention in our body? It feels to me like a background and a foreground. The background feels like an alertness or aliveness or subtle peace.

Try this exercise to feel the “background“: Feel your hands “from the inside“ without moving them or looking at them. Can you feel how your attention is resting there, even while you are reading this? If it’s too hard, don’t do it while reading and close your eyes instead. Can you feel the aliveness in your hands? Now move your attention to other body parts and try to let this feeling grow. Go to your elbows, shoulders, chest, nose, feet, only the left foot, then the right foot, and so on. Doing this for a while should make the feeling more clear and stronger. Then try to feel your body as a whole. It can feel like your attention is at all body parts at once or at the core of your body. This practice is often called „body scan meditation“. You can also focus on your breath, then your attention is in your body too. But I suggest that you expand this feeling from your breath to your whole body if possible.

In the foreground you notice the things that are happening right now - your breath, something hurts, you are hungry, a temperature change, a smell, a noise, you see something. You notice these things, but try not to lose this general feeling of your body, which I call the background - because we want to experience reality as a whole, not concentrate only on parts of it. You can also notice thoughts and emotions arising, but I will talk about them in the following chapters.

You will notice that you lose this connection to your body all the time - but this is a sign that you make progress. Just redirect your attention back into your body again and again and again. It will become easier and more natural over time.

Even when we are doing something or talking to somebody, we want to hold part of our attention in our body and feel this background. The more you practice it, the easier it will get. Start practicing with a task like vacuuming your floor or washing dishes.

Some activities make it very hard to hold your attention in your body. Watching a movie/television/Youtube and reading can absorb your entire attention quite easily, they “suck you in“ so that you are like in a dream, you are not here anymore. If we want to gain inner freedom, we have to avoid that.

Also practice it with pleasant things like a walk in nature. Look at the trees and animals, but hold your attention in your body at the same time. It feels a bit like “looking with your entire body“.

Over time the “background feeling“ will get stronger - it is pure presence or awareness or aliveness or consciousness or however you want to call it - and it feels great.

# drop your thoughts

The more you practice, the more you will notice thoughts flying through your head. Do you notice them? They don’t stop, even if we would like them to stop. Oftentimes they are negative or pointless, like chatter. Only a small amount of them is actually helpful. Most of them are just repeating old stuff from our past.

Do you know these situations where you are annoyed at your own thoughts? For example you lay in bed and want to sleep, but you keep wandering from one thought to the next and the next and you know that this is pretty pointless and you would rather sleep than thinking all these thoughts, but they keep coming up and don’t stop?

If you say “What the hell are you talking about? I don’t have this problem.“, then it will be harder for you to understand what I’m saying. Continue practicing with the other elements until you begin to notice what I’m describing.

It is not a problem that these thoughts are coming up, but it is VERY important that we notice and drop them. We want to avoid that a thought creates a spiral of more thoughts, which then gets out of control and pulls our attention away from our body and completely into our mind. When you notice that you are trapped in a spiral of thoughts, gently direct your attention back into your body like described in the previous chapter. You need your body as the “anchor“ to gain back your attention and stop this series of thoughts. New thoughts will still come up, but as long as you have your attention anchored in your body, they can’t carry you away. If you have trouble to come back and stay in your body, “hold on“ to something like your breath. Breathe a little bit deeper for a minute and really “grab“ your breath with your attention, focus on it, don’t let your attention slip away. It’s YOUR attention, don’t let these thoughts steal it from you!

If your mind is extremely active and overwhelming you with thoughts, try some more formal meditations like counting or guided meditations to calm it down. But once your mind has calmed down, you need to drop these techniques again, because they are only helpful in the beginning and can not replace the practice of “holding your attention in your body“ like I described.

Exhausting yourself physically can also help to calm your mind. Go running or hiking or swimming and when you feel that your body needs rest, try again to hold your attention in your body.

These “trains of thought“ are only helpful when you have a complex task to do, like planning a dinner with friends. You think about all the things you need to buy and do and you try not to forget something. But even in those situations you should keep part of your attention in your body and let pauses happen between your thoughts, because then they have a higher quality and you have better ideas.

But while your thinking mind is not needed, which is most of the time, only notice these single thoughts popping up in your head and then drop them. Don’t react by thinking about them, so to say.

An important category of thoughts are judgements and expectations. These are automatic thoughts that come up depending on the situation. For example you wake up, open the window and see that it’s raining outside. Maybe you think something like: “Oh no it is raining - I wanted to go to the beach and enjoy the sun - why is it raining all the time - I want sunshine - I need sunshine - this is unfair.“ All of these thoughts have nothing to do with reality and they don’t allow you to see clearly because they pull your attention away into your mind. And because of these negative thoughts, emotions like frustration follow. If you would see clearly and experience life through your body (like we aspire), you would notice the rain, notice the fresh air, listen to the sound of it and still feel the “background feeling“ in your body. What emotions follow that? The joy to be alive, gratitude for the water that nature generously supplies.

Many people identify very strongly with their judgements and expectations. They can’t believe that we should get rid of them all. But it is the only way to see clearly and gain inner freedom. If you carry around the judgement that rain is bad, then you don’t have inner freedom - your inner peace is dependent on the sunshine, how could that be freedom? We need to trust in life and our intuition, then we don’t need our judgements and expectations.

# stay with your emotions

While you are practicing to hold your attention in your body, you will also notice emotions arising. Like thoughts, emotions arise sometimes seemingly “out of nowhere“, at other times following a situation like somebody criticizing you.

Let’s look at the negative emotions first. This includes everything from the slightest negative feeling like restlessness or boredom to huge emotional pain like sadness, anger or hopelessness. For now, we will focus on the emotions themselves and not on what caused them. What caused them is not really important here - we want to handle the emotions first, before we take action to improve a situation.

How should we handle our arising emotions? We don’t look away - we need to look our emotions straight in the eye and give them attention and space, even if it is unpleasant at first. You feel your emotions in your body, right? So you are still connected to your body while feeling an emotion. The emotion itself is part of reality in this moment. But you have to notice and stop the following dynamics from happening:

* the emotion causes series of thoughts, like “I hate this, it is all his/her fault, what is my life, why is this happening to me..“
* having an emotion to your emotion, like getting frustrated at your frustration.
* running away from the emotion by distracting yourself by doing something that pulls your attention away from your body, like watching a movie. If you try to avoid the emotion, it will grow in the dark.

All of these dynamics want to pull your attention away again. How do you stop all of this? By paying attention to the emotion itself, while still being open to reality as a whole, like I described with the background and foreground. Every time you got pulled away into thoughts about the emotion, emotions about the emotion or distractions, just direct your attention back into your body - feel the background and the pure emotion (which is part of the foreground).

In the beginning you will not see all of this clearly, especially with strong emotions. But keep practicing and you will notice more and more. Begin with little emotions like some discontent or boredom. You may not be strong enough to look this closely into heavy strong negative emotions. It’s okay to leave them out and look at them later, when you got more experience with the practice and your inner strength has already improved.

This is not an exercise in concentration. We want to look at our emotions, but not cling to them or noticing nothing else anymore. Only notice that it is there, acknowledge it, and then continue with your life. If it doesn’t go away, you notice this - but you don’t stop everything you do and completely focus on the emotion.

Try to not separate the emotions in negative/positive/neutral. They are all part of reality in this moment. We acknowledge them while we feel them and don’t analyze or fight them. We enjoy positive emotions, but we don’t try to make them longer or save them for later, because then they are just thoughts in our mind again and not reality.

# notice your automatic reactions

The more you practice, the more you notice your automatic reactions. In the previous chapters we already talked about automatic thoughts and emotions that come up, depending on the situation.

Automatic reactions are not only thoughts and emotions, but also actions - the urge to smoke a cigarette, eat candy, scroll endlessly through social media, say something mean. When you notice the urge to do or say something, try to sit with the urge without acting it out. It’s like not scratching an itch. Create a gap between the urge and your reply. We need the clarity that arises in the gap. Then you have the choice to react more intelligently.

Oftentimes we think we have “the right“ to say something mean, because somebody did something to us. But there is an important difference between reacting out of this urge or to reply from a state of clarity. You can reply calmly and firmly and say that you think it was not okay what somebody did or said, even while you still feel the urge to say something mean. But to react with a mean comment and aggression is NEVER necessary and it will always lead to more pain, more suffering, less freedom.

When you feel the urge to react with an automatic action: first make a pause, feel your body, see the situation clearly, then reply with an action/words you choose. Thoughts and emotions you have to approach slightly differently. Like we discussed in the previous chapters, they just “appear“ within you and you can do nothing to prevent this. These thoughts and emotions are part of reality. But you can pay attention to the urges that follow. The urge to think about and analyze your thoughts and emotions. And while you notice these urges, you can do the same like when you have the urge to say/do something: make a pause and hold your attention in your body instead of these “trains of thought“.

The key is this clarity that arises in the gap/pause, because then you can consciously choose your reply. When we think and act automatically, then we think and act like we learned in the past and like we always reacted in these situations and then nothing will change.

These urges include things like the urge to go into nature, go jogging, party all night, give somebody a hug, judge somebody based on their clothes. Don’t divide the urges to react in positive and negative or good and bad - only notice them. When the clarity is there, you just “know“ what the right reply to a situation or urge is.

In the beginning, practice it with very small things like you are bored and turn on the TV (or Youtube). Can you pay more attention to the boredom as well as the entire reality around you, don’t act, feel the boredom and the urge to turn on the TV? Then either turn it on or decide to do something else. Creating this “gap“ needs to become a habit, before you are able to do it in more difficult situations like an argument with somebody.

# an amazing accelerator (""The Wim Hof Method"")

There are a lot of helpful things which can support our practice - they make it easier for us to hold our attention in our body and calm our mind. Things like Yoga, Tai Chi, Qi Gong, and many more.

The tool I’m most excited about at the moment is called the “Wim Hof Method“. Especially the basic breathing exercise is amazing, because it is simple and effective. Besides its enormous health benefits, it is a great starting point to meditate and do the practice like described in this article.

You can learn this basic breathing exercise here:

[https://youtu.be/nzCaZQqAs9I](https://youtu.be/nzCaZQqAs9I)

[https://youtu.be/tybOi4hjZFQ](https://youtu.be/tybOi4hjZFQ)

I copied the safety guidelines from the official website:([https://www.wimhofmethod.com/](https://www.wimhofmethod.com/))

„Warning - important message, please read carefully: The breathing exercise has a profound effect and should be practiced in the way it is explained. Always do the breathing exercise in a safe environment (e.g. sitting on a couch/floor) and unforced. Never practice the exercises before or during diving, driving, swimming, taking a bath or in any other environment/place where, should you pass out, a serious injury could occur. Wim Hof breathing may cause tingling sensations and/or lightheadedness. If you’ve fainted, it means that you went to far. Take a step back next time.

Do not practice the method during pregnancy or when having epilepsy. Persons with cardiovascular health issues, or any other (serious) health conditions, should always consult a medical doctor before starting with the Wim Hof Method.“

—

I could talk a lot more about the Wim Hof Method, but for now I leave it at that.

# final words

Notice that I called this article “guide to inner freedom“. Don’t expect a life without challenges and things that go wrong. They are part of life. The goal is not to eliminate those things from your life. Maybe you already noticed that this is not possible. But here are some things that might change if you do this practice regularly:

* You feel more and more alive, because you experience life more directly and less through your mind.
* It will become your habit to return your attention to your body and you will like it more and more and it feels like home to you. You can always come back home and enjoy the peace and stability of it. Your life circumstances are always in motion. Life is uncertain. But as long as you hold your attention in your body, you are free.
* Some negative emotions disappear, others get weaker, some are still there, but they seem less important now - they are annoying and unpleasant but not that big of a deal.
* Emotions like gratitude, empathy, joy will naturally grow within you.
* Your intuition will get much stronger. You will see more and more clearly what you want in life and what you can let go of because you no longer need it.

If you want to know more about meditation, mental health and the spiritual path, I recommend listening to amazing teachers like Eckhart Tolle, Sadhguru, Mooji and Pema Chödrön. Everyone describes these topics in slightly different ways. You can listen to them for hours on Youtube and read their books. But remember that only the practice itself will really change something. You don’t need to know and understand everything - the continuous practice itself is the most important part.

Finally, I would be delighted to hear from you - any feedback is welcome. I happily answer questions in the comment section and will continue to improve my writing. These topics are too important to stay silent about.",6.981683086429397,8.429133978934626,6.320261136712753,76.11498064689702,64.65859564164649,9.514367292388073,34.12490128181763,9.716738954075073,3.3866810730124013,18423,798,3104,371,279,5648,792,4130,0.07200000000000001,0.74,0.188,1.0,7,4,31,0,1,1,565.0,107,279,49,47,137,162,14,10,234,2,284,120,74,40,40,829,569,317,0,95,141,0,50,49,1,50,42,17,7,1,262,264,4,33,186,24,8,60,75,58,2,12,48,111,471,105,499,451,116,466,1,8,41,1,495,224,2,92,204,2290,733,31,0.018352576556797208,0.0,0.008954733664219177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607575737884555,0.058706195367469786,0.04581244166853055,0.0,0.0,0.01872057209293241,0.00962213835521504,0.0,0.0,0.02730123668986837,0.0,0.0,0.03020521353075649,0.02450652616159712,0.0,0.0,0.10345709882992947,0.09878398974663223,0.07661817418645385,0.07831292228596601,0.030403468377407906,0.062466763674799725,0.020677069104381558,0.0,0.016231362558172632,0.020036260324367942,0.4484826557722847,0.0,0.0,0.07496013042224225,0.0,0.009355837467382272,0.037706303147421606,0.10678025892755254,0.06323647862198199,0.019242327347420984,0.009916307692814706,0.010291987579853864,0.02197955852678491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.009460350285562791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038349072710099984,0.0,0.00939231988556842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.00938963377168188,0.02299683414302452,0.4335277471796177,0.0,0.018963117536122426,0.0,0.04242596304972462,0.0,0.007731418644619023,0.008768336691204897,0.04123528107070397,0.06283319509560308,0.0,0.010325875473197828,0.19951170401736126,0.045888795257179406,0.0,0.020104350551116302,0.008386961243977399,0.04683207673138089,0.0,0.0,0.007089577561123498,0.0,0.05273655076944764,0.026408195607263537,0.0469358648663426,0.02308990572561665,0.014678232012245537,0.020233780444155757,0.0,0.0,0.08926017561373509,0.009768329504742513,0.016440303781482327,0.009059684902088493,0.018835038265738763,0.058523792024115985,0.01034234380207334,0.0,0.0369040356309317,0.0,0.018409130664095046,0.0,0.009036795531710216,0.0,0.019646812781068158,0.010358912524663923,0.0,0.009577660888107152,0.0,0.032625226587275374,0.0,0.0,0.0605165766856473,0.0,0.0,0.01943272867078677,0.009970064063937224,0.06568363534050269,0.12314819193623527,0.2196704760894484,0.027591154657150785,0.008102830667220623,0.032482905461722535,0.10017502360574927,0.020531838759780097,0.0,0.015602704294240648,0.0,0.0,0.049001949447018564,0.037213264155598384,0.03687525981050305,0.069969676393858,0.0,0.009244145045997135,0.027742620895766883,0.009734591746568762,0.12971609413618634,0.0,0.0,0.02925882667340368,0.02023688316565377,0.1632984356665436,0.014154638441058544,0.017725032800697836,0.02927726006039313,0.008611324930461394,0.01798162840470176,0.035219584355947665,0.3029706857245944,0.009628970930342986,0.0293173426045287,0.03730854252990085,0.08374776882130228,0.019528435409289304,0.0,0.0,0.10930728581014976,0.02627941644117872,0.02544673155918205,0.00801238097875887,0.0,0.010072808942028971,0.008674558461577138,0.02068977254248999,0.008788347610340771,0.009335584114316607,0.01978718157981766,0.04390234298812936,0.0,0.0,0.01027954296403558,0.019520224231455104,0.045893857561638406,0.0,0.029392826217162406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.010394945808932651,0.06269200041092064,0.02618625450488656,0.06567617473402786,0.0,0.0,0.10968470549752887,0.016707496422737708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0075907204890379295,0.14440345494858342,0.01836583056810033,0.009354070302595502,0.0,0.15541581065107996,0.009075583744419942,0.0,0.01948507222064131,0.03912280944306916,0.07328195672623923,0.053702515214116994,0.0,0.0,0.010504654671030634,0.0,0.010413143194390849,0.0,0.0,0.034497133910944916,0.059004423412437224,0.008020480416598409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219263637634364,0.06467774507168489,0.0,0.2331183325344403,0.06420920986667751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099126611745472,0.029943499828156882,0.0,0.028658519151001212,0.05518972476169067,0.0,0.0,0.03028559539332294,0.11366066409664548,0.0364185525716562,0.0,0.0,0.016501170380399686,0.00850651116737379,0.03312069156366525,0.051224990793426746,0.0,0.04422807221882707,0.0,0.020041341467220336,0.0,0.0,0.03259285956200833,0.030098492143685457,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LadyFierenze,2020/01/24,"Venting about going to a psychiatrist and about why I love my girlfriend I (F,21) have been suffering from mental health issues for years now. After battling depression for years I finally got better. I am still going to therapy though, because it helps tremendously and I need it still.
I also have been struggling with anxiety ever since I was a child. It can take many forms, including panic attacks, and lately I haven't been able to eat properly, or sometimes at all. I have been feeling nauseous constantly, and I have been puking on the worst days. It has been going on for over a month, almost two. I lost 13 kilograms (which Google tells me is 28 lbs). I went to my doctor and I have been taking medication for my anxiety for two weeks now. I'm doing much better, I can eat, not as much as I should but it's enough. It's not perfect, but I can feel that it's going well.

After all this crap, I finally decided that it is time for me to go to a psychiatric doctor, to determine wether or not there is an underlying medical condition that could explain all the mental issues I have been facing for most of my life. It was a scary and difficult decision for me to make, because of my family's medical history, because I already know what it feels like to be diagnosed with an illness since I have been diagnosed with a chronic disease, and because of the stigma. But if there is a diagnosis that can help me understand why my life is the way it is, and if it can help me find solutions, I am all for it. 

There are two possibilities that my doctor, my therapist and I have been thinking about. The first one is bipolar disorder, and the second one is autism. It might none of them. It might be something else. It might be nothing at all other than being unlucky. But if it is, I know there's hope for me to cope and find balance. 
The last thing I wanted to do before my appointment was talk to my girlfriend about it. I know that she's there for me, but it was very scary to tell her. I don't want to weigh her down but I was so afraid to scare her away. I told her last night. She had the best reaction anyone could have. She told me that she was there no matter what, that she would not treat me differently as a person, that no matter what the results are they are not a label that would define me as a person. I felt so supported. I could never ask for a better reaction and I am so, so grateful to have her in my life. 

Sorry that was long. Take care you guys. You are not alone. And if I can tell you anything fron this experience it's that seeking professional help is scary but will help you so much on the long run.",3.4407019177062006,4.954721145038171,4.729886427108546,83.91509495438467,73.23664122137404,8.089294358592442,25.75758704151927,8.700769036622559,1.7954090113572887,2056,68,415,39,41,681,222,524,0.122,0.764,0.114,-0.0272,1,1,1,0,0,0,60.0,0,4,2,7,23,24,3,4,23,0,70,21,2,2,8,76,103,37,0,14,19,0,4,1,2,7,15,0,0,4,40,16,3,0,14,0,0,7,12,12,1,7,24,4,69,12,57,65,14,42,0,3,0,1,36,10,1,12,25,334,109,4,0.0687681010622745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688613196822503,0.0712230133263613,0.07588730954938025,0.05499382557427032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521481817214026,0.0,0.0,0.048084255200733464,0.0,0.05659028775230285,0.0,0.06428889148195271,0.07823364264374262,0.06460989465546649,0.0,0.0,0.1676815845005002,0.0,0.05851658899402393,0.0,0.0721678794101779,0.1824593910273752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011366218667205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431388693284356,0.0,0.16471719896074352,0.0,0.0,0.04434973614210957,0.0,0.059229864678051435,0.13959635004210655,0.0,0.07184802906586803,0.07881420160623996,0.21116119617354595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407338707239155,0.057446924307535674,0.0,0.0,0.07105583126947236,0.0,0.0,0.06220468445891365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726839840292788,0.06482844547724873,0.0,0.104313654441991,0.0491279451394052,0.06602816129812432,0.15066418671099474,0.12570559706344994,0.058494111633369976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19541248297600733,0.0,0.05500013250508775,0.0,0.0,0.0680912317570992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309727568781743,0.0,0.0,0.2304690428634267,0.0,0.0,0.06830224094097857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355206199090512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133794497078436,0.11211036144387372,0.07757341332589246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145718830483936,0.03359662056807092,0.0,0.0,0.1217152108683464,0.0,0.0,0.07506850578200414,0.0,0.06206589609462518,0.0,0.04590324145212436,0.06972006089688543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078298811472369,0.13860414288157075,0.21885626368252528,0.0,0.0,0.05489004218195381,0.0,0.15165740051967755,0.05099067558023193,0.05303819895818157,0.0,0.0,0.0645342043680212,0.0,0.06598484765519434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931980900244824,0.0,0.0,0.08068454968147873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009130667653622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752570135066211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06884886585556321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137713676573235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052941043903180884,0.06801341034638053,0.07698025901185812,0.0,0.0,0.1098365886794198,0.0,0.0,0.07189135038580538,0.0,0.0,0.07803722614660205,0.0,0.0,0.155115161109172,0.0552731947444854,0.18031905421553088,0.0,0.07864231676414572,0.07984506563422701,0.045686470667979484,0.0440638224264864,0.06756431013896476,0.0,0.04009923274783174,0.0,0.0,0.13142173511446328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20152932702582851,0.0715900184431692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056740885354536974,0.08112241545318183,0.05458491773160532,0.05516162264424479,0.0,0.06183078157191281,0.06374871864285132,0.1241050300296383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770177188286223,0.0,0.0,0.08856880486669436
mentalhealth,cierraaajule,2020/01/24,"What can I do to help him? Is he depressed? I think he’s depressed...what can I do?

So I do not suffer from depression so I have no idea how to really go about this. 

So my boyfriend and I have been dating for around 5 months now, and he told me in the beginning that he does get depressed (also we live in New Hampshire where it’s effing cold in January). 

So yesterday my boyfriend told me that he was starting to “lose interest” in me, and has loss interest in other things and he had no idea why he was. Not to get to TMI he told me that his sex drive is not even there as well, he can’t even get it up for himself to get off on his own, and trust me I know how sexual this guy is. He says that he is physically and mentally exhausted. He has also been sick as well this week. You know I asked him he he wanted to break up and his answer was no, and asked if he wanted to be with me and his answer was yes. (So I am leaving it at that).

As of recently he has done a shift change at work.. he went from working from 3:15pm -11:45pm and would be going to bed at like 4am from video games lol. Now he just started a new shift last week and is now working from 6:45AM-3:15pm. Now I can understand the physical exhaustion from dramatically going from going to bed at 4am routinely to now waking up at 5:30am. He says that he just looks forward to the weekends here he can just relax, and granted we are hanging out this weekend and going out. 


May I mind you the text messages are a little short compared to what we have been. His confidence seems to be a bit low, always asking if I’m okay. He still says the “I love you and love you”.


So what I am asking: “is this a sign of depression if so what can I do to help him?” Or if anyone can really just give me any sort of advice. 

I don’t want to go out there and blatantly say.. hey babe are you depressed?",2.098049589518201,3.380640717223653,3.682277137407748,91.01252591425491,76.27506426735219,7.1787378721287025,22.831163446388587,7.831003766801068,0.8441443071564803,1425,40,328,21,31,474,170,389,0.083,0.7809999999999999,0.136,0.9683,0,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,3,5,0,5,31,21,0,0,10,3,43,7,1,2,1,55,77,34,0,8,12,0,0,1,0,2,3,4,2,2,20,23,0,0,9,5,0,10,8,11,2,0,13,6,41,10,52,59,2,54,0,9,1,3,60,24,0,8,22,222,61,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636584968529065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14135807777048834,0.07354088896069677,0.0,0.0,0.06010277834690319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179873663291222,0.0,0.0,0.07867870183834418,0.3305008890356665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649023335384388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934964176738808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806163569302929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734366783745493,0.09044545291335604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675093080977135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847037505599392,0.08478405036159346,0.3013771020007444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751205734186722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848115872855625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19954499903981632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714485157811999,0.07204311132373398,0.0,0.093583757337476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04317897194361507,0.08858196450737314,0.07804290913069517,0.0,0.07421860511096212,0.09887683035866993,0.0,0.0,0.1595363784101591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906824995428103,0.0,0.08924060671090636,0.0,0.07054565463083777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17071973746156874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323952133617317,0.0,0.08726654451035161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811395971673319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045963680297352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251144431844296,0.0,0.07058196480449422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871706147285125,0.05663160520644413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25335831330673864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920087599744554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15638994822801386,0.0,0.14178938930445462,0.0,0.15893203171051626,0.08193098255653336,0.0797509916042569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19302940604582716,0.0,0.0,0.06278402404229998,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CielTheEarl,2020/01/24,"My cousin is doing self harm and I'm the only one that knows about it Hello everyone, I'm dealing in a situation where I've been reached out by my cousin who has been self harming herself for the past couple of months but I don't know how I can help her any further. To my surprise, I am the only person that knows about this. I only knew this for a couple of weeks now and when she told me about it, she made me promise her to never tell anyone about it (yes i know, im writing about this in public but she doesnt know reddit exists and its gotten worse so i need to reach out for her sake) and by not telling anyone, she's also disregarding her mother who is a psychiatrist.

She's been texting me everytime she feels like self harming to disturb herself from doing it but there are times when she didn't reach out to me and she does it again despite me trying to tell her that doing it won't help her with how she feels that she's ""not good enough"". I want to let her parents know as it is not a small matter but I also don't want to break her trust in me since we are very close to each other.

Even if I were to tell her parents, or even talk to her personally about it, we live 300km apart and the only way I can talk to her is by texting or calling. And I meet her very rarely. Right now I'm stumped as I really want to help her out but I feel like my words won't be enough for her to stop entirely and because of the promise I made, I am unable to tell her parents about it.

TL;DR My cousin is doing self harm and I'm the only one that knows about it despite her mother being a psychiatrist.",4.38802052785924,4.052063601173021,5.38559970674487,86.81839956011734,69.87976539589442,7.875718475073315,26.14090909090909,6.961326702584282,0.9613318475073308,1252,31,282,9,20,414,143,341,0.10099999999999999,0.8009999999999999,0.098,0.0444,3,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,2,0,0,0,22,12,0,1,11,1,29,0,0,4,1,54,52,26,0,5,11,8,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,6,22,18,0,2,11,0,0,0,10,5,0,2,10,3,56,7,44,37,3,26,0,0,0,0,63,13,0,3,13,202,78,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13646608738984528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058022796656713865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932012555549475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052012315758087284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712466925274702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18881730434939512,0.0,0.0,0.08796461639028552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466702929629702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632363594131678,0.0,0.11271052194555455,0.0,0.0,0.08153010725192401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294261322465176,0.1219100214372848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715651689536743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715713075911342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216384811489584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32824033156846844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724889537372076,0.0,0.08336934756891883,0.0,0.07534207188979382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16147001355224908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810427548014959,0.0,0.0,0.0632661750399741,0.06580661936540723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563460593108987,0.32446122216842066,0.0,0.0,0.2842244132151498,0.0,0.0814507819982316,0.0,0.14900209778594176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05466031605118745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286566565222842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35604340530911144,0.0,0.0,0.07058034806206756,0.0959070083979028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133413226799458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13715933644459802,0.37288179708765706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04975272535860458,0.0,0.0,0.08153010725192401,0.0,0.057928946684236864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080138158259367,0.1509777486959653,0.06772569534436869,0.06844123624541153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695177222951336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jnmnlclncbr,2020/01/24,"How to prioritize your MENTAL HEALTH Shut the fuck UP. Go to therapy and actually listen to your fucking therapist instead of talking over them, when you do this, you look STUPID. You’re the one that needs a therapist and they’re the ones doing the therapy, ya feel? Just shut up, you don’t know anything, take your meds even when you feel like you’re perfect and you don’t need meds, fuck you, you do and if you stop taking them you get worse; just admit that you’re flawed like the rest of us. We, as mental health patients, need the meds, it’s the world motherfucker, take the meds. Stop smoking weed, cigarettes, drowning yourself in alcohol like a fucking idiot, these substances cause more harm than they help you. You’re under the illusion that alcohol is harmless just because it’s legal, just how soda makes your bitch ass fat, alcohol makes your brain smaller and it’s LITERALLY. Start doing something physical, like just a few push ups a day is fine even if it’s three, you did three congratulations. Everything you do deserves a fucking reward if you’re depressed, laying down on your bed doesn’t make it go away, it just forces you to contemplate suicide. Death is eventual and we all die, to be grateful for existence makes life more bearable find something you love and hold on tight. Peace and love.",4.5308013937282245,6.770377585365857,4.568002322880375,83.17670731707321,71.92682926829268,7.775145180023228,28.380952380952376,8.563005593585519,2.1876123112659696,1050,41,192,19,21,325,133,246,0.18,0.664,0.156,-0.9047,0,0,6,0,0,1,33.0,3,21,3,2,14,20,8,0,14,0,13,17,3,7,2,40,40,16,4,6,9,0,3,4,0,0,7,1,1,0,11,10,5,4,5,0,0,3,3,10,0,4,1,5,27,10,20,38,5,22,0,1,1,8,33,13,7,3,10,118,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.08815911530608643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28963896620167257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434238142511848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487769939141107,0.0,0.0,0.05507061727388523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084966843350172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928043884828831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05826202925158131,0.0,0.07780998059114247,0.0,0.0937589836623096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193378515517906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119204958862519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913575549726602,0.06453913880367808,0.0,0.0,0.08256941089491952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4175908256330789,0.047199085721413764,0.0,0.1026849653652142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19205505984017995,0.0,0.0,0.060553208586707076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04964867430281825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06381003588504824,0.17654285779911916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586311147740914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16307132210228534,0.0,0.2412114460078369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4013908950341669,0.0,0.18208357770338504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20095859574185415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243387040226973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13909677562062076,0.0,0.0,0.06394333965549323,0.0,0.0,0.1510570963602833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881764134997467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037740207731584,0.07261212284809726,0.0,0.0,0.2066240459714644,0.2097841364678968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086682751586072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09206449857009147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,silbathrowaway77,2020/01/24,"Is it possible for a person with Antisocial Personality Disorder to have a healthy, non abusive relationship? My understanding is, even with treatment it is going to boil down to stringent self awareness and self discipline. Since noone is ever 100% on acts of self discipline, would it be safe to say that no matter what this person will be toxic and abusive at least occasionally?",11.692727272727275,10.471801606060607,11.22636363636364,53.75954545454547,55.66666666666667,14.254545454545458,44.72727272727273,13.023866798666859,6.1106727272727275,310,15,46,9,3,102,49,66,0.177,0.737,0.087,-0.8385,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,9,1,0,0,1,11,11,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,6,6,4,1,3,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,11,7,1,7,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,2,35,7,0,0.0,0.429140609115171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075528251573984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196128453474782,0.16381258370128385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292158541508646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4743806852619038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041596312556532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19443037965484736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14401558481713592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5667709284072028,0.0,0.0,0.14980529078549346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18852833979318792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286460965403362,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Corgan1,2020/01/24,Literally loosing reality Lately I’ve been loosing reality it’s wack and no I’m not on drugs any advice,-0.04142857142856826,1.2339953333333362,5.152761904761906,65.60057142857143,119.4761904761905,7.394285714285715,28.009523809523806,7.554174236665415,3.499620952380953,86,5,14,3,5,34,18,21,0.115,0.885,0.0,-0.29600000000000004,0,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4864892479609432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33855228131134885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5773431840355091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.561591855607805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mellowrug,2020/01/24,"Is it always going to be like this? It sounds really stupid and dramatic to say, but every day I wish I was dead. I don't want to exist, I don't want to take up space. I don't want to be anywhere. 

Logically I know all the reasons for which I deserve to live. I repeat those arguments in my head everyday, and I've been doing so for years. I know I will not do anything, I will not hurt myself or worse. 

I know life can be good and warm and wonderful, sometimes it does feel like that. I can be deeply touched by good things and people I come across. I have a really supportive family, and some incredibly close friends that I am forever grateful for. 

But I still wish I wasn't alive. I am young and I am so tired. I have to go through the same arguments with myself everyday, I feel like doing that takes most of my energy. I dread a life spent doing that, I know I can take it and go on but sometimes I wish I could just give up. I wish I didn't have anyone by my side so it would be so much easier. 

I am going to therapy and working on getting better. I am supported by the people around me. I am very successful in my studies and I actually enjoy it. But I still feel like this every day.",1.6034581818181834,3.2568864440000027,3.851418181818184,87.6897090909091,78.56,7.585454545454545,22.163636363636364,8.438071523408619,1.2280399999999996,921,27,204,19,22,318,120,250,0.122,0.602,0.276,0.9935,0,0,0,0,0,2,27.0,0,0,0,3,8,16,1,1,5,0,33,4,1,1,1,45,61,19,1,9,8,0,5,4,1,3,3,2,0,0,15,14,0,0,10,0,1,5,7,3,0,0,5,7,41,13,25,47,5,25,0,1,0,0,3,11,0,4,13,148,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.09938295947022392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474058161677653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121019285276475,0.0,0.08380716905382092,0.09066084254430884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007084452500239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772774025987902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131243415123025,0.0,0.0,0.13135914242467794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912249348010333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17161231023000068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600743706038332,0.0,0.15448290545379048,0.21826752436317626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868276442810128,0.0,0.05320816579200677,0.09769598710327353,0.2315162922327529,0.17084023198958687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451912445277924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902381196114727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22387848012565886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438678278051972,0.1990191441972881,0.0,0.08992822366255074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486548138935988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120863813632903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13048500005433944,0.10471038852361846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098873061011824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20144839707389736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626620736767069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311378600082625,0.0,0.0,0.22971720141780064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646503662757388,0.0,0.06765920306860393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705223060895792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084030195993793,0.18020689386746705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4684524281185963,0.0,0.11044314730304387,0.07414208326203571,0.0,0.10378555068605827,0.07234553170046112,0.0,0.0,0.06558281550755922
mentalhealth,JayPixel,2020/01/24,"I feel insignificant and like I am not special... Im just gonna vent here to let some steam off. I haven't had real friends in a really long time. Ive finally found a group that i love, but since it is such a large group, of course there will be people who prefer others over others. I know i shouldnt be complaining because i got what i want, but ive become hungry for more. Ive been craving for people to consider me their best friend. I want to feel like im someones special friend, not just that person you speak to once in a while.",4.105941845764852,4.168635017699113,5.116333754740836,87.13318584070801,70.50442477876106,8.227054361567639,24.99241466498104,7.957251820313856,1.1078910240202269,419,10,94,5,7,138,76,113,0.031,0.703,0.267,0.9796,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,1,5,10,0,0,4,0,13,1,0,0,0,17,22,4,0,4,6,0,2,2,3,3,0,1,0,1,7,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,3,15,9,11,12,3,8,0,0,0,1,12,4,0,1,6,61,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154537507490046,0.20209150072290696,0.0,0.0,0.19203046538827204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18504446181654866,0.1307238378873439,0.0,0.20045007646003735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20063255991876427,0.4241190563952824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634905622402292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3953083363616137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056324536070926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18711358295595965,0.0,0.17879352243374858,0.0,0.0,0.1619351211294142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16515024425271013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19487203534184244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537161931059178,0.15977460955384962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20827590284234893,0.11722426442230235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15136629243961722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15504178702161903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669946781327752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21585746069044512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HcJamesH,2020/01/24,"25(M) heads just always unbearable. I’ve posted a few times about myself, currently on Quetiapine.

Everyday is struggle with just feeling, my partner of almost 2 years is pregnant with my first child, my upbringing wasn’t bad, never been abused by anyone psychically/mentally(was bullied but I dealt), my dad was violent but he left when I was 4 and had regular contact(don’t see him now but he’s a good “friend”).

I don’t understand why I can’t emphasise/relate too people who show any emotion, I know how to go about it but I just don’t get why I feel nothing for anything.

It’s been ongoing since I was in my early teens, I’ve always had suicidal thoughts but without the intent too act, I think of a lot of “wrong” things that someone shouldn’t really think about, it’s only within the last year I’ve gone to seek help as it feels as time goes on I’m becoming less and less capable of coping.

I just don’t get why, I was always an extremely hyper kid and I always felt I brushed everything off because I didn’t care as it doesn’t affect me.

There’s obviously more that’s occurred than what’s been stated, I have missed out a few “bigger incidents” that occurred when I was 18-22 but at that point I was already struggling within myself. 

James.",6.348885017421602,6.225985723577239,7.0441579558652725,75.85609756097561,65.7479674796748,10.443205574912893,32.61207897793264,10.125756701596842,3.166520092915216,992,37,188,21,14,329,150,246,0.12300000000000001,0.8029999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.9236,1,0,0,0,1,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,14,9,1,2,7,0,22,1,1,3,2,34,39,15,1,1,11,1,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,12,6,0,0,9,1,0,3,10,6,0,1,16,6,26,3,26,22,6,29,0,1,1,0,10,11,0,2,13,121,38,0,0.0,0.15116368141587996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277548371434847,0.0,0.14078979196846936,0.0,0.424633422956438,0.0,0.0,0.08676006252887894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920822634072867,0.0,0.10498902764365567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652555194787347,0.07777273808675149,0.14090417773688424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007824327973835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351245809991514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466237932250432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19352771623564105,0.0,0.12249862524345324,0.0,0.0,0.10852109341000928,0.0,0.0,0.09856945441404986,0.0,0.133312547178815,0.0,0.0725077301846678,0.10700963916037164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093583007697635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551545388178565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701156720961355,0.10399627130621994,0.0,0.0,0.13861810055431278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846556345617664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839902141801066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224182676867851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703177904394017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844922087331919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060612744110202,0.0,0.1221881870511662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173222787772276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166625101184758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553706067297014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809972431790704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667525921066874,0.0,0.139553884076519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475974098057794,0.16349865160850888,0.0,0.10128577237907832,0.14878805613707702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281725051899654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3453684442866663,0.0,0.0,0.12298439253421795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949077236784793,0.0,0.1643171129154847
mentalhealth,h6des,2020/01/24,"everyone I love has died at least once I’m not sure if others relate, but my mind is able to conjure up these situations involving a death of some sort. I understand it isn’t real, but I truly feel that it is. Can that be considered a delusion? It doesn’t last long and I understand that it’s a figment on my imagination, yet I go through all the emotions and it physically hurts me. 

I am diagnosed bipolar.  

Is there some sort of an explanation? Is it a relatively normal thing?",3.2483421052631565,5.103253242105262,5.437039473684212,77.2324013157895,74.47368421052632,9.381578947368425,29.769736842105264,9.827888789773867,3.124815789473685,378,17,74,11,8,132,67,95,0.145,0.787,0.068,-0.8111,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,6,0,10,3,0,0,2,19,16,5,2,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,12,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,1,9,2,7,15,4,7,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,5,3,56,21,0,0.22027348175961184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22357294726564111,0.2286090973687044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24777801897946314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21048075143399048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137689085524573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12518649588836658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358073180281759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795522871440608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19493509975502327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988054173389618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224134236660613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158212436359084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23458406912523924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25071944624473513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475966225949033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20760514972885571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14633991353390688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4586249257466449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kawaiimoka,2020/01/24,"Racing thoughts, intense focus and not able to relax Hi!

I have diagnosed anxiety, depression and I score high on several of the criteria for autism spectrum disorder (Asperger’s), but not all of them. I’m in grad school, where I perform well. 

I have some very heavy issues at the moment however. Whatever I do or get interested in, I spend so much effort and energy on it that it harms my mental health, and I’m not able to do anything else. 

Take, for instance, school. I feel I always HAVE to read and study more than everyone else, and perform better than them. If I don’t get an A+ or at least an A, I feel like a failure. This has some negative consequences - I stay up all night to work on essays, and around the days when grades are due I can’t do anything except for checking every 10 mins if it’s arrived or not. I’m totally unable to do anything else.

Unfortunately, it’s not only school that impacts me this way. Take, for instance, last fall. I came across a series of news articles about a young guy who 15 years ago went missing after a party in a nearby county. After huge searches and a police investigation suspecting foul play, he was found dead a month later, drowned, downstream in a river. 

I found the case fascinating, I read all about it that I could find, I even went to the place where the party was, I drove the exact route he probably walked to the place believed he fell in the river, and I went to the place he was found. I tracked down the guy’s family and friends he was with that day on social media, people he had argued with at the party, etc. I then made the conclusion that the guy had been murdered - the latter folks had gone to look for him after he left the party to walk home, caught up with him by the river, they started arguing and they pushed this drunk teen into the cold river.

It all made sense to me - I really believed I had solved a murder case, and I considered contacting the local police. I didn’t, and after a while, my interest in the case dwindled after a very intense month or so. During this month, I was rarely in school, and when I was, I’d be sitting on my computer researching this case.

Another, more «stable», yet intense, interest of mine is soccer. And by that I don’t mean only following a team in the MLS and a team in the Premier League. I know the names of just about every team in college soccer, and in the top 4 divisions in England and Italy. I can spend a day looking through the internet for videos of match highlights from Serie D (the 4th level in Italy), that get about 150 views each. 

Lately, I’ve developed a fear of flying and an (unwilling) interest in plane crashes and flight safety. I keep reading through accident investigation reports from all corners of the world, and I scour the internet to find out what changes that have been done to the planes and pilot training after major accidents.

I’m awful at putting things aside and going to sleep, and when I finally get in bed, my thoughts keep racing, preventing me from falling to sleep. I’ll wake up either early (like today) or late, but never energized and rested. 

My intense focus on important and unimportant stuff makes me skip stuff that needs to be done - cleaning my apartment, changing bedsheets, taking out the trash. I know it should be done, but I procrastinate, because I can’t/don’t want to think about it.

All of this makes me a very stressed person. I never relax, I always have millions of thoughts racing through my head. It’s like I’m not able to filter out stuff and say to myself «you don’t have to think more about this» until I feel I’m through everything there is to read and say about the topic. 

As you can imagine, I tend to do well at trivia nights, and I get good grades in school, but that’s about all that is positive about this. It stresses me out, and it ruins my mental health. I feel like I’m about to hit a giant wall where I at best won’t be able to do anything else than stay in bed, or at worst develop schizophrenia or another form of paranoia.

I have seen a psychologist/therapist and received cognitive therapy, but I feel it hasn’t had any effect, so I stopped it. Wasn’t worth paying for. 

Does anyone have any advice? I’m desperate to get better, but I feel kind of hopeless at the moment.",6.248773092369476,6.248389751807232,6.6217018072289155,78.386608935743,65.93975903614458,9.663654618473897,31.38805220883534,9.354420925462401,2.6558172690763064,3354,117,639,57,48,1088,360,830,0.136,0.746,0.11699999999999999,-0.9728,1,0,0,0,0,1,110.0,0,1,4,13,27,33,4,3,55,1,51,8,4,5,11,116,109,56,4,6,24,0,6,4,1,2,3,2,4,4,37,42,1,4,23,14,5,17,17,13,2,1,34,13,70,20,120,67,23,119,0,4,4,0,32,59,0,11,43,428,107,22,0.2254441312572477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05507534896806485,0.04996065495976052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379378857942054,0.0,0.0,0.07665487003179954,0.11819891422957035,0.04311603583601794,0.0,0.0,0.03940894460305245,0.0,0.18552131093982568,0.05017326843759573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0343571624794111,0.0,0.0,0.12699916730375654,0.059147426739222686,0.09969350678701763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446200678911078,0.0,0.0,0.11924499902256942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04499969856324816,0.0,0.0,0.1090446105999618,0.0,0.04854367497633648,0.05720526191610618,0.0,0.0,0.06459462649609139,0.0,0.049321919626102134,0.1730307141050272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883296433063509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285744995414344,0.037225930620292905,0.0,0.09497320195494134,0.053855382153074456,0.05065366211312848,0.0,0.05313216573386647,0.06342183121593963,0.1709869899028268,0.08052866620802257,0.0,0.061740756542559214,0.1030259258521606,0.0,0.0,0.1853908901689706,0.04354439414275058,0.0,0.17667788057780662,0.0,0.032031273788884373,0.047272960293554815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16741885066537518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05784267982584464,0.11981828464180135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059548525603748036,0.056534711310480185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058826275202108536,0.0,0.1001925511967833,0.0,0.05869134260670447,0.061949099332800926,0.04594176415050735,0.12715539985667304,0.0,0.06123642706290627,0.0,0.0,0.11014061490936296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465814535037036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666034400332852,0.07524285410829099,0.0,0.0,0.061393687537730765,0.0,0.0,0.11359732964086902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13496051603029724,0.0,0.04143184410207068,0.04179099168375863,0.0869382061077144,0.0,0.0,0.10578202259032264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857302103613829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03907364363759767,0.049212279907078695,0.17665585036983822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607667259619635,0.0,0.0,0.056658405000102316,0.0,0.0,0.2255051396409062,0.0,0.03610632082757453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08964111092031034,0.0,0.2852018709000943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367192454999694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280347215633015,0.057452975241964674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039892629114613866,0.12014672381204322,0.0,0.047120347112755034,0.1291227453294836,0.0,0.19355969494028186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712944737785334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445375293588093,0.06543950312364083,0.03744376582619752,0.07222774813730108,0.0,0.1342330933983192,0.0,0.0,0.05342366898537708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395112640299972,0.03324319741788871,0.04473676445786348,0.0,0.0,0.1013506743759974,0.15674172622767693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04103150314548018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036294657263370465
mentalhealth,Noortje_mentalhealth,2020/01/24,"Survey with prize draw on young people’s mental health Are you interested in young people’s mental health? From a list of research ideas for mental health and wellbeing of children and young people, help us choose what is most important. 

Who can take the survey?
- you are a young person (16-29) with or without experience of mental health difficulties, or
- you are a family member or care for a young person with mental health difficulties, or
- you are a healthcare professional, teacher, or organisation and support the wellbeing of young people

Anonymous survey (does not store IP address), takes about 20 minutes. Find [here](https://redcap.fmhs.auckland.ac.nz/surveys/?s=9L9KHDFL7R).

If you leave your name and contact details you are entered into a lucky prize draw to win NZD 150 ($99 USD, £75 GBP) and you will get a summary of the survey findings. 

This research is a collaboration between the University of Auckland, University of Otago, Orygen, and the University of York.",9.692085889570553,11.061826337423318,8.575588957055219,62.611972392638044,58.6319018404908,10.691779141104297,35.9319018404908,10.577609850970193,4.187906012269939,795,32,111,17,10,246,94,163,0.033,0.807,0.16,0.9703,0,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,1,8,0,3,1,7,0,0,13,0,9,5,0,0,0,25,14,12,0,1,8,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,3,3,10,0,0,4,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,9,7,21,13,1,10,0,0,0,0,16,3,0,8,6,69,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369899572793647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758926275832236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090850071741582,0.10512828620678738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038490031435242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0582630205866465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5926866873695272,0.0,0.0,0.07474748259528657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588909918476535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808038253256115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5619144456970643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092473370688976,0.194744655163275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654815004013792,0.0,0.0,0.16769378454215586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341411990488797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749839149718134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cheese_monkey_92,2020/01/24,"Hypnotised in a realm of a death. When i was about 15, my ""friends"" and I became enthusiastic bong smokers. They could ""handle"" their pot without it effecting their mood, but just around the time the initial thrill of getting high wore off, there were moments where it seemed that I would slip off into a pretty f'kin dark place when I was stoned. Add to that I didnt look after my skin very well and I was a bit grungey and dirty at the time, I had some moments that predicted the future in that I was hypnotised in a deathly state, confused and incapacitated. These experiences may have been a factor in leading me to my current attitude on people that try to tell me that they know better or lack emotional intelligence to the point that they are intolerable. I know better because I've been to places in my mind they will never have the courage to go to. Anyway, I'm dirty, i need a shower.",6.5576744186046465,6.682112906976747,6.691255813953493,77.72467441860469,65.27906976744185,9.438139534883721,31.734883720930227,9.120678840339163,2.518921395348838,708,25,137,11,10,227,108,172,0.125,0.733,0.142,0.4849,2,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,6,4,9,8,0,1,13,0,16,1,1,2,1,25,25,8,2,4,4,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,10,7,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,1,1,0,10,2,22,6,23,11,3,29,0,0,1,0,8,16,0,5,10,100,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16870651013994512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115525202178562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33521722099029017,0.20689881951995512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15131049537658725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21317631531297954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18537981612889926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464170663132853,0.0,0.09901258040184152,0.0,0.10770445268043476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002306058869325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20830248218229214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914296452744608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913538348904363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14052128916065165,0.14616390168504031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13138426620043525,0.0,0.3960009375479556,0.0,0.1791507872728504,0.0,0.0,0.1928025790753228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725252732314632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564248051408528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22101279561249174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286667048014881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156367850933659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17039470525595912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18268351046706235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346244071296659,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coma-ish,2020/01/24,"Would it be appropriate to just tell someone i am/have been sick? If i am put in a situation where someone asks me a question (i.e. “why haven’t you been working?” or “why haven’t you gone out of the house lately?” etc) and I’m not comfortable blasting my info to them and talking about my mental health and disorders, would it be appropriate to just tell them i have been sick? Or could that seem misleading and/or deceptive?",3.726655052264807,5.766500585365852,4.520034843205576,83.52060975609757,73.6341463414634,8.10034843205575,27.567944250871076,8.841846274778883,2.159726132404182,336,13,66,7,7,108,54,82,0.158,0.8420000000000001,0.0,-0.9179,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,2,1,4,1,0,0,3,0,12,3,0,0,0,16,16,6,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,4,0,10,1,7,7,1,6,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,5,1,46,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849324319233962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15794098317369715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267157145995339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061853217961366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102704938335705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282545551187467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231464822034344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19935326793542815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19886098077283976,0.2216006004402941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800854012715388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223548850803911,0.0,0.0,0.3352198398209702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899801798795446,0.3458020035241084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35699861186360604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440133190844203,0.0,0.0,0.2810474074295518,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KYLA_BOSS,2020/01/24,"BFF confusing and hurtful So, I have quite the list of mental health issues, and my bff hasn’t been supportive, at all, to my face. She shares so much supportive stuff about survivors of SA and people in therapy, and with eating disorder on social media. Except to my face the first time I disclosed being assaulted, she laughed and said that I shouldn’t drink so much, the 2nd time that I have to be more careful and dress differently. She also appears to be well aware that people with EDs can’t just “stop” but tells me that I have to, and being an adult with bulimia means I need to grow up. And any time I mention that things are rough, I hear something about how people have it worse and then a rant on how shit her job is or something completely off topic.
Sorry for the long vent, I just really don’t understand what I’m supposed to do/feel in regards to her behaviour. Pls help me make sense of her.",6.3599999999999985,6.0656793296089395,6.421167597765365,80.90784078212292,65.75977653631284,9.841564245810057,30.19050279329609,9.3871,2.396818547486033,716,22,143,12,10,228,112,179,0.124,0.769,0.107,-0.7377,2,0,3,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,11,10,2,1,6,0,15,6,3,3,1,28,26,18,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,9,12,2,1,2,1,0,2,4,4,1,1,2,3,20,6,25,19,4,16,0,1,0,0,14,7,1,3,7,101,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142465850809406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715096991003268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456571967616246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497879516593984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14926024657960876,0.1637320789264472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995024360729774,0.0,0.1461833575636208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223525352081545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151823285017045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15185548629954554,0.16101570932660295,0.0,0.0957572994388608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152936585579203,0.0,0.0,0.14911067463054922,0.14176836110423954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642825852636333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536140694501352,0.0,0.0,0.15561845680958647,0.0,0.0,0.1439711625526456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100398233279969,0.10593026571945123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971272960794408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195118297131033,0.0,0.0,0.09152097151365644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589435252468265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664565562043155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14562968449776215,0.0,0.2199640928194808,0.0,0.15992216615070035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194389194738054,0.0,0.0,0.16354266068276818,0.0,0.3242359120624485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248675704592056,0.0,0.1633749978172248,0.0,0.09491107781123788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24991171415881536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872424399658898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844997731493638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558844961355388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Airmed96,2020/01/24,"Is it always going to be like this? I've been in the NHS services since I was 18. I'm now 23, and things have only gotten worse for illnesses that have disrupted my life since I was a child. It's been 6 and a half months since I last saw a psychiatrist. Since then my work life has gone to hell, I moved cities, and it's taken 2 months for an urgent referral to MH services here. First appointment in new city was yesterday.

It was a CPN and a GP trainee. Sigh.

Good news:

Been referred to therapy services ""urgent"" (cue 2 month wait probably, just for the assessment, this was an urgent referral and took 2 months).
Will be seeing a CPN weekly until I am in therapy.
No more medication. FINALLY. After 18 attempts.

Bad news:

CPN and I may not click. I've tried mindfulness in multiple ways, and it doesn't work for me. Stupid brain doesn't switch off, it's always go go go. She shoved a mindfulness leaflet into my hand and told me to try this one, moments after she and GP trainee tell me that I am the expert and know what is right for me.

I am a risk to myself. Hence the weekly meetings. Oh great. That's really helped the ideation! And the voices! They've fallen in love with that and are asking me to prove the NHS right. Please, piss off.

I'm sick of it. I'm sick of getting worse. Self help doesn't help. I know my job is part of the issue but I'm struggling to find a new job. I'm tired of feeling like this. I'm tired of waking up to those stupid thoughts. I'm tired of feeling bad around my period every month (incoming PMDD diagnosis probably, fantastic). I'm tired of the 7 day long migraines. I'm tired of the stress, of my hair falling out, of my awful eating schedule. I'm tired of developing sky high anxiety and being scared to leave the house.

Is it always going to be like this?",1.568185857089965,3.752790630136984,3.1285301740096263,90.20298407997038,81.05479452054793,6.576082932247317,21.09774157719363,7.730073105063049,0.8338848574601999,1400,41,298,24,37,460,179,365,0.20199999999999999,0.721,0.078,-0.9943,2,0,0,0,0,0,55.0,0,0,0,4,4,17,4,4,22,1,28,20,5,0,1,34,59,16,0,0,3,0,4,3,0,2,13,1,0,2,20,17,1,1,8,0,0,10,5,10,1,3,15,8,24,6,42,38,2,49,1,0,3,1,12,15,2,1,26,161,44,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909204303046959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05850943322595367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680862570608829,0.07150146089079874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12772054273532554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538053778864943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04932533212479608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826140038828934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444038871258699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734440078764462,0.05463960829090644,0.0,0.08378359935467486,0.06990425270211681,0.06505656481057095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03995931156366762,0.0,0.2173358054090136,0.06415047348528125,0.0,0.08432299018330988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537952160161147,0.08080869251912826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825133577830263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07982858243183115,0.15179553480897168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406632522075676,0.062344010290508185,0.0,0.08098465798144862,0.0,0.0,0.10804468204614533,0.11209747420914604,0.0,0.0,0.06768521893211879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902906769683544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704877040828574,0.0,0.0,0.15445244384616286,0.0,0.3052407744088275,0.08128953002351398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773588860244768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051826990910656325,0.058168914666269535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828238446796013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395557833409165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649236357699297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048997091836793086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13063245768165427,0.0,0.0,0.07657301869529573,0.0,0.06094720243014064,0.0,0.07978865056084912,0.0,0.0,0.25307075009456104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761123905894996,0.07995683950220818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684968172911057,0.0,0.174930393318475,0.0,0.05081203486954163,0.0,0.0,0.06071911190825222,0.0,0.5274370746485995,0.0,0.07308296843262267,0.08497564149521132,0.10385413498298217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06070879852562824,0.12270040790103445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136135068546713,0.0,0.15588581541722815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wildwolf454,2020/01/24,"Is it normal? I found out that when my friends say things like their parents are gonna beat them they don’t mean it literally.
I can defend my self rn now but when I was a kid my mom always beat me over everything everyday but we talk and laugh about it normally so I thought that it’s normal and common.

I don’t get it is that affecting the current me or does me not realizing that it’s bad makes it ok for me mentally?
I’m only asking because I’m tryna heal my suppressed emotions so idk if that counts because I remember not giving a shit about it as a kid(I used to be scared then I only got pissed when it happens)",1.6818447837150146,3.5271309694656523,3.620171755725192,88.55152989821886,79.0,6.809414758269721,23.89376590330789,7.793537801064563,1.1691216284987265,491,17,106,8,12,166,87,131,0.141,0.748,0.111,-0.7373,2,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,3,2,8,8,2,1,4,1,8,3,2,3,0,22,21,13,0,4,6,2,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,2,15,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,1,19,4,7,15,0,10,0,0,0,0,13,2,2,2,9,68,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070575066476315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15808680158866564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119244450846175,0.20616505253046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479816058254524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19021609750926727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15197726117038032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854107453007263,0.13064717307820448,0.0,0.08834840127858297,0.16221728645274813,0.0,0.0,0.13524568295166428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495356389118972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261430812328246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11287636878535552,0.0,0.0,0.1842007881739345,0.0,0.0,0.17041424365854071,0.0,0.0,0.1980492899103592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4970498379126427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572181758780803,0.0,0.0,0.1877668786288992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19155870325551025,0.0,0.0,0.1344760670562465,0.16929980818176776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17640943853587082,0.0,0.1735799589673276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135917144771365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234332801962776,0.0,0.0,0.13424746959422054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14604914904605215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,injf1987,2020/01/24,"Lite I’m so tired of being ugly and unwanted and I don’t feel like trying to be worth something because no matter how hard I try I’m not worth anything meaningful and the truth is that I’ve given up on being enough  because I am inherently not enough and men find me disgusting and not worth oxygen as my future isn’t going anywhere and I’m so  stupid because I thought that maybe i would matter or mean
Something but I’m just worthless shit. Maybe the next time around. But for now just a piece of shit person signing off xoxo.",3.178369678089304,5.010142766355145,4.0447975077881635,87.23880581516096,74.60747663551402,6.250882658359295,24.973001038421607,6.937597516519254,0.9966539979231565,424,14,83,4,9,136,70,107,0.242,0.63,0.129,-0.9375,1,0,2,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,4,0,3,0,8,3,2,1,1,27,17,13,0,2,8,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,7,0,0,5,0,3,1,6,5,0,0,2,2,7,2,9,11,3,9,0,1,0,0,2,4,2,1,5,51,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14926985682579502,0.16147700893707653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3317239641049568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3748520879291827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171705889230568,0.12958621750083096,0.0,0.0,0.16578866463794126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103089044125296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16249127251728332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861878850973738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3644645482623693,0.19758866304555397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929120575168909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158384175674206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723918053105233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792882792264777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400469345073222,0.10577091880663747,0.20848299616132296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463060213135749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288554103525288,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xAlfafllfflx,2020/01/24,"I broke down 4 times at school today and I'm scared of it happening again. I had a horrible night the night before. I had disturbing thoughts about killing the people who were close to me, I could see imaginary scars all across my body. I lacked sleep, but I still pushed through to even go to school. It was during my 3rd class when I had horrible thoughts again. How I thought I was worthless to people, I saw the imaginary scars again, but it was more than last night. I was bashing my head with my phone, I kept telling myself to calm down but I couldn't. I kept on crying. After that, I told my friends goodbye to go home. I needed to rest. I told mom about it but I never told her everything. I visit my psychiatrist at least once a month and I am taking two types of medicines once every night. I'm scared that I would get these kinds of thoughts again and I would have a horrible day and I'm afraid that it would also affect my grades...  


Any suggestions?",1.8420312500000016,4.177228307291667,2.3508749999999985,95.306625,81.03125,5.923333333333334,21.058333333333334,7.1686216300943375,0.43095333333333263,753,22,164,10,20,231,105,192,0.149,0.795,0.055,-0.9495,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,12,10,1,4,6,0,15,3,3,2,2,27,35,11,1,7,4,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,10,6,0,2,4,0,0,4,2,7,0,1,18,2,32,3,22,12,5,28,0,2,2,0,11,7,0,0,17,109,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919141241457134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07816029076808617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780190719986594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766777228327278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176689028943977,0.0,0.12625158813647472,0.07412408776854906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591401720954405,0.0,0.09683837539473968,0.0,0.10329689314163902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879912016302809,0.0,0.060049215888140176,0.0,0.13064133678514078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016373554477466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795729800644986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528998673362455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715944241368432,0.11968795725063197,0.0,0.09368802381147796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461142923027625,0.09174066540728176,0.0,0.0,0.08522344529797551,0.08864558071021285,0.0,0.0,0.4314378794336744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448057688774006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936403502171687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23014158907688495,0.23264234768547534,0.09158895820000418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150188132825864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917878847506946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641742369068943,0.0,0.10045896220731523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3649847724433744,0.06701999394376494,0.0,0.10894570690845468,0.3294782700771253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227558360612593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449413010366861,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KyLyWySy,2020/01/24,"Inpatient Psych Treatment I just turned 18 and I feel like I need to check into a psychiatric hospital again, currently going through another cloud of deep depression. I’m not quite ready to go into an adult unit yet. Does anyone think they can help me find an inpatient hospital? I’ll dm my location and such for anyone who is willing to help me. I’m trying to get help before I get urges to harm myself.",3.5298191681735998,5.692370227848103,4.793707052441231,80.79518987341773,74.56962025316456,9.071247739602173,26.475587703435806,9.606745405546679,2.7029840867992765,324,12,60,9,7,107,58,79,0.113,0.7609999999999999,0.126,0.0189,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,4,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,10,13,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,3,0,1,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,9,1,10,12,0,8,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,33,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521778722467048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363165850469302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20464182399111708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20713626256823253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104570389246736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160048332259088,0.17180824233090816,0.0,0.0,0.21980623880506756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512953258359816,0.0,0.27335542029578824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4835921517217132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174927286634848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783225071157795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557939010406645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540981993037525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16327895594735276,0.2615873172027854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mikemakesreddit,2020/01/24,"I'm pretty sure my coworker is schizophrenic, and I don't know how to approach it He's always talking about the people spying on him everywhere, and arguing with them through the vents at work.  Usually it's just like...ok, but he's still working.  Lately it seems to have gotten worse, he's super pissed at the people he talks to through the vents, and throwing stuff around is normal if you're mad about work but extra uncomfortable if it's a guy mad about govt agents who keep stealing his drones",7.692680412371132,6.9208867216494845,7.182185567010308,78.12338144329897,63.22680412371135,10.234226804123713,32.802061855670104,9.3871,2.741772783505154,400,13,76,6,5,125,68,97,0.254,0.6659999999999999,0.08,-0.9716,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,4,7,7,4,0,5,0,4,2,1,1,1,16,9,8,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,1,0,5,2,13,8,1,9,0,0,0,0,12,4,1,3,3,44,11,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17637302740410782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886950379790789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098800640823905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840547807656235,0.0,0.0,0.1164911915785564,0.0,0.23910733496505734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355607757151958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20768207001537065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29390162928483904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156460349449692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19296625220779698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16927664308425686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24265081868845995,0.0,0.0,0.1997758261196772,0.0,0.0,0.3407411308520366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23345104629639296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4629421972382526,0.0,0.2160118732496244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DikkeSappigeLeuter,2020/01/24,"Need stimulants to be able to focus in school but they make me anxious, insecure and depressed but i feel like im becoming dependent on them. Title says it all. In class now so i cant make a long post now anyway",0.8465909090909136,3.1537122954545467,3.1283636363636376,88.30754545454548,85.13636363636364,7.156363636363636,22.43636363636364,8.238735603445708,1.5229509090909097,167,6,35,4,5,57,37,44,0.218,0.716,0.066,-0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,2,0,4,3,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,4,1,10,6,4,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,5,1,5,5,1,7,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,4,22,6,2,0.2874981788060898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247911089477851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31751915090657745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24762176013047696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536771755808742,0.2053887563839229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105473680457556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404570880707134,0.0,0.0,0.2544268412033085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3838145336260204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21317625670851945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27534378345933536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286300911185541,0.0,0.29096350574698976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Creators_Alt,2020/01/24,"How do I get over triggers It’s a sound that usually does it, I don’t have full on panic attacks from it but I just kind of tense up and I get really angry. I can’t stand that sound for more than 2 seconds. How do I get over this? I’m really tired of it I want to be able to be free from it I’m just so tired of it.",-2.7563157894736814,-1.1259166315789455,0.8818947368421064,102.27626315789476,96.89473684210527,4.618947368421053,12.86315789473684,6.2581,-1.0836221052631578,240,4,68,3,10,87,45,76,0.261,0.667,0.073,-0.9452,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,1,1,0,7,2,0,3,0,8,13,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,9,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,2,7,3,13,11,2,7,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,47,16,0,0.24645010283403074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28037257066573823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21567014578799576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38628002063370825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25663985733804073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891560950346854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157644931820571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.566516277866035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714299700634161,0.0,0.14536265595349834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fkincancer,2020/01/24,"nothing interests me anymore nothing interests me. i try to do things that i used to enjoy and it brings me no joy anymore. i constantly feel bored, yet cant bring myself to do the things i need to like clean my room or even shower; going to class is completely out of the question. all i do is scroll through my phone, eat, or sleep.

i feel very hopeless. ive been on and off meds for a couple months now and idk if its doing more harm than good. i got off for over a month to get rid of the brain fog, but it still stuck even when i was medication-free for a while. i go to therapy every once in a while but i feel like that doesnt help too much either.

how do i get past this? i feel so broken.",1.7532997762863507,3.007468664429531,3.2699496644295287,93.73409675615216,77.12080536912751,6.577404921700225,21.141498881431765,7.1686216300943375,0.30274451901565946,537,13,128,6,12,177,97,149,0.151,0.759,0.09,-0.795,1,0,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,0,0,9,10,0,0,7,0,12,3,2,2,1,19,26,13,0,2,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,8,4,1,0,5,0,0,4,3,3,0,0,4,4,19,7,20,22,4,21,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,4,12,89,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122060960446744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17571556870194405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16503570794784053,0.17009843256113566,0.0,0.0,0.17416517448360808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16106418198816946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079284818563181,0.0,0.13262014790813226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3183539415962502,0.11244986378809683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644747933944606,0.0,0.17891330102077102,0.13202349414650466,0.12589082223924813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550497238924067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537998544779228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748410046563947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512776689181234,0.0,0.11571047789944305,0.11671350200358772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020678805046703,0.0,0.0,0.16763074114442694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15026048282416093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632915393441045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575182562447557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570350134635727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18000585579174538,0.0,0.20914521822539936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686737787806007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359470192281191,0.0,0.1298752636860429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Galit-G,2020/01/24,"I care so much about people but when it comes to myself I could care less The last few weeks I’ve been having these moments where I just get so disgusted with myself I don’t know how to react. I lost 15 pounds and was feeling so good but then I gained it back. Now I just feel gross to the point where I feel like staying home so no one has to look at me, or I’ll wear a jacket and want to keep it on until I’m sweating like crazy.🙃 I was doing so good and now I really don’t feel okay. Any tips to help would be nice 💕 (also I go to  counselling but idk how she can help because I just think this is something I just have to get used to)",0.7992424242424221,2.0285598741258752,2.507849650349652,98.30741550116552,79.62937062937063,5.326107226107227,17.511072261072258,5.46131890053228,-0.7447011655011657,494,8,125,2,12,163,92,143,0.11199999999999999,0.627,0.261,0.9742,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,19,11,1,0,3,1,14,2,2,4,0,27,32,18,0,3,8,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,1,6,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,4,5,17,8,14,25,3,17,0,1,1,0,3,5,0,1,11,84,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436094926593627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221200746635914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808538859443736,0.0,0.10946986787595564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3661861072574243,0.0,0.0,0.15469165657258074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433794498928319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3632027374085725,0.1282914800560426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18764553344635307,0.0,0.1020590484347774,0.3012451753279624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407364243071739,0.0,0.18013266902563027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15961832337346726,0.0,0.0,0.09869208091704447,0.14638108879213124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17546673956456404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15080137469294386,0.0,0.19603200754765995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201144018889338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168757388192587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449766796088772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16976047341011882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150430910250537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13824891024402486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19140762845760406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506715739849535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15509884777493926,0.0,0.0,0.10592051748427636,0.0,0.14404767370672808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275679746362581,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zuckermen87,2020/01/24,"I know I need help yet, I’m not sure I can get it. Long story short... fairly traumatic childhood, bad young adulthood environment, drug and (alcohol..mainly) abuse. Rehab mid 20’s. Sober 5 years. Work my way from regular employee to top management in no time due to sheer hard work. Father passes away (Only knew him the later half of my life and came to love him dearly.) I had what I “thought” was p.a.w.s Post Acute Withdrawal Syndrome. What I have come to believe was nothing more than panic attacks. I’ve had severe anxiety since a child. I figured...I’m still withdrawing from alcohol after 5 years!?! Fuck it !!.., stared drinking again around the time he passes. Realize that there is still something else wrong with me. Brush it aside. I have a good job (General Manager) nice apartment, a car ... the works. Job goes out of business without prior notice. Step mom wants to travel in her camper across the U.S.  was her and my fathers dream. I had saved up a little money so I said why not.. I go with her and help them keep the dream alive. Me and mom go about our travel and does not go the way we planned. (Side note) me and her particularly have a great time as traveling companions though we miss things back home and adds to anxiety and stress. I start putting on weight living in a camper and drinking starts increasing. Have such a panic attack I end up in the hospital thinking I’m having a heart attack. Mom starts giving me Xanax. It works. Now I have to take it almost everyday. (Have taken Xanax before, am familiar with the ins and outs of it.) Now I’m worried that if I go and get mental health the doctor will only see drug seeking behavior and refuse medication. I could care less about any medication, but as long as I’ve known Xanax is the only thing that can even take the edge off. I literally feel like I’m going to die. I’ve tried cbd, mindfulness exercises, and meditation. I’m at a loss. I don’t even take Advil...( hard time swallowing pills). What do I do? I feel like I’m gonna be blacklisted walking in the door? Also I have no insurance since I am currently not working. Any info would be helpful. And yes this is the long story short lol.",1.9006649741236217,4.531567224880384,3.1503359046968065,87.67020847573481,83.688995215311,6.474445854896983,21.927741431500827,7.745696148679241,1.1886867883995706,1692,56,330,32,49,546,241,418,0.107,0.778,0.115,0.7424,4,0,7,0,1,0,84.0,3,0,1,8,17,21,4,3,22,2,29,22,1,0,1,53,68,23,1,5,7,5,5,2,1,3,15,1,2,1,15,26,5,2,9,8,1,17,8,11,0,1,11,9,39,10,40,51,3,71,0,2,2,2,25,23,1,2,30,185,54,10,0.0,0.08878938744818696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017206475958545,0.07503967637772324,0.0,0.0,0.05992796671496129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019209473433254,0.0,0.11465487362440847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667107914780803,0.0,0.2557587010934141,0.07040680614482467,0.057622768650387214,0.06257017834204515,0.0,0.0,0.06376679856124857,0.08442957008499721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570921582506799,0.07640438121753043,0.0,0.0,0.06455253252758746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059831970308314435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777391039554976,0.0,0.0,0.0767023146303916,0.06557883107750763,0.0,0.0,0.14682160582230008,0.1738087955904092,0.0,0.0626011617091357,0.0,0.06637290849872132,0.0,0.0,0.09899180868699436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578190395056977,0.10707157868523257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927906038692802,0.07830412234139357,0.07188744821896458,0.2129452289086272,0.06285451785181774,0.0,0.08261951321390575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13425962580384987,0.0,0.0,0.07965568968206838,0.0,0.08880200222885919,0.15068827438704707,0.0,0.07516901838272265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487289903583617,0.06660842116413837,0.0,0.0,0.04118401667399327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052930991990429895,0.07322193493956625,0.07510765715366872,0.06617170995090409,0.19895356513537674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763455563333566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509844916795308,0.07551997314630103,0.0,0.07566611251289472,0.2632997700411069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055565647180130254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190512230562797,0.08531751673032664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17098139203060347,0.0,0.1758474140408063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176997927054872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533348253250789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128328806572805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05971595866774965,0.0,0.0,0.08465871596437799,0.0,0.12397913152769735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05769100592211755,0.0,0.0,0.1591247059589563,0.0,0.11969131737481425,0.0,0.08584133351274673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062826675976837,0.0,0.1690323616308931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957107965937527,0.04801730478164646,0.07362629689507512,0.059492475987093285,0.17478802104153718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05087804677521721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04420042943320957,0.11896474190691715,0.0,0.0912544100786572,0.0,0.0,0.06761997397990728,0.0,0.0,0.07223764846503307,0.0,0.2727791247818388,0.07610327206093233,0.0,0.05323387191423441,0.08193304183391374,0.0,0.09651535121641856
mentalhealth,dgdaa,2020/01/24,"Any good therapists? (Philippines) As the title says, are there any good therapists mainly in Manila?",5.0810416666666685,8.418326687500002,4.190000000000001,74.52166666666669,94.625,7.133333333333333,24.08333333333333,7.793537801064563,2.823608333333333,81,3,10,2,3,24,13,16,0.0,0.6940000000000001,0.306,0.7319,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160064427583359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5131012822073694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432414252570893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7102811575845219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,forgotmywaffle,2020/01/24,"Need a second opinion on therapist's advice Hey everyone, thanks for reading my post. 

I've been using the BetterHelp service to try to get help for my depression and childhood abuse, but have had one bad experience after another (some re-traumatizing), which is why I'm hoping for a second opinion here. 

Short story is that I am mid-30s, living with my narcissistic mother, and trying to put myself in a mentally healthy place where I have the emotional resources to do the significant work I need to move out. This is my first full session with this therapist, and she advised me to intentionally interact once daily with my mother, so that she will be less lonely, and hopefully be less inclined to invade my privacy & cross my boundaries.

I did not feel heard when I told the therapist 1. I had done this previously to poor effect, 2. That I was afraid of being hurt / not being resilient enough to handle what she would say to me. Growing up & working with various therapists, I have often struggled to be believed about her behavior, its severity, regularity, and that I am not exaggerating, which is hard in concert with her consistent gas-lighting about past & current behaviors. 

I don't want to have a ""no this won't work"" attitude, especially since I'm not the expert, but after my previous experiences on the site, I am cautious & uncertain about therapists (without specific training in this context) connecting with, validating, or speaking to my experience. 

**Is this something you, having had experience with victims of narcissistic abuse, would recommend to a client/patient/advisee?**",9.515744680851064,9.522595255319152,9.609375886524823,59.65300000000002,59.21276595744681,13.051914893617024,42.91347517730496,12.340626583579946,5.833962836879432,1290,68,193,39,15,427,169,282,0.14300000000000002,0.763,0.094,-0.9498,1,2,1,0,2,0,55.0,0,1,0,5,8,11,1,3,11,0,31,0,0,3,0,37,44,10,0,7,8,2,2,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,14,13,0,0,2,2,1,4,8,8,0,4,9,6,29,3,39,26,6,24,0,3,0,0,16,12,0,8,7,152,43,7,0.0,0.21702650302615328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949580418194078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.396929246466625,0.0,0.0,0.0960348602470174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646965132641029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318493501400222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888202819147089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372325488113924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302080046735357,0.0,0.09463178948379312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751339438829328,0.0,0.3583508237310678,0.0,0.0,0.04630812893222585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779021560825611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04784938361637425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204217284079376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06138749644366812,0.0,0.0,0.1819291441820042,0.0,0.0,0.0980436390579747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087123485498758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922961411921836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734036333164707,0.0,0.1358182373194754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975350383286994,0.0620603677271842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742824765605745,0.0,0.0,0.09568683442181844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771311567182548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920682231553442,0.0,0.0,0.09160978639929293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07283206969988999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346498384818233,0.0,0.07576006023066975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705066091296361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574452953220176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431916518990633,0.0,0.5316862323208117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751339438829328,0.0,0.12436040938867765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910003642865754,0.0,0.0,0.054019207181384886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264121934697735,0.0,0.0,0.0882846738994978,0.0,0.2000249171146164,0.0,0.0,0.1301187157173519,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dem0n0cracy,2020/01/24,"The Carnivore Diet for Mental Health? How plant-free diets affect the brain by Dr Georgia Ede  [https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/diagnosis-diet/201904/the-carnivore-diet-mental-health](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/diagnosis-diet/201904/the-carnivore-diet-mental-health) 

> I recently had the pleasure of participating in the [Boulder Carnivore Conference](https://carnivorycon.com/speakers/), the world's first meeting dedicated to the potential benefits of plant-free diets. For this special event, I created a new presentation exploring the nutritional differences between plant and animal foods, and summarizing the scientific arguments in support of all-meat diets for optimal brain health. Skeptical? You should be. This seemingly strange and extreme way of eating flies in the face of every piece of conventional [nutrition](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/diet) advice we've been given, yet a growing number of people report  remarkable benefits, including resolution of serious, chronic [psychiatric](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/psychiatry) symptoms. If you are curious about how this diet might help to correct chemical imbalances in the brain, please watch this video to learn more.",20.94703947368421,23.684878046052642,15.963421052631581,14.453947368421067,34.986842105263165,16.54736842105263,49.26315789473684,14.90622815163357,8.64055,1061,46,89,34,8,311,106,152,0.05,0.726,0.22399999999999998,0.9785,0,0,0,0,0,0,87.0,0,2,0,1,4,7,1,0,12,0,6,16,4,3,1,13,9,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,4,3,7,0,3,1,0,2,0,2,0,1,3,1,4,5,21,3,2,14,1,0,1,0,4,5,0,3,6,57,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116743284200482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3827270567133967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939959722551095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693826329611387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628689372780512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720758467411232,0.13818935790819156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.485902557878445,0.0,0.0,0.07660032223184468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3455059042470364,0.1212343612562999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037355678511132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922823902002282,0.0,0.0,0.12544650971871166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283896108523493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403737053053486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968502395463485,0.0,0.11878199068377812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5498651574579255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071114791146688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Oso_Furioso,2020/01/24,"Right or left Every night that I drive home from work, I face a choice. Right or left? 

Right takes me north. From there, I’ll swing left—west. And then north again. And then west again. And that takes me home.

Left takes me south.  It’s a more complicated trip, but it ends at the sea. It ends with a drive into the waves. Into Mother Ocean.

Today was the first time in a long time that I’ve thought of turning left.",-0.2119803921568604,2.088903164705883,0.22191176470588306,106.08776960784316,93.8235294117647,3.3039215686274512,10.612745098039216,4.7782277997778095,-2.005960784313725,319,3,78,1,12,94,50,85,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,7,0,1,1,1,0,0,10,6,8,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,6,6,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,5,0,8,4,1,30,0,0,0,0,1,15,0,2,12,40,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366601682520077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256389406849496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364022495983014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680237003345442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7257848053088058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823193444501562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537469665240344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3422814112893306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3013520730703857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606360106326568,0.15580665140251676,0.0,0.12663732700669353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14531860613715944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726250517972866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,richarcad,2020/01/24,"Feel defeated on the social front and it sometimes becomes unbearable So basically all my life I have had trouble socializing with people and establishing lasting relationships. I am currently 23, turning 24 in February. My struggle has been ongoing since high school (2010-2014). 

High school was for the most part, not a good time for me. I couldnt really relate to anyone so I just kept to myself. I was overweight, had anxiety and was shy. People ignored me and I felt worthless. Never have I felt included in anything. I did make a few 'friends' but even they turned out to be illegitimate and gave off red flags that I was totally obvious too because I was just focused on having 'friends' to feel included. During our final year in hs, my 'friends' purposely let me be the last one picked. They excluded me on purpose. 😔 then after that, I tried to ask a girl I liked to prom but I just ended up making her uncomfortable. At this point I just wanted to gtfo of this place and couldnt wait for university where I was optimistic. Sadly, it was just more of the same. 

University was ultimately worse than highschool because the people I did engage with were extremely fake and only pretended to be my friend to use me for rides. I ended up dropping out back in 2017-2018 when I realized I was in another environment surrounded by people who weren't building me up. 

Since the beginning of 2019, I have been working to pay off uni debt (less than 5k) and have been going to the gym. I have lost close to 80 lbs since I started and I'm honestly proud of that. I no longer talk to my highschool 'friends' and dont have any friends or any social life at all. I have found that at this point I don't exist to anyone even if I'm nice, friendly, confident, etc. 

So would it be a good idea to take a break from chasing a social life until someone can change my perspective? Like ive said, ive changed since hs and university. I have become mentally strong and dont need people or women holding my hand to get through life. I enjoy my own company and know my self worth. I just don't see the point in chasing people, friends or women who deem me as irrelevant to them. I see it as a waste of time. Chasing self improvement and bettering my financial situation seems more productive, don't you agree?",4.997244927747772,6.2154957307692325,5.962047876222452,77.71283827178516,69.06787330316742,9.50413078382718,31.22639030798424,9.778596075983213,3.02564521967596,1811,75,341,42,31,599,231,442,0.131,0.742,0.128,0.8502,2,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,1,1,3,6,15,27,0,1,15,0,45,6,1,4,5,61,74,28,0,6,13,0,5,2,8,1,5,1,0,5,13,19,1,4,9,2,3,3,11,8,0,1,25,9,55,19,56,41,12,50,0,4,3,0,30,28,0,6,19,234,68,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871474396392843,0.07610720330062545,0.0555240448066305,0.0,0.0,0.1015002406178533,0.0,0.059727740395619976,0.0,0.0678531665639039,0.0,0.0,0.05581008617055565,0.0,0.08848905480043735,0.16031938455685807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419174015469646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535615355242094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17012810411088156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856993266598796,0.0,0.08094667795894311,0.09587774941048742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339797598603673,0.0,0.1393777283507101,0.0795086205443912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958100269725328,0.4486054145896097,0.0,0.03792042553437374,0.0,0.04124929035293525,0.12175451265808293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15337101102551898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193478750601202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03988846029545511,0.1183259324159617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421869389465079,0.2050636089357038,0.07091853783260642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923041927017213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689637560319267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314428493475011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053817677107136426,0.05597871833222125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049182567781901616,0.055200900883968056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859783644268298,0.0,0.3019099550353268,0.0,0.07583139436870058,0.0,0.20583669450790934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04649706162824218,0.0,0.0,0.07792452041492383,0.0,0.0,0.06904087642172138,0.0,0.0,0.14691110768177898,0.11567485829169902,0.06607475282251613,0.1514350204587531,0.0,0.0,0.2401580547402228,0.08158375952092121,0.0,0.2959475758617145,0.061497400402757224,0.0,0.07178417848607037,0.0,0.051373000403802514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587711748928515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545716614524924,0.058337625724492415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464479184517225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04927753804997625,0.1578939417154015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06268643009505175,0.0,0.0,0.04280998350512986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05283962161544238,0.0,0.07396594465817635,0.051559254237704535,0.0,0.0,0.04673959785628564
mentalhealth,stuckforever_243,2020/01/24,Sudden Rush of Sadness Does anyone else get randomly hit with like extreme sadness (like i just wanna lay in bed and cry the whole day?). There isn’t even a reason for me feeling like this? Like il be having a great month and will come home from a fun day with my bf and a few hours later il feel like death.,6.899166666666666,4.8617335,6.742500000000002,84.7191666666667,65.5625,9.158333333333333,29.14583333333333,6.42735559955562,1.2995895833333329,240,5,53,1,3,76,51,64,0.162,0.594,0.244,0.6662,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,9,0,0,5,0,4,0,0,1,0,12,9,3,1,1,1,0,2,5,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,2,3,7,7,6,2,9,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,11,28,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14745082271721452,0.21606946358779988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18165275163889744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23163961542949896,0.27199776950462945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845407863649763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17616153596136966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392829509052872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21325253770907496,0.3013026155431011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017506773962824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23249377408947225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115278594434838,0.0,0.20767238278984404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5151217714197416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683208327741394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21681773797144366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354377911756405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chasindamian,2020/01/24,"Religious trauma? Not sure if that's the term but advice would be appreciated I was raised very strictly Christian as a child and i grew up always talking to god, I never doubted his existence. I remember feeling very in tune with the Lord and his word and his creation. But as I grew up I also came to realize that I am transgender. It was instilled in me from a very young age that god despised lgbt+ people and that they're morally wrong, they'll burn in hell, etc. My family disowned me when I eventually came out, they did not take it well. 
I tried very hard not to believe in the christian god after that. I got into other religions, I tried atheism, but ultimately there is always still that thought of ""what if I'm wrong"", there is always still that conversation going in my mind with god.  
I don't really know how to not believe in god. I dont know if i want to. I don't know how to not let it affect me.  I find myself remorseful and repentant often. I loathe myself for being transgender. I feel like when people look at me, they know that I am trans and they are judging me for it, hating me. And I really do not want people to hate me. It shouldn't matter what they think but it makes me very anxious in public settings nonetheless. I don't leave my house and it's very depressing as im happy with my gender, I'm happy with how my transition is coming, but I feel like I am still stuck and can't even show people who I am. 
I feel as though if god in heaven doesn't even love me, how could anyone else, including myself? It's impairing my life. 
There are other factors and events that also contributed to my mental health but it is difficult to sum up ones entire life in one text post. I feel this is probably the most prominent thing I need advice on in my life at the moment. Any kind words, resources, etc. Are really greatly appreciated.",3.0976878814298203,4.89005296756757,4.596190061028771,83.36859197907586,74.72972972972974,7.6931124673060145,23.82737576285963,8.460557738077197,1.5385588491717532,1458,44,287,27,31,487,175,370,0.14400000000000002,0.705,0.152,0.6478,0,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,5,0,19,20,4,1,7,0,29,5,0,6,2,70,57,33,0,10,16,0,6,2,0,3,4,0,0,1,25,19,0,0,14,1,0,6,14,10,1,2,8,7,55,10,40,42,4,38,6,1,1,1,14,18,1,7,14,206,80,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16418724735375162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343655725320033,0.20970921093932965,0.0,0.0,0.05712969750803819,0.0,0.0,0.09490741521802724,0.0,0.058741762482917,0.08607819797809803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18930105833658065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19217017507669226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723671973781036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707516863063727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723577110280444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845912307711872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017959556532546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18738676879979893,0.11097565777153136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919717442775721,0.0,0.21238996311010927,0.120033556622863,0.0,0.0,0.07678364045203942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047744832953130964,0.0,0.06719049107978169,0.09262134862762153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17886046654807186,0.07525648072990218,0.16588501315187607,0.0,0.08929872759132554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09693628890775906,0.0,0.0,0.09074524268680736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874835127388695,0.1846788497226674,0.0,0.0,0.08895448588910579,0.0,0.08590594193695036,0.17801629439495295,0.08208610895186343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054726214127295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582232711019024,0.0,0.05607734372343047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846623453592906,0.0,0.08482617621104656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622923687030879,0.06479370997256655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385473363838552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329678926468001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045838098566563,0.0,0.09057701542826103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145691874385565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516698101886087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20127154233352604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917845390331013,0.0,0.06316508327127282,0.06752407547539703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05581252735344998,0.05383023154378845,0.08253942256018702,0.066694575467355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140745841883436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.415902410880948,0.09910257818693707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553510125233306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05967831106195121,0.18370354742160733,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sarahthepineapple,2020/01/24,"Can you get vitamin d withdrawal? My family and I went to Cuba over the winter break, obviously we spent a lot of time in the sun. When we got back home to Canada where we spend a lot less time in the sun, I noticed some signs of depression sneak back up on me. Can you get vitamin d withdrawal or does it stockpile up?",4.518181818181817,4.500013090909093,6.2207575757575775,79.85113636363639,69.60606060606061,10.842424242424245,28.62121212121212,10.686352973137794,2.8327393939393937,248,8,54,7,4,86,46,66,0.055999999999999994,0.838,0.106,-0.1179,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,3,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,10,7,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,9,0,10,4,4,15,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,4,6,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4124041643016359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23096984151248595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346727141009732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528017894143461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802099490524782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21447578779583606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689910336969962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4559680338151013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053072597130819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127379568696215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485913402233325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wanderinsoul97,2020/01/24,"Please help me I moved out of my country to halfway across the world to study roughly a month ago, now normally I would travel very often within my country for long periods and never really feel homesick but ever since I moved out I randomly end up thinking about my parents or a friend from back home and I burst out into tears.
I've been crying continuously for the past 20 minutes because I thought of my best friend and it's not stopping. What do I do.",5.171666666666667,6.072773055555558,5.862222222222222,79.75000000000001,68.44444444444444,8.222222222222221,31.66666666666667,8.344100000000001,2.3990000000000005,365,15,68,5,6,119,67,90,0.067,0.718,0.215,0.925,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,2,20,7,5,0,2,3,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,7,0,1,3,1,0,3,2,1,0,0,2,2,12,3,15,4,1,23,0,1,0,0,4,8,0,3,12,49,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17864829555426315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549676956522929,0.0,0.12285364397186628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21149816754590905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213763351070428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784998694907072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18229961699520714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190196776742587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114103208138855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508441883024191,0.0,0.2021556727669853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17835181157816232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608630242828451,0.4283988489886174,0.0,0.0,0.15543593606006295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19746115413740048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22378036406898044,0.0,0.19238761487532785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212245114106013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291082488765776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667115341019864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849198042737756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913525760264866,0.0,0.15999598992380706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16628718171431572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316442361959966,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Abby4373,2020/01/24,"I need severe help, boyfriend is scared of me I won’t go into all the details, but let’s just say that I had a very large and bad mental breakdown and fit today. It was over something my boyfriend did. During this outbreak, I couldn’t stop myself. I knew that it was wrong, but my body and brain wouldn’t stop. I didn’t throw anything, hit him, or do anything like that. Most of our fights happen over text. After it was done, I felt so horrible and he told me that I ruined his night. I kept apologizing because I literally barely remember it happening. It felt like something possessed me. My boyfriend basically said he’s scared and mortified of me. That shattered any hope that I had left in me. I feel worthless and ashamed of myself right now. When I tell my parents this, they just go to their favorite phrase “maybe if you actually didn’t spend all the time in your room, you’d be a happier person”. Now, I go to school and have a job. That takes up most of my week. I spend the time in my room to wind down at night.

Reddit, what do I do? I’m scared of myself and my boyfriend is scared of me as well.",1.7700363636363647,3.8848453511111103,2.7684141414141443,93.4303181818182,79.93333333333334,5.690909090909091,22.227272727272727,6.782984794422108,0.4186000000000001,864,27,189,9,22,274,126,225,0.225,0.6709999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.9866,2,0,2,0,1,0,29.0,1,3,2,0,7,14,1,5,6,0,21,2,2,0,2,31,38,15,0,5,6,1,3,2,0,2,0,2,2,1,15,9,0,3,5,0,2,4,5,10,1,0,15,5,40,4,21,16,4,30,0,2,0,0,19,14,0,5,14,125,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.11897580831929973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290941530571183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20065865887437093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179765861944384,0.07432097273270774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542503807714645,0.0,0.13610244135220873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476593968460052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06164614351680488,0.0,0.2341236070757233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20786892054466105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21562595611100768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172004577084559,0.0,0.0,0.12109353574344735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098625406299418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246585275248005,0.12467091071638975,0.0,0.11912738198836753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248448718439195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12286614245001748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040173661788027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288263130361049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537713492564182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645537201391923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381109842490128,0.10411855482992664,0.11597332812635353,0.0969552500796656,0.4882506039929652,0.12338900503314475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773428964499454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18771911737786104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20386025970691968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166826274585092,0.0,0.1065629840546594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218443808396689,0.0,0.11556539479425225,0.11649927117545847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059632501270067,0.0,0.0,0.09779643875973992,0.0,0.10962023873848667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13329979302067535,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mikrobku,2020/01/24,"Will medication help me? Hi, I am looking for some advice I guess. I have been struggling with depression and anxiety (what I now recognize as depression) since possibly middle school. My home life is not great. I am a grad student and live with my boyfriend currently. 

Just to give some context, I was an anxious child, and was bullied for being overweight. Around this time I was starting to understand I was gay, and already boys at school would call each other “faggots” and I just went along with it. Honestly, I love being gay, but I still seriously struggle with body image issues. I don’t know what I look like. My boyfriend tells me I look muscular but I don’t see it. I feel uncomfortable when anyone talks about my body. I don’t even like to be touched. Sometimes it causes me physical discomfort. I don’t have much of a sex drive anymore. It’s also caused me to have unhealthy quirks with food. Anyway, it breaks my heart because my boyfriend is very affectionate and his love language involves a lot of physical affection and affirmation, and sometimes I just can’t. 

 I have days, sometimes weeks, where I am not myself. I cant engaged with my boyfriend, I get short and standoffish, and I can’t even fold me laundry. I just kind of shut down, and get argumentative. I realized my parents really fucked up my communication, and sometimes I argue with my boyfriend about literally anything. I have trouble even remembering what we were arguing about when I get really worked up. It’s ruining my relationship. Only now (last couple of days) I suddenly feel much better. I have a lot of energy, and feel almost optimistic. It’s like the flick of a switch. 

I have a difficult time opening up. I don’t know why. I think about sharing my struggles and daily anxieties, but I feel trapped. My boyfriend has assured me that I can talk to him, and that he wants to know what I’m dealing with, but I can’t talk about anything. I somehow managed to tell him I made a therapy appointment, but when he started asking follow up questions, I had a panic attack, and snapped at him, which I feel extremely guilty about now. I become such a nasty person, and I don’t have a say in it. My father has been an alcoholic for since I can remember and I’ve been in denial until just this past year. I think he might be dependent on oxycontin now. Over the holidays it was really tough. I stayed with my parents with my twin sister, and she had a big meltdown (a whole other history). 

On top of this, I can’t focus. I have a hard time staying on top of my grad school work. I have a short attention span, I can’t help but daydream in the middle of class and miss parts of my lectures, and sometimes I get to the grocery store and can’t even remember everything I am suppose to buy, and have to go back out. My dad has undiagnosed (?) ADHD, my mom just told me that I was recommended (as was my sister) to see a specialist when we were younger, and I never saw someone. I can’t help but think I might have ADHD or something. I lack motivation, I find little tasks to be so incredibly dense and burdensome, and I’m just miserable. I’m often paralyzed with indecision, and it puts a strain on my relationships, and causes me incredibly anxiety. 

I’m sorry this is so long. It’s impossible to convey my situation completely on here. I just feel broken. I feel miserable most of the time. Can medication help me? I have my first therapy session on Tuesday. It was an exhausting, and heartbreaking process that took months to finally arrange, but my boyfriend told me I needed to get help or he was going to leave me. I’m worried my relationship won’t last. My boyfriend is amazing. He is really trying, but I’m not sure if I can be helped. I know there are other people on here who are truly suffering and I’m sorry if my troubles seem undeserving of this attention.",3.8604352001396833,5.8489615250338325,5.1538122571915,79.34199692260688,73.12719891745601,8.719027456458162,29.781330481470164,9.327941345949908,2.837131284647956,3033,132,567,73,62,1008,316,739,0.18600000000000005,0.706,0.10800000000000001,-0.9953,3,1,2,0,0,0,101.0,2,0,0,7,40,40,4,9,24,0,72,17,4,7,3,122,125,53,0,6,24,7,9,3,0,5,6,1,1,3,30,48,3,0,25,1,2,7,19,25,0,1,22,16,111,15,72,92,11,74,0,8,6,6,52,32,1,19,35,401,141,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13950320613233988,0.056715042133582715,0.0,0.06202604355050175,0.058117677911018836,0.0,0.0640474831774316,0.04641376982852136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133199035587994,0.0655675533835162,0.05755909555261631,0.040582220457616086,0.0,0.0955223086532847,0.051667017762661686,0.054258633230458465,0.06602774483490992,0.0,0.0446284108677011,0.0,0.03538003760520908,0.06409951905642437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05133078177270226,0.0,0.12893649702589813,0.0,0.0,0.059264311338114314,0.0,0.0,0.17886613135948193,0.0,0.0,0.06085279053618576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421905303607918,0.0,0.07486071113476417,0.05983566373570255,0.0999778166888519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333685673537525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216171363039635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20542384699125124,0.0,0.0,0.06357889099714865,0.053046597389194566,0.0493679464071561,0.07018099295566323,0.0,0.0,0.05365612315914507,0.1516149183011776,0.05567630036681656,0.06596980596826645,0.0,0.0,0.06398820583874998,0.06393650531501623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199154677616965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877649814761905,0.2334139223018687,0.0,0.05821785234339622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605776402539705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604386904701394,0.12758687306128766,0.0946190678155478,0.0,0.06145492413673194,0.0,0.0,0.04099466432298942,0.08506477578778444,0.058170328522418775,0.051249503081408236,0.05136269138290738,0.1462144353804995,0.0,0.0,0.09868536992150566,0.104764932624896,0.05491790807933715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169363792671531,0.0,0.12314042097171304,0.0,0.06797457899590631,0.0463261785683626,0.0,0.08533069069733877,0.043035185406140784,0.04476325719947923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044141277212660576,0.0,0.06809626496299151,0.1288908890302187,0.06285058452260589,0.05540479573096198,0.04023693697345287,0.050677418858263164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06543025550067967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834522861880837,0.06501696634757845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487250862967339,0.0,0.0,0.18693650659048028,0.19724062953250665,0.0,0.0,0.04615494479839331,0.0,0.1762157091448073,0.09249914230787593,0.05283652865063627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960209262836532,0.06523827124911863,0.0,0.0,0.04917625900240483,0.04468126013320151,0.2870102907104008,0.12993982454597575,0.08216061027108952,0.1237237099879856,0.04635002286603706,0.0,0.0,0.18202490304817956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05470107358000679,0.0,0.0,0.13994865669562695,0.1014572938041734,0.0,0.1327453164407778,0.0,0.0,0.11156714906689304,0.0,0.0,0.13537203783320276,0.0,0.0,0.11091750938166182,0.06448346800148985,0.03940467334027088,0.0,0.0,0.06042064910638729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04788825591257189,0.03423290778064428,0.0,0.04655538744654245,0.0,0.0,0.053802737362879466,0.05237117292902379,0.06479847429449813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450617102942003,0.058941424951626374,0.0,0.041229242598204506,0.0,0.0,0.037375215127725896
mentalhealth,helpmeplease1127389,2020/01/24,"I’m so lost. I don’t know what to do anymore. My girlfriend and her sisters got taken by dcs and I don’t know what to do. Throwaway. So, a bit of back story. I’ve (17) lived with my girlfriend (16) and her family for nearly half a year. During that time me and her basically raised her little sisters (9&11). Got them up for school, made breakfast lunch and dinner, took them to the bus stop, hell even when the 11 year old started her period for the first time I helped her with that too. They are like my sisters to me. Forward, around October, a big dcs (child services) case opened up on her parents because they’re very neglectful and abusive. During this time I was kicked out, and there is where our communication was cut. Forward to December 1st, her mom got caught with meth and the kids were taken instantly. The two little girls were placed together, and my girlfriend, was put in a girls home. They put me on all their no contact list because they’re “obsessed” with me. Anyways, my girlfriend decided to run from the facility, twice. Against my wishes, but when she ran of course I was going to help her, I know what abandonment and separation issues feel like, my parents left me at 6 years old. So I helped her. Flash forward to the day before Christmas, she got taken for the last time. At this point, dcs hates me and refused to contact me at all. They blame me for her running, but all she wanted was to be with her sisters. This time, they finally placed her with her sisters. On NYE, I was contacted by her foster mom and she asked me if I wanted to come over and see the girls (first time I’ve seen the little ones since October and since Christmas for my gf. I spent 2 hours with them that day. That was the last time I talked to any of the girls. I’ve had contact with her foster mom, and she’s been trying to help although there’s little she can do. She believes dcs is overreacting and wants the no contact lifted. They had court today, and I had planned on coming since the last court date (I’ve been at every one.) and I got there 3 hours early, and I was texted her foster mom, and she said “I believe it’s best if you don’t come today” and I was confused and asked why. She said “*girlfriends name* specifically asked if I made sure you wouldn’t come” and “dcs isn’t allowing you guys contact, not yesterday, and not today at court either” and to me that made no sense. She’s always wanted me at court, I’ve always been her emotional support the entire time we’ve been together. I have no idea why she wouldn’t want me there. I left, crying, before I got to see her. I seen my therapist and he said that she’s probably being forced by dcs to follow her therapy goals, and one of her goals were probably to avoid seeing me to make sure she can be independent. Which is the only logical decision I think she would ever say that, unless her foster mom was lying, which I find hard to believe considering she’s been helping me so much and is the only person who wants me with the girls. I’m just so confused. I don’t know what to do. I’ve done everything I’ve had to to prove myself as a good influence. I stopped smoking weed so I can pass a drug test, I work full time, I only need 1 credit in my school. I’m doing everything I can to no avail. I miss them so much, they’re like my family. They’re the only family I have. I’ve been extremely depressed over all of this. I don’t know how to go about getting my contact back because no one tells me anything. Should I get a lawyer or something? How do I go about getting the ones I love, and the ones who love me, back. My girlfriend is almost 17 so it won’t be very long until she’s 18, but I’m still worried she’s gonna change and things won’t be the same. I’m worried I will lose her. I’m worried I will lose my sisters. All of this separation from them and being uninformed by everyone is literally killing me and I have no clue what to do.",3.2300858900772202,4.586500760705288,4.273547095015896,87.60698785976793,73.5088161209068,7.221670727175125,25.107073543378625,7.755146713633716,1.1920714621959785,3060,96,644,40,61,995,295,794,0.124,0.8059999999999999,0.07,-0.9896,2,1,3,0,0,0,102.0,1,3,11,10,29,26,4,4,29,0,65,6,0,9,9,113,133,55,1,15,12,13,2,3,7,9,1,4,1,9,24,48,3,6,13,0,2,19,19,15,0,11,46,11,126,11,77,72,12,94,1,7,5,2,112,35,1,7,49,418,150,9,0.0,0.060146882858051975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05083268118535952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447920991652781,0.05500262999511617,0.0,0.03452117114907438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050344116604649415,0.0,0.0,0.041774338173801336,0.045190605270719886,0.1423720924696988,0.0,0.0,0.11710284355753507,0.0,0.09283554866034886,0.0,0.0863926258199393,0.17158048752013474,0.053273547803160015,0.0,0.055420996357214126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370144151600082,0.1749143100865789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05576172553955318,0.06547699080904401,0.0,0.04372284530305688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05194906201600558,0.0,0.0,0.058869970660490864,0.0,0.0,0.0571025191048298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03352905618634787,0.045918825080996685,0.042770748393442526,0.04850705151111308,0.09124658294557376,0.0,0.14356697123553108,0.0,0.02566773704985246,0.0362657175913363,0.0,0.055609336304264685,0.04639725587766141,0.08635944073103068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795660778128255,0.0,0.08655082847027658,0.04257832417797376,0.2436030166442745,0.0,0.0,0.0502642106105211,0.0,0.0,0.04547445487504005,0.05011881017991246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17012975401909528,0.0,0.050920298846060974,0.0,0.0999843691658762,0.0,0.0,0.057306228208253165,0.0,0.05298428954278055,0.0,0.0,0.05616269888003066,0.0,0.139492471888053,0.12413798385977193,0.0,0.0,0.11031018268347176,0.0,0.0,0.07440198547410844,0.2035149283668896,0.0448254256653878,0.04492442591885331,0.0,0.11358356726167923,0.05541475880924091,0.0,0.09163274602403414,0.1441019985539312,0.03388527621714851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297270144558961,0.0,0.0,0.0746345681977421,0.03764076505005087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653628056633738,0.0,0.2063934652643648,0.15443283712065395,0.0,0.0,0.11273453629379188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044325051666088786,0.10607487547884192,0.0,0.04798826378940782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946407168815847,0.0,0.0,0.1020634172482824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14486419042573315,0.04036946551196896,0.0,0.10275148956139704,0.12135669162628356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597718908452218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03908050584520213,0.0,0.0,0.03593092719825472,0.0,0.040540090725763166,0.0848817337559067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05760623606408341,0.09568869004183626,0.0,0.0,0.04080207436493466,0.04436985832239428,0.0,0.05805290741153622,0.058940763615004436,0.033725258369515294,0.03252743699292232,0.0,0.0,0.2664073780619279,0.0,0.14435463419537184,0.0,0.0564005254247193,0.03446533428582591,0.0,0.049588922961272486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377101538893883,0.17965106829549152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161299048734578,0.0,0.058375943166619836,0.0,0.0,0.03695670065062538,0.1546595169079576,0.0,0.036061195488868984,0.0,0.0,0.0980708003026584
mentalhealth,brpsw,2020/01/24,"[Research Study Survey] Social media and Mental Health Hello, r/mentalhealth! **I am recruiting mental health professionals 18+ years old (i.e., those who do therapy with clients, LCSW, LMFT, MSW,MFT,PCC, etc.) who also conduct intake assessments. Please see below for more information and a link to the brief, anonymous survey.** 

Hello, my name is Bobbie Parrell and my research partner Sarah Koehler are MSW students in our last year at the University of San Bernardino, California conducting our final project. My faculty advisor is Dr. Rigaud, Joseph. **I am seeking mental health professionals to provide their perceptions on the relationship between social media as it relates to mental health.** You do not have to be in this study if you do not want to. This study is completely voluntary. If you choose to be in this study, you will complete an informed consent and then a survey that will take approximately 10-15 minutes. This study is anonymous which means that you will not be identified by your answers on the survey and there will be no use of personal information. There are no anticipated conflicts of interest involved in this study. If you would like to take part in this study, please click on the link below and complete the survey. 

If you have any questions about this study, please feel free to contact Dr. Riguard at (909) 537-5507

Thank you so much r/mentalhealth for the opportunity to post!

Bobbie and Sarah

[http://csusb.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_4Gk5nPBwwgu3AXP](http://csusb.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_4Gk5nPBwwgu3AXP)",6.3965126050420205,10.003778039215687,5.22217787114846,73.84301470588234,72.52941176470588,7.721288515406162,30.283613445378148,8.634040054169528,3.0333613445378145,1260,54,182,26,28,373,146,255,0.032,0.877,0.091,0.9356,0,0,0,0,0,0,75.0,2,9,1,1,5,5,0,0,10,0,22,6,0,1,0,31,30,15,0,6,7,0,1,1,1,5,6,0,0,2,14,8,0,1,11,0,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,3,17,6,31,21,4,20,0,0,2,0,28,12,0,5,7,119,31,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922884245333018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587682889732777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3509620580051773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443890318030247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05641716162823394,0.0,0.0,0.12222818506450893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4744085524515682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909509174366439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05451134799822459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154109250316195,0.0,0.0,0.4497773013392565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202262803470765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708228404218606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082804144517333,0.0,0.0,0.0974255579745362,0.0,0.3674372327587759,0.0,0.0,0.10686082849548424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499283442080115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11979295624957625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891317626806709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274793275505407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677854574666874,0.0,0.0,0.10272598095766013,0.12759910443466094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636751997745346,0.0,0.0,0.0658115629556437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926177093257065,0.0,0.0,0.14370507694644724
mentalhealth,Opti-Free31,2020/01/24,"I will be taking my life in a couple days or weeks Hey I can’t live like this any longer. For the past 9-10 years I have been suffering with these thoughts that just don’t go away. I can’t even choose a what to wear in the morning because I have thoughts that If you wear this shirt your going to become an evil person in the future. If you wear these socks your going to become an evil person in the future. As soon as I start to get those thoughts I try to block them. I’ve struggling with that my for all these years. I have gone to psychologists. Nothing helps. Look I just not going to live like this any longer. What sucks is that I feel normal like I’m conscious of how ridiculous all of this is. But when I start to have these thoughts I become fearful I get anxiety I’m constantly fighting with my mind I’m tired. It’s hard for me to build relationships. Lately I’ve been struggling at work. I have it all. But my mind is not good anymore. 

I just want to say I’ve enjoyed sharing this world with you all. I believe that people are good caring human beings. And that there is good in this world. I love you all.",1.2485488505747109,3.4159818146551717,2.1670689655172417,96.74316091954023,82.14655172413794,4.728735632183908,19.149425287356323,5.7366,-0.3743798850574716,879,22,196,5,24,275,114,232,0.18899999999999997,0.72,0.091,-0.9690000000000001,0,0,0,0,3,0,20.0,0,6,1,1,8,19,5,3,8,0,18,7,4,1,5,33,41,10,0,4,10,0,2,3,0,1,2,1,0,3,21,5,0,1,7,0,0,5,5,9,0,0,7,4,29,10,28,31,5,27,0,1,1,1,17,9,1,3,16,125,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15273067959738654,0.0,0.08590636775000089,0.0,0.1113677619677794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055060773185085,0.0,0.0,0.06845478666054039,0.3720673463674949,0.0,0.1265194835146052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449356949423425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135241424530198,0.0,0.0,0.12425372816674116,0.0,0.07242182819545845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417065190931647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636456599434415,0.056780387119863086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734037145663505,0.0,0.2552823173330958,0.2825664442149496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005954341379838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526984770842382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667512596740876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931820287374518,0.16458691038875944,0.0,0.1983193934977603,0.0,0.0943006156216352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135180171893378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267745166782644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100265384339376,0.10775133554516507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719953195231796,0.07785212008892234,0.1961056082053732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056420836811042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930253084405565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158967808648659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23479296515754405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443284767514862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566028976489887,0.0,0.1290680858383035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624182136367702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662352715687598,0.0,0.09007732414288457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175304918933114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14463028030154396
mentalhealth,starth1ng,2020/01/24,pls someone just talk help me fast yesterday i rly overdid my meds in a crises (xanax & ambien) & now im just scared of taking them im rly anxious idk what to do if i should take them like i regularly do or idk pls can someone just talk to me im so freaking alone i dont have any friends available rn or anyone for that matter pls anyone,-0.5448648648648664,1.6544253243243254,1.8068108108108087,95.28886486486488,93.05405405405406,4.581621621621622,19.56216216216216,6.2581,0.02863135135135142,270,9,61,3,10,91,50,74,0.20600000000000002,0.664,0.13,-0.7875,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,0,5,4,0,1,1,0,6,1,0,0,0,8,8,4,0,2,6,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,9,2,5,7,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,3,4,31,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814628779258172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796760706064365,0.0,0.11914759908550406,0.0,0.0,0.19793541978841975,0.0,0.2450193251909217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20534273126603303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353654376711966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11743837795564535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5677648368281607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559788714538114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19461683674234465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17541399551336995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29690671580593503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634695559782785,0.2816514640999084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IamMiclovin,2020/01/24,"Age regression and PTSD questions     So im writing a book about a character who will often regress due to PTSD. I want to educate myself as well as present this issue respectfully.

     I came here to ask some questions about things involving PTSD and age regression. i want to portray it as accurately and as respectfully as possible. Is regression an automatic response to a trigger? Or is it something that you do consciously? Do people remember what happened while they were regressing or is it like a gap in memory, similar to split personality disorder? Lastly, How might somebody act while they are regressing?

     Any extra info about PTSD itself is greatly appreciated too. Also any myths that could be debunked would be very helpful. It is important to me that i get this right and treat it with the respect it deserves, so thank you so much for sharing!",6.222280701754388,8.477420526315793,6.894736842105267,68.1914912280702,67.42105263157895,10.592982456140351,37.00877192982456,10.686352973137794,4.771485087719299,688,37,107,21,12,226,99,152,0.016,0.7759999999999999,0.207,0.9813,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,2,0,12,9,0,0,6,0,15,0,0,2,0,23,22,18,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,15,6,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,10,9,18,14,3,11,0,0,0,0,13,2,0,7,8,84,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11215265789235836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19074074703434446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311087195219199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16040117640519494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197300467293964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16073117477281945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327142839908181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546189285010241,0.0,0.0,0.12401684355436204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094002246430859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148702106692544,0.14637775359404262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431715180663934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851587889301376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487761666094501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309509221998657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722716865474247,0.12245519467772148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810344835355306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6557484787632311,0.0,0.3142095809463035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886852061475354,0.11976716308496499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796628027484796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911735132087204,0.0,0.0,0.09317153447008862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571555601424165,0.1654384726415386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609572839203018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962494228245257,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Adawg1232,2020/01/24,"r/depression has a major problem... Recently I have found myself interested in mental health subreddit communities.  Until recently I have only been using addiction subreddits to cope with a heavy opioid abuse disorder, and they have been incredibly helpful to cope with the hell that is opiate addiction and drug abuse in general (in the past I have been dependent on/addicted to several other classes of drugs, including stimulants, benzodiazepines, dxm, and gabapentin (the last two were relatively mild problems but worth including) and I am still dealing with their aftermath today).  People were kind and always willing to provide aid and receptive to information that helped them and others.  

I very recently visited the r/depression subreddit in hopes to find a similar community of people there to help each other and provide information about what helped them fight depression among other things.  But it was pretty easy to realize that people didn't actually go there to discuss how to overcome this horrible illness.  It didn't seem like they wanted to.

It is just a place people go to to discuss how bad their life sucks and there doesn't seem to be an orientation to self care and helping eachother.  And on top of it all, there seems to be a idea that they can't positively influence their depression with their own actions.  It's painful to watch the echo chamber and I really struggle to see how it actually helps anyone.  In fact it seems like the most harmful thing a group of depressed people can do; enforce their reason to be depressed by watching other people cope with situations the same horrible way.  I wouldn't think too much about it; at first sight it doesn't sound much different to group therapy or something.  But the reason I am ultimately discussing this is because I said to someone claiming they were experiencing suicidal thoughts due to their financial situation that instead of just trying to look and focus on all the negativity that pervades your life, it helps so much to just take a little time out your day to look for positive aspects of life, no matter how meaningless or awkward the act may feel at first sight.  I also mentioned that a lot of people in horrible financial situations find a way to be happy, ideally providing them with hope.  It became a mantra for me that I learned from my mother who has been through severe depression while living in communist Romania the first half of her life.  This mantra obviously didn't cure my depression but it helped me so much in the past dealing with depression before and during drug addiction.

I got a stupid amount of hate from people absolutely convinced that there is absolutely nothing they themselves can do to help themselves in depression, and if I said otherwise I was shut down instantly, saying that they can't just will their depression away, which was a popular strawman argument used by people providing similar tips all with the intention of making people's lives easier.  The only thing people on the sub seem somewhat receptive to were antidepressants (and sometimes therapy), which are great but antidepressants only have a 70% efficacy rate and leaving almost a third of people classified as having treatment resistant depression.  I was one of those people and I didn't have access to therapy, so mental activities like this one have been crucial in helping me survive.  It really felt like these people were clinging desperately to their depression, and as much as I hate to say it, the only explanation was a need for attention.  

Don't get me wrong everyone craves a bit of attention, and in certain cases people with depression really genuinely need it, but in this case it's for all the wrong reasons.  They would talk about how bad their lives are, get affirmation, and the cycle continues.  It was a cesspool of people repeating eachother without absolutely any intention of improvement.  And the worst part was how frequently they believed and encouraged the belief that depression is not something you can improve upon with your own actions.  This is not healthy to people who are depressed and need only one thing: to get out of it.  Depression, like any illness, is oftentimes best treated with medication, but there is a huge component from you, and if you don't acknowledge that you are setting yourself up for failure.  And the sad thing is that the rest of the subreddit is just about the same.  I think that that makes it genuinely dangerous, because it's only perpetuating depression and hindering actual improvement.

I'm just wondering your guys' opinions on this and if you guys found similarly harmful communities and forums, or actually utile groups like r/mentalhealth has been for me...",13.750765246056039,10.451147637469587,12.451290322580647,53.02112903225809,53.76885644768856,16.591853072757242,49.38717526096853,14.508428754510335,7.1488130758967126,3826,188,571,123,31,1233,347,822,0.21899999999999997,0.6659999999999999,0.115,-0.9989,1,0,6,0,3,0,73.0,0,9,20,7,29,56,7,2,43,0,69,15,0,18,7,135,109,57,1,14,22,1,2,6,0,5,15,5,0,3,59,43,0,0,27,0,1,6,16,36,0,9,29,15,56,20,107,71,24,59,2,17,7,0,65,30,2,21,26,436,115,2,0.0,0.08670773645650677,0.14282855829458418,0.1595565851867196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0366401924269275,0.0,0.0,0.0292614832337222,0.030446303787610145,0.0,0.0,0.049765714662687525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02558499272726673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03437806570921712,0.0,0.06110323192492598,0.044610570570680484,0.0,0.031135898800689375,0.041225067108037534,0.03839956888473338,0.0,0.039947449626269636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03730654721882181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02359790480096204,0.07544658740928127,0.5672776195155212,0.0,0.0,0.03822938077016617,0.04193598853685115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730041006311554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034963878748578696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018501302759163497,0.0,0.0351327065284675,0.0,0.06688627645824557,0.09337181668802502,0.0,0.08023939107311573,0.0,0.0,0.05735122235805778,0.0,0.04159055337250619,0.0,0.029264839067735263,0.040341256899067035,0.0,0.07246087776646869,0.0,0.038951365624744105,0.0,0.07225126852956723,0.0,0.0388940882841686,0.0,0.0,0.2452590254712297,0.0,0.0,0.07268542812759637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041306324589790895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038103470896547316,0.0,0.02982621619299825,0.0,0.03874415370482609,0.0,0.0,0.10338006907787002,0.10725789004818227,0.03667338591645478,0.09693048942331492,0.0,0.061453763473234425,0.0,0.0,0.031108012859551483,0.0,0.0,0.048849008633190034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03686117195370886,0.07374942115230966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13449147658049967,0.08139438107749364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03510965991508587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438419641264904,0.16697276448503034,0.038934969757988186,0.0,0.0,0.039624045451006236,0.06985972082591317,0.4312442586882008,0.0,0.03822938077016617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037225786658891404,0.0,0.07002450982773738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032261064740378,0.11286366831158097,0.10838638594961013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696120643805907,0.0581966148563798,0.0,0.0,0.02915796445511247,0.16655350372860786,0.03817196760821463,0.08267390781211477,0.0,0.0,0.1233880756124257,0.0,0.0,0.031003089893633224,0.0563384508123204,0.0361890311455258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029221294068290764,0.0,0.0,0.038252431468381316,0.0,0.040024168797193435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027511571457916214,0.029410131853906424,0.0,0.0,0.12553359269472789,0.0,0.12154581732576265,0.046891547830402114,0.0,0.029048842870124318,0.021336268471651442,0.0,0.03468360282728576,0.0,0.0,0.02484261012489641,0.0,0.03574369160107204,0.0,0.0,0.06320504654244567,0.0,0.030191070508925336,0.02158207921411569,0.05808781761728411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03527202498721466,0.039680936216073145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025992906749088784,0.08001213661441926,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,murt1969,2020/01/24,It’s all coming back I had a girlfreind of almost four months before that I was depressed. When she ended it over reasons she wouldn’t tell me it all flooded back in. Now I’m coming back to the feeling of killing myself. I need help talking myself out of it.,1.204591194968554,3.5925125094339627,2.5493396226415115,92.51822327044027,84.28301886792455,3.5333333333333337,22.040880503144656,3.1291,-0.1529723270440253,205,7,40,0,6,66,39,53,0.14300000000000002,0.779,0.078,-0.6705,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,2,10,8,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,1,2,1,8,0,7,5,2,12,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,7,33,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24197229449220264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5574296512877872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20562186972421426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4163110814166547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20812825436316734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140255093947128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218283756718573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16196937081198487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673440943105265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19287852037730685,0.0,0.0,0.179176507577687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24845103129689225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19422488296698914,0.2112081474792616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moonturnsthetides,2020/01/24,"Can’t hold down a job I used to have a career and worked for over a decade. Now I have no idea what I want. I have had so many jobs and can’t keep them because I get so depressed I just stop showing up. It’s a pattern. Funny thing is I don’t care if I go homeless. I don’t want to think this way, but society isn’t for me. I don’t want to be around people anymore. I don’t know what to do. I’m not a lazy person. I keep the house clean and do laundry etc, but I can’t stand the idea of going out into the world. I get so anxious.",-0.9558333333333344,0.4454265887096796,1.7625806451612895,100.83053763440859,85.53225806451613,4.455913978494624,17.591397849462368,4.7782277997778095,-0.9242827956989248,403,9,109,1,12,140,72,124,0.087,0.782,0.131,0.3896,2,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,1,6,2,0,0,8,0,16,0,0,1,0,23,30,9,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,6,0,4,4,1,0,2,10,1,0,0,1,0,16,1,13,28,1,13,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,1,2,72,21,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20121644755045973,0.17663975752718286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15855790300607622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857573775067206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815975826086402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15340805070392746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986425394118884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18611287859269585,0.0,0.2024508970905852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20551793184901104,0.0,0.40213470562986897,0.0,0.0,0.35349838167009817,0.3166291794274855,0.0,0.0,0.09788598181062327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18057813731784086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348079347650885,0.1555209805380654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489100403416907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833004256911743,0.11412730962250893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538320283762944,0.0,0.0,0.3151661334373709,0.1413774262790583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12966803436428295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amanda_andrew,2020/01/24,"I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO I (16F) have been feeling really depressed and suicidal for a while now. My family has ignored my mental health,and the only person who is there for me is my boyfriend (16M). He knows I am a cutter. During the winter break I was going through a lot mentally with my family, and my boyfriend was there to help me through it, and he made me promise not to hurt myself. But, I could not get the thoughts of taking my life out my head and I cut pretty badly. I hid this from him for a few weeks, and he found out from a friend. Now we are having trust issues and I feel like this is all my fault and I just feel so alone. I feel like hes thinks he stuck with me or I am going to hurt myself, and I dont know what to do I feel as though I dont deserve him and the relationship  is really taking a toll on him. Please help any advice would be helpful.  (r/mental health)",1.8409523809523805,3.0371289682539704,3.5589206349206366,91.98885714285716,76.77777777777777,6.521481481481483,20.007407407407406,7.0316486544052195,0.17547661375661372,681,14,158,7,15,228,104,189,0.12300000000000001,0.705,0.17300000000000001,0.8393,0,1,0,0,0,4,22.0,1,0,0,0,7,12,1,0,10,0,22,3,1,1,1,36,40,15,1,2,5,0,5,2,1,1,2,0,0,1,6,14,0,1,11,0,0,2,5,7,0,0,7,5,33,5,19,30,3,11,0,3,0,0,16,3,0,2,7,113,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247109766095092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920540042968228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826965725204149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610088094126612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189529592913023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913256132522763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4046771899412749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170057244542048,0.0,0.2909815794852235,0.16445011518384325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619751730630782,0.08892337312390018,0.0,0.06013324028904021,0.0,0.13082413784080485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812235080772605,0.2446846773740771,0.0,0.0,0.2314405408428171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464266521614123,0.0,0.0,0.12013098177775915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18976229833171265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129615567928318,0.11246080222833503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785104145745248,0.0,0.1089072170373802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3479710050535428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753617582740987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049794042624256,0.0,0.1263415401320267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709465371803833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147467700597974,0.0,0.0,0.12357071009847308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589703553088727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730766880830613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374927500950873,0.11308185751654448,0.09137387016036293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232357644750844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176134577891693,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goldencrystlsnw,2020/01/24,"Is my relationship with this person toxic or am I just selfish? Hello everyone I’m a high school student and I’m really conflicted with a situation regarding one of my closer friends. I’ve been friends with someone who I’ll call John for about a year and a half. In the first year of our friendship we just started to get to know each other and we clicked really well, we have a similar taste in humor and have a lot of similar interests. John has depression (not suicidal or anything like that from what I know) and isn’t very trusting in other people so when I became one of the people he could confide anything to, I was glad that he felt comfortable talking to me. However, I am the main person John confides in. Whenever John has an episode where he lashes or becomes very depressed, I’m usually the person he turns to. He’s turned to me whenever he is going through a sudden depressive episode, is feeling frustrated, angry, or lost. Honestly it’s becoming too much for me. When John is going through something I will ask him if he wants my advice and he usually says yes. I find myself telling him similar things and finding him in similar situations. I told him that he should consider seeing a therapist and he has in the past but it “didn’t work”. I always try to listen to what he’s going through whether good or bad and I’m glad that he confides in me, but honestly I feel like I’m constantly being used as an emotional outlet and I’m about to burn out. I want to confront him about this problem but he is very sensitive to criticism and doesn’t like being wrong and hates it when he doesn’t get what he wants. I feel like I’m walking on eggshells whenever I talk about something that he does and I only talk about what he does in a positive way. I’m scared that if I criticize him in any sort of way he’ll get even more upset or yell at me. I don’t want to stop being friends with him because I know that he doesn’t have a lot of people to talk to, but honestly I’m not so sure if it’s good for me. I feel like all we talk about is his issues and whenever I come to school in the morning I’m not usually greeted with a hello it’s usually him telling me whatever issue has been going through his head. Recently he’s been worried about everyone at school hating him and the potential that all of his friends are fake. I don’t want to bring something like this up and make him think that I hate him when this has been on his mind. And besides me he’s done some pretty shitty things like lash out at teachers and not apologize and has lashed out his anger on other friends before. His parents often take care of any issue at school for him and they usually make things go his way if he can’t do it himself. I’m honestly not really sure what to do.",4.794729676008746,5.339824731663686,5.812166070363747,81.0489030510833,69.12522361359571,9.574259590538661,31.627956668654342,9.656535879935292,2.8566290598290607,2191,90,441,47,36,727,218,559,0.145,0.696,0.159,0.3266,2,0,3,0,0,0,34.0,5,0,1,3,20,45,6,2,20,1,40,2,1,3,4,90,92,42,1,12,22,1,5,7,5,3,0,3,0,3,31,34,1,2,11,0,0,8,13,17,1,4,10,11,59,28,68,75,9,53,0,4,2,0,74,24,0,15,25,284,90,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05983917114653928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050953309170502684,0.0,0.0,0.08328524417899384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078412288495596,0.0,0.057247451785497026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051129554006070485,0.037328935072332335,0.13526083899202546,0.05210737858230962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252886598744713,0.0,0.06243424646173752,0.0,0.0,0.052749445271758885,0.0,0.06617442860054773,0.0,0.04889201274839418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582275916222691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10717618118020546,0.06266575221606767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888232769311664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040445841473806164,0.0,0.0,0.11702736306541582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385117170490252,0.1312411649598045,0.05879622269518374,0.0,0.1119373027154642,0.05208736312410775,0.0,0.0,0.23655414830792024,0.0,0.09597994503705704,0.0,0.17400932633274033,0.10272380709743056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18137380069331335,0.06284586630000627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469926168226252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19174361755420816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009612147759312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20941792746050647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668463954860846,0.10412142031885817,0.0,0.0,0.08175109389049616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06183096626332875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04501555154154575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299028093639968,0.04657278461565649,0.0,0.0,0.06799540014219542,0.0,0.05845675026169023,0.1273601253242089,0.16040690227375326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622990898986413,0.0,0.05859464130121377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176881682252736,0.0,0.06046322373195377,0.06574461371909583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0486973744028084,0.0613079808610318,0.24789665625541066,0.04879721321930919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13766379894016867,0.0,0.0,0.05188511668316302,0.14142753694106033,0.0,0.0,0.043343199921601364,0.0,0.0,0.051196089869524786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06698231290215546,0.0,0.11542852762566365,0.0,0.04604189776336773,0.24609613560171506,0.10704603469593046,0.0,0.0,0.07109978784574959,0.12204755595524094,0.03923759597804101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851368153270791,0.0,0.041575266512686455,0.13321450233367665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0528882963935314,0.3372143550856916,0.15157849312950727,0.18059307993678705,0.14581900732878292,0.0,0.0,0.0550585739667223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044580582513346234,0.06218819351300142,0.0,0.0,0.06695202088809962,0.0,0.07886803255471489
mentalhealth,zensama,2020/01/24,Are there any free online talk therapies? Or maybe buddy chats? As in you are paired with someone online and you can talk about your problems together,4.352222222222224,7.479936074074079,3.653333333333337,84.90000000000002,77.14814814814815,6.562962962962962,23.814814814814817,7.793537801064563,1.562392592592592,122,4,20,2,3,36,23,27,0.086,0.797,0.11699999999999999,0.2406,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,4,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,0,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25708086657446705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3797930306369364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36173421380531695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32031294116297154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6077101260832807,0.0,0.0,0.4323228687716523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dilyz,2020/01/24,"please help me, from normal to delirious, a loved one  This happened on Wednesday morning when I was called to help someone dear to me. It was the first day of classes, she had an audition that day to host an event, and she was excited to see everyone again after a long break from the semester as we are in college. She's been sleep deprived for nights leading up and on Tuesday she seemed normal. She was locked out of her own dorm, forced to go to school on borrowed clothes and was spotted wandering about the gate.  She was unlike anyone I'd ever seen, someone a kin to someone you'd find in an old peoples home or a mental asylum. She's built up stress and was nervous about many things, she had issues at home and the audition may have built nervousness and stress. She was under what I observe to be delirium, she had mood swings ranging in seconds, from smiling with her eyes closed describing a happy thought, to becoming terrified and mentioning the noisiness, she'd cry and whimper about the bad things that has happened, then proceed to smile about all the things she'd love. She kept shaking and stuttering when discussing the fear, then become energetic and do outlandish things such as stand atop a medical bed. She seemed to be aware enough about things such as realize who people are, who her friends are and proceed to act somewhat for a brief second, normal. She'd speak in metaphors according to her interests and generally just seemed like she's out of the zone. She can reply and understand things. It's been two days and I called her mother to ask about her- she's still not herself. From googling I found links to stress induced nervous breakdowns and sleep deprivation but please, i don't know what's happening and I just wake up hoping that she'd be alright again. How can a seemingly normal person crumble into someone borderline insane. Please help me, will she ever come back to normal?",7.799453781512604,7.889238266106446,6.873460784313727,77.57607352941179,62.69747899159664,9.941120448179273,36.05728291316528,9.516144504307137,3.3254583753501405,1539,65,273,25,20,469,191,357,0.086,0.7979999999999999,0.11599999999999999,0.9022,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,1,0,2,19,23,0,8,20,1,32,7,4,3,3,55,52,26,0,6,5,2,0,1,1,2,1,2,5,1,16,23,0,1,12,0,3,6,2,12,0,5,17,5,38,10,53,25,4,48,0,2,3,2,46,17,0,8,24,197,54,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056174608118794565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751057340976619,0.0,0.0,0.06177541453346413,0.06707936454710155,0.0,0.17745531530776976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16406935979886836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920457918763757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824816560363101,0.15543522744947974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301123641105942,0.0,0.0,0.1453417031435872,0.0,0.07676696288137981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904032460299835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342801322282604,0.06833596121109223,0.0,0.08808711413897108,0.06206939316385255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045658270495704326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21312944195297384,0.08552191993902669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615477845584163,0.0,0.16117230669148255,0.07979434437483877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838526123917273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044151986476476536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03924937563550802,0.0,0.0,0.07109712154303588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501742310876886,0.0,0.0,0.08145071775680307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093267453198558,0.08096240003624808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539232177971833,0.3935737896775547,0.0,0.0,0.0843018328364339,0.0,0.054439505849573584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113933215529689,0.0701485555184964,0.0,0.2645629304835847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08130693929478594,0.06401945250748822,0.29254892983559594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607932134861178,0.0,0.2722824968233105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06415849949649964,0.0,0.2760827405237655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202403250782268,0.0,0.0,0.06377986431063569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847912601786285,0.08363530254287818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hoppythefry,2020/01/24,"I'm scared I've been in high school for two years but had depression for a long time. Lately its taken a turn for the worse. I've started having more suicidal thoughts and other concerns. One being that if i do live past 20, what will I become? Will I get over my adversities with adhd or will I succumb to them and fall in a deep hole of debt and addiction? Will I become even more mentally worse off and turn to killing? Will I even graduate? I'm scared that I wont get better and the only way to solve this problem is death. I mean yeah sure I shouldn't because I have people that care about me but that's not my fault. Besides why should I suffer through just because of their feelings that would only last a little but longer after I might die? Yes, I'm in therapy and yes I'm taking anti depressants but it's not helping. My therapist has not presented me with any real help, or anything that I haven't already thought of myself. And the antidepressant is too small of a dose. I'm very scared I'll go over the edge.",2.026531100478465,4.127683363636368,3.334303827751196,89.76987679425837,79.0,6.285263157894738,22.89019138755981,7.365786028017652,0.875637129186603,809,26,168,11,20,263,126,209,0.29600000000000004,0.602,0.102,-0.9951,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,1,5,13,1,3,9,3,20,2,0,0,1,31,38,14,4,5,11,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,0,0,11,9,0,0,4,0,1,2,6,10,0,2,5,1,21,3,21,22,2,22,0,3,0,0,4,10,0,4,9,107,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976005502605484,0.14305069253738306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135234777495228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094434793129134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795138609688413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14511892656065722,0.2629181320359347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527218814031387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135881735702515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050403902853428,0.0,0.1235341434146653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572361249295755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06018504498008213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243763188720252,0.0,0.06764738024275121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15956633618620325,0.1257615223472589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316888415886621,0.0,0.0,0.09702517636344088,0.13427080266487004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929913313053288,0.10510549701685523,0.1053376302468431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296583505464826,0.0,0.0,0.11995404559034036,0.12627181114846664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065767521308241,0.1810550581544484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136274157267416,0.08252027833933945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138954464058812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548197506457835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3575087939790388,0.12046451560985325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842499073994311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301992854614741,0.0,0.11218418092463192,0.0,0.08949559861925603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612095359251525,0.13820277582085566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889927360809068,0.0694072355006156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589404913844417,0.11627482209052654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821205350939606,0.0,0.09448031745655074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740588355202188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426030770708713,0.08455535711301009,0.0,0.0,0.07665129076220446
mentalhealth,thanksim,2020/01/24,"I’m getting depressed again and it’s worse this time. I’ve been institutionalized twice this year. Went to two outpatient therapy programs. Tried different medications and nothing has worked. I’m on my second job - I’ve caught the flu, had a stomach virus and I keep missing work. I don’t know if this is related to depression but I’m afraid of losing my job. I’m so tired and physically ill I can’t get out of bed. I’m afraid my husband is going to divorce me and honestly this is a lot to ask someone to go through. 
I’m just not sure what to do. I keep getting depressed and nothing has worked. I keep trying to watch all of the ted talks, eat better, lose weight, take walks, etc. I’ve tried looking up mental health professionals but no one I can see works out of office hours and the profession I am is not very understanding of me having to take off at all which is why I’m afraid I’m going to be without a job soon. It’s a crap cycle. 
I’m not sure what to do. I feel alone and my husband is my only resource and I’m screwing it up.  I can see how people with mental health issues end up homeless.",1.627296546248509,3.6436960349345,3.5158336641524417,88.39553691941248,79.9170305676856,6.259706232631997,23.94620881302104,7.348242739294969,0.9934349344978162,868,31,185,12,22,292,124,229,0.196,0.77,0.033,-0.9875,4,1,0,0,1,0,22.0,0,0,0,7,5,15,2,3,7,0,19,11,2,1,4,32,50,14,0,1,8,2,2,0,0,0,6,0,1,0,10,12,2,3,3,0,0,6,7,11,0,4,4,6,16,4,26,45,4,20,0,6,4,1,5,8,2,2,6,107,26,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10778507197775317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729134548127168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204140476705372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26890586045424103,0.0,0.0,0.10873093713177673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648952969861664,0.0,0.0,0.09217507723629803,0.0,0.11606549273492987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052620888610690135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16311674494897715,0.0,0.17743603556681878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212429593588381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10248792759698963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862197913014836,0.30982007155425595,0.2775064331636425,0.0,0.0,0.05719411735436376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739253890732435,0.2328552855778928,0.0,0.08847654140309771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483951582679292,0.20975604399730516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19971582840412666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705204846883383,0.07914987893338163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07214899276148387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586053638271545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817812243367927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19616937364656634,0.0,0.1564952864170637,0.08364747566457809,0.0,0.0,0.11901304616359686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06068401891636915,0.11961308671170502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21196997376849824,0.0,0.10166120941636393,0.10834047775299158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586859957744304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267291503025679,0.0,0.09647387700270313,0.0939069337971605,0.0,0.0,0.1003197084057458,0.0,0.30305662311845394,0.0,0.1060561597933658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701762928645201
mentalhealth,paperthinpatience,2020/01/24,"Deep in the Depression Hole Lately I have been feeling super depressed. Low energy, aches/pains, becoming easily emotional, angry over little things, ruminating over negative things, fluctuating between numbness and intense sadness, and suicidal thoughts. It’s causing me to feel isolated and alone. I’m getting mad at my fiancé over little things and things that aren’t his fault. He had an amputation in October and I’m finding myself getting angry at him for not being there the way I need him to be, but I’m also expecting too much of him and I rationally know this. I’m dealing with chronic, unrelenting neck/back pain. My job is a living hell. Life is just miserable right now, and I don’t know how to push through it. I’m not an angry or selfish person, but right now I don’t feel like myself. I’m already in antidepressants for OCD and anxiety. I just feel hopeless and trapped.",5.2119720279720285,7.204889460606066,6.237575757575757,72.94867132867134,69.54545454545455,9.44055944055944,33.29836829836829,9.851270322608157,3.692123543123543,711,34,118,18,13,236,107,165,0.316,0.617,0.066,-0.9935,2,2,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,0,1,9,14,2,1,5,0,10,5,0,2,0,29,26,14,1,2,7,0,4,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,8,10,0,0,8,0,0,1,6,12,0,0,3,4,15,2,17,21,1,19,1,6,0,0,7,14,1,1,4,79,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526664580177399,0.16266437231899095,0.11787921026028535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11276392889835775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334485105804512,0.0,0.0,0.16279653026141905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142487803990487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15196741856185736,0.2539183117073017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16581006044817714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981282856534417,0.10530570139956208,0.0,0.0,0.13472491095500352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15402538426894138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462760784930512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620191582326701,0.0,0.16627853408200052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411605592765183,0.07201432267391787,0.2954757785087473,0.1301607469461811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835916224354902,0.10929846224133882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31369725518838104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12870779803304905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517650292892867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161236440800112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39171561721218334,0.0,0.0,0.11702259346030405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700271670743205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DownhillExistence,2020/01/24,"I will see the GP tomorrow and I will make them leave me alone I have an appointment tomorrow. I will turn away antidepressants and talking therapy. I have read the side effects for SSRIs. Talking is a bad idea. The gp will have heard that a lot. I will explain and hopefully be left alone. I know what to say.

Weakness. It is not that I do not feel I deserve this. Deserving implies a god or moral authority. People are born amoral. Religion was the source of morality. Religion had been tossed away. Replaced by hedonism absolutely, so that now only a self interested view of the world remains. There is one person who matters. I know mostly millenials read this, the chances are almost certain you turn off immediately upon hearing that word, religion. Science came along, it was not a replacement, but it had some charactersitics of a replacement. Now we are with reduced morality. We are reduced to the most basic acts of help, that is in immediately life against death situations. That is it. Toss away anyone else in your daily life. Throw away the deformed, let medicine sort them out. Science, my god. 

I see so many posts with people mentioning friends and girlfriends/boyfriends. ""Social anxiety"" ""depression"" they say. ""Attention seeking"", I say. 6 years have I suffered no meaningful interaction and yet people who have someone that cares about them bitch how they are ""unwanted""

Age 13 onwards targeted, mainly for one particular physical trait that persists. I am 19 now. I have not had physical contact with a person my age since primary school. I feel hatred and alone simultaneously. If there were an option placed before me to die instantly, I would take it. No hesistation. An escape would be the greatest gift. There is no way out, because what I have been shunmed for is physical and can not be corrected. There is no one left that I could find to help. I am too old. You might think I am still young. That is not what I mean. It is over. Do I die in my 20s. 30s. 80s. Any way now, my life will be a negative experience. It would be best if I could go. Could I succeed, I think I could. I am more intelligent than most as well as lucid.

Empathy is strange. My empathy for others is decreasing all the time. If someone had reached out I could have been a good friend. I would have listened. That was what I wanted more than anything. Now how to view people I do not know, somewhere on the specteum from like myself, through to tools. My emotion is sometimes dampened. It is hard to tell. I always find reasons to hate someone now. This is what I mean by too old. The older I am, the quicker I am to find reasons to avoid. It is too late. Hatred, nagging why this person is bad. Jealousy and rage at what they have experienced. What I have missed.

To be lonely is something almost no people know until they reach old age, I think by that point most will. But to feel that at 19 for years is unreasonable. I have now developed incorrectly. I will never be right. I have talked to many people online now who claim to be lonely, then they refer in passing to ""hanging out with a friend"" or ""meeting with my girl/boyfriend"". Bullshit. 

The bitches of the group are silent, and if you were not the bitch of the group, you targetted the bitch of the group most probably. Maybe you did not realise you did it, or else in your mind they deserved it, or maybe you found it to be useful to become closer with the rest. Bullying is nothing like how it is portrayed in fiction. Nothing at all. Unless you were the group bitch you would have no clue. It is not something that can be cured, it is over for many of the group bitches. They are the ones who are alone or dead.

I should not have been born, my mother should not have had children. Good boys are quiet. Everyone is happy when you are quiet. Good boy, quiet boy. My brother got a pass. ""Look at how popular ... is"" ""... talks"" ""you never talk to me""

Significantly mentally ill people should be sterlised or imprisoned. They are incapable. Do not ever think otherwise, any other sentiment is virtue signalling.",2.7620971867007675,5.5129345098814255,3.610257149500118,85.08310950941643,80.71277997364953,6.733820041850732,26.057211501201266,7.928766900206844,1.8272203084553984,3179,130,590,60,85,1011,321,759,0.18600000000000005,0.6970000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.9969,0,9,2,0,0,0,136.0,2,13,11,4,27,36,9,1,37,0,116,5,0,9,7,119,150,33,4,20,26,2,4,2,3,17,5,9,0,8,46,23,0,1,25,2,0,7,22,18,1,4,21,19,81,18,75,95,15,73,3,5,5,0,68,31,6,23,34,444,127,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173177720087356,0.24268269262783135,0.0,0.0,0.04874281887829968,0.0,0.0,0.07967210841335844,0.0,0.0448131407705268,0.0,0.0,0.040960133460117,0.06002159840223752,0.04820591957188913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22014939375761733,0.0,0.09782283548676332,0.035709506424046716,0.06469643172981485,0.04984682168456407,0.0,0.061475548697475214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669993177382485,0.05972568252445011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23385473493153555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050454419058998966,0.0,0.12159250050712672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787127518922276,0.06589402881422603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05298849210921549,0.0,0.05597520214648608,0.0,0.05730197056666105,0.0,0.0,0.08885863345121135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062174648149888,0.0,0.0,0.06422937466014382,0.1357750795022954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033292067638589565,0.14740106203165146,0.046851360353360516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06235894422369748,0.052475706620685035,0.0578351073455627,0.0,0.0,0.06602332978045819,0.0,0.07852917937235626,0.0,0.0,0.05818263988676432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612910099214618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877499775566334,0.0,0.06608020337469855,0.062027209601575664,0.12729354974520596,0.05990148572368501,0.12412925435482547,0.05723794853564065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491920083840308,0.0,0.0,0.04980217786219348,0.0,0.0,0.03910225682568768,0.17817119058591666,0.11770191969062405,0.12762045066080738,0.0,0.0,0.0590343363628482,0.0621435695294708,0.059148574228195874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036021037415247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241717917930946,0.0,0.18440792590545105,0.0,0.15877988292402906,0.044552333148426417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842814421961355,0.1534480235267031,0.06120308710405958,0.0,0.05537654181383499,0.0,0.05610294761101541,0.0,0.06315858570705274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719066202699575,0.0,0.0,0.12045892074624805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05002655462992172,0.0,0.13975425771201702,0.0,0.05928555972665195,0.0933605202266824,0.0,0.06111117186292697,0.0,0.0,0.04845755002058268,0.06584578830185041,0.0,0.059714401319171474,0.14890260629613453,0.09019468908230588,0.057936602183721764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04678164725991624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04404447758208055,0.2354198296354838,0.05120104626928245,0.0,0.06699073900229757,0.0,0.0,0.15014145813985685,0.0,0.0,0.0341581650405688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743530233699188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05059386120075818,0.0,0.0,0.03455169420528635,0.09299532688454562,0.0,0.0,0.05266998635117177,0.0,0.05285886795859399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080659042604293,0.0,0.0,0.0754465271968593
mentalhealth,humanfleshhehe,2020/01/24,"hey guys, i have a question so basically, my brother doesn't quite have the same level of academic success as my sister and i, and i'm from an asian family so a certain level of achievement is... expected?? but i truly believe that the \[ i guess \] root of his low academic achievement is because of the low self-esteem, his belief that he isn't smart, so he doesn't try to apply himself rhetoric. i bring up mental health stigmatization because i kind of think that there have been times where the excuse used by family members is a learning disability. however, i do think that he is a smart person, just feels overshadowed by me and my sister (did i mention he's a middle child and my sister skipped 2 grades and is in the same grade as him?) and therefore doesn't believe he can succeed. i have been trying to figure out how exactly to describe this, because i've noticed it for a while and i want him to be happy with wherever he is in his life. 

idk but do you guys have any ideas? i should probably point out i've kind of brought up talking to a counselor just to see how he feels, but since mental health isn't really ""real"" in my household, it is difficult.

thanks for all the help!",4.6822435897435914,5.645282982905982,5.5949465811965835,80.99831730769235,69.5982905982906,8.414102564102564,30.43696581196581,8.660442795831766,2.3600863247863253,934,37,179,15,16,307,125,234,0.067,0.8109999999999999,0.122,0.9331,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,0,5,9,12,0,0,14,0,25,3,0,5,3,39,37,18,0,3,5,4,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,7,10,0,0,9,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,4,3,24,9,27,31,3,18,1,2,1,0,28,14,0,2,2,120,31,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09439444744672068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538488709251612,0.0,0.0,0.3127789850497071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617123438610139,0.0,0.14037135910399196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15291306231519125,0.27488420751640424,0.0,0.14776408458571302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950935998739498,0.0,0.0,0.0930403204197758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566977471191263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28909510135326155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980444525287398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797723656285505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580342424046932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120210933747493,0.0,0.0,0.13121877078756305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496588936344501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549713544191748,0.1476397813499458,0.0,0.15799430722534008,0.08892419235565978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061229451106716,0.0,0.14480739660845665,0.0,0.0,0.11482371308872748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115689049982096,0.0,0.1277960920591685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17788558960215062,0.0,0.0,0.08094027330291577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18848353504161386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988585886201812,0.0,0.0,0.08187276947497528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clousseau,2020/01/24,"manic depressive Hello - 

Is there a website that has statistics on manic depression; specifically, how many manic episodes end with suicide?",9.61285714285714,13.580543857142858,8.733571428571429,51.14892857142861,62.80952380952381,11.81904761904762,43.83333333333334,11.20814326018867,7.176790476190478,115,7,11,4,2,36,19,21,0.38799999999999996,0.612,0.0,-0.8957,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7046480491325461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36230702583135976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4147241021352343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4474468292379051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CHICKEN_MAN112,2020/01/24,"Death Depression I'm 13 and experiencing this phase where I am thinking about death, life, how short and meaningless life is without an afterlife. I spend sometime crying on my bed where my mom trys to comfort me. School is no longer a joy to me and I feel like I am losing my will to live, I've asked some others and they say they also went through this phase at various earlier life times such as eight, ten, or twelve. I feel depressed now and don't know what to do, please help me, I just want some comfort or assurance of something like an afterlife or a meaning to living a full and good life. Thanks.",4.037416666666669,5.450555241666668,4.458333333333336,86.84666666666668,71.58333333333334,8.0,27.5,8.515128840125781,1.7839999999999998,479,17,99,8,9,151,79,120,0.179,0.623,0.198,-0.0772,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,1,8,11,0,0,5,0,7,4,0,1,1,21,17,12,2,1,5,1,2,2,0,1,4,1,1,0,4,6,0,0,5,0,1,1,3,3,0,2,1,4,14,8,12,15,4,9,0,3,0,0,6,6,0,5,4,65,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398293347271959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16346331306102474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19206705978494076,0.0,0.0,0.3012000888255594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17682117039226955,0.12491453019720848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14665782768204852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719982235199915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609426063642047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49401344995905394,0.17084801990255846,0.0,0.3087955986961892,0.0,0.0,0.19561501722504435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19046543291898801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20478492039054444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19193533689339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13904958053124794,0.0,0.17695987971697458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460985613280413,0.17293341246861166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16098052133783014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203830450223484,0.0,0.0,0.1019577921639196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031324268300107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16208984962325682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16855139396212604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cweave06,2020/01/24,"Mental/Nervous breakdown effects on brain?, Ran into an old friend from highschool today after not seeing him in several years.  This guy was a genius back when I knew him, a bit of an ass,  but good hearted. He went to work with CDC several years ago, but currently is living with his parents. My wife follows his parents on social media and said that he seems divorced too (last I knew him, he married his highschool sweetheart prior to moving to Atlanta.). She also said that it appears as though he had a mental breakdown, especially given that he's back living with his parents (he's in his early 30s). So I saw him today, and he had a strange demeanor, kinda like a waiter at a classy restaurant. He smiled throughout our short talk, like a waiter smiles...it appeared to be a fake smile that he held for the longest. He was also less outspoken than the guy i knew. Barely said much of anything, and what he did say lacked any complex thoughts, it was like meeting Superman's Bizarro.  I think he may be taking some medications, but my question is whether a nervous or mental breakdown can actually damage the brain?  THis guy was completely different than the person i knew.",5.892876712328768,7.168748881278539,5.998977168949772,78.05709589041099,67.03652968036529,7.666484018264841,33.32146118721461,7.793537801064563,2.548540091324201,931,41,156,10,15,295,131,219,0.067,0.794,0.14,0.9583,5,0,0,0,1,0,33.0,1,0,0,2,8,9,0,1,15,0,13,5,4,1,0,30,33,14,0,1,6,4,0,3,2,1,1,4,0,4,9,7,0,1,10,0,0,6,1,3,0,0,20,6,19,6,21,10,5,27,0,1,2,1,42,7,1,8,17,98,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.10528327751563976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563634097970583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17255623926196448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07336764594079846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878275998550003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659186653447844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778592391502316,0.0,0.0,0.2408777264195521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311867924449093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127201605319035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335412194545741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049146680314404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3204787107286757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278479847015983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794324704201609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812611061149304,0.0,0.1905344372681825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868596708369077,0.32617765801914544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466803607075116,0.07931020866630044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321047131754375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3593910896759128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942037766593095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085942644402145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307879028401404,0.08579699221997074,0.0,0.0,0.08597289226114575,0.09821732551886196,0.0,0.243765814999908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997838869335487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111846670666778,0.08671641332008871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691303742376754,0.10599956580728806,0.08565114489486461,0.0,0.0,0.20453071432260286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001340179474744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854386274342437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895287083713975
mentalhealth,gunlockstudy,2020/01/24,"Online Research Study (Free gun lock + Raffle up to $100) Do you own and have access to any kind of gun? Have you ever had thoughts of suicide? You may be eligible to participate in a study investigating ways to help increase the safety of at-risk gun owners. This study may also help make an impact on suicide. 

If you are interested, please complete a screening questionnaire (operating on Florida State University's Qualtrics server) to verify whether you are eligible. Access the screener here:

https://fsu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_6xmb1z08bVlG6JD 

All eligible participants will receive a free gun lock, and 2 out of 64 participants (selected at random after the study is complete) will receive a $100 Visa Gift Card, and 6 out of 64 participants (selected at random after the study is complete) will receive a $50 Visa Gift Card. The study is conducted online and by phone over 3 sessions in a one-month period. The first session takes approximately 1 hour. The second session at two weeks and the third session at one month each take approximately 15-30 minutes. 

**Information Requested by Moderators** (Taken from consent form, which will be provided to participants):

* How personal information will be used:   The records of this study will be kept private and confidential, to the extent allowed by law. In any publications or presentations, we will not include any information that will make it possible to identify you as a subject. All data will be collected securely via Florida State University’s Qualtrics online software. No identifiable data will be collected via Qualtrics. Email address and home address may be provided directly to the Principal Investigator for initial scheduling and/or for mailing study materials.  

​

* How privacy/confidentiality is protected: The information described above is collected securely through Florida State University's Qualtrics online software and all contact information is destroyed once participant completes participation in the study.

​

* Accountability (department, faculty, school, organization): Florida State University, Clinical Psychology; Faculty Supervisor: Dr. Thomas Joiner \[850-644-1454\];   FSU IRB \[850-644-7900\]   
  
* Conflicts of Interest: There are no conflicts of interest regarding the research team and this study.",9.143201612903226,12.569618952777779,8.999032258064519,51.227903225806465,62.25,12.422939068100359,43.00179211469534,11.713562520984848,6.811149641577061,1893,113,230,70,31,612,191,360,0.083,0.8109999999999999,0.107,0.7998,1,0,0,4,0,2,94.0,1,6,0,2,6,9,1,0,22,0,33,2,0,6,4,42,41,16,2,1,4,0,0,0,0,13,2,0,3,1,6,13,0,6,6,1,5,5,3,1,0,5,4,1,7,10,41,17,8,34,0,0,1,0,26,14,0,7,10,141,13,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973271225686245,0.0,0.26373376086646,0.2957688141414844,0.24828989897760864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.510419819380301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008877606630534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352186837402684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16315205242631406,0.0,0.1220796343766485,0.0,0.11985451291292093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267366097821193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16247752762987705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19428689702719856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961142422063932,0.16494036987342012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626776008288816,0.0,0.13359510073847167,0.0,0.13720364711460764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317155006526165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662501521961465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18301342183873132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661985579866536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11888770728831333,0.0,0.0,0.10511369609423793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660344453192236,0.09762408692463218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957688141414844,0.0
mentalhealth,AaronNeedsPizza,2020/01/24,"My hands are severely shaking and its annoying me Using a throwaway account cause life is tough and I dont want people I know finding out about this. I'm 15 and earlier today my dad was arrested after an extensive house search on suspicion of having indecent content of minors. After an entire day of trying to be mature and there for everyone else, the reality of the situation is only starting to set in for me. There'll be safeguarding in place while he's RUI so that'll make communication and life in general really difficult. I'm so angry I feel like I could kill him if someone handed me the knife. My anxiety is ramping up but I cant let that on for the sake of my siblings. Even though they're older they need me, I want to be there for them. How do I stop shaking? I'm trying to sleep but all I can think about is the house search and what they found :(",3.32652709359606,4.966299534482761,5.19392446633826,79.96137931034481,73.77011494252874,8.649589490968804,26.79638752052545,9.23628265651192,2.3463904761904764,685,25,133,16,14,235,110,174,0.171,0.7979999999999999,0.031,-0.9552,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,3,0,9,7,2,2,8,0,17,5,3,4,1,26,30,14,1,5,3,1,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,5,0,1,2,2,6,0,0,2,3,20,1,24,22,1,19,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,1,9,91,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058106842014885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17535059795286612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13628592246564664,0.0,0.0,0.11008403626404432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20005305521654226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142593617208108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274231730903787,0.0,0.0,0.1631062133928632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630842869527915,0.12194441195714882,0.0,0.0,0.1560119710902516,0.0,0.0,0.1871580572767121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3939178036790232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888485253767014,0.0,0.09380940781881242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745470161488333,0.24113359574371385,0.08339286585863627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394011636192962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656804454745435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12982110075529854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833829419455473,0.0,0.17833975408203873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935147118619708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928365577885556,0.0,0.0,0.1918681270623534,0.17081809157616334,0.0,0.1446291652133882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081867061450435,0.0,0.0,0.1427085109056284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937434690449108,0.16770679184336504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16179872847232518,0.0,0.0,0.231781153195526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742551710280524,0.0,0.0,0.2013604522011065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,athequeen16,2020/01/24,"Struggling with my mental health I’ve been struggling with mental health for a long long time and i recently joined a forum that lets you reach out to those who have similar problems. it’s recently become very exclusive and i feel like if i’m not helping, i’m useless. there’s a group that only supports each other and i don’t know what to do anymore. any suggestions?",5.2641666666666636,6.480573750000001,5.595444444444446,80.59400000000002,68.44444444444444,8.537777777777778,31.06666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.585596666666667,298,12,54,5,5,95,52,72,0.14300000000000002,0.7140000000000001,0.14300000000000002,-0.2413,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,2,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,12,10,4,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,5,2,6,8,1,6,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,1,6,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257260589441505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833532050345011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20418757708626414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348186384977948,0.1320796947429902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3930417131021904,0.0,0.0,0.12392246711208188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160627904034973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890543095926272,0.0,0.09032397704473982,0.0,0.0,0.3272293976768699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3726350212687383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061104632645366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769070475489061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650972224822655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3865574913289966,0.0,0.0,0.2098018343487688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078061458856664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254696274815496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,njph1993,2020/01/24,Feels like the world has ended for me so I should end mine..... I'm a 26(m) she was a 30(f) I struggled with paranoia throughout our relationship and it continued to get worse throughout everything then anxiety & depression also kicked in & it cost me my marriage my home my job it cost me everything but she moved on even tho we only separated in december it has only been a month & I feel I'm going worse & going to do something stupid & I dont know where to turn so I need help.......,0.8370862470862477,3.3582621414141443,2.7557575757575776,88.86902097902097,89.20202020202021,6.278477078477079,21.756798756798762,7.61054688173877,1.186676146076146,388,14,79,8,13,129,66,99,0.17800000000000002,0.804,0.018000000000000002,-0.9319,1,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,2,0,0,0,6,4,1,1,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,9,17,7,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,2,3,1,3,0,0,2,2,16,1,8,14,0,13,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,6,48,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466424465177457,0.0,0.7090391183299598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012241697287108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272627395202504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338973446473053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23184068187735454,0.0,0.0,0.08644463887968516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352520115059801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235315946869167,0.09350030145412178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837910801282054,0.0,0.14876360909709596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772573297102572,0.0,0.13128275430507585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987765384832187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192792002124546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394108571080387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446672410740848,0.13910413709037134,0.0,0.09704544988747994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990794307162139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051554335721447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075739073143003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682361258837047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235925286941453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667546710132285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Unicorn_trouble90,2020/01/24,"Copropraxia? So, ever since I was younger, I've had this 'tic' that is basically thrusting my pelvic region back and forth if I am sitting in a chair or something. I couldn't control it and it was just random. In school, kids used to say I was jumping a chair😳🥺 I never knew why I did it. Even my mom said it was a tic. Well, I'm 30 years old now and it still happens. If it's happening, I try to stop when someone's around, but it is still uncontrollable. Very, very embarrassing. It doesn't happen everyday. It just tends to happen when I'm really stressed or something. Idk, really. Well, I looked up all kinds of things that could relate to it and found 'copropraxia.' It included in the definition ""indecent movements of the trunk and pelvis,"" which I guess kinda explains it. I really feel and want to tell my boyfriend about it. We have been together for 4 years & I've done a good job of keeping it hidden. It's just so embarrassing and kinda unbelievable, I'm afraid he'll see me different or something.",2.2922499999999992,4.612875725000002,3.8859999999999992,85.01300000000002,79.25,7.4,24.5,8.395991825355821,1.6900499999999998,795,29,161,17,20,264,119,200,0.09699999999999999,0.8420000000000001,0.061,-0.8337,2,0,3,0,0,0,31.0,1,0,0,1,17,9,0,5,6,0,15,1,1,2,3,36,35,17,0,5,9,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,20,9,0,3,4,0,0,2,3,5,2,0,11,5,15,4,15,21,1,21,0,0,2,0,8,5,0,9,13,101,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14017914992257874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517232233983725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948237666010737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14510650386532956,0.10329643552259442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517068069370278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323968572652906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545181556456402,0.117028256028289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541653663477692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185441787570613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851468900534958,0.0,0.0,0.14252256310301925,0.0,0.4576280835312704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838599902131387,0.11499558591482838,0.0,0.13472549107827486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864349451285656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152394045643758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978296620179984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357586468776908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24864528166215655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306647318443352,0.10288521401247801,0.0,0.13093570672233582,0.10309614813630713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702139926201293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096201057957195,0.2988005530868925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20664013543448004,0.10816436671222968,0.14820009648154214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308057491743127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595185447637255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783800451748526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173957035535856,0.0,0.21349796775927612,0.07630948446944336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23264963400003705,0.0,0.11674197333401805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666281705665627
mentalhealth,WarKittyKat,2020/01/24,"I don't understand why there's so much blame in therapy Therapy just always seemed to have a reason why you should stay.  I felt like there was lip service paid to the idea that fit was important and you could leave if it wasn't working.  But there was also so much covert pressure to blame yourself if it was't working.  Like it clearly would work if you'd just be a good enough therapy patient.

This wasn't a thing with a single therapist, either - this was in my experience a very consistent pattern.

It wouldn't be put as overt blame.  It might be something more like, I'd protest that therapy was pushing me too hard and I couldn't handle the stress it was putting on me.  That it was interfering with my life in ways I couldn't handle.  And I'd be told in response that therapy could be difficult sometimes and it wouldn't work unless I was willing to handle being uncomfortable sometimes.  Or I'd fail to complete something the therapist asked me to do because I was already too overwhelmed and didn't have the skills to do it, and I'd try to express that I couldn't and just get told how therapy wouldn't work if I wasn't willing to put some effort in outside of the sessions.

Maybe that's true sometimes.  But I feel like the constant diet (and I reiterate that this was consistent across multiple therapists and even multiple modalities) of that therapy would work if you'd just see things more clearly/try harder/tolerate more discomfort/etc. caused a lot of problems.  Especially to someone who was already quite vulnerable.

I feel like I was manipulated to the point where I'd never even seriously consider leaving therapy until it got to a major crisis point.  The message that if therapy wasn't working, it was **my fault** for not being a good enough patient, was so strong.  In retrospect most of therapy, I feel like I didn't leave for the same reasons people don't leave abusive relationships - because you think you need this person and if you could just be good enough for them things would work out.

I don't understand why this seemed to be so consistent.  I don't see any reason to believe my therapists were exceptionally shitty or deliberately unethical, or really anything other than pretty standard outpatient providers.  But nonetheless it very much mirrored an abusive relationship and did the same sort of damage.  And I don't get why that is.",6.73477749113189,7.613806191873594,6.9085738471460845,73.7112387133183,64.95936794582393,10.301483392454047,35.46025475653015,10.290406445055957,3.7813586584972594,1905,87,333,44,28,613,183,443,0.10800000000000001,0.775,0.11699999999999999,0.6231,0,0,2,0,0,0,39.0,0,7,1,13,20,21,1,3,19,0,59,3,1,6,3,79,78,34,0,22,22,0,5,6,0,10,1,0,0,1,32,15,1,0,13,0,1,4,19,10,0,0,27,7,32,11,38,24,17,22,0,3,2,0,17,13,0,17,9,240,64,11,0.0,0.12383361193286528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533529945441474,0.04179044808951275,0.04348257632023688,0.0,0.0,0.035537014624941736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043003618278734015,0.0,0.04885387685169256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371159379675849,0.0,0.0,0.05887651057208464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368303275203945,0.0,0.0,0.0547911835948681,0.05647198756890856,0.0,0.1251705165213946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16198845945607568,0.05828112727554774,0.06903141002426194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051118038837390335,0.0,0.0,0.07926916004594098,0.1119986918342324,0.050175568227176406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05460496224521336,0.0,0.0,0.13149378876667125,0.04179524079964298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04681261713216478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058992560279680625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221333352276234,0.0,0.0,0.03691114506893886,0.15318277786696638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442761107464248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05249986381342093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055437140630374256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524622369194255,0.038748407819110736,0.040304344663742664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036228895693725366,0.04562939080215218,0.0,0.0,0.09880079819687544,0.0,0.0,0.05316484788326936,0.0,0.05000354253363985,0.0,0.15760020723634954,0.0,0.05558247556899595,0.0,0.0,0.03347760816162284,0.16118879668859265,0.0,0.11221038359330072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328521081617321,0.09514685904473157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04427776297140102,0.08046103081345242,0.15505254625171752,0.0,0.0,0.05569973413921635,0.0,0.0,0.059860996271768975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5976121177335747,0.24270077855082375,0.10415304232280133,0.03348461149066043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986890604141327,0.0,0.07095906933631027,0.0,0.0,0.1088041764047152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623611829874897,0.0,0.04147971426087215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18861771338663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30435370940098194,0.0,0.0,0.1113670703071018,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seniorgamer78,2020/01/24,"i don’t know how I feel this feels weird sharing this with strangers and there’s very few who know this about me and those who do I have never met 
most nights recently I have began to start crying and I feel empty , this causes me to self harm but that doesn’t even help but it doesn’t make things worse 
I’m not the type to cry or anything but I’ve just been feeling lonely and empty even when I’m with people.
I don’t know how to explain it but it’s horrible 
idk any ideas on how to help please 
I have add and anxiety issues and I’m 90% sure I have autism but I’m lower on the spectrum and I don’t want to ask my mum as idk if I’m just paranoid or I’m attention seeking or it’s just nothing and everyone is like this 
idk I just don’t want to feel this way",-0.9705401069518728,1.0880818176470584,1.1671657754010702,100.45770053475937,92.58823529411764,4.267379679144385,15.962566844919785,5.852544927426893,-0.7733529411764706,599,14,147,5,22,198,87,170,0.209,0.665,0.126,-0.9169,1,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,12,6,0,0,2,0,13,0,0,5,2,46,35,22,0,3,14,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,15,11,0,0,11,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,3,5,13,3,13,32,2,9,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,5,7,88,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208497519919113,0.0,0.12608878745375796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563490178109708,0.0,0.15408681998467882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16931814498583728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3620996284960919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21772745860042195,0.0,0.0,0.15749499465503433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4166961280410111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22095414060581284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860645787405004,0.0,0.17203190337036275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717464627928564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08052396465755117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110020321385263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127121299291264,0.0,0.0,0.15467478287599992,0.0,0.15815166676526995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426719205825656,0.0,0.0,0.1809256471728891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16274236809330211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17194584953399353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11666223797880353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15534328780253273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950076785082624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359958522515541,0.19443320204340045,0.13082845571772647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679682434394172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IHaveNoHoles,2020/01/24,"Going to my first ever therapy session, any tips? I’ve had a phobia for a while and decided enough is enough and I needed to get some help.

I’ve never been to a therapist or anything like it before really, I always get super anxious just going to a physical at the doctors office...not sure really how to start things or anything really.

Anyone have any tips?",3.5124761904761925,5.518538914285713,5.8171428571428585,74.13619047619048,74.14285714285714,8.666666666666666,24.523809523809533,9.2995712137729,2.482666666666667,284,9,47,7,6,100,49,70,0.064,0.768,0.168,0.8138,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,5,0,4,1,0,1,3,12,10,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,0,3,3,7,8,3,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,6,34,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601438151958444,0.0,0.0,0.26176154148713915,0.0,0.0,0.2174272960445427,0.0,0.13457391661347667,0.0,0.3167596808277022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16377100019356738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19699302877994396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3977294219174423,0.0,0.0,0.17409291220993653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16370809256516164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20110691965838584,0.0,0.2187611980633903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290032324585844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402721942864213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427081462518796,0.14843857171397842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3698882873325994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622560558362626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813931724685109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200970886276166,0.22346323468672835,0.12786321153089086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,B4b1g1r1,2020/01/24,"Contemplating a 4th suicide attempt Last years in September 10 2019 , I tried to kill myself for the third time, I regret it, but my surviving instincts are all messed up by now, my impulses and my instincts lead me to death instead of protection, I have to repress this feeling all day, I just want to be fixed, I’m heavily medicated, so no, that hasn’t worked for me, what can I do to gain my will to live again ?",38.122804878048775,6.9992520121951225,31.787560975609754,13.212317073170764,53.26829268292683,36.21463414634146,99.07317073170731,18.243605946275586,14.069668292682927,323,14,66,7,1,107,65,82,0.23600000000000002,0.652,0.11199999999999999,-0.9195,0,0,0,0,0,2,11.0,0,0,0,5,5,4,1,1,2,0,7,1,0,1,2,10,10,3,3,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,0,1,12,0,12,8,2,9,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,48,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332520592588217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828750053847947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4001425540616269,0.0,0.0,0.29481542558948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193678485957775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3643520192752704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3956164698014821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108970520852716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455552735664866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133267534655987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26330551919559314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329084445401453
mentalhealth,ninjahampster105,2020/01/24,"I need some help I need some help. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I can’t feel emotions anymore. I’m dating this girl now and I love her and I know that I love her. I have been through a lot of stuff in my life that has given me PTSD and has made me lock down emotionally. I have cut myself off from emotions and I’m trying to get back. I can completely lock myself down now and disconnect. It worked the last time and I haven’t been able to come back since. I rarely FEEL anymore, and J want to. I want to so badly. I want to with my girlfriend most of all. I want to be taken away. How do I come back from this. How do I feel again?",-0.68906914893617,1.2335978368794327,1.2369459219858143,101.89031250000002,88.36170212765957,4.376063829787234,15.195478723404255,5.602791699666715,-1.0841031914893615,489,9,126,3,16,160,74,141,0.065,0.792,0.14300000000000002,0.813,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,1,9,5,1,0,2,0,13,3,0,3,1,30,34,10,0,6,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,7,11,0,0,5,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,5,3,26,2,18,28,5,16,0,0,0,2,8,5,0,4,9,87,33,1,0.13793074412056364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27358047014206954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959047450371708,0.31818068481595885,0.1151664099696398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23763024567424146,0.14461776096818682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4654605664950659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20922578574751874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206312092147223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18490414065742194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15160625953614829,0.1124319658294444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742456366906883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11726378620121652,0.24897576348920314,0.13051340511274842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20454779810257054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612336587114301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409773687351135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578977023766375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042852610636232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364592124602944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32542050617864765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041522446700432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15080561596487435,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dramaticlastnerve,2020/01/24,A short film on suicidal ideation that I thought might help someone else [in the gray area of being suicidal](https://youtu.be/CzE4AeLh9vE),10.061428571428577,14.14052966666667,5.362142857142857,75.32035714285716,61.85714285714286,8.009523809523811,39.07142857142857,8.841846274778883,3.937742857142858,117,6,16,2,2,30,21,21,0.19399999999999998,0.69,0.11599999999999999,-0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,1,0,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38061365321682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053937714333855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4833428598292115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3860469774970869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4983764342199581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3617129140441657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YaossiPhoenix,2020/01/24,"Parents with psychosis; do you ever get sucked into your children's fantasies? This is for all the parents who suffer psychotic symptoms that distort your view of reality. Do you ever find yourself starting to believe the whacky and bizarre fantasies your young children describe to you?

Maybe little Timmy had a nightmare and wants you to chase away the monster under his bed. How close have you been to seeing that monster there for real?

Maybe little Rosie has an imaginary friend she speaks to and you've started forming a relationship with them too?",7.494756995581738,9.523541804123717,6.236966126656848,75.0277319587629,63.94845360824743,7.192341678939616,37.56848306332843,7.447530270364453,3.1239761413843894,453,23,65,4,7,135,70,97,0.11699999999999999,0.852,0.031,-0.8343,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,8,1,0,5,3,1,0,6,0,7,1,0,1,3,14,13,4,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,2,4,7,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,11,1,13,11,2,11,0,1,2,0,19,6,1,0,5,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820558816147317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21831553876424206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505571005841461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17710478727236506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970834957838197,0.0,0.1012382666358038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884224122026385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3893415537744396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43032342518716815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205558170610581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080394210788089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441179762313614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2743067061864557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20140408635728585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429219117907972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_gotta_get_a_hat,2020/01/25,"Literally just yesterday, I started hearing songs in regular everyday background noise. I'm not sure if that makes sense but whenever there is a constant background noise it sounds like a song. It happens when I am waking up too. So, like, this morning when I was showing and the fan was going it was playing a quiet live version of Casey Jones. Right now, the kitchen fan is going and there's soe rock song I don't know...maybe its something I'm coming up with or maybe its a song that I just forgot I knew. 

   I love music but am not super into specific types, I would never ask the music snob's famous ""have you even heard of them"" type question because I know my answer is almost always ""no."" When someone asks me what type of music I'm into the answer is ""any kind!""  It's so weird too because it is accompanied with a weird buzzing. 

I've been having extremely bad anxiety and have just recently gone through some pretty traumatic stuff. Additionally, have struggled with addiction but have been sober for some time now. Oh, also, I'm in isolation a LOT and feel like I have no one and am terrified of that. Maybe that's all what sparked this? I'm just worried something in my head just snapped. 

I apologize if this doesn't fit into this sub, I don't post often and have never really gotten the hang of it. Let me know if I should remove this, or, the regs might I guess!",3.581252525252527,5.351339044444448,4.580067340067341,84.0848484848485,73.37037037037038,7.427609427609428,26.717171717171716,8.150884317080207,1.7375555555555562,1082,39,209,17,22,352,147,270,0.156,0.741,0.102,-0.9484,0,1,2,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,1,1,19,13,1,1,12,0,27,5,2,1,4,51,51,20,0,5,15,0,1,3,0,3,1,8,1,0,20,14,1,1,7,7,0,6,9,5,0,1,10,9,20,8,18,37,5,30,0,0,0,1,9,10,0,13,16,141,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458609265743304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339806166194697,0.0,0.0,0.10699920789643977,0.11133169028473272,0.0,0.0,0.09098807478035098,0.0,0.10235605621019137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25016846503319057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11171678078753128,0.16312555576027965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525620218375668,0.0,0.1445894508062754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883731394402536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765291849598741,0.09558620737153277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520823886912271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739495304191694,0.0,0.11831823048607015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13731662646630408,0.0,0.1508014733624112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393313240983304,0.22059769771953092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13681879320183613,0.0,0.19610265795708046,0.0,0.1181471846621498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375133340364395,0.1207590424953946,0.0,0.0893120350142416,0.0,0.4032579763687689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14193985483927227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20638845243144385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066583117238444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12814269119488472,0.13612193387493446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988577581012236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857152224807072,0.0,0.132110612788998,0.0,0.0,0.11426382417431892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133676661044258,0.20601039130113866,0.0,0.0,0.0947037942810294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13987602181808478,0.15316812435080576,0.0,0.0,0.12610420497558747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801941575201833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13587962808045814,0.0,0.0950471447692482,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoseliaAurin,2020/01/25,"Help with being too negative. Hi.
I hope this is allowed. 
Do any of you have good tips or tricks, that can help you think more positively?
I have heard about writing three good things down every day, but I am interested in finding ways to improve positive thinking.

I just got dumped (Long story) and could really use it. Also, I think it just generally good to try to stay positive.",2.6950000000000003,5.411099611111113,3.9811111111111153,82.55000000000003,80.66666666666667,7.488888888888887,24.277777777777786,8.472884824447931,1.949244444444445,300,11,56,7,8,98,57,72,0.077,0.569,0.354,0.9771,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,0,5,7,2,0,0,0,8,0,0,2,0,16,15,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,7,5,8,11,1,6,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,2,38,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17144004668504925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578612397975665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116542317720673,0.0,0.0,0.13825771812154505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806248577450299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19593993693005415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5394366970333905,0.1714597081743617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873895245901976,0.0,0.0,0.2129282560966885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897200387102438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733766849876633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285011397991789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142424910113147,0.4120991963206652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455503197008975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18515596156588307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17016530031299162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway97474383,2020/01/25,"My (32F) husband (34M) has trouble reaching climax due to the antidepressant cocktail he’s on. What can I do to help aside from him changing medications? First off, my husband needs all of these medications. If he comes off of them, he loses touch with reality and things get really bad, even dangerous (towards himself). 
Our sex life is suffering because of this. He is amazing and always makes sure I’m more than taken care of, but he simply does not get off and more often than not, he ends up in pain.
Realistically speaking, I know this isn’t my fault, but it really affects my self esteem to the point where I dread and even avoid sex. It’a extremely important to me that he gets off and every time he doesn’t, I feel myself shutting down a little more. This is made worse by the fact that we are trying to have a baby....

I love this man with all of my heart and can’t see myself with anyone else. How can I help him reach climax? He doesn’t have issues with getting an erection, just the end part. 
Any advice, links and books are welcomed. 

Thank you. 

TL;DR my husband cannot reach climax due to medication and I want to know what I can do in order to help him.",4.454152173913041,5.481402447826087,5.356250000000003,82.26437500000003,70.17391304347825,7.836956521739133,26.11413043478261,8.07648339933343,1.4872826086956519,913,27,181,12,16,299,137,230,0.115,0.7440000000000001,0.141,0.5351,0,1,0,0,0,0,35.0,2,1,1,2,6,15,1,2,7,0,18,9,1,4,4,36,36,12,0,3,6,3,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,11,14,1,1,4,2,0,1,7,9,0,1,2,4,25,6,31,34,6,22,0,2,1,3,28,14,0,2,6,118,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386379825989608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398559453256656,0.0,0.0,0.09315703168331567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578570283843983,0.14036113905837058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143798647515678,0.08350705629832993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396691366662758,0.0,0.14491590876632085,0.1180036582205992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987975786495192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443650312836755,0.0,0.2426627028534625,0.0,0.0,0.18095952399616247,0.0,0.11541891049990875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692656162581041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652254092992664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286283822748205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16233230068612495,0.2754619676775916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298063986126158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505708432329104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675918888924497,0.0,0.1372986923591843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532553447912786,0.0,0.0,0.12363767422211352,0.1296220454297229,0.09144103879116068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41400519054340784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015754050524398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457656636066871,0.0,0.0,0.14834544153620266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949862537838727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17551697221100146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091622791705817,0.0,0.1429091180542855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911025369719134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612081450743715,0.0,0.0,0.09100922297478843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987922815896416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09300635323685533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079950024905874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13960321575723195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mike_nedersling,2020/01/25,"First time post So to sum it all up quickly I have back issues I’m a 22 (M) who plays college basketball at a small NAIA school

Right now I can’t workout let alone play the game  I love and as I was doing my back exercises today and I just absolutely lost it. And I wanna kill myself all of a sudden. Like why Live when the thing I know I’m here for, what I love the most outside of my dog and family and friends, the biggest joy in my life, I can’t do, Nd I can see everyone getting better and I’m worse off? What’s the point? I know this is a lil dramatic and could be the heat of the moment but what I want to do for the rest of my life I can’t right now and it seems like no one understands and i just don’t know what to do. It just doesn’t fair, and I know I can fix it I know I can do it, but I’m just exhausted, and no one listens. So here I am turning to the internet 
Maybe this should be in a different thread but I figure  with the whole don’t wanna keep going thing this is a good place to start",-0.9322974812797824,0.9585554911504416,1.7929203539823002,97.6901837985024,89.22123893805309,5.246834581347855,16.656909462219197,6.67199483983844,-0.3683718175629682,775,18,196,10,26,268,116,226,0.079,0.789,0.132,0.8542,1,1,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,3,14,13,1,0,16,0,24,6,0,0,2,36,46,18,1,5,7,0,0,2,1,1,4,1,0,0,16,12,0,1,8,5,0,1,8,3,0,3,2,2,25,10,20,39,5,25,0,1,1,2,6,11,0,2,14,139,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455655502722934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161457838090181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12430346324318844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11221630287840764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14684295705138098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342998301828083,0.0,0.0,0.13249633648539136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955022892086707,0.0,0.0,0.10858719231000442,0.0,0.07343063469254194,0.0,0.0798767821971649,0.1178851636706958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14669580743991276,0.0,0.12492569984058845,0.15549576169288046,0.0,0.3862080811498864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14372005909573715,0.19854670331748198,0.13732950438002886,0.0,0.12410663743094075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534249653578163,0.0,0.25370047955590114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411995599879551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19047819833985125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14684295705138098,0.0,0.1328634801933644,0.0,0.13460632651573828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400547933296293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422422840518839,0.111998720249456,0.12794980458518515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948074085539747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867479605871145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195478691259557,0.0,0.13322326173613672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287608447008735,0.0,0.14631563510142145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289897108642383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682289153537796,0.15691704839695855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432306253251285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NYKid72,2020/01/25,"How to help my girlfriend? How do I help my girlfriend?

Hi. I’ll try to keep this short. This girl I work with and me started dating 7 months ago. When she first began to work there, she had a boyfriend in jail but they broke up and then we became a couple a week later. She is 19 and I’m 25, so a lot of her issues probably are due to age. Anyways, everything was good in the relationship. We spent all our time together and loved being around each other. She was with me every night and pretty much all the time because we worked together. Other than her snooping  through my phone in fear that I was cheating on her, there was no problem. She said she was so in love with me and i was and still am in love with her. However, as soon as the ex got out of jail I figured out she spent a whole day and night with him, while ignoring me and saying she was out with family. I told her what I knew and broke up with her. She denied ever seeing him, but felt things were different and it wouldn’t work because I don’t trust her anymore. We kept hanging out though and she expressed that she loved me and wanted to work things out. After about a week, I just didn’t see the relationship going anywhere because my trust was fucked up, so I told her I was going to Miami for three days and then she flipped out. She felt like I abandoned her and didn’t love her anymore and went back to her ex.

After two weeks, the ex already fucked up and she was calling me back. We started talking again for two weeks and the first time we hung out I realized two other guys (one another ex boyfriend and one I’m not sure who he is) were texting her. Once we started hanging out again constantly, I no longer saw any other guys texting her except for the ex she had broke up with who blows up her phone all day everyday on fake numbers because she blocked him. She acted like she wanted to be in a committed relationship again, but I wasn’t willing to commit because she had just broke up with her ex and I wanted to make sure there was no mix feelings. Now it has been three months since then and we are always together just like we were before. I asked her last night if she wanted to be committed again and she said no because she was afraid I would leave her because I didn’t want to commit for so long (still not owning up to the fact that she saw her ex in October and that me leaving was really her fault) and I told her I didn’t want to commit to someone who likely had mixed feelings for two men, but now she seems to hate him so I’m more comfortable with commitment.Then she understood and said she wanted to be in a relationship again, so now we are a couple again.

I love this girl to death. She  is my first love and took my virginity. I know, a late bloomer I am. But it seems like she can’t be alone. She always has to be in a relationship. She even said when she is alone she starts having bad thoughts and she tried to kill herself twice before. She has no friends, doesn’t like to go out in public unless it’s for work due to social anxiety, and just likes to be in bed all day with me. I’m not sure why she decided to see her ex that day, but maybe it’s because younger guys will say stuff like “we will be together forever” where I’m older and more realistic and would say stuff like “if we are still together in three months...” which she would point out and it would make her feel insecure. Or maybe it’s because we are interracial (I’m white and she is black) and she has expressed concern about how her mom would act towards me. She definitely has low self esteem and I believe abandonment issues and that’s why me leaving for Miami triggered her so much. All her past boyfriends have been terrible to her. The first one cheated on her, the second one was physically abusive and almost killed her, and I’m not sure what this last one did. I know I’m taking a huge risk of getting my heart broken again, but I love her and I just keep in mind that she probably does love me but is very damaged at the moment so anything can happen. We even got matching tattoos with our initials while we were not “official” which was her idea. I know, it’s crazy lol. It’s just so sad that she is this way because she is absolutely beautiful (she models on the side) and is funny too. What type of issues do you guys think she is dealing with and what caused them? How can I help?",3.2629945619736063,4.615109282976324,4.050982658001196,89.25204133231648,73.4193912063134,7.201863518800982,24.769033092380127,7.724431198458867,1.0769234829895886,3422,104,735,44,68,1094,309,887,0.155,0.701,0.14300000000000002,-0.8939,2,2,0,0,0,0,76.0,17,1,2,10,50,53,7,4,24,1,79,13,1,8,16,170,155,75,3,16,24,9,5,9,3,9,0,7,1,8,39,80,0,7,18,0,2,9,19,26,0,18,53,19,147,27,97,85,13,122,0,9,7,12,161,44,2,7,77,530,186,7,0.0,0.05266499070342079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03940150178576144,0.0,0.044509416861634135,0.09207185702837647,0.04905075753452153,0.0,0.07397053003372163,0.0,0.0,0.030226955600140687,0.046608823821890535,0.03400348863232673,0.0,0.08816325325497228,0.0,0.0,0.03657787448032778,0.03956917953805168,0.041553967942327484,0.0,0.0,0.06835732653407277,0.03711319511713195,0.27095797680725625,0.0,0.07564592908977519,0.05007898636776763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045387565938275067,0.0,0.0,0.0456615352922166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04803375519616807,0.0,0.0,0.09836430858158253,0.0,0.14333016726670794,0.04582513610544666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0464399156324014,0.0,0.0,0.03889776276532544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871650693904886,0.040206813405608624,0.0374503375650406,0.0,0.039948042310759865,0.0,0.0419027157416262,0.05001766686052836,0.06742449827193475,0.0,0.08535633558538837,0.0,0.0,0.15123374403245518,0.0,0.0,0.03434131367888118,0.0821850713487222,0.023222853505749836,0.0,0.07578445233010557,0.037281849706032315,0.0711001135734861,0.0,0.0,0.17604664173638038,0.039306248738894996,0.0,0.0,0.043884346898257334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052672473098850266,0.08938001260949577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05017769554173552,0.0,0.1391801362067262,0.0,0.07901691817450454,0.09835282807178324,0.0,0.07328429390948586,0.07246400207023719,0.05014059281806029,0.14119573948514375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19544054589948254,0.0,0.0,0.039336111215548926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03778908953232698,0.3610539515394661,0.0,0.059340323958952064,0.0,0.08931031879014001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044880984389953284,0.05205832340987684,0.10643669538876137,0.0,0.06535049953568313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251375874280782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047336908766573434,0.15059951866842566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04243175635989279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04201882701564031,0.0,0.0,0.04522077933152921,0.09584743288227933,0.042531846750944007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028475272506150763,0.0,0.0,0.23860883634615498,0.0,0.0,0.16912533406006694,0.1060432773003776,0.0,0.0,0.10626068605050776,0.08092969863088663,0.04637017182950675,0.0,0.0,0.03676880760741014,0.0,0.0,0.04531032486297154,0.0376616322315028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12584538762065192,0.0,0.10649147884655492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176731632766556,0.0,0.0,0.16757124333006662,0.0,0.033420239399155144,0.035726554145472204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05906009868184589,0.028481229374450107,0.04367107773740597,0.035287671025009765,0.07775599456010641,0.0,0.0,0.12741924246907824,0.04938465646126574,0.060356128979685564,0.0,0.17368149720486772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036675215215113736,0.1835208790669842,0.03528167727375497,0.14261775222235273,0.0,0.0,0.0412048201452211,0.08021691338045356,0.0496259039940906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19415712373201394,0.0,0.0,0.15787705321800236,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kOan__,2020/01/25,"Need help with someone I met who is beginning to worry me This will be a little long, but I need to explain. I am going to graduate school soon, so I had been going to lots of information sessions for the specific schools I liked.


One of these was a class visit session that had a small social gathering the evening prior. At this party, an older looking guy (30-40?) approached me and a group of students I was speaking with. I introduced myself and he introduced himself as 'Jerry'. Immediately it appeared as though he was high or drunk, just because of his slurred speech / stuttering and how droopy his eyes were. But when the waiter came by to offer us drinks he just asked for 'more tea', so he must not have been drunk.


I went home soon after, and remember thinking how inappropriate the behavior would have been (if it was that he was drunk/high), considering he was presumably also an applicant for this top school, and he may not want to be seen that way at an official event. I thought maybe the next morning during the class session he may be sober and that would have been that. Jerry arrived early and sat at the front seat.  He participated often and asked questions in a way that was too extra, and seemed inappropriate at times because his timing was off and interrupted the speaker. 


Nothing else happened and I left when the event was over, but fast forward to a couple months later and I get a call from an Unknown Number. I was in a meeting for work and I didn't answer it, but I later noticed I had a voicemail. It was Jerry, saying that he needed to speak to me and to call him back when he could. I tried to but because it was from an Unknown Number, my phone wouldn't allow me to call him back. Over the next few days I kept receiving voicemails from Jerry, seemingly rambling about random things. In one of them, he even spoke to me in spanish (my native language, he must have remembered me mentioning this to him, and figured I wasn't responding and if he spoke spanish I would understand him?).


Nothing else happened over the Holiday break but this week, I got a call from an IL number. I answered it, and it turned out to be Jerry. He spoke to me very excitedly for what seemed like 20 mins and I couldn't get a word in (like how did you get my number). He also addressed me as [my full name], and asked me if I lived in [State] (I was born there, but didn't say it). By this point I'm sure this guy has some sort of mental health issuse so I am being kind and responsive, I humored him for about a half hour random things he wanted to say, and then he told me he was trying to improve at the GRE so he could get into these schools. I gave him some pointers and then, after a while, I asked him how he got his hands on so much of my information. He tried to deflect but then he told me he got it off some website he couldn't tell me about but that if I gave him my email he can 'download a report and send it to me'.


After a while I told him I had to go (I actually did, I was at work again), and he said he would call me again to continue the conversation some other time. Yesterday I got a call from him (again, during work hours), and then left me a voicemail telling me he had found a picture of me and somebody and had a question to ask me. I know this sounds like the beginning of a horror movie, but I'm genuinely concerned for this guy. I looked up the # he's been calling me with online, and found an IL number with several complaints, including (paraphrasing) - ""some guy called rambling about random nonsensical things"", more than a couple of them with similar comments.


Unsure how to feel about the whole thing, but it is clear to me that the guy needs help and I don't know what to do--any thoughts appreciated.",6.6867811665105314,5.910508929634641,6.921244925575103,79.19041393428405,65.25169147496618,9.798702335102876,32.48051767808195,8.986495653885253,2.5111552756670483,2925,100,590,41,39,947,300,739,0.042,0.873,0.085,0.9862,0,0,1,0,0,0,94.0,1,1,2,4,35,9,0,0,45,0,62,7,2,6,4,122,122,70,0,21,20,0,2,4,0,10,1,12,2,5,39,37,4,1,23,4,0,12,9,1,0,3,55,18,83,8,88,48,13,89,0,0,4,0,107,30,0,24,49,416,122,16,0.0,0.0,0.05494092406401865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004658158230225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0382861016441137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631656759288037,0.0,0.0,0.08658283640682621,0.0,0.10296033227981843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4599108122906362,0.06439248916833637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990233927380131,0.12459031489396526,0.0,0.036309004619806684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055152812749367564,0.0,0.0,0.0940632716908327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743715702829586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02846709879631022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346063965159568,0.0,0.0,0.11765823082538447,0.0,0.09599019111737493,0.0,0.18011381703090515,0.0,0.0,0.2787305025349856,0.09957225295022076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059844534635781474,0.0,0.0,0.07547374365643783,0.11896861363545032,0.0564737427056037,0.0,0.11088881382895856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058628048230663414,0.061882291701309995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234077599402045,0.0,0.0,0.11002183620729472,0.05642764261894236,0.04971415355100769,0.04982395092000788,0.09455606337403348,0.0,0.0,0.04786446051703765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656116990907915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056737411560752474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04493832361887744,0.0,0.04138716284919418,0.16698369246456934,0.0,0.0,0.11975191238482935,0.0,0.0,0.10804321949842964,0.06409820949872817,0.0,0.0,0.0763010149691305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053221935525645456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613833321622125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755441976351767,0.0,0.05355443181307574,0.13431665918013572,0.0,0.2279154410169666,0.0,0.1537609034531016,0.0,0.06360325897588097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05739101635572806,0.047703020402485835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05306232076127094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984178027060742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14961354171135996,0.03607492786254789,0.05531471125575524,0.08939222179829989,0.09848738822885393,0.0,0.0,0.16139190903381592,0.0,0.11467252538744205,0.06123850661776111,0.0,0.0586105473560419,0.067722270498383,0.0,0.0,0.04645360373437854,0.0664146940586364,0.08937703817393453,0.045160665781824594,0.0,0.0,0.05219089719707056,0.0,0.0628572202120791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296176089427358,0.057175638286790426,0.0,0.15997633335589914,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Teavangelion,2020/01/25,"Where do I even belong? (Sorry, it’s long) I’m not asking for a diagnosis, just some feedback.
Please delete this if it’s inappropriate, mods.

The concept of Adverse Childhood Events has only come to my attention recently, and after doing some searching, I realized...wow, I might have had some.  A few.  Like, one every couple of years, right into adulthood.  It took me an hour to document them, and I haven’t even gotten to 20 and beyond (35F).

Thing is, none of them were brought on by abuse or neglect.  I never went without things I needed.  I had a good family, all told.  Just...bad luck, unfortunate things happening over and over that caused me fear and avoidance.  I *perceived* them as a trauma, sometimes for good reason.  But they don’t seem to fit any of the communities.  Hell, even the ACE test asks about nothing but abuse and neglect situations—don’t get me wrong, those are tragic and awful, but what about medical trauma, or someone who’s never had anything but shit luck from the get-go?

For instance, being in a car wreck at age ten.  Our van hit a patch of ice and spun out and slammed into a highway guard rail.  Nobody was seriously injured, but for a long time afterward I was terrified of riding somewhere when there was snow and ice on the roads.  I didn’t want to do it, but I didn’t get a choice, sat and just oscillated with terror in the backseat until I could finally escape.

I choked on candy, twice, had to go to the ER the second time.  I had a van bench seat dropped on my head.  Being separated from family for the first time to go to school made me cry every day for weeks.  I was in a car fire.  I *hated* getting stomach flu and freaked out every single time it happened.  I panicked when it happened to other family members, afraid I would catch it too.

And when I was thirteen my body suddenly decided I had emetophobia.  I started having panic attacks that still happen regularly to this day.  Just had one right now.  I know I’m not in any danger, but they’re still goddamn terrifying.  And there’s no escaping them.  They can strike any time.

And now I’m wondering how all this has affected me as an adult.  I have quit more jobs than I’ve kept because the pressure of working eventually threw me into a downward spiral of panic attacks.  Now I’m in a high-stress job (THAT was a mistake) I can’t quit because I have no money and no one to support me.  My boss is great and literally gives me half the workload other people do, and sometimes it’s still too much.  

My siblings, who experienced almost no adverse events, have gone on to successful careers and “normal” lives.  But me, it’s like my stress response is just broken.  Like the pathways were laid in my brain a long, long time ago, and now that’s just how it reacts, regardless of the actual severity of the situation.  All the panic, all the time.

I take meds and practice mindfulness, but it’s still frustrating and exhausting.  I wonder what it’s doing to my future health.  I’m in the process of looking for a suitable therapist, but I guess I just wanted some feedback that I’m not imagining this or making it up.  If I belong in another community, that’s fine too.  I just can’t seem to find much help for people who’ve been screwed over from the start, through the direct fault of absolutely no one.

Thanks for reading.",3.497915360501569,5.527399042319749,4.673498432601882,82.21679937304076,74.25078369905957,7.398620689655173,26.803761755485894,8.238735603445708,1.8748648275862057,2591,97,487,44,55,851,307,638,0.23199999999999998,0.6920000000000001,0.076,-0.9989,2,1,0,0,2,0,99.0,1,0,6,6,32,42,8,9,37,1,44,11,5,9,6,103,91,45,0,10,26,0,1,3,0,2,5,0,0,1,33,29,0,5,11,1,1,12,18,30,1,9,28,3,55,12,74,57,14,87,1,3,1,1,15,30,3,18,47,342,88,11,0.0,0.1581735121746612,0.065137482615608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05916904037358221,0.0,0.06683957118208958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13617500921664208,0.0699922402317977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492881321311575,0.0,0.12480277631197405,0.15187345088503865,0.0,0.0,0.05573270156600396,0.0813792507525503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414319085602915,0.0,0.07451405905752694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856970173155295,0.0,0.0574984301790341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05329371649015352,0.07385659787067278,0.07332074044739857,0.08609528134098499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226143213636754,0.0,0.16871696013812335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18877530300443893,0.07511128296466263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731203648051556,0.06100745848089855,0.05677674137371341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949457704863902,0.06403180882795867,0.11380513727601757,0.1119719386561661,0.0,0.07359110674589495,0.07353164737035789,0.0,0.2361039973766877,0.0,0.0,0.06590090670933793,0.06850382287198092,0.07095116074012825,0.0,0.0,0.044740507637145134,0.07052407776626053,0.0,0.0,0.06573440751226467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247634341942838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036683553913392515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783070041203636,0.0,0.058940668870169126,0.23628337471071906,0.056052423936750986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315960234784883,0.04455553551232272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414319085602915,0.067242685244319,0.0,0.0708102356182644,0.06739755230179836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098136521965209,0.04949360404061854,0.10296202544456837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539993547165515,0.06404755154475382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18092364192177549,0.050765690343670726,0.0,0.2349470236679237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255082823866413,0.0,0.0,0.07327045582309505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199174584161656,0.06676715268549707,0.0,0.0,0.06862918098322747,0.06590667314585655,0.0,0.0,0.11400671533149695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755364207094752,0.0,0.12153172820035014,0.0,0.07540747168740694,0.06851698109374049,0.0,0.07502877320095408,0.0,0.0,0.056556286868387186,0.0,0.13203311243990995,0.07472014079284403,0.09449069811402823,0.0,0.213223636181004,0.0,0.1529217128498711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574607567712792,0.0,0.0,0.0501870082276403,0.0,0.0,0.0614535935277716,0.0,0.07750083751841234,0.13303538716778215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724535158161819,0.0,0.0,0.06378161542350674,0.07416069437861024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874068471481259,0.0,0.053542093300891526,0.0,0.0,0.06187707463576481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06434374026749816,0.14477308033114958,0.048594132085719936,0.0,0.0,0.04741663800892935,0.07297965084839772,0.0,0.042984225140590304
mentalhealth,chxrley,2020/01/25,"please help i was wondering if it’s possible to not enjoy YOUR life, but to enjoy life? is that a thing? like i don’t enjoy how my life is right now, i have mental health, i don’t have any real life friends, no job, i’m suffering a lot of the time. but i do enjoy the meaning of life, knowing my life could/can get better etc etc.",1.1204166666666635,2.394732430555557,3.3483333333333363,92.43,78.8611111111111,6.466666666666668,20.333333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.29348333333333354,253,6,60,3,6,87,47,72,0.23399999999999999,0.589,0.177,-0.6908,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,2,8,0,0,4,0,8,7,0,1,0,10,13,4,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,0,7,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,8,7,4,12,3,3,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,3,3,37,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006244850145804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14314173975018216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292227618061064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3610074530498022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504365700119285,0.0,0.08455909856901364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720372596998808,0.0,0.0,0.10848355757938688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16060954365788713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894763701509921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6859097838390679,0.07907094325091052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375977050282023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763003334330347,0.0,0.0,0.16310510001927647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776609192192852,0.0,0.1824597304233335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18421888970034592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382176323009911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752487209845636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437509200024023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17551766425433016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ssseabreeze,2020/01/25,"Do I have ""proper"" anxiety? (Advice needed) TW;; RAPE, DOMESTIC ABUSE 
B.INFO;; 19, F, UK

i don't really know how to write this because i don't want to seem like im crying for help. 

for the past year and bit, i've had terrible anxieties about everything. i stress about the littlest things like what if my period doesn't come and what if I get told off and to the biggest things like what if my boyfriend hates me and moves onto someone else? or I'm not pretty enough. i grew up in a very old fashioned household with stigmas towards mental health being ""a phase"" and ""will get over it"" and i never get the chance to vent how i'm feeling.

this bit can get triggering so i apologise in advance but I did warn before. 

it wouldn't be surprising that i probably have anxiety because I'm only 19 but my life has been not the most enjoyable. unfortunately i was raped when I was 16 by the first boyfriend. with the same boyfriend at the age of 16, he was very abusive to me and he did a lot of physical violence to me with the extreme of breaking my collarbone and dislocating my knee. i felt so ashamed that i couldn't tell anyone and that lead me to thinking that everyone found out and that they all hated me because i let it happen to myself.  

i'm always on edge, thinking that i won't get into my university, that my family hate me, my boyfriend will leave me for someone new because i was not good enough or pretty enough.

it's driving me insane and i feel like i can't go a day without worrying about everything and it's like i have a constant war going on in my brain. 

i don't know what to do and a bit of me is too scared to tell anyone and too scared to actually get diagnosed because i'm terrified because i don't want to admit it to myself.",4.826161899897857,5.047834379213484,6.001246169560777,80.85820735444334,68.97191011235954,9.394075587334015,30.78855975485189,9.339509955726095,2.548015730337079,1373,52,282,26,22,461,176,356,0.261,0.6890000000000001,0.05,-0.9979,0,0,0,0,1,0,35.0,0,0,1,3,10,19,6,4,15,0,30,7,2,4,2,56,62,26,1,8,11,0,3,5,0,4,3,0,0,0,21,20,0,0,10,0,0,8,14,11,0,1,11,3,43,8,41,43,10,34,0,0,0,2,9,14,0,8,16,190,64,1,0.0,0.2032752123236828,0.083710827602392,0.0,0.0,0.08382514735986163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137747010616795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19686891460041173,0.0,0.0,0.11996149459036524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137513528282818,0.0,0.07299413752743487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809550786270196,0.0,0.0,0.09576104726872656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389357068846816,0.0,0.0926998339484246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942274649987964,0.05532227347689738,0.0,0.0,0.08706689289717573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165982784575232,0.0,0.0,0.2659071150066402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196834754003644,0.15419060507130636,0.0,0.0808676060277433,0.0,0.08674788203057686,0.061282655834779584,0.08236414270440735,0.0,0.0,0.07296609905863424,0.0,0.09405550141014336,0.0,0.0,0.2689052298742619,0.0,0.09750373972334532,0.07194984574753849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758567119383104,0.0,0.0,0.2540758048453425,0.0,0.09118222176248653,0.0,0.0,0.05749784565299016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265924684197736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428705360348807,0.0,0.0,0.0908307192934329,0.0,0.08771787526758898,0.060590341619580004,0.20954368533453524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292876250050756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644804867558882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117265747732443,0.0,0.0636062431168088,0.06616034282784901,0.08284876025708916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001374644554218,0.0,0.0,0.0652410529518553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188859589757544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17454220341221735,0.09248747132390428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054954125951137314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17176543162425745,0.0,0.0,0.07809268288457412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536556801894435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826295572843242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995444389931492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397945712188348,0.10993124409599116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196834754003644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14155821657412287,0.1011928557686778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826907570347981,0.0,0.0,0.0871157535338358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05524077560074697
mentalhealth,throwaway897688392,2020/01/25,"Bipolar Poetry I feel like a hero who distracted a monster from a city of innocent bystanders leading them to a barely habited continent. It’s just us here. Wreck it. Uproot my trees. 
It’s private. It feels dangerous and raw under a haze of indifference. 
This is mine. This is home. This lazy urge to gut myself. 

I find my way through the thick film of my own volatile rage to find myself slinking slowly as my skin sloughs off like silt. The bright, heated surety of indignation dims and I feel my consciousness move, fly past rational thought and inward with loathing. 
I don’t have anything out there anymore. I’ll sleep in the hollow husk of my torso. 

I strap my arms to themselves and keel upward, bruised knees at angry jaw and feel my hips scream while the remaining strings of skin on my back stretch over resistant spine. The urge to bite is only so I can spit myself back out.",2.973809523809525,5.668505904761907,3.291666666666668,88.0866666666667,79.23809523809524,6.352380952380952,26.0,7.594959193182576,1.5448785714285722,704,28,132,11,18,217,115,168,0.159,0.754,0.08800000000000001,-0.9169,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,1,2,6,8,2,1,10,0,6,11,10,1,0,18,11,8,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,8,8,0,0,8,1,0,2,1,4,0,0,1,9,21,4,23,10,1,17,0,0,1,0,3,10,0,0,6,81,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203461361323393,0.0,0.0,0.18283792877662133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34169049398752943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4493702194924245,0.15872779749162527,0.0,0.0,0.4061430311736565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22286797064182365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21709507982878756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361456910720409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689804154213144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120991051945757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223437631331139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638872605989006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672591592151307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17635876573331016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunnybee_19,2020/01/25,"I'm struggling to stay happy Hi friends! I (18f) struggle with anxiety and depression, like a lot of people do unfortunately. I can't afford to delve into it more through doctors & therapy so I can't say what's going on with me for sure. I do have some medical issues which my doctors for that have explained will have an affect on my mental health, so I know that's part of it. I'm just frustrated because most of the time I feel so low, tired, and depressed. It's hard for me to enjoy anything or have the energy to try. But then every once in a while I'll get this HUGE burst of energy and excitement and I don't understand why I'm not happy all the time because life is pretty awesome a lot of the time. I'm starting to feel that feeling of happiness and excitement again which is great because I feel more productive, relaxed, and at peace. I'm just nervous because I know it won't last and I'll plateau back into my low state, and I really really don't want that to happen. I want to feel good and encouraged and confident, but I can't really control when it hits me. Does anyone have any advice on how I can keep my spirits up and not let myself fall back into that hole?",4.814931129476585,5.0585829173553725,6.110264462809919,79.99024517906341,69.0,9.428539944903582,30.18292011019284,9.3871,2.5436503581267207,934,34,188,18,15,316,129,242,0.102,0.721,0.17800000000000002,0.9478,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,10,21,1,3,8,0,18,6,0,3,2,44,40,21,0,2,7,0,6,1,1,2,6,1,0,0,14,16,0,2,9,1,0,2,8,8,0,0,0,7,21,13,28,36,8,27,1,4,0,0,5,12,0,5,12,125,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093192402161288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121239660319175,0.0,0.07607625106108214,0.0,0.08558116048357517,0.0,0.0,0.07822294297623543,0.0,0.0920604641452285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17204409216938432,0.0,0.2727825764960035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254730614784095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19270899831388824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290098236678104,0.0978992395064602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425630952086501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.282827196033118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643141028697507,0.0,0.0584480837908113,0.0,0.06357898005850213,0.09383225342893757,0.0,0.1233383910499357,0.0,0.0,0.09892733118368036,0.357266912434611,0.1002146199212062,0.0,0.0,0.11891385244455413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167644659604117,0.0,0.09943626120734124,0.0,0.0,0.12296296978639445,0.09118995785272667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439587975263908,0.07901793577352928,0.05465461664986635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19021778446107476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126984628257978,0.11273985548527035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913917509326072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114560597465313,0.0,0.07755740299375605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138132270782572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150026627425792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896446705785051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918300994446953,0.11923981243591865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339041325788336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543728044296083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12793446491122898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19569898609409608,0.12857948551125406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595320021762697,0.0,0.0,0.11646186276505426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319690624633389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094635600100033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wantegg,2020/01/25,"I can feel myself going down again So poor mental health has been a part of my life for a very long time. Im usually able to control it with small acts of self care, or the support of those around me.
I'm recently a dad, which is amazing in itself. I cannot express the love i have for a person I have known for mere weeks.
But; that doesn't mean I'm not struggling. I've got very used to being able to have time to myself. Ive used alcohol and drugs in the past as a release from my thoughts. Now my life is to support this vulnerable human. I cannot plan a sesh or spontaneously go out for coffee. I love them. But I cannot do right in my partners eyes. She's tells me every attempt to look after the baby is wrong. I'm drained and I wish I wasn't 

I also hate my job (I work in a call centre) and I'm due to be placed on a formal plan for my ability to perform.
I do try but I have no empathy for people who complain over the increase of a bill and repeatedly tell me I'm worthless. 

This is mearly to vent. I am sorry to take up your time but I've had a drink at my friend's house while he plays Ps4.",0.6649494949494965,2.208876843621397,2.99427048260382,93.26830808080808,80.97530864197532,5.735054246165358,20.51047512158624,6.574015621080383,0.1047218106995884,855,23,203,8,22,294,142,243,0.102,0.807,0.091,-0.5365,1,0,3,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,1,6,5,13,1,1,15,0,23,9,1,3,0,22,45,14,0,1,7,1,1,0,2,0,5,0,0,4,8,7,2,1,4,2,2,4,7,5,0,0,5,3,30,8,35,38,2,32,0,1,2,2,18,14,0,2,14,128,38,2,0.25130603397477164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13428486163690825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004846722876278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185782510537996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830577919363284,0.0,0.1281116251532327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409305430442544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230921200444621,0.14571760751269833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586808618205727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353394083954787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707920922866893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282301045768833,0.0,0.10049619630636468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12405634025058672,0.0,0.13356328125761918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498671110644734,0.0,0.0,0.1357268205123487,0.0,0.1246912307813928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17750488379875398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119896596398568,0.105516887748411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22681350730487415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687297194344214,0.0,0.0,0.12662868721828302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606997260022186,0.11995002264969085,0.08711198078874413,0.10971536777058326,0.1312806588704299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406719538212453,0.0,0.0,0.10730698995080687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310835006225852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065826515335866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135981555013918,0.0,0.0,0.28517910924333256,0.0,0.0,0.09447543106360534,0.0,0.21965255045577325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975445990978664,0.21980785404042052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853101504537772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21704772577702386,0.13838904608707905,0.20735379692618006,0.0,0.0,0.10079127095413516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14449476837001307,0.0,0.0,0.09147689288702644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738184873463946,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,T3adrink3r,2020/01/25,"I’m losing hope I’m a 21 year old female. I’ve been diagnosed by several therapists with so many different things. Anxiety, depression, OCD, Bipolar. 
My moods swing so often, you could put me on a spinner wheel. I’m up high for a few days, then I’m down for the rest of the week. I’ve got anger issues. I become upset at the slightest inconvenience and I don’t know how to handle it. I’ve been trying to change it, but I get angry so often that I’m losing hope. It’s taking a toll on my relationships. I know my boyfriend is losing his patience with me, but I’m trying. It’s so hard to find a therapist and help. It feels like everywhere I turn, I just reach a dead end. I have so much anxiety that it’s eating away at me. 
I just don’t know what to do anymore. I’m not suicidal, but I am depressed. I’m tired of my messed up mental health issues.",0.07338095238095121,2.2414686555555576,2.765079365079366,90.50500000000004,87.44444444444444,6.095238095238094,19.12698412698413,7.447530270364453,0.5830317460317462,658,19,145,12,21,229,102,180,0.23399999999999999,0.669,0.09699999999999999,-0.9754,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,3,10,12,1,1,9,0,9,5,0,1,0,21,27,12,2,3,6,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,10,4,1,0,5,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,3,2,18,3,19,23,3,16,0,5,0,0,4,9,0,4,7,85,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19248210215618866,0.0,0.1247654946742175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819863931169225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13894256201686794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330857976529403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044565099620242,0.0,0.0,0.08113429829569317,0.0,0.21671260876971613,0.12769018364635,0.0,0.13144022781801576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873068524053846,0.0,0.0,0.1114265495237918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361116504121611,0.08987564983076249,0.0,0.0,0.1149841723624179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572830966235595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061834737125852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269723733717832,0.0,0.0,0.13372562468588786,0.0,0.0,0.08432493943904086,0.1329206774957728,0.0,0.24990698357314126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626170262030769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20741864311709884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146233263175909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4222333485624288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127547280098265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267826017897626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248169844863208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201196725719042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646952216008295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506828934395498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212468340463216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13761106664419973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459026401186484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921403343572826,0.08357974729265134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14459519785383895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082768638296913,0.13684052523978732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009137806762098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101477549631265
mentalhealth,Zettoraius,2020/01/25,"i want to calm down  I try not even think the word promise and I end up worrying that I may have made a promise to an other God.

 Sometimes, I am so frustrated because I cant ignore ocd that tells me that maybe the promise is valid and is suggesting me to do the compulsion. 

 For a second, my system generates new thoughts without my will that are about changing the never made promise to an other God from ""must do the compulsion"" to ""must not do the compulsion"" and I feel relieved and maybe, I act as if the new thoughts without my will matter more, than the previous one that created the compulsion. 

 The new thoughts without my will pop up, in a second and I do not know what I am thinking at that second. I know that getting relief from these thoughts without my will that help me not obey the compulsion, are still ocd and I should not fall in the trap. 

 I always fall in the same trap no matter how much I remind myself never allow these thoughts without my will to relieve me. but they are so fast and I cant confirm if they are 100% without my will.

ocd: maybe the thoughts without your will are semi-intentional because you allow them on purpose to help you not obey the ocd compulsion and maybe you act as if they matter and that makes them valid.

 I try not to even think the word promise and I end up worrying. sometimes, these new thoughts without my will are accompanied by scary thoughts without my will about punishments.

ocd: maybe if your thoughts without your will are valid, you will be punished because these thoughts without your will that you allowed to relieve you,  maybe they were asking punishment from an other God.

  I am so confused and I do not know what to think. I have prayed about it many times that no matter what I do not make promises and they are traps from my ocd.

 and I am getting more worried when I cant remember what exactly the thoughts without my will were but I know they caused me anxiety.",5.31818181818182,6.275372550802139,5.199480213903744,84.43027914438504,68.14438502673798,8.123037433155082,32.874438502673804,8.238735603445708,2.3965526417112297,1530,67,296,20,25,474,128,374,0.13,0.78,0.091,-0.9528,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,10,8,0,11,17,4,1,23,0,45,0,0,11,5,89,73,26,0,8,27,0,1,0,0,17,0,0,0,0,23,13,0,1,21,0,0,4,28,6,0,4,15,1,59,11,43,40,4,26,1,0,0,0,23,9,0,6,12,241,82,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04676302552482568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042992959658980916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253955224219668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027772664044707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057733033395846366,0.059452305077521125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995533006955326,0.0,0.0,0.07423933589410839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028416483629824605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058724515871582665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533954957758922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354452708290968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635587845757864,0.07502807084602113,0.056978129461904725,0.33876361696824603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04131357550708502,0.0,0.08669003806910132,0.21711381391578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03808267499128384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366381251312457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116676749875988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04488151106670602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04912140677719782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14404314319323158,0.0,0.4907830418714322,0.03277075845083024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631242330614685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03314830359076968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6500992499959072,0.0,0.0,0.17122193599987892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,7300-3651-5930-1632,2020/01/25,"Looking for positive content Hello, I’m trying to beat depression and I need your suggestions! 
I noticed that most of the content i watch on youtube by default is negative. True crime, horror etc. I’m convinced it has a subconscious effect on my mood. 
If you know something that would make recovering easier (comedy, science, anything) please comment.  Everything is appreciated!",4.9471428571428575,8.531718000000001,5.870158730158732,65.44428571428574,83.28571428571428,9.14920634920635,37.15873015873015,9.150863307647796,5.25413015873016,306,19,39,10,9,100,54,63,0.183,0.59,0.22699999999999998,0.3578,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,1,9,10,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,6,2,6,9,2,2,0,1,2,0,5,2,0,2,0,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665328593304712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789649216751954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3612215929615529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910903406229322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800079672220898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27198499203508564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161982679841356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401594178329408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687495096112979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35553260579665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24934539773356446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21989921316677544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23008128829079005,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pjenko11,2020/01/25,MH inconveniences When your spiralling under covers & hyperventilating & your breathe is unbearably hot so keep needing to move. At least let me fall in peace pls world,6.628505747126436,10.132190931034485,5.6765517241379335,71.58195402298853,70.72413793103449,8.004597701149425,30.356321839080447,8.841846274778883,2.945749425287357,143,6,22,3,3,43,27,29,0.0,0.8490000000000001,0.151,0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,4,3,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,12,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7562412542708111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31019023219882297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35685658402892545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3709114362944321,0.0,0.25876489338501546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dadquestionman,2020/01/25,"Why am I always of what might happen? Hello.  Whenever someone at home wants to do something or whenever there's a decision made that involves spending or interaction at home, I get really nervous and worry about what could go wrong.

I am so sick of this feeling, I don't even know what it is.",3.440526315789473,5.535845684210528,5.003368421052631,79.49557894736844,74.6140350877193,8.068771929824562,28.94385964912281,8.841846274778883,2.5944133333333337,232,10,42,5,5,78,45,57,0.209,0.7659999999999999,0.026000000000000002,-0.8945,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,7,1,0,1,0,10,14,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,6,11,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,0,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158739146966815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071408189422564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17135692017441145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118008285900504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13554609638266352,0.0,0.14744508288355554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294209270486109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5204766597739456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258081251917304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24548732225904815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27522363162965763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16620317699914353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21982170412932966,0.1997287094296034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530237614308038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341032179765209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634727557467089,0.0,0.0,0.2836556659667384,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mdeelh,2020/01/25,"Feel like I’m wasting my life I’m 20 at the moment, and feel like I’ve wasted the last 3 years of my life and can’t see a light at the end of the tunnel.

Every since leaving college at 18 I’ve suffered with a health condition that has left me feeling super fucking fatigued with poor digestion etc. After 2 years I found it there was a reason and I’m trying now to seek treatment to resolve it (first attempt failed so let’s hope second try lucky)...

I have quit my job because I can’t stand to work with the symptoms, I have the shittest self perception of myself, meaning I hardly go out and become very reclusive. My family don’t understand and they get annoyed at me when I don’t come to family events etc.

I just feel like I can’t enjoy my life until I beat this, and I have no idea when and even if I will. It’s made me very suicidal at points but I’m too scared to go through with anything which is kind of stupid. 

Just could do with some advice.",2.9227166666666697,4.058990505000004,4.065000000000001,89.66666666666669,73.95,6.7333333333333325,24.833333333333336,7.0316486544052195,0.8744333333333341,751,23,162,7,15,245,120,200,0.141,0.782,0.077,-0.9257,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,8,9,16,3,1,9,0,15,8,0,2,0,34,34,13,1,3,4,0,5,3,0,1,7,0,0,1,6,14,1,0,11,0,1,3,6,7,0,2,3,7,21,9,23,28,3,24,0,3,1,1,2,8,1,4,15,98,27,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244029365883438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311003115302783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638083356861915,0.13838240511526298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793360679408907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004069715178653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097732539957994,0.0,0.2794820105631454,0.0827585110629978,0.0,0.10556943310359734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23624064475584744,0.0,0.2534188482725332,0.2685399291118913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065788832738358,0.0,0.13738339359485827,0.0,0.1158364911503822,0.06546332126892379,0.0,0.14242010781453718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122428903439325,0.0,0.0,0.13318650024121162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444973282468112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14144681242421747,0.0,0.0,0.12433947775295155,0.0,0.0,0.13047915916362196,0.0,0.10213504225011318,0.0,0.13267307358002167,0.136137242027238,0.1281262573960637,0.26550621577586875,0.18364362849184912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856051832819375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648685431439034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844763054579585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327043204445213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288277786329033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12544570782693845,0.0,0.0998467225034502,0.0,0.13071371504878238,0.0,0.0,0.1036482559941731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13705627776166415,0.0,0.0,0.1302331702054076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013898231616914,0.0,0.0,0.13044021023944394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20676885341755868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121883725710148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613763172395191
mentalhealth,throwawayhidingo,2020/01/25,"Worried of everything with bad social skills and shyness.  

Obvious throwaway.  
Not attention seeking but more seeking advice....

All I have been thinking about the past 2 weeks.  
I'm currently 16.  
I'm very introverted and shy with almost no social skills. I stay away from everyone. Getting bullied all the time.  
That's why from a young age I have thought about video games,the internet or PC's being an escape from that.  
However that lead to me being really overweight and again no social skills.  
On top of that I have realized I'm 16 and getting close to finishing school and thought to myself how will I ever get a wife or even girlfriend since I've never really been in a relationship or a life in general with actual friends ?  
On top of many medical problems effecting relationships.  
What if my parents pass away and i have no family of my own ?  
Sitting there depressed. Been thinking about this for weeks.  
I cant change it. I cant be normal and hanging out with people.  
Most people in this country like smoking,drugs,parties and ect ect.  
I cant do it. I dont wanna do this. I dont know anyone IRL so I have no incentive to go out.  
I mean what do I do ? Go out and walk around the street asking for friends ?  
Im hoping Uni might fix stuff. Maybe I find a girl or friends with common interests.  
But im losing hope every day more and more.  
I feel like I dont wanna talk about anything of this with my parents.  
I'm awaiting to finish high school and then try to tackle life myself.",1.9162043111527645,4.484575484536084,3.4202249297094696,86.24743205248362,82.81443298969073,6.413870665417058,24.28209934395501,7.686295010490155,1.5068226804123708,1170,45,222,21,33,384,157,291,0.127,0.741,0.132,0.539,4,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,8,11,12,0,0,9,0,23,4,0,3,5,58,42,21,0,7,8,3,1,2,4,2,4,0,0,1,13,22,1,0,11,1,0,6,12,4,0,0,5,1,23,8,39,32,7,39,0,2,0,0,15,16,0,10,17,145,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0960228432975642,0.0,0.0,0.09615397696893896,0.0,0.0,0.09853198821896576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880259177167118,0.0,0.0809736669562411,0.08759561924160211,0.091989411869243,0.0,0.18489745501238136,0.0,0.08215872419576704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409267580243313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06345895924203378,0.0,0.08475057340751192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3459672930264109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649913498975099,0.08900717070994521,0.08290506773490433,0.09402408286514537,0.0884343204623603,0.0,0.09276144656380472,0.0,0.049753290710386235,0.07029598233136393,0.0,0.0,0.08993454138017727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228067551998058,0.0,0.15422762795247955,0.0,0.11184438845655068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396352754400434,0.0,0.1954640320801222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125747551281711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05407729939166237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900368794147638,0.09614517518064647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008286844526326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099760740145795,0.0988546233510356,0.10718492625374312,0.0,0.09912624143346174,0.0,0.10438536900114948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589106945694729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640973988087144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185200100200441,0.0,0.09393260151576567,0.13643440489503286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415417496981808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607333067651766,0.0,0.0,0.21128655201111787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991692809204149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139634202041399,0.0,0.0,0.30091495533234736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487981947255004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126428598766544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908907059171627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609970451461658,0.0,0.15623500063008225,0.05737701727080534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06680619303614051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118915340404094,0.0,0.0,0.15785884957190954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878943515184101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999285587052267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jay_Walker528,2020/01/25,"I'm not okay today I'm at my breaking point pretending that I'm fine with everything going on in my life. Last summer, I got divorced from my husband and had to move back home with nothing but my 2 children to take care of. It took me a long time just to get an on call job that I do love doing, but I make little money, my paycheck varies, and I need a lot more money to pay for things for my growing children in the long run, let alone try to move out into my own place anytime soon. My ex-husband is getting married to the woman he fell in love with when we were still married and left me alone in the hospital for right after I gave birth to our second child. It hasn't even been a full year since we officially got divorced. At work, they had a full time position available for the exact job I'm on call for. I reached out to apply for the position, and although I know not to assume I'd get the position, I didn't even get a response from my boss acknowledging my interest. I understand that they probably want someone new or with different qualifications for the position, but I'm feeling really insecure about how well I'm doing. Even though everyone at work, from co-workers to guests we serve tell me how they all enjoy my work efforts and ethic when I'm there, I can't help feeling like I must be doing a terrible job to where my boss doesn't even give me the time of day to give me a call or anything to not just give me an interview, but to acknowledge that she received my interest but is looking elsewhere.

I'm sorry I'm babbling. I'm just at my wit's end. I don't have anyone to really talk with about my problems. And I'm really feeling in my emotions right now. I don't know how to deal with all the rejection. I feel pretty worthless and insignificant in all aspects of my life, like no one wants me or cares, besides my kids. And although I love my kids to death, I don't want to live just for them. I want to have my own life. And it sucks that in my own life, it's seemingly going nowhere.",6.892908653846158,5.151259781250005,7.527288461538465,78.14271153846154,65.37019230769229,10.82,34.98269230769231,9.642632912329526,3.0261975000000003,1583,59,334,26,20,529,191,416,0.11900000000000001,0.7440000000000001,0.13699999999999998,0.7824,5,2,0,0,2,0,36.0,4,0,4,4,23,19,1,1,18,1,22,7,0,6,5,65,68,25,1,7,15,1,4,2,1,1,4,0,1,6,10,21,0,0,11,1,3,9,11,6,1,2,9,5,54,13,59,56,10,56,0,2,1,3,36,26,1,6,22,219,64,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750094043602299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05907638885780608,0.0,0.06952691334978167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496651303936865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588169002968,0.0,0.17228350337519674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448815307910596,0.08710402975872399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827259746548864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503829555211553,0.07483181607612716,0.0,0.0,0.2232156760420116,0.0,0.0,0.08073247152917525,0.07593289975685663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170879885380856,0.06035866789917951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765672113394461,0.2431474719873384,0.09603362916835972,0.0,0.1351464924032706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05663092311213959,0.0,0.08474894780823547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25152567598946096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286544256483173,0.06886948004080187,0.0,0.0,0.09179710377604797,0.08639531087510835,0.2387071681471435,0.08255371795619489,0.08467976638601625,0.07460497574223802,0.1495394926499478,0.07094913933376525,0.0,0.0,0.0718291806401785,0.2287627621882143,0.0,0.05639679205882962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17959600735960055,0.0,0.06264722134354841,0.0,0.08159960984227428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106908389301397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057251657367952284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827259746548864,0.0,0.07986902974767138,0.0,0.0,0.08595527353246729,0.09109299344866596,0.08084417330617341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16237666886942825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14430559399476592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691524212485043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988983741715461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158691088459262,0.0,0.0,0.0945780629599893,0.0,0.0,0.0674726997075472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352490738858255,0.0679087308830491,0.0738467544856972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056130467144703496,0.0,0.08300961389577703,0.0,0.14779793448944462,0.0,0.08008530740877527,0.0,0.09386993583888502,0.057362208839605036,0.0,0.0,0.08795560522317628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19933424529048607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596539200359027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460348085601793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05440788398544407
mentalhealth,SN2014dt,2020/01/25,"Getting my post removed got me weirdly emotional and upset. Idk why. I don’t know why I got so upset over this.

I went to several subs for women including r/askwomen r/askwomenadvice to ask a question about facial hair and what I should do with mine.

Reddit is like 70% men so it’s really nice to have a place to ask sensitive questions like this that are directed to women. 

My post was genuine and honest and asking for advice and I got so many helpful nice people responding.

 I tried to post several times, it got removed, and I was recommended to post in another sub where it was then removed.  it was so fucking frustrating. I don’t know why I’m so frustrated and I don’t why this struck a nerve.  I’ve never gotten mad at Reddit or anything online like this before. 

Maybe because it was such an intimate question and it seemed like the mods were really callus about it. Maybe because I felt like I connected with people and that was taken away. Maybe because I tried so many times to write something meaningful and no one recognized it.",3.90758560140474,5.947517985074626,5.106748609891722,79.50874451273049,73.12935323383084,8.311501316944689,28.2414398595259,9.007467420416297,2.556371729587357,829,33,148,18,17,274,107,201,0.099,0.741,0.16,0.8964,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,10,15,4,2,5,0,15,3,2,0,1,24,32,18,0,1,1,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,3,15,12,0,0,8,0,0,4,5,7,0,1,15,2,16,8,18,16,0,18,0,0,0,1,12,6,1,5,9,92,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952665224631335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222721896958507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022631933883449,0.0,0.2734211828297833,0.0,0.09159547065330093,0.0,0.0,0.17828778859007652,0.0,0.08295717766628344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966361486557344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360610387502108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012833403501253,0.050934727284748516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118880196082285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534578198791505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715638436682848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23814450477767984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19767999393531635,0.2938267295724509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519063174586102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606204022853115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351751816035189,0.0,0.10185675232707453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734755424946528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276347888685825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249097350677066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875162839012186,0.0,0.2202728786677484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505289799723648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369491053838607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237920864385733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037460777136236,0.3518798071603106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lifebeforeknife,2020/01/25,"I'm tired and I'm done with school.. Everything is too much. School, home friends and family drives me crazy. I can't handle it all.. I sometimes I would like to disappear for a while and then come back. At school I'm behind, like a lot. It's awful going to school knowing that it only makes me feel stupid. Why would I even go? Well because I have to. I don't have a choice. I wish tho. I sit in class all fuckin' day and feel like a lost cause. I loose my appetite and teachers worries about me for that and other reasons. I can't help it. I need support and help. I just don't know how to ask for it..maybe I should be able to do well. But my thoughts just wanders away.. 

I also have a really hard time making friends at school. I kinda don't even have close friends anymore.. I may seem like a happy kid (that gets in trouble often) but I don't know what I am.. Am I just another bad kid that doesn't try hard enough? Is there something wrong with me? Why can't I do what everyone else is doing? What if I really disappeared?...

Does anyone else feel like this or is it just me?..",-0.0254592918910106,2.1531163480176225,1.6201664219285377,98.42130527002772,88.16299559471365,4.772654592918911,17.658508728993308,6.238725200709706,-0.3821008647413929,829,21,194,8,27,268,118,227,0.159,0.732,0.109,-0.8684,0,0,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,0,1,16,18,2,0,6,1,27,2,0,5,2,43,49,16,0,6,8,0,5,5,3,4,1,0,1,2,14,11,0,0,9,0,0,6,8,6,2,0,3,5,28,12,17,41,5,18,0,1,0,1,8,6,1,7,10,125,42,6,0.09940220014370107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949190354189199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042318738881626,0.0,0.0,0.09858027237458908,0.0695043295567484,0.10184930085576936,0.0,0.0,0.09292763882368543,0.0,0.09339163915534332,0.07643415617886773,0.0829966850873166,0.06059465858973492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211344114379664,0.0,0.08562619375148513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410619575384419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698753520535879,0.10172296245375567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607556641666085,0.0,0.0,0.10270904463144898,0.0,0.13130843142087512,0.0,0.0,0.09498306202501,0.08933628799829285,0.0,0.0937075477262183,0.0,0.15078221728376326,0.14202590328831755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23039367975961425,0.0,0.05193354690057074,0.0,0.11298512213253313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581549042937084,0.17808969349373396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13325439889574198,0.0,0.0997085115041343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388654882059064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428144699557095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850924368951237,0.08450819590585895,0.0,0.0,0.1327034809333089,0.0,0.09986287060813327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307205446935756,0.07370547188584972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559985244397276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735918950171787,0.10220201716078037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5030016668780818,0.0,0.09049202972527856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652467002273215,0.09831131764979667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128004387537066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891424358059669,0.0579622222751106,0.11424820641082785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748756896578864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874903130702965,0.0,0.1793900492130023,0.0,0.11430762451709107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094775934354684,0.0,0.14122494198727092,0.10868070143833647,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i-want-to-dead-011,2020/01/25,"too scared to tell my parents about my mental health in the past they said i was pretending to be suicidal for attention.

eventually i told my doctor who told me to see a psychiatrist, but my parents said it wasn't a big deal so they never took me.

now for the past month my mental state has been at its worst. i want help and this is probably the last time i'm going to try and ask for it.

i guess i'm so scared because if this doesn't go well i'm going to end up killing myself because there's no other way out of this. and as much as i want to do that i'm terrified to do it if that makes sense.

does anyone have any advice on how to approach my parents? please don't suggest school counselor because that did not work out for me in the past my school's counseling services are bad.",4.461566265060244,4.377719012048196,5.38520481927711,86.01973493975906,69.72289156626506,8.567710843373495,28.045783132530122,8.238735603445708,1.5991344578313258,620,19,138,8,10,204,99,166,0.195,0.747,0.057999999999999996,-0.9834,3,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,2,1,8,6,1,2,6,0,13,2,0,2,1,16,31,11,2,4,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,12,5,0,0,1,1,0,5,6,5,1,0,9,3,18,1,23,21,2,24,0,0,1,0,15,8,0,3,9,90,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173125986093437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08163890168636254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0839425584487258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122316236010928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023769934079046,0.21954620824864346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12376746870463293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228774434784934,0.10505757418067854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632968968218484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046835127882849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322498812015051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276087632272121,0.0,0.0,0.08046775818996148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281881522813127,0.0,0.0,0.09785771380801793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013507774000306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419666545005427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582368604601783,0.0,0.08825141170888348,0.0,0.0925908511523413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39990779942267335,0.0,0.3438072326902335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317801167894232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943544916462266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283922784459769,0.0,0.24038429719177354,0.24299635485151036,0.0956652269402707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13131647776626126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493000036926343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07000279352632215,0.0,0.0,0.2294280453180549,0.13338124973582507,0.08150685343778108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161856250560498,0.09529101840043218,0.0,0.0,0.10794040532318612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739867016793358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PrincessMiaMoo,2020/01/25,"Rant. The mental health system is broken and we have a long way to go. My name is Mia. 

I'm 22 years old and I want to bring awareness to mental health issues in Canada. 
Canada is improving its mental health but lots more needs to be done.

My story is that I was sexually assaulted at work. (I have filed a police report). 
I now have PTSD and am unable to work due to daily panic attacks and nightmares every night. 

The workers compensation insurance board will pay for my counselling but not for my time off work because I was able to work for a few months before I broke down and my PTSD took over. 

I have doctor notes and psychiatric notes explaining that PTSD is an illness that can take months or years to show symptoms.

I have to wait 8 months to see a professional mental health counsellor which is covered by the insurance board. 

My city offers walk in counselling but you can only go 3 times per year.

I'm maxed out on walk in counselling,  and I still have months before counselling thought the workers compensation Insurance board starts. 

I have no money coming in and I'm unable to work. 

My car was reposed because I couldn't make the payments. 

The whole thing has been a living nightmare.

I have a few ideas for how to improve the mental health system:

- Offer a psychiatric assessment after a traumatic event covered by the workers compensation insurance. 

-Offer more education regards to mental illness and how it affects people. 

-Free counselling. Not 3 times max per year. 



Thank you for reading.",4.723619047619049,7.0305006000000025,4.932142857142857,80.48119047619048,71.57142857142857,7.238095238095237,27.380952380952376,8.07648339933343,1.9636309523809523,1208,44,205,18,24,379,145,280,0.133,0.8170000000000001,0.05,-0.9747,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,2,0,8,4,6,2,1,17,0,26,9,0,4,0,31,44,15,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,1,9,0,0,0,7,12,0,1,3,2,3,8,4,4,0,0,7,1,22,3,31,34,6,41,0,1,1,0,8,10,0,2,20,129,29,13,0.08403040612965576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955967179957872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244831126921324,0.0,0.14300737296896182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238475432004644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600868134688658,0.0,0.0859922802044988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079924136593349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551283256990507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4466019613844162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486010030419352,0.0,0.08770591221445531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742003881208931,0.07436426514207396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07143964633567351,0.0,0.0,0.05609094859834247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5080973112974602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682890739034148,0.0,0.0,0.062307481399729824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885684377685892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817577579728941,0.0,0.0,0.06390891041672417,0.0,0.09859157623071928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05825610319545128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946811439975087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405314595094783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696135423197865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059477153960697124,0.0,0.06710679088164376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733976663657161,0.06318040769642659,0.0,0.0,0.07736390812307338,0.0,0.0,0.05582606798149597,0.0,0.0,0.06671075617949816,0.1469964167064836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336087308966473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495633106880214,0.06669942509226727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381694754495476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3058756822984809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21645130600965293
mentalhealth,ghostyy9,2020/01/25,"Feeling Detached?? Hey guys, this is something I’ve been struggling with for some time now. It’s hard for me to become close to people, even my own family. It just feels like it’s really only me doing this life thing solo. I meet people but they all just seem like the same personality with a different face. It’s hard for me to get interested in people for long, and even if I do find myself becoming interested in them, I find I suddenly become emotionally attached very quickly and imagining the best things between us happening. But nevertheless when our relationship ends I find it’s very easy for me to move on, almost like I never really cared about them in the first place. If anyone else is having/had a similar experience feel free to share, or if there is communities where there are others who feel the way I do feel free to let me know. Thanx!",4.990040650406503,6.485848573170736,6.144878048780488,75.34869918699188,69.36585365853661,9.613008130081301,26.47154471544715,9.928628108626363,2.5643349593495937,682,21,126,17,12,228,104,164,0.051,0.7340000000000001,0.215,0.987,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,2,0,3,2,11,11,0,1,6,0,9,2,1,0,2,29,19,9,0,3,8,0,7,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,11,5,0,0,11,0,2,1,1,1,0,1,1,7,19,12,19,17,5,18,0,0,0,0,12,7,0,7,12,89,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058979225690453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420504242789066,0.12339122979107085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39900498254333294,0.0,0.0,0.12638023241279675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278289170866595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12582011119014805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060092806832284,0.13546365754518966,0.1066621770469605,0.0,0.0,0.15908119838645385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780027200022833,0.11352743177901313,0.0,0.3044564054431617,0.08603274996335179,0.0,0.0,0.33020304952096896,0.10243476022052556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06291790091468932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924121596847392,0.10649279869373557,0.0,0.21575706567122616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06618328136201942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123144304492268,0.08506083229821468,0.17650298513878218,0.0,0.0,0.10657370538966393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799436214690582,0.0,0.0,0.0928803778893608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09158981639250867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504658158286239,0.10515181665706982,0.12582011119014805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429666071115514,0.0,0.0,0.12929304418924775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963180640684538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271024016976287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589597539077105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16001209480807818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022168859143585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448583095307179,0.0,0.0,0.1987290283993828,0.0,0.09558898841886683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Squigled,2020/01/25,"I don't want to be dramatic, but I'm kinda terrified of going insane I want to make this quick,

I'm quite young really, I won't disclose how young but I've always considered myself to be relatively intelligent, I always thought that my distrust of the real was just pondering

recently I've started some therapy, and, I'm slowly realising that I might be much worse than I thought, I've always acknowledged I probably have depression and anxiety, but I keep having this suspicion that I can't trust my memories,

some of my memories are as clear as whats in front of me, others feel so distant I could only explain an abstract location, 

some just weren't there, but I know they where there before,

about a month ago now, right after Christmas I had the worst dissociation I've ever experienced, as well as derealisation, it went on for weeks, it felt like a month, I only started to feel like I was awake when 2020 began, I haven't talked about this yet to anyone.

I don't really know whats happening, but I know these where too severe to be normal, I'm not trying to self diagnose, but if someone could maybe give a little solace or information it would help.

I think it's about time my life got better, I hope the best for us all",8.643553719008269,6.665286495867772,9.324710743801656,67.39342975206614,62.14049586776859,12.93223140495868,36.049586776859506,11.741389052700956,4.1383173553719,980,34,184,25,11,335,142,242,0.165,0.705,0.13,-0.8405,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,1,3,18,10,1,0,7,0,20,2,0,2,3,45,47,17,0,8,11,0,3,2,0,3,2,0,0,1,14,2,0,1,13,0,0,3,7,3,1,0,10,4,27,7,24,28,7,26,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,8,19,125,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284723905637653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177811647090097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738714608664,0.0,0.0,0.08901385692725665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832625479671927,0.0,0.13359760415844182,0.1125899670633241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032836337042324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964667495135542,0.1292107934119126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515367888128222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873736837274255,0.09094594189955184,0.12223172176474538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212151477188796,0.07234974828584209,0.0,0.10181656979712064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257443109567923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532913038567318,0.0,0.0,0.12644151141678786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315356839975507,0.0,0.0,0.2098887062439336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991851958023321,0.12438852443491633,0.12759196618908394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497635140773457,0.0,0.12789389284590896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504933553088916,0.0,0.0,0.2032255398827927,0.0,0.09358302487624763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247308069531677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936407269039292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13725515121501294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540338313628691,0.0,0.1448997249858959,0.1631082947634384,0.0,0.12569725743298668,0.0,0.0,0.10871684733955753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280574669416706,0.14381718767818802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786419357288464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18021273171498772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232206422577528,0.0,0.0,0.14558312078763125,0.0,0.0,0.08157120805480365,0.0,0.2021301761315641,0.07423193625038854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643100144407917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15313093453202348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15017429411348884,0.0,0.10211552129552856,0.0,0.1144615076508194,0.11801200407247132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973356467362318,0.09043304827759824,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dominik_normal,2020/01/25,"I keep thinking Im in experiment. I keep thinking Im in experiment in which my human rights are being abused. How can I escape such thoughts ? Anyone relates ? I took lot of ""medicine"" before and these thoughts keep returning anyways",3.6285714285714255,6.716240904761904,4.262190476190476,79.46614285714288,80.42857142857143,6.217142857142857,32.20952380952381,7.554174236665415,2.6640038095238103,186,10,30,3,5,59,29,42,0.09300000000000001,0.8640000000000001,0.043,-0.4515,0,0,0,0,1,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,10,11,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,5,0,4,7,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,1,19,7,0,0.0,0.2366287550899186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13964486274127458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699421360286226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3907177608382276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4314513703298605,0.0,0.0,0.5325456644615097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16978993241206805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17055489727631226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25593768309044035,0.0,0.3171016477224322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218899049043899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pathetic_dildo,2020/01/25,"Why can't my mum just side with me for once :( Basically, a few years ago my family moved houses to live with my stepdad. He's not very nice to me or my siblings so that was a awful place to live. A few months later i was having an argument with my mum and him, and he pushed me and i ended up smacking my head and arm against a door frame as i fell to floor. It ended up bruising and when i told my social worker about what happened, my parents twisted the story and said i was lying and the bruise was made by me punching my arm. So after that i was kicked out of home and when i begged them to let me move back in because i was 16 and had nowhere to go, they demanded that i tell social services that i was lying and they were false allegations :( i didn't, because i couldn't. It happened and i wouldn't let them make me out to be the liar that they ALWAYS tell everyone i am. So nowadays, if it gets brought up my mum always tells me i was lying even though she was. right. there. And when i call her out and ask when she never admits it happened, she just gives me more bs and i hate it, i just want her to support me and not my abusive stepdad. Sorry for this i just needed to get it off my chest for once",2.8241085271317843,3.46651962790698,4.132558139534884,90.96341085271321,73.65116279069767,6.663565891472868,24.02325581395349,6.42735559955562,0.5033162790697681,936,25,215,6,18,309,133,258,0.141,0.831,0.027999999999999997,-0.9804,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,5,1,17,4,2,0,8,1,20,4,4,2,1,37,38,26,0,5,8,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,13,21,0,0,1,0,0,6,7,2,0,0,16,1,51,2,29,17,3,31,0,0,0,0,28,12,0,2,13,159,64,2,0.0,0.1424162709608036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654924418735548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20003054985277907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236992694630177,0.0,0.0,0.09242568362591867,0.0,0.14654450377209255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273671375578285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129214401152744,0.0,0.0,0.07939036777956111,0.0,0.0,0.11485538507157275,0.0,0.0,0.11331300811689587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12559813087152386,0.11530592335944595,0.06831191495213014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31887498484762555,0.0,0.0,0.11867172015648275,0.12335894759944277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205694914394868,0.0,0.0,0.1386936159173997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458234341395785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21227600381423944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373528877344866,0.08023382842153483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594176984366053,0.25550522846497403,0.0,0.08912610495861048,0.09270495111845807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25601622388245365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346686897596946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255824698678119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026493692829733,0.11433686344631992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450556780441185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345530445784433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364005071334503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151779177109243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809499929896973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485538507157275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991768405891347,0.0708965397291114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846098631218347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740427547569066
mentalhealth,NikoFromFin,2020/01/25,"I feel like myself only when tired I've been tired for so long that whenever I get a good night sleep, I don't feel like myself. I feel like an empty shell when my mind is fully awake.

It started when I went to university. I'm a night owl and my typical sleep schedule is going to bed at 3 am and waking up at 10 am which sucks when you have to wake up at 6 am everyday. Going to sleep at 10 pm everyday meant that I just rolled around in my bed for 5 hours before I finally fell asleep, doesn't matter how much melatonin I overdosed on, can't fall asleep.

Sleeping for 1-3 hours a night was first tough and I spend all my days (except the weekend) dead tired, and then I got used to it. Being tired no longer felt awful, it became the new norm.

Now I'm honestly scared. It feels like the only way for me to feel true happiness and sadnesss is when my brain is tired so it's forced to release those chemicals to keep me awake",3.5332307692307694,4.027388989743591,4.601538461538464,88.78846153846158,71.92307692307692,7.846153846153848,23.717948717948712,7.882392219407189,0.9234102564102562,723,17,163,9,13,237,114,195,0.17800000000000002,0.715,0.107,-0.9145,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,1,11,11,1,1,7,1,14,14,9,2,2,22,32,14,1,0,2,0,6,4,0,0,5,0,2,0,9,6,0,1,7,1,1,5,4,3,0,1,6,6,20,8,22,25,2,37,0,0,0,0,1,9,1,0,26,92,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928334392912254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534320881313079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196180035893104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468163742028528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535594933034796,0.28660156394423336,0.09629842159440276,0.10986769195014172,0.0,0.08531042682571773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05239972222763916,0.0,0.11399931968705106,0.08412224485009971,0.08021465150012308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676533063485996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19753970468630264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914633515220206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19599525220782926,0.0,0.0,0.08875745182218649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10126882619116047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372797710366237,0.0,0.0,0.09686502623409028,0.0,0.2823587041034683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15255693111425614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041226319358146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4014676147103899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098894364250978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5763687094581605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662222214372307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960908371627247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297398054527757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dirty_ni88er,2020/01/25,"Depressed Boyfriend -- How do I support ?? Hi all, 

I am female (18), my boyfriend is soon to be 19. We have been dating for about 4 months, long distance. During this time, we have been chatting every day, still learning new things about each other. I opened up to him about my past experience of sexual assault which caused me anxiety and depression, as well as me currently attending therapy for these things. He has been nothing but supportive for me. 

Recently, within the last 5 days, he opened up to me about his own current struggle with mental health. We were on Facetime and he told me how he feels lonely and lost, how his home with his family doesn't even feel like a home. As a way to cope, he's been doing drugs (MDMA, nangs, cocaine, etc.) to numb with his pain. And he's doing it often. Including on nights which he has work the next day and still goes to work even though he's still high and only had 3 hours sleep. He also told me during Facetime that he felt better telling me as he hadn't told anyone, but he was scared to tell me because he was worried I would call him a druggo and leave him. 

I know this isn't him and that he's going through a rough patch as he hardly touched drugs when we first met. Only the occasional joint and LSD trip here and there. Nothing as heavy as what he's doing now. He's only started doing heavy drugs often within the last 2/3 weeks. 

So back to my main question:

How do I help him? How do I support him? I want to be there for him but it's hard when he's a $500 4 hour plane trip away. I told him I'm always a call away and if he ever feels like he's going to harm himself, especially in a way which is irreversible, that I'm only a call away and it doesn't matter when he calls me during the day or night. I told him I'd rather lose sleep staying up all night talking to him than waking up the next day to the news that he's done something terrible. 

I'm just wondering if there's anything else I can do to help him? Obviously if he keeps doing drugs, (he told me during the Facetime he's going to stop), I won't be able to stay with him because it's too emotionally draining, especially when I have my own stuff to deal with. 

He told me he's told his best friend (2 days after our Facetime, after I encouraged him too because he needs a support person who lives in his city) and that his best friend took it well and will try to be there for him. I'm just wondering what else I can do because I feel like I'm not doing enough ??? I just really want to help him :((

Any ideas or suggestions will be appreciated !",4.2244739495798305,4.671300055238098,5.064058823529411,86.25820588235297,70.35238095238095,8.005042016806724,26.10784313725491,7.928766900206844,1.2902885154061623,1999,56,431,24,34,651,227,525,0.11199999999999999,0.7829999999999999,0.105,0.7281,2,2,7,0,0,0,66.0,5,0,0,8,40,27,1,2,17,0,43,10,3,6,4,70,79,41,0,8,13,0,9,3,2,4,7,0,2,1,23,26,0,2,11,1,0,7,6,12,2,1,22,9,60,15,57,48,10,68,0,5,0,0,85,16,0,10,44,270,83,3,0.057855024719485164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046266642365727584,0.048140015236010615,0.0,0.0,0.03934340074258295,0.0,0.044258935554239785,0.0,0.0,0.04045357848019158,0.0,0.04760975577655382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16307010058473084,0.04448694283173369,0.0,0.14107154431229268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143055814345237,0.05116806782567013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23630579527256826,0.0,0.0,0.05943304728693585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22387022830374445,0.059645990080178735,0.0996608960301888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05920577712357838,0.0,0.0,0.2683738436796222,0.0,0.09666089871701168,0.06507911573598384,0.0,0.05977970615818137,0.06452364584733643,0.07642539636697318,0.05233318212144903,0.048745353592921634,0.0,0.0,0.056593315684509725,0.05454056834018922,0.0,0.11701295538864318,0.12399492365874225,0.05554989661014188,0.0,0.0,0.049211454471140996,0.0,0.0,0.08939729716536053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864103145295386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036534765273847,0.0,0.0,0.06149718585388875,0.0,0.0,0.11633701061367033,0.06112701007741101,0.11606661400804635,0.0,0.11395109068288076,0.0,0.0,0.06531128077048652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051424204248491166,0.0,0.0,0.03179560854621995,0.09431913390733376,0.0,0.06126011757183046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479512812328709,0.0,0.05108704678049435,0.05119987628528986,0.0,0.06472497391891341,0.06315559380852588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583042572702029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046179328761960826,0.0,0.0,0.04289876775114188,0.0,0.055876743391556793,0.12305895028023532,0.16287906447713754,0.0,0.1110269131539828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600541338571712,0.06156182538406866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055229167527249566,0.0,0.050516776012721816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481086843024465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03706341029787761,0.0,0.0571248572283035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0579229726348704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157936138528499,0.0,0.0,0.04453962456983066,0.0,0.0,0.040950084274629615,0.12333151698997614,0.13860929242608885,0.04836939124200905,0.0,0.06048263350941468,0.06623016161041892,0.0,0.26261278575444136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046501677360136086,0.10113568333653672,0.0,0.0661622628821321,0.0,0.0768726153263527,0.0,0.056842268040889266,0.0,0.033735730171716084,0.0,0.0,0.44226364353667225,0.06427906122577964,0.039279764080967186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06824878510311083,0.09184525138518168,0.04640781106867662,0.0,0.10403723066392864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254826127563164,0.084238294091608,0.0587545859523677,0.0,0.041098549618970234,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ironsherpa,2020/01/25,Just called my cities 24/7 crisis line. It helped. She was a trained therapist and helped me get out of the head space I was in just enough to keep me from self harming. I was super nervous to call and thought my crisis wasn't legitimate. I strongly encouraged anyone to take advantage of this resource if it's available. No crisis is to small.,3.695,6.008822439393942,3.8969696969696974,86.71545454545458,74.60606060606061,6.824242424242425,27.66666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.7222303030303037,275,11,52,4,6,85,49,66,0.301,0.625,0.07400000000000001,-0.9533,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,2,6,0,1,2,0,5,1,1,0,0,8,9,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,0,8,4,9,4,1,4,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,0,34,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19192789749735625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5605644315905516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836187488720572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434082816102656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817031523276881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3679660932698056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24397691805485944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28635011017900297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20638028406155529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187009034192517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21791225020956412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gaiame,2020/01/25,Mindfulness can help recurrent episodes of depression. When I was in inpatient care for a month one of the therapists focused solely on mindfulness. He’d been using it for years with his patients and was happy that Science was finally catching on and proving that it does have positive impact and changes our brains. [Article](https://greatergood.berkeley.edu/article/item/can_mindfulness_help_when_youre_depressed?utm_campaign=oura-insider-4-2020&utm_medium=email&utm_source=Klaviyo&_ke=eyJrbF9lbWFpbCI6ICJyZWJlY2NhZ2FsbGFnaGVyQGhvdG1haWwuY29tIiwgImtsX2NvbXBhbnlfaWQiOiAiTXh4NXJHIn0%3D),23.714565217391304,28.07414042028985,14.395471014492754,22.578423913043512,28.85507246376812,16.17536231884058,50.58333333333334,14.554592549557764,8.734272463768118,535,23,44,16,4,136,56,69,0.055999999999999994,0.7070000000000001,0.23800000000000002,0.9022,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,7,1,1,1,1,8,9,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,4,0,4,2,8,4,0,8,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,29,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.638165498548527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21916752040724405,0.0,0.0,0.2001699763610412,0.0,0.2076895062464964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909743754230752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718083813701189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21506826024934236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20899532434890225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13159484592060966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3964716083470582,0.0,0.1567075246585371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330372633184254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22795250457744806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695647763660748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642910827628942
mentalhealth,frontierfawn,2020/01/25,"I know running won't solve my problems, but I can't stand to stay in one place any longer. Not too long ago I saw a post on here from someone that was planning to kill themselves, and instead decided to pack up and leave town instead, citing if they were going to give it all up they had nothing to really lose anyways. 

I feel similar. I haven't ever planned on taking my own life, but I do have horrible anxiety, issues with control and letting go, and suicidal ideations. I've found a job that lets me work remotely so I've decided to leave. I'm not sure where yet, but I need a death in a different way so I can start over from the traumatic few years I've had. 

I'm so tired of feeling this way and while I know running won't solve all of my problems, staying on the hamster wheel in the same city, same friends, same relationships won't do anything for me either.",4.146355932203388,4.9154147796610195,5.029166666666669,85.27730932203391,70.6949152542373,8.385875706214689,31.69915254237288,8.59863814320734,2.3501830508474577,684,30,143,11,12,223,110,177,0.223,0.705,0.07200000000000001,-0.9853,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,5,11,6,1,0,7,0,15,2,0,1,4,31,29,13,3,4,7,0,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,7,0,0,4,7,4,0,1,6,3,16,2,21,18,8,29,0,1,1,0,5,12,0,1,7,95,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691603579954272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736393805286292,0.0,0.10952851503059338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782086003366656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605829837129878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495874453460429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951002216407384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478720604738338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15698404322724907,0.1106166820739618,0.0,0.0,0.13734654627163892,0.16273935136235812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14943754551492267,0.1420791366384871,0.0,0.15840197051899613,0.0,0.15737051716002715,0.0,0.0,0.3032033926807529,0.0,0.2928123611347753,0.1011287661578098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670540646883424,0.0,0.16017624893044582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616247927306448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738031398522266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701911367054987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495874453460429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13712211273339542,0.0,0.0,0.2739983574338857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917215979340754,0.0,0.0,0.15371641304666891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12131174823112775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134003144926912,0.3052110888619972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15661025739509893,0.0,0.13494078241668744,0.0,0.10764981302172703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16455864856083846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272913677397926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423313558069043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220003269132764
mentalhealth,solum_humana,2020/01/25,"Pain is the loudest voice I think my biggest fear is that one day, I'll just stop. That my fears and anxiety will take over, and I won't be able to recover. Mental illness is a terrifying thing. The thought of not being able to escape something you're afraid of only adds to it. I grew up in a state of constant fear that I'm still deal with today. It shows through the way I talk. The way I act. I don't like it or want it, but I've accepted my demons and learned to respect the power they have over me. I've acknowledged them, and have learned to live along side them. But I can never escape them. I often find myself screaming at myself to shut up. Litterly yelling it out loud. Physical pain is the only thing that really shuts it up. Because the physical pain is the loudest voice in my head.",2.034253578732105,3.9858084171779176,3.343705521472393,90.44459713701436,78.32515337423312,6.555255623721883,24.36359918200409,7.554174236665415,1.0927042126789366,624,22,133,9,15,203,96,163,0.172,0.7609999999999999,0.067,-0.9423,1,0,1,0,1,0,18.0,0,0,4,1,3,11,0,4,10,0,13,5,1,0,1,24,18,7,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,2,4,5,0,0,12,8,0,1,7,1,0,2,4,8,0,1,1,5,19,3,21,13,0,24,1,0,0,0,6,13,0,2,7,88,31,2,0.2929660200770712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205910173784986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929468331334754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829609480896545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446942323778876,0.15101755130234373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4945023329828528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13388281741174213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15033382864895675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156419956219205,0.0,0.1293471815571784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762042094719016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297672773284215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926067861220844,0.22281385982308186,0.4676047515033548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938407671425273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127697776400357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698152103659246,0.12246635546721647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013699351344956,0.11773749479117278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19463360593373213,0.09386039810798537,0.0,0.1162911476595973,0.0,0.0,0.13884876570773552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639947456465114,0.2325427902914067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nicox_Crrano,2020/01/25,"I am not a good person I often tell myself that is bc i have mental health issues, but that doesn't take away the fact that i am",2.061379310344829,2.4340422068965535,3.899482758620693,92.9312931034483,75.20689655172413,5.8000000000000025,14.5,3.1291,-1.1568068965517244,100,0,24,0,2,34,23,29,0.07200000000000001,0.9279999999999999,0.0,-0.1786,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,1,4,6,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,1,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,19,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3573437620984851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190127645877591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4042856846110766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3969781576209769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3832952067469894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3320999016633247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2859697962406671,0.0,0.3324356099274687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Slimmathers,2020/01/25,"Perspective shifts  I have these periods where the way I veiw everything is different. Usually after smoking some weed but occasionally just randomly. The way I view everything changes even something like numbers or the road seem completely different. It's like I'm viewing everything in a different way than typical and it just seems wrong or off. Frequently these shifts lead to something being seen in a negative light that causes me to panic. 

  I'm just wondering what this could be. I know I need to stop smoking and I'm working on cutting back but this doesn't happen to everyone who smokes so I'm not sure if something else is causing this.",4.4820903954802285,7.400503338983055,5.145000000000003,75.68975988700569,74.9322033898305,9.696045197740114,33.56214689265537,9.928628108626363,4.251251977401132,526,28,86,17,12,169,79,118,0.16899999999999998,0.779,0.052000000000000005,-0.9386,3,0,4,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,7,6,1,1,5,0,7,0,0,3,1,24,18,8,0,3,9,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,4,6,3,10,14,1,16,0,0,3,0,1,6,0,8,8,55,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078894254015712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28827322865971045,0.1484289576337431,0.0,0.14711195127458154,0.0,0.0,0.11202580244579304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4397810213463925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721067078966373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267317076954022,0.0,0.0,0.13407184035340167,0.37830367710567736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407532026627224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07711048946024572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13709637132071312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403779420429504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646230900004428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554651893489859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3240515663629473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11730511237561643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322401421572286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15453120704651674,0.0,0.0,0.3341137005735647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215978134723224,0.10214706347352268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15340652682790604,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slow-wheels,2020/01/25,"I finally figure out love. So love is a really complicated and multi-faceted thing, so breaking it down into something that is so true it can apply to any form of love is actually a really hard thing. Luckily, even though my real parents never taught me love, it is something you can get a grasp on with lectures from really smart and compassionate people and a lot of thinking and writing.

Basically, the best definition of love that I have heard is, “the feeling that comes from the mutual understanding that life is suffering, but that it is worth it in spite of this.”

The thing that is called “love” the most, that is, what is actually little more than hormonal emotions bringing people together for reproduction, is not really love at all. It’s all instinct. Love can be involved in such relationships, but sexual relationships can exist without any love at all. In fact, I think many do.

But you don’t need to like, have a complete philosophical understanding of love to experience it, either. I think that most people who have experienced love really haven’t thought about it enough to explain it to another person. Love is a pretty universal thing. Like, you don’t have to understand nuclear fusion to feel the warmth of the sun.

I’m really glad that I was able to find a good explanation of it, because it is something that I haven’t really ever experienced before. And so, I had no understanding of how to use it. But now I understand that I have to at the least act like I am worthy of existing in spite of the suffering of life, and that this is the first step in finding love, not what you should be seeking to find in the end. Because if you put all your eggs in one basket, very little can save you from tragedy. 

My favorite part of this definition of love is that it really applies to every possible type of love. Romantic love, parental love, platonic love, the Buddhist love of all of nature, it’s just great.

I know it isn’t perfect. There are an infinite number of explanations for any given phenomena, and so there will always be a better definition somewhere. However, I have something I can work with here.

I hope some day I can find someone to share love with. I don’t know who they will be or what kind of a relationship wit will be. But I do have hope. That is more than I had before.",6.349124809741245,6.928399011415527,7.224337899543383,72.16122526636228,65.7351598173516,10.963774733637747,32.203957382039576,10.825029732296443,3.5738852359208524,1829,70,335,49,27,612,194,438,0.047,0.625,0.32899999999999996,0.9995,3,0,4,0,0,0,51.0,0,7,1,5,16,41,2,0,22,0,52,23,0,2,10,68,97,21,0,5,12,2,3,3,0,4,2,1,0,1,41,13,1,0,20,0,1,5,11,4,0,3,7,6,29,37,57,81,17,30,0,2,0,20,43,16,0,8,11,254,70,4,0.044981328981279385,0.0,0.08779057690203121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03742806909155988,0.0,0.0,0.09176653854829693,0.047166845431195085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054840401290773486,0.0,0.07655159586328833,0.0,0.047205129638389104,0.03978233011501455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0459309661039621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038747431998308636,0.04716206763127447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029009235980424007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05059794078257712,0.039840106311631984,0.04647773710482478,0.0,0.029709743563117837,0.040688187293251514,0.037898709695538935,0.0,0.0,0.044000370984008524,0.0,0.0,0.045487822941294616,0.0,0.0,0.049274847229001016,0.16444847913362387,0.03826109545275369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02350088785682985,0.0,0.0,0.03772820462479856,0.0,0.04959207399990165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04029443553380183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935321820628883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046841132220606985,0.04944112408946268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354328583082942,0.06592681573669293,0.09016621731673596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0382415173523373,0.8119481118788073,0.0,0.0,0.04560400748826363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033353085483268693,0.034692373921334035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030480512643658857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998928853046364,0.048710395888215664,0.0,0.09355316951433224,0.039275961455713375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050709689857520265,0.0,0.04576218265363437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045218659552615593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051198600046855225,0.2305295292653097,0.0,0.0,0.14487934060035995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038112534075908255,0.138515298554767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953438500498775,0.08646665803423476,0.0441939273414255,0.035710150747931615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23413574910640006,0.0,0.038849425950492435,0.0,0.03711430723541734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043360395975485404,0.0,0.03274694322341396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,socialistheux,2020/01/25,"Loss of primary carer (advice needed) I (F19 UK) rely heavily on my mother (F54) for support, I've been struggling with depression, suicidal attempt and ideation, anxiety and trauma since I was 12. My psychotherapist reckons I'll be diagnosed with BPD at 25.

My mother's boss unfortunately passed away in a car accident last night. My mother already does the job of two people due to cuts, as the most senior member of staff she will now have to undertake her late boss's job.

My dad is pretty useless with the emotional side, he tries but doesnt get it, my mother sees the ugliest side of my illness.

I already struggle going to college and I've not been able to hold down a job in nearly a year. 

I've talked to my crisis team but they're a bit useless. 

I don't know what to do. I can't look after myself.",3.958916666666667,5.352557725000004,5.466249999999999,79.62041666666667,71.75,8.083333333333334,28.333333333333336,8.59863814320734,2.198083333333334,636,24,119,11,12,215,109,160,0.239,0.73,0.031,-0.9861,3,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,1,9,1,2,8,0,11,2,0,2,0,16,18,6,1,1,3,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,2,1,0,3,4,8,0,1,3,2,16,1,23,13,2,20,0,4,2,0,10,9,0,1,8,69,18,9,0.156412047462504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528440425353496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3452091676136449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11965478819021515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695426736077394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17076144546392985,0.0,0.19699549831572966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347174672866364,0.158754935726708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687723677662475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175942500909281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171883912997059,0.0,0.08889257108998927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4656444669950541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595997075696707,0.12749669471982414,0.1764396023669498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313467264877293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597755130358968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467821109008824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843641959706883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591272834154588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464015109156408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12938566197848347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3270316654085076,0.0,0.17108939322140393,0.17749453789382805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257180789673056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619351307059424,0.0,0.1527918428114671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072423039543836
mentalhealth,terezze,2020/01/25,"Those who were in psych ward, what are some things that you wish you knew before going in? Hey there Reddit, 

in a pretty short time I'm supposed to go to the psych ward and stay with my depression and panic anxiety disorder. So my main question is basically the title. Just looking for anything that will help.",5.663135593220339,6.808926118644076,5.762500000000002,80.01968220338985,67.47457627118644,8.611864406779661,28.309322033898304,8.841846274778883,2.167640677966101,247,8,45,4,4,78,49,59,0.163,0.7140000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,8,10,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,1,4,0,7,7,2,8,0,1,1,0,6,4,0,2,1,31,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090232768847427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22484831683088852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325020257819021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23533606044332614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131498579950626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105703796893093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831430036061573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22944776045990545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32058125008209465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779772270240526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060846341510787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29123110962325915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815245413948425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15932495393952315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31420563767690873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-Endurium-,2020/01/25,"Any positive stories? Two months ago I had a panic attack out of nowhere, and it was genuinely one of the worst experiences of my life. I had never felt so depressed and anxious for no reason before. Ever since then, I've been alternating between days where I feel crushing depression and days where I feel normal, and I'm still not sure what causes one or the other. Last night I had my worst crisis yet since the initial panic attack, I had sort of an existential crisis about how life is meaningless, nothing matters, all that crisis stuff I hear about in the movies but never thought would actually get to me. After sleeping it off I feel normal again but at times it genuinely feels like my brain is breaking or I'm just falling into a mental void. I mean, what the fuck? Before all this I was leading a totally normal life, and I don't even know what triggered it really. 

Either way I'm 19 and still in my first year of college and I'm trying to get a therapist. But I need some positive stories to convince me that I'm not going to totally go insane or kill myself or something. I know depression never \*truly\* goes away but it'd help to hear some stories where people are able to cope with it and lead normal lives.",4.8138469111493984,6.0815012928870305,5.741476741324147,78.93935269505292,69.5439330543933,8.133989662810732,28.70317499384691,8.4952907291091,2.181409352695053,975,35,176,15,17,321,136,239,0.222,0.715,0.063,-0.9879,0,0,1,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,0,3,14,14,4,2,10,0,13,6,2,6,9,57,35,19,1,6,12,0,5,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,14,11,0,0,10,0,0,5,7,11,0,4,9,7,20,3,24,24,9,36,0,3,0,1,3,10,1,7,20,128,34,3,0.10026851380888016,0.0,0.0978476055704624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888819876356377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818602774388527,0.0,0.0,0.11327488030627715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22813981938048444,0.09420556936108107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064224025271604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193282219918012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300338391501744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932979279908666,0.0,0.2590833720560878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622640771588957,0.09069861122088284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808184652441147,0.0,0.0,0.20279509325406175,0.07163184629966035,0.09627349745924436,0.0,0.0,0.08528834662363942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269662531100352,0.10477232006969774,0.0,0.11396981417278815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260198047124452,0.0,0.0672078712365322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109322545132692,0.0,0.11020990588237267,0.08173222141450387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124678497863577,0.04898613108875493,0.0,0.08853893469757189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922180625994232,0.0,0.0,0.10104707851321547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003337110482682,0.0,0.0,0.0743478324915594,0.2319997776216333,0.0,0.0,0.09409520783422964,0.3929674180457718,0.09621034325639233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588907985286147,0.0,0.0,0.23528699379307966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951356249179398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423457746800185,0.10309273189292163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658863015378749,0.0,0.1003409265303995,0.0,0.0,0.0771916006064433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014912929978228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147834592794164,0.0,0.0,0.0945018876357506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641947272713653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960199986257344,0.05846737673998646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807573907812274,0.0,0.09794776840638496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958847914633738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122787536562535,0.0,0.0,0.06456963546056092
mentalhealth,blunt-therapy,2020/01/25,"You Are A Total Badass Struggling with mental illness is the hardest thing a person can do. People kill themselves because it gets so bad. Just remember three things:

1.  If your heart is still beating, you are a straight-up ninja.
2. Feelings are not facts. Feelings can change. Facts cannot.
3. Your illness is temporary and treatable. Make self-care a priority.

Keep crushing it!",2.0340610859728514,4.5697917500000065,2.2411764705882358,88.31106334841631,102.08823529411764,3.857013574660634,27.289592760180998,5.8734145424116955,1.3579669683257922,301,15,49,3,13,91,52,68,0.319,0.6809999999999999,0.0,-0.9744,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,4,0,1,3,3,1,1,5,0,10,3,1,1,3,13,15,3,1,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,2,4,0,1,15,1,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,32,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21226024130666032,0.1549680790337656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26892745354021425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570791013459069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281768043420913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012478935024263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259593935000051,0.2812530011741345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16969155367774125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561905391395503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17624178070575686,0.2219721284213191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879778497989582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652033550573757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030177041322121,0.0,0.0,0.2657623853357228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377804244080549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Morphiadz,2020/01/25,"What are the most basic things one should do to feel good? I'm not asking from a mental health perspective necessarily, just from a healthy perspective, but it can apply to mental health too.

What are the most basic important things one should incorporate into their daily schedule to feel good and healthy? For instance, I wake up at approximately the same time daily, I sleep at approximately the same time, I always do my hair, dress nicely, do my make up, eat certain healthy foods, etc.

I want to work on making some kind of schedule where healthy behaviors become natural. I sit around at home way too much and I want to change that.",6.3730128205128205,7.755998726495727,6.149647435897435,77.02139423076926,66.00854700854701,8.926923076923078,29.15491452991453,9.188382445141503,2.39995811965812,509,17,91,9,8,159,73,117,0.0,0.7390000000000001,0.261,0.9848,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,5,5,0,0,6,0,8,7,3,2,1,21,16,3,0,4,3,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,6,4,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,9,5,17,14,7,15,0,0,0,0,2,9,0,3,4,63,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312695909129275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15312628795378122,0.1608070962057743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18997267188558706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18196486521591765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17601022950648246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918377710172511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17394789342041644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079964240548332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28854938718381073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656793692643036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17254109116450692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17912302124718665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296374006206287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.346693327962149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264479012030228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331182554760414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721352574536828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22855297438346545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006020334031884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20291312799951813,0.13653435165412064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522608076940253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,char7476,2020/01/25,"Switching antidepressants and the withdrawals are hell. Help? I’m switching from Cymbalta to Trintellix. I was to start the Trintellix right away, but I wanted to try to taper down on the Cymbalta a bit first because I am on a high dose 120 mg. And I am kinda afraid of serotonin syndrome. The Trintellix is to be started at 10 mg. But going from 120 mg to 90 mg is hell already. I have the brain zaps, restless legs, and my body will jerk randomly. I thought it was caused by something else, but I remembered the brain zaps from when I tried to go off it before. I’m not sure if the other things are from it for sure. I’m also having a lot of anxiety, and I am moody and emotional. I’m absolutely miserable, is there anything that anyone knows might help?",3.555111856823263,5.2568076375838935,4.695453020134226,83.51396252796422,73.29530201342281,8.18814317673378,28.52404921700224,8.841846274778883,2.2808653243847874,594,24,117,12,12,195,88,149,0.191,0.763,0.046,-0.9748,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,3,9,3,3,10,0,15,5,4,1,2,21,26,11,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,7,0,1,3,0,10,2,21,20,2,14,2,1,0,0,2,8,2,5,4,77,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878202427930125,0.13610910352217626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13020274939155116,0.0,0.0,0.1190079940895294,0.0,0.1400603295660093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599087670004211,0.0,0.0,0.10375251178297368,0.0,0.14482790360521158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858146257727215,0.18905414369832735,0.0,0.3799996052493016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17484257279512955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218049546389902,0.19145240821283915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477227238886675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19345748434239413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281633218724936,0.179825941914266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353762352060813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446981928035125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805556020091248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928037402334432,0.14535011033385042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102849183420778,0.0,0.0,0.24093727034344545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208235019125795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307350417571665,0.0,0.0,0.1351200118541031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23110963762450884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038853569092353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,janssuli,2020/01/25,"Any advice? So I have been struggling a bit with my mental health recently. Probably the most severe thing is that I have had a few deep waves of depression I think. During these waves I have been unable to talk. My friends tried to cheer me up and ask me if I needed anything (a hug for example) and all I could do was to shrug my shoulders. I have also had a few panic attacks relating to my mother and some other things. I have noticed also that I over think a lot and I have strong fears of abandonment and cheating in my relationship. I know that she wouldn't cheat on me but I can't shut down the thoughts and fears.  I also have troubles to start to do anything like my homework for example. I just have a lack of motivation for everything.

I have made an appointment to a psychologist. I also started to keep my appointments and other things up to date with a calendar and I started a journal where I write about my day every night. Is there anyone with the same problems as I do? And does anyone have some advice for my situation?",3.1044444444444466,5.120692487804881,4.393130081300814,83.85088753387534,75.34146341463416,7.482384823848236,26.023035230352306,8.344100000000001,1.8068807588075881,820,30,159,15,18,270,111,205,0.154,0.7659999999999999,0.08,-0.9334,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,9,16,3,4,13,0,23,3,1,2,1,35,34,17,0,6,3,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,9,12,0,2,5,0,0,0,2,11,0,0,7,0,32,5,27,25,10,16,0,2,0,1,7,9,0,5,8,132,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498721027239996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4089746150618877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869441316204231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17879497885357346,0.0,0.2104235421709576,0.0,0.11952489380411654,0.1454507553848169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958189254381115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207987341546247,0.0,0.0,0.0824543304516973,0.0,0.11011923090420132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118846452929817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772130417490704,0.0,0.11490564562938553,0.0,0.0,0.2877393719960346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877857816752754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590130289319516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364123838479367,0.0,0.0,0.07026442865173904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062462307453273636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10869568267402016,0.0,0.12097719275837245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884531897225948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480106038907644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11998097565558773,0.0,0.0,0.145560997959365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000744312131964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13784669435842511,0.12233764229820512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623898829060468,0.13726581232666074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14443701192902858,0.0,0.0,0.14371164511084322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27148412057735144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365926557794372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027630525236769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548186986428937,0.16384552835563265,0.0,0.10150065903965397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680350233624898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-NeoRoseBud-,2020/01/25,Going to a mental hospital now Hey I’m kind of freaking out because this is my first time staying in a mental hospital. Does anyone have any advice? What should I expect? Will it be scary?,1.237297297297296,3.8792338108108098,3.2419459459459468,84.99967567567569,89.27027027027027,5.122162162162162,20.913513513513514,6.742157984588678,0.8630908108108106,149,5,26,2,5,50,33,37,0.18100000000000002,0.8190000000000001,0.0,-0.7804,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,4,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29855350723868784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077660943028216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136287622006487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18624396484433287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26736520719379936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598776795459813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736357428536525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181551548577457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6157905816792222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32564683156272545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781528989344592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Keeffahsgreenhoodie,2020/01/25,"Can you be manic/hypomanic if you feel tired? I woke up at 230 this morning absolutely still exhausted but unable to sleep. I've cleaned the kitchen, cleaned out the refrigerator, vacuumed my car, and am running out to the store. My husband jokingly asked if I have a secret coke addiction (I don't). Am I manic?? I feel so tired.",3.1085714285714303,5.460749619047622,4.987539682539683,78.00607142857146,76.61904761904762,8.644444444444442,31.13492063492064,9.2995712137729,3.163615873015873,258,13,49,7,6,88,46,63,0.13699999999999998,0.863,0.0,-0.8036,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,6,7,1,0,0,9,10,5,0,2,3,1,2,0,0,0,4,0,4,0,1,3,2,0,3,1,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,2,9,1,6,8,0,7,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,1,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3445919902669803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955076842456921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196559130593761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163249166696119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524351813968786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.726613165535042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Xeshok,2020/01/25,"Inferiority complexes Alright, I wanna try to stick to facts as much as possible. So my problem is, I'm a 24 y/o male, looking 17, I am very skinny, I probably weigh around 115 lbs at 5'7"". So in general, this makes it hard enough to get through life. I always had issues to find a girlfriend, but when I finally found my current partner, I kinda figured out that she was the type of woman that wants to wear the pants. No matter what it is, everything always has to be done her way, she even tries to point things out by facts and logic, she's always trying to call the shots, and can't accept it if she can't get things done her way. Now back to facts and logic, I think that because I'm unattractive to most of the women out there, those who want the man to be calling the shots, be in charge and everything, I automatically attract those kinds of women who wanna be in charge, taking the lead etc. Also I do not wanna be sizeist, but she almost weighs twice as much as I do, and to be honest, I like it. Still I don't like that gender role reversal, I do not want to be dominated by a woman, and just because there are relationships were the woman is bigger than her boyfriend, it doesn't mean that she has to be the one who's in charge and taking the lead. I also gotta mention that she's not physically stronger, but sometimes I start brooding, questioning if my brain actually works with it's left side, or if I'm a right-brained person, like any feminine individual should be. The upsetting thing isn't thinking about it, but comparing it, e.g if my girlfriend and I play video games together, and this game I am taking as an example is mostly about logic, analysis and pathing, so whenever she performs better than me, isn't it her using the left side of her brain more than I do?  I've read facts that men tend to use their left brain a lot more often than women, while women tend to use their right brain and intuition. So if I am right, and by that I don't mean right-brained, doesn't it mean that my brain works more the ""feminine way"" while her brain works more the masculine way? If so, I am trying to figure out how to change that, all of it, I wanna be the man wherever I go, and besides gaining weight, I'll do everything to change it, I don't care if I become an apathetic person, what matters to me is analysis and facts, even if I have to give up intuition and empathy for it, it's unwanted in a masculine individual if you're not into gender role reversal. I don't have facts that prove my emotions are blocking the analytical part of me, but it seems that logic and intuition are opposites, which creates the possibility that logic blocks intuition (people being reasonable leave any kind of emotion behind, and vice versa). So does anyone have any advice for me, how I could possibly start changing my mind to be less emotional and more reasonable?",9.672740052235364,6.464347888692579,9.685129820248886,69.45576048548165,61.2791519434629,13.02369027500384,38.389614380089114,11.119845054232373,4.000227623290828,2259,78,444,45,23,752,243,566,0.069,0.858,0.073,0.311,1,0,0,0,0,0,73.0,0,0,2,8,23,15,0,1,25,1,51,12,8,10,8,104,82,51,0,20,20,0,2,3,3,2,1,0,0,14,41,25,4,2,21,5,0,3,15,3,0,2,6,3,55,12,65,61,15,39,0,1,1,0,45,22,0,18,13,314,96,7,0.0,0.0,0.05887223084693526,0.0,0.0,0.058952629755235214,0.0,0.0,0.06041060394617169,0.0,0.0,0.0964898794150884,0.1505952461963403,0.0,0.0,0.12307700967652535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04218331728729411,0.0,0.0,0.0537054448720189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04638914269430164,0.0,0.07355178376676742,0.06662844762632145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335594330980943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5387753668117032,0.12320495137024902,0.0,0.06150925798574972,0.0,0.19145969320004985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816765791233752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05279416147178762,0.123474667778409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20358542489968667,0.0,0.06233580333187455,0.06728258729061387,0.07969324012544013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626589741646609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608727914501489,0.05513945327404565,0.0,0.0,0.06614744292987948,0.0,0.0,0.06303864236177327,0.05787290634353023,0.03428626163330545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05404277758056392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296761957659787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564637556947586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387951508059585,0.1966423352632544,0.0,0.04261203336640594,0.08842084998222967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050661018955988436,0.0,0.0,0.05128940979659497,0.0,0.0,0.040269959274750224,0.0,0.0,0.19714732989630712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06091491562615449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869725607520992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04088037327042317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533023867873203,0.0,0.04182441127864603,0.10535360632776936,0.0,0.0,0.05703023980331137,0.2040350574845819,0.0,0.0,0.06504467723210769,0.05772653812018993,0.0,0.0,0.06758209111208241,0.0,0.060345151026012935,0.0,0.0,0.1240561600921474,0.0,0.06477058082056951,0.0,0.2060819483216706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492109665997123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059666750716116726,0.0,0.08540210595925278,0.0,0.04817867772596079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360793055818849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12023937231919342,0.07731255042000147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16383724886131762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631420502320836,0.0,0.04977759892672525,0.1067505124875386,0.1915448534378489,0.0,0.07346425640022941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176030975158362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CommercialWalk7,2020/01/25,"I don’t like it when people say trauma is a cause of mental illness Most people who went through trauma don’t have PTSD or depression. That’s why trauma is a trigger for mental illness, but not a cause. Yes trauma can trigger mental illness, but so can tons of other things. At the end of the day, the cause is genetics and brain chemistry.",4.250597014925372,5.686111970149256,4.958388059701496,83.38026865671642,71.08955223880595,6.554029850746268,26.832835820895525,6.742157984588678,1.2938382089552245,270,9,49,2,5,87,44,67,0.297,0.679,0.024,-0.9527,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,6,1,8,4,1,5,0,11,9,6,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,1,1,1,6,8,2,5,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,4,35,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105858549493715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.581359119825208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216579036064911,0.0,0.16247630300524124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16708002294867882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216051282644247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5703175797973656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26155997321075714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205113510342092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001497421357726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253247646578095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17487218960758452,0.17021925149731273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,qwelianiop,2020/01/25,"Interesting title I feel like i have hit an all time low, even for myself. I had to sleep on the floor because everyone decided to visit today and even tho i worked all night it was deemed insufficient enough for me to be granted even a sofa. Thats just a little pebble in my shoe at this point im tired, im sad and i feel empty inside but at the same time there's a void in my chest that cant be filled with anything and im in the bathroom hiding because im on the verge of a mental breakdown but i cant let my 5yo nephew see this and i wanna kill myself but i cant bring myself to do that even tho it would be a welcome respite and im just tired and sad and i dont know what to do anymore",-0.3709829222011365,1.5525852451612927,2.2020113851992416,95.51478178368124,86.87096774193549,4.67931688804554,17.504743833017073,5.900188976854957,-0.4848519924098671,543,13,129,4,17,187,86,155,0.161,0.779,0.06,-0.9451,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,1,9,7,1,0,10,0,14,5,3,0,2,22,20,12,1,2,5,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,8,8,0,0,4,0,0,3,4,4,0,0,2,3,16,3,17,12,4,19,0,3,1,0,3,12,0,0,5,88,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12697600597222067,0.0,0.0,0.10536163848294232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15609751415047107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15005570010173674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229405793248405,0.0,0.3382628140637549,0.0,0.0,0.12234263063424355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294763699412877,0.09146800627422501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6914971663725571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14165141171129836,0.0,0.07036451580879055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092414250075673,0.0,0.06255128099074964,0.12832439271247287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12902885083785315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201518808345532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103416407862068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202706916558102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812715253840454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14931611172266868,0.29431407704806,0.1213619129695649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321077732634216,0.0,0.0,0.09095216844736873,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shortbus-doorgunner,2020/01/25,"Anyone recommend EMDR for trauma or ADD meds for anxiety? My anxiety has been untreated nearly my whole life. Recently, my sister whose also a psychiatrist linked certain forms of ADD to anxiety, at least in our family and the family she married into and had kids with. Her, her husband and one of her three kids especially prone to anxiety have gone on slow-release ADD medication and have praised it deeply, however she credits most of her recovery from crippling anxiety to learning about, becoming certified in/practicing, and having EMDR therapy done for herself. She recommends it VIGOROUSLY. 

About me: I have had crippling but somehow also high-functioning anxiety as long as I can remember. Experienced plenty of trauma, from parents divorcing, mother diagnosed with and fighting cancer twice, passing away from complications from cancer a week after my high school graduation, harsh breakups, being cheated on repeatedly, an abusive marriage in which I watched my stepson be emotionally and mentally abused repeatedly, took custody of him when she went and had an affair and fucked off for a year and she saw him and our son together maybe 4 or 5 times for a few hours apiece, then had custody of the stepson legally taken away by her... I could go on and on. 

Now I'm navigating an amazingly strong and healthy relationship, but I'm working far - commuting 4hrs a day because the money is good and the experience is what I need and the sellers of the house I bought scammed me and I'm trying to get the home I own fixed and paying $15k to get it done. 

I'm not taking care of myself either. I used to do BJJ 5-6 times a week, or was at the gym 5-7 days a week, eating right and losing weight and not drinking, meditating and pretty dang happy. 

TL;DR - life is fucking hard and I'm having trouble coping. Looking into EMDR, has anyone tried it or had experience with it? ADD meds helped anyone's anxiety?",8.912868513212352,8.450201702005728,9.282841451766958,63.042956860872366,60.63323782234957,12.569309137217449,40.30579433301497,11.855464076750405,5.131578669213626,1530,73,243,42,18,512,200,349,0.17800000000000002,0.735,0.087,-0.9895,2,0,1,0,3,0,45.0,2,0,0,4,7,17,4,0,18,0,24,11,0,1,1,48,45,33,0,2,9,5,2,0,0,0,6,0,1,2,8,30,3,0,3,2,5,5,2,8,0,3,15,6,31,9,46,27,7,39,1,1,3,2,30,17,3,6,17,172,39,7,0.0,0.21648853633409804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14611788832501324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4892202362670488,0.0,0.0,0.19163887286192216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17166766038504652,0.0,0.0,0.055690977083226983,0.1008977120558972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314555001828298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294191372584304,0.0,0.0,0.11783667939421312,0.0,0.0,0.09272642734448752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18698186614784412,0.0,0.0894960407437203,0.0,0.09348202180539422,0.0,0.10276543184431663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17873127070178246,0.17224834711191167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689179620764902,0.09546154851280368,0.0,0.05192084577975035,0.07662673976473815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725226925448537,0.08183880617489457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123532872251486,0.19304944503060315,0.09163950352086156,0.0,0.08996920832993319,0.10541484377548824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905768709584695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084893805531755,0.07671769469622687,0.10220621194168278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178137096468357,0.0,0.2029562427600032,0.09203355421255603,0.09206735692356068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774078509947494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06190653208836407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144222608403644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294391016320933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020498443659122,0.0980842815065876,0.10349078296399564,0.07801921634995401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245915384257226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868983184865829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447581286234453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654314646020396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150207805853882,0.124052144005747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890396274942654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198455844776505,0.11124940851455026,0.0,0.08468976338933695,0.0,0.101997922874781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06650969802103576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05883154428452056
mentalhealth,ginellet,2020/01/25,"Electroconvulsive Therapy side effects Hi!

I got ECT in 2017 and I’m dealing with ATROCIOUS memory side effects. My long and short term memory are shot. I don’t remember books after I read them, tv shows after I watch them, specifics told to me at work, exact things people say after they’ve said them, etc. 

I was just wondering if anyone had experienced severe permanent memory loss after ECT or knows anyone who has? It’s very isolating.",4.158796296296295,6.901531345679011,5.4031944444444475,74.35812500000003,75.04938271604938,8.988271604938271,24.939814814814817,9.516144504307137,2.7867888888888888,353,12,58,10,8,117,64,81,0.069,0.9309999999999999,0.0,-0.636,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,3,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,12,11,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,4,10,0,8,6,2,11,0,1,1,0,9,5,0,3,6,32,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34308857295367723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529301286539831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736139348756358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196217211794786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13482997514864953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21711419792845152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17008474561743991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454018920463732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27791729708115226,0.0,0.23337024250199803,0.19510063726274868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771592839025259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805625263378338,0.0,0.16299000534927724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23442858461302324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024274817520658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26605588527937074,0.17860716649636865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,neonstahli,2020/01/25,"Things are changing for me and I need help. Hi, I'm B. Prefer to stay at just B for now, if you don't mind. For a long time, longer than I can remember, I've dealt with mental illness and its many issues and symptoms. For a while, I thought I had things under control.

Recently, I've been having urges and cravings for past habits (I will not act upon them, but I will mention them) and my brain has felt...off. I can't dig myself out of the negative. My words and actions are annoying and frustrating my friends to the point where they get angry with me and tell me, but I can't take their yelling and their words seriously. Like, it refuses to process. I WANT to change, I WANT to heal, but I have a numbness that is making things much harder to do so. I'm not professionally diagnosed with anything anymore besides GAD and severe depression. I've been given meds for bipolar, bpd, psychosis, and others. No one wants to tell me what's wrong and it's ruining everything I have. I can't lose anyone else. If I do, then there's just no point. These two are really all I have left.

Any questions, ask me, be blunt and straightforward, I'll be honest. Thank you for reading if you have.",3.2014161462979485,4.8133661398305065,4.104210526315793,87.76068242640503,74.04237288135593,7.341302408563782,25.980374665477253,8.032893268588372,1.4479864406779663,923,32,192,14,19,297,143,236,0.175,0.726,0.099,-0.9648,0,0,0,0,1,1,41.0,0,3,5,2,6,12,2,0,5,0,24,7,1,2,1,42,37,22,0,8,10,0,0,1,1,2,6,1,0,0,10,17,0,2,4,1,0,2,9,8,0,2,5,1,32,4,23,28,2,18,0,3,0,0,17,8,0,4,8,130,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003257610169517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312994420121881,0.09257308250838904,0.13565347355584167,0.1089491218153983,0.0,0.12377067775484432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674582338591096,0.14779567994161275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801109556324953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849132020448025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11403090527059545,0.1343772964390303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059834121530823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898734384750563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711916610149024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228740790593097,0.0,0.06917048985062882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874102190648056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13818511718083895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14384665390339546,0.0,0.0,0.06468110434210549,0.0,0.0,0.11716467491493485,0.0,0.14811521195542265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837413703530117,0.13422690905689294,0.0,0.0,0.14706007757740966,0.0,0.13342218467787015,0.0,0.1336803711250581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732494897208237,0.0981686000530025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971371649039367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12638521669654532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503105698790249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14831177107289056,0.0,0.13242999849599155,0.0,0.08481509593095089,0.0,0.1307232714669508,0.0,0.14997678676214987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495677284485878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14111457041789718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13760823623510074,0.09954393974851047,0.0,0.23143668149506025,0.12189076471167,0.0,0.0,0.2638704125295122,0.0,0.0,0.105106183005608,0.07720010565187044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932986720039402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23426853637464676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144752242133438,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kiwirosey,2020/01/25,I don’t have happiness anymore My life has been crumbling. Recently my boyfriend broke up with me and he was honestly the only thing holding me onto reality. My friends all know that I’ve been planning to kill myself for a long time but it’s definitely becoming a reality. I only felt happiness around him. I never looked at other boys nor did I plan on ever losing him. What people have told me is that I’m too clingy but being honest it’s only because he doesn’t understand my emotions. I always feel like I’m doing too little and maybe that’s why I’d go overboard a lot of the time. I knew he had a problem with me being clingy so I started to distance myself. But I guess it wasn’t enough. I honestly tried so hard and I feel like a sack of shit. Last night I wrote suicide notes to my friends and family and stapled them to my bulletin board. I left and went to the river near my house and sat at the bridge trying to decide if I should or not. I ended up coming home after getting talked down by a friend. But honestly I can’t keep doing this. I’ve tried everything but I just don’t have the want to get up in the morning. It’s been this way for years and years. Ive never actually been so serious about it.,1.9911180124223613,3.898202031746033,3.948122843340237,86.27127329192548,78.28571428571428,6.763561076604555,23.65493443754313,7.7425588080867325,1.1993907522429264,960,32,197,15,23,326,143,252,0.102,0.733,0.165,0.9489,0,0,0,0,0,2,17.0,0,0,1,3,9,17,2,0,12,0,23,2,1,0,4,40,44,19,2,4,9,0,4,2,3,1,1,0,1,1,13,12,0,2,7,0,0,3,9,6,0,0,14,5,33,11,27,27,3,31,0,2,1,0,13,13,1,4,16,136,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.11779717149016875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044177470765328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971353479409665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10745897358625996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735847101522971,0.13331654938586546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398241025348157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357843749919984,0.10691470544988037,0.1247274174840364,0.0,0.0,0.10919061123281804,0.0,0.0,0.10848786034005567,0.0,0.11379621403930885,0.0,0.12207088889983447,0.17247287419091875,0.1159021278451029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797845972005259,0.0,0.12613372481338184,0.0,0.06860322062325121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297750738013864,0.0,0.0,0.2569996225438749,0.1081339410258502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210836415207006,0.0,0.0,0.13928505354425202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107294073596046,0.13354957162728318,0.0,0.06633997381669328,0.09839611757595364,0.0,0.0,0.13115357645982986,0.0,0.08526221836332233,0.11794724359088235,0.1209847997209553,0.0,0.10682602433120823,0.10136739600272723,0.1350454755041117,0.0,0.10262474029814277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127109154008328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862005542928784,0.0,0.0,0.11327971971342578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754199805288729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368626900983983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550476026902196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918820573284902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390878873102215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544033729127291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320389684486014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702346328799864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019546599584204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407758843819798,0.0,0.0,0.11534516822365667,0.0,0.24586588901444836,0.0,0.0,0.12566509966209188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119886713569082,0.09581530045608984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190092216478456,0.10892350153270196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546870824402606
mentalhealth,Sam__93__,2020/01/25,"How do I stop doing this? Ok, I have OCD, anxiety, depression and am bi-polar. There is one thing among my many mental health issues that I very badly want to come to an end and that is my driving habit of needing to pass everyone (AKA needing to be the fastest car in the group). No matter what, I always have to feel like I am the boss of the road. I will in city traffic regardless of it being busy or not feel the need to change lanes multiple times and be the person who goes faster than everyone else. I have never had a speeding ticket in my 9 years of driving, nor have I ever been in an accident - so in the back of my mind I am thinking ""this is fine"" but I had a close call the other day and almost caused an accident. How do I, in general, get better at this? I would not call it road rage, more like the inability to be with the flow of traffic. Any pointers please?",4.388211953792067,4.361180508287298,5.560974384731291,84.50048719236567,69.88397790055247,8.791762933199397,27.50426921145153,8.575989854853784,1.7226640883977895,676,20,147,10,11,226,110,181,0.129,0.7809999999999999,0.09,-0.8605,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,6,8,1,0,15,1,22,1,0,4,2,31,31,10,0,6,4,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,11,7,0,1,3,1,0,6,5,3,0,1,3,2,16,5,23,22,1,28,0,1,0,0,5,11,0,2,13,106,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062865293891435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347497489610985,0.0,0.0,0.1090851218201449,0.0,0.1227141346563532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233463169581333,0.13393665786402592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187067733632372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275955557676838,0.0,0.0,0.1647864973812682,0.1696937877453039,0.13818005146381504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10345195833561097,0.0,0.13816193794848108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400298033181235,0.0,0.14207671725717136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14510112087934646,0.0,0.3065595660341722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16221745263736095,0.11459779867439307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380823517914282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17050961238352594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742762446757314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673762658196858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263178684872706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616567680197846,0.0,0.16196959145840306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.356828633347077,0.1237190122447626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10869878566218516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006487902161338,0.0,0.17608333522998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411095219051486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657007845323582,0.10278502463162112,0.0,0.0,0.09353706507353604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323560457905358,0.09461468628195874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395151937042003,0.0,0.0,0.10329955832819848
mentalhealth,greenbeaheart,2020/01/25,"What is a reocurring dream that you have? Lately, I've been having a dream that my highschool education didn't count because there was a problem with the curriculum. So, I have to go back and redo the whole four years in my mid 30s. Then I worry my college degree no longer counts. In the dream, I drop out of highschool and just decide to get a GED and my college degree stays intact. Everytime I have this dream it is the same theme but it may have different elements.

I used to have reoccurring dream about all these contorted bridges that are impossible to cross but I have to. Then I end of falling in some river in my car. Literally, terrifying.

I don't really sit and try to figure out what my subconscious is saying and what it all means, but I am interested to know about others' reoccurring dreams. Anyone care to share?",3.740269541778978,5.926994981132076,4.869474393531,80.37919811320756,74.0314465408805,8.316442048517521,25.19362084456425,9.04235418022936,2.0937884995507643,658,22,124,15,14,216,96,159,0.084,0.768,0.14800000000000002,0.8611,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,8,0,17,0,0,1,2,23,23,11,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,12,8,0,0,4,6,0,4,3,1,0,1,3,1,16,3,19,19,5,20,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,2,6,93,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18225841061283315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20043021651362591,0.0,0.15889493843941493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657586059936107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27233254479129376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23086597073721835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13618325327283198,0.0,0.1481381729317964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325103725840815,0.0,0.2940340233942912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839334071235447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494148816298992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669844425775629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20728601801529828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778271677012371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17696994035149766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251251631832484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910157897196911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26471125310056665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16785546056077466
mentalhealth,IdKmI,2020/01/25,"I dont know, do you? Hi, this is me and how I am (sometimes). I have typed this out many different ways, but there is no nice way to do so, so Ill just have to jump in it.

 I dont know about personality disorters. I have struggeled with ""something"" for a long time now but never said anything about it but I need to know just kow crazy I am and if there are others thats going through the same shit. 

Big emotional upsetts is what started this the first time and every time since I can get ""episodes"". These makes me (with lack of a better word) crazy. To explain it as best as I can would be like your own head is your house, youre sitting strapped in a chair looking out the window that is your eyes at someone you dont know but this someone is in 100% control over everything you do. All the while youre sitting there watching, screaming in your own head to stop but you cant. I remember everything and sometimes that makes it so much worse. That said, I have never physically hut myself or others either in or out of an episode.

Thanks for reading. 

Side note. Why is it that I had so many arguments with my ex gf (7 months relationship). But not a single one with some of my friends that I have known for over 10 years, not even one agument bigger than what pub/club to drink the next beer?",2.8571028716830256,4.3596445648855005,3.4176990185387126,92.78082697201022,74.72519083969465,6.364521992002906,25.07161032351872,6.868970318607317,0.7260953834969102,1004,33,223,9,21,314,144,262,0.132,0.775,0.09300000000000001,-0.8977,1,1,3,0,0,0,35.0,0,10,0,4,14,8,1,0,10,0,27,7,4,4,3,46,42,21,0,4,14,1,0,1,2,1,1,3,1,1,20,11,2,2,7,3,0,2,9,2,0,3,3,6,28,6,33,37,10,34,0,0,3,0,19,14,1,4,15,162,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930598422317561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867639729112812,0.10001505450917753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12683515572000748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815041971155595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976065666358466,0.1107808703244879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720611866602666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469199549971682,0.0,0.09527952498177683,0.0,0.20326815419010735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619058351345153,0.0,0.0,0.08736968121826451,0.0,0.05908257694357141,0.0,0.06426917253172285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321169738004285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13048563982857445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485956305981355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055247929172398035,0.0,0.0,0.10007722853602484,0.0949634522053726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509710792126894,0.2293021691584723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902638751000024,0.0,0.08313095365653166,0.08385156558236348,0.17443722671666453,0.0,0.12026785594144827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532595061530925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874201472203263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311623775793367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141165106473464,0.12810397993073874,0.0,0.2151406708102663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608077942702065,0.09354560601479538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916341834208549,0.08705884682507209,0.22368916956851131,0.0,0.08004259462828084,0.0,0.0,0.09454465464920866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411405933859426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978234298504254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795242270041247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204219640370638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524392342351973,0.0803327906457959,0.0,0.0,0.07282344139710056
mentalhealth,flourencee,2020/01/25,"I feel like my mental issues aren't as big of a deal as they might be and I can't help but feel like all I've been going through is fake I have been struggling with my mental health for about 7 years at the least (18F), I've been self harming and I suspect I am struggling from some form of depression for the duration of those years, that have only been amplified by bullying throughout my middleschool years, social isolation, loneliness, family issues and issues regarding my sexuality.
I've had periods of self harm through those past few years in various ways and have dealt with suicidal thoughts and thoughts of not wanting to exist.
When I entered highschool things have improved for me to a degree, I met a lot of new people that have helped me feel better and that helped ease my problems and how I coped with some things.
I've improved a lot, yet lately I feel like I've been falling in that pit of depression once again due to stress, existential dread and a feeling of intense loneliness, which all lead to me telling my mom about how I've been feeling awful and need help during my lowest point.
She understood and found a therapist for me, yet at this moment I just feel like I over exaggerated my problems and don't need any help, and that all of this has been just some form of attention seeking.
Even writting this down feels like a plea for attention from strangers.
I feel like maybe all of my issues have been fake as fuck and that I'm fine.
idk, just had to get this out somewhere.",10.175471264367816,7.345863386206897,9.01224137931035,73.49272988505749,59.96551724137931,12.42528735632184,39.683908045977006,10.504223727775694,3.896735632183909,1202,45,232,20,12,373,143,290,0.27899999999999997,0.609,0.113,-0.9966,1,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,2,12,21,1,4,9,1,24,2,0,3,4,56,45,20,1,5,5,1,9,6,0,1,1,0,0,2,15,17,0,0,16,0,0,4,4,13,0,0,15,9,27,8,41,28,14,28,0,2,0,1,14,9,1,6,20,155,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05841392128574952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597023719094906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855757519159027,0.1479684934727511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056735144946185076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097745506924613,0.0,0.3908957342799305,0.3681954062804168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418326464174473,0.0,0.07941177325522028,0.044878417617057305,0.0,0.0488180934886456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913060819848266,0.0,0.0,0.28787974824839696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3586228410812571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689724234356432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25179399066271724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460556551312905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862965824416031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313095617174284,0.09112472736572808,0.0,0.1006032776227879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12738528929242415,0.0,0.08296130046139318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147909234327443,0.0,0.06532967517632103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199983183259589,0.059551199887161975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120184137233173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16438651520933462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792217253425866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756269685211167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839643428718066,0.17959951230905402,0.0,0.09395901019380844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507906960374641,0.0,0.0,0.0997347717857236,0.11413428468177875,0.0,0.0,0.13638761805060848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05066515712438411,0.06818222603564973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22126325454299475
mentalhealth,Cusack01,2020/01/25,"SURVEY ALERT! The Affectiveness of CBD oil in Treating Anxiety Research on cannabidiol oil (CBD oil) is still in its infancy, but there is mounting evidence to suggest that people can get relief from anxiety with CBD oil.  


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All surveys are completely anonymous and will only take a maximum of two minutes to complete.

[https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/ZB2K258](https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/ZB2K258)",11.294666666666664,13.716579355555556,9.402222222222225,54.37000000000002,55.444444444444436,11.333333333333336,40.55555555555557,11.20814326018867,5.456555555555557,482,23,57,12,6,146,61,90,0.077,0.828,0.096,0.5938,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,5,0,9,0,0,2,1,10,13,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,3,2,14,12,1,7,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,2,1,41,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081509604597986,0.0,0.5436385720557073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5588203324069535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282017394916962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702373272449831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231672823131634,0.0,0.0,0.19501765871409504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17859767133020313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187974485556062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4007353058939659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17354829778257594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Regenerated0617,2020/01/25,Bounderies I'm slowly starting to realize I really need to work on my boundaries. I was wondering if anyone knew of any books/ websites that may be able to help me get a better idea of where to start. It's beginning to interfer with my job so it's becoming a major issue. Thanks everyone.,3.3578947368421046,5.4326904035087775,5.62442105263158,75.04294736842105,74.78947368421052,9.472280701754386,28.94385964912281,9.888512548439397,3.38809754385965,231,10,40,7,5,81,46,57,0.0,0.847,0.153,0.8176,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,12,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,2,9,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,3,25,8,3,0.2630218355382907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17886386756909506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839109829706589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904869527759197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326214392908702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25132863540997324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13741805324283465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762979920989737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969196371948745,0.0,0.2745264610837687,0.26100858683674066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19502735831406576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849852290484513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723364179199203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421551680655884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28523596088094944,0.1914830288468179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,exulansjs,2020/01/25,"I found this on Twitter and I would like to read your opinions. ""Hey mental health twitter, I'm about to really piss you off: If you have a mental health episode, you still owe the people you exploded on an apology. You still did it! It's not their job to roll over and let you treat them however you want :)""

""Oh, and guess what else? People are allowed to be done with you whenever they want. They don't owe you endless patience while you refuse to find help and treatment for your mental health, and make up excuses every step of the way.""",2.1393138936535148,4.537281301886793,2.751200686106348,92.50126072041168,80.32075471698113,6.118696397941681,21.900514579759864,7.348242739294969,0.7382754716981137,422,13,87,6,11,131,73,106,0.047,0.8440000000000001,0.109,0.5857,5,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,12,4,0,3,3,1,0,4,0,8,4,1,2,0,18,16,7,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,2,1,2,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,18,2,14,10,0,10,0,0,0,0,21,5,1,3,4,58,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16917743442576458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810174993649638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928731724632729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109740983119355,0.0,0.0,0.18126235753530828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18211611719180948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5271750477381376,0.0,0.0,0.1108089893733563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16405233764040986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16904857909009635,0.0,0.0807658921401029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11035086819198647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4998041647431296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292209964618062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536246688166972,0.0,0.10590677075611406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26404590474643186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19501736025387695,0.13122151881481225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11743697187936067,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Darth_Memer_1916,2020/01/25,Does anyone have a definition of the Power Threat Meaning Framework? This probably doesn't belong here but I am being asked to write an essay on the PTM Framework which is an alternative idea that blames mental health issues on a person's situation rather than chemical imbalances in the brain and how it would be helpful in schools. However I am coming across wildly different definitions ranging from people suffering trauma in their lives to wealth inequality. I feel like this is the right place to ask for a proper definition.,10.001935483870973,10.237459301075274,9.554322580645165,59.69148387096777,58.13978494623656,12.601290322580645,37.95483870967742,11.979248473330829,5.026855483870968,437,18,63,12,5,141,74,93,0.132,0.758,0.109,-0.3291,3,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,1,3,5,1,0,9,0,9,2,1,1,0,10,14,3,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,5,2,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,3,0,0,0,2,4,2,13,11,0,9,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,0,1,45,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465048746667895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3917555112254975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23389939039976035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18048738637948006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189092136169821,0.0,0.0,0.18335689336343886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594222444374103,0.1496848275020319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227154641040192,0.0,0.0,0.1404403087801856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365284200578913,0.0,0.2186898472518708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023634174014997,0.0,0.18501456896668814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282343409255017,0.0,0.0,0.21115209642316107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14525837526381385,0.18294930180127392,0.2189092136169821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22590357749085846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17893335536136326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212050663989189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355150764313695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14884067336249032,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lonewolfstands,2020/01/25,"If you can’t talk to the people that means so much to you abut real things and issues that hurt you, who do you go to? Where do you turn when home isn’t home?  Who or where is the real love?
When your needing to heal from old childhood wounds where do you turn to? 
Who can I really confide in when I really need a friend to talk to? Pour my soul out to safely? How can people break your heart and live with themselves?
Sometimes I wonder why the hell I am here if I have got to suffer lie this. What’s the got damn point of it all really. But if I say things like this I’d be locked up and my kids taken from me. How do one pour out the pain that’s poisoning them!",1.349375000000002,2.680558520833337,2.6927777777777813,97.13,78.375,5.911111111111111,16.166666666666668,6.42735559955562,-0.6519333333333335,513,6,126,4,12,166,86,144,0.14300000000000002,0.772,0.085,-0.8799,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,8,1,0,10,10,3,0,6,0,12,6,1,2,1,21,23,14,0,5,5,0,0,1,1,0,4,1,2,1,12,6,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,3,1,18,4,17,19,2,15,2,2,0,1,18,8,2,5,6,86,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651393857993507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570769993125485,0.0,0.24122997574848334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787082856782742,0.0,0.0,0.30254557496743995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16144315496437678,0.0,0.0,0.1574044409325172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367720399689076,0.0,0.13316628622009827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361101685375879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16427419601973678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086128154950546,0.22364454181051807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582476978202594,0.0,0.10219144924028664,0.0,0.16047041620062244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20910265050240745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256236892626448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3433051929951983,0.28983452842127744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992862798557287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14915303455779236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424276237247247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003803574518844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32807174285226715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608082390322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16354491577631652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rainybab,2020/01/25,"Can anyone give me recommendations/advice about types of therapy? Hello! I was wondering if anyone could recommend types of therapy that have been helpful for them or just give general advice for finding the right therapy. 

A little info: I’m 23F, from NZ, currently in the middle of getting diagnosed for bipolar type 2. I’ve had anxiety since I can remember. Periods of depression and suicidal thoughts since high school. Traumatic childhood. I have an appointment for psychiatric evaluation in early February to work out a proper diagnosis and a plan, I’m guessing we will talk about therapy at this appointment and I’d like to know what options are out there. 

I’ve had some CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy) but I didn’t find it very helpful; the therapist spent the first session talking about my childhood and anxiety etc which was good but the rest of the sessions were focused on teaching me tools to help with anxiety. I’m quite self aware and I’ve already been using these tools for years, the problem is that I’m getting worse despite them so I obviously need something further than that. I’m taking some medication but that also needs to be changed and I feel like it’s only treating the symptoms. 

I found talking about my childhood other problems quite relieving, it’s like I need that stereotypical therapy you see in movies where they lay on a couch and talk about feelings haha! 

Sorry that this is a bit long, I hope it’s okay to post this here! Thank you ❤️",5.175874360613812,7.529764033088237,5.811144501278772,74.46313938618927,70.43382352941177,9.436317135549873,34.25255754475703,9.867487886160001,3.931182033248082,1195,61,196,32,23,387,163,272,0.08900000000000001,0.758,0.154,0.9675,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,1,2,3,5,11,13,0,0,14,2,18,4,0,1,1,41,43,14,1,8,6,0,2,3,0,1,4,0,1,1,17,11,0,0,10,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,11,3,19,10,31,29,5,24,0,1,1,0,17,14,0,8,12,122,36,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16795833469833266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948364685224412,0.06872585467810279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972306407539133,0.0,0.0,0.12018191135902853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938237681202672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909126852221504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686157652581795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401963820411064,0.08722686925671908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584535382429796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690727224083436,0.06139525634063633,0.0,0.0,0.15709444661818175,0.07310016667617593,0.0,0.0942283186109178,0.0,0.0,0.08979977175477033,0.1648821607105443,0.0,0.07208204610532536,0.0,0.0,0.09467214124471683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728104758914306,0.09079988943824904,0.0,0.08535739850938237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0472301481286666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259572200365461,0.08613404081115149,0.0,0.07605382792433239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657509008414348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911693389178337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536092660068689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230636605874986,0.0,0.0,0.1644651519503404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828146532634392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735279632136708,0.07339193559983187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697544761269589,0.06848272221354651,0.0,0.08965372936379673,0.0,0.0,0.14218022475243966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616049077879313,0.0,0.09620232887393323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09400395688752212,0.0,0.0,0.08932413397804083,0.06461587223316148,0.27629993076031834,0.0,0.07912162306324096,0.5896764275308793,0.09978248140112723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822643055080888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422420813229381,0.0,0.07090915753653748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931978134564988,0.06256504105385056,0.0,0.0875797786328811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05534227478011237
mentalhealth,Lamia_Eventine,2020/01/25,Gollum arguing with himself When I have “bad days” what goes on in my head is similar to when Gollum is arguing with Sméagol. The side that is Gollum is the part of me that despises everything about myself and the Sméagol  side is the part that actually likes me.,10.757799999999996,7.5934819800000035,10.208000000000002,66.40400000000002,59.2,14.8,43.0,13.023866798666859,5.4110000000000005,209,9,39,6,2,68,32,50,0.21100000000000002,0.742,0.047,-0.8658,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,3,0,4,0,6,1,1,0,0,3,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,1,7,6,2,7,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.3279237368280571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805769432156053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21671613061258896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30200847875333364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34487101252826985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417075375243306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7277908680273467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alliethecat01,2020/01/25,"a little vent everyone has been telling me to “just stop.” stop what? stop feeling irrational things? stop feeling worthless? stop telling people how i feel? stop being depressed? anxious? traumatized? crazy? 

i don’t know what to do. i don’t have the funds to seek help. i feel like the people who i could always count on have turned their backs on me. and a lot of the time, i don’t know if expressing how i feel is worth the backlash it brings. why do i feel like this?

i’m toxic. i’m poison. i break everything i touch. i am broken. i need help.",-0.4267431192660531,1.5884746513761492,0.9336651376146784,98.0757270642202,105.23853211009174,4.014862385321101,17.376605504587154,5.985473137389443,-0.22926458715596265,423,13,90,5,20,133,64,109,0.311,0.562,0.126,-0.9655,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,4,5,1,0,6,0,13,1,0,2,0,22,26,4,0,3,2,0,7,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,1,0,6,8,0,2,1,3,3,0,0,1,7,15,2,6,23,1,13,0,2,0,0,7,3,0,2,10,53,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112955049582207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15088061718401638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269655993223982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663384749719967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11503185576020555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276187794756602,0.12003180139871895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40518050536886,0.19082531185203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903996127603855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467981124708659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049773563466568,0.13385851105229793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354480038089265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990303130075232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18518226076360475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6699543421573463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23346820671277646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872887913281607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787775951567888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452709157154834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051379815810673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dull-Concept,2020/01/25,"Childhood traumas play a major role in everyone *Eliminating and identifying the childhood trauma is good for mental health.
*Many psychological movies revolve around CT’s which is shown in prime’s 4 more shots please,Joker the movie etc.
*Like mark Manson a latest gen writer states that 
It is better to face CT’s by going to the core reason for that trauma by like peeling the petals of an onion.It will tell you what really happened instead of what you think happened.
*How to do it is simple :Start questioning why
Like 
Why I was abandoned in a group?
Why I was bullied then?
What did they do wrong?
What did I do wrong?
What is my understanding level at that time?
What is my maturity level at that time?
Be curious about yourself 
Start with many why’s by facing the problem instead of trying to think only from your point of view and perspective(Sometimes narcissism).
Create better thinking create better u.",4.239609017259596,7.100912023952103,4.633990841845723,79.335973934484,75.46706586826349,6.56414230362804,24.19478689679465,7.724431198458867,1.5367156745332866,736,24,121,11,17,232,103,167,0.145,0.7190000000000001,0.136,-0.5661,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,3,1,3,5,15,0,0,9,0,15,3,2,2,0,13,24,4,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,13,4,0,1,6,1,0,1,0,7,0,0,4,1,9,8,22,18,3,19,0,1,1,0,8,9,0,1,11,76,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191577024300949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35514676198686984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14928167030749093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279024428882234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607184282482993,0.11226969083457664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367318375337311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227966357015284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19618169732894192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714122165336095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348925157131811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180136966975532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653451358971066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12807940923004854,0.0,0.0,0.14994618742154273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574977008661128,0.13762335498855552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323842106465064,0.0,0.18948392947952367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699357295997342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573031253817429,0.0,0.0,0.15610172311069087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087751806778953,0.0,0.0,0.1393458736078825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4831266761675912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926948639560333,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,juliandeandre,2020/01/25,"I'm a terrible conversationalist. I'm 22 years old and ever since I can remember, I've always struggled talking to people. Before my teen years, even in middle school I would always be the quietest in class and never really said much. I kept telling myself that it'll probably get better as I get older, but it never does. It gets worse. I know this might not seem like a major problem to some, but not having any sort of human connection  in years is really making my mental health deteriorate. Almost every time I try to go out and socialize I run into  a situation where I'm trying to talk to somebody and I cannot for the life of me think of what to say. The other person then gets the impression that I'm being rude or don't like them, when that's not the case at all. I just don't like myself really. I feel like everything I say is boring or uninteresting so I just don't say anything at all. My biggest issue though is I don't know how to be present. Every time I'm with somebody it's like I'm not really there. I mean I'm there physically but my mind is just somewhere else entirely. I know I'm not the only one with this issue, but I have never come across a person who is more anti social than me. I'm sorry if this isn't the right subreddit, but I just really needed somewhere to vent.",3.3441011235955083,4.577403962546821,5.482417602996254,79.5341882022472,73.04494382022472,8.186441947565543,23.087827715355807,8.697196308434329,1.51090277153558,1026,26,203,19,20,359,141,267,0.145,0.838,0.017,-0.9838,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,1,13,12,1,1,11,0,20,2,0,2,6,51,46,18,0,4,17,0,1,5,0,3,2,4,0,3,13,9,0,1,8,0,0,3,14,5,0,1,2,5,26,7,24,38,6,29,0,0,0,0,14,12,0,8,19,133,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273014195799936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072798492722568,0.0,0.0,0.06976544872321633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442371306654757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872974482916203,0.0,0.0,0.09073346850502802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837312673000942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977814072812265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570167862590009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776043721127381,0.09279950042206234,0.17287481012800518,0.0,0.0922022427363218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05187312983269099,0.07329108419013927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143984087440964,0.0,0.05830487190522095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904951492075596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21415685576078827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691441148289361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246310996576784,0.25060408486163505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848033892566485,0.0,0.0,0.1117517558392805,0.0,0.0,0.10338767351463346,0.10883291781340644,0.10358773991417727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541624410848792,0.07606998188624225,0.23737368380300056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765207511235156,0.0,0.06951836722421499,0.07802513516122908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112373370399552,0.179157138430244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106105300920456,0.09816580316123097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286123469044012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621568858264085,0.08761221715698447,0.09758760506060953,0.2447536206691907,0.0,0.10382764456735348,0.0,0.09339506126101882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486439705282918,0.11531666624357285,0.0,0.2091573619041675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484230875537756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072504660782695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16491763935905948,0.08966912108166906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573621815516588,0.10079520990735864,0.0,0.11964336122513868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930521079153882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045490696141578,0.07287775591136128,0.0,0.0,0.1981958653782045
mentalhealth,luceario,2020/01/25,"DAE live and breathe their trauma? I carry a lot of trauma from childhood abuse.

I now work with children experiencing traumatic home situations, and I’m doing a degree in psychology with a heavy focus on childhood trauma. 

It’s like my brain is wired to the trauma and I don’t know how to be a functional person outside of it. I am very effective and dedicated to my work and sometimes I think it’s helpful and healing for me to be able to be the person that can understand and help children like I wasn’t helped, but other times I think it’s damaging because I’m reliving my trauma constantly. It also serves as a reminder that while I’m here, living and breathing my work to ensure my children are supported, I am confronted with the reality that when I was a child, nobody picked me up and cared for me, and that if they had maybe things wouldn’t be as bad as they are. When I’m not at work, or focusing on work, or talking about work, I feel empty and devoid and distressed.

Just wanted to get that off my chest. It’s a realisation that came to me recently, after years of insisting that I just find psychology really interesting and enjoy working with children.",6.638742799051169,6.645832528634366,7.646431718061674,71.34237546594376,65.12334801762114,10.685055913249746,33.7610979329041,10.389873798559362,3.5142168078617417,932,37,169,21,13,316,123,227,0.14,0.733,0.127,-0.5001,0,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,0,0,3,8,9,15,1,1,10,0,16,5,4,3,0,37,30,25,0,3,7,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,7,15,18,0,0,7,0,0,1,4,9,0,0,4,2,24,6,29,21,1,18,0,1,0,0,14,6,0,4,13,122,39,7,0.1281142548753605,0.1517944426293137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245292333742036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10697005148492483,0.07809726065849741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430178783688539,0.0,0.1465285775504853,0.13062102121292934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844599609739675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477841666763191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170941079706581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669344104515057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576168535310913,0.0,0.12850904343783726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040824400228278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12518030726225365,0.0,0.2262544684337993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891815808592216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12870798874853934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22372885151998365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207327222613978,0.0,0.12649737087054827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400579025676435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267082739447463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538253820995134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297338518709163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08511341824333361,0.1641808829944966,0.0,0.0,0.07470445228536897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337145751711674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570767748235282,0.07556510685137474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6528809236787163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250137974889174
mentalhealth,Xxx_LaH_xxX,2020/01/25,"Hey everyone i need some help Last March I started seeing someone who turned out not actually exist. And I had seizures and got diagnosed with dissociative seizures. And then started my mental health issues I was so suicidal for up until about December. And things start to look up but recently, happy hear voices in my head telling me to do things that kill my girlfriend and random people on the streets and I'm seeing the figure again. What do I do?",4.23,6.860714142857147,4.659761904761903,80.35607142857144,74.23809523809524,7.533333333333335,28.357142857142854,8.472884824447931,2.3956000000000004,364,15,62,7,8,115,63,84,0.109,0.815,0.076,-0.615,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,2,0,5,3,1,0,0,14,16,10,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,5,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,5,9,1,11,13,1,15,0,0,3,0,6,6,0,2,9,44,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.18458124847898505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19198132729591544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18073910338770727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15127900459565094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20135165635846955,0.0,0.0,0.19412050701915914,0.20105557206946686,0.21318364149829228,0.0,0.1267819759934812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19742146115401127,0.0,0.0,0.20926433421922103,0.0,0.0,0.15418093658700724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883675535289601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906167841142727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025091020869254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13113146792046373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867609174298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014530733345422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026456074618278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4016399696576317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068973077690089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653237655311185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513231692851288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20573880398014086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jtownesvanzandt,2020/01/25,Natural Selection? I feel like nature doesn’t want me to pass on my genetic curses. Since I was very young I’ve felt inferior/inadequate. Every year I keep getting worse and worse and I have some sort of compulsion to self destruct. I have no desire for sex either so could this be nature wanting me to politely die? I feel I should’ve died in the womb.,0.9772857142857134,3.5758435857142885,3.1542857142857166,84.91571428571432,91.71428571428572,6.8000000000000025,21.285714285714285,7.908726449838941,1.5606857142857145,281,10,54,7,10,95,54,70,0.253,0.631,0.11599999999999999,-0.9129,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,6,2,1,0,0,13,13,3,2,4,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,3,10,1,7,9,2,5,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,2,3,31,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18910416765834392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49162247257103203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199554984577219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395153259418172,0.1692045378315253,0.22741159811614695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237435087235348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21052173241786826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571216015224492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470845264935113,0.0,0.0,0.1959234365318199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19542472731808275,0.2793986350453493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4827374898394423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252259840335966
mentalhealth,sailorkatbat,2020/01/25,"Huge Supporter of Daylio App I do genuinely believe anyone can benefit from this app. It's a free mood tracker diary, but they have one time deals to get premium access for cheap! It's motivational with goals and achievements (like snapchat) and the variations on moods/colors/activities). You don't have to write if you don't want to but sometimes you want to say something but maybe not publicly?

A previous therapist recommended I go back and read the ones I wrote in the past helping me visually see what caused certain moods, etc.

Anyone else have a good experience with Daylio?

[Daylio App](https://www.daylio.net)",5.459090909090911,8.624981407407414,4.955757575757578,77.01954545454547,72.8888888888889,8.742087542087543,30.188552188552194,9.339509955726095,3.2550259259259264,504,22,82,13,11,153,79,108,0.025,0.795,0.18,0.9417,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,3,1,3,1,8,0,0,6,0,7,0,0,2,1,17,14,7,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,1,2,1,3,0,0,2,1,2,8,7,11,13,1,7,0,0,1,0,10,3,0,1,4,48,12,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28645068067134155,0.20987758418858604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750541155928946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23077881357444985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21042188959934727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21117581064119467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17111329375564105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22844508405376765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003678587694518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701779266282507,0.0,0.11641240677738607,0.17180581451538318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729653069658893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007199643422897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057842111557816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776028890676748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955381109095058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20489035355954505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289295170105392,0.0,0.0,0.16322691302265682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15769193053120453,0.20258697579039128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324442424456706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378291324643768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944089044390298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416338885489573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ilachilla,2020/01/25,"Does being mentally unwell for a long time make you dumber? Hello,

I struggled with depression and social anxiety in my teen years. Although I am well now, there is something that has been on my mind. My thought process is slower than what it used to be before I struggled.

Before, I was the kind of person who could do calculations in her head in seconds. Words came naturally to me, I did pretty fine in maths, and I had a teacher who even suggested that I did this test to skip a few grades, as I was basically learning nothing new in school (my parents refused though, because I already struggled making friends, being in a group of older people would only make it harder).

Of course, when I had my mental health problems, my grades dropped. When I started getting therapy, they went up again, but I still didn't feel like my old self. I actually needed to study to memorize things, speaking and writing didn't flow as well as it used to and while I was good at maths (I did understand the concepts), I was relying on my calculator and memorisation to make fairly simple calculations and sketch graphs.

I do feel like I'm improving slowly over time, though. Being in university as a Physics undergrad, which is very much a maths-oriented course, helps, and I'm also actively practicing a new language, English, as I'm originally from southern Europe and decided to study in England (so sorry for any mistakes, still learning!). But I still need to study and actually try to understand some stuff that might have come as obvious, had I kept the same skills I had when I was younger.

I was wondering if anyone else went through something similar. 
I did not take any medication, just therapy with a professional, so it's not any sort of side effect. Does mental illness make you ""dumber""?

Anyway, I wish you a great day. Sending positive vibes to y'all",7.754566518336659,7.725327043731781,7.894841184594142,70.61420285407398,62.819241982507286,10.952831057234926,37.586159275740364,10.5429385540328,4.070163848396502,1468,67,253,32,19,478,197,343,0.08,0.8079999999999999,0.11199999999999999,0.9503,2,0,2,0,0,0,51.0,0,4,1,2,19,15,0,3,12,0,32,4,1,9,1,55,59,28,0,8,6,1,2,2,1,2,3,1,0,2,14,13,0,2,11,0,0,6,4,6,2,1,22,3,39,9,41,30,4,41,0,1,0,0,21,14,0,5,22,178,53,10,0.0,0.0,0.17365937437335233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09818942926526816,0.07115566987834278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18152426188620527,0.0,0.06806792208023263,0.0,0.0,0.06221548244154451,0.09116847007209873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424015944881528,0.0,0.15142743918559184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017671214474494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664666342162521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104168822678167,0.0,0.0,0.057383445344380876,0.0,0.07663661609208322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557304848119859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432969681355706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587691260500693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899798947944751,0.12713179378364184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874417766077792,0.0,0.04648732957968475,0.0,0.0,0.07463052006918461,0.0,0.09809855281291187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131709228259764,0.09457944712036996,0.0,0.0,0.059640073989834314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265688873929563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694030710560602,0.0,0.0,0.07874272496304552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29696751053461873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963596827669397,0.2690066711579893,0.09439159085456378,0.08984240944722259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654090637345698,0.13195211064415205,0.0,0.17187100266397132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537678526082511,0.0,0.09336743728649836,0.0,0.0,0.06767177415143726,0.0,0.0,0.0987995328115382,0.0,0.0,0.06168613785901365,0.07769215256350907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905226083484747,0.0,0.08513992378474239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900504805191159,0.0,0.0,0.09282345341287083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070185990477103,0.0,0.13699921413548882,0.0,0.099603579860061,0.06297908231815644,0.0,0.21317382350718064,0.0,0.0,0.2790573564437017,0.10185851565125027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06690037825006409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035081819350904,0.0,0.059113025704440124,0.0,0.17484085522704368,0.07063858851940659,0.10376756801274437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060410217446747176,0.0,0.0,0.18525846004464688,0.0,0.15369683725521338,0.0,0.07341616380987508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16000380536935666,0.1649669842586968,0.0,0.0,0.10232030222334898,0.0,0.09649283924885006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320741423268716,0.0,0.0,0.05729891105777544
mentalhealth,Dr-dre-dre,2020/01/25,"Never in a good mood to talk I always see people at my job talking, laughing and sparking conversations with people, but I feel like it’s just bs. I don’t get any enjoyment from speaking to people and been like this for awhike. I have treatment resistant depression. Vyvanse helped me become more social but after my second week in of taking the medicine I just feel energy and more direct. 

The only way this can be truly fixed is to re-wire my brain and think positive and not negative. I can make my self feel and negative and a horrible mood instantly and pretty much feel this 24-7 all the time.

I'm trying so hard to think positive but my brain litterly can't function that way. Medicine will only mask the problem I just need to figure out how to help myself feel happy. I just feel in a bad mood and see no point of sparking a conversation with anyone. Is their a way to fix this without trying these medicine? 

Its strange, I hold my breath up to a minute sometimes and it feel natural for me to be stressed out. It's weird it's like I need to keep worry about anything possibke because I don't feel good when I'm relaxed. Everything for me has to be done under pressure and stressful environments. It's my brain that needs to be re-wired and think positive and take it day by day. 

I just need this anxiety to stop it's just 24-7 general anxiety and sometimes a few panic attacks today. I've already seen the psychiatrist 6 years. She said I was treatment resistant to depression and the only way is to do therapy to change my out-look on life but I've seen the therapist and years and can't change my wiring of my brain, it's like my brain has to automatically find problems and come up with multiple solutions 

It's quit amazing how I can instantly make my self freeak out and have a panic attack. Imagine if I could think happy and feel happy.

Anyone have any specific remedies for this because medication does nothing for me.",4.308776769509983,5.893875547368424,5.326134301270418,80.21552631578948,71.15789473684211,8.609800362976406,29.41923774954628,9.130062681391069,2.557396551724138,1548,62,291,32,29,509,181,380,0.174,0.636,0.19,0.9119,1,0,0,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,1,1,11,29,2,5,15,0,25,8,6,4,2,73,56,29,0,8,13,0,10,4,0,1,2,2,0,2,19,27,0,3,16,1,0,1,10,13,0,1,6,16,34,13,44,44,5,28,0,2,4,0,13,12,0,1,15,183,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965712984905532,0.0,0.060063089869230576,0.0,0.0,0.09817554909269044,0.0,0.1104415281415306,0.0,0.0,0.10094583094232834,0.0,0.05940149843825116,0.0,0.0,0.16424004138879353,0.0,0.0,0.060270844960509815,0.08800571419098867,0.07972184790765967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029075546890347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15272275917683475,0.062180351452891865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576332607911243,0.0,0.0,0.09310575672325216,0.0,0.12434440091808605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316893551041672,0.07386956349550625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06487456164819036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284867930984526,0.05156845233313225,0.0,0.0,0.06597510919477602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037713298431144175,0.0,0.0,0.12108947108334805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23052447256343006,0.06466292174400255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676718061331986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163174340034159,0.06416069014702615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05098588011722955,0.14106234009199364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060616601345832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636711293513688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271805139912396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05306373936784623,0.21409486723956528,0.05567295410074798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926274773675746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469815562734128,0.0,0.169385360713255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15013043858460273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823746111024262,0.0,0.0,0.07343734678413336,0.0,0.1381411831193696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677684966659147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866376470590746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150430247092216,0.0,0.15060785945849745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358276635324977,0.0,0.0,0.1427841648784072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060349276560169224,0.1653736601186445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085471655572866,0.11603795356768065,0.0,0.0,0.08254899633825873,0.08381149363179538,0.0,0.1850110457474248,0.0,0.0,0.042091224590892234,0.0,0.06842224160069328,0.0,0.0,0.098016753358752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22918603415329525,0.05790186216574183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958305420111274,0.0,0.0,0.07330662358508512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929685981982416
mentalhealth,Qrpheus,2020/01/25,"Dissociation from reality at a young age caused my severe social anxiety for most of my life Bit out there but I was thinking about this since a friend of mine and I were talking about another friends personality and possible things they could diagnose for. And I mentioned my dissociation and he never heard of it before.

I never thought about it but ever since I was 5, I always felt not real and not all there. I don’t know if it was from medication or trauma, but I either felt people weren’t real or I was living in a world where no one was like me and had actual thoughts; like human beings, not animals.

And this brings me to dissociation and social anxiety, from being so self aware I would really push myself about being awkward and thinking about other people’s thoughts of me, and this went on for 20 years. I would get compliments but still think I’m being judged or ridiculed.

Social anxiety so severe I couldn’t go outside, I dropped out of school, and it took me until a few years ago to move on from it. I wouldn’t talk to anyone in person and sit quietly, in fear of being judged, even with family members.

I want to know if anyone else went through this or at least in a way, and how they are now. I still dissociate but I have a grasp of it now, realizing I am so I try not to look too much into it usually.",6.678003246753249,5.949128109848488,7.631709956709957,73.93363636363641,65.25,10.724675324675324,30.97835497835498,10.125756701596842,2.837649134199133,1047,32,206,21,14,355,138,264,0.10099999999999999,0.823,0.076,-0.5647,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,0,20,9,1,2,6,0,22,3,0,2,4,60,42,29,0,8,16,0,2,2,2,3,3,2,0,4,13,17,0,0,12,0,0,7,11,4,0,1,17,5,30,5,38,15,7,37,0,0,1,0,16,13,0,7,16,161,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.10066396271956067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144028653160227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583285096536944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816654218786087,0.2367388502489246,0.0,0.0,0.14425612271550695,0.10569402896507704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777692622642552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261805420247845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596814033372684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823605161656365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469969909195877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08617239185613815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813260885124006,0.0933091981702106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09724493128968016,0.116077549892317,0.0,0.0,0.19808909380291734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939390228030842,0.0,0.053893995974908813,0.0,0.05862510921017414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338208832387095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728611108580721,0.10079220732985454,0.0,0.0910873594674502,0.0,0.0866238437062056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391735892745936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096369640129852,0.07583046497843947,0.0,0.15911829985887369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990019422832569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430287562456237,0.18014115224074154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629125834391905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348249276075135,0.06608344755957539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439791398034416,0.0,0.0,0.1076126951115853,0.2330705644095179,0.0,0.17066102309135456,0.0,0.0,0.3154592262120827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16475871726665905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582344325917675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853130085519063,0.19829181554545225,0.0,0.24567957590331144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460850303717975,0.07003516969796303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361016567775467,0.0,0.060843227527074335,0.08187928208344379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19125060669254604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465560684616953,0.0,0.0,0.13285629911785302
mentalhealth,THONZIN,2020/01/25,"Beginning of mental illness? Hi, i have probably anxiety for about 5 months.
But now i starting have some weird symptoms.

*Like decline in grammer.(about 1 month) 

*Little trouble with speaking. (second day, but really little, Just Occasionally I cram.) 

*messy Thoughts before sleep

*Occasionally dizziness

Any ideas? 
Sry if this is wrong sub, i am just scared af

(i dont have any trouble with communication or expressing myself(except that i've write), no hallucinations and except that dizziness, feeling quite normal...) Just scared if it cant go worst..",4.6971428571428575,8.206583054945058,4.709835164835166,72.87266483516484,86.58241758241758,6.995604395604397,29.57692307692308,7.957251820313856,3.0674043956043966,442,21,63,10,14,137,71,91,0.253,0.7290000000000001,0.018000000000000002,-0.9691,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,2,0,0,7,3,1,0,0,18,12,6,0,3,9,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,7,0,1,1,2,5,1,7,11,2,10,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,4,7,37,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631902642692328,0.0,0.1480365286799884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16466488001141033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12479955010918345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267952024316053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784573165509454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997761016200787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21845205194910547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454043015383654,0.3879007142335309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19501507990331665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3089196538997084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18960115808685526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20863919876285225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20582435790026926,0.0,0.0,0.12396905919293698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3874795311868163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19365224698049507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369691396608482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20113357647031324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15362730513414394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21157553471329707,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arbitmale30,2020/01/25,"I think I need help. I always had negative self esteem and confidence. I constantly doubted my abilities, which have affected my studies, work and any relationships that I pursue. I want to be confident. I can live like this. I have never been to a therapist and don't know how to approach one. Thank I am an south-east Asian living in Canada. I was a student till December. What makes it worse is that I am no longer a student, and am waiting for work permit which will come in a month. 

I am still subscribed to my university health insurance policy till August. I don't know how to approach a therapist?",3.2511755485893445,5.622546844827589,4.798589341692789,79.44170846394984,76.24137931034483,8.700940438871474,27.78683385579937,9.339509955726095,2.8404413793103456,478,20,87,13,11,160,75,116,0.11199999999999999,0.733,0.155,0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,6,0,15,1,0,5,1,18,24,8,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,7,5,0,1,3,0,0,3,5,1,0,1,3,0,16,2,10,19,0,12,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,8,65,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666436970560148,0.0,0.0,0.13619293060788212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17251799188007674,0.0,0.2164246368310167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212881494926634,0.0,0.0,0.1342391872129748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22013029004296614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784357547822843,0.0,0.3536905547469313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368419780841553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598564943266113,0.0,0.0,0.1485003530254398,0.15446336373266095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357105893621247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21501891967425352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20892906575818668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993877320118532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438504349100368,0.0,0.4650662223670891,0.0,0.12832725025750205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812657114258908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916031640683113,0.0,0.20409593063136525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sad_unicorn_,2020/01/25,Help with no support I have no family or friends. No one checks up on me even after my suicide attempt. I just feel so isolated and ostracized from the world. Being alone sucks. What can i do from here?,0.5078333333333305,2.9865154500000024,2.055000000000004,92.20333333333336,94.5,5.666666666666668,21.66666666666667,7.1686216300943375,1.0204166666666663,158,6,32,3,6,51,35,40,0.344,0.499,0.157,-0.8439,0,1,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,7,3,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,1,5,2,6,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,1,1,27,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4018421786568852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25626472445578696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3657638529016675,0.0,0.1961801586637655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997612680367253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600625218504438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629130795862933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4243997240210426,0.4402881527547508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ebony-Memer,2020/01/25,"My anxiety has been getting worse Recently I’ve been feeling even more on edge than usual, and I’ve noticed I’m starting to go into that depressive “trance” more often. I’ve told my mum about it several times, but all she does is book another appointment with my councillor, and then we never talk about it again.  I got diagnosed with an anxiety disorder when I was eight, and it was getting better for while, but now I’m just getting worse. I don’t know who to talk to anymore, and only being a teenager I’m not taken seriously when I ever fess up about how I’m feeling. Everytime I do, it’s the same “oh you’ll be alright!  Come and give me a hug!” If I’m being honest suicide has crossed my mind a few times; though I’ve never thought to act on it, it’s really scary to me. If anyone can give me some sort of advice it’d mean a whole lot to me.",2.533970944309928,3.8834857909604574,4.607380952380954,84.54826271186441,75.27118644067797,7.994995964487491,26.767150928167876,8.634040054169528,1.9240269572235669,663,25,139,13,14,229,110,177,0.14300000000000002,0.75,0.106,-0.8315,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,1,1,0,1,13,6,0,0,6,1,15,2,0,1,4,32,36,15,1,2,6,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,10,0,0,5,1,0,4,4,2,0,1,8,2,16,4,18,23,8,22,0,1,0,1,10,4,0,6,14,95,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14481854964598764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155399790007525,0.2267439750541426,0.0,0.14697379078431352,0.1036243311649716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107015509234274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766049416325045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12764375961803884,0.15041907528562376,0.0,0.0,0.16984913031622187,0.0,0.12969012452648745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788417836042994,0.1340546670729072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986794364461606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23228390649545416,0.28433236635126885,0.08422502444985892,0.0,0.1185284438956558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144640828743054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259936659277187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143238224034645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963895197574306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286007288786049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687257791461578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127121748477695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494020670361963,0.0,0.1463288377831886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742292040393586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048961613169906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621058784833266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238233817403962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560496818647067,0.11765361614994545,0.17283229848839202,0.0,0.0,0.14161069299008908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16322048881233955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16545912184107264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020553053877453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChosenUndead24,2020/01/25,"Why all I can feel is rage and the other emotions are non-existent? What is wrong with me, pls somebody tell me. I am so tired.",-0.008888888888886727,2.035629592592592,1.905185185185185,97.43333333333337,86.40740740740742,5.0814814814814815,20.11111111111111,6.42735559955562,0.0020222222222221475,97,3,23,1,3,32,24,27,0.32899999999999996,0.63,0.040999999999999995,-0.879,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,1,4,6,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4746828060894104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133712074316972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688385238416265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4850163007533077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807810240292671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46138065034779296,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dandingo1999,2020/01/25,"Anyone else experience a daily cycle feeling? Recently before bed, I have found my self repeating some sort of mantra sub-consciously to myself. “Time to start the daily cycle over again tomorrow”. I don’t really have much of a run in with mental health issues and haven’t been diagnosed with anything in the past, but recently I have just had this sudden feeling of distortion and dread. I’m currently 20 years old, in my second year of university studying games design. I don’t know whether it could be brought on through stress or whether or not I’m experiencing some sort of episode as my brain is maturing. A lot of the feelings, I can relate to my friend (who I currently live with) as he has been dealing with multiple mental illnesses for most of his life. He says to me that it could be impending symptoms of BPD or depression. I don’t really know how to explain how I am feeling but it would be great if someone could explain these weird feelings for me.",8.580437158469941,7.516570868852465,8.524699453551914,70.1606010928962,61.622950819672134,12.286338797814205,38.912568306010925,11.429527900616536,4.477574863387979,771,34,138,19,9,251,112,183,0.10099999999999999,0.821,0.078,-0.7506,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,2,6,0,21,6,1,2,0,38,35,14,0,5,10,0,5,0,1,1,5,1,1,1,7,6,0,0,10,1,0,2,5,4,0,1,5,7,16,2,27,23,5,21,0,1,0,0,11,5,0,10,14,98,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807811272535127,0.14372035920689605,0.1154279836125186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935708659102585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17666167334379154,0.15658462443788498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3359759226806011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14460936111161185,0.12081196475541164,0.14236829184856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717527690588544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13720827189428034,0.0,0.0,0.3546166451798992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15379578424299434,0.10837011851768856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546451227798234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490975125827982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14640255172015065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15417440910421698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907489691963194,0.0,0.0,0.1238585391251867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925018796855877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28271276518663924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311255775033676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147186868600854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390094824657506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17971756614615172,0.0,0.27699394699534696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154613591183228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632931820367528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884797380385267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928187153001496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606756448236755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579136547797178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179095325951828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964181992828032,0.0,0.0,0.1806550021707061
mentalhealth,throwaway19216851,2020/01/25,"Confessing extreme wrong-doings I’m just going to start this off by saying I know this is severely screwed up so don’t come at me for disclosing all of this information please. I am trying to sort everything out. Also, this may be very long.

Back in middle school around 7th grade, I kind of went into an emo phase I guess you would say and started hanging out with that group of people and all that because I thought it was cool or edgy. That eventually led to me wanting to be similar to them which somehow ended up to a slight depressive period and I ended up self-harming for attention. I put an emphasis on the “for attention” part because it was strictly for that reason. People say when you self-harm, your body releases endorphins but for me, I didn’t notice a difference at all. It was more due to the fact that a buddy of mine was doing it so I decided to do it to. Mostly, it was more of a “I have that too” or “I have more than you” kind of thing.

Anyways, I ended up getting institutionalized voluntarily for an observation period by my father because he was a drunken arsehole who liked to start fights and called the cops on me. 
I was diagnosed with Major Depression during that time period and honestly, it went away shortly after that when I got out of that toxic environment and got out of that peer group. But here is where things get a little screwed up. I did outpatient services after I was released and I never told them that I was no longer dealing with it. I liked the attention I got from that. I for one reason or another, decided to continue on and list off symptoms to the psychiatrist that I was “having” and faked having a form of Psychosis which eventually led to a diagnosis of Schizoaffective Disorder, Bipolar Type. I sat there and told every Psychiatrist, therapist, and Nurse practitioner what symptoms I had and what they wanted to hear to purposely twist everything to make it sound like I was suffering from Schizoaffective Disorder even though I wasn’t. Eventually, I grew the hell up and got over the bs and just told my family that I no longer had symptoms and everyone was just like okay cool. My mother was surprised because usually a disorder like that doesn’t just “go away”. I still haven’t told my family the truth of what actually happened and I’m wanting to do that. They think that it can come back or I can relapse or something but they don’t know that it never happened to begin with. This lie has been carried on for the past almost decade and they still don’t know the truth.

How do I go about relaying this type of thing to my family without them thinking I’m a Psychopath? This isn’t something you can just bring up and have a laugh about it saying like “haha got you”. I’m trying to clean up the damn mess that I made and it’s starting to seem like I made a HUGE mess and dug myself a deep hole.

Re-analyzing this situation makes me realize that this entire thing sounds like a huge scenario involving a severe case of Munchausen Syndrome (Not self-diagnosing, just pointing it out) and it is sad.

What do I do?",5.374881756756756,6.424644292229733,6.247540540540545,76.63124324324329,68.07094594594595,9.83891891891892,30.678378378378376,10.008157457239328,3.0415025675675684,2439,94,455,58,40,806,258,592,0.102,0.7879999999999999,0.11,0.3312,0,0,2,0,1,0,46.0,0,6,7,0,27,31,5,0,29,4,48,8,1,9,8,92,95,36,0,4,16,2,0,8,0,2,5,7,1,0,55,34,0,0,17,0,0,13,14,12,0,1,34,9,59,19,83,57,10,75,2,4,0,2,34,35,4,12,35,342,114,5,0.0,0.0,0.0652200611932035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692430759641928,0.0,0.0,0.05344689465172945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008097346816136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05949617248356116,0.0,0.0,0.1255849432931862,0.10278199693464146,0.0,0.1629648399297091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423718649407696,0.0,0.0,0.0682446915300782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514264857055342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890262152619213,0.11512755494373553,0.1356696199356088,0.0,0.06982700331024927,0.22979166950042276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775844923188962,0.0,0.0,0.04414303588375434,0.0,0.0563102841491708,0.0638624750893538,0.1201316602188308,0.0,0.1890146244424389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983571122114786,0.0,0.11394941467179558,0.0,0.26726512086894305,0.0,0.07362486771913819,0.0,0.11820166007749387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07532644978014418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919405100600224,0.11019017936881503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26121260289204945,0.06698493640746475,0.0,0.059145731224026235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647934690303966,0.08922404231548657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309255639642814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609062310292798,0.0,0.0,0.04528825233801713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237439626623733,0.06380033967449121,0.09266816030991312,0.0,0.0,0.07336334504415001,0.06317945959115404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671863392898604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743237238010825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21259539842680375,0.0,0.06763928375450066,0.0,0.06084290052255827,0.20916640982719828,0.1510061402556871,0.0,0.0,0.07512389154327985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029037120694412,0.0,0.0,0.18922097894243026,0.0,0.10674697609691036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083974481339884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759908984054302,0.1776053918273516,0.0856486869421497,0.06566378186105921,0.053058501246612384,0.038971274427783434,0.0,0.0,0.2554499003574152,0.0,0.09075140556710792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360789062433094,0.055144811082367295,0.11826076329508653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12391103960882882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644253125717246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04747675084049585,0.07307217139906194,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Canadagirl112,2020/01/25,Being fake? Does anybody who is on anti depressants and feels good and happy and normal and happy on them ever feel like they are living a lie? Like that there happiness is fake because you are on a drug. The same way somebody who is super sociable and confident on cocaine isn’t being their true selves it is how the drug makes them act. I keep feeling like my feelings are a lie but at the same time am afraid of what I would be like would I stop taking my medication. Also I find myself not as sad at things which I feel should sadden me more and make me cry ? Sorry just wanted to know does anybody feel the same,5.925288018433179,5.621586943548388,6.25889400921659,81.74048387096776,66.66129032258064,8.698617511520737,27.39170506912443,7.957251820313856,1.5642479262672817,487,12,97,5,7,157,81,124,0.14400000000000002,0.642,0.214,0.7287,0,0,3,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,4,1,5,15,0,1,7,0,15,3,0,3,2,32,27,10,0,5,3,0,6,4,0,3,3,0,0,0,7,6,0,2,8,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,0,6,15,10,9,21,4,11,0,2,0,0,7,6,0,0,7,70,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203919325702948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540463068042223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15389502118091036,0.0,0.0,0.12066929670658685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24520769622002395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3249467369975656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267299117820508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42503744983477787,0.200177211980314,0.0,0.0,0.12805031779305365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11751056908325087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4474222525903847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452873308467186,0.0,0.0,0.07699617150678824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273786246023248,0.0,0.1237122733464366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18703780238866888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113761545220346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372698146967177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683226301028608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713120503213115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533896203271713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307727300201156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169436551064191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263554942328331,0.11120612328362336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19904830382739666,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crazyckava,2020/01/25,"Help needed: any useful alternative PTSD treatments? After almost a decade of therapy and meds, I’m officially “treatment resistant.” I don’t think I can keep going with how I feel but I don’t want to give up. So I’m looking for alternative treatments to typical psych drugs. 

I (21F) have depression (dysthymia, cyclical depression), anxiety (GAD, panic), OCD (with dermatillomania), and PTSD. 

I’m currently on Pristiq and Abilify but they don’t work. 

Some things I’ve tried: 

1. Dozens of prescribed meds: Zoloft, Prozac, Xanax (got addicted), Cymbalta, Buspar, hydroxyzine, bupropion, Trintellix, Wellbutrin, etc.

2. Therapy: talk, exposure, acceptance, etc.

3. Supplements: NAC, l-theanine, caffeine, vitamin B, vitamin D

4. Illegal drugs: mescaline, LSD, LSA

5. Legal drugs: Siberian motherwort, dagga, CBD (not in a legal marijuana state), kava kava (tried today, helped but worried about liver + interactions with other meds)

I can’t afford ketamine therapy. I’d consider microdosing LSD but I don’t have access to it currently. Anyone got any other ideas? I’m kind of at the end of my rope here.",4.4868742655699165,7.854138810810816,5.980470035252644,66.51195064629849,79.81081081081079,9.92009400705053,32.908343125734426,9.761364909221204,4.816193889541715,860,46,120,31,23,289,129,185,0.081,0.8170000000000001,0.102,-0.2047,3,0,3,0,0,0,68.0,0,0,1,1,4,5,0,1,3,0,8,10,1,2,0,22,23,9,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,9,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,6,3,0,1,2,2,9,2,17,21,3,11,0,2,1,0,6,4,0,2,5,56,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12775267922098865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734727825203348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593842930159361,0.0,0.08964882318008881,0.0,0.0,0.08194087044249143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20186843479844446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40770409901821175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379415980941524,0.0,0.26139213901398994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05925398801424176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241781409766034,0.06660088165465995,0.0,0.1874525751976507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709786002457612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229146585061946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416245524477216,0.0,0.1220337095822492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984087610389907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3905097606404517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689373109872281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749536526168268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27397399168499165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419161575016746,0.0,0.0,0.4020455258608192,0.0,0.07785478132814021,0.07508960988532885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108092294748392,0.0,0.0,0.15912649414420452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121317182409588,0.0,0.0,0.06912076839790318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531456797866271,0.11901053247446575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonpowerlifter94,2020/01/25,"Don't know what's going on with me I'm in an interesting spot right now. When I was 19, I was diagnosed with severe clinical depression and general anxiety disorder. I took antidepressants for a while. Tried to OD at one point. Had never had a job, was living at home, a virgin, never had a girlfriend, addicted to video games.

Fast forward to age 25: Working steady job, bought a new car a few months ago, looking to buy a house, have been off antidepressants for several years, accomplished/elite power lifter, gained a bunch of muscle, body count is nearing 50, have been in 3 longish term relationships, have 0 problem meeting women and have several fwb. I grew a nice beard too.

Yet, I don't feel like anything has improved. I'm laying in bed listening to depressing pop punk from the early 2000s trying to figure out why I'm randomly sad and in a weird funk and mood right now. 

Maybe I'll wake up and feel normal again. I haven't felt like this in years, and thought it was behind me.

I just needed to type this all out to cope with my thoughts.",5.533212669683259,6.1790096666666665,5.974117647058827,80.18083710407244,67.52941176470588,9.610256410256412,29.90799396681749,9.661875296680813,2.608263650075416,828,29,162,17,13,267,138,204,0.125,0.802,0.073,-0.8085,3,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,3,7,10,0,0,12,0,18,6,2,0,3,27,33,8,1,3,1,0,3,2,1,0,3,1,2,1,4,11,0,0,7,2,2,5,5,5,0,1,14,5,10,4,29,19,4,38,0,3,1,1,6,17,0,1,20,93,14,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477050777395162,0.0,0.0,0.12010450578969288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365016591288584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149746426377967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504998431478725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23339622336593646,0.1375204091407052,0.0,0.0,0.15528430718595296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370165378822371,0.09679472441471826,0.1300925096363574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700259957214023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590841768141482,0.0,0.0,0.15633830463080464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689076188283091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446225400242742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13238801744809356,0.0,0.11964094500890787,0.0,0.11377822984338275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611881798990155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814754191403997,0.0,0.0,0.1004647838720618,0.20899786616527466,0.13085795333032585,0.0,0.0,0.1327523123394776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918121388376788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808269288861948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964649068759768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454665181151284,0.0,0.2314169727131348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4591984454716595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21512927664394907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15053537274098247,0.183978851412808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225946094541468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863898724036556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17450339179637894
mentalhealth,Hay2Day,2020/01/25,"What’s wrong with me? I lost a friend tonight, because of how much a horrible person I am. My brain just completely shuts down and I go kinda crazy, I get jealous over who they’re hanging out with and start to get aggressive. I get delusional and it’s almost like I’m a prisoner to my mind. Trust me, I’ve tried to help myself, but it isn’t working. Is there like- any kind of medication I can take to decrease my anger and jealousy? Therapy ain’t gonna help me. I’m sorry I’m ranting, but I’m kinda freaked out. It’s like something takes complete control over my body, something that ain’t me. Someone please help me.",0.6741043307086619,3.1114059133858305,2.371766732283465,92.19576033464571,88.29133858267716,5.379724409448818,24.47293307086614,6.9077264865688965,1.0370318897637794,489,21,102,7,16,160,79,127,0.187,0.637,0.175,0.281,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,3,12,3,0,3,0,6,3,2,2,0,17,19,7,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,1,6,8,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,6,0,0,1,0,16,6,13,17,1,10,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,3,5,54,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471900609843898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118629367649284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027524910713127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18271799909519088,0.0,0.18363196428772344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449419018696403,0.0,0.1844962776963322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127089219678722,0.0,0.2578271488117842,0.0,0.09348688094728128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307746513028918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17129729510829372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410933441491447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17956684127989345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657124377812043,0.0,0.0,0.16609409115411264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092350440152465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363158278188434,0.0,0.1805672365353809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937694687178415,0.25327415082326826,0.0,0.1841398307808222,0.11643113206463115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24736107572534105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18811553880236892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168200212989697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975506422041375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17985057864016296,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cherrybomb1024,2020/01/25,"Not sure where to start I’m a 28 year old woman, and I’ve been struggling with my mental health since I was 10. For a long time, I just told myself I was a naturally sad person or just a mega introvert, but I know it’s more than that.

I’m not looking for a diagnosis, so I won’t go into too much detail, but my issues have included long periods of depression, trouble focusing in college, procrastination on basic tasks because the idea of them stress me out, crippling anxiety, and issues with romantic relationships that stem from fear of abandonment and issues with rejection. 

Anyways, after struggling with alcoholism for a long time, I’ve recently gotten sober, and now I’m ready to take the next step with my mental health. After being against any type of therapy or medication, I think maybe I’m ready to open that door, but have no idea where to begin, and what type of doctor I should see. 

I know this is very vague, but any type of help would be appreciated.",11.328778801843322,7.3954027688172115,10.95027649769585,63.88112903225807,58.946236559139784,14.499539170506914,41.08755760368663,12.28987398476788,4.809033179723503,769,27,143,18,7,255,117,186,0.204,0.7090000000000001,0.08800000000000001,-0.9717,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,0,8,10,0,4,8,0,11,5,0,0,1,32,26,12,0,2,10,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,2,6,13,1,1,5,0,0,2,4,9,0,0,5,2,14,1,27,16,2,24,0,4,2,0,6,7,0,2,15,90,20,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13522565636079376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720940167950264,0.0,0.09679765672057772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713354799647319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898297803132853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951223243397816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238518285817275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191181156661794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689980412326497,0.0,0.0,0.08481262880410978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28568147230993257,0.0,0.39620378933866096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907882612798325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3359340652957552,0.10625613512197526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711974458459832,0.0,0.0,0.1274690253778695,0.2550316861404367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301656205004044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13456963974001138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277545232959534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048402953833203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493640551795038,0.13584945051299105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083068752570633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466968419891552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956094742578159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14494351040014675,0.2645602350208349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925617297311325,0.0,0.09513732240413318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470189872670214,0.0,0.0,0.08107745336891953,0.0,0.0,0.14756521310269002,0.0,0.0,0.12090802628598732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044032549404614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988565242052267,0.0,0.0,0.08148332068218331
mentalhealth,makingslugs,2020/01/25,"What’s my problem? Hi, I’ll answer questions as they come along but a bit of basic background information on me. (Don’t know if this is an appropriate subreddit to post in)
21 y/o father of 1 and 1 on the way. Completely unmotivated pos, don’t do anything other then play pc, eat, and get further in debt by paying for countless hookers. Pathological liar, nowadays I don’t know what I’ve lied about or who to. Tough guy facade, but never been in a fight. Still with the mother of my children. Don’t do drugs regularly unless going out. if I had more money Id drink myself stupid every night. Supposed smart guy, but dumb as a box of nails. Terrible anxiety when under pressure. Slow to anger but nuclear when I do. Would do anything for anyone, given homeless people the shirt of my back, not in front of anyone.(not showing off) plus a lot more shit. Big unorganised block of mess just like my head and house. Ask me anything, call me names, or tell me what the fuck is wrong with me",3.4656541450777216,5.296234046632126,4.705048575129535,82.81436042746115,73.81865284974093,7.104792746113992,26.052137305699482,7.865858978985527,1.5346479274611395,773,27,149,11,16,255,133,193,0.273,0.6709999999999999,0.055,-0.9946,2,0,2,0,1,0,31.0,0,0,1,0,6,16,7,1,9,0,13,8,3,0,1,31,21,18,0,4,11,2,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,3,6,9,2,1,5,3,3,3,6,13,0,0,3,0,14,3,30,17,4,24,0,0,0,1,15,11,3,6,9,94,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265759655908193,0.0,0.0,0.11569303901263216,0.0,0.4084768917391937,0.0,0.15468217609382828,0.0,0.0,0.12722804275781666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18063877904259645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895251680124565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252859695748166,0.1734810020285429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16208719210167086,0.191880339967946,0.16930624305284372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394066558950244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15296452189945595,0.08644569203025602,0.0,0.09403437329795092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276615806652691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16980904921692075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909178986178122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18186428583910952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083509077655715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14066763996106227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276124668171017,0.0,0.0,0.15527241073882264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470869426379238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584643397953012,0.0,0.0,0.15832227184311454,0.0,0.0,0.18535236217518813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698416661575921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321360670561943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461878278027368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133394684519528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753758957958088,0.1809038474525488,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayguilteating,2020/01/25,"I literally CANNOT live with myself. Please help me I need real help, badly.  I'm waiting to hear back from a new therapist who was recommended to me by a family member's therapist.  I haven't heard back from him and it's over the 48 hour interval, I'm scared he won't answer me; I didn't even tell him what I need to talk about.

​

If you read my profile, you'll see my situation.

Basically, I made a horrible, massive mistake as a child.  I hit my childhood dog, I just can't live with myself anymore.  I don't know what to do, I am terrified of myself.  

I am not mean spirited, I am not violent or dark.  (Listen, I know you'll judge me, I judge me too.  Please trust that, that isn't who I am) I want to understand why I thought it was okay, I want to understand why I didn't understand that it was a terrible thing to do.  I think so poorly of people who abuse animals, which is making it really difficult to forgive myself.  

If you don't want to read my long novel on my page, explaining in detail what happened - here's a summary.  For a few weeks period (Memory is unbelievably blurry, it could have been five days it could have been a month.  I don't remember how long this happened) I was the first to get home during the day and my baby girl, my baby dog was making massive messes of diarrhea and pee.  We had to crate her because our carpet was getting obliterated and we couldn't lose our security deposit.  I was 11ish, I don't remember exactly.  My older sister was always late to get me from school so that delayed me getting home by hours.  She was doing random drugs, which I found out years later.  My mom would be at work, and I would get home and basically just let out anger.  I am trans, this was well before I came out.  I didn't even know what transgenderism was, I knew I wanted to be a boy but didn't think I would ever be.  Anyway, I think I was so disassociated and angry, and basically I pretended all day to be a class clown.  I let out all this pent up anger on my dog for just doing her nature.  Everybody shits and pisses. 

I would literally give my life, I'd give every penny, I'd give my heart and soul, to be able to clean up her diarrhea again.  I would kill myself, seriously, I would have already - but my mom really loves me.  I don't know why.

My father beat me as a child and I know that may have something to do with it, but I didn't like being hit.  I knew it was wrong, why would I repeat it?  What the fuck man.  I just hate myself",2.3540466779597224,3.9147887826086993,4.523195934500283,84.09164690382083,76.19367588932806,7.981102955015999,22.71955580651233,8.704169506293173,1.43586388104649,1908,54,405,40,42,661,225,506,0.15,0.79,0.061,-0.992,0,0,2,0,1,1,72.0,4,4,0,4,19,24,8,1,15,1,68,8,4,4,4,84,117,23,1,19,12,4,0,1,0,11,2,3,5,5,28,21,0,3,21,4,2,1,18,17,1,2,28,4,88,7,44,65,4,35,2,1,1,2,40,11,3,5,24,283,116,5,0.07185678679238458,0.08513854224024542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929575105759287,0.0,0.05979060293843639,0.07785679846810027,0.0873138610699995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126262400344792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105068671772002,0.059997415511651664,0.04380323027805568,0.0,0.06114483305789425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218502122406374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474359442752427,0.0,0.0,0.1390250487523063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333105965921607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492145995774702,0.06499857753239344,0.06054244203038577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774018349760602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06112134613754577,0.0,0.07878725780872793,0.0,0.06643044150472317,0.18771102659758845,0.20679473265784132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127085438499646,0.0,0.0,0.07094370040096072,0.0,0.0,0.08098782110720887,0.0851506383259149,0.09632817902175443,0.0,0.2162346479911175,0.0,0.14152892108611834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949888811708472,0.0,0.19745305401886445,0.0,0.08105758536313748,0.0,0.0,0.14695686588293608,0.05075457356911103,0.03510559640026022,0.0,0.12690171843007472,0.12718199022009788,0.0,0.0803893641664561,0.0,0.0,0.06485355555639168,0.06799262908737329,0.0959299263220212,0.0,0.0,0.07827310635579335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16831560045448826,0.05735540166394696,0.0,0.0,0.10656179382502756,0.0,0.06939973245206506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04981644834860975,0.0,0.0,0.15775434741989475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375246451879034,0.08178875482239713,0.09206659523477123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627994635846855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194117909698555,0.0727229044846504,0.057260555743982325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375995903260997,0.0,0.08077003903598634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531886507775147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057755763337011864,0.0628059988726275,0.0,0.0,0.16686253565463333,0.04773845622278628,0.13812878258003197,0.0,0.057046262232180275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244163476496996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16953197838119075,0.0,0.05763918003028789,0.0,0.06460788097952591,0.0,0.25935829388764137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052312596595056216,0.0,0.0,0.3573149976576492,0.07856411609010262,0.0873138610699995,0.04627341477699858
mentalhealth,beanutputterandjam,2020/01/25,"Random Uncontrollable Outbursts Over the last year I’ve started to almost uncontrollably say “kill myself”, with no real desire or urge to do so. My life is fine, and I would do nothing different to change it.

When I’m around other people I’ve even started saying it, muffled pursing my lips. I don’t know if anyone has really understood what I am saying, although these outbursts seem to have only begun to progress in intensity, as well as my diminishing ability to restrain them.

No thoughts of self harm have accompanied these outbursts, but I’m concerned that might manifest itself later. Whenever I murmer those words to myself I am overcome with confusion and frustration.

Curious if anyone has experienced this, and any next steps I should take aside from expressing my concerns anonymously.

20 yrs old, in college in the U.S.",8.396258503401363,9.427044680272113,8.199047619047622,65.37095238095239,61.38095238095239,11.159183673469386,38.102040816326536,10.980518767755715,4.6926,676,32,100,17,9,217,105,147,0.122,0.804,0.07400000000000001,-0.8004,1,0,0,1,0,1,17.0,0,0,1,1,5,8,2,3,2,0,13,2,1,0,0,24,22,12,1,5,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,1,10,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,6,1,0,2,4,13,2,18,17,0,15,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,8,9,70,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18553544898486346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599966870273066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591101628297839,0.0,0.0,0.16494229781480788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196006207629969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935826439708703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237852398319775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20498961120920225,0.0,0.10182739843048988,0.15103142331808925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13087177128437116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19655734807704872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19705194103154064,0.0,0.0,0.17778527034328578,0.0,0.19442469083989347,0.0,0.0,0.1409170493520967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845279500972334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210894082287484,0.11869785860863445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44203650492467017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686758559247046,0.19329192014889354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26229034372047483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393107247704395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14709502727497584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665928255944656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162064128707085,0.0,0.0,0.1193170059245218
mentalhealth,thrwawyngrbg,2020/01/25,"Does this sound like one of the bipolar disorders? I know no one here can diagnose me, but that’s not what I’m really looking for. I’m looking for some guidance. I’m a 30-year-old female. I’ve dealt with eating disorders since I was 10, and depression/anxiety since I was 14. I also grew up in a very volatile home with an NPD/PTSD father. 

Up until I was probably in my mid-20s, though, I only had what were depressive episodes but no periods of mania. Once the episode went away, I felt neutral. Something shifted at 25-26. I started experiencing depressive episodes, but some months I felt “high,” like a bubbling energy. That’s also the time I had an abortion. Not sure if that triggered  anything for me. I also went through a breakup. 

I had what felt like a month long depressive episode this time; no energy, not talking much, no motivation; eating disorder kicked in. Three days ago, it’s like I suddenly shifted. I need less sleep and feel rested. I did some heavy work outs and I felt great - so great I was still able to go for a jog, visit family, and clean the entire house. I also talk A LOT MORE, and I’m able to eat more without guilt. My thoughts feel all over the place, but this is when I’m best at my job/life/relationship. And there’s a sense of euphoria. Honestly, I love having these states. I have these manic-like episodes less than once a month, though. Not sure how often the mania has to be for it to be bipolar. 

I’m already in therapy for “depression,” but what worries me is that there’s more to it. I’m not on any kind of meds, btw. 

Any insight is much appreciated.",2.8071428571428565,4.818084859872614,4.003316651501367,86.33466560509554,76.19745222929936,7.543039126478617,27.13785259326661,8.418075326091056,1.909550864422203,1242,50,253,24,28,405,164,314,0.111,0.7020000000000001,0.188,0.9849,1,0,1,0,0,0,56.0,0,0,0,3,14,17,0,1,17,0,18,8,1,3,3,42,41,22,0,2,12,1,6,4,0,0,3,1,2,0,16,9,3,0,10,1,0,6,10,5,0,3,16,10,26,12,33,23,14,35,0,4,2,1,5,14,0,6,18,162,42,2,0.16754460788579273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742590929137913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244482053128657,0.2679707247881377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139360787117528,0.0,0.06408558322143659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893746828211576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870683716996672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791386464763543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05402620573337635,0.0,0.2886118505330288,0.08502712510889504,0.0,0.0,0.28803095403182577,0.0,0.07330970771202278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571599421365684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897307261323902,0.0,0.08471558789925289,0.0,0.3217381961469627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047609730864249945,0.0,0.0,0.184718521678512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851003853431473,0.08403045123088675,0.0,0.0,0.09666199126527557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313108538477276,0.0,0.0,0.0872359633270772,0.04603906741199977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059170855716224074,0.16370766481592372,0.0,0.0,0.07413585282879405,0.14069527343630342,0.0,0.0,0.07122021708631221,0.07560777499757815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930521445664862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20059876131846252,0.0,0.12316456472571954,0.062116101898648676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790494096974649,0.17842953933390066,0.1135325623919464,0.06371261207316369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752422759432342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032071242682467,0.0,0.09792534035481534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05366668301825776,0.0,0.0,0.08994010352510898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859463100133304,0.0,0.08383280329893564,0.0,0.0,0.0644920123197132,0.0,0.0,0.05929446790446415,0.0,0.06690067014189352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579088101233712,0.0,0.0,0.13466600934165113,0.0,0.0,0.09580093038738403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16461172657735346,0.06650585187350523,0.09769660821625133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691209240982943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15531553006772794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075351157931457,0.0,0.06098723499375312,0.08507484105841334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053946617156352766
mentalhealth,throwawaycid93,2020/01/25,"I need to turn my life around and I dont know where to start. The last 24 hours have completely changed my life. I \[24M\] just moved out/was kicked out of my home by my Fiancee. Im not sure how to view it. I havent being doing well lately. For a long time I have had anger issues. I never get physical, but I yell and scream alot at my Fiancee, and Im ashamed to admit my daughter as well. I honestly didnt see how bad it was, but im starting too. She sat me down and told me that im not happy, and that she isnt happy. She is right, I just dont want to admit it. I was happy when I was with her, but only when I was with her. Nearly everything else would upset me. 

I lost my job about 6 months ago when my company went under. I went from being able to provide for 6 people to not having any money. This coincided with a bunch of drama from my meth addicted parent. I wont go into it. I was a wreck. Drank too much, and some day I couldnt even get out of bed. She got a job and started providing. Started to help me quit drinking and start working on myself. But it wasnt enough.

​

She told me I needed to leave to focus on myself. That I bring down the entire family with my anger, and I know she is right. She said she wont force me to leave, but she may as well have. She didnt want to be with me any longer while I was this way, and she didnt want me to be at home to try to improve myself. She didnt want to do this. I know she didnt. She was in tears, we have been together for nearly 10 years. When she was driving me to my brothers, she said she thinks she made a mistake. I didnt say anything. I was so hurt. I asked her to make a promise, that she wouldnt be with anyone else while I try to improve myself. She wouldnt, and I understand why. It just hurt so much to hear the love of my life say that. She is truly, the only thing I really care about. Not anything else. And it seems like that is the problem. She said she doesnt want us to end, she asked if she could keep the engagement ring I gave her. I said yes. We promised each other that whatever happens between here and then, we wont give up on eachother. I need to believe her. I need to do this for her, and for myself, because I know she is right, as much as I hate it. I just want to go home.

​

I dont even know where to start. I have no job still, which I am going to try to get as soon as I can. I dont want to mooch off of my younger brother. I dont have insurance, and even once I get that, I need to see a therapist. I dont even know where to start. The best im going to get is Medicaid \[I live in Iowa\], so I dont know what my options are.",0.16252386168048716,1.7602283786574873,2.320179627601316,97.24302957283683,82.76936316695354,5.395850414645596,18.481020184634644,6.305155272017332,-0.3354381411359726,2012,46,501,17,55,679,220,581,0.14300000000000002,0.752,0.106,-0.9185,4,0,2,0,0,0,90.0,4,0,0,4,31,28,3,2,15,1,61,7,0,4,2,85,129,39,0,20,14,4,0,1,2,7,4,10,4,0,24,29,2,1,12,2,1,9,29,13,3,0,32,13,110,15,77,83,9,61,0,3,3,1,59,24,0,6,28,353,134,4,0.05258710049491596,0.0,0.0,0.05732770168702561,0.0,0.0,0.0466152916646622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395620283116585,0.12779816609260944,0.07152206325011391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036770123377033705,0.05388169891306646,0.08654940599193371,0.04681366855321799,0.09832368045197773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04390803234859972,0.03205660836588068,0.0,0.0,0.05924765427717104,0.05518691760313788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05361605370109318,0.0,0.05563017952293151,0.0,0.055136574357463816,0.0,0.0,0.041986520693878204,0.0,0.0,0.033914329396941244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4314218309222742,0.05151533836676768,0.0,0.0,0.1317893239024517,0.0,0.046576562360126535,0.05433653222929269,0.0,0.13893313566454105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0472618950890161,0.0,0.04957443821451512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737294778031153,0.05044633858324102,0.11954584432586884,0.0,0.042058708188838285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04650259929608778,0.1679398389899951,0.0,0.051918874597686786,0.0,0.0,0.05926948417181981,0.0,0.035248024973238236,0.0,0.15824744845947933,0.0,0.05178770112276651,0.0,0.11259115742417948,0.0,0.28401546263130417,0.054887270359057744,0.15655374875545075,0.04674183115119675,0.0,0.0,0.2023034661236196,0.042865505610162793,0.05932053989113649,0.11136429289244568,0.0,0.0,0.11143147279464684,0.025691401024768547,0.0,0.046435373177353925,0.04653792911845397,0.0,0.0,0.05740503222542909,0.0,0.04746191133414313,0.04975918599118577,0.03510229792588395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0419745219048384,0.05589176552861164,0.11597270883928963,0.19496334344124647,0.0405584137935914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0560035457697893,0.0,0.07998971918377479,0.0,0.0,0.058391751835837113,0.0,0.0,0.036457274149722614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05031875313058338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05593285445049053,0.0,0.0,0.0336886431467095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472728947486814,0.2000894995820296,0.08363874601043926,0.0,0.0,0.0838102212391902,0.047873321257202534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605499427623565,0.0,0.04199612638476685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495627198736873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06105767682501397,0.03493653288607479,0.03369569062308976,0.0,0.0,0.03066396119284536,0.0,0.0,0.10049845618715014,0.0,0.10710956798433774,0.057199664572423474,0.0,0.054745026198914616,0.0632558070164785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21712064049685928,0.04174119264481707,0.0,0.0,0.14184635640543164,0.09749753801280453,0.04745167879641677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038284035469642916,0.0,0.0,0.03735636739396609,0.0,0.12779816609260944,0.03386436858291088
mentalhealth,CoPHar28,2020/01/25,"SAD Self diagnosed with Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD). I would be more detailed, but I don’t like to talk about it

You’re not alone. I just wanted to share something with a little humor. 
My goal was to give a little laughter and smiles, to the people that needed it. I hope it worked.",1.90845238095238,4.33853960714286,3.2214285714285715,88.59023809523809,81.5,5.8761904761904775,20.047619047619047,7.1686216300943375,0.6008904761904761,222,6,43,3,6,72,44,56,0.086,0.581,0.33399999999999996,0.9533,0,1,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,10,8,2,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,5,4,7,5,1,2,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,28,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593771881760752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915836077230811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541882676856869,0.0,0.0,0.2870224811648421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402419756688554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487404333795395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235086060223463,0.5020073013996966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18569585078624912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17362147214664592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26126039318772704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255288967500242,0.0,0.1927986259692664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20129176181635844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14771422210038548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18232110746009755,0.0,0.0,0.17790324845338729,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Espeon3244,2020/01/25,"I’m worried about myself but not sure what to do Ever since probably around 6th grade I have been struggling with depression and high amounts of anxiety mostly due to bullying by many people 

About 2 or 3 years ago I worked on myself a lot and discovered that I had been doing better. In that same time frame I also got into a relationship and for a bit was rather happy. However things turned bad and the relationship ended up being an abusive one where I got manipulated for about 2 years and it lead to my mental state becoming worse then ever. 

Now that i’m out of it i’ve discovered that my mental state just keeps deteriorating. My trust issues with people have gotten worse and i’ve realized I have cut a lot of people out of my life out of the fear of of them just using me for whatever purpose. Because of this i’ve become incredibly lonely but can’t bring myself to do anything about it. 

I’ve also realized many things about myself such that I can’t seem to pinpoint a personality for myself as I only ever mimic what others do. I know everyone does slight mimicking of the people they spend time around but I do it in a way where I will lie about interest and act different just to fit in. Thoughts of self harm come back at night as well. 

I’m really not sure what to do with everything and I don’t know where to even start anymore. I also can’t bring myself to tell any of my closest friends or family in fear of what they would end up thinking of me

For anyone who actually reads this i’m sorry for the multiple errors i’m sure are here as well as the long story and how confusing it probably is. 

Thank you to anyone who reads this",4.512549407114623,5.567367590909091,5.9177733860342565,78.19013833992095,70.06060606060606,9.133069828722004,26.16600790513834,9.43228470229965,2.1816837944664025,1315,39,254,28,23,445,167,330,0.19899999999999998,0.7120000000000001,0.08900000000000001,-0.991,2,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,3,3,29,20,1,4,12,0,22,1,0,4,6,54,43,23,0,2,11,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,22,19,0,1,7,2,1,5,6,9,2,1,8,0,30,11,57,32,6,45,0,2,0,0,12,20,0,7,17,186,52,5,0.0,0.1059858088581552,0.08729209697734938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929366323269334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21460382399471564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06083032192375129,0.0,0.06843041645998332,0.0,0.08871219365075944,0.12509361953830106,0.0,0.07361124650987179,0.15926221359502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878294714693793,0.07468855403299772,0.054529014350744004,0.19758506949630456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911288753142774,0.09765824673751768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770548437195963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704474288319854,0.0,0.0,0.09345813900020017,0.0,0.0,0.07827991222236882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845556762310894,0.0,0.0,0.059082099874522176,0.24274294461000775,0.0,0.08547507111652881,0.08039355025141366,0.0,0.08432723830218279,0.20131638907007396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911027342631698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430856237956795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522315217948348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09451078531756796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336448569112378,0.0,0.07950890975529559,0.0,0.0,0.09832078910935337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06318248341384182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916206779551388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15209751930467064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18138026128538495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18029284059488832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394449674554874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060614885093619474,0.06803215885318765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480585846898426,0.07810590059333447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19288843623295815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789521035535801,0.0,0.05730514234809784,0.0,0.0,0.19207560987346986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143359996343948,0.0933177828876498,0.0,0.0,0.07399549041918146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013401676483036,0.06331447618188095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351449030159306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529219154198522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818485513736254,0.08235524049170803,0.0,0.0,0.11885566191947175,0.05731713026448279,0.0,0.07101477293269931,0.10432018015449124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729792043899324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725767336895754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100271079110677,0.0,0.0,0.1608559024866559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512200840780366,0.09084269052804306,0.1823181439479948,0.06354402407352991,0.0,0.0,0.11520811056242886
mentalhealth,kremit_da_frong,2020/01/25,"Is there something wrong with me (16m)? I always get these thoughts about hurting people for no reason but sometimes they feel more like an urge to do it and I have to control myself not to do it. Sometimes it's about strangers but there are also times where it's about people I love and don't want to hurt. It's even about me when I'm alone, it just never stops. It just feels like my brain is telling me to hit them or attack them with whatever object I have near me. It's really disturbing and I hate myself mostly because of this. I've never wanted to hurt anyone and I swoe to myself I'll kill myself if I ever lose control and act on these thouhts. Anyone has an idea on what it could be and how to stop it?",2.466799999999999,3.862055346666669,3.5236666666666667,92.06350000000002,75.53333333333333,5.8000000000000025,21.166666666666664,5.985473137389443,0.0664666666666669,562,13,122,3,12,181,89,150,0.21,0.664,0.126,-0.9313,0,1,1,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,3,3,14,12,3,1,2,0,11,2,1,4,3,32,21,13,1,4,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,14,8,0,4,5,0,0,1,5,9,0,0,1,2,19,3,19,17,2,12,0,4,0,1,5,4,0,3,9,91,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399557961919218,0.0,0.11118411618949084,0.1156860488179558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19442929679090296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15816936397490106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475282715494606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520607795023506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118731945033113,0.1110060144414178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182955272963443,0.1257627159447206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14059786232990046,0.1986494703174879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263866199508544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372656568852892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4465110030715184,0.15695059460483582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538186905583793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584836209548232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554163113191505,0.0,0.0,0.12548211968760153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144606313115556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927750446513612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906768043298859,0.1429484066237783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703389180617663,0.27501308881240993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23247453201186724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152039776418537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037615198945344,0.08107087852841226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16400975875260138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520100437638578,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notclockworkclown,2020/01/25,"35/F stuck and spiralling down What makes this worse is that I keep telling myself that there are a million other people who are probably struggling through much greater problems, and doing so with a smile. I’ve never really been a ray of sunshine, but things have been all dark & gloomy in my head for nearly a year now; mostly since my dog died in my arms. I feel it affected me a lot more than I thought it would — because he was “just a dog” right? But no. He was more than that.. he was the only person who hadn’t judged me and I could be completely myself with. So, well shit happens. He died of cancer last year. Leaving me in a real mess. I’m ridden with guilt .. because i have abused this dog: I have hit him and taken out my anger on him, and he had no choice but stay, and for that matter just kept loving me and forgiving me. It wasn’t a regular affair, but it happened a few times and I stopped it completely and gained his trust again, nursed him when he was sick, and I thought ok I hope he’s forgiven me for it. And then he died and I this guilt is eating me up. I feel useless and pointless overall. I’m married and I wish I weren’t; not that my husband is at fault. I just feel like I’m failing at everything. And it’s overwhelming me. My relationship with my family has gotten weird. I just want my brain to stop. I just want all of this to stop.",2.1746648873072374,3.8314646441281153,3.295822953736657,92.28698472716488,76.93594306049822,6.391518386714117,23.096233689205214,7.1686216300943375,0.66291803084223,1059,32,234,12,24,341,150,281,0.257,0.604,0.139,-0.9918,1,0,0,0,1,0,36.0,0,0,0,2,12,20,2,4,10,1,23,8,4,2,3,57,45,23,3,7,10,1,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,21,20,1,5,6,0,0,1,7,12,1,1,16,4,38,8,25,25,9,25,0,3,1,1,21,11,1,3,13,163,59,1,0.0,0.1467016266249444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341545048639755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15095407941293545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382195225973813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596372869243542,0.0,0.0,0.09885694248681673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3855041517434008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669460370756672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112777712327578,0.0,0.1167226363698939,0.0,0.1878151583955583,0.08845412278348297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21898003016816348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270708617034374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12297715260503367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005328466085736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092650576283722,0.0,0.131103188780759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049020760802401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526387319210033,0.11174870795516728,0.0,0.08264809252747085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101895257730176,0.0,0.09549447569096092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09416759162470917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858383737038426,0.10811129140301604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349451052634712,0.1184751201583534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092963135564066,0.07931965314045973,0.0,0.0,0.13293196847290978,0.0,0.10573812489432012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12709526948839558,0.10242181405561956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197130364298693,0.0,0.3105469765272288,0.0,0.1294392899204702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822057735519336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225780000653977,0.0,0.0,0.1965920308740737,0.07219806256775822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605968307094835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132538781016292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238220521783831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261790072112733,0.08795528188455362,0.0,0.0,0.15946679467733538
mentalhealth,dlgyals22,2020/01/25,"depressed and feeling isolated I have struggled with depression and anxiety for the last 5 years, but 2019 was a really good year for me in terms of mental and physical health as well as growing and maintaining healthy relationships. 

I’ve kind of taken steps backward though at the start of this year and had my first anxiety attack since 2018. To give some context without going into a long story, I entered into a relationship at the end of last year but aspects of the relationship have been triggering my anxiety. I’ve been confiding in my best friend about this and she knows about my mental health battles. We don’t live in the same city and at first she was concerned and called me to talk. I ended up starting seeing a psychologist and she asked me how my first session went. But I noticed that her replies have gotten fewer and shorter, and I feel like she’s drawing away. It’s hard because I don’t want to dump on her but at the same time we are friends and I’ve been there for her too in some of her darkest times and I wish I could say more but I’m afraid of her getting tired of listening to me and not wanting to be close anymore. I just feel pretty alone and afraid to talk to even my other close friends about how I’m doing right now because of this issue. That they’ll just pull away not bc they dislike me necessarily but bc it’s burdensome or they don’t know what to say back so they just would rather put distance. I guess also another thing to mention is that I am Asian American and the stigma of mental health is palpable in my circle of friends and family. I’m not even sure why I’m really writing but i just feel so isolated",5.008143015521063,5.913351067073172,5.550155210643016,81.82544345898006,68.8170731707317,8.768514412416852,30.457871396895786,8.97023862654752,2.4092329268292687,1322,51,259,23,22,426,170,328,0.126,0.732,0.14300000000000002,0.9016,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,2,0,4,4,21,18,3,3,11,0,21,4,0,3,1,62,46,33,0,6,17,0,5,1,4,2,4,3,0,0,11,24,0,0,6,0,0,7,7,8,1,3,9,9,39,10,45,33,7,45,0,2,1,0,32,19,0,4,20,181,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929087812627963,0.0,0.07173817945151642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406498700356657,0.2058754622407032,0.0,0.08896464866086308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386337894683886,0.10205398581597193,0.16856424039377904,0.06897868799047177,0.0,0.10936838339574913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414133731741997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916002690053334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162326469928586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545279898895074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15890649663612322,0.0,0.0,0.11850046856411807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456721471265685,0.0,0.1814330144268459,0.06408627346237619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289126661071028,0.0,0.0,0.2772277830681661,0.0,0.046867893975434866,0.08605455755194492,0.050982217092232975,0.07524147619489541,0.0,0.0,0.0988217183981668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035931850333804,0.0,0.0,0.286061140098046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09363018008113362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341541613146842,0.0986005880274786,0.1462453856164869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04382601810491993,0.0,0.07921239887297117,0.07938734528897567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27120887038490993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213133635368128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091263663643742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017971382759304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11493643986596708,0.0,0.0,0.2889333209815396,0.0,0.07660877949084853,0.0,0.14267626718342166,0.0,0.0,0.07148439024140735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420606499199542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269893099666215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378061157108693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454722482511494,0.0,0.0,0.14420522020543652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959694924041373,0.0,0.08813608718166133,0.0,0.10461705199421367,0.10310431589041784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058223234435904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065683115721761,0.08315873591352313,0.08094607732897438,0.0,0.10315793829194377,0.08647377297795662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372485611678501,0.0,0.0,0.23107193402111545
mentalhealth,alienboy00,2020/01/25,hearing voices/seeing a shadow person i think my best friend is having a psychotic break he hears this voice and has conversations with is all the time the other day we smoked a joint and got pretty high and he thought that the voice was real he went away from the group to talk to him he said that it was now a shadow figure thing (its normally just  a voice) and about a week ago we were at lunch and the voice was talking a lot he was shaking and seemed really scared he told me later that he saw blood everywhere and he thinks its some kind of ptsd passed down from one of his parents. I dont know what to do its getting a lot worse and it seems like its starting to tell him to do things idk if i should tell his parents or something because hes starting to loose touch with reality. has anyone gone through this or know what to do?,4.604306220095694,5.093237713450293,4.756937799043062,88.64583732057419,69.52631578947367,7.621690590111643,25.486975013290802,7.348242739294969,0.9580011695906436,663,17,143,6,11,207,105,171,0.068,0.857,0.076,0.5279,2,0,2,0,0,0,6.0,2,0,0,1,3,6,0,2,13,0,16,2,1,0,1,31,34,11,0,3,4,2,1,1,1,1,0,7,0,1,16,12,1,0,8,0,0,4,1,2,0,1,12,9,12,4,18,21,5,17,0,0,1,0,29,4,0,8,9,93,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12405206619560508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978522200826694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148215782800265,0.0,0.0,0.08530866934434388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686277638000214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025241471390882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16401352927213744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081205214181985,0.0,0.07311505475121688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192613981430106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154545090805768,0.0,0.0,0.14785870293327005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14573032167052158,0.15381931596734155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836965439387042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23795106397847576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711557721900042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482979385132474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107828871317693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219385453586605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423735354442481,0.0,0.0,0.16358725008970082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15928710729639806,0.08965182111782907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311895603783142,0.0,0.1401085312856835,0.0,0.0,0.25479983951721097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773586193222973,0.0,0.0,0.19810641280137947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249636515832788,0.24463475212467994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859453812455166,0.17934115155825234,0.0,0.11110004196502864,0.08160257305861658,0.0,0.0,0.13372265510177414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122547748024486,0.0,0.0,0.12972965101751865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14261506871819854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BluntKingonGod,2020/01/25,"22M stuck in “that point” in my life What’s good y’all. I’ve always wanted to help people and do the right thing in life, I’m just at a point where I’m like what direction do I want to go? We’ll start when I was in high school I got expelled for giving my friend weed (he told them I sold it to him and I was labeled as a dealer) so I didn’t graduate high school long story short. No degree. I’ve been smoking weed daily for about 5 years, my longest streak sober is 5 days. I’m currently working and splitting rent with my moms. That’s about $2400 per month for a 2 bed 2 bath in Southern California. About 9 months ago I got caught up in a mlm where I waisted a lot of money and in the last month I’ve broken free from that and I really don’t know where to go from here. About 4 months ago I got caught up in a one sided relationship where I just adored the girl and waisted my money and time on someone who just couldn’t see me in the same light. I’ve learned sometimes you just aren’t for that person and I’m working on coming to terms with that.Half of my money I spent on weed for the girl and myself, we rolled a lot of blunts and drive around together. We had a lot of fun together and we’re still friends. The other of my money was spent on the mlm. In total I’ve spent $40,000 that I’ve received from the father who passed a year ago from tongue cancer (which runs in my family and I fear I might have) I have $0 left from my half of his savings and I am absolutely ridiculously ashamed of waisting. I’m venting to this sub that I just found in the hopes of receiving support cause I’m in deep pain from my mistakes and I’m so ashamed. I’ve strongly never believed in self harm or taking ones life but if I’m not numbing myself I really don’t know what to do with myself. I know I need help and this is my first cry for it.",1.4243387881468372,2.8837525639097734,3.0048098186643086,94.42142083149052,78.49874686716792,5.997375792422233,20.507223942208466,6.661559191721324,0.06884543712221712,1439,35,340,13,34,474,193,399,0.086,0.8320000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.3447,3,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,3,2,1,4,19,19,1,3,18,0,20,9,3,1,2,51,55,22,0,7,9,2,0,1,2,2,6,0,3,4,18,22,3,0,5,1,10,10,8,8,0,4,18,2,43,12,57,34,6,65,0,0,1,0,26,35,0,7,21,199,61,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732222681180889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854891102865445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914616659346489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575442238093285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554376248675508,0.0,0.08850265503466125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285664979890515,0.06625973057792882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685548787357734,0.11561268620262764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739181817910198,0.0,0.11265068825146217,0.15875556663662238,0.0,0.0,0.09855895318012664,0.11678065846493632,0.08617464711290829,0.2465151506105997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377308459085448,0.21710394898610189,0.0,0.10204543423023728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693920289997514,0.08374798804284325,0.0,0.0,0.11162887747735918,0.0,0.2177079569776491,0.050194278947594935,0.0,0.0,0.09092294318877553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620413000570197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899243399051026,0.0,0.12032953527007875,0.3280289555485421,0.0,0.0,0.0761814774975577,0.07924053396951129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13924052029559653,0.0,0.1093241382225989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122797960982763,0.08970986433427082,0.0,0.0,0.19424774353860771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163759733007036,0.0,0.0,0.11030585892214784,0.0,0.08774063019808691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079596490521259,0.0818716273877761,0.0,0.10718173120380643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705249049702486,0.0,0.1016139133454364,0.0,0.0727209215376064,0.0,0.08204944839104701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658977097302747,0.0,0.0,0.07724877814163604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825684887542098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05990936112312593,0.0,0.0,0.09817385083042407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12119912899898842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959398701147225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232424042550733
mentalhealth,BGLAVI22,2020/01/25,"New roommate with schizophrenic symptoms An intelligent, friendly guy 90% of the day. However, on a daily basis, he lost his nerve accusing others of coughing, clearing throat. I never heard a peep. When person actually coughs or hacks he goes ape.  Jumps around, threatens person, acting bizarre. Odd paranoid speech, 'their listening through your teeth..' Then in a flash he's back to normal self. Multiple personalities.",5.689983660130721,9.423082279411766,5.230196078431373,71.02199346405231,79.1470588235294,7.7281045751634005,32.55555555555556,8.515128840125781,3.743288888888889,337,17,45,8,9,103,62,68,0.177,0.7390000000000001,0.083,-0.6124,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,1,1,3,2,0,0,5,0,0,6,2,0,2,6,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,5,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,3,4,1,8,1,0,11,0,1,0,0,14,3,0,1,6,23,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.2364099200801451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21566194702342545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18628228214180545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15623706784319885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18716876765684826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398745814737749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644544083231757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868451406871511,0.2339753333242387,0.0,0.0,0.2373624662368497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6345938643855449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527290597710133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517999480370335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myknugget,2020/01/25,"What to do when you’re in a good place, and others are bringing you down? So I’ve been intensively working on my mental health for the past year, generally treating it for the past 3 years. I’m a college student (22) and last semester was incredible for me compared to previous semesters. (Hope I don’t sound like I’m bragging, I’ve just worked so hard and feel genuinely happy for the first time in a long time- I hope you all get there soon too!) 

My friend (21) who is also my roommate has also struggled with their mental health. Everyone’s MH is different and I try to be cognizant of that. I’ve always had a hard time with them because their anxiety is taking things like having crushes on boys and partying and taking them to the extreme. They genuinely get worked up about it, and they need constant reassurance. Many of our conversations are me telling them how great they are, no that person doesn’t hate you, he’ll text back eventually, etc. I am completely aware how I am judgmental of these things because I know for me my anxiety comes from “larger” traumas and I wish it was as “simple” as theirs. I never express my judgment to them though, I truly do believe in validating their feelings. 

After a while, it got to a point where constantly catering to my friend’s anxiety was tiring for me and took a toll on my MH. They are incredibly sensitive and I knew they would take it the wrong way if I said that I couldn’t help them anymore. So I guided them to other resources for certain issues and made it clear I wasn’t the best person to talk to about certain things. (For example I am queer, they are straight and therefore I am of no help with straight relationships) 

It didn’t work as well as I wanted, and so I started using more non-verbal cues to let them know I was not available for them to vent to. (Before if I was watching a tv show I would take off my headphones and listen, vs then I would acknowledge what they said and go back to watching my show. They would then go and call people and see who would listen to them)

Anyway, they were away last semester. And now they’re back and in all honesty I kind of forgot how they were. They are already starting to take a toll on my MH a few days in. I love living with them but the constant anxiety emanating off of them rubs off on me. 

I’m afraid of bringing this up. First of all because they are incredibly sensitive. Secondly I am afraid that it will upset them and I will look like an asshole for saying “Hey I’m doing super well right now and I’d like to keep it that way and your bad energy is ruining it” (obviously I would not say it like that and I have become very good at phrasing things to help with their sensitivity). 

If you’ve struggled with your MH, been in a good place, and then been surrounded by others still struggling, what do you advise I do? How would you handle this type of situation if you were in my shoes?

They are a great friend and I love them dearly. If they weren’t then I would’ve just politely cut them out. I’m completely at a loss and I really, really don’t want my safe space to be drowned in negativity. Thank you all.",4.337880983750551,5.46127667149759,5.172611257502564,83.11545619235841,70.52979066022544,8.35076855511638,27.80123700775875,8.710501217029153,1.9464586151368768,2467,85,498,42,44,803,269,621,0.085,0.753,0.162,0.993,2,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,1,9,33,9,29,43,2,6,21,0,56,7,1,7,9,85,103,53,1,19,11,0,5,5,3,10,3,7,0,3,32,34,0,3,6,3,0,6,13,13,2,3,22,16,92,30,76,67,8,73,0,2,4,3,72,32,1,7,38,358,124,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152083602018917,0.1036590809287004,0.053928159469758624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19832174317596735,0.0,0.06427535369476724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060892311354488575,0.14950757299867767,0.05411469415716072,0.11852502592210798,0.0715789436831913,0.055149607895627006,0.07302009494034076,0.06801541785931284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617954184585785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055829160909602486,0.1359067441027272,0.2101138393062265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04179790039986178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771397135709495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228168594808587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061929935468947116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554103989466703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110256847715879,0.0,0.0,0.15021905396363405,0.0,0.06772241575827521,0.0,0.07366746421352957,0.16308182748112685,0.05183548450120515,0.14290928386181972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899279044278883,0.11611631580004705,0.0639877004173566,0.0,0.13778267536521582,0.0,0.0,0.13032486238010033,0.0,0.0,0.12874440807451382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764611597760486,0.0,0.057607224960818035,0.0,0.06749095289841105,0.07123714605042017,0.10565965277467018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627390349843963,0.0,0.15831753719757075,0.0,0.057229529158035,0.05735592478748538,0.05442513448791856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698938342625795,0.06132598040477138,0.0,0.06570844416982588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306290107478537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04805672738153115,0.0499864384838407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373936066241893,0.04493196654208345,0.11318138307003585,0.1354279427141899,0.0,0.06126758867345228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303950429753441,0.0,0.0,0.06958303730689963,0.0,0.05534846112492869,0.1233006980132438,0.10308102909529966,0.0,0.0,0.051646182338519114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285057068242387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174748550600123,0.0,0.0517583552151501,0.0,0.0,0.20326440004573096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436500048077959,0.052092835035348894,0.05664789710095389,0.05966949968638088,0.0,0.0,0.17223088268056425,0.0,0.06367673297366973,0.0,0.1133758990899617,0.07449100818209564,0.0,0.0,0.07200769354466639,0.0440025905872239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05597611869427642,0.0,0.05347607631868316,0.07645471960517093,0.10288832147138738,0.0,0.0,0.11654621085037598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07452974939982562,0.0,0.0,0.18873347401163507,0.0,0.0,0.3683204713520213,0.07086093755351723,0.0,0.08347265184375892
mentalhealth,aleksthepanman,2020/01/25,"Do I (17F) have an eating disorder or am I just getting in my head? Ok I know it's not good to self diagnose and that I should talk to my doctor, therapist or psychiatrist but basically all I've gotten from them is vague answers or that it's not that big of a deal. So here I am.

So not everytime but a lot of the time, I get very nauseous when I eat. I don't know why but it just happens. I also am a very picky eater anyways so it's really hard to find food that I'll eat. Even food that I want to eat makes me nauseous. Tonight for dinner we made breakfast for dinner which is my absolute favorite. I love breakfast food, and we got some really nice bacon and we had avocado toast and eggs and even quiche! I was stoked, and I'm thinking I'll actually eat a full meal! I have a very small appetite also so I was very excited because I can usually eat more of foods that I like. A few bites in and I already am feeling a bit gross. I figured I would push through and ignore it but it didn't work.

I am so upset. This was a meal that I was super excited for. I'm at the end of my rope with this.

TL;DR - I have a very small appetite and I get nauseous when I eat, even with foods that I like. I almost never want to eat, even when I'm hungry",0.04475681935151954,2.037800436567167,2.6320483787956768,92.65201492537315,85.67910447761193,5.7861039629439,20.808543489449306,7.0983637204850245,0.4725093669583114,959,31,222,14,29,332,130,268,0.07400000000000001,0.772,0.154,0.9718,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,3,0,1,2,19,12,0,1,12,1,21,24,1,2,2,45,39,26,0,4,12,0,2,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,17,14,20,1,7,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,9,2,35,9,19,28,7,16,0,0,0,1,8,7,0,6,10,148,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.07639031129581841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838644424762249,0.0,0.08638429217655351,0.125201505351114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047718963401559115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546184737455195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070358431421215,0.0,0.07945288850285938,0.0,0.0,0.08971604158380428,0.08012323612876981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.640802573180765,0.0,0.0,0.06933313871716118,0.0,0.0,0.20681368223272253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0395808875767186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154680465968538,0.0,0.473284436792585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226947266412016,0.0,0.0,0.06565782792695182,0.06260793200181992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922303846246021,0.0,0.07012380103963507,0.0,0.08033820381155334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604164577307513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764876315824204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06655113835803711,0.07065105528545515,0.07407074223522693,0.05225272901355055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037461734416106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029676945344257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166345787377399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629187651096291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088949811977473,0.0,0.050158875489300536,0.0,0.0,0.0456458907070663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621472558825431,0.32294735759693804,0.09234353517323568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063582329061352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056989013515987175,0.0,0.0,0.05560810139806227,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1Mephistopheles1,2020/01/25,"Whats Wrong With Me? So im 18 years old and I think I might be suffering from some sort of mental condition. The reason I believe I might be mentally ill is the way I react to certain scenarios and old started feeling like there might be something wrong when my friend moved into my house with his girlfriend. At first everything seemed to be going well, I mean we all got along and had a good group dynamic going. But for some reason I tend to get to invested in there lives and would feel bad or angry whenever they do things without me even though I know its irrational to feel this way I still just get to upset and take it out on them and claim something along the lines of they don't like me and that's the reason they exclude me even though they show me immense amount of care and support. Its gotten so bad to the point where I started hovering over them while they just do there daily routines, I also don't find a lot of joy in pleasure in doing average things like sports,games,music, and just things in life in general I tend to only feel happy when I have some sort of company or if I'm fighting someone. I didn't really have a lot of friends or outside interactions with other people besides my parents growing up and I feel like this might be a contributing factor to this problem. I also have a lot of unhealthy habits that I want to shake, but always seem to lead no where whenever I try to stop them. A good example of this is smoking I chain smoke about two packs of cigarettes a day and if I don't have a cigarette I also get irrationally mad and all this getting mad for bullshit has led to unnecessary violence. I got in a lot of fights when I was going through my high school years which I always tended to start with random people at that sometimes I did it to blow off some steam and other times it was just for the enjoyment of it. These actions got me expelled from the school in general, but I cant understand why I feel so hostile and bad at random moments knowing that its stupid to feel that way without any justification and the littlest reasons. I would go to a therapist with these issues, but my family is lower class and money been tight. The only reason I decided to go to the people of reddit is because recently i've just been having more and more thoughts of violence on random people or even the people that are close to me and since I can't get any professional help I'm hoping someone here will be able to help me.",7.219612244897959,6.221044593877551,7.466244897959182,76.44304081632653,64.28571428571428,10.53387755102041,33.885714285714286,9.692545771848811,3.028895510204082,1961,70,379,33,25,640,230,490,0.161,0.7390000000000001,0.1,-0.9895,2,0,5,0,3,0,21.0,1,0,8,2,28,33,6,2,21,0,39,2,0,9,3,101,81,40,0,7,17,1,8,4,3,7,2,0,0,0,27,29,0,2,23,1,2,11,9,15,1,2,12,8,53,18,67,56,13,54,0,1,0,0,20,22,0,26,22,278,80,6,0.0668582703469213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603996039236156,0.11126287366601434,0.0,0.0,0.09093183300737452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16747158920358368,0.04075618104745355,0.0,0.0,0.07532637566634788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816646248882459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04311805332705978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247777102632907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008790234165429,0.0,0.06302802704939467,0.0,0.2366388524755881,0.0955271233895093,0.0,0.0,0.06110724785739284,0.056869610602528015,0.0,0.0,0.103309067641842,0.0,0.1746534339146064,0.0,0.1899854789380007,0.11215509019569228,0.16041799924699102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117187200878314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962737860337555,0.07063943339528306,0.0,0.0664053481133228,0.0,0.07714546741714096,0.0,0.0,0.0722184049114686,0.06978266391822117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07348711377568906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04722397357998704,0.1306542949993,0.0,0.059037077616626785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22736204229831786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282825658137518,0.0,0.0,0.13475482255337512,0.2837042372529227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105976056314274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14031301591494155,0.0,0.0,0.1016974546957607,0.0,0.0,0.07423819707740237,0.0,0.0,0.2317555320862033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320267598061012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397433531536473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04283111998809321,0.3437071857291853,0.06601447612575115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353282779675693,0.0,0.1217305166056266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05530585212527553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329759100331713,0.10294152582523054,0.06612453893465127,0.0,0.14196788360753956,0.0,0.05339310106339993,0.05589650772519842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586997288333715,0.0,0.0,0.05026909868647687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762760497351243,0.13325299200934926,0.04284008001967245,0.13137582231574085,0.05307799851418747,0.03898559509925752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04539237687343197,0.0,0.06531081524229944,0.06960181731468883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039434740088667986,0.15920694901518145,0.0,0.0,0.06011361439736195,0.0,0.06032918984937801,0.0,0.0,0.12889797354298205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498839399392872,0.14619804607449188,0.0,0.08610906813783865
mentalhealth,Cheeky_Clown,2020/01/25,"Can I cure my mental problems with Xanax? I've had pretty intense anxiety since I was young. And for all of my teenage and adult life - I've had depression and PTSD. And its been pretty ridiculous for a while now, I've been having ""waking up screaming in the middle of the night"" night terrors since I was 13. Im now 21. It's getting to the point now that thinking about having to deal with this bull the next 60 years of my life, I'd honestly rather just die. I never would, my family keeps me going but living like this makes me feel like I'll never be content. I don't want to be happy, I just want to go to sleep. I just want to not be a burden to my family. I want to be able to drive down the highway and not almost choke on my puke cause I can't control my own mind and fuckin relax. 

Moral of the story - should I get anxiety meds? I really don't want to but nothing's working.",1.373582887700536,3.1108210106951897,3.1502673796791463,92.06893048128343,79.53475935828877,5.897326203208556,20.090909090909093,6.794906146795322,0.20965454545454604,687,17,152,7,17,229,107,187,0.139,0.71,0.151,0.8592,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,8,12,2,1,8,0,18,6,2,3,3,35,31,9,1,9,8,0,1,2,0,2,3,1,0,1,5,8,0,2,2,1,0,3,7,7,0,0,6,2,20,5,23,19,2,20,1,1,0,1,2,6,1,1,13,96,25,1,0.13274045032756426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292038668473216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20309216234799365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636100752628785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488797021919537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684957567410422,0.11432915536064385,0.0,0.13776363042563855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502717659425601,0.0,0.06711756008988659,0.09482980423680797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387028132722126,0.0,0.15087891385206592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14130467767233634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14338246472940874,0.0,0.0,0.1179858113064186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18751701133570026,0.12970055810183045,0.0,0.11721224955702525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860528134013837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744471612145965,0.0,0.13377115304307075,0.0,0.13403001478202234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20475523696361647,0.0,0.1411709748309406,0.2491358410954169,0.0,0.12736804211904054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548263106479898,0.0,0.0,0.2700895180728784,0.0,0.12701468397408444,0.1551664830185255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503693149332622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21960854442585206,0.0,0.1328363138932918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505472074543527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3914687839483783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966366287696,0.0,0.0,0.09429500740312532,0.0,0.0,0.08548049794433513
mentalhealth,klf052494,2020/01/25,"I Wrote a Poem I’m a recovering addict and this poem is about a recent downward spiral that brought me to the point of finally asking for help. This poem marks the beginning of my road to health and recovery. 

”Take a piece” she said to me, 
“I promise I’m your friend “
Calmness, peace, and happinesss, 
no doubt a true godsend

“Anxiety’s my middle name,” I said,  
“I don’t know who I am”  
Life has been so hard for me  
And this stuff is my jam

She said she’d never leave me  
But she wanted me to die  
I had a life my future bright  
My head stuck in the sky

Her blanket sewn by satan’s hands  
Stayed draped around me tight  
She held me close 
and whispered soft  
(Stay here you’ll be alright)

They taste so good I couldn’t stop  
It’s one it’s two it’s three  
False confidence and slurring words  
Why can’t she leave me be?

She took my pep she took my step  
Is this what they call death?  
I’ll have you know there was a time  
She even took my breath

I ran to him and told him  
Thinking he won’t understand  
I hurt him worse than she hurt me
That was not at all my plan

He’s crying in his room alone  
It’s taken an extreme  
The man I loved so deeply  
Felt like nothing but a dream

I wish he knew the pain I felt  
When looking in his eyes  
See that’s the thing that stupid bitch  
She taught me how to lie

But what went wrong? 
I asked myself  
How did I get so lost?  
I never loved myself enough
So now I pay the cost

That precious brown haired little girl  
Her big eyes filled with tears  
What’s wrong with me? 
She thought all day  
So different from her peers

Why do I care, why do I feel  
This shit is way too much  
They’re mean to me, I’m way too fat  
I couldn't eat my lunch

My tears turned into anger  
And my anger soon to rage  
I’m done with xans I swear I am  
It’s time to turn the page

Since then I’ve told them everything  
Thank God for honesty  
Her knife’s no longer in my back  
(She left me there to bleed)

But hear me out, I lost control  
I didn’t have a choice  
She said she’d be my closest friend  
Then robbed me of my voice

I kicked her to the curb  
And while her damage is still done  
I’m stronger with-out her, you see  
I know she’s not the one",-1.4337736765420104,0.5554407586206906,0.20830135988343912,105.20908814958716,99.38793103448276,3.476153472559495,12.785211267605634,5.273055473050347,-1.5004807795046142,1648,29,418,10,71,521,236,464,0.18899999999999997,0.6920000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.9889,1,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,4,3,4,21,29,6,1,20,1,31,19,8,3,5,53,82,25,2,4,6,0,8,1,2,2,7,7,2,2,21,16,4,5,11,1,2,8,12,15,0,4,31,23,92,14,32,42,6,49,1,5,7,2,58,19,2,1,19,243,113,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201910477038902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742306137946781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457324028782767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514258804238373,0.1578234742832618,0.0,0.0,0.06490590008934832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619180911412602,0.0,0.08606138250283793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467273057193117,0.0,0.0,0.09272016485837972,0.05443731630882583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760401098251569,0.08819024022807467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276099502859202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637226399064178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721785288661768,0.0,0.05575185464694575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586205530419111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04268011414237401,0.0,0.16209322600516338,0.0924667732195473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304295523299852,0.0,0.04410061908089562,0.0,0.0,0.07079890729663559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561457096351631,0.0,0.08662877258687958,0.0897236345483674,0.0951359414941962,0.0,0.05657808716402396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18072480155923867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391682003899495,0.0,0.0,0.17875550970621756,0.09171145821800768,0.0,0.1192422286615641,0.04123834818117782,0.08460076121538969,0.0,0.0,0.07088294466769449,0.0,0.18428646253909808,0.0,0.15236621958099048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09194698122543908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205089064648845,0.0,0.13020403115298576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099344744432198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439648456496646,0.0,0.08981794282447324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797945129345967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083344461090586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32117207011040005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345273105686694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664541225095479,0.06982463106661943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17993915989904846,0.06740974851648307,0.07057034436398674,0.0,0.0,0.0966289877154887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346563943873497,0.0,0.0,0.07771317212927853,0.0,0.0,0.05607809811579166,0.0540863700185359,0.0,0.06701192589190669,0.09844002723444886,0.0,0.0,0.1613142982712784,0.2813470690628012,0.0,0.18362717402683426,0.08245607659428109,0.08787354373558852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04978706722865725,0.13400108729960492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824869915625543,0.22850005534165024,0.0,0.0970670656583804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860207633316769,0.0,0.18457765747264795,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ahhha-ye,2020/01/25,How Do I Know If I’m Depressed? What are the basic signs of depression and who should I see if I think I’m depressed?,-1.5138461538461527,0.4529333846153882,1.0142307692307675,99.36826923076923,99.76923076923076,4.138461538461539,18.03846153846154,5.985473137389443,-0.3143538461538462,92,3,22,1,4,31,19,26,0.3720000000000001,0.628,0.0,-0.8924,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,8,8,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,7,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.912170793348826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19401140352199064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28131245782802217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262019454725307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DirectImplement,2020/01/25,"I’m not good at anything. I will never be successful. Venting. Currently crying because I feel so worthless. I’m a college student. I’m not good at anything or any career. Parents are upset that I chose education as my major. I suck at teaching anyway. Thought about engineering, computer science, everything else but nothing is for me. I’d suck at literally everything. All I want is to make something of myself and make my parents proud. My dad is always talking about how others people’s kids are smarter and successful and it makes me feel bad because I’m not. I won’t ever find a career for me. Everyone in my family is in medicine, technology, or engineering. And I will be the dumb teacher that doesn’t even like her job. 
Everyone is better looking and is allowed to wear nice clothes but I have confidence issues because growing up my dad always used to criticize me for looking nice. My cousins are allowed to wear what they want. They get a free pass because they are successful. I will never be them ever. I’m just fat and ugly and stupid and I know that bc my dad always says so",2.1503790945896206,4.938150009569384,3.918205741626796,81.28840172984908,84.78947368421052,6.468973132131026,29.09109311740891,7.748469712250963,2.42659057784321,868,44,150,17,26,290,114,209,0.193,0.6579999999999999,0.149,-0.8698,6,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,4,5,10,18,4,1,4,0,19,3,3,7,5,35,39,16,0,2,8,6,2,1,0,4,1,1,0,1,6,8,1,0,5,0,1,2,7,7,0,0,1,5,27,12,18,31,2,14,0,1,2,0,14,7,3,2,6,100,33,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3279000370970273,0.0,0.0,0.08932764492470104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21619215821151336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967807540064936,0.3202973962967188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617508674758265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14429011107056247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973238555545417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676042920851891,0.23764086591857764,0.0,0.2510355546755588,0.2361114090468232,0.0,0.12383221660375365,0.0,0.13283665790529192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005842966979888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06862890327235979,0.0,0.0,0.2203529774372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371031643864712,0.13035210903199151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219067942206209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417466846092335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061453352098576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630465729881837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20262209569617015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260411211043354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917140494833032,0.0,0.0,0.09106679232058412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044608036465709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112546687778066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558023061624483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428322948696367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345075607295395,0.0,0.0,0.15495618393847735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jackalina_the_bunny,2020/01/25,"I AM NOT ENOUGH 
Why am I such a bonehead idiot?why am I seemingly incapable of thinking logically and like an adult? Most days I wonder why My boyfriend is still with me/ says he wants to be with me? I’m holding him back so much and it just isn’t fair to him. It makes me think that he thinks he loves me because he made a commitment kinda but I really think he feels responsible for me because if my past attempts and self harm and my family abuse. I know for a fact if I had somewhere to go he would have broken up with me by now and kicked me out. I know that my mental health issues are hurting him and that he would be better off without me so he could live the life he deserves with a woman more deserving of him but I can’t seem to bring myself to the place where I let him go. I know that if we ever broke up I wouldn’t live long after because he is my only reason to live and I constantly fail him even though I am so devoted to him and I am trying to change everything about myself that he doesn’t like but it’s hard and I can’t do it fast enough for him. I’m stuck. I finally have a decent paying job but it’s not enough. I’m showing responsibility by taking care of the piggies and cleaning up after myself and keeping the house tidy but it’s not enough. I AM NOT ENOUGH",1.9473100812231257,3.481327578754584,3.6918776875298636,89.73464405160057,77.24175824175823,6.652587991718428,22.12597547380156,7.423996415210882,0.6662213409778629,1011,28,225,13,23,339,135,273,0.11800000000000001,0.787,0.095,-0.8592,1,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,1,0,0,3,13,10,0,0,10,0,24,3,0,3,3,59,49,23,0,8,14,0,2,2,0,3,2,1,1,3,11,17,0,3,13,1,1,3,10,4,0,0,3,3,43,6,29,39,8,22,0,3,0,1,25,7,0,8,14,160,54,3,0.0,0.12031589264500947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808292236382326,0.0,0.18570524980687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980954889731498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353333424606792,0.0,0.10742263880191166,0.0,0.0,0.1097355958166616,0.0,0.08107654668251177,0.0,0.0,0.06548903469770237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5246229407735115,0.0,0.06707044709408531,0.09185454285085293,0.0,0.0,0.0912633669130694,0.0,0.09572891937065088,0.0,0.05134491678677165,0.0,0.0,0.11123913025774444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542233159605167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096563896333648,0.0,0.0,0.10793908690883336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717092499816065,0.1087075337522608,0.0,0.0,0.10598807102848673,0.10076914455345022,0.0902591163241739,0.0,0.0,0.16742175629029984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383808574690616,0.07172523353233767,0.09922089471097724,0.0,0.2690020253344676,0.08986537870545427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09164960102266703,0.09608566985847856,0.06778301820246611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233489882928448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464829653831384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723062180846417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09693754000044773,0.0,0.0,0.10609438697400887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505323145656403,0.10440662356128287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075378220575967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848880784409644,0.10593505365239143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810950954032174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763502638472523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26026736092002384,0.09976883372741796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894334773248627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059894704484279575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748895255563897,0.0,0.0,0.09788711700166514,0.11012275160063308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14427131445295266,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unfilteredflower,2020/01/25,I need someone to rant to please Struggling through difficulties and am wanting a peer support companion please .,12.166666666666664,13.26134677777778,9.130000000000004,61.665000000000006,53.444444444444436,11.644444444444444,56.88888888888889,11.20814326018867,7.148488888888887,94,7,12,2,1,27,16,18,0.3,0.405,0.29600000000000004,-0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24972798661038886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7393958781304499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853638954684092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35208951405831745,0.0,0.0,0.3821890795619437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19864943197524945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Radical_Rapidash,2020/01/25,Rant That frustrating moment when you tell someone it’s getting bad again and you just need someone to talk to. They don’t believe your as low as you really are. You do bad things again and they freak out wondering why you didn’t tell them. I just want someone to talk to and listen!,2.9447368421052644,4.916914000000002,3.3472280701754364,91.36926315789476,75.66666666666667,6.665263157894738,23.68070175438596,7.554174236665415,0.9459922807017548,226,7,47,3,5,70,37,57,0.271,0.7090000000000001,0.02,-0.9459,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,6,3,0,5,5,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,9,9,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,1,10,0,7,8,0,6,0,1,0,0,14,2,0,1,4,32,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3718108385556754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508529628970522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632666775761713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16509390272146815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263680229091874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5659578628507735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35791906392346456,0.3892159505207925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479203336358758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313261298556932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20090912232295624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24145698524260675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,annnzzzz,2020/01/25,I can't fall asleep It's 3AM already and I wanted to fall asleep 3 hours ago but I've been crying so much and I don't know how to keep the tears stop from flowing. I've been having all kinds of thoughts and just the main thought of dissapearing. I'm so scared of myself and I just want to wake up tomorrow and feel okay but I can't because there's this persistent feeling and also when I close my eyes my brain just doesn't shut up. I'm not sure how to go to sleep but I wish I would soon,-0.5150317572335901,1.5466060642201889,1.3203669724770677,100.53011997177136,89.2752293577982,4.454763585038815,16.64149611856034,5.8734145424116955,-0.7796060691601978,387,9,97,3,13,126,68,109,0.158,0.757,0.085,-0.8675,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,11,4,0,1,2,1,8,6,6,2,2,29,20,15,0,4,7,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,2,5,0,0,4,5,1,0,0,4,3,11,3,11,15,3,14,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,6,58,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19905937519483285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478081470281299,0.17958098784198373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13689002480306373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506838364382989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24666921569338354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270891191206076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762293353130436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221146903948034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19959973159350652,0.0,0.23384525279034624,0.12341260354775276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507783988761865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22482428187223485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22472272136276286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18774267196423527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21164565743759595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35655198040485064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649032568853707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582335459841122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952136922117874,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plainsliceofbread,2020/01/25,"Consequences for therapists after client suicide Do therapists have to be questioned or talked to after a client of theirs commits suicide? Is there any way they could get into any kind of ""trouble?"" 

If the client stops seeing the therapist a while before they commit suicide, would the therapist necessarily even hear about it?",8.395545454545456,10.698304145454543,7.15068181818182,68.28602272727274,62.09090909090909,9.863636363636363,35.56818181818181,10.125756701596842,4.164909090909092,268,12,37,6,4,81,41,55,0.257,0.693,0.05,-0.9407,0,0,0,0,0,4,6.0,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,5,0,6,0,0,0,2,9,9,3,3,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,9,6,0,6,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,3,4,29,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207450106693566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979107347263535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178211592103055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007440659118388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969018615745796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719114390215394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883563928421746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17086755741738452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154598558825615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752120030891428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5005264051914259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12259715413147952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7083924034750353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210705406722198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835233282437463,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spilledlaughter91,2020/01/25,"trauma tw: trauma 

disconnect question - does anyone know what it’s like to lack a connection to anything that ISNT real? yes, i’ve has a traumatic life. but a lot of people i know who have had a traumatic life dive into fantasy to escape the bad. and i’m the opposite.. like.. it’s hard for me to invest any emotion in something that isn’t real. ive been this way since i was young. i remember telling my youth activities center “i can’t watch this movie because all of its fake” - i was 7. also now i can’t get into movies or anything that isn’t “real” because i feel way to self aware to be that “naive?” even when i listen to people talk it’s like i only resonate with parts that i can relate to or have been through cause that’s something i’ve dealt with personally, which again would be reality.",2.170370370370371,4.180538753086419,4.063975308641975,85.16188888888892,78.1358024691358,6.789135802469136,23.76296296296297,7.793537801064563,1.2833525925925937,626,21,125,10,15,212,100,162,0.177,0.778,0.045,-0.9635,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,6,1,18,2,0,1,1,21,24,6,0,2,3,0,2,3,0,1,2,1,0,2,15,5,0,0,5,1,1,0,5,4,0,0,5,4,13,3,17,16,4,11,0,0,1,0,7,4,0,4,8,81,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971375586383692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180004492479902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467260147634153,0.0,0.2463780550452587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499191053859482,0.1825095095688892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15378149243919587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131002078057966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839055039842504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887438092168674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569200863751605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821123507907475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341003620421478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16454065064656195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21147281311618668,0.21940522907090207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272682258493883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385237836266365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16210877847752686,0.0,0.2075640426254937,0.1307108681630827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16769646734358507,0.0,0.0,0.5111686547817451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957910448789648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561680785144126,0.0,0.0,0.1238320628706723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23049028282066955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203219029110694,0.1308429992430258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23764724301072504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634144783084086,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Angelo_Maligno,2020/01/25,"Wrote A Short Guide To Help With Hallucinations [https://archive.org/details/hcg\_20200124/mode/2up](https://archive.org/details/hcg_20200124/mode/2up)

This short guide is meant to allow you to change your hallucinations to something less scary or troubling. Based on my personal research and experiences after my diagnosis.",20.889099099099106,26.932056648648647,10.90648648648649,38.83558558558559,36.56756756756757,11.41981981981982,36.65765765765766,11.20814326018867,5.181998198198199,284,9,26,6,3,68,30,37,0.14400000000000002,0.7490000000000001,0.10800000000000001,-0.3702,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,4,0,7,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,17,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5370304063397449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4965828260765092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34026964026331624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44326371574545664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3908166958192042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Britmccar,2020/01/25,"I am more than a murderer’s daughter (trigger warning) 
TRIGGER WARNING: Survivors of murder-suicide

In 2018 I became a survivor of murder-suicide.

Facts were written in the media, case files, autopsy reports and death certificates. They were illustrated with crime scene photos and national news headlines.

Breadcrumbs of truth built the narrative for me, never telling the full story.

There are 11 murder-suicides each week in the United States, often in military and veteran communities. Why aren’t we talking about this publicly beyond sensationalized headlines that don’t help solve the problem?

The lack of support, information, and humanization led me to believe nobody *should* be talking about it. I felt voiceless and carried significant guilt and shame because of the stigmatized circumstances.

I’m taking back the narrative. As a survivor of murder-suicide, I am more than a murderer’s daughter.

I will add to the national conversation on mental health and veteran post-traumatic stress disorder. I hope my story will educate the public and help survivors of this type of tragedy to know they are not alone; the shame is not theirs to carry as they navigate their complex journey.

If you are a survivor of murder-suicide, or know somebody who is looking for support, please connect with me here on reddit. I am connecting with researchers and fellow survivors to reduce the stigma on this awful experience, and help other survivors. I am committed to taking my experience and turning it into a force for good to help others.",8.056336032388664,10.305563038461539,7.628380566801624,64.74398785425106,62.84615384615384,9.781376518218623,40.60728744939272,10.064110947511567,4.926153846153847,1250,70,164,28,19,394,149,260,0.13,0.715,0.155,0.2748,1,1,0,0,0,5,37.0,1,1,5,0,7,12,2,4,18,1,17,2,1,3,4,40,29,15,3,5,4,2,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,9,18,0,0,5,0,0,2,5,7,0,0,4,2,20,5,37,21,5,18,0,0,1,0,23,12,0,4,3,126,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329498583668533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153845571133246,0.0,0.0725688847624553,0.0,0.0,0.1341232405690806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13643618006224376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328982119961989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430211713692627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984951492949674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265395431857414,0.0,0.0,0.31917411014816816,0.0,0.0,0.11823880282687915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13084832175282082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09996803498943246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996962102110376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918150424131512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067594542708724,0.0,0.0,0.11401245068109422,0.0,0.0,0.11391023515794894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636594162341562,0.0,0.0,0.6510809559260665,0.27018229763436113,0.0,0.0,0.17901443834710604,0.19136813916990847,0.10405080323178643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12948705675380515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549092582598548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741982966692458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rpgroves,2020/01/25,"I’ve been close to incapable of crying for at least two years, how do i fix this? So for starters i’m not exactly used to posting things really anywhere on reddit and this is gonna be my first time so here goes nothing

I’m 17 and i’ve struggled with my depression since middle school so it’s been around 5 years. Around mid January of last year i started having some mental problems again just after i broke up with my girlfriend and i found myself almost incapable of crying at anything, even when i really wanted to or felt like i needed to and that continues to this day. I hate it because even when i really want to cry when i’m at my saddest or having an anxiety attack i just can’t and i feel like it just causes me to have even more mental pressure because i can’t have any kind of release. It’s odd in the way that sometimes i can tear up at things but it’s never something directly related to me or my own problems and it’s normally only movies with sad endings. I’m not sure if it’s related to any of my other mental problems or i just can’t cry for some other odd reason. Has anyone else ever had this problem? Any time i ask any of my friends they find it weird that i can’t so i don’t know if this is very common. Thanks to those who read this and wish me luck",3.3683525728820167,4.229868460966543,4.846077088632363,85.53536881236552,72.56877323420075,7.744942281353942,26.053805517511247,8.032893268588372,1.465062453531598,1012,32,212,14,19,340,141,269,0.20199999999999999,0.725,0.073,-0.9824,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,20,19,2,2,2,0,18,0,0,4,4,52,36,22,0,11,13,0,2,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,23,13,0,0,6,1,0,0,8,12,0,2,5,2,28,7,33,29,5,35,0,3,0,0,5,13,0,10,22,146,51,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633177358425923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616809159343638,0.0,0.07359378304566645,0.0,0.0,0.06726623315293144,0.09856966985392714,0.07916552880452682,0.17127922641737126,0.0899352926548517,0.10944294394304853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728692179359752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882530460809047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42269074100234094,0.06204192368483701,0.0,0.08285809711345207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036389849978491,0.0,0.08520585778439854,0.0,0.0,0.1906202883884528,0.08701964479953077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04864230208299215,0.06872627637208878,0.0923683994687568,0.0,0.08792630732657683,0.08182883429883814,0.0,0.10547983432141583,0.07432493811779292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497893406327604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017892068937496,0.052869755855013835,0.07841695457547601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399825796814916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29084505579151865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133209525418728,0.07419642546689975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425691495113646,0.09230780696104574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731654752049865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213431782989316,0.0,0.0,0.3682068667912828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962274012477274,0.0,0.18488717875185526,0.09891102840469684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736092015076216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957876555451637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406051289937884,0.09514561260825866,0.0,0.06809182326844629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005705571718392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906686506469326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856929440089985,0.0,0.0,0.12782382819730126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219158238009558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397475772669672,0.0,0.0,0.08308709411191285,0.0,0.07937620345014343,0.11348411842967385,0.07636016794769315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062682527779072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858515803156916
mentalhealth,Blob_Snail,2020/01/25,"I am at the worst point I have ever been I have been feeling down now for over 4 months. Firstly in mid-August I found out I had massively underperformed in my A level exams compared to where I was expected and how I had been doing. At the end of August my grandfather unexpectedly passed away. He was the closest thing I had to a father and was the only one who understood me. After that point my self-confidence shattered. I haven’t got a job or anything since then I have just been doing nothing. There were even points in the last couple of months where I was pretty much nocturnal. My family doesn’t understand and I receive constant belittling from friends. I have no confidence in public. My only companions are my sisters 2 hamsters I have been looking after while she is away at university. I am not suicidal, I have no plan in life, no confidence and I can’t see things turning around.",3.855310077519382,6.027128639534888,5.0726976744186025,79.11726356589149,73.65116279069767,8.307596899224807,28.327131782945727,9.029198982220553,2.5955406201550377,714,29,128,16,15,236,104,172,0.083,0.8079999999999999,0.109,0.6358,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,9,2,0,0,8,0,28,1,0,1,1,16,36,8,1,1,3,2,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,7,1,0,2,16,3,25,1,22,20,2,36,0,0,2,0,9,21,0,1,13,110,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299712274163735,0.14060015529839892,0.0,0.0,0.29677980604620097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17067711585103645,0.0,0.0,0.1747576930308915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13988803064333216,0.0,0.0,0.10431793242352727,0.14286584343873074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14889184990635765,0.0,0.07985924936716904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343437502720614,0.0,0.1731731441885627,0.12202411302863896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12631910904991894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673115757164066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287422441349982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155774844011657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262988789611976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521325279896547,0.0,0.11610413067459585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515477651954338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702428485929312,0.2402410938320056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4479132753946265,0.0,0.0,0.16068184053736626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585779416568812,0.0,0.16476594755199486,0.0,0.0,0.1306496652215742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276081140316696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20985674061350945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717934520076453,0.0,0.16442119199934413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,natalie91696,2020/01/25,"Downward spiralling for the last year Long story short, I've had a longterm history with depression and self harm since I was 13 (22 now). 2019 was a bad year for me. I slept on my friends couch for a year while working 10 hour shifts a day. Now i have my own room in an apartment and a partner but my mental health is isn't improving.

All i do is work, then come home and sulk in bed. I have no hobbies and have no interest to do anything. My partner says my low self esteem is unattractive and we're spending less and less time together. Ive isolated myself from all my friends and family. I constantly want to hurt myself and it gets harder and harder to stop myself.

I feel myself slipping and don't know what to do. I don't the time to see a therapist because of my job and can't really afford one anyways. 

Any help is appreciated",3.3389321266968324,4.695121400000001,4.572352941176471,85.57251131221722,73.23529411764707,7.8190045248868785,27.78280542986425,8.384062270229773,1.854873303167421,658,25,136,11,13,217,104,170,0.17600000000000002,0.718,0.107,-0.8921,2,0,0,0,0,2,15.0,0,0,0,2,3,8,0,0,9,0,18,2,1,0,2,20,25,14,0,1,1,0,1,0,4,0,1,1,4,4,2,13,0,1,2,0,1,1,6,5,0,1,4,3,21,3,14,21,5,24,0,3,1,0,8,8,0,0,15,88,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609039005060914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404818855003615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425378511209431,0.10406478783702544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14705374852214864,0.0,0.18447962309153856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009547401415268,0.0,0.14703447178646534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093260197869694,0.0,0.0863173961557136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637841900170112,0.0,0.08919026306301606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814594610034732,0.0,0.0,0.1144250258370538,0.0,0.1712386097506806,0.0,0.16811747732002852,0.0,0.18275131879115247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16940586751390924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381915463225476,0.1391535154291693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15107523743032733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17203810144411413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156792440160276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10936283282266916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575747407818609,0.0,0.0,0.13603580254474756,0.0,0.356180847691863,0.0,0.0,0.14121518797017654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272333834420595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19821043174921615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19908772502412345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069068679318473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485615435807565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3297998613820575
mentalhealth,going2deletelater,2020/01/25,"Hello! Does anyone have a clue for what this might be? I never posted on reddit before and im not entirely sure why i'm doing this, but i've always found it hard to search for exactly what has happened to me and any clues are welcome!

Since I was around 13/14 I became (for lack of a better word, i try to avoid self-diagnosing now) extremely depressed. I've tried tracing the source of this and got maybe multiple options and causes, but i digress. At the same time this was happening, I began hearing ""whispers"", as i like to call them, due to the fact that to this day, I'm not entirely sure what this might be. Said whispers never seemed to be coeherent, you could catch a few words (maybe?), but the rest was just incompreehensible mumbling. This terrified me and always seemed to happen at night. This problem was also usually accompanied by weird twitches in my head? Everytime i heard these whispers or seemingly out of nowhere, it was like my head suddenly wanted to twitch and turn around everywhere. I'm not sure if these things were all my imagination or real, I know for a fact that my head twitched (and still does, thankfully very rarely now) and that i felt absolutely miserable. I would also like to point out that i've always had some kind of fixation on characters, and creating them for myself, constantly daydreamed about them. Such characters would often be associated with what was happening to me mentally at the time. I don't know if they have anything to do with it, but i felt like it was important to add.

This lasted to about 2017. From 2016-2017 this problem only worsened, since i was in a ""tricky"" relationship that almost made me make a big mistake. I can recall a very specific night where i could clearly hear someone say ""Come with us"" or ""come with me"". I think i heard some other phrases but that's the only one i can really remember. At this time i also felt some unknown hands pushing me to the inside of my bed. I've been told this can be sleep paralysis? I'm still not sure. During this time i also created a very specific character that i daydreamed almost throughout the entirety of the day and i couldn't distance myself from her (and i still find myself doing it very often).

Thankfully my mental health has never been better now and i'm the happiest i've ever been in a few years. But i would still love some suggestions as to what this might be, since i'm terrified of going to a therapist and don't feel the need to do so now, due to my healthy mental state. Could this be all fabricated in my head or some type of serious issue? Again, any tips would be appreciated.

Thank you!",4.4767298771473705,6.196067685884692,5.3219085487077535,79.87889381658769,70.94831013916502,8.737503186012134,27.6091655197023,9.265573868473778,2.4047912422898508,2078,74,387,45,39,677,226,503,0.10300000000000001,0.77,0.127,0.9504,1,1,0,0,0,0,66.0,1,2,4,2,25,24,0,2,21,0,46,11,6,3,14,104,87,32,0,16,17,0,6,4,0,7,4,9,1,0,36,24,0,1,14,0,0,5,10,8,0,1,24,15,50,16,57,44,12,53,0,2,0,1,21,17,0,22,33,275,86,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959052317182373,0.0,0.0,0.20698640863331244,0.16152558877877332,0.0,0.0,0.08800670209387021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045245021563220966,0.0,0.05324879794712442,0.11520687169990652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05506135677443885,0.0,0.0,0.114457134280687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607364048063566,0.0,0.0,0.06647247554087357,0.0,0.11147964471765276,0.0,0.06992587080088504,0.0,0.15499113353633728,0.0,0.0,0.08346202970997875,0.0,0.055732515630276834,0.06567679837646431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325202131140524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058531681065405676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032718080134293615,0.0,0.18638817857791612,0.0,0.059141525911236385,0.0,0.0,0.07094848566155297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036774790288681185,0.0,0.051752536683457834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22888268133595255,0.0,0.057965252479218125,0.0,0.2656344464289073,0.06878109686635138,0.1458602171060381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989525490179734,0.06753786778134667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738295299613406,0.0711231514410461,0.0527452874107447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645135632925728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05840108774522754,0.061227845771812124,0.043192790252295006,0.0,0.13001485699796786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19562996475401706,0.20593344595281968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04797982638016629,0.14971934860087374,0.0,0.0,0.12144729937095458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043847508661675125,0.09842601103607833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061169547479702366,0.0,0.06197194344818911,0.0,0.0,0.12383276754788525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365135505643007,0.04145331170035065,0.0,0.0,0.06947168962389104,0.07330103705276468,0.0,0.06155169531479924,0.05145803874466584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17672196231503667,0.0675040839743381,0.0,0.0,0.16058025526578887,0.0,0.0647542782676301,0.0,0.054826494801734835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20670212328276547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24394439000631554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787220473263565,0.0,0.07513044969202913,0.04298881914445591,0.041461983502115385,0.0,0.0,0.1509259646651729,0.0,0.0,0.061830834379224264,0.0,0.08786435413677039,0.07038323016900044,0.0,0.0,0.07783521211264416,0.0,0.07126622148341656,0.21356201281812634,0.03816618788330318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05838849677877012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18386554006715988,0.0,0.0,0.041669538909289074
mentalhealth,kikiswirline456,2020/01/25,"I feel so empty....... -I am 24 years old 

-I might as well call myself unemployed since I only work three hours a week

-I do attend graduate school online but there are some complications that forced me to put my education on hold until September of this year

-I only have two friends IRL but we hardly get to see each other much because you know.....we’re adults, and we have other responsibilities 


-I am single. I have had a few dates and a couple of online flings but that’s just about it. Hell, I’ve never even got to hold hands with anybody or kiss anybody. This is probably due to the fact that I have Turner Syndrome and Traumatic Brain Injury. Not only that, I always alienated myself from others due to misantrophic tendencies that I formed due to a volatile relationship with my mother. For all of these reasons, I have never really learned to properly socialize and tend to put people off. Now I that I am getting over the aforementioned misanthropic tendencies, I want so so so badly to find a romantic partner who will stand by me, kiss me, caress me, and cuddle with me while watching a good film or Fire Force. My heart is practically aching for it!!! I am actually developing a concept for an anime series and one of the subplots consists of two misunderstood people who find comfort in one another, fall in love, and just when they think they found someone they can trust/provide them with relief......they discover that  are on the opposite ends of the celestial war that takes place in my story. As I managed to think about all the beautiful moments that these two characters spend together and the immense passion/devotion/love between them, I can’t help but want that for myself..... :( 


What should I do?",6.0409176942930864,7.445872984227133,6.445318325207918,74.51702824777747,66.79179810725553,9.675308287926585,30.812876398049887,9.910423181423305,3.1299097791798123,1364,52,235,31,22,441,189,317,0.13,0.753,0.11699999999999999,-0.8714,2,1,0,0,0,0,56.0,2,1,5,1,13,10,2,0,15,0,21,7,3,1,5,44,34,23,1,3,9,1,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,22,15,0,2,8,1,1,4,4,3,1,6,3,7,39,7,39,28,8,30,1,0,2,4,19,8,1,4,17,179,61,6,0.0,0.0,0.12190870503563135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394754416588492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309946750560592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430709329286883,0.07615307406457968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394575301636697,0.12756231468937854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13822705212426548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11064640284464436,0.0,0.0,0.08251173400448585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631657950699149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283582343766929,0.0,0.0,0.1369737309592664,0.09651668627283487,0.0,0.13053623324566327,0.0,0.0,0.10478109909816742,0.09991387370767957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190819400923327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480366362461674,0.08373454314880459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302588577754575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686554710761093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274962116461627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252560247733752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183419307190667,0.0,0.19269960529278116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13108769294102826,0.0,0.1693047229593802,0.2850331017499509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17321442535832898,0.0,0.1305199565031734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13469019700379933,0.0,0.0,0.2511681059190718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003010510048643,0.1284436279291593,0.0,0.1341226163617066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643069235433466,0.09954899021990657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333918794297696,0.0,0.0,0.1273452276931687,0.10584848257701443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392799563270468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16009369390484002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36610049488498336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14736791355368736,0.0,0.10020723855306933,0.0,0.11232250941671364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094683240769028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089511026309655
mentalhealth,boredofusernames123,2020/01/25,"I can't self improve I've been trying to make myself happier and improved my self-image for the past 2 years and at this point I'm like 100% sure that my issue is psychological and not just ""oh you need to believe in yourself"".

I've read some self help books, I've been working out for like 7 months now, I have friends who are happy with me, I am tall and have a decent physique and I still feel like absolute shit (sometimes I have body issues as well even though I know I don't look bad at all)

  
Every time I feel happy and/or confident, it's only for a few days and then it's back to a shitty self image because maybe someone didn't want to go to a beer with me or someone said something slightly insulting to me or maybe because I tripped over a puddle and questioned my life's value because of that.

Every advice I've read about anxiety / shyness / bad self confidence is usually somewhat helpful and reassures my life's value but then like a day or two later it's like I never even read it or just find another excuse as to why it's not true.

​

Like I get that having friends and an active lifestyle doesn't equal happiness but come on, I'd like to go one week without being irrationally angry and have an existential crisis over a simple mistake.",7.012341005451244,5.995949216535437,7.407165354330707,76.75700484554817,64.70866141732283,9.862628709872807,34.49909145972139,8.841846274778883,2.825019745608722,1007,38,194,13,13,331,149,254,0.11800000000000001,0.655,0.22699999999999998,0.9703,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,1,10,21,2,0,10,0,16,5,2,1,4,40,29,21,0,3,11,0,2,7,2,0,2,1,0,4,10,14,1,0,5,5,0,4,8,5,1,2,4,4,20,16,25,24,5,28,0,0,1,0,15,9,1,7,22,118,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801011081486583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758498537029206,0.1094383794708778,0.0,0.09444061394484543,0.06889919288620343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925413855298883,0.15040040253796788,0.1647076814084633,0.0,0.0,0.10147199243603834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004149661567988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758270101070229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616846668529587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189736729939998,0.0,0.15176666485297646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107876276900803,0.06434218729009747,0.0,0.0,0.08231743711973975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391674143033334,0.0,0.04705505015563512,0.0,0.1023716057554405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28762640951117785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073684155451435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18800814144147868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04949716342534968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723061869147942,0.308007190762779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563160304845626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011883766671437,0.0,0.1809640460008624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188872574277146,0.0,0.0,0.06678177947239915,0.06946339239740666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610301219236707,0.06849820705141668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597687718316324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514018366487001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008929941305381,0.0,0.2702669983166058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567208455686333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.469785239919509,0.0,0.0924500450151404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15262293181651174,0.069336149771498,0.08907621872495136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192572720132083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488484476709687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848803842195738,0.0,0.05251740809286852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06114796951278846,0.0,0.08798005335624852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919346204437404,0.0,0.05312245030504156,0.0,0.07224441090158429,0.0,0.08097891570478348,0.0,0.08126931691475622,0.0,0.0,0.08681908614791775,0.0,0.0655681208815972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094383794708778,0.057998666691862565
mentalhealth,Thatcanadianguy300,2020/01/25,"I need weed to stop my self from possibly going insane I have huge anger problems and depression often mixed with suicidal thoughts, before I started smoking weed I had 3 nervous breakdowns that I can remember, I attempted suicide countless times and I flew into blind rages at school in front of my classmates at the drop of a hat. The medication I was but on didn't help but As soon as I started smoking weed all of those problems almost entirely went away, I thought it cured it but now that I don't always have some (or I get alot of stuff that is no good) and I realized if I go long enough without it all those problems come back in full swing. It's been three weeks now and I've been flying into blind rages at random without anything to provoke it and I've just had a negative outlook on almost everything including myself and life in general. I feel horrible knowing weed is the only thing making me normal and happy and I can't always have it on me so now I'm stuck with extreme mood swings and I have no idea how to cope with it. (And I already considered seeing a doctor about a possible prescription but the only two doctors in town are South African hardcore old school Christian's who still think weed is pure evil.)",5.89283540802213,6.43821565560166,6.197161825726145,79.24849515905949,66.71784232365145,9.082268326417704,33.49405255878285,9.029198982220553,2.8868653388658365,987,42,182,16,15,317,146,241,0.23,0.732,0.038,-0.9922,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,1,11,12,4,1,9,0,17,6,0,3,3,52,35,20,2,6,9,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,15,16,0,1,8,0,0,6,8,9,0,2,11,4,23,2,29,24,6,37,1,1,3,0,3,17,0,8,13,129,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368046953093497,0.0,0.13048305854875564,0.0,0.19677373982409252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730314427960857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110923119717718,0.09092084902159127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061528802536196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185506877519153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184171696839628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420515269034913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12217566081627915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626834335992674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978674063253455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06177659848631915,0.0,0.1343993803903373,0.09917583382018964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587087645685816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925516345801133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348089844700045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498274640077847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351786705223847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046405063001623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892749627759238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11911644037694186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767499265271217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158521181294349,0.0,0.0,0.12407515632959075,0.0,0.0,0.17985683662230098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666003232540322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394250606150764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394520926599174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393345640124959,0.09422361662543208,0.0,0.12335226100202593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16738468380880378,0.0,0.0944282655199849,0.09885566052527052,0.0,0.0,0.1353588747878861,0.2586752543926023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855477368290308,0.07576474058308676,0.0,0.1877419830331879,0.06894789873912771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155053158591313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948466519616143,0.0,0.0,0.10961157849021744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279622615710577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kittyroselangdon,2020/01/25,"why am i attracted to a serial killer & is it bad for my mental health?? I've only just joined reddit so I'm not 100% sure what I'm doing or if this is even allowed, if not just delete but I'm saying this anyway.

So recently I started researching serial killers and became apsaloutley drawn to Jeffrey Dahmer. He's a serial killer who murdered and dismembered 17 males.

I.. have read a lot of posts about it being disgusting to glorify & sexualise serial killers, and I totally understand. I'm not trying to excuse the acts of what he did, but it kind of excites me which actually scares me. I've seen his Polaroids and I've watched his interviews. It's like having two sides or people inside of me. Which I don't understand and is why I'm posting this.

One side is going ""oh my god, i just want to hug him, and talk to him and he's so handsome and I'm gonna act on these dirty thoughts about him"" and the other side of me is like ""... stop, he's killed.. like literally KILLED seventeen people."" Despite telling myself this everyday I still get obsessive thoughts about him daily, from when I wake up until I go to sleep. I hate it but I'm still sexually attracted to him. 

So he killed 17 people. 17 people who had families that loved them. But I feel nothing. Ive seen a video of one of the victims family members getting visibly upset at the trial but i didnt feel anything, i felt bad for him instead which baffles me. When I looked at the Polaroids...I just can't get my head around the fact they where a son, a person, a living thing at one time on this earth which only prolongs my problem. I don't really have emotions, I lost a lot of people the last few years and I lack empathy. When someone dies I'm just like ""get on with it,  they are dead and there is nothing you can so about it"" and I've never felt truly upset about loosing anyone. I've never felt fear or upset for loosing anyone. I didn't cry when people I love died. I just went about like a normal day and cringed at all my other family members. I hate crying. I hate it. Hate. Which is probably why what Jeffrey Dahmer did dosent disgust me
... It does disgust me, like a literal dead bod... but it also dosent. The fact that he DID SOMETHING SO BAD makes me feel so attached and attracted to him LIKE... why.

I opened up about my desires to people around me, friends. And all I got back was, ""oh my God nah its fine lol"" and ""oooh! Ted bundy was so hot he could murder me!!!"" And I just- I don't think that makes it any better?!?! 

I've always been attracted to ""dangerous"" or ""horrible"" kinds of men. I hate it. Some examples are only fictional characters. Pennywise (yeah, oh god what?) and Michael Langdon from AHS. Pennywise is a murdering child eating clown and Michael is literally Satan himself. And those i was fine with. I have pictures of them in my room, I read faction on them and I have merch. But it's got to a point where I like someone who actually killed people. A murder. A psychopath. A disgusting person. 

Why can't I see it? Why? Why do I keep getting all these thoughts about him? Do I need a therapist? Am I crazy or normal? Is this disgusting? Maybe I'm just disgusting and deranged.

Help lmao",1.262900503026685,3.7272907287066235,3.106240941256715,88.0521681302754,84.93059936908517,6.392326711569615,22.763151163782076,7.681894048564974,1.274894773637992,2478,90,496,47,74,825,265,634,0.258,0.607,0.135,-0.9989,1,0,1,0,0,0,114.0,0,1,5,2,40,56,21,6,24,3,41,8,3,3,9,89,91,50,12,10,25,1,7,8,1,1,1,1,1,5,42,27,1,2,12,3,0,5,12,32,1,4,22,13,73,24,51,66,9,46,1,1,5,3,42,21,0,10,26,314,115,4,0.0,0.0,0.1160648436415007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04755672838530835,0.04948233785686256,0.12886762189767428,0.0,0.040440441043444915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316314932856797,0.0,0.04893729279204482,0.10587867950807574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0457274042109589,0.14896048403841794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05259482381174439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04748054901051689,0.0,0.13064613389998045,0.03835209377863659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343728428954287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05204105575970505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608508536616672,0.0,0.06689376346239558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03927821029277883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818408654111144,0.06691830082267533,0.09020678375024108,0.0,0.17129650282623884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04594501310541438,0.0,0.1553484992804672,0.0,0.06759434012051438,0.0,0.09512436479502484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935628660302132,0.06103156870063293,0.06321195605671705,0.0,0.0,0.039860306346121664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05285810227041006,0.26317117725706457,0.123854037164889,0.0,0.04847455103086625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23242541755706364,0.0,0.05251154359857351,0.0,0.04993834240062602,0.0,0.06491660659148624,0.1011155385632298,0.10734481304911564,0.0,0.07939102119003187,0.0,0.05974383807258307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059929996752047125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04409494490390598,0.09173114238047453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653249373292557,0.114122756317291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12089165120922668,0.1356848240557996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3298223074355657,0.1038507431227852,0.0,0.0,0.056216706674647815,0.0,0.11390826679045628,0.0,0.0641168186091377,0.056903072335620176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118968661754416,0.0,0.03809687598759227,0.0,0.05871771065168858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04729152968021298,0.05953808048337422,0.0,0.04738848624946719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951118517768698,0.0,0.1007744900284238,0.045781554911797286,0.0,0.0,0.04209192488639807,0.0,0.09498282325425056,0.049718109718783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056048110468944964,0.0,0.0,0.04779831702927721,0.05197786111729008,0.0,0.0,0.06904720774782061,0.03950805483619578,0.038104845641713236,0.0,0.14163341474330393,0.03467640776640404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04037502995508701,0.0,0.05809182738219594,0.12381706588508005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03507590749853283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05512765234553788,0.37562584525779735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03829559548251747
mentalhealth,craig-miller,2020/01/25,"SEEKING PARTICIPANTS FOR A STUDY ON FAILED PSYCHOTHERAPY My name is Craig Miller, and I am a counseling psychology doctoral student at Marquette University. I am seeking participants for a study examining client perspectives on failure in psychotherapy or counseling. 

Very little is known about how clients experience failure in therapy, and I am hoping this study will make a meaningful contribution in improving client care. Participants will be asked to describe their experience of failed therapy and what factors may have contributed to the failed course of therapy. 

Participation in the study includes completing a demographic form and participating in a recorded telephone interview lasting approximately 45-60 minutes. All information shared will be kept confidential. This study has been approved by the Institutional Review Board of Marquette University.

To participate, you need to be at least 18 years of age and have had a previous course of individual counseling/therapy, lasting at least 3 sessions within a 2-month period, that you consider to be a failure. 

If you are interested in participating or have further questions about the study, please email me at: [craig.miller@marquette.edu](mailto:craig.miller@marquette.edu)

Thank you for considering this request!",12.818437499999995,15.117910635416667,11.422916666666666,41.66374999999999,52.02083333333334,15.15,49.33333333333334,13.816669648895859,8.244470833333335,1070,64,124,42,12,338,113,192,0.099,0.784,0.11699999999999999,0.1429,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,4,1,4,3,8,0,0,13,0,20,1,0,2,1,21,27,9,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,10,5,29,16,4,20,0,3,0,0,14,15,0,6,5,90,15,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487537726113359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622313205507995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683210813175398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628639299670981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112957093922488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15803999390207554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25940467830711034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594779541349216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621244485152463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700640289704038,0.0,0.0,0.11798391892772812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17466369013125707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17824848235427695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649439937022515,0.7278608192425505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312889453096898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246672135649224
mentalhealth,StardustEcho,2020/01/25,"Just need to write it out I’m a student, in my third year of university. I’ve struggled in social situations for as long as I can remember but never thought of it as that unusual till I got to uni. Around this time last year it got really bad, I had no close friends, was miles away from everyone I knew and so lonely. I somehow managed to get the courage to go to the university counselling centre. 

I worked with a counsellor there for around 4 months. In some ways I felt it helped, but not enough. I was finding it too difficult to share my true feelings, petrified of being judged. My counsellor would never have judged, rationally I knew that, but I could never get the words I needed to speak out of my mouth. 

Now I’m back in my home country, living with my family again. I saw my GP back in November and started Sertraline (Zoloft) and an online therapy program to help with my social anxiety. I didn’t see a change until my dose was put up to 150mg when I felt a little better. I was able to make small talk with a cashier without freaking out and running it through my head for days after. I felt better for about a week, until Uni started up again. I have a group of friends at Uni, I really enjoy spending time with them and genuinely like them but I always feel a bit disconnected. They enjoy going out to pubs and nights out and given that they all know it is not my thing, I rarely get invited. During classes it’s great but then I get home and have no-one to speak to till classes the next day. 

I also have new classes this semester. I’m usually a high-achieving student but I’m struggling already. One of my lecturers just frankly terrifies me. She asks lots of questions to specific people in class and even though I was reassured that she would not ask me, I can’t shake the feeling she might. She also goes around and stares at your work and it stresses me out so much. While my Uni friends were probably aware I had a bit of anxiety before this (I’m not big on sharing it, but it can be obvious if you know me), they now are fully aware. I can’t breathe in this class, my heart starts racing, I go pale, I keep shaking and I’m always on the verge of tears. If the subject matter were not so difficult I likely would skip the class, but that is a sure-fire way to fail, one of my worst nightmares. 

Every night when I come him I feel really down and tired. I unloaded a bunch of this on my best friend (who lives somewhere else) the other night and though she reassured me that she didn’t mind and wanted to help me, I feel like such a bad friend. I’m feeling very vulnerable right now. I’ve never had this many people aware of my mental health and it scares me. I’m so tired of everything right now. I feel like a failure for being unable to keep up in classes, a loser for being so scared of a class, a bad friend for putting so much on my friend and lonely.

I know I could solve some of these problems by getting work done before deadlines and keeping on top of things but right now I have so little motivation. I get home, I nap and lie in bed till its night time then attempt to sleep for hours (when my thoughts turn more and more self-critical) till I eventually fall asleep and restart the cycle. 

I want to be someone different, someone who is more than just a member of my friend group, someone who is actually important to them and doesn’t always just feel like they are tagging along. I want to be less stressed about Uni, I want to be able to go to this class without feeling like I’m dying a little every time and even if I have to feel like that, I wish it wasn’t obvious so I wouldn’t make anybody worry about me or even worse feel pity for me.

Just had to get this all off my chest. I’m so tired.",4.373589403973512,5.027116564238413,5.099794701986756,85.39432781456955,70.11258278145695,8.318145695364239,27.947682119205297,8.426882951386363,1.7544749668874169,2926,97,615,43,50,947,311,755,0.149,0.6940000000000001,0.157,0.1006,1,4,0,0,0,0,75.0,0,2,7,11,43,48,0,8,30,0,46,13,7,3,9,127,112,64,1,17,25,0,14,7,8,5,6,2,4,0,36,40,0,3,25,2,1,11,19,21,0,3,26,19,92,27,108,72,17,105,0,5,3,0,45,43,0,10,56,416,128,19,0.1015327695911602,0.0,0.04954066842143931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05602196800805067,0.0811957191592715,0.12672509688065087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767229082982621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557853669999395,0.0949194336513254,0.0,0.04769668964264431,0.07807243257176033,0.1271634323729995,0.0,0.0,0.08639690868024008,0.0,0.053276188805916926,0.08979748373037863,0.1108474876367755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053704103731320466,0.04373074533847978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106565472188669,0.0,0.0,0.06548023678984259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0526874924393093,0.05304006703716939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05195163735820938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04240880029649114,0.0,0.0,0.0524552462038936,0.0,0.10059215510490792,0.0,0.08554573745299725,0.04850945621780249,0.04562555321887903,0.0,0.04785802949272887,0.0,0.2823591046301969,0.18133757720782867,0.14623107190802254,0.0,0.04639955599255406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137758636928225,0.0,0.18566338525299972,0.0,0.11540682556449952,0.0,0.08120503103706983,0.05597011845820928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052100956902633284,0.053962293094524535,0.0,0.060158410413375135,0.10208291285703956,0.053637472804466964,0.1527684695639254,0.0,0.049994662914169125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353704861423818,0.0,0.0,0.08369963228397359,0.041381379307516786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736132391138276,0.15264376311897224,0.08965529571556481,0.04492665301912347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04315976493010212,0.0,0.0,0.0677739121169763,0.05146914608355038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05116057549281016,0.05385511172284477,0.05125957677400242,0.0,0.04052124400426951,0.0,0.07463826815970258,0.07528526213479321,0.15661666241080438,0.049030490780938026,0.05399062616217803,0.19056325248572806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688012323637005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039003826657854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054734749150467055,0.048576574099345175,0.0,0.10206847697825062,0.0568699694040126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756673814287484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057508417658122125,0.13006264569783435,0.0,0.0,0.1016520148956166,0.0,0.04045423593608066,0.0,0.05296041107891484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706354353837416,0.05080304767154287,0.10349987227501173,0.1290425792824486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779812535438044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630544452325403,0.10614409590442624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04784671687434847,0.0,0.0,0.04080409710220916,0.0,0.0,0.0580557853480515,0.0,0.06745386055614075,0.0,0.0997554306132865,0.08060567773496252,0.11840914890701924,0.1750454738568826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055219248723220565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055912000631510535,0.04188758414227245,0.11977331625643492,0.08059198654004844,0.04072173170188879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837883711743029,0.09787396668054624,0.0,0.11087559826772124,0.051555728018871816,0.05173528320028516,0.10818894960012997,0.0,0.0,0.06538377473409525
mentalhealth,ZentechSSB,2020/01/25,"Mother is struggling with Depression and I do not know how to help Hi Everyone,

I wanna start off by saying my mother has always been a very giving person. Sometimes well beyond what is expected from her. The last few years she has fallen into a bad depressive state. She just recently recieved a diagnosis/meds. She feels very ashamed of this because she has always seen herself as strong and surpassing every obstacle that she has faced but she hates struggling with something se feels she has little control over.

I check in on her everyday, go to dinner with her when I can, and am always reassuring her. She feels like she is a burden to those who she reaches out to, including me. I reassure her that it is not burdensome but it doesn't hit her that way. I'm just afraid of her giving up. 

Any advice when talking to her? I never know how to handle the times she calls upset.",3.7950000000000017,6.056853738095239,4.722047619047622,81.15628571428573,74.11904761904762,7.575238095238094,25.485714285714288,8.447377352677275,1.9342471428571424,700,24,124,13,15,227,107,168,0.153,0.713,0.134,-0.5665,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,8,15,1,5,6,0,14,2,1,3,1,25,27,10,0,2,6,2,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,9,8,1,1,5,0,1,2,4,10,1,0,2,5,28,5,23,24,1,22,0,2,1,0,33,9,0,0,10,96,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509026310969614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854826998570719,0.0,0.0,0.1050145100387968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893868812847753,0.09413623903091728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576855129545152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732011224323279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660125959907209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301099886540337,0.1475600067526331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23424623849998225,0.11032147627939534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962776681116995,0.08776346555575212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246302832666475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350803386237582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16973622970282454,0.12587724303966782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544440885021629,0.15477473515989612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191023233653147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483822906985812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247636908960996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280520909793052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188841524431386,0.1527305857168983,0.0,0.1093030331639131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3228777382720123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12412121910629485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004664334848328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548341161003108,0.0,0.12257562757107715,0.0,0.0,0.1388469044077922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994448401766974
mentalhealth,KrombopulosJD,2020/01/25,"Depressed? ‘Exploratory study on the role of emotion regulation in perceived valence, humour, and beneficial use of depressive internet memes in depression’ (TL;DR Memes are (probably) a good thing!) \*subject to Mod approval\*

Depressed? ‘Exploratory study on the role of emotion regulation in perceived valence, humour, and beneficial use of depressive internet memes in depression’ (TL;DR Memes are (probably) a good thing!) [https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-020-57953-4#disqus\_thread](https://www.nature.com/articles/s41598-020-57953-4#disqus_thread)",18.656666666666666,25.33726133333333,11.332698412698411,29.84285714285716,46.77777777777778,13.758730158730161,48.682539682539684,11.765960540728905,8.926149206349207,476,25,34,16,7,125,31,63,0.145,0.625,0.23,0.7872,0,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,0,1,0,10,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,2,0,6,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,4,11,4,0,6,0,6,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,21,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7792473173502041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33923520239022803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529497235215665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3251526123166257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20035534382716189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604669808933719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dex507,2020/01/25,"My girlfriend cries during movies, but for feeling sorry for herself? I might be reading into things too much so I would like other peoples opinion on this..

This thing has recently been on my mind about my girlfriend of one and a half years. She will cry during movies, a lot - but it always seems to be about herself. For example we watched Her, and she cried a lot at the end and said that main character is so lonely and she doesn't wanna be alone like that when her parents die. Or we watch Togo and she cries again, this time she said it reminded her of her pet cat dying... and on and on, always in the end she connects it to her.

I'm very emotional too, and movies often leave me teary eyed, but I always feel for the characters, I feel sad for them, or like I wanna help them or something..  

This thing is just one of the plenty of things kinda making me worry, although I keep telling myself I'm probably imagining it. 

She gets very very sad if someone says or thinks something bad about her, and she has incredibly low self esteem. Yet she hurt me in the past and seemed to be fine with it until I reacted hurt. Is this some sort of empathy disorder or just nothing out of the ordinary?",4.605381355932206,5.488451105932209,5.112500000000002,84.67985169491527,69.72033898305085,8.103389830508474,27.46186440677966,8.278499904357787,1.7147593220338986,935,30,187,13,16,299,128,236,0.209,0.7090000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.9903,1,3,2,0,0,0,28.0,2,0,2,0,13,11,0,0,9,0,14,1,1,2,0,48,27,24,2,4,11,1,3,3,2,3,0,3,1,1,17,15,0,1,7,1,0,0,1,7,0,3,3,9,35,4,30,17,5,20,0,6,3,0,30,10,0,16,13,143,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072864545961723,0.0,0.0,0.25858181320721463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649207806519832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4551484516905497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21501703551474194,0.0,0.1187214057261992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652312991891668,0.1834973444347076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571323878107985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05412072046011436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943319398658064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22178728256525326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207422634525228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968527396145326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182433902275266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761344918715463,0.0,0.0,0.06914613409157308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989103802292392,0.10459486425912366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07614947311328141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939596811995803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403885090910747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502278029796467,0.0,0.0988869530618558,0.07181522908536134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168593300898748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361654145593373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228115556174816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19707278705267792,0.08237774004282968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18860617604288207,0.10806540663277434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777020746258128,0.15949499010849438,0.0,0.1159588548357652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905409226568952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752784097195935,0.06637533380440801,0.0,0.0,0.060403292596289036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564141056111288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10519915912862393,0.0,0.0735863046473816,0.0,0.0,0.06670760347098967
mentalhealth,diirtnap,2020/01/26,"Removing regret is the key to recovering or improving. However, it's so difficult to stop regretting poor decisions.

I made some poor decisions over the past couple of years, and they lead to depression and anxiety and panic attacks, and the thing that gets me is that the things I did were soo easily avoidable, and so unnecessary and useless.
I feel like I wasted my life for months, depressed, ill, and anxious, and stressed, for nothing. 
Has anyone else learned to move on and have any ideas how to remove regret and the ""I've messed up my whole life over nothing"" thinking?",9.704285714285714,8.549625142857142,9.007619047619054,67.88571428571431,59.47619047619048,12.971428571428573,41.0,11.979248473330829,5.012485714285715,460,21,78,12,5,146,73,105,0.373,0.5710000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.9907,1,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,1,3,13,1,3,5,0,6,3,0,3,0,26,10,14,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,10,0,2,6,0,2,4,0,12,0,0,3,1,8,1,12,7,2,12,0,6,0,0,1,4,0,2,5,52,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611590978103618,0.0,0.1418727364185842,0.20951161195110427,0.0,0.12967460254156374,0.1900207899541663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21098208702318244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052026745738682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3194646201195509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492404001510576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377173202159306,0.13248924690714442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689269856788799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093563707729919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619850142483185,0.0906040532543773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17548221418884166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802858802159335,0.1971095502169532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3558985725257711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175917432330576,0.0,0.0,0.17703799309879029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15504886885485772,0.21243832901807055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464164163785023,0.1188322172354145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20705413121035465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942708190782915
mentalhealth,Trash-panduh,2020/01/26,"I'm 31 and have struggled with mental illness since preteen. I guess this is just a vent, I'm not looking for advice or pity, just wanted to have a place to type how I feel. 

For most of my life I've struggled a lot with extreme anxiety, depression, BPD, and issues with explosive anger. I've tried therapy but really never connected with anyone, it feels to fake to pay someone to listen to me knowing I'm just a name on a sheet and only matter for that hour I'm there. Tried a bunch of different medications but I absolutely hate not feeling like myself, being drowsy often, oversleeping, it makes my anxiety and depression worse because I hate that feeling of being unproductive. 

My whole life I've had these periods where I would shut myself off for a few months or whatever or get sucked into some pathetic relationship and devote my whole existence to that basically pushing everyone away. I still managed to keep 1 or 2 friends but the past year I had a falling out with my only friend, in fairness she was a really toxic person but I dealt with it because she dealt with my trashyness. For the year following I couldn't even force myself to leave the house, I didn't text anyone, didn't call, wouldn't even shop for myself. I slept a lot, played a lot of games and checked out of my life. 

The past 2-3 month's I've been trying so hard to get my life together, go out again but I have no one, not even casual acquaintances. I don't understand how to make friends and I usually find it really defeating anyway, never anything in common because I lack a personality, I do have an advanced degree but never really used it and the whole brain fog with depression kinda blocked all those things out so I always feel stupid chatting with someone going for the same thing like I can't convey my thoughts ever and it's just a nagging feeling they think I'm a complete moron. Even on dates I've resorted to playing dumb af because it's easy, or when they bring up hobbies/ interests/anything I have nothing. What do I say? Oh hey, I stay at home 24/7 and chill with my pets because even my job doesn't require me to interact with anyone or even leave my home. 

Maybe it's just the usual nihilistic dread setting in, but what's the point? What am I living for anymore? I can't think of anything I enjoy anymore. Keep trying to force myself to do new things hoping I find something I'll like but it's been really hard with no support, I don't want to be consumed by my mental illness and waste my life and I'm doing my best here, hopefully this passes. Thanks for reading if you did.",4.307458557811849,5.771591994094488,5.326046415250726,80.68809987567344,70.98818897637796,8.3394944053046,28.722751761293,8.841846274778883,2.320849606299213,2055,78,385,38,38,676,245,508,0.22399999999999998,0.6809999999999999,0.095,-0.9962,2,0,1,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,2,4,25,33,8,3,23,0,30,10,2,5,5,98,71,32,0,9,23,0,8,3,3,2,8,2,3,2,22,29,0,4,13,7,3,8,17,17,0,1,10,11,53,16,58,55,14,48,0,5,1,0,19,18,2,17,23,260,75,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530846356791728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055610434968717835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225417027216097,0.0,0.1325608146793366,0.14019362588247364,0.0,0.16499366781513256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627918318364382,0.0,0.0,0.20370397429389853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07013714187402466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417386187506147,0.07460776465953306,0.0682439961657214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07007316056255458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17268957281504535,0.0,0.0,0.06982629182327267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26485551658767514,0.060454302035490674,0.0,0.06386182437663288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20275672891572,0.047745530094318034,0.0,0.0,0.12216835755263655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15490509992634804,0.0,0.06983499964544393,0.0,0.07596550240610636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362411753465295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973853534212825,0.13196756157986994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13407795694891073,0.13276055780892512,0.06581707221079756,0.07711634362078648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975631971212494,0.06632146991993584,0.11880853598233175,0.0,0.0,0.036729685536694964,0.0,0.0,0.14153305800601165,0.0,0.0,0.2360307284186643,0.09795372799626327,0.0,0.05901479006191442,0.0,0.056122912998752585,0.0,0.0,0.17045715678986026,0.0,0.0,0.08922313318662388,0.0,0.0671427617572887,0.0,0.0,0.06732724668656258,0.1347039501931286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669097408573566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15463725893606212,0.06454775698358109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412809492744469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04528779088327608,0.10165906208425038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759937918977102,0.0,0.11671204811681556,0.06982629182327267,0.0,0.06317881583787012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06685111611891839,0.0,0.21407475236393755,0.0,0.0,0.07175366281972112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05314830805812341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05528497317504767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132548191324826,0.05145133177728788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712351177242041,0.05337294421097338,0.0,0.0,0.1397367882424805,0.0,0.0,0.07584133060902534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06153087486299605,0.07642939453491808,0.0,0.13320268661704512,0.08564781424358851,0.0,0.05305796061861971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815009617510229,0.0,0.0,0.06957554138142609,0.0,0.05772227977101445,0.1472142812256602,0.0,0.07883970553527117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22385007425814946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810856743018848,0.047476267086528016,0.0,0.0,0.0860765604215893
mentalhealth,marukobe,2020/01/26,"Anyone else suffer from eye contact phobia? I have had it for most of my adult life.   It really hinders my chances of making friends and any socializing. 
I used to drink alcohol, and it went away if I had a few drinks.   

I quit drinking about 10 years ago, and have not really made any new friends friends since.   It’s been a constant struggle at work or anytime really. I dread running into people at the school I work in.   I sometimes choose to keep to myself so I don’t have to make small talk with people.   I’m sure everyone thinks I’m a bit strange. 

I just sometimes can’t look at people in the eyes.  I start to see it in their eyes, that I must be staring too hard or I’m making them uncomfortable.  It really sucks.   I really miss drinking for that reason only.",1.7602696078431386,4.086479777777779,3.2557148692810465,88.7525919117647,81.2875816993464,6.177941176470588,22.6343954248366,7.413659706084162,0.9714316993464052,598,20,121,9,16,196,96,153,0.146,0.7659999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.7769,0,0,5,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,3,4,9,1,2,5,0,10,9,3,6,2,22,26,7,0,2,5,0,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,1,8,5,5,1,3,4,0,2,3,5,0,0,5,7,17,4,20,19,3,16,0,2,6,0,9,9,1,4,5,72,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10457120896903993,0.12607154763048414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604441022449784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248572771222272,0.12087180398179312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083449573707677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879012661037514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748112697575772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4622535671096804,0.0,0.0,0.09854683901319483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272315036247167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734245543617851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567584824973723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485507262443504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332404390074405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906311982927196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162384811072956,0.23623297853247746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393389692579467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971971794485553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24535175673537302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254731227051634,0.0,0.0,0.37786550470610497,0.12129039748928165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938956550619992,0.0940049482259132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758406379440003,0.0,0.0,0.12025316891380808,0.0,0.0,0.2333460557178659,0.0,0.08349811384235484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332540720516524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118311935639587,0.0,0.0,0.0948179330727938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558891041272588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188617825132956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093571986511111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17176371659641645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596730251443823
mentalhealth,aloe-ha,2020/01/26,"I feel incredibly depressed today for no reason Today at church I felt like I just wanted to go home really bad. I also didn't feel like talking at all. I just thought my social battery had died really quickly for some reason (I am an introvert) but after a while I noticed it was sadness I was feeling. Deep, oppressive, suffocating sadness. I can't think of any reason I feel this way, but it sucks. Tears are coming out if my eyes as I type this and I just don't get it. The only thing that made it go away was playing video games, but I didn't feel happy, I just didn't feel as numb. But if I thought about my mood at all I would feel the nagging sadness again. 

I have been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (and take medication for it) but this is a brand new feeling for me.",3.5314150943396214,4.856934421383649,5.088191823899376,82.18247641509437,72.71069182389937,8.067295597484277,27.715408805031448,8.59863814320734,2.0050540880503145,619,23,124,11,12,209,94,159,0.249,0.682,0.069,-0.9857,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,8,13,2,0,5,0,15,4,1,4,2,38,35,13,1,4,11,0,9,2,0,1,3,0,1,0,10,5,0,0,15,3,0,3,6,8,0,0,12,10,21,4,16,22,3,17,1,4,1,0,3,6,1,3,9,88,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057386964119097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991618354423156,0.0,0.10115024369156947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422787403566594,0.0,0.11040069361300092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138984186134656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388348808818202,0.1342035757939616,0.13722661306359682,0.0,0.15153902914672485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5348474293118505,0.09446014752003268,0.1269548286418081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908106743750549,0.0,0.15029077171285096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407538569294937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326304637058151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12919497145786651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511261273178914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320077589602836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770181071844228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15053677764631734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056156023670612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941089688325378,0.4078418398756838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478471139213055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941525106460296,0.10627585002084212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784309514108933,0.08472316834932908,0.0,0.2099406070996096,0.0,0.0,0.25066391341359984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798855935399815,0.10495247392630336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392743538159193,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skitariimarch,2020/01/26,"A statement of my mental health I find the state of my mental health really hard to summarise. For as long as i have lived i have not been formally diagnosed with any mental conditions. That being said, i have been dealing with mind space that i personally don't understand. For that reason this post will be very disjointed as I struggle to summarise my mind. 

Upon reflection, from the age of 6 until the presrnt day (im now 19), i have noticed that i don't behave like the people around me and that i don't truly understand the people around me. For example I struggle to emphasize with others problem ls, while completely hiding my own. 

In social groups, I often take one of two propositions: either the talkative outgoing type, or almost completely silent. I often appear miserable and disinterested when im silent. I say this to plance emphasis on how I often struggle to communicate or interact with people. 

I feel i have these problems because i stuggle to understand concepts that seem so trivial to others, the sort of concepts that make or break relationships. See, im the introverted type, to point where im pretty much reclusive, so my interaction ms are very limited and my friendship circle is small and even growing smaller, as people just seem to drift out of my life. 

As far as these concepts go, the one that has caused me the most stress is the concept of love and romance. While a part of me may desire such relations and overwhelming portion of mind conflicts with idea, to the point where a romantic relationship feels fundamentally wrong, to the point where i believe i don't belong in one and should avoid for as long as i draw breath. 

It's conepts like that where i feel my own mind is fighting against itself and it's honestly just horrible, but yet remains a small portion of what i feel is wrong with my own mental health.",9.020059849521203,8.119530229651165,8.69827633378933,68.74152530779756,60.656976744186046,11.931326949384403,38.54924760601915,11.088447113337141,4.3349400136798915,1485,63,253,33,17,478,174,344,0.11800000000000001,0.8290000000000001,0.053,-0.9292,0,1,0,0,2,0,32.0,0,0,0,1,19,17,1,7,17,0,22,7,1,4,0,61,38,27,0,4,8,0,5,2,0,3,5,2,0,1,19,17,0,3,14,0,0,4,5,12,0,4,3,8,35,5,49,30,9,35,0,2,1,1,12,18,0,13,12,185,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872073432068605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05346033061989856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399665549151448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04792246766706238,0.0,0.0,0.0885712475892805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075840668925004,0.0,0.0,0.16485092070628668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050699635327137636,0.08104775615866609,0.0,0.07979172657821369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05192391710451498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589987434695158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185192612279953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044678243827688334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042285390264008,0.0,0.0,0.2506895560035212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874582769405018,0.3396671705140449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05552751236339242,0.07681382390043619,0.0,0.0694177513822144,0.139142131195942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095235669872993,0.0,0.0524755681634491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168983678463824,0.0,0.3175116006750267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05779045957471294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950275229894998,0.0,0.0,0.15981298611178985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513148398115596,0.0,0.2180046649637276,0.06864285995919144,0.0,0.0,0.2229473997546085,0.0,0.07529064280500074,0.07997887203505782,0.0,0.15044628504828594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0503622496029154,0.0808284587599898,0.0,0.16880439364969113,0.0,0.0,0.07478007704991871,0.0625171424196111,0.0,0.0,0.06264531437111215,0.14313477357791904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013724503761117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09005226482021997,0.24655379477726244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05910807132911122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679461989126023,0.2455203667842445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972984490351974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190450518008674,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,weatheredindv,2020/01/26,"Just if you have time - cold rushes I guess this is just another one of these posts, but I would be interested to hear your opinion. 

Background info: I'd say that I'm pretty depressed. Let me be clear though, I will not kill myself. Racially ambiguous (southern European white though), male,  mid 20s, in academia, live alone, no friends, no significant other, no sense of family, and arguably the worst Christian imaginable.


Recently, I've been reflecting on my life. It never occurred to me that one could live in any other context that the one I have been living. A fractured family, bullied, bully, sexually abused 10+ years, lied to constantly, shamed and guilted for sport, no sense of self, humilated on a school wide level (people wrote in other people's year books joking of my suicide. What a memory?), no core beliefs other than: hell is real, God is real, and anything involving abusing children is abhorrent. Politics? They don't care about you. Morals? Probably Biblical ones are best. Other than that, I stand for nothing and am the product of that. I get high almost every night to stop thinking. Weed, benzos, alchohol, cough syrup, whatever. I can't stop thinking.

Anyways, for the last six months, I've felt this immense sense of impending doom. Like I am standing on the edge of an abyss, looking down. I had an ex girlfriend that I was very close to but burned my bridge with her beyond repair. I guess you do really become the monster that you seek to destroy. I am utterly alone. The song Turn my Frown by Two: 22 describes the ironic tone and truth to me life, if you prefer an auditory description. I have been led on again, and humiliated yet again. My only ""friend"" basically told me that I am insignificant in comparison to his others. I didn't think I was insinuating that he was significant to me though? Either way, I was thrown off. If my life had a theme? Lifelong betrayal and humiliation. I never cease to be amazed in the ways I can be blindsided. I truly is comical. I have an unhealthy assumptive worldview. Even my body is disloyal. I have a nervous system disease that leaves me paralyzed occasionally and causes me many other pains and discomforts. Naturally icurable, of course. My family is so fucked that I could never talk to them. If I said, ""hey I'm depressed,"" they would then say that they would kill themselves due to their failure in raising me. My family has a suicide pact. If I die, three more follow. Though, if they died I don't know if I would follow through. Should I feel bad? I don't know.

With this in mind, I have been playing with fire. Loading guns and putting them to my head, packing up to drive out to fields (how serene right?), engaging in high risk behavior, just because. When I do this, it reminds me who I am. You know that scene where Bane tells Batman he was born into darkness? Well I am like that, but with immorality. Bad people, crazy people love me. They tell me things easily and are always trying to take advantage of me. But I know. I know their play. And if I don't, I learn it. Sorry for the rant. I'll get to the point. Recently when I've been on the verge of taking my life (of course I never would), I feel a cool rush throughout my body. It soothes me. Greater than any high, more potent that any benzodiazepine. I just stop thinking. It's a moment of clarity. Before recent, I only experienced this after I had beaten and bruised myself (though I was disappointed in how weak I actually am). What is this feeling? I've googled it and the only thing that comes close to capturing it is ""cold flashes"" attributed to menopause or anxiety. I am anxious, but the flashes aren't a bad thing. I've convinced myself that it's perhaps the presence of God, but surely there is a worldly explanation for it. The cold feels like smoke. As if someone released a plume of it originating in my chest or head and traveling up or down respectively. Any thoughts? Perhaps the context of my life has led me to some panic disorder, but none of them fully describe me. I have been going to counseling and they allude to C-PTSD, but I am no soldier. Yes, the classic American downplay of trauma. Really though, I don't feel like my life has been that bad. You know people are tortured and killed throughout the world. It's not like I was a filmed child sex slave either. I am just trying to discover who I actually am and what is going on. Humor me, please.

TL:DR Cold rushes in brain and chest when extremely emotional. Like cold smoke. What gives?",3.2574303683737647,5.786249792452833,4.321671159029652,82.05908805031449,77.01886792452831,7.292812219227314,26.36882300089848,8.306716005460428,2.0147280548068287,3536,138,644,69,84,1148,397,848,0.231,0.64,0.129,-0.9990000000000001,1,2,2,1,1,3,157.0,0,8,11,3,27,51,8,6,35,2,77,19,7,7,7,115,117,53,7,18,29,1,7,6,3,7,9,5,0,4,52,28,0,3,23,9,0,13,21,26,1,7,23,21,106,25,82,80,9,87,6,4,2,3,46,39,2,18,35,445,158,4,0.0,0.12947755058294774,0.1066403797229374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05471348419648935,0.11317991673815317,0.0,0.0,0.045464372613411255,0.0,0.0,0.14862671085334578,0.05729419357533989,0.041799004999186325,0.06172698952879749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044963585201352116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18248652601627208,0.03330768189581769,0.06034494406789283,0.046494120094277634,0.0,0.057340697910276864,0.0,0.0,0.12138415101818202,0.0,0.06099566051304549,0.0,0.0,0.05570852788923945,0.05612973311613073,0.0,0.04706702025889895,0.0,0.059045799543802215,0.0,0.08725025799499872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412170083223327,0.0,0.11341417827834185,0.0,0.06262150644135052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146199066756425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0360888200857543,0.0,0.04603606600571425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20603672096145967,0.0,0.1381366566437601,0.07806882186963637,0.052462409613671206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442855717913195,0.05051326123193529,0.05709368119713356,0.05241510827226732,0.06210568050940455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203829574363864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11215161210099373,0.0,0.061582594839488136,0.0,0.0,0.17318863419205668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18135126060337167,0.0,0.18017037019973767,0.04453841806565885,0.0,0.057855254053673,0.0,0.05587250654990331,0.2315606196803344,0.16016435731890935,0.0,0.14474282065513816,0.0,0.045883349593663116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04931420775529425,0.0,0.0,0.055395793569772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517023594751355,0.0,0.043612661931616684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856514942781267,0.0,0.0,0.0512753921521615,0.0,0.05242799493313826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481003340983567,0.12466721796174154,0.05814019281675245,0.06410758397121362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894004625049512,0.0,0.0,0.05997767274456583,0.05165191076356082,0.0,0.052329458443230524,0.05558793104389633,0.05891053370325066,0.0,0.06387055536179909,0.054927706314475626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438323890666032,0.07000682022410153,0.0,0.16184949974253915,0.0,0.0,0.046661764185996026,0.05197459855005231,0.0869029160691207,0.0,0.05529800778935123,0.0,0.0,0.05700082909351927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046295801320383065,0.0,0.0,0.06116435473966969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13704299940887246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953330929307557,0.0,0.051497004567749,0.0,0.0821640843281734,0.04391709425692861,0.09551451882974764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890000376496634,0.1400429305214089,0.3220977029275095,0.043377594385470494,0.03186068386960289,0.0,0.0,0.052210305149828766,0.0,0.07419315600914518,0.05943199637281445,0.05337477169203386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04508324191963585,0.0,0.0867404530571222,0.0,0.0,0.049127398458258614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940713733249827,0.0,0.0,0.07037198717271914
mentalhealth,notcymraeg,2020/01/26,"Idk what this , could someone maybe help? So I’m not fully concerned about this , it happens kind of often but only in certain situations.
Basically in situations there’s, well not a voice but more like, a thought telling me “what if you just did so n so right now” or along the lines of that.
So I’ve been like in the car with the window down and it’s like “what If you just threw your phone out the window like right now , why not do it , like go” and then I have to like grip my phone really hard and it makes me on edge. I’m not afraid of heights but similar things happen when I’m on a bridge , so the phone thing and as well it’s like “what happened if you just like jump off right now , why not” and like I get kinda stressed (I’m not depressed and the thought of killing myself has never ran over my mind so it’s not that).  As well as that a more serious one is when I’m near roads , I get this big impulse to just run across the road and some times I wait until there are no cars and like walk back and forth so it like get rid of the feeling and I like get this adrenaline rush when It like comes to it. Around roads I usually cross just like really quickly and my friends are confused to why I just randomly crossed instead of getting to the crossing and this is why. And I think the only other one I’ve experienced is recently with like large kitchen knifes i feel like “ what if I dropped it right no on my foot or like just stabbed myself “ and it’s got to times before I’ve like had to put the knife down because I get so anxious though I’d doubt I’d ever do that. Same happens with scissors.
In the moment it just feels like a really over whelming feeling of you should do this and usually goes when I get away from the thing or the area or safely do it , like run across the road when no cars are there. It’s never been dangerous except from maybe this one time when I was younger , was one of my first experiences of this , and I just felt an impulse and was waiting to cross but then I just like ran and this car was coming round the corner and it got really close like I missed it by a second. But apart from that it’s never got dangerous because I think I’ve learnt / am learning to avoid the impulse , sometimes though I do get scared I might just do it but I doubt.
I kinda just know what it is so I could like help it , you get me.",2.7916420297848887,3.936497675510207,3.5422118036403734,93.25433259790405,74.28571428571428,6.766685052399338,23.65140650854936,7.113659591113569,0.5771478212906782,1831,51,423,18,37,580,189,490,0.087,0.695,0.21899999999999997,0.9975,0,1,0,0,0,1,30.0,0,6,0,1,45,43,3,7,24,0,28,2,1,1,5,97,69,56,1,7,34,0,8,23,1,2,0,1,3,0,44,28,1,4,11,0,0,20,13,13,3,6,17,10,38,30,50,48,4,79,0,2,1,0,13,32,0,17,49,285,82,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647783976903268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052384320459233136,0.0,0.0,0.05528659777351713,0.04524799529206544,0.0,0.07174245033009677,0.0,0.05007256452038029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137911649545672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396552002738308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050682913539748686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05322846272459505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057561475764714265,0.0,0.0,0.1190147337065205,0.12611614475671834,0.0565002065841544,0.0,0.0,0.05005333067386017,0.0,0.0,0.04546332276148416,0.0,0.27669566890257324,0.0,0.0334428384501466,0.0,0.1411906126537072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081449404841501,0.0,0.05271335496863742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888481688437292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510301861110862,0.06127777190988156,0.03233954626303208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6612173836442385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03927934041987356,0.0,0.11823495999758918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06242500102578764,0.05941644219709578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615414116069904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594989542676076,0.08950819734205365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059155246143191086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15078986398408795,0.0,0.05810211056090803,0.0,0.0,0.20101244571144156,0.0,0.0,0.0589138795848092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228797230057704,0.0,0.0,0.04985898203766414,0.0,0.05819898145751527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740648437452826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051432922023663084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728154987628342,0.07541070419159772,0.1156293740584846,0.09343234753990684,0.10293857452227476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296183996326326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872554361916058,0.0,0.21239300616436946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kingofthebiscuits,2020/01/26,"Completely unable to concentrate, irritable and feeling worthless Since December I've been feeling like crap, I first started notising it when I started studying for my finals. I was absolutely unable to concentrate. It was so hard to start studying, I only lasted about 5 mins before I started thinking of something else or doing something else. After that, it was impossible to start again. Because of that I started feeling that I was absolutely worthless, questioning if I really wanted to study medicine and feeling that I was never going to be a good physician (bear in mind before this I didn't really question the fact that I loved medicine).  
All of this makes me super irritable (for example, being impatient towards my pets and hitting them when I get angry -- yes I know I'm shit. No need to tell me).
Now that I'm studying for my next final this is all coming again, but stronger than ever. For the love of God I just can't concentrate on anything.  
I've discussed it with my therapist and he's given me techniques to study but they've been of no use. I just don't know what to do.  
As a side note, my mum died on July. Before anyone tells me 'it's obviously that!', I don't really feel that it is. Doesn't mean it couldn't be, but at least consciouly that isn't the issue that making feel like this.  
If anyone actually took the time to read this, thank you. And if anyone has any advise or at least a 'this happens to me too!' that'd be great.",3.683205812574141,5.714690943060499,4.975538256227762,80.24428010083038,73.73309608540923,7.5303084223013075,28.07844009489917,8.344100000000001,2.1625621589561104,1149,46,208,20,24,381,145,281,0.09699999999999999,0.762,0.141,0.94,0,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,1,2,11,12,2,0,7,1,24,5,2,3,6,42,57,17,1,6,10,1,7,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,25,7,0,0,12,1,0,3,10,4,0,1,10,7,28,8,31,40,4,31,0,2,0,2,12,7,2,7,23,145,53,2,0.0,0.0,0.10012985108108728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977643207517738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152360739852732,0.0,0.0844370041063307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254841246344703,0.0,0.2619335752525379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883870395360264,0.10758172403549653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649010075731792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143034171810054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281411008334307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112877781084028,0.14660524518371054,0.0,0.22480240085853875,0.0,0.0872776538228866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05360804050766548,0.0,0.05831405098943668,0.08606207280887483,0.0,0.11312482864655878,0.0,0.0,0.0907352308826883,0.0,0.09191592017668353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709528550952672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278049574463868,0.08363858380640032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025741523993577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852140546216502,0.0,0.1369822399190465,0.0,0.0,0.11176934920231492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036040479954288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608195777688752,0.07913701804850995,0.0,0.10912394865980447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803741885662513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22988715125795356,0.0,0.10263499274233713,0.0,0.19719844870897416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053248427472694,0.08487775747061264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15798411066621273,0.0,0.0,0.4357555350982444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793664758387434,0.0944669477733086,0.0,0.1191348975700008,0.0,0.06574656717511486,0.0,0.0,0.05983109849183613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400040323973082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861969865739726,0.0,0.0,0.060520400220592976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Matt_314_,2020/01/26,"A girl is my only pillar of happiness and confidence and its crumbling I dont want to fall back to where I was. I dont know if this is the right thing for this sub but I'm not getting any other responses from any body its affecting my mental health and I just want to talk to someone. Sorry if it's not the right thing

Hey, I dont know where or who to talk to about this so why not people I never have to talk to. 

I'm 15 and I have never had a serious relationship I didnt have my first kiss until about 3 weeks ago. I met this girl at a party she was older then me (16) and in college I am still in high school year 10. We hit it of straight away and talked all night, I was quite drunk and very confident she clearly liked it. I got her insta and the next day I messaged her. We talked on snap every day and new years came around. Any time I had had something to drink I would send funny pickup lines and flirty comments which she clearly liked. We met again at a second party, by now I had a massive crush on her for obvious reasons. She was hot funny cool and older. We ended up kissing sleeping in the same bed snuggling holding hands making out. I was on top of the world, it couldn't get any better. We continued to talk over snap and played xbox games together all night, I thought I had finally found someone right for me.

I was depressed about 6 months I nearly did things o regret now. I have recovered and made sure that 2020 would be a new me. I thought that was actually happening I mean clearly I'm better if a girl likes me. I was losing weight finally and with my terrible body image getting better I was becoming more confident. 

We started to open up to each other and she told me about her mental health and past relationships and stuff like that. We were getting super close. 

But every now and again I got this vibe that se wasnt interested. I know that sounds stupid but it's been tiring me apart. Sometimes I would be ignored for hours or she just would give super dead replies or even air me. I've been an idiot and poordd all my self confidence into this crush and without its success I feel like sh*t. I feel like om jot good enough and it killing me. I feel like she only likes confident drunk me . I've been spending to much time alone recently just thinking about it and my minds been wandering to dark places. I dont want to go back to depression I finally started feeling better but my one pillar is crumbling. 

I want to talk to someone but I feel like an idiot talking to my friends about it and I'm not close enough with my parents

Sorry for the clumsy writing and spelling mistakes
I cant convey my emotions or the whole picture if I had years I cant find the words

I know this is just like any other post about a crush and hopefully one day I'll look back on it laughing but rn it's the only thing I can think about and its painful

I dont know why im putting this here but what have I got to lose?",2.378729179910998,4.1162160016528935,3.5755991735537203,90.14983232676417,76.58677685950413,6.505085823267642,23.86602034329308,7.321109707123232,0.8930184361093447,2311,74,492,28,52,750,263,605,0.147,0.6559999999999999,0.19699999999999998,0.9908,1,1,2,0,0,0,37.0,7,0,0,12,27,42,4,0,19,1,48,14,4,4,10,116,93,44,2,16,24,1,8,10,1,4,4,1,1,4,38,43,4,2,18,6,1,5,17,14,0,4,34,11,80,28,59,51,10,80,0,5,1,2,45,32,0,9,52,324,118,3,0.0,0.0,0.0534563357174734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04855821808399225,0.0,0.0,0.056734453134444925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862577611923908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04876486332578569,0.0,0.0,0.05146660986604537,0.12636485231686062,0.0,0.0,0.060499026678757936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937900553153664,0.0,0.12169408894579835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265250498254142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10598363825817904,0.0,0.09436202779959244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32100250190769714,0.053662498844353965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06161892550506067,0.04851787454116058,0.11320256026277455,0.0,0.03618096798161776,0.0,0.0923072256834398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384893698170112,0.1565363199858628,0.0,0.1800229274383375,0.050066951482759435,0.04659493161146715,0.0,0.06006227155389211,0.042322067010971236,0.0,0.11447892430052585,0.05254894312547859,0.03113212946070168,0.045945969228369465,0.13143514831504166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04844082869492647,0.05831319176927734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645488636553172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05787694927490306,0.0,0.05440783963866989,0.05394621368623222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059170646717766326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06060477213095587,0.0,0.1505253422884403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267622192051998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04600050648907219,0.12256722609466253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0518331499977206,0.03656536250370565,0.0,0.0,0.05967031598842549,0.0,0.0,0.11040855871291637,0.0,0.05531110564468773,0.0,0.043724020934777584,0.0,0.04026881799589522,0.0,0.08449777881033804,0.10581166783143536,0.058258015680567175,0.10281263379040584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423924408371994,0.12498553875446985,0.058288645895030675,0.0,0.06082552138358437,0.0,0.0522926889998663,0.03797681416744498,0.0,0.05723232488298845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05246307460124732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05506795674520341,0.0,0.058264137099158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05632186555787429,0.05408758681230485,0.11762414514109926,0.0,0.14034272597172667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05543920373455314,0.0,0.0,0.05714637296142516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05481849273203447,0.0,0.1392420340656122,0.042171498142748634,0.054177764483636384,0.12264105920857485,0.0775456200905067,0.0,0.043746525889921985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627087714439247,0.0,0.0,0.051628495167965714,0.0,0.0,0.3522338446931603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14557075349303236,0.07020025555292564,0.0,0.08697670635121885,0.06388407158889542,0.06296032407634512,0.0,0.05234361706610959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04519835584887283,0.12924013356727904,0.0,0.04394035507019916,0.06670598169747535,0.0,0.0,0.09885893170093303,0.061158721356938874,0.0,0.0528049356981615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15565352655442513,0.0,0.0,0.10582750871248453
mentalhealth,anonymous_49,2020/01/26,I need help Is there anyone on here who has existing mental health problems or is knowledgeable on the subject that I could talk to as I think I may need professional help but I would like to chat to someone to make sure I’m not wasting someone’s time,10.067647058823527,6.443023313725494,9.39421568627451,73.12897058823529,60.96078431372549,12.55294117647059,41.18627450980392,10.125756701596842,3.9325215686274495,203,8,41,3,2,65,38,51,0.035,0.722,0.243,0.8731,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,1,1,13,11,3,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,7,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,2,26,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18344058732875146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20946440502798028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788648202686595,0.0,0.0,0.35169413694749124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281705161812329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751200582627042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643861828601818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3890570598495988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510326531482338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44457507412406655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24726091751213014,0.0,0.0,0.2108662651659456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16810270705287286,0.0,0.0,0.152977867203865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18636527011214432,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnholyPizzaParty,2020/01/26,"Therapy makes me feel sick. I was wondering if it is normal to feel worse after therapy. For context, I have extremely bad anxiety and moderate depression. After therapy, I feel so wiped out  and cant do anything else all day. Sometimes I have panic attacks during these sessions, but even if I dont, I still end up being very exhausted. It's so bad I haven't gone to therapy in over a month. This has happened with all the counselors and therapists I've been to. My current therapist isnt bad, so I dont think  changing therapists would do anything.",3.8765303983228527,5.927586254716985,5.478805031446542,76.75980083857444,73.24528301886792,9.616771488469603,33.47589098532495,9.994966539143718,3.906225576519916,437,23,77,13,9,148,70,106,0.263,0.737,0.0,-0.9790000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,1,1,2,0,15,2,0,1,2,18,23,9,0,4,3,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,3,3,10,0,11,18,2,12,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,3,7,55,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944955756679528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032995698237085,0.0,0.0,0.14052646246322886,0.0,0.0,0.30941231725291346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067208765455526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966280644260333,0.0,0.1063911007350755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28953858083003664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318851046080686,0.0,0.10940566238621392,0.0,0.0,0.08158648344014206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873724442577408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092319274087223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245327609551653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859573441329887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102736223610105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492888173197851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221684640143914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864648209233123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.565042158402527,0.4302628986541132,0.0,0.07914923655542312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019202944724761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339565850402724,0.0,0.0,0.12588158057720705,0.08774795545191283,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Leitch93,2020/01/26,"Bad place I don’t even know what to say, this is kinda me just clutching at straws. How the hell do I shake the feeling that everyone would be better without me. I can’t get rid of it. I lost the love of my life and nothing makes any sense. Work seems pointless, bobbies seem pointless. My mates would be gutted but they would get over it. My dads probably the only reason I haven’t done anything stupid. If I can’t be with her what’s the fucking point. I don’t care how stupid I sound I just want it to go away. I don’t wanna hear “time is a great healer” I know it is. And I know it will get better. But I don’t think I’m gonna survive the journey there.",-0.37050124275062396,1.7334241619718331,1.3789146644573336,100.05394780447394,89.07042253521126,3.904556752278376,17.50787075393538,5.0885558068054335,-0.8048671085335544,509,13,121,2,17,165,86,142,0.12,0.731,0.149,0.6364,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,5,6,12,4,1,7,0,19,5,1,4,0,26,39,7,0,6,6,1,1,0,1,5,2,3,0,0,9,3,0,0,8,0,0,3,8,7,0,0,2,4,20,5,10,29,0,9,1,1,0,2,7,5,2,4,1,76,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102004273658636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335439576482772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15225251194907188,0.0,0.13530604990208098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866423763806114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652220800977005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16583472242867595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703334208893606,0.0,0.0,0.1548469425819567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193799625723866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981379708780568,0.2539953161187589,0.0,0.0920974768894322,0.0,0.0,0.1786621082761801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18264357007285945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671774364201371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446161148003635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689811497946076,0.0,0.14625760709203164,0.0,0.1081704877396729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549257369405362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232473007399344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16930909672892971,0.0,0.15319083918971665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747186882674176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16661570542849474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886968210722927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29505079815820884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383591687132993,0.0,0.0,0.09449340454188962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558204353981364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15621165109339008,0.0,0.1179752618514626,0.0,0.0,0.34534973947173303,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mittley,2020/01/26,What are you on? Who takes what for how long and why.,-2.729999999999997,-1.132513999999997,-1.4499999999999975,116.145,105.66666666666666,2.4000000000000004,6.0,3.1291,-3.1418,40,0,12,0,2,12,11,12,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6017672058266426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5112656909851686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6135826131932465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maggotmamman,2020/01/26,"6 months gone tw i have to vent because i have no one to talk to about this.
i just hurt myself for the first time in 6 months and i finally feel something. i was overwhelmed with anxiety and this frustration and rage and i just needed an outlet so i fucked up and relapsed.
but the thing is, i finally feel hunger and how actually exhausted i am. like i haven't felt hungry in weeks and ive just kinda been walking on autopilot with this underlying anxiety and now i feel almost like an eerie calm.
and i know it wont last, i know selfharm never solves anything. ive been doing it on and off for 10 years but i finally feel something and the fact that it wont last and theres nothing i can do about it kills me.",1.3886036036036025,3.5280275000000043,3.167459459459458,89.9270900900901,81.43243243243244,6.649369369369371,22.704504504504506,7.793537801064563,1.073760720720721,562,19,121,10,15,187,85,148,0.203,0.727,0.07,-0.9508,0,0,2,0,0,2,9.0,0,0,0,1,9,10,4,1,5,0,15,3,0,1,2,32,25,16,1,1,5,0,5,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,9,14,1,0,7,0,0,2,5,7,0,2,5,5,19,3,16,18,0,22,0,2,0,1,1,7,1,2,15,87,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.15457622049645214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15861540664537924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24235218329391595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035026841526273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655958829723088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.320368586105712,0.0,0.15208949963019985,0.5205606286446098,0.0,0.13473554305812566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643888227834306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957121106983342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17524689065041385,0.0,0.17410574958115832,0.2582354019881509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547731486385867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25286783354274833,0.0,0.0,0.1174521019870294,0.12216837455787175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15198973083229805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073364046464558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438891745229911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12731647173537425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523437768302944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236471415032273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705947616614027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200484876596898
mentalhealth,Heretoshareme,2020/01/26,"Struggling Hi, 
I’m 25 now, still battling the urge to do something Crazy like get a piercing, hook up with someone I know I don’t have a future with, shaving off my hair or hitting my head/hand against a wall when I’m anxious. Still battling suicidal thoughts, inability to commit to a relationship, walking around feeling people are starring at me, worthless tired, drinking, smoking & just anything that’ll make me feel the pain less. 
I can’t afford therapy now & this has been with me since I was a kid from cutting my wrists as a kid, mixing a poisonous drink but didn’t go through with that to telling myself I have 5 years to live. 
I can’t afford therapy right now so if there’s anyone I could talk to who can help me a bit till I can afford help.",5.705312729948492,5.838301503311262,5.801015452538634,83.35522442972777,67.0794701986755,8.03561442236939,34.65857247976453,7.3871296695380915,2.31309212656365,601,27,119,5,9,190,102,151,0.158,0.76,0.08199999999999999,-0.6956,3,0,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,10,8,4,1,10,0,15,7,2,1,1,16,25,7,1,2,4,0,3,1,0,1,3,0,0,2,4,5,2,0,4,2,0,2,4,7,0,0,4,3,16,1,19,18,2,17,0,1,0,0,9,6,0,2,10,76,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462396345704345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805040999993066,0.0,0.11172076433641984,0.0,0.13148399981058198,0.14223664083281226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744366181031256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757004200526542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130439851055441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16157750815151994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347761342976268,0.0,0.09080574033150113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16397872276208175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21419217177927616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781002380456092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805964994812509,0.0,0.14108724440291434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665331508498313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17001547067637296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077021667469823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17154219395560616,0.0,0.13644987084367166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321703341479867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353797101539167,0.1230052096042679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551984550481831,0.0,0.0,0.16703506336429713,0.0,0.1747716240382936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842381645282303,0.13965335414735472,0.0,0.3654410243602229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12684619312321194,0.0,0.18364175333655108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028920437132962
mentalhealth,dfj22,2020/01/26,"When do psychiatrist call it quits? Hello, 

My son(25m) has had bipolar depression for 5 yrs now and his doctors have tried all kinds of medication and treatments but nothing seems to help him for long, He has had countless times of suicidal intentions and has tried 4 times, He has also been hospitalized 15 times for it, 9 of which was in a state hospital, I love him and I want him to be happy but most importantly safe, When does the psychiatric system just say, you know what enough  is enough and just keep him in the hospital because I don't think holding him for 3 to 60 days is doing any good.",9.432051282051283,6.856227418803421,8.966769230769234,72.4532307692308,61.136752136752136,12.77880341880342,37.929914529914534,11.20814326018867,3.920727863247864,476,17,95,10,5,153,82,117,0.086,0.735,0.179,0.9234,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,6,6,0,0,3,0,15,4,0,1,1,19,21,10,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,5,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,1,11,5,12,16,4,12,0,1,0,1,14,2,0,2,8,62,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332103429069452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037840193120392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11687272934121705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19577090041287204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236456519404062,0.0,0.16513097640520372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962368966655756,0.16777833054476096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3962027892715891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16080838738814945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20409299203733824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850807033267878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17041245657357326,0.0,0.1996502884444137,0.10536609831491987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16966906579395993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17303774167438385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314102993236665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183963653816832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20392130336631384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246604402668096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17453766955312938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20971414564313748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228485336068573,0.0,0.0,0.33538615153392665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603350382758494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308335537272075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,POAperfucked,2020/01/26,"What can I do short of talking to a professional? 
First off I’m not a danger to myself or others. I just struggle sometimes. Long story short, one of my soldiers died. And   I spoke at his service and escorted his body home. It haunts me. Idk why. Maybe I’m just a bitch. But I find myself thinking of it all the time. Something will remind me of him or it. And I’m just overwhelmed by guilt of not preventing it, or the sadness of it, or the anger at nothing in particular. I keep thinking of how heavy his hands were when I readjusted them before viewing. I don’t know why. I’ve been in the back for dozens of 9lines and seen broken people. But they don’t stick with me like this. Maybe this is the wrong place for it. Maybe I just want to tell someone. It’s just so isolating",0.9083647798742156,3.2227105597484313,2.326698113207545,94.1144496855346,84.9119496855346,5.042767295597487,20.78301886792453,6.42735559955562,0.18784528301886816,605,19,131,6,18,195,96,159,0.172,0.774,0.054000000000000006,-0.9645,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,1,9,9,3,3,8,0,8,2,2,1,1,27,18,13,1,1,13,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,11,5,0,2,4,0,0,0,4,8,0,3,4,4,20,1,20,13,1,13,0,2,2,0,9,8,1,4,6,92,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361110710065585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15062391915756546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966200942495374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18371019803879654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16178548694689185,0.1505660615788477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17755716773451696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733613214098613,0.0,0.0,0.09728100105463294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647897540523627,0.0,0.0,0.15664978425136966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5334961338666699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984750016538533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994770900710545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271762491645667,0.0,0.18493955146211494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499814389706955,0.13627225465592696,0.17506909746037613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850510621824802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227529936210034,0.15471602789141026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268438998595159,0.0,0.0,0.10321694575031776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440608686482372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3194510536514788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935345061689296,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Quietter,2020/01/26,"I feel like I've made myself dumber by telling myself that I'm stupid. Over the years I've given myself a lot of abuse. Every time I was made to feel stupid, instead of being self compassionate I would beat myself up. I started believing that I was dumber than average. I think that those thoughts seeped poison into my self-image, tainting it so that my identity twisted. I was a stupid person.

Now I think differently. It doesn't really matter if I'm stupid or smart. I'm human like everyone else and as long as I continue to nurture the curiosity I lost to my self abuse, I'll be fine.",3.869743589743592,5.3924002478632485,5.4150427350427375,79.39384615384617,72.16239316239316,8.276923076923078,25.82051282051281,8.841846274778883,1.990394871794872,467,15,88,9,9,158,71,117,0.264,0.619,0.11699999999999999,-0.9638,1,0,0,0,2,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,3,12,5,0,4,0,7,1,0,2,0,14,20,6,0,2,2,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,4,7,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,8,2,17,6,12,9,1,9,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,3,8,54,24,0,0.0,0.4015349542480476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19090920962285526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17703648239254582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415515712247754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427667543457457,0.16191426540914264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17135540749945402,0.12105326628627107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655668945405739,0.0,0.0,0.14995562902668105,0.0,0.0,0.18497186874711302,0.14405813172822515,0.0,0.3206704800366829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14795494585138466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855235223857417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5303118231489322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199357516389538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14810450837095934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171501215712765,0.0,0.13452231910891713,0.09880614965523893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12037058109000963,0.0,0.0,0.10911857894484836
mentalhealth,AceHanded,2020/01/26,"I need help. I am a 17-year-old male from Finland that's been struggling with depression and social anxiety for the past 5 years. They have never really been too much for me to handle, at least until recently. 

About two weeks ago I experienced the absolute worst feeling in my entire life, feeling weak and exhausted because of my mental issues. It was the first time I actually realized how badly I am wasting my life away, never being able to do anything with other people and always being alone, with the exception of my best friend of 11 years who I sometimes play games with. Now that feeling and realization is stuck with me. It almost feels like I have two personalities, but one is keeping the other locked inside.

I'm absolutely tired of being alone and quiet. I don't wish to be the most popular person in the world, I just want to be able to socialize and take part in different events, just like a normal person would. 

I know I need medical help, but I don't want my parents to know about it. Seems stupid, I know, but I don't know how they would react or how I would even be able to tell about it. I would like to know what my options are at this point, please and thank you.

-Ace",6.59389897655992,6.345397085836911,6.998283261802572,76.81131726642458,65.26609442060087,10.087685704853088,30.369428854407396,9.661875296680813,2.607618289864643,943,29,181,17,13,308,132,233,0.134,0.72,0.146,0.2591,2,2,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,2,3,11,15,1,1,9,0,24,6,0,4,2,50,44,15,0,10,7,1,4,3,1,4,6,1,0,4,11,12,0,1,11,2,0,0,5,7,0,4,4,6,27,8,31,30,6,21,0,1,0,0,16,8,0,5,16,133,38,0,0.3026001457340468,0.0,0.09843136388021073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941225711506698,0.0,0.10100344515071946,0.20893499436759594,0.0,0.0,0.08392918734766305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716276107784151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300471224524704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476759930160428,0.0,0.08421949402379925,0.061487413402155335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585339466749293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687635403879912,0.0,0.0,0.1053842490447106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662151412246478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20400496773359614,0.07205920152492368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579717645934136,0.0,0.0,0.07792937398733603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521766609881056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527864472010978,0.0,0.08965497105508967,0.0,0.0,0.2771685440299206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249028792095558,0.14783514628189856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161260389237196,0.10164992486202476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414864157784598,0.14958278255284765,0.15558925806490084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882796490833808,0.0,0.0,0.1058426500414746,0.0,0.06834989670090509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11200055050825533,0.10922882322034597,0.09628869300777836,0.06992828004679406,0.26421877542324296,0.0,0.11072136363255516,0.09535164890982976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461780062559988,0.0,0.0995937126529274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182526926987132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056418274939584,0.0,0.0,0.09975976053222124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544779128558457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758392168464044,0.0,0.08816195500429116,0.09286451952672208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05881619280781119,0.1159314510805312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19706424857419072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898760403558345,0.0,0.08090919478281182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159917446071953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286611282009526,0.0,0.0,0.19486457271723906
mentalhealth,SoggyChickenWaffles,2020/01/26,"Honestly just disappointed and angry that this has got at my mental health so much So my ex girlfriend and I of about a year and a half broke up a little over a year ago. In my mind it honestly was a good thing for me because of the amount of mental abuse I endured and the manipulative nature she had that has driven me to have unidentifiable rage for the last year plus (never had this before though I have had bouts of depression and high stress). 

This last year for me has been a hellscape mentally and despite a great friend who’s been able to help me get through stuff I have continued to go through a patch of low confidence and high stress/anxiety and stretches of rage that makes me want to randomly hurt things and people (I’m honestly scared of myself sometimes.

The other night I met a girl off tinder (full disclosure I really don’t go into tinder with much confidence) but immediately I realized this girl that I’ve never met seemed to be the nicest and sweetest person I’ve met in awhile and I honestly fell in love, not a good thing I know but it was going so well and I haven’t had such a positive interaction with a woman in over a year so I think I just went too far in my mind. She really was just an awesome person to be with I was just too excited I think.

So after a good amount of talking we begin to make out and start to hookup for a bit (I didn’t start it but was definitely not gonna let it not happen). After about 10 minutes she gets a lot of texts from her friend who’s 5 floors above me in this dorm that her boyfriend had just broken up with her. She apologized to me and told me that she had to go (I completely understood though I was disappointed). She tells me that we should meet up next weekend (she lives an hour away) and to text her in the morning. 

I text her in the morning and she responds and seems happy that I actually followed through and responds immediately and I haven’t heard from her since. I’m still hoping it’s just a coincidence but it’s been too long for a coincidence, I’ve definitely been ghosted.

Being ghosted really isn’t the worst thing in the world but I’ve been in a bad mental state for a long time and this just feels like the last straw for my sanity. I’m honestly just hurt and disappointed but still just holding out a little hope that it is a coincidence. 

Thank you for anyone who read through this I know it’s trivial, but I’m just so broken already that it really hit so hard and I’m done with it.",3.973483033932137,5.099646263473055,5.052669660678641,83.6245533932136,71.39520958083833,8.60059880239521,25.89271457085828,8.998388855275968,1.7902499001996004,1962,60,411,38,36,646,205,501,0.113,0.7290000000000001,0.158,0.9823,1,0,0,0,1,0,29.0,2,1,0,1,28,33,2,2,34,0,35,2,0,3,2,76,76,39,2,4,20,1,2,1,3,2,1,1,1,5,36,33,0,1,9,2,0,8,10,14,1,1,28,3,53,19,65,41,8,66,0,8,0,1,43,31,0,6,27,289,89,2,0.08102953765817303,0.0960067520768832,0.07907314010304663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182779609143199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941810973289015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06198737452090471,0.0,0.0,0.056657736761186725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612991795912412,0.0,0.06765627933852539,0.049394854067444885,0.0,0.06895016843965572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846326865646705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495792858312662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697906220512398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292134987889231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040970968905164426,0.05788751789346599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520643958449126,0.0,0.08466917811112362,0.0,0.18420381431027136,0.2038911953019015,0.06480672345437763,0.08933535132753294,0.0,0.0,0.07165415254696479,0.08625744957525551,0.07258654991852033,0.0,0.0,0.08613060941863318,0.0,0.0,0.05431239106292536,0.17122431073237207,0.0,0.1609612282140157,0.07979777243590591,0.0,0.1734875919116677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906342958290189,0.1981496641792095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828581921746218,0.0,0.0395869391397415,0.16242576791366434,0.07155056628211483,0.14341718195327094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888841527329095,0.07313232134087005,0.0,0.10817569118300437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32663486243514345,0.0,0.16363346822020164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913206711370927,0.0,0.1249899495090552,0.0,0.08617583255952936,0.07604073200077767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05617567884190317,0.1415037336562998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105146540183861,0.0,0.2076383868148776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112470291296632,0.0,0.0,0.147532495654798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06702847088697865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014028466384612,0.0,0.11470624762239275,0.0,0.12942058688787564,0.0,0.18563812323441373,0.0,0.09275943447157313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512847302530528,0.07082338743468686,0.0746011116139264,0.0,0.0,0.21532969724481266,0.10384091180405604,0.15922221867944225,0.0,0.0472489750307613,0.0,0.0,0.07742719567693432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047793320713719764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285528561096305,0.0751151932093259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609018279705796
mentalhealth,FriendlyHuckleberry,2020/01/26,"For those who're depressed because appearance Just listen to him, this is a very good video. He really is speaking the truth.

 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zVHVYq6Bj5M&t=275s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zVHVYq6Bj5M&t=275s)",23.97875,32.19447604166666,8.180000000000003,50.66500000000002,38.58333333333333,8.200000000000001,28.83333333333333,8.841846274778883,3.2671833333333336,211,5,17,3,3,42,23,24,0.11699999999999999,0.675,0.20800000000000002,0.3722,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,2,2,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7858450846402105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22106324613050335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3123430922388841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041669713834512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323178025180688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992176950655011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,money_bag_,2020/01/26,"I have weird compulsions... I always feel the need to check something a million times over. For example, after you flush the toilet, a normal person would just glance into the bowl to make sure everything’s all g. With me, I have these weird compulsions which keep my eyes fixated on it. My body wants to leave the room because it is clearly flushed, but my mind says otherwise. It’s an extremely weird feeling when this happens, and it’s sometimes difficult to click out of it. What is this?",4.337499999999999,6.615755793478261,4.414565217391306,83.8951086956522,72.58695652173913,8.078260869565218,28.89130434782609,8.841846274778883,2.4624739130434783,391,16,71,8,8,121,69,92,0.1,0.8370000000000001,0.062,-0.3469,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,7,0,5,2,2,1,3,18,12,3,0,4,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,10,4,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,4,0,1,0,6,8,1,12,11,1,8,0,0,3,0,3,5,0,0,3,48,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21597751799027093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15822742187684247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883163909813835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332788212525981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624860789267146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229531031892422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307118505003255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748401320625043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17326056578951704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620850116683829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924629507969493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543169932113822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22664072386783635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20641521085445427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998245642351752,0.256714811091911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446354055086027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15135348907464416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530972013631085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438637163258145,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goblinlaundrycat,2020/01/26,"Travel Anxiety I've been suffering with anxiety related to travelling for a while. It's mostly the feeling of being trapped, as if once I'm on a plane or a bus I can't just get up and leave or I feel as if I'm forced to be there. I have a tendency to overthink by a mile and I always find myself overthinking the 'what-ifs' and the possibilities of an accident, which makes me panic. However, in a few months I'll be taking a 10 hour journey for a holiday. Is there anything that can help a little? (for example, techniques or items that can prevent panic attacks or anxious feelings or thoughts)",4.6496008403361335,5.482486596638658,6.374275210084032,75.85620273109244,69.58823529411765,9.983613445378152,34.202731092436984,10.125756701596842,3.624536974789915,471,23,89,12,8,163,82,119,0.23800000000000002,0.696,0.066,-0.9623,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,2,13,0,9,0,0,1,0,20,18,13,0,2,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,5,3,0,3,1,4,0,0,2,3,6,0,15,13,3,11,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,8,3,64,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17192060779937482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161205107116966,0.23341665016809446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002691233388215,0.0,0.0,0.2350549047845511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31341294210530923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888427801015712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079480460049228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384899823027282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034746008446217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21877593090024616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20708296287129824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379174186988256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16491848267186754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200387133303716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4848374306007409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329278777458657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15534910639910388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640295898293116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nash4N00b,2020/01/26,"A dissociative state I just have a question, if any of you have felt like this before. Sometimes, it can happen in bed, when I’m listening to music on the bus or whatever, I can fall into this dissociative state I guess. It doesn’t happen very often, but it usually happens when I’m tired. I kind of enjoy it, actually. It’s very hard to explain, but here goes: 

It feels like I’m in this big space, almost like I’m floating in space, but kind of also like I’m in this big warehouse that goes on for miles. Auditory perceptions feel like they’re far away, but at the same time very close. It kind of feels like my head is in a bobble of some sort, but I feel like you have to experience it to truly know what I’m talking about. 

Do any of you know what I’m talking about/have experienced it too, and if so, am I right about it being a form of dissociation? Thank you in advance",3.3046323841903917,4.261646790055252,4.964861878453043,84.26550786230347,72.8121546961326,8.000169995750106,24.97280067998301,8.384062270229773,1.370176030599234,683,20,149,11,13,232,95,181,0.032,0.7929999999999999,0.175,0.9793,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,4,0,1,10,12,0,0,6,0,10,2,1,0,0,28,31,13,0,2,9,0,6,7,0,0,1,1,1,0,17,3,0,0,10,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,8,11,12,25,29,3,27,0,0,0,0,9,19,0,9,11,89,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.11803487938803907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111921440660292,0.0,0.0,0.09672787250527032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450744019286584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364144224468843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292401193317696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183174473935199,0.0,0.0,0.24463444182588395,0.3456418290066087,0.11613601165419805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324584832027747,0.0,0.32088099356537164,0.0,0.10835214908199044,0.0,0.12413498565841663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3778688501998406,0.13294768811511884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41364839013958665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354975658039189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329512558069974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962783850613433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944385020817676,0.0,0.11135934655039928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052998099856038,0.13902027063471345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321512327492682,0.29940225473117404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TangoAlphaAlpha2,2020/01/26,Therapy Resources Where can someone begin to look into affordable therapy? Preferably not in person.,8.695999999999998,13.181390933333335,8.575000000000003,46.9425,73.0,11.0,47.5,10.125756701596842,8.129000000000001,84,6,6,3,2,27,14,15,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,6,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083505266484829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32061968615067304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31112233185184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8398368080712589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Trowit25away,2020/01/26,My cousin came in and we talked about kobe bryant And I level headed we talked. I got out of the confort zone. She left and now I want to scream. Why is that. I want to scream get out!!!! I want to be alone!!!!!,-2.0970476190476184,-0.28111302222221823,-0.4961904761904741,110.07,101.44444444444444,2.571428571428572,8.650793650793652,3.1291,-2.5639206349206347,154,1,42,0,7,48,31,45,0.14400000000000002,0.77,0.086,-0.6876,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,11,8,3,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,8,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,2,9,0,8,5,0,7,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,1,25,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982778316752192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32939161836861797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15046644246290086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303373516407417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295567806024793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3129093681391545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4629618407915659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5096039268393778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598723188501162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pleasehelpme125679,2020/01/26,"What is the best way to make it look like I’m killing my self but not actually have a threat of dying Ok hear me out. I don’t wanna be here anymore. But I don’t wanna be dead. I want to put myself to a point where to those around me, it looks like I was seriously attempting suicide where there’s no chance I will die, but I will be sent to the hospital, or something like that, because I DONT WANNA FUCKING DIE I know I need help but I’m a teenager and I’m afraid to reach out, this is an attempt at life",1.4126126126126124,2.6180781891891947,3.35873873873874,92.9490990990991,77.91891891891892,6.374774774774775,23.144144144144143,6.937597516519254,0.4879441441441443,393,12,95,4,9,133,72,111,0.188,0.57,0.24100000000000002,0.4652,0,0,1,0,0,2,8.0,0,0,0,3,5,10,3,1,6,1,12,2,0,1,0,17,24,6,6,5,6,0,0,3,0,2,1,1,0,1,6,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,2,3,13,5,14,17,1,10,0,0,2,1,4,7,1,1,3,64,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.17361938566462573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644388319142718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15838207948613425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845533903178332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18671082699871194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5539430751138457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20851506722263005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447956029021887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20052314726268256,0.0,0.11925268122694285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19683659877722945,0.0,0.09777743687184302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566663346308488,0.2607608618360674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29880759949970725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875965101780404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319217259065734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818719210251665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788537259725271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560415773655586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13696766719660572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19461014467355306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493888279098136,0.1412206540447045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,allypkuhn,2020/01/26,"idk what my issue is okay so my self esteem has been progressively getting worse since i was about 15 i’m 20 now lol, and i don’t know where it stems from. i have a loving family i have friends that love me, but still there is a part of my brain that can’t believe that anyone can ever love me. when i’m talking to a guy i’m just waiting for something to happen to like make things bad. if i meet them on tinder or something i’m 100% sure if they see me in real life they will be disgusted, and i don’t know what i really look like. i don’t know where this comes from and maybe this is just like normal thought but i don’t know how to tell.",0.3078419452887537,2.1119873475177333,2.1463677811550177,97.61250000000004,83.32624113475177,5.163323201621076,17.163627152988855,6.1826913282559595,-0.5516245187436675,500,10,122,4,14,165,88,141,0.085,0.718,0.196,0.9366,0,0,2,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,3,1,12,11,1,0,3,2,16,5,1,2,2,23,35,11,0,3,7,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,2,9,4,0,1,5,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,3,2,18,9,11,30,1,9,0,0,2,3,12,4,0,3,7,77,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986413977721173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119124333158672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17702395241471008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17540136721818614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13534765645387614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212685877449538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812169525593818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139293383265595,0.0,0.08209034591366265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555765930476626,0.13894345734668034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399571687277786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3454030335866468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098070732735238,0.23028726156142196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194384950642918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4254292546783872,0.0,0.10488090361533484,0.0,0.1578512942289121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539472985742643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014902893947398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17884051078181526,0.1006570949361138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520678495645873,0.0,0.1639136828993779,0.0,0.0,0.12997386968736985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24192211038934205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12547872771401294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14808668244345824,0.0,0.0,0.1262896132630242,0.13733253358525224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438562016694852,0.0,0.0,0.12473820756839203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601218841100962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clear-my-mind,2020/01/26,"Kobe Bryant, and his startling effect on my mental health. Today, the world lost a titan. It lost a father, a husband, a son, teammate, and champion. This morning, we lost Kobe Bryant. 

I don’t watch basketball. My opinion of the game is that it’s a bunch of primadonnas that take 12.5% of their total days off to rest themselves, have little integrity or determination. I can feel myself turning bright red with fucking shame as I type these words. How judgmental an asshole must I seem. These athletes train their bodies and minds to do things that so few people can ever dream of doing, and risk their health to do it. All because of the love of a game. And nobody in my lifetime did this better in the game of basketball than the Black Mamba. 

I knew all my life he was a beast. Of the few games I watched, of the handful of iconic basketball moments I have committed to memory, many of them include Kobe. Dropping 60 in his last game to the wild excitement of all the famous LA residents in attendance, getting to the gym early to work on his left hand after an injury to his dominant hand, his complicated relationship with Shaq, another all-timer, and of course his fucking GRIT. The guy was Tiger Woods-Michael Jordan level intense, and always lived up to the promises he made. There’s a reason we shout his name whenever something needs to be thrown with accuracy. He had a clutch gene like no athlete I’ve ever seen and a basketball mind to match.

I didn’t appreciate all that until I saw a tweet that just said ""Stop playin, Kobe is alive"". And the hundred or so emotional retweets, deep dives, motivational videos, and awe-inspiring pictures that followed it. My heart sank deep, almost too deep for someone that, again, doesn’t watch basketball. 

I’m at a loss for words. I know I have to say something, but I don’t know what. This is the best I can think of.

I feel selfish. I’ve been healthy for about a year now, but there were times that I wanted to kill myself. To take all that I am out of this world, irrevocably and permanently. Witnessing the death of a man that earned everything he worked for, a man that meant so much to so many people, is a sobering thing for me. 

Appreciate your life. Work hard and do your best every day. Today was the last for a man that was a role model, the gold standard for so many incredible people. He was a friend to many, as I am a friend. He was a son, as I am. He was a father, as I hope to be. Live and love in every moment, because this existence is finite. 

Rest in Eternal Peace, Kobe Bryant. What you meant to me in your life will guide me to greatness. What you mean to me in your passing will hold more weight than the world might ever know. Mamba forever.",4.54218045112782,5.857037400000002,5.037015037593985,83.55711654135341,70.23809523809524,8.040601503759401,27.149122807017545,8.452757503120043,1.7770761904761905,2125,70,418,33,38,678,256,525,0.065,0.8,0.135,0.9887,1,0,2,0,0,1,79.0,2,6,4,13,16,24,3,3,42,0,39,15,5,5,11,65,70,28,2,4,5,5,7,1,2,4,5,3,0,4,28,19,1,2,14,8,0,3,5,11,0,0,22,18,49,13,69,42,15,47,0,4,8,4,49,23,2,7,21,275,77,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872856026735655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372932622897106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291368265567937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802977378832797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859781969663244,0.07836697073587358,0.0,0.09842400933963677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429023592008908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967257657205822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24045423988645756,0.149312876598786,0.0,0.07963555871226102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960618643938198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13691733279225593,0.16383416297973866,0.046294256410288656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09769112569941653,0.0,0.08773629359002266,0.0,0.0,0.079375764093421,0.0,0.0,0.18837327141489188,0.0,0.1050014363996425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880081812212095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980321182387176,0.0,0.14609065557997414,0.1444554215322701,0.0,0.0,0.09627333699596896,0.0,0.1877602998656344,0.04328961144818096,0.08880894222882903,0.1564857642727209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901797614478115,0.0,0.15994516595356306,0.08384345507119369,0.0,0.3593402306942783,0.0,0.09652057530517616,0.0,0.0,0.08929647370774048,0.09399955965433338,0.17893854420433103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513740400800241,0.06570204074174935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18428982104320896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110424129413527,0.0,0.0951323113572975,0.0,0.0,0.08428692428466987,0.07046499358509838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066580230327901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507764964901918,0.13643022312832473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408062936613141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332450494642832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773502990566463,0.056776715024042225,0.0,0.0,0.051668298051189436,0.0,0.1679808941990288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963805458456426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226355784193972,0.0,0.0,0.10790121726497603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19352401434450192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570609347648609
mentalhealth,psikotrexx,2020/01/26,"How Did I Change My Life After Losing Weight? I want to tell you today my weight loss story,  how my life changed after losing weight. This topic is not about how to lose weight. 

If we go back to how my life changed after losing weight, we go back to the past I must say, I wasn’t very social at school before I lost weight. I thought I was so ugly and worthless. I was a fat man with glasses. And this situation made me psychologically worse. **I couldn’t communicate with girls and I couldn’t relate.** When I was in the second year of college, I decided to lose weight.

*“I’ve been stubborn about it !”*

I stopped myself as someone who likes to eat junk food. I’ve been stubborn about it ! I stubbornly abstained and stayed away from these foods. After a short weight-loss marathon of 4 months, I lost 22 kilograms. (48.50 pounds !) I dropped 78 kilogram when I was 100.

*“This greatly increased my self-confidence.”*

The actual event starts from here. After losing weight, people started to feel the difference in their gaze. This greatly increased my self-confidence. Psychologically, I felt better now. I also started using the lens after losing weight. So I lost weight and got rid of the glasses. **Now I realize the girls are trying to talk to me.** I started to get offers from girls who I liked but didn’t look at me when I was in the 1st year of college ! yes it was getting real, like in the movies ! All of a sudden I was becoming popular at school. Of course I pushed those girls aside. And I started dating another girl from school. Obviously, this sequence of events increased my self-esteem.

*“Now that I know, all my life has changed !”*

I was in archaeology when I was in college. And job opportunities were very limited. So I wanted to turn to different professions. I was able to enter the Police Academy, which is a written examination and a physical examination requirement. I had to see him in my eyes well to get into the police academy. That’s why I had surgery in my eyes and I got rid of the lens too.  I was going to graduate as senior officer, not as regular police officer. And it was a very cool and difficult success in my country.

I won the exam and went to the police academy. In the meantime, I could not run with my beloved in school and we left friendly. After school is finished i was appointed to a different city and started working as a commissioner. I started working in the smuggling unit, which is a cool unit, wearing civilian clothes. I’m not someone who likes to wear a uniform anyway. After some success in business life, I met a girl with a lawyer. She is the love of my life. Our ideas, thoughts and hobbies were the same. We had a lot in common. Everything went great and after 1.5 years, we got married last August 2018 ! Now that I know, all my life has changed !

**Now I want to ask you !**

If I didn’t lose weight, could I find the love of my life ? Could I be able to do my favorite job ?

You know very well what the answer is.

*“I would never have met the woman i was married.”*

Yes being overweight is not a big problem but it is really blocking us to do some things. If I didn’t lose weight, I wouldn’t be a police officer because of physical barriers. After losing weight, being a cop and being assigned to a different city made me meet my wife now. so if I had not lost weight I would be in another city, i would be in a different job and i would never have met the woman i was married to. In short, who says that losing weight does not affect human life is lying ! I hope my story will inspire you. My goal is to encourage and encourage people who want to lose weight. If you have detailed questions about my weight loss story, i can answer these questions. 

I hope you liked my weight loss story I wish a happy and healthy day. You can also read my article about how I lost weight here: (my menu, before-after photos etc...) [https://www.bestdietlists.com/diets/how-did-i-lose-weight-50-pounds/](https://www.bestdietlists.com/diets/how-did-i-lose-weight-50-pounds/)",2.512386666666668,5.336256798666671,3.4719999999999978,85.01266666666666,83.01333333333334,5.8400000000000025,23.266666666666666,7.257412932260183,1.1477066666666675,3149,112,578,47,90,1005,280,750,0.10400000000000001,0.727,0.16899999999999998,0.9967,7,0,0,0,0,0,157.0,7,7,1,30,35,53,3,0,41,4,67,39,5,9,7,110,119,46,0,24,14,1,21,5,1,7,11,2,0,10,26,30,24,9,18,2,0,11,16,26,2,1,48,29,105,27,86,52,11,87,0,21,4,2,51,26,0,12,53,399,131,23,0.0551292533466771,0.0,0.02689909938797766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044086843983687035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780782894213976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025769204988487858,0.0,0.02589787413162519,0.04239099289786999,0.0,0.016803140574452285,0.030442964517971623,0.02345546706832552,0.0,0.0,0.02437867227694124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579860040663956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602433433372389,0.0,0.0,0.01777690383963449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399584020957445,0.0,0.0,0.02412199055657976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028205494603418337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03074184512076666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02477330907660843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.013937503470401548,0.0,0.026466364317106826,0.0,0.025193569404114328,0.0,0.06666251197624673,0.0,0.02129636219080849,0.0,0.04320413924642685,0.0,0.04699683769658779,0.0,0.0661378500817114,0.0911702946571091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02934305765591915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05475578773901433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031117108336309013,0.0,0.0,0.08206091604485477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04544639382720661,0.022468849740484718,0.0,0.0,0.029949047533591476,0.0,0.17522739902012713,0.0673334212475964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0231473440769791,0.4317287308463911,0.15045023090956502,0.023434459877294492,0.04975630353513149,0.05216463248620663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02200182202878061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04251907879162176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026313555162222287,0.03821968285023872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02637562504223847,0.0,0.0,0.06175738067061549,0.0,0.027572086052787062,0.031374579819028664,0.017658605679545875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04384099498748427,0.0,0.13948436899301295,0.02196543865440474,0.0,0.08626775172597649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030983795293416876,0.0,0.028098665598178547,0.046710837459450455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657269243620734,0.02938022444349805,0.0,0.02304526216118943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02215540279052873,0.024092698672598795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01831271314071725,0.0,0.0,0.043766469159906035,0.0,0.0,0.026128043039125987,0.0,0.0,0.018714572121581296,0.029982398438785838,0.0,0.0,0.03315685194506112,0.02380698718894045,0.0,0.09097481522697053,0.06503332394714427,0.0,0.0,0.7384583653582302,0.0495678195158279,0.051105370168724414,0.024872788169274653,0.0,0.031697960318531636,0.0,0.0,0.04013475302261936,0.0,0.02809070949207048,0.07832447968385732,0.0,0.0,0.05325214750753477
mentalhealth,Yeetusmegetus21,2020/01/26,"Slipping back Hi guys,

For the last few weeks I haven't been feeling okay, I was on antidepressants for about 4 months but then I slowly took myself off them but now I feel I'm slipping back, my bad days are more frequent and idk what to do anymore, all I want to do is sleep.",3.360689655172415,4.056070068965518,3.899482758620693,92.9312931034483,72.44827586206897,6.4896551724137925,24.84482758620689,5.985473137389443,0.4057793103448275,216,6,50,1,4,68,47,58,0.166,0.8079999999999999,0.026000000000000002,-0.7791,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,1,1,7,1,1,0,1,7,12,4,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,2,8,1,7,9,3,12,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,9,34,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29910732860406164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4638253824638422,0.25182438799853546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19450781071126352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049972381314498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29863258656755204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458452164475388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24073518499523805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018189934702437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350900091093321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17789219059666558,0.0,0.2419262748583864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GoopyDumpy,2020/01/26,"Online gaming and its effects on mental health    


TW: Self-harm

So, I’ve recently made the decision to stop playing League of Legends, a game I was obsessed with and, at some points, addicted to playing. I’ve had time to reflect on how the game has negatively affected my mental health. I wanted to make an open discussion post about the issues that online gaming brought me and what I’ve learnt from LoL.

I love videogames, but my relationship with LoL was unhealthy. I would obsess over it, constantly thinking about it at night. I would force myself to play more games even though I wasn’t enjoying them. 

I would put myself too much into the game, identifying with the champions I mained and feeling a right fool if I played badly. League became too much of my identity because I played it so much.

LoL has a very toxic community, with streamers and influencers that pride themselves on narcissism and bullying (not all of them, but certainly some of the highest level one). The abuse thrown at you in chat is a nightmare and even one comment would trigger me so badly, I would have the urge to self harm. I would play with chat completely turned off, but I still struggled as I would play with others over voice chat and have to hear their toxicity, swearing and insults, even if it was just banter.

This toxicity rubbed off on me. I am 100% responsible for my own behaviour, it’s not other people’s fault how i chose to behave. But I saw a really ugly side of myself while playing which i didn’t like. An apathetic, depressed, bitchy side would rear its head when things went wrong.

This is all my own opinion though and my own experience. League of Legends is not a bad game, it just hurts me too much to play. I feel much calmer having decided to stop. It’s sad for me because I’ve made some amazing friends through LoL, but I can carry on these friendships so it’s okay.

What experiences do you guys have of online gaming? How has it affected your mental health for better or worse? What advice would you give someone with mental health problems who is new to online gaming?",6.295331632653062,7.136623053571434,6.23846530612245,78.26367755102042,65.91326530612244,9.129142857142858,30.73102040816327,9.174902378510234,2.5617215102040816,1655,59,302,28,25,522,197,392,0.18600000000000005,0.623,0.191,-0.5927,0,0,0,0,1,0,45.0,0,4,3,3,21,33,1,3,16,5,29,7,1,11,3,69,43,30,0,13,13,0,3,1,1,9,5,2,0,2,24,19,0,2,7,21,0,3,6,15,0,2,11,6,41,18,47,23,15,34,0,3,1,1,30,20,0,7,11,216,65,0,0.0,0.09491908792121813,0.0,0.08733341542910875,0.0,0.07828408039825499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20066939630912464,0.09767051576391064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708521566066174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399543697018859,0.08657212641177205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899996143243338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15873877152927282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567289380333018,0.0,0.0,0.08101361447187594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06189398552773555,0.0,0.0,0.07685029950127499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932303054657754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221756344317628,0.3406193298391498,0.09029154023486698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576107218332324,0.0,0.0,0.08361564554265498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03913845719650993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230380248336983,0.15160697302351542,0.05347508232606108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32293440362182163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944560384551687,0.0,0.0,0.07737223510050538,0.0,0.075179263647994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857132043471852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553926243394509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573130997600189,0.0,0.07672472091848317,0.0,0.0,0.07665593494431977,0.0,0.08053423564936057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051321510902999336,0.0,0.07910049181962463,0.08600982479409848,0.0,0.0684148267771296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714763861226906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787825713612818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397718806167077,0.13395368748031045,0.0,0.0837499871206749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053222554723187515,0.05133224707703618,0.15741838409180392,0.0,0.04671368959071517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713836280723776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610041948240318,0.04725186836067181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426421032080767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816405145248907,0.5121805254492194,0.0875894048263862,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kieran321able,2020/01/26,"Tips and help to help me communicate better with others Any help would be great, I want to talk to my friends but I never know what to say or how to carry on the sentence and make it interesting for them to talk to me and thank you for the help.",4.627435897435895,4.202456615384612,5.466153846153849,86.74551282051284,69.38461538461539,8.471794871794872,25.025641025641022,7.793537801064563,0.9352487179487174,192,4,45,2,3,63,36,52,0.0,0.609,0.391,0.9640000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,1,1,1,5,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,1,12,6,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,7,5,11,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,1,1,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673896586250786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21769865451853385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901739907084095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713799758171406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6599535415353608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527697046706733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16430626857678526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898451675126453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957474450025012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3956902429322485,0.0,0.2266207896971645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518496907184314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748570804978572,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FrogginBullfish_,2020/01/26,"I get overly depressed and emotional whenever one of my plants dies. I like having houseplants so that they can be uplifting and cheerful to have around. So when instead of having a happy looking plant, I have a very dead bleak looking plant it just makes me feel horrible.

Now I feel like I need to get a new one ASAP despite how little money I have. I just can't stand seeing the dead plant and would feel equally bummed out by no plant.

Does anyone else get super emotional over a plant dying?",5.9496875,6.543127927083333,6.0145833333333325,80.43875,66.60416666666666,8.483333333333333,29.541666666666664,8.344100000000001,2.1118666666666663,395,13,72,5,6,125,65,96,0.166,0.6579999999999999,0.17600000000000002,-0.223,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,1,9,6,0,0,5,0,9,0,0,2,0,14,20,7,4,2,2,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,1,0,2,0,6,10,5,9,18,1,9,0,1,3,0,1,5,0,0,5,50,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12625201289167254,0.18500544249048065,0.0,0.16073701535031829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551638696883271,0.0,0.3747863262336308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15800960150539953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083502485344308,0.4062122396861031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738902534812859,0.12899236844136364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830060317658812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922098773849761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642535817054816,0.18096893131304667,0.0,0.0,0.3032504805051571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052545282004833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13388323067157204,0.0,0.1743863359447873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447047669581192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388324216166626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14898121972276376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282649103308376,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Austinfromdahood,2020/01/26,"What condition does my grandma have? My grandma is not the most sane person. She was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, but some of her issues don’t seem to match bipolar disorder. First of all, she is extremely addicted to cooking. She cooks 24/7 and she never stops. She always cooks so much food that her family can’t keep up with eating it. She also goes to soup kitchens and places where they give out food to the homeless to get food that she does not cook with. She also just buys ingredients and leaves it around for it to rot and go bad. Let me give you a bit of backstory about my grandma. She has four kids and moved to America in the 90’s. Her husband (my grandpa) is very abusive (not in a physical way much), racist, sexist, I’m pretty sure he’s a narcissist, and he is not very sane either. Even with all of these traits, my grandma still stayed married with my grandpa. I’m pretty sure they drove each other crazy. I’m just wondering if anyone in this subreddit knows what’s up with my grandma, if there actually is a cooking disorder out there.",4.121868932038836,5.763074427184467,4.782706310679612,83.70473907766991,71.71844660194175,8.256796116504855,27.923543689320393,8.841846274778883,2.160855339805825,836,31,162,16,16,268,118,206,0.126,0.8029999999999999,0.071,-0.9368,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,2,1,12,3,0,0,7,0,11,14,0,0,5,38,23,12,0,2,10,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,2,10,16,10,2,3,5,1,3,7,1,0,2,2,0,23,2,27,20,9,19,0,0,0,0,24,10,0,6,4,112,33,0,0.0,0.13961018892130114,0.11498582953359753,0.1284529265317015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18845844070334408,0.09804463586419923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239001072287312,0.0,0.0,0.1048943625923674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838376713962567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286406776872826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195957463501241,0.0,0.0,0.4051327958608213,0.0,0.2062289933312494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057028927254727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782610911983934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110803587519485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022678867707152,0.4274442869530436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06156171152649316,0.2260680136525671,0.0669659392687481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298470546488585,0.0,0.10473339809784712,0.0,0.0,0.06475670700791195,0.0,0.0,0.12476576691723312,0.0,0.12048994068576314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12523545580754886,0.17323834039308986,0.0,0.09087835015108653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028852792197636,0.12310807062399652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23975249824674105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726870321528567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12559191781078033,0.09409980128924994,0.09851179581157038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22210820344423185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944454430361773,0.0,0.09352857683746572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778243852505386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,timber737,2020/01/26,"Thoughts about hurting others. I have for the last 2 years had thoughts about hitting and beating up people (and animals) and it makes me feel good whenever i have these thoughts. I know it's bad but i cannot help myself because it feels so good beating someone up with my bare hands until they die. I am probably not gonna hurt anyone but is there anyway i can get help and remove these thoughts?

I have not told anyone about this because i'm scared if i do i will get reported to the police or something. My parents are not alive anymore and i have no friends (except some at my work place). 

What should i do?",3.994744990892531,5.294954303278691,4.204863387978143,89.05971766848816,71.54098360655738,6.733697632058287,29.12932604735884,6.937597516519254,1.4191118397085605,483,19,98,4,9,150,80,122,0.22699999999999998,0.6729999999999999,0.1,-0.9468,1,0,1,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,1,3,6,7,0,1,2,0,14,1,1,1,0,24,28,11,1,2,8,1,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,6,3,17,3,11,18,1,8,0,2,0,0,6,4,0,3,3,69,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143132813358954,0.2276353262394274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13591223458401053,0.1984550453821589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16893712363119134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646101734063899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576132736393406,0.0,0.17008882708277553,0.0,0.0,0.2730597291329986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21821236719292872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485129025693714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945813938245233,0.1326852136710804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865510237997976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18074491269105375,0.0,0.0,0.11284927452889384,0.0,0.17006761847295135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755014455244004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16296845999609705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792066618112034,0.12531390732836606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5169079306848048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554067242407932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185038028637288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482323531008243
mentalhealth,GOLDEN_Knight14,2020/01/26,"Just had to vent a bit... So, I recently started scratching my arms with scissors.
And using rubber bands in school.(can't use scissors during class)
I'm feeling stressed, sad, I hate myself and I just gave up on people...
I'm not depressed or anything...I'm just bad with dealing with pressure.
I'm an intovert and I don't open up about my feelings.
Usually I hate pain...but when i scratch myself it feels...deserved and the feeling when I remove scissors is pretty solid.
I'm still oposed to self harm(I wouldn't recommend it to anyone) but it's helping me deal with stuff...
I know I contradict myself by saying I son't support it but I'm doing it...I still belive this is not a solution...it's just a coping mechanism.
I still hate myself(I even evisioned myself running in front of a car) but I would never kill myself...that's a promise to myself that i will never  break.
My reason for self harming is that I'm being bullied, teachers aren't helping me and my mom is just telling me to suck it up and to ignore them...but I can't...
Anyway, I know it's addictive but I'm not addicted and I won't be.
The thing is that when I was on a verge of a breakdown...it helped me get myself together.
I still don't recommend self harm...but in my case I find it helpful...
I don't care what other people think of me and my behaviour, I don't care about anything...but I just can't deal with stress...
I know I'm just a stupid teenager...but...at least I found a way to cope with stress and other stuff...
I've never talked to a therapist outside about my tics (they are getting a bit better). But I know I'm not depressed or anything like that. As my mom says: I have low self esteem. 

Thanks for reading and sorry if I made some grammar/spelling mistakes.",1.3324028110047872,3.639200161931818,2.9737679425837307,90.2408492822967,82.89204545454545,5.068899521531102,24.035885167464123,6.339386263674448,0.7412431818181822,1355,52,270,12,38,446,164,352,0.204,0.711,0.085,-0.9912,0,0,0,0,0,1,86.0,0,0,1,1,20,25,6,4,14,0,23,3,1,4,3,58,56,23,1,4,19,2,5,1,0,4,2,2,0,4,18,17,0,1,11,2,0,4,16,18,0,0,5,7,47,7,32,45,4,30,0,4,0,0,20,11,1,4,14,178,65,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863485340200076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059762195111650526,0.0,0.0703340377002654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136338296391552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559074296433872,0.1866209073597809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17428350889911814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643456102563067,0.14722934626103448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645173580137933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296476974333267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811748759516847,0.0,0.0,0.09371279085495084,0.0,0.0,0.08930847279601208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531500274178231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229153361728092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455923308568548,0.0,0.18788699868055386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041756033967861456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808732174028959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200201467873268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19775782205280187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909454727678432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185074473987484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695311150596567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549253405314479,0.0,0.0,0.08787678306255646,0.08439072615231555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359374024045737,0.0,0.0864996006699404,0.0,0.0,0.35665291764050977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567600121093037,0.060495684639055386,0.0,0.27302390837312857,0.0,0.29371474334540515,0.0,0.1956840402821767,0.0,0.0969896677296166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869707006949348,0.07470402702776653,0.0786887447800713,0.0,0.09923656654792963,0.056782074769057486,0.054765343504304384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14763624769316555,0.09413247438087513,0.0,0.0,0.06784163527149382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06071501294594785,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,grape_tylenol,2020/01/26,"don’t have the energy lately I have just not had the energy to be happy or cheerful anymore. im not suicidal or depressed, I just haven’t been able to feel truly happy. once again I don’t want to harm myself, I’m not suicidal, please don’t think that",2.879716981132073,4.043370132075474,4.9397641509434,83.24662735849058,74.09433962264151,8.318867924528304,22.683962264150942,8.841846274778883,1.4947396226415102,199,5,41,4,4,69,32,53,0.08199999999999999,0.48,0.43799999999999994,0.971,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,0,10,13,2,2,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,1,4,3,3,10,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,27,5,0,0.2367796158857524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348217543779102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039379362058286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197228882232606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5041126080189003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557626167426972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26709772011325633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25216256326763753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599129146583889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5179969377845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171881711773946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396587521977265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,autopilot_r,2020/01/26,"Idk what the fucks going on in my head I’m 16. For years now I’ve felt depressed, confused and overall not real. Been on a rollercoaster ride with fixing myself but nothing works. It would start by just going to the doctors/ school counsellors (my mum would make me). I could never speak to them about how I feel so it never worked. Recently did out of school counselling, but again I don’t talk. I discovered along the way a thing called derealisation and related to every single symptom- feeling like you’re in a dream. That’s me. That’s what I am. No one gets it though not even the counsellors. I want to be fixed and feel normal again like I did as a kid. My mind works so weirdly. I’m obsessed with conspiracy theories and thinking of alternate dimensions and what could be. That fucks with my head even more. I don’t know what to do. I just want to feel sane.",2.4394117647058806,4.777174502923977,3.37621603027176,88.77266253869968,78.82456140350877,6.596628826969385,22.92432060543517,7.724431198458867,1.0621569315445472,684,22,139,11,17,218,103,171,0.14300000000000002,0.778,0.079,-0.9041,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,3,12,8,2,2,8,0,13,6,2,2,2,37,31,12,0,7,6,1,5,2,0,2,2,1,0,1,11,10,0,0,7,1,0,3,7,6,0,1,4,6,17,2,21,21,2,17,0,1,0,2,6,5,2,1,10,96,28,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449378823551193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266570704562065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225378736537568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528288005349954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875017088735038,0.0,0.11959162180107087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870790357482656,0.10140285464802576,0.13628585571391486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262444789806256,0.07415844273173766,0.0,0.1613369625079808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29134533730787565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800719682842956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386906463301842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474688403178252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433201957632939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21894767894274167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390722842979908,0.13619645390755306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096183061894909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615602130715424,0.0,0.0,0.14014985670510094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873042380761163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046674462947433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14753130313654092,0.0,0.11408699705845125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942994568850902,0.09095021923002244,0.13945655371855284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744124916182787,0.11266635441409452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100047532417691,0.0,0.0,0.2016619776174176,0.0,0.0,0.09140550882763322
mentalhealth,gruntledelf,2020/01/26,"Pittsburgh - Local Mental Health Meetup Hey there,

I have been looking for a local mental health peer group and havent had much success. I was thinking about trying to get one started. Probably along the lines of Emotions Anonymous, Depression Anonymous, or GROW. Would anyone be down to meet up and just talk about stuff over coffee in a group setting?",6.344838709677423,8.746636064516128,5.0427741935483885,80.99416129032262,67.38709677419354,6.250322580645161,30.14193548387097,6.742157984588678,1.8556993548387093,284,11,43,2,5,83,51,62,0.109,0.8909999999999999,0.0,-0.7716,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,3,0,7,2,0,0,0,7,11,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,3,1,2,1,11,6,1,9,0,1,1,0,5,6,0,1,1,31,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16457223894432754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20271898570007965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26475323537650003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296816823143256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5003626351476221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19764679150303133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47438385030099495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17301989221355524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15948898736846928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25376259744094065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665921114329755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694358914924768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18917696395070807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15081198373353455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597969564837156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671960944436686,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,direalsensei,2020/01/26,"I am not okay I’m not okay. I had a major relapse in my life recently. I went sober for about six months from cannabis addiction but I’ve been smoking again. Of course I’ve stopped now but Im feeling the effects. I really and truly struggle with loneliness and solitude, I dont always feel content. The quality of my life troubles me sometimes, and at times even when I want to feel good I just feel truly down and out 😔😪 I dont know what to do, I’ve researched and practiced so many things and Im finding it hard to balance myself again",0.2602083333333347,2.65354579464286,2.071999999999999,93.50633333333334,91.05357142857143,4.772380952380952,24.43095238095239,6.42735559955562,0.8390516666666672,427,19,89,5,15,140,75,112,0.153,0.7120000000000001,0.135,-0.0197,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,8,5,0,1,3,2,6,3,0,1,0,22,14,10,0,1,5,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,7,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,3,5,12,3,13,11,1,13,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,8,55,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20237635610119456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15446838524592316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4351403074665753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261428990736127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754631605977618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16967273255386156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557070665965664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16629808970577892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4010487963917573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202357199031667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622477994121736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18821108244249754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817706871568992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892653361974127,0.0,0.1832983311326262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18360393575717449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520439127099467,0.0,0.19407253379162992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333179269758725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824890144237104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949601467915104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17209129174224894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hayden_den,2020/01/26,"I think i have anxiety and i want to seek help but idk how. So for 2 years now i have been always worried and stressed mainly over school and my health  but there other things too that stress me out.
I have had many different attacks. A lot of them are the general anxiety and panic attacks but lately they are different. I am more sensitive to sound and i get so irritated by it. Sometimes i hear voices telling me to self harm myself or kill myself.
I also just cant seem to relax whatsoever. When i try to relax i just get so anxious.
Honestly school just causes so much for me like i cant even describe. I get so many headaches and attacks because of it.
I cant seem to stop thinking the worst. Im so pessimistic i cant even imagine myself doing well in life or being good at anything. Like my self esteem has plummeted.
I worry so much what my loved ones think of me like all the time. Im just so worried i will do something that will push them away.
I self harmed myself a lot and drank a lot alcohol just to get a hold of myself during my attacks. Sometimes i feel like im not in control. My whole body feels numb. Sometimes my arms and legs feel numb for weeks.
I cant even sleep because of my constant over thinking and anxiousness.
I feel so worthless and useless i have no idea what to do anymore.",1.7161890838206662,3.9417152443609065,3.15748538011696,89.97221247563354,80.76691729323309,5.745252018936228,24.5135059871902,6.937597516519254,0.9651995544416604,1029,39,210,12,27,336,134,266,0.308,0.5870000000000001,0.106,-0.9969,2,0,2,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,3,1,25,25,5,3,7,0,21,11,4,3,1,45,39,27,1,1,11,0,4,4,0,2,5,3,0,3,8,11,2,3,12,2,0,1,7,15,1,1,3,7,41,10,24,33,10,16,0,2,0,1,10,7,0,7,12,153,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752902509291623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654975199356339,0.06814956621874889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531060675978967,0.18505336458270644,0.08122542129982045,0.0,0.0,0.0673989027225243,0.0,0.0,0.37270435472982855,0.07695023612278988,0.0,0.0,0.0998541909839295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909753809654466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413658308594094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850766863463375,0.0918607867492372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17114167515850742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622877844441078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656497637695947,0.05851126981190406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116301771063866,0.0,0.0,0.06869605731202469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705868743641906,0.09231023950604532,0.0,0.05489762013049058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245812307865864,0.26540675099765393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061314778228023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923897570814744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05785026412785911,0.1600539916944194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20889211351511347,0.07392033968050844,0.0,0.0,0.16607286475607047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041574376998646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055499355569450494,0.0,0.0,0.09609511333455574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16577970956069574,0.0,0.14912219375458516,0.25632698001994364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196179951632053,0.0,0.0,0.06305266168069938,0.2430114464779139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847428309374667,0.187638418629974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158652645653901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05441248162165963,0.20991964517335315,0.0,0.0,0.04775809409290365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05560652339158969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048308305231428254,0.0,0.06569736586053597,0.0,0.07364031882402679,0.0,0.0,0.0914413842612396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24952835139658405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05274262157482715
mentalhealth,Thatgirl629,2020/01/26,"Please help me. I'm constantly on the verge of a panic attack I can't take it anymore. I'm on meds, but it's still always there. It's preventing me from even getting off the couch right now. I need help. 

Could it be my birth control that's making it worse?",0.3662424242424223,2.4596754727272767,2.145000000000003,96.01083333333334,85.18181818181819,5.121212121212121,18.25757575757576,6.42735559955562,-0.194515151515152,201,5,46,2,6,66,41,55,0.171,0.7020000000000001,0.127,-0.3506,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,1,1,3,0,3,0,0,2,0,6,9,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,5,7,0,9,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,27,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059623051897992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454802860699816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815977133590087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26748876728651777,0.27762259461332184,0.19763017976578987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16348925871352035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293226488697258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318242805894514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16522620437792646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274946712338847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18353814498209128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904196190527632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717103311516101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113867180724186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976753936674356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18610950992258632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522511747837875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,humannbean_,2020/01/26,"I think I might need help So here I am talking about my creepy habit of stalking. I'm doing it unconsciously and it's creeping me out, and it's not like it's some candid search for a person I want to know about or something, I'm starting to get better at it and it's weird. (today I found a person by their facial features in almost 10 minutes only and it's scary)

And I also have this urge for checking people's phones. Whenever I get the chance I'm breaking into their privacy, I'm lurking through their texts, pictures, I like to get to know them at a deeper level. It's not like I'm doing anything against them with that information, I just like knowing personal stuff, I just want to get to know them better. I know this is some sick way of getting to know someone, but at least I am aware of it.
Like yesterday my best friend stayed over the night and while she was asleep I broke into her phone and I just went through it, it made me feel so good, because I haven't talked to her in a while and I felt that if I looked through her phone I'll find something she doesn't talk to me about, or something she only keeps for herself.

And I'd like to know...How can I get rid of it..?
I'm starting to be afraid of myself.",3.2884157986111116,4.0993771210937515,4.19963541666667,90.28460069444445,72.7109375,6.626388888888887,25.940972222222207,6.42735559955562,0.7811977430555554,957,30,211,6,18,309,127,256,0.07200000000000001,0.813,0.11599999999999999,0.9284,0,0,3,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,6,3,10,14,0,1,6,0,12,3,2,1,0,43,43,18,0,4,9,0,2,6,1,1,1,0,0,3,17,13,0,1,12,0,1,1,4,3,0,0,5,3,37,11,37,36,4,21,0,1,1,0,25,10,0,7,13,137,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118056178884174,0.0,0.0,0.08928987531390589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09188194646610057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06806340355549312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717426250881947,0.19749824766155666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056455751176916424,0.0,0.10720560404647232,0.0,0.1020499753458411,0.0,0.0,0.1224231384129818,0.08626380810387241,0.0,0.3500084703532419,0.0,0.0,0.09365030001098552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483950020243213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924344086109696,0.0,0.0,0.429535847906556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272918037797149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09376146168441114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564996515088672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844753049890774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279022266930455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477996395651168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16983619960527482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740700870984506,0.2924765922571726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460429633170686,0.2578707241989735,0.0,0.0,0.15805892677806024,0.1190085903279991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278174202802051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692304062537565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154354455667934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583518775003124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171315661964814,0.08862595841223253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350462219352502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helpimcraZi,2020/01/26,"Usually extremely emotional but now can't identify emotions, and feel kind of numb I can't directly feel emotions, and feel numb, but just this horrible discomfort because I know I'm having emotions but I can't feel them. I'm always super emotional usually like from one emotion to another like a rollercoaster (my whole life, that's my thing) and I'm really good at understanding them but suddenly I can't identify any emotions or feel them.",6.13882113821138,7.919958573170737,7.296097560975614,67.09504065040652,66.92682926829268,12.783739837398373,38.05691056910569,12.161744961471696,5.80018861788618,361,20,58,15,6,122,48,82,0.17300000000000001,0.619,0.209,0.3525,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,3,1,2,8,0,1,1,0,5,3,0,0,0,16,15,8,0,0,6,0,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,0,5,9,5,4,15,1,5,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,6,34,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130241683873837,0.0,0.0,0.07461874610637369,0.11505928804375402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688911958034979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8640039614247929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27740865826614003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203457054661036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426473988658754,0.06030359340137384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750407262577398,0.10721503508534087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435447615643459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07029451320054134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289835216712201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423063107780465,0.0,0.0,0.24169959606756114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250730041820973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Intrepid_Rabbit,2020/01/26,"Really struggling right now and don’t feel like I want to help myself Hi all, new to reddit. The past two months my mental health has been really bad, I’m really lucky as I’m a uni student so I have my counselling assessment on Monday with view to start properly the week after.

The problem is, right now I feel like I’m in such a deep hole that I don’t even want to help myself. Im doing normal life things, but they’re a massive struggle and I’d really rather just curl up into a ball. I’ve been having similar symptoms intermittently for the past 12 years but in the past 2 years they’ve been more frequent and the past 2 months they’ve intensified (not sure if it’s triggering if I list my symptoms). I’ve never seen a doctor about it but I’m thinking I might need to soon.

I guess the question is, what do you do when you’re so deep in the hole you don’t even want to get out? Essentially I want to live and live a full life, but right now I don’t even see how I can start doing that.",3.014707740916272,3.831776947867304,4.492208530805686,87.90993996840444,73.36018957345972,7.711974723538706,22.597472353870447,8.021203637495839,0.8645769984202216,780,18,176,11,15,261,111,211,0.049,0.8590000000000001,0.092,0.486,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,0,15,8,0,2,14,0,18,6,0,2,3,35,36,15,0,10,9,0,2,2,0,1,6,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,4,1,0,0,6,4,0,1,4,5,17,4,19,31,3,34,0,0,3,0,6,13,0,6,23,104,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093416883280329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451607399916128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216912229481592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131419066350081,0.15985719449288688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058453781425609024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325075093788512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892544440206028,0.0,0.0,0.14998443148829138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085187107357732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805127719635645,0.10931988897997008,0.0,0.1975878947044517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275084558934292,0.11868923145543267,0.0,0.0,0.1786064555296316,0.0,0.0,0.08295916224892935,0.08629037569505306,0.10805643294587557,0.0,0.0,0.10962070681718623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4272165108653444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705606324354697,0.0,0.0,0.12533356157894684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866981621697909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286640115768026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915555123309535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583814577217502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23392693401625764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544755867757633,0.2325766892968455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432949827782262,0.07168953445684609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929255822042076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639638541370726,0.0,0.08974507497273101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144096813182416
mentalhealth,Deelove24,2020/01/26,Will never be loved I came to realize that I'll never be loved. I'll never find a relationship.. I'll never get married.. I'll never have a good life with someone. There's no point of living anymore.. Not this way. I feel so alone.. So unloved so empty.. My life is pointless.. I have nothing to live for anymore.,-0.3371428571428581,1.902234730158732,2.038428571428572,91.66907142857146,98.5238095238095,3.7898412698412702,20.585714285714285,5.6839178017228535,0.15407428571428605,240,9,48,2,10,81,41,63,0.23,0.77,0.0,-0.9239,0,1,0,0,0,2,16.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,6,4,0,0,5,11,11,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,7,1,0,0,1,1,4,3,5,7,0,8,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,5,30,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727573456245771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33084701678738226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19077791111981512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843404830927392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15245469311529708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714755320391278,0.0,0.0,0.13990623417541231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23563543285809474,0.0,0.0,0.2945797713381366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010919915445269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6432428256536793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16005173889679142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768251571689387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790837310776796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14133143017194053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13240026022540954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,teethkink,2020/01/26,"should i put on a fake persona? i feel like people are not interested in me. i am not an easily approachable person to begin with. well, i can socialize normally with people, i have few close friends and i like to make friends most of the time. 

but, i always compare myself to the people around me. take an example, my best friend. i envy her so much, she's pretty and has a really likeable personality. the boys adore her, and the girls like being around her. we're almost always together so people might associate me with her. but every time we pass by together, our friends prefer to say hi to her than to me. our friends would rather have a conversation with her. even though we're close we're so different and it hurts me to know that people prefer her.

i am assuming that this is because i am the less attractive one. maybe if i were a little bit prettier people would treat me as equal with my best friend. or maybe i am just boring. i treat people kindly and i always try to be as friendly as possible yet i don't get the same energy back. i really want to create another version of me just so more people would like me. i want to be someone else.

i don't know if is it the right choice to post this on r/mentalhealth, but this has been stressing me out for months to the point where i know it's unhealthy for me. i often stay up late thinking about this, i even cried several times. i am unhappy with myself. should i be someone else or should i just stay true to myself? convince me.",2.596605766840668,4.623521372483225,4.0782028337061895,85.48207183693764,76.88590604026845,7.502063136962466,22.78200347999005,8.401726058763845,1.40847984091474,1171,35,235,23,27,388,149,298,0.085,0.638,0.27699999999999997,0.9969,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,3,0,0,2,19,26,0,1,14,0,28,0,0,1,1,54,39,20,0,14,13,0,1,4,7,7,0,1,0,4,9,17,0,0,8,0,0,3,4,4,1,1,2,2,51,22,36,26,11,27,0,1,0,0,26,13,0,9,12,178,60,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845296220783581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21072060890364008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851669019679294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502948377283866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06491007280745519,0.0,0.051458718162574864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177177074180043,0.0,0.09215952745436984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272612572033903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881959098669171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14103612372481755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151087772613127,0.0,0.07112344093208131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04268285799285354,0.060306230773422835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4565327811824581,0.0,0.04410345425383845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036821006391237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790543338936689,0.13917714733728198,0.0,0.09522401461405852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649639973693994,0.08460620009117281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056347796847696065,0.0,0.1696128151599209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955117979116063,0.0,0.0,0.06737940171514974,0.0,0.062054879819654386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270896613486008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05720191948503221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.468182927909008,0.14741618103029766,0.0,0.0,0.07979964282276546,0.09516544653471523,0.0808464204159611,0.08588059912952653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848605846361286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081570684696143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209011361781988,0.0,0.06713034968170963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536514030372817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605065864648574,0.14304943824717456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17995072795972725,0.0,0.0,0.09669731841605968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346971956430883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408984716275854,0.08293749856065838,0.0,0.1476695337286733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05731237491411771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958053595229807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589939639844702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17989839343232322,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cchillur,2020/01/26,"Tampa, Florida, USA. I made the call to Baker Act my brother Thursday night and he gets out today. I’ve only talked to him briefly on the phone since he left Thursday night. He said this experience has been worse than his usual daily misery. He said he’s learned to not ask for help or at least find it himself before it’s forced on him like this again. 

He’s 35 and still lives at home with my parents. Hates his job, hates his commute, hates being and incel with no social skills. He said he goes to sleep every night praying to the god he doesn’t believe in to kill him in his sleep. 

My brother told me Thursday night that when our uncle fixed his car a few months ago and forgot his handgun in the car when he returned it to my brother that he had the thought to end his life as soon as he saw the gun. He did not put the gun to his head or even hold it really, he said he stopped himself and got out of the car when he thought how sad my parents and I would be and how we’d forever blame our uncle for the gun being available. 

My mom thinks he needs Jesus and my dad is just lost on what to do. Please let me know where to start with therapy and whatever else might help. Thanks in advance.",4.594126344086022,4.577629407258068,4.894290322580645,89.42060215053766,69.44354838709678,7.581075268817205,27.42043010752689,6.742157984588678,1.0269943010752691,935,27,208,6,15,295,141,248,0.17,0.7859999999999999,0.045,-0.9855,3,0,0,4,0,0,18.0,3,0,0,3,11,8,4,0,10,0,14,4,3,3,0,34,36,18,1,2,5,7,0,1,0,2,1,4,1,0,9,14,0,3,6,0,0,6,4,6,0,0,15,5,27,2,31,14,2,40,2,2,1,0,52,13,0,3,22,117,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382795977684566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895369100042767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006894242902247,0.11925456913112173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10808275111900296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884225107295345,0.0,0.09375000485050304,0.0,0.0,0.06991167597201636,0.0,0.08918159479778355,0.0,0.0,0.10353975867705856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967432516108386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05530126685243466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465640006281414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31350927368135023,0.1086306943024577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14189550901853035,0.0,0.10617428100387624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503791292930498,0.0,0.1171052469831634,0.0,0.058171351087084724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500427726505635,0.10823686017939697,0.07476364782086264,0.05171203817201865,0.0,0.09346581714108328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554571176735165,0.0,0.0,0.10015603753582976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228811380800896,0.0,0.12396802288173375,0.08448694864490329,0.0,0.0,0.07848502966777343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3973251098774525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050225458340256,0.0,0.0,0.2350635916628102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618943519100873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640658233266907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780900732842968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4027431524746611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875586473832671,0.0,0.21184909718852515,0.10789881466535944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491983447721708,0.0,0.08453043446685865,0.0884937564795243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507669843533817,0.0,0.09745071519261632,0.12104653437400754,0.0,0.0,0.0678231925948245,0.0,0.1680631461996541,0.0,0.0,0.10033162833291057,0.1011424016457598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657673504521494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786826323524216,0.0751914578259996,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nealm07,2020/01/26,"Ex Boyfriend took everything from me About a month and a half ago I was broken up with. He told me he wanted to marry me, that he loved me and all that. On the day he broke up with me he told me he loved me as he said bye and then came back and broke up with me not even 5 minutes later.  Saying he wasn’t in the place to be in a relationship and didn’t really love me. Throughout the entire relationship he made it so I felt like he was the center of my world. He made it so he was my sole support system. He convinced me to alienate myself from my family and friends so when I was sad he could step in and play the hero. He kept me from healing myself so I would be convinced that I needed him to be whole. He encouraged me to be vulnerable and told me to trust him with what I was struggling with the most. And then he left me. He took all of who I was with him when he did that. He convinced me he was my everything. He convinced friends I was crazy because I didn’t handle the break up well, I lost pretty much all of my friends in the process. Less than a month after he breaks up with me he releases a song about loving a girl in all the ways he didn’t love me and how she is his everything. So much for not being in the place to be in a relationship. He even made the cover photo for the song a picture of something I gave him. He took everything from me, and he gets to go on living like I never existed and never mattered to him. I just am not sure how I’m supposed to put the pieces back together when I don’t have anything left. My mom asked him when she could come to get my stuff and he blocked her. It’s like it’s all just a game to him and he continues to have the upper hand.",2.300383597883595,3.2139976565934103,3.8018437118437127,91.81723036223036,75.18131868131869,7.040944240944241,23.096866096866087,7.3871296695380915,0.6297355718355719,1313,35,311,15,27,436,146,364,0.064,0.754,0.182,0.9934,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,20,27,0,1,23,0,27,7,1,5,8,51,56,28,0,5,5,2,2,3,3,1,1,4,0,1,11,23,0,2,1,4,0,8,10,5,1,1,28,6,52,22,49,19,11,50,0,4,0,5,66,21,0,1,21,213,63,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884498745840793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319472415893677,0.0,0.08315221331091151,0.0,0.0,0.13678749055237588,0.0,0.054220467025051115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10173017389233216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661883609605047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14203179168524038,0.0,0.0,0.057362611719733524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749557868080544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197546034773753,0.0,0.08385008051433347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540181089185797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20615765823132426,0.0,0.0929409037942286,0.0,0.05054988534869129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932795047487384,0.0,0.0,0.1303631138570599,0.0,0.0785406737800252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709472759331833,0.0,0.4013847892245835,0.2524876873219105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041721170597803,0.14199120224183776,0.0,0.13077063266034228,0.06595210206580072,0.13720079882339642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18585862973016887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904897432245158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941498535686684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056980886561880516,0.0,0.0,0.2864831520098518,0.0,0.0,0.08460771949359938,0.07073318266105755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847473761116897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929853473079109,0.10182153491456776,0.0,0.1009345148929141,0.08383026014203485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549742552722897,0.2964658027882605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052462472431593965,0.07060094859546859,0.0,0.0,0.0799728572064641,0.0,0.0,0.09930468638736467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06318446615881061,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kianampj,2020/01/26,"Research survey, 18+, (Mod approved) I am a researcher at Western Carolina University studying how people from different communities react to unwanted sexual experiences. The purpose of the study is to help researchers understand how to best help individuals who have had such experiences. If you would like to answer questions about your own experiences, please follow the link below for more information and the survey questions. Some experiences may be difficult to discuss. The survey takes about 20-30 minutes. If you have any questions about this study, please contract Dr. David Solomon at [dsolomon@wcu.edu](mailto:dsolomon@wcu.edu). If you know anyone else that would like to participate feel free to forward this link.

[https://wcu.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_eECtLdQMxPzIurz](https://wcu.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_eECtLdQMxPzIurz)  


\*\*Additionally, the survey is completely anonymous (IP addresses are not recorded). \*\*\*information will be used for thesis.",12.469574209245742,16.800878189781024,8.844981751824822,51.982849756691024,55.42335766423358,11.281995133819953,39.88381995133821,11.038039088145766,5.898027250608274,820,39,87,23,12,232,97,137,0.031,0.813,0.156,0.9524,1,0,0,0,0,0,63.0,0,4,0,2,6,5,0,0,7,0,13,1,0,4,0,26,19,6,0,6,4,0,1,2,0,4,1,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,11,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,1,5,5,17,12,4,5,0,0,0,0,13,4,0,8,3,58,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068378233101684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352484059167573,0.15170181055927326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15537660260284078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552348631686313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15468796854228106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368255797230225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5793123085674179,0.0,0.0,0.07486202709917085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19847886443617727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136821092043857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466626442309966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026440258591682,0.0,0.0,0.3250440738498728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4975729026890309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132037753412877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541324746810504,0.0,0.1278736413499688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21035077526880971,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adeenom,2020/01/26,"I hope I don't wake up after tonight. I've had enough. For the past few years, and maybe even my entire life, I've never truly felt loved, or happy, for all I remember. 

My parents fought with each other again, despite me threatening suicide, which goes to show much they care about my mental health. They told me they'd bring me to see a therapist or smt even since my parents witnessed one of my mental breakdowns 2 months ago, but they never did. They always argued about money, so seeing a therapist isn't going to happen anytime soon. 

Everytime they fight, I feel like my whole world crumbles apart, and I have no control over it, which makes me feel awfully crippled inside. 

I want to build a strong support system of friends and not feel like a lonely crippling piece of shit, but God just had to give me the middle finger by giving me abusive parents who barely socialised with me, which made me have low self esteem, social anxiety, and social awkwardness. So that ain't happening anytime soon either.

I don't even know why I'm sharing all this. I guess I wish someone would swoop in and save the day. But that ain't happening either, coz people will eventually realise I'm a bad person and abandon me, like they always do. Forget therapy too coz you ain't got the money to afford one, nor can your parents do so too coz they are always arguing about lack of money.

Ive been dealing with so much anxiety, and stress from school, which would get worse when I'm an adult too. Not to mention that in 2 years time, I have to enlist in military service for 2 years of my life where I'll continue getting fucked and traumatised. And they say that life gets better.

At this point, I'm better off being dead anyways. A pathetic weakling like me ain't fit to be in this world. I already hit my head a couple of times earlier on, I'm already hearing ringing in my head, and my brain feels funny, like it's leaking or smt, and honestly I don't even care anymore, I hope I actually suffer a brain injury or smt and actually die in my sleep. I even took a painkiller with some alcohol in my stomach, as a cherry on top.

Anyways, I'm going to bed now. Part of me wishes I would go through the night okay, while another part deeply wishes that I don't so I don't have to suffer anymore. Goodbye?",5.494901805511558,5.920807789356989,6.050100570161548,80.37494179600887,67.55875831485588,8.571460247070004,30.51955970858409,8.418075326091056,2.2374269242952174,1807,65,342,24,28,587,236,451,0.19699999999999998,0.63,0.17300000000000001,-0.9645,5,2,1,0,1,2,53.0,0,2,9,5,25,34,6,2,16,2,30,16,9,6,4,61,76,28,3,10,12,4,6,5,1,4,5,3,1,3,16,17,1,2,7,1,3,5,16,14,0,2,10,11,53,20,46,58,15,49,0,5,2,2,35,22,2,8,26,224,69,2,0.0,0.08401442465595836,0.13839202405633802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285569329639029,0.0757791232346668,0.0,0.0,0.1564975562763773,0.0,0.17700349243228147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435325564450755,0.10848890299167152,0.0,0.1406434312259915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05920524608974506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542478659043624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15831363202166027,0.0,0.0,0.14459093172438378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952938893257777,0.0,0.07845839030620036,0.0,0.04572981549191685,0.07310306891272299,0.0,0.0,0.07359134377336664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326695345302194,0.0,0.2341704366792643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14341292901599412,0.10131342651163512,0.06808283196451334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05478337073880074,0.06555333431610474,0.1111395625497632,0.13604289376645842,0.1208960084363437,0.0,0.05671163191206765,0.0,0.07811319307373993,0.0,0.188111219374112,0.07548292012370195,0.0,0.0,0.14554419854995512,0.0753719237348921,0.07991850712291712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085535327231494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038969200771950964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025332304967648,0.17321041717213942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399726861176959,0.06709489572304872,0.04733166292940896,0.0,0.07123665027540267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429172399150156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05659811578768241,0.0,0.10425112671885976,0.0,0.10937729345714436,0.0,0.0,0.06654238593913961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609823714310624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31493991892918977,0.15357298055071147,0.06768974132728067,0.04915870223149419,0.06191415974724195,0.0,0.0,0.06703101110028226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032497918962822,0.0,0.0,0.05638891422953572,0.0,0.0717627154379441,0.1130090443112393,0.0,0.07397254334274274,0.0,0.07278607734773357,0.05865585800286751,0.0,0.07095924237119106,0.14456362086055993,0.060080146626295385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122491272937503,0.0,0.0,0.07756187974105118,0.0804655960466184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108951593212793,0.16465938411418524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269408904936727,0.0,0.0,0.06775566464651017,0.07878143419392843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04182339528521229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06398347113823667,0.07916628706106534,0.2446222171047685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226134391554613,0.1511130975093142,0.0,0.0,0.13698734616758634
mentalhealth,TLP1970,2020/01/26,EMDR? Thoughts?,7.329999999999997,-10.108978,2.500000000000004,78.92000000000003,329.0,0.4,51.0,3.1291,4.142200000000001,12,1,1,0,2,3,2,2,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VeKaRa1999,2020/01/26,"About eating... I need help. I've always been overweight, since childhood. When I was 15, I developed a mindset of a anorexic person. I avoided eating at all cause, until my mom put stop to it. I never had body of anorexic person, but I had the same mindset when it came to food.
Now, at 21, I started a diet. It hasn't been so good. I don't eat sugary cereal in the morning anymore or eat candy as much or junk food. These are good and healthy things, and because of those I want to continue the diet. But. My relationship with food and eating has changed back to it's former form in my head... I don't want to eat, I rather sleep actually. I only eat when it actually hurts due to feeling of hunger. I'm afraid to tell my mom that I'm starting to feel like that again, because I'm finally losing some weight...
Help me?",1.6134206586826352,3.6163777485029978,3.530924401197605,88.33794348802395,79.89820359281438,5.851646706586827,23.61115269461078,6.9077264865688965,0.8247607784431139,632,22,131,7,16,213,97,167,0.08800000000000001,0.754,0.158,0.9181,0,1,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,1,9,7,0,2,6,0,10,18,3,1,2,22,21,13,0,4,5,2,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,10,5,15,2,2,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,6,3,17,3,20,15,5,22,0,2,0,0,8,4,0,3,17,84,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.18676127715304147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962259995981721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489978565621382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358049296745367,0.0,0.11666472355090755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062911587955329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944504229787658,0.0,0.09830104384721326,0.10122841819469977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6854106680715465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676851670433713,0.06836168867781378,0.0,0.10482484253724407,0.0,0.0,0.3471299083849117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16052218652764402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982066003758278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282793563899021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243922333615646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046749802162169285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107053782191165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22414434816426396,0.0,0.0,0.07034391506092773,0.07095368388797668,0.07380281904571133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277733789690509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16710742728273256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619591198972599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273635143404433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915660622655146,0.0,0.0957601337318466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13546120259972896,0.0,0.0,0.08000198317929598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363817519052312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357286623183804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288209377099602,0.0,0.0,0.1165258913500098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WhisperingWoods321,2020/01/26,"I think I need help Location ( NZ, Christchurch )

I don't really know what I am doing with my life anymore. 

I have plans on what I want to achieve, like going to university in at least the next five years, and moving out in the next three, but otherwise I have nothing.

Since the year before there haven't really been too many moments where I felt happy, mostly just feelings of being sad or just.. empty. I'm not too sure what has been causing this, but it has lead to old friends of mine just drifting away and not knowing how to fix the relationships.

I want to be happy, but I don't know how to be happy anymore. Sometimes I think I might have depression or some other mental health problem but I've never been to a therapist, but I know it would benefit me greatly if I did go see one. 

I feel like I need help. But I don't know how to get the help I need.",3.2425830419580417,4.363887357954546,4.440000000000001,87.34346153846155,73.14772727272728,7.460839160839161,25.470279720279716,7.882392219407189,1.2688012237762236,669,21,143,9,13,220,101,176,0.091,0.701,0.20800000000000002,0.97,0,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,0,3,10,12,0,0,6,0,20,2,0,5,2,45,40,14,0,8,14,0,3,2,1,2,2,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,10,0,0,5,7,3,0,3,5,4,21,9,17,30,3,19,0,2,1,0,5,7,0,6,9,101,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408232559959016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407393225047308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331571416466148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472724402582315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10457505938553747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278272869368888,0.08673931315508357,0.11657799534747068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09380537434805168,0.0,0.06343462824127465,0.0,0.13800654195628384,0.0,0.0,0.13386110333628487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3877474213579004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905908172380434,0.0,0.0,0.2441469077294916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336341317775282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857594133988489,0.11863503690770108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309633912361224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235834533565094,0.12880274107158893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904554445923122,0.0,0.2700843378199081,0.09364317875622503,0.0,0.25825368918174946,0.0,0.0,0.11650152164951058,0.0,0.12740522477113456,0.0,0.08227433788600669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617831057638943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556385653032945,0.0,0.0,0.13035489221816682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967524959067846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043622076303076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008311119139405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443274533358995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409728441171938,0.0,0.15559639962206945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432281073007142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625014300014676,0.0,0.0,0.15637530288116386
mentalhealth,curious_ranga,2020/01/26,"Sleep Issues.... Depression... Fucked Thoughts... and Quetiapine is freaking evil I have had sleep issues, including occasional sleep paralysis, for as long as I can remember. 

About a year ago my psychiatrist put me on Quetiapine. I was on this and amytriptalyine (migraine prevention) every night as well as Desvenlafaxine 200mg every morning.

At the start every thing was freaking peachy. I was taking the Quetiapine, getting sleepy and heading to bed for a freaking great night sleep. 

About a month in I wasn't getting the real sleepy feeling anymore... But was still managing to fall asleep. I've always had vivid dreams but man they got really fucked up at this point. I remember one in particular I started to slash at my wrists... in the dream I could feel the pain, feel the blood running down my arm... it was beyond real... 

During the next few months my moods started to change. I became angry at everything. Anything. I was self harming. Having suicidal ideation constantly. My partner stopped an attempt. My thoughts were intrusive and smothering me. Making me believe that everyone hated me... I wasn't good enough... My partner didn't want me. I would scream and yell to try and cover the thoughts. It wasn't a voice... it was my own thoughts.... they wouldn't stop though. 

It got to the point where I was constantly exhausted. I was sleeping... But the dreams were so vivid it was like they were exhausting me. I was fighting every day to suppress and ignore those freaking thoughts that wouldn't shut the fuck up. 

One day it clicked.
This all began when I went on the Quetiapine. 
I didn't want to go to my doctor and tell him or my psych. I was scared that my behaviour and thoughts would have me committed. So I weaned myself off the quetiapine...

And I felt fucking amazing.
I was laughing again. Enjoying life. I found myself again. People commented on how happier I seemed. And for a while everything was peachy again.

I'm about a month off the quetiapine.
And it's 3:53am on night 3 of no sleep. I'm exhausted... But full of energy and can't lay still at the same time. The lack of sleep fuels my depression. And I'm terrified of losing this new sense of self and life enjoyment I've just found.

I don't want to go back on the quetiapine. It turned me into a monster... it honestly scared me where my thoughts went. I never want to look at that shit ever again.... But I don't want to be back where I was before I went on it... 

I don't know what to do... 😓",2.004161290322582,4.798670152688175,2.988198924731183,87.44229838709678,86.18279569892474,6.540860215053764,24.094086021505376,7.793537801064563,1.6243053763440858,1931,76,367,40,60,613,210,465,0.21600000000000005,0.6779999999999999,0.107,-0.9955,0,0,0,0,2,0,101.0,0,0,3,2,23,35,9,2,25,0,41,25,13,2,4,65,86,31,1,11,7,0,4,1,2,4,8,3,1,5,21,16,0,5,17,3,0,8,13,25,1,2,41,11,57,9,51,39,7,72,0,3,4,4,12,30,5,2,35,247,78,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057412364831408415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05389163946288157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423182659534389,0.0,0.0,0.05329802619810114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996042179106006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551122607271084,0.07297064592528807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851528861780068,0.0,0.0,0.13998103384686342,0.0,0.051711474024859184,0.0,0.0,0.08353918994465052,0.0,0.11156808013199432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629214666034305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066922005647057,0.0,0.0,0.05858579331575992,0.21827720730385955,0.061887996680539376,0.11641747017240313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824498351384796,0.0,0.06218683117646226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202815437298566,0.0,0.2395055561904129,0.0676765543175448,0.0,0.07361757680171829,0.05432379629971252,0.10360076329655746,0.07140625303649233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394436811597147,0.06647000604100282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520061241376802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03559445222181865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149421633012088,0.03164206499607065,0.0,0.0,0.05731708350700643,0.05438827793087441,0.07245811912567142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04323272177377342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550900881985497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04995258779998391,0.06255272862824454,0.06888083176407295,0.1823393652000174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777609093418537,0.0,0.0689170471178695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04490153873324943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224521968490832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510909477170634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474388907415795,0.04149163508249023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673760699971675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968687037397278,0.0,0.0,0.058961780299088225,0.13513298233382506,0.0,0.06648277360700396,0.0,0.0,0.453699002948772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752803152742668,0.0,0.10344660918794417,0.10829684124833827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708449895812188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048697001133867435,0.0,0.056609535294950525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0430285620956515,0.0,0.06363361125861453,0.3599263951328601,0.03776637374371225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043972792149327006,0.07044829911802633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19100736167846155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058233643032408425,0.18011999998270758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201776142588693,0.0,0.0,0.04170806219241648
mentalhealth,ns0urce,2020/01/26,"I dont know if i have an eating disorder I’ve recently been put on 30mg of prozac daily, but my appetite has taken a severe turn. I feel as though im malnourished and weak but i have almost no desire to eat for the past week and half(ish)? I’m getting scared for my actual psychical wellbeing and i definitely dont look great... Ive dropped 8 pounds, going from 118 to 110 in about a week. Im a relatively small dude but i havent dropped weight like this since i was almost hospitalized with the flu",3.0042307692307686,4.311914807692311,4.797307692307693,83.82269230769231,74.0,8.661538461538461,25.5,9.188382445141503,1.9217730769230768,396,13,85,9,8,135,74,104,0.207,0.728,0.065,-0.9286,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,6,0,9,6,0,0,0,13,17,9,0,2,4,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,2,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,3,3,10,2,11,14,0,11,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,3,5,45,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.16263392372898164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33376732674348314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19100422051828014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3906432845527348,0.0,0.0,0.3410649696413807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426716611154612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707179604335387,0.0,0.09471544018640132,0.0,0.0,0.18374075817869265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36003793810903434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915907411476954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142055864135968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399505365159715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909368048225025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16753707033987425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16455442278737664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16685348183833312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188275820718722,0.0,0.13786101333141748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637403936085367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18127577546647505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673655894739994,0.20294424213794224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsameMario10,2020/01/26,"How do I stop this from getting worse? Hello,
As Of recent, iv become somewhat worried about my mental well being. Over time, iv noticed changes in my behavior. I’ll try to write the most significant changes in order of occurrence. I ask you to for a solution to stop this from getting worse, as it’s starting to negatively impact my life.



I Ditched all my friends about 2 years ago, I’m growing colder with my family. I feel guilty, but can’t help it.

I Have stopped caring about personal hygiene and looks.

I’m Terrified of looking into a mirror. I will go insane. 

I’m Always tapping/fidgeting.

I Walk too fast.

Iv Started doubting my sexuality and gender identity.

My Voice has become monotonous. 

Iv Become hyper sensitive to slight sounds and movements.

I Talk to myself. 

I’m unable to articulate my thoughts.

Fear Of going insane.

I Mirror the personality of whomever I’m speaking to. 

Keeping Eye contact is difficult. It’s either too bold or nonexistent.

I’m Getting dumber by the day and have lost my ability to focus. My memory feels rotten, I can’t remember dates, names etc.

My Motor skills are becoming weaker, I bump into my surroundings regularly. I fail to throw and catch accurately. My clumsiness brings me close to falling down sometimes. 

While Talking to others, I start perceiving them as wax figures. There’s no genuineness in my interactions.



What should I do for things not to progress further? 
Thanks in advance.",3.223281086729361,6.298080509578544,4.765043538836647,74.98658307210033,82.9846743295019,7.4548241030999645,29.748171368861023,8.391295532112219,3.1131471264367816,1147,57,179,28,33,382,168,261,0.21899999999999997,0.69,0.09,-0.9894,0,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,1,5,8,11,0,2,5,0,12,6,1,1,1,31,37,12,0,1,4,0,2,0,1,2,5,3,0,2,8,9,0,4,6,0,0,10,5,6,1,0,2,9,32,5,38,32,5,36,0,2,3,0,15,11,0,4,14,116,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344732902325343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971035799603466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909855713939012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5155430298202998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898322095772737,0.0,0.2469058233564118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526171491034475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301511221621529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100141828568146,0.13131971641158002,0.11801384787969575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016197388988234,0.0,0.18291248241225064,0.0,0.13264636828085802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822141418865351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372814185163044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242851803980075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959968762354601,0.0,0.12739161429973778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760594757001044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328634926809656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037955233225956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11522697104263813,0.0,0.1321981210490069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541908351308852,0.0,0.2478021514897607,0.0,0.0,0.29269876798387223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18759775308307167,0.0,0.10744149422046456,0.0,0.0,0.0775301598109969,0.0,0.0,0.09264660354412343,0.06804859026715553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923150197523357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049271328342958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851430887780487,0.23785412673582795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515084329327007
mentalhealth,cantsbee,2020/01/26,"How do I talk with my parents about my suicidal thoughts? Hi, guys. This is my first reddit post, I hope you could give me some advice. I've been visiting a therapist for ten months and started with medication two months ago, but things are getting worse to the point that commiting suicide seems like an option. 
I was always an A+ student, but since I hoy depressed I cannot longer stand going to school. I think I've lost all my intelligence and it is making me feel so empty...
I've always been good at hidding my emotions and talking about them seems imposible. I don't want to worry my parents but I know that I need serious help.

Thank you for reading and I hope you'll have a good day :)",2.6448512071869743,4.8681292627737225,3.5929927007299263,88.07276810780462,77.54014598540147,6.55115103874228,25.13700168444694,7.61054688173877,1.3087096013475572,547,20,109,8,13,175,93,137,0.145,0.639,0.21600000000000005,0.9095,2,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,3,1,2,4,9,0,0,6,0,12,1,0,2,2,26,29,9,2,5,3,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,6,1,0,2,2,3,0,3,5,1,22,6,10,22,2,12,0,2,0,0,13,2,0,6,7,68,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520717580416,0.12265086259103312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23025897246968485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047196738241713,0.0,0.0,0.08923298784987703,0.0,0.11917224892231393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15564027395024518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996072482875801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769189191892168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228919927449844,0.1327308426235643,0.07863514526101499,0.2321054182298473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700158297661924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274211343989616,0.0,0.0,0.2748522794578143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604094137702283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675973995728264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510400657827988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235868672684616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393866335516124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22088079403254554,0.0,0.0,0.1025947554665976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30727250544250617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079819664117645,0.0,0.1325139514570028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840090726365198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400312125877731,0.0,0.2519218023790555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144556873495182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793437207483333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026943449518271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224226227301268,0.0,0.12738648806724925,0.0,0.16065064623567585,0.09192253746350383,0.08865772095244691,0.0,0.10984513518238766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351609994722151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816103560265976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051481416185674,0.14100419068542866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KostFtw,2020/01/26,"Mental worries  I was watching a youtube video and I ended up having a compulsion ""must not watch a specific dialogue in this scene""  I do not remember how this compulsion was created but some thoughts without my will popped up about a promise to an other God.    I closed the video but I started searching to find which video it was. I do not remember why. was it another compulsion or was I was searching to make sure to remember it in order to avoid clicking it in the future? I do not remember. the second scenario makes it more scary. and another scary scenario is how the compulsion was created. Was it created because I was carefree and these thoughts without my will about a promise to an other God pop up? or was there a compulsion telling me to watch the dialogue and because I did not want to, new thoughts without my will popped up? the new thoughts without my will are about a new fake promise to an other God about not doing the compulsion. they pop up due to frustration because I want relief from my ocd. since these new thoughts without my will force me not to do the compulsion, for a second, maybe I act as if they matter in order to trick my ocd and I feel relieved. But I cant remember or understand why I end up in this situation. I know these thoughts without my will that relieve me, will give me more worries later but I cant control them. I reminded myself many times not to have these thoughts withoug my will and not feel relieved. and if they pop up, to pray to an other God to tell Him that they are without my will but instead of that, I maybe act as if they matter. are they still 100% thoughts without my will or not? I worry because I accidentally saw some seconds of that video and i freaked. another reason I worry is because these days, my thoughts without my will that create compulsions are very scary. sometimes, they have the word God as if they are addressed to Him. I tried to forget these scary thoughts without my will to avoid being in a situation like I am now. I try not even think the word promise and now I worry? I have prayed to an other God many times and asked Him to protect me from these thoughts without my will and no matter what not to accept promises. the new scary thoughts without my will are about promises and punishments that scare me. I tried to forget them but I cant. I tried not to end up having compulsions but I failed. I overpayed and still overpay and I still worry. how could I end up worrying? I overpray and try not even think the word promise. i keep reminding myself not to have new thoughts without my will that relieve me but I cant stop it. and i cant remember how much strong or how much scary they were. if they were not that strong or scary, I do not think I would try to find the video to make sure to ignore it on the future. it does not make sense. maybe it was just an other compulsion. most of the times, I remember the scary thoughts without my will or how much strong they were, but in this case I do not remember them. perhaps they were just not so scary or strong thoughts? how could I forgot them? It is like, for a second, I forget about the worries I will be having in the future. Maybe my system allows the new thoughts without my will that force me not to do the compulsion,  on purpose, due to frustration, but sometimes these thoughts without my will, automatically are accompanied with scary thoughts without my will about punishments. And I am like "" now i do not have to do the compulsion. i am relieved and free. oh wait. were the thoughts 100% without my will or not? I dont know"" I end up confused and more worried. the same case has happened more than 15 times, probably. I try to forget them. i try not to make compulsions. i try not even think the word promise and I always end up worried.                ocd: too bad. you are allowing yourself to have new thoughts without your will in orde to force yourself not to do an old compulsion. maybe you mean them for a second. and you are so unlucky that these new thoughts without your will are accompanied with scary punishments. maybe if you meant them for a second, maybe the other God made those promises valid.               I pray to an other God, not Jesus, just to be sure.             ocd: maybe the other God accepts the thoughts without your will.",3.8891871356638816,5.705497453446193,4.2628165099532564,86.48504358497719,72.65175332527207,7.258957931022036,29.876536302766706,7.964452647313387,1.988144052410258,3362,145,657,48,67,1054,204,827,0.157,0.688,0.155,-0.9173,0,2,0,0,0,0,84.0,0,7,19,6,31,43,6,4,47,0,91,0,0,17,4,194,140,58,0,12,76,0,2,3,0,26,0,0,1,0,46,24,0,9,46,5,1,2,55,15,0,6,43,7,118,29,103,66,11,63,4,1,5,0,33,23,0,19,38,520,164,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02380406834203941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999364696393831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0267445289990796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023886405371352837,0.08719556551508123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032086197566005496,0.045682167921544455,0.0,0.0,0.018449731781222976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02503497008325161,0.0,0.03352825110724002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15202867309177756,0.0,0.0,0.05668575350260861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02893003225403733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052294213020515706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02744330885367584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025297875541065187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02542802004454704,0.0,0.0,0.03144431239169146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04192913141017912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027069491023819683,0.09547999225595012,0.05800785011195254,0.2299238825149035,0.031162394782261918,0.0,0.0,0.02883003916570368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309030460203463,0.0,0.0,0.2486672325947727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030019183489210507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030844159717372536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029413690548050868,0.0,0.0,0.2592574328917483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0286415031739154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02366475429453006,0.06431296674433871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05658789826375225,0.0,0.02024882210582236,0.0,0.06853892865584754,0.02391748920607617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088783451810423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050009139094765336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332316047330077,0.0,0.4996525754570543,0.06672599687716091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17480600403898255,0.0,0.0,0.029781837579754555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023604517340664717,0.033747366653102934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051628368417132496,0.0,0.0,0.5791169819335689,0.0,0.0,0.29052715761755377,0.0,0.02032223461277281,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shibani11,2020/01/26,"Can't find psychologists in Bangalore, India. I started noticing mental health Issues 1.5 years back. Tried talking to someone over a vacation, but things moved to fast with her and I could not be honest. Thought will work on it once I move to a bigger City after college. Turns out India has only 4000 psychiatrists and psychologists for 1.3 billion people. So now in one of the major cities yet can't find someone with enough reviews. 

https://m.timesofindia.com/life-style/health-fitness/health-news/we-need-more-mental-health-care-professionals-in-india/amp_articleshow/66146320.cms

https://www.thenewsminute.com/article/there-are-less-4000-psychiatrists-india-medical-education-blame-78952",18.92842592592592,25.339582629629632,10.50195987654321,37.802569444444494,43.691358024691375,7.50679012345679,29.878086419753085,8.472884824447931,2.7913567901234564,607,16,56,7,8,152,67,81,0.046,0.9540000000000001,0.0,-0.5504,0,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,3,0,6,1,0,0,0,11,9,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,1,0,4,1,13,5,2,15,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,7,39,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203978637638776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14855812641995775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633528427789072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15055441172793346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663473479751873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6195194479314771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208038425030615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291725257561374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2936770258228558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3097272326502773,0.0,0.10803998811129137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658885293524585,0.0,0.1551733344422664,0.09873491990115676,0.1108168355792087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101497533286603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24691435102865755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313225414428363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171138690577069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968013404734912,0.0,0.0,0.11567518286109844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892557448131044,0.1584875128651255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607652351425106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383061232217367
mentalhealth,LaneSwitchaaaaa,2020/01/26,My mind is.... unstable I really don't have much else to say. I'll break down any day now,-3.151499999999998,-2.0207591499999977,0.5200000000000031,100.24000000000002,115.5,6.0,10.0,7.1686216300943375,-0.3984999999999999,67,1,18,2,4,24,19,20,0.135,0.865,0.0,-0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326579370107147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31547945737626193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4086455993876512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4939305127408351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3596022478370073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31338006820871983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3890141228825855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Death_N0va,2020/01/26,I'm close to suicide I've had suicidal thougths for many days now and I keep fucking up EVERYTHING I do and dissapoint everyone. I can't take it anymore for long. My energy is super low all the time and I sleep very bad which makes things worse. I've been thinking of hanging myself when I'm home alone.,1.4587327188940122,3.903919112903228,3.0900921658986182,88.68370967741936,83.6774193548387,6.768663594470048,24.98617511520737,7.957251820313856,1.621236866359448,243,10,50,5,7,80,50,62,0.282,0.634,0.085,-0.9324,0,1,0,0,0,3,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,1,0,1,0,5,2,1,1,1,8,12,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,0,6,1,5,10,1,9,0,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,5,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372216384036042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271511845111439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19124308417859495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477151355867277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21886240043538333,0.20585095932309247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21174849630384127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297509019648977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035858013071513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20269769834452195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15288937713730255,0.23221577272744665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292105051209905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5010763091460965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221340379101646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15216738127990673,0.14676284619465435,0.0,0.0,0.1335580347826612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18898618802600434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334165161031712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shortyninja,2020/01/26,"Feeling alone. I’m having a really rough morning and everything’s getting on top of me. It feels like nobody has any time for me - not deliberately, they’re just busy. But it still makes me feel shitty. Especially on top of everything else.",3.0613333333333337,5.868421355555558,4.7022222222222245,77.38000000000002,79.8888888888889,8.044444444444443,24.555555555555557,8.841846274778883,2.326688888888888,191,7,34,5,5,64,38,45,0.11599999999999999,0.726,0.158,0.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,8,8,2,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,5,8,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,3,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178038842483937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20866840767136496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563336600124023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5515536853162796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.465457483663351,0.21921358085345444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160316372139298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991132803139284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20482464517795895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965758593246824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450506717187228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789266043019915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maizemachine10,2020/01/26,"Never Feeling Fulfilled- How to Overcome It? 
Hi guys! I'm 27, have a really good job that I've worked at for five years with a great boss. In the last semester of my masters and graduate in May. I got married last year and she's the best wife a guy could ask for. Decent but smaller friend group since college, engaging church on weekends and I'm in decent shape and enjoy outdoors stuff. My question is this, I feel like nothing ever really gets me super excited or that I never feel fulfilled as I picture it in my head. I'm not a sad person or a downer and I'm super happy with how my life is.... and yet I feel like I've never found my purpose... I'd like to become a manager in higher education or private sector IT and use my skills and knowledge I've acquired. I want to buy a house and have kids in the next five years. My wife and I have plans on trips to take. Yet I feel like I'm sleepwalking through life because nothing is as fulfilling or exciting as I think it should be. I'll occasionally buy stuff I don't need and then wonder why I did it (not too often). I'm a go-getter and want to be really good at everything I do and to everyone I know. One example is I'll buy books that look interesting and I love the topics, but I never feel like sitting down to enjoy them. A lot of this I realize sounds like depression and maybe to some extent it is, but it's more to me like I don't know what brought me here or what to do with my time... I have hobbies like reading, walking, podcasts on sports, business, leadership, and video games, I love to fish, etc... My wife and I also have a ton of the same interests so that's always been good too. I'd bet 9/10 people would say you've got everything going for you.

Yet... here I am posting this haha. Does anybody have suggestions for how to fix what I'm feeling/thoughts? I've felt this way since the late teenage years. Thanks.

TLDR: Never really feel fulfilled, not necessarily in a sad pointless way (generally pretty happy) but just like I lack a purpose or haven't found my calling.",2.988414918414918,4.466939653846153,4.58694055944056,84.62927156177159,74.33653846153847,7.542424242424243,26.54836829836829,8.199878495009871,1.6800169871794877,1600,58,327,26,33,538,198,416,0.037000000000000005,0.69,0.273,0.9989,1,0,0,0,0,0,59.0,0,1,1,8,15,33,0,0,18,1,25,5,1,5,6,76,61,36,0,7,14,3,8,9,1,3,2,2,0,4,20,20,0,0,17,6,4,4,11,3,0,3,8,11,38,30,39,47,9,42,1,3,1,2,21,14,0,13,29,202,58,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414978821114273,0.06674726377289171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499239650688957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04889975383731361,0.08859376402946086,0.0,0.0,0.08418316295450096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191088624917185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404702902385516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690910885939409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019874618416104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946355309291999,0.0,0.07256118831724354,0.0,0.07665111842917632,0.14418836886048325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28392212756458995,0.2292291720411596,0.07702123863933515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17590837424124195,0.06197572793886795,0.0,0.04191025609255107,0.0,0.09117874063730824,0.201847529425738,0.1283142903750602,0.08843991487294339,0.0,0.1588555824455101,0.0,0.17078572780497228,0.0,0.0,0.08232614688332758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925600551722544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960334511035609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817071868588078,0.13077569832246727,0.09048866820422988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331977746356828,0.35271132066036864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06736237326210506,0.0,0.0,0.06819792491960723,0.1447985859513584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058911303202675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948015081797421,0.3093428393768316,0.0,0.085312064959898,0.0,0.0,0.15394142735200686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05435735443317435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05561261226244873,0.07004269851071739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682605004808862,0.08160988665841114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986179396195416,0.0,0.08023906095342914,0.0,0.2055571616541399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379205879317475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271324668717038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836593546993744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060313466282089966,0.0,0.0,0.07385336109971953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05140004076666764,0.0,0.06368361791550221,0.046775383624270736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928203736611384,0.0,0.0,0.0946285463168925,0.12734560199948744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238368407001335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699229748365539,0.05839918836694721,0.0,0.0,0.056984106021816375,0.0,0.0,0.20662938120714136
mentalhealth,ldpe1,2020/01/26,"I should have been happy I was looking forward to the Party at my place yesterday. They all laughed and had fun; I laughed with them. But it was just a reflex that honestly hurt and didnt bring any joy. Come to think of it, laughing almost never brought real joy. I mean, I always knew something was wrong with me, I didnt exactly fit between the others(thats edgy), lots of anger issues and bullying as kid, feelkng disproportionate emotions, being clingy etc. 

Is that normal?",5.087305194805194,7.102295068181817,5.135584415584418,80.63409090909094,69.9090909090909,7.755844155844157,30.75324675324676,8.418075326091056,2.451942857142857,378,16,66,6,7,118,69,88,0.205,0.595,0.2,-0.1164,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,0,1,11,1,0,3,0,11,0,0,0,3,19,18,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,3,0,0,4,3,3,0,0,9,1,10,8,9,7,3,9,0,1,1,0,3,4,0,2,3,46,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391484993874387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19872133251543705,0.0,0.0,0.16240902673014673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20572638410543947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686457105295421,0.0,0.0,0.26635273833368694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542333983869349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25566684551221475,0.0,0.0,0.2492710012493887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20055264919315546,0.0,0.0,0.2030402708480187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601501779662861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18419637830918556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23399755790582705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495210433714116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27183486274290075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18385896848726327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15302926315083407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611173841715229,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SimpleTortoise,2020/01/26,"So what do I do with this fear, perfectionism, and other stuff I mentioned here? I don't have all the answers right now, but somehow and some point, I noticed that I avoid my responsibilities and requirements out of fear at times. Fear that would lead to thinking about anything that could go wrong or finding more details that would maybe lead to a catastrophe. It doesn't help that I also get overwhelmed with the amount of school work I get and the amount of things to remember. Sometimes it's tempting to self-diagnose to explain why I feel this way, but thankfully I have enough mind to not do that. Still, I get the feeling I need help. Maybe just coaching or just social support? I don't know atm.



I remember several times where I pressure myself to be perfect that I end up flopping. Examples of this would be:
1. Reporting, in which I keep telling myself that it has to be perfect which either ends up me speaking too fast, stuttering, or stammering.
2. Paper or essay writing, in which I take a long time to think of the perfect beginning sentence or the perfect paraphrase. Then I read the stuff I wrote, which sometimes leads to me worrying too much that what if this is all wrong. What if this is bad writing.
3. Conversing and socializing with others, in which I worry so much of what to say that when it's time to actually say something, nobody understands because I made it needlessly more complicated since I force myself to speak in common language (Cebuano, a language in the Philippines) rather than sticking to what I know and comfortable to convey my thoughts in (in this case, English).*
4. Decision making and planning, in which I take up so much time in thinking what could go wrong to the point that so much time is wasted. Sometimes I just stop and procrastinate in order to avoid doing such.




There are other areas in which perfectionism leaks to other areas, but they're still sort of manageable. The ones listed above are the ones I need to get worked on. I'm not sure what I need here. I already have an ebook that tackles perfectionism, which is ""The CBT Workbook for Perfectionism"". That's where I noticed that my perfectionism was so bad since I made more than 5 bullet points on where I notice perfectionism in my life.



With all that said, there are moments I could still pull through through shit and something good happens. However, I'm worried that dealing with this sadness and anxiety has been harder in the last 3 - 4 months. It doesn't help that I have frequent thoughts of wishing I never existed in the first place. I also frequently felt feelings of worthlessness and emptiness in the last 4 - 5 months, which vary from somewhat manageable to being overwhelmed by such thoughts.



Part of the reason why I feel worthless is due to my mother. As much as I appreciate her helping me, there are times I felt invalidated by just dismissing my feelings and telling me something along the lines of, ""You can handle it"" and ""Just stop overthinking"". As if this is easy to handle by myself. I understand the intention and I get that some of these thoughts are irrational, but don't invalidate me please. It's hard enough to try to get out of this thinking pattern, how much more to stop it entirely? I can be able to at times, but definitely not all the time.




So what now with this? I need answers.



*Context: I live in the Philippines, but my parents decided that I learn English first before our local language and national language since apparently it's easier to learn. I know how to communicate with others through English, however with the stigma that speaking in English makes you some intelligent arrogant person, it made me resort to speaking in local language which I got better using over time. That being said, I still struggle with such.",6.893540222367562,7.8251393007194325,6.546917920209289,76.25786543492481,64.62589928057554,9.426095487246569,35.21991497710922,9.457814108942452,3.3233669064748206,3014,135,524,54,44,941,282,695,0.158,0.735,0.107,-0.9913,4,2,3,0,0,0,87.0,1,2,0,14,38,30,1,9,25,0,42,2,1,13,10,132,95,44,0,15,24,2,8,0,0,3,1,8,0,1,69,27,0,7,31,2,1,6,9,20,0,4,15,16,68,10,94,68,24,87,0,5,0,0,30,41,1,14,38,395,137,15,0.05611707311175493,0.0,0.05476216837195707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06192658561824329,0.08975360618586065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0429294073313089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046179569686465805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371082407321107,0.034208446909084436,0.0,0.04775149600036874,0.0,0.0,0.049630990861772084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441474977581416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05785423828580787,0.0,0.0569576479533222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994061406945274,0.11596787512729433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894419261771852,0.14187239147344707,0.0,0.10776238103902754,0.0,0.05128998817764585,0.0954663074428773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591312732468278,0.0,0.06378525173573532,0.04706833846963968,0.044881949759659895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049624142423244894,0.0,0.05026987499165122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045636483870453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049879433005487736,0.0,0.0,0.0925214273819176,0.09148580886411126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039637148317848266,0.0,0.0,0.04955240367011906,0.04966184380259628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929799429721794,0.0749171641166211,0.0,0.11275428517608024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056662246663558964,0.0,0.08958422473939212,0.0,0.2475150339019688,0.16644039462205906,0.04328094629160663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916689790375677,0.0,0.0,0.07605276212358471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06231136868274216,0.06076932161117703,0.0,0.0,0.04899926370477031,0.0586303974916165,0.061599694635925725,0.15914631819483396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05613225918870933,0.0,0.0,0.05769769744421273,0.0,0.0,0.12713940893199666,0.0479236738189605,0.1067603744194335,0.08925309782571272,0.0,0.05679347393664425,0.0,0.0,0.0585423459344462,0.06339631952647606,0.05760336912520692,0.13926186832762907,0.0,0.0,0.1144085780955552,0.0,0.12960499354069993,0.1665036606521088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17926066830570386,0.14074915763287507,0.0,0.05866574913926517,0.12848124564169391,0.0,0.0636809895498164,0.05288967728954808,0.0,0.08438611024824233,0.0,0.09809759071958843,0.05166506135475446,0.0,0.0,0.037281689840051764,0.14383021816765218,0.0,0.17820275085135734,0.32722316613011976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038099809021458084,0.0,0.0,0.11683970436842925,0.0,0.048467133492672634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044543120601363166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012738600619926,0.0,0.06453186461651082,0.0,0.0,0.08170779515294528,0.17096883519761705,0.0,0.11959187598331893,0.1840656301259467,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,accidentally-alive,2020/01/26,"Relationships with Borderline & Avoidant Personality Disorder? I have been reading a lot lately of articles lately on personality disorders and I literally have all traits associated with Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) & Avoidant Personality Disorder (APD): I find it very hard to build and keep stable relationships and have a massive fear of people abandoning me. I feel like I don't really have an identity or an interesting personality and I try to tailor myself to the person I am talking to, often lying to seem more interesting. I feel socially inept and inferior, and I'm constantly afraid of being 'exposed' (like people finding out I'm no fun to be around). This makes social interactions often feel forced and plain. I feel lonely and I avoid any type of intimate relationship as I feel like rejection is inevitable. Even if rejection would not be immediate, I feel so socially inadequate and insecure about physical intimacy anyways.

I am already 27 years of age and I'm kind of afraid my personality disorders will never allow me to be in a relationship or feel comfortable enough around someone to not feel lonely. I have been seeing a therapist for quite some time but honestly have not been making any progress in tackling these issues. Are healthy intimate relationships even possible with these personality disorders? Any suggestions on steps I can take to overcome these issues?",8.80548319327731,10.670590420168072,9.745703781512605,51.68477415966387,60.764705882352935,13.849159663865548,40.505252100840345,12.920253819902944,6.586721848739498,1152,61,158,47,16,394,134,238,0.138,0.763,0.099,-0.3525,0,7,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,9,22,0,7,7,0,21,0,0,3,2,49,38,16,0,2,7,0,9,3,0,2,0,0,0,8,5,16,0,5,11,1,0,1,6,13,0,0,3,10,19,9,28,29,5,15,0,6,1,0,19,7,0,8,10,110,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768258586019132,0.0,0.0,0.1508634525944169,0.0,0.14202911027021525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395063175302005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768219223978375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523297641677733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4787336969286287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193462620252385,0.0,0.09196486020675328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834028249451856,0.2816100562442348,0.09947108651220636,0.0,0.0,0.12726028215800084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06236459300134115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453274662392669,0.0,0.06188021233475378,0.0,0.0724970608959053,0.0,0.0,0.15706563110040986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203639725500682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05918724592708598,0.0,0.0,0.09294191500821727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05369415779604055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652954580378707,0.4863062243653314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848451348910368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404795286452133,0.06963744189001936,0.0,0.04459945919629973,0.0,0.0,0.3737216231450719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05547701232893393,0.06337816066689818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21290219271411864,0.05898761564484194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052344524642959266,0.055956795268287736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083256290017861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04059516674689237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04726646094597761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05744263778858168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04945505748194267,0.0,0.0,0.044832097221746026
mentalhealth,elijahproto,2020/01/26,"I don't know who I am. I've got so much things on my plate but this one is what holds me down from being great.
I am completely apathetic towards everyone but it's just a display, I want to love, I want to be loved, but the way I grew up was the ""be a man, there's no room for emotions here"" mentality where everyone in my family teases me for doing anything cutesy or in that line. Can I have advice on what to do to change this, please. 

Because if not I'll probably lose myself.

Where do I start?

Do I do small things like do the dishes for my mom? Or start showing more affection to my family?

I've been homeschooled almost my whole life, I'm extremely sheltered and introverted but I can still be and like to be social, should I try to kindle a relationship with my neighbors?",2.6807211538461537,4.212161437500004,4.4025,85.42019230769233,75.25,7.9230769230769225,24.18269230769231,8.617729084823388,1.5174086538461533,610,19,130,12,13,206,100,160,0.05,0.708,0.242,0.9889,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,1,0,6,0,21,4,0,1,0,19,30,10,0,4,9,1,0,2,1,1,1,0,2,1,9,3,1,1,1,1,0,1,3,2,0,1,3,0,20,5,19,21,3,16,0,1,0,2,9,11,0,4,5,97,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872946557230666,0.0,0.0,0.16265504896199445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367004971147506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901878319645346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718345441442214,0.0,0.17030986061231926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18271735474626866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31042694009280325,0.0,0.0,0.3062582599894574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991399651954627,0.17908500696857238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892699512034225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473254562657174,0.158714935719296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18172305949058853,0.0,0.0,0.2932076066716302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636961341342713,0.0,0.0,0.19024174523417864,0.0,0.0,0.119408312343334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100700652125606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17830469837853608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17513225276364847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439425045400797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655818842107365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299444603903847,0.0,0.1297206892919486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158290069865267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028260766554077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916165783394604,0.12893323141626092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813527206845928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beingmimeris,2020/01/26,"Presentation Hi so yesterday I joined a design thinking course and we have to work in groups and all.
At first the teacher told us to all make a circle and introduce ourselves and when he said that I started panicking for no reason.
When my turn came to introduce myself, I was stuck , I couldn’t breath and I felt a lot of pressure in my stomach, it was terrible..
Idk what I have because it always happens it’s not first time ... can anyone help?",3.0099137931034505,5.200684057471263,4.113318965517242,84.9417025862069,76.24137931034483,7.108620689655173,26.96695402298851,8.07648339933343,1.846633333333333,351,14,67,6,8,114,64,87,0.127,0.841,0.032,-0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,2,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,4,0,6,2,2,2,2,16,16,8,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,2,0,2,7,2,11,0,8,8,3,12,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,1,8,49,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20569837640331207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172854856241399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150696813656385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827421802029373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373601978740245,0.0,0.0,0.4205530985202942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21860683016356766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656995334790702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101689513111623,0.0,0.0,0.16501447654949125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25417287090703866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23515315226864034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17497638518753744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584020727612447,0.0,0.0,0.14415003587101682,0.0,0.0,0.2362195799370441,0.0,0.0,0.26889329946872,0.0,0.0,0.2973629790727435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17997169548740294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,newbietherapist,2020/01/26,"How to help people close to you suffering from depression? So, I’m not sure whether this belongs in this sub. But I was wondering if there are other people here with  depressed partners, very close friends, or relatives, who would like to share their experience? Or if you are or were depressed, what kind of behaviour from partners, friends and relatives was helpful? 

Some background information: My ex-boyfriend has been suffering from depression (he's not been diagnosed with it, but he shows clearly all the symptoms) for quite some time now, I think. He’s been through a lot more recently and is really miserable right now. We’ve been friends since our breakup, which wasn’t always easy. However we’ve still been very close and I am the person who is closest to him at the moment, he moved to this country about 3 years for work, which amongst other things is not going that well. So we talk a lot and he often turns to me for help and we kinda started seeing each other before things got worse for him....But I find it hard that he still struggles to except actual help or advice, even if he asked for it or brought up a problem, or just withdraws completely again, which sometimes leaves me helpless. I think I may find it even harder as I’m a therapist myself. It’s difficult to be there as a friend, while being a mental health professional.  I often worry about asking too many questions or suggesting things...Basically, about behaving more like a therapist than a friend. I feel like there have been situations, where I made him feel worse or not very supported, which is the last thing I want to do. I feel like I push him away at times by wanting to fix things and wanting to see him too much. Sometimes it’s really difficult though to be there for him and try to be supportive, while not knowing what to do, what would be good/helpful for him at the moment. And it’s difficult , because of course I have wishes and needs too and I sometimes don’t know what I can ask for at the moment, or how. Above all our relationship is at a very difficult stage, where we're more than friends, but not dating or in a full relationship. There've been some situations more recently, where I couldn't control myself anymore and let all the frustration out and we had some really bad arguments. I want to learn to control myself better again and be useful without making him feel week or guilty for needing help.",7.188588614029138,7.332246852422912,6.788722466960355,77.49171467299225,63.95594713656389,10.332633005760758,33.7610979329041,10.035473477838034,3.22128729244324,1917,74,355,38,26,599,213,454,0.156,0.703,0.142,-0.8491,1,0,0,0,0,0,56.0,5,2,1,5,32,33,1,2,17,0,38,3,0,7,5,97,71,40,0,14,27,0,5,4,8,3,3,0,0,3,29,23,0,2,14,1,0,4,10,16,1,0,15,7,38,17,53,45,16,44,0,8,2,0,48,19,0,26,24,258,67,3,0.0,0.0,0.06854695907353979,0.0,0.0,0.06864057028204185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058447738031925725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06966210365046488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970029495291965,0.0,0.06599553734448141,0.0,0.05864990570555565,0.04281943319554805,0.0,0.05977155286848985,0.0,0.0,0.06212415615600901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364836714428036,0.0,0.15756681948912854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24200050268543202,0.07129508708754469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09278957482550873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871105614050514,0.0,0.0,0.142067727427325,0.10036311482612617,0.0,0.0,0.12840151604719172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3256170431106128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039920671242666385,0.058916430204580775,0.05617968142568143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292386087197466,0.0,0.0,0.0746649412316764,0.0,0.0,0.2824940991991533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314719384672193,0.07720734568795817,0.057257356515024775,0.0,0.07437711197409326,0.0,0.07182814670695571,0.0,0.13726857405800785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943604051200064,0.0,0.06646555106815942,0.046887695787786114,0.07121529770503382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707883439248621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746571094770235,0.051636629822387634,0.10416847303095904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739519522017537,0.06133340997367157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721298970765575,0.0,0.0,0.07868814833276032,0.07471199377187432,0.0,0.0,0.1349982432518845,0.0,0.13871282233801516,0.15082922079920147,0.0,0.05998707146892615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119490286837466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05810567083416805,0.15791197447078967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084161374836877,0.0,0.04971830163191238,0.0,0.1121921762701682,0.0,0.0,0.07343315330309387,0.0,0.0,0.15942167062431756,0.06620312256364028,0.0730092913485299,0.0,0.056458599837692976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631148925078882,0.1866651042961324,0.09001765608796702,0.06901331408614071,0.0,0.08191842523212282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047690333077478095,0.0764041282225446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066733138411134,0.0,0.2318310678785456,0.16572438098108033,0.0,0.0563446349295733,0.0,0.0631568225892843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077589354683717,0.06771167004998481,0.07617545239637266,0.0511376837043419,0.07133509682293225,0.14316707679516236,0.09979711264506604,0.0,0.0,0.04523413867415639
mentalhealth,Air091,2020/01/26,"How long should symptoms be present to get a BPD diagnosis? So my therapist wants to diagnose me with BPD because I meet enough of the criteria.But for me it feels like I'm being misdiagnosed, which makes me feel extremely misunderstood.

In my eyes my symptoms are merely a result of an ongoing (like a bit over 1.5 yrs) crisis period in which a lot has happened. My ex has ended his life, my sister got hospitalised for mental illness which re-invoked lots of feelings of emotional neglect. So as a result of that, next to having depression, I guess I'm kind of acting out, stuck in impulsive cycles. I don't have a history with many interpersonal issues or mentalisation problems but I do struggle with it a bit right now.

My question is, could they think I have BPD based on my current behaviour even though I've never really shown traits of it before all of that shit happened in the past few years? I've had a history with mental illness for about 7 yrs though but mostly ed/depression related stuff. I'm 23 btw.",6.3916323024054975,7.0098738505154685,7.320154639175258,71.37531786941582,65.64948453608248,10.796563573883162,33.692439862542955,10.686352973137794,3.7853862542955334,813,34,143,21,12,273,125,194,0.13699999999999998,0.847,0.016,-0.9668,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,0,8,8,1,1,11,0,14,8,2,4,2,28,29,9,0,4,3,2,3,2,0,1,6,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,5,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,3,4,17,3,27,22,8,19,0,2,1,0,6,8,1,6,12,95,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320632237893808,0.0,0.10218854482257247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622164063939679,0.0,0.453751004834263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588284369963043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068683012984948,0.12188977620348113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508614369905955,0.10636492795873052,0.12408604334964178,0.0,0.07931893326400963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18216476277590896,0.08579299152983261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274255957816285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604769523250192,0.0,0.1322937095800214,0.0,0.21239204326751654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534374075211765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250562339161123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482378243157268,0.11734073451061525,0.0,0.0,0.10627670285668148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20419404538718855,0.0,0.0,0.0801616349700566,0.12175336413955135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24204684365478185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262153629802597,0.0,0.12771807708981914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146403908011348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491081094231935,0.0,0.0,0.1345293369004396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076933331266945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255700659249234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327162415470586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554512502438245,0.13747539479197468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496409373150689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13943483734599982,0.0,0.07694942529105267,0.2359774776259395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07083274785975155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733462802254405
mentalhealth,LeastAssociate6,2020/01/26,"Randomly lost my anxiety and gained my confidence 2 hours ago Was on the verge of an anxiety attack (Only had one before but I was getting out of touch and worked up at the same time). And then I imagined someone telling me I'll be fine. For 10 minutes straight I helplessly smiled and felt like myself again. I haven't felt like this in a long time and I can safely say my anxiety/inhibitions/lack of self satisfaction just disappeared in one go. I'm really interested in what this phenomenon is. I've been dealing with these issues for the last two years and now they are suddenly gone. During the 10 mins of helpless happiness I felt like weight was coming off me, I felt very calm like I was put into a trance. It was really weird and I'd like to know as much information as possible if anyone knows of what this is experience most likely was, I'm not religious either.",3.4680701754385943,5.570230777777778,4.934362573099417,79.99031578947371,74.55555555555556,9.004444444444445,26.019883040935675,9.558583805096642,2.51482269005848,697,25,134,19,15,233,115,171,0.09300000000000001,0.654,0.253,0.9878,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,3,3,16,1,0,7,0,14,1,0,0,0,28,27,12,0,1,5,0,6,6,0,0,0,1,0,1,7,11,1,1,8,0,0,5,2,5,0,3,14,7,15,11,20,12,4,28,0,3,0,0,6,11,0,3,18,84,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966009271328132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065332750230141,0.0,0.0,0.09438783316055284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535701026993812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148661659837527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628154593433722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916830035544586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204568395469932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5184445549993975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052646923648911,0.0,0.07671767302469275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14369888782676266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293751677747545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408940205113566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14837345458416634,0.1100345013909274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3956944580340434,0.0,0.0,0.11946150531585804,0.0,0.0,0.14735704171322433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923285254224697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18294482747813975,0.10266563687400226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521804369058736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13570178374882105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17295552675371728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734910953714692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082354247356854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437620903535413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798681802676368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574269862210858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318651771899356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138051734124392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16438090748395304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982740013017833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869288454410706
mentalhealth,burnmenow95,2020/01/26,"""Living"" poor in America I've been living with depression for years and for the first time in my life I felt like I needed to write something down. I transcribed my thoughts onto a text file as best as I could and made a throwaway account so I could put this out there. Here it goes.

​

i am dirt

i come from dirt. only dirt comes from dirt.

i can't be helped, nothing can form dirt.

if i wanted to be helped, i wouldn't be worth it, dirt is no use saving.

if i wanted help, i couldn't afford it. the things which are valued in this world mustn't be squandered on

dirt.

​

if i could be helped, it's not viable. dirt is not profitable.

​

if i felt, dirt feels nothing.

best to just let it stay

dirt.",1.5089795918367344,3.6995151360544254,2.119074829931975,97.32473469387756,81.31292517006804,4.464217687074831,19.323809523809523,5.2151,-0.4740590476190478,563,14,123,2,15,173,84,147,0.23399999999999999,0.662,0.10400000000000001,-0.9390000000000001,1,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,3,4,6,0,0,4,0,19,1,0,2,1,30,30,9,0,13,7,0,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,4,0,4,3,7,1,0,1,5,3,16,5,17,13,3,15,0,1,0,0,5,8,0,4,4,82,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3630497172407435,0.4071484211574511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344245050108308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19242289209301075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26752724445230897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619883404148148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05647405514358205,0.0,0.21448072405055493,0.0,0.0,0.09500385266805524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994550580404567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11421106795883648,0.07889027867185339,0.05456631960836016,0.0,0.19724945412561795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10568421876367257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281706474375028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21434002739454866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494563177299816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227976667025766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598477683694801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904717504655968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420218218662587,0.0,0.0,0.0886697534470715,0.06512760846689664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646470116875523,0.0,0.0,0.1317558603863669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4071484211574511,0.07192499769276686
mentalhealth,Wyliee_123,2020/01/26,"Self destructing I’m having a lot of trouble with my anxiety again bc of stuff I’m reliving from my past.I’m extremely irritable and I’m always tired except for when I actually need to sleep and I desperately want to self destruct. I keep thinking about not wanting to go down a similar path I was in when I was younger but my actions are becoming parallel. I’m suppose to be on medication because of my mental disorders but due to being extremely suicidal at times and having bad past memories from my OD it’s hard to take them. I am in therapy but my therapist takes me for a joke. I wanted to start a group but bc I don’t take my meds I couldn’t, she just told me if I changed my mind about pills then I could. She knew what happened and she’s acting like it’s nothing big and that it should be so easy to change. I want to see someone else but the wait list is extremely long. I see her next month but idk if I’ll even be able to talk to her about this stuff. I usually forget everything bc I can’t cope and try to carry on but it’s exhausting. I’m struggling with my assaults and idk who to vent to. I’m worried that it’ll be too much for my friends, I don’t want to make them uncomfortable. So I’m kind of in a pickle. I might just end up venting on here",0.015504828797190841,2.2975694179104487,2.586356453028973,90.55903863037751,89.89552238805972,6.436523266022828,22.43459174714662,7.724431198458867,1.2222577699736608,996,39,221,22,34,343,146,268,0.184,0.745,0.071,-0.9813,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,0,13,11,3,1,6,0,20,5,1,1,0,40,47,21,2,11,13,0,1,1,1,3,4,0,0,2,12,9,0,2,2,1,0,3,5,7,0,0,4,3,36,4,39,33,2,26,0,0,2,0,14,10,0,4,14,142,48,0,0.11664532102428027,0.0,0.1138290070298511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705825135404368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923335131129079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739397077695988,0.07110590503367427,0.1288255927138767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467905660521456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313179732173094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368564357051246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744219811510957,0.0,0.10331313226196256,0.0,0.0,0.07704313442831401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483329320290466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901198856721295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629222403057634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10314907215468257,0.0,0.10449129616176127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367972085513938,0.0,0.12146815198117905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569870118697146,0.0,0.0,0.1032274384922986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916768065868947,0.0,0.0,0.07786165754946904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295666558526819,0.11750788922179793,0.1175510483201737,0.12374225229953024,0.11777852239131326,0.0,0.09310518238030464,0.0,0.08574773233550027,0.08649102753200785,0.0,0.0,0.12405362222163725,0.0,0.0,0.11192433146450184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22270231522172648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18590243747145613,0.0,0.2433730184551457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672956088011345,0.0,0.09883320197549868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256215859115805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219430159490276,0.2670619708485029,0.12759104889886527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26310829416283266,0.09375509059308633,0.0,0.0,0.13339409033179306,0.1354342081465219,0.0,0.07474161178072795,0.0,0.0,0.06801682472608124,0.13406663729750173,0.0,0.11145960296411496,0.0,0.07919451617552059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284683415814184,0.0,0.3440021625808892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845898559878075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,newleafprogramme,2020/01/26,bereavement therapy  https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rFmZvMxZqp4&feature=youtu.be dealing with #loss # #bereavement #HMStherapy,50.0425,63.53017825000001,22.845,-61.6,16.5,26.6,79.0,12.161744961471696,20.79755,118,6,2,5,2,25,7,8,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.575497030371527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5475887375204417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6074123332418616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,M3H1gh420,2020/01/26,"My insecurity and anxiety are making me think of killing myself Hello! First of all english is not my first language and I apologise in advance for my spelling errors.Ok, now to the point.
I'm 22 in the 4th year of university and I used to be confident and had a lot of fun partying, hanging out with my friends, meeting new persons etc. Untill it all changed in my 2nd year of university and I don't have a clue to what happened. Now whenever I hang out with my friends I'm afraid of talking about anything. I don't feel good around anybody no more. I'm afraid of having fun and I feel like I end up just standing in a place all night and drink to forget about everything. I now feel that university was a wrong choice,my 4th year is going terible. I can't talk with people, I don't know how anymore. I find conversation boring and I manage to make every conversation awkward somehow. I feel like I'm pushing my friends away with my lack of any kind of personality. My insecurity goes way past all this to the point where I don't know if I should eat or get out of bed, I fell like I need someone to tell what to do constantly. I feel like an empty shell, nobody upstairs controling me. I don't know why I do anything, and can't find motivation or purpose for any action I take. I want to get rid of this feelings so bad but I don't know how and it's just getting worse and worse. I contemplated suicide many times in the last few months and I start thinking about it more seriously than before. The only thing keeping me from actualy doing it are my parents, wich I know they love me and they support me in everything I do and I know they would be very sad if I would end my life. I know I need to make a change in my life but I don't know how. I'm rambling away, I don't even know if I was coherent in my thought. That reminds me, I feel like I'm getting dumber somehow and I don't know if it's my low self esteem or I really am dumb. I really want to die, to dissapear into nothingness, to stop feeling anything...
I can't talk to my parents despite they wanting me to talk with them about anything, I don't feel good home, I have this guilt feeling all the time and I don't know why and the worst part is that I wasn't always like this!! This is what destroys my souls and my mind, I don't know what happened or how to revert to my old self. Now I feel worthless.
I never told anybody about how I feel, I'm to afroid to do it.Maybe talking about my problems will help me somehow. Hopefully writing this under the protection of anonimity will take this ""stone"" of my heart....",2.4003592314118616,4.0664719849624085,4.0590125313283245,87.01815121136175,76.33082706766919,6.9093400167084384,26.85981620718463,7.715138304826218,1.4576529991645786,2024,80,431,29,45,678,221,532,0.16699999999999998,0.737,0.096,-0.9921,3,0,1,0,0,4,53.0,0,0,5,5,25,35,3,6,14,0,41,6,1,11,6,107,99,35,3,15,13,2,12,6,3,5,2,0,2,4,20,28,2,4,30,1,0,7,20,18,0,2,6,12,81,17,65,86,13,55,1,3,0,1,28,22,1,13,30,285,101,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05219834373274825,0.0,0.0,0.08532030351500136,0.0,0.04799007893910282,0.0,0.06221363826786739,0.0,0.0,0.2064935280866104,0.05584509489950812,0.0,0.0,0.1178782228066034,0.0,0.052378895077849416,0.0,0.0,0.05338061261438985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13272502458136148,0.0,0.0,0.06779138836402131,0.07035966900957623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0651062790668947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06145382425224726,0.0,0.06419085907078567,0.0,0.0,0.11112449100788643,0.0,0.0699631570184873,0.04143412803171133,0.0,0.05285471368763397,0.0,0.11275958915188547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806323556369919,0.17926402431251828,0.0,0.0,0.11467246973315375,0.1067202161644344,0.0,0.0,0.14540058275860765,0.0,0.13110026267982916,0.0,0.03565224232336442,0.10523384407606486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109480265496222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743381412790829,0.0420481744004532,0.0,0.06292566572928952,0.06230738200986818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055759398421167616,0.06940405489102774,0.06532609295181921,0.4137127325658159,0.051135241110053666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861943338813234,0.18388715595298868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053332803857340697,0.05661839852508345,0.0,0.12562299982749664,0.06360076050516879,0.0630230811779206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633417943384452,0.0,0.05007236628918394,0.0,0.0,0.0930304909048054,0.048383058565508105,0.060587298195062984,0.0,0.058870064420518724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582705257902996,0.0,0.0,0.04771078188120169,0.0,0.0,0.13931371000817222,0.06793302592531257,0.05988513000104768,0.04349071537416802,0.10955094324979804,0.06554195780386665,0.0,0.11860470242997555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06002639038228475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037590437608769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088705283035074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05315291978738376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04440228289028817,0.0,0.0,0.052447056732660126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861901316716218,0.0711879316625705,0.0,0.0,0.0943338458163035,0.2521094485630758,0.054830842248030066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041676588372147945,0.08039271856730237,0.0,0.04980248163293922,0.07315947994387935,0.0,0.0,0.05994345237700523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05418061200600498,0.0,0.05176076173574251,0.11100350280393488,0.04979402248338051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321238379403675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785925576255236,0.08912652849863112,0.06858798097341882,0.0,0.12119273722853198
mentalhealth,molesterwithwhitevan,2020/01/26,"I need help I may sound like a typical 16 year old but I do think of suicide from time to time, I think of it but I know for sure that I will never actually do it because I don’t have the balls but thinking of how my problems would vanish helps me with my mind. My mind is always very disturbed and very distracted, I can never pay attention to anything because my mind is always racing this is causing me to fail academically because if I can’t focus on things that I love then I am screwed trying to pay attention in a classroom. Me not doing things correctly because I didn’t pay attention and people finishing a given task faster than I could make me think I’m stupid which then completely demolishes my self esteem. If you have any tips on how to deal with this I would appreciate you so much, I haven’t been at ease with my mind since I was a child and it’s ruining me.",5.020106653123413,5.243420670391068,6.116140172676487,80.1963941086846,68.55307262569832,9.414118842051804,30.23920771965465,9.339509955726095,2.450213407821229,696,25,143,13,11,233,103,179,0.171,0.6920000000000001,0.138,-0.909,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,2,0,1,3,10,2,2,5,0,21,2,0,4,4,38,31,13,1,7,6,0,0,1,0,4,0,1,0,2,10,6,0,0,8,1,3,0,7,7,0,0,4,1,29,3,18,22,1,14,0,2,0,2,8,4,1,3,11,100,39,6,0.0,0.0,0.12628953943689053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21536587521733674,0.0,0.0,0.08800605788564947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649681633286164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315558651779895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294397792597198,0.0,0.0,0.13568827111574272,0.0,0.0,0.1033266660018111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13342030319106746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17348714984922822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112263082025526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322521535326693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680132049964348,0.0,0.08638494816296384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5226855873197861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513428876321683,0.09595895033658873,0.1996243368755581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579837766735608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971947489695413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12383186109320675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13500717969017326,0.0,0.0,0.10705271987990027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14155807225377806,0.0,0.12197130216785257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719540178668376,0.3316934400063299,0.0,0.0,0.15092485988854967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786371097053533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21356044954622747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18386419417315852,0.0,0.0,0.08333846777732262
mentalhealth,Gallifrey34,2020/01/26,"I don't want to be in reality I have been using Internet as a coping mechanism since young age. Back then it felt literally relieving when I could chat with someone, browse some website after a day full of anxiety attacks and nausea. Now, it's like a different reality. I can find people who understand me at least in some ways. To clarify, I have some mental disorders. It started becoming hard to manage the real life. I still live with my fricking parents, I'm not able to have therapies, I have no friends and I feel like everyone in the real life are there to hurt me and abuse me. Just let me live. It's hard to pretend to be normal. When I mess something up, I'm the bad one. Well, sorry, I didn't choose to go through trauma as a child! 



I WANT TO BE FREE!",2.721388611388612,4.4573554545454535,4.737792207792207,82.19427072927074,75.62337662337663,8.374825174825176,27.43056943056943,9.057496981413335,2.338014585414585,596,24,120,14,13,205,99,154,0.188,0.696,0.11599999999999999,-0.8290000000000001,2,0,1,0,1,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,8,11,1,0,7,0,14,2,0,1,0,22,24,8,0,4,2,1,4,2,1,0,2,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,5,2,1,1,4,5,1,1,3,4,16,7,21,16,5,19,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,3,13,83,21,1,0.14782542132099855,0.17514895167360509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308604269459276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817275752335836,0.0,0.11366862427714698,0.12342805213106015,0.0,0.16326156379553491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802657026080797,0.0,0.0,0.09533516746006283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15444610224335314,0.16942073982775752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125352499147256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474497467683093,0.10560651052863716,0.14193558658987995,0.0,0.13510975700408234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420955381579108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401259357489466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26484508326355144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15825017092221413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116150877943807,0.2088269335922103,0.14444006781398086,0.0,0.261065110627416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14897325578140955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14483752658577967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001703312390824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641426364178097,0.0,0.0,0.10248353418760793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33651538513330964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228271610248395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252519997736582,0.11380323142955708,0.0,0.16547845652335866,0.10463159406427074,0.0,0.11805357242083067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690512523937761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15389147693864672,0.0,0.1276737012728238,0.0,0.0,0.17438252703944962,0.11733693873762055,0.0,0.0,0.13291280688698334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,April_Paradise,2020/01/26,"im really really scared of dying since im atheist i dont believe that theres an afterlife or reincarnation so once i die my consciousness will cease to exist so i will cease to exist and i wont feel any emotion again, any thoughts again or anything again. itll just be nothing, probably less than nothing. i really dont want this to happen but death is inevitable and i have a pain in my chest just from thinking about it for too long",2.6020505617977534,4.596609022471913,4.128525280898876,85.27795646067419,76.75280898876404,7.596067415730338,25.73174157303371,8.472884824447931,1.829594382022472,349,13,70,7,8,116,61,89,0.17,0.816,0.013999999999999999,-0.9376,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,1,2,0,9,2,1,0,0,12,14,7,3,1,5,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,8,0,9,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,4,46,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291325794274216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13863755980789133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18980951097675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3496933096797104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3948943163167973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18950758416902805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518417253140012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489786513782574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639559184550205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909183621887315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3233055927636396,0.0,0.0,0.17941648095971344,0.0,0.0,0.17926538604026765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816406010113627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237811669926839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866920344238245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936123506790196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794963340273384,0.0,0.1337474271459402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099368762475443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OmG_SaLaMi,2020/01/26,Is my friend ashamed of me? Help We ve been friends for 5 years now but  everytime i make plans so we can go out he ignores me or cancels. The weird thing is that up close we pretty chill and have a lot of fun. I am very confused about this and don't know what to do.(sorry for bad English not my mother tongue),0.5542857142857152,2.6206048181818207,1.6750216450216475,99.8468181818182,84.15151515151516,4.983549783549783,21.549783549783545,6.1826913282559595,-0.01369437229437187,242,8,58,2,7,76,57,66,0.21,0.61,0.18,-0.359,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,3,0,0,1,3,8,0,2,2,0,7,0,0,1,0,15,10,5,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,1,0,9,3,8,9,1,6,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,3,2,38,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759924475211081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5107586767138451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18785714368003398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22155829269264454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18165966378535348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28101873947271144,0.0,0.0,0.2206422970918848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3362845351129436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3700196465824657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219600348805814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27273540794956064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21286105227287774
mentalhealth,poopbag69,2020/01/26,Garbage I’ve been in a dark place for over a year. I haven’t been able to tell anyone. My friends and parents have no clue how I feel. I’ve literally let everyone down in my life. I’m usually able to put on a happy face but I’m tired of doing that. I’m at the point where nothing makes me happy.,-0.8913636363636357,1.1032488787878805,1.7517424242424262,97.19761363636366,90.51515151515152,5.118181818181818,18.85606060606061,6.6274283507984215,-0.06453939393939345,230,7,57,3,8,79,48,66,0.084,0.77,0.146,0.6124,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,6,3,1,2,0,5,11,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,5,3,10,8,0,12,0,0,0,0,3,9,0,0,2,31,6,0,0.4299381297438253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503113684381587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054121537820021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10869481829693052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16608456626621812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4576771337793394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21982043343127824,0.15183900790956062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14349352006414726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20626861549234105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386977066666044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22459691895800624,0.0,0.20321525044627325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161032850503981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878924378431296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470753168433287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367580543556858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843302973986804
mentalhealth,WaffleBrewer,2020/01/26,"Looking for advice for getting back into ""life"" For the past 8 years, I would consider that I have lived a very closed life, when it comes sharing it someone else. To keep a long story short: I always had problems socializing with people, never really had confidence in myself, maybe due to delayed puberty, bullied by kids in school excessively, parental neglect, having poor nutrition as a teenager, being  ugly etc. Every little detail usually builds up into a systematic fault that keeps you feeling down, or is part of your general social awkwardness and anxiety.

At some point it was starting a bit more positive in life. Met someone I connected with, started to take care of myself more - mind you this was when I was 18-19. And then when I was 19 I got diagnosed with cancer. Hodgkin's lymphoma. Was planning to leave the country for the next summer with my girlfriend before starting our university studies, which I think quite a few young couples do. Instead she left me after my diagnosis, most of my friends stopped calling, visiting and I would always remember how some of the popular kids would generate crows of people to visit them - while I could not get even a single soul to show up at my place. Figured I was the issue, maybe all the times my parents said that ""Why am I not normal, like other kids?"" started to make sense. Yeah, maybe I am inadequate, unattractive and not worthy of human connection.

Throughout the treatment period (which was quite long) I became kind of a hermit, really only leaving home for food and to the hospital for treatments. I gained quite a lot of weight, because on the days I would feel better I would eat like a whale. That and getting hormone treatment to balance out my white blood cell count also messed with my body weight. Needless to say that additional weight that already did not help with my flabby body as it was, so the only thing I had for myself is that I was quite tall. 196cm or 6'5\~ish in height, so I did not look like a balloon, unless I turned to my side. 

My confidence shattered ever so more. Already existing social anxiety at times would manifest into a panic and I had no self-esteem whatsoever. I sleepwalked through my university years and was later diagnosed with severe depression, to which I had to get treatment.

One of the minor breakthroughs in my life was that I realized that all the treatments and all this covering and being unable to do anything in my life will always escalate and if I don't do it using my own will - then I'll never change and I'll resent myself more and more. So I threw away my anti-depressants, called up the psych center and said I won't be coming in any more, because I think it's a waste of time and I'd rather do something more productive in life. 

Managed to get an entry position IT job in a financial company. It did not pay a lot, but the salary was pretty good for a 23 year old that had basically no job experience. Hours were terrible at times, because of the shifting schedule and the tracked hours. Working at an IT help desk for a large financial company and dealing with many many problems at the same time will either break you or you'll thrive in this environment. 

In my case - I thrived. Lot of people looked up to me for guidance, even though I still sometimes feel like I'm full of shit, when I try to give others advise or counsel on how to deal with problems. Worked there for almost two years until I got into a long-lasting argument with management, because I had a tendency to shake the status quo and try to make something happen, I would often stand up for my colleagues that made mistakes, but those mistakes were largely because of poor management. Anyways, it was a relatively toxic work environment, but I was glad that I could get that experience. 

I still don't know if I really want to work in IT in general. It feels like a default option for me, due to the fact that I spent so much time with computers as a teenager, and in the later years, because I struggled connecting with people and was always ostracized. I only ever found comfort in technology and food. 

Flash-forward to a few more recent years (I'm now 27). I'm still dealing with insecurity, confidence issues. I'd say that I'm too agreeable as well, when it comes to negotiating with other people. I'm unsatisfied the way I look, but in the least 1.5 years I managed to go from 277 (126 kilos roughly) to 209 (95 kilos). I'm still flabby, and have some excess skin hanging. I'm in the healthy BMI range, but still can definitely lose for my height and body frame somewhere between 10 kilos or so. Nutritionally I have more knowledge now as an adult, and I'm eating relatively clean and slowly building up lean mass and going through a full body re-composition.  I'd say at the moment I am past the severe depression threshold which kept me in a pit of despair for the longest time, however at times I feel like I'm at edge of an abyss and I can fall at any time. 

I still have trouble making new friends, or making a move towards the opposite sex, even if I occasionally get complimented by women. How does one become educated more in terms of dating people, meeting new people? I'm so envious of people, colleagues that let's say plan trips to far-away countries with friends and have hobbies built around circles of friends, while I don't really have anything like that, or have experienced such things in the past. 

I just feel like no one would want such a broken person in their lives, and how could I possibly be a positive influence in someone's life?",7.448581280788176,7.316223790476194,7.630725779967161,72.59828571428574,63.47619047619048,10.365188834154353,35.627257799671604,9.921728534948242,3.522306075533661,4420,184,775,82,58,1438,452,1050,0.138,0.7909999999999999,0.071,-0.9953,6,0,2,0,0,0,123.0,1,5,2,13,43,44,3,5,60,1,70,25,7,11,8,152,133,73,0,23,25,2,11,8,5,13,10,7,2,7,43,55,7,6,14,1,4,13,15,22,1,4,37,24,88,22,139,75,34,150,1,5,5,1,47,63,1,20,79,536,131,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03997521483383136,0.0,0.0,0.04096385319902136,0.0,0.0902868728741714,0.032714432544598285,0.1361562629667723,0.0,0.0,0.055638229352980094,0.0,0.06258962775986743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732825483660426,0.03641714891123735,0.0,0.0,0.07686957647873746,0.031456034325547416,0.0,0.14962428494007593,0.045180113575346535,0.03481003518839812,0.0,0.0,0.03618015524204751,0.04466137740486294,0.18176004018094305,0.0,0.0,0.08354410006926076,0.0,0.04170884000355469,0.0,0.04327566273389618,0.10571689246531002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979860854935244,0.04526436629449977,0.0,0.026382533607019885,0.12652429175274782,0.10570303442623387,0.08304232937490492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035799216346566395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371901158830844,0.034173718786219484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04562367943016914,0.08105883676552203,0.07400797934818534,0.03446709120088423,0.0,0.0,0.08003252943237152,0.0,0.0,0.1241070966090298,0.11689987597951333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893319885212676,0.04485394888759329,0.12642291284798332,0.0,0.14961065326477788,0.03924306470714102,0.046498372687729696,0.034312024870905365,0.06543636875567681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0361751628458697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054840076155031114,0.0,0.041034460471880495,0.0,0.08057306687744299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539548212184489,0.08119054907447942,0.07272253074898291,0.0,0.042599803243179496,0.022482186685980145,0.03334580581280831,0.0,0.08663217737461561,0.0444470960849535,0.04183161042992863,0.202263688113767,0.1598862222547176,0.04100096362727226,0.07224573300963108,0.10860793954659086,0.13741101117115792,0.04576603541885048,0.0,0.10433657584904722,0.0,0.038708517019617424,0.10922669811619888,0.08294939315091307,0.12329395820159395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041305822129571616,0.0,0.0,0.04347915493641647,0.030072380837794607,0.0,0.06310215970558751,0.07901917489690162,0.04350654728874364,0.0,0.04008154613362076,0.0,0.0,0.042926484062246605,0.0,0.08316177127758716,0.09333804436535698,0.0,0.04799719296453124,0.09084787360239996,0.04429981049481296,0.11715508948859367,0.22688586861744464,0.035719636799556635,0.042740570887604835,0.0,0.03867166057948142,0.04611807418059513,0.0,0.04161854943731769,0.0,0.1174314414411524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17404447483012395,0.0,0.0,0.10482787373918992,0.0,0.0403921095817292,0.0,0.04634124236359806,0.0,0.07782651228850174,0.1301280058728467,0.0,0.041401484598319,0.0,0.0,0.04267638278754055,0.0924296953341324,0.04199188453076432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510288565608865,0.10398466320707736,0.06298656954760172,0.04045945343263696,0.0,0.11582070374662415,0.0,0.19601700556886625,0.03420125399422,0.0,0.04276634164248566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03075802554050532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05435544617094823,0.052424901573055314,0.04019229510553665,0.0,0.21468615212860556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0555482363399866,0.044496591845579324,0.03996156238691974,0.0,0.0,0.03533172285005888,0.045054822890480566,0.0337537141136851,0.048257668210659084,0.03247118363626848,0.0,0.14944623052779324,0.03678156432638705,0.0,0.03691346792983875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912720910014996,0.0,0.0,0.23248122801953566,0.0,0.0,0.18440567768083704
mentalhealth,RaddlePaddle,2020/01/26,"What's wrong with me? I keep ruminating over my mental health, existential questions, and I'm afraid I'm going to go insane. Reality feels far away, I try to ground myself but my existential worries makes it difficult. It's like reality has been watered down to shapes and I can't engage myself. I get panic attacks on and off. I'm so afraid of going insane that I have a panic attack whenever I look at any media portraying mental illness. I was fine until I had a mental breakdown at the end of my first semester in college. I was stressed and depressed and finally caved in, but I've never been hit this hard before. Every moment I'm awake I ruminate over these fears. Does anyone know what this could be?",3.603695652173915,5.6996920507246385,5.397898550724636,76.8451086956522,74.14492753623188,7.7884057971014515,25.99275362318841,8.59863814320734,2.1240318840579704,565,20,99,11,12,193,92,138,0.32299999999999995,0.642,0.035,-0.9929,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,1,14,2,6,3,0,10,3,0,1,1,15,24,9,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,6,1,1,3,0,0,3,2,11,0,1,5,3,16,3,17,16,0,22,0,1,1,0,1,13,0,1,7,64,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381291483018884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674226981083228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3473418297320421,0.1434275477278903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12990101447416005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188527284418345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148441563522886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133592353343809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520998924390218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12862124639450245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17178308852819504,0.07718865008180532,0.0,0.0,0.16722976368873133,0.0,0.12985111696643026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975768863388738,0.0,0.2602777798489616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675189901598628,0.0,0.0,0.16226869047535505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568975825927473,0.0,0.0,0.08389703837701484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458116014146939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281945684229209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190063595286177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4615311421982294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773953282296998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35822337002880456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17101229272072954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17486962743487888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364500084187812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15503196755318713,0.0,0.0,0.16690794415461072,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,toonedit,2020/01/26,"Mental Health Hi Everyone, 

I’m concerned about my sisters mental health and I’m not really sure what to do. Recently I went on a trip with her after not seeing her for about 4 years and noticed that she has changed since the last time I saw her. I noticed she traveled with at least 2 cartons of cigarettes for a week worth of travel and seriously chain smoked the entire time I was with her. There was a bunch of other signs that really got me concerned like 1) she sat outside on the balcony 10+ hrs a day, chain smoked, & watch YouTube while talking to herself in sentences I couldn’t even put together. 2) we would go out as a family and she wouldn’t spend time with us, rather she would walk off, chain smoke and continue talking to herself while watching YouTube. 3) she would think out loud to the point where it was super offensive to people because she would literally say what she thought out loud 4) there were many times when she got mood swings. One minute she would be super nice, almost manipulative. Other times she would just snap.. 

As I’m typing this I can’t even write this out to make sense because I’m so confused. Has anyone seen symptoms like this or know how I can get her treatment? She thinks everything is absolutely normal...",6.060550964187327,6.613584834710746,5.817702479338845,82.0877658402204,66.35537190082644,8.767382920110192,30.596143250688705,8.648137234880735,2.20984870523416,998,35,193,14,15,310,145,242,0.042,0.88,0.079,0.8329,0,0,4,0,0,0,27.0,2,0,0,2,12,10,1,1,9,0,19,3,0,3,1,40,37,13,0,10,5,1,0,2,0,7,3,3,0,0,10,14,0,0,4,2,2,7,5,3,0,1,11,8,30,6,29,17,2,33,0,0,5,0,27,11,0,3,17,120,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115177330317935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462565293776462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042564635563168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402319715579528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167740366642532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074179295905502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15194111699682825,0.0,0.0,0.10990788926265928,0.1033738293872652,0.0,0.1084319515394932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060093940962464475,0.0,0.06536931968144337,0.0,0.183986262775662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244524766765602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321276051888786,0.09375780330428718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238730487857478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767776863381553,0.11661365946457415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318290619722153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269656338861885,0.0,0.2619052821307736,0.0,0.0,0.07794148623118331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974136523260257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087324134979667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562828919959027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14737132492792338,0.0,0.1135697690578628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146964424472838,0.0,0.0,0.09165717429412287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514690143796672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840632053669158,0.1195512890268455,0.0,0.1848997096828541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14740215418771382,0.0,0.09131415391113604,0.3353495545107338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835659763450567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226323952962392,0.0,0.0,0.10662600220781664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4902474700481469,0.0,0.0,0.07407001885142077
mentalhealth,Saberleaf,2020/01/26,"When/why to go to a psychiatrist? Hello,

Recently I asked my GP to give me an official recommendation to a psychiatrist. She wasn't too happy about it and kept insisting to give me medication instead.

I refused it because I want to know what's wrong with me rather than be on medication for a symptom which might have a deeper cause. I will also add that I've been visiting therapists for years but with no help.

The issues I face I would describe as depression, anxiety and social anxiety mixed but it doesn't exactly feel that way? I don't feel depressed and it weirds me out when I describe my symptoms and people immediately call it depression. I feel the happiest I've ever been.

I might be overstressed but it feels odd that just having a ""normal"" job would stress me to the degree that it looks like depression. I mean, there nothing extra stressful but my job in my life. The symptoms basically is that doing ANYTHING is very difficult, I feel exhausted and just resting after work is ideal, even doing basic hygiene requires me to cut it down to the small steps and having a reminder on phone. I have almost no hobbies and no motivation for anything.

As for anxiety, that could be it but it doesn't define my issue altogether either. It feels like a part of something bigger. I have common anxiety attacks and just anxiety is almost omnipresent in my life.

Social anxiety is odd one in my case, because I don't have issues with large groups with one common conversation or even speaking in front of large groups but I'm practically mute in a group (even smaller one) with multiple on-going conversations. I also love meeting new people and people in general but following all social cues and ready body language is exhausting and since I work with clients at work, I don't have any more energy for more strangers but friends actually energise me because I have to watch for that less. It's like, I love people but it's hard work to know what to say, to read between the lines, to read body language etc.

I also realised I have huge memory issues, where people tell me stories about me that I don't remember even if it happened about 5 years ago.

My attention span is very short, I have to do multiple things at once because I can't pay attention to just one. I'm not sure if it's related to any of the above but I tend to jump in conversations, mix up information, sentences, etc.

I'm just tired of it all and I want to know what's wrong with me but I'm not sure if this is something I should go to a psychiatrist with.

Thank you for your input.",5.992160570568607,6.645302811359028,6.816314859647977,74.51837793626906,66.52535496957404,10.09354184387882,32.738925603611854,10.088038600937136,3.2990294968265403,2038,83,373,46,31,677,218,493,0.157,0.71,0.133,-0.7714,2,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,2,0,7,22,25,2,2,17,0,41,15,3,2,6,84,70,33,0,12,24,0,7,3,1,6,10,2,0,0,30,22,0,3,15,2,1,7,13,14,0,4,4,11,49,11,61,56,11,38,0,4,2,2,29,20,0,8,13,264,79,11,0.0,0.0,0.06447314882643124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058565578415660034,0.0,0.1323157557607273,0.0,0.0,0.1585044323854745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985744493152463,0.0,0.30325249896269424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10873719422186784,0.0,0.0617649596515544,0.0751622507387822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16109853603385735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14677401663606315,0.0,0.0,0.06746314052969847,0.0,0.0,0.06787036291855546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052750176654201474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276181852059992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473672800031467,0.17455000624748693,0.059762576973675575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20043676315446915,0.04719922025955228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05104421933186544,0.0,0.0,0.12675750349619302,0.1126444446143051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058423996254251084,0.07033095405856488,0.05918423663958715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04428420153235325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758326395861004,0.1311252240997047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892826077871104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333201509458897,0.09683293019905344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05548074818737959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925847466504345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196776792885215,0.0,0.13311376120657847,0.0,0.14017609143393844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638091941404722,0.0,0.0,0.06473292493948284,0.06339433390574385,0.0,0.0,0.07036060344597156,0.17907841113048367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715455511130751,0.0,0.2290172679167626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217239595248456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523449442256443,0.0,0.07484252612223741,0.0,0.0,0.052540179017856084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054652396167302116,0.0,0.0,0.2020449929723491,0.0,0.10172523946875238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15136207227326992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453721744945175,0.2060108414922994,0.0,0.0,0.05774662284206712,0.060826831531337736,0.0,0.07671041051716003,0.043892855396671815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593581359164661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902656473709044,0.07793761257664507,0.05244195635605965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05961638158349164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19239409226436124,0.0,0.0,0.09386607637999772,0.1444706703885509,0.0,0.08509166253882983
mentalhealth,MammaMegS,2020/01/26,"Troubling thoughts Hi all.
For a few years now I have always had this niggling in the back of my mind where it's like I have a conversation with myself as well as seeing flashes of images of bad things happening: like falling down the stairs or cutting myself whilst chopping veggies.

I thought that this was just a normal thing as I had spoken to a few friends and they said that they had experienced similar things with inner monologues or fears of falling down stairs. But I've noticed over the last couple of months it's gotten worse. Sometimes it feels like there's someone screaming in my head and sometimes it feels like there's someone telling me to do things. The sounds in my head are pretty easy to ignore but the visions are getting to the point where I close my eyes for a second and my brain shows me images of being raped and stabbed or my son being hit by a car, or of me shooting my dog. None of these things have ever happened to me or anyone I know but it feels so real and it's really starting to get to me. 

I just wanted to know if anyone else has these things going on in their heads too or if it's time I speak to my doctor. 
I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety 6 years ago but have been coping reasonably well and haven't really felt any set backs from them but these visions are concerning. 

Any advice would be welcome and thank you in advance.",5.190665849673202,6.041640525735296,5.226862745098039,84.50310457516342,68.375,7.662091503267972,28.7140522875817,7.594959193182576,1.6377174836601305,1101,37,213,11,18,344,147,272,0.121,0.7759999999999999,0.10300000000000001,-0.7391,0,0,0,1,0,1,12.0,0,1,4,1,14,17,2,1,12,0,20,8,5,1,2,44,40,25,0,5,15,1,4,4,1,1,2,4,0,0,20,12,0,1,9,1,0,5,2,8,2,1,11,11,29,9,36,24,4,34,0,1,2,1,13,16,0,8,16,157,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278259967337648,0.09323746638675516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751982151758866,0.0,0.0,0.1430546872079127,0.0,0.08046391596004256,0.0,0.0,0.14709135221401876,0.10777135381685704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16175687844751752,0.0878225480098107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741785962475705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638184459184668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059307303999832,0.10675748124888153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765819896288624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786603579130525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514310986944848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183589538797146,0.1595494868559833,0.15028403480274793,0.10099118192641048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126332588086205,0.0,0.10990647183551487,0.0,0.0597773350974175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18602413001965926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238411258014389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561051534220056,0.08573734059693949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20554638222215768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062038014747687,0.0,0.08395524162662875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305599426210936,0.0,0.11975036523256985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943095552001008,0.0,0.0,0.10700787284280533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972010437112365,0.13476452129067584,0.1081445788992574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005213592691424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381640880710486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17824067662943865,0.0,0.208055307392667,0.0,0.07444833677918881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193367421342116,0.09683742248841933,0.0,0.0,0.4192693462996616,0.0,0.0,0.1670054638501206,0.06133245012322936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062039048614056076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18914243824501534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718940912190066,0.07471825070369705,0.0,0.0,0.13546747492953698
mentalhealth,figure_skating_bagel,2020/01/26,"I've been feeling terrible af 1. I've been feeling depressed all week. I don't know what tf is going on in my life but I've just been feeling horrible lately, and it really hit a point last night. Every single person in my life has been asking ""what's wrong?"" or ""are you ok"" and I never actually want to tell them what's going on. No, I'm not sad because I don't have friends (although that's sorta true). No, I'm not feeling upset because something hurts. I'm just feeling horrible about myself and I can't figure out one definite reason.
2. Before I continue on my probably boring and useless rant about my problems can I just say that school dances are pretty stupid? Like, no. I'm embarrassed af about dancing in public, I hate feeling like an outcast all the time, and the moment I try to just sit down and be the blob of sadness I am, someone always says ""come on, let's go dance!"" and proceed to dRaG me onto the dance floor. Ik this sounds stupid but honestly school-sanctioned social events are usually disasters for me.
3. Feeling bad about my body. That's nothing new, I've had self-esteem issues since I was seven, but I never thought that I could hate myself so much. My stomach is big, my face is too round, my legs look like tReE tRuNks and I just don't feel confident. I'm not happy with how I look and every single day I don't want to wake up because I know I'm gonna have to go outside in this body yet again. It's such a pain to try and make yourself look pretty when you think that every goddamn thing in your closet makes you look like a walking balloon.
4. I'm so sick of pretending like everything's fine when it's not. Yeah, sure, I smile so much. I usually act so happy. But I haven't been happy for the past 4 years of my life. I just try so hard to make other people happy that I've just neglected myself but pretended that everything's alright. In some sort of messed-up way, I don't feel like I'm deserving of my own happiness.
5. My eating disorder has been making me think some messed-up stuff recently. I don't know why the heck I wanted to give myself (and actually gave myself) an eating disorder in fifth grade. Like, great work, fifth-grade me. You've officially ruined years of my life. I just wish that I could actually go through with my ideas instead of leaving them in the dust. I want to starve myself so badly that I actually overthink it and just beat myself up about it. Eating disorders are a great way to ruin your life
6. I overthink things like way too much. Every single interaction I have is overthought. The minute I finish doing something, in my head, I tell myself ""did you seriously just do that? (person) is never gonna see you the same way again. You are so hopeless""
7. For some reason, my family is so obsessed with the idea that I have a crush on this one guy. Like, no. I don't want to date anyone, or dress up for anyone. I just want to live my life peacefully and not worry about my family trying to set me up with someone
8. I'm so sick of trying to be perfect. I get perfect grades, test scores, everything. Now I've worn myself down to the point that I can't even try to follow a religion without making some sort of big mistake. I get so tired that I can't even believe that I call myself a follower of my religion. I'm so far from not being a sinner that I've probably just started my own religion where every goddamn thing is a sin
9. I'm just wondering what I did to end up in this mess that I call a life.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk, sorry that I probably wasted your time",3.1131393054459373,4.479884189226521,4.65849644830308,84.69067679558013,73.82044198895028,7.491870560378849,24.94514601420679,8.07648339933343,1.4203726124704024,2779,87,564,42,56,933,291,724,0.248,0.62,0.132,-0.9986,1,0,2,0,0,3,94.0,0,9,2,4,44,53,4,3,23,3,49,21,7,8,9,103,115,35,0,11,27,0,11,9,1,2,11,3,1,3,35,20,3,1,21,6,0,15,25,27,0,3,13,19,88,26,70,93,15,83,1,9,6,0,28,31,1,10,40,355,123,5,0.0,0.0,0.20006419692660332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04264704054555029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167531597982525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04791512930506376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558910886341868,0.09373102356658572,0.0,0.04361297672906715,0.057745173953265325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386222909260102,0.0,0.0,0.1046711637162007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830075093777444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184354201832335,0.0,0.0,0.033054285008027866,0.0,0.04414458795835597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17622294803909322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733546164576948,0.0,0.0,0.04539541233224735,0.0,0.0,0.06770494279224824,0.0,0.21591653647104134,0.0,0.1381900964640109,0.0,0.09663452817694464,0.0,0.2332379105778255,0.07323106028379693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03959834804977188,0.0,0.05355570520268498,0.04916705365527031,0.1456428035043569,0.0,0.0,0.11301438957152417,0.0,0.05074905009208869,0.0,0.2728016643154908,0.045913093239363004,0.10120449431046552,0.052600905649680285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486796102207783,0.11571798743500272,0.0,0.05349536641360226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845027946206437,0.041778465464197806,0.057816211237500026,0.0542700849823731,0.0,0.05241020419387386,0.2534131745371256,0.22535896069475175,0.0,0.045257803611379134,0.0,0.17216021759503075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17106063730446633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130317196091351,0.0,0.11858963979348013,0.049500976044363015,0.0,0.04809796335905378,0.0,0.04917914175672356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06946143309628595,0.0,0.054537366686343285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048927291262461016,0.03553274240679586,0.0895052061900247,0.0,0.0,0.09690229979942283,0.0,0.0,0.10428652647339046,0.1657799134785442,0.04904270368314896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032834322008015664,0.10539432464841626,0.0506066749341586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151772414501746,0.0,0.10374261183953776,0.04084242543914073,0.0,0.05346860694970237,0.0,0.0,0.04239744741939533,0.0,0.0,0.05224651657037697,0.08685389470948983,0.07891493866799898,0.0,0.05737412762088034,0.036277510421256695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058673026456066285,0.0,0.0,0.048305842916819185,0.0,0.0,0.041195643792201,0.08959568389643596,0.04718736180649362,0.0,0.0,0.10215169833015833,0.06568238153035065,0.0,0.04068957559924398,0.0597726878736297,0.05890838992942495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087866839885296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11289703854764732,0.0,0.18138394999715335,0.16273065725206032,0.041112488032525665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046248336409317733,0.0,0.05893902695281976,0.04940657132789784,0.05558226402447323,0.037313178298762316,0.05205044487549885,0.0,0.0,0.056037686185734056,0.0,0.0660111823327043
mentalhealth,LunaaMoonnn,2020/01/26,"My eyes tear up when I’m embarrassed or nervous I’m not sure if this is the right place to post this topic on, but I don’t know where else to put it. Anyways, whenever I (15F) get embarrassed or nervous, my eyes tear up and I can feel my face turn bright red.

For example, I could be in class and have a teacher call on me to answer a question. If I answer incorrectly I’ll get bright red and have tears in my eyes, which causes people to look at me. It isn’t just when I get things wrong though. Even if I get something right and get praised by a teacher I could still get tears in my eyes and flushed.

I don’t know why this happens. It’s embarrassing whenever it happens, especially in school or public places. It even happens when people are just asking me questions/trying to get to know me. 

It’s not even like I’m upset about anything. It just happens and I have no idea how to stop it, which is frustrating to me.

If anyone has any suggestions on what to do to calm myself I’d greatly appreciate it. It’s been happening for along time now, and I’d like to change it.",2.5582882882882885,4.0483122162162175,3.890270270270271,89.1382882882883,75.48648648648648,7.095495495495496,24.94594594594595,7.793537801064563,1.1586648648648643,840,28,184,12,18,276,109,222,0.174,0.746,0.08,-0.9529,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,16,16,1,6,4,0,16,5,5,2,1,35,38,20,0,6,13,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,18,8,0,1,8,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,1,10,21,8,26,34,0,24,1,0,9,0,6,15,0,8,9,118,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787480481742541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097013188621359,0.0,0.09529362664876724,0.0,0.1082574743100686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824486317116185,0.0,0.0,0.11895861523299225,0.12250116559681988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18491393586946453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673613573133896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294546486037097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05855201681881714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4235054590228548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12767003400755075,0.0,0.0,0.5120082899161222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072423296824678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19092214192995102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314817238913097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972429303845174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16056243629351796,0.0,0.24197294373976716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109044986802217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641109833135314,0.1297226292854796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19778532851421332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171958971932825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914858489830561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247812027219213,0.09681408011998424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10914023658997203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769324499248041,0.0,0.11377302362103693,0.0,0.06752397745527282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862067578650972,0.1259572707109566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449159093025767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12660924556884526,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xyariiah,2020/01/26,"I’ve been having memory loss and I’m scared. To put it in perspective, I think of my thoughts as strings of some sort. And when normal people think, they sort of grab a string of thoughts. But for a while, I seems like each string has been slipping as soon as I get a hold of it and I lose my train of thought immediately. Then I’d been staring into space for a few minutes trying to remember when I was just thinking about literally two seconds ago. 

Now I know that it’s normal for people to forget what they’re doing when they get distracted or they aren’t focusing on what their thinking about.

But it’s not the same. When I’d try and type something into YouTube for example, I’d say out loud, “PewDiePie Happy Wheels” and in the next second and a half when I turn to type it into the computer I’d be staring at the keys trying to think about what the hell just went through my mind. 

To be very honest it scares me sometimes. Do you guys have any idea what it could be?",3.83076094759512,4.780220105527639,4.421913137114141,88.67684673366837,71.56281407035176,7.494759511844939,26.27458722182341,7.7094869923839395,1.2132366116295763,767,24,166,9,14,244,114,199,0.099,0.851,0.05,-0.8258,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,4,2,12,9,1,3,10,0,14,0,0,0,0,39,29,19,0,3,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,12,11,0,1,12,0,0,2,2,6,0,4,8,5,16,3,31,17,4,22,1,2,2,0,7,9,1,5,12,112,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12641665623808818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09698083783719652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386382801965975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14901744123696087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120799196479014,0.0,0.15181279315668764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099123639016502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837565381119865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967286689927797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15954599961291546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399715031425622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516691475099926,0.0,0.2794583487686481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19773797519997213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14336413551153818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155124140727553,0.0,0.0,0.1134105378836643,0.2855583559186728,0.0,0.0,0.12982832414486806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978944438479116,0.14104660547117154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4568990545899845,0.0,0.3396532498939009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29047192352870754,0.15512056398153198,0.13931089636156066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766957766016878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220246304248834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,claudio_zombie,2020/01/26,"Having Trouble Dealing With The Worst Experience I Ever Could Have Imagined. Last night my father died.  After what should have been a routine double bypass, his recovery didn't go well.  At first, things were looking up.  There were a few complications that popped up during the surgery, but they seemed to pass.  Then one after another, a series of cascading problems led him to his final state.  He lay in his hospital bed, brain bleeding, in a coma, heart failing, on so many medications and machines and the doctors telling me there is no way he can survive.  My brave, so supportive wife called all loved ones that could make it down to the hospital in time to say goodbye.  Then it was time.  I had to make a decision to let my fathers life end one way or another.  My sister was a wreck and could not cope with even thinking about it.  It was her worst fear realized.  My other two sisters were half a country away and couldn't be there.  Even though I know they all loved and supported me, I had to ask for their forgiveness and blessing.  I let them know that we would not want him being kept alive artificially when the certain best outcome was complete brain death.  There was literally nothing I could do to help him.  Nothing.  Literally just over 24 hours earlier, I was joking with him as he lay in his hospital bed undergoing a long recovery.  I looked in his eyes and he looked back at me and he said I was a good man.  He said he loved me and appreciated everything I and my wife did for him.  He trusted me with his life.  He trusted me not to fail him, but I did.  My best friend's mom convinced me to be there for him as he passed.  ""He was there when you came into this world, you should be there when he leaves it"", she said.  So I held his hand, crying like I've never cried in my life, watching his heart rate slow more and more over 5 minutes, which felt like an eternity.  It was the worst thing I can imagine.

I was the one who said yes to anything the doctors said we needed for him.  I was the one who decided to end his life.  I feel like I failed him.  Even though there was nothing I could do.  It hurts so much and I don't know what to do.  I wish I could've just brought him home.  I'm sorry dad; I love you.",2.9849696635410936,4.756232662131524,3.8284464055892653,88.84341974627691,74.98639455782312,7.035141263712692,25.297603726175154,7.824948511530503,1.2435348532205674,1728,59,365,25,37,552,214,441,0.11199999999999999,0.6759999999999999,0.212,0.9957,0,0,0,0,0,0,53.0,2,3,4,7,26,32,0,1,19,1,46,19,6,3,5,64,79,28,2,13,8,8,3,3,1,3,9,6,3,1,19,20,0,2,13,1,0,6,8,10,1,8,31,14,67,22,43,33,12,48,1,4,5,4,70,17,0,2,25,261,86,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125820437046228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059352534133075674,0.0,0.06742691683706667,0.0,0.0677635885977086,0.05545949038866892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138097705926468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610301761462368,0.07364744657367947,0.08249151407685383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562144128030708,0.0,0.0,0.34551452420293843,0.0,0.15845132983967336,0.0,0.07435746317939107,0.0,0.0,0.07485411647331884,0.0,0.0,0.14764550127197948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776226367346205,0.0,0.0,0.14291317627610448,0.06524097692778799,0.0,0.0,0.0648210859292576,0.07055185740992526,0.0,0.08116040972235612,0.036468447041145546,0.05152594476170975,0.06925108270070025,0.0790091519196464,0.0,0.061349286161957214,0.0,0.0,0.05572341261646181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040990164660862936,0.06049482887289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17093638172739478,0.04834370799824099,0.0,0.07234701750996601,0.0,0.07102836266372499,0.0,0.07721105000678936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891364978083688,0.05879130782470875,0.0,0.07636970952430036,0.0,0.14750491257551715,0.20377541102660868,0.1057095474271348,0.0,0.0,0.06382814520398034,0.18169990631546712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603816564835378,0.0,0.09628767809172896,0.07312318877498754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265811033780249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447165017084718,0.0,0.0,0.05301999924013108,0.05347959752548083,0.05562706321270172,0.0,0.0,0.06768420376777448,0.0,0.20761696458565984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443680284648514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901365707801854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.343035827846099,0.05735650603881552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06565967498948808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073776670959565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636926516009194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630402214776728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583297478923557,0.04621463555812002,0.14172442597404644,0.0,0.08411305808491773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045541285264986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04254105362758637,0.11449855872784093,0.0,0.0,0.06484882334906247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293991744243129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05123536193985495,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Silicone_Glove,2020/01/26,"What is my problem? Hello.

Let's get straight to the point, I don't know what my problem is. All my life I have felt disconnected from people and have had trouble socializing, though I can be charismatic and gain friendships, but I can sometimes be so awkward I don't retain friendships for long. I tend to feel empathy towards people but most of my emotions are extremely basic, for example, I could feel \*SAD\* for a friend, but that is about it. I could also feel deeply connected to someone I know (be it a family member or a friend). I know this is weird but I sometimes feel such a lack of emotions and a lack of basic hard-wired emotions like, for example, a sex drive. I lack a developed sex drive and almost always feel nothing. I lack complex emotions yet I can be quite emotional at times. I don't know what is wrong with me and it's ruining my social life.

I have had fantasies about hurting animals and I have hurt animals in the past. I will not shy away from this, I can admit it is pretty sick but I can't help myself. Sometimes I just want to strange a rabbit to death or hurt it in ways no human being should. I'm sorry. What could be wrong with me? has anyone had any experience with these emotions/actions? I need answers",2.252326530612244,4.627491620408165,3.596081632653064,86.73534693877552,79.73469387755101,6.3689795918367365,25.310204081632648,7.554174236665415,1.4373559183673477,977,38,189,15,25,319,125,245,0.244,0.649,0.107,-0.9895,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,8,15,0,1,10,0,35,5,0,0,1,47,51,16,1,12,9,0,6,1,2,2,3,0,0,1,13,9,0,1,13,1,0,2,6,12,0,0,4,6,30,3,24,35,6,14,0,5,0,2,8,7,0,4,5,139,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687599701122464,0.0,0.0,0.07736682518650684,0.08049946900834802,0.0,0.0,0.06578981857885748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764625169264536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089497544369413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317286823408265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5441246990259231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946350315779913,0.09120243874610356,0.0,0.2445855264509023,0.0,0.09289023193411908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14948966919332846,0.0,0.05054519347689631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08666438700129513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484603667382842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31070210298394396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21267376773519345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892816838532403,0.1366675036298077,0.047264649134783,0.0,0.0,0.08561615184483479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173508375826483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282929711087738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235391052371264,0.13414140158693486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145515819801926,0.0,0.0,0.09842429742418407,0.0,0.18514352014698765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290006131470354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972383915811963,0.08197160126449148,0.0,0.28704940456452666,0.10829794398898697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09505132834064664,0.0,0.05641270265740578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706262175375835,0.0767915623956299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21155062225665736,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Interstellar-Soul,2020/01/26,"Reactive psychosis or something else? So I’m 18 years old now. It started at the end of August (when I was 17) once I was finishing up my internship before 12th grade would begin. I had become unhealthily obsessed with fluoride and felt a prick on my upper left arm causing me to suspect that someone shot me with a small poison dart. It got much much worse as time went on. I started feeling pricks all over my body that made me think there was a small government controlled fly that would inject drugs and poison in me, I kept checking behind me to see if anyone was following me, there was a blue light in the sky that I felt was following me and reading my mind (the blue light is not a hallucination because other people saw it too), any van that I saw I would memorize and write down it’s license plate to see if it’d come again a second time because I felt that a listening station was in there, any stranger who’d look at me my way would be automatically labeled as someone who is spying on me and wants to rape and kill me and my family, I thought there was a stranger in my house who was hiding and I’d check underneath the beds every day just to be sure. I felt like I was in the Truman Show at one point as if everything was fake and scripted and when anyone would look at me I’d think that it was because my actions were being recorded and put in the internet without my knowledge. Any call we’d get over the intercom made my heart jump because it basically felt like that one Men At Work song (Who can it be now).I’d worry about my moms safety and her lack of care for privacy over the internet. Eventually I’d stop using the computer and then the phone. In fact I went from my Samsung S8 to an iPhone because I heard that they can’t be hacked or wherever but I found ways to make myself believe it was hacked by scrutinizing the battery activity every fucking morning (and if a message would send alittle slower then the previous one I’d suspect that a hacker intercepted it or whatever) I destroyed that iPhone to bits to leave no evidence and got another one. And then another one, but it was the same deal. Sometimes I was able to man up and use it for brief period of time if I absolutely needed to (such as for school or to call my mom) but most of the time I’d put it on airplane mode and shut it off. I never felt safe using it. I always felt someone was watching me through the camera (I also covered my parents laptop cam). I got kaspersky on my pc and would run a full scan (would approx take 2 hours) in addition to a root kit scan atleast once a day and it would only give me temporary solace. Anything that I did would only give me temporary solace. No amount of visits to local technicians or the geek squad telling me everything is normal would help calm me down. This was all during highschool, but actually being in school was the best part about this because socializing with my friends/making new ones and still maintaining great grades would help me distract myself most of the time, but it would get worse. My mom eventually took me to a psychiatrist in December or January and he wasn’t confident in his answer (that being schizophrenia) but he didn’t know what else it could be. His other theory was some sort of OCD because I was lacking the cardinal symptoms of schizophrenia (isolation, lack of hygiene, dipping grades, some form of hallucination, belief in super powers, being emotionally flat etc). He also suspected it was OCD because I talked about some symptoms such as putting things a certain way to avoid dying or writing things a certain way to avoid dying or just doing very specific things to avoid dying (but I’d argue that was because I was scared shitless and not because of OCD) So at the start of 2019 he put me on my first anti psych (forgot the name) and when that didn’t work after a month he put me on risperidone, but it made me very shaky and restless so we switched it out to Thorazine which made me super super tired (all of these anti psychs did but this one especially) and ran it’s 2 month course to no results. It was just getting worse. He put me back on risperidone because he didn’t feel we ran it’s entire course and he added another drug to combat the jitteriness which was very distracting to me. At this point in time (mid to late 12th grade) I was in a prodromal clinic researching the early stages of schizophrenia which they concluded I had and they gave me money to do tests and MRI’s and stuff and that was fine and all because I was also starting to have suicidal thoughts and I felt that “if I’m going to die then I might as well contribute something”. My psychiatrist also tried ruling out any diseases or sub seizures via the week long EEG they sent me home with to moniter my brain when sleeping (it was fucking torturous and it lead to nothing). After my international school trip that my parents almost took me out of because of my deteriorating condition (I’m glad they didn’t because I had the best time of my life there despite the paranoia and fear) and then the graduation, things got way way worse because now I didn’t have school. I was in no way shape or form going back the the computer nor my phone (even though I took it everywhere because I was scared it’d get stolen if I left it home and even at home I’d hide it at night so no one would sneak in and hack it). Nowhere felt safe except when I went to my psychologists who watched it all unfold. Eventually my psychiatrist stopped beating around the bush and put me on clozapine which he described as the best med to fight against paranoia. I took it and took it and took it and it made me feel even worse. I resented taking it but what fucking choice did I have? I was fucking hopeless and out of answers and I spoke openly to my family about jumping out my window or just getting a gun somehow and blowing my brains out. It’s the summer and after voicing my thoughts to my psychiatrist and psychologist they thought I should go to a mental hospital to not commit suicide. So I agreed (I wanted to go to thinking it would help) and there I was. My mom admitted me and after waiting in the ER for an eternity I was wheelchaired off into the psych wing and I stayed there for a month as they experimented with different doses and combinations of meds but nothing was working, I just went through uncomfortable side effects. I met some nice people there though and heard their backstories, but others who were far worse off than I were also incredibly scary to me and felt they were plotting to kill me. On one of the last days I had a session with a medical professional and my mom and she officially diagnosed me with schizophrenia and I was just really devastated because she also told me there’s no cure and I felt like I had lost. We left the hospital in late august and I decided to take a gap semester for the college I was accepted to. I was still on clozapine with an increasing dose, but about a month in I started using my moms laptop or my grandmas computer more frequently to catch up on all the YouTube vids I missed. I’d also make calls to my friends I haven’t spoken to in months from my moms phone. I also had a job at the time too.  But overall I was still very scared to go outside and argued back and forth with my parents about people sneaking and killing us and hidden cameras being everywhere. The psychiatrist realized clozapine wasn’t working so he started tapering off around October. I started watching YouTube vids on my parents laptop now, but it was still unnerving because I had to leave off on a video where nothing about death or something like that was mentioned because then I’d believe that it would happen to me. Then one day, on December 9th 2019 I was invited to my friends party across town and my mom said that if I wanted to go then I had to turn on my phone and so I did and nothing bad happened. I haven’t turned off my phone since. I turned my pc some time later and was playing games and talking to everyone again. I got social media again and reconnected with highschool and middle school friends again and nowadays I’m feeling like myself again. I don’t think about any of the hackers or killers anymore and if I do then I shrug it off. I’m not on anything anymore and haven’t been for 3+ months. So what the hell happened? I visited my psychiatrist a week ago and he was glad to hear the news and he said it might’ve been a “brief” reactive psychosis, but he wasn’t too sure. My psychiatrist thinks it was a result of the mental and physical abuse my dad put me through and I was subconsciously expressing it through fear. It makes more sense to me because now I’m angrier at the world than ever before, especially at my fucking loser of a dad. I’d like to hear your thoughts in the matter because I’m really confused. Thanks! 


TL DR: I started fearing for my own life and felt everyone was going to kill me and became super paranoid about hackers and stuff so I went on meds and nothing worked and they diagnosed me with Schizophrenia at a mental hospital I was in for a month because they didn’t know what else it was, but as I was coming off of my anti psych meds I felt gradually felt back to normal. Thoughts?",6.628852476923917,6.561426518105854,6.833458135343276,77.41410440220659,65.15598885793872,9.847015129171446,34.311131137691845,9.478462496947786,3.0502222404282033,7340,300,1396,126,102,2367,599,1795,0.14300000000000002,0.7759999999999999,0.081,-0.9990000000000001,8,4,5,1,2,6,119.0,5,1,11,21,79,76,21,15,82,0,125,31,8,20,14,295,265,164,11,36,52,14,18,6,3,18,17,10,5,2,96,108,0,11,46,6,3,46,27,43,2,12,135,43,198,33,214,97,33,247,2,4,13,6,105,101,8,36,97,963,294,38,0.02482291881602404,0.029411099723265437,0.024223588015351842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02200401980118796,0.0,0.024856567531054072,0.0,0.0,0.15880703367120694,0.020654656977498312,0.0,0.0,0.08440218004526392,0.07808698418629127,0.0,0.0,0.049235330696471034,0.034713523995548584,0.0,0.040854294271664204,0.044195321021326624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634916936874521,0.020726100357368445,0.3329000600694044,0.027414963594614282,0.042244951236152635,0.055933858239788685,0.07815036553508438,0.0,0.027100198267490848,0.02757266687812859,0.0,0.05542117366164905,0.07604092643959323,0.0,0.02530862009375267,0.02549997541174077,0.0,0.04276549317712357,0.0,0.0,0.0278410141878002,0.019819080815307796,0.0,0.0,0.06403491634999416,0.025591339328613242,0.0,0.050389480159856455,0.10304908279028936,0.025934666873792384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05757341014288714,0.0,0.062209090390247475,0.027922442594495785,0.021985738238347603,0.0,0.02768411612211945,0.049185911302382604,0.022453751208015904,0.04182875941242002,0.04743872538305391,0.04461847768159466,0.024281577746747968,0.046801677353094574,0.08379805455075395,0.050204854394558435,0.017733498162021275,0.3336745274362907,0.0,0.0,0.02111436206411609,0.0,0.02721704923953653,0.0575343765040431,0.11474194227114665,0.06484475276590418,0.0476248112344021,0.0987520576527454,0.0,0.09926577896981717,0.027367355627268115,0.0,0.0,0.06585247539018524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055954467160894035,0.02941527831468273,0.04991483771312722,0.0,0.07469823452868203,0.0,0.024445574837563683,0.02864231552481523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02463291668569609,0.0,0.1098515273941369,0.0,0.027284054011754,0.020233991905900275,0.05600266726942879,0.05256777375927693,0.08091052177347101,0.0,0.0350663233213619,0.07276334567669138,0.0,0.0,0.02196750202048024,0.04168999998720716,0.0,0.027097148181821372,0.0,0.0,0.11744022988394835,0.049708473188458786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029066751251436,0.025006479203635367,0.07504699126121321,0.0526663882609372,0.025064071785462147,0.23257842005230864,0.13869391882143622,0.0,0.03649540298284615,0.018405879772019584,0.01914496527532189,0.02397412967391373,0.0,0.023294627758201916,0.04864238007000792,0.11909130040898855,0.0,0.02604747763302306,0.05287119681327042,0.16820652211926215,0.0377578966462957,0.0,0.0,0.1102516550032294,0.02688080210197421,0.0,0.05162725923021299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046931363515131726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996311163702893,0.0,0.0,0.02482963625038884,0.0,0.03180439484141637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047224560370501684,0.0,0.07455621638411934,0.12561059537101807,0.03956130492447598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020533774957580284,0.0,0.024840845631125225,0.050607679418116745,0.06309713567820277,0.05732968692799141,0.024550501429438387,0.0,0.14055831760675036,0.026457928663438924,0.07929446012619286,0.04150614325384664,0.0,0.0,0.05683260642610648,0.0543044885239524,0.0,0.04679061443385051,0.05160103435142075,0.055991237097860816,0.03990344373773428,0.0216963251596404,0.02285360858147337,0.0,0.0,0.06596497706719773,0.07952762035888288,0.04877678340780174,0.11823974875790885,0.13026999224023972,0.028530293580147144,0.0,0.023719362691526955,0.16547505694941464,0.016853132456895133,0.08100062277377383,0.0,0.0,0.029858914970296437,0.08575612755412919,0.0,0.08192603075833214,0.043923601972022455,0.13792294281076406,0.03982289635766637,0.0,0.02231878512831139,0.11505547216318016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023928407930723518,0.0,0.09035690268800868,0.025208878990825682,0.15178004972887102,0.2821358291611113,0.0,0.0,0.01598514586615744
mentalhealth,asellout,2020/01/26,"Help.    
Hello everybody,

So I've been silently suffering with mental health for as long as I can remember. I'm 18 years old and I don't even remember a time where I didn't suffer. It started in 9th grade where I took off my glasses(because I couldn't bear seeing my reflection), wore a hoodie all the time (even  when sleeping) , and my acne went through the roof. I considered suicide sometimes but I know it wasn't for me. I slowly got ""better"" in the 10th grade, where I took off my hoodie. Mind you I didn't get any help. I came clean to my parents about why they didn't help me and their response was ""Well I told you to take off the hoodie multiple times"". I was always envy of my cousins because they got more love from their parents. I always felt burning inside when I saw their moms cuddling them and kissing them when I didn't get any.Fast Forward to later on in 11th grade where I was relatively happy. In 12th grade, I met this girl in class. I always used to see her around. She is drop-dead gorgeous. But I never talked to her before because I didn't want to have anything based on looks, until she sat next to me in class. We immediately clicked. Being besides her was heaven. We got into this relationship for about  a year. I was happy, very happy. It was the happiest I've ever been. Well,school ended, and I had to travel to uni  in Canada(I live in Lebanon, middle-east). We've always known that I had to travel, but she never accepted it until I told her I bought the ticket. She snapped. Basically, I spent the last 2 months in Lebanon weeping and having sleep-less nights. Let me tell you, being in that bad of a mental state fucking drains you. I worked out for 3 hours everyday for what seemed like forever because I wanted to tire myself and just not think of it. We tried to be friends, but let me tell you, it never works and just drains you out. I got better over time before traveling, and we made up, and hugged goodbye.To also mention, I'm 100% sure I have had ocd since I was a child, but no one took me seriously.When I first arrived to Canada, I was fucking depressed as shit. I hated my decision. I was lonely. A lonely 17 year old 18 hours away from home. That wasn't good for my mental health. I promised myself that I wouldn't ever consider suicide, so my goal is now to die for a cause. That way, I can leave an impact, and just rest. I have no problem dying this moment. I don't fear death, which honestly frightens me sometimes.I see this world as wortheless, the only goal, other than dying for a cause, is to help as much people as I can.Also, throughout these 4 years, I've tried to diagnose myself, as I couldn't have access to any mental health help. I think I have depression, ADHD, ocd, and some form of schizophrenia? (I feel like my brain/me are separated, and my brain often has the upper hand. Somewwhat like being trapped inside a cage inside of my own body-think dean winchester trapped in when micheal took over his body).Because of everything that happened, and having no one to vent to, I've gotten used to burying shit down. My head is fucking fried. I feel locked out of my own brain, like there's some kind of wall preventing me from accessing it. This has been going on for like 2 years, it only got worse after the girl thing). This prevents me from fully using my mental capacity. I don't know how to fully put it into words. I am dead inside. I've lost all emotion except for stress, anger, and laughter. It's like my brain put this wall up as some sort of defense mechanism to keep me going. I don't know what to do. I'm lost. I live a normal life, excel in studies, volunteer, was top of my class, a 9,75 gpa...I feel like my goal is to just make other people happy, as It's the only thing that actually can make me genuinely happy anymore.

Help

I don't know what to do, only a few people know of my mental state, and they choose to do nothing. I only see the gray in the world. I've been so accustomed to depression and sadness I'm afraid of letting go in fear of losing my personality.

tldr; Dead inside, lost emotion, only goal in life is to make other people happy/die for a cause. I don't want to be not depressed.

Thanks",3.1029780729496115,4.738811682198328,4.224778094033315,86.69638282732448,74.35244922341697,6.643959519291588,23.77835757959097,7.285733465282438,0.9400245414294752,3266,96,656,36,68,1065,338,837,0.171,0.682,0.147,-0.9688,2,6,0,0,0,2,134.0,4,6,8,15,28,57,8,4,27,0,64,22,8,11,8,98,133,42,8,8,12,4,5,7,1,1,7,0,2,4,35,29,0,4,19,4,2,15,24,28,1,3,49,13,115,29,108,73,12,98,1,14,8,7,52,44,5,6,45,419,150,15,0.0,0.0,0.045308651962442215,0.0,0.055799430346284255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425956688617384,0.15453279073339735,0.0,0.0,0.06314752377919687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046045748081753615,0.0,0.0,0.038207655264631185,0.04133224230148403,0.0,0.0,0.04362219525168868,0.0,0.03876682789665651,0.141515453209582,0.0,0.07901644428216559,0.0,0.0,0.08212652487510758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073234293114899,0.0,0.05310316363306685,0.0,0.14308815567485392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599591973022017,0.04712512897933222,0.14455997468980747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10445423961582397,0.04112289894244142,0.0,0.0,0.06133270692579621,0.08399657376029578,0.0,0.0,0.04172798586006675,0.0,0.0,0.10449255456743588,0.07042869556978476,0.06633871875548905,0.04457975608250087,0.0,0.0,0.03949304626406864,0.0,0.0,0.035871441220099505,0.12877042140652115,0.048515163530670535,0.0,0.07916113962840637,0.03894299713784543,0.1856702082397448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04105759623537554,0.2471261895556479,0.0,0.0458396782651729,0.04765022754900949,0.1480576767424292,0.0,0.0,0.18672494002726436,0.0,0.04657273602248087,0.0,0.09144772786220287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04126881636204339,0.0,0.048349347554204655,0.12758263831101171,0.03784637092136379,0.0,0.049162307503537804,0.0,0.14243242344687582,0.06558928586314877,0.15878231113402758,0.0,0.08199648328540544,0.04108878927842551,0.03898922196285448,0.05194291485368114,0.15205038023683162,0.0,0.04190458214408635,0.04393286823429104,0.092976478540376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807410698801354,0.0,0.04688072240039198,0.05437785827519823,0.03705971276076103,0.0,0.03413114339070867,0.0,0.10742825149720107,0.0,0.04937847162671327,0.04357109198778147,0.04549121021667138,0.04455051232349106,0.0,0.0974402386488902,0.0,0.06292388034080251,0.21187109814987007,0.0,0.0,0.10310928879856147,0.0,0.0,0.1287539246871848,0.04054058945467618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442691549237419,0.0,0.09334926732120467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04984808052262197,0.10519151087816184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04698929609316135,0.14799371545347825,0.0422678199579696,0.0,0.0,0.09531876041981556,0.03840709569690902,0.0,0.09292638468257552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045920122323121794,0.0,0.032863153307607584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053185020258636084,0.0,0.0,0.10157302745451513,0.0,0.04375940639240939,0.0,0.034909327126460256,0.0373184031050661,0.0811631410589648,0.04274619419086993,0.0,0.0,0.06169160790205778,0.08925075682326461,0.0,0.0,0.10829403574771672,0.05336406569455976,0.0,0.08873106232489082,0.20634024871500672,0.0630453847285108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030096040688887,0.0,0.03830933315846037,0.08215625172563024,0.036853704092581895,0.0,0.0,0.08349168314473615,0.043040761272130384,0.041895547737218965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760269294046248,0.0,0.047315791558550827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949589841100167
mentalhealth,porygon36,2020/01/26,"It feels like I've exhausted my support system. Today I had a panic attack, and there was really no one I could talk to about it. My boyfriend is busy this weekend, and my roommate is out of town, and it made me realize that I was completely on my own. I didn't feel as if I had any friends I could text or call. All my old friends live far away, and the few people I still talk to about my mental health either have their own issues or seem to not really want to get super involved. I really just don't know who to talk to anymore. I don't want to keep telling the same two people about my problems. I feel like a broken record, and I feel like I've worn them out.",4.6525,4.079938744680852,5.510700354609932,86.94562500000002,69.35460992907801,8.752127659574468,26.84485815602837,8.07648339933343,1.3545241134751778,517,13,118,6,8,170,85,141,0.149,0.715,0.136,0.0076,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,1,6,11,1,1,4,0,12,2,0,1,1,29,25,9,0,6,6,0,4,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,7,1,0,0,5,4,0,2,7,4,21,7,16,16,6,11,0,0,0,0,11,6,0,4,7,80,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631129077609003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404560358696226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16112128253378807,0.13306333106163154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461711323252893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849332930368872,0.0,0.0,0.2261554445980268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28644368708085904,0.3035353050792781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188415063106289,0.0,0.07399431905184667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15054299417169004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14782190600321252,0.0,0.12588468192443106,0.0,0.0,0.07783455528243897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075755549071927,0.0,0.12505933204809394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340109950133746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272681490282932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486138267372014,0.0,0.0959701944521759,0.0,0.0,0.1661688972420713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19637280984239355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13551801623234602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721898579414518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893200096579324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131035922598686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16071676502877816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415035166210669,0.12378833580495766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13424593938628446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834910634902667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707067673654932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hazelnutlattee,2020/01/26,"Do I have an actual problem or not? I’ve been feeling like there could something wrong for a long time now, like at least a year, but I’m not sure if there is or I’m just overthinking or something. This is what’s been going on: I’m too scared to be in social situations and I’ll cancel things and try to intentionally avoid people I know so I don’t have to talk to them. I’ve skipped classes purely bc I was too nervous for talking to people. One class I had to attend and had to talk in front of the whole class and I was so nervous I became covered in sweat. When I try to do my school work I break down and cry. I didn’t do a project this week at all bc when I tried I had a mental breakdown. Sometimes I’m very exhausted for no reason and sometimes I cry for no reason. Sometimes I feel sensations of derealization to where it’s difficult to read bc my visions messed up and if I’m driving I don’t even trust myself behind the wheel bc it doesn’t feel real. Many days I can’t make it through the day without getting high to feel better. I have about one friend and haven’t made a single new friend since I started college and now I’m halfway through sophomore year. Do you think I have some mental health issue or am I just lazy/antisocial/dramatic? Please tell me your honest opinion if you think I’m perfectly fine and just lazy or something then I want to know.",1.606864661654139,3.697702477192984,3.077888471177946,91.12480263157896,80.36842105263158,5.6152882205513786,23.16102756892231,6.7097532225279775,0.5956290726817044,1086,37,232,11,28,355,150,285,0.168,0.7,0.132,-0.828,0,1,3,0,0,0,18.0,0,3,1,3,16,19,0,4,9,0,26,3,1,5,4,49,47,24,0,6,15,0,4,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,7,10,0,1,10,1,0,4,11,9,0,2,9,4,29,10,31,36,5,29,0,0,0,0,11,10,0,10,16,148,36,8,0.0,0.0,0.10656629861167936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658110972971533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718964684482637,0.0,0.2399085628487173,0.14085370038911368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212749969183492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22086511303675205,0.07801458889434375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16873981242528138,0.0,0.0570540192664476,0.0,0.0620625368349397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160775989286701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537888215458578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139794781704908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003013943727416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067020627229531,0.0,0.0,0.09664114905618224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333044467983477,0.07289379803375667,0.1107146222608117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22010172001445005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546886201029644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14799745151901667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15141511158855314,0.0,0.0,0.11987201471594547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449244763849293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923247329839808,0.12429683215732185,0.0,0.2245575819161656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933117496207606,0.110519186559938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033378508451076,0.12274865911819835,0.0,0.11131862615681204,0.0,0.2522092322826225,0.3240134448378899,0.0,0.07729438985743636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292246109085014,0.0,0.0,0.26331951515366625,0.09544816664950813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725495686229523,0.13994564527220202,0.0,0.0,0.06367710167652606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224248461630204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010384684061884,0.06441071241365542,0.0,0.08759599655805557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219211619232192,0.0,0.10526771934989587,0.0,0.07950102740662819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193962516295174,0.0,0.1406462020939752
mentalhealth,thrownawayaccount201,2020/01/26,"I don’t want to be a burden on my friends I’m a college student and I’ve always felt like nobody wants to be around me. I’m also in a fraternity and my brothers are great people who love to have a good time. I hang out with my brothers and my friends fairly often, but I always feel like I’m either the one who has to get us to hang out or when they invite me I’m just a tag a long they invite so they can have more people there. 

I have a few friends and brothers I feel like would understand my feelings but those same brothers are either dealing with or finally recovered from dealing with much harder personal issues. I have a good financial future, a loving family, and friends that are fun to hang out with so I feel like I shouldn’t burden my friends with my issues when I’m already a very good position with my life than most people, including them. 

I’d like to also mention I’m not suicidal at all, just the thought scares me and I have absolutely no interest in that. I’ve also never talked to a therapist before about this because doing so will escalate the issue and make it a bigger part of my life than it already is.",3.2453927203065116,4.662709612068966,4.7970114942528745,83.62691570881229,73.56896551724137,7.569348659003833,26.68199233716475,8.167268648758528,1.7277808429118773,898,32,178,14,18,302,116,232,0.047,0.679,0.27399999999999997,0.9953,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,4,0,14,21,0,1,15,0,18,4,0,1,2,43,37,19,1,4,9,4,5,5,5,3,2,0,0,1,8,17,0,0,7,0,0,3,5,3,0,1,2,5,26,18,27,30,9,19,0,0,0,2,23,9,0,4,12,130,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22721319871192114,0.2469844383533846,0.1713233554807939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09164628952895863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275665425101551,0.0,0.08760187600531133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122714567374367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705099938232922,0.0,0.20821609687517104,0.2206400047824438,0.0988470260884089,0.11277541659208425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976900725466114,0.0,0.05378651720665257,0.0,0.0,0.2590457951534059,0.0,0.1135014539773696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223555102327902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454316133725932,0.2514780030584328,0.0,0.0,0.09110647932279617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18583068587251936,0.0,0.06871914674215779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756792391354722,0.0,0.07940048811037427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976079490117189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148355596373584,0.0,0.21411527906836675,0.08989095175957826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306974335775644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260931616689868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274637390293435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953153216158635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817298754564959,0.06003029355389156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10717336787209072,0.12383477269314805,0.0,0.0,0.0849435705107036,0.12144378033563688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07313189860447775,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tomatoesoverpotatoes,2020/01/26,"Feel miserable after my boyfriend left Okay, so my boyfriend and I are in a long distance relationship. 


We'll have been dating for a year this March. 

We try meeting whenever we can, we usually average about every 1.5 - 2 months. When we're together, the whole world stops. I love him so so much. We're only together for 2-3 days max, but they're the highlight of my month. 

So anyway, we've been dating for quite a while and this time our trip happened pretty spontaneously. He had a meeting in a town close by and I had some time so we met up for a day and halfish. 

He left last night to catch his flight and I'll be leaving the hotel in a while. 

Around an hour before he had to leave, I felt this overwhelming sense of sadness. I always feel sad when we have to leave, but this feeling just took over my entire brain and I've legit never felt this miserable to see someone go. 

We're going to be meeting for our anniversary and that's assuring because we usually don't know when we'll be meeting next - this is why it's just so much more confusing because this time I know exactly when I'll be seeing him next. 

But I just feel ABSOLUTELY miserable. I cried before he left. While he was leaving. After he left. Oh my goodness. I don't even remember the last time I cried! 

Why is it so different this time? Why do I feel like a lump of sadness unable to do much else. 

I hate feeling this crippled. I don't know whether it's other emotions mixing with this and turning me into a blubbering fool. 

I can't make head or tail of this. How do I stop feeling this sad? It's sad but definitely not a situation that warrants this many tears or misery. I have a big lump in my throat. My stomach kinda hurts. I don't know.  

Please help. I have work that I need to get done.",1.5266438304599852,3.7520233537604497,3.1494858089287057,89.76391553113001,81.47910863509749,6.332334562975233,23.35172777234059,7.534196372845213,1.061860137017241,1380,49,290,22,37,455,172,359,0.2,0.7190000000000001,0.081,-0.9938,1,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,10,0,0,2,19,18,1,5,16,1,29,7,4,2,3,54,55,30,0,1,11,0,9,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,21,18,0,2,14,1,0,5,7,13,0,0,11,11,40,5,29,38,6,55,0,10,2,1,27,16,0,5,35,176,61,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927700307127649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411692659592475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150613539151752,0.0,0.14169219172805367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294303028499963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829091552953802,0.10738854442076493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698648438585015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520144382005294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06955105170263441,0.09365360768197653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054990867710380524,0.0,0.07014812924365701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946828527716188,0.059479254870860726,0.15988072871199213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04349866610143829,0.0,0.0946344394978975,0.06983253507606976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362443160440837,0.0,0.0,0.08219965528070662,0.08544633005314216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05580582253712819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199197715778946,0.0,0.089128995954158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830248254065259,0.13573213255841896,0.0,0.3526311599499322,0.3618385575389168,0.0,0.0,0.040675463870868615,0.0,0.0,0.07368036693124533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751432457051727,0.0,0.05557510272375743,0.08441015108469455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291086364587382,0.0,0.1836117743774072,0.0617344645754648,0.06421340328347581,0.0,0.17709083046020258,0.07813162912883473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332116589445261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139185652608398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470292337252971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855471907515315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938751733075621,0.09431464464717912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13269107522542745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935850445951278,0.0,0.0,0.0705439047302129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392141838427106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427409163935495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250227072271558,0.05652645358617644,0.0905603741694883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18339299482808846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22538113565331744,0.0929541508448352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606125333560139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05361517262044214
mentalhealth,polipioo,2020/01/26,"Am I normal? What's wrong with me? So, for as long as I can remember I've always been a little weird. I don't know if the things I did in the past are relevant, so I'll skip that part and list the things I do that I feel aren normal. I'm 19 btw (It's just a list, no order.)

- I feel like I can't trust anyone enough to have a serious relationship with. I don't trust people enough to let them have sex with me, because I feel like they would only care about their pleasure and end up physically hurting me.
- I'm very pessimistic, that's why I won't try it with anyone. The only time I had a S.O. he touched me without my permission (I was 17), how lucky. I'm like that with everything though.
- I don't have faith in anything, not in humanity, not in God. I feel much worse believing there's a god.
- I feel like my mom loves my brother much more than me (it has gotten much better since therapy, but I've been having a lot of nightmares about it, recently.)
- *BEWARE THIS PART MAY BE GROSS* I bite my own mouth when I'm nervous (I rip off some pieces and eat it) it started since I was I child and I feel like I'm addicted to it, bc I can't stop.
- I'm very depressed (and I feel like I've always been for no reason)
- my libido is almost zero
- I have no memory of certain years of my life ( 12, 13, 14, 15 years old. It's all blurry.  I do have memory of me deciding not to care and then me realizing I had no memory of anything that happened so I didn't have anything to add to any conversation. I also remember trying so hard in those years to remember what happened the last day). It felt like nothing had meaning.
- sometimes I immediately forget what I did or said (mostly said)

That's all that I can think about but I always remember/discover new things. Yes I take antidepressants, yes I go to therapy, though I don't know if I should talk to them about this bc this wouldn't make me less depressed. I just want to know if it's normal and what could it be... I don't want to treat my depression and have no results.

PS: y'all are awesome in this subreddit, I mean it.",0.7020148489503342,2.740520297235029,2.962116743471583,91.00349257552486,83.35483870967742,6.346257040450588,20.473937532002047,7.554174236665415,0.6410303737839227,1595,47,359,27,45,544,195,434,0.133,0.743,0.124,-0.3938,0,0,0,0,0,0,72.0,0,1,4,1,16,27,0,1,11,2,44,6,1,4,3,69,78,26,0,12,12,2,10,7,0,5,2,2,0,2,31,14,1,1,20,0,0,1,19,9,0,1,15,12,59,18,39,54,16,27,1,4,0,2,16,9,0,10,23,236,90,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258766248015015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586093276743575,0.0,0.0,0.0605838360891761,0.18911077030409293,0.0,0.0,0.05151820015245085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594384388178664,0.0,0.1870277262014418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04618151912723353,0.0,0.0,0.08535359224580663,0.0,0.06700200567064635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448114668045862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06048678906949155,0.0,0.0,0.0488577966157872,0.0,0.19575137985588825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751959121863769,0.0,0.0,0.06709931322005831,0.156557023987942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680866199920816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681394922434905,0.2706085041950869,0.07273978959606725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043055152882240384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339855205109036,0.0,0.0678645014086877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110076135933819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490424016245795,0.061753075828859125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746793181199547,0.05351028440591354,0.2590815410046659,0.07592965754507898,0.0,0.06704365724520016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440694537217123,0.0683747681936837,0.0,0.050569212580812095,0.0,0.0,0.1650458623883255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887271335065768,0.0,0.0,0.1670730668188578,0.0,0.0,0.07316777898148642,0.0,0.0,0.2226809666818735,0.07269207320943125,0.0,0.07949552757078743,0.0,0.0,0.1152351086024209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16407757977403534,0.0723198110284984,0.052521223838021484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789208686377508,0.07480212113902555,0.08133599659614668,0.2574579486620421,0.0,0.14412686686376194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253359957743608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492683517218042,0.0,0.05362207125213537,0.0,0.0,0.06333727975276263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05696076724645351,0.060891602567320485,0.0,0.0,0.17327229661728394,0.0,0.1509912224620798,0.04854282035250528,0.14886416968425684,0.0,0.04417523819679452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286974230339314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12501696188534753,0.08936834398502064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836002695433184,0.0,0.0,0.07302823863337403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720411740636167,0.053816479137093934,0.08282974125191203,0.0,0.1463574656052439
mentalhealth,Chase470,2020/01/26,"How do i cope? I have brain cancer. I'm in  israel right now i moved here 2 years ago from the philippines to study in a program that accepts kids from all over the world and put them in a boarding school. I developed brain cancer recently and is dependent on the program to give us housing, rides to the hospital, insurance. The thing is i cant study while getting treatment so I'm afraid they'll just kick me out and i wont be able to get treatment. It's giving me a lot of anxiety. How can I cope?",1.568365384615383,3.573317567307697,3.1025384615384617,91.34246153846158,80.05769230769229,6.467692307692308,24.823076923076925,7.554174236665415,1.1783030769230771,393,15,85,6,10,129,71,104,0.111,0.841,0.048,-0.7998,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,2,0,6,2,0,1,8,0,9,4,2,3,1,11,15,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,12,1,13,12,2,16,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,2,5,56,15,3,0.2163993614682897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19182497715131167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16554491921214246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4831465099286427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22611946962582674,0.4151799720877137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496958087999773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839749986059424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22999827444177576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21754112818032773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136682628364469,0.0,0.0,0.1848038723078964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21900770681643675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376612015704118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603017872957398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393540938538189
mentalhealth,majinszc,2020/01/26,"What does it mean when lately I’ve began to cry a lot and feel very strong emotions I’ve always been a very “cold “ person I guess you could say. Almost never showed emotion, and only rarely cried when by myself. The last 2 months or so have been very strange. I find myself crying constantly, when I think of my mistakes, my family, when I realize my parents won’t always be here etc. I can’t help it at times and even start crying in public and in front of family when I would usually be able to hold back those tears. Could there be a reason why I’ve changed so suddenly?",5.167869458128081,5.2742118706896575,5.724581280788177,83.53568965517245,68.22413793103448,8.697536945812809,25.19211822660099,8.418075326091056,1.4212600985221682,451,10,92,6,7,146,79,116,0.136,0.7909999999999999,0.073,-0.7443,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,11,2,0,0,4,0,11,0,0,1,1,20,17,12,0,4,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,4,4,0,1,6,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,3,12,1,8,7,2,20,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,4,16,58,16,0,0.12641656852656305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658793254386302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103774240685202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720653796784348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337319672623056,0.0,0.0,0.13661140026847146,0.0,0.20186668671731614,0.0,0.5554506578467381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062799102381732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844032487748745,0.0,0.0,0.14098789061784495,0.08349695124874179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23834858004072704,0.0,0.06392001543991263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554245340403868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926210256196606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473436113645723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030463759437889,0.14260339561610882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747484586201292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770470341241015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090449891348788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750025098192937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614549691320036,0.0,0.0,0.1403706389565026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110382071523037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997728709506318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005315292818503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894782978656087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100263263450921,0.0,0.0,0.07371451772295322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922999023373386,0.3129207253454921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407129025582274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980270321272686,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ryu289,2020/01/26,"This guy does realize that bullying causes mental health effects right? https://donotlink.it/wJ5q

The guy talks about this transgendered student who planned a shooting here: https://heavy.com/news/2019/05/alec-maya-mckinney/

>See, if you advocate locking up teenage dopeheads as juvenile delinquents, you’re racist or something. If you advocate locking up these maladjusted weirdos in psychiatric wards, you’re stigmatizing mental illness. Disapproving of sexual perversion makes you guilty of transphobia. Instead, now everyone is required to celebrate diversity and inclusion, which means keeping the drug-addled misfits in public high school and interpreting their unpopularity as “bullying,” because how dare your normal teenager not want to hang out with a couple of losers like this? And then one day, the freaks decide it would be really cool to shoot up the school more or less randomly. which then becomes an argument for (a) gun control and (b) more “anti-bullying” policies to protect deranged misfits from social disapproval.

>The world has gone crazy because expressing common sense will get you banned from social media and/or fired from your job.

Even though its shown that bullying is the cause of mental health issues and drug use and not the other way around. http://homoresponse.blogspot.com/2011/06/mental-health-and-substance-abuse.html

He acts as if it's all about them not being popular. https://kathrynhgordon.com/2018/05/14/fact-checking-5-suicide-related-statements-from-a-viral-ben-shapiro-video/

We see these people be harassed and he thinks ""aw does no one want to be with the freak?"" 

Even though it turns out the ""malajustments"" and drug use are in a response to being bullied.

See here: https://jech.bmj.com/content/70/3/223
>However, this perception is not borne out by the research literature available on the subject. Those with mental illness make up a small proportion of violent offenders. A recent meta-analysis by Large et al4 found that in order to prevent one stranger homicide, 35 000 patients with schizophrenia judged to be at high risk of violence would need to be detained. This clearly contradicts the general belief that patients with severe mental illness are a threat.

Off course he promotes the idea that ""Crazy People are Dangerous"" and he focuses on Transgender people being violent, because he sees gender dysphoria as a mental illness.",12.527579812206572,15.357976230985921,8.693116197183102,59.08286678403758,52.887323943661976,11.437793427230046,40.42546948356807,11.291866151862983,5.419856807511739,2002,91,236,49,24,557,217,355,0.24600000000000002,0.7120000000000001,0.042,-0.9977,2,0,4,3,1,1,107.0,1,6,2,6,12,13,6,1,21,2,18,8,0,9,2,60,35,23,0,9,9,0,1,1,0,3,8,0,0,2,21,19,0,6,10,0,0,3,5,10,0,3,2,5,9,3,48,22,4,33,1,1,3,0,22,21,0,6,8,154,30,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198541362235658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478804129561765,0.08930707813380727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661376123040983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069498198723733,0.0,0.08947361964016835,0.0,0.052150090023138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141527905017771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813270034254571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068187940162562,0.0,0.0,0.07726827613196087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866235166128324,0.0,0.0,0.04224769718803998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16013461070166216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578614782747041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17087287233515158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128473752444048,0.0,0.08440019723955781,0.08024427271335861,0.07187494919481069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03950568683168648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795366026131477,0.0,0.0,0.08808375712461446,0.0,0.0,0.5704377759976661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0599590562011229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922879092168403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16438504061853326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818113429166587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051803052105070496,0.0,0.0798426785800112,0.0,0.0,0.06905675171944113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16367580013766414,0.2577500814671617,0.0,0.0,0.09135242665252696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16485974764716854,0.0,0.06225246068258701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499479664444832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051813889014842913,0.15889541461116918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795596757440874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13967972559033254,0.0,0.0,0.0953904495670941,0.06418546357271282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11488582892094293,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yummyfood123,2020/01/26,"Situations making depression worse So, I've been struggling with depression for a long time, off and on since I was 10 (I'm 19 now, female), but lately it's gotten really bad again. About a year and a half ago, my brother kicked me out of the house (had abusive parents and he became my legal guardian) because of an ugly situation that happened between him, me, and his son (my nephew). He was excessively spanking him, and I told him off for it (did cuss him out). He put his hand on my throat, pushed me into the kitchen and told me to get out of his house. He claimed later that it was ""self defense."" I never once touched him. Anyway, I had only been 18 for about 3 months, and I didn't even had a car. I was about to start college, and didn't have anywhere to go or any means to get there. Now, at this point I had already been in a relationship with my boyfriend for a year, so he helped me out a little bit for transportation. I had to move on campus, and it ended up being a really bad situation for me. I was terribly lonely, and also my roommate's constantly had parties, usually when I had to work the next morning (I always work early Saturday morning). I ended up being able to move out, but every situation I end up in is temporary, for one reason or another. I haven't been able to sign a lease anywhere due to lack of credit and meeting income requirements. 

My current problem: 
I am staying with my current roommate until May, we already established that so that she could pay off some bills and stuff. (She has a 2 y/o son who's room I am staying in right now, while he stays in her room). However, she is gone all the time, and I've been really depressed because I am alone often. She doesn't want me to get a dog because it makes her uncomfortable, but that's honestly the only way I can see myself actually being able to be at my house by myself and not feel absolutely crippled. My depression and anxiety are taking a huge toll on me, and my boyfriend of 2 1/2 years. I've considered trying to move out sooner, but it's so hard to find a roommate, and I've been looking too. I'm wondering if it would be worth it to try and live by myself and get a dog, but I just hate being by myself. That's one of the biggest contributors to my depression and anxiety right now. And things can't stay the way they are now, or I don't know what will happen with my mental health. I've been feeling suicidal and just awful all the time, but my roommate doesn't want me to get a dog, and it's not like she's going to be home any more often, she works 2 jobs. I just don't know what to do.",5.9589460916442025,5.012810390566042,6.998557951482482,78.60023584905663,66.79245283018868,10.06199460916442,32.13611859838275,9.330973305703688,2.6163665768194067,2017,70,420,33,28,683,236,530,0.17,0.7859999999999999,0.044000000000000004,-0.9971,6,3,0,0,0,0,73.0,1,0,1,4,25,16,2,1,24,1,50,4,2,3,3,76,80,41,1,7,15,5,5,1,0,3,1,0,4,1,21,35,1,2,8,0,4,10,11,13,0,3,26,7,66,3,66,43,6,80,0,6,2,0,36,31,0,9,34,293,87,10,0.21082047023721606,0.08326259453756453,0.06857678924436066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229320889533335,0.0,0.0,0.07278214234619032,0.15509708752657114,0.05619768462712122,0.0584731732377051,0.0,0.0,0.09557676606884907,0.07368788160638144,0.10751805512697858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173508577807671,0.12851420189174734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672045049198771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594067766075573,0.0,0.05610766362220816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30263227016175503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867243617994152,0.0,0.0,0.046414977432157487,0.0,0.059208446262392626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106477613220424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422869682065639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18357499067486904,0.0,0.079876087730302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242852303903168,0.0,0.06295124399069922,0.06938052268749556,0.0,0.07469743381750914,0.0,0.0,0.04710283909840613,0.0,0.07049004029946343,0.0,0.0,0.24325851735559303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06973559552607593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724094467384501,0.0,0.07927155770697028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03433207760154182,0.07043249856748532,0.06205277920984189,0.062189827342209264,0.05901203283568514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381620062074797,0.0,0.0,0.07654843207565942,0.0,0.0,0.0708191494984418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609162933291262,0.22406879596393228,0.0,0.0,0.05419924777222493,0.0,0.0747366539344561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483897345560299,0.09523827113959432,0.10689231169975226,0.0,0.0,0.07803039442594946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643116252406506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724223936353341,0.0,0.07064426719766706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350569916006245,0.07225285183453116,0.0,0.07544742922542487,0.0,0.1200263531194022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599887325358872,0.0,0.07331057623117812,0.0,0.0,0.05813095717961751,0.31596138877076474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049739937973635615,0.2996087609556592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346510984115992,0.0804463333553395,0.07686779229752755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05283691889571434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04668658423949626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293111156863247,0.0,0.0,0.13429866254962142,0.0,0.09542217378130263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773963211582009,0.0,0.08289825034396521,0.11155965092609632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762086023243644,0.15347981319237547,0.0,0.07161469002279143,0.04992027110724315,0.0,0.0,0.13576147081214132
mentalhealth,skullzhead,2020/01/26,"Why does time move so slowly for me? And why am I really awkward? Thank you for reading Hello. I am a mid-20's person with a hearing disability, who has been treated for depression and anxiety since my teens. About a year ago I stopped taking meds because after almost 4 years, I have felt no good benefits from them. I tried general counselling at 20 years old, but my counsellor said I was mentally stable enough to stop counselling, so I did. I've been medicated since I was 19 for depression anxiety, but did not feel like it helped much at all. Since Feburary of 2019, I stopped taking all my meds without my doctors permission. ( THEY HAVE SINCE BEEN INFORMED. Do not worry. ) My problem right now is almost overwhelming anxiety over nothing. When I am nervous, time seems to slow to a crawl, especially when I am out of my house. Parties, doctor appointments, meeting people I don't know well- it really feels like one minute turns into hours. It's gotten so bad that my eyes tear up if I'm in an unfamiliar place for more than a half hour. I am painfully shy and awkward, I can't look at people's faces or touch them without getting upset. It's starting to affect my family too, they are worried and embarrassed by my reactions. I'm really really ashamed about this and want to change, but after talking to my doctor and counsellors, I really don't know how. Does anyone have tips? I could use anything at this point. Thank you!",4.440310828877003,6.384749040441183,5.283288770053474,79.20502673796794,71.46323529411767,8.62192513368984,29.275401069518715,9.218907990703514,2.7236705882352936,1137,46,203,25,22,370,163,272,0.195,0.7090000000000001,0.095,-0.9826,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,4,0,11,20,0,7,6,0,23,7,2,3,2,39,44,17,0,4,9,0,4,2,0,0,5,2,0,1,8,9,0,3,7,1,0,1,8,12,1,2,10,8,33,8,32,33,5,32,0,3,2,0,15,12,0,5,21,132,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039779644272202,0.0,0.1816407433444109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081498496378736,0.0,0.0,0.06341774960257457,0.0,0.07463625429220422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572856290072844,0.05528830952264322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594585145001346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241451514168096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562351215160237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784979783675593,0.15873985869310395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937146867813282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550146207396403,0.0,0.0917186882333266,0.12958851958228093,0.08708375293414095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04738566207771126,0.0,0.0,0.07607269844615179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222259163345374,0.0,0.060792573329636924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17863739148332022,0.10465265319784836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09968986759641088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862036281040822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616299573788803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20148878969206216,0.09136811559561024,0.09140167389978464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639701109496916,0.06667304443962474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702662708805596,0.0,0.09517169242290367,0.0,0.06145892363245624,0.0,0.09650845670416937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257563516723799,0.07919349467372429,0.09475950698864558,0.0,0.08573838427615947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678518844302377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072197075998904,0.0,0.2905154700763021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745510688067063,0.08627402233931028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256753095446917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001033945899421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419610546949292,0.0,0.0,0.22748132977037194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363863549612866,0.0728991560627656,0.0,0.1670040099323801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577279781255976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06157759922659836,0.09865275588035956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833345621740392,0.0,0.0,0.053495692185406236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154787896973058,0.0,0.1636806411159624,0.0,0.0,0.1748581656801511,0.0,0.0,0.18421527884138644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752185075817594
mentalhealth,Pedro01_,2020/01/26,i don’t know what to do So i’ve been looking for help everywhere and i find anyone to talk to is this a safe place to talk abt life issues and drugs?,0.4446078431372591,1.8221585588235318,2.3652941176470605,98.29049019607844,81.05882352941177,5.7098039215686285,17.215686274509807,6.42735559955562,-0.5333019607843132,117,2,30,1,3,39,26,34,0.0,0.816,0.184,0.7248,0,0,1,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,5,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,5,5,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281873649958318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.378455519411235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982725721693084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218741554317824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34061842726559777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17935016888934868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305064711902927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740468309981135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409600993972405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5246060113021442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,directorsnap,2020/01/26,"Emotional flash backs to my past I recently found some poems/lyrics I wrote in 2015. That was right in the middle of some very intense depression/soon to be drug addiction. I have been good and happy and have completely moved on from it all this past 2 years. But when I read these things I wrote I felt like it was 2015 again if that makes sense. For the past 2 weeks I will randomly feel dissociated, or confused, lost, incredibly scared and sad, etc. it goes away eventually. It feels much like how people describe a flash back. But it’s only with my emotions. Has anyone else had this kind of thing happen? People keep telling me to look at how far I have come and stuff like that. I’m pretty sure they don’t understand how bad it was and how scary it was for me? Or what I’m trying to tell them when I explain why I’m acting wierd all the sudden. Maybe I tried to hard on pushing my past away instead of working through it idk.",3.7359511077158127,5.06330677005348,4.1957563025210085,88.77161764705883,72.20855614973263,7.481894576012222,24.052330022918266,7.957251820313856,1.0348383498854092,734,20,157,10,14,231,121,187,0.113,0.768,0.11900000000000001,0.3174,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,2,11,12,0,2,4,0,13,2,0,5,3,33,30,16,0,1,5,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,18,7,0,1,6,1,0,4,1,5,0,0,11,5,17,7,20,17,6,27,0,2,1,0,7,10,0,7,16,98,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031988534557326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358748251932996,0.12248627832510345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246298052260224,0.1838428982546892,0.09981369517756647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297600191302184,0.12533891708829062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386323213544641,0.0,0.09986312070966973,0.2689403337516181,0.0,0.0,0.13332242342883405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088940868201073,0.0,0.11478035284627384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310731015283399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026728150107404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571178034700182,0.1272561078273229,0.10708735151258633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625561285748714,0.0,0.12448599229409278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520851197874146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003862974444313,0.0,0.13049567657044167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979610740443578,0.0,0.12009735227317195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270556513012766,0.08787810938629383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091809654051897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.456470576762608,0.16575259943760318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12161855290669092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957568965379825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180346259683335,0.0,0.0,0.10208935878352343,0.0,0.0,0.1196837373720993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684852326658922,0.0,0.0,0.11266818276818336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20897229566755549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883856586267206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623241610177425,0.0,0.0,0.12444883237134215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863577470222143,0.0,0.0,0.09589045622658113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786927014734207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702897493096035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698199127393195
mentalhealth,journey83,2020/01/26,Loss of a therapist Has anyone ever lost a therapist? My therapist of 5 1/2 years suddenly stopped seeing patients in June and I just found out he passed away. I have had a new provider since June but am unable to process this loss. He took me from a very dark place and got me out of it so I truly feel like I am living today because of him.  Any thoughts or advice,1.950742857142856,3.9379463600000015,3.2205714285714286,91.056,78.73333333333333,6.419047619047619,24.04761904761905,7.447530270364453,1.018161904761905,287,10,61,4,7,93,57,75,0.106,0.78,0.114,0.5529,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,3,4,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,0,1,12,12,5,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,6,2,8,1,10,6,0,15,0,3,1,0,3,5,0,1,9,36,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18199077775762346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664903334598798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022276959289528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749778464908345,0.0,0.0,0.1135296795813069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16846400673308767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941681286392272,0.13304931216577473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20420165538786228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489524908494268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098705929979947,0.0,0.16445261388520488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20330207240027584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987096701081695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19458031107457927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840851930316654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540589797518817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15570429929063032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6487141503061241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478531110929317,0.0,0.0,0.1765329725818389,0.0,0.20691858901310897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366683354405053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993193012062825
mentalhealth,geeboi3000,2020/01/26,"How does ptsd start Idk how to properly word that, but I’d like to know what causes it, and how it can properly be treated",8.96076923076923,4.771442769230767,9.073076923076924,76.3219230769231,63.61538461538462,13.476923076923079,37.53846153846154,11.20814326018867,3.6902769230769232,96,3,22,2,1,32,21,26,0.044000000000000004,0.838,0.11800000000000001,0.4678,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,8,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4995231384303176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255295493265068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26723587119183145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375621558336613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5684121141570924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441774492411963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,genuinegoo,2020/01/26,"Is medication worth it? Anyone who has tried antidepressants or anti anxiety medication, does it actually help? I’ve heard and read so many mixed things I don’t know what to think anymore. I’ve always tried to avoid prescription drugs as much as possible but taking things into my own hands doesn’t seem to be having consistent results for me. I am definitely concerned about the negative health  effects of medication so I’d like to get some input on whether or not people think it’s worth it. Thank you.",6.946950354609928,7.956804829787238,7.341276595744683,70.33333333333334,64.53191489361703,10.947517730496457,32.687943262411345,10.864195022040775,3.7465943262411363,410,16,71,11,6,134,72,94,0.094,0.7440000000000001,0.161,0.78,0,1,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,3,3,0,1,1,0,7,6,1,2,0,15,15,9,0,0,5,0,1,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,8,2,0,1,5,1,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,2,5,2,11,13,3,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,4,1,44,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.1807355894620376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410729416296687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14168306277757325,0.0,0.18367585574328466,0.12950123692790466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207613940374824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147816461566258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676316000122127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19686667866882165,0.0,0.0,0.1241405362308649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178507786714447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048292215403393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18777111316674355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5597305514412139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13614866151494648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839940864483634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087933810496233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18525740038998192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860575242254772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392528257330172,0.0,0.0,0.17051398065759565,0.0,0.0,0.2460869753591829,0.23734669422162505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514871724988341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,michelleeeexuwu,2020/01/26,"I feel lost and hopeless I feel as if life has no meaning. I wake up and do the same shit everyday of my life. Yet when people ask me to do something I say no because I’m tired. Not sleep wise, emotion wise. I’m tired of being tossed around in people’s lives and those same people never consider how I feel, or reach out to me. I am used and abused mentally and I’m sick of that shit. Nobody ever considers my feelings and I’m tired of it. I’m not heard and I don’t trust my parents enough and don’t like them enough to ask them for help. I’m stuck with no place to go and nothing to live for. I feel like a broken record waiting to just give out already. Please help me, anyone, anyway.",0.9618367346938792,2.78081753061225,2.55261904761905,95.4632142857143,81.17687074829931,5.2884353741496595,20.02380952380953,6.1826913282559595,-0.09375374149659876,535,14,123,4,14,175,84,147,0.266,0.632,0.102,-0.9788,1,0,1,0,1,1,15.0,0,0,2,1,7,9,2,0,2,0,7,10,4,2,2,31,28,14,0,1,5,1,5,2,0,0,6,2,0,0,3,13,0,1,6,0,0,1,8,4,0,0,3,7,16,5,19,24,4,12,0,2,0,0,10,6,2,2,7,74,19,0,0.0,0.15050259586920225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401740746498758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881809116721197,0.0,0.0,0.11307823579477973,0.2375004708233881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743261384134327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288483371997546,0.0,0.2624993679659932,0.0,0.0,0.1149004245201488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211355994297997,0.09074592695745698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12185293623836067,0.07219063144773233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028293668944405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17944152844032982,0.12411496012855515,0.0,0.2243289295474996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386616338861524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13836630723663532,0.0,0.0,0.128010253535349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796869205412258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188289472775796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104505129857356,0.0,0.0,0.2641872151966101,0.0,0.1327129799373376,0.1394341397656852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101453416534276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26077649472288666,0.0,0.0,0.1271156735466466,0.0,0.0,0.09778923359113124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379859935661571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097078988037402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brokenman4006,2020/01/26,"It's been a while but I'm back sliding tonight. I try not to let my mind wander too much but I'm lost in fantasy tonight. Things that can never be, things that I wish so much could be. This spiral sucks. I can't break the cycle. I'm not even sure what I think I'll accomplish with this post. I guess I need to call my psychiatrist Monday. If you read this then thanks and I hope you are having a better day.",-0.463295454545456,1.6816128977272733,1.3413636363636383,99.69454545454546,90.47727272727272,4.5636363636363635,14.818181818181818,6.1124844417494595,-0.8546727272727273,317,6,77,3,11,103,63,88,0.09300000000000001,0.703,0.203,0.9033,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,3,4,6,1,0,3,0,9,0,0,0,2,16,20,7,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,0,11,4,4,14,2,12,0,1,0,0,3,1,1,3,8,51,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707406925798728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19638282117010006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22673515293062205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17728672689855812,0.0,0.0,0.14320215998797725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666016898198894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446101706597675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22054310319741469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270584417164337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423908936144938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22420450731312455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3264606770600217,0.16464528354662014,0.1712565916592262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212659965046894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22210742172832004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092769831218068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20443135082737135,0.0,0.0,0.2950367623797469,0.1422789648303729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507555632430268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25534347408160657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CautiousElis,2020/01/26,"But what do I do about NOW? Yes, I know the stupid thing I said isn't going to matter in ten years. I know that it's not actually going to HURT me to do that thing I'm anxious over. But being rational about it doesn't help. What the hell am I supposed to do about how crippling my anxiety is right now? What do I do to make it hurt less now, when it actually matters to me?",1.9457723577235768,2.6854570731707312,4.130243902439022,89.79260162601628,75.82926829268294,7.417886178861789,23.422764227642283,7.793537801064563,0.827871544715447,288,8,70,4,6,100,46,82,0.26,0.6970000000000001,0.043,-0.9601,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,8,4,2,0,2,1,11,0,0,2,0,9,18,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,11,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,4,0,1,1,1,9,0,11,16,1,10,1,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,5,54,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.4670295151012544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830579475354777,0.2703321768282655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719906467765687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16039257849790653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5123346930512798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630175700443364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15972946228359985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20435430892288395,0.2276217659903197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3179503304158969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15409638980738533
mentalhealth,scotchtwink,2020/01/26,"Hardly any friends, but depression and anxiety have tired me out too much to do anything about it. So I have GAD, some depression, I’ve been told I probably have avoidant personality disorder, ocd, and maybe adhd. Because of all this, my body is just...exhausted. I need more friends, as I feel isolated and lonely, but the thought of having to go out and socialize makes me feel exhausted. Like, too much effort, and probably nothing good to come of it, because I’m so terrible at maintaining conversation and socializing. But the thought of being alone for longer makes my anxiety and depression worse. 

Also, it’s worth noting that I’m on cipralex and Wellbutrin, but wondering if wellbutrin is helping. I don’t know if I’m still depressed. I’m not unbearably sad, I can’t cry, and I just sometimes feel...underwhelmed by my surroundings. I also see a therapist. 

I don’t know how to get over this. Is it normal to be emotionally and socially exhausted if you’re on meds for depression and anxiety? I don’t know what’s normal.",5.083630017452009,7.0265733141361295,6.056628272251309,74.31904363001748,69.7853403141361,10.74778359511344,34.72286212914485,10.793553405168565,4.376055218150087,817,42,144,27,15,270,107,191,0.307,0.617,0.076,-0.9953,0,4,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,1,10,15,0,1,3,0,15,4,1,3,1,40,35,24,0,6,9,0,3,1,2,0,3,0,0,1,8,14,0,1,8,0,1,2,5,11,0,0,4,4,15,4,20,29,5,10,0,7,1,0,9,7,0,5,2,94,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089231316645875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280106651712447,0.0,0.1741954429310392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406460430597793,0.0,0.2499545403008805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962615473344578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13278476073643594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12097783854006798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381894307750732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963586402300508,0.0,0.0,0.4690332234845431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482378353106012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12251251454101272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652091216561914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682918943356613,0.0,0.0569025699614634,0.0,0.061897792471789524,0.0913510934676918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756469419318058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300211720908263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17956728100741293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053209411599647816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14540060439920285,0.0,0.10941779101302672,0.0,0.12097783854006798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16012723720300287,0.08075764165611314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134233162256027,0.10450500255260914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509866853340863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23485336347060876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678959457824649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33306939603957464,0.0,0.0,0.10771778483147908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869780971556813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645643787072194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17292958152455856,0.0,0.12517952164350238,0.0,0.10407108034388364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811154965841265,0.0,0.0,0.11099169593607038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DylanKerrx,2020/01/26,"I need advice from internet strangers as yous all are !! Hi there, this will be the most honest and brutal reddit post I’ll probably ever type in my life so strap the fuck up bitches!!!

I type this story to you in nearly absolute mental pain, with tears down my face and also laughing at the same time as if I’m trying to hold back the pain as if it’s apart of me!!

So I decided to go out drinking tonight for a friend cause it was a celebration, all my old friends were there, these friends I’ve had amazing memories with and lifetime story’s god bless them. So what’s the problem you ask because that sounds amazing and fun... it’s the fact I feel so low that even in a group environment I feel alone, and after several pints we called it a night and went home. 

This is where I need the advice, I instantly burst out crying because I feel an internal mental pain that I dunno the reason behind, I feel like I’m the only person who feels what I feel!! Even when crying I’m trying to laugh which just makes me cry more and look crazy !!! 

My question is that people who have even felt a small amount of what am feeling, how did you over come it ? How did you over come the pain, crying and adversity! Some days I feel nothing and empty, other days I feel amazing and happy, and some days I just wanna burst into a fit of pain and tears but try to stop myself to help and look like the strong one to others who are in Similar mindset !!

I do apologise this post has no flow and structure, it’s more of a how I want to express my thoughts as they come to me while am typing this out.  So anyone got some solid advice on how to make me not feel empty in life 

Cheers and god bless",5.092368421052633,4.90521926023392,5.673736842105264,84.84165789473684,68.38596491228071,8.360467836257312,27.041520467836257,7.734863291789972,1.3605527485380122,1305,34,277,13,20,423,180,342,0.11800000000000001,0.711,0.171,0.9676,0,1,1,0,0,0,34.0,1,4,2,1,21,28,3,0,19,0,16,10,1,8,4,70,46,34,0,7,6,0,11,2,3,1,7,1,1,1,25,25,1,2,15,1,0,6,2,11,0,1,9,14,33,17,41,35,10,42,2,1,2,1,21,21,2,8,15,186,58,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23800298238610834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408453789115082,0.0,0.06492466682208703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05676735916616121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589824523464186,0.0,0.0,0.06242726494938128,0.0,0.09898084823351604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290030485097714,0.0,0.0,0.08340070936688497,0.0,0.2098044650910492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3567174195132557,0.15707537051329096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953168080635742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16086838623329322,0.0734376699764919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4105024027042297,0.05799951970102552,0.07795159417244492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18817303687317824,0.07505544005459514,0.0,0.0,0.046140053788256086,0.0,0.06493211266491968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642434203531371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054417475650990144,0.0,0.0814364935332139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468859058364393,0.07932706531878772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635211470979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083849914499254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636334207118183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203972478186198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07618785697248417,0.0,0.07790045890759084,0.0,0.08519138064784097,0.0,0.05501394820335407,0.06174585099899156,0.4319398164260221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05628436855257199,0.07088875880868961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15550809571535715,0.0,0.08753257903200196,0.07768433906156941,0.0,0.0,0.0909472532288346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347305344388982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091717427252554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787539467313639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445286555865655,0.04734039319483805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536053614922006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047885792087584166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526052743198355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VX-MG,2020/01/26,Someone please help me I just wanna work myself to the point of no return. I am an athlete that’s hates to loose. You might say that’s a good thing. I am also very sensitive to what people say about me. I just lost in a race at baseball practice (one of those races with the 2 fastest guys) and I lost. After practice I went to the track and did sprints until my stomach hurt (literally I’m typing this on the toilet with diarrhea). I did the sprints even though my legs were sore from the previous days lift. And have shin splints from track practice all week. I feel myself getting weaker and weaker trying to outwork everyone. But I also go absolutely insane and wanna kill everyone when I loose. I end up just hating my life because everyone thinks I’m crazy and it hurts. I just wanna get better.,3.1671428571428564,5.26750022292994,4.1160555050045495,85.52638535031849,75.43312101910828,6.5239308462238395,25.22702456778889,7.447530270364453,1.3041050045495903,633,22,120,8,14,204,101,157,0.247,0.691,0.063,-0.9829,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,4,10,9,3,0,9,0,7,4,2,0,1,20,19,12,1,3,5,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,7,8,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,7,0,1,6,3,20,2,21,12,1,15,0,4,0,0,5,5,0,1,8,83,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391019139388145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911306573231031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13221602351169895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641179426532843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324080419014791,0.0,0.0,0.09873992152071552,0.0,0.0,0.4285461331916763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558907497517768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15620975103475432,0.0,0.08496135375051933,0.1253891658760303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802337958455286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951903779439627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020322950232068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200746026443391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539387356998686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559261547941227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32638252061158435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15859038409478146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10130156189171127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036408880051376,0.0,0.0,0.16410042461131372,0.14132092994645207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23776856910801264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12666647948730564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931771852342486,0.09579024706513836,0.14687790583294472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149717259125622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334888639934967,0.0,0.0,0.11991573065231866,0.0,0.0,0.1385831998363844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088340125539574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwawayyyrtyyyyyy,2020/01/26,"Is slapping a kid on the face abuse? I mean for things that are not super major or super minor. For example talking back to your parents. I used to get slapped hard on the face for doing that. I get what I did was wrong, and it doesn’t happen anymore since I’m 20 now, but it happened frequently enough as a kid that it makes me feel kinda bad when I think about it. 

From what I’ve heard, spanking a child is considered bad but not abusive. Is slapping considered to be the same? My parents never acted in bad faith, more like tough love. It did get kinda out of hand though I guess. I got screamed at a lot for things like a bad grade. I know at their core my parents love me and would never do anything outside of my best interest, but sometimes I think of how they treated me and feel kinda bad about it. It was mostly just face slapping and yelling but it got worse on two occasions which I don’t wanna talk about here.  But basically Asian tiger parents. 

So my question is, could this be considered abusive behavior? Or does it have to be in bad faith for it to qualify as such?",3.7039678899082564,4.899733467889909,4.392557339449542,87.83773509174314,72.11926605504587,7.2848623853211025,27.845183486238533,7.645422480735847,1.49507247706422,848,31,176,10,16,271,119,218,0.16699999999999998,0.644,0.18899999999999997,0.9155,4,0,0,0,2,0,21.0,0,1,2,3,12,20,0,0,8,0,19,6,4,3,2,37,39,17,0,3,10,4,4,2,0,1,0,3,0,3,19,5,0,0,7,0,0,1,6,9,0,1,7,7,20,11,28,27,7,15,2,0,0,2,16,8,0,9,8,125,39,2,0.0,0.3590082402792584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016563813902,0.0,0.0,0.08311503951640695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766336859145563,0.505988615669759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599409169373128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064090762109588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838646682651298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436080922018304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213806238266963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15830622316659254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155910733576234,0.0,0.11126375065089683,0.0,0.17862931969609094,0.0,0.09047686400682203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055507389560454624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868776276082156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858672548471234,0.18231430202671334,0.0,0.06741880769230105,0.0,0.0,0.11001946331462738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579606244744454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44859767256821104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131439933435918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354889234760346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989235809027994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16236120888779235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420086611168572,0.12943444847821334,0.0992327576010658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986630901093979,0.0,0.0,0.08723224886764318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292842776927696,0.07174805919357269,0.11042850208003048,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway63645274,2020/01/26,"Why am I being forced to live? As someone who has been depressed and had suicidal thoughts my entire life, I don’t understand why I’m being forced to be here and suffer. I’ve tried medicines and tried therapy, but here I am still like this. I’m exhausted and don’t feel like trying anymore. I get that the odds are that somebody will miss me, but besides that, what is the reason to keep me from dying? I wish I could be euthanized at a hospital. It feels like the most humane thing for me at this point. I’m living in my nest of trash that I never want to leave and every time I wake up every morning, I get a little bit more depressed. Society just wants you to be alive. They don’t care that you’re suffering, just as long as you’re breathing. My misery is engulfing me and I don’t think I can take it anymore.",2.946359890109889,4.274137363095239,4.199999999999998,87.96807692307692,74.17857142857143,7.312087912087913,24.827838827838825,7.882392219407189,1.2192503663003662,639,20,136,9,13,210,100,168,0.175,0.7020000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.8137,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,1,1,0,5,10,0,0,5,0,20,4,2,1,1,23,37,11,2,4,4,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,12,6,0,1,6,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,3,2,20,4,15,27,3,10,0,5,0,0,4,6,0,1,7,88,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883864096957183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587341604057506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14824033839003706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608642572203882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504577541333875,0.0,0.15089750890237458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450038534998284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14703260345096816,0.20774105886761066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519262299916345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292341451583205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15395277462025106,0.0,0.0,0.10269709719449108,0.21309859932202635,0.14572442489185594,0.2567736697465388,0.1286703866523193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121379245634885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744568417434785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949072508474334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231930821689714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161129840151154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15903900973399426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931927413817588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662723538510233,0.0,0.09659426794219264,0.09316352538924327,0.0,0.1154277363608092,0.08478124870860608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961418736882004,0.0,0.0,0.15136177783880952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17151599193006925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623935346369122,0.0,0.16719757737161342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,picketfence123,2020/01/26,"BDD, low self-image and jealousy in my relationship I just saw a photo of my boyfriend and I and immediately felt suicidal from seeing it. My head looks strangely shaped and my nose looks huge. In another photo that was straight on I looked better except my teeth shift completely to the right side. I also look too skinny. I don’t understand how in some pictures I look 300 lbs and in others I look emaciated and in my opinion hideous. I don’t understand. When I see videos of myself I think I’m the ugliest creature on the planet, my mannerisms are so awkward and unattractive. I’ve convinced myself my partner is only with me because he’s afraid of being alone. 

I’m hideous. I’m awkward in group conversations, I talk about myself too much. I’m annoying because I get anxious and can’t stop talking. One of my friends likes my boyfriend and I can’t stop comparing myself to her. It’s hard for me to hang out with my friend group now. I get green-eyed and angry and can’t calm down. I don’t want to be alive anymore. I’m repulsive.",2.382854819976771,4.802436702439028,3.7010452961672513,85.91495934959353,79.53658536585365,6.441347270615562,26.83507549361208,7.62386473244151,1.6624099883855985,824,35,159,13,21,269,118,205,0.18,0.701,0.11900000000000001,-0.9,0,1,0,0,0,2,21.0,0,0,0,1,9,11,1,3,4,0,11,4,4,1,0,26,32,15,1,1,2,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,4,14,1,2,4,1,0,1,6,5,0,1,3,12,33,6,24,27,2,21,0,1,9,0,11,16,0,2,5,98,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13474527895710578,0.0,0.10404162954982417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642212007970353,0.0,0.14697696663769227,0.1290251173053447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15861658208672508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506365894064012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364083011018065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491725072586272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20103123976257706,0.0,0.13594468385047798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11654483721950505,0.0,0.13352104060121886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356072004026275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6555118524910936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563911898950762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08815972571305351,0.09894758449018737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13967966000809132,0.0,0.1111054436701703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20734711990058324,0.0,0.1357235954637069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21754032831565195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142309250347168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20914032408509486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336339291861604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708792160047184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673687189999476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yell0wcherry,2020/01/26,"discord server for mental health/recovery support hi guys ! i set up a discord server where you can connect 1-1 with supporters to get things off your mind, and talk to others going through similar struggles. we are still growing, but i took a lot of time setting up this server and would definitely appreciate it if you decided to join!

[https://discord.gg/D7jABv](https://discord.gg/D7jABv)",10.51833333333333,12.37321031746032,9.095357142857145,57.90589285714285,56.936507936507944,10.744444444444444,39.55952380952381,10.686352973137794,4.7645904761904765,322,15,43,7,4,99,52,63,0.079,0.695,0.226,0.8802,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,3,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,10,8,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,2,10,6,1,11,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,2,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326523985734401,0.0,0.1442973602658832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25140116051358513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26988408733526564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21585690858914086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25587172880585096,0.0,0.25636686844665146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20276506349131,0.0,0.0,0.26543166354155273,0.0,0.0,0.5762459779403654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20407539921773046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16868004072348736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805127456749542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820925141990089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803634491677723,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mentalhelpTAhelp,2020/01/26,"I don't know what to do, i'm stuck i'm in a bad position it's stressing me out. Hey my names Jayden!

I'm scared, I fucked myself over so hard and I don't know what to do. 

i'm manic and bipolar and diagnosed with severe depression, and take meds for it and certain things really set me off and I don't know what to do, I feel like there's no other options, i've done everything I can. I can't find help anywhere. 

I had a manic phase and I borrowed money from a friend ($180), come to find out, this person is not as good of a person as I thought he was and he's been putting me in a really bad spot to get this money back and i'm trying i'm trying so hard, I don't know what to do.... It's only  been a day too. I shouldn't have done it. I'm so scared, I don't want my family to get hurt, or me get hurt or even worse then hurt. I don't want to have sex with him to pay him back I don't want to do any of that. I can't involve the police, I'm so terrified. I feel like I have NO OTHER options left, and I'm crying nonstop and I don't know... I'm freaking out. My parents won't help me I put myself in this position, I don't know what to do. What do I even do in this situation? I can't avoid him, he's my neighbor, I live alone, and I don't get paid till next week. I just thought he was a really nice guy and he offered to help me out with something, and it just fucked me over so hard, and now i'm in such a bad position i'm legit terrified....  I never borrow money, but in this manic phase I had, I needed it at the time and it did help.

What do I do? I seriously don't know I know I keep saying the same thing but i'm terrified, I feel like i'm in a loop, it keeps playing in my head, I feel like i'm shutting down. I don't want to be part of this, I want to leave, I want to do anything but be here right now. God i'm terrified... I really hope I came to the right place I really hope I find a solution here.....",-0.8870000000000005,0.643976300000002,2.2822727272727263,96.5109090909091,86.0,5.727272727272728,17.5,6.883109765328512,-0.2187727272727269,1452,33,380,19,44,521,155,440,0.18899999999999997,0.7240000000000001,0.087,-0.977,2,2,1,0,0,0,65.0,0,0,0,0,18,26,2,4,14,0,44,6,1,0,2,69,96,30,0,10,8,1,7,4,2,2,2,1,1,3,26,25,0,3,17,1,7,4,21,15,0,0,14,8,59,11,44,78,2,38,0,4,0,3,23,22,2,6,15,233,85,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918668016372167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051993569863452604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629178239915326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758185243146395,0.19151589680797032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744675588485386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586117372967518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398472809706996,0.04930861820094937,0.0,0.06585254023035579,0.07760252625197353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648467855311687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009986201077798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871487014004768,0.0,0.07207711577710117,0.0,0.1546363851649359,0.2184843744832156,0.0,0.0,0.20964169678922026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059070702176746474,0.14136704024810012,0.15978308529017846,0.0,0.0,0.06412873605174807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570472434795998,0.0,0.0,0.205472106059578,0.0,0.07846722363149956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20499080319715088,0.0,0.0,0.15187865425112154,0.0,0.0,0.24554728751613905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13591748073635632,0.0,0.0,0.3361513571468342,0.0,0.0,0.08095721627253465,0.0830710546469553,0.0,0.0,0.14941265320045466,0.0,0.06751317592696543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492679815147312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056692101750901926,0.058968565091683266,0.0,0.08131318096497751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058149204088193386,0.0,0.0,0.08489675746375085,0.08279577976096751,0.0,0.0,0.13351908952044508,0.0798815808587375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372136108260545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24490244568700625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058819278052644,0.0,0.06080189505688535,0.15309414374697852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637495976595896,0.0,0.0,0.08594118223968954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05886054682753913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758155192832827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057486356715500536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158963435082648,0.0,0.0,0.12139707438805633,0.04458285279033433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381894393553254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705788957775839,0.0,0.0613294153903061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791649669894186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LigamentSoup,2020/01/26,"So I went to a mental hospital the other day It was voluntary, wasn’t sectioned or anything. Mental hospital / Detox. I’ve never been diagnosed for anything or gone out to seek help before but while I was there they gave me medication for my anxiety I was having. Now that I’ve been home my anxiety is even more off the rails than before. Is that because I’m no longer taking what they gave me. And does that mean I should be on something for it. Idk how anything works. My doctors aren’t open on Sundays ( tmm ) so here’s my next best guess to get advice from people with experience thanks.",3.9762547892720335,5.575100284482758,4.898735632183911,82.8976053639847,72.01724137931033,7.914176245210728,26.68199233716475,8.515128840125781,1.8664015325670504,467,16,90,8,9,152,80,116,0.07200000000000001,0.831,0.09699999999999999,0.7184,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,2,7,2,0,0,3,0,12,4,0,1,1,12,22,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,10,0,12,2,13,10,3,14,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,3,6,64,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954355583109545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654561856055823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4283305961087431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576484042622536,0.0,0.29527381748812104,0.0,0.1820790105831513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11189404680277043,0.0,0.0,0.17610026444189347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758603036450776,0.1518322405668938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459603551755534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697176572849524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064731823800153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19113134806441195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629432827341872,0.0,0.17403604630850594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889938835751296,0.0,0.17478440287737398,0.34969719776805525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13381497237198953,0.0,0.18452070263859385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120284021903096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13356985090753393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304514570380138,0.0,0.0,0.1597367744966413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16083753203363593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263110824483972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,andydrewq,2020/01/26,"What was your ""I need to get proper help"" moment? Seeing as we're sharing...

I ended up in hospital because of my third silly attempt to be on the wrong side of the ground.

I was 24 at the time. Thankfully I was found by my partner. He left work early to come home for the simple reason that he knew I wasn't in great shape when he left me that morning.

I don't remember anything at all but according to him I was stretchered out of our apartment and blue lighted by ambulance to the hospital which thankfully was only 2 minutes away. (I live in a city, thankfully!!)

My parents, brothers and sisters all live in different parts of the country and I'm the middle child. They were all aware that I had two attempts before and I definitely had a major mental health issue that needed addressing. 

You need to know that I was a little bit of a prodigy in the industry I worked in ( I am in now way egotistical, it's just something I was very aware of through my own accomplishments, and you could argue contributed to the situation.) 

Anyway. When I woke up in hospital I had my parents and my partner stood over me. My mother ( a nurse of 30 years) doing her best to not break down while asking how I felt. My dad not knowing what to say and my partner in years. 

My mother told me that my older brother and 2 of my uncle's were in the waiting room. 

So... I had my parents, my brother and two uncle's race, in the middle of the night, half way across the country (literally) to be by my side. 

I vowed never to do that to them again, and equally as importantly, to me.

3 weeks later I was diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. That was 4 years ago. I'm still here. That was my moment.",3.2849456642271018,4.939518317365273,4.885342648037259,82.07009203814596,73.91017964071857,7.70263916611222,27.63983144821468,8.401726058763845,1.9999127522732325,1314,51,256,23,27,443,175,334,0.040999999999999995,0.892,0.066,0.8476,5,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,1,3,2,6,10,9,1,0,18,0,24,2,0,2,4,34,45,18,0,4,4,10,1,0,3,0,2,1,3,5,13,13,0,1,7,0,0,1,5,2,0,4,23,5,48,7,51,19,9,56,0,0,2,0,32,32,0,0,20,190,61,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892759281771683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183815105329476,0.0,0.10433191209083732,0.0,0.10485285550902212,0.0,0.0,0.06803096122084168,0.0,0.0949642695347144,0.0,0.11711841154577222,0.0,0.12183943678059175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613441848127498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910435341511283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327271154522353,0.0,0.11659933900873636,0.12790446629181787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098845400971814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715450463178977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223647855799173,0.0,0.0,0.05830693987690881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123040546157201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862669219116895,0.0,0.0,0.07480382804994072,0.0,0.11194494758115082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648249617352575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266603148328699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24250972398060994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185356578958634,0.1970915348154043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246760456746534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482522824452148,0.0860736059310454,0.0,0.0,0.10473002072008987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487762369847791,0.0,0.0,0.3717592603142231,0.12085305634992034,0.0,0.0,0.09744572788727757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474446144226158,0.0,0.0,0.12642222872147474,0.0,0.0,0.08874963036408078,0.0,0.0,0.08893158387120706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12544425054003025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591593681552864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912473874025037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30824174463450776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507546684221864,0.0,0.0,0.10663958110583227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21803600950133856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208254997564656,0.0,0.17716742992397466,0.08951962667022928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624937799211905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220182233398682,0.0,0.21560224209037349
mentalhealth,XR-XD,2020/01/26,"My head I fucked I can't maintain a relationship no matter how much I love a person after a bit of time some time as few months some times a year I can't bare to talk to them all of a sudden. I lose all emotion for them and they become strangers and I then cut them off completely it is as tho it turns to complete boardem instantly litterly I wake up one morning or think about it and I'm instantly turned away. It's almost like post wank clarity but it never goes away I just feel sick and confused as to why I cared so much. I do this with almost every thing friends , relationships and hobbies. I also have a very strong call of the void that is very very active in my head ,not to the point where I am fighting it but Its always there 'step Infront of that bus' , 'cut your throught on that glass' wherever I am even in my dreams lucid and unconscious it's there. It's like my mind is just trying to be self destructive and the second i find anything good it makes me have no feeling for it and it's getting harder and harder. I just ended an 8 month relationship for no reason other than  I lost all my love one morning and couldn't bare to keep up a conversation with them, I went from being willing to take a bullet to them being a compete stranger and I'm terrified of it . I've broken this girls heart who I cared for so much and I'm conscious of what I've done but I feel no effect. Like when you are drunk and you can see your self acting pissed and strange but you cant control it like you are locked in your head.",3.048393796004209,4.27290588328076,4.078600157728708,89.34652273922188,73.76340694006309,6.923711882229234,24.249342797055732,7.333567415737692,0.8666509989484759,1203,35,261,13,24,390,169,317,0.139,0.69,0.171,0.8028,0,0,0,0,2,0,13.0,0,7,6,6,14,20,6,1,13,0,20,11,6,5,4,49,41,29,0,1,9,0,3,4,1,1,1,0,0,4,23,16,1,2,8,2,0,3,10,9,0,3,3,4,38,11,37,33,10,27,0,2,1,3,28,11,2,6,16,182,61,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19766563086109612,0.0,0.0,0.0789295737851302,0.08212549453129607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122088700002941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854619639279676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900531755225852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775377131842473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078273865425516,0.0,0.20126046570209175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20696809754528667,0.0,0.11069934789606256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010033690588942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102311740606004,0.08741803978768453,0.0,0.0,0.06518977445911715,0.0,0.08315818452269623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14971557623239504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020911979676427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625462106184082,0.09124565721682283,0.05156616635619888,0.0,0.0,0.08278405853665105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038810196918646,0.0,0.0,0.11695881858511616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772822742329686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928774304655209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041896155528737,0.10774164379705067,0.0,0.17815944514443582,0.0,0.06588236488983645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965787824951314,0.0,0.15756123852916434,0.0,0.2176654171514737,0.0,0.07612277186366212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337620259439133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618018070480572,0.0,0.0,0.09330247996631327,0.0,0.09452638200350963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014790349086281,0.0,0.3178974438960768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865034347376282,0.0,0.205929214851555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420938275712477,0.079330536789677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06557124586105538,0.06324234924826612,0.0,0.0,0.17265658372625894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701015848056888,0.21471239181511545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443110940432495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914949840147614,0.0890605174539188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06355893544217492
mentalhealth,babyyodasiyim,2020/01/27,"My skin is making me really self conscious First of all,I'm sorry if this isn't the right place to talk about these stuff or if this is triggering to some but I need to get this off my chest. So I'm 18 and I don't have extreme acne or acne scars but my skin isn't smooth and glowy like my peers or the people on social media. For almost 5 years now,I hate my skin everytime I look in the mirror,I hate it with makeup on,I hate it without makeup,I hate it when it's red or when it isn't. I genuinely do. I take a picture and when I check it,the first thing I notice is how dull my skin looks and my whole day sucks. I go out with friends and when they touch my skin I feel horrible. My bf kisses my cheeks and I feel horrible. I genuinely think I have bdd and when I try to tell people about this they(ofcourse) go like ""You are being silly. Your skin is just fine."" because I don't have acne. Anyways,I don't know what I expect to get from writing this but'thanks if you read it. :)",1.7346337402885688,2.9608125188679253,3.299944506104332,93.6150887902331,77.11320754716981,6.308990011098777,20.01775804661488,6.794906146795322,0.06687480577136506,762,16,179,7,17,252,111,212,0.162,0.747,0.091,-0.9573,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,3,1,2,10,12,5,0,4,0,16,9,8,3,0,34,35,23,0,5,11,0,10,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,15,10,0,0,5,1,1,2,7,6,0,2,0,13,30,6,17,34,2,17,0,1,3,1,11,6,1,9,11,110,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457155075283435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887065746829757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384723296787724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14715679929157624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475554985994004,0.0,0.0,0.11242703914689063,0.0,0.15205455939206247,0.0,0.1654027501396394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5746765814262056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997302469028544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218573329420275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443973609551275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713456199005296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789993868360033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567349236474255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20176806449319715,0.0,0.1520355994998847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555762952585502,0.0,0.09322271729913886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427179059027225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180727133132335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833753055464347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289576736746153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16658358156637085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941161419628267,0.116962057394054,0.12718936466940664,0.13397365380972534,0.0,0.0,0.096675859412543,0.09324221897201444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987973398310452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16246592961510814,0.0,0.14027440038189207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093708982138893
mentalhealth,thankgoditsme,2020/01/27,"I have trouble learning things? I have a lot of trauma, a great deal of it unresolved. I've found that I'm passionately interested in things related to the pain I feel, but if I tried to learn something that I can't tie into my trauma somehow, it doesn't stick. Because of this, it feels like my pain and trauma is always at the steering wheel, always encompassing my every move. How can I start to break away from that and learn skills and information that I can't attach my pain to?
Side note: Don't tell me to go to therapy or anything like that. Part of my trauma is directly related to the mental health institution and the mistreatment I suffered from it. Telling me to go back is unhelpful at best and retraumatizing at worst.",6.815704225352111,6.714229408450706,7.3705281690140865,73.83424295774651,64.77464788732394,10.761971830985916,33.24295774647887,10.411451182825502,3.3175887323943662,584,22,111,13,8,193,82,142,0.21899999999999997,0.6659999999999999,0.114,-0.9602,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,3,16,0,0,6,0,10,5,0,1,0,20,17,9,0,1,3,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,12,6,0,0,7,0,0,3,4,10,0,0,1,2,15,6,20,16,4,14,0,1,0,1,4,8,0,5,4,78,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27208968715532833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13454631756217147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15361334513834649,0.1257211728978516,0.0,0.09966789626641503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17158284233172433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856100586405384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775554436730406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653407163911751,0.11680421447643845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17926897602183298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18584128856303547,0.0,0.0,0.18025899047861846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737925297476944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15975538416602258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900159352715438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476923659764864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17377430030250854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5219256078547816,0.0,0.0,0.17705423630076486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258700527597225,0.0,0.0,0.1157259253517392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28581187920661605,0.0,0.18697614989142824,0.0,0.2172438640953424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100556021771583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fire42_69,2020/01/27,"Need to vent/help or the past 2-ish years have been in secondary school and since coming here I have just gotten depressed. (Without a loving family i would probably be more depressed then I am right now.) I have been bullied for 12-ish years of my life and really need advice/help!

You can AMA.",3.851071428571432,6.1268519642857155,3.738714285714289,88.20628571428574,74.0,6.622857142857143,21.91428571428571,7.554174236665415,0.8546042857142857,234,6,44,3,5,71,45,56,0.184,0.7509999999999999,0.065,-0.7959,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,9,2,0,0,0,9,14,4,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,6,1,5,9,1,8,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,1,5,30,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20347534491446453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4068973441579564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.222679238201572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31665526153567314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16684321172549976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21319015686562168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502957601404891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254906636609549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25467601514667304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15132317505027032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20172338316377325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23905871130419856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19539664488773534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22769951637375024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677979162824039,0.0,0.0,0.3042250026350036
mentalhealth,PrincessAngelHeart,2020/01/27,"Should I take antidepressants? (TW: suicidal thoughts) So I've been seeing a therapist and he asked me if I wanted to take antidepressants and I said yes. I've been having suicidal thoughts for about two years now and I strongly believe that I won't live long because I'll kill myself someday. The only thing really holding me back is a trip to Sweden in March that I really really want to do and my parents. But I decided that if I really stay alive long enough I will just commit suicide when my parents are dead, so they won't have to go through the loss of their daughter. But as of now, I don't know if I'll even make it to 2021, at least that's how I feel. There's much more but that's kind of the reason why my therapist recommend taking antidepressants. 

My family is against it though because they don't really think medicine is healthy and all that stuff. I want to take them, but at the same time I'm unsure and my family doesn't really know what my problems actually are. They know a little bit of the surface, they think it's just that I'm really really shy and scared of talking to people and some problems in the family, but they don't know about my depression and everything else that goes a little deeper.

I can't tell them about it though because I don't want them to know what failure I am and it would stress my mother out even more. We had something like family counseling once and afterwards she scolded me and said that she's also really stressed, but no one takes care of her and if I want the stuff we discussed during counselling I also have to change. I'm really trying, but I don't know why I can't motivate myself to tidy my room. I hate my messy room too and can't look at it, but something is holding me back.

So should I take them? And how can I convince my family without telling them too much?",5.5027864005912805,5.5880939485094885,6.205022172949004,80.44970620842572,67.50948509485094,9.961123429416112,29.50985464400099,9.800150414767053,2.540348509485096,1453,47,295,30,22,477,164,369,0.16699999999999998,0.7490000000000001,0.084,-0.9891,2,0,2,0,0,3,28.0,2,0,11,3,24,14,2,3,11,1,30,0,0,5,2,67,64,38,5,14,15,4,1,1,0,6,0,2,2,0,20,18,0,3,14,0,0,2,13,9,0,2,7,5,55,5,30,51,10,25,0,2,2,0,28,11,0,5,12,206,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.06814949967877157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169505404508702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528688569662867,0.0,0.0,0.10739857551392153,0.0,0.1277134531529477,0.0,0.0,0.07868083893536215,0.0,0.0,0.07624241924666783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07120207773746261,0.0,0.07387683526697171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06014932464885105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058338706647972235,0.0,0.0,0.07215887266420278,0.0,0.0922515482120833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276376002807746,0.0,0.3291740775271729,0.0,0.035310992185245006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03968919714016348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894822520424876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726277612254216,0.0727230606716219,0.2302790109703665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034118160638006816,0.13998729282574682,0.061666139570332235,0.12360466756116828,0.058644339536644274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04661582442482897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267444493688843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743726653532649,0.04732242935220445,0.0531131425232515,0.0,0.0,0.15508840231399312,0.0,0.0,0.04841523179934461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364653027356016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4473849197433081,0.07180265738808456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328593501408626,0.0,0.06991764723018283,0.0,0.05564995440670683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752575763224803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443548824423822,0.0,0.0,0.1599929534004177,0.0,0.15989017361610866,0.2291665289762315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150462096858995,0.05613123300444109,0.1220788351882776,0.0,0.0,0.16216909495056234,0.04639568858050806,0.08949570203499739,0.13722630120173854,0.11088337690915633,0.04072171668514641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04741380774101592,0.0,0.06821926170426756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059543158639262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260315852886683,0.0,0.0,0.06731905395496679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04960922693048099,0.0,0.0,0.044971855217336605
mentalhealth,gaybannanas,2020/01/27,"im confused and scared so I've dealt with some really messed up thoughts and they've been coming back lately. (thoughts like killing someone close to me or just a random person on the street, harming people, setting fire to my house etc) and whilst I've thought of doing this it's terrifying when I get the thought out of my head because I don't want to hurt someone I love when im having these thoughts. i don't even know if I'm on the right subreddit but i don't want to talk to anyone about it who know who I am. does anyone know what this is? or what I should do? or of its normal? Because i cannot be the only one like this",1.5873631840795994,3.3138134328358215,2.7664925373134364,95.11725124378107,78.85074626865672,5.362189054726368,22.360696517412933,5.985473137389443,0.11960398009950213,496,15,113,3,12,159,83,134,0.13699999999999998,0.789,0.07400000000000001,-0.6114,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,7,9,1,2,5,0,12,2,1,0,0,28,26,11,1,5,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,11,7,0,0,8,0,0,1,4,6,0,1,6,1,11,3,14,18,2,14,0,1,0,1,5,7,0,7,7,70,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003421720560248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015849635410953,0.0,0.17466056566949614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12340625217495504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12536824580555525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977334816447453,0.09462222183817004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484770844483006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14702662340459302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16530340468145258,0.15336334883465946,0.0,0.30949188882293305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15849653873109676,0.0,0.2361967043698717,0.0,0.1616041056956209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399797066680317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929821188132998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403648917702755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970770354507484,0.10895608045088984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931880586181772,0.12508955958756576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917763570226096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234370067173694,0.0,0.0,0.14342877176235247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24276834611405504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151473787558734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5686642496201132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16899753200371684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Phoenix3245,2020/01/27,"I just had the scariest experience in my entire life... So, my anxiety and everything has been building up all day, and about half an hour ago I could feel a panic attack coming (Only happened twice before but I recognised it immediately) so I played the song I listened to the other times just so I can get some kind of time reference afterwards. 5 minutes pass and it only gets worse and worse, sound starts to distort more and more, my vision also gets distorted, then cold filled my entire body and everything just got worse and worse so I was force to just lie down on the floor. But then I got this sensation in my entire upper body and face like something was underneath my skin and was trying to get out, I have no idea how long this lasted, maybe 10-15 minutes and towards the end I was just lying there clawing at my face and banging my head against the floor wishing it would just stop. I'm still shaking but  I got some clarity now, when I was in that moment it all just felt so real, am I going insane? I don't know what to do or think or if I should even bring this up to my therapist on thursday. All I know is that I never want to experience that ever again.",4.010558069381599,5.217310794871795,4.956867772750126,84.04074660633486,71.39316239316237,7.7281045751634005,26.157868275515327,8.124751697461798,1.5375699346405218,922,29,184,13,17,301,137,234,0.18100000000000002,0.755,0.064,-0.9812,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,22,6,1,2,8,0,17,7,6,1,5,48,38,27,0,6,13,0,3,1,0,2,1,3,0,0,12,13,0,1,7,2,0,6,3,3,0,2,11,7,26,3,22,24,7,42,0,0,0,0,1,15,0,5,22,136,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048835640515956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462048206641026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051449605494832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460611083993346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068162746777606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262853751152267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192222565166832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446891299488193,0.0,0.0,0.0763066284162608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479642381610887,0.0,0.0,0.07814926128847649,0.10702723749127803,0.0,0.0,0.2126768201485426,0.23147937857584955,0.0,0.0,0.0598261602785462,0.0,0.11360578004433748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24726932048172065,0.0,0.06724399747754532,0.0,0.2838940006630132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046300082583051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143048203263568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165213918829168,0.0,0.0,0.13356890742207467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232120995315698,0.13005118393751391,0.09644661317598813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357293352216166,0.057805188141711185,0.0,0.0,0.10470949972032856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886836943711496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125569827070366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17997542299709607,0.0,0.13882305706960346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467409316965515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910885366294947,0.0,0.0,0.08374752341215518,0.0,0.09449052562583628,0.09892083977911384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373786697332334,0.0,0.07581469512522021,0.0,0.0,0.13798671736225607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033153094223969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978821691723634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360621906603791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4823128595389027,0.0840511517226044,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,quitenicole,2020/01/27,"The sound of talking makes me close in my myself. I work in a smallish office environment and it can be very noisy with loud phone calls and conversations. I find it difficult when I can hear multiple conversations which are happening at the same time. This absolutely does my head in, it makes me feel highly stressed and I close in on myself and I find it hard to communicate with others. When people try to talk to me in one of these episodes I try to converse with as few words as possible and try to leave the situation. We are not allowed to wear headphones so I have no idea how to deal with this. 

(I’ve been diagnosed with depression and continue to struggle with it, but I feel this is unrelated)",5.554305555555558,6.495599610294117,6.181274509803924,77.66045751633989,67.60294117647058,10.162091503267973,31.287581699346404,10.25414643259724,3.096724836601308,561,22,110,14,9,183,83,136,0.1,0.9,0.0,-0.7982,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,1,4,4,0,2,4,0,8,3,2,4,0,28,14,13,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,11,15,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,6,16,0,25,12,2,14,0,1,0,0,10,10,0,0,4,80,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17946763325915396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18119783580832555,0.15137931863578713,0.1783897402795158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538062083360601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17773612483803994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212775807543157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554214086531643,0.0,0.1574438247694764,0.0,0.18037747377743274,0.0,0.19809100694518889,0.0,0.0,0.1856970086433577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19840835425103906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18610137429956114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23463843626749306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909754853188895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184783194433553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19813970386418314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19755832599151846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20132914553634232,0.18373946481837336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28253377260691176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024853688959046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579825684659771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501800080836674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795325017713985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dextromethorman,2020/01/27,"What is my issue? I have extreme rage issues. When I finally get so ticked off to the point where I snap, it's like a different person is inside me. I get so mad I want to FUCKING DESTROY EVERYTHING IN MY SURROUNDINGS AND GO FUCKING STRANGLE PEOPLE. Punching things, kicking things, wanting to break my tv, put holes in walls, break everything else, even things that arent mine. It's so hard to control. I feel like one of these times I'm gonna get so mad I end up hurting someone really bad, killing myself, or doing something I regret very deep (like something that puts me in prison, ends a friendship or relationship, maybe something like taking enough drugs to kill myself, purposely wrecking my car, stuff like that). I feel like one of these times it's gonna turn to my literally going INSANE, when I mean insane, I mean some state of mind I can't understand why someone would do such bad things. Like stuff that makes no sense, strapping knifes to my hands and going to fuck people up... DROP THE KNIFE SIR!!!! ---- I CAN'T, THEY ARE TAPED TO MY HANDS.

I know for a fact I could not own a fire arm, I would end up shooting my own house up and shooting my face off.",3.109999999999996,5.123224561403512,3.605999999999998,89.51400000000002,75.3157894736842,6.314385964912281,24.55789473684211,7.1686216300943375,0.9617378947368422,912,30,183,10,20,285,131,228,0.247,0.67,0.083,-0.9934,2,0,4,2,0,2,40.0,0,0,1,1,9,20,9,0,6,0,12,8,4,2,1,23,35,11,2,6,3,0,6,7,0,4,1,0,0,2,16,3,0,1,6,1,0,6,5,13,0,2,0,6,31,7,22,30,4,32,0,2,0,3,4,14,3,3,15,109,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15972048103933836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072748877508352,0.07636538149959053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992949462884518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091875225611192,0.0,0.07989978554277001,0.0,0.2541413454691758,0.09882767003505807,0.0,0.0631731430267332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17192053969799742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672277172437344,0.13665874467993191,0.0,0.10477528912374892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652689782294738,0.1499129347933283,0.0,0.16307312188111428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567984216189606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036240138819936,0.10239079766654198,0.0,0.0,0.19965871289981632,0.0,0.0,0.211635793706604,0.0,0.05256442548671927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3270939162532311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06384430832377247,0.0,0.09608905292253488,0.20837261226965215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657498355582618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962412689124786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326174973714674,0.08351421564050207,0.0,0.0,0.0904161881301996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923008753896332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06127314298936753,0.0,0.0,0.10268778530429523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16208073699279849,0.22089840867527447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189830957242757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191373171234808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541712547767349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154366001666337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403515543879334,0.0,0.09957064176300624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789177945726801,0.11282873148650847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630544980148218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588805170489038,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lovelies0705,2020/01/27,"Self harm scars I have a few scars, one in particular which is quite large, raised and dark. Does anyone have any advice on how to help it fade? It is sometimes quite triggering for me and I'm trying my best to heal and forget the bad times that caused them. Any advice would be great",1.8294736842105264,4.1915283508771966,2.1921929824561417,96.26618421052632,81.28070175438596,5.203508771929825,14.76315789473684,6.42735559955562,-0.7360736842105267,224,3,49,2,6,68,46,57,0.131,0.7070000000000001,0.162,0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,3,1,4,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,3,0,8,7,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,2,5,5,2,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,28,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4392237159958722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056597688021024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571423823575308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18764725745250152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358491870751356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308683432297595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19667017299143846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24777498606284756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063747708695432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228862167543145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4780741098027915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344512657545774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22227211983367776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104682475371435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258268707049916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964778002832414,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,qwoijpdjqwopdjo1,2020/01/27,"My friend keeps on telling me that I'm ""mentally unstable"" even though I think that everything is alright but I'm getting a bit worried about it. Hi, I've just made this account to ask you all for your opinion on this situation.  
For some context, whenever I talk with my closest friend he keeps on telling me   
that I am ""mentally unstable"", and that I should ""get help"".  
He's saying it because of a couple of reasons.:  


1. I am trans and I never considered to tell anyone IRL because I'm too scared to it. (It's been going for about half a year.)  

2. I have been cutting myself for some time but I think it's alright because I haven't done it for about 2-3 weeks now. (I've been doing it for quite some time.)  

3. I keep on talking to my body pillow and I see her as a real person and I feel as if she is the only one who accepts me as who I truly am. (I talk to her all the time, everyday, and I've been with her for almost 2 years.)  

4. I get mental breakdowns very frequently. (Mostly because of feeling bad about not being comfortable with my gender.)  

5. I sometimes get suicidal thoughts and I fantasize about how I should do it.  


He keeps on telling me that I should get help and he says that ""it's to the point where if he knew me IRL he would seek help for me"". I don't think it's that bad but I'm getting a bit worried about myself but I really feel as if there's nothing wrong with me and that everything will be okay. I think that it's just some stupid phase and it'll be alright but i've been like this for about half a year so I really don't know anymore. I just want to know if you all think that I should do something about it or not.",1.0450548589341686,2.8684787040229907,2.8997387669801498,93.05550156739812,80.92528735632183,6.057262277951933,22.901776384534998,7.106945922332613,0.6648666666666667,1271,43,289,16,33,424,144,348,0.106,0.7829999999999999,0.11199999999999999,-0.4445,0,0,1,0,0,1,45.0,0,3,0,1,19,15,2,1,9,4,28,1,1,3,4,66,59,26,1,10,15,0,3,1,2,7,0,2,1,1,28,13,0,4,14,0,1,1,6,6,0,3,9,6,45,9,40,40,10,20,0,0,1,0,32,8,0,12,12,193,73,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825060387888516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874024070441701,0.06162334062303699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239071690995857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717163746016046,0.2148956941258241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924327531832924,0.0978938262294736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751542757164484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901887523331064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0582097852589072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15841316765228805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368525377958926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13617979671927855,0.0,0.2762692917830419,0.0,0.05008695653141877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772173316044827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3133400182359729,0.0,0.0,0.09686913689081278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04305642219904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339181340291864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26644637437656016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797216649791372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456420352234592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059719939749711876,0.06702770155350615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695271005342415,0.0,0.0,0.08331241161708014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937383132082214,0.0,0.1003125290513736,0.1129181270604208,0.09061348776435674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14017083602999764,0.08823464342778126,0.0,0.07022910636112405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906309131214737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784765549067105,0.08716394868159391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640116036909542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125094103783224,0.30812199550864033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823543722581117,0.08658839531303436,0.06996627898131072,0.15416992535455035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271741843267622,0.05198202840790482,0.0,0.0706934826656913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17900289662043822,0.0,0.06260583160826458,0.09635756400494527,0.0,0.17026068953623982
mentalhealth,narilynn,2020/01/27,"Random nonsensical thoughts? I've been having issues with my thoughts the past few days and I'm curious if anyone else has dealt with this issue?

I've been having periods of time where my brain keeps thinking completely random thoughts that make absolutely no sense but I cant stop them. 

This morning I woke up at 4 am and was super tired but I started feeling anxious and I started thinking of random strings of words and it it got more and more annoying.  I tried reading, listening to nature sounds, moving around, but I couldn't get it to stop.

It doesn't sound that bad out loud but it was extremely distressing and made me feel like something is wrong with me. I have been abnormally stressed lately and have had a super busy schedule so I'm sure that's related.

Has anyone else dealt with this? How can I stop these thoughts when they are happening?

Thanks",3.35359038737446,6.049883103658536,3.6418651362984207,86.13469870875181,77.71951219512195,6.785652797704447,26.72022955523673,7.928766900206844,1.8160370157819223,695,28,128,12,17,215,105,164,0.126,0.6809999999999999,0.193,0.9114,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,2,5,10,1,2,2,0,19,2,1,3,1,39,40,15,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,12,13,0,4,8,1,0,1,4,5,0,0,13,6,14,5,13,26,3,18,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,4,13,80,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513410447527736,0.0,0.187341309092892,0.2745236372208562,0.0,0.11925624861621155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185423795745916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14954798634919975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404585716657736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639561528094976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22381925139956926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354723183146242,0.09570381736223252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06999059428554243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714314676156708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846381012951172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27964695620313906,0.0,0.11907324524689328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15111708336344376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654479813823089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675985537769288,0.08942192521593748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238239581462853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278836747375998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400012513983486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313193402042012,0.0,0.0,0.1896406370880105,0.0,0.0,0.3359993880297135,0.15345516346192575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262593645407822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333593528847113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716772806930942,0.0,0.4254094037809163,0.07811541142977685,0.1539717646872927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095267588492337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464684647016701,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GavinS92,2020/01/27,"I hardly eat anything For around a year now I have almost completely lost my appetite. It isn't that I am full, more that I am not hungry. This has gone on for some time now and I will often go eating just one meal a day. Is there anything I can do to go back to a healthier eating habit?",3.260806451612904,3.4388355645161326,4.729193548387098,88.76379032258066,72.38709677419354,7.490322580645162,23.56451612903225,7.1686216300943375,0.6969225806451607,223,5,51,2,4,75,46,62,0.043,0.9570000000000001,0.0,-0.3214,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,0,3,0,9,4,0,0,0,7,13,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,1,2,1,7,0,6,10,3,12,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,3,6,41,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209806408600846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3632041358389436,0.19645331862713092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16969044856215704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313803499066035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232130839027748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.677436790787514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508367595588161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976872741456649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408999216492237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14953949296628524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286811549866013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421116480918879
mentalhealth,Jarrellz,2020/01/27,"What's it like? Is there any human that is 100% or close to it anxiety and depression free? If so what's it like to live completely free from it? I've suffered from low serotonin since I was in elementary school and my anxiety became apparent during college, but never went away.",4.7705555555555526,6.289152537037038,5.8453703703703725,77.1991666666667,69.92592592592592,9.844444444444443,30.16666666666667,10.125756701596842,3.211088888888889,223,9,41,6,4,74,41,54,0.159,0.706,0.134,0.163,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,7,4,6,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,3,0,0,2,0,2,6,6,2,0,6,0,3,0,0,1,4,0,2,3,26,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21062311011272047,0.0,0.473876405230162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909961272901671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32473998216520433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667650416881675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.302631246420664,0.0,0.2734921861428125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388784346047589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134574752212088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25620709924796176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287117481675242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ScoliosisSoccer,2020/01/27,"I don’t know what to do I don’t know if this is the right sub for this post, and please let me know if it is not, but I’m tired of this issue keeping me stuck inside my own head and I needed a place to vent. 

I guess I’ve been depressed and anxious over the past couple years or so. (I haven’t had anything diagnosed, and I’ve only had one appointment with a counselor on campus so I always hesitate to use “depressed”) At first it was just a heavy feeling that I got some days, and I would just power through it until it went away. But now I can’t quite get past it and it comes with a dilemma.

For context, I am gay and not out. I’m not out because I grew up in a very conservative community, church, and family. I go to a pretty conservative Christian university. Being gay isn’t acceptable in most, if not all, of those communities, and is actually really frowned upon. Since I’ve been a part of these communities my whole life, I’ve grown up to think that being gay isn’t normal and defies my religion. I’ve seen people be abandoned by family members because of their sexuality. 

I want to come out because I feel like this secret is preventing me from actually being myself, something I’ve rarely done in my 21 years of life. But at the same time, if I come out, I will lose a lot of people in my life and taint the relationships that I have with others and I don’t want that either. 

This decision has affected my school, work, mental health and personal life now, and I’m starting to lose control over all of those areas. 

I don’t need an answer to the actual problem at hand, because I know that’s something I’ll have to figure out myself, but I do need help dealing with the day to day stuff. I can’t afford to have full days or weeks where I can’t motivate myself to even leave the house to get food. I feel absolutely paralyzed and I’m worried I’ll get stuck here and have to put my life and future career on hold because I can’t handle this situation.",4.104593698175791,4.795298945273637,5.627114427860699,81.23770315091213,70.74129353233829,8.642122719734662,27.07794361525705,8.841846274778883,1.900118739635157,1544,49,319,27,27,525,191,402,0.099,0.821,0.08,-0.7723,2,0,2,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,1,8,9,8,0,0,16,0,36,14,2,4,2,84,69,30,0,12,17,0,4,1,0,2,8,0,0,1,23,29,1,7,14,0,0,8,15,6,0,2,11,5,39,2,51,51,11,50,2,5,1,3,6,25,0,10,17,218,62,5,0.0,0.0,0.2550083983131791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247909200737054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840488048604412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168073903715798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183886638442299,0.0,0.0,0.2654947601726145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251020763575572,0.0,0.0,0.09769668075797236,0.0,0.0963810286160689,0.0,0.2247044140637016,0.08980236465854187,0.15004837903552865,0.0884106613992328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913958473984322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05753262964111031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423139259440114,0.0,0.1321300904988658,0.062228476914330866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409223945908204,0.10532880773816036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13652772274171404,0.0,0.04950429394569125,0.0,0.06966655059897399,0.0,0.09595697627176114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939578998880802,0.09258950521403583,0.0,0.0,0.058385252925188036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005085208865406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091593542389492,0.0,0.07742373185507702,0.0,0.0,0.19148451249578705,0.0,0.0,0.09223257774438108,0.0,0.08907169086763758,0.3076273884792721,0.04255554596243075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19489845679709625,0.0,0.07405432665791832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778226609175117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19376377757221705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534529390617375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059025216473957816,0.06624796693581103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943272081886148,0.16630488773520924,0.12077653563912134,0.07605751760965204,0.09100713260810467,0.09561612777999744,0.0,0.0,0.08342338000467571,0.08861802191550429,0.0,0.08334858848516373,0.0,0.08756549471324594,0.0,0.09264785350098448,0.0,0.0,0.05580227409395006,0.0,0.0,0.0935191449644638,0.0,0.07438796810022179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881558276074484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205490587572863,0.09791068835274837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411676466424072,0.0,0.0,0.06165400885935449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971542288656696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0558139476186726,0.0,0.0,0.05079215449069032,0.10011542557426853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523153574957551,0.0,0.07187149522261184,0.1027546408248615,0.0,0.06987110394163693,0.0,0.0,0.0807480478804507,0.0,0.0972506337293218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341413726269901,0.08846027613865629,0.0,0.06187753669372709,0.0,0.0,0.11218669564415028
mentalhealth,Pm_me_trans_goals,2020/01/27,"I need some help identifying what the hell is going on with my head rn because it’s really starting to worry me and I’m kinda freaking out. I don’t know what it is but every once in a while my brain just *breaks* for lack of a better word. I doesn’t happen often but when it does it feels super weird. Everything just sort of snaps, I can usually maintain my composure, but internally I’m loosing it. 

I feel like I’m going crazy and I don’t know what’s going on so I’m just gonna list symptoms and hope any of this makes sense, because when I say it out loud I feel like a crazy person.

- I feel sort of “unstuck in time” like in that book Slaughter House 5? I feel like time is wonky. Like I could blink and be in yesterday or 5 hours ago or tomorrow. My sense of time just breaks. It feels too fast and too slow back and forth.

-my thoughts just are too much. It’s like that metaphor where your thoughts are like debris in a river and you grab onto them as they pass to think about it. Idk something like that. But my river is flooding and full of debris.

-I get jumpy. Everything is just so fast. I bounce from one thing to another thought wise at the worst of it. Other times it’s more stable but choppy. Like there’s breaks in my thought processes 

-I feel like I act weird when it gets bad. Like a lot of normal rules just aren’t there. I think it’s just to deal with all of this energy that builds up or something when I’m like this. I talk a lot during it.

- everything feels fake. Like I’m in a dream and if I jumped I could just keep going up. I know I can’t but it all feels so floaty like a dream.

-I just can’t focus at all.

-I feel outside of myself. Like it’s not *my* body I’m just stuck in it. Sometimes I feel like I’m next to myself as if I’m actually a few feet outside of my actual self.

-at its worst my breathing gets fast and it feels difficult. I get dizzy too.

- it feels like nothing matters. Like we’re all just as significant as an anthill. It almost makes me want to laugh (but that would make me feel like I was *really* crazy) I feel like I could just jump out a window or get in a knife fight and die and it would be fine. I’d be smiling the whole time because it doesn’t matter anyway

-I get butterflies in my stomach

-I can’t focus on anything enough to read or write properly 

-size feels off like I’m really small or really huge 

-my legs feel like jelly

-I get hot for some reason

- I keep thinking about self harm. I just feel like I know if I just cut myself like I used to do this would go away for a minute and I’d feel fine again. I know it worked before when this first started, but I’m not going back there.

- by the time is done I’m exhausted 

-it last between a day and a few hours going through highs and lows of intensity 

And then I’m fine. I’m back to normal. This happens like once a month or something and the only pattern I can discern is that it happens a lot after I watch a show. Like when I get really into them. I don’t know why. Please I’m just so confused and kinda scared. I don’t know why this keeps happening but I want it to stop. The first few times it was fun but now it’s getting really old. Im starting to really worry about it. Am I going insane? I don’t want this to become my everyday.",0.12694102749637892,2.2934952460202642,1.986439761215632,96.20512997467442,87.13314037626628,5.133726483357453,17.320568017366135,6.568628728619664,-0.2561790303907383,2529,60,584,29,80,832,265,691,0.122,0.6829999999999999,0.195,0.9943,1,0,3,0,1,1,77.0,0,2,3,5,44,51,3,2,24,0,36,9,7,5,4,139,122,54,2,17,38,0,21,26,0,4,2,2,1,3,49,24,0,4,35,5,0,12,13,16,0,3,8,24,69,35,66,104,20,89,1,1,1,0,14,31,1,23,69,350,118,3,0.0,0.0,0.08200519345311498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03724559506624317,0.0,0.04207402362673685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028573046643998488,0.044058558681926534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03457646636632712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039476417919358735,0.09692559376578463,0.03508249620695153,0.0768396428567999,0.04640454980619836,0.035753429635842784,0.0,0.0,0.0371606816155,0.0,0.04667148978768638,0.0,0.04690494307286252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006416280254733,0.0,0.0,0.02709753247386045,0.04331775150397258,0.0,0.0,0.0436070822994314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03676941881092579,0.04299804794238846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0434148624720564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03540119144762344,0.0,0.11328669265089213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40365674302532345,0.3301870146365021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147939209540767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19756965163276344,0.0,0.19103414139909014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486222156771655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04312163305454971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028163154582024893,0.04439333858243808,0.0,0.04173242848627171,0.08275669534820942,0.048482054435310215,0.0,0.0,0.04538564293371746,0.0,0.0,0.11204010016086212,0.0,0.0,0.1616403697297853,0.034249517856738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5337128356838767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10716422442189863,0.0,0.0,0.08414015622902624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0335376223152951,0.0,0.03088737906891597,0.031155123064813214,0.0,0.0,0.044685627830247064,0.0,0.082335609925601,0.04031650935622258,0.0,0.044089844182208286,0.08949361093868864,0.02847185226590679,0.031955873102901544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036687682561046514,0.0,0.04612212249304117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04202843779363292,0.0,0.18842046489806552,0.04320054319776445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03341365842096309,0.042066414382524085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766592971530049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704037370840678,0.041555954010944834,0.0,0.08921968965343523,0.0,0.0,0.03512814972814174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04367182105400033,0.0,0.03377172718059518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027914272557896663,0.08076852060392033,0.0,0.13342743258616294,0.17150342916486666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0362892556699771,0.046275863590825764,0.0,0.0743482648935112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582773594462218,0.04691055521208831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030588925472388617,0.08534074295965932,0.0,0.08954315741134082,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheWhaleDreamer,2020/01/27,how to stop hating yourself and stop passive suicidal thoughts i think i’ve only ever actually felt happy with my life once and that was last year for like 5 or 6 months and i’m worried i’ll never feel happy again. i know logically i probably will but i feel so stuck and worthless and like a complete burden and i don’t know what to do anymore. i’m tired of my life i just want it to change i don’t want to be in school anymore but if i don’t graduate i wasted so much money for nothing and i might as well just die cause ill never be able to support myself comfortably. i don’t want to live my life just barely scraping by but i can’t even deal with attending school. i’m so fucking pathetic why would anyone love me. i want to have someone but i don’t even fucking deserve it. i just want to stop feeling so fucking miserable all the time so i can function and at least be worthy of love.,0.3946160962072156,2.7227442340425583,2.5988899167437585,90.98847826086958,88.04255319148935,5.184458834412581,22.535615171137835,6.7026698264267655,0.7064654949121194,708,27,148,9,23,239,105,188,0.23399999999999999,0.563,0.203,-0.9158,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,15,16,4,1,2,0,16,11,0,2,4,45,40,21,2,7,10,0,4,2,0,3,6,0,0,0,4,10,0,3,9,0,1,1,8,7,1,0,4,4,21,9,18,30,3,14,0,2,0,5,3,2,3,3,13,95,25,3,0.1123875810429417,0.0,0.10967406699444084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22291656190140105,0.07858400980664193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545300431510955,0.11889115868199099,0.0,0.1178362404603146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586666113314968,0.0,0.0,0.11664056541185484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846187465268398,0.10166100136378474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704796135328522,0.0,0.10790970252747492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31170152305453713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392773397175783,0.0,0.11095946860713443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353055070407525,0.09161087872062078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23814801655880385,0.10981379036317243,0.0,0.09924029309685266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028683595907563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922546302439999,0.0,0.0,0.08970669494840906,0.0,0.08261780354737527,0.0,0.17336046194983135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783891512052517,0.0,0.0,0.11968910587688313,0.0,0.08547581976151891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12117282096771985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274844642040952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095225632706199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28188315040395445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293377241844355,0.1275360951144392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201342392069156,0.0,0.08922318553347194,0.0655341023031248,0.1291729915278067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314455358047264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104993256348528,0.0,0.10141231112127036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413504397211445,0.0,0.07983691301567697,0.0,0.0,0.07237391742006953
mentalhealth,Saucy_Life,2020/01/27,"Online Therapy? I contacted a suicide prevention lifeline online and they were super understanding and helpful. It got to a point where they recommended professional help and they gave me this site called 7cups. It's free to have people listen to you but $150 a month to contact a therapist. After a week I figured that I might as well see if it helps instead of going straight to harming myself. 

So far the chat with my therapist has been like emailing eachother. At most we message twice a day. But Idk, Im starting to feel like my chat isnt having much thought put into it. She barely gives me any responses to what i said previously and then asks another question. Maybe two sentences each time. Idk, I've gone into detail about suicide and why I think about it daily and at most she has asked me about what i think of meditation. 

I guess Im just asking if Im wasting my time? The suicide prevention person was way more helpful. I do have the option to talk to someone else but Im just wondering if I even should.",4.073257575757577,5.921633030303035,5.088775252525256,80.61982954545458,72.23232323232324,7.77828282828283,29.546717171717173,8.472884824447931,2.32869595959596,812,34,149,14,16,266,126,198,0.126,0.733,0.141,-0.5588,0,0,0,0,0,3,17.0,1,1,3,1,10,6,0,0,9,0,12,0,0,0,0,35,31,15,3,4,8,0,1,2,0,2,0,2,0,1,9,11,0,2,8,2,1,3,1,1,1,2,8,4,23,6,21,21,5,21,0,0,1,0,28,9,0,10,10,101,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755478294904251,0.11649189952920895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31157409230550515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343954508188285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164653417791741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280490446724696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337663629088698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056172538691501336,0.07936568076172143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657162873994344,0.0631373638637673,0.0,0.08885213794032544,0.0,0.12238272770405575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978562596820172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4800029701263921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854997721203216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160900265558997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785333382621185,0.0,0.0,0.08867428817648923,0.0,0.08166698064711674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701869342099943,0.0970031239949328,0.0,0.0,0.10501987764690687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116803020700834,0.12445086964724462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056759740304582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852765169247354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412971017641712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863300899278468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36455689628266696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929326712776894,0.0,0.0,0.1270458389609928,0.2579777343238369,0.0,0.14236928713049934,0.0,0.08819634332275407,0.12955978093623602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085228389359696,0.11565292489567182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818136282310353,0.08911302356853837,0.0,0.09988697995732154,0.0,0.10024518801169804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047686338241105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Middle-Minimum,2020/01/27,"Statement of good health? Question from ex military I was working overseas and had a mental breakdown in a sensitive military operation. Without going into too much detail, I got treatment, but I had to follow through with treatment back home. However, I was more or less fine at this point, but (this is the part that's difficult to explain) I went through the motions because to not do so would've blown my cover and jeopardized the mission. I can't really give more detail than that.

Well, that was 3 years ago. The situation stabilized, the mission is over, and I'm honestly living a fulfilling life. However, and this may be a strange thing to want, but I would like a statement of good health, in writing. I had to sacrifice my mental credibility for the mission, and it quite literally saved lives.  It now that it is over, I am worried about the long term implications of having that on my health record. Is there a civilian equivalent to a mental fitness test or ""statement of good health""? I just don't want my credibility in risky situations questioned in the future, I did what I had to do.",5.124117647058824,7.0697513627451025,5.925637254901961,75.28786764705885,69.68627450980392,9.02156862745098,33.82843137254902,9.516144504307137,3.4672901960784315,874,43,151,20,16,286,117,204,0.057999999999999996,0.7879999999999999,0.153,0.9622,2,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,2,8,9,0,0,15,0,21,5,0,0,0,27,30,11,0,3,8,1,0,1,0,2,5,0,1,0,13,7,0,0,6,0,0,4,4,1,1,0,10,0,16,8,28,17,6,22,1,0,0,0,6,11,0,5,8,116,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955098030777914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502952671378637,0.0,0.07533649895592111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855435517786635,0.07023641797541348,0.3109726531636209,0.0988425160076587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5254619080505655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396621002003935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729200687770093,0.06037757283576725,0.0,0.21825630478219327,0.10936916995170144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3736349783402476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084947226966213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338309203653643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682812792201372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768878129536152,0.13144826123888992,0.0,0.0,0.07917195731628843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778302843364815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210463325548285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578771509812874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111809624681357,0.11456488295443445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191318936130786,0.0,0.08997162660716694,0.12550694967816894,0.0,0.17558301246665373,0.0,0.0,0.07958493110908069
mentalhealth,Character_Park,2020/01/27,"Neglecting childhood trauma during therapy I've had all kinds of therapy (including group therapy) for twenty years and my childhood past has always been neglected during that.

I've told therapists about how I suffered from emotional and mental neglect, but therapy has always been based on the DSM diagnosis, and the goals I'd chose, but nothing more.

To illustrate, one psychiatrist told me that it's ""no use to be afraid of things that aren't real"", no searching, no looking for cause and effect between neglect and anxiety, nothing. Not even an acknowledgement.

I know my childhood is causing me problems, and I know at least acknowledgement of the trauma would have helped.",9.0681684981685,10.06934206837607,8.477289377289377,64.05461538461539,59.94017094017094,11.813919413919413,40.64590964590965,11.491704259439757,5.29638070818071,550,28,79,15,7,174,78,117,0.24600000000000002,0.7440000000000001,0.01,-0.9807,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,3,10,0,1,4,0,10,0,0,5,1,26,16,9,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,4,5,0,0,0,5,9,0,1,5,1,7,1,12,9,3,7,0,5,1,0,4,2,0,0,5,56,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376499479677377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924522645045373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29339958714302405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606360986034102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943211763695011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571899933806527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14870914937857985,0.1569634882657739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992000567388235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391357832596285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740499769755487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676817986622996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13632327207215092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13664483900177204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16254304499907962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6532386105106472,0.16580729649489895,0.09487311617418163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729120757420596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233374347087674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144438187871213,0.0,0.0,0.09196156313531602
mentalhealth,blahblahgourd,2020/01/27,"I might be psychotic but I don’t know how to get a diagnosis This is a throwaway acc, I wanna remain anonymous on this. I have diagnosed OCD, depression, and anxiety, and I think I’m psychotic or have some psychotic disorder. 

All my life I’ve thought I need to please some weird God-like entity that is always watching me by doing what I don’t want to do or else he will punish me. I find that almost everything in my life is directly linked to having been bad earlier or I’m just a bad person. I have constant paranoid delusions about specifically my partner, and earlier I caught myself thinking “I need to hit myself again for good luck.”

I’m failing classes and I just put my two weeks into work. I have no idea what is going on with me and I just started seeing a new therapist (who specializes in gender dysphoria), so I don’t think it’s quite appropriate to bring this up the second visit. If anyone has any advice on how to handle this I’m willing to try anything.",3.4168458549222787,5.235302948186534,5.255307642487047,78.8692827072539,73.92227979274611,8.555569948186529,28.12467616580311,9.188382445141503,2.606927720207254,771,31,143,18,16,264,119,193,0.184,0.755,0.062,-0.9783,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,8,9,1,0,5,0,20,3,0,2,1,35,39,13,0,5,8,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,10,7,0,0,8,0,0,5,4,6,0,2,3,2,24,3,20,31,3,17,0,2,2,0,5,7,0,9,5,102,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601502453420439,0.0,0.0,0.16411096643880058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636861621397894,0.0,0.0,0.11145000869058068,0.0,0.12537448870852336,0.0,0.0,0.11459486440130358,0.0,0.13486652386178535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736806162722071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17710557771253813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411571892494517,0.16634368918901438,0.0,0.0,0.1878307713878514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690806842722156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14729269204620624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14979140042654984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562513735335801,0.0,0.09314178579027267,0.1374621555906505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18501051439575694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006900221930005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23151902218737735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17386012500610504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430429474036403,0.0,0.15828483097675175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310138471442013,0.0,0.17990069511040893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16475351734433313,0.0,0.17431591962879306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13059816035791394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160013410672912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19028753655994785,0.0,0.3150399897983221,0.0,0.13010940613514468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126974195317994,0.0,0.16009555038339254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966658645325319,0.0,0.13146171528880596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193130033422353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jackysiz1,2020/01/27,"Has anyone ever ""broken up"" with their therapist? I have been seeing my therapist for about a year now. Shes great. But I am wanting and ready to do some trauma work, specifically interested in using EMDR and she is not qualified with this approach. I have an appointment with an EMDR therapist this week but I low-key feel like I'm cheating on my therapist lol. I dont want to have 2 therapists so I need to break up with the one i have now so i can continue on in my recovery and focus on some much needed trauma work. 

Anyone have any experience or advice to do this? I have some anxiety about bringing it up although i know it is not rational. Any experience or words would help!",2.5674188034188035,4.825900066666667,4.8051851851851834,79.10794871794873,77.96296296296295,8.598290598290598,25.1994301994302,9.265573868473778,2.4621225071225066,539,20,102,15,13,187,80,135,0.114,0.763,0.12300000000000001,0.3333,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,7,6,1,0,4,1,17,0,0,1,1,26,27,10,0,5,6,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,1,2,16,3,19,25,4,17,0,0,1,0,4,8,0,5,7,80,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865220150893605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790604684446158,0.0,0.1007160741524901,0.0,0.0,0.18411313145800465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542992302589593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908990998484854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575686246241114,0.0,0.0,0.0665689614093964,0.094054694036053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14515062040106624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824588632718874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235440319481135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432021244138551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678191888347663,0.19524172553040828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892131537063443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491236405650242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7643107397638974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370805502005102,0.0,0.0,0.15530761450054353,0.0,0.10560607665585484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19169350026080606,0.0,0.0,0.09352426847029033,0.0,0.0,0.08478180615164922
mentalhealth,ruepee,2020/01/27,"[VENT] Feeling emotionally dead So long story short I’ve lost a copious amount of people in the last 5 years. My mother, 2 grandparents(one recently), 3 friends all due to overdose or suicide. I just got back from my grandfathers funeral, who I was really close to. That’s been haunting me. 

I haven’t been able to address it or sort through it and I can’t afford counseling. 

My husband and I have been bickering but nothing too bad until he blew up at me and told me I don’t “contribute enough”. I work 5 days a week and do 99% of the housework including dinners every other night, all the shopping and meal planning as well. I’ve been exhausted lately. Physically and mentally. 

He said and did some things that really hurt me but I can’t feel anything since then. Nothing makes me happy and I can’t even feel sad about being hurt or my grandfather. I’m worried I’ll end up suicidal again or I’ll end up self harming. I haven’t tried either of those things since I was a teenager. 

All this is just weighing on me and I needed somewhere to talk about it..",2.4076694139194146,4.787959721153847,3.8170879120879135,85.33743589743591,79.19230769230771,7.231135531135532,26.73168498168498,8.269060116576782,2.0139127289377297,834,35,161,17,21,274,129,208,0.212,0.742,0.045,-0.9899,2,0,0,0,0,1,24.0,0,0,0,3,10,10,0,0,6,0,17,4,0,1,3,29,27,19,4,1,9,2,3,0,1,0,1,1,1,1,11,10,3,0,3,1,1,0,6,7,1,0,11,4,22,3,19,15,7,23,0,4,0,0,10,8,0,6,15,105,33,1,0.14203898254355096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168859801276882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921921003283952,0.11859661745160065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160339314874548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597747374371081,0.25160875825995466,0.1467642383808507,0.0,0.09381540836846664,0.0,0.11967396888402584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21545753210376506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973896557021708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11360154984807085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512031381217582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041113370659662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578072846345715,0.16022615909172916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570002984492668,0.0,0.0,0.15505232829803944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481212379859552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431418864786676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053201057866303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332939631325649,0.0,0.2725804691261611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847194611991464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18198761866682514,0.0,0.14024635955122353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351115989986337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817763634396516,0.0,0.0,0.2349922283007418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107351860858081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416555382747375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188728777134884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357243347672353,0.0,0.09643514546338522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393510413708502,0.0,0.1277101035026975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340607096782256,0.1442474815092635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914684478270766
mentalhealth,Heavyheartedsoul,2020/01/27,"I just want someone to listen For a while now things have gotten very dark and rough again and i am still struggling to figure out why. 
After years in therapy I learnt that speaking out can help, but it hasn’t lately. Lately every time i tell anyone i am struggling they offer me something materialistic. For example a ride in the morning instead of a taking the bus or some extra money so i can go out more. I know they’re trying to make life a bit easier on me and i really appreciate it. I feel so ungrateful but i don’t want these things, I just want someone to listen to me for once and let me maybe cry out my anxieties and thoughts.",2.908520084566593,4.739851240310077,4.625496828752644,82.78763213530655,75.35658914728683,7.171529245947852,23.35517970401691,8.00094639256281,1.2844046511627911,506,15,99,8,11,171,83,129,0.13,0.7659999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.7476,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,2,6,0,8,1,0,1,0,23,20,11,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,6,9,0,0,4,0,1,2,2,2,0,0,2,5,17,0,17,17,4,18,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,2,9,74,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13025206707349785,0.0,0.0,0.1190530714663824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858850079010385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18702783193731126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14345539462704893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609097305939235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676538070121117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412487233613115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357305333133326,0.0,0.3841321065294497,0.0,0.0,0.17410724180740952,0.1202630276596726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11365304219280095,0.0,0.17105382567054558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18132640101680855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907595819098423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885295388692266,0.1310781222876078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135973648620382,0.0,0.0,0.35599536852826075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280179016600288,0.0,0.14881889548982494,0.0,0.19471257938629585,0.0,0.22623266741994905,0.0,0.0,0.13517119207725808,0.09928274446896067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559858820904688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048624962535464,0.3012796813891141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363745313071508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964491611097886
mentalhealth,reprehensible01,2020/01/27,"What's the goal? I'm depressed, I'm on meds and in therapy. I get being happy and having energy, but what does that mean, how does that feel? Why put so much effort into it when my experiences with these emotions haven't been that great. I'm not depressed like crying and feeling bad all the time, I'm just not ""happy"" but I'm alright with that, they say I'm depressed but I feel like they make a much bigger deal out of it than it really is for me. Like, it's okay, I'm not hurting others or myself, I have self control and I get what I need to get done done, so what is there to work for?",1.291309949892625,2.794722196850394,3.2213886900501087,92.5305368647101,79.0,5.878024337866857,19.419470293486047,6.574015621080383,-0.017434645669291537,457,10,105,4,11,154,74,127,0.184,0.6759999999999999,0.141,-0.8791,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,4,6,13,0,0,3,2,9,0,0,3,1,25,25,12,0,1,8,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,14,8,0,1,4,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,3,4,10,8,12,21,3,8,0,4,0,0,5,5,0,1,5,68,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258008085227047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16465971462578927,0.0,0.0,0.16126371124404248,0.0,0.15135449457109534,0.3793412900064608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25694855372584263,0.3004748671346482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16514130549451575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360819025750246,0.0,0.0,0.2226943927493417,0.10488097620936916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23010623995355156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16185836253131528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125636007898131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15716296588665946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151716107309008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799670556160923,0.0,0.0,0.15991895023858474,0.1630726319450697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21584424330856036,0.10885763321170153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14758443438082247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940501402554568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674907414370984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315467703751473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16788984212926725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560599601520838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247304222746012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068793091423893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,linuxman33,2020/01/27,"Abilify Ok first off let me start by saying I didn't have ANY of these issues prior to taking Abilify. Before treatment I was starting to become more social and was starting to improve and feel better then I got put into the hospital. I noticed almost immediately being on it that I became socially awkward. After a matter of a week or so my memory and cognitive functions were greatly impaired and still are. Then they switched me to high dose injections that last about a month, after being on those for a few months I developed anxiety, social anxiety, depression and just recently now, mood swings. I don't even want to leave the house to socialize with people. I've been off the Abilify for a while now and its still affecting me. I was always the optimistic type no matter how shitty things were and ever since those medications I've been real negative and cynical about things. I legit have ZERO motivation to do anything and can't focus on anything more then a couple seconds. What the fuck did they do to me? Anyone else experience anything like this?",7.282840136054425,8.037079903061226,7.998367346938777,66.8097278911565,63.74489795918368,11.02312925170068,34.1904761904762,10.864195022040775,4.125014965986395,855,35,133,22,12,286,123,196,0.134,0.779,0.086,-0.8652,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,3,11,9,2,1,11,1,19,3,0,3,1,23,27,16,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,11,11,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,4,0,3,10,2,16,4,24,14,3,29,0,1,0,1,7,7,1,2,22,112,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235775937477325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167363395061847,0.0,0.0,0.0830948329754905,0.0,0.18695327745636606,0.0,0.0,0.08543957267614,0.1252002687886607,0.30166111441211235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495159838892426,0.1039764957831448,0.0,0.0,0.10806900190127014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520325864868382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524389546291904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020758384195486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070674403249835,0.1105297698058686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11952734195759837,0.0,0.0,0.06178400824832641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039365563875746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11296464763340333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772820227220856,0.13471724566883986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12910268550262916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099330273752633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275368286571132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960288803834964,0.0,0.12938381384455713,0.0,0.12494972331769667,0.0,0.05969689855265992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309570745784047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950651716917889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13911654056175493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471263183834515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228368321070304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908138587683486,0.0,0.0,0.12064997891748053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717207969396567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107858585769944,0.0,0.0,0.4982379206639401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594646382042175,0.0,0.19516557263491605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187326860204137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623580323603985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207207933076634,0.0,0.09801514959879992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suffocatingsilently,2020/01/27,guilt why do you think people that aren’t in a relationship sometimes feel guilty about having one night stands?,10.4715,10.06113915,7.550000000000002,76.55500000000005,57.5,10.0,30.0,8.841846274778883,2.1175,93,2,16,1,1,26,20,20,0.23399999999999999,0.7659999999999999,0.0,-0.5994,1,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21695136703287016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4026543964809519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907498516444176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974640494092426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4606620551121109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4243625371044908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749315963454056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3871701561691284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Adhelmir,2020/01/27,"How do you cope? Hello Reddit.

I just wanted to know how you all cope with life when it seems hopeless. I have been struggling for years. I want to disclaim that I'm safe, I don't think I'm capable of harming myself or worse. I just feel overwhelmed and lost and alone. I don't know how else to explain it. I have family where I live but the sense of being alone persists. So I ask, for those of you who have felt or feel out of place in the world, without a sense of purpose, what helps you get past that and find yourself again? My apologies if this is the wrong subreddit for this.",1.883295454545454,3.781463708333334,2.627878787878789,95.65227272727276,78.58333333333334,5.363636363636363,21.74242424242424,6.1124844417494595,0.08558333333333312,455,13,101,3,11,142,77,120,0.166,0.7709999999999999,0.063,-0.8859999999999999,0,2,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,4,0,2,9,7,0,2,4,0,9,1,0,3,1,28,24,12,0,3,7,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,9,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,3,15,1,15,20,1,9,0,3,0,0,10,5,0,4,4,69,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42971465186085545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19393927139181175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17329921837323342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19556693530562533,0.0,0.2097875560598844,0.0,0.1991860988471706,0.0,0.18960703274221136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838491512518696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390504555949565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22801998251197586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14652922228953996,0.0,0.0,0.18318359116390776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264579615581153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19803605575606453,0.0,0.0,0.2167428009220501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18885617383418926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21687348765549205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329266288333796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447206941023471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19997596968370188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21141093542486053,0.0,0.2268157925683761,0.0,0.13359204901450358
mentalhealth,berkeley_calmprogram,2020/01/27,"Participants for Behavior and Mental Health Study Hi, my name is Morgan and I am a project coordinator at UC Berkeley, in Berkeley California with the CALM Program. We are conducting a paid research study and seeking participants. We received a five-year grant from NIH, we aim to shed light on two core mechanisms involved in a broad range of mental health conditions: reward sensitivity and executive function, as assessed using self-report questionnaires, behavioral tasks, and brain imaging.

We are looking for individuals who have survived an attempt in the past year. While we anticipate the study will help inform future research on treatment, the study itself does not involve or change treatment in any way.

We are interested in recruiting people ages 18-55 who are experiencing difficulties related to their mood or behavior. Past substance abuse is okay if it was over six months ago. The study involves an eligibility phone call (lasting up to 40 minutes), and then 3-4 visits to UC Berkeley (2-3 hours each) for those who are eligible. We pay $30/hour and cover public transportation or parking costs.

If interested, please follow this link to our pre-screen survey:

https://ucbpsych.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_aibSRaNwipK3QDH

If you have questions for us, we welcome those at calmprogram@gmail.com or (510) 542-8969.

Thank you

Sincerely, Morgan

Here are some further answers to FAQs:

how personal information will be used: 

we de-identify all surveys, questionnaires, and tasks. There is only one document that is password protected, encrypted, and accessible by senior staff to link names to id numbers.

how privacy/confidentiality is protected or a link to a privacy policy: See above, I have included UC Berkeley's Protection of Human Subjects email here as well for further inquiries: 510/642-7461
ophs@berkeley.edu

to whom you are accountable (department, faculty, school, organization): we are operating under Dr. Sheri Johnson, a professor at UC Berkeley in the department of Psychology

declare any conflicts of interest (sponsorship by any private business): We are funded by the NIH, a government organization.",10.258749006095947,12.129285154518955,9.549346673734432,54.36766167505968,57.5131195335277,12.650357805459848,43.57924728332893,12.161744961471696,6.300546355685133,1740,96,227,55,22,554,220,343,0.028999999999999998,0.845,0.125,0.9848,0,0,0,0,1,0,78.0,13,3,1,3,6,11,0,0,17,1,22,4,1,4,1,47,29,23,0,3,9,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,10,22,0,4,7,0,5,6,1,0,1,3,2,5,20,10,40,24,3,36,0,0,2,0,40,17,0,10,12,141,30,11,0.0,0.17487426044523027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13083280549727505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011060916645376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476325007019332,0.15070954956704152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15613443995288007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291601385608613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137701525767403,0.0,0.0,0.098928867133587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29069989637251464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030846869694088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394143680995047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974792333263858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178077893349298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000132311761254,0.11225157022546213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28178954989719485,0.10232280626074801,0.12887302318886867,0.0,0.1620134319379585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16533859064953446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14937258501908895,0.1176129761554504,0.0,0.15397229539198487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358843408370927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441774838040025,0.0,0.17753690689087462,0.2549469337389699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11715291578157315,0.0,0.0,0.13270435584093554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19009085602073825
mentalhealth,ther0waway,2020/01/27,"Can other things cause this burning and tightness in my chest? I always thought it was from PTSD or before/during panic attacks.  It always happens when I think too much about trauma or reminders but recently its been happening without reminders of the trauma and without panic.  It feels horrible, really really horrible.  I feel like I need to curl up in a ball and just lay there.  And it was okay before because I knew my triggers and i could deal with it bu its happening when im not triggered now and i just dont get why.  im watching tv and i feel it and then the next 40min im just not functional.  its getting really hard to deal with at work i just dont get why its happening",1.839436274509808,4.325594463235299,3.4768823529411783,86.28380392156866,82.30882352941177,6.5678431372549015,24.507843137254905,7.793537801064563,1.589917254901961,541,21,103,10,15,179,79,136,0.18100000000000002,0.7759999999999999,0.042,-0.9623,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,1,2,3,1,7,1,1,3,0,33,21,14,0,2,11,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,13,10,0,1,6,2,0,0,6,5,0,0,5,6,11,2,13,15,1,10,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,2,7,71,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008247304261044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13728673511839098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356316444442561,0.0,0.10268665987901388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239678222086695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635022180139448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488239735721913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28286349600075705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18305271955471727,0.08621118694393072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18914518901883068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4268546840722345,0.0,0.10810227925400227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3910534004815752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05895635423503767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871098021388968,0.08947996201287732,0.0,0.0,0.1283406351004909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28317532012946084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410641599716608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319250215829449,0.0,0.1191533072565605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017198464924992,0.0773245130016032,0.0,0.09580351820829174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177832171528276,0.0,0.0,0.2326553317950788,0.0,0.08785379802833654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway234693,2020/01/27,"I'm kind of an idiot  For a while now I've found that i have a lot of the symptoms typically attributed to ADHD and when hearing other people's stories about it i can really relate. I know that armchair diagnosis is not good and should not be taken seriously but for some reason i've convinced myself that this is true and i cant get rid of the thought. I started going to a therapist (unrelated to this issue) and i feel like my answers have become biased because i've convinced myself that i might have ADHD. i really don't want this and just want an honest opinion on my mental health, so i really don't know what to do.",6.073475815523063,5.578526606299217,7.745556805399327,71.84519685039373,66.4015748031496,10.091788526434195,31.528683914510694,9.606745405546679,2.8970683914510693,497,17,92,9,7,175,79,127,0.08,0.763,0.157,0.9145,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,9,1,0,7,0,13,2,0,2,1,25,26,9,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,10,5,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,3,2,13,7,11,20,2,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,5,69,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4410221042724205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184960594442908,0.2026426887300116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277457771100864,0.13108037644254514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011797687843838,0.0,0.0,0.09586235637458312,0.0,0.10427768455360073,0.15389693441154567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950339747957066,0.2067988095772308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19150870519290802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19106943266468202,0.20167504674282533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08964058355715321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559907858404238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849078276514353,0.1946465930195811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720409161546273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3526319519914468,0.18865120477955094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298702955819098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19070921444294395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130380424158916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14566510074186131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21644619422526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YungestBongs,2020/01/27,"Trust issues/panicking Hey all. (21M) Here. And i’m slowly but surely coming to the conclusion that i have some deep seeded trust issues. Now, this may play a part with my anxiety/depression, but i’m truly unsure. I have been cheated on in the past, about a year or so ago. But i didn’t think it affected me that much, i found out by investigating her instagram/messages on her phone, which honestly may have lead me to where i am in this point in my life. 

So, me and my girlfriend have been together about 5 months now. And it’s been a constant struggle for me almost. Lots of times when i’m feeling extremely anxious, i’ll look through her social media’s and convince myself she’s either cheating, talking to other people, playing me, etc. And it’s coming to the point where i’m really struggling with it, like someone leaving heart eyes under her photo-and me instantly thinking that that’s the guy she’s cheating on me with. 

It’s honestly putting quite a bit of strain on the relationship, because i ask her these things and of course she gets upset at them. I’ve been trying to take control of my anxiety to find out if that’s the issue, but nothing really seems to be working. I have therapy scheduled sometime this week, but figured why the hell not ask reddit first. 

So i guess my question really is, how do i get past these trust issues? Like, i like to say i trust her. But honestly, most of the time i do not. She hasn’t shown any signs of her being untrustworthy, it’s just the way my brain works, kinda like always protecting itself from possible harm. If anyone has any advice on how to get past trust issues, and things like this in relationships, please tell me. Any advice is good advice, because i’m in between a rock and a hard place here. Thanks for reading. 

TL;DR - cheated on years ago, struggle with daily anxiety, now me and my girlfriend are left with my terrible trust issues.",4.600731707317074,5.999844628726287,5.377398373983741,80.85113821138214,70.19241192411924,8.17669376693767,28.300813008130078,8.626192665926032,2.1466520325203247,1504,54,279,25,27,489,189,369,0.145,0.667,0.188,0.9605,0,0,0,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,1,7,16,32,5,5,15,0,22,4,3,5,2,56,43,24,0,2,13,0,2,5,2,2,1,1,0,1,22,18,0,2,9,4,0,4,4,12,0,1,6,5,42,20,43,33,9,45,1,0,2,0,26,22,1,13,23,187,64,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24224373197117405,0.14649815493309232,0.0,0.08274491011575613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06875718994344984,0.0,0.0,0.1685796108258493,0.0,0.12642788016076068,0.0933516531671418,0.0,0.05777884294008565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15450120827373431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007444941629388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021372186490338,0.0,0.0,0.0922456414670621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142361848013655,0.0,0.0892968058553719,0.09267982047895118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711715931609867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215752325002488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04178167559803257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552497089845722,0.07028750003250063,0.0,0.09060270651319717,0.0,0.0,0.12951683451200074,0.0,0.0,0.06930855356889329,0.0,0.0,0.09102945223493768,0.08181955962230222,0.0,0.0,0.07402284501730999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979203808867635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312363791885992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874963067459443,0.08978088444433048,0.0,0.05836605894380077,0.20185129779140376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06939082190969438,0.0,0.0,0.07025153410634588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595679007538023,0.0,0.060744687207539075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928849335773425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894833750069659,0.23664735107410845,0.05728724637448845,0.0,0.08633378991982754,0.09070610678673932,0.15622959408284695,0.09315617562256777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306888491205906,0.09256775614239622,0.08789025751553711,0.08265525870289862,0.0,0.15881024939291466,0.0,0.0,0.17743361390390391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571299638963482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522588601559681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423383235411455,0.0700145855313268,0.0,0.0817260481173716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25915753662097396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788052756586256,0.0,0.06212965480376359,0.06641719258427188,0.07222479422928323,0.0760772695398179,0.09449791932496712,0.0,0.10979525011637288,0.10589564774129837,0.0,0.0,0.09636781359231987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056102312942948165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06559014744734598,0.06628312568795859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456333687838537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203154664362517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642575297091776
mentalhealth,omgtherearenonames,2020/01/27,"SO seems to have control issues My SO seems to display a lot of behaviors that others have said are ‘red flags’. Holding grudges, being controlling, easily offended, need to ‘win’ arguments by saying nasty things, judgemental, and etc. I’m just starting to wonder what I’m dealing with here. Obviously I know no one can diagnose him, but I’m wondering if anything would match up with the above description.",6.965,8.60385327777778,7.070444444444441,70.01899999999999,64.83333333333333,11.315555555555555,36.62222222222222,11.20814326018867,4.7861522222222215,324,16,51,10,5,104,60,72,0.102,0.8740000000000001,0.024,-0.5499,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,4,2,1,0,2,0,6,1,0,2,1,18,17,5,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,4,3,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,3,3,1,9,14,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,6,1,35,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17094969591069253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4659889976413826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21416753142682893,0.0,0.2108484913029056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316814580696385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168232599568244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416671906030845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17661040878051978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15403421383674987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14076784004773218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976052794149649,0.16520065080711005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3782315830990866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470371847131513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801110717282133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4505634221996045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475702709484057,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yoooaaddrriiaann,2020/01/27,"High and Low OC

This has been my personal struggle with bipolar disorder 

Thought I would share and maybe someone else will relate :) 

The high is the best moments of your life... too bad most of is blurred so you can’t remember when you try 
Better than any drug you can buy, you feel invincible like nothing can make you come down 
The high is driving fast without a seatbelt... having no disregard for my own life, or my future
Because you now live in the moment  
It’s making decisions without even thinking twice 
Putting myself in harms way not even fearing the death that could come
And if you’re face to face with death, you approach with a smile...
Your mind racing at a millions miles per second, and you’re just begging yourself to slow down 



The rollercoaster falls

Lows lower than the deepest of trenches and canyons 
It’s like the glass is half empty... in the middle of the desert 
Feeling the like the sheer force of gravity is just too much for your weak fragile body and mind 
Feeling like the walls you’ve built up.. were a paper wall ready to break 
It’s hearing how shitty your life your life is , you’re reminded of everything wrong in your life
EVERY mistake highlighted
But only in the voices in your head 

Roller coaster climbs again",4.716593505039191,6.727592919148936,4.247301231802911,86.64105263157896,70.87234042553192,6.819708846584548,28.96416573348264,7.475848149327749,1.7047872340425534,996,39,183,11,19,299,149,235,0.147,0.721,0.133,-0.7017,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,14,0,3,11,16,0,2,18,0,16,12,4,3,0,37,26,12,2,4,8,0,4,4,0,2,8,2,0,1,5,11,0,1,7,1,1,7,5,9,0,4,3,6,19,7,28,20,4,36,0,2,0,0,17,19,0,4,12,116,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056458996489768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891864025118896,0.07221904378320272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432838724395485,0.10477829383999893,0.0,0.13159497776502005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20410517954713195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945897439207223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577844683408824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373891698814851,0.0,0.09896762257190804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15649843696774818,0.0,0.09981723366015917,0.0,0.10647442273848354,0.0,0.0,0.13331322131563134,0.17970804366557153,0.1692719319927897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158579828540175,0.0,0.13352583728003825,0.0,0.0,0.3755145012670408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41839913946046464,0.2315164966028503,0.0,0.10461238476351056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581611106119769,0.0,0.1190204086072174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23924461017044865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709008390955922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367646879134127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010281072166723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344462524838467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190964426658018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342049606144503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038040212444267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238519923726164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591166628233284,0.0,0.09405302950631522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804342793803259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403705422522564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22840433415555125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415865775986707,0.12952983840879398,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sethyboi12354,2020/01/27,"My mind is breaking My mind broke into two halves on november 26th 2019. One half is the normal me who doesn't want to hurt people unless absolutely necessary. The other half is a much more powerful darker said, that wants to torture and kill people for the fun of it. It affects my normal life because at random times I'll start laughing randomly, and I will laugh at things that shouldn't be laughed at. It continues to try and take over, and it takes most of my mental strength to stop it from taking over.",6.1357575757575775,6.519355858585862,6.101565656565657,80.70568181818183,66.17171717171718,9.024242424242424,29.631313131313128,8.841846274778883,2.216325252525253,406,13,77,6,6,128,71,99,0.146,0.6920000000000001,0.162,0.4342,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,0,9,2,0,4,0,7,1,0,1,0,18,14,5,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,10,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,4,1,1,6,5,16,10,3,12,0,2,0,0,2,7,0,3,4,54,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198342587596004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104445632366473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174883055256289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885132817158974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19810791712996048,0.0,0.3969825550178981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14451002261872656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38521626668704056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320871303981552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27256972255227696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869940247134217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13914139861771693,0.0,0.0,0.16435093765778486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4434144729551545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060001464438012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462825443782175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334659356241134,0.0,0.1920315626342317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318977257658583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,odorama_panorama,2020/01/27,"My relatives are just some cold pos Sometimes i wonder why i can't express my feelings without feeling the urge to cry somewhere but then i remember how it starts from home. Man i just get one damn hug per year (only on new year's eve when everyone goes ""ugh do i *have* to? ok..."") if i'm lucky enough i get one on christmas too and when i need some advice i feel ridiculous after i hear ""that's all?"" they just don't seem to care at all. They don't care about how i'm feeling or what i'm doing but if they see me wearing my fishnet jacket and saying ""i'll hang out with a friend"" they lose their mind blaming everything they know i like.

Hug your kids dammit!",0.42554347826087024,2.669101318840582,1.8824456521739137,96.92845108695651,86.53623188405795,4.6094202898550725,20.219202898550726,5.985473137389443,-0.09326231884057902,514,16,115,4,16,165,94,138,0.2,0.672,0.128,-0.8452,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,6,1,9,12,2,0,2,1,7,3,1,2,2,30,25,12,0,3,9,0,4,1,1,0,0,2,1,2,3,4,0,0,8,0,0,1,4,4,0,2,0,8,21,8,12,25,5,14,0,1,1,2,13,4,1,8,10,68,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16931276050708816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3533108636391277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19032370019036235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179029281380096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655623358063235,0.15571960092599715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504323902154711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338642734918077,0.0,0.18104784470523266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952824871906258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17379913547164272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522202959663677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464863093770619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19383945343235265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749484724183095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847395974574347,0.0,0.16734062206295008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23481798446356386,0.13177600185117014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19627570989983856,0.0,0.0,0.13778745145709706,0.0,0.0,0.13806994176074971,0.15773414221187612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713637256926079,0.0,0.12263800930607223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563449047383607,0.0,0.0,0.16702148201276598,0.18789873212170052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22315423244918967
mentalhealth,SimsSlut,2020/01/27,"Am I schizophrenic? What is happening to me? I went to therapy for depression and anxiety symptoms. It's been around 7 months or so. I have strange fits of panic attacks with a shitton of mumbling incoherent thoughts lately. 

I realised sometime during therapy that I can't remember my childhood up until 14-15 and from then to 20 I have some blurry memories. I know something bad happened but I can never recall what exactly. I just get triggered by some movies, games, arguments, sometimes music or smells. In the mild cases I get an anxiety attack but I can calm it down. In the worse cases which I am MORE AND MORE CONCERNED ABOUT, I apparently get full on panicky, violent fits after which I  usually faint and have no memory of. My boyfriend recorded the last one. I  was crying and swearing at him for recording, saying he doesn't understand, that it can't be, that I don't get it, how could it have been, that I'm tired of the beatings, that I can't stand it to go on any longer. 

I know some sort of abuse happened but for the life of me I can't recall any of it. I'm  fucking losing it and there's not one goddamn thing I can do to save myself.",3.30671052631579,5.1240492324561435,4.668070175438596,82.96815789473685,74.21929824561403,7.782456140350878,29.105263157894736,8.532816995589336,2.2971894736842104,907,39,174,17,19,301,133,228,0.243,0.713,0.044000000000000004,-0.993,2,0,1,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,0,2,6,10,4,1,7,0,22,6,0,2,2,30,38,15,0,1,7,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,18,8,0,0,5,1,0,2,9,8,0,2,5,2,26,2,29,31,6,23,0,2,0,1,4,11,1,6,9,129,44,0,0.0,0.15820274046461885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18160022998101494,0.0,0.20428922573196956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886364275859805,0.0,0.3038030300206081,0.0,0.0,0.11148600040571192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660712887220547,0.0,0.14666857822395474,0.0,0.0,0.11500303289496548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343972095112853,0.27904070745649023,0.0,0.07588411126694466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35422143922299715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676133011883585,0.10883894176592636,0.15061958782084214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431113592582613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493779125258479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657666298867102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029810514110083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18095707412286646,0.0,0.0,0.15666029243137952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125535748891702,0.0,0.0,0.10618272754313526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279241133818542,0.26411502068692244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13878136353306916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053900254853961,0.0,0.08870664685194703,0.0,0.0,0.10600222626466464,0.0,0.15346487119177568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900199317898942,0.0,0.0,0.1470565525505338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377701733653393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607118877395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angularnoise,2020/01/27,"Reddit is my therapist Full confession, reddit may be responsible for one of the most important aspects of my mental health—not feeling completely alone in the world. 

Somehow, a healthy ratio of intelligent, aware, thoughtful people is retained here. Those who speak their mind openly and not just idiotically, although some idiots are damn funny. There’s a democratic tone that offers me empathy and hope. As a cynic, I’m always grasping to find that balance between how the world is and any possible shroud of sanity and human decency to keep me going—believing. 

I can tell that daily dose of comments, relating to relevant subjects, actually has a profound impact on my mental state. 

I’m not sure if this is something anyone cares about, but I want to thank all the participants (the idiots too) for constantly thinking, wanting to know things, weighing in their experiences,  knowledge and yes, ethical values. You motherfuckers really make me feel a less alone and not crazy. Thank you!",9.234705882352939,10.128654823529411,9.017647058823533,60.68941176470591,59.58823529411765,11.976470588235294,39.352941176470594,11.602472056035307,5.216341176470588,800,38,112,22,10,259,123,170,0.067,0.737,0.196,0.9631,0,2,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,2,0,7,10,5,0,10,1,9,2,0,2,2,36,24,11,0,4,6,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,7,7,1,2,9,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,1,3,12,5,18,21,5,9,1,0,0,0,11,7,1,6,1,80,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.16380279904941622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476954453098548,0.0,0.0,0.13966926056435566,0.0,0.0,0.11414752701808785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736850031746515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18911571926306076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113991572213305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17599334597337382,0.18139221301563332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16419493254808662,0.0,0.0,0.16974561469765012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534169277163268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17842259569075267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16671843109764012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491977214233297,0.0,0.0,0.0922490180585216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204488010587207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383178198328313,0.0,0.16948625081603408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374326183239658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11636990033294847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892319069017856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753256069652377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292233996807887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582018652366724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671314538469912,0.3090776685644291,0.0,0.1948932259035147,0.11151576591367936,0.10755505590888116,0.0,0.1332585535578697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19801109956102803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lukascrue51,2020/01/27,"Should I start exercising and going to therapy? I don't really post here or anywhere but. 
After dropping out and somehow getting lucky with job opportunities, I have been extremely depressed. 
I was on antidepressants and Adderall from 14-17 yrs old  and those helped but I had this idea that being hopped up on pills was not ideal and got off them cold turkey. I usually relied on humor to make friends, date, and to get by in everyday conversation. 
But Im just not happy at 19. I'm getting my own place soon, so I can be closer to work and to hang out with my coworker (ik it sounds wierd) 
I just can't find happiness in anything I do. I am lonely and feel I need to talk to a professional, and start exercising as a last hope to get SOMETHING going. Will this help a little. I'm miserable looking for help.",3.1181940700808615,5.150410886792455,4.869474393531,80.37919811320756,75.35220125786164,8.064869721473496,26.45148247978437,8.841846274778883,2.155801078167116,637,24,123,14,14,216,108,159,0.134,0.7170000000000001,0.149,0.3728,1,2,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,3,6,11,0,1,3,0,14,3,0,1,0,31,30,15,0,4,8,0,1,0,1,2,3,1,0,0,5,13,0,0,3,2,0,3,4,3,0,0,5,4,14,8,25,21,1,27,0,3,1,0,7,13,0,4,9,83,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796363501581976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439876093661594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477008759048972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15323125046313074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952782340879435,0.0,0.35036582421608325,0.0,0.1905614376575768,0.0,0.13408693449248044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3569381809227837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371215963901285,0.0,0.0,0.1665166553170652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18925914564494647,0.18109335437364565,0.0,0.16636913145052534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366590770437001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16803174224247244,0.0,0.0,0.1407857862822968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190927456427756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431212553208693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17592298490577926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751610683097482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16056464965832534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740241631939096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906700334135898,0.0,0.0,0.2373304541719287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13475264340878346,0.0,0.0,0.1917251231224844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18464542578891435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220529392647425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Knsclion,2020/01/27,"Going through a rough patch in my life and need advice about taking a medical leave from work. I live in Toronto and have been struggling with depression for the last several months. I’m having a hard time managing and coping with the stress of work, school and home life. I do not have the time to get real help because of my schedule. How do I go about getting a mental health or medical leave from my job?",5.6454999999999975,6.16338755,5.695000000000004,82.73000000000002,67.25,8.9,29.75,8.841846274778883,2.2178250000000004,324,11,63,5,5,102,55,80,0.162,0.804,0.033,-0.8126,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,2,7,0,6,5,0,1,0,11,13,6,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,1,2,6,0,13,12,0,9,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,5,39,6,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699586086895752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602375913965197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14980232743402236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18173845668920754,0.0,0.19769246422279832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558036566892446,0.0,0.0,0.18487535108583789,0.0,0.0,0.11657902380866485,0.0,0.1744620970548453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17259485429660484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177301573327072,0.0,0.3683253334733105,0.0,0.0,0.24569834914768895,0.0,0.0,0.15357996595034898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504245712915308,0.17527663880811825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882618365757265,0.0,0.0,0.12896402719931396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19796602183392192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17602253669586515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19648702934919088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19923180295328108,0.18182536240301844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130770810079013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20283545898998945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532405992049684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,what_theducking_duck,2020/01/27,"Experience with ECT? Do any of you have experience with ECT (electro convulsive therapy)? The subject has come up the last few times I've seen my doctor and psychiatrist. I know it's not like in the movies, but I can't help being a little scared. I've read about it and recent studies show few side-effects, but I haven't found that many personal accounts about what it's like. I would love to hear your story!",2.588796296296298,4.9415810123456785,3.8007253086419763,85.84701388888892,78.38271604938272,7.012962962962964,23.70524691358025,8.07648339933343,1.3885172839506177,326,11,65,6,8,106,60,81,0.138,0.79,0.07200000000000001,-0.5219,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,1,4,0,7,2,0,0,0,11,13,4,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,5,5,0,0,2,2,1,1,3,1,0,0,2,2,7,3,8,9,2,7,0,0,1,1,6,3,0,0,5,38,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15336111707483208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942652370585244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23082895048683896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4412030454170253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472706909121033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541770717450573,0.0,0.15116108901035613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393971930963887,0.1838286404396081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203550502505793,0.22602996738559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035403177689853,0.0,0.0,0.2286415607081515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19691508751415268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22558071070434696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22267347895503165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22578454378408835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25790141045993203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315023400829135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16020271152866522,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashclimbs,2020/01/27,Does anyone else have a voice in their head narrating their life I know I sound crazy but it’s not a voice I don’t recognize. It’s my own voice like I narrate my own life. I think everything out in my head. The only time it’s quite is when I’m really focused on something or high. I don’t mind it because it’s me and just my thoughts but sometimes it gets annoying. Just to reiterate it’s my own voice and it doesn’t tell me to do things it is just a narrative can’t get rid of. HMU w advice or if you can relate,0.4020813397129146,2.1300720789473684,2.7360287081339716,93.90538277511965,82.59649122807015,6.601594896331737,20.889952153110045,7.686295010490155,0.6001684210526319,403,12,98,7,11,138,67,114,0.051,0.879,0.069,0.429,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,2,1,4,2,1,0,4,0,9,4,2,0,0,16,15,8,0,1,9,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,10,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,5,16,1,7,14,3,7,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,3,3,61,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112829085336758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151182636042914,0.22153793699903404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318027276018386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892113046638985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18061998492260134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943202042232994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22592694784793496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4437981732289343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284431406099181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11882617299134353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30543826070418073,0.10563178400935423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21831563070236829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16444133840041364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299713898298036,0.0,0.0,0.13851293952442165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16645295926356451,0.21384227788303906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889815410558288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436437153543984,0.1385419156593585,0.0,0.17165065028224336,0.1260767726318671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,princessjasmin69,2020/01/27,"My anxiety and adhd are really bad - I feel like a failure I am going through a really hard time in college. And I am stuck with one really important exam... I have failed several times. I can only take it twice. 
All my friends are working or are just studying for finals. I am at home thinking about my life and how much I hate my life. I have a terrible headache and people are pressuring me about this exam. All I wanna do is cry. I will take that exam in 4 weeks and all I do is obsess over it. I can’t stop. 
I feel like a complete failure. 
I have friends.. I am not lonely. things just seem to fall apart. 
I am bored, numb, sad and anxious .. I am in my room and I am quite anxious. I wish I could take a break just to refresh my brain",-0.04689605734767355,2.0824554967741946,2.3851075268817206,93.29988351254481,87.58064516129032,5.508960573476704,20.869175627240146,6.937597516519254,0.4951648745519708,562,19,126,8,18,192,87,155,0.281,0.625,0.094,-0.9806,0,2,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,0,3,6,14,1,2,5,0,22,4,1,1,3,25,33,9,0,3,5,0,3,2,2,1,3,0,2,0,5,8,0,1,4,0,0,2,2,10,0,2,1,3,27,4,13,30,4,15,0,3,0,0,2,7,0,2,7,91,32,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18074213465727834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150495805505065,0.3398006365975411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557116057367804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16788737333732182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768330443858825,0.0,0.0,0.12007589158454232,0.0,0.16519871123055987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520855762554473,0.2148803592417742,0.0,0.16474724555170078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323851988853005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547132273303938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347218233757883,0.14848110904060355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508555853221834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21245284161474204,0.14694801251082948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055553213440893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190961075351854,0.11438000446163844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426297835410556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599605601040034,0.0,0.0,0.2890351804767021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13691136198170284,0.0,0.16990031829877056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257345687190481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33922853325540203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991385963495104,0.09636521500849994,0.0,0.0,0.17538974027355225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120635508533077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17294354657575184,0.0,0.0,0.1094872739274601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,guyg1989,2020/01/27,"Advice/education needed on therapy So, I'm a 30y/o male in the United States that's been struggling with anxiety, depression, addiction to p*rn (was an alcoholic, now social and occasional drinker), low self-esteem and self-confidence, thoughts of self-harm to suicide (no attempt on either) lacking good cooping skills. For at least half of my life now.

I have finally decided to seek help from my troubles. But not sure where to start. Counseling? Therapy? Psychologist?  

I'm not against drugs if needed but if my issues can be talked out all the better. Any sugestionon what professional I should start looking.  Thanks for thehelp. Thanks",4.302123552123554,7.641913504504508,4.7237644787644815,75.31722972972976,80.62162162162161,8.576833976833978,31.351994851994853,9.04235418022936,3.776242728442728,513,26,79,15,14,162,87,111,0.113,0.736,0.151,0.8131,0,0,3,0,0,1,26.0,0,0,0,3,4,9,0,1,4,0,6,4,0,0,2,19,16,7,1,6,7,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,2,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,3,1,5,5,16,11,4,13,0,2,1,0,4,7,0,2,5,51,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17454988117232326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17111512057267514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888425031987793,0.0,0.12248816642236225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14160943386585828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13790752382405758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18568352139735067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17539905781667506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13429755578033786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732226113349068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16711931992932105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11309454104957067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13445696521133552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374477080306903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5011071703995488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632179177989006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266616074168143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16738782318623205,0.0,0.17514072263192576,0.0,0.15090726838761778,0.0,0.0,0.12869503353570155,0.0,0.2948262753596124,0.3662127959157547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711407843781605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DaceSpandy9,2020/01/27,"Other than therapy, what can I do to improve my mental health? Not just mental health, but overall coping with my current situation. I'm going through a breakup and it's so incredibly hard. I'm gonna see a therapist but what else is there for me? Should I try and get a diagnosis of depression, is there other outlets of support I can turn to? I'm just so lost right now and I'm willing to try anything.",1.4486043360433598,3.8258661097560975,3.792601626016261,84.09941734417345,83.02439024390246,6.571273712737128,27.40379403794038,7.793537801064563,1.9244753387533868,319,15,63,6,9,110,54,82,0.146,0.7879999999999999,0.067,-0.8193,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,3,0,7,2,0,0,0,10,18,7,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,2,6,1,9,14,0,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,43,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17201230133027992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18003558093478844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17461614080736834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920854565041394,0.0,0.11879547618663355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18724810438053224,0.0,0.0,0.44437415363818267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281788439300257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.421302285920957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785088401163048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665683185820663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349563223623793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372025906223152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390418290105811,0.2426977143096739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28383269374404274,0.2273625295438684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clullanc,2020/01/27,"For you with social phobia/anxiety - what are your symptoms, and how do you manage them/handle life? I have social phobia/anxiety, and avoiding eye contact is one of the things I have to do to be able to function properly. A facial expression, a laugh at the wrong time, a word etc. can trigger my mind and my anxiety in a second.
The short term effects are stress, lack of focus, sleep problems as well as a general feeling of being exposed and in danger whenever I go outside. It also makes it harder to make contact with people. I’m actually pretty socially competent, but it rarely shows because of the anxiety.
The long term effects of constant exposure to the triggers are, among others, heart problems and risking my own sanity.

If I put on headphones and avoid eye contact my life gets more bearable and most days I’m actually pretty fine. But I don’t know how long I would be able to function without these precautions.

The best thing I’ve ever done for my health is actually accepting my illness and allowing myself NOT to take part in life.



So how do YOU cope? Thankful to anyone who would like to share THEIR experience of living with this.",6.279980158730158,7.243647143518517,6.979920634920635,72.50000000000001,65.99074074074073,9.68994708994709,34.87301587301587,9.784248007369934,3.6275738095238097,917,42,152,19,14,303,131,216,0.121,0.728,0.151,0.9054,0,2,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,4,1,4,7,16,1,4,12,0,18,11,5,10,1,41,28,18,0,6,5,0,1,1,0,2,6,0,0,0,10,11,0,2,5,1,0,2,3,8,1,2,1,3,18,8,29,22,9,17,0,0,2,0,14,7,0,2,9,115,28,1,0.2272468342589254,0.0,0.3326401942301599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086460562742138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476864124122801,0.0,0.0,0.07944813513295766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926378046769137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924076626960728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227865484585032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327770421773304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11627620493126647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672014509323107,0.0,0.10277888585699417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114550457697278,0.0,0.0,0.057451413702348714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05936354581654589,0.0,0.06457480640734893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077637913809665,0.0,0.13464429637383696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062444458545283764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407667392865785,0.05551066226896842,0.0,0.1003315590028174,0.2011062972783099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168902646842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147272609055132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699416804407201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230430882300395,0.0,0.07877217091513898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23119172715295205,0.0,0.21744453003045802,0.0,0.11422291721350268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370547460244325,0.34747429448749045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015524042834564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809823602690897,0.08543066907262135,0.0,0.0,0.10460917670527753,0.0,0.0,0.15097269907685598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625472826350573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216109762321507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952891945170633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614296310273439,0.1242293697282234,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stressedsue,2020/01/27,"When will it end? I feel like venting anonymously is giving myself too much attention, luxury even. Ok maybe not myself, but the darkness i feel. Acknowledging it feels wrong. 

But where does this energy go? If i spew it out, it's gonna come back to me. And then what do it do? I don't trust anyone to help me through it. I a 💯 sure people will make it harder for me if i share. Also, share what exactly? What do i say? Where do i start? I feel sad? I am upset? Feels a lot of me me me. What do i do to not feel this way. 

Why am i not rooted in anything? Why am i not anchored to anything? I have this life, from the outside everyone will say it's perfect. A husband who loves me, a satisfactory job, decent house, money, no big debts, no children and relatively healthy siblings and mother. 

Why do i still feel like i am not in this life? Why is there a deeper feeling that says none of this is mine? Why am i hearing subtexts in everyone's words that only translate to how much i am a liability or burden? On my good days, i feel like i can take their burden, and i do. I listen, and i cry along and i feel along... But on days like this, it simply feels unnecessary. Not that anyone cares. No one gives a shit. About what though? What is it that they should care about? If only i knew. 

Is it the small gestures? No one does things for me. Or maybe they do and i dont see it. 

When will this nightmare end?",-0.22480747871158613,1.9961521986301385,1.99537208441318,94.81308589411331,90.36986301369862,4.800592373195114,17.480932987782303,6.382479282647008,-0.2490373195112916,1070,28,244,12,37,359,140,292,0.156,0.6679999999999999,0.17600000000000002,0.6808,2,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,0,0,3,1,14,20,1,1,10,1,29,4,1,3,3,48,55,21,0,4,14,2,11,4,0,6,2,5,0,1,31,11,0,0,14,0,2,2,13,6,0,2,1,17,41,14,21,48,4,23,0,1,1,1,18,10,1,6,14,176,72,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246440606444647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671957107136214,0.0,0.1491360729378084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967697946269312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18477510281581616,0.0,0.0,0.07805639313305221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953580512282376,0.11687774964164338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585947698521152,0.0,0.10619955306944827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051515366794294,0.0,0.0,0.05985004176653879,0.0,0.0,0.1731721312271146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5039917134985986,0.19420511276593128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738514261113884,0.051498325015818885,0.07600316770737384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212915979179107,0.0,0.0607370086839472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045570002705755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992093793324711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800744317697324,0.1770787269163446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703723210840853,0.08178315020620998,0.0,0.060485901708524775,0.0,0.1820689475047086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332242100414758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122805499880057,0.1378328650294613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06282070494179286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21618093126951474,0.0,0.0,0.0722080476717924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301451180302044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06413742998234533,0.0,0.07236487987228618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540312115795781,0.0,0.06813084865431407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020026662201914,0.0,0.08902831461982907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192559532261518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40882759095212107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907276250148077,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marv9512,2020/01/27,"Don't know how to stop thinking about a terrifying memory. I posted this on r/offmychest, but now I think I might find better advice here. I've never been to see a therapist before. Even with serious emotional problems that happened over 10 years ago. I dealt with those problems by myself because I was too young and didn't know how to tell my parents I needed help. I know that it might be the right choice for me and that I need help, but I don't know how to even begin to ask for help.

​

A little over a year ago, everything in my life felt everything like it was going great. I was independent living on my own, had no financial problems, I was openly gay for the first time; everything in my life seemed like it was going extraordinarily better than ever before.

Until I broke up with my ex-boyfriend. He was severely depressed and not getting help and I had no idea how to help with his issues. So I broke up with him… over a text. That was a bad idea. He then showed up at my apartment with a gun and tried to kill himself. I met him outside my door were he held the gun at me for what felt like forever telling me to go inside. He put the gun under his chin and started counting to ten and if I didn't go inside before he was done he said he was going to do it. I didn't go inside and was able to get help and call the police. At that point he locked himself inside my apartment and the police tried to talk him out of killing himself for two hours. The police succeeded and they took him away. I met with the landlord later that day and she said, because of what happened, I had to move out within 30 days. They said it was my fault since I invited him to the apartment.

Luckily I found another apartment within those 30 days and moving was far more easy than I expected it to be. It was easy to afford and I was quickly approved. It was more room and It was even in a nicer area. But after everything happened and I moved on, I still couldn't stop thinking about what happened. I started replaying every single moment of that morning in my head in slow motion. It was beyond terrifying and for me the most horrifying moment of my entire life. Nothing like that had ever happened to me before. But I have no one I can really talk to about how I'm feeling, still after a year. I thought that once I moved out it would just go away. I guess I didn't prepare for how much seeing someone try to kill themselves after threatening me with a gun would stay with me.

I just can't stop thinking about him. Sometimes when my mind isn't preoccupied it's the only thing I can think about. I can still see the tip of the gun in front of me, him holding the gun under his chin. I just don't want to think about it anymore, but I don't know how.

I'm am an incredibly introverted person. Probably more accurately described as asocial. And I like being that way. Opening up to someone about my darkest memories is not something I can do easily. Still, I know going to the therapist is the right choice to make. So how does somone who's never done something start.",3.734831389183455,5.056213208130082,4.781854012018382,84.59172057264051,72.20325203252034,7.429126899964652,26.540296924708386,7.893859768569023,1.5073181336161188,2413,81,483,32,46,790,248,615,0.16399999999999998,0.7170000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.9859,3,0,2,6,1,0,59.0,0,0,2,5,35,21,3,0,27,0,53,5,1,10,4,98,108,38,3,11,11,1,3,5,0,4,3,3,3,1,31,32,0,5,21,1,0,16,18,12,0,4,40,9,77,9,89,60,7,100,0,3,3,1,43,42,0,6,44,347,108,1,0.056865036660210276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05556785569315539,0.10081484791859492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06161324346337645,0.06909724373058429,0.0,0.05962794909211444,0.0,0.0,0.05639483627576172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053161133061605664,0.0,0.10685314764961484,0.0,0.047479930357107465,0.0693287970917523,0.0,0.19355183155994324,0.0,0.0,0.10058500767553558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058065560322321776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001973295618146,0.0,0.048977772750284636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049762976788069735,0.11638535124485493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06396551241804947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11267646122140584,0.10287536248789772,0.04791124595514765,0.0,0.20442651308586526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028752671138578483,0.0,0.10919870564475724,0.0,0.051973613310431835,0.04836937113365741,0.0,0.06234957759237807,0.0,0.0,0.059419269274249426,0.0,0.2585416863142526,0.0,0.0,0.06269390366909648,0.06264324890214186,0.0,0.251427820594782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058359933176849385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286926124588649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05600060652096305,0.0,0.0,0.12838740950665178,0.0,0.059352324272916326,0.0,0.0,0.18873821342522445,0.0,0.18750922199560147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049637127609696,0.1389069227411453,0.056993705714682076,0.05021286918673258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03795785353493663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206496351785096,0.057417476627059136,0.0,0.0,0.2417541386291605,0.041802344920231715,0.08432940829856539,0.08771564378133104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054563536333991525,0.0,0.0,0.060559408169094976,0.038533220519674484,0.043248422816780235,0.0,0.0,0.06314189368778364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049652356624982526,0.0,0.0,0.0537558400480859,0.0,0.054460986172495535,0.0,0.06131012735221805,0.16323648087861362,0.0,0.05716506807202645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03642919859701306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712486120507594,0.16227501547868076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594221563121667,0.05176779367404055,0.0,0.06424130543687093,0.0,0.047039345952400655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636312205635472,0.08755496679072064,0.05624097529217035,0.0,0.12074809689250282,0.0606105629459037,0.1816499669296252,0.14262515068717307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141192491634424,0.09940509693794417,0.0,0.0,0.1320493808696436,0.03777860358624169,0.21862091629391306,0.0,0.045144487221973784,0.033158460173079815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317914806554051,0.1158228815197274,0.0,0.05554887800402985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03354047194448892,0.04513681925128957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079058101161278,0.0,0.06909724373058429,0.10985765764714144
mentalhealth,SegalResearchTrials,2020/01/27,"Clinical Trials for Mental Health Segal Trials is a clinical research company in pursuit of advancing medicine for schizophrenia, anxiety, depression, insomnia, and women's health issues. We are always looking for volunteers. If qualified, compensation is provided. For more details, visit [segaltrials.com](https://segaltrials.com) or call us at 305-722-8444.",13.080000000000005,17.1113196,11.705000000000002,33.407500000000034,53.0,14.6,48.5,13.023866798666859,8.8932,300,18,25,12,4,95,43,50,0.109,0.8909999999999999,0.0,-0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,0,0,4,4,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,7,4,1,4,0,1,1,0,5,2,0,2,0,17,2,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418323188405368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223356382839124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967717092841436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250324241346288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6178646593401379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033483294862629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440609248643495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928925897676317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3495991559286497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lekss777,2020/01/27,"Hello dear people, I wonder why my depression and anxiety came back ? I am taking meds for about 2 years and going to individual therapy. I recovered pretty well and was awesome, enjoying life, sometimes having anxiety and working to improve myself. But in the last 3 months everything came back even with panic attacks. First I fainted and since then my anxiety was so high with panic attacks, throwing up and then depressive episodes came. Now just high anxiety and depression. My dr gave me higher dose of lexapro but havent told me the reason this came again and suggested me group therapy too. So what do you think about group therapy and why this came back ? Nothing happened in my life strange too, but definitely will speak about this tomorrow with my therapist, but wondering what all of you think and you can tell me your experience. Thank you",6.7360645933014345,8.59470722368421,6.7227751196172285,71.47533492822967,65.57894736842105,10.79043062200957,35.52870813397129,10.832165505486646,4.43086052631579,686,33,110,20,11,218,93,152,0.136,0.75,0.114,0.2523,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,5,0,2,15,11,2,2,2,0,8,5,0,1,1,29,23,18,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,5,18,0,0,5,0,0,7,1,7,1,1,9,1,19,4,14,13,1,24,0,3,0,0,13,5,0,2,12,78,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911054963037062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164547139376596,0.0,0.2194538810619768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5440332151141606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245813367156553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283435384576244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549927633145528,0.09305818725363207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091995829911237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406619412448204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841256699473986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20102617000740047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775459744546429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13439029852056225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567115630575344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593413764858857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912825406102161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232358168470152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595314366780812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678431493372057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781241982013708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869488115459734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408882664130913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152806791440995,0.0,0.08315030886705509,0.08758555185240352,0.3263781335625848,0.11045657761260208,0.0,0.1219145850303547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090352026982887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553586210114149,0.0,0.1716852102593398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063350474117649,0.06925785183893221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0612624398959713
mentalhealth,TPrice3500,2020/01/27,"Do I have a mental disorder? I’m 17 and a senior in high school and for as long as I can remember I have been biting my nails heavily for a long time. I’m also known to lash out after someone jokingly insults me. While in elementary school I had a friend who would bring snacks to school and if he didn’t give me a snack I would block him on all social and not say anything until I got a snack. One time I lied to a friend (in elementary school) and told them I was related to a celebrity and when they didn’t believe me I ignored them for 2 weeks. I always smile when talking to people even though I don’t want to. When I found out my uncle died I chuckled even though I didn’t want to. Fast forward to now I’ll have days where I’m passionate and feel like I’m able to do anything i put my mind to, and have high confidence. But then some trigger happens and I’m back to feeling low, self conscious, and sad. As a kid I was always shy around girls, still am, but I’ve been able to fake confidence to have sex with multiple girls. I started smoking weed at 15, and the weed actually intensifies my dark thoughts. I have a hard time remembering anything. I started doing this ear massage thing as a kid that’d I catch myself doing subconsciously when I was angry or sleepy. When I listen to music I HAVE to close my eyes in order to imagine myself singing that song (not in public). I have a whole storyline in my dreams about me being a man who can mimic any voice and I’m a hit star. While in school I have to have certain songs playing in my earbuds at certain times or else I’ll feel uncomfortable. I often get jealous of other peers who succeed more with girls because I don’t. I’ve been masturbating since I was 12. Sometimes while in class I’ll start getting hot and sweaty and my head will itch and I’ll think everybody is judging me. I don’t even know who I am because I put on so many different personalities for other people that it’s all one blur. I’ve been wanting to get all of this off of my chest and I thought this would be a good first step at finding out wtf is wrong with me.",3.48753456221198,4.453639135944702,4.687972350230415,86.38767281105991,72.38709677419354,7.5354838709677425,27.13364055299539,7.831003766801068,1.438288479262673,1651,57,354,21,31,545,213,434,0.10400000000000001,0.797,0.098,-0.6858,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,3,2,19,18,2,0,16,0,42,10,5,1,5,63,72,39,1,7,7,0,5,1,2,4,1,6,0,8,14,24,3,2,14,6,0,6,8,7,0,3,17,12,53,11,54,47,6,59,0,2,1,2,27,25,0,6,30,231,67,8,0.17630820807775655,0.0,0.08602568915955898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704968051506904,0.14670255287676692,0.0,0.0,0.05994781367947191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21762994922263298,0.0784758423499869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778506457779597,0.0,0.10747584721057693,0.0,0.0,0.09931948767006407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056852104298007175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149004225423717,0.09210227607601462,0.10103224054196107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364144223691856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17467486294956894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13372009120954964,0.0629773095393975,0.0,0.0,0.08057125404528484,0.07498383586192495,0.0,0.09665642497869953,0.1362152842094549,0.0,0.13817064280154126,0.08456544928308878,0.0,0.07393948002467364,0.07050489003055269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795438306818064,0.0,0.07896876198817923,0.0,0.09047154320352006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18627930182647764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04844719015077906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04306764239760563,0.0,0.0,0.15602721605306072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937442516167808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883860280464036,0.0,0.0890105151690395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947100468577672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222299122074344,0.07697276338444574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723844577197342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997228305209845,0.0,0.0,0.0701036817783707,0.0,0.4460832980517229,0.0,0.0,0.09196395620826034,0.0,0.0,0.07292198582033556,0.0,0.0,0.08986200755954127,0.07469268628126133,0.0,0.08718666298905425,0.0,0.18718778569620445,0.0,0.0703999813587466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708549296083382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856566963783218,0.056485590361402126,0.17322191927072944,0.1399690233957891,0.20561346792638266,0.0,0.0,0.0842350241702829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598672366862876,0.0,0.07071190488640294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842090899485946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18786643873323766,0.09638267410342112,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alternative-flower,2020/01/27,"How to recover from backsliding? Hey all, first post here, and normal grammar/typo and on mobile warning.

When you’ve been in a long awaited and lovely reprieve from regular mental illness symptoms, how do you deal with backsliding into same old feelings? 

I’ve been aware of my anxiety and trying to get better for about the past four years (but was living with it unaware of it for most of my life).  Ever since I added a new medication onto my first one almost a year ago, I’ve felt the best I’ve ever been in years. Of course there are days where shit still hits the fan, but for the most part I am free of symptoms.

This morning I woke up feeling awful. I usually know it’s anxiety because I get almost debilitating physical symptoms. I have tightness in my chest that prevents me from taking deep breaths, I have a tight and clenched jaw, and I feel so nauseated sometimes that I grab a bucket because I’m so sure I’m gonna puke. I woke up feeling like that today, and it was more intense than I’ve felt in a while. It’s preventing me from getting work done and eating and drinking, so I need help knowing what to do when you backslide. 

I’ve been so good that I don’t even have a schedule for counselling anymore, so I don’t have easy access to professional advice right now. What are methods, for any emotional situation or anxiety specifically, that can ground me and stop me from freaking out about these feelings? I mostly feel scared and frustrated when this happens. I need help convincing myself that it’s not permanent and that I can go about my day.

Thanks.",5.952269736842108,6.546351529605262,6.331578947368424,78.16605263157895,66.59868421052633,9.031578947368422,33.10526315789474,8.99025400887824,2.807009210526316,1251,52,231,20,19,404,170,304,0.11800000000000001,0.7140000000000001,0.168,0.9596,0,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,2,0,5,21,13,2,1,11,1,20,13,4,2,4,50,46,26,0,3,4,0,11,1,0,1,6,0,0,0,18,16,2,5,10,1,1,1,3,4,0,4,11,11,28,10,35,33,8,40,0,0,0,1,7,14,1,6,25,159,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030841910590955,0.0935110498218684,0.0,0.2112671907949788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173722378545468,0.0,0.24210005523930764,0.0,0.10461832663651087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861217832063582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070587391421333,0.09329786096265248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606541684761164,0.10875617403494137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107953506884038,0.0,0.10334062494469066,0.0,0.10794321708740494,0.0,0.11866272363839582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967554480027002,0.1908445699351039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200352946648237,0.07536250399371372,0.20257503363543747,0.0,0.0,0.17946049683412232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16534344982506796,0.0,0.05995273764010381,0.08848050828793619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328498705756964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141624783155066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594974723200045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451112880285142,0.051537377444791366,0.0,0.0931501303460966,0.09335585926841514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520938294960084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627067889451808,0.10630971071370267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15643988288755506,0.0,0.10188347650242742,0.0,0.0,0.10335838786000363,0.0,0.0,0.1106946367383346,0.0,0.07148315904264158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423603720233826,0.10070271190610247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103083219322072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008839394791887,0.0,0.0,0.10561449116748793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828458248177747,0.08726291243319365,0.11857585156984556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433289840050597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424492750022726,0.08819486313847337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942363979520252,0.3289353675619176,0.07931580091808857,0.0,0.0,0.09712156914875432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999275182005236,0.0,0.0,0.07162119117644974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618298964200638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679841142982362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20379745860154808
mentalhealth,macr7,2020/01/27,Not loving someone/something in fear of losing it? Does anybody else feel like they tend to slightly antagonize people they love so as to distance themselves from the pain you might feel if you were to lose them? It’s clearly not normal but is it common? How can I work to get over that?,3.4305357142857105,5.601865267857144,3.738714285714289,88.20628571428574,74.89285714285714,5.194285714285715,25.485714285714288,5.6839178017228535,0.6851399999999996,229,8,43,1,5,71,47,56,0.203,0.6990000000000001,0.098,-0.6794,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,3,3,2,7,0,1,1,0,4,3,0,1,1,10,10,5,0,2,4,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,6,3,9,8,0,3,0,2,0,2,7,2,0,2,2,30,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20707066828226184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19766842710318916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26626702839480115,0.2392877280200381,0.1690437522909148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236259222379586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156022054047912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5294419546544058,0.0,0.0,0.42712358252973337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25101995697345963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23184062084842835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517839034146783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16404482148294933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821641977126688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722646004326206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway208080808,2020/01/27,I’m morbidly obese and have always eaten large amounts but since About two weeks ago I’ve had extreme anxiety attacks about gaining weight and have even been making myself throw up. Should I seek help? Should I seek help or is this just a stage. I haven’t eaten anything today but I’m still really anxious and I am wanting to go to the bathroom and make myself throw up. I almost can’t help it and it’s causing panic attacks. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I decided to put this in this sub because it’s mostly caused by my anxiety.,3.1121495327102764,5.393048672897198,4.353093457943924,82.91094859813086,76.28971962616822,6.522990654205607,26.58785046728972,7.554174236665415,1.6454418691588786,436,17,79,6,10,143,72,107,0.159,0.6809999999999999,0.16,0.2617,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,4,2,1,2,0,12,4,0,4,0,20,20,8,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,6,5,4,0,1,0,0,4,2,3,0,1,4,1,9,1,9,12,2,12,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,4,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585428696562593,0.1504518620388851,0.0,0.16995607633203808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122563195799806,0.0,0.0,0.11541950300613366,0.0,0.2596798572992643,0.1917420741553937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13967003986073018,0.0,0.0,0.3861756644295205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346339681822088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487107189782713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210242504755713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096459199522033,0.0,0.0,0.18712351881180156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34129128882638593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265868514900433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19913689641379528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17062151285415275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087308243708422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14039910457127447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13554340619514627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608804064372807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16579764394676352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010879472408717,0.0,0.13614396285148253,0.2066805486592896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056848370406135,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cdoer,2020/01/27,"I opened up to my mother about my attention issues and she refused to believe me. Now everyone is suffering the consequences. My therapist said I had depression and what sounded like ADD. I don’t know if I’d take the ADD label, but I most certainly have issues with focus and daytime sleepiness related to depression. I let my mom know about this, in no uncertain terms.

She said she didn’t believe me. I was “too smart” and “too talented” to have attention issues. I just wasn’t trying hard enough and I didn’t care enough, obviously.

When we went to the doctor to check up on how my first few weeks of lexapro were going, I intended to tell my doctor that the focus issues were still a problem. My mother talked over me, interrupted me, and didn’t let me talk at all. The doctor ended up doubling my lexapro dose and scheduled another appointment in March.  That day I texted my brother and told him that “Now I have to wait until March when I’m bombing my classes to get help”

I currently have a 53 in my calculus class and a 54 in my chemistry class. She was furious, and accused me of not trying. She said I didn’t care. I called bullshit, and told her she obviously wanted this. That I had made my issue clear, and that she had downplayed and ignored me. 

She’s threatening to not let me take a job that is extraordinarily good, with extremely good benefits and the ability to remotely work while I’m doing my college work. I guess the only good thing is she texted me and said that she called the doctors nurse and the nurse said she’d talk to him and he’d either call in some meds or meet with us.

It makes me so, so angry that this happened. It was so easily preventable, and I tried my hardest to prevent it. I told her every time I spaced out, every time I fell asleep during the day. Now she’s threatening to ruin a once in a lifetime job prospect for me because “if I don’t have time for school, I don’t have time for work”.",5.250546875000001,5.670337544270833,6.0145833333333325,80.43875,68.08854166666666,9.420833333333333,30.583333333333336,9.408791572840183,2.572752083333333,1523,56,303,29,24,500,175,384,0.145,0.725,0.13,-0.7965,3,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,2,0,0,4,15,18,1,1,16,0,31,6,1,4,5,58,56,30,0,4,8,4,1,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,16,26,0,5,4,0,1,3,11,8,0,1,23,7,67,10,38,28,9,40,0,4,0,0,41,15,0,7,23,214,83,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028572074742069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0466736868181092,0.0,0.0,0.17252645251039914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345461532080573,0.0,0.1561274898645379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875697209463936,0.0,0.13189169997396416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.313472595660402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781440693440488,0.15822549030179858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901966181911392,0.07316172403901237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512667101070445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04000237248306655,0.0,0.043514002127020966,0.19265880979215036,0.0,0.0,0.08434565442287938,0.0,0.06770671840891734,0.0,0.06858774991982311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05132031622873829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3995730362052559,0.15195911258430728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415691670276282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348805792558374,0.0,0.03740609086470818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244823397314035,0.05110814098887788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504713517778742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967272016637548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153987864620374,0.0,0.05823159860270265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326295089889433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641571549184722,0.0,0.0,0.07748848764974016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061145397170044365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11513562401685523,0.18462161759446705,0.06692172022637534,0.0,0.0,0.08889857758642945,0.0508667908914147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17858409785369694,0.0,0.0,0.21948517211703714,0.0,0.15594907528161442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09209900474861923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045160382090485986,0.0,0.061416316105207674,0.0,0.0,0.07097709000914951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16722203371445854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisismy3rdaccounttf,2020/01/27,"How do I kill myself? I cant find a good way off killing myself, I tried overdosing but just ended up being ill, I dont want to cause anyone else trauma. I just want to die, Painlessly.",2.34,3.48270505128205,4.305641025641027,87.34769230769234,75.41025641025641,7.2512820512820495,20.69230769230769,7.793537801064563,0.6893692307692305,143,3,31,2,3,49,29,39,0.479,0.465,0.055999999999999994,-0.9585,0,0,0,0,0,3,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,2,0,1,0,4,1,0,2,0,8,6,2,3,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,7,1,4,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17792141639018436,0.2607200440918296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26139620649021883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26408495389446424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982203102862456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125651753861532,0.0,0.22537231819231346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23256799740720185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21342545803002164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5630352985509703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17275878978617554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30016925494986,0.20197517536261567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unwantedcreature,2020/01/27,"I feel so wrong in this world. I usually never post on reddit, so apologies if I did a mistake somewhere. I just hope I'm able to get some sort of help here. And I hope that's the right subreddit for this.

​

I  \[17m\] am a guy living in germany (berlin) and every day it feels like I am at the wrong place at the wrong time.

My health has gotten worse about 5 years ago, and still counting. It all started with bullying and the usual stuff, followed by bad parenting. My mom is drug addicted and my dad vanished. I live with my grandma for around 3 years from now.

I have lost a lot of friends. With that being said, mostly all of the contacts I have made IRL. I feel very anxious to leave my house sometimes, sometimes I don't. I don't know if that depends on how I feel or... i don't know. I think that my family doesn't like me, because ""I haven't became the guy like they wanted"". I struggled a lot in school because of all the bullying shit, though I tried my best, i couldn't concentrate, never had motivation, or anything. Today, I blame myself for that, because I failed graduating. It feels shit to know you went to school for around 10 years, for basically, nothing. Though, do I have to blame myself for that? Is that my fault? Were some people, that tried to put me down because of how I look(ed) like, with success, the reason why I am like this right now?

After school finished, everything went worse, those were the times where most of the people disappeared and never heard anything from them since. I have tried to go to a ""professional school"", without success. The reason, people bullied me because i was quiet. A bit overweight. Problems with myself. Ending with leaving the school with death threats, such as stuff like if I'll come to school the next day, they'll stab me. Wow.

After that, I have been put into a measurement. Some people were okay, but some people were as shit  as in the last school. Caused me to leave there after 2 months as well.

Honestly, I don't know if it's just me or the people living here. Some of them here act so childish while they are adult. It feels like I am the outsider, because the way they behave, *kinda* disgusts me.

We come to a point where I thought it's been a good idea to move out to an own single apartment, with supervisor support of course, because i'm still not fully an adult. It was good at first, until some strange stuff happened, causing me to think paranoid, like that someone was in my apartment, knocking at my door at 2am or something. On some days I wasn't able to sleep because of that, but at those times I tried to find some people online. It kinda worked, but they are not from my country. Basically when I tried to get contact with someone living in germany, the contact stopped fast, just because no one decided to write anything. I decided to move back because of me feeling paranoid in this apartment caused me to feel even more bad as I already felt.

I have a lot of disputes (?) with my grandma because sometimes she tries to talk bad about me and that makes me aggressive. She knows I have problems with aggression but she doesn't look like she care. She calls me the bad guy when I start to get loud, just because she keeps talking stuff like I am my own fault for having no graduation, being in my room for too long or whatever. I can argue back, but in her eyes I would be an ungrateful child then. *ugh*

Now I'm here, sitting in my cold room, writing this, because my life gets worse day by day.

The people I called a ""friend"", are gone. I get disregarded by my own family. I have thoughts about wanting to die. Loneliness. Hopeless.

I really wonder how it would be if you know someone in your area who can understand you and have fun with. A person you can trust. Someone in your life that accepts you who you are. 

Sometimes, it feels like I have been born at the wrong country. Which may sounds stupid. I keep thinking about how my life would be by now if I would live in a country such as the UK, US or somewhere else. Or, is it just me? Someone who thinks this world gets worse each year, people are becoming strange and so many people watch people fighting in public without stopping it. It's... weird.

In fact, I currently live a life I never wanted to become as. I don't know if it might be all over soon. I fear of the future more and more. Why, of all, do I have to be one of the people who suffer from all this? Is it myself? I have so many questions but I don't know if I ever can get an answer to them all.

I just don't know what can happen in the future. And that scares me the most... basically.

I am sorry if the text is too big.",2.9887053521442186,4.833273201965072,3.6369432314410486,89.90412103907741,75.16812227074236,6.138483932370392,25.06236703616616,6.844919456158928,0.8820871570932698,3607,122,737,33,78,1137,335,916,0.17800000000000002,0.738,0.084,-0.998,3,0,2,0,2,1,154.0,2,8,8,8,48,61,10,3,45,1,75,13,5,13,13,162,139,56,2,22,32,3,10,11,2,7,8,5,3,7,48,31,1,5,37,0,0,13,22,32,1,3,24,19,121,29,117,100,31,117,0,4,3,0,58,47,3,40,65,523,169,15,0.07646435555321969,0.0,0.0,0.041678717057897406,0.0,0.0,0.03389051880135861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04219015887981488,0.0,0.0,0.04142454864772161,0.04645628071897335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043191478530823134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438547415245392,0.06806948782715083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05879636955743599,0.1276890859373465,0.30297774928689897,0.08444887320921937,0.0,0.0,0.04012231183862799,0.0,0.04173963608482845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807865624730473,0.0,0.03898025328433218,0.11782493434392285,0.0,0.06586727169234925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328295898380233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03967896444969698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0443371883077588,0.0,0.03193807868645704,0.0,0.03386236159850399,0.0,0.0,0.025251992845194585,0.0345831936324293,0.03221225871710025,0.0,0.034360616160562754,0.0,0.07208378926220285,0.04302182917681064,0.1739820404903648,0.08193922632828121,0.036708886271652766,0.0,0.03494351785352138,0.032520270885867265,0.0,0.0,0.0590761714223825,0.0,0.13982314439333274,0.0,0.021728227691329986,0.06413467361126356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356760055981348,0.06761717708829998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040639017159303584,0.0,0.0,0.025626222863941936,0.0,0.0,0.07594635820557474,0.0,0.04411480000376067,0.0,0.043159475073119284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796503254061716,0.0,0.0,0.18910264543377667,0.0311643276687303,0.0,0.12144706792425433,0.0,0.0,0.10801807129377106,0.2054614196773404,0.0,0.20255828053628294,0.03383427423582737,0.06421080062465699,0.0,0.04173493835292942,0.09751089105017488,0.0,0.036176211027613696,0.02552027554361291,0.07752285497579581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0405582988400279,0.0,0.04477706453633702,0.03051655954503772,0.08126950890342632,0.0,0.0,0.11794804976127593,0.0,0.040660354800024834,0.0,0.0,0.036684805704193864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05181422623593741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04245230894772832,0.0,0.0,0.3180645382821709,0.033382862950693544,0.03994448847231909,0.0,0.03614176573084836,0.0,0.03661585795992768,0.0,0.0,0.07316606152764771,0.0,0.07686779692770314,0.04282878895473116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024492512074558805,0.07861809262914367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530014184830896,0.03636755614617235,0.0,0.03827707961172536,0.27085103519940085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773434322959744,0.03162605253723553,0.0,0.03825978859816538,0.0,0.16197000081007612,0.02943299830764257,0.1512504056612862,0.04279779290641777,0.054121864420447065,0.0,0.06106453311783595,0.06392762508968612,0.0,0.03996857330787187,0.17506678634330172,0.0,0.043385422269092325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06145915257536845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799054308629623,0.07512584110030003,0.060704157157858436,0.06688047094971153,0.0,0.0362396341610162,0.0,0.0,0.15574283450554496,0.0,0.0,0.03980104539561783,0.0459886024613724,0.0,0.0842146848390884,0.03154555066327063,0.06765098704264268,0.03034692315767914,0.0,0.0,0.03437531932113985,0.0708832236614318,0.06899718761708817,0.0,0.0,0.07370891011641269,0.04146116592321862,0.027833480764411632,0.0,0.15584742168276414,0.10863616863093947,0.1672035384436282,0.04645628071897335,0.09848107598780126
mentalhealth,TheRetroRaider279,2020/01/27,"Why do I still feel unhealthy physically and mentally? I’ve been trying so hard to improve my health mentally and physically but I feel like nothing has worked. Physically I’m actually in decent shape. My BMI is healthy and I am slim with a small amount of tone. I’m a 20 year old male. Since I was 15 I have struggled with Anxiety very badly. I suspect I have OCD and some ADD that triggers really bad anxiety for me but I have yet to be officially diagnosed by a Psychiatrist. In the last year I have tried many ways to improve my health but ultimately nothing has really worked. Here are some of the things I have done to improve my health:

I do not smoke
I do not drink alcohol
I do not take any drugs at all (I also avoid caffeine)
I switched to a vegetarian diet and later a vegan diet
I significantly reduced my sugar intake
I take vitamin D supplements 
I go to the gym almost every day
(Also other things that escape my mind right now)

Like seriously, I just don’t even know what more I can do. As far as I can tell I should be super healthy but still I struggle with feelings of hopelessness and anxiety. I just feel hopeless that even after all of this effort it hasn’t really made me feel any better. In the past, I have had therapy when I was 16, 18 and 19. I’m not currently receiving any therapy. I also do not take any medication because I wanted to avoid that. In the past I had Prozac 20mg but I didn’t really feel like it was doing anything for me after a few months so I stopped it. My goal is to see a psychiatrist so I can be officially diagnosed and then start some medication that’s right for me and also some therapy. I decided I don’t want to abandon my current lifestyle, even if it hasn’t done much as far as I can tell.

What do you think?",2.8635661080074466,4.5986765670391065,5.14891620111732,79.40199627560523,75.2290502793296,8.79567970204842,27.0171322160149,9.3871,2.464890204841714,1393,54,280,36,30,488,168,358,0.146,0.7390000000000001,0.115,-0.8882,2,2,4,0,0,2,27.0,0,1,0,6,18,15,0,4,12,0,41,15,0,2,2,53,61,28,0,4,13,0,7,3,0,1,11,0,0,1,15,13,5,4,10,2,0,2,10,10,0,0,10,9,48,5,31,47,10,35,0,3,1,0,5,11,0,6,24,195,63,3,0.0,0.0,0.08167339031760815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944356370352001,0.0838075738669748,0.0,0.0,0.2677206373801853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276594925615524,0.0,0.19207732337726702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887313143051711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397621923867321,0.05101916011776401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402064982107083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0539757850250544,0.0,0.0,0.16989554472232268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17129629013078193,0.0,0.08198837714386213,0.09705861071315497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16583753527267875,0.0,0.07051590771414228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539095776938662,0.11958219535152652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0475652984203904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497349435697245,0.0,0.0,0.26688881479251314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04599610081166417,0.0682218801593961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266616176970065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919340213532793,0.0,0.0848527036743941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16862604624660082,0.16868798037006155,0.0,0.08450720498487914,0.0,0.06680384991098573,0.0,0.06152480984087402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061353513064314,0.0,0.08782290246031338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597910197966423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144663913580511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294864625097822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06669337953821927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923264281664357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05923913051715862,0.0,0.13367646832100608,0.06997203379618196,0.0,0.17499053708690293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18878269226512465,0.0,0.14630470367131648,0.0,0.2871345685078422,0.0,0.11120531186145706,0.0536278141329449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364563039579535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905641603400227,0.09872992351484633,0.066432498620752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552092756474564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12186063561601042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779254145035574
mentalhealth,hkjake,2020/01/27,"Imposter After Almost Ending It Over the weekend I came the closest I ever have to finally ending it all. I won't go into the details leading up to or how, because that isn't important for this post. I'm at work now on Monday, and after having been at such an emotional extreme and despair, I find myself having to care about powerpoint slides and copying data into software. How the fuck do I do that while feeling like I don't even know if I want to be alive? It's suddenly as if I've brought in something super dark to work and no one around me knows. I don't really know how else to explain it or put it into words. I don't feel like someone that's supposed to be here anymore.",4.441631205673758,4.829224510638298,5.918581560283692,80.53333333333335,69.85106382978725,7.9687943262411345,31.26950354609929,7.793537801064563,2.1796439716312057,540,22,104,6,9,184,90,141,0.069,0.795,0.13699999999999998,0.818,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,4,10,6,1,0,5,0,13,1,0,4,2,29,26,13,0,3,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,9,0,0,7,1,0,6,6,2,0,1,3,2,11,4,22,20,1,29,0,1,0,1,1,11,1,5,13,80,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879688175944048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186162206091468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16710557934447887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442893236854275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21469522169160615,0.1913873018881359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15681126191524472,0.21115339084038226,0.33251841513831426,0.0,0.0,0.12398356528593557,0.1697983866781588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18982804255363367,0.2682063544906785,0.0,0.20563190743778406,0.17156752552845655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17353890226594995,0.0,0.0,0.10668239742624264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3094887115063665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341551025999103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720010932693734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797784691175036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18870478019689305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202546265725915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15904976920362632,0.14451168625017538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11071879382720504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27331658143931103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samantharay2,2020/01/27,"How do I know if a therapist is good or bad? **TLDR**: How do you know if a therapist is good or bad? 

I've been seeing an LMHC therapist every week since October, and I'm frustrated.  I already feel like my issues are pathetic (like I generally feel down, I'm afraid to do simple things that I have to do or could help me progress in my career), but when I mention these concerns, I feel like my therapist overlooks them for more my less boring or easier-to-solve issues. (I would give more details, but I would like to keep this confidential, because I do think my therapist is a good person.  However, you can ask me questions, and I'll try to answer.) 

My therapist also said that my issues are mild compared to others she's treated, but her saying that just makes me feel insignificant or like I'm not trying hard enough.   

Sometimes it also feels like we're just chatting about things that are irrelevant to my concerns.  A couple sessions ago, my therapist showed me a 2 minute video that I was not enthusiastic about.  I was shocked when she put it on.  In my last session, she asked if I wanted to see another video, and I said, ""Nah, I don't think I'll like it.""  I guess she might be trying to build a rapport or lighten my tension, but now I think it's a red flag. 

Also, she's always happy, but I'm not, and I don't like to make people sad or bore them with my issues, so I feel bad whenever I say something negative in her office. 

What do you think?  Do you think I should try harder to communicate to her?  Should I confront her?  Should I confront myself?   Am I not trying hard enough?  Am I lazy?  Am I being too impatient?  Am I too sensitive?  Should I give up therapy altogether?  Do I ghost her?  Should I look for another therapist?  A psychologist?  A psychiatrist?  You can be honest. 

(I'm a girl in my early 20s if that's relevant.  I would give more details, but I feel like it's inappropriate to give my life story, and I don't want to bore you.) 

Any input is appreciated.  Thank you!  I hope you have a great day!  :)  

**TLDR**: How do you know if a therapist is good or bad?",1.3628460508701463,3.6885784144578366,3.6452208835341366,85.35396251673363,82.92771084337348,6.869611780455152,22.475234270415,8.021203637495839,1.3479435073627846,1602,55,327,33,45,550,178,415,0.14,0.691,0.168,0.9377,2,0,1,0,0,0,76.0,0,9,2,1,16,33,3,2,13,0,44,1,0,5,0,69,83,33,1,17,25,0,9,9,0,9,1,4,0,2,17,6,0,1,17,4,0,1,8,14,0,0,5,17,73,19,25,65,6,16,0,1,4,0,37,7,0,17,17,221,90,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05192337209277264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06463917920554241,0.14052767587631382,0.048739250799680126,0.0,0.0,0.03983313812228826,0.12284238886473392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951979196794563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956313492918579,0.035706892411781564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046767523252928565,0.06481233409452794,0.0,0.03777615202371808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104765970224643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04935212426578744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073216338880016,0.16738451099256307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247626403643224,0.0,0.1965203626114255,0.0,0.06457935423931767,0.06452717608565957,0.0,0.0,0.062354379415573064,0.1049437305733936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03926171543421264,0.0,0.0,0.058178380793051925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445491219929809,0.0,0.05206432062294654,0.0,0.0,0.0965741783627502,0.04774659812819696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0413733892759505,0.25755191367910274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04918840742377845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819878891366971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06213902048723476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04060866174091299,0.051145596934367606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05888424495981474,0.06561761884536826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143683936799502,0.09316268493424668,0.0,0.0,0.09335368603687152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0484540028242538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04509404331905379,0.057932361100495586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053928165524299305,0.06698583513688636,0.6120927969604268,0.07782950752403897,0.18766308432989595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988435466325353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06909832989470513,0.0,0.046985484563129634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483040403466772,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cote112,2020/01/27,"Denial of OCD My mom moves things all the time. We'll put something in one place and she'll have guaranteed move it before we come back. 

We bought some plants to put on a windowsill but the sun only hits half of it so we put the plants on that half. Mom of course moved the plants so they were evenly spaced on the windowsill.

So we said, ""We know it's your OCD kicking in but the reason we had them that way was because of how the sun hits them.""
She replied, ""Ok, but I'm not OCD"" as she's adjusting the curtains ""I just like this to be a certain way""

This is the only window that gets sun.Any advice on how to deal with this situation and the larger one of denial she is in?",1.820291375291376,3.30321288811189,2.8379195804195803,95.94098193473197,77.46153846153845,5.605827505827506,19.608974358974358,5.985473137389443,-0.2915543123543123,525,11,123,3,12,167,80,143,0.0,0.958,0.042,0.7096,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,7,1,3,0,8,3,0,0,12,1,9,0,0,3,2,23,17,11,0,0,5,2,0,1,0,2,0,1,2,0,10,10,0,0,3,0,1,7,1,0,0,4,5,1,17,3,17,7,2,20,0,0,0,0,19,9,0,1,3,83,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14855518267260776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338089938315194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689635552459254,0.0,0.09267185127053612,0.0,0.12936043390255775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095441210298356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15672910787331734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040980269888146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942577854768894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354790246652813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742707920789624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3560951599417449,0.0,0.4847293877628105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060295306291337,0.2312407873834996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588317496762065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4584755174012217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15630503338584864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14460875067024914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708802980315398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703478497814092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099737135549497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864587353081912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24133767069085346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,backenforth,2020/01/27,"my journey so far... it really can get better. TW: SI/attempt TW: suicide, suicide attempt
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i’ve been debating about sharing this for awhile- but i finally feel comfortable sharing what my life has been like the past few months. so people know that they don’t struggle alone. that you never know what’s hiding behind a persons smile, or their laughter. for me, specifically, my incessant laughter. 

i live with bipolar 1, schizoaffective disorder, ptsd and borderline personality disorder. i am more than my diagnoses. i am very open about my mental health and the fact that i am actively in weekly psychotherapy- even up to three times a week, during acute incidents, and have been continuously utilizing this truly invaluable resource for the past 4 years. 
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[10.21.2019](https://imgur.com/gallery/ufi7BHT)
the first picture was me on october 21, 2019. sitting in the waiting room at my old therapists office. not knowing that 30 minutes later i would be trying to take my own life. and i came really close to doing just that.

i spent 2 months in a locked psychiatric ward, undergoing major medication changes, 1:1 24/7 staffing for one month, hours of daily dbt, intensive individual therapy, electroconvulsive therapy and symptom management.

i missed my grandpa’s funeral. i refused to talk to anyone at all for the first week and a half- literally only answered the the incessant phone calls when the nurses told me that my mom was on the phone and there was a family emergency. i knew in my gut that somebody had left, and i wouldn’t get to say goodbye. it hurts my heart.
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[01.24.2020](https://imgur.com/gallery/YVfdkqS)
the second picture is me from friday, january 24, 2020. just... wow. wow.

look at my fucking eyes. really, take a good look.

there is NO LIFE in them in that first picture.

and the picture from friday... there is life back in my eyes. i still have my hard days. but i WANT to have them. because they are a day. and a day is enough.

i shouldn’t even be alive today. i don’t believe in god, but something (or someone... dad, was that the sign from you that i’ve been desperately waiting for the past 5 years?) saved me on that fateful monday afternoon. i should be dead. but i’m still here. so there has to be a reason.

i live my life with intention, now. truly and constantly nourishing my soul, my mind, my heart and my body. i avoid negativity at all costs. i don’t lie, i don’t tell white lies, i don’t exaggerate, i don’t like to talk just to hear my own voice. anything that comes out of my mouth is something i mean with every ounce of me. i no longer say things i don’t mean. i don’t try to appease everyone anymore. i’ve had to cut people out of my life that i’ve loved deeply over the years- but they are so detrimental to my recovery. and for once in my life, i need to be selfish and put ME first.

i’ve gotten back into art and have been using it as a therapeutic release. i can’t believe i haven’t created in 5 years now... insane. it feels so good to enjoy things i used to be so passionate about. but good is still a foreign feeling for me. i’ve lost 75lbs, exercise 7 days a week, eat clean, am med compliant and continue to abstain from alcohol.

i don’t know why i’m still here. but i am so, so, so happy for it. 🖤🖤🖤 thank you to everyone who has reached out to me, supported me, and just would be willing to listen to my extremely disorganized thoughts that i wasn’t even sure what i was trying to convey. for more years than i would like to admit. for not giving up on me, even when i was giving up on myself. for helping me save me from myself. you all know who you are... and you’ve all left an imprint on my heart.

i’m not 100% yet- nowhere near it, really, and in all honesty- i don’t think 100% is attainable for anyone, in any setting, whatsoever. nobody is perfect. relapses happen. but radical changes cannot happen overnight. you need to bust your ass every day, sometimes every hour, or sometimes even more often than that. but even just showing up and taking accountability for your shit, it surely must count for something.

[my daily mantra](https://imgur.com/gallery/5fWIz41)

IN CLOSING- Thank you for coming to my TED talk. 😂😂😂

also— is there a different way to get direct links to images other than imgur? or a way to disable people from commenting on imgur uploads?",3.1671672771672803,5.668260735042736,4.144297924297927,83.3590354090354,77.1807081807082,7.414407814407816,26.47252747252747,8.401726058763845,2.040510622710624,3398,134,633,69,81,1096,359,819,0.106,0.722,0.171,0.9964,1,2,4,0,0,3,195.0,0,9,6,9,42,33,3,2,30,0,68,28,10,4,11,104,119,45,4,10,21,3,4,3,0,8,14,5,2,2,32,33,2,5,17,3,3,5,23,9,0,8,21,14,96,24,100,83,13,98,1,3,5,4,43,41,3,5,51,425,128,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05958708449928034,0.0,0.057747250773822686,0.0,0.04458870929677213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03791654999708671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05529578373967002,0.0779729307611732,0.0,0.045883112572344384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574710677062987,0.0,0.033988840327254036,0.0,0.0,0.12563768680746978,0.0,0.049312376798848485,0.0,0.06193325822134636,0.0,0.0,0.056933947828231385,0.06377094899040121,0.0,0.0,0.11796664622785655,0.096059127817011,0.0,0.06025331510510616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797926832311766,0.0,0.0,0.05659199924645832,0.0,0.058254010302256215,0.1278042939250259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05705314718871001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057611700426917115,0.0,0.22096112494356254,0.0,0.14093257840555012,0.1065560629962402,0.0,0.0,0.05256256824037176,0.0,0.08457697141502406,0.0,0.0,0.06107887160549005,0.0,0.18970689250711412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05154628219974393,0.08739191247116718,0.10697404588972767,0.0,0.14029852728761746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861114464992976,0.05935417233233225,0.049947159510141705,0.0,0.0,0.059266893001075724,0.06284198910882978,0.19821630264148726,0.037372621550993086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098184738876326,0.0,0.059688829652113876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321245219985508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115989746824607,0.0,0.27567883924940273,0.08171989849154332,0.0,0.09846858822041687,0.0,0.09364337319520367,0.0,0.060865156164420064,0.0,0.05032270749139689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147104663091632,0.06193325822134636,0.05616913084870928,0.056189761029882934,0.0,0.05629849433239685,0.06530171441830276,0.13351368677743636,0.0,0.0,0.08268595197918804,0.04300309735275403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05850740392255638,0.05937919424300076,0.03778226464263559,0.04240557457183945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15967858286164174,0.11596427691590006,0.09736941023020716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517673954601501,0.05605100484940798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14287698806890214,0.057327297871590126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868012332665491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05723357510827533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04724257316443148,0.12877297361020534,0.1102898425613692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17810987585003135,0.0,0.0,0.058289135004363536,0.0,0.12197782409651173,0.06327217927907305,0.1051002871385579,0.057952685518246325,0.12576657022847268,0.13444566112448164,0.04873391879376682,0.10266677850365652,0.12752556724338013,0.06473796618382421,0.0740847081699707,0.035726719284617785,0.0,0.04426468746638525,0.03251225048168325,0.0,0.052850946463585236,0.05327803149812009,0.0,0.11356566365940325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963119819955747,0.0,0.046005216329205935,0.032886817404700015,0.08851433786637658,0.1788990331724242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05031185818110946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11882413685826655,0.0,0.0,0.17952782206568518
mentalhealth,Pepsiposh,2020/01/27,"I think I need to go to some kind of hospital or retreat, any advice. Sorry if this isn’t the right sub for this. I just feel aimless. I fucked up my HSC, I could reapply next year but they’ll only stop considering my ATAR for about two more years so that’s 1-3 years doing fuck all. I hate where I’m working, I hate where I live (rural town) my friends are all busy with their own lives and friends too hang out, and I just feel like there’s no point in being here anymore. I’m not getting any kind of mental health help at the moment, though I was a few months ago, but I really doubt seeing a psychiatrist once a week/fortnight is going to do much. I just don’t want to live anymore, the fact that I’m closeted transgender and won’t be able to transition until I can move away doesn’t help anything either. Is there some kind of retreat/program I can go to to try and stop myself from considering what I’m considering? I want to live in some ways, but I just see no point to it at the same time. Any advice?",2.356709211986683,3.7373966132075513,3.689567147613765,90.82169256381799,75.79245283018868,6.686348501664817,22.376248612652613,7.285733465282438,0.5707427302996669,790,21,178,9,17,259,126,212,0.156,0.7390000000000001,0.105,-0.9186,0,0,0,0,0,3,23.0,0,0,2,1,13,11,4,1,7,0,16,3,0,0,3,34,36,12,0,5,11,0,2,1,2,2,1,0,1,0,6,6,0,2,3,0,0,5,7,5,0,1,1,4,22,6,25,30,11,30,0,0,2,2,6,13,2,6,12,111,28,1,0.10924188537089223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213499812132734,0.09683634010310296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228646843482276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21667719223533924,0.0,0.0,0.08989676364837525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026363473289202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722075637554251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047195918983294,0.07804242473652619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16880001930267616,0.2019847254502014,0.05707437631374712,0.0,0.18625404280954302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21570749077274415,0.0,0.11611901576839825,0.0,0.0,0.1464450660879888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3412758390586448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0533700671714487,0.0,0.3858503447464665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009012648820786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719583067466645,0.11610683581316047,0.08030535528003589,0.08100147380361315,0.0,0.0,0.11617998441411274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633904265055095,0.0,0.08308337645244941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20653778354663607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998314906693763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329197321922106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17410327809204618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228734690782887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826622153957801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699977891516664,0.1073295977255545,0.0,0.06369982185973826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416806934114974,0.0,0.10671344854058634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886738870281195,0.08671112381619668,0.08762725107558313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952939361458489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21104457762886053
mentalhealth,iman00700,2020/01/27,"Why did I abandoned my family during earthquake? Hi
First earthquake wasn't bad and nothing. 

Earthquake started and I saw my younger brother crying and my mom holding him(my dad wasn't home) as soon as i saw them sitting on the ground I ran from apartment and was going to go out but earthquake ended so I returned home. I'm shocked how easily I abandoned my family to save myself rather than helping them to run.

Why did I do that? Does this mean I love myself more than my family or anyone?

I'm not married and never been in a relationship so I dont know how I'll react to that, am I going to do the same thing after marriage  too?",2.375364583333333,4.485429140625001,3.8731250000000017,86.29270833333338,77.90625,5.8291666666666675,25.510416666666664,6.816661863887847,1.137060416666666,502,19,96,5,12,166,79,128,0.083,0.773,0.14300000000000002,0.8716,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,1,7,6,0,0,3,0,10,1,0,3,1,21,22,13,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,6,0,3,2,0,0,5,5,4,0,1,9,2,19,2,14,13,2,18,0,2,2,1,10,5,0,1,7,69,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368066078444598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14768986219968824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942975981566405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547914482856045,0.0,0.20730548229594806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566657786458894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5002484664126967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504565340278785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015799444426029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185609027017751,0.0,0.3548560116271925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972102351085119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964375467845274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19267737106748625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20716315548920244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642302384803812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16972394655352696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899060754449799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12519865170259115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11751316220946105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31921867265410075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snobtimism,2020/01/27,"Anxious Hello, I’ve never posted here before, but I think I need help or support. I just called off work because I’m so anxious that I got sick trying to get ready, and I feel... scared? This happens to me too often to be a fluke. Most days I push through it, but I don’t want to feel like I need to push through my days anymore. 

I think I need to see a doctor, but I don’t know what kind of doctor to see or how to see if my insurance will cover it (I’m young and new to the world of benefits) and I have no ideas what steps to take.

Would anybody be able to give me some advice? Or even get me pointed in the right direction to start? I want to get better",1.0956759906759892,2.39862042657343,2.9204370629370646,95.34937354312358,79.0,5.605827505827506,21.00757575757576,5.985473137389443,-0.06442144522144533,503,13,121,3,12,168,84,143,0.10800000000000001,0.75,0.141,0.5948,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,9,6,0,1,4,0,7,3,0,1,1,28,31,12,0,7,8,0,2,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,6,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,1,5,18,5,19,26,2,15,0,0,3,0,4,5,0,7,7,75,24,3,0.14205963559356893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13881903176559895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209739051061854,0.14088498594602097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659823530797313,0.0,0.12088228670356625,0.0,0.0,0.12564020332867645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450587711604744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18323342531484574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29080811322438743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382904951321996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14365924034113098,0.101487432052903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22266088890721925,0.13627654707560558,0.0,0.0,0.11361806797886224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562286659624175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521957924976948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603680370268649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14793324974499994,0.07807226054179735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694031622416549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3160062592845743,0.10956514866849916,0.13720208128588895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342922733680521,0.0,0.13605386198835706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213181525962462,0.0,0.0,0.14222647773296426,0.0,0.339609411135155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055054125005976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612075909887361,0.0,0.0,0.10681116642657656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820521567433652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964491675286456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675809074226595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342110663421226,0.0,0.0,0.10091508923560748,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garbothrowaway917,2020/01/27,"I’m losing hope in life, Made a throwaway for this as I don’t want any of this to come back to me. So I’m not sure what to do or where to turn right now, I’m in one of the hardest times of my life. I just turned 18, I am not on nor have I ever been on any type of medications or therapy plans. I’m extremely depressed and have constant anxiety about everything around me and the future mainly to the point where it literally feels crippling, I have constant anxiety attacks and plenty of other health issues. Yet, even with how depressed I am, I’ve been emotionally just numb for so long that I can’t really cry anymore, tears just don’t come. I’ve also been struggling with thoughts of gender dysphoria for about 8 years. I am terrified of not getting support from family and friends which is why I’ve hidden it for so long. I am constantly stressed about schooling and self esteem issues. I hate myself and everything about myself, nothing makes me happy anymore, and suicide has been a constant thought that runs through my head. I’m sure there’s some things that constantly mess with me that I haven’t talked about but you get the gist. This is sort of a last ditch effort to seek help when I don’t know where or how to start, where to go, etc.
Any advice helps, thank you.",6.387848739495799,5.932792639215688,6.413963585434175,81.51926470588236,65.74509803921569,9.638655462184877,31.939775910364148,9.04235418022936,2.447212885154062,1013,35,206,15,14,322,139,255,0.14400000000000002,0.795,0.061,-0.8995,0,0,0,0,0,1,24.0,0,2,0,3,26,16,2,2,7,0,20,6,1,4,3,38,44,20,1,2,10,0,1,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,13,13,0,0,4,0,0,4,9,9,0,1,7,1,22,7,36,37,3,32,0,3,0,0,7,11,0,6,17,137,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350609427652233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652238584417266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19521521801262204,0.0,0.1464035067322158,0.0,0.18979537042527825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851834161124868,0.0,0.10885994792805476,0.0,0.07357886438976398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16485504421632016,0.0,0.5170285818519118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510977317809166,0.0,0.0,0.1648334339741784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763714309287137,0.0,0.0,0.10671842760001377,0.06320162183866944,0.0865560963576075,0.0,0.0,0.1719980424544451,0.0,0.09020698717873764,0.0,0.048383187449806984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392901361890629,0.0,0.09998701093093294,0.0,0.05438221205710789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186262280987453,0.0,0.09447298696360684,0.09820442674159537,0.10171283550344724,0.0,0.0,0.1282765171469256,0.0,0.0,0.0950406773983837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997487201824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052588121828491256,0.07799923214972294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351758123705968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936334637410833,0.0,0.10705141273977588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09054315922468832,0.06387308970083934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639650869301812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181608879565076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648412810922002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904569482617109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06130076527048781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171780533142499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684228435370652,0.0,0.0,0.0998244009169283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772910219946791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961132180045728,0.10003482383038784,0.0,0.10466813535485764,0.10858663980985424,0.18037132833832173,0.0,0.0,0.0769111203105046,0.0,0.08809749106825739,0.1094286066529107,0.0,0.06357145915575796,0.0,0.0,0.15193261016055715,0.05579697226629207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081641101563481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05643979765997595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863443567887905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06162052002195475
mentalhealth,throwaway_314277,2020/01/27,"Struggling with invasive violent, sexual, paranoid and other thoughts which I can’t control These thoughts are making my life hard, I’ve been having them ever since I was 14. They pop into my mind more than 30 times a day, the thoughts can go from sexually abusing a stranger, to killing a pet in front of its owner, to deeply insulting someone or just screaming and shouting in public. Another invasive thought is ruining my relationship, I constantly feel like my gf is cheating on me, and hates me. I need help but I don’t know what to do or where to go. Im having a hard time controlling them. I’ve told no one. Does anyone know if there is a name for this, I googled it and I read the vast majority of people deal with these thoughts, but I doubt to the severity I do, so there must be a name for this. I’m sorry if this is incoherent I’m really tired. Thank you for any help.",3.884855769230773,5.165685221590913,5.043409090909094,83.0173251748252,71.7840909090909,8.824475524475526,30.015734265734267,9.265573868473778,2.536585314685315,693,29,142,15,13,229,114,176,0.19399999999999998,0.745,0.06,-0.9525,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,3,2,6,11,5,2,9,0,16,2,0,3,2,32,33,11,1,4,7,0,3,1,1,1,2,2,1,0,10,7,0,2,8,1,0,3,3,9,0,1,8,5,19,2,18,23,2,14,0,1,0,0,15,6,0,5,6,91,29,1,0.0,0.15856516183473404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100812593889454,0.1403310926961701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357616005521048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446213141686868,0.3002006019407371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630845981320504,0.13797154477019385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171144239372722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105574859818935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766782725626146,0.09560727182644303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521159032819544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397685118154625,0.13212816474458813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17940515416306346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455799409115594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14806166194854287,0.0,0.14709754074442544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452719015471607,0.06538195778363698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933171682175584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351288675464034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923230794570596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068581131769148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277999113655254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338649464788989,0.0,0.08573411165403795,0.0,0.0,0.14368197257829615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511883726582291,0.0,0.1107045088372244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339264908216502,0.0,0.0,0.14981030710184146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990684647611482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12321151460930994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5312253161081529,0.1560732179811326,0.15381643873553968,0.0,0.1278790871197367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jviehmey22,2020/01/27,"I am so tired Hey Everyone! So over the past few weeks I have been tired to the point that I can barely get out of bed, and by tired I mean mentally and physically tired. It does not matter how much sleep I get, if I sleep 8 hours or 10 hours, I am still exhausted. My work schedule is my first suspect as I work 10-7 on Monday, and Wednesday and then 7-4 on Tuesday, Thursday and Friday. They recently checked my Testosterone levels and it was low around 200 or so, so I started Xyosted Injections. 2 weeks later my T level was at 707 (Normal). What do I do? I am worried that there is something else wromg other than my primary diagnoses of: ADHD, Combined Type, MDD, GAD, PTSD, and my panic disorder. Any advice on where to begin with doctors? Im supposed to see an Endocrinologist the first week of Feb.",3.151721153846154,4.800146537500002,4.623750000000005,83.83394230769233,74.25,7.4230769230769225,27.30769230769231,8.139509932561175,1.8034711538461536,626,24,124,10,13,209,108,160,0.183,0.8170000000000001,0.0,-0.9788,0,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,4,9,3,0,1,4,0,12,9,2,1,0,19,18,17,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,1,0,6,10,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,3,0,2,3,1,18,0,17,15,2,31,0,1,1,0,2,12,0,3,19,81,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15007311076956,0.12202447580077935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491793977221047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111634677768348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267434928538849,0.0,0.0,0.14311530631068894,0.12781283345477618,0.10927722657468897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431538988309697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932152767820155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21243386428261649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13048200430287146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245949553748497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488429642059116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602333311791384,0.0,0.0,0.12584263977912322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179604219932057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234905244588185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14651159063813446,0.0,0.0,0.1192054330136282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180453721180067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459698850170388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329704840077148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950763437286403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499264156522265,0.0,0.0,0.09613335617437116,0.0,0.0,0.08838577053498617,0.0,0.09972375988473993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5740926953837291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004968277455988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18181810034643425,0.1268146194043715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pickypineapple2608,2020/01/27,"I just want to give up It really sucks being born in a time where im going to see a mass extinction, its inevitable that there will be one by at least 2050. I just am so sick of all of this stuff thats happening in the world, all of these wars and fires and viruses, its just so pointless to live in a time like this, in a time where these selfish money hungry world leaders deny the fact that our world needs to be fixed, where people and animals are dying because someone just wants money, its so stupid, i just want to give up and just... end it all for me.",7.832499999999996,4.973323456896555,7.597655172413791,81.91286206896551,64.43103448275862,10.659310344827588,31.820689655172416,8.238735603445708,2.054988275862069,435,10,97,4,5,139,70,116,0.166,0.7929999999999999,0.040999999999999995,-0.9545,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,0,13,5,3,0,6,0,6,1,0,0,4,18,16,7,2,4,6,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,13,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,4,0,1,0,2,5,1,17,12,4,20,0,0,1,0,3,14,1,0,6,69,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644897772077486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23230750091714755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19825317286377214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4294497565603719,0.12721174416562114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19793834902582916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417824062397172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935546786587913,0.0,0.19765220100066452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597232372153714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167776649118475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15518041495339013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14339573499800012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17836913500199142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18965639166031456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562398502143824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39156352193077504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3960746443969927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marestoya,2020/01/27,"I’m tired of feeling like shit because of my nationality I’m a Polish immigrant living in Germany. I moved here around 1.5 years ago and im currently attending a German high school (Gymnasium). Now i obviously don’t speak speak perfect German but I would say I’m doing a fairly good job. I’m doing really good at school, i made new friends here and I’m in a relationship with an amazing German guy. feel accomplished and i work really hard to improve my language and my knowledge about the German culture but I’m really tired of people making degrading comments about immigrants or Polish people in general. Nobody has ever said anything like that to me directly but they often stare, make comments amongst themselves or just laugh when i mispronounce something. Some people tend to be really passive-aggressive about the way i speak. Some teachers talk about immigrants in a somewhat judging way, making me feel as if i was worse, just because i wasn’t born here. I’m mentally drained and i feel really uncomfortable in my own skin. I don’t know how to deal with all of this.",4.5633333333333335,7.028943169154233,5.672462686567164,74.28292288557216,72.5323383084577,8.844776119402985,30.56965174129353,9.444778638647367,3.3163950248756224,871,39,142,22,18,288,115,201,0.121,0.7020000000000001,0.17600000000000002,0.9196,2,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,3,15,10,1,0,8,0,9,4,2,5,4,37,27,14,0,2,8,0,6,2,1,1,2,5,0,1,2,8,0,0,6,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,4,12,18,8,22,21,5,21,0,0,1,0,14,9,1,7,10,85,20,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111981234920946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395633083637053,0.11245778431422357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15401549422932093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023755691877567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142699748318512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255498842708068,0.09024801111768938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097599902041256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21191413428445924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250835593305308,0.0,0.0,0.11316415010395105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347137743090226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13645480316154404,0.0,0.12536002308178718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694259978288388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343395100040876,0.0,0.11154902708368036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195336314966806,0.2529726960788241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273078712353941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13426557471377015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200737280261928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627376405047107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40464145215672026,0.0,0.0,0.13562788698956682,0.0,0.0,0.1201658750689281,0.10046027527688324,0.0,0.2556992716038633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967281719440965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725267167594373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153683162720864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29038853233439915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20054493418446767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196753718689787,0.0,0.12873797271717866,0.08973905350694318,0.0,0.0,0.08135042554302392
mentalhealth,caljones97,2020/01/27,"Recent diagnosis is affecting me more than I thought it would The past few months have been difficult for one reason or another and it eventually lead to me contacting a mental health service before Christmas. I had a phone call with them last Tuesday (21st Jan 2020) and it concluded with me being told I have generalised anxiety disorder and mild depression and that I will have group therapy beginning the start of April. 

I've always known i've had anxiety but always thought it was social because of how awkward and uncomfortable I am in certain situations when i go out (e.g. i don't go to nightclubs, i don't like drinking alcohol a lot, i'm not a fan of going to parties). Being told I had generalised anxiety wasnt much of a surprise and made sense when the nurse explained. But being told that I have depression, even though it's mild and I know that plenty have it worse, has unsettled me as I remember saying about 6 weeks ago to someone ""I know I have anxiety and I am pretty sure I don't have depression"". I know that anxiety can lead to depression which is likely what the case is here, but I still never expected it and trying to wrap my head around how to first deal with the diagnosis. 

It's strange how I can talk about my anxiety for what probably feels like forever but discussing anything else is quite largely unknown to me. I know this is probably not much of a post but I wanted to vent to people who I don't feel guilty about dropping it on. So thank you to anyone who reads this and I hope that everyone has a great day.",6.256194167589516,6.55482704651163,6.965553709856036,74.90712716869696,65.91029900332225,11.074270948689554,34.33019564414913,10.864195022040775,3.8166033960871175,1235,53,231,33,18,409,161,301,0.165,0.7509999999999999,0.084,-0.9549,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,1,5,14,15,0,1,12,0,33,4,1,9,3,52,55,24,0,4,8,0,2,3,0,2,2,1,0,0,21,15,2,0,13,2,0,5,8,6,0,2,12,3,32,9,30,38,5,27,0,4,0,0,17,4,0,4,19,164,53,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493197591790091,0.10239439471771733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944730507020194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046773150745764,0.4397776754827693,0.0,0.0,0.06699430855484496,0.0,0.07884550115330498,0.08529341398939667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05840639396459064,0.0,0.08152935721426928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783524694570783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179111842383547,0.09877845208298104,0.33009256883259896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980939434061686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938597469054479,0.0,0.0,0.08003902642391687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632832344874312,0.0,0.0,0.0915529234706453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689132992350227,0.06844844953082696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149804020147866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633573084409135,0.0,0.0,0.10563358922928606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833123873080303,0.10184417792278727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951634040183175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106241167937771,0.07809995304504065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14042740323259045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145633787184269,0.0,0.09066007817133256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655643699193796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647660148160466,0.0,0.14086638329083104,0.0,0.07389648547875341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649250110431902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146384645203973,0.06642430454776797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176186368504896,0.09747572978454502,0.20660410117393327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190835834262807,0.09583840076141054,0.0,0.0,0.09851117932166407,0.09460325773598426,0.0,0.10853685386891093,0.0,0.0,0.0761939237993346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769723352650833,0.0,0.09766874981107516,0.08118159706467701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781656121187846,0.0,0.0765159643409471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030212148020854,0.0,0.0,0.07701043612021273,0.0,0.08821125190834625,0.10956991249569506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413526780957608,0.15212880168836546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746587704119359,0.0,0.06505037956259857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05651267872297092,0.0,0.07685498615684264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764109501251456,0.06806243150227383,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnifORMeDBomBer,2020/01/27,"I need help grieving and not losing hope. Just a brief history my wife and I have been trying for almost a decade before my son was conceived. Finally that miracle happened for us. We where so excited when we seen the first ultrasounds I remember my whole perspective changing in a fraction of a second. From young and irresponsible to I'll do anything and everything to give this child everything I didn't. My heart was fluttering, happiness took me over and for the first time I felt whole. Like it didnt matter who I was, or anything unfavorable I had done. All that mattered was this little wonderful life....
We finally get to the day of my wonderful son Wendell!
When he was born he had some respiratory issues. Not for any reason in specific. Anyway, my sweet 6 lb 7 oz baby boy came into this world. He had to be taken to the NICU due to him breathing very quickly. 
My wife had gotten an epidural so she wasn't allowed to get out of the bed until she could move her legs. So I was the only one to be able to go and see him.
I remember walking in there so nervous and scared. And then I seen him. I finally was standing next to my little angel. When I walked in he was crying and fussing so much. The nurses said he wouldn't calm down. I reached into the bassinet and touched his foot and he just calmed down. I connect with him so much at this moment. Really stuck thru the beautiful time I got to share with him. 
Oh I an sorry I really want to share all the amazing moments I got to spend being the happiest dad in the whole world.
(I'm sure that's how every dad feels)
But on November 12 I lost the biggest part of myself. I woke up that morning to find my son in his bassinet blue and unresponsive. I'm unable to go anymore into it. 
I am just lost know. My son was so much more than just the gift of having a child. He was hope! He gave me the role of his father which I was so proud of. For the first time in my life I was  proud of myself because I knew I wasn't just a good father in was a great father. Which when I  lost that my sweet baby boy. I lost the pride I finally felt for myself. I lost my heart.
I miss him every single day. I feel so lost. I'm seeing counselor's.  And psychiatric doctor. But i dont want to be all medicated.
I just am looking for a way to feel a bit of happiness again. A bit of something. And to not just be paralyzed by any thought or visual reminder of my son. I want to remember him. The time inched with him was the happiest I have ever been. 
Any help on maybe grieving information or anything honestly Im trying to find help any way I can.
I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read this and /or is able to help with info personal experience. Or even just say a prayer. Thank you all have a wonderful day.",1.5352694012611607,3.713367516014237,3.4566866454392238,87.84097927202349,81.13523131672599,6.719660360866579,22.67103702316289,7.85451343220497,1.1654550415183866,2152,72,449,39,57,724,247,562,0.083,0.746,0.172,0.9954,1,0,1,0,0,0,58.0,4,1,0,13,29,33,0,2,34,0,42,9,5,3,6,84,92,38,2,8,18,12,6,1,0,1,4,2,1,5,16,27,0,0,19,1,1,8,9,12,0,5,47,16,75,21,68,38,16,67,1,10,6,0,58,26,0,12,31,309,91,2,0.12827646320464173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642251742013646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17446478753302402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360789129255433,0.044846942824507005,0.0,0.1583408990316156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03909807067523199,0.0,0.05457691108960209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14004467450677893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335705033319552,0.0,0.0,0.06784974460923966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05120915895904828,0.0,0.07045283571581401,0.12409156007995033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564819781455249,0.0,0.06563567924755441,0.07516952976129651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04236269707126414,0.058016702467356664,0.10807845276840293,0.0,0.11528661381423627,0.06273949766879718,0.0,0.0,0.0972906511090972,0.0,0.12316552111216393,0.28104119067339794,0.1172423634449695,0.16366784110770996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701915760865325,0.06152723609193503,0.07290247017145249,0.05379610565023943,0.10259440590267707,0.07071262676940714,0.0,0.0,0.05671722638616963,0.13655268037248208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200822652459026,0.17196201866855232,0.0,0.0,0.12740747180041767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692802963063081,0.06694365015711012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03524869472897072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906054595471468,0.03133470021367722,0.12856671556709345,0.0,0.0,0.053859960919546215,0.07175427523872963,0.4200867380816198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443547440879183,0.0,0.0,0.0646125206551468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816878984387588,0.14144694020165652,0.04755768604053922,0.0,0.0,0.06821173694144138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0434617256442132,0.04878001531297161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694554546002712,0.0,0.0,0.056003029908226636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06415558831867868,0.0,0.082177187035459,0.06594478429457462,0.0,0.0,0.21796834021323316,0.0,0.061010145761056976,0.051005296090282336,0.06421355883889199,0.0,0.1022197331644216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04937674419795219,0.0,0.07179749920443566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06044952424039494,0.0,0.04822396806353582,0.0,0.0,0.05904986641623745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091859158225085,0.18699759316654427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125993526177349,0.08709129822776149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715039548542606,0.0,0.0,0.05292075817092018,0.11349117228998655,0.10181988571395743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21482413522707605,0.0,0.0,0.2086655286567972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,doggolife123,2020/01/27,I just don't know if need help or not Ive been thinking about going to doctors for check up on my mental health but I always falter thinking I'm  not that bad they can't be anything wrong with I'm just worried if they find out 2-3 things more wrong with because they then your labelled as that then. And I'm always anger if a realtive dies I'm not sad at just angered  and I haven't found any outlets for this any advice would be greatly appreciated.,4.335087719298247,4.612066315789477,5.117631578947371,86.57258771929827,70.05263157894737,7.1754385964912295,28.464912280701753,6.42735559955562,1.1675964912280703,360,12,77,2,6,117,65,95,0.11599999999999999,0.69,0.19399999999999998,0.8024,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,3,0,4,7,2,0,1,0,8,2,0,0,0,23,18,10,1,5,11,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,5,0,1,1,6,6,0,0,2,0,9,1,11,13,1,7,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,4,2,48,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19595305218855893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337097175566319,0.0,0.0,0.2727310135893669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501696224276716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674320010214364,0.12223964039306558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081157795907788,0.0,0.0,0.20524828859106134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832784086124364,0.0,0.0,0.2198679412673248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11396434125290332,0.0,0.0,0.2210821638576953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21315124664187374,0.0,0.0,0.13440928772366295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020461351623358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020844523064696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148688524500636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332214926741819,0.2569797189740429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20364530616781665,0.0,0.1424489098943454,0.438490460072959,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tigersmhs07,2020/01/27,"Can someone explain if this makes sense at all or if this is just some other problem? (LONG) I know someone going through some stuff right now. They basically got diagnosed last year with depression, anxiety, and ADD. They were taken Lexapro and adderal. And they were doing good for a few months. And then the doctor gave them Wellbutrin. And she hit a low spot for about a month while on the Wellbutrin. Like it was almost like the Depression was way worse. So the doctor ended up taking back the Wellbutrin and continue on with what was working.

They were good for the rest of the year. I think the doctor switch them to Prozac and Vyvanse. And it still seems like it was doing okay. 

Her and her boyfriend have been on and off for years. And he's always suspected that her Depression was the reason they were on and off. So when she was actually taking her medicine, everything was going good between them. And everything seemed right in the world

Well during Christmas of this past year, she ended up running out of Vyvanse. While she was on a trip out of town. And apparently she hadn't taken it for sometime and didn't say anything.  We don't know the exact amount of time. 

She ended up hitting a real low and ended up breaking up with him. And she kept saying that she was a bad person, that he deserves better, and basically beating herself down.

They stayed broken up for about 2 weeks. And all her friends and stuff were convinced that it had to be some kind of low she was having. Because everything was going so good. She ended up having a doctor's appointment and a drug refill and whatnot. And she started thinking clearly almost immediately. Her and the boyfriend made up and ended up getting back together.

For three days.

The day she took her medicine she messaged her boyfriend and explained how much she missed him and loved him. And she knew that she was making a mistake at the moment they broke up. She just couldn't explain what was going on. And she really wanted it to work between them.

Well during their breakup, her and her friend drank more than usual? That means she would probably drink once a month or less the whole year. And now she's probably drinking twice or more a week.

After three days of her being back on her medicine, she ended up leaving him again. This time she comes around and says that she has feelings or someone else. He's shocked because he's never heard anything like this before. He eventually finds out through a mutual friends that she told her that the feelings were for one of his good friends.

What's weird about the situation is, her and the friend [crush] do not talk. They don't even particularly like each other. The friend has said on multiple occasions that he has no feelings for her as a person or whatever.

So the ex-boyfriend is in a frenzy right now trying to figure out if this is a medicine problem or if there's something else? Because he's hearing from people the stuff she saying. How the crush has cared about her more. And the ex never gave two craps about her. Which I know you don't know these people, but this is just not true. The ex-boyfriend has been nothing but great to her for over six years.

She's literally saying stuff like she's always had feelings for this guy. And she don't know why she feels this way and all this. And she knows the feelings are stupid because the Crush really doesn't want anything to do with her. And she's always known this for the longest time.

Which is shocking to everyone, because this is the first time they've heard this in six years when they all met.

Her friends are confused because they know the crush is not a good person at all. Like he doesn't treat people that good. But I digress because like I said I know you don't know these people.

But the stuff she's telling her friends is that she felt like the ex-boyfriend was ignoring her in groups of people, and he never cared about her. She felt like the Crush as always cared about her more.

This is just not true. And I know what you're probably thinking, the crush probably cheated with her. This is 100% not the case. Which is why I'm here. The crush has literally nothing to do with her. She keeps saying negative stuff like she's f***** up in the head. And she will even acknowledge that the friends are probably right about everything they're telling her about the crush and her feelings. 

But she just keeps saying she can't help the way she feels even though she knows they're probably telling the truth? It's almost like she knows.

So in conclusion if you've made it this far, is this any kind of sign? Like is this some kind of low that she may be experiencing? Do you think she's just not taking her medicine or whatever? If you have any questions feel free to ask",3.6548965340249033,5.849204909190372,3.541375314044899,89.77063038603886,74.30634573304157,6.351654645163034,25.069508604154855,7.242747475848597,1.0306152740632686,3773,126,743,42,81,1141,296,914,0.098,0.795,0.107,0.9184,1,0,4,0,0,0,97.0,1,4,15,6,41,68,3,1,56,1,75,13,2,7,13,170,151,75,0,13,30,1,11,13,9,3,7,12,0,4,57,57,3,4,42,2,1,8,22,21,2,8,45,24,106,48,94,97,20,113,0,9,0,1,151,49,1,25,64,520,163,6,0.0,0.0,0.03817398488439197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11751449445973552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019880667581102,0.0,0.0,0.05320380355240015,0.0,0.029925523318037408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657350581181184,0.034823732874744995,0.036570489871233264,0.0,0.0,0.09023906890582996,0.03266228938723478,0.16692379827790813,0.0,0.03328693769289536,0.0,0.0,0.03459710875738237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196516651816538,0.0,0.0,0.033697099064813565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07568453300359919,0.0,0.10107804550765624,0.039704424727163824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601576510415742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664241823718823,0.04536500718111208,0.0,0.06535692605967533,0.0,0.2425314809084788,0.0,0.0,0.07751214367550521,0.0,0.0,0.03737937551942836,0.14062863779736684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17801526929141664,0.0,0.07511973369915904,0.0,0.035753573892752036,0.03327415153231336,0.0,0.0,0.2720055035950492,0.0,0.020437786593373145,0.0,0.08892771444214742,0.22967502315622426,0.0312866148774464,0.043128252485924654,0.0,0.0387334365843254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04014683702577497,0.0,0.04408935997137317,0.0,0.02622028659503577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954058899422952,0.0,0.1222076038082774,0.2579818641489977,0.03188677501769044,0.0,0.0414208126314938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484470173666589,0.0,0.0,0.03461861593526951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035305947453063216,0.07402968639605549,0.05222376643569712,0.0,0.0,0.04261148299853407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367197125541744,0.0,0.028756577286032724,0.0,0.0905117294641702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507045609914002,0.0,0.0,0.04165989503062853,0.02650768841002183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03734300701034765,0.135599111922624,0.10247022027912024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253057968731405,0.07486218755181158,0.0,0.0,0.043821640312489314,0.0,0.0,0.04452538423279142,0.05012058854221014,0.04022030346094719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13362784231212865,0.07442124810796337,0.21776004822337047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122397380126164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0439708005138872,0.0,0.0,0.09943486085139963,0.030115310206854182,0.0386891681726784,0.0,0.02768825518485912,0.04169508531231386,0.031240061550284564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26868774237026777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08823666573579236,0.031441945287256176,0.10257380386828743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026214697996506,0.038433699238499035,0.0,0.09124118031871616,0.0,0.0,0.03737937551942836,0.04346206074514037,0.026558874071687603,0.0,0.0382130621266218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043083469298523185,0.0,0.04614617555652481,0.09315126462801816,0.06275695585009244,0.0,0.07034440691331056,0.0,0.070596671354056,0.04367437597982208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569574257162319,0.0,0.039865064033386036,0.027788639504281815,0.0,0.0,0.17633708986378754
mentalhealth,DadFoundThePornAlt,2020/01/27,"Are my symptoms significant enough to warrant treatment/ going to a gp? Hi all, sorry if this is a dumb question haha.

In a lot of social situations I'm *relatively* fine, this is something that has improved very slowly over time, for instance I'm good/okay at socialising with new people if I have plenty of friends that I trust around me. However there are other situations where I completely struggle to the point where I'd say it significantly hinders my quality of life.
Some examples of this include:
* public speaking: the last time I tried to speak publicly I had what I think was a panic attack. My hands were trembling to the point where I dropped my notes once. I also swore instinctively after every mistake I made which only exacerbated my poor performance haha. I probably blushed too.
* talking to women: this is probably my biggest crux as far as mental health is concerned. It feels like I literally cannot approach new women because I'm terrified that they'll find me boring/repulsive/obnoxious etc. I can talk to women in a friendly context but approaching new women genuinely feels impossible.
* Dependence on alcohol to appear even somewhat sociable: social situations are impossible unless I'm drunk. Even talking to my flatmates is a lot harder, though I find it sorta easier to be open with some people depending on the person and the situation. I would probably be extremely anxious if I ever went to a party sober.
* Over-analysis of literally the tiniest mistakes: this probably doesn't need much explanation, and I know a lot of people do this but I've recently been chastising myself mentally / out loud in private by swearing at myself and calling myself an idiot even if the mistake is extremely minor.
* Terribly low self esteem
* feeling anxious whenever I'm ""forced"" to be expressive: e.g. whenever I get dragged up to dance I usually find it very awkward and I may begin to panic, this often leads me to leave early.
* Leaving social situations early.
* Having a hard time expressing my opinion around people about serious issues because I think they'll consider my opinion to be irrelevant and idiotic.
* Being singled out of a group in public to answer a question. 
* Not being expressive when I'm sober: Usually this leads me to being over expressive when I'm drunk.
* taking over the phone to a friend: For whatever reason if I can't see the person's face I have a hard time talking with them/ being open. This isn't an issue for people I've never met before/ talking to company reps oddly enough.
*  **interviews**: Yeah this is a bad one lol. Inexperience + anxiety = a bad time.

I'm sure this list isn't comprehensive. Any advice would be great.",4.53783385093168,7.395574171842654,6.168743530020706,68.75820846273294,74.36231884057972,8.993944099378883,32.008669772256724,9.516144504307137,3.8979054865424434,2147,106,319,60,48,730,255,483,0.172,0.733,0.095,-0.9881,1,0,2,0,0,0,73.0,0,0,3,3,17,27,4,5,26,4,39,8,2,6,4,63,63,19,0,11,9,0,6,1,3,5,4,4,0,7,21,14,3,0,13,3,1,8,7,17,0,1,7,11,41,10,55,42,12,56,0,1,1,0,39,27,1,21,21,221,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514334857777854,0.0,0.0712436070556713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331122525884208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04533384728584574,0.0,0.050997823969963975,0.15062282684703632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118690295253942,0.0,0.07583999298553358,0.0,0.0,0.1113234122540627,0.08127558530178086,0.0,0.056726205617872776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807145946621362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989599930989022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13776359026506504,0.07434804953205748,0.13209295011109656,0.06030145949504333,0.05616734633933893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011220563664848,0.04762481828607752,0.0,0.0,0.18278923128278127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15451346379452902,0.0,0.03482922025949349,0.0,0.037886721971193936,0.05591465126243991,0.0,0.07349736226947266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194358084672006,0.0,0.0,0.07086077917489234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915991901368915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03663682434637031,0.054340107006311485,0.0,0.14117522950721892,0.0,0.0,0.04708679756477197,0.03256869272753882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700262014400507,0.0,0.06307914610639585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343633872677023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049005755081576965,0.04943055631376398,0.051415433322860235,0.19315369571000565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099504896873783,0.04517329281156258,0.05070102216198519,0.0,0.1564318233205445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23108232951586505,0.11641697290571618,0.0,0.0,0.12603817018532565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28750053048712426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14935800954794942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854175728594869,0.06582271753165267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053013936770215514,0.0,0.0,0.05312262535497175,0.0,0.06954515420426598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746659867221136,0.0,0.20386684404966507,0.0,0.051321250840225305,0.0,0.0746249580895724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969175056577916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283008827548926,0.0692894842830026,0.05012307720366825,0.2679102340152307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543127664292167,0.0654971011684235,0.0,0.1943617494694321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04526052127322307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14684208927281198,0.1100096634098178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179825214999486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471247207563234,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,olvfg,2020/01/27,"Today I couldn’t control my mind I just woke up today at 3pm and I couldn’t control my mind. Even when I opened my eyes, I still couldn’t stop it. 

For an hour I had a compilation of quick thoughts, I can't remember any, but I remember that it was almost suffocating me.

When I finally sleep, I had the weirdest dream. 

What could it be?",0.9556539235412488,2.896803760563383,3.1572635814889334,90.49211267605637,81.8169014084507,6.874044265593561,22.818913480885314,7.957251820313856,1.0642659959758558,261,9,60,5,7,89,47,71,0.068,0.89,0.043,-0.1154,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,3,0,9,2,2,2,0,17,11,4,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,3,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,1,14,0,4,1,0,12,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,9,43,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982435861664837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462993900133885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4440920885963864,0.15806710441581875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076076618743313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21687217743042406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949657134133786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3997970732263442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4485346643996533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19811819613347326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810326706324915,0.1655161493295979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571702112658102,0.0,0.0,0.3753147213605777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EnvironmentalPrize1,2020/01/27,"Thank you I dissipated too much in my life. Music is killing me. Dropped out of music college. Despite all efforts i suck. My girlfriend loved me so much but had to leave me because of my constant struggle with ""bipolar disorder"" as psichiatrists say. I don't believe i'm bipolar but there's something wrong with me for sure. I moved abroad. Now i am alone. Still trying to practice music on my own but i am resigned. I'm 25. People around me graduated, started a job. My interest in music just led me to failure. I don't have the chops to make a living out of this. I don't have the strength to get and keep a regular job. I don't consider starting university as a good option either. I'll rot alone, with my toxic love for music, poor until i'll reach the lowest point as a man. Thank you Emil Cioran. Thank you for reading.",1.1924545454545452,3.704637503030306,3.0032575757575763,88.22488636363637,86.0909090909091,5.239393939393938,25.21969696969697,6.742157984588678,1.146460606060606,648,28,126,8,20,215,99,165,0.2,0.639,0.161,-0.8146,3,2,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,3,0,2,7,14,2,1,8,0,10,5,0,2,2,18,23,9,1,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,1,7,0,1,0,1,1,2,4,5,0,0,1,1,24,9,24,22,5,16,0,1,0,2,8,7,1,1,6,82,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31574705686432497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356967523509957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292110148754297,0.0,0.0,0.17173860793855766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647247847804051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17470022001351618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963940212666716,0.0,0.0,0.1278526870106442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025303781428469,0.13548852038685189,0.16864336725812706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16140342490132795,0.0,0.0,0.10766719375796847,0.0,0.0,0.13460020393852093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751515712165404,0.0,0.10174950982926366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16201103865154326,0.22411004360046666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567712069100807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14409746247423508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247319957732408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122000427529235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734956174318033,0.0,0.0,0.21578423659318946,0.0,0.12173235163692575,0.0,0.0,0.15935496996108134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366530828268545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4210165771861196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349128769709658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16666040742079208,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Neondanublu03,2020/01/27,"To Anyone Who Needs This God put us in this planet because he has a plan for us, it’ll be foolish to veer from his plan and take your own life....",10.9078125,3.6703266562500048,10.165000000000003,79.18000000000002,63.6875,12.8,38.25,3.1291,2.4247749999999995,111,2,28,0,1,36,28,32,0.065,0.87,0.065,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,5,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,18,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22962077876198864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20018598528932685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23195445297928635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435000518871337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33012675702378363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24691148168278945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7900352968309022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Batmancolors,2020/01/27,"How to manage my studies while having schizophrenia and ocd I have recently being diagnosed with schizophrenia and ocd at the same time
Due to these mental problems I am feeling pretty distracted in my studies 
I constantly experience voices in head and hallucinate insects in night And also have repetitive thoughts running in my head 
So should I consider taking a drop year 
If not than how should I focus better on my study",8.05,9.666015333333334,7.724,66.40200000000003,62.33333333333334,10.266666666666666,37.66666666666667,10.355215969177356,4.500466666666668,350,17,49,8,5,111,54,75,0.11699999999999999,0.787,0.096,-0.1531,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,2,0,7,3,2,2,0,15,10,10,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,2,9,1,10,6,1,16,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,1,8,41,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010759526162891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22237766683503574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27171660548437826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552056414821071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459559259352409,0.0,0.0,0.12713528727258425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5160986145521914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533917196653025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359587914484948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558042070027761,0.0,0.2405934946570704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24826601840809856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189051094733858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996147531503016,0.14661630355326571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16191869382323007
mentalhealth,MS_88,2020/01/27,"After 2 years, 2 months and eight days, I'm finally off my antidepressants!!! Been waiting for this day. Can't believe it's finally here",2.4679487179487194,5.20927553846154,4.128461538461536,80.89987179487181,82.07692307692307,8.082051282051282,27.89743589743589,8.841846274778883,2.7856051282051286,108,5,20,3,3,36,24,26,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3801227819464679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4351770342807144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7391880949992025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26930132900616793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21726797713165594
mentalhealth,Mkygln,2020/01/27,"Idk what i’m feeling It’s my high school senior year and this should be one of the most memorable years of my life. However i’ve slowly been feeling really distant, numb, and quiet. I used to be energetic with my dance team and i used to hang out with them a lot. Now i just leave practice right away without saying goodbye or i ignore their group calls or plans to hangout. I find it comforting yet uncomfortable in a way. I used to be really close but now some of my friends became closer to the new members and replaced me. or at least that’s how i see it. i’m “friends” with almost all the members and they seem to care about me but i just never text or talk to them anymore because i’m scared they secretly hate me or don’t want to associate with me anymore. idek what im saying i saw a post on quora that explained this perfectly but i just wanted to rant. I’ve been feeling sad most of january and i didn’t want to start off 2020 like this but now i did Lol. Sorry for ranting",0.4095475113122191,2.7947601960784314,2.335686274509804,92.29174208144798,89.19607843137254,5.2953242835595775,21.08144796380091,6.844919456158928,0.5680533936651582,776,27,164,11,26,257,118,204,0.11599999999999999,0.713,0.171,0.9218,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,5,3,9,11,1,1,6,1,9,2,0,4,3,50,28,16,0,4,13,0,3,1,2,1,2,3,0,0,10,12,0,1,8,3,0,2,4,5,0,1,5,8,25,6,27,19,6,24,0,1,2,0,15,10,0,11,11,108,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701311219857555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291200270784424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379366781808943,0.0,0.0,0.08949651164673042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991360916829813,0.0,0.14968675786733635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22270085811725646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418542608791598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268564163226145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14494852705823233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15511715551117333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15858441959373348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15545493182127615,0.0,0.0,0.1036991394405994,0.07172595256462817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12481609625595165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323208341386692,0.1417939709982482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948503258930304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406073230097631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18810574152635887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537843777273955,0.0,0.23350492731502545,0.14698652432851295,0.1485837055139549,0.11699182826264932,0.13365404114376234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643463632037073,0.10391577442736284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800361099729663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38040072868307023,0.0,0.0,0.2597842770049063,0.11653419759968607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152355169143366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18908693163656168
mentalhealth,UnlimitedSour,2020/01/27,"Best ways to mitigate sadism? I don't want it, and it's starring to effect my daily life. I only seem to get arousal from aggressive pornography. The horrible kind where they hold a person down to long, or continue despite obvious distress. I feel more violent in my daily life more ready to snap at people, and the worst part I'm recognizing women less as individuals with years of experiences, Hope's, dreams, families, and more as objects of sexual interest only. It's terrible, my headspace is becoming exactly what I hate. People that may have had this problem and found a way out, please tell me what you did. If necessary I will kill myself before my desires warp me into something that would harm others, or impose my will over theirs. But I'm hoping there's answers out there.",6.940563165905633,7.666736465753428,7.466803652968039,70.42286910197873,64.47945205479452,11.146423135464232,34.03044140030441,10.980518767755715,4.026054185692543,628,26,106,17,9,207,106,146,0.203,0.657,0.139,-0.8994,0,0,1,0,0,1,19.0,0,1,2,2,3,14,4,1,4,0,9,3,1,1,2,27,19,10,1,7,4,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,9,8,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,9,0,0,3,1,16,5,18,12,7,13,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,7,3,74,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986996697347468,0.15309263186898855,0.0,0.18880749519484555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598934473380912,0.16960587602091454,0.0,0.09096937109593277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972652152677914,0.0,0.0,0.09399706779948218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776267472776404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3573882212878841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990469742713842,0.18735160594646724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541556124530207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592172603586571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27366374453152786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19482814490830305,0.0,0.24945791186748698,0.15709301003151746,0.0,0.19749034405261487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17215235335725745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16378595264607826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13850574485565714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15725180990301005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611729339320723,0.28561298119195233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12780496653127266,0.0,0.0,0.11585801284416865
mentalhealth,TreeStar671,2020/01/27,"Lost teen with a rant or something Hi I’m new to Reddit. I rlly don’t know how to use this. So I’m just learning. Just a heads up. So apparently this a mental health group or something? If any of you won’t mind me asking some questions. Have you ever over think about how everything is? That everything seems so pointless to you now. You thought what has your life become to. What future you will have? You basically made a story or some sort of vision of what life is to you. And then you just decide that everything is pointless and there’s no use anymore? The days aren’t the same anymore. Nothing feels...”okay” anymore. I keep having these battles in my head about what paths i should take. I’m so lost. I’m so confused. I’m so afraid. Is this normal? I don’t wanna sound edgy or stupid. I’m just bantering what I think and feel. After all, this is a mental health reddit.  I just want to know if others feel or know what I’m talking about...",0.2050868055555526,2.608537807291672,1.6875,95.62972222222223,92.80208333333334,4.094444444444443,17.52777777777778,5.82211442006289,-0.3871680555555552,737,20,156,6,27,236,101,192,0.107,0.8759999999999999,0.017,-0.9472,2,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,9,0,2,19,6,2,2,7,0,15,6,2,5,2,46,40,19,0,6,12,0,2,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,14,4,0,1,12,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,4,3,17,0,18,33,4,10,0,2,0,0,14,3,0,13,7,103,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779361972014449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3841027474921325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069271241377658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425827441409926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325995092525619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11677992759133116,0.0,0.0,0.3480849955506703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305554516618323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649912906573387,0.2744582545896566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475157070793356,0.0,0.0,0.21285284287507789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823767735032592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818596298933775,0.0,0.0,0.12215920106267758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602084056910435,0.0,0.1303559686367806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468727837268224,0.0,0.0,0.1264923078959215,0.12387661473290244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14462351066004114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11752938800149768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19877767494203655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706845199957748,0.10376709947409124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16544638196054667,0.0,0.1024923717678286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22300492851967185,0.0,0.0,0.07614755934429429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wubalubbadubdubitch,2020/01/27,"I feel good after writing this Growing up I thought people could only be depressed when they were older so depression at like 7-8 felt normal to me up until I turned 15. 

Sometimes I look back on freshman year even and think “Holy shit I was really depressed then” and every time I think that, I realize I kinda still am. I’m not dysfunctional, I do things I like, and people who talk about signs of depression could never realize it’s me (ik it’s just my case but still). 

It’s this weird thing where during school I’m this “class-clown” funny guy, I get excited about things and I’m always laughing, and the minute I have time to myself I feel everything. (And I never want to hang out with people outside of school even if we’re real chill inside, so that’s a lot)

Idk what it is but I’ve been having feelings like this practically forever, but when I remember my childhood (I’m still just 17) I don’t really think about depression being a factor; it’s like it’s so engrained into me that I don’t even notice it. People don’t know and I don’t really want them to. 

Besides, I always get over it eventually - I’ve had entire years where I feel good the whole time. Maybe the weirdest thing about this is that a lot of people know me for having dry-humor and my family thinks I’m kinda emotionless (in a jokey way). But I couldn’t be any more different. I feel everything just never gave a shit to show it. 

The amazing this is that anyone I know reading this would be so fucking clueless, and wouldn’t believe it. People talk about friends of theirs who have been depressed and I can just tell they think I’ve never felt it, and I play along. I might not even post this shit cuz it won’t do shit for me.

And please, I know I should see a therapist or something, but just don’t leave a comment saying it - I won’t be mad or anything I just honestly hope no one comments at all. I don’t need a pat on the back, and I’ve accepted who I am. 

So fuck it, I’m gonna start figuring out how to get over this depression shit, I’m not gonna let it fuck with me anymore. Jesus Christ just writing this I’m starting to have some type of revelation. I don’t deserve to feel like shit all the time and bear all the weight. Time to find out what’ll really keep me happy.

I’m smiling rn lmao, I don’t know why I just got so happy.",2.1889305816135085,3.839718625779629,3.7782972465899287,88.86952081537449,76.87941787941787,6.854845088991432,22.334617919983774,7.678348718463194,0.8631319000050709,1813,51,389,26,41,603,207,481,0.166,0.677,0.156,-0.7304,1,0,1,0,0,0,50.0,0,0,4,0,33,35,10,0,15,0,41,10,6,2,7,96,89,34,0,12,19,0,9,5,1,8,0,1,0,1,38,21,1,1,25,3,0,2,20,18,0,1,10,12,50,17,39,62,8,44,2,7,2,3,18,15,9,10,30,252,88,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419385359514224,0.0,0.0,0.042577266716787736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06209276246859587,0.04377869650539374,0.0,0.05152308218810005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628717368659588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705405594825069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997873153304664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3774841434643832,0.0,0.0,0.06541461536327105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654145002026182,0.0,0.05275202148154964,0.0,0.11254050687597714,0.0,0.05902357908252775,0.0,0.18994640969773333,0.08945786479225105,0.1202317399827658,0.0,0.05722483544661568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04837269393758562,0.17364711232793595,0.09813415952825208,0.0,0.0,0.10502938368173233,0.050075312566346036,0.0,0.0,0.061994209067566135,0.0,0.13330001945546546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062186324074491824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0556510626600916,0.0,0.0,0.1720453849874933,0.0,0.0,0.06629544766664121,0.0,0.06402344773297257,0.0,0.15294156572836035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05257702608884805,0.0,0.0,0.10645836552556877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290063270003003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06641981459463646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04642487029305,0.1931562176175709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134496730029373,0.0,0.07128243526239178,0.0,0.0,0.04242647495558944,0.04761808389641371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604372997146139,0.0,0.0,0.06872749466998254,0.0,0.0,0.05996352328568886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06262741344753622,0.07126442222424502,0.16043948168196612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092545751535623,0.0,0.0,0.04979035887556652,0.0,0.1267302768411476,0.049892438516702144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3856124873271817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04820059880392467,0.06192335593888084,0.0,0.08863202607438732,0.0,0.1500024070533198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064784855253163,0.0547243105924962,0.0,0.0,0.07269558156327123,0.16638245724521805,0.20059130590914148,0.0,0.04970571965372226,0.18254334326672636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810221249054893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385855496946822,0.04969727693957052,0.0,0.07624268530224873,0.0,0.0,0.056496210888355776,0.06990235399056406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04447668162315421,0.0,0.0,0.0806381800428783
mentalhealth,Skjdieuwbwrjdujw,2020/01/27,[Too Afraid to Ask] Is drinking typically allowed in therapy? I will be starting soon. I have a really hard time opening up to people unless I’ve had a few drink in which case I’ll spill everything. Is this something I could do during a session? Or maybe at least in the beginning?,3.0812727272727263,5.242660036363642,4.790909090909089,80.30636363636366,75.9090909090909,8.036363636363637,29.181818181818183,8.841846274778883,2.6438363636363635,222,10,41,5,5,75,45,55,0.046,0.9540000000000001,0.0,-0.3034,1,0,3,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,4,0,8,2,0,1,0,5,11,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,8,7,2,10,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,1,4,30,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744617717044485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344032445566476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5752018627904325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638547174111649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26299394570506496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29494497806625064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20353444884591665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18807767654468094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260156050385312,0.0,0.0,0.20780054082401175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357393336932722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17119141752581754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alzhan_Void,2020/01/27,"I need help. Please advise me, because my mind is very messed up right now This will be very lengthy, but I beg you, please read my thoughts. Theres nobody else. I would really appreciate it to have somebody to advise and listen (or read in this case) my troubles.


My mental health is in shambles. Where to start. Lets start with the academic stuff. My grades suck. They are terrible, yet I cant study. I simply idly scroll by in reddit, read novels/manga, watch YouTube. When Im on the verge of breaking down at my own patheticness, and force myself to study and do my homework. I cant. 
Every second I spend trying to makes my head hurt, and its not hurting due to overworking. Its this uncomfortable, nagging pain that numbs my brain and makes it hard to think. This numbing pain is combined with a longing to do literally anything else. Go have a snack, check my phone, go to sleep, it doesnt matter. Every fiber of my brain wants to run away because I am simply incapable of studying. You might be thinking I might just be retarded. But Im not, atleast not in the sense of being dumb. Lazy? Definetly. Foolish? Indeed. But I can comfortably make deductions and observations and think smart when I do something I enjoy, like games or trying to understand a character in my favourite book. Yet when it comes to studying, I just cant. Atleast not when doing homework. Within the class, theres still a nagging to escape and not do it, but if I ignore it I can still enjoy listening to the teacher and trying to come up with smart answers/observations. I like doing that, it makes me feel a little useful and productive you could say, since there is always either praise from someone or a feeling of accomplishment. Sitting alone in my room doing homework on a subject I hate doesnt. I hate it. It makes me nauseous. You might be thinking ""why not pick up something you like?"" There isnt. I hate the very concept of work and study. All subjects, and any activity,I hate them all. Why I dont know, I used to enjoy it. Perhaps I enjoyed the company rather than the activity, but now I dont. And as expected, my reports are usually C, Ds or even Fs. I might get a B or A if its an easy subject like Spanish, but thats about it. Im 18, in Upper Sixth, following the British curriculum, though Im not british or in Britain. 

Now, my social life. Its in shambles. I have no friends. Not online, not  in real life. Why? In real life, because I talk to nobody, and nobody talks to me. I used to have friends, but then changed schools for a year for personal reasons. Had a couple of superficial buddies there. Then returned to my old school, yet we were now distant and awkward. We hanged out at first and chatted, but grew apart. Now its not surprising if I spend my day having uttered literally 0 words outside of the classroom. We used to geek out over games, but my parents took them away when I was 17 and then ""forgot"" where they put it. I havent asked since, since I know its for the best. Yet now I dont follow their conversations. Im not interested in random celebrities who Ive never met. I dont care about some dudes kicking a ball around. No, Im not buying the 20th FIFA game that looks exactly like the 19th but slightly tweaked. No, I dont want to go smoke weed and do drugs with you. 
Due to my clashing interests, we stopped talking, and I stopped getting invited to their parties, which I used to attend to play games, hang out or drink. After having spent half a year in solitude, Ive lost my ability to socialise, in the sense that I have no tact of social queues (or perhaps never did) and talk about things nobody cares about, and I dont care about what they are into. I tried to be respectful and lend an ear, but obviously we dont share the interests. I now have trouble even producing my voice. Usually the first spoken words of the day are hard to pronounce because my voice chords feel strange when used, and I end up saying it weird until I get used to my voice. If on a holiday, I may spend the whole week without speaking even once, other than my own mutterings to myself.

At home, I'm alone nearly all day. My mom is in another country with my sister due to family problems. Before they simply fought, so atleast its quiet now. I live with my dad, but he  always either comes home in the morning/late night, or not at all. Every time he comes, he is either drunk or drugged. He does cocaine. And also often visits prostitutes. When my mom found out it was the breaking point. (She felt it weird how he is never home, and how his eyes were sometimes glaced, so she investigated, noticed the odd white powder he sometimes had, and got mad, trying to make him stop. He promised he would. He didnt. Then she installed a GPS in his car to know where he drives, and found him driving to brothels. That was the last nail on the coffin. They are now unofficially divorced. Why am I sharing this? Because theres nobody else to share it with. This is an outpour of half a years worth of locked up emotions. A tangent of tangents.) Well, back to the point. Im alone all day at home too. And even when Im not, I dont speak to my dad because Im socially inept, and the age barrier means our interests clash. Also, its hard to talk to drunk people. But dont misuderstand. He isnt a bad father. He isnt abusive, and he works to earn us money. He is just messed up, just like me. As such we arent poor. In fact you could say we are more mid-upper class, since we can afford a small home on rent in a nice neighbour quite close to the beach. Not that I ever go there.

Ive also got a music addiction. When I wake up, I wake up to the sound of the music in my earphones. If not, I put them on and get out of bed. While Im having breakfast, I listen to music. When I go to school, I listen to music. When Im in class, I listen to music if we are allowed. When Im on break or during a self study/free period, I listen to music. On my way home, I listen to music. At home, I listen to music. When I lay down to go to bed, I turn on my music and fall asleep to it. And its rarely relaxing. I usually listen to heroic, epic, instense or energetic music. Why? It helps boost my morale enough to keep going. Stuff like the Demon Slayer OST, Persona music, boss fight themes, Dark souls, or Mili tracks if I feel like being even more depressed. And I need to listen to music all the time. Otherwise, my thoughts become dark and complicated. And I start thinking about depressing things. Every second without music makes me more depressed. I need the loud music to drown out my thoughts and liquify my worries. This also plays a factor in why I dont talk to people anymore. Im always listening to music and/or on my phone. The internet also helps dumb down my excessively complicated thoughts or focus them on enjoying something else and thinking hard about something else. 

Ive got every depression symptom. When Im not listening to music, I am always very sad and depressed, and my thoughts can casually shift to suicidal ones. Im also absolutely fearless of death. In other words I couldnt care less if I die some day. I have 0 self preservation desires. Instead its the opposite, I have sacrificial urges. I assume this is because my life is so empty I want to go out by protecting someone. If I ever see somebody about to get hit by a truck, I can absolutely guarantee I would throw myself in the middle to defend them and selfishly end my life in a more meaningful way, having saved a life. Ah, getting isekaied also seems like an interesting prospect.
And obviously as you could tell from before, I am constantly anxious. Even if Im very good at having a passive mask of nonchalance in real life, not that anybody cares to check my wellbeing though.   Im also always tired, no matter whether I slept well or not. Sleeping well simply erases physical fatigue, but my mind still always feels exhausted.
I also have very bad sleeping patterns. Either I dont sleep at all, sleep very little, or sleep a lot. When theres no school, the sunlight outside my window is what notifies me that I should go to sleep. For example, today I went to sleep at 2pm. And woke up at 8pm. My eating habits are also terrible. As you would expect, there is 0 regard for a balanced meal. If Im entertained on my laptop, then spending the whole day without eating is nothing unusual. But if Im bored I might spend all day snacking on cookies or the like. I eat only to shut up the pain if I feel it or to pass time and avoid responsibilities.

Theres so much more I could tell you about my messed up self, but this would turn into a proper novel if I do that. This is the overview, more or less. I was planning on contacting a doctor and asking for antidepressants or something. Im just generally a failure of a human being, messed up in the head and thoroughly lazy. I thank you for reading through this slog of filth and disappointment. If you've got some advice, that would be very much appreciated, but I honestly just wanted to express myself a little. My emotions have been becoming damper. I dont feel rage, hatred, jealousy or other such emotions, except for the ocasional pang when seeing somebody happy. I myself also dont particularly feel ever joy or happiness. Just sadness or that empty feeling of satisfaction when Im enjoying reading or watching something. That feeling of entertainment. If I see something funny I laugh, but that is only temporary. I don't actually stop feeling depressed. Nonetheless, even when I feel sad, I have trouble expressing it. When my mom tried to kill herself. I felt very sad and guilty, yet I couldnt cry. On the other hand, I had no trouble sobbing over some poor souls fate in my manga. In other words, my emotions are also messed up. Im sick in the head.  

Thank you for listening. Please help me. My greatest social enjoyment is opening up the notifications of a website or app and reading the comments people leave behind, even if half the time they are insulting me and shitting on my opinion or point of view. I also enjoy arguing in the internet, even if its with idiots, or if I am being the idiot. Thats because Im that starved to socialize. If a classmate ocasionally acknowledges my existence I get a pang of happiness that I otherwise dont experience. Way too exagerated for how I should be feeling.

That is all. If you want to ask me something else in the comments. Feel free to do so, I absolutely dont mind answering them, even if only to pass the time or have a semblance of a convo.",3.200080295138889,5.244480392578126,4.421259114583332,83.62942664930556,75.15234375,7.012048611111113,26.66098090277778,7.908726449838941,1.6980773350694447,8236,313,1567,126,180,2703,681,2048,0.163,0.688,0.149,-0.978,5,4,13,0,2,1,304.0,11,13,14,12,113,126,19,2,93,1,140,53,21,22,19,330,272,172,6,49,104,8,21,10,3,15,22,25,15,5,73,83,10,10,40,25,15,32,61,63,4,8,34,55,224,64,238,204,35,242,5,16,9,0,141,110,5,66,103,1064,297,31,0.0,0.024379509807007656,0.020079466838637997,0.02243116642356066,0.0,0.02010688837829849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393241633745067,0.0,0.21391281576553312,0.10272660670589667,0.0,0.0,0.01399256604144334,0.02157600831751529,0.0,0.02324532306641534,0.020406126239073712,0.0,0.0,0.016932513187640674,0.018317238600414645,0.05770809158640479,0.0,0.03866415728770499,0.01582187797205863,0.03436064422465517,0.10034480309790136,0.04544973701102055,0.03501777263172652,0.0,0.021593521050565303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04593983426370274,0.0,0.0,0.10489436940186764,0.0,0.021766960445474243,0.07089852267499272,0.0,0.0222356330122037,0.0,0.0657138943662767,0.02276724626449478,0.02260206132137428,0.09288992251941096,0.0,0.10633384327215764,0.0,0.021354914880160687,0.0,0.0,0.02106067949666886,0.018006428485827355,0.0,0.3617284465348356,0.02015690659603975,0.04772387059335542,0.06316396902974168,0.10313297656492236,0.09258211620419314,0.03644892751644364,0.021260782509100268,0.0,0.13590429217153502,0.05583723012032508,0.08668195510412863,0.0,0.0,0.0201275358071084,0.019397471749612892,0.0,0.14565569225762776,0.01469968809128056,0.03951288308798747,0.0,0.0,0.03500432162375984,0.0,0.04512162585530278,0.03179434316563656,0.0,0.07525174581059009,0.0,0.10524569210721453,0.017258395157612034,0.06582687637431113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571145129969737,0.07372916872256165,0.0812592085398924,0.06335155356533265,0.021871607898198184,0.0,0.0,0.0551673477923829,0.0,0.1444777029619549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04405463529291756,0.0,0.5111956425894937,0.0,0.0,0.01828913008266921,0.022764589003974052,0.0,0.03392453199369678,0.01677240255367235,0.0,0.021787294048088074,0.0,0.021040625424912262,0.10173537320041234,0.10052523912212682,0.061868470437227666,0.01816921929589766,0.0182093473546693,0.01727888064549767,0.0,0.02246142429411026,0.017493205002909372,0.0,0.0,0.09614371838007564,0.0,0.0,0.022413585126243484,0.0,0.0,0.02073603590316013,0.10914082958376324,0.06232848716777345,0.07229601994546819,0.0,0.0,0.03025184516399337,0.0457711201516474,0.0476090530183728,0.0,0.0,0.019309431174803503,0.0,0.019743481566950917,0.023426214501708568,0.021591329204863653,0.02191305108182889,0.013943009932285193,0.046947531046527526,0.0656837912630705,0.0,0.022847507655960136,0.0,0.0,0.04279497484129301,0.017966401257066437,0.0,0.06775968131745988,0.058353664832616566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0196887070732443,0.0,0.04136965979789105,0.0,0.0218853910029974,0.12349100159460047,0.07026088412468788,0.013181682481068513,0.02115582777197166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017572018198722242,0.0,0.049089216277861496,0.0,0.0832971162731294,0.0491898584442254,0.018731859201882653,0.06439659689126237,0.0,0.02112124071288085,0.06808359737153495,0.0,0.16472900241790528,0.1048745565698701,0.03486840575009156,0.12672491477431594,0.040700905168295116,0.0,0.043691959601899484,0.0,0.04929669631050937,0.06881071677219626,0.0,0.0,0.04710980203936541,0.02250709465118976,0.0,0.0,0.021386618230175583,0.0,0.09923053613339633,0.03596912573704692,0.037887721287538735,0.0,0.0,0.027339912829859814,0.07910664009344709,0.04043215250819469,0.08167628156106425,0.059990929034399884,0.023649390151290108,0.019503893650696682,0.0,0.022860987924468192,0.08381960114602394,0.04476213619728135,0.0,0.021420617910589676,0.02475071375073791,0.12439900757469345,0.0679855479347833,0.15279816465582602,0.060682072137827676,0.048997445111899664,0.01650503893819351,0.0,0.05550160103184526,0.01907440414227881,0.11140127437559527,0.04594533092842519,0.0,0.05950435665127703,0.0,0.029959532502221806,0.020896196278384814,0.0,0.08770073133945705,0.0,0.0,0.03975132083573426
mentalhealth,LuckyGWiz,2020/01/27,"Why do I want to go back? I’m going to try an keep this as short and precise as possible 
Depression plagued my life for 4 years and there was nothing I wanted more than to be happy again
But eventually I got over it and I’ve been depression free for 3 years, but I always had a strange desire to go back to being mentally ill but I mostly tried to ignore it.
5 months ago I became suicidal for about 2 months.
But now I feel incomplete and I need to be depressed and suicidal again 
The need to be whole again consumed my mind
And I have gone out of my way to ruin things in my life so I can feel that way again. 
I know it’s not healthy but I need to be depressed again, there was something so comforting about it.
I don’t know what to do and I’m afraid if I tell anyone I feel this way they’ll think I’m crazy 
I need advice",0.6080399500624196,2.5464583932584297,2.5194756554307105,94.6123845193508,83.04494382022472,5.9780274656679175,20.001248439450688,7.1686216300943375,0.2943772784019973,646,18,151,9,18,215,98,178,0.24,0.688,0.07200000000000001,-0.9887,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,14,10,0,1,3,0,15,3,0,0,1,34,36,17,2,8,7,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,9,8,0,2,6,0,1,4,2,7,0,0,6,3,21,4,23,24,3,24,0,5,0,0,2,4,0,3,13,99,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280009960228933,0.11139599694250962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456480798975504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786911772964083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932599569171611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4329463713874481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906226631713028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21425794036878387,0.0,0.10050718469195886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377459858189947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169838681827213,0.0,0.0,0.13812632531391048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775242924149974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664253296462544,0.0,0.12688760004794422,0.0,0.2006120115009073,0.0,0.0,0.3727212291814787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205806416836887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14167038567232285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674440833155977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749180691635334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983828377651764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348740877898089,0.08052218307733841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063895675449664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482430172664864,0.29924526494577125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339470112400285,0.14030244531422142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16185054150295836
mentalhealth,brandodano,2020/01/27,"I’ve been feeling triggered and need some support. I was in a relationship and thought it was all perfect. But then she ghosted me for like a month then apparently dumped me. I was genuinely sorry for my mistakes and have from them on sought inner peace from the past. But I wish it didn’t have to end with such trauma. 
I’ve been having PTSD symptoms from her and this breakup for almost what seems is a year. I wish we could at least talk about it so this pain didn’t continue but it’s like she hates me and ignores me from now on. I just need to feel some support and that’s all I ask for...",3.286016260162601,4.358585406504069,3.842439024390245,91.85601626016262,72.98373983739837,6.767479674796747,25.861788617886177,6.937597516519254,0.829578861788618,467,15,105,4,9,147,76,123,0.12300000000000001,0.72,0.156,0.4920000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,1,1,5,11,2,0,4,0,12,2,0,1,3,30,24,12,1,6,4,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,8,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,8,2,16,5,16,15,5,13,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,4,10,76,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18612881732844447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737697650017144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484075413100157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463171961631115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18796984259655847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18351490905387569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18162008167785326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836512982293207,0.0,0.0,0.27565066090283835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19778607572069434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774404875486743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21728009294581527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19956217647734698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921530492908501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080739177470009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4218616976056404,0.0,0.19319722010601947,0.0,0.14940077267220422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475654577676968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4274984127795655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969859841562712
mentalhealth,giallamaX,2020/01/27,"I don’t know what’s wrong I don’t know what’s going on. Certain things just put me in this feeling, I can’t explain it. At dinner today I sat at the corner of the table so I had no elbow room, no room to move or anything, people would put their arms and sleeves over and on my food and I just got this feeling, I just wanted everything to stop, I wanted to push them away and cry. I could hear everyone like they were yelling. It’s not the first time it’s happened. It happens when my dog (a chihuahua) barks non stop, I feel the need to yell, cry, hit something (usually me) and it won’t stop even when he stops barking. I don’t know what to do. After dinner I went downstairs to have a shower and just,,, curled up and twitched like something was wrong. After my shower it didn’t get any better so I got changed and sat on my bed with a towel over my head, it was dark and it helped, I don’t know what to do. I can’t talk to my mom because she’s a firm believer in the law of attraction and whatever you give out you get in return so I tell her I need a mental health day she says it’s all in my head and to get on with it. I don’t know what to do, I want it to stop.",0.8867456667845772,2.234471832684825,2.7402281570569507,96.223090732225,79.70038910505838,5.606579412805092,20.63123452423064,6.1124844417494595,-0.10853151750972767,899,23,220,6,22,300,124,257,0.113,0.815,0.07200000000000001,-0.8809,3,0,2,0,1,0,29.0,0,2,3,2,11,7,0,0,10,0,19,9,4,0,2,44,47,17,0,7,6,1,3,2,0,2,2,4,5,0,19,14,3,5,9,0,0,6,12,2,0,1,10,7,36,5,32,33,1,39,0,0,0,0,17,18,0,1,17,143,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276592798712317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805461640156621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053314297560173,0.0,0.0,0.0652282316774291,0.0,0.0,0.12055610111420355,0.0,0.09463574242104288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131953261169356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543344535675801,0.0,0.23507624857377696,0.06900829026700292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706746847433481,0.0,0.0,0.10224625931382893,0.0961676858385888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16231228347060792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101697068888268,0.12938884121451652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677144574077157,0.1026473363254465,0.0608124535568551,0.0,0.17116066244330894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892453678110456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196325568378672,0.11373952715814507,0.12060052020587393,0.0,0.07172207093415718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29403113585919083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455283597281476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783418072130176,0.0,0.0,0.12532099700956434,0.0,0.11372759679221504,0.0,0.15868321426202045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418263022162737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151357854441551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509333613385679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647527693514288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4472978407389635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600521668696888,0.09352561943926893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108825222834521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062394497321914766,0.0,0.10142663730524087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11784904142517245,0.0,0.18933999431751605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919315114207418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07601208958818799,0.2339826690099129,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dash-slash,2020/01/27,"Why do you find life worth living? I have been seriously struggling with enjoying my own life, seems like I have nothing... My family is all as emotionally challenged as me; I feel like I have no friends; I spend most of my days by myself. I go grocery shopping, I go to my college classes. I just don't know why I am doing any of it or how to change.",2.2325000000000017,3.783030583333337,4.167777777777779,86.555,76.5,7.022222222222222,27.277777777777786,7.793537801064563,1.5537611111111107,270,11,58,4,6,92,51,72,0.109,0.711,0.18,0.743,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,2,7,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,1,1,10,14,4,0,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,1,3,2,2,2,0,0,1,1,16,5,8,13,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,41,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130565288502924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25092851129524874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15297581744533453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668205862949525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236131554157358,0.0,0.11993657645704528,0.16945732310624245,0.0,0.0,0.21679854426435374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18326185730314604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.269614991408202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036014423312686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350859050439424,0.2317700596158235,0.0,0.2094539180487392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22760194055529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159400048111868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24797527672493655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4280762428220086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crustlg,2020/01/27,"Being comforted/excited by imagining myself as something scary Hard to explain but I’ve always had this thing where I periodically imagine myself as something that other people would be scared of. For example I’ll imagine myself sitting on a bus and my eyes will start bleeding, or I’ll walk into class with very dark circles under my eyes with extreme weight loss, and everyone will observe me but not approach me. 


These visions comfort me so much and sometimes get me super excited that the upper half of my body jerks forward or ill suddenly stand up and pace around for a few minutes until the energy wears off. It will instantly elevate my mood if I’m down. Has anyone had similar experiences?


I will be going to therapy in a few weeks for suspected bipolar/bpd as those are the things that describe my other experiences the best, but of course I do not know if I have either and it could be something else. Its hard to figure out the cause of these visions, however",8.97034188034188,8.064677670329674,9.024139194139195,66.38197191697195,60.75824175824175,11.825152625152626,40.002442002442,10.980518767755715,4.579287423687424,784,36,128,17,9,258,120,182,0.102,0.773,0.125,0.8151,1,0,3,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,3,3,8,1,1,8,0,16,7,4,1,0,30,22,17,0,4,10,0,3,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,14,10,1,0,7,0,0,4,2,3,0,1,2,5,16,4,26,10,5,22,0,1,2,0,1,12,0,4,6,102,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628179433295252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229252217362143,0.0,0.0,0.15650153055467375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844939168069546,0.0,0.0,0.1952769871642739,0.2214171415480656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18059763290861533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036402090102232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686046147720358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798685830176902,0.0,0.34393723080455585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09184956978958306,0.0,0.09991263335397778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31496908467806606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661647690069687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292350930603916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187934380311932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600900890012924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40602414658879227,0.17387320471041487,0.0,0.12443394079562944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20104552281668195,0.0,0.23359078824291596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14505550485492766,0.0,0.0,0.14101819122634013,0.21408012902779414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12488507852086556,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThorowawayRMentalHea,2020/01/27,"How do I bring up my sexism to my female therapist? For reference, I’m a second year college student. 

My father died when I was very young. I grew up with my mother and a few older sisters. 

For the longest time I internally blamed my mother for my fathers death even though it was purely of natural causes. I have gotten past this but I think it’s left lasting effects. My sisters and my mother would frequently lash out at me and I think from a young age that enforced a sort of misogyny within me. I was also told to “be a man” a lot in situations that caused me panic. 

Flash forward to high school and my first girlfriend cheated on me. She also would frequently act like I needed to man up about things. 

I think the combination of what happened with her and with my parents had created a deep-seated resentment toward women. For a while I just kinda went with this subconsciously. I still had/have plenty of friends that are girls; however, I had this hatred about me. For example, and your going to hate me for this, but when some girls at my high school accused one of my favorite teachers of sending inappropriate  messages, I absolutely refused to accept it until later when there was undeniable evidence. I also have a very hard time coping if I’m outperformed by a woman in something. I feel incredibly angry toward female figures of authority in my life. I was resentful toward this women’s march in 2017 as well. I (wrongly) felt like it was a misandrist movement. 

About a year ago (freshman year of college), I started seeing this girl and we’ve been together since. I really love this girl, I’ve learned a lot from being with her. I realized how horrible I had become and began to try and change. I was doing well it until the whole Iran thing started. A few weeks ago when the draft fears were going on, I just kinda relapsed and felt an intense hatred toward society because it makes me feel so expendable.

I can’t take this anymore. I don’t want to be sexist anymore. I know that it’s wrong for me to have those thoughts but I just can’t control how I feel.

I’ve been going to therapy for about two years to deal with general life stressors and anxiety. I have been seeing a female therapist. I want to bring this up with her. I am really scared to because 1) this is not an empathizable issue and 2) I am scared of judgement. I know she wouldn’t overtly judge me, but I’m scared it will make her see me as a fundamentally shitty person, which I know I have been, but I’m trying to fix that. So how can I go about this?",4.2836301220575415,5.724866044354839,5.553833914559722,79.12085222319095,71.01612903225806,8.184742807323452,28.526373147340887,8.685302888712808,2.2536821708805577,2002,75,370,35,37,669,233,496,0.177,0.746,0.077,-0.9961,2,0,1,0,0,0,52.0,0,1,0,3,27,18,4,5,22,0,37,3,0,10,1,72,77,37,2,7,10,8,6,2,2,4,2,0,0,10,29,20,0,2,18,0,0,12,5,11,2,4,22,9,67,7,68,48,6,64,0,0,3,1,33,22,0,7,34,275,96,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531351306707512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20722579390381773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607779448719467,0.0,0.17132457768954307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530863876781467,0.09539607013461447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774649405908572,0.09137489551459184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687860182312792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905039005452875,0.0,0.0,0.08964518131898372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05705087087499421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971975889672944,0.1310236778463828,0.0,0.16586999239922934,0.0,0.0,0.0734718161256928,0.0,0.0,0.06673427812745357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19635904698055334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638246340882987,0.0,0.07737638777446451,0.08527892202187218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18252305252853795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015463615523067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424108145035008,0.07040838497913178,0.0,0.0,0.09384833192880372,0.0,0.12202056834337276,0.08439840045074859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686844158698553,0.07795817353586737,0.0,0.1153139836256526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404708842895572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05853095929093639,0.0,0.0,0.10134422479202293,0.09591089348748573,0.0,0.08245615344933091,0.0,0.07542063770226645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067000947893887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594338680262987,0.17483528109471366,0.20649268817195807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145154248413949,0.09709081739074572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649685813738791,0.0,0.0,0.12227547811746085,0.0,0.06898039325657469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649443865777578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877906810875554,0.20057957346513944,0.11476943161009455,0.16603974154214216,0.08486448349370904,0.06857330137901142,0.10073367636373548,0.0,0.0,0.08253645783844055,0.0,0.11728796212311995,0.0,0.08437730024281212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14253933529949664,0.10189420824451034,0.0,0.06928602696823816,0.0,0.15532571357038424,0.08007189106029777,0.0,0.09643628984131064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122718790293362,0.18887831031927524,0.0,0.22249456445888866
mentalhealth,Gretel_PX,2020/01/27,"My parents would blame for my sister's death Hello, I'm Gretel, 18 year old Mexican female. I want to be brief, I tried to kill myself two months ago by jumping off the rooftop, but I only broke my arm. However I stopped thinking about suicide thanks to my psychologist. She told me about this social media site so I come to share what I feel.

All my suicidal thoughts started when at age 5, I accidentally caused an accident which killed my sister. She was my twin, 5 as well. My parents won't stop blaming me for her death. We were playing on my house stairs and I stumbled and made a decoration statue fell on her head. She had seizures and I didn't do anything to save her. When my mom came to help her she was dead. I cannot forgive myself for that even if my psychologist has already told me I'm not the one to blame.

I am following my therapist's advice on posting my story on many websites so I can see that many people would tell me it is not my fault, so please be honest.
Sorry about my English, I speak Spanish as my first language.",3.5463571428571434,4.932344528571433,4.58779761904762,85.54741071428572,72.76190476190476,7.154761904761906,27.886904761904763,7.645422480735847,1.5551190476190475,821,31,167,10,16,268,133,210,0.223,0.628,0.15,-0.971,3,0,0,0,0,2,21.0,1,0,0,1,10,11,2,0,4,0,16,2,2,2,1,23,31,12,7,4,4,5,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,2,4,1,0,6,5,4,1,3,10,3,44,7,22,16,1,26,0,1,1,0,23,8,0,1,11,110,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029996354242834,0.11819936944180515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714587892480951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972885558028707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525073792880232,0.0,0.13697865397696882,0.0,0.11486206550157085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807093361259849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742156871757214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342037976214485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368470506991094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937612910108887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385841609739004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950456640996379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617113822660628,0.0,0.2703751048833232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15616818452002806,0.10643207077762877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13991968102149366,0.0,0.09035578512532716,0.10141236954349707,0.0,0.0,0.2961203502596739,0.0,0.0,0.09244234374985033,0.0,0.0,0.14636914207704854,0.0,0.0,0.12770448713994464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625606908687626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359250684688866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14926511348763266,0.094379939785036,0.0,0.0,0.22295925948498924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917083496282066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11654652087412752,0.12276312002110368,0.0,0.15481998808921255,0.0,0.08543997564590199,0.0,0.10585841339005216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25482741235750045,0.0,0.09053025981264927,0.0,0.13025546313530753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786483879402434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989019973210167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894442322646872,0.0,0.0,0.0858676814003358
mentalhealth,CoffeeInABowl,2020/01/27,"My gecko died (more below) My gecko, Leo has died. I dont know what to do now, I just feel empty. If you guys have any advice, cute pictures of leopard geckos please send them. Rest In Peace, Leo.",-0.0030000000000001137,2.256234700000004,1.1000000000000014,101.425,89.5,3.2,13.0,3.1291,-1.6684,148,2,34,0,5,46,34,40,0.184,0.635,0.18,-0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,4,6,2,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31147792054446505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21676031077856356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6616224604355597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37357155819314897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161169116652569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315611711605209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17517616321388987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3498907809839191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,18011theysaid,2020/01/27,"My whole life I've been told ""remember me when you're famous"" or ""help me out when you're a millionaire"" and I feel like I can't talk about it Because it makes me sound like the most r/humblebrag guy in the world. 

But since reddit is anonymous, here I go. I'm really good at the things I do. I was taking college courses on programming when I was 15 and I run a semi-successful YouTube channel on programming tutorials. I also act, sing, and write and have been provided a good amount of opportunities to expose those things from professionals seeing and liking my work.

Now this makes it seem like I've lived an easier life, and could even give people the viewpoint of thinking I don't understand a struggling life.



But that isn't the case. 


I grew up with an abusive father who had hidden cameras installed in our house. When I became an adult I moved out and due to financial struggles became homeless. I lived with my mom who makes no money. I've always been fiscally lower class. I own 1 jacket and 1 pair of jeans and theyre all ripped up. I had a therapist once in my life and she illegally revealed what I talked about to my father, who she was good friends with (I didn't know this during the therapy of course). This elevated my paranoia

I have depression, anxiety, and insomnia issues but I can't afford my medication.


I've tried to keep this relatively light hearted but here's the thing: I've had 6ish suicide attempts and used to have a major cutting problem. I'm probably gonna try to go again before I turn 21, which is in a month. Thanks for reading",4.593506493506492,5.834307961038963,5.577792207792207,80.00811688311687,70.03896103896103,8.846753246753249,28.935064935064936,9.218907990703514,2.4360597402597404,1244,46,239,25,22,410,178,308,0.08900000000000001,0.82,0.092,-0.2719,2,0,0,0,0,1,33.0,1,0,0,3,12,15,1,2,17,0,21,7,1,4,1,39,42,22,1,2,5,3,1,4,1,1,6,1,0,2,17,17,0,1,7,3,1,6,6,5,0,0,11,4,33,10,28,29,6,26,0,1,1,0,18,12,0,3,12,148,50,7,0.0,0.13393808714497454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040086274920596,0.09406126504046868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647798400492086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06891028105294814,0.0,0.09619171015946623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902560529307288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736421882822642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466417935529995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715820069862845,0.08075831385288779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733714376021208,0.0,0.0,0.10844164579691704,0.12849047592906965,0.28444662582242064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119308582776217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13395711644162306,0.07577068914291091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043704549959026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179880660955228,0.0,0.10047827533079468,0.0,0.0,0.0621257626929831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31938392736502264,0.2209094168733234,0.0,0.19963899985475456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263722838113658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138794544331864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13239520532262158,0.09023025981139468,0.1201473726466164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038766031984127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837014382206765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188003497715393,0.1081673825529532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307411199085088,0.0,0.07241857407482633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12805627255885382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008105029054428,0.1029105757265058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935107685724555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236355264658036,0.0,0.12365126405883432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499465920838384,0.1817202000271157,0.0,0.10407528608463293,0.12927511788525808,0.13125224048748804,0.22530327657095914,0.07243372363689274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801792850635608,0.0,0.15349826051501347,0.12295888937568755,0.0,0.11768229185572407,0.0,0.0976333067586264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620905396603274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229702949055732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iampizzza,2020/01/27,"Supportive spouse in need of support My husband was diagnosed with PTSD, OCD, depression and severe anxiety.  He was suicidal.  This came to light spring of 2018.  At this stage, he's gone through several CBT courses, lots of different meds, a few relapses  and still in therapy and seeing a psychiatrist. 
I have done my best to be supportive and helpful and whatever else he needs.  At this point, I am exhausted and I don't know where to turn.  Even just to vent a bit.  I have my own health issues-fibromyalgia- and I am just taking care of him.  BTW, he just broke his foot a few weeks ago and I fear another relapse looming, all the signs are there.  I am at the end of my energy and I don't know what to do.  Late 40s, live in Ontario, Canada.",2.491123152709364,4.740245013793103,3.9113546798029577,85.46732758620693,78.17241379310343,8.55665024630542,26.219211822660107,9.23628265651192,2.410645320197045,577,23,117,16,14,190,94,145,0.14400000000000002,0.731,0.124,-0.4767,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,1,6,0,13,4,1,0,1,21,26,9,1,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,11,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,5,2,14,5,18,20,7,17,0,2,1,0,9,8,0,1,6,77,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275142204167146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083911944534306,0.1100447482427342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15096155197287414,0.0,0.15704678901583835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16452591642024825,0.14666451813061168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389767259367394,0.14600457865977534,0.0,0.15029248555758376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720834915008435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016809861134364,0.0,0.12740827799098284,0.0,0.0,0.09501147505285043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187108378412174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290567317495132,0.0,0.0,0.09641952812447196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811224078831787,0.0,0.16226890637801406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702206076634254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222960058266973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15978476449037354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21332569516103986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598461294336714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681527870113085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462971315450587,0.0,0.0,0.3250187904047304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487868305101527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734839774336068,0.4897173451831162,0.0,0.0,0.10815719147698176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450485016999825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15646733884064395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538767983451136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Landon3476,2020/01/27,I really want to end it I think about ending it way to much. I think of all the ways to do it and it sometimes sounds better than living. I want to get help but I am to scared to get it. I think either people will think I am crazy or faking it. I don’t know what to do but I think one of these days I might end up doing it.,-1.356499999999997,0.25073273333333645,1.439583333333335,101.43937500000004,88.33333333333334,4.283333333333334,10.708333333333334,5.148860815047168,-1.7541666666666669,245,1,66,1,8,85,42,75,0.14400000000000002,0.77,0.086,-0.8051,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,1,0,8,0,0,0,1,15,18,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,9,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,10,1,12,16,3,7,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,4,48,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613274046005936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176397847144115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4846851050467911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190604081399498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226601979734053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10024812783500757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16107195397500482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19350888327358068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340928229374693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360618348599872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646058343216005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685693916321332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826248916369448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18040880615846994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5844069249178793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151810657643164,0.28957818148112524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,225rhodes,2020/01/27,"Possible to lose weight on Anti-Psychotic medication? I take Olanzapine, the worst when it comes to weight gain. All my life I was very fit. However when I started olanzapine I became overweight up quickly.  I lost weight a few times in between, but it always returns back eventually. 

is it possible to lose weight and maintain it on a drug like olanzapine? 

Any experience?",4.550649350649351,7.609569303030303,6.144718614718619,67.80136363636367,75.66666666666667,9.832034632034633,33.67099567099567,9.957137785484203,4.4488813852813855,298,16,47,10,7,101,47,66,0.172,0.722,0.106,-0.5489,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,4,4,5,0,0,3,0,2,8,0,0,1,4,6,4,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,4,6,1,8,4,3,13,0,3,0,0,0,5,0,0,8,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12596159883151833,0.0,0.0,0.10294466332652497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164030883401089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304018241812826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17555456863024566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480802299677136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692528458627276,0.0739573918507538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3387145250862322,0.16525087356692555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525010124868476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413199647076675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714865922309212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382010609172552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827181481652976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490565482982866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7373679124832597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MMarthaller,2020/01/27,"How do I open up to my counsellor. I have been seeing a counsellor for about a year now, after the death of someone I looked up to. It started as a way to get over that but then it uncovered a lot of unknown issues I have had, like ADHD and Anxiety.
I had to find a new counsellor after the winter break (I am in my final semester of college) because i need to develop a long term plan.
I have realized I don’t tend to tell the whole story because I am afraid the counsellor or the psychiatrist will be ... I don’t know how to word it like disappointment and disgusting together. 
So I am looking to you guys for help:

How do I open up more with my counsellor?",3.93311111111111,4.526590014814816,5.993333333333332,78.81000000000003,71.07407407407408,10.148148148148149,30.555555555555557,10.25414643259724,3.0896666666666666,512,21,106,14,9,180,78,135,0.102,0.8220000000000001,0.076,-0.5423,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,6,5,1,1,11,0,15,0,0,3,0,16,23,10,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,3,17,2,23,18,4,20,0,1,3,0,4,7,0,2,13,83,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666176201748393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16971275362357405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704723909799921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430231258618453,0.2027646237873985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590617827697852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21966393403278525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869972336158446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315511840638191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192160095904768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167669949198653,0.0,0.0,0.19632808337457813,0.37259210381516256,0.0,0.0,0.1886068371044125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16449713285992104,0.0,0.21426172739462826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767837591269704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18797069268622665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702482394425904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939045199992528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17609224357334746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476848451923076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428625360971808
mentalhealth,9golly,2020/01/27,"night panic, unknown cause, cry for help I’m not long on this subreddit and I’ve never made a reddit post so forgive me if I’m getting something wrong but I need help. I am diagnosed with BPD but it’s a messier part of my medical notes I’m having trouble with. I started going to the psychiatrist reporting visual and auditory hallucinations, delusions and paranoia. I was given no possible explanation for my symptoms but was put on an antipsychotic ‘for stress’. the antipsychotic did nothing but worsen my symptoms (according to my loved ones, not me) and I stopped taking it. Another slightly less apathetic psychiatrist told me I certainly sounded like I had symptoms of psychosis but I was far too ‘calm and gathered’ about them, whatever that means. I face my problems alone and without any idea of what they are or what causes them. It is common (at least 1-2 nights a week) that I will start to feel intense fear and dread in the night time. I will feel as though something has its eyes on me and that no matter what I mustn’t go to sleep. I shake, sweat, my heart rate is up significantly, my mouth is dry. I can never recognise these episodes while they are happening. One time I lay in the dark for 5 hours in a cold room shaking and intermittently weeping, practically paralysed with fear. I had no idea how much time had passed. I had a hallucination that I turned into an inhuman being. I felt like I’d seen something I wasn’t supposed to and my view of myself and the world felt permanently altered by the experience. I have just come out of the back of one of these and although it wasn’t as awful as the one from earlier I described I feel like I’m fighting a losing battle trying to cope with them alone. Does anyone know what I am experiencing, or where I could go? My friends are sweet and try to help but they all seem to think that the concepts I’m sharing are extremely alien. Which is why I’m here I suppose. 

If you did read, even if you can’t help, thank you for your time.",3.873092783505157,5.77850237886598,4.892358247422681,81.58276417525776,72.8917525773196,7.73659793814433,28.87757731958763,8.472884824447931,2.14258350515464,1585,65,306,28,32,518,215,388,0.156,0.7120000000000001,0.132,-0.8389,0,2,3,0,2,0,37.0,0,4,6,1,10,25,2,7,17,1,31,12,6,4,5,61,63,32,0,7,15,0,5,3,1,3,5,1,1,0,18,20,0,1,12,1,0,8,12,14,0,4,17,12,50,11,41,41,5,41,0,2,3,1,21,14,0,6,21,208,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18778580679925969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06164960094927184,0.09506135607388434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338920691150529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697093342533815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141788218976178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18625861411482295,0.0,0.07809263893878582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238192323882135,0.0,0.09958202498145688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201454696520947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933420699141124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05987783337847403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886795564820088,0.0,0.204027771976536,0.13751611203115338,0.06476509756838937,0.17408911757248993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004106905053123,0.0,0.04736433501514165,0.0,0.1545667154216608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016733744613096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10742851481676377,0.24306084865040806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927849570373315,0.0,0.0,0.20468054723232884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049822499880955336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328707156111444,0.0,0.0,0.08022824367146919,0.0,0.10142155325261984,0.0,0.0,0.08182112654684877,0.08578147275169147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875162102382423,0.0,0.09132699316674177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666430366244308,0.06722072477611046,0.13983992697561728,0.0,0.0,0.2552252509564585,0.0,0.08698745865102778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457250502334451,0.0,0.0,0.1063659942941753,0.0,0.09817227007017623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220170206154562,0.08682396891901728,0.0,0.0,0.08674612867129357,0.0,0.09113492873263007,0.0,0.0,0.09068113914422173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253036944143606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072207729587348,0.0,0.0,0.2093756535531383,0.0,0.0,0.12833442492110445,0.0,0.0,0.07579298209983087,0.10384683608144972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826807768438617,0.06816248549283135,0.0,0.0,0.08346442287054091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808909268624313,0.08906965528222684,0.0,0.21145038441657246,0.0,0.0,0.08662627220762982,0.0,0.12309976947936753,0.09860835482305504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271926115467985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818034863435643,0.0,0.0,0.08738973326810848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911876734437687,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brauntisaur,2020/01/27,"AMA or help with advice/encouragement I’m 32 m that’s dealt with major depression with psychotic features - as well as general anxiety disorder - for 3 years now. I believe it all started with the death of my mom (cancer) 10 years ago or the diagnosis of hsv2 (herpes) 3.5 years ago. Been through the hospital twice for psychotic episodes in the last 3 years, been on anti psychotic meds and antidepressants. Have gone to therapy and am active physically. I’m a big introvert and being social is something I struggle with. I think depression will always be a struggle. 

#ama #herpes #mentalhealth #psychosis",6.009360587002096,8.590160292452836,6.703333333333332,67.98055555555557,68.71698113207547,10.748846960167718,35.36268343815514,10.746095033038511,4.821980293501048,485,25,73,16,9,159,75,106,0.2,0.7340000000000001,0.066,-0.9337,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,6,0,8,1,0,0,1,13,13,7,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,1,3,0,4,1,15,7,2,13,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,2,9,44,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32721114614764696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535727118035233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119157879945132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20794134467777076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3179308105552115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21152726868561603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237099054737594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15044495829608362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050099030326412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21616008143662047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18814058676429493,0.0,0.1420870121117679,0.0,0.0,0.1306359264700317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38589443727933503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110659516839124,0.0,0.0,0.11826168147067433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16594593461653664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4754147603448631
mentalhealth,LouisBhoy,2020/01/27,"I’m worried about my mental health, it seems all over the place. I’m 17 and for a while now I’ve been worried about my mental health and I’m conflicted on what to do. I’ve talked to a couple of friends and they’re telling me things and saying I should go to the doctor but I don’t want to go to the doctor if what I’m experiencing is just being a teenager. 

I have anxiety which has always been known to me, my family, and my doctor. But things I have thought were normal are starting to feel like they’re not. Explaining it isn’t easy, I’m not sure what should be pointed out and what shouldn’t, these things seem so normal to me, even if they do feel horrible. 

To start I’m not trying to “self-diagnose” on here, I just want to know what could be possibly wrong with me, if anything. 
Quite a lot I shift from a depressed feeling to a up and jumpy, excited feeling. The depressed feeling can be  really bad, the worst part will normally last about 1-2 weeks. I will feel like everything’s hopeless and start to think of a world without me. This is extremely horrible, especially when the day before I could feel on top of the world. When like this sometimes, not an enormous amount though, I will hear things that aren’t there. This isn’t just voices, it can be car sounds, animals making noises, or just everyday city sounds. This i knew wasn’t normal, but since it didn’t happen a lot I kinda just dealt with it. 

On the other side there’s time’s when I’m seen as being overly happy and I’ve noticed that it can happen at times that I shouldn’t be happy, even if it’s a sad thing, I will feel happy but knowing that I’m sad at the same time if that makes sense. When I say happy I don’t just mean “oh today was a good day” I mean “ today was an excellent day. I can do anything”. It’s hard to explain properly why this happens. But like I said it can be at time that maybe be inappropriate, for Instance, I lost contact with my sister about a year ago and when I realised I sort of felt on an huge high. I went out more, started different hobbies and just enjoyed random things more. I felt extremely sad about the situation and it always felt there, but I wasn’t upset the way my family was. This was until a couple weeks went by and I went into a depressive feeling, I had a breakdown about it. I begged my friend to let me die and I started hating myself cause my sister was gone. Again everything felt hopeless.

Right now I’m in a mixed feeling, I feel happy but at the same time sad, it’s a weird feeling to explain. It’s kind of like listening to a song you love or doing something you love but has sad memories with it, if that makes sense. 

I know this has been quite long and I appreciate you reading this, if you have any advice or even similar experiences please comment. Hopefully I might gain some insight(without the self diagnosing)

Thank you!",3.929109207528065,4.958619385813152,4.872408642079503,85.23912439868343,71.40484429065744,7.991965566714491,26.20828761920837,8.331364938255728,1.554741952907419,2247,70,466,34,41,733,236,578,0.14800000000000002,0.672,0.18,0.9581,2,0,1,0,0,2,60.0,0,5,1,6,30,39,1,1,33,0,57,8,0,4,2,111,124,43,1,20,30,2,17,5,2,9,6,9,0,1,43,22,0,1,30,2,0,7,15,17,0,0,26,28,53,22,55,77,11,66,0,11,1,2,25,26,0,20,37,313,96,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05587347609614083,0.05068466224808384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515300587922676,0.0,0.0,0.03888285892530607,0.0,0.04374085398970365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410490107045504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047741067578770086,0.0,0.0,0.048654089217270435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058737342210933026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130362781596127,0.1265322774962208,0.0,0.11062483593708633,0.0,0.14774144408863654,0.11606850956482788,0.05934152036073272,0.05973862243769515,0.0,0.17557167727090994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329617607374087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277542429739132,0.05593085163821139,0.10780426625308373,0.0,0.3469297125516642,0.08169565133462918,0.2195985860337381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835083974380838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649909131364713,0.04795801872244688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516863965543057,0.304334111305446,0.051220070314989576,0.05645123154467435,0.0,0.12155463720613288,0.06444352656800237,0.0,0.0,0.0604114759910227,0.0,0.05679044834314005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059541871084422784,0.094270256628489,0.04660753148502665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058468165715563215,0.0,0.13967090380854585,0.0,0.0,0.050600546191202266,0.0,0.0,0.062416313741353174,0.0972210272604755,0.10321037838504656,0.0,0.11449985944336152,0.0,0.057442776772315136,0.12456675435982685,0.0,0.0,0.11524353092986928,0.06065660104268617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22408838267434866,0.0,0.06509729458671441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191797625189325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05973862243769515,0.06276404489086168,0.054051494456437324,0.06445936878740133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163123881271068,0.057193264615486024,0.0,0.03662955735149038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048829521520939716,0.05438917329241584,0.09094014948759846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041050278552582,0.11929781308048905,0.0,0.0,0.0472980599820643,0.06427023329376692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044018257345517016,0.05655029781899235,0.0,0.20235367555637546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05388939181085433,0.0,0.0,0.04595734294588499,0.04997590997812173,0.05264162832826355,0.0,0.0,0.2279183040005041,0.03663722005073088,0.0561768898344406,0.04539277962421327,0.1667041501561502,0.0,0.10839572142351464,0.0,0.0,0.038819967174990117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744988569621979,0.04538506948007713,0.0917291508490552,0.0,0.0,0.1590131566615777,0.05159406338594607,0.0,0.0,0.11023470121015026,0.0,0.0,0.11613364547452687,0.0,0.0,0.06251493907759285,0.0,0.036820623074007686
mentalhealth,wmally,2020/01/27,"Off my usual mood Context: I'm a 15 year old boy, who lives in the midwest. Back in 7th and 8th grade(I'm in 10th grade now), my life completely fell apart. My grades plummeted, my mom was stressed and overworked, my sister became a little curse and made everybody on edge, my dad became extremely aggressive and impulsive, I was bullied, my friends all abandoned, used, and or stabbed me in the back. It was a very dark time and I had 0 control over it. I tried to get rid of the pain by drinking, stealing medication, self harm and it made me super miserable. I almost killed myself twice, I was diagnosed with insomnia and my anxiety levels were out of control. Finally, when I got to high school things started to get a little better

Ok, now it's time for what's been going on recently. I've had trust issues ever since 8th grade, but I have a good, supportive group of friends, my grades got back on track, my dad calmed down, my mom got to relax a bit, my sister got some manners. I finally started to genuinely smile again, and I was in a good mood almost every day. But then about a week and a half ago, something happened, I don't know what, but all my enjoyment of life just, faded into thin air. It started with really bad mood swings(I would go from completely content and happy to extremely tired and depressed in the matter of minutes. Then I started having really bad stomach aches for no reason and I would get random panic attacks while I wasn't doing anything. Finally, this past week, I started having what seemed almost like flashbacks to 8th grade to the moments where my ""friends"" stabbed me in the back or abandoned me when Im around my new friends. I'm crying all the time for no reason when I'm alone, and no matter who I'm with and how many people im with I just feel super lonely and I just don't understand why.

I don't know if something's wrong with me, my brain is trying to tell me something, or what. But I just want to know if anybody else has had or has these kind of things happen and if they know what it it. All I want to do is move on from what happened and enjoy what I have right now but I just can't for some reason.",6.907482517482518,5.886066822843822,7.005675990675992,79.56697552447555,64.92074592074593,9.944522144522146,33.48601398601399,8.97023862654752,2.6680573426573417,1693,60,337,23,22,545,201,429,0.17600000000000002,0.685,0.138,-0.9541,0,3,4,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,1,5,21,38,3,3,16,1,27,10,2,9,5,78,61,37,1,7,17,6,2,1,4,2,7,0,0,2,20,26,1,4,10,2,0,4,8,16,0,2,17,2,45,19,47,42,7,68,0,5,0,0,17,26,0,14,39,218,65,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459255290961105,0.0,0.21889852416615027,0.07546865001400382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05574336101545824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05996366091673898,0.06486743416021573,0.0,0.08289718617979308,0.0,0.2241221288934344,0.1216824694795951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444529317191293,0.07955232754150438,0.0,0.0,0.08134411631141011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528001636054976,0.0,0.16345396870490253,0.0,0.0,0.08004141653841948,0.04699344437710662,0.0,0.0627605842409678,0.07395887643987678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138231040254224,0.0,0.0,0.06087136197229288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591273440158915,0.06139392665298968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036843946505001314,0.0,0.0,0.23946802259898475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22518868776623874,0.0,0.11421062592525527,0.0,0.08282444450086404,0.12223543472017034,0.2331148631260733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19330920165049828,0.07756870151557399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698840805524661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741859069878772,0.0760546333215194,0.0,0.0,0.08061698111888058,0.07588018323044499,0.16018406802631213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293679813714364,0.03559933062206709,0.1460645540967538,0.06434324857200273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13789779014989392,0.0,0.07387610589672439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340623875264382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17068283475698645,0.0,0.07744651364812143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037578830666866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646207794641773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753605038578483,0.08549419291693018,0.0,0.0,0.06956017774719789,0.05051707981141551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336144373226922,0.22475946757698012,0.07194776601735935,0.0,0.0,0.06222836085903935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374569829347451,0.0,0.06633574361197918,0.07601658925618764,0.0,0.0,0.06027666568950936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682906518738817,0.0,0.0,0.2578796013447557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834693597016135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268906120462874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06368931874632006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681972452970193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746869954276904,0.0837503562645812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894436196207307,0.0,0.0,0.07585753247516575,0.0,0.06293403723969099,0.08025314569715247,0.060123235711530026,0.08595816006932168,0.0,0.11689966484476848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575149406671914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035258195857138,0.07966906221542765,0.0,0.04692421609581904
mentalhealth,Wolfles54,2020/01/27,"Just a vent about never being enough romantically idk Okay so I don’t know where else to put this so I thought I’d put it here as I believe it stems from depression.

 Ever since I was young I’ve always internalized this thought that nobody could ever truly be satisfied romantically with who I am as a person, that whoever I’m with is always going to be left wanting something that I can’t provide and that’s going to lead to cheating or heartbreak. And I don’t understand why I have this thought process, I’m by no means a model but I’m relatively attractive and by most all accounts I’m a good and interesting person I’m 19 and male by the way. 

But no matter how many times this is told to me and no matter how true I know it is I just simply cannot comprehend the concept of somebody choosing me, of being someone’s first choice as a partner. 

I’ve always felt like I’d be the guy that would end up with a decent looking girl after she had exhausted all other options. And not in like I’m a pleasant surprise way but in a way she has become too weary to try harder than me and that I’ll “do”.

I just feel like I’ll be able to be fully in love with someone but I’ll never get that in return. I’ve just developed such a bleak outlook about my future prospects as far as love goes. It’s become something I ruminate on daily and I don’t know why, I feel like it can’t be true but even newton died alone.  I just don’t understand why I can’t get this out of my head that I’ll never find someone who is satisfied by what I have to offer. Like I know I do have a lot to offer somebody and that I’m a kind hearted person but I just feel like that won’t ever be enough for someone.

That just being a good person isn’t enough, that I have to always be funny and approachable and always be fun and basically have to mutilate my own personality to be desirable and that prospect is just so depressing to me that in order to be attractive, I can’t be me, I have to pretend. I have to seclude myself into a corner of my mind and let my real self out only when I’m alone like a husky kept in a kennel all day. And all the rest of the time put on a paper thin mask for everyone else. 

I don’t know this is just venting honestly but it sucks having this in my head all day",4.075499999999998,4.203437216666668,5.7687500000000025,82.20125,70.58333333333334,8.483333333333333,27.875,8.344100000000001,1.7594500000000002,1784,57,380,25,30,615,194,480,0.086,0.706,0.207,0.9967,0,2,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,2,25,28,2,0,21,1,50,6,3,3,13,86,84,35,1,4,18,0,5,7,1,2,1,0,0,10,31,23,0,1,17,1,1,7,19,6,0,1,8,6,39,22,54,57,12,46,0,3,1,2,19,18,1,4,24,262,70,2,0.07327545309087688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15178254136349048,0.0,0.0,0.30485523472884823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16185396195780802,0.0,0.08255634311214888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05850448681518089,0.0,0.0,0.0945132106332567,0.0,0.12622408075119804,0.0,0.07604835160625158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242447711330645,0.0,0.06490030213176917,0.22713939241849154,0.0,0.04839774568926715,0.19884552725867435,0.0,0.0700178355788889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115081229130046,0.1570439949877508,0.07035592609277055,0.0,0.06697243662830059,0.062328062966317314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656679981437553,0.0,0.08328825725004893,0.12291994704460595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255421891029201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15040350967993638,0.0,0.0,0.08683176472024019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07630510846362779,0.20135136350047667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961399418431987,0.07492911534925885,0.0,0.2505907956587063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06153292570189697,0.0,0.0,0.06229616986286394,0.13226791455842254,0.0,0.0,0.07428980839701313,0.0,0.0798184498511281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398731913816785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954364013623469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05572928399398787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199064963648565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209862075168353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340350765566021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644227835629627,0.0,0.0,0.06061421200441231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24834421446426805,0.11282204740819048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745175744198596,0.08545501192574925,0.0,0.0,0.0700178355788889,0.0,0.049749222721639424,0.0,0.0,0.15256466173050234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04321976073452481,0.17448793191582693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19835909744061755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520527795003028,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,annewitane,2020/01/27,"Is this a common thing? Hey, I’ve recently been diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety. I’m currently waiting for a therapist to be free, so I’ve not really had a chance to discuss my symptoms in depth with a professional yet... 

One of the struggles I’m facing is trouble sleeping. For instance, sometimes I’ll be extremely tired but as soon as I lie down my heart starts racing and I get this unsteady/anxious feeling in my body and stomach, like I’m about to go on a roller coaster ride or something (I hate roller coasters). I’ll Think TP my self ‘I have no reason to worry, I’m just going to sleep. There is nothing I have to do tomorrow, no pressure’ but it doesn’t work... I’m wondering if this is a common thing to experience, and if so if anyone has any advice?",4.19590909090909,5.337956902597405,5.731038961038963,78.9094155844156,70.88311688311687,8.716883116883116,32.18181818181819,9.095868883498916,2.8898909090909086,609,28,115,12,11,207,99,154,0.17800000000000002,0.7759999999999999,0.046,-0.9544,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,1,2,7,0,13,9,6,1,0,19,27,14,0,3,8,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,6,6,0,1,4,2,1,3,4,5,0,1,2,1,8,3,19,23,0,16,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,5,9,73,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17033220031848256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11853572353408635,0.0,0.13334548741975089,0.0,0.0,0.12188052136282215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936173933191378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501316128756466,0.17691940794810773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17050711161822932,0.0,0.0,0.0881355898833263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106897099545604,0.0,0.19812701855518053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720935075374101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065563529352872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515830418442122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16725365924226285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811591709992715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11166645672153454,0.17921811799821286,0.17210856599921334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18184172898262066,0.19691893397538024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3488686676700601,0.0,0.0,0.13419116102506085,0.1723955144584204,0.0,0.1233764183232209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18222503873504167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811732214343474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20238554568689465,0.2316055782082982,0.1116898167218998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20034192187624705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18903007891128512,0.1268986278633823,0.17701869247087207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Evanshields00,2020/01/27,"Anyone else with autism feel like this at times? I was diagnosed when I was 17. I am 20 now. I've had the help of Medicine and gained a lot of self-control to really control my autism, but there are days like just now, where I feel like SUPER AUTISTIC. Like things I say and or do that I normally don't and I just feel weird. I had my first anxiety attack today too. That was fun. I also got diagnosed with Bi-polar when I was 17 as well. I stopped taking my medicine and prob need to get on it again but it makes me super tired and I don't want to miss work to go to the doctor. I need to find a new one because I moved as well. Sorry for the super unorganized post. Anyone else feel this way sometimes?",0.4541023489932883,2.528875966442953,2.217713926174497,95.74925545302014,84.63758389261744,5.335738255033559,18.0373322147651,6.6274283507984215,-0.17237953020134267,545,13,126,6,16,179,87,149,0.102,0.638,0.26,0.9832,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,7,13,13,1,0,5,0,11,4,0,2,0,25,24,13,0,4,5,0,4,4,0,0,4,1,0,0,7,7,0,2,5,0,0,2,2,3,2,2,7,5,18,10,15,17,1,18,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,2,15,80,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061247008634321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015194977646992,0.0,0.0,0.18558182290945216,0.2719453454972821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509718925047522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089616338560209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976814549443284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558419844964515,0.0,0.0,0.2693869854505404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582990783585136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22171716893664534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26839995843235426,0.1896099581184177,0.0,0.0,0.12129060622634058,0.11287940117895605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933325136308482,0.0,0.07541970788266793,0.0,0.1061368717051471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894983382863958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593332084521792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282164109067125,0.0,0.0,0.08858208565959054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104515813109833,0.0,0.19679919104621146,0.0,0.12816799262797487,0.0,0.0,0.13002341054748648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992481721001498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12709537797751105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501466995916196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553289957256974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844098781437925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124933121743934,0.14855316710036615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109479079101486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977817145952314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881637707963658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738176123917069,0.15252568109836676,0.12578948734457493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782732605286863,0.10533560823293438,0.0,0.0,0.23863672439407385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661133058944353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,silvi88,2020/01/27,Intense dreams affecting my everyday life Has anyone ever experienced having these intense dream that have you feeling what you just dreamt is real? Does it affect your everyday life? I honestly want to know. Lately it’s been happening a lot. Just last night I dreamt I dropped out of college and I woke up to completely regret it. But my day was spent with little to no motivation to do school work which is what I love doing now that I’m where I want to be. I keep contemplating if I want to push myself or give up. It’s like the classic angel and devil speaking to you at the same time.,3.413017241379311,5.421414267241381,4.701241379310347,82.01789655172416,74.43103448275863,7.743448275862068,25.393103448275863,8.548686976883017,1.845899310344828,469,16,89,9,10,155,82,116,0.076,0.722,0.20199999999999999,0.8584,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,4,0,2,6,5,0,0,3,0,10,3,0,3,1,23,22,5,0,5,5,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,10,4,0,1,3,2,1,1,1,2,0,0,4,3,15,3,13,17,2,17,2,1,0,1,7,6,0,3,10,64,25,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423425511752045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312733190627993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422554740627969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930305318023883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19952670853045887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153157947636258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21159987349001053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19505764747964874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196061118330012,0.0,0.0,0.12122467738016728,0.17980166289430322,0.2488231869516419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3116035270791825,0.10776395986899563,0.2210785212939959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18752872993650985,0.19908153328763464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20699883774329025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510676643098021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22323814331730246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12862163025770593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3903103604867113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058444060704832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mhthrowaway0987,2020/01/27,"What is this I am feeling - affected all my life? Hello,

​

I've had this feeling my entire life - and well obviously it's preventing me from fully living my life.  I don't know where else to ask, so I was hoping that one of you guys can either point me in the right direction.  Maybe you know what feeling I am dealing with or what issue I am dealing with.  I do see a therapist for other stuff but unless you feel what I am feeling, it's hard to relate.

​

Basically, my entire life feels fake.  Everything, from friends, from work, from going to the gym, from playing video games, from playing sports, from my relationships, everything is fake.  I don't feel a lot of emotions and I feel like a zombie most of the time.  My emotions are muted and it seems like my life is just going through the motions.

Every once in awhile, however, I do feel something else.  I will feel this sense of despair, loneliness, a yearning for something, and vulnerability.  This emotion that I feel (not sure what it's called) is probably the realest emotion I ever feel.  When I feel this, I feel real and alive.  Obviously it also feels shitty, and so when that emotion really hits me hard, I have a tendency to shutdown by mindlessly playing video games or something.  

But the thing is, I've felt this emotion my entire life.  And while sometimes it causes me to shutdown, it's also the realest emotion I can ever feel and so I'm not exactly in a hurry to get rid of it, because I feel alive.  Unfortunately, it can prohibit me from being productive, and, not knowing what to do with that emotion and not know what I can do to make myself feel better, I just go about my normal life.  I do homework, read, go to the gym, hang out with friends, eat, etc... basically go about a ""normal"" life.  

But everthing I do, hanging out with friends, going to shows, etc...always has this fakeness to it.  It all feels like a huge distraction and hence my entire life feels fake.

​

So what is going on?  When i feel that emotion, what should I do?  How do I feel better when I am feeling that way?  Heck, what is it that I am feeling?  I have never been able to find someone else the feels the same way I do.",3.919303675048358,5.535475695035462,4.919256393724479,82.62454545454547,72.19148936170214,7.491338921126156,28.657425316999785,8.101407402915765,1.9537555555555564,1701,67,325,25,33,556,166,423,0.087,0.767,0.146,0.9686,1,0,3,0,0,0,85.0,0,3,0,3,19,21,0,1,18,0,38,10,0,4,9,86,83,29,0,5,13,0,28,3,3,2,9,0,1,1,39,18,1,1,32,12,0,10,7,7,1,1,4,29,48,14,43,75,7,31,0,2,1,0,15,10,1,6,12,233,87,3,0.04739645059050057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758058488267147,0.0394376437417902,0.1540621032383384,0.1727756258024878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04430928325159199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028892436362019637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383661783118974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839707529376063,0.0,0.0,0.04868921070963473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977273187752891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048498401490943664,0.11878095806597885,0.4798316477382238,0.0,0.0,0.10571914218860444,0.0,0.08574560611422721,0.039933553814648665,0.0,0.08519374729993097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5991267380638612,0.06772006754422445,0.045508025322876976,0.0,0.04331949718061708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985514046272482,0.0,0.024762689217179498,0.0,0.18855546585549768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046929937743942315,0.0,0.0,0.08491582023487064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04707536980042477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0494695804320307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419139888109076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012976325847509,0.06946653501397562,0.0,0.04185193421464048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0402947673789311,0.0,0.0,0.031637498808629615,0.0,0.04761610513410624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03655506459388988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287691671876304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050475673026073684,0.032117061549905644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044804965694724204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051101390105671225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04740927674315111,0.05394753717555798,0.03036337990375398,0.0,0.0,0.05088605030772595,0.0,0.040476309834481215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03776883468148464,0.04314794853139937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0401588587780355,0.10946430973690938,0.04687630155810856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054257596424669235,0.0,0.0,0.04467059376759416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05503093221668128,0.031488095733635826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027637251491479945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524219271111572,0.0,0.0,0.042615101165747835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03450518051888652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727756258024878,0.0
mentalhealth,scaredofselfThrowawa,2020/01/27,"Serious post: I want to kill someone, idk how to stop the feeling I've played around with the idea since I was an early teen. I have thought of the different ways, how I'd most like to try it. 

I feel like it's going to happen in my lifetime, I'm just kind of pushing the feeling away each time like I'm joking around with myself but I'm not. 

I'm not cruel or sadistic, I would never hurt an animal, I'm not sexually into it or any aspect of it. 
I just want to do it and be done. But I know I shouldn't start thinking like that or accepting that it's just what's gotta happen.",2.2774453193350794,2.8902792992126014,4.314908136482938,89.2602537182852,74.90551181102363,7.219247594050744,23.559930008748907,7.3871296695380915,0.7681573053368331,449,12,105,5,9,155,75,127,0.081,0.721,0.198,0.8908,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,8,12,2,0,6,0,7,0,0,2,1,35,25,8,1,4,11,0,3,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,1,8,2,0,2,5,4,0,0,3,3,10,8,15,18,2,14,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,4,9,64,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364642345408805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237234734198637,0.0,0.0,0.1708294515220278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18996717861422008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860688819720398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758067393486451,0.12989496372532458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033346593903618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3215723832894706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946461454750302,0.20525694591865734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20116110250306227,0.18934151471464386,0.09992560897338001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35531971040919474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402337286890431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741369459270148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15040653168877405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540587212443866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869582611401453,0.0,0.0,0.1520128438021056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650535351002655,0.0,0.14434779247985538,0.10602292378426993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234464294154225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214488783984368,0.14432327443326368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291624153891691,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mhuyfara366,2020/01/27,"Help with anxiety? I have never seen a doctor for anxiety before. When I was younger I had little signs of anxiety but didn’t really know. As of the past couple years my anxiety has been horrible sometimes, it really eats at me and I feel like it holds me back. Simple stuff that shouldn’t make me anxious because I know for a fact I have nothing to worry about but my head reassures me otherwise. It’s just been taking a toll on me. I just want to feel normal. 

Has treatment or medication worked for you? I want to say something to my doctor but I’m worried about taking medication that might not work or have a negative effect.",2.3311662531017383,4.806380354838711,4.212258064516128,81.85184863523575,80.12903225806451,7.6863523573201,24.054590570719604,8.617729084823388,2.0226533498759305,500,18,93,12,13,169,78,124,0.166,0.7240000000000001,0.111,-0.8021,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,3,6,2,0,0,5,0,12,6,1,2,2,25,23,8,0,4,8,0,2,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,6,2,1,1,5,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,6,4,17,2,15,15,0,8,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,3,6,68,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4382118125134703,0.16178313313283954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011733341161244,0.0,0.08729765011435378,0.0,0.12185859829754905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845580734468634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931568389170233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653649942887345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14481951109504013,0.10230710017185386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697168394331636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598862475453962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574056298070311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996370021461501,0.14353102286243655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955917758849732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885319466534518,0.0,0.15191998246124122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11045005685363156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14031244159929662,0.13741096640066422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367072733598972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18348412587396148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388394402000925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024773510139964,0.1416353719983982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393773821556298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21534766388374185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689343826696005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085127843375692,0.2908672935899279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222060444301317
mentalhealth,SlayerL99,2020/01/27,"Why only some of us have to face the burden of mental sickness? It's unfair. Title. I've had many illness and since I can recall and I've always wondered, why me? Why can other people just live their lives freely and calmly, but I have to be constantly under the pressure and suffering of my illnesses? It's unfair, and I don't understand, because I think I'm a good person, I don't think I deserve suffering this much. Sure, treatment helps, but still some symptoms never leave me.
What do you guys think?",3.1003030303030314,5.266417010101012,4.314141414141417,83.72454545454549,75.86868686868685,6.420202020202023,24.131313131313128,7.3871296695380915,1.266422222222222,400,13,72,5,9,131,66,99,0.235,0.632,0.134,-0.9237,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,1,1,0,2,7,0,1,3,0,9,5,1,0,2,17,15,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,12,3,6,13,3,4,0,2,0,0,6,1,0,3,3,48,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479602062915051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10839721744985156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19215988649914256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14914669858168367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17606942532632144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918877331291675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882853503251412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31403604437629684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802812306233673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17920039890056147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071791412261832,0.0,0.13714548804496413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352398682535733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327776627306858,0.15526527283757238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14709426459983285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14200701433612056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16759293005158707,0.18482271808747305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418189842704815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851165426314288,0.21389516289031446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4813637693184941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19283784164169945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,opentilltenthirty,2020/01/27,"I dont know what to call this and its ruining my life I'm really picky. 
Like, extremely picky.

I CANNOT wear cool tones. Sometimes it's acceptable depending on if the color is more warm leaning or cool leaning, but if my outfit doesnt fit my niche than I'm ugly. I cant wear pants that are too tight. Also, no jeans. Ever. Unless they're an acceptable style or shade. 

If I end up going outside and I feel a bit off with how I look, I get irrationally irritable and start picking at my skin. I get the urge to rip off what I'm wearing. I feel violent towards myself. I feel like something bad will happen to me or someone I love. I thought my shoes didnt match my outfit the other day and I couldnt walk. I froze. I had to spend the day thinking about how stupid i look.

I've gotten better with colors. I used to feel sick if something in my possession was blue. I couldnt buy any products with blue packaging at all. Now, if theres a problem, I make sure to pair it with something that's a complimenting color. If its leaning more towards teal, I'm a bit more okay with it. The WORST color is purple. Cant stand it. 

I love orange. I love green. I love yellow. Brown, gold, white. Pink is okay sometimes. Red is okay sometimes. Some things are okay sometimes if presented well.

If specific things remind me of certain colors, I wont touch it. My meals need to coordinate well throughout the day. 

If a task includes numbers, I feel a lot better if it's in odd numbers. If I'm washing dishes, I make sure I stop dispensing soap on an odd number. If I'm buying a meal, I'll get 3 things. If I'm texting something, I'll do it in groups of 3. I really like the number 3. 

I need to make such an effort to be myself. All the time. Everything NEEDS to coordinate with who I am. I need to buy certain looking things. I need to look a certain way. I need to do certain things. I need to go certain places. I need to eat certain things. 

I just cant tell when it's just preference, or a problem.",0.5090772357723559,2.7919311170731724,2.6495426829268323,91.28033028455286,86.60975609756098,5.367886178861788,21.468495934959353,6.816661863887847,0.5656544715447156,1538,53,327,20,48,518,188,410,0.142,0.654,0.203,0.9734,0,0,4,0,0,0,60.0,0,0,0,3,14,36,2,0,20,6,23,16,5,8,11,77,66,27,0,26,21,0,10,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,23,10,4,2,11,0,4,3,11,7,2,0,5,30,47,29,38,56,10,30,0,1,18,4,8,14,0,20,14,195,70,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370661005642518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05417368888774311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651542128497567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14091120416922093,0.17394310300419602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134500573060012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541284671691914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336464456142717,0.0,0.0,0.08151531313121232,0.0,0.0,0.07055792531975208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205990009105788,0.0,0.0,0.07159612249562541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014004674676844,0.056911386163574114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486215855297085,0.0,0.09054883324163436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07044588011752106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04378079608952233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05626845447089452,0.11675820603823304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26758800398588833,0.0,0.0,0.06772678025390765,0.2875964928072092,0.0,0.1595273581886226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4725538624428193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08323105954577316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15245379416881027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206853605427177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749834731965314,0.2453144079140401,0.3151556572977685,0.0,0.05638600333345267,0.0,0.0,0.066601979070864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501631941169271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962912383159622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175480310350706,0.051044944111564065,0.0,0.06324366029349672,0.04645223636566125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880340312068302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323291810628992,0.0,0.0,0.1432535180068936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kakarotyouclown,2020/01/27,"I want to hold on to my emotions. So I’ve recently gone through some heartbreak and it was enough to get me feeling again. Even if it’s pain, it’s invaluable to me right now. I don’t want to lose touch with my emotions again. I want to be able to cry if I need it, be able to express when I need to. Does anyone have any advice? It’s important to me. Thank you so much for your time.",-0.2222619047619041,1.6786070119047634,1.6761904761904771,99.66880952380954,86.0238095238095,5.161904761904762,20.047619047619047,6.42735559955562,-0.1144666666666665,295,9,74,3,9,97,52,84,0.14800000000000002,0.74,0.11199999999999999,-0.7964,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,1,7,4,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,12,14,6,0,7,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,2,12,1,14,10,3,9,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,3,6,49,17,0,0.3913390081077521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19120597476770995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306197254983398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13681666677704732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21493376227110847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17123170159106593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4402037113307476,0.0,0.20217890344307984,0.0,0.12923786202454166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893638046041213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222923990719457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218904124715523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383959950128974,0.29017291587333155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082061480391192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19320002950834603,0.0,0.0,0.16710068734200373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801461903058568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140964613462844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34623282933904764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DatElonMusketeer,2020/01/27,"Things will get better If you feel down, depressed, anxious, worried about something. Just remember it won’t last forever & things do certainly get better.

This is the case for myself. On the 6th of January my life turned upside down, very fast, very quickly...

I was in a very controlling relationship, very abusive & was always questioned & harassed about anything & everything. My now ex-girlfriend (girlfriend at the time) was going through some legal issues surrounding her children & her ex-husband. Her Ex-husband was very jealous of the relationship between myself & her, so he decided to take her to court & then gained full custody of his children, but unfortunately I came under fire from her for being the cause, when it had nothing to do with me. Her jealous ex-husband took her children, he claimed legal aid (UK) under Domestic Violence even though he was lying through his teeth (was proven) & she couldn’t afford a lawyer.

So she started to blame me for her loosing her children, which really was not fair at all. It progressively got worse, with me having to pay her bills, as she was paying for a solicitor. For some context, I kind of knew this was going to happen & I tried to tell her several times, but she basically had her head up her arse & wasn’t having any of it. 

Then on the 6th of January, we had a massive argument (basically because I had enough of her blaming me for shit all the time & I snapped) 

I packed my rucksack with a few items such as underwear, socks, clothes etc, but in the process of doing so, she smashed my mobile phone & laptop. She then threatened to call the police, so I put my motorcycle leathers on, jumped on the bike & left immediately & drove to my friends house (45 minutes away) as fast as my motorbike could manage. 

Anyway, the next day the police arrived & I was arrested for Criminal Damage. I spent all day in the police cells & was interviewed (which was hilarious if I’m honest). During the police interview, it turns out that she told them I smashed my phone & that I smashed the laptop also. For context, she had given me this laptop as a Christmas gift.

So during the police interview I was being questioned & the interviewing officer asked me about the laptop & burst out laughing, simply for the reason being was she had told them a complete web of lies to make me look bad. I explained everything & I even cracked a few jokes during the interview (yes I have weird coping mechanisms) was released with No Further Charge (rightfully so) & I left, or at least tried to....

Turns out that I had a diary that I used to write all my thoughts into (mental health worries etc). Turns out she had given this to the police officers & they then arrested me again under the mental health act & took me to hospital. I was nearly sectioned but manage to not get sectioned as I had to lie through my teeth to be able to be released. So I finally was released from Police Custody & custody of the hospital.

I then returned back to my friends house (where I was arrested from) just trying to piece together everything that had happened over the past 2 days. 

Now onto the good bit....

I’m very lucky to have a very small group of biker friends who I know I can rely on, as I was broke & penniless as she had taken everything from me... my friends gave me a spare phone & my friend is putting me up for free which is awesome.

My finances are now sorted & it’s so nice to have like £1,000 per month that is MINE, I don’t need to spend it on anyone else. Just going to use some of it to pay for a food shop for where I’m staying & to put money on electric as it is the correct thing to do, because I’m a thoughtful person.

But I’m now getting help from my local authority,
I’m registered with a local Doctors surgery & everything is slowly coming together & I am so much happier for leaving that absolutely terrible situation. 

Without my friends, I honestly wouldn’t be here right now.

TL;DR Had enough of being in an abusive relationship, so left. Restarted my life & couldn’t be happier. 

Also, on a side note, if your partner is controlling, leave, run, run, run away... you may not think you are able to... but I managed, I left that terrible situation with absolutely zero cash to my name, but my friends were kind enough to help me out & slowly but surely, I’m back to being me again. 

If anyone reading this is feeling depressed or you’re in a controlling relationship & you need to vent, talk, discuss how you feel, I’m only a private message away, message me anytime & I will reply to your message as quickly as I can. I hate seeing people treated like shit. 

Just remember, someone cares about you & you should know that someone is me, I have never met you, I don’t know you. But I care :)

Would also like to say I apologise for any spelling mistakes and the possible rabbiting on & not using correct paragraphing etc. I’m using my mobile phone & I haven’t slept for over 48 hours so I’m sorry.",7.123543656745879,6.945517521966528,7.2809094497513245,74.9892504144628,64.15690376569036,10.102123628325572,35.82016262729928,9.647358000301196,3.387970103418331,3965,170,718,69,53,1283,378,956,0.138,0.741,0.121,-0.9475,1,0,1,0,1,0,206.0,1,11,3,7,43,42,6,0,45,1,79,12,6,11,9,93,143,49,0,13,24,0,5,3,9,7,5,1,0,6,30,16,1,3,17,4,11,16,15,15,0,1,50,8,122,28,130,74,23,105,0,4,2,0,96,54,2,14,37,495,152,21,0.044821789559384144,0.053106491314602544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05376595337545944,0.01864765975605321,0.8984412198330667,0.0,0.03048035390503698,0.0,0.0,0.025317932093468047,0.0,0.03134043741843748,0.02296261009881166,0.018442256871698023,0.0,0.02095116137059479,0.0,0.06316732010119391,0.0344651894872108,0.01871216103734256,0.02732294689459077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0396412304611818,0.02446689272856472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022884029258315168,0.02563209329747613,0.04569880167147402,0.023022162303828246,0.0,0.01930500145646586,0.023497396791390915,0.0,0.07540717239746139,0.01789327589047885,0.0,0.0,0.043359519377502966,0.0,0.03860494166948595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02293850043793708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01872142688522473,0.0,0.0,0.06946933535164695,0.07498221519555026,0.02960436927960815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070733582574926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03399486531797069,0.0,0.0,0.024550039795270054,0.0,0.0,0.02709934292516001,0.0,0.1212022119991336,0.0,0.04683507018727278,0.0,0.038209883887715616,0.018797195263504717,0.017924039829519692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03963576048113019,0.0,0.0,0.02212611885306885,0.02300004358726454,0.047643466340253696,0.0,0.0,0.03004310073888066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022070217027019147,0.05171832726286859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023391151616740616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04667499646329077,0.036949325026161065,0.01826787038773003,0.0,0.047459803387880216,0.09739801100611427,0.0,0.03165895550358886,0.032846493514010644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018819507286861333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.014959446288894418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04516982167844595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017888162400742317,0.0,0.01647458629367644,0.033234789023450034,0.01728466364193752,0.0,0.023834240844260533,0.0,0.0,0.021503857966289192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017044495353551608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021393734912817618,0.015536892645427585,0.01956832889311841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025264916565285997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675874175527903,0.05021066225494147,0.0,0.022416959486097263,0.0,0.014356993059628618,0.023042132362778217,0.0,0.09624365580059943,0.05077435008509685,0.038277563381616656,0.0,0.01782204303626286,0.0,0.0,0.01785858159108613,0.0,0.0,0.025317932093468047,0.04600892287628448,0.0,0.050381569424113176,0.0,0.0,0.0379773568414614,0.01725300169866292,0.0,0.025087161898885418,0.015862546673308445,0.023887031970719008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021122003107814327,0.0,0.016850203804060368,0.018013028314310134,0.019588109837623373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04466640802259686,0.014359996462556975,0.022018590334719645,0.03558349426767314,0.03920391890904062,0.0,0.0,0.04282914071958503,0.049798657407993975,0.045646579396925235,0.09750647227946667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742327022754504,0.0,0.12943934676411847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02160330283297797,0.0,0.0,0.045518702998995235,0.02283861639681119,0.01592005665150966,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lesmexyfish,2020/01/27,"I always feel like I'm never good enough I always mess everything up, no matter how small. Felt like shit and went to make soap from a kit with my boyfriend to feel better. I went first. The container melted in the microwave, so he didn't get to try and i had to scrape soap off the tray, then in an effort to make something good from my fuck up i turned the soap into a bar and it looked like crap and smelled nothing like i wanted it to. Smelled like, well, microwave. Can't even make soap. He took it home with him because i don't use bar soap but i could kinda tell he didn't really want to. I appreciate that he was trying to make me feel better though. It's just so many little things that make me feel this way and I'm not gonna keep ranting on and on so thanks for listening. I don't really want advice. Just a rant.",1.1200608519269757,3.0706918850574714,2.4396957403651136,95.80134888438135,81.29885057471266,5.4734279918864095,17.706558485463148,6.522977012572876,-0.308773766058148,644,13,148,6,17,207,98,174,0.11,0.741,0.14800000000000002,0.8264,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,4,9,15,3,0,8,0,8,6,2,7,1,34,35,13,0,4,4,0,5,5,0,1,1,1,1,0,8,9,2,2,5,2,0,3,8,4,1,1,8,9,15,11,21,25,1,17,0,0,1,1,7,10,3,1,8,82,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327304291011168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099350424625936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690032008784814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22314015562827486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072110074410832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303474364226145,0.0,0.08332137387608908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337615067762295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551424177761031,0.09012211371290407,0.121124493277261,0.0,0.0,0.10730375482221316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11662432617097478,0.06590855486109991,0.0,0.0,0.21161851071100515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653947771313548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212857380273993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30815439670978645,0.12643618225919212,0.0,0.0,0.1059348495488779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42103299193569016,0.12789705000667526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972952274733537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104503713387095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161630788369029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949192156076866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711700265874544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026130689639327,0.11614265231327532,0.0,0.0,0.08380894606923821,0.0,0.12394246134251037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401581135956449,0.17129614313229438,0.1372157797959257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895373558561663,0.0,0.0,0.22322092434534951,0.1001325854126047,0.0,0.0,0.11342466516703828,0.2338859992731433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anusAAmeatings,2020/01/27,Is therapy worth trying? I’ve been questioning my thoughts a lot lately and I feel like my mental health has been affecting my life. I’ve been thinking about going to therapy but I just wanted to know other peoples results/opinions on it. Is it affordable?,2.8818750000000013,5.857643437500003,4.24666666666667,78.86500000000002,83.375,7.366666666666666,28.83333333333333,8.344100000000001,2.9321833333333336,207,10,33,5,6,68,36,48,0.027000000000000003,0.8909999999999999,0.081,0.3313,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,1,0,11,12,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,5,1,4,8,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,2,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301815840999433,0.1839324033666021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632278040378635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736722970736922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14149553523268565,0.0,0.2904307173828388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18185450684348414,0.12578395348199814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21888676948719465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594632550214972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784931881024373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28841871367556743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5888652695610006,0.0,0.0,0.1649725983332864,0.0,0.204397735139496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748012224509171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15185899592246174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mimi_1234567,2020/01/27,"I don’t know what to do anymore I am a 16 year old,  and I feel so apathetic about everything. I used to be someone who found people to be interesting. I used to truly love people. Even though I have social anxiety being around people truly did make me happy. It would make me uncomfortable because of my irrational fears, but I deeply cared about others.

I would never harm another person or anything along those lines. But, I feel like I am losing the empathetic person that I once was. I feel scared and so worried. I find myself not wanting to be around people at all, and I would rather just stay home alone, all day, everyday. 

Apathy is taking me over. My apathy isn’t allowing me to enjoy life or feel remotely satisfied or happy with anything. I don’t care about others like I used to. Sometimes I get in this really mean state of mind. I feel disgusting for it. I am becoming this really vile person.

I don’t want to talk to anyone. I don’t want to see anyone. I don’t want to do anything. The only thing keeping me afloat currently is my grades. I force myself to make good grades, because it is the only thing currently giving me satisfaction in my life. 

I am not trying to victimize myself. I know that it is my fault for feeling this way. I know that I need to become more self aware, and fix myself. I realize this, and yet I am still in the same place.",2.6355555555555554,4.761264777777779,4.486444444444448,82.13300000000002,77.14814814814815,7.727407407407409,22.28148148148148,8.608573733854374,1.5854637037037045,1070,31,205,23,25,363,134,270,0.136,0.647,0.218,0.9755,2,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,1,13,18,3,2,5,0,27,3,0,7,3,52,57,13,0,9,9,0,6,2,0,3,2,0,1,4,18,9,0,1,13,0,0,0,9,8,0,0,3,7,44,10,30,47,4,20,0,1,1,1,9,8,0,3,11,149,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622313111541857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742058236898576,0.07107323020630757,0.0,0.09213829883870472,0.12992479190865486,0.0,0.2293624387933754,0.16541299257800451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326989927468345,0.2052158945701023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18944876928068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059917016655583376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06136387739083171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349838565519188,0.0,0.0,0.10454565969978484,0.281857955167002,0.06637243337232424,0.0,0.0,0.08491487219694331,0.0,0.0,0.10186719905670907,0.0,0.0,0.04853981987284624,0.08912439558300272,0.0,0.07792557744074279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978014270826589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319281037103798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257957994154859,0.0,0.0,0.15317697392331325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124523920745648,0.09077886135322867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393862649043097,0.0,0.0,0.08385175772250879,0.0,0.1860474619613852,0.0,0.0,0.10120243206445594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09380909617609952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888900416972983,0.07165523240491478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748975965821936,0.0989424070688784,0.0,0.14131918341991248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576387198318728,0.2433671577866525,0.09706753475186924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903658591624396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301562987809882,0.0,0.07403446435755844,0.0,0.09692175802254027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470649275224677,0.07871938925084734,0.0,0.09188691963057227,0.0,0.0,0.0990259841199684,0.07419526344203653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06985413744011862,0.0746747380751182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12344592153498835,0.0,0.09128017995298922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307742560945068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407241993521973,0.0,0.0,0.21919468031442704,0.07374486771214134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435107647248613,0.0,0.1979943693834232,0.0,0.0,0.059828750044401184
mentalhealth,wilbert17,2020/01/27,Need advice I’m currently on leave from work because my mental health is really bad. I suffer from depression and anxiety. Work was stressing me out and making me anxious. I’ve been on leave for 3 weeks now and I’m so bored and I feel so useless I’m going insane. I feel like because I feel useless my depression is getting worse. I want to go back to work because I’m so bored and I want something to keep me occupied but I’m scared about going back before I’m better.,1.1392970946579195,3.5147031546391787,3.298575445173384,87.11959700093723,84.4639175257732,6.0014995313964405,23.25117150890347,7.348242739294969,1.207338144329897,374,14,73,6,11,127,53,97,0.314,0.61,0.076,-0.9552,1,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,4,7,12,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,15,22,9,0,3,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,10,0,0,2,3,11,2,10,20,0,11,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,6,37,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554755490613555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171487735540185,0.1797433446121986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446838236335549,0.13284601591303594,0.290966764664932,0.0,0.13538662284263675,0.0,0.0,0.14071542891676525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740737793519272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241344781609148,0.11366463243955778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312578738193407,0.0,0.2712690871381901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16912115802548675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141982031026604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369384104547705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773065853344792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620381236452336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16034040209222186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179743297063527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192672693744803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929184518397624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248678993485786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18225422173949068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18768848379329245,0.0,0.12762442118912493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3474909700920093,0.0,0.16214157152814798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IyaAwful,2020/01/27,"Is anything real? Sometimes I wonder to myself if anything is real or truthful, even myself. Sometimes I can't bear to look in the mirror because I don’t even know if I’m being honest with myself. I use to think that having another side that hides from yourself could simply not happen to me, but maybe I’m wrong. Every action or I make or thought I think is questioned by another side of me, it whispers and tears at my insides, trying to force its way through my teeth. Am I an awful person? Even now while writing this I question my sanity and if I actually need help or not. I feel as though I’m in need of help, but I also feel as if I have nothing to be helped. My friends say I’m beautiful and smart, but as much as I want to believe that I can’t. The other part of me says that they are lying and that everyone is always lying. I always fall prey to these thoughts. I want to rip it out so bad, it’s like a whispering worm that slithers and tightens around my brain. I just want it to stop.",3.2178260869565207,4.211150492753628,4.670260869565219,86.1584347826087,73.05797101449275,6.87265700483092,26.360386473429948,7.0316486544052195,1.1724566183574885,780,26,161,7,15,261,119,207,0.141,0.7140000000000001,0.145,-0.41200000000000003,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,9,7,0,0,4,1,14,2,2,2,1,45,35,24,0,10,14,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,0,1,14,8,0,1,10,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,2,7,29,5,26,30,2,13,0,0,1,0,11,7,0,11,4,116,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.11959172434922942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800368438136353,0.20394386184370453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570100152559623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20169743210307,0.10909603163987408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232464650579433,0.07470571883456394,0.0,0.0,0.13807257934213438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680701883334187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978466958824293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428305807798701,0.0,0.10325418064305933,0.1171023666249092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393054868548185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468230292880453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837110615193696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24642928656736104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067350614294531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05987204134374927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291165337335018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180348867128635,0.0,0.1231185670039812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008880457289242,0.1817394597947592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759062251122225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271037606931466,0.0,0.0,0.1070064720318282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745694768127309,0.0,0.0,0.27897886447210657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19491433940284608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424113882488447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245780351919426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15705097438219526,0.12040535927730865,0.1945830022045228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832038247153445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584438565842466,0.0,0.0,0.2168505877879992,0.09727497575389256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290091680640914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339898617032718,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arejohanson,2020/01/27,"Happy and sad at the same time I pretty much have the life I’ve always dreamed of. I travel to cool places for a job I adore, make good money to support myself, have significantly improved family relationships over the last couple of years, and have lots of strong friendships with people I genuinely love. I have fun hobbies and exercise regularly. And yet recently it feels like a part of me is missing. When I’m alone, I feel REALLY alone. I feel okay while I’m with other people, they’d probably never guess that I feel the way I do. There’s always a smile on my face, I’m a really positive and happy person. But I can’t shake this weird sense of sadness and loneliness, and it’s taking a toll on me. I’m in the middle of a 4-month stretch for work in Florida, which is my favorite part of the year. It’s my second home here and I’m surrounded by people I love almost all day every day. I should be happier. 
If there’s one part of my life that could be doing better it’s dating, but I don’t rely on a relationship or men for my own happiness so I want to say that’s not the cause for this. I’ve been single for 15 months after a 4 year relationship ended. Maybe I do still think about him too much.
I don’t really like to be vulnerable and put my real feelings out on the internet a ton, but it’s time for me to admit that my mental health is going through a rough patch. I force myself to be happy 24/7 and don’t face my feelings as much as I need to, and it’s coming to a boiling point. 
This is mostly just a vent, but if anyone has advice or opinions I’m all ears.",2.5773182137011936,3.9327726109422514,4.659893617021278,84.19134615384617,75.17021276595744,7.614729950900164,22.380289922843108,8.263242389622931,1.1630938975917702,1235,32,259,21,26,427,172,329,0.049,0.763,0.188,0.9908,1,3,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,1,3,10,21,0,1,20,2,24,10,3,2,3,49,49,24,0,6,10,0,7,2,0,1,4,2,1,2,15,15,1,0,8,3,1,5,6,5,0,2,1,10,33,16,39,41,14,38,0,3,0,2,11,14,0,9,20,177,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011394621551977,0.0,0.0,0.09234257975351727,0.19101919099789225,0.0,0.0,0.15346481824920727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448067204129868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155895039222592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09473285119635128,0.0,0.07943727466540444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362822918098035,0.1020369918385051,0.0,0.1189454127701193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167739910903435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769728356915026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693452179544052,0.0,0.2797678580410156,0.06588025342957958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052409372568838666,0.07734772600010055,0.0,0.0,0.10158805467507648,0.0,0.0,0.3926692900300319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980229690792144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925017458772092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151171298164264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516963108314517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13027199970068304,0.0901056973224236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840008384741602,0.16645992224772158,0.0,0.0615559468551741,0.0,0.09264494816151324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293362498183752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472143758281038,0.0,0.20337158316629272,0.06837816277963353,0.07112387825093086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062489014882905085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29958793894276753,0.0,0.19179616401039293,0.08052082878786733,0.09634773752176708,0.0,0.08717541496674991,0.0,0.0,0.0938184257708702,0.0994261421421914,0.0,0.0,0.0927041327290886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496378842819208,0.17723081818235875,0.0,0.09105372930476048,0.2970214896593881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333511634085356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.073645073873003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464741036677118,0.0,0.0,0.06933613917459037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05908929796057134,0.0,0.0,0.1075456182123084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05439231453412227,0.07319801801982001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713549231867262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815528292550065
mentalhealth,throwawaylmaoo12,2020/01/27,"Can abuse affect me years later? Hello, I'm 17 and was abused by an ex for about 2 years 14-16, he would cause me great pain due the relentless emotional abuse he would inflict. My father has also emotional and physically abused me on and off, but he is kind to me and I still love him very much. Yet none of this abuse really affected me that much during this time, yet for the last couple of months it just feels like I've come to the realization of how severe it was/is. I've been in a new relationship for about 4 months and I realize Im always apologising and thinking the worst about everything. On top of these two abusers in my life I underwent severe mental health issues in mental school with meds, and toxic friendships for the past 5 years. In middle school I was heavy bullied which caused me to distance myself from everyone my first two years of highschool, not talking to anyone besides my boyfriend, who was emotionally abusing me. As stated above I really never let it get it me, or so I thought. Now everyday I think of his abuse, and I'm scared of men due to my father and him, not to mention people in general. I feel more and more upset the deeper I realize what I went through, I'm not a victim, I don't want to be. But I was abused, and my question is, I didn't get hurt at first, but now it's catching up to me, is this normal?",5.4236675824175835,5.33840948717949,6.235803571428572,80.74513392857145,67.68131868131869,9.462362637362636,28.78411172161173,9.188382445141503,2.162758424908424,1062,32,218,18,16,351,154,273,0.209,0.6829999999999999,0.10800000000000001,-0.9903,0,0,0,0,8,0,29.0,0,0,0,3,12,10,1,2,9,0,16,4,0,5,1,40,30,19,0,4,8,3,2,1,0,2,3,0,0,1,13,13,0,0,8,0,0,3,7,6,0,4,8,2,32,4,37,18,6,38,0,1,0,1,17,12,0,2,23,145,45,3,0.0,0.7578861491932429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056836842565080536,0.059138211185096136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049695710639594014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460225587631072,0.0,0.061222870215147066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864063230751088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398417909466079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791304651321828,0.06387559374058502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187302323483095,0.050774377928359565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090886855653005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742651439332663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835794409106851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554699653679972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608483554101662,0.0,0.0767707527297089,0.0741814727568897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401131922234085,0.0,0.05793376707985341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267668950113618,0.05020077642351471,0.03472254955908348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414592053114618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894578924992496,0.0,0.1432492059892906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345916212622867,0.0,0.1044932797110123,0.0,0.0548156767172054,0.06864249283729874,0.0,0.0,0.06963619265765836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562640378600692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678469700682672,0.04927288734594187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961773185003493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910620312307734,0.0,0.0,0.0763055219316995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115620905718226,0.14385880964723047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058392683054104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0567587800400129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057125574279581974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910810809001662,0.0,0.05642381473691953,0.041443084834879206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885547468650988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058642451842956585,0.04192054205598634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588513978421169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009760672011466,0.0,0.0,0.1830740511618768
mentalhealth,Imma-moldysloth-gtg,2020/01/27,"I’m ugly and wanna die Ugly face and head
Personality disorder 
Introverted 
No job
Soc anxiety and horrible adhd
Impulsively suicidal thoughts 

Somebody end me please",5.5177777777777735,8.990414111111113,8.367851851851853,44.687333333333356,93.07407407407408,12.530370370370376,38.73333333333333,9.888512548439397,7.551213333333335,139,9,15,7,5,50,24,27,0.565,0.38299999999999995,0.052000000000000005,-0.9712,1,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,2,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3617538965622787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302707896026583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3123994504749433,0.0,0.3449819854477025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666043154570596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3089217108661988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29870463386333695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26282913845440964,0.0,0.3304171011173559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292546020565693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389672412154445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,evaramseyy,2020/01/27,"Please help! My friend Isn’t eating anymore. My friend never eats and he admits to it. He says he’s trying to lose weight even though he’s a really good weight, he could lose like 5 kg and thats it. He’s very self-conscious and I’m just worried for him. I only see him at school and he never eats breakfast or lunch and tells me he doesn’t eat dinner. For the past few weeks he’s been living off of litres of energy drinks and barely any food. The only thing he told me he has eaten was some chicken and later a small bag of candy, and that was after days of starving himself. I myself have a very strong anxiety disorder so I don’t really like to talk to ppl or go anywhere so I’ve never been to his house and I only talk to his foster sister through him. I’m too afraid to message her privately to talk about it as I’m not sure if she’s aware of it or not and I genuinely can’t hold a conversation with anyone. I’m afraid that I’m not going to be able to help him or do anything before he makes some damaging changes to his health. Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thank you.",2.1725011441647624,3.6638655086956535,3.8554004576659047,88.98207093821512,76.52173913043478,6.581235697940503,20.80091533180778,7.273561745256523,0.4736956521739129,857,20,186,10,19,287,131,230,0.086,0.76,0.154,0.9455,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,3,7,14,0,2,6,0,15,13,0,1,4,31,28,19,0,3,9,1,2,2,2,1,1,1,0,0,8,11,12,1,1,1,0,2,10,5,0,0,6,4,21,9,25,18,3,13,0,3,1,0,37,3,0,7,10,105,29,1,0.1071928821847738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474764386716376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578967137240434,0.0,0.08200226147153117,0.0,0.10630653554062056,0.07495175558224641,0.0,0.08821060861258588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121324761041427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339585608253724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558479406033366,0.0,0.0,0.06913054116329148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285232973954192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105008215784621,0.0,0.4387403168295921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079988772289385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296180586280622,0.0,0.1656339097450303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184037041309255,0.08990830384473984,0.0,0.11818053103283035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113941021197263,0.0,0.0,0.14369825879894538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236861940493752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473805542771987,0.0,0.09465327883379547,0.0,0.0,0.2398428325747808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155208122470796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24802127691741044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24457505159335974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232773517280558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766559522049765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734101031636994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524408232058737,0.0,0.10848491952584563,0.08541884879202351,0.0,0.11182555401765708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102802288349667,0.0,0.0,0.25847273491773154,0.09369130374702607,0.09868880409782499,0.0,0.0,0.07121418785893216,0.0,0.10531646249855056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024273925775992,0.0,0.0727769306778769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768907078984411,0.0,0.0,0.08598366431364585,0.2610641051409204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885957512496178,0.0,0.07614674799002591,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MentalMisery,2020/01/27,"Recent experience triggered me and I don't know what to do. *TW, I mention sexual assault and unwanted advances.*





Almost 2 years to the day, I was sexually assaulted by a stranger. My brain has blocked out the worst of it but I'm fairly sure I was taken full advantage of. Friday night (its sunday), my step brother came onto me. Kept brushing his hand against my thigh and staring at my butt/crotch when he thought I wasn't looking. He did other things too but my brain is too jumbled to list them all.  I'm still not recovered from it and dont know what to do. I can't sleep, thinking about it makes me feel sick. It's bringing back memories of my assault and I'm losing my mind over it. My mind is all fuzzy and I dont feel like myself anymore. Every night, around the time where it happened, I get sicker and sicker. 

I dont know how to cope with this and everything it's bringing back. I'm lost.",1.0464871194379413,3.423689027322407,2.7036533957845457,91.19983606557379,84.95628415300547,5.4529274004683845,23.46838407494145,6.868970318607317,0.8384220140515222,704,27,146,9,21,231,110,183,0.156,0.7909999999999999,0.053,-0.9521,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,4,10,9,3,0,4,0,14,8,5,3,3,34,35,12,0,1,3,1,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,13,12,0,2,7,0,0,5,7,6,0,0,9,6,23,3,18,26,4,23,0,2,2,0,6,7,0,1,12,95,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280605944077107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143351758528386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269555748775561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193207892744024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31840596696687706,0.0,0.16311098289024767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197341969217464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5014232099193795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201573848746617,0.0,0.1281711356162522,0.1395026256415199,0.0,0.0,0.14421857346006084,0.10188257044962246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07450927089060656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611197561293525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23512869792580654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967338145698722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975878424929055,0.15954717791413564,0.15567865310019613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519511182161998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28799642756392085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26766479258508863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081287650948726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271573391320352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389071894136095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441082035487506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474556799021422,0.09138048578883648,0.0,0.11321858611604613,0.08315863596195666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183792926677964
mentalhealth,ExclusiveOfficial,2020/01/27,"Addictions and Disorders  After undergoing a traumatic breakup that i made up in my own mind and heavily expressed upon my significant and her family rather than taking it for what it was (a break so i can focus on my mental health and well being as well as her), I blew it completely out of proportion until I felt in my mind their may be no return and maybe even further. I can finally see what happened whilst not allowing my cognitive thinking to ever take part in my decision making. Everything i had done in the relationship and had been doing until this day had all been out of pure emotion, obsession, and depression regarding my guilt over the past rather than ever accepting the present and for what it needed to be (even though i felt happy it wasn't how i should have felt). As well as obsessing of this fantastic possible future i could have with her because of how invested i was in that obsession with the romance i had and could have with her. I am getting the help i finally needed for so many years whilst putting all this weight on such a young and impressionable lady who had only been kind and sensitive to me during the entire endeavor. So today after enveloping my being into that relationship (and hurting myself/and her more than ever was necessary because of my mental instabilities and disorder) I'm taking care of the most important mistake of my life and that was to ever start this disgusting drug addiction with poppers/maulers/whiss/whatever (tobacco and weed) 8 years ago. IT COMPLETELY SEPARATES YOU FROM COGNITIVE THINKING AND YOUR OWN REALITY, MAKING YOU SO EMOTIONAL YOU'RE BOUND TO GET DEPRESSED NO MATTER WHAT IS GOING ON IN YOUR LIFE. and by the video i'm sure you can tell how often i partake in this and the withdrawals i'm about to ensue :) please, if this sounds like you, seek help. I need a whole lot after creating misconstrued reality of my relationship and not being accepting to my own issues.   [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPPNSfHgj9Q](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CPPNSfHgj9Q)",8.035099915223448,9.34439533426184,7.819396875378466,66.80220176819668,62.23119777158775,11.703088288724716,34.55019983044689,11.467429594995785,4.500762770982197,1651,68,256,49,23,527,184,359,0.09,0.764,0.146,0.9524,0,0,2,0,0,1,49.0,0,6,1,0,22,20,1,4,13,0,32,7,0,7,8,69,56,34,0,10,5,0,4,1,0,2,6,1,0,0,21,26,1,1,8,1,1,2,5,9,3,0,18,6,40,11,53,29,10,44,0,3,1,0,20,17,0,5,25,214,61,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907558239789504,0.0,0.0,0.07755533633684987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066671881630312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920272574407412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18346492818348972,0.0,0.0,0.13970860710054633,0.0,0.0,0.056424343366543936,0.0,0.1507114365433669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20054412767376484,0.0,0.0,0.08953348883455753,0.0,0.0,0.10146157902134666,0.0,0.0,0.19683080149251556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155737278478182,0.3165618360091836,0.0,0.0,0.0786311109220026,0.0,0.08247856212281762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25201473350432196,0.1916838417433228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142068869012862,0.0,0.04972305134901616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736784647600642,0.09313560873916048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299865436295576,0.0,0.0,0.11728650982919835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366073632450296,0.0,0.0,0.09131768913794656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911082294575682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235947124142344,0.04274359713920398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438156962844597,0.0,0.0827859328470051,0.11680160842593175,0.08870196302807347,0.08789629199645921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763403445043194,0.0,0.17668158226139397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946200115968175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654071392940175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474403617426118,0.0835198910373502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603865144738036,0.0,0.09863275801067314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795244297000414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817972064576137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06971885903267466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061926455344450085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824590659482415,0.0,0.19734663321864776,0.0,0.07647083624868968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212117423507288,0.08595929009338353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293107085658821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065402531303537,0.23599427325946454,0.0,0.0,0.0976803802100951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268244395749134
mentalhealth,chapmanavfc,2020/01/27,Help and reassurance needed Okay I’m not asking for a diagnosis I know what I have but lately I’ve been over thinking reality and getting a uncomfortable feeling when I realise somebody else is alive like when I’m talking to my mom I’ll get uncomfortable because she’s alive and it’s confusing I’m not sure how to explain this sorry,1.7903030303030327,4.574857424242428,4.254848484848484,77.61893939393944,88.3939393939394,6.56969696969697,28.54545454545455,7.793537801064563,2.4832545454545456,274,14,48,6,9,95,48,66,0.183,0.583,0.23399999999999999,0.4008,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,2,1,3,0,0,1,1,14,14,7,0,1,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,5,4,4,13,0,4,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,1,4,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861595363961151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865939953883759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557049102618592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547719277094931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31984627808460736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20517048261119392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16822300098481285,0.0,0.34529094346312017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495436170171672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3584973091668363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269671750159204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34265072429612664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28849296276113107,0.0,0.0,0.2460293126636705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961347086058217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DisneyMama1,2020/01/27,"I'm gonna end it all I'm a stressed teenage mother with a 15 month old baby girl. I want to end it all right now. End my suffering. Start over in a new life, where I can go to school without worrying about my kid or my baby daddy. So I'm gonna end things.

Goodbye world. Goodbye life.",-1.119642857142857,0.8815631269841262,1.34156746031746,99.47044642857144,92.33333333333334,4.419841269841268,18.98611111111111,5.985473137389443,-0.3057603174603169,219,7,54,2,8,74,42,63,0.095,0.847,0.057999999999999996,-0.4878,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,2,6,9,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,7,7,2,15,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,1,9,25,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7253279588545157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163540454424095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289216860078558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634153142396482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19773166533206493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148320377061082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17484020740093914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20719994881056256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14491052748672587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345200799184121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601499769229342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075637480125115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973545656606336,0.0,0.0,0.2079155194290204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alexbrogers,2020/01/27,What do you think? I get audible Deja Vu. Someone will be talking and all of a sudden everything they're saying sounds INCREDIBLY familiar even though nothing else about the situation is. A lot of times I won't even hear what they're saying right away and will ask them again and what they say doesn't hold any relevance to the feeling. It happens on nearly a daily basis and it's just something that is very unsettling. What do you think about it?,4.328078817733992,6.2166126781609234,4.990476190476193,81.42000000000002,71.64367816091955,8.189819376026273,27.37110016420361,8.841846274778883,2.1797238095238103,361,13,67,7,7,116,62,87,0.0,0.976,0.024,0.2168,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,2,0,7,0,0,0,5,0,9,0,0,0,1,12,16,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,8,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,8,12,2,7,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,2,3,47,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190952012529962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950875810321543,0.0,0.19606167984115347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17432531876895868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756622742091653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18754808090030448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551485150134028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902665953318008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18453498824857809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23519746703849725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17741222875516927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20023403759327169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782115348127015,0.0,0.4978520097518726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345650041469456,0.0,0.0,0.17681384218142046,0.16065201863510076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16772903700863928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674273682453147,0.20502698872661496,0.0,0.12168295544831235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218281128003024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MRFOJ2,2020/01/27,"I think I purposely repressed my whole past and most of my memories because I was depressed, I did this for months by getting high and trying to turn my brain off, then something clicked and I fell into this brain fog dp/dr state where it seems like my brain is gone and I can’t remember anything. I know I wanted this but not for forever.
Advice?

I think trying to remember and retrace all of my past experiences and memories would help but it just feels like a huge task and makes me sad and want to give up.",3.60029411764706,5.167446627450979,4.306029411764708,86.89963235294121,72.92156862745098,7.845098039215688,27.45588235294117,8.472884824447931,1.8312117647058808,404,15,83,7,8,129,67,102,0.077,0.797,0.126,0.6124,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,5,3,3,1,1,27,17,11,0,3,4,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,1,7,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,3,2,15,2,11,13,3,13,0,2,1,0,2,6,0,2,6,54,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689058127653752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13212147929108806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787164844897847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5376909021755389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13828410581207326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15705168960155058,0.0,0.0,0.08118044563559343,0.11469913025995347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388234150100901,0.1540171143186833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761532440759856,0.16963311120461655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08823575688568712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568762197521886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10717040689837924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815191191769199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3065321043847505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3637506130598061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14616146582608733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236015810048264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20575182185640312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21800996253537105,0.17463561330431224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18939669613014914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792517454884658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405227949206626,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notocoAl,2020/01/27,"How do I get friends? My(19F) boyfriend(21M) is my only friend. I have a couple very close friends but we all live in different countries. I go to university but I have no friends. I went to a boarding high school and there, this was never an issue, I had a lot of friends. I have since then developed social anxiety which does not help. I come across as intimidating and of having a big ego but in reality I am very much the opposite. How do I change this? I am tired of being lonely.",0.9175429553264642,3.3915307113402093,2.7686855670103085,89.60979810996565,87.24742268041237,6.119931271477665,22.516323024054984,7.492282038375204,1.0479766323024051,377,14,80,7,12,125,67,97,0.184,0.6759999999999999,0.14,-0.6754,1,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,6,0,12,1,0,2,2,14,16,9,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,3,0,13,5,9,12,3,11,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,1,2,58,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13011173526210645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17992347212952434,0.14650998701096524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881917325571083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776987671380621,0.0,0.0,0.1488392989888325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6570219841636584,0.0,0.0888604637024871,0.0,0.09666112699177777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400191574573244,0.17970024025564982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17752069727984207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15018491120014693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144597046091083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250293313543957,0.0,0.13117719008619896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935449906536606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17213136413534305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406930157387006,0.0,0.0,0.1733764748951758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954834438379569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806697832888293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15766707669991414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hau5keeping,2020/01/27,For people in therapy: what could your therapist do to improve your sessions? A lot of patients tell me that their therapists lack empathy sometimes. Which I think can lead to therapists being judgmental or neglecting the actuals tools and exercises that people really need for improvement. What could your therapist do to be more empathetic or do to improve your sessions?,9.64209677419355,11.405085306451616,9.296935483870973,56.015403225806466,58.83870967741936,14.587096774193547,44.532258064516135,13.427899808715575,7.4296645161290344,307,18,40,13,4,99,44,62,0.07,0.7559999999999999,0.174,0.8135,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,4,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,8,1,0,1,0,11,10,3,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,0,8,6,3,2,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,3,0,36,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.17213839194768665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816779000093787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499667398248659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307964181165044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24458345804436615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300467505889415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17446151391340545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541790803983168,0.0,0.2017257709980512,0.8192437907830201,0.0,0.11302831500707693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sbodine,2020/01/27,Mental health in college What has your experience with mental health been like in college? How does your university handle mental health? How easy is it to get counseling or mental health services? Curious to hear any stories and experiences.,6.00225,9.753044725000002,5.82,67.58500000000001,76.75,8.200000000000001,30.5,8.841846274778883,3.6740999999999993,199,9,26,5,5,62,29,40,0.0,0.818,0.182,0.8042,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,0,5,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,5,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,16,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599047476512384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363945611108388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049229240339388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143067072437453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6626896305197031,0.1756660946563275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07614556035593872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6282828420785899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ebcm156,2020/01/27,"I think I might have anxiety, but I also feel like I’m just a little awkward, or stressed, I just don’t know. Tw: self harm/sucidal thoughts 

This question has been in the back of my mind for months, maybe years now but I couldn’t ask anyone in my real life, so I’m here asking the question.

For the past year and a half I’ve gone really down hill. I’m a 16 year old and I live in England so I’m getting close to my GCSEs and it was around the time I started my course that I felt like I am now, so it could realistically just be the stress of school that’s causing me to feel the way I do.

Pretty much all I’ve been feeling is sad, stressed, angry and worried. There a few moments of happiness but they go very quickly and they are few and far between. So many times when I’ve tried to get off my phone and try do some homework I’ve either given up after 10 minutes or produced a horrible piece. So I always end up doing them late the night before or in the mornings they are due in a panic, and before this term (started in early January) I have never missed a piece of homework, and now I’ve already missed two. My grades have taken a hit too, when I started my courses I was at 7s or 8s across the board but in my most recent tests I’ve gotten 5s and 6s across the board. Getting up for school has become almost impossible, it takes my parents to come in and yell at me with 5 minutes before I have to leave for me to even get out of bed. And the school day leaves me nothing short of exhausted, but then again I’ve started walking home recently so I’m not sure at all. But whenever I get home I think I’ve got a piece or two due for tomorrow I should do them early and get good sleep, but I always end up getting into bed and staying there until it’s time for dinner, often falling sleep.  But I haven’t talked to anyone besides my gf about this so it could just be a completely normal thing for a student to be going through and I’m just overreacting. 

Social interactions are always exhausting and terrifying for me, a friend of mine texts me ‘hi’ and I wait until I’m completely alone in case they want to call me and I can’t because I’m with other people and I don’t want to let them down again because I’ve always said I’m busy like 7 times before. And another friend wants to hang out with me but I just always want to sit at home and do nothing but I always go out because I never want to let them down, even if I have other stuff to do. The thought of slightly annoying someone I barley know at all terrifies me, and I’m always thinking someone I’m close to is angry with me, I say someone but it’s usually almost everyone. And I always think that everyone I’m not Close to detests me because I’m ugly and annoying. The thought of speaking infront of a class makes me sweat, and interviews (jobs/collages)  have the same effect.  But the thing is when I get in those situations I can manage them with ease, I’m terrified though out it but I do well, I got a top grade in a speaking assessment infront of the whole class, I’ve gotten every position that I’ve had an interview for and in a mock interview I was scored almost full marks. I’m not exactly brilliant at talking, because asking questions I’m always terrified that I’m gonna seem annoying or something, but I can always answer questions well, even if I’m panicked while answering. But again, this could just be normal teenage stuff and I just don’t know how to deal with it.

Also I’ve have something like a panic or anxiety attack or anything, I’ve never attempted suicide, even I have had many suicidal thoughts and have planned out how I would do it, and only ever cut myself twice. And my situation is so much better than others around me. I live in a good house, I get to go on nice holidays often, I don’t have any underlying health issues other than mild asthma that barley effects me, none of my relatives are ill, ffs I have a beautiful and amazing girlfriend. 

My girlfriend also has some issues, it’s likely she has depression and is going to get counselling for it soon. At the start of our relationship I used to get jealous, extremely and unreasonably jealous and it very almost ruined our relationship, I was just always terrified of her leaving me for someone better, because she is so much better than me, so I got angry every time she talked to guy, but recently I’ve gotten past that and I haven’t felt jealousy anywhere near that for 3 months. the only time I came close was recently when she shed new light on an old situation, where she was pressured into spending one and one time with another guy by that guy, and he got very angry when she suggested that she would invite me and he could invite anyone he wanted, and she ended up inviting him to hers, but it wasn’t here fault at all so I wasn’t angry at her, just the guy that she got pressured by, and I’m sometimes weary of him as to me it seems weird that he pressured her into spending one and one time with him and got angry when she said no at first.  Before now I only knew about him going round to hers just them two. Anyway, recently I’ve found new ways of ruining our relationship, because I always think she is angry at my and hates me because I made a bad joke, or just because I’m an annoying person. And she’s so lovely to be putting up with me when she’s going through her own stuff but I really hate myself for putting her though it. She’s so great and I just can’t understand why she hasn’t left me yet because she really is so much better than me, and I can never provide the support I should be able to for her, when she is struggling with school, or family issues, or people dying, I can’t never properly support her and I just want to be able to. I hate myself for it. I just feel pathetic in our relationship and my life because of all my issues and the way I can’t deal with them at all. 

My life is brilliant, yet everyday I feel sad, stressed or angry. So I hate myself for that so much and I get so angry at myself. Sometimes I get into spirals of self hate where every little thing that I do gets me more and more angry at myself and the only way to pull myself out of it is to go to sleep or wait a few hours.

I’m sorry that this post is long, rambely and probably made no sense, I’ve probably also missed some points out so if I need to fill in details, please tell me. I just started writing down my feelings into this post and this has what’s came out. Thank you for listening to me and any insight/advice about my situation is really appreciated, thank you :)",4.539716946516869,5.047044438767845,5.712346460957843,81.67366287805987,69.67618332081142,8.414589485087275,28.69988468191428,8.428315365350997,1.9656868345185463,5152,176,1033,74,86,1722,419,1331,0.182,0.7170000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.9991,2,1,2,0,0,2,108.0,4,2,11,11,84,64,14,11,46,0,88,14,4,10,14,233,213,128,3,22,54,1,9,5,5,6,8,7,7,7,51,88,1,2,33,2,2,19,25,38,2,10,38,17,167,26,157,154,30,181,0,8,1,1,98,75,0,33,84,728,218,17,0.0646532156716883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031589187043087566,0.0,0.0,0.1294817127150828,0.03348061652310851,0.03567321559888057,0.10340630642817136,0.32277992819979745,0.0,0.0,0.04396640370998207,0.06779453384948668,0.04945953302520829,0.0,0.0,0.06781054748967713,0.0,0.026602043843404075,0.05755506922551752,0.09066304366567696,0.03677618323390409,0.0,0.02485716602334676,0.02699136725961849,0.21676600101204985,0.03570219858210013,0.13753781150566202,0.0,0.0,0.11436103054753186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033009080931828035,0.0739460549152304,0.0,0.03320833102136566,0.0,0.02784651025710392,0.06778766655286161,0.0,0.0,0.10324066366760612,0.0,0.0,0.020847987740578174,0.06665462644433719,0.027842859960370087,0.0,0.0335499152204323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589533849103062,0.0,0.0,0.0854056783843018,0.02924126752074695,0.08170968401058648,0.061778918226987126,0.0,0.0,0.030474648873212745,0.0,0.09807182536613357,0.023094135097088717,0.06207722602296122,0.0,0.0,0.02749699611111377,0.0,0.03544445694466012,0.04995091404871062,0.0,0.2364504570777125,0.0,0.1469756496006412,0.054228049854371164,0.15512724826890514,0.035640199261969104,0.0,0.1280336965581187,0.0,0.03441227515208626,0.0,0.15957916319802162,0.0,0.03436167246917002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727867022953883,0.0,0.03183519701903759,0.03730056518911495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349623194569361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053297574758247215,0.0,0.0364658216867597,0.10268763031339473,0.03512295400002264,0.06611229341368062,0.06849971737748388,0.07896573854280008,0.06479950711222225,0.05708997393992165,0.02860803067569808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02917602568688463,0.061176435917907425,0.021578261750649683,0.06554821296763151,0.03247642256251748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034293422382354666,0.03264065863419115,0.0,0.051605579921484485,0.0,0.11881888153257596,0.02396977010131786,0.12466136417580942,0.06244247857540373,0.0,0.030336331589468524,0.06334642418079223,0.062036504143854185,0.0,0.06784267400593533,0.0,0.0876213843550181,0.09834336780759297,0.0,0.075856618277212,0.03589487240559175,0.0,0.061718810022467575,0.0448223991477104,0.028226347066868367,0.0,0.035484907905615634,0.030559093287928482,0.0,0.06191990881396836,0.032887781794352665,0.06970710157539134,0.0,0.0,0.0649943390880389,0.14485279627160133,0.0,0.0,0.03679475691231224,0.08283701099897403,0.0,0.1595931266343418,0.1388267156817508,0.0,0.0,0.061500013541190675,0.025707416046095177,0.0,0.13086501186039634,0.0,0.058857859342542965,0.06744740428797409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453458465570504,0.097049861176247,0.03295290570292452,0.10956091966201306,0.049773204094396485,0.06394368347774379,0.03618699085386288,0.1372856364620874,0.034455862760974273,0.0,0.0,0.14812008022301004,0.033794789369080286,0.11101869569663432,0.07072012430329855,0.07336770296896288,0.030467445315593814,0.0,0.02430558599657096,0.07794870860493076,0.02825488010144466,0.0595239945570192,0.0,0.0,0.06442908548616777,0.10356792504997138,0.0635214561351281,0.10265486281809967,0.15079923994219674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043895289492539104,0.0,0.09473519584735894,0.03365313881617071,0.0,0.027919809969863527,0.03560319146242761,0.08001851094246466,0.13346949598576624,0.10263742648141452,0.0,0.0,0.0581310054279069,0.0,0.029169735489647432,0.036091503198999696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03282923942818583,0.0,0.0459277894217882,0.0,0.0,0.06245182673043994
mentalhealth,hopemakermachine,2020/01/28,"How do you feel about mental illness merch? I'm talking clothes, stickers, mugs, hats, etc. that are mental illness themed.

Example:

Shirt that says ""I hate being bipolar, it's awesome""

Hat that says ""Borderline Babe""

Shirt that says ""Lithium-taking queen""

Shirt that says ""I'm probably dissociating""

Do you think these are good things, or bad things? Does it give off a sense of pride about mental illness, that we like having these illnesses, or is it simply to combat stigma?",4.902857142857143,7.700692857142862,4.378809523809527,82.37035714285716,72.80952380952381,6.5809523809523816,27.16666666666667,7.645422480735847,1.780480952380953,376,14,62,5,8,113,58,84,0.212,0.6709999999999999,0.11699999999999999,-0.8604,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,2,0,2,3,5,1,0,1,0,7,8,3,1,0,6,13,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,5,4,0,1,13,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,4,3,5,12,1,1,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,2,1,34,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15493312521062608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16238299962892333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206946147878174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382366747693607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800407975658636,0.0,0.15563719238826942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18320004492514527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065423429145793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5609962652535665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20006283847294415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5902524715848897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14914443957991433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24655289406226386,0.11889803243556588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PlebsicleMcgee,2020/01/28,"How do I enjoy not being good at something? I've realised recently that pretty much my entire life the only things I've had an interest in are things I'm good at, or got good at very quickly. I think a lot of the people around me during my upbringing helped me fall into a habit of giving up on things I'm not good at without working past the initial hurdles.

Recently this has manifested itself in 2 ways.

I'm in my second year or university studying a subject I thought I was interested in (I think mostly due to a series of good teachers), but now I'm here it feels that the more I learn the less I know, and the more I realise that I actually know very little and am pretty 'bad' at my subject. I realised I only enjoyed this subject throughout school because it's what I was best at, and being the best at it took very little work. Other subjects that I struggled with I managed to drop and stay away from, something I think was encouraged by my poor work ethic and the pressure to succeed in objective guidelines through school. This isn't helped by being around people who are seemingly living the dream, and are deeply passionate and enthusiastic about what they do. Whenever I see someone like that I find it kills my mood and makes me feel angry that I'm not that interested in seemingly anything.

Second was that I've recently tried to get into music. Most of my life I've always imagined that being good at music would be fun, and everything I've seen about music seems to say the same. However, being too embarrassed to get lessons, and having no musical people in my family I've constantly found myself trying to figure what it even means to be 'good' at music, and what exactly I want from it. This seems to have seeped over into the rest of my life, and I'm beginning to really interrogate what I think I want and the ways in which I value the world. I'm already on my second instrument. I tried guitar, gave up, and now I'm trying drums. I've recently not been practicing because I've killed off a lot of my interest by being totally clueless as to what I even want from it.

Overall I really think I need a way of breaking this cycle but I don't know how. I can't keep hiding from anything I find difficult or not immediately satisfying but whatever motivation or discipline I find is lost the moment progress starts to slow.

As you may have seen above I'm too embarrassed to even get lessons for an instrument I have no experience with so I haven't seeked any professional advice and I think it staying that way would probably be for the best.

I don't entirely know what I want from posting this. I just feel alone with these feelings. If there's anyone thinking the same thing it'd be nice to hear from you, and anyone that was like this at some point how've you coped in the long run?",6.857445652173915,6.4195008677536265,7.468971014492755,74.28617391304351,64.77898550724638,10.62086956521739,33.61739130434783,10.125756701596842,3.264577826086956,2237,84,420,45,30,743,238,552,0.113,0.726,0.161,0.9846,1,1,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,3,1,12,18,33,2,4,25,0,38,4,0,4,2,92,90,29,2,8,15,0,4,2,0,3,3,2,0,0,43,24,0,2,31,3,1,3,13,9,0,3,15,9,54,23,72,61,16,63,0,1,3,1,12,35,0,15,18,295,97,10,0.0,0.0,0.06263846684799806,0.0,0.0,0.06272400911945121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647966259010908,0.07083332336132292,0.0,0.05340976099502112,0.0,0.0,0.043650207007429886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976382526792957,0.0,0.10564291118690518,0.1142822916603666,0.0,0.0,0.060306968156430614,0.0,0.0535945025691706,0.07825711549922726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20208480583578034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936468843879164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271871893028526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576882547972552,0.06278841935979271,0.06051096380632396,0.0,0.12982201916615785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760006763580717,0.0,0.0,0.07037909641670717,0.0,0.0,0.10060712460481604,0.06157521251099705,0.0,0.3768663755526995,0.05133720240949436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234481601226468,0.0,0.08604805380428994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057053460511091274,0.14202956334376982,0.0,0.1411047208705112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601416496108648,0.0627182674593917,0.1286669666268722,0.056679395407557065,0.05680457602610841,0.0,0.0,0.07006905075278774,0.10914109925782252,0.0,0.0,0.04284615127902846,0.0,0.0,0.06991981511050002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04718574491104625,0.04759476957654743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976361039425801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061274941919375076,0.13350013894288598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067863802445093,0.0,0.06147459445261059,0.1306050404129597,0.06920578343693272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224126544061701,0.0,0.2535125887667862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05104506793142198,0.0,0.129923859486355,0.05114971996313771,0.2337382662692417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05438649081600328,0.0988304923220362,0.0,0.0,0.045432769456165006,0.13683225510615546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710348935807682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705752684752553,0.28790464449239384,0.0,0.05095829581476583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131550084107796,0.1743184169111725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15888607083284687,0.15143955741131515,0.20379856138228766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618751766230544,0.0,0.14018941826265394,0.0,0.0,0.09119497372943178,0.0,0.0,0.04133512462163515
mentalhealth,Katiscold,2020/01/28,"My sister has anorexia and I don’t know what to do She’s had it for over 5 years and it’s completely consuming her now. My mother is an absolute wreck and there is nothing I can do about it. I have no friends and the doctors can’t do anything but monitor her health which is extremely bad. 

She was living in the mental health ward at children’s hospital near where I live for about 2 years and when she was discharged they put her in the outpatient program. However it was her birthday recently and now that she’s legally an adult they withdrew support. She’s getting rapidly worse with her eating restrictions and she refuses to go to doctors appointments. 

I’m so exhausted of all of this. I’m trying to improve my own life and move out of my house. I’m tired of all the screaming and fighting. I hate how she treats my mom who just wants to keep her alive. It’s not fair. 

I have no friends to talk to and I use so much of my energy at work and school acting normal that when I  get home I just break down. I just need someone to talk to that understands. 

It’s been this way for so long and I just don’t know how mich longer I can last.",1.524173758865249,3.721115280851066,2.840664893617024,92.13645833333334,81.29787234042553,6.469858156028369,24.25975177304965,7.645422480735847,1.1742943262411347,901,34,194,15,24,291,128,235,0.153,0.762,0.085,-0.9571,1,0,0,0,2,0,14.0,0,0,2,1,17,9,2,0,6,0,19,8,0,3,2,34,34,20,0,3,6,3,0,0,2,0,7,1,1,2,14,14,1,3,3,0,0,4,6,5,0,0,5,1,33,4,28,29,4,24,0,0,0,0,27,9,0,0,9,135,47,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839173801652313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12012441224890485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508436664964697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29451156148982793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14721366699640978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22230530723702724,0.0,0.15033098709590145,0.0,0.0817639365642289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14204062359607464,0.0,0.305851546499743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431210509246795,0.0,0.0,0.16600524259465488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787717176431673,0.0,0.0,0.15813302528780473,0.11727224819121625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161876585749326,0.0,0.0,0.25407751666950257,0.12731933278749533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498588029685275,0.0,0.0,0.1684973627988222,0.0,0.1529097325604068,0.10576009855956206,0.10667686884724634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096084684401858,0.1380459634848925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446278491074677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205305238165486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560287445307307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189954063144802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16326057350907733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312725328476205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653559853764513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976774499800074,0.0,0.0,0.14977246175562772,0.0,0.12425642356208574,0.0,0.0,0.08485752713998014,0.11419633185149705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473817689655007,0.0,0.1466145660979607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852935399111402
mentalhealth,bananapizzaftw,2020/01/28,"Paranoia To all of you who suffer from paranoia, what do you do to relax/cope?

I've had paranoia in the past, then it stopped when I entered a relationship, but recently it has come back worse than before so I was wondering what do the rest of you do to feel more at peace.",5.9022619047619065,5.083593750000006,6.440000000000001,82.13833333333334,66.85714285714286,9.609523809523813,32.95238095238096,8.841846274778883,2.4494595238095247,214,8,46,3,3,70,41,56,0.201,0.715,0.084,-0.4909,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,0,1,6,10,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,5,0,9,8,3,10,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,1,6,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674594051926961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29597727449910394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996243040361909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17587303968301446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3320426029722365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.343439655851135,0.373438697378276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29080102582127426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37720624112980733,0.0,0.0,0.35446796305483586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WhateverDoUMeme,2020/01/28,"Anyone else had their psychiatrist say this to you? I've been on almost every type of SSRI, SNRI, and others, and at my last appointment my psychiatrist said ""well...that's life, there's no magic pill that's going to make you feel happy.""  Wtf?  I was there seeking some kind of help from a professional.  Just asking if anyone else has gone through something similar?",2.8375000000000017,5.7077062794117674,3.8632352941176498,82.50455882352944,81.79411764705883,6.341176470588236,20.264705882352946,7.645422480735847,1.0423764705882357,289,8,51,5,8,93,55,68,0.098,0.866,0.036000000000000004,-0.6289,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,0,8,10,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,3,6,2,8,5,1,5,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,3,1,30,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277824609710572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31811037122504066,0.4661482113540348,0.0,0.0,0.21265758458351228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3800508574151365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916567471840965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501774402679532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927877793260786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421504182294399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247109989559776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23687927921404786,0.0,0.1854217588907364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067168995412515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518407337059597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21637996811165047,0.1808965411222676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512068200679085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045265419716386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sweetsuedebb,2020/01/28,"Does anyone else struggle with mental health issues that stem from familial cultural obligations? I'm a 24F who has suffered with anxiety and depression for years. 

I come from a traditional Filipino family who, despite a long family history of mental health issues, views mental health as not only taboo, but completely nonexistent. I've lost a cousin to suicide. He had addiction issues and after he passed, nobody brought up depression as a possibility (many believe it was solely b/c of his addiction). I have another cousin who is not mentally stable (court ordered therapy discovered that he had BPD). He refuses to get help and relatives do not help at all b/c they justify it all as ""stress"". 

My family is a hardworking bunch, a ""pick yourself up by your bootstraps"" type. While this has been helpful for their success and financial security, I find myself suffering more and more. My family is incredibly toxic; judging each other, talking behind each other's backs, trying to ""one-up"" each other all the time all through a facade of doing it for my Grandmother. Nothing ever seems genuine... No one takes me serious when I tell them I suffer from mental health. They believe I'm ungrateful and just complaining. A ""How could you be depressed? I provide everything for you"" mentality. 

I'm very close with them, as I spend so much time with them all. But it's come to the point where I want to completely leave my family. I'm staying at my parent's house rent-free and while I am grateful for such a luxury, I think it'd be beneficial for me to leave. I also have this cultural obligation to take care of my parents once I am financially able to. I would look like a horrible person if I abandoned these obligations. 

Anyone else go through similar struggles? It'd be comforting to know I'm not the only one who constantly thinks about this.",5.610059171597634,7.5649684674556195,6.656331360946747,70.4944378698225,68.46745562130178,10.762130177514793,32.82248520710059,10.80991298281133,4.248037869822483,1474,67,239,47,26,492,190,338,0.177,0.7170000000000001,0.106,-0.9726,3,0,0,0,0,1,51.0,0,3,6,2,10,18,0,3,14,0,22,6,0,2,6,44,42,20,1,4,8,4,0,1,0,1,6,0,0,1,19,17,0,4,5,0,1,5,5,13,0,2,6,2,33,5,40,29,12,25,0,8,2,0,32,7,0,2,12,166,52,3,0.07223089082931528,0.0,0.0,0.15748466536775224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05776301729990134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574038696192692,0.05525643377978393,0.0,0.0,0.10101103663944153,0.14801816701280207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05554109650093572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275895828868112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097227843731874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364420713701028,0.0,0.0,0.12444103337858045,0.1514654295686609,0.07805593249241256,0.0,0.05767048884612876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866370812909843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320973932011748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12067928164484072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533697605165757,0.0,0.0,0.06491646720266145,0.0,0.4085571329353057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601772564507423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03773765923823927,0.0,0.04105047981983224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071122371313285,0.0,0.0,0.1452445306831716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833447501119897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22617085155365235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039696208598804204,0.0,0.0,0.15296416814187752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035288364735979745,0.0,0.0,0.0639220654103651,0.0606557564819133,0.0,0.07884854986688537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323078621431954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4367504944147032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05309801575236466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930748782862642,0.0,0.0,0.07692354137196239,0.14683656292827474,0.1098696946485841,0.0,0.0,0.16040771263266662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306922779682035,0.0,0.0,0.0682815389208802,0.08142947651927737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575629020847121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698851899821714,0.0,0.0,0.08274024140227486,0.15102282020516242,0.0,0.07900887101929624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861728131673652,0.058056453991087685,0.06313298229020782,0.0,0.08260231864787748,0.0,0.0,0.09256527657576716,0.0,0.0,0.08423682661602172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04904003351290675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059598049565027476,0.04260365084898079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051310752439644836,0.0,0.0,0.0465143255112993
mentalhealth,des-the-tiny,2020/01/28,"""Obsessions"" Are Ruining My Life and I Don't Know Why For as long as I can remember, I've gotten completely enamored with a single piece of media to the point of nothing else mattering. 

I think it started when I was five and began playing Pokemon games. I could not think of anything else for an extended period of time, I spent hours and hours playing it - most of my day, in fact - and it was all I could talk about when I wasn't playing it. 

It changed when I was about seven or so, and I started watching a kids show called ""Winx Club"" I would constantly talk about the characters as if they were real and I was always thinking about them. When playing games at recess with my friends, I would always involve fairies (what the show was about) and want to talk about it afterward. 

There has always been something I've obsessed over. Harry Potter, Minecraft, an online game called Graal, Sleepy Hollow, Charmed, Supernatural, RWBY, Buzzfeed Unsolved, and my current is the online series Hazbin Hotel. 

The obsession levels have only escalated since I was little. Now, I'm fifteen and constantly thinking about my obsession - I watch it over and over again, I read and write fanfiction, draw and look at fan art, and own a fan account where I make memes and theories. Nothing else really matters to me, and although I recognize this, I can't seem to stop thinking about my obsession. My friends are sick of me constantly talking about it and so am I. It gets in the way of everything in my life. 

I've always had a high intelligence, and I am capable of making straight A's even though I tend to do my work sloppily and the period before it's due. I don't ever study, either, and I am crushed / excited by the idea of what I COULD do if I didn't spend all my waking time distracted by a goddamn fictional world. 

I've suspected all kinds of things that might be the cause, but I don't know. My mind doesn't work like anyone else's I know in any way, not just the fixations I have. 

Does anyone relate or have any idea what might be my problem, or how to fix it?",6.749685577580316,6.426159932330831,6.979923672818412,77.3228315105947,64.96491228070175,10.462565504670767,34.176463886990206,10.018931242160765,3.2490791979949885,1619,64,310,32,22,524,198,399,0.066,0.868,0.066,-0.4527,1,0,1,0,0,0,52.0,0,0,2,2,24,18,0,6,18,0,38,4,1,4,5,69,59,37,0,9,10,0,0,1,2,4,3,0,0,1,17,21,0,1,13,13,3,0,9,8,0,2,14,3,45,10,43,36,8,43,0,1,3,0,16,16,0,9,26,214,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918237759966256,0.0,0.0,0.1192494405014283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261437773532842,0.08983748729647226,0.07215233853207265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460836314031923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17906010500891448,0.0,0.0,0.09007047563876576,0.09275274623866546,0.0,0.09192975348460028,0.2842495209292077,0.0,0.21001361847619696,0.0,0.0,0.05654569543699434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672847553494208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929781837057364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057911146373001085,0.07931066671732298,0.0,0.0,0.07880022317999047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548114128541502,0.0,0.04580865377316416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09263766748265437,0.0,0.0,0.1726922883124533,0.0,0.0,0.19795781613465316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913041763063941,0.14455824069506593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386052807735615,0.04283552597172302,0.08787738268147721,0.0,0.07759314758669138,0.07362826958842833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170528141319928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860271064674996,0.08853078603837886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16826071239798854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668382332018588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288498647409409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389695270070395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770271778302835,0.09979788668007672,0.056169406529124236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932320435542694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981966005234678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252896707645792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749957057407234,0.0,0.0,0.12411928166012745,0.0,0.0,0.0733035621493861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28189220570209955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05825002538244775,0.28090578427952995,0.08614416309685856,0.0,0.10225264903270237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05171534034194085,0.13919100323909747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911665142458227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766269882138734,0.0,0.0,0.12456927858241452,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon29646393,2020/01/28,"4-5 months ago I wrote on this sub about how depressed I was. I went from having constant bad thoughts and sleepless nights to pretty much normal again .

I used my bad feelings as fuel to chase self improvements and within a quarter of a year my life changed for the better. 

Seek self improvement and new things and life may become better

If you wana know anything ask away",5.505070422535212,6.877210774647892,4.739549295774649,86.37411267605634,68.01408450704224,6.806760563380282,28.284507042253523,6.742157984588678,1.3379723943661972,299,10,55,2,5,89,58,71,0.128,0.695,0.177,0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,2,3,5,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,2,0,13,10,7,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,4,1,7,2,10,5,1,11,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,2,7,34,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16642655992992136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15449994399729375,0.0,0.1755182828736473,0.0,0.1763946695170217,0.0,0.3135221304475393,0.0,0.2073520258061829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33209427288887444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19861163741905624,0.0,0.0,0.20288801886995764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16170638353670236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493062272441988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318094809824788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265222791675981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14985801945804486,0.0,0.13801579044578394,0.0,0.0,0.18132741040016245,0.0,0.17618802371902506,0.18395238813178424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19100639316789064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39172254006485296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473089358605705,0.0,0.0,0.14905030088861734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621532955193798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740435302843812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090303774126572
mentalhealth,material-tax,2020/01/28,What's the recognized Suicide prevention training program? I am wanting to take some training on how to help those dealing with suicide. Is there any national recognized/ accredited/ certified Suicide prevention training program? Thanks.,9.859285714285717,14.416941142857144,8.05107142857143,52.925178571428575,66.14285714285714,11.5,57.32142857142857,10.686352973137794,9.076,200,17,18,7,4,60,28,35,0.292,0.59,0.11800000000000001,-0.8823,0,0,0,0,0,3,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,6,5,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,5,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,13,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17856263047284088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707072770744542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600107637229784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8616559707449691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19742662599198185,0.0,0.0,0.24174733768227835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15487581607805664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xocrisxo,2020/01/28,"just writing feelings down How do you truly show you’re sorry and ask for forgiveness, when you haven’t forgiven yourself. When the shame is so crippling that it’s taken over your spirit. How do you start to heal? Sometimes I envy the strength people have within them. That’s something I tried so hard to pretend I have. On the outside I present my self to be a happy person but my mind never lets my heart be fulfilled.  What’s my worst quality? I self doubt. In return I doubt the ones around me. I’m in a constant battle of getting myself out of a dark hole. Internally My light is dim. When I grasp some happiness I wonder how long it’s here for, and will it be strong enough to help me crawl out of the darkness. When you realize you’ve been Unintentionally burning out your loved ones light it brings on a different kind of pain. So How does one say I’m sorry, when you can’t promise change",1.988962069979415,4.413809078212292,3.1143781240811528,89.51397236107027,81.12290502793294,5.556130549838283,22.828873860629226,6.8360192770164,0.7099206703910617,711,24,142,8,19,228,110,179,0.159,0.6609999999999999,0.18100000000000002,0.7547,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,7,1,2,15,14,1,3,9,0,14,4,1,4,1,23,24,15,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,3,7,6,0,0,5,2,0,1,3,6,0,3,2,5,24,8,21,17,3,23,1,0,0,1,17,11,0,4,11,99,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048709382472796,0.1475339206234889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16694530660933024,0.0,0.0,0.17053986844758173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648810731187293,0.0,0.0,0.13810328419696505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16306309112965814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979503176797402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245081746521422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3359899027535243,0.14136951630513842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18700925206454236,0.10577877668190737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16433803123156587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137455992595373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13965960405432395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243246036402202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15934621689272396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171517123305513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32081466873151754,0.0,0.16792423696677267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940771471997436,0.13779628873956287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549929028520304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32926690704901235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149221411181332,0.15608116506710226,0.3533176311126568,0.11170090575842087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714471785689154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17114154647170735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NotSooSkiny,2020/01/28,"I got played I met this girl we talked for like 2 months and she was amazing she was the only one ever nice to me she was amazing soon we went on a date (I payed) now I’m only 15 and don’t have a job so I don’t have much money but eventually she only wanted to talk if she was getting something out of it and I kept going back cause sh was the only real thing that made me happy:

One day i was waking through town to get my mum some milk I bumped into her and her friends and said hello. She then proceeded to ignore me and just walk on. Weird ik. Come home to a test “we were never anything your a fat sack of shit don’t message me again” so this was cool and now I wanna die even more

Side note: I have a average size group of friends I’m somewhat popular get invited to parties etc etc but i don’t mean to toot my own horn here but I’m the funny one in the group like I’ll embarrass myself for laughs anything really so make someone else smile but one thing happened there was a while back this girl I was really good friends with talked a lot shared all my thoughts with her she starting dating a friend in my group and just stopped talking to me and even when I tried to reach out she wouldn’t open the message. So at a party she decides to come up to me and start saying stuff like i miss what we had come here and hug me and I said no it’s your fault you dropped me and she said no i didn’t now can we be friends 
Now for context sober I was not so I’m Alr in a poor mindset and I punch a hole in the wall and say “I wake up in the morning to make others happy and you treat me like shit so fuck off out of my life and stop making me upset” then I started having a mental breakdown in the middle of a room and so I hate life even more now yay 


TLDR Help I wanna die",-0.3745644101685208,1.665845053984576,1.6137240788346183,98.88968066266779,88.17737789203085,4.28039988574693,17.38480434161668,5.537805323059119,-0.6805229248786064,1382,34,331,8,45,456,192,389,0.139,0.642,0.21899999999999997,0.9883,1,0,1,0,0,2,8.0,5,4,0,0,26,33,4,2,21,2,24,10,5,5,3,64,56,34,2,5,8,1,0,4,5,1,3,5,2,2,11,33,2,4,3,1,3,6,10,10,0,4,22,6,59,23,41,32,10,54,0,1,0,2,48,22,3,4,29,226,70,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14393452959633604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13449359454219353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983944114175328,0.0,0.2260018654026988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05640065338841116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815270771552847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305667063536883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19506885640128765,0.17328780565879942,0.07910723157542089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3378340663799616,0.0808498973251004,0.13707345804220053,0.0,0.0497021749341769,0.07335234176612786,0.06994502514730376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733536328733571,0.1861930107894073,0.0,0.0863428085582202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058618633317896914,0.0,0.08772358320579116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678469029877522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354282069765032,0.17090260430050894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435034023962467,0.0,0.08275117485387956,0.1751288532303767,0.0,0.0,0.09526314245153122,0.0,0.0,0.08813315366535847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980502056787179,0.0,0.06428881901416211,0.0,0.06744998586238936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23704461984123726,0.2660511062163191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954190097123568,0.1120506593543202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495666001641,0.13909400561526644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17954073401924106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409956696618565,0.06732643138250548,0.0,0.0,0.18570136585016234,0.0,0.0,0.14623107095853388,0.0,0.0,0.10011401025900186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811691405301411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620122331406307,0.0,0.0,0.06942877903234472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05937558671991059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0515826883540503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107081793248698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alex-Vs3,2020/01/28,About living [About living ](https://24ofexperience.blogspot.com/2020/01/about-living.html),58.00600000000001,69.96981059999999,18.425000000000008,-32.582499999999946,43.0,9.0,22.5,7.1686216300943375,4.699000000000002,83,1,2,1,2,14,3,5,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Check_lt,2020/01/28,"I’m seeing the side effects of my rape 6 years ago in ways I didn’t think I would and I feel like there’s nothing I can do but watch myself fall apart Happy to answer any questions below should you have them. Otherwise just thanks for taking the time to read this, I appreciate it.",0.903201970443348,3.3367074482758636,2.289704433497537,93.40431034482759,86.58620689655174,4.693596059113301,16.9064039408867,6.1826913282559595,-0.3541113300492609,224,5,47,2,7,72,51,58,0.046,0.713,0.24100000000000002,0.9184,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,1,1,2,4,1,0,2,0,6,1,0,1,0,10,12,2,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,3,9,3,6,9,0,9,0,0,2,1,3,4,0,1,4,29,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683695887546503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20588036689114905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15307948557912285,0.2162846448932053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322282981369348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790834683921306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904967692611445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33914926313196875,0.0,0.30283190660847603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412525354254985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.227630305880228,0.0,0.0,0.2787315041517384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939899614996446,0.0,0.0,0.17653594691869867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403088408156453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21506489816701554,0.0,0.0,0.19496105989016446
mentalhealth,SymbioticGoth,2020/01/28,"Bad things happen if I'm happy It started when I was 16. I got concert tickets for my birthday. It meant alot for my Mum to go with me. I was so excited! She ended up hurting her back and couldn't walk and couldn't go.

Since then if I'm too happy or too exicted, somthing awful happens and whatever I'm looking forward to either doesn't happen or is tanished.

My most recents examples: I had finally hoped to get helped with my post-paturm depression. State took my medical card and I had to stop taking my asthma medicine. 

My late FIL was approved for disability after a year of fighting. All of us were happy for him!  He died from a stroke two weeks later.

I spent the entire summer getting ready for a comic con. We found out the day before the con, after getting an advance on our taxes, that our landlord was probably going to sell the house we live in. It ruined the convention..

There have been over the years but those are the most recent. I feel like now if I'm too happy, too exicted or look forward to anything somthing horrble will happen. Even small things. I broke down and started taking melatonin to sleep. I felt better, I was happy. So my cat went missing for three  days. I don't understand. Whenever I'm happy, bad things happen. 

I'm not allowed to be hopeful or somthing awful will happen to me or my family and I don't know what to do.",2.443002573634544,4.683997442379186,3.973624535315985,85.00131183871892,78.29368029739777,6.22024592507864,25.58778953388619,7.321109707123232,1.3953973691735777,1068,41,201,14,26,354,158,269,0.10800000000000001,0.747,0.145,0.9305,1,0,0,0,2,0,32.0,5,0,0,3,11,19,1,0,12,2,21,4,1,1,1,38,58,19,1,7,11,1,3,1,0,2,3,1,1,0,9,11,0,1,6,3,3,9,6,8,0,2,16,6,31,11,29,37,5,38,1,5,2,0,12,9,0,13,24,136,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274207812781361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797078914500979,0.14761333057967288,0.0,0.0,0.07521817713682204,0.0,0.0,0.07817875825477677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140157472079994,0.0,0.07613503332531328,0.0,0.09174071618378016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829229789147417,0.0,0.0,0.05838448509972479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333154032458212,0.0,0.04469549047255776,0.0631498613195182,0.08487367459248495,0.0968331004850624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969212543007547,0.0,0.0,0.1385492170936188,0.0,0.1507118341508592,0.0,0.07069806665830901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4690078235486941,0.5645928010052987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059249732729381964,0.0,0.0,0.17559362725209787,0.0,0.1019966978165464,0.09462935852631886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048579930799172964,0.0,0.09971412970176352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04318564360177996,0.0,0.07805496767652148,0.0,0.14846014551382616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904930540895582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465858621854698,0.0,0.09530544830896163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17456005643229258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312178505843042,0.0,0.0884594760905491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12513377483497254,0.0,0.0,0.07390271131056174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329250373326664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617840184488148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821080611320518,0.0,0.0,0.08634969375972687,0.0920229764082215,0.10632906842733084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090564871498364,0.0,0.0,0.08194364185535698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384778518002825
mentalhealth,uh_oh_u_wot,2020/01/28,"I don't understand this or really know how to articulate it. I have always been a loner. I can never connect with anyone, I have interests but I rarely pursue them, I really struggle to concentrate on anything and finding the motivation to even read is exhausting. I honestly don't feel depressed (even though this is making me depressed) but it feels like there's something in the way of me feeling anything and when I do feel an emotion it feels fake, dull and not really there at the same time (if that makes sense). 

I honestly have no motivation, I barely speak all day as my job doesn't require me to talk to anyone and when I do I barely have a conversation as I don't know what to say. I think people are work are starting to think I'm rude because I just laugh when someone tries to talk to me, I can't think of a response to be honest. 

I really really want friends, I want a life, but at the same time I just feel like I want to do nothing because I don't care at the same time. I have no friends, my family are in another country and I only talk (or barely talk) to people at work. I want to get out of this rut but it honestly feels like my brain is decaying or something and the isolation is making me really depressed. 

I don't know, I just thought I'd vent.",4.3184192595957285,4.891194791505793,5.842112196229845,80.3132614126732,70.1969111969112,9.337360890302069,29.521008403361343,9.478462496947786,2.5311442652736766,997,37,203,21,17,340,115,259,0.113,0.648,0.24,0.9890000000000001,1,1,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,5,12,21,1,1,11,0,25,3,1,6,2,52,51,21,0,5,12,0,7,3,2,0,2,2,0,0,9,8,0,1,18,1,0,0,11,9,0,0,2,9,35,12,27,48,4,19,0,4,0,0,10,8,0,4,13,141,44,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087543426607159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191920662209067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13592437439673855,0.0,0.15996919215140198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850040296941465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850365349335664,0.0,0.0,0.09909850562936758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06268382565780824,0.0,0.2511461059870432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933319653090744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839499717299682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162839122517694,0.0,0.3440189764581624,0.2083120092198835,0.0,0.0,0.08883601590421071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15018784674279098,0.0,0.05078126008610909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645271942138677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16025028054037585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865289822579068,0.1424561828033675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19463864058355845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496408109499651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326284768012362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392246435197093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476789648485527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722299511468396,0.0,0.37360013974156536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729471091397916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235444197853671,0.14965352468099305,0.0,0.0,0.06879631908519843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161108646618144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124920781319985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18683914740425625,0.09549525669938964,0.07716331671774962,0.1700285187620553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599017391961097,0.0,0.0,0.101185184519509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293165096141047,0.07715021022154381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152069921647228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zzcola25,2020/01/28,My life is a fog I can’t think clearly. My life feels like one big fog. I barely remember anything from the previous day. I can’t focus and a lot of the time and my mind feels blank. I don’t know what is wrong with me or how to deal with it no more.,0.05263157894736992,1.3064791754385965,2.3121403508771934,98.79031578947372,81.80701754385964,5.963508771929827,18.417543859649122,6.742157984588678,-0.3055866666666667,191,4,51,2,5,65,41,57,0.09699999999999999,0.807,0.095,-0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,5,2,0,1,1,14,9,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,2,8,1,5,9,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,3,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24103474205655304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18889861910720826,0.30197079567384943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962017664168124,0.20925042184404072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16097218268536975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41377301198412575,0.14309792535499746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490162038495464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957491830613235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19847908962346975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318027305712184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18768082818525172,0.0,0.0,0.17079447032226824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32024415399931866,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TaeyaRuth,2020/01/28,"Help! Mental health troubles... So I 25F have had the worst year of my life.
I was made homeless twice by two members of my ""family"". I had to move into a hostel to save myself from the streets.
Needless to say, my depression and anxiety took a beating! 
I have since had counselling and, in the past 3 months, been really focusing on changing my way of thinking with some CBT tools and general positive thinking tools.

I am exhausted. All the time! 
This past week has been torturous because I have virtually zero energy! 
I don't understand why I have been so drained!
I am on regular antidepressants and am being treated for PMDD. 
I did take into consideration that this week was my natural menstruation week but my meds changed when I bleed to the week after and my PMDD has been so much better since starting treatment! 

Can anyone help please? I feel like I'm losing my mind 

TLDR: Treated for depression and PMDD. This week is my natural menstruation week but my meds changed when I bleed to week after. I am exhausted and can barely function. No obvious triggers. Help?!",3.2896969696969687,6.153505040404045,4.4876767676767715,78.91818181818184,79.40404040404042,8.044444444444443,28.696969696969692,8.841846274778883,2.923284848484848,850,39,146,22,22,278,112,198,0.14,0.735,0.125,-0.5046,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,3,5,13,1,0,7,0,25,6,0,2,2,25,34,14,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,10,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,8,0,3,12,2,25,5,20,21,4,26,0,3,0,0,4,6,0,1,18,103,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417493077020254,0.0,0.0,0.07693762006101572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670750851067139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731523166869782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3492009182706212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18954249393451292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372930362450022,0.0,0.05563598229212438,0.07860758499294226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169599154834956,0.0,0.0,0.22125836719269967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771954990745503,0.053756557480397836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309876255498395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411586893739994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444436777563049,0.0,0.1108873667626484,0.0,0.11110194588479064,0.0,0.08782727720120477,0.11694764732460898,0.08088690301301411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100778654021112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207831729757675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704899464224145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875026444288489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820408410632462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788191165661021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273110939190673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100938505265076,0.0,0.0,0.06416111721002303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225069267702472,0.0,0.0,0.10748623590776324,0.11454821575478295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733906023841231,0.6178327527512797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928765256132753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085763343577825
mentalhealth,pizza_bug,2020/01/28,"What mental disorder do you think my cousin has? She’s not normal at all? 
My cousin grew up without a father. Her father is a deadbeat who left her mom when she was 2 months old and wanted nothing to do with her. Her mom got married to her step father when she was 6. Her stepfather is a verbally abusive narcissist who my cousin has never gotten along with. My mom (her aunt) would always watch her when she was little because her mom was busy with school and work. She gets along with her mom. Now my mom has always been obsessed with a 90s singer who’s still making music today. My cousin was heavily influenced by this guy at a very young age due to my mother. (She was taken to various concerts, backstage passes, watched his trl interviews, watched him on tv all the time) yadda yadda. So my cousin has always had admiration to this guy growing up. Her current wall in her room is an entire shrine to this guy. She has huge fan account on Instagram that the guy has interacted with her on. She’s gotten interacted with him at recent concerts and selfies. When we go on trips, she brings her laptop which is several tabs opened with just pictures of this guy on there “watching” us. I remember after we went to his concert about a year ago we went back to the hotel and she opened up the laptop and was talking about how great the concert was and had it “staring” at her while she sleeps. A recent trip I went on she brought the laptop yet again...to have his pictures stare at us. I believe she talks to his pictures to this very day when she’s by herself , my aunt said when she was younger she caught her talking to the pictures of him she used to put in dvd cases and sleep with or have them propped up against the wall. She doesn’t have dvd cases with his pictures anymore. Recently she saw a picture of him with his own child (he only has one and the kid is a toddler) and she started crying. I asked her why she was crying and she seemed embarrassed and didn’t want to answer. My aunt said she used to call the pictures of this guy “daddy” when she was little in her sleep.  She doesn’t really have friends and has massive social anxiety. She does see a therapist but I don’t think she’s ever brought up the pictures or anything but I’m not sure. I know she can’t fall asleep without the pictures looking at her.",4.302976827094471,5.514549137254903,4.668096652802536,86.36825311942957,70.69934640522877,7.219409784115666,27.85244602891661,7.463857097105799,1.4739551198257073,1830,64,363,19,33,577,205,459,0.036000000000000004,0.9359999999999999,0.028999999999999998,-0.4613,1,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,5,1,1,1,18,6,0,2,23,0,39,4,4,5,5,59,69,26,0,4,9,18,0,0,1,1,0,6,1,8,13,30,0,0,6,8,1,16,10,2,0,1,28,15,81,4,59,40,4,75,1,0,9,0,107,29,0,3,30,256,94,6,0.0,0.0856908499736842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410991691378437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18053542325552407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05532684624181135,0.0,0.07172491637194044,0.0,0.0,0.059515612033449565,0.0,0.0676121800307463,0.0,0.0,0.05561187170448792,0.0,0.044087389040886056,0.0,0.0,0.08148317981941304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384980138684054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15888669305641098,0.04664230904025116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288834766231024,0.0,0.06329028656258663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542023400065149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05587651908889627,0.0,0.03778574778316248,0.0,0.041102789843367966,0.0,0.0578432568197697,0.07973628960829351,0.0,0.4296664491129371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03974679289441284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857907896247396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14497315875246208,0.0,0.0,0.06073304922156145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048276119769884385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288450652588079,0.0,0.0,0.5082224743551547,0.057727475592627774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05577990495408977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086111930804045,0.06939580534246377,0.0,0.07589075277857232,0.0,0.04900789153462013,0.05500484999342229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270452398892081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04633192319401373,0.0,0.2142305154570991,0.0,0.08192778524716808,0.0,0.13759134326353425,0.0,0.0,0.07319466993292012,0.05763201439157301,0.0658400824833368,0.0,0.08170432905510927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21712549305108367,0.07372412295592776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051190544640981835,0.0,0.05775718819044099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816350900432122,0.0,0.0,0.1743913034332414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397250019069917,0.0,0.09268323114822334,0.0,0.0,0.0421720841835061,0.0,0.06855368454718233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17399116844805873,0.12492758736852028,0.0,0.11934798896857145,0.08531588011109581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011322520385884,0.0652601984546632,0.0,0.0,0.13943345426684295,0.0,0.0526519570174391,0.0,0.0,0.0513761369778898,0.0,0.0,0.04657359803315346
mentalhealth,scream-king,2020/01/28,"what is my mood disorder? I realize people on Reddit aren’t psychiatrists, but I kind of really need an opinion here. I am a 21 year old male. first of all let me start off with the conditions I already have: ADHD, OCD, and Aspergers. but I am trying to figure out what my mood problem is. My moods shift multiple times throughout the day. I am easily irritable as well. I am trying to figure out if I have bipolar or borderline or some other kind of mood disorder. My signs of bipolar are sleep schedule shifts twice or three times a year, for example I go to bed at 3 AM and wake up at 11 earlier in the year, and later in the year I stay up until five or six and wake up at around one or two. I also have delusions and hypersexuality and deal with reckless behavior. I realize some of those can be intertwined with borderline, but the mood shifts throughout the day don’t really happen with bipolar people which is where I’m confused. My psychiatrist is even having a hard time figuring out what my mood disorder might be. The only good thing is that my meds seem to be working with my moods (it’s a mood stabilizer called Trileptal, bipolar people are treated with this but so can anyone with mood issues) tricky part, is I have antisocial traits a lot of the time (yes I know what antisocial actually means). I suppose the antisocial traits could be a result of the grandiosity shift in borderline people. speaking of which, the self image issue is a huge thing I deal with. I go from extremely insecure to feeling extremely attractive and above everyone else, I deal with impulsive spending and impulsive behavior in general which is all under the borderline spectrum. I also deal with dissociation. Will someone help and give their opinion?",6.8458588957055175,7.5086648435582815,7.670680981595094,69.09970245398775,64.67484662576688,11.427975460122699,34.704907975460124,11.20814326018867,4.214378404907976,1393,60,239,40,20,467,165,326,0.094,0.838,0.068,-0.8231,1,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,2,8,18,0,2,20,1,32,7,3,1,2,57,43,24,0,4,10,0,2,0,0,2,4,1,1,2,14,23,0,0,9,0,1,2,2,3,1,7,0,3,29,6,44,35,6,38,0,0,0,0,11,19,0,14,16,178,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.09794292717495597,0.0,0.12062066086937201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107565906485766,0.1605256178798982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017837635216073,0.0,0.0,0.08934719137235794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024851055077563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013423889714645,0.0,0.0,0.12945578385718715,0.4138925550720976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.345085060325531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384307623146531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629092444480204,0.0,0.0,0.09590419929782022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05074816326424469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537143319481684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962803985829,0.1140808417803361,0.08418240153797159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887534937343428,0.0,0.08990839573698711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06727334409183115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20951246079346106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20903189220387716,0.055158635323082884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263123320297747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532774886032507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932820843256252,0.11148421539998044,0.0,0.0,0.1064726709094422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442026098526038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531743700750094,0.0,0.06801073043282692,0.0763330130772524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868680729747884,0.0,0.27832512606157395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960368927392601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859430757418056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913696133669836,0.10470382921222576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043867708911257,0.0,0.08503995032668119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103970857077181,0.10697700846964063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335767890569342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23409733896989204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362841147933544,0.0,0.09804318758794417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902412617433191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306778445965638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25853015275158714
mentalhealth,HedgehogFaerie,2020/01/28,"I'm not getting better Since early January, I've been in crisis. I'm severely suicidal, with daily thoughts of how I would kill myself. Im 20, still live at home. My parents have been with me every step of the way, but it isn't easy.

We did what all the websites say to do. Ive been in emergency rooms for hours and emergency appointments at the psych ward at 2am. I've seen about 5 different emergency doctors in 2 weeks, never two the same. While I'm currently in the system as an emergency outpatient, I've yet to get any actual treatment, only 5 different assessments. 

I'm not getting better. Haven't showered in days, I hate eating, I'm not sleeping. Practically every night, despite how good the day might be, I go into a suicidal meltdown.

While initially, my parents were extremely supportive, its waned int he past weeks. I understand that this is extremely difficult for them, and the effect it is having on them is showing. I can no longer go to them when I'm in crisis as it turns into them not being able to deal with it. I'm not exaggerating when I say I have no friends, No support system outside of my parents. I havent been to college all month either. 

I suppose what I'm asking is if anyone has any suggestions or ideas? I can't keep going on like this. Im surprised I've even survived up to this point",3.8596387832699617,5.31211879467681,5.511123574144489,78.97216064638785,72.07984790874525,8.910190114068444,29.880038022813693,9.3871,2.8099537642585566,1045,44,197,24,20,356,149,263,0.22,0.701,0.079,-0.9912,7,0,0,0,0,1,33.0,1,0,4,4,8,11,2,0,9,0,25,3,1,3,3,30,48,13,3,2,9,3,0,1,1,2,1,2,3,0,11,8,1,1,4,1,0,4,13,3,0,1,8,3,21,8,31,36,4,40,0,0,1,0,15,16,0,3,18,124,32,3,0.11202091391511974,0.0,0.10931625277005567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235612564619996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832762762543345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472443279881524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19814679014982567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444884444325301,0.1154886434246648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23407602521029744,0.0,0.11465815212467803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462536098698475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398875714653562,0.0,0.18876490279177732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654708021092991,0.0,0.17557891208379822,0.0,0.19099220070281034,0.09395782779574008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105974607297402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123661102838994,0.0,0.11031803531164908,0.0,0.0,0.12645797657766505,0.24200361982733865,0.0,0.0,0.0995693353378456,0.12393454396788445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05472776014400442,0.0,0.09891651930533267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883648714570665,0.0,0.0,0.08941402474519003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639743468162797,0.0,0.0,0.10512403920451867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519695288815674,0.0,0.0,0.3731579043640785,0.0,0.10693663776259824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589597200902097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17816705387112547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655174723863485,0.0,0.09266485758277054,0.0,0.11210181407944393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894600465559282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450653961861787,0.2542400112059778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893209279109693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184658672445055,0.10942815561965573,0.11661772201535392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891698732147325,0.1797128402906895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795764432082661,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zenseaking,2020/01/28,"Help to deal with wife in caring way My wife has always been strong willed. She has trouble seeing things from other people's perspective and sometimes has problems with empathy. 
However, this was not really a big issue until we had our first child.
Since giving birth our child has become her sole source of happiness. If the child is not happy my wife is not happy and the reverse.

This creates a few issues.
First there is no discipline. The child gets whatever they want because their happiness is more important than their development.
Second, I am a horrible person for not being the same. If I am not constantly slaving away at the child's happiness I am being selfish. I take no time for myself in fear of causing am argument or issue.

My wife has become very controlling of even the smallest details. I clean the house and put something away and it isn't in the exact right place or isn't folded in the specified way there is hell to pay.

When dealing with me she either talks about me as the best father and partner ever, or I am useless and lazy. There is no middle ground.

I have looked into it a bit and it sounds a lot like narcissism. However she is not at all image conscious or over confident etc. And her sole focus is the child and not herself. Although she self admittedly gets pleasure from the child being happy.

I have no plans on ever leaving as I love my family. A diagnosis isn't important other than it helping me have the tools to deal with things in a caring way.

Many thanks",4.486099075897592,6.392345508710804,5.311364944705347,79.20789274352373,71.26480836236935,8.196879260718074,27.11240721102863,8.841846274778883,2.26742793516134,1199,42,210,23,23,390,154,287,0.14,0.684,0.17600000000000002,0.9184,2,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,3,0,3,6,8,20,1,1,20,0,31,1,0,2,4,42,43,20,0,4,14,5,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,10,10,15,0,2,2,0,1,1,14,6,0,3,3,3,30,14,32,36,9,30,1,1,2,1,37,17,1,7,10,168,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608920575180117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17183036294619375,0.0,0.0,0.05574375967829416,0.20198668105708706,0.0,0.0,0.09596543206140967,0.0,0.09983378393241513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18646766234904166,0.09393876053635727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881909134588356,0.1025628583027151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828260017719542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198486520340352,0.06039827449493228,0.16543369346949166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620580001712395,0.10290056170317564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555654050478589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555202471781092,0.08772196180389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5840666559743531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258673224669588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055147534790791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28633311172894105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968265935822919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04467519670757389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679040591850597,0.0,0.0,0.07774290132266608,0.08253229253344611,0.0,0.0,0.09271043879908998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339614925984673,0.07984586928577346,0.09554011020440692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750010137716553,0.0,0.0919270476417789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05858173160504264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809316112377084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286948104457923,0.0,0.09539662737236704,0.0,0.0,0.0756438913176154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039849575009549,0.09044101563194692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06875493445180138,0.07349967961398778,0.0,0.08418987192192398,0.0,0.0,0.12150341489444533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05332206277123885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545134515656997,0.053936375243775384,0.2177533242058066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sammy_mez262,2020/01/28,"Medication My psychiatrist said I may suffer from a form of bipolar disorder. I feel that I have waves of intense depression that come and go and they are really debilitating. I want to do things and live life, but it just blocks me and tires me down and prevents me from enjoying things even when my life is objectively going overall well. I'm very tired of this. But my psychiatrist hasn't prescribed me medication yet. Should I tell him I feel like I need it? I don't know if I can cope if it goes on like this.",3.785,5.398029019607847,5.115833333333335,81.09375000000003,72.52941176470588,9.02156862745098,26.47549019607843,9.516144504307137,2.2090549019607844,408,14,85,10,8,136,67,102,0.122,0.715,0.16399999999999998,0.5499,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,5,6,0,0,1,0,9,7,0,0,0,20,19,10,0,5,5,0,2,2,0,2,7,1,0,0,9,6,0,2,3,0,0,3,2,2,1,0,1,3,18,4,8,16,1,7,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,3,4,60,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003337449795985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17001108544752436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22622519967907664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037374847774366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19961188740486469,0.14101493097031811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243617372508226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084799783411539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788437519414435,0.19286884956409356,0.0,0.1742983380929943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976978378990521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14636163952456627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645261815066158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18776239351951068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17252691864533642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262273314678294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4537398479430968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16286681661038913,0.11642530318350705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17747665550559735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DeliciousDistillate,2020/01/28,"Does anyone use a daily health check-in worksheet? I'm envisioning a worksheet which asks some basic health and mental health questions that I could fill out daily. Things might include:

-length of sleep
-tiredness rating
-medicine taken?
-mood ratings
-# alcoholic drinks
-exercise?
-went outdoors?
-etc.

Does anyone have a similar system? Please share if you do.",5.243605015673982,8.59533075862069,3.3525705329153617,80.41766457680255,94.86206896551724,4.867711598746081,27.68652037617555,6.574015621080383,2.105737931034484,296,13,38,4,11,83,49,58,0.0,0.903,0.09699999999999999,0.6662,0,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,4,7,1,1,0,8,9,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,1,2,5,2,4,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,4,0,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20307841176430388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657391123034108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17764726605481276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517191093363156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33258345968304265,0.0,0.0,0.18615167737164995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21192756011000044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6059615066923818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915000125153332,0.20158597649842336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20858984942811626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128709411047485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19016174410088024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624384124181562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16412016548460062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17615462516691746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,akfireandice,2020/01/28,"How do you deal with a difficult diagnosis? My therapist has cracked open the conversation on the possibility of bipolar II for me. This is really frustrating because I know bipolar is manageable but it doesn't go away. I've been so determined to get better, especially because my boyfriend's parents don't think I will and so they think he shouldn't marry me. This whole thing seems to be confirming those fears. So now I'm very conflicted and don't know how to handle it.",4.291,6.65657982222222,5.448611111111113,76.03625000000005,73.0,9.833333333333336,31.25,10.125756701596842,3.636666666666668,384,18,70,12,8,127,66,90,0.083,0.828,0.08900000000000001,0.3565,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,1,6,4,1,1,3,0,11,2,0,2,0,14,19,8,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,5,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,0,8,1,8,15,1,5,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,1,46,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320959642390389,0.0,0.0,0.3011784746539646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184809231918655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546805367325717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779811981973853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906472949031306,0.0,0.14039474573519944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715261374454419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27430130083580845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784929847702097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15825588971051088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22488988398737866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868247595345265,0.164117980982749,0.31657799192117586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038283852398108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758039132927279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Orangedoge1515,2020/01/28,"Why do I suddenly feel so empty and boring? For the past week or so I have felt so empty and unable to socialise with anybody. I am getting enough sleep and nothing major happened to trigger this, I just feel so empty and unlike me. Before I could make conversation with anyone and talked all the time, now I feel like I am a shell. 

I don't know what triggered this, I don't know if it is serious. I just feel like I am dragging myself through each day and ending up in the same place at the end.

Can someone tell me if I'm being crazy and this is how everyone feels so I can stop worrying that I am depressed or something?",3.674782986111112,4.581708648437502,4.89104166666667,85.32756944444445,71.890625,7.251388888888887,27.503472222222207,7.3871296695380915,1.4267055555555554,489,17,100,5,9,162,79,128,0.174,0.7859999999999999,0.039,-0.9345,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,5,0,14,1,1,4,1,32,26,17,0,3,6,0,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,1,8,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,6,16,2,9,23,5,13,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,4,11,74,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249437553413057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205148438205493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266891398262654,0.0,0.0,0.11523985468546215,0.0,0.15390488404861932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165314705360764,0.18463387569681294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17074534117376655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.451753547495204,0.25531142916924304,0.17156980796373605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933578155394367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580144110371458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19640599839997247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17459719082797406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927653543606564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17145726032870265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705792133718791,0.0,0.0,0.186692349249987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788184074543656,0.0,0.1514029149739157,0.13756379940458055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14939230625317113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14362373904425135,0.15618237681078656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419520287677744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14333382632464733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16123935417026072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146771900554945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DokkoAE,2020/01/28,"Something is wrong with me Hello, I dont know how to say it but I can explain it in my way. 

Imagine a dark room with a light bulb in it. When something makes you happy it flashes for a sec and then instantly turns off. Like nothing happend. Where is that good feeling that should stay with you? That s exactly what Im feeling right now.

I was happy and smiling ....yeah there were always bad thoughts but not that much. They were not that strong.

Not long time ago I had a feeling like something broke in me. I feel like something is pushing my chest. I dont want to use my mask of happiness anymore, it s too hard for me but I dont want to be sad and boring because it makes my parents sad and I can lose my friends like that.

Have your ever experienced something like that or do you have any suggestions for me? (Yes visit some professional to help me but I want to use that like my last chance if it will keep going like that.)

Thanks

PS sorry for my bad English",0.6534560067681916,3.0395677360406097,1.9269860406091404,95.86699344331645,87.3756345177665,4.501607445008459,21.91391708967852,5.985473137389443,0.15875313028764815,752,27,163,6,24,239,110,197,0.162,0.578,0.26,0.981,1,0,5,0,0,0,21.0,0,4,1,2,8,22,0,0,4,2,18,1,1,5,2,37,36,13,0,5,9,1,5,7,1,2,0,1,1,0,17,7,0,1,8,0,0,3,6,8,0,0,5,8,26,14,17,28,2,20,0,4,0,0,13,7,0,3,15,105,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390482752884302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814625775944261,0.0,0.0,0.07203931128784903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505887740402896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17690230212382368,0.06457688394213558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37246446555138224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958241109404223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142553149664572,0.15135971530963244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818449803173388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020520033408215,0.0888531022405433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383087620479749,0.09489679235509052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100587784916683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442778573939635,0.0,0.0,0.09415973677073076,0.0,0.0,0.05821900746796894,0.08635101846440756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3622808197130476,0.0,0.0,0.09374898346352778,0.0,0.11851396819380275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14142463191300866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778742828279669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164731831851866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762808274796238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046775875305596,0.0,0.08424362197858963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4077690055345366,0.0,0.11858535967089386,0.0,0.11291242465508634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975305508559432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410041524598846,0.06177144632880514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11522666585507935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829873459547878,0.0,0.0,0.18744930721275008,0.08408613045601034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582309739628227,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,katt-w,2020/01/28,"How to help? (CW: Suicide) My very best friend (mid-20s, F) just survived an incredibly violent attempt on her own life. She's isolated, having just moved across the country. The attempt was precipitated by learning that her fiance had cheated multiple times and the end of that relationship. It's not her first attempt, but it is the first time she's attempted without immediately regretting it and walking it back (going to the hospital, etc). 

I spoke to her as soon as I knew, and she told me she was lonely and could use some company. I booked a flight and will arrive in a couple days. 

Now she wants space and doesn't want to talk to anyone. I understand this, but it terrifies me. I feel like if I give her space, she'll take so much that she disappears, permanently. 

I'm a survivor as well, but I feel almost like my own experiences have been blocked out. I can't access what I was thinking or feeling at the time (it's been years) or what would've helped me. Even if I could, there's no guarantee it would help her. 

So, how do I help? And how do I keep my own feelings (guilt, misplaced anger, fear) out of it when I'm with her? 

To complicate things, she's undocumented and doesn't have insurance, so getting help through the standard means is more complicated than usual.",4.304903722721438,5.959243910569112,5.096872058194268,81.58122593068036,71.27642276422766,8.593581514762517,29.6140350877193,9.134995656068208,2.4713447154471546,1006,41,198,21,19,326,144,246,0.11199999999999999,0.737,0.151,0.8494,0,2,0,0,0,1,43.0,0,0,0,8,15,12,3,2,11,0,21,1,0,4,0,46,41,25,1,8,11,0,4,2,1,3,1,1,0,0,15,11,0,2,9,1,0,4,6,7,1,2,9,5,33,5,22,27,8,25,0,2,0,0,26,8,0,6,15,143,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134203258890204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937110090109123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305432689011383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14064738591609616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140106617938841,0.14829233565525274,0.0,0.08643283556945723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870334538375013,0.0,0.14946949527289438,0.08851999349223022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109882772584272,0.0,0.15081154434430433,0.2710613628949517,0.09574504773812492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279973849850306,0.0,0.0,0.10354474480318744,0.0,0.07002074709021479,0.12856571736428574,0.07616755578957181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44915921983920987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912454345834993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946634096028134,0.13095235434748592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14598879680771248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14244373589344353,0.09852128634998077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388902706678902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659786237933242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007675533966262,0.10772147409040814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903798647958469,0.08587562068343567,0.0,0.0,0.23444719351535745,0.0,0.0,0.128063368686153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139521197435889,0.0,0.11575161949844764,0.14760584243007455,0.11058184423463936,0.1580988074741799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120501501059933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12919202622588016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904101786972744,0.0,0.0,0.0863055072424406
mentalhealth,aussieaussieoi24,2020/01/28,"I haven’t cried in at least a decade and I feel blocked up. Why can’t I cry? I think it would help I’m genuinely worried. Well I feel like it would be good to let it out. I legitimately don’t remember the last time I cried. My last relationship was 8 years, I never cried once during that time and my girlfriend thought it was weird. We broke up 2 years ago and I got a trickle down my eye but not a proper cry. I think I would feel so much better if I could let it all out. That’s a decade at least. Before that I remember like a good cry and I would always feel so much better afterwards. Is this a problem? Is there anything that can help? I’ve got some real messed up things happen in my life and I’d love to just let it out but I can’t. What can I do?

TL:DR haven’t cried in over a decade regardless of terrible things that have happened. I want to let it out.",0.055638297872338434,2.006401159574473,2.010042553191493,97.39400000000002,85.27659574468086,5.4621276595744686,17.910638297872342,6.742157984588678,-0.2460327659574473,670,16,165,8,20,222,94,188,0.191,0.64,0.16899999999999998,-0.3426,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,0,2,5,13,0,0,8,0,23,3,1,0,2,37,37,10,0,9,5,0,4,2,1,4,1,0,0,0,16,10,0,1,9,0,0,0,7,5,1,0,5,5,22,8,18,22,6,23,0,1,1,1,6,14,0,2,11,108,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690915474443033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219281858625591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139761890107645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382795328189913,0.0,0.0,0.1534676306119908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927228602269231,0.0,0.667126810948591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17547761501942602,0.06198269073677765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554346500751894,0.13878277195885666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344645405242768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163092929506384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14144499311025155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35487952411570023,0.061282468181001325,0.08477492541414343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830596683858584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275599013647735,0.0,0.06691609579704991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239855021889036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301938340118865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875399225140333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314976884747313,0.1965685502889216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528145027164555,0.11118699430196688,0.0,0.0688792261317757,0.10118307757990684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051174393459638985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800933259696118,0.0,0.07828908448519231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811088122790901,0.0,0.24653254655234166,0.0,0.0,0.11174358759359232
mentalhealth,jpeters2100,2020/01/28,"Speaking Candidly about Mental Health. I've struggled with mental health issues my entire life & became sick of hiding it.  About a few years ago I told my parents about my issues, and this year for my podcast series I spoke with a mental health professional about the state of mental health in 2020. 

I wanted to share it in here because many people have reached out and told me that it helped them, the reason I made this episode is because I am sick of the way people speak about mental health. I'm sick of being treated like a pariah - when my behavior is more rational than the majority of the populations, I just hate being alive. Regardless, I am reaching out to share the episode with whomever may need it. I worked really hard on the episode & I hope you like it.

I understand if this post isn't allowed.

 [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mental-health/id1450336723?i=1000463794932](https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mental-health/id1450336723?i=1000463794932)",11.752820512820511,13.097615820512823,7.88666666666667,69.39166666666668,54.256410256410255,9.497435897435896,32.07692307692307,9.150863307647796,2.7023000000000006,812,23,118,10,9,221,90,156,0.124,0.765,0.111,-0.6313,2,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,1,1,8,8,1,1,10,0,9,9,0,3,0,18,19,4,0,5,2,1,1,2,0,1,9,3,0,0,9,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,4,18,6,22,12,3,12,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,3,6,76,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389145690325936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806357860191497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162800278380713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467201023727943,0.08229834347918374,0.0,0.6202363976287029,0.0,0.0,0.05587282252723661,0.0,0.0,0.08279287619051964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17400729363443532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05887791735027166,0.08144859696523772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887494888284131,0.0,0.0845114931854039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5880337773765144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06180858244216506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925587175410595,0.0,0.0,0.11557928763048793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983351055438548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05340099427268934,0.0857054658468365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714343174778966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15930346199735004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677817084455687,0.2005377879715078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04916645490954631,0.06616535963333434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060685304241750726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735908507023957
mentalhealth,saskiasensei,2020/01/28,"I get urges to self harm for no reason I'll just be sitting in class, not really thinking about anything and then I'll realize I'm bitting my hand and now I have a bruise.
Or ill get my self worked up over nothing and just sink my teeth into my arm
Yesterday I was walking up the stairs and suddenly got a surge of anger and started to scratch all of my body

I used to self harm before but it isn't the same feeling as when I cut, it's like I can't control my body and my brain just makes me hurt myself for nothing, I am going insane?",3.9497660098522185,3.753560750000002,5.114236453201972,87.91155172413795,70.8103448275862,8.007881773399015,28.64039408866995,7.447530270364453,1.4221221674876852,421,14,96,4,7,140,78,116,0.163,0.767,0.07,-0.8367,0,0,0,0,0,2,5.0,0,0,0,2,6,6,2,0,4,0,6,7,6,4,1,22,16,11,0,0,6,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,7,0,1,4,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,2,3,16,1,14,13,3,15,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,1,7,60,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707678845810987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208319877140036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19512319078413612,0.3970499910432312,0.0,0.19951802815470565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004571136111085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036955454741592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18675457559983605,0.0,0.10157446290619604,0.0,0.1429440134502519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913305545305894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731680386262876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930141373633325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3429860446195983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449685609606908,0.1837607430978196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5593525635232691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650362901394047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452080820020805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15436242451522791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301151156743056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,michymich1223,2020/01/28,"I feel live I’ve lost myself. I don’t know what to do anymore. Please help?  Here’s my story summed up as to why I’m feeling this way. My parents met and had a one night stand that resulted in getting pregnant w/my sister and so on and so forth. They didn’t really have love for each other  growing up. They just stuck out the relationship for me and my siblings. So we weren’t a normal family there were no really lovey dovey moments in my eyes. They had me late so I was the youngest. I felt alone. There was yelling EVERYDAY. I felt like I never had their love. As a kid I always felt scared leaving the house or if I was away from my mom I needed to be home. Growing up my mom turned into  bi-polar/druggie/alcoholic so for as long as I can remember I would help her and clean her up when she was drunk and passed out. Or every now and then she would threaten to kill her self in front of us.Over the years things just got worse and it took a toll on me not being vocal about it and having to grow up on my own when I had family around me sucked. At 8 I would have cousins kiss me when I wouldn’t want that to happen. At 14 I was touched by my neighbors brothers and his friends without wanting to be. Made a report police didn’t believe me because it was 4 against 1. My parents didn’t believe me but they never would admit to it. At 20 I was kept inpatient at a hospital for self harming  and diagnosed with borderline personality disorder, major depressive disorder and GAD (generalized anxiety disorder). I got help and got medication but meds were too strong. So I stopped taking them. Took the herbal route instead. The anxiety in me feared the meds would mess with my head. I ended up in a horrible relationship. I was forced to have an abortion and he knowingly gave me gentian Herpes (sorry if TMI) and later found out in the relationship that his whole family had it and failed to mention it to me after I accused him many times and he made me feel bad every time blaming him. He was very aggressive and emotionally and mentally abusive. Now thankfully I’m out of that relationship. But after all that I don’t know if I’m having a mental breakdown or what but I can’t seem to be happy. I wake up with sever anxiety every morning. Trembling and shaking. I go to work and it doesn’t get better. This has resulted in me leaving my jobs because I can’t seem to cope with my anxiety. My family does t really understand my mental health situation so a majority of the time I feel really alone. Every day I think about killing myself but I get through it. But I don’t know how much more I can take. I’ve been doing my best to stay strong. I just don’t know what to do. I feel like I’m crazy. I can’t hold a job because of all this. My mind won’t stop thinking and racing. Can someone please reassure me that I’m not crazy please? I just don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t keep living this way. I just need some guidance please :(",2.0819872406391617,4.108324764607684,3.8093199976150736,86.80316673622706,78.48247078464107,7.083245886000477,24.385911042213213,8.07648339933343,1.4362809205819227,2310,82,478,42,56,773,270,599,0.179,0.713,0.10800000000000001,-0.9928,5,2,2,0,1,1,56.0,1,0,6,7,26,27,4,4,20,0,55,10,3,5,4,104,110,50,2,14,20,7,9,2,2,7,3,1,3,4,24,34,1,5,22,1,0,9,22,14,0,1,37,11,84,13,70,62,11,65,0,3,1,3,46,28,1,9,26,326,108,5,0.0,0.06959535853553675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277344959061422,0.0,0.12167046486360307,0.0,0.0,0.04887502579988269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17973875633264774,0.0,0.11650535085997048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228959884215567,0.0,0.0,0.055186628242598165,0.0,0.049044081961802384,0.10741908785378247,0.0,0.0,0.1323560477201286,0.06164229106553998,0.051949311250717035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03788138665421647,0.0,0.05059126841604382,0.05961820488083346,0.0,0.0,0.2019577682709972,0.0,0.051402339765479914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066072755586717,0.05202475765147548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979584262944976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22149321488149315,0.06609699179237492,0.14849941326104976,0.04196270028280759,0.16919412779727824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644035863305895,0.045381115730602974,0.0,0.09206511542283027,0.0,0.033382366925272605,0.0,0.1409353110094466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05194214291378777,0.06252808265759817,0.0,0.0,0.060282509356761424,0.06243613614356795,0.0,0.0,0.11811326538532195,0.0,0.0589193701574158,0.0,0.0,0.06777618779962329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657752920819292,0.052209358411323334,0.12997059794781576,0.0,0.1936864183030432,0.0,0.0662594351152255,0.12439089651917537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057393197106563834,0.0,0.10373410632278783,0.05198160536772026,0.0,0.0,0.06411986497440114,0.0,0.10602733691434693,0.11115932395827847,0.0,0.05955148359682681,0.0,0.0,0.13049016563269292,0.05917272398052385,0.17758337202555785,0.0,0.05930900505872003,0.1375873282831122,0.0,0.0,0.04317945740534308,0.08710750797817936,0.09060529766130726,0.0,0.0,0.05512197728198147,0.057551127173870086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03980263684477424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044400806638967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05128807539516023,0.0,0.2579083475083835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051720492064588,0.0,0.0,0.2522520907108675,0.06653911812113138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05880735118291989,0.0,0.0,0.10694640437909828,0.1225538518368846,0.06635763417263403,0.0,0.0,0.06602438422984401,0.0,0.0,0.04976882675144412,0.0,0.0,0.0657527915617317,0.0,0.06260728258260607,0.0,0.09821580792144853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832788204315008,0.0,0.0,0.05407839550454828,0.0,0.0,0.039023160243720184,0.07527434614049851,0.0,0.0,0.10275244042426758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052097139562804,0.0,0.06389047487269163,0.0,0.061148710344935624,0.07065502182484072,0.0,0.0,0.04846530338603143,0.06929082004589784,0.09324756149411363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530022389898964,0.0655792877771177,0.0,0.056621688573105476,0.0,0.04276222989212578,0.0,0.0598594129360082,0.2086302489848766,0.0,0.0,0.037825581779182896
mentalhealth,Jmag124,2020/01/28,"What to do if everythings crumbling The last month has been very very rough, we've had exams and other things have happened with family and especially friends and it's left me at a very low point, to the point where I feel like I can't take anymore and everything upsets me. Ik that sometimes you just have to move on, but its just not working and it's sorta come to the stage of suicidal thoughts? Although not quite, like it will cross my mind now and then. Idk I get that people have rough times but it's all just been ubareably hard and I feel powerless and just a mess. My physical health has taken a toll from it (not self harm) but being ill and its all been too much. What am I supposed to do?",4.0124647887323945,5.0138777112676065,4.240957746478873,89.9487605633803,71.1830985915493,7.651830985915493,25.46760563380281,7.908726449838941,1.1511414084507041,553,16,120,7,10,172,91,142,0.16399999999999998,0.7879999999999999,0.048,-0.9539,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,2,7,7,0,1,6,0,15,2,0,0,2,29,23,15,1,1,11,0,5,2,1,1,2,0,0,1,13,11,0,0,3,0,0,3,4,4,0,0,6,5,10,3,10,15,3,16,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,2,7,82,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16965133366217167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735806278923885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30748586990605625,0.0,0.16126563726215107,0.0,0.17299204420622408,0.12220946101609978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216503362197768,0.0,0.08937483414541532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15127294589561907,0.0,0.15324138027279055,0.0,0.0,0.1818349747420675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944148088728528,0.0,0.0,0.1858635216080092,0.0,0.0,0.16714824444359286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17272771992218328,0.0,0.13654311107807862,0.18181590170878034,0.12575306595883234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185955052713948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234249998242404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18194956396315712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17845896567062558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16918847708187745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18711824967169266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12862021252728573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364853425516636,0.0,0.0,0.1358071584294048,0.09974985942045828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4234416683057442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453795946740708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kitkat12313,2020/01/28,"Rambling of a Brøken Mind 
Fireworks erupt deep within 
Broken thoughts sewn into steel phrases
Drowning thoughts of what could have been
Now ignited my whole body blazes 
Winding words around their shattered heart
I watch and wonder why 
I want to watch them fall apart 
I never wanted to be the bad guy

I tore through every defense 
I want to be free, 
but at what expense?
Why can’t I see? 
I’m broken

They call it Manic Depression 
But it’s my Transgression. 
Fixing me becomes their Obsession.
But my Suppression. 
My hour over and I’m just another session... 

Don’t try and be a savior 
There is no cure 
I’m cursed to live this way
trying to keep the feelings at bay
Its a raging ocean 
Tide ripping In a rolling motion 
Drowning me with every wave
I submit to my grave

Bipolar 
they call me 
Broken 
is what they mean
Up and down and round again 
Pills are popping
People talking
My life is falling
 I’m not myself again",2.626708296164144,5.240173734463276,3.043157894736844,89.8371008028546,80.01694915254237,5.082247992863515,24.57002676181981,6.339386263674448,0.8229389830508471,729,27,135,6,19,225,119,177,0.193,0.7759999999999999,0.031,-0.9863,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,6,0,6,7,2,1,6,0,12,5,2,1,1,29,26,8,3,4,5,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,7,8,0,3,5,0,2,3,5,6,0,0,3,5,23,2,19,19,1,20,0,2,4,0,10,11,0,1,5,84,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17128149920582933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541170185974478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136386271498129,0.0,0.18040174482688465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18143949734523926,0.0,0.0,0.333587063639224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041770956970938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406888291843091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275250454223728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259215173039025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16173725409799278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935646390418579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16086194456442876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518856192630386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153754206166468,0.0,0.0,0.14423664816047035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17793061656747486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16493190906341154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598175184141738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132428720738236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301648351888739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312905422990034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593554053087717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22180109709281268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890353805317876,0.1296556763808907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947869536028753,0.18236888508566565,0.0,0.0,0.17714070989615166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snazzarool,2020/01/28,"Got an appointment tomorrow to talk to a mental health counselor! Any tips on how I should prepare? I tend to kind of minimize my issues until they build up and explode in unhealthy outlets, which is a big part of why I made this appointment, but also may get in the way of my counselor getting the information they need. Any tips on that or anything else you wished you knew going in to counseling?",7.777631578947368,7.244505184210527,7.656842105263159,74.00789473684213,62.94736842105264,10.757894736842106,37.42105263157895,10.125756701596842,3.7661421052631567,318,14,57,6,4,102,57,76,0.039,0.961,0.0,-0.4314,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,3,1,0,2,0,11,12,6,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,9,1,14,7,1,11,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,2,2,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19826752402600847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371983897311402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040231993210869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20711160437424694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25906376119017954,0.0,0.14090290594933425,0.0,0.19829026220696455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635353280541877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25877188577585586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25817832852536915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23459498549258406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24985259655888897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18383509221508051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684813111049426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992747249815583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19679330133512632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22371599689785995,0.0,0.2851043776848887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meeper_meeps,2020/01/28,"I did something intensely stupid, but i don't know if i regret it yet. To start, and idk if this matters, but im an 18F still on my senior year of highschool. Back in October i enlisted into the USMC. I thought it was what i wanted to do. I figured it was smart. The past month, however, I've been having awful thoughts. I don't want to kill myself, but i keep having thoughts of different ways to kill myself as well as invasive thoughts of crashing my car when im driving. Yesterday i had a full on melt down on the way to the monday remedial workout. I decided ""i dont want to do this anymore"" so when i got to the recruiting office i told everyone i was having doubts and my mental health is shit. I told them i want to quit. I hate myself immensely for it. I hate crying, i hate quitting, i hate being weak. They all tried to convince me to stay but its just so fucking hard and idk what i actually want to do. Idk if i quit just because my depression told me to or because i actually want to give up my dream. I cant tell my parents because im so ashamed. I mean. Its not too late to go back and say i dont really want to quit but i dont fucking know what i want to do anymore.",1.215206998094576,2.9459532749004005,3.662899705525725,88.23873895721464,79.99601593625499,6.915018188117098,25.65407933483457,7.893859768569023,1.4634058894855353,916,37,202,16,23,319,124,251,0.251,0.6559999999999999,0.09300000000000001,-0.9911,3,0,1,0,0,2,27.0,0,0,2,4,13,18,10,2,7,1,21,5,1,0,1,39,50,20,2,12,12,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,11,5,0,1,9,2,0,3,7,15,1,0,14,2,42,3,29,35,2,28,0,2,0,2,9,8,3,5,14,139,53,3,0.0,0.0,0.1621653988265416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648035591112641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778034258293078,0.0,0.15195051441084856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912691636171757,0.0,0.0,0.07156427609010353,0.0,0.0,0.08681012891972585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921384231495157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939492506942289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15362854436543508,0.0,0.07970636413328837,0.04722128932477485,0.0,0.06645371703921757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443125947470745,0.3281320183224198,0.0,0.08831952676562277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26925054051192165,0.0,0.0,0.07385315800167255,0.1838509301376531,0.0,0.09132688141857674,0.0,0.09372780435480337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050807972988142,0.0,0.0,0.08373398455597493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632070079272721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922602980695616,0.0,0.07931767725526802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3535007367473123,0.0,0.0,0.05322882360187976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607556199702479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852894763451807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06396583046372359,0.0,0.0,0.058810692130540125,0.08856162330517657,0.066354836363166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726232881015317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638529574606437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381847752082687,0.0,0.056411852460025336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.392063494869938,0.13190407049326733,0.0,0.0,0.07470682479743974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053506473794117916
mentalhealth,13a841,2020/01/28,"I Changed My Community by Writing an Album About My Mental Health I noticed that very few people in my community were having open discussions about mental health, it was still very stigmatized. I knew this wasn’t healthy. I saw other communities thriving with open discussion. So I decided to start it. I spent over a year writing an album that thoughtfully explored my experience with Depression, Anxiety, and Suicidal Thoughts. It came out on Friday, and I’ve already had dozens of open conversation about mental health with people in my community. I’m glad to see my work pay off!

I’m gonna post the album here, but feel free to skip it, if it’s not your sort of thing 😅

Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/album/5SGzYAbr7qeDXJP6ALszJI?si=pAby0LnrQBC-keVnwRtSUg

Apple Music: https://music.apple.com/us/album/im-depressed/1493989368

SoundCloud: https://soundcloud.com/mikey-lax/sets/im-depressed",11.281845522898152,15.04181045864662,8.0231989063568,59.075509227614496,57.1954887218045,10.249897470950105,33.14354066985646,10.436869588844218,4.160209022556392,753,28,95,18,11,213,90,133,0.059000000000000004,0.86,0.081,0.5848,0,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,0,1,6,3,0,0,4,0,5,3,0,0,0,22,17,5,1,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,10,10,0,0,6,0,3,2,2,1,0,1,10,3,13,3,18,6,1,15,0,1,2,0,6,9,0,2,3,60,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999893301554646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091616467186144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582875539144185,0.0,0.0,0.1533791046814474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497575736290107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14182703318964934,0.0,0.0,0.07331077931552646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4623494831682122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31322593417926803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4383443378926611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507090254278806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20103419101516729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885935394853713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553743675698662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262393873357216,0.0,0.11578837818291145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585943997659921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632422869552733,0.0,0.0,0.2302100924183107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17440387806209662,0.0,0.0,0.239262168312238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555369646984693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336814258721446
mentalhealth,SecWoe,2020/01/28,"having a rough time lately so, im a 20 year old female in college. been diagnosed with anxiety and depression since middle school, experiencing it ever since i can remember. ive been on 150mg of wellbutrin for over 2 years now and its helped SO MUCH, but recently it feels like its doing nothing. my minor suicidal ideation is back every now and then. i used to sleep easily at 10pm-8am but now i get constant nightmares and have a hard time falling asleep (last night i didnt manage to until 4am). i just feel. off? broken? its hard to explain but i hate this feeling. im a writer but it gives me no joy anymore, neither does anything else. i feel like a black cloud ruining everyones day. ive always hated myself but now its worse, its all i think about. ive been dating my boyfriend long distance for 6 months and i am constantly feeling like shit for being so sad all of the time when we talk and questioning if he loves me or not. which he does, i know he does! hes super understanding and supportive of my mental health and reassures me often how much he cares for me but my fucking head just cant seem to be okay with that? it feels like i need constant reassurance. im not a clingy mess like this usually. i dont know whats wrong with me. maybe a bout of seasonal depression? i used to live in california but now im in rainy oregon so its possible. i go to my therapist once a week and she keeps telling me to work on self compassion but how am i supposed to do that when there is literally nothing i like about myself? id hate me if i met myself. i dont know what im expecting out of posting this here but...yeah. hi. im a depressed mess",1.3358374546653449,3.6157690385756713,3.3273021760633057,87.88065323112433,82.64985163204747,6.711803494889549,23.3076986482031,7.8897218956490685,1.3243320804484011,1294,47,269,25,36,436,184,337,0.158,0.644,0.198,0.9459,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,0,0,2,22,27,5,0,10,1,22,8,4,4,3,55,50,30,1,4,15,0,9,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,18,14,0,1,15,0,0,2,8,13,0,0,5,11,39,14,32,43,5,44,0,5,1,2,19,10,2,6,37,166,57,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269040757901685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576362656992517,0.0,0.07471881406725969,0.0,0.0,0.06199987639673527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05793318852087938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681597959570763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24425313887239086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048589223844805816,0.0,0.19467532865929507,0.07647033432599748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977963332607044,0.0,0.17660004139816882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293840070277572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815096549131126,0.06347871036894985,0.07199231225511513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285704469361712,0.21529676891559998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696522739179128,0.03936297741166828,0.07227471340751421,0.04281847741761508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498289642465644,0.2231532686438668,0.07732241609313567,0.08008480319837814,0.0,0.0,0.050500015950969854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4882923932592279,0.0,0.0,0.06696724768281732,0.0,0.0,0.1242176378141868,0.061413617321910814,0.0849888245652625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22084916744219746,0.0,0.06652818386068501,0.06667511625378651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799891004552781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569095805334072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075926807125867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060137100655655085,0.0,0.11076977411184312,0.055864985122500266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070316927335556,0.0,0.14458496541265525,0.0,0.07905853827533865,0.08023655103605097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493655169858486,0.07215661164160958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440005134029904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439093163927024,0.0,0.08534756486966569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762499171845928,0.0,0.06858833903318487,0.07859792190688909,0.0,0.0773372681912418,0.12464702005256265,0.0,0.07539620430003859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241169346567759,0.08549697426192215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06055687960468657,0.0658520482187875,0.0,0.0,0.08747762905676057,0.0,0.048275979015474715,0.0,0.0,0.13179721676896675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843346395664631,0.0,0.13014223849428622,0.0829783411753579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06043464208480472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0548497228809937,0.0,0.07677972406120008,0.0,0.08237442368401933,0.0,0.09703528948954952
mentalhealth,beautifulnomad_,2020/01/28,"How has school affected your mental health? Hello, I am in my second year of a 2 year fast track program (that means no breaks in between exam and semesters) and I was wondering if anyone else could relate.

I am trying not to be hard on myself,  but I definitely have gotten more lazy and not as motivated with proactive habits and hobbies that improve my mental health. And I think it's because I'm just so tired of school. A part of me (high achiever here) expects me to meal prep, eat healthy, workout  meditate, be creative etc. All the while going to school and keeping up good grades. 

Has anyone else struggled with this? I don't like making excuses but if I can relate to someone else I'd feel better about feeling lazy.",4.9699280575539575,6.351438258992808,5.281359712230215,81.9552769784173,69.28776978417267,7.2866187050359725,29.727338129496413,7.554174236665415,1.890518848920863,574,22,104,6,10,182,99,139,0.151,0.667,0.182,0.7254,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,3,5,4,0,1,3,0,11,5,0,4,1,28,21,14,0,4,7,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,8,2,1,6,1,0,1,4,1,0,1,2,3,13,3,16,16,4,11,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,3,5,70,17,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19986480371000595,0.2928751439422128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712219528010919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640038553332705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141093222737105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14624198362937146,0.3581718652770372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939264579827553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452844617769953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122425394641206,0.11987381322983234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12802749792672571,0.0,0.0,0.3038327742853127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510019425906107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12703311887600496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982308395050922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953996511350965,0.0,0.0,0.15568086677220458,0.0,0.0,0.28805780285847304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547675262346607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4339254693521431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109494307948243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494101403185203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915768288727484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16426455369141318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703273026466597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15498973582670986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18407051045725328
mentalhealth,G-r-a-y,2020/01/28,"Am I selfish? Tomorrow is my birthday, and currently my friend group is falling apart. More drama stacked onto more drama. Is it selfish of me to feel like they should stop fighting even just for a second and celebrate with me? 

I've been stressing myself thin trying to find a happy middle for them, and I've been doing everything to keep everyone happy, and only one person has even mentioned my birthday outside me actually talking about it.. is it selfish of me to want them to pay attention to me? I feel like a toddler in a teenagers body and I feel like it's going to kill me",5.898242730720604,6.406100442477879,6.682705436156763,75.90309734513276,66.69911504424779,8.935018963337546,34.72692793931732,8.841846274778883,3.089129962073325,462,21,81,7,7,153,67,113,0.185,0.643,0.17300000000000001,-0.163,1,0,0,0,2,1,10.0,0,0,3,0,4,12,2,1,4,0,10,1,1,0,0,16,16,5,1,2,1,0,4,3,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,2,5,2,1,2,0,6,0,2,2,4,16,6,15,13,2,10,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,6,61,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.18356117811947148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20893978269599875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484802229359591,0.0,0.0,0.17974026627023135,0.16905464879811075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853312507051348,0.4031419886356782,0.0,0.0,0.17192253220644285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145327740420594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690314411704703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4004778119341375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671943927462741,0.2081078551814022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756925490943589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746331116605325,0.14306063964006469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642440911313545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15726234590109253,0.2154710977734632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511898885268455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770943952772806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094789260954267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adiostrasero,2020/01/28,"Pregnant women who aren't ""Allowed"" to take meds I am genuinely not sure if this is allowed, so if not, please let me know where would be a more appropriate place to post this. I tried to figure out how to field this through a mod first but I'm feeling silly because I'm not sure how to do that.

I am looking to hear from other pregnant women who have been told they can't take their mental health drugs during pregnancy or breastfeeding. I am a writer and I have been fired up enough about my own experience to want to write an article about this issue.

My own story and thoughts: I am a preggo myself who suffers from anxiety and panic disorder. I take Xanax for panic attacks, which I don't need super often, thankfully. But since becoming pregnant, I've been unable to use my Xanax as it's considered to be a ""known"" cause of birth defects (a Category D drug for pregnant women.)  When you read the studies, the actual risks to the baby appear to be pretty rare, mild,and non-life threatening, and in many cases are unknown as it can't be ethically studied. So it feels like you're being told ""we don't really know if this is bad, but there's a chance it could be, so don't' take it under any circumstances even though you want to die.""

I've become extremely frustrated with the lack of options given to pregnant women suffering from mental health issues. Most of the advice that people are given seems to be along the lines of ""It sucks; sorry; suck it up."" It's made me wonder if women have become suicidal due to not being able to take prescriptions - clearly in some cases the benefit of taking certain medications outweighs the risks, but this doesn't seem to be something frequently addressed by doctors.

If you have experienced this and would be willing to share your experiences, please let me know. I think we all deserve better.",6.9459374999999985,6.956231264204551,7.297863636363639,74.08804545454547,64.48295454545455,10.10818181818182,32.372727272727275,9.766711354998122,3.0526347727272727,1463,52,260,27,20,478,193,352,0.21100000000000002,0.698,0.091,-0.9947,2,0,3,0,0,1,42.0,2,4,2,3,13,22,4,4,16,0,39,8,0,7,5,61,72,24,2,12,14,0,3,1,0,3,8,1,1,5,22,10,0,0,12,1,0,1,11,12,0,1,9,6,24,10,43,47,8,15,0,2,1,0,21,8,2,14,6,183,46,2,0.0907371777818858,0.0,0.08854639651986725,0.0,0.0,0.08866731997582733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170439240208995,0.0,0.0694136926445655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322663897119116,0.0,0.0,0.07576175335342668,0.05531254138380217,0.30063625200626776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024966006953832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321207628795067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244625310748161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094170864984729,0.0,0.10399266683846184,0.0928733463231922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21045263815922716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375576022521256,0.0,0.05993105016223078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775167419400401,0.0,0.0,0.09175888686732607,0.0648226579375246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718099706816331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19289875384084465,0.10226739393739748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18941207869080906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496003397801649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18556982382771828,0.0,0.04432960175234457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619637659460267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08585771155039529,0.0,0.09199325650763228,0.0,0.0,0.10078854928319017,0.0914081605799945,0.1828834671843274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728046759866338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129210554198656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290573419780282,0.0,0.09480103835823643,0.19920434668282985,0.0,0.0,0.0869011342424461,0.09231233040842557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090761732550836,0.0,0.05812855954530174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16520743760512446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505873111329893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06985391247391617,0.0,0.10157284176466047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925174525349167,0.0,0.17103743245807398,0.0,0.40933839186523785,0.0,0.0,0.08353860237725767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058140719715974974,0.08914881647288787,0.07203518371770552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17340652365383993,0.0,0.061604587569122175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836778834749705,0.0,0.0,0.10703827674993678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840059871559184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12891417543887765,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,canadaswampgoblin,2020/01/28,"Laid off from a job I loved, Started a new great job 5 months ago. Anxiety of failure & being ‘fired’ overwhelms me everyday. I literally can not go one day feeling confident about my work - I’m always worried I am going to me in trouble or going to get fired. It’s a terrible way to be.",2.352033898305088,4.015301491525428,5.0120000000000005,80.14613559322035,76.45762711864407,8.109830508474579,30.444067796610174,8.841846274778883,2.717282033898305,224,11,44,5,5,80,48,59,0.262,0.556,0.18100000000000002,-0.5719,2,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,3,12,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,3,0,1,0,3,6,2,8,10,0,12,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,1,6,25,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21022852095313327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973365787890882,0.2569633602956977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814271740526396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529489370038889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991550156969065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390660060041987,0.0,0.4043514232332817,0.0,0.0,0.2614703471412241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4706905091328874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140466586193131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892992909118381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22905114011092664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16070612860425554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678634602058743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882470082063636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17265570729018082,0.2408480538106805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nichie16,2020/01/28,"Feeling anxious in nature Do you guys know how everyone tells you that spending time in nature helps with mental health? Well, on me it has the opposite effect. Sort of. Sometimes when I'm in a forest (and sometimes even in fields), I start feeling nervous, anxious and borderline scared and I have to leave immediately. It kinda feels like I don't ""belong"" there. I don't know what's the trigger - I actually love hiking. It happens maybe 1/3 of the times that I'm outside and it's really annoying. It's always sudden and random. It doesn't matter too much whether I'm alone, with my dog or other people - it can happen anytime, but the company of other humans helps me calm down and I can keep walking further instead of just turning around and going home. I talked about it with a friend and we though that maybe it's an evolutionary trait, because there could be animals hiding in a forest, but I couldn't find any more information about it, so I was hoping maybe some of y'all have some experience or knowledge on the topic",4.71783417935702,6.391017162436548,5.52489340101523,78.84375296108294,70.26903553299493,7.689881556683588,28.36175972927242,8.238735603445708,2.067847648054146,819,30,145,12,15,267,121,197,0.077,0.795,0.128,0.9169,0,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,3,0,1,14,9,1,2,9,0,13,2,0,3,0,40,29,17,0,3,6,0,3,1,1,0,1,0,1,2,16,13,0,1,9,0,1,2,4,3,1,0,1,3,16,6,20,25,4,17,0,0,0,1,13,10,0,8,6,102,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.13425551811002406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424885057687189,0.0,0.0,0.1144752656848958,0.0,0.0,0.09355722533268866,0.0,0.0,0.31084619098663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224728912578243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386579458146923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984421307187338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086845435435456,0.0,0.0,0.13146092665431558,0.0,0.1345769172945179,0.0,0.0,0.20868952405321015,0.09828519136539422,0.0,0.0,0.12574308398228176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10629181663470852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818830293017323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622307476043824,0.24331815740189155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462381483467252,0.0,0.0,0.18443021720004615,0.0,0.1380011660837442,0.13664521897914292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228495182479335,0.0,0.0,0.15121768109532094,0.0,0.0,0.14567440829718353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721327896767328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12416880978056648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41464441855059797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864547630168356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113508438532946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537871973053773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813548812223951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773879482854173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27213477104888445,0.0,0.09737786234954207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057935575003418,0.120248551682147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516891725545913,0.0,0.16044476328259644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14964450588183806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369844050719273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,purplesunset_,2020/01/28,"Coping with burn-out syndrome F, in my early twenties. Few weeks ago, I was at work when I started experiencing signs of an upcoming panic attack. I called my parents who then had to take me to the hospital because it was a pretty intense one (started with heavy breathing and loud sobbing, and I soon was on the verge of passing out and was unable to move my hands and feet or walk). The last one I had experienced was when I was under a lot of stress right before graduating from college. Luckily, a psychiatrist was able to calm me down after holding my hand and talking to me for some time, and she opted out of sedating me because even though I was extremely tired and a bit drowsy afterwards, I was able to regain my normal state almost entirely afterwards. 

I was diagnosed with burn-out syndrome, and I was prescribed an anxyolitic (Alprazolam 0.5 mg) as well as an anti-depressant (Wellbutrin XR 150 mg). I was also given a two week medical leave. I saw it coming because things have been going pretty bad at work, I grew to hate this job because of the constant stress and pressure, as well as poor management practices that are borderline harassment/mistreatment and overall toxic environment. Even the genuine friendships I have developed with some coworkers are no longer enough to make it bearable. It seemed perfect on paper but I found myself stuck doing tasks I don't enjoy or that don't even fall within the scope of the job, and having to work with very little guidance, unrealistic expectations and almost no recognition for my work (this is my first full-time job). The fact that I don't have a clear idea of my career evolution prospects triggers my anxiety as well. 

 Over the past 4/5 months, I had been feeling constantly tired, easily overwhelmed and irritated, often feeling numb and sometimes unable to do simple stuff like going outside. I also developed a general feeling of hopelessness and feeling stuck, lost interest for almost everything that I used to enjoy, and even when I did fun stuff it didn't really spark joy in me. Everything started to seem like a chore. I feel unable to make new real connections with people or date someone, it all seems doomed to fail and pointless to me. 

I also experienced daily physical symptoms that kept increasing in intensity, which I now realize were related to my poor mental health: neck and back pain, jaw and chest tightness, digestion and appetite issues, eye strain, occasional abnormal sleeping patterns and migraines (which became unbearable right before the panic attack). Obviously I knew that something was wrong, but I couldn't bring myself to see a psychiatrist, and kept trying to fool myself into thinking that it's only temporary and that it would get better. And it did sometimes, but it would all crumble down not long after, and those little windows of light kept getting shorter and less frequent, until that state became my usual state. 

The first week of treatment was pretty tough because it's my first time taking psychiatric meds, so I had to deal with the common side effects: extreme fatigue, drowsiness, nausea, vivid dreams, wavering memory and such. However, I was lucky to find support in my mother and my best friend, and by the second week I was already feeling way better and able to regain energy and interest for things. I have set small goals to re-adjust my routine: work-out (which I haven't done in months), eat healthier, pick up a new hobby, travel more often and stop isolating myself. I went to a dance class last week and even though it sounds ridiculous, it really felt like an achievement to me. 

It's been almost a week since I came back to work, and, sadly, I feel like my condition is getting bad once again. The dark thoughts and feelings of hopelessness are back again, though to a lesser extent. Putting those goals into practice seems hard once again, because by the time my day ends, I just feel like going home and watching movies in bed, even though it makes me feel down when I think about it. Thinking about my next move  feels scary and overwhelming, I feel unable to move on with my life and get stuff done. However, one positive thing is that I'm now  less prone to stress and anxiety related to work because I feel almost completely detached from it. But since nothing about work has changed in the meantime, as the same issues are still there, I'm afraid of relapsing again. Even though I wasn't expecting her to, my boss didn't show any support when I came back, and she's been postponing any 1-to-1 meeting with me, so we haven't even talked about it yet, except for the email and text messages I had sent her at the beginning of my leave because she was pressing me for answers about what happened, and I simply said that I needed some rest and that I would be able to talk about it later. In the meantime, she keeps asking my coworkers if they know anything, instead of asking me in person, and some of them guessed that it could be a case of burn-out because they thought I seemed to be overworked and under too much pressure. She belittled the situation and still refuses to acknowledge it, arguing that ""going to see a shrink is something weak people do"" and that everyone works a lot yet I'm the only one who has a problem. I can see that many co-workers are showing signs of being burnt-out, yet they're in denial about it. Some have been 

As my self-confidence and drive were really damaged, leaving this job and starting the search process again seems nearly impossible to me now, although I am still trying to apply to opportunities (and some friends offered to help me with that), but I do it with very little hope. I don't know if I should quit asap, rest for some time and then decide on my next move, but then be at risk of feeling even more depressed because of being idle, or wait until I find another opportunity and allow myself a short break before starting it, but then I don't know how long of a wait it'll be and I'm afraid this might damage my mental health even further. 

I feel kind of lost and I would be very grateful if anyone could share their experience with managing and overcoming a burn-out, or any helpful advice for that kind of situation.",12.564289444237225,8.479331592689295,11.172062041526797,63.690476501305504,56.83289817232376,14.076016411786648,44.50248663434042,11.491704259439757,5.033700882755191,4956,197,845,90,42,1567,486,1149,0.145,0.742,0.114,-0.9905,7,0,2,0,0,2,137.0,1,0,4,25,62,69,5,13,47,0,84,24,9,10,6,196,171,100,0,17,18,2,21,5,2,7,14,3,4,1,61,75,2,10,40,5,2,23,14,39,3,9,55,35,109,30,134,98,25,146,1,14,7,0,37,41,1,34,81,598,170,24,0.1489935790212534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036398700258171685,0.03301845451105016,0.0,0.18649443413985786,0.0,0.04110452985249966,0.08936258348504918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599055720648523,0.039058189648313764,0.05698984006894975,0.0,0.0,0.02604494368123111,0.0,0.0306522551147035,0.0,0.0696444418650659,0.08475085277405968,0.0,0.1145668654425714,0.06220170750839661,0.22706275715738375,0.0,0.09508692138859544,0.0,0.039089892252366434,0.06588635640476379,0.0406655998231413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03803477566537288,0.08520448102898377,0.0,0.0,0.039403862690232036,0.03208619388342957,0.039054233220579514,0.08050456399165623,0.0,0.05947962456530216,0.0,0.0,0.024022133134362963,0.038401459421202926,0.06416397564428777,0.03780633660409313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07623608040224072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03811440690663052,0.0,0.0,0.03299102184390619,0.03848754890578485,0.0,0.24602213437906897,0.0,0.0,0.03559243743359114,0.06695291083143375,0.03643607747727263,0.0,0.0,0.2825086136598429,0.05322052131155409,0.03576430029342869,0.0,0.0680887159895771,0.09505039665155476,0.0,0.04084094226238297,0.05755603477863376,0.0,0.07784299555541058,0.0,0.08467648451615425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04103330624413426,0.0,0.03293863246741082,0.0,0.033367245370412045,0.03677507826188695,0.0,0.07918660362286692,0.0,0.0,0.04993362768404595,0.0,0.03736317698805024,0.036996060585389484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04204890378855646,0.0,0.0777552933755474,0.1478531370922024,0.03310808471888086,0.0,0.07757694240048532,0.06141223088352461,0.06072482640520582,0.0,0.118322015406759,0.0,0.0,0.02630964278158065,0.09098842094176293,0.11199803114771016,0.0,0.0659273144396525,0.0,0.0,0.08132204594474604,0.06333450641153156,0.0,0.0,0.07459077821309143,0.03776402591515416,0.0,0.0,0.04137456952364117,0.03752383898610105,0.07507524199482156,0.039514660520374036,0.0,0.0,0.059462626646552726,0.15835659516404896,0.02738185600038618,0.027619212738368662,0.0,0.07194946352824147,0.07922818079220195,0.0,0.036495518277166315,0.03574083936248506,0.0,0.0,0.07933664951662607,0.10096190512893398,0.05665816537673447,0.039634918226751116,0.08740593126074055,0.04135993432544982,0.0,0.03555780753766536,0.05164669382609659,0.03252386156277752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368502551737035,0.0,0.03564168327524225,0.0,0.03744492480475484,0.0,0.0396182528178137,0.0,0.042396827942953005,0.0715868264397369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361985119853275,0.03543175320887434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904644416217569,0.20345723780020286,0.03885819930283553,0.0,0.0,0.061624514111771674,0.08373751270306833,0.03727529510053639,0.0,0.031560444000567275,0.05735126814911745,0.07367922970398519,0.0,0.13182302762123224,0.0,0.08923984850191878,0.03114132588815152,0.12800373102906687,0.0,0.12792150118339993,0.0,0.08453807390976263,0.0,0.038715344306396636,0.05601231447214418,0.08981654628061389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423853508228569,0.07160180200483386,0.1829817936333272,0.05914212949929928,0.08687935410191612,0.08562310062201782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05057842998002141,0.0,0.036386269272497385,0.0,0.0,0.03217065361549256,0.04102384440940447,0.09220147992182468,0.0,0.029566041986704383,0.1792704929050577,0.0,0.10047234071220933,0.03452963511387371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27117275008108555,0.0,0.0,0.1058407637020786,0.04072527231396531,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snolezzzzz1,2020/01/28,"Has anyone tried to cerebral website? Hey there. So long story short, 20 yrs old, jobless for the past couple months (due to my social anxiety), no health insurance, couldn’t afford my normal psychiatric anymore. Found the cerebral website that offers medication for my mental health issues. will they give me what i need? i know they don’t offer any ‘controlled substances’ so their offered meds are but is not limited to “medications like Sertraline (Zoloft), Fluoxetine (Prozac), Citalopram (Celexa), Escitalopram (Lexapro), Bupropion (Wellbutrin), Mirtazapine (Remeron), Trazodone (Desyrel), and Hydroxyzine (Vistaril).”  y’all think any of these could help with my specific problems? i’ve taken zoloft for years, and my psychiatrist claimed it would help with anxiety too, but it doesn’t, so i’m worried these won’t help either.  Thanks.",8.012141414141418,10.882754429629633,6.7652525252525235,68.41818181818182,63.96296296296296,9.64983164983165,37.45791245791246,10.018931242160765,4.508407407407408,668,34,92,16,11,201,103,135,0.071,0.7909999999999999,0.138,0.8973,2,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,3,2,5,3,0,0,2,0,10,7,0,1,0,19,18,7,0,6,4,0,0,1,0,3,7,0,0,0,6,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,0,12,2,9,11,1,7,0,0,0,0,13,1,0,0,7,51,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22070752792898107,0.0,0.24828255998652776,0.0,0.16093494443740025,0.11346768624122182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18200718906578375,0.1295647911649152,0.17955615238492206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779280953394205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15567065847695286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449852226350734,0.0,0.0,0.3263120820082052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16937478038565926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918306537795592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928022978559314,0.0,0.0,0.14360982924596716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802529016968956,0.32695353391831805,0.16353680982023047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952776450563308,0.0,0.0,0.12032616401797637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899677372189813,0.0,0.0,0.17028216552246908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15491153286759005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15527694682244852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542072450920178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940264136449186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398039767497963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017527036701584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647999305510286,0.0,0.11527675692319905,0.0,0.0,0.1045009153143832
mentalhealth,itsathrowawaybois526,2020/01/28,"This may be a dumb question Hi, I'm using a throwaway because I'm a bit nervous about posting this, and feel more comfortable not having my account attached. 

I've had anxiety for a really long time. I struggle a lot with day to day things, and can be like a ticking time bomb. I'll have panic attacks that make me hyperventilate and feel dizzy, and sometimes I've very easily irritated. I get so worked up that I even make myself sick. Even on my best days it can just stop me right in my tracks.

However, while I lived at home with my parents (I'm 19 now), I absolutely refused to do a thing about it. I just didn't want my family to know I was this way, even though anxiety disorders are very common on my mother's side. 

Now that I'm on my own I think I need to do something about it. But I really don't know what or how. I've tried to look it up but nothing comes up online. I'm broke, and can't afford therapy. Even if I could afford it, I don't have time, as I'm a full time student who works multiple part time jobs. 

I'm just sick of feeling like a nuisance to those around me, and struggling to just get through a normal day. I've been doing it for years, dealt with it as to not have to say I wasn't normal, and just want to finally help myself. I'm not sure if you all are able to help, and if you can't I understand, but any advice would be appreciated.",3.483290839555636,3.860938013840833,5.122728100528139,85.42676561646333,71.9757785467128,8.437151702786378,26.62921143689674,8.532816995589336,1.5831826989619384,1062,33,239,17,19,362,148,289,0.142,0.769,0.08900000000000001,-0.7999,5,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,0,3,18,12,2,4,10,0,26,2,0,4,2,53,51,21,0,10,15,2,3,2,0,2,2,1,1,0,18,13,0,2,8,0,1,1,9,7,0,0,5,5,28,5,32,40,8,32,0,1,1,0,11,12,1,7,19,154,46,4,0.10698069276274999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045402948197502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275053960294066,0.0,0.16367987428894193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523549778282996,0.0,0.12170598225188488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521443734928177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226963687026777,0.0,0.11679520874042085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215439409719957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541537807285808,0.0,0.0,0.2759747861603161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260914227867326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826389544434129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085187609888682,0.0,0.16227795801301148,0.07642702828546175,0.0,0.1171921197466422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111785993006552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434138066053024,0.0,0.10731035751355908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106161830175335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175875819111773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453072536072162,0.0,0.09446591168665804,0.09467454660895956,0.08983683814474233,0.0,0.0,0.09095115932111364,0.0,0.0,0.14282088627565845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932482813614321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096367295114064,0.10265085999109792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255187926791594,0.11878939900161188,0.1158496650696536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245793147185103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984285957599565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13706914236203174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136092708681412,0.0,0.08507534077553426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235896389252613,0.10580664063159056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944064942798054,0.0,0.22367889614861716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082803686439792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234174563402828,0.0,0.14214643727095078,0.06854890823132466,0.10510798746875673,0.0,0.3119065113295063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263286798880221,0.0,0.0,0.1113706740427911,0.0,0.09239696993720582,0.0,0.17654055090755388,0.12619996873128675,0.08491629437370582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15576643693036674,0.0,0.0,0.07599601471263212,0.0,0.0,0.0688920586394217
mentalhealth,admirlj,2020/01/28,"I need a fucking break School has been killing me lately. I never liked school but usually I'd scrape by and get good grades. And now all of a sudden every term in school is pain. I started of OK after summer but ever since winter school has been draining all my energy. I fucking hate going here. The worst part is that I'm not even doing anything in classes. 90% of the time I'm either playing stupid web browser games on my laptop or fiddling with stuff around me. 

In autmn I played a ton of football (soccer) and even though I hated school, I was fine mentally since I was so focused on getting in better shape and I did improve a fuck ton as well. Now I've decided to quit playing because I need to sort my life out. 

My parents still think I'm studying well when in reality I'm doing jack shit in class. And to top it all of the next 3 weeks I need to hand in/ present a bunch of stuff and be graded for all the work. I'm being graded in 6 fucking terms within 3 weeks give me a fucking break already.

This highschool class is intended for people who want to become engineers, in whatever field they want. But to be completely honest I don't even know what an engineer does on a regular day when working. I fucking hate not knowing it because I can't wrap my fucking head around what a person does for 8 hours when working. Like seriously, you can't be saying that every single hour is spent effectively. There has to be at least 3 hours wasted on doing unimportant tasks or repetitive crap, which is exactly what I'm struggling with in school. 

I don't want to work, paycheck to paycheck and waste tons of my valuable time in life on unimportant and repetitive garbage. Don't get me wrong, every profession is repetitive in some regard, but I need the freedom to be creative and take breaks to charge my batteries whenever I feel like it. Not when my boss feels like it.

I've been bossed around for the majority. Of my life and I do not want to have any more of it.

My parents aren't helping me much either, though I haven't talked to them about this. My dad constantly tells me that I'm going to be his ""future engineer"" and whenever he does tell me this I want to fucking punch him in the face. He forced me to play piano for 6 fucking years and now that he finally ""allowed"" me to quit I have barely touched the piano in my room. For months I was trying to enjoy it, against my will, and it drove me insane at times. Whenever I wanted to relax or play video games, he would tell me that it was a waste of time and that I should listen to him. 

I agree, video games are somewhat a waste of time but at least I enjoyed it, and I still do to this day. All my best friends play video games and it's always a blast when we play together.

I've tried a ton of hobbies and activities throughout life and gaming is the only, and I mean the only one that has stuck with me until now. That's why I'm considering continuing in that direction, maybe become a game developer or youtuber and build a brand.

I find business really interesting, and building a brand through youtube would be a great place to start. 

However, I can't find the fucking energy to do any of this right now. I need a fucking break, but school is just pushing me away from what I really want to do right now.",5.496136283807516,5.541648832572303,6.0847184170471875,81.44300316122236,67.52359208523592,9.112890762205833,30.696990984662207,8.841846274778883,2.2936556140967106,2581,91,521,39,39,841,283,657,0.128,0.6859999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.99,4,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,1,1,2,10,30,49,18,1,29,1,50,22,5,5,8,86,103,41,1,15,17,3,4,4,1,4,6,2,1,1,32,29,0,0,10,18,1,4,13,23,2,1,11,6,66,26,83,80,25,92,0,0,0,11,31,35,13,7,53,344,98,21,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801159253395841,0.0,0.043741916165281614,0.0,0.0,0.07149793071323332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04326010151051481,0.14039361891499622,0.0,0.0,0.04939064126362231,0.0,0.0,0.06409158404253228,0.11611744901271265,0.0,0.0,0.05516829677113355,0.046493324154489535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055117970511969365,0.056808799178175426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780577246293061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801139538588272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416469327211188,0.04755199294798855,0.1328758514006622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05316129273919637,0.07511111811398016,0.0,0.057587160889207185,0.09609487962328707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0406149547194662,0.5345947567589555,0.08239595774458051,0.05042931728839816,0.05975275394933699,0.04409268241242709,0.0,0.05795790154334494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557040693462607,0.05395132641592572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035236131800362905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15531068170075332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05816020458651629,0.0,0.05778148746461099,0.0,0.05930052431759671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14852516569204754,0.1027309295578448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052812984785048034,0.0572634408744235,0.0,0.0,0.05297754728761432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04196035911853327,0.0,0.038644526012534576,0.19489756010304068,0.040544728821818865,0.0,0.055908107425348734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03562235672570105,0.07996272954224949,0.055937502132680936,0.0,0.11674409929655792,0.056927490651674635,0.0,0.03644497295939051,0.045901534730629766,0.05492378911950997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182796385808033,0.0,0.0,0.06735455226181393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978788707823909,0.0,0.04180526256830672,0.0,0.3724209699268478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396168939258077,0.0869718304912778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441772274148148,0.0,0.08396391261762064,0.0,0.0,0.054956905839224524,0.12035867303211414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0395256140345365,0.042253257766118886,0.13784380499684695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033684321229370866,0.10329825244546777,0.0,0.15326807373358606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138228515293228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05789771965753684,0.0,0.21704738097907936,0.0,0.08433593430447386,0.0,0.09453233031728384,0.0,0.047435667941352434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15308447161874272,0.0,0.0,0.0746875256741876,0.05747633926941952,0.0,0.03385294227490706
mentalhealth,lizzlebean,2020/01/28,"Coming off antidepressants, is being a shitty person normal? I have taken Zoloft 150mg for three years as treatment for postpartum depression and anxiety. Before and during the pregnancy I took no pills, except for the occasional attempt at getting my bipolar disorder, adhd or pocd under control, nothing long term. Postpartum introduced the daily usage of Zoloft, Adderall, alcohol and Xanax. Which has led me to believe that Zoloft also uncovered addictive tendencies which were NOT present before taking it. I’ve been tapering down to nothing for two months. It’s been so long since I was unmedicated I honestly wonder who this person is. 

If I hear about something remotely sad, my eyes tear up, my head gets hot as the blood rushes to my brain. I read a story about a women who killed her children and the blood rush almost made me vomit. Is it possible that while on Zoloft I was emotionally desensitized? Because I remember reading about that POS dad who killed his entire family and it didn’t cause a tenth of this reaction. 

I am glued to my phone compulsively. If it isn’t in my hands, I’m looking for it. Which isn’t much different than before except I notice it now and feel guilty and utterly out of control. And god forbid someone interrupt me. My flashes of anger are so quick, you’d think I was just always angry underneath. I just have no pause for this meanness. Am I mean? My toddler son pulled a blanket out to wear as a cape but I’d just folded it so I flipped my shit on him. Afterwards I wondered what the fuck is wrong with me? 

Why am I doing this to my kids and my husband? I was always so patient and calm, with intention at least. I can’t compare being off Zoloft with kids as I started just after my first was born. But did Zoloft make me a better mom? Am I going to get better or is this me now? Having to appeal to my rational side for long moments before I react to anything is difficult if not impossible and I have many outbursts where I don’t catch myself in time. Is this relearning how to be decent? That sounds really fucking hard, I didn’t think being nice was such a struggle. 

I feel like a total fuck up. Maybe I should go back on the Zoloft. I decided to go off because I was taking so many pills all the time to feel normal, that maybe it was time to just get back to what actually normal is. Now I don’t know if I’m comfortable being the person I am. I do not like this person. And I know that my family doesn’t either.",3.418660714285714,5.497203687500001,4.8708928571428585,80.49625000000002,74.625,7.821428571428572,25.80357142857143,8.634040054169528,2.0404196428571435,1950,69,357,39,42,651,239,480,0.11900000000000001,0.821,0.061,-0.9708,1,0,2,0,0,0,47.0,0,1,0,6,23,21,7,1,18,0,48,25,8,9,2,67,81,32,2,8,19,4,6,2,0,1,14,2,0,8,30,18,1,3,13,2,0,10,13,13,0,4,17,10,57,8,57,57,6,52,0,2,2,3,21,19,4,9,25,264,87,2,0.0,0.0,0.07883899846669082,0.08807259223986155,0.0970934029809481,0.0,0.0,0.08633951589685505,0.08089911734900786,0.0,0.0,0.06460741631343621,0.13444684319655792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061803825147693885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648295953101989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12424443569179056,0.0,0.09849718422743307,0.0,0.27498400679715257,0.09102221688232323,0.0,0.14290367707409168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018791564989988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299317677929408,0.0,0.06959308936565793,0.0,0.0,0.18122481883955668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958396666322722,0.0,0.0,0.08440793992208083,0.09259188429633083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087742936754786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15232249519521018,0.0,0.12254895216569152,0.057716108510374724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871959502213426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22406605838194607,0.16883693235350988,0.0,0.13774377950945838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237161557351775,0.0,0.08291344045697661,0.0,0.0910557541662796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17876345144041642,0.0,0.0887997059326861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893943834965557,0.0,0.0,0.21448876900631775,0.06784291912050225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644507574914633,0.05392768732970493,0.16381595398122906,0.16232803010521335,0.17600712385457098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461980658206284,0.0644854903196761,0.0,0.0593896539600655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23746997298615374,0.15503960593104713,0.09197949846091874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28216946048232666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107813849736547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162293158489088,0.0,0.051755888404049766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151887118277968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292936647965159,0.06682999444054626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845276843152197,0.062195783395745226,0.0,0.0,0.057183296809995086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08445883433655757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214874540993896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353343089487756,0.0,0.0,0.14132720156864162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976022154413135,0.0,0.0,0.07891970292155896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290005066921308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17522575635292795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833074829265496,0.0,0.05202585552698151
mentalhealth,its2am_bois,2020/01/28,"Any chat rooms for mental health support? Does anyone know of any mental health chatrooms, similar to 7cups if you know what that is.",5.568749999999998,7.947925041666673,4.823333333333334,81.855,69.41666666666666,8.133333333333335,24.5,8.841846274778883,1.91265,107,3,18,2,2,32,20,24,0.0,0.895,0.105,0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,8,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611509086590221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856708666622383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23237474778033845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5645105438754348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918663028894037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5352012051422065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30133022441690377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,manyakdolorian,2020/01/28,"Bipolar II Me and my ex broke up recently but I wanna give her another chance but I need answers I feel like she would never answer truthfully. She likes to post nudes on reddit. I enjoy them as well but towards the end of our relationship, the chats she's having with random men have been overwhelming. Some she talks to on snapchat and that's where shit gets shady for me.

Is it normal for women with bipolar 2 to seek attention so much as they tend to be promiscuous? Or is my ex just making it as an excuse?",2.9381372549019598,4.935020852941179,4.216274509803919,85.01990196078434,75.76470588235293,7.2784313725490195,23.098039215686285,8.167268648758528,1.3090509803921573,405,12,80,7,9,133,77,102,0.099,0.742,0.159,0.7815,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,2,0,4,8,1,1,3,0,7,4,2,1,2,22,13,10,0,4,5,2,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,1,16,5,17,10,2,9,0,2,0,1,17,5,1,3,5,59,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807874747755226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23717089289657986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13539606920876265,0.1912999030403514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990240169714066,0.25687604578119305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616445788203897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874319013570586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19684686541398266,0.19855321175719912,0.2065260879392409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623645517096277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564562929631597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643974283748325,0.2874922262479235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274869186024616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152289652120902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24076363230850314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19022105885994686,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,archontas_,2020/01/28,"I don't wanna kill myself, but I wanna die It would be awesome if I could die from a disease or an accident, but quickly and without pain. I can't do it myself because I'm scared, but if it happens naturally then I'll just go with it because it will not be my fault.

I can't stop thinking about suicide. I can't sleep because of that every night. It's been going on for like a year or two.

Mental health is a taboo and I can't get professional help.

Please help!",1.9799242424242431,3.3083659191919215,4.016047979797978,88.31073863636368,76.67676767676767,6.162121212121212,25.506313131313128,6.6274283507984215,0.87420101010101,362,13,79,3,8,124,64,99,0.256,0.5539999999999999,0.19,-0.9006,0,0,0,0,0,3,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,1,4,0,13,3,1,0,0,20,19,10,4,6,10,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,7,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,7,4,0,1,1,0,10,1,9,13,0,8,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,4,6,57,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514086855126937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342055609758004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3988542085872268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16189932292341033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003933343030834,0.0,0.218412833601424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699225019383174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20425234443033133,0.0,0.0,0.2575956046543325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21259162543955867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938774865601242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19364758032997187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803249493785345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044670335319349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21092907040887876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19238120887604945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922943039678092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16065062852341158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21018696340105827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312550571117445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18770803302478714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852310753193896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365017763951901,0.0,0.0,0.12374186224583092
mentalhealth,balkanbiker47,2020/01/28,Ocd and psychosis I have ocd and had acute psychosis and severe depersonalitization and derealization. Today i live kind of a normal life in a country where mental health is still a taboo. Ama.,4.5691176470588255,7.869416205882352,5.772058823529411,68.81926470588239,78.11764705882355,5.752941176470588,23.20588235294117,7.1686216300943375,1.1873764705882357,157,5,25,2,4,52,26,34,0.085,0.915,0.0,-0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,6,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,2,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,16,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36938012640825896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618715727060505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454521025475585,0.0,0.0,0.3068520865725172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35020194211448386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34047979172734094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39258020775787017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27751686112029605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293928245093076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChickenWasher,2020/01/28,"I don’t know what to do I’m 20 (m) and it’s been just over a month since me and my girlfriend broke up and I honestly just feel so lost, she was my first girlfriend and I can’t get her out my head. I constantly just feel so empty and just not like myself anymore I want to stop feeling like this so bad because it’s just constant pain and hurting, it’s like I just feel nothing anymore and I don’t care about anything I honestly don’t know what to do. I feel just a constant emptiness inside me and that I don’t matter, I just wanna feel like me again",-0.395500000000002,1.7662471166666691,1.5916666666666686,97.9,90.33333333333334,4.2,20.5,5.6839178017228535,-0.15739999999999998,434,15,100,3,15,143,60,120,0.253,0.642,0.105,-0.9545,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,13,12,0,0,2,0,9,2,1,0,0,30,22,11,0,2,9,0,6,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,7,9,0,1,8,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,3,6,20,7,8,19,0,10,0,3,0,0,4,3,0,0,11,68,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30492943147797946,0.0,0.0,0.12651155734580602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12836306589854785,0.0937159857104075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567440093833535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4984017191843102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4664009815129987,0.21965793409603412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076768916051196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032066938733709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15777739966910814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16457747463255018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16897847461426616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30043040659038384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782090975880434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271053912309145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751375491538635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16358585074331686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12717193599271412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12853010720354704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906774247160272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NikolKostik,2020/01/28,"My moms mental health is detroying my relationship... Any advice? Hello people of reddit! Im new here and reaching out because I really dont know what to do and need some advice on family stuff.  


My mom is 59 and I love her very much but at the same time have so much issues wit her. Im 23 and she has always been a helicopter overprotective parent but its getting worse. She had gone through a lot of shit in life and is overall just sad, negative and cries because of everything all the time. Her mother (which she was extremely close with) died about 8 years ago, her brother commited suicide about 4 years ago and her dad died last year. She doesnt really have any close friends, so basically the only people she has left is me, my dad and my brother. But her relationship with my dad (who is 69) sucks, they argue every day and stay together just because they would not make it by themselves financially and kinda need each other. As for my brother, he lives about 300kilometers away and is really mentally unstable. I have not seen him since I came out as a lesbian 3 years ago because he is extremely homophobic. He threatened to kill my girlfriend, wished me to die on my birthday, said that I bring shame to my family etc. But at the same time text me that he really misses me and asks me to ""just"" date guys so he can love me again. (My mom also wasnt happy about me being a lesbian and cried for a few days but she eventually  accepted it.) So yeah fun things!  


Anyway the point is that my mom became obsessed with me as being the only person in our family she could takl to and depends on me too much. She literally says Im the only good thing in her life and her reason to live.  When I moved out at 18 she was calling me everyday for about an hour asking every detail of my day or complaining over and over again about the same stuff and sometimes  she would cry. I also had to call her everytime I went out to assure her Im safe. It was annoying and draining me but I went with it because its my mom and I love her. I also visited her almost every weekend, she would alawys hug me and kiss me a hundred times a day and treat me like Im still a kid. Again a little annoying but I went with it.   


But things changed 2 years ago when I got into a serious relationship, finished school and found a job. I have less time now, sometimes have to work on the weekend and we work a lot of opposite shifts with my girlfriend. So when we are together I dont want to spend the time talking to my mom. And I also cant visit that often. So after a LOT of arguing with my mom we set up times we can talk so it doesnt interfere with anyones schedule. So its way less than it used to be but I still sometimes feel drained or even angry after talking with my mom (we could not be more different) and that affects my relationship a lot. Which is one of the reasons why my girlfriend doesnt like my mom. They have literally nothing in common, disagree on everything and my gf hates that my mom treats me like a child etc. Every time ve visit my family we end up being mentally exhausted and arguing on the way back. On the other hand my gfs family is amazing and I love everyone. So we visit my gfs family a lot more than mine. Which makes my mom feel like shit and really jealous. We argue about it a lot and Im often stuck in the middle choosing between my girlfriend or my mom. I feel like I can never win and there is no right choice. (I also had my share of mental health issues and this situation is not helping)  
If I dont call or visit my mom enough she just gets depressed and cries and makes me feel like shit and guilty for not being there for her. She was always very kind to me and helped me out a lot financially during school and Im thankful for that but I also need to live my own life and all of this is really damaging to my relationship.  We almost broke up because of it last week. So a few days ago I told my mom (I tried to be very sensitive) that maybe she should consider visiting a psychologist because Im not able to help her deal with all of her problems all the time. A professional would do a better job and also lift some weight off my shoulders. Well she did not take that well. She cried a lot and we have been arguing since.. I really dont know what else to do...  


Any help or experience with something similar would be greatly appreciated! Sorry for the long post but I needed to get it out. Also Im sorry for any mistakes, English is not my first language.  
Thank you",3.9598705110497256,4.97653257458564,5.323517783149171,82.08160264157459,71.32044198895028,8.573377071823206,26.62681284530387,8.930421266530582,1.9364506215469617,3520,113,715,66,64,1181,337,905,0.182,0.7070000000000001,0.111,-0.9975,4,0,1,0,0,1,80.0,11,1,3,5,49,57,14,2,40,1,65,20,5,8,7,161,108,81,5,17,29,22,6,6,6,6,6,2,0,4,37,72,1,2,11,2,1,13,20,26,2,2,22,9,129,31,96,70,31,106,0,5,1,8,124,36,4,22,58,510,166,7,0.0318751540672192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062296063290633676,0.14127700421923034,0.0,0.06383672488370913,0.0,0.0,0.20392439353103373,0.05304536329855957,0.0,0.0,0.08670479124526677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022287848858046848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959793244668085,0.0,0.02994775651206095,0.02451002594185225,0.0,0.13601558645425202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028190983465535557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097644288475514,0.0364566846149645,0.0,0.0,0.03371968650851812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050899433635563984,0.0,0.17506680000456962,0.1027841870382676,0.03286188420998472,0.0274540234909751,0.0,0.0992441324518728,0.03330275171953161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14942977269208302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02662760109272697,0.0,0.028231925456586225,0.03293555491720962,0.07109844520280204,0.021053238639660563,0.0,0.107424768263017,0.030458075690946194,0.05729466630763499,0.031180017040265337,0.18029435063105773,0.0,0.06446814255041662,0.06831484930373498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027112989766146643,0.0,0.034949461189281515,0.02462666496259516,0.0,0.04996035720496308,0.0,0.0,0.026735366925141942,0.025493472558294858,0.035142469888288286,0.0,0.03156141393113057,0.0,0.03393169422063628,0.0,0.03147011550784959,0.0,0.0677635964481033,0.0,0.0,0.08546097548738442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031390605995378545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098757257684717,0.06653875884232187,0.0632623439895133,0.0,0.035265135278401506,0.03319306788014705,0.035035502136097636,0.05196500976984969,0.0,0.0,0.034632448159475734,0.0,0.06754309193392216,0.09343554120612324,0.03194727827878841,0.08443903506374559,0.028208508296886606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167929289732279,0.11507428413907475,0.0,0.06383073856348967,0.0,0.03202287657242297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849063273403716,0.0,0.0,0.522645132787978,0.0,0.03387824429463696,0.07029571752491841,0.09454009140892956,0.02458408385755629,0.030785222424777388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030585070005155982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021599429331418892,0.07272747305271908,0.0,0.0,0.03539358642148524,0.0,0.0,0.04419643674804257,0.027832155049488674,0.0,0.0,0.030132323553824187,0.0,0.030527586489989437,0.0,0.0,0.030500217608741862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429402793379956,0.0655459343610291,0.0,0.17110993262395485,0.0,0.027221207410522297,0.030320570854760226,0.025348401889257143,0.0,0.06451871529856844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981581627751851,0.052734913666314345,0.03582900868815673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024539050880075186,0.09457602725417652,0.07136325064190333,0.0,0.03397467311145533,0.05091107842579263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297885068634072,0.034866245002685245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023966148946679727,0.07686012428956301,0.0,0.058692718606172874,0.0,0.0,0.06352930801494365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727992802814914,0.0,0.0,0.030458075690946194,0.0,0.02164113727157688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027529898863378317,0.0,0.07890102102492752,0.018800791725610645,0.05060202726452477,0.02556832591306913,0.0388153504373706,0.057319183117083214,0.08864576149144665,0.028762368682605188,0.0,0.03665485409048068,0.0,0.0,0.04641098358437655,0.0,0.032483505165092644,0.11321597453252168,0.0,0.0,0.1026327707565603
mentalhealth,UndercoverPanzr,2020/01/28,"Have a feeling someone is going to attack me when trying to sleep So I don't know where else to post this to maybe get an answer or pointed in the right direction. I apologize in advance if this is in the wrong spot(and if you could point me to the right subreddit).

But down to the point. 

Im a 28 yr old male, who has to sleep with the tv on or some form of light and noise to basically just pass the time till I pass out and don't realize im closing my eyes. 

I cant even lay with my back to the door for more than 5 seconds without going into a major panic attack that increases by the second. 

This is a every night occurrence that has been going on for as long as i can remember. 

I recently adopted a cat and she helps a little, but its still making me only sleep a hour or two a night a couple days out of the week. 

The feeling I have is that someone is simply going to attack me the second I let my guard down. 

I think I know where this comes from: When I was in the 4th grade my father woke me up pointing a double barrel shotgun at my face asking where my mother was, screaming he was gonna kill me if I didn't tell him. 

He is dead now(2009)

My question is, how do I go about getting over this... Or is this even related? 

All I want is a good nights rest.",3.1481111111111133,3.5466148481481485,4.7259259259259245,87.89666666666668,72.74074074074073,7.481481481481483,25.0,7.3871296695380915,0.982222222222222,979,27,220,10,18,331,152,270,0.10800000000000001,0.8490000000000001,0.043,-0.9684,0,0,0,1,0,1,23.0,0,1,0,1,13,8,4,1,24,0,25,5,5,2,1,37,43,19,2,5,11,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,11,10,0,1,9,1,0,10,5,7,0,4,6,5,30,1,38,34,8,51,0,0,1,0,14,25,0,9,15,162,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633129835068166,0.3516788762499008,0.0,0.07923370911230364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876242333626594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227145349068747,0.1140151232992,0.0,0.06645421262674728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860792071107921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611786378392662,0.0,0.08681817453194096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10420327718070574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767143261608143,0.0,0.29280856715803955,0.08642758236906685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906755309322828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10147660186885947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22260825177556884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400181611736565,0.0,0.11325947966929277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053684523039918,0.0,0.0,0.1032761597264978,0.0,0.09118981539187268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878200487916794,0.0,0.10352054678759016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900966349627385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10812629831852766,0.0,0.0,0.07836884734438825,0.0,0.1208987625776503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896357784370579,0.0,0.09868671349377288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11543174625285132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10174253460906753,0.0,0.11672763576424515,0.17599632368957122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093522593285909,0.0,0.17461600470510144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229027558259057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006412673344086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602579585353258,0.0,0.0,0.0600852039041485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699594353552925,0.0,0.1006580415404373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06077743312888,0.0,0.08265488183043504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993297781327072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266134820321418,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sixkillermike,2020/01/28,"THE PRISON IN WHICH I LIVE I’m trapped in a prison.. this prison treats me like no other prison I have ever experienced... this prison degrades me... this prison stripped me of my hopes, my dreams and worst of all my happiness and humanity... I don’t eat in this prison... I don’t care for myself in this prison.. this prison is completely void of any hope and dreams of ever being released... this prison is inhuman. I would not wish it on my worst enemy... walls of flesh, blood and bone keep me forever trapped in this prison... this prison is my mind...",1.4869230769230768,4.089971320754721,1.9503773584905664,95.60224238026129,85.79245283018868,5.903047895500728,18.531204644412192,7.321109707123232,0.2739834542815673,424,11,92,7,13,129,56,106,0.36,0.503,0.13699999999999998,-0.9885,0,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,0,2,9,0,0,2,0,8,4,3,0,3,14,14,4,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,12,4,1,1,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,1,15,6,12,12,3,9,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,2,3,60,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666301028047299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498263650184294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569112980243953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507288184742172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4432907858703424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26084102689685856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4867439538806824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21779562210805872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971021526557846,0.0,0.21636766767368554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474123805852477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817746063472632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17406364012458536,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alicia_Mean,2020/01/28,"Research Study Hi everyone! 

I am a student doing some deep research on mental health issues. And I want to ask for your help. I would appreciate greatly if you can spend 5 minutes and fill out a small survey here: [https://forms.gle/YW8nMcEe9ZS9c5md8](https://forms.gle/YW8nMcEe9ZS9c5md8)

Thank you very much in advance 🙏",7.7346938775510194,12.011629816326533,5.923673469387758,65.06061224489798,77.36734693877553,5.248979591836736,25.367346938775512,6.868970318607317,1.4598897959183676,267,9,36,3,7,78,43,49,0.0,0.8,0.2,0.8172,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,3,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,7,7,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,5,6,2,7,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,2,0,23,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016005105415583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082714718911159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3556830388195579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34292356204075497,0.0,0.0,0.21624134244450807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3367251650147394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3251190002863238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23715838703373576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29701959732463185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661903105968531,0.19028607705821413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291757067312175,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BubblegumFight,2020/01/28,"How do I say I wanne change doctors, if my doctor is convinced I should see her so made an appointment for me? Recently I had like a real bad mental outburst (let's call it that) and I made an appointment with this male doctor that also works where my official female doctor works. (I can't really comfortably talk to her).
 But I didn't show up at the appointment 'cause I got cold feet talking about it, and my female doctor started calling my father to tell me I should see her (she knows me from when I was little), which totally broke my trust because I'm an adult, and she is still calling my father! So he had to call me to call her, urgh. Eventually I did, and she was so convinced that I shouldn't even be talking to her colleague that doesn't know anything about me, so she scheduled an appointment of her own to talk with her and stated that know she really expects me to go to the appointment tomorrow. I aggreed because I felt really cornerd, beause that's what happens in my mental state. I really don't wanne go, I'm thinking about finding an independent doctor 'cause this goes just over the top of my head such things happening. But what do I do?",7.0133697234352255,6.2452034628820945,7.311015283842796,76.63572234352256,64.58951965065502,10.602765647743814,33.49381368267831,9.928628108626363,3.0937682678311496,919,33,177,17,12,300,114,229,0.042,0.895,0.064,0.5823,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,3,15,7,0,0,9,0,19,8,2,6,1,29,36,15,0,5,4,2,1,1,0,3,6,1,0,2,14,7,0,0,6,1,0,2,5,2,0,0,10,5,42,5,21,21,2,17,0,1,2,0,28,7,0,1,7,127,56,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276014136019074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748723569141527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596812090677807,0.11092641459612664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.464525903250997,0.0,0.0,0.18693195360412232,0.09624936436484624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5587579450214681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060094296439465976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873592316889612,0.0,0.08315803562121216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341699080874546,0.0,0.07276848580928177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16091429730930826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933761786579098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000783636959766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303764887429168,0.0,0.04445035122090552,0.09119020803302767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218315899877984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833816237343109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035600944170011,0.2331475840625908,0.0,0.0898360562726068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235439655968759,0.0,0.0,0.14500547348088275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439918196313488,0.0,0.07266020899057768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29251905435141906,0.07952432076178585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604459506015099,0.05829908930942805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247536178650754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sheepieweepie,2020/01/28,"[Big trigger warning] Someone I met recently; insists she has ""bad morals"" and due to a past experience feels that men are ""entitled to rape"". What do I make of this? I have recently met a **young** adult who has disclosed some troubling aspects of her thinking, and I am in a position where I am feeling uncomfortable and unsure about what it could mean.

Hints at sexual trauma ranging from incest to rape have apparently lead her to conclude that her 'morals' are simply not good and that she insists she believes that men are entitled to rape and has continually gotten herself into trouble in the past by dating 43/45 year olds, some who have even encouraged discussion about taking kids?

The thing is though she talks as if she knows why it's wrong, but is very convicted that she feels the way she does.

Otherwise she appears to have average, troubled teen habits and behaviours. Does this sound indicative of anything and should I be addressing it or just hoping it won't progress into something tangible.

I'm sorry if this is a rough topic or not allowed, I'm just very concerned right now as to the proximity of this person to my current living situation.",8.087342767295603,8.345865438679244,7.8311320754717,70.38352201257864,62.066037735849065,11.028930817610064,37.949685534591204,10.686352973137794,4.235517610062893,931,43,155,21,12,297,130,212,0.136,0.82,0.045,-0.9517,3,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,3,8,12,3,0,8,0,20,4,0,5,0,35,35,15,0,5,9,0,4,0,0,2,0,2,1,5,18,9,0,0,7,0,0,2,3,9,0,0,3,6,19,3,23,28,2,23,2,0,0,4,24,8,0,8,12,110,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13489810922738446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687235575650192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468980685766945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088252171640524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28690757594675514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827236244651403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16035224621984914,0.0,0.0,0.24865953699361976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749434884599696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628166868360961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009009612965514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475071136772094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942267172069096,0.0,0.0,0.17856476596422866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720140095664056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3129741017196081,0.0,0.14313489866157705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32371664606510697,0.0,0.0,0.13999292391202964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18426102896470808,0.0,0.0,0.1388949754633561,0.1261991590203998,0.0,0.18350306741657105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123252845303989,0.13175846524450066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089059404920944,0.10503792376320524,0.16105763110610893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705141979032736,0.0,0.13011777262126129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791879102898453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792286476921882,0.0,0.10556373529449001
mentalhealth,thehttprincess,2020/01/28,"How do I combat self-loathing? And feeling like nobody really likes you? How to also deal with exclusion ? Feeling super excluded by everyone— my friends, family, dance team. Everyone close to me. I feel lonely. 

I don't know if the problem is me or them. Please help me stop being sad.",1.6111792452830187,4.362001320754722,3.4692216981132056,81.98987028301887,92.39622641509432,7.178301886792452,23.60613207547169,8.07648339933343,2.2811905660377363,222,9,38,6,8,74,44,53,0.244,0.461,0.295,0.5622,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,1,2,3,7,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,0,13,8,6,0,2,2,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,4,2,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,3,9,4,4,7,0,3,0,2,0,0,6,1,0,2,3,24,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223393853084812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866352968886801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656682590853883,0.0,0.0,0.2621006370696938,0.0,0.4217388691497906,0.19862370020089426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148042205317844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186356722005762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527972573370132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27166147790387746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051919320585356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660358387725917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781122519746641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900444842879584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23244437388566924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rubecubez,2020/01/28,"Help please I really don't know what to do anymore. I thought i was getting better but lately i still can't do anything. I can't even come out of bed to go to the toilet or to make something to eat, even if I can't eat anymore. This depressive episode has been affecting my feelings for others too. I have an amazing boyfriend who i love a lot but these few days I've been doubting that feeling since my brain doesn't seem to process my feelings correctly. I don't feel the same love as normally for my friends and family, I can't seem to feel that type of love right now and it hurts to think that I don't love my friends and bf anymore. It scares me because I can't see the difference in these feelings and which ones are real and which aren't. I don't want to hurt my friends and bf with these sort of thoughts. I wanted to talk to them about it but my bf has been hurt so much and I don't want him to feel like i have serious doubts about my feelings for him since these might be fake you know. I don't want to make him feel unloved when i still think that i love him. My feelings are just so fuckin messed up rn, i have no idea what i should do. I can't describe this confusion and fear. My depression is getting worse and suicidal feelings are coming up, i might not even love my friends and bf anymore bc my brain has completely messed me up. 
I'm sure how anyone can help, but if all else, i just wanted to get this out.",4.063577548522471,4.26867890033223,4.4269592586116495,91.53998076586815,70.62790697674419,7.931526490645218,28.798915894387132,7.669130373188453,1.3902784053156148,1123,39,261,12,19,353,136,301,0.161,0.606,0.23199999999999998,0.9794,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,1,1,15,30,1,5,5,0,36,11,2,4,3,68,76,22,1,9,10,0,11,1,8,3,0,0,1,0,20,15,2,0,20,0,0,3,16,16,0,1,6,12,44,14,30,66,5,16,0,5,1,7,24,7,1,12,7,173,64,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026287879584885,0.05334234351600359,0.0,0.06277852399607894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04650445683516082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674705366879608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032527633315864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314307143220584,0.07998651675747448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04919944897265338,0.0,0.1314134855525363,0.0,0.0,0.07970472312360746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15612333902548273,0.0637288350949373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511625139052906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191753711936796,0.0858452095383598,0.4243085560244158,0.054500162577573986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357596788196094,0.0,0.11957199428186215,0.0,0.0433562285646566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022684768883594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450036460825246,0.08611986640527611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385177959983588,0.0,0.08605618708378304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03727046343626289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06485732967537665,0.41311739191388136,0.0,0.10184566502342013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16185902501413466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608045794819329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474604270840075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05169472327654495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374131535023742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683244578300423,0.048872046386503235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514953533024408,0.0,0.0,0.07637759673770893,0.0,0.06079165910938258,0.1388994603890123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621244418838207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058730229639414815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184739099118318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344669016251413,0.0,0.0719005373460611,0.0,0.0,0.06131740481325644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776454029243101,0.0,0.12112830139437145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22498319532490005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774398965805329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cmadison_,2020/01/28,"Feel like I'm faking not being ok I don't even know how to say what I want to say - my thoughts are all over the place. I just feel like I'm faking everything. I've booked therapy sessions for depressive symptoms (not diagnosed), but I feel sick just thinking about it. I don't feel like I deserve to go, that I'm fine and I'm just making it all up. Sometimes I feel ok, and when I feel ok it negates my memory of the majority of time where I feel bad. I can still laugh and smile around people, watching videos of my fave band makes me feel good, etc. I just feel like I'm lying to everybody and that I'm really fine. I don't know what to do.",1.3510869565217405,2.887589398550727,3.1747101449275377,92.7842391304348,78.92753623188406,6.918840579710146,21.644927536231886,7.793537801064563,0.689249275362319,499,14,118,8,12,167,72,138,0.16699999999999998,0.628,0.205,0.7088,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,11,15,0,0,2,3,7,3,0,3,2,31,30,7,0,1,7,0,9,4,0,0,3,2,0,0,7,5,0,0,13,3,0,1,6,4,0,0,1,12,16,11,13,28,4,9,0,1,1,0,3,5,0,0,7,65,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226220809081154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501115938063004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863939954259095,0.13980807855424696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15362186985170107,0.09097914524103476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379614976954885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6268312140012615,0.3936196676309632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828354756309733,0.11553380798965104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15140188604654525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26918061775232976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18389145518195596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549490477112647,0.0,0.14391400475125365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824284986177346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21908039675818994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623313522998054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11000317997992773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431695949471446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15752319020566485,0.0,0.0,0.08826130977413678,0.0,0.10935398969611196,0.08032010407554196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124545540601696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SummerRain04,2020/01/28,"I’m not sure how to do this. Hello, I’m S. I’ve never been checked for mental illnesses but I believe I have anxiety and depression(I’m not trying to be a know it all, sorry if I’m wrong about anything). I started 9th grade back in September and it was going well until something got triggered and I just suddenly started doing less and less work. I was constantly crying at night and having anxiety attacks, I never told my parents because I was afraid of being yelled at for it.. I slept all day and night, trying to get the days to go by much faster. The end of the semester is in a few days and I’m not sure how I did. I tried to do as much work as I could while I was feeling better. I was also really, really stressed and didn’t drink much at all. Causing my period to stop for a few months. I’m still not drinking as much as I should be but I got a bit better. I’m posting this here cause I could feel myself cycling around again, I don’t want to relive all that pain and guilt again.. and I was hoping you guys, could possibly give me advice? This is my first post on Reddit, so I’m sorry if I did anything wrong or anything like that.",1.8892717086834736,3.6256422689075656,3.703949579831932,88.69301120448179,77.99159663865547,6.550140056022409,22.677871148459392,7.447530270364453,0.8839249299719887,892,27,188,12,21,300,126,238,0.175,0.742,0.083,-0.9669,1,0,3,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,0,5,13,14,1,3,7,0,25,5,1,5,8,44,47,25,0,8,10,1,2,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,8,11,2,1,3,2,1,2,8,7,1,1,14,3,25,7,26,26,13,34,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,4,24,137,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735703046147287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967386839604372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524329593153968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24596036510218974,0.08869159279341185,0.0,0.1133432141345146,0.0,0.07660912154592513,0.0,0.06073336577526415,0.0,0.0,0.11224860151991836,0.0,0.17622882031492207,0.10876987399644304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20469437788391828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766435660108037,0.0,0.2386387252663385,0.0,0.10943859294171522,0.19275882358903815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19519843474117607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824237942098502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075158182618517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474500734498952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052052427942114364,0.09557392654363632,0.1132437562871339,0.0,0.1593660114827708,0.0,0.0,0.09864910799145868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895481354605876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05475390046372159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04867405927374994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004033464100323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952350925563527,0.0,0.2929572946080977,0.0,0.1536811974664453,0.0,0.0,0.18699152685485212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601306952639028,0.0,0.11062703770866998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123175640578374,0.19083550457789564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765072732267785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669984258495867,0.0,0.22305467792274147,0.1410368878516492,0.0,0.07956444037245536,0.08329492513740956,0.11412553243739565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877997048564504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520048767791513,0.0,0.2029261641211866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587642029381746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957910278731272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450632770000547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21785896469379346,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jackaboss8,2020/01/28,"What is the point Just went to see my gp after a while of not going due to the fact every single time I go, I get given anti depressants and sent on my way.. only to receive the same sort of treatment again

This time I have been REFERRED by a team of therapists that work around helping people cope with abuse and trauma etc,  the dr looks at her computer and says ""what can I do for you"" and I say that the team had referred me to be seen by my gp to see if theres anything further that can be done to understand further what's wrong with me.. (I've been hearing voices in my head convincing me to do horrific things, and I see people that aren't actually there) I've not had the courage or saw any point in telling anyone this because I thought it was just some silly thing that must just happen when I'm in a low mood. The last time I went to see my doctor, I tried to hint to them that my OCD thoughts had become a physical presence rather than just my own thoughts and once again.. anti depressants and ""theres not much we can do unless you take anti depressants"" oh by the way, I did take them and I felt like absolute shit, yes they work and lower my mood but it completely changes who I am as a person and makes me the most dull human being on the planet, I lose interest in almost everything and even still the voice is still there convincing me and overbearing.

They just aren't listening to me and I don't know what to do, honestly every time I go I feel like they think I'm somewhat of a nuisance even though I only go around twice a year, I know they're overworked but I'm pretty much ready to hang up my coat of life most days of the week.

Should I change surgery? Should i move? I don't know what to do. I'm worried I'll go somewhere else and be given the same message over and over",4.170645665773009,4.553766756032172,4.89698726541555,87.6350072609473,70.44772117962465,8.146961572832888,26.801720285969616,8.07648339933343,1.4088481680071483,1412,42,309,18,24,456,186,373,0.102,0.816,0.08199999999999999,-0.2763,1,0,0,0,1,0,27.0,1,2,5,5,20,19,1,0,20,1,31,5,2,1,2,59,69,24,0,5,14,0,2,2,0,3,3,6,0,2,18,20,0,0,12,2,0,11,7,9,0,1,19,15,45,8,42,43,11,46,0,6,7,0,23,17,1,8,18,209,63,6,0.0,0.11070965467731952,0.09118275377183027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09356542372503088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354156284358525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533455549674594,0.0,0.0768921402711725,0.16636061808847966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05695940252477445,0.1031957723821574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19769164297148,0.0,0.09796876503025713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060260271998525176,0.0,0.2414360084013868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563853304694876,0.0,0.09562029557168816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805609650434601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042089199235958,0.12343084315133665,0.0,0.1574523752495559,0.0,0.08397673502241608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04724544598335717,0.06675267080153502,0.08971586542562468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04881789701097482,0.0,0.2655170109312233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262758934202641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589512769822917,0.0,0.10531227657794316,0.0,0.06263003308830616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405450117099098,0.07616506277301438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599856146555855,0.09129891944231523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846502758327857,0.10453407484337476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062371099720987276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931061746235494,0.13737648369348088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950923285169634,0.0,0.1421287792155092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295573461514605,0.08158712356030431,0.0,0.0,0.17665966581269724,0.0,0.0,0.09506081359106143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486125090434252,0.0,0.0,0.29783438551998465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591354724480357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924063331523432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14050864202938096,0.0,0.08166959715180419,0.0,0.0,0.10848960538212006,0.12415312417117487,0.059871786298940535,0.09180311001897798,0.22253982131389216,0.2179395759716526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634387864476232,0.0,0.0,0.0972730473512036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833468136016714,0.07495093936457595,0.0,0.0,0.1732373384439687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360490643114375,0.09489159923078126,0.0,0.0,0.10216061883959067,0.0,0.0601714997215475
mentalhealth,MrBolkvadze,2020/01/28,"Leg movement thoughts Greetings. I'll try to make as short post as possible to explain my current situation.

This all started two weeks ago. Whenever I'm moving, I keep thinking about my left and right movement which is really weird and at the same time it makes me think that I'm walking wrong. I have no idea what it is and it gets harder every time not to think about it. It occurs during my walk to work when I'm listening to the music in my headphones. 

Any ideas what it is?. Thanks.",2.16288659793814,4.5471309072164985,3.1558865979381467,89.7132113402062,80.1340206185567,5.9418556701030925,24.13298969072165,7.1686216300943375,1.0204482474226797,386,14,77,5,10,123,67,97,0.07400000000000001,0.8690000000000001,0.057999999999999996,-0.1513,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,4,1,1,2,1,16,19,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,11,3,0,1,7,0,0,5,2,2,0,1,1,1,7,1,11,18,2,18,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,7,44,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866856351880088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939448877719414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031608832413227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941157479022417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4295978297338249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691264225744886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20673588438828847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25402197244455377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20223371918505129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145080712086751,0.1822322107344627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189594537623633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16249502091845627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21387866557377924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467862767551014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751809608192566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3657643359858401,0.0,0.15105822143721592,0.2219034184490268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918519743120369,0.0,0.18587241168257893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15262826484647687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13852349814347742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20803739247727893,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,survivednation,2020/01/28,"Ritual that will make you happy (Neuroscience). Get Social

If you want to keep your brain happy, be clear on who your support network is. Know who matters and nurture those relationships.

The best thing to do is to talk with the person in real life or meet up for an activity. The next best thing is talking on the phone, which is better than texts or emails.

Seeing someone and hearing their voice activates your mirror neuron system in ways that texting can’t match.",4.4280232558139545,7.01740569767442,4.518779069767444,81.8121220930233,73.41860465116278,6.625581395348838,24.703488372093023,7.645422480735847,1.4617023255813957,374,12,63,5,8,116,66,86,0.0,0.723,0.27699999999999997,0.9794,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,5,1,3,0,7,0,0,5,0,8,3,2,1,1,13,16,5,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,8,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,6,7,11,14,2,8,1,0,1,0,17,5,0,3,1,45,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.397394174718738,0.1674528421545513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21136227020583356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892056230502932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4031046765935711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21339611606724726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16829107533010934,0.0,0.0,0.10405444734082726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373404450479262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12638365504757568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20136162896738366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16532142172410325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155065092314519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032766581115136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508767618706843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19300482658425025,0.16042429224914415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21485693729206945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043631846892689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25157365652555186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167563604363474,0.15028658532941666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fudgalicious,2020/01/28,"It's been well over a year now, and I'm still completely sure of what I saw. It slammed the bathroom door shut on me when I reached toward the knob to try and let myself out. I plainly saw the rolling ""fog"" at least twice. It played with the water a bunch. I remember it vividly. I made distinct mental notes when undeniable, physical evidence occured. It left no doubt. I am naturally skeptical to a fault, and part of me wishes I could disprove it to myself. It is there. It is in all of us and everything. Love is urgent. We have more purpose than we think.",1.653108108108107,4.043230459459462,3.2193018018018016,88.45706081081086,82.24324324324327,6.582882882882884,25.466216216216218,7.793537801064563,1.5475459459459464,435,18,89,8,12,143,78,111,0.085,0.773,0.141,0.659,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,3,0,0,0,6,7,1,1,7,0,8,2,0,1,3,17,15,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,9,8,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,1,1,4,3,14,4,14,9,5,13,0,0,3,1,4,8,0,1,5,69,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593624951174573,0.0,0.0,0.1975046309163904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22231999679188194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687679764943021,0.25295234737632066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232608733879476,0.2340672554304334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492905439385669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26787735250498274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28022172504791903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975498160949264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23314307863790945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585045588442043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16794783454907766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29755537281110256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22241512915496456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844630248842772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929802011814734
mentalhealth,julychild111,2020/01/28,"How to Handle Crying Hangovers I can't be the only one who has to cancel (or worse, struggle through) obligations the morning after an hours-long hard cry. Any suggestions on how to make that transition back to normalcy a little easier?",4.756627906976743,7.427627860465122,5.616453488372091,73.9423546511628,72.72093023255816,8.951162790697676,29.3546511627907,9.516144504307137,3.380074418604652,190,8,29,5,4,62,38,43,0.303,0.6459999999999999,0.051,-0.8883,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,3,0,4,4,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,7,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,22,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19561839475578094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211924790455878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6319611343285672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25768650277347416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883104937550485,0.0,0.25456969711778504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19201501915535585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19492559212793212,0.21877809102033702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007242753397313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931497115752956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jodyleigh88,2020/01/28,"Bipolar How do i cure my bipolar? I can't stand this much longer, even when I'm high I'm aware that i don't want to be because i know what happens afterwards,  i would do just about anything to be like normal people , i want to work i want to learn i want it all gone , it's all I've ever known and for some reason right now more than usual i want it gone , there must be some way? Medication does not work therapy doesn't work",1.3169565217391297,2.8449817826086985,2.8754347826086963,94.92989130434783,79.0,5.9043478260869575,20.195652173913047,6.6274283507984215,-0.001330434782608858,332,8,79,3,8,109,58,92,0.08199999999999999,0.8859999999999999,0.032,0.1901,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,8,1,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,2,4,21,21,3,0,8,2,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,0,10,1,7,14,6,11,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,6,48,16,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15717196459771016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642830028606847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671403240111691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12614987722822285,0.17276520144908178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16889555292724692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20179587370582688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496542524274344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331012561095636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924065772852256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404027235780079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18713377809133352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241133977333708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963738623300545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631080154277272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21841852934973344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21035314357944127,0.0,0.5632666803840992,0.15160231725331128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41713818819643816,0.0,0.0,0.13567680993883874,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eli_subtopewdiepie,2020/01/28,i want to go back please talk to me i want to go back so much i miss when i spent time with her i want to talk to someone and they hmu all the time i want to go back when i lived with my friend i want the sun to shine again forever i want to be back i want to not be sad i don’t want to live like this i want to kill my self so bad but i’m to scared because no one really knows what happens when you die i know we’re all gonna die and that life leads to nothing so i can do all the things i want i can drive over the speed limit to see if i will die i can vape i can self harm i can fuck someone or even do drugs and drink just to fill my meaningless life that we work to die for and live in debt be unhappy or get a divorce i don’t want to do it so someone please tell me why i feel this way i want to be happy again so give me this answer why do we live....... talk to me,-0.2106052855925,0.6586991642512103,1.9849104859335045,102.51936061381076,81.51207729468598,5.6435350951975,17.00738846263143,5.900188976854957,-0.8874516055697641,665,10,193,4,17,225,96,207,0.239,0.631,0.13,-0.9914,1,0,2,0,1,0,7.0,2,1,1,3,16,10,2,1,5,0,16,5,0,1,3,35,43,16,5,13,6,0,1,1,1,2,3,0,0,2,8,8,1,1,4,1,2,6,4,7,0,1,1,3,35,3,24,36,4,21,0,2,2,1,14,2,1,3,13,119,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619547721421949,0.07111145990716293,0.05191743056194241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3535624450793691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343190807977892,0.09876747618948588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056252453014445515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043063340774020166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06580034252313073,0.07873615283913099,0.044496600489181096,0.08170060446217453,0.14520827502051692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075313502986614,0.09066258486478873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942254253252662,0.0,0.09361186520897732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031290990406306,0.04160862913252219,0.0,0.300818506441759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06260804833668987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172069118940564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057711827828503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186977086530534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05456060015247647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526771077390499,0.0,0.06786761861866028,0.0,0.17769694064524655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164869105462072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20536367844794412,0.07444031101461057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05658162583782045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932392459072983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6028092900749108,0.06760214449313019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537011782932503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06200308936118239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ihateparties669,2020/01/28,"Can intake interviews be done by interns? So I inquired in this psychology clinic and planned to schedule with them but they told me the intake interview will be taken over by one of their interns.   
Is it okay if an intake interview is done by an intern?  


Thanks!",3.559591836734697,6.259450265306128,4.607510204081635,79.48391836734696,76.95918367346937,7.185306122448982,28.16734693877552,8.238735603445708,2.389682448979592,209,9,35,4,5,68,39,49,0.0,0.87,0.13,0.7815,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,3,1,1,2,0,0,3,1,8,1,0,0,0,5,11,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,5,2,8,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,1,31,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8084699632704319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676707252675827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636744822324529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3774514171349608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ethanturner93,2020/01/28,Offshore work Are there any other offshore workers on this subreddit?  I feel depressed and lonely every offshore roll I do.  I constantly ask my self if I can continue this.  But if I stop I’ll undoubtedly take a major pay cut.  Idk what to do or how to make it better.,2.532264150943398,4.705466000000001,4.574188679245285,81.14769811320755,77.67924528301887,7.258867924528303,27.581132075471697,8.238735603445708,2.1539237735849057,210,9,39,4,5,72,42,53,0.235,0.7120000000000001,0.053,-0.7906,0,2,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,2,4,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,1,10,8,6,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,6,1,3,8,1,4,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,3,3,26,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357319296849687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32406826472020195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30658120902450225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37460238974100935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985666578372537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920651506670225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17527520023231666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23138964538840026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616285486965258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898125154398497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26063549463313435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523632330299794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheAbsoluteFewl,2020/01/28,"Should I (19f) tell my best friends (20f) parents about her severe depression/suicidal thoughts?? So I’m at a loss of what to do now, my best friend is severely depressed and very suicidal. She appears to be okay when we hang out for the most part but I know that she’s not and if I am unable to hang out with her for whatever reason one day she either isolates herself and refuses to talk to me, or she spams me with messages about wanting to hurt herself or how worthless she is. I of course talk to her and talk her down when this happens and of course want to continue to be there for her but what I’m doing isn’t working. She refuses to get help and refuses to talk to her parents (she still lives with them)

Like I do what I can to help her and be there for her like I drop what I’m doing so I can be there for her all the time and I try to be as helpful and listen to her but she doesn’t really talk to me. The most she gives me is vague or like she just messages me how she thinks she’s a shitty person and like that, but in person refuses to talk to me. It’s been bad for months and 
I’m struggling to continue helping her and I feel selfish but I am drained and stressed and I’m just struggling to continue to be there for her as I’m trying to navigate my own stuff at the moment. That’s why I figured I’d talk to her parents. I mean I have no idea what I’m doing and they could potentially do more for her than I can. 

Her parents do love her and I know that, however, they have a difficult relationship and she’s never been able to talk to them very well and they’re not always the most understanding. I’m at a loss what to do so I was thinking about going and talking to them and letting them know how bad she is by showing screenshots of messages she’s sent me (about her self harm, starving, wanting to kill herself) and telling them how concerned I am and then maybe giving them a few options on how to help her like professionally because I know she needs it. 

I’m just worried that 1: she’s going to hate me after I do this (though it’s the least of my worries and I’d rather she get better and hate me than hurt herself). 2: that her parents aren’t going to actually take into consideration what I say and just brush off the issues. Or 3: that they do try to help and then actually make things worse and actually push her to kill herself. 

Like I think I want to talk to her parents but then it’s like what do I say to them to get them to understand?? Like I’ve never had a conversation or said more than “hello” or “thank you” to them. I just want this to help her and not make things worse.",2.9707664233576665,3.9494962591240887,4.287671532846719,88.72329562043802,73.63503649635038,7.3778102189781025,26.291240875912408,7.734863291789972,1.2338334306569347,2042,69,458,26,40,675,196,548,0.18899999999999997,0.6779999999999999,0.133,-0.9925,8,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,1,1,12,6,29,35,4,3,13,1,39,1,0,8,3,101,86,57,3,10,23,6,1,8,2,1,0,4,0,3,25,35,0,4,16,1,0,8,9,18,1,1,7,6,97,17,77,70,13,36,0,6,0,1,107,10,0,12,25,339,122,2,0.05960585492500355,0.0,0.17450014847658255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04959684622308537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995367982483089,0.03633517592073874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510533470955604,0.052716534862743664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047590424985057216,0.0,0.0,0.03844084535728106,0.0,0.051338435505590745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030138511205632417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921026713126833,0.0,0.09342479717213116,0.11435873477682898,0.1016261429140359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05270926065882177,0.0,0.0,0.11769688300036082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.279667836831126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12761860098966088,0.0672877549607317,0.0,0.062213026454419874,0.0,0.0,0.1318900942647839,0.0,0.1310312761560292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06095102508104235,0.0,0.2329632792666317,0.0,0.05263306192866343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05379661123776583,0.0,0.07957474201897753,0.0,0.059882092843595726,0.06492825006847157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047576824728111096,0.0,0.0,0.04419698616384478,0.09194341980512097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04039046990883262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3971114881011785,0.06454733233561946,0.0,0.0,0.10409106683102257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03818503696010233,0.06128474620402277,0.0,0.06399438132096448,0.0,0.0,0.05669881763711258,0.09480193648040053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621819062407057,0.13467529986636995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0476013127391295,0.0,0.0682783054294295,0.12462596277243145,0.06823444331328081,0.13039826173244864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044816184863430315,0.47908928359062297,0.10419628887771308,0.054877062915774655,0.0,0.0,0.07919896290883406,0.11457907517102214,0.05856244982836058,0.04732039077184858,0.034756653344357395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214053885890033,0.0,0.0,0.12410359418061075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836214548649706,0.17578538784608294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05359282195298008,0.0,0.05378501297215521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043393772287708486,0.12106527802678448,0.1214869168784558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aprilmay2000,2020/01/28,Where to start to get help. My ds called me tonight and said he feel like he needs to leave school and be in an inpatient treatment center for depression.  He was at the least thinking of cutting and suicide.  I have him in therapy at school (out of state).  I don't know what to do.,2.2836842105263138,4.091671754385967,2.9331929824561414,94.33768421052632,77.0701754385965,6.665263157894738,25.43508771929825,7.554174236665415,1.0587992982456145,218,8,49,3,5,68,44,57,0.17,0.7490000000000001,0.081,-0.6908,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,12,3,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,5,1,12,9,1,10,0,1,0,0,7,7,0,0,3,30,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738624388386519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23100047979941524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561010343182311,0.19160231009218134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140123559534488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976897218909876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473958417445162,0.0,0.0,0.2839853365832641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310290933982023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19886708484570872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551198521974096,0.0,0.0,0.5428659371152098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18983351529170492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933675396275474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3067103564021329,0.0,0.0,0.17185188886792266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InsertValidUnsername,2020/01/28,"Something that might help Here’s a little tip for anybody suffering from mental illness. I want you to picture your illness as a being. It can be a human, a creature, whatever you see it as but give it a physical form.
Now, beat the ever loving shit out of it! Beat it until it can no longer hold itself up, until it bleeds and breaks and is begging you to stop. It will feel very cathartic being in control like that even if only for a moment.
If you can’t bring yourself to do that then maybe try talking to it. Maybe it’s a nice, misunderstood being. Maybe it’s an asshole. If that’s the case kick it in the knee caps. If it doesn’t have knee caps laugh at it for looking weird. Stubby bitch probably walks like a stick figure! How you gonna chase me without any damn knees! Try me bitch! Come at me!",1.7021341463414643,3.792306347560977,3.085548780487805,91.19710365853659,80.03658536585365,5.319512195121952,21.835365853658534,6.322622252153567,0.3392878048780492,627,19,130,5,16,204,104,164,0.174,0.687,0.139,-0.7671,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,6,0,3,5,11,4,0,12,0,13,8,4,2,1,19,22,13,0,5,6,0,1,2,0,3,3,0,0,1,19,4,0,3,2,0,0,3,4,6,0,0,0,3,10,5,20,15,1,18,0,1,2,1,11,7,4,5,9,89,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581449367671566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15937144242095785,0.0,0.0,0.20750667231615488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219867076139496,0.1673539319638689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935476182661564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748035384548347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400963321217205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18077502045617008,0.1854306126924362,0.0,0.0,0.15536347037955078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669805392093433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5576082166856671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18644856492306253,0.1962684781743073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070995104343922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994742109959765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14743059792986946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18991214322266145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243126440615758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467830318942594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14870562487627534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25122198571100346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265426309597105,0.10912486185396203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17834495072753856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheGhostInTown,2020/01/28,"I need help now more than ever. My name is Lynn.  I am an 18 year old male.  The only things I enjoy in life are Mathematics, Sciences, and Linguistics.  About 4 months ago my parents were making a road trip out here to to Victoria, BC.  I had a week off of work and it was gonna awesome.  I had a few local places for us to visit.

Before they got here an RCMP officer knocked on my door.  He told me parents were T Boned by a semi truck.  I never even got to say good bye.  I also lost my best friend.  My girlfriend from cancer summer of 2018.  This account is a throwaway.  

With that in mind I deeply miss the 3 most important people in my life.  I don't know how to move forward and I don't know if I can.  This emotional destress is causing me to consider suicide and I need someone to talk to.  Someone who actually understands how Selective Mutiam works.


If it matters..  28M Victoria, BC.",0.7013809523809513,3.0254487888888875,3.0273015873015865,88.62500000000004,86.11111111111109,6.095238095238094,23.015873015873016,7.447530270364453,1.1600873015873026,682,26,141,12,21,233,125,180,0.07200000000000001,0.795,0.132,0.872,2,0,0,0,0,1,24.0,1,0,1,4,9,6,0,0,9,0,13,4,1,4,2,23,25,9,1,4,2,2,0,0,2,1,3,1,1,1,7,6,0,0,3,0,1,4,3,2,0,0,9,1,22,4,22,15,4,22,0,2,0,0,16,10,0,3,11,92,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.1486421486728134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502230885923544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181008597015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961292766249904,0.0,0.15985022870185786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15647438909144626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17133926901368893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060578881189576,0.1377819761139042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768189667982155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12775861826846888,0.2436481113599369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10209674861312712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742195294280818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151759533409944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16627505083470376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167464672993903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15379957264463154,0.0,0.12158020809189125,0.16189183760085898,0.0,0.2258863976544332,0.11747841702834184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983400313883514,0.0,0.0,0.11584606878457696,0.0,0.0,0.33826621564129433,0.0,0.0,0.10559936781734898,0.0,0.15914176738768085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113081558794225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581201380066451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16661313451299584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242888239476593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119450432164552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554809276742578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585702796651235,0.1832219601576324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218175270374587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22178125147197916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808895473652114
mentalhealth,TarotClubsAdorer,2020/01/28,"What does this mean? Some times when im attempting to sleep my face randomly smiles on it's on, i don't have any thoughts im blank trying to sleep when it does this. When it first happend I didn't think anything of it thinking it could just be a twitch, but it's been happening more frequently and it's not just a twitch of my facial muscles but a full blown smile. 

What does this mean?",1.4839814814814822,3.5623567037037063,2.198256172839507,97.3359027777778,80.72839506172839,6.025308641975308,21.23611111111111,7.1686216300943375,0.34827037037037023,307,9,71,4,8,95,50,81,0.0,0.922,0.078,0.6868,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,3,0,6,6,4,0,0,14,12,6,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,12,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,4,0,6,7,3,9,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,6,44,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316859381120199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935417971974844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546105946719674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5083828270340435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471521082505458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17124054130088098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4183418758950644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42187458326957933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3875717497671617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481611088045283,0.0,0.15373331420432976,0.11291655504370485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13147294042180965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MS55BW26GR1419,2020/01/28,"Canada’s MH system makes me sad (LR) I am very lucky to not suffer from mental health problems. But I do work security at a hospital with an emergency department. We only have to deal with the patients who have mental health problems. We also have to deal with them very harshly imo. As a guard, my job is to follow orders, not question because I’m just security and I’m not paid to think. Don’t get my wrong, I love my job, but just seeing how poorly mental health patients are treated is saddening. 

I used to wonder how it was perfectly legal for any doctor to sign a form that involuntarily admits a patient into a hospital and legalizes physical force to be used to keep that patient in a hospital. I get it, the hospital has to cover their ass, and some patients are so unstable that they really don’t understand what they are doing or where they are walking or why they are doing what they are doing. Their minds are in another universe. However, others have more minor cases but the symptoms are still there. The suicide ideation cases usually break my heart. These are normal every day people that get stuffed in a room with a mattress on a floor and a locked door with no one to talk to. If they maintain their behaviour the door stays locked. Furthermore they get injected with sedatives.

I don’t care how mentally unwell someone is, your condition is only going to get worse if you’re stuffed in a room for long periods of time with no one to talk to. It will also deteriorate if sedatives are continuously given. The hospital I work at has a psych nurse that only works during the day and is gone by 8pm. Some days the biggest hospital in our city takes our psych nurse away and then we don’t have one, and paramedics continue to send psych patients our way. Then they are forced to stay at the hospital when I’m sure a few of them would at least go to the other hospital where the psych nurse is. If they try to leave the aggression code gets called and the patient either gets stuffed in a room or strapped to a bed. 

When they finally speak to psych, the services that psych refers them to are unhelpful and usually cost too much money. Sometimes there isn’t a care plan even made and they’re stuck at the hospital for 3 days with no referral to a psych ward, mental health unit, or any types of services that are more beneficial than a psych ward. I see the same patients quite often coming to the hospital. I’ve read news stories of patients that I had to deal with who successfully took their life, and it’s heartbreaking to read. I’m sure many hoped that one day things would get better. 

The impression I get is that many of these mental health patients are being treated more like prisoners than patients. Inmates in prison have more rights than mental health patients. I’ve even seen people voluntarily bring themselves into the hospital with no intention to leave, but because a doctor/psych nurse/ psychiatrist heard about certain details of a plan or something along those lines, they place them under a mental health form for involuntary assessment. These patients are treated like animals, not humans. 

All hospitals do is preserve a mental health patient’s life. They don’t take the mental pain and suffering away. Maybe it keeps someone who’s determined to kill themselves from doing so, but that’s only temporarily. They end up back at the hospital months later. 

I just wish more could be done to help people who suffer from mental illnesses.",6.890030769230767,7.589432210769234,6.7955000000000005,75.28525,64.58461538461539,10.007692307692311,32.71153846153846,9.948597397169383,3.213861538461538,2787,107,489,57,40,884,284,650,0.126,0.7659999999999999,0.10800000000000001,-0.9356,3,1,1,0,0,1,55.0,6,1,21,9,23,30,2,0,44,0,54,17,2,8,5,89,98,38,2,12,22,0,0,2,0,3,14,2,7,1,29,29,0,5,6,2,4,10,14,11,0,4,11,5,44,19,79,80,15,67,0,5,3,2,46,29,1,16,24,327,73,22,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191706053496894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965916642071045,0.05370590174929053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624085242991463,0.03938301336150488,0.0,0.06244329415479676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045297621517460016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05229868417695622,0.0,0.10443909020144912,0.0,0.0,0.044119248529649935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04089292030367716,0.0,0.0,0.16515490522461687,0.15840864811768332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048463429542886,0.0,0.05241317481301282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045363407615949695,0.0,0.0,0.06765720938980317,0.0,0.04315286215828505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05610614998309371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408307628906481,0.0,0.058216048911220265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4355335454430935,0.0,0.060692856699172966,0.034329938567708336,0.0,0.0,0.05087042724714478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016507181399922,0.09104874347888102,0.05666445629880092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846364687203372,0.0,0.0,0.07235271798356396,0.050044461757406386,0.0,0.0,0.04532578063360677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04622569637998823,0.048463135155899915,0.03418800719461368,0.10385279418829856,0.05145475483859272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5677659368433357,0.0,0.051714965974451486,0.0,0.040881234040661386,0.0,0.037650676626622664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05018217015512777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882492266278945,0.15581253972170855,0.05449891670078874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652307323797518,0.0,0.05351127408256333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980162551001455,0.0,0.0,0.057375201236312685,0.05447600138333383,0.10246250528149688,0.0,0.03281117312343232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043739373336782315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162726134788924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679266089495415,0.03942965099185918,0.05065531079493429,0.0,0.0,0.10918185140036532,0.04090227580028606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05602351446154717,0.0,0.09654357257202696,0.05323448158327685,0.07701821013409953,0.08233320000133879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03402655974790872,0.03281803703797435,0.0,0.0,0.029865273438503887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569044075852765,0.03477324750070275,0.0,0.0,0.053319111857280964,0.0,0.0884707651758096,0.11281744377134882,0.08451942544200809,0.0,0.04065398218275836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046215730363685065,0.0,0.0588974737046043,0.0,0.055543077364414606,0.11186061518011327,0.0,0.05219489856846224,0.07276673224790788,0.05599817844351497,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aidan_cs,2020/01/28,"Doubting reality and my own existence So I am currently a sophomore in highschool and I am dealing with a few issues that I feel like are holding me back a lot. 
For some background information I am very fortunate to be living comfortably in the middle class and have two great parents who take really good care of me. I wouldn’t consider myself extremely popular but I have a good amount of friends and people that I talk to everyday. I do not frequently use drugs but occasionally will smoke some weed, drink, or vape, although I try my best to keep from turning these into habits. 

My main issues are:
1. I feel like I am always tired especially during the week no matter how much sleep I get, I usually drink a cup or two of coffee in the morning but it doesn’t help that much.

2. I usually am pretty distracted in class and pay more attention to my thoughts and friends than what the teacher is saying.

3. I don’t really have any long term goals or aspirations and I don’t have any idea what to study in college. (Although I am interested in film, politics, video games, and history)

4. Being raised in a Catholic family I have began to question the Catholic Church a lot and don’t really consider myself religious anymore, this really scares me as I feel like the human race truly doesn’t know why we are here and religion and philosophy are all just theories of reasons why we MIGHT be here. 

5. I usually have a negative mindset and find it hard to see the positive side of some things, I guess I have more of a “doomer”mindset and think pretty nihilistically. 

6. I procrastinate a lot because of how I view a lot of schoolwork as busywork and don’t see much point in doing it. 

7. I feel like a lot of my days I’m just doing the same thing over and over again and I feel like I’m wasting some of the best years of my life not enjoying it. Most people I see in school seen so ignorant and carefree of the issues plaguing our world today and I don’t know how they can be so effortlessly happy. This summer I volunteered at a physical therapy clinic and I just can’t imagine myself doing the same job everyday for years.

8. I feel like the mental health of my generation is really terrible and on social media I’ve been seeing a lot of videos from people my age who experience similar thoughts and problems.

9. I have always been kinda paranoid but recently I have been doing a lot of research into psychedelics such as LSD and I have really been doubting existence and everything I know for the past few months and it’s kind of really scary.

Any and all feedback is greatly appreciated, again I am super fortunate to have the family and opportunities that I do and I do not think I am suffering from depression or anything that severe, but these problems I have do impact me a lot. Thank you for taking the time to read this.",4.744357923497269,6.1519344353369805,6.119398451730423,75.63527254098364,69.85610200364299,9.861584699453553,30.118442622950816,10.125756701596842,3.1889456830601093,2251,90,415,60,40,761,255,549,0.106,0.705,0.18899999999999997,0.9946,3,0,4,0,0,0,40.0,3,1,1,5,15,34,0,4,31,0,55,8,1,5,2,100,85,47,0,3,15,1,7,6,2,3,5,1,0,1,21,32,2,3,20,7,1,0,14,10,0,2,8,14,60,24,52,70,30,43,1,2,6,0,19,19,0,23,30,307,81,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631391087018596,0.0,0.0,0.13033078965712847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633561787667454,0.0,0.0,0.05257143467201902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04912317592664663,0.0,0.038943349713352365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408551567847168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513442425661893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04120016612252191,0.06586203226214038,0.055023557667419655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516482185021055,0.07408564568624612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057415197751434374,0.062491221596358885,0.12044909194359205,0.0,0.1938112947543207,0.2738342561294018,0.0,0.0,0.05838920286864405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871388943562458,0.0,0.033376972919298364,0.0,0.0,0.10716644168740913,0.0,0.14086559801403525,0.07037589144805474,0.0,0.0,0.06800615342651614,0.05722789248659215,0.0,0.0,0.06790615149979125,0.0,0.0,0.04282038035872805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721177345770467,0.0,0.20003621156745371,0.06339542970500114,0.056783408150593184,0.0,0.0665257930322029,0.10532762016610904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04512345540516369,0.18726420524232915,0.0,0.0564111136173852,0.056535701715847035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.434497997467239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438046997272223,0.06777127445795589,0.0,0.0,0.050991934858919785,0.0,0.14088719885726345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093608862684865,0.0,0.06098490793096356,0.1328682398902187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06039142653397304,0.0,0.0,0.1299868447918613,0.0,0.12225752505931504,0.0,0.0,0.07156517146839382,0.0,0.06390170841710831,0.0,0.2864819688719486,0.06568382409165943,0.06307815805694834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05080345522356553,0.06395944953330006,0.06465444405672653,0.20363044761435725,0.0,0.0,0.07217121105849887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393055695005215,0.06512212142842701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606626723162053,0.05134787720716711,0.0,0.05881619114855801,0.07305740229345756,0.0,0.08488394046093392,0.08186911408660262,0.0,0.10143418765443668,0.03725151927178419,0.07342574345544467,0.06055496071640596,0.0,0.0,0.043373327958380864,0.06948790450649231,0.1248115918949145,0.0,0.0,0.05517562765200088,0.21107899059565896,0.05271133733592254,0.0,0.0,0.051244228584550224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529150562424186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227894439074923
mentalhealth,melonhead267,2020/01/28,"Scream and shout yet don't speak up In the day time I suppress it as much as possible though sometimes it slips through. Sulking, my constant sour expression and my speach all indicate something is there while I'm going mental in my head with all of the ""cheer up"" and ""smile"" from my parents all the while throwing around ""he's"" ""hims"" and ""sons"" at me (I'm trans mtf and I'm out to them, they don't care). So tonight after a shitty day of staying home, going 30 minutes to eat below average pizza, being forced to be seen in public and be around my parents, being out of the house for two and a half hours (homebody kind of person), then having an enormous migrane and having to sit in a dirty bathtub to stop my hands from shaking, I lost it. When my parents went to sleep I went apeshit. I lashed in my bed loudly, screamed at the top of my lungs into my blankets and pillows, begging to be killed, maimed and torn apart. I kept screaming over and over ""please help me"" and ""I'm begging, please"" and ""I just want to be happy again"". It was like a demon took control and tried to push all of my anger and resentment out at once. Once I regained rationality, I realized I was a slobbering mess with snot and saliva running down my face, soaking the better of a section of bed I sleep one. This kind of thing happens often in smaller bursts, mainly crying fits and a general sense of dread, but this has only happened around one other time. I feel like I'm slipping away and losing myself. This feeling of wanting to feel human again, to feel like a person deserving love is insatiable. I never want to live without it again but my parents hold the key to my mental imprisonment and I can't do anything about it. I've wanted to talk about hormone blockers to my doctor but my parents insist on being in the room. I feel hopeless, as if I'll stay this way forever, and despite all of my thinking, I feel like I'm getting closer and closer to suicide daily and it scares the hell out of me.",5.799570763087843,5.8176158137755145,6.138078970718722,81.4118899733807,66.88265306122449,8.143921916592722,32.34960070984916,7.423996415210882,2.1073736468500446,1557,60,299,13,23,501,208,392,0.138,0.777,0.084,-0.9654,5,0,1,0,0,2,53.0,0,0,2,5,16,25,4,3,18,0,18,10,6,1,6,64,48,35,2,5,6,6,7,4,0,0,1,6,5,3,13,32,2,6,8,0,0,9,5,14,0,4,8,15,39,11,68,33,8,65,2,3,1,1,19,34,1,2,22,208,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07007051430244554,0.22740245026388198,0.0,0.0,0.08000045109067565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753075240552441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681525689623512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201600635059924,0.09550203804126932,0.0,0.0,0.09353236838109208,0.10982834490107064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715378677323098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712886162164242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583238822714929,0.18249175888315053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04448692855549597,0.0,0.09678447470124073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15059426517062854,0.0906428781344117,0.0,0.0,0.08738761716368526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05707369587840809,0.0,0.08541156328397287,0.0,0.08385478353373757,0.09825071343987113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942049441636678,0.17733952140459933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663983397527822,0.0,0.07518827987488255,0.0,0.0,0.09526014441233753,0.09295038101033663,0.0,0.07685045319133507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17162067842226328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625944396365867,0.0,0.06567229159431127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18136218082030114,0.11539856677536252,0.06475978313054702,0.0,0.0,0.4727404001523941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869794723274185,0.0,0.18693644454976066,0.0,0.09599289880051254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852491766918623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17042133367976034,0.0,0.0,0.06555199348413418,0.08421470947972379,0.0,0.0,0.18151537818734775,0.0,0.07118852146040368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313937512913482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06843967996483136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656932706157947,0.05456015196582725,0.08365863026972405,0.0,0.09930233520184556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094603864386695,0.05781069921361661,0.0,0.08317836948473491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008927537934208,0.06758745025915901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786827312058396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208076433754118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fellowredditor1010,2020/01/28,Unknowingly dumbing myself down? I don't want to boast or brag or whatever but I spend a lot of my time studying and learning just for personal study and my family/friends say I'm a intelligent fellow and I know this but I think I'm subconsciously dumbing myself down and I was wondering if anyone had any thoughts or could recommend me to another subreddit? Anything and everything is appreciated.,4.166198630136987,7.214719095890416,5.91121575342466,68.93476883561647,77.21917808219176,10.225342465753425,33.78253424657534,10.125756701596842,4.700289041095892,326,18,52,12,8,111,53,73,0.057,0.7759999999999999,0.16699999999999998,0.899,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,21,12,11,0,3,7,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,5,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,3,1,10,0,6,8,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,7,1,37,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21403565882188505,0.3300349014832667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22007523900543716,0.0,0.2590062183657269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25129623531487305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828702191426857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24316923593966355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17297421916726158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26758277549768056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748209669566725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502958288937807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016742530693127,0.0,0.2498703480443381,0.18352885355244333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185643251569851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34132476076121737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rebrandingjosh,2020/01/28,"Overcoming inadequate thoughts So I’m doing something different in 2020. I’m stepping out. I grew up with a very emotionally distant and wounded father who is well known. I had a really tough and somewhat lonely childhood. Being the only boy with 3 older sisters, i always longed for homies/ bro’s i was the greatest at sports lost interest with it just hard to connect with guys i inherently felt different like i was less than now I’m 30 and i still feel less than amongst other men I’m joining  and organization and i literally feel like I’m inadequate 

How do i heal ? How do i connect? I’m tired of the feeling of anxiety dealing with other men",2.1452099999999987,4.966281936000005,4.2600750000000005,78.43491250000002,85.64,6.9650000000000025,29.4125,8.07648339933343,2.70981,522,27,91,12,16,178,81,125,0.145,0.7290000000000001,0.127,0.1179,3,2,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,0,5,0,8,3,0,2,0,21,20,8,0,0,1,3,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,4,4,11,0,0,6,1,0,2,0,3,1,0,6,5,10,4,15,13,4,11,0,2,0,0,9,4,0,1,7,58,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17708859269990532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16281159391559946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194146468734416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4447165270112385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23940102559873444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3228342289025339,0.15204320442503275,0.2043466950952815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21073157121104574,0.0,0.0,0.1906506281385256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20795243255245632,0.0,0.0,0.1883446441244338,0.0,0.0,0.2323251285619148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16186404808575153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634202519737812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384414080021545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16996341754724015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16896036836906253,0.0,0.2446126093949465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756040478944742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19135647004208706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lizzwaddup,2020/01/28,What made you seek help? I dont remember being ever happy. How do you guys get out of it? What made take a step foward and get help?,-1.4012068965517237,0.5962936206896536,1.0719827586206918,100.29004310344831,95.55172413793105,4.279310344827587,10.698275862068963,5.985473137389443,-1.3672827586206897,101,1,25,1,4,34,23,29,0.0,0.705,0.295,0.8638,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,1,7,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,3,1,2,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3298539136630056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.254585021716247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29408899454090165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786768852917648,0.0,0.29960567922315423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3772961267639735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5326241160932141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188247077518339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21161319817524324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uwruby,2020/01/28,thinking of drugs i want to do drugs i know it wont help me in the long run but i dont care i just want to feel bliss again even if its just for a short while. absolute peace,-1.8214634146341453,-0.04852387804877978,0.2714146341463426,107.72175609756098,92.65853658536585,4.255609756097561,13.078048780487805,5.6839178017228535,-1.5098136585365856,135,2,39,1,5,44,32,41,0.11199999999999999,0.616,0.273,0.8089,0,0,2,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,9,9,3,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,5,8,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,3,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29654266310269056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.340875992572675,0.0,0.6745911987469282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19210478578326606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706334410662109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949517443590052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15984447209906122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573945765014259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18636600687102908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34310370283842145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notreallyvibing,2020/01/28,"Trigger warning for self harm, i need some advice So lately life's been kinda sucky, and I've taken to using half of a dull broken scissor to sort of cut up my arm. I've never gotten to the point where there's blood, but it scabs over the next day. Is this technically self harm even though I'm not fully cutting? Writing this out is kind of making it obvious that it is, but idk. life's just being weird atm. it's nice to have a distraction.",2.9575155279503065,4.1891654347826135,4.285714285714288,87.745,74.0,6.561490683229812,21.838509316770182,6.868970318607317,0.4866161490683232,348,8,73,3,7,115,68,92,0.23399999999999999,0.7090000000000001,0.057,-0.927,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,2,1,4,0,6,5,2,3,2,16,12,5,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,7,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,7,0,1,3,0,2,2,11,8,1,9,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,3,4,43,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455362500709813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204711834986885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16596019056019426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261657028875795,0.0,0.0,0.2834413275818477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3549561376354958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167723387945306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18631209020078227,0.1937934258751944,0.0,0.26722644316531097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375295432976063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5242547933665314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468696031523961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21701493721076268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustAFilmDork,2020/01/28,A way to talk to people anonymously online? So I don't have any immediate life threatening shit going on or anything serious.  Just dealing with some fairly mediocre/pathetic shit I'd feel better talking about but don't feel comfortable going to anyone I know about,7.96125,9.054314291666667,8.349999999999998,63.69500000000001,62.33333333333334,11.4,36.83333333333333,11.20814326018867,4.8091583333333325,218,10,31,6,3,72,38,48,0.237,0.722,0.04,-0.8202,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,2,0,1,0,3,3,2,0,0,8,8,3,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,2,2,2,7,8,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,2,0,18,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17859401646771236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18363351730928465,0.0,0.21611801081492868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23227048438616524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.270754859355178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265582197867767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985116972299704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433184038812552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18549981532938048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18207111830916295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.539161609174819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4221760791127362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20845951326994305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tyjones8164,2020/01/28,Is it’s okay to be vulnerable I’ve been talking to this girl for a little over a month now and it’s been so great we’re taking things slow . The thing is she lives in a different state and I honestly think I Love her . I’m scared for myself I don’t think I can handle being emotionally attached to someone and then they  just up and leave me . Please can someone ways I can protect myself but also not push her away .,1.1605747126436758,3.3061570114942533,2.9639080459770137,91.03022988505751,82.33333333333334,5.705747126436782,20.011494252873558,6.937597516519254,0.3040252873563216,328,9,71,4,9,109,63,87,0.055,0.789,0.156,0.7976,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,1,4,1,10,1,0,0,0,9,15,8,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,12,4,9,11,0,12,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,4,51,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17981054787332065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112517257114115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349178900548493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529232911067432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478952774533332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23808114745613115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253563690308065,0.19854455394055684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202933741460688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17947121253089424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468151489841743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22511167682318195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810252908243213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905741575679722,0.18072398721002306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29875751451818444,0.28814653169377585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784735624490207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Honest_Mat3,2020/01/28,"Confused Kobe Bryant's death is so unsettling for me. I just can't believe it, I think it's a big joke right now and soon he will come back out of hiding. He was my Hero and literally the only celebrity I cared about. He was always my favorite basketball player. I remember as a teen shouting KOBE everytime I threw something in the trash can. I really don't give any shit about any celebrity. But Kobe is different, the word KOBE is special and it holds a lot meaning and memories for me. My brother is also in a similar state as me. It feels like we lost an older brother. I just can't accept this yet, I just can't. I wish he comes back soon.",1.7019230769230766,3.824726045454547,3.4775757575757567,88.21520979020978,80.21212121212122,6.78881118881119,24.547785547785548,7.882392219407189,1.4077988344988346,506,19,105,9,13,169,82,132,0.11199999999999999,0.741,0.146,0.679,1,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,2,13,9,1,1,8,0,12,1,1,0,0,23,22,9,1,1,4,2,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,8,0,1,5,1,0,3,4,3,0,0,4,2,16,6,10,17,1,16,0,1,0,0,8,5,1,3,8,68,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559412280931693,0.17229915955473438,0.0,0.0,0.2816299433532926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31844870939440284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332974296273334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111220717145897,0.0,0.0,0.3567456259568725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21634449366816186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470101521383328,0.1479311340106201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19864079462999215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011641371414263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260418007979626,0.17604384783481494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255603686540483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15748636895298454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265459957269865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345703954556613,0.17683698884292345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21255478830337232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594129092531875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13268235017556948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23812073895486874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZanyzanyZanyzany,2020/01/28,"I’m so tired of the running around and misinformation, the random diagnoses and worst of all, the unknowing. What is wrong with me?

I don’t know and I never will. I lock up when I talk about it. Hell, this post I wanted to rant about every internal issue but *I Can’t*. 

I can scratch the surface, sometimes, but it feels like whoever I am, or I’m supposed to be is chained up deep away and even I’m not aware of it. I’m a chameleon. Every aspect of me is fake. 

Yes. I’ve been to psych teams. Yes I’ve tried opening up to family, friends, therapists. No it doesn’t work. 

Yes I keep a healthy diet and routine. Yes I have tried medication. Yes I’ve gone soul searching from vacations to camping to psychedelic use. 

I feel like a husky of a person, and everything I actively do I despise for some reason. Yes I hate every aspect of myself, but I also feel like I’m superior in every way possible. 

The closest I got to a diagnoses I was suddenly ghosted by my therapist, and my psychologist simply stone walked me. No I can’t “just switch” because it’s like no one wants to deal with me. 

Why can’t I just have help? Why can’t I just accept that I’m a medics mystery, or simply an unwanted part of society??? I don’t understand, yet I completely do at the same time. 

This sounds like an edgy teen rant now, and being an adult it just makes me feel sick that I even type this sort of thing out. 

I just want to find a true love, but I am unloveable. I’m unloveable because ???? I don’t know. 


I just wish I stopped feeling this way?? Anyway??? I don’t even know what I want. I just wish I was normal. 

Sigh. Anyone else in the same boat?",0.1889609097370304,2.499695683582093,2.4556396588486145,91.66334577114431,89.17910447761194,5.817341862117982,21.110518834399432,7.2636822038024595,0.7583205401563609,1254,44,274,22,42,424,167,335,0.125,0.647,0.22699999999999998,0.9909,0,0,0,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,0,2,19,19,3,0,17,6,25,8,0,3,3,60,54,17,1,8,14,0,6,5,1,1,6,1,0,2,15,13,1,2,12,1,0,3,14,8,1,1,5,7,40,10,33,46,6,26,2,0,0,1,8,13,1,6,12,172,55,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049056454485436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037751613767848,0.10312883902772968,0.0,0.08960072503117647,0.0,0.0,0.09456492327449924,0.0,0.0,0.12271182500291118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553065356431107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376675654221904,0.0,0.2043172830032628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840809912857279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19943709932035375,0.0,0.33921121819198224,0.0,0.0904586245256386,0.0,0.09488480062151587,0.0,0.2544608371362641,0.2157152733733141,0.0,0.0,0.0919931862206999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776270926193479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804997955524582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937201997888903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746424049054925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505348910143712,0.0,0.0894632292205642,0.0,0.0,0.1659454642311514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458649610283249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084145289895916,0.0,0.06718532090353263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027905774044773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762825248119656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861660512459224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820371925609832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899521949820036,0.0,0.0,0.08788456677076599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346887406520215,0.09639583095377664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348598652639976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954640795097378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414873889020795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089945739768327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23372712634222506,0.06686804887143716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058690404749702926,0.11568351269130656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667083775276342,0.0,0.0,0.10478123571318182,0.0,0.08693014358927467,0.0,0.0,0.23746625912578045,0.15978415023765652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18164373592178912,0.0,0.2314873545407845,0.0,0.0,0.07327512329651599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100460628583692,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,treasure_horses_,2020/01/28,"Because it’s not sexual assault, all I can do is feel ashamed of myself. Something happened to me when I was in 6th grade, and I have come to terms that it’s not sexual assault. But it sucks because now I feel like a sucky person. Like why did I let myself give in. Why did I let myself do it even though I didn’t want to. And now all I can think is how stupid I am to have done it. All I can ever remember is his face and voice and my sisters laugh, I was so embarrassed and ashamed. It’s not like he touched me or made any physical contact, but it just sucks. And I don’t know what to do. If anyone has felt this way how do you cope? After 4 years I can’t even think of seeing him again even though he wants to, and I hate my stupid 6th grade self.",1.448850844277672,2.5408995792682947,3.0007317073170725,96.01818949343344,77.59756097560975,6.265666041275798,21.151969981238274,6.67199483983844,0.08014596622889325,577,14,143,5,13,190,87,164,0.152,0.77,0.078,-0.9328,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,0,14,14,7,3,1,0,24,1,1,3,4,32,40,17,0,3,8,1,4,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,10,8,0,0,7,0,0,1,6,10,0,0,8,6,24,4,11,30,4,12,0,0,1,0,10,2,2,2,11,101,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151134321027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465792963610702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999201530383278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125338897269046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678074494895497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3249197493126633,0.14832839364885428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658254190297832,0.11714663050192207,0.15744555552575934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730359891283804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500608832107334,0.0,0.0,0.16189531401261414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011857008434486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33535927522756304,0.0,0.2403355697841465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551608948282945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318013800301524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857562414221833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306700327205272,0.0,0.17106585969164734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623904563713353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101422442827783,0.3222170702441229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934381257256135,0.1301588977584419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959310847432688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559709986112703
mentalhealth,theperksofanxiety,2020/01/28,"Am I depressed/anxious? Or just severely introverted I’ve never really thought of my self as a depressed person: I have people who I call friends, I don’t struggle to do routine things, I don’t have negative thoughts about living. I’m generally a very productive person, there are things in life I enjoy very much, and I’ve never struggled with “living”.

But I just really REALLY don’t like social interaction with others. I do mostly everything alone (going out to eat, going out to movies, shopping, etc). And I really prefer it this way. 

I’m not sure if this is social anxiety either? Since I don’t necessarily panic/get uncomfortable when a person stops me in the middle of the street, I have to give a speech, I have to interact with the bank teller, etc. I’m not a very shy person; I don’t mind asserting myself at all. 

I don’t know how to describe it but this: I simply don’t like physically doing activities or speaking with people. This can be anybody: my family, friends, co workers. I dread every time somebody invites me to things, even if it’s a night out or if it’s for their birthday. It has now gotten to a point where I can go days and months without speaking to or seeing anybody in my life at all and I would be perfectly fine with it. 

I don’t think this is healthy and I feel like something is wrong. But I can’t quite figure it out. Not to be dramatic, but I feel like I am losing my personhood over this. Please let me know if you understand what I’m going through.",3.679348563006634,5.2324098338983065,5.332173913043482,79.6782166543847,72.6949152542373,8.249078850405306,27.06337509211496,8.841846274778883,2.1528437730287395,1171,42,223,23,23,398,148,295,0.09300000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.152,0.9726,0,1,1,0,0,0,39.0,0,1,1,4,9,16,0,3,10,0,30,3,0,1,6,55,49,20,0,6,19,0,2,4,2,1,2,3,0,5,19,14,1,1,10,1,2,4,16,6,0,0,3,6,33,10,32,41,7,28,0,2,1,0,18,14,0,9,13,162,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036570703670274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656415603302533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219718094318174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06454604355163156,0.0,0.08620239391766765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241114535414964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232407276230522,0.06610468483992044,0.0,0.08432527379244488,0.0,0.0899492454367506,0.0,0.09435049741335458,0.0,0.10121117986764687,0.14300037666106302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546496435891738,0.0,0.05228987527050265,0.0960099056980881,0.2275206796502373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100073421745261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234289810310797,0.1413848919502133,0.19558438205140544,0.0,0.17675240364399308,0.0,0.0,0.11196864407839237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105653360759373,0.0,0.07988627129312967,0.0,0.07357341914807848,0.0,0.15438224429950562,0.0,0.0,0.09392226263445932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174272703899966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13877159577591416,0.3495587295526732,0.0,0.10986242123710983,0.09461194004934216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645188990981612,0.0,0.0,0.25646606215235995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975416713774891,0.0,0.10440967130229477,0.11306668323381792,0.0,0.08279070283764017,0.0,0.0,0.2040465212394437,0.0,0.07704972391479507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367489122591124,0.0,0.20925951929539813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432819496625112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994745300855902,0.06412992835578263,0.0,0.1589113858060065,0.058359914815164976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041912049597846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477398949240649,0.0,0.07944219703758611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647761867766236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109695988737882,0.10942638548069007,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChunckyJava,2020/01/28,"Borderline Personality Disorder mixed with relationships: How do I know if my bf is being distant or passive aggressive, or if I’m just doing my weird overthinking, devaluing bullshit? I don’t know how to tell between me overthinking very simple things and him actually giving me some kind of clue as to what he’s feeling. I know it’s complicated but with the cyclical pattern BPD is known for and has me trapped in :( Just any advice would be nice. He’s 34 so he tends to text very matter of fact and uses a lot of periods, and I’m a bit younger so I tend to text a bit more millennial. Anything helps :)",2.645988700564974,5.1083580338983055,4.545000000000002,79.99145480225991,78.83050847457628,8.001129943502825,28.47740112994349,8.841846274778883,2.633285875706215,480,22,91,12,12,163,81,118,0.121,0.741,0.138,0.2698,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,4,0,9,0,0,3,1,26,19,14,0,3,7,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,10,2,13,16,5,2,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,6,1,57,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.19936612445658924,0.0,0.0,0.1996383889610544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389301660897417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16812047643785902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44608267752661,0.0,0.25730714304574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23414408461938485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032995942137796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959819915563708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13693715593025915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21274572569223016,0.33683177556151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368750444328146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17838580166684806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21934041722612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17856612568237942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13572702173002155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644853838370705,0.0,0.3371357544978204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512798123297582,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nopeonouttahere,2020/01/28,"I think I should get help, right? Tw: suicide



Hello. I need help, I think.


I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder last year. I have had depression for a long, long time but I never reached out to get help. It was really difficult for me to summon the courage to ask for help. Now I am on Lexapro and Wellbutrin, which I don’t think really help, except I do sleep better since the lexapro gives me fatigue. I was seeing a therapist weekly but she retired. I was supposed to go see a new one today but I didn’t go. I didn’t have the strength to get into my whole story all over again.


I never told the therapists or psychiatrists I saw that I was suicidal. I have two fears: one, they won’t believe me, and think I am just trying to get attention. Two: they believe me and I am put in a psychiatric hospital, which I have heard bad things about. My mother was committed a couple of times; I think she might have made up some of the stories about her time in the hospital (she was schizophrenic and paranoid), but it scared the shit out of me when I was younger.


Suicidal ideation has been with me for 20 years, since I was a teenager. It was usually just an idle thought a few times a week. But it’s all I think about these past few months. I thought it was sort of a coping mechanism; sort of like, hey, things are bad, but you’re not going to jump off the balcony, so you’re actually not bad off. Or, like maybe it is an escapism fantasy? I don’t know. I’ve thought about it often, but it didn’t feel like I was ever going to do it. Like how people say they want to do some adventurous thing but it’s all talk.


Well, last week I made a plan. I have been calmly making preparations. I can’t stop myself, it is all I have been doing. I skipped all of my obligations to tidy up my apartment and put finances in order. It’s like I’m watching myself do this, without emotion, like I’m in the back seat and this is going to happen, no matter what. That’s kind of comforting.


So I know I need help, right? This is serious, right? What will happen if I ask for help? I think I’m more afraid of going to the hospital and admitting that I need help than dying. That’s illogical, right? But this all feels very normal, and I’m not really upset. Am I so far gone that I can’t see how crazy I’m being? I need some outside perspective I think.


And before people even start, I know suicide is not an answer, long term answer to short term problem, I have so much to live for, blah blah. I’m suicidal, not stupid. I know the hotline numbers, I know how to use google.


The only reason I am thinking about getting help is because I think my death will cause problems. I know I should not do it. But I really, really want to. And I’m so tired. No one will have seen this coming, and I worry it will make some people sad and cause issues for them. It might cause a stir in my community and that worries me too because I am a very private person.


What would you do? Thanks for reading.",1.5195544554455438,3.6151366815181554,3.147679867986799,90.48449009900992,80.6996699669967,6.4162376237623775,21.98118811881188,7.554174236665415,0.8439675247524745,2303,72,493,36,60,760,247,606,0.166,0.693,0.141,-0.9751,0,0,0,0,0,2,87.0,0,1,4,3,24,32,2,4,27,0,64,6,2,12,10,113,131,35,7,13,23,1,2,8,0,10,4,2,0,1,35,19,0,2,26,2,1,11,19,17,1,5,29,10,77,15,56,91,18,63,0,4,6,0,30,21,1,12,36,334,112,2,0.0,0.0,0.053243279969008316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201360097535797,0.0,0.0,0.04195373738115372,0.1366674784049868,0.06651927672820339,0.0,0.0464270562337441,0.12294223597761415,0.0,0.04825442125746466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814631208097952,0.0,0.04699913003802862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603702716175346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398593818945193,0.05537786553221849,0.05662529392916198,0.0,0.06253118018147365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06137333691173695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03603676499594631,0.04935319083057337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061395849319492574,0.055174962450622464,0.038978107077779205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252832090143253,0.052339503883929744,0.18604829485524227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649552553568272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3291374106862318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05694709627728225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05681647404299973,0.17991048958354686,0.08894835028186047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993333369484894,0.0,0.04817801376719255,0.14485325537508284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325312724725907,0.07283925494791084,0.0,0.05481346111570067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11576035942142172,0.0,0.0,0.043549754332304166,0.0,0.04010832246168457,0.1618239889411051,0.08416100418359929,0.052694972249054686,0.0,0.0,0.05345780853738494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091503386038308,0.04149579865925576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05208427108560816,0.11347636095382435,0.04764021574142641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044142607323977,0.0,0.10969695542927818,0.0,0.0,0.05457536982424975,0.0,0.17476460317452064,0.05609738894419836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18637783405180086,0.0,0.04338878295832061,0.05462468372912472,0.0,0.1304332144786884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05600567692389048,0.0902661924562276,0.0,0.05460000796606624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038618277005279464,0.0,0.0,0.04561510880010365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984022313521625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04385374753957354,0.0,0.05023207458921291,0.0,0.12669813520968645,0.1087429246622801,0.3496023259108837,0.0,0.12994507755400958,0.12725891004369408,0.06270938920043845,0.05171707388821516,0.052134996172782166,0.0,0.037043069308665966,0.0,0.10659556613974068,0.0,0.0,0.047122844740514896,0.060090798087871176,0.09003642626457763,0.06436251683170835,0.0,0.13129567873703998,0.0,0.0490565363150048,0.0,0.0,0.06091496695479024,0.0,0.05259447617176816,0.0,0.0,0.11081788552238866,0.0,0.038758288336024925,0.0,0.0,0.07027048149579376
mentalhealth,JimJamminTrashCan,2020/01/28,"Feeling Lonely So I grew up without many friends. I was the weird kid at school and no one would talk to me. And I'm so not used to having friends that it feels so weird to have them now. Every time I'm with a group of people, I think to myself,""I do not belong."" And I just feel disconnected. Yet, every time I'm in my room by myself, I start overthinking about how nobody really wants to be my friend and how I'm meant to just be isolated. It breaks me every time and I hate it. Being locked in my room, with no one but myself is one of the most painful things I feel every day. I literally have daymares involving scenarios where people are angry at me or leaving me. The worst part is, none of these scenarios are made out of nowhere: even the most outlandish and stupid ones have happened before. I deal with this every day and it definitely makes me feel like I'm sinking every day.",3.3029130087789302,4.780392798882684,4.228830806065442,87.51671787709499,73.52513966480447,7.125458898643258,23.958898643256184,7.7094869923839395,1.0359557861133282,697,20,145,9,14,225,101,179,0.18,0.767,0.053,-0.9699,0,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,12,11,2,0,5,0,14,1,0,5,0,34,33,14,0,2,7,0,5,1,3,1,1,0,2,1,8,11,0,0,7,0,0,1,6,7,0,4,3,5,20,4,22,26,5,20,0,1,0,0,9,9,0,3,10,102,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179444068029443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23145008941134984,0.1233310015510888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901302891617203,0.0,0.6047494496943363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024370322953609,0.08546211908812165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772724079324525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578646210737516,0.0,0.0,0.11810767878405065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12666855969890314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844409693504385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319471003835364,0.07985248062748,0.1212838055874945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32425155360585994,0.0,0.12729240593918026,0.0,0.0,0.1295452419727944,0.0,0.16586969798491574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663662732048802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106971294945265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08467316747366545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615228844255592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947538994076704,0.07665265927578381,0.0,0.0,0.2092677840308504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332000373822166,0.0,0.0,0.07055957165013887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531692334365465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498015172505505,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whocaresanyways-5,2020/01/28,"Therapy; Helpful or not? I think my mental health is messing with all aspects of my life. I want to try therapy in hopes that it may help me, but I don’t know anybody who has ever gone. 

Opinions? Was it beneficial for you guys? Pros or cons? Anything is welcome. Just would like some knowledge as I don’t really know much about therapy.",1.4636363636363647,4.0431743787878816,3.182045454545456,86.94306818181818,85.51515151515152,6.330303030303031,26.431818181818183,7.645422480735847,1.801672727272728,263,12,51,5,8,87,54,66,0.0,0.738,0.262,0.9506,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,2,18,14,4,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,0,8,3,7,10,3,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,6,2,36,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869685970340054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18543349652136432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20298142008107492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21790454424587594,0.0,0.0,0.2748132609615604,0.0,0.0,0.2036104429771032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22532437844377295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14479698477525307,0.10015224540450593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065909591089765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069798626007375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313277252774685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7033032913340297,0.0,0.0,0.1313551983056322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13918098806154466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091382887472148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14562553716141996,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chicky429,2020/01/28,"Debating on seeing a therapist. I know there is something wrong with me. I absolutely hate saying that because it makes it more real. My mother, my aunt, and my grandmother were all schizophrenic. My mother also has bipolar depressive disorder. I had a horrific childhood, and growing up I learned to shove everything out of my mind and go blank. Then I got in high school and the depression got really bad. I met my husband four years ago and he made me feel something other than sadness or anger for the first time in a long time. Recently, I don't feel connected to him or anyone. The only person I truly deeply feel something for is my son, I imagine it's because he's my kid. I just want to stop feeling so disconnected.  I try so hard to push myself to remember what it was like to feel something other than negative emotions but I can't. My moods are out of control, I can get angry at the smallest things and obsess over them. I can cry or want to cry for weeks on end and then I'll have a week of extreme energy and I'll feel so happy, but then something just snaps and I'm back in the same horrible mood. I'm just so tired. It's affecting my marriage and I want it to stop. I don't realize how bad i'm getting until I'm in a good mood, and I see how messy the house is, how bad I've been doing as far as self care. Not to mention the intense anxiety I feel pretty much constantly. My husband offered to find me a therapist, but I have a hard time making myself go. I don't want to be medicated, my family has intense addiction issues. I just feel like nobody can help me with this. I've dropped ten pounds in the past month and a half it's getting out of hand.",2.571069875619376,4.305745536656893,4.394689048437659,84.4982404692082,76.03812316715542,7.753301648296088,26.71463241986045,8.53829466247534,1.95541088077662,1312,51,266,26,29,445,177,341,0.191,0.6809999999999999,0.127,-0.9769,0,0,5,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,2,15,18,2,1,16,0,21,6,1,8,1,60,53,32,0,4,11,6,11,2,0,0,5,1,0,3,13,17,0,3,14,0,0,4,6,10,0,4,8,14,41,5,38,44,4,42,0,3,2,0,19,15,0,3,24,174,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09885569458444468,0.0,0.0,0.08038325103149183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251757729097992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937073052546787,0.0,0.0,0.06340627618802748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972810539693293,0.2271445867141459,0.11055661374081764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245534137116827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799396538012406,0.1017064723923056,0.0,0.0,0.19921768032694148,0.0,0.0,0.15620685576507531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10392830280353188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020039398603249,0.08031646634995082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814982517859988,0.0,0.08548599331758418,0.0,0.3668083786744648,0.06478253734107693,0.0,0.0,0.08288080757944677,0.07713322754227027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14213126747073612,0.0,0.1030722244896158,0.07605893552314584,0.14505178784353953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653162981247446,0.16246476102881102,0.08952873147465791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607815748568187,0.09580947419557692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046337196456312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464742306975912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0498359159508027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860432978864048,0.0,0.0,0.08024984731888551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580457175781915,0.12106056726005862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091351585455812,0.0,0.0,0.09156197787521367,0.0,0.07238072337883178,0.0,0.06666098208353723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896700039272939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656529240255831,0.0,0.07917916714240188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225519566768367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032148510263198,0.058092582117750875,0.0,0.08953656538427192,0.0,0.10272391612726108,0.0,0.0,0.07211318514191521,0.0,0.09177403139201476,0.14452206158739506,0.0,0.0946000785150687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34905338945089576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516267828636879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105753021532817,0.06024443895693191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586304924089725,0.10422449041476108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615664587284386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21394405539990125,0.0,0.14547768560663427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09914545778161013,0.0,0.058395602464644925
mentalhealth,BlickyBloop,2020/01/28,"“Peaceful” places cause anxiety Not sure where to post this so I’ll post it here till someone can direct me to a better place? Or maybe this is where it’s supposed to be posted.

The woods. The dessert. The country. Mountains. But open fields.  Places with no light pollution where you can actually see stars. Places with little people or traffic so you can just hear the wind and wildlife. These places where it’s supposed to be peaceful because it’s void of all life except for nature. They all give me anxiety. It’s hard for me to sleep when it’s super quiet and when I know the nearest person is miles away. I grew up in the big city so that can be it. I’m used to overstimulation. Which sucks because it limits my ability to travel, camp, backpack, etc... 

I know for most people, even city people, they prefer nature because it’s peaceful. But for me it causes anxiety.",2.251588345864665,4.8974062202381,3.029849624060152,89.08883458646618,82.03571428571428,5.203508771929825,22.53258145363409,6.5966054737557815,0.6549476190476189,687,23,130,7,19,216,97,168,0.075,0.818,0.107,0.8604,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,2,3,12,4,1,0,7,0,9,3,1,3,3,23,17,12,0,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,15,5,1,1,3,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,5,12,3,19,14,4,25,0,0,1,0,7,17,1,3,3,86,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.11793736705833698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773619865985139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135475594717196,0.0,0.0,0.2210168596069496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068867168841181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483034270734032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478563797860246,0.07982380468287874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11593544358655801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826263596061483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362127387554187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328378558446592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853636926601625,0.0,0.12112878902496005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141542157250905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513576031011898,0.10552621126845313,0.6313404778622592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472379917110786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630604964937002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094260880678825,0.0,0.10240032767639254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139047168791191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438020047281174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Penguin729,2020/01/28,"I'm not entirely sure what's happening? I'm not looking for a diagnosis, just maybe advice, or some input?

So for about the last 2-3 years i've been pretty much emotionally numb. Occasionally stuff comes through, and under stress its a bit more emotions, but for the most part i'm numb.

Well about a week and a half ago I went through something really stressful that ended up being a false flag, but was still very stressful. Since then i've just been feeling off/weird. Last week I was irritable all week and since then (the weekend into today) i've been really anxious. I also developed like a new fear since then? I just don't feel right but I don't see why the stress of that situation would still be affecting me so i'm just not entirely sure whats wrong.",3.7328587196468033,5.406232390728484,4.7903476821192035,83.13046633554085,72.7748344370861,8.212141280353201,25.828366445916124,8.841846274778883,1.8425757174392936,605,20,122,12,12,198,92,151,0.254,0.6859999999999999,0.06,-0.9864,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,12,12,0,5,10,0,10,2,0,1,3,25,21,13,0,1,11,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,2,1,0,2,5,8,1,1,6,4,6,4,11,12,7,22,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,3,17,73,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344611876713415,0.10291069421158408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284066177708122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115364405261185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674503305202822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000505886931044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611811821154178,0.10282519309223533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306384931074079,0.11740164899907447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10266190782694083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892648863727482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05671786704128719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749006952204232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166324440744102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534275306127125,0.0,0.0,0.11212470949184478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12571893818824073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810975680826045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14874611010542615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09914399612930963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925122180055978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28810349946444,0.1304949866890366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937515257059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18542629965909047,0.0,0.5319430408214338,0.0,0.13290032989446302,0.0,0.0,0.21883522453993404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004393091009593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957900508124926,0.0,0.0,0.2793718111539433,0.0,0.10438282151471713,0.1076206858577287,0.10475715225753356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08247014154478298,0.12693101805789753,0.0,0.0747609969915989
mentalhealth,DuduMach,2020/01/28,"I have psychosomatics symptons and... it is horrible. Basically, this means that my (lots of) psychological problems, bleed thorugh my body

My eyes are constatly dry, my muscles are always rigid, I feel burning on my joints and a whole bundle of problems considering my ""man's health"". Feeling of constant full bladder, week stream of urine, low sex drive, pain to urinate... And every time I go see a doctor, I AM FINE. Nothing wrong with anything in my body. I Just feel pain for the sake of it, not as a signal that there is distress in me.

It is really frustating, bc most people just don't get how tis is a thing, even health professionals.

Only one therpaist has ever taken me seriously when I brought up those issues, but at the time I was so depressed I gave up on therapy (the salty price didn't help).",5.753684210526316,6.7004659473684205,6.4077368421052645,76.19515789473687,67.15789473684211,8.974736842105264,32.305263157894736,9.120678840339163,2.7897952631578944,632,26,116,11,10,207,109,152,0.149,0.82,0.032,-0.94,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,0,8,11,0,2,7,0,12,13,6,1,1,19,22,8,0,2,4,0,3,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,8,4,0,1,4,0,1,3,3,10,0,1,5,5,17,1,16,17,4,18,0,2,2,1,3,9,0,2,6,78,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162751059733616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017764124692566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514288816949671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17094817674636473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13624960008883452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16191510082124153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448360496855788,0.14309273585627158,0.13328266547418124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399582335495845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264822205640421,0.0,0.08990354039324171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33629908270714154,0.0,0.0,0.10603203331185257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16511021209066065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448825581248294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17231627764219107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517884458087313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719425549848034,0.1203113163863681,0.3366525657877783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966965979051824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30273467589765723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134114847782487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605767524640885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18090509352699752,0.0,0.1050950123188304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184484785013725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268912071027343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17661450312460064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17295692826292766,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gay_Pinecone,2020/01/28,"I dunno So I've felt like Shit since winter break ended and I've kinda done like- this weird thing

I've kinda made little fantasies in my head of different ways I could die/kill myself and imagine how people would react- I've fantasized about killing myself the most often and I know this isn't healthy. Does anyone know what this means??",3.695,6.008822439393942,3.8969696969696974,86.71545454545458,74.60606060606061,6.218181818181819,20.090909090909093,7.1686216300943375,0.5455636363636369,275,6,50,3,6,85,50,66,0.18100000000000002,0.7390000000000001,0.08,-0.7885,1,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,1,0,4,2,2,3,0,18,9,5,1,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,1,6,2,3,4,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,5,4,26,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16419082631854046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18748377470156025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24370493264923135,0.2453357593340333,0.0,0.0,0.205491591327698,0.2403012498266787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079798368520768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254629570235609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24099192436502306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25979230828754235,0.0,0.25810063962875285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22944129505817495,0.2353502149369072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22219130953293573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557866085756967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16279385050155393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24103821412010706,0.19424461072614754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600323513878386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18638830339510212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16680860077029952,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bubbles9130,2020/01/28,Failed to break up with boyfriend now my best friend hates me :) The only solution my brain can think of is just that I want to die. Why is it whenever I disappoint people I literally feel like the worst??,1.41,4.020190000000003,2.575000000000003,90.85000000000002,86.5,7.2,20.5,8.238735603445708,1.2393499999999995,160,5,34,4,5,51,34,40,0.284,0.444,0.272,-0.4137,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,2,2,7,1,0,2,0,3,1,1,0,0,5,7,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,6,3,5,7,2,3,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,22,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3571761244280612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3799429449405898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532293652584856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720910887365577,0.24314597005509966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26295341653742443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360249714764623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16627772391897802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588513648978026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359557020678549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21808241353921615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20074713426957214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071127627020369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kaylin98k,2020/01/28,"I feel really bold outside, but during/afterwards I feel sick I dont really know how to explain this but like, in social situations I can be very outgoing, sometimes almost brash. It feels almost like some kind of compulsion, like my brain makes me act this way, but at the same time I feel sick and I'm sitting there grinding my teeth going ""why oh why do I act like this! This isnt me! I'm not a loudmouth!"" And afterwards I'll feel really sick and tired and just hate myself for acting like that. 
I literally spend 75% of my time in my room alone, I dont understand why I have to be this two faced personality. 

Does anyone know what this might be? I'm genuinely lost here.",3.1069652406417134,4.720232397058826,4.675935828877005,83.5594385026738,74.29411764705883,8.474866310160428,23.39304812834225,9.095868883498916,1.6852147058823537,530,15,110,12,11,178,81,136,0.188,0.674,0.139,-0.8894,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,4,9,1,0,2,0,10,7,3,2,0,25,26,8,0,0,5,0,5,5,0,1,4,0,1,1,9,4,0,0,9,0,1,4,4,2,0,1,1,5,16,7,8,21,2,13,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,4,8,60,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753928652491813,0.14241892111663268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615021084555332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350667173862564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203359546702967,0.0,0.32232146409588425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34764601658751954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781501194582696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576268668571814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319553652817552,0.15114383352655367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3359022758939186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010844253838496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178901338267537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458764122136445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200684549387679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642773407456022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15456703613232078,0.0,0.14017415941637232,0.0,0.0,0.13600093664401555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16036640964296886,0.15804755193212022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13432731916233231,0.14315279167811198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346017667585458,0.0,0.10914906193245927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722442436051739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BiggletNibblet,2020/01/28,"I need advice I’m really into clothes and fashion. I love Tyler the creator and his vibrant style. I also love zillakami, with his dark edgy style. The two styles are EXTREMEMLY different. It has gotten to a point to where it is affecting the way I look on myself and I’m losing my identity by obsesseing over trying to find who I am. I hate boring clothes, and i always want to be the best dressed, even if I don’t dress classy or shit or whatever. I just want to be me, and looking up to people who resemble nothing of each other is fucking difficult becuase it’s like I want to be one or the other, and if I try to be one or the other on different days, shit looks wierd, especially for people that know me. It seem petty, but I’m honestly asking for advice",3.828896103896103,4.8797866948051976,5.654415584415585,79.45876623376623,71.66233766233766,8.976623376623376,28.285714285714285,9.339509955726095,2.467748051948052,597,22,117,13,11,206,94,154,0.08800000000000001,0.775,0.13699999999999998,0.7546,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,4,13,4,1,7,0,10,5,2,1,0,25,28,14,0,6,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,8,0,3,1,3,17,5,18,23,2,9,0,1,3,3,7,7,3,7,2,84,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928301176769997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982138396994366,0.12467304638872632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007361500715718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15724047379510295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662987995029852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130871579958918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896327348281546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369446338350186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851818025433865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14792905266708758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234429008396729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320082811374311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3774659129909655,0.16762478441979226,0.0,0.0,0.2704602376624672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109925984935204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376879012378438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20306141668590488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077506521311636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164060112405885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598684688273937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364023222090535,0.0,0.0,0.3076028118857308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20345352303675246,0.0,0.14636505475906808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26512612977226835,0.1189304493402348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theotherguy1994,2020/01/28,"Explaining the way my mind works, not sure what's wrong? I'm not where to ask this question but essentially I've felt that my thinking patterns aren't very healthy but I'm not sure what's wrong?

I've suspected I might have ADHD (family history also supports this), but I've also considered that I might have an anxiety and/or personality disorder. I thought I'd atleast describe, to the best of my ability anyway, the way I think and behave to get some opinions 

I'd describe my thoughts as moving *fast*, I'm obsessive, anxious, deeply analytical and scatter-brained. If I'm not doing a task that requires a lot of cognitive effort and attention, or simply doing a task I find boring, I tend to go on auto-pilot and get lost in thought, this can last hours. Im endlessly curious and have a very vivid and detailed imagination so it's easy to get lost in thought. However I have very little control over this. 

I tend to seek out mentally stimulating material as a way to be productive and distract my over-thinking mind, otherwise I tend to look inward and obsess about myself - - typically in a very self-critical way. Although I keep myself busy with a steady flow of random tasks I also find that I struggle to finish many of these tasks, or at least procrastinating due to difficultly maintaining focus. 

Everyday I think about how I can improve my life but I struggle so much with just implementing the change I want to see. I'm extremely self critical and a perfectionist, I set the bar high for myself to a fault. 

 I have many recurring thoughts (mostly negative) and they bounce around in my head like a pinball machine. It's just so damn noisy and chaotic. I'd love to be able to just slow it down and have peace of mind, I feel like my own worst enemy.",5.5414013975155285,6.725754074404764,6.507986542443064,74.42324534161493,67.7797619047619,10.129192546583852,33.358695652173914,10.276239652853533,3.590966770186337,1403,63,255,36,23,467,178,336,0.19399999999999998,0.662,0.14400000000000002,-0.9427,1,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,1,7,15,21,1,5,16,0,15,4,1,3,2,65,47,29,0,2,14,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,14,16,1,3,17,1,0,3,6,14,0,0,8,5,31,7,36,35,8,29,0,2,3,1,7,13,1,11,10,157,45,3,0.08861619584095487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649944666410772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21259901939358566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677911472651362,0.10011107770296657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888720202298624,0.08284418080417165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299723035026636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892498169405256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374418511148327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939059882370747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015618377808971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835394627993895,0.0,0.044807011235951606,0.06330742801513131,0.08508544488256391,0.0,0.16198719516176802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13889491448488892,0.0,0.0503626262574492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094578270593877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362787627273317,0.0,0.0,0.08726910253003195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572069812378528,0.0,0.0,0.07876614653169073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223402705648271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259223981472492,0.0865867942218835,0.08881670854259748,0.0,0.0,0.0744152859471725,0.0,0.1934700917171409,0.07533832075882807,0.07997957655374216,0.0,0.0,0.179685827441615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893042826559818,0.1880155597718915,0.2684312884847144,0.0,0.0,0.0941849920107122,0.06514310025327788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737624412230731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992704201110231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061563490768863,0.0,0.1848920374726071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18528177706376006,0.0,0.0,0.10056060889088403,0.16703943170099966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271267205188945,0.0,0.3517568048629409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924705688303623,0.05226812827346011,0.2813576460566212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451364598601379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19377579789721103,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sasha1Oct,2020/01/28,"Why am I so difficult? (personal question) Hey guys,

So about six months ago I learned something about myself that has made my life rather unbearable. On top of that, I'm trying to recover from an eating disorder (I'm doing well because I'm afraid for my brain now haha), Maladaptive Daydreaming Disorder, and anxiety. I know I need to get help, and have gone to counciling at my university, but I can't seem to tell the truth. When I was younger my parents made me go to therapy, where I always lied to therapist because I knew anything I shared with him or her would be told to my parents. Now I think I was also somehow unable to be open then as well.

Guys, I went to counciling for four months and didn't say anything. I want help. I know I need help. I want to be honest and get help. So why can't I?

My best guess is that often times my privacy was seriously violated (even before my ED). I was also verbally degraded even as a young child well before I even knew how to cope. Maybe those things are contributing to this mess. I just don't know.

Any advice would be really helpful. Thanks guys. :)",2.6613594470046102,4.774893050691247,4.193573732718896,84.32178917050693,77.0184331797235,8.210967741935484,25.59654377880184,8.982922981607832,2.1324379723502305,860,32,172,21,20,286,128,217,0.133,0.685,0.183,0.9333,2,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,22,15,1,1,3,1,20,3,1,3,1,32,44,16,0,7,4,2,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,5,6,6,1,0,9,0,0,3,4,6,3,2,12,1,32,9,23,26,1,17,0,0,0,0,20,5,0,6,9,114,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188260103288424,0.09242104810917044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667549001456642,0.08675346884084899,0.0,0.0,0.07090102638483414,0.0,0.07975934714000056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715957688850941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711302399705204,0.0,0.17743679136096918,0.0,0.10941544254378076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638970977869745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23898418016326875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668498833557792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20659013743141025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894409420012137,0.0,0.059253904862232865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485519920983242,0.3097042195341313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3494196105475015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17189728680602595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364259767027533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19730847788948888,0.0,0.0,0.10474414546975072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16644020319483754,0.0,0.0,0.15461635785381267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315389097818165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910366465875467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679613368102333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679223915175038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291249816078468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491525997276516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026517884048195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112867237390293,0.0959894817974336,0.11923149137459164,0.12105500761151762,0.06926634740074472,0.06680621171590967,0.0,0.0,0.060795402783461974,0.0,0.0,0.09962581293051387,0.0,0.07078634629772672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299162812560813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2812293661866104,0.09665095218140557,0.18815859484277736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481279856806664,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saltcactus,2020/01/28,I just don’t know what to do anymore Last week I tried to come out to my mom as trans and she basically shut me down. She now is continuing to force all of these girly nicknames on me and whenever I show interest in men’s clothes or literally anything masculine she denies me. I’m falling into a fucking deep depression because of it and I too scared to tell her how she’s hurting me. I feel like I’m never going to be happy. I feel like I should just stay a girl because it’s what she wants and it’ll be easier to go throughout life without the extra obstacles. I just don’t know what to do and I won’t see my therapist for another week. I really just don’t feel like talking to her anymore either she’s continuing to belittle me and it fuhking sucks. I know she means well but it’s hard to see that anymore.,2.079254901960784,3.8628127294117647,4.3088235294117645,84.35637254901962,77.58823529411767,7.827450980392157,27.215686274509807,8.648137234880735,2.0766392156862747,644,27,135,14,15,223,95,170,0.09300000000000001,0.8140000000000001,0.092,-0.038,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,8,11,2,1,3,0,11,2,0,1,2,29,28,10,0,2,8,1,4,3,0,3,1,0,0,2,10,9,0,0,7,1,0,4,6,5,1,0,0,6,27,6,21,23,3,19,0,2,2,1,14,7,2,1,10,91,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515538222898385,0.0,0.0,0.4300090708367975,0.0,0.0,0.11893706457634355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762100550830653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245010424075435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244847220232561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192383242309384,0.3097598801294693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361699219936168,0.0,0.0,0.16428110214580233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538564110365307,0.12947178608896906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472390142727202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23829210748240706,0.11781241824649158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020868340937289,0.2118322907744337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743711473930586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16927348188224234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114715606697988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09259054477630993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470119042534665,0.0,0.23034569865475965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405129013242114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616890095064332,0.12632685364345084,0.0,0.0,0.1678121477135271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09812736404210347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524839109827137,0.0,0.2318688147793509,0.0,0.129951126822555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932315561938227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rjhoffman53202,2020/01/28,"Sertraline and boners I’ve endured the sometimes problematic condition of getting aroused easily my whole life. When I was young I thought, “As soon as I get laid a few times that will pass!...”. Alas, at 33 years old and a few good romps in the bag, I still regularly got boners way too easy, to the point that it made me uncomfortable to talk to a woman I liked standing up because I’d be afraid my penis would arrive early to the party. 

I was recently prescribed Sertraline, and 3 major side effects I didn’t expect have occurred. 

1: I no longer have as many issues with above said condition. I can still get a full erection, it just takes longer. 

2: my ejaculations are massive. Like double the volume I had been accustomed to. 

3: I have troubles remembering what day and time it is. Not like Alzheimer’s level, but I used to really be on-point about it throughout the day and not so much now. 

Overall I’d say if you have a doctor you trust and that doctor recommends you try an antidepressant, give it a try.",4.2076700680272126,5.7842589846938814,5.159061224489797,81.34784353741497,71.39795918367345,8.287891156462585,27.862585034013605,8.841846274778883,2.157042585034013,795,29,153,15,15,260,130,196,0.055999999999999994,0.846,0.098,0.8288,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,3,0,1,9,7,0,1,13,0,16,6,1,3,0,19,26,13,0,3,5,0,0,3,0,2,3,2,0,1,9,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,9,2,19,5,15,13,7,24,0,0,0,3,8,7,0,1,17,97,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098701968896532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20884374585593649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314540214850073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25378193970392704,0.15532375992360184,0.0,0.1358067407149106,0.12949833182918466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689973433858753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436545455609501,0.2373106820203096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320802412915652,0.0,0.16415654235634144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190262609823836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990270649365044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3061242932232747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037269872745484,0.0,0.1598716710404801,0.0,0.18341829459958456,0.0,0.15401838007048918,0.12876142124963255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16013821750439133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586112861905818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174003764563562,0.13014125945275473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854253818182088,0.18882804502313036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198595086759764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984269777612865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12852070472052568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807724758725701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501987267408685,0.0,0.0,0.10426804409317113
mentalhealth,xckafaff,2020/01/28,"Can’t sleep, barely eat, body won’t stop buzzing Hi all,
I came off my meds for PTSD/major depressive disorder a year ago and it was really poorly handled by my psychiatrist. I had the worst withdrawals of my life and my brain basically got fried.
My thoughts are really starting to feel more ordered again, but there’s one thing that keeps setting me off into episodes where I feel electrified, I can’t focus, I can’t eat unless it’s soft food. Something set me off yesterday. Does anyone else experience this and have any tips for handling it? 
I won’t go back on anti depressants or anti psychotics because of the gross medical mistreatment I received last year. I feel insane. I see a psychologist regularly but my next appointment isn’t for a week or so. Last time it was this bad I wound up on suicide watch and I’d like to prevent that from happening again.",5.121124497991972,6.571542578313255,5.798975903614457,78.1254919678715,69.0,9.388755020080325,31.303212851405625,9.725611199111238,3.0473911646586336,692,29,128,16,12,225,112,166,0.215,0.76,0.026000000000000002,-0.9865,0,0,1,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,5,0,11,9,3,0,1,19,22,10,1,0,5,0,4,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,9,6,3,3,4,0,1,3,6,5,0,1,6,6,18,1,17,14,3,28,0,2,2,0,2,8,0,2,15,78,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13362946388662975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025141603417618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540686754177478,0.15445966939025155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591630373810267,0.12586871418221976,0.09189489622358513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744761757804075,0.0,0.16828519950645876,0.0,0.1724161425670479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596789520633515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277085970113867,0.0,0.13192104232428306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085067327778998,0.12593104158290902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746097512802064,0.0,0.0,0.2286689376941351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822857040598309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567385570629421,0.0,0.12056735947228345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330641494155304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339922075945903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457603215323305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647813509183968,0.07364811036973075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744761757804075,0.15186327043268447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16032275708773322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215109591847404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17621694824256953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314671911301007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12012704986358448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15085738488558262,0.0,0.0,0.11605357260770775,0.0,0.0,0.1067005756010922,0.0,0.0,0.12603250953977368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16489440915022316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015061566509273,0.0,0.0,0.11967748301877798,0.08790267203126034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092136661321487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941542037813356
mentalhealth,minaalove6,2020/01/28,"TW: My Story Through The Judicial System I don't really care who believes this and who doesn't. When I was 16 years old, I got my first job at Mcdonalds. I was cybered, and I worked every morning till about 4:00. In my first week of working there, the one manager yelled at me for getting drinks too slow for the drive thru window. I have really bad anxiety, so I started freaking out and rushing myself to do more than one thing at once so I wouldn't get fired. He apologized for yelling at me, and he told me to take everything at my own pace. We eventually became friends. I added a bunch of my new co-workers on my social media platforms to get to know them better. I came across his facebook page, but I didn't add it. About 20 minutes later, I got a message from him. He was apologizing once again for his attitude and he said I was cute.  I accepted his request and I asked him how he found me. He told me it was through suggested friends. Even though I was underage, my boss was pretty lenient about letting me go outside for smoke breaks at work. In November of 2018, I texted my one manager and asked him if he could get me pods after work the next day because I ran out. He told me that's fine and I was just going to run to the gas station with him and then he would take me home. We went to a gas station 20 minutes from where we worked which I guess was close to his house and he said he needed to run in his house to change. It was cold outside so he offered me to come inside. I trusted him at this point, so I went in. I sat on the couch and waited for him. He came out of the bedroom and turned the TV on. We started talking and he asked me about my boyfriend. Things escalated rather fast, and the next thing I know he's kissing me and trying to get on top of me. I pushed him off of me and told him, ""I can't do this, I have a boyfriend."" He told me my boyfriend didn't have to know. He continued getting on top of me. I pushed him away once again with more force. He told me to relax. He continued on and I pushed him really hard this time. I got up and walked away to the kitchen. I asked him if he would take me home, he said he didn't feel like driving. I told him I would get an uber/lyft instead. He got up real quick and took my phone before I could do anything. He smashed it off the wall and told me I can wait to go home at 6 when his girlfriend got there. I waited. He texted me later that night threatening my family and everything else that meant something to me and he had power over. I continued going over there so I wouldn't lose anything. Yes, I was vulnerable and dumb. He drugged me the second time I went over. The drugs interacted with other medications I was taking which resulted in a seizure and I was raped by him while I was unconcious. I woke up screaming for him to get off of me. I went to take a shower and he watched me to make sure I wouldn't hurt myself in there. There's so much more to this story, he would hit me, and mentally abuse me. I went over there almost everyday for 4 months. The drugs got harder and the beatings turned to torture. On March 23 2019, my mom found out everything that was going on with me from my sister. She asked me a lot of questions and I didn't want to be straight forward with her. I ended up hanging myself that night. She found me in my room 3 minutes after I did it and preformed CPR. I was lifeflighted to the hospital, and then sent to the mental hospital for 2 weeks. I talked to detectives when I got out and they processed my phone for evidence. On September 25, 2019, the DA told me there was not enough evidence to proceed with a trial and he would plead guilty to one charge. He got 4 years of probation, and I got a lifetime of PTSD.",2.0022150735294133,3.7820512864583335,3.2420496323529413,91.9347518382353,77.80208333333334,6.600980392156862,23.794117647058826,7.510576382923642,0.9046655330882348,2900,96,643,40,68,939,300,768,0.071,0.853,0.075,0.2825,3,0,6,0,3,3,81.0,4,0,2,13,34,20,3,0,28,1,45,8,0,4,1,93,123,51,0,15,6,2,3,1,3,8,4,6,9,0,23,53,2,3,10,3,0,27,11,8,0,7,60,11,132,12,113,50,9,122,0,2,1,2,98,53,1,6,43,423,155,9,0.0,0.05856524333818595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04949597055892094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03781302454440772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135165661749086,0.0,0.2310470591283627,0.0,0.09288028339968776,0.0,0.04127112288564835,0.03013143956580775,0.0,0.04206041039325658,0.055689519424286266,0.0,0.043715904604412416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306714068839326,0.05039612623433594,0.0,0.05228929315286897,0.04257867842348224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893001632778138,0.0,0.0,0.031877594628085315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04842156996129724,0.17196572755965991,0.0,0.04129155943201097,0.0,0.043779393562762316,0.0510733362180974,0.0,0.03264736659898737,0.0,0.04164603664216249,0.0,0.13327070531478338,0.0,0.046597231123782834,0.0,0.024992770943971523,0.03531206397816191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408850834213065,0.0,0.16258893342909694,0.07637739474720973,0.0,0.20659676166739632,0.0,0.14045810549168414,0.0,0.3557957437634241,0.0,0.0544515799402292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04427864568997438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14874385260217102,0.0,0.0,0.1140687831644034,0.05291473160307627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04905062283971207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149460292978655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05054446778267095,0.0,0.02414849657528571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055298370753464006,0.0,0.042022740238430806,0.0,0.0,0.032994219366653005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04979448416999183,0.09962554605497956,0.0,0.0,0.0578906088761426,0.03945372996556449,0.0,0.03633597819405572,0.03665095279823968,0.0,0.04773880444406906,0.10513653455702757,0.09277147444115268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05186738613235989,0.1579207103483914,0.13397738937577966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04672635077093587,0.0,0.0,0.05028702958303943,0.0,0.0,0.057779817428852076,0.0,0.05537175551124288,0.0,0.0,0.056260985946699364,0.09499638609082037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14105480051717428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05038660722975923,0.0,0.03805283376039928,0.0,0.0,0.06997215465674707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046586216531270916,0.0,0.18582215877091368,0.07945826285044992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851522818141063,0.0,0.04856370921880538,0.0,0.05764485643552334,0.0,0.0,0.4250834667298733,0.054917401184291566,0.033559024063557125,0.1075290446560692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029154485460537918,0.0,0.07929787180902963,0.0,0.0,0.229105738582644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159092605036593,0.0,0.0,0.17556460023503756,0.0,0.0,0.063661268450112
mentalhealth,ugly_bitch_,2020/01/28,"I feel like somethings wrong with the way I think When I am trying to learn something new I feel like I am very very stubborn about learning it. It’s not that I don’t want to learn it’s more so I feel like everything has to be perfect and in place for me to learn. For example if I’m in a math class and I’m learning 1x2 and I’m having a hard time understanding it, the teacher tries to approach it a different way and says just add 1 twice! (This is simplified example as I am well past learning addition by now lol) I get this intense frustrated feeling and my brain feels overloaded and I refuse to learn it the other way.  

The most serious thing I can think of as far as it’s ill effects on myself has been my refusal to learn a new topic if I haven’t learned an old one. For example, if I ever miss a class, the next class I go to I will not listen or take notes because I still haven’t learned information from the past class. I have mainly fixed this now but I used to get an intensely uncomfortable feeling when I would take notes after missing a class. 

It’s frustration in a way that is not normal, normal people take frustration of learning something new and not understanding concepts and they go learn those concepts. I let it stop me from learning. I wish I could describe the feeling, it is a very deep agitation like it feels like something is gnawing at my heart and my head. I get very snappy when this happens and I obsess and can’t stop thinking about the feeling. It just doesn’t feel normal.",3.731582323592304,5.101864065573771,4.631575196008555,85.47554526015679,72.27868852459017,7.665003563791875,28.99857448325017,8.18289091462,1.909364932287954,1200,48,244,18,23,389,141,305,0.138,0.772,0.09,-0.9343,1,0,4,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,13,16,4,1,18,1,23,4,3,2,2,71,56,23,0,10,11,0,11,5,0,2,1,2,0,0,21,14,0,5,30,0,0,3,9,9,1,2,1,13,32,7,29,50,3,33,0,2,0,0,6,8,0,5,23,159,53,19,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052731151166186534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656545313045824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906524684026054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037675289032228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824650820706253,0.0,0.0,0.07774291359506054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43738288037321227,0.24718975401832435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355820352459657,0.0,0.09832278443945124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649391866771922,0.0,0.07748929334135053,0.0,0.0887765715687887,0.0,0.0,0.10250593741508872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884547173871816,0.0,0.2113038808793788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506341034389015,0.0919964425315202,0.0,0.2542623962538719,0.0,0.0,0.0907698741962552,0.0,0.058616366109853664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16515294255034338,0.05996997599852959,0.0,0.09037675289032228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687902991621676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663755543360597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908104761158744,0.1446400090865977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951174550975388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057468450055959165,0.16628202231646658,0.0,0.0,0.050440332132422216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745910559767728,0.0,0.0,0.18010440899694982,0.0,0.07471042896469994,0.0,0.2854946498122503,0.05102144478143522,0.2746467890911944,0.0,0.0,0.07777618036003874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947366266503764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06144892914396467,0.09457695826283516,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HubertoE,2020/01/28,"My friend is acting really odd Quite recently my flatmate has been acting in a strange way. He is a male and is a 1st year uni student like me. Normally he is a calm and jokeful but he's been displaying weird behaviours.

The other night he stayed up untill 4am when he is normally in bed early. He also decided to go for a walk at 1am by himself. Whenever we play games with him, he now mutes himself or goes afk and returns after.

I want to talk to him about this but one, I don't want to be too nosy (he might perceive me as being forceful) and two, he is the type of person to hide what is going on and say everything is fine.

Any advice or similar stories that happened to you would be greatly appreciated by me",2.083929313929314,3.8483981621621663,4.317567567567568,84.3850207900208,77.51351351351352,7.526819126819128,26.249480249480253,8.384062270229773,1.8537779625779625,560,22,115,11,13,194,103,148,0.048,0.828,0.12300000000000001,0.8832,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,1,0,1,5,8,0,0,7,0,17,0,0,0,0,19,22,13,0,5,4,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,2,4,7,0,0,2,3,0,5,1,1,0,2,2,1,13,7,20,15,0,21,0,0,0,0,21,5,0,3,10,76,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20427581383273288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671727684242031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215739213080475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878756693446904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150722088972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23760955287337315,0.0,0.0,0.23047224037354985,0.0,0.0,0.1848573137527631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021285573682598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22176312282775498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961740520794556,0.4096383466682609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14165392713223288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18252954755514766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22234450075378515,0.0,0.0,0.13391922538403292,0.0,0.2064061717123196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16624053436987304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22281356583208287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680220077180608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20420604898680844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24659966152476015,0.16592975149685082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484991770898888,0.0,0.0,0.1346177698221059
mentalhealth,GingerMermicorn,2020/01/28,"A hole where my trauma used to live I know I'm being cryptic but I'm wondering if anyone else knows this feeling and has found a way to fill the hole where their trauma lived?

It's been 8 years since my abuser died. He overdosed on prescription opioids when I was 23. He hadn't done anything to me in years but I was still scared of him and just wished we would disappear. When he died I didn't feel anything but relief.

Even though I'm free I still feel the same pit that he placed in me. Without the fear, and shame, and guilt I don't know what to do with it. I try to do everything my therapist says I should do but it's not enough. And I put myself in risky situations just to feel that rush of joy followed by shame.

It's a self destructive cycle and I don't know how to break it.",1.9359024807527845,3.442586101796412,3.0525620188195037,94.42330838323356,77.20359281437126,6.448075278015399,20.91060735671514,7.1686216300943375,0.2758643284858855,617,15,144,7,14,198,97,167,0.237,0.662,0.10099999999999999,-0.9798,1,0,1,0,1,0,12.0,1,0,1,0,11,11,1,5,6,0,15,0,0,2,0,33,31,15,2,4,9,0,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,9,8,0,0,10,0,1,5,6,8,0,0,7,5,19,4,16,21,2,20,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,2,6,90,28,0,0.0,0.17174724913467654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135547990560004,0.14852290256044992,0.2385702242526641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008795431250663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833866814730956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210907927758054,0.0,0.0,0.14977663370979816,0.0,0.0957410075544148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13027565909630034,0.0,0.0,0.1631139885660787,0.2931731800783902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15893500686598766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31865256762594896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559947642670114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15144648567066654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457191987076563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527354903961888,0.14512463197392828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121904223753652,0.0,0.0,0.119907769396505,0.16293480780757033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23152152633585515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16830321924852792,0.0,0.0,0.14241695228589327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841451581235557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251940520963702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505804777881147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16669039488165244,0.13973085933346602,0.15719685270800776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297143977249244,0.0,0.0,0.18669174939809235
mentalhealth,HD_ADHD,2020/01/28,"Very minor, not seeking diagnosis, just wondering if this is common.  Basically I'm 18 years old and in college, doing my A-Levels and everything feels grey. I spend my time doing useless stuff that makes me happier outside of Work and Sixth Form instead of revising or working, just because if I break out of my bubble I can't handle everything at once. I also find that socially I feel as if I need to perform, and that if I'm not funny then I have no value to my friends and peers. I also don't want to be in a relationship, despite feeling lonely, because I know that I'd fuck it up due to my ADHD, and would cause a partner more pain than joy. Things also aren't stable at home because I'm the main cause of A LOT of stress and anger. Overall, I just have no motivation or passion other than the media I escape to, and life feels like a long walk I'm taking alone through a grey desert, and I keep on going but 'deep down' I really don't care about anything. Again, this isn't me fishing for your pity and diagnosis, but I don't know how many of you people feel this too, plus I didn't know where else to post.",7.996157205240173,5.348178419213977,8.593401746724894,74.23953493449783,63.9344978165939,11.256069868995633,36.00043668122271,9.3871,3.1109542358078586,874,30,179,12,10,296,137,229,0.126,0.7859999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.8157,0,3,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,4,12,12,2,1,7,0,14,4,0,5,0,45,35,25,0,7,13,0,5,1,2,1,2,0,1,1,11,12,0,1,11,0,1,2,11,7,0,0,1,7,24,5,27,32,4,22,0,3,2,2,6,10,1,8,9,121,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600874122028742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796097261636692,0.0,0.3195737435043221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961697314283853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436029459488651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13581212837267698,0.2736779738516303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127630215489694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394334577009189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3367641195325593,0.09516220639273708,0.0,0.0,0.12174763200994633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029144233422384,0.1231465590437777,0.0,0.0,0.07570389107019418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361621691793896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839938105237488,0.0,0.0,0.21961917119017926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408715265464404,0.06507759548104618,0.0,0.0,0.1178828870709137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324675561958153,0.0,0.0,0.08891586498819293,0.13504971164490956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877036745383967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977701522153685,0.14185976442456144,0.0,0.0,0.14174029775369776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234808709614246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757427627409015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533500718365866,0.0,0.0,0.143013112582402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578647568132646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258672370531584,0.0,0.1524887016973615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015413789597527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849597390497797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767333748870421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990868491839496,0.07856819596797121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14445594151919827,0.1939507285938596,0.0,0.0,0.09462553496253984,0.0,0.0,0.08578012844589808
mentalhealth,hiimbabycookie,2020/01/28,I need help Ive gotten drunk the last 4 nights. My father was an alcoholic and I'm so fearful I'm headed down that road but I dont know what to do with myself. Im virtually alone all day. How do I not get bored and start drinking? Help me.,-2.206666666666667,-0.4791972222222238,0.953703703703706,98.91166666666668,104.55555555555556,3.8814814814814818,13.407407407407408,5.82211442006289,-0.9799481481481488,186,4,46,2,9,65,43,54,0.127,0.731,0.14300000000000002,0.2175,0,1,2,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,5,4,1,1,1,9,12,5,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,7,0,3,10,1,6,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917475223569006,0.0,0.28273941371286354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17605852110864176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199468900305374,0.2674301526387366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071941038198581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14262807760968224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801705635262944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659641962048345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29488032470053177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003034197477014,0.22252651485363295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20242156355158744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25618633999422524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19322653122639308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheaArcane,2020/01/28,"Can reading about a crime case give you anxiety? I’m not really sure where else to post this. I took a really dark turn tonight after watching a YouTube video about a movie based on the murder of Junku Furuta. It led me to reading mangas based on it, one which was horrifically graphic and I feel so strange. I really don’t know how to describe it but I feel incredibly anxious beyond belief even though I’m perfectly safe in my own home. It’s been like this for hours and I’ve tried watching different stupid and funny videos to take my mind off of it but nothing’s working and I can’t sleep. I suffer from anxiety and other mental disorders but I’ve never felt this way before (I read about true crime often and watch extremely graphic movies) I don’t know what’s going on or what to do, please help.",2.8022083333333327,5.018290637500002,4.057500000000001,84.97083333333336,77.0,7.2666666666666675,23.791666666666664,8.238735603445708,1.5073416666666668,642,21,125,12,15,210,104,160,0.174,0.675,0.15,-0.0803,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,2,10,8,2,0,5,0,7,1,1,2,4,26,19,13,1,0,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,12,6,0,1,6,5,0,3,5,3,0,1,4,6,12,5,19,15,1,16,1,1,3,0,3,7,0,2,5,75,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382787108628313,0.1759399235777463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252180283934745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16271335199040832,0.17848955767516425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300993463167794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286366298386272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574919042623979,0.0,0.14953316869321082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493983460742033,0.08850965166113317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438808407660023,0.0,0.15621818969278053,0.0,0.1533708315016705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17117936797661526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608585537077281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15694755291994314,0.0,0.1572512635148572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011495998182735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14943507681623544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553228685706158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095386053335626,0.0,0.0,0.14915421908064316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4673412651873259,0.0,0.2993097839577094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15585074906056154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678148274031202,0.0,0.1170958022405272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301206617027566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17303095581209196,0.10573606697724128,0.16939852372077235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12361779505583538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337932030038167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Flushoi,2020/01/28,"Im hearing voices and hallucinating I started to hallucinate when i was a child, maybe when i was around 7 or 8. I would start seeing things like green people, they were alien shaped and then when i told my family they said ""its your imagination "" i could probably under stand them because i was at a young age. But it started to get worse within my years. When i turned 10 all of the sudden i felt more pressured and stressed, and i had a huge anxiety problem. This was mainly because of family issues, school, and drama. I felt like i was being watched every second. And i would stay up for countless nights because i would hallucinate. I would see dark figures every where even when the lamp was on. I barely got sleep and started to lose my high grades. I dont have good memory but i believe i was around the age 13 when i started hearing voices. I was on my computer then all of the sudden i hear breathing outside my room, i peeked outside my room, nobody was there, no pets,no siblings, nobody. I was home alone. I got my bat as a weapon and searched the house. Nobody was there. I resumed going to my computer and then i started to hear breathing right beside me. I got so scared i jumped and had a panic attack. After that it just got horribly worse. I started to hear voices more often and hallucinations. Somtimes i wouldnt  see myself in the mirror. Id see somthing else. So few years later i started taking melatonin which really helped me. I finally started getting sleep. I would get 9 full hours compared to 2 hours i used to get. My grades came back up and i became more healthier and started to even eat normally. I dont have anymore voices but barely i have Hallucinations. Thanks for reading this far. (:",2.4183400267737625,5.0062317710843365,3.6807630522088353,85.09914323962519,80.68674698795179,5.857563587684068,23.98125836680053,7.1686216300943375,1.16794953145917,1356,49,250,18,36,441,166,332,0.135,0.8240000000000001,0.040999999999999995,-0.9816,0,1,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,3,1,18,12,2,4,11,0,27,5,4,1,2,38,64,29,0,9,5,0,2,2,0,6,0,10,3,1,8,16,1,0,4,2,0,3,4,8,0,1,23,18,54,4,26,33,8,57,0,1,6,0,13,19,0,2,35,172,62,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400717743961051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05466387445629122,0.0,0.07086544942047969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722251448930216,0.0,0.08129185782061794,0.0,0.05494548450940182,0.0,0.13067729303258568,0.0,0.0,0.08050678132782667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172697183299271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05705204166236101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16749250449948327,0.0,0.0,0.07311763470819807,0.05969257016838534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09439242539298512,0.0,0.12041003046110245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472528171714113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372185090459485,0.07827688466803633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493318714772458,0.0,0.04061026240283363,0.05993415481173282,0.228600525330459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4026822209121913,0.0,0.047895652129668766,0.07549750491999686,0.07167649579966988,0.0,0.14074012484129295,0.08245097710919598,0.0,0.0,0.07718506672622892,0.07458181300825932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981987825646296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994132267718469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717874584396945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705689763087466,0.07001200308358982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383857275948997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049538801722843334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704197787890628,0.06837402939231098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147563779669938,0.0,0.045776735975999065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610232903731083,0.06797130530048506,0.0,0.0715402226600642,0.07231759118521965,0.2277656807398733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301581118541146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5057713742391308,0.0761629089902296,0.0,0.0,0.08185295103412782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05372624528525053,0.0,0.0,0.06578736123415221,0.0,0.0,0.047472391063006096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827955751794694,0.0,0.0,0.07772393597583305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617153011233753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564015020579704,0.2538025292038265,0.0,0.0,0.09203102973681164
mentalhealth,Polikokokliko,2020/01/28,"I don't see myself in a mirror...just someone. Everyday, when I get ready for school, I look in the mirror and see someone that look like me but I can't say to myself ""it me"".",-1.2689473684210526,0.7308784210526333,1.6582105263157914,96.71047368421057,93.73684210526315,4.092631578947368,15.494736842105262,5.6839178017228535,-0.7387536842105265,132,3,31,1,5,46,27,38,0.0,0.889,0.111,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,7,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,8,1,4,7,0,4,0,0,4,0,1,2,0,0,3,21,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16200236973928614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514878990072652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5207729619033729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465855773398382,0.0,0.3138143526883381,0.4941822487072162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5254542615309782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IDoztKnoze,2020/01/28,"I need some sort of guidence. Where did I go wrong. I don't know what to do anymore and my mind is racing I feel like I'm loosing my mind .

I can't find a job. I have nothing productive to do that will actually improve my situation. I stopped working because my mental health got so bad that I couldn't anymore. And after that everything has gone down the drain. I don't know what I'm doing anymore. I feel so alone and worthless.

Focus on things that make you feel good they say. What's the point when everything that's actually important feels impossible!? What's the point on focasing on pleasures? I don't want that. I want something more but I'm weak and lazy and uneducated and Society puts limits and expectations on people, they put levels and will put you down whenever.
 I think i used all my luck up as a child, running around thinking it would never end that I'd be full of ambition and will power. But here am I'm to stupid and lazy to even make efforts to finish things I started. I see the end befor I even start and I'm disabled by my doubts and uncertainties.
 
I just want to wake up and be a new person.

What's wrong with me?I don't know what's happening. I'm tired of lying to myself everyday by distracting myself with pointless things. I can't find the meaning. 

I want to escape from my mind, from myself and join the world and become one and at peace. I wish to remove the shackles of my conscieceness.

What if you're born into this world without a purpose?I was . My existence is pointless and I don't know how to take back the fact that I've given up. I don't know how to stop.I don't think I'm hard on myself. I think I'm realistic

You should be more confident in yourself. You are a wonderful person they say. I don't believe that.

Just be yourself. Authenticity is an admirable trait they say.That's what I do though. That what I think I do. I to pretend for a bit but I also got to be unfiltered me.  I am me. I can't run from it and there is no point in actually running from it because it will find you and grab you by the face.

Why am I stuck? Why don't I try? What is there to try? I try I fail I try I fail I self sabtoge over and over. I loose any friends I might've had and run away from ones who still try. What is wrong with me

I think I gave up a long time ago.I don't know how to take it back

Everything is just an illusion. A farce.Ah the freedom of this delusion. The fact that we even sit up in our concrete jungles and contemplate who we are and what the point of exsistence is, is stupifying. 

What is the point of all this tragity and questioning? Why do we not live like the animals around us, each made perfec to suit thier survival. They do not care about thier purpose or where they came from. They do not give up on life because of a great sadnest or madness plaguing them. The awareness of the state of the world ,the human condition, and one's self is pointless. 

Can a fox not enjoy the beauty of the world just as much as the pain like we can? But I do not see the fox questioning its self. Doubting itself. Failing to continue. To just move. That's what everyone says. Just go just move and everything will get better. Why!? Why here I am stuck and my only problem is that I won't move 

 I feel frozen. Not with fear but.....this numbness this coldness toward myself and the world. I see the beauty in it only to weap in sorrow.

I find myself frozen unable to move like everyone's advice says. There are many paths all diverging and turning into rollercoasters that will train my mind and show me more about myself. But I am frozen looking onward to where people point me, in directions that suit them or directions in which they think is best. And it all feels false to me . A lie. A waste of time. Pointless. Empty. Meaningless.

 Why I ask over Again over . Like a lunatic. Like I don't already know that there's no point in asking why. And all of this will be chalked up by others to be depression and end at that and hope that medicating me and ignoring the voices in my head I tell them about will push me back into action. Back into society to what? Live the exsistence of a clown. Everyday just waiting for the next.",1.3020279036701332,3.6438428465171206,2.826870548806035,91.0168342410278,83.34474616292798,6.051511343006943,21.858412359878635,7.359569317364363,0.7950866410227113,3269,108,692,51,93,1067,312,847,0.165,0.7340000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.9947,2,1,1,0,0,2,96.0,6,6,11,10,40,38,2,4,43,0,70,10,3,7,8,143,137,55,0,13,24,0,8,6,1,11,7,5,0,7,54,51,0,4,28,2,0,18,26,21,0,3,12,18,103,17,100,106,14,100,0,6,4,0,44,55,0,13,31,473,157,6,0.0,0.0,0.14456070050148595,0.0,0.0,0.04825270664522582,0.04377161239549338,0.0,0.0,0.051141878554433085,0.054491089151385536,0.039488466120852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03357949632527129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691246173757194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791577534098881,0.09232562698529467,0.0,0.0463933106950081,0.15187798768233096,0.041229504404638365,0.09030316357555893,0.0545353608632561,0.04201799598170607,0.05563336119440149,0.05182034221739727,0.043671820765195005,0.053909212276821744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056476560959443124,0.0503453059494488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04253016552782191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13120573710069647,0.0,0.0,0.09784333336815007,0.0,0.0,0.09436773456689873,0.17751508391664814,0.0,0.0,0.05556524060047708,0.14980540692924796,0.03527645471043807,0.0,0.0,0.18052649216547545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038150187261320224,0.0,0.02579855326068664,0.047368953413872185,0.05612658608860215,0.04141686485943035,0.07898598965937989,0.05444065646322184,0.0,0.0,0.04366579461551135,0.0,0.044233994373364886,0.0,0.05067722517434412,0.05248769774393452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04904460999414459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049001159382639686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18996231899886945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03487793426896562,0.14474486899832198,0.0,0.08720533900252514,0.04369896920769751,0.04146602613286223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046723719289148216,0.06592189490332807,0.0500626794721205,0.0,0.05378833997664758,0.0,0.04974427059088536,0.04976254100559778,0.052383445253576966,0.19943534775165772,0.0,0.0,0.20992876881839115,0.03629933639434897,0.03661399337294713,0.03808422310687649,0.04769066384630292,0.052515256570772176,0.0,0.0,0.04738059943843605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003817132749648,0.07511009496462674,0.05254286742487657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684665317363069,0.08623188959096469,0.0,0.0,0.3267546180370661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04724915107473405,0.0,0.1489189690132467,0.1106318354394579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963412992216336,0.0,0.0,0.11804630158444482,0.0,0.154539580679161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055504202169346685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03801446065522302,0.0,0.0,0.06990159358192781,0.0,0.03943423071231551,0.08256631428958776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425390905648424,0.0,0.04315952920761774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841588380048302,0.2214810332999176,0.048514736773459084,0.0,0.0575867264115467,0.056754036917036975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16762591295098184,0.05371030529697102,0.0,0.0,0.059397004021931,0.042647707211606614,0.0,0.0,0.11650034238619725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31189884098842324,0.0,0.05678355350642026,0.047599711627615116,0.053549551569084,0.03594858900738948,0.0,0.0,0.035077511599308366,0.16196495512815975,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ToonlinkFTW890,2020/01/28,"I am WAY too hard on myself+ ADHD+GAD+MDD+SH urges/thoughts, help? I just got back to college, and my mental health is already utter trash. Around a year ago was when I first got depressed. I did not get treated for it for awhile b/c I thought it would go away. In addition, to the depression I later realize that my ADHD meds were no longer effective and I needed a higher dose. So for the whole semester I had to deal with my ADHD and depression. During that time my depression was pretty bad. I also later discover that I have GAD. Back to the depression, where I started to self harm nearly everyday, and suidical thoughts and long crying episodes. Again due to my GAD I had tore out large amount of hair and parents thought that had cut it myself. 

Today I am on Concerta 54 mg, Zoloft 150 mg and zyprexa 2.5 mg. Till this day I STILL have urges to hurt myself. I am very hard on myself which causes me to stress and have urges to SH. Like my review sheet had caused my so much stress that I started to cry and I was dying to SH. The sheet was just for review of last semester (which I forgot most of!), it merely given to aid us students, yet I am SO hard on myself and hence the stress. IDK what to do. Every time I am stressed I want to SH, I simply CAN'T live like that! I have tried other things like art, no avail. I still prefer SH over other de-stressing methods. 

Advice? Please?",2.3422575250836104,4.462708688405801,3.342753623188408,90.0038628762542,78.05797101449275,6.130211817168338,22.209587513935343,7.1686216300943375,0.7085517279821625,1082,32,220,13,26,346,153,276,0.215,0.735,0.051,-0.9926,1,0,1,0,0,2,42.0,1,0,0,2,16,17,1,4,7,0,23,4,1,3,0,30,36,16,1,4,3,1,4,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,17,14,0,1,6,1,0,1,4,13,0,1,17,4,38,4,33,18,4,36,0,6,0,0,5,11,0,1,26,150,55,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31126212097146,0.08436243053672378,0.07652792696885047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526928214003136,0.06903950496737066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685360061579269,0.0,0.0,0.08111156291506201,0.13276764223935766,0.07208344242682996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773730685255814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896628451241808,0.05567686547919117,0.0890042894375805,0.3717872410180368,0.0,0.08959877278374079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273826042772596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343378040176582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04510479947590637,0.0,0.04906434839994235,0.0,0.1380948454354344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320089920626687,0.0,0.0,0.09176666062510587,0.0,0.0,0.05786638213813997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241997169812616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037193516702113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653206219289148,0.0,0.07623255632189363,0.0764009215361925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589516171367687,0.0,0.08700214352288517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346380250983126,0.06401393180506551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586124124723024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947663855421884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783047196968391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006289005420362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221217715970642,0.0,0.13788936540686308,0.0,0.4944638952667349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05735500823385761,0.0,0.0,0.2741512062952533,0.10068152741048564,0.0,0.08183244678865548,0.0,0.0,0.05861362157963537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384651917521892,0.0,0.0,0.07123277195904626,0.05092072924697024,0.06852616015565646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638636560790567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06132762991836362,0.0,0.0,0.055594845236672366
mentalhealth,Stanford_ED_Research,2020/01/28,"Free Treatment Study- Female Participants Wanted The Stanford Eating Disorders Research Program currently has a free treatment study occurring at Stanford University called Eating Behavior Treatment, funded by the National Institutes of Health, and it is designed to help women improve functioning and reduce eating problems. 

We are inviting all **females** between the **ages of 18 and 34**  to participate. The study consists of three assessments, three surveys, and 8 weekly one hour group therapy sessions spread out over 9 months. Each assessment involves completion of an interview, a short survey, and collection of ECG data. **This is a free treatment study, and participants can receive up to $205 for participating.**

If you have serious body image and eating concerns this is a great opportunity to work on them, so please contact us!  **Below is the link for the questionnaire to determine your eligibility.** Look forward to hearing from you. This is best for people in **northern California/Bay Area**.

[https://stanforduniversity.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_0DqxwTfqbSRxDVz](https://stanforduniversity.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0DqxwTfqbSRxDVz)",9.393888888888894,14.002658018518527,7.800617283950618,49.82277777777779,79.92592592592592,8.572839506172839,36.2469135802469,8.626192665926032,5.059187654320988,957,49,98,25,27,289,117,162,0.022000000000000002,0.797,0.18100000000000002,0.9821,1,0,0,0,0,0,61.0,2,3,1,3,1,8,0,0,11,0,9,6,1,0,1,15,12,9,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,10,4,0,1,0,4,2,0,2,0,3,0,2,6,9,24,12,3,17,0,0,1,0,15,11,0,1,6,69,10,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17428609159812164,0.0,0.0,0.1844725477183589,0.0,0.0,0.16958175153649546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17412710233204245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19033702074444955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6797471807239315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18309893051662504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17653059214461814,0.18717926631865128,0.0,0.11131697104948256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355100834668518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394616731491958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255995600446566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125371216913306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11513590716498184,0.0,0.0,0.18230113247240545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891191605021765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899219172721236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997684932336251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979556891922486,0.0,0.1332158253152165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090501159333708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imscaredforbf,2020/01/28,"Partner is having symptoms of schizophrenia and I don't know how I should act Hi.

First of all, TW for possible suicidal thoughts and alcohol

​

My partner of two years has been diagnosed with Schizotypal personality disorder and subsequently given treatment to alleviate their symtomps. They started with the treatment in September/October and everything was pretty ok, they didn't suffer depressive symtoms anymore, which is great because they used to suffer them a lot. However, a few weeks ago they started having worrying symptoms.  


They started to feel dissociated from their body and doing weird (and hurtful) things while on that state, doubting about everything (including our relationship, but I don't blame them), feeling that something (like a spirit) is around them and staring at them through the door or pressing their back and chest and today I discovered that they seriously believe in spirits to a point where considering their mental state, it scares me (they thought for a moment that me maybe that presence they felt was an angry spirit). And something that scares me about that is that they refuse to tell the psychiatrist because in their own words ""they don't believe in that"".  


Furthermore, they have been drinking to relax, despite it being harmful combined with their medication and this morning was asked a question in ask about what they have wanted to do for a long time but they haven't and why and well... they said there was something that they have been wanting to do for a long time, but they don't because it would make the people close to them sad. They always joke with dead and stuff, but I can't help to think that this is serious (and I can't ask them about it because they will get angry at me).  


Sadly, I can't be there for them because I live in the north of the country, so I've been thinking about telling their parents because honestly, I'm very scared for their wellbeing and I don't know what I should do, since in this state my partner is quite a compulsive liar because they think that lies hurt less than truth (they told me they are going to tell everything to their psychiatrist, but I fear they know that that will get them in the hospital for a while and that they won't do it because of that).   


I feel like if I don't tell their parents, they might do something stupid.  


Thank you very much for your time and I'm sorry for my english, it's late here and I'm scared. I'll give more info if it is required.",9.836904240908616,8.28893866520788,8.518587058455768,72.74885485047409,59.50328227571117,11.505637178284886,40.36146712514328,10.181067101454742,4.005034677503386,1978,85,353,32,21,605,209,457,0.165,0.7659999999999999,0.069,-0.9940000000000001,3,0,6,0,0,0,53.0,1,2,42,3,14,29,2,6,18,1,48,8,2,3,2,63,81,31,2,7,8,2,5,2,3,7,5,1,1,4,31,25,2,2,14,3,0,2,12,19,1,2,15,7,66,10,50,57,7,39,3,7,1,0,66,16,0,7,20,259,97,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670714261865176,0.08086163088753748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629583736694932,0.08198173575389722,0.09193984374821228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503819480290726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06735685657561816,0.21220642112234725,0.0,0.0,0.05818082018633317,0.0,0.368991781884688,0.0,0.0,0.17049446774514293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404546569177318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516915191804483,0.07679720182164948,0.0,0.0,0.08671731238446989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412175471508282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20400533353098688,0.0,0.0,0.08514285239934857,0.11477372826035954,0.05405426025559845,0.07264914917324093,0.0,0.0,0.06435962108079513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906246382284236,0.07258364699305038,0.04300150222853668,0.0,0.0,0.08341964738531055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050715875001276986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199940480379188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474859806885286,0.0,0.08535210379620749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739310576390651,0.0,0.06681255427753338,0.13392022944728227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432668843447722,0.0,0.0,0.050506198722292936,0.0,0.07601449415554898,0.0,0.0,0.07622335551619376,0.0762513513496739,0.0802673739768953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05562162617166495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16803147350583816,0.0,0.0,0.05245577759515399,0.06606674395914873,0.0,0.0,0.07152678265786329,0.08529960749254382,0.0,0.07697732384727296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476081389819366,0.08047780427213795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123464451410994,0.0,0.0,0.07197363581062231,0.0,0.3030108019131741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06258990783691057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329988732258424,0.0,0.0846994708075579,0.16066575975847291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661699092568105,0.08276395691650452,0.0,0.0,0.15728739557225924,0.0,0.0,0.2645341141503503,0.06966109533245839,0.0,0.0,0.050267691201802765,0.1454469946914581,0.0,0.12013726965622155,0.13236057544339758,0.0,0.07172047031512423,0.07230003873519965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391257434221571,0.0,0.0,0.0653492615355881,0.0,0.12486117933017825,0.08925698286435925,0.0,0.0606929660516475,0.0,0.0680308763049498,0.0,0.06827484411586107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684029926144384,0.0,0.05374941888779848,0.0,0.09193984374821228,0.04872503027764102
mentalhealth,1guanamama,2020/01/28,"I'm still learning a lot about mental health. I'm 30 and it was only in the last 7ish years did I really even understand I had mental health issues. After struggling for 5 years, severely, I finally realized I had an issue and got help. I have depression, anxiety, PTSD and insomnia. I'm on partial disability and on 5 different medications, 3 are to help me sleep.

I've been on my medication for almost a year now, after trial and error, I finally feel happy. I notice a huge difference. It's like night and day. 

Do some people have to permanently stay on medication?? I'm not sure how to express how I feel about being on medication, but I am trying accept it works for me. If that makes sense. 

I ramble a lot when I struggle trying to figure out how I feel about something.",3.318127530364372,5.2654754078947414,5.816052631578952,74.18967611336036,74.52631578947368,9.150607287449391,26.16599190283401,9.661875296680813,2.7548880566801626,610,22,110,17,13,217,94,152,0.10099999999999999,0.8079999999999999,0.091,-0.1004,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,0,2,6,0,11,8,1,4,1,27,21,12,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,8,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,6,3,15,4,19,14,3,22,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,5,14,74,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660821097833585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08908420410817812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510084634967659,0.0,0.10029852155704146,0.0,0.0,0.2433316750346821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691436230611799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766423978108607,0.0,0.0,0.25513134735063125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313598816554247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239635700528262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475625673361493,0.0,0.0,0.15610843880542585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430878352063495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949225831020082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056891762130584375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19800385786060934,0.0,0.0,0.07773151732406489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4692459325544256,0.23470914019923486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928077116426453,0.0,0.0,0.13257950288803574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856574369588227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073201484247225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612423526502512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460108035980514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155575675243494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653445571741365,0.0,0.0,0.08964917380848139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12412058598926005,0.0929974052557392,0.0,0.0,0.2434783937336099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975308302105363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812429634335198,0.0,0.0,0.12122892812807662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477724656736199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249706351472232
mentalhealth,Chewingupsidedown,2020/01/28,"Hyper sensitive about childhood experiences, and seeing children have unpleasant experiences. Hi Reddit

Here's something I've been struggling with for a while that I have never told anyone, because it is so difficult a subject to bring up.

Whenever I see a child in a vulnerable or weak position, I feel a really strong emotional reaction to it. It's deeply unpleasant and my reaction to it is to avoid it, move away, don't look, don't think about it. It can honestly ruin my whole day. I don't have an outward or particularly animated reaction, it's more of an inside feeling. It thumps me on the inside and then it feels like it seeps into me very deeply and slowly. An horrible depressing hum that just won't go away, sometimes for days.

This happens when I think about my own childhood experiences too, but there's an important factor in this. Children have a different perspective of what really matters, of what's important, etc. So (and this is difficult for me to even type out) sometimes children become very upset when something happens that to our eyes, is inconsiquential. The more inconsiquential something is to us, while still causing the child extreme discomfort, the more upsetting this is for me to witness.

Very strong examples are things like dropping ice cream, leading to tears. Losing balloons. Dropping food. Falling out with other children over toys... I find it so difficult to see these things happen. Even when they happen in films, TV shows, etc.

I'm also very sensitive to the idea of children losing toys. Losing Teddy bears that are important to them. It's more than empathy - it's a really awful and overwhelming feeling of dread and depression that I just can't control. Sometimes it feels like it's too much for me to think about and I can't stand it.

I guess I'm saying this now because I want to finally say it out to someone and try to make sense of it.

But I also want to ask if this is normal? Does anyone know why this happens?

I have seen therapists in the past but I've never brought this up, because it's so difficult to talk about...

If anyone has anything to say about this, I'd love to talk about it, in any way.

Thanks for reading.",5.03077549140049,6.967029481572485,5.6931626228501235,76.8989331234644,69.9090909090909,9.116984029484028,31.391968673218674,9.595489714322824,3.2044005528255517,1737,76,301,41,32,563,186,407,0.165,0.7390000000000001,0.096,-0.9867,1,1,3,0,0,0,55.0,2,0,2,7,26,26,0,7,17,1,23,4,1,4,2,47,55,28,0,5,9,0,5,3,0,1,1,3,0,7,41,15,1,2,11,6,0,6,8,18,0,0,4,15,24,8,57,50,9,42,0,7,7,1,20,16,0,5,19,211,65,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126808386527673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053916525098591295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663137658378147,0.0,0.06524480710397892,0.0,0.07412078097266699,0.0,0.1489817522135773,0.0,0.0,0.14499421725213985,0.08756406362568411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144754457546327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892487963117468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226454378071444,0.0,0.1365761246038896,0.0,0.0,0.08283595972725677,0.0,0.0,0.06938284589950428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918496395192248,0.0,0.0,0.17684748675094508,0.10473400172877824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326678579831413,0.0,0.0,0.2004444146602365,0.11328245292072807,0.0,0.08685285222848774,0.07246506209858901,0.0,0.0958717479155168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04505949788870031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734137637569153,0.0,0.3505573592486173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950312485498417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04357296760957896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620395205819525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06657943934223816,0.2660989351406781,0.0,0.0,0.07155781635453218,0.0,0.05292335934215759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426741740907956,0.05828360445940407,0.0,0.12229897382093433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768247527769169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07568651262864269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930646491388242,0.0,0.1523760214303512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18915186490286415,0.0,0.0,0.1895396619568616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717793106012583,0.183112420940416,0.2352447044247156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633171108151522,0.0,0.0,0.0828859063042237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274525743678644,0.0,0.07299498425369952,0.0,0.09205600664749557,0.10534687432730412,0.1524078976447559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576022403653923,0.0,0.053829316885817685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537010403933442,0.0,0.0,0.2616737441639956,0.09352870533577212,0.06293274994065079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154238886678713,0.08851888141276172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,forcharlie,2020/01/28,"BORED AND OVER THIS feel soooo shit on and off and I’m fed up of it. Constantly questioning myself and I fucking hate myself too. Sorry just a mess but I know in the next hour I’ll feel great for a bit ( but won’t be able to enjoy it because I know that feeling good is always short-lived and followed by feeling worse than I did before- repeat repeat repeat). I’m reading this back to myself now and thinking that I sound pathetic and crazy and I am. All I want is to just not be in my own head, my brain is the fucking worst and the thought of never experiencing life as anyone but myself just kills me. I’ve got no friends, no passion but ai do have a lovely family and boyfriend, I’ve got a full time job but I am SO miserable and I hate myself for it. Why isn’t anything enough to make me feel consistently ok? My panic attacks are getting more frequent and intense- yet I clam up in therapy and have yet to find any useful coping mechanism that isn’t just deep breaths positive thoughts mood diaries and bullshit. Sick to death of it all and I’m ridiculously jealous of anyone who has a normal brain and never has to worry about the state of their mental health and thinking about any slight thing that could throw you off course. I hate it and I’m so done with it now, please I need this to stop I’m suffering and I don’t ever see it changing. I’m not strong enough",2.2104297837393894,4.227696384341641,3.3645017793594327,90.19045921160692,78.03914590747331,6.0312619764577065,23.61908020804818,7.010146845296331,0.7900532712838761,1088,36,226,12,26,351,153,281,0.273,0.583,0.14400000000000002,-0.9938,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,1,15,25,10,2,9,1,20,13,5,2,5,56,53,27,2,4,11,0,5,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,16,20,1,1,13,1,0,2,10,16,0,0,7,8,25,8,30,42,9,31,0,2,1,4,6,11,3,1,17,151,41,2,0.10968455188012677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126633381051794,0.0,0.0,0.14917851304407356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338797793488654,0.0,0.0902610404678443,0.0,0.0,0.12478201233967695,0.0,0.08434064997248439,0.0,0.06686268477092168,0.0,0.09333347500101503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974712260322462,0.0,0.0,0.24488846951489684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160317122366094,0.0,0.0,0.11853003443148676,0.0,0.08757418956306462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224537823639087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266669252421029,0.0,0.0,0.09921595673467858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340083383745063,0.0,0.2772990254131293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10024969331523563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474201269829096,0.20280320155970996,0.05730565129443579,0.0,0.0,0.09199819816873396,0.1754495120260811,0.12092760566832378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32487236075613224,0.1125679942229936,0.11658954956769545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801718933147393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884499313702536,0.0,0.12134970553699882,0.0,0.12055952242894827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774734427505025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899459044263323,0.0,0.07321529009448836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105362302132422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132970541120361,0.16919097649618134,0.0,0.1166507652686258,0.0,0.107467572607084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869118877440924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040070031162872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287180059468653,0.0,0.10971423407759713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740438694165689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258961629558632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227828758232761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170119672090432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543384417840733,0.0,0.07286954248836931,0.14056286395338735,0.0,0.17415456461896858,0.0639579442611027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947322360785155,0.0,0.0,0.06469479052764633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897324773112127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138998664911798,0.1117779289792717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Banditjumper,2020/01/28,"What can I expect when coming off sertraline (zoloft)? which might not be widely known or talked about. I have been reducing my dosage from 150 to 25 over the last year and I am at a stage were I am ready to stop completely. I am coming off  because of the side effects, mainly sexual dysfunction  and because I feel like a zombie whilst using it. I just want to see who I am again without it. Has anybody felt there life actually improved when they came off it? Did sexual functioning improve etc? Any warnings or advice? I am on a good gym routine which is my main plan to keep my serotonin flowing in the meantime.",3.7162184873949577,5.676968563025214,4.5199075630252095,83.85229831932776,73.45378151260505,7.449075630252103,27.026050420168072,8.238735603445708,1.8767808403361343,485,18,91,8,10,156,87,119,0.059000000000000004,0.8079999999999999,0.133,0.8385,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,2,6,2,0,0,6,0,14,2,0,2,0,20,23,6,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,5,0,2,4,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,5,3,13,2,15,16,3,21,0,0,1,0,3,9,0,3,8,68,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.21499590025711945,0.0,0.0,0.2152895095771837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14982192292070676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686042594099582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25198194996523443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3795641545640709,0.23099634485118425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457097381579314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139800863723236,0.1573932565083034,0.21153718720532536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18478997643323855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958263144455956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17958633142403665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561517448210946,0.10763490115203604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337196609824095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556272758176253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18419341159134447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770810501796112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19028163617193786,0.0,0.0,0.12994764087694946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21237603618114445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187579577632495
mentalhealth,OrangeJews42,2020/01/28,"I had no idea life was actually fun I (23m) have been struggling with anxiety since my teen years, I never sought help, I thought everyone had panic attacks occasionally, a couple months back my doctor prescribed me with anti anxiety meds... 

I feel like I never really been alive all these years, I suddenly wake up rested, my stomach doesn’t hurt, I was suffering from gas and diarrhea for fucking years, and it’s gone!!! I eat and I feel good, I genuinely smile, I feel focused, I can think clearly, I sleep amazing, I’m so productive during the day! 

It’s crazy how beautiful life is, the last couple of years been so hard I had suicidal thoughts on a daily basis, today it’s never even an option, I’m enjoying life too much, and I can’t wait for tomorrow to come, and the day after and after and after and I hope I live till I’m 300 years old because life is beautiful",4.439748062015504,5.48344526162791,5.984883720930233,77.68317829457366,70.22093023255815,9.454263565891472,29.449612403100772,9.725611199111238,2.8106031007751935,683,26,130,16,12,233,107,172,0.201,0.619,0.18,0.3591,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,0,6,12,2,2,6,0,14,10,3,1,5,27,28,12,1,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,11,1,1,7,0,0,2,6,6,0,0,11,4,22,6,13,17,3,25,0,2,0,1,1,2,1,2,22,80,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.122157594476692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19152467069175505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241028882305062,0.0,0.09625567096489426,0.0,0.07630854857342173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783146100850084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770185143738393,0.0,0.16146145110447754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812700486683673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280903617657492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268019038626202,0.0,0.0,0.11961482696456112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18988426404890166,0.08942859644725068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572686626393773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499502073059423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213666635539528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0839054960240376,0.0,0.0,0.12433195657219398,0.0,0.0,0.13400774821807535,0.14131295054186982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020383840874092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3536732627193565,0.0611566108504613,0.0,0.1105362079851372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390467282140336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991745873623456,0.0,0.09202168223420434,0.0,0.2896395327014671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135532225114588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468717246878213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019349497589084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355016576215134,0.0,0.12527037469189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086528539829592,0.0,0.13692657097637645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021027100807569,0.0,0.19875782881050594,0.0,0.0,0.11865597580079687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40305898637544746
mentalhealth,CanceRevolution,2020/01/28,"How to deal with Paranoia and delusional thoughts? I started having these really strange paranoia in the last couple of months where I thought I was in hell or that somehow everybody was looking at me and reading my mind. The first time it happend I was on weed so I thouhgt it was only a bad trip, but every now or then these thoughts keep coming back and it's starting to worry me",5.2868,6.21650274666667,5.206666666666667,84.45000000000003,68.2,7.6,35.0,7.554174236665415,2.4722000000000004,306,15,58,3,5,95,56,75,0.18,0.82,0.0,-0.8906,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,6,2,1,0,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,15,13,9,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,2,0,1,7,1,8,0,8,6,0,16,1,0,1,0,1,5,1,3,9,44,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16939956507198844,0.1839439729445901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897717029324869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437613045621572,0.0,0.0,0.227122929442186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856149506418985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873897924499472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958156096906158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17957651442022354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849992062539753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22244343426366026,0.0,0.17584391530748994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755051358905707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22036282078706654,0.0,0.14113187341941796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118634828210869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5246884066825345,0.1284605696572643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22372859703940168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iSaturnrutaSi,2020/01/29,"Suicidal thoughts Don't know if this is the right place to post this but lately I've had really strong suicidal thoughts more than usual for no reason at all and have been zoning out alot, I've been scared to see people to the point where it's made me physically sick. I feel there is something wrong like there are a few wires in my brain that are damaged. Would just like to know if anyone else has felt this way before?",5.799176470588236,5.839822329411768,5.3388235294117665,87.06470588235297,66.88235294117646,8.682352941176473,25.235294117647058,8.238735603445708,1.1762235294117642,338,7,72,4,5,103,67,85,0.262,0.634,0.105,-0.9591,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,1,4,0,11,2,1,2,1,17,19,4,2,3,4,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,7,3,3,3,9,11,4,11,0,1,1,0,0,7,0,3,4,44,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131264556559735,0.1923506549593577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974364318679626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20956776919707998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568235800569145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949214771466712,0.0,0.18024938261122814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063420153749877,0.0,0.2117666096425881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18342991827005486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17763382017874782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301477255207971,0.0,0.1961369607504757,0.0,0.17746468556022887,0.0,0.17979259142367418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026407304670612,0.1930167882731228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031963167556718,0.0,0.0,0.18794958575199747,0.0,0.14959579293942354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452303821177828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4106903468638853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29807188288598296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20675708923327948,0.0,0.0,0.14901062709565469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335737142819126,0.20525230833651084,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soiusage,2020/01/29,Being unwell sucks. I have had depression for years but here I sit at the brink again. Nearly a year ago I started to have obsessive dark thoughts and my anxiety ran away and so did my depression which lead to being hospitalized for two months after a phychotic break. Since then I've sat here recovering and have more control of mind and have brand new life perspectives that have given me a reason to live. The man I love who has got me through this loves me so much yet I feel dulled and incapable of giving love at this time yet I know I love him. Now feel like my depression is worsening again and my thoughts are becoming louder. So I'm scared. Maybe if I acknowledge here I'm unwell it will help in some way. Because I've been told get a job or go back to the country I come from. How did people integrate back into society?,3.7846993006993017,5.423116430303036,4.592727272727274,84.74139860139861,72.57575757575758,8.713286713286713,26.025641025641022,9.265573868473778,2.079941724941725,661,22,134,15,13,213,109,165,0.16899999999999998,0.662,0.16899999999999998,0.5920000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,14,12,1,2,7,0,15,5,0,4,0,23,37,14,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,8,0,1,7,0,0,4,0,7,0,1,11,2,17,5,17,23,3,30,0,4,0,4,10,7,1,3,17,90,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568399673938918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846526555334496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321183276129905,0.21804808486580213,0.0,0.08643092250321588,0.15659057872916254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221353678463284,0.0,0.0,0.15902412232022506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3663580727088863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14338168237074864,0.10129135245793207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407689839250553,0.13601325289607907,0.08057977850136501,0.0,0.11339855129290392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503560950933043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069990158068882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792142041395257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014705735145893,0.06926907131367724,0.0,0.1251989011030714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5118665996795797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14244225863073715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316260142566178,0.0,0.1131715685096606,0.0,0.1042284126023894,0.0,0.0,0.13693699892067868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829598317914888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457787671468484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419516879428996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728615626298157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10035627178236707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22512317191172046,0.08267607175565359,0.0,0.0,0.13548180423930162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13850350709396814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254246692285327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18260999936132813
mentalhealth,is_this_real_88,2020/01/29,"Help on possible molestation case So I calmed down now. I made a rambling post earlier. I was molested a few times when I was 12/13 by a family friend. I’m 18 now. It left me with depression, anxiety and really low self confidence. I recently told my mom because my mental health got so bad. I guess she made a police report. I got a phone call today from the pd in the town that it happened in. I only told them that it did happen in that town and the individual doesn’t live there anymore. When asked about who it was I said I don’t recall. They knew the guys name from my mom and I said I didn’t know the name. He is the head of the board of a local college. Would it even be worth proceeding? It is most likely just going to be my word against his unless his sons testify against him and I’m not really sure if they saw anything or could even remember it. I also wouldn’t want it to be a big thing in the media since he’s the head of the board at a local college. I don’t really like the cops either since one killed a kid down the road from me and I’ve never met an understandable one. So basically should I proceed or just let it go and stick with therapy?",1.6814381520119248,3.4604429262295113,3.72725782414307,88.09412071535023,78.75409836065575,7.551117734724293,21.336810730253355,8.438071523408619,1.1213262295081972,910,25,201,19,22,310,140,244,0.105,0.818,0.077,-0.8304,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,3,0,14,11,3,0,22,0,18,3,2,2,2,34,40,16,1,6,8,3,0,2,1,3,1,2,0,3,14,8,0,0,4,0,1,2,7,6,0,2,16,3,28,5,23,16,3,29,0,2,1,0,28,16,0,5,12,134,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622029399062323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204488532099753,0.0,0.1193256465994664,0.0,0.0,0.0990135541159394,0.0,0.11248346471860884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046262680249188,0.07334628564647615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12286072605550412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606616223919012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363190654285664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158941166481261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342749877168785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295935230422064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676187364703854,0.0,0.19246265790386397,0.0,0.13254664210368658,0.1191362533781808,0.21279811590453465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469671771995988,0.12789510973548512,0.0,0.0,0.08064832307440617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311685278457885,0.0,0.0661250232455667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307286209685414,0.1230359061916102,0.0,0.11756507842086406,0.0,0.10624524298683866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277004121952051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12125480667254022,0.0,0.0,0.2818359292528648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279861953951933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16306462639900193,0.0915091940649439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356433326449656,0.1152338195947684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312412606235681,0.0,0.11880201967608905,0.0,0.13629971903187973,0.0,0.2289047771944608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12552056627225686,0.0,0.0,0.1990607914504628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11340068692796905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759702585030106,0.0,0.0799356217386646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701598756497491,0.0,0.11404980513255178,0.2299428682660664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12525792758485105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07096817308693115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547226089297706,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sjk20040111,2020/01/29,"I’m scared I won’t beat this My depression feels unbeatable. I take mood stabilizers as instructed and go to therapy once a week. I live life pretty moderately. I do some exercise and eat decently. My life consists of school, friends, and interests in fashion. I’ve been struggling it feels like my whole life with it. Now I’m having depression episodes of breaking anything and everything, screaming, crying, and intense thoughts of suicide. I don’t think I have any will to carry out the deed. I’m  petrified because I don’t know if I’ll ever feel content or comfortable. I try so hard every day to practice mindfulness and things to relax the mind, but it seems to pull me deeper. The pain I feel is intense. It feels like a thick sludge of the worst thoughts you can imagine. I’ll take advice, but it’s hard to do so. I’m considering partial hospitalization for 5 days. I’m afraid doing this will butcher my relationships with friends, family and school. I did a 72 hour hold about a year ago and it was extremely traumatic. I guess I’m posting this just to see if I get a response. My family and friends are just as hurt and confused as I am. I know they try to support me as much as I try to feel better.",3.5536075949367114,5.494687599156125,4.71504430379747,82.36421202531646,73.85232067510549,8.284303797468354,30.41540084388185,8.982922981607832,2.6624803375527417,959,44,186,21,20,315,135,237,0.174,0.695,0.131,-0.9165,0,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,1,1,3,7,21,0,4,9,0,17,6,0,0,1,40,42,22,1,2,7,0,9,2,3,3,5,1,0,0,10,13,1,1,13,2,0,2,3,10,0,0,5,11,24,10,24,34,4,15,0,3,1,0,6,3,0,7,10,109,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822962854811848,0.0981786448861349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531798041585305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114287492948964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751592142012841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795481472550133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166043075438507,0.14285710905195634,0.0,0.19078822048303007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333119239361725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001852791504214,0.09331683377593228,0.0,0.0995404865847448,0.0,0.20882208353024945,0.0,0.3360098256385875,0.15824843227454433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567097816931918,0.0,0.05786551741049796,0.0,0.06294527277719486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201038667326615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843151247154006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907249823893657,0.0,0.11856674995822457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12173736772085166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346910339067577,0.1082197213731114,0.0,0.09779971014941884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22366427820544216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141851447606398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179516857268684,0.0,0.0,0.11785235315520012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607377647180727,0.1126788227414433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189106564399462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088622834322756,0.2241822748441876,0.08825831240168518,0.10082823981971968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157863763726654,0.0,0.12114925233407738,0.12568476721051158,0.0,0.0,0.16654968299533096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665931073496198,0.0,0.07358146507908513,0.07096806918372776,0.0,0.17585602402978226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22558846815096556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884190332408262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365528684365827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132332972004549
mentalhealth,Twinkyboii,2020/01/29,"What is this called Hi r/mentalhealth

I've recently noticed that I start feeling anxious/sick/tired after spending time with people, whom I love. Staying overnight at my girlfriend is great, but if I stay two nights in a row I start feeling weird, like anxious and almost dizzy at times. I love my girlfriend to death and we have a great relationship, so I doubt it's anything to do with her, but I can't figure out what to call it/what it is called. I don't think the social anxiety title fits me well either cause I'm fine in social situations, albeit abit nervous with new people. Please help me find out what my problem is :/",6.463763066202091,6.369396723577237,6.324645760743322,81.01463414634149,65.5040650406504,8.654587688734031,32.20557491289199,7.957251820313856,2.195381881533101,499,18,96,5,7,157,82,123,0.184,0.5820000000000001,0.23399999999999999,0.81,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,0,0,2,11,0,2,3,0,8,2,0,1,0,21,16,6,1,2,4,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,5,0,1,0,2,4,1,1,0,2,15,7,13,16,1,17,0,0,0,2,15,7,0,3,9,56,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372137479992465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482604467265136,0.309605272277652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11276236817243028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41976272488452976,0.0,0.0,0.14076550174364333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857094771084985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12524110921159873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3021477067382107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918469797413454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694495907899131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473462392348103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13234249594067574,0.0,0.1285914951433612,0.0,0.0,0.15600728582075646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18999592305081267,0.0,0.0,0.15041559488332107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13111728963263564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529861847658775,0.147116790330345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154025212858442,0.0,0.279365578607291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19397824686770848,0.2921072309498557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780200922971725,0.0,0.0,0.15980425709565238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13385644471418934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12320462808951575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WeLoveTheNBDY,2020/01/29,"So I need help before I continue with this path I need mentall help ive been holding this pain in since I was 7 and I'm turnin 21 here soon these demons would make a lot of people run 
I don't care if y'all think it's for attention it's not I'm asking for help and this is the only way I know how.",-0.7524285714285703,0.8119720428571462,1.7957142857142865,99.99928571428572,85.71428571428572,5.142857142857143,15.714285714285715,6.1826913282559595,-0.8052857142857142,233,4,62,2,7,80,52,70,0.099,0.764,0.13699999999999998,0.3468,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,2,0,15,15,5,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,8,1,5,12,1,5,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,2,35,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352873691237181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21416163752586784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566051262551667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5060885653163235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831706546037936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21396983002879608,0.0,0.0,0.16799874234187198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25363483003442017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732359239848377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914144232313144,0.26780588329142035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17448362552498065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081927776372809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16126675407326166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19977233066010106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17878666387876316,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gbisswurm89,2020/01/29,"Sleep All Day, Up All Night! For the past few weeks I've had a reverse sleep schedule. I cant fall asleep at night til about 5 or 6 in the morning then sleep all day til about 3 or 4. I have an on call job so that has something to do with part of it. But just cant get back in a normal schedule. Any ideas?",0.08090476190476181,1.2346474714285731,1.7714285714285722,103.14190476190477,81.42857142857143,4.666666666666667,18.80952380952381,3.1291,-0.9876190476190478,233,5,64,0,6,76,53,70,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,1,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,0,6,4,4,0,3,10,7,7,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,13,6,5,18,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,12,40,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414658100329936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599602801181116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124193010312328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683210109913277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868576465084544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23483768723858875,0.0,0.0,0.20643516023806668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3904393682087133,0.20382274767210068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252734728921117,0.19858575451597654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6245331010218739,0.0,0.0,0.16014970616195034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686708471499195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fakejakegyllenhaal,2020/01/29,"I feel like I don’t exist I’m 18F in college and I was walking to class and to the dining hall to get food and just around campus as one does...and I realized that nothing really felt real. I feel so isolated from people that I feel like I’m looking at the world from behind a glass. Or maybe like I’m a ghost - like I could walk through people and they wouldn’t even notice. I feel sadness and emptiness at the same time - my brain just feels like it’s on autopilot...I’m diagnosed with depression, and I’m sure that’s part of it. I don’t know what’s wrong with me at this point.",0.6856472795497197,2.7749497723577257,2.394308943089431,94.74861163227017,83.79674796747966,5.7358348968105055,19.21763602251407,7.010146845296331,0.17794484052532855,454,12,103,6,13,149,76,123,0.14800000000000002,0.7290000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.6238,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,0,5,9,0,0,5,0,5,4,1,0,1,25,18,9,1,2,3,0,6,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,9,2,0,8,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,2,7,12,6,17,14,2,12,0,2,1,0,1,9,0,1,6,60,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575172545046425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827734588414288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072267194436116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14101780904123634,0.16617943954535294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081401269713048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4139264058329361,0.3508997643628364,0.15720357782166672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19797931562651566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554059012245724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998006706587412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39994366435339296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13748942855812926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16448575907008642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710045425282554,0.1864042533310354,0.0,0.0,0.11094563978423716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17730036561855034,0.0,0.2270153473019115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547749185207318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18635714906315212,0.1048876966592771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15431074220119775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547051942580698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790097517074406,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,somesazon,2020/01/29,"Haven’t moved out of my bed in 2 days I feel like I can’t do anything, I’ve barely moved, simple tasks seem so out of reach. I feel like I have very little support. I know that my major depression is making what i’m going through 10x worse but I can’t seem to stop my mind from getting to a dark place. All I want to do is shut the world out, sleep and cry. I’ve been eating literally 2 chicken tenders a day and even that makes me wanna throw up. I wake up in the middle of the night literally just wishing that life would just stop for a while. I don’t want to kill myself but I can’t say that existing seems great right now. I’ve felt this way for 10 days straight now and my mind won’t give me a break. 
I’ve written out positive things and things to look forward to but even then I feel hopeless in my future, in my relationships, in my self growth.
I don’t know how to stop feeling this way, i’ve had depression for as long as I could remember and every episode doesn’t get easier, I never get used to feeling this way. 
The worst parts are first thing in the mornings and from 5pm to 9pm, during these times I feel most hopeless, most depressed. I over think the most.
I was on medication from age 11 to age 19, I got off my meds almost a year ago. My meds made me feel a bit numb but the depression was still there. Now without it I feel like I can feel my emotions so much more deeply. Everything makes me feel like i’m drowning in my own emotions. My anxiety constantly makes my heart race, half the time I feel so light headed I just want to stay laying down.
I don’t want to get back on meds but based on how i’ve been, I feel like I was put on meds for a reason and me wanting to take control back of my body was a bad idea.
I just want to feel in control of myself.",2.7472090988626405,3.4767211312335964,3.943254593175855,91.92482064741907,73.90813648293964,7.114260717410325,23.82239720034995,7.242747475848597,0.6484197725284333,1385,37,327,14,27,453,181,381,0.155,0.718,0.127,-0.9725,0,0,0,0,0,3,31.0,0,0,0,3,18,18,1,0,16,0,25,10,5,11,2,75,71,21,2,10,10,0,14,5,0,2,4,1,1,1,13,11,1,5,23,0,0,7,11,10,0,2,11,17,47,8,52,57,11,66,0,6,1,0,4,29,0,7,32,197,60,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05999207083628678,0.0,0.06776929731673095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05177314585122216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0556928628963482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407972766899014,0.05650793318828533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388636389306254,0.07517450899624822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07313539620722567,0.15181226979430376,0.05403502227887679,0.0,0.07434061845378935,0.13093927629045582,0.0,0.23316232264606154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925103651536449,0.0,0.15225628491396878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940077621152201,0.0,0.057021260668208035,0.0,0.06082422434324919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44485748182493096,0.24174430116030554,0.06498106796293432,0.0,0.0,0.05756649539758514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143492094416685,0.06492247950496724,0.03846271526398056,0.0,0.054127924782679485,0.07461474549774222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945669844135607,0.0,0.0,0.08019823088089861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639972409450775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748751895386356,0.0,0.07438763079489005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047802659961015466,0.16531917908493626,0.06783069163023626,0.0,0.05989250824241549,0.056832102838370875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403814079323142,0.1807011792469352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3006980359849929,0.06817801862138083,0.0,0.0,0.136670079702259,0.0,0.0,0.1438610652006053,0.049750791462829305,0.0,0.05219710413518868,0.0,0.0,0.06351080262614257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328819908400462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707086426146578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803463743569496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958380026086038,0.0,0.0726603685822726,0.07666547911172555,0.057796263880538164,0.0,0.05381990969199731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18483331826115812,0.07060245186115814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772643290637619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07213527095957059,0.054047384430171874,0.16974440411733774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679968965022922,0.0,0.0,0.050885100276160236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488588492075346,0.04336504581543636,0.0,0.0,0.07892665545185787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05845167979937931,0.0,0.055841072279033344,0.23950785944558856,0.16115788380901286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782585054243914,0.06523874985342591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896921242225297,0.04807619471753888,0.0,0.0,0.043582127801899184
mentalhealth,Insanity13995,2020/01/29,"I'm up all night but still tired. Any suggestions what I can do during those hours? Hi! I suffer from anxiety and depression for about 6 years now. Insomnia is kicking me in the butt lately and luckily, I don't have to go anywhere during the day time. I can't seem to fall asleep before 4 or 5am. 

Do any of you have ideas what I can do during these hours? It shouldn't be something that requires too much energy, since I'm awake but not exactly energetic.

Thanks!",2.081052009456265,4.1977076489361735,3.672695035460993,87.33388888888891,78.8936170212766,7.582033096926714,22.14657210401891,8.515128840125781,1.392055791962175,365,11,76,8,9,121,71,94,0.222,0.7090000000000001,0.069,-0.9498,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,2,0,12,4,2,0,2,12,17,5,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,0,0,7,1,8,15,2,13,0,2,0,1,3,2,1,2,9,46,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.319209943639519,0.0,0.17954589660729048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997135692454072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513629596717829,0.0,0.20214793589530955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13338619055267026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4622671216519254,0.0,0.0,0.26494926544576963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647533549066813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725325033519314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202513255525933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21366330172702155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941473888293116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18068457200336546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18743280782434912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160814774967739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685624937724342,0.2697546852715664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511399796862217
mentalhealth,DeathOfAFruitFly,2020/01/29,16kms run. I've been struggling with booze and liquor since I was a kid. My #bellletstalk is I smoked 2 half joints of weed and have had about 10 shots of CC BUT THIS COMES AFTER I RAN MY  EVERY OTHER DAY 15-16KMS RUN. BEEN STRUGGLING TO QUIT ALL SINCE FOREVER.,1.1157232704402524,3.4815719245283065,1.8814150943396264,97.30690251572331,84.47169811320755,5.042767295597487,16.38050314465409,6.42735559955562,-0.5271232704402515,204,4,46,2,6,63,42,53,0.132,0.868,0.0,-0.7717,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,1,0,6,2,0,0,1,6,8,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,2,0,1,5,0,5,0,6,3,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,25,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27094551465937466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20285014947401736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650107342296196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345484957993527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5203760144412369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6576441007414706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tdog0123,2020/01/29,"had a breakdown at work, boss’s solution is to tell me to not show my stress so obviously, and other colleagues seem to agree. I don’t know what to do. 

I’ve been having a really hard time lately. I don’t know how to explain myself.

Two months ago I started a new position (1 year fixed term) at my current workplace. Since then, I’ve worked three 6-day weeks, one of them resulting in me working 7 days in a row (Tuesday to next Monday), and I feel like it’s really worn me. I used to be adored by everyone in the team who thought I was so ‘helpful and sweet’, but lately I’ve been so short tempered and impatient, with spontaneous bursts of rage that I can’t really control.

My boss is a very efficient person and an excellent businessman. He’s nice to people upfront, and behind their backs he will talk bad about them. Recently I heard from a trusted colleague that he has also been talking bad about me for something I didn’t even think I was wrong to do. I don’t feel like I’m valued and appreciated at my work, a few empty words of ‘thank you so much’ isn’t really that inspiring when he goes on his phone and talks to his friends while the rest of the team are dying away under all the busyness. I understand that he’s the ‘boss’ and we’re getting paid to work, but he’s expecting everything to be done when he’s not setting an example? He’s not inspiring the staff to work any harder. Is it really called delegating efficiently if you’re playing on your phone while other people are working???

Yesterday was supposed to be my day off, but my colleague asked me a few weeks in advance to cover for half a day since he needed to attend some important family matters and I had agreed. Which is fine. But yesterday morning was so busy. After it finally died down a bit I received a message from my manager saying he needed a certain thing done NOW. And I just exploded. Couldn’t really remember what I actually did but apparently I threw something, cried, and my colleague had to sit me down in the staff room where I sobbed for another 10 minutes.

Later last night, my boss called me to ask how I was doing. But his main message was to tell me to find a way to manage my stress better because it’s very obvious when I’m stressed and this affects the team, that while the team can ‘help me manage’ they still need to work, so I need to be professional so everyone can work well. I don’t really know what to think about this. If your employee breaks down due to overworking and the stress of everything, is this the advice they should get? I guess it is good advice, and I do need to find a way of managing my stress, but I’m honestly so overworked and whose fault is that? I asked my close colleague friends and one of them said ‘at least you got tomorrow off’, and another said he agreed with the manager, that ‘while the current employer may be willing to help you, other employers may not be so willing’. WHAT AM I BEING HELPED WITH??? He just wants me to do homework on controlling my emotions so everything goes smoothly at work. He gave me no recommendations on what to do, just told me ‘we need to work on this’. What’s ‘we’? I’ve never felt a ‘we’ from him. I feel like he honestly doesn’t care about my wellbeing, it’s never his fault, and everything just has to be perfect for him. 

They’re all trying to tell me to change. Stop saying yes to working on your day off, learn to meditate, find a hobby, don’t stress so much. I made a list of things I’m stressed about today and there’s 23 things. These are the people I’m working with. Are they that annoyed with me that they want me to change everything? Is it unacceptable then for me to accept my current self? They’re all telling me to improve, but it’s not for my wellbeing, it’s for their own convenience so they don’t have to work with the me in a bad mood. But we’ve worked together for years and they know I wasn’t like this before, I was nice before, I was patient and kind all the time. I thought we were colleagues who became friends. And now that I’m not, now that I’m really going through a tough time, they just tell me to go meditate. 

I don’t know what to think anymore.",5.189748877864397,5.454284466265063,5.940673281360737,81.45757736829674,68.19277108433735,9.642334042050557,30.370895346090244,9.578458609240784,2.558001653673517,3257,117,668,65,51,1068,317,830,0.08199999999999999,0.7509999999999999,0.16699999999999998,0.9973,7,0,2,0,0,0,86.0,4,6,12,25,37,47,3,7,37,1,70,0,0,12,10,122,124,58,2,13,22,0,6,4,3,6,0,5,2,2,43,34,0,3,26,6,1,6,22,18,1,5,33,12,96,28,100,76,15,93,0,1,0,0,84,29,1,7,57,445,139,37,0.0,0.0,0.04515943426342147,0.0,0.0,0.09044221256059162,0.04102154829883235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03700750170195041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03146977812723668,0.09705041843112587,0.0,0.0,0.045894102859906284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297875481160198,0.0,0.04347853166162897,0.035583965647343035,0.11591746433672105,0.028209878377197888,0.0,0.07875621469046733,0.0,0.0,0.04092802633429705,0.05052222740127648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450747529507693,0.0,0.047182232652627575,0.0,0.09790933467021937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380662429068196,0.0,0.0,0.0508328388728103,0.14922338268171562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605592444076988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471436809035312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05205511710408674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030565358123092294,0.0,0.0,0.08843883899935995,0.20795280291661675,0.0,0.04362560307964017,0.0,0.07019674852561611,0.0991803622156352,0.04443293889996693,0.050693919616484985,0.12688833833684549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725991095846901,0.0,0.04835538563492423,0.0,0.05260028900190148,0.03881474383137546,0.03701174588301116,0.0,0.05097905940422517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041454879940042766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407332506077708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048190115750151585,0.12716246276176907,0.03772172919973736,0.10440438342689924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043393361849524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04378818148627797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03693766178760221,0.0,0.06803747450115219,0.20588175057258573,0.07138296773198552,0.04469437526536979,0.04921585054667305,0.0434275966991636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271664935441841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624741875274002,0.04040707470167965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23716857753997464,0.0,0.045692709541985614,0.0,0.052422538685437885,0.0,0.08803957647888827,0.07360226090190801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04212861681323735,0.048276744720848634,0.0,0.0,0.07656121461354602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125220883948273,0.0,0.0,0.03275492311521095,0.0,0.036956673772408216,0.038689436647707465,0.3710690399069221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115865005144764,0.20223960405528035,0.04260541558760576,0.0,0.0,0.09223265284852618,0.08895682195669506,0.0,0.07347714354526708,0.08095303838199908,0.0,0.04386494971592306,0.04421941949967997,0.0,0.03141887679222224,0.0,0.04520566224189995,0.048175730669986185,0.0,0.03996825534796846,0.0,0.07636633347110301,0.0545904544119322,0.07346466316023369,0.07424083786032634,0.0,0.041608357490337186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5053503970509421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05059636345642193,0.0,0.059601421843572026
mentalhealth,Sky1226,2020/01/29,"What to look for in UK I did a couple sessions of cognitive behavioural therapy about 7 years ago while I was going through a bad depression. While it helped me understand physically why I’d become depressed, it didn’t help me with my emotional/personality issues. It was very clinical and didn’t dive deep at all. 

I’m now suffering with a bunch of mental issues. I’m a sexual abuse survivor, I’ve never spoken to anyone about that, and I’ve never dealt with it. I have anxiety that comes and goes, where I feel like I don’t fit in anywhere. I find meeting new people extremely stressful to the point it makes me physically ill. Whenever I’m in social situations I feel like I don’t belong and end up saying almost nothing the whole time, and go home physically exhausted. I don’t go out much because being around people is very hard for me. I’m lucky enough to be financially supported by my husband, but I want to have a career of my own. I don’t see how I can do that without a lot of help. 

What kind of therapy should I be looking for? I know it’s not like the movies where you lie on a sofa and talk about your childhood, but I want something like that, where they get to know me and help me work through each individual issue in detail. Is there an option on NHS that could help me?",5.788738738738741,5.68722118146718,6.907706563706565,76.29157271557274,66.9150579150579,10.14990990990991,31.16628056628057,9.888512548439397,2.8333380180180177,1022,36,202,21,15,346,146,259,0.08,0.7879999999999999,0.131,0.9147,0,0,1,0,1,0,23.0,0,2,1,1,10,13,0,1,11,0,20,3,0,2,3,37,41,12,0,4,4,1,3,4,0,1,3,1,2,0,13,14,0,0,6,0,0,4,10,6,0,0,5,7,28,7,34,31,8,31,0,3,3,0,13,16,0,4,15,134,41,3,0.0,0.12755974663604072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543428220039114,0.0,0.10780615095445537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235976759413638,0.0,0.0,0.07527852354010285,0.0,0.0,0.09584041407875972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989178015154943,0.06562866604342303,0.11890224585512404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273973985617326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859579189879809,0.1191239769826922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18545516588872066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953549926958854,0.1112417785104626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887247615231573,0.15382495410253058,0.0,0.0,0.09839948345003438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05624801732219666,0.0,0.18355733873796093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644240344029108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36081185402648797,0.0,0.10799197083520123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33710787136142906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211154372494486,0.1183344740485949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21038936606116776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18081492652986209,0.0,0.0,0.0915288623802451,0.0,0.0,0.07186402758647822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849617186653387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791426434522182,0.0,0.16606838525959858,0.1039789037403762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330287714274254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14927607080056934,0.09400474457669718,0.0,0.0,0.10177369931085084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561572184367604,0.0,0.0,0.08579125024633752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101458921084572,0.0,0.10974602828785704,0.0,0.08288209109335294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332440923951253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12217153288446285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653320040706307,0.0,0.0,0.2462376704833588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277753546865109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207807765998848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17766190017985906,0.12700156497857534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714659596504256,0.12019878206604342,0.0,0.10378060262168363,0.0,0.07837791665153065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932964682766392
mentalhealth,GreatGuyEasyPie,2020/01/29,"Anxiety and IBS? Ever since I was about 11 years old. I've had stomach / gut issues. I've been to the doctors various times and they always tell me there isn't anything wrong with me. To change my diet, eat more fibre. Exercise more. Which I tried all possible combinations. But I find that when I'm put in anxiety inducing situations, I tend to worry that my stomach may act funny and I might shit myself. I have on occasion had what I assume were panic attacks in toilet stalls and missed the start of meetings and lectures in Uni. But usually as I progress with the day, I'm fine. If I start work later in the day when I've been awake for a while, I'm fine.

I'm nearly 30 now and just managed to deal with it most my life up to now. It's either some autoimmune disorder that I'd have to spend thousands and got private for to ever figure out. Or some mental disorder. Any suggestions?",2.6285112359550564,4.6296418932584285,4.327401685393259,83.85211376404493,76.69662921348315,7.596067415730338,25.16994382022472,8.472884824447931,1.8118415730337067,699,25,137,14,16,235,115,178,0.134,0.8,0.066,-0.9043,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,2,9,7,2,1,5,0,11,9,4,1,3,29,20,15,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,7,11,2,0,4,1,1,2,1,5,0,1,7,0,16,2,23,11,8,26,0,1,0,0,5,8,1,8,16,91,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301833395922498,0.0,0.0,0.10639496631804764,0.0,0.2393757463100703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128749377701211,0.0,0.0,0.1779904857485179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550895786971906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20180144531168795,0.16129854018233492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3586226475905577,0.16013862497033074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16009282685127765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28304554481999145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299730605999406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12513159262431986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16329868059650035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050900245329087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767013962643964,0.16597434456404367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417351447257408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18356657960570455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17637983832908685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15728078565965764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16059911295659218,0.12942143756372762,0.17586230785342308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22147972747077765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13674882469548727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123034124118354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622287594605616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17231340463718506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390131881591413,0.15888794754509056,0.0,0.0,0.17105930534358044,0.0,0.10075208099523096
mentalhealth,bubaroni_pizza,2020/01/29,How can I deal with PTSD nightmares? I’ve started to process some trauma in therapy and I’m having nightmares and don’t know how to deal with them and how to not have them ruin my entire next day. Any advice would be appreciated,3.16,5.145793043478268,4.286304347826088,84.81467391304348,75.08695652173913,6.339130434782609,24.54347826086957,7.1686216300943375,1.0217130434782602,184,6,36,2,4,60,34,46,0.057999999999999996,0.81,0.132,0.5532,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,3,0,12,9,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,6,7,1,4,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,24,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920212059113422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20322020654506465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19272590055972086,0.6161780728100336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423364564404033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178177892754073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3493258345891897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21151919832189095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.341747497029232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21228606537893796,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,psycheresearcher,2020/01/29,"Participants needed for research survey - attitudes towards the therapeutic use of psychedelics to treat mental illness Hi there,

I'm a senior year medical student at the University of Wollongong, Australia. As part of my course I'm conducting a research project into public attitudes towards the therapeutic use of psychedelics to treat mental illness. The survey is entirely anonymous and should take about 5 minutes to complete. You must be over 18 to complete the survey. If you would like to participate please follow the link [https://uow.au1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_8c9LHjDEm749Gzr](https://uow.au1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_8c9LHjDEm749Gzr)

You can find more information about the project, including contact details, here [https://documentcloud.adobe.com/link/track?uri=urn%3Aaaid%3Ascds%3AUS%3A8330fe13-48de-479e-af65-35ccbb77f514](https://documentcloud.adobe.com/link/track?uri=urn%3Aaaid%3Ascds%3AUS%3A8330fe13-48de-479e-af65-35ccbb77f514)",22.013107476635515,27.871881467289725,10.910362149532714,40.66311331775702,33.39252336448598,11.331308411214955,46.08528037383178,11.20814326018867,6.480271962616824,835,35,66,16,8,193,73,107,0.051,0.8490000000000001,0.1,0.6322,0,0,0,0,0,0,70.0,0,3,0,0,4,3,0,0,9,0,6,3,0,2,1,12,13,3,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,18,9,2,8,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,3,43,4,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4950248210580957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21576152998860335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153307159832302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237813293818803,0.4758012790121336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17504115067828172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255638230248445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591313594271944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749347293555393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40777326133596736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16769566571807926,0.0,0.0,0.1520198089322497
mentalhealth,whattheflyingfuck2,2020/01/29,"Ways to feel better Depressed, lonely, hopeless, seeking help advice. Healthy coping strategies that work. I must’ve tried everything in the book.",6.772463768115943,10.761823347826088,4.330434782608695,77.67072463768119,76.3913043478261,4.8057971014492775,33.7536231884058,6.42735559955562,2.6412144927536234,119,6,14,1,3,33,23,23,0.27399999999999997,0.467,0.259,-0.128,0,2,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,2,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4124741562058493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3733157924702484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635566864334465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3793589496993247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21342795432018566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28292673638325744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865802223740431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350457058717286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30729600365497695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TrumpStolePutinsHair,2020/01/29,"How do I force myself to see a doctor? Ive been depressed for almost a year now (if not much longer). I just cant get myself to see a doctor. I think Im too afraid. Id rather kill myself than visit a doctor. I dont know why I have this fear, but its there and its going to kill me soon if I dont get help. 

I really need to go because im scared that ill kill myself, and i dont want that",0.2869230769230775,0.9196930769230818,3.0953846153846136,96.0246153846154,79.76923076923076,5.639560439560442,15.197802197802195,5.288315135182226,-1.0065648351648346,294,2,78,1,7,105,54,91,0.342,0.6579999999999999,0.0,-0.9864,0,0,0,0,0,3,10.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,3,3,4,0,8,4,0,1,0,14,18,6,3,5,6,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,3,5,7,0,0,1,2,14,0,6,17,1,6,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,3,3,50,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018768616965172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534142771607818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057999642864632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42988138532604375,0.0,0.0,0.4922295304948989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15753657268931698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462862615948605,0.0,0.15912807923798253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383764935624962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024435373543243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4646608414963172,0.0,0.07693919115052884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291457365548108,0.10380667780990284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968624725183638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14016233270336212,0.0,0.2231204204798405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970500911488882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257439569377074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632634026003606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015406528923728
mentalhealth,create_freely,2020/01/29,"Mental Abuse in the workplace I wanted to share my story about a toxic workplace. I hope we can change the actions of people and businesses in the creative field. I was constantly being undermined and put down in a large corporation (30K employees). Being told to change my personality and that I didn’t belong there, even tho I was a top performer in my department, and open to help and teach others what I have learned in my 20 years experience. In the end I was let go for no reason, which resulted in me lawyering up (I won that battle). But after all was said and done, I was drained and battered. I looked towards Therapy and began the healing process. I hope that no one else  goes through what I did. The first photo I took (btw I am a photographer) I shared on Instagram today for the first time with my story. I hope others find solitude in know others are going through the same thing. Thanks for listening. #mentalhealth #bellletstalk


https://www.instagram.com/p/B75xYrNgkhN/?igshid=11d9nopz63998",4.921129837702871,7.9308163314606785,4.640823970037456,79.40339575530591,73.8876404494382,7.551061173533085,27.304619225967546,8.515128840125781,2.333253682896381,809,31,133,16,18,247,112,178,0.07400000000000001,0.7759999999999999,0.149,0.9136,1,0,0,0,1,0,33.0,1,0,0,5,4,8,1,0,12,0,15,1,0,2,1,23,30,10,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,10,11,0,0,4,0,0,6,3,1,0,3,13,3,23,7,24,14,2,29,0,0,1,0,8,14,0,3,9,103,33,3,0.0,0.1877895825038347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33533146866292995,0.0,0.0,0.17127580796845945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16219448463313876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324014767921871,0.0,0.14037872244375546,0.0,0.0,0.10468385332356374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550376351275701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14486072921106025,0.26962998828082835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18015169056671387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623524931167394,0.0,0.0,0.472261187755969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871042082766175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207094791660273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330951199691026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597247670631865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739969895859172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987984749387816,0.13839092819622986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593303393560967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16295832427605386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15076417677929366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459200660499629,0.1812518077067185,0.0,0.10529643246836007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241917993075416,0.0,0.15023386749190235,0.15144789752881554,0.17609276855628533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348392221532466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206499915724056
mentalhealth,escapemydemons5678,2020/01/29,"Has anyone else felt this? I'm not looking for help or advice, I just wanna know if i'm alone in this.  


It's the feeling of looking in the mirror and expecting to see someone else. not like one specific gender, but another person that i'm logically not. it can be a boy, girl, or young child, none of which are versions of me, they're different people and I get clear images in my head of what they should look like when i see my reflection. i just wanna know if i'm alone in this or not",2.4920588235294123,3.783952274509808,4.306029411764708,86.89963235294121,75.27450980392156,7.452941176470588,23.534313725490197,8.07648339933343,1.164937254901961,380,11,82,6,8,129,65,102,0.1,0.853,0.047,-0.4937,1,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,5,1,1,0,1,25,19,9,0,6,12,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,4,8,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,7,8,2,12,16,2,6,0,0,5,0,6,4,0,5,4,53,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18404954702779788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3901393408373852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974972199971367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316959136698546,0.19298275112322294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967814993433324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3146778567171604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523340486839127,0.0,0.18084171198651267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840301967955382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19329735027178185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126244364380018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20702008947039605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18403269941317668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4744896519220165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762813489385552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057541253883645,0.1644564763512434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001747790670104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595849681746949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,buttmunchi3s,2020/01/29,"Loneliness & heartache I’m a chronic dater. Dated a lot of snowflakes just to realize I’m one of them. Are we all damaged goods? Basically. Filling voids. We all tore the world & each other apart. 

Hopeless romantic in me still thinks I can find love again. One day.",1.0745098039215684,3.534936058823529,1.8905882352941177,91.60098039215687,100.17647058823529,5.403921568627451,25.27450980392157,6.937597516519254,1.5044274509803923,213,10,41,4,9,66,42,51,0.154,0.7240000000000001,0.122,-0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,2,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,2,2,0,0,2,10,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,5,2,4,6,4,8,0,2,0,1,4,3,0,1,4,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6512154117124895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19380721217872934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27466512138950305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25205759171924186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25548697223678724,0.2712263778735939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4072732687777386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239991541087978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19255777655703746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MadMage1010,2020/01/29,"Personality disorder relating to health/attention? Hello all,

I’m looking for a bit of information regarding personality disorders relating to having serious hypochondriatic tendencies for seeming attention. 

A family member (F24), from a very young age, has pretended to have dramatic illnesses (cancer, brain tumours she’s had surgery for, broken ribs etc). She’s told teachers and friends at school, having them believe she’s very sick when in fact, she is not. Obviously at a younger age (although not young enough for it to be seemingly innocent or to fit in, we’re talking 15 here) we thought it was a stage or a phase she’d grow out of. She’s always lied and been quite aggressive verbally about being right and has always given off this impression about being better but we though this was just an ugly personality trait she’d grow out of.

Since then she’s dropped out of university 3 times (biomedical science, geography and now nursing) due to illness or grief from friends and family dying (not true, I’m very lucky no family has died recently). She has also gone travelling abroad alone where she kept a blog about how much she hated the normalcy of her family and how she’d never go back because she hated us all because we treated her so badly (not true). The love of her life and 3 friends apparently died while she was travelling, all 4 of which the family have never heard of.

Recently she’s told us all that she’s having issues with her heart and has gone into hospital for major surgery and could die. Im not sure what to think anymore as she’s cried wolf so many times. She’s been in hospital for 3 weeks until yesterday when she discharged herself after the consultant (bless his heart) straight up told her it was all in her head and she was in all cases, fine. I’m hoping that the hospital trip was to, in fact eliminate all physical reasons for her to be there leaving only her mental heath to be the reason for her supposed illness. 

I’d really appreciate any information as to what area of mental health this would fall into and in what way I can help. I’m not sure if it’s my place to say anything at all but if I can help in other ways I’d like to be prepared to know how I and other family members could help.

Thank you",6.916401869158883,7.1718364158878485,7.546145794392526,71.45305981308412,64.51401869158879,11.333981308411214,34.17607476635514,11.044913438933486,3.9095901682242995,1798,73,322,48,25,597,216,428,0.153,0.718,0.129,-0.9336,1,1,0,0,0,0,43.0,5,1,1,2,18,23,3,0,14,0,34,13,5,5,17,71,58,34,5,6,14,0,0,1,3,1,7,2,0,3,15,21,0,1,10,4,0,9,9,6,0,0,18,3,42,17,59,28,13,58,1,1,1,1,58,24,0,9,22,218,57,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920659763007676,0.0,0.061158235392824126,0.12726916123911286,0.0,0.0,0.052006647570161546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584414555875582,0.0,0.0,0.062933649426314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058805713630641465,0.06385468931083281,0.09323873824774727,0.0,0.0,0.08616283522404397,0.0,0.06763725605894448,0.08349253891446044,0.0,0.0,0.08537307463505013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212053652802532,0.0,0.08400585239465075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174821626780778,0.0,0.17529740634690796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902067567462265,0.08529152147979874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4325714700419127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17725667988730184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04346336159648579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100943629094812,0.0784869601362176,0.1625819024738402,0.0,0.18125005914177947,0.1537817727028059,0.0,0.0,0.07595842779994091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260775150117948,0.07982160457730207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04202948847155294,0.0,0.0,0.08097757907380343,0.0,0.0,0.05401761890443426,0.03736255857179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422100517344351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690230338330489,0.0,0.0,0.07753517511116205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15414066412462354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05621903248950515,0.0,0.11796679437458635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05816383009364792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20032900945679166,0.07990167311031132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134217937274538,0.0,0.0,0.0489928089775869,0.15726117364509867,0.1510226498622261,0.0,0.0,0.06531051951805883,0.0,0.06081718828166275,0.0,0.07739830844458462,0.0,0.13924268028621167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326215726484719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14415640645464134,0.0,0.0,0.06146891982503256,0.0,0.0704092931347096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049003058000160124,0.07513778029593655,0.06071380442167131,0.08918813302600744,0.0,0.0,0.2192297406463081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839836443626036,0.0,0.0,0.18930338378933886,0.0,0.12140698388109004,0.061344841299879375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05432671668784316,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Curiouslywastingtime,2020/01/29,"Carrying on conversations in mind I find that when something stresses me, I carry out conversations in my head related to it eg. Work related mistakes.

Do others do this?

Any advice for quieting the mind?",4.526666666666664,7.697708333333335,6.27555555555556,66.10000000000002,76.77777777777777,10.266666666666667,34.0,10.125756701596842,4.917300000000001,164,9,24,6,4,56,30,36,0.155,0.845,0.0,-0.7059,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,5,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,6,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,18,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118507778994221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170197855946124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916796327467133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275201163035075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6444619655667522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456823658394965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3655630815780855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323309141757795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rebmucucc,2020/01/29,"How important is it to find an experienced therapist (versus one who recently graduated school)? Unfortunately, the therapy options in my area are a bit slim, but I found a guy who does have a PhD, but he only graduated in 2019. 

I read somewhere that it’s important to find an experienced therapist, but if we end up being a good fit, how much of a difference does it really make?",10.195,7.465771833333335,11.633888888888896,54.40000000000003,59.83333333333334,16.822222222222226,43.444444444444436,15.021129683784007,6.700994444444442,300,14,54,13,3,109,52,72,0.024,0.8220000000000001,0.154,0.8541,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,8,0,4,0,0,3,0,13,6,6,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,4,1,6,4,2,7,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,2,2,36,10,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22059815395883806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21111061917060056,0.0,0.0,0.3536496856169831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17896596995084532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3693599779187532,0.0,0.0,0.2215493318235585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16947908427668187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20007204488729569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348772102852182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485380004702294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692168557990872,0.15367640884630004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20211556632321132,0.0,0.1294453774939861,0.0,0.19951074789875034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044964039230457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23107423266780086,0.4692165244590279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MAKAMAKAMAKAMAKAMAKA,2020/01/29,"Amazing video from a channel that supports mental health awareness! This video is short and sweet and calmed me very much.

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaSpr33jdIU&t=4s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XaSpr33jdIU&t=4s)",26.339393939393936,35.221353545454555,9.260909090909092,41.728030303030316,36.27272727272727,4.751515151515153,30.06060606060606,6.42735559955562,1.8002242424242432,206,5,16,1,3,41,20,22,0.0,0.575,0.425,0.9109,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7086738593576206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476176575356393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32956937874811043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404047201510174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3711098327318623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26983404604133115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheJoblessCoder,2020/01/29,"""Mental Illness Is A Joke!"" ""Mental Illness is a Joke!"" was what my former boss said to me the last time I ever saw him; minutes before proceeding to permanently ban me from the office because a half dozen self aggrandizing jackasses made formal complaints to building management about the fact that I wear latex gloves to work to cope with my severe and crippling OCD. That began a long train of deterioration in my mental health and my inability to find new work that eventually led me to become homeless and end up on the street because of my mental health. All the while getting blamed for every little thing I ever did even if I had no control over it. But mental illness is fake right? Because everyone has anxiety and depression. Well according to the DSM 5 everyone IS mentally ill because that 970 page document can be used to classify every single human emotion under the sun as a mental disorder. No wonder my boss joked about my mental health before proceeding to destroy my entire life.

​

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qFNx7LbI1Kw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qFNx7LbI1Kw)",11.977814207650276,11.757774868852465,10.26568306010929,57.67863387978144,54.40983606557378,12.286338797814205,40.005464480874316,11.429527900616536,4.923093989071037,903,36,121,19,9,278,119,183,0.239,0.74,0.021,-0.9919,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,3,6,7,1,0,12,0,10,9,1,6,4,20,17,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,2,7,5,0,2,2,3,0,1,2,3,1,2,7,2,16,4,23,9,3,21,0,1,1,0,4,8,0,2,12,85,23,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849084234597462,0.1104542685349066,0.0,0.0,0.06953876683559776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22164882874437936,0.10039265277549247,0.15469955691649553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195283537864973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829261735380981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418004771653598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022510234003569,0.08051101645120946,0.0,0.0,0.06003903789968105,0.16444972766452812,0.15317547678763496,0.1737189790187602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308156926929405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047491850399677085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289869497396622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409618169510293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420583432775794,0.0,0.0911063558534175,0.0,0.08044423604925935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601241566433768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7328519949363224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779243742715304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762867895852515,0.08646735705828981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482922772556797,0.10269188781862128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06039036870498971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05300491403740674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850899662150057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173062269532137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857790343476967,0.13235354664790824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104542685349066,0.0
mentalhealth,boba_fett_helmet,2020/01/29,"Rant: 30 year-old sibling has a mental illness that we can't treat because they wouldn't give consent and now is, literally, physically unable to give consent. 
Rant:

My sibling has had mental health issues their entire life. They've been treated for anxiety before. But in the last five years, their mental health has declined rapidly. We have no official diagnosis because we can't get them to go see anyone. But the symptoms bear strong resemblance to bipolar disorder and schizophrenia.

We've had only minor success in getting them treatment before things started to get this bad.

You can't admit someone without there will. That is generally a good thing. The only exceptions are when they are a danger to other or themselves. WE'RE AT THAT POINT AND THINGS AREN'T GETTING EASIER.

They've been to jail for assault and were court ordered to see a medical professional. They have not done this.

Now, my sibling hasn't had anything to eat or drink in a week. Their RESTING heart rate was 180. They can't form sentences and can barely move. HOW CAN WE STILL BE TRYING TO GET CONSENT? HOW BAD DOES IT HAVE TO GET?

I'm afraid my sibling is not going to get treated and will die.",3.9201417848206814,6.674696844036702,4.242435362802336,82.29562135112593,75.97247706422019,6.165471226021682,28.7164303586322,7.348242739294969,1.916249541284404,944,41,158,12,22,295,127,218,0.18899999999999997,0.758,0.053,-0.981,0,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,4,1,9,2,7,11,2,1,8,0,31,10,1,2,0,23,47,13,1,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,0,10,10,2,0,1,1,0,3,11,5,0,1,8,2,17,6,19,35,2,17,0,0,2,0,17,5,0,2,8,108,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072714235956243,0.0,0.0,0.08292647637736697,0.0,0.09759604554316063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980487457165859,0.14459247520785232,0.0,0.20183631896301046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230859956887995,0.0,0.1359235783192749,0.0,0.10378590555920518,0.12136692630161662,0.0,0.11618088539817276,0.0,0.12135535797905192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4337379058823592,0.2275400091510527,0.13480394849169106,0.09947437224106832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521282478129436,0.0,0.14053919634370807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378549514716752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667319584261393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376927196797769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947500387614365,0.3585566564093869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260509007889995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444864652184935,0.0,0.0,0.180398240449435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121134405252044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890144958315416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048769718624108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394427202315521,0.0,0.094712512843035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326872825529075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363737161861465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08052025433952284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513215870868727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143242360107027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527464421334641
mentalhealth,Slight-Analysis,2020/01/29,"Psychological diagnosis with no money? I'm a jobless adult living with parents because of issues with anxiety(and autism? maybe? that's what I'm trying to figure out).   


Is there any way whatsoever to get a psych diagnosis/therapy in the US for someone with no income or insurance whatsoever?   


I posted something like this before and I would like compassionate responses. I know I need a job, I know that you can have a job with anxiety. You're not telling me anything I haven't told myself a thousand times.  


My upbringing/mental health has made it difficult to do certain things that I would be like to do at this point, but there's no use being ashamed or crying about it. I want practical tips on how to get professional help, because I don't think I'm the type of person who can ""push through it"". Maybe I could work for a while to get what I need, but eventually I would break down and give up again. I just know it.",4.7324459809853066,6.152322910112367,5.726404494382024,78.39461106309423,69.89887640449439,9.072428694900607,29.422644770959376,9.466822959209583,2.621994295592049,730,28,140,16,13,241,110,178,0.11,0.807,0.083,-0.755,5,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,1,1,0,1,7,7,0,1,8,0,15,1,0,3,1,30,32,8,0,7,6,1,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,2,13,8,0,0,5,0,1,1,6,2,0,1,2,0,18,5,23,24,0,14,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,2,6,94,31,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996836376349602,0.0,0.11213803612870524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062794657153901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17871516491214726,0.0,0.12473405333466572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170371469784087,0.0,0.16101804943352754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22975570656273664,0.14061883303777034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15581426807352255,0.0,0.0,0.09825363500750832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529979008047056,0.29092835510554804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416798137081693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148438280756724,0.0,0.1294382936652244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870339976099752,0.0,0.0,0.29453106601637563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21738360887866645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16276661959594232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279934093009981,0.0,0.0,0.13857133286865544,0.0,0.14038905236181567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12420200531504365,0.11284921263074033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812279339609448,0.0,0.1676340863720273,0.0,0.09738535288778327,0.09392651333856636,0.0,0.0,0.08547558773048149,0.0,0.0,0.1400693888597634,0.0,0.0995224026172171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632514103758248,0.12660340555627214,0.0,0.0,0.08646033432337863,0.11635329667451627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671649405902088,0.0,0.0,0.3123918764174601,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QuestioningsAndMore,2020/01/29,"What is the diagnostic criteria for trauma? What is trauma, and what isn't?  I've  been seeing my psychologist for a long time.  While I won't go into my  history, one point of confusion/contention I've had is what the  requirements for PTSD are.  According to my therapist, in order for  something to qualify as traumatic it has to be **overt sexual assault**  (Meaning along the lines of penetrative sex, not groping or harassment),  **physical bodily injury** (Things that cause bruises, scars, or broken  bones), or cause a **genuine fear for your life**.   She's also told me that  things such as harassment, inappropriate touching not involving the  genitals, sexual remarks, emotional abuse, severe neglect, and verbal  abuse do not qualify as traumatic events.  She did acknowledge they can  cause problems such as depression or anxiety, but stated they don't meet  the criteria for trauma or PTSD.

I  am unsure if this is correct or not, but am willing to accept this if  it's backed by modern research.  Is the diagnostic criteria for  trauma/PTSD this narrow and exclusive, or is my psychologist being  overly restrictive in what qualifies?",5.063841433480611,8.304416984536081,6.260279823269514,66.63359106529211,75.03092783505154,10.499361806578301,31.91850760922926,10.290406445055957,4.745228080510555,901,44,128,33,21,300,115,194,0.177,0.7859999999999999,0.037000000000000005,-0.9738,0,0,1,0,2,0,43.0,0,1,2,1,4,11,3,1,8,0,21,3,1,3,1,31,25,20,0,3,15,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,14,5,0,3,3,0,0,1,7,10,0,1,4,2,12,1,23,17,0,15,0,2,1,1,8,6,0,9,6,102,26,5,0.0,0.35550494567058144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997317001191768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147670228114211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535826424300152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4623441893698202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921440817398575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16875544489915512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16881734623249822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526140815888336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596553243949652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276544715754926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341879770482046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165932431989744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418200270788854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355154787373506,0.5261058356050645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119548739167918,0.0,0.0,0.16948304906946365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549487227846834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741880208171887,0.19933694939231253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747949460809823,0.0,0.0,0.14335320379607833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soullessgranola,2020/01/29,"In search of advice as a parent of a child with possible undiagnosed mental illness. This is my first post on Reddit as I am usually a lurker, but I need advice or even just a listening ear. 

My 7 year old daughter is in an ALE (alternative learning environment) due to her acute anxiety keeping her from being able to function in a normal classroom setting. 

She has become increasingly violent at school, destroying the classroom, hitting other students and staff, and trying to run away from school. 

She told me today that she has a voice in her head that makes her want to hurt people or break things. 

This breaks my heart. I want to help her in whatever way I can but I am just lost. The only place she acts like this is at school. She has no issues at home, church, or literally anywhere else. 

Does anyone have any experience with a child acting this way or hearing a voice in their head?



(Disclaimer: she has a medical caseworker that has been contacted and our only current option to have her seen by a psychiatrist is to have her committed and placed on a 7 day hold. I'm afraid committing her would do more harm than good.)",5.933230974632843,6.882021121495327,6.4723631508678245,75.88448598130844,66.75700934579439,9.665687583444594,30.70627503337784,9.784248007369934,2.9233882510013367,896,33,162,19,14,292,132,214,0.132,0.8059999999999999,0.061,-0.9633,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,1,2,3,8,2,1,14,0,19,6,4,1,2,26,31,12,0,5,8,2,0,1,0,1,2,5,1,2,9,6,0,2,1,0,0,4,1,6,0,1,4,6,25,2,29,24,2,32,1,2,1,0,25,14,0,5,9,112,34,8,0.1295297534050809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531499518128307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808467407996289,0.0,0.09908990681636104,0.0,0.0,0.09057021529760972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169746718281756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14305543600002965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353597521713878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113352360090391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820548807501608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555318049985698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670495364115844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017794207605663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864341165865646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658697926567502,0.0,0.1459894460232578,0.15349338144646776,0.08682106333740695,0.0,0.12992890387584247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386642800182201,0.0,0.0,0.13519540966846225,0.0,0.11513199635910296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328169471315574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14139702699694234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646211621291057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13048759933441975,0.1305355257091831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604467088432164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691165656629136,0.0,0.0,0.13591968694881507,0.0,0.0,0.19702642859759326,0.0,0.0,0.14382746234350546,0.0,0.0,0.08979962169413667,0.0,0.27066204661127113,0.0,0.0,0.14602533476114976,0.12405369843112984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3932730771283109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605381256947732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277906071148782,0.12377123025418944,0.0,0.08794220000573033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14265872354997453,0.0,0.15280000911701233,0.20562937827841812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201422042878818,0.0,0.0,0.08341291439308943
mentalhealth,Fire_phoenix33,2020/01/29,"The day before the rest of my life **The day before the rest of my life**

I have Autism Spectrum Disorder

...maybe.

Tomorrow is D-Day.

Diagnosis day.

Tomorrow I find out if I have ASD or not. Except, that's not true. Tomorrow a group of people decide if I have ASD. But they don't. Because whatever they decide tomorrow, I am the same person I am today. But it still changes me. If they decide that they don’t think I have ASD, where does that leave me?

Not normal enough to be normal, but not autistic enough to be autistic.

But at the end of the day, I still can’t drink fizzy drinks, and I still don’t understand your joke, and I am still me regardless.

I wrote the title of this as ‘Yet to be titled’ because I couldn't think of anything worth calling it, but the irony is I have accidentally found the perfect title.

Because that is me.

Yet to be titled.",0.6071141649048641,3.0453657790697686,2.4835095137420744,91.18210359408036,88.88372093023256,5.452854122621565,19.446088794926006,6.980632752743323,0.4417348837209305,662,20,138,10,22,219,80,172,0.055999999999999994,0.882,0.063,0.6351,0,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,4,1,7,3,0,0,11,0,20,4,0,0,2,33,25,12,0,7,14,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,3,2,0,8,3,1,0,9,0,0,0,2,0,24,3,14,18,5,19,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,4,16,103,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043503643090477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24542093655042896,0.0,0.22838836464846715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703304440500622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196563989925667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4327389841161904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15380464689903606,0.0,0.11743918718895754,0.0,0.0,0.2629295119513399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886122849985285,0.2773286239228597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226562254996293,0.0,0.0,0.14714320136449674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14209825707903062,0.0,0.0,0.1895786361033003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13482178023424132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629747061298788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303727397670024,0.1171781268007296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4286886727047762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17197968161085814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720575982963694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970676963979234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,letsgogetnachos,2020/01/29,"No one cares Even if I'm always there for my friends, when I don't feel well, nobody's here for me. I'm always listening and helping my friends. But when I'm feeling bad, no one helps me.

Everytime I ask for help it doesn't end well because I realize that they don't care about me. Most of the time, when I tell a friend, I realize that they don't give a fuck about how I feel. I can be at my lowest and try to talk about it and my ""friends"" take the opportunity to talk about their problems without helping me. It's only about them. Never about me. 

Sometimes, I talk to some tough stuff and they change subject. They don't want to know. Nobody wants to know when you're feeling bad. They only want you in your life when you're feeling well or when they need something. 

Whenever I have new friends, they always end up to be toxic. I only attract toxic people who only care about them. I'm just so fucking tired that I can't talk about anything to anybody. I just need a friend that I can talk to when I'm feeling good AND when I'm feeling bad. 

I feel like I'm stuck and that no one can help me out. I feel alone. I feel like nobody cares. I feel awful.",1.4984062850729531,3.249344304526752,2.800031799476244,94.66090067340069,79.20576131687244,5.405836139169471,22.156565656565647,6.1124844417494595,0.14550370370370347,898,27,204,6,22,290,103,243,0.177,0.608,0.215,0.8789,1,2,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,10,1,26,25,2,0,5,1,12,4,0,1,1,38,48,19,0,7,6,0,11,2,6,0,2,1,0,0,10,7,0,0,15,0,0,0,11,7,3,3,1,12,39,18,25,45,2,17,0,0,0,2,33,4,2,4,15,127,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123245352137091,0.0,0.0,0.19578645973427752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06454329443399864,0.0,0.0733238337630861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19646367487425606,0.04781174610273472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198687917734533,0.0,0.08297122355061352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893589418341334,0.0,0.0,0.05180395046657444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43623631648394895,0.11206443911184844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635806975965877,0.14501923180343934,0.0,0.07523963560417188,0.0,0.06578549018518491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628583787480508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620894145050301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055399219866544974,0.07663635084534785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631346360240015,0.060492007154842736,0.07575063223723362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594437492030166,0.23860591244045795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05437524504618453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504934462893066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060381198258657086,0.07757178384851335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978648916610771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05897150619712725,0.31520550825931204,0.06855349372101145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04573464261480849,0.09014666250686147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05325054365484462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13878462596027732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21156080832533825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756061660563647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I-Cut-Myself,2020/01/29,"I miss when I was really unwell I know this sounds really stupid, but when I was really depressed, self harming and suicidal I was mostly numb and didn't care about anything, It wasn't as emotionally painful as I am nowadays. Also my family seemed to be more understanding when I was so bad I didn't leave my room for years etc, just in general they were more caring I feel.

Nowadays I just feel completely alone, and I don't want to be, in the past I didn't care and just kept distracting myself from my bad thoughts or acting on them. It was so much simpler, I mean a good bit younger so that probably has something to do with it.

Now I am just desperate to not be an embarrassment, feeling low when you care is worse imo than being completely numb, but that is just a me thing, intense emotions are very painful for me, I have autism and I just cant seem to understand why I am feeling a certain way or how to stop it.

Sorry for the rant, I'm just hoping someone here can give me some insight or something...  I don't know im desperate to get better and not end up killing myself like I was planning for the last few months.",4.493552631578943,5.127347916666668,5.3467719298245635,83.80173684210527,69.83333333333334,8.887017543859649,29.673684210526318,9.029198982220553,2.2482821052631583,887,33,185,16,15,290,129,228,0.272,0.575,0.153,-0.9887,0,1,2,0,0,1,21.0,0,1,2,2,19,23,2,2,7,0,28,4,0,1,1,43,51,22,2,2,14,0,4,1,0,0,4,1,1,1,8,7,0,2,13,0,0,1,9,14,0,0,13,5,30,9,21,34,8,19,0,3,0,0,5,6,0,8,12,132,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428151960377173,0.0,0.08824083202790065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080244961714096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842627040325661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758894631916916,0.12046539692671228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4500060014569872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23138395730281305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950378062539536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482408502777873,0.09773067552743636,0.0,0.12306101986039432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402105887800336,0.0,0.22316986955565346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05764938546541805,0.10585055010084962,0.0,0.09255002724082516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959496829080267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918880061855773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207759256889708,0.0,0.12128266973746088,0.0899438388714727,0.0,0.11683674172711557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053907756394370336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019529597359215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807430546254437,0.0,0.08111441036213382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348243319714314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533437149575564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896784352390664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21206463200572584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20090327792047336,0.1151112592272536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349281530941704,0.1698940458736865,0.0,0.1235193593825517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225124430122042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206967510047245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330663291856793,0.0,0.0,0.0875995944509562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297408018573482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104409233946073,0.06508284667370832,0.08758471531147466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956691496096362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244840201088238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105693186045989
mentalhealth,hen-economy,2020/01/29,"What do you find frustrating about therapy? I know some people who mentioned that they don't like therapy. Each had a reason (it doesn't work, therapist focused on the wrong thing, they did not fit their therapist). So I was wondering what is your experience if any?",5.0729591836734675,7.223263183673474,5.5630102040816345,76.99716836734696,70.22448979591837,10.614285714285714,30.617346938775512,10.686352973137794,3.78381224489796,212,9,38,7,4,68,42,49,0.247,0.753,0.0,-0.8948,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,3,1,2,3,1,0,2,0,7,0,0,1,0,8,9,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,7,1,2,6,2,2,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,3,1,29,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589684638876709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286673823531277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21365730796398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847133073312594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420594905791075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620634698091953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24034972807857874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5346621338872245,0.5428392108588594,0.15530332079595205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25350856583290715,0.17018396935075972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25558572877285,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,phenylammonium,2020/01/29,"I can’t stop pretending to have an eating disorder This is embarrassing to admit. But for the past couple of years I’ve been going on the eating disorders subreddit and pretending to have an eating disorder. In reality though I’m just a normal teenage girl with normal eating habits and my only problem is that I occasionally overeat. I only just realised how toxic my presence on the sub was when I got called out on it. I want to stop fooling myself and others into thinking I have a deadly mental health condition. Although I know it’s offensive and invalidating to legitimate eating disorder sufferers when I’m faking this condition but I can’t make it stop. Does anyone have any tips on how to stop faking a mental illness? 

Sorry for the post, I understand it sounds attention seeking but that wasn’t my intention.",5.05339068825911,7.431736302631581,6.669999999999997,68.06730769230772,70.84210526315789,9.676923076923078,30.771255060728738,10.035473477838034,3.7789012145748986,666,29,102,19,13,228,87,152,0.22699999999999998,0.74,0.032,-0.9769,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,1,1,9,0,11,8,0,4,0,29,21,13,1,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,9,7,6,4,5,2,0,1,3,7,0,0,4,1,13,0,17,17,0,17,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,0,8,74,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748079216579654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691882431645257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123285296035707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171965955904455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5043060936836034,0.0,0.09626708121426047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5628185272079498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251900288160858,0.0,0.08798192905098642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693134235251215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06045647677371575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734299273238571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217205542923208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21556524698666932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16732919533422286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501327184818972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053554372602015,0.0,0.0,0.10526098300479854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314282490285527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36788010821437056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048746833625844,0.10808043672395433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452023179840652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06488444914370213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084032302277933
mentalhealth,-Lurker001,2020/01/29,"I need some help   I have severe social anxiety. Until recently I was almost a complete shut-in. I only went outside for school and depended on other people to buy me clothes groceries and it went on for 5-6 years. I am 18 years old now. Anyway people around me are bullying me. Almost everyone my family is very difficult. My classmates have spat on me and insulted me and even threatened to harm me. After a while I complained to teacher but they said that I was delusional that it was only in my head and that they weren't talking about me and they were only spitting on the floor.Now just to make this clear they were walking right behind me and were spitting countless times while insulting me and kicking the floor. Everybody thinks I am insane and completely incapable of doing anything on my own. Recently I managed to go to the store and even that was a giant step for me. I overheard one of my classmates saying that the girl who worked there almost didn't serve me but the boss was standing right there so she had to. And they said that i should kill myself like my mother did. People on the streets, people who I don't even know look at me strangely. My teachers aren't even trying to even pretend to be nice to me. And i have 0 friends and have a difficult time even going outside. I am very afraid because it almost seems that if I am ever in serious trouble that anybody could harm me and nobody would even care. I am very passive and almost forget all the times they insulted me. But also on the other hand it makes me want to do more and to be tougher, more assertive, to try harder because they already hate me and want me dead so at least I could put some resistance. I feel like I am all alone everybody is against me. What should I do. I really need some advice.",4.571485714285714,5.806817748571429,5.142571428571428,83.1284285714286,70.08571428571429,7.885714285714287,28.857142857142854,8.238735603445708,2.003942857142857,1412,52,267,20,25,453,167,350,0.184,0.723,0.09300000000000001,-0.9875,0,1,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,7,1,18,18,5,1,12,0,37,5,5,4,4,53,56,27,2,10,5,1,2,2,1,3,0,3,0,1,18,18,0,0,4,1,2,7,4,13,0,1,16,6,56,5,35,33,9,39,0,0,1,0,23,17,0,11,16,207,74,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865410259242544,0.0,0.0,0.4434064827906379,0.09172274356203734,0.09772953864666764,0.07082239749574366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774911180679924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287836064758592,0.07883828620096915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797222875659278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029409395352228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18570956576040198,0.0,0.0,0.14141789940191915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4094570803560941,0.08010871843961448,0.0,0.0846240670353687,0.0,0.0,0.08348766223619411,0.0,0.044779227619211125,0.06326817278992704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842220000364961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066279550795308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743589684947455,0.090889389683928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0593607372962024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797989873332301,0.0,0.04867094545740204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653310409082834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436914303945875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823064056800105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133408548356335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293013147046364,0.0,0.060011393175801724,0.20206445795772066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455888719984069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890285143501115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056734602781734575,0.0,0.1748870952653101,0.0,0.0,0.1512616426635555,0.16848405307014105,0.07042745846723336,0.0,0.08962871036013753,0.0,0.08062283344394787,0.0,0.10004900152922384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027703887493156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118217596567948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05674647134442221,0.0,0.0,0.1549223265313251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202545472520392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192169118010712,0.10447143643936853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16419432706935286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447364281764427,0.0,0.0,0.06291136915890355,0.0,0.0,0.11406107937554973
mentalhealth,Yintwin,2020/01/29,"News- Some People With Schizophrenia May Simply Have a Vitamin Deficiency *Link and other information*   

Link: [https://scitechdaily.com/some-people-with-schizophrenia-may-simply-have-a-vitamin-deficiency/](https://scitechdaily.com/some-people-with-schizophrenia-may-simply-have-a-vitamin-deficiency/)

New research came out about a condition called pellagra that cause psychosis, and how it lowers the body’s ability to use niacin/B3; this condition has been known for awhile by orthomolecular psychiatry to be one out of many underlying conditions that can cause psychosis or schizophrenia. 

Throughout the years I've come across multiple sources stating that Niacin/B3 has the potential to stabilize those experiencing psychosis. One story was how a doctor used niacin on a very unstable psychotic psychiatric patient; he was given whats called a super dose(a large but safe dosage) and promptly fell asleep to awaken in a calm state. I've also seen people state niacin helped them through a ""bad trip"" while on hallucinogens like LSD. So it might have therapeutic potential.

In whats called orthomolecular psychiatry they understand that there are several underlying conditions, like pellagra, that cause psychosis/schizophrenia. Here's a link to an article that lists many underlying conditions that can cause psychosis/schizophrenia, including pellagra: [https://www.alternativementalhealth.com/twenty-nine-medical-causes-of-schizophrenia/](https://www.alternativementalhealth.com/twenty-nine-medical-causes-of-schizophrenia/)

This article goes over the many different conditions and the symptoms that each condition can produce. I've actually made a questionnaire of these conditions and their symptoms in order to narrow down the possible underlying condition causing ones psychosis. You can fill it out and give it to your doctor(physician and/or psychiatrist), and hopefully reach a diagnosis that doesn't require the use of neuroleptics / ""anti-psychotics""

Questionnaire download- [https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jGJB-pv6fDRO9UH5SQUqPtfLv9SgKX87iZxRPLYds1E/edit?usp=sharing](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1jGJB-pv6fDRO9UH5SQUqPtfLv9SgKX87iZxRPLYds1E/edit?usp=sharing) 

""Safe Harbor Alternative Mental Health"" is a great resource with tons of information on many aspects of mental health. [https://www.alternativementalhealth.com/articles/](https://www.alternativementalhealth.com/articles/)

Sorry if this wasn't written so well. Thanks for reading!",21.447072796934872,25.833090841379317,14.211954022988513,21.86567049808432,33.6896551724138,14.030651340996167,44.731800766283534,13.115064733898606,7.047019157088123,2144,83,191,55,18,578,172,290,0.031,0.8290000000000001,0.14,0.9866,2,0,0,0,0,0,149.0,0,2,3,3,9,11,0,0,19,0,18,8,2,12,0,45,31,16,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,2,6,0,0,0,21,15,0,3,7,1,0,5,2,1,1,3,9,2,5,10,35,19,3,29,0,0,1,0,13,17,0,6,5,123,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.09529956706731402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809661365256339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815398771560649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084753924444069,0.0,0.0,0.2991574726460047,0.11169408677907673,0.0,0.5016054218363387,0.0,0.08412323109642457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203123185306226,0.0,0.19991304094926265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368190809356344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766766431971077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20761056859871446,0.0,0.0,0.06545771861269509,0.0,0.0,0.09699586574801906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542097750566292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924058240846328,0.0,0.3960372352960825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19683144578927309,0.10359910342525457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431815704971812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19852561138802166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354067352420617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009408207744974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768386019450608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032510187504027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093195005829182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20300692988996785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990984334607996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166483152159317,0.0,0.2530340000859437,0.0,0.08057760949641776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780576018913885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288818483815109
mentalhealth,Xplosionss,2020/01/29,"I'm finally seeing a psychiatrist, what are your experiences? The title pretty much says it all, I'm currently on the waiting list so who knows how long it could take to finally see someone but it's happening, what are you experiences? Did it help? I'd appreciate any response! :)",3.1019871794871783,6.000793942307695,5.490000000000002,71.13833333333336,80.73076923076924,9.620512820512822,29.82051282051281,9.725611199111238,3.905028205128205,223,11,38,8,6,78,41,52,0.0,0.758,0.242,0.9329,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,1,1,6,12,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,2,10,2,5,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,4,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15995306385427166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877986266162673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46016735038421297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5153291979787433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20799828462960046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15765847161218072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926704118320848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20815630896715726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17290878981360303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23929641805946056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870510031920492,0.0,0.0,0.3748689861653698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929540853772326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768510781354781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,markygator,2020/01/29,"My Mental Health Journey Hey guys, 

​

I recently started vlogging about my Mental Health journey, as well as trying to make uplifting videos for others.

​

My main mental illnesses consist of Depression and Anxiety.

​

I have been really addressing the things that eat away at me in the last year or so including finances, relationship and work problems, and more.

​

I recently have been kicking my video game addiction, which has been quite difficult, I am reaching out to see if you guys have any advice for :

​

A. Managing my time/money better (any budgeting apps, or scheduling apps)

B. Ways to manage my anxiety better

C. Ways to grow on youtube.

​

I would really appreciate and LOVE some feedback on this.

​

Link to my channel :

[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQ2FpGNfRvxKxfL1-8rPuGg?](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCQ2FpGNfRvxKxfL1-8rPuGg?)",13.623283582089545,15.737320395522387,10.051455223880597,52.83225746268658,50.268656716417894,12.371641791044777,43.615671641791046,11.93303328291395,6.0306746268656735,759,36,87,19,8,217,90,134,0.105,0.772,0.12300000000000001,0.5748,0,0,0,0,0,0,70.0,0,1,0,4,3,7,0,0,3,0,9,6,0,1,0,13,13,10,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,2,5,5,1,0,1,4,2,3,0,3,1,0,3,1,14,4,17,9,3,17,0,1,1,1,7,6,0,4,6,60,19,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898035806776973,0.0,0.061832734587840575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4799178765944998,0.5382122515498777,0.08605992194965502,0.0,0.09681218368218332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05945003848068048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192524896877357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054499666855868066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474731211594698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253067001499587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451920563086636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05157851856486026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571092079756424,0.0,0.04223733044712325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19130247012081952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605467427845081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730198864086831,0.0,0.0,0.08107266116350421,0.0,0.12495515541776812,0.06793491909702125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05042290987331481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04478719416712852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04203787134681639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036896839758315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04296036142282615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045134655962963,0.0,0.0,0.05689287009895722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04606580060356477,0.0,0.0,0.04494957102963944,0.0,0.5382122515498777,0.04074777466818981
mentalhealth,m8323,2020/01/29,"Help with diagnosis? Hi, I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar 1 disorder with features of schizophrenia. My psychiatrist also mentioned DID. However he got let go because he was an awful doctor. I dont think I have the right diagnosis. Please help with any advice. 

I have really weird episodes only a few hours where I’ll run around laughing and dancing trying to jump out windows, no one can catch me then I’ll start crying, falling to the floor screaming at people I can become very violent. Sometimes I know what I’m doing sometimes I don’t. I have had hallucinations too. I can’t do anything by myself I’m extremely co-dependent but I can’t hold any kind of relationship either. A lot of the time I can’t tell if this is my life or not. My dreams get confused with reality cos my dreams feel so damn real I’m still not sure.  A lot of the time I’m watching my self. I’m very scared of any kind of friendship or relationship because I get extremely obsessive but then very bored when they show any interest back. I don’t care about big life changes such as immediate family dying and one almost but I get infuriated by humiliation and rejection. 90% of my time is taken up by my looks all I care about is my looks if I don’t look good I definitely do not see a point which I realise is vain. Feel like everything is relevant. I don’t know. 

Sorry, I’m just writing everything down because I’m not sure what I’m suppose to say. An help is good, cheers:)x",1.925625,4.442499792387544,4.019384731833913,82.33125702854673,82.21799307958477,7.211115916955018,25.640246539792386,8.278499904357787,1.9955094290657442,1156,48,224,26,32,394,161,289,0.198,0.67,0.132,-0.9517,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,1,0,12,21,2,3,10,1,27,5,0,1,3,39,53,16,1,2,13,0,2,1,0,0,5,2,1,1,4,10,0,1,5,4,0,6,13,10,0,2,6,9,29,11,26,46,5,26,0,1,5,0,14,10,1,8,11,129,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772442446214304,0.0,0.0,0.10014127489411674,0.0,0.0,0.07997453185219214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27202925433742176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229618003677702,0.08902628623001041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689821963693277,0.0,0.18288766166872408,0.11044845198801473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039249770776196,0.0,0.10579278313993457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985157885858213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150369269923576,0.10379014031600037,0.0,0.11461521017938316,0.10236008396082752,0.0,0.0,0.11720594980227465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17975737129784253,0.0,0.09427648510733964,0.0,0.10113178576775482,0.07144410072141523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567465709992037,0.0,0.05683555083097349,0.16776009317664448,0.07998370367892507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20109516241454795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984854818226528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20828111976108926,0.109921048012904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226261623814144,0.14127398398283858,0.04885773945874199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519388332986132,0.0,0.0,0.17004256041453827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355329174028885,0.07605885049809212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933136889132045,0.0,0.0,0.1097762407572707,0.0945377226572608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382839443052407,0.06406621997740176,0.0,0.0,0.2147374174502123,0.0,0.08540433172951002,0.0,0.07952855621408741,0.1001231639707782,0.0,0.07969160477733753,0.0,0.1043277681777199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19781641285445328,0.11194820713135184,0.07078455776590517,0.0,0.0798646908825722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885084003103364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740940032405009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407962227354343,0.0,0.0,0.1749424048873774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789731398289038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475455578361012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DuJoJa,2020/01/29,"I was wondering where do I seek help for mental health So I’ve been dealing with my mental health for the past year and have been ignoring it but now it’s at a point where I can’t anymore I’m started to see things that aren’t real, my dreams of depression are at an all time high I’m becoming someone I don’t want to become I want to go back to being me I just want to know who should I go talk to about my mental health?",3.088758865248227,3.1403311382978742,4.5795744680851085,90.13333333333335,72.72340425531915,7.9687943262411345,24.177304964539005,7.793537801064563,0.8887219858156024,333,8,80,4,6,112,61,94,0.078,0.812,0.11,-0.0387,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,3,0,11,3,0,0,1,13,22,3,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,2,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,3,1,11,0,13,17,1,14,0,1,1,0,4,6,0,1,6,52,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533366736629437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188894996979396,0.0,0.0,0.34152055174396584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594014213663233,0.13316979448659236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757426956112758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4930459946407905,0.0,0.0,0.10363526994522207,0.16335938555324392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497243802411013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4674470891380136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759764726661714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14616128438825604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598588015638658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232082493825796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100490732560507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943739268427152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427379371454395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271942950980777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015733216891192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735880485176787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16767352510394293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956708162454654
mentalhealth,WitchWoman4,2020/01/29,I don't know who needs to hear this but.. You are amazing. You woke up today and conquered your demons again. You are not alone. You are more than that mean voice in your head. You can do this. I believe in you. Stay strong folks. There is always a reason to live.,-0.81111111111111,1.2629808518518502,-0.13888888888888928,106.745,101.5925925925926,2.4000000000000004,11.555555555555555,3.1291,-2.0579111111111112,202,3,48,0,9,60,41,54,0.0,0.8420000000000001,0.158,0.8334,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,8,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,0,7,1,1,1,0,7,12,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,10,2,6,11,1,6,1,0,0,0,10,3,0,0,2,34,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30854238603071305,0.0,0.0,0.24788295326254736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33563980227201096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057391010004752,0.0,0.33576346930343914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16372220300672352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630578317710623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32450866542499074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22089467959957407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30629858621792444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.317529819132218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823815317152389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raqa1234,2020/01/29,"I'm struggling with loneliness Hi everybody, I created this Reddit account to ask for some advice because today I came to the realization that I feel lonely. 

To start off, I am an 18 years old boy, I live in a big city in the Netherlands and I would say that I am relatively popular. I have more than enough friends that I regularly hang out and party with (so this is not my concern). 

Ever since my teen years, I have been struggling to get a girlfriend. I wouldn't say I'm awkward with girls and a lot of people (even the ones that I don't know that well) would say that I'm quite likable as a guy. I dated multiple girls over these years, but I never really had a relationship. 

I feel like that is the thing I am missing, and every time I fail to establish a proper relationship, I get more and more sentimental to the point that I'm struggling to keep myself from crying in public spaces and at dinner with my parents.

This sounds very stupid and cliché, but really all I want to do is just to hold hands and cuddle to help me fill my emptiness.

Any advice would be appreciated",5.52588193202147,5.738164665116282,6.446976744186047,78.29776386404295,67.46511627906976,9.406082289803221,29.096601073345266,9.265573868473778,2.298649373881932,853,27,169,15,13,284,123,215,0.14300000000000002,0.741,0.115,-0.8475,1,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,5,12,1,4,12,0,17,3,1,0,3,33,32,12,0,5,4,1,3,1,2,4,0,4,0,4,13,14,1,2,3,0,1,3,4,8,1,1,3,7,25,4,26,24,7,23,0,3,0,1,16,10,0,2,11,118,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25398909661066915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837665831892552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149423432565493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922187352195922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14863861216358934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275399128267785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342825115732616,0.0,0.08583677331052468,0.1175554646470493,0.10949616397685147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314224721565195,0.09284282153753386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004060939966908,0.0,0.13579655302491409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867996127980852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710885894282051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551363741855268,0.0,0.0,0.0714221338139238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349146170910686,0.0,0.11475628422115665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104865967304429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023248533138797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637023531909978,0.0,0.08806366331045362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14430422351192587,0.0,0.0,0.09009729066406093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285337522069195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13822752146528214,0.0,0.0,0.16651028056577866,0.0,0.0,0.2790549188029033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100461260131312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107503527305253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198573427215516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4075844691868453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633906488192981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578020817347073,0.0,0.12318605036067296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722988470013432,0.07665325630088653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168488566480442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769576911393869,0.0,0.0,0.2510682378643464
mentalhealth,newdirection915,2020/01/29,"X-post: an SSRI AND an SNRI at the same time?? I need answers. I want to feel better but I am hesitant because I fear serotonin syndrome.

I've been on Prozac for over four years, steadily increasing the dose. I'm on 60mg/day now. My new psych prescribed me 37.5 Effexor when I told her my depression still often gets the best of me. She said it's fine to take them together. I'm poking around all over the net and haven't seen posts that mention specifically taking Prozac and Effexor together. Anyone do this? Or take Effexor (an SNRI) + an SSRI?",1.8227777777777767,4.322238314814818,3.3255555555555567,87.25000000000004,82.51851851851852,6.933333333333335,23.814814814814817,8.07648339933343,1.5901703703703705,430,16,85,9,12,141,80,108,0.114,0.7859999999999999,0.099,-0.5733,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,5,5,0,1,8,0,4,3,0,0,1,13,16,6,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,4,3,12,3,10,12,4,14,0,1,1,0,6,6,0,2,6,50,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552420326609511,0.0,0.0,0.19764549028020914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13534175536771967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329970225325549,0.19635926301254192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318498140266336,0.0,0.1912260998630071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24983500807275155,0.11226033471360856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159966499289057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16462553263608792,0.0,0.21442897139068035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4252689085539911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21119252382375767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773060143695212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5007957970148921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294620530968112,0.0,0.0,0.21215028921449494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095355867263178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297404878642106
mentalhealth,Astheperfectmoon,2020/01/29,"Diagnosed ADHD today? Hey all,

Cross post from r/ADHD.

I had posted on here with a throwaway before. I’m just feeling a bit confused/disappointed and hoping for some support. After working with my counselor for a few weeks, she recommended I get screened. My previous diagnoses were GAD, then BP NOS, then GAD and Depression.

Today I met with my psych. He prescribed me 10mg of Adderrall to try. I’m grateful because I’ve been struggling to manage my anxiety with my current meds and counseling. So I’m hopeful Adderall will help. Along with the shit storm of my life - disaster house, debt and disorganized bills, lack of career development etc.

I’m feeling a bit disheartened because after chatting my doctor said “So you want to try Adderrall?” And I said yes, if he agrees that he thinks it will help. He said well you have mild symptoms, but you have a job and did well in school. But he has also diagnosed people later in life (I’m 30f).

I guess I fee a bit like he thought I was a drug seeker. Or maybe I don’t have it and am just lazy. I dunno. I thought I’d feel better once I had a diagnosis but I’m just feeling confused.

Has anyone else had a similar experience?

Thanks!",2.655640782228975,5.080742458515289,4.112257452059996,83.31340991076517,78.56331877729258,6.777368520979684,27.423770647427386,7.893859768569023,1.9368483387127409,929,40,173,16,23,307,137,229,0.09300000000000001,0.731,0.17600000000000002,0.932,3,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,3,0,2,9,13,1,2,10,1,16,9,1,0,1,37,40,17,0,5,8,0,4,1,0,2,8,3,0,0,3,13,0,0,7,1,3,1,1,5,2,0,13,8,23,8,20,25,8,15,0,2,1,0,18,3,1,8,10,100,26,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553323707870777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495100733555677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126462104622692,0.0,0.0,0.07427753704396642,0.10884379815562106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951198944781522,0.0,0.09039275098564636,0.0,0.0,0.09395060205243434,0.34792249515845936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149457445825172,0.3234595092978661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872951728552216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319150038423493,0.0,0.08874040016844909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184730170900472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039119964196836,0.0,0.0,0.2148495746243998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05550008148171792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702282646061125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14240564024387378,0.0,0.0,0.21101802286425225,0.0,0.1225735913583565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541553671458734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500648640473472,0.05189794909746065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067209498777512,0.0,0.11799607471161767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131300377443708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364556554274243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20347535114896584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30314329649344496,0.0,0.0,0.107509057875909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904217537454512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105324225425406,0.0,0.0,0.1205470050792053,0.0,0.1104122341781298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978010620999685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680670250359244,0.0,0.16866735319181975,0.0,0.0,0.20138466493104654,0.0,0.0,0.14424455097493696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265640586263918,0.0,0.08521020970915844,0.0,0.1910246150010075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733571719710469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BushmanV5,2020/01/29,"I can’t deal with the stress put on by school I’ve been sick for a week and unable to do my work.  Now I’m behind ~10 assignments.

I wake up and go to school at 5am.  I leave at 6pm. 
The three hours I have is working on current work, doing chores, ect. 

I can’t catch up and I feel overwhelmed. I have no clue what to do.",-1.9159159159159167,-0.17055505405405036,0.6923423423423429,104.7434984984985,92.78378378378378,3.8294294294294287,13.627627627627628,5.033348758259628,-1.4983525525525532,242,4,67,1,9,82,52,74,0.145,0.8370000000000001,0.018000000000000002,-0.8074,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,2,3,0,9,2,1,0,0,5,12,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,1,1,8,0,13,11,0,13,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,4,40,9,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613097363287292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815876003797266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14404914667086147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24961048865722374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268381246562317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548008220275361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5130371823845308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903415799681019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203313128973934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5535733346433722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PrizePackage1,2020/01/29,"Bell Mental Health Day Please take a moment to help - **mental health affects more people than you could ever imagine**. 
In Canada it's Bell Mental health day.  

Each time you watch their official video on Instagram, Bell will donate 5¢ towards Canadian mental health initiatives.

[](https://www.instagram.com/p/B743bG0Ag3o/?igshid=xcna6hef8f2x)](https://www.instagram.com/p/B743bG0Ag3o/?igshid=xcna6hef8f2x)

They have other options as well like Snapchat  filters, Twitter hashtags, Facebook frames, YouTube videos, texts and calls made on Bell's network (excluding iMessage). 

It takes little to no effort to donate to mental health initiatives.",12.610681818181815,18.05371515476191,6.21199134199134,64.12694805194806,64.1190476190476,6.387878787878789,30.25541125541125,7.686295010490155,2.8847761904761917,539,19,53,7,11,134,63,84,0.022000000000000002,0.865,0.113,0.7928,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,2,2,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,2,1,8,6,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,4,2,10,3,2,10,0,0,1,0,6,5,0,1,6,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618669873267746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866677710666293,0.0,0.0,0.1593948497770066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178314909229367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6567868431073534,0.0,0.0,0.08283156036769827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037384609576201,0.12385736971718753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693225425838025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6226865268794093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856732513911699,0.0,0.0,0.135651258897221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18583017588430825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205917933235573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111123760319576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,icy_lava,2020/01/29,"Anyone feel that doctors are playing games? I’m sorry if this offends actual doctors, but I have been feeling this way for a while.  

Every time I see a psychiatrist, I am forced to see a different psychiatrist than last month because it is a “revolving door” at my local municipal mental health services building. That means that the psychiatrists barely stay. They stay for a month at this location.

And for me, I haven’t been prescribed medication in more than 5 months because they say that they can’t prescribe medicine in good faith as they won’t be able to check on me as the doctor will stop working at the facility. And I have schizoaffective disorder.  I have been inpatient in 5 different behavioral health systems across the state of California. 

All they are interested in giving me are antipsychotics, and they make me feel stupider, slower, cause excessive weight gain, and I suffer extrapyramidal effects such as not being able to open my hand when I take them (depending on the drug). 

I felt that Ativan was helpful, and so did my family on my disorder, but they tell me that Ativan is somehow not safe even though my pupils according to my optometrist no longer open or close normally as a result of the antipsychotics. 

Why is it that these doctors think the antipsychotics are so helpful when they have only caused me woe? In many cases they seem to cause MORE hallucinations and delusions. They cause me more irritation. Yet, when a medicine does seem to be helpful, they take me off it. 

So, I feel like these doctors play games with me. I feel like they get paid oodles of money just to show up to work without doing anything remotely helpful for me. 

I know I’m not the center of the world, but I feel that for a doctor, we patients should actually matter to the doctors, but it feels like we don’t. Or at least I don’t. Maybe other people feel differently about their doctors. 

I’m looking for other people’s thoughts on this subject.",6.506166666666665,7.738730838888893,6.5177777777777814,75.05000000000003,65.6111111111111,9.666666666666666,32.77777777777778,9.827888789773867,3.2509444444444444,1562,64,271,33,24,496,184,360,0.10400000000000001,0.753,0.14300000000000002,0.9394,4,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,2,0,14,4,13,13,2,0,18,0,28,14,1,8,1,54,55,25,0,3,12,0,11,3,0,3,12,1,1,0,20,12,1,2,16,5,3,0,10,4,0,0,8,15,46,9,44,41,5,38,1,2,3,0,25,22,0,7,14,191,66,11,0.14428228277366714,0.0,0.1407986950175918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050442763422759086,0.0,0.05936601253775335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795314039909574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29643529758501225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261164148699853,0.1653599960893877,0.5907161207305976,0.06313119897819094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366082071216806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047648543506695035,0.0,0.060782023040322174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800824770234172,0.0,0.2918138294715943,0.15461293746370666,0.06926680897305983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03769076885881422,0.06920435639028066,0.0,0.060508566682005736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15336531964469444,0.0,0.0,0.1934187456063951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039646884652366966,0.058804658780147574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573355307540792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060580389554203376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048154772060854924,0.07313979436637512,0.07247547295152028,0.07858285187055418,0.0,0.07267461031423235,0.07270130274038981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17274711236500528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068300154446952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054866588829019965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002716804163647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736953116420537,0.0,0.0,0.11497429908048948,0.13134917137357846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075610150032328,0.0,0.15378571606814992,0.0,0.06031322446587136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848232049415593,0.0,0.06305453732161202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04622513046906497,0.07087830513198293,0.05727200801745636,0.042066079686353904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0572622801391366,0.0,0.0878484752725192,0.0,0.0,0.06509615926487271,0.0,0.0,0.06954148593427377,0.0,0.10503922025292396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whykillsirius,2020/01/29,"How do I talk to my therapist? HELP PLEASE I’m really trying to better myself here.

I don’t talk to others about my problems. I don’t talk to others period. I don’t trust a soul in this world. 

I don’t WANT to talk to my therapist but I know I need to in order to get better.

I know theres issues I need to work on but I don’t know ***how*** to bring them up casually.

I have an addiction problem, I have trust issues, I feel as if theres no point to life, nobody is who they say they are, I feel trapped on a planet surrounded by people who do everything they can for themselves and care about nobody else but themselves, I miss my abusive ex, I have an inferiority complex, I hate myself...

Last time we just talked about video games and cats.

When it got silent I just spaced out and stared off until she spoke.

***I DONT KNOW HOW TO TALK OR WHAT TO SAY***

I see my therapist in a couple of hours and I want to leave with a sense that it was a good session.

I’m super awkward talking about how I feel, its just not something im comfortable with.

I dont know. I just dont fucjing know.",-0.6984252183406099,1.4786840960698695,1.7319418668122282,95.39149358624456,94.50218340611357,4.7838973799126645,16.326555676855897,6.4784943948869325,-0.2869902838427945,834,21,191,11,32,282,118,229,0.14800000000000002,0.7020000000000001,0.151,-0.0711,0,2,1,0,0,1,36.0,1,0,4,4,16,15,1,1,7,0,17,2,0,4,0,38,40,16,0,7,10,1,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,10,8,0,0,10,3,0,1,10,6,0,0,3,8,37,9,33,37,0,20,1,2,2,0,21,12,0,2,6,127,47,2,0.0,0.115100473489512,0.0,0.10590196015884418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17183302013907634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904540066731253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748865936354587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415582659403397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115185340049509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730730839469909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473576957336934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050754047396342934,0.0,0.0,0.08148028693092345,0.07769541614041117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959101870009317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511398201122434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566786910389226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493284510962098,0.2027874604332225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203288110626589,0.07918582000896016,0.0,0.10286211170125092,0.0,0.0,0.06861610847268496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144062989598083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06734783849494146,0.0,0.0,0.10663560595048377,0.09183305304675496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859085374944931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06223332244864421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15450658036301246,0.0,0.0,0.07741167401958987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478666413367133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5465680844823176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383771266716049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056645801261765875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595481106868048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459681167799447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072243051291698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EnchiridionBoy,2020/01/29,"What wrong with me At night I turn on my music and drift away, but as i start to drift i start twitching, moving my fingers in weird directions, and screaming in my pillow, and gripping my fist so hard. My thoughts are gruesome, I feel like i want revenge against her,him,they. There arent angrier moments in my life than these ones. It started when I was 13 now im 16, and the thoughts from then are still here. Its been years but theyre still here, And the anger continues to get deeper. (Never wrote anything like this but I just needed to let it out)",2.4932432432432456,4.470391342342341,2.7714324324324338,94.9630945945946,77.01801801801804,5.521081081081082,24.613513513513517,6.2581,0.5168659459459461,433,15,93,3,10,132,78,111,0.162,0.742,0.096,-0.8379,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,9,6,1,0,2,0,6,3,1,0,1,18,17,12,0,2,4,0,4,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,6,7,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,4,0,1,5,5,14,2,15,11,0,23,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,15,63,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17010357758412153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19420954840048196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045180867379161,0.14767267599251974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10799671985217567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18517031749848814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22328077577931307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21137356396671447,0.14600440800717307,0.20197477625063276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21969854477789927,0.0,0.1532718189664231,0.1594264272147649,0.0,0.0,0.19398203252816185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400711073122822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4389282652600482,0.0,0.33015553421080873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3282071017655215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22483961545126666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192209687332893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260034210458477,0.0,0.13311357097279986
mentalhealth,siriusblakk416,2020/01/29,im pretty young but i still think that im not good enough what if the person is unhappy just because im not worth anything? i know that im not good enough to love but sometimes i hope and it always ends up hurting me. I dont like this world anymore,-0.6310649350649378,1.4940993999999996,1.4197402597402586,98.87818181818184,91.36363636363636,3.8701298701298703,18.766233766233768,5.288315135182226,-0.5294675324675326,197,6,46,1,7,65,39,55,0.271,0.5529999999999999,0.17600000000000002,-0.6577,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,11,6,4,0,2,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,5,5,2,6,2,5,0,1,0,1,2,2,0,2,4,26,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13507478136206347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099157532269556,0.0,0.0,0.13358694052528464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895721839187094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19025408273444747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14377962262281313,0.33546855769021594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723158909646796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612341580283777,0.0,0.0,0.17378176173616486,0.0,0.7013937305279763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921444772293613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930812745328035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14651265260448856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14174367086470005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16515190247910433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16055234500011864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964003561565848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040169870061176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,September-27,2020/01/29,"Question about my mental health For quite awhile now ive felt like my mental health is not the best as in ive been paranoid thinking that my parents are watching what i do on the internet or people being able to read my mind(this one i know is fake and ofcourse i do not believe it but the thought itself has crossed my mind),some times I think of my friends dying and how it would benefit me again I do not plan to or want to kill them its just a thought that crossed my mind.I feel like I should be feeling sad here but i just cant seem to?idk cant exactly explain.I also sometimes wish I was alone and i feel uncomfortable being happy all the time, not exactly looking for emotional support but im curious if I have any mental issues.",2.4845428571428587,4.604329473333333,3.456571428571433,89.36399999999998,77.6,6.152380952380952,28.04761904761905,7.1686216300943375,1.473361904761905,591,26,119,7,14,189,98,150,0.132,0.672,0.19699999999999998,0.8755,1,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,3,8,10,1,0,5,0,19,2,0,1,3,34,33,12,2,5,12,1,4,2,1,2,2,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,11,1,0,2,6,3,0,1,5,6,21,7,10,23,2,8,0,1,2,0,4,2,0,5,6,83,28,1,0.13132775118473908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360159438499168,0.0,0.10502275517502617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930737422610145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796140357546428,0.13782037259000945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13629747175181667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477260438507713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19920977086924294,0.09382057168690304,0.12609523607891066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014634947927572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980083316576514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791905166937426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185650723476756,0.13707205221593685,0.0,0.0,0.1452946988607956,0.0,0.07217429753372845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832021121584167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028223525585924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3970424537324624,0.0,0.3978107740890768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899108299169396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582392609912428,0.0,0.0,0.09104612696551832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711713709470473,0.13968322883739145,0.1313632903393163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955585235319828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988650396360954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14902917574018004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16829904035400836,0.0,0.2085191299770484,0.15315653565124082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746051023346469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15102043264029688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329146646438084,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saphrierie,2020/01/29,"How do I call out of work? I woke up this morning absolutely dreading today. I also need to make my first therapy appointment and I know that’s going to tire me out very quickly (social anxiety). Where I work is all about customer service and if you’re not all happy and fake while working then they will get mad at you. One of the 7 managers knows about my issues, but she doesn’t work until later in the day. The other managers that work in the morning are more strict and don’t take mental health very seriously.",4.741890756302522,5.745745990196085,5.479131652661064,81.73323529411769,69.49019607843137,7.789355742296919,28.296918767506998,7.957251820313856,1.7894801120448185,409,14,78,5,7,133,75,102,0.11199999999999999,0.888,0.0,-0.8395,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,1,6,6,5,1,1,4,0,6,2,0,2,2,16,14,11,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,2,1,0,11,1,13,12,3,16,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,8,56,15,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410633670334452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494202629283766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801194631067338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376046386883608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15004186838192826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215933524504306,0.0,0.10024959173547053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18777622247272044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18750010063529454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841110069864385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19388463778947665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177453237589535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17776511158742506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079498124645655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195301130868278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798129337583131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262741574775685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20172355493034536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027406057190492,0.16720224865529792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910894178751043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6420898940420079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imkatattack,2020/01/29,"My Parents Dont Understand They refuse to understand everything going on.

I wanted to do my first ever mental health day since my friend passed away in 2016. My dad screamed at the top of his lungs at me to stop being lazy, my mom told me I was just tired because I was up too late, they claimed that because I’m apart of a strong family that I shouldn’t feel this way, and so much more. I ran to my bathroom and bawled my eyes out as I got ready for school.

I tried messaging them. My mom told me “You rock! I love you. Thank you for being strong and going.” I appreciate that because she did tell my dad to tone it down.

But I feel miserable. I confessed how I’m feeling again, the fourth time since my friend passed in 2019. I told them how things get progressively dark each time I feel this way, and that I’m scared if I don’t get help I’ll hurt myself. I’ve always gave them hints that I really do want help because something is not right. I’m undiagnosed, and every time I tell them I want to get help and more support, they divert the topic and just tell me they hate I feel this way.

Why can’t they just understand? I’m crying for help so I can be okay, but I’m just getting failed. What do I do?",2.420357142857142,3.760443972222223,3.4184444444444435,92.99600000000002,75.54761904761905,6.786031746031746,21.33015873015873,7.365786028017652,0.3928311111111111,939,22,217,11,20,301,130,252,0.08900000000000001,0.77,0.141,0.691,1,0,1,0,0,2,25.0,0,3,9,6,11,14,1,2,4,1,16,5,2,2,1,35,49,15,0,5,8,5,5,0,2,1,2,1,0,0,11,9,0,2,9,1,0,5,5,6,0,1,9,7,49,8,21,36,4,29,1,3,1,1,36,12,0,1,9,128,60,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344983782618277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422634774403962,0.0,0.0,0.24454494742128316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11016454717750476,0.06467915916543368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753987080239582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071861609416727,0.08449918082008373,0.0,0.0901347509822264,0.0,0.0945450798181718,0.0,0.25354977825807395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530715818584395,0.0,0.0,0.15496858307946468,0.0,0.20959085820069756,0.0,0.11399495184204335,0.0,0.08021157810314089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099016233359367,0.0,0.10660424931554144,0.0,0.0,0.26889077956727925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736319309789592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313219838409415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051620869595052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106936588866927,0.0,0.0,0.23491834621580995,0.0,0.0,0.07372515224139474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136087542038314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424874532090971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564764958081286,0.0,0.0,0.10040841593200388,0.10149947127547332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592289012944444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720862631574542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384745694632527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380861781435905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262975291911444,0.09233413713646688,0.0,0.0,0.06662863784741795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17544081766336825,0.11526932521757285,0.0,0.28749598293083,0.0,0.06809075415405026,0.0,0.0,0.31321824662304426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774620350897268,0.23881810056423944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049669387882046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,woahhhmom8,2020/01/29,"What happens if I check myself in? I'm struggling. I'll try to be brief on why I'm struggling... diagnosed GAD years ago, well treated with meds. Had a baby 16 months ago (she's perfect). Husband suffering from severe mental illness (diagnosed with bipolar, depression, OCD, and anxiety, but not certain those are correct) and refusing treatment. I know he's not treating me right and it's 100% because of his illness, and the way I've been feeling/treating him. A month ago my next door neighbor had a mental health crisis, his wife called the cops, kept escalating, SWAT came and he was killed by the police. The front of the house is destroyed. All while me, husband, baby, our 2 cats and 2 dogs were held up in our bedroom on the farthest side of the house. Since that event, my head is FUCKED. I can't think properly, can't focus on work, can't hold a conversation with my husband about anything important. It's just been getting worse and worse. I started therapy again about 3 weeks ago, have seen her twice and have another appointment tomorrow. Saw my psychiatrist last week, he said he didn't want to treat this ""depression"" with meds yet as he thinks it's temporary due to the event next door. Seeing him again in March. I'm losing my shit. All I can think about is cutting myself, although I don't really want to. 

So my dilemma: I feel like I need to check myself into a psych ward, but I'm worried about how that will effect the rest of my life. I'm already struggling to get approved for long term disability insurance due to anxiety and narcolepsy although they were well treated at the time of my application, now I'm struggling I know I'll get denied coverage if I'm admitted for mental health. Not to mention my job. I know I have short term disability and I would still get at least 80% income for 6 weeks I think if I needed that much time off, but then if I do, what do I tell everyone when I get back? ""I lost my mind and checked myself in?"" I have no issues admitting I have anxiety and such, and even talk about it, but right now I'm so far from where I've ever been I just can't even think. Also, what would happen to my family if I were admitted for days, or weeks even? My husband is suffering as well, and due to a med he takes I'm not confident he can be home alone all night with our daughter, only because he absolutely will not wake up to anything for at least 4 hours after he takes this med (prescribed by dr). Not to mention, I do 95% of the work for our pets: taking dogs out, clean up poop, walk dogs, change litter boxes, feed them breakfast, etc. I'm afraid the household in general would be in disarray if I was gone.

Should I ignore all of these issues and check myself in or should I keep trying to push through with regular meetings with my therapist? There's a ton of detail I left out so if you want more info before providing advise please ask.",5.0246900679238085,5.701643903339193,5.670836460361944,81.79606896879307,68.66608084358522,8.893003372440981,30.14112003039947,8.994212911058018,2.3626444782216307,2267,84,448,39,37,736,276,569,0.185,0.772,0.043,-0.9979,2,1,0,0,0,1,82.0,4,1,2,7,31,27,5,5,19,0,41,16,4,2,8,88,91,40,1,17,21,6,1,1,1,7,9,1,7,0,14,26,2,6,14,0,4,6,13,17,3,1,19,5,60,10,67,62,13,77,0,6,3,1,43,28,2,9,43,277,74,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428023268186428,0.0,0.0,0.07092134851406147,0.07556588912749704,0.054760899427302986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180393107709379,0.15715377179221612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127011995912456,0.0,0.06401659611734913,0.0,0.0,0.052654458540119686,0.0,0.0834856848814935,0.0,0.05826874219548395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699225037053673,0.0783192556843047,0.0,0.0,0.07243941069098782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04416189299697962,0.0,0.11795799360592407,0.13900509021236265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636977096799841,0.13568490915315762,0.0619412167455289,0.0,0.06543254941816501,0.0,0.0,0.06455386483367259,0.0,0.03462394478011424,0.04891986390755328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330572963222998,0.17888159749668947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110767635467196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027698727354796,0.14557534488828922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868784778372443,0.0,0.06743588790375568,0.15802614517106134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429440477576782,0.06795269161789567,0.060865356399121724,0.07575947115819245,0.0,0.11289923146352347,0.05581775920912567,0.0,0.0,0.07440028052529067,0.0,0.04836721297022874,0.033454322204603266,0.0,0.0,0.060599843269068025,0.0,0.07660806157470312,0.0747505534004812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042493024044411,0.0,0.20702562831243645,0.0,0.06914208181101472,0.0,0.10931511121832972,0.0,0.05033835205159129,0.10154940952082928,0.0,0.0,0.14565177967003906,0.06426086998158641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207971795796304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516700054870687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04386801332396675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169576842072512,0.06513715019201988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05456717098985483,0.0,0.0,0.07735933128885078,0.07029048608491895,0.0566447447229813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048468255569020915,0.0,0.05468568810501016,0.0,0.0,0.2863474193373443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445817141194534,0.05503908533042,0.059851771173762364,0.0,0.07830922751928646,0.07950688215093002,0.0,0.21938595133926328,0.0,0.0,0.07985878518854668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298255072684514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12116823263910174,0.05435372351230919,0.21971194317360665,0.0,0.18470669256851294,0.0,0.061789691814557984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09970390144617912,0.0695415488938483,0.1395674880157942,0.14593193457839493,0.0,0.0,0.0440968360089016
mentalhealth,kerokerogrips,2020/01/29,"Seeking help with medicine side effects! Hi all! First time posting here so hope my post is ok!

I have been signed off work for 10 weeks in total due to a ongoing issue with medication side effects. I am based in the UK. I have major depression and generalised anxiety disorder. I have been prescribed pregabalin which caused me memory loss and confusion (have ceased use) and venlafaxine which caused nightmares every night (have recently ceased use of that too). I cannot be on SSRIs due to awful side effects I had to them many years ago. I am now beginning a Mirtazapine regime (15mg) and I’m extremely concerned about weight gain. Due to my anxiety, I worry I will put on weight. I am currently going to the gym once or twice a week to help with the depression and am tracking everything I eat. 

For those who have been on it, what were your experiences? How did you combat potential weight gain? 

Thanks in advance!",4.020767543859652,6.5319138362573135,4.656487573099415,80.71350328947369,74.38011695906431,8.953362573099414,28.231359649122812,9.516144504307137,2.9263359649122798,730,30,132,20,16,233,113,171,0.15,0.737,0.113,-0.6991,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,1,9,6,7,0,1,6,2,20,5,0,8,2,22,27,8,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,8,4,0,3,1,0,3,1,4,0,2,6,3,17,3,20,19,3,29,0,3,0,0,7,10,0,3,14,85,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310638037851315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21248156623717213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853305624194187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392296947036034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15916546062577736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421061871014826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11701014663485908,0.0,0.1248139961472868,0.13584868461717226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812899239321678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789271913716641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861731039317414,0.0,0.0,0.13793653199023162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495185896010884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407998226379474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399043069668531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032697350246214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789983204819473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660122003042197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13961008243787604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371246165655018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785959367754346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098049236019388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398908598031929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22279804649677268,0.5073455501703443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110435577351876,0.14103667757074773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943245212399567
mentalhealth,chairholder123,2020/01/29,"Sexting problem Sorry for my bad english:(

I (22M) have a sexting problem and I hate myself for it.  I occasionally write to women on dating profiles to do sexing with them.  I don't force anyone to do so and stop writing when she doesn't want to.  Sometimes there are women who participate and I really like this at this point.  I then send them nude pictures and this excites me very much when they look at and comment on these pictures.
 Then when I'm done, I hate myself and delete the contact, block the person everywhere because I'm ashamed.  Afterwards I am very sad all day and hate myself for everything I have done.  The next day starts, then the whole thing starts from the beginning.

 I have already made plans to stop several times.  However, the urge to do so is often too great and I do the same again.  I hate myself for this behavior and am sad almost every day.

 What can I do about it?  I want to be a normal 22 year old man.  Why do I have to be so gross?  Why is my psyche so bad?  I want to be like my colleagues. I watch very hardcore pornos with really extreme fetish like asslicking feetlicking, but I dont even like it in real-life. When Im horny I turn into an animal and I cant explain it. I hate myself so much!:(",1.930940860215056,4.049206233870969,3.427903225806453,88.89102150537634,79.40322580645163,6.068817204301076,22.833333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.8259188172043008,958,31,196,12,24,315,129,248,0.172,0.7709999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9642,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,3,1,15,19,5,1,10,0,25,2,1,1,1,31,42,23,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,4,12,13,0,3,1,0,0,1,4,13,0,0,3,2,34,6,23,36,5,30,0,2,2,2,15,7,0,2,26,137,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071369398304514,0.0,0.1180682298074294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481122900351453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17866754644486635,0.06522127339484997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20700278622942225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21897973514960534,0.12539371807493266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706671454552977,0.0,0.09014529610237043,0.0,0.09615742706081976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795895509281736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5281617873980652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556961937593414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090833654026361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898462552116407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012383292828476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730272446412294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11378710680508375,0.0,0.10482935224784416,0.0,0.0,0.11227000833553463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934212062514447,0.0,0.0,0.1011419348789806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20475361069767875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178021358320465,0.13708351051333784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087040078295752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581773171887388,0.1197686802393923,0.1514588448031917,0.0,0.0,0.178900049929496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710806688225968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06238784133059652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637647122839208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26483858492139106,0.1893197962966574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19308710893568545,0.1194526431737987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889928018838061
mentalhealth,thesquishiestone,2020/01/29,"Can someone please give me advice? I think it’s safe to say I’ve been depressed most of my life, but I noticed two years ago that during my period my depression would skyrocket and the suicidal tendencies were so high I would stay in my room in bed to keep from hurting myself. I realized this wasn’t normal when all my friends were looking at me like a crazy person when I told them. Fast forward and this past year I had a great job where I was promoted to a manager extremely quickly, had a great social life and was doing well in school and even with all that my depression was crazy. A lots changed very fast. It’s my senior year of high school and I transferred schools halfway through the year bc I moved, got a new job and all my friends turned out not to really be my friends. Whatever. Didn’t think it’d be a big deal bc I’ve changed schools so often and people come and go. Well after  my first day everything went downhill. It’s like my anxiety, depression, mood, everything just took a nosedive. Daily anxiety attacks, hourly suicidal thoughts, constantly spacing out. I’ll go days without sleeping and I’ll be so tired. And when j finally sleep it’s for maybe an hour or two and I back to awake and exhausted. I’ve been leaving in the middle of my classes because it’ll be to much to handle, I’ll get so stuck in my head that I feel like if I just don’t get out I’ll explode. It’s like my fight or flight is constantly stuck on flight. I feel like I have to run the second my chest constricts. I’ve also been incredibly paranoid lately, anytime anyone laughs or whispers or even glances in my direction I think they’re talking negatively about me even when I obviously know they aren’t. It’s like my thoughts overpower the rational part of my brain. I’ve started self harm again after two years of being clean. Eating has become so hard, I’ll be starving but the thought of food makes me nauseous. I honestly just want to know what’s going on. I have a slight suspicion and I know I definitely have some anxiety issues but I’ve never been so bad mentally that I’m this frustrated. If anyone takes the time to read this... thoughts?",3.9491351158645287,5.545749221176474,4.70331550802139,84.28067736185385,72.08235294117647,8.351515151515153,29.81996434937611,8.927757054556999,2.422992156862745,1709,72,338,34,33,550,215,425,0.19699999999999998,0.655,0.147,-0.9829,4,0,0,0,1,1,37.0,0,0,2,2,25,28,3,0,17,0,32,11,5,1,5,62,65,33,2,6,14,0,3,6,3,3,4,2,3,2,17,18,2,3,13,1,0,9,8,11,2,5,23,7,45,16,36,32,8,62,0,5,2,0,14,20,0,10,40,207,62,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990320192898257,0.06341148658325196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05720653644171935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417230299366964,0.0,0.0,0.10003791039045892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138142204388903,0.0,0.0550060213180598,0.05972876077231343,0.04360708940578364,0.07900481874981634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985674985358819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513491498806364,0.061621092903236675,0.0,0.15460790503501662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226835086669244,0.07374947328470391,0.2464520608821466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319819288875425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417446349720004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12858214201019838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234051958730707,0.10220927729890747,0.0,0.07836312711055551,0.0,0.06084765869326919,0.08650044040523265,0.0,0.16580335669234986,0.0,0.07474819977734122,0.06862291767382328,0.12196501565547417,0.0,0.05721309713583138,0.1577352429108345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408133461903406,0.0,0.07341557709101472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116137029892152,0.0,0.0,0.14089518686475294,0.0,0.0765797275254258,0.0,0.0,0.07466398436380854,0.1419749554885468,0.06358362016144258,0.0,0.0,0.11794134257298212,0.0,0.08069462798770033,0.07574526633237827,0.0,0.0,0.10105461233480924,0.20969040928971247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060071407377615536,0.0,0.0,0.060816523108730834,0.0,0.0,0.04775018699831261,0.0,0.07186655108351063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209048350363885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603041434187935,0.05258647686892605,0.0,0.055172223969156615,0.06908897628243585,0.0,0.0,0.07008913959939775,0.0,0.08144310407134064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746546482131247,0.06828827905467008,0.04959338165762448,0.062461627646242524,0.0,0.07852397972047183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155438688859729,0.0,0.04582717101231749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056887525864195626,0.0,0.289589071635123,0.0,0.0,0.07462663592920288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14317338047202524,0.07292095293102246,0.06061139750298373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05063286135679015,0.07624682233614953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564954211348718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053785438783311115,0.05749714620471935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375102734032169,0.0,0.2271632883359015,0.04171265038428378,0.08221899202599643,0.0,0.06835478529226947,0.07947804877182912,0.0,0.07780956920088013,0.2096379851772333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059023890261753385,0.042193213214412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12863716325523336,0.06631368809267595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689572147347248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163286360373684,0.0,0.0,0.2303310649103405
mentalhealth,MissChloeJenkins,2020/01/29,"Feeling really upset 😭😭. i suffer with severe mental health issues really badly and nobody knows exactly how much i'm hurting on a daily basis, nobody messages me and asks me if i'm doing okay or if i need a hug which hurts me. nobody asks me if i want to meet up with them for a friendly chat or even if its just for a really long hug, I have no real friends and i'm all alone in this world with no real support 😭.

I've tried getting all the help their is and im in therapy till October 2020 which by the way i don't think is working for me as it should be, I should of being sectioned under the mental health act 1983 because i am a danger to myself and i have thoughts about hurting other people but i take all that anger and punish myself for it because i deserve every inch of pain i get not other people.

Reason why i haven't being sectioned is because in the UK the NHS like to put you in the community for help first and they say that getting sectioned is the last resort and they wont put you down as a involuntary patient unless you are very very seriously ill which i am but they dont see it that way?.

They would rather try and work with you to get you back on you're feet to recovery, slap you on medication and leave you to live you're life? which i find is disgusting. i'm not targeting america here but i will say that they get it way easier to be sectioned than over here in the UK which i find to be very unfair. the NHS wont section people because they are under-funded, over-run and in massive amounts of debt?.

p.s Miss chloe jenkins.",4.919185425101212,4.686268947692309,6.148744939271258,81.44546558704454,68.75384615384615,8.688259109311742,28.18218623481781,8.20500826718156,1.7591230769230766,1228,36,254,15,19,415,161,325,0.16399999999999998,0.752,0.084,-0.9822,1,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,7,8,3,8,20,4,1,15,1,26,9,1,2,4,48,47,25,0,10,14,0,1,1,2,6,6,2,0,0,17,15,0,0,7,1,1,3,9,13,0,1,1,4,38,7,40,35,10,31,0,5,1,2,26,20,0,6,6,177,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10214918919730992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18440832064162868,0.0,0.0,0.07583908597606809,0.08235052299571151,0.2404916206164873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559165018291667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514307161713412,0.0,0.08309860886710327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04986943931840018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18028898551028455,0.08389319402685456,0.0,0.0,0.1523999824262068,0.0,0.2576461182627328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20967457273474102,0.0,0.0,0.13221696058100127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31675095202265513,0.0,0.10653550448749614,0.10294233601701278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054203542358907626,0.08039524015667003,0.0,0.10443314437242107,0.0,0.0,0.06966409539805772,0.04818481261207599,0.0,0.08709060875915292,0.08728295478183176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993576507492228,0.19878828700863507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250315956103529,0.07313164557186626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494748056312156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20512936467239146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982973950218582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22452122903475413,0.1895514715932764,0.10140633394637978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15686638886437845,0.0,0.0,0.07859399729687168,0.0,0.0,0.1114219220808448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111922242626206,0.0,0.0,0.07415621814495484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279007330460993,0.0,0.0,0.06319704156821837,0.0,0.07829986491431831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339243029813766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24413606624917486,0.058173535331190414,0.23485969611264454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899671328665347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143605175393928,0.0,0.0,0.07006272491760063,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Markysparkybug,2020/01/29,"Does anybody feel like a completely different person at night time? And wake up regretting the things you’ve typed said or don’t in the morning? I often wake up and cringe at the things I have written or said the night before , it’s like I have less inhibitions sort of like you would from drinking too much , like hangover fear I guess.
Except I don’t really drink.

Is this a common feeling ?",3.33436090225564,5.612387473684212,3.860075187969926,86.72552631578951,75.57894736842105,6.974436090225563,24.01503759398497,7.957251820313856,1.3383406015037589,312,10,60,5,7,98,53,76,0.09699999999999999,0.746,0.157,0.5622,1,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,1,6,0,6,4,2,0,0,12,12,4,0,2,3,0,2,4,0,1,0,2,0,1,4,2,2,0,2,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,4,6,4,8,8,2,9,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,5,8,38,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16432052485409876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20246986673447076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20175656252010327,0.0,0.0,0.1689899475135786,0.0,0.0,0.3783442774764504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21729997554119296,0.19528222386199565,0.13795625939739706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127300259616084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773708905440967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419564610071326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3624371999495013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16861429282487975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237098091034389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3673795006984901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256584499129314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260271804365254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13717824903128692,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,outtoanocean,2020/01/29,my life feels dull I kinda feel like my life has lost all interest.When im not at work im just sitting around my house so bored and tired and its all so dull.My friends are all avoiding me so i cant go to them about it but i feel like im losing the little bit of motivation i have left.,-0.7302597402597399,1.0170090909090916,1.6750216450216475,99.8468181818182,86.87878787878788,4.983549783549783,17.004329004329005,6.1826913282559595,-0.652785281385281,224,5,59,2,7,76,46,66,0.185,0.6779999999999999,0.138,-0.2995,0,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,4,6,8,0,1,1,0,4,3,0,1,3,15,9,6,0,0,3,0,3,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,1,3,9,3,5,8,4,6,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,1,2,32,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16672677017550905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044708998074406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840965862527809,0.2675983614682098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469888888542287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644056067566092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21610616904426946,0.0,0.0,0.6069122403076262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20348986660068066,0.0,0.2645752850841178,0.1829997283495945,0.18771261463439928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095282990912105,0.20444788692188268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152609638690756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634850205943588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shortjedi,2020/01/29,"Sending Positive Vibes!! :) Just wanted to send positive vibes to everyone out there struggling with mental health! Just remember that you are stronger than your mind believes & you can over come your hardest obstacles - just stay positive & keep pushing! 

Now lets kill this day!!",5.748550724637678,9.483594869565225,4.07391304347826,79.50985507246378,78.56521739130434,8.284057971014493,33.7536231884058,8.841846274778883,3.9683884057971017,228,12,33,6,6,65,37,46,0.151,0.585,0.264,0.816,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,4,0,0,6,2,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,10,6,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,6,5,0,9,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,2,20,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5090577064430101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646672515330293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20235731801516024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15149987722860525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22447006980168693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497022362650541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088020552600158,0.2598971602090337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402151339522125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23673771770195706,0.0,0.23719583094898886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26611138389066896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25038670604803925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24558276338665225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855816348336406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anxietythrowaway69,2020/01/29,"Unable to enjoy physical contact, looking for advice I have always detested physical contact as long as I can remember. I was very mildly molested at a young age.  This seemed to be the origin but no amount of therapy has changed the fact that I break out into a sweat at the prospect of shaking someone's hand, much less any kind of sexual activity. I was a depressed child as a result, I had resolved to kill myself in the second grade. I have been procrastinating the act ever since. 

I had no friends in school as the avoidance I had at anyone I was even slightly attracted to made people assume I was gay. This made me avoid anyone of the same sex for the same reason. I have trudged through decades of acting out the part of a human being. I have a career that paid for my house and all the video games in the world, none of which playing brings any real distraction. 

I escaped into marijuana use for a time, which allowed me to more convincingly play the part of a lover. I even convinced a woman to marry me. I spend my time taking care of her, cooking, cleaning, etc, but she has recently made it clear she is not sexually satisfied. Without marijuana as a psychological crutch I am unable to overcome my horror at performing intimacy. I am not sure what I should do as my current job requires a great deal of mental effort which weed interferes with. In any event I was becoming more depressed with chronic use anyway. It is very dificult for me to talk about this with my wife in a productive manner as I become very emotional.

I am not even sure I am looking for any real advice here, just hoping that I can get some of my frustration out by sharing it with the outside world. In my experience, being alone with nothing to live for while everyone else goes about their day part of some big joke I'm not privy to is worse than whatever death may bring.

Anyhow, thanks for reading and have a pleasant day.",6.0299502428622205,6.6654259128065405,6.709337756190022,75.38027484895156,66.43869209809264,9.543371638431466,32.57777514512499,9.54385415503706,3.0363636772894216,1518,61,274,29,23,500,200,367,0.155,0.6829999999999999,0.162,0.6182,3,3,0,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,1,4,9,28,3,4,26,0,31,7,2,9,6,53,48,12,2,2,8,1,1,0,2,2,1,0,1,3,13,12,1,4,5,7,2,5,8,9,0,1,13,3,40,19,63,30,15,37,0,2,2,3,16,18,0,7,13,206,53,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19233380687718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192497869130147,0.0,0.0,0.08188652798810933,0.0,0.0,0.2676936822940569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13762368251015547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173762736538348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003374217206931,0.0,0.10410666951186744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693498070731796,0.1014582777370098,0.16952393371889607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822104578627707,0.11070006534126874,0.0,0.0,0.10975520688286816,0.19500026104868512,0.0890191363979716,0.0,0.09403672300226644,0.0,0.09626565563014047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603273742751801,0.0,0.051416120519764526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084993924118058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977451546535548,0.0,0.11355404131969846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976585582519962,0.0,0.10887811139028254,0.10248077920328554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868994508105494,0.08709137464682211,0.1652823067696475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.279358965345162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099175980135773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234402006888532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442880716639364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197112722904312,0.0,0.0682263732340498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984384638276526,0.22402842024432615,0.0,0.10118375395700108,0.09716981179397467,0.0,0.1114814216291056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09959802813145303,0.0,0.08959043593423237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814072845459132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338402605461694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18550397436241547,0.0,0.07399345030191462,0.07909970293894683,0.0,0.09060439303227676,0.11254250678345516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476946151188895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999245126082965,0.0,0.24360020422835246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486549439502784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029006455783793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LedgeTheCreator,2020/01/29,"I feel like my life isn't my own anymore Here recently, I feel like I'm living someone else's life. Most days, I'm unhappy and have a constant feeling of dread linger over me. Others, I just lay in bed. 

Everybody close to me tells me that I look unhappy and ask what's wrong. I'm working a dead end job, live in a crap town, in a crap state, where there's pretty much no opportunities for someone like me. I feel like this life isn't the one I'm supposed to live.

I'm an aspiring musician, but I haven't picked up my guitar in about a week because of these thoughts. I've been wondering if a location change is best for me. Just pack up and never look back? Seems like a thing I could do.

I really need some input here.",2.3179385964912282,3.6033335131578963,3.944736842105264,89.3414912280702,75.71052631578948,7.698245614035088,24.508771929824558,8.344100000000001,1.2981298245614037,562,18,128,10,12,188,92,152,0.11,0.7440000000000001,0.146,0.738,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,3,8,11,2,1,9,0,8,5,2,1,1,21,24,5,1,3,4,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,6,4,0,0,7,1,0,0,5,4,0,1,2,6,16,7,14,21,5,18,0,0,2,0,2,10,2,5,12,73,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13706306774666707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920381480820287,0.0,0.0,0.10627176892649713,0.0,0.08424900434249404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450385146091824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462034655291089,0.0,0.0,0.14935142702910406,0.0,0.11034612657369254,0.0,0.0,0.08913134078391079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545325480709688,0.0,0.12240936282932754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795241247190865,0.29620286394957424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371479821798603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928566406095156,0.3376019901725211,0.0,0.3661148969796898,0.0,0.2321162145871273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159720307998844,0.10247788774617286,0.10659287285855944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365186182578497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14060503695682092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885382074848793,0.0,0.1364616051565354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258174166291551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342027390966496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079800594992875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181782667823844,0.0,0.0,0.10972000841065233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086039768857583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14987835057099028,0.10061550597358497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110640278407025,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tsing440,2020/01/29,"Beautiful Dreaming Everytime I dream my life is beautiful. I feel beautiful, everything's at peace. I'm finally at peace. Then the reality of the world just shakes you awake. You see the bland grey snowy outside, clothing in your room. The same boring old home smell. Every same item from last night there. Board again.. Everything you wanted or had slipped away again. Like sand or time. Now I guess we wait. Life will be beautiful again soon. I'll just try and take a nap.",1.5208333333333317,4.145276386363641,1.850272727272728,92.24624242424244,97.63636363636364,6.4375757575757575,20.639393939393944,7.554174236665415,1.2882930303030302,374,13,73,9,15,113,67,88,0.023,0.6990000000000001,0.27899999999999997,0.9776,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,4,0,0,8,3,0,1,5,0,4,2,0,0,0,12,11,4,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,5,9,1,6,8,3,18,0,0,2,0,5,6,0,3,12,39,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23690131446231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21244553658859716,0.0,0.4532286668783281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12749358791689874,0.0,0.0,0.2762157720931192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777694121986973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529249690019849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20553424620582672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3561991308775925,0.12318675980682907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366237853209387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645868746890915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009292833659767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895838903919688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470295068200937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711919176326652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872340340203907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,burnout321,2020/01/29,"I need help with my BURNOUT I'm studying for my second year at university at the moment, and have had the toughest last few months in my life.

My first year I didn't take that much stress about my GPA, but still did my best and even worked 16 hours a week on average and had a healthy amount of stress and succeeded in my courses. And I started my first relationship a bit before the summer. 

The fall of my second-year studies was when things started to go downward, and I couldn't read the signs before it was too late. I had ambitious goals for my course grades, but this was something I also had last year, the difference was that I now ""had to"" get the grades rather than ""I would like to have these grades"", which afterwards thinking was a toxic way of thinking. But I thought I could go through it since I've done it earlier also without any extreme consequences, but in addition to this, I was in a relationship which stressed me a lot (which I didn't realize until after the burnout). And the combination of school stress as well as relationship stress kept me awake at night and stressed, but my mindset about stress was during that time fucked up, and I thought that stress just increases my performance and I just kept going. 

After stressing my mind out during the first period I decided to take a more chill approach and started to meditate and not put high expectations on my grades since I just felt grossed out from the last 1,5 months of stressing. One week into the second period I suddenly felt a bit dizzy, and I felt like my brain didn't function properly, my short-term memory was extremely bad, and I just felt grossed out about school work etc. And I felt like I couldn't feel anything, so this was obviously a burnout which was also confirmed by a doctor.

I had the luxury that I could take a vacation of my studies during the second period without it affecting my schooling, so I did it. I talked to a therapist, did my research on how to get better, and actively sought for help and improvement to my wellbeing.  After 1-2 months school free, I felt better, but long story short I came to the realization that if I want to recover 100% I have to break up with my girlfriend (which obviously was a hard decision, but a decision which I had to do), after the breakup I had 1 month before the starting of the new school period, and I felt good and ready to get back to school.

Two weeks ago when the schools started, I felt extremely anxious about going to the school, but I still did go and studied (naturally shorter periods of time, than I used to) and used all the knowledge that I had acquired during my rest period, to minimize stress and to just get the courses done. Even though I didn't feel stressed about school, I noticed that same burnout symptoms are creeping up, as not sleeping on nights, a sometimes dizzy sight, a bit slower thought process and a small headache. 

And I'm scared that if I continue my studies now at the moment, I will burnout again, or feel as bad as I feel at the moment. But then again the other theory I and my therapist have here is, that I have rested for 3 months (even though this period included a semi stressful breakup) and my wellbeing could increase if I get back to school, to my normal things. My therapist has also asked me if I would like to have some antidepressants, which I have always been against for, but because of my current wellbeing I have started to think about them, and if they would have a positive impact on my short-term and long-term functionality so that I could execute my schoolwork normally.

The other option I have thought about has been, that I would now during the third period take away the one and only major course which is from the more advanced side, and only Finnish my two other courses which are from the easier and wouldn't on their own cause unbearable stress, and then for my 4 period and for the summer vacation I would rather than work go on a vacation for this whole time, either backpacking or going to do some semi-light work in a resort in a exotic and relaxing environment. And continuing doing self-development, on every aspect of my life. With this option, my graduation would draw out with 0,5-1 year, but this would not cause any extra tuition fees, only extra costs in terms of travelling expenses and lost potential income. This option is something that I know that would make me happy, and make me feel good, but I'm scared that it wouldn't solve the problem and I would just be 1 year behind my studies, and jumping back in my studies would then be even harder.

Have you experienced something similar or do you have some thoughts/advice on this topic?",13.589879096528401,7.858288835400227,11.983265560004664,63.62585118376553,56.925591882750865,15.66176573494538,46.482486490689276,12.37720459611534,5.4075932745014175,3715,141,692,76,29,1176,315,887,0.099,0.797,0.105,0.8696,3,0,3,0,0,0,95.0,0,2,3,22,44,37,1,16,54,0,76,7,2,8,3,157,134,80,0,31,34,0,14,4,1,13,4,0,0,0,45,50,0,2,26,3,5,16,13,23,1,11,48,16,99,15,107,65,27,129,0,1,1,1,13,36,1,15,79,513,144,31,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0348427685117049,0.031607017805106816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405681294085745,0.029668765832092082,0.0,0.0,0.04849479743399365,0.0,0.0,0.04028129043860753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02934196610725305,0.0,0.033333678796492135,0.0,0.03350011838553943,0.08225211498103506,0.059542777087521814,0.02173565272701741,0.0,0.09102224988623617,0.0,0.037418920380018636,0.06306991865116067,0.11678181399149587,0.0,0.0,0.03980404577278847,0.0,0.040781126628090685,0.0,0.07325735789650246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387410952547225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03725307853091528,0.0,0.03649557139799173,0.0,0.07297722399026181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039766022712960564,0.09420217992537773,0.0,0.0300418367975317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014408168876567,0.0,0.2738838974509313,0.0,0.0,0.09098728646862418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032963527983744814,0.09314431061950924,0.0,0.1418494471793171,0.059813359088343565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037956625330363127,0.031940898935079766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04779911969395865,0.0376726708355095,0.0,0.0,0.03511411669904206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01959568271472031,0.08719354211865186,0.04022168034548727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05036997401347914,0.06967915811571129,0.0,0.0,0.06310912585686307,0.0,0.0,0.03892289012593087,0.030313576172334024,0.0,0.0,0.04760150225058633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036002538188445364,0.0,0.14230195863097012,0.0,0.02621136642998955,0.026438576902274486,0.0,0.034436923358177565,0.0,0.06692174620539773,0.06987089572026789,0.0,0.04059475308320423,0.0,0.0,0.0483230481302474,0.08135430632895681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034118111661087865,0.0,0.03584427019800965,0.0,0.0,0.03566579025792352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484405513051935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139603521010689,0.3608591848465337,0.0,0.0,0.03719713158676394,0.0,0.0,0.058990256921624615,0.0,0.035681891638476716,0.0,0.0,0.08234951849099846,0.035264835371701775,0.0,0.15142560157391907,0.0,0.056950080842037815,0.0,0.5718158498466923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03706038319914691,0.10723592288269077,0.028659055665718726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419858438918507,0.04737671169891917,0.06854104664672077,0.07006395538523354,0.11322797313185524,0.06237414801796185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06966173782436423,0.0,0.0,0.06159091554612304,0.0,0.0,0.021030915898363672,0.0283021852275841,0.08580361717542151,0.0,0.03205915306896817,0.0,0.0,0.03980880829528592,0.0,0.06874249544834585,0.0,0.10383238182397958,0.0,0.0,0.253290996836189,0.0,0.0,0.13776831540069528
mentalhealth,TheBeanis,2020/01/29,Callie needs your help! SDIT Follow Calliope on her [Instagram](https://instagram.com/callie_atyourservice?igshid=1sz1jcafg7chc)as she trains to become a psychological service dog. She needs to increase her Instagram following in order to get sponsors as she trains to become a psychological service dog!,14.302749999999996,19.606495775000006,9.845000000000002,42.29000000000002,53.75,10.0,37.5,10.125756701596842,5.30425,261,11,24,6,4,73,27,40,0.0,0.862,0.138,0.6792,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,7,5,1,6,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,0,15,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7908704312317151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870649851716724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399916204569705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5309752107551919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigOlWoody,2020/01/29,"Depressed/Suicidal Family Member Hi All,

My brother (42yo) has been in and out of depressive episodes for many years now. According to him, he's been struggling with mental health for nearly 20 years. Lately though, it has taken a turn for the worse and he has appeared to become suicidal.

A few months back he had sent me some rambling text messages about hating his life, so I gathered up the family and headed over to his house.  When I arrived I realized he was incredibly drunk, he tends to self-medicate with alcohol... Speaking with him, he let me know that he hated his life, hated waking up in the morning to go to work and just wanted to end it. I felt like most of this was the alcohol talking, so I ended up trying my best to talk to him, but it was useless at the time. We left and I went back a few days later when I knew he was sober. During that conversation it was a little easier to talk to him. I had asked him if he had ever thought about how, or when he would kill himself and he said no. This conversation we had made me feel decent enough where I didnt think he was going to take his life.

Fast forward to the past few days and it looks like he's back at it. My brother is gay (accepted to the family and everything). His boyfriend has reached out to my sister, basically saying that my brother is out of control. That he's back at it with wanted to take his life. Any suggestions for going to see a counselor are basically ignored. He says that most counselors are ""More fucked up than I am""... He says that he ends up counseling them... He also says that he cannot stand the way meds make him feel.

I am in a terrible spot. I have been dealing with him for a number of years. 10-15 years ago he had serious issues with alcohol (which never really went away). I want to help my brother, but I feel like he doesnt want to be helped. Additionally I have my own family to worry about with two little kids and a wife. I cannot mentally afford to be wrapped up in my brothers issues. My sister is a little rougher around the edges and has said that she is seriously considering committing him (not sure of the details...).

I'm just kind of in a hard spot and am looking to see if anyone has gone through something similar and if you have any thoughts or recommendations.

Thanks!",3.8374838040943215,5.191983383259913,5.004431199792695,82.96634620367972,71.99559471365639,8.248665457372379,26.78906452448821,8.757208317658263,1.913823218450376,1792,61,360,33,34,592,217,454,0.114,0.8170000000000001,0.069,-0.9719,1,0,4,0,0,0,62.0,2,1,1,3,21,20,5,1,20,0,40,13,2,4,5,66,81,27,2,8,10,8,5,3,0,1,8,7,0,1,18,26,4,2,11,1,0,9,7,12,0,1,27,16,48,8,66,50,11,63,0,2,4,2,71,27,1,9,30,243,66,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505096476243669,0.2352772589121892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05868558816020888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998080039848152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051312174925704224,0.0,0.0,0.065327796838914,0.06860463641851845,0.0,0.06894718869310988,0.2257127184542625,0.0,0.0,0.08104745618618545,0.0,0.0,0.07701254468543148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230699886860278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465391152811456,0.07565623590282826,0.06320599465455808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949907557356897,0.07582584420554515,0.0,0.0,0.06638051555190409,0.0,0.0,0.06595329048154835,0.0,0.2767216437566303,0.0,0.11131628142147576,0.0524259282837994,0.07046066427374524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784282245602173,0.0,0.0,0.12511837149942762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573813144657742,0.21735611392858373,0.07531370695893623,0.07800433179275909,0.0,0.0,0.09837621727111527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08467590352826157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531887825874134,0.0,0.0,0.08118911796777754,0.07641870313437406,0.040330222662297535,0.0,0.08278095475421719,0.0,0.07973251476096611,0.07504066159247617,0.20733467642153025,0.10755593474233983,0.2206517562841636,0.0,0.0,0.12324905833648557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943822378728036,0.048984748650371404,0.07440040291020597,0.0,0.0,0.16302735570149898,0.0,0.14790870723225796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05857483773767042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05659867936656745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005384471850641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04701201386866373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13961100018721204,0.2334333187761211,0.0,0.0,0.11695595058768132,0.0,0.0765560772305239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05649500224489217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671745213150914,0.0,0.16054154655973624,0.0,0.06916405816415515,0.0,0.1103520788282373,0.17695113456108738,0.0,0.067562622646235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04702184851994027,0.07209993554256422,0.11651825135385548,0.0427911139842691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049823283904288036,0.07982130394658941,0.0716860299893691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313640628318697,0.058249230132747964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605640302156924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05342481733708712,0.07452556004536036,0.0747851131729775,0.05213026996546062,0.0,0.0,0.1890289446850395
mentalhealth,laurenxjadexxx,2020/01/29,"When will it be over I am here once again wondering when everything will be over , I stress and stress I’ve everything. I’ve tried to kill my self twice and I haven’t succeeded. Once again I’m an trying to battle mental health and see how well I can succeed to be able to be myself all over again 🥺☹️",-0.12165384615384413,2.086985200000001,1.7387500000000031,97.06812500000004,89.30769230769229,5.711538461538463,15.817307692307693,7.1686216300943375,-0.14526923076923115,238,5,56,4,8,78,41,65,0.187,0.696,0.11699999999999999,-0.7003,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,8,7,2,2,1,0,9,1,0,1,1,6,12,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,0,1,6,3,7,6,1,8,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,5,37,7,2,0.20879954416909252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3753111336537021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219441515448756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310057593969145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21042083034554096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44472940012029855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16638620333465182,0.0,0.2178234620568833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47835834477135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835223690575386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18773586602519335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264341988591477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Blueberry_Muffinnn,2020/01/29,"My therapist thinks I'm doing a good job with life... so why can't everyone else see that... I feel like if anybody knew my life, I might get treated a bit differently sometimes, I just wish they could see the improvements I make on myself like my therapist sees...",6.0947058823529385,6.2087541568627485,6.541960784313726,78.43882352941178,66.25490196078431,10.72156862745098,32.68627450980392,10.504223727775694,3.2701450980392166,206,8,41,5,3,67,40,51,0.0,0.747,0.253,0.8979,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,1,0,10,14,2,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,9,4,2,11,1,1,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,2,2,22,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124268330105205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535327561886522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20329073222284808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16254346094480948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18592591271309114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838358114139546,0.13900528754710292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016580419925215,0.0,0.0,0.16320129832607902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19308687071974376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27486987124428724,0.1901202213698837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988113505033713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064146164899848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4651561567144232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19244085286755788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4518359673382996,0.0,0.12467658253235832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755747704932462,0.0,0.22375304570418475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway85301,2020/01/29,"I need advice, please. I’ve been struggling with depression and anxiety for a very long time and recently it’s been better, i’ve been going out more and living life. But these past few months have been really rough. 

I grew up an abusive household and never really received love like a child should have. I’ve never felt i guess satisfied? Even after talking with family or friends, I always end up feeling alone and crying at the end of the night. I’m not sure if what i’m feeling is because i’m lonely or what but I have a fear of doctors and social anxiety so i don’t necessarily want to go to the doctors any time soon. I guess what i’m asking for is advice, I don’t want to rely on my friends all of the time. Is there anything i could do to help this?",3.71590909090909,4.652342269230772,5.144755244755249,83.43660839160842,71.8205128205128,7.980419580419578,26.361305361305362,8.296473431620573,1.6349179487179488,598,19,122,9,11,201,92,156,0.161,0.7040000000000001,0.135,-0.4975,0,3,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,4,10,0,2,8,0,15,4,0,0,4,29,31,12,0,6,6,0,4,1,2,1,3,0,0,1,6,9,0,0,3,0,0,4,5,4,0,0,5,4,10,6,17,24,3,23,0,2,0,1,9,5,0,5,15,77,16,2,0.0,0.15690308161784744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588101871838531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371533337904092,0.0,0.0,0.11018898851189386,0.0,0.0,0.09005417865344595,0.0,0.20261095961127604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897526323158484,0.0,0.12380037547745985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072562243371723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711998033604715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573133558467614,0.0,0.14546367422120282,0.0,0.0,0.11405826601754902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710871170217966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345801492428574,0.0,0.0,0.08746608285239936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483938837172885,0.14901599641300292,0.13391706601930073,0.0,0.12714966726543694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20462390180092094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505214242009676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917642002184556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887623145607748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353635603392868,0.06469662402358467,0.0,0.11693452906495122,0.1171927875832912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951957894649047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570111998286844,0.0,0.0,0.09819215477457964,0.20427009376929006,0.0,0.0,0.12427277166760513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264155417555677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536391273266094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16967089318532114,0.0,0.1307546374053608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349915666014582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844034274323744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124809879000481,0.0,0.0,0.10643895244526012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316558874840708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926526729407242,0.15621649807979168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SeasideRendevous,2020/01/29,"I Feel like Stabbing Someone Im 14, almost 15, a girl. I'm seeing 2 psychologists at the moment but they always brush me off or down play my thoughts. I'm sure there's something seriously wrong with me. 

I know I need help. I've been constantly angry for the last week. I want to scream and smash things, but I haven't. For the past year I've been having thoughts to stab my leg. It's gotten especially worse since I accidentally cut my thumb open with a saw. (Two weeks ago) but since my reflex stop me from stabbing myself I haven't. I cut myself yesterday, because I was just angry, no other reason, and the cut needs to be glued back together because it's too wide. And to be honest it frightened me a bit, I thought I would have to go to the hospital and get stitches at First. That's the only reason I was frightened. Now, I want to strangle or stab someone. When I was 12 I would just punch people on the face, most notably my best friend, I didn't even feel 1% of remorse.  School is starting soon and I'll probably hurt someone there, even if I happen to make new friends I'll just lie and manipulate them. Can anyone tell me where I can get diagnosed and what might help.

 please take this seriously I'm not trying to be 'edgy'.",1.8071199999999976,4.0072510720000025,3.2252000000000014,89.7506,80.28,5.920000000000001,22.4,7.087006719466742,0.6788400000000001,968,31,203,12,25,316,147,250,0.23399999999999999,0.629,0.138,-0.9832,0,0,1,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,2,2,13,15,3,0,10,0,19,3,2,4,1,41,42,14,0,7,10,0,2,1,2,3,1,1,0,1,8,10,0,1,8,1,0,1,5,8,0,2,11,6,32,7,20,25,3,26,0,1,2,0,8,8,0,6,18,121,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770437125947893,0.0,0.12166690458333534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109956559944393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495716487083747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934276936366897,0.0,0.1481332294816845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750906515727164,0.0,0.1326489360480279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13130071616977154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332217766901672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605021173255992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287032836717575,0.08680119755520807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334971115313404,0.0,0.0,0.1877446000977073,0.0,0.12695977170046008,0.0,0.06905250155048318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744399617075563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628807300055556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007062046273846,0.0,0.13124322829825338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06677443279220684,0.09904051150584398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05935983869957151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110366347308015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12889463573936613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801846868194424,0.0,0.1173475840483788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240789989995628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159876002957112,0.08423432847695732,0.0,0.0,0.13337293162938124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309999242103952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498490001251307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296671535656335,0.09682152423952037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20101575451867376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30884526499689696,0.0935383313423596,0.0,0.0,0.0859998841115606,0.0,0.0,0.10158128157837927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451438768861888,0.0,0.09135453494638184,0.0,0.10619828018124776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072066427363543,0.0,0.0,0.2893775299448192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249201970471824,0.0,0.11868999662479315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14333029378546794,0.0,0.1949234754688908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382112430276584,0.17262335680097354,0.13284358441061364,0.0,0.07824343463427512
mentalhealth,MYMH,2020/01/29,"What do you wish someone had taught you about managing mental health? Hi Folks, I was wondering what are the key things that you wish you had been taught about mental health and mindfulness (i.e. what do you wish you knew growing up)? For instance, do you wish someone had told you about how to 'self-talk', or specific tips for dealing with panic attacks etc.

I think it would be great to share these learnings or tips with everyone, so that others might benefit and spread the knowledge. I might even start working on creating a service to share these learnings with the wider world :)

Yours mindfully,

Simon",6.383050458715597,8.244235871559631,4.98797018348624,83.56892775229359,66.43119266055047,8.385779816513761,31.05619266055045,8.841846274778883,2.5341091743119266,486,19,85,8,8,141,70,109,0.049,0.72,0.231,0.9655,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,9,0,1,6,6,1,1,4,0,13,2,0,1,0,23,24,6,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,10,5,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,9,0,12,4,13,11,1,5,0,0,0,0,14,3,0,5,1,60,22,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15347717498964936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908408740519065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504579333274371,0.08910537400747079,0.0,0.0,0.1289102485580039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873639996856533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868015087343785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27191079914552146,0.28623185579075483,0.2724369761329012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15828531475666652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073832791000204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22861399634712226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548848284430124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843383351925344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962679246956679,0.08644351402706414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289102485580039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6205495579703761,0.0,0.146301827306166,0.09821453414179168,0.0,0.0,0.09583467823650037,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stephyumbongo,2020/01/29,"Struggling with day to day Hi everyone 

Does anyone give that the just really can't cope some days? I struggle sometimes and cry over the smallest things I managed to overcome so much last year and got my confidence back but I seem to be letting old habits creep back does anyone know why this might happen? 

Thank you for any advice I really appreciate it 😊😊 xx",3.150142857142857,5.683848585714286,3.818571428571431,85.49642857142858,77.42857142857143,6.857142857142858,24.285714285714285,7.957251820313856,1.5094285714285718,291,10,54,5,7,92,57,70,0.076,0.7909999999999999,0.133,0.731,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,2,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,9,10,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,6,1,6,6,2,9,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,3,8,31,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17241269243165433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11998355687082868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467384182655656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713391081866198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19380831949758207,0.3413627922648697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088033073949204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16859360154633418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16925493642880166,0.0,0.0,0.14111319435072453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560231071011398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969654410712624,0.1438201191760391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804193076373973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18717231556395944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297018707623371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851414864075439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22606077326147805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062208226773614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17450120855211676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.368901587580348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243995377064518,0.0,0.0,0.11721724150342533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15920740937173958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361997149196952
mentalhealth,RyujiSawamuraGamer,2020/01/29,"Someone here in Reddit messaged me to kill myself because of my previous post in another mental illness subreddit I posted in another subreddit a long time ago wherein I shared my mentall illness and my concern about it, and then someone messaged me a few hourd ago telling me to kill myself because I'm retarded.

I already reported and blocked the user. It baffles me how people can be so damn evil and insensitive. I hope that person changes his ways because he's hurting people with his words.",8.528571428571425,8.612861417582419,8.624483516483519,65.64551648351652,61.1978021978022,10.796483516483518,46.771428571428565,10.355215969177356,5.454743296703295,403,26,59,8,5,132,62,91,0.304,0.647,0.048,-0.9819,0,0,0,0,0,2,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,4,0,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,9,4,7,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,15,2,8,3,1,11,0,1,0,0,8,3,1,1,5,40,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952498382848793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18377761726650435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34925693367948035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045580569593299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617396482317335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16540872470815166,0.0,0.0,0.17828120255545155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3684968245746951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14737992143415968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335660063234502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309114437049208,0.14541360292311953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31899264229904234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822123604921601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455605964873324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710900929774342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13218924453864125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_tellerteller_,2020/01/29,"I don't know what to do now I went to my universities councelling center for an appointment only to find out that my timing was booked wrong, and that it was booked for last week wednesday rather than this week. This is the second time this happened, and i only met up with this counceller once before before my univ went on break. As predicted, they booked my timing to someone else and there is no other free timings suitable for me next week. They also told me to fill out this disability forum "" in case i needed accomodation in classes"" and i told them i didn't want accomodation, but they made me fill it out anyway. It had the usual, mental disabilities, learning disabilities, etc. I couldn't fill it out because i didn't know if i had a mental disability or not, i was never tested, so one of the students working there was kinda looking over my shoulder as i filled it out, but i had no idea what to put so i kinda just closed it, mumbled something like ""nevermind"" and left. I could have explained, i know, but i already felt like i was going to cry.

Now i have no clue what to do, i cant trust that if i book again they're going to do it right this time, and i already feel embarrassed, it felt like the people working there didn't know what to do with me, but i don't have any other options.

Help?",5.859282051282051,5.740263800000001,6.419230769230772,79.9124358974359,66.76923076923077,8.625641025641025,29.64102564102564,8.021203637495839,1.872402564102564,1028,32,204,11,15,336,127,260,0.084,0.855,0.061,-0.5946,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,4,2,12,7,0,1,6,0,25,1,1,1,1,44,45,18,0,7,10,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,23,14,0,0,11,4,1,9,12,2,0,2,19,4,35,6,29,24,1,40,0,0,1,0,9,14,0,6,19,151,58,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25999080643104866,0.09420474348533373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010814671827614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180988270106142,0.0,0.20047851547893955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405384037015392,0.0,0.1293979416717021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984069159019328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137831480698714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05956329918925263,0.0,0.2262132496855516,0.0,0.10766720993105007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389708855751792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417029033866056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895896252912232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298203926377655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589595435415065,0.09602285103447547,0.0,0.0,0.12799021592818036,0.0,0.0,0.172653620085851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989224636694536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146535742472592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374297039679289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734732423174138,0.09085474370266856,0.0,0.1252818040380582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545332327959174,0.07982443549251025,0.17918465629044428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166779686769575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842169502573885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060069095477063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981169127191034,0.09068831652763447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3434510961477429,0.0,0.0,0.22512619763350156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974023093289702,0.0,0.0694815850586429,0.0,0.2834765425302824,0.0,0.0,0.21840385259825432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17151983547482227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879597977433144,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EPIKGUTS24,2020/01/29,"I don't have depression A psychiatrist I saw doesn't think I have depression. My GP doesn't think I have depression. A therapist I saw doesn't think I have depression. So, clearly, I don't have depression. But then why is everything boring and empty? Why haven't I cried in years? Why can't I remember much of anything, especially my childhood, even though I have a fantastic memory for interesting concepts? Why can I not concentrate on things that I need to do, and only things that are cool? Why can I get bored of the most stimulating activities? Why do I, someone who can get straight As, get Bs and Cs?
Figure that out, libtards.",3.191253443526172,5.707606685950411,4.7259710743801655,79.13925964187331,77.18181818181819,9.322589531680439,28.26515151515152,9.725611199111238,3.1604374655647387,503,22,95,16,12,168,66,121,0.05,0.669,0.281,0.9811,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,3,9,0,0,4,1,20,0,0,1,1,15,29,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,2,3,16,2,8,27,2,7,0,5,2,0,1,4,0,1,3,65,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183455734813172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593203113507726,0.0,0.0,0.5329224581503972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817347860983879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121726626921853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19396061477468474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096946292320404,0.09175802214194967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411638996390377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018304542460375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485179091983282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368166761907222,0.16442614809226766,0.2378793268294693,0.12158237550671187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6699832055844522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969004396947818
mentalhealth,JLinNV,2020/01/29,"I'm 38 years old, and be never actually been calm and happy And I just really realized this today. I do go to therapy, and we are in those ""tough"" stages.
My therapist asked me when was the last time I was actually truly happy. And I realized, in nearly 40 years, I've never been. At the same time, I don't feel like I'm classically ""depressed"". A lot of it I think is just purely environmental.
I suffered abuse and neglect throughout my childhood. I moved out about as early as I possibly and legally could, with a woman I thought it would go well with, but surprise surprise she also turned abusive once we lived together. Once I finally got the balls to leave that, I tried to flee everything altogether, and moved out of state. Literally right before I moved (like as I was packing the morning I was headed off) a friend dropped a bombshell that messed me up for quite a while.
When I finally started to work that out, I got into a relationship where the woman turned addict.
Once I started to work that out, I did FINALLY meet a genuinely good woman, then immediately got a long, traumatic illness that left me crippled. And that's where I remain today.
Not really sure if I just needed to vent or am looking for advice or what. I guess this is just something I've never thought about, or pushed out of my mind. Coming to the realization that this has been my life, it's hitting quite hard. I guess I just hope I can eventually overcome everything and actually experience no strings attached joy at some point in my life.",5.306815068493152,6.43712358561644,6.430027397260279,74.96668493150689,68.28082191780823,9.538630136986304,31.723287671232878,9.766711354998122,3.101325479452055,1205,50,221,27,20,404,157,292,0.12300000000000001,0.769,0.10800000000000001,-0.5446,0,0,1,0,1,0,38.0,2,0,0,4,14,18,0,0,14,0,19,5,1,0,5,54,42,23,0,5,11,0,2,2,1,1,4,0,0,3,15,21,0,1,6,1,0,8,6,5,1,0,13,3,36,13,33,25,3,54,0,3,1,0,10,20,0,9,25,153,51,3,0.0,0.20875858970823727,0.2579068167803667,0.0960375886382115,0.0,0.08608634247576241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045029915764423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235782090300578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496316463284335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588686012964177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033744741350786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587691239992217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15834991828561246,0.08617474310714465,0.0,0.0,0.0445439591622306,0.06293576407768124,0.0,0.2895144204451969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06806271221714824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001339167882062,0.07389070293560535,0.2113751361119916,0.0,0.19409524126908012,0.0,0.0,0.18755955321496087,0.07891666713525593,0.0,0.09041186008809224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874991557175968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718099570262286,0.0,0.09328089069555814,0.09571650712891748,0.0,0.12444954917870404,0.08607846226336525,0.0,0.07779033758958173,0.0779621432785232,0.07397841022739142,0.0,0.0,0.07489602610538851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895179587827676,0.0,0.0,0.2808961581298659,0.0,0.06532203045278666,0.2038350820860924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924418798904236,0.2814579339121241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327914760658726,0.09931494664222217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18740177293006247,0.0,0.0,0.11287304242428475,0.0,0.0,0.0945820810034083,0.0,0.07523345970718234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06782056606809457,0.0,0.0,0.12470953326906853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302939003217265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10074539613546056,0.10228618761202933,0.0,0.056448327417827016,0.0,0.139876687318788,0.10273891345353033,0.0,0.1670093190786198,0.0,0.0,0.05981136708540812,0.19164619179887105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920883869061532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826980121815615,0.0,0.0,0.06258083508014696,0.0,0.0,0.11346180655256995
mentalhealth,archoi-was-taken,2020/01/29,"I get very angry, nervous, agitated and upset when I need something and I can't find it anywhere. I need advice with this and possibly maybe an explanation as to why is happens. I'm normally very relaxed and comatose when it comes to things and I can be as happy as ever but the moment I reach into my pocket to lock up the house and it isn't there. After struggling to find it it makes me very emotional and causes me to get very angry and switches to like crying etc and being nervous and it bloody hate it lmao. Not sure if this is the place to present a problem like this and it might just me being stupid but better to then not right?",4.124991452991452,5.037035123076926,5.201794871794874,83.49542735042738,70.84615384615384,7.316239316239318,26.75213675213676,7.3871296695380915,1.3652649572649571,506,16,100,5,9,167,76,130,0.239,0.599,0.162,-0.9291,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,13,2,4,5,0,9,0,0,2,2,31,18,20,0,5,6,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,12,14,0,0,2,1,0,1,4,7,0,0,0,0,10,6,15,14,1,12,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,9,74,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15052065915324006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623093304030642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823578707159994,0.0,0.13268701955829318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16919958495353732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17326799769647258,0.0,0.0,0.17178910305726036,0.0,0.13933295768883008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815693510745072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095326094552806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13621213492335918,0.16397251159991905,0.0,0.1520771066309843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777350474830457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15050688072183993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028191759939472,0.0,0.15474828536681115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16340618498892434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22842915143594936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15092103367028642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609331914620125,0.0,0.0,0.1736506721326326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739014365536438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13154455886765234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858322720110492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16103022736357453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14517562434776216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233362872756112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5083781356403991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13899211167538306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pm_ur_hairy_balls,2020/01/29,"I don't feel anything for people. What's wrong with me? Outside of my partner whom I do love, and my first love which developed in high school, I don't feel anything for other people. I don't care about either of my parents or any of my three siblings. I've had many short-term friends whom I've lost because of motivation to stay connected, due to not feeling any platonic love for them. I have a 'best friend' who I've known for over 14 years, who knows everything about me. And while we get along really well, make each other laugh a lot, share many stories and memories, I wouldn't mind if he disappeared.   


I've taken psychopathy and sociopathy tests, but I really don't fit the mould. I don't enjoy harming others, and while I have manipulated many people in the past for my benefit, it's not something I actively try to do, if it can be avoided. I've felt this way for nearly all my life and I've been hoping it would go away on its own, but nothing has changed, which leads me to believe that it could be a mental illness or condition. Can anyone help?",5.275025399129174,5.5437287594339635,5.9652830188679244,81.34023947750364,68.00943396226414,9.353265602322207,30.45863570391873,9.265573868473778,2.449382002902757,835,30,169,15,13,273,126,212,0.122,0.711,0.16699999999999998,0.88,1,1,1,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,1,5,3,17,0,1,5,0,19,5,0,4,1,37,34,14,0,6,9,1,4,0,3,2,2,0,0,1,17,10,0,1,7,0,0,3,8,4,1,2,5,4,21,13,24,24,6,19,0,1,0,3,16,8,0,6,6,111,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17656422044121248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907732226192848,0.0,0.21366173882842288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12197024424077467,0.0,0.0,0.07913711949720574,0.0,0.0,0.14626278123209074,0.13623817102530172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13236022976242404,0.0,0.13733243749026575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036507751381408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11667392247598793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19692280846121046,0.0,0.12464764109656545,0.0,0.0,0.11042489885820668,0.0,0.0,0.20059735286773567,0.0,0.06782563682404245,0.0,0.07377974659571206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701566717571291,0.1371620485076508,0.0,0.12894063756314364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134572419334681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916957659988072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171395935322692,0.11036839473220783,0.3515030884689802,0.0,0.08665591549428656,0.3948515734975889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308281127077962,0.0,0.13108127934341895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456587381254032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14414984236455033,0.0,0.1239279615642314,0.2700027053391985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16633214268777366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13138485782562956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09994184466119099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13837093859554395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813931679988515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304514166272824,0.0,0.0,0.11672384810623004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222046439523884,0.14193788457490833,0.0,0.08359987908438903
mentalhealth,morwannneg,2020/01/29,"People with mental illnesses, do you have memory problems? for example you can't remember some things that you talked about with people, even if they're important. for example I tend to forget I talked about something with someone and then start the same serious topic again and when people tell me that we already talked about it and that they told me everything and that I agreed with them I get scared because I have no clue what they told me. it always turns out like I don't pay attention to them which is untrue 

this is just one example so I can explain my question better.

if someone understands what I'm talking about and has similar experience, would you mind telling me what were you diagnosed with because I don't know what to do with this anymore",9.007642357642359,7.997220853146857,8.220499500499502,72.51118881118884,60.74825174825176,12.087512487512488,37.9110889110889,11.20814326018867,4.210027772227772,614,25,109,14,7,192,85,143,0.099,0.828,0.07400000000000001,-0.5579999999999999,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,1,5,4,1,9,5,0,1,1,0,13,2,0,0,0,28,23,10,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,14,13,0,0,6,0,1,0,4,3,0,1,3,0,23,2,16,19,2,5,0,0,0,0,20,1,0,4,5,84,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650442306536182,0.0,0.12444669393600867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14832427710363327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18234193749256944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322745089460383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180121901515492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987835988832877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344157407692901,0.14629931048600445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813942501786376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219478838678662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306792699786882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072226346624934,0.0,0.15101392744859554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134637238963076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110601998947102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310963332924634,0.0,0.0,0.1675424959407216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16942340453173202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973660502631947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25344502018886184,0.11513932847117613,0.0,0.0,0.10586001228696144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4808457148654156,0.2614457300955788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936165147308676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28582379968308325,0.0,0.0,0.16267936930535984,0.0,0.15569822657558813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062438098652688,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,toot-flarf,2020/01/29,"My brother (17m) is depressed. I need advice. TW: depression, suicide, brief mention of self harm. 

Cross posted to: r/advice , r/internetparents , r/depression, r/mentalhealth

Back story: When I was an adolescent I was seriously depressed.  In and out of hospitals, taking eight medications a day, self harming,  I had several serious suicide attempts along with some not so serious suicide attempts and so on. It took a huge toll on our parents and I think it’s part of the reason why their marriage is falling apart. During this part of my life I had basically no relationship with my mother because due to my depression she became absolutely crazy and impossible to interact with. I moved from Florida to Spain in the middle of April 2019 I have since then made a whole life here. Since then my life has significantly improved and I have a better relationship with my mother. I think it’s important to mention that I am overseas from where my family lives. 

In mid October 2019 my brother called me while I was at work hysterically crying saying that he’s super frustrated with school and our parents. He’s always had a history of disliking school, in fact when he was in the fifth grade he was diagnosed with ADHD but no longer takes Adderall nor any of the other medications because he doesn’t like the way it makes him feel. Anyway, when I spoke to him in October high felt that he was kind of depressed and I kind of saw myself in him when I was his age. Since moving I’ve been the referee between my brother and our parents, mostly my mother. Whenever my brother needs to communicate something important he will call me and I will relay the information to my parents. So on that occasion I called my parents and I had them know that Yayo (brother) was becoming increasingly stressed and depressed because of school and that he needed therapy. They proceeded to find him a therapist and he dropped out of regular high school to go to a special high school where he only goes a few hours a day and they give him the bare minimum to get his credits. 

Forward to yesterday, I wake up to find a message from our father. It was a message explaining that he had had a meeting at Yayo’s school He was explaining that he had had a meeting with the academic director Regarding how many credits my brother needs. At one point my brother is called into the office and they start telling him that he only has four credits left that it’s so easy that it’s just one little push and he can be over with it. Whenever I ask a question my brother would only respond with monosyllables he had put on my dad would call an ass face (cara de culo) like he didn’t want to be there and didn’t care what anyone had to say.  My mom and sends me a message telling me that my father had a meeting at school with the academic director and my brother and that I should speak to my brother and explain to him that he only has a little bit left to go because I’m the only one he listens to. 

Yayo then calls me I could tell by his voice (his faking a phone smile voice) that he wants okay. He started crying and venting telling me that he feels like mom and dad don’t understand him. He feels like he’s a fuck up I’m not mom always compares him to me because I was a fuck up but then I wasn’t. And he just feels like shit whenever She makes those comparisons. And then dad is always telling him that he only has a little bit left to go and that makes him feel like even more of a fuck up because getting those last four credits should be just so easy but for him it feels just as impossible as jumping across the Atlantic ocean. He’s telling me that he’s always bullshitting school and that he spends half the time asleep. That mom and dad think that it’s just because he’s lazy when in reality he’s completely capable of doing shit he doesn’t like like going to work, and then he says it’s just because school isn’t for him he feels like he isn’t capable of completing it.  I asked him what exactly does he want, and he says that he doesn’t know he quite frankly isn’t even thinking about his future. He stars saying that he wished that he could just stay in bed and never have to get up, that he just wants to quit life. He can’t imagine himself in the future. I asked him if he was having suicidal ideation and he said that he had thought of offing himself but not seriously enough to plan anything. I then asked him how long he had been having these thoughts. He said less than 3 months. I told him that I was not asking for his permission but that I didn’t want his consent to tell our parents. I gave him the example of if he told me that he had stage to lung cancer I would have to tell mom and dad it’s not something I can keep to myself same with suicidal ideation. And he told me that although he completely understands that it’s something that I have to tell them he wishes that I wouldn’t because that’s only going to make him look like a fuck up even more. He told me that it’s OK that he’s not going to lose trust in me and that he gets it. 

I then spoke with my parents and the conversation that I had with them made me feel very scared. The conversation I had with him made me feel very scared because the impression that I got from them was that of annoyance. That they don’t have time to deal with this shit. I know they love him but when I told my mother that he doesn’t like it when she compares him to me she just came up with excuses like “oh I’m not comparing him I’m just giving him good examples” I told her that’s besides the point whatever term she wants to use for what she does whether it be example or comparison that she should not use my name in conversations regarding his future if she knows that hurts him. Then my dad told me that he just feels irritated at the whole situation that he definitely needs a new therapist because this therapist isn’t working out. Our dad acted like it’s just another problem another excuse for him not to get his credits out. He said “Yayo is sick in the head”.  My mom said “I just don’t understand why he can’t tell us this shit why does he tell you and not us?!?”  I feel like the conversation that I had with them was absolutely fruitless and it was more of a burden than anything else. 

I thought my parents had learned from the situation that I was in and how it was the worst time if our lives when I was sick. I don’t want to lose my brother to suicide. Our birthdays are 3 years and 364 days apart (mine on the 20th and his on the 21st) we’ve always celebrated our birthdays together and I would hate to live in a world in which I can’t share my birthday with the person I love most in this world. He’s my best friend I love him I adore him he’s my baby brother and I don’t want this to get so bad that I lose him.  I don’t know what to do Im scared and I just want to help. 

TDLR: my brother is depressed just like I was when I was an  adolescent, my parents seem absolutely clueless as to how serious it is.

*names and dates changed for privacy reasons*",5.1524436674436656,5.570971645299146,5.794096089096088,81.93857226107228,68.3019943019943,9.230821030821033,31.054260554260555,9.218907990703514,2.481097150997152,5546,212,1137,100,88,1804,419,1404,0.13,0.743,0.127,-0.9325,10,0,3,0,0,4,92.0,11,1,11,14,45,76,11,4,57,2,103,27,10,15,3,196,216,91,6,31,37,41,12,15,1,10,10,15,1,3,88,70,0,1,39,0,6,20,36,38,0,7,70,29,185,38,143,130,20,132,0,11,2,8,262,63,9,10,61,724,273,23,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035097591879008086,0.05707571768112299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150054192816045,0.0,0.0,0.019859754875793258,0.061245983776644135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020420150198041217,0.0,0.04806488821874357,0.0,0.13650921852139056,0.0,0.0,0.02245611114281263,0.024384161191552397,0.19582769033837905,0.03225357784750649,0.0,0.0,0.0306478478428731,0.0258286082368552,0.06376651579249888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17892359638206856,0.03340165218732697,0.029775474462682895,0.0,0.030894011688624882,0.0,0.09185966973024393,0.0,0.0,0.04663411379237661,0.0,0.06415855336336004,0.05650258714529659,0.030108092334637838,0.2012272379615883,0.02964149515322712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666998065784628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02439623568834003,0.0,0.0,0.030175589512867543,0.0,0.05786699711334295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027530978450733115,0.0,0.16243089210606354,0.12518027131498305,0.0280404669965154,0.0,0.05338394370577549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022562975934372037,0.10799469142883884,0.09154746198889467,0.05603037010500913,0.09958400485857273,0.02449497085556709,0.023357145950945898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028832952408862925,0.029971779802737183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019574858554524042,0.09256704404153868,0.0,0.0,0.028760105711221867,0.0,0.031263538634317765,0.0,0.03154538452878729,0.0,0.0,0.02595790073511356,0.0,0.06082304631222079,0.08024890832214697,0.02380519787489263,0.0,0.0,0.09519085457460492,0.0,0.08251073434170586,0.21401434896390292,0.08781038830079113,0.0773631313439576,0.025844664505482243,0.024524046063553587,0.09801558269825424,0.0,0.0,0.07907338369726481,0.08290073230814254,0.07797571833992205,0.029608322087710408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058840014206325876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20522057646323708,0.02331039341366813,0.06207856499283924,0.0,0.10827216203112218,0.0225239630818518,0.028205452657091925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05936825854510067,0.15547696757748986,0.0,0.0,0.29184876469665505,0.06325027864489051,0.0,0.0,0.025499849270582995,0.0,0.0,0.055214532071175056,0.0,0.02796940634691233,0.0,0.0,0.027944330949578683,0.0,0.029358135614571224,0.032715218715672345,0.06212420215035646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060053252920365424,0.0,0.06270843896711653,0.0,0.0,0.1111189536303797,0.11612116026891953,0.08771504367903449,0.2660045118834304,0.0,0.02658626952450595,0.0609323848729332,0.03299226294450368,0.11991014714186644,0.07247367374519541,0.06565314970672316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744811146378478,0.0,0.0,0.04134155261047365,0.031127630678220025,0.0,0.0,0.033453139638345605,0.0,0.0,0.1916669386079808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04391562095353462,0.0,0.2807818880148446,0.0,0.03339737536833668,0.10172445591702776,0.0,0.07485110196611253,0.0,0.06955425871843983,0.051087347747321266,0.0,0.0,0.19534004336605745,0.03244677316896024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120733532341936,0.07025775067056644,0.05044584367989415,0.0,0.048192798098775934,0.1550277435888145,0.023180814883664903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07905633589284461,0.06521055589254922,0.06716643053191397,0.0,0.0,0.06378268681297353,0.0,0.0,0.08298287446209107,0.0,0.0,0.01880645016428699
mentalhealth,mel_is_me7,2020/01/29,"Starting a partial inpatient program tomorrow..... And freaking out a bit. My depression has been unbearable for the last 6 weeks and my anxiety is through the roof so I know this is good and I need it, but man am I scared.",1.8195348837209333,4.414959325581396,3.4058604651162803,85.96181395348837,83.65116279069767,8.091162790697675,31.85581395348837,8.841846274778883,3.243617674418605,173,10,34,5,5,57,35,43,0.218,0.737,0.045,-0.7579,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,8,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,1,3,7,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,24,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915358777457373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160559609977119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3282357159887056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196435782092004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20943930372257044,0.3106424854953179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28257638268802904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3815415905801559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697403047150875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056906309367605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ceasersalad_123,2020/01/29,"Bipolar Last month I was diagnosed with bipolar after a breakdown in chemistry at college. It was a whole thing the police were called and blah blah blah.. anywaysss fast forward to now and I’m on the proper medication and I am getting the help I need. However, I am afraid of the medication and or myself..
Some back story into my life I had a rough childhood dad killed himself, mom was an addict, lived on my own since 14-15 the whole shabang. So it’s no wonder I have mental issues I’ve just tried to be as normal as possible when finally going off to college. When I finally thought I was  getting my life in order I had a huge breakdown. According to my doctors my Prozac made me delusional and I wasn’t in my right mind. Anyways here I am I think I’m in the right mind thinking about how I’m legit crazy. That my binges I go on that are so fun aren’t so fun after all.. they’re me being crazy. The more I think about it the more sense it makes that I am bipolar. I know this is exactly what they tell you to avoid thinking. That your medication will help you. But what if I’m never happy again? What if those manic episodes allow me to be happy and I’m giving that up? Why live if I can never be happy? I rather see through the eyes of a delusional happy person than to feel like this all the time. I can’t tell what’s real and what’s not anymore.. that happiness I felt was real it was there.
I just don’t know what to do anymore and how to process what I’m feeling. Do others feel like this too?",0.2532692307692308,2.6061616346153897,2.2776410256410284,92.62569230769232,89.70512820512822,4.786666666666667,20.3,6.385866456164764,0.2574292307692305,1178,39,248,13,40,392,157,312,0.106,0.8059999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.688,2,1,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,3,1,0,19,12,1,2,16,0,28,13,1,5,5,49,55,22,1,6,9,2,5,5,0,1,12,0,0,1,24,10,0,1,12,0,0,3,8,3,0,0,13,7,37,9,31,37,8,34,0,0,2,0,14,15,0,6,19,178,61,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211198556494032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185787045454044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202493818583339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564553784824352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950710852190529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587320427941944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420841207950498,0.133832927797225,0.08993600402500353,0.20521751077216244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787536599557177,0.08985491561022779,0.1064674072998327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4985568323305574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556742068292406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776509425061296,0.0,0.0,0.10362980416943504,0.0,0.10295500631654443,0.07635195134797165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232100836237545,0.09152294243039527,0.0,0.1654211843856877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863096081183168,0.06252414162131516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830820767972056,0.0943953497038636,0.0,0.18915602995646533,0.10970287212111966,0.07476493298548126,0.0,0.0,0.06945366210510638,0.14448512819991127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177478803556796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178731641385044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559663712629287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21322946386429945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15998398253334964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746412977454798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748316762418969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373998474671542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062228881269791314,0.2400747822258741,0.0,0.0743619580567269,0.054618585265844684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635944481639609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452083369301548,0.2091540350577557,0.0,0.0,0.10157898983253576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Concretefacts,2020/01/29,"How can I find good psychiatrist? I think I have mild-cognitive impairment, but I don’t know how to communicate effectively. Im just hoping that there’s maybe someone that can help here. Long story short. For one whole year I was sleep deprived, drug-abuse and some severe emotional trauma. I was able to stop doing drugs and get better sleep. After all that, I have had a couple of Depersonalization episodes, am always tired, have bad memory, anxiety and feel like I lack certain cognitive capacities. I went to a psychiatrist and she prescribed me adderall which  I find weird (I thought maybe I didn’t explain my symptoms correctly) but decide do give it a shot either way. I try and it makes my anxiety and cognitive Incapacities worse. I stop taking it. I decide my brain maybe just needs time to heal (I don’t know obviously). It’s been 9 months. I have never had another DP episode. My anxiety is significantly better. However, my memory still sucks and still feel like I’m missing cognition abilities (for example I was a great speed reader, now it’s hard to concentrate and I have to read things over to understand  them). Its also a little hard concentrating on anything. I also get incredibly irritable when I don’t get enough sleep. It feels like there’s a sting on my brain that makes me so angry. However, I’m so relaxed when I get 8+ hours of it. Im debating whether to go back to a psychiatrist or whether I should just wait and see if it gets better. It’s been 9 months and it’s gotten somewhat better, but I still feel uncomfortable feeling like I’m lacking some mental capacities. What should I do? Thank you for your help.",3.562593783494105,6.0745230353697774,5.033707395498394,77.43759217577708,75.88102893890675,8.648274383708468,26.765380493033234,9.2995712137729,2.6499143837084684,1308,51,239,35,30,437,165,311,0.18100000000000002,0.625,0.19399999999999998,0.7835,2,0,2,0,1,0,42.0,0,2,1,5,19,20,1,0,7,0,25,9,5,5,5,58,58,25,0,7,11,0,7,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,18,10,0,3,16,2,0,2,5,6,0,1,11,8,37,14,18,45,9,26,0,2,1,0,8,5,1,6,22,152,55,1,0.08595944447915033,0.10184788551541224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13748347338736924,0.07152514387417806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013597247842277,0.19727621923561195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073729858700166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609750684461513,0.07177254561169595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040965728865896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19191833706770067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511249034141556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993713305567484,0.0,0.0,0.09669280521412388,0.0,0.08881908455487114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173183896048829,0.2456377772456565,0.0,0.0,0.15713074993460752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22455130947561056,0.0824601318538518,0.04885273323367652,0.07209870371089137,0.0,0.09477059100176036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540055561954641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152336073741013,0.0,0.0,0.08537712394662139,0.08465273760046263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857019015044275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448212530411698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798177037303544,0.08615394572444353,0.0,0.0760714033780799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475719335171672,0.0,0.2590734471417744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662690215787193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372240169646418,0.0,0.0,0.06373783889312389,0.06629722281398044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05824834422698087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598270632561583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849854804308876,0.0,0.0,0.0971097048783372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580645700857838,0.0,0.07283315835824329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059419701981716,0.14373188918740387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934477609728862,0.06463080446346181,0.0,0.0,0.07913990746081209,0.0,0.0,0.057107635345000476,0.0550793411319975,0.0,0.06824219715332225,0.05012364334333363,0.098797736283671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058360820275215476,0.0,0.0,0.08948681322542562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823060594475175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796852662229948,0.0,0.09597064997223446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760001764504641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055355063953481096
mentalhealth,wetsoup,2020/01/29,"girlfriend admitted to me that she cut herself the other week but isn't sure what's wrong with her. As someone who has had lots of experience around very close friends with very severe mental illnesses but has never experienced such a thing, I need help here...

just got off facetime with my lovely girlfriend of only about 4.5 months. shes taking pre-med and lives with a very cool family. they are Czech people who grew up in Soviet Russia essentially so they have some semi-traditional views on things but her dad is a pharmacist so I'd be hard pressed to find out he doesn't believe in mental illness. her mom is lovely and I can only imagine she'd be supportive too.

my girlfriend has never ever told anyone that she harms herself, not even her absolute best friends that she spends so much time around so the fact that she told me means so much and I'm happy she trusts me that much. 

I've had my suspicions that something was up because she never accepts my Compliments and always says she's gross and so on but I made no quick judgements. tonight she spilled pretty much everything to me and told me she felt numb when she did it and because she hasn't been doing well on her exams, she did it as ""punishment."" which were her words, not mine. since she's taking pre-med to become a pediatrician, she is very swamped with homework and Its making her very stressed but she said she'll feel like a failure if she stops and does something like nursing instead. 

**main question and tldr**

tldr: girlfriend told me she made small cuts on her hip, I noticed them last time we had sex and I asked what happened but I really didn't think too much of it but she told me she made them a few days later but she said she doesn't know why

question: what possible mental illnesses could she be experiencing? she's actually usually very happy and lovely from what I see. she only feels terrible like this when she can't learn new things from studying or going to class etc etc.",4.378110236220472,6.160526902887138,4.693708661417322,84.03111417322835,71.30971128608924,7.494698162729659,26.61076115485564,8.131152278815165,1.654555485564304,1574,53,299,23,30,495,200,381,0.14400000000000002,0.693,0.163,0.9365,0,0,2,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,4,1,21,27,3,1,8,1,31,9,1,4,6,64,62,32,0,3,13,2,5,3,6,1,4,3,1,0,22,22,0,1,13,0,1,2,12,9,1,0,21,13,62,18,30,35,12,34,0,0,2,4,70,14,0,6,21,208,84,4,0.0,0.0,0.07331815884603506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251598319071693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253415936562101,0.0,0.0,0.13376711843181804,0.0702384357718096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159974555137493,0.08297757765341532,0.0,0.08464822595020652,0.07884657591525664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059986923261666825,0.0,0.0,0.048454033375092964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574866726208407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16758445710579864,0.04962408893306276,0.06796134811718768,0.0,0.0,0.06752394880672083,0.07349367786226196,0.07082792219427593,0.0,0.07597816407316471,0.0536744364342287,0.07213866438762437,0.0,0.06866944118935933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160938545508518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042699342975522185,0.0,0.060090058878742476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643912878089911,0.15995918162275627,0.06730366582225407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035950905794508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04129067512066759,0.06124274536480704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101173478741384,0.0,0.06634308157434275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638746831993355,0.2034291472121239,0.2132756243399428,0.05015130611418304,0.0,0.0,0.08184095762108973,0.0,0.0,0.2271466647599652,0.0,0.0,0.08799388809962877,0.059969780368531865,0.0,0.2761539445922077,0.055709551201527666,0.1738396810912103,0.07256311684765579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553847220148915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714241999730282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05208718585409785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470023155573593,0.0,0.07643642621655458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16833044781963846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048131591230563486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293579532826794,0.059748116249148886,0.0,0.0,0.059870611173929125,0.0,0.0,0.08487796527203245,0.0,0.06215010646211822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365924284836799,0.11568082840345707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06281385734935711,0.08606364556563356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525909484762208,0.07081117998271909,0.0,0.1129800813137259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497434235534001,0.048141660091184105,0.0,0.0,0.0876203436995979,0.0,0.0,0.3589600352437368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274746938873867,0.3719514466410461,0.0,0.0,0.060266493944046824,0.0,0.06755284280144623,0.0,0.06779509632035176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214523218539119,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AcceptableTower2,2020/01/29,"Need advice on how to support my suicidal sister My sister has expressed her will to not live anymore a few days ago. Since then, it seems her longing for death has somewhat diminished. Our mother has been staying home from work and has been with my sister these past few days.

What I'm wondering most is, how long do we have to keep an eye on her? I fully expect someone wanting to commit suicide to say they are all right at some point just to get people to leave them alone.

She is talking to a psychologist and psychiatric and just recently got a new diagnosis and hopefully the correct medication. Should we wait until her psychologist and/or psychiatric give us the 'green light' that she's not suicidal anymore? Should we trust and respect her own wishes when she says she's okay, even though she might be lying? How do you trust someone in these situations?

Any other tips on how to best support her would be greatly appreciated. I unfortunately live in a city about 2,5 hours away but have been texting her every day this best week just trying to show her I care about her. Luckily she lives with my parents right now and they look after her, but they are not mental health care experts by any means.",7.385703151474075,7.578319911894276,7.02264317180617,75.81462216197903,63.53744493392071,9.803998644527276,32.880040664181635,9.466822959209583,2.8873005083022703,968,35,175,16,13,304,143,227,0.073,0.765,0.162,0.9737,1,1,0,0,0,3,18.0,5,1,4,3,13,12,0,0,7,1,22,3,1,4,3,43,40,16,4,8,8,5,0,0,0,5,2,2,1,0,7,11,0,2,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,6,33,12,26,29,9,27,0,0,3,0,36,10,0,7,16,127,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337731556735892,0.09377695267481427,0.0,0.0,0.1095671203876864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388242358023245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20983162705582206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939371806010187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22204134203719084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21572106280949305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20467848741999725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987367032851766,0.0,0.08913311356984263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055271203773502586,0.10148394951531474,0.0,0.0,0.08461037883794807,0.1166344711866955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11245042341299892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611656214910037,0.10507390106673677,0.1041823964604447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403151479416363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201693319185964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802450207251072,0.18724264166016108,0.0888374304135616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152369386549313,0.0,0.10657286432347407,0.10661200713138244,0.11222707132886374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784423633460744,0.0,0.10217318672514064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174679027624717,0.0,0.10098906457187007,0.07334185737130132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000627828660212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10445542009014776,0.0,0.0,0.1806891286515815,0.0,0.16825780653320752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630775699567627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751104842799375,0.11891302730771793,0.0,0.0,0.17927200453593806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275866621475095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3471531222262677,0.24009975856388502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503044872631857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393869280685117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718248492371974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272530238288379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06239801606939944,0.0,0.08485880990948061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165392861853094,0.0,0.11472535482308485,0.07701679114794037,0.0,0.0,0.07515058196798947,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Blu3Dog4,2020/01/29,"Can't sleep I can't sleep
Lost my appetite
Don't feel like gaming anymore (my past distraction from reality)
Can seem to enjoy social life anymore
Just want to sleep
I haven't self harmed in a while and was proud of it but that streak ended too
On meds but they don't work
Family upset about GPA
I don't know what to do anymore
Goodnight... I just want to sleep.",0.4064000000000014,2.8328531733333366,1.8096666666666683,95.4465,90.6,4.6000000000000005,16.833333333333336,6.2581,-0.33966666666666656,288,7,62,3,10,92,51,75,0.047,0.773,0.18,0.7528,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,1,3,4,7,0,2,1,0,9,5,4,0,0,10,15,4,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,2,1,7,3,9,13,0,5,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,4,36,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4919980431453096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14646582765341087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15589302334939667,0.0,0.08361438073401077,0.11813801553228614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088122284658516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168034025590988,0.08078982483880741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805173059222173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836851431203255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578612428310348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15054364824606492,0.17251355077570182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6619445707085467,0.16857054266807384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950751481591602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038893934718788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Void-Of-Rainbows,2020/01/29,"I always think about dying I have no intentions of killing myself, but every day I think about dying.
Whether I kill myself, I get into an accident or I save somebody.
Is it wrong?
What should I do?",1.0684615384615377,3.623828153846155,2.8827692307692345,88.2872307692308,87.97435897435898,5.171282051282052,20.620512820512825,6.742157984588678,0.6527497435897436,154,5,29,2,5,51,29,39,0.392,0.522,0.086,-0.9452,0,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,9,7,3,4,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,9,1,4,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,24,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22133132201801406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715464544690513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5521270518209551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.224114460705164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13897277375503694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5885738942634152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3408810588363539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908266319927143,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cyber_0tter,2020/01/29,How do you know when to give up I don’t mean I want to hurt myself or anything! I just know that a lot of times my depression makes it hard for me to think through things.. I moved halfway across the country for school and a chance at a job in what I’m studying. I’m going through school but haven’t been able to get a job. I’m low on money unemployed and just plain down... my depression is getting bad again and I just want to curl up in bed all day... I feel like I don’t see a light at the end of a tunnel.. how do I know when I should just give up and go back home... I know this is my dream but I don’t know what to do anymore... I am in the biggest area for my career choice (cyber) and still can’t even find an internship.,1.0278977544194952,2.1157333664596294,2.5791304347826087,98.62983277591974,78.68944099378882,5.9476349737219305,20.459149546106072,6.297961479604792,-0.20100038222646965,556,13,144,4,13,182,91,161,0.121,0.8140000000000001,0.065,-0.892,4,0,0,0,0,2,22.0,0,1,0,0,12,6,0,0,10,0,13,0,0,3,1,29,34,12,0,3,7,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,6,5,0,0,9,1,1,3,5,5,0,0,1,4,19,1,24,32,2,25,0,4,1,0,3,14,0,2,9,94,25,6,0.15368210278690372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524113503517114,0.0,0.0,0.1264672760298293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11817205081305596,0.12831813652134272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991122424944027,0.0,0.26473233987553796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361167278044094,0.0,0.0,0.1015055794803189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770628879958097,0.10979052493810013,0.0,0.0,0.14046265776118888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605851114225615,0.2948517533162762,0.17468216123849184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376689778557509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541556795680096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16451986956223286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050115469570505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4222983227873913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508131263882405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13065502806542253,0.0,0.0,0.10258399697134386,0.0,0.0,0.16740486338718585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333975393338224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110689854324709,0.1224647386322393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273072580488645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10209956030062667,0.09847328605451504,0.0,0.0,0.0896132700137762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812913719794003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fivrwr0ngedpaws,2020/01/29,"My mind, feelings, all out Now I just need to say two things to start this out: 1. I'm mostly just rambling. I hate being public about this but feel like this could potentially be the place to just come out and say it, and maybe feel good. 2. This might not be the right place. Seems like it could work though...

For the longest time, I can't ever remember being real. Someone will say a joke, but I can almost choose to react to it or not. Someone can straight up offend me, I'll realize it should offend me, but it just... Doesn't? Someone will compliment me and I don't really feel it, but I know that I should respond. When I get sad, I don't really go crazy. My mind goes blank, but in a bad way. When I feel ""sad"", I really just get this sense of feeling heavy, and my blood pressure rises, pulse slows. Its just the strangest feeling. I've never attempted suicide, because I've always had enough control to resist. But its like every time this happens, I get overly sad, I feel my control slip. And on top of that, its like everything I say is a lie. As I look back I feel like all of this is just a lie to feel better for myself! I don't get it! I say something out of nothing but kindness, and think about just how fucking manipulative it is! If I want something I can easily word things in a way to prompt the answer, but its like I can't turn it off. Idk I'm going on and on here maybe this will help, my hands are going numb from how hard my heart is beating rn its crazy",2.0016742081447987,3.590571359477128,3.3836601307189547,91.76570135746609,77.23529411764707,6.145600804424332,21.57315233785821,6.844919456158928,0.3563447963800903,1140,30,253,11,26,373,146,306,0.127,0.708,0.165,0.9125,0,0,2,0,0,1,49.0,0,0,0,7,19,21,4,1,10,0,27,5,3,6,4,72,58,23,1,7,20,0,12,6,0,6,1,5,0,0,26,12,0,2,17,1,0,5,9,10,0,1,1,18,31,11,30,45,4,34,0,3,1,1,8,17,1,6,16,166,57,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875794365791137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375374246632915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815698974419146,0.07400885280999675,0.05403277448878519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839292277770532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635360813949364,0.0,0.0,0.1988296385309553,0.1415401266614131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09158653214146167,0.0,0.0,0.08017795627413088,0.0746811615596079,0.0,0.07966193086026661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4481793023251042,0.12664571073668368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194420918800029,0.18523834894956626,0.0,0.1511246972965671,0.07434517342605429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838210556242738,0.0,0.07940205020772192,0.08751146755232407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503620872329174,0.05941204268450149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230261903649646,0.048713011676073066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259823683534113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443342016833049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17809714892216885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403068859145328,0.17899780157437986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572379865957811,0.06836292851443558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505035072636319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852152513250207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008892110692364,0.17035091521878518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040933792927753,0.075696188927137,0.0,0.35244164402283384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069251562722288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253075371933311,0.13647540342334566,0.0,0.0,0.06273828445542877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096955356502038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777401909195677,0.0567955172269287,0.08708617929879199,0.0,0.10337081709675468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964124632712374,0.08658624191400698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228086546563186,0.14071310497531345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452936728183531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slimmmmshadddy,2020/01/29,"First Time Talking About My OCD, I’ve never really been able to talk about my OCD with anyone because I’m afraid people will look at me like I’m crazy, because I feel that way. 

For about a year now I’ve been having terrible OCD. I’m not really quite sure how or why it started, probably the stress of life and a lot of change. For the last year I’ve basically been living on egg shells needing every single thing in my room to remain in its exact spot, inability to throw things away or get rid of old clothes, only able to wear the same five things. On top of that every time I leave my house (room) I do the same routine over and over and over until I feel less anxious. 

These compulsions and bad habits are finally catching up to me and affecting my everyday life. I’m late to work almost everyday and every other activity in my life. I can’t settle into my room because I’m too afraid to get rid of things and move things around.

I’ve been seeing a therapist for the last six months but it doesn’t really seem to help. I’m on here seeking advice from other people who also experience and live with OCD.

Thank you for listening and any advice you might have, I’m so sick of living like this.",5.00604938271605,5.263104831275721,5.927176954732512,81.42162962962962,68.58847736625515,9.11374485596708,26.076543209876537,9.029198982220553,1.7915412345679005,946,24,193,16,15,313,135,243,0.08199999999999999,0.862,0.055999999999999994,-0.4875,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,4,10,9,0,3,8,0,12,6,1,2,3,31,30,16,0,1,4,0,2,2,0,2,4,1,3,0,15,13,1,0,3,0,0,3,4,5,0,3,4,5,16,4,39,24,5,39,0,0,2,0,7,18,0,6,19,118,31,1,0.21172615313951595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20689634642152427,0.0,0.0,0.10600657929488468,0.0,0.0,0.08465866408555932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199052226701383,0.0,0.0,0.11959514379709063,0.0,0.07402192457670673,0.0,0.0,0.09424058242267434,0.0,0.0,0.09946184523667026,0.0,0.0883912470320855,0.19359944667411694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198909806778257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675826235412233,0.0,0.0,0.10355440241697733,0.0,0.0,0.1070551046864356,0.0,0.0,0.11596782583586734,0.0,0.0900470788500584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061817634068986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709577887268269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221517769127665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17258507352192834,0.1194181614417378,0.11209371266580584,0.0,0.0,0.22432266517301264,0.10343870372287876,0.0,0.2804371083377047,0.0,0.08889832202145985,0.0,0.0,0.09000100200016511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230399483724432,0.0,0.0,0.08449889772531738,0.11251569677903056,0.0,0.07849612989030298,0.08164813090225419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108549077370146,0.0,0.0,0.08051364010423105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467842557780827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413830162763275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259841287560365,0.0,0.0,0.20345579288876092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08435916588736928,0.09637376897001236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493043047033952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12126579653665773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997746968289473,0.0,0.0,0.17017746184940438,0.0,0.0974644977525374,0.0,0.12291519129340278,0.35165362048797183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345922255227253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402918266046053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955249606559746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706958056594056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634470090724213
mentalhealth,Pabbstar,2020/01/29,"New to anxiety Hi everyone, I'm Pablo, and a couple of months ago I was diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Chronic Fatigue.

I used to laugh at mental health memes before, thinking that I was immune to this thing, and usually I made jokes about anxiety; without realising that I was feeding my own without knowing it. 

After a couple of months, shit just got worse, and I started sleeping less, I got easily annoyed by anything, I was really sad and I felt like the whole world was crashing on me. 


But now, after two anxiety attacks during schooltime and trying to express the hell I was going through to my family and going to therapy and start medication has made me more aware of this, and that not everyone is having the time of their lifes. 

I would love to hear your story.",9.191632653061227,7.909641360544218,9.37687074829932,65.2383673469388,60.564625850340136,12.75374149659864,40.72789115646259,11.765960540728905,4.987560544217686,628,29,104,16,7,209,95,147,0.193,0.705,0.102,-0.9154,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,0,3,10,4,0,5,0,10,11,2,3,0,23,25,10,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,1,7,1,0,0,7,10,1,0,3,1,0,2,3,6,0,1,11,2,17,4,21,13,4,16,1,2,0,1,6,3,2,0,12,78,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482565829957665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3963780860860539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659691448412532,0.0,0.0,0.14736565665081447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022541288712293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866577661804887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314760957999274,0.0,0.0,0.14845923289041932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475539887810825,0.0,0.0,0.1221148103880396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12437466821599212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14723634435717384,0.0,0.20720320232058975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376904828549794,0.14599624488169266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118948017879255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149495628302863,0.06328464179800053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691110402791932,0.2451397849869221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049367625805733,0.1305416048647946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067884566380089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510646903789546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298394128622195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296662256332764,0.0,0.0,0.12962933491625572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18337219170068111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813546012760825,0.0,0.08605782017211833,0.08300130106422217,0.0,0.0,0.0755333583530986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879462955522549,0.0,0.12653764036357032,0.0,0.0,0.1118773284222109,0.14266536729369936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14462207876787714,0.0,0.2497357498794653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200803220145538,0.09201850561292806,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OnionMain,2020/01/29,"I Think I’m Depressed So I’m a 15 y.o. guy from California U.S. and got hit by a car over half a year ago which broke my leg. It’s changed my perception of people and generally the world to be a horrible place where people don’t care enough to watch where they’re driving in a machine that can possibly kill. Since getting hit, I haven’t felt motivation to really do anything besides just staying home and playing games with my friends. I know my GPA will fall and will ruin my life if nothing changes. I’ve already tried to get therapy about this but nothing my therapist did helped me. I haven’t wanted to do my schoolwork and haven’t wanted to study for tests and stuff. I don’t know how to change this. I want to but I just don’t know how. I’m feeling lost and alone. I’m not going to kill myself since I fear death and whatnot but I want help. I just don’t know how to get it. Can anyone please suggest something?",1.9193040935672518,3.956250415789477,3.1214035087719303,91.484269005848,79.05263157894737,6.116959064327485,24.76608187134503,7.1686216300943375,0.9475204678362577,729,27,157,9,18,235,112,190,0.171,0.733,0.096,-0.9616,0,1,1,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,2,10,10,2,1,6,0,15,2,1,4,0,34,39,16,3,5,8,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,7,9,0,0,9,2,0,4,8,7,0,1,4,3,19,3,18,30,1,13,0,4,1,0,6,6,0,1,2,89,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107102131764914,0.0,0.0,0.12977316512399933,0.1382718294695171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761277708703348,0.0,0.10311134581238064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12775185204122216,0.0,0.3976528281842907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792083415392327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129468548067501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099750238790185,0.06335551984467874,0.0,0.1203077920855685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680658378055716,0.0,0.1963924677911057,0.0,0.07121096183991431,0.0,0.1002139750071881,0.0,0.0,0.1240668465095674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797209642583685,0.0,0.12568626512624853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27725209873497225,0.0,0.27544673856436075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850320033224765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13677991342236887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404577433757661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737346921862947,0.0,0.13091198622942546,0.13754193593976916,0.0,0.14125709055066915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027048351490693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20729915503185267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646217579706813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355328640628694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434386920418704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14329163963342156,0.14548312972110636,0.0,0.08028727565266502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507057579942295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29562109560357397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068918739883375
mentalhealth,throwawayac222222,2020/01/29,"I think helping my friends with their depression is making me depressed. I have a couple of friends who are depressed. One of them tried to kill themselves today, but I stopped him. Another one texts me every night telling me he feels worthless and is a fuckup. I have been helping them for at least 3 months now. I feel obligated to help them because I don't want anything to happen to them, but it's draining me mentally. I don't usually freak out over school but today I had to go to the bathroom after a test because I was having a panic attack about a test. I don't want to stop helping them because I'm worried about their safety. Is there anything I can do to help my own mental health? because in my current position I think it's going down the shitter. any advice appreciated.",4.1019264069264105,5.7567253181818225,5.046168831168831,81.74163419913421,71.79220779220779,6.951515151515152,31.66450216450217,7.492282038375204,2.172032034632036,625,29,114,7,12,204,92,154,0.175,0.636,0.188,0.4981,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,7,0,4,10,2,1,7,0,15,1,0,1,0,15,26,4,1,2,3,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,4,0,0,2,3,8,0,2,3,2,27,2,20,23,2,17,0,4,0,0,18,5,0,0,10,82,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281986170639078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547145604003405,0.13179375683973502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20685934978305706,0.0,0.0,0.14298708392577567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3064704644389681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907025219569155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247620337787095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058967010511606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710222659768838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19421089714028966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286161379790702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114458087103787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13359938180451694,0.0,0.0,0.4212266649051621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13905402072498693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389703478168578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25332582685580113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032214790126674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794871597726192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17033750020738073,0.0,0.0,0.1474665896531889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720193334649432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101598854798523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985595994783467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16107028287249067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382731207181876,0.0,0.0,0.08533320876035905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13842645098011078,0.0,0.14826687387530854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276412286582755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plappydaddy,2020/01/29,"I wished homicidal thoughts were treated by the mental health society like suicidal thoughts are, but it gets better. During the period last year of me going in and out of hospitals and partial programs, I always felt alone in my struggle with homicidal thoughts along with suicidal thoughts. People don't know that that's common with OCD. 
In the world where people actually talk about mental health, which I am so lucky to be a part of, people think of the words ""suicidal thoughts"" as actively self-harming usually depicted as cutting. Then they think, ""Well if having suicidal ideations is actively hurting yourself, with someone with homicidal thoughts, it might be me!"" And avoid you because you're seen as dangerous and psycho.
But I continued to be open about my homicidal thoughts to anyone at school who asked in depth where I was during my absence and why. For that, I lost a lot, and I knew I would. I lost friendships, people's trust, the chance of getting parts/solos in choir and in the school musical. Because I never want anyone to feel as alone as I felt. I wanted to let someone, anyone, know that they are not a psychopath or wrong for experiencing homicidal ideations. People should get help for it like you would for suicidal thoughts. So I stripped myself socially naked, and made myself completely vulnerable, because there was a chance that me being open would help someone. Then, in a group chat with a bunch of people from the partial program I went to, multiple people told me that me being open and sharing my own coping skills saves their lives everyday. And to me, that is the ultimate gift- to be able to help people so dearly with their mental health, to be grateful, and to be kind. I couldn't ask for anything more. And I still don't. When people say I'm so kind for doing something and that good karma is coming my way, I say it already has.
I joined this subreddit to say that it gets better. If you put in the work to improving your mental health by finding coping skills that work and breaking down your barriers, it gets better, I promise.",8.550549738219896,8.155131882198955,7.767376963350784,73.39352617801049,61.32984293193717,10.886073298429322,37.16282722513089,10.241411754978122,3.8004571727748697,1657,69,284,31,20,515,182,382,0.127,0.67,0.203,0.9878,0,3,1,0,0,0,50.0,0,5,4,9,12,24,2,2,15,0,29,4,0,1,1,67,64,31,5,10,6,0,3,2,0,5,4,4,0,0,19,27,0,2,17,2,0,4,5,8,1,0,20,9,41,16,54,29,5,36,1,3,1,0,24,18,0,6,14,196,60,6,0.06340188942449786,0.0,0.061871098245807575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133047286875718,0.06996556156778819,0.0,0.05275545102064813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13299622575889428,0.0,0.05217435280527652,0.0,0.11854441597191002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594760995433626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16822145668822455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05461511375225135,0.06647567479016057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0320579003066515,0.0,0.12175151318299685,0.0,0.057948178311917835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16562435203908366,0.0,0.036032754857057286,0.0531784967669995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695729746089197,0.0,0.0,0.12749085008031086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787303393799204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204662258001332,0.06968804065010156,0.051681002018422406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483272754598131,0.0,0.06194992123934592,0.0,0.055985029938292886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13842130375369374,0.05390201911568651,0.0,0.05999240076701294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555767690254147,0.0672593853618874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04889944572667431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865806777771029,0.0,0.3955939837611901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06373641059098391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125918170759964,0.0,0.12833219392584294,0.0,0.0,0.0661419981080404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646302418800685,0.16116064548740766,0.048809872015040084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050632830793963315,0.0,0.0,0.06628142085254064,0.0,0.34675688243670244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096003709852463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812507413742565,0.0,0.4026721451462304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06058322237338841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982822384961555,0.0,0.07479215413776172,0.050325468710129995,0.0,0.0,0.05700591285344176,0.05877418669285854,0.05721034367255265,0.0,0.07290904385951741,0.0,0.0,0.09231466122778607,0.0,0.0,0.1351166494742642,0.0693200130903432,0.0,0.04082873807677854
mentalhealth,Woahmary,2020/01/29,"That moment when... I can’t tell if I’m having issues because of my ADHD, possible bipolar 2, or the meds having a weird reaction between my epilepsy meds (also a mood stabilizer), adderall to curb my ADHD symptoms, or my antidepressant (hopefully getting taken off of it). Feeling overwhelmed and depressed",9.175974842767298,9.704887603773585,9.779245283018867,56.416540880503156,59.75471698113208,10.840251572327047,45.9685534591195,10.504223727775694,5.724149685534593,245,15,30,5,3,83,43,53,0.09699999999999999,0.851,0.052000000000000005,-0.5106,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,7,8,6,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,5,1,5,7,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,4,2,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5636430692695013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875283042434056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294806219545014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20197314821535306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118569448616376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225157475122856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329098455314394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244755429129426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5209497683916505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643617380270469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437336494594348,0.0,0.0,0.2049619577392099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KikoIsBored,2020/01/29,"How does it feel to be diagnosed clinically with depression? I'm scared to seek professional help, i feel like it's gonna change my persprective on things around me. Does it really change the way you see things if a mental health professional diagnose you with an illness?",5.7323999999999975,7.938752040000002,6.041,74.01550000000002,68.6,11.4,28.5,11.20814326018867,3.7702000000000013,222,8,40,8,4,71,39,50,0.17600000000000002,0.7290000000000001,0.095,-0.6662,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,1,5,0,1,0,7,6,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,5,1,6,4,0,3,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,1,1,22,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897751937788897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4510318642050983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18361142521204954,0.4327459622768561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.373110110067164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215580196074844,0.15229567168213104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22660012885580344,0.0,0.0,0.14288990750671712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414886845246968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148350697161934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656842069633496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134301412418668,0.0,0.16987667777241114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832543358946664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921218027865073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SuperSteveZ,2020/01/29,"Gf’s parents refuse to get her help I am a 15 year old in high school and my girlfriend is 16 and goes to my school. We have been dating for 2 years and for the past year ago she has been going through some what appears to be depression. Now lately she has been thinking about killing herself. I have already involved her parents and her parents say they are working on getting her help but it’s a lie and they aren’t doing anything to help her like therapy. She doesn’t have any other family members who would do anything either. I’m at a loss for what to do. Most of the time the internet stops at telling the persons parents because they assume that they will make an attempt to help. Does anyone have any ideas what to do?

Also in Michigan",3.4918903803131967,5.177883463087252,3.903506711409397,89.19181487695751,73.42953020134227,6.040492170022372,29.19519015659955,6.42735559955562,1.3289861297539145,592,25,117,4,12,185,94,149,0.075,0.8340000000000001,0.092,0.5499,5,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,4,3,3,4,1,0,8,0,21,0,0,1,0,18,28,7,1,1,2,4,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,1,7,6,0,2,3,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,3,1,18,1,18,22,3,19,0,2,0,0,30,6,0,4,12,83,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429356415342322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422835589752002,0.10310969344982486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536115794935514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015471758397592,0.0,0.21220590353355304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859789983003418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110519794950549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283234756422232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154893881605533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472698129207486,0.0,0.07327703066852004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3456910605679431,0.13622746212625642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555251461361166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14264805598038358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14544488921010038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06299138515187461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606546471457467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529614510363472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5726705719221529,0.0,0.12308354879545133,0.0,0.11258152790883427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253470525963383,0.0,0.26097927142588845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077958729724598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269533266794338,0.0,0.14744901066727945,0.0,0.0,0.08261667878490403,0.0,0.0,0.07518334200297119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386659844324437,0.0,0.0,0.09159209823238698,0.0,0.0,0.2490907540162535
mentalhealth,milksaw,2020/01/29,"Am I crazy for suddenly developing anxiety several weeks AFTER a stressful semester? Hi all, I'm not normally a reddit poster, just a reddit lurker, but I guess I wanted some advice (also I'm posting on mobile, not sure if that makes a difference to the text formatting).

Basically, I'm a third year college student working a minimum wage food service job on campus. Right now I'm in my Spring semester. I started my job at the beginning of last year as a regular employee. During the summer break, I got offered a supervisor position and I accepted. My availability was for certain times of the day and overnights, and I expected they would schedule me for some daytime shifts and some overnights, but instead they scheduled me for all overnights. I guess it wouldn't have mattered in the end because by the time I finalized my class schedule, there would have been no time to work during the day anyway. I was taking four classes that each had a run-time of two to three hours and met twice a week each, plus online classes (which to some people, especially STEM majors, may not seem like a lot, or would at least seem pretty average, but it was definitely new to me). In addition, I piled on a bunch of work hours (a bunch for my standards at least) and decided to work five consecutive overnights a week. Here's a rundown of my schedule: my shift started at midnight and ended at 7AM, but as a supervisor, I often stayed later to finish everything up (I also often refused to take mandated breaks to catch up on paperwork, which I was still learning to do), so I really left around 7:30AM. My earliest class started at 9:30AM, so between the time I left work and got to class I had enough time to drive home, take a shower, drive to a bus stop, and take the bus to campus (campus doesnt let you park there after 7:30AM). I'd have classes consecutively until 6PM. After 6PM, I'd have to do whatever hw or projects were due soon, plus squeezing in nap time between then and midnight, which is when I'd work my next shift. Because I either would sleep for such a short period of time per day or not sleep at all, every day started to blend and blur together. I never had the satisfaction of finishing work for the day, because every single shift ending at 7:30AM, I would just think ""I have another shift tonight,"" not ""I have another shift tomorrow."" Plus, as a supervisor, I would be expected to be on call at all times and get constant texts in supervisor group chats, so even when I clocked out from work, I never truly clocked out.

It was extremely demanding for me. I'd often go 36+ hours without sleeping, or if I did sleep, it would be for 3 hours TOPS between days (usually from 8PM to 11PM, as I'd wake up an hour early to get ready for and drive to work). There were even a few times I'd go 50+ hours without sleep, and one time I recall going over 72 hours without sleep. As a college student, going three days straight without sleep isn't unheard of. But when its sandwiched between two 36+ hours of no sleep, totalling to like six or seven hours of sleep for the entire WEEK (I'd have to work on neglected hw and projects on weekends, so there was never a time to catch up on some Z's), it's unbearable. Over halfway through the semester, I switched to a schedule that had me work four overnights instead of five, but schoolwork became incredibly more demanding, especially during final projects season, with disgustingly time-consuming projects that landed me right back on that same sleep schedule, if not worse. I started missing classes because I became desensitized to my alarm and slept through it, and I was even late to work for that reason. At some point in the semester, while driving and parking at a lot near a bus stop, I hit someone's parked car without even noticing. I had to clear it up with the police, but to my sincerest knowledge, I didn't even process the hit because I was so far gone (I had to take a defensive driving course because of this and learned from there that 24 hours without sleep is equivalent to a .1 on the BAC, and I was 30 hours without sleep at that time, so that's pretty bad). I was becoming an actual hazard due to all this.

I'm not writing all of this to gain pity. I know that that schedule totally sucked and I know that I brought it upon myself for choosing to work those hours (I really needed the money). I'm writing all this so you understand just how bad it was, at least for me personally. Which is why it still boggles me that, while I gained some anxiety from it, I never really ""crashed"" during this time. I burnt myself out, yes, but I didn't crash. This time, which lasted from August to December, lead to zero mental breakdowns, even though I was close. That doesn't mean it was a walk in the mental park by any means, but it wasn't as bad as it could have been. It boggles me even more, though, that now in January when I'm only working three overnights and have less demanding classes, I'm suddenly rifed with extreme anxiety and paranoia. I'm depressed as well, but that's been with me since I was like twelve. I've never been the anxious type, and I really thought that since I never had such a big anxiety problem last semester when all that schedule stuff was going on, so I thought I was home free. Now, though, I wake up in the middle of the night thinking I'm missing something and I often have ""dreams"" while I'm half awake about imaginary events that I should be worried about. Stuff like having to go to a meeting at work, or having to cover someone's shift, or having done the paperwork wrong. I wake up talking gibberish out loud to myself and having my heart pounding out of my chest because I genuinely believe I have something at work or in class that I should be doing and having a genuine half-conscious panic attack, which leads me to losing sleep duirng this time. When I finally come to, I realize that absolutely none of what I imagined was even real or worth worrying about. I'm constantly paranoid that police will confront me for crimes I didn't commit, or that I've committed a traffic felony without even processing it. I question my memory constantly. My short term memory has completely fried to the point where I have a hard time even remembering if the light I just ran was green or red, which I only have reassurance on whenever I'm driving with other cars in adjacent lanes (since I often drive at night to work though, and there are usually little to no cars at that time, I don't have that reassurance then). I'm not at all motivated to carry out school work and my mental space is almost at a worse place than it was last semester. I get ""passive anxiety"", where I'll literally just be sitting doing nothing and all of a sudden I'm getting heart palpitations. I'm at the brink of panic attacks at all times and it's ruining my sleep schedule once again. I have so much pent up anger and anxiety that I often contemplate self harm to let it all out, which is something I used to do years ago and prefer not to resort to again. I'm not functioning anymore. I've never had it this bad.

I know the likely answer to all this is that I trained my brain to expect erratic schedules last semester and so the change of pace is suddenly making my brain upset and anxious. That, or because I didn't have time to be anxious last semester, I repressed it all and it's all coming out now. Still, I can't help but feel crazy, especially when people keep telling me that I should be functioning better since I'm not dealing with the same workload as last semester. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this? I'm already in therapy, and the sessions help in the moment, but it isn't helping long term and I can't financially afford another therapist or more sessions, so that's out of the equation unfortunately. Many thanks in advance to any advice anyone can give.

TLDR; I had an overly demanding scheduled that completely ruined my internal sleeping clock and now I'm paying for it through excessive anxiety that won't let me function.",8.03697361462067,6.971884409179058,8.027096432978787,73.29637950285009,62.69747899159664,11.21671269906564,37.41476170887936,10.349348232952556,3.7816919198448598,6379,268,1177,123,77,2069,528,1547,0.122,0.815,0.062,-0.9982,6,0,3,0,0,0,188.0,0,2,2,27,78,42,7,6,71,1,112,26,24,9,29,235,190,112,0,24,54,0,3,5,0,14,0,1,3,2,80,65,2,7,27,4,5,27,44,28,1,16,50,7,122,15,210,112,48,273,0,8,2,0,27,92,1,40,154,824,202,52,0.0,0.0,0.026810300995763127,0.0,0.0,0.08054074351313202,0.024353716452439115,0.0,0.027510873154164027,0.0,0.030317835276135626,0.043941305993470375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05604903411364225,0.08642549355442612,0.14712076903405602,0.09311214981392762,0.027246459830016875,0.038420403548577516,0.0,0.0,0.024457356573997488,0.0,0.06251044357243045,0.0,0.0211255265967958,0.09175733812799007,0.13398136494533555,0.030342467238696613,0.0,0.0309533743372926,0.0,0.024298194233000298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061339317134422824,0.028053649257769618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02906345900495132,0.04733220130660664,0.05761115934745615,0.08906770563370378,0.0,0.021935459015444237,0.0,0.0,0.12402753530419187,0.056648214942394526,0.023662998351107467,0.0,0.0,0.028704097207670483,0.0,0.0,0.0240423598616058,0.028115063425215275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300044808522105,0.028387605261390413,0.0,0.1814607434059808,0.0,0.046295438537660924,0.0,0.024691528271083774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.013891493457880114,0.0,0.0,0.09028806045122567,0.0,0.0,0.03322122397926141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574153536147641,0.02635521053387136,0.0936833866681568,0.0,0.043946345373328664,0.0,0.060530604486125114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024610977242378845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511277065899466,0.05524498775307346,0.0,0.055116584443693474,0.0,0.3246719118542684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054526679559487694,0.024419825805508676,0.0,0.0,0.04529636773727707,0.15676273436431265,0.030991452734157432,0.0,0.059700361512539976,0.08428094809203629,0.0,0.06711114244699973,0.027535796109515592,0.0,0.024313299124838816,0.0,0.03073596590291103,0.0,0.04671419767043995,0.0,0.0,0.036677724411368386,0.02785394994585336,0.0,0.05985367723732926,0.0,0.0,0.08306087534449455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020196280136362883,0.020371349465939367,0.14832550689091234,0.026534204274847092,0.029218518531964163,0.051564283654910975,0.026918325435536846,0.026361690166777342,0.03127891128929597,0.0,0.02925852065498447,0.018616843568384164,0.04178986917266556,0.0,0.06446877353005936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038093513332847086,0.02398891511330992,0.028704097207670483,0.0,0.05194292361580943,0.0,0.026312144338820696,0.05590111989063103,0.0,0.026288554725733708,0.0,0.0,0.030776754652781086,0.0,0.0,0.03127100712300073,0.07040124676378036,0.028247468667328333,0.0,0.0,0.031122268558998155,0.046924661974015486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02780478158743232,0.0,0.05002192413260255,0.02866098918581775,0.031037383271309206,0.0,0.0909058867485853,0.0,0.4124020858951691,0.0,0.04655663723119867,0.06345163076412202,0.0,0.0,0.09722988807713984,0.029283235445619157,0.06582143225228837,0.04593837185076186,0.031470951790438885,0.0,0.06290146957965118,0.0,0.0,0.02589357233026757,0.0,0.10328375787871376,0.02208226412821561,0.024013164674996174,0.025294028470115425,0.03141849170232602,0.031899003428703075,0.0,0.03520798715610851,0.10797081290678606,0.04362198878016353,0.32040190655516904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053675491342451434,0.028601019056594564,0.0,0.023728396372372264,0.060516646786193874,0.0,0.016204659537385663,0.0,0.08815075926782408,0.0,0.02470209395778064,0.0,0.024790678966752005,0.0,0.0,0.211868801125756,0.0,0.36002035386625764,0.0558016123029732,0.055995954794200366,0.1366153557560647,0.03003810290547532,0.0,0.053076353328984915
mentalhealth,toomuch_danny,2020/01/29,"I hit 30 and.... My self esteem has plummeted, I've become very insecure, I have no self-worth, confidence has dropped and I've become very self conscious. I'm ashamed of my entire body of work.... 

I've got a lot in my life to be happy about but can't seem to feel great at any time.

I'm on medication already.

Has this happened to anyone else?",2.0662441314554023,3.644785225352116,3.8165492957746494,88.77627934272303,77.02816901408453,6.986854460093897,24.509389671361504,7.793537801064563,1.1664910798122068,265,9,58,4,6,89,50,71,0.08199999999999999,0.775,0.14300000000000002,0.7447,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,2,1,0,6,3,1,0,0,7,13,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,5,2,9,10,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,1,27,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19978783591321586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311691702919746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659098530568194,0.18550216123586552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3999003102083961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011003589295762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123999988172726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154187263947083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447983531552324,0.19960292792579207,0.0,0.0,0.1600976369811126,0.192725939225428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787755057274078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15391812070345448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823839516737153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648167139844286,0.5666087587467563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556888865926443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987624349867441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13180303263836204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JosephT24,2020/01/29,"I think about suicide a lot Not sure if this belongs here. Might be all over the place sorry idk how to express this. I think about suicide a lot. I think about how easier it would be not living with all of my guilt and regret. I honestly wouldn’t self harm or ever attempt suicide but I think about it a lot when I’m by myself or deep in thought. I’m 17, still in high school. I can’t stand living with myself knowing my stupid choices I’ve made. A lot of this deals with how I’ve hurt friends and mostly ex’s in the past. I made stupid emotional decisions that fucked up everything good in my life and living with that is so fucking horrible. Again, I wouldn’t ever kill myself, but I frequently think about how things would be if I was like not here and not being able to feel how I am feeling. I have things going for me and glad for them but still these thoughts occur.",3.5219102564102585,4.569099883333337,4.101111111111114,90.32115384615385,72.3888888888889,7.094017094017095,24.401709401709404,7.321109707123232,0.8547991452991459,689,19,149,7,13,218,98,180,0.242,0.647,0.111,-0.9818,0,0,0,0,0,4,14.0,0,0,1,1,19,15,5,1,6,0,14,3,0,7,5,54,31,19,4,7,11,1,2,1,1,5,1,0,0,1,10,9,0,0,11,0,0,1,7,9,0,0,5,2,20,6,22,17,7,19,0,2,0,2,6,9,2,10,9,109,30,1,0.11364096387907373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11715884380134615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783078870838668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20558951579317547,0.0,0.0,0.10213317072286003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492057173234575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779872679437305,0.2101184798402156,0.0,0.0,0.06458477862951788,0.09531664884275473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006791766011116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165500221086804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257268892226282,0.0,0.062454101779982826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026797355036214,0.055519234724507815,0.0,0.30104115931258585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3864539346026523,0.0,0.21505965549186876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055510414308887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848315876566668,0.0,0.0,0.1187306200074226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501072244712922,0.0,0.0,0.11855230949917568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721175513987598,0.0,0.0,0.18150764109969136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729143094267173,0.0,0.10710526357046203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15099601363837625,0.36408270516352104,0.0,0.18043646300227875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145456044230955,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hades_Might,2020/01/29,"I'm not sure about what I'm looking for or if anything is wrong with me, idk. Hi I don't really know what I'm doing here, I've just been thinking a lot recently and I'm starting to think it's too much for my brain to handle and keep in. Sorry if this doesn't make complete sense but you can ask me to fill in the blanks. I'm 18, just graduated high school 7 months ago and I start college in 3 months. For the last 4 months I've been stuck home while occasionally hanging out with what little friends I have left. Staying home not doing anything but playing PlayStation and being incapable of getting a job has left me feeling empty and in a bed mood but nobody can tell cause I keep it in all the time. The only thing keeping me sane is the online friends I've been making but that's not even enough because at the end of the day I still feel like I don't matter to anybody and I have no one to really talk to. I'm always the one people want to say stuff to and vent to and just tell me all there problems then I'm just the funny guy cracking jokes and just being a positive guy that always cares about everyone and always listening. But I always end up scared of saying what's on my mind and then they not be as understanding as I am, so I just keep it all in and move on. Like yesterday I almost started crying to my friend about my personal problem but I didn't want to bum her out so I changed the topic and never told her. My biggest thing is that I just want to feel important to someone and I feel like no matter how hard I try I'll never get the validation I want from anybody. And I used to have someone in my life that was there for me but she had to leave and it's never been the same after her. I don't know",3.0559756864389023,3.8601452588555887,4.447970027247958,88.31387916579334,73.25068119891009,7.172039404736951,24.742087612659827,7.321109707123232,0.919588220498848,1358,39,301,14,26,452,178,367,0.105,0.765,0.13,0.9229,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,0,19,15,0,1,16,0,26,2,1,5,7,78,64,34,0,8,21,0,5,3,3,0,1,3,3,3,16,20,0,4,9,2,0,3,14,4,0,2,9,9,37,10,44,52,7,44,0,0,1,0,21,18,0,5,25,202,53,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531885111067715,0.0,0.08508300419239209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828001515516389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398425621900749,0.0,0.07943344752501373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051795598105275766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09485219439712024,0.0,0.0,0.08663036144673604,0.08728536279808022,0.08988469360847626,0.0,0.08908714901232166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333316711264217,0.05479721857673352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505125481520448,0.08779447762097925,0.0,0.056120447742418436,0.0,0.0,0.0811903989882257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17184914335392587,0.12140206378696652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19693779485781548,0.0,0.08878436436637141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16826301278532488,0.0,0.0,0.07611448274135363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897731732584665,0.1704593147231064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431745658452341,0.3020932312463661,0.0,0.0,0.09339219017136256,0.06926011871943831,0.0,0.08996865938061423,0.1846355831890394,0.0,0.060015288322407614,0.12453296372332777,0.08516008353126954,0.0,0.0,0.07135157417171255,0.0,0.0,0.07223660721282278,0.0,0.0,0.11343336732253152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579328268622212,0.0,0.20346152429133085,0.0903073522835778,0.062461128655700214,0.0,0.19659727660486886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515279580562407,0.06462186049298924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05890599212244561,0.07419062832790366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16260546871104914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886513016119448,0.0,0.08389547761009772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351396512363679,0.08506761661351446,0.08599197615848764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14398592652906014,0.0,0.0,0.09511452482264306,0.18042199377392648,0.09056439721940657,0.0678554156252828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972678324305209,0.0,0.0,0.0800811704807233,0.0,0.0,0.06829392003917918,0.14853125011817792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128976962194713,0.10888790413965672,0.0,0.0,0.04954542265147572,0.0,0.0,0.0811903989882257,0.0,0.05768757644005005,0.0,0.0,0.08845450344896068,0.0,0.07338492081716112,0.0,0.0,0.20046490093274055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092898979291438,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hershesheher,2020/01/29,My SO suffers with intense episodes of derealization. Is there anything I can do to help? So recently my SO's episodes of derealization have become more intense and I feel utterly helpless whenever they are working through this. I was wondering if there's anything I could do to help them through this or if it's something they have to tackle on their own each time.,6.010882352941178,7.791243029411763,6.025764705882356,76.08394117647059,67.23529411764707,8.969411764705884,40.07058823529412,9.3871,4.038920000000001,298,18,52,6,5,94,45,68,0.10300000000000001,0.7609999999999999,0.136,0.1098,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,4,1,5,2,0,0,0,0,9,0,0,0,0,9,11,7,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,10,0,9,9,3,3,0,2,0,0,6,1,0,4,2,43,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5145132063152378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34526017574274265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24959870188180944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806820964381382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4190802729934528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086709118061569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406673240779989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822890961623386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3390190748356061,0.22758841166406224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bf9921,2020/01/29,"Overthinking/Depressive Thoughts So lately I've realized I have a huge problem with overthinking. My day could be going fine and then I think of something stressful and seem to fixate on it and psych myself out. Usually these are thoughts along the lines of ""I can't do anything right"", ""I'm not good enough"", ""I'm never going to do well"", etc. And it sucks because it just comes out of nowhere. I feel like I can't have good days because these thoughts just come around again and make me depressed and anxious. Idk where to even begin on getting ahold of them.",4.845817757009346,6.440648850467291,4.293539719626172,88.10236565420561,69.8411214953271,7.219158878504674,30.197429906542048,7.645422480735847,1.8191504672897199,445,18,86,5,8,133,73,107,0.19899999999999998,0.764,0.037000000000000005,-0.9434,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,8,9,1,1,2,0,9,0,0,1,1,27,25,8,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,13,0,0,7,0,0,4,4,4,1,0,3,1,9,5,14,20,2,20,0,1,0,0,1,8,1,1,9,57,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18988560213470052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831773613567291,0.14962923385263513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20492330116140745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28957671679023433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342003546767742,0.0,0.0,0.2167988658492517,0.0,0.2895387572422072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17367435492553807,0.18745663520539693,0.11101703460068013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498766074259173,0.12007831065328947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781627060515047,0.0,0.19105053769084016,0.2819595793113773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18960460074913926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211671442853996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219650387249797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963573609520213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608324387307929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354170285579246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301617247862284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939827013071276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19253815884677672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770060385967686,0.0,0.4003166536348172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18511934162941915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112652842409768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leics666,2020/01/29,"How I see this world and human relations - Unstable  I like to think that I am a fine, emotionally stable young man living a happy life. The reality is, deep down I know that I am not. I view the world as a place in which people struggle in, just to get rewarded with absolutely nothing. It is the same in nature, every living organism lives because they have to and because they have to pass on their genes so that another organism that comes from their gametes can also suffer in this horrible world as well…

I get sad sometimes, just thinking of this world. I get sad because I think my mom gets sad, I get sad because I think I did something wrong – just a minor thing, that will result in someone being either hurt or destroyed by it. I get sad because all around the globe people get killed for nothing – suffer for nothing while I am at my house writing this shitty piece of god knows what with absolutely no chance of doing anything to change it. I am emotionally unstable – I stress things that I should not stress that much. I have a final exam tomorrow, and we just moved houses, I wanted to sign up to the gym so that I can get more healthy and actually reduce some of this stress, but now my constant requests around the time span of 2.5 weeks led to an argument between me, my mother and my brother - which destroys me inside.

I think people have flaws, then I get sad because I think people have flaws. It’s like a fucking loop going in my head which makes me sad all the time. I normally don’t care about my thoughts on strangers, for example, if I saw someone walking and spitting on the street, then I think they are just a fucking douche bag and be fine with it. If I do it for people that I hold dear though, such as anyone from my family or my friends, my emotional stability just goes nuts. I sometimes even break things, eat more and become unfocused just because of this shit.

So, knowing that I am emotionally unstable, I am thereby writing this in order to tell people what I view of this world:

I don’t fucking know what causes this, my emotional intelligence or anything, but I fucking hate this flaw of mine. Otherwise, I love my life and the world, and the people I view as “good”.

But, just because of this. Fuck me. Fuck this world and fuck human relations.",6.619157175398634,6.569424692482919,6.767739407744878,77.81752255125286,65.17312072892939,9.57525284738041,33.04974943052392,9.174902378510234,2.7865445284738044,1796,68,338,28,25,577,197,439,0.20199999999999999,0.6970000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.9939,0,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,1,0,5,1,20,38,12,4,18,0,25,14,3,5,2,65,62,32,1,5,19,3,0,2,1,2,2,0,0,3,37,18,1,1,12,1,0,6,5,27,0,0,3,5,59,11,49,55,9,45,0,10,5,8,18,26,8,6,13,239,96,1,0.0,0.0,0.06083283021157949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04985162246403488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536675805043758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04358813215301717,0.0,0.10259761457580067,0.11098795348289207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040050026489183,0.06884734930889964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06355767725561126,0.0640382289212801,0.06594526735409667,0.05369860946507335,0.0,0.06736515957064781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378726809754237,0.0,0.3506089206039664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04117361679537837,0.0,0.05252239712969284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05876665525836995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828815850084664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048162132367032914,0.4034129016339527,0.2931209736029291,0.0,0.03542808387797385,0.05228610056155119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635988880240794,0.0,0.061545802933404815,0.06397670370848478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14385920996371968,0.06673404653479574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896768668430828,0.0,0.13703719070260842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806225119915517,0.06091033046482594,0.0,0.16513661065603308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05626241832953853,0.0,0.04161105431111123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300943366107072,0.0,0.06625535729499929,0.04582555341825576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06107793870195019,0.17944478380820034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025209154447924,0.0,0.06512987198789147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04967526164773685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06398899236070227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563745660129596,0.04799078634653227,0.12330761934356425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21422367475476525,0.0651691425435149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054486101060468944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12424365810185972,0.2796054124062697,0.06124670262376679,0.04948935555357013,0.07269950003178682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036768527978481784,0.0,0.050003729652352634,0.0,0.056049288213572336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815674371636125,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheeRagdoll,2020/01/29,"Thinking about dropping our current insurance So I (27f) and my husband (26m) are currently under his insurance through his job. It’s pricey at $800 a month but at least I can see my therapist and psychiatrist and the various other doctors I need because I’m constantly falling apart. Anyway! We’re thinking about either downgrading the insurance because the cost is just so much or getting a new plan altogether, and we started looking at other plans and options I got so overwhelmed because he wants to keep at least some insurance because I have to see a doctor but I’m so broke right now that he pays the entire insurance bill and I hate having to rely so heavily on his income for everything lately. It’s just so shitty that it’s so hard to fucking survive in America with this awful healthcare system and I started to get teary eyed at how frustrating this process is. I’m just generally not doing really well lately and this extra stress is starting to take a toll. I’m new to acknowledging my depression and anxiety and having a hard time dealing with not suppressing it all. This just sucks.",6.805016722408028,7.649981512077296,7.436425120772951,70.10785953177259,64.79710144927536,10.62043849869937,37.66220735785953,10.560738912317856,4.372845707915273,891,45,145,22,13,295,122,207,0.21899999999999997,0.773,0.009000000000000001,-0.9937,4,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,2,0,0,3,17,9,4,2,9,1,9,4,1,1,1,35,31,21,0,2,10,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,12,13,0,2,3,0,3,1,2,8,1,0,1,6,15,1,21,30,8,26,0,3,4,1,9,10,2,3,13,104,27,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944900304051026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3488592685073401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546090366008657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14750002610522248,0.12322693232489182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928786749945438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12858308309507158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226693033166212,0.14949749370973395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144270317500158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25632721450569124,0.1412530952054115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14197599459460689,0.12716817105217898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3227808743470893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201436940731816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141979903218074,0.0,0.10517372349230077,0.1060854108494051,0.0,0.27635792776179685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165501283718712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218194118180728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280182929930725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037993916137285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388746636999388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757166487132946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611657907487096,0.0,0.18334837311005395,0.0,0.0,0.08342591135326749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438704404794414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12863810474280368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaughtByTheUndertow,2020/01/29,"I have started writing a note to explain I do not think I will last to the end of university. I hope to be be gone before then. I hope at least I have the courage to leave this nightmare which has lasted 6 years by then.

I am 19. My adolescence is nearly spent. The years which are supposed to have formed me have been hell. Living hell. I will never be right if I were to live on.

I was absolutely emotionally and verbally shat on in secondary school. It was physical a very few times. The social group I associated with did not relent. I had no choice.

All it would have taken would have been for a few people my age to reach out to me. Male or female. 

But that doesnt happen unless you are one of the attractive ones. It is a repulsive idea but it is fact. Attractiveness is everything. People flock to them. Be average looking and male, you are disposable. Simple as that. Biological machinary. Garbage. ""Women have it so difficult"". Bull. Shit. Women have it easy  far far easier than they could ever know.

I have not ever experienced any intimacy with someone my age. If you are not in this position, do not expect to understand. Any of the thoughts going through your head on why this is not a bad thing, they are wrong, believe me. It destroys. The image of myself I hold will never be positive.

Maybe some of the people left behind will think ""I didnt see it coming"". Bullshit. I have not been happy for 6 fucking years. I hope it destroys everyone but one who has ever come into contact with me.

My parents should not have had me. They deserve to have what happens on their minds. Shitty, horrible skin from my father that destroyed my self confidence. Depression from my mother who suffered it before having me. THEY KNEW. They fucking knew what they were doing. My life has been inbuilt physical and mental assault. To have damaged mind and body means I have nothing to hide behind.

The one person I care at all about hurting is someone I have been talking to online. They live in chicago. I wish they were here. I will never get to meet them.

That kid you excluded from the group when you all went drinking? He is me. That kid who you took to be some soulless boomworm? He is me. That kid who was awkward, who was laughed at when he talked? He is me. You could have reached out. It would have changed things. 

He is potentially dead. You might not be in contact with him, but there is a chance he is dead. If any of this sounds familiar I hope it eats at you, do not forget.",1.586624999999998,4.240684412500002,2.870000000000001,88.73500000000001,86.125,5.616666666666667,22.375,7.100725674708028,0.9346000000000004,1938,69,376,29,60,624,229,480,0.166,0.731,0.10300000000000001,-0.9932,1,0,1,0,0,0,70.0,0,10,11,0,9,27,9,1,16,0,79,9,4,0,10,72,110,19,2,15,19,3,1,0,0,10,1,1,0,9,33,13,2,1,10,1,1,6,16,17,0,4,24,5,63,10,55,67,9,46,2,4,2,2,55,20,5,11,20,295,96,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17719234942796466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251997548784422,0.0,0.0,0.1478137602012434,0.0978554083631064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647589713737452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855406840571432,0.0,0.0918806660102141,0.1496351201362389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869268508166324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480775250901676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508445666491214,0.0,0.08887395427945273,0.0,0.09769975140517337,0.07692740894986028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23569491498238804,0.0,0.08299330657082774,0.0780593274176591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16059138376164275,0.04537795147196482,0.0,0.04936147918993533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536104981566489,0.0924583525727448,0.0,0.0,0.08913789240265388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3450649204685674,0.0,0.0,0.09297966157677186,0.09804828819611418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04773302488227076,0.14159620688273414,0.0,0.09196649631965144,0.0943677931778223,0.0,0.06134798307125601,0.0,0.0,0.23008264851326224,0.0,0.0729360015881048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725713467988018,0.0946101378846426,0.0,0.0,0.08752902335476058,0.09213902084476326,0.17539680308081515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009629001900077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333934543943221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354197393750962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964417712505907,0.0,0.0,0.18064216178267095,0.075838099556488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417336652430462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790150718421337,0.06921188293798261,0.0,0.0906083055859197,0.0,0.08915501401873663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853734198951083,0.14718326663284342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06147614343567464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962089885916587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540469353822942,0.11130586033242648,0.0,0.06895286244367364,0.05064562439077893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649867290443526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041871716105926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166415341005533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051509813373853,0.07837278053938906,0.0,0.09987852068226696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18509707924625687,0.094961886682801,0.0,0.167794572986986
mentalhealth,here-to-breathe,2020/01/29,"in need of help i truly don’t know if anyone will see this. but if you do hello. i’ve been in a very severe state of depression for about 7 months now. i’ve kinda lost the concept of time truly. but i need help. my family does not have the money for therapy. it’s soemthing id love but we truly can’t get it. i’ve tried so many things, good and bad, to help me out. none have truly helped. if anyone could speak on this for me with some ideas, please do. much love to all of you <3",-0.4838993710691817,1.4846413962264189,1.5474528301886783,99.70124213836479,87.86792452830191,4.665408805031447,12.606918238993714,5.985473137389443,-1.1991044025157231,372,4,92,3,12,123,71,106,0.11800000000000001,0.5820000000000001,0.3,0.9779,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,2,0,1,3,6,0,0,3,0,9,2,0,0,1,19,17,8,0,6,7,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,2,2,8,3,15,13,4,8,0,2,1,2,11,4,0,5,3,54,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526827710510954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086709352973005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426481911602398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15562647558283424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812145504294445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17033674721321448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440212304065104,0.0,0.0,0.15155268331949467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4844459472158865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20397497608355586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099301505287706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19724250672570096,0.0,0.3261562968478719,0.0,0.0,0.18318946723549756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422359152436284,0.0,0.13282661186335487,0.2679560107480648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19834137590724035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14398509577990135,0.0,0.0,0.2041262268693606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066326954518289,0.0,0.12004120641712213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536073820262064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267542213937993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908668215222992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway3141592653_,2020/01/29,"Starting to lack remorse…hating people I hate talking to people lately. I hate seeing people, for no reason. When I do talk to them, I hate every second of it, but I can sometimes forget about my hate. A lot of times, I feel very angry when someone even talks to me. Sometimes I lack remorse for my wrongdoings…but I still feel empathy for others. I don’t know what’s happening, and I’m scared.",2.800274725274725,4.837183166666667,4.337765567765569,83.8096153846154,76.30769230769229,5.995604395604397,23.96336996336997,6.868970318607317,1.0474446886446884,309,10,56,3,7,103,50,78,0.381,0.619,0.0,-0.9835,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,5,5,4,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,10,14,4,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,0,3,13,0,10,14,3,6,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,6,41,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382632272680394,0.0,0.13244421499024006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589658077932915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900769918009195,0.0,0.0,0.6207931092962652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639068349383301,0.0,0.17732367414312414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364222123800015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32693925982480304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162343121827255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15738038756663286,0.0,0.12526467550830464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319146476289184,0.0,0.3109412696063138,0.0,0.1112639742206129,0.0,0.1255367440011879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3790440134126125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166211690716528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297029721114766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,barry099,2020/01/29,"Want it to stop .. I have ADHD and PTSD, i have a very dark humor, I laugh when I want to cry and cant help myself...I don’t trust anyone because everyone seem to not like me. I want to travel the world . But I can’t afford this lifestyle, I want to finish college , it’s getting heavier by the second ...a girl told me I was an animal and I believe her , I love sex and feel more attracted to feel physical attachment than anything, I’m afraid to love or care for anything. I purposely piss people off in the internet, i work but it sucks...Im feeling pressured and oppressed but I don’t want to be the victim ,I’m black but I love white girl , very uncommon, cause I feel it’s totally my opposite, I’m very toxic , and I can tell I’m a little narcissistic, I love working, earning smoking cigarettes, I want to settle down but I’m afraid and feel like I’m not ready. I don’t want kids and people are judging me for it. I simply just don’t know what to do or can’t find anyone to turn to...if you have at least half of these characteristics please help me help you ...maybe friendship...I want to start a group of people like me who’s looking for a change or support ...",1.1995885200553251,3.2350923941908722,3.259859958506226,89.57631829183956,81.4896265560166,6.174343015214385,22.489799446749654,7.333567415737692,0.8435517289073302,901,30,193,13,24,305,124,241,0.129,0.6759999999999999,0.19399999999999998,0.8971,1,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,0,2,0,3,2,18,2,3,10,0,15,6,1,1,1,38,47,17,0,8,11,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,9,8,0,1,8,1,0,1,9,5,0,2,2,8,29,13,23,44,3,11,0,0,3,5,17,6,1,4,7,111,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804585993650208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489968714180978,0.0,0.17535419426886345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494857667209647,0.0,0.0,0.12003923723129628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086292827648932,0.10945061521483687,0.11271002031123165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703419946892338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180789577923163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693606617031151,0.07611545707023518,0.0,0.0,0.09737980033177457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055665136684127536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21424372407571526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508641114013525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05855410542408548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15615687507166984,0.10678564235112918,0.0,0.0,0.08947059895605736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3846425114106302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703833406013698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215937542434255,0.0,0.0,0.11695393540291628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12454489252601147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699416858867392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754127900479172,0.0,0.0,0.08907602538779356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090550744158067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312464417241872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180789577923163,0.0,0.0,0.11588988946361313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637312680842985,0.5027419496858038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551314215551171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Milkshxke,2020/01/29,"Could this be from anxiety? Yes I have been diagnosed with it along with depression however, everytime I'm in class, at the cashier to buy something, my hands shake. Say for example, I have to pull out money to hand to them to buy something and my hand just trembles, or when I'm in class and take a paper from someone. I feel afraid to even stand up in class and walk to grab something, or even read aloud. I have this mindset of people staring at me and possibly making fun of me for no possible reason, I just think it.",5.759647435897435,5.6158823365384665,6.1469230769230805,81.86474358974361,66.98076923076923,10.01025641025641,32.717948717948715,9.725611199111238,2.865825641025641,409,16,84,8,6,132,66,104,0.095,0.792,0.113,0.6124,1,0,3,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,3,2,1,6,4,3,2,0,17,12,7,0,1,4,0,5,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,8,0,0,3,1,3,3,1,4,0,0,1,7,10,1,23,9,0,12,0,1,1,0,2,7,0,2,1,57,14,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804763755038946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17538933919607574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892022246389504,0.22296133988325284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901811159146065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107220762094733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466320317982961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229214320067067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4952918681131354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197303464785834,0.0,0.0,0.22585827176155115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469111695290107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861264410610736,0.5073401738617492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516517872984415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075624306256934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suicideshop,2020/01/29,"I think something is seriously wrong. I don't know how to exactly narrate my story but here we go.

Since I was a child I had some troubles with mental issues. I have OCD and very mentally challanging anxiety. I always overthink things and because of that I let many nice things pass by. My overthinking led me to a crippling depression. I isolate myself because I have no close relatives or friends, well anyone at all in my life. Two months ago, I decided to be more outgoing, even though I am still depressed as hell. I thought maybe distracting myself from my existential pain would help. And it actually did for a time 

But now I think depression is one of my least problems. Because I see things, feel things, that my logical mind can't comprehand these. I am pretty sure I am getting insane. Every waking moment feels like a torture. I tried to get away but I couldn't. It's just too painful. I don't know how to Express this. I know for a fact that the things that I am seeing far from reality. But it feels real, everything is real. I don't know what to do.",2.3648353096179164,4.886514014492756,3.812878787878791,84.48477272727273,80.35265700483092,7.241897233201581,26.317303469477377,8.296473431620573,2.046267632850242,839,35,160,18,22,276,131,207,0.23600000000000002,0.634,0.13,-0.9801,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,0,0,10,17,2,1,6,0,21,4,1,3,4,38,36,12,0,3,6,0,3,1,1,1,3,0,0,1,15,6,0,0,12,0,0,3,6,12,1,2,4,5,32,5,18,28,4,14,1,3,2,0,5,5,1,2,7,117,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.1136129027723664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320273613839702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687398635965493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906394188190919,0.0,0.0,0.0814062768920318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938405830205483,0.0,0.0,0.21291273162947105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008271258937259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689686811365169,0.0,0.09809213179319662,0.0,0.10463426729924066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17660222044980145,0.08317323598877255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994879315813897,0.0,0.12165333371128673,0.0,0.06616636830869184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803646594944233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151627240631024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559340568134556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905129503092356,0.08223362244208783,0.05687882208393225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803553072845765,0.1169634258441606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346557555419467,0.0,0.11755491998281335,0.0,0.09292842228346043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788918273837149,0.0,0.24776641234091745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844493092420585,0.0,0.11140192020047864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650317049719741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18554950187742225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630702835297276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962878307970165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297625297081306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972811965269727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3867342299356751,0.1491994298090805,0.11438586115622687,0.09242754810550588,0.06788769485147869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904416546473486,0.0,0.1137292039375582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606188564193484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467904107241104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270417688217714,0.12729122531691905,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nataliecherry,2020/01/29,"Is this dissociation? I started experiencing what I can only describe as “dissociative” symptoms around early to mid December. I’m aware of what is real/not, but I just feel like I am separated from the fact that I’m a living person in the world. It’s like I almost feel detached from the fact that I am a person and keep questioning why things in the world are the way they are and that they almost seem like they could be fake, even though I know they are not. I started taking Zoloft in September and think that maybe this could be a possible side effect, but I don’t really know.  Is this even dissociation? It’s just really weird and I don’t really have the words to describe it.",5.014666666666667,5.876778022222222,6.255555555555558,76.93000000000002,68.77777777777777,9.555555555555557,26.11111111111111,9.725611199111238,2.2023333333333333,543,15,107,12,9,183,71,135,0.075,0.846,0.079,0.3691,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,4,1,6,5,0,0,9,0,16,2,0,1,2,26,28,8,0,2,5,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,13,5,0,1,8,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,3,14,3,10,24,0,12,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,4,6,74,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363671676569358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14951636963812787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26819825670138675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218665905598607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698471103686049,0.11998773647963172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14928693093173295,0.0,0.0,0.1846083526751404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461643232108939,0.0,0.14830814663407538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687342875518099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773803880735596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29330524649688866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893450539741931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188149058995997,0.0,0.0,0.19117059710901144,0.3227905723050296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290075352158455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23776011674248296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17457050084722225,0.12628194280838104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158244432244772,0.1076193660978866,0.16501582993911407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13331558456103446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15155408593559294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway3214524,2020/01/29,"I don’t want to die but I just want to stop feeling I feel so unmotivated, I do well in school without trying too hard and I just am completely burnt out. I cry thinking about having to go and I just feel so sad all the time i feel like I can’t be happy anymore. I feel like a burden and I feel like this isn’t real that my brain is making it up for attention. How do I know if what I am feeling is real",-0.2258730158730131,1.4324706373626377,2.746739926739932,93.37881562881563,84.38461538461539,5.363125763125763,18.902319902319906,6.42735559955562,-0.13727936507936533,312,8,76,3,9,111,56,91,0.214,0.547,0.239,-0.3143,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,0,2,0,11,1,1,2,1,28,24,8,1,3,6,0,8,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,10,0,0,1,4,2,1,0,0,8,14,5,9,23,1,6,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,5,54,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585319437061149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844962669632494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676035919435864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17559181351045647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16590293150044647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5657879338521039,0.3425986046075915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084855717116253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17016726539607396,0.14319754137170276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785142810010632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342893702044864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067036043935079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36389707666869386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617805064173326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364487396950464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242781397399536,0.0,0.0,0.0932119940172508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853018790101056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18857174029834253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437276986870707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15409328892036098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway829273747,2020/01/29,"I keep on having déjà vu to the point where nothing feels in my control Hi!

For the past two weeks I keep experiencing déjà vu to the point where nothing feels real or in my control.

Whenever these “episodes” happen it’s as if I am out of my body and everything is a blur. It feels like my body does the actions itself and I am watching the actions happen, but I can stop them. I also feel a sense of hearing loss whenever the “episode” happens.

To note I do have ADHD and am unmedicated because of my parents, which causes me a lot of stress.

Is this a sign of something bad?

Thanks:)",3.3866666666666703,4.789338606837607,4.709059829059829,84.45538461538466,73.1880341880342,6.90940170940171,29.23931623931624,7.3871296695380915,1.6604803418803415,455,19,92,5,9,151,73,117,0.125,0.86,0.015,-0.9293,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,3,3,5,0,1,10,0,9,2,2,3,0,21,20,8,0,1,3,1,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,3,0,1,0,7,14,2,14,20,1,13,0,1,1,0,4,8,0,4,4,64,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17252398356668625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480006352782265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198615745262836,0.08750917194834011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189122129987426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474694781233241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220159836553096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256250526500628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901705809748407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903408163058142,0.1025549898393286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3808329232524823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617957652438854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551947412967052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07013322196190692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204445769123648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754878251726541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593997029706263,0.0,0.13703851450032284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714098179877431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339585377061547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11051486489344953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001755267847228,0.16444059561453614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216521491988878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023137630265645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515034129249345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Junk-Food,2020/01/29,I know it’s a cliche question but how did you come to love yourself? There’s a bunch of stuff on the internet sure but getting some actual stories from real people might help some more. Sorry if I’m being insensitive.,4.90527131782946,6.064593325581392,5.9162790697674446,78.17503875968997,69.23255813953489,8.524031007751939,28.286821705426355,8.841846274778883,2.2478124031007747,175,6,32,3,3,58,38,43,0.087,0.659,0.253,0.8768,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,1,1,12,8,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,4,5,4,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,5,0,23,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.2923572387384167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580708004657841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15652373920247006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20080928441371115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16464717545994725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27039224067596584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31781831487009216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076984210956121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3356100705112835,0.0,0.0,0.3409997260565865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353671828132209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3429595953025945,0.0,0.0,0.2823606235807208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Over_Lack,2020/01/29,"I can’t deal with this anymore My girlfriend wants to commit suicide and I do also and I can’t put up with this anymore. I don’t know if I should, it feels selfish to leave everyone behind but I don’t know. I’ve already tried twice but I don’t even have the balls to do it properly",-0.0606221198156689,2.0071929838709717,2.13847926267281,95.50629032258064,86.90322580645163,4.833179723502305,21.76036866359447,6.1826913282559595,0.21381751152073705,223,8,51,2,7,75,37,62,0.11199999999999999,0.857,0.03,-0.5106,0,0,0,0,0,2,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,9,0,0,0,1,13,13,6,1,3,3,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,1,0,1,5,1,0,1,0,1,8,0,7,12,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,37,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2970109053736463,0.2152371196286244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5338438993835369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774792041482799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17776935324669701,0.0,0.0,0.2571819238546258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608903839400224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958328009294709,0.0,0.0,0.2849882891877823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27056752766221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944036274111302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827334521845916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587501401941807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dori_the_pupper,2020/01/29,"Need help to help a friend I have a long-distance friend who I met gaming nearly 14 years ago. We've stayed close over the years and through those years she has been struggling with severe physical medical ailments. For the past couple years she has been completely bed ridden.

With all of the treatment, pain and terribleness of her continuing situation, and knowing how much therapy and mental health treatment helped me, I suggested she should speak with a professional to help her process everything. I'm looking for in home options for her; either tele, online or in home mental health treatment that would be covered by Medi-CAL (California's medicaid). For obvious reasons, she has been out of work for a while and can't afford much. It's been nearly 10 years since I've lived in CA and I'm just at a loss on how to help. 

Do any of your sweet strangers have any experience with online therapy, suggestions, places for me to look that would be covered? I've found online therapy websites but a lot of them just look less than professional and I don't want to recommend something shady and I just want to help in any little way I can.",7.647227414330218,7.708056542056077,7.245373831775701,74.87996105919004,63.018691588785046,10.684735202492213,34.65576323987539,10.317481424215053,3.4700510903426784,916,36,166,19,12,288,120,214,0.071,0.846,0.083,0.5218,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,1,2,5,7,0,1,9,0,18,4,0,3,2,35,29,13,0,6,6,0,0,0,2,3,4,1,3,0,5,14,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,6,5,17,3,34,18,6,25,0,1,3,0,23,13,0,3,9,105,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924093187687585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21267608458050533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930175686273168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534812551826094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936911338089374,0.10197427917632054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430225030907948,0.16108306835332115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216209148720723,0.0,0.0,0.41925031800545787,0.0,0.20913793717066764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05729182365896796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448360787993488,0.09205265158397144,0.09225595664362696,0.26262550205117785,0.0,0.0,0.08862768834450595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501861609342457,0.21011437609290146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326814637996525,0.07729836759100601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092693001617507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09951624993128047,0.0,0.0,0.10891668522187267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071840243187289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777025695720005,0.0,0.08623479585664359,0.11717881134762255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025499222579725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111142048549148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898235737222052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3576490784013037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12297601901162795,0.08274699222416654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589358579838301,0.0,0.0,0.14810918646117988,0.0,0.0,0.3356605868512932
mentalhealth,NorthernNick,2020/01/29,"Losing my emotions I used to have pretty typical control of my emotions and used to have normal reactions to things. I've been through a lot of emotionally straining events in the last few years and I've not been coping very well. I'm starting to realise that my emotions are very dulled compared to how they used to be. My happy moments are less happy but also my sad moments aren't as sad.

For example a few days before Christmas my dad crashed and flew off his quad bike. He had 5 broken ribs, 2 perferated lungs, a lot of internal bleeding and his legs and arms were horribly scarred. My mum phoned me as soon as it happened and she was so panicked and flustered she hadn't even called for an ambulance yet.I was concerned and tried to talk her through it and try to understand what's going for myself and met dad  a couple of hours later at the hospital. I knew how I should have felt, namely relief that he wasn't dead but also fear, pity and love. I didn't feel any of this though, I didn't really feel anything. In fact all I did was make a joke about not wearing his helmet and then started scrolling through Reddit as if it was just any normal day.

Another example is my workfriends chipped in together to get me a set of high-end ear pods for my birthday. I knew that I should have felt grateful and I let everybody know that I was and thanked them all but that grateful ""feeling"" wasn't really there...It was more like a very short lived burst of happiness.

Is this relatable to anybody?
I feel like an asshole and I don't want to be this person.",5.099225806451614,5.733874180645162,5.452419354838713,83.57862903225809,68.48387096774194,8.52258064516129,31.62903225806452,8.548686976883017,2.33718064516129,1236,50,246,18,20,394,171,310,0.115,0.737,0.14800000000000002,0.9188,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,2,2,11,17,0,2,11,0,31,8,6,7,3,50,56,30,1,6,7,3,6,2,0,2,1,1,0,1,13,15,0,1,10,2,0,2,9,7,1,0,22,7,32,10,35,29,8,22,0,5,0,1,20,6,0,3,15,162,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16370532538281085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392088098660448,0.10732736335298253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842288327212864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870959343301332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045151407334336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479900307281254,0.0,0.11325303904302846,0.0,0.13202005697859084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4605390524330218,0.09065549173449647,0.0,0.0,0.06760402170999905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517699579209448,0.2070135518423947,0.0731219019630998,0.19655227685770213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053475874993740576,0.0,0.058170283255248374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905115318198772,0.3268740309285635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814289261904128,0.0,0.0,0.10079832587865503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05625122309133837,0.08343238085049966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466416294066487,0.0,0.10001024013925153,0.0,0.0903806845322629,0.0,0.0,0.11450823286496595,0.0,0.1740358588971549,0.09237871351234103,0.0,0.06832226163187281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20057088083999047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937178960471936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041310768314345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114151648716169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448937404543025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226847501610196,0.0,0.09423404851821288,0.0,0.0,0.06799962057734207,0.0,0.10056253824919624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898364417725906,0.0,0.0,0.10655439170687248,0.0,0.2652036457129019,0.0,0.2533589453672906,0.060371192942685635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202876968645762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591278597216076
mentalhealth,euphoricsol,2020/01/29,"I need to read some experiences about taking antidepressants and anxiolytics I got my first teraphy session one week ago. My psychologist told me to go to a psyquiatric bc I need to take anti-depressants and anxiolytics, she said I have two options: antidepressants and anxiolytics or some natural alternative. 

​

What do you recommend me? I'm scared of taking anti-depressants but I don't trust in natural alternatives. Tell me your experiences when if you have  one. 

​

I'm sorry for my bad english.",5.405730337078651,8.820591202247194,6.5753820224719135,63.772286516853974,75.17977528089888,10.751011235955056,33.619101123595506,10.355215969177356,4.983080000000001,423,22,63,16,10,141,58,89,0.131,0.794,0.075,-0.7143,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,3,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,11,15,7,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,4,3,1,15,1,8,12,2,6,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,5,4,42,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513210338919873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303452758292034,0.3704714563969603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272840854376805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625989955927273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29823829501819177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12966849617591555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663724294274147,0.0,0.121923117938973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22607007908504345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20659953356823024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524849097219316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500882639070253,0.0,0.1526226939707074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064819248584995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3438559730794635,0.0,0.133242474835435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14566644642740584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891530127895009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228110582710408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3704714563969603,0.0
mentalhealth,iwanttogotospace3500,2020/01/29,"I survived my suicide attempt This weekend, I purposely lost control of my car and steered into the concrete barrier of the freeway. As I was steering towards it I yelled out “No no no please God no” and I survived without any injuries.

At first I was happy I survived, but now I find myself without a car (it got totaled) and I am on the verge of being homeless.

I currently have $4k in the bank and this week I have to pay my last rent of my lease ($800) and I have to buy a new car. I’ve literally been living so frugal trying to save money for situations like this, at times not even eating at night, and now I will no longer have anything to fall back on.

I am only a junior trying to make it trough college, why is my life filled with so many challenges?

And more importantly, why did God let me survive? Just why",2.958765545831416,4.323929215568859,4.5409580838323365,85.38657300783052,74.20958083832335,6.5755872869645335,29.01381851681253,7.010146845296331,1.539104467987103,637,27,129,6,13,214,103,167,0.096,0.735,0.16899999999999998,0.9255,2,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,0,9,7,5,0,0,7,0,14,2,0,2,1,21,17,11,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,6,10,1,2,1,1,5,5,8,1,0,1,6,1,21,4,23,8,2,26,0,1,0,0,0,10,0,0,12,95,27,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172729067179537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14191285813290885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326045282919876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934189767389976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17646089659373948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390256319817915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15761751062886262,0.1466871241611449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792518666187706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18357778636995625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405709570558435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763433022531311,0.12180756651079044,0.08425107271570284,0.0,0.15227779903378344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882511405123132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151126889573184,0.1748387135683868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16655469511481974,0.0,0.16183401344917986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115710663197616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18929991737148327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19384266697775288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18863390772668231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055783340578556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341664432675616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13833015946053762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4668318598395823,0.0,0.0,0.3324741078564529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Buffer_Brain,2020/01/29,"HELP ME WITH MY RESEARCH!! Hi, I am a highschool student conducting research on the link between Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder and Rejection Sensitivity. If any of you would be interested in helping me, I have created a survey that shouldn’t take longer than 5 minutes to complete. You do NOT need to have ADHD/ADD to take this survey, I encourage as many different people as possible to take it.

[Disclaimer:] The survey is completely anonymous, and I will have no way of tracing the answers to any individual person. Participants will also be asked to provide their age, biological sex, prefered gender, mental health/treatment history, take an 18 question ADHD assessment test, and a rejection sensitivity assessment test. As some of the questions can be emotionally triggering for some, any questions that cause emotional discomfort can be skipped, with the exception of your biological sex and if you have ADHD.

Here’s my survey!!
[ADHD-Rejection Sensative survey](https://forms.gle/GMPMEmnkzaTsKbem6)",10.73233128834356,12.36044373619632,10.457797546012275,49.117493865030696,56.42331288343559,13.636564417177913,46.974846625766865,12.857556352371635,7.225267975460124,831,50,102,29,10,272,105,163,0.109,0.802,0.08900000000000001,-0.6525,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,4,1,0,2,5,0,1,9,0,17,2,0,2,0,24,23,10,0,6,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,13,2,21,15,2,4,0,2,0,2,14,2,0,7,1,76,17,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5696626084524261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476552518636552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24175504272709186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107828106395078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12173357848298665,0.0,0.0,0.24849292248930224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380873919812915,0.13581286861508768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665962458496112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12596144472425128,0.0,0.0,0.1588579783863593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12014181806638935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942153738185708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786728510898613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215394867229267,0.1034708499425014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13359252110975373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3982460583173543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3563932145322098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406089396534527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417999318499647,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MishTFS,2020/01/29,Feel so lost Have you ever just wanted to give it up and throw it all away because no matter what you do or have done nothing helps and your to the point you would rather serve out a jail sentence or get sent to hospital having the chance to possibly rather than having to deal with life,11.747586206896553,6.4955954827586195,9.961379310344828,75.29655172413794,59.68965517241379,12.979310344827587,37.620689655172406,8.841846274778883,3.0529379310344824,230,5,48,2,2,70,45,58,0.11199999999999999,0.818,0.071,-0.5539999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,4,0,1,5,1,0,0,3,0,7,1,0,0,2,15,13,5,0,4,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,3,1,4,0,10,9,1,7,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,2,1,38,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745682754880948,0.0,0.0,0.17814625659476388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012857030940253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990620855471935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643470172833653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14776488112606884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526828797677652,0.28034239539456346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958817236580928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206417134741096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190135239492929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804113197466497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762604307701929,0.32945570085456555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723702060898221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207598287855582,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whisperingtracetatum,2020/01/29,"what kind of medication should I go on? hi I'm new and I'm not sure if this is the right sub reddit to post to. I'd appreciate any personal experiences or knowledge that helped. 

anyway, I'm here to ask what type of medication I should look into to help my problems.

I think I may have depression, but I don't experience much anxiety because I am very apathetic and aloof. I don't have much emotion, sad or happy, and I feel I am lacking motivation and incentive. I don't sleep very well nor do I wake up very well. everything in my life is fine, I just don't feel joy or sadness. 

obviously I'll be talking to and asking my doctor, but I'd like to hear what anybody else has to say. I'm leaning away from anti depressants as what I've heard about weight gain, and I'm leaning away from stimulants as they give me energy but they don't make me feel emotional or enjoy much. however, I will still take any advice or entry about any type of medication. 

thank you so much for reading!!",3.464366666666667,4.7351733700000045,5.4220000000000015,79.93766666666669,72.8,9.133333333333336,27.833333333333336,9.558583805096642,2.4572333333333334,774,29,160,19,15,268,117,200,0.147,0.674,0.179,0.7987,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,2,2,9,15,0,0,1,0,18,8,2,3,2,33,37,19,0,5,11,0,4,1,0,4,5,3,0,1,6,7,1,0,6,1,0,1,7,5,2,0,1,8,21,10,23,31,5,11,0,4,1,0,14,7,0,7,3,98,27,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083093283576476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231384755009583,0.0,0.08676459725488024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120613759277996,0.0,0.2131202272018433,0.0,0.0,0.06913866981380404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953738244681187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608831316187967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474633588056186,0.2551603736432592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193294693059336,0.22188948654976864,0.0,0.0,0.17204291891730195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088010530251317,0.06445816541259353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073576160426412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783053183353688,0.0,0.15204363059238982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810758120218733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011061470261398,0.055410393770666776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952427060949549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570751585144476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3427706524335256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335016494294809,0.0,0.0,0.10953998498995282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903238002611492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862326475190673,0.0,0.0,0.10852588079282126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344887256253725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685850600699587,0.0,0.09019468900227047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350008924544967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905759050500666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689529239369328,0.0,0.08527635628753312,0.0911612368734902,0.0,0.10442022192383416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267379011366269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807456298190125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13811278819500292,0.2039531295777882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CrisprMyJeans,2020/01/29,"No close friends to talk to or eat lunch with for over a year really breaks me, also the way I’m treated and seen :( How do I stop my body from shutting down getting sick from stress?

Last year I was really stressed after migrating and I’m 15 btw. So to keep it short I was stressed out and sick and I started balding, my temple hairs were just completely gone, but now after a while it’s coming back but with how my family is and I have no friends at school I can just feel the stress building up back after my long summer rest and taking time for my self in winter . 

My grades are good ,I’m trying very hard. My social life is very bad because I don’t like talking, since I’ve come to this new school I’ve just been quiet and kinda seen and known as that weird quiet kid. My hairline sucks and it really breaks my confidence. I just don’t want my body to shut down again and I put on weight. When i was at my old school I was kinda breaking out my shell because of the friends I made, I started going to volleyball practice, going outside more,etc. now I feel like a sad sack of garbage daily. 

People used to ask me “if I liked/wanted to play volleyball” when I was on the court and basically telling me I’m bad and I should quit.  So after that term I was gonna quit trying to make the team but just play to lose more weight and for fun. But... then I found out I was gonna move.

A few minutes after typed all this I forgot to send it and my dad came in my room being aggressive asking me where my books are and why am I not studying. Then my mom sends me to get something and I ask her which one she said don’t worry about it and said go to bed.

I’m not enjoying my life :(",2.462080979284373,3.5850414604519782,3.623333333333335,92.43739171374769,75.07344632768363,6.600376647834276,22.15065913370998,6.937597516519254,0.3928274952919013,1303,32,298,12,27,423,183,354,0.159,0.742,0.099,-0.9557,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,4,19,22,2,4,9,0,22,12,4,5,1,56,58,34,0,3,13,2,6,2,3,3,4,4,2,2,10,26,4,3,4,4,0,11,7,11,0,1,18,12,47,11,42,36,5,62,0,2,2,0,21,19,1,4,30,183,57,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162698587872114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512001742514288,0.0,0.0,0.1377435432123109,0.1495700096701546,0.10919886332437853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19897829212852786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244119946164894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15430870056984147,0.09390967345509008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09164977036727466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099891283085074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443613624346316,0.0,0.0905758973927432,0.06398694027929433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820598780665707,0.20759856175782448,0.0,0.09359049827052476,0.0,0.15270958525784314,0.07512485254171006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08023476223776094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961158543589564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300935325142828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652815116781568,0.08751617629335648,0.0,0.0,0.07926429557367894,0.0,0.10020296602125604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475080220849418,0.05978690867465559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490021017124747,0.0,0.09519592957646003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650471495681064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398587805422197,0.0,0.060693161535852615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06209473022873215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003993603213163,0.0,0.1905318260362905,0.0,0.0,0.17213743403107956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17039814122036706,0.0,0.0,0.2719408519746617,0.0,0.0,0.0934382909778697,0.0,0.0,0.07409104621743738,0.0,0.0,0.09130264460555856,0.0,0.06895333002314429,0.0,0.0,0.12679247760775825,0.0,0.0,0.07488232398770565,0.4103964356122956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06734350834432826,0.14398170333097762,0.07828582096922404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222744822321094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162071692632935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735744186306905,0.0,0.1478049054269482,0.052829149867611315,0.07109440179375494,0.0,0.21813783114531052,0.0,0.0,0.08082061159216884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096000235015474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535688723662862
mentalhealth,eccentricvibe,2020/01/29,How do I get help? (Urgent) I've been struggling with intrusive thoughts for the past several years and have been trying to manage it on my own. For the past few weeks I've it's really gotten out of control and it's to the point I can barely focus on anything. I know I need help but I'm not sure where to go or where to start. If it helps I'm a college student and I live in the United States.,0.21614987080103631,2.160923767441865,2.406434108527133,94.82913436692509,84.5813953488372,5.217571059431528,18.857881136950905,6.42735559955562,-0.09545064599483187,308,8,71,3,9,104,58,86,0.052000000000000005,0.818,0.13,0.7548,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,5,0,5,0,0,2,1,15,14,7,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,4,0,6,1,12,10,2,14,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,2,5,44,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18847710224782116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25688333485160963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966185014504865,0.0,0.1301664296021212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4605539828338466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587218869853595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20224297273812694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16982728232601652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4372815312874069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165130387775714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467263181342803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587454729148133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16211285050714727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394381427552996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21586370730686905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18182899018490592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15550040092002818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837188536093276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474916664489656
mentalhealth,E_-_R_-_I_-_C,2020/01/29,"I have been waiting for a psychiatrist so he can give me some sort of test since yesterday morning when I arrived at the emergency department of Douglas Mental Institute. They just told me that I'll have to at least wait another day. I have been depressed and suicidal for I don't even know how many years and never sought help since I thought it was normal for a teen. It really started to hit hard this year and and started to have outburst in school and started to take drugs and alcohol. Yesterday morning I learned something bad about a project submission that made me have an outburst and I took some cannabis for relaxation and went to class. In class my friend after learning that I had consummed Cannabis got mad at me and I just yelled what do you want from me and ran out of the class and sat on a bench. The the psychoeducator talked with me and decided to take me to the emergency in Douglas Mental Institute. It's my first time in a mental institute. The doctor decided to keep me here because she doesn't want me to kill myself. They gave me some antidepressant to see how it works with my body this morning even thought they told me they would do that yesterday. I feel lost and abandoned. Between the few friends I have left, only one texted me once and I think he just did that out of guilt. Today a college from my part-time job called me. I didn't go to work yesterday and she saw that I'm here on my Snapchat(now I turned off my location on Snapchat ) she told me that she'll visit me tomorrow. My dad called me more than 10 times now but I don't have the courage to pick up the phone. I hate him, he never helped me throughout my life. He beat me when I cried. He asked me why am I the one being bullied among everyone else when my mom( who also beat me) told him that I was bullied. But I think I'll stop writing here since I think the text is long enough. I just don't know what to make of this.",3.791021943573668,5.1692285948051975,4.176677115987463,88.76363636363638,72.14285714285714,7.803851321092701,28.081056874160325,8.326086129247049,1.7277890729959695,1519,57,323,24,29,476,186,385,0.13,0.847,0.023,-0.9906,1,0,3,0,0,1,27.0,0,1,4,6,18,12,3,1,18,0,26,5,1,5,2,58,66,24,2,4,6,2,2,0,2,2,4,1,0,0,18,19,1,5,12,1,0,6,7,8,0,3,22,5,63,4,45,40,7,46,0,3,2,0,36,16,0,4,24,215,81,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282659657806152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694461411098279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089180101420936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994980609270578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033708619354994,0.05865292457007039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687527693972357,0.0,0.0,0.19649640972115887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10568973833291792,0.06205193578995356,0.0,0.08287146845864554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984820664569828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158104837269517,0.0,0.08037686734007173,0.0,0.0,0.09941777027278936,0.0,0.12710070000868934,0.0,0.0,0.09193936399752227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04865015180480347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818420395452571,0.0,0.0,0.1486738648242375,0.0,0.0,0.09230001059339392,0.05468227728493457,0.0,0.07695343845358679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619143669013474,0.094994261426053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898430965639698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548041922289348,0.08552199488752098,0.10644973575092252,0.0,0.10575657557657686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045399351478348,0.0,0.06796083659214767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514892202810782,0.0,0.0,0.10503210404018214,0.0,0.0,0.09104275004075099,0.06422552283086631,0.09754882708168916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29089199133281496,0.0,0.0,0.11268806152829478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14841679804462155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09427212579703552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024678502541794,0.1303981128414084,0.07317728238930875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419351822979647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163900506252721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737663190998716,0.07667240602058133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387748230785177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407246452170281,0.0,0.0,0.20430843505455992,0.0,0.0,0.08044163037550497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524566368063573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14468625752890898,0.07733549350102767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18495569879651086,0.0,0.15277093011036458,0.11220968745887563,0.0,0.09120236367405156,0.36775745599008897,0.1069005077640471,0.0,0.10465634958346016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350243209332728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919402323483283,0.08682077983432918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009408724778402,0.0,0.0,0.0683497197820271,0.0,0.0,0.1239210482554096
mentalhealth,jrenner231,2020/01/29,"Is this ANXIETY? When I was i my late teens, I was very promiscuous. I had a type - white guys. I myself, am not white. I found white guys very attractive and I was insecure and they made me feel attractive (unlike men of my own race, who I felt overlooked me). I had a lot of sex. I was left feeling shameful and guilty about my actions and I hated myself for a long, long time. It's years on now and I'm in a relationship with a white guy and I love him dearly. I am attracted to him, of course, but it's his personality I love most of all and we are due to marry next year. We have had our ups and downs based on my past, but we go to Church together and have worked through it.

However, whenever I meet another white male (not even someone I find attractive) - I panic. I begin to feel sick and have a what I can only explain as an 'anxiety attack'. I avoid interaction with other white men at all costs (I am fine around my fiance and his friends and totally find around white women). If I don't avoid them, I end up feeling sick for days...My mind seems to convince me that I find them attractive (which I don't most of the time) and I am TERRIFIED that they will find me attractive. It only happens with white men.

I am wondering if anyone knows if this is anxiety? Is this a normal human response for someone who has experienced trauma? I'm a little scared...",1.6507850241545905,3.7376979673913056,3.61695652173913,87.33770531400967,80.19565217391305,7.277294685990339,22.903381642512077,8.285830014693849,1.3673801932367151,1053,35,224,22,27,356,141,276,0.161,0.7120000000000001,0.127,-0.8635,1,2,0,0,0,0,42.0,4,0,4,1,6,21,2,6,10,0,24,5,0,1,3,53,43,20,0,4,7,0,5,0,1,1,2,0,0,10,14,21,0,2,14,0,1,2,4,9,0,0,10,14,50,12,28,32,7,27,1,0,8,3,31,11,0,8,14,156,64,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936758056502088,0.2612540181868762,0.0,0.0,0.079597184128963,0.0,0.0,0.20267738334052535,0.0,0.12950554464444503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082542210311717,0.0,0.0,0.07518798800123028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23023678263975064,0.0,0.10930096952949167,0.0,0.4161782901172205,0.0,0.0,0.12481593514068146,0.08794985994362796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469595223470091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33814833706658176,0.1006653124519564,0.0,0.0,0.1123900558816672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625616077248925,0.0,0.12841262151688748,0.0,0.12368377812250332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409415990623265,0.0,0.20148358356261997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677979016304347,0.20548391730096333,0.10771492520804384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494249544844855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106649513057376,0.0,0.1115356793911189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315569874513148,0.0,0.13356270010939386,0.0,0.0,0.1086698972529317,0.0,0.09939771147452657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221788563005302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397027633469398,0.0,0.0,0.10363254775899404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19290673099940708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13275805143013295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18785420218535764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234509159361342,0.08287438661084927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661405151491105
mentalhealth,ConcernedQuest,2020/01/29,"My son spied on me having sex. What is wrong with him? We've taken him to a tharapist. He has been exhibiting odd behaviors for most of his life. Hes a rough and tumble boy who likes riding his bike, wrestling and play fighting with his best friend but some parents have told me he pushes boundaries. He likes to draw and talk about guts and fighting. 
He crys when he gets his feelings hurt and is soo sweet and sensitive some times. But he does and says weird shit out of nowhere. I chalk it up to him being a kid but have been taking him to therapy to talk about boundries and ""right and wrong""

My son ""luke"" has a best friend who's father (Joe) is close friends with my partner ""amiee"" and I. 
The boys were having a sleep over the other night and Joe, Aimee and I were having a few drinks.  Usually we put the boys to bed around 10 and Joe ""sleeps"" on the couch. Because we dont let people drive home after drinking. 

We live on a rancher and there is an unfinished room above the garage separate from the house. Luke has his Nintendo set up in there and he treats it like a club house. We set up bean bag chairs and sleeping bags so they could sleep there for the night. We tucked the boys in around 10 and went back to the main house to have a few more drinks and joke around. Luke came in around 10:30 to use the bathroom and we heard him leave through the front door again. 

Maybe around 1am Aimee, Joe and I went to the master bedroom. We made sure the bedroom door was locked.. we always did.  One thing lead to another and we had sex for a while. When we were done Joe put his clothes back on and went to go sleep out on the couch so the boys wouldn't walk in on anything. I went to get a glass of water and Aimee called me back to the room. Luke was standing in the room. She said ""he was in here.""
I asked him if he was spying on us and he nodded yes. I told him to go back to bed and we'd talk in the morning. As he walked out he said ""You're a slut!"" And slammed the front door. I didnt know what to do. I just let him go.

Sunday morning we made pancakes. Joe's son was giggly and joking with Luke.
We asked if Joe wanted any pancakes and Luke interjected ""Joe wants to starve to death""

Joe (who was filled in that he saw us) asked him ""Got anything you want to say Luke?"" And luke straight up replies ""Yea. How many times has my Mom sucked your dick?"" 
Joe's son asks ""What?"" And luke tried to tell him in as much detail as he can in front of everyone what he saw.  I had to physically cover his mouth to make him stop. Joes son was crying. We gave them the ""adults have private time together sometimes"" talk and that it was a huge violation that he spied to which he said ""I've watch Aimee suck your vagina a lot"" and ""she just sucked your vagina friday."" He also tried to get into detail about other ways he'd seen is have sex. But we had to tell at him to stop. He likes crossing boundries.

Aimee told me she couldn't be around and needed to leave and process. We haven't had a chance to talk yet and I fear my relationship may be over

Apparently sometimes he doesnt go to bed when hes told. He just hides under our bed where he can see everything from the mirrors on the closet doors. Joe asked him if he masturbates to it. He said ""Not to my mom. Shes a slut"" but he likes watching?? Hes fucking 10! Wtf

I'm beyond uncomfortable by this. When I was a child I was disgusted by anything my parents did I'm fucking disgusted by my child watching me. I feel like I've been holding it together pretty well. This week we've just run through the motions, school, work, soccer practice, dinner bed. I check hes in bed. We haven't talked about what happened since Sunday. I can barely look my kid in the eyes. How do I even begin to talk our therapist tomorrow with out going off? My partner doesnt want to talk about it with me. Joe just says hes a weird kid but hell get over it

Has anyone else, tharapist, person, anyone had this experience with their child.",1.7448465721499318,3.687102822878231,2.4574964394380783,96.49672824820354,79.19680196801968,5.5089596685440565,19.92246067197514,6.405584697611787,-0.11842952029520235,3077,75,702,25,76,956,324,813,0.11900000000000001,0.797,0.084,-0.9883,3,0,3,0,4,0,106.0,21,4,3,5,40,38,12,1,43,2,70,25,12,7,1,113,128,57,1,11,15,10,3,6,5,2,1,8,19,15,25,71,5,3,3,10,1,25,9,20,1,1,47,21,91,18,106,70,11,104,1,1,9,10,146,50,8,8,31,412,116,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04309896521536893,0.04484407633740604,0.0,0.0,0.036649728040671,0.05651249632827347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753677934081723,0.05522071153421484,0.13305036435792167,0.28786220247506394,0.2519177988420996,0.0,0.0,0.16576445608365867,0.0,0.032853246260732126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311673235627474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0550317395529592,0.06164031109299985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043029926567511055,0.0,0.05919996361878816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716295102948049,0.05515221330796614,0.06316329757201386,0.15838663388074226,0.0,0.0,0.04502147225812929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035596439801636785,0.0,0.0,0.05149797028206505,0.04843639914698366,0.052718615818896614,0.0,0.06064566712959722,0.054500791889951335,0.038501842280570825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491497558072095,0.09964816019777364,0.1126294393088152,0.0,0.153145843528518,0.0,0.04310390799192754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04765823411514074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406001715291942,0.0,0.0,0.1865591162236462,0.0576945785938856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029618700572707338,0.0,0.0,0.11413180387922504,0.0,0.1102204123739293,0.038066884422444124,0.1579791439599026,0.0,0.04758933736197494,0.0,0.04525733697658372,0.0,0.0,0.04581870144600024,0.0,0.10199150031367253,0.03597462416841582,0.054639997272969115,0.05414370765921635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623986487189615,0.0,0.0,0.039618247814768935,0.039961674427843034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115162566759693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03651992926623458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196856873168224,0.0,0.0,0.037363272869211886,0.047058110570342086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05482951330632939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108356592796284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05786192348227654,0.0,0.04602513121620841,0.2050619182455886,0.12857587528868472,0.0,0.0545435456395288,0.04294649337370588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05532135604834235,0.044581624991207,0.0,0.2696643132300573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660497159771057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011549591816316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05079440166524297,0.0,0.0405215365131728,0.3465432670317004,0.094211359962071,0.0,0.061632418535722384,0.06257501947633981,0.035804739706151036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942779713530439,0.0,0.0,0.2059918811282602,0.0,0.07318089661278497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12965555068174928,0.046547061210302935,0.05935656202791319,0.0,0.12715217118625707,0.04277850187783463,0.04323046870701645,0.0,0.04845712543870982,0.19984089330916094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03923543098456631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11784912833051715,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kurineko_Regan,2020/01/29,"Hi, i have alot in my life rn; and i can feel the chemicals in my brain sloshing around, im just venting/talking to myself here, thanks for reading Hey, just wanted to vent out a bit, maybe seek a few words of kindness along the way, especially if there is anyone out there feeling as i am 

Right now I'm in the prime of my life, and depending on my effort my life could turn out many ways, im at the age when real life responsibility is starting to weigh in, i have to work, pay bills, but i also have all these dreams i am constantly working to accomplish, in 5 months ill take an exam that will effective immediate achieve my biggest life goal right off the bat, but this requires an amount of study and effort that i dont even know if im capable of, as well as a monetary investment that (won't cripple me cause im not in usa) but still would be a big blow if i don't achieve, now as for the title of this post, At times i feel so empowered, i feel drive and resolve, but at random i can feel myself just slip away and ask myself if this is even worth it, after laying in bed a while i get the resolve back and realize its all an adventure and if things don't work out then i have nothing to worry, i can always try again next year, but then again get a tremendous hit of sadness and dare i say, depression, i have had mild chronic depression, not medically diagnosed, i dont have the magnitude of negative thoughts now that i had back then, but anyway, my life is good, im a happy guy, i just have many things bringing me down lately

 

Slightly more detail: 

Im an 18 yo Mexico/American, just finished high school on July, took a year off before university to work, i was able to go to usa to work for a few months and bought my first car back home, ive got a loving gf with an incredibly understanding and supportive relationship, now for the negatives, i haven't been able to find a job here in Mexico and im running out of the money i made back in usa, ive been able to make some money here and there and selling some stuff, but no stable job, almost had one as a math tutor but it unexpectedly shut down after my 2nd day there, tried giving personal classes on my own, havent been able to get any students yet, im trying to learn WordPress to work with my mother on some projects she and her boss could pay me very well for, but it isnt yet approved, ontop of everything ive written id have to also sacrifice and apply effort into this, not fully knowing if it will work out. 

The worse part about studying for the exam is that i have no teachers or mentors, there is no online guidance of any kind, just ask some old teachers to nudge me in the correct direction telling me what books i should study from, which ive already bought and am using, i feel so lost in them, math comes somewhat easy to me altho when i get my ""sadness"" episodes i sure as hell dont feel confident, as for physics, i dont even know if im going the right way, i cant identify if im learning, i still haven't started studying for the biology and chemistry portions, all the above at university level, as for this exam, it is an international scholarship for a full paid study college study to japan, which takes me to, some sources say you dont need to previously know Japanese to get this scholarship because they will provide you with a full year of Japanese language living in japan before starting college, and other sources say i do require some basic level, again, taking into account everything i have to study and work and do, this is something i have to think very carefully to invest in, but it also feeds into my fear and sadness of if this is even worth it, because if i dont learn Japanese and this rule is actually true, then even having the highest score on the rest of the exams it would all have been for nothing, then again that is an assumption that i could even be the best taking into account i dont know the first thing about chemistry or biology as of rn... 

As for my life goal at the moment, its to get out of Mexico, i really dont have a problem with it, i just dont want to study college here, they dont have theoretical phisics where i am, but they do have physics engineering, which would be kind of settling for me, going to usa is out of the question because of the prices, on top of the fact i dont super love it there either, but yeah, studying physics engineering in mexico is my plan B

​

Ontop of this i have various hobbies, some of which make me a atleast some money and non of which id like to give up, im a doujin scanlator, musician and producer, i take singing classes and boxing and kickboxing, i could get good some day, i play the guitar, drums and piano and i play video games with my friends... and as you're probably telling yourself if you've read this far, holly shit bro calm down, and yeah, that how it be. Lastly i am a huge procrastinator, evidenced by the fact i tt took me about 30 minutes to write all this down and im supposed to be studying, anyway, have a good day, thanks for reading",10.283290902478306,6.039881305034553,10.054555255364473,70.4569999220658,61.22112537018757,13.190304982594693,41.0705304722814,10.5429385540328,4.072229615004936,3954,146,806,64,38,1309,390,1013,0.07400000000000001,0.8009999999999999,0.125,0.9937,3,0,1,0,0,0,110.0,0,2,4,30,56,37,2,1,54,2,89,17,2,10,10,160,152,82,0,23,36,2,7,1,2,8,11,3,2,2,45,51,2,2,24,12,19,10,27,10,2,3,18,10,88,27,137,116,30,123,2,6,0,2,31,61,2,28,49,560,133,49,0.15208428141784056,0.0,0.03710308006061755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03807260982775802,0.0,0.04195719658995408,0.09121630867748222,0.03163657633935291,0.04119581384402215,0.04619976209420263,0.05171126327818037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026585216425757074,0.0,0.0,0.03384681355048959,0.07108913662839278,0.0,0.03572204717511651,0.11694342480787345,0.0,0.0695318747677879,0.0,0.0647062609749842,0.0,0.0399007676233748,0.0,0.04150916145618395,0.0,0.0,0.04244408883849832,0.0,0.0,0.038765015197878415,0.03905811263987742,0.0,0.03275178549472128,0.0,0.041087269820470285,0.0,0.12142692350153622,0.0,0.0,0.07356133492186558,0.0,0.06549498436695274,0.03859058607253353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4901645241819816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15067535030319731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834177284363951,0.0,0.0,0.04278427463553525,0.1345721690358889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034750569494209974,0.06468140604086199,0.0,0.0,0.029374984640512986,0.0,0.1390510799887829,0.07294655040293599,0.06482475143504955,0.09567080974756922,0.030408923253339087,0.0,0.0,0.03764683731508132,0.0,0.04047413639125326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04017134833110342,0.038138233614111984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4928313651749641,0.0,0.07546009115880592,0.0,0.0,0.118779281802688,0.10447692964959987,0.030992246943545992,0.04288942344108725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879878448559317,0.018575174456743646,0.0,0.03357330170128837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04150448966385019,0.0,0.06863100087319195,0.035976456080411716,0.050758719400103965,0.07709479539291643,0.03819727555025136,0.0,0.0,0.03830222836264558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060696111229520226,0.0,0.0,0.02819214190459904,0.0,0.0,0.04043583966160713,0.0,0.0,0.0729644848780851,0.0,0.0398967175045543,0.0,0.02576406126521704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041173114067622134,0.0,0.0,0.03319853209246529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03641367540498965,0.0,0.04099314451213042,0.0363810294715067,0.0,0.0,0.04259230032772025,0.0,0.11409407818821113,0.04327630193499857,0.02435727125421521,0.0,0.0,0.04082040057232507,0.0,0.09740935901732996,0.0,0.09070764359966492,0.0,0.03847935304678296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039028082341390984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029270477500296238,0.0,0.0,0.0807345278707861,0.0,0.06072735179778128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04352502909447225,0.0,0.04314586006817297,0.03583440884819364,0.0,0.14293556562982845,0.030559896138367317,0.06646418267262097,0.07000938658096696,0.0,0.0,0.07577852908608909,0.024362366659604624,0.0,0.030184482866670238,0.02217039188103409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448561628082445,0.07744143300621892,0.04135600652045628,0.0,0.03958127512405688,0.0,0.03283799724789832,0.0,0.06274272986207867,0.04485162477405124,0.09053806773665513,0.0,0.0,0.06837101679129018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22143833637447505,0.03861224253162891,0.03874671892210885,0.08102723250602267,0.0,0.04619976209420263,0.07345296821554384
mentalhealth,ihxai,2020/01/30,"Fell into one of YouTubes rabbit hole ended with watching gore , was fine while watching but days later its getting to me the other day i was watching some true crime documentaries on YouTube then ended up watching top ten serial killers videos and then top 10 disturbing things not to google, then of course i had to google and see for myself, ended up on a gore site i watched alot of things while i was there, at the time of watching I didn’t feel anything not even a flinch to look away (there were even stuff that was turning me on) I watched for hours then I was like okaii that’s enough internet, i went to sleep immediately didn’t get any bad dreams but the following day i couldn’t stop thinking about what i saw and i now feel deeply disgusted and disturbed with what i saw, i also have this feeling of puking, I also feel bad for the victims and angry at the predators, been watching comedy shows and funny videos to unsee all that shit but still cant stop thinking about it, i wouldn’t actually ever do harm to other humans or animals.
I guess what i am wondering is why didn’t i have these feelings/emotions while i was(i could have stopped earlier maybe) watching but a day later.",10.847035440613027,7.255110590517244,9.518505747126435,72.7326245210728,59.47413793103448,12.380076628352489,40.43295019157088,9.725611199111238,3.7432340996168576,955,34,184,12,9,296,131,232,0.23399999999999999,0.67,0.095,-0.9922,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,11,11,3,2,9,0,21,2,2,0,3,35,38,20,0,3,7,0,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,15,9,0,3,7,4,0,3,8,8,0,2,14,17,22,3,28,21,4,39,0,0,13,0,1,12,1,5,25,129,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.1303370931805968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21361871672582644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09082663392585187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991001737518773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548574899060125,0.0,0.22303712165486936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663826437856593,0.0,0.0,0.3445453602427314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15023909752602366,0.3548884514878215,0.1380050881455062,0.0,0.17643267657206307,0.1208143344247097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701315255689967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13956110181804804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14713342902104515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153151231921295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06525157049115729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11215831051923493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418082419314867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050496207724558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643149732854584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13709931349309154,0.0,0.0,0.13365830072972215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666266111798596,0.3349910461704923,0.0,0.0,0.1528963569468145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17746510874471713,0.17116207324163066,0.0,0.0,0.07788098529091744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14527693298313096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12381316745286595,0.1205187899610094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484212241141844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theevilsoultaker,2020/01/30,"Are these things something to worry about? Let me first get this out of the way. I've been diagnosed with bipolar (I don't remember which), generalized anxiety disorder, ADHD, and BPD. The medications I've been taking are adderall and lamotrigine but I think they are thinking of adding xanax and either adding or switching me to depakote.

I talk to myself on a daily basis, I usually do it while pacing back and forth and I do it as if someone was listening and talking to me, or sometimes when I'm working on something I talk to myself as if i'm talking to a camera and I was making some sort of tutorial or if it's a tedious task I complain about it to a fictitious person, and sometimes I'll talk to myself about stuff I know about, like something I want to argue about, or just something I have an interest in, to a fictional audience like I was giving a lecture, seminar, or speech.

I usually also have a problem where I think real cameras or microphones are listening in on me while I do this and people I don't want hearing it are listening, so I unplug any microphones I use to talk online with my friends and place objects in front of any object that I feel is a camera. When I don't I feel like the stuff I'm saying, especially if it's something embarrassing is being relayed to one of my friends and they're all secretly laughing at me.

Another minor thing is I get short term amnesia I forget things that I did that day and if I took my medication or not. Also I sometimes feel like I hear people calling my name usually it's the voice of my friends echoing my name, or sometimes it's someone else saying something to me, one time some people criticized my work (I'm an artist) and their criticisms kept echoing in my head over and over again causing me to cry and not fall asleep, it all sounded like they were all there but in the end they weren't.

I get extremely discouraged easily and can't bring myself to work on things for weeks sometimes. Usually because I feel like most of my artist friends see me as beneath them or they're secretly laughing and judging me because my skill is not yet at their level, I can never take a compliment seriously because I feel like everyone who gives me one especially the people who draw better than me are just patronizing me and my work since they're better at drawing than me, and when I'm in this state I even try to improve by practicing the things they tell me to work on but I feel unmotivated while doing it and while I'm doing it I feel like it doesn't come out good or the way I wanted it to, so I just give up halfway into my study/practice. Usually in my manic phase I can end up working on multiple different projects at once as well as do art studies, and I feel actually good about my drawings and artistic skill, though that only usually lasts a week then I go back to this discouraged state.

I have constant mood swings where I go from liking my friends and being happy and joyful one moment hating them and being furious another, getting sad and feeling that everything is my fault, then go back to being happy and liking them again in the span of like 10 minutes. I feel I can't live without them, they're the only people I ever talk to, I just sometime's fear they're all talking behind my back sometimes and have something against me when I get angry with them, I feel like they don't like talking with me sometimes.

I know these feelings are not good, but are they something to worry about as in ""do I have some other illness?"" I feel like there's something even worse than what I have now, are these all just symptoms of the things I currently have? Does anyone have any advice on what I could do? Any help would be appreciated.",6.981892167193536,6.403711182191786,7.47027397260274,74.84313136635056,64.57534246575342,10.33649455567264,35.56726378644186,9.725611199111238,3.3456958201615734,2953,123,552,52,39,975,273,730,0.10099999999999999,0.726,0.17300000000000001,0.9958,2,0,9,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,13,11,37,45,3,2,23,0,55,9,2,3,7,116,108,68,0,11,30,0,13,14,5,1,7,10,0,1,39,36,0,3,21,4,0,8,14,12,1,5,10,24,103,32,85,90,11,84,1,3,1,0,49,34,0,20,52,408,142,8,0.0,0.0,0.041958957208002086,0.0,0.05167414629928521,0.04201625849087173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876951430478595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695798189886375,0.0901723952124148,0.03289265598368248,0.0,0.0,0.030064564897344773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224843191600796,0.0,0.07863188051254237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605486355526557,0.0,0.0,0.05415332937728001,0.0,0.04390483601512249,0.0,0.0,0.044169855284371916,0.0,0.03703818561190904,0.0,0.0464645790423377,0.0,0.034329677474055915,0.0,0.04723028412145382,0.02772956583934427,0.0,0.0,0.04364114103205817,0.0,0.04492280734264454,0.04927838996634958,0.0,0.03762704300753377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035918551234425986,0.0,0.07616531864268196,0.0,0.0,0.056798344552021485,0.038893329324259485,0.0,0.041085561872342025,0.038643011814388194,0.0,0.0,0.04838367989058948,0.2826280665556528,0.2150199066462858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0365733025908896,0.0,0.0,0.16609722447615155,0.0,0.11232102381958092,0.12374017932585145,0.07330871094903232,0.10819175674081093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154240316959657,0.0,0.04245072443010065,0.04412741876182457,0.0,0.0969216902018225,0.0,0.028820042931186906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047260152130001266,0.03504836690537642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0439674374289003,0.0,0.2940868867068905,0.0,0.037967218007621546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0287008912974663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663008883433494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03316200631495299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0457904973288419,0.1165437631986818,0.06540244858202009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904384103035434,0.03754340030963591,0.04492280734264454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041142408023378665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04894010141596206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048707320924495374,0.0,0.0,0.06838602311935567,0.0,0.0,0.03426311369246385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035567636975076825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728625892578025,0.29791134315468704,0.3402017696998344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844276163964434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044690439559733015,0.06465692090214814,0.3110348884864143,0.037581351629961166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17139213531673747,0.0826523969292532,0.04224442238810535,0.0,0.025071948816679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047771348799442434,0.0291922015488168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0371356803551075,0.284131318772769,0.0,0.07608239268259523,0.06825817701479305,0.06897934373351566,0.0,0.03865954744358746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04144766018083482,0.0,0.1878143606602466,0.08733126357395192,0.04381770781690166,0.03054389892383195,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,transcendence12,2020/01/30,"Loneliness and sadness My best friend would always tell me ""you're my favourite person."" For a while I believed it. I clung to it. She got a gf recently. The gf is my other best friend. I guess I set them up accidentally. The three of us would always hang out and it was always incredible. I had these amazing friends who I loved and who loved me. We spoke about moving in together. Once they started dating, everything changed. They're a couple now and the whole dynamic has changed. I understand that and I'm really trying to be ok with it. It's so so so hard for me to see them being happy together, without me there. 
Today my friend posted a picture of her gf on ig with the caption ""my favourite person.""
I feel so Alone. Like they don't miss me when I'm not there. I feel so sad all the time. These are my closest and pretty much only friends. I don't know what to do anymore",1.1984831460674137,3.568364747191016,2.8630224719101136,90.38801685393257,84.1123595505618,5.807191011235956,22.38314606741573,7.1686216300943375,0.8219002247191014,687,24,143,10,20,226,106,178,0.085,0.662,0.254,0.9877,0,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,2,0,4,2,10,17,0,0,9,1,12,2,0,0,1,20,26,13,0,2,2,0,3,1,8,2,0,1,0,2,12,10,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,3,0,1,4,5,29,14,16,18,5,17,0,3,1,2,24,5,0,1,9,101,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293635428703728,0.0,0.0,0.3117920114355582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238718448844373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072476235370998,0.26215943768520705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26426510512755313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382046138831149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225624095890087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263110828755792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4825050941411648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989765480148076,0.0,0.13759654825699735,0.0,0.0,0.13296331711309414,0.11189002807857557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686443263110822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102210033212214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22546263729207885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13275387046966666,0.09181928573113404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330193703964988,0.0,0.09499561088289372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21812383630024196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962412300348026,0.1270729279172246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800171139039735,0.0,0.1233282682529388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953283054483192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08840815055726238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091721650578828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07283290291121702,0.0,0.11839499867032717,0.0,0.0,0.08480205494657199,0.0,0.0,0.13003014036385813,0.15024490873921426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13945157545463585,0.0,0.12040362047323765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774573521280941,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Teashade_,2020/01/30,"Surviving retail? Hello reddit world,
I have a question that I can’t find any answers to online which is super weird. 
So I work in retail... I’ve been working in retail half my life. I’m 24 and I’ve been working in retail/fast food type jobs since I turned 12. The work is fine. The current boss and coworkers are amazing. I am currently working for a small business. I’m getting to the point where I just cannot handle the retail abuse anymore. It completely ruins my entire day. You can only take being treated like sub-human garbage before it breaks you. I can barely fake nice anymore, because I know I’m just gonna get torn apart so I cannot bring myself to fake smile and be even nicer than the customers when they are nasty.

So my question to you reddit users is: 
How are you supposed to unwind after working in retail. I can have a bubble bath sure.. but I’ll just sit there hearing the abuse play over and over in my mind. Is there like a certain activity I can do to process the day?? How do I forget the daily abuse... daily?? 
A person can only go on so long being walked all over before it seriously messes up their mind.

Are there things you do? Do you know of any techniques or anything??

Ps. Because I live in Canada we are currently exercising our right to legal cannabis so it definitely helps but obviously not the best coping mechanism.

Thank you!",2.230863539445629,4.6712711268656735,3.5973347547974437,86.3192537313433,80.26865671641791,5.470362473347548,23.004264392324096,6.7097532225279775,0.8092980810234542,1074,36,201,11,28,351,151,268,0.102,0.7609999999999999,0.13699999999999998,0.8258,4,0,0,0,3,0,37.0,2,7,2,9,16,18,0,0,14,0,29,3,0,3,4,28,43,15,0,0,7,0,0,2,0,1,2,1,1,1,7,5,1,0,6,4,5,3,4,6,0,1,2,1,29,12,22,37,2,30,0,1,0,0,17,17,0,3,10,128,36,10,0.0,0.4079796512494734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15610601577210198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276579617412159,0.0,0.0,0.09445255298071498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13993526427402933,0.0,0.19533532843659568,0.0,0.12045247911322544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12034259856523664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480446899644143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580981756451875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490505560404008,0.0,0.13879007006508365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993358456598666,0.0,0.06523100918720214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12936320081503966,0.0,0.07693330550554286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389950113219628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615802588279085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107112900606463,0.11214951222966932,0.0,0.1013511183571163,0.1015749597653668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317862159103082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745877537235123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021976346928227,0.0,0.0,0.10850235398496832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25715536172308984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801982502540488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494558658525694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817695098159492,0.0,0.08629880706093428,0.0,0.0,0.1056722047865254,0.0,0.0,0.07625343433765475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484555582067135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5013587114184045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Black_crater,2020/01/30,"I need to vent My feelings have disappeared. My sister just came home to visit as she lives in another city and she was clearly joyful. My parents too. But I’m indifferent. And when I was about to travel for the first time alone in my life, my parents were anxious. I was, again, indifferent. It didn’t matter for me if they were or weren’t with me.
My grandmother has become extremely ill. Father is worried, stressed and sad. I’m indifferent. We were never that close, and since she got diagnosed with Alzheimer’s, she has gradually forgotten me and my siblings.
My father got extremely mad recently and yelled at me. I thought it would end in me crying when he left the room as usual. But I haven’t had a real, true cry for the last years. I can actually tell the date for my last cry: September 11th 2011 during my great grandmothers funeral.
No matter the situation: joyous, sad, anxious, angry... or with whoever: friends, family... I’m indifferent.

The last years I’ve thought about ending my self. I see opportunities and methods everywhere. I even learnt the hanged mans noose just in case. I’ll go to sleep hoping I will be let go painlessly. When I’m on a plane I accept the thought of crashing.
But I’d never do it. Not in my current position. I don’t want my parents, siblings, grandma and my friends to be sad. I would never imagine hurting their feelings. The thought of death does not scare me. It’s the consequence and aftermath that does.",2.709673913043474,5.376047431159421,4.030608695652177,82.55134782608698,80.1231884057971,7.448115942028986,27.31594202898551,8.447377352677275,2.3239646376811587,1145,50,212,26,30,375,149,276,0.179,0.684,0.13699999999999998,-0.8779,9,1,1,0,0,0,49.0,1,0,2,2,10,15,1,2,12,0,23,4,1,0,5,46,42,20,2,6,10,6,2,0,2,3,3,1,2,2,6,15,0,0,8,1,0,7,10,7,0,1,16,4,39,8,25,20,0,38,0,4,1,0,20,10,0,4,21,135,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.09974788898082107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058647559112884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718219261496938,0.0,0.23094954892830155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288933511071016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690765982162353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3368378137038837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10374689888222252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17889949409306455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18106574266126416,0.0,0.0,0.06751258067000983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635997181288916,0.0,0.10336677290071483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869447185832896,0.0,0.0,0.15794336760981267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618320453519462,0.0,0.16350264699021272,0.11269329502620914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253079491648392,0.10152336622261976,0.0,0.0,0.10942414222454963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499585912280375,0.0,0.0,0.11105778023918488,0.1045225944412352,0.0721980518205651,0.0,0.0,0.0902584358319708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579173039643043,0.2365054098857137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3404956927596028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116343973434557,0.0,0.0,0.1009257842346046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023358608146748,0.0,0.08145276928096161,0.0,0.10663338572137833,0.0,0.0,0.08455397703791127,0.1148948568335168,0.1022896323464905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708786879377288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934112617602542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245917525994208,0.05960286273801815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125762774180486,0.0,0.060289535009792984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380512008849528,0.0,0.14522236211889314,0.0,0.0,0.13164726498726692
mentalhealth,ilov3jeekies,2020/01/30,"My brother's acting aggressive and I don't know why I don't use reddit usually so I hope I'm posting this correctly.

 My brother (17) is a great person, but he's very obviously mentally ill in someway. He paces around, mumbles to himself sometimes or over dramatic movements, and talked to me about suicide, saying he had a plan and stuff. He has an odd sleep schedule.

Today  while eating lunch at the table he said something to my dad shaking like he was mad and then stopped mid sentence at ""Did you know that-"" and starting eating aggressively shoving food in his mouth shaking. He got up and I said ""dude calm down what are you doing"" and he just stared at me with a fake sarcastic smile. It happened out of no where like he just snapped, but there was nothing that happened that could make him snap. Then my mom said stop (in our native language? if that matters) because she assumed we were fighting, then he said it over and over again louder and yelled ""what did I do"" (he also said I ate food? is that bad? or something along those lines.) 

I don't know if I missed any parts of this but I'm worried for him and want him to attend therapy of some sort so he gets better, because something is obviously going on to make him feel this way. Any thoughts on what he might be dealing with and what type of therapy to recommend my parents to send him to?",3.5393687821612327,5.395426211320753,4.11376500857633,87.02320325900517,73.67924528301887,6.6295025728988,29.026586620926253,7.348242739294969,1.6510377358490569,1066,45,208,12,22,337,157,265,0.17300000000000001,0.727,0.1,-0.9749,1,0,3,0,2,1,33.0,2,2,0,2,10,15,4,2,5,0,19,9,2,3,3,47,44,25,1,5,9,5,1,2,0,1,1,7,0,1,16,17,6,2,6,0,0,7,4,9,0,0,14,9,27,6,32,27,2,37,0,1,1,0,41,17,0,9,13,132,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523868267613377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496749622709545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09488624923518714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899683852205813,0.1299505646553585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426875332915892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510214196412966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988793137740864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181330289928468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05389428356680095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577741653196945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055688025160587296,0.0,0.0605766282065686,0.0,0.08524845821855137,0.11751405655380916,0.0,0.0,0.18851149090682875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586630373211954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17573454537345629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414738926371783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229713212656395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741600924565682,0.11307341879998895,0.0,0.12483501319721245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227441775473843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835377335736648,0.11542482004639612,0.0,0.0,0.09306885523120254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208219674484167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.506949751895145,0.08476335165490377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666534896897124,0.0,0.0,0.2461708088871963,0.10541862548564346,0.0,0.07544379839483947,0.0,0.0,0.17822530360964686,0.0,0.0,0.12201818503435245,0.11659037910792926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567169601537307,0.0,0.0,0.24378618557903284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461926142765895,0.0,0.0,0.10103331371982543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205813086660262,0.11739203319989115,0.08794656983748918,0.06286858348667447,0.08460488850959352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961794270787894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824566581194876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chaotic_thoughtss,2020/01/30,"I want to die. I saw a psychiatrist today, for the first time. We spoke about suicide and how I view myself. He said I kept using dehumanising language to describe myself. I told him I'm not going to kill myself. Which is true, I'm not going to, but not because I don't want to... I used to say that I just want to have never existed, because that's true, I want to not exist. I want to not matter, fade into the background, not effect anything, and frankly that is impossible because I have already existed. I used to not want to kill myself, but just feel better.. yknow? Like another way of life.  But he told me that if I didn't want to get better, nobody would force me to. That's kinda when it hit me... I don't want to be better. I want to suffer alone. I don't want to be different to how I am now. I just want to die. Genuinely. I'd like to go peacefully, which I guess contradicts suffering alone. I just want to run away and have people forget who I am, then die. I actually want to die. I don't want to be fixed.  I can't express this without people thinking I'm suicidal, or without becoming of immediate concern, which is exactly what I want to avoid. Im not a safety risk. I'm not going to commit suicide. I'm not gonna do it. I'm okay. I really do feel okay... I'm okay",0.2824783147459762,2.4079505873605958,3.2162936802973974,87.97398203221809,85.87732342007435,6.11454770755886,20.86257744733581,7.42949916751922,0.8128883767038411,984,32,212,17,30,349,119,269,0.207,0.594,0.2,-0.9524,1,3,0,0,1,8,49.0,1,0,0,5,9,16,2,2,4,3,20,1,0,6,5,62,62,12,9,17,21,0,2,2,0,2,1,3,0,0,13,5,0,2,4,0,0,5,19,6,0,1,7,7,35,10,32,49,0,16,0,2,2,0,11,2,0,4,10,133,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.07589153348714091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16109090128001238,0.0858202603350137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154780059183142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399743588453033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306673556455301,0.0,0.0,0.14222217114433908,0.0858899856772188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063416469963031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3228486594323715,0.0812522751907309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864490153331079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661504527996824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04063120395607927,0.0,0.17679214362764922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567155583373727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400409524084364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17208022330470246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05493069500949802,0.07598821833714803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059980411340443525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078307603931593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0498209492048807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397633047800538,0.06184519955878685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552006895121643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983137146977378,0.0,0.0,0.04534785346967583,0.0,0.07371612055322302,0.14862363138415627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20150289116574524,0.0,0.0,0.6880544508565392,0.061729581374122273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499334921496844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05524501756596955,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway237902,2020/01/30,"I sometimes mentally ""collapse"" and I'm scared, TW: mention of self harm (Throwaway for obvious reasons)
I hope I'm allowed to post this and I'm so sorry if I can't but i dont know what's happening to me and i want to know if anyone here knows what I can do to stop these.

I think the best place to start is to describe these collapses. 

Sometimes after I had a nice/fun day or evening i start to feel really bad emotionally afterwards and sometimes this results in me starting to cry out of nowhere, curling up in a ball, hyperventilating and telling myself I'm worthless.

I also get the overwhelming urge to hurt myself in some way and often these collapses only stop once I've hurt myself (not with a blade, I stopped using those almost half a year ago) by punching myself, scratching myself or hitting myself with an elastic band.

After I've hurt myself, I feel fine within minutes as if nothing happened.

Does anyone here have any experience with this phenomena? Or does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this without needing to hurt myself?

I do go to therapy but I've only just started and we haven't gotten around to talking about this.",5.4347234678624785,6.466701470852017,6.188269058295965,77.1749297458894,67.9237668161435,8.278505231689088,32.80388639760837,8.447377352677275,2.6750115994020933,920,40,163,13,15,302,129,223,0.215,0.737,0.048,-0.991,1,0,0,0,0,8,22.0,1,0,0,1,10,12,0,2,7,0,10,0,0,5,1,46,34,19,0,6,11,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,11,14,0,3,7,2,0,1,5,9,0,1,2,3,24,3,34,31,2,25,0,6,0,0,7,9,0,10,13,113,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252040026565623,0.0929996167065405,0.0,0.10505586133418524,0.0,0.0,0.08389940449044432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426897533146592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22007418112382965,0.0,0.0,0.09339538757786403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759851183884565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010039841063486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524271333783988,0.06766062212940893,0.10816136188168472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836212765486244,0.0,0.12295801129942108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801373032114308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929447346156456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262567675728547,0.0,0.0,0.10609498304599638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05481304968043968,0.0,0.059624842536347374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855495806614232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10420292242756894,0.0,0.0,0.4492489100065928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729733876959618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572827882256801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779213886419399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006674724999244,0.0,0.0,0.11172960856417594,0.0,0.15958311015340446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961242993174773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047827168458373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721036784550406,0.10786870103057486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503686158954548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944781318764173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31128683443120864,0.11744223685425527,0.2970336734026716,0.0,0.0,0.2631375163573136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432561428343972,0.0916991505196743,0.0,0.1199778970704614,0.0,0.0,0.06722442787985561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061170487063276,0.0,0.0,0.06188078639988921,0.08327556855735882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101133010516328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06756094804416249
mentalhealth,vporeons,2020/01/30,"I feel so lonely I’d honestly rather die Why do I feel so lonely that it physically hurts? I have a few friends who are always very supportive and kind to me, but I just find myself feeling like there’s not a single soul on this earth except for me. Even if I was with the person I loved most right now, I still think I’d feel this empty pit in me. Do things get easier?",1.4431103074141056,3.0873729493670865,3.3000361663652846,91.50405063291142,79.0,6.53960216998192,17.614828209764926,7.447530270364453,0.08070560578661867,289,5,66,4,7,97,61,79,0.12300000000000001,0.617,0.259,0.9166,0,4,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,3,0,5,1,0,0,0,15,13,5,1,2,6,0,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,11,6,6,12,3,5,1,3,0,1,4,3,0,2,3,46,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19856636362421304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476691051656065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15761849025939995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4826512192514758,0.1704834046968388,0.0,0.0,0.21811128183780326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18437152677384436,0.0,0.12467877603451985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554674687917075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24850529345592934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658672563038767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21538057925579335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083699489019172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20379599018090505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19057702846332056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708041618434961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15854082734293048,0.15290992631399264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969017693149048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21533414433901885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cutiekittypie,2020/01/30,"I can’t do anything I went to the gym today. I wanted to use a piece of equipment that required me to hang upside down and I just couldn’t. I can barely run on a treadmill. I’m not fat but I’m not skinny either. I went into the dressing room frustrated by my fear until I saw two skinny girls looking in the mirror admiring themselves and how fit they were. That’s when I lost it, I ran into the bathroom and cried because I felt so ugly and afraid. I’m currently in my bed after my mom picked me up, I feel terrible.",1.4113636363636353,3.157985590909096,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727274,79.45454545454545,5.854545454545455,22.81818181818182,6.742157984588678,0.7035636363636368,405,13,84,4,10,140,76,110,0.22,0.722,0.057999999999999996,-0.9666,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,2,4,6,1,2,6,0,5,3,3,3,0,19,18,9,0,2,5,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,3,6,3,1,2,1,0,5,4,5,0,1,7,4,17,1,14,10,2,19,0,1,2,0,3,9,0,0,5,59,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21722211799576133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160911661615476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899550454732641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2970359455548389,0.13346950424277332,0.0,0.2534494453769705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22166556191733,0.0,0.28815085535733875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091546305262633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502095844260636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25785712821972995,0.0,0.0,0.2279824922999924,0.0,0.0,0.1556944097793102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4893995854457389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaytehee,2020/01/30,"Are online tests accurate? For the hell of it I took a ton of different anxiety tests, my results were either mild to severe depending on the test. I never thought about actually having anxiety but it kind of made sense when I was taking the tests. I thought maybe I had adhd because I have a hard time focusing and I'm very restless at times but now I feel like I'm getting too much into my head.

 But lately at work I've been feeling super off and wanted to cry over the dumbest things and I couldn't understand why. I cant sleep at night because my brain never shuts up. I'm constantly going over little details of my days and feeling sick about them. I was depressed for a whole week because I thought my friends didnt like me anymore because I over thought dumb stuff. I have this obsessive need for people to see me as a happy perfect person and when that view gets shattered I get really depressed and anxious. I'm not sure if its worth talking about it to anyone but just curious if others can relate.",4.2179666666666655,5.6759495300000005,5.127000000000002,82.0526666666667,71.2,7.733333333333332,30.333333333333336,8.238735603445708,2.2677333333333336,806,34,150,12,15,263,126,200,0.217,0.634,0.149,-0.9283,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,3,8,14,2,2,8,0,13,4,3,3,4,34,35,15,0,5,9,0,4,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,9,7,0,0,8,0,1,2,6,6,0,0,12,6,22,8,25,22,4,26,1,2,2,0,4,12,2,3,14,101,31,5,0.0,0.0,0.1185861313856994,0.0,0.146043598555453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18592515561190767,0.1372831737719555,0.1205153297498663,0.08496971040763801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963102083254074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356566702097315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132010521093307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348417241271385,0.07837043998952753,0.0,0.2093302445121725,0.0,0.0,0.12696268659253854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18433270875251487,0.08681401539841077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938861620744592,0.0,0.1904677795782521,0.0,0.06906269846207606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12936045330938462,0.10885818034107167,0.0,0.12471472665682752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654453030799706,0.0,0.0,0.1370800158620851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187372086113018,0.12179510911753196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149852988100562,0.0,0.0,0.12208331840853855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933128837798594,0.09010564725303342,0.18744765359080093,0.0,0.0,0.11403842346412067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424676727325407,0.10610670278848863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784891616627175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683582177401648,0.0,0.0,0.1372831737719555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160790473639113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13911149183116006,0.0,0.0,0.11453129790998895,0.0,0.09136802517621484,0.09767328892040872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073258421076784,0.0,0.0,0.3858936827010982,0.14171874680923688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350133516693395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265067558975264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026684570076183,0.07167572961096648,0.0,0.09747612980860716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965302901882876,0.1356729014226964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846811237851558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drinkingdrips,2020/01/30,Why do I get so angry waking up from naps? I dont even know what to put here besides the title. Someone help me LOL.,-0.9739743589743596,0.9124613461538472,1.85923076923077,97.16910256410259,89.38461538461539,3.466666666666667,16.358974358974358,3.1291,-1.0693948717948718,89,2,21,0,3,31,24,26,0.139,0.6559999999999999,0.205,0.2481,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,3,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5054321928223786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848424214251715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22531496404738166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289063735179039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370086007929685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4335342865953636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3654042475919572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3891440591018196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wewereevergreen,2020/01/30,"Frustration and crazed in the mind I’m so fucking done with everything damn it. Everything always turns to shit. And I know. I know I’m being defeatist. I know that if I trust in a higher being everything will be alright. But the jealousy is fucking killing me. Depression, anxiety, and a potential personality disorder just kill all my chances of my hard work going towards turning my dreams into reality. I’m incredibly grateful for the things in my life but doing my best is never enough to grow stronger. I’m 17, I have few friends, I’ve never been in a relationship, still have my v card and all my passions and purposes went down the drain when the depression kicked in and anxiety is preventing me from clawing my way out. And even if I do manage my way out I still wasted my youth even if I’m grateful for it. And the scary thing is that usually people with mental illnesses who want more power begin committing crimes and I don’t want to go down that path. I just want to have a successful social life at least and a decent job.",4.648955223880599,6.1834128009950255,5.721572139303483,77.90862686567165,70.24378109452736,9.340099502487561,30.812935323383087,9.725611199111238,3.0602063681592035,827,35,153,20,15,274,114,201,0.192,0.626,0.182,0.2151,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,4,8,15,7,0,11,1,16,7,1,0,5,35,35,17,2,6,7,0,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,8,15,0,1,3,1,0,4,3,9,0,0,3,1,21,6,22,28,7,26,0,2,0,3,5,12,4,3,8,110,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052885531787516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936002415824615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279231130205904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21797150458039904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502185848130994,0.0,0.0,0.12949083174577294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074609012872887,0.0,0.16715240678968385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3411686985592233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776183109296976,0.2339620184215157,0.0,0.0,0.14382728429179056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335190196774472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556800925017358,0.0,0.2799879077247584,0.0,0.2086235497552498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787530265850822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275190890996921,0.0,0.1277658524145245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19518558906033484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772451712068814,0.11048684200780738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358529086818722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298879587660935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898808611231105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20210451790297074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813053355088922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27527087919267057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936214207116626,0.0,0.22390362169034392,0.20087766045098346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11730065730509764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212012152124313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,misswilwarin,2020/01/30,"I’m not sure what happened...TW I’m not sure what happened...


I don’t know if i was sexually assaulted or exploited. This past summer was a really bad one. I had sex with 5 guys I met off Tinder and one guy I dated for a few weeks. On another occasion, I went to this guys house who said he just wanted out and offered to give me a massage. He said I should get naked because it was the best way to get a good massage. I was in a lot of pain, so I said yes. I said beforehand that I didn’t want any “funny business” and just the massage. So he was giving me the massage and kept massaging my closer to my genitals. Then he touched me and started fingering me. It hurt, but I didn’t say anything. Eventually I told him to stop and he did. Then, because I was a really bad place, I agreed to hang out with him. He asked me to be his sugar baby in exchange for sexual favors and company. He would give me weed instead of money. I wasn’t sure but eventually I said yes. The next time I went to his house, I gave him a bj and he gave me a bag of weed. I feel really dirty after. Another time, he came by my place and let me use his weed vape pen and then got upset that i would blow him. We never saId that’s what would happen but he said it was “understood”. So I later told him that I didn’t want to do it anymore. He was upset, but understood. Then like a month later, i was really hurting to get. So  agreed to blow him and let me use his pen again. He said he’d would come by another time to give me the weed. I felt disgusting after and wanted to scrub my skin raw where his demon got on my arm. So I told him that I didn’t care about the weed; that I just didn’t want to see him to talk to him again. So that was the end of it. I felt violated and used, but I don’t know if it was actually sexual assault or exploitation. 

There was also another time where I voluntarily went to a guys house, had sex with him, & slept over. When I woke, pretty sure he didn’t realize I was awake because I didn’t move or open my eyes or speak, and just started having sex with my. I didn’t say no but I was pulling away because he had a big dick and it hurt. I don’t know. I’m so confused about all of this. 


What do you guys think? I feel really insecure about it and only told my therapist about the first incident that happened.",1.262783650458065,2.7726944646464657,3.560140944326992,90.0416067653277,79.10101010101009,7.271317829457363,21.612638007986845,8.133680483312611,0.90833004463237,1780,50,415,33,43,615,187,495,0.151,0.772,0.077,-0.9915,0,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,1,1,0,2,23,23,4,4,19,2,42,11,6,3,6,78,103,41,0,12,18,0,7,1,0,5,1,11,0,5,24,26,1,2,11,0,2,8,16,14,0,3,55,21,74,9,45,39,4,52,1,3,2,4,63,16,1,8,28,265,98,2,0.0,0.0,0.058103092320818936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047614641835603384,0.0,0.06451227690800639,0.0,0.04048968844863441,0.24973428094714956,0.0,0.0,0.0590483326229398,0.0,0.0,0.048996887460768086,0.0,0.05566247683182327,0.0,0.05594040714446007,0.0,0.09942792304356697,0.14518172731291598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062484246081588035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06809864971611324,0.06070566791706914,0.0,0.0,0.0512890038552712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273534943685821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021109028091956,0.0,0.11433673574964248,0.0,0.0,0.05064525236843677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332260738806043,0.22846729412342576,0.0,0.04993987814568512,0.09524020497914698,0.0,0.0,0.29477305664803805,0.15795481886190818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20610577204735284,0.19121851407868545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816596377835113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176871142803435,0.0,0.02908855746132712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0506193373279825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04752478431065341,0.06328229556755706,0.0,0.0,0.0459214251896095,0.0,0.06332216411925255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806925801203807,0.04528335260014522,0.06335545690213584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05683829420560053,0.0,0.0,0.12441462781836007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060574253350527366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907163472755826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4530943953106185,0.09469824035569208,0.0,0.0,0.047446194818499314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428636685849555,0.0,0.0,0.04977865524774858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22446545808778454,0.0,0.0,0.047856524680464516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691312917916496,0.0,0.03815124881449232,0.0,0.0,0.13887454347702669,0.0,0.0,0.2275745970222672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15427203207455314,0.0,0.0,0.1755931105131851,0.04726060208170467,0.04775992355231371,0.0,0.0,0.1655843564597275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691838975131359,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,surprisingly-awkward,2020/01/30,"I’m having a breakdown and I don’t know what to do For the past couple of months I’ve been feeling really really low, everything has become super difficult for me and I constantly feel exhausted ( even though all I do is go to college and go home and sleep) it feels like everything I do is unfulfilling and all I want to do is be in bed, nothing seems to bring me joy although I do feel slightly better when I’m with my friends or bf but I’ve noticed a lot more recently I’ve become more aggressive and I’m starting to push the people I care about away. These negative thoughts are getting worse and worse and I’ve started to think about hurting myself again (I’ve been through a really dark period before and I’m worried I’m relapsing) and I constantly can’t breath and feel so overwhelmed all the time and I just can’t figure out why this is or what has triggered it and I don’t know what to do to help :// 

TL:DR: I’m worried my mental health is severely declining and I don’t know what is happening or what to do",2.9136134453781497,4.483460523809526,4.567647058823528,84.31676470588238,74.71428571428572,8.369747899159664,27.59103641456583,9.007467420416297,2.2405070028011207,810,32,166,18,17,273,108,210,0.158,0.737,0.105,-0.9387,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,2,9,12,1,1,6,0,25,4,2,1,3,39,51,22,0,1,5,0,5,1,2,0,2,0,2,0,9,16,0,0,12,0,0,4,6,6,0,0,3,5,16,6,19,47,6,19,0,3,0,0,3,4,0,5,12,107,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936400728244034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.280624905345789,0.10810688660108,0.0,0.0,0.11236196455397753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12953198157150067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274583433028021,0.0,0.0,0.14057410995379166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391276085376648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283617126256277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211916656333769,0.0907617700456217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815551341061488,0.0,0.06637635152897957,0.0,0.1444064700331741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234646004774702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504407945647334,0.0,0.0,0.08515633296547896,0.0,0.12743761219892705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136005493894503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20946366702458466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06206831451339175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801006388542128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803260250241286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140699701923836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190417393567048,0.14464284415018888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212798924748382,0.08807777964480687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24416698369351256,0.0,0.1254427117495637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156580117109226,0.0,0.14352594787651587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271378663313879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798477884068144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140602068853978,0.12482216308300555,0.1008604242374911,0.07408161141967583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493509036470379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463935816053734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580429937927641,0.25894169037495457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throway696969420420,2020/01/30,"Was Recommended here. please listen. I feel like I have no one in my life, no one will listen to me everyone gives the same ""oh I'm sorry you have to go through that"", that ones mainly from my gf, it feels like my feelings matter to nobody unless they will profit from me, I just need someone to listen to me. 

I've been Diagnosed with depression since I was 12. Resulted from Neglect from my mom, and severe trauma. 2 days ago I turned 18. 

ive been steadily decreasing in my mental health I used to have a breakdown once a year then a couple times a year, now I'm about to clock 2 in only month.

I've tried therapy I really have, I've been to many therapists and I cant, idk why I just feel like I can't trust them and I now trust anyone with knowing my personal feelings because Everytime I tell my peers something they either belittle me by saying I'm crazy or psycho, I'm currently having my 2 breakdown this month 

about 1 hour ago I was going to go to the store with my sister(22) and for no reason at all my sister and grandma just started screaming at each over which way my sister was going to drive, I tried to diffuse the situation by pulling my sister outside but she went back inside and it got worse this got me really worked up, I then started to breakdown I got in-between them and in a mix of crying and yelling I begged them to stop fighting because it's all anyone does in this house besides me, I hide from it. anyway continuing I then started to get worked up even more when my sister said I was getting mad for ""no reason"" I then punched my wall because i dont know I just wanted to release my feelings somehow, then I hid in the bathroom for 20 mins, while getting screamed through the door. (there was no physical contact btw)

My sister hasn't always lived her, she comes and goes whenever her boyfriend kicks her out, she recently just moved back in. there is barely any fighting when she isn't here it's all okay and fine, sometimes my grandparents fight but I hide from that too. 

just please listen to me",3.7263673923406975,5.169824876847294,4.5729143492769735,85.60384315906566,72.39901477832512,7.209153027173051,27.38248847926268,7.717688229018142,1.5676624185603054,1604,58,317,20,31,518,201,406,0.156,0.794,0.05,-0.9904,2,0,1,0,6,0,37.0,0,1,5,2,22,17,4,0,10,1,23,3,0,4,3,49,60,22,0,2,11,6,6,3,1,2,3,9,1,1,12,16,0,2,10,0,2,9,10,9,0,3,14,15,63,8,50,44,8,54,0,2,0,0,33,14,0,2,33,212,75,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679678249505605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883372763150774,0.0,0.0,0.06442845776080967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249295298276806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570296736141972,0.0,0.1732632766059924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161266596742099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483127683209753,0.10407068645153117,0.061101367598858675,0.0,0.0816019676628482,0.0961621042349676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291019772113938,0.0,0.11103803676621883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257682773661781,0.0,0.0,0.09053095290102768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874293062406135,0.20305315632909926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849784966505622,0.0908860747831592,0.21537841699826246,0.0,0.2273237863294839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070732998196362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330272541633602,0.10932064876598477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413649982128524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669197504651432,0.13885986537764092,0.0,0.08365976436955815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605448510956516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547861409811703,0.0,0.0,0.11096180294439603,0.1512458443554062,0.10069676658919646,0.0,0.07025070008891597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089815419520058,0.1926008332896437,0.07205628598420856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272589324046965,0.0,0.20799862597123125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138952504244525,0.19482307276083324,0.09354723744159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012224540503457,0.07534339991921432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070325707868827,0.0,0.07837235079798559,0.106495050145345,0.0,0.0,0.08027539767912427,0.07293775489961017,0.093703204319189,0.10605698055716012,0.20117865196136775,0.0,0.0,0.07920935205732965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280951797471504,0.0,0.1083468251092821,0.11000387219079047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05524537852280703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286484936827562,0.10305312809417584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182749306488221,0.0,0.0,0.05588184911889334,0.07520254715800953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782766777398453,0.08549077988209679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379479981467285,0.0,0.09655116449249113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202271252777873
mentalhealth,floebd,2020/01/30,"I don’t feel bad enough to go to therapy Hi, since I am 10-13 (I can’t remember) I’ve always had the feeling there was something wrong with me. I could never figure it out. Today I am 18. I often feel empty. Void. I often overreact, need so much attention and my relationships never really work out. I don’t fear things like WW3 or Coronavirus because I want a legitimate reason to finally die. I’d never kill myself but I still wish I was dead. I can’t be thankful for being alive. And sometimes I don’t have those thoughts at all for a few weeks or even months but they always manage to recur. Since forever I’ve been googling all kind of mental illnesses because I wanted a source/cause for my behavior/feelings and wanted them to be reasonable. I often wanted to go to therapy but I don’t think my state is bad enough, I wouldn’t know what to tell them, I feel like my feelings are pretty normal and common, aren’t they? I feel so misunderstood by everyone and I hate living this way. I also hate having sex, I often cried. As a child I used to be hypersexual and now I feel like an asexual. What should I do? I don’t want to go to therapy because it could be possible that those feelings will wash away until tomorrow all out of sudden. It’s always like that.",2.4600611413043474,4.417259109374998,4.561025815217392,82.18682744565218,77.046875,7.733423913043477,23.630434782608692,8.587818076936951,1.7037430706521737,996,32,195,21,23,343,138,256,0.16899999999999998,0.7020000000000001,0.128,-0.9296,1,0,1,0,0,1,29.0,0,0,4,1,11,13,3,1,6,0,29,3,0,3,6,54,54,16,3,12,5,0,8,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,11,10,0,0,16,0,0,3,12,7,0,0,5,8,36,6,25,39,7,24,0,0,0,1,8,5,0,6,18,139,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376334088596928,0.2302502303521392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08666139578963042,0.0,0.15403110258329242,0.1686837624312787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475466346279868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472903642041826,0.0,0.10131999863635864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957293193648356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19061468989050406,0.0,0.06092286230757809,0.0,0.0,0.0881381331980771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379430214585043,0.4197484120071354,0.13179084475405586,0.0,0.10104310481784376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572643195261924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821334519313851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204857397934328,0.09605252372994978,0.05069203624789075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802528883707006,0.0,0.08144855675367754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295502297592753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362413599040503,0.0,0.06780613651075547,0.06839390687143378,0.21342076363354276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037444701693742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398539611378207,0.0,0.09384002749059836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05909054187653924,0.18967371254586746,0.0,0.09902995964782584,0.10448858780861907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15260178916333633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100994025257372,0.09122653897612476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366203067260918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062078318454488,0.08492110110235628,0.31644934457424456,0.0,0.0612793649935804,0.0591029032885545,0.0,0.07322730983447047,0.0,0.0,0.08743160413530444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966471413265606,0.0,0.0,0.2720241919015501,0.07321487188468641,0.07398840747013477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607007628992154,0.0,0.0,0.06715095028523903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008486559099382,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,donthejester,2020/01/30,"I feel usless I'm constantly in a state of doing feeling like I mess up every thing I do. I feel like I mess up with my chores,games,art,family, and relationship. I'm always a hair trigger from exploding into tears of frustration then straight in wallowing. I just dont know what to do. Hasn't helped that now the only thing I thought I was good at(games) I keep getting told I'm doing nothing and messing up. Which I guess I an I dont know.",0.9860869565217384,3.22436282608696,3.0045217391304355,89.9078695652174,83.78260869565217,6.288695652173913,23.33043478260869,7.554174236665415,1.1276965217391304,348,13,74,6,10,117,60,92,0.12300000000000001,0.738,0.139,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,1,0,4,0,8,1,1,1,0,14,21,3,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,6,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,4,13,3,11,18,0,11,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,5,46,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16692356819481385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21678811298189507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4702267889449967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902255462025198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18911722886010326,0.0,0.30430329024722697,0.2866316098113478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048104311021704,0.0,0.0,0.16826212760667386,0.0,0.0,0.2209945023985483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13446463632902578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17831136161161726,0.0,0.0,0.22049998968385792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960157993647319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19249067972308312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525729244159554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215380034981797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665527043112234,0.0,0.0,0.15926191033359066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916914263011002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cataguid,2020/01/30,"I'm going to study pshycology in college soon. I used to have conversion disorder and now I want to help people, I know all about the practice... I went through it for a looong time and now I want to know the theory to help people who re going through that and other things. Plus I always wanted to study pshycology but then with the conversion disorder I couldn't (ironically enough). 
You guys think is a good idea?",4.6065416666666685,6.161037237500004,5.540000000000003,79.09166666666668,70.375,9.333333333333334,27.083333333333336,9.725611199111238,2.497583333333334,329,11,63,8,6,108,52,80,0.07,0.8029999999999999,0.128,0.3506,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,0,3,0,0,1,1,16,14,6,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,8,1,13,12,2,9,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,5,44,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769168755912416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4873618892148741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196933005820211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416736957005885,0.17833557129431415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21052723158893444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850294130913852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400221038179787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337007869208799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2948078782200348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125528269351625,0.13623831305867662,0.0,0.0,0.12398043391778113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836354165335322,0.0,0.0,0.3762263606734907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19710087344428345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Beeby55,2020/01/30,"Helping my self feels harder than just suffering through it all. My life feels like a comedy movie but I'm the punch line.

My whole life has been one shit show, in a nut shell I mum was a self obsessed cunt who denied my any love and didn't want to help me while I was being raped by a family friend between the ages of 3 and 8 he only stopped because my mum wouldn't let him touch my sister. My dad was an alcoholic who was so under my mums thumb even after they split up he would do everything she said. Along with the rape I was bullied horribly u till I turned 14 and over a summer I grew from 5 ft 2 to 6 ft 2 and put my self in boxing. The bulling then turned into daily then weekly fights that lasted untill I left school. My mother put every thing I did down saying I wouldn't amount to anything. This made me so self loathing I got with the first girl who showed me any affection which she used against me so well we had a child, she then stabbed me and kicked me out and i haven't seen my daughter for 5 years now (it hasn't got any fucking easier I think about her constantly) and no amount of court proceedings have helped(fuck the UK laws on this shit) spent thousands on this not to mention the child maintenance. Then my mother turned my family on me sided with my ex and I don't see any of them now because I had the gall to say no to her for once. Then when I get happy and marry the love of my life have 2 amazing twin boys and have a steady job. My brain goes fucking you and I try to kill my self I still do t fucking understand why, she left and came back and is helping me get through everything. Seeing professional and talking through stuff I got diagnosed with autism, PTSD and depression with non psychosis hallucinations which made me feel like a failure and I dunno if I feel worse now then I did before I tried to kill my self. I am currently start g a therapy cal EDMR which I have been told is amazing. That's my story in a nut shell not that you asked or anything and there's obviously more to it but I worry people get off on this shit and I don't wana be another person's amusing play thing I just wanted to get it off my chest. If I spelt anything wrong or my grammar is fucked up I dont really care. Thank you for taking the time to read this.",2.643234510326451,4.093744322784811,3.663766377970244,91.01218520986008,75.18143459915612,6.93040195425272,23.022207417277368,7.573540080772713,0.7788700421940926,1795,50,397,23,38,578,244,474,0.215,0.6729999999999999,0.11199999999999999,-0.9962,3,0,1,0,1,0,24.0,1,3,2,1,15,30,13,1,21,0,34,18,5,4,2,58,74,37,2,7,10,9,5,2,1,3,5,3,0,11,21,28,1,1,6,5,1,4,12,17,1,3,22,11,71,13,52,46,5,51,0,2,3,8,52,19,8,5,30,254,92,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496758388860232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19081397699243452,0.07355698630424809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17317911019185486,0.0,0.06557952765556327,0.0,0.0,0.05393998946289925,0.0,0.0855239439862342,0.0,0.059691342902064015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830910402948342,0.0,0.0802313791363869,0.07152123395523853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580578060943713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06041893800237546,0.07119941320478307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221370699052456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046332528291782575,0.0,0.059103271472543725,0.0,0.1260901846552925,0.0,0.1322598270102658,0.0,0.141877080755116,0.10022843333159803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059668414295571515,0.0,0.0,0.054196680645714056,0.3242565286946992,0.14659911812369888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16831287462887326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746745528977243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14105750422953986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06961172085839863,0.0,0.15521819763369393,0.0,0.0,0.057180520454669974,0.0,0.0,0.15243344851844354,0.07173175748902001,0.14864421913916875,0.06854218378600517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662380873521198,0.13275271628673646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074706033414062,0.04753454742583296,0.05335121689159252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0486322482510386,0.0612511040853572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200002954600805,0.1410375568262347,0.0,0.0,0.07016764314724105,0.0,0.0449390278061667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672743946884868,0.1115700598646154,0.0,0.07099418890091923,0.1117987995630161,0.0,0.4390821069275773,0.0,0.2160197740447969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04965158254710929,0.0,0.05602081042972088,0.058647420745210635,0.0,0.0,0.08030343269269981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052743062154118836,0.056382835662594576,0.0,0.06458346128797744,0.08022110613899193,0.0,0.0932073052619646,0.044948428800312905,0.0,0.0,0.040904247722042486,0.0,0.0,0.06703005071179738,0.0,0.09525267081833184,0.2289047949063467,0.0,0.07302722890585295,0.0,0.060585919334734416,0.0,0.0,0.08275099422411822,0.0,0.05626902368878923,0.0,0.06307206978671624,0.0,0.06329825465498888,0.07831847365165262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123936924942012,0.07148747742984714,0.049831595346362056,0.07669654750535652,0.0,0.045173437076653326
mentalhealth,Lord-of-Rats,2020/01/30,"Looking for ideas on what I mental condition could be. I am a 24 year old male living in the United States. I have OCD and Aspergers. Recently I got a SEVERE anxiety problem under control but now a new problem has surfaced. Very often I will talk to myself when I'm alone or when my mom is around. It's not logical talking, just the same 1-5 phrases/sentences repeated over and over to myself. Also I occasionally get extremely hyper, these phrases get ramped up and I end up running around the house, rolling on the bed, and giggling like crazy. After a while this passes and I'm left feeling extremely drained. I am aware of myself doing this but can't seem to bring myself to stop. Does anyone have any idea what could be causing this behavior?",3.5372115384615337,5.7825074861111165,4.709166666666665,81.02942307692308,74.83333333333333,7.20854700854701,28.43803418803419,8.139509932561175,2.1881726495726497,594,25,105,10,13,195,101,144,0.145,0.785,0.07,-0.8707,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,8,4,0,0,8,0,13,0,0,2,0,26,22,12,0,4,5,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,7,7,0,2,5,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,1,2,13,2,17,16,1,28,0,0,1,0,4,12,0,3,13,75,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16438774795630676,0.0,0.12692963573769794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793615593418472,0.0,0.12142161783927763,0.0,0.0,0.11098185902897313,0.0,0.0,0.2825918156830202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630508430518894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17801981223285204,0.25345262364148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13889837411576936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14058025927469006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025442870193036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585100864221172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694419257972375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18314345868463455,0.0,0.3583548169426366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724515229775288,0.0,0.0,0.07754337448235386,0.0,0.14015411335676056,0.0,0.13328619998624822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599540783349754,0.0,0.0,0.18589286289931664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532943460395322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16655165814333284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037503415036195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15671846818362786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14449421712667113,0.0,0.1793102714545631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13269839558857424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551488790501173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13096197317204766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221153031325486
mentalhealth,AnthonyG14,2020/01/30,"This sounds crazy but it feels like there are other people in my head. I don't know if I'm somehow making this up or if they're real or what but I have 3 different ""personas"" that I have talked to and that have come out. So there's me: Anthony, a 14-year old Mexican-American who likes film. Then there's Jonathan: A 26-year-old linguistic student from England who wishes to become a professional translator. Then Cliff: A 40-year-old aggressor who likes alcohol and had something to do with clowns (I'm not just I just associate him with clowns) and then Mark: A angsty 16 year old Chinese boy who hates just about everything. I feel kinda bad because I feel like I'm just making it up and that It's disrespectful to people who suffer from D.I.D and stuff  but I never created these ""personas"". They just kinda showed up. So yeah any advice would be appreciated.",4.073584415584417,6.170321557575762,4.596731601731605,83.09795454545456,72.81818181818181,8.108225108225108,27.54329004329004,8.841846274778883,2.2047835497835497,687,26,130,14,14,218,100,165,0.111,0.7509999999999999,0.138,0.6777,2,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,0,12,7,1,0,5,1,9,2,1,2,1,35,21,17,0,4,13,0,3,4,0,1,1,1,0,1,17,9,1,0,4,2,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,4,11,4,14,18,0,13,0,1,0,0,9,5,0,7,11,84,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524575044602405,0.0,0.14791065106549814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411874474735113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556067320162808,0.08436914717359804,0.15285517266471432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922187715334187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14460161398040908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243876375490918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099420539243756,0.19775017494735392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13664424888697915,0.14204134494711174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606263587706083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27046674051290603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847700733676182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674487904095507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5809224115633255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19190234307881102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15753284515669844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065493444112358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584382528590129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11124303998066104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15915654977517432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831747708803312,0.0,0.0,0.3565078207030197
mentalhealth,little_doodle,2020/01/30,"Just Need A Place To Vent To give you a background, I've had mental health struggles for the better part of my life (24F). ""Officially"" been diagnosed with clinical depression, PTSD, and bipolar disorder. I've been through some shit, seen some shit, and don't think I'll ever really be 100%.

Five years ago my husband and I moved five states away. Since then, we've gone home a bunch of times to visit and see family and friends, seeing as all of my closest friends still live back home. We're planning to move back after we graduate school in May. I still keep in contact with my friends (there are three of them specifically that are basically family to me) on a weekly basis, and have since moving away. 

I say all of that to say this. Recently, I've started overthinking our texts/snapchat messages with each other to the point it makes me want to throw up. They'll say something jokingly, nothing out of the ordinary, and I overanalyze it until I'm left an anxious, crying mess for days. A part of me knows that it's my own brain and not their fault, so I never bring it up to them. I'm terrified of pushing them away or coming off as the ""crazy friend."" I don't want them to feel like they have to baby me or walk on eggshells when we talk. I just can't take it.

Just in the last two weeks I've had four different instances of breaking down sobbing in the middle of the floor for no reason. Nothing happens, nothing around me is falling apart, I just have an overwhelming urge to cry. I'll have anxiety so bad it makes my stomach twist into knots...I get paralyzed with fear (again, going back to not wanting to be the crazy friend). In some ways, the worst part is that I have a toddler that I stay home with. She's the absolute light of my life and I know she deserves better than what I'm mentally capable of giving her right now. All her needs are met (attention, food, water, games, etc.) but I don't just want to meet her needs. I want to excel at being her mom but I can't right now.

Idk if I'm looking for advice or thoughts or reassurance...maybe I just needed to get it off my chest. For a lot of reasons, I can't afford a therapist at the moment. Don't worry, I know that no one online could replace seeking professional help.

TL;DR: Life fucked me up, now I'm having severe bouts of anxiety for seemingly no reason.",3.576063114950798,5.087891131749462,4.488036357091435,85.7926352891769,72.8876889848812,7.736237101031919,26.25203983681305,8.344100000000001,1.6457233501319892,1826,62,371,30,36,591,242,463,0.11800000000000001,0.807,0.07400000000000001,-0.9593,2,0,1,0,0,0,72.0,3,1,7,4,22,22,3,3,21,0,28,15,5,5,5,70,69,23,0,11,15,2,1,1,5,2,7,3,3,0,16,21,2,1,11,2,0,12,13,12,0,6,8,9,48,10,69,55,15,71,0,3,4,1,37,30,4,11,26,245,64,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698601384461052,0.06337242228589003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938077703322377,0.080764435405974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06364211112627645,0.0,0.0,0.2015043300237611,0.16491640548395986,0.05969196519792159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645588846576655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980755454228533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06158313156804891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05707971407470095,0.0,0.15705892462035784,0.04610575472844269,0.0,0.06157505886156087,0.0725618192564183,0.0,0.07469283684616218,0.0819348335406463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973131788437368,0.0,0.06466766601345607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479062860814908,0.08044720536986796,0.03614797730414932,0.05107315591803793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644715228492507,0.0,0.2761686907447673,0.06609224028345717,0.07470215156020095,0.137161285806032,0.040629959926247336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321921958963596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599154712850467,0.0,0.0,0.04791888334447554,0.0,0.2151337848871831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354444982213701,0.0,0.0,0.11786868545791053,0.058274673953927485,0.0,0.0,0.07767513692995431,0.0,0.15148853729546213,0.034926871777829466,0.0,0.0631278272196023,0.0,0.060034400717668066,0.0,0.0,0.060779057424337514,0.0,0.0,0.09544154151675448,0.0,0.07182227809019072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14409214511596766,0.0,0.0,0.08372934799704346,0.0,0.2279507286705375,0.0,0.21203856313431835,0.055138235424188164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20579251195784012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04844412451586362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322532279439842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469283684616218,0.0,0.06758206486827853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356910619227799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04579893943579812,0.22051384022508294,0.07058869800298714,0.0,0.0,0.1221057779845394,0.0,0.17055744185080166,0.0,0.07235266797028113,0.11393807788336012,0.06508268472852638,0.0,0.080764435405974,0.14676888562706925,0.11827612131715655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05503723353497428,0.0,0.0,0.05060166926117934,0.0761998509008287,0.11418554558329988,0.0,0.0,0.07473787346475994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05375230455972504,0.0574617254042015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300651441560009,0.0,0.04580852031866446,0.0,0.05675583641054529,0.041686953535555474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983627961669456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21083610158798344,0.05674619620602565,0.1146914712596748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260253986293254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04603783414505869
mentalhealth,WindowsKidd,2020/01/30,"I tried addressing my toxic brother with my mom, and the conversation literally made no sense. Long story short, my adult brother and I rent from a landlord and there’s no lease. He moved out 3 months ago and it was very peaceful, but still paid a little to store a lot of equipment at the house. Broke up with his girlfriend and came back unexpectedly.

He kept asking for ‘his’ room back and ‘he makes the decisions cuz he’s on the lease’. It turned out he wasn’t on the lease as I learned from a friend there *is no* lease. 

I tried addressing to my mom that he’s been harassing me by walking around the house and saying random BS comments about me, and my mom just got angrier and angrier and said that it’s my fault her blood pressure is going up and she ‘feels weird’ and she just immediately took his side. She also made a big deal about the lease and said that my brother still controlled the room even when he ‘moved out’ because he’s I’m a ‘sublet’. I think she also said he can ‘kick me out’ whenever he wants, and I said no I have rights and I’ll contact a lawyer if I have to.

I guess in all hindsight (few minutes ago) I shouldn’t be surprised as mom has her own mental health issues she literally never addressed, so I shouldn’t be surprised.

TL;DR - Mom got mad because I tried addressing my brother being an asshole and nothing made sense.",4.67869817578773,5.511997201492537,5.098756218905475,85.02576285240467,69.5223880597015,7.895854063018242,28.321724709784412,7.984000788550335,1.6353550580431182,1062,36,218,13,18,338,138,268,0.126,0.8320000000000001,0.042,-0.9743,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,16,9,2,1,16,0,14,2,1,6,2,47,36,25,0,4,4,9,1,0,2,2,1,5,8,1,6,24,0,2,4,0,3,6,8,6,0,0,16,6,33,3,25,15,4,34,0,1,0,0,42,18,0,4,10,135,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17125842565804478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15450042092130986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599361807468088,0.09030705439024092,0.0,0.0,0.14855738479299133,0.0,0.11777174580758927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104835575749848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834402762781856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995893596601493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380274915152477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04884337272057932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746321719874086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054899455634882924,0.0,0.15451813970075173,0.0,0.10641472368979374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026802531378421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22292462505946328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082429150052398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681760687667562,0.0,0.0854871029398059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212504202943736,0.0,0.2742130173563743,0.06448060352182394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734910325396197,0.0,0.0,0.5656780900160144,0.07710442520540035,0.20533896560245773,0.0,0.0,0.07450312810917736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926893758590034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249504495443194,0.3675511990317685,0.07681942692112027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15428822241701542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06189675878340031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732507815572742,0.19675320405446106,0.10507200698550503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970431752274096,0.056976611477697975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1want2be,2020/01/30,"Very afraid cry for help I started taking straterra and I don't even know if I have ADHD. However I do notice my thoughts aren't getting any quieter.  I can't maintain eye contact when in conversation and I panic over every thing.
I don't even like socializing,  it just seems overwhelming for me. I always wear a frown and can't find humor in anything... I smoke marijuana to keep myself on this planet...

Yesterday I had enough of the constant depressive panicky anxious thinking so I took Alprazolam. 

It DID knock me out but when I woke up I felt so relaxed and ready to have a day. Work didn't seem like a mountain to climb it just seemed like something I had to do to live and im happy here now.

I spoke with a coworker about the experience and told me to take a natural route as the medication can be abused... but I feel normal. Not even high.
. Like a functioning person...

Should I speak to a therapist about taking it or is there a more natural way out of this personal hell??",2.2594041450777205,4.683026170984455,3.947593264248706,83.9480220207254,80.03626943005182,7.176062176165804,25.712176165803108,8.238735603445708,1.8844385492227984,773,31,150,16,20,258,122,193,0.14,0.743,0.11699999999999999,0.3256,1,0,2,0,1,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,14,12,1,3,11,0,17,3,2,0,0,28,35,15,0,3,7,0,2,4,0,1,1,2,0,2,7,9,0,1,9,1,0,2,7,5,0,0,10,5,22,7,22,23,2,18,1,2,1,0,9,8,1,5,11,104,29,1,0.0,0.15667910365369234,0.0,0.0,0.15892305697727802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003169456288582,0.0,0.0,0.08992562699346271,0.0,0.0,0.1493900579223123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881970186624898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429011115114023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452560259247217,0.08528186119065598,0.0,0.11389544870412052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663606745466358,0.0,0.2620236770388843,0.0,0.11141529207253116,0.0,0.0,0.12935306304267366,0.0,0.0,0.06686295020941678,0.0,0.1269681620755869,0.0,0.12086213146006484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690883226781915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14076863960653366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863560702702833,0.13971554577633138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14283854459647588,0.0,0.0,0.11753823315736744,0.0,0.0,0.07267394226709181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584170803253915,0.0,0.11676760590774266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321476531056026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295640860195775,0.0,0.15055258777482913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551515108030844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23092832194932875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611505234622728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479886715952408,0.0,0.10180242657977484,0.0,0.0,0.0935979588527417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29827707646085244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535372337359089,0.08785232086416359,0.08473206640202073,0.0,0.10498132805833348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263580253956128,0.14692006217508094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10910929195012732,0.0,0.10496349656227544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627003855882534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ColaMelon_,2020/01/30,"I'm confused I normally lay in bed alone with the lights off listening to music, and I eat a small meal once every 1-3 days. But lately I've been hyped I am eating more I can't stop talking I am always moving... Even if I try to be less hyped I can't, when I am asked to keep quiet in class I can't no matter how hard I try. And the thing is I am still sad but I can't stop moving and talking which idk is confusing me.",0.3681249999999992,1.4555895625000022,3.1025000000000027,94.1925,80.45833333333334,6.0500000000000025,18.25,6.6274283507984215,-0.21235000000000026,322,6,81,3,8,114,61,96,0.13699999999999998,0.794,0.069,-0.3839,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,3,0,12,3,0,1,0,15,16,8,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,4,3,3,0,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,1,4,13,0,7,14,2,12,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,3,6,50,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20245704512243964,0.0,0.0,0.16265399026493413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18274625567991654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606763055850745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4000471516818228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911187933493418,0.0,0.16469928872878553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751105756755155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737505062308166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22050855908126787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4155259781465253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19152768363545536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20817850282214412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15610959261487492,0.3268579975983619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31423685013629804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986740410895622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654344969818505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ResponsiblePitch8,2020/01/30,"Coming out of many years of illness Hi everyone. I'm a 34 YO male.

I'm coming out of a long term illness, and just a bit lost and confused, wondering if I should speak to someone like a counselor.

I started getting ill around 18 with heavy metal poisoning which totally messed me up, I also started taking a lot of drugs every weekend. My 20's were a disaster, I also have narcissist parents so my self esteem and personal boundaries were non-existent. 

I went to fairly popular with respect from my peers to completely losing all that, in some ways I feel it was a good thing because I can now see the prison people live in with the fear of what other people think.

But I digress, so besides the fact that I got extremely anxious and awkward, people started rumours about me and some other shit came out which meant I was completely ostracised and a laughing stock, so I don't have contact with people from in my youth.

I've seen some people and they act weird around me, I've had to learn to build my own self image back up away from the reflections that these people reflect back at me.

I'm coming out of the illness now and it feels like coming out of a fog in your mind, and all these things from the past I am remembering and it feels like I am reconnecting with who I was before all this, and it is intense as F. And a little scary, and weird but also I feel happy I came through it

I want to move on now, I feel like I can thrive. But I need to tell someone what happened to me, to just share it with someone, so that's why I'm writing this.",5.622910898118569,5.415960153354637,6.233839190628331,81.34054934327303,67.27476038338658,8.872488462903801,31.765885694000712,8.344100000000001,2.275297621583245,1220,45,244,15,18,399,160,313,0.111,0.8,0.08900000000000001,-0.1761,1,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,1,2,17,20,2,3,16,0,15,7,1,0,5,65,46,25,0,4,6,1,5,4,0,1,6,1,0,4,23,32,0,0,12,1,0,9,1,10,0,0,13,8,32,10,45,32,11,41,0,2,2,0,15,17,1,7,18,171,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22321217249523664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510872161432376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656506581812828,0.0,0.0,0.08741414634665501,0.14308403995327784,0.0,0.056716322806779115,0.0,0.07917019059243867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10157558710088008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21282595662636106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205829001137565,0.19510134784229144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789686626903383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839021606190287,0.08890371086106576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046958710398702,0.2352191075368852,0.1994033921132415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04860956194928959,0.0,0.0,0.07803754101195096,0.07441259047894735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227496817281457,0.0990428142154187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18181858507902168,0.09325052638632993,0.08215602800897569,0.0823374756466919,0.0,0.10408796564441014,0.10156415492464554,0.07909928416738674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432796074095436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394388120772376,0.0,0.0,0.09888679986918072,0.0,0.06898798398068706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330991378050897,0.0,0.08881721141128016,0.38701334322036696,0.08123894267869372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539618734540222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414083717241833,0.0,0.19412203066152287,0.0,0.09550422697487873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364974801156959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19756258088817036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995450395581637,0.0,0.08132106430622495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362328879590664,0.05961627770361964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487740487918137,0.07385082443416374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624901573626788,0.08395413206612423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100897915400578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059914712070425126
mentalhealth,PurpleTable7,2020/01/30,"Has Anybody Tried Any Alternative Therapies Besides Talk Therapy? (ECT, ketamine, EMDR, medications, etc) How did it go? What has helped you the most so far?",5.185256410256411,8.601497269230773,5.943846153846152,67.8844871794872,76.30769230769229,9.620512820512822,35.5897435897436,9.725611199111238,4.779066666666668,123,7,18,4,3,40,25,26,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,2,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21688046409489328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3556865444353588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18125286813484792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21376922497022968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212841666029965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25634045803624633,0.0,0.0,0.7294388389722658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21652966705030186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kburke652,2020/01/30,"DAE feel guilty for being ""lazy"" when you're just struggling too much to do anything? I've been dealing with a bad bout of anxiety and rebound depression from that, and some days I can't even make it to work. I've just been watching TV/playing the Sims because I don't have the motivation to do anything and it distracts me for awhile from my constant anxieties. I feel this enormous sense of guilt for not doing something more productive though. I think ""what if I'm just making up my mental illnesses in order have an excuse to be lazy?"" Does anyone else deal with this?",5.890193050193048,6.541366693693696,5.796087516087518,81.75081081081082,66.74774774774775,8.505019305019307,32.07335907335907,8.418075326091056,2.391989961389962,457,18,86,6,7,143,80,111,0.22699999999999998,0.7609999999999999,0.011000000000000001,-0.9718,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,7,5,0,3,4,0,11,1,0,3,0,17,17,6,0,1,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,3,7,0,15,13,3,7,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,2,3,58,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31174807899699675,0.0,0.0,0.1424720818725821,0.2087737846365504,0.33535035849805944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701291212838551,0.12420876821190292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22018962629589398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314068235493781,0.4201303667726456,0.1754961596989566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17830968684552528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17021336545827176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345800017873768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20605197347926454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720196183587433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053397802468302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14978531256036376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568625885938418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21301172941825489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305596705232845,0.20019085011503485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833799114339052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LostSoul2137,2020/01/30,"To those who reported me to crime stoppers To those who reported me to crime stoppers

I made a post about a month ago about somethings. And people on here reported me to crime stoppers who then had the police come and take me to a hospital against my will. I thought you all should know that it didn’t help, instead all they did was transfer me to a psych hospital were I sat down on a bed and watched tv for 5 days until I got out. There was no therapy involved. But I’ve learned now to keep things to myself . I wish I could just vent on here but I can’t have the police showing up again. So now I keep these thoughts to myself until they consume me. I just wanted to let you know that by reporting me you might have thought you were helping me but you didn’t you just made it worse. That’s all I will say.",2.8342170329670324,4.134140910714288,3.4976190476190467,93.0037912087912,74.41666666666666,6.8358974358974365,26.613553113553113,7.321109707123232,1.084250366300366,635,23,143,7,13,200,89,168,0.079,0.88,0.040999999999999995,-0.7184,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,6,2,0,13,0,0,0,7,0,17,0,0,2,3,32,32,10,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,12,5,0,5,6,2,0,4,4,0,0,0,15,2,29,0,24,11,3,23,0,0,1,0,15,6,0,1,12,111,41,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643406535488489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15970057202202415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802207611853227,0.0,0.0,0.11956383535811672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14827657072054265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485314691187225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295735285629809,0.0,0.0,0.203775460496162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18957799340689735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508486959462405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19667380653767094,0.0,0.0,0.1479797747886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285289021352814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17755626765870294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14743280252584653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272540960884414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13939326512170927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120142718242996,0.0,0.1231675796116675,0.0,0.0,0.4415465392663697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935022357311833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131940265246413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889323920014892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EleanorRigbiesRice,2020/01/30,"Helping my best friend My best friend is the most important person in my life, but she has gone through some serious stuff. Her mother died when she was very young, she had an abusive step-mother and a very shitty dad.

Luckily, she got out of her parents house as soon as she could support herself, but she still isn't in a great place mentally (she was never diagnosed with anything, but she keeps telling me about insomnia, nightmares and other stuff). For the last couple of months her physical health has also started to decline, she has become severly anemic, and regularly has to go to the ER because she fainted and hit her head.

My problem is, that I live 6 hours away from her. I also work full time, so I can't just check in with her as much as I would like to. She struggles so much with everything and i desperatly want to help her, but I know that this is out of my control.

I'd love for her to go to therapy but she really doesn't want to go. Many of the doctors she spoke to about her physical health have also told her to see a therapist, but she keeps saying that that's bullshit.

I'm slowly getting overwhelmed by the situation, I have no idea what to do. I'm so scared that I am in some way enabling a bad situation, but I am also so scared to lose her, that I never speek my honest opinion with her. 

Has anybody ever dealt with a similar situation? What did you do?",4.786557971014492,5.4268300471014514,5.695797101449276,81.53688405797102,69.18115942028986,8.886956521739132,30.18840579710145,8.998388855275968,2.364675362318841,1087,41,218,19,18,358,147,276,0.185,0.6970000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.9846,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,0,6,15,18,0,5,11,0,23,9,1,1,3,37,43,25,1,5,8,3,0,1,2,1,7,2,0,1,12,12,0,3,2,0,1,4,6,9,1,0,8,3,45,9,39,32,8,26,0,2,1,1,41,9,0,4,13,166,57,2,0.0,0.11694930992242188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31573747961527143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122582234929444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273661671879363,0.0,0.082414569906738,0.060169664861492014,0.10901194120946957,0.0,0.0,0.207169660559214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070607449023626,0.07880792783866754,0.1092152287123164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018351893491348,0.1024402286369591,0.0,0.0,0.10102877183054552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928434277042581,0.0,0.0,0.08870970864315791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15251850927655114,0.0,0.051569299750213966,0.0,0.1682890148555337,0.0,0.07894342244025995,0.10882263448580637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129982829336703,0.20983764405737435,0.0,0.0,0.1323197903822275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720456340666808,0.11389234223559674,0.0,0.11142595467546887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17546711637612702,0.0,0.0,0.054245698368711744,0.08045776637515606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06971827562615332,0.048222287643125326,0.0,0.08715834220233618,0.0,0.0,0.11042567111191604,0.0,0.0,0.08908513545995607,0.0,0.0,0.10007139927225332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947144584113338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878540633211797,0.0,0.14511909565925873,0.0,0.15225479485668386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960024524544576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618541740323653,0.10312573900657816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444737501730953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323296415641326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849419469839984,0.19764189118147085,0.0,0.07865512262515104,0.0,0.0,0.11150857884597894,0.0,0.0,0.33284573869062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986392213584393,0.0,0.07882595754396063,0.0,0.0,0.10318791946151007,0.225987268927862,0.0,0.11200928850830368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627253925038568,0.0,0.11287779412928504,0.1146041374636686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05755569170764376,0.0,0.0,0.09431687780036983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16288395966185046,0.11643755788956325,0.07834745159849099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185843110606947,0.0,0.0,0.07011721517395643,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cheezyoyo,2020/01/30,"Should I be worried about my friend’s mental health? I have a friend in college, who we’ll call Sarah. I’ve been friends with Sarah for about a month, and I recently noticed that she tells extremely fantastical stories that simply can’t be true. At first I laughed off, but she doubles down on them and insists they’re true. In the past month, she’s insisted that-

1. She noticed and stopped a terrorist attack in Paris.
2. Babysat the kids of a prominent sports coach in my area.
3. Has a fully stocked underground fallout shelter at her house.
 
Frankly, I’m worried that these stories are getting more outlandish and that she is suffering some some kind of mental health issue. Should I suggest she seek medical help, and if so, how do I go about doing that without patronizing her or making her feel terrible? Thank you for your time.",4.618461538461538,6.729297764331214,4.452484076433123,84.65080842724159,71.35668789808919,7.6333170014698695,32.459088682018624,8.384062270229773,2.5817137677609017,667,32,123,11,13,204,108,157,0.151,0.7120000000000001,0.13699999999999998,-0.7553,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,2,1,1,5,11,1,0,7,0,13,3,0,2,2,20,19,10,0,3,4,0,1,0,3,3,3,0,0,1,8,6,0,1,1,2,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,1,21,8,18,13,4,18,0,1,0,0,22,10,0,4,7,81,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17853118924887107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602436674107762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934881615756298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348507063025056,0.0,0.0,0.3637325289766517,0.0,0.08198975064151635,0.0,0.08918726471333943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33361973489655544,0.0,0.0,0.10518725938615768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18107681867128853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16379475300076546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634190492687167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475238030452763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809104876457922,0.3162982270447364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505209824701602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3573330094461735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14980799505830816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495001486564014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13120099122589698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716424335042876,0.14448059318062945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150748282344326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512754784162024,0.0,0.0,0.31874124185060226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DiscoTulip,2020/01/30,"This is ridiculous 

I’m not sure if i should be even posting this here but I just discovered Reddit and I’m on a roll here. I’ve got pretty bad anxiety, I’ve been seeing doctors for it since I was young. I’ve noticed working out does help to improve my way of thinking. Anyway, I haven’t stepped foot in the fitness center I pay monthly for since November.  I worked out pretty consistently for a few months then got sick over the holidays and got lazy. I kept telling myself every week that this would be the week to start back up and guess what? It never happened. Shocker. So I’ve been kind of cycling through this mentality for quite some time now and I’ve dug myself into a hole. I have a program I want to start but every time I fail to start I kinda tell myself the week has been ruined and I’ll try again next week. Im quite ashamed of how much weight I’ve put on, I’ve definitely lost some muscle mass and I feel incredibly out of shape. It’s hard for me to look at where I was and see where I am now. I’m a little nervous to go back to the fitness center because those mirrors don’t hide anything and i know a good amount of people there that might say something. Is it crazy for me to be worried that they’ll notice all the things I’ve become pretty ashamed about?  I also feel kinda horrible that I’m paying for this gym and I’m not even going. Can anyone else relate? Or should I just bite the bullet and go.",2.645765536723161,4.175392450847461,3.84375,89.39760240112993,75.33898305084746,6.137005649717515,23.817090395480232,6.6274283507984215,0.6382683615819209,1123,34,237,9,24,366,162,295,0.17800000000000002,0.698,0.124,-0.9473,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,6,19,11,1,3,13,0,21,4,1,1,3,41,47,18,0,5,8,0,4,0,0,5,2,1,0,0,16,14,1,1,4,2,2,5,5,8,0,0,10,8,24,3,32,29,6,46,0,3,3,0,5,19,0,8,20,146,40,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131842918637266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778967594583265,0.0,0.0,0.07110136566585269,0.10418954371820692,0.08367909050093666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15638084483348294,0.0849037418687532,0.061986972685904175,0.11230443509605452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408014959641876,0.08898629176701316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494578432206537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13432557161554118,0.0,0.17135004321156375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028312109990946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17337185758307072,0.08528957245099716,0.2439832654112699,0.0,0.11201882973721212,0.0,0.08992078386739677,0.0,0.091090875195617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815812628430447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983856135722188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589054475150572,0.05588408429479412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191630109286133,0.0,0.0,0.08539081005085854,0.0,0.11100251542450924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247578760120146,0.10787300449590928,0.0,0.0,0.1623299329188173,0.0,0.07475106799697842,0.0,0.07842667756089924,0.0,0.10814444297697097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23154085889785936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704964178096478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738728505138004,0.3103543117225993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222273173091323,0.0,0.2163116123511939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086495934408472,0.0,0.0,0.16206149557239802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682317752523727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828301604294388,0.0,0.0,0.2159220784992074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958380539820084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777564673616713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755580269228571,0.06515642049360516,0.0,0.0,0.11858809910318545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903826494748329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05997716405042621,0.08071378415394809,0.3262661913740449,0.12382641512302295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480575508099449,0.10326728703100096,0.0,0.07223496942861196,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ninadutcos,2020/01/30,"Let's transform your life! Go check my advices! Haven't you checked my eBook yet?
👇👇👇👇👇👇
My clients have been getting good advices and already started changing their lives with it. What are you waiting for?

You can find it at amazon kindle: the link is in my website too!
Book title: Make it work. To have a healthier relationship.

ninalifecoach . com


#lifecoaching #lifecoachingtips #nobaddays #selfcare #selflove #lifechanges #selfempowerment",3.9370153846153855,7.137222906666674,3.3373333333333366,81.4112307692308,93.26666666666668,5.5076923076923086,33.769230769230774,7.010146845296331,2.914815384615385,358,21,54,6,13,106,60,75,0.0,0.9179999999999999,0.08199999999999999,0.7037,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,4,1,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,8,1,0,1,0,6,13,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,2,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,9,1,5,11,0,5,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,2,31,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5370148437178527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30322157821940704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29067602708868784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511398134874545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355884892941118,0.0,0.15616123919428598,0.23046863850870644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809765479794568,0.1940820497216945,0.0,0.0,0.2426317856121594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834147685713194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950060368917117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19448750113141006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20003982418663588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Danny120,2020/01/30,"My mom has really disturbing dreams, HELP ME Is there anyone I could talk to about this privately, its raising concerns and I would like some help on what to do. Please help",2.391363636363636,5.2013268484848485,2.6456818181818207,90.78852272727272,83.54545454545455,6.936363636363637,20.37121212121212,8.07648339933343,1.1601575757575762,138,4,27,3,4,42,29,33,0.081,0.54,0.379,0.9058,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,4,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263081412332001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584133688552066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6508203629376947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812221112164074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3790625660746936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3552776307184509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20734263339356387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601428245155469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299162823433253,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Half_Alive-,2020/01/30,"I need help  A couple of months ago I started having suicidal thoughts again, I have them since I was 12, I don't know what to do anymore 

Now I'm going to have to go back to my abusive house and I feel like I don't have anyone, I'm tired and I just want to die.

 Please help",-0.9722350230414776,0.8691573064516122,1.3771889400921675,100.96435483870968,88.83870967741936,4.188018433179724,16.921658986175114,5.288315135182226,-0.8840857142857144,211,5,54,1,7,71,41,62,0.231,0.597,0.172,-0.7906,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,0,0,8,18,2,2,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,1,10,1,6,16,0,8,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,7,32,11,0,0.0,0.2693177876258361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20149106927284516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225424252424516,0.1589360746647309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17478256147283014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515072879982123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359054171306504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11493161120156943,0.16238585217146514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25836393102099176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30471383908545524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622780216382853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12492020245840653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104913599676808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814316933092096,0.0,0.0,0.16854285851767115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495112713792756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880280198705989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16088677185842706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486334214809101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804537960415259,0.0,0.2612522353675432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13406964738900184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,R3e0ver,2020/01/30,"Gender of psychologist? I’ve (F27) attempted to find a therapist a few times now. I always went straight in each time knowing I needed to have a female clinician to feel more comfortable, although I’m not comfortable in that setting either way tbh. I’m trying out a new place after basically being wrote off by the last therapist I attempted to build a relationship with. The only therapist with availability is male, and my initial though was to say ‘no thanks’ and move forward. 

I guess my question is, should I go with my gut instinct of knowing I wouldn’t be able to open up  fully to a man, or give it a shot because it can’t hurt? 

Therapy is fucking scary.",4.390472440944883,6.175959582677168,5.808669291338582,76.03741338582678,71.28346456692913,9.174488188976378,31.59763779527559,9.642632912329526,3.259857322834645,525,24,94,13,10,177,89,127,0.057,0.8640000000000001,0.078,0.3722,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,2,5,1,0,9,0,10,2,1,0,0,21,23,5,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,3,8,0,0,5,0,0,4,4,2,0,0,3,2,9,3,19,16,4,20,0,1,0,1,7,9,1,3,7,62,12,0,0.16814144707122242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990715349374666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249746550212883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501736772441715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367823648394782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15544405842216313,0.0,0.16129659724538387,0.09555865919174404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18522676038330985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17999889667386765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18481228406323716,0.13705772090304125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17870774860946714,0.0,0.1246747524907716,0.0,0.16239205733706116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278791472414504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756720251066757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883569016976632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805209889745396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371282741456045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480205394732569,0.19228439839835773,0.5856755386517701,0.0,0.0,0.1651981180467201,0.0,0.19608925988985795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415700546690255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346285434498786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586880597209726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jaluvvv,2020/01/30,"Mental Hi so I'd say about a week ago I had an intrusive thought about something, for example "" Now I need to promise God that I'm going to do this"" it was something evil. (I was on a path of seeking him) anyway, I freaked. But then thought wow, I'm kinda tempted to tell him all these things since its that easy. But no, that's stupid. I do not want to. So now, it's kinda like something in my mind wants to feed that, like I owe it, to promise him something.  I just wanna keep that option completely out of my head. I feel like it gets in the way of my thinking. I'll sit there and think ""wow, I really like this donut "" but something in the back of my mind will be like ""but now you can't have it anymore because you need to give it up to God"" or when someone is telling me something (gossip) and they tell me you can't say anything though I'll think ""I need to tell God that I will because what they're saying is bad"" it's super annoying!",1.2336571747627048,2.9149803417085423,2.656340033500836,95.70908849804579,79.7537688442211,5.427247347850363,23.11585706309325,6.139981653823899,0.2632878838637631,724,24,168,5,18,235,107,199,0.086,0.77,0.14400000000000002,0.8341,1,0,6,0,0,0,29.0,0,3,1,1,13,16,3,0,5,0,13,2,1,0,1,29,31,12,0,6,7,0,1,5,0,2,0,3,0,0,19,3,1,1,6,0,1,1,4,6,0,0,5,4,24,10,23,23,1,17,0,0,0,0,17,6,0,4,13,106,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049423593989076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124309781643302,0.0,0.0,0.09329252392948433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08717329276288789,0.09465786880062656,0.1382166344781502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886459817212112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05732246344577264,0.08099039922867056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05923030376085048,0.10875328826336483,0.06442986762659554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11634867314081047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076703245282463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769303402392592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424867084174185,0.0,0.2289395089061505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521836702388448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262669248611986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704652778670087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377950228949926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605666748270354,0.5236591437888631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3963558730307589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531691969303897,0.21792565675619385,0.11138386586772517,0.18000367382128946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373522534483956,0.08998654974072821,0.09093728279050813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rtheybackfrom711yet,2020/01/30,"I just feel like nothing is enjoyable anymore. I wake up feeling like shit, I sit through classes, I come home, get high, binge eat, hate myself for that, then wake up feeling like shit again.

It's like i can't break this cycle.

I feel like I'm broken, nothing is fun anymore. YouTube sucks, videogames suck, porn sucks, drugs suck.

I'm not sad just fucking bored. 

Every fucking day I have to numb my mind because I'm so fucking bored.",3.4260168067226933,5.2128257529411774,3.3057142857142883,92.99000000000004,73.82352941176471,5.327731092436975,29.789915966386555,5.288315135182226,1.0172857142857143,339,15,69,1,7,102,56,85,0.34600000000000003,0.485,0.168,-0.9640000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,21,10,0,0,0,4,11,4,0,0,9,21,2,0,0,3,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,4,0,0,1,2,14,0,0,0,4,9,7,5,21,0,9,0,1,0,4,0,3,9,0,8,27,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29003400629458365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913807584165029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259608409435732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430374016487778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695758570479108,0.14962580988778726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12320179938982315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295745247356157,0.4178558319639612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40555103097103146,0.07639710413572985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443680045212604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15449590735865476,0.14667670496652044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35719344150292426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764668077092175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806157812599109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001979890793409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Irtexx,2020/01/30,"Exercise makes me suicidal I'm posting this to see if anyone else has had a similar experience, and maybe has worked out how to get over it, or has had advice from a therapist. 

I worked out for the first time in about 6 months today. The time before this was about 3 months ago, and before that 3 months again, and so on. All together its about a year and a half since I have been regularly exercising.

People tell me it supposed to make me feel better (which when I used to work out regularly it did), but to be honest it puts me in a headspace where I end up feeling suicidal. I've noticed this before, and to conquer it I have tried to only spend a short time in the gym, and head back before I get in that headspace, and I planned to do this until I got back into the habit and it was no longer a problem. But I'm finding it hard getting through that phase. The first 15 mins of working out are okay, and then I pack up and set off home, where I will feel pretty good for about 10 minutes, but then that mood will crash and I'll start feeling like total shit, and I start imagining confessing to my old friends that I am depressed, and then them ignoring it and saying that I'm just milking it, or that it's my own fault. This trail of thoughts leads to me thinking about killing myself, and how they would react if I did.

I don't actually want to kill myself to spite my friends. That would be selfish, and they haven't actually done anything wrong because I haven't ever told them about my problems in real life. In fact I've not really seen them in about 2 years so we're not even close friends any more anyway. Sometimes I feel suicidal because my life is pretty empty, nothing feels worth the struggle of every day life, so if that's how I'm always gonna feel then what's the point? I'd be better off dead. These thoughts can cause me to get in to a bad place, and if I ruminate on them for a few days then I will start to feel strong emotions again, and because I feel like I've not felt strong emotions in a long time I'll let myself wallow in that sadness, which is stupid because that leads me to feeling overwhelmed and despairing, and I may start thinking about plans to end my life. But other than times like that I've never seriously considered suicide for any other reason.

I know that goes against what I said, because o just told you that exercise makes me feel suicidal, but it's a different kind of wanting to kill myself, if that makes sense? It's not a serious consideration of actually doing it, where I start to make plans and research methods, it more of a fantasy of doing it that I start to get emotional about. Does that make sense? Has anyone else thought this?

Anyway I'm getting side tracked from my main point of posting this. About 10 mins after the ever so slight ""high"" of exercising I'll feel desperately sad. Does anybody have any advice for me.

If anyone's still reading, thank you for just listening to me ramble. I finished therapy about 3 months ago so I don't have an outlet for these rambles anymore.",7.363717737506863,6.052874677100494,7.2891383855024765,78.84083552992863,64.17298187808896,10.267962657880288,34.56611751784734,9.120678840339163,2.7900232180120823,2407,87,488,33,30,771,259,607,0.184,0.706,0.111,-0.9961,1,0,1,0,0,5,57.0,0,2,6,16,36,37,6,2,22,1,38,11,2,15,6,100,92,49,9,12,20,0,14,3,3,7,8,3,1,0,48,27,1,1,24,7,2,3,10,21,0,3,17,19,55,15,77,64,7,85,1,5,2,0,18,32,1,9,50,320,103,8,0.0,0.0,0.16220804298973884,0.0,0.0,0.10828637502070756,0.09823012147212712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046103154837082085,0.0,0.0,0.11303620620143705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494896567459905,0.11622582065519603,0.11354226564600545,0.045595331276094164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520929640527487,0.046262623242092425,0.16887830266178408,0.0,0.18858948178583826,0.0,0.0,0.09800617395386936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05691836548193613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146600562477487,0.0,0.047722063426406364,0.0,0.0,0.05788863808453396,0.0,0.0,0.09697427225509146,0.056700711385240264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257106293785214,0.18697662649629165,0.09814850910517173,0.0,0.0,0.036595874190295814,0.10023780784587573,0.04668288061948312,0.0,0.0,0.05419878624789231,0.0,0.0,0.3361860008007501,0.07916570219079004,0.05319951545602182,0.0,0.05064109557504391,0.09425852044782387,0.0,0.0,0.12842218930629504,0.0,0.17368757159582984,0.0,0.0,0.046472855847496566,0.04431412811991757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049633888297662784,0.0,0.0568636807317919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058540654723737436,0.05557784984897572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18389927688193694,0.05769797972286678,0.030450299127639142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056657524838388006,0.1565427240368279,0.08120734698841127,0.0,0.0,0.049033549583391865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22190806060048465,0.0,0.05566389011750908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17690170921197496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042733379663496635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05316461724333185,0.06308136299163708,0.058140442406715,0.0,0.0,0.042139604576903335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03841231428982676,0.0,0.05788863808453396,0.0,0.1047552579164434,0.0,0.10612939259772146,0.1127379019955426,0.0,0.10603424446854208,0.0,0.05569944999779985,0.0,0.0,0.0554221048476958,0.06306542236062837,0.035495214020521325,0.05696773804299314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0527048505633927,0.04406195846356811,0.0,0.0,0.04415229380175949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05687460311378119,0.045833334694952814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0547990494328942,0.0,0.2353046296286877,0.0,0.044248190334307366,0.0,0.0,0.05792354248266154,0.0,0.3030319319144124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04842825709089716,0.0510114235334713,0.06336286008785744,0.06433192625365146,0.0,0.07100527884291867,0.0,0.1319611710526651,0.16154165967995016,0.0,0.052519462546548,0.10588773776254932,0.0,0.0376177912805114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047853954088462464,0.0,0.0,0.06536109911111468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16134814651292168,0.0,0.0,0.07871924374654214,0.060578977811445625,0.0,0.0713607256478447
mentalhealth,Medthrowaway293875,2020/01/30,"Extreme mental/physical health issues, desperate for concrete help. Can't find treatment in my area I am in the eastern USA and desperate need of help right now today this minute.  I will find a way even on foot to travel to someone who WILL HELP.. I have been begging for this immediate help for over 2 years. This post is looking for either a knowledgeable reader of it to directly volunteer concrete help that can move my life forward, or refer me to a specific person by name who will do this. I do not need to discuss my feelings for months,  I need CONCRETE HELP. Please do not tell me to call a help line or look something up or go somewhere unless it's the address of the person who can help. I have already done everything suggested on google and whatever else I can find. I feel like I'm living in groundhog day. My entire personality and abilities have changed.

​

I have no income or way to make money. I'm unable to sell anything. I'm about to be homeless. I've been to multiple people and doctors advertising themselves as mental health professionals but it's been a very negative and damaging experience. One therapist told me that the help I needed wasn't from therapy and I would need to hire a life coach. I have no money. I have no one to borrow money from, stay with, or rely on in ANY way. I am completely and totally alone. I have no access to transportation or a phone and I'm in a large amount of debt. 

​

I suffered a physical injury which left me in crippling pain for years. At times it was so bad I would black out and collapse. I couldn't get treated properly for a prolonged period and believe I suffered some kind of brain damage from not sleeping for months. I thought I would recover mentally once the injury was resolved but I haven't. I may even got worse. I lose HOURS EVERY DAY staring into space or lost in loops of thought. I bounce around like a pinball in rooms turning this way and that not knowing which way I should walk, what object I should interact with, what I should plan to do. My anxiety and depression are EXTREME. I am unable to plan or focus on anything. It takes me hours to ""cook"" with 1-2 ingredients. I'm exhausted. I forget I'm making food WHILE MAKING IT and leave it out to spoil, or put it back in the fridge without eating. Or accidentally throw it away. Or leave it cooking until it's black hours later. I have trouble reading anything and just skip through it against my will. I can't follow shows or movies or understand the rules in games. I cry uncontrollably or get filled with rage and destroy things sometimes hurting myself in the process. 

​

I have told this to every single professional I've spoken to, every person, they do not help. It's very easy to get off track and during the sessions I ramble about what's happened to me and then the time is up. I ask what to do and they say come back next week. This repeats for weeks and months while I get worse. Each visit I'm begging for some direction or feedback. I've asked for more than one session a week because I'm desperate and I'm told that ""the insurance doesn't like that"". Or ""that's for people who really need help"". I have intense anxiety even anticipating these sessions now and I can't go back. They try to convince me I'm fine and I think they're just trying to convince themselves because they know they don't plan to help me. I was fed SSRI's for months and they did not improve me and instead left me with lasting sexual side effects. NOW I'M WORSE

​

No one is taking me seriously and I am not searching alone again. I can't make decisions and when I've looked on my own I spend weeks trying to decide who to contact and then waste more time asking for help and they don't help. No one is treating this like it's important. I've asked for a recovery PLAN and they tell me I just have to come back every week again and again and again. When I've asked specifically WHAT WE ARE DOING they answered sarcastically ""therapy"" and then refused to discuss it more. I feel like these people aren't human and don't care at all. They're just computers checking boxes for the insurance company. I've asked them to refer me to someone else if they can't handle my case and they say they don't know anyone.

​

PLEASE is anyone here willing to actually HELP ME?? Does ANYONE know of a specific person who WILL help? Someone who's an expert in whatever system is set up someone to hold my useless hand and walk me through step by step what to do?? I feel pathetic and worthless and everyone is looking down on me and therapists have literally said YOU NEED TO HELP YOURSELF. 

I CAN'T!!!! I never used to be like this. I was completely self sufficient and had my own business. Something changed. SOMETHING IS WRONG!

​

I need testing, I need someone to help me plan and think and organize and there is no one here. No one cares and I'm going to die if I don't get help. PLEASE don't just respond telling me to look for something or someone. I will not. I'm done trying. Every time I try and fail I get worse. I don't trust any decision I make. When I say ""I can't"" all people want to hear is ""I don't want to"" ""I don't feel like it"" ""I haven't tried"" I try EVERY DAY. I try to plan and write things and make lists and I get lost in it. Waves of thoughts hit me over and over and over and I turn around and forget what I was just doing.  PLEASE SOMEONE HELP ME. I'm not going to make it through this. All anyone asks is if I'm suicidal and I don't know why that matters. Why does it matter how I'll die? Just another box on the insurance checklist. I'm dying right now but everyone seems to think that it's ok if I die slowly and miserable. It's not right. There has to be some help out there, where I'm not. This is my last attempt to find it.

​

Thank you for reading.",3.0322100623195,5.033104714039624,4.074268379186304,86.12532261741907,75.50301464254953,6.999108273800478,26.455565688807827,7.895319336613232,1.5921431929877898,4627,175,914,71,102,1498,404,1161,0.18,0.716,0.10400000000000001,-0.9988,2,3,4,0,1,1,147.0,1,2,13,13,38,41,2,2,28,1,95,16,4,10,5,188,193,90,5,22,45,0,6,7,0,14,7,5,2,7,61,68,5,2,31,8,8,19,45,22,0,7,24,19,118,19,131,150,16,126,0,13,8,0,82,49,0,26,58,592,179,13,0.0,0.0,0.029812421005137844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328123241666432,0.03371271621901638,0.0,0.0,0.23170660246333816,0.2598514001930699,0.04155013408692675,0.03203436867827476,0.046741376498064834,0.0,0.0,0.08544516124294875,0.0,0.07542021148494303,0.05439200484709328,0.1999210694390388,0.0,0.028702757501805176,0.09396434496702473,0.025507997793597352,0.037246027741581374,0.0,0.0,0.03441942063309275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03410393540281526,0.03119499488406601,0.0,0.062295580391795786,0.0,0.06463575890909243,0.0526322890845384,0.06406224746719065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03355777188267505,0.05910672329110415,0.0,0.02631269485555504,0.0,0.12682442577831254,0.0,0.0,0.0312692487731191,0.05346907177688832,0.06252657197329707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031260306066271976,0.051041257578779996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060534017270219814,0.0,0.15443830017279656,0.058383723012892415,0.02745639581570316,0.029883790047794137,0.0,0.0,0.07723506189316692,0.06547483957764183,0.0,0.0,0.11168869066795684,0.0,0.03694121583089415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172790321105476,0.0,0.06944914108398308,0.0,0.024433648658288284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027015289385405084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494650360593053,0.03443210252464542,0.0,0.43001784407605503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025687296714872,0.0,0.032704437451820056,0.0,0.0,0.031886292696968827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03181315360705308,0.08394748379243312,0.049804701510854095,0.0,0.06469613839292497,0.06638539089330016,0.0,0.043156777323664366,0.10447640577831184,0.0,0.026976234943732063,0.0,0.12827164895381402,0.03417766759283873,0.06669793006082306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274666914117362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236173011323782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975389654116502,0.03246984561879492,0.0,0.2038721318852836,0.023562065394891956,0.0,0.03249030198351727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032534783398804966,0.1449104300748506,0.0,0.0325073843524602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471817285625692,0.1333755329579344,0.0,0.1341390295432174,0.0,0.0,0.029258482577306438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03071121670324468,0.0,0.0,0.06111659171481105,0.0,0.019571130590254282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826867246926146,0.029060073071249668,0.0728838267593733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0278115986456825,0.03187034252865465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03057209145108505,0.0,0.18119458057511525,0.09407561817882372,0.030214759433565476,0.0,0.0,0.032562265661819155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0334167728025825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045939638997108435,0.0,0.08010621459302042,0.0281263617960198,0.06987324029851028,0.07094187566272511,0.04059216303289242,0.05872567428507805,0.0,0.0727599306774559,0.07125586938081035,0.0,0.028957854978257237,0.08757558451933863,0.0,0.1659317124257203,0.06645931687961043,0.0,0.03180365716244348,0.0,0.02638541590942001,0.0,0.05041394608221079,0.03603839676770572,0.12124595352313385,0.1225269509110618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055133298091418134,0.0,0.0,0.029449137376399825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453235636356205,0.06510559135263694,0.03340166043474122,0.2598514001930699,0.03934643357444854
mentalhealth,ray-eames,2020/01/30,"I find myself suffering by often comparing myself to other people. I found some useful strategies that I wrote about and want to share. Hey everyone,

So I often find myself really feeling down when I start comparing myself to my more successful friends or even people I haven't met before.  I often get in negative thought spirals, where I feel like I can't do anything at all.  

So I started doing a bunch of research about the nature of comparisons and wanted to share.

Link -> [Navigating the Age of Comparison](https://medium.com/@ummerr/strategies-for-the-age-of-comparison-8362b5a8896e)


TL/DR:  Due to the influx of technology, we are making many more comparisons than ever before.  Here are some strategies to deal with it.

I cover strategies for dealing with comparisons:

* Audit your inputs
* Don't Cherry Pick Comparisons
* Keep an Inner Scorecard
* Find Joy in Others Success
* Translate Envy into Emulation
* Admire Human Greatness

Would love to know how you guys best cope when you compare yourself with others and find yourself lacking.",7.253561904761902,10.188820565714286,6.626285714285718,68.33504761904764,66.2,8.323809523809524,31.666666666666664,9.029198982220553,3.3646952380952384,849,35,111,16,15,262,115,175,0.048,0.7390000000000001,0.212,0.9826,0,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,1,3,0,3,14,12,0,0,5,0,8,1,0,4,2,36,24,9,0,4,1,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,5,8,0,1,10,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,4,2,20,11,24,19,8,14,0,1,0,1,15,7,0,6,8,87,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277585474180721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642147515651259,0.0,0.1629266047213504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201144356934133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025419839530382,0.14043364055428284,0.0,0.14834921895854133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569993897858934,0.11091152135712072,0.0,0.0,0.567587305915203,0.0,0.0,0.17022497819824348,0.11994672775209635,0.0,0.08111236841804305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711650470995224,0.0,0.15372314237508528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379944410501036,0.0,0.0,0.08532202478003839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584791688496405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012031117349516,0.0,0.1036314124319998,0.15740039607278974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21526333241963946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09945792379697037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197752623696828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325214780718552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408722979842772,0.0,0.0,0.1831424149441991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028603097550407,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRA_sadmonkey,2020/01/30,"I get obsessed with famous, talented people and then start hating myself. I have no idea why I still do this as a grown ass adult. I’ll discover a singer who is super attractive and super talented. Their music speaks to me, it’s like they know me, it’s like we’re going through the same things at the same time, and I just wish we could talk, I wish we could be friends, I wish they would like me. But we won’t talk, or meet. Ever. And their life is so different from mine. They wouldn’t really like me anyway, right? I’m not cool enough. I’m not talented enough or successful enough. Why do I let myself get so wrapped up in a stranger’s existence that I start to devalue my own?",1.1010238095238094,3.3305651500000053,2.547142857142859,93.42452380952385,83.21428571428572,6.590476190476192,19.333333333333336,7.793537801064563,0.6085333333333334,531,14,118,10,15,172,86,140,0.08,0.63,0.29,0.9865,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,3,0,5,3,6,15,1,1,5,1,12,2,1,0,1,26,24,11,0,7,6,0,0,4,1,3,1,1,0,1,6,8,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,0,2,24,13,9,17,6,12,0,0,0,1,15,4,1,2,10,79,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23221872488560374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519373004199399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4507861101776746,0.0,0.0,0.1315444828903651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235434910228656,0.0,0.15195624805354166,0.0,0.0826479042438666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357625563301651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641661811415035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992131788758057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14870606145284765,0.10271738840965147,0.2841876053505103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081880536826493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316244386732024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419144228554428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20586394489530704,0.0,0.11613592598334944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23377287043917774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661335334117296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479800005412713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26244537917598354,0.0,0.5016918383829654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033051543593344,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gruck26,2020/01/30,"Be Unimpressionable with Yourself Around a year ago i was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder II. I'd spent my whole life knowing something was wrong and spent the last 4 thinking I was just depressed. This year I've decided to make change. I started by going to the gym every weekday at 7 AM. I've quit smoking weed everyday. Attempting to stop nicotine. My whole life my mind has tortured me and now I wake up everyday with the intent to torture my mind. I'm chasing my purpose and not happiness. I seek success and I accept where I am at currently. Never look back. In just three weeks my whole mindset has changed. I'm rewiring my head from this pussy ass victim mentality I've had my whole life. I will be a victor in this life and so can everyone. The only way anyone can ever truly be happy is by learning to control their emotions, control their thoughts, and fight that little bitch inside them who's insecure and seeks attention. If I have to get into my head for 5 minutes or 2 hours for a pep talk, I fucking do it. If I don't want to go to the gym, I'll go and work twice as hard. If I want to smoke I refuse to let myself. Ask yourself what your potential is, and start from there. I'm using the very disorder that has held me back my whole life to my advantage. I can specifically pick out what is me and what is irrational in my head. You have to fight it yourself. It hasn't even been a month and I feel so much more empowered. I feel content with my life for the first time in all my 19 years of living. Not because of anything anyone has done, but because I care for me. I focus on loving me. Happiness takes a little effort and that's something I never realized.",2.6632838773491585,4.631079151335313,4.022454005934719,86.2313862512364,76.47774480712167,6.9859149357072186,26.960336300692386,7.908726449838941,1.6968335113748765,1322,53,263,21,30,435,182,337,0.111,0.821,0.067,-0.3576,2,0,3,0,2,0,32.0,0,2,3,10,12,18,7,1,12,0,29,15,5,6,4,55,56,20,0,5,9,0,3,0,0,1,8,0,0,0,13,19,0,5,10,2,2,3,6,10,0,3,10,4,44,8,38,41,8,40,0,1,1,3,12,14,3,4,22,179,57,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376630289875034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637366030730567,0.0,0.06847999304644235,0.07408022412774505,0.07779608509710143,0.0,0.0,0.12797652439439244,0.0,0.1014558698735669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484464896202132,0.0,0.17606379908639627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18666850004150584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167414908805847,0.08446287746436824,0.0,0.0,0.1907463698216162,0.0,0.0,0.08515925233392023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936072307109696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054963636406210034,0.07527398301715127,0.0701133921114029,0.07951682050268072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415340764365048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707838132126832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693220552644084,0.04347712569924175,0.0,0.1418813652331054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26575616260907314,0.07454553416687024,0.0,0.2562120519003586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195137498942065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04573354802262654,0.06783245921733448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509439011348291,0.3526691555962119,0.0,0.1668093557991084,0.07348159114091468,0.0,0.06988080347798972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510603500700856,0.0,0.05554758210825183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386254176938537,0.0,0.16804964982831044,0.0,0.06642252330279348,0.0,0.061173616802036375,0.0,0.12836321001758114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328980945290702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851086705769512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812807505873464,0.0,0.0,0.11780196897203445,0.0,0.0,0.06957262270907598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06256836391342098,0.0668861767998871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053321698355256505,0.0,0.06606451306287492,0.04852414237154056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718722367292207,0.0,0.06866223143333558,0.09816635798814148,0.06605329174260736,0.06675116323215095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4645406012132346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06058251822075445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098405172600277,0.0,0.16076586766841786
mentalhealth,LilStomper,2020/01/30,"Can I ask advice here? I'm really scared to seek the help I know I need.

I'm messed up in the head. I cannot hold a job. I'm angry about the whole world and i hate every single thing about it. 

But. If i seek help. What are the chances they can/are going to lock me up and throw away the key? 

Or to do a 72 hour hold or a facility??

Gah. I'm terrified. But if i dont do something soon then my life is going to be more screwed than ot already is.

Help? 

NY USA",-2.6730357142857137,-0.9898314761904744,0.45508928571428703,103.48834821428574,101.85714285714286,3.7678571428571432,12.276785714285715,5.602791699666715,-1.4111785714285712,345,6,94,3,16,120,66,105,0.193,0.716,0.091,-0.9208,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,0,4,4,2,1,8,0,9,3,1,0,0,12,19,9,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,1,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,0,0,10,0,11,18,3,11,0,0,0,1,5,5,1,4,3,55,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21648668004493868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24447530102611145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20711033492969255,0.0,0.208144464983072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596436570883822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18665731193446086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518129889358263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21872524416641345,0.22736432823440436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44548150908873146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21817263299075876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21984462739252664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12175279047354365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648051107742425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642693730483399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419244302769904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22180055275767308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705525959705397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14718157404311494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473419051501821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tulmius,2020/01/30,"Happiness and crying To clear something up, i do not need help or anything, i just wanted to tell this to someone and this subreddit seemed to be the best place  


I have recently started feeling that i need to cry because im so happy and sad at the same time. I usually never manage to get a tear out but i just feels wrong. An example would be wen a friend makes me laugh and then i start laughing and immediately i start crying but without any tears because i feel like i am too happy and that its wrong to be this happy.  


Thanks, Tulmius

(Also screw throwaway i dont mind getting stalked)",4.641987179487182,5.595027846153847,5.443664529914532,82.08293269230772,69.68376068376068,7.901282051282053,30.86431623931624,8.07648339933343,2.153462393162393,466,19,90,6,8,152,78,117,0.147,0.541,0.312,0.9812,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,5,14,1,0,5,0,8,1,0,1,2,27,22,12,0,4,7,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,3,12,10,11,18,2,12,0,1,0,1,3,4,1,2,9,61,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012870371775673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514565818420414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303542436778572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265113417777856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313979549511705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4126049607687925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14674271358536933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18992661249275455,0.08944854102725293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673530456652872,0.0,0.1308319086327846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5331445049302649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392420882894076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524600606482148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061170250144448136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357723826354108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642427528559236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856801266042507,0.09656804293483924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081559502212406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362768534439784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398455980370137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608823816275488,0.09639115017251072,0.0,0.0,0.2658683651478161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943721387915444,0.11527460211988423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300972705916879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13789880066257856,0.0,0.07385085704585652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069593708770025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894409206309131,0.2737903426459616,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kimura_yui149,2020/01/30,Medication is not working for me I've been over 5 anti-depressants for anxiety and nothing works. I've tried traditional SSRI'S and some SNRI'S. I haven't been really responsive to any of them. Maybe my doctor will recommend an MAOI? Will I ever be able to find some relief? Anyone with a similar experience please give me some advice haha.,2.8818750000000013,5.857643437500003,5.045625000000001,73.13687500000002,83.375,8.825000000000003,25.1875,9.188382445141503,3.11369375,276,11,45,9,8,95,52,64,0.063,0.762,0.175,0.8038,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,2,1,2,0,0,2,1,7,2,0,0,1,9,8,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,6,2,7,3,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,3,1,29,6,3,0.2503698259063916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446584962042538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17026006716350686,0.0,0.1915322315260404,0.0,0.0,0.17506440366215864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156431641826754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562641258930985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22647384147537666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24490973193939464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288334850466062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401775509551437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515301421148193,0.0,0.0,0.25222125935908823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402366004687285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748308841975757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16039332156142852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16998467708343598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3645444303001759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Scendo1,2020/01/30,I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this but i'm having a really hard time talking to someone important to me So i've just gotten together with a girl i've liked for a really long time and it all went down well i was very happy but just the next day i started not being able to talk to her as well as i did before  and now it's mostly just awkward silence and since it's happened in previous relationships it's one of my biggest fears when it comes to that and now i'm really scared i'll fuck it all up again,1.2759999999999998,2.7938526434782642,3.5680434782608725,89.9642391304348,79.08695652173913,7.034782608695654,21.065217391304348,7.908726449838941,0.7649304347826096,414,11,95,7,10,143,74,115,0.149,0.716,0.134,-0.2182,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,10,9,1,3,5,0,5,1,0,0,3,18,14,11,0,1,8,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,4,2,1,4,1,6,5,14,9,3,19,0,0,0,1,5,6,1,2,11,62,15,0,0.1812829293132517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154258420726928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15615919171580742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169124922444892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039936951318007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16759314699589556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603078956956405,0.1929790491963297,0.16239389706853016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856568230799854,0.0,0.0,0.16042968780112607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19279645193463651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284200454174578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18940207702768014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736189350519972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484034595983135,0.0,0.0,0.19463002284004216,0.0,0.1548146311204195,0.0,0.0,0.18149583730527988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995911245402352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15360043772177712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283129904260361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17085701548239565,0.0,0.0,0.29141670341335235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211415067842514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14957740216765605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32599024931439474,0.16805109166933507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Imtrying0907,2020/01/30,"Recently diagnosed  Hi, My name is Quinn, I am 24 years old, and I was recently diagnosed with DID, Generalized anxiety, PTSD, and Depression. I knew that I had experienced a bit of trauma when I was a child, but I had no idea that it ran this deep. I believe that I have 5 alters including myself. Two of which are children I think. My new therapist says that she only wants to have sessions with me for a while, but I don't even know how to do that. This is all so scary and I just don't know what to do. I just want to be like everyone else.",3.0553318584070794,3.854766601769917,4.955918141592921,84.68927544247789,73.24778761061947,9.543805309734514,26.514380530973447,9.827888789773867,2.22811592920354,418,14,95,11,8,144,74,113,0.132,0.8240000000000001,0.044000000000000004,-0.8546,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,3,0,16,2,0,1,1,20,23,9,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,10,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,7,2,17,1,9,15,2,9,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,0,8,70,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087975145473526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22220970024500786,0.0,0.0,0.21532313783123616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16987316837255753,0.4003668487813501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16475963770006402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302679861623324,0.0,0.0,0.1884608943331401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22264769105811572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167839535556188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635619486099756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19048513140778625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20695880381286808,0.0,0.0,0.15000164765474705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23055030899543535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38947996161954745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568445274888229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22899823175228584,0.0,0.1263764684737965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19266421023668087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23266171236372096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700909907068805
mentalhealth,Gabriella_123,2020/01/30,Has anyone tried microdosing? Has anyone tried microdosing?,10.0075,13.551444750000002,9.57,33.57500000000002,101.5,11.6,29.0,8.841846274778883,6.238800000000001,50,2,4,2,2,16,4,8,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7174388899703786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6966214460939822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,childhoodtraumaTA,2020/01/30,"What type of therapy to recover from recurrent childhood trauma? I [have read](http://www.traumacenter.org/products/pdf_files/Treating_Adult_Survivors_Childhood_Emotional_Abuse_Neglect_G0003.pdf) that common types of therapy for trauma, like CBT or CPT, are mostly designed to treat PTSD stemming from one (or multiple) traumatic incidents. But what about complex non-PTSD trauma? 

What type of therapy would be best for an adult seeking to recover from complex, recurring emotional trauma that occurred throughout childhood? The article linked above talks about component-based psychotherapy, which looks promising but seems to be somewhat new and may not be easy to find (located in Brussels, Belgium). 

Any advice or suggestions are welcome.",15.40608974358974,17.658269480769235,10.912307692307696,47.699358974358965,46.5,13.856410256410255,50.02564102564102,13.023866798666859,7.63149871794872,622,34,63,18,6,174,75,104,0.11599999999999999,0.7609999999999999,0.12300000000000001,0.2098,1,0,0,0,1,0,30.0,0,0,0,1,2,9,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,0,0,16,10,6,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,1,1,5,16,5,3,6,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,7,6,44,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874673066033201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13046019945530934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20132798050446696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21579818366088246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17534153838060135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372507306610192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16110027343802252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18528370578514106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12999816126546965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.448509711019235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918954756791424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746471719631997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15419658669322028,0.0,0.0,0.6581694908754012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13628016082533442,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kayayami9,2020/01/30,"Can you read me? Mental health is getting worse and school scares me a lot Some context: I am a computer science student, second year, my actual schedule it's from 8:00 am to 7:00 pm, six subjects, two are really heavy, differential equations and data structure (I haven't programing or doing math since almost 9 months). 


It's been a year since I started to feel depressed but I didn't notice it back then, it started with low energy, low self esteem (I used to have a good self esteem), I couldn't pay attention in classes, feeling any motivation to go to school. It started to isolation my self, I failed a subject too. It was a bittersweet semester. 


I did the changes that I supposed it would help me to get ready for the next semester but everything got worse, I stared to ausent my classes, always late, feeling sad or death most of the times, I couldn't be able to pay attention (I tried really hard), study or do my homework. My memory is really bad right now, I can't remember simple things. At the end of semester I was really anxious, it gave me anxious in middle of the class a few times. My friends tried to help me to not fail again, but it was fucking hard to me, I got super scared and decided too look for professional help. I finished my semester ok btw. 


My psychology helped me to identify what am I feeling like this (past traumas and depression tendency from my mother), I wanted to take a break (a semester) to feel better, and not fail at school (this semester is really hard) but my mom didn't t support me. This is my first week of school, I didn't want to go. I am afraid of everything. I haven't sleeping well since two weeks ago because I have anxiety. I'm not doing well at anything, even in simple stuff or my passion that is dance. My dance teacher told me that lately I've been doing so many mistakes. I can't remember simple steps or a full dance. We have a dance presentation tomorrow but I asked to him to not be part of it. I'm so ashamed and really sad because I tried really hard to do it well but I just can't do it. 


I've lost so many friends too, I've been hurting people that I love without notice it, I don't have any self esstem, I feel worthless, a shitty person who deserves at the bad. I started to think that my life doesn't have any sense and I don't care if I die now or tomorrow. everything are getting worse. Yesterday I went to the school, i got tachycardia, I was shaking, my head was hurting a lot, I felt like I was about to pass out. 


I don't know what to do, my therapist told me to get less materias, another friends tell me to take a break, and there's others to tell me to keep going. I just feel like I'm going to have a heart attack any time when I'm at school. I really need help.

TDL: My mental health is really fucked up, I can't doing things well, I hurt people that I love, I feel dead inside and I school gives me panic. I want to feel better, should I take a break, keep going to the school or change my schedule (it almost impossible)? 


Note: English is not my first language. Be kind. Thanks for reading me.",3.5481680033769507,4.793222077669906,4.924646123540171,83.68413254537779,72.5598705501618,8.415984240889264,27.188827916139026,8.903607488879933,2.0393700858308708,2396,85,489,47,46,800,251,618,0.212,0.636,0.152,-0.9918,1,1,0,0,0,0,89.0,1,1,0,10,20,49,3,6,24,1,58,11,3,2,0,70,115,28,3,10,22,2,14,3,3,2,3,0,1,5,30,12,0,2,18,6,2,13,21,27,4,6,22,16,83,22,54,86,8,64,0,14,2,5,28,15,2,14,36,311,113,25,0.05010533796617552,0.0,0.048895582073091984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04441535892391621,0.0,0.10034651654410204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04169165504279495,0.0,0.0,0.13629339200900034,0.052539815622432325,0.038330446399783336,0.11320953996869625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04123242389468525,0.0,0.04684172727493199,0.0570020553779717,0.0,0.03852791207805368,0.08367172860078305,0.061087497926494976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862819932796351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0510857314022402,0.0,0.10600960767498403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631130834039208,0.0,0.05200143019622211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044378457385807216,0.0,0.0,0.03309410317196205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509434085946745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280128793538886,0.0715905269091114,0.048108982013793086,0.0,0.0,0.08523914975541026,0.0,0.0,0.1161337794630072,0.09264315512613948,0.10471188426306544,0.048065605825021264,0.14238009122072046,0.042025980254369766,0.12022144794384887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17953816450533766,0.0,0.05142253214364929,0.10651926245362164,0.0,0.059375066737714324,0.16792275931766212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16091640178811878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907185317110405,0.0,0.05217699907462964,0.027536583378418543,0.0,0.11304200732150065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03539088199639541,0.0734368116356802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04207586453975785,0.0,0.05469589525842744,0.08519553311000135,0.09044404751495316,0.0,0.0,0.1015978967078734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098879153728788,0.0,0.0,0.05868276625086781,0.0399936027317934,0.0,0.0,0.037152473219487066,0.0,0.0,0.05328759535969349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409051874086965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05878781830514977,0.0,0.05425919828782776,0.04783121462588135,0.0694734649906765,0.04375004845908463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023779436444263,0.0,0.2888888626947322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351916092756945,0.04278968485219845,0.0,0.0,0.10032836850204507,0.4056742161447699,0.0,0.0,0.20908318026755734,0.0,0.0,0.12434296001968866,0.0,0.050141523442023835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185926441287292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05735862437419064,0.0,0.0568589437488975,0.0,0.0,0.11301893539294665,0.0,0.08758854772921047,0.04613026333479442,0.0,0.058176159247316124,0.06657552027582958,0.032105477403851716,0.0,0.0,0.08765047651359367,0.0,0.0,0.0957555952875338,0.0,0.1020547064348061,0.0,0.09789126920518816,0.0,0.0,0.04327492453260919,0.0,0.0,0.08866027955097942,0.0,0.08038295961814101,0.0,0.18020286496310006,0.04644815027854505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04829975778623823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15318486001893394,0.0355933944987944,0.0,0.0,0.06453238976436544
mentalhealth,Sidney-reddit626,2020/01/30,"Some doctors are not helpful I go to a mental hospital on a regular basis,
but I was dissappointed to know that some doctors don't care about their patients sincerely.
They just listen to patient's story and give some
medicine, that's it.",10.020666666666667,8.102233400000003,9.967222222222222,63.67750000000001,59.444444444444464,12.555555555555555,44.72222222222222,11.20814326018867,5.163888888888888,193,10,32,4,2,64,36,45,0.115,0.7909999999999999,0.094,0.0108,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,8,8,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,4,2,5,7,3,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,3,0,24,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35517860888837377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7131272048752655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.334180886594086,0.1979823381013888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334999242177005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191450824123006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35106728930927045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AG3NTCH33S3,2020/01/30,"Just need to vent So I recently found out that i have dissociative identity disorder which does explain alot of things that I cant remember happening in my life.

My only struggle at the moment is the fact that because I am a bloke people don't take it as serious as it is.

I recently broke up with my ex but do not remember it happening or even remember what happened, its like someone took over for a whole 2 weeks and it just keeps happening more and more.

Think the whole thing of men being told to ""man up"" needs to stop we all suffer just because I am a man does not mean i cant be mentally unwell, had this conversation with my ex and she does not believe me even though I am currently getting help for it, she is the one who told me to get other it, if I had said the same to her i would've been beaten down emotionally by everyone.

Its just a bit of a joke all I need is support and people who at least stick by me instead of throwing me away all the time.",4.754233333333332,4.708594490000003,6.073000000000004,81.20733333333338,69.1,10.066666666666668,30.66666666666667,9.928628108626363,2.707166666666668,758,28,163,17,12,257,117,200,0.08900000000000001,0.8440000000000001,0.066,-0.3919,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,1,9,8,1,1,12,0,17,1,0,0,4,36,37,11,0,4,10,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,3,19,8,0,2,7,1,0,2,6,5,0,1,8,1,23,3,26,27,11,18,0,2,0,0,17,9,0,3,8,126,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565802021913363,0.0,0.0,0.1371067414674327,0.0,0.0,0.12670168853823402,0.0,0.0,0.12277504138877675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288866442403713,0.0,0.2952383372858237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650014628591766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14855493518999627,0.0,0.0,0.10745846607554208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233044243396918,0.0,0.0,0.11750935732790127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39778505489298144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537824638346795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995786338679727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943243172314715,0.05494131253742049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249976187661404,0.0,0.0,0.11333124290891908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501586108523828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620447094598579,0.08552939867349764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592847516499933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220774733712908,0.0,0.3821790737187552,0.0,0.10697333829122492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528532310527467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094019947853897,0.0,0.11756554925757913,0.0,0.0,0.12761603871993268,0.0,0.0,0.08455444229898318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494242350128896,0.0720585641827247,0.1104894425973277,0.0,0.06557518112411417,0.0,0.0,0.21491693215108412,0.12494500818311795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020704756980624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511107467356615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988695728488733,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HallofMasks,2020/01/30,"Is it possible to have borderline personality disorder and antisocial personality disorder? Idk why this popped into my mind, but I was thinking of when I was a teen and a psychologist told me that I’m a “borderline sociopath”. Do you think he meant one with borderline personality disorder or as a synonym for “almost”? I actually have complex ptsd and I am a lot better. I think I was disassociated, I couldn’t feel guilt or empathy. I can, now. Anyway, I’m still curious.",5.1401477832512334,7.230380091954025,8.110016420361248,59.05448275862068,69.91954022988506,12.327750410509033,35.41707717569786,11.765960540728905,5.375355993431857,376,20,63,16,7,139,60,87,0.139,0.778,0.083,-0.3939,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,4,2,0,1,5,0,10,0,0,0,0,18,18,8,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,5,1,11,1,6,12,1,4,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,4,3,47,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.170978632214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17544642500116508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154958051977299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6024138068341481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859089464207877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895635867587734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769110632527236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11872609897096473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4589570137634407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975217322358057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048098520069329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992207023513373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33680040488416185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16741963194778828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809879874386645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,May92013,2020/01/30,"Roommates and Triggers Roommates and triggers

My fiancé and I recently let a friend start staying with us. I am working very hard at recovery after suicidal attempts, a pretty severe depressive episode and self harm and it was working. But now our friend is very suicidal and depressed and it’s genuinely the first time I’ve ever felt “triggered”. I want so badly to be her safe place to land but I can feel myself sliding back into old thought processes. I don’t want to ask her to find another place to stay (she has been couch surfing with us for two months and intends to for another five months or so) because I’m sure she already feels like a burden—I always did. I know what it’s like to go through such a dark time and have someone pull me from the darkness. I just don’t know if I’m equipped to be that person, but I don’t know how to go about this without worsening her depression and anxiety (it’s been about 7 months since my voluntary stent in an inpatient facility). I am really struggling to access therapy for various reasons, so I’m seeking advice from those who may have experienced something like this. 

Is it possible that I can keep at my recovery without falling into old habits while helping her?",5.117609351432883,6.599327055555558,5.7637053795877335,78.25613122171949,69.04273504273505,9.095625942684768,34.70487682252389,9.478462496947786,3.447398994469582,977,49,174,21,17,317,140,234,0.107,0.7490000000000001,0.14400000000000002,0.843,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,3,0,0,4,11,13,0,1,7,0,20,0,0,6,2,43,37,20,2,3,8,0,4,3,2,1,0,0,1,2,12,14,0,2,9,0,0,5,5,6,0,3,6,5,24,7,28,27,1,30,0,3,0,0,16,8,0,3,18,120,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317490507211162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651393965951612,0.0,0.08785387123599231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214268630841338,0.0807710343705012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870625361980027,0.0,0.0,0.08118713980585711,0.08815775318874576,0.06436267847192012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728165586625209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550625650879063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677230849697464,0.07542882294231268,0.10137664975871163,0.0,0.09650134151602607,0.0898092109702831,0.0,0.0,0.1631469910324478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001099201108092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458201389587323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07077034701329726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384740316992693,0.0,0.0,0.17407767438761068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796620988935368,0.0,0.15474819089816486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528270576729925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22158409587600567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219137786560692,0.22062442252715428,0.0,0.0,0.11902945226111898,0.0,0.10741630546035733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763944838639671,0.1085573501492641,0.10425089869011264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014654358277988,0.11927922190767758,0.0,0.0873397037325477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894604969599479,0.08128328216502688,0.0,0.0,0.07473249464772046,0.22507577448525296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037872485705044,0.0,0.23098226939896546,0.0,0.0995111325257738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074385301774165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838214490293896,0.12313309333317687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313966849064576,0.0,0.2540077304507809,0.0,0.0,0.1742347734208225,0.12455168427068605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20355731605886973,0.0,0.1537319879518401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,przyrost,2020/01/30,"Documentary I’m doing a documentary series on trauma related tattoos, gang related, sex trafficking, branding, etc. to help other people in the same situation that I’m in get closure and tell their story.
I will be going to my local prison and jail to see if I can get anyone willing to be on camera but for right now I am curious if anyone here has a trauma related tattoo from or out of prison and would like to share their story with me, it can be anonymous but it doesn’t have to be it will go on my website. 

If you are willing to tell me your story you can send me a message, leave a comment on here, or go to my contact page on my website and leave me an email on there. 
www.przyrost.com/contact.html 

Thanks for reading~",7.756033966033968,6.434742965034968,8.385534465534466,71.32797202797205,63.40559440559441,10.68891108891109,35.11388611388611,9.606745405546679,3.216391408591408,576,21,107,9,7,194,83,143,0.098,0.805,0.09699999999999999,0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,3,2,0,4,5,0,0,6,0,18,1,0,0,0,15,27,11,0,4,7,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,2,0,0,0,1,16,3,22,18,3,16,0,0,1,1,14,11,0,5,2,84,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059837558893578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440227569695741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286306743570316,0.0,0.3730517104136316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14665878270794347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4633607597911462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689590702500038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516901855269221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188618291313429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18685624028511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435735810382688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459433101422099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3824862645575736,0.2014440536282398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543110209861086,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PaleBean,2020/01/30,"Boyfriend has been diagnosed with Depression with Psychosis, please help So my (25F) partner (28M) of 6 years has struggled with mental health since his early teens. He was originally diagnosed with depression, and around 3 years ago we went to see a psychiatrist due to prolonged low mood, lack of emotion and not caring about the consequences to his actions (particularly getting into a lot of debt). The psychiatrist believed my partner to have BPD. 
He mostly struggles with the inability to relax or sit still, and says his mind races 24/7 with varying thoughts and ideas and so he struggles to sleep. He has since been using cannabis in the evening to relax and be able to sleep which seems to have been working well. 
Last week he told me during the past month he had been experiencing a voice in his head. This voice is telling him to harm himself and others, and only presents itself when commuting to work (on public transport). He has self harmed once during this time. He has been to the GP to discuss, and they have now said they believe him to have depression with psychosis. They are working with him to get treatment etc going forward. 

I have no idea what to do or how to help. I’ve scoured the internet looking for anything, but I figured this community with people who may experience something similar, is probably the best place to get advice. Is there anything you would need from a partner, anything at all that could make this process any easier for him? I’m open to any suggestions as it’s my first time dealing with anything on this scale. Thank you in advance.",6.444031141868514,7.929388446366786,5.846884083044987,78.88036072664363,65.9204152249135,8.548166089965397,34.51920415224913,8.841846274778883,2.982527889273357,1267,58,221,20,20,387,175,289,0.08199999999999999,0.84,0.078,0.5478,1,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,1,2,3,6,11,16,0,3,12,0,26,6,3,4,1,45,43,17,0,4,4,0,0,0,3,2,3,4,0,4,12,23,0,0,5,2,1,6,2,9,1,1,11,7,21,6,45,28,6,35,0,4,2,0,38,12,0,6,18,146,33,3,0.09866191642917416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641128286447913,0.08745783599506728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418697286622713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247614027244716,0.08783002316294626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223163878557626,0.1035395943358944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12426122991842645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059239927158156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877351207548876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171610360826604,0.2549320921491761,0.20027953671717288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098137645191776,0.0,0.0,0.11003411691830986,0.06516526529877452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651028600519206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392177571319218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464033764144192,0.0,0.05607184077145602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125559021991164,0.10487300352500403,0.0,0.0,0.13226200575706915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22275458895759026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042263012034766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285116116189535,0.0,0.0,0.08387883316456432,0.0,0.0,0.06585759533881047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942800623020837,0.0,0.09962041024264104,0.0,0.07875100040417858,0.0,0.0,0.0731565608916289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507172102045388,0.0,0.07503683332061327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418396306018978,0.0683997501581813,0.0,0.10308070355001148,0.10830115662178537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637423303235403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385007587567046,0.07845991594384129,0.0,0.0,0.07862077359267036,0.08981810323468513,0.10292589620006837,0.0,0.0,0.16322831362865087,0.0,0.19746633777055972,0.0,0.0,0.07595476345229933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787915339071315,0.0,0.0,0.3094285705514089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623486365909554,0.09083463700146516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832654100175565,0.11506111377593205,0.0,0.0,0.09427568921161787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521221811930231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07914063816442565,0.0,0.08870891168965507,0.09146058498128766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21548115065457665,0.0,0.0,0.07008659468261294,0.0,0.0,0.1270700788447889
mentalhealth,djlefevre,2020/01/30,"I recently accept a job as a mental health nurse where I had previously been an inpatient and they found out. Hey guys. I recently accepted a new position as a mental health nurse at a private inpatient hospital. 

The catch is that I had one admission there last year that lasted for a month. 

I was faced with the dilemma of telling them or not during my interview. Long story short, they found out and are wondering why I didn’t tell them. 

They are still willing to give me the position but want me to reflect on how I will prepare myself for working alongside nurses that have previously looked after me and know some sensitive information about me. 

Any advice on what I should say is appreciated. I’ve basically formed a simulation in my head of me telling them that I would remain professional and not let my experience as a patient in the hospital affect my ability to look after patients under my care. That’s all I’ve come up with though.",7.5801123595505615,7.641971056179781,8.190202247191014,68.04665168539327,63.15730337078652,12.063820224719102,36.33932584269663,11.602472056035307,4.453968988764045,760,33,133,22,10,254,113,178,0.008,0.894,0.098,0.9343,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,6,1,6,3,0,0,13,0,15,4,2,2,1,28,25,11,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,1,6,9,0,0,8,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,7,3,26,3,24,13,3,24,0,0,2,0,15,11,0,3,11,101,32,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14116025597803836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823470280620797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14728202352188674,0.0,0.0,0.1244356339600076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14130521109397964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167760289928467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857489152840205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14303366968028194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14825303232134632,0.30709891172352616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14334980734927236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938897241030378,0.23550104753139794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14771554976772475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783858374388873,0.24261249866637266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29115436272268985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530301273147064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13951603514810862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978867945211254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852647847798142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487682239656763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536235972367448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3787814579376596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192680862444884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520360460645696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303486323631531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15665584238783767,0.1051653343229498,0.0,0.0,0.10261705219640546,0.0,0.0,0.0930246145676408
mentalhealth,crg84,2020/01/30,"My hands don't feel like mine. Recently when I look at my hands type, write or anything that I have to watch them they look odd and don't feel right. Like they are almost numb, but not exactly, when they move I feel like they aren't moving how I want them too. They don't feel like they belong.",1.2092473118279583,3.1482613225806446,1.7625806451612895,100.83053763440859,80.93548387096773,5.423655913978496,15.172043010752688,6.42735559955562,-0.8490408602150539,230,3,56,2,6,70,37,62,0.21600000000000005,0.784,0.0,-0.8392,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,8,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,6,3,2,1,1,13,13,6,0,1,3,0,6,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,0,9,15,4,2,13,0,7,0,0,3,0,9,2,0,2,7,32,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20623921729229575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16948755420656111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4165583144845553,0.4414136557133727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4024866651756136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34590910251528245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4378058303768757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033606805601844,0.0,0.0,0.17588873866334734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214805608222837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iHeartCow,2020/01/30,"So sad I can’t eat. It’s been a while since I’ve last felt like this, and currently going through a rough breakup, so I’ve been pretty down. Whenever I’m feeling like this eating is just feels impossible. A few bites makes me feel nauseated or I just no appetite at all. Any advice to get my appetite back?",2.962380952380953,4.437093492063493,4.308126984126982,86.61742857142859,74.39682539682539,7.5796825396825405,26.885714285714286,8.238735603445708,1.6141009523809529,242,9,52,4,5,80,50,63,0.08900000000000001,0.7509999999999999,0.159,0.5221,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,1,1,10,12,5,0,0,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,5,4,2,4,9,2,7,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,6,29,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583204857239719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976756961816254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20326940329657614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5409936088578595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4009910342083308,0.1888522229938302,0.25381816817215513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13811235208576025,0.0,0.1502366187148441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21548113725537427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582968394609817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17645617308554856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689397405483471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21867366561094104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kr2496,2020/01/30,"I need help but I'm scared, I'm screwing over my work if I do I've been having nightmares about my work, I'm constantly on edge worried something is going to happen, though I have no good reason to be. I've lost almost all joy in my life inside and outside of work. I'm so tired but I'm worried if I seek help I'll be screwing my work over because currently I'm the only one that can do my job, and if I'm deemed unfit until my treatment finishes they'll be high and dry.",5.8173076923076925,3.8085053461538463,7.045076923076923,81.59992307692309,67.65384615384616,9.473846153846154,32.33846153846154,7.554174236665415,2.04776,372,12,83,3,5,128,62,104,0.21600000000000005,0.664,0.121,-0.8744,2,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,5,3,6,2,1,1,0,11,4,0,1,1,12,22,11,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,1,2,0,11,2,9,16,1,10,0,1,0,2,3,5,2,4,4,45,12,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857214218918592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130607953863394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20042718918493346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540687968568664,0.15556344311783687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16401051552115664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486332736006764,0.1959592464272373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840503644155883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310029516269019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20246242298961792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752366082563156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567927740000825,0.14105829865758876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906940581763361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856878334795111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427838733777922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822233411449636,0.0,0.0,0.21317049041776573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5400974989485909,0.376707592037944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Clear-Tank,2020/01/30,"I have a problem with stealing Hi, so this is a throwaway account since this is a topic I am not proud of. I would appreciate you reading to the end and giving your two cents on the thought process behind this.

I'm currently 18, and I've been a habitual thief since I was really young. I think it started when I took a friend's Nintendo DS in third grade or something. I didn't mean to steal it, I was just playing a joke and I was going to give it back when he noticed. But then I forgot that I had it and I only realised I stole it and got away with it when I got home.

From there I started stealing from people (never from shops, I fear the law, I guess). From my friends, my parents, people's houses I visited, etc. I never feel bad, even if the things I take are substantially valuable, whether it be money, electronics, random bits (nice pens, badges, deodorant, video game cartridges, food). I've probably stolen hundreds of dollars over the years.

The thing is - I know this is a bad thing to do, and I know it hurts people, people I'm close to, people who love me and whom I love. If I know I can get away with it then I would take it. Now I don't just take stuff I find - I go looking. When at friend's houses or I'm invited to a family dinner at my uncles place, I'll go looking for stuff I might like in people's rooms or in cabinets or something.

I don't think I'm a kleptomaniac, since I steal for personal gain and don't feel any overwhelming compulsion to do so - I just take what I want, if I can. It has occurred to me that it could be a coping mechanism, since I've been somewhat depressed and it could bring a little bit of material happiness or something. But I'm mainly and hopefully past most of my depression and now I just do it 'cause I can.

Maybe the part of my brain that's supposed to make me feel guilty for these things hasn't properly grown yet, or maybe I'm just a bad person or something. I'm just confused on how I can be good in so many other ways but just steal guilt-free from whoever. I don't exactly want to stop, since I do gain from it and I don't feel bad about it, but I know that it won't end well for me (even though I know my limits and doubt i'm gonna be conning people or robbing banks).

Anyway, sorry for this mess of a post, and it's okay if I get judged in the comments. I no doubt deserve it. I would appreciate any insight into this, though I'm not sure what to expect.

Thank you for reading.",3.6170588235294123,4.132037921568628,4.905882352941177,86.60647058823533,71.74509803921569,8.03921568627451,26.96078431372549,8.124751697461798,1.4778431372549017,1900,61,420,26,34,633,225,510,0.096,0.7809999999999999,0.12300000000000001,0.8671,2,0,4,0,0,0,63.0,0,3,0,4,27,38,0,5,21,1,40,5,1,3,4,89,91,43,0,14,26,1,4,1,3,6,0,0,2,2,41,19,2,3,15,8,6,7,13,20,1,2,12,6,59,18,47,67,7,47,0,4,2,2,20,17,0,21,22,279,100,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461975710030963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307263142519872,0.05349491459082313,0.2323516502060881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519044991530466,0.0,0.0,0.07766295235601509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146739214048803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109171657000687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984080680358328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12323646205985475,0.0,0.07758876434254779,0.09190044968216364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558425594963882,0.07828541437771146,0.1407064108273614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358557567915753,0.0,0.08412412969827436,0.0,0.16124846321537029,0.0,0.07269474263163624,0.1334754643935315,0.11861443418769585,0.05835188316845591,0.1112827167433357,0.0,0.07663902488488243,0.0,0.0,0.07405839098502767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978422440367661,0.06909855108864395,0.0,0.160548515233554,0.07447595527175749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19116883014154695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0339883109360156,0.0697272588363443,0.0,0.0,0.1168422921714213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255789980847876,0.0,0.046438410086059034,0.0705329008743616,0.13978451522314295,0.07578195357845575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380260885927355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731310275832552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920572678972235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052911000156855056,0.0,0.0,0.07724907705818551,0.07533735989361491,0.06641228665605159,0.3376167838959064,0.1214914060705745,0.07268567822417818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662867823233884,0.0,0.0750080568647086,0.0665689436580769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917733817070202,0.0,0.04456822254181248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287744463146081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21423305451961214,0.0,0.0778777429095537,0.09848378518812012,0.0,0.0,0.05816350345961825,0.0,0.0,0.159281650442317,0.0,0.0,0.06556875322904661,0.0,0.20923145393891665,0.0,0.0,0.0640505639689902,0.0,0.0,0.18487644821136287,0.08915509193112818,0.13670403405769582,0.05523068391655225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729465482169584,0.0,0.0,0.06795962722700646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082068191195508,0.055221302765248906,0.0,0.0,0.0625516434078567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14826126016273874,0.0,0.0,0.0448006976317938
mentalhealth,throwaway1232132134,2020/01/30,"Know I need help but can't end up in hospital hi reddit, I know I need help but I am deathly scared of ending up in hospital. I am currently majorly depressed, self medicating with alcohol and suicidal. I know I need help but I cant be honest with any counselling services for fear of ending up in hospital.

Do I have any options to allow me to prevent myself from ending up in hospital. I know these systems have duty of care but I want to be honest as I dont think I'll improve if im not.

In Australia if that changes anything",2.082201834862385,4.0331860733945,4.5747614678899104,81.67792201834864,78.1743119266055,7.662752293577981,29.24862385321101,8.548686976883017,2.4950029357798167,418,20,81,9,10,147,60,109,0.235,0.621,0.145,-0.946,1,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,2,0,0,10,2,0,1,0,23,20,8,2,6,7,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,1,2,5,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,14,3,20,18,1,15,0,1,0,0,5,9,0,3,5,54,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16527312191699334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103337205704693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272632370223079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576753178640865,0.0,0.16359850517934668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319925744705804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812478849376222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5478936824475512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17402351239402072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109745957463081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16704783458463826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399649505178793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579294890392564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3440115975747409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15483097687088668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16133299849004187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691612869003167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909305819606172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912161927045538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pricklypear_bear,2020/01/30,"The people in my head have merged into one being. I’m so scared. For as long as I can remember I’ve had Edwood and Jamie. Physical and verbal beings that I know aren’t technically real. But now they’ve become one. I can’t even remember what they were like before and it’s fucking me over. It means that so many of my memories have been tampered with and everything involving them is fuzzy. 

It’s always been the certain way and now it’s changed I don’t know what to do. I can’t tell who’s saying what so I can’t tell if it’s going to hurt myself or others. I know it’s sounds like that would just be common sense but nothing about this is common or makes any sense. 

I can’t talk to my therapist about it because they’re going to just lock me back up in hospital. I’m so scared and confused and I don’t know how to keep myself or anyone around me safe.",0.8278802776171226,2.917553719780224,2.7985367264314647,92.0596211683054,83.23076923076924,5.809600925390401,18.370156159629843,7.0608816371341465,0.16456703296703346,675,16,148,9,19,226,100,182,0.077,0.87,0.053,-0.7293,1,0,0,0,0,2,12.0,0,0,2,0,14,9,1,3,2,0,21,2,1,2,1,33,33,20,0,2,8,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,16,10,0,2,7,0,0,2,7,5,0,2,4,2,19,4,18,25,0,15,0,1,0,1,8,6,1,5,8,102,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12753733781709414,0.0,0.0,0.10423246787065077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10717366164602156,0.0,0.0,0.13644752350940653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785925344154012,0.0,0.09343520725496887,0.16928053934852355,0.1304260008467214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16214495601126994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012368976876515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775396674854995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170055565838985,0.0,0.0,0.17421978353995682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730468955197718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16408439110174136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623813945760968,0.0,0.0,0.3369444108713906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14976514995109164,0.0,0.0,0.13564382740589218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023124606445098,0.15539710837382048,0.0,0.1669617484468408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707179526520373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20772663576968486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626180184913547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17446086075037567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472620974406373,0.0,0.0,0.12189067974434795,0.306910651859443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319688943730955,0.2679387563094477,0.0,0.0,0.17796445037286346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166280790918348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888238362305903,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kanepedekikedi,2020/01/30,"Is this depression? I know you can't say you're depressed anytime you feel bad but lately i've started to feel like what is happening to me is not only laziness.

I'm a 19 year old girl. Last two years have been exteremely hard. Like, i knew stepping into the adult life would shake me but honestly, what the fuck. Still, i thought i was fine. Somehow i felt like things that happen don't get to me at all when in reality they directly affect me. 

So i have started to feel like i'm lying to myself. I'm literally a mess. I can't function properly. I can't leave the bed, don't take showers, don't cook, and how can i clean a whole house i'm responsible of, when i can't even comb my hair. It's like all my life energy is drained somehow. I can't sleep less than 10 hours even though i sleep early. I'm always anxious. Lately i've been staring at the walls, thinking what would i do, like, if an earthquake started right now. It's my 4th nightmare night in a row. I keep getting short in breath because of random bad thoughts. And i can't even have sex because of this anxiety. I'm 19 but i feel like a hundred years old woman.

Do i need to get help or am i just being lazy? Or maybe is this a phase that will pass eventually?",1.2487937743190685,3.2160652879377447,3.0199782101167294,91.72064435797668,80.9455252918288,5.979704280155642,23.5095719844358,7.087006719466742,0.7657615252918286,957,34,212,12,25,318,140,257,0.138,0.6940000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.8101,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,2,1,0,13,16,1,1,11,0,28,9,4,2,2,32,56,13,0,4,8,0,7,7,0,3,2,1,3,3,11,3,1,1,10,1,0,3,10,7,0,1,7,9,29,9,16,45,4,30,0,2,1,2,8,9,1,6,25,122,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984528931025322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826019030102006,0.12198297070154307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18031211894826185,0.13164322497659953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18600039889587308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21395283570989926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21838511638185396,0.2314157927558992,0.10367459394486164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982274709865624,0.16924015476562462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909669317246676,0.0,0.0967259414123544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723745261596598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063353289298912,0.12459064934586335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597467897764887,0.0,0.0,0.05934118704835348,0.08801544652459872,0.24360490946178395,0.11433176660700516,0.0,0.0,0.15253431549538293,0.36926383361053855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084771384824882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006337722908681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132884669013756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22660682927737075,0.0,0.0,0.0821211688876946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221153756295218,0.0,0.0858674296742811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161094192821696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292794560343961,0.0,0.08623035616737004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118506319384683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173494160909122,0.06918712876310609,0.10608658913270168,0.17144292522342122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10547757571221626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055216312764865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15340714217248674,0.0,0.0,0.20860042215798613
mentalhealth,Rebelpride1,2020/01/30,"I need help asking for help Hey y'all

​

I need some advice

​

I think I need therapy. Like a therapist kind of therapy

​

I recently (I mean.....almost 2 years ago) moved to a small, yet highly touristy city

​

I went to my GP back in July to ask for a referral to someone who can help me with the depression and social anxiety, along with some other issues.

​

I was referred to a psychiatrist. He's given me Lexapro/Escitalopram, which I was taken off of after a month because I had a lot of issues with nausea while I was on it. I've been on Zoloft/Sertraline for a while (2 weeks 25mg, 2 weeks 50mg, 4 weeks 100mg, 4 weeks 200mg). I felt ok, but little change after 4 weeks 200mg Sertraline, besides feeling, as he puts it, ""less sad,"" but had more symptoms of depression compared to before, e.g., less drive to do ""adult"" things, higher propensity to stay in bed, loss of interest in hobbies, including gaming with my closest friends from home. My Psychiatrist said that if my symptoms don't improve, he will change me over to a different kind of antidepressant, since I will have had enough time to adjust to the highest possible Sertraline dosage. No improvement.

​

I also have issues with social anxiety. I want to be able to go out to bars/events in my (tourist) city, but feel too socially inept/shy to go out alone, especially considering the fact that everyone I've met when going out alone, or just out with people I know here, have been tourists. 

​

A bit about me: I grew up in a household that was very Catholic. I was homeschooled from first through 6th grade, with little to no interaction with anyone similar in age to me, besides my older brother, who is a year older than me and autistic. I only had a ""normal"" life when I decided I wasn't going to do ""school"" work anymore (mostly consisting of creationist science (including Galileo's trial concerning the shape of earth) and math, with some Latin (mostly religious). When I started school, I had a lot of trouble making friends because I essentially had to grow up from 2nd grade social skills to middle school social skills in the span of a few weeks/months, and then grow the fuck up to where I was supposed to be. I feel like I'm still behind where i should be, 11 years later, but I can fake it enough to get by. 

​

I'd like to meet with a therapist other than my psychiatrist. Going into my mental health journey, I didn't know that therapists and psychiatrists were (kind of) mutually exclusive. Which is kind of surprising to me, considering my mother is a therapist (though not a good enough therapist to realize that all of her 6 children suffer from anxiety and depression).

​

So, what I'm asking is, should my awkward, anxiety induced self ask for in regards to therapy? I feel shitty saying ""you know, I think you're not doing enough. I'd like an additional opinion.""

​

So what should I say? My next monthly appointment is on Feb. 2.",8.502509549274258,7.583443294117651,8.420007002801121,70.38110294117648,61.69162210338681,11.721950598421188,38.03927934810289,10.914260884657429,4.16714611662847,2372,101,418,52,28,770,269,561,0.107,0.813,0.081,-0.9538,1,2,0,0,0,0,138.0,0,2,0,5,16,24,1,1,24,1,39,5,0,2,2,66,73,23,0,9,9,2,5,4,2,5,4,3,2,3,17,23,0,0,15,1,0,13,7,10,0,1,23,8,53,14,89,42,17,76,0,6,0,1,35,31,1,10,35,273,70,7,0.03815129880569529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037281007646386144,0.033818824473600725,0.0,0.038203014810209227,0.07902647946597684,0.0,0.03050957987122992,0.0,0.4133691631652657,0.4635800391666765,0.0,0.0,0.11674255664664,0.0,0.03783583685544913,0.026676275186823004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266525734621027,0.0,0.0,0.02933599384244564,0.0,0.0465133552887976,0.0,0.03246394530771456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041651337196059575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071803090946299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857897327309877,0.0,0.0,0.039859987161924834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768196060518325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03645520094683411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716177197770878,0.02725529548977866,0.03663122977605845,0.0,0.0,0.03245147527452439,0.0,0.0,0.05895119763778326,0.035270260984026545,0.01993247898918682,0.0,0.10841131154151314,0.03199949936210544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0405530465952926,0.0,0.0,0.07671603418378035,0.040308941839871486,0.03826886336887974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946013180360693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891482730438702,0.06290086824285178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026947390614410482,0.07455518999969593,0.07647524821824883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486973988249223,0.0,0.0,0.025466288202491943,0.0,0.0,0.04155794883589647,0.0,0.0,0.03844753591489671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135600816625236,0.04054879290532617,0.0,0.08486611395321357,0.0,0.0,0.04057433909690529,0.0,0.03738017254185892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029015781905097463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026449306895360916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04300985706544068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03835259275916078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03766980496364194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03629062172373463,0.060678888182595585,0.0,0.11583345357599438,0.0,0.0,0.03980012514344036,0.0,0.0,0.031559148616714786,0.0,0.0,0.19445222313028754,0.032325471672421516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027003685658328436,0.04066420833504172,0.030467676508269988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930761466105961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088800530891795,0.221482992122554,0.025346027691724504,0.04889162358552344,0.037483457371871434,0.0,0.022246329138218772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031478817041935066,0.022502624501666943,0.0,0.15301335325529966,0.0,0.0,0.03536663621438637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027774599910321943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4635800391666765,0.0737045567742077
mentalhealth,yeah_tea,2020/01/30,"Hi guys! I am a post graduate student of Clinical Psychology, trying to study the prevalence of Non-Suicidal Self-Injury among the global youth. If you could kindly spare 15 minutes and help fill this survey I would greatly appreciate it! [Link](https://forms.gle/Wey3Pw8ifKSag4eF9)

This is for individuals between 18-27.

Non - Suicidal Self-Injury (NSSI) is an issue that attracts considerable attention in clinical settings today. NSSI refers to intentional and self-inflicted damage of one’s body tissue without an actual suicidal intent or purposes that are socially sanctioned (Washburn, Potthoff, Juzwin, & Styler, 2014). The purpose of this study is to understand the nature of the same in the context of the global youth. 

\*The information that I collect from this research project will be kept strictly confidential. Unfortunately there are no monetary incentives for participation in the study :(. Kindly be honest. \* 

While this is an important area of clinical research, certain items may unintentionally act as a triggering stimulus for some participants. Please feel free to contact me if you need some help or clarification regarding the same. 

This questionnaire may require about 15 minutes of your time. Kindly fill it sincerely;  your contribution would make a substantial difference in the field of mental health!",9.30370954123276,12.48596002392345,8.683174781874474,54.70575288488604,61.20095693779904,12.190374331550805,40.52378271882915,11.67016984619884,6.279236757669576,1091,59,133,38,17,345,136,209,0.052000000000000005,0.7559999999999999,0.192,0.9832,0,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,4,0,1,2,10,0,0,17,0,15,5,1,4,1,31,20,8,2,6,5,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,11,2,0,2,7,0,1,3,2,1,0,1,1,1,8,10,26,11,5,18,0,1,0,0,11,8,0,8,5,92,19,6,0.0,0.0,0.13373893466016398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849129093748495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15222926891274355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942155854463577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318583672530566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929551205669494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109574121459976,0.0,0.1356989206183893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567545857249786,0.0,0.0,0.1837205733865117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430423518713844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4281427466948279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148050574498738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13811200133198642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161924610973894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286717168763194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504373873591687,0.0,0.0,0.1312539591798858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4289123975844392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970302679175034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4497243206408417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991370490869426,0.0,0.12990533959547318,0.0,0.0,0.0930464957975405,0.0,0.0,0.14267164771587187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210923925640836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19470972465740746,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DepressedSuccess,2020/01/30,Can’t take this I keep waking up after a couple hours of sleep with a racing mind. It’s been happening more frequently lately and I don’t know what to do. Feels like my mind is going to snap sometimes.,0.012857142857143344,2.3718740952380983,2.030476190476193,92.97285714285721,93.76190476190477,4.704761904761905,14.142857142857142,6.42735559955562,-0.4260285714285712,160,3,33,2,6,53,36,42,0.0,0.932,0.068,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,5,2,2,0,0,7,11,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,6,10,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034999119219701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869074790776784,0.1959549252972901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588699423541616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425563337405763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701232857374437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438041607990106,0.0,0.0,0.15074422194743928,0.0,0.3094143744501646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400567141525355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5539153380222128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744910228932427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712827232203732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20623414855078634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lamaestrariendo,2020/01/30,"Is there a term for feeling exhausted after interacting with people? I was reading a post on another forum and OP was stating that OP felt exhausted after interacting with other people and it felt like wearing different masks to get through social situations effectively, never being able to be truly authentic self with others.

I have felt that my whole life. I am a natural extrovert, but my introvert friend said it's part of being an introvert.

I feel like it is perhaps more complex than that. I too wear a variety of social masks to fit in and get through situations with others. I always feel alone and isolated and never allow others to get close to me.

I don't know what this would be called by mental health professionals, if there is a term for it.",5.996595744680853,7.5384606099290785,7.148716312056737,68.92350000000002,67.01418439716312,10.462695035460994,31.83049645390071,10.577609850970193,3.819186666666667,610,25,99,17,10,206,86,141,0.076,0.789,0.135,0.8177,1,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,6,0,13,6,2,2,2,25,24,7,0,2,2,0,6,2,1,1,4,1,0,1,13,10,0,0,9,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,7,10,3,21,13,5,12,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,8,78,23,2,0.15005998480144445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541688853074978,0.0,0.0,0.1248619284095492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573509780354182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322802219438056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567807454778263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276245113409936,0.1072028831255546,0.4322433538723693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159359720177092,0.0,0.2352004456838549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950674672269452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246904323923865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059918050662372,0.14662345750275022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122517019475934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314710223669937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250034030119673,0.0,0.20806539829433549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14371598502871932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010059316447208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274140893692547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654529101454012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3373474203674441,0.0,0.3059345140111672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16753661407980985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659830777164976,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vickytrxff,2020/01/30,"I keep skipping school. I feel so trapped. Everyday I wake up with an unsettling feeling in my stomach, it's such a challenge for me to get out of bed and get to school. 

Every lunch time I just sit in the bathroom stall, each day feels so painfully long. I hate it. Most of my friends have betrayed me, so I don't enjoy hanging out with anyone at school.

I don't want to talk to my school counseller about my problems, I have a fear of being judged by someone who doesn't know me, and I feel like my reasoning for skipping school is so invalid. My mum is so angry and thinks I'm playing a game with her.

What should I do?",3.4082945736434103,4.195803472868222,4.086821705426356,91.29131782945738,72.4108527131783,6.663565891472868,29.06201550387597,6.42735559955562,1.169517829457365,484,19,107,3,9,154,80,129,0.235,0.69,0.075,-0.9759,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,8,9,1,1,5,0,10,4,2,1,0,23,22,8,0,3,1,1,4,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,4,9,1,1,7,2,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,4,20,5,20,20,2,12,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,5,71,24,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609764077994928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785744531651394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784448766938644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17074567039874866,0.30688999524488303,0.10840053680561453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723119038768265,0.0,0.1585520452790388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498083117720826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487031196567015,0.0,0.0,0.08339037436622725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413075580709158,0.0,0.0,0.13428196679199694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145826106719122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451912722565976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15601032299516465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7678268462480958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856578579745326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195999576741165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722657829845134,0.0,0.0,0.08847873329576156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949807850847409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Diesel_King97,2020/01/30,Was my love not enough for you? i have been fighting for you for so long but you have never fought for me once.... i keep fighting... and for what? you say you love me if you do then show me!... show me this love you speak of! where is it?! i want you to fight for me to fight for us like iv been doing for 6 years.... but you will never get this message cause i dont know how to tell you and i dont wanna lose you so ill keep dealing with the pain for all the temporary pleasure and good memories we make i will always love you... i just hope you give me another chance before its to late....,-0.3702380952380935,1.5845299126984145,1.3120634920634942,101.68571428571433,87.17460317460319,4.552380952380953,15.349206349206348,5.773587663045528,-0.9926603174603176,443,8,112,3,14,143,72,126,0.105,0.608,0.287,0.9856,0,0,0,0,6,0,27.0,2,13,0,1,5,15,5,0,2,0,12,7,0,3,3,22,25,10,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,5,5,0,2,1,2,0,0,5,7,0,0,4,2,29,8,16,19,2,7,0,1,0,4,30,1,0,2,7,81,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271606834234929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16024786865944768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004081540142684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569909538643892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575534370914119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3582140047263745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579066448704324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984352475204869,0.14660140691464818,0.0,0.1281803844247105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15178736933242412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716715781949274,0.0,0.0,0.08398732930974949,0.0,0.17239060061072914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466142522166618,0.0,0.0,0.1352432322199507,0.0,0.17096944979651915,0.0,0.0,0.551713616635417,0.0,0.10201030255903076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357324908548384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627511298666886,0.0,0.0,0.16261406961043234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215307015540348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13357372809840568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838268259813403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013875581454713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841277321522483
mentalhealth,Dillxxx7,2020/01/30,"I am afraid to go get help. So basically I know my head is fucked up, for example; right now I’m crying and was trying to pull hair out of my head and screaming at myself minutes ago solely because I am so upset and lonely and the fact that I can’t even find a decent hookup is making me so fucking emotional, plus I saw a pic of my friend who is in a successful relationship and instead of being happy for her I just broke down and started to shit talk my fucking self!!! but for some reason I am so so so afraid and hesitant to go seeing professional help! I acknowledge and know I need it but I still can get myself to make an appointment with a therapist or anything like that. Has anyone else had this experience and been able to get through it and get help? 

Like I am an advocate for other people to get help and I help others seek the help that fits their needs but I can’t even noon an appointment to start getting help for myself.
Does anyone have any suggestions for me? 
Thx, I am in Seattle, wa I’d you know of help near me. Or I’ll take advice from anyone who has gone through this before.",3.729516666666669,4.726104826666667,5.050819444444446,83.89756250000002,71.84444444444446,8.113888888888889,25.618055555555557,8.472884824447931,1.5775388888888888,866,26,179,14,16,289,125,225,0.073,0.736,0.191,0.9844,0,2,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,1,12,15,4,3,9,0,18,7,4,3,1,32,43,23,0,2,6,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,11,14,0,0,6,0,0,4,2,10,0,0,5,4,27,5,30,37,1,19,0,2,2,3,18,9,4,3,8,124,38,2,0.10487486327078543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10248250261215708,0.09296523850239416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131850333643454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199928285828844,0.10745669095887474,0.08630307655438507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393074323658288,0.0,0.08924078424477043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520011275876432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177669958749632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760949101421496,0.11797010540894745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853771618392316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258774018731713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585372506115357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102605920966229,0.29086536348842584,0.3287567250517894,0.0,0.11920560327791972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164124209190948,0.0,0.0,0.215263732229224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5623632814653435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729094464170116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024731215202864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14000957119981775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15552676450144018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270702521519216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078288263261798,0.0,0.11259635483089675,0.0,0.08956256020673325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357168783249529,0.0,0.1094073547492268,0.0,0.10765254005517996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846193602204166,0.0,0.08375320128043287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885284534185749,0.08429444250784254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176779948676232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07120314799403653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dr-Anxious,2020/01/30,"Would you be interested in reading a study posted on this subreddit of how vitamins and supplements directly effect General Anxiety Disorder? I’m working on a research “paper” - more of an outline - on how multivitamins / supplements react towards someone with generalized anxiety disorder, who currently takes medication for it, to see how it effects their health overall (specifically mental healthy and energy). 

Just out of curiosity, how many of you would be interested in reading something like that if it was posted on this subreddit?",17.001007751937987,13.250040186046515,16.171395348837212,30.18019379844964,48.30232558139535,20.76899224806202,63.55038759689922,17.879347455551382,11.041322480620156,440,30,50,20,3,150,61,86,0.09300000000000001,0.7909999999999999,0.11599999999999999,0.4871,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,1,3,5,3,0,0,3,0,5,3,0,7,0,17,8,7,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,3,15,3,1,11,0,0,1,0,4,8,0,1,2,42,10,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075260825330052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.460722607119446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21365164362429945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09819754754261786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203780585036063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024844988340668,0.20255886872074094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3850013500664344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.402105103357474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16016950918243752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17030508762183308,0.1547382024660859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112560082977167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632905342644298,0.0,0.0,0.28556665007501536,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Newo2003,2020/01/30,"Talking to myself in the mirror for like 10-60minutes. This is really starting to get on my nerves, ive done this for years but now its a lot worse. I actively will seek out reflective objects/mirrors and talk to myself under my breath, pretending to be other people or just other parts of my head. I mean, i heard people do this when theyre preparing for a job interview, but ive done it most of my teenage life. A lot of times its me strawmanning other people and making stuff up that theyve said about so i feel like im attacked and i can argue back to them and yell at them. Its just worse now because everytime i go to take a shower and im in a rush i just start talking to myself and lose track of time.",3.0552457002456985,4.1687688243243235,4.487002457002458,86.85701474201475,73.5945945945946,7.543980343980343,24.265356265356267,8.00094639256281,1.2155459459459466,558,16,118,8,11,186,90,148,0.136,0.799,0.065,-0.9118,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,1,9,5,2,0,6,0,9,3,2,1,0,20,19,11,0,0,6,0,1,2,0,1,1,3,1,0,12,7,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,4,4,19,2,22,13,4,18,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,4,11,87,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116024981992894,0.0,0.11568788199992405,0.0,0.09171381046387557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3079281479733639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607277615516121,0.10748254943837664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860467552766474,0.0,0.0855050289717814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15440659796772266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250267777710583,0.0,0.14929985394263395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626831197023072,0.14700596253001694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16831669403540364,0.0,0.2558168935130201,0.0,0.0,0.10042751441688796,0.0,0.0,0.16388574073566367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16292426426368134,0.0,0.31291228565739304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963830545352072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14311378664133534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21298062828767653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722309206591854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113120770166209,0.3627815413335503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17545890649526885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066457719301108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688580420745913
mentalhealth,endableism,2020/01/30,"You know you're in deep when you have to buy bath wipes and rinse free shampoo I legit just don't have the energy most days to take a bath or shower. But, ya know, eventually you get kind of gross. Hence the solution. But yeah, this is pretty far down. I'm considering doing similar things for toothbrushing. I feel like I'm admitting how bad things are, which is something at least.",2.285899999999998,4.797817506666668,3.327583333333333,87.90337500000004,80.6,7.483333333333332,20.041666666666664,8.472884824447931,1.1787666666666667,303,8,62,7,8,97,60,75,0.106,0.73,0.16399999999999998,0.5849,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,4,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,1,7,0,0,1,0,11,15,6,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,4,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,6,4,7,15,2,7,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,2,3,36,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28402976607995145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21938307252975411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17200139924892965,0.2430192485750209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17772605209898276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3542372337645766,0.3738997372902418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619106420886906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3460776506832838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618813522857629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25576732881444153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.451990887885588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sissytrapboy,2020/01/30,"Could I have more than OCD? Currently I am being treated for severe ocd and depression and am in between prozac and Zoloft and I feel like I had a mental break during uni today.  
It’s happened to me in the past during my teenage years as well, but do to medical and abuse history I have memory loss from my childhood and push out traumatic events. 
It felt as if my mind is screaming, as if There was a million radio stations blasting in my head at once. I was still me, and I was able to realize something was wrong, but I couldent stop it, in the same way that when a song gets stuck in my head and I can’t stop that either.
It lasted for about 5 mins and it has lasted anywhere from 2-20 mins in the past.  
It was very auditory but I also understood That it was not coming from my ears even though I was able to “hear” it, it also seems to be episodic, asside from my other issues I feel as if I’m very grounded in reality asside from these episodes.   
Is it worth bringing up with my psychiatrist? My mother and sister have severe mental health issues, I’m a 22 year old male and am worried I could be showing early signs of schizophrenia.",4.544231884057972,5.1243159739130455,5.473478260869566,83.1307971014493,69.69565217391305,8.046376811594204,27.94202898550725,8.021203637495839,1.6903855072463765,894,29,180,11,15,294,130,230,0.16899999999999998,0.807,0.024,-0.9887,1,0,1,0,1,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,0,0,7,0,24,7,3,0,0,35,37,25,0,5,8,2,3,1,0,0,4,4,0,1,15,14,0,2,6,3,1,3,2,4,1,1,11,7,24,3,31,21,3,34,0,2,0,0,4,11,0,4,19,131,39,0,0.2547053491724816,0.15089209452123736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036877757107255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970305257958923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033614957513349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968867200942713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411524047253244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287866775810514,0.09098077617067804,0.12227853916909835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653651618350792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126175495479461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26140117074598146,0.13536993780562953,0.14353571996915596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658462100088552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20761885464567545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221808397076925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829442146474646,0.2566830846283904,0.0,0.1285898971655022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363520895251838,0.13562644209267916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431450762961279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11593709191136155,0.0,0.2877445455696599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980423107852309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170401043272813,0.21294507685876107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512335617613515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071544455037204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21015858796937795,0.0,0.1010866253074916,0.0,0.0,0.11450534889439487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293328228882621,0.0,0.0,0.13924015750226754,0.0,0.16402189402417855
mentalhealth,alt_isj,2020/01/30,"I feel like a ghost For the past week, any time I'm touching something or somebody, I feel like I'm passing through it. When I hug people it's surreal, it feels like my body is passing through them. I'm thinking it might be depersonalization, but I only feel disconnected physically, not from my memories or emotions. Any ideas for what this is? For context I've been dealing with a difficult situation where I constantly feel like I'm a shitty person for things I did.",4.675904761904762,6.4626739555555535,5.813174603174605,76.285,70.55555555555556,8.6984126984127,33.96825396825397,9.23628265651192,3.2258253968253983,376,19,69,8,7,125,57,90,0.11199999999999999,0.767,0.121,-0.3071,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,0,4,0,6,2,1,0,0,13,16,4,1,0,4,0,6,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,0,7,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,6,9,5,8,12,0,8,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,3,9,40,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340083717355439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911157649333576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18593173904927915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738249307094206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19354018234223927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4349841816804294,0.4916682279823076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942306229329417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33623207431177665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18252454728545608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085657132345613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16424720946114085,0.11928217635247453,0.15023292695783025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933984930612912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324573476946243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430656224452004,0.11024673141264996,0.0,0.0,0.10032741371856638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801318771406754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wholelottafeelings,2020/01/30,"Help feeling? I’m dealing with some suppressed feelings, and I need to be able to get them out so I can know what they are. Any advice?",-0.2674999999999983,2.021882964285716,1.047142857142859,100.0228571428572,94.35714285714286,2.8000000000000003,21.285714285714285,3.1291,-0.5378142857142851,105,4,23,0,4,33,25,28,0.0,0.835,0.165,0.5514,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,9,9,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,4,8,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,15,5,0,0.4056558764017947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3964022275351516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27585990648595005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182133962804912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4102235994081047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21193845259107894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719025830932372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22293786085275435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007886923049847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dumbassest,2020/01/30,"I want to understand whats wrong (advice? or is this just a vent) 16 year old guy, yadda yadda edgy teenager who magnifies every little thing because hormones.

Right. Not exactly sure how to format stuff here so feel free to kick my ass if I do something dumb.

this may jump around a lot because my line of thinking is wacked to hell and i just want to explain but its so difficult.

I feel things just so intensely. I think my neutral is just kind of empty? I'm not sure how best to put it but I'll do stupid shit like avoid people when I can and complain the next moment about being lonely and craving closeness with somebody. I can't hold a romantic relationship to save my life, every time I start feeling things toward a significant other it's like a switch is flipped and there's just nothing there, and I want to get away from them and be done with that person for good. And then a week later I run back to them. I feel so manipulative in doing that, but the feelings come and go in waves that are stupidly intense, and it drives me crazy. I don't have a solid sense of self image, which translates over into the relationship thing I guess? I can't decide on who or what I am anymore because I just adapt my personality to whoever I'm talking to in the moment, like if you spoke to two of my friends they may describe me as completely different from the other. its mostly the emotions thing, though. like they go so beyond any kind of intensity i can describe, and its been worse than usual lately which im assuming is due to stress. but when i get all happy and excited my heart starts racing and any attempts to just calm the fuck down dont work. ill get super mad for just no reason at all, and assume that any social cue is directed at me even if i know that logically its not.

I just feel like something is so wrong, and I refuse to believe the stupid bullshit ""ah youre just a hormonal angsty teen! thats normal!"" because its been this way for as long as i can remember. the only things i feel solid about are my identity as transgender (i rarely think about or acknowledge it, but who knows maybe its relevant. only reason i bring it up) and my want to be an archaeologist, which i think ive obsessed about so much just because it is literally my only constant. i just want to know whats wrong with me. going to my parents isnt a good option because they have a tendency to use the previously mentioned argument and deem my emotions and questions about my mental health as ""overreactions"" and ""youre just depressed/anxious"" when im so certain thats just not it.",4.497951320672343,5.649086487229866,5.387035036018339,81.62312404496836,70.17878192534381,8.091704867932767,28.480735647238607,8.430304187100639,1.9835998253656408,2038,73,396,31,36,667,247,509,0.182,0.696,0.122,-0.9902,2,3,2,0,0,0,48.0,0,3,5,4,40,37,8,3,21,1,33,7,3,6,6,105,70,49,0,9,29,1,7,5,1,2,3,1,0,4,41,25,0,3,25,0,1,9,10,17,1,1,4,8,53,21,57,61,6,47,1,1,0,2,27,17,5,15,25,279,94,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202183551958809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15036194626039198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309369007930441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06561140246225168,0.0,0.0,0.06924650707476149,0.056673149593076434,0.0,0.2695724259265301,0.0,0.0,0.08303817688000012,0.07734687695740734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348871146307396,0.07727631869835055,0.07964688883473962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700407313071446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542388058424686,0.08637950732415506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658121788876726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04868021542183861,0.0,0.12419611419863412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608655828017865,0.052653523408530835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05694284741741312,0.06813734648534221,0.11552051410788652,0.0,0.12566154416798686,0.12363735989255782,0.0,0.0,0.0811922956638114,0.07297767604699633,0.0,0.07845834137731326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834296968063513,0.0,0.08733855165855565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592240334937318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350091475933814,0.12151592117883896,0.0,0.08314032925342843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05205869307294048,0.18003810687672778,0.07386988839917122,0.0,0.06522494159327599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265975668267923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404469006663159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427540945408345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054180273336494084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783841038973788,0.0,0.07221340860845951,0.07072013109366497,0.0,0.07733902587932713,0.0,0.0,0.1681636310635297,0.0,0.0,0.0818385922013727,0.0,0.0,0.05109646308096626,0.12870944244281518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409199219210967,0.08256436176559152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515581644863754,0.0,0.15825913577512574,0.08349126700526957,0.06294206147886708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688842785390075,0.0,0.07565519318417084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513104883615115,0.0,0.11348052463901373,0.0,0.0,0.10433489488019863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442667454862689,0.0,0.08437243868876174,0.0,0.0,0.13892863606959518,0.0,0.0,0.05923977575460795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937904664170621,0.18890393229505528,0.07241294085043609,0.0,0.04297688177596039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199723842136121,0.07672754684158567,0.0,0.063655831302176,0.081173573602315,0.0,0.2173600477742466,0.058502105784768985,0.0591201968840672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05365674890918569,0.0,0.07510977556271181,0.0,0.2417483737014769,0.0,0.04746239260650005
mentalhealth,horror_lover_girl,2020/01/30,"I'm a 13f and I don't know what's wrong with me mentally. I show signs of a lot of mental things, bipolar, depression, anxiety, OCD, ect. I'm scaref of myself. I fantasize about killing everyone I hate, then myself. When I go into an episode it's normally 30-60 minutes of me crying, hyperventilating, being depressed and I get visions of cutting myself.

I'm receiving counseling once a week in school but I haven't lately. Aside from anxiety my mom thinks I'm fine. I know no one understands how I feel. I just lost some of my online friends, the only people that new everything wrong with me. I have cut before. I have really bad anger issues and I take my anger out on myself to avoid hurting others/things around me. I told my mom i wanted a punching bag but she said it wouldn't to anything.

I feel pressured to live, but i don't want to die. I just want to sit in a dark room with music and my favorite foods/drinks. I have been doing minor things (scratching, biting my lip, digging my nails into my skin) I didn't know were self harm till now. Does anyone know what's wrong with me? Am I permanently stuck like this? Should I be scared for the people around me..?",1.687435897435897,4.0550144444444465,3.2390324786324816,88.51152307692308,81.90598290598291,6.137162393162392,21.325811965811965,7.404127859558343,0.8143937094017093,916,28,185,14,25,301,140,234,0.253,0.638,0.11,-0.9862,0,1,1,0,0,2,37.0,0,0,0,1,8,21,6,3,8,0,15,3,2,1,0,37,38,11,2,6,5,2,4,1,1,2,1,1,1,1,8,13,0,1,8,1,0,2,6,18,0,1,7,5,41,3,27,27,2,19,0,4,0,0,8,9,0,2,8,116,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806626744692801,0.0,0.0,0.08256470234273644,0.0,0.09717027422496954,0.210233540422772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098592370336774,0.0,0.0,0.10047789514955688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12970599652333914,0.0,0.0,0.2034052987419167,0.0,0.12254902222492993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333313043318784,0.0,0.0,0.1156740360842555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283107532594265,0.10612323108536288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941020046765302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122878009812338,0.0,0.06169224088331403,0.0,0.0671079272149067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658014805044913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264077265098027,0.0,0.0,0.12324547005549062,0.0,0.0,0.1306386908795967,0.0,0.2595760428670373,0.0,0.1332000621455956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05768821759523314,0.0,0.10426733479378936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12889892563232672,0.10038790511304838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23799494767493964,0.0,0.0,0.27658914758157666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404298109904823,0.0,0.0,0.11569391895324313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12575198726443562,0.08001447178145714,0.08980561864272184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16372444321356064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564545718864882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232169257022273,0.0,0.11821928180584272,0.11950387312140265,0.0,0.0,0.12318382017947566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878191729884616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689501006285098,0.07566128179667737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283107532594265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292607088943985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20894099504884067,0.0,0.09471713631315537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873078046453074,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwawayshelly,2020/01/30,"Fighting sadness Hey everyone, this is a throwaway because I don’t want some of my friends to find out my real problems from a reddit post. I’ve been struggling with sadness and finding out who I really am. I have some amazing friends who have helped me through a lot of my problems. One I’m particular, we will call her girl. I’ve told girl about so many issues in my life and I have really opened up to her about everything I feel. I always ask if she’s comfortable and okay with everything I’m telling her. She always helps me and makes me feel happy again. Whenever I’m with her I’m never sad and I’m always happy. However, whenever I’m with her friends I feel deep sadness and I often just get lost in my feelings. Her family has taken me in and made me feel loved. I have a couple questions however. I’m very kind and caring of this girl because I genuinely love her as my friend. I think I’m being a little to loving though because she just makes me so happy whenever I’m with her. How do I tell her that the reason I might be a little to kind to her is because I’m deeply sad? I don’t want it to seem like I’m only happy because she cares for me because that might arise some issues. Also, I’m going to see counseling in a couple of days and was wondering if that doesn’t work what are my other options for my sadness? Thank you everyone! Every comment will matter to me :)",1.8779883040935663,3.904672775438602,3.8045614035087763,86.58637426900587,79.14035087719299,6.6081871345029235,24.5906432748538,7.662118739084242,1.3517134502923969,1091,40,219,17,27,369,133,285,0.077,0.665,0.258,0.9952,2,0,0,0,2,0,23.0,1,1,0,2,11,31,1,1,8,1,21,4,0,5,1,53,59,17,0,6,4,0,5,1,4,4,1,0,0,3,10,18,0,0,12,0,0,1,4,11,0,1,6,6,46,20,31,47,4,16,0,7,1,3,39,11,0,13,4,142,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688736594218986,0.21498722477337467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051469724650374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31500384511206997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794265171855109,0.0,0.17561915141710796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905900427198576,0.0,0.05554311944306396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256352979367774,0.16459112873833956,0.1548061324350725,0.0,0.08119042870769398,0.0,0.21773544678479528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743230061130994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661580215626904,0.0,0.044996449480117384,0.0,0.04894648684187549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3667241429463546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545475296334455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797830160682372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17937063930488933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060832217661440924,0.0420760363289706,0.17263856867972324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401496707222264,0.07321989339595934,0.23319192716806444,0.08149299897840036,0.11497742465161245,0.08731663380284542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182728777395352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642445425920279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05836012901529095,0.06550149458715604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248337762746819,0.0,0.0,0.16481885769559765,0.0,0.0,0.09647904950216836,0.0,0.0,0.09802843341476296,0.11034700455207624,0.08855023730125014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863000406633138,0.07840442809890244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003593276422169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15055306054976308,0.0792917853883273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05518504426520085,0.08461679537645682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229556436916978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710616577842471,0.10159681664368997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09339824863485764,0.0626995960900426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dankmemes,2020/01/30,"Have been suffering my whole life, and I have no way of expressing it properly I've typed out huge novels three times now just to realize it is impossible to explain so just give.me the benefit of the doubt here please but at the age of 29 I have finally for the first time gone to a psych to try and figure out what's wrong with me and give it a name and a plan to start working on it.

Long story short, it was the most demeaning and humiliating thing I could've ever imagined especially with how hopeless it already feels and just thought if anyone could decipher my insanity it would be one of thse people, and I realize everyone's different but I just can't see myself ever putting myself through that again.

I've been massively depressed before, suicidal, the works, I am intimate with depression but I know enough about this beast eating away at my sanity daily that I know the depression only happens as a byproduct of my behaviors in my worst states of mind. 

The guy wasn't being mean or anything but you could tell from the way the receptionist treated me to the psych 101 or psych Wikipedia entries where just being mentally read to me like a bullet list and taking 0 context from anything I was saying, and kept trying g to tell me that you do t always k ow you have depression etc, like I get that whole concept but that's not what's happening here. 


It's to the point that I know I'll never have the guts to take the easy way out so I can only see a painful slow tortures death in the midst of insanity out on the street somewhere once the few people in my life who are there for me when I cycle back to the manic crazy part of myself get fed up and enough is enough. And I can't ever explain how bad and what exactly is happening in side my head because I can't differenciate between when I get manic and hysterical and fixate o  something, to my coping mechanisms that allow me to lie to myself so I don't feel bad, or if I'm being clear headed.

I'm still not even making an attempt to describe the torture I put self through that will take my.mind to the craziest places and makes me feel like I'm justified in whatever insanity I happen to be getting g myself into at the time, because I just cant, but I Atleast have convinced myself that under all the Bullshit and insanity I can really do awesome things and am capable of not just having a normal life, but even even a potentially fruitful one. Wether that's a delusion or not, really is making everything so much worse as my.mental state declines and the path to homeless crazy person is seeming.more and more likely to be the case, I just want a shot at life and feel like this expierence was so bad for me, as seemingly.small as it might seem to to someone else, that I really want to give in and let nature do its thing, because if it wasn't for my mom there's no way I would've been able to make it this far. She's the one who finally.conviced me to go and now I feel like it was the nail in my coffin. What do I do? I know the obvious answer is to just try another person but try to understand just how let down it was and not only was it just a let down in terms of I didn't get any validation for this thing that's taking over slowly and is going to kill me eventually ( not.like drugs or anything but I just get fixated on these massive life changing things and put myself into insane situations that because compulsive once I convince myself it's the only thing holding me back from a normal life or whatever. I just know that if it isn't already to late, that that time is coming and if anyone e has any tips or ideas to maybe be able to digest the idea that there are people who eill give me the time of day,bored just literally anything that you think will help please do.


I feel like because I've used so much of.my brainpower into emulating normal behaviors in social situations  that because I'm not scram g b out loud about crazy shit like some of the people in the waiting room where, doesn't mean that I'm just overreacting or looking for drugs or whatever the hell else they assumed about me. I know I'm probably a lot less intelligent then I think, but I know that he was trying to get me to accept I was depressed when I wasn't because either he didn't have the patience to be empathetic or he just dismissed me because I'm not the average crazy person on the outside. But I don't even think I can handle another bad expierence like that and at this point there are no other options besides getting  help from someone much smarter then me and trusting that they have ever patients best interest at heart. He doesn't know how horrifying that was for me but to me, the fact the he could just so effortlessly shatter any hope for a way out of this without concise g anything I said long enough to even let me finish a thought, is so scary.",9.183248233416913,6.495547690550366,9.205550236810783,70.89768178709826,61.71028037383178,12.42731302079376,38.441075906086155,10.751898458667489,3.9116936858901297,3858,144,750,73,41,1276,362,963,0.159,0.7390000000000001,0.102,-0.9974,2,1,3,0,0,2,49.0,0,4,2,6,58,38,5,1,54,0,78,18,5,10,10,169,149,76,4,15,53,1,6,9,0,4,10,3,1,5,62,41,4,3,34,2,0,7,26,20,0,5,23,13,85,18,109,107,22,91,1,7,3,0,35,46,2,24,40,537,147,7,0.08763849931505431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671126326350106,0.0,0.036461126001964335,0.0,0.0,0.08939577717964838,0.09189660787335614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061278876417690586,0.0,0.1802975441305172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04116962749473914,0.06738859637155556,0.14634897253101686,0.2136944630052616,0.0,0.037286954018317504,0.0,0.04598559908270797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04635495591250674,0.037746403558431514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994442098695667,0.0,0.0,0.028259790953027632,0.0,0.18870727760526315,0.0,0.0,0.04578178944024498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163283582339276,0.04483803188731992,0.07321072065111672,0.0,0.0,0.18110799408001868,0.04887004646367491,0.14471100564805306,0.158548080058483,0.0,0.04187117088045705,0.03938191611065669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293797548788786,0.12521792284334993,0.0,0.048001846131819036,0.0,0.03727263137361854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18314999498579695,0.16814166849917064,0.04980697879075463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04338794641356912,0.15499687102742776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994238400491024,0.0,0.0,0.05192602182563087,0.05874223875060016,0.0,0.0,0.04352240212727376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893319833189654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04847950738408952,0.0,0.1926553091151754,0.0,0.04943002224586071,0.0,0.0,0.17923260647926936,0.18570499153368009,0.1926708478818562,0.0,0.0,0.07755731407108057,0.036797133552289134,0.0,0.0,0.037253559067633016,0.0,0.0,0.11699875763379752,0.0,0.04402232598844963,0.09546401786054212,0.0,0.0,0.04415949725727554,0.04648529918803305,0.08848990138036189,0.05132057559769336,0.0,0.0,0.09663657121730533,0.0,0.03379610670693843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288006828702229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333214155933156,0.08907917285710516,0.1333060557422512,0.04662677112242365,0.0,0.0,0.0474519772243954,0.0,0.1215150014178137,0.11478383584110592,0.04578178944024498,0.09620075490051347,0.0828467091190815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047244562472277034,0.0,0.0,0.13215134659134498,0.0,0.0,0.0438311077688021,0.0,0.0842152001598789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041682140931511735,0.034846826103563815,0.0,0.0,0.06983653735934181,0.03989139915229152,0.045713034016050015,0.0,0.0449798300739138,0.0,0.09850934513930128,0.0,0.04466820673761835,0.07425581607196585,0.033734199201208265,0.0,0.0,0.031015490444037962,0.0,0.034994109380133503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047931146973322236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178648947821806,0.0,0.07659991122457771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746693743099211,0.08423281751037298,0.0,0.06957517914078484,0.12775678430187634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875197073185056,0.0,0.0,0.04561738426232542,0.0,0.037845762527041776,0.0,0.0,0.05169145753124045,0.17390840379980702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784525473401623,0.0,0.04224019297628562,0.0,0.06380187127084877,0.0,0.04465555898425014,0.062255875442030234,0.04790947063945258,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shattered_Minds,2020/01/30,"Would you be willing to share your story? Hi everyone!

Hearing everyone's stories on Reddit has inspired me to want to help others. I've dealt with a lot of past depression/anxiety/homicidal thoughts myself, and this has all driven me to want to change the world. My goal is to help impact 1 billion lives. With this, I've created the opportunity for people to write me their stores of what may have impacted your life to cause mental illness of any sort. I'm hoping to capture as many stories and tell the world so we can help others through their toughest moments in their lives.

Would anyone be interested in sharing their story to me? This story will be told to the world on my channel I created which I hope can help others achieve the help they need to get through these similar scenarios. I would love to hear your story and maybe one day you can save the life of another. We can all help one each other and help put an end to the stigma of remaining silent about our problems.

Thank you for anyone who takes the time to read and reply to this.",6.494786535303781,6.751647374384238,6.4695689655172455,78.80941091954026,65.4039408866995,9.52528735632184,32.1876026272578,9.2995712137729,2.739575041050903,839,31,157,14,12,266,117,203,0.028999999999999998,0.73,0.24100000000000002,0.9922,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,3,6,5,4,2,11,0,0,10,0,17,4,0,1,2,29,32,7,0,9,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,2,0,0,12,10,0,0,2,2,1,2,0,1,0,3,3,2,24,10,33,20,4,14,0,0,0,1,31,7,0,5,5,109,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230762484766782,0.12691524864334516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926030279276266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433579373712435,0.12803847479538608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805725321994894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720066080938166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313073436009569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323554179682946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27282940376422443,0.0,0.5678882177045499,0.0,0.0,0.2404291786330491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17098052343990586,0.0,0.0,0.21375139930052375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289922166515583,0.10923838086110316,0.0,0.0,0.12271000734931498,0.1215954446628136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12197432971836986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974556382632642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640322478886022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554114580038766,0.08391009731333966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581369069265132,0.0,0.12167312373711085,0.0,0.0,0.12106727483253762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100289698947074,0.0,0.10578950631695824,0.11143232559458648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608789012350627,0.07057620262933735,0.0,0.0,0.11565367180047845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14277859296733375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579383535719782,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BudaBelly1995,2020/01/30,"Help me idk where to go. I have issues in my love and it's hurting my relationship with my fiancee. She says I've changed from the person I was when we first met. It's been 4 1/2 years now and our relationship has been rocky for 2 of thouse years. She's asked me to change back to the way I was but I just don't know how, no matter how much I want to change I just can't. I want to go see someone avout my mental state but I am not sure which doctor I need to go to. Could any of tou help me out with this one.",0.3271551724137929,1.569098094827588,2.158137931034481,100.25065517241379,80.98275862068967,5.329655172413793,16.772413793103446,5.6839178017228535,-0.9191006896551724,393,6,106,2,10,130,75,116,0.05,0.8170000000000001,0.132,0.7838,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,2,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,2,0,10,2,0,2,1,20,21,7,0,4,5,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,4,6,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,1,0,2,5,2,20,2,15,15,1,14,0,1,1,1,14,3,0,0,6,68,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186323076835933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537819807844608,0.0,0.0,0.12648762075055756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5220463163567111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133703475849634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16836909282375692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992060127109507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804613799616945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22051701377359034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17609685813136275,0.0,0.0,0.1716915623350904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040295015414354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846447373063462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16577373746787893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092382221836548,0.1219720376492596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146705565234977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436319602811647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532152648999873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081418405707218,0.0,0.0,0.13108237784529872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937731318883032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15503596285665044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19404854317502584,0.13056962993489366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21186064861510573
mentalhealth,BBQnNugs,2020/01/30,"When do you have to cut ties? I have a family member that suffers from Bi Polar manic depressive  he has severe mood swings that tend to be laced with extreme hyper-religiosity, actually completely religious centric episodes. He becomes extremely consumed with all things christianity. 

This began 2 years ago in may. He had a severe mental break leading him to 2 weeks in a ward. During that time he lost his wife because in his mania he told her that he cheated on her. Still don't know if that is true, this episode he was convulsing evil out of him while hearing what he described as hundreds of voices in his head, also that he was between satan and god in a battle of sorts, this went on for a couple weeks until we got him admitted in a ward, he was released prematurely, I complained until the head of psychiatry for the state of alabama got him admitted back into the ward for over a week more. He never really had a job due to a life centered around Jam bands and selling drugs, of which where mainly psychedelics, he maintained enough income somehow and an unhealthy consumption of drugs that alter your state of mind, this was for years before any mental illness expressed itself. 

He got out of the ward moved back into my folks place and lived miserably in alabama, while not getting treatment for the previous episode, mainly due to alabamas poor mental health care. At a certain point I said i would let him move in with me in CO and he could get on his feet in a new place and a much better selection in health care and jobs. He did, and about 6 month (early 2019) later he had another major episode, woke me up at 3 am to get me to read a bible chapter, said he had it all figured out he was jesus. He got so agitated about me not wanting to read the bible that he began to get physical about it and i called the cops. I didn't press charges, they couldnt do anything since he wasn't a threat and they left when he went ""to bed"". I locked myself in my room and waited out the night. 

The next day he was gone. Hours later we found out he was in blanding utah street preaching, I'll make this quick. Due to ties with the paramedics and fire departments in Grand junction we were able to have a bed in a ward ready for him. He ended up coming to and asking for help, until this point we thought the first manic episode was drug induced. Now we know there is an issue, he knows there is an issue. He asked for help if it starts up again, he wanted help. 

​

Things have been fine, but early this month after a change of medication he started getting a little more preachy than usual. Me and my roommate mentioned he should tell his doctor about it so they can make sure the meds are right. He said they told him to double the dose and take more as necessary. every week that passed he became more reclusive, more disassociated, again i mention that he should talk about it with his doc. He then began to tell me to accept who he is and that he is just REALLY religious now i must accept that (same tone as the episode where he woke me up). Another week goes by, and i have to firm up with him and let him know that if he won't accept my help anymore he can't live with me anymore. He told me to die in my sin and he doesn't need my materials that i think are so important anymore. 

I don't think i can handle being someones care taker anymore, i didn't sign up for this, i can't its getting to me. Is it time to just part, is there anything i can do to actually get him the help he needs? 

​

Sorry for the novel. thanks for any help in advance.",5.5392456683576015,5.816601059490086,5.805607088741024,82.68258086830492,67.44192634560906,8.493787469530274,29.166480005270444,8.20894155585173,1.8524286580143616,2812,90,562,34,43,897,315,706,0.06,0.848,0.092,0.9671,3,0,3,0,0,0,72.0,5,2,4,5,28,25,5,1,37,0,57,14,3,4,7,89,112,38,1,13,8,1,2,0,0,6,10,5,3,0,35,40,0,1,15,4,2,10,13,11,0,1,39,7,62,13,102,61,15,112,5,4,0,1,99,49,0,6,50,359,97,6,0.06044411371296316,0.0,0.11796947163125107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05358005981741072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04833713589839984,0.0,0.13098234390942326,0.14689242819836862,0.08220814008358529,0.1267618468948057,0.0,0.0,0.2397772759415981,0.0,0.0,0.09948071082701394,0.0538080761008156,0.11301417393208366,0.0,0.0,0.09295558490558474,0.0,0.036846170697442136,0.06675577474313431,0.0514334888503976,0.0,0.0,0.053457906640316084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061720198157986426,0.0,0.18488040695812052,0.0,0.06394185770485121,0.0520672518761241,0.06337450323065427,0.0,0.0,0.0482597064175046,0.06688026215797688,0.0,0.038981452928095725,0.0,0.052060426571347726,0.0,0.06273144713920549,0.0,0.0,0.06186711162161704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102879465129598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05353554398624023,0.06245492719555775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05092677273641948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569813310202207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05141373224635666,0.0,0.06627385084561001,0.0,0.0,0.22105688273361265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19337071764451075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406619759345715,0.12849853276539258,0.06812490909888627,0.0,0.24308649188738835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05952527646775425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617590168515871,0.11996291236073475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287401658603484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656727064062243,0.1236164029710031,0.042693465060275014,0.0,0.0605808811788193,0.1067465195920894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598189029010271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069383051927594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713978418506558,0.060891085522531835,0.18274035004619546,0.0,0.06103132417016074,0.0,0.09649182979041028,0.1284850542979181,0.04443337836788886,0.0896370888671566,0.04661822675685002,0.05837730167509254,0.06428300065725574,0.056722706123059866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06545508491525717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630246791246708,0.0,0.11427844944575295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209209414971131,0.0,0.07744409400902454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05161894284984416,0.17248858111137932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365692875254032,0.0,0.049999995475599586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05121410140043085,0.0,0.0,0.06766223666918587,0.08556530958036253,0.0,0.04827074729001707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05696786184776476,0.0,0.045446451149382616,0.0485826890201457,0.10566163913456986,0.055648818984107874,0.0,0.0,0.08031276669101534,0.0774602948818511,0.0,0.04798587461507328,0.0704908975694305,0.0,0.0,0.1732708227849706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665706517747651,0.0,0.07130300864178296,0.0,0.2424231104390203,0.0,0.0,0.11206459795115813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04293776415534477,0.0,0.14689242819836862,0.07784805498607225
mentalhealth,dontcheckmyredditlol,2020/01/30,"Uncertain about my new therapist My other therapist wasn’t able to stay. I liked her and trusted her a lot, but now I’ve been put in the hands of her supervisor. I met with him for the first time today, and he was very calm, and didn’t automatically give off bad vibes, but I could already tell he was an older Caribbean man, (I am of immediate Caribbean btw) and my experience is that he’d already be kind of more traditional and not open to some of my ideas. 

He went on to say things about how my father and I had different depictions of me (my father in my opinion gaslights and omits a lot of information) and sort of insinuated that he wanted to see which one of us was lying. This already...left a bad taste in my mouth. I can’t really blame him for wanting to study me, as per his job, but his approach to that kind of made me feel untrusting of him. 

The next thing he asked was if I didn’t see how my running outside barefoot, (which I do for fun in the backyard of my grandmothers)  could be seen as crazy. This cemented kind of that cautionary alarm bell in my head. He seemed to be very passively looking for things to judge me on, though that could just be me being overly defensive. I guess I just needed to come here to get some perspective.",9.56593625498008,6.047884179282872,9.571908366533863,71.14256374501996,61.78884462151394,13.545976095617533,38.645816733067726,11.602472056035307,4.077855458167331,983,34,207,22,10,327,138,251,0.107,0.843,0.05,-0.9516,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,0,0,1,9,12,1,2,8,0,22,4,3,3,0,40,39,17,0,7,7,2,2,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,13,11,1,1,4,0,0,5,5,5,0,2,13,8,36,7,40,17,5,23,0,0,4,0,25,10,0,10,8,145,49,1,0.12054786261177705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660551280091873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269597877672664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20130485998649736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038413096028189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28874297767994395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12594685912463902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179189409555906,0.0,0.0,0.06095262139451418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025379503556734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629812827851074,0.1156404942574776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327970613530741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371688509888873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608386375242856,0.0,0.0,0.11962515280184398,0.0,0.0,0.3765961455158328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309756054459814,0.0,0.0,0.05889359656437579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122984383888436,0.0,0.0,0.2049709639203428,0.0,0.11406530232864305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938471267021181,0.0,0.11642587689173232,0.1282040194733091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168635150894582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118389746790408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07722604759354135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586449878580494,0.0,0.0,0.1921220782344008,0.10974224666067396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12848798214066334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536414528481694,0.0,0.0,0.2799307194359445,0.2402599302973286,0.0,0.118437662961142,0.0,0.07029242810915873,0.0,0.11426527846436008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500423605512802,0.0,0.0,0.1989292228963893,0.14220450531169893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174907635847256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,like_sharkwolf_drunk,2020/01/30,"I don’t really know how to do this. After working very hard to make something out of the hand I was dealt in life, I finally made it to the point I’ve always dreamed of, and after thirty this is truly the lowest I’ve ever been. I carry a lot of trauma from past experiences. I’m not a war veteran or anything, and I hate whining about things I’ve been through because it makes me feel like a sissy and I know others have had it a lot harder, but if I listed everything out, it’s a lot to carry.  I live in rural Arkansas, and I don’t think mental health professionals are a huge thing here.  I also work a somewhat high profile job.  I’m just at the point I don’t really know what to do.  I’m not a risk for doing something bad, I’m just not having a good time, and I don’t really have anyone in my life I feel comfortable talking to. I guess I kinda just wish someone would pat me on the back and say “yeah you had it pretty bad.”  Anyway, I appreciate anyone that may have read this.",3.298763736263737,3.80488948076923,5.3514010989011,83.15788461538463,72.46153846153845,8.058241758241758,24.472527472527474,8.192908349453996,1.3169989010989007,764,20,163,11,14,267,117,208,0.105,0.742,0.153,0.8696,2,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,2,10,10,2,1,14,1,20,4,1,4,1,37,36,11,1,3,9,0,4,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,13,8,0,0,6,2,0,0,7,7,0,0,6,5,20,3,22,28,4,18,0,1,0,0,3,11,0,9,8,114,33,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535720494027782,0.1096232013327494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842396915174604,0.0,0.10841570816521204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10130451905369607,0.2200047645229654,0.0803111207415039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917177283715524,0.0,0.0,0.1184047831774416,0.128872839133006,0.0,0.0,0.13322944232798986,0.0941193475866989,0.0,0.14432127089461144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050226933668113,0.0,0.0,0.1451330395812825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801851194368827,0.13007187032973164,0.0,0.14003980582904835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919685109639235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073754689756992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21721241965159827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18611215018699068,0.06436442639748048,0.0,0.11633410557220715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360171382923766,0.0,0.12466122268849955,0.17588291654898902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327689511927445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576643612590507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490850522012817,0.0,0.0,0.13403301544072085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317816227430268,0.0,0.2531995265836504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476968356798633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162793319858212,0.20284896909842529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589242056881408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17505233734517012,0.08441749817112874,0.0,0.0,0.07682213482049187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870422314441942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515013641123438,0.0,0.0,0.1918252710943048,0.0,0.0,0.09358855740440614,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,falling-faster,2020/01/30,"Curious if this is something to question Ive noticed i will go from extremely-horrible-cant-funtion/generally-not-okay-and-unsociable to generally-happy-social/bouncing-off-the-walls-happy-motivated. The happy times tend to be much shorter and far and few between than Very long pretty much depressed and horrible. The happy times coming after an absolute meltdown sometimes. Not sure really what this pattern is, but ive read somethings that make me think some kind of bi polar.",11.106071428571427,10.29958079761905,10.58095238095238,56.60571428571429,56.5,13.161904761904767,46.0,12.161744961471696,6.119057142857143,393,21,53,10,4,128,64,84,0.081,0.8,0.11900000000000001,0.4035,0,0,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,3,0,6,1,0,1,1,12,11,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,8,9,4,7,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,3,4,33,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754789189208556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775246177911699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713863112975953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4388217304108789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146347215983304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824033062224927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375818674997562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30303318783297106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346607428680438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096907753496544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23089346183096296,0.0,0.20616853660240475,0.0,0.13204111159456064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101060019820744,0.0,0.3173513441390804,0.20385078949689775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942588366433126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206873385916576,0.0,0.0,0.2403720152315629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700646125134478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mack7793,2020/01/30,"Wake Therapy/ Sleep Deprivation Does anyone have experience with this? I’ve been reading a lot into. My therapist seemed to imply that she didn’t think it was a great idea and I felt somewhat judged. I just know anecdotally it appears to help me. I work overnight shift occasionally and I notice a marked improvement in my mood the next day and it seems to carry on until I let go and let myself sleep too long again. 

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.sciencefocus.com/the-human-body/wake-therapy-the-new-technique-that-starves-people-of-sleep-to-treat-depression/amp/",11.213703703703706,16.045644938271607,7.0039506172839525,60.87777777777782,62.58024691358025,7.550617283950618,23.814814814814817,8.515128840125781,1.9190592592592592,484,12,63,8,9,131,64,81,0.035,0.8420000000000001,0.12300000000000001,0.7906,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,6,3,3,0,0,16,13,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,6,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,1,10,1,8,7,2,10,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,5,5,42,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3525413556828444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375413379796878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491928798633426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423679903339942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15913854463082142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15620448446971325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245844670546947,0.0,0.0,0.17936236229545918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904528406951863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18365317606996148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940820675544388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33271579197094336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397237021313647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831018420587965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15712356688222995,0.17301886286858328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18521957768395725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16273045424854116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29620722975579417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4884117575513325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604610981339315,0.18889148311326895,0.0,0.10424289470695626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184376578910262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jim-Halpert-Did-9-11,2020/01/30,"Did I just have a mental breakdown? I don’t know if this fits here, but I genuinely don’t know what just happened. So worst case scenario this post gets deleted.

To start off: I have always been a relatively tame guy.  Only got into fights were i defended myself, never had an anxiety or panic attack, i’ve never self harmed or anything like that. To put it simply i’ve never really had any issues with anxiety, panic attacks, anger issues or anything of that sort.

I’ve been pretty stressed recently and its taken its toll, But about four hours ago something happened that made me vividly angry, (i dont want to get into detail) and  anxious, but for some reason my brain shut down entirely, and i started uncontrollably and forcefully laughing and crying. 

The problem is i laughed-cried for close to an hour (give or take 48 minutes based off the clock on my tv/phone). Although the laughter was similar to “The jokers” laughing.

It was uncontrollable and almost comically exaggerated and regardless of what i did, it wouldn’t stop. When i finally did stop, i felt as if i couldn’t breathe for the next half hour, and light headed for the next two. I was still vividly angry and anxious, but i have no clue what happened.

Has anyone heard of this, or knows what happened? Im worried as i’ve never had anything like this happen, and dont know what triggered it. Ive been in more stressful/dangerous/hot headed situations, but this has never happened before. 

It’s also not a “straw that broke the camels back” type of thing as i was actually having a great day, and had also gotten great news earlier that day at work.",7.3027450980392175,7.189343784313728,7.471830065359478,73.55323529411766,63.77124183006536,9.81437908496732,34.01307189542484,9.325443323948027,3.0824758169934645,1282,49,224,20,17,416,174,306,0.215,0.66,0.125,-0.9854,0,0,1,0,1,0,42.0,0,0,0,1,10,19,4,5,13,0,29,4,4,3,5,54,52,31,0,7,15,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,0,2,23,15,0,2,6,1,0,1,13,13,0,3,21,5,20,6,26,29,3,36,0,1,2,0,5,11,0,10,25,156,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.07954506594512997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225648013143933,0.0,0.08162363487086223,0.0,0.0,0.1303720567522948,0.06782546212014078,0.0,0.0,0.05543173020741896,0.0,0.12471465753364852,0.1841732921589149,0.0,0.05699588256008526,0.0,0.2012351058349648,0.0,0.0,0.1854659280779467,0.0,0.06267857293110138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936167816672954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099562193013012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790767128183908,0.10513846339821807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19106558532370985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826539708883452,0.0892936602214401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517450233533587,0.07819483116753828,0.0,0.0,0.06519350419305846,0.17973704859372766,0.0,0.08071082379040315,0.4324908014652965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673119957675344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408220691280241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880481786117302,0.17015708015722586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17918995932724846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964640534909675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712970369880368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214607273254369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3143397923498296,0.0,0.17338029765584406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061994415872156025,0.0,0.1912762129250483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806705552914273,0.08292816758770398,0.0,0.07799706611242857,0.0,0.08194321948874142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052219404561415265,0.08380908361605913,0.08048439164511226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850359820726674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162418430063833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275279732039997,0.0,0.0,0.11539083966503676,0.0,0.06509649866716777,0.13629726942857634,0.09337302613357748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061287736626466575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05415370802576597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962649317415882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04807856173354506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05934253652563985,0.08278055011739781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Angry__Jonny,2020/01/30,"Having really bad existential anxiety and feel like I dont know who I am anymore. I've dealt with a lot the last few years. Coming off of benzos cold Turkey nearly killed me and seemed to open my mind to how meaningless life is. And how I'm not really a person I'm just dust, I have no ego or soul. The thoughts abated for a year or so. But I dont know why lately I've been having massive existential crisis. It hits me constantly during the day, this fear that I'm dying and I dont really exist. My mind is disconnected from my body. I feel this fog and pressure in head. This distance from myself. I cant ground myself in reality, I question this. What is reality, is this even real. It all feels like my mind is watching my body like a movie. Objects around me cause fear as their prescene is sensory perception. I feel the objects hit my eyes and I question the whole process. Is it real, am I real? 

I'm fully functional, all of these are just thoughts that cause fear. But it can be overwhelming and pulls me out of many moments. Hard to focus and enjoy what's going on around me. I do feel much calmer inside my house in the dark. 

I hope this passes soon. I just needed to get my thoughts out to someone. I feel like I'm going crazy and I dont know who I am.",0.8994252873563191,3.169547218390808,2.9751724137931035,89.76206896551727,84.47892720306513,5.898850574712642,19.727969348659002,7.237678284180719,0.5147808429118776,988,28,209,15,29,333,134,261,0.139,0.79,0.071,-0.9590000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,0,10,13,1,5,10,0,23,5,4,4,2,55,49,17,2,2,8,0,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,17,16,0,0,16,0,0,5,7,7,0,0,4,10,33,6,23,42,6,25,1,1,2,0,6,12,0,7,12,135,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825219298813763,0.0,0.08848114734174375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15884742341677618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449403156630077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982041079962424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833047163246776,0.0,0.0768541583740926,0.0,0.09641390520374653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05753879164039182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925951034431934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182554147458378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058928223608553085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30118810645820165,0.2706704549020595,0.19121394026149727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04661317832261583,0.0,0.10141028217944452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992258506949954,0.0,0.09156430246601302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861447106431121,0.0,0.10294659970026517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987074631528056,0.0,0.1470970765674455,0.07272528868241906,0.10064277388010198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301792791153192,0.17435133724298035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585069460062364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045393289932888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702568822748831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558613668157967,0.06615466320729778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790247782469592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19989111100102389,0.0,0.0,0.3046518269936905,0.17146768222763598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122151037431846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559486084228012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21248945591522475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805061550030257,0.09960968456028968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490805701151666
mentalhealth,litanything33,2020/01/30,"My mental health is deteriorating I've been away for almost four months and I have a gecko at home. My mom's been taking care of her for me.  I just got home today, I missed her so much went straight to her after I washed my hands.  I grabbed her gently from the back of the cage and pulled her out gently but her nose hit a plastic bamboo on the way out.  I wasn't pulling fast I didn't hurt her, but I just feel badly about it and I wish I could communicate with her and hear back from her that she knows it's an accident and I love her so much.
I'm trying to get therapy but they're not answering me. I'll try another therapist but this one was highly recommended to me for my situation",2.106141552511417,3.5550318287671274,3.8645890410958894,89.02555936073061,76.60273972602741,7.3324200913242015,21.070776255707763,8.07648339933343,0.7072803652968038,541,13,125,9,12,182,91,146,0.067,0.774,0.158,0.9088,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,6,0,8,5,2,0,0,21,21,11,0,2,7,1,3,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,4,8,0,0,3,0,0,3,3,3,0,2,7,5,29,2,18,12,2,17,0,2,0,1,14,7,0,1,6,85,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707790282448401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17883428274699664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16023531171311814,0.2622815265181968,0.1424003243373932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388489140461896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616857428587553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623411333810167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910420837714443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640268914244227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18128438094003566,0.1922198130485411,0.0,0.0,0.18019315886952972,0.3421467824275121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825749922865419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372863378834922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15392608609732245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17187211152246468,0.0,0.0,0.19974357138023327,0.1361296604161453,0.0,0.2507445748101649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556763159709535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917029201571976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282307522931696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19503632079484445,0.19801918961296855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16165941264327988,0.0,0.0,0.23158157941754026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537293868376046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809955824134592,0.0,0.0,0.19612160158379888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IndependentResource5,2020/01/30,"I tell myself I hate myself around 5 times an hour every hour I am awake.. What is wrong with me? I try to be healthy.. work hard.. I just hate myself. I can never seem to say the right thing and often look like I am a liar when my mind just gets jumbled. I try to stay positive and I always help the homeless, stray animals.. I do what I can for the world but I feel like I’m taking up air that should go to someone that likes themselves.",-0.2365982404692097,1.8797336881720448,1.5373802541544492,99.09879765395893,88.46236559139786,4.242033235581624,15.981427174975565,5.565023196281405,-0.8467763440860216,335,7,79,2,11,109,64,93,0.098,0.76,0.142,0.6059,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,5,7,3,0,5,0,8,0,0,0,1,13,17,4,0,1,3,0,2,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,4,17,3,8,15,0,12,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,2,8,51,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16079412425804016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202774046717398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628160357697444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770975142155568,0.13805323952366802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096178547125467,0.0,0.10982476975843676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731082749227578,0.38157602087882775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952708641459115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806119658411795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832271303008038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227592270265356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19512091038232146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490413483385202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165028946344883,0.0,0.15367503697480125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17592168140323125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373464324325301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20597192554464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529510939644227,0.0,0.1689033910106894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838243611086167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126818752044949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26239938793110146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14068361487886633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21128149949955025,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,disisamfthrowawayacc,2020/01/30,"Doubting literally everything. Hi guys im a 16 year old male and I just need some confirmation or help. So, i feel kinda numb lately. Like im just a vessel moving and im not really gonna go anywhere in life or do anything ever. And im doubting EVERYTHING i do. I doubt how i feel i doubt what i see i doubt that im even living here in reality sometimes. The doubt is just overwhelming and i dissociate sometimes which adds even more doubt like ""omg are you insane? Why are you dissociating and feeling like this you have brain damage"" things like that. So, how do i stop these if i even can.",0.5712500000000027,3.0386479583333355,2.969999999999999,87.1275,90.25,6.0,20.0,7.413659706084162,0.8355000000000001,465,15,96,9,16,159,71,120,0.221,0.662,0.11599999999999999,-0.9055,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,0,12,14,0,8,3,0,8,3,1,2,1,30,15,12,0,2,7,0,3,4,0,1,2,0,0,2,7,6,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,10,0,0,0,4,14,4,2,14,2,9,0,2,1,0,7,2,0,12,9,57,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10614069596478327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14398589055330965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555729795542165,0.11667105369101358,0.0,0.0,0.2318403173248937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956506022652673,0.0921443324557749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733030976412936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277118568371966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645350847104018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.696610185198869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14549662858780854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110337183910062,0.2520551727722706,0.0,0.11389293248039442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13708680779300125,0.0,0.09563806809906276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353442742499526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262878268706378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278147041377933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551317901298163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783421939643796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08568950584063201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638564481005048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305978784263625
mentalhealth,Waffle_and_honey,2020/01/30,"Today marked a switch between therapy (programs? Sessions?) The first one was called STAIR, and this one starting next week is called CPT. I was diagnosed with PTSD back in 2013. I was a US Army Combat Medic and my time spent in Afghanistan was less than ideal.

After I tried to kill myself in 2013 I spent 6 months in the hospital recovering and was subsequently discharged from the Army with ""Honorable under Medical Conditions"". 

I immediately turned to drinking and spent the next several years hiking across the US in a drunken stupor. Trying to forget everything.

In July of 2019 I decided that I would try to kill myself again. Called a hotline, was talked into going to the hospital, and I met some really good people there. Doctors, nurses, and fellow patients.

Today in therapy was sort of a shift from STAIR to CPT, and my therapist and I had to talk about some very serious shit. One of the things that I cant really get over, even now, is that she said we would do this like role play thing called an ""empty chair confession"" or something. Where I would sit in front of an empty chair and talk to someone that I cant talk to anymore. For obvious reasons... My blood turned into ice when she said that..

I'm getting side tracked.

After all of these years I can say that I am finally starting to get help. Its been 6 months or so of therapy with some more lined up. I never thought that I could ever get to a place like this. I still struggle daily with suicidal ideation, intrusive thoughts, x, y, and z. But its starting to get a little bit easier to deal with.

I hope that you all get the help that you deserve, and remember that if you have a bad experience while dealing with a mental health provider that that doesn't mean that is how it will always be. Just stay strong, and keep looking until you find the provider that works for you.

 I believe in you. You can do this.",4.652333333333335,6.218202455555558,5.0155555555555535,82.85166666666667,70.27777777777777,8.333333333333334,28.055555555555557,8.841846274778883,2.1535555555555557,1484,53,282,27,27,470,197,360,0.09,0.823,0.087,-0.3281,0,0,2,0,0,2,49.0,3,7,0,5,13,14,3,1,20,0,27,8,2,2,5,52,52,21,3,7,5,0,0,2,1,4,5,3,0,0,24,21,1,1,8,2,3,2,4,6,0,4,17,4,36,8,50,29,8,51,1,0,1,0,31,21,1,8,28,198,60,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688284614674457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971565568829432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06180748673149861,0.06711419041885053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905610690877404,0.0,0.0,0.08775446589335699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283090807369893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417712646519483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16573711322046694,0.0,0.08158430935497228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227263987533691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787420898570287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05309042801353957,0.07270858039903899,0.0,0.0,0.07224062789643818,0.07862735413157475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805268628898608,0.07346613514882439,0.06837143947534008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519723253147507,0.0,0.045681975089260016,0.06741917941693458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544049684568096,0.0,0.0,0.10775443732758172,0.0,0.0,0.07983577153537097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144570113051814,0.1778577783618279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853950579310605,0.08056217414898778,0.0,0.0,0.06749920509548649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755770760854628,0.0,0.16194938536820816,0.08100443362107985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831757221529771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061994240252408774,0.0,0.17097071528170413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16340330830046362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055725577042733315,0.0,0.08398030217963083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396026563248372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298735289025407,0.0826443325260885,0.0,0.0,0.09105520717794434,0.0,0.15292013849704095,0.06392163831861519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080685614780576,0.08250921966530092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810596471396259,0.06188067957463767,0.0,0.0,0.17068076356906745,0.08567470154968702,0.06419180893063274,0.0,0.0,0.08403093874665236,0.0,0.08792299855141618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584265515659424,0.0,0.0,0.2757656241302525,0.09332772000422628,0.10680219519175213,0.0,0.0,0.12762595433433965,0.04687039751984008,0.0,0.15238224566728165,0.0,0.0,0.16371883586832858,0.1748613624737131,0.0,0.0,0.19337520039598807,0.0,0.0,0.06632216304284833,0.0,0.0,0.06447622570322037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851781346320301,0.0,0.0,0.17129957006933388,0.0,0.0,0.10352455165575652
mentalhealth,j16f03,2020/01/30,I’m not gonna live past 19 I just have this feeling. I don’t know why like I’m sure very very sure I’m not gonna make it past that age. I think I’m having depersonalization? First therapist said yes second said no and didn’t talk through things with me. I’m not real. Things around aren’t real. I fell like my brain is plastic wrapped and I’m trapped inside. I’m not my body I’m am just viewing  through my eyes. I’m not suicidal definitely not. I’m pretty happy but I feel that’s kind of my default setting and I’m just going through the motions. I wish someone could just help me. I’m currently diagnosed with general anxiety disorder so I don’t know what the hell is going on will me???? Anyone have experience with these things? Or have any idea what to do?????,0.1303363095238126,2.4755539562500037,2.278928571428576,92.29416666666671,90.6875,5.547619047619048,21.36904761904762,7.07126945348624,0.6734672619047624,603,22,133,10,21,202,89,160,0.14,0.738,0.122,-0.7045,2,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,1,0,2,1,14,4,3,1,2,33,39,6,1,2,12,0,2,2,0,3,1,2,0,0,10,7,0,0,6,0,0,4,11,1,0,2,3,6,14,6,10,32,0,12,1,0,2,0,4,2,1,1,7,69,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685109133541643,0.0,0.10895159363111456,0.0,0.0,0.09958400011895492,0.0,0.0,0.12678479011262045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581975060799683,0.0,0.15898881845651872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11371149448971395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455420886904746,0.0,0.0,0.16322668260880993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393149621761615,0.0,0.0,0.14402456594844518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114313917389792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16188215162481012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15160968933456342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546172274527327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16077585312265869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830944416296235,0.15654159677366652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915930912022215,0.0,0.12576025814766714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950670522636907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719137160286818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14489324982752355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32421231319128524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709497673677088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12067276080814315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15578534153785498,0.0,0.268460013102908,0.0,0.0,0.11447251931076792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536163433172074,0.28385433951976663,0.09125755778980844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350243051621449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851270414443156,0.0,0.16377699872945858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Charlie1128,2020/01/30,Need advice form someone experienced or willing to talk My life is weird right now and I don’t really feel like throwing it all up in some incoherent reddit rant. I don’t know how to dm but I just want to have a friend or someone to talk to.,1.3094117647058852,3.3191007254901983,3.427215686274512,88.6584705882353,80.96078431372548,6.432941176470589,21.964705882352945,7.554174236665415,0.8016164705882352,191,6,42,3,5,65,40,51,0.06,0.789,0.151,0.6797,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,1,12,9,5,0,2,4,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,2,4,2,7,8,3,5,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,2,28,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29665437115709004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534989153225909,0.21687725345065145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345447664675601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683935236594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144271767776996,0.14831360793436804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22510035052460964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19448079949726765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25925523187014443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5144438456329166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4880114009088437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17905905291627025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheGoldenClaw4,2020/01/30,"No one wants to help As soon as I go to my therapist I shut down and don’t talk about anything real. I’ve tried to go to 3 different places for autism diagnosis but they all declined me. But I think I have voices in my head. It yells so I punch myself in the head. I don’t feel any emotions anymore either. Time is warped a month has passed but I can barely remember any of it. If I look as myself in the mirror too long my face begins to disappear and I see eyes and mouth looking back at me. My mind is so scattered I can’t keep track of anything. People, life anything. 
Think I should just go to the psych ward but I’m worried they won’t accept me.",0.7478108941418284,2.7081340431654692,2.628905447070917,93.89850719424463,82.66906474820144,5.410277492291882,20.000513874614594,6.5431188927421005,0.0820355601233298,508,14,115,5,14,169,89,139,0.053,0.9059999999999999,0.040999999999999995,-0.128,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,0,7,1,0,0,4,0,10,6,5,0,1,21,23,13,0,3,7,0,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,2,3,0,1,5,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,7,22,1,18,21,2,18,0,0,4,0,4,7,0,1,6,74,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22265598191211747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623557130738728,0.0,0.0,0.4041566077516747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588240659820513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17104145637147958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841510157062304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277638049441112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791194368107845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33602610421774715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973094530891768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14551241726550074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563277522835345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448776480033857,0.2749492927223462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529980360445154,0.0,0.13067126373760746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093371144679393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349546985604915,0.0,0.17104145637147958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186337112845746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854508121750945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045517883779714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158339693262924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19007920589769306,0.0,0.20979671840993852,0.0,0.0,0.09546025489829776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114792157834567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656003277949353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16625482012419293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,potatomildew,2020/01/30,"Mom is threatening to have me committed My mom has been really overbearing about my stuff lately. It seems off. She says if I don’t start going back to my therapist and psychiatrist that she’s going to have me admitted over hallucinations, self harm, and suicide risk... which idk if i am even going to like it’s not usually something i think about when i attempted i just did... can she even do that? The psychiatrist office did send me a letter and has been trying to get ahold of me but if they could do it involuntarily they would have tried already probably. I mean I feel fine mostly I have been having some bad hallucinations, but they might not be hallucinations I might end up getting abducted. My grandma said a ufo visited a long time ago... there’s something going on. someone wants me gone. maybe by trying to have me committed my mom is trying to make a more of a record for suicide, so that when I die they will believe it was suicide. I’m not really sure who wants me. If i’m being watched to be abducted how would being dead work? Maybe they’ll try to say I had a breakdown and ran off, then when the aliens are done they can kill me, it’ll be suicide and case done. there’s also a demon, the only thing i can come up with is that it follows my family. My dad and his mom were hospitalized for hallucinations. I don’t know the specifics but maybe they were just seeing the demon and no one believed them. I’m scared but I can’t tell anyone because what if they try to hospitalize me too?? I don’t want them to take me but they just keep following me.",3.0066239316239347,4.932014192307693,4.49871794871795,83.39072649572653,75.34615384615384,7.827350427350428,24.055555555555557,8.626192665926032,1.5876658119658118,1236,39,252,25,27,412,157,312,0.207,0.7609999999999999,0.032,-0.9968,0,0,2,0,0,5,33.0,0,0,11,2,17,8,1,2,12,0,46,0,0,2,3,47,75,24,7,11,16,5,1,1,0,7,0,3,0,1,15,9,0,1,6,0,0,11,8,5,0,1,14,6,48,3,25,48,3,29,2,0,2,0,30,6,0,10,13,185,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734773623037887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628985911017914,0.0697790941320768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061011863329846226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709496113777585,0.07285563992446263,0.05319083072914337,0.0,0.0,0.19661667970526944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516385905650835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06966731756659424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09055860413758872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17858765122447054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728347354050534,0.0,0.0,0.11526436011969372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225778352669492,0.0,0.044119573040300064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117597381166698,0.0,0.19835981078639986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755770043906839,0.09653653107655373,0.0,0.047953960959502134,0.0,0.09842927736139356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04262918108821154,0.0,0.0,0.07721937024564426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05824447695367909,0.0,0.26298303366676995,0.09504804838334048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18513098716597975,0.0,0.4087756339437808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591273495600457,0.06636259776165794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940774034102494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117976608541265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830010350866882,0.13877994610852742,0.08735910697708936,0.0,0.06953223560684929,0.07943515728083182,0.09102769328762328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393225800597536,0.13434883088762042,0.0,0.0,0.06176069062302535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09988796344598122,0.3817783561755873,0.0,0.08223833953947443,0.0,0.06560612526541068,0.0,0.07626613913180524,0.0,0.0,0.10131167076835068,0.057969426640412526,0.05591052415083251,0.0,0.0,0.05088004166497075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3554491376692504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610084855645773,0.0,0.15439866035008398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352386462885101,0.0,0.0,0.12396921046850445,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,homosaphien1,2020/01/30,"How can I help my mentally ill/depressed dad who refuses to leave the house and treatment? TLDR: my dad suffered a cerebral stroke in December 2018, since March 2019 he has been severely depressed I am going to visit him for 3 days how can I help?

December 2018 I get a phone call from my mom that my dad (age 72) collapsed and he is in the emergency room. Later we discovered that he had cerebral stroke doctors give him medicine and by March 2019 he's doing fine walking again and physically normal.

Starting in March 2019 he wanted to be socially alone. He started telling us that he does not want people coming to his house starting getting paranoid about small stuff like selling the car because no one is using it anymore or being paranoid about people stealing stuff from his house. He also started worrying about money for his funeral and always had the money for his funeral services in his pocket. Fast forward to today my dad is now severely paranoid he keeps calling my sister thinking my sister is getting kidnapped or is alone. when it rains he starts telling everyone it might flood be careful. For every situation, he always thinks the most negative case that can happen.

My dad used to be very positive, social, talkative person before his stroke but now he has completely changed he also refuses to go to a psychiatrist or for therapy, my mom once forced him to go to a psychiatrist he went and told the psychiatrist that he is financially very unstable and did not discuss anything else. the psychiatrist gave him SSRIs which he took for 3 weeks but had no impact on his mental health. In the last week, he came home from barbershop went to the bathroom and then went to bed my mom who sleeps next to him said his breathing was really weird so he tried to wake him up and he won't wake up. She asked neighbors for help she took him to emergency there they found that he had taken six sleeping pills and pumped his stomach and when asked why did he do this he said because he's not able to sleep at night all night he just staring at the wall so he went to the pharmacist who is his longtime friend and ask for some sleeping pills. In the 3rd world if you know pharmacists really well they give whatever pills you want.

One time guests arrive in my house and he did not want guest so without telling anyone he sneaked out of the house and went 4 hours drive on the bus to his brother's house without telling anyone my mom thought he was kidnapped and called the police but later my uncle luckily called my mom and told him that my dad arrived to his house looking like a homeless person. When asked where did you spend the night he said he slept at the bus stop.

I'm going to visit him for 5 days what can I do in these 5 days to convince him to either go to the doctor with me or make him feel better I want to help him I live far away and don't have many options other than sending him money which I do occasionally. I have been very stressed about the situation and the suffering that my mom is going through because of my dad's mental state.",7.643577861470447,7.042155343485621,7.2989683969215715,76.68857704273786,63.24703891708968,10.197718465149283,35.30817095136729,9.454032385205345,3.1405058785000826,2452,96,456,38,31,774,268,591,0.10300000000000001,0.8340000000000001,0.063,-0.9193,0,2,0,0,0,0,29.0,2,3,2,1,21,14,0,1,25,0,40,18,9,5,1,65,96,37,2,7,16,16,4,2,4,2,9,3,4,2,22,23,0,4,6,0,5,22,11,6,1,3,30,9,61,8,65,60,4,79,0,3,2,0,122,24,0,9,36,271,83,3,0.050844400105652415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531892928136508,0.0,0.08132049678982886,0.08461322789574661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050423982606942495,0.07110317349011665,0.0,0.04184060906329934,0.0,0.19013060243715035,0.0,0.047769987594564224,0.0,0.0,0.09298282315123747,0.0,0.04326483962289248,0.0,0.0,0.04496774006710135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076712690103879,0.058152448618126726,0.05183925450934645,0.0,0.053786633584916026,0.043797948620159434,0.053309386155583394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837129544761712,0.0,0.08758441461593823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040827959396792,0.04449427716682237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04247397207735062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04283859999000728,0.04858400318984925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02570845639670644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05574826036722666,0.03928225739663934,0.0,0.07969230158993441,0.09754916314655868,0.17337626573821502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04496153509721845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05404521972097105,0.0,0.0,0.13631971854745,0.0,0.05100107890495724,0.0,0.05007149227960287,0.4106732785546425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04519283897297318,0.0,0.0,0.027942752602130326,0.04144497219779045,0.0,0.053836878360064636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04968001128354235,0.0,0.04489653680588299,0.0,0.04269649059936223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033939031883760226,0.0515482413629766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15371758972789887,0.05393787363817428,0.0,0.3572900813777316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054073596329504335,0.1431420756150985,0.049816716815231366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414762673081154,0.06890696275001469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049821025249957,0.08879073802464045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514444930590693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450940032528324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487939967256534,0.0,0.04205901317892892,0.1143024720312176,0.2035244772933564,0.10365892584284986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17993964044735966,0.0,0.0,0.04250819514985478,0.058242088535728626,0.0,0.116409347409648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17776098699996185,0.0,0.05814500265422089,0.0,0.0,0.06515807716161454,0.0,0.04036477430928398,0.02964777858144049,0.0,0.0481945462204995,0.0971680063796985,0.11297999865095733,0.03452001015766055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061159553021233874,0.08782647385646764,0.0,0.12585586483051905,0.14994672257648184,0.0,0.08156862175563567,0.0,0.045715221861959546,0.2356663414309343,0.045879162754812235,0.0,0.0,0.0980243746304,0.0,0.0,0.051634956353203525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,billclintonspen,2020/01/30,"Irrationally scared of my bedroom Not sure this is the right place, but I was considering a therapist visit to discuss this and thought I may start here to get used to it a bit before going. I am 23 and always incredibly uneasy in my bedroom. The rest of the house is fine but when I try to go to sleep I can’t open my eyes in the room while it’s dark because I’m so scared of what I could see. I’ve slept with a pillow fully covering my face for years because of this. I can be in the dark outside or in any other room of the house but not the bedroom. I know it’s not haunted, but in my mind I don’t feel safe there. I have fought the feeling my whole life but it’s really been bad lately. I’m starting to not sleep and when I do I get insanely vivid nightmares, which I have gotten my whole life. I was wondering if this could be a therapist issue for me to discuss or if I just need to try and get over it? Any thoughts or discussion would be really appreciated!",3.84715196998124,4.035354863414638,5.353170731707318,84.76971857410884,71.09756097560975,8.649155722326455,27.4765478424015,8.617729084823388,1.701030018761725,757,24,170,12,13,257,107,205,0.105,0.816,0.079,-0.6496,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,6,7,1,2,12,0,19,7,5,1,1,36,40,18,0,6,15,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,6,0,12,6,0,1,6,0,0,3,6,4,0,0,8,5,23,3,22,25,4,21,0,0,3,0,5,11,0,7,7,116,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109157069956744,0.0,0.0,0.17842164470200686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953463856138974,0.15993925589666022,0.0,0.11162942823082596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322088434336347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209482325791396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326629343030301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056174514553344,0.0,0.14911179286957738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027415311589525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692386105278076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209626854876333,0.0,0.14798326294048464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18532077836420788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246023113659666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727258642341814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13706120848830922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16808192730668542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203193104337199,0.0,0.0,0.2626796832119608,0.0,0.10453807424460428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625610221748488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185707926845714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364103598135567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046335809051273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20829369603984502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17813305353768133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330238532699335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929284552364355,0.0,0.0,0.1422653718724846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319060731253774,0.0,0.0,0.08447933497427881
mentalhealth,Chemical-Vanilla,2020/01/30,"Can hearing voices be normal? I regularly hear things other people don’t hear. They aren’t distressing 98% of the time, and I can almost always discern that they’re hallucinations. They are usually either unintelligible whispers and crowds in the distance, people calling my name, nonsensical strings of words, or two particular man and woman’s voices making comments about what I’m thinking and doing. I’ve heard them for four years, since I was fifteen, and live a normal life with no mental health history aside from relatively mild depression. Can this be normal? Does anyone else experience this? Is it ok? Do I need to talk to someone?",6.480432645034416,8.848374309734517,7.0588790560472,66.81677482792531,66.96460176991151,8.916027531956734,31.13962635201573,9.444778638647367,3.2900411012782698,519,21,77,11,9,170,87,113,0.087,0.893,0.02,-0.8105,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,3,0,1,3,0,1,3,1,12,2,0,1,0,18,20,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,2,7,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,2,7,8,1,9,16,1,4,0,1,0,0,14,1,0,2,3,49,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15897453882363405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210048263727045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110082166662991,0.16266769752058674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621110289041798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13673918050406692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893136178602594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262305080366787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529709077397216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16875374659324371,0.5367999182255611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213641166040658,0.0,0.0,0.1401873992588163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597308727213343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599920666298414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771803346316595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4666513143409174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201274630698046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132736046967716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451626728700866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760473781739656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10547264615949016,0.10172656988539816,0.0,0.0,0.09257384352613958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508479928065502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17485097546843506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223580504130593
mentalhealth,jacnguyen947,2020/01/30,"How come there are people who get a kick out of making other people miserable and driving them to suicide So I've been a victim of a bunch of cyber bullying. These people have ruined my life. I used to post on a website called yahoo answers. People on there started cyber bullying me and painted me as a ""troll"" when I'm not one. They bash me and call me names and threatened to call the cops on me. They recently somehow figured out my ip address and found my physical address and my cell number. They called in a bomb threat to a local gas station in my area and made my number pop up on the caller ID at the gas station using some kind of spoofing device. The cops came to my house and arrested me and charged me with a felony ""making a bomb threat"". Now i have to face a judge and my life is ruined now. I probably can't get a job anymore. I'm becoming suicidal and they keep on texting my phone using multiple phone numbers taunting me saying that I'm a loser now who now has no life and has to live with my parents forever. They also taunted me and said no woman will ever want to be with you now cause your a felon. They said "" its your fault you live with it lol"". Hearing that makes me just want to kill myself. Why do people get kicks out of ruining people's lives ?? How come people thinks its funny to do this to people ? Has anyone ever had experiences like this with cyber bullies ?",4.767242063492064,5.291573875000001,5.77452380952381,81.36825396825398,69.17857142857143,8.07936507936508,28.41269841269841,7.984000788550335,1.8276746031746027,1095,36,211,13,18,363,148,280,0.21899999999999997,0.747,0.034,-0.9958,2,0,0,0,0,2,24.0,0,4,7,1,16,12,4,1,17,1,14,4,1,10,2,48,39,19,3,2,2,1,0,1,0,1,3,4,2,1,11,24,0,1,4,0,0,4,4,10,0,1,7,4,35,2,34,30,2,29,0,5,0,0,28,14,0,2,11,146,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592235700109486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415357160927013,0.06638327032825769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485221492199943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3877716651295499,0.10858445628742044,0.0,0.0975280850966661,0.0,0.16356237958798395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17175478197100358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286815938166773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409526485627554,0.0,0.0,0.14880448620935322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070026920946303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954638742842007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942119024003268,0.08438578193310331,0.10503548472797096,0.09886393308506604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20117380368169094,0.04638220007725388,0.0,0.25149754588676204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983319041649106,0.1901167403054529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433284635838697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541807019010373,0.0,0.0,0.5265477214741233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092492682184433,0.0,0.10235985858356964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374040523278912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18061668170653825,0.0754989781975458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719802342575848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20769481900976502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06083281572362115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459893814782521,0.0,0.0,0.11199448160793504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566731171317332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CallMeViper,2020/01/30,"Concerning thoughts reappeared after years, should I worry Background info: I was bullied bad in the second grade after moving schools by one person, shortly after and for a few years after I had the thought “Why am I me?”, especially while looking at myself in the mirror. It went away by middle school and I haven’t thought much of it since.
Recently though, these thoughts have popped up again. I remember hearing somewhere that these types of thoughts are linked to anxiety. I was wondering if this is even remotely true and/or these thoughts are potentially concerning, or if they aren’t much to be worried about.
(I’m not trying to self diagnose I’m just curious as to whether these thoughts mean anything or not)
Thanks in advance.",6.364999999999995,8.417064893939397,5.5595151515151535,78.71427272727273,66.72727272727272,8.613333333333333,35.92727272727272,9.120678840339163,3.4645399999999995,594,30,98,11,10,179,90,132,0.107,0.833,0.06,-0.7506,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,1,5,3,0,0,4,0,12,1,0,0,1,24,27,10,0,3,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,8,2,0,0,12,0,0,3,4,1,0,2,11,2,10,2,21,14,3,20,0,0,1,0,4,8,0,5,9,74,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723194214358838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459332022260527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194156041550258,0.0,0.1061240533114604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12900487275987382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394903339629113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325210130245242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673285627569216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13845028558176226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350882831081632,0.18686776696986665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612694917485382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097971925985578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254969362328252,0.0,0.14398069321155255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572660614354128,0.0,0.0,0.13259409683712625,0.0,0.0,0.10513928769572264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170175543706316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12487611932484985,0.7063281586221369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629325808918009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178239307065758,0.11468891273306685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783564822290073,0.0,0.2581545367258091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16369779580734914
mentalhealth,paristsouk,2020/01/30,"Exhausted all the time... In December 2019 I (19F) went through a really really rough break up with my “first love” (we dated for 14 months, travelled over seas together, ate, slept, did EVERYTHING together). 

After the break up I chose to leave my part job at the time because I was working with all of his old friends (he used to work there also) and I had already planned to leave anyway. 

I have a new job now but ever since the break up I just feel like I am exhausted all the time... like everything is a chore. 

I’ve been chasing temporary highs by going out with friends and keeping myself busy. The moments in-between though (aka life) are insufferable. 

I feel like my whole life changed so drastically last month and now nothing feels like same. 

I’m not sleeping well, I feel sick all the time, I cry randomly every day (on the bus, at the gym etc).

Why can’t I get it together and move on?!",4.048169761273211,5.440471597701151,4.6851724137931035,85.31168435013265,71.52873563218391,8.572236958443856,28.90185676392573,9.057496981413335,2.26376976127321,694,27,142,14,13,222,115,174,0.099,0.78,0.121,0.7245,2,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,0,0,4,10,10,0,0,12,0,9,9,2,1,5,25,22,8,0,0,3,0,5,4,2,0,5,0,1,0,1,9,1,1,4,2,0,4,2,2,1,1,7,5,17,8,21,15,8,35,0,0,0,1,6,11,0,1,21,85,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367487359887448,0.09909873177903948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755404456462924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310908660261835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612023598875544,0.07991811008824155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13820349059882278,0.0,0.11209268088230212,0.10440789463377376,0.0,0.2227425045322328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506305815120394,0.2655852911151042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054062382254162,0.0,0.0,0.19148047752269245,0.0,0.0647430543907105,0.0,0.07042655801627204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092822098979942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459428398996726,0.11014573704070496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101129101641901,0.0,0.2624266490753713,0.0,0.0,0.17505663767993526,0.2421640942844407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184258460798313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19782342874777456,0.13170728568038942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11968265088862202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890452520768552,0.0,0.13003313215054346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341932198305124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15877257428330796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250785547171117,0.0,0.12400943416448836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12175071252780262,0.0,0.2890348557589234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070270413902525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114189088447438,0.11487502649753965,0.11181847193670112,0.1383521883166547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804303853674909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nannydanni,2020/01/30,"Why do “professionals” not understand mental health? I have noticed a lot of people who are supposed to be high professionals, like judges and health assessors do not understand mental health. 
My doctor is fab and so understanding and I have had a lot going on recently. 
I had a court hearing (I’m not in trouble I’m trying to get a employment case accepted against my ex employer for negligence, bullying and a string of other horrible things) and the judge had zero understanding of my mental health. Comments, sly smirks, and lack of knowledge. He never even asked what kind of mental health I had. All assuming it’s the same. 

Apparently I don’t have mental health because I can request medical records. Does this mean I shouldn’t have medical records at all because I’m too mentally unstable to contact a doctor? 
I don’t have mental health because I can look people in the eye. 
I don’t have mental health because SOME days I can act like a normal person and do normal things. 
I don’t have mental health because I could apply for a job but I would have been homeless because the government took my benefits off me and it took them a year to get me a tribunal which I won and they agreed I am mental and physically unstable to work at this time. 

I have had mental health since I was 9 years old, I have had it for 16 years. I have wore a mask of someone who is not broken for so long it is normal for me to act like I’m all fine. I have goals in life and want to over come my trauma so I can move on and earn my own money again. I have lost jobs because of my mental health attacking my physical health. 

Working on getting myself better is hard enough, but now, after having some woman who is barely trained to assess someone with health conditions take my money off me for one year, having to go 3 times to court because they messed up twice. Yes I got my money back but the stress for a tiny amount of money a month was unreal! If someone has mental health, how on Earth is it fair for their country to treat them so cruelly? With no regard for anything. Let me tell people something, if you think mental health is lying in bed everyday, crying, not eating, talking or bathing, you are WRONG! 

Mental health comes in many forms. Judges and health professionals that do not specialise in mental health, need to become more educated before they think they can judge me and my life. 

If this is “justice” and how society handles disgusting matters to someone as unstable as myself, I want no part of it. 

They can play like children and undermine my condition, but I will get the help I need, and when I make progress to get better, I will have no one to judge my life. 

Opinions please? Rant over. Sorry it’s so long.",4.757494736842105,6.125830588571433,5.3966340852130354,80.9788308270677,69.78095238095239,8.345363408521303,28.29197994987469,8.766177420268882,2.178619047619048,2149,76,401,37,38,694,233,525,0.134,0.741,0.125,-0.8708,5,0,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,2,8,9,13,22,2,1,19,1,58,27,1,3,4,70,93,35,0,14,14,1,1,4,0,4,25,1,2,3,19,21,1,0,10,2,4,9,15,8,0,4,15,4,60,14,56,71,15,46,0,1,2,0,26,18,0,10,23,278,79,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029170103560212067,0.0,0.03313843588334613,0.04032641551142722,0.0,0.027256781899267245,0.0,0.1728667366537997,0.03914875248299162,0.03016303731158502,0.0,0.0,0.06270050384025691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061069412017500574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028301780762945025,0.0,0.03893718918819378,0.022860572856528226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256361712621423,0.031020166815196974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03627143231197881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03662653149529388,0.0,0.023412604100699203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09259874327726192,0.0,0.040291029374639305,0.0,0.028350440061749093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03175381384931232,0.0,0.0,0.6782187077769767,0.039951677806164605,0.0,0.023759574707147648,0.037452013462381854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035194155442312,0.0,0.0,0.03691290306763214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03624726086522781,0.07511241848591639,0.06927103149101052,0.0,0.0,0.06273948140046759,0.029766800252759195,0.0,0.038694909935006135,0.06027204536977381,0.0,0.0,0.023661344730543418,0.035937993556211946,0.0,0.038612496092155744,0.0,0.07141884113291469,0.5715605786528729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028293692760147617,0.03767486489242088,0.0,0.0525674403279568,0.02733913923585466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419246906742816,0.0,0.04035698041194296,0.037195973328296064,0.0,0.048040009082963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038385966277234285,0.0,0.07372407357038804,0.03095121081349508,0.0,0.03891048539445388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03499992751553993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02932236880714605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013751242220487,0.027289059564442268,0.0,0.03968034474920075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04060475677062898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02665195444324514,0.028491193079943262,0.030982498318258892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04709921555863873,0.04542639079926213,0.0,0.0,0.041339205662254304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876649825759413,0.024066386549850282,0.0,0.0,0.14760753725128448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041815466112867884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031985670351715616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05161210601290068,0.0,0.0,0.02518074140490064,0.03875605257984284,0.0,0.09130758343106517
mentalhealth,wierdhairgrows,2020/01/30,"I have this cute thing.. Where I binge on junk food, feel depressed and then eat more food to make myself feel better",3.16,5.145793043478268,2.2341304347826103,99.52771739130438,75.08695652173913,4.6000000000000005,15.847826086956525,3.1291,-1.2317652173913043,92,1,20,0,2,26,20,23,0.121,0.662,0.217,0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,4,4,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,2,2,4,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751828914163039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26798914534123136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31837950281390226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3146490063560661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7524766971025219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076920234752036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20671123080424786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,roubikscubee,2020/01/30,"Scars from the old days So, I had a really bad self harm issue. I had to get 215 surgical staples to repair my worst episode (I almost died). The doctor didn’t take my condition seriously (wow) and he refused to use dermabond or any method that would’ve produced less scar tissue. I was taking up “too much time” in the ER apparently. 

Now I’m basically covered from head to toe in keloid purple scars (about 70 percent of my body). Work, social, and even family endeavors are increasingly complicated. The worst of my self harm was over 7 years ago, but the scars will never go back to skin color. 

I can’t ever find a good way to explain it. Eventually, I’ll cover them all with tattoos, but it’s going to be a long while. It’s really discouraging to know I’m in a better place now, but people just imagine etc etc etc about me. Idk. Suggestions?",3.7378683966635786,5.330682277108436,5.383975903614459,79.20555607043559,72.6144578313253,8.481186283595923,25.419833178869325,9.057496981413335,2.0112804448563484,662,21,128,14,13,225,118,166,0.127,0.8270000000000001,0.046,-0.8602,1,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,3,10,10,0,0,9,0,9,5,4,2,3,20,19,8,1,0,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,3,0,2,4,0,0,3,3,7,1,0,5,3,11,3,20,12,10,22,0,1,2,0,8,6,0,2,12,77,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358376342481934,0.0,0.15090123834746366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247910112403046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158766610690527,0.12582566784948518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327921577843366,0.0,0.16739035151388246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971870730202204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639965357442842,0.0,0.0,0.15424472519818785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5042008394960783,0.0995339215079374,0.13631402882165256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14206368317944754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773429228202388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873294235404922,0.0,0.17128911154012053,0.12639746114880346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465855809809906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572884750228153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281910871983872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336206836078404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077960577664006,0.0,0.11622678652456535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581311106507536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447429826599623,0.0,0.15744625007032315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19308066411283348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144195922948041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536165740612501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266107204629887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787260985343402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301537896134887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961623330487553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097091824269557,0.0,0.0,0.10705079741352648,0.0,0.0,0.09704390211377292
mentalhealth,Proxiproton,2020/01/30,"Help. Dont know what to do. Lost the will to live. I'm scared. I'm scared for my future.  I'm scared for my family and friends. I'm scared for my life. I'm an extremely depressed and have been doing quite a lot of drugs. 

I might not have a future honestly. On monday day I was exhausted. I did some sleeping and woke up that night. Monday night my dad calls and I lie to him about going to the gym and applying for a job. I then pop 1mg xanax and start smoking a joint and my thc cart. I was still exhausted at this point. I should have gone to bed. 

I then get an extreme urge to clean my room and I feel fantastic. This is.. weird. I feel more motivated to do this than I have felt about anything else in months and months. I start cleaning every inch of my room. Organizing, dusting, moving furniture, vacuuming. This all started at about 4am Tuesday morning. It took about 14 hours in total. I was up running around doing weird shit for a total of 30-something hours. Then I crashed and woke up at 3pm today fully clothed and on a perfectly made bed. 

It's like I was manic or something. I think I might be bipolar. I just honestly have no clue. I also took the other half of that xanax (dont remember doing it) so 2mg total. Normally my appetite is terrible and I eat little to nothing everyday (unless I smoke some weed). During cleaning I was intermittently vacuuming food down my throat. It's like it fixed my problems or something.

Guys, i don't wanna be addicted to xanax. I am very sad and anxious. I have ZERO good reason to be. But I am. Very. I dont know what to do. I feel like one night I'm gonna kill myself soon. I have no job and dont go to school right now. My parents want to help but all they do is get very angry with me. They blame themselves. I have begged to them to not blame themselves. I told them it isnt their fault! I still feel so so guilty about all this. Even though I accept full responsibility. 

Stay safe everyone ☮",0.4789826530612231,2.8299902350000044,2.461673469387758,91.95328571428574,87.9,5.56530612244898,19.913265306122447,7.043009809895983,0.4450979591836735,1514,47,328,23,49,504,198,400,0.14,0.775,0.085,-0.9531,3,0,5,0,0,1,56.0,0,0,5,4,17,26,2,4,11,0,40,14,3,3,7,55,71,27,1,5,8,2,5,3,1,5,9,0,9,1,16,16,2,1,12,1,0,7,10,16,0,3,16,5,52,10,45,47,11,52,0,3,0,0,14,19,1,7,28,214,68,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257745722794686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791205036949301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959376280883244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988352659824006,0.07559853736731373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671480277463069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054767630425875,0.0,0.07314314855149909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3981115578788182,0.0,0.0984824976370334,0.08689635261315498,0.07094138980887907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056090145104489376,0.0,0.07155040303796599,0.08114655965046509,0.0,0.0,0.08005685381317941,0.0,0.17175635217746602,0.06066825593631641,0.0815383867017461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268795545362563,0.0,0.0656104856280619,0.0,0.08873642461258496,0.0,0.09652619906408748,0.07122850008587349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408607898288223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384278205131974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16726202322922268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685438575392091,0.0,0.09395355217076848,0.0,0.09334176238901208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05998288263739615,0.1244657212571368,0.08511410073389235,0.07498763508189188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270233690044004,0.07219760253909599,0.0,0.08035519961964589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18017753141897644,0.0,0.0,0.13556777585549534,0.09025859018155144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390804835905087,0.08320547746633808,0.08148489854612807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057545309114160226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429577235730224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802786891554786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125883436147738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032494393019032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731390529136028,0.0,0.0,0.09620001145644813,0.07252287876979169,0.0,0.0,0.34008673497724856,0.08594554417472486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08717115827931651,0.0,0.0,0.08498327665836339,0.0,0.0,0.19613119123586625,0.0,0.0,0.18032457362544752,0.09051549632412503,0.13563755321470045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05441455466775181,0.08343538179828297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804960761349109,0.08114655965046509,0.18870281569870406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21020850017077966,0.05008916461822742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Formal-Purple,2020/01/30,"I feel like I'm going crazy. Please help. I'm a 26 year old male. I have sever anxiety, and bi polar depression, or at least that's what my doctor said. My doctor prescribed me some medication to take for my anxiety. I forgot what it's called. I forgot to take my daily pill yesterday. Today, when I was about to drive back home from work, I felt very lightheaded, and groggy. I assumed they were side effects from my medication, or a withdrawal, since I missed a dose yesterday. I had my mom come pick me up, because I didnt want to drive in that condition. My mom called my doctor, and told her what happened. She said the medication shouldn't be causing that, and it's probably my anxiety. That scares me, because in that case, than this will be happening all the time. What am I suppose to do? Not drive? I even feel a little lightheaded right now,   but I don't know if I actually am, or if my mind is playing tricks on me. I would feel guilty driving, even if I were a little lightheaded, as that's the equivalent to driving under the influence. My diet isnt the best either, which could contribute to the light headedness. I'm afraid I'll wake up tommarrow to go to work, than I'll still feel like this. I'm afraid I'll be to scared to ever drive again. What should I do?",3.0084802827380948,4.671377902343753,4.467410714285716,84.74604166666668,74.6640625,8.313690476190478,25.081101190476193,8.976282227363876,1.8667241815476188,997,33,206,22,21,332,134,256,0.11199999999999999,0.8390000000000001,0.049,-0.9209,0,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,1,4,9,11,1,4,11,0,21,11,1,4,2,36,45,13,0,8,9,2,5,2,0,4,8,2,1,1,16,5,1,2,8,1,0,10,5,7,0,0,11,8,35,4,25,26,5,33,0,2,0,1,12,11,0,8,14,133,51,5,0.0,0.0,0.1055443397281028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482163920679597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316504005007802,0.0,0.1318613944436892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350271100332635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22087807879090893,0.0,0.0,0.111105673784138,0.0,0.09316653952473178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635350788429381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315432666531816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3321057570249536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428716100754077,0.09783300245063664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21874704130787892,0.15453287542653696,0.10384641160517576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293472809755393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19128341708677807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07249447089518209,0.0,0.10848896314325523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05943953191309762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056788018767355,0.21680080501339868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3268663999899059,0.0,0.0,0.10920640269384756,0.253341244945518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349118993510153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11872245550325687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661011333406515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923643577480639,0.2057616336644972,0.0,0.216565402447136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218513043833695,0.0,0.08946749418995123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637326387002872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263921888335062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306644539413173,0.0,0.10251893608692796,0.10334738489038184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923976102809819,0.06379302088635097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747724289297518,0.0,0.0,0.0768306902542122,0.0,0.0,0.0696487103740273
mentalhealth,randomaccount7644798,2020/01/30,"I can’t trust what others say. What’s wrong with me? This is kind of a rant...

Whenever someone compliments me I don’t believe them; I feel like they are just saying it to be nice. 

I worry that my friends don’t actually like me, they are only trying to be nice. 

My grades are good but my parents tell me I’m a failure, so when others tell me I’m smart think they are lying.

I’ve never had the courage to ask another guy out.

No one has told me I’m beautiful, even if they did I would think they are lying.

People tell me being tall is beautiful, but people also tell me I’m too tall.

I’m jealous of my friends who have boyfriends. Are they better than me? The voice in my head tells me no, but can I trust that voice? No.

The only person I can trust is my volleyball coach, who had been nothing but brutally honest, always, all the time, no matter what.",1.2693390614672817,3.175139258426966,3.077799074686056,91.6455551883675,80.57303370786515,5.985988103106411,20.582947785855914,7.048011613610866,0.3931542630535359,660,18,145,8,17,220,97,178,0.179,0.585,0.23600000000000002,0.8916,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,7,1,6,19,2,0,6,0,24,1,1,0,2,15,34,8,0,2,6,1,1,2,2,1,0,4,0,2,11,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,8,3,0,1,5,5,30,16,9,25,1,7,0,0,0,0,23,4,0,1,5,98,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.13622602013907353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163524863353187,0.1161554479707606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14637907307015058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050385766070008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157277420962587,0.0,0.12346173575040842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220215352890247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705841709070719,0.09972774785571524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21570377675846752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170868980338135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13822245511364514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14326625438125082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536824443794666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639957035895994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766540545128994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394658031354972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459418255966116,0.2123388156076442,0.0,0.0,0.15500536259654893,0.0,0.0,0.19355723441033248,0.121890255311073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220254358683592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11827963815227367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6100673496981391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17889556585516286,0.0,0.0,0.08139982572720768,0.0,0.0,0.13339041176122018,0.0,0.0947768414829575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176699401060247,0.0,0.09916532885450803,0.15262682847117248,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1epicgamerboi,2020/01/30,"I need you advice/help I am 14 and I have been thinking that my mother might a toxic person. Almost every other day she makes me feel like im a terrible person and that everything I do is a mistake. Often times when I try to talk to her about something she ignores me and gets mad If I ask her if she heard me. She always plays victim. I often have to work up the nerve to talk to her in fear of her getting mad at me at. She is also very childish as she calls us name and makes fun of me and my siblings sometimes.  She is also very irresponsible with money as she doesn't even have a single dollar in her bank at times and she has a very unstable job working for doordash. Just this day we went to the store and I put a funko bobblehead in the cart, I thought it was 5 dollars but it was actually 15 and when she got home she got mad at me and said I knew it was 5 dollars the whole time, I apologized and gave her 15 dollars in cash but she said forgot it and walked away. I live in fear of her being mad at me. I always thought that she was just stressed as she is a single mother of 3 but now I see that she is toxic. What do I do? I want to cut her out of my life but I live with her by law. Should I run away, should I confront her. What do I do?",0.6209489051094899,2.1864017080291984,2.853013138686133,94.12884817518247,81.18978102189782,5.551883211678833,19.719124087591236,6.360717304075467,-0.08635661313868638,964,24,230,8,25,329,130,274,0.14800000000000002,0.816,0.036000000000000004,-0.9802,1,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,2,1,0,2,11,16,7,3,11,0,25,1,0,2,0,43,46,24,0,7,8,2,1,1,0,3,1,3,1,2,12,15,0,2,5,1,8,4,1,13,0,0,16,5,58,3,34,26,3,26,0,0,1,0,42,14,0,6,9,170,70,3,0.0,0.0,0.1173668079871894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204336858267632,0.0,0.0,0.1923607953546281,0.20014963579986364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243682512352557,0.0,0.2259964749482547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280978368340345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15512924276458262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943763194567663,0.0,0.1013332123050586,0.0,0.10809150773654196,0.0,0.0,0.27067584350497,0.06081245583867065,0.08592137846813097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256729043117703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19238285612628056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080614883447153,0.0,0.12064127113557895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991294368745662,0.0,0.11935006494423055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495071897413968,0.05875816590513243,0.0,0.21240237995516467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16056318946498996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758815652088282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917916518679445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100313901264868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090522514899045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22880986523431016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584013887313014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925902245004464,0.11895075103787273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13776962655310168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19333799007092511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706457806683044,0.0,0.19096292809207435,0.210392354703511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165587855100212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14467078691247698,0.0,0.0,0.29770765323055964,0.07093874718984615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149210018510336,0.0,0.1342778888582813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511693546603838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Subject-Smell,2020/01/30,"to those of you who are depressed hello there, If you're going threw and uncomfortable time, just know that you're not alone, my perspective of the world is damaged dramatically but when I seek others that aren't here to verbally antagonize my emotions, than I feel happy again temporarily, the only thing that truly matters at the end of the scenario of our lives will always be love and others that are there for you, if you're going threw something that makes you feel endlessly tormented by existing, I'm here for you, and I love you.",24.05900990099009,8.87920366336634,20.34460396039604,39.147797029702986,51.97029702970297,23.764356435643567,65.35148514851485,15.247664890283005,8.726124752475247,434,15,77,9,2,139,64,101,0.085,0.716,0.19899999999999998,0.9444,0,1,1,0,0,0,9.0,1,5,0,0,7,5,0,0,4,0,6,2,0,1,0,13,17,7,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,0,3,0,0,4,2,2,0,0,2,2,11,3,11,13,0,10,0,2,0,2,10,2,0,2,4,56,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697408190115584,0.0,0.0,0.21670977427842786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22431952064415128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929637727001577,0.23067555061154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633760191558472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29603197472983617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772468445187707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313288264068255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299762956466792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.470120677667368,0.0,0.17384799331424078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19807894336761847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20050205509186714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17302702371295356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186664222660504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,siriusmoz1,2020/01/30,"I need help my phobia is taking over my life.  I've been so scared of being judged or called weird.... because well I know it's weird.  It's extreme but I really can't help it. 
 I've been fighting with a phobia for as long as I can remember and it's affecting my everyday life. 
When I used to get sick I spent every night doing a ritual before bed because I couldn't sleep unless it was completed.  It involved washing my hands and getting into bed without touching anything. I'd sometimes repeat parts of it 20x a night if it wasn't done correctly.  

I've got better as I've older.  In the sense that I don't have those rituals anymore. The closest I get is sanitizing everything when someone in my family is sick. but I still panic. 

It's my bodies fight or flight reaction. For a long time I relied on other people for reassurance but that doesn't always work.  If I don't believe the person it won't work. 

My phobia is vomiting or choking I'm not sure which. 

It isn't like a fear of spiders where you can gradually get conditioned to it. You're either sick or you're not. 
It terrifies me and I know it's irrational but this phobia is really bad right now. 


I'm currently Ill with a fever I feel sick so I keep panicking and I really can't control it. I feel so pathetic. I hate putting this burden on other people but I really need help.  

It stresses me out so much.  

I just sit in tears when I'm alone and have full blown panic attacks.  
Heat palpitations I pass out. I've even convulsed from this phobia.  

Please please help! 

I'm 23 and I don't want to pass this on to my daughter.",0.8892388663967629,3.2641124769230814,3.2852186234817813,86.74238663967613,85.76923076923076,6.4979757085020236,21.47570850202429,7.7627490962704995,1.1941384615384618,1245,42,251,25,38,428,161,325,0.29100000000000004,0.616,0.09300000000000001,-0.9975,1,1,0,0,3,0,31.0,0,1,0,4,13,18,4,5,9,0,25,13,3,3,2,43,46,28,0,6,17,1,4,1,0,1,10,0,2,1,26,11,0,2,5,0,1,3,13,13,1,0,7,4,33,5,28,36,4,32,2,0,0,0,12,14,0,6,15,157,59,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337070327157922,0.0,0.0,0.09108202312797824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855792797951344,0.0,0.0,0.09007875995672056,0.0,0.0,0.12453001736077543,0.0,0.0,0.09139707108954748,0.13345531361756027,0.0,0.09314498976486046,0.12332736814229445,0.0,0.09681116871823127,0.0,0.12158876736755785,0.0,0.0,0.11177400861202444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476992105167635,0.0,0.12277211385897947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201870075948436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229930947606422,0.0,0.0922273373110776,0.0,0.09837832747737092,0.0,0.10319201775528697,0.12317635922633785,0.11069561005258108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287596943424997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754759748172539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080720956662366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934830892596753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729578475902248,0.0,0.0,0.12031605469076052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546339731155532,0.05347811505668002,0.0,0.0,0.1937427021202104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08046793374902833,0.16233092313391936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20544730677848064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568625985711924,0.0,0.1185378116624218,0.0,0.15177578675076214,0.0955789095326204,0.0,0.2403151066235715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004059507083318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28049932077527034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400029251010053,0.09348084314106342,0.0,0.0,0.10959160497365313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954209884761422,0.0,0.0927476836081436,0.0,0.10826175140239036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741732989081588,0.0,0.1253895492929104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316762536117584,0.0,0.08230258770644823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638287823689961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454092607009122,0.0,0.0,0.06456414058805666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842042428784273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551847009302558,0.0,0.15938080229301368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway21360,2020/01/30,"Are suicidal impulses and anger whilst young normal? (vent/advice) I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this but recently I've been suicidal and I don't really want to live anymore. Also I apologize if this post is muddled and has awful grammar because I'm just scribbling my feelings out

The only reason I haven't killed myself already is because it would probably make my parents sad, but I'm scared of my own impulses. Sometimes I just have a strong impulse and I just forget the consequences of killing myself and want to do it anyway with no note, not telling anyone, just going through with it

It scares me that I have urges to commit suicide and I am afraid that one day the impulses will override my logic and I will do it. If I fail my midterm I don't know if I'll be able to resist committing suicide and it really scares me because I know what effect it will have on my parents. Is this a normal reaction to stress and/or bad grades in school? I feel as though I will never have a future and it's hopeless but I am an adolescent so this could definitely be normal. I don't want to overreact or be one of those people who pretend to have depression or anxiety or be suicidal for attention

I first had these impulses in 6th grade where I mentally said goodbye to everyone I knew at school on a Friday. I went home and I took a knife from my kitchen and was too nervous at first so I just did a small cut on my wrist veins to test it out. I hate veins and they make me uncomfortable so that's probably why I was hesitant. The skin then began to turn red and I was terrified and snapped out of it and stopped. I hate myself for days after that for not doing it but I felt oddly satisfied and I wasn't suicidal for a while anymore. I only told one person and she never let on that it was weird or I should be worried and she's never spoken about it since.

I feel as though I at this point am kind of unstable. Just this morning I was sent into a wave of anger I hadn't felt in a long time over something small and then tidal waves of sadness and guilt. I am semi-afraid I will hurt someone so I want to hurt myself but I have no way to and it distresses me. I want to hurt myself harder than I want to hurt anyone else. I cannot cut myself because I will be discovered and I don't know what to do about my anger. Is this normal or something you have experienced?

I don't want to tell my parents or anyone I know really about any of this and even now it's hard to write this but I can't burden my parents with my suicide

I am really sorry about the very messy post with barely any commas, so I'm sorry that it's hard to understand, I am just in need of help? Is it normal to feel this way? What can I do to stop my suicidal urges and how do I get my anger out in other ways than hurting myself? I hate being alive and really want to die but I just hate my parents being sad over my death a little more",2.5100658978583184,4.070584555189459,4.132738385502473,87.05556886326195,75.77100494233937,7.360118616144978,24.166359143327842,8.109356740369918,1.3186136013179577,2303,73,484,38,50,771,240,607,0.342,0.61,0.048,-0.9997,5,0,2,0,0,14,32.0,0,1,1,5,26,37,12,8,17,1,64,5,4,5,6,108,104,56,12,21,28,5,9,0,0,8,0,1,2,1,41,34,1,2,16,1,0,4,18,34,0,5,19,12,82,3,69,67,2,57,0,11,1,0,19,26,0,10,21,355,123,7,0.053373958082785285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052156414111520784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058899489971898984,0.04268313499532347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259224353460902,0.0,0.040830931842383136,0.0,0.10586524881550707,0.1119609374934664,0.054687927498366304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044565025567407206,0.13014507779239096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042614762450607205,0.0,0.0,0.06884357489202572,0.0,0.045970911887076055,0.0,0.05539374182869915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044587093181455005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035252995931892295,0.0,0.0,0.05100110423882535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079499076586315,0.0,0.1024947398276439,0.0,0.0,0.09079972295823607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02788569016937475,0.0,0.030333650381793576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956251654567927,0.21078293424831268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035775439028140954,0.0,0.05353843180357224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856896301703979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810075321762124,0.05558076393726353,0.11733172605082555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05457848833594523,0.0,0.0,0.05349472784085239,0.047130182843341833,0.04723427332275405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125506295167205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05378839605853048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03957611361941811,0.1234958606207635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26147573278404657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850272597736277,0.0811866004892458,0.0,0.0,0.2963273203442429,0.0,0.0,0.03700278212654128,0.046604081468353084,0.05576442612861561,0.0,0.0504556423761011,0.0,0.15335249375572166,0.0,0.11509230836871193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709636213306933,0.05487731832926901,0.052700344524469464,0.0,0.0,0.04558106857234631,0.05077085665014568,0.0,0.1603099296094158,0.10803459015880996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04415148967734411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04522358147850336,0.08217976109558182,0.05278820931244897,0.11949555256673752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924603776969249,0.061139688652050064,0.0,0.0,0.4670595775889957,0.0,0.050304323838177095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330238383357127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487928564389927,0.0,0.031122784180073068,0.0,0.0,0.05100110423882535,0.05930043131258179,0.0,0.058055539676180976,0.0,0.055564172697909864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04403910519138327,0.2518507467903731,0.12709729071858533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04947819387354597,0.048161695381600214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05420384526664817,0.0,0.03791532844834136,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Voxi3,2020/01/30,"I’m scared of myself I’m scared of what I might/can do to myself and others. I’m scared that I might hurt/kill someone with out being able to control my self. I’m afraid I might kill my self because something might make me snap and I’d do it without thinking. This shit is fucking me up and I can’t stop it. I can’t go a single day without some kind of homicidal or suicidal thoughts. I don’t want to hurt people or my self but I feel like I will. For example I’ll be sitting front seat of a car and have an impulse to grab the wheel and drive of the bridge or something like that. But I don’t want to, that’s the hard part I know I’m not going to, I know I have self control but there’s always that possibility I might not.  I’ve broken down crying just randomly because I’ll think of something like that and freak out that I’ll do it. I just don’t know what to do anymore.",1.422968749999999,2.772431192708336,3.1639583333333365,93.751875,78.21875,5.841666666666668,22.9375,6.322622252153567,0.2948374999999994,687,21,162,5,16,229,91,192,0.136,0.767,0.09699999999999999,-0.7357,0,0,3,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,3,13,3,4,6,0,19,2,1,3,0,40,37,12,2,2,12,0,3,3,0,5,0,0,0,4,13,9,0,3,7,0,0,5,9,9,0,0,1,3,21,4,21,29,3,12,0,1,0,1,4,4,2,9,5,100,34,0,0.09969581351793698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295490331202933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887145794556387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154728515489666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223634664334913,0.0,0.0,0.1095111697947014,0.06429555209019792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050409198838696205,0.07122270909737963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921671731203961,0.0,0.0,0.11331885662633535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930786665863825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134528606576224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029864649394794,0.10381784817380996,0.16437063551607148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14611901596442753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654772967390211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5288075167188042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796085075382113,0.0,0.0691165242197455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239205017023413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994387042202266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160179053928983,0.0,0.10233631990882576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447193926860483,0.23025212382861165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833501641840173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090510387033138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776210352356004,0.0,0.07914733980280783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760634768467937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19220641315577885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MysteriousDirt2,2020/01/30,"Did my antidepressant change me? Okay I’m frustrated- sometimes I feel like I’ve changed because of my antidepressant. I’m a 26 YO female and I’ve taken 30mg of Aventyl (Nortryptyline) for 8 years now. It isn’t a high dose by any means but wow it works for me, it takes the edge off. I don’t experience anxiety or depression like I used to and I haven’t had a panic attack in years. 

Before taking it I was HIGHLY motivated and ambitious and driven. I was always anxious though, my resting heart rate was always over 100bpm. I rarely required sleep I could go 4-5 hours a night and be up the next morning wide awake at 6am grinding. The downside was I experienced panick attacks really badly, and struggled with appetite due to my anxiety. I was becoming underweight and that was when my dr prescribed me this medication. 

Fast forward to now. I’m a healthy weight but my cardio is terrible. I don’t suffer from anxiety attacks and my heart rate is in the normal range. I honestly can’t imagine going off of my pills BUT I’m considering it. BECAUSE I’m not the same motivated driven person I once was, I’m lazy and have a nonchalant attitude towards many things. I’m often tired and without 8 hours of sleep I’m almost useless. I have really bad memory now and I’m generally not as ‘sharp’. I find I make silly mistakes and am not ‘on the ball’ anymore. This impacts my work and of course my personal life. I generally feel like a bit of a hot mess. 

Antidepressants?",1.9698863636363624,4.573384625000003,4.079608585858587,81.3580681818182,82.95833333333334,7.240909090909091,26.08838383838384,8.296473431620573,2.1861444444444444,1164,50,217,27,33,397,161,288,0.17600000000000002,0.733,0.091,-0.9651,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,8,6,21,4,2,14,1,21,12,4,4,0,40,42,20,0,3,8,0,5,3,0,0,7,1,0,2,9,14,1,1,7,1,0,5,9,14,0,0,12,7,30,7,25,28,3,29,0,3,0,0,2,13,0,3,16,127,39,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480725916127773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741799614145002,0.0,0.0,0.07117604751122028,0.0,0.2402061875953985,0.1182420875548127,0.1037999325077654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3572159391162676,0.0,0.0,0.17478244080511213,0.12760608832659034,0.11559468904015192,0.0890625293884902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426748683600227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221444187757018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356678920986099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901481384040342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238282532649468,0.0,0.0,0.10584392191542394,0.1495459367333,0.0,0.0,0.09566226112312007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189674949078518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480579584270001,0.0,0.2211694409415718,0.0,0.0,0.2061486320785095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739282531987489,0.15340265340842166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986495387272669,0.1061142674127901,0.0,0.11401128249938415,0.0,0.10543935896749186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131281900533403,0.09822136887843376,0.10254984981030686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146521376397718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280227198372196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827795453230109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341026450433068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094819361196192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351673708125032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094189804393406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15739067994658054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953502769853631,0.0,0.10283320440942234,0.0,0.0,0.12029745738087502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039728307221412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274542357909556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008936913022666,0.0,0.15239528635965105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348021462281236
mentalhealth,cvltbaby,2020/01/30,"Are people with ptsd more likely to develop ptsd from other events? OK I have PTSD from a certain event but went unchecked and unresolved for a long... Long... Time and ended up causing me more problems that gave me even more trauma as a result. But anyway, am I more likely to get ptsd from other events because I already had it before? Or are the chances just the same as before?",3.8804566210045657,5.770044191780817,4.1878767123287695,86.70775114155255,72.83561643835617,5.962557077625571,24.495433789954337,6.42735559955562,0.8247461187214609,298,9,55,2,6,93,49,73,0.113,0.812,0.075,-0.7143,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,5,1,5,0,0,2,1,13,8,7,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,3,0,5,4,10,5,5,9,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,9,42,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18500159631296856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219548231807687,0.0,0.2853088991813579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221868415010247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14848464942964187,0.0,0.0,0.11072864171364216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758814716535744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16380679385582442,0.0,0.0,0.2967229756849057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162246695972605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041463860217506,0.7838770925624932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775576592878067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15540957746248246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yakult-bae,2020/01/30,"some times i want to kill my self but i’m not depressed. I’m 16, have a great loving family, and ever since i was young i’ve always been interested in making money some reason, i would make small things and sell them and so on. I know it’s kind of early but i have no idea what i want to do in college and nothing really interests me. 
Dying just sounds like an easy way out because obviously if you’re dead you don’t have to work, pay for taxes, rent... etc. I know it’s going to be harsh on my family if i did (i’m not going to do it) but i just think about it some times, am i the only one that does this?",0.10339839265212447,1.7766282835820917,2.871791044776121,92.83239380022964,83.32835820895522,5.914121699196326,15.531572904707234,7.010146845296331,-0.3407329506314585,466,7,112,6,13,164,88,134,0.131,0.6809999999999999,0.187,0.8526,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,1,5,8,1,0,3,0,12,1,0,3,2,29,25,10,3,5,9,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,8,5,0,0,5,0,5,2,4,2,0,1,3,1,15,6,13,20,4,14,0,1,0,1,4,6,0,5,6,72,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15225639932680218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154465406355928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15760287059369882,0.0,0.18990732110283814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160129535311338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20407426005142554,0.0,0.1655184743100203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449999137724728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20798675421099574,0.0,0.0,0.20173925093229164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20656537802874533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20244342522611405,0.19054849222527828,0.201125190672172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939618337060626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16514917674812712,0.0,0.2442849620452136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755769908081554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399392267353405,0.1391667117924421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722350670353494,0.1881368575072462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908910317583836,0.0,0.0,0.15136531403227896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156568251010336,0.11724802920778385,0.0,0.0,0.21339755625020096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21585606542258096,0.14524327841001755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321370258132215,0.0,0.0,0.1299857748665077,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MagnanimousLion,2020/01/30,"Am I paranoid/self conscious or am I justified in my thoughts? How do I better myself?  I thought I would vent here because I just don't want to talk to the people in my life about this.

I always feel like strangers are rude/ judgmental of me for no reason, and it makes me over analyze myself like crazy. My instincts tell me that this is justified, but people I have mentioned to this in the past think it's strange or even malicious of me to feel this way. I act as polite as possible at all times, and I always dress my best, but shit, I really think that I give off some kind of negative vibe that turns people hostile. People are rude to me and I always go into loops in my mind about what I did wrong. Is it my energy or do they just not like how I look? Here are some examples.

Yesterday I was smoking a cigarette and a girl who was walking by asked if she could have one. Her friend (who was a guy) walked up to us and we introduced ourselves chatted for a minute. I finished my cigarette and said it was nice to meet them, and turned around to go to class. I immediately hear whispering and casually glance behind my shoulder, and I thought I heard the word ""weird"" and saw that they were looking at me, and not in a friendly way: they were glaring. WTF? Just to clarify, I said nothing weird to them and literally just shot the breeze with them.

The next one is a much better example.

Last week, I went to see my English teacher during her office hours and I saw a girl exiting her office that I had had a conversation with earlier. I wanted to be friendly, so I smiled and said ""Hey"". She looked pissed off and didn't return my smile and said ""Uh . . . hey?"". Don't know what I did wrong. Maybe she thought that I was stalking her or something?

Today in the same class, I noticed a different girl staring at me in the beginning of class. I just raised my eyebrows and went back to what I was doing, but she's friends with the other girl, and I honestly think that they were gossiping about me or something. Later that day, I volunteered to read a section out loud, and I heard what sounded like a scoff, followed by a sigh from another person. I'm a little shy by nature, and was hesitant to even volunteer because I didn't want people to think I was a teacher's pet, and then when I did go out of my comfort zone i got heckled?

These are just a few examples. I dread being around other people as a result of things like this. I'm not dangerous or crazy, and I know how ridiculous I sound. I want to know these feelings could mean and what I'm doing wrong, and how I can better myself. I would appreciate any advice. Thanks",4.280009523809524,5.163371281904767,5.134071428571428,84.22834523809523,70.46666666666667,8.423809523809524,28.48809523809524,8.680891452615391,1.9976952380952384,2053,73,421,34,36,669,235,525,0.14300000000000002,0.721,0.136,-0.7219,2,0,4,0,0,0,66.0,2,0,7,4,22,34,7,1,24,0,42,4,3,7,1,89,91,44,0,9,19,0,3,5,4,2,1,11,1,6,29,33,0,0,17,3,0,9,9,14,2,2,33,22,84,19,59,52,8,49,0,0,8,0,47,22,2,9,21,305,113,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481778308655335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911229831572241,0.0,0.0,0.05206637403144383,0.08028438213820405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631698337069467,0.07157731880103,0.0,0.0,0.05887324840441435,0.0,0.0933458172491855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034954706267851,0.2031447999608834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226078451241755,0.0,0.0,0.049377662756503925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999343530626858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114004375929132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613968645564335,0.05469757698761785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366136644905706,0.0,0.0,0.07344748777749223,0.13053982984541904,0.0,0.061235493841431274,0.0,0.0,0.07581073013836122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629357127881222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540044831920563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972997398079477,0.12623327032325385,0.06241015280392195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05407965484358423,0.18702733595220886,0.07673757891624346,0.0,0.0,0.19288427723733467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051107288859409065,0.0,0.07691916652984516,0.08340100758589833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730815339325217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05628359661782705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142704001528743,0.0,0.0,0.07346554541197985,0.08716900408218316,0.0,0.0,0.10376395124501606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730893222152677,0.31848042169728474,0.06685302503335064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631478491750838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765850554680065,0.0,0.04904907422915041,0.07872088925346693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29132086664140755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06101186303082196,0.0,0.07987330058360828,0.0,0.07859219071812068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788593300542642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061539513128610536,0.06692060443603734,0.07049015391149106,0.0,0.0,0.05086594278599228,0.19623734008840266,0.0,0.2431341220851431,0.04464528007725846,0.0,0.07257403816276195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16656002328602754,0.0,0.0,0.09209746917572467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18063851651360374,0.12154641239380835,0.0614152921068425,0.0,0.0,0.14195181320671724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087782152138724,0.25113324666940645,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheLoriShow,2020/01/30,"Bell Let’s Talk PSA... Lori’s Story of Managing Mental Illness - January... BELL LETS TALK DAY PSA - By Lori Spensieri  Hello I’m Lori  

I have depression  And  Generalized anxiety And  Social anxiety 

 I have felt lonely  For a long time  I have felt like a failure  For a long time  

But the worst  Was when I had a terrible thought The thought was... 

The world would be better without me in it 

This was terrifying  And I cried for hours  These are my children  

But that thought was powerful And so scary  

Right then and there I decided 

To never let that happen again  I got help I spoke with my doctor  

I got on a treatment plan I am coping very well And i am here  

To tell you  

That there is always a solution  No matter what the problem Suicide ... is never the answer  

You are one of a kind  

You are special And the world needs you  

Bell let’s talk day  

Wednesday January 29 

Support a fiend Send a text or tweet Use [\#bellletsfalk](https://www.youtube.com/results?search_query=%23bellletsfalk)  

You are always worth more ... alive   

WEBSITE:  [http://letstalk.bell.ca/en/](https://www.youtube.com/redirect?q=http%3A%2F%2Fletstalk.bell.ca%2Fen%2F&redir_token=jfmbLEYBWOZe2sPH9lD8GW8PzTZ8MTU4MDQzMTA5NEAxNTgwMzQ0Njk0&event=video_description&v=c6xYfYT9Vko) For every tweet, text, post, image etc using any of the major social media platforms, Bell will donate $0.05 to mental health research. Lets get started and get talking.   Please get help if you feel alone.  Please text someone, call someone or knock on your neighbours door.   Thank you so much for watching my videos.  I am grateful for every single one of you.  Without you I am just talking to myself. Have a wonderful day and EH! Be Positive.",5.6766262626262645,9.386582511111117,4.02244107744108,77.15325757575762,86.85185185185185,4.973063973063974,22.062289562289568,6.680037744263671,0.9642592592592591,1378,43,204,17,44,394,152,270,0.145,0.687,0.168,0.6162,1,3,0,0,0,1,84.0,0,10,0,3,9,12,0,0,17,0,28,3,0,2,2,36,49,18,1,4,8,0,3,1,1,2,3,1,1,1,7,10,0,0,9,1,2,1,5,5,1,2,13,5,28,7,21,27,6,24,0,2,1,0,26,7,0,4,16,135,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896681334021198,0.0,0.0,0.14295187586274968,0.2792188448361059,0.0,0.058415155369176124,0.0,0.13142700163572776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597184217840015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771381912178823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435745522595616,0.16619577771707406,0.0,0.07398580976674086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792260557030979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580155060358933,0.0,0.0,0.14474942937883944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04343377695001791,0.0,0.16495553409092886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346380972268023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740464756371054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759613590411119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130801096545392,0.0,0.0,0.11515433205934718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459450048916324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945195251844858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43919442639060996,0.0,0.04196655169931148,0.0,0.0,0.15203813964412527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313461382798198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314661050106604,0.06369399025074306,0.13250322687111266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641654419869238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885854865220032,0.0,0.0,0.08226875042299554,0.0,0.0,0.08219499406294226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335839403495636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512909349600572,0.14556610512570228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06080068042247992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396099522160163,0.0974786520244432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3452170702899581,0.07508065576391926,0.07908546291796965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20458574917145075,0.10017832125734133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14838057240484867,0.0,0.07087675065029936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723469347725251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16560966390448995,0.0931552202140566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102111449764641,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cicada37,2020/01/30,"There was this girl,my soulmate.The one who got away. A friend of mine backstabbed me and told her things i said and made them sound worse than they were and now shes blocked me on all social media and texting applications.She knows too much,i told her my deepest secrets and shes threatened to use them against me.What do i do?I have alot of mental issues and this makes me feel very,you know.When i found out i pounded my head against the wall and punched my leg until i couldnt feel anything anymore.",2.845784313725492,4.819729656862744,2.596666666666668,96.63166666666667,75.9607843137255,4.925490196078432,25.058823529411764,5.033348758259628,0.20071764705882345,403,14,87,1,9,119,74,102,0.08800000000000001,0.878,0.034,-0.6124,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,7,2,2,3,1,20,18,8,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,4,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,8,4,19,1,10,9,2,6,0,0,0,0,14,4,0,1,2,53,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21885661427036196,0.0,0.0,0.18160195932922485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20733740589629815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22316625677741425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419657251300492,0.17049787442893666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764990464443163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264827460740297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23033400923321745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24256141271374296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088140425012005,0.14730652411162287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223949101355895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16222619448823294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495394035480828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099185127202792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22495685957325712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661089239300806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4217410008533084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19059784370229926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22489316328710254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PuddyTat0916,2020/01/31,"I have lost all hope and strength. I’m sure this is the same for a lot of countries but England and especially my city have the worst mental health services due to constant cuts and I hate being political so I’ll leave it at just bloody rubbish. 

I am a positive person and I put on such a good front that it’s very hard to suss quite how down I am though I speak of my depression freely because I think it’s important to break stigma. 

Unfortunately, I have suffered for my whole life and after 6 years of medication, constant GP appointments and being bounced around various services, something finally switched a couple of weeks ago. 
I really never thought it would happen but I have literally lost all hope. I’m so exhausted and the thought of living another year or even another week like this just for the hope that maybe I’ll feel a bit better in the very distant future makes me feel even worse. 
I just don’t want to get better anymore if it means coming off my third lot of antidepressants because it seems I’m part of the percentage they don’t work on. 
I don’t want to sit on another year long waiting list to be bounced to another service because they can’t help me. 
I’m so tired of being told that I will get better when no one understands how bad it is in my head. 

And then today happened. 
Today I asked for a phone appointment to discuss the night terrors I have been having for the last 6 months and to ask if it meant I was losing my mind. Our chat quickly moved onto my current mood and I told my GP that I had a plan and that I had really lost all hope for the first time in my 27 years of life. He told me he was incredibly worried and the mental health response team in my city advised him to tell me to give them a call because they’d assess me straight away and get me immediate help and that they would be better equipped than sending me to A&E. I tried to refuse to call them but I humoured him and they gave me an appointment for 6 hours later so I sat at work and I did my job knowing full well that I was safer there than leaving and being by myself. 

I got a call one hour before my appointment was due by a man who told me that they didn’t need to see me today because I’ve got a medical review booked next Thursday now and so they wouldn’t be much help for me today until they could assess my medication. I burst into tears on the phone and told him that my doctor had told me to call them because of how suicidal I am and that I was at serious risk of either harming myself or worse before then. I tried to be honest and explain how desperate I was and he raised his voice at me down the phone and told me I was guilt tripping him into getting an appointment sooner. I tried to explain to him that I didn’t care about my medication or any review, I just needed a safe space and for someone to give me some hope which he took for me saying that I didn’t want their services and when I tried to honestly state that I wasn’t sure if I’d make it by tomorrow, he threatened to cancel my appointment for next week and almost tricked me into telling him I’d be there and then said I couldn’t be that bad then. He told me they’d provide me a safe space over the phone for up to an hour if I needed but they couldn’t do anything for me in terms of keeping me alive. 

I don’t know what to do anymore, I really don’t. 
The only reason I am here and writing this post is because my boyfriend is here and when he’s not, I’m passed around my family because no one will even leave me alone long enough to go to the toilet. 
I feel like this is my last plea for something. 
I wish someone would say an exact date and time that I would get to and I would never be sad again because then I really think I’d stay. 

Sorry for such a long post, no one else gets it like you guys do 🧡",6.625969765093018,5.1615959771283375,6.9887674714104175,80.89843677711535,65.72172808132147,10.054005799367935,32.37770827224448,8.841846274778883,2.368336812954093,3002,96,643,39,39,981,305,787,0.147,0.713,0.14,-0.8017,2,1,2,0,0,0,33.0,1,1,14,15,33,43,3,3,33,0,64,12,1,7,8,117,134,61,1,25,17,0,4,3,0,8,11,5,0,3,32,37,0,5,16,3,0,9,19,19,1,6,36,10,113,23,87,74,17,98,0,7,1,0,73,29,0,17,57,431,145,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04196190397737527,0.0,0.047401743380040204,0.04902745134754634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05129024264426784,0.0,0.0321911742176245,0.19855029895528895,0.0,0.0,0.09389230866207884,0.0,0.0,0.03895479073324712,0.08428095564820663,0.08850848488749699,0.0,0.04447520989144324,0.0,0.07904979552639596,0.2597089166768472,0.0,0.08056157935308866,0.0,0.0,0.16746495266461156,0.051680371484072576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19334782659040026,0.0,0.04826381251104784,0.0,0.0,0.04077712923496536,0.0,0.10231020300564936,0.0,0.03779520167705388,0.05237812626970546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04077178391089111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04845201379152375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03954446961753918,0.0,0.0,0.048912369019833715,0.0,0.09379806534253562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04462565269470959,0.0,0.07180590063782906,0.03381797297862471,0.0,0.05185599947831012,0.0,0.04026531704130447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483915746441534,0.09082103061235712,0.02690303471971589,0.039704511923674926,0.0757203660604949,0.0,0.0,0.04687164156995988,0.08372092232729934,0.0,0.04240516907761888,0.04673605490133767,0.048582008754710464,0.1006352570622342,0.0,0.0,0.09518813589921576,0.0,0.0,0.23508446485672546,0.1398539275923858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04697523879668841,0.04207581161569933,0.0,0.0,0.05203098637881297,0.07717288323731981,0.0,0.15037097049004264,0.0,0.0,0.06687185820343344,0.06938024397235468,0.0,0.04179994591557668,0.12567679252266756,0.0,0.052958637848502216,0.15502366481304158,0.08048942677210179,0.0,0.0,0.06319639767770763,0.0,0.04755695660583823,0.05156449656935377,0.0,0.19075050625041298,0.09541028319816164,0.0,0.0477974562396468,0.0,0.03778440067129905,0.050312350614669696,0.03479856429458236,0.10530063596437528,0.07301931208859112,0.0,0.10068809591290492,0.044423107323580784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283086634771282,0.036002358836588144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051261980621239565,0.0,0.0,0.041333344521439566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906726229108126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04758733751670032,0.0,0.050349337820645344,0.0,0.0,0.12130265055678525,0.04867091107581792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04502887394088257,0.07528947912898494,0.0,0.0,0.03772191839172268,0.04309435032872765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021794722051108,0.07288555575030231,0.0,0.052990539534340235,0.0,0.05045555639590588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051779623759008415,0.0,0.08923020828265309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275025392965604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606640131975964,0.04650892700916645,0.07516149365005996,0.05520584122465397,0.05440757872758442,0.17948194393280384,0.3618646515170492,0.05259378750715938,0.12855642419228147,0.0,0.0,0.04928008493700359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811691379551991,0.08376278447954089,0.0,0.1139140417178101,0.0,0.04256216486386327,0.0,0.0,0.05285071187167266,0.0544358749730654,0.0,0.0,0.06892463665357294,0.04807360514796438,0.09648206600353808,0.1681362751954495,0.0,0.0,0.1219353848906866
mentalhealth,Edgy-bean,2020/01/31,"Somethings been done  I’ve been in and out of therapists ever since I was little but for once a lady actually looked into it. I’ve had issues with telling people what I think in fears of being taken away or ignored but for once this lady could see I was holding stuff back. She told me that I could tell her anything and she was so nice about it. I kinda broke down and told her what’s happening and she was really supportive she told my she thinks I should see a psychiatrist and talk to them as she thinks that there might be something up. My mum was super happy and it nice to finally know that I’m getting help.

-stay strong it might take awhile but everything will be ok-",2.903504901960788,4.891786654411764,3.8402941176470575,87.71549019607845,75.83823529411767,6.886274509803924,21.62745098039216,7.793537801064563,0.8725068627450985,539,14,109,8,12,173,87,136,0.063,0.7190000000000001,0.218,0.9806,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,2,5,10,0,1,2,1,18,0,0,0,1,26,34,12,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,11,9,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,13,3,18,7,16,12,0,12,0,1,3,0,17,8,0,4,3,79,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.13364403233402378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269867661978375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286695988556518,0.10530655959519544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21868782408559745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14014801423029113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387966021228655,0.0,0.0,0.1230823705843014,0.0,0.0,0.15410750194963888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500226905599553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155103719437496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110496519265805,0.1457864625720323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179510182462168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294084775843735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526446937256374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726048156582588,0.0,0.0,0.11500401391331284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905658935084357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916958434057407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494430384008214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773406255622719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21826379771452892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132869533048227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21086252866828956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459711200317228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567756743143054,0.0,0.1554099203788366,0.0,0.0,0.1029698091021332,0.1100757064094908,0.2394017252379661,0.0,0.0,0.15901020455989787,0.0,0.26325724809936585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925865077229546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,C0a1209,2020/01/31,"Help with identifying the right name for condition I have Hello everyone! As a title says I would like that someone far experienced than me helps me with identifying the condition (or more of them) that I have. I know that the best thing I could do is to go to the professional which job is to do that, but since I live in a country where a psychiatrist only gives medications without trying to really help (at least that's the way with my grandma) I believe it's better this way. I'll try to describe my life and my feelings as best as I can so it will be easier for you to determine the condition.  


I am male, 25 years old. I live with my family (parents and grandparents) in the same house for the whole life (that's pretty normal here), but since I was little I had ""problems"" that other kids don't want to play with me and call me various names (I had big ears, by the years my head grew up to their size xD) and my parents are deaf (the kids are brutal so most of them made fun of my parents)  which hurt me a lot.  
As I grew older (7-8 y/o) I started going on ballroom dance classes, and from that moment add ""faggot and moron (but in terms that I am retarded)"" as an insult to earlier insults.  
Fast forward to high school, in the meantime, I can say that I closed into myself a bit, never had a lot of friends, though of myself that I was funny (although I had a weird sense of humor, mostly dark humor, was an average student in school but as the teachers said highly intelligent since I was achieving higher scores without learning much than some students who learned maybe as twice as myself but were hardly any better than me)  
Now, highschool (we here have tests in which you achieve some score and based on that score you chose which high school you would like to go into) I did that test average, but there was a mistake in the grading and I got into ""car mechanic"" class in which only bad students went. The principal of the high school offered me a chance to switch class and go to the class I wanted but I refused and said ""who knows why is this situation good"", as a class where only average to bad students go, it was rather easy for me to be the best in the class without much studying. You may think that this is good, well no, they soon started mocking me that I am ""genius"" but in a bad way, like they thought that I think that I am better than them.  
During high school, I had one big trauma, my father (have problems with alcohol) got drunk and started arguing with family and broke the glass with his hand (he does this so that he doesn't hit somebody else, he did that for the first time when I was 6, and then he once hit my mother also when I was 5-6; *I realized that I didn't give you my fathers background, but average alcoholic that get aggressive when he drinks) and the glass cut his hand really badly and he almost bled to death.*  
After that, he stopped drinking for several years but then again started drinking when my sister from my aunt was born.  
Also one time after he started drinking again he attacked my mother and my grandma and I stepped in and pushed him so that he doesn't harm them, I was very close of hitting him, but didn't. My sister called the police and we all went to the police. *Here I believe that I got PTSD from that event since after that I was really lost and apathetic for some time*  
FF to 2017, I met one girl who had a really jerk boyfriend (he was/is punker) from another city who controlled her every step, and I kinda liked her, I helped her to get the courage to dump him and we started dating, I committed way to much and even neglected my job (I am a freelance video editor, so I really don't have working hours). I wanted to help her so bad that I did everything she wanted which lead to me not speaking to any girls she think I might like and want her to spend all the time together with me which made me feel really bad, but I was thinking that she would change.  
FF to summer of 2019, I was feeling really bad and I decided that I would like to see how down can I feel before I brek (snap) mentally.   
September 2019, several days before my birthday my grandad wasn't feeling right and we take him to the hospital.  
**Grandad** *the person who was always there for me and the person which I loved the most, I look like him and he was my greatest support for my whole life, when I decided to quit my job and pursue freelance career he was the only one that supported me*  
And then on my birthday (how ironic), we found out that he has a lung cancer, only one of his lungs was working and he had water in lungs, and they are sending him to the specialized hospital in the capital for treatment. Since I was the only one who was available (since I can work from anywhere) I went with him, for 3 weeks I was there for him every day in the hospital and I believe that it was much easier for him that he had someone who was there for him. After those three weeks and all the analyses they did, we returned home and waited for a date when he will go to start receiving medications.  
 November 2019, grandad was getting weaker and weaker, couldn't walk alone and as days passed couldn't even get up from the bed to sit, but he insisted that he tries which resulted of him passing out almost every time he tried to get up, and I even had to do a CPR and I managed to save him twice.  
But unfortunately, he passed away on 11th of November, on my hands. This was and still is a shock for me since I never experienced the death of a close relative.  


This was my life up to this day, and here what I think of myself.  
I am introvert, I don't like places with a lot of people but again I could easily become the most talkative person if the surrounding is the way I like it.  
I have anxiety when I'm supposed to go and do some official talking or speak to phone with someone, but in the years I learned how to fake this and since it's easier to look happy than to talk to others about your problems I always seemed like a happy person to others when in fact I never was.  
I would like to do some things, but my family and the persons around me always say ""why would you do this or why are you doing this"" and I don't want to hear that and I always give up from doing things I like.  
Lately, my life came to this routine ""Work 7-9 hours, then go to my gf, sleep at her place, wake up, come home to work and like that in circles"" without any ""me"" time that would relax me.  
For example my grandad was a carpenter and a painter and I would like to work with wood and to fix things. He also gave me his moped and I would like to get the licence for it and drive it but my father will say ""why are you spending money on that, you don't need that, save money"" but it's my earned money.  
And we have grandma who don't like my gf, and she wants that I be at home all the time.  


Wow, what a long post, it could be longer but this is enough I guess.   
Feel free to coment and discuss, even ask the questions you'd like to be answered.  


I guess it's some kind of depression, PTSD, and anxiety. (I forgot, I never wanted to harm myself, to die or to commit suicide) but I'd like more detailed diagnosis",4.5813185781760914,5.0327775745125365,5.34599854668766,84.53521012474266,69.56406685236769,8.471890517136975,27.377497880586173,8.456263369488248,1.6999549715393003,5551,169,1159,80,92,1807,474,1436,0.107,0.738,0.155,0.9975,7,1,6,0,0,2,171.0,7,12,9,20,46,78,11,0,70,0,115,28,10,8,11,221,196,118,4,30,32,11,10,18,3,14,11,11,4,10,90,88,8,6,24,9,6,29,23,33,1,10,61,26,193,46,175,107,35,162,0,5,3,1,146,60,0,27,86,821,283,38,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717925743674525,0.06726880314546066,0.03478793962260115,0.0,0.0805830220182,0.11179452291797826,0.0,0.0,0.06852475058053785,0.03522085904049182,0.05139078748610944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029901215705063083,0.031401059444509015,0.038212188864794217,0.03155784920244428,0.0,0.1963171250856995,0.0,0.03709626815895031,0.05716330915449268,0.11352946342242486,0.10574834092353158,0.08911987828360507,0.03667034678423053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859598380820812,0.03841671929704577,0.0,0.0,0.035532570914317184,0.028933837489392013,0.0,0.0,0.03767277401494238,0.08045393903783983,0.0,0.0,0.08664817008628083,0.0,0.028930044658925663,0.0,0.03485994423747319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029393846636923113,0.0,0.0,0.13161722139959453,0.0,0.0,0.028059190997118517,0.0,0.0,0.03470628175628223,0.0,0.08874052785168163,0.0,0.08490021538224016,0.032095604866575235,0.03018751068569243,0.0,0.0949937923893582,0.0,0.10190125194261443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02857067580748098,0.0,0.036828462441713734,0.02595067777233017,0.0,0.10529279000512176,0.09666451475342328,0.1527146317861465,0.05634550137041856,0.08059226362922854,0.0,0.07400385466930517,0.0,0.0,0.07151195375633825,0.03008903014560285,0.0,0.0344718711834106,0.0,0.03785709784600042,0.0,0.11256955825883436,0.17744242745624342,0.10107712634790887,0.0,0.06615654230904035,0.038757046447821866,0.035957580218221145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999531238726644,0.0,0.0,0.03497763948716205,0.03691912924086999,0.0,0.037889708579648206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862406170888043,0.29537685586004714,0.033664872022867484,0.0593191754729812,0.029725093120098425,0.056412382738888364,0.0,0.03666621959305218,0.08566816880679402,0.03031526672521882,0.06356520219898565,0.0,0.0,0.03374453473648414,0.0,0.0,0.06767450593525573,0.03384968094450045,0.035632483244933656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876673743871618,0.02490572162781835,0.10362322945220387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032909961173924036,0.0,0.0,0.0352458689869903,0.03577105050861756,0.13656412628276585,0.15327509601917705,0.0,0.0,0.1118893960460524,0.0,0.0,0.0232862933425144,0.14664252924540142,0.07018644060152975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03216885280129999,0.034171956379404136,0.0,0.0964200374292584,0.07852718353659137,0.0,0.03762722176414655,0.03572589796124938,0.0,0.0,0.1506252322602878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736942319694342,0.06390141461055318,0.10684487086997224,0.0,0.1699686491797528,0.02676598075958544,0.03057804589277365,0.0,0.07589172520000143,0.0,0.2222804840175908,0.037755297389256905,0.03361312765005245,0.0,0.08537922208439881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16642062630965332,0.0,0.026824115106050254,0.02808179947193113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03674077227144173,0.07623250364495518,0.0,0.0,0.0252546501811594,0.053994923037263436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925981134129621,0.10761195872811163,0.03300089440174049,0.026665811001550903,0.13710158217351406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121855205558038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02771433560107432,0.1584926870697473,0.13330640853754153,0.05388593120146589,0.0,0.03020042814371939,0.09341165747946034,0.12123492365449258,0.07500154803356926,0.0,0.12951388888792895,0.0,0.14671858515041186,0.0,0.0,0.21474512691123068,0.0,0.0,0.08652052453973072
mentalhealth,SATAnCable,2020/01/31,"I decided that life was worth living today Lately it felt as if everything was getting me down. My boyfriend of three years left me because he realised he never loved me in the first place and was just bored, then when I went on a date with someone to take my mind off him I heard through the grapevine that this guy didn’t even like me to begin with. I would often think about my ex and when I was contemplating him and what happened a man old enough to be my dad walked up to me and called me beautiful, clearly half drunk and I completely lost it; was I destined to only find love from creeps on the street? Not only that, but my mom doesn’t want to talk to me after I ditched my promising career as a lawyer to follow my passion of infrastructure technology, saying that she’s “devastated” on me and that I’m “making the worst fucking mistake of [my] life”. My dad is also very tight on funds at the moment, and while I’m waiting for my job to kickstart I feel like a leech and I hate it, especially that I sit at home  isolated with my thoughts day after day while he goes to work. Every day I have been extremely close to fucking ending this vicious cycle and offing myself.

But while I stood in the supermarket queue today, buying my binge food of cookies and chocolate milk, a baby smiled and laughed at me. Their mother was getting bags from under the item belt, so the baby turned to me instead, smiled, waved and giggled. And I don’t know, something about that changed my perspective. For once I felt like the world wasn’t full of hatred and scum, and that there was pureness and gold within the hearts of people, too. I could finally see that people aren’t born spiteful, and that no one is two dimensional, everyone has thoughts and reasons why they do things. I went home that day, drank my chocolate milk and made chicken burgers for me and my dad so we could sit in the living room and watch the old Alien movies together like we used to; I texted my mom and apologised for not discussing my plans with her first, but that I wouldn’t be doing this if I wasn’t sure; I booted up my PC and spoke to my old video game friends just so I could talk to someone instead of surrounding myself in silence. 

And I know that getting out of this depressive circle isn’t this easy for some, but I just wanted to share this with people to let them know that sometimes it’s the little things that can make a difference, and that there isn’t only evil in the world. Thanks for reading my long ass story haha, and thank you to the people that make me feel welcomed and loved (looking at you, r/dnd )",10.23759765625,6.5972991269531285,9.144000000000002,75.101,60.66015625,11.880625000000002,38.490625,8.982922981607832,3.23955828125,2051,66,412,21,20,640,253,512,0.115,0.7509999999999999,0.133,0.6402,2,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,2,2,3,5,18,29,6,0,21,1,31,15,2,6,4,82,76,45,0,10,11,7,5,4,1,2,2,3,3,2,30,36,5,2,13,4,3,4,13,11,0,6,23,11,69,18,67,45,5,65,0,2,3,7,37,30,3,4,33,286,99,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656775647904777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050064339110798835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386165704816756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688031312117718,0.0,0.08610942631653573,0.0,0.0,0.19671707494216786,0.0,0.0,0.2118625237286116,0.0,0.07073654604497963,0.0,0.0,0.08580606158538343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274084600585859,0.08485996224502415,0.0,0.05424463138963388,0.0,0.06919620605979779,0.07847662380934196,0.07381116291996402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305255758688591,0.058672110300068574,0.1577111174343398,0.08996698066542247,0.07506331310330892,0.13971571413862552,0.09930925087393347,0.0,0.06345172759954637,0.1518516387791924,0.12872514329326745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131942520257472,0.07262533434980795,0.0,0.0,0.08108419064308027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732182776449824,0.0,0.0,0.16476174132687044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814991600411246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354058583183847,0.0,0.0926437254824022,0.0,0.08923208522380828,0.08398123062523677,0.11601857518078693,0.16049396098989982,0.08231362232651132,0.1450406882071707,0.07268051062383782,0.06896666002700491,0.0,0.0896521855087792,0.0,0.22237061358071689,0.07771130161079337,0.16446281467507318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829256569081718,0.19237415243808512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334201543665635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585379038180315,0.08746341705350426,0.0556519166653095,0.1873856576257325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277482777036048,0.0,0.08580606158538343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215001594628113,0.0,0.0,0.0844410475119301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531131577109324,0.0,0.0,0.06544521630578654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917322159852016,0.06322598591237981,0.08122648530084596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740447107470041,0.0,0.061749877902047286,0.13202241492019715,0.0,0.15122447147156282,0.0,0.0,0.10912411006185198,0.052624172297729165,0.0,0.13040058458091414,0.0,0.0,0.15569508583427286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933145301876927,0.08022691817190028,0.0,0.0,0.07093204240912618,0.0,0.06776402869279959,0.09688219797858813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15226657011963493,0.07410755721647122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059790009985025386,0.0,0.0,0.05834122636472267,0.0,0.0,0.052887604738385934
mentalhealth,will7772600,2020/01/31,Why don’t I have a mental illness? That I know of at least. A lot of people that I know have really bad anxiety or depression because of their past. Many have gone through physical and emotional abuse and have come out the other side much worse off because of it. I have also experienced great physical and emotional abuse. Many times it seems as though I have gone through much worse than many of the others that I’ve spoken to about these things yet I haven’t sustained anywhere close to the same amount of damage as they have. How am I different from others? How do I not have some crippling issue like many others?,4.773127917833797,6.4197062941176455,4.8372549019607884,83.93209150326798,70.09243697478992,8.314098972922503,26.66760037348273,8.841846274778883,1.9600412698412697,495,16,94,9,9,154,71,119,0.22899999999999998,0.698,0.07400000000000001,-0.9709,1,0,0,0,2,0,8.0,0,0,2,0,6,5,0,0,5,0,12,1,0,2,0,16,18,10,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,6,0,0,3,0,0,3,3,3,0,0,2,1,10,2,18,16,7,11,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,4,4,72,21,0,0.0,0.33477368579809225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297693832644325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807438743835332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795806811277952,0.1722388998471184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169522655211745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216792739719232,0.0,0.0,0.14760148551019903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178289527355065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15575532027182712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14745357578622525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15528122734227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901944518789234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010628518794644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5729195187140099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237118020615644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20770560581230788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13486222328873668,0.09794175227932758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050387936715217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861073902853135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093856310687796,0.0,0.13880119849690573,0.0,0.0823781305952471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274780048236885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879409880195528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GetDisneyPlus,2020/01/31,"I feel like I was born to kill myself I’ve always been anxious and had trouble speaking , as a 19 year old you can only get so far 
Because of my social anxiety I’m a burden to my family 

Nothing makes me happy, 
I’m extremely insecure I feel like a freak 
I’m paranoid, and I do think that I should die because my life is only going to get worse",1.8581531531531537,3.174280310810816,4.6875675675675685,83.42207207207208,76.97297297297297,7.095495495495496,25.84684684684685,7.793537801064563,1.555376576576576,269,10,55,4,6,97,52,74,0.3720000000000001,0.57,0.057999999999999996,-0.9776,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,8,1,1,3,0,7,1,0,1,0,7,17,4,2,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,3,3,11,3,5,13,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,30,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177481355755535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16317269215543126,0.2409664789929825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600494497179102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22137006369689086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20107874842243967,0.0,0.2157001598516668,0.3047608391185233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228792208374712,0.0,0.12122239616782632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270601130381668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23598307678224556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065896788354818,0.20841364821626446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237833827074428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466556746310133,0.0,0.22382079011804712,0.0,0.0,0.3244460895459321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174308574708834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667300209035554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21736929216390605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13735717631943134
mentalhealth,yanderelul,2020/01/31,"Who can I get in contact with for resources in regards to a neighbor whose family doesn't care for her. Long story short - I recently got new neighbors. It's a family of a mother (probably 60s) a daughter (probably low 20s) and a son (probably teenager)

The person in question is the daughter. People in our neighborhood recently called the cops on the daughter because she was wondering in the streets, stripping nude, falling against cars, laying down in the road, etc. Her mother even came outside and said something along the lines of ""Oh look, shes dancing in the street again!""  Most of the neighbors thought she was on drugs. The cops came and took her away. A couple days later her brother let us know that shes schizophrenic and that they are sorry for what happened. When they first moved in, she came down to my apartment to ask to call her mom (who was at work) because ""she smoked meth and its making her freak out"" which is why I'm wondering if the brother was lying or idk.

 It's been about three weeks since the cops took her away, and today is her first day back. She's doing the same thing. In the streets, dancing around and laughing at the cars dodging her, eating grass, etc. She's fully clothed this time. 

So I'm not sure what we can do. Obviously her mother doesn't seem to care about her wellbeing. The sibling is the same. The hospital/cops didn't keep her for long. Is there anything I can do besides calling the cops? I'm genuinely worried for her. We live right off one of the main streets in town, and it's always busy. Her running into the streets is terrifying me. I've tried to get her to come sit on my patio so she doesn't get hurt, but she ignores me and walks further down/in the street. I've gone up to the apartment and tried to talk to the mother about getting her out of the street, and the mother just basically says she'll be okay.

In case it's useful, we live in California. (Northern CA)

TLDR: Neighbors mentally ill daughter (and/or drug addict) is running into the busy street and laying down in the road. Her family just lets her do this. Who can I call, asides from the police so she can get some help? Or do I mind my own business?",3.7708235294117634,5.489967035294118,4.166882352941176,87.45197058823533,72.76470588235293,6.882352941176473,27.558823529411764,7.510576382923642,1.4781058823529412,1710,64,338,20,34,536,207,425,0.065,0.902,0.033,-0.7339,0,0,5,0,0,0,64.0,5,0,2,3,14,9,0,0,35,1,33,7,1,2,2,50,63,20,0,1,7,13,0,0,4,1,5,2,5,1,17,26,1,2,6,2,0,16,5,4,0,4,15,3,47,5,57,44,8,80,0,2,1,1,70,47,0,9,16,225,64,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204210149517933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025324038096857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947940503657021,0.07516136711463782,0.0789314581713703,0.0,0.15865114734125432,0.06492212088529441,0.0,0.10293653901954256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3448533980994943,0.28969923874396103,0.17216578063668914,0.0,0.0,0.07272971116044717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934211423460042,0.0,0.10890184174959444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19582598862458767,0.08639384949931919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18832545771936327,0.055765787732483404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387817061959548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363369531599116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22055820188495384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752707284529612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466193198477482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05659222673539796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903849834733687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504602906246742,0.0,0.0,0.046400993421078965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17267255249354174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491079950942401,0.14943731108151612,0.07090065920181125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056358255665767375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508645003862368,0.0,0.08525110157908786,0.09888440455075853,0.0,0.08973664396341073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154385215599792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057212536838375086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05853372852527568,0.07372177160921478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730922465652665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458188778725923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673057982692455,0.0,0.0,0.07210349439622205,0.08031308375657792,0.06714280986921763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686268530566275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984208111493526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499900209922979,0.0,0.09451343698967718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957508776291143,0.0,0.0,0.06786232828726073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609211273365119,0.0,0.0,0.06702867301003232,0.049232314314021634,0.0,0.0800305844578387,0.0,0.187611587475348,0.11464602553859132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155993068335177,0.07292115586529271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772534430199935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761857201207999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18312333542859174,0.061466672736671224,0.0857436382219565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kyz0n,2020/01/31,"Lazyness and Short term memory problems I've always been lazy, I studied the bare minimun in school, and still do so in college, but it feels like it's getting worse and worse to the point of me wanting to do a bunch of stuff and instead do nothing for the whole day.

There's also something that I just noticed recently, like when you go and open the fridge every several minutes if for some magical reason food appears. The problem I have is better said with an example:

""I wanna do X, but first I need Y thing"", so I look for Y, find it, wander around, and then find a comfy place to check my phone, then I remember I wanted to do X, so I go back to my room, check my phone again and spend 10 minutes browsing twitter before going back to what I wanted to do.. >!or not doing so entirely.!<

Also, this might be an influential factor, but I daydream.. alot, it's probably the thing I do the most during the day (I may or may not have daydreamed about the potential outcomes of this post..).

While this not may seem so severe, but I wanted to do so much. I wanted to get better at studying, maybe develop some skills, but the whole of 2019 (except for a sport that I got into), is me basically in my bed daydreaming of what I could've done, and it's taking a heavy toll in my own self esteem and my ability to progress like a functioning member of society and student..",9.444629010695188,6.111330702205883,9.36760695187166,71.94343582887701,61.83088235294117,12.24385026737968,38.69786096256684,10.018931242160765,3.6970102941176473,1069,38,209,16,11,353,151,272,0.07200000000000001,0.826,0.102,0.8603,0,0,1,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,0,6,18,8,0,0,18,0,20,1,0,1,0,50,38,29,0,10,12,0,1,3,0,4,0,1,2,1,15,14,1,0,6,1,3,4,3,3,0,1,4,3,26,5,31,29,10,30,0,0,1,0,5,12,0,12,16,158,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18316424830708705,0.09529035665150476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194766020655653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761186251391104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744864013970142,0.0,0.0,0.20256842081882792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143542211585147,0.0,0.0,0.14771269316618973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719438787620165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648858867619546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057905082690385364,0.0818135767821637,0.0,0.0,0.20933960270707974,0.0974112082205258,0.13847882716337573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966462817123127,0.0,0.19525417724822505,0.0,0.09159262718938653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784701794472626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616850504731464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505138771200242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214883143883414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418585624937873,0.0849156124873537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988565438222553,0.1303825215167547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964970702413323,0.0,0.10825903263293944,0.0,0.10967912833277717,0.0,0.12347263240265903,0.2191615955217288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774630380348793,0.11307532812909077,0.0,0.12972957442519506,0.0,0.10893536516530104,0.0,0.0,0.1159010139471404,0.0,0.1042553006274299,0.11947001622432325,0.258751479856019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881635930021157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145634074370164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109874789201714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610527814988912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15216486524297004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33773623884535564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557164367265955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334126566388681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadassdinosaur,2020/01/31,"How do I help my room mate/relative who is hoarding due to an eating disorder? This situation is maybe a bit strange but I could really use an outside perspective and some advice from anyone that's gone through something similar. I'm going to keep it vague enough that anyone involved doesn't recognize the story entirely...


I'm living with a hoarder of sorts. I had a relative that was down on their luck and needed a place to stay. We have a spare room in the house we own and I am more than happy to have them stay here. 
They are funny as heck, keep shared spaces cleaned, help me with random errands and what not. They're great and I love them. 
So the problem is that I was trying to respect the fact that the spare room was 'their room' and not a place I could invite myself into. I really wanted them to feel like this was home. After a few weeks of them staying here there was a VERY POTENT smell coming from their room. I said I was collecting all the garbage to put in the bin outside and if it was ok if I went in their room and they said 'of course'. Once I entered the room.... my lord..... the garbage... I shit you not.. I used FIVE BIG BLACK GARBAGE BAGS to haul all the trash out and only about one bag of it was actual trash. The rest was ROTTEN food. Now I'm not talking old stale chips bags, I'm talking some girl interrupted shit with rotting meat from half eaten rotisserie chickens carcasses, take out food containers half full with rotting food, drink cups completely full of mold (shoved under the bed, under piles of clothes, literally squirreled away and hidden) I basically pulled every single thing out of that room and cleaned in including having to wash the carpets, furniture and walls to get the smell out.


Mice and roaches are a real thing that I don't want in my house.. so as nice as I could I brought up what I found with them and we had a conversation about how things can't be left in that kind of condition and that they can have a space in the fridge or a cupboard in the kitchen, whatever they needed and it was a good conversation and in the grand scheme... they've gotten a bit better but... now I just straight up ask to clean the room once a month or just go into the room every time they're gone and pull rotten food out from under the bed. They've never questioned me doing this and I feel like I'm imposing on their personal space but at the same time... houses are expensive and I don't want this room to be trashed.


The real problem is this: obviously there's some kind of eating disorder going on here if they're hiding mass amounts of food (unhealthy foods). They eat super clean when they're around myself or other people but it's an outrageous amount of food that's being eaten and hidden in the room. They have eating disorders on their side of the family that's resulted in deaths and I just need to know this: what can I do to help them? how do I ask them if they need help? I already feel like maybe I'm stepping on toes with the cleaning although I'm assured I'm not (by them). This is one of my favorite people and by talking with people in their family it seems that this has always been an issue for them. They've dealt with a few traumas in their life and I think this might be some kind of coping mechanism. I just need to know how to go about offering help in the right way.",4.120958835341366,5.3229597605421715,4.6083132530120485,86.66193775100405,71.1234939759036,7.762248995983938,25.279116465863446,8.144726394080802,1.3462767068273087,2627,76,539,37,48,833,280,664,0.086,0.78,0.134,0.9902,0,0,2,0,0,0,70.0,3,1,24,2,22,27,3,0,46,1,46,21,3,7,6,113,93,46,1,17,20,0,3,3,0,1,2,2,22,2,35,44,15,3,9,1,1,14,10,8,0,5,23,10,64,19,89,62,20,90,1,0,1,1,50,61,3,17,14,361,99,0,0.0,0.0,0.05754807866946603,0.0,0.0,0.0576266692483047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507697059554415,0.0,0.049069354377997317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824690631513455,0.0,0.0,0.05249750386577215,0.1102615529641038,0.0,0.05540605194257195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05215586328059669,0.12876410718901818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050799079891383166,0.0618309270546886,0.0,0.0,0.14125281785584454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027607584547364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0577700222741899,0.0,0.2413719506273406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060933748602017265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937275748689917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118693929536487,0.0,0.08945391084681881,0.1263886357379508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4991634849417133,0.06465965693418059,0.0,0.0,0.030810389700397376,0.0,0.13406038489591712,0.04946284133042039,0.0,0.06501674044386622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277669620196412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976381454905448,0.0,0.05915363535193417,0.0,0.0,0.2041370039054217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061551354057644,0.0,0.10483388879312873,0.0,0.18423051246193475,0.06481884044986608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407315422273982,0.0,0.0416536049875796,0.08643209128643542,0.0,0.052073278130627065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05322445240343888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849042261363946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625598786801575,0.0,0.0,0.04707081700845934,0.0,0.0,0.21863462514917847,0.04548277353008875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061881100810349775,0.12560632188883908,0.07992178666101687,0.04485079595181167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226510942056269,0.05149199833131552,0.1232261916420907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285630964771083,0.0,0.05928305905007705,0.06606203705915115,0.0,0.0,0.13424589140362653,0.07555783293575817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0503616900691547,0.1121915842364158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368581325580777,0.0,0.0,0.12106763908717842,0.0,0.06628689917481434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04539945845810857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18856863308479466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04433953818438373,0.14219816556158452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753495252086872,0.03778681960664071,0.0,0.0,0.06877399148632328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04003805678339949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186559422464876,0.0,0.04865800289545909,0.10434948365742948,0.04680915830687644,0.047303710147823225,0.0,0.0,0.054667552628479416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamklaxar,2020/01/31,"Wife loves when a celeb dies... My wife has been crying for the past few days because Kobe died. Here’s the catch - I’ve never seen her watch a single Laker game or talk about Kobe ever... not once. But she’s been depressed all day saying things like “Why do we deserve to live but Kobe has to die?” She does this kind of thing anytime there is a celebrity death and it annoys the crap out of me. I feel like  she uses celebrity deaths as a green like to be mopey all day and seek attention. Sometimes I think she likes being sad and I absolutely hate it. I am now so desensitized to her crying (since she cries at least a couple times a week) that I have little to no reaction anymore. I feel like my wife is emotionally unstable, but if I say something to her, she’d reply with “I’m allowed to have feelings” or something along those lines.  Am I being a complete ass about this or do I have a point here? 

Thank you in advance. Any advice would be awesome. I really appreciate the opportunity to vent here...",3.2832000000000012,4.8812295200000015,4.271000000000001,86.70550000000001,73.8,6.8000000000000025,24.0,7.413659706084162,0.94495,784,23,161,9,16,254,129,200,0.218,0.638,0.14400000000000002,-0.963,1,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,1,1,0,2,10,14,3,0,12,0,19,3,2,2,4,27,29,13,5,2,8,3,3,5,0,1,0,2,0,0,8,7,0,0,5,1,0,2,3,5,0,0,3,8,24,9,19,20,5,17,0,2,3,2,19,5,2,4,15,107,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104116207086595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423364282648706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284253967451972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550802582071399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987193881309786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13705621144156532,0.4081854510848424,0.23965143447820456,0.0,0.1066862569265467,0.0,0.38566241544498187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10839663441026794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393334304331056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112044573869804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878922634592685,0.1769808729398672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222927790413752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898816704246568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.302575205369086,0.12414703220732365,0.1093766164171624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179458492974176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553367970247427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13191405440563095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824483606622607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170941233263636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07935221678953425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19700763478428845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246386199554908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190717363361032,0.12250739065681952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955940787159026,0.0,0.11403986849129898,0.0,0.0,0.16458313974697905,0.07936881683101144,0.0,0.0,0.07222770254070608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069811084071418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993584415209696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117704826069372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799139077837931,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stare_at_the_sun,2020/01/31,"Vicious Cycle I have brief glimpses of hope, followed by the harsh reality of how far behind in life I am... 

To put it into perspective:
- I dropped out of school. 
- No real job will hire me. 
- I do not have friends. 
- I have a partner, but they do not see me as a long term person. I am temporary. 
- I can not drive. 
- I have little to no family support. 
- I can’t afford therapy bc no work. 
- I can’t do things I want bc no money. 
- Can’t get help from the gov because I am not ill

I sink deeper into depression realizing that others have way bigger issues. I just don’t know how to catch up to everyone around me so late. A lot of how I am is due to unfortunate events, but I know that I haven’t been someone who’s preserved. I’m so tired..",-0.1988315412186381,1.892782883870968,2.68962365591398,91.11665770609319,87.90322580645163,5.7670250896057365,20.224014336917566,7.1686216300943375,0.5363261648745516,557,18,126,9,18,196,95,155,0.154,0.7559999999999999,0.09,-0.8306,3,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,1,1,7,5,1,0,5,0,21,3,0,3,0,21,30,8,0,2,7,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,3,0,1,5,13,2,0,0,1,1,21,3,19,28,2,21,0,1,1,0,6,9,0,2,5,89,27,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784389445767524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218968391710963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17264336963473031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915342143421417,0.0,0.0,0.1889621280786255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15486365499051924,0.0,0.10472447288530692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435435779807714,0.0,0.0,0.1990875564843804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20921296912322174,0.19891117673391867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203191509473665,0.0,0.2261111948076522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415805469685703,0.0,0.20089899662690802,0.0,0.1773879127897104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170411550893553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502123262623231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015030374629689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22815080157979345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20286149345851426,0.1597290693599915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698367766247108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274631176709297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292268374382284,0.0,0.13316704817259312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303825544088575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822791789979975,0.15910426572206898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14592667258230602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,a1thirteen,2020/01/31,"I have only just realised that I was groomed when I was younger and I'm struggling to deal with it I'm a 25 year old man living in the UK. I started using online gay chat rooms when I was 16 and when I was around 17 I started talking with a man from Chicago. He had a nice voice and I enjoyed talking with him a lot. I've struggled with my mental health my whole life and I've often felt alone and isolated so he gave me a lot of respite from that. We became what I thought were good friends and I would talk with him every day. 

When I was 21 I flew to Chicago to meet him and I knew straight away that I wasn't comfortable and I wanted to go home. Unfortunately I felt trapped with him so I just tried to make the best of it. Over the course of the time with him he started to make me more uncomfortable and it became clear that he wanted to engage in sexual activity. I tried to make it as clear as possible that I wasn't interested but he continued to make advances. I had no money to stay anywhere else or catch a flight home so I was trapped.

On the last day I was with him he crawled into bed with me and pulled me against him. I just froze, I had no idea what to do. I have never been more uncomfortable in my life, I wanted to die. I won't go into more detail but he touched me inappropriately to put it politely.

I ended up coming home shaken and never told anyone about this. To this day my family think I had a nice holiday meeting a friend online. I blamed myself for everything that happened and carried the guilt and shame with me.

I've only realised in the fast few weeks that I was groomed and it's shaken me again as it feels like the healing wound has been ripped back open.",1.6996401515151511,3.641870971590913,3.1859090909090924,91.219696969697,79.3409090909091,5.9712121212121225,22.88257575757576,6.980632752743323,0.6048303030303033,1330,43,292,15,33,436,164,352,0.14,0.769,0.091,-0.9443,0,3,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,2,15,15,0,4,16,0,23,6,0,5,4,59,49,27,1,4,6,0,5,1,2,2,5,1,5,2,18,30,0,0,7,2,1,8,7,4,0,0,24,6,51,11,46,23,8,45,0,0,0,1,28,14,0,4,23,196,69,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111703994351358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541387425886932,0.0,0.0,0.0960127350585346,0.0,0.0,0.10133218141958078,0.08293290331575101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318589339999555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290648582643744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20867030658202232,0.11119251658181277,0.0,0.0,0.1119352010045888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009799794551453,0.0,0.09552644088844307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087146563216246,0.0,0.09693202758479466,0.0,0.10167494983981007,0.0,0.05453411438408818,0.07705076561700015,0.20711309483296875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16665513363205803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225915831138112,0.09046263784355524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537474596063376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11464353007807185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245584209098407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12175379535639673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791522989957552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523606360458911,0.05269191148883171,0.0,0.09523686820555737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338686238775634,0.0,0.0,0.2879729561781563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086912478876214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663669760694635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131744044902733,0.0,0.0,0.16405532727407715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158893735761366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842284342866806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290183926168004,0.11495778450096734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255043874824433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600663610746561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910835053935709,0.0,0.08562385797509042,0.06289040942191802,0.0,0.0,0.10305891362390683,0.0,0.14645128073258568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315104137977988,0.0,0.0,0.1908448705201748,0.0,0.08651380075748416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041489936992265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661623445017528,0.0,0.0,0.06945430147136124
mentalhealth,cac192105,2020/01/31,"Feeling empty and wishing I just wasn't here Wishing I didn't exist in the world is a thought that is becoming more and more frequent in my mind.  I feel I have no self worth or self confidence or self esteem in who I am as a person and what I contribute to the world.  I feel often my feelings are not valid in my relationship.  I feel I have no value.  I struggle with wanting my partner to see what's upsetting me in our relationship and help to change that and also realising that he is who he is and shouldn't change and if I had any sense of self worth I would know that I am valid without needing to hear it from him.  I know  I need to work on myself but I DON'T KNOW HOW.  That's where the hopelessness arises.  I don't know how to have cottage of conviction.  I don't know who the fuck I am out why I'm even here.  I feel failure on a daily basis, as a mother and as a daughter.  But then some  days i feel totally fine and think what was I worried about.  But honestly the emptiness and the feeling low are far to common.  I think of that line in forest Gump when Jenny and forest pray in the corn field and Jenny says,  ""dear God make me a bird so I can fly far far away from here. "" I feel that.  The worst of it all is that I have a beautiful  life,  with 3 beautiful children a roof over our heads so why should I feel this way.  I just wanted to put this out in the world.  Maybe someone will read it, maybe they won't I don't know.",2.116524122807018,3.3518925164473714,3.673026315789474,91.28951754385969,76.13815789473685,6.777192982456138,23.19298245614036,7.333567415737692,0.6926692982456141,1111,32,255,13,24,369,145,304,0.129,0.743,0.128,-0.4667,0,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,2,0,1,1,15,9,1,2,17,0,28,3,1,3,2,62,58,28,0,10,10,2,10,0,1,5,1,2,0,7,19,16,0,0,19,1,2,1,12,6,0,0,5,13,40,3,35,48,6,29,1,2,1,1,23,22,1,5,5,181,59,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976632819676634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783026507958742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371404895057296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101609133065439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211034729815878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432750534464779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658808694284214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.504342509286891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221297786176466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023675156939964,0.0,0.11242026976895264,0.0,0.06685721213342821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3289046470844509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045309744899074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665808022033416,0.0,0.2004152412176587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007143791943502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791984084884555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870938008213498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027163645439008,0.0,0.0,0.09977235231307953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141783755373136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932151360025741,0.0,0.0,0.07948413768703863,0.0,0.4162246557131703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451391967442724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427550710467123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12782559804021354,0.0,0.07918667401809228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766479504892652,0.07917322384660255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800093456463457,0.0,0.2294044823777032,0.09615096742779894,0.0,0.07261580989746044,0.10129625463405892,0.0,0.07085624176925967,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,exhibitionis107,2020/01/31,"I need help I need some advice please. For about 6 years now I've been struggling with mental health. I don't even know what I have anymore, I get anxiety, OCD, depression, so overall I think I'm just a little bit of a mess. I just don't really want to be alive anymore. I dropped out of college a year ago, and since then, I've spent almost every day sitting in the same chair in my house and I feel like I just can't move half the time. I don't find joy in most of the things I used to and I push away everybody who could possibly care about me, leaving me with no-one. I hate myself so much. I keep hurting people. My weight goes up and down, since I'm often sleeping through the day, and just don't get up to eat. My sleeping pattern goes all over the place. I've tried to force myself to throw up a lot, and every now and then tried to starve myself. I feel like I'm two different people, and while one of me is fucking up my life, the other is watching and screaming at me for everything I'm doing wrong. I've self harmed before, started cutting my arms, but I haven't done that in a while. I seem to have subconsciously found other ways of harming myself though, like punching the wall and telling myself it was an accident, or pinching my skin, or digging my nails into my palms, or tearing hairs out. I'm also pretty scared to go near knives in case I do something to myself. I also seem to punish myself emotionally by constantly putting myself in situations that I know are going to fuck me over. I've been suicidal a lot. The only reason I know I wouldn't actually do it is because it would tear my family apart, since they'd all have something to blame each other for. I constantly think though, what if I could just disappear, without hurting anyone? It's a no brainer for me. But since I don't feel like killing myself is the right option just yet, I was hoping people could give me some advice. What's the best way to go about getting antidepressants? My local GP is shit, so they probably wouldn't prescribe it unless they saw me on a ledge with a rope around my neck 🙄 if you've got any ideas or advice, please let me know, in comments or dms x",4.0551020408163305,4.825882163265309,4.939825396825398,85.82878571428573,70.90476190476191,7.603356009070295,26.49138321995465,7.675431598112923,1.328372879818594,1698,52,353,19,30,553,218,441,0.155,0.758,0.087,-0.9816,1,0,2,0,0,3,48.0,0,0,3,1,23,25,7,2,20,0,33,14,8,2,2,73,71,31,2,12,17,0,6,4,0,3,2,1,0,1,15,18,2,1,15,0,1,8,11,17,0,3,9,9,59,8,54,53,12,56,0,3,2,2,9,28,3,18,20,236,74,1,0.0,0.0,0.07600696299819447,0.0,0.0,0.2283322859007481,0.0690425678384433,0.0,0.07799307878740389,0.0,0.0,0.12457320860611913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05296616976479026,0.0,0.05958372306229049,0.0,0.1544869387672414,0.05446074983182615,0.0,0.0,0.06933638665404185,0.0,0.0,0.07317786861422218,0.0,0.0,0.04747949607809805,0.0,0.06627652442387663,0.0,0.08173812425800336,0.0,0.0850329755301113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941149551346842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16833743138516882,0.0,0.18656048904472486,0.0,0.0,0.10046198594778633,0.0,0.06708438821269445,0.0,0.0,0.08137585828315641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970595278993442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969835546337851,0.0,0.08761295229071887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051443958096042464,0.0,0.13124715326669614,0.0,0.07000026131619035,0.0,0.0734254016493276,0.0,0.11814677829349382,0.1669285331853085,0.0,0.0,0.07118776245522945,0.0,0.0,0.08539962177190465,0.0,0.1440114743532941,0.1220790096243773,0.07471678561811561,0.13279578071796766,0.0,0.06229374760142242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768977795375207,0.0,0.08279076857909883,0.0,0.0,0.05220634835651585,0.0,0.0,0.0773598601311601,0.0,0.08987171573829382,0.16676035581604445,0.08792550515597253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922998726179802,0.08617097694868506,0.0,0.17121972867090174,0.0,0.0,0.0824716147023025,0.0,0.07964524411837688,0.05501424350266231,0.15220758980786592,0.07806373514241875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324343316544107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849227901748566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08278208449020329,0.05725627314920079,0.11550518625849315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05277858463688885,0.059236952252198466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199215324840047,0.0,0.08137585828315641,0.17099416805746764,0.0,0.0878064515956332,0.0,0.07923958689901098,0.08397589669166877,0.0,0.0,0.07829844852891234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04989672587643679,0.08008132046445791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651549803423344,0.0,0.0,0.07797897344799866,0.0,0.0,0.1418117065245202,0.0812536474276198,0.0,0.07995039779894805,0.257717374061175,0.08754881152128496,0.155887495571029,0.0,0.0,0.11992320296157485,0.0,0.0,0.055129172227985315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142492448076398,0.0,0.08519628155952963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807710660206384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051744993020292035,0.09981432798677442,0.15304814337571138,0.0,0.04541682665170041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576099744126144,0.0,0.07608476840711964,0.0,0.0,0.06726979101675896,0.0,0.0,0.04594006453157887,0.12364694167609458,0.0,0.09484598999517588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750807690026588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055329044137482485,0.08515775247854257,0.0,0.1003139906111157
mentalhealth,TheBellyBotton,2020/01/31,"I am 18 and I barely remember anything before 8th grade So for the past few years my friend and family would talk about things that happened in the past but I'll have no recollection of the entire thing.

I thought about it for a while and I really can't recollect much from anything before 8th grade I remember what happened like grandpa died in 2011 but I can't really remember anything about it like what happened. I remember headlines without the the story the context  and it's driving me insane that a chunk of my life is gone. And when I sit think about what happened in grade 8th I think it's because I was severely depressed. That was because I changed schools and  I was very welcomed by the student and I made barely any friends. Things at home were bad because my aunt got cancer and stayed with during her illness. And seeing her during my illness made me feel bad because my problems are nothing compared to hers. So I kept the depression inside and didn't seek help because I thought I didn't deserve. To Add to that I was a chubby short kid(the shortest in the middle school). Everyone bullied me because I was the runt. So could the depression I had in 8th to 10th grade be the reason of loss in memory.",4.624157250470809,6.284125605932207,4.973333333333333,82.75857815442562,70.48305084745763,7.617325800376648,32.1789077212806,8.167268648758528,2.4717964218455744,977,45,178,14,18,309,121,236,0.253,0.688,0.059000000000000004,-0.9957,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,8,12,0,0,15,0,18,4,0,3,0,33,33,17,1,3,3,2,1,2,2,1,4,0,1,0,14,12,0,1,12,0,0,2,6,7,0,0,16,2,30,5,24,14,2,18,0,4,1,0,10,9,0,0,7,121,44,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576457114070082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23874665979520066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16149382642610385,0.3537127994814977,0.0,0.16458230696265602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230395300571704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721325145408645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498826726929141,0.0,0.10036735325603464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240837821383617,0.0,0.0,0.09116743898502018,0.0,0.0488983329084154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494323011801686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734600432591482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3420732971799662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482115142051732,0.0,0.09700573603098378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830752811934994,0.09449302179603854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18301438064375125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710913072531652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279367302817644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18463693774983184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253623482296124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390689351943054,0.099431650808684,0.0,0.0,0.4382040141262787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19574676698807944,0.07706353825011923,0.0,0.0,0.10925220563276734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307757044244456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773000836713674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19274495152867727,0.123932814150951,0.0,0.15355026700096125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979400347230584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322279855803788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869839513570596,0.0,0.0,0.06227660600387418
mentalhealth,sexysneks,2020/01/31,"Tips for growing some self-esteem? So I used to be very confident, but highschool and hormones happend. 
I never speak up in class and have a very low self-esteem and confidence.

I want to regrow my confidence!
Do you guys know some good ways to feel better about yourself and rebuilt your self-esteem? (Sorry if I’m spelling it wrong)

Thanks a lot!",2.9092857142857165,5.560530318181819,3.462900432900433,87.02863636363638,79.15151515151516,5.58961038961039,24.58008658008658,6.868970318607317,1.1184268398268404,275,10,49,3,7,86,50,66,0.04,0.619,0.341,0.9731,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,1,14,9,7,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,2,6,3,7,8,3,6,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,4,1,30,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890778407877251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809748095459422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17931497342238487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116834272774253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749212479418596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18175465108559072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16488624808757826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6690815660780415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23931781875329444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19682698401749216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18464392491151185,0.0,0.3527944720239717,0.12609752011397793,0.16969471934802854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337432808489598,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gunpas11,2020/01/31,"My low self-esteem and self-criticism is destroying my life. Any tips on how to overcome this?  

My low self-esteem is destroying my life

I’m 36 now,

I have always felt that I should impress others, or be someone to be accepted by others.

Even when people around me like me I’m hiding my true self. 

I always think that why other people deserve es this and that

I have all the talents needed to succeed. But my perfectionist thinking is letting me down. I’m harsh to myself.

I have always starting to feel insecure when I’m almost making it with something. Being it with career, hobbies or anything else in life.

My biggest passion has been music. I have heard from tons of people dräng the years that I have talent. But I always think that I’m missing something.

During the last few years, I have been more and more isolated with my thoughts. 

My low self-esteem has not gotten me to a point in life where I'm happy. I think about lost opportunities and chances in life. What if this, what that.

I feel like I have wasted so much potential by ruminating all the time.

I have so much talents just waiting to be seen. Career, relationships etc.

But my negative self-talk is sometimes killing me. I have by the way high-functioning autism and been semi-anxious my entire life.

In summary here are just some examples of what I Think

I always end my sentences with “or”, like I need the approval of other people around me that what I say and think is fine

**I** **compare yourself with others.**

**I** **cannot handle genuine compliments.**

**I give up too soon**

**I’m indecisive in the midst of simple decisions.**

**I’m are afraid to contribute my opinion in conversation.**

**I** **take constructive criticism too personally.**

**I back down during a disagreement to appease another person.**

**I believe the world is against me and people are against me**

**Social isolation**

Anyone can relate and what has been the most effective way to get out of this spiral to increase self-esteem and self-worth? 

Any source material or references on the net that has been helpful is appreciated.",0.9105385117493476,2.9201775195822464,2.513678524804181,85.5678546018277,109.31331592689295,5.0481592689295045,21.75877937336815,6.6274283507984215,1.251710208877285,1622,65,280,30,80,527,182,383,0.115,0.737,0.14800000000000002,0.8956,0,1,2,0,0,0,93.0,0,0,0,5,18,26,3,3,12,0,36,7,0,3,3,56,67,22,1,4,11,0,3,3,0,1,6,2,0,3,24,17,0,1,14,0,0,1,3,11,0,0,11,6,46,15,42,50,12,35,0,5,1,1,10,21,0,10,14,205,70,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443729171678462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092697181184301,0.0,0.0,0.10110277196902198,0.07794832779300781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05197782656326155,0.0,0.0611726260430752,0.1323505346935538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05716019906545077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375180759448705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062098627831181565,0.0,0.06584009673950936,0.0,0.0829048751453318,0.04909857355803742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517356102160029,0.053106028183347656,0.07137472134938287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03883776609065619,0.07131036822326807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913261295116372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04982620563902738,0.07854061982897696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224235083902763,0.0,0.0,0.060594189290732174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07601413308037826,0.3150365152283695,0.10895121342997902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114709810126561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04962020754880371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929179802326994,0.11023918247619664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576779323382883,0.12981557235586005,0.0,0.0,0.07027204364154176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980960798707334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059115388185162016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6203936606333147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577672563296445,0.06298509624742152,0.11445577711831033,0.07352072382533613,0.0,0.05261577487440025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589181536871648,0.059748882831451626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28579106115758185,0.0,0.059014897235347474,0.043346225420059406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800974664072593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707715134174014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574056952859224
mentalhealth,amideadyet30,2020/01/31,"Can it be a sign of an actual mental health issue if someone believes in a lot of conspiracy theories? If so, which one(s)?",3.41,5.2529933333333325,6.298333333333333,71.28,74.0,9.8,28.66666666666667,10.125756701596842,3.395566666666668,96,4,17,3,2,35,21,24,0.152,0.848,0.0,-0.5803,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,2,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,14,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.35979387444061184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4153938622914036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3919063493656185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3848225807965292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134519484486263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3715586055194124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498377872886341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3123947189736169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GarfieldGauntlet,2020/01/31,"So I’m pretty sure my ex broke up with me because of me being toxic and she said it’s not me but that’s TOTALLY a lie. So we would still talk, right? One day she said she wanted to ask me a question and she said what if me and her got back together—- *but* she liked somebody else and was wondering if I was ok with like a poly relationship or something.

This....

this never would’ve happened if I weren’t toxic. Like, I feel no empathy or sympathy, and actually, I sometimes I enjoy making other people upset and I feel like it’s because I used to be bullied and ignored and right now my parents don’t seem to actually care that much about any mental problems I have. My autism might also be a part of my social issues with her but idk.

anyways, I should’ve been protecting her while she was in dark times, but INSTEAD I argued with her and was toxic, good job me!",1.2429794826048202,3.512759881355933,3.243157894736843,88.40320249776985,82.954802259887,5.76021409455843,21.745168004757662,7.0608816371341465,0.7290971751412436,677,22,138,9,19,228,105,177,0.127,0.6890000000000001,0.184,0.9035,3,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,1,0,0,0,9,14,1,1,4,1,13,0,0,2,3,39,28,22,0,6,10,2,2,4,0,2,0,3,0,0,8,14,0,2,5,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,10,5,31,9,12,13,3,11,0,1,0,0,22,4,0,9,11,102,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.26989530243533105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105876438349694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094039544823339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292791865179406,0.0,0.0,0.1063337631093526,0.0,0.1685963028647756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409922772401696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918333600987276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552060505695225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984359327728085,0.09879188513778067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598813399888327,0.110600326506372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228627285578918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443351516052109,0.1372279881604834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702391456235571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230729565671768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393602411450509,0.14670009639833032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016564703308206,0.0,0.1066550543590448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370649412094137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15355076502412693,0.1497507761529529,0.0,0.09587042964771117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14068705962812444,0.0,0.1323214802663146,0.0,0.0,0.1549124999809406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846792153103613,0.0,0.23619178757362735,0.3946263140960305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589081286610213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096564610336182,0.0,0.10645968426963953,0.13676885942821504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043575730627717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033336582668534,0.0,0.0,0.11114943014409774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063595545256076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194351140675162,0.0,0.0,0.08156494564151734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14996578287747422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19646948795070726,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TotallyNotaHen,2020/01/31,"Looking for advice on which creative outlets I could try Hi there,

I've been depressed from a trauma for a very long time now. Certain events always feed it, again and again. I've been to therapy on and off for years and it helped, but still, sometimes, I get hit hard by a low. At this point it's like lucid dreaming: fully aware of what is happening, working against it, getting better, until I can finally snap out of it, after a few days. After the last time I felt exhausted, a bit frustrated, moody. I want to stop falling into this cycle. I feel the urge to get rid of the negativity inside of me, get it out, put it into something that makes sense to me, that I can show to others so they will understand how I feel. It's like knowing what you want to say but you absolutely have no clue on how to open your mouth.

What I've never tried before, yet seen countless times in movies, is to put my feelings into art. That's not something I'd do in a normal therapy session, that's something for behind closed doors of a sanatorium, right? At least I never did that, neither in behavioural therapy, nor in analytical...

So I want to try out different outlets, be it writing, drawing, painting, music... but I need someone to tell me how to start and prompts like ""draw what you feel"" but more specific, because I have absolutely no idea how I'm going to do this. But I need to do something. I have enough free time to try one new thing each weekend and see how that works for me.

Can someone help me...?",4.960791251778094,5.521451064189193,5.754032716927456,81.55682788051209,68.76351351351353,8.258605974395449,30.78165007112377,8.20500826718156,2.130239189189189,1169,45,231,15,19,383,163,296,0.115,0.789,0.096,-0.7842,1,0,4,0,0,0,51.0,0,4,1,3,13,12,1,0,10,0,17,3,1,6,3,46,42,19,0,7,6,0,6,3,0,1,1,1,1,0,25,14,1,1,8,4,1,4,8,6,0,1,5,10,25,7,47,33,7,49,0,2,3,0,11,21,0,0,27,161,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185468982591114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867297023291983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353910039985368,0.0,0.08869409086809213,0.0,0.0,0.09218508281569797,0.11379477913200453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832210857542967,0.0,0.0,0.06722127169384216,0.0,0.08977520887959478,0.0,0.0,0.10890066779716467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769992686972964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21081212250895404,0.07446364364816363,0.10007944479858463,0.1141814936280452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178284969292577,0.0,0.05923767198256736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217236245969006,0.0,0.09337175238243248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13972955417547372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176656864812493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05728339825132753,0.08496331344751727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15276804930459698,0.0,0.0,0.09224238936661708,0.0875289600048516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957593288478388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15457399999170732,0.16078089713524912,0.10066829637913352,0.0,0.0,0.10212561623878608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063056824969975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853330394218368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095646918428974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901389561489062,0.0,0.0828897839007112,0.0,0.0,0.08305972361565764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766315396783504,0.3209727593028308,0.10308850363999818,0.0,0.0737762254972758,0.0,0.08324012510340119,0.08714294924289732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911037072551287,0.0,0.3575964820780361,0.0,0.06924737156641214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24311499041341475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28306781621083155,0.0,0.0,0.10850959890528313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600264178223474,0.18443690100541668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15176484958441566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712224483664936
mentalhealth,askreddithoe,2020/01/31,Please help me stop fucking crying before the end of my break I’m trying to spend my lunch break gathering my composure. I broke down at work and it was really embarrassing. I just didn’t get a lot of sleep last night and I couldn’t focus at all. I’m a cashier and we have a new computer system and it was just too much.,0.3439705882352939,2.594843985294119,2.4750000000000014,92.45750000000002,87.08823529411768,6.341176470588236,17.323529411764707,7.645422480735847,0.3723764705882351,253,6,57,5,8,85,49,68,0.165,0.762,0.073,-0.742,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,1,3,3,1,1,4,0,5,3,1,0,1,11,9,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,8,0,6,5,3,11,0,1,0,1,3,3,1,1,5,35,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422353726958152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126994286847551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521353837710712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631751850725937,0.1487296578074813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19081000944389104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320461227686456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420184217933296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092670788945815,0.0,0.0,0.2749385224357139,0.0,0.2671459036737771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124849740407431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823685248139724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28487813684042235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379989983668662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19327397486941586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20724500663679926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pyrokid_suicidal,2020/01/31,"Mental illness is a burden Fucking hate my mum stupid bitch. I’m 19 turning 20 this year and this week has been a complete fuck up! Been in a&e twice, almost got sectioned by police and they did a welfare check on me at home. Well basically been getting worse with depression lately and self harming, and self harmed quite badly so had to call an ambulance twice and police attended too. When police did a welfare check I wasn’t at home so my mum answered and spoke to them. Anyways she’s pissed off at me saying why I’m doing this and that it’s all for attention and I need to grow up. Fuck sake! Like I have a choice to be mentally ill, I wish I wasn’t and I could live a normal happy life but clearly I can’t. Thinking bout moving out now or if I don’t and I end up having more mental breakdowns like this my mum said she’s going to kick me out. I hate her.  Hate my life, and I definitely won’t be able to stand this anymore.",1.240309278350516,3.395407515463919,2.9125876288659818,91.45754123711343,82.09278350515464,5.323298969072165,21.555670103092783,6.508806274219699,0.3700874226804127,734,23,155,7,20,242,119,194,0.20600000000000002,0.705,0.08900000000000001,-0.9671,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,1,7,18,9,0,7,0,19,8,1,0,2,27,36,17,0,5,3,3,0,2,0,1,4,3,2,2,7,14,0,0,3,0,2,4,5,14,1,2,11,3,23,4,20,21,3,23,0,1,0,3,14,12,5,3,8,102,30,0,0.12653079936327855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670231822622344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13709606824610274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548455312834342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564793227331737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292020931413725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266513578319875,0.0,0.0,0.10102454738672766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089807920841953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206873190489304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3509270553636401,0.06610712030115902,0.0,0.0719103691815668,0.0,0.1011982390593122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346943887528638,0.0,0.37476890585680267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538414169042965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273225297546896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874489110115785,0.12363311450270192,0.0,0.11172901398948154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3825398561896942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344822152885931,0.0,0.09382098446193388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12397331834355853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458108010679726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035976545598027,0.10062237022809654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639984381557284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107582714223749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13762917547355288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014953750290596,0.0,0.11376638436570552,0.0,0.11417436581848844,0.0,0.14550417478240854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894569437978984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148168631473925
mentalhealth,Bully_Manger13,2020/01/31,"Little to no enjoyment in anything. I struggled with depression and self harming as a teen through my early 20s.

Now im 24, almost 25, work two jobs, make a decent living I guess, brand new car, very supportive and intelligent girlfriend.

I just don't enjoy doing things anymore... Video games, building things, drawing, exercising, and socializing just don't provide the same level of excitement to me like they used to... anyone else experiencing this?",5.940274725274726,8.757083833333336,6.304432234432237,69.7096153846154,69.64102564102564,8.559706959706961,32.93772893772893,9.23628265651192,3.577572893772893,361,17,53,8,7,116,66,78,0.16,0.674,0.166,0.1389,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,1,3,8,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,2,0,11,7,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,3,0,1,3,3,0,1,0,1,6,5,8,7,1,7,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,2,4,32,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21549358395326626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134224255953992,0.15047414909767412,0.2204997441195645,0.17709280015198012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853530527070372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17977354577643673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23706911857136806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324549451836809,0.0,0.2135546468027463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10513676194907093,0.21568880629104228,0.1900271912402533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364891729108314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078433041544308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22450248106221368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21937120239436086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249757167211316,0.0,0.0,0.24420852841188634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28594111608222217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21022095400281107,0.0,0.0,0.18586531758161345,0.0,0.1775640780361384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15666952221644734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrsOni,2020/01/31,"Need advice for possible hospital visit. (USA) I need advice on getting down stuff that happened (so I can fully explain my situation , how to get to the hospital without my birthers and sperm donors help ( they won't, trust me) and also how to keep them and any unwanted guests out. If you can help please comment thank you!!",3.5874999999999986,6.229834750000002,4.240000000000002,82.47500000000002,76.5,7.333333333333335,28.33333333333333,8.344100000000001,2.334833333333333,255,11,45,5,6,81,47,60,0.069,0.768,0.162,0.7337,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,2,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,13,11,8,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,9,2,8,10,0,4,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,1,0,31,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4555124107990838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18638836712019904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15849760964711285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435420105509594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20610565455955826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31244779298399794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20716596170012874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3456413028375265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558441267422147,0.0,0.2627547498961177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26198377974451265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668127844482875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21458227323226173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22467402249839813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asaplamp,2020/01/31,"What is this phenomenon Okay so I’ve had this casual feeling for a while now and everyone I’ve brought it up to just finds it strange or funny, but I’m genuinely curious as to what is going on with me if nobody else can relate (google didn’t help). 
But basically I’ll be chillin by myself (mood doesn’t matter), and have urges - like I just got a burst of energy, wanting to do something in my immediate area that would definitely cause injury. Things like slam my head into the wall next to me or sprint into the wall in front of me while laying on my bed. I don’t WANT the pain- I just mentally feel compelled to do the act. And i have never acted on them, bc I have common sense. 
So yeah idk of this is just like wires crossed or would be classified under somewhere I haven’t looked before but yeah. It also helps to know I have ADHD and don’t take my meds for it but I don’t think that plays into it.",1.57998817966903,3.572191585106385,3.4216312056737586,89.13388888888889,79.95744680851064,6.518203309692672,20.01891252955083,7.594959193182576,0.5840770685579204,710,18,153,11,18,238,112,188,0.07400000000000001,0.723,0.203,0.9695,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,8,8,0,0,6,3,21,2,1,2,1,33,33,18,0,5,12,0,2,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,13,8,0,0,5,3,0,6,7,1,0,0,4,3,17,6,24,25,0,25,0,0,1,0,3,13,0,4,9,104,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411919298384149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16049275176367295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17077350581460016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20616523735136255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765182029433973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917691276231659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20295109221319352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834282028403537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405748479685555,0.0,0.16051115776964733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20596716254022696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690382820197685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102946842186124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29414288033013924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16853013784835882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22292278010284464,0.0,0.20224961679440093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478549474416478,0.0,0.21343746325380655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21354968189355314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545019596025014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15089487341965602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13333037517042468,0.12859487479920567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23674584464421136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28513066799636383,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RepresentativeDamage,2020/01/31,"Does it ever get better? I decided to stop takint antidepressants after having tried all the ones available to me for over a year. I’ve been battling depression for 7 years and it just never seems to get better. Most days I think about dying, or feeling like I’m waiting to die. I don’t really have the things I want in life- a girlfriend, lots of friends, my dream job. And I just feel too depressed to try. I can’t even get out of bed today.",3.210571428571427,4.6333869777777785,4.239841269841271,87.565,73.66666666666667,6.920634920634923,23.968253968253972,7.447530270364453,0.9598253968253974,348,10,72,4,7,113,68,90,0.158,0.674,0.168,-0.25,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,6,7,1,0,4,0,5,1,0,0,3,19,15,3,2,1,3,0,2,1,2,0,1,0,1,0,3,3,0,2,5,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,2,8,4,14,14,3,11,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,4,9,47,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315340613368685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087715567519952,0.0,0.3228672003986028,0.0,0.3890464993987446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640216785783849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379606619673415,0.16954160229890172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18954096752879784,0.13390037436953445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14480832607725466,0.0,0.29377407408031025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859958331905514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323876929862977,0.09156906642137573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15934669390719872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445579430654841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700774589078254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007276671961326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706296721531997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567002762102557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452048439450103,0.12009788527317695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17766218203235115,0.0,0.0,0.2545059891353548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055135491744143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413981715591901
mentalhealth,magic_123,2020/01/31,"Intrusive thoughts I keep having these intrusive thoughts that I might hurt or kill someone and I can't stop thinking about it and it's scaring me. I'm scared that I'm going to snap and harm someone and it's seriously freaking me out. This started just a few days ago and I can't seem to stop it. I don't want to hurt anyone or do anything bad, I'm scared that I'm just a ticking time bomb waiting to go off. I have no history of violence or anything like that so I don't know why I'm so scared but I am. I don't know what to do :(",0.5782973805855143,2.219855211864409,2.793636363636363,94.14003852080126,81.62711864406779,5.985824345146379,25.134052388289675,6.980632752743323,0.8358881355932204,417,17,100,5,11,142,62,118,0.294,0.6659999999999999,0.04,-0.9731,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,12,1,4,2,0,11,0,0,0,0,24,28,11,1,1,6,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,11,6,0,4,6,0,0,2,6,11,0,0,2,0,11,1,9,25,1,10,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,5,7,59,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513770364720912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659656646026704,0.0,0.2509066780471613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12728936045154612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831762135925896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17328166687211188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3264017004278309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550454154568226,0.16866330888982256,0.0,0.16756503759989336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07447935675148233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16172533094591968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6105160763537921,0.0,0.0,0.13878473071032651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583407365051352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790487625393927,0.0,0.0,0.2549100090463521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976837876799788,0.0,0.2420565010596244,0.08889480581046334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991894450868594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756238945972052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sushirollofsadness,2020/01/31,I constantly cry without a reason Is this a dry eyes thing or could it be because of mental health issues?,2.884285714285717,5.180756714285717,4.238333333333333,83.37750000000003,77.09523809523809,6.104761904761905,24.785714285714285,7.1686216300943375,1.3191714285714284,85,3,15,1,2,28,20,21,0.154,0.846,0.0,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,2,1,1,0,4,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026791554053888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.359297078049626,0.0,0.2654614129953771,0.0,0.36521805276293373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3534149356466154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3470269054015513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33506566267974164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418489187161312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22088759039395955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32050270339043496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shokkikukko,2020/01/31,"I just don't want to be alone I have a few very good friends, one of which I see kinda often. My very best friend lives in a different city nowadays so we can't hang out that often. I have other friends too, but for some reason I just don't get to see them. 

In my opinion, quality is always more important than quantity when it comes to friendships. Still, I often find myself wishing I had more friends so I had more people to ""choose"" from.

Idk if that sounds selfish or mean..By that I just mean that if there were more friends the possibility to be left alone is smaller: If one friend is busy working and another is on vacation it wouldn't necessarily mean I had to stay alone.

I have depression and one of the only things that keeps me on the go is friends. I just want to have a good time with good people and not have to stay alone so often bc when I'm home alone I waste my time sleeping and browsing the web.",2.483297872340426,4.199707914893619,3.4914361702127685,90.95875,76.23404255319149,6.614893617021277,23.98404255319149,7.413659706084162,0.8544936170212769,720,23,158,9,16,231,100,188,0.132,0.652,0.217,0.9698,1,5,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,1,2,16,13,0,0,7,0,20,1,1,1,0,35,32,14,0,7,10,0,0,0,7,1,0,1,1,0,10,8,0,1,5,0,0,3,5,2,0,3,4,3,20,11,19,25,7,16,0,1,2,0,9,6,0,11,5,112,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4955871767906002,0.0,0.0,0.07963094767126977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003509048559852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043235729993163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824379885135241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242718202045059,0.0,0.0,0.09998723788773917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08746903429933085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5175688063598546,0.0,0.0499998534943819,0.0,0.05438911735113376,0.2408085237466159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599596532265388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506349857748076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397948079243574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450578856099225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.312739527449006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19454854334454671,0.07278496794437096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13269412906577382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078885648520166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839662780308124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252270738168697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577017331816326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20400919126217096,0.07642698946549194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357953127346923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160811440485224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15792679286174602,0.11289392844039188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100514950401464,0.0,0.0,0.0696715108609692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PizaMozarela,2020/01/31,"Is anyone else afraid of getting help because of your parents? I know I need to get help from someone. I need someone to talk to so I can get my feelings out. But knowing my parents I know they're going to scold me for ""being depressed"". My parents are very unsupportive and knowing them I'll just be in trouble. I honestly don't know what to do.",1.2467142857142832,3.665213600000005,2.9939285714285724,89.18232142857146,84.42857142857143,4.642857142857143,28.75,5.985473137389443,1.2590000000000003,272,14,53,2,8,90,47,70,0.077,0.802,0.12,0.4588,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,12,19,3,0,2,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,12,1,11,17,0,3,0,1,0,0,8,2,0,0,0,35,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213018155688812,0.1777515902536533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575229122539877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941876694051806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492095569041644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771710975255913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27190968828038514,0.0,0.0985931418542642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325610594573961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4767025796818519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572676440196416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5778897263389593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29397945369239925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13943730326712328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313983614299775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soapboii,2020/01/31,"I'm afraid of what's happening. I've been dealing with depression for the past few years. Stemming from a abusive childhood and recently. Financial and just life problems. Start of January I was transferred to somewhere quite far from my house. Making me spend more on public transport and because of the transfer I'm earning less. None of my superiors listen to me and I had a breakdown my first in years a few weeks ago. Was crying and shouting and screaming at the top of my lungs at a lake. I was just angry why is this happening to me and then started punching and hitting my forehead on a wall eventually just calming down and going home. I have been noticing drastic changes in myself. I get irritated by the littlest things (sound of a spoon hitting a plate. Water dripping etc etc) and I have never been a violent person but I've been having thoughts of hurting myself or worse other people just like strangling the life out of them I also have not been sleeping AT ALL in the night but sleeping away in the daytime I don't know why. I've been smoking like a chimney and drinking and taking more of my heart medication than recommend. I'm afraid in losing control over myself over my brain. I have tried to get help went to The Institute of Mental health and they have me anti depressants which my mom threw away because she says I'm faking it and anyways those medicines will make me weak and like a zombie. She used to be a nurse and thinks that institute is a mental hospital like those you see in them horror movies. I'm so lost I'm so afraid I have no one to talk to. All my ""friends"" tell me to man up and that I'm being a pussy because only girls do drama like this and guys are tough and don't. My family aren't helping in the slightest and they largely don't know about my severe depression except my mom but she thinks it's fake. Help me",4.203091334894612,5.776395573770497,4.7898243559718985,84.0035655737705,71.40437158469945,7.195784543325528,29.46487119437939,7.7094869923839395,1.8867723653395787,1484,60,280,18,28,474,191,366,0.177,0.742,0.081,-0.9892,0,0,1,0,0,1,23.0,0,1,4,7,9,24,1,3,22,0,28,13,6,4,3,45,58,28,0,1,10,2,0,5,1,1,5,5,1,4,12,22,2,1,5,2,1,4,8,16,0,2,14,6,40,8,46,39,10,39,0,6,1,0,24,22,0,1,18,196,52,3,0.0,0.11798086905724205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826781056552363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963061574211798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871092123787549,0.0,0.0,0.18210118612801174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115936320465684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533784027739117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116825647533788,0.0,0.0,0.10937918187404744,0.0,0.10265812848678288,0.2572930985642641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754623355974344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22210635507692755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938710660160531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846990017154347,0.0,0.0,0.076931904445178,0.0,0.10404834034915804,0.0,0.056591139752808814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859555422516196,0.17610884664197773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584426544814862,0.0,0.11799763122701765,0.20023038878711166,0.0,0.09988250138732672,0.0,0.0,0.11489693718444365,0.10659779870480128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944835228874847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14066646058881793,0.24323817762747904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139968805848637,0.1086985907206738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293504655191565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031199704419584,0.2006976806362034,0.0,0.0,0.23324360853485535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679888417999002,0.0,0.0,0.09344500726382486,0.0,0.0,0.11336754379033916,0.0,0.0,0.06747504121727348,0.07573177307238918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950562304122868,0.06903322179195027,0.08694562158631014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095280454344785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591096665319301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831894692751716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918655794214363,0.0,0.0,0.0793489053443325,0.0,0.0,0.11249214765194868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199295135731263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096032297757166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486850060636763,0.08003514004664282,0.08703351189748297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615364092941974,0.1276081187344827,0.0,0.07905194777270305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760533377908455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600139531518798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987358454565657,0.0,0.0,0.09230763027106688,0.17970308220524747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10147609995917234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282469148750786
mentalhealth,calmballer,2020/01/31,"Does anyone know what's happening or any solutions to my problem? I have this horrible thing where I dislike things I KNOW I LIKE. It's really odd and hard to explain but basically there are many thing I like such as my youtube channel and thumbnails, football and more but often when I look at them or think about them I think, I fucking hate that. However at the same time I KNOW I like it, its really weird...

does anyone understand me or should I try and explain it again?",2.2625806451612926,4.790068860215058,3.3896881720430123,87.32453225806455,80.82795698924731,7.160860215053764,25.429032258064517,8.238735603445708,1.834476129032259,376,15,74,8,10,121,60,93,0.157,0.738,0.105,-0.6009,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,0,7,7,2,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,21,15,11,0,2,5,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,0,8,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,16,3,6,14,2,6,0,0,1,1,4,3,1,4,6,53,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453187866065142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766561003251484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462465204726877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828915917412439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494131912913494,0.0,0.17721773745709649,0.1953171768310935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261682673698233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899507330933264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612823319947614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20056960518200947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892975700895524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534712364885749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39429042084121796,0.2535242612585085,0.0,0.0,0.11535685965950447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431427775485089,0.0,0.0,0.205949070459872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frogger31415,2020/01/31,"I want to support my cousin how i am very close to and discovered she is reaching therapy because she was sexually abused I am very sorry if this is the wrong sub for this, i just feel so helpless.
One way or the other i discovered it, i really care for her and now discovered she was abused in childhood, she is now reaching to get medical help after reviling it to the army psychologist (long story) and may be forced to quit. I really want to support her because family is important to me especially her but idk what can i do, please help me or redirect me",5.3527792207792215,5.9426794727272725,6.9512987012987,73.21409090909094,67.9090909090909,11.376623376623378,32.98701298701299,11.20814326018867,3.9583376623376623,442,19,84,14,7,153,66,110,0.11800000000000001,0.7070000000000001,0.175,0.5749,0,0,0,0,2,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,0,12,1,0,1,0,14,19,9,0,3,5,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,1,19,3,11,15,0,8,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,4,5,64,25,0,0.0,0.42394878819560106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21811891426367733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824066240400005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686566856225922,0.0,0.09046026577711094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347101813470096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398338853989519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583262093035569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180229006313448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123135804175275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19638509969001386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19028858800599635,0.0,0.0,0.22922357169879845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002706566188617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40604089208603866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045946404773446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29523242745489386,0.2110468270419069,0.1420072815539787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19560566187562148,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HippyIncognito,2020/01/31,"I'm not sure it will work out with my therapist. Should I get a new one? I just had my first art therapy session. It went ok but I'm left a bit uncomfortable. My therapist insists that I have self esteem issues and feelings of unworthiness because of something I said. It was about my ability to socialize with others.

The thing is, I have noticed patterns in my interactions with others that are unhealthy. I don't think it's all me but I don't think I'm completely not wrong myself. I feel like my issues stem from bonding and trust disruptions from repeated trauma from birth until my twenties. I did used to have self esteem issues in my early 20s but some of my older friends really helped me work through it and I've actively worked on myself, so I really feel like I have solid grasp on who I am and a healthy self image. I worked on self respect and have eliminated several people in my life. 

I'm further confused because she even acknowledged that I speak my own truth despite possibly not having the desired outcome and said many women aren't comfortable with that. If I had self esteem issues, I likely wouldn't. Even when I'm depressed, I've chosen not to commit suicide *because* I like myself and think it would be a shame. 

She thinks my concerns with socializing are due to self worth issues. Meanwhile, I'm falling into social rejection patterns repeatedly and having a hard time making friends. My teacher suspected I had ADD when I was a kid. I personally think its more along those lines.

I feel a few things in regards to her perspective: I feel like my own intuition and concerns have been invalidated. I'm not sure treatment will be effective if her focus is my self esteem and not my social skills. My own goals won't be met. I'm frustrated too because I feel good about myself but she's insisting that I don't.

I think she has good intentions, but apparently her specialty is helping women work through self worth issues and I think she's projecting that onto me too. I'm not sure I should continue seeing her. I'm already annoyed and I already feel uncomfortable at possibly talking to her about kink and bdsm because I know she'll look negatively on that too. Bdsm isn't necessarily a self esteem or abuse thing but she seems like she would think so.

Should I give it longer because she's the expert? Or should I look for a therapist who can relate to me better?",4.280650154798764,6.306729174291946,5.3168679050567595,78.45722136222913,72.0718954248366,8.31741772732485,29.29027634445591,8.99025400887824,2.6267132897603487,1917,79,342,40,38,630,202,459,0.13699999999999998,0.7,0.163,0.93,1,0,1,0,1,2,37.0,0,0,0,10,13,27,2,2,12,1,42,1,0,4,6,80,80,28,1,10,18,0,8,6,2,11,1,3,0,13,23,22,0,0,21,1,2,2,15,8,0,2,11,14,70,19,38,55,8,29,0,2,3,0,44,14,0,7,19,234,93,8,0.0,0.06835409357757709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273263329503617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21100643886836734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051022771593439056,0.06298334662003907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06048764357612749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04968895007204821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620837972728453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20419120190478268,0.12364282915939985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049071714214744586,0.0,0.0,0.08914344567161206,0.0,0.030141030701203227,0.0553422149181937,0.0,0.09677651166416218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05167957167877857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733777428829534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3612848659933989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031705322117211145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626811581200358,0.0,0.04074867598088952,0.16910868978720184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689138410967088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03850901711590435,0.05848935572883824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557180764606147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06568129018565866,0.0,0.0,0.03909273866493248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03999549537170453,0.050373329180918115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007528295573004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739163309642818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097542101144804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04597205076149487,0.05251948324241725,0.5416562159979459,0.06517411550522839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23523377821561475,0.0,0.044413150385637666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310430628529687,0.0,0.16311851992907964,0.0,0.0,0.04636963175435178,0.0,0.0,0.06597438931329992,0.20095018795148664,0.11498149315359928,0.2957271753949665,0.0,0.0,0.03363993459658875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04982627666799437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05347989422260989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099977301029136,0.0,0.0,0.08196369333994395,0.0630757680570668,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nick_hobo,2020/01/31,"Having depression in your birthday fucking sucks I don’t feel good even tho its my birthday and what makes it more worse is its my second year of being lonely. Yeah ik my mom and dad wished , so did my brother and a few friends but i cant stay happy and i can’t get over the amunt of stress im holding in.",-0.6360606060606031,1.5458432727272715,1.2154545454545485,99.40984848484852,93.54545454545452,3.539393939393938,17.939393939393938,5.033348758259628,-0.7050787878787874,240,7,55,1,9,78,51,66,0.225,0.695,0.079,-0.8831,0,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,3,8,2,1,2,1,7,1,0,1,0,9,13,7,0,1,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,1,1,8,3,5,11,2,5,0,2,0,1,5,3,2,0,1,37,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23703894546896545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177435768174788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915501794770754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21262743856360503,0.2544282576439755,0.14378645800326564,0.0,0.0,0.2308340409464849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929673684689247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972752499656776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18370556823930972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32232395260304114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933384496316009,0.0,0.0,0.3152534228597092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164792207154091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804636563380377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17722694641599915
mentalhealth,unpopulargoldbrick,2020/01/31,"Just one of those days I woke up late, which already throws off everything. Then I end up taking a shift completely forgetting that I had made some other plans to enjoy myself today. On my walk to work (which felt longer then normal), tripped on front of some people, then  I had a sightly embarrassing/awkward interaction with a stranger.  Now I'm sitting at work and everything feels so out of place and it's uncomfortable. Hopefully I can find something to uplift my mood.
 It's just a weird off day and I don't like it.",4.319400000000002,6.1747967400000014,4.8610000000000015,82.47550000000003,71.6,8.200000000000001,27.5,8.841846274778883,2.1252,414,15,79,8,8,132,70,100,0.069,0.867,0.064,0.1255,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,3,4,5,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,1,0,16,11,7,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,3,0,0,4,1,1,0,1,5,3,9,3,15,6,2,23,0,0,1,0,1,9,0,3,10,53,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24331344741896666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23117695678072975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843924038665921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19528648758470346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39631990945008094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148510875693536,0.0,0.2117025843659445,0.0,0.20152158748930987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189938450641264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487195123460988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771905896499206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208630610867312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160309435291896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940804141939173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15285827581184744,0.0,0.23036251708066036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16974205540466422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16577916571528303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089963762885382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3210350630700542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Marie2553,2020/01/31,"Why do I hate everything/everyone? I get so down on myself and so depressed. I definitely have moments where I’m fine but the last two weeks I’ve been wanting to isolate myself from everyone to the point where I don’t even want to go to work. It feels so draining. I feel like it takes so much of my energy. I’m always so tense and feel so up tight anymore. All I do is stress out. I don’t live anywhere near any of my friends since I moved in with my boyfriend. And I’m terrible at making friends. I just can’t seem to connect with people. I try to act perfect and not like myself. I feel like I’m always thinking negative and I don’t know why. I have been to counseling a few times and that didn’t seem to do much. I can’t afford therapy. And it seems like nobody around me understands. When I do go to work I fake being happy. But I’m never genuinely happy. No matter where I work I’m always so miserable. I feel like most things/people annoy me. I stay to myself a lot and have a very hard time opening up to people. The only time I really feel happy is when I don’t have to work for a day or two then I feel a little less stressed and focused on myself. This last week I’ve felt more depressed then I have in awhile. I go to work and come home and clean, eat, and sleep. I feel like I have no time to do anything as I work two jobs.. usually 6-7 days a week. Any advice on how I can pick myself back up again would be appreciated.",0.6279646947567485,2.566714517915308,2.8396847746138465,92.34218346117474,82.97394136807819,5.9156877167174535,20.000945676158448,7.1029339738359605,0.3411125144478304,1115,31,253,15,31,379,147,307,0.149,0.64,0.21100000000000002,0.9641,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,7,18,22,2,3,9,0,26,2,1,3,3,51,57,28,0,3,5,0,11,6,2,1,0,0,2,0,5,18,1,1,15,0,0,6,12,9,0,3,4,11,39,13,34,50,8,46,0,3,0,0,2,19,0,6,26,163,44,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787004340085338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19892002114171728,0.0,0.0,0.10838093935136328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902893306927639,0.0,0.0,0.06557630957111228,0.07093908007852473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06127503675292554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864402554346481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278413989982853,0.0,0.13727005450064825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154056323345721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05263307246078841,0.0,0.0,0.15229030861197662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223405649215804,0.2277160599115814,0.07651283140048952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313326834210325,0.0,0.04163361191030022,0.0,0.1358653223371133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544875899427214,0.07138466007663492,0.07867525268790349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993340951783155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907789372051359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043794357585334086,0.12991246484470445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23358874588779915,0.07986815906816475,0.07036583028223395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677477592339353,0.0,0.0,0.053192257741427135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846955718938579,0.11715947547700108,0.0,0.06146018145727535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06060619974896675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16573656179574006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533077433667089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051050076351194025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21763447355737184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591861185157058,0.0,0.07974539823318913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493664382534444,0.0,0.0,0.1825643227185804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059915344888570525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112999976405377,0.0,0.0,0.05106075574263549,0.0,0.0,0.1858665014566138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05410281836653038,0.0,0.2335303470190585,0.08295786075835711,0.0,0.0,0.08776490704260778,0.06575082069973559,0.09400391551636453,0.0,0.19176235640275607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381177745866067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3480822172467907,0.0,0.0,0.05660796130495069,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kasha-UK,2020/01/31,"Is there any way to improve executive functioning? I'm Autistic with ADHD and depression, so that's a triple dose of executive dysfunction - I cannot maintain my own routine so I sleep at weird times, I struggle to get ready in the morning so it makes it hard to get anything done, I can't job search because I just can't seem to see steps to do so, and just in general I feel like I can't do a damn thing...and being as it's not something physical, it's very difficult not to hate myself for not doing enough/anything.",2.7212473794549257,4.4853586509434,4.36559748427673,84.74093291404613,75.69811320754717,7.729979035639412,28.758909853249477,8.515128840125781,2.1657538784067087,411,18,84,8,9,138,70,106,0.14400000000000002,0.73,0.126,-0.2025,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,2,1,3,0,10,2,1,1,0,12,18,7,0,0,5,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,1,3,9,1,13,16,2,6,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,1,2,54,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729196355535905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15442988457925852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.373753613091312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843276060517065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19559342075823213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323932643098521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346460384192976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482419448929256,0.16223408405320622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372916832204751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20342921702543204,0.22420566318304574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253530938763943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094534790082784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158521918486098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809623800598293,0.20673540835425425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22725532217346475,0.0,0.0,0.17482599245870095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374051539931852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086938200674474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241877464284224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18737412154610494,0.0,0.18025451921870916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadbuthaooy,2020/01/31,Is an mental health access center free? (USA) I want to check myself in but don’t have a lot of money. I think I can recall my doctor saying it was free? But that just sounds too good to be true. Any info on if those types of access centers are free?,0.9326415094339636,2.708535471698113,2.7930566037735858,93.9175094339623,81.0754716981132,4.24,12.486792452830189,3.1291,-1.4492837735849058,192,1,42,0,5,64,45,53,0.0,0.674,0.326,0.9652,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,7,2,0,0,1,9,9,3,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,5,8,6,7,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,2,0,29,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26729320648478666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40231195169920025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32967875704832456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4178027238729649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341642157038585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3961104424966222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125758345269963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518559667348712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23183604193570775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flamingtrashmonster,2020/01/31,"I’m so sick of being bombarded with ads everywhere I go “Is your life shit? Do you hate yourself? Buy our stuff! It’ll make everything magically better, because what’s truly missing in your life is our product!!!”

As someone with CTPSD who used so drink herself to death, has an eating disorder, and also used to compulsively shop to try to deal with things, I’m beginning to realize how detrimental constantly having ads shoved in my face is for my recovery and mental health. 

For instance, I had a bit of a mental breakdown while I was on my university’s campus, so I went into a bathroom stall to process my breakdown in hiding. Once I became more coherent, I looked at the door of the stall and saw an ad for some alcohol brand, with the ad basically saying how their alcohol makes everything occasion better and will make you socially likable. 

It pisses me right off. People can’t even pee on my university’s campus without being told what they need to make their shitty, stressful lives better. No wonder mental health issues are on the rise! Companies are confusing people about what their actual problems are and making people think that mindless consumerism will solve everything. It’s exploitative and viciously feeds into itself. 

But there’s no getting away from it, and I guess all we or I can do is adapt and resist.",7.319234972677593,8.116702836065574,7.5351475409836075,70.01203825136615,63.67213114754098,10.768961748633881,33.889617486338786,10.650279960617883,3.887286666666668,1068,43,172,26,15,347,153,244,0.191,0.759,0.051,-0.9874,1,0,3,0,0,0,25.0,3,4,4,3,9,11,4,2,9,0,20,14,4,9,1,36,42,18,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,1,0,12,15,5,0,3,2,3,3,4,8,0,0,5,3,26,3,32,32,4,18,0,1,2,0,17,12,2,5,3,122,38,3,0.0,0.0,0.1071459654624516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346790539770164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780456539998242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315783020223457,0.0,0.0,0.06693118954219163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913193865858222,0.11986981060584186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186514754553578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319581385316288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583679435133235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755919145289587,0.0,0.1123496704123831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251983686733163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960352033086213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736436432021168,0.0,0.062400125695083374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095369721355627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840173722849752,0.0,0.2334180049003318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145994689745677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15510563774056288,0.0,0.0,0.09695270092589822,0.0,0.09220176829146803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3664515174263466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319484433370828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141303249993383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693014726230827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22835810000135898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050608337872209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937659784573032,0.0,0.08731492580877935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270497101007505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192414326960723,0.09303058264079576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577201256120646,0.0,0.12569121637582192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294420164029858,0.0703534394564798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491567203533438,0.0,0.07454490833547064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18965858970366206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178285428937606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584032258523847,0.11907008716159065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRAJOKES,2020/01/31,"I’m on the verge of a breakdown - I hate my job
- The person I thought I was going to be with has cut contact with me by a dramatic amount
- I can’t seem to cry at all and it ends up just being me feeling so much sadness in my heart
- I barely have any friends and the ones I do have are extremely busy already

I don’t know what to do or where to go in life right now, but I can feel my mental breakdown right around the corner. I feel so extremely sad and I’m losing patience with everything and everyone around me",2.572272727272729,3.4286701818181835,4.147045454545456,89.82056818181817,74.45454545454545,7.3181818181818175,26.47727272727273,7.645422480735847,1.2490909090909086,400,14,91,5,8,134,72,110,0.154,0.816,0.03,-0.9228,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,2,0,6,0,12,2,1,0,1,19,23,8,0,0,3,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,9,0,0,6,0,0,2,2,5,0,1,2,3,15,1,16,19,3,16,0,3,0,0,3,12,0,2,2,65,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21929773968253588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513966702614116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.353814378001403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21828984276567165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17601117312732933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18989004635225026,0.17860102114276966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30144366394052197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153534274413751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258797476250252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961995811269384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23548982471754026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972036834239592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921394365330092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036519124679192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22232220038392594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20026784073024206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460855810964155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466105602148992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17351881537287747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394197577941417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809115788930636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577652799551415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,br199612,2020/01/31,How do you deal with someone that uses their mental health issues to justify their shitty behavior. I have some mental health issues myself so I know where this person is coming from to a certain extent. What really infuriates me is that this person acts horrendously on a consistent basis and whenever asked what is being done to address the issues there’s an excuse why nothing works when it seems that no real effort is being made.,9.550569620253164,9.048792632911393,9.588449367088607,61.49507911392409,59.379746835443036,11.444303797468354,32.40822784810126,10.686352973137794,3.713908860759492,354,10,50,7,4,117,61,79,0.15,0.81,0.04,-0.8805,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,2,2,5,1,0,0,4,0,9,2,0,3,1,11,15,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,8,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,7,1,6,11,2,5,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,2,1,42,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16367677979470374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150816482983191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18050046921640409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17916829843485285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37220510170738574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5482161544072568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621975012736028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656655505734621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35288024493981285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16799461198484295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057473523815786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19928011727504413,0.11216115183156604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15938685422345045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834527220168833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512134736574268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15798306055159264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274608032248722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LoveLifedentist,2020/01/31,"Should I be scared of myself? So lately I’ve been thinking of murdering my parents for abusing me all my childhood til I was 17 years old. My life is a total mess and am all lonely because of them. I reliving the traumas all the time. I’ve got numbers of mental diagnoses and also living with anorexia for 15 years which I’ve even been forced hospitalization where I also experienced awful traumas here from staff.


I’ve tried to commit suicide 2 times. 

Whatever ...I hate myself ...I’m overloaded with anger anxiety depression sadness I can’t even develop relationships with people...and so much more ...I give up.",2.8448496240601533,5.7871365175438605,4.457644110275691,77.60684210526318,82.94736842105263,7.116791979949875,27.441102756892228,8.192908349453996,2.5618365914786976,489,22,80,11,14,163,80,114,0.35700000000000004,0.627,0.016,-0.9926,1,2,0,0,0,2,19.0,0,0,1,0,8,10,3,1,3,1,8,2,0,0,5,12,13,7,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,10,0,0,4,1,14,0,13,7,6,10,0,3,0,0,4,2,0,0,8,55,15,1,0.0,0.2386272532333344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32212061598904324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407121475397872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277218107052147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17346638732447148,0.2044177768859559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660469238326697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19320219232794536,0.0,0.0,0.16107877909031007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988417926292305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22718910190347025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14225548337026878,0.0,0.0,0.17784077400637113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20296483931340567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480529094692638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21133647159436791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22363197776856894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21622930320117492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20163753701394768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203000067430518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904962943233056,0.0,0.0,0.2348770869917965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13673805958997076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593912833227324
mentalhealth,xanthocroic,2020/01/31,"feeling that my arms weren’t really mine last night was a normal night for me. i stayed up way too late, watched some youtube, and snacked for awhile. everything was normal. so as i was laying down and relaxing, i suddenly felt very nauseous and very hot. after that, my arms and face didn’t feel like they were mine, so i prodded at them until they felt normal again. is this normal? this has happened a couple times. my arms just suddenly don’t feel like they’re mine anymore. it’s weird. it’s unnerving.",2.694489795918365,5.1794776326530645,3.0422040816326543,90.7063673469388,78.79591836734693,6.3689795918367365,23.065306122448977,7.554174236665415,1.0327436734693878,400,13,79,6,10,123,63,98,0.018000000000000002,0.877,0.105,0.7906,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,3,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,9,5,4,0,0,15,15,8,0,4,1,0,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,5,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,8,7,14,3,8,7,1,15,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,1,12,49,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912819069553816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775403456169767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442065590831973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433925251723241,0.2292580906684035,0.3081238213118682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418897786532482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307921964567958,0.18100016777885036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15678036324317562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011521942192962,0.6288471162615638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027915469580433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17102362300438134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09356256923579448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647842689594205,0.0,0.1273616674067067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,squidthrowaway1,2020/01/31,"Anxiety from recent mass media My biggest fear of all time is a disease outbreak.

During the Ebola outbreak I suffered from frequent panic attacks during school and general anxiety for the month or so that it was in the media spotlight.

With the coronavirus being the centre of the media's attention I've slipped back into this mindset. I've had nightmares for the few hours that I've actually managed to sleep, with more anxiety during the day.

The rational part of me knows that the situation isn't as bad as people are making it out to be, and I've gone through the stages of trying to get to grips with the facts but every time I do, the irrational part of my brain drags me back.

I'm not normally like this but I'm seriously considering going to my gp to talk. Is there any advice you guys could give that might help? I would rather not go on medication if not 100% necesarry because I know the anxiety will eventually go away with the media attention of the situation.",7.666737967914437,7.268342438502676,8.298721925133696,68.87161229946524,63.117647058823536,11.544171122994651,36.34705882352941,11.00357731598739,4.110837860962567,784,33,137,19,10,263,114,187,0.128,0.843,0.028999999999999998,-0.9151,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,5,7,1,2,17,0,13,3,2,1,2,28,24,9,0,5,8,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,8,8,0,0,4,0,0,4,4,6,0,0,3,1,10,1,28,15,5,21,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,3,10,95,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.1362163341010145,0.0,0.0,0.13640235804467676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492363846853227,0.0,0.4271333050277557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587998483830978,0.1311461556514476,0.21466687669219095,0.11654893606600375,0.08509066334982553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155824750300846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144849938010973,0.0,0.0,0.09002177499606293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760768601955605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15707367254961607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292820949448263,0.1339041349797502,0.2379907540038593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382126271236659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935619199795424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374646310552587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342623126432928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819493599050573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931751039138545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061876067796847,0.0,0.14807926750362066,0.0,0.0,0.11141664994341516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367651788596622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16377473709901635,0.0,0.30231725520638875,0.0,0.09677173598402658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13782487514448682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412690375582861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138022541596193,0.13968735456104278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219437889456067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16278807595937864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477010259347968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991582779317222,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blueishade,2020/01/31,"How to stop those feelings? In june 2019 my(17f) cousin(18f) had to take her final exam. The thing is: we cheated, i'm the one who sat the exam. [She's 11 yo on her id so they didn't notice •tldr] I did it because i was afraid my cousin would get punished by my uptight aunt if she failed her exam. 
My cousin (me) passed it with high scores and since then my whole family won't stop praising her. Especially my parents ""oh (cousin name) is so smart, blah blah .."" 
I don't like it, it feels like I'm jealous when I know it's Me who took the exam. 

I can't tell the truth, we'd get yelled at and worse. It's been months and i still hate seeing my cousin get the praise i kinda deserved.

How to stop thinking about it and just move on?",1.152875576036866,2.808063683870966,2.431082949308756,97.35233870967743,79.90322580645163,4.944700460829494,18.813364055299534,5.288315135182226,-0.5759216589861755,561,12,133,2,14,180,95,155,0.245,0.7120000000000001,0.042,-0.9822,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,2,0,1,3,8,13,4,2,6,0,12,0,0,2,1,22,26,11,0,2,2,6,2,4,0,2,0,1,0,0,11,6,0,4,4,0,0,3,4,7,0,1,7,4,24,6,10,16,1,17,2,1,1,0,21,5,0,2,11,77,35,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318659702721925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17503916499816988,0.0,0.18776711197290344,0.1326472419934129,0.0,0.20339939699985612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910247329733229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833169831980652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19617728836354145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204288183843496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814241994452664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14820511396675978,0.19734460582424104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113937877253988,0.0,0.0,0.12581911950236996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061716451510423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796003416660425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535934191297753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14828139582214928,0.4657012997185252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396055290195859,0.0,0.16228933894058958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335513552061028,0.11897392614275505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20629328857829196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20730104585502573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18922009260112987,0.13189917206343954,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LilyRoseJo,2020/01/31,I'm taking depakote I'm taking depakote and I'm scared to death of the potential side effects of liver failure or pancreatitis. Has anyone experienced these? How likely is it?,2.965,6.035513000000003,4.97475,70.79525000000002,90.875,6.3100000000000005,28.275,7.554174236665415,2.80258,144,7,20,3,5,49,25,32,0.287,0.713,0.0,-0.8875,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,2,0,4,7,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,11,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34999633419411313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24454354114558485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5011380661356651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7527029036774509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sorrypardonmewhat,2020/01/31,"I can't remember what anyone sounds like, and I find this really depressing... I recently had a discussion with a friend, after I learned that he hears his own voice in his head. Aka an inner monologue. Unbeknownst to me, this turned out to be a common thing. He said: I haven't seen you for a couple years now, but when I read your text, your voice is reading it out in my head clear as day. That sounds amazing. I can't even remember my parents voices or my wife's. I don't even know my own unless I say something out loud. Am I overreacting? This feels akin to being colourblind or something. It makes me sad that I can't even remember my mom and dad's voice. (They're still alive)",2.5456521739130444,4.378855956521743,3.602246376811596,89.71902173913048,76.39130434782608,7.208695652173913,23.09420289855073,8.07648339933343,1.112220289855073,534,16,114,9,12,172,88,138,0.033,0.8690000000000001,0.098,0.8074,1,0,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,3,0,0,6,5,0,0,5,0,10,2,2,1,1,19,17,8,0,0,4,4,1,1,1,0,0,10,0,0,10,6,0,0,7,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,3,12,23,3,13,12,2,14,0,2,1,0,16,6,0,2,9,74,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909265790958088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263291917353504,0.0,0.10061985099142257,0.0,0.13437960801054213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.309148779960795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888828870511981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425992525049383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054049510696878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202426122482622,0.0,0.1758456313821395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574439089135663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622338370949007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414441475223496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18272848083048926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17324150214156844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3121240026025991,0.0,0.09995026626800536,0.0,0.15405071051483032,0.0,0.5302199899567577,0.0,0.1484105390766471,0.1240731913372118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402232983663941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12459759795319153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365260925580402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16970471857702976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047162309623678
mentalhealth,NousTree,2020/01/31,"Some cases of depression might be caused by inflammation. Cambridge psychiatrist Ed Bullmore argues the case for a surprising and controversial new theory... This is a [podcast interview](http://nousthepodcast.libsyn.com/edward-bullmore-on-the-inflamed-mind-theory-of-depression) on the 'inflamed mind' theory of depression.

For many decades, immunologists thought that the brain was shielded from the immune system by the 'blood brain barrier'. Now, this assumption has been overturned -  the brain can experience inflammation too, and that can be caused by stress as well as illness or injury.

Could inflammation be responsible for \*some\* cases of depression? And does that open up new possibilities for treatment? New hope?",10.649444444444448,14.290542092592595,9.193703703703703,50.52166666666668,58.62962962962962,12.207407407407407,39.77777777777778,11.645159339076185,6.1980666666666675,598,30,70,20,9,184,67,108,0.22,0.684,0.096,-0.9445,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,0,3,8,1,1,8,0,11,7,4,2,0,15,13,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,3,0,0,3,15,5,2,8,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,5,4,48,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4769643330689667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926096763375326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11371098852127726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4906654439257089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463292900880778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13931434228303688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14145545306658852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439178958302815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15108538904516186,0.28760772567129705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4126511228592031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16055744376438946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314192628823793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306577769728984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280529174478194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheowRArelevant,2020/01/31,"I can't finish anything I write I try, but then my head goes, what's the point. Everyone here feels roughly the same way, you all have your own issues to deal with. I just feel so lethargic and distant, trying to get it out there, what I'm struggling with. I used to be such a great writer, I haven't picked up my laptop to write in over 10 months. It's like the words just left me. I feel like I'm always just waiting for life to happen, I can't catch it as it happens all around me.. what a sad and scary way to live.",2.391428571428573,3.0852867142857145,3.3557142857142854,95.93928571428572,74.71428571428571,5.957142857142857,21.142857142857142,5.148860815047168,-0.2670571428571433,400,8,97,1,8,128,73,112,0.13699999999999998,0.758,0.105,-0.5858,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,0,8,5,0,1,5,0,5,2,1,2,2,22,15,6,0,0,4,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,4,14,3,15,14,4,13,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,0,5,61,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668982444376081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16505987001155326,0.17855831493235785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067886971643132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19166234504438756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042571247912493,0.14329406265150074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479453044812516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22113964972000064,0.0,0.0,0.3547436476098733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058524740862912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20935292638748787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21793025587779988,0.0,0.14167526015059753,0.19598606206301186,0.0,0.17711540761599995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010067429129274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18961249727535776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20968928452132105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723606810216755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732363209195896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.318421403503235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,swostikg,2020/01/31,"how do I end this never ending fear In this past 2 years I've gone to make downs in my life first I get this problem with never ending thought which I couldn't stop for 1.5 year and I had my first bike accident since then I have this fear what if I hurt someone ...if I see anything with sharp edge like knife or something I get scared what if I hurt somebody...and after my accident I hadn't rode bike and recently I'm trying to ride again but I really get scared when I go little fast...anyone here familiar with this thing I'm having...briefly like 2 years ago I started having this never ending single thought which I couldn't control at all ,I had my bike accident and my study went 100 to 0 like I've failed my 3 semester now simply I'm going through many shits in my life....can anyone explain or help what am I going through.....I would really appreciate it if anyone could help me.",3.659505494505496,4.6683235219780235,4.5875824175824205,87.1074175824176,72.02197802197801,7.578021978021977,24.98901098901099,7.882392219407189,1.2067890109890107,699,20,147,9,13,227,98,182,0.158,0.71,0.132,-0.6909,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,4,5,12,1,4,0,0,11,2,1,3,4,29,28,13,0,9,7,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,13,6,0,2,3,3,0,7,6,9,0,2,7,2,24,3,14,17,2,35,0,3,1,0,3,6,1,6,25,85,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315452199575424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24410473678693265,0.0,0.09576216607567037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051826604266606,0.09291156008630404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4122752731895072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26189603352657953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19796763915396887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823947497576396,0.0,0.1984063703289372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600001791537207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24915186863122066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16439040925460205,0.1705567484920574,0.11663278953735005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767753100303064,0.11798038701688178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692539489754308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108783539633448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134987557189416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909853639803644,0.0,0.11490082181097315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330122990376101,0.0,0.0927314085309148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11945159814477199,0.0962620357396346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859948210970164,0.08958691040176693,0.0,0.0,0.08236691634219577,0.0,0.0,0.0972900953081013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731071117128681,0.0,0.0,0.18476873580710726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900723769700896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787567309267644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266553923427597,0.0,0.0,0.224814387882916
mentalhealth,ilikecatsandmuseums,2020/01/31,"How do I get my optimism back? I’ve always been someone who was categorized as optimistic. 

Whenever someone would do something questionable to my judgement, I would assume the best of them. Give them the benefit of the doubt. I have always liked believing the best of people, and most of the time this benefits me and helps build my relationships with others. 

I ended up getting burned a few times because of this. There was instances where it led to me ignoring signs of failing romantic relationships, friendships or just general mental health problems. 

Maybe my optimism was a bit childish. Maybe my optimism was blinding. Maybe my optimism needed to be replaced with realism in some circumstances. 

But now I often see myself assuming the worst. When someone doesn’t clean their dishes right away, my mind goes to “wow they’re lazy” instead of what I know I would respond to as “maybe they’re really tired after a long day at work. It doesn’t really matter that they left the dishes there. I know they’ll clean them eventually”. I have good, nice, reasonable roommates. 
I know this isn’t me, and I hate it. 

I’ve been wracking my brain trying to figure out what is at the root cause. Is it because I’m burnt out working on a masters thesis and having a part time job? Is it just me getting used to having roommates (I’ve always had my own apartment)? Is it because I’m home more so I feel more responsible for the chores? Is it because I’m feeling overwhelmed? Or that I just doesn’t know what self care I need?

Or is it because I’ve just lost my faith in people?

I know it would be unreasonable to ask anyone but myself to answer those questions. 

I really want to get back to my old optimistic self. 

Has anyone else ever lost their optimism or positive outlook for life?
If so, how did you work on processing your feelings and becoming more positive again?

Any tips or experiences you’d like to share would be really appreciated!

Thanks everyone for reading, it really means a lot to me.",4.068609625668447,6.475227732620323,4.980213903743317,78.94914438502677,73.81283422459894,8.357219251336899,28.379679144385022,9.088552180705676,2.7020074866310155,1588,65,278,37,34,516,191,374,0.061,0.733,0.207,0.9947,1,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,0,3,7,9,19,22,1,2,15,0,35,7,1,7,1,64,63,20,0,10,12,0,3,2,0,6,4,0,4,2,21,9,2,1,17,1,0,1,4,9,0,0,10,5,44,13,38,43,13,29,1,4,2,0,22,14,0,15,16,195,65,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20115995877049264,0.0,0.0,0.0548006811136801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269405350619767,0.08256903298979076,0.0,0.0,0.0753362586804797,0.0,0.07571242286000797,0.12393004782658262,0.0,0.245619867886286,0.08899999246973883,0.0,0.09079189445144098,0.16913833498569722,0.0,0.08797813768422952,0.0,0.0,0.08995970433314472,0.0,0.0,0.0821619547292038,0.0827831710150183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05197077002565705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731857168894198,0.0,0.07137454444911208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728939026869031,0.0,0.07700258633017545,0.0,0.078827762406312,0.0,0.0,0.12223885454852006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16840970772622316,0.07730464106958003,0.0,0.06759101988620103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956117486877587,0.0,0.08565827070764867,0.0,0.0,0.05401454288841101,0.0,0.08083349916565913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996834983816442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22143751834737926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755602639788801,0.0,0.056919690970440376,0.07873969015678657,0.0,0.0,0.0713153423550706,0.0,0.0,0.1759364717600626,0.06851063244449662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238345511816476,0.0877808778947092,0.0,0.0,0.08121090068292328,0.0,0.08136805261362266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950576957399088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456058331772373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726588953509441,0.0,0.11173522486152716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710912742279427,0.0,0.0,0.1805476733841357,0.0,0.08060698062517536,0.0,0.2581246270510033,0.08285497942221384,0.0,0.17303663557108026,0.0,0.06881929754555806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421594958935314,0.0,0.1681358211015815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20483866706010656,0.06203840331302483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419200046127605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096958750770133,0.09262080195836422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054712042807521434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959971586512374,0.0,0.0,0.04753122300360297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600089741650832,0.0,0.0,0.2862269744600737,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PaulMurrayCbr,2020/01/31,"I'm ok now (depression) On the one hand, I don't want to offer false hope. But on the other hand, I'm ok now.

Fifty goddamn years old. A lifetime of depression. Sometimes bad, sometimes with suicidal ideation. Feeling disconnected form life, from people. Feeling like the future was a blank wall of nothing.

One psychiatrist told me ""you have ADD, that's why the world is so overwhelming"", the next said ""bi-polar! You need to be on mood stabilizers!"" So much for science.

But I finally found it. The magic pill. The elixir of life. I don't know, can't know if it will work for anyone else, but by God I swear it's working for me.

What fixed it for me, and I mean *fixed* it, now I'm ok, just normal, was Vitamin D. 1000 IU - one pill - every day. The big oil-filled capsule of Vitamin D specifically, not the multivitamin with a tiny amount of everything in it. Cheap. No prescription needed, no special secret MLM formulation, no mysteries of the ancients, no nothing. Just go to local pharmacy, purchase vitamin D. I keep it next to my shaving gear, pop one every morning. When I'm about to run out, I get more.

That's it. That's all it took. I wish I knew about it 30, 40 years ago.

If you are sedentary and indoors-y like me, it might be worth a shot.",0.584701119314122,3.0745354493927124,2.5784579661824267,89.51557454155753,91.2672064777328,5.820862110026197,22.244462967373185,7.285733465282438,1.0713592283877111,964,37,198,18,34,321,147,247,0.105,0.738,0.157,0.8891,0,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,0,3,0,2,10,12,0,1,14,3,12,9,2,0,1,31,34,10,1,8,8,0,4,2,0,2,7,1,0,0,16,6,0,1,8,0,3,3,8,4,0,4,7,5,17,7,26,23,5,26,0,3,0,0,7,9,0,4,16,113,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561245949476885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119506170048476,0.13363416833061592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889807679237803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411229220450124,0.0,0.22466693687059008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895200070914024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21977465013114367,0.0,0.11721612665071122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318919621863431,0.09317449068313212,0.0,0.14287244073765895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14300250732382838,0.0,0.0,0.06814083445054575,0.0,0.07412261401428585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12953984731365673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592629516411755,0.0,0.0,0.14335456056609688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842437846016911,0.12743655372606325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14206929871930593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835859844174114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958761930143276,0.19341457141329374,0.0,0.0,0.2774134943117101,0.0,0.1277872235706071,0.25028950653771365,0.0,0.13685740060214793,0.0,0.3535130380898719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041915175057676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406250363168027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579841208772201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266201213654228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462513137112527,0.14490517711318304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692709028830322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176868168556008,0.0,0.14998045355089445,0.0,0.0,0.18989955192689276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797676476089374
mentalhealth,valenrecreo,2020/01/31,"about my old friends that I still interact with. we always doing game night and we are usually on our own discord server, on the server sometimes they would just ignore me and I feel like talking to myself, I feel so shit, and when sometimes I invite them to a game like I would wait for like half and hour I feel like that they don't have respect for my time and to me. idk if the problem is me or them because I am always getting tilted when my oldest friend always bringing up how my ex girlfriend is getting hot and sometimes he tells me that he will talk to my ex or something (he has a girlfriend). and then last night I told him that I have a crush on someone who lives on a different country, he asked for their ig and I told him because there is no problem with that. then this night comes that he told me that my crush followed her back, idk it seems that he looks up to himself too high that it is easy to hookup with my ex and crush. he's a good friend back then, idk what happened.

english is not my first language.

thanks.",2.901569556732646,4.443059753554508,3.2875550599386685,93.5991441315863,74.68720379146919,5.533426261499861,25.207973236688037,5.5289334501034215,0.4384461109562312,812,27,174,3,17,251,109,211,0.127,0.743,0.13,0.5899,2,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,3,0,5,1,11,14,1,0,7,0,15,1,1,1,0,31,32,19,0,5,5,3,4,4,5,3,0,0,0,0,14,15,0,2,4,2,0,3,3,4,0,2,3,5,36,10,19,26,1,28,0,0,1,0,38,7,1,4,22,121,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879176773717532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782782395530603,0.0,0.0,0.1773794931401326,0.0,0.14062103076658555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993556520177588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050630289410012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17495890982135173,0.1647985926546828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09810859428795143,0.0,0.0,0.26733541770785724,0.0,0.12052133086463553,0.0,0.0,0.09674216268370793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199524808902397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12186360058179335,0.0,0.0,0.11358718660746285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401792470421798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253982238361737,0.0,0.101847799456859,0.0,0.09685699435742892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247178167464976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103048188539856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207306166438733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500168490333624,0.0,0.0,0.11839539461617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772765517276624,0.08879477356682718,0.3422241946490047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211109473944304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18541269494524776,0.10081270540700764,0.106190061794286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725598948443265,0.0,0.0,0.3306384522542582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12703129652521464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638692037747164,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,platypus-party,2020/01/31,"Why is self harm bad? Okay, so I’m a mental health professional and a mild self harmer. I basically just use it just to relax or for a buzz- the same way I use having a cup of tea or coffee. Occasionally I will do so when emotional - but even then I am very careful and never are at risk of severe injury.

My thinking for why SH is considered problematic is due to risk of escalation (over time to get same effect) and potential risk of accidental suicide.

Is there a possibility of being a “responsible self harmer” or a moderate self harmer? Or is there a risk I am blinded to in my own situation?",4.665254237288135,5.563194974576278,7.062500000000004,70.699343220339,69.59322033898304,10.30677966101695,29.15677966101695,10.411451182825502,3.0697593220338986,469,17,91,13,8,169,73,118,0.18100000000000002,0.6729999999999999,0.145,-0.865,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,1,8,9,0,4,9,1,12,3,0,3,1,17,18,12,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,1,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,1,7,3,14,16,3,9,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,4,5,64,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694540590931192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16722389605294696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844944378899164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833014849526072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569090022242107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743399339037347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652882195771362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649823148311368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849019067008497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6844123210879265,0.1852899021339747,0.0,0.0,0.18435937092900326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17940543795944602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050939835594975,0.0,0.0,0.09563827818568868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.283312043621747,0.0,0.13532928702564526,0.0,0.1301872177851203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29599547355078976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adhalliday22,2020/01/31,"Help with caring for someone who's anxiety and depression is getting the best of them. I'm just wondering what I could possibly do to care and help my other half out. She has tried several times to overdose. She self harms but not often. She fears I'm going to up and leave her everytime I go to work. I reassure her the best I can, I know about her past and everything, I try explain to see things how I see but that doesn't help.
I've also messed up because I've done things to trigger her, because I never knew the extremes of her insecurities, anxiety, and depression have hold of her.
Any advice would be greatly appreciated, thanks.",3.88608,5.6338504480000005,5.238600000000002,79.76830000000002,72.52000000000002,8.840000000000002,29.3,9.3871,2.7140400000000002,506,21,97,12,10,169,82,125,0.142,0.621,0.237,0.9442,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,3,5,13,0,2,3,0,10,0,0,2,1,22,24,9,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,1,4,0,0,2,3,6,0,1,2,2,19,7,15,19,2,8,0,2,2,0,17,3,0,2,3,69,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459502216272572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944097611836288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015680833582818,0.0,0.2285158461584847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182093643428799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31348253630774336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30455943602248203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192496480099308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572824413879257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15284437015305846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342327075572421,0.0,0.0,0.16806848245918846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803302297099966,0.0,0.16976638717992645,0.0,0.0,0.16466694676342578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30033314275431994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208286417280737,0.0,0.0,0.15814781159320118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519355471224095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257843972152576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16837791055430915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380368560490193,0.0,0.15581223395502228,0.16873123227770218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654995271440514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750813191056202,0.0,0.0,0.1984527024626374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709144073874506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028076006226501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16197161699158966,0.10873389075128273,0.0,0.0,0.10609913822436898,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jimarkus2907,2020/01/31,"I don't know how I can view my girlfriend the same I (17M) have huge anxiety towards the smoking of cigarettes, my mother smoked while I was in the womb and that has made me deeply hate smoking. Over 2 months ago, my girlfriend smoked half a cigarette at a party and ever since this I have not been able to view her the same way. I often lash out in anger at her, telling her that it made me very mad and distrusting of her and this has upset her deeply, she has borderline personality disorder and is deeply insecure about how people treat her. I dont want to hurt her I love her deeply but a large part of me just wants to shout at her and tell her all the ways it hurt me. I twitch when I am around her when I think of her doing it which has a crippling affect on our physical affection.

My mind has no desire to change these feelings, they feel entirely correct but I hate feeling them, I feel like at any point I could scream at her, I hate how these thoughts affect me and I have no idea of what to do because they feel correct. Please help.",4.8704421279654895,4.9595839953271055,5.1113084112149565,87.73681883537027,68.85981308411215,8.640690150970526,27.67649173256649,8.384062270229773,1.5455468008626885,821,24,182,11,13,259,119,214,0.16,0.6990000000000001,0.141,-0.5282,0,0,4,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,3,0,10,14,6,2,9,0,18,3,1,8,4,42,34,15,0,4,4,1,5,1,2,0,1,2,0,1,11,9,0,0,9,0,0,0,5,11,0,1,5,9,43,3,23,28,4,22,0,2,2,2,26,14,0,1,7,130,54,0,0.13904619206503918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325605969850115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945561787013212,0.0,0.10636995634359103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378059044250098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476126810275299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14709243433769406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101707007231072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935898250367508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16296110153822366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577524126755624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3515296628934688,0.09933462739400684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4118379835265061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319973157325936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977036488547426,0.15696622608076174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641615078687397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793094594852735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549461706448609,0.2631377378564283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14039701637196558,0.0,0.11098534392826256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505734760539369,0.0,0.0963971220295784,0.12140977164954513,0.0,0.15263096409959634,0.13144359520256466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502044693990247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430650011476861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890951854361174,0.0,0.11038714488926986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11472767054891785,0.16402609328514656,0.2207367903874507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,augpotarbor,2020/01/31,"You're valuable but simple advice would be so helpful to me please I have caught myself red handed in a ""pattern of behavior"" here on Reddit that is ""something I do so often and it's a classic way I think and do things""....

Please could you take a very quick look at this ""pattern of behavior"" of mine and can you give me suggestions as to what areas of mental health this is. or if you recognize this pattern within some type of condition or within yourselves or if you feel it's related to anything..

I'm undergoing a long term (Probably all of life process) of trying to lessen my symptoms (If it's possible as we all know trying as hard as we like doesn't mean we succeed does it) - if you recognize this pattern then any input would be helpful to me in my overall work with my psychiatrist/doctor/therapist and most importantly my own self because as well as being here offering help and support to other people I have gotten so much help from talking and interacting with the community here on these different boards that we all use.

Here is my pattern I want to ask you about please. Firstly I want to just say I have never ever been banned and never had a post removed and never gotten into any kind problem anywhere on the internet for anything - I am not a controversial person and I am tactful - I don't cause problems in real life and nor do I on the internet - I am ......OK now I'm going to use this as another pattern (I talk to much...I waffle I go on and on and on and on)

​

1. I talk too much...I go off at tangents.....I just confuse people with my thoughts..I go from one thing to another... I just have done it right now.. Look back at this post.... I have now switched to an entirely new pattern..Pattern of talking too much, pattern of waffling and pattern of going off at tangents.......... 
2. Now I'm going to go back on my original request for patterns. I've already messed up this post. Posts are supposed to be small and succinct.. now nobody is going to read this and my mind is full of doubts  and I now want to delete this post and delete my entire ID>..........

3. Here is the original pattern....I'm asking about

​

I have just posted a long post which took me about an hour in all of my time to try to help a girl who is having issues. I will provide the link. I realized after I posted that it was a huge huge post. As with all my posts it's honest and genuine and mindful of not saying anything that could be misinterpretated or whatever.... 

On one of my comments one person took away a point from 2 down to 1 which meant my karma point went from 5 down to 4...that caused me to re look at my post and think someone didn't like it.....then I started to have more doubts.. although this is my truthful and honest opinion and it's totally not even talking to a person who is suicidal it's talking to that persons girlfriend - have I been to harsh - is my opinion going to have some knock on effect...

Then I see that she has not replied to my one post and I've now replied 2 x and not got a reply...so does that mean probably I've done something wrong. Have I offended that person are people going to not like my post am I unhelpful and is this damaging to the community.

Am I going to get banned, will the moderators look at this post and see it has harmful because I've told my own opinion and it might not be poplular but I've tried to be fair and give reasons for my opinion. (Please don't comment on whether you agree or not agree on what I have said because that's not the issue here)

My normal reaction is to delete everything I've written on this post and to permanently delete this account. 

I would go back and delete every other posts I've ever made with this....

I've done this so many times...I always have a new id even though 

Somedays I've gotten 50 karma in 24 hours through posting on one channel like suicide watch..and suicide watch they don't go around throwing karma at you for no reason. My point is that I am not an problem poster I am not a nuisance I genuinely contribute but why why why why do I do this..

I can't bear my words or my voice or anything recorded about me to be put down.....I mean why do I do this... even this post will probably make me delete it.

I even go and learn how to disguise my writing so I can't be traced. I post this..stuff. this is all I post online..there is no other place online I have ever posted why am I so scared...I am not wanted, I am not a criminal, I have no criminal convictions in the world....but I hide all the time..as if I've got something to hide.....

Why do I do it??? Rarely rarely would I do this in fact I've never done this before...it's actually a sign of my overall slight slight slight improvement.

I was going to write to the moderators but I'm too scared becasue they might say something negative about my post..when in the past they've done nothing but made me more effective, and more helpful to anybody in need.

Do you recognizes any of these tendencies at all? What is this linked to? Is it all or nothing thinking? 

I've done it before...even if I get my grammar wrong I sometimes will delete a post.. I am scared to talk normal like ""non formally"" I always seem to want to make my posts sound like i@m a news reader or somnething.... i care about ...OK here's another bullshit thing I do...

​

If my post no matter how small doesn't get a reply from someone else and other comments do I feel like what the hell is wrong with mine and I delete it....I feeel rejected and.......not only that 

If I edit it for spelling or something and then I go away and it looks edited I think and worry to myself that someone is going to think ohhh noooo he's edited it that's suspicious so I'll then delete it...but then you know when you there's a time lapse between someone writing a comment, posting the comment and the system processing the comment well if during that itme I've deleted mine then someone else posts in reply to my comment and it leaves a messed up look where it says ""deleted"" and someone has posted to that ""deleted"" comment and it looks untidy and messy and I'm responsible for that so not only do I then delete all my posts on that post but because all my deleted posts are linked and can be seen by admin someone somewhere has always got and always will have the power to see that I am responsible for messing up the look of that post! 

I therefore often will just delete my entire accoutn permanently. I've got over 100 accounts like this I just make them use them...then something like this happens and I delete..the thing is i get good feedback there's no arguments and I'm not deleting them because of some negative thing....I haven't had a single cross word with anybody on Reddit in my entire life..not even an online disagreement. I don't even go into those ""argumentative areas"" and even if I was I would never ever argue in a public space...so it's not like I want to cover up something and start again...........................

Is this something that applies to people as well? What is this thing that I have that makes me do this....

​

I am not going to put a TL;DR because I don't know how to summarize this condition which has plagued me so long - it's just one pattern but as I caught myself doing it in real time I thought I'd just put it out there and see if a single person reads and can relate..............I'l,l delete this and this account before days end anyway....

​

Thanks to anybody even attempting to read this and any feedback would be a bonus. There is no right or wrong here...just any thoughts or opinions are truly valued!!!

​

TL;DR - I caught myself in a pattern of behaviour that i wanted to share to ask if anyone can relate. I am a serial account deleter for no reason. I suffer paranoia/ocd. Two things I'm addressing here is

1. I go off at tangents when I talk. I talk a hell of a lot. One of the reasons I'm not unhelpful in Suicide Watch..I care about other people ....OH SHIT I'm doing it again..I'm going off tangent on a tangent....flipping heck...
2. I delete stuff and always want to start again. It's a hallmark I do it with relationships, people and places....I love people but I dont' throw them away ever but I think oh they'll not like me because I'm this or that so I'll go and ask another girl out or she didn't like my opinion about this or that so I'll go and find another girlfriend or something like that. Or I'll have a small argument with a friend and think oh that's it broken forever they'll never like me again blah blah ..and so on and so on

[https://www.reddit.com/r/SuicideWatch/comments/ewmr84/my\_boyfriend\_is\_trying\_to\_kill\_himself/](https://www.reddit.com/r/SuicideWatch/comments/ewmr84/my_boyfriend_is_trying_to_kill_himself/)

Update: Since my karma went down to 4 that provoked me to self doubt and since writing all this it's gone back up by 2 points.... now I'm happy again..but that's not the point. What is wrong...I mean I know that you have to sometimes be prepared to say what you believe and feel even if what you say is not believed by the masses..",2.8833588076740098,4.9085105753501415,3.913455948417102,87.00052481369909,76.01960784313725,6.26087416098515,25.06395010834523,7.155898695719597,1.079305903493473,7087,247,1405,79,159,2288,475,1785,0.099,0.773,0.128,0.9929,2,1,9,0,0,5,399.0,4,14,7,8,88,60,5,6,60,2,146,7,2,24,26,284,271,141,4,35,69,0,5,16,3,16,4,9,1,10,123,81,0,2,34,4,5,38,50,25,3,9,39,29,170,35,195,202,29,214,6,3,15,1,93,85,4,50,72,956,293,12,0.0,0.0,0.02010388118778383,0.0,0.0,0.02013133606891942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022734028922635114,0.0,0.0857095921518514,0.1339288941405201,0.15019688821439633,0.07004789705573597,0.10801121145490174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.014404896615099062,0.0,0.06781240479550528,0.018339510280343797,0.07703767742108861,0.0,0.0580667527617381,0.06336446230849356,0.0,0.08790845960031637,0.0,0.0175301751313037,0.046421184166210425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042008763612484346,0.042326386631423185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032896897495905214,0.0,0.0,0.013286123729421223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021523956779030542,0.0,0.021086286888867687,0.03605664451197691,0.1264935954527756,0.024144551147093532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034419458180267294,0.0,0.018246622634489024,0.0,0.0,0.1360695363419185,0.09317520307477306,0.017357470101595773,0.0,0.018515105473270142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031249884219005836,0.014717561241015038,0.0,0.0,0.01882920014128322,0.01752344144987204,0.0,0.0,0.015916500736354738,0.0,0.04305328193100941,0.0395252572013802,0.26928823942396785,0.017279379404278584,0.06590691437312343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018217647200278773,0.021930449651579958,0.01845470375264442,0.0,0.0,0.021898201287151118,0.0,0.0,0.08285163752423948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040576229400037536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043004775746879775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021453066834615318,0.04528770715764768,0.0,0.0,0.02181378492098364,0.0,0.0,0.0436538879354884,0.14090645293999407,0.0,0.0,0.05469446355332445,0.13839911840151042,0.0,0.0,0.01751447475165583,0.01859346292948131,0.03898686564115303,0.05500606755000294,0.020886468242576128,0.0,0.08976334999158621,0.0,0.0,0.02076124856565305,0.043709412970388814,0.04160284768199292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060577255937678966,0.015275590876909191,0.0953338804297844,0.03979369647794796,0.0,0.0,0.04036976805412613,0.0395349747923989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771974133175512,0.031336409271685045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019666256441505516,0.0999763535539734,0.1079294781520047,0.021523956779030542,0.09045609251649568,0.09737436042618364,0.02322485204995541,0.6313707241610634,0.0,0.06663500486529196,0.059137938908804887,0.0,0.06212994090227447,0.0,0.0,0.061820576307360535,0.04689754224859303,0.0,0.08472620341462914,0.0,0.022118068952847663,0.0,0.03518676755071147,0.01959653851097956,0.09829780636929428,0.041250957951869616,0.0,0.06566622362725982,0.018754635013331262,0.04298326388854005,0.0,0.021146921740634303,0.03408318964327375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218780618738274,0.1427388725984047,0.04075039284231136,0.0,0.04374508405809938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716708220344662,0.09013784287918196,0.023378092684978532,0.0,0.021412621926823326,0.015489601533005028,0.14902678377798054,0.0,0.018966894224872088,0.0,0.023919678299796045,0.09580604269600357,0.09240329557126148,0.02024065670476333,0.032710236253962084,0.04805109694771773,0.0,0.0,0.0196854094900476,0.04577756857413093,0.05594767750189249,0.0,0.020124460758853338,0.0,0.0,0.05337868398294362,0.0,0.01699821665052693,0.09720936742323703,0.01635234014512652,0.0,0.0,0.05556908466956501,0.03819519289887241,0.13012617993866782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.014997979944049897,0.02092160367768781,0.0,0.08780736545940024,0.11262134878932027,0.15019688821439633,0.0
mentalhealth,dreamer674688,2020/01/31,"Avoid sleeping due to dark dreams It’s been buried in my subconscious, but I’ve realised lately that the only reason I avoid sleep and procrastinate at night is because of how dark and fucked up my dreams seem to be. I hate sleeping, and I hate my dreams. They’re always ugly, dark, and I wake up in panic a lot of the time like I have today. 

They include: 

- Being back at school and reliving my experience with being singled out; failing in class, bullied and chastised by other students and my ‘friends’ at the time, a source of ridicule. I wake up in panic every time as school developed a painful and severe anxiety deep inside me. I have been unemployed ever since I left school, and haven’t fully recovered from it. It was the worst experience of my life. 

- Jumping off of high buildings. Like last night, I dreamt off of jumping with the intention of killing myself, and becoming a blob summation of organs, nerves and blood on the pavement. Then everything turns back to black and I usually wake up, or I do it again, usually with a celebrity turning into me. 

- Relating to killing my self. Usually arguments with my family; my Siblings telling me that I’m not good enough, that I’m a burden and hindrance on the family, that I’m a loser, that he hates me. Then getting beat up by them - we argue a lot, so I guess this is why. 

- Other stupid things like turning into an Eldritch monster; being an old man; squeezing a dog toy and spiders crawl out of the orifices (I have a fear of insects; namely spiders). 

- And lately I’ve been harassed by a stalker, and I dreamt about a smothered relationship with her. That’s something I can’t go into, but that’s ultimately terrifying. 

It’s weird, to me these are ‘normal dreams’ but after talking someone I’ve recently been fond of , apparently not. I’m concerned about who I really am. Why are my dreams so ugly? I can’t sleep at night because of this. I’m pissed off at looking at this ugliness.",4.352454689097499,6.0873398194070125,5.270469374477184,80.06185983827497,71.2911051212938,8.028292592248349,30.58286086067478,8.641336200584522,2.5380769774142573,1527,66,277,27,29,499,183,371,0.32,0.623,0.057,-0.9991,3,2,1,0,0,1,55.0,1,0,2,3,9,29,12,5,22,0,21,12,9,3,1,45,38,26,2,1,6,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,0,2,20,27,0,2,2,6,0,3,5,23,0,0,5,3,37,6,55,29,5,54,0,2,2,1,14,28,2,5,26,191,57,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723714259456748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653679399964188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13375913875024745,0.0,0.10604014947010168,0.09605872466206926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986998770296921,0.0,0.0,0.0786752350583142,0.07328146305003556,0.0,0.07816888115983082,0.17015943742443684,0.16398743055296652,0.09787275747576626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719783780528077,0.08040838428820972,0.04544163795966976,0.0,0.04943075642999474,0.07295177211486435,0.0,0.0,0.09581443434082246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25761389788125144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189546080136378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19245324888438212,0.0,0.0,0.07089746629046212,0.1962265890673063,0.0,0.09450023532439374,0.0,0.06143408298195833,0.12747699196692305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303836490812506,0.0,0.0,0.14788864124112755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24486469510068265,0.0852185153908164,0.0,0.0,0.09126721884772117,0.0,0.0,0.0661495570703204,0.09254914160332332,0.2040963945716132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055719381070335035,0.08942634077082645,0.08587881317210021,0.09338022437712457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26407462232239337,0.0,0.07918015037341096,0.0907354714132098,0.09825870224842913,0.0,0.07194786993299486,0.0,0.3481573036007231,0.0,0.0736949167943744,0.06695876861277833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990842613820585,0.07602130557262722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05778333014713977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152150111661324,0.0,0.0824435639562124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28381640900703703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28737702171890384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569655484057648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pdallacroce,2020/01/31,"Why do I subconsciously not like women. I don’t know why but I am so uncomfortable around women and stay away from them. Any action where I have to interact with them I stray from. I subconsciously call women it when referring to one. 

I just want some guidance towards allowing myself to be near them without unhinging. 

Please refer me to anyone or any link that you believe is beneficial, or put your own input in. 

Thanks!!",3.6591455696202537,6.359846607594937,4.84099683544304,77.94352056962029,76.59493670886077,8.000632911392406,25.064873417721518,8.841846274778883,2.2635683544303804,338,12,59,8,8,111,60,79,0.10300000000000001,0.78,0.11699999999999999,0.2929,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,16,9,6,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,14,2,13,8,2,10,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,3,2,47,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33939132272167216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17448407166232965,0.0,0.0,0.22214338023456415,0.0,0.0,0.2344509120937372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28114596866377994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548080964997447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714058060012072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12191257047321315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690946667546177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27391983001805825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508564818948595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26597628760135483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22974277563891066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14718507432697375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45034181902055703,0.0,0.0,0.2405475194443069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Somecrazyobsessedfan,2020/01/31,"I randomly broke down crying today and i’m not sure why? So i (16F) take Prozac and its prescribed for depression but i really use it for my mood swings. I ran out a few weeks ago so I haven’t taken it and my dad hasn’t gotten around to getting me a doctors appointment. At first when i ran out i was fine and it was like i was still taking them. But over the last two days i’ve been moodier and unmotivated. When i don’t take them I’m very unreasonable and i usually get angry over small things like my mom making too much noise when she eats or my dog getting in my way. 

Today, however, i broke down crying for no important reason when i usually would just get angry. I had just woken up from a nap and My mom was a little pissed at me because i was supposed to help her with something but i was too tired to get up. When she got a little bit of an attitude with me i felt like crying and I don’t know why. When i asked her to wash the measuring cup so i could make dinner, she got annoyed and i started crying. I locked myself in my room and i only opened it up so she could hand the phone to me. I finally calmed down after i talked to my grandma. And later in the evening i was too mad to exercise because i told my mom i needed and appointment, she said “for what?” And i got angry and said “my meds!”
I’m not really sure why i cried when i normally would have just gotten really mad. Anyway, sorry for the long post but I’m really confused and scared as to why that was my first reaction.",1.3906535303776693,3.1840708984127013,3.555413245758075,88.91857142857144,79.69841269841271,7.011494252873565,20.385878489326764,7.990435384864732,0.8088522167487691,1163,30,256,21,29,398,149,315,0.24,0.6859999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.9957,1,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,2,21,17,4,2,11,0,19,9,2,4,2,47,51,32,0,6,10,4,2,3,0,2,5,2,1,0,8,21,2,0,3,2,0,2,7,9,0,3,23,4,55,7,35,24,3,48,0,3,0,0,20,21,1,3,26,176,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472006396900456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503804404106956,0.07880194921754735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276764307124232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202539201543077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460113194832873,0.0,0.4629558280727547,0.05436157903365346,0.0,0.07260085966534763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627677075572487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862520964223508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05567428848749713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093385487916609,0.0923381265131612,0.0,0.14339802439282498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22019631496882502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022488278480108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056499371487961636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04632485971908574,0.06870949868330717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354292289965225,0.1689661165891096,0.0,0.07459605885834113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253156862555526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362977544760223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29616647175951955,0.0,0.0,0.06196456079596969,0.06250169407213771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825885857055855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410811474987768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072875086633674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159992981753098,0.08666655333312938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16036261572540028,0.0,0.08439132649158924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489235320465178,0.0,0.09435836147694347,0.0596625444909902,0.0,0.06731596302118552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15888904551238334,0.0,0.19013202385093256,0.06775098131174444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056000078061973366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688163256642694,0.15979854416485953,0.08054493286355023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234135751946067,0.0,0.0,0.072801508479745,0.18567218386913528,0.06954999943531594,0.0,0.0669073274709902,0.06761422208671218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042428652478205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975770446343766,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AlternativeUse4Soap,2020/01/31,"I'm taking out my anger and sadness on the only person i have and i dont know how to stop For more than 10 months now, i've been what i've been describing to everyone in my life as a 'rut'. But its essentially just my depression being at it the worst its ever been. I hate calling it depression because my family really doesn't understand how mentally unstable i am, especially nowadays. I never want to get out of bed, I'm disappointed in myself always, to the point where i don't even think i deserve to try or do anything i like. I hate everything i do, even the things i like. I know people say food is comfort, but honestly i hate eating. It just make me feel even more like shit. I dont have the motivation to do not anything I hate where I live, where I work, and what im studying. I can't stand the sight of my family,and i despise talking to them.

Even my brother (who is essentially my best friend and probably the only person i truly look up to) annoys the living shit out of me. I know he hasnt done anything wrong, but inevitably i and up doing or saying something wrong and making him annoyed with me (understandably so). Even when he tries to help me do something beneficial for me, I'm irritable over little and end up acting very uninterested or irritated, which he gets annoyed by, since he was just trying to help. I absolutely understand why he gets angry at me, and as soon as I leave the room I immediately feel bad. Everything i do and am is a disappointment to me and i hate myself so much. I wish i could just push everyone away so they wouldn't have to deal with me, but i know that wouldn't solve the problem either.",4.4773798407031045,5.183629027190339,6.213074704751443,77.31552526778357,69.90634441087613,9.522713540236198,28.640620708596536,9.688023934748609,2.540509365558912,1292,45,259,29,22,447,163,331,0.23600000000000002,0.631,0.133,-0.9893,0,0,2,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,2,3,22,29,12,0,12,0,29,5,2,5,2,52,56,26,0,6,13,1,2,3,1,2,1,2,2,2,11,15,2,1,11,0,0,2,10,22,0,0,5,6,50,7,37,47,6,30,0,5,2,0,20,19,2,3,11,185,61,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071442334367167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20980652428753024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984631268401869,0.0,0.0709590208412115,0.05180613704284166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918663458368725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677930388858446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785369868804597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.087615921445058,0.14639510931057292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696927841385428,0.19920384269634225,0.0,0.0,0.08696098876941348,0.0,0.0,0.07527158659683386,0.0,0.0,0.28065933332211346,0.07687390162455414,0.0,0.16241383787085126,0.15275828222002286,0.0,0.08011640254171662,0.0,0.08594205489425177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276433788551108,0.0,0.06565928870752062,0.0,0.13320364420574166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195260306110021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392746178330265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179850726207164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18682238567512255,0.0,0.0,0.08998696545523804,0.0,0.0,0.06002749973418325,0.12455830265515958,0.08517741119686804,0.15008682634198578,0.0,0.07136609219665929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345644780079285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564500678137191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783430765009682,0.0,0.062473837726727065,0.0,0.06554575952793099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129270018423523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05891797782385549,0.1484114480399606,0.0,0.0,0.08033840289190644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162832741838946,0.08131927715979084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054443640566274036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516714832876872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17447199768881488,0.07030056499005999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085138639686958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105136116792315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638982296339187,0.06830781591809074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05646033385191564,0.05445502987243503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17309794268510795,0.0,0.0,0.2654175043071821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012161988725818,0.05012642246592485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668584731679039,0.0,0.0977286876202864,0.0,0.0,0.06187017557990634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18583576320637696,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,apple_pie_nlue_pie,2020/01/31,"My parents are abusive and always fighting and it ruined my mental condition, I am in a constant urge to slaughter someone, I hate them. They give me money and that's all there is, if I got job I don't think I will even come to their funeral or call them ever. title",3.343,4.390827618181824,5.005227272727275,83.66784090909091,72.81818181818181,6.954545454545455,28.29545454545455,7.1686216300943375,1.5765454545454545,209,8,41,2,4,71,46,55,0.276,0.7240000000000001,0.0,-0.9432,2,0,0,0,2,0,5.0,0,0,4,0,3,3,2,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,2,9,10,5,2,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,12,0,3,8,1,4,0,1,0,0,8,1,0,2,2,32,14,1,0.0,0.3261206524611734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290261252806907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810562086827324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370994398199085,0.0,0.29744236874453905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817969138268532,0.2489751169816507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26404035651916485,0.0,0.0,0.22013879732008307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717477332121235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27313847279251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773825073485726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056273142018484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332144354730261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17636606372530308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yeetsotopia,2020/01/31,"Help me [Serious]
How can you run away from something you cant escape,
Recently A rumor (that was true) about me spread throughout my school. Some people found out and are now blackmailing me and harrassing me every single day about it  My parents still dont know about this and if they would, I would probably get disowened. My reputation is on the line and im slowy losing my sanity. What should I do,",4.499523809523812,6.253076376623375,5.046168831168831,81.74163419913421,70.94805194805195,8.769696969696971,25.82034632034632,9.2995712137729,2.1661878787878788,319,10,60,7,6,102,60,77,0.055,0.909,0.036000000000000004,-0.1073,2,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,1,1,6,3,0,0,2,0,10,0,0,1,1,14,13,6,0,4,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,13,1,7,8,2,8,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,2,4,46,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337823065667404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047361888170913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29162482434727444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20964850987094344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728273033342063,0.0,0.0,0.13000247658585795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16678431289868142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687771801315277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13674948401898168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27837513390212265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27629429496502383,0.0,0.0,0.17250615953197132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682789099541103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24568785149285066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518274461251816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19156012282229487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198714540426236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3535208609800839,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sappapie,2020/01/31,"I know i am attractive but i am still really insecure about how i look. I (M18) know i am seen as an attractive person and sometimes i can see it myself too. But damn, most days i feel like i look like a bucket of shit. It’s like, i know that i am attractive but i can’t process it. This only gets worse when i feel down because then i start sleeping worse and start smoking a lot of weed, and when i do this i look like a crackhead in my head, but other people say they don’t notice. What do i do? This insecurity has stopped me from dating etc.",1.4640517241379314,2.9883724741379325,3.4805517241379316,90.76962068965518,78.56896551724137,6.708965517241379,21.944827586206884,7.554174236665415,0.6727096551724134,421,12,97,6,10,143,68,116,0.207,0.607,0.18600000000000005,-0.5729,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,6,11,2,2,4,0,11,3,3,1,0,16,24,12,0,0,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,9,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,8,21,7,7,23,3,11,0,0,5,0,3,2,2,2,13,68,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482067168311447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089516228589684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19177253442944991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738887404863421,0.12284292811911712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983810447488101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764729131787223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28350185522972826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360292993144924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4331904758658248,0.0,0.0,0.14618789945754376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19576910518553128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13077765428096674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11921023960154008,0.150142324413685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101571994899289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367435605707878,0.0,0.0,0.13702391070093164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650681011510938,0.0,0.0,0.17207672092681944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17006545774728482,0.0,0.2434177840795233,0.0,0.13732151965351222,0.14376002201172314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504686548288365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,buckfruit,2020/01/31,"Struggling for a while now This is my first time posting in here, I guess I just want to get everything out there.  In August, I moved from Wisconsin to Arizona to start college.  I got a dream spot studying musical theatre in one of my favorite places in the world.  My class is pretty small, 16 freshmen, and we have all gotten really close like a family.  In October, everything started to be too much and I started to feel like I couldn’t do everything I needed to, and if I wasn’t cut out for college I didn’t have a point in living.  It has been nearly impossible to find a therapist and my university doesn’t have enough resources available for all of the students that need them so I couldn’t see one as often as I needed.  I checked myself into a mental hospital for the first time.  I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression when I was 10 and have been on various medications since.  I was under the impression that I’d go to the hospital and get my medicine figured out, speak to a therapist and get set up somewhere long term.  They immediately took me off of the medication I had been taking and put me on lithium and abilify.  The whole experience was honestly more traumatic than helpful and I remember crying myself to sleep and praying that I could get out as soon as possible.  All we did was group therapy and random circles where we talked about our problems.  I thought at least some of the stuff I learned was helpful, about taking my mental health into my own hands, but mostly I just wanted them to see me be healthy so I could leave.  They set me up with a psychiatrist and therapist locally and I was on my way.  The psychiatrist upped my lithium dosage and I began to feel nothing like myself, foggy-headed and forgetful all the time.  I expressed this to her and she didn’t seem to care, so I stopped taking them on my own.  Then at my next appointment she scolded me and put me on 1/3 the dose of the medication I was taking before I was hospitalized. (Logic wasn’t her strong suit I guess).  I continued to struggle, getting to appointments without a car.  I went home for winter break and realized I forgot my medication in my dorm.  We called my psychiatrist a few times to ask for another prescription we could pick up for the month away.  No response.  So I was off medication until January, another detriment to my health.  I decided I was done with that psychiatrist and health agency as they were inconvenient and unhelpful.  What followed was weeks of some of the darkest and lowest things I’ve ever felt.  I was suicidal every single day, crying on the phone to my mom, calling crisis lines, nothing changing.  Eventually I was able to get an appointment on campus with a psychiatrist, hoping to get stabilized before I looked for a more permanent solution.  If you haven’t been through a med change or pharmaceuticals in general, it’s a long, often irritating process.  My mother flew out after an especially awful breakdown where I expressed how I had no choice but to die because things were never going to get better and kept getting worse.  We vowed to take a week to figure everything out and make a plan.  So we went to countless meetings with mental health professionals and university staff.  We decided I would take a reduced credit load, enroll in an intensive outpatient program, and start seeing a therapist close by weekly.  You have to understand that being in a deep depression like this, I have no motivation but am just going through the motions trying to make something work.  After my mom left I started thinking about just how much was on my plate now and how much more responsible I had to be.  I realized there was no way I was going to continue being in school if I was really going to get my mental health back to where it was before.  We talked with the director of my program and he gave me the opportunity to take a medical leave, and rejoin next years freshman class in the spring semester where I left off.  This was one of the hardest decisions I’ve ever made.  I decided it would be the best for me in the long run.  I leave Sunday and each day I just get sadder and sadder about it.  I want to be here in Arizona, doing what I love, but I just can’t and it breaks my heart.  I don’t want to leave all my friends, even though I’ll be back in the fall.  I feel like I’m not a part of anything anymore and that I’m just a failure.  The cold winter back home is gonna kill me, not to mention that my only couple friends there are in school.  I don’t know what I’m gonna do but I just keep praying things will get better no matter how much they look like they won’t.  Here’s to sunnier days ahead.",6.079923733984137,6.575785965324389,6.838981899532236,74.98160280658941,66.3042505592841,10.170721984950172,32.8093552979459,10.104522489648273,3.2811604474272933,3679,148,679,82,55,1219,366,894,0.12,0.7659999999999999,0.113,-0.8891,3,0,1,0,0,1,76.0,10,2,8,11,45,27,2,2,49,1,72,17,3,9,8,149,148,62,3,19,20,3,5,6,2,6,13,1,3,0,24,60,0,4,22,1,2,17,21,7,0,5,48,12,118,20,125,81,27,132,2,2,5,1,46,58,0,14,56,513,142,18,0.04696173546523739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848694860889468,0.0359255990909841,0.0,0.04657342258676217,0.0,0.0,0.03864550688870528,0.0,0.04390288329169925,0.0,0.04412209635539,0.10833202739350284,0.0,0.02862743805653912,0.0,0.11988293395698785,0.0,0.0492834440619325,0.08306767742809906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590636509360433,0.0,0.047880619142409785,0.0,0.09935857843663187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248537337339506,0.05196226706580101,0.1031705225107006,0.09085930298290867,0.0,0.08089614788500779,0.04766517296045037,0.048738867111076216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04805816014723557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048524026398775996,0.0,0.031017783368113713,0.0849591566768049,0.03956728757250482,0.0,0.16882471890388814,0.045937588535529816,0.04427134470920091,0.0,0.07123579348048005,0.06709894639952804,0.04509063063018918,0.0,0.04292217543165505,0.07989125639263449,0.0,0.0,0.07256504065364154,0.0,0.2944268220772153,0.0,0.1334471824925645,0.0,0.03755958988772906,0.0,0.10346729225566036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481962890483433,0.2495906438489689,0.0,0.055649882638246745,0.06295492274290072,0.0,0.09421289939499301,0.04664359959348646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04174174824290818,0.05195620233231338,0.0,0.02580894165621073,0.0,0.0,0.19890278847352935,0.10204812598232782,0.0,0.0,0.13765879091658453,0.0,0.041468072794682787,0.12467897426130738,0.07887206035098193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042384799765943885,0.044436329584467735,0.06269464617379633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216390133645006,0.283854047136472,0.1893055353235896,0.0,0.0,0.11000203399094907,0.03748440920726187,0.0499128927576734,0.13808911621394693,0.10446459539245233,0.036219785489949516,0.0,0.09988867687310596,0.0,0.0,0.09012210348780962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546746199153433,0.035716515998160274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05085498312113916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04906501826529253,0.0,0.04439401938900446,0.052942300606640805,0.04497636115300852,0.0477769680168024,0.0,0.044936038519322805,0.0,0.09441903012186917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060169780525986864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05319849163890533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09505556691643834,0.11226726902822066,0.042752200208118055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0388472328660283,0.0,0.0469956506689552,0.0,0.0,0.03615343830394942,0.0,0.0,0.16619879036510474,0.0,0.0,0.0392621136562538,0.0,0.09818920478841033,0.053759951610925394,0.05136851640087165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471656642683791,0.07549212817606978,0.0,0.0,0.053704837260327626,0.2181047778023415,0.09359787096231112,0.030091183854356187,0.0461396666568413,0.03728237228264337,0.10953506242421022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05217621604821818,0.03188393573161937,0.0,0.0,0.04888882281386614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079699325603007,0.07455207944689496,0.11300961450599313,0.0,0.0,0.0870679985315393,0.0,0.052431100546678586,0.0,0.045269437155050725,0.0,0.03418870273026277,0.0,0.04785802049238023,0.06672053895297993,0.0,0.0,0.03024181793863511
mentalhealth,mildly_manic,2020/01/31,"Love you too, Mommy Dearest So I was recently in the emergency room, my sister came to visit me and sent a picture of me on a gurney, with a c-collar on, to our mother, telling her that I received a head injury at work and that we were waiting on more tests.  Our mother replied with...nothing at all, left on read.  Love you too, Mom.",2.9632352941176485,3.9866335588235313,4.464000000000002,87.28100000000002,73.70588235294117,6.616470588235294,26.835294117647056,6.742157984588678,1.1359788235294122,254,9,53,2,5,85,50,68,0.075,0.76,0.166,0.8225,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,3,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,5,0,2,3,1,0,1,7,7,3,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,11,2,11,3,2,14,0,0,0,2,16,9,0,0,1,38,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32529764095751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918942215926533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30902024706427583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.513395465888714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3331061241373767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729060863947468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844942843191641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28082778813121906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24859327121842575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070591941363524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dieabittis,2020/01/31,I think I want to kill myself Really need somebody to talk to,2.823076923076921,4.085766692307693,4.910769230769233,83.0092307692308,74.38461538461539,8.276923076923078,20.69230769230769,8.841846274778883,1.2693692307692306,49,1,10,1,1,17,10,13,0.313,0.6,0.087,-0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5840142855955587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39141182579087136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381695525355109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4242850643975528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382402957210895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113537169666881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stuckinmyhead1997,2020/01/31,"Should I see a psychologist? Hey guys, I am posting on this sub because I am truly frightened with whats happening to my life right now. It seems I am having a complete psychological breakdown, and I am unable to trust any of my thoughts. I feel like someone who is so far from the norm. I talk to people and analyze their way of thinking, and conclude that I think so differently. Right now I can't even think straight. I can barely understand anything people are telling me, and I feel much of my previous knowledge no longer exists within my brain.

It seems I have been stuck in my head for as long as I remember, and am constantly thinking about how I appear to others. It has gotten so bad that I have almost gotten into fatal motorcycle accidents in the past due to not focusing on the present moment. I can't enjoy any experience at all. All experiences require my 100% attention to myself and how I'm behaving. Why the hell do I think like this? Why am I so different?

I can't even communicate properly when I talk to people. Its like thoughts are racing at a million miles an hour and I try to tell myself ""be present"", but it distracts from my thinking pattern and I'm unable to formulate a sentence that can communicate the thought that I have. 

 I have no idea how to behave in society, possibly due to me isolating myself for the past 4 months due to depression. I have developed extreme social anxiety to the point that I am completely clueless when someone is speaking to me. Its like I can't understand whats the best thing to say next. 

My question is, should I see a psychologist? I've tried to do so in the past but I wasn't able to properly communicate the thoughts that I had with her. Being in situations where I am being listened to or being evaluated gets me so fucked up that I don't know what to say or do anymore.",4.878635097493039,6.018529587743733,6.1819877437325905,76.31753871866297,69.27855153203342,9.532300835654596,32.74440111420613,9.791249743138472,3.2563819721448466,1458,66,273,34,25,492,174,359,0.122,0.821,0.057,-0.9722,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,3,17,13,2,1,16,0,39,4,2,4,2,49,68,25,1,2,5,0,2,4,0,2,1,4,0,1,21,11,0,1,23,0,0,1,9,6,0,1,10,8,48,7,43,52,4,40,1,1,2,1,15,19,2,7,22,203,69,1,0.09251823283790674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926436459561189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583114183032892,0.0,0.07077619488745944,0.0,0.09175322658443637,0.0,0.0,0.07613462256127228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724885993048478,0.05639825601479718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709217744201556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328094546376544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19400721379500915,0.0999793419934125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968581837499447,0.0,0.0,0.1933237236270665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221484045840465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181001169144958,0.0,0.0,0.0935599967694078,0.06609504402541759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553161543970236,0.048336958108565815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916075962053737,0.08181356775240481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495039840251224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111182296653247,0.0,0.0,0.1044418235159911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05084560120689706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653483639426156,0.1807989411526022,0.0,0.0,0.08187572468254611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384717077578934,0.0,0.0680115464201687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839419021958126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649573657001094,0.19242148055370686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745963456744024,0.1043004064048144,0.08860689265702355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364159457072776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480512245372572,0.15802013066507295,0.0,0.14714842432532424,0.0,0.0,0.1474501063916524,0.1684502488676278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399437007180734,0.0,0.09431068728245184,0.1567807969010898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872530205347292,0.16173002681302415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146500289392345,0.35569168728013223,0.0,0.2937965699456233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562761408127204,0.0,0.0,0.1926294864299717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343666685746365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669666296912826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KindSparrow,2020/01/31,Lonely i feel lonely even when im around people.,1.939,4.171886900000004,3.6500000000000017,86.70500000000001,80.0,4.0,10.0,3.1291,-1.4920000000000002,39,0,7,0,1,13,8,10,0.455,0.545,0.0,-0.6124,0,4,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5030340332996394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732248387714528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857174675247757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6103749101588708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3917498932560156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ra_wattt,2020/01/31,"need help So guys i need your help because i can't figure out the shit that's happening to me for the last 5 or 6 years or to be honest may be it is happening since childhood but it was not a big deal at that time. Right now i am a 3rd year CS student and the reason for being in CS is that i really like everything about it and when I say everything i really mean it. But for the last 5 or 6 years i have realised that i want to work a lot but just cannot get started with it even though i like it and like to work. And even if i start to work i can't work more than a few hours and after few hours i feel like i should call it a day and i just then waste rest of the day. I faced this issue during childhood as well but it did not matter a lot as i was good at academics and did not needed to put much effort but now things have become complex and when i need to put effort and moreover i want to put effort in the things, i just cant. And for the past few months there are also some weird things happening to me. Like the memories from the dreams messes with memories from the real life. During the day random thoughts, memories and feelings pop up in my head and i feel it has already happened to me already but i can't figure out whether it has happened in the dream or the real life. And now when i look at my childhood memories i can't figure out whether those events actually happened or are they just the memories from the dreams.",3.5661400651465804,3.8949815993485366,4.656434853420198,89.01826791530945,71.76872964169381,7.833811074918567,25.121986970684038,7.734863291789972,1.0409011074918566,1129,30,257,13,20,371,133,307,0.023,0.826,0.151,0.9887,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,1,7,18,11,1,0,21,0,24,5,3,1,0,64,45,36,0,8,21,0,3,5,0,2,2,1,0,1,19,18,0,0,10,3,0,3,9,3,1,0,5,5,30,8,36,35,9,43,0,0,1,0,8,13,1,11,32,187,49,6,0.0,0.0,0.0861512678515964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19484450756205265,0.0705997150682991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05381636922107008,0.09750140525361282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014659894354744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17080528780955204,0.09101567974914344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661990003162567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15868575784237327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339152932976384,0.06306924263795513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04612411390720075,0.0,0.0,0.07404741549467267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741384165406839,0.4684090765112945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090603611870137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183481860977076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388152938222798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214429591134317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439245131883431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247134904670088,0.2156525586822694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741353088022036,0.0,0.0,0.1501097416479766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096165839025661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046648051242207,0.0,0.06489800841507297,0.26184227989323444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427591222334986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26624576271014805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20097028459833832,0.1131124314492266,0.0907694113420494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753930200785118,0.0,0.07020601782183335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09062101502177472,0.07302843597132598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497402594977447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17595348812092634,0.0,0.08673739269429602,0.07008667377910263,0.05147840465528283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414295344687542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937683032310493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570836895271462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705536664043408
mentalhealth,ImTrashySpamy,2020/01/31,My shithead brother Well the title explains it but my fucking asshole of a brother keeps body shaming me and I’m trying my fucking best to get my physical and mental health all together and he’s not helping I’m trying to not care but I can’t and I’m starting to get really pissed because he doesn’t know how much I’ve struggled will my physical and mental health and sorry if this doesn’t make sense but I’m really upset and just feel like jumping off a bridge or to go far far away from my fucked up life,3.3684905660377367,4.6535433490566085,4.7171226415094365,84.84285377358493,73.05660377358491,7.186792452830187,28.34433962264151,7.645422480735847,1.7120981132075468,409,16,81,5,8,136,67,106,0.23600000000000002,0.674,0.09,-0.9585,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,3,11,4,3,3,0,4,8,2,2,1,22,21,13,0,1,8,2,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,7,0,1,3,0,0,2,5,7,1,0,0,1,8,4,9,20,3,8,0,0,0,3,6,5,4,2,2,46,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235217640847374,0.0,0.0,0.10533785240034553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18134393116574052,0.0,0.0,0.19194289509081747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17618208035588587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737335005258785,0.12344902987987927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.479255068475164,0.18056272369081344,0.0,0.0982067594374398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3673586487249688,0.0,0.0,0.11582483117541928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535934199441741,0.0,0.0,0.09496688042505627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205441802642344,0.08442181338140467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534597283738987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34828541937810115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702857755827265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22140142081487516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19343651088906047,0.12230939851494252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18064906717956014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23464099787107925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15536880242208653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1TristKonto,2020/01/31,"Can someone explain this to me Background: i have major depressive disorder and GAD. But last night I realised that I am actually 21 years old, it clicked. I remember being 17 at most, I dont remember being all the ages inbetween. I remember stuff happening but not being those ages. It took me like 20 figuring out that I’m actually 21 and that the year is 2020.


I had a panic attack I’ve never felt before. Nothing seems real, like time froze or something",3.498750000000001,5.763828647727276,5.461363636363636,75.49954545454547,75.02272727272728,8.945454545454545,30.318181818181817,9.516144504307137,3.3276090909090907,363,17,63,10,8,125,65,88,0.136,0.7909999999999999,0.07200000000000001,-0.6956,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,1,3,0,9,0,0,0,2,18,15,5,0,0,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,7,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,3,9,2,3,9,3,12,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,3,11,41,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.32094131548184224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18707533341997687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399271467712024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14163275936829758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18846358862335166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19272358243878568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15788911103377584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541459937085152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340413314413418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067509532125876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682700713911466,0.0,0.0,0.15431670303422987,0.0,0.1577855377637741,0.0,0.1725531273737868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19293603778924376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871698151409032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5588386613236381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970087557565492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933029323088458,0.12659468618749464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882455590094328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588684717578952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18269995903414651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21178917587280413
mentalhealth,kaustavmonihazarika,2020/01/31,"DO I HAVE MALADAPTIVE DAYDREAMING ? hi i am a 17 year old and my family has a history of mental illness ,i am diagnosed with ocd and i have high anxiety(not diagnosed), and i had a pretty bad depression phase this last year. Ever since i was a child i spent most of my time imagining vivid scenarios, talking and making hand expressions , i remember neighbours calling me crazy,my parents think its pretty normal , but still i am considered creepy or weird because i spend hours on the field imagining scenarios, talking , having arguements or you know going to award functions for awards i haven't recieved making speeches and stuff. i remember having imaginary friends which i could see when i was a child, i don't know if it's a hallucination or not. My daydreams do not interfere with my real life, like i can differentiate between things that are real and fake but still i find myself talking and being in scenarios where i am the hero or the centre of attraction, i also think i have an obsession with mirrors, if anyone have watched Joker or King of comedy , my daydreams are vivid and like thos of Arthur and Rupert.i am concerned .Any insight would help me",7.4155471289274155,8.176408178403758,7.585915492957749,69.85813651137597,63.460093896713616,11.248681834597328,36.572408811845435,11.051253699011982,4.420470133622247,934,43,152,25,13,303,128,213,0.07,0.737,0.193,0.9825,2,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,4,6,12,0,1,10,0,25,5,1,2,1,43,34,20,0,5,11,1,1,2,2,1,4,1,0,2,7,12,0,1,10,0,2,1,4,5,0,0,4,6,29,7,13,27,1,15,0,1,4,0,13,4,0,8,12,111,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817083069941492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919843784475206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457996010118473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112940060196967,0.08245587617794085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13811999783592688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10799755582258587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650296369700712,0.2745808822895537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223543247092054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751516605723545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362914123473155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450488086231614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687383225959711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066482484790006,0.14291418439179995,0.0,0.0,0.13320811180586448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867546954674898,0.11025847720866057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554119198773783,0.13216663207520454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18057997267225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631462366290234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253031777580287,0.0,0.0,0.14193715369166973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019502388510286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752248909714109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3079208267323653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3064562208303389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10778815316438488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118920462505442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21604452708235575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15484528879628487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261610187227379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986360618258127,0.17334383363555572,0.0,0.0,0.07887371484793626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960878945500981,0.0,0.0,0.17421157914438887
mentalhealth,dkhet,2020/01/31,"Got diagnosed again. not surprised by the results. Hello, Im a 22F in uni and ive been seeing my therapist in school since 1st year. I did not really have a clear diagnosis back then but i knew i was very suicidal. 

Today, I went to see my therapist again after seeing another psychiatrist who diagnosed me. They said I had history of Major Depressive Disorder and currently have, Social Anxiety Disorder (Performance Anxiety). 

To be honest, before i did not believe i had depression or anxiety and thought i was just overreacting but after these 3 years i begin to really know what was up with me and why i kept ruminating stuff in my head. 

Its a relief imo, that i wasn't feeling guilty over something stupid or overreacting. It feels good to have a name for it and not feel dumb. I have been feeling like this since i was 13 and cant believe ive only known about what i had at 22 but better late than never i guess. 

They told me im in remission and at high risk of the MDD coming back but thats alright, i know how to deal with it now and hopefully i can keep it up. fingers crossed.",3.689715458276336,5.3244443627906985,5.5330506155950765,77.91916552667578,72.81395348837209,9.709986320109438,28.461012311901502,10.056822442137396,3.031123119015049,858,34,165,25,17,295,128,215,0.14800000000000002,0.698,0.154,0.6674,1,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,2,8,13,2,1,6,1,21,4,2,2,2,40,42,16,1,1,11,0,5,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,13,11,0,2,9,0,0,3,7,5,0,0,19,9,27,8,24,22,1,28,0,2,3,0,9,10,1,4,16,116,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939322993907475,0.26131015572442057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510422567389142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688736021620696,0.2565648065855933,0.0,0.10070083855539637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808120547029577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738573436082618,0.1961366967307553,0.2311331211185013,0.0,0.0,0.2609892364695548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302862552799008,0.08134235093384737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550123966903812,0.09106507644360066,0.0,0.1254307742288793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685427768526215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030044195046433,0.0,0.1130897055926924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459789273561016,0.0,0.0,0.10120492545292266,0.0,0.0,0.12515010157867112,0.0,0.1284402144642098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05562675362636644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781665466189408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865964529802859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458845977704301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830792456337814,0.0,0.0,0.1152334529411795,0.2721975257645003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18837406058701334,0.0,0.0,0.11606699314386405,0.0,0.087655792640158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13034365171949422,0.12454549921398425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26440289048222154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039294870008427,0.0,0.0,0.10792695409996282,0.10879910474253997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394728388718901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555032637159252,0.10274188017309703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466455555349394
mentalhealth,AsilaVista,2020/01/31,"What’s wrong with me? Please help. I need advice please

———Sexual abuse trigger warning ———

I’m not sure where the issue is but I’m not sure who to go to help. 

I’ve been married for over 10 years and a mother for 4 years. I’ve recently lost some interest in sex. It’s rare that I would be on the same page as my husband, where as we were also in sync and never had any issues. 

I’m also realizing my daughter is at the age when I was molested. It gives me horrible flashbacks that I had never experienced before. I tried explaining this at the time when I was 5 but I never had the courage and scared of the consequences, I was very close one time but I was brushed off. 


I told my mom recently what I experienced and she initially reacted by asking me “who else knew” I was very upset and I yelled at her for only caring about what others think. 

It was a secret I kept to myself for years and I regretted sharing it with anyone. 

I tried telling my husband through text but he said we should talk in person. I’m really not ready to talk about this in person but it really hurts and I don’t understand why this is haunting me years later. 

I’ve had therapists before but they seemed condescending when they started by asking how my overall childhood was and why I care about what my parents think. I couldn’t even get into getting molested. I lost my trust for people after that. I don’t know where to go.",2.1680905640622967,4.293256399293288,3.800251276010997,86.48534223269208,78.64664310954062,7.0194477162675035,22.848972647559233,8.045849151850463,1.2723446931029962,1103,35,223,20,27,367,146,283,0.17600000000000002,0.727,0.09699999999999999,-0.972,1,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,2,0,2,2,13,17,2,2,8,0,22,1,0,3,5,48,49,22,0,5,9,6,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,2,18,14,0,1,9,0,0,2,9,9,0,1,19,5,39,8,33,26,3,36,0,4,0,1,30,15,0,2,19,153,57,0,0.0,0.1253761972954258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340344101545636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16924411338580805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195939272646938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398991663413701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978497826946981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18008545721701624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21577557969648148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839677608934468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698913287571345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057034375249752,0.10150959647317233,0.12027682046279428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185421150459393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327960836758112,0.0,0.0,0.22089153830136726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581544207966278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310241662878037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393194301431552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846218724922949,0.2448384758976635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170454114954307,0.08047882506823632,0.0,0.0,0.11749758917462018,0.0,0.0,0.07336039227789673,0.1847911698410992,0.0,0.2323112384343645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557854415572046,0.0,0.20896363599224105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065648435305076,0.0,0.10594157741951048,0.0,0.0,0.09633209582951972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489802967923695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19946310617525276,0.0,0.0,0.1701038751322704,0.09248898441050096,0.0,0.0,0.12286204133268012,0.0,0.13560690643150125,0.0,0.0,0.12340583734609535,0.0,0.0,0.10111296498655603,0.0,0.1436860015329634,0.0,0.0,0.11015954129545552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746207094028266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19096730910017173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516957397429108,0.11569460622732232,0.0,0.2725714877402074
mentalhealth,fair_use_is_a_lie,2020/01/31,"I wonder how much further I could be now, had I been diagnosed as a child Diagnosed with ADD in September. Age 24. 

Didn't realize that someone could work on a project for 20 minutes without getting distracted or that they didn't have to do multiple things at once to stay on task. 

Didn't realize that not everyone spaces out in the middle of a conversation and loses half of it. 

Didn't realize that not everyone forgets what they were told minutes after happening. 

It's like wearing glasses for the first time.

I was 3 the first time someone suggested it. I have always been told 'i fly under the radar."" Why my psychiatrist says is a Hallmark phrase for this type of ADD.

I have the absent minded variety. But it was shrugged off. I wonder if the quality of work issues, the deadlines, instructions, etc. would have have made a differ in where I am at now is something was done. 

I'm not mad, but curious.",4.670755968169765,6.217693281609198,5.7024137931034495,78.0185809018568,70.20689655172414,9.491777188328914,32.350132625994696,9.851270322608157,3.3625628647214865,717,33,131,18,13,237,107,174,0.026000000000000002,0.9420000000000001,0.032,-0.0028,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,5,4,4,1,1,12,0,25,3,1,2,0,25,33,7,0,4,8,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,11,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,8,3,0,3,15,1,12,1,23,14,2,23,0,1,0,0,8,14,0,4,9,100,23,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505103973421292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23998429654200096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050768111289036,0.0,0.15701819987915372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537960457901406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676100217478912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2872118350490856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556685334758961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851889056805286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289852784912148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15686085377574085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342276402300799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813300215317264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422054393797199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15174729070347487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047842850878398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600510272500412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195144613869906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546758157060629,0.11569847526060707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018622299954596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984417772325192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17526741998246026,0.0,0.0,0.2872118350490856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356108766277867,0.0,0.0,0.1448715558036726,0.3259602456877693,0.21882183065268496,0.0,0.0,0.1067597576823342,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,A-Cocopuff,2020/01/31,"Kinda just had a mental breakdown Not really sure why I’ve been on a downward spiral in my life, I’ve become very reclusive and kinda just gave up on my hobbies. Today I  just cut my hair out of impulse and it honestly felt really cathartic. I’m not sure the cause of this, I’m not any more stressed than usual and I just started my first job that I mildly enjoy and yet I never have felt more unfulfilled. I feel like a huge part of me is just missing and I’m no longer myself. I’m not asking for help or anything I really just needed to vent.",1.0444736842105264,3.2115531842105263,3.2272807017543883,88.84513157894737,82.94736842105263,5.5543859649122815,20.026315789473685,6.816661863887847,0.4318210526315789,429,12,87,5,12,146,73,114,0.139,0.745,0.11599999999999999,-0.1759,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,1,1,4,0,4,2,1,1,3,27,16,6,0,1,11,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,5,4,12,5,11,11,3,13,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,3,7,57,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935629786670466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15653506390786484,0.0,0.17783026268997434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21008332929599388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19540860278643232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618107754939227,0.1358933897936564,0.3652825549769396,0.0,0.0,0.1618012536504684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750062876979404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887642538623873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435819318338788,0.0929320093004344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19169727903511688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410459104854437,0.1467095891050519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059900017827818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36557990300459625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13463887714623327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178966620030576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3585606826047221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803065620106808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095007392552999,0.15695163371562534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17164419530793404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kenziejb42,2020/01/31,"I OBSESS WAY TOO MUCH AND THEN QUIT BC IM EXHAUSTED OVER OBSESSING. i have a tendency to be 1000% down for something like 1000% focused on something. i obsess over this thing whatever it may be so much to the point that i tire myself out and want to quit bc i feel like i literally did nothing but think about this one thing all day. for example. diet and exercise. i get obsessed with the idea every few months, that in the long run i’m going to have a 6 back and a fat butt and everything will be perfect. i’ll treat my body like the temple it is i’ll focus so hard on being perfect or the best at this thing and i wear myself out. i slip up and eat a whole bag of takies and then i hate myself but instead of forgiving myself and moving on i quit completely. i seriously need to learn balance in my life. luckily it’s not all about food for me. i get obsessed over random things. another example is painting i’m gonna paint everything i’m gonna paint my whole room my door my ceiling all these canvases are gonna be so pretty and aesthetically pleasing and everything is gonna be great. i make one bad art work and i’m done. try to get into reading i have this great expectation that i’m gonna read so much expand my horizon and broaden my knowledge.. i don’t read for a couple days and i quit. i’m gonna start a youtube channel i’m gonna make such good content that no ones ever seen. i make one video that flops and i quit yet again. i’m gonna save my money and stop buying unnecessary things. i slip up spend a little too much and i quit so i spend my whole check instead of just moving on i have to like start over.. luckily this thought pattern doesn’t seem to really affect my relationships but it is quite exhausting that i get soo overly obsessed with things that i completely tire myself out. can anyone relate to this obsessive compulsive thought process? does anyone have advise on how to just stop making something so important that i quit bc i pressure myself too much? i literally just become overwhelmed with what i could become that i have to be better and i’m not quick enough so i quit. idk. tldr:i tend to overly focus on things and set these great expectations for myself and within weeks i quit :(",2.052719623855481,4.3211330000000014,3.6229368968077225,86.85944865132393,79.80178173719376,6.663716901756991,22.895372432566198,7.793537801064563,1.1834403464488985,1763,58,354,30,45,583,199,449,0.11199999999999999,0.7,0.18899999999999997,0.9934,0,0,3,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,15,24,29,1,9,12,0,26,13,4,6,6,67,64,34,0,5,9,0,2,4,0,10,7,0,2,0,29,27,4,2,9,7,5,4,5,14,0,4,5,3,50,15,48,41,14,48,0,1,1,1,3,26,1,4,20,234,79,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628954580632886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388041933399268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04612179638743681,0.05008174881229042,0.0,0.132488919456133,0.0,0.0,0.06294650881145811,0.05304844647833815,0.0,0.06662552785451842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577817404421854,0.0,0.0,0.04789006180460057,0.06636799363312447,0.0,0.07736574996164934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05248990225780474,0.06138153407803474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061375683378776136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061976554468060635,0.0,0.0,0.05425637763515556,0.05053669976266892,0.0,0.16172155058889207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030328268024283712,0.042850540391107465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252943594529505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253506859012207,0.0,0.03408866571125381,0.05030933678284079,0.0,0.19838826502075585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053731322439129384,0.0592189605668148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771140927558551,0.06478992702464406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042366455002874136,0.11721502640273175,0.06011686268316167,0.0,0.053081423869109384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16015151428341035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047876375918292295,0.1275009246443096,0.22046520733221545,0.04447525735750809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05755352420352035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16257909870384218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584128277988611,0.05670156755145483,0.0,0.0,0.0610223858234245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6379732857769932,0.17999212360521458,0.0,0.03842545597364262,0.0,0.0,0.06439730003609842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054604579658185534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13852924239046108,0.0,0.0,0.08490992317033716,0.0,0.0,0.1002938422937376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27894164223461604,0.03843349436486531,0.0,0.09523665482681566,0.0,0.13787900009987689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040723258686066036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03537843207299728,0.0476102392511292,0.048113254736158836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20090041161136354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043666986320160604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VividDuckling87,2020/01/31,"Rough Day Generally, I keep this to myself but.... I need to let it out. 


Today, for the second time in a year I had to conduct CPR. Luckily this time the person survived. So I was numb all day to it logic and was able to function, now that I’m home finally and relaxing....... as I’m slowly spiraling I’m letting stupid stuff hit..

For instance my mom died in 2018, I did the same thing went numb took care of everything even planned the funeral and helped with the burial. But now my siblings (who I checked in on daily) have decided I’m a controlling and manipulating bitch Bc I’ve FINALLY taken time to take care of me and my mental health. I stepped back on contacting them daily - a phone works 2 ways, I realized they never once checked on ME. Ima recovered cutter - 15 years clean! But I almost slipped up 2 different times, have gone through an eating disorder, all without any support from my family. From my husband and his mom (parts that I shared anyways). But you know it’s hard to open up. 

Sorry to just unload, I needed to get it out before I had a breakdown. And I know this is all over the place I apologize again.",2.8631743421052636,4.657728611607143,4.4427161654135325,84.20886278195492,75.38392857142857,7.9300751879699245,26.968045112781954,8.6894789155246,2.0504857142857147,875,34,176,18,19,293,139,224,0.128,0.7859999999999999,0.086,-0.8228,1,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,1,2,4,8,9,2,0,11,0,10,4,0,2,4,34,29,13,3,2,6,3,2,0,0,0,3,0,2,1,12,11,1,2,5,1,2,4,2,4,0,1,9,2,26,5,30,17,5,34,0,0,0,0,14,13,1,1,16,115,38,1,0.12633012349332526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650137033003453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590881601998418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714006707321704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749763043956727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257603960725642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14168997556620025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629449572456693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13111072323178466,0.13198809105436307,0.14478526625197485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926725468357636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343985511957072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135373691824141,0.0,0.11909279733643785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767769506385705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600227544169948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316697688495535,0.0,0.0,0.1342830138105051,0.0,0.0,0.08467641885286101,0.0,0.1267194141924747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122880182794204,0.0,0.0,0.1388554641075655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583622207993148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273110513191201,0.0,0.0,0.29591262760892323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873443716942364,0.09743357924312908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453745855118152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368032129626069,0.0,0.0,0.1103065910543541,0.13198809105436307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141623045123167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461776718261796,0.0,0.1433579270605312,0.0,0.0,0.0949845308891274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392812063013702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29465644371559885,0.0,0.1197461856780491,0.0,0.14035741548914882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027497184577082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710929012566057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177773094659575,0.0,0.09196983448764988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270491526781225
mentalhealth,nine_terasu,2020/01/31,"Trying to be positive during a rough day I always try to be as positive as I can be. This is difficult for me, since something as small as getting an answer wrong on a quiz sends me into a deep spiral of negative thoughts. But, I always try. 

I wish people would recognize the effort I put into trying to be happy, and all the effort that I put into my academics, I went to my physics professor’s office hours today to get some help on a lab I was confused about. I showed him my lab so far, and he just looked at it and made several sounds as if he was disgusted by my work. He continuously called it bad and said he was upset over pretty much everything I had done that was “extra.” It destroyed me, and I hate how I can’t handle any criticism at all. I don’t understand what’s wrong with me even after I try so hard to make everyone content with what I do. What’s the point of trying if all I ever get in return is disappointed looks. Academics is my entire life, so without it I might as well just have never existed in the first place.",4.7399133261105115,4.836211131455404,6.3117370892018805,78.99334777898159,69.14084507042253,9.370747562296858,28.12170458649332,9.265573868473778,2.231737739256048,813,25,164,15,13,280,124,213,0.171,0.7340000000000001,0.095,-0.9466,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,4,10,12,3,2,9,0,20,1,0,3,5,32,33,18,0,4,6,0,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,10,10,0,0,3,1,0,4,5,10,1,1,10,6,27,2,31,17,6,28,0,1,2,0,9,15,0,5,9,123,37,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083710565638592,0.0,0.0,0.08514772940303192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454590058354302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785436396236105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075069457315874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281342587184726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270064161397235,0.1132604590851692,0.0,0.11964441410087945,0.11253151464719853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650435726830984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962526367952816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328936849694029,0.112164403743125,0.12361987572126545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392625033528578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233075490617755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844018625245494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21029130028509915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847761408325636,0.08357927132962052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282901501692118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204444411185443,0.0,0.09657039200997654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680549673789753,0.0,0.13081877718935553,0.0,0.11836480523840436,0.0,0.0,0.12738453494460905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517431461486935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910427211264485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14145271656984978,0.0,0.10357577924960884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639349494462623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940349611942914,0.0,0.0,0.11868532576200228,0.0,0.0,0.5100600344435123,0.0,0.0,0.1303489990395279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257966771063924,0.11607179109395838,0.0,0.0,0.14398639579559552,0.12069887308822763,0.0,0.09115505186771973,0.0,0.0,0.08894625568108465,0.2737970027590507,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AssumingHyperbolist,2020/01/31,"Desperately needing mental health treatment, no money, please help Hello. I am getting progressively more concerned about the state of my mental health but seem to be 100% out of treatment options — my worthless insurance covers $500/year for therapy and considering they bill at $175/hour that sure didn’t last long. I’m now in the position of having difficulty working — at this rate I’ll probably not last the month — while attempting treatment on my own via Google and Reddit. I need real help.",7.261048689138581,8.762976022471914,7.165786516853935,70.10725655430714,64.0561797752809,9.978277153558057,35.05805243445693,10.125756701596842,3.870301872659177,402,18,63,9,6,128,71,89,0.11199999999999999,0.78,0.10800000000000001,-0.09,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,3,2,2,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,1,11,9,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,6,1,11,7,2,12,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,2,6,35,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339849797231383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4207328258998031,0.0,0.0,0.2653064447995917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19489901745781055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32264204608921243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17514190556955506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39888841387903007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15796787461411324,0.0,0.0,0.29349180020106475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21724299935224525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21337775291214905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252620571350695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18016755085058414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18652547219694648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263244687038379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407901365741832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274459383318133
mentalhealth,burneraccount46,2020/01/31,"I think I had a panic attack I think I had a panic attack. After what had felt like the longest day, I arrived home and took a shower. As I came out of the shower, I threw a towel over my head, and immediately started crying. I pressed the towel into my face as I stood naked and cold. I didn’t understand why I was crying but I couldn’t stop, I fell to my knees and continued to cry, harder and harder. The thoughts in my head were vague, all I could hear was my own voice saying “why are you crying, why the fuck are you crying?” I felt like I was going insane, but an insane person doesn’t think they’re insane, I hope. After a few minutes I managed to pull the towel off my face and stand up, my head was pounding and I could barely breathe. A few more minutes and I was able to process my thoughts and write this. I struggle opening up to people, even though I know I have friends and family who care for me. I had to get this out somehow, and I hope this helps others.",3.3185431400282885,4.037938732673268,4.582687411598304,87.90584158415842,72.56435643564356,6.563507779349363,23.83451202263083,6.1826913282559595,0.5342888260254597,752,19,161,4,14,249,102,202,0.222,0.6629999999999999,0.11599999999999999,-0.9640000000000001,5,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,0,3,12,3,3,13,0,18,8,7,0,1,36,39,16,0,5,2,0,3,2,1,0,0,3,3,1,6,16,0,1,9,0,0,6,3,6,0,0,19,7,36,6,20,17,5,22,0,0,0,1,9,9,1,3,8,114,42,1,0.10390446765665746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364126641908583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883903053319447,0.10593752964572437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16591852528071652,0.0,0.5706708937145617,0.06700978583640277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06862792094084906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795188484588613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19952916669363116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027633396535741,0.0960580060542939,0.05428579585185165,0.0,0.05905130344867523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199078807661257,0.0,0.11710788659574425,0.0,0.0696449744580796,0.0,0.1042246529120843,0.20640116202430453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710317808751687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152494895931212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438190106537717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203427508055843,0.09072537337564504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262900310053463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354411700074223,0.0,0.0,0.08686878749504512,0.0,0.10862350967334213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19973336218759866,0.10208561192086878,0.16497708215544535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544168670772212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816821521844357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2812728622620895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BTGeneral,2020/01/31,"Need advice on how how to help a family member. About 3 years ago a parent of mine developed paranoid schizophrenia (undiagnosed) I could be wrong with the diagnosis but the symptoms seem clear that’s what it is. They can no longer care for them self and have lost home/car and any way to make an income. 

They are in complete denial of anything being wrong with them and takes offense if i mention something might be wrong and there is help for how they feel/think. My question is, are there any resource or any legal action I can take make them get a real diagnosis?

It’s tough watching a close family member you care for slowly deteriorate and I’m stuck at what to do next.

CA based with no medical insurance.",4.324863968148641,6.201351386861316,4.9431851360318495,81.80531519575318,71.62773722627738,7.609555408095554,25.593231585932315,8.296473431620573,1.6525824817518249,568,18,106,9,11,182,93,137,0.17600000000000002,0.7,0.124,-0.7184,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,6,1,6,8,1,0,7,0,14,2,0,5,1,24,26,11,0,3,3,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,5,9,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,6,0,0,2,1,12,2,15,19,0,9,0,1,1,0,13,4,0,5,3,68,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14103758867842398,0.12793982128747192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29444801255853553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877127804757552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943080728960646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15132724086428698,0.0,0.0,0.11523574694545342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721229252932035,0.0,0.07297757588202791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540645895848705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934826901117975,0.0,0.14477474059191806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15755322559722493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19268276838098947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14539727328227844,0.0,0.1531113033627868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701885337077116,0.0,0.0,0.1534965739855194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026136548240658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616826120881776,0.0,0.0,0.16427911816289867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313925955917025,0.1505676491518992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111122720046202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001411498486855,0.21703636979936533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248082512254484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456242225664795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4734065363345772,0.0,0.09294377681208683
mentalhealth,Themaskedmaurader,2020/01/31,"Hello everyone, I want help dealing with suicidal thoughts. I am 13 yr and my grades are painfully low. This makes my family a bit disapproving of me. I don’t know what to do anymore. I have no friends because of my terrible acne, not even my teachers enjoy me. My grades are low like I said. Today I was thinking of committing suicide, then a wave of emotions hit me. I am asking for support knowing some people care if I continue to live.",2.8397674418604666,5.034665244186051,4.655988372093024,80.82840116279074,76.7906976744186,7.555813953488372,31.68023255813953,8.472884824447931,2.8165860465116284,345,18,63,7,8,117,63,86,0.215,0.589,0.196,-0.5994,0,0,0,0,1,1,11.0,0,0,0,0,1,9,0,0,2,0,8,1,0,1,1,12,19,3,2,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,1,16,5,8,15,2,5,0,2,0,0,6,2,0,2,4,43,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20404271029545534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19234281697754327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541960039526467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22461910281997446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20976966599870736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21211297508661575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314342479051755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589193652231465,0.0,0.0,0.19659715824380392,0.0,0.0,0.1939570824124335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589572630193322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379058307232247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22614298511474815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10051609993621488,0.0,0.1816756745329107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733568219605205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189260655481505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263694721446254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957096084092956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4501009686700406,0.23347579278707334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183241360893366,0.0,0.16333771203143124,0.0,0.0,0.19502120467050094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135311053440527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Calmaxel,2020/01/31,"Chronic neck pain and survival To be alive and have an anxiety monster on your shoulders just makes it harder.

I have forward head posture and I try changing what I think about all day, but it is hard.  I feel the world just wants me as a consumer, but I want more.

So thankful to not be drinking or smoking, but it is hard.  I know I am worth the changes I implement.  I know lots suffer, and just so glad I know a little about how money works.  People have lots less than me and are happy.  I want to be, so I put on a brave face and work on myself.

Therapy done it.  Exercise try to do it.  I know this winter storm kills my motivation and mood.  Knowing myself is a lifelong journey.  I am up for it.

The pain is almost unbearable, but I have lived with the chronic pain on left side of the back side of my head sucks.  I know people survive with worse pain.

Live in the moment, man.  My life is worth it.",1.1002030892448502,3.225384701086956,2.6161899313501142,93.55443935926777,82.42391304347827,5.1780320366132715,22.184210526315788,6.339386263674448,0.33066739130434764,691,23,150,6,19,225,103,184,0.17300000000000001,0.669,0.158,-0.4936,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,5,10,12,2,0,11,0,17,14,5,3,1,36,31,17,1,3,9,0,3,0,0,0,8,0,0,1,9,9,1,0,9,2,3,3,1,7,0,0,1,3,24,4,19,27,5,18,0,1,0,0,2,12,1,4,5,106,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894362897925012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086837395458808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133649751644587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513125094479481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660495885579775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155585371781373,0.0,0.1163617398958406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060060058238161775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12644630047575287,0.21281178023905808,0.0,0.24381045979925564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13141536236699033,0.0,0.39167890659514587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905765676506453,0.0,0.08389967250288365,0.0,0.11905138371090808,0.2097744472591952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20196946002548646,0.0,0.0,0.07928831665469459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5055723008494925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469781569591788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194093342161786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935907126177943,0.13583827017004296,0.0,0.0,0.07611110228917829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16129119449712584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21018318840143368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17295031416722653,0.0,0.12104963070523485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rob24hernandez,2020/01/31,Just a positive message. Just want to put a positive message out there to anyone that might be struggling or in a dark place may the light be with you and you matter a lot more than you think.  You are beautiful just the way you are and have so much to give.  God bless you all.,2.1184210526315788,3.885361192982458,2.9331929824561414,94.33768421052632,77.42105263157895,6.665263157894738,21.92631578947368,7.554174236665415,0.6037115789473688,216,6,49,3,5,68,39,57,0.042,0.68,0.278,0.9274,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,6,0,0,5,2,0,1,6,0,7,0,0,0,1,15,10,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,1,7,6,4,5,1,0,0,0,9,3,0,4,0,39,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415242025937699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33135629095285124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29366191658802826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3664337688633367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539218750853563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.360888150510504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34724035940877856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611057507875488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22132982054858294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037364062624744,0.2741766233819384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ahh12345,2020/01/31,"How do I do something meaningful? For the longest time I have struggled with fulfilling myself. I am lost at what to do with myself, I'm not some charity case. I have a good life, but what do I do with myself? How do I live a life that I feel matters? I guess you could say I want to do something bigger than myself. All I really want is to connect myself to something that well I guess it bigger than myself. Look this is just my saying what's on my mind I probably am contradicting myself but how do I do something meaningful. It doesn't mean I want to help people but I do. I just want to be pure? Live a pure life, that's it. Now how do I start?",0.39520681265207,2.5048602481751843,2.7004671532846736,91.96904622871048,85.2043795620438,5.69712895377129,19.352311435523113,7.0316486544052195,0.3167648661800486,502,14,111,7,15,171,64,137,0.062,0.7759999999999999,0.162,0.8656,0,0,4,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,1,8,4,0,1,4,0,20,3,0,4,3,30,32,7,0,5,6,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,10,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,4,27,2,14,29,2,7,0,1,1,0,4,4,0,3,3,89,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12471269785349302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897922834104379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310128423514649,0.0,0.0,0.3441430144157177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469732227802274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3309852630878925,0.0,0.0,0.2758542774717647,0.0,0.13116835287085812,0.0,0.17051035239135207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701471931693782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15771710306283726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828915900762508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16840962442867846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006548540856616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484324370694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4810004386186366,0.0,0.0,0.11055890506376727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16329377227476996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108126284424753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685223650495421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044222999556424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Askewed-Red,2020/01/31,"Changing times In high school and last summer I felt like I was pretty extroverted and enjoyed meeting new people. Now in my first year of university I’ve had a pretty rough time making friends and I feel like I don’t enjoy being around people anymore which makes me sad cuz I really enjoyed meeting new people in the past.As a result of this I feel like I’ve lost my social abilities which also makes me sad because I feel like I’ve had to put myself through a lot of nervousness In previous years to get to a comfortable and sociable self. 

I’m kind of worried I won’t be able to be social with others again and mess up first impressions.",5.520390625000001,6.0072040078125015,6.414062500000004,77.57468750000002,67.515625,9.2125,30.0625,9.188382445141503,2.532153125,515,18,96,9,8,171,78,128,0.109,0.618,0.273,0.9709,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,4,16,0,1,5,0,8,0,0,5,0,17,18,7,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,5,0,2,5,5,13,11,16,9,1,20,0,3,0,0,6,7,0,1,16,58,17,1,0.1361543423354573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088825783744562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350285218336081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212062310754268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299842334877865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14403324076938667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20653117939516485,0.29180606810812393,0.13072952049416772,0.0,0.0,0.2316256280721239,0.0,0.0,0.1051925071429251,0.0,0.07113502430703401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438545380695298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417837955476865,0.0,0.1109839612813948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660725369745028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14862854836719253,0.11575355292824807,0.0,0.0,0.27265224229413865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26299742451798663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997472594415607,0.28317683263477383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27703582904959523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687272012882634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722395813128342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779546337690154,0.0,0.0,0.14203867321458186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775844113807165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878538388004412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827134373071112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17535786493714428
mentalhealth,OldhamDoesWhatever,2020/01/31,"This Is A Letter Of My Feelings.  

I believe I have some sort of obsession with perfection. Now we all have our own definitions of it, however mine is the ability to have limitless potential in the things we wish to learn. Everyday I wake up and think about the things I want to learn. Right now for me it is the game League Of Legends, however a few years ago it was Art and before that it was music. I wish to be among the best in a hobby and try my hardest to learn new things about it so I may become the best version of myself I can possibly be. However this is where life takes a turn for me.

I have ambition and drive but these only take me so far. I do learn the very basic things about something, but there is a point where I come to a plateau. Once I hit this plateau, there is no getting over it. I’ve tried looking up the most efficient ways to learn new skills, learn new thoughts, and just learning in general. I know I don’t have any sort of learning disability or anything but it always feels like no matter what angle I tackle this problem at, it never works out. Sometimes I think I find the “answer” to this problem but after a few days or maybe even a week of not seeing any results in what I am doing, I try another method. This cycle keeps going until I eventually start getting incredibly angry and frustrated that I can’t improve at anything I am doing. The only thing I have ever wanted was the ability to improve in the things that I have wanted to improve at. I never really get angry at others, so I would never pose any danger to someone else. The only person I get incredibly angry with is myself. I get mind numbing headaches thinking about the “answer” to this problem, especially at night. I find it very hard to go to sleep sometimes and sometimes leads me into staying up all night. All of this is very hard to explain verbally so that’s why I am writing it down. 

This continuous cycle of wanting to get better at something, finding some method of learning it, and it ending in failure and me switching to another method has been going on for years. I wish I could just feel like I’m getting somewhere at all. My mentality has degraded so much over time that I used to be a fun loving optimist but this cycle has turned me into a very pessimistic type of person, that I just believe that things will inevitably go wrong. I used to have a very caring heart for other people, but now at this point if something furthers me in my goals and at least gives me that feeling of some achievement or growth, I wouldn’t hesitate to ignore my loved ones. I have an obsession with the ability to learn, which I believe stems from the idealistic perfection. I’m so afraid that every time I feel like I see a glimmer of hope and that I have found this “answer”, I have to write it down in a sort of list format and then live by it, but then when I see that it isn’t working, I delete it and move on to another. I realize on the inside that people have flaws and that is okay, but for myself if I feel like I don’t even have the ability to remove my flaws. This leads me to total anger towards myself and my inability to improve. I just wish I could find the solution to improvement, but I never end up finding it and unless I seek medical help I don’t ever think I will. It’s completely maddening. My only wish is to feel improvement and feel like I’m getting closer to my goals, but I never do. I constantly feel stuck.",5.98642375168691,5.790910309941522,6.7590643274853806,77.84135627530367,66.51461988304094,9.646963562753037,32.01214574898785,9.265573868473778,2.7026062078272597,2708,99,524,45,39,899,263,684,0.115,0.706,0.179,0.9929,3,0,6,0,0,0,54.0,3,0,0,13,26,29,3,3,33,1,53,8,3,5,14,134,114,43,0,19,21,0,11,5,0,5,3,0,0,2,57,26,0,2,36,2,0,11,14,13,0,1,7,15,80,16,93,96,17,87,0,0,4,2,14,41,0,14,38,397,137,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04778397326136533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04485369426372576,0.0,0.0,0.10997276545623072,0.16957385051148485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887192668761259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595343895889254,0.04586961015611834,0.18219911707160646,0.11314099304990892,0.04767503414916628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05496024984383265,0.0,0.0,0.046434815114428526,0.05651889113497891,0.058252695199706765,0.0,0.08607831080868028,0.0,0.0,0.03476458799697012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04503112823141159,0.0,0.09548854596612033,0.0,0.0,0.07120814868508855,0.09752122176178517,0.04541770865910722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453061642247889,0.1925504997861226,0.0,0.0,0.2463432520106141,0.0,0.0,0.05910459838093144,0.0,0.0,0.22530719098069715,0.05171106750411532,0.12254295156765173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657747972738018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387827702229819,0.036131720358063724,0.0,0.0,0.053540324523562256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047913685191188084,0.0,0.0,0.0296250530389205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03807504881157863,0.13167752209359151,0.0,0.04759954407772726,0.0,0.045267043536914936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730363668809716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05415532012252197,0.0,0.0,0.054304120084589715,0.05432406527189978,0.0,0.054429188250085324,0.0,0.0,0.057293015535807276,0.039626744932326485,0.0,0.2078762237698858,0.1561868033641223,0.0,0.10117332014682916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05740759819451949,0.0365277618724018,0.1639902472415138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474257270273521,0.09413640670262127,0.0,0.0,0.1019162425587982,0.06077035177832558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474085015495714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03453324361701622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04603500244909014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886711294864098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05394442988836557,0.0,0.04567395520390636,0.12449726240937528,0.15994175352369847,0.0,0.03815459033660777,0.05745609062470582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106045472686778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25068693245503776,0.1381618711164297,0.0,0.04279494568210244,0.06286546107088847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979488811135972,0.11726740925058868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311408876807847,0.0,0.22238841462473294,0.12717944212845822,0.042787676790392366,0.043239740555089806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04864132926864754,0.0,0.309943323302782,0.0,0.0,0.0784876919950871,0.0,0.0,0.03829292056212109,0.058937202002022085,0.0,0.06942674925299365
mentalhealth,franksgraybunnysuit,2020/01/31,"I have an addiction Food is the only thing I feel like I can really enjoy. Other things I enjoy, I don't have any control over. Sometimes good, sometimes not, but I can control how good food is. It doesn't require anything from anyone else. There's no immediate negative consequences when I enjoy it. I feel powerless over everything else in my life but not this. I already dont like myself so what's a weight problem. Nothing else feels as good. This is my addiction. But I want to have confidence and control in my life but the minute I'm stressed, I find myself with donuts, fried chicken, or a burrito. Then I feel better",2.879848484848484,5.3188562066115725,4.1408471074380175,83.33430096418735,77.84297520661157,7.339118457300277,27.438705234159784,8.344100000000001,2.2018424242424257,495,21,91,10,12,162,73,121,0.139,0.617,0.244,0.9088,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,5,4,11,0,1,5,0,11,7,0,4,0,21,17,11,0,2,7,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,8,2,3,4,5,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,0,5,17,9,8,17,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,4,64,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781825816249313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14079808766725274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676517465622212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921348272021737,0.13073042931151013,0.10499521386878402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284246551952296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4293071205000926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14953383936756698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197537427362582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466913552653972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580521591858157,0.0911499006582774,0.0,0.0,0.11661441010823476,0.0,0.3085632442846156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3210478333354744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18024034840674988,0.1246674827755916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224254808878284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703749640739466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12208583492874665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173704375204069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523783797149184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14615323913478598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695294704876009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525554029112153,0.0,0.0,0.15536952971902934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,charlo1315,2020/01/31,"I feel lost I am just lost

I have suffered through having depression my entire life. When I was still in school I was suicidal, but I thank god everyday that I never went through with those toxic thoughts. I met my fiancé right after high school and he has been amazing support through things that have been impossibly hard but things have been getting worse.... and I’m back to my depression. I’m not suicidal this time but its still so hard. I’m not working right now, which might be the problem but I honestly have no idea how I would get out of bed in the morning and go to a job anyway. There is a lot of family stuff going on (parents getting a divorce, finding out my dad is abusive towards my mom, and my only grandfather passing away) and my fiancé and I are completely broke.... I feel useless and disgusting. But the new symptom of my depression this time around is the boredom. Nothing entertains me anymore. I’ve watched a million shows, nothing, I’ve read a bunch of different books, nothing, I’ve cleaned and gone for walks, I’ve listened to music and watched movies with my man..... nothing helps I just lay there staring at the ceiling thinking about all of my anxieties, and everything that is making me so sad.... I just want to something to take my mind off of this feeling for just a minute.",5.36582117647059,6.459285888000005,5.438094117647061,82.2669294117647,68.12,8.442352941176473,35.10588235294117,8.671277953709913,2.9436635294117637,1032,51,193,16,17,324,141,250,0.221,0.7,0.08,-0.9904,3,0,1,0,1,0,38.0,0,0,0,3,17,16,1,0,11,0,20,2,0,2,2,43,44,19,2,3,11,3,5,0,0,2,2,1,2,1,12,15,0,0,7,4,0,6,4,11,0,1,11,9,27,5,30,30,3,30,0,9,3,0,9,13,0,2,11,138,39,6,0.0,0.1269249220041418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194988900371075,0.0,0.10623864063733628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536344656202274,0.0,0.0,0.10064692003543133,0.08237206750503882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231791749825504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27679832101956026,0.0,0.0,0.11192221988066564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627652234982756,0.0,0.10098737047573757,0.0,0.16249597825862422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790978025206204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16790426603490047,0.0,0.12176255449967532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19192488002468905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180324144284962,0.11318283253408855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12093043230270005,0.0,0.0,0.10630445846923843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566514673735766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338779203683917,0.09107335209662518,0.0,0.0,0.0715063829841451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364208215872047,0.10816512766979214,0.12546282739656545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262095763865715,0.10346143352713896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4111550852027628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147294953205236,0.0,0.0,0.11894899241937255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250360361698566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715341058732478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18296734076967325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21683126670368735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246961306359113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17109940229328038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12263183297800127,0.23435345958604656,0.12156352369318404,0.0,0.11134329083258013,0.08054423294186566,0.0,0.0,0.0986257744188369,0.0,0.0,0.14233741084213847,0.06864100360886127,0.0,0.08504482451691117,0.1249302229441634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06318475912037902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993054116838034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798785447753404,0.0,0.10916893709566923,0.07609811526896221,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TimesGrimes,2020/01/31,I’m Going To a Psychologist Soon. What Can I Expect? How Does This Work? What questions will the person ask?  How will they know what to test me on? Should I tell them my therapist recommenced me to be tested for Mood and Personality disorders?,2.164855072463766,5.009795195652174,3.5608695652173914,83.18811594202901,86.17391304347824,6.544927536231885,20.71014492753623,7.793537801064563,1.2220840579710144,193,6,36,4,6,63,37,46,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,1,3,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,2,0,7,9,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,5,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,1,1,27,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881636888618411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35327084580281704,0.0,0.26974374198116896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17518044142921851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16940117084929313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5382882350967892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34530042033581976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26941618599543177,0.0,0.0,0.35789151314008344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22440309058280308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,untexturedlife,2020/01/31,"I've noticed I mirror others. What is this? Could it be used in a positive way? I have very bad OCD for a very long time but I don't believe I've been officially diagnosed with anything else, though therapists have thrown around a lot of different ideas.

I find myself mirroring strong personalities I come across, particularly people I spend a lot of time around and media I just finished engaging with. I'll adopt body language, speech patterns, self-image, writing styles, philosophies, and modes of thinking. I'd like to think this is something everyone experiences, but it has me a bit worried.

Every roommate or friend I've ever had (not that many tbh) I've mimicked. I've mimicked their depressions, their decision making processes, their goals, and so on though never to any overt degree. And of course I've mimicked family members, who hasn't? But I'm worried part of me has been permanently damaged. I worry my self-image is forever attached to whoever I spend the most time around. I wonder if I've always wished to be left alone so I don't have to go through the process of mirroring, or if there's any way to move in a healthy direction.

Are these symptoms of something, or is there a way to spin this in a positive light? Creating a separate positive mental image that I could mimic somehow? How on earth would I go about doing that?",4.3700790513833985,6.656426699604747,5.172470355731225,78.46131422924906,72.51778656126483,8.394466403162056,30.47233201581028,9.095868883498916,2.9142031620553364,1077,48,188,24,22,349,147,253,0.08800000000000001,0.77,0.142,0.9438,1,1,2,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,3,2,14,7,0,0,11,0,22,3,1,3,2,40,32,17,0,6,10,0,0,1,1,1,2,1,0,1,12,10,0,0,6,0,2,4,5,3,0,0,3,2,20,4,28,24,5,24,0,2,0,0,7,10,0,10,8,121,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136042264598595,0.0,0.0,0.09126963565768896,0.0,0.0,0.14918391004678758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026430594536136,0.2929381145219805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09158533256120108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358140026328973,0.0,0.0,0.11975145483266235,0.12183921828472932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448694755012596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17515471567056995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447456160327487,0.11133153894012232,0.0,0.11460115745583603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916306835903022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921954618450513,0.09241730898130612,0.10481208151976062,0.0,0.10729642019975864,0.10340457468839133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025332016373986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847450785075901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467702745103125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382498782011847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917689799421105,0.0,0.0,0.053588270322289855,0.0,0.0,0.09707088856053317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865065145202526,0.0,0.0,0.07321793888828099,0.11120694305127647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054022920962768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658153780907965,0.0,0.0,0.08459854875640617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248811071038958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878197816145873,0.0,0.07604420873994612,0.0957757848367538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288580972089369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688871632835642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140083713310956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735682603667345,0.0,0.14056794925785088,0.2155368280884072,0.0,0.1918807744237304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947356633156208,0.0,0.18100903312845165,0.0,0.2611969249402255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261363847804872,0.0,0.11895252101080316,0.0,0.3341820495984972,0.0,0.07791957753633891,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samerkia,2020/01/31,"Pretty sure imma die alone... I'm in college and so socially anxious and akward that I cant talk to people. I really want a girlfriend but I'm scared of committing, talking to people, rejection, and I'm not very affectionate at all towards people... but my dog I am XD...

I really want a girlfriend but it doesnt helo all my friends always run my insecurities in my face ya know, I also wanna live my life my way doing my own thing but I'm never gonna meat someone that way, and my friends say the same thing. I just wanna hurry up graduate college get a job, a house, a dog, and then spend the rest of my life playing games and being lonely cuz I'm never gonna do anything about it...",1.041063829787234,3.2365827517730534,3.72564539007092,85.09400000000002,83.18439716312056,6.029503546099291,22.16595744680852,7.3011,0.99199914893617,532,18,106,8,15,187,84,141,0.156,0.716,0.128,-0.8013,1,3,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,0,4,9,0,2,7,0,6,3,1,1,6,25,17,14,1,4,6,0,0,0,4,2,2,1,0,0,6,6,0,0,1,2,1,1,5,4,0,0,0,1,16,5,12,14,5,11,0,2,0,0,10,5,0,0,3,70,22,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17239359025654136,0.0,0.13311123174820064,0.13850101059395836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18804285508031507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697543004206786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17275041317297432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25720008481652723,0.0,0.08696405657646405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19206272223545848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651774637827421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147741010283696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23513928229910305,0.0,0.0,0.14697975421633155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567553691457609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34618960679766386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693410506699885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21326623006444956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323689408570514,0.16664702342126986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16967637736274793,0.14103384475691028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15687860109370536,0.0,0.0,0.2675748762071548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22116600623209068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373399479151632,0.19635485494237825,0.2642429603052611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway123445pie_,2020/01/31,"IDK what to do anymore using a throwaway because dont want this on my other account. I feel as if I don't really matter anymore ngl. I try and try to keep on going but i have constant negativity being put on me and I just cant handle the weight of it as much. I thought about talking to a therapist but at the same time I'm very apprehensive about talking to one. Every day its either my family bringing me down by saying something about me that they think doesn't hurt me from the way I act, but it does hurt. I had to disassociate with the only friends I had for 5 years because I never felt welcomed or fit in with them, no matter how much I tried I would just end up being put down and treated like I wasn't a friend (had several occasions where they questioned why they were still friends with me). I've been cutting which I never even expected myself to do ever, and my thoughts have just been negative for the longest. I keep a good look outside to keep others from worrying about me, but then inside I just... idk what to say about it. I rarely talk about it because I'm going to be a full grown man in 2 years or so, and I've been told many times by family to ""stop being a little bitch"" when getting sad or mad at what they say to me, that or I have an ""attitude"" towards them that then turns into me being the main cause for the problem and then I always end up being the bad guy. There are some good times yeah, but theres a lot of bad times. I always blame myself for it though, because I've only shown myself as being the least serious goofy type guy that has no problems whatsoever. Honestly theres a chance my baby sister will grow up with one older brother if my thoughts keep on going the way they are.",5.885564335768597,5.110018609065159,6.66485462949158,80.37000298195915,66.87535410764872,9.244610108841508,30.47696436558819,8.371475516178862,2.0671223796033984,1351,42,279,16,19,449,176,353,0.18100000000000002,0.7140000000000001,0.105,-0.9791,0,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,7,0,21,21,3,1,19,1,29,1,0,3,3,55,51,27,0,7,16,2,3,1,3,2,0,3,0,3,17,11,1,5,7,0,1,9,11,12,0,2,13,7,43,9,49,29,9,50,0,3,1,0,24,19,1,9,21,209,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14657609562873972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469964638823673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708309468911113,0.2147664065771304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090480486762713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518115243775244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056803097920728116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707775234590297,0.0,0.10322689529251636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15602213457251987,0.0,0.0,0.058174764545827165,0.07967169795837241,0.07420961101346044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16606441691977922,0.0,0.04453494160409346,0.0,0.08456880328949308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20414680044272415,0.0,0.046017180013165064,0.0,0.15017046825060235,0.14775148874116442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17442236376099074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885788884491579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131515036962555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043030518193358167,0.08827741059503325,0.0,0.0,0.07396343390674852,0.0,0.0,0.07488086402095892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929738462197151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949509845287596,0.0,0.13586254490024308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936802096684787,0.1339747514470181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16855772248194653,0.0,0.1770856666576538,0.09866764688627523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05642509610264021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21012975771944845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950319997793516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780683635235052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033929674399916,0.07363724836224397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123815584878788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226548061469984,0.0,0.05643689991825562,0.08653630119630072,0.20977255565098893,0.2054362296111562,0.0,0.0,0.08416241378188001,0.0,0.1793977762983559,0.09580369730186122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607121221389859,0.0,0.07267366950222537,0.05195075449589683,0.1398246166321286,0.0,0.10725541619064696,0.0,0.0,0.07947679948579196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894476016154138,0.0,0.06256816610484213,0.0,0.0,0.11343883714311072
mentalhealth,pink3504,2020/01/31,"Does anyone else have a similar problem? Hi! I’ve been having this issue for a few years now and couldn’t find anything about it online.

Every now and then I get a sudden bad feeling. Honestly ‘bad’ isn’t enough to describe it. It’s a horrifying, dreadful, terrible feeling. The worst I can even imagine.

I don’t think i can explain how awful it really is, but I’ll try. 

Out of nowhere I just feel like all the happiness and positivity is gone. I just want to leave the place, doesn’t matter if I’m at home or outside, I just want to leave immidiately. 

When I was searching for something that could explain it online, all I found was people having a bad feeling in terms of thinking something bad was going to happen to them, but it’s not like that for me.
I never think I’m in danger or anything like that. 

It happens very quickly. One second I’m completely fine and the next it’s awful. I feel extremely distressed, maybe a bit lost as i just kind of disconnect from reality and everything that’s around me. The worst feeling passes in a couple of minutes, but it makes be feel bad for the rest of the day.

It can happen anytime and anywhere. I can get it three times in a week and then nothing for a month or longer.

I just really want to know what is it and why it’s happening.

I do have bad depression and anxiety, but even at the worst times it’s nothing compared to these sudden feelings.",2.122035330261138,4.412071483870972,3.775641321044549,85.74060483870969,79.68100358422939,6.422990271377369,25.37647209421403,7.5804360353943165,1.4608493599590378,1100,43,214,17,28,366,137,279,0.256,0.6609999999999999,0.083,-0.9957,0,0,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,1,1,14,23,1,2,17,2,22,0,0,2,3,54,53,22,0,7,14,0,8,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,21,11,0,0,17,0,0,3,6,16,0,3,7,8,18,7,28,43,10,29,0,2,0,0,4,9,0,4,20,150,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204010868456685,0.0,0.0,0.06584614279349704,0.09648871732646884,0.15498845318524893,0.08383163343335245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4717701713690501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028097017797506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098735887042289,0.0,0.0,0.0751874125812153,0.10419777155104508,0.0,0.0607321262786809,0.0,0.08110883928531748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240916358613051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866729691891974,0.0,0.0,0.09730321063616976,0.0,0.12439734014367705,0.0,0.07934263503464034,0.0,0.08463429564303193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3809231251560323,0.06727536232589956,0.0,0.0,0.08607005203291028,0.0,0.0,0.10325299793094893,0.0,0.0,0.09840030878064153,0.0,0.053519216233898194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33309834314360554,0.10024615641947113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446060307462978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09828944560640604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980639944801715,0.05175359657157872,0.0,0.0,0.1994257418367238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13802072213049854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279813070580544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285948235494034,0.0,0.09460683787278136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516592573526804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726300284267907,0.0,0.10015130325414727,0.0,0.0,0.18071810336972008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06381230943699479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528590766229732,0.0,0.0983880391107796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901083678684792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206559567076628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14499397035196132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810217958919823,0.0,0.0,0.1098230509925056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393552935834103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777004535827207,0.16663244952171338,0.0,0.07553782555622361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497415104599719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06064265889068793
mentalhealth,what_to_do_92,2020/01/31,"What To Do Hello,  


I have a problem that is probably familiar with almost everyone, but I and my family are struggling with what to do concerning the mental health of a family member. I am not in direct and constant contact with the person in question, however, my close family is and I feel the need to reach out because I am very concerned at this point and rather lost.  


I have a relative that has been ""off"" for a while now. A few years back, they separated from their long-term partner with whom they practically grew up with and spent a long, but tumultuous, committed relationship together. Tensions grew deep between them and after living apart for a while they parted but remained in contact. I believe that the conflict between them is the origin of my relative's mental health struggles.   


Lately, my relative has been experiencing paranoid and delusional thoughts, mostly about the family, the ex, and will make odd and nonsensical statements and accusations. They have even threatened family members. They have self-isolated and I think they drink and unhealthy amount of alcohol, most likely to self-medicate, but this obviously just exacerbates the problem. Each day I think that their mental state worsens.   


Only once was there an attempt on their part to accept that they needed help. Unfortunately, this visit to the walk-in mental health clinic was ineffective. Nothing came of it besides frustration as they were told they needed to ""see their friends more"". No referral. Disappointed with the outcome, I think that they resigned to be non-committal and unreasonably suspicious of receiving help from mental health professionals -- or any doctors for that matter. It is unknown whether they answered openly/honestly about the reality of their mental state, and so it calls into question really how to receive an accurate and useful ""diagnosis"" if they are not willing to accept help.  


I am so worried about it all and I am seeking any solid and informed suggestions with how to go about giving the advice to my family that they so desperately need to be able to know what to do next, what the next step is, and how to go about it-- how to access the help the family member in question needs.  


Most of all, I just feel like I need to be there for my family members who are directly affected. I want to be able to give them an idea of what steps to take and to lead them in the best direction so that they can deal with it all and get things back to ""reality"". Ideally, I want my relative to be able to function to their true potential and hopefully regain a sense of control and some peace of mind.  


In my opinion, I think it starts with anti-psychotics to control the paranoid delusions and therapy weekly to talk it all out. As well as complete cessation of drinking/smoking marijuana/contact with ex.  


Any questions you have, please ask and I will do my best to answer.  Thanks for any advice.",9.211533177537,8.833147657743787,8.908612704482689,65.69300332837621,59.99426386233269,12.260576446427308,39.255647617024295,11.573893991303489,4.787339692656327,2327,104,374,59,27,751,247,523,0.129,0.7340000000000001,0.13699999999999998,0.7194,1,0,3,0,0,0,67.0,0,1,24,9,23,22,1,3,28,0,37,8,0,11,7,110,70,44,0,14,12,2,2,2,2,3,7,0,0,2,28,40,2,3,19,1,1,11,3,10,1,0,10,4,52,12,81,52,16,46,0,3,1,0,56,17,0,13,18,295,80,3,0.1814773425551585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822503920337855,0.0,0.06464802946912053,0.06057444807372382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645477547476684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056552272549528215,0.0,0.0,0.0930299163313898,0.0,0.03687563453660985,0.0,0.0,0.06815427325748365,0.12696618316623373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06176955237736673,0.06918724458913628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342518030605115,0.06537084543168331,0.1356948473381751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03901262423403761,0.0623650571769992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061916583319546185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0592595688527242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039954691068033885,0.0,0.0,0.05780312595070495,0.0,0.0,0.4562151666429999,0.0,0.0611735981199469,0.043215816594097615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04673631489470105,0.0,0.03160480709465965,0.11605973558235913,0.06875850394739795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25720257183068124,0.0,0.0,0.1621872497820275,0.0,0.0,0.060082649683298614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828861008223931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033245067141930984,0.0,0.0682381156662903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05910710853186801,0.0,0.05341593943174957,0.10706782493492374,0.0,0.0,0.06603465234832179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04037917845007598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719347214681408,0.0,0.3657729547381951,0.0,0.061080127535218874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26912630002718424,0.0,0.0,0.12866880841531633,0.0,0.0,0.05804413488422315,0.0,0.0,0.06442248234716882,0.0,0.04600723223181651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13101485143287064,0.0,0.0,0.052819671870582466,0.0,0.066402541834132,0.057184915791867776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522108977720492,0.11576620518321695,0.0,0.0,0.27106154227030765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03875301087792407,0.0,0.0,0.06494624996824178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04820464868857141,0.0,0.12621363134852728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0428168657064324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264796809294185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04548279215584442,0.04862153790209271,0.0,0.05569331825828982,0.06917838570635151,0.0,0.040188494178141104,0.15504447116722836,0.0,0.048024246257640686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780312595070495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05224605216550339,0.0,0.04991260448427697,0.07136002570323137,0.0,0.048523392551064186,0.0,0.0543899751699211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061433016828200925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038955152879042484
mentalhealth,bacon_nada997,2020/01/31,"I'm going to try again Last year I canceled the appointments, I scheduled on the first place, twice, out of shame. But I'm going to try again sometime in the next two months. Wish me luck!",1.5402631578947386,3.830484868421056,2.088684210526313,97.0082894736842,81.89473684210526,4.852631578947369,20.026315789473685,5.985473137389443,-0.16581052631578966,147,4,32,1,4,45,28,38,0.077,0.773,0.149,0.4389,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,1,6,5,0,14,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,8,18,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558500558377099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418894195310757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451823049744161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400860525108901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198913712151269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142593627807984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974869495224097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084305144567907,0.0,0.29382609709316115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34589127007609355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936975623516916
mentalhealth,DarkBlitz01,2020/01/31,"I watched a traumatic video and I can’t stop thinking about it. A while ago, there was a conversation on ask reddit about some people mentioning horrible videos on the internet. I remember a comment named a website where you are shown a series of videos that progressively get worse. I looked it up today out of curiosity having remembered that thread from a while back. 

It was a big mistake. I forced myself to watch all the videos. The last 2 videos however were the worst ones. I still wish I didn’t watch them. It’s been half a day and I still can’t get those images out of my head. I didn’t eat... I can’t eat. The way the meat jiggles... the way it’s soft. I hope that this is a temporary matter. I haven’t cried in about a year, I can’t cry. Even if I wanted to, I can’t. I tried to draw or listen to music but it’s only a temporary distraction. I don’t feel like the same person. How can I overcome this?",0.55910533910534,2.8435031428571484,2.5572799422799437,92.02951298701299,86.35449735449734,6.187686387686387,19.17291967291968,7.520522993642371,0.5484899470899469,710,20,157,13,22,237,110,189,0.134,0.816,0.05,-0.8922,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,1,1,10,5,0,1,20,0,17,3,1,1,1,22,27,8,0,5,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,12,4,2,1,4,5,0,0,9,3,0,2,6,7,22,2,17,21,4,21,0,0,4,0,9,8,0,4,12,108,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483572405943824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564618539971216,0.0,0.0,0.12869185030237815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36768089062906745,0.10793531792386801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425083529374029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054171227003977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462378385536316,0.11956419223277515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17488056590196513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17176276761099926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662292661055386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642321868872198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176512957287252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14054280568653127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113409530154324,0.1272871367982929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602846189088516,0.14613495472092908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3791794072553424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673126866143827,0.13992299899047042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723948091379658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15864059667516062,0.0,0.0,0.11362852102785333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987150597089752,0.2656899887895817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19245924123698305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17055724028689934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777631326589622
mentalhealth,violetnuisance,2020/01/31,"How do I talk about my suicidal ideation? Hi, I’m fairly new to Reddit, so I hope I’m doing this right. Yesterday, I thought I was finally going to end my life. I finished my suicide note, printed it out, and walked off campus, intending to jump in front of traffic. However, I didn’t. All I could think about was the possible guilt the driver might experience for the rest of their life.

I have an appointment with a new therapist tomorrow as a last ditch attempt at recovery before actually taking my life. What should I tell the therapist? Despite going to therapy since middle school, I’ve never actually talked about my suicidal ideation or self harm. Should I show the therapist my note or tell them about how close I was to finally committing? I don’t know how to broach the topic. Thank you in advance.",4.2489291101055855,6.395990464052293,5.427450980392159,77.11276018099551,72.46405228758171,9.675012569130217,30.72347913524384,10.035473477838034,3.4962794369029657,643,29,115,19,13,213,97,153,0.128,0.823,0.049,-0.9337,1,0,0,0,0,2,20.0,0,1,2,2,8,4,0,1,9,0,12,3,0,4,3,21,22,8,3,4,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,3,1,0,6,3,2,0,0,5,0,21,2,20,13,2,24,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,4,10,75,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.2478709862688767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806922699838592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014006493488814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248595000738212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242321868345111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27824865519520503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14435616527962064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261415011989659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979689975139852,0.10352346495270266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26911550451302035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472890136243182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795166227789948,0.2453183716402728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14317551247440974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845889277474896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12853266056499524,0.0,0.0,0.13249063593230356,0.0,0.0,0.10505724930866853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41675825813030776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548959161256122,0.2041585653729003,0.22201044338774426,0.11692624757535094,0.1452376929033131,0.4423768372900647,0.0,0.08137766247295869,0.0,0.1008252889780848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hu4all,2020/01/31,"I need an explanation of what's happening in my head. Last year I had gotten engaged and before marriage I discovered she had over 2 dozen affairs. So I broke it off I'm depressed and anxiety ridden. That's taken care of with a prescription. My real question is I feel like I developed a fetish for that. Like being a cuckhold or something which is something I've never had until those events it's been almost a year. I've had other ""relationships"" since then but whenever I do think about it I'm torn morally in my head. Like what is wrong with me. I'm not sure how else I can explain it. I don't like being cheated on but at the same time I think I do. 1 half of my brain says it's okay the other half says how dare you think that. I need some advice....",0.977647058823532,3.2040869745222937,2.9684526039715284,90.22932933683028,83.71337579617834,5.732334207568378,21.337204945672536,7.048011613610866,0.6212430872986134,593,19,125,8,17,199,94,157,0.098,0.769,0.133,0.6385,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,4,12,1,0,7,1,14,3,3,2,2,24,28,10,0,2,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,14,4,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,4,0,3,7,3,19,8,14,19,2,15,1,2,0,0,9,6,0,4,12,84,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160440565171858,0.0,0.0,0.16440846625058908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560176716287194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971011144015855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183285768401766,0.0,0.0,0.16739847154416282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141307853062274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371562549163592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301732629647472,0.11729444262298434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518905267429333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.337004210275435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13383342536011156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208517573748033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434835348468693,0.1266302909041674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839257881885348,0.0,0.0,0.1868795036200305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17627421603594953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611344415997649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13581627643852598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25279666059233546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474327145896594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315611093239516,0.0,0.0,0.0957381209700478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951151168820936,0.0,0.21146067825845474
mentalhealth,ThrowRA_pleasehelp32,2020/01/31,"My live-in girlfriend (28y) is breaking things off, but I suspect there is more going on and that she might need help. If I can't help her, please at least help me understand the situation. I just want your analysis and some advice. The last thing I want to do is minimize her issues with me. But, that's what I'm going to do here.

We argue, but it's over small stuff and it's usually me getting annoyed with her. She doesn't like it when I'm moody, but I'm always quick to try to turn things around and get back on track. I've been in two other serious relationships, and this type of arguing feels not ideal, but I'd still say it's natural and OK. We don't shout or do or say mean things. It's more just an attitude problem. Overall, I'd consider our fights pretty healthy.

She thinks it's the biggest deal in the world. She thinks the occasional argument or conversation that leaves a bad taste is the worst possible thing that could happen in a relationship. I understand how arguing could be tiring, but to me, her analysis feels way out of line with reality.

I think there's more going on to the situation, and here's why...

She has a big time career in the public eye with a lot of stress. Last time she was in a stressful career place, about 8 months ago, we broke up.

The first breakup happened because she said she would call me one day at a specific time, I got a bit irked when I waited around and she didn't keep her word, and I brought it up calmly the next time we talked. A few days later, I get an email that basically says that conversation was abusive (big red flag for me) and I'm super mean and she can't be in the relationship anymore.

So, 3 months pass when we don't talk. She isolated herself the entire time and drank heavily. She told me she was vomiting almost every night for nearly 3 weeks. Her whole family knew her mental health was poor. She eventually came out of it, contacted me, told me that I did nothing wrong and that she was sorry and that she had a breakdown from stress and lost control. She insisted this was how she felt and I forgave her. It took a lot for me to trust her again but she promised it would never happen again. My mom is bipolar and I've gotten used to being understanding of these types of things, despite it being horrible.

Cut to now, and it's the same thing happening. There is another very similar major milestone in her career. We start having small little fights or arguments that she takes from a 1/10 or a 2/10 on the intensity scale directly to a 10/10 every time, no matter what it is or how I react.

Half her words are telling me she loves me more than anything and I'm her best friend and her family. The other half of her words are her saying that the relationship cannot work and I need to leave. We've been talking about the break up, with me basically begging to work on it, for about 3 days now before it finally stuck. I wrote her a letter apologizing and trying to take responsibility for my role in her feeling poorly. I told her I would work hard on interacting better and giving her what she needs. I tried so hard to be a leader or at least a good person here, despite the dynamic feeling completely unfair and out-of-whack with reality.

She had a trip to Los Angeles planned for work today to have some major meetings. She cancelled the entire trip and I think she's planning on starting drinking heavily again.

I've brought up my concerns a couple times about the similarity between now and the first break up

I'm sitting in a hotel right now wondering what the fuck happened, and I can't help but think that she needs some kind of help. She's been in therapy before and has had run-ins outside of our relationship with some acute mental health episodes with anxiety and that sort of thing.

I don't necessarily expect to get back together. I wonder if she will turn her perspective around like she did after the first break up, but I can't wait 3 months and I don't think I can trust her again. The first time was probably the last chance. But I'd like to at least understand the situation better and to do/say the right things to her if we do speak again. I just want her to be happy and I want to understand why I couldn't do it. I love her so much.",4.781849957734572,5.5420756674556255,5.6138746830093,81.68955251479291,69.24852071005918,9.065300084530852,27.752007607776843,9.23628265651192,2.108887151310228,3349,107,684,64,56,1097,335,845,0.14,0.736,0.124,-0.9174,0,0,1,0,2,0,87.0,9,1,0,17,38,39,8,3,48,1,59,12,1,6,1,141,134,61,0,20,24,1,7,3,2,5,5,7,0,1,48,53,3,4,22,2,2,10,15,19,0,8,32,17,110,20,90,88,22,110,1,2,2,3,112,45,1,21,52,468,158,9,0.0,0.05785395090534975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04771477943182679,0.04328364098168213,0.0,0.04889482716212592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040629337970581485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051201083853464016,0.03735377402843573,0.0,0.04842488774177054,0.0,0.0,0.0401818081830493,0.13040351890980495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07509241643265556,0.04076987272890096,0.02976548420163622,0.0,0.08309914820634644,0.0,0.051242642556084135,0.08636992368193817,0.053308225630625455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0498594982441672,0.05584695318878182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051195897402427616,0.0,0.05476546892607337,0.07797138762349351,0.054027958644905935,0.0,0.09447129506203536,0.0503401811918155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04783347548176722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228046609095488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09206258757240812,0.0,0.09875690500125683,0.0,0.046883149341340934,0.05348938564312178,0.0,0.16613445641257052,0.0,0.0,0.037724884198529984,0.045141288543442216,0.10204379103908301,0.046840878392114337,0.08325131982241023,0.0409551444658913,0.03905272198005034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215895014357782,0.051978992570764215,0.08748173653477735,0.0,0.0,0.10380511663935936,0.0,0.0,0.1636440322233974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096441145914676,0.0,0.0434011365396756,0.0,0.050847511990536914,0.0,0.11940556987236944,0.0,0.10340495360215922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156561754061656,0.04893912250627786,0.04311658148398253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05330222587175077,0.08302472292733573,0.08813950346035522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637740165996606,0.0,0.0,0.09841556393953127,0.05179946804913376,0.0,0.05718751008104151,0.1169236577715582,0.0,0.03589466684869192,0.14482326396763015,0.03765965542073662,0.0,0.051929809917266236,0.0458223685398385,0.0,0.04685239458533864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03308754845691627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04263528284614493,0.051015533529203134,0.053599180997145585,0.0,0.0550469521300836,0.0,0.04967627853730948,0.052645529813176384,0.04672241162444838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26211841527309776,0.0,0.08339877923916039,0.04644721589652937,0.1941524618421684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16465630312855822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05465966200834635,0.06912232186720009,0.0,0.038994612972411816,0.0,0.16779911780315854,0.0,0.0558971077745537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342611718407345,0.11773982765073653,0.04267838137379845,0.0,0.055839802425442085,0.0,0.2919561936279253,0.18772451572992455,0.0,0.0,0.22777896950987056,0.05612133580966918,0.04628383895586888,0.13997356687512125,0.05425041288770325,0.09945431897515394,0.10622307218136597,0.047698483747218204,0.25416166829681186,0.0,0.04217226523346283,0.053777845735050886,0.04028873967617557,0.11520158198710488,0.03875789965195287,0.03916738769483632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812050104833706,0.05451542998413995,0.0,0.0,0.1059051489309515,0.1421913185500191,0.0,0.0,0.10405938932820116,0.05338644984516114,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rhetoric4789,2020/02/01,"I think I've ruined a close friendship and it's really damaged me So last Thursday I had a really great night with one of my close friends and we ended up alone and we had been drinking... my perception was that it got a bit flirty and if one of us had had of made a move it would've ended physically (you get the picture). I did once have feelings for this person and i think i still might do, especially after that night. Then the next day we were out with a few other people and j was trying just to talk and be ljke how we usually are, not flirty or anything, and i felt a bit ignored. This built up and built up and noticably brought my mood down. When i got home i texted the person because they are usually the one I've been talking to about a lot of my problems and i told them i was beginning to have suicidal thoughts again (which i was). The next day i saw them again and it just felt like i was getting the cold shoulder again. I asked and they basically told me they were sick of me being in a low mood all the time and talkjng about my problems and they told me to 'lay off' which i understand and told them that but it was really hurtful. Then after that we hadn't spoke for a bit so i tried to start a conversation and got ignored. Then i snapped and had a real go at them for ignoring me and they just got ticked off too and i regret it because it ended with them saying we shouldn't talk anymore and me realising how stupid I'd been. I've apologised multiple times and they've said they've accepted it but i still feel as though they don't want to be around me and don't like me anymore. I'm trying to give it time but they were like my only close friend and now i feel as though i have no one. I really don't know what to do and want to fix things so that they are like how they were last thursday. I see them havjng a great time with my other friends and then it's like I'm either not there or they just really don't like me. I just want to fix it because something is definitely wrong and it's just destroying me.",2.280757676902536,3.7466888714953264,3.6258718291054777,90.84729906542057,76.17289719626169,7.040961281708945,22.976234979973306,7.760100539840176,0.8376778905206947,1599,46,362,23,35,524,169,428,0.129,0.759,0.11199999999999999,-0.6368,0,1,2,0,0,0,24.0,7,1,16,0,26,27,2,0,19,0,38,3,1,4,1,87,74,48,1,8,15,0,5,6,3,2,1,3,1,2,25,42,1,3,12,1,0,3,9,13,0,4,36,11,65,12,38,33,7,51,0,5,2,0,42,14,0,5,40,256,90,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933169234343435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15192785958610908,0.0,0.0,0.06303304350548276,0.06818782804451022,0.0716081266707516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400789918733653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508732078507705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879783117337182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503618372088572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203527392101707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161896745858188,0.0,0.14709082172929366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17753662971755188,0.0,0.0800378456182107,0.07347910059385264,0.043532005332274866,0.0,0.2450474017856137,0.16889756620567267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683332765493997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199898361997299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04209586762392445,0.12487402999677312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22452940213065825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512027717205958,0.0,0.07247820824263394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125762056868525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141079763139128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629241746829767,0.14376273643724896,0.0,0.0,0.08720652282927388,0.0,0.08157361443468304,0.20761722537458,0.058255690972300066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05310291668055928,0.13376359900315835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14658652448832807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718448578162546,0.24535092815138804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286156379467118,0.060913239733977886,0.0,0.0,0.06103812338199481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058968336372155636,0.0,0.0,0.0542159564050331,0.0,0.12234139015209285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378500347875048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846980017630884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0508878361925192,0.09816090167923062,0.15051289786855668,0.06080969259498295,0.17865798409747102,0.0,0.0,0.29276797401331106,0.0,0.15601359665575176,0.0,0.0,0.07974048067820555,0.09213710920247592,0.0,0.16872218763308833,0.0,0.13553719937540454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054412517432415784,0.08374711263274827,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MysteryWriter7598,2020/02/01,"I... want to die... again I'm back here... again. This time, though, I don't see a future. I don't see my happily ever after like I've been planning. Now that's all gone. I just want to disappear and die. I have a plan. I wrote a note. My fiance saw my note and said nothing to me. They brushed it off, like nothing happened. I feel like a burden, but I don't want to be a burden with my dead body. I'm more or less venting at this point. Maybe I should just end it.",-1.4836877828054291,0.4312906764705886,1.0052941176470611,101.82997737556562,93.21568627450979,3.9227752639517344,15.689291101055806,5.369823440869387,-1.0196917043740572,347,8,89,2,13,117,62,102,0.182,0.725,0.09300000000000001,-0.912,0,0,0,0,0,1,25.0,0,0,1,2,9,5,0,0,5,0,7,1,1,0,2,15,20,5,3,4,4,0,1,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,5,6,15,3,8,13,3,14,0,0,3,0,3,3,0,1,12,56,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15409836873381966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226037570645788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159755944640449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749853343263994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812769653798867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133032525023712,0.14316871611338547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17721666773174174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937219347662813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013328363536571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845862429183572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894466336681917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19063017390848389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193922136545789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19689599290655965,0.0,0.1168572317313168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35461055929041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SWISiberia,2020/02/01,"Alternative to Traditional Therapy? TL;DR I think that I might be a maladaptive perfectionist and I want to get better, but I don’t have the time, money, interest or patience to go to a therapist about it. Solutions?",2.713076923076926,5.729722743589747,5.70397435897436,65.74519230769232,90.79487179487178,10.805128205128208,29.57692307692308,9.725611199111238,4.91026153846154,173,9,27,8,6,62,32,39,0.0,0.706,0.294,0.8504,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,8,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,5,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3535438305968169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088513641938242,0.0,0.2271854928006665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4240685084870093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4571456545906075,0.4641372011541505,0.0,0.2561418047656525,0.0,0.0,0.23309575248228376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357812005051684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flaxinguranus,2020/02/01,"poem I've been writing about wanting to kill myself Clawing at the walls,
their closing in, 
where did the air go,
it's getting thin, 
which way is up,
i do not know, 
it's getting dark, 
spinning, 
alone, 
falling fast, 
losing forever, 
this is it, 
i have the answer, 
goodbye
goodbye
Goodnight forever.
hopefully tomorrow will be better.",4.98,7.212943666666668,5.6099999999999985,76.215,70.66666666666666,7.466666666666668,37.0,8.238735603445708,3.4839,260,15,40,4,5,84,49,60,0.166,0.748,0.085,-0.6486,0,1,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,1,2,2,4,1,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,7,14,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,2,1,4,2,5,10,0,13,0,1,0,0,2,8,0,1,2,27,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659053421332028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124592402615885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3691623665073577,0.0,0.20078474105776115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35089999247087506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3908667248264851,0.0,0.1941607747209603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952448672785104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083815595182203,0.2804278008622717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HealthyReflection5,2020/02/01,I don’t wanna see myself like this again Hey im here to share my story and here it goes.... i was in 8th standard and my whole life started to change i used to get so depressed abt every little thing and make it look lyk a big deal if my parents asked me to come for dinner i used to say no and when they asked me over n over again or even raised their voice a little i used to make a big issue out of it start crying not eat for days. This continued till i was in 12th standard i used to harm myself for the slightest inconvenience and hurt my parents to the most it never used to be my intention to do that but at that situation I reacted in that way my parents cried looking at me in situations i used to hurt myself feel so guilty that im good for nothing that I cannot make my parents happy. Everything changed when i moved to another country for my higher studies i met a guy there who literally changed my life I looked at life differently I understood things from my parents side my parents speak to him occasionally n tell me im lucky to have him in my life that he helps me understand and guide me its been a year everything was going good and exactly after a 1 yr 2 months i fell into a fight with the guy over a simplest thing n it was actually my fault but I fought so badly i cried so loud harmed my self n my whole body was shivering I looked at myself in the mirror n it was the same me a year ago it didn’t change I dint change I donot understand me I cannot control myself im always letting myself n my family down i feel terrible i want to seek help can anyone pls suggest me things. Thankyou,1.3076000696136418,3.4028720502958585,3.2988931430560378,89.1174869474417,81.45562130177515,6.3433344935607385,22.071353985381137,7.510576382923642,0.8545907413853113,1275,41,274,20,34,430,165,338,0.153,0.762,0.086,-0.9757,7,0,0,0,1,2,7.0,0,0,2,1,12,16,2,0,14,0,16,7,1,12,2,42,45,18,0,3,5,6,2,1,0,0,4,4,0,3,21,11,2,1,5,0,0,4,7,10,0,0,11,11,58,6,42,32,4,41,0,3,5,0,29,21,0,4,16,181,79,0,0.0,0.0,0.06465163441567959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05872770965887465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05512632278274365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947018131026628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04632439383500493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387189593738135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055317001854475606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359017077653163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504250337846159,0.0570695602307426,0.0,0.0,0.07430637731663316,0.0,0.0,0.2183215646112315,0.04272655643617618,0.06830209931875257,0.057062079191740285,0.0,0.0,0.06921842463446087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779153827092957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043758306351483665,0.0,0.05581951071573979,0.0,0.11908465027668272,0.0,0.06245575453882471,0.0,0.06699721548583876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034613528325691936,0.0,0.03765209540572724,0.11113676108015154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311982487181519,0.0,0.07052565622537445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881359325469314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418466037052903,0.0,0.2862507478967299,0.0691490616599204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774636168282602,0.18718078545902644,0.032366999888495826,0.13280225564781442,0.0,0.0,0.22253735790539567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266961252416964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05288109217958888,0.07041456271257224,0.0,0.0,0.05109702555610498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356983293515585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4413848407887617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052685629720697694,0.0,0.0,0.052793645213984934,0.0,0.06911447190115713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893829545947807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378590981479973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057906486912500776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17605746840164013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13793971416099007,0.0,0.34331869853592073,0.0,0.0,0.03907668639778331,0.0525871351421423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14793424358141222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532722782150667
mentalhealth,duckduckHJONK,2020/02/01,"Feeling ok You know that thing when you feel okay but it's not like... right. When you're not feeling down or worried about something and it's just weird cause you feel like you should.

I'm not scared or depressed and I'm just generally relaxed. And it doesn't feel right. It's like I NEED to feel upset about something",0.2976923076923086,2.7144145384615435,0.7419230769230758,101.32057692307691,95.92307692307692,3.2153846153846155,18.80769230769231,4.935628992294339,-0.7114307692307693,255,8,56,1,10,76,37,65,0.128,0.588,0.284,0.8991,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,4,0,0,6,10,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,22,12,8,0,2,8,0,6,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,7,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,6,5,6,4,11,0,5,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,2,5,30,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21766345908322654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824955673275144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6428101651379196,0.15137012837331554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644602549847215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105477801199181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710946359592118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36189593058053904,0.0,0.0,0.21213306669638496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32623764698898816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407664601137335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151787094754307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elainabash,2020/02/01,"Worst week of my life This has been the worst week of my life so far. I keep trying to tell myself it's going to be okay but I'm just dreading everything ahead. I thought I was going to die at school, then my best friend broke up with me, then I failed my driving test for the second time. I thought I would pass and everything would be okay, but no. it's my birthday month too. my 16TH BIRTHDAY MONTH...AND IT SUCKS. I keep thinking I'm getting better, then something happens that ruins any hope I had before. I've never felt so lonely or hopeless. I'm going back to therapy next week, but it feels so far away.",2.1279870129870133,3.875615420634922,3.112193362193364,93.15149350649351,77.33333333333334,5.534199134199136,22.56565656565657,6.1124844417494595,0.2689301587301589,477,14,103,3,11,152,77,126,0.271,0.593,0.136,-0.9731,0,2,1,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,4,6,15,1,1,2,2,8,2,0,0,1,18,25,11,1,3,5,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,6,2,0,2,5,0,0,5,2,9,0,1,6,2,16,6,12,15,3,22,0,5,0,0,2,5,1,2,12,64,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720759385816292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811762399732215,0.12122333120872728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414877353447835,0.0,0.16544423859784793,0.13942885796407747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16361609690224865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833718057574226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797127164954972,0.0,0.15136898799389484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12180021230534155,0.0,0.08236576252689022,0.0,0.2687888550089858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394096185746133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15658229588236008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802536181161608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22270610467167332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516698927450089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158961181835692,0.0,0.16766285721681626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15955049603690644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136688469609848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377932900952296,0.0,0.18028683016533145,0.0,0.0,0.10101593133458052,0.0,0.2503134191543989,0.0919271438283011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703418908775104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3793726266915285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22398046597640672,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dzjuben,2020/02/01,"I feel dizzy when thinking of that certain place I lost someone (not dead), a few years ago. And I got scared again or some shit, so I ran away from home and school. Until I came somewhere I stayed for hours. After that I got caught by the police and got home. But after a few months (now), I get dizzy when I think of that specific location. I saw the one who I've lost also there, mostly sitting next to me or screaming at me.



So when I think of that specific place I just get dizzy and see everything turning, it's not that drastic but I wanna know why.",1.9944736842105253,3.730628271929824,3.036701754385966,93.59557894736844,77.6842105263158,5.963508771929827,21.92631578947368,6.742157984588678,0.35029052631578983,429,12,95,4,10,137,71,114,0.133,0.852,0.015,-0.7992,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,10,6,1,1,4,0,0,1,1,0,1,21,18,15,1,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,7,5,0,0,5,0,0,3,2,5,0,1,9,4,15,1,13,9,4,22,0,2,2,0,1,4,1,4,13,64,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404015787059175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12666298271008128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488109234843699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18115390054498404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423490971775172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008583067304104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655025898247252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3800325269135385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177525485231451,0.0,0.15598046768628585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704601003269792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3457988510763388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264239465293954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16844764277958946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732794038342586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3309639061582672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15857421473060734,0.1602973097790888,0.1262148852175351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16258320657199227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420180405041054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688207421734286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3044662807068333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17228087437893735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14292071072277615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199680493523766
mentalhealth,slimkorra,2020/02/01,"I dont know what to do.. I really can‘t talk about it in real life, so i made this account here. I had a really bad panic attack for the first time about 6 months ago. It felt like I was going crazy and since then everything got worse. Everything feels fake, like I‘m dreaming. I‘m in such a bad mental state, i have no friends left. Went to a psychiatrist, got diagnosed with an anxiety/panic disorder. I hated therapy and stopped going there. I take medication daily. It doesn‘t help. I‘ve read many thing about so called derealisation and it feels somehow like that.  Doing anything that used to bring me joy fills me with so much panic. It was always hard for me to make friends and i always had the feeling that I struggle with my mental health. But now I know what that feels like. I used to smoke and drink alcohol, went to parties and was actually a extrovert. I quit everything because only the thought of drinking or smoking makes me so nervous. I couldnt go to university anymore, every day was so painful that i cried non stop on my way home. I feel like I‘m never going to be happy and I‘m just wasting  my time. Everything is meaningless. I just want to feel alive again. Does anyone know what I should do?
I‘m not suicidal, I want to live I really do. But I just don‘t know how..",2.462612307692304,4.9472751320000015,3.7832000000000012,85.06498461538463,79.67999999999998,7.046153846153848,24.01538461538461,8.139509932561175,1.5846923076923072,1013,36,196,20,26,331,142,250,0.205,0.648,0.147,-0.9563,0,0,4,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,18,19,2,4,8,0,19,8,0,6,1,44,54,17,1,4,7,0,8,5,2,1,6,0,1,0,15,10,3,2,12,4,1,8,8,10,0,1,13,8,28,9,22,38,1,26,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,17,123,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0877306891668359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969206792880988,0.09607713668714768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14961014776111015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915792100288775,0.06286107123372696,0.0,0.07398110035570134,0.0,0.0,0.10227569424902372,0.0,0.0,0.150127641449365,0.05480299104076258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179926713309804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875234398652752,0.05797889373949625,0.0,0.0,0.09124791542815963,0.0,0.0,0.10303466531230783,0.0,0.07867322340726718,0.0,0.10536364058128107,0.1761380739193032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574571297859985,0.0,0.3231899249690514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727407562061335,0.1284509969461968,0.08631933537217594,0.0,0.0,0.07646999007863929,0.0,0.0,0.13891502498267422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20437189613995527,0.0,0.14380454611737464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570159332421904,0.08053389609032825,0.08875891008020359,0.0,0.0955608657100127,0.0,0.0,0.060258938648947824,0.0,0.09017832247634006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976295881683063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976780130113436,0.0,0.06349993877002218,0.2196061423771193,0.0,0.07938448482034484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506677290829723,0.12001961634780373,0.09114579598171764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056609007636378,0.1811987076142793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175835077860257,0.0,0.06608779122806567,0.0,0.06933741593585042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683739810173941,0.09566130948442793,0.2109595834983944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562108649638172,0.08992561707324039,0.1023273482187103,0.17277920241646075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436727486793289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15032300541148766,0.0,0.09398434641079773,0.0,0.09833741805795976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759458060446337,0.07225925030228524,0.0,0.0,0.10280995838365148,0.0,0.059726421363673926,0.0,0.0,0.07137158100381856,0.10484432859181723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529169679229216,0.0,0.0,0.10605221844793536,0.07135945825695619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166678790258395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161709347139607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bewbewboo,2020/02/01,"what is wrong with me? Hey Reddit. 

so, i’m new to all of this and i’m not exactly sure how it works or if any of this is appropriate. However, i will still post it. 

for some background i am 18 years old  and transgender male to female. 

since i can remember i have been treated by the mental health services here in the UK. i was diagnosed with a handful of things before i reached the age of 14. however, doctors have always said to me (whilst i was 13-16) that i show symptoms of several mental health disorders but could not diagnose me with anything because of my age (bipolar, some have speculated BPD, and the most common confirmed, yet somehow undiagnosed, PTSD)

once i reached 18 i had hopes of getting these diagnosis’ (before anyone says anything, i know we shouldn’t want and/or label a diagnosis, however, i feel with diagnosis’ they can open doors for new means of help, ie, medication, specific forms of therapy etc). although, once reaching 18 the adult mental health services refused to put me on their books by stating i wasn’t “severe enough”. to rub salt in the wounds they sent me a list of what IS considered severe enough. this consisted of drug addiction, homicidal thoughts etc. but that is neither here nor there. 

I have been recently taking matters into my own hands and doing research into what could possibly be wrong with me. before i say what i think the issue could be i just want to give an insight on what exactly consists of me being “unstable”. 

*Outbursts of rage - every now and then something inconvenient will happen that will fill me with an almost uncontrollable feeling of pure rage. this could be things such as dropping my phone, not liking how my food tastes or not being able to sleep. i however most get like this when i feel as if someone is on a higher level than me and i feel belittled. usually i’m pretty good with containing it. by “containing” it i mean by clenching my whole body and waiting until i get home to completely break down, scream and smash everything in sight. 

*Self image - growing up male, i was incredibly unattractive. even at the start of my transition i looked like a mess. i was bullied relentlessly for everything i did. however, once i turned about 15 or 16 i started to look good. i started getting compliments everywhere i went but it was never good enough for me and i felt as if it was just something people would say to keep up friendly conversation. then once i got this validation from everybody i couldn’t live without it. if i didn’t get a compliment one day i would completely shut down and feel worthless and ugly. i had/have to be the best looking in the room, i have to be the funniest, the smartest, just the BEST. i cant stop until i’m the physical embodiment of perfection. if i look in the mirror and even the SLIGHTEST imperfection is on my face, or even if i just don’t like how i look a certain day, it will send me into a complete rage. 

*Outlook on life - my days consist of a cycle of either “the world is beautiful, nature is great, i’m a practicing buddhist! drinking water everyday to keep healthy :)”  to  “everything and everyone is pointless, i don’t care about anyone other than myself and why should i? no one cares for me why should i return the favour. if i can’t be happy then no one can”. 

me and my mum are really into psychology and enjoy psycho-analysing one another. we were discussing yesterday about me and she said something very interesting. she told me she is no longer assuming i am bipolar, she however thinks i am a narcissist with slight sociopathic tendencies. her reasons for this were:

-My inability to feel bad for anyone or anything except for certain circumstances
-My selfishness 
-My desire to strip anyone else of happiness for my own expense 
-My manipulation 

i know from the outside it looks as if my mother is being toxic and rude but i assure you it is not like that. 

if anyone relates or if anyone can help me to better understand myself i would be more than happy to elaborate in the reply section. i could not possibly write every detail in this post as it would just be too much to read.",4.656005251312827,6.602016091731268,5.591371176127363,77.21038259564894,70.89922480620154,8.921196965908143,30.57172626489956,9.454032385205345,3.0290344919563217,3261,140,575,76,62,1070,353,774,0.113,0.701,0.187,0.9969,6,1,5,0,0,0,90.0,2,1,3,5,25,42,4,1,33,0,72,23,5,5,10,132,124,55,0,27,34,2,10,5,1,11,14,6,3,4,32,33,4,7,19,4,1,6,21,12,0,4,22,25,95,30,97,74,21,68,0,1,7,0,35,27,0,24,35,429,127,7,0.0539699686429061,0.0,0.0,0.0588352320873399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054043127650052064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04490733735494348,0.0,0.0,0.036701429386259636,0.056592217850340486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22642234163636624,0.05529861075047949,0.13323805696128094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04506266948973036,0.03289959195357737,0.0,0.1377734047172848,0.0,0.11327630481653747,0.04773205144166922,0.0,0.05994846850376352,0.06797328619742234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005195988259983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697594559013919,0.0,0.0,0.21545314192521506,0.0,0.0,0.1044184948517021,0.0,0.0,0.1095567642272693,0.0,0.0,0.061854259803575326,0.055240549809397764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052870022688395656,0.06258802929474526,0.0,0.04508498352603129,0.0,0.0,0.16729621407037054,0.12038156270751355,0.10693996585722787,0.0,0.09094405257461832,0.05157061787049221,0.14551418343773012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637330265718113,0.0,0.051819633518474996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526070031079502,0.0,0.04169706389521356,0.0,0.1409854054380459,0.05177291171910415,0.0,0.1358023473295525,0.043164714174195484,0.0595020809595307,0.0,0.0,0.04772546503236328,0.1723561055635878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721026587536931,0.0,0.0,0.07234986468645306,0.0,0.05413627899110411,0.05360435645135303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05633062542513526,0.0,0.09594197580016746,0.0,0.0,0.05932096665905213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03812058493407748,0.13183500275254148,0.0,0.04765647108734816,0.0,0.2719270858566241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757823538117697,0.0,0.05436906547905528,0.16316710355985733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03967413681671772,0.0,0.04162496696043855,0.10424906404695998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05663240336481192,0.2299050208618592,0.14628579002479994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037415980804200916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216860610161554,0.10337662256526743,0.0549068606637985,0.0,0.0,0.06308800521826219,0.05425472509148388,0.0,0.0,0.05398457368289823,0.0,0.03457454389267467,0.055490116450491817,0.05328883304933904,0.0,0.06113745365579432,0.0,0.10267559835573102,0.12875725578229394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05630244770735186,0.18291210787699813,0.0,0.04464451577167924,0.0,0.05400894510881042,0.0,0.04572857929196635,0.12464615578624001,0.0,0.0,0.11460066476205925,0.0,0.04310048667407538,0.045121310400693504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05086605673759571,0.05609546215189543,0.04057869977399496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061719362672569535,0.0,0.07171049807302472,0.06916355338910671,0.0,0.04284612659846988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05157061787049221,0.0,0.0,0.05870382801685167,0.0,0.05618464071043697,0.0,0.0,0.05944029564042329,0.04453087632275832,0.06366577163851407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05003070163395225,0.09739900441719376,0.06025554261111029,0.0,0.05202512384893922,0.0,0.039290779951259895,0.0,0.0,0.15335486899949127,0.11801537672680465,0.0,0.03475489033110335
mentalhealth,melione-flor19,2020/02/01,"I feel lost in my life Alright, so I started my 2nd semester of my first year of College and I don’t know what I am doing with myself. Like I successfully made friends, joined a few clubs, went to some events in 1st semester. But now that I am back in school, I feel like a mess and I don’t think I am satisfied with my life. Lately, I’ve been feeling sad and my anxiety as been all over the place. I don’t know what to do!",1.0097826086956516,2.46151323913044,3.003695652173913,94.01032608695654,79.65217391304348,6.773913043478261,22.369565217391305,7.645422480735847,0.6657347826086957,326,10,80,5,8,110,56,92,0.10400000000000001,0.703,0.193,0.807,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,3,8,0,0,3,1,10,2,0,1,1,15,20,6,0,0,1,0,3,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,6,1,0,1,3,3,0,1,5,3,16,5,11,15,3,13,0,2,0,0,1,5,0,1,9,54,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18484678725351264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18579905626286372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665271532138773,0.17262098592478414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055309089825482,0.0,0.0,0.18668324218860985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655877740817501,0.0,0.2725698999188483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413417504649177,0.2360970624659633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637683999039493,0.0,0.0,0.2286367651162829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524526026665573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24454311966469705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17102741900896787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15482716505424732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22399403501092366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560221758598985
mentalhealth,Random_person991,2020/02/01,"*brags about how good this title is* I brag about the things that I am good at. Especially at school things. Grades, amount of homework done, progress on a project.  I hate that I think like that, I hate that I think like I'm better than  them if I had a better grade or something. Then again it's the only thing that I can talk about, because I'm not that good in being social, and school is the first thing that pops into my head. 

On the other hand, I don't even want to make the conversation about me. This is why I almost never can strike up a conversation myself, but when I do, I'll only say about the good things I've done. Which makes their opinion of me lobsided.",3.3661313868613116,4.4430603941605895,3.8785474452554745,91.65650729927007,72.7956204379562,6.647883211678832,20.9992700729927,6.742157984588678,0.13469109489051068,522,10,117,4,10,164,82,137,0.044000000000000004,0.7859999999999999,0.16899999999999998,0.907,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,4,9,10,2,0,9,0,12,2,2,3,1,15,21,7,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,17,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,2,17,8,16,17,1,12,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,4,7,83,34,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13813235126577178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409021072317101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440029207439917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28233199252881364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111160888511856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11733625222989465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4628080907409392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723849669683813,0.14157173597391795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478626941992322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18415919711561274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639196522520107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098273237480127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096996865102762,0.0,0.2792161365130596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061792203198115,0.0,0.10619707706089453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087525460239868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4582238362205966,0.17677963261853966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813637470107558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447423082367905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,normalteen4407,2020/02/01,why do i burst into tears randomly? most of the times i don't have any particular reason. i just start to cry. negative thoughts and regrets come after i start crying. it's wierd and i don't know how to cope with that,1.0726666666666669,3.3858175999999998,2.8666666666666667,90.54000000000002,84.1111111111111,6.266666666666668,20.11111111111111,7.554174236665415,0.6722444444444444,172,5,37,3,5,57,35,45,0.309,0.691,0.0,-0.9231,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,0,13,9,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,6,8,1,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,4,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20339458813721725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25764351899978305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.657082759502038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437457318810364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30751906859953065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4234014024216157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374477075825681,0.1744044697274435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698863602820167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MurmDawg,2020/02/01,"Question for anyone that’s ever taken Antidepressants Hi everyone - 

I have been on a slew of antidepressants in the past year, and just switched to a new psychiatrist. I told her my history with antidepressants, and that I have a tendency to be sensitive to medications. She started me on a low dose of Zoloft recently, and since starting it, I have been extremely itchy all over, very irritable, and my entire body hurts. It’s almost like a musculoskeletal pain or arthritis kind of pain, but my entire body. I have spoken to her about it but she hasn’t wanted to do anything about it yet.

I was wondering if this or anything similar has happened to anyone else on antidepressants or specifically on Zoloft?

I hope you are all well!",6.647056384742952,7.969248365671643,7.2121890547263705,69.87352404643451,65.34328358208955,11.0301824212272,33.54560530679934,10.980518767755715,4.0243475953565495,587,25,101,17,9,193,83,134,0.091,0.847,0.062,-0.1822,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,0,6,0,12,8,2,0,3,20,20,10,0,3,7,0,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,5,0,16,4,19,14,2,15,0,2,0,0,8,7,0,8,9,76,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16934268962466856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364961096262588,0.1732767122145786,0.2783319163451657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3756938333045298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127258550652474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15297279549874032,0.0,0.16159514660855745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14954646341902975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16796781185299942,0.0,0.0,0.18103944360006785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761056320466952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262028836434099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17036400706157262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333082173630942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3598972637724077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614379215486102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18944576501133786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16697912774347556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398923916232634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393987376063518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16159514660855745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395363054608868,0.09974749311428432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205329931662648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18339632028559816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890351580667183
mentalhealth,helcel,2020/02/01,"Bedtime anxiety For about 6 weeks I have struggled with bedtime anxiety. I feel fine during the days and usually all evenings aswell, but as soon as I go to bed i feel my pulse raising and a general sense of unease. Does anyone else experience this?",4.387340425531914,6.57666895744681,5.311648936170212,77.90875,72.19148936170212,8.955319148936171,33.026595744680854,9.516144504307137,3.472578723404256,199,10,35,5,4,65,39,47,0.175,0.794,0.031,-0.6757,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,4,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,5,1,7,4,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4522085813141989,0.0,0.0,0.2066639776186124,0.3028384241206505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190613181782724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586484920209271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469043105646269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952160599588436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891165668251951,0.0,0.0,0.2988902799460291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797482186033755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30898580762206074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3255200305525809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370821862575644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,athrowaway9551,2020/02/01,"Kept thinking about the past Sometimes I feeel like I'm over exagerating things that happened to me, and when I'm down, I get stuck in a cycle of self pity for days until, one day I wake up and feel fine again. Then it relapses. 
Sine I could remember, I was physically bulied by my older brothers as a child. Had no one to talk to. People made fun of me when I talk (follow tv shows as example). I spent my days lonely and the only company I felt like I had was my neighbour's dog when I was in kindergarden. In primary school, I'd always get in trouble for not doing my work, slow in copying stuff on the board. Its not like I want to forget, I just do. The worse was when I actively tried my best and hardest to finish all my homework but forgot a few as they werent written on the homework section on the board. I feel isolated from people my age, i can't remember people I've talked to. I tried to be social, and everyone says im annoying. I sometimes actively try to get into fights even though im a girl, but not on purpose, I was just frustrated and i wanted to vent by baiting them on. I cried (no sound, just tears) that day out of guilt and anger, because I couldnt understand why I'd do that, and what the guy said snapped me out of it, I was unreasonable, im sorry. My classmate berated the person i provoked which honestly made me cry more as it wasnt his fault.  I couldn't stop talking in a condescending way(like make fun of others), it was traumatic as in my head I'm just screaming at myself to stop talking. I tried my damn hardest to practice speaking politely, and smile nicely after that. I'd always thought relationships were somethibg that could make me happy(barbie for ex. Or other disney shows or anime), and was heart broken when i relised I cant understand whether a guy liked me or not. (Apparently, sex doesn't equal love, but really I didnt even know what sex was when I was 8, but thank god my instincts were screaming at me to not talk to my classmate anymore). When i was 9 people just kept blaming me for stuff, usually they were adults. It got to the point where I believed everything was my fault. I made my friend cry once, when I was roleplaying to myself to be a ""strict and upright "" person for a day. It haunts me, as I realised well aparently sticking to rules too firmly is annoying to others. My childhood friend got a new friend, and i knew she dislikes me, she picked her. This happened a around 4 times in my whole childhood. Sometimes, i get the ""you don't have problems, your family is rich"" from people around me, yea, but that's not my money, my family doesn't buy stuff, we just have a nice house, I realised people dont really care much i guess my feeling arent that important. When I was 11, i transfered, was bullied by a prefect and the first person I met. People at my old school asked me""are we not good enough that you'd tranfer/are you looking down on us-as it was a public to private school transfer"" i forgot all my old classmates in 3 months, despite knowing every single one of them for 5 years. I felt insecure of my memory. I've at most remembered 5 names out of 40 of them. My parents were nice, mean when I'm not listening to them, but decent, which is why I was super hurt when my mom would randomly say""you'd be slapped by your husband in the future"" "" you know that aunt I dont like? You remind me of her"" , as she would be super caring at other tines, I honestly hate the idea of dating even till now, so i've never dated even tho I get the ocasional crush(my mom says that as one of my aunt(on my dads side) is in an abusive relationship, my parent have never fought verbally nor physically) . my dad doesn't talk much to me when I was young. 
Now that I'm older, I get along with my dad, as I realised he's just not interested in others life too much, so I'd ask him about his. I get along with my mom, although her random snide comments do hurt. My parents chabged alot when I off handly said they didnt feel like parents to me at secondary school, apparently they were so shocked they went around asking for advice to be more caring.My brothers dont bully me anymore. The friends I make? They are at a distance, my memory has been much better. But the memories do pop up randomly at times and I'd drown in it for hours at times. I'd complained casually once, and the response was the generic look forward as they are in the past. But its when it creep up on me that it sucks",5.3434589084462445,5.339727869127518,6.075067747245793,81.55096935545147,67.84787472035794,9.029049005951627,30.961884259845508,8.733022093515281,2.2911559073065724,3481,126,707,51,53,1143,364,894,0.151,0.72,0.129,-0.9744,9,2,1,0,1,0,118.0,2,7,11,6,42,54,9,2,35,1,67,8,4,8,4,110,132,61,1,9,28,15,7,6,5,2,1,9,2,9,38,28,0,6,19,4,4,3,29,23,1,5,51,18,132,31,112,69,17,105,0,4,2,3,86,49,2,9,61,484,170,9,0.0,0.058625658723255765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048351241898797165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234257694559183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814164453886916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13214295784958954,0.13877124313395722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030162522891348874,0.0,0.0,0.055746968238097945,0.05192616282137058,0.043761001543480865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089622886145803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901143983186337,0.0,0.163054230042982,0.15955239635842924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739704253688408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051126023018297266,0.0,0.1307241813300754,0.0,0.04168899832381792,0.047280219895571934,0.044469395397057736,0.0,0.09329060082741496,0.0,0.10007421305833933,0.035348491589851865,0.09501703756251943,0.0,0.0,0.04208762665038809,0.0,0.0,0.1529123699790641,0.0,0.18095864942094733,0.0,0.0,0.04150144086697039,0.07914728433196465,0.0,0.054507751706659884,0.09798587448665334,0.0875099261759932,0.0,0.0,0.04885121425423688,0.05078071145687662,0.0,0.0,0.058633987982504125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048727791249068564,0.05709322775419135,0.10593863594081378,0.05585684939954132,0.16034053500616002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157867203863807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034949157342989326,0.14504044769973587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310140506201992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044657593552752436,0.1404573967448906,0.09908476773126046,0.0,0.0,0.05389817936364298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17385098494287285,0.03949443008311622,0.0,0.14549384826624076,0.0,0.07632398727421594,0.04778805137089572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384178413480306,0.1053890799674164,0.13411559926117267,0.03763173740053414,0.0,0.0,0.21976654938817186,0.0,0.09446843658976793,0.2401222074033613,0.1296119713136018,0.0,0.0,0.04677455325954215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04734563700072386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339625567953891,0.0,0.0,0.10624591419190553,0.1681534392293119,0.0,0.09413354093137707,0.11804534477025365,0.0,0.20030543476539325,0.0,0.0,0.051618386945596006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504385856064317,0.0,0.0,0.14681082977137214,0.055388761539767295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273492022447951,0.0,0.0,0.16992814039801424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27839080951134176,0.0,0.04555449710819489,0.0,0.0,0.032872285205386036,0.03170475891144178,0.04861380711007392,0.03928155936266727,0.08655648353645372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437457301934047,0.0,0.0,0.1030207617141279,0.059518296675951626,0.0,0.05449518281116136,0.0,0.05836912193779543,0.03927488723359551,0.0,0.0,0.04448842417867895,0.0458684164057008,0.08929593122229444,0.05524260561963105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036021998429982466,0.0,0.0504243039766645,0.07029828444717226,0.0,0.0,0.031863470424721686
mentalhealth,throwaway_12q,2020/02/01,"How do you stop comparing yourself with your peers? (specific techniques please!) A decade of severe depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder has definitely withered away a lot of my life. 

I think it's natural to get jealous and maybe even angry and bitter at the hand you've been dealt. This obviously is ignoring the fact that all of us have a choice, however difficult it may seem, in responding differently to our natural inclination to depression. 

BUT at the end of the day, if you don't remind yourself that everyone moves through life in different, winding paths at our own pace, you are sunk. That's just how life works for everyone. If you can't find a way to think positively, you crash and burn. 

**What are specific ways you snap yourself out of comparison?**",4.755362479247374,7.4472084100719425,5.643309352517985,73.64705589374655,72.81294964028775,10.60785832872164,32.99446596568899,10.560738912317856,4.397789817376866,615,31,105,22,13,201,95,139,0.16899999999999998,0.7509999999999999,0.081,-0.8443,3,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,3,7,0,1,4,6,2,0,8,0,10,5,1,2,3,23,14,9,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,7,6,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,6,0,0,1,2,12,0,19,12,3,13,0,2,0,0,11,7,0,5,3,70,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117191306916615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16109904730888794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058213728707747,0.0,0.29536883855795376,0.0,0.0,0.3582933881955595,0.1965162280620068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186901539418818,0.0,0.0,0.11325244634769398,0.0,0.0,0.32768845136678704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15671788381877005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958451746560568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36333699182004864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577525325989332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17226181553298686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822424620744384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18821945822620026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15609726855250153,0.0,0.19370909199035646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14335422901054173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21973847354336684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20625388914020465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722053113037119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248301393979272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vomitsmearedthighs,2020/02/01,"I feel like someone else has taken over my body, I can't tell if I'm faking or not, please help me out I've avoided researching too much into this because I don't want my brain to latch on to information and convince me that I'm experiencing these things. Also sorry in advance if this is a jumbled mess, I still haven't completely figured out what's going on.

I don't know how to describe this other than it feeling like I've infiltrated someone else's body and adopted her memories as my own. They're my memories, I know that, but I don't feel a connection to them. It doesn't feel like I progressed from a baby into who I am in a time line, it's like there are two timelines, me now and the person I'm supposed to have been before. I'm watching the timeline of the kid from my own timeline but they're not connected. Maybe this is normal, all I know is that I definitely felt a connection to the memories before and now I don't.

Right now, I can't tell if I'm in a stranger's body, or if something else has come into my mind with me and is interfering with my ability to know who I am. It's progressed more and more this whole week. It went from random jolts of who the fuck am I every one or two hours (dk if it's normal, but this definitely hasn't happened before) to me feeling like I'm something without an identity or face, and I'm just in this shell that's my body. Usually I can sleep off any strange moods I'm in but this was the first thing I felt in the morning.

I've also started experiencing bursts of not recognizing my own voice, and feeling like I don't know my family.

Looking in the mirror doesn't do anything, because it's like I'm starting at a statue or something, it seems to not be registering that I have a face. When looking at pictures of myself, my face looks lopsided and kind of deformed.

It's so hard to explain most of these things so I don't know if I'm faking but there is definitely something that feels off.

Before this, I would space out without knowing it. I'd realize that I'd been staring at someone in class for too long (not because they're attractive or something stands out about their appearance). My eyes just rest on them and I don't realize it. Or I'll be paying attention in class, and genuinely think I'm paying attention but I'm not. An example would be me thinking I was paying attention in my foreign language class, then out of nowhere everyone is staring at me waiting for me to clear my desk to take the test. I could've sworn I was completely paying attention, but idk what happened. I'm not daydreaming during this time, and my mind isn't particularly preoccupied with something. Again, these things might be normal, but up until maybe a few years ago, I've never experienced them.

Just in general I feel slow too. Slow to react to certain things, it's like I've been sedated. Bumping into people in the halls of school has become more common, etc. My mom even says I've started seeming generally apathetic to everything. The way I talk has been really affected. I'll start sentences and forget what direction I was taking when speaking, so I'll either have weirdly long pauses in the middle of sentences, or I'll mush two words together, or my sentences will end up just not making any sense. Even if I knew exactly what I wanted to say, the words just won't be put in the right order or I'll just forget what I wanted to say. 

I'm not sure what this is, how real or how serious it is, but even if I'm not focused on trying to figure out what's going on, I feel off, so can anyone confirm if I'm making this up or what? I'm definitely not making up the thing about the speaking abilities worsening because people have been commenting on it but idk what to do about it.

And this isn't because of substances, last time I've taken anything was over 3 months ago.",5.292188213921996,5.493666214747739,6.410025047480115,78.39944537722607,67.96507115135834,9.373031295587792,31.970741240263138,9.252503621752664,2.7104044424871327,3036,120,598,54,47,1021,278,773,0.068,0.847,0.085,0.9384,0,1,6,0,0,0,72.0,0,0,4,4,33,21,1,1,27,0,59,11,10,8,6,149,126,59,0,17,51,1,12,8,0,5,0,6,0,2,57,28,0,2,33,0,4,7,30,7,0,5,16,28,63,13,88,100,14,90,0,0,7,1,23,48,1,27,40,401,120,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305350561936877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929694987819195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07905774139606976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04064428195922439,0.0,0.09566838882941273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177170717612152,0.06419754504810626,0.1978497728569477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25826735357807684,0.0,0.06488980516942201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05007191903187898,0.12189170275399193,0.0,0.0,0.04641028717990833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567485632241334,0.0,0.05148394292412889,0.0,0.06482781878345857,0.115178513575965,0.0,0.048975145588243035,0.05554356655067071,0.05224148339749781,0.0,0.05479767973852925,0.0,0.2645202820947122,0.20763242000812304,0.1116235322288688,0.0,0.0,0.049443443727184365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05373817829403385,0.0,0.0,0.06607069214879159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028043739884506,0.0,0.052071056310825016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03896181285083439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05724413554098785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06053111803678112,0.22361848052956168,0.047381883342614985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22718630263403525,0.0,0.0,0.10288247844554456,0.14643803791663967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640219531116125,0.0,0.1167942974528102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06166436846129509,0.11738493629459182,0.06807853103194839,0.046397024179403765,0.0,0.042730592527584606,0.0,0.04483171266907532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708585919700932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03938887514429525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059694088117064,0.050754918725853235,0.0,0.06380682602949825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058434454700056065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616211769088579,0.03723813207909374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928158040827208,0.0,0.13867658563613244,0.0,0.058828397324113525,0.0,0.10583466079515984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05816974007401204,0.0,0.14775438953724018,0.26849754123887176,0.0,0.06506926933796743,0.16457251338860193,0.0,0.04642090494164082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054784726734705566,0.0,0.08740968421579484,0.04672089237118341,0.10161245022320617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23170500877670264,0.07449184417755064,0.0,0.0,0.10168429449604392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0394649340448431,0.0,0.17034712831666304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401951640343767,0.0,0.10285577825198912,0.04613911097806902,0.0466265835817048,0.0,0.0,0.05388501671166139,0.0,0.06489756918312904,0.0,0.11206617442773954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258458715322478,0.0,0.0,0.03743237222626816
mentalhealth,Dani281099,2020/02/01,autism diagnosed at older age Anyone here who got diagnosed with autism in their 20s? How did it happen? Did you notice some symptomps yourself and decided to get it checked out? Did a doctor made you realize there IS something wrong?,5.0150000000000015,7.84068930952381,4.800238095238097,79.3489285714286,72.57142857142857,8.009523809523811,29.54761904761905,8.841846274778883,2.8582190476190483,189,8,30,4,4,58,36,42,0.092,0.9079999999999999,0.0,-0.6199,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,2,0,8,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,3,0,5,3,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,21,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20771710282980035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6030362594847626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040620518860613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520595581106095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23759270329797455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262696567558205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810932627904633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382142941038132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286977351410916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247976144831383,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,landlessjanitor,2020/02/01,"How can we convince my grandmother (Fmid-90s) to get help for an undiagnosed mental health condition and possible eating disorder? (UK-based) TL:DR! my grandmother self-neglects, doesn't eat, seems depressed, refuses to see a doctor. What are our options?

Does anyone have experience of very elderly relatives self-neglecting/having depression and having to stage an intervention and get them help against their will? How do you go about doing that kindly?

(For the record, there is no suggestion at all of dementia or alzheiemers - she is incredibly clear in her mind/memory)

My grandmother has always seemed to have a tricky relationship with food, usually only eating mouthfuls, or just pushing food around her plate. It's something we've always kept an eye on but we figured she'd got by like that for her entire adult life and she just doesn't manage large quantities of food. She's tiny in stature but she's hardy, stubborn, and has lived independently (without nurses or additional help) to a very old age.

Things got really bad when my granddad died a couple of years ago (he wasn't the nicest, and was a bit controlling towards her). She went downhill very quickly, and during that time she really wasn't looking after herself or the house and ended up being hospitalised.

Side note: no matter how ill she gets, she flat out *refuses* to see a doctor. The woman got through shingles in her late 80s without telling a soul. She won't even see an optician or anything. In the end, her cough got so bad that she had to go to the doctor and they immediately admitted her to hospital where she stayed for many weeks. I think that episode reinforced why she doesn't see doctors - she is convinced they will send her away to hospital.

Anyway, she seemed to be doing a lot better after she was discharged. She wanted to move nearer to us and we found her a really nice flat, nearer to the family. She started eating again and taking pride in the new flat, enjoying making little decisions about decorating for the first time without her husband.

Trouble is that she absolutely refuses to let anyone help her (medical profession, cleaners, carers, etc.) and only accepts very limited help from family. We do everything that she'll let us: my mum or my uncle will visit her at least once a week and take her food shopping and also stay and eat with her. But we can't supervise every meal and she won't allow us to clean.

That was working well until recently - she seems to have gotten bad again. She clearly isn't eating - she is incredibly thin and ill. She is evasive about the topic of her health and food and is very good at brushing everything off. She lies that she doesn't need to go food shopping and that she has food in the house. She'll say she doesn't want bread, doesn't like it anymore, doesn't like eggs, that she has 'loads of bread in the freezer' - but when we check there is none anywhere in the house. She's funny about us looking in her fridge/freezer/cupboards and also won't let us near her bins or take the bins out like she's hiding something - we suspect she's throwing food away.

When we bring up seeing a doctor, she lies about having been (a. it's highly unlikely she would have gone at all, let alone on her own. and b. the doc has apparently told her she's in 'perfect health' and sent her away - which they really wouldn't have done given her BMI).

The flat is also in a bad way - she isn't washing herself or cleaning anything in the house (note - she is very elderly, but is so adamant that she will not accept someone coming in to help)

She says she feels lonely and isolated, but then also blocks any suggestions of going to local community centers, meeting new people, or being moved into a nursing home where she might enjoy a bit more community. She says she doesn't want to meet or see people.

She talks often about how 'it doesn't matter' - ' I wont be here much longer anyway' - 'I thought I'd be dead by now...'

I'm convinced this is more than just 'being elderly' and not being able to cope with day-to-day tasks and I suspect she's severely depressed and/or dealing with an eating disorder.

I know she's really old and would die naturally soon even if she was looking after herself, but self-neglecting and living with depression is such a horrible way to live your last few years. I have no idea how hard it would be to tackle an eating disorder in your mid-90s but it seems wrong for us, her family, not to help her try.

So far we haven't insisted or forced things on her. At which point can you? We can't force her to allow a cleaner or a carer into her own home against her will. We can't force her to see a doctor and talk to them about her mental health if she doesn't want to. We can't force her to eat. We can't force her into a Care Home.

Does anyone have experience of very elderly relatives self-neglecting/having depression and having to stage an intervention and get them help against their will? How do you go about doing that kindly?",5.342589618583308,6.57409696845426,5.750470796290988,79.49873171780902,68.2744479495268,8.918210496128477,28.814979447471558,9.218907990703514,2.4220128286014724,3951,137,729,75,66,1267,372,951,0.131,0.7559999999999999,0.113,-0.9697,1,3,2,0,0,1,126.0,20,5,8,7,46,33,1,0,44,0,94,39,2,11,5,144,149,71,3,11,31,3,3,4,0,17,16,3,5,2,25,57,21,8,18,2,3,16,35,13,1,1,22,18,129,20,109,97,14,103,1,6,11,0,151,48,0,23,37,507,154,9,0.03678383533053353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032606650610894586,0.0,0.0,0.03809695997812707,0.0,0.117664079296776,0.06121419537322936,0.0,0.0,0.025014269396223327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0364796805364857,0.07716033878964128,0.0,0.060539924582276014,0.032745412070137335,0.0,0.0,0.10367887242855296,0.0,0.12285186415666917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03253231314318536,0.08031684250223575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03750357163359338,0.0,0.0,0.031686017073884416,0.0,0.0,0.04125619911619738,0.0,0.04070061415350568,0.0,0.047445061474844605,0.03792251905299083,0.1584093173515331,0.0,0.0763516273089045,0.0,0.12647238627249865,0.22589888475217115,0.06437956435928377,0.037642634617983374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.338751419739239,0.0,0.0,0.06515912016418766,0.0,0.041023699761288564,0.04859075263840823,0.0,0.03099196773978348,0.0,0.06611787871937881,0.07196329843574667,0.10402957881635227,0.0,0.01859901237370528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031288311541120835,0.3558332775282223,0.040331576831482835,0.0,0.0,0.07687214305355343,0.0,0.10452550651080024,0.030852535878004895,0.11767757352453835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03295109137457966,0.0,0.0,0.15639798746668238,0.0,0.0,0.1972434356166837,0.038864141599408486,0.11069155802140754,0.0,0.0,0.16977442911667093,0.0,0.041524472744347576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660940809532964,0.02021543391726109,0.029983735267486895,0.04149376844393362,0.0,0.0,0.15045585522624885,0.02598151072120428,0.07188289567683243,0.036867066461467424,0.09744240152389427,0.0,0.0926674722959716,0.0,0.0,0.03127230139562022,0.0,0.0,0.02455349571429356,0.03729303557391237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03705584423976565,0.07413890872555108,0.0390218363843998,0.03714118779109729,0.0,0.0,0.07819079128487046,0.027040351370280512,0.027274747811305528,0.0,0.07105211475363077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719689494455202,0.03917358413250199,0.0,0.055951528623945535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0510025598027852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03477261397365606,0.041468247462358485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782333408337213,0.0,0.03631959975394256,0.03949207317890992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775594674965258,0.0,0.0,0.20518368037454374,0.1674331109033969,0.15349425002457726,0.04155526382104387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03116682430750365,0.05663598706608644,0.0,0.0,0.026035787972313058,0.07841334843464833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829705990913143,0.05913090698352973,0.03215069339205751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04887509144282963,0.023569596413633136,0.0,0.02920225645816577,0.04289790037800398,0.0,0.0,0.03514853099495724,0.0,0.024973809635066745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26547854897066664,0.0,0.040512197835470665,0.21245361523796247,0.08678423645703832,0.058394592677550976,0.059011547870820885,0.0,0.033073085523182014,0.034098983872881114,0.033191690026216816,0.0,0.0,0.10637491387322848,0.0,0.0267790702139928,0.0,0.0,0.07839054371705134,0.04021734951072885,0.0,0.047375167894899074
mentalhealth,PixieDust91xo,2020/02/01,"I’m using weed as a crutch for my problems.. I’m a 28 F and I’ve struggled with mental health since I can remember. About a year ago I started experimenting with marijuana for the first time to help with my anxiety and sleeping issues, and now I smoke daily. When I’m not high, I’m looking forward to when I can get high. It’s starting to make me worry how I’m relying on it so heavily to feel good. I feel that maybe I’m just the type of person who should completely avoid anything like that because I get hooked. Has anyone else experienced this issue in their life?",4.1321551724137935,5.019149112068966,5.628793103448277,80.53301724137933,70.8103448275862,8.558620689655173,29.15517241379311,8.841846274778883,2.2194000000000003,451,17,91,8,8,153,80,116,0.087,0.836,0.077,-0.0334,0,1,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,7,5,0,2,5,0,4,3,1,3,0,17,19,8,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,0,4,10,2,14,18,0,14,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,11,50,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15016842969597458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959532659099504,0.0,0.0,0.11845279714172115,0.17357673471901305,0.1394069191117035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032684848206672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776192424073655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141517193996436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571183055257044,0.0,0.0,0.1713137921085415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14409687974509952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17701555960886414,0.0,0.0,0.1420899349714472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800709344985223,0.0,0.0,0.11354944635320753,0.3579740332798969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3536322483794049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11965665264707576,0.08276334247424047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14225859385397627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307999521209165,0.0,0.17019135972640487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707216671155011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791901349886133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620989137263584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19190427084130227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401346103562352,0.0,0.16952860497538694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23981324806131796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17710020687529138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987821535841346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14631261842115806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720402820326384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909207839616494
mentalhealth,borrowedcats,2020/02/01,‘You probably feel this more strongly than I do’ is a nicer perspective than ‘This is nothing.’ Just a reminder that we're all processing things differently: [https://medium.com/@cathlynmelvin/a-brief-moment-of-sunlight-25ec9656a08d](https://medium.com/@cathlynmelvin/a-brief-moment-of-sunlight-25ec9656a08d),29.32738095238095,38.567672214285714,15.021428571428574,3.990238095238112,23.285714285714285,10.876190476190477,37.904761904761905,10.504223727775694,5.510890476190476,274,8,20,5,3,64,24,28,0.0,0.8059999999999999,0.19399999999999998,0.6478,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,2,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6081894524893404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29433637084219666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6276217014325346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3867333584927624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fcreveralways,2020/02/01,"Who am I after recovery? Recovery is a strange process. I started it truly about a year ago.

Has anyone noticed that their preferences are changing? I like different colors and different types of music and different activities. 

But the real problem is, everyone spent most of high school trying to figure themselves out, but I'm halfway through college, 20 now, and I don't even know what my personality really is or who I am without my depression. I was severely depressed and suicidal from 12 to 18, and I am still trying to figure out who I really am. I don't know what I truly enjoy or what my place in the world is. I don't have many social skills, and trying to make friends is difficult. I feel as if I lost a lot of years.

I'm trying to remind myself that life is not a race. Just be happy in the little things and be happy that my life can finally begin.",4.5210392156862715,5.66467347647059,6.246764705882352,75.50877450980393,70.11764705882352,9.431372549019608,30.049019607843128,9.725611199111238,2.9896078431372564,681,27,124,16,12,235,100,170,0.129,0.7090000000000001,0.162,0.8078,3,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,2,5,10,0,0,7,0,20,2,0,1,0,28,30,13,1,3,8,0,1,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,11,9,0,0,6,0,1,0,5,5,0,0,3,2,19,5,18,25,2,17,0,3,1,0,7,8,0,5,10,94,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193610291973592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415193197908793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424441475140361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23195144302509305,0.0,0.0,0.42204859265479183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893649203050695,0.0,0.0,0.1286659241514249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808418581447709,0.0,0.0,0.1475048765929705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403193682789706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866794894872167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226741640944113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14800262847170645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19021762748909835,0.06578425144045881,0.13495685431909696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698875589636276,0.11447646446409515,0.0,0.0,0.08988137278570422,0.1365161715355278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153302394357529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117573085933091,0.14068286421826395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884394684904082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326365491397062,0.17252326327508974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13627519041560138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15211863117858265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372609358475106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530750292092792,0.0,0.10753340134924302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472876251435021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945692224490538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656799536502541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297998921774836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342317264697735
mentalhealth,livingbythehour,2020/02/01,"I haven’t smiled in weeks... I can’t seem to pinpoint what’s wrong with me. I have no energy to do anything. I’ve completely withdrawn myself from seeing friends because it doesn’t even feel fun being around them. I go to school. Come home. Go to work. Come home. It’s not like I have no desire to go out and do fun things but I just don’t have the energy and it’s frustrating. Last week, I called off work all week because I just felt god awful. I went in for one day but stayed for two hours before just packing up and crying on my way back home. 

I have my first therapy appointment next week so I’m hoping that’ll help a bit but I get anxiety thinking of the cost of it and if I’ll be able to continue seeing them consistently. I’m not sure if it’s because I haven’t been outside in the sun lately or if I’m super anxious to graduate college and move far away from this place that I have no intention on staying in or if I’m just in a really deep, low place but I hope this improves. I miss having motivation and energy to just live my life.",1.0339680589680604,3.011977581081084,3.0688779688779704,91.03326781326784,81.74774774774775,6.55888615888616,20.9017199017199,7.686295010490155,0.7390918918918921,821,24,183,14,22,277,122,222,0.141,0.674,0.185,0.914,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,5,9,12,1,0,5,1,17,1,0,2,2,39,37,17,0,7,17,0,2,1,1,1,1,0,3,0,11,11,0,0,5,0,1,7,10,4,0,3,3,4,22,8,27,31,2,39,0,2,2,0,5,17,0,9,13,114,33,6,0.11372235581629993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699729092769341,0.12847389229078576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935838090641226,0.10123700721605823,0.0,0.0,0.1068458968004488,0.08744547196063895,0.0,0.20797227771861496,0.0,0.09676934875238599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415535871947495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612324021006773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959234797403804,0.11923572641502793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249186678737679,0.0733415114857497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751125434755844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05750144007518852,0.0,0.1091912956305352,0.0,0.0,0.09673217776225232,0.0,0.0,0.08786161000317258,0.0,0.05941523719687462,0.0,0.1938931066293644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622569793928759,0.0,0.3422183857136284,0.2259039184550577,0.11199361285494012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269889831092357,0.12828377075794542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032546308267054,0.05555899871377098,0.0,0.10041892367593544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086886682905215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094501556263285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706121145882625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376313145168664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285345316326848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509309543291027,0.18124398780509787,0.10352856162217887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424258001185229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071819745080637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300514248775237,0.0,0.07555208000566926,0.07286869369961635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109021712793106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026751270702844,0.3648848568363124,0.0,0.0,0.10542176317723886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655824589219743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433754365062462,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymouspothos,2020/02/01,"Please help! Establishing healthy boundaries with a mom who has depended on me for years Hi all, 

I'm 24years old and have been my mom's only real confidante since before I can remember. There is some debate within me on whether or not this can be considered ""emotional incest,"" but that will have to wait for another time. 

I am currently trying to get a handle on my own mental health. I was just recently diagnosed with a chronic illness, and I'm really making an effort to take everything in stride and re-establish a healthy relationship with myself, my goals, and my environment. I have been depressed for years, and I just got on antidepressants and am actively looking for a therapist. 

That being said, my mother has been going through a really, really rough time, and has been for a number of years. Whenever we talk, it circles back to how difficult things are for her, how depressed she is, her suicidal contempations, etc. I have been actively encouraging her to seek out help, but I haven't heard or seen any progress on this front. While I have tried to be there for her in the past, I've noticed that this relationship is taking a negative toll on my life, and on my perspective of her. I do not think it's healthy for us to continue this way, and I find myself making excuses to avoid talking to her because I am no longer in a position where I am able to shoulder her pain. 

How do I make it clear that I don't want to abandon her, and that I want to be there for her/would even be willing to talk about difficult things when I am in a place to recieve them, but that I need boundaries in my adult life? How do I keep my anger in check regarding our relationship, and the way she has treated me in the past? How do I respond with kindness, let her know that I care, without making her feel abandoned or betrayed? 

Thank you",8.262472245236122,6.81519611549296,8.309610604805304,72.6805385252693,62.492957746478865,12.296603148301575,37.783761391880695,11.326091736570909,4.1464449047224505,1451,60,279,35,17,474,178,355,0.14800000000000002,0.722,0.13,-0.9237,1,1,0,0,0,0,40.0,3,1,1,3,15,14,1,1,14,0,40,9,1,10,2,56,65,25,1,3,12,3,2,0,0,2,7,2,0,1,17,17,0,5,5,0,1,2,7,9,0,0,10,6,51,5,48,47,4,36,0,4,2,1,36,18,0,5,14,211,68,1,0.10258198843415547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975926982149776,0.1075661591615525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887921709760966,0.0,0.06253302801786807,0.0,0.08728971663700978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458917393976372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.176707432646956,0.10411855892677503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11539092983025465,0.0,0.0,0.11440603342810067,0.0677544358869851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921940766798207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05186853559618945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375807899940382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053594855041411364,0.0,0.058299708029981724,0.0,0.08204418719377858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903985675546808,0.0,0.0,0.13751708902380425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117958467793587,0.0,0.10682335521248942,0.05637637809264935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489703331627932,0.1449133842817149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614303435071681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273897095367974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337851680045404,0.0,0.0,0.2402855700881427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606324461227054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679027374112745,0.10764254071381918,0.0,0.0,0.07801822472561143,0.10915446826189218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19585223070867497,0.0,0.0,0.10717634445042168,0.1126042185077252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676076089342065,0.19714994565856994,0.0,0.10128733799543277,0.3304039960224288,0.11620539573236828,0.0,0.0975789620398642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485688088575234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11220804561651232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425777763301196,0.24735454970014364,0.0,0.09444371262536816,0.0,0.11910559507812235,0.13630182986777525,0.06573039610945752,0.0,0.0,0.11963276479690925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13929287297644385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339350149919193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210110291722779,0.16284961524100186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888537620373199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287130136259125,0.0,0.0,0.1981783118069796
mentalhealth,lazypawtato,2020/02/01,Feeling extreme misanthropy after watching Rick and morty I fear that it'll take control over me. I don't know why I feel it to this extreme,2.4130952380952384,4.968523642857143,3.2214285714285715,88.59023809523809,80.42857142857143,5.161904761904762,30.76190476190476,6.42735559955562,1.7033904761904766,114,6,21,1,3,36,24,28,0.125,0.8170000000000001,0.057999999999999996,-0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,5,6,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,13,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4905087853451542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49212385816496507,0.4422597894852579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403480724933762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32882175811539377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3946271325784968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bane_360,2020/02/01,I get clusters of suicidal thoughts and panic attacks when im left alone I can't be alone and even when I'm not I feel so lonely I stopped talking to my only friend (which is my ex girlfriend too) all the people I know are turning so cold and distant and sometiems I manage to hold it together but lately I can't have any peace and feel so socially deprived and feel like I'm little shitty attention seeker and I don't know what to do with all this and what to think of it,1.3267000000000024,3.4075062700000025,2.9419999999999997,91.781,81.3,5.6000000000000005,24.0,6.742157984588678,0.7707999999999999,377,14,80,4,10,124,63,100,0.249,0.7,0.051,-0.9584,0,4,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,1,1,1,0,8,0,0,0,2,23,19,14,1,0,2,1,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,2,8,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,4,10,2,7,17,2,6,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,51,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.418689627044139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745473563112962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22995105887137066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335043800847212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066076752032285,0.14440108658144407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15616445980865956,0.0,0.10560412472430526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21833413946472924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22216976084740064,0.0,0.22801045601041325,0.0,0.21961388466081605,0.0,0.0,0.09875008005581463,0.20258648348615746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372830709825125,0.0,0.23715497587532716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401308841596864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060451872093716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16898899841703266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22109645478471385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16246373336566727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951618105054485,0.0,0.16046794642323867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21985844408590208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WangFuChan,2020/02/01,"Am I okay !!!? So long story short, after 30mn of any human interaction I lose interest and I always wanna go back home and sit alone. Be that with friends in a bar, breakfast, lunch or any social activity.",2.5265384615384607,4.985538000000002,4.550961538461539,79.80028846153847,79.25641025641026,6.976923076923077,22.57051282051281,8.07648339933343,1.4749435897435892,158,5,29,3,4,54,35,39,0.105,0.695,0.19899999999999998,0.6341,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,1,2,3,0,0,0,5,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,3,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,5,2,0,7,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,3,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413477509265045,0.0,0.0,0.27423878345443164,0.0,0.0,0.4482543806315697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534283593798157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546343815903459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187309153183878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33059780796903104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916698658415066,0.0,0.36871816553487213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335967536333232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dooberfloof,2020/02/01,Raised very secluded I was raises in a cult like religion. Kept pretty secluded.parents didn't talk to me and i wasn't aloud to have friends. Over all i feel like my mental health is. Ok. But i have a lot of trouble with language. When i try to speak its difficult to hold onto thoughts long enough. I loose whatever i was trying to say after the first sentence or two. Getting professional help isnt really feasible right now. Im wondering if there are any things i can do to self help.any advice?,1.8886769759450173,4.60387112371134,3.2552835051546403,86.12113831615123,85.18556701030927,6.944673539518901,23.54725085910653,8.07648339933343,1.6817910652920958,397,15,77,9,12,129,77,97,0.077,0.745,0.179,0.8402,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,3,1,11,1,0,0,1,12,16,5,0,1,3,0,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,2,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,6,3,10,4,12,10,3,9,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,4,7,50,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19917858008663072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772203618448633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106090406441904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306167368962066,0.1456149229384334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17337618200141994,0.0,0.0,0.15747717914805626,0.0,0.10649183359875407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166598691658575,0.0,0.0,0.2732435221625774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22016945748572486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19916034758341467,0.0,0.0,0.18038156288378407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17328746587186672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20541090745172472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20736657993329127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305775787051055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17406818838540292,0.0,0.16209238366195802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126372894352039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638294044344943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13541441407267,0.0,0.0,0.16181684089565032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27677196699269624,0.0,0.1991105560621979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681796302473932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22104301265888174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KristinBeale,2020/02/01,"Please help! I need advice from people with OCD Hello! I'm an author and I'm writing a book where the main character has OCD. I want to make sure to represent this disorder truthfully, instead of portray a generalized perception from the media. Is there someone (or many people, hopefully) willing to share their story with me? I've done lots of research, but real life always differs from textbook.

Please, reach out! Thank you!",3.3397402597402603,6.472393948051952,4.1168961038961065,79.26105844155849,83.54545454545455,6.716363636363638,27.180519480519482,7.908726449838941,2.447375064935065,342,15,53,7,10,109,61,77,0.026000000000000002,0.746,0.228,0.9063,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,0,3,5,0,0,5,0,4,1,0,1,2,17,11,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,5,11,9,2,2,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,3,0,34,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151967275547299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18324093033850006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300833410668625,0.25239154177014983,0.0,0.0,0.2253618248426097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760902444765905,0.0,0.0,0.2187284467281208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555481099482113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18722342314950915,0.0,0.0,0.14699875969347956,0.2232688183531692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632905613875728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053460541603231,0.0,0.0,0.4834715150126303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506589127444491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18659194479263347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20755502570944392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20274926388868664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298916381253182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,boredmoonface,2020/02/01,"How to actually get proper mental health help in the UK (NHS) I’ve never received proper mental health help, it’s so hard to reach out and it makes it even more difficult when you have in the past and nothing has come of it. I’ve struggled with my mental health since a young teenager, I finally asked for help at 17 years old and was told to come back when you are 18. Because they couldn’t give me adult treatment yet and by the time I would get to the front of the waiting list for CAMHS I would be too old. I went back when I was 18 and they just gave me antidepressants and sent me on my way. When they weren’t working effectively I went back and they just put up the dosage. When they still weren’t working effectively I changed doctors and at my new surgery I asked for CBT. I waited a long time on the waiting list and finally got a couple of sessions to just be told they don’t deal with “people like me” as I was self harming at the time and was told I could no longer do the CBT without any alternatives given. At 21 I moved house and doctors again, I asked to do CBT at my new doctors and was given some sessions over the phone...I felt like all it did was put a tiny dent in my massive amount of problems as they could only do the sessions on one topic. After I finished, again I wasn’t offered anything more for any of my other issues. And here I am now still feeling like I haven’t gotten hardly anywhere in all this time. I don’t know how to get proper help and have been left feeling like going private is my only option but just not affordable for me right now. I’m left contemplating taking drastic measures, maybe if I pretend to attempt suicide or if I go outside and run around naked or something someone might finally take me seriously! Or probably not. I just don’t know how to get help anymore. I have asked before for a mental health evaluation so I can get a proper diagnosis and have been ignored. Is it really too much to ask? How can I be treated properly if they don’t even know what is wrong with me.",6.707328490718325,5.54502644794189,6.937142857142856,80.35517352703793,65.39225181598063,9.513155770782893,33.22598870056497,8.269060116576782,2.3397315577078293,1605,56,332,17,21,520,187,413,0.07,0.865,0.064,-0.8153,3,0,1,0,0,1,27.0,0,2,8,5,32,12,0,1,17,0,41,7,0,7,3,67,80,36,1,9,15,0,5,4,0,3,7,0,0,2,9,23,0,4,8,1,0,13,14,7,0,1,24,5,48,5,45,47,7,66,0,0,0,0,31,19,0,9,37,225,57,8,0.0,0.0,0.06879254675785944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587747138944652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991168663637093,0.0,0.0,0.05801103757134692,0.0627551270668781,0.3295146081871654,0.0,0.0,0.16261795528787334,0.0,0.04297284518616739,0.0,0.05998570032966919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07457392450980706,0.12144968726952075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256838110198956,0.07800091834032959,0.0,0.0,0.07267682253529703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164625869804956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312201811866712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128836139428171,0.10072269233757804,0.06768585737888519,0.2316701189311131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841525575741801,0.06762483021921659,0.08012739529757948,0.0,0.056380960053553836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262986046274167,0.0,0.0,0.29972979284711426,0.0,0.0,0.23625517444092775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134128720920603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357803248897457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11622594226078488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15318514743499315,0.0,0.0,0.13776037517782996,0.0,0.0,0.06238549008262222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04705568340951638,0.0,0.07082128653525516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841678478625492,0.0747836153486422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492458839778482,0.051821631761431286,0.0,0.05436977040913595,0.13616822045738886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764145630818626,0.0,0.14794441862687124,0.0,0.047768955740713735,0.10722861819118472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729505875842573,0.048872069685736735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600508653176984,0.06745379809247111,0.0,0.14173305889411753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045160636769560336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060201991082725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354122726945349,0.0,0.0,0.05831384983056515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597298337702749,0.05427017618953133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259413453558755,0.0,0.0,0.07369624707582635,0.0,0.07710963511223208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060063106985884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442383948980652,0.0,0.0,0.20208179308400376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05595532094159002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069837455156544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679542650895569,0.0,0.10264179607283347,0.0,0.0,0.1001546623033958,0.07707476312812975,0.0,0.04539620198840585
mentalhealth,candlerrr,2020/02/01,Is my doctor hiding a diagnosis? I have been seeing my psych for a while now and she has never told me a diagnosis. I am on antipsychotics for hallucinations and delusions and feel I know what my diagnosis would be but she’s just never told me anything. Do I need some sort of special screening or is she just hiding it for my sanity? I’m in the dark I don’t know what’s going on.,0.9045850914205359,3.231469810126584,3.815611814345997,83.34074542897329,85.07594936708861,6.549085794655415,20.17018284106892,7.793537801064563,0.9735305203938114,301,9,62,6,9,107,50,79,0.066,0.89,0.043,-0.1654,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,0,2,16,19,6,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,3,14,1,7,14,1,8,0,0,2,0,5,3,0,3,4,50,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455350177277568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053967391767744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508660231873981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695718801846398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32795527642280325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22123931384379755,0.460246294503617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23776412930724974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5702151260015316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119551538268652,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garden-goddess,2020/02/01,"Obsessing over my loved one’s deaths (they’re all alive) Hi. I’m (24F) noticing recently that I’ve been really fixating on when my loved ones will die and how horrifying that will be. 

For some backstory, I do have anxiety, depression, and OCD. Also in 2015 five members of my friends and family passed unexpectedly, and that was the first time I had ever experienced the death of people I loved. I went to grief counseling during this time and was feeling a lot better after about a year. 

Recently I’ve been falling asleep in bed next to my partner and suddenly waking in a panic realizing his mortality. I start picturing the police calling me, having to attend the funeral, and I get to the point of shaking and sweating. This was happening for awhile and recently I’ve started to panic over the realization that children naturally outlive their parents, and I can do nothing to keep my family safe forever. Again, I can’t keep the image of the moments I find out they’ve passed out of my head. 

This has really been consuming my life and I don’t know why it’s happening. I haven’t told anyone because I don’t want to scare them. If anyone has advice or has experienced this I’d love to discuss. 

tl:dr; I’ve been panicking over my loved ones deaths, though they are all alive and well.",4.328684210526316,6.251266352226723,5.7560546558704475,75.79124797570853,71.71255060728745,9.636356275303644,29.354048582995947,10.008157457239328,3.2047782995951417,1027,42,186,29,20,346,140,247,0.153,0.7120000000000001,0.135,-0.5859,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,3,2,8,16,0,5,11,0,24,10,4,1,3,30,42,18,7,2,2,1,1,0,2,2,1,0,1,2,9,14,0,3,4,0,0,6,4,7,1,5,10,3,25,9,26,29,4,32,0,2,0,5,17,10,0,4,16,125,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092960489582734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944437787012273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556300508150308,0.0,0.0,0.15641269712976802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818117692898225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891999417864687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420876772395905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963340582717801,0.0,0.11608001090615865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117243606776752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21087967288868206,0.0,0.056553439272451426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222655731549182,0.09513739714372846,0.0,0.0,0.08641307451077679,0.0,0.058435684467694274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19781268898295207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478776775048695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19883033309889,0.0,0.0,0.06146844205676081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900117271041154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950887155915514,0.5047335228241291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895104859953587,0.0,0.0,0.10732065983303787,0.12733908096138855,0.0,0.0,0.2273722120767589,0.0,0.0,0.26245780411273484,0.12419337434804326,0.0,0.0,0.07754094977172607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057320073340963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330470102556922,0.0,0.3313076368487523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197882506278242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583324237242061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988956711953407,0.0,0.1304383133468398,0.0,0.0,0.10687504654545213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597053310768655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056430395907352,0.1036837212084238,0.10092494098780637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202610081474484
mentalhealth,Philfell2802,2020/02/01,"Help i dont know what to do A few months ago i started talking to my best friend about my depression. Since then it became kind of a habit to call her whenever i was having a panic attack. 
It felt pretty good to have someone with whom i could talk about my thoughts. But 2 weeks ago, when i had another panic attack, she texted me that she didn‘t wanna talk about that topic with me anymore because she doesn’t know how she could help me. I told her that she‘s already helping me by listening to me but we are still not talking about it. Since then my self-hatred and depression has become much worse. We are still best friends but im feeling like she doesn‘t want to be that anymore. Now im scared im going to lose my best friend because i confronted her with how im feeling. Can anyone give me an advice on how to get this friendship back on track or how i can handle this situation?",4.412833333333335,5.125463727777782,5.010000000000002,85.86000000000001,70.05555555555556,7.555555555555558,27.777777777777786,7.492282038375204,1.4449444444444448,701,23,143,7,12,225,103,180,0.14,0.639,0.222,0.9461,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,2,0,0,4,13,18,3,3,4,0,17,0,0,4,0,25,30,12,0,4,5,0,3,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,11,6,0,0,6,0,0,1,5,9,0,0,6,4,30,9,20,21,5,15,0,3,0,0,26,2,0,1,13,104,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527801101654944,0.17285961588405868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075960905290102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223954693995,0.0,0.0,0.1933919444950032,0.0681757978549972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22184563259112428,0.0,0.07497316518409351,0.0,0.11887285932981816,0.10768350781489093,0.0,0.0,0.3069675970493385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995606367577316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556951287929791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16795698568740974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11427183979775955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860007312947808,0.06965558357664635,0.09361739219222448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259898489566158,0.0,0.05094086969784399,0.09353298455136247,0.055412741164854916,0.08178021049391594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960609868552398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42127638397078093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153352620062664,0.10716930676405499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04763464470642162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908000982475527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782531733988615,0.0,0.07167532794176233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287956224399236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919477927172182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761670096624682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171604796321387,0.0,0.0,0.16130963723389313,0.10959654604741298,0.0,0.0,0.08261328865714512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901255148587851,0.0,0.15573074877899692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134742660331318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740584726938646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316752031941597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05750931749235937,0.0,0.07821037508116181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936306082574473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kaluwa_cutie,2020/02/01,"Help please. So here is the problem
When I start studying suddenly some topic from earlier instances comes to mind and I think about it for long time.

And I can't stop thinking.
I think it has to do sumthin' with my brain

What are your opinions and solutions",2.141866666666669,4.8737085200000045,2.291999999999998,93.47266666666668,83.8,5.7333333333333325,26.333333333333336,7.1686216300943375,1.3325333333333331,206,9,41,3,6,62,42,50,0.053,0.78,0.16699999999999998,0.5978,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,5,1,1,0,0,13,10,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,6,10,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,6,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3278245390608519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25296429437043777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19683582506453268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598821262121929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965154736787199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32235330769513776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809954116917713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078558727478179,0.0,0.0,0.24551505104269736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5645013361699663,0.0,0.0,0.17123700138442172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IceSteve08,2020/02/01,I need someone to talk to... Lately I’ve been feeling stressed and  it just came..I might not pass this grade and I yell for no reason...I want to leave my school but can’t becuse parents... I might go into more detail,-0.30533333333333346,1.944342355555559,1.2327777777777804,99.5825,92.11111111111113,3.0,16.38888888888889,3.1291,-1.1567777777777777,166,4,37,0,6,53,36,45,0.111,0.8290000000000001,0.06,-0.25,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,11,8,3,0,2,3,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,5,5,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,1,22,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889274709291064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277311525946003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14356852024072406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849638874551287,0.2674857805117904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5359751407858576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873129016027995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805021773064059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597331771200582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556627054227347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21404224651944576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893728422815165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030446227792277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14900052657327584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zh00404394,2020/02/01,"I don’t care about anything. I can enjoy things. I like playing the game, hanging w friends, because it’s fun. Of course it’s fun. But I don’t honestly care about them. I don’t want to lose them or want them to die or something like that but if they left or died I would be more upset about having to make new friends that were funny and everything, I would have lost a whole schools life in grooming and molding them to be like me. Have my humor, be callous.. they act how I want them to act because of how I made them. And if I lost them I wouldn’t have the chance to do it again. We’re young adults now and so molding someone is going to be extremely more of a pain in be neck. I’m indifferent to them but enjoy them and want them to be around..I’m indifferent to my family. Don’t get me wrong they’re good people and I grew up being loved. But I never felt the same way about them. They’re just a group of people I was born into and idk but I don’t feel that unconditional love towards them. My job is nice I make good money but I don’t care about it nor am I motivated by money. I’m not motivated to go really I just do it because that’s what we’re supposed to do..I’m just moving. Not that life is meaningless I just don’t think it’s meaningful. I don’t like talking about it with people in fear of being alienated. I do have emotions..I know so because sometimes I cry and I’m sad. Sometimes I get angry. Sometimes I’m enjoying myself. But there’s always that indifference to everything still there. I almost got hit by a car on a highway while riding my bike.. I remember looking at it..had to be going at least 40 and I remember saying in my head “what do you want to do?” And I let it get closer and then at the last second the car swerved out of the way, jumped the divider and braked. I was alive. While I’m typing this I realize how it sounds. Never looked at the words like that or even thought back to it. I don’t want to die. But when put in that scenario it feels like I chose to die. I wasn’t scared or anything and it felt cold and warm at the same time. It felt like nothing And I remember seeing my friends faces. I turned around to look at them and they were horrified. And to calm them down I smiled. I have suicidal thoughts but I doubt I’ll ever act on them. It’s just how everyone thinks about it but really would never do it. I usually think about everything I do. My facial expression, my micro expressions. I’m prone to some slip ups here and there but I’m aware of myself 90% of the time. I try using it to my advantage and it had its perks ya know.. making people feel deeper bonds, or building trust.. making people feel that you are authentic and real. But it feels like every thing I do or say is a lie. And honestly it is (isn’t that a paradox?) everything I said to them about my past or what I’m doing is a lie..it’s easier to lie than to tell the truth. Not lying for any gain but just to keep their mind at ease that I’m ok. I hate when people worry😭gets in the way of everything. I’m talking to you as if you were a therapist and I was in a chair😂. I’m trying to be professional sounding while not overbearing. And I know not everybody wants to sit there and read all this so I’ll stop now😂",0.6519736842105246,2.721565600877195,2.69248538011696,92.67934210526316,83.78070175438596,6.022222222222222,19.880116959064328,7.2793139503082624,0.4144818713450293,2517,71,569,38,72,845,264,684,0.134,0.674,0.192,0.9861,3,0,1,0,0,1,73.0,0,5,20,7,36,45,1,4,22,1,57,9,4,12,6,124,120,63,5,14,35,0,9,8,3,4,3,5,0,1,39,28,0,3,23,4,2,14,21,11,0,1,18,19,85,34,76,86,8,66,0,4,4,2,41,25,0,14,31,375,124,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616966235156188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051267038129577294,0.0,0.0,0.0418990234242475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014046693907411,0.10969745033372566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04737667371398658,0.0,0.15023510494958475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18845599703257196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767910145542219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557786973844777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040694874008710094,0.05573257985293442,0.05191169734858474,0.058873961104294735,0.2768694245416444,0.0,0.058083350887967324,0.06933187129853498,0.15576718287670688,0.08803282740871245,0.1774747257750697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280639359964287,0.0,0.12876121510705515,0.0,0.1050484403847168,0.10335629659806372,0.04927762761639623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060830184255781586,0.06323281993535246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06114149851745635,0.054764557656775785,0.0,0.0,0.1015828516692794,0.05022290303264043,0.0,0.0,0.06694281761515107,0.06300357310647224,0.08703831473642264,0.24080840276079124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552184687425222,0.0689293031913011,0.13451596224073445,0.0,0.11121646352928186,0.05829980860941844,0.1645089010252157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221167097123026,0.0,0.0,0.06548497866781319,0.0,0.0,0.14255947205929936,0.05950631963798569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591194348627527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655606865477381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058816679296900015,0.2562886103956473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06193818702699477,0.0,0.0,0.0616297772351772,0.07012920101120054,0.07894186404544745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093869077302468,0.0,0.05860817102420536,0.09799442630761912,0.06168546545097544,0.062355750467126485,0.0490976666963897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05220458295362652,0.04743277749090705,0.18281080546451728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0492043043268946,0.05151131367431655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673947354051353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904455803030453,0.053852568476095514,0.0,0.0,0.07153756240434855,0.08186601690371728,0.11843756736512655,0.0,0.09782784441957773,0.07185419267373823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836625062533581,0.06701736434526738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05321393942722033,0.067858129261709,0.0,0.2543870349559872,0.14671684195674534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878883012248119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13130454363524707,0.06736425687754004,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stardustkiddo,2020/02/01,18+ mental health support group chat on telegram reply to this if interested for the link.,7.572352941176473,8.05341329411765,7.698823529411764,70.14470588235297,63.11764705882353,9.15294117647059,34.64705882352941,8.841846274778883,3.0862235294117646,74,3,12,1,1,24,17,17,0.0,0.722,0.278,0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5736729580537497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5438879075668972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6124420635459022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OldPickleInTheFridge,2020/02/01,"Saw some comments about PTSD and I’ve got questions. I saw a meme in r/trollcoping about hearing what sounds like an argument, and your heart picks up and you feel the urge to run. 

Here’s my question: will repressed childhood memories cause a reaction like this? It’s been a couple of months since I found out my biological father hit me when I was little. He abused my older brothers the same way, and yelling was a part of our household for a long time. That’s my only solid memory of him, is yelling and irritation.

Throughout my entire life, yelling and verbal fights have made my heart pound and my head spin. I can’t remember much about those moments, either. I’m almost 28 now, but if I hear a loud noise or what I think is yelling, I freeze and feel my adrenaline spike. And I still have little to no memory of when my bio father lived with us. I know you guys can’t diagnose, but is this indicative of PTSD I may not have realized I carry? 

I don’t need a solid yes or no, just an idea. I’m going to get a referral to a specialist this year, as my husband’s insurance covers it now. (Yay!)",3.037395676219205,4.670240434389144,4.308740573152337,86.03911890397184,74.52036199095022,7.807038712921066,25.399949723479143,8.515128840125781,1.6469394670688795,860,29,178,16,18,283,137,221,0.073,0.87,0.057,-0.5069,0,0,0,0,7,0,28.0,2,3,0,0,10,5,1,1,13,2,14,5,3,3,0,38,31,17,0,2,8,4,3,2,0,2,2,8,0,1,9,11,0,1,10,0,0,2,6,2,0,0,8,13,29,3,18,20,5,20,0,0,2,0,18,5,0,8,14,112,38,1,0.0,0.16554342151426835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990776526238308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352925317002038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15459571890157764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14181120448531512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412916118625519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15319398108296736,0.0,0.0,0.07299708165365232,0.0,0.07940516947308449,0.0,0.11174554399231523,0.0,0.0,0.13834315277513204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433913563544402,0.0,0.31494551478790245,0.3311338822978492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772503313364494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678556219223855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868721668288773,0.13651867625356012,0.2800690241138233,0.12337388045519287,0.1236463607552633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220489992784604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115218699303345,0.0,0.1027090781400337,0.10359940097819934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626211632381496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130137923705908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3266465953674361,0.0,0.3130331008667032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158273676723565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557647946067462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115792707509074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952588990532008,0.0,0.0,0.08147090512311794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680639960217604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090193873859792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997404942308497
mentalhealth,lemonadecoldpressed,2020/02/01,"Help please I am so angry at my mom all the time. She left me with 3 dogs, one is mine, 2 are hers, they were never properly trained, they pee everywhere etc. She left me with a house that she didn’t take care of for 30 years. She had a maid but she couldn’t actually clean the house she had to pick up my mothers mess all the time. She is so toxic. But in exchange for fixing her mess and taking care of her stupid dogs 24/7 she pays for my food and bills. Am I actually the spoiled bitch here ? I so want to never talk to her again. And keep her from seing her dogs. They’re untrained annoying and irritating as hell but I love them so much. But at the same time she is my mom and even though I hate her, well I love her. I hate this toxic relationship",1.1103773584905667,2.9304166415094386,2.49620125786164,96.04581132075474,80.69811320754717,6.001006289308176,18.147169811320754,7.0316486544052195,-0.17173660377358502,582,12,141,7,15,188,91,159,0.215,0.636,0.149,-0.9521,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,3,0,9,13,6,0,7,0,11,4,1,1,4,20,21,15,0,2,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,7,1,1,0,0,3,0,4,8,1,1,4,0,34,5,16,16,5,13,1,0,0,2,28,6,2,0,7,96,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.2780207250610571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904739340968252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886907488825114,0.09408668604619894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17225074756881026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28127918258113643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548103391010013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3287356656078366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661584212324106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3095440404929916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25713283901575473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33367074344807146,0.0,0.0,0.1047169229456838,0.0,0.21973198700954052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652760608783156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15636699819751615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15293767183019832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21420889871403195,0.11449567621203666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995611096701324,0.0,0.24919070393546786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840205261899802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280793914576685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173293900761753
mentalhealth,AngeltheBuffySlayer,2020/02/01,"Is it normal to feel a bit crap from being unfriended on social media? Even if you haven’t seen nor spoken to the person in a few years? Don’t know whether this is the right subreddit to ask this. But I recently discovered I had been unfriended on social media from someone who I haven’t seen in awhile. Even though I didn’t have much of a real connection to this person anymore, it still instigated these thoughts and feelings of self-doubt and confusion. Maybe I’m just being petty, but has anybody else here had a similar experience in this regard?? And are there any good methods for dealing with these kind of thoughts and feelings?? Thanks in advance :)",6.337500000000002,7.279705975806454,6.3469354838709675,77.16540322580649,65.85483870967742,9.425806451612903,32.435483870967744,9.516144504307137,3.021116129032257,527,21,93,10,8,167,81,124,0.039,0.857,0.10300000000000001,0.897,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,7,5,1,1,6,0,14,1,1,0,0,19,25,10,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,9,5,0,0,6,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,8,5,5,3,17,15,3,11,0,0,2,0,8,7,1,2,3,69,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970373333312301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745705174054093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456057180559588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19217482918964704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814751027157668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14704715689762138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325270590218373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218722940245373,0.0,0.0,0.2670121420109448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764227844883224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18330401764275175,0.09673929997773767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17684180183037296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293993823441713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17246813084288853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30739827114797397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003561536914389,0.0,0.0,0.173804463958004,0.0,0.0,0.1503252637403783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18363353414475303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35887273044521045,0.14914627993528326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057461111563374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16206111417200095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17294467603691446,0.27949000343951796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133549889959836
mentalhealth,amsterdamamman,2020/02/01,"panic attacks, weed and mental health? never thought id be typing this and it sucks. but 3 days ago i smoked a joint and had a full-blown panic attack. i went completely crazy as i had no idea what a panic attack was and had no idea they could get this bad. i’ve always been stressed and also smoked, so not sure whats changing right now.

i suddenly started feeling uncomfortable so i went to bed (thank god i was alone) and started shaking, hyperventilating and sweating. i genuinely thought i was going to die and started thinking about what everyone’s going to do after my death and even was going to call or text some people that im dying etc and then call the ambulance until i googled some things and a friend that i reached out to told me its probably a panic attack. when i was sure it was a panic attack and not infact a heart attack, i calmed down a bit but it lasted for maybe a couple hours. i had another one later on (didnt smoke) and 2 more the day after which lead me to flushing my weed down the toilet during one. 
now i live in a constant state of anxiety about when the next one is going to be and im genuinely scared of smoking weed because of how terrifying the experience was. 

im used to stress so not sure why this happened.

i guess im just venting but does anybody know anything about this or experienced something similar? i already booked an appointment with a psychiatrist and psychologist soon but its honestly shit as i have PTSD and ADHD and weed is the only thing thats ever helped me :(",6.327729411764707,6.159584486666668,6.986352941176474,76.40523529411767,65.8,9.592156862745098,31.98039215686275,9.168548406835145,2.6640215686274518,1206,43,229,19,17,399,167,300,0.314,0.635,0.05,-0.9984,0,1,4,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,1,16,25,8,9,18,0,20,4,3,3,5,48,41,34,3,1,10,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,18,19,0,0,7,1,0,8,7,18,0,3,18,2,23,7,26,20,5,38,0,0,0,0,6,6,2,5,23,155,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632511140630628,0.0,0.06367252591476197,0.0,0.0,0.07439370883038374,0.07926564949826755,0.05744203251404599,0.05976790575280608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531950327153117,0.054949377891898986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05910956575764877,0.0,0.0,0.4902986178001034,0.0,0.0,0.05997463981764153,0.04378660207897477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841922030941093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466919197205386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598609642513293,0.0,0.07531187372765431,0.07762218148792928,0.0,0.05735001823400095,0.07947798565271645,0.0,0.09264818218634066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909538015646834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628584875055819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010888997281146,0.047442713351752534,0.06497390334100793,0.0,0.06863617417651804,0.0,0.07026304294852745,0.0,0.0,0.03631915806028987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05549530058663158,0.0,0.03752795387595915,0.0,0.16328946144106773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791283024565436,0.0,0.06351859771862264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763514093246186,0.0,0.08511831418550421,0.04814580588056378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073759755760596,0.0,0.0,0.16217354541946674,0.3103527835402357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03947561972356936,0.05855063691216837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342677255493981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216239648098667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238725073992366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05539934560340377,0.0,0.07639149786648328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14602060308215795,0.05462957846839357,0.0,0.4213822622619171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04979753746428943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744435970034183,0.0,0.08396485234060652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613420083422772,0.0,0.0,0.071913869415929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07373195892222521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0552978654141284,0.0,0.0,0.15252388883737014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456092008398612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030953869128588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613096142419983,0.0,0.0,0.09544066833531636,0.046025449113320106,0.0,0.11404921365832195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863617417651804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062037633388981175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331733492177598,0.06481495964025527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RyanLeforge,2020/02/01,"Just sad? I just recently got out of a not so serious relationship that lasted 3 months, ever since then i sit up at night thinking of everything we did together and how much fun it was. I get that this might be normal but im not usually a person who gets longterm hurt by people leaving but this feels like more than a scar left by someone i dated, ive never really felt ""depressed"" about anything in life uptill now and ive been feeling this way for around 4 or 5 months.

Im really just asking if im going to be okay by leaving it alone or should i talk to her or get professional help?",3.2612204007286003,4.37923980327869,5.075355191256829,82.8187340619308,73.09836065573771,8.373041894353369,25.850637522768675,8.841846274778883,1.840505282331512,464,15,96,9,9,159,88,122,0.076,0.8029999999999999,0.122,0.5475,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,0,9,7,0,0,3,1,9,1,0,1,2,26,19,11,0,3,11,0,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,8,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,5,3,9,3,15,10,2,20,0,3,0,0,8,6,0,5,12,63,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15141800193398675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030926381981022,0.13014804517242234,0.13667626571965352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592092563221455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224530375516513,0.0,0.0,0.13139417283623095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14784514529184756,0.10444454600712548,0.14037390147092446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291487229998574,0.0,0.08308822203183777,0.0,0.11692864119443985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799406216670747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650898012617026,0.0,0.4737598022447378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917164223410767,0.0,0.3096071183886012,0.15884556704719194,0.0,0.10326462906462633,0.07142541322761918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550939628913468,0.0,0.0,0.23338918490233204,0.0,0.10747303665257192,0.0,0.1127576289931091,0.0,0.0,0.13719779359838766,0.14324391207817272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135593106760103,0.12765526799097426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18731755854900514,0.0,0.1443538074676179,0.1569629392060303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12093726706725005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387388038256328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750916337066047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367837216911297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16101746842066336,0.0,0.0,0.1160459069707965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamacat-meow,2020/02/01,"Please help! Okay so maybe I’m an idiot idk, sure seems that way lately tbh. But I wanted to just ask if anyone in the group has any personal experience/knowledge about what steps a new mental health provider opening a new facility would have to take to secure an insurance policy/set up network coverage through third party insurance? More specifically, the specific processes and individual requirements that the new provider would have to take in order to submit claims billing the third party insurance company for the reimbursement of the services that they have provided to clients so far at their new mental health facility?

I’m desperate 🥴😭",8.857623261694059,10.100520097345132,8.562351453855882,62.42699115044253,60.41592920353982,12.828824273072062,39.15170670037927,12.28987398476788,5.575590139064476,533,26,80,18,7,171,79,113,0.059000000000000004,0.794,0.14800000000000002,0.8642,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,1,4,4,1,0,10,1,6,2,0,0,1,11,13,5,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,4,2,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,3,3,14,11,1,14,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,5,46,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178963921205172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494407849300067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15368081210534915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3494740205170875,0.0,0.0,0.11018597103151707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854370931415687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16515008073483595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3313293595237249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6350687399857383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435374690044512,0.0,0.18044892088096925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965287823171947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15493396921931402,0.0,0.24719899378782034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696044214957616,0.13048373198426755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335533760339427,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PsychologicalGarlic5,2020/02/01,"All I want to do is sleep I'm afraid to talk to people because I know at some point I won't be able to hold back the tears when someone asks how I am.

I haven't felt like this in nearly 10 years.  I lost my job then because I was so depressed I couldn't focus on work.  I wish I could stop working again and focus on what I actually care about, but that's impossible.

I'm starting therapy this month...again...which just means time and money is going to go to something I don't care about, but know I need.  Maybe?  Talk won't help anything, only change will.

All I want to do is sleep.",1.245498181818185,2.8100177680000016,2.813018181818183,95.1345090909091,79.32,5.505454545454546,20.163636363636364,6.1124844417494595,-0.16835999999999984,451,11,107,3,11,148,79,125,0.10400000000000001,0.799,0.096,0.0226,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,8,6,0,1,1,0,15,2,2,1,2,21,32,8,0,6,3,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,4,0,1,2,5,3,0,0,3,1,15,3,14,23,3,16,0,2,0,0,4,6,0,1,9,63,19,3,0.1583986945114461,0.0,0.15457427655678987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303486291394676,0.0,0.1480813971161955,0.0,0.0,0.1217988187113968,0.0,0.19311674794129813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32299605154803346,0.0,0.16756481587574193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646846854831048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642856347882776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208758696336405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18004325678040456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617130602984216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15718626298309124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17410356003951372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738560111118499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729108864592096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15913277886833713,0.1725426144914571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264323267473415,0.0,0.0,0.11745062491766688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046934489449596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981371051861374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973796529601027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31702617630853097,0.0,0.134210699836356,0.1219430536949546,0.0,0.0,0.11211541124880793,0.0,0.0,0.13242840123560118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25462974122478504,0.0,0.0,0.1811427117569485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236355257818274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186855307983026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18215068147421834,0.0,0.0,0.2306322722473587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102003565960175
mentalhealth,ganton177,2020/02/01,"The human walk Tonight I find myself angry and bitter about my circumstances. I may have adequate material possessions and financially I have what I need, and more. But the reason I'm bitter is because I'm alone, in my house most weekends with no female company or affection. My anger and resentment is because I am hated and not loved by the world particularly females. The hatred is not confined to me only, hatred for one another is evident. People don't talk any more, they like you or dislike you based on your tribe. Are you a vegan or meat eater, gay or straight, male or female or neither, what culture do you celebrate, what music, movies, sports team, clothing label, followers you have or people you follow. Your education level, your proffession, your income, where you live, what you own, where you go. This complex modern tribalism segregates us, like the tribes of our ancestors. Segregation and division, and that leads to loss of love. And all the evidence suggests that we are an unhappy generation. And I say, that this unhappiness comes from the love dying in the world. The most disturbing thing about all this, is that it's not allowed to be discusses according to unwritten social laws created by us. So instead to have this conversation, I go to the only platform I have, to write. Can anybody correct me?",6.1188422035480885,8.09966372268908,6.770868347338936,70.06906629318397,67.23529411764707,10.330905695611575,33.390289449112984,10.504223727775694,4.08239421101774,1058,48,168,30,18,347,145,238,0.185,0.718,0.096,-0.9768,3,1,0,0,0,0,38.0,4,13,1,3,6,12,5,1,12,0,18,4,0,4,3,39,30,18,1,1,11,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,2,14,12,0,1,3,3,0,7,6,7,0,1,0,3,32,5,19,28,8,20,0,1,0,4,32,10,0,10,5,129,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17687266737124316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613369027326745,0.1790737638727842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082072053293956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471085976793525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723876115068568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608637726563185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19411213026456686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860616788358015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19705283667342569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686527617990804,0.0,0.1507985368778864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4623966362419962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662840814682638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115722390886502,0.2597660316439304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23678946562295894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558640371379056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13580810987028352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740848566897347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726346207495926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345613661129306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4108455470221963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AGayDragon69,2020/02/01,"I need help, why do i keep hitting my head? So like for context when I'm stressed or trying not to cry i hit the side of my head to 'help'. Its become a habit.

So i was just scratching the side of my head when i started hitting it uncontrollably. I tried to stop it but it didn't stop. I thought nothing of it at first, but just putting my hand near my head can trigger it.

Any ideas of what's happening or how to stop it??",0.3952258852258837,2.207835604395605,1.9687179487179485,98.9568376068376,83.06593406593407,4.923565323565324,23.2979242979243,5.82211442006289,0.07645689865689898,324,12,80,2,9,105,55,91,0.122,0.772,0.107,0.1812,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,2,3,0,4,5,5,2,0,16,13,9,0,1,7,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,3,2,12,1,11,7,0,12,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,8,51,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858675859877616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17635220039613544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17539917762543886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582232918591444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120304405429354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6555042473726406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214058074106052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802574293260272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192946078556185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801077973338387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839947869418435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321569042162214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16052085258994134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302116318877264,0.0,0.0,0.4004947699918359,0.18291101884182184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12676677948631812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21682224614916926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14408488112414647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vauxlez_,2020/02/01,"Close friend feeling really depressed So tonight me, a friend we'll call Cody, and a ton of our friends decided to hang out, get drunk, and just hang out and have a good time. We were all doing shots and goofing around, until the conversation turned towards mental health.

Cody I've known for a while has suffered with anxiety, depression, weight issues, and OCD. (Which makes him latch onto certain ideas or thoughts for days or months on end) I mentioned how he hasn't seemed to want to hang out as much, and I wanted to make sure he's OK. 

He ended up telling us that his OCD has made his depression really bad as of late, so he hasn't wanted to hang out, even to play DnD. (One of his favorite things to do, almost ever)

Well he went on a drunken spiel about how he's been crushing on this girl in our friend group. (Who'll we'll name Claire) He thinks that she'd never ""go for a guy like him"" because she currently has a crush on me. I told him that I see Claire as a friend, but not anything more. We all opened up about our own individual experiences with depression, and how we each individually get through it.

But after many hours of talking later, Cody hadn't seemed to change his mind. He still thinks he should die and that he's worthless. Worrying about him, we made the plan that since I'm closest that I'd walk with him back to his dorm, before I walk back to my house.

The reasoning behind this was that Cody has prescription xanax in his room, and was honestly too scared to be left in the same room as them. So I told him that I will hold onto them until he feels safe to have them in his possession again.

We all want Cody to live his life to the fullest, and be as happy as possible while doing that. At this point I feel like I've said everything I can to him, but it doesn't feel like enough.

Are there any ideas on how we can show him that we care without being overbearing on him? I want him to feel like he truly is loved by us, but not so much that we feel pushy about it.",5.184611111111111,5.137745118518517,5.2386574074074135,87.56020833333334,68.18518518518519,8.725308641975309,26.75154320987655,8.344100000000001,1.3732654320987647,1563,40,348,20,24,489,204,405,0.10300000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.141,0.9486,1,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,15,0,3,1,23,28,0,1,13,1,30,6,0,9,7,82,62,34,1,6,10,0,7,4,5,5,3,1,3,2,20,29,2,2,16,3,0,8,8,8,1,1,12,9,51,20,64,41,11,57,0,6,1,1,69,28,0,5,25,225,71,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570603823733748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058204146338682136,0.0,0.0654761284782662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043329097294324,0.07619326096881643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162687931733796,0.07146408881758362,0.052174879740946783,0.0,0.07283080017900237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739697655213585,0.0,0.08726472626518078,0.0,0.0905428887999734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055198480063274574,0.0,0.29487422374787176,0.0,0.08882892437695887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15161470060399815,0.08843736686819456,0.0,0.05653139878831756,0.0774210701940899,0.0,0.0,0.076922788102038,0.0837234597345635,0.0,0.0,0.259661304707355,0.18343657502072214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33063317279939425,0.0,0.08943450221921452,0.0,0.048642778893218684,0.07178884518745772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474757294123708,0.0,0.0911121642793941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097818534488694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428892561872882,0.09875938769537737,0.0,0.19324142152347085,0.0,0.08933374041343305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654926683642172,0.0,0.09299380353913203,0.0,0.060454759967737866,0.16725983529442046,0.0,0.07557755279666709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724833169718782,0.16197468649620178,0.11426400148202735,0.08677484301361983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625460581118717,0.0,0.0864215178601973,0.0,0.06831713472531968,0.0,0.1258370207240843,0.0,0.0660122973089219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057998010378996566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809102308863257,0.09648988365305636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966231266599252,0.08800079212838784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141570576466542,0.0,0.08569053798042735,0.0,0.06820416190489839,0.15583587327053353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708009462478116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683522978695072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066757779017543,0.0,0.0,0.06879401330282288,0.07480944709758132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05686220392038367,0.1096852534105916,0.0,0.06794891273408236,0.04990822701382847,0.0,0.0,0.16356985760528114,0.0,0.0,0.09309736033912767,0.0,0.0,0.20590850325351528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524160469483313,0.0,0.0,0.10422558221278358,0.07695570392928094,0.07934280293779783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250572177783841,0.0,0.0,0.08692081656121156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Gupp,2020/02/01,"Ive never been able to love myself (21m) As long as I can remember I’ve never been able to truly love myself. I can have self confidence but things will always get interrupted with myself critiquing myself and how I live life. I try to better myself (and have) but no matter what I accomplish I have that little voice in my head that just reminds me who the fuck I was and what I’ve done. I have a group of friends who I’m proud to call my brothers, but I’m not one to put my burdens on someone else fearing that they may be dealing with their own demons. They know I have my depression issues and that It. Is there any things that can help me?",2.4464314789687904,3.9734088805970167,3.6907598371777515,90.2988127544098,75.86567164179105,6.365264586160108,21.883310719131615,6.980632752743323,0.4821731343283582,506,13,109,5,11,165,82,134,0.152,0.6559999999999999,0.192,0.4854,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,3,3,3,9,1,1,2,0,17,5,1,1,2,18,24,10,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,12,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,4,1,24,5,12,17,1,7,1,1,0,3,14,3,1,1,3,82,36,1,0.35408562875076965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731380416447715,0.0,0.0,0.12039518483205434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15657998208332338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807805080505775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825233676971299,0.15248671659814175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18117626705826714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789655377288427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19922238700457826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678283921273274,0.16367322906013945,0.09249756333844812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18169700440232872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866806657346053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18478670104067985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729810071112023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250505755713843,0.0,0.17744341082031154,0.15633204866818606,0.15667731950974964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31957610437350675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730926655791968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996879292481005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779769280007107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20055499625325798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18469426699662736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000780209461553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352387581158557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020044956533325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stalesceneries,2020/02/01,"Why was there a bowl in my hand??? Why was there a bowl in my hand after I don’t remember picking it up?  I know this sounds really weird but one time when I was walking back upstairs to my room I looked down and there was a bowl in my hand, I don’t remeber picking it up or even feeling bowl in my hand during that walk? Wtf does this say about my brain??? This has happened about 3 times where I have something in my hand with no memory of picking it up..",2.5419734904270967,3.3406057010309307,3.8039764359351977,92.47103092783506,74.4639175257732,7.192341678939616,24.166421207658324,7.447530270364453,0.7789245949926369,351,10,83,4,7,115,56,97,0.09,0.722,0.188,0.8837,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,0,3,0,8,6,6,3,0,10,12,4,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,7,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,4,9,13,0,15,8,0,18,0,0,1,0,1,11,0,1,5,58,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126181590509777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086752092736753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24197466839908635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826314199848317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398111309533535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24451577233343094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15196197636175848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321977074905523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187369483487822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17713858413450073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132305088909815,0.0,0.0,0.21989085435341185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128699429106182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3224689487196782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4990122730795333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MetalNurse5,2020/02/01,"31 long years Today is the 31st anniversary of my mother's death. She committed suicide when I was 6 and I don't know that I've ever completely recovered. I think there was this idea that because I and my 2 younger brothers were so young that we would be fine. I know I haven't. I've struggled with depression since about age 10. At times damn near debilitating. There have been many milestones in my life that I've been so saddened and feel such a tremendous loss that she wasn't here to see. My wedding day, the day of my first child's birth, the day I graduated college (I'm the only one who even took a college course and I did it with 5 children), the day I did a reading of a piece of writting that was published in a book, my divorce and the hell I endured that I could have used her support....I don't think my brothers have been okay either but I'll leave that for a different post. The last 3 1/2 yrs have been increadibly difficult after escaping my abusive marriage and having feelings again. You make yourself numb to deal,  the day I finally admitted to myself that I was being abused and the day I found my spine again and asked for a divorce were complete turning points for me. Feeling all that shit, questioning why me, wtf is wrong with me, I think I finally broke and the healing has been the messiest thing I've ever gone through. It has been hell. 
No I haven't been okay. I remember everything. Everything about that day and the days after. Her funeral. Everything. I miss my mom every single damn day since that evening my uncle loaded my brothers and I into his truck and took us to our grandparents where I saw my dad cry for the first time in my life while he told us that our mom was an angel now. 
I haven't fucking been okay! Some days are worse than others. Some yrs are worse than previous yrs. I was terrified to turn 25 as that's how old she was when she killed herself. It's terrifying to know that I've made it to 37. I've outlived my mother's yrs on this plain. It's hard to explain but when you look just like someone to the point that your face is not your own, nothing is yours. My face is now my own. I have little lines around my eyes that she didn't live long enough to earn. I've got a few grey hairs even that she never had the chance to cover up. Now finally as I enter my late 30s, my reflection is my own. 
It's been a long 31 yrs and I still miss her as much as that day. I still see her face even though I can't hear her voice anymore tell me that no matter what, she loves me. 
I know I wouldn't be the person I am today had she lived and I know in my heart that I am good. I'm just tired of the pain. 
I wish you had been stronger Mom.",2.841627070436676,4.140191974820148,3.778330266019744,91.0039794211143,74.39568345323741,7.0425966203781165,24.80073615526184,7.5712925761633665,0.9789492722101388,2102,66,468,26,43,675,256,556,0.201,0.736,0.063,-0.9981,2,1,0,0,3,1,52.0,5,6,0,4,30,24,7,1,27,3,56,16,8,4,5,60,93,28,4,4,6,9,5,1,0,2,6,2,0,3,33,20,0,0,18,2,0,4,13,17,0,3,34,13,88,7,44,53,12,65,3,5,6,2,53,14,6,3,47,311,121,7,0.0,0.16050203262507046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717166926862662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06029559352747711,0.06332001799771864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04128862974499351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14203084606265615,0.0,0.0,0.0540782695232088,0.0,0.07440011740011106,0.4804949391063709,0.0698284324368727,0.05833723386674796,0.0,0.0,0.0707652346879942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998497580392854,0.0,0.17894465728538075,0.12253444253542707,0.057066897965801985,0.0,0.182618716094812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027415829456148,0.0,0.0,0.22259037590102007,0.0,0.11522513815393133,0.0,0.0742643383978372,0.0,0.06261688660114753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056810155835192236,0.05417124638207069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067432004070913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633857453715041,0.08026241800139244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646087105800414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493511633203398,0.0,0.18611791841953096,0.05521039436766164,0.07640433385476662,0.0717181150851746,0.0,0.0,0.09568183819584172,0.033090298650272486,0.06788498031876501,0.11961670481840428,0.1798213306791113,0.05687758874239564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611305245301895,0.06408939409164145,0.04521145112166202,0.0686693363196676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379797264958732,0.0,0.0,0.049790609798111916,0.0,0.05223888039104562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499041505913239,0.0,0.07107304970220428,0.0,0.04589676849039969,0.051513027533818284,0.07207132883104805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05914072808567933,0.0,0.0,0.1280567423340196,0.0,0.06486826796222853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587503101671747,0.0,0.06775005227662523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672683877379552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794682812652097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952564044184238,0.11205676255452482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738886919371883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818128313724712,0.0,0.0,0.07080790312876033,0.0,0.07408751177930674,0.07686115672848423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05920051139505826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04499794720773489,0.1301992598461576,0.0665460740632566,0.0,0.07898982485956195,0.07784765197646275,0.12840350769235795,0.06472056401124357,0.15050487309796726,0.0,0.1473453301804864,0.0,0.0,0.16294584662948586,0.05849846194124377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061117345111558766,0.0,0.07788813891453204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380488246650378,0.048114672779577455,0.07405400651723168,0.0,0.043617009011345714
mentalhealth,buteo51,2020/02/01,"Conflicting issues with touch I don't get touched very often, maybe every few months or up to a year at family holiday get-togethers. I find myself craving touch almost every day, but being touched has usually been intensely uncomfortable for me. In the days leading up to those family get-togethers, I will think about how my relatives will want to hug me and how it will make me uncomfortable, kind of steel myself, and then wince through it. I remember one time I was out to eat with a couple of friends and a girl that I liked, who I guess was trying to be flirty, reached around my back to get something. I grimaced and ducked out of the way, making a nice awkward silence for the table. If I had to describe it, I would say it feels too loud if that makes sense? It's much worse if I'm not expecting it. I even feel off for a few minutes afterwards. Does anyone else experience this? I think I have other issues, but is this specifically a mental health thing? If so, has anyone had any luck becoming more normal about touch?",6.881484696208311,6.614968030150756,7.119725902238468,76.23956144358158,64.678391959799,10.653449063499316,32.16126084970306,10.230975488527342,3.0807547738693466,814,28,155,17,11,264,127,199,0.095,0.773,0.133,0.7834,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,0,1,9,0,16,3,0,6,0,38,28,15,0,8,8,0,7,1,1,4,1,2,0,1,14,9,1,1,6,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,5,9,20,6,26,17,4,19,0,0,0,1,4,8,0,9,10,110,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631667533894054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257452430433097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903735169572326,0.1394834661898088,0.0,0.12118646751281666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467721378096964,0.0,0.0,0.15034725478837793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506276251555754,0.0,0.17558793851027354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913015429466407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392971660519119,0.11372093602309433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899139954846974,0.0,0.2293944008773489,0.0,0.0,0.13316335597364445,0.2566665348740971,0.0,0.1376650019837149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442231097411648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517535473514383,0.0,0.28449370088384945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14996490139674135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470210045459905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28417317470745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176067666266262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06650728797525181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27260778435155963,0.0,0.13676303341357476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371891798835896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086593764683081,0.0,0.10007278747480128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333805949560936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224666212250518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542111788017215,0.0,0.0,0.10825774276464044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480117324435616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09044014576203764,0.17445595883496678,0.0,0.0,0.07937974638083735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242478804447032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993032111934804,0.1123232735447004,0.08029426404452454,0.10805535739304124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13873028215426975,0.09670436741011447,0.0,0.0,0.08766463577725474
mentalhealth,elsa11,2020/02/01,i want to become something that is not real hi there everyone my name is bloom i am a girl who has a dream of being bloom from winx club its very depressing for me everytime i looking mirror and do not see her its has brang my life down to a place where i can not live anymore better yet as i am transgender it is making it harder for me what can i do about this its hurting and ruining my life knowning i will never be her,1.0493333333333332,3.06124837777778,3.1255555555555574,90.465,81.8888888888889,6.222222222222222,21.11111111111111,7.3871296695380915,0.6971111111111106,334,10,72,5,9,113,62,90,0.115,0.848,0.038,-0.7717,0,0,1,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,3,0,14,2,0,1,1,11,18,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,9,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,2,14,1,9,15,0,5,0,3,2,0,6,3,0,0,2,58,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564850178588896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28562933680749863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287314689934156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22275204164294235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471258373805873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768618058001325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3653468530056913,0.0,0.0,0.2283692887612916,0.0,0.21717860406332865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263319453908346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19946638688468124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27020651236392595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943701629659877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20608944545593316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19910100555256152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133914727992764,0.15254284104332438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,casspnwlove,2020/02/01,"Those (or those close to someone) with BPD or anything similar, what made you go to the doctor for help? I don’t know if I should call the years leading up to seeking medical or psychological attention “symptoms” or “tells” or “behaviors”?

I have had people close to me wonder if I am bi polar and I’ve wonder myself for many years. I have felt at a total loss for what’s “wrong” with me or if I just find myself in situations were it’s difficult for me to process stress or handle life well or if I’m “normal” and I’m just overthinking...

So, I’m curious of your personal journeys or the perspective of a S/O or family member that has seen someone go through BPD.",3.5642105263157897,4.875060796992481,5.389481203007518,80.11143984962409,72.60902255639098,8.929022556390981,28.33759398496241,9.3871,2.5125945864661663,518,20,103,12,10,178,83,133,0.086,0.856,0.057,-0.5693,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,2,4,5,0,1,5,0,8,5,0,2,1,33,19,17,0,6,16,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,6,0,0,4,1,4,1,0,5,2,13,1,17,13,1,11,0,1,1,1,6,5,0,16,2,70,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13889957873813613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4251695514148373,0.0,0.17235320199281548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276345676561738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15911995016621286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16206462545845532,0.0,0.15427076951405466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185420427155256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313620848167087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09276242990029278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922118896105065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971293836892222,0.0,0.1711263093512103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170037911021657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16537811314563647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11701755692717658,0.1473806952572388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18972674596878555,0.0,0.0,0.2860300072580637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19334808320316585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17543717402641776,0.0,0.0,0.14752967728681884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517622520489643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36609055783891337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18454508965939675,0.0,0.2173901242412999
mentalhealth,BrittanyTheKilljoy,2020/02/01,"IDK I hope this gets buried, but I need to tell someone. Today my brother, who was the person I confided in about my struggles, told me to kill myself. I know he might not have meant it, but it hurt. Later today, he said, Imagine wanting to kill yourself, to me. My friend, his girlfriend told him to stop. She said something after, that, all though well intentioned, deepened the wound. She said that having those thoughts and acting on them are not the same thing, and she did not act on them. Last month I cut myself for the first time (I did not use a blade, but I'm not going to tell others how to discretely self harm, just thought I should clarify). I had taken many Advil pills in hopes of dying. I've been using mcr's reunion as a method of coping. My entire family bashes the music and culture, but they have no understanding of what that does to me. Today, I just sort of broke down again. I tried cutting two days ago, so I tried to avoid that today. I can't talk to friends and I feel trapped. I just needed an outlet, so I apologize to anyone who reads this. I don't want to dump all my problems on strangers, but I didn't know what else to do. Sorry for being obnoxious. I am from northern VA",2.8682365145228204,4.555690128630712,3.651408713692948,90.34615871369296,75.09958506224066,6.14780082987552,22.83838174273859,6.742157984588678,0.5490546058091289,935,26,194,8,20,297,149,241,0.231,0.7040000000000001,0.065,-0.9933,0,2,2,0,0,2,38.0,0,0,3,1,10,16,5,2,8,0,17,3,0,4,2,44,41,14,3,8,13,1,1,0,3,2,3,3,0,2,15,4,0,2,8,1,0,3,9,11,1,2,15,4,36,5,29,23,3,23,0,2,0,0,28,6,0,4,14,134,51,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084769961307387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07954862502499012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337038944656696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807232315429955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995583852693584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503784183620753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724952853473776,0.0,0.05752408106389721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677026571520823,0.0,0.0,0.1757924104028781,0.0,0.05943863173643293,0.0,0.06465648378483592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22599286732416954,0.0,0.0,0.1217900694978334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517329546322981,0.0,0.12504688270893574,0.09273539817435693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534201700437728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120688950269845,0.0,0.0,0.0908078406311996,0.0,0.0,0.16871377604039162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933707284944232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885978226034268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379792059385062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32465578937172485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868393202612915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639452310401972,0.08758349759822083,0.0,0.12735299180359375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951144178377615,0.0,0.11893410952309763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144171255865174,0.19887497849723484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558182837002482,0.0,0.11177563112664504,0.18063679231948265,0.06633853048842514,0.0,0.4313517608129791,0.21741874306071293,0.0,0.15448083167608748,0.0,0.11113395850811823,0.1184355982825107,0.0,0.1965165517414314,0.0,0.0,0.13420560599445847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10229031598249932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aehlert95,2020/02/01,"I have to wait 7 weeks to see a psychiatrist. Mental health is rapidly declining. I need help. I was on medication while I was pregnant and they were great! I felt really balanced. Fast forward and I gave birth and my hormones were all over the place so I stopped taking my meds. It’s been since may. Just recently I’ve been having extreme ADHD tendencies and long, draining panic attacks/elevated moments where I am in flight or fight for hours! I need help coming up with things to do while I’m waiting to see a psychiatrist. My next therapy appointment is next week but it’s rapidly getting worse and I just need some suggestions.

Thank you in advance.",2.6068817204301062,5.467201838709676,3.7162580645161287,83.14272043010753,83.03225806451613,6.8550537634408615,27.62150537634409,8.021203637495839,2.255170537634409,524,24,94,11,15,169,87,124,0.08800000000000001,0.831,0.081,-0.2334,0,0,0,0,1,0,13.0,0,1,1,1,4,4,1,1,3,0,13,2,0,0,1,21,27,10,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,7,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,8,3,15,2,11,18,2,23,0,0,2,0,7,8,0,3,14,60,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19874870112889445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424559825314357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878600485802247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640165031199795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823266023858313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17578596986924888,0.0,0.0,0.2216948516527928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16286113514966855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635173601892726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18369442554385967,0.16659798823558866,0.1666591774800818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3678705646749499,0.0,0.0,0.3517565336647831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940320167306337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727817535427318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594350677043758,0.0,0.16328793410771522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635650448318302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367999697581524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382609664719162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434147410843015,0.0,0.0,0.15225514885932226,0.18912080915560064,0.0,0.10986785048696744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653078174210577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16853132830904793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CelebratingCheescake,2020/02/01,"Lakers lost and I’m about to cry. I’m the biggest Laker fan. I watch every game. My girlfriend and I fight a lot but whenever the Lakers win, I know that everything will be okay. This superstition started bc it was true for so long. No matter what we fought about, when the Lakers got a W, we got back together and say sorry. But today the Lakers lost. I’m so fucked. Why am I so sad?",-0.3666363636363634,1.8863937000000028,2.1438636363636405,92.64568181818186,93.25,4.90909090909091,16.022727272727273,6.574015621080383,-0.17262500000000006,296,7,64,4,11,101,56,80,0.282,0.573,0.145,-0.9279999999999999,0,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,2,0,0,3,7,9,3,0,6,1,4,1,0,0,1,11,15,9,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,6,2,7,3,4,7,1,6,0,3,1,1,7,1,1,1,5,37,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18432557284279424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26331500646431844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20196971633732014,0.0,0.21543984108883127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22161209519989336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3834429995470367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13174076225769807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21213969594319412,0.0,0.0,0.5233531578474478,0.20379660611161707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906305081019264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683406391674073,0.16967108237650153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272212171133209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21630495603368569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EliIsASadBoi,2020/02/01,"It hurts I've been on meds for a year and a half since I attempted suicide and failed. If I died my parents would have gotten a divorce and I would have destroyed my siblings' life. I'm the first born, 17. I have no irl friends. I have online ""friends"" on discord but the most we'd do is chat. Ever since my attempt, I have lost interest in everything. I don't find joy in anything. And how I feel... consistent emotional and mental pain. I don't even know if I'm making any sense. I've been thinking that maybe I'm not one of the lucky people who can get better. Maybe I'm ment to be one the people who succeed in taking my own life. I've used to be invisible so I'm not getting my hopes up for any response. I just wanted to leave a message so I'm not totally forgetting.",1.0589647239263795,3.010691840490804,3.0788305214723932,91.13395130368099,81.5153374233129,6.038190184049081,24.29792944785276,7.1686216300943375,0.9600677914110428,602,23,132,8,16,203,96,163,0.18100000000000002,0.7020000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.7786,1,0,0,0,1,1,20.0,1,0,0,7,6,13,1,0,8,0,17,3,0,3,2,28,35,11,2,6,7,1,1,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,1,0,0,6,5,0,4,4,1,16,8,12,26,3,10,0,3,0,0,9,6,0,5,4,81,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21229351108222771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844901590614802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804918447540304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199708635799973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558057662724094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309617003338448,0.1411926113271048,0.0,0.0,0.14028389552689735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892394490785791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266370501038714,0.13277032816121326,0.0,0.0,0.24118995483726086,0.0,0.1631014771484597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15503288605731275,0.0,0.0,0.16709789287540466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578314593897474,0.0,0.0,0.16527708844647476,0.0,0.0,0.22050238793133667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17039099952007275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104191486306548,0.0,0.3136273696009206,0.0,0.17338113358918578,0.0,0.15730230805310233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21154165181798712,0.0,0.1660910827831623,0.0,0.1733198044374403,0.0,0.0,0.21642671875016484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582390158156613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17073745207309515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173604787910269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001636062568192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13481190152255307,0.0,0.0,0.09206610221262633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22176413920301946,0.0,0.0,0.10051703460942013
mentalhealth,nativeindigo,2020/02/01,Words seem unfathomable I don’t know how to describe what I’m feeling. I disassociate. I feel empty. I feel like less than half a person. I feel disconnected. I don’t care. This is my reality. I want to cry. I want to fall apart. I want to just be. I’m numb.,-2.059636363636365,-0.657702781818184,1.5927272727272737,92.54909090909094,113.1818181818182,4.90909090909091,15.909090909090908,6.574015621080383,-0.01118181818181796,197,6,47,4,11,71,35,55,0.145,0.635,0.22,0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,0,12,16,1,0,3,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,4,10,2,5,15,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,26,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29298370088434816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3156525756011319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5811934427238279,0.2052907626685383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579260957310226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14039007412041504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509125495431411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616026706059971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5084789061696345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hendesm,2020/02/01,Can Somebody explain dissociation to me? I’ve heard this term numerous times and I’ve googled it but I still really don’t understand it or even what it is. If you’ve gone through it can you describe it?,1.3951219512195152,3.9669841219512207,3.1494634146341483,87.08760975609756,85.82926829268294,7.182439024390242,27.71219512195122,8.238735603445708,2.202869268292684,163,8,34,4,5,54,31,41,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,8,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,2,6,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,22,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873074045583602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37565871893223135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4682946406928389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419307904128833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6104563582521255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ADHDvm,2020/02/01,"Has anyone had intrusive thoughts that are fleeting but relentless? They negatively impact my QOL and I’m not sure where to go from here. Any experiences/advice? Has anyone experienced intrusive thoughts that only last a couple seconds and then go away, but this happens every 5-10 minutes all day long? The intrusive thoughts are a memory coupled with crippling shame. They are not always the same memories. It makes me have to put my hand over my mouth or eyes and squeeze my eyes shut and scrunch my face in pain. Sometimes I can think of this memory later and it does not always trigger the feeling. The memory+feeling combo just happens out of nowhere. The moments leave sort of a “bad taste in my mouth” and I never fully get rid of the feeling of unease and it is honestly exhausting.

I also get disturbing intrusive thoughts when, for example, I’m driving and my brain plays out a scenario where the beams in the truck in front of me get loose and smash through my windshield. I will experience the process of my death in exquisite detail and the last thoughts going through my head. I can’t drive behind any vehicle carrying a load. It happens pretty frequently when I’m driving but also in other situations. Basically this thought about dying will play through my head for 30 seconds or so and I will be completely lost in thought and sometimes even have a look of shock or a frown on my face. It sometimes happens mid-conversation and I’ll realize someone asked me a question and is waiting for a response but I have no idea what they said because it was so vivid. I know about the call of the void but these moments are frequent, disturbing, vivid, and disruptive.

These intrusive thoughts negatively impact my quality of life, and I have even started looking for more treatment options like NAC, which I’m unsure if it helps. My pdoc said I could try neurotherapy but it seems expensive and I need to get put on a waiting list. I am already taking psychiatric medications so I’m not really sure where to go next.

Are these symptoms of OCD or PTSD? They started in full severity after an extremely traumatic and stressful period. I have mentioned them to my pdocs in the past but no one seems to understand how much it impacts me. I think I need to stress it in the future. I am still functional, but it seriously impacts my quality of life.",5.967311581900049,7.503436292906178,6.217124086513626,75.5967970768436,67.07780320366132,9.666169631652764,35.835904628330994,9.935076216389866,3.8104245810880637,1888,95,326,44,31,604,221,437,0.162,0.773,0.065,-0.9942,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,5,1,18,18,0,6,25,0,25,17,10,3,4,73,72,40,2,4,18,0,4,1,0,3,6,2,0,0,22,21,1,2,19,2,1,10,10,12,0,3,13,14,41,6,48,54,5,52,0,1,6,0,12,21,0,10,22,226,63,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657588986869403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864760535064107,0.12533450009288558,0.13040939293530254,0.0,0.0,0.1065797129829858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095871404651344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325927948524269,0.0,0.0736250730253397,0.0,0.06543023610765257,0.047769652658029314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747956478835965,0.08001787898671453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216262231325089,0.0,0.0,0.06256686568253618,0.17341540966080815,0.0,0.050537964494902624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132892465765515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857641315338689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351668457306026,0.0,0.06602461527384818,0.0,0.0,0.07665452437468381,0.0,0.0,0.11886879659510236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16376674475792874,0.0,0.17814309595633082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27718628130778605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16084708542191342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05252539166449263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846283528733749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043066521564157696,0.1277533974048055,0.0,0.08297561503170929,0.0,0.0,0.1107008928251329,0.03828444011430639,0.0,0.0,0.06934921761026605,0.13161118085203266,0.0,0.08554300002461883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052308234242361716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894296612981898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05760617754517955,0.11621106126933912,0.06043875001269989,0.0,0.08334045451909469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05310112499381815,0.059598960969451435,0.08338427228332135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480681273406686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972383566803677,0.0,0.0,0.0916027195843877,0.15755389163088013,0.08778503669101029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05020165462518047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908323716687527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426783458774672,0.0,0.08852843192869338,0.0,0.0,0.08808383960343391,0.0,0.0,0.06639712590978981,0.0,0.232510469030659,0.0,0.11093215498006727,0.0,0.06258117975194906,0.0,0.17953021290209684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477133130324035,0.08144966498273845,0.05891958770350082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042431306305118,0.0,0.49769482569605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053203661894658506,0.0,0.0,0.08157915074572554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chancesare789,2020/02/01,"I feel stupid for having depression. I was diagnosed with MDD when I was 15. I've been off & on anti-depressants (wellbutrin to be specfic) since then & I'm 22 now. 
I've never felt stupid for having depression before. But, I felt like I had reasons before. When I was younger I was in a coming of age really. I had an on again off again relationship that was toxic. My mom died in a car accident. I broke my femur in that same accident. Multiple surgeries. 
& Bc of all of the above mentioned I always felt like I had good reason to be depressed. 
But now. I've moved on about my mom's death (I really only have bad days on mother's day & the anniversary of her death. This is a huge win, it's taken me years to get to this point). I got married to the love of my life 5 months ago. We're currently looking to buy our first home together. I'm in-between jobs rn, but I feel like that just can't be a reason to be depressed. 

I haven't showered in 2 weeks. I haven't done any laundry (except for my husband's laundry bc I would feel bad if he suffered bc of my illness). It took me a week to do the dishes that were starting to stink in the sink. & The only reason I finally did them was bc my dad yelled at me. (My husband & I are staying with my dad until we find a house. Living with my dad sucks.) Today I didn't wake up until 2pm. I didn't get out of bed until 4pm. & Then I got back in bed at 4:30pm, laid there & cried for an hour until my husband came & consoled me & finally convinced me to go to the store with him. ""Just to pick some stuff up for the super bowl party"" he said. But I really think that was just his way of getting me out of bed. 

I feel like I don't have a valid reason to be sad. I keep trying to figure out why, but I literally can't think of anything. & For some reason this just makes me even more depressed. 
I just feel stupid.",0.8951328947368431,2.6881646475000025,3.02926315789474,92.09278947368423,81.275,5.9105263157894745,20.526315789473685,6.950104931194217,0.3311500000000001,1449,40,327,17,38,492,185,400,0.151,0.772,0.077,-0.9831,3,0,0,0,0,0,72.0,2,0,1,3,15,24,4,0,17,0,34,6,1,8,2,49,63,14,3,2,12,9,8,4,0,1,3,2,5,0,11,10,1,1,18,0,2,6,8,15,0,1,25,12,52,9,59,32,5,58,0,8,1,1,21,21,1,3,33,202,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05160121856465871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04843685284342465,0.6937966696132435,0.0,0.03958599727868093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047903323735038965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044761255118645066,0.09720878677593993,0.0,0.0,0.09906785131471174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06657875290306968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05014428228107292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394289191206921,0.07508354710186395,0.0,0.3008262543078998,0.05908371748847247,0.06041462300972674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05957084766084954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03844832266025527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471680906504531,0.0831729950111234,0.16767727353522993,0.12753628931670238,0.0532044998409799,0.049514898712505764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123973593399594,0.0,0.03308308830250308,0.04882526776862428,0.09311453457856092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05839114793774421,0.0,0.05732686397890546,0.06716856269662666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05776619587094758,0.05174129259334228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04111669209338955,0.1137573145780711,0.0,0.051402056168460386,0.0,0.048883222718795055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253839186221725,0.0,0.038856806054662484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635383437864212,0.04646407652106484,0.061869895178471926,0.0,0.0,0.044896502844055386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854534285058724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05502893489831838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187584434731516,0.3591083457297557,0.0,0.062497651905269284,0.0,0.0,0.05537272015103841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04815337466140671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0412025878307646,0.062045997597973086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663854541783361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459949876693646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517794796847145,0.0,0.06467541429396081,0.039521968225116715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046205790587116304,0.093387935358918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052527064862067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04135196863176599,0.0,0.0,0.03748646897613719
mentalhealth,lillambshoof,2020/02/01,"A simple reminder that it’s true, for most of us struggling- this too shall pass! Right up until December 2019 I was seriously suicidal. I had planned my fool proof method- but removed myself from gaining the means of said method around October 2019 knowing that eventually I will no longer have such inclinations and the removal would hopefully decrease suicidal idealisation. And I was right- now just a couple of months down the line I can look back and just be so relieved I no longer feel that way- that things feel so much better, that I actually value my life to some degree. No longer do I have a death wish while crossing the road and hoping, just hoping someone does me a favour...

One thing that got me through that time was every day, every time I had those thoughts, remembering the impact my actions could have on others- even those you don’t think would be impacted. How they have to deal with the aftermath of any actions I took and how I didn’t want that for those I cared about. 

There’s still work to do. I still have the remnants of depression but it’s not as severe and as all encompassing as it was. I still need to accept I have anxiety and work out ways to continue dealing with that as a functioning human being... but I’m getting there. 

I just wanted to reassure anyone who’s feeling that bad, that honestly it’s surprising how the tides can turn and don’t give up on that feeling that things can improve.",6.353807369101489,7.017678179487183,6.276604180133593,78.66496444731742,65.73992673992674,9.646972635207927,32.17603964662789,9.627879704456738,2.884504158586511,1145,44,215,22,17,361,156,273,0.128,0.6779999999999999,0.19399999999999998,0.9628,0,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,1,1,1,5,21,17,0,1,13,0,28,1,0,3,3,48,52,22,3,10,8,0,4,0,0,4,1,1,0,1,26,12,0,0,10,0,0,7,7,5,0,1,11,6,25,12,30,33,4,33,0,1,1,0,10,11,0,5,13,162,51,2,0.0,0.0,0.11214982425133126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07815266386223735,0.0,0.0879169987338477,0.0,0.0,0.08035794723675659,0.0,0.0,0.10230725279285087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836991779472693,0.09595723437094476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164146285736723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717328142136695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175793564731397,0.12716187574943913,0.0,0.07411685471666317,0.2369644171822305,0.09898438315763887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057128539856597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590660949577822,0.0,0.19365785175099245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23243730835188675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06004335626669593,0.11024614121070872,0.0,0.0,0.0919156952189008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.342438154699982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315955052453025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117463843792949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650771323885096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12518657257938248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173171332418822,0.0,0.08448279891306303,0.08521512916727779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787587817976235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018716014213946,0.19628994819083231,0.1093196049763898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12983207759020005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737523431827656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753367841797679,0.0,0.0,0.12014413693140885,0.0,0.2514177024543173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290523780005512,0.07363903845064433,0.0,0.09123728927851286,0.1340269082231946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768545094072936,0.0,0.12500495526054944,0.0,0.0,0.13824013453877884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557100455214285,0.18244358452419712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215760972420654,0.0,0.0,0.16733294423489434,0.0,0.0,0.1632782663914677,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mrdeadlyfry,2020/02/01,"I Think I'm Regressing When I was younger, I use to have suffer from large amount of anxiety, experience panic attacks on a daily basis, and overall was a self loathing person due to what I believed was my horrible and physically abusive upbringing. I never believed in myself and always pushed everyone away from myself as I genuinely did not want to live. Throughout my high school years, I gathered numerous awkward and devastating memories that use to take over my thought process and hindered my day to day life, such as the sudden death of a family member I was extremely close to or just genuinely causing social damage that still exists into today. Due to these memories, I use to punish myself through over eating and had consistent thoughts about how everyone's lives would be better without me in it

Lately, I've been thinking about the various bad events that have occurred in my past at random, usually during moments that should be considered 'good' or 'calming' (such as spending time with my partner or with family). These bad memories tend to either make me negative or cause me to panic (short breathe and blurred vision). Alongside the reoccurring bad memories, I've been sort of enacting what my younger more mentally broken self use to do; such as over eating unhealthy foods, being overly sluggish, being more negative about current or future events and generally being more self-destructive.

I've been a lot more sad lately, crying when I'm alone and willingly letting everyone I love, leave me. I don't know what to do or where to go. I've been told to go see a therapist but I've heard that there's a chance that they may do more damage then good... Any advice?",11.226387631975868,9.017245565359477,10.403071895424835,62.402285067873315,57.3986928104575,13.729110105580695,43.799899446958285,12.230961643895464,5.488441226747109,1357,62,214,33,13,436,172,306,0.185,0.7929999999999999,0.023,-0.9897,1,1,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,1,1,14,17,2,3,9,0,26,6,1,8,1,47,47,24,1,3,11,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,0,4,12,13,3,0,5,0,1,3,6,12,0,0,14,2,26,5,41,23,9,40,0,4,1,1,10,15,0,11,22,153,38,1,0.0,0.11357566297017388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367100470478372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927963589494844,0.0,0.0,0.07976125958272882,0.0,0.0,0.06518650200071144,0.0,0.07333085438984857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905193691842198,0.09006143544100166,0.0,0.24011144884314334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21599753466676552,0.0,0.0847783184151764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19694446248948605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529514823672688,0.12364053276010473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19617265250395846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747883317796333,0.0,0.09376719389949184,0.18073215838607606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591147381769648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895624463563804,0.1608017295953673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127889022048638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05268086797257202,0.0,0.21626325173390146,0.10149943068693093,0.0,0.09802096107997256,0.0677071064432126,0.0,0.0,0.1692881557929353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149476225758677,0.08651528878078843,0.0,0.06398573838602338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966019843597424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393134374929873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22493664170090025,0.0,0.0,0.0915069915554108,0.0,0.08369921914397764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701307859669303,0.07638615143670145,0.0,0.30000136355677903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771482187637948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655205826569537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207303743308975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112981419060566,0.0,0.12284344742886852,0.0,0.1522005635169914,0.05589537764471493,0.0,0.090861861842723,0.09159611059321113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3311609947386773,0.10557367970354728,0.0,0.05653933674643988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240337220042424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06809453774705539,0.0,0.0,0.06172919600104612
mentalhealth,QuirkArsonist,2020/02/01,"Therapy apps/cites So, i’m only 14 and i can’t talk to my parents about a therapist. i’m going through some stuff rn, does anybody know any free therapy apps or just someone to talk to? or any calming apps. most of the ones i find cost money.",-0.78779411764706,1.3480900980392152,1.7040931372549046,94.19966911764706,99.0,4.9029411764705895,22.061274509803926,6.6274283507984215,0.7348215686274511,189,8,41,3,8,64,39,51,0.0,0.875,0.125,0.7184,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,5,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,3,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,6,5,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,0,21,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32476314387882443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208961826864578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21824460446475336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13570667034992126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122965475928622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16180648093176805,0.1816062869247948,0.0,0.0,0.2651418043755663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20232123686075065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733509953159959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3838516917723133,0.0,0.0,0.546141515328698,0.27724707848940866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the-angsty-cat,2020/02/01,"I question my sanity all the time Im extremely scared of the idea of going crazy.
I interpret everything as a proof of my mental insanity, i don't even know what's normal and what's not anymore

Im scared of the idea of seeing things or hearing things that are not there. I also worry about losing control and hurting me at other people

Im extremely scared of mental hospitals and institutions. I find myself preferring death over losing my mind

I just dont want to be insane",4.525136778115503,6.015704765957447,6.217355623100302,74.40500000000003,70.48936170212765,9.201215805471127,27.258358662613983,9.606745405546679,2.6858954407294835,384,13,67,9,7,132,62,94,0.308,0.6679999999999999,0.024,-0.9798,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,5,6,0,3,4,0,4,0,0,1,2,20,9,6,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,1,7,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,0,2,11,0,11,8,1,4,0,3,1,0,2,2,0,2,1,47,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120921906714065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900885744456054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721017885318275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16427569338375256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257955260711144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597383861745154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12811088888033034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966062761623117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15797937048308622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15005259806437587,0.3164649156620948,0.4542160400507325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703259267234792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31362397385010937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825124793463515,0.0,0.14152958586933048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373347468426878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717474852667728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702008726364552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42099745480895895,0.0,0.11169564048366276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862426018827378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173300904256472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267463815935633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234727040125408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,in-jail-out-shortley,2020/02/01,"What books have helped you understand mental health? I think reading is a great way to learn more about your mental health and would like to share a few of my favorites.

1. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking by Susan Cain
2.  Lost Connections: Uncovering the Real Cause of Depression by Johann Hari 

If you have your own favorite feel free to share it.",2.956666666666667,5.737758000000002,3.3255555555555567,87.25000000000004,80.1111111111111,6.377777777777778,21.5,7.645422480735847,1.0514666666666672,304,9,56,5,8,94,58,72,0.096,0.6679999999999999,0.23600000000000002,0.8979,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,4,0,2,1,7,0,0,5,0,5,2,0,1,0,10,9,2,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,6,6,10,7,3,4,0,2,0,0,8,2,0,1,2,34,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297068356155501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925930951443671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130628368194787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24652842047097595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4753693309231784,0.0,0.0,0.14987961408081812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924349020154728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440943594081267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4506881962755146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236683400853765,0.2545146629661322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869461572315289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797275025398221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327886769853718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327836355587952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748948627981845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15884458583764213,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,5h8s7s34nam3,2020/02/01,"Should I start taking my pills again That's the question but it came out all melodramatically. Only stopped this time because I ran out and took a while to refill. But now I can't seem to start again. Also, not a poet. And not trying to be. 

Life is mostly fine and dandy 
when I take my pills
It's not
when I don't
But
is that because they make me complacent
agreeable
conforming
When I am really
independent
strong willed
free thinking
Are those such bad things to be
They may make me harder to be around
But maybe only
to those who want me bent over 
backwards for them
kneeling at their feet
beneath them

Or is this all being spoken by a disease",2.0171428571428582,4.507577364341088,2.9136489479512733,90.58482558139536,81.55813953488372,5.236101882613512,20.06699889258029,6.5431188927421005,0.1869464008859354,516,14,104,5,14,163,85,129,0.064,0.8109999999999999,0.125,0.8449,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,5,1,9,4,0,0,4,0,14,4,1,3,2,28,26,13,0,2,8,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,3,0,1,3,5,1,0,0,3,0,16,4,14,16,3,22,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,5,11,81,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17359637356169308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19324452526659566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18125020167880468,0.26465621075090723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24827822240018896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533278828274958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289801124675488,0.0,0.2180829923376611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301936333467353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431758855103071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13906506481885447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197618719600376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072963916822853,0.0,0.0,0.18148606602193065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32642973002637626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14421629239236886,0.1390941564553256,0.0,0.0,0.12657932622324644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411804996900148,0.14738101254276148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803762049812872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,prettyboyA,2020/02/01,"the love of my life moved on the girl I've been in love with for about a year now is no longer into me and is likely about to start dating one of my better friends

​

I feel so fucking shitty and alone",7.1946666666666665,4.5743228000000045,6.820555555555552,86.23750000000004,65.44444444444447,9.0,29.16666666666667,3.1291,0.9903333333333326,166,3,38,0,2,52,37,45,0.149,0.603,0.248,0.7759999999999999,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,0,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,5,8,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,1,4,5,10,7,0,8,0,0,0,3,4,3,1,0,5,26,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749480712782342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876379029059981,0.3225765300777224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347876774964159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423020059254814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20510236821353955,0.2454238198783257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18751013901873728,0.1296958047019165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4791961930949743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821538420367026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17989013594263634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879018612326676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3225765300777224,0.17095473033364844
mentalhealth,aylenshay,2020/02/01,"I don’t know how to move forward with my life. I’ve been struggling with cannabis use for the better part of a decade and in the past year I’ve been desperate to quit but I keep falling back into my old habits. I’m getting sick of it and I feel like I’m stuck. I want to leave it behind for good but I’m usually quick to relapse and I don’t have much in the way of a support system. Admittedly, because of my use and the anxiety it’s caused me, I have very few friends and those that I do have are mostly pot smokers. 

I’ve now been sober for five days, and while I wasn’t necessarily expecting things to get any easier, I sure as hell wasn’t expect them to get so much harder. My negative mind loop hasn’t ended and I’m still struggling with destructive habits—binge eating, chronic laziness, reliance on porn for self pleasure, mindless scrolling through social media. If anything, each of these feels like it’s getting worse to consume the space that being sober has left. 

My job and coworkers are pretty good, but I work as a paper pusher and don’t really have anything going for me outside of work. It feels like there’s no end in sight, and most of the time, I’d just rather not be alive. I don’t know how to connect to anyone or anything anymore and I don’t know how to get that back. 

I don’t even know why I’m writing this. But I don’t know who else to turn to.",4.368140350877193,4.6533284280701785,5.076228070175438,86.86942982456144,69.98245614035089,7.877192982456141,28.464912280701753,7.594959193182576,1.4726491228070175,1082,36,234,11,18,350,152,285,0.16,0.696,0.14400000000000002,-0.6135,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,4,13,14,2,2,9,0,23,5,0,6,1,49,50,24,0,5,9,0,3,3,1,0,3,0,0,1,13,16,1,1,9,0,0,4,13,4,0,1,6,4,22,10,36,42,7,27,1,0,1,1,7,8,1,4,18,145,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07498610362630713,0.0,0.08435481085060847,0.0,0.10935634623718007,0.07710203415861205,0.0,0.272223804722082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957875741470424,0.0,0.06721842317176284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752319229945944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327573515681802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711138158775558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283181638699387,0.09211486591143568,0.0,0.19532965202527444,0.0,0.0,0.07283105404577704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16726462569546804,0.2363267033128379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519287685644784,0.0,0.28805271071900496,0.0,0.06266791437046318,0.18497533674373307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942409557556478,0.09801137257827662,0.0,0.0,0.30300237807452657,0.0,0.0,0.11675801882141662,0.1198066362525692,0.0,0.07788563497290797,0.16161430238481594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11133936843775444,0.0,0.0,0.11719756202024995,0.16211951329266058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570784403591862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194096296384704,0.10526339872065474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121823212986965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728371999763182,0.0,0.0,0.07064058197523593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11503369892669164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240446310446857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806026397697922,0.0,0.0,0.23055236397092255,0.0,0.0,0.12513095712683234,0.1039263991994534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325723997021068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429822818614228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994005150602037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19047250509157848,0.12144475686660333,0.09098274814764457,0.06503899479350714,0.08752570199783538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949982821460847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605530109454883,0.0,0.1123726359049756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100905472811762
mentalhealth,splitbrainmind,2020/02/01,"Gofundme Mental Health Hey! I just created a gofundme with my story. any help is welcome! 💙💙💙 
gf.me/u/xatzqy",0.7225714285714275,-0.2850075999999948,2.0442857142857167,85.49500000000002,150.0,3.1428571428571432,27.857142857142854,5.288315135182226,1.6872142857142856,88,5,13,1,7,28,17,20,0.0,0.611,0.389,0.8065,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38892898679469656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6079301161933021,0.0,0.0,0.38334964111466335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5763664370114796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mikarana,2020/02/01,"I am extremely scared of Death I am 19 years old and i am extremely scared of death.

i have full blown evening episodes where its extreme existential dread.

The Antidepressants dont help... nothing helps

i just feel so weird

like im so out of place in life

too aware of my life and just constantly dreading death

i hope that since i was technically dead before i was born that rebirth is the thing to be the thing for me but i just get eaten up by this extreme fear...

im perfectly healthy and as successful as never before but all my mind is obsessed about is what comes after.

i just want this to stop...

its eating me up so much and i dont know why...

it hurts so much.

im scared.

the PTSD really doesnt do me any favors in that case either.",1.043943498452009,3.36504909868421,2.4141640866873075,93.67944272445824,84.32894736842105,5.944891640866874,20.125386996904027,7.285733465282438,0.4410831269349855,581,17,129,9,17,187,91,152,0.182,0.6779999999999999,0.14,-0.6275,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,12,14,0,7,4,0,14,4,0,0,3,22,21,12,4,2,7,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,11,6,2,1,2,0,0,1,4,9,0,0,3,1,16,5,17,17,5,16,0,1,0,0,2,8,0,1,8,85,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304135332314964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23284513693687814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785712639761285,0.0,0.1478523225350404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32070080738014584,0.0,0.0,0.13999960508512213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903674081552524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15395898536167335,0.06917960522104287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714820819795083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341327397168106,0.0,0.0,0.13589176093827002,0.0,0.0,0.14646716248008632,0.0,0.4433627634399916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519193544627961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932780750530928,0.06684266676572455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13814780361463094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20115485653194656,0.0,0.10552295435884347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128115592658576,0.0,0.14356812634053082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294633756075015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993364515014194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764951142500801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4109379205200572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317777632412425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143864926679434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18179242334058046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069916693527499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345752379191854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881067055174184
mentalhealth,oblivious_pan,2020/02/01,"Mental illness seems so normal that it doesn't feel real. Anyone else feel the same way ? So, I may just be dissociating here, but mental illness doesn't feel real anymore to me. I have depression and anxiety. I was diagnosed around three years ago but I've had the illnesses for probably around five or six years. Treatment is only going so-so. At this point, I'm used to feeling miserable all the time. I expect it. 

But so many people around me have mental illnesses too, and it's not like kids making up illnesses for attention or anything. My school has a higher number of mentally ill students for a variety of reasons. I've seen a lot of kids from my school in the local psych unit during my hospitalizations. I also spend a lot of my time in spec ed, where I'm around a lot of other students with depression and anxiety as well as other mental illnesses.

On the internet, everyone is talking about mental illness now, too. People mention mental illnesses on all sorts of subreddits, not just ones about mental illness like this one. A lot of artists I follow open up about their illnesses through their art, too. 

It feels like everywhere I look, in real life and online, mental illness is there. 

It almost doesn't feel real to me anymore. Like, I've had it for so long and it's just a *thing* all around me. It feels almost like just an abstract concept like time.

Maybe I'm just dissociating, but it's just weird to me. I know my perspective is really limited because of where I live and go to school, and what parts of the internet I'm on, but I just feel weird. It's kind of like that thing where if you say a word enough times, it loses all meaning. Apple, apple, apple, apple, apple, apple. It's just a collection of squiggles, now. Same with depression.

I know this isn't exactly a refined thought or anything, but it's hard for me to turn my thoughts into words right now. Sorry, I don't know.",3.5202591463414628,5.582998420054203,4.800412432249324,81.18443978658539,74.28455284552845,7.8645325203252066,26.436399051490522,8.660442795831766,2.104678116531165,1503,55,277,30,32,497,162,369,0.244,0.733,0.023,-0.9981,0,0,0,0,0,0,54.0,0,1,2,2,33,16,0,1,17,0,17,14,0,3,5,79,44,24,0,3,20,0,9,7,0,1,14,1,0,2,23,16,0,1,17,2,1,3,7,7,1,5,6,12,27,9,46,36,12,37,0,5,2,0,8,22,0,13,18,191,50,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570661261786597,0.0,0.12892808058815936,0.0,0.0,0.05148208317969751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849611232372872,0.0,0.1276889231767172,0.04501373745193954,0.06596161300487025,0.105953200047612,0.28654488914944026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03924348411304703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634286421625055,0.0653410708329801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377853431244184,0.0,0.0,0.06651841688804107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06151476668635762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26040665128890983,0.0459907804504112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317360883967212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05766894492002895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703850390846032,0.1061393747347969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04547121956258373,0.22015868101672406,0.0,0.05684587117795161,0.056971419470500925,0.05406027673929475,0.0720211435434872,0.0,0.2189233256289463,0.0,0.0,0.04297199676469972,0.06526794484481828,0.06467512264946476,0.07012517995256771,0.0,0.0,0.5838898225873193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307557036818183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724673675137395,0.04896143781287576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06971377313758026,0.0,0.08926149906877924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060856860162125076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940905106232954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930994522663419,0.04124141010267119,0.06619004595645811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05497741353623937,0.0,0.05119499484838399,0.0,0.1954581976271106,0.0,0.058606197535090075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206452826764859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05174361266430178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855381366382398,0.0,0.0,0.10221593573836543,0.15015445928400956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07002344422402068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05560086338557292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05109928697759515,0.0,0.0,0.057882451469974124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082913063996895
mentalhealth,dorisantiago144,2020/02/01,"Growth. I’ve been dealing with anxiety since I was about 8, I never knew what was wrong I didn’t understand it, all I knew was that it hurt my body. It’s followed me throughout middle school and high school and it was a burden I just ignored. I’m 21 now and the past 4 months have been stressful since I’m going through my first breakup alone. I ended up taking myself to the hospital because the anxiety was just tearing me down it was so bad and it hit me all at once my mom even thought it was signs of a stroke 
But anyways 
After years and years sad it had to come to this point but so glad I’m finally getting help for it and taking medication to hopefully feel better. I think this is what I needed and the best self care I can give myself 
What’s better than a clear mind? 
I’m new to any medication, how should I expect to feel?",1.8188793103448264,3.7138251839080496,3.231709770114944,91.26239224137932,78.77011494252874,6.189080459770117,22.36925287356322,7.1686216300943375,0.6363459770114943,658,20,143,8,16,215,104,174,0.10099999999999999,0.708,0.19,0.977,1,1,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,0,4,9,13,0,1,7,0,15,4,1,1,4,32,37,12,0,4,4,1,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,15,9,0,1,7,0,0,4,2,7,0,1,14,3,18,6,16,21,3,21,0,2,0,0,5,6,0,1,11,93,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14472475019495412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502553200455346,0.0,0.2137959005889825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11667404276657768,0.08518200191112578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466447125998223,0.2471709498928366,0.0,0.15521561987340646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14247055511008272,0.0,0.0,0.12037052059596955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440620747655074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12376495912140052,0.0,0.0,0.09229456289184154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413098274089474,0.0,0.0,0.1530743769935676,0.0,0.1188596957450259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300649255717358,0.1340478712083764,0.07941540651780013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366235181103827,0.1476391603882572,0.0,0.1387897576397545,0.0,0.0,0.1495906877829625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28153940912567604,0.0,0.0,0.14109391216770506,0.16365756256530253,0.11153624751276173,0.0,0.0,0.10361275718293214,0.1077733128173062,0.13495826916959114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14881468707929402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13339418879378115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320960484472323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828413589350047,0.0,0.0,0.1457755225346256,0.0,0.0,0.23118275954002845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600675542693188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101287387744384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953743172991724,0.0,0.11093507916283876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454705024647564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15277979830372646,0.0,0.1799712980502848
mentalhealth,Neither-Reference,2020/02/01,"Probably the weirdest thing you've ever read I have this thing that happens and I don't know what it's called. I have no fucking idea. This isnt just a panic attack. here's my best explanation. 
It's a feeling.
Like a physical feeling.
It's old. I remember first feeling it when I was sitting down on a church pew in a dress. 
Its...a feeling of discomfort.
Theres not really easy warning signs.
It happens when I'm around my family members and when I was forced to go to church as a kid. 
Vulnerability, fear, disgust with my own body.
Suddenly my veins are alive and squirming and I want to rip my skin apart until I dont exist.
Suddenly I'm hyper aware of...well. I'm hyper aware of my vagina. Literally. And my breasts.
I'm scared someone is going to touch them.
Or my mind is convinced that my family members are aware of the fact that I have genitals. Abd they'll touch them.
Its remedied by running away and curling up in a tight ball and taking violent deep breaths in order to curb a severe panic attack. 
And in my head I'm saying ""I hate you. I hate you, body. I hate you.""
My family members have never touched me. I was sexually assaulted by a random person when I was 14 but this feeling is younger than that.
I don't remember anything traumatizing that started this. But it screws with me so bad that I sleep all day and avoid life. 
Anyone else or am I crazy?",0.922736572890024,3.392068289855076,3.0954475703324853,87.32819693094629,87.1159420289855,6.000682011935209,23.335038363171357,7.39963492309942,1.2407488491048593,1072,42,215,19,34,363,148,276,0.165,0.73,0.10400000000000001,-0.9613,0,1,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,3,3,2,10,20,10,6,11,0,19,12,9,0,4,38,41,20,0,1,6,0,10,1,0,1,1,1,0,2,20,12,0,3,9,2,0,3,7,17,0,1,4,11,36,3,24,36,3,29,3,0,0,4,10,11,2,3,14,138,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869102792841902,0.11531117887537598,0.09261135262267316,0.1001850241779147,0.0,0.2560624359271265,0.10573563016752252,0.0,0.09396672848760834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810445208090607,0.0,0.0,0.2500145476035265,0.0,0.0,0.11491657001707647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257939861619245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13189678478105565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401325873125113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017994464425062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182798813650972,0.1266395013049505,0.284519629857445,0.0803990513504263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572700571057956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040420025921618,0.0,0.0,0.12791887149947698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19903862178706275,0.0,0.0,0.3333317298736985,0.11549915836308858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12704467718888515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061849389203894815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949077795104023,0.054981669080365385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136339585184504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679827477971724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809246391394468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26408437131330703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826614063369644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133783784255613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257108900164578,0.0,0.07209641184897539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549731994642263,0.0,0.0,0.08949682913378856,0.11267280741404638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12713888289796813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262190940770425,0.0,0.0953553139019324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965683992341661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461655084397829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14953399295784586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637938170611166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DrWh0O00,2020/02/01,"My friend So I have an online friend, he's super nice, and he can be very supportive and fun to talk to, but it can be kinda hard sometimes, cause he has manic schizoaffective disorder, and he has episodes which are kinda hard, like it only happens on occasion, and generally not for that long, cause I am decent at getting him to calm down, but its kinda distressing. And I don't really know what to, he says i'm kinda his only friend, and he can get pretty depressed, and seems like a pretty vulnerable person, and I don't what to do. I can get kinda depressed to, and when that happens it can be hard for me to engage with someone unless they're pretty enjoyable to talk to, but I feel like I am getting more stressed out, and its hard to play doctor, idk. He has his own therapist, councillor and psychiatrist he sees I think, but schizoaffectve isn't curable at the moment i'm pretty sure, and I feel like I might eventually get stressed out and cut him of..",5.3099206349206325,5.871152862433868,6.0985317460317505,79.39160714285715,67.994708994709,9.051322751322752,28.97751322751323,9.075114841892004,2.2789291005291004,757,25,146,13,12,249,98,189,0.145,0.5920000000000001,0.263,0.9826,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,1,2,22,1,3,3,0,20,1,0,2,1,37,36,20,0,0,6,0,6,4,3,1,1,1,0,1,10,16,0,0,5,1,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,8,16,16,21,32,2,9,0,2,1,0,19,6,0,7,7,92,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22538833757685434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889723369661503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12572799165259266,0.11228464146812303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093725079699096,0.15674225585017235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.254266470151115,0.0,0.2865738258665158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19401822568922675,0.0,0.3930857633090616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06028934809516485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21437941610783567,0.0,0.0,0.0970828144177852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637648178715886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166866622773075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578755158119286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4464254744058287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027790777441542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723943040525109,0.0,0.0,0.08741828771718373,0.09986857712009864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295014528931342,0.0,0.10849807920425683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513265317499357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448852513370713,0.10339283304357114,0.0,0.0,0.17634861803628504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737247273930394,0.0,0.07029260952102295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051563569542173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,freakalicious_mn,2020/02/01,"I don't even know what to title this as... Hi all. I've lurked on here for a long time. Just reading everyone's story and thinking to myself, I know how they feel. I thought maybe it's my time and maybe someone our there can relate.

So last month, I was released from an IRTS (intensive rehabilitation treatment service). I was 4 hours away from home. I did that on purpose. So the program was DBT based and I actually loved it. It was all females so of course there was drama but otherwise I learned a lot from them. I was actually told by a lot of the staff that I was their favorite. Made me feel good. 

So I get home, everyone telling me they are so proud of me, if I need anything let them know. Well, I have reached out every day this week. Just to have company. Nothing. Nada. Zip. I get they have families, lives, jobs... But is it really that hard to maybe take 30 mins to come over and just hang? I went from living with 7 other females to it just being me. 

I am sinking back into my depression. I am reverting back to what and who I was before I went to the program. I freaking hate borderline. My case manager has been trying to get me into groups here and trying to motivate me but I am continually finding reasons I can't go. The only thing I do religiously is my therapist because he actually wants to help me and I have a good rapport with him. 

I don't think I'm asking for advice or anything. I think I just finally needed to vent and get some of my shit out. I just feel lost. 

Thanks for reading...",0.5326847662141779,2.9484817908496765,2.740588235294119,89.38880090497737,88.93464052287581,5.752840623428859,22.55203619909502,7.2200825789825185,0.990798491704374,1172,45,245,20,39,396,164,306,0.077,0.81,0.113,0.8756,1,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,1,0,6,3,20,11,2,0,9,0,28,2,1,4,2,50,58,20,0,4,11,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,15,15,0,0,14,3,0,5,3,5,1,0,16,4,49,6,35,40,5,26,0,2,0,1,17,8,1,5,13,174,64,10,0.0,0.0,0.29646441486182423,0.0,0.0,0.0989564272409505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16666736073073007,0.0,0.09467048404578354,0.0,0.09514318664052827,0.15573533675623952,0.0,0.06173110316687691,0.0,0.08617031149662231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723210136471275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530849873270772,0.0,0.08722066642899702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688555159295834,0.0,0.08532137267567523,0.1935289128591626,0.0,0.0,0.09546502003366644,0.0,0.15361011725299592,0.0,0.0,0.1109324733674887,0.0925557234456422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21163021402576712,0.0,0.057552071362500776,0.16987502915200742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071487073186983,0.0999796786833253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787678350799997,0.0,0.2031570621414528,0.0,0.09972707918119957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049135064737696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16696021874477807,0.08254569288551758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355183158084542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17884030521797925,0.08961764360080526,0.0,0.0,0.11054431979078466,0.17218627124322064,0.0913969472885209,0.09582078705466064,0.0,0.0,0.3052073554761548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082993411261112,0.0,0.0,0.15017561596491993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716791382159934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701771739019495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20258775805737567,0.0,0.06487389688595624,0.10411880208668828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039485812284429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580275554573064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613978634327187,0.0,0.08851136254778097,0.0932325644917369,0.0,0.11757818245134302,0.06727694618432294,0.1946624044308166,0.0,0.0803942694816193,0.11809859173469947,0.0,0.0,0.0967644564295813,0.0,0.1375065782783229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05972959060953624,0.0,0.08122985785106418,0.0,0.09105072253400599,0.18775007352277615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,manolo_chomsky,2020/02/01,"Finding a therapist and medication has been SO goddamn hard and it's getting to me. I'm a grad student with ADHD and C-PTSD.  Up until December, I was on my parents insurance plan, which was an HMO.  In other words, in the town I came from (2.5hrs from my university), it's excellent and covers everything, but I'm SOL if I need anything where I live now.  In other words, if I want to see a psychiatrist, it's gotta be in my hometown, and during the week when I have class.  So that means, more or less, that I couldn't see a psychiatrist.

I've been seeing a LMHC all of last semester.  She was fantastic. Unfortunately, at the start of this semester, she canceled my sessions 5 times in a row.  The previous semester, she'd canceled on me around 4 times, but it was more spread-out, and I was more willing to look past it since she was so good when I actually got in to see her.

Meanwhile, I can't get medication for my ADHD because my GP is scared to prescribe me anything due to my co-occurring anxiety disorder.  He referred me to a psychiatrist, but every psychiatrist in my current town is booked for like 2 months out.  My semester is 3 months long

Right now, I'm really overwhelmed by ADHD symptoms.  I've gotten really good at managing them over time, but right now none of my coping strategies are working.  I'm feeling very impulsive, very short of attention, and very distractable.  I'm not retaining much of anything when I try and study.  I'm not allowed to get less than a B on any of my classes (I'll have to retake), and I have a crazy course load plus intense clinic days.

I see the thing that I think would help me, but I don't think I can get it when I need it.  I don't know what to do.  I don't know why when I get to see a doctor it ends up being so bad.",5.547797783933519,4.971853551246539,6.877754847645433,77.90150761772857,67.50415512465375,10.433296398891967,33.0084487534626,10.008157457239328,3.019691301939058,1376,54,289,29,20,472,182,361,0.086,0.826,0.08900000000000001,0.0352,3,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,0,0,1,3,14,8,0,3,16,0,28,5,0,1,1,43,60,28,0,7,10,1,2,1,0,3,5,0,0,0,17,14,0,1,9,1,0,1,8,4,0,0,11,9,42,4,43,42,8,47,0,1,7,0,9,23,0,3,24,185,59,10,0.0,0.0,0.09434228943966863,0.0,0.3485589912934165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574331510363292,0.0,0.07395723530183937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23866949350699385,0.08606255532893455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807208146716853,0.05893307908587194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057212732318153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06234832561455667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107996108263526,0.0989524640687921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562665774832584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145409600113436,0.0,0.08688657793235792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04888252827745939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836054257651592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525473282573836,0.0,0.0,0.16217527330860662,0.07732100500627376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08660312835579614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480020031001088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626171973504232,0.0788042266775907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04723124015923762,0.0,0.08536709462862711,0.08555563414343142,0.08118388661168267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053090180308864,0.0,0.1947827462555328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543324727791456,0.0,0.07106832953984682,0.14336875575518593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734777957878508,0.0,0.092288630243531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130096204884228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386684506361413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651223551168181,0.0,0.0,0.0967900122968218,0.0,0.4622317813649899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799717754078935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842810339659908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048386958783304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224883356525056,0.06422755121382746,0.1238927573172208,0.0,0.0,0.16911848216489425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656369774455306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393046387744275,0.057022287089910736,0.0,0.07754803318401624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723547754487458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038162192043268,0.0,0.0,0.06867619084533835,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KaiTherminate,2020/02/01,"Why do people hate me so much ? I really don’t understand why people hate me so much - i am nice person.
I can’t get friends or girlfriend it’s not cool, because everyone can get friends, relationships why not me?
I am good looking too, and girls even said that to me, but they don’t give me a chance to be my girlfriend or even be my female friend. 
I’m alone all the time, i walk alone somewhere and i see teenagers (same age as me) and they are hanging out with friends - partying, doing some stuff.
When i tried to make friends - i got ignored, why ? 
I’m just feeling like everything in this world is not real i am the only person here i feel like that.",2.0309147869674185,3.899626421052631,3.105432330827071,92.5388001253133,78.02255639097744,6.237844611528822,24.6171679197995,7.1686216300943375,0.8773062656641604,506,18,111,6,12,162,82,133,0.10800000000000001,0.6659999999999999,0.22699999999999998,0.9617,0,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,0,8,13,2,0,3,1,13,0,0,1,1,21,28,10,0,0,7,0,2,2,7,0,0,1,0,3,5,5,0,1,3,0,0,2,6,3,0,0,2,6,20,10,7,24,5,8,0,0,2,0,15,3,0,3,5,70,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25931386389729544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631339498021457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653708829205484,0.0,0.0,0.11962242378196575,0.11251083165991886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265975491500682,0.17886855223406156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4835993879560371,0.0,0.13081104406183233,0.12009166152792244,0.0,0.10500168903435833,0.10012421693957403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471943094465696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232098989517592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512632465714017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356390968616291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18405505318518306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521105546719227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17357908424591462,0.21861852862129288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249126176496607,0.0801985881182197,0.0,0.0,0.13440497739475196,0.0,0.0,0.11908238107036408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975856528248443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14331021914357608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299808374794334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499438113202228,0.0,0.0,0.1303250412469264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4518505095903324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marobo17,2020/02/01,Looking for some guidance So I’ve gone to my parents about anxiety and asked to see a doctor. They insisted than medication from a doctor will not fix my problem and that I should talk to them about my anxiety to cure it. I denied them and said I wanted to get a prescription from a doctor and see how I improve.  I have not seen a doctor because they insisted it wouldn’t help. I am now 18 and can see a doctor on my own but I’m not sure how I would pay for it or what to do. Any thoughts?,2.2679285714285733,3.336384971428572,4.250654761904766,87.96455357142858,75.47619047619048,7.5357142857142865,25.505952380952376,8.07648339933343,1.3527380952380952,382,13,86,6,8,131,61,105,0.091,0.852,0.057,-0.3103,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,4,0,6,2,0,0,6,0,8,6,0,2,1,20,20,10,0,5,5,1,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,4,1,0,0,4,6,15,1,14,12,2,3,0,0,5,0,9,1,0,2,1,64,20,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197854426394057,0.0,0.2294393333216788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401931843618842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141476368654856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7674566015691899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834837307135536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10051562026055323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592937489230327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106981507975484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16651381625880224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14349231440622134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14264714245253005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35849822983390234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14133635951762225,0.0,0.0,0.12053287904737416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905219199708562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845081540021481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106527910205933,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hovlivia,2020/02/01,"Was he an adult? So I wanna know if the guy who raped me was an adult or teenager. This guy told me that he was 16 at the time and I was 15. I barley knew him. He had a lot of facial hair that he shaved, he was 6’2”, he seemed to know what he wanted (to rape me), he seemed off and I had a bad feeling about him. My family saw him once too and didn’t believe me that he was only 16. What are some symptoms of an adult vs teenager? How likely was it that he lied about his age? Feel free to ask me any questions.",-0.3829186602870821,1.1500969122806983,1.7009409888357254,101.32643540669856,84.26315789473685,4.496331738437002,15.626794258373206,4.851557810540192,-1.1869368421052635,384,6,101,1,11,128,68,114,0.131,0.83,0.039,-0.9207,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,2,0,7,0,11,5,2,1,0,19,22,7,0,3,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,5,9,3,0,0,8,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,13,4,14,3,10,9,2,4,0,0,1,2,23,2,0,7,3,61,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510466261998501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20764865459610093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854577412325785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25024888494970954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093913765286547,0.0,0.22461723948024645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4398598992213792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441384988705145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085147511354122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18883524217686992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365464937490345,0.0,0.16892937178183776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24882096699066736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4044124753836987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308637686557609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951773686688342,0.0,0.0,0.2122415385624142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100988396391858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MidnightPrincess-x,2020/02/02,"Should I ask for a new Therapist? I don’t want to go into too much detail but I’ve recently had my first session with a new counsellor. I was referred for talking therapy at the beginning of last year. I hadn’t received any documentation or had any correspondence from them until last week, despite repeatedly chasing them up. 

Prior to this appointment, I’d filled in two forms, to summarise how I’d been feeling for the last two weeks & to determine if I had a good support network. First of all, she forcefully suggested I change the answers on the first form (about my feelings). I had considered all of my answers very carefully & I was confident that it truly represented my feelings. She picked up on my answer to the last statement. “I feel like I would be better off dead or hurting myself in some way.” I had chosen “nearly every day.” I explained that I often struggle with suicidal thoughts (roughly every 2-3 days) & I have considered how I would do so. She replied that, as I hadn’t made any plans to take my life & there were preventative factors (such as me not wanting to leave family behind), I was not considered suicidal. 

She didn’t even glance at the second form. She handed me a third form entitled “How to keep myself safe if I’m feeling suicidal.” She could tell I was finding it difficult to fill in, but she just sat & waited whilst I contemplated my answers. She didn’t offer any help, nor did she talk. There was complete silence, which was very uncomfortable. 

I didn’t want to disclose too much at the first appointment as it takes me a while to learn to trust anybody & I wanted to try to summarise my mental health issues. Whilst I was enclosing some of the minor issues, she kept sighing (I imagine this was out of sympathy). I mentioned how my family can be rather toxic & are very negative. I didn’t mention the verbal or physical abuse at home, or the constant worry I’m at risk. I would not feel comfortable talking about the more-in-depth struggles I face. I mentioned how I come from a broken family & it was established that I have very low self-esteem. On multiple occasions, she told me I was “too sensitive,” & “it’s all in (your) head.” 

At the end of the session, she demonstrated a couple of mindfulness techniques (such as slow breathing through the nose & stretches I could try). She gave me another form to fill in, which asked me to “rate” my session. These questions were included:

“Have you been informed of the different talking therapies we offer?” 
“Have you been offered the talking therapy you feel is best for yourself?” 

At no point did she explain what options I had, nor did she make any suggestions as to a potential diagnosis, or even inform me of the next stage. All she said was “I’ll see you in two weeks.” 

I don’t have any friends to talk to about any of this, but my boyfriend & colleagues are horrified. They say I need to log an official complaint before others have the same experience as me. 

I came out, in floods of tears, feeling suicidal. I can’t stop thinking about what she said. I’m constantly asking myself (& my boyfriend) “am I too sensitive?” & quoting that “it’s all in my head.” I can’t forget what she said. I am not a violent person, nor would I feel able to inflict any serious injuries on myself. I am really squeamish & hate the sight (or thought) of blood. I wanted to smash my face in with a brick. I wanted to inflict enough damage for myself to die instantly. It took my boyfriend hours to console me. 

I’m absolutely devastated that I waited nearly 12 months for this session, to feel worse than I did (which I didn’t even think was possible) & want to give up on trying to recover. What would you do if this happened to you?",5.014543904518335,6.3691958807854165,5.733601188020793,78.85612215713776,69.15427769985975,9.126518714077497,32.07295877677859,9.478462496947786,3.0331246541814485,2945,129,542,63,51,959,309,713,0.159,0.758,0.083,-0.997,1,0,0,0,1,2,119.0,1,7,3,7,24,21,2,3,30,0,63,10,8,8,5,99,119,29,6,20,18,0,12,1,1,6,2,4,1,1,27,9,0,8,28,0,0,8,20,10,1,9,46,20,105,10,96,63,17,76,0,3,3,0,63,34,0,14,33,389,132,5,0.04176539310183601,0.049485161298055295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6787917896466359,0.0,0.22721519604483076,0.043794656258983884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713501390972784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03553927336310755,0.0,0.04383020334038994,0.03693809616990408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047768483280824,0.04258260178485783,0.0,0.04418224800824618,0.035977187996591525,0.04379022004741865,0.09026710503071582,0.0,0.06669253582169754,0.046212613076708736,0.0,0.05387044677184071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334588413452183,0.043635946480632216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03699174166278537,0.04315481566751131,0.0,0.08275694473487735,0.0,0.07037829002986147,0.0,0.0,0.04085456860419925,0.11811808677484,0.0,0.21117837661939254,0.029837205177071783,0.0,0.0,0.038172812651185516,0.14210248814624302,0.0,0.0,0.032267839106941434,0.0,0.0,0.04006517076713654,0.023736235383635132,0.0350308301881658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03693299918762469,0.0,0.0,0.04123467897202196,0.08572668527737069,0.04439465982942178,0.0,0.0,0.027994462619458413,0.0,0.04189409462314598,0.0,0.04113049920753563,0.0,0.044710717127921705,0.0,0.0,0.0871844388170602,0.0,0.03712300039280757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13617747892302895,0.0,0.04422352084814663,0.0,0.0,0.029500132297240907,0.020404461418064075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03951942479791529,0.02787872420906801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04208969292135623,0.0,0.042171141057622576,0.0,0.033336738308792815,0.0,0.06140473903514265,0.030968509777636995,0.0,0.08067455382878122,0.044417969381856805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03646793029021286,0.0,0.0,0.039481796249305805,0.04708420535669288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04678679873329815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026755980285047748,0.0,0.0412382870734963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918535905589205,0.033213516934712264,0.0,0.0,0.03328161091848974,0.0,0.043570413698993324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03491773876364163,0.0,0.08732451421818223,0.0,0.1827382450232172,0.04739487314966307,0.0,0.0,0.0628047556905538,0.2014166455816992,0.03650479445522265,0.0,0.14328710070615194,0.0484928404586237,0.0,0.05352315497399407,0.0,0.06631411376635436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03990862292540509,0.04640288848424783,0.0850678810912228,0.0,0.12239616093455938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378432933393008,0.17244017668839598,0.03315142502520735,0.10050503728984994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042414784035340485,0.04256250368812642,0.14834468475937754,0.0,0.0,0.02689554382538121
mentalhealth,katjade14,2020/02/02,Can someone help md I attempted suicide and everyone looked past it like it was nothing I’m so sad can someone let me know they care and treat me like a human even if they don’t mean it I hate having to do this but I need a reason to go on I’m shaking I’m so upset I can’t do thisssss,-1.3195454545454552,0.5687169696969718,1.7517424242424262,97.19761363636366,91.42424242424244,4.512121212121213,20.37121212121212,5.985473137389443,-0.06211515151515101,224,8,55,2,8,79,44,66,0.19899999999999998,0.664,0.13699999999999998,-0.7339,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,2,1,3,8,1,2,2,0,9,0,0,1,0,8,19,6,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,1,1,8,4,3,17,0,4,0,1,1,0,4,1,0,1,3,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25619994178220823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597016570500278,0.0,0.0,0.24011184008330605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14281001790685713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480901097921333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684298138842198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809866013041724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569540691107769,0.0,0.24552853082191176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110145778406008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737210413303608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863232886097083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411129814152285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239878221690406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25836095275849275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4258228336826637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27486300609853315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rafaella_Geo,2020/02/02,"Sleep disturbance and mental health Hello all, I'm a psychology undergraduate carrying out a study in need of participants. If you have some spare time I would appreciate if you could complete the survey below!

This is a study looking into the effect of sleep disturbances on mental health (inc. Suicide behaviours). Participants will be asked to answer a series of questionnaires. This should take no longer than 30 minutes. Further information regarding confidentiality and more can be found in the information sheet.

[https://chester.onlinesurveys.ac.uk/sleep-disturbances-study-part-1?fbclid=IwAR2Jy90GLsr4pOfJLPaaDw\_FH\_bzRt1rOZOgNrI-5upC37HoZrBEJ4aBXUw](https://chester.onlinesurveys.ac.uk/sleep-disturbances-study-part-1?fbclid=IwAR2Jy90GLsr4pOfJLPaaDw_FH_bzRt1rOZOgNrI-5upC37HoZrBEJ4aBXUw)

Thanks for your time!",15.657783701447071,21.840970970297032,9.170693069306935,43.151210967250606,57.118811881188115,11.424523990860624,33.51180502665651,10.389873798559362,5.64926290936786,712,26,66,21,13,186,72,101,0.133,0.8079999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.7932,0,0,0,0,0,1,45.0,0,3,0,1,0,3,0,2,7,0,9,4,2,1,1,17,16,4,1,6,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,4,1,12,9,3,9,0,0,1,0,7,7,0,3,2,42,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001064208988754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824172740441,0.0,0.0,0.12811613437284286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17593869110778887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3411279618666076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13474796561300312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32341662751829753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189808038070624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3475301893402003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6423129602164369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755197734349402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206477219702118,0.0,0.0,0.14773217866223862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871337804448756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398785385483146,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LovecStrasidel50,2020/02/02,"My mood swings are like January of 2020 for no reason. Need help. What can I do ? \*Cant post on r/needadvice cuz of karma\*

Hello, I’d like some help with answering my questions on what the f is happening with me for some last weeks.

I was always on this neutral mood, somewhere between happy-sad-angry, rarely getting some other feels. Month ago, somehing just gave a stop to this.

\*Side note, this is like the fourth time I’m asking for help on Reddit, everytime I asked for help, I got told to fuck off and that it’s my bussiness and me being a retard. Please, if you dont like me or this post, then dont comment, I will really appreciate that and I dont want to hear any negative thoughts on myself in fear it will just destroy my mood just like basically everything at the moment.\*

Yeah, neutral mood... For lets say, last 4 weeks, I just can't stop being sad, and I mean, I don't have a single reason to be sad. It was really confusing to me at the beginning, and I didn't know why. Yet, I'm still confused, but I do not even care why, I'm just ok with it. I was always a very active person, jumping around, talkative, extroverted af, but maaan, fuck. I just lie in bed barely moving, I can stare at one point for half a hour a somehow stay entertained by it. Even if I am hungry or thirsty, I can't get up, like wtf why would I do that? I just can't do anything. Food tastes bad, I can't do homework, I'm not entertained by ANYTHING, not even gaming can solve it, but guess what, staring blankly is a fun town party.

I am still being humorous and trying to keep optimistic about it, but I can't escape that sad mood, I cannot, I'm aware of it, but I cannot solve it, It's generated from thin air or somethin.

My mood swings are like rollercoaster. Sad, Angry, Sad, Happy for 10 min, Angry... and again, again

I just want my mood to be ok again, what can I do ?

This weekend, I have done some philosophy stuff, just because phone was my only friend and there were some juicy ytb videos.

Guess what? Gold mine, I was enthusiastic, happy, just like before, but even more. It was a really great time, but fast forward 2 days... ""Imma kms mood again.""

I'm sorry if this post is somehow scattered around, but I just type what I think about and I am really sleepy and want to get it done quickly.

I want go visit some psycho..something person to tell me what could it be or some tips on how to deal with it.

I struggle with some more personal stuff too and I do not want to talk about it here, but it's nothing serious, it's just that I have no one to talk to, I feel left out, maybe that's the main reason ? I get way more happy when someone talks to me. I just miss someone who would care for me for the most part I guess, but I'm not sure, still.

Do you have some experience with people just being sad and able to do nothing ? Please help, I am afraid of it getting even worse and I do not want that.",2.4636111111111134,3.9121890016835046,3.7975294612794603,89.87740530303032,75.64983164983164,6.835521885521885,22.30765993265993,7.492282038375204,0.6915074074074075,2233,59,491,28,48,733,250,594,0.12300000000000001,0.696,0.18100000000000002,0.991,0,0,2,0,0,0,112.0,0,2,0,0,40,47,3,5,14,3,63,4,0,5,1,103,106,34,0,13,37,0,3,8,1,4,0,2,2,3,42,22,2,3,11,5,0,5,22,17,0,3,14,8,58,22,57,79,16,60,1,7,2,2,29,23,2,25,37,329,100,2,0.06524705429716504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783757685245354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858155201556664,0.0,0.0,0.044370234338900416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738553255449083,0.1161674230065832,0.12199437612590028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0544785649668541,0.039773998698288834,0.0,0.055520437534264055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13304744068835486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520944636551575,0.0,0.0,0.0420789522675451,0.06726684799183716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354077967879385,0.2294071851047201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154753200182641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058639845247944,0.06382413903074842,0.0,0.07342107584517599,0.06598174221454632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889699704706324,0.0,0.05040971229767354,0.12063970064140635,0.17044446448706846,0.0,0.03708140457603522,0.0,0.052184029753286315,0.07193510770496082,0.2156309589788152,0.0,0.05769775463327715,0.2083701076901307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353817220437096,0.0,0.21866862573256424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425520546448796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05799457978037601,0.0,0.0,0.03585807468383844,0.10637011532104224,0.0,0.0,0.07089111540417413,0.06671953364202841,0.0,0.2550113197886429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655494358416626,0.07107316995902012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207957624678905,0.0693472928891051,0.0,0.04837986401892483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521261664183084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842618519759303,0.049623324937864866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065620152480462,0.0,0.04523409207935992,0.17091363334823834,0.0,0.14324334459122473,0.06167955602253911,0.0,0.1874659261950521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309163330268857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671957349162979,0.20125451609710046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05188707640210661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105672347425876,0.05023037008061878,0.0,0.07303873543066261,0.0,0.06954467848396348,0.1563191455343159,0.10909891792424654,0.0,0.06821038780569776,0.1493845338985614,0.0,0.0,0.061494576507908,0.0,0.0,0.15732933218871412,0.057028801336052926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04180767783304129,0.0,0.05179887294526022,0.0760921641271768,0.0,0.0,0.06234635648202538,0.0,0.04429846693864667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0538356530194734,0.2309064187041201,0.0517900747006979,0.1046745026310816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766259539192942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649232254060577,0.0926992706865287,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MyThrowAway540,2020/02/02,"i dont know what to do anymore I cant find a job or apprenticeship here in my area and i dont know why,all my relationships have fallen apart or just died out.

I work with a social worker too whos supposed to help get set up since my school years were lets just say not exactly nice (the the bad grades kind) but she actively refuse to  help me out and yells at me everytime i try to call

I just dont know what to do anymore i got no one other than my mother,no kinds of relationships not even friends and i cant take my life anywhere  i really do have no idea as to what im supposed to do other than waste away in my bed honestly i cant do anything other than give up",1.0452747252747263,2.5821016802721104,3.1887074829931983,92.34136577708006,79.81632653061223,6.6999476713762425,20.831501831501832,7.61054688173877,0.501088330716903,525,14,126,8,13,179,85,147,0.158,0.758,0.084,-0.8421,2,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,6,6,0,0,4,0,15,1,0,0,1,21,23,7,1,0,8,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,6,6,0,1,5,0,0,1,10,1,0,1,2,2,19,5,21,20,0,13,0,0,0,0,12,10,0,2,1,82,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832674972412277,0.0,0.0,0.1175242811024769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341790565675551,0.0,0.11924426002125102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582971628807573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482190500301726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5021330875366148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432772358836193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305299947413539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033823751557148,0.0,0.0746147555643022,0.13700081723957966,0.0,0.0,0.11422191492458658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19145128717107784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612203464444876,0.1542643195995696,0.0,0.14172149471941986,0.0,0.0,0.29743894377845964,0.2354615756158003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603764660370902,0.10087420460248724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677489694161788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149071612354948,0.0,0.0,0.3066589554990363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357193483344802,0.0,0.1445360413930525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813774699730548,0.0,0.0,0.14558154162031275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737883667272036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696176676806116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397075969974512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196794656376556
mentalhealth,Herobrineisgood,2020/02/02,"I tell my self I’m not a bad guy everyday in the mirror. Okay, for background I’m a guy who’s 16 years old, and I live in Ohio, USA. 

Every morning I wake up and just look in the mirror, and tell my self I’m not a bad guy. I don’t know why, I say the most offensive crap, laugh at videos of people dying online. I lie to my parents and people for personal gain, and I have stopped caring for what people say or think about me. 

In elementary and middle school I was bullied a lot, and I would get called names, get slapped, and humiliated at school. When I got home everyday, I wouldnt tell my parents, all they would do is call the school and complain but, that never really fix anything, just make the bullying worse. Home life wasn’t great either, parents were arguing, it would just be a constant argument everyday, yelling, hitting, and I’d cry and tell my parents to stop but then they’d get mad at me. Over the years I thought of horrible things to do to these people, these bullies, my mom always taught me to never hit anyone, and tell the teachers. But you know what they say in school, snitches get stitches, so I kept my mouth shut.

I have ADHD, and back then it was severe, I would crazy and weird things, and people would laugh at me, medicine never worked, and even had teachers ask me out loud in class if I took my ‘focus medicine’ yet. So I would do outlandish things, just to get people to like me. But as I grew older I realized they were laughing at me, not with me. I feel like all this just built up a shell, it’s hard for me to feel anything, love, empathy, remorse. My friends will tell me sad things happening with them but I have to pretend to feel bad for them, cause otherwise I wouldn’t react in no way. 

I say horrible things and make fun of all groups of people, obviously in a joking way, but these, emotions, and the way I perceive stuff ruins relationships I have with people. I watch shock videos and I don’t feel bad for the people getting hurt or killed in them. I don’t feel anything, I actively search for these just for the ‘shock factor’ of the video. I need help, I don’t know what to do.",4.653636206299758,5.000358593457946,5.149231568016617,86.37901523018347,69.37383177570094,8.209899619245414,27.76773970231914,8.045849151850463,1.5281399100034614,1650,51,353,20,27,528,188,428,0.183,0.6829999999999999,0.134,-0.9716,4,0,0,0,1,0,61.0,0,1,7,2,13,28,5,0,18,1,30,5,3,4,7,80,63,34,2,10,19,5,6,2,1,9,1,6,2,6,19,23,0,3,12,5,0,2,14,16,0,0,11,14,58,12,47,39,6,43,0,3,2,1,41,20,1,5,20,226,77,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553148290091137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05229484767350755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04394501568182752,0.0,0.15515646893140272,0.0,0.05875470738909615,0.0,0.0,0.04832648862780763,0.20990293128280094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835034957469302,0.0,0.06407806404489473,0.06456255029013254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791672061900947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903594259425863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522664711018547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069591539293989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041510731164129816,0.0,0.05295243112067508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15889002755494164,0.04489886160354194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0485564661204004,0.0,0.1970139599227528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05026555314933536,0.06929050893044843,0.0,0.18668919180732368,0.0555765732510081,0.0,0.056299761635454325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042125912777597,0.0,0.12608400453912236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728044026269221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953236863285739,0.0,0.10361940045880466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04439163619512925,0.06140904175626141,0.0,0.05549622941284101,0.0,0.05277677090485363,0.0,0.0,0.05343140518021653,0.05672307423290144,0.0,0.08390350051338842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360720794123345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04660124251994427,0.14541752649946155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06594875318345854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27914254448414066,0.0,0.0,0.3921400864007492,0.05487674014207297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04026225139908872,0.0,0.0,0.06747558923580296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19991806757617955,0.0,0.254423472953811,0.0,0.0,0.13112903591811256,0.07100072714520317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508804098462401,0.0,0.0,0.07194630487399213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295932788041994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087681988179248,0.04027067403767691,0.0,0.04989455612024055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982681037632298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965824399439204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05671084503730589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04575433489374437,0.0,0.06404782053990546,0.26787391504418423,0.0,0.0,0.0809445316879575
mentalhealth,CharthBaeder,2020/02/02,"Conflict between Actions and Words - Drunk Words are Sober Thoughts? Hey, I have been struggling with my mental health my entire life. I have unresolved trauma which is causing me to be angry and lash out at my friends and loved ones. It is to the point where I think i may lose all my friends and my boyfriend - my actions absolutely disgust me. My actions are, when drunk are becoming hateful and mean to almost anything, shutting down, and saying untrue things that come out of nowhere. On top of that, to be completely honest, I have a problem with alcohol as well. I have been using it to cope since a young age. I hide it pretty well but it's obvious in a social setting. I lose complete control and turn into this hateful and mean individual. The other 95% of the time, I have people magnetize towards me because I am a happy, genuine, and joy-filled individual. What makes me happiest in life is cheering up the whole world. Yet, drunk me is a completely different person. I have never had to come face-to-face with my problems because I was never in love. I have now met the love of my life, we are perfect together in absolutely every way. I could not ask for a better individual. He is so kind and patient that he never gets 'mad' about when I behave in this manner, but instead, he just says everything is fine. Everything is not fine to me. I am a 24 y/o who just moved back home after 4.5 years of University. When I first moved away for school, I was so excited to leave my home town,  I never planned on moving home. I then met the love of my life over the summer and everything changed for me. Summer was magical with him. When I went back for my final semester of school, I became incredibly confused because I missed him but also loved the city I was in. Now, I moved home and absolutely hate it. I am living with my parents, broke, and unhappy in every way. It seems like I am actively ruining the whole reason I came back. I am deeply in love with this man and he is sticking by me through this, yet I can't keep getting mad at him. I am going to open up to him about the trauma I did experience. I am tied to the hometown now because I also found a proper job and got re-hired at my summer serving gig which I will work at for the weekends to pay debt. I have all of these jobs lined up, yet, I feel like I no longer can live the reinvented life I had created for myself far away from my history and past transgressions and trauma. 

I know it's lengthy, but please, anyone, Thoughts?",4.294973867595819,5.434550071138212,5.337814169570269,81.83041463414635,70.64634146341461,8.224483159117305,29.50429732868757,8.591530228387361,2.1851916840882697,1953,76,384,32,35,644,236,492,0.17600000000000002,0.6920000000000001,0.132,-0.9605,5,0,1,0,0,0,64.0,1,0,0,9,25,39,6,2,21,0,43,16,0,5,8,72,77,31,0,3,8,1,1,2,2,2,7,2,4,2,21,31,4,3,10,4,2,12,8,18,2,2,17,3,69,21,65,55,4,78,0,5,0,6,28,33,0,5,32,277,90,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181053263201696,0.06728562982948008,0.0,0.0,0.10747090551188304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046983987687020105,0.0,0.05529538456734929,0.0,0.0628178282722816,0.0,0.1262629724544761,0.15500537055797034,0.0,0.1638446819779658,0.0742110949112878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05942811387791249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685265778534951,0.0,0.06902730652861278,0.07108291813251416,0.11576430011087167,0.21135660363328354,0.0,0.07536439503874601,0.053649375909739686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702039971062277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322860320654753,0.0,0.18117037091432545,0.06572915789367402,0.0,0.0,0.03397558054038318,0.04800379583467489,0.0,0.07360833877693397,0.0,0.057155645008379226,0.0,0.07367534949844813,0.10382867640070106,0.0,0.07021275203086351,0.0,0.038188207993267234,0.0,0.0537416153710976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152984182618938,0.0,0.199022103337183,0.0,0.0714246583738026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26960642634363746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336043374963,0.05972559832769767,0.0,0.06997277765602719,0.03692836422786186,0.0,0.0,0.07114932022910267,0.0,0.0,0.2373074688947172,0.06565572038107195,0.0,0.11866802725876426,0.0,0.0,0.15034701462259975,0.0,0.0,0.36387419778721136,0.0,0.0448528800576706,0.0,0.0,0.14638911487673176,0.0,0.0,0.0677162962734043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856686659955339,0.0,0.0,0.20729829973574504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04553276218883057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461158944579599,0.0,0.06414479570293816,0.04658423639727983,0.058671684220269124,0.0,0.07375943143799088,0.06352056350754735,0.0,0.0,0.06836100837179483,0.0,0.12859220804193314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908718271931727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687159715016688,0.0,0.13600893224272975,0.0,0.061171389429986026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055584021368657775,0.0,0.0,0.06849637584920397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024632714449125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04464106943877569,0.04305555075536447,0.0,0.10668992485407744,0.03918167911342301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308836873936066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05803451187506059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667180314605892,0.0,0.0,0.12083193003306697,0.0622900157083716,0.0,0.1500406179878719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0489184284934605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043271083434057
mentalhealth,ayonikki96,2020/02/02,"Personal Mental Health Blog Hi guys, I started a personal blog more so for a hobby and to have a place to write down my thoughts in hopes that maybe someone else would relate to my experiences. It's my first blog, so it's still a work-in-progress, but just wanted to create a space where people could hear my stories, feel connected, and share theirs with me if they wanted to. I'm a 23 year old graduate student studying Clinical Psychology and mental health awareness is a big thing to me. I've been through many different struggles some relatable some not so relatable, but it helps to have a space where I can put it all. If you wanted to check it out, give me feedback, or just chat feel free to visit it :) If this is considered a spam post or anything, feel free to delete it lol

[https://astepintomyworld.com/](https://astepintomyworld.com/)",8.951112903225805,8.505520458064519,7.801088709677418,73.64163306451614,60.54838709677418,10.846774193548386,34.858870967741936,10.125756701596842,3.254822580645161,681,24,124,12,8,208,97,155,0.04,0.792,0.168,0.9676,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,2,1,8,5,0,1,9,1,8,3,0,0,1,29,20,13,0,9,10,0,3,0,0,1,3,1,0,3,10,5,0,0,4,4,3,2,1,1,0,1,2,4,12,6,16,16,4,17,0,0,0,0,14,9,0,8,5,79,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251554460429532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857088022781646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682440764762024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452150117658726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575201117202298,0.0,0.0,0.24426772290943505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697366398220934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544764855179684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944691249077642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3423387892728029,0.18149467078205847,0.0,0.10793629770237337,0.0,0.0,0.15994102549194494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16326108607248493,0.1617782020060201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245645888700308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16897590550241298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163925351928693,0.281213712433103,0.1682440764762024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422406050138554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16188155111591604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644181836012334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113979217719842,0.0,0.12860029471876114,0.0,0.0,0.16834552053193155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698244843911578,0.0,0.0,0.12784135246052375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28494238562049473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723315144144855,0.0,0.0,0.11439245163879964,0.0,0.0,0.10369927312645584
mentalhealth,Mattfaller72,2020/02/02,"Lowering high serotonin So I have copper toxicity, which causes high serotonin and low dopamine. Mainly due to high copper levels and low zinc levels, among other things.

Sometimes my serotonin gets so high I get the “electrical shock” sensations I’ve found high serotonin gives me. For example, Busbar causes this issue really bad. I also know it’s high serotonin because when I take my anti psychotic in the evening they go away. And only seem to come on the next evening, and get worse until I take my antipsychotic. Then it goes away.
Raising my dose of my anti psychotic ISNT an option. 
What are natural means of lowering serotonin?
I’ve read shijiat will lowering it somewhere else on Reddit but can’t find any supporting studies online.

Does anybody know anything natural that will help!? Preferably that doesn’t lower dopamine as well
Thanks so much everyone !

If this is in the wrong place please let me know where to post it.",4.446194278110448,7.522290389221556,4.703782435129742,77.86356453759149,76.24550898203594,7.543446440452428,29.038256819693945,8.515128840125781,2.8021127079174977,753,33,117,16,18,236,108,167,0.13699999999999998,0.762,0.1,0.2841,4,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,0,9,8,0,0,5,0,9,1,0,2,0,18,25,14,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,12,5,0,0,8,1,0,2,3,5,1,0,1,0,13,3,15,21,2,27,0,2,0,0,3,19,0,3,5,72,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702711481504387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740045630839934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955349838292052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20448887349273215,0.0,0.09086412226316183,0.066338558712312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22358599481511174,0.0,0.09374288780062502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952332737862406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090911616489004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375544462116965,0.0,0.0,0.10398671406804047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946385175332163,0.0,0.0,0.11932072348885127,0.0,0.0,0.1705693239495745,0.10439461828679852,0.0618476143991059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294293730302949,0.6898759519555469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135847674749126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17942171297149148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128068196875054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854205793996347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999871421778966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573635828596394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276612768713927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369870361729002,0.11945689817857973,0.0,0.0,0.104224030425715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088542014708078,0.0,0.06971592271454319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906996700107877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076304623176906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12349303887826485,0.0,0.0,0.1636453401139364,0.0,0.0,0.10019121052664336,0.0,0.0,0.07229832961787254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784652132802914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109017193930701,0.0,0.11898278265872933,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chuchule21,2020/02/02,"How do you continue when you realize yourself to be completely and absolutely alone in a place where you do not really like yourself at all? Not a reflection, but a serious question. My mental health and pattern of being over sensitive has managed to drive everyone in my life far away. No I find my self absolutely alone, with literally no one to call and talk about the absolute bat sh\*t disaster that is unfolding inside me. Has anyone else been here before? Any practical suggestions to navigate out of this?

PS: female, early 30s, I have family and all but they have too much other stuff to take care and this is not something that can be addressed there.e",5.289504132231404,7.557279314049591,6.195115702479343,72.19812809917359,69.9090909090909,10.790413223140497,31.934710743801645,10.793553405168565,4.221012561983471,531,24,88,18,10,175,89,121,0.14,0.8170000000000001,0.043,-0.9175,0,2,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,3,1,0,6,3,0,0,4,0,13,2,0,1,2,19,15,9,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,6,7,0,0,4,0,0,1,5,1,0,1,1,0,10,2,15,11,3,13,0,0,0,0,9,9,0,1,4,69,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4121624713634608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531188708519165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391300685804482,0.20387651105049828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18694641389087105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16931565240732402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20317882086950834,0.0,0.202871367929793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208624684039985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662206159849459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901320395117388,0.0,0.0,0.18757878285854948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18186231924953689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21150434663142784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14054407063917998,0.0972106171592672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20052305920247496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14627175047182167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483266614552064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20788969631688867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229009375245668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747042438023098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20757748605969265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15318301257284986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277822450605639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496067192396149,0.15993100742347402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,doud_the_doggod,2020/02/02,"ngl im not k  hey, im 20yo and just wanted to write in hope i find a solution by myself or stop thinking about it. (sry for my bad english tho)

i usually struggle with social anxiety and burnouts, maybe depression but i never went to a doctor to get a real diagnosis . i dont hate myself but i see no value in me, i draw but recently my art became shitty and messy, i had multiple projects but ended up destroyed. i often have panic attacks before sleeping, cry and then fall asleep of tiredness.

Recently, i lost one of my sketchbook which is like a part of my soul, there were a lot of memories and dear drawings in it. Another of my sketchbooks is at my best and only friend's house but since i had problems with his ex, she teared it up when she found it in his room and my friend is scared to bring it back to me due to the trauma she caused (because of her, i dont trust girls anymore or even people that seem nice at first, i always feel like they'll drop their mask and destroy me like she did). So now i kinda feel really vulnerable 'cause i thought i can forget about her after 2 years trying to forget what she did to me and my friend and maybe forgive her 'cause its useless to keep anger inside me but no. Now im writing 'cause just found out that my friend is into cocaine, and i think its not only occasionally, he used to smoke a lot of weed and now he found out coke can make u feel awake and alive. Im really worried that he gets deep into it 'cause it's not only coke but he also takes ecstasy and speed in parties. I feel shitty 'cause i thought i was bringing him a bit of support and love but guess not (i'll try to talk about it next time i see him, it's not easy since he lives in another city and rarely respond to my messages 'cause he's often busy or with people)

These last two years i cut bonds with barely all the people i know except my best friend and family and i dont feel like making new friends will bring me something good. I thought about going to a therapist, I went to three different psychologists but everytime i give too much informations about myself, i just stop seeing them, i do the same thing with people, it's pretty annoying 'cause i feel like a bad person lol. I'm just really worried about my friend who finally has his own appartement, his job and dreams, I think he suffers from depression but he's the kind of person to forget about himself, he hates taking care of himself or seeing he needs something or that people are worried about him, he thinks he doesnt matter and thats a waste of time to worry about him. For him, it's always people before himself.

But anyway, i just wanted to post that somewhere where people dont know me and thanks for taking the time to read me, yes i need therapy but its hard",6.221869047619045,5.482583639285719,6.671785714285715,80.47654761904764,66.17857142857143,9.466666666666667,29.91666666666667,8.648137234880735,2.085888095238096,2178,63,443,28,30,711,262,560,0.20199999999999999,0.618,0.18,-0.7899,2,0,4,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,3,5,29,45,8,3,15,2,23,6,2,11,2,116,76,43,0,6,28,1,7,5,7,2,1,0,1,3,25,30,2,3,22,3,0,7,13,20,0,4,15,11,78,25,64,59,10,52,1,5,4,1,58,17,0,13,31,284,103,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04210898165232794,0.08762801511689426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104288077044565,0.04028169346011587,0.0,0.05222059978115176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05990379807695075,0.0,0.040489211312582735,0.08793111584512628,0.03209860694101443,0.0,0.08961275003421555,0.0,0.11051844014257478,0.0,0.057486710770399525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368629812102805,0.4327377081681453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057840139998374965,0.0,0.0,0.09070506584887744,0.0,0.0,0.05501430944469631,0.0,0.053895643995809005,0.0,0.0,0.2468497445606427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046637584076192916,0.0,0.0,0.03477878930515035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0496393875611304,0.0,0.15974672484105898,0.1128523640002782,0.0,0.057682070738178215,0.048126627171908465,0.04478916401646387,0.0,0.17320374805528946,0.28477324780160473,0.0,0.0550211701100848,0.05051243023950824,0.0299256164645597,0.04416535190618009,0.0,0.0,0.0580065170136118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716943048070492,0.10397379095816787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05229928597551855,0.0,0.06075795062889878,0.0,0.0,0.22751004962523025,0.0,0.05225295191440201,0.046803069392157455,0.0,0.054833117790270766,0.05787671758472645,0.042921665330413514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286253015050311,0.0,0.046496209916131584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057480240729443535,0.08953249104157639,0.04752409297938792,0.0,0.07029657354822169,0.0,0.10580005255429807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03870821635723594,0.07808750891672378,0.04061155090558947,0.0508554898725446,0.0560002500132114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03568106620963155,0.12014177511062955,0.0,0.061780466928515014,0.0,0.057021313292982566,0.0,0.2555352674248581,0.09195437081599044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050429889514956576,0.053570078963264295,0.0,0.050384677632323266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05267024630489865,0.05993405227363645,0.1011983397370198,0.0,0.10398288883398024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05271783875410028,0.0,0.16784004836017025,0.047936041906148745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711516944338453,0.0,0.05269402437552187,0.053676157656756165,0.0,0.08107431782004051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804554228265321,0.0,0.055047480744334895,0.0,0.0,0.059753401217158976,0.0,0.0,0.118772269521835,0.042322895689767034,0.0,0.0484785673379769,0.06021672140712705,0.06113767079687649,0.034982304559253115,0.13495934648754224,0.0,0.12540893928743851,0.09211240562472613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149993085378747,0.0,0.05143725770132642,0.0,0.0,0.04547787485569342,0.05799314134083593,0.0,0.06211574241725014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09762527322511552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138988831133408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781747114616388
mentalhealth,keepitgoingfullsteam,2020/02/02,"My wife has bipolar and recently started hallucinating again and I don't know how to handle it. My wife has recently been signed-off work as she is having a long depressive episode. Like last time, she is starting to hallucinate several times a day and at night. She hallucinates that there are people at the house dressed all in black trying to get in. She is adamant they are there, but they are not.  She is medicated and is taking everything she has been prescribed. Lithium, quetiapine and sertraline. 

We are off to see the doctor again tomorrow to try and get some help. 

I just don't know what to do when she does hallucinate, I want to be able to reassure her and help in whatever way I can. 

Thanks,",4.344491180461328,6.342901074626868,5.187774762550879,79.56597693351425,71.83582089552239,9.35033921302578,29.34599728629579,9.800150414767053,2.9185164179104475,560,23,108,15,11,182,83,134,0.013000000000000001,0.861,0.126,0.9377,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,2,1,7,4,0,0,4,0,20,3,0,1,1,17,30,11,0,1,3,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,2,17,3,15,27,2,21,0,1,2,0,16,6,0,1,15,77,20,2,0.18827930304779675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142457450771278,0.0,0.162164687826702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927118447465985,0.1647644868889602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921329725981613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967363298016324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523992961511249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21724903685404207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20694676205182452,0.1534727612877826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198375711420943,0.0,0.0,0.16662125839315647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18967158983335936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668737152058325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052916215823393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3718061951506703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003422792555318,0.0,0.0,0.2127020208710786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665301195309701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14156260424356926,0.0,0.0,0.1733422861242776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21957435141843476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556585755828261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110520110861246,0.1494473470791525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370695750144727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kat3065,2020/02/02,"Feel horrible discomfort, stressed and thinking of stuff all the time. Thinking this might be just anxiety or is it possibly obsessive thoughts (or OCD?) over the same stuff on repeat?? I’ve been so stressed out just constantly with peaks of anxiety but after venting in the form of writing idk if it might just be me obsessing over the same thoughts and anxieties on loop sometimes going into “what if” scenarios but other times just thinking of thoughts that don’t really matter on repeat that make me stressed?? 

This probably doesn’t make sense because I’m writing this kinda late and I’m really stressed out for no reason😂 I know I’ve not explained this in depth but what are the differences for things like anxiety and OCD? Sorry if I’ve got OCD completely wrong btw",8.093164335664337,8.24261302797203,7.38964160839161,73.91984702797205,62.07692307692307,11.625524475524475,38.85402097902098,11.20814326018867,4.5300636363636375,625,30,108,16,8,194,84,143,0.231,0.738,0.031,-0.9764,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,7,5,0,9,0,0,2,1,41,24,13,0,3,13,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,14,8,0,0,9,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,5,1,3,1,18,15,4,19,0,0,0,0,3,11,0,8,8,72,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3700637234765716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372163992288469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679939920558206,0.13068916613718465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635268312238726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061149021976946175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873088061188294,0.0,0.09672379889131903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06646342225287935,0.0,0.13642140278757894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05908336258923455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145182538475605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25658858467387485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13633749601705508,0.0,0.0,0.1303897751551824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15494976831021626,0.12434264807947805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119609083189891,0.13537827550826073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5541284465932819,0.0,0.27688623670095064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034469736113854,0.23247327440718485,0.0,0.28802971674904915,0.1410378465411402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322248482700565,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crystal_lee26,2020/02/02,"If this is me, and I need help because no one understands. Where? Dear Lord. Where? So what I made plans for tomorrow? So what, what I told you today?

Cuz damn I can't make up my mind, and maybe I just don't want to stay.


FUCK, where is my passion? Jesus Christ, where is my fight?

Maybe I had hope for tomorrow, but right now I can't see the sunrise.


I can barely see the me of the future, I can hardly hear myself cry.

The tomorrow I thought would be nearer, in my head seems only a lie.


The further I reach for an answer, less is more and I'm starting to fray.

I thought the sun would be brighter and I thought this would all go away.


The clouds in my head are just darker, and the banks of my heart overflow.

You act like you get it, but quit it.  Because don't act like you actually know.


You can't stop a river that rages, so park your ass at the dam.

Maybe stop and listen a minute, instead of offering all the shit that you can.


I'm errording apart at the seams, the precipice creeps dangerously nearer, and nothing is ever the same.

I slide frighteningly close to the edges, and I fall because I've made my own cage.


Sleep, the sleep, it could come quicker. And the sun it could set everyday.

A rainbow may shine in the darkess, but a dream is just a dream anyway.


My heart will always hurt harder, and tears will fall in each frame.  

It's been a picture I tried to master, in a life that was harder to tame.


Unhappy, unhappy is unhappy.  Change my ""attitude"" was all you could say.


Step back for a second and ponder. Christ,

please shut up your goddamn face.  It would never help me, or ANYONE, so swallow that fucking cliche.",1.4293830703012915,3.6477488536585407,2.5266212338594016,94.1304304160689,81.8048780487805,5.5661406025824975,20.622668579626968,6.794906146795322,0.25579311334289834,1256,36,274,14,34,399,172,328,0.15,0.737,0.113,-0.9518,0,0,0,0,1,0,58.0,0,9,0,3,16,13,7,0,27,0,32,14,9,4,5,54,57,21,0,11,8,0,1,2,0,7,1,3,0,0,15,14,1,2,8,2,1,8,7,8,0,2,10,7,38,5,22,35,8,45,4,1,3,4,17,22,5,5,15,179,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.10319702385828998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799270890591596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394305834675742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935587419089598,0.08131544187336796,0.0,0.19339317726722466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186977993318208,0.09109450707538086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532989936648312,0.0,0.1161617228272286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09565718743454564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19552886957287635,0.05525015942334365,0.0,0.06010032419160461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947314842179119,0.0,0.2170606034937538,0.0,0.1191882573077359,0.2506291946605717,0.14176437432527186,0.0,0.0,0.10503389448436386,0.0,0.0,0.11320786766716405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05811759123003218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746945539637583,0.10332849555631028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20012695390255286,0.07058913664837115,0.0,0.3187211263734117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677764220523386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841249664426862,0.0815611393750345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014702509127252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165913020507317,0.08042785731364803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608205712070167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247844555007737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031016589556258,0.0,0.08409687143125445,0.0,0.0,0.16853857180731668,0.09627108809717454,0.0,0.0,0.10855114825905897,0.0,0.0,0.21165331392118245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748505962780584,0.11271573368038815,0.0,0.17682394750596978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25186174248495,0.0,0.0,0.10023890547369843,0.10104892949919944,0.0,0.07179750213465093,0.0,0.0,0.11008977655346844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062374258206177036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30048787440949565,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hie33,2020/02/02,"How to get help TW: suicidal thoughts/self harm

I am 18 years old and after nearly 5 years of depression and self harm, I am ready to get myself help. Most people in my life don’t know, especially my family. Honestly, I don’t want my parents knowing that I cut myself and constantly map out my own suicide in my head. I also can’t imagine sitting down and having a serious conversation with them about my mental state because they don’t understand mental health. My boyfriend is very supportive and he thinks I should get help as soon as possible. I told him I want to wait, but I’m really just terrified. The problem is, without my parents I can’t afford therapy on my own. I really just want a diagnosis and medication so I can go to college in the fall without my mental struggles. 

My main question is, who do I talk to for help? Do I set up an appointment with my pediatrician so they can refer me to a psychiatrist? Do I find a psychiatrist on my own? I really don’t know how to go about this.",4.327796123474517,5.4007068944723615,6.319400574300072,75.07282663316583,70.5075376884422,10.107824838478106,30.797200287150034,10.290406445055957,3.2939401292175163,788,33,152,22,14,276,109,199,0.127,0.7659999999999999,0.107,-0.8366,3,0,0,0,0,2,20.0,0,0,3,0,10,9,1,1,7,0,18,4,1,2,0,32,35,14,2,5,5,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,9,0,1,9,0,0,3,8,7,0,0,1,0,35,2,27,33,5,22,0,1,0,0,17,10,0,2,6,110,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568196359051943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293593005868254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292963082587415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305210987628052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279289802101368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935553433272056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875324475422169,0.0,0.13599672243926392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279272634091185,0.12717956603114,0.0,0.0,0.3207884570709696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972652068768715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451048026586898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053214406828285,0.36172924180676735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554979455974322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657085041120857,0.0,0.0,0.08294842570883222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488443941666914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11448638037698775,0.0,0.0,0.13403244403156064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299475189897697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496366151841908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12508141592728564,0.0,0.2617496202093051,0.1357744247266504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616802889864633,0.0,0.0,0.1368272021581566,0.0,0.0,0.0766652075763712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432819541934378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455713830770022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872161592494702,0.211713367474781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306716022310987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15409797507296458
mentalhealth,StoneFoundation,2020/02/02,"I've read that empathy is an emotional feeling which allows us to understand other people's experiences from their frame of reference. I can do the latter in terms of seeing what other people have gone through and how they feel, but there's never an emotional reaction for me. Is that still empathy? For more context, I generally don't feel any form of pain when others are hurt or in distress, and I don't even feel guilt when I know I'm the one causing said distress, much less regret or remorse. I also feel nothing towards dead people, although I have cried over my pets when they die. I have a conscience and moral code for what is right and wrong partially thanks to what my parents, teachers, and others have told me I should do, but when I violate said moral code, I don't usually respond quite as strongly as how I believe other people might. 

I'm NOT seeking validation by asking this question, but I am curious as to whether or not empathy can exist without emotion given how much I hear that it requires a visceral response.

I have also been diagnosed with social anxiety and generalized anxiety by my psychotherapist, but I wasn't specifically told that any of my emotions towards other people outside of stress/anxiety/fear could factor into either of those issues.",12.246033755274265,8.679030227848106,11.55848101265823,59.09654008438821,56.84810126582279,14.415189873417726,47.008438818565395,12.261556223090626,5.8245578059071725,1032,49,164,23,9,339,137,237,0.177,0.74,0.083,-0.9815,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,0,3,3,12,10,1,3,6,0,22,2,0,5,1,42,41,27,2,3,12,1,5,0,0,2,2,3,1,0,17,8,0,1,9,1,0,1,8,8,0,1,8,9,25,2,27,30,7,16,2,2,1,0,14,7,0,5,8,134,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013659794786165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14467772052983238,0.0,0.1627536458009751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09944655757587588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984854991647664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927674836594596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493203119331516,0.0,0.11684828578141974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079687030047917,0.11040077987909766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4786316353476029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025989065680283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405546744715054,0.0,0.1197018006598074,0.2689327711026505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989270830975662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138769721378239,0.0,0.0,0.11102818907619336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05846108979525845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128473962112884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639618877569822,0.0,0.08204319883002215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206998130182053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720826647647451,0.0,0.11319083251721332,0.0,0.11811719586178344,0.0,0.0,0.3687362389328617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916469513396567,0.11314323883981316,0.10640409917032488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908439356501914,0.20237456377795968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476735160438531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084362349347944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495146197311558,0.0,0.12185256106411788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793609577606273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032923394152916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074045183941623,0.12795640329076371,0.0,0.11715737812783042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254200523814848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630470514246374,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymousboi-,2020/02/02,"Tired of being 
If being honest, today is one of those days that everything feels off?  I've got a good life ahead, almost done with school and about To start working full hours and moving to my own apartment and so on, but sometimes out of no where I get these thoughts of emptiness inside me, almost like everything is not going well and things will never be well. Im tired of trying to accomplish things and way too tired to even start, what ever it may even be. Im tired of being that dood who feels insecure all the time and is constantly feeling lonely and sad, sure I go out there and meet People and being social etc but everything still feels so damn insignificant. Thats all... 

I just felt like sharing my thoughts to someone.",5.796424100156492,6.464460880281693,5.604178403755871,82.98534428794993,66.95774647887322,8.282942097026604,27.045383411580595,8.167268648758528,1.6221993740219087,583,16,111,7,9,181,92,142,0.24600000000000002,0.632,0.122,-0.9754,0,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,13,12,1,1,2,0,12,5,0,0,5,32,25,14,0,1,5,0,5,2,0,2,5,0,0,0,10,12,0,0,7,0,0,3,3,4,2,1,5,5,6,8,18,12,5,22,0,2,0,0,4,7,1,4,13,81,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23249788761343496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545375119120256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486946239799923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880198821481075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294727944796983,0.153354781908361,0.10501147671212534,0.0,0.0,0.313006868201063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23479755561768684,0.0,0.11146611839309584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06065305687139998,0.0,0.13195503575842402,0.09737210588402026,0.09284903836360844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432681733165828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507976466353789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199891324899115,0.11343295988328225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338697276377783,0.0,0.0,0.08953698010362712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786666562603074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048328139233042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749087257981985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183407418082787,0.0983640154747354,0.0,0.1148175369560567,0.0,0.16434042979405858,0.0,0.09271088242451006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941493633839253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425216902365466,0.0,0.0,0.18432748731840765,0.06769393145389754,0.5337207546527294,0.11004123966119006,0.0,0.0,0.07881855954170389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214808928082864,0.0,0.0,0.2087605374293004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451604985285698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ohnonotthefrogs,2020/02/02,"Need advice regarding confidentiality (UK) Hi. I'm worried about a friend who is talking about suicide a lot lately. She's 17 (18 in July) and has attempted suicide many times in the past (before we were close friends). Her closest attempt at 14 put her in hospital, where they weren't very supportive and basically told her that others have it way worse. She's been going through a lot lately and I've talked to her about getting help, but she says she doesn't want to until she's 18 as they'll tell her parents about it. Her parents are very unsupportive and emotionally abusive, and after her attempt at 14 her mum basically told her she should've tried harder.

It's been really bad lately. She told me that her suicide isn't a matter of if, but when, and she really needs emergency help. I was wondering whether she could be admitted into a hospital or something? I don't know how much she would like that idea, but maybe it would help. I'm a bit clueless about everything so if there are any better alternatives, please let me know. I just can't have her parents involved because they'll make everything so much worse for her.

So these are my questions:

* Can I (also 17) admit her into a hospital?
* Do her parents need to sign papers? Is there a way to avoid that?
* Could I or my parents or someone else over 18 sign the papers instead?
* Is there any way to get emergency help for suicide without getting parents involved?

Any help would be appreciated. I'm really scared for her.",3.584672264355362,5.90016448239437,4.624929577464791,81.35934452871074,74.95070422535211,7.467822318526544,28.17659804983749,8.384062270229773,2.2010215601300107,1179,49,216,22,26,384,141,284,0.185,0.701,0.113,-0.9783,6,1,1,0,0,4,39.0,1,0,3,4,17,8,0,2,10,0,30,0,0,2,0,45,51,23,4,11,11,7,0,1,2,5,0,1,0,0,11,10,0,1,7,0,0,2,6,3,0,0,8,1,38,5,27,33,5,24,0,0,0,0,57,11,0,9,9,145,49,2,0.0,0.0904608663992898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460718274047788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06105612333170678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15575944601983868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374807515011258,0.046541531693825945,0.0,0.06496722199740013,0.0,0.0,0.06752432638430395,0.08335313667072802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219166395449038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377964178562533,0.0858821456133596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723479184634507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797381703438115,0.0,0.11966732094708955,0.0,0.043390793553814214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25587502157321057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618852395107979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391862895340435,0.0,0.2583743815871096,0.0,0.0,0.07807184068046308,0.0,0.037300176656421165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981807207696294,0.0,0.0,0.050963429842518414,0.07740571950328126,0.07670265111836498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225033420997638,0.16983504663386922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5086579723670599,0.0,0.07288358721594075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380807663812961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675165123470602,0.08552815103443287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673302629264265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06071564564546807,0.07643848743070787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469010696040757,0.058777051279993685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3340528662626704,0.08663973553970103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227325780672979,0.06673223341149757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04451961060341119,0.0,0.0,0.2188637065295317,0.0,0.05183583673978509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599154388625422,0.045032511842500095,0.1818064174079519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359753743776566,0.08279703787311965,0.0,0.07753593221340982,0.15561193936745615,0.16270803235219744,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SnapCrackleDavid,2020/02/02,"What if there’s never a good time? So, I’ve been struggling a lot recently. I haven’t been diagnosed with anything, but I know that I’m suffering from Social Anxiety and I think it’s growing into depression, too. I’m scared that everything’s just going to get worse and I really don’t want to go down that path. I’ve tried all I can to help myself, but it’s not working. So I think I need to tell my mom about it finally since that’s the only way a can think of getting help. I’ve looked up how to tell her about my mental state, and a lot of videos and websites have said that you should find a good time to do it. But there’s never a good time for me. My mom works late and when she gets home she usually stays in her room for the rest of the night(we don’t eat dinner together). Plus, my anxiety and worries make it 10x harder.",1.4244703389830526,3.1505322768361594,3.124375000000001,92.36588453389831,79.33898305084746,6.910875706214689,21.23199152542373,7.865858978985527,0.7434635593220333,651,18,149,11,16,216,101,177,0.193,0.746,0.061,-0.9748,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,2,10,7,0,2,9,0,10,3,0,2,3,30,26,15,0,4,6,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,11,9,2,0,5,1,0,3,6,4,0,0,3,2,18,3,20,22,4,21,0,2,1,0,13,5,0,3,10,93,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19435906985536908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453694528455344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094129287725526,0.12893534019608538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998598812523882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416864354736853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915792327728607,0.11610542766368286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19910775577630135,0.0,0.14439102434110054,0.31964656816698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17029444931646973,0.0,0.12742398149307185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981375427517192,0.0,0.14329822283073432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066753281453313,0.0,0.0,0.21599702229382006,0.0,0.0,0.0847951977390166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801890815649347,0.0,0.0,0.29755791899995143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419300863929976,0.19595063120197914,0.0,0.0,0.11921142052732354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966139605674518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138028921115036,0.0,0.12542929441792955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208370226814134,0.0,0.12718171984473944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508261848569997,0.0,0.0,0.12949366299491305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13539977083637267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328019782229818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22206405436916812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441919405422236,0.0,0.0,0.222221062988432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624674673387828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990838071587122,0.0,0.07492707531987228,0.10083250651148128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18496238421485892,0.12900769677848234,0.12945699700735894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Brclf,2020/02/02,"Mood changes/Bipolar disorder? I'm diagnosed with a few mental disorders but my key problem is my depression. Since a few weeks I experience extreme mood changes every day! Most of the time I'm in a very good mood, I see almost everything in a positive way, I'm very creative, I'm laughing and talking very much and just enjoying life, although I have the feeling that my mind is exploding because I have so many thoughts and ideas. But at a moment's notice everything changes: I get depressed, I see everything in a negative way, I hate talking to other people and I'm tied to my bed because I feel so powerless. 
I'm very confused with those mood changes because I never had it before in such an extreme way. Are those mood changes just normal for the end of a depressive episode or does this sound like a bipolar disorder to you?",6.145937500000002,6.788121718750002,6.653750000000006,75.85625000000002,66.1875,10.15,39.75,10.125756701596842,4.262575,665,38,119,15,10,217,90,160,0.223,0.631,0.146,-0.9459,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,5,15,1,1,12,0,6,3,0,0,1,22,19,10,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,1,0,6,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,2,5,14,4,13,17,4,14,0,3,2,0,3,5,0,4,7,70,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541807676154652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19252466654652084,0.0,0.08958158656936006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4454695327438245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789390488820879,0.0,0.27202056757051674,0.1068522852326609,0.0,0.0,0.36196408636218136,0.0,0.09212718633889906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324273105583987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886990403053403,0.0,0.28384414497367866,0.10297951330569696,0.0,0.0,0.10646078119506537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05500203611073337,0.0,0.0,0.08829998618810618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393763334020414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884307935958835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743591076889082,0.05143222846027391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673270226829593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609281263545133,0.0,0.10629811377358406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773895106048478,0.0,0.08119485590557085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031475112096253,0.0,0.1198567073038727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298468663891262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073431201176007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16778168080146438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708487452976682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16923271041905366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357688496380145,0.0613869152580247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3474528246291792,0.0,0.25068806729257115,0.08444555226410139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymousahhhhhhhh,2020/02/02,"Can I take action against this facility? I (17F) went to a counselor for the first time in August (was 16 at the time). Disclosed that I had intrusive suicidal thoughts, and she said I had to either agree to go to an inpatient facility, or she could call the police to take me there. I agreed, as I had no choice.

The place she sent me to was like a prison, suicidal and homicidal teens in the same unit, they took away things they said I could bring, strip-searched me upon arrival, and would strip-search everyone in the unit if there was a single marker missing. Allowed me one phone call to my parents only, and as soon as I started telling them about what was going one, someone came and took the phone away (listening from another phone?). Said I would have an hour of visiting time with my parents only, once a week, but I only got to see them for about 15 mins. The staff let us watch movies such as Suicide Squad and let us listen to uncensored rap music. They had us do coloring sheets about our feelings, and didn't offer any actual psychiatric support. During a ""group therapy"" session, we were asked what we'd want to know if we could know one thing. Someone said they wanted to know when a certain person would die, and the ""psychiatrist"" laughed and agreed. 

I now struggle with severe PTSD from being there and it has impacted so much. I'm far worse off now than I was before going there. Is there any sort of action I can take against them for this?",7.8154711246200606,6.66673865248227,7.287700101317121,78.69000000000003,63.18439716312057,10.610334346504557,33.97264437689969,9.606745405546679,2.901077203647416,1148,39,226,18,14,359,159,282,0.114,0.82,0.066,-0.9527,3,0,0,0,0,1,41.0,7,0,7,1,14,6,0,1,17,0,27,0,0,1,1,37,59,20,4,10,5,2,1,1,0,3,0,6,0,1,8,15,0,0,5,1,0,12,2,2,0,4,22,10,36,4,38,27,4,35,0,1,3,0,37,10,0,4,14,159,44,2,0.0,0.0,0.08693710053800081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12116587860677383,0.09341660410520156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328531496745223,0.0,0.16740233973096313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580738184848541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819377504464387,0.10189301326997584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133887127273474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245934649741476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851274640942424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045045602567518966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577826275779109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15189240148398653,0.0,0.07125186409885048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773379880864969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468814123572962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18219716515860346,0.0,0.04352392865008816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548997853422389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948758819297678,0.18110513581260665,0.2032664641647292,0.0,0.0,0.19784350711014012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778826225535365,0.09307806671734707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104139180811869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.338972603909154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099165370245666,0.0,0.0,0.10064415577880642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509680571031106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305699109007913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313418885124326,0.0,0.2923436512881299,0.10109608066007113,0.0,0.0,0.200949413676406,0.0,0.07786689570981037,0.0,0.10187996667061344,0.0,0.1183723038808995,0.0,0.0,0.07072597254405935,0.1558439017552758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979602368488311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214859199739294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050928981072166,0.0,0.07146107220298473,0.0,0.0,0.08258552898570061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907883494563165,0.1898568163932322,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,girlwhocould,2020/02/02,"Can you develop Autism as an adult? I never had many issues growing up except for thinking a little differently, being quirky on some things (ex: I can't eat produce that have stickers on them), and being really good with shapes and patterns (ex: I can walk outside and find 20 four leaf clovers almost instantly, because they look like squares versus triangles).

Autism is being talked about a lot more since I was a kid, so maybe I just never noticed it, but as an adult I've been noticing other small signs. Like I can NOT handle loud noises, eye contact is uncomfortable, and I have trouble making and maintaining close friendships. I also miss social cues alllllll the time, mostly when people are kidding or joking with me.

I tried to research, but everything I've seen says it starts in the younger years. A diagnosis isn't necessarily important to me, but I feel like if I knew, it would help me understand myself a little better, as well as help myself not get so frustrated with myself over my weird quirks. Can it develop into early adulthood?",7.842209138012247,8.103935689119174,7.882779086198777,69.79734809232221,62.57512953367876,10.126990108337258,34.125765426283564,9.800150414767053,3.3917606217616587,840,32,137,15,11,272,134,193,0.091,0.752,0.156,0.8843,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,2,2,7,11,1,0,9,0,18,2,1,2,2,35,28,18,0,2,10,2,1,3,0,1,0,2,0,4,7,10,1,0,5,1,0,2,6,4,1,1,5,7,21,7,18,19,4,20,0,1,4,0,15,11,0,6,10,98,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16307318480220753,0.0,0.0,0.13023302954742744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927332987282747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14402974039805228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014612812528945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16663869218880675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14636126342612735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234308184771888,0.1163418086327493,0.0,0.0,0.14884417082906773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508367326290547,0.0,0.0,0.13659289192171908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21831310228428832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997562667837496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386844141198851,0.3264418357411013,0.0,0.0,0.13675502588650384,0.0,0.0,0.13845131244853776,0.0,0.0,0.10870526168948973,0.165106803464145,0.16360715493177386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25120366731842314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37081714219013584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129013700270811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432743682362987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12950678886668088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13471321308386752,0.0,0.0,0.16600754403943754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11526778825121725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089461460755614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819191831608807,0.10434926154193704,0.0,0.0,0.09496056164022976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056611015200768,0.0,0.0,0.16953512307702073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642389248808493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156856939082442,0.0,0.0,0.10487162568465838
mentalhealth,MeanCommunist,2020/02/02,"SnapBack to depression and desires and lust? Hi.. my names Tanner.

I have an ex I’m partially fond of, this ex always meant a lot to me and had this child like wonder about everything. I checked there gram and found they had gotten with someone else and had moved into and gotten there own house....  I’m with someone of one year now whom I’m very very happy with, but for some reason seeing this has made me feel.. alone, like I’m missing out on something I should be apart of... i just don’t know what to do... any advice?",1.8974285714285701,3.9487879333333353,2.7773809523809554,93.85178571428574,79.19047619047619,5.342857142857143,20.02380952380953,6.2581,-0.009590476190475705,403,10,86,3,10,127,72,105,0.07200000000000001,0.833,0.094,0.3173,0,1,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,0,5,6,0,0,2,0,9,1,0,2,0,25,23,7,0,2,2,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,11,0,0,6,0,1,1,1,2,0,1,8,2,8,4,14,13,3,7,0,2,1,1,7,4,0,3,4,53,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20250139872350986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21462634245088996,0.0,0.0,0.17243080375144815,0.0,0.0,0.14092256055798238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17848569761378266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.173112912152174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862437119431471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478101143133403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272154740322609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22059870809751095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391139921920243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388742422519975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20248286205454732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617835313939392,0.0,0.19608472078432712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22025121632339886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14042346884219747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21306552433054626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16513437170646605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35116825651020644,0.15953470778336412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419706109671757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247305871043637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344843019123875
mentalhealth,strip_club_penguin,2020/02/02,"HELP! Mental breakdowns from overactive imagination Hi there!

I'm in need for a bit of advice so I thought I'd tell my story here and perhaps some of y'all could help me out with a wise word or two.

As long as I remember I've always had a very active imagination. I can't say I've always suffered because of it because it gave me a very interesting childhood, but it also had its huge downsides. I used to have terrible insomnia out of sheer fear because I would see creatures and people in my bedroom or sense their presence. My parents never believed me, rational people as they are, and honestly now, many years later I can't say I believe me either even though I remember many of those moments clear as day.

I used to have a hard time in kindergarten and middleschool since I would constantly be either tired from the previous night or dreaming and not paying attention. My teachers suspected ADHD but in a small community like the one I'm from it's not really a thing to just go and get diagnosed. You keep it under and deal with it. 

Anyways, I'm past that period now, 18 and finishing my senior year in high school. I could say things have gotten better since I don't have much trouble with sleeping about 80% of the nights and I've kind of learned to force myself to focus. The remaining 20% is what I'm here for because sometimes it gets really bad. I'm gonna describe my most recent episode (?) and let y'all be the judges.

I'm renting a room with my roommate near school and that day I got there a night before her so I knew I would be alone all night. Everything was fine for a while: i lit some candles, turned off the big lights and on the christmas lights and settled down to enjoy a book. Then, I realized that I needed to use the bathroom and that's when everything went south. On my way back I passed the two empty showers and after catching a quick glimpse at one's half-open door I couldn't shake the feeling that someone was right behind that door looking at me. Of course, having lived with this kind of stuff for 18 years I knew that it was probably just a feeling and I tried to calm myself down but I couldn't stop constantly looking over my shoulder the whole way back. I got to my door and almost ran the last few meters until i had safely closed it behind me but even despite that I could feel the panic bubble up. What if someone's already in my room. I looked at my closet and my hands started to shake. I quickly opened the door but nothing was there besides a sweater I had left there last week. I then turned back and started going towards my bed, then gasped and tripped over a chair trying to turn around. For about a second I was certain that in the reflection of the window I saw a very skinny woman stand behind me. By the time I got to my bed I wasn't even thinking clearly anymore and my brain's only remaining function was the fight or flight mechanism.  I curled up by the wall in the corner of my bed just staring blankly in front of me trying to not look at any dark spaces (especially the window) that could trigger a new wave of panic. I couldn't even close my eyes because I was certain that the monent I do that there will be someone standing next to me staring at me without me being aware and I couldn't risk it. I know that's never happened but i moments like this I always excuse these thoughts with ""there's a first time for everything"". 

Anyways, I eventually calmed down and even managed to go to sleep but stuff like this keeps happening and I don't know how to control it. I know it doesn't sound too bad written out like this but during the moment itsef it feels like my life is on line and this is the moment I die. Even writing it now keeps triggering those tiny panic attacks (for example I'm terrified of closing my laptop right now because my brain is certain that it will reveal a terrifying face or smth behind it). 

Has anyone had a similar experience or could direct me to someone who has? Anything helps, even if you're just guessing!

Thank you and so sorry for the long post!

Kit",4.997202706830521,5.7804105379825685,5.48399868417961,82.73051598956744,68.7758405977584,8.052905378415849,29.97037054442069,8.092016823424146,2.0112763410794425,3214,119,622,40,53,1032,358,803,0.096,0.799,0.106,-0.5876,3,1,0,0,1,0,60.0,0,4,2,3,41,34,2,7,46,0,51,13,9,7,8,129,107,58,1,16,26,1,6,5,0,6,4,4,15,1,46,40,1,6,22,2,2,11,16,14,0,6,26,22,88,20,96,60,10,120,0,1,10,0,23,50,0,13,59,431,134,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610478529185926,0.0537498138860352,0.0,0.0,0.05507911576347214,0.05696812977339934,0.06069889347075854,0.04398712221982275,0.1373045865601292,0.0,0.0,0.03740498312644837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545497377241604,0.0384604633025091,0.0,0.04526406151639164,0.04896571499054109,0.0,0.06257562125814893,0.0,0.12688532113853765,0.09185301063653564,0.2011815946903664,0.0,0.04680482445235703,0.12394259381300493,0.0,0.04864705840135019,0.06005072726648021,0.0,0.0,0.12280654744641704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11888076499535108,0.06169228480587757,0.2195833043295613,0.0,0.0,0.0709467742506927,0.056707280265547284,0.0,0.05582846480147579,0.05708604328850873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543099255920801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483036401351974,0.05380500867475027,0.0,0.061895415790191935,0.11124782147138576,0.039295264599064704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046786845808392194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05747521880943324,0.0,0.0937810674073156,0.0,0.13197650056225468,0.0,0.06059371785550913,0.0,0.09728069146570004,0.0,0.04927327667824269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060517995018893,0.058115331602259686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14667172556773486,0.0,0.11455755799790215,0.09068719368831316,0.08967210626727905,0.0,0.0,0.05976260921352509,0.05624588346824638,0.038851343396541976,0.13436223427527522,0.0,0.048570029197710266,0.09735459936764887,0.184759889522619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153196955549224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05543165354873863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040434676332832896,0.08157036014124402,0.08484580643483497,0.05312374132060988,0.05849796753599669,0.2064721924872441,0.0,0.05277835335433344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454501907717745,0.04183344216308908,0.0,0.19360797931564827,0.06107604822599324,0.0,0.05250807099673547,0.07626646449713569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052679158378647666,0.0,0.05930421272161401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047465194335553,0.0,0.05431036159547766,0.0,0.12461887510273155,0.09394717770480504,0.0,0.13122548795735972,0.0,0.11133509105656593,0.0438315083320925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100067147539008,0.0,0.11008855590941416,0.0,0.18642072152675665,0.0,0.054400910688652215,0.06157309527585349,0.07786501331397612,0.0,0.0,0.04598627035526436,0.0,0.0,0.12593410995193133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04807640490251917,0.050640803526047946,0.0,0.0,0.07308516358261824,0.03524469742387332,0.054041695349361686,0.08733494412887599,0.09622079388264472,0.06321964369792986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203344537544356,0.1794874804454078,0.10746291419924092,0.0,0.0,0.1425188233777626,0.0,0.13615355357922385,0.0,0.08732010994130411,0.04412133565465876,0.0,0.0,0.050989772924838035,0.0,0.0614106205761941,0.0,0.05302242752565668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722097170074147,0.0,0.0,0.10626338876734732
mentalhealth,GhuruOfDissociation,2020/02/02,"I am really confused with my ""diagnosis"" So i take 5mg zyprexa , 100mg zoloft, 15mg abilify. My doctor diagnosed me with psychosis 1 year ago. He/she avoids to diagnose me with a disorder because he/she does not want me to get stigmatized.  Anyone else had the same problem with me in the past?",1.390443349753692,3.944967896551724,3.713842364532024,83.1939655172414,85.55172413793103,8.141871921182268,27.25123152709359,8.841846274778883,2.7684748768472907,230,11,45,7,7,79,44,58,0.19899999999999998,0.8009999999999999,0.0,-0.8366,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,3,0,2,4,0,0,0,10,5,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,8,0,7,4,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,23,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23295263348287015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18375294390067007,0.2692653678673683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16019788941966334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5334644400946079,0.0,0.0,0.3011867711347353,0.2689826518922846,0.22997438833788306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21953218190613932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372999666501616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25086834103649713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25146010325684315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683537281273706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19758974726375936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15500378027720807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692318885264842
mentalhealth,Ghost_X0,2020/02/02,"In desperate need of encouragement... What would you say to someone who feels so lonely and sad they see no hope anymore?
I’ve been hysterical for hours. I want out. Logically I know this is temporary, and in a few weeks I’ll probably think wow I’m glad I’m not dead. But my pain doesn’t care that it’s temporary, it hurts so bad I’d do almost anything to stop it.",0.09447368421052717,2.4329405526315817,2.5897894736842098,90.03152631578949,90.84210526315788,6.72421052631579,20.757894736842104,7.908726449838941,1.1308515789473679,286,10,64,7,10,98,62,76,0.267,0.544,0.188,-0.7499,0,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,1,0,2,10,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,15,15,5,1,4,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,7,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,3,5,5,7,13,1,6,0,3,1,0,5,3,0,2,3,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543819000155261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25193697711507673,0.0,0.0,0.20905124948638984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121107342046708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25900820208488834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844901287089572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523165966911164,0.2501758042972831,0.0,0.271952440006777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396123879728195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883656165322972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703138528498887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738954339033511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20202084761375125,0.0,0.0,0.20243502851326767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21524518271084625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123867579471536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627769976311622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14983792259610462,0.0,0.20377359076084306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18046097926331392,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cbldd,2020/02/02,"I feel dead inside I want everything to stop, i don’t know whats wrong with me but i want everything to stop. I hate the voice in my head telling me to do or not to do things that I’m supposed to do, or telling me how to feel in situations. I don’t want to listen to the voice but I genuinely can’t help it. It’s always there.
I feel like i cant even handle my relationship anymore cause my boyfriend doesn’t understand why i feel certain ways. (Which i don’t want to feel it just happens)My emotions are all over the place, i get very happy over little things then i get very sad over little things, it doesn’t feel normal.

I hope atleast one person understands me if you do please speak to me i dont know whats wrong with me",1.5175207373271888,3.2632779548387134,2.887857142857147,94.0775,79.12903225806451,6.493087557603687,21.394009216589858,7.447530270364453,0.4867235023041476,573,16,134,8,14,186,77,155,0.142,0.6890000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.3291,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,4,8,1,0,3,0,13,1,1,2,2,31,33,7,1,7,7,0,6,1,0,0,0,4,0,1,11,2,0,2,10,0,0,0,9,4,0,1,0,10,25,4,17,33,1,12,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,4,4,82,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283271648353072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256322649170215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269559569403291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448408352201886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13901662109303273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081626803379858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22214066640548466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3749300869782255,0.0882892313700975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913624436145954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315586537491506,0.0,0.12201471587661035,0.12683398304445528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283649801055103,0.0,0.0,0.12274790521815042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13583829514906148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060377445019751175,0.2477295058701063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108717380958207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374447282573971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790975615421812,0.12912014218550955,0.13565934515644376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13268416385424586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13891484809249027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20664538104881106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21603767676281446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463133783334083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573129278736626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20394132671316292,0.29157481294703536,0.0980961124518506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151634451011247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702418466658131,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WestNecessary0,2020/02/02,"Brother Is Losing His Mind (Need Advice) Hello,

Don’t know if this is the correct forum to post this, but here I go.

Over the past 5 months my brother has been losing his mind. He is in his late 20’s. Symptoms / episodes are:

-He believes he has gone to other worlds where he has learned a lot and says we were there with him
-He believes our neighbors have hacked into his dog’s mind. He has a strong bond with the dog and believes they have hacked him through hacking the dog
-He freaks out if my parents let their dogs off the leash because they are breaking the rules and, by doing so, are hurting his spirituality
-He, at times, believes he and/or his dog are Jesus
-He had an episode where he screamed at my neighbors in the street because he believed they were trying to kill him and my dad (they are not - bewildered all of us)

His symptoms come in waves. They seem to heat up for a week and then he becomes normal again for 6 weeks. We don’t bring up his episodes to him when he is acting normal because we don’t want to agitate him / throw him back into that mindset. We brought him to a psychiatrist but don’t know how good she is at helping him. She diagnosed him with depression and gave him a low dose anti depressant. It helps out but he doesn’t seem to consistently take it. One other thing is that he doesn’t mention any of his episodes when he talks to the psychiatrist- he keeps it secret. The most he he has mentioned is his ‘third eye’. I think he might have  he schizophrenia but would like some advice from this forum. Let me know what are some good options in terms of getting him help / how I can better support him. In Southern California, in case any1 has recommendations. He also smokes weed a few times a week which I am trying to get him to stop.",3.606171428571429,5.2844193028571445,3.8495714285714304,89.72692857142859,73.11428571428571,6.257142857142857,26.214285714285715,6.7097532225279775,0.911142857142857,1396,48,288,11,28,432,179,350,0.124,0.789,0.08800000000000001,-0.9296,1,0,1,0,0,0,39.0,6,0,6,4,12,15,1,0,17,0,39,5,1,2,2,53,58,19,1,7,7,4,0,1,2,2,4,2,2,0,13,18,0,2,8,0,0,7,7,9,0,2,7,3,46,6,39,47,7,46,1,6,1,0,76,22,0,10,16,188,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18195592726601864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445344488300633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331239028635023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715895076187652,0.0,0.17026190866612767,0.1028235807331909,0.0,0.5244690156699338,0.0,0.08234094204446711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019892357538183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16037682118621144,0.09449632795314716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728365530215198,0.0,0.05291187648350328,0.15617868040765456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872124443159258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996673610589694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275312322001667,0.10300330471617293,0.0,0.15349887958400185,0.0,0.10502284198515928,0.0,0.0,0.19040571755393887,0.0,0.04548481782453874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20831411279568265,0.0,0.07915178811541912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876625600075407,0.2820187157835129,0.0,0.07431293763516679,0.0,0.0,0.06903377632336005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18243991741669088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308816295629502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337848808432798,0.0,0.0888761658544386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916575163128758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403825742492702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695126936783388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783724127621504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565077542899827,0.0,0.1935367560579874,0.07000093784809477,0.07483166910907929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061852673282088336,0.059655849363203964,0.0,0.0,0.10857677144898813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12641996913898132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198995553862068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05491383100419954,0.0,0.22404185133405133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613682001471907,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AMAISTHEBEAST,2020/02/02,"How can I be more honest with a therapist? Hey everyone,

I've seen a lot of therapists throughout the years, but I struggle to be honest with them. I get very closed off because it's the only thing that's worked for me throughout my 'trauma' and I'm struggling to open up. This leads to my therapists always underestimating me, not that I'm trying to be dramatic or say that I'm much better at diagnosing myself than professionals, but I feel like they never quite understand what I'm going through because I fail to really tell them what it is I'm really feeling or doing. This leads to me just quitting therapy every time, things getting worse, and the cycle repeating itself over and over. Anyone have any tips on how to bypass my stupid instincts? Thanks",7.489374999999999,7.4223280763888875,7.900833333333335,70.4775,63.375,10.811111111111114,33.27777777777778,10.411451182825502,3.4786277777777777,609,22,105,13,8,201,95,144,0.127,0.743,0.13,-0.2925,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,3,7,3,10,1,2,5,0,7,1,0,4,1,22,20,9,0,0,6,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,12,7,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,1,4,15,5,19,16,3,15,0,1,1,0,6,8,0,3,5,73,27,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441896866056545,0.0,0.0,0.10168391763054106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455319734443408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18230131383048614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224503972448926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517673994698002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598347946697688,0.14288006073306952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121132760349973,0.1068225705450547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15624403292627967,0.0,0.08497999942336516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305164831389573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712304600468574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099200147677159,0.0,0.11532492828096315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372250250009547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.318082085797527,0.0,0.0,0.19158246052468267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891037497486773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126374948667319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069374151444713,0.13766495434791573,0.17099787924218082,0.5208393185701641,0.19867902970646809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719076498829692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151944722544423,0.0,0.0,0.1556635388222915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337595662457765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088578973357199,0.0,0.1523814320348231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962908928830296
mentalhealth,deerjaenny,2020/02/02,"How can I revisit trauma? Here me out. It might sound kind of weird.
Sometimes when I'm around a specific person who is very close to me I feel some kind of weird sexuality but that should not be and I immediately focus on something else and feel discusting. And I wonder why this is. And I have a strange feeling that maybe something occured with this person, something very traumatic but I can't remember it. And I wonder if there is a technique how I can revisit the trauma. I don't know how to word it correct I hope you can understand what I'm trying to ask. I just feel so horrible.",1.829487179487181,4.330614170940173,3.754188034188037,84.17692307692309,82.5042735042735,7.018803418803419,25.23931623931624,8.139509932561175,1.8465521367521376,466,19,91,10,13,157,71,117,0.191,0.762,0.047,-0.9511,0,0,3,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,0,4,0,12,0,0,3,1,32,24,13,0,3,5,0,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,9,9,0,0,9,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,5,14,3,9,21,1,5,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,6,1,66,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123772982103278,0.1588238080754257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192093020152385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34360507081573416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16873866940724494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3538276732769212,0.09336686087336976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17067690082409234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18022597900383214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29668202707267993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19245175697964084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3923678571383617,0.16802512195191782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534386148814428,0.0,0.0,0.17686102664448575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28035336363230096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329890604938706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3684759683154038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,baileyboyer,2020/02/02,"Seeking participants for an online psychological research study about eco-anxiety! [Research] [Academic] As part of my honours BSc at the University of New Brunswick, I am conducting research into the potential relationships between environmental worry, personality, mental health symptoms, and pro-environmental behaviour.  
The questionnaires will take approximately 20 minutes to complete. You can access the study by clicking the link below. As thanks for participating in the study, you can choose to be entered into a draw to win one of two $25 Superstore gift cards!  
Your responses will be kept confidential and anonymous. Thank you!

`https://unbpsychology.ca1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_1MJciivfvkO0Did`",10.330571428571432,14.476521152380958,9.407857142857145,46.31464285714287,61.28571428571429,11.81904761904762,41.92857142857143,11.20814326018867,6.618314285714287,591,33,65,20,10,186,81,105,0.027000000000000003,0.823,0.15,0.9228,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,4,0,2,1,4,0,0,8,0,7,2,0,0,0,7,11,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,6,4,18,6,1,8,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,0,1,44,6,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953747964937256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677744965929971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714706086054832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573758780286005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466599621556363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306077402848746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765655195567191,0.0,0.0,0.22299914603479828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741962940732814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654509121589173,0.1920236050478077,0.0,0.0,0.4702627627779662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494816600881571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593637901537218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GaileoB,2020/02/02,"Paranoia? I feel like I was seeing someone or something in the mirror of my car. I was scared to get out of my car cause I thought that person/thing was going to grab me once I got out.  I finally got myself inside my house but I'm afraid to go outside by myself since I feel like they'll grab me.

I'm also feeling like I'm in a simulation and that the person/thing is going to end my simulation which would pretty much kill me.

I was feeling fine this morning, so I dont know why I'm feeling like this. I called my campus crisis line and they told me to distract myself.",2.730899908172635,3.768516066115701,4.4764738292011055,86.91450872359967,74.28925619834712,6.369513314967861,24.18824609733701,6.42735559955562,0.6787788797061531,448,13,95,3,9,152,68,121,0.142,0.6779999999999999,0.179,0.2023,0,0,1,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,2,0,2,9,1,3,3,0,8,0,0,1,0,15,27,6,1,1,2,0,7,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,7,0,0,5,1,4,0,0,8,8,24,5,12,17,1,11,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,1,6,58,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878867176679404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167759165087902,0.0,0.0,0.15259315103224155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17408966051729524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13156377688171586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3755355056956883,0.4244726231573354,0.0,0.16272007298394606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776068603415214,0.0,0.2532588601390003,0.0,0.2376045899354125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17139707424105646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643392830788581,0.0,0.081634584099844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2902797098735608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919517468985264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158191966664959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25940160848745875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112021893639507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14871606479871716,0.0,0.1183684313396171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287515469216717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585882402867982,0.11435458838398567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11792544599816007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14193787386595785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340356987612098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551969780274288,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fuckyououtofcyan,2020/02/02,"Really not in a good place right now My dad and I were in the kitchen just now, joking around and insulting each other because that's our relationship. He was cutting vegetables and at one point he turned around and said ""I have a knife, kid, don't say that about my face."" He was joking, but it made me remember something. 6 years ago the school bully pulled a knife on me, and I haven't been the same since. I try not to think about it but so many things remind me of it. So yeah, right now my mental state is fucked. I hate this. I don't know how to deal with it. Honestly I'm not sure why I'm posting this but I am so there you have it.",0.5355252100840318,2.51114066176471,1.994159663865549,98.06764705882357,83.55882352941177,5.650420168067227,17.067226890756302,6.868970318607317,-0.3287126050420168,494,10,120,6,14,159,86,136,0.18899999999999997,0.762,0.048,-0.9690000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,1,1,0,0,13,9,4,0,6,1,11,4,1,2,1,23,20,12,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,11,9,2,0,3,2,0,1,6,4,0,1,6,2,15,5,12,14,2,18,0,0,0,1,12,10,1,0,5,78,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16534845304848936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3321042259043602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370754990465515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923052427537225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17244487894242744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564533303628135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841607183432868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251254462812727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650011690974265,0.0,0.1891131295640768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879793483660831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263982148552009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19488516583128854,0.0,0.17633206175047147,0.0,0.17864511033907654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949651778825515,0.0,0.0,0.20026445787807146,0.21130323052088384,0.3185928637372162,0.1774336706135822,0.14833691664129867,0.0,0.1887793032250977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15430034853442587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436006561974615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175803234675507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12392289013541245,0.11952151579375415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664228654340928,0.20289213505259399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16831519021663022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201198310401852
mentalhealth,samhf18,2020/02/02,"What's wrong with me? Whenever I listen to a song and the background is for example a different culture of a vast landscape I focus really hard on the image itself and end up feeling strange, strange as in emotional. It's  weird for me describe. I don't often feel like this it happens on random days, what does this mean and what causes it?

It's a somewhat good feeling. It's like I'm high but in my head I just get emotional whenever I look at landscape/culture pictures knowing I'll never get there",3.7071000000000014,5.41041611,5.097000000000001,80.78350000000002,72.9,7.800000000000002,32.5,8.472884824447931,2.7764,401,20,73,7,8,134,66,100,0.12300000000000001,0.7929999999999999,0.084,-0.3639,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,6,0,2,1,1,1,1,16,13,5,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,11,4,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,7,8,3,12,13,1,11,0,0,1,0,2,8,0,3,5,48,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20790064684712864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051875849884148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21144467521108715,0.0,0.0,0.17710464591399294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4553019195677101,0.17924916112113554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30698916964510736,0.28916151323417355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21147104382644272,0.0,0.0,0.16974726364189424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17896451544289965,0.0,0.1812932854844028,0.0,0.207700904728194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21382623834800668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122309700432023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977458982957854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16994875140951102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22045182700005594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608841186461062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296502085462317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22127143964340326,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,curlytots,2020/02/02,"Supporting someone with Anhedonia Hey, as the title suggests, i just want some advice on supporting someone with Anhedonia (can’t experience joy etc) 

It’s someone i’m seeing, who’s backed off a little due to the present situation with the anhedonia and i was looking at ways to be better for her benefit. 

Thanks in advance!",3.6998789346246994,6.799365525423727,5.897142857142858,67.79525423728813,80.18644067796609,8.795157384987894,33.85230024213075,9.23628265651192,4.238494430992736,262,15,40,8,7,91,46,59,0.0,0.6759999999999999,0.324,0.9589,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,10,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,3,6,11,8,2,10,0,0,2,0,4,5,0,1,3,28,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21037944455101976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655451523323862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19040700582176467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401058850287819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105954796989108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21577770100342406,0.0,0.0,0.18078984894483116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715587033713394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24199561090921715,0.0,0.0,0.5472449811280501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4886183546775431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982106233896237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698395087665396,0.17088762638821306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dutchessgummybuns_,2020/02/02,"Venting My mental health has never been in control. I've been diagnosed, for sure, with anxiety and depression. I've also scored extremely high for unspecified mood disorders. I came off of my meds last June, which almost cost me my relationship (I went completely manic and had a very bad meltdown). 

Fast forward to now, I'm pregnant, 33 weeks. Still in the same relationship. And I just feel incompatible with the world. Being around people is getting harder, and I feel like a giant burden to my SO, and even my unborn child. He recently opened up about his own demons and admitted he wanted to sleep with other people, and the results of that talk were damaging at the very least. 

I am seeking therapy and actively talking to my OB about a game plan, as I know postpartum is probably going to wreak havoc on my mental health. I just hate myself and I hate my personality and a lot of times I wish I could just start over. There's a lot of times where I don't even want to speak anymore. I feel like I take all of these steps to get better, but in my soul, nothing helps. I still feel very empty and very very sad.",4.95888888888889,6.099472296296297,5.868592592592595,78.6356666666667,69.0925925925926,9.093333333333334,27.825925925925933,9.3871,2.3583281481481486,880,29,167,18,15,290,136,216,0.135,0.8109999999999999,0.055,-0.9523,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,3,15,12,2,0,9,0,11,4,1,2,3,40,30,15,0,4,4,0,4,2,0,0,3,1,0,2,4,17,0,1,6,1,1,5,2,7,0,0,6,5,26,4,29,22,6,31,2,3,0,0,13,15,0,3,15,110,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848475175417227,0.0,0.0,0.08663777492162644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828781925973395,0.0,0.1074420798742266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644369488475492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904576164545688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958160635131538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390968952242952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359022094747395,0.0,0.12151016060341024,0.08649899305519147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331126960216933,0.10996068220872338,0.0,0.0,0.12416461281034835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14311231483792988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21911557816836966,0.15479322665420062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320415656878073,0.0,0.06157092197227496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21392248269399766,0.0,0.2303162310420603,0.0,0.0,0.07261660687721368,0.11446493347962758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595396734206093,0.08830984351178586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105856845582521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842100070497383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033897752524572,0.0,0.21835823219755726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835568628951187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395313145960187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15021570977410675,0.09459647050589652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168065737058839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106970600629579,0.2326287082828717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841613462074247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668211918993884,0.0,0.17303756465014936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10210718324120527,0.0,0.08145661368813632,0.1741557913262335,0.0,0.0,0.1238938238607473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634539478053594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44695054425347736,0.1278009939795808,0.0,0.0869021239577073,0.0,0.0,0.10043031339695496,0.0,0.0,0.12458323179439885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,djheavypickles,2020/02/02,"How do you reason with a person who has an intellectual complex? I have a dear friend who unfortunately after a few beers can get very angry and defensive about his intelligence. He is a clever guy, but constantly and very seriously states that he is smarter than Elon Musk, Einstein etc... He refers to his college days of supposedly helping doctor's/physicist's with their mathematics even though he was studying renewable science. I am not doubting that he did those things but he keeps referring to himself as a genius and nobody sees him. When he says things like this he comes across as kind of delusional.


It is kind of jarring to hear these statements in such an aggressive and confident tone. 
I am not saying he cannot be a genius or anything like that but he wants to be made feel like the smartest person in the room everytime I see him, to which is draining our relationship.
I just want to have a couple beers and good conversation rather than having to cater to his beliefs.

Are there any techniques to veer someone from this type of thinking and aggression?",6.870910518053378,8.156117551020408,6.484897959183673,75.4227394034537,64.81632653061224,9.500156985871273,33.954474097331236,9.661875296680813,3.2700452119309262,864,37,150,17,13,269,129,196,0.052000000000000005,0.737,0.21100000000000002,0.9869,0,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,1,1,1,0,9,14,3,1,11,0,18,2,0,3,0,32,29,15,0,3,8,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,1,3,13,9,2,2,8,2,0,1,3,5,0,0,3,6,14,9,25,24,2,10,1,0,2,0,31,4,0,2,7,103,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089891126485949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318885743876917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805843494962486,0.0,0.1731949596665906,0.0,0.0,0.17733573387968568,0.0,0.1033609070845393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640431614415754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874344294142244,0.10585683973218617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103734003346211,0.11449693762635466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382422346995785,0.0,0.08373447297313014,0.0,0.0,0.13442689270830266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15869252201108108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18063596583998975,0.0,0.10742561916913464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245536186293595,0.0,0.3337931352935972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23489951546253246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15165137248154245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798832072254115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16478427826493586,0.0,0.17207002708112748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549063127231432,0.0,0.0,0.25542891881624274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357962717816711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21295256569744891,0.10269456036941957,0.15746448547353972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644791103258105,0.1890628259717732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heathenborne,2020/02/02,"I’m having a hard time finding a therapist that’s willing to focus on the issues I’m having today and not fixate on my past trauma. 10 years ago I had an extremely traumatic episode that led to me completely losing my sense of self and my grip on reality, eventually I was sedated by paramedics and placed in an involuntary hold for 3 days so I wouldn’t harm myself. After years of therapy I’ve moved past it. 

I live in a different country now and have some anxiety and numbness occasionally but nothing remotely similar to what happened to me before. Whenever I tell a therapist what happened they’re like a dog with a damn bone and will not even consider working with me in the now. It always comes back to what happened before. My therapist at home agrees with me that what happened was the cause of a traumatic event, not chronic illness and by all accounts I’ve recovered as much as a person could be expected to.

I’ve tried just not disclosing it but that feels disingenuous, and counterproductive to put up walls like that. 

I don’t accept that every bad spell in my life for the rest of my life has to be rooted in that one event and it’s driving me up the wall that that’s all anyone wants to focus on.",6.3057983193277325,6.472276890756304,7.252605042016808,73.34386554621852,65.80672268907563,10.833613445378154,33.80672268907563,10.608840637214634,3.611643697478991,972,40,181,24,14,327,133,238,0.11199999999999999,0.826,0.063,-0.8636,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,6,9,1,0,15,0,14,6,1,3,2,34,23,14,0,4,7,0,3,2,0,3,5,0,1,2,17,13,0,1,3,0,1,5,6,6,0,1,3,3,18,3,35,14,5,34,0,1,0,0,3,15,1,1,16,126,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112440312540464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442216136446036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960035780546852,0.0,0.0,0.08774924725550402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649815647569347,0.10478335216754893,0.0,0.0,0.21357455220007174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289182652675106,0.0,0.10810310803605527,0.13157945777077454,0.0,0.0,0.100197803199829,0.0,0.0,0.08093410090692169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311159014734063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288847679679573,0.0,0.1057352215966926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06345420566145354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114700451031975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4439003961792221,0.0,0.11241915897684744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258820405182233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309845117605693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17728211493953824,0.12262135091288835,0.0,0.11081466876138443,0.0,0.0,0.14039716518027762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333816670297082,0.09225350155869176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041614636310499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503887822696568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395989704316178,0.0,0.10957767484183883,0.1311159014734063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261574609402601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091899065941814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968844311013956,0.0,0.14351483806236495,0.4371292251832276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317733163290879,0.0,0.11895489174635117,0.0,0.0,0.08520308610439481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402039255727508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136208926789817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162974605570066
mentalhealth,annaclaraa,2020/02/02,"Slow motion voices inside my head are driving me nuts For as long as I can remember, I sometimes hear certain sounds/voices inside my head in slow motion. An example for this, is a few weeks ago, I heard a very fast song, and afterwards it played inside my head, but in slow motion. The slow motion feeling is for some reason very uncomfortable and drives me crazy sometimes. Every time I think of that song right now, it plays in slow motion in my head, and then all thoughts I have after that, are in slow motion as well. Sometimes I have it with voices as well. I wanted to note that I have autism and OCD (im 17, female). I wondered if more people experienced these weird slow motion like sounds inside their heads.

I also sometimes hear voices inside my head when I am tired and about to fall asleep. Then I usually cannot hear what the voices are saying but sometimes I pick up a few words. The voices are almost always of people I know, like my parents or my friends.",4.40920634920635,5.838052857142857,4.783994708994712,84.80869047619052,70.6931216931217,6.669841269841268,23.023809523809533,6.868970318607317,0.7402952380952379,766,18,144,6,14,242,98,189,0.075,0.8029999999999999,0.122,0.7882,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,0,6,9,0,0,7,0,12,8,7,2,2,24,22,17,0,2,4,1,1,2,1,0,1,13,0,0,9,6,0,0,7,4,0,10,1,1,2,0,2,15,24,8,20,20,5,36,0,0,0,0,8,7,0,5,21,93,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838330533050975,0.0,0.09984110255376974,0.0,0.0,0.07973480909631937,0.08296333445585337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840065598955869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05041432219112621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703256664770579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6139623953649282,0.0,0.3371275430833063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076995314452054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479578045655055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742257787317628,0.0,0.0,0.08823662476071184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11071165377267073,0.0,0.0,0.13824709779240565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251431862213553,0.0,0.0,0.11294740045117695,0.08514833320983743,0.0,0.07929017026515235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.493058650978405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388754432959133,0.0,0.07915538396389446,0.058139339001597824,0.1145973177376931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981201331074658,0.1645356952150961,0.05880915031866817,0.0,0.07997809581444862,0.0,0.17929523954482973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10812684540561987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,earth1space,2020/02/02,"I desperately need advice for my father Hi everyone. I’m not sure if this is the right place to post this (pls let me know if it’s not), but all advice and suggestions are greatly appreciated. 

The situation: For the past few years, my mother and I have noticed my father become increasingly dictative, controlling, and stubborn. He believes that every opinion and belief he has is absolutely right and everyone else who disagrees is wrong and not normal. He doesn’t consider other people’s opinions as valid, and any resistance to his opinion leads to him getting very angry, upset, and  yelling. My mom and I essentially have to agree with everything he says and thinks. Additionally, he wants to control and monitor every aspect of our lives, claiming he wants to ensure we are on the ‘right track’. He pretty much tries to micromanage everything. I am fine with letting him know what I’m up to, but the issue is that he gets upset if I spend time with friends or even if I am doing school work (I heavily prioritize my academics and spend a lot of time on them). He wants me to spend a majority of my time with him or doing chores around the home. Finally, the other condition is that he talks for extremely long periods of time usually either repeating the same thing over and over again with different wording or by branching off and talking about previous experiences. It’s very common for us to have to sit and listen to him talk for 3-4 hours straight about things he believes we did wrong. 

So my question is, do you all believe this has something to do with his mental health, and if so what could the condition be. I’m fairly certain this has to be some kind of mental health condition since it’s been getting worse over the years. Also, what would be the best way to get help for my father? There is no way we would be able to take him to a doctor or psychologist regarding the issue since he would never believe that anything is wrong with him and he would get extremely angry at us. 

Sorry for the long post, but we are in desperate need for some advice. Any suggestion is greatly appreciated. Thank you so much for your time!",6.8576943755169575,7.269696451612905,7.2386507444168755,73.07284791149709,64.63275434243178,10.4883788254756,33.168837882547564,10.317481424215053,3.4145517783291965,1702,66,304,38,24,556,197,403,0.113,0.7879999999999999,0.099,-0.6358,1,0,1,0,1,0,40.0,7,3,1,5,10,15,1,2,16,0,38,3,0,3,5,79,57,34,0,16,16,5,0,0,1,4,3,3,2,0,19,30,0,3,5,0,3,2,6,6,0,0,2,3,36,9,52,44,13,40,1,0,0,0,49,15,0,16,18,213,55,5,0.07381239597966095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21638585723627016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590277463972507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003899208021585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060741312667530266,0.06570868155860378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151999221410572,0.0,0.33264517550614114,0.07746155571770974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165573756973228,0.05893319202043446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07711824363109197,0.0,0.0755501149842042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06166078544122569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04875239140328004,0.0,0.1243802542307975,0.14106181503860812,0.1326756441115027,0.07220268675643841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085787187430657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05702727403432116,0.0,0.19281965202538487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275685429645007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15691825060626932,0.0,0.0,0.04947489312663609,0.0,0.07403985146250419,0.0,0.07269034166505403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540819286804815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686425185529852,0.08113072493900278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15095635166406854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517769795582361,0.13064329540271252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275265950564875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14877106857336894,0.0,0.0,0.08644818607181143,0.0,0.0,0.10852120801636717,0.10946191269089034,0.056928670169387616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232047620449172,0.0,0.08403590204811053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704622840092817,0.05117222152490692,0.0,0.07711824363109197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14138374343544174,0.07509374274667234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268677625761621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18910614858765215,0.0,0.0586985798956693,0.0,0.07470208538716573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221167534212584,0.08296822569929796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05682438857253733,0.0,0.08262693418936469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956730967700532,0.0,0.05549773571068378,0.17798282377375554,0.0,0.06795653720991714,0.0,0.0,0.09807535214050102,0.047296002929845975,0.0,0.0,0.2152030083965248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05011377169726691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775744481658472,0.0,0.08129392603483991,0.12180591388536165,0.1306093906861206,0.11717768848884973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05373630337458642,0.0,0.07522113747268094,0.20973683329140366,0.24210680321914796,0.0,0.0950655259528776
mentalhealth,jmgmj,2020/02/02,"My worry of loss is making me not want to have kids Made a throwaway for this as I have fam and friends on reddit and I don’t want them finding out I’m pouring my heart out to internet strangers. Haha

So, I’m not a worrier. At all. I’m usually free and easy, not a care in the world etc. 

But every now and again I worry about losing the ones I love. It’s not an accident worry, just a niggling little thing that drifts into my mind every so often during quiet moments. 

Now my fiancée and I don’t want kids. We like our holidays and stuff and want to spend our money on us. But sometimes my fiancée sometimes just asks out of curiosity if I really don’t want children. And while the aforementioned reasons are my primary reasons for not wanting kids I also worry that if I had them I’d love them so much that I would be scared of losing them. 

Plus I’m 30 and I’m one of those that doesn’t really know what I want to do in life so I go from job to job and I don’t want to be a disappointment to kids. That adds to the worry. 

I was trying to think when it started and as best I can remember I can trace it back to about 5 years ago. I still lived at home back then and suddenly my mum decided she was leaving my dad. They had grown apart, normal stuff, but it came out of the blue and blindsided me (and my dad being the pretty content, happy go lucky guy that he is, got blindsided by it too).

This coincided with me moving out which left my dad rattling around in a big house on his own. Since then I’ve felt a lot of responsibility for my dad. He’s a pretty independent guy and seems quite happy in his own company but I personally don’t want him to be alone all day every day. Anyway, that’s where the worry started, I think. 

I don’t know where I’m going with this, this just seems like a huge tangent. Haha anyway, TL:DR, I don’t want kids because of (amongst other more selfish reasons) my niggling fear of losing people I love combined with worrying I’m a disappointment",2.3539716616573614,3.8975946082725095,4.2261149277229135,86.29390832975525,76.15328467153284,7.073736940031487,23.767067410905966,7.827709963407826,1.1341091455560326,1548,48,328,23,34,526,192,411,0.134,0.723,0.14300000000000002,0.9426,2,1,0,0,0,0,37.0,4,0,5,6,24,23,0,2,18,2,25,5,1,6,2,77,63,33,0,14,14,5,1,2,1,1,1,1,1,9,23,29,0,0,13,1,3,7,13,9,0,2,8,3,49,15,48,50,9,50,0,6,1,3,34,24,0,7,21,224,72,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062209420950912774,0.0,0.0,0.07268424618373771,0.0,0.056122095513001034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06247416050152797,0.06560786180081965,0.0,0.0,0.10792658931020373,0.0,0.04278044763588576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736484974255673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026604372809469,0.0715521352609394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051925745309064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826810051324808,0.0,0.0,0.17738642250275613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897085013733053,0.0,0.0,0.06738281500196107,0.0,0.06414230553379145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05422009674333974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196529747056902,0.0,0.0561285318387164,0.0,0.0,0.13897642407542274,0.0,0.14941363323882612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316241521322212,0.0,0.0,0.07039522714593431,0.0,0.0,0.08097710689189153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928359428821274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713705116612417,0.0,0.0,0.07430939427864568,0.07624965428804828,0.0,0.04956948067692702,0.06857179796989779,0.07033776281089123,0.06196931465715989,0.0,0.0,0.23553694298624314,0.0,0.05966364913831242,0.1900177763057232,0.06640503656543771,0.04684500622080343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086075210500997,0.0,0.0,0.07458913685388208,0.05158961652112541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876048842825627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095110170193914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048653260192346365,0.061277568101526736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427944809037726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464397117854901,0.0,0.0,0.08991688812568202,0.21646700279466605,0.0,0.0,0.07949909039612582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026138998621542,0.0,0.0,0.12777659381954548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058052767702856674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13881758803884225,0.0,0.09934606979946403,0.0,0.056045014656814926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067625683141462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0466237881017661,0.08993569823751978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04764691273800244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441665783378358,0.0,0.07729221866018292,0.0,0.4139337371756601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4988910414129698,0.0,0.049853125474915536,0.0,0.0,0.0451929546116771
mentalhealth,ExtraQuilted,2020/02/02,"Overwhelming guilt for no reason? For most of my life, I’ve experienced random moments of overwhelming guilt in the pit of my stomach, for no known reason. The moments generally last 30 seconds to a few minutes at a time. I can never actually pinpoint the cause. I’ve dealt with anxiety and stressful situations my entire life, and they seem to come more frequently over the last few years. I find myself blaming hormones due to a tubal removal a few years back, but like I said, I’ve had these moments my whole life. When I get them, it’s like I’ve done something wrong, or my life is wrong, or something bad is gonna happen, even though it’s never actually tied to anything significant. My stomach gets nauseated for a bit, my heart kinda weakens, and I feel sad. It just comes from nowhere. Sometimes after sex, like I’ve done something dirty. (My husband and I have been together for 15 years). 
I don’t know what this feeling is or how to help it go away. I can say that if I had to live with that feeling all the time, day and night, I’d probably not want to continue. If there are people out there who feel this way all the time, they absolutely need someone’s help.",5.207874818049491,5.985978200873365,5.822515283842794,80.50963901018923,68.30131004366812,8.726754002911209,31.86055312954876,8.841846274778883,2.512695836972344,924,38,181,15,15,300,133,229,0.152,0.753,0.095,-0.8972,0,0,3,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,3,0,8,12,0,5,11,0,13,8,3,4,4,40,29,14,0,4,8,1,4,3,0,1,4,2,0,0,11,10,0,0,10,0,0,4,6,9,0,1,6,7,21,3,24,22,9,31,0,3,0,1,9,5,0,9,24,113,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.2208318777018755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655776342903426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311100517477924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10630609022415292,0.08700368016287052,0.09447369350185647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352810132236294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11623396682517803,0.0,0.1949336356192519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729709756823072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315789833496753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473306006869085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22884372576583725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341504667642644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823011936409468,0.0,0.06430450678475322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005623294750876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408069727816288,0.15168118131231587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218307621187792,0.18446113033101005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31967857190477983,0.16583491103249154,0.0,0.09991158743740804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389766594928229,0.17453312975795052,0.0,0.0,0.1061815529753436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844244343697834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199247421950313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326695827516745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762947600551807,0.08997967835060426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300551487848894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718287691137073,0.0,0.0,0.0958697705489711,0.2613201315252208,0.11190607530456533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961043178974582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111671468877367,0.0,0.19793219028486575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673750872334477,0.08981146340196124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632548690279885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474187316385056,0.0,0.2185904359869032
mentalhealth,everydayisgray32,2020/02/02,"Should I tell my husband how bad my depression is getting? I know that he will blame himself for it, even if I tell him it's not his fault. And I know he'll be excessively worried about me doing something stupid, if you know what I mean. 

It seems like a lot of cons and no pros. He already knows I'm depressed, just not how bad it is.",2.8515492957746464,3.564618661971835,3.908563380281693,92.33185915492956,73.64788732394365,6.806760563380282,26.876056338028175,6.742157984588678,0.8789583098591547,259,9,61,2,5,84,51,71,0.299,0.642,0.059000000000000004,-0.9609,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,5,7,1,0,1,0,6,0,0,2,0,17,15,6,0,3,5,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,12,1,3,11,1,0,0,2,0,0,10,0,0,4,1,40,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457011649415944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3718089478461695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835383501443182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470590351848502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632607622043285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48945316485847296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877614268699777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892901106295936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425324580285216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026933143487787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17140779186237295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3892139713038865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261131281897923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,immajustlearning,2020/02/02,"Helpers also need help Trigger warning: First responder mental health  
In case there are helpers on here - first responders especially - please know you can ask for help.  There are various resources available in Canada for first responders.  If I'm allowed to, I will link you to [a youtube video](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=idINVnsuKe4) that lists various resources under the video available in your province or territory.  I made this music video in collaboration with local artists, first responders, family, and friends.  The video first starts by showing 3 different emergency responders (including dispatch), then the music changes and supporters come to help them get back to their feet.    


We first responders have a lot of difficulty asking for help.  We hide behind our roles so easily: if we are helping others then we must be ok.  Of course, that isn't always the case.  What we see and hear on a daily basis in our careers can be traumatic, on top of all of life's stressors.  So be kind to yourself.  We don't have to always be the person in control, the strong ones, the person who's ""put together"".  Sometimes, that could be a difficult task to ask for ourselves.    
Ask for help if you need.    
Be well.",6.016750921537651,8.622157502369669,5.591145339652454,75.85542785676675,68.76303317535546,9.049078462348604,33.04923644023169,9.586721724236666,3.5581783043707205,967,45,155,23,18,297,126,211,0.078,0.733,0.18899999999999997,0.9729,2,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,8,4,2,9,8,9,0,0,11,1,18,3,1,4,2,27,33,12,0,7,4,0,0,0,1,2,2,1,0,2,7,11,0,1,2,5,0,2,2,1,1,7,1,2,16,8,29,23,4,24,0,0,1,0,38,12,0,5,10,109,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630203664513365,0.1795929484640114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4035552872063762,0.0,0.0,0.08298232969112654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416300209431048,0.09296185626036277,0.0,0.0,0.12103928503055238,0.08616379258550047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275140750026726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10173554610541936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5507702997191917,0.0,0.0,0.08337722840307,0.0,0.0563827341908203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471185536183096,0.12163150116829972,0.0,0.4340112201703052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238005658684136,0.05930894557290936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622571999061202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174807867115753,0.0,0.10211468133374046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875602572854268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003975379171234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312807298418304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884597814633471,0.0,0.11846162688527585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848746130582332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599672466372525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673372457325593,0.0,0.07638496102125394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246413993318545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703129981037467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AgilePreference,2020/02/02,What causes a chemical imbalance in the brain? We often hear that major depression is caused by the lack of serotonin. What causes somebody to stop producing serotonin?,6.450238095238099,10.008395928571428,6.171428571428574,67.44023809523813,71.85714285714286,9.447619047619048,34.333333333333336,9.725611199111238,4.706961904761905,138,7,17,4,3,43,24,28,0.263,0.737,0.0,-0.8205,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,4,0,8,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,2,2,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,14,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043349852100427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8401700065574902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23480790428193996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072634664832144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22792320441287225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AuntieGoldfish,2020/02/02,"Need advice as an empath rooming with bipolar 1 best friend My best friend (20) since high school has bipolar 1 disorder, but it’s never really affected me (19) until we became roommates in college last semester. I’m an empath and have anxiety, and absorb the emotions of people around me. The past couple weeks she has been very manic and irritable, though typically not angry towards me. I feel so on edge and on the verge of tears from the emotional turbulence, even though it’s not directed at me. I went home to my family this weekend to take a breath, and don’t know what to do when I go back. I feel guilty for feeling this way because I know she can’t help her mania, and this also makes me wonder if I should even talk to her about it. The articles I’ve pulled up on living with bipolar are usually targeted towards married couples, and I’m not sure the same suggestions would necessarily hold in this situation. How should I address this with her while recognizing she can’t necessarily control it, if I even should?",8.05107142857143,7.259018290816328,8.489714285714289,69.10528571428571,62.52040816326532,11.717551020408163,36.43673469387755,11.00357731598739,4.025793469387756,819,33,146,19,10,273,124,196,0.084,0.8059999999999999,0.11,0.4949,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,3,12,5,0,0,9,0,13,4,1,4,2,37,26,19,0,7,6,0,3,0,2,4,3,0,3,0,10,12,0,2,6,1,0,3,7,0,0,0,2,3,22,5,24,20,3,27,0,0,0,0,12,13,0,3,10,106,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303590600345325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088723147843146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414788100658216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121194805821755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468441616061833,0.0,0.08299059967475872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28574422682598016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152694277602054,0.0,0.3012759783627059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15602996294848764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062817447734821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26976054621627404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12834209748592212,0.0,0.20651171116242806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21036518277937044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773723563952322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125278309209392,0.14384097792023134,0.1365610328532735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963962480956508,0.11097349960875726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120215445817764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087551376557224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094720316080744,0.10500072384980406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299624741465244,0.0943833798528997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721573614600209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13778247437369656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261766228921295,0.1530287591303121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283117601488778,0.0,0.1023614710181733,0.10942538720513777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675166808208371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994063716669534,0.1123310020161626,0.0,0.10806279220792507,0.10920450581178684,0.0,0.0,0.1262045418863971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476396580496607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671102121319744,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Playthehand,2020/02/02,are there any anti-anxiety/depressant medication that are not synergistic with abilify? Right now im on escitalopram and abilify and I realized that im gaining a lot of weight due to their synergistic properties. Is there any anti-anxiety/depressant that combines with abilify that doesn't cause weight gain? Id like to bring it up in my next appointment with my doc.,5.313184079601988,7.965038850746271,7.0814179104477635,64.18143034825871,70.94029850746269,12.824875621890547,35.04726368159204,11.855464076750405,5.741171144278606,301,16,49,14,6,104,45,67,0.044000000000000004,0.865,0.091,0.4374,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,2,3,1,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,1,0,9,5,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,5,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,9,5,1,8,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,4,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30180820758312643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279592146880551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.382255674767388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4793944347096828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841236034353838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18865706372852195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22354756305958154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236000196412486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18950703182199846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5404449361547019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gradient_4,2020/02/02,"I hate myself 'It is what it is.' I don't like this line. Not at all. I just don't like myself. I try to do something. I fail most of the times. Going back and forth with one thing is tiring. But I still try to do it. But when I complete this one thing, another thing just pops out of nowhere. Now I have to do that thing. It's frustrating. I just want a break. But then I feel like a quitter. Which I still am because I can't do shit. 
I am not good at anything. Just leading an average, monotonous, boring day to day life. Even though I'm pursuing what I like, I'm feeling this way. Idk why I quit tbh. Or feel this way . I guess because this has become a habit. 
Neither can I talk properly. Nor I talk much. So yay good for me because then I feel lonely because I just can't figure out what to do. Should I share what I'm feeling to someone? But why should they deal with my shit. I mean it would eventually become stressful for anyone to go through someone else's shit.
And I pull my hair. Ashamed to wear shorts or half-sleeve tees. Because I have pulled off most of my hair. And now I have patches. So even if it's warm outside, I wear full sleeves and jeans. 
Then I overthink. I'm lazy. My physical fitness has gone for a toss. I doubt myself most of the times even though I can do it. When people give me some nice comments about what I did, I feel that they're just saying it because they have to for some reason or I feel how do they so good in me when I can't see that.

These are I guess some of my flaws. Just wanted to let this out somehow.",-0.2275304878048772,1.9413037469512204,1.4226341463414656,99.46809756097562,89.27439024390246,4.255609756097561,18.87073170731707,5.6839178017228535,-0.4594173170731706,1191,35,282,8,40,384,148,328,0.13699999999999998,0.782,0.081,-0.9485,0,2,1,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,3,3,26,22,5,3,7,1,31,9,7,3,1,54,53,25,0,6,17,0,10,4,0,3,2,1,0,0,28,9,0,0,10,0,0,6,9,11,0,2,2,12,48,11,30,47,10,34,0,2,1,0,10,10,3,14,19,199,76,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892619316012924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596637357372738,0.0,0.0776357260173637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254345351495096,0.0,0.3450613719111678,0.2083874550131373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891617235942683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216860383937906,0.097262833391378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881093829388737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18693672241131476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339163327874031,0.06739820276817253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050179087751728,0.10723387769365564,0.2373896933859333,0.0,0.0,0.20785749754693056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314355141320176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964714577582486,0.06663680081488399,0.1843636520067661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276649039895752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935249176081545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785765313921513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654051154895637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034471556955732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699966156082344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502483344955024,0.0,0.0,0.07517864853037604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905232387467849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987195553772174,0.07262935996244903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068386544916104,0.0,0.1080688577309709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516576350369462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250707494897673,0.0,0.1853817847140176,0.0,0.1100235807509383,0.10843266760916816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810454296505486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129113970150628,0.1497691524821342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17025861665397898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670181076522287,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tough-Place,2020/02/02,"How to learn to trust again Throw away account to start with, sorry about that.

So I'd just like a little bit of advice if that's possible, thanks in advance to anyone who replies.

A few incidents while I was younger caused me to have trust issues among other things ( Generalised anxiety disorder, Social Anxiety, PTSD, Clinical depression, low self esteem )

What impacted me the most trust wise was being cheated on in relationships. I tried to write off earlier cases of this as I was a teenager and young people do stupid things.

However in my first ""serious"" relationship I thought things would be different. We were together for 3 years, my ex enrolled at a college 2.5 years into our relationship (UK college so no moving away, just extra qualifications to get into University).

I eventually found out through one of her friends that she had cheated on me with multiple different men, almost immediately after enrolling. I quickly ended the relationship because infidelity is a deal breaker for me.

Since the split I have socially retreated inwards, I haven't dated, made any new friends, I don't work due to chronic illnesses so I see no one in a day.

Our split was almost 8 years ago and I feel like I have stagnated ever since. I distrust everyone with a major emphasis on women and I want to try and get back into the real world again.",6.9653278688524605,8.18822549180328,7.62225409836066,67.57674180327872,64.57377049180327,11.181967213114755,36.56147540983606,11.080906280650957,4.578816393442624,1076,52,173,31,16,357,158,244,0.135,0.752,0.113,-0.5757,3,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,3,0,0,3,12,16,4,0,11,0,16,3,0,3,1,30,26,11,0,3,3,1,1,2,2,1,3,0,0,3,10,12,0,0,4,0,1,3,4,7,0,3,9,2,25,9,37,14,5,41,0,2,1,0,20,19,0,4,21,124,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546414523458067,0.0956699842927222,0.0,0.21614481778811576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339345548821917,0.0,0.16512635691099656,0.0,0.0,0.07546444525604071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028002654037838,0.0829885164195759,0.0,0.06579075469277074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782735909192975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086984419884648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960341220310774,0.11126708000262624,0.09295660007335066,0.0,0.0,0.22551962731089215,0.12369267190857786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559049896024267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09762534504116373,0.0,0.10312802281741504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05457068384257793,0.07710243427994001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180189371197436,0.0,0.11833540856476273,0.1667668891462035,0.0,0.11277387558512522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264681836372893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054544912076952,0.10817031504943543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212229447025344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147083744253032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423570920487828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462670500615932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748223752486673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216704724049456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261598466396665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284354078432468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4634890060681015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600313612969647,0.0,0.11259047014758372,0.0,0.0,0.1785551863169965,0.0,0.0,0.22003415461210216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081444368317032,0.07639065588440386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936386141151984,0.0,0.0,0.2151039347665423,0.0,0.0,0.08568127557791237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14654948795740286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365761572523068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857149319992994,0.0,0.0,0.07666761172542785,0.0,0.0,0.2085026283037963
mentalhealth,4theyeball,2020/02/02,"I feel like I won't live for long I don't know what this feeling means. It's like I have to rush everything in my life because I won't live long enough to experience things. I don't do anything about it, though. It's a feeling that sits in the back of my mind, and every day that pases by I feel like I'm wasting it.

And it's not like a suicide thing (although I do fantasize about suicide sometimes), it's just this feeling that something will happen to me and end my life young.",3.3104201680672247,3.958732450980392,4.322268907563025,90.02735294117649,72.52941176470588,7.0050420168067244,28.296918767506998,6.868970318607317,1.1856565826330536,378,14,85,3,7,123,57,102,0.027999999999999997,0.747,0.226,0.9465,0,0,1,0,0,3,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,0,8,2,0,0,0,13,17,5,2,0,2,0,5,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,14,3,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,5,12,4,10,14,1,10,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,10,56,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313360268296898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272145113999522,0.0,0.09728980870885576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292787626994772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413569642369218,0.1649079892093953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13446868111126606,0.0,0.14343690636100967,0.15611802887638934,0.0,0.0,0.4034891693330309,0.2280345047601878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113249094674335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771120181106139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254583838814337,0.311887204364711,0.0,0.28185692773147386,0.28247942951193045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17384963382981528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16114906220567718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12286677871110499,0.15784706953831382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34914986974581586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120604003169932,0.0,0.1568047875632062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blacksabath_,2020/02/02,"The drifting feeling of being worthless and superior, egocentrism, how do I fucking change myself? I've been feeling down for two weeks now, had several panic attacks, had intrusive thoughts, been afraid of having schizophrenia, OCD and being a psychopath who secretly hates everyone. In the end, I took sleeping pills, right now I'm only wondering what I'm going to say to a psychologist, and I feel like trash, because I know life doesn't stop because I'm down, and I have to deal with it myself, I don't even believe I'm worth it. Maybe my family was reassuring me too much. No idea. However I feel like I've lost my memory and only the pain defines me. I've always been scared of becoming a complainer and now I am one. I had good grades but now I feel like I was cheating. Has anyone been through this? How do i get my shit together?",4.519519427402867,5.9371950981595125,5.706273006134971,78.34484918200411,70.41104294478528,9.114314928425358,31.37474437627812,9.516144504307137,3.016808179959101,663,29,123,15,12,221,100,163,0.168,0.72,0.111,-0.9079999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,8,18,5,3,6,0,19,6,2,2,0,21,37,9,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,7,0,1,10,0,1,3,3,12,0,2,12,6,19,6,12,23,1,14,0,2,0,1,6,4,2,1,10,80,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880986817584367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983969267374516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624403415565377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740827407400625,0.15769655309551325,0.0,0.16087157320684112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15104926273986327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720668832158396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646652349116205,0.0,0.0,0.09430918564452824,0.0,0.0,0.13643869068682396,0.0,0.0,0.13460647452986707,0.0,0.3609859110044256,0.3060202715380321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200388706843935,0.07460009175078909,0.0,0.08114890066817729,0.11976260402368402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14097218088306368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16118866229465828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847176702015883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085438009842787,0.20927492326062655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586841296521178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14344830566121128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496456131273453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675587806216476,0.21719124786389296,0.15193498221151858,0.16752927980457696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193895424293474,0.0,0.1135496148826538,0.14295427015058532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613081863279637,0.14656836657665587,0.0,0.0,0.14288969301333493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11937596963845792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133565905449823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15864113779899888,0.0,0.0,0.1394817353484313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114534777115618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548459489143057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rk1499,2020/02/02,"I feel too ashamed to see a professional about anything I’m pretty sure i am experiencing some abnormal amounts of anxiety. I haven’t slept over four hours at a time for like three weeks and I have nightmares all the time. I’ve had three panic attacks in the last week which never happened to me before. It was like I couldn’t breathe or control my heartbeat and it nearly made me throw up. It comes and goes but my stomach is almost always in knots and I rarely manage to relax. 
I feel ashamed to see anyone about it though. I feel like this is something I should deal with on my own. If this was any one I cared about instead of me I would immediately urge them to talk to someone professional, but I just can’t do it for myself. It makes me feel weak, or like I’m admitting defeat. I also hate talking to strangers about my problems. Even though I know it’s their job I just don’t even know if I could. 
I don’t know what to do...",2.0004246655031963,4.037517701570682,3.128438045375219,91.53278504944737,78.79057591623037,5.710413030831879,23.17655613728912,6.691623216298621,0.5159317044793483,735,24,159,7,18,236,110,191,0.16,0.75,0.09,-0.9409,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,2,13,15,2,3,4,0,17,4,3,3,3,35,36,13,0,7,8,0,4,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,11,6,0,1,8,1,0,2,6,8,0,4,5,7,28,7,24,27,4,16,0,1,2,0,6,7,0,6,11,111,39,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14174053199899506,0.0,0.0,0.1131964088043206,0.11777982074917714,0.0,0.0,0.0962579397702009,0.0,0.10828433415676116,0.0,0.0,0.09897411121913433,0.0,0.11648248289460457,0.0,0.0,0.16103203045935255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044748042953053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431828818549822,0.0,0.0,0.12193163329071766,0.0,0.0,0.1587588534676101,0.1130150836386892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459304486217862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18698310419423256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862850134849263,0.10112238789800056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517100874305315,0.0,0.0,0.1397499925717758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13939691303590812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14046519944298302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23337431802785186,0.11538104662369865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27661409305893425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13393676050435124,0.09448482680734197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917104945548922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959170323943513,0.0,0.0,0.1660768490746766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400587048321942,0.0,0.13544294691883318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255919044157702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993371661188995,0.10897107058134432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340793281550456,0.0,0.0,0.2275428953298677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27814167104062704,0.0,0.16507631885812446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270835870006831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055210376320227,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TherulerofGin,2020/02/02,I have BPD (Borderline Personality Disorder) ask me anything? I have Borderline Personality Disorder also known as Emotionally Unstable Personality Disorder and I'd like to take this chance to answer any questions in relation to this very misunderstand mental health condition.,11.699285714285715,14.704992261904767,12.627142857142859,29.46785714285716,54.95238095238096,17.98095238095238,49.714285714285715,15.021129683784007,10.218657142857145,233,15,24,13,3,81,31,42,0.221,0.6809999999999999,0.098,-0.7134,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,5,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14831343542493447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612012947269408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15261895132017267,0.0,0.17338139792570206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335821737535078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6376645857110806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20861914190623349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19713682334796528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060708476061907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18690149648829005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4858132909978808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20775924204267365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394439114473791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530250996017454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pinkblackpurple,2020/02/02,"Misdiagnosis Have you ever been misdiagnosed and if so how did you deal with it especially if you knew it wasn't going to go away?

I was diagnosed with atypical autism at 13.  
Borderline personality disorder at 18.  
Bipolar disorder at 19.

I think my borderline diagnosis was just depression/early symptoms of bipolar disorder. I believed 100% I had it tho but when my bipolar fully blossomed and especially after I got on mood stabilizers I have almost no symptoms of that.  
I've also always thought my autism diagnosis is actually social anxiety because I don't think they're that similar and it doesn't make sense that I have no difficulties with people at all unless I don't know them and the make me sweaty and anxious. I also wasn't involved in the entire diagnosis process and I was suffering from undiagnosed depression at the time so I wouldn't call my behaviour strange. My journal often said ""anxiety disorder/unspecified anxiety disorder"" without it really being more than a line in my journal that wasn't looked into. I've multiple times asked to know what my autistic symptoms are but I've only ever gotten that autism is a wide spectrum and some people have bigger symptoms than others but it doesnt answer my question.

I did get my autism diagnosis revaluated when I was 16 but the psychiatrist twisted everything I said and eventually told me I'm not even shy because he has worked with shy people I'm just autistic. Alright.

Problem is that I find that I so often get talked down to or get told I don't understand that I'm sick or that I need help or they feel the need to remind me theyre life long when I talk of my plans for the future. I also get told over and over and over about the option to go to a therapist for autistic people and talk about autistic problems sometimes I do think about saying yes so I can go and be like nope can't relate and hope they'll realize i'm not even autistic.",5.507229092433453,6.920231201634881,6.827261580381472,71.25556853909035,68.04632152588556,10.005826870677007,33.188954097673445,10.214889679676881,3.6889342695451677,1549,70,267,40,26,526,176,367,0.141,0.812,0.047,-0.9852,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,3,3,2,23,8,0,0,10,2,32,10,0,3,3,63,67,35,0,8,15,0,1,1,0,2,10,3,0,1,17,18,0,0,13,0,0,4,16,4,0,0,20,5,42,3,38,43,3,30,0,2,1,0,24,16,0,12,11,188,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.08499643350614512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721745052819156,0.0,0.0,0.2089600351915523,0.0724736639868366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19989236862810228,0.098397510861272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142616549047603,0.0,0.0818327374024655,0.0,0.0,0.10618995081814288,0.0,0.0,0.09813117816417943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889382082700061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979563928345972,0.07501857089272411,0.08840404024998544,0.0,0.0,0.3992937551141929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505664194758206,0.15757275679442148,0.0,0.0,0.07827930918007724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04404006505485892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960725806293427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820233307533666,0.0,0.19800234610890388,0.0,0.06966133321204618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583808804041895,0.0,0.0,0.08650934004347778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573508602930378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061520870000765476,0.042552358941582116,0.0,0.0,0.07708021303848687,0.0731415451240776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162790288919266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291661776259648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624300556950663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24153498116432684,0.07605182159779661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16668469287768112,0.0,0.0,0.09757124251583177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055798095014421976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16570291745568153,0.06926492522203924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878685221685957,0.0,0.0,0.08614351684677428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.362118434504356,0.0,0.21002155420809604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112909677024988,0.0,0.1674293029947131,0.0,0.06914718095378553,0.101576701246518,0.0,0.0,0.24968157886529685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067352935858504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396069699925156,0.0,0.06340938812429686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sly_Shinobi,2020/02/02,"Was I abused? So I'm 18. I've been struggling with severe anxiety and depression for years now and whenever I've tried to figure out the cause I always link it to my childhood with my mother. Some people say I was abused, some people say I'm just whining and it's nothing...i dont know what to think. I just know that as a kid i was scared, alone and I felt worthless. I realise what i went through was not the worst thing a child has been through. Far from it, many kids get severely abused by their parents on an extreme scale and it's horrible. What I went through I dont even know how to interpret it. I lived with my mother and stepdad, and when I was around 7 my mum was going through alot of stress...not sure why. But she isnt the most stable person. Theres alot my mother has done when I lived with her as a kid so I'll name a few things she did and I want to know peoples opinions on it. 

So my mother liked to punish anything I did...and I mean anything from little petty things kids do to things you should punish a kid for, by sending me to my room and forcing me to sit with my back straight up against the wall and sit there all day, for multiple days on end. I was allowed toilet breaks and dinner. That was it. Other than that, I sat there all morning, afternoon and evening like that. No talking, reading, listening to music, playing with toys. Literally nothing. I wasnt even allowed to lay down or the time would be extended. I wasn't allowed to sleep until my set bedtime in the evening either. This would happen very often and each individual punishment of this could sometimes last weeks of sitting there. I got into the habit of talking to myself due to being so bored, and I'd spend the whole time mentally beating myself up and thinking I was not a good enough son. That was at 7, I still converse with myself at the age of 18 if I feel alone because of this. Is this abuse? Or am I just being a wimp? 


On fridays I'd have to polish, Hoover and tidy my room. Bear in mind I'm ranging from age 7 to 11. After everything was done, if there was but one speck of dust or one crumb on the floor or surfaces or cabinets...she slap me, shout at me, call me useless and tell me to repeat the cleaning process until it was done...sometimes I'd be there for the whole of a friday evening, trial and error to make the room perfect...and as a result for not managing to completely clean it perfectly, I'd be sent to my room as the usual punishment of doing nothing. 

My mum would often slap me alot anywhere on the body, I feel like alot of parents do this though...but with my other itd be for any petty things that kids do. I sulk or pull a little face, I get walloped round the head several times. It just made me scared more than anything. 


Often my mother would believe I did things and try to punish when in actuality I hadn't done anything wrong and she would practically interrogate me to tell the ""truth"" which she believed...when the truth was I hadn't done anything wrong. She would hit me, call me mentally retarded and verbally assault me until I told the ""truth""... when in actuality I'm lying that I've done something just so I can stop the hurting. 


Theres is a whole lot of other stuff my mother did to me combined with all this but I dont want to make this too long. Its already far too long...if you've read all of this. Thank you. It means alot to talk about this and get things of my chest.",2.9759372138652718,4.438076458992807,3.990555918901244,88.95901896664489,74.3381294964029,6.666056245912363,25.586003924133426,7.2051791320715415,1.0432964028776979,2669,90,564,28,55,863,286,695,0.132,0.805,0.063,-0.9911,5,2,1,0,5,0,92.0,0,2,1,2,37,30,6,3,37,0,58,6,5,9,9,114,92,50,0,12,20,11,4,3,0,7,0,5,6,8,44,35,1,2,14,4,1,6,12,19,0,2,36,9,75,11,93,40,22,71,0,5,1,0,43,31,0,21,32,397,119,3,0.0,0.2731805430735413,0.1124985633228275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939734332454563,0.06360825475555827,0.0,0.04796191287644439,0.0,0.0,0.03919784298836829,0.0,0.04409519192400922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23716807602044085,0.051312692790797816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044322355648921764,0.0,0.03513740639923172,0.0,0.0,0.06494164581534154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402613454296159,0.0,0.0,0.11771577044063533,0.0,0.0,0.059213164391051426,0.0,0.0,0.06043547085666375,0.0,0.0,0.04602163223483049,0.0,0.0,0.07434732715180661,0.0,0.04964609160543768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3539204103191603,0.20266439779099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0510527995241322,0.059558540737506924,0.0,0.1903566183002864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05180399610546852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05829002280380729,0.04117872762389818,0.05534438010559941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034509900719437,0.0,0.03275869726667779,0.04834651925998782,0.046100757303783664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05097172824516221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059156274895498365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170586124114106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267119006482232,0.046985091933054786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448141379801241,0.11554280956265085,0.1017960827302788,0.10202090687511399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04900429992872488,0.0,0.05454128896955187,0.07695160346915933,0.05843890660290699,0.0,0.1255758504884347,0.0,0.0,0.1161771010586414,0.0,0.05820095819615417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061614977737948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811803960649362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280069738633142,0.0,0.0,0.11988299355184907,0.050329880413261904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531315692072013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167684165923418,0.1154173530456302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19535370161681725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057682607618959165,0.0,0.0,0.044374842481765465,0.11401680617737033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04603216107994871,0.04819044026601228,0.06602754783293635,0.060258867486741134,0.06598513160784336,0.0,0.0,0.05432594149001095,0.0,0.0,0.13898890894951454,0.10076151428506737,0.0530680700672545,0.0,0.0,0.26805874100308497,0.07386802507694169,0.056631970183451,0.0,0.10083275691043406,0.0,0.0,0.05507842653282302,0.0,0.07826888352330155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348339600549152,0.047559845145633946,0.06799628685181615,0.0,0.0462361172997172,0.0,0.0,0.10686753186674304,0.052012018962371495,0.1930622870508813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456789903172405,0.12604272597846813,0.0,0.03711890128144642
mentalhealth,pesceado,2020/02/02,"straight up not having a good time I have decided that there is no way out - always knowing I would kill myself some day it's just so much worse now. I no longer see a reason to live, no life or a future of any sort. It's just about when and how but I don't believe I'll make it to next Christmas.",1.5836363636363655,2.4481252424242435,3.1458787878787886,96.0188181818182,76.87878787878788,5.8860606060606075,20.775757575757574,5.6839178017228535,-0.21629333333333325,230,5,57,1,5,76,53,66,0.18899999999999997,0.787,0.024,-0.7959,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,0,8,2,1,0,3,0,5,1,0,3,0,15,8,6,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,5,1,6,7,2,10,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,3,6,39,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337578305903469,0.0,0.0,0.19104331314696485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165140281178527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811778228066944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356323336794943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31080950362265103,0.0,0.15439281520011838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843049621475886,0.0,0.0,0.2480679984858594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18752421253233406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20651725751448125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987742433317209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28884476356612115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22386633737232853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381363943613034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22299065142136748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862935881737501,0.19956594845765066,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aphroditeish,2020/02/02,Is This A Mental Disorder? Hi I'm in my late teens  and at times I really feel sad out of nowhere. Its like snapping out of happiness because of no good reason.I hide it very well and when Im alone I get these panic attacks. I've got body image issues and also I've self harmed myself  and keep getting suicidal thoughts like I belong nowhere and stuff...I did talk about it to my to my friends but they were like its just negative thoughts and stuff..Every thing gets out of control..I dont even perform that well in school..Is this a mental disorder? How can I feel better cause I hate when this happens..,2.4265188470066508,4.355528089430893,3.448957871396896,90.25130820399114,77.04878048780488,6.423946784922395,25.00295639320029,7.348242739294969,1.0991528455284554,477,17,99,6,11,153,81,123,0.271,0.62,0.109,-0.9598,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,2,9,14,2,1,2,0,5,1,1,2,0,18,17,11,1,0,2,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,10,9,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,5,2,0,5,2,10,9,13,12,0,10,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,7,57,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14149528518638632,0.0,0.10925354979668768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542296036145167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328120543947068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082772296295274,0.0,0.1517520560221019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034455623566253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532289627047474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131526570467277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16011554899573813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023505295357076,0.0,0.11510675172889567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13815656480272967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555090620515802,0.0,0.21413216062048301,0.0,0.0,0.114588890170972,0.10926607946839048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081105029092418,0.14543264707195908,0.0,0.1348822187364699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14757113304949054,0.1425939384045901,0.0,0.12143256074660295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15411131499214453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20023430011849253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27535808735269696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16029205777917405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752113694798391,0.14046629497698254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13826494324952335,0.0,0.0,0.1425226100335013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31279037723760217,0.14943817043818966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098085588950915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907630819648654,0.0,0.0,0.2169192296711594,0.07966318902305848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272434821283668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456723933239382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,new_motivation,2020/02/02,"For a while now I feel like everybody around is ""stupid"" I've been starting to isolate myself. I don't feel comfortable talking to most people or I feel that people in general talk about so much nonsense and stupid topics.

I've been reading a bit and this may be symptoms of borderline personality disorder.

I just feel like I need somebody to talk to whom I can make a real connection with.",5.789200000000001,6.843686853333337,6.465333333333337,75.42600000000003,67.13333333333333,9.733333333333334,33.66666666666667,9.888512548439397,3.4184666666666663,314,14,56,7,5,103,53,75,0.182,0.7509999999999999,0.067,-0.8215,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,2,0,3,0,7,1,0,1,0,16,14,5,0,1,2,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,4,7,3,10,10,3,5,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,3,5,39,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805995450830819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214842370489136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325094721408329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4103137461200617,0.2898643228994539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982265214846649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13541897554084498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14913463742338756,0.1504273953379174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2812925083589291,0.17714045029324774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20292740986018606,0.2309133304581277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435942065290856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210862216051923,0.0,0.4891837158150035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fuckyourself50,2020/02/02,"gonna kill that stupid bitch ass slut horrible person >

twitter .com /star\_shine0303",10.465714285714286,13.165031285714289,5.884285714285718,77.8107142857143,57.57142857142857,8.457142857142857,35.42857142857143,8.841846274778883,3.2915142857142854,74,3,10,1,1,19,14,14,0.764,0.23600000000000002,0.0,-0.9741,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7849773868583536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6195244160814251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pychiticatitsfinest,2020/02/02,"I can't take it anymore (Vent and asking for some help) I don't know where to start. My life just feels like crap overall. I am diagnosed with depression but I think there is much more like anxiety.

I am a student and am extremely busy. I'm always sooo tired and still have tons of homework when I get home.I would say there are aspects of school that I do like such as my favourite subjects but I feel like im losing enjoyment in that too. And my classmates barely help my situation. I've tried being very open with them but can't help but think that it looks like i'm looking for attention. I also cannot stand the culture surrounding mental illness in my class where it is trivialised and relentlessly joked about. There are people outright claiming they are mentally ill just for the ""lols"". I absolutely cannot stand them. I've tried my darnest to forgive them  and tell myself that they are just under educated about the topic but a lot of times I can't bring myself to do that. 

The worst of this however is that assholes and bullies(Usually the same people) get away with a lot of shit and are having thetime of their lives doing so while I know classmates who suffer at the hands of disfuncional families, overworking, stress and mental illness alike.(These people are sometimes the victims of the bullying). Its.just.so.unfair! I get that life is not fair sometimes but it's just been so long and I'm starting to lose all hope that things will get better.

School is also extremely fast paced, even more competetive and stressful. It's not just my school its the general school and parenting culture of my country.I'm cooped up in either a classroom or my room alsmost 24/7.

My home life isn't any better. I won't go into detail because this is getting long (you can ask if you are curious). but I don't trust any of them (Other that then dog) and feel incredibly tense and depressed around them. 

 I know that I get very worked up and breakdown when I get stuck at something, get very afraid when my name is called and get very disgusted at certain behaviours.

​

I would also like to point out my age (almost 14) so I fit perfectly into the ""14 year old white girls who listen to billie eilish"" meme/joke. This is a reason I've always felt that no one would beleive me. I'm not white though, I'm asian.

Anyway, thanks for reading I know its really long but if anyone can maybe give suggestions on what I could do to feel better of offer some help, i'm very open to anything. thanks...",4.280158653846153,6.208860839583338,4.427083333333336,85.24394230769235,71.85416666666666,7.506410256410258,26.68269230769231,8.222332236545338,1.7150336538461537,1993,69,379,31,39,619,235,480,0.161,0.7090000000000001,0.13,-0.9566,2,0,1,0,0,1,62.0,0,2,8,7,29,31,4,3,15,1,42,11,3,1,3,75,83,40,0,7,20,1,6,6,0,5,8,2,3,1,26,25,0,0,14,2,0,2,13,13,0,1,3,12,47,18,44,73,12,43,0,5,4,0,31,23,2,9,22,246,73,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998153381653548,0.0,0.0,0.16766534312230685,0.1163028301420862,0.07572231724244012,0.08492010996719539,0.09505083933487862,0.0,0.05346320975178884,0.0,0.06930892521259717,0.04886647463191757,0.0,0.05751088062644341,0.06221406774532748,0.13066944560551386,0.0,0.0656609479542081,0.0,0.0,0.04260234384949176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18542758260001815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136223533176649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557989220577752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038679470687785,0.07093362962120739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04615957145335902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588305409152523,0.0,0.14134746123645658,0.09985428597577042,0.0671022865093216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286167108598853,0.06704178551086325,0.03971827826902237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873745921946804,0.0,0.14020431472617415,0.06941336015940909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548973528010272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363182757154992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480893382565555,0.20485895849118885,0.0,0.061711323677855034,0.18554285304160711,0.11737461901250608,0.1563709028910181,0.0,0.1188305142358378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021068276413582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112883667551632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05137483835612745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733344390585515,0.0,0.04735710351457279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760101946194091,0.0,0.0,0.14535212004474948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606561422423063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990571110584777,0.0,0.044771272830175866,0.07185526874035099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05557678741319254,0.0,0.2829166856345684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173779461205426,0.0,0.07855568993211473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053802272034413484,0.13823966192039128,0.0,0.09893247171500158,0.0,0.0558116877546786,0.0,0.1601101836804337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05254617513725879,0.0,0.06108414248898255,0.12868474939479485,0.0,0.0,0.046429683699969464,0.08956127746183218,0.0686634249328743,0.0,0.0407515543632958,0.0803245943946342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489709771659242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883196405138173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05087842183453828,0.0,0.0,0.14893673003594093,0.0,0.08492010996719539,0.045004807063451814
mentalhealth,Thalia___,2020/02/02,"you're amazing just the way you are 🌼 things to remember 🌼: 

~ you're allowed to change your plans

~ you don't have to be happy all the time

~ showing emotions is healthy and okay

~ authenticity is better than perfection

~ you're amazing just the way you are",5.625,5.094887055555559,6.507777777777778,80.465,67.33333333333333,9.422222222222222,34.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.7068222222222227,207,9,44,3,3,69,33,54,0.0,0.622,0.37799999999999995,0.9702,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,4,0,3,2,6,0,0,3,1,7,0,0,1,2,7,7,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,4,6,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,23,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967144735176185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35490493057064504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37738215225135296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35713634462399724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38004583557141225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22288527350878548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19562746537033374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5325941855513202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aussiebeauty01,2020/02/02,"I can’t stop worrying about my family and it’s keeps me up late at night/til early hours of the morning I can’t stop worrying about my family and the main worry is their health

And one of them I am worried for a certain reason but I don’t know if I’m perceiving it wrong but it’s making me feel sick with worry and I keep crying about it because I’m so scared but I can’t ask them about it

But the thing is that it might not be true, I might just be perceiving it wrong",1.0901904761904753,2.49461554285714,3.2323809523809537,92.66761904761907,79.28571428571428,6.9523809523809526,19.285714285714285,7.793537801064563,0.3978571428571427,372,8,89,6,9,127,60,105,0.341,0.6459999999999999,0.013999999999999999,-0.9886,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,3,0,6,5,0,1,4,0,11,2,0,2,2,26,19,10,0,1,7,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,9,5,0,4,5,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,0,1,14,2,10,15,1,7,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,3,5,62,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577644719254258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201414533648306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14778553028255914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536640891197439,0.0,0.06802730895361263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14300939747963187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324944921823215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391701136672813,0.0,0.0,0.07393949426395773,0.0,0.15176662872571645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980628676869333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854506966629918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262563836566657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116757481890003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832920729626713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13469769879263854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22496240769166467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938219080971202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6831579217443184,0.0,0.0,0.29419605788635045,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FuckHitler1939,2020/02/02,"How can I focus more?  So I know this isn\`t a big deal,but I just can\`t pay attention. I\`m starting to get bad grades and it really sucks because I just can\`t help it.Often at school I\`m really tired even if I slept well and I don\`t even feel like I\`m in the same room as the other people. As if I\`m on autopilot and everything that happens to me isn\`t really happening to me.

  At home when I try just to relax  or sleep,my mind just makes me sick and some thoughts and memories just pop up in my head constantly.And the thing is that they are not even important. My brain obsesses over things like:\`\`Oh,that conversation was really awkward let\`s think about it for two hours.\`\`There are so many ideas and craps that I think of at the same time and It feels like I have 5 tvs turned on and I can\`t shut them.

 The only times when I\`m really all right is when I don\`t really participate in my own life like reading,drawing,writing and watching movies.

I just want and advice on how to concentrate better and not think about nonsensical shits all the time.",3.8181445523193123,5.9895926699029145,3.938381877022653,87.21015102481121,73.75728155339806,8.072923408845739,22.60949298813377,8.841846274778883,1.478850916936354,854,23,170,18,18,263,121,206,0.10800000000000001,0.799,0.092,-0.5221,0,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,0,0,2,1,19,12,3,2,7,0,7,8,5,3,2,41,23,23,0,3,11,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,2,0,10,11,0,0,9,1,1,0,2,6,1,1,3,3,20,6,22,20,7,22,0,0,1,0,4,15,3,4,10,107,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348201078296656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550915091461796,0.07703067864744283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175920725626592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106466906239132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13027633933895907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25038785150102444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356834170722907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277874628518504,0.18054977072960252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660202805895084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22348757184558316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129686521244054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469951822977145,0.0,0.12675398272465827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426502362502562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944667165199052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921635047238667,0.08925504401552843,0.2469414148563387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843493422776911,0.12811385632420727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275922091927432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610596172898142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760529302838037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4857143365917521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079146658532712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788770714182218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297114314451817,0.0,0.0,0.1264558448212539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944150424444818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16790203174877336,0.2429079726619019,0.0,0.1003193660867124,0.2210526185812393,0.14523750242847427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579325898836691,0.1374483828772578,0.12343983886209604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745331067152429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361693843660067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LittleYellowSparrow,2020/02/02,"Hallucinations when looking at carpets? Hi, I posted it on /askreddit, but maybe here its better. Ill copy my post.

TLDR: I see lights moving in specific patterns when looking at carpets for a prolonged period of time. Its beyond my control, anyone knows something about this?

So hi everyone. Title sounds a little confusing, Ill try to explain this to my best.
Since I was a little kid (5yo? Now Im 26) whenever I stare at a carpet for like 10 seconds without blinking, I begin to see these flashing lights moving from left to right, from up to down, following the direction of this carpet's texture. 
More or less, its like Im looking, from above in the night, at a highway were thousands of little shiny cars move super fast trough the carpet. Its like a lights' party! 
Yeah it sounds crazy, doesnt it? I always remember having these phenomenoms. I remember spending all my church sundays looking at these lights on the (hiper mega giant) carpet of the church. Well that was hypnotic! Like thousands of lights going around trough the carpet (but mind, not casually, always following certain angles).
When I talked to other kids about this, or my parents, or friends growing up, no one understands whats going on and looked at me like I was weird (which I am) or crazy (which I dont think I am).
I called these hallucinations, but actually I dont believe they are. I never hallucinated for anything else in life exept for carpets.
My only explanation its that my brain, somehow, recognize sunconsciously some pattern I dont understand or dont see, and automatically tries to connect those patterns? Like when you have those ""games"" where u have to connect dots in a certain order to.obtain that particoular image.

Thanks for.reading all of.this, and sorry if I did some mistakes (or better, point them to me!) 
Im not english.
Btw thanks! And plz if u know something let me know!",4.778435972629524,7.21925519648094,5.245346041055722,77.70135239491692,71.81524926686217,7.2446138807429135,30.13499511241447,8.131152278815165,2.4250667839687203,1486,64,244,23,30,474,185,341,0.081,0.741,0.179,0.9908,1,0,2,0,0,0,66.0,0,1,2,5,14,20,0,1,13,1,17,4,1,1,5,40,39,20,0,3,14,1,0,6,1,0,3,2,8,2,25,5,0,1,9,2,1,9,10,3,1,4,5,17,30,17,42,33,7,50,2,0,10,0,13,26,0,12,18,167,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.08203539040657044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989775980247224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058780257729736614,0.0,0.06917839706976638,0.07483574299213037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471255651183484,0.08822111383091781,0.14869746150137322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384442996723588,0.08583984452669212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428613410876993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3940945852280121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022558636878105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032778535373357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494847137311717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555224316139367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724141323353678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859990650288995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133695412201034,0.08596223868901147,0.059377651278741964,0.24641970735683835,0.25276588103469794,0.0,0.0,0.352967469438567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08445467080125918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488176536009459,0.0,0.0,0.2680436246341608,0.0,0.0,0.06483617124291874,0.0,0.0,0.07888938175916506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05696467303786694,0.06393528056922773,0.0,0.0,0.09334432161152603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946867173096997,0.0,0.16102221557380528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408782803616374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19045869361772708,0.07179111799869482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20096695165984227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953950191434062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294348094659811,0.0,0.0941039732429895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06756832603652799,0.0,0.15479166017783558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053865508116401284,0.0,0.0,0.049019023500363815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414934070038135,0.0,0.0,0.17502942355658632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558460168002447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103573612466215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alianovna-616,2020/02/02,"I knew I was fucked up but this is just ridiculous 
(This is basically just venting, ignore if you wish)


I’ve been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, PTSD, an eating disorder, borderline personality disorder, insomnia, and previous substance abuse. I’ve been told I had ADHD and schizophrenia but neither were true. I’ve been in psychosis, I’ve had multiple suicide attempts, and the symptoms I display for each of my disorders continuously intermingle with each other that sometimes it feels like even my therapists don’t know what is causing my issues. It’s like they are afraid to put me on any medications, like every therapist I go to doesn’t know what to do with me. My trauma list is too long and the scale of my symptoms are too grand that it’s like everyone just wants to admit me for something  and hope for the best. These people are supposed to be specialists and they either are not capable or don’t want to deal with a comorbid patient. I am not an experiment and I am not a lost cause, I just need genuine fucking help so I can live a manageable life and no matter what I try I just can’t find any.",6.519176342525397,7.096896948113213,7.189811320754718,72.56099419448476,65.36792452830188,10.862699564586356,35.64731494920174,10.727762888450028,3.991363134978229,891,41,160,23,13,295,127,212,0.192,0.6559999999999999,0.152,-0.9159999999999999,0,0,1,0,1,1,20.0,0,1,2,3,9,16,3,1,8,0,24,9,0,2,1,43,39,13,1,6,13,0,1,4,0,0,6,0,0,1,12,14,1,1,6,0,0,2,9,8,0,0,10,1,22,8,18,28,5,7,0,2,0,2,8,3,2,3,6,114,34,1,0.0,0.14450555071567756,0.0,0.0,0.14657515478695016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587728611040842,0.0,0.09330093455707177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799205874129554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505780487490533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573792269004094,0.10504607286608174,0.12378931167637948,0.0,0.0,0.4193385757242376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12479802646137422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08055504290421374,0.0,0.10275861786058768,0.11654034023259037,0.0,0.11930267135722668,0.0,0.0,0.06166787540374725,0.08712999317027316,0.0,0.0,0.1114714627542848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255046253161676,0.0,0.0,0.06931406660210165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174885423629538,0.0,0.0,0.12113622439967305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729710295590865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13405473742302676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614567987607373,0.2383387550473656,0.0,0.10769507103350033,0.10793292352839667,0.0,0.0,0.13313641304411825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228643295484451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043360560769044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455340100845737,0.10649290033243253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256756843975232,0.12260594079492344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389264665196476,0.12062397403660001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340711660433738,0.0,0.0,0.2535313523333551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28321559160063986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11654034023259037,0.0,0.08280449251754463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14387321684908905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402507896501938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JoelC04,2020/02/02,"I need advice regarding my 11yr old son's Anxiety About 8 months ago my 11yr old son (soon to be 12) started having what we think are anxiety attacks. They vary in strength but usually he trembles, gets hot and sometimes falls on the floor. This will last 2 to 3 minutes and the he enters a recovery phase which can vary depending on how strong the attack was. He was hospitalized in December of 2019 and was there for 22 days while they observed him. The diagnosis was anxiety specifically OCD and they gave him medication which as of today does not seem to be working. He is in the process of starting a new school that has doctors on its staff to look over the children that have medical needs like he currently does and we are hoping this will result in more clarity and some sort of solution. I would like advice on how we can help him more as personally I am not sure what really can be done other than comfort and support him. Also has anyone gone through a similar situation? if so has your child overcome or been able to better manage it and how? Thanks in advance for your time and information. 

Sincerely,
A Concerned Dad",6.052478405315617,6.995304762790703,6.535099667774088,75.56191860465117,66.48837209302326,10.235880398671098,33.49667774086379,10.290406445055957,3.5158770764119613,904,39,165,22,14,294,140,215,0.059000000000000004,0.753,0.188,0.9885,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,3,2,3,5,8,14,2,1,10,0,24,3,0,5,1,32,37,20,0,5,5,3,1,2,0,3,3,0,0,3,11,12,0,0,3,0,0,4,2,3,0,0,8,2,17,11,26,23,3,30,0,0,1,0,26,11,0,7,17,113,28,5,0.13609326038314376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26597751792440644,0.1206384639322032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883373115925936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31233291506841143,0.0,0.0,0.09515957198580978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30965146149360695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036342930739402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776889423260467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13929721876735887,0.23819225855517356,0.13927065594272947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711031115080148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122044371201324,0.0,0.0,0.13517131515257474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093417133775968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297658537418774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142840627583582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741992841977252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862834203238518,0.0,0.0,0.20182285628532054,0.0,0.13143971892882314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28561396684315593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883138560479868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718482746853858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773364518015044,0.0,0.12389419294741752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529745267547385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459971441458649,0.0,0.19265502033471232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15443701910469068,0.1282662873135333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12529638945461766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872030660485142,0.0,0.0,0.07935707456241999,0.0,0.12900049787596435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988749920102942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907751442183693,0.0,0.0,0.09667674746978903,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,minkhue,2020/02/02,"Is there any way that i can have an accurate test of depression without meeting a psychologist irl? I’m still a student and my parents dont have any concepts about mental problems and i dont want to talk to them about it cause theyll never understand. Hence, I cant set up a session to meet a psychiatrist and can afford to it by myself. Is there any way or solution? Im really need help rn",2.4397883597883587,4.217994777777779,4.656190476190479,82.29,76.53086419753086,8.085361552028218,27.62081128747796,8.841846274778883,2.2702366843033506,311,13,63,7,7,108,57,81,0.105,0.826,0.069,-0.4026,2,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,0,5,0,10,0,0,1,1,11,14,4,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,7,0,10,13,0,6,0,1,0,0,7,1,0,1,2,42,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4168383550710775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20989520648405327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598243153889534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4789282480089258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369528793557326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207030630421965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059087439946668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150233962539253,0.1575858946806489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268756490786326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955087733867596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089404822064754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16317199146754585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642264635067108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21270664027385305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205145411133249,0.3243629408904633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969593320133719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,figsfallfast,2020/02/02,"I’m feeling so emotionally RAW Every time I think things are getting better, its like someone is just constantly ripping the metaphorical rug out from under my feet.",7.908275862068965,9.7331675862069,7.561551724137932,66.67612068965519,62.793103448275865,9.937931034482759,38.63793103448275,10.125756701596842,4.539399999999999,136,7,19,3,2,43,28,29,0.0,0.777,0.223,0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,6,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,3,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441978856992774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4205650794352739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.437774866071188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32790074664359403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967809883959956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20333037026716905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013358042671347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3297507614471839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258553750296491,0.2493706862051759,0.0,0.0,0.226933857209292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Schmaazy,2020/02/02,"Should I be worried about myself Hey,

The last couple of months, i’ve been feeling my mental health has been deteriorating. When I dont have to do anything important, I sleep way too much and find it almost impossible to get out of sleep. I occasionally mildly wake up, however still not fully concious, and fall right back to sleep and start dreaming often quite intense dreams. However, I also experience quite severe sleep issues, especially the days before having to go to university, where I almost dont sleep at all. I am extremely irritable, and whenever I go out or meet with friends or go out in public in general, I want to snap at everyone and feel angry and feel very unease. I find the most simple tasks extremely daunting, and can’t collect the mental energy to do them. Just by going to university or the gym, already drags all my energy out for that day. I often feel anxious about other people, and have a very hard time trusting people outside of my family. Most things I usually enjoy seem extremely boring or uninteresting, except for the simple task of playing video games, which sometimes can make me feel slightly better. In addition to all of this, I feel paranoid, and often feel either people are malicious towards me, or judging me. It quite literally can make me feel sometimes, that I am going completely insane. I live in the Northern hemisphere, and right now it is very dark, and I did find some benefits when the sun is shining, to sit in my window and take it in, but it only mildly improves my day.

I’ve been experiencing these things, ever since I had a very chaotic end of a relationship with my BPD ex girlfriend. Since then, I started seeing someone new, but I am completely numb to show her any feelings or empathy. However, she still sticks through for some reason, but its very hard for me to show her any affection. I think also, recently i’ve had an exam period and got an internship, which also added a lot of stress to my life and made everything a little more chaotic.

I decided to be very self-reflective about this, since I have a brother that suffers from bipolar disorder type 2. I talk to him very often, and might talk with him about this soon, as he is very good at understanding such things just from his own experience and interest. I have been considering going to a proffessional maybe, but I would like to know if any of what i’m telling seems out of the ordinary for any of you, because I feel like I am suffering and can’t do what i’m supposed to do because of it... I am extremely afraid/paranoid that I might develop mental illness...",9.571056561508307,7.746326905544148,9.713407690871758,64.84954778794102,60.23203285420944,12.879186111629643,39.59016240433078,11.654831186984918,4.653202053388091,2061,85,355,49,22,688,244,487,0.10099999999999999,0.81,0.09,-0.8149,3,0,0,0,0,0,61.0,0,1,1,4,24,16,0,2,18,0,38,11,6,5,4,87,71,35,0,4,16,2,12,2,2,4,5,0,1,0,23,26,0,0,20,8,0,7,5,6,0,0,9,15,50,10,63,56,12,51,0,2,2,0,21,20,0,22,24,254,73,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12586887972304944,0.0,0.06935570420558503,0.1507815544777254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095856594371833,0.0,0.0,0.07100175701444973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05171957316135621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04832718960604311,0.0,0.07662463226327068,0.0,0.05348007804583526,0.0,0.0,0.05558504941414215,0.0,0.0,0.07915642336769463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13179247430597854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954149368202693,0.0,0.12159769003800512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203067925665266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731769306998296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055665776026551636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056850739881967524,0.0,0.06005514651202904,0.05648484845819787,0.12295724198737301,0.05924867432152466,0.0,0.3177846645261398,0.04489951286386885,0.0,0.0,0.17232921272388746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0485571704344714,0.0,0.032836136270084415,0.0,0.21431204423254305,0.052714964465713963,0.05026628225380275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260115653286043,0.0,0.0,0.06680580799269842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06559828256307138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03454030115453572,0.051230522684579935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04439228009812517,0.06140993249761165,0.06299145412733717,0.05549703438854015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05343218020553258,0.0,0.05946947482367498,0.08390471753803495,0.0,0.0631405136623633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19001176861674707,0.1333462329660248,0.0,0.0,0.050165667382455835,0.0,0.046201426270472704,0.0,0.0,0.06070019202411319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047799682575142624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071525813771132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005437235337172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461949092354423,0.06205604680304301,0.06747656797274047,0.0,0.1073458228852712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05008271078664283,0.11443118357021442,0.06556546897580534,0.07100175701444973,0.0,0.15596863367197805,0.0,0.31447316761019706,0.0,0.05325196095308611,0.0,0.12431901982049297,0.0,0.08897003755051451,0.0,0.10038297576544618,0.0,0.07199359728575308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047254810216056986,0.101031684163259,0.054933009928646866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252627362069156,0.04027125816590203,0.0,0.0,0.03664789991691357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542828007344173,0.0,0.0,0.0692195635966281,0.4148576708680448,0.037070112802934437,0.04988680493167292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382645861471023,0.0,0.04464630009487981,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iknowwurds,2020/02/02,"Cutting off my toxic father at 30yo (vent/can you relate?) I'm high (weed) with a lot on my mind, so I appologize ahead of time if this is a long one.. 

My parents were divorced before I was old enough to gaf. I am so very thankful for their separation because at least I got a chance to a experience dosages of a loving healthy household when I would visit my mother growing up. 

As far as I know, my grandfather (father's father) passed away in his sleep when my dad was a young kid and I honestly believe that has damaged him as a person. He used to beat the shit out of me and physically intimidate me as punishment growing up. Things like talking back to an adult, not saying ""yes sir"" ""no sir"", or getting sub par grades would bring a world of shit my way.. Once I remember I was about 8 years old and my dad hosted a small gathering for his friends. It was a nice summer day, no drama, just good music and vibes. His 1960s muscle car (his pride and joy) was sitting in front of the house in the driveway all day that day. Later that evening I get called into his bedroom where he told me that he knows about the scratch. I thought WHAT FUCKING SCRATCH?! I knew nothing about the scratch.. Nope, he wasnt trying to hear that, I got beat. Belts, slaps, and fists.. 

Trips to my mom's was always my escape.. I remember times I would cry when I would get dropped back off back home after a long weekend or holiday with her. My dad would yell at me for crying..

Around my 10th birthday, he introduced his hidden family to the family if that makes sence.. he had a 3year old daughter (my half sister) and a  girlfriend. I was a little weird about the situation, but overall ok with it. Through the years as I grew older, I started to really feel like the outcast of the household. I would continue to get beat and yelled at, while my half sister never recieved any of that treatment for punishment (I'm not saying I wish she did! But it made me feel singled out). I turned to drugs and alcohol in highschool as an escape. I'm ashamed today to say that I grew to resent HER for it.. we are estranged to this day actually. Weddings and funerals is all we ever really speak..

He beat me when I was 17 for not holding a door open for his gf. This time I ran away and I called the cops.. after several months of back and forwarth, my mom was awarded custody of me. Thank God.

.... I learned about a year ago from a ""feelings Doc"" that I have ADHD/ADD... All those bad grades as a kid, ""Not listening"", all that shit was something I had no control over. I'm in tears as I'm writing this.. 

Reminiscing on life is tough, but I'm so thankful for what I do have. Thank you all for hearing my story.

TL;DR 
Just a guy venting about life. Can anyone else relate?",3.3363521188291827,4.737212706422016,4.3452096985583255,87.02159785932724,73.3119266055046,7.0987330712101375,26.921144604630843,7.62386473244151,1.4043988641328085,2115,76,437,26,42,687,271,545,0.079,0.807,0.114,0.9609,1,0,3,0,1,0,98.0,2,2,1,8,23,28,8,1,32,2,31,10,4,4,7,67,68,35,1,9,13,13,6,2,3,6,4,9,4,7,22,22,1,2,10,3,0,11,10,13,0,3,22,15,69,15,75,40,9,82,0,1,0,2,63,29,4,5,41,286,91,5,0.0,0.0,0.07313382753470811,0.0,0.09006725512078441,0.0,0.06643269313325996,0.08009157127609341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06235880994275475,0.0,0.0,0.05096399819111652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05240208171067527,0.07678824354764208,0.0,0.06671540531828632,0.0,0.0,0.14082335121631384,0.23050701578532976,0.0625745058098826,0.045684725986130485,0.0,0.06377120878952637,0.08443540938830038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15305092970505213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405525757420983,0.0,0.0,0.1646433411693521,0.1933288547333277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691040826211323,0.0,0.0626054913198394,0.0,0.0,0.07743643861506769,0.0,0.04949932757066078,0.06779048451920378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733089052734816,0.14129970331839622,0.0,0.11368071774822824,0.053539491975606486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057900989810661566,0.06928385185330349,0.15661907599508162,0.0,0.0,0.06285886498509513,0.1198779694350184,0.0,0.0,0.07420562667385586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16893303950462998,0.0,0.0,0.0791816866924202,0.0751742172093529,0.0,0.0,0.08647447943958539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237373007164295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586930558906077,0.07322699910234863,0.07511285173644427,0.0,0.13264488341826014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637140940042433,0.06763923336275819,0.07091314063404576,0.05002521925976272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756713457194631,0.17554532022279962,0.059819008602992385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057800875234338425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191009539524303,0.0,0.23592108680023804,0.07981214399049393,0.050783503959392726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321564003351058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06543757867242189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960211643999148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16979224676681806,0.0,0.0,0.1787937053274183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466457111582877,0.23078459025254586,0.0,0.08423938321043585,0.07499740001570665,0.0,0.0,0.05769499593747715,0.0,0.0,0.0530452371047699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060236567153200075,0.0,0.2759908016077481,0.0,0.0,0.049788983088570576,0.0,0.0,0.059496590595413526,0.1311000822752816,0.0,0.07103746359243936,0.07161151267995286,0.0,0.050881565593876285,0.08151676473893722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647269289608687,0.0,0.061836052118764015,0.0,0.05948648486289621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618106984554331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31942532199638235,0.0,0.0,0.14478303959163466
mentalhealth,innercaryon,2020/02/02,Those this count as self harm? I've been putting my hand right over the candle long for it to hurt but not to have any injuries,2.93888888888889,4.002543814814814,2.3490740740740783,102.26583333333336,73.81481481481481,5.4,20.907407407407405,3.1291,-0.6848370370370374,101,2,25,0,2,29,26,27,0.151,0.778,0.071,-0.3291,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,5,1,0,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29764801633655064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4685621910423557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38734683137085707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4400049690274702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3737896497603335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4566119673055478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pink-strawberry-,2020/02/02,"What mental illness is this when you want to hurt someone who hurt you first? Basically whenever someone hurts me, I want to hurt them back and it's very hard to control that urge. I feel very vengeful and want them to feel the pain they have caused me. I've seen that normal people just move on from it and get over it and say ""be the better person"", but I can't get over it and I always ruin everything because of this. I've never heard of this symptom before so what can it be?",3.577489177489177,4.498113848484851,4.467128427128428,88.22545454545454,72.13131313131315,6.8692640692640685,24.24386724386725,6.868970318607317,0.7437261183261179,377,10,80,3,7,122,63,99,0.188,0.76,0.052000000000000005,-0.9344,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,3,3,4,7,0,0,2,0,6,3,0,2,1,16,15,8,0,4,2,0,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,13,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,2,6,11,1,10,11,0,8,0,5,1,0,9,3,0,0,4,54,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243530337558866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491658813420075,0.0,0.09110235230429976,0.0,0.12716957373845844,0.0,0.0,0.13217495745180724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15352466548367485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676190788772405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343145777564891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15113119428798338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712072543027322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561612325661052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387640409264898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6399503760930499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15060882795504235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883998880918446,0.0,0.0,0.1152638126951714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464276927329779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15902362540867146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036086973311103,0.13049257092983724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884735930833636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532542742116796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533410149419205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466211489126996,0.2644456000725409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idkhowbutilostme,2020/02/02,"What is this feeling? Since around halfway through November I’ve been feeling off and I didn’t really know how to properly word what I was feeling until about a month ago. I’ve decided the best way to explain it is that I don’t feel like me. I know I have to be me because who else could I be but I really feel like a different person. 
It’s similar to how I imagine Wanda feels from The Host, where she’s in control of Melanie’s body and what Melanie says and feels, but she knows that they’re two different people. The big difference is that I don’t know who I am if I’m not me.
It’s not a matter of feeling like I’m a guy in a girl’s body or anything like that, I just feel really disconnected from my name and even my own thoughts. I thought I’d reach out and see if this is something other people have experienced and if anyone knew what I was feeling.

If anything’s confusing lmk and I’ll try to explain better, thanks.",4.39976923076923,4.480649451282055,5.633653846153848,83.61509615384617,69.87179487179486,9.166666666666668,31.121794871794872,9.075114841892004,2.3945641025641025,733,29,159,13,12,246,102,195,0.019,0.81,0.171,0.9729,2,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,7,8,0,1,8,0,16,2,2,3,0,48,39,17,0,5,10,0,10,4,0,0,0,1,0,3,16,9,0,1,21,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,7,13,20,7,17,29,2,11,0,0,1,0,11,7,0,6,7,101,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936487599305348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837897434798141,0.0,0.1844881944647434,0.09978773497832023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833167403408752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763610240867925,0.09913834143270532,0.0,0.249023101223996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12572334270223912,0.08949821556709579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3513442063476608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364044400550654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403725957537262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5667827033694179,0.2402406735287277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11099102783088816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464164882563269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21905454504313746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947263902037837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542421362465125,0.09787646087187626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154315287391828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914192455693623,0.0,0.0,0.08932468234126256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927256029018424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629570541792396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032014151600284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798078228332187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610470413153693,0.0,0.10949988991464046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897527576983058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ResearchClass,2020/02/02,"Help with an academic survey which focuses on exposure to violence and burnout on adolescent inpatient units Hey Everyone, 
As a heads up, this post only really applies to inpatient mental health workers and/or residential counselors. I was recently sent this survey (https://williamjames.co1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_77is6d3CdImrIMZ) via a mental health email listserv that I am a part of. Unfortunately, I don't meet the participation criteria, but it seemed pretty interesting and I figured I should pass it along to another community. The topic is burnout, and how exposure to violence on inpatient units impacts mental health workers/direct care staff. I thought that some individuals who are members of this sub might meet the criteria, and might be interested in helping this guy out. If you're able to participate, I'm sure it would be much appreciated. If not, feel free to pass the survey onto other individuals who qualify.  

Thanks everyone. Much love.

PS Just as an fyi, all the information regarding how the survey-info will be used/protected, which organizations this person belongs to, and any conflicts of interest (there do not appear to be any) is explained in the title page of the survey, before you begin taking it. Again, this isn’t my survey, but I’ll try to answer questions on it. Thanks!",9.202992889463477,10.713128565610862,9.094030381383323,57.97901583710407,59.72398190045249,12.468131868131865,38.41014867485457,12.031772070788634,5.4562266321913375,1067,50,150,34,14,347,136,221,0.068,0.7390000000000001,0.193,0.986,0,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,0,1,0,3,5,9,0,0,13,0,17,5,1,2,2,34,30,13,0,4,7,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,18,8,0,1,8,0,1,4,4,0,0,0,3,1,8,10,26,18,6,17,0,0,0,1,16,9,0,8,3,103,26,6,0.13531671689869154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184040015398104,0.14189137615017244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514455953365435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796441126464626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586018437344134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842019787639783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339848241936294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887399041182796,0.4315060271050698,0.0,0.0,0.18139988596643813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212862011842528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4091022714072085,0.2870993054121146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989467133230733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291446080624972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653481788348424,0.0,0.0,0.11815333778685352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959600979354902,0.13766574832382658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158569161202154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668735382786615,0.0,0.1336089332070949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318725692410586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12753440426945173,0.0,0.10174133073461432,0.0,0.0,0.24916290509208305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10742635819360843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187116835163164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961251132585552,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,butterfly_mirage98,2020/02/02,"Opportunity for Graphic Designers interested in Mental Health Hey!! I own a mental health nonprofit with over 150 members. We're looking for graphic designers, please PM me if you're interested and want more information!!",8.381666666666668,11.459502722222226,9.084444444444447,51.30500000000001,63.444444444444436,12.577777777777778,42.55555555555557,11.855464076750405,6.767788888888887,182,11,23,7,3,61,29,36,0.0,0.6759999999999999,0.324,0.8994,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,5,2,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,12,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6457024537391834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550570511915464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6121776380508969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334047858980481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914806748433615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shikkakun,2020/02/02,"PLEASE ADVISE ME: About CBT, DBT and increased libido and my miserable life these last years I'm gonna start saying my native language's not English, so sorry if I mess anything up. This ended up being very long, so I'm highlighting the parts that actually require medical advice, but I would really appreciate it if you could read it and help me with anything at all.

And then I'm going to actually start by saying that I'm not 100% sure that I'm BPD as of now. I've been diagnosed some years ago (after much arguing with doctors that never seem to be by my side), but my recent behavior (and if I look deep into it, pretty much all of my life) has given me strong feelings that I'm bipolar.

I don't really know how to start this, and it's probably going to be long, but I really would appreciate some help. I'm going to try and sum it up. We're in January and I've already been to the hospital because of a suicide attempt. I thought this year was supposed to be different. After being admitted to a mental institution sometime last year and having to drop college because of it, I changed psychiatrists. My last psychiatrist didn't take me seriously and, honestly, I'm sorry, it's hard writing this because I'm so emotional about everything and it makes me really mad, so I'm just going to use some bad words if you allow me. She was a fucking bitch. I was literally almost dying because of depression but she wouldn't change my medication or give me what I asked for, for almost 1 year (Lithium), because she was afraid that my ""perfect skin"" was going to be fucked up. Honestly. After being to the mental institution, and let me make a little pause here, because, I live in Brazil, in a not-so-poor-but-still-miserable city, and the mental institution was literally fucking hell. I thought I was going to die, I swear. It looked like a prison, it felt like a prison, it smelt like a prison. Fuck. It makes me teary just thinking about it. I don't want to ever go back to that absolute shithole.

But the shithole had a very good and kind psychiatrist, and we decided to switch psychiatrists and stay with her. I've been with her for around 6 months, and I wanna say I'm better but things just keep getting worse for me, so I don't really know. But I can see she's very smart and she actually knows what she's doing. She's prescribed me Lamictal, Lithium, Pamelor, and I don't really remember all the names but I'm also taking Xanax for 5 years now and she didn't try to change that yet because I'm obviously addicted and the withdrawal would probably fuck me up and I don't have the strength for that right now.

**My new psychiatrist recommended I start a new therapy, which was initially only EMDR because I have an awful lot of trauma and repressed memories. I went to the therapist and it turns out she's also a CBT therapist. I mistook CBT for DBT (which is the one that's good for bipolar or BPD folks like me, correct me if I'm wrong). So, the first session was absolutely fucking disastrous shit. I thought the therapist was honestly a bitch and she wouldn't help me or give me advice, it was a really strange and uncomfortable experience, but everyone's telling me I should go some more times before I decide it's bad. The therapy actually made me feel like a fucking mess yesterday and I felt really bad, and some repressed memories and events came up to my mind, and it was 2 or 3 AM and it was unbearable. But maybe that's what's it's supposed to do? Please enlighten me. I need to know what to expect, what to tell her, how to react, I don't know. Please just help me if you have any advice or experience with similar events.** I'm honestly so lost. I've been in this hole for 5 years and it's gotten to the point where I don't even know if I can kill myself, so I don't try anymore, but if I had a chance I'd probably take it. I'm so afraid of going back to that absolute shithole or having to spend the rest of my life bedridden by this goddamned sickness. Sorry. It's just really hard to write this. I'm at my limit.

​

**So, second part. I had an OD on Xanax, Lamictal, and Klonopin (a lot) and almost died some weeks ago. I couldn't eat afterward for an entire week because I'd throw everything up and I had to go back to the hospital. My dad is a doctor and he discussed some possibilities with my psychiatrist, and it probably was either a serotonin syndrome or lithium overdose (even though I didn't take lithium on the suicide attempt, I got dehydrated and the proportion of Lithium in my body got messed up). Nevertheless, after that, my psychiatrist changed my doses and I'm also taking Pamelor now. I've been having an unwanted side effect. I searched a little bit about it, and it seems that there are no psychiatrical meds that can increase your libido. But that's what happened to me. I usually masturbated once or twice a week, but now I have to do it at least 6 times a day or I go crazy. I feel like I have even less control over myself, and my sexual parts literally hurt when I touch them because it's been awful, and I also have some bad memories of having sexual relationships and it makes me feel extremely uncomfortable watching porn. Can someone give me advice on that too? I'd really, really appreciate it.**

I'm really sorry this is so long and probably very confusing. I'm desperate. I'm 20. I've had this fucking shit since I was 15 and not all meds in the world seem to be able to control it. It just got worse. And it's not like anything really bad is happening. My trauma is just, in the past. But it just gets worse. And I feel like sometimes I'm really happy and up and I could do anything in the world but all of sudden the depression creeps in and it's so unbearable and it lasts so long. And I've been in this cycle for 5 years and you could tell me all the names of meds you know and I'd tell you, I've taken every single one. And it always changes after some time or a crisis and I always hope it's going to be the last time, but it never is. I'm really fucking tired, so I'd just really appreciate some help. I'm really sorry. I've lost all good opportunities that were given to me, I've lost a scholarship for college in Japan, I dropped out of college in my city because I literally couldn't take it, and I've hurt so many people. And I keep thinking the longer I'm alive the more people I'm going to meet and therefore hurt if I die. So isn't now the best time for suicide? Because things will just get worse with time. I'm sorry this ended up as just meaningless venting but I could really appreciate some advice. Thank you so very much.",3.282042929292928,4.9993755628787895,5.053030303030308,80.60398989898991,74.05303030303031,8.494949494949495,26.767676767676768,9.125720136006244,2.2628055555555555,5213,192,1024,119,108,1776,403,1320,0.198,0.688,0.114,-0.9993,1,0,0,0,0,4,163.0,1,8,1,17,59,70,17,6,54,2,90,31,4,14,14,226,210,123,9,27,52,1,11,8,0,8,16,3,0,0,79,72,1,8,28,1,2,18,23,43,0,5,49,18,125,27,118,137,37,131,1,9,4,10,51,43,14,40,75,662,204,10,0.031047751827389062,0.0,0.12119250836594796,0.03384663231214738,0.0,0.15169751876274246,0.05504391736166222,0.0,0.09326951585001186,0.0,0.034261966192781206,0.09931550367647704,0.05166843340785928,0.03364022613336235,0.037726416816063015,0.02111353591540044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03079102703298273,0.0,0.0,0.1021986172561573,0.027639081632015026,0.02902545682019152,0.0,0.0,0.07162141407574553,0.1296178795520483,0.2271170560699516,0.0,0.026419350030132856,0.0,0.032582700048778036,0.027459213422535628,0.033896103698286384,0.03448705306560424,0.07820711309703737,0.0,0.0,0.03551035687507057,0.0,0.0,0.16422202324199836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964538743668115,0.0991564138224426,0.0,0.0,0.020023231412242555,0.0,0.053482766308427576,0.03151281455475823,0.12889065835592328,0.032438292482498944,0.0,0.06355737920244801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03176960119916,0.0,0.03492454189266375,0.05499818531618514,0.0,0.0,0.0615202417910074,0.028084469045211096,0.026159069993131383,0.029667457393244487,0.05580743474372516,0.06074131776733874,0.0,0.0,0.07849338102245196,0.06654156032736269,0.059621421383921375,0.0,0.0,0.02640920184362577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583283164085213,0.04866350664333359,0.08935149796389694,0.22938698716994896,0.07812414354661742,0.07449517020740892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05491084880837024,0.033050909150854985,0.05562537447476828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405326795689326,0.0,0.0,0.030837423067268513,0.0,0.0,0.09971178142829087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519333676441745,0.034349737289870085,0.03233145577145103,0.1194412270483328,0.12654030813778705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03174842979304951,0.06578983592037232,0.12134690608272795,0.06223600773622194,0.027415733684766786,0.10990513340586804,0.05214458391779029,0.0,0.1016768662317123,0.05279137665106801,0.0,0.029378133482308836,0.08289846173810503,0.031477547215629856,0.03119163981209385,0.0,0.1034611591968127,0.0625546871538771,0.09386649399853264,0.0,0.03134937862651952,0.0,0.0247820192957914,0.0,0.06847100997972731,0.023021514575374064,0.04789188048493837,0.0599722243713595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03306484240716686,0.04207752032074344,0.02361321433000934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008650689432016,0.029638592245589807,0.043049203681161545,0.0,0.0,0.1022433241247511,0.02935016099714622,0.035001675174946685,0.0,0.031586725476719715,0.16737363856033832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031056153789971338,0.0,0.35801972718745595,0.0,0.030655909300857383,0.0333336661658576,0.03517105042293001,0.0265146104185564,0.0,0.07407125525595007,0.0,0.0,0.024741038440449083,0.08479412157493979,0.0,0.0,0.06374014216526483,0.025683021150230863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02630665936958388,0.0,0.061414040892492715,0.2085324975232856,0.08790303418131057,0.033092772413167444,0.02479477471536893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188360373538627,0.0,0.029262138662264087,0.0,0.14006427260284035,0.0,0.10854841432877856,0.028584598485647605,0.07101162010604331,0.10814649863058523,0.041253493444124524,0.03978829143543727,0.03050425853236353,0.07394534065024179,0.10862516261974106,0.035684823416783085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323815638852501,0.033771038401826235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026815288984667743,0.03419471224453032,0.1280882342060509,0.018312768447306,0.0,0.07471390123323343,0.0,0.0,0.02878157699810469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656124638301933,0.06616629628397701,0.033945842665514266,0.037726416816063015,0.1599498738904758
mentalhealth,reddit_throwing_away,2020/02/02,Dreams > Reality Anyone else have it where your dreams feel more real than reality itself? Except in my dreams my mind cant hurt me and I can sleep for eternity.,5.704374999999999,6.236885687499999,6.875000000000004,74.27000000000002,67.125,10.15,25.375,10.125756701596842,2.2755125,130,3,25,3,2,44,28,32,0.0,0.705,0.295,0.8713,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,5,4,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,4,4,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,17,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651391608111466,0.3885259857956395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167654201670806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19173036083178946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4059318034930519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3828748104375652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4316023685606901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794648428848857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ley330medley,2020/02/02,":( I don’t even know what to say or why I’m writing this but this must mean I have SOME hope, right? I am unwell. I can’t handle emotions, I don’t even know what I’m feeling and I act without a brain. I don’t want to go to therapy I don’t even want to be nice I don’t know what the hell I want really but I really really want SOMETHING. It feels like I’m missing. Like I’m in the passenger seat and I don’t know what’s driving me anymore. I don’t want to be me I never have been and I have felt more and more fake daily and I hate myself so fucking much. I don’t know what to do, especially if I feel like nothings worth doing. I am an asshole and I don’t care about other people. The small amount of apathy I feel is in guilt which I have so fucking much of because I’m an asshole.",-1.9003911342894424,-0.015942836158192364,1.331666666666667,97.64044654498049,98.83050847457628,4.304997827031726,16.412212081703608,6.093298490706669,-0.4600306823120381,606,17,148,7,26,214,82,177,0.187,0.669,0.14400000000000002,-0.6808,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,6,13,4,1,6,0,23,3,1,0,2,32,51,12,0,8,5,0,5,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,10,6,0,0,11,0,1,3,12,7,0,0,2,6,25,6,12,46,6,8,1,1,0,2,2,4,3,4,4,97,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492120500187102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293245856065824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15187247505547066,0.0,0.0,0.13870809728219918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303358576669274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695715588037377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751560457110045,0.19438276595874407,0.1306256203865206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515449112901008,0.0,0.0,0.07731815128020678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431738838196902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351245047763943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738369776874306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19939580256278328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819411965874685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20001911951522286,0.0,0.10492716299966068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13053993162330665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431725724529448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26146390502461386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618265230304828,0.0,0.10818934365119652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473495805129253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558060703170942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40121766370185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276047236506787,0.0,0.0,0.1311436152096748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,duvet321,2020/02/02,My boyfriend suffers from social anxiety My boyfriend has just told me he has social anxiety and has been seeing a councillor for 2 years. I really want to help him but when he said i couldnt think of anything to say. What sort of things can i say to him? What can i do to help him? He is 27 i am 23 we have been dating for 8 months.,-0.05249999999999844,1.98118652777778,2.0144444444444467,96.65000000000002,86.5,5.822222222222222,18.72222222222221,7.1686216300943375,0.1499388888888884,258,7,62,4,8,86,48,72,0.069,0.8220000000000001,0.109,0.5905,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,12,0,0,0,0,8,17,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,4,12,0,9,12,0,4,0,1,1,0,15,0,0,1,4,41,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3753389572991061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20187783400865095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32886626329212965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19581244882228746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15715856697576738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333559330682156,0.3901773487702692,0.0,0.0,0.19548864302003904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5001466253313606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16298001138147852,0.15719144367204432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344142102854644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446963619704499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579783315953851
mentalhealth,seethroughtop,2020/02/02,"Have I ruined my life? Where to go from here I went to a 'networking event' the other night, only had 4 glasses of wine but I'm pretty small and a lightweight (25/F). Headed home with a friend - we live in college campus accommodation.

He made it back to his room but I was stopped on the way in and deemed 'incredibly intoxicated'. I had honestly been fine up until that point but I guess it all hit me pretty hard on the way home.

Campus security basically decided I needed to go to hospital to be checked out, but I insisted I was fine and just wanted to head to my room. They eventually relented and escorted me to my room, but not without telling my roommate about the incident and instructing her to take care of me. (For context, it's a building housing only grad students and professors, so drinking is not forbidden).

Obviously my roommate was furious and kept asking me what drugs I had taken, not believing me when I told her I hadn't. Once I thought she had gone to bed, I decided to avoid the tension by heading to a friend's room on a different floor (he invited me over). Unfortunately he had changed room recently, so a Resident Assistant then found me on a different floor waiting for him to text me back, she definitely did not believe me that I was meeting someone so brought me back to my floor. FINALLY got in touch with my friend, went to his and vented/recovered from the incident.

The next day I got an email from the Residential Services with an 'account' of the night before and checking that I was okay. I responded but they are out of office for the weekend. I also emailed the Resident Assistant in question and she was super nice about everything.

ANYWAY I'm completely freaking out. The past two days I haven't left my room because I'm too scared to face my roommate, let alone the building security guys on front desk. I'm literally petrified but this can't go on forever. I can't believe this all escalated so fast over a few glasses of wine.

WTF do I do? Will I face major repercussions for this?

TL;DR - got in trouble with campus security for being drunk, scared to face them ever again.",5.0364532019704455,6.387272004926111,6.34931034482759,74.47672413793106,69.09852216748769,10.033497536945816,33.950738916256164,10.245366335075165,3.7254798029556655,1678,81,307,45,29,567,205,406,0.11800000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.125,0.6306,2,2,4,0,1,0,45.0,1,0,3,1,18,21,1,4,24,1,26,13,6,1,4,48,54,25,0,2,13,0,2,0,3,1,3,0,9,1,11,18,4,7,5,5,3,8,9,8,0,1,27,2,53,13,57,22,4,60,0,1,0,0,27,30,0,2,20,213,64,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10077188568273393,0.0,0.07780956246027597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096094816155688,0.0,0.0,0.22444958483717334,0.0,0.05931225272284955,0.0,0.08279384346782125,0.3288662172505888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920228898905684,0.0,0.10292889469846313,0.0,0.10201560923839917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549894568748668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20331241359808086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531547234937468,0.1128353511555145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801204917433716,0.0,0.0,0.08744560353003875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658573325275864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668276555924812,0.2255177020167989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165890912016346,0.0,0.2334554579967424,0.0,0.10718524959684383,0.09634079635441756,0.0,0.0,0.08716033024752927,0.0,0.2995689454319722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19519662526671025,0.0,0.0,0.1122693869315243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571508750107053,0.09949429201084836,0.06872479667052529,0.0,0.0,0.08591634391698323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09206617809055936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721455929828604,0.0,0.0,0.10347804150597767,0.18261607201034896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361970992567164,0.0,0.1479997629601848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288241248134912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197851698022476,0.0,0.0,0.19797507522310706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899656982594064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607051472212727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19482551257950695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244068970366218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134588931827373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731563509831957,0.0,0.08504316357486769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724412790862352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297287104728172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950464807945648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738916674934884,0.15446201537263118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18039333882326716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379226642141683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HiKaruAruru,2020/02/02,"I have a fearful-avoidant attachment style. Please recommend me books. I searched but couldn't find what I was looking for. I am looking for a detailed description of this struggle but most of all STRATEGIES how to HEAL, exercises and similar.",5.523372093023255,8.384812906976748,5.0676162790697665,77.87723837209303,71.09302325581395,8.951162790697676,40.98255813953489,9.516144504307137,4.660074418604651,197,13,32,5,4,60,35,43,0.087,0.7859999999999999,0.127,-0.1122,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,4,2,0,1,1,8,6,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,5,4,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,24,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3745729160547675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6883000999787801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4498651309480759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4284384050064842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chalk11,2020/02/02,Do i have ASPD or am i a narcissist New and grammar bad so dont expect the best. Very social but dont really get emotionally attached to people. I am very open to family told them did drugs was treated like out cast then proved them wrong. more but wanna see first opinion like to put my self in situation i think are not bad to the extreme to prove people wrong and i enjoy it. At the same time fam and people learn also weird emotionally detached,1.753,4.235129411111114,3.653333333333333,84.90000000000002,82.66666666666667,6.266666666666668,20.11111111111111,7.554174236665415,0.8539111111111111,357,10,69,6,10,120,65,90,0.204,0.6920000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.8585,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,2,2,2,10,0,0,4,0,9,1,0,0,2,17,13,9,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,3,1,8,5,9,10,3,9,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,2,6,45,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278194061528686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266909874536512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16773620298633254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746491427795469,0.0,0.18535700653902776,0.0,0.0,0.3595840761718715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15067752272525006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595494647520998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835068079700071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15617389933910067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15436893175882616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3324268686873648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067758558423967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239392469474118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736721756413988,0.0,0.16674199979533585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17966041371580088,0.0,0.16293090754131384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241534493308754,0.0,0.0,0.0932006468633733,0.0,0.0,0.152728492357964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637600201429939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34950736110639496,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoBrightSide,2020/02/02,"The story of my life has been that I half-ass things because I'm afraid of putting in 100% effort and failing. Is this fixable? I listened to a talk between a psychiatrist and one of their clients and client's problem really seems to resemble my own problem.  I apologize if this isn't the correct place to post this. 

I'm 26M.  So, I've been in college for about 8.5 years (5.5 years at community college, 3 years at my current university) projected to graduate this May.  I don't remember exactly when but probably during junior high, and moreso in high school, a habit manifested in me where if things got ""difficult"" for me in my classes, I'd default to half-assing those specific classes (AP/honors) and just spend my time after school playing video games, maybe because if I failed in games, it'd be okay because I could keep trying and getting better and essentially it feels like theres no ceiling for what I could accomplish for putting my all into video games.  So, fast forward to college and basically a shit show happens during my community college years, extending my time there to 5.5 years(from 2-3 years).  I get into my first semester courses, get mediocre grades because I refused to do homework in my tougher classes and, again, would spend all my time after class playing video games.  Then, it got worse to the point where I was failing my hardest classes (which were multi-variable calculus and calculus-based physics during that period) and re-taking them multiple times, putting in the same low amount of effort.  I'd always tell myself ""I'm going to work my ass off and get an A"" only to fall back to the same vicious cycle.

I transfer to university and the deep regret I had in my failures as a student (and as a person) essentially fueled me to work harder and my grades drastically got better.  However, I still fall back to the same stupid cycle a few times here (failed basically the two hardest courses of my degree because I refused to try).  I want to change.  I realize this is my problem now and I want to be able to put in 100% effort, regardless of the outcome.",9.393307888040713,7.695026715012723,9.168765903307891,68.21462468193386,60.47582697201018,11.88854961832061,42.189567430025456,10.62613485830676,4.554057506361323,1661,80,287,31,18,541,197,393,0.14400000000000002,0.789,0.067,-0.9883,2,0,0,0,0,0,59.0,0,0,2,14,15,20,3,1,18,1,18,3,2,0,4,48,36,26,0,13,5,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,1,1,15,18,0,3,4,10,2,8,3,14,0,3,8,2,40,6,50,21,8,55,0,6,0,1,13,24,2,5,25,186,55,27,0.09607055520033833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993839797839845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477446537351821,0.0,0.2928185937773568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993319796768186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016299089009331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15340904199049127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048576159306493706,0.0686328238309263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171756517574191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20077159970495087,0.0,0.05459911046716567,0.0,0.23050919761784644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495487468577832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20300763241730094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853919236374342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785747428185415,0.04693522055970125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651578545900888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509989452926009,0.07306598633487445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388510318687678,0.10037328260900052,0.0,0.09081772741199703,0.0,0.09200903552763573,0.0,0.1035803073394037,0.2757796401445217,0.0,0.38630977136694655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154525768849633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882921120650192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944570616497974,0.0,0.08745902529667425,0.0,0.0,0.09861504434217264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672206948238545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721787318207947,0.0839698997262234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765001605154375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800975665812843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304512014883262,0.0,0.09384697283308277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133298051188316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13988101676127287,0.0,0.0979041032862923,0.0682457660154338,0.0,0.0,0.30933143876069696
mentalhealth,arctic_explorer577,2020/02/02,"Why do I feel more comfortable talking to women about my problems than men? I hope I don’t come off as sexist towards men or anything but hear me out:

     So I’m a 21 year old straight male and I don’t know what’s wrong with me.  When I was young I was diagnosed with ADD.  But now I’m starting to think that there might be other things I have as well because of the other problems I’ve been having, including anxiety, compulsions, panic attacks, etc.
     
     Anyways, for some reason I’d rather talk to a female about this than a male.  I hate to sound sexist but I can’t fix the fact that it just feels more comfortable opening up to a woman than a man.  I’ve had a few friends in high school that I hung out with a few times and they were all females.  I still talk to a few of them on Snapchat but I haven’t hung out with any of them for awhile because of my anxiety and social awkwardness.  I also have one sibling(my sister) that I’m pretty close with.  I don’t know if me being more around women has anything to do with it but I think it’s a possibility.
     
     So if I see a psychiatrist or someone that I can open up to, I would hope it’s a woman because it feels much easier for some reason.  I’ve never tried talking to any guys because it seems like they lack any interest in the “emotional stuff”.  I’m not saying that men wouldn’t care or anything but I just don’t feel very comfortable talking to one about my mental health issues, even if he was a professional.

     Anyone know a reason behind this or not?  

I would also appreciate it if there’s any advice you could give me on seeking help for my mental health issues.  Thanks!",3.5180220883534155,4.570267990963856,4.697168674698798,86.02488955823297,72.40361445783131,7.461044176706826,25.58032128514057,7.793537801064563,1.274108032128514,1271,39,266,16,24,419,158,332,0.10099999999999999,0.735,0.16399999999999998,0.9740000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,4,0,19,18,2,2,16,0,26,3,0,3,3,65,50,24,0,14,19,1,4,1,1,4,3,3,0,11,20,18,0,0,13,0,0,1,10,7,1,2,6,8,33,11,45,37,12,27,0,0,1,0,29,17,0,14,10,189,53,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931493534398684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461849518348653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486202952490325,0.0,0.13984136370033315,0.0,0.0,0.06390894302344467,0.0,0.2256430172752532,0.08136529882177908,0.0,0.10398059384226904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228661499525509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318830089281953,0.0,0.0,0.07873293034659272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297539176748362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927689858549139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281259794170516,0.0,0.0,0.10193506139738708,0.06036877929541739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18485816533139127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061534462011232,0.0,0.0,0.08767912321641579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905002819029677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023848966950647,0.0,0.19430766298031346,0.10301434259890588,0.0,0.061263433810250185,0.0965690243236125,0.0,0.1815614698178378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907955215771921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069300254644602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04465337979556315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842192258828327,0.09696086191221794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06718945129706379,0.0,0.0704932460975884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590883162232593,0.0,0.1238698904746196,0.0,0.0,0.1072381025127589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030396667222679,0.0,0.0929865684914015,0.0,0.17491474226827336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819229938593911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268487786298981,0.0,0.09250158968287706,0.07283389559284358,0.08320704636200857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931706991458406,0.07744284810569148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469332753823087,0.0,0.0729920871031345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463103101908207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3673189320394419,0.0,0.08414875821312626,0.0,0.0,0.06072203965046837,0.11713074498475533,0.0,0.0,0.05329602320482516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062054540016875964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541449886422688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217949680364714,0.0,0.08247420345783021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12985574896574853,0.0999314546340555,0.0,0.05885854611088805
mentalhealth,Flufferoo22,2020/02/02,"Packets of Hope, sending out letters in the US My friend is Sending out letters to anyone in the US struggling with their mental health. She's funding it all herself and could also use any donations! 
To apply for a letter DM me, and I can send you the link to apply, or I can give you my friends Instagram

I hope this can help someone 💜
Please don't send me hate",4.173513513513512,4.924885000000003,5.011729729729733,85.49137837837841,70.62162162162163,7.0010810810810815,31.016216216216225,6.742157984588678,1.706992432432432,286,12,57,2,5,93,54,74,0.034,0.718,0.248,0.9484,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,2,2,1,0,1,6,1,1,4,0,6,1,0,1,1,12,11,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,2,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,14,4,10,10,1,8,0,0,0,0,18,4,0,3,0,41,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16821423554674958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430430163357919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470793520174836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679447793471735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250267846053203,0.0,0.0,0.20178378827828186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20767388662269928,0.0,0.22358877968527946,0.0,0.0,0.14099100565428074,0.0,0.0,0.4178436079337641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119800695347901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308975869256566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822613516851712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21990011462722694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5060425287089252,0.18167207215561554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deadlythrowaway1337,2020/02/02,"I have stopped socializing. I have been going out with friends almost everyday for over a year now, it brought me joy, but as of the past week I have completely blocked myself into my room and only leave to get food / water.

I sit with my ringer on my phone off, programming and reading articles while staying up late at night, I have no intentions to be outside and have told my friends I am busy when I truly am not.  Something doesn't seem right with this, and I am aware of it.

Any explanations for a change so dramatic and quick in my personality?  People are starting to take notice and I am not sure how to explain it to anyone.

Thank you.",5.359761904761903,5.933373507936512,5.91123015873016,80.73446428571428,67.8888888888889,9.157142857142855,31.62301587301588,9.188382445141503,2.57808253968254,506,20,101,9,8,164,89,126,0.085,0.795,0.12,0.7662,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,0,13,2,0,2,1,22,22,12,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,4,11,2,2,2,1,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,0,17,5,21,18,0,26,0,0,0,0,8,10,0,2,12,74,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937168533849836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155577266872964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352679654968562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20464933247930991,0.0,0.20283348416662086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339260894700541,0.0,0.2989251127535583,0.0,0.10107205227467288,0.0,0.10994471639211484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822523305050856,0.2048405056204678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18154405206815813,0.0,0.0,0.2202493624362966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471309528079007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18467432074406454,0.13411707247287286,0.16891710873111634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19350696748896928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16520918497972872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17611381668857454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19720261861871485,0.0,0.14893081467452546,0.0,0.0,0.13692817285537012,0.20619688061766772,0.0,0.1617367212354716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18232868606559247,0.0,0.14545379544969167,0.0,0.0,0.1781070188940662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18485417582935787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551776238904599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245784299953455
mentalhealth,xxmattyaxx,2020/02/02,"Any advice or does anyone have a similar or same thing as me  I've had this situation for years now before I started college. It's hard to explain and I feel embarrassed about it's the first time it's ever left my mind  but basically, I have always had strange coping choices that have helped me alot but I'm not sure where I developed them and I feel very embarrassed that I have them I was wondering of anyone had this to a similar or same extent. Basically I have had this method that to cope with being put down in life I have had to develop scenarios and people in my mind that are usually being projected as people that I know, where I'm falling apart and that person that I'm projecting it on is kind to me and practically takes care of me. It's not even like partners or just being kind but more like I'm a child they have that is seriously struggling with life and has been through alot that has effected them.

I have used this every night for years and in the day where, they are practically taking care of me when I'm in fear feel down or feel like I'm falling apart when I'm in bed it's automatic that it's like I'm a child and I sleep next to them to feel comfort from it.

These are always females that I tend to have an attraction to not just as liking them but more feel safe around them.

I'm not sure if what I have written is understandable it's hard for me to explain does anyone else have anything like this that they do on a daily basis.",6.159040697674418,5.325409893687709,6.839898255813953,79.53101017441864,66.34219269102991,10.315697674418603,30.772632890365447,9.673873057562805,2.499187541528239,1162,36,246,21,16,385,127,301,0.14300000000000002,0.764,0.09300000000000001,-0.7671,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,9,2,12,20,0,4,10,0,30,3,1,2,3,50,58,23,0,1,16,0,8,6,1,0,2,0,1,4,29,11,0,1,12,0,0,3,4,5,0,1,8,8,31,15,34,47,7,32,0,0,0,0,16,16,0,9,19,171,60,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877843190587222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18525059641648894,0.0,0.0,0.07569989765151162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335079092901146,0.11405820547276227,0.09160503595200847,0.09909641185203773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472321932783123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22699176132306226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179074952830071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19482985313904455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299170892287907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352433411652583,0.10069329177443964,0.09379001835947183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526343414127286,0.33771364115585806,0.07952543377128134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468683429583027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19943770533932872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746139516015098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318406450373852,0.06117733259675408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209470777077368,0.0,0.15725405937490736,0.3263054234827303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22479841964651848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838770626700905,0.1044641818600097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15434744448777946,0.09719837893190524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190510029764253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512583222656212,0.11139815765687068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787912872273665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163734979676287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098313528035809,0.0,0.16739421167464744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395457691218994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649102841390589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158857195071357,0.0,0.09614280809091832,0.12260079162039983,0.09184881451039514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071936796780565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433699823113163
mentalhealth,TA100293988019,2020/02/02,"I think I’m a psychopath I don’t really know what to do. The thought scares me, because people say psychopaths are close to evil and irredeemable. I hear about a death, no matter how close I am to them, and I don’t care. I literally do not care, and my apathy breaks my heart. Why?? What is wrong with me? I am in love with someone, I KNOW I am. But at the same time are emotions real??? Why does only one person make me feel? What’s happening? What’s wrong with me?",-0.10214776632302147,2.1185732783505142,1.9171391752577345,95.71495274914093,89.41237113402063,5.295189003436427,17.361683848797252,6.816661863887847,-0.08697182130584169,356,9,82,5,12,118,60,97,0.214,0.6729999999999999,0.113,-0.89,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,0,2,7,1,1,4,0,10,2,1,2,0,20,22,5,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,4,8,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,1,3,16,3,9,21,1,6,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,52,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141871193163819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.381965718354439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16392296437849646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21070717811378986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947134474472552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564440609992753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21112063957930405,0.22197235310424945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20588979667037335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16906151987880302,0.0,0.12503600617363622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693130801913105,0.1424635367577297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986249405333974,0.1635585732945283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132085292878978,0.1200005025701554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14896253778880095,0.187537675855474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871366268457973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200256060064618,0.0,0.14870931460328632,0.1092264457760625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3380501422138027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4096049556628648,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MostCynical,2020/02/02,"I don’t know what to do. My mother is in a lot of pain, everyday, as a result of this and other factors she is very depressed, and has attempted suicide a few times, once again tonight. She’s been admitted to a mental hospital once and it did no good whatsoever. we really have no idea what to do, we can’t get her out of pain and we know it’s just a matter of time before someone isn’t there to call the paramedics. I really just don’t know what to do anymore or how to handle it. I try and support her as much as I can but it doesn’t seem to change much. I appreciate any advice.",0.8096933333333318,2.6203583360000025,3.2933000000000017,90.00448333333334,81.64,6.7266666666666675,21.61666666666667,7.793537801064563,0.8632266666666664,452,14,103,8,12,157,74,125,0.105,0.8140000000000001,0.081,-0.4491,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,3,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,6,0,15,2,0,2,0,23,22,11,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,9,9,0,0,6,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,2,0,13,2,16,20,4,7,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,3,5,77,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17237415149039315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199567358801438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17493948489128874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010176440309475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801221509543929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18660576747236526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193139836705136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216071050038324,0.0,0.0,0.14795433114305825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991319486751825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908312965736486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499673302249253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777677643020779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593457547011752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3757163729891396,0.0,0.0,0.3753999648486633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22601023988797256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058617698634053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149461511446044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19295085694115285,0.20017443831055404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057182652008167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197627097902366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554688084056844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,omglol9312,2020/02/02,"Sometimes I feel like a different person. I have had depersonalization before for a year on and off. Idk if that’s what this is. 

When I look at my boyfriend or daughter or kind of anyone I know it kind of feels like I don’t know them. It even feels that way when I look at myself. I just don’t feel like that’s me. Idk. It’s very strange. I’ve kind of always had these thoughts since I was younger but on a 1-10 scale, when I was younger it was like a 2 and in the past year it’s like an 8-9. 

Idk how to explain the way I feel. I just look at my boyfriend and think, wow he’s really by boyfriend huh? Or I look at my daughter and I’m like oh fuck I really had a child what the hell and she looks just like me. 

Everything’s weird. Unfamiliar kind of. 

Am I alone in this? Sometimes I feel like I have a mental illness not discovered yet.",-1.4402914389799657,0.5579246065573821,0.7877595628415293,101.48670309653922,98.01639344262293,4.2411657559198535,16.61384335154827,6.037888025583468,-0.6563457194899818,645,18,164,7,27,213,90,183,0.136,0.715,0.149,0.5046,1,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,9,16,2,0,10,1,12,2,0,1,0,26,30,14,0,1,9,2,6,8,0,0,1,0,0,2,13,5,0,0,11,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,7,11,24,13,16,23,0,18,1,0,5,1,8,9,2,4,15,95,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927550108038178,0.0,0.0,0.08779193768325033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737743439337509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978038537257438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11023444545703656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968769746304547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482468327630628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200911145514634,0.3015025942560625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975413676101989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4394855370032161,0.1159699709443668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4123709318908675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4430049219504033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632825303106473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072027626246134,0.0,0.09212638653986263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13518353042672027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727813264784205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20870219185279892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676059050339153,0.0,0.0837623581770306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870559723505354,0.0,0.16749626161477998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588866968531335
mentalhealth,bellabear1901,2020/02/02,i’m having a panic attack guys i don’t know what to do. i’m having the worst panic attack that i’ve ever felt and i can barely breathe and my dads screaming and i don’t know what to go and i just want to die. i have one of my best friends trying to calm me down and my boyfriend too. the person that i was upset about with (my sister) tried calming me down and was calm and patient with me. my dad was screaming at me “IM DONE WITH THIS BULLSHIT YEA FUCKING CRY IT ALL OUT” and my mom is ignoring me.,-0.7712712975098306,1.329106715596332,1.4115661861074713,98.80956422018349,91.93577981651377,3.4812581913499345,16.96002621231979,4.65589566412798,-0.9057973787680208,388,10,90,1,14,129,64,109,0.3,0.583,0.11699999999999999,-0.9794,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,15,3,3,3,1,12,2,1,0,2,20,20,8,1,1,1,4,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,6,12,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,10,0,1,5,3,17,5,13,15,3,6,0,0,0,1,7,4,1,0,1,66,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43975185872697975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028280803408852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21230130550854748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20058685106719096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977853730175448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17482648569042733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855723808707084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493222336200835,0.17867776606874616,0.0,0.0,0.1098414949160324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913706476927601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087679963823904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124355629521669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263589914692147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13096678082823665,0.0,0.0,0.4535284245238645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687585210893363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624393485986795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11399741778101992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jamiewoodson,2020/02/02,"is there something wrong with me? Hey guys, so I'm going to make this short. 

A year or so ago, my family issues were horrible. I dont want to talk about it but my family became very abusive and toxic towards me, I remember having a mental breakdown every day in the toilet and thinking about dying. I was then diagnosed with anxiety (which hasn't gone away). One day, I was crying so much that there were no tears left, dry and painful crying. Then all of a sudden I couldn't feel it anymore, I couldn't feel the sadness or really any emotion. I seriously felt almost blunt. Numb. It's been getting a little better, I can get sad but I never cry, I can however get very angry, I can get happy but not easily, and I cant feel excitement full stop. All I think is 'I'll get through today'. I have a few friends, but none that really care about me. I like to socialize sometimes but the thought of it gives me a lot of anxiety. 

What's wrong with me and how can I start to feel again? I'm sick of this absolutely dull feeling. The only time that I cry is when I create scenarios in my head where all my family is dead except from me and I'm alone, they feel so real and I cant stop them.",1.8054879406307969,3.5978201183673484,3.9246103896103897,86.76016233766234,78.42857142857143,7.230055658627088,21.74860853432282,8.150884317080207,1.1167551020408162,919,26,194,17,22,315,138,245,0.29100000000000004,0.603,0.106,-0.9947,1,1,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,2,1,13,14,0,0,10,0,21,5,1,2,4,44,46,22,2,3,9,0,7,1,1,0,4,0,0,1,11,10,0,2,11,0,0,2,10,8,0,1,8,7,31,6,21,36,8,26,0,3,0,0,8,9,0,4,16,132,42,0,0.0,0.11926707657966328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923009133904418,0.0,0.10079766384555476,0.10425465832581947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684530763260516,0.0,0.154011104094774,0.0,0.09982887433406533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945745227165184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890266623173773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263081487087183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4422864610181364,0.1298363091476938,0.0,0.0,0.10216901179456764,0.10447044622825936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179741913747367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132303154436156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481141302117072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846832976044433,0.0,0.30538400145286226,0.0,0.09665054979455937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777060308337476,0.0,0.2629566444876125,0.0965634073875222,0.05720808680731083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967042631701073,0.0,0.10715573250327193,0.0,0.0,0.10330744479455367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506415325514888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10936870192155773,0.0,0.0,0.049177983837564436,0.10088897958320828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557856319596857,0.0,0.0,0.06719214099675766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144282643902752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07399757342153397,0.0,0.07763613265370597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821064272862724,0.07655738808091013,0.10711062725255538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457449737901484,0.12897230062160706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140295310418438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261142958732992,0.0,0.07749391925117399,0.09955651307175484,0.0,0.07124852431415504,0.0,0.0,0.16831456193618932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090766963562289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899928090806084,0.0,0.07991375876544941,0.0586963625099164,0.0,0.09541505945171276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611208482953307,0.05937259117978355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201144676330276,0.0,0.06482252054818485
mentalhealth,Unnuetzes_Halbwissen,2020/02/02,"Getting foggy: Anybody dealing with pseudo-dementia out there? I had tests done and there is no physical explanation for my symptoms. I feel like it's so incredibly hard to concentrate, I experience lower capacity when it comes to memorizing or recalling. My therapist (and the neurologist) suspect pseudo -dementia due to my years of depression and other mental health problems. Anybody else experience this? Is in treatment? Can tell me how they deal with it?
Thank you friends",5.167613636363637,8.795218625000004,6.273863636363636,63.035681818181835,81.5,9.90909090909091,36.02272727272727,9.573946990214177,5.330625,390,23,52,14,11,129,64,80,0.177,0.733,0.09,-0.7802,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,1,0,13,9,7,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,2,9,3,9,7,0,6,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,1,4,39,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18577395335489771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4446766704204697,0.18574960092980386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22069738305608447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18015815708462374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4219181734231163,0.0,0.0,0.10904532586418607,0.15406917192447026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16662013822993066,0.0,0.11267463724315885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19319103747688854,0.0,0.0,0.229238912867201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536169375078364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21733684828938796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063596707767935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241556787141928,0.0,0.0,0.18849833352726605,0.1985528471294148,0.0,0.2504005227495918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887943394976685
mentalhealth,needtosayitneedto,2020/02/02,"never said this before Dread, sadness and isolation. I feel these so much, I feel these everyday. Where does it come from? I feel I know the source but am torn between thinking it's imposed on me or in fact, self imposed. Have I painted myself into this corner? Is my life the result of someone who has no spine in making their own decisions? Have I towed the line for so long I've lost who I truly am? I have an urge, a desire to create but am terrified of the ridicule and inevitable disappointment it would cause dad. Mum I miss you. You always were there when I felt like this, you could always talk me down. Now I'm high, so high there's no coming down. Where do I go? How do I regain control? Am I insane? the end of it all seems so peaceful, no longer creating a life to make someone else happy. What is my own happiness? Any thought I shoot down internally, the voice in my head is the worst critic of them all, constantly in the spotlight, constantly in fear, never a chance for peace. Mum you showed me life is a gift but I feel I can't control it, I'm so inept at anything, how can anyone do anything in life and be happy? Get a job, grind it out, show up everyday, even if you hate it, you know there's kids in Africa who slave in the mines for cents a day, yet I'm too much of a fuck wit to even use the head start I have to do anything. So what's the point? If I could trade places with them I would, they deserve to have this, not me. Trade and then end it all, give someone the opportunity to use a gift I was given, give it to someone who knows how to use it. I've had enough of this feeling, carrying a wight that gets heavier every day, what a fucking waste. I hate my job, I hate it so much I've thought about killing myself to escape, what kind of coward kills himself to escape a job, the type who fears the faces of those who trust him to be something he's not. I'm supposed to be someone who has it figured out, who has a job that he worked for, who made decisions, who is purposeful, I can't tell you how far from the truth I am from all of that. I'm lost. I love those who love me, I will never kill myself because it would hurt them too much, I'm not worried what it would do to me, I only care what it would do to them and I could never be the reason for such pain. So I lie in limbo, waiting for an end, towing the line, living in dread, as I have many days before, as I will for the rest to come.",2.6949507154213035,3.566005031372555,3.899401165871754,91.65622416534184,74.17647058823529,6.689984101748808,23.39162692103869,6.766488616294105,0.4942564917859032,1866,49,429,15,37,610,219,510,0.20600000000000002,0.654,0.141,-0.9901,6,1,1,1,0,2,67.0,0,7,6,6,26,32,9,4,32,0,45,13,4,15,10,72,93,27,3,11,9,3,6,1,0,7,5,2,0,2,44,12,0,3,17,2,3,4,12,21,0,0,11,8,60,11,58,68,13,51,0,6,0,4,40,27,2,4,21,299,104,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097446439473474,0.0,0.0,0.04534806234969292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046627677439240255,0.0,0.16462813071509838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040650535200921496,0.0,0.1134879858310179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798976527506104,0.06850382740511599,0.0,0.17232957578567806,0.0,0.14412551196625153,0.14958571527298994,0.1597275530165549,0.0,0.0,0.12901885550999387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835646151335636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055706730723103,0.0,0.17718925528379648,0.06890339398580309,0.0,0.0880895798059058,0.0,0.056184958398807563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15007824839408251,0.1685896076766564,0.0,0.06402802318685194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232983496266646,0.06968028290031474,0.1279405880329041,0.037898601884416065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21296215303194727,0.0,0.19751278881441145,0.13687602366960264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409126517749394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138763333827132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646981490569731,0.0,0.2213310979115158,0.06944212840780786,0.10994493700996856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840624916309145,0.032578905098080015,0.0,0.0588840450733096,0.05901409482299516,0.0,0.0,0.14558903153794256,0.0,0.12037156740792945,0.06309892545765351,0.08902546278028109,0.06760808703333256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960844860945204,0.0,0.20572622141333416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05071692017881586,0.07095750349959133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967159436998728,0.0,0.06303884561094697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856324951558174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343267161375046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060707486853856726,0.06956696106308036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825097686346957,0.05133734333845981,0.0,0.0,0.047199960853947474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05359884820557359,0.058285597929516576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04272903240915393,0.0,0.105880825511263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727831948671517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04854744811832472,0.0677218180637488,0.0,0.2368554262501525,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ariadnefrommaze,2020/02/02,"Is therapists omitting some diagnoses a myth or true? This is a question simply out of curiosity. I've heard several times that high-functioning mental disorders\*, such as BPD and autism spectrum ones, are often omitted when consulting a psychologist as the diagnosis often carries a stigma and the disorder\* doesn't affect as much the other's life.

I'm asking if this is true because, despite having a SAD diagnosis, some of my behaviours are quite unusual in a mental health way. Such as getting easily upset, having an extreme reaction from that and quickly jumping to regret such reaction, which often includes crying in a way that surely doesn't match my age. Still, my therapist only focused on how there isn't much I can do to avoid such, and all I can do is to avoid situations that make me like that. That often made me wonder if she was overlooking important information about my mental health. But I remembered about hearing some choose to omit some diagnoses, and thought if that was true I don't need to worry much. 

\*I'm not sure if those words are the correct ones. If they aren't, I'll gladly change them.",7.1850672143390595,8.163421800970877,7.545339805825241,69.18998879761016,64.0,10.804480955937269,34.29275578790142,10.727762888450028,4.009865272591487,905,38,146,23,13,296,123,206,0.08,0.7959999999999999,0.124,0.8483,0,2,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,2,1,15,12,0,3,12,0,20,5,0,4,7,44,31,18,0,7,8,0,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,12,6,0,2,6,0,0,1,6,5,0,2,5,2,13,7,18,26,8,12,0,2,0,0,9,4,0,16,6,111,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849033254396887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726314084347467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15963205843026246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408038512903847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922444956296612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572888963726627,0.0,0.0,0.2905236267802925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621951574721377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26944998753755395,0.14285187163347626,0.0,0.0,0.13391403098264548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952439674489655,0.06192165787431232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993006096008492,0.08460389064314762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3831902511482749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795185203243864,0.09398049907019174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17177264104116174,0.09639598907013368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198444569738947,0.13480989510373284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435784279417304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431868210079795,0.0,0.0,0.14246773268447094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121946123284033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23891307292896025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29432358097667466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062210858560396,0.07390656944804225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20121003504061805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374505514923132,0.0,0.12871664152448795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Packanack,2020/02/02,"Very concerned about a friend Alright guys I really do need some advice. A couple weeks ago I’d say my friend found some weird videos on Instagram of people pooping and stuff, kinda memey. I thought it was a bit weird but I could see how you could find it funny. However, this obsession to find strange videos turned dark. He sent me a video of someone getting hit with an axe in a corner store. It wasn’t too graphic so I didn’t think much of it, until a couple days ago. I sent him a funny video of a car crashing with a wii bowling sound effect on it, he replied with a video of a literal dead body being scavenged for meat. In the video three people are literally destroying this dead body and tearing it apart, I don’t want to get too specific. They took the guys eye out. After watching this I was immediately disgusted and felt like crying (kinda). This wasn’t even the worst part. The worst part is that he isn’t phased by any of this he sent that video with two laughing emojis; 😂 😂. I’m really concerned about his mental health, we are only 13. What should I do?",2.755457452041316,4.7345047523364485,3.6904820462370895,88.66457697983276,76.24299065420561,6.5613379242498775,22.94540088539105,7.475848149327749,0.8897887850467292,843,25,172,11,19,270,128,214,0.19699999999999998,0.7070000000000001,0.096,-0.9814,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,1,1,1,7,12,2,1,16,1,16,5,4,2,0,27,32,7,2,5,1,0,1,1,2,1,1,2,0,2,15,9,0,0,7,7,1,5,5,7,0,2,12,6,15,5,23,15,8,18,0,0,3,0,17,7,0,4,7,103,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320666326831506,0.2396039458962381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190636785374168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475483683920026,0.3002414941712352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21581192937882207,0.2990809411231545,0.14845549814827094,0.08716031645139329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892650413957316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976481787867536,0.0,0.24704858636934535,0.0,0.0,0.14818456928249726,0.20883250363045452,0.0,0.14122018407325573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676387200364356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14365771332369978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602727175258366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619901724241912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935051232424333,0.10021172178797867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278736688723523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927077102585223,0.0,0.18739144239907127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17316059905640294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747639271506694,0.0,0.0,0.10769673962251393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451182420186302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15471396679219307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659841164430138,0.0,0.10729369231982046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501561871827616,0.0,0.147003964215068,0.13202152891825536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151258053456424,0.07971474034867164,0.0,0.10840886336366874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rosie_Posie_22,2020/02/02,"Had a really strong disassociation episode today Kind of still in it honestly. It’s taking so much mental energy to make my body follow commands. I feel extremely disconnected from the physical plane. Typing this out is making it worse. 

I’m in the bathroom at work. It feels better when I’m working and can’t think about my physical being. 

I made my fiancé really worry before I went to work. That feels bad. 

I hope I feel more connected to myself tomorrow.",3.447428940568475,6.194775034883728,5.562248062015506,72.20355297157623,77.72093023255813,8.938501291989663,23.50904392764857,9.444778638647367,2.7260609819121453,367,12,60,11,9,127,65,86,0.106,0.735,0.159,0.6077,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,5,4,6,0,0,3,0,4,1,1,3,0,11,18,3,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,3,4,9,5,10,14,2,10,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,4,38,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647488659117824,0.0,0.0,0.16789959728677034,0.0,0.0,0.17450811129709032,0.0,0.21917126328687772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.399071348789891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19597722534622508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20547206488918895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18670318441183212,0.2634171227839737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19884600394659324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14504842080145147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528086755727341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15757513658657196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14835549787976782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643078086930848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18703050727498624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18291196345664407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4309406107799272,0.20038184477715246,0.2010797225857585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nick_Scopes,2020/02/02,"I literally talk to myself out loud and beg the universe to kill me everyday I have no idea why I’m posting right now. Im not looking for advice. I just want to write this somewhere because I’ve felt like this for years now. I’m too much of a coward to take my own life. Every moment I get I look up at the sky and beg for this to be my last day alive. I just don’t want to wake up anymore. I hate myself more than anyone ever could. Im just a complete doormat. 

I see so many tragedies on the news and I’m actually jealous that i wasn’t a victim. I’m just sick of living. I know the people in my life would be sad for a while, but they just have no idea how much better life would be without me. I sound like I’m feeling sorry for myself, but I don’t. I just know that I’m a lost cause. I have no motivation to do anything besides play call of duty to pass the time. Anxiety has completely destroyed my social life. I lost all my friends. The family that I don’t live with have given up on trying to contact me because I don’t answer the phone. 

Hopefully tomorrow I’ll finally drop dead from a heart attack or get shot in the head with a stray bullet. Maybe I’ll wake up with enough balls to slit my wrists or something. Hopefully the 6 Benadryl pills I take every night to go to sleep kill me in my sleep and I don’t wake up at all. I just give up.",1.6222374429223727,2.9509375479452093,3.581712328767125,91.05364155251145,77.63013698630138,6.37351598173516,22.44063926940639,6.996647511020387,0.5218694063926939,1052,30,241,11,24,357,148,292,0.18899999999999997,0.705,0.105,-0.9764,0,0,1,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,1,4,13,17,7,0,16,0,18,14,8,3,3,44,45,11,3,7,13,0,2,2,1,2,6,2,0,0,6,8,0,1,8,2,0,2,11,10,0,0,5,7,35,7,40,34,7,33,0,3,3,0,9,16,0,4,15,148,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.10052329548502834,0.0,0.0,0.10066057520246798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880267758667064,0.0,0.10215864166711797,0.07202727002539118,0.0,0.08476878595152973,0.0,0.0,0.11718920632641625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12558837310345555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911043318395604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10518514037637168,0.0,0.0,0.10582006107232513,0.0,0.0,0.21600889878985646,0.0,0.0,0.08224542606059114,0.0,0.0,0.0664331891453286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643728439505602,0.0,0.0,0.09317880844077384,0.17358141739869684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710904178973156,0.0,0.05208515569502554,0.0,0.09890614262914776,0.11284286315849225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795855830853442,0.0,0.10763736963837917,0.0988169665266032,0.0585431868244071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170144825779164,0.10571839364826983,0.0,0.0,0.12206782545703936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046251493782168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325724167054055,0.22253782733955704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279315009139887,0.0,0.11322364885477858,0.08396722838538342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910371806664499,0.10065136088705158,0.0,0.18192014904492232,0.0,0.17300559210422906,0.0,0.2248960502264606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443638216798423,0.10348779698579708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15144899985769272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666828662489793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141444434782368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865549292542368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08797032271093247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208595568451843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20616959501565452,0.10500613510960599,0.0,0.07930244211378225,0.0,0.11531171439226287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15490200895076586,0.08279586127324177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0600661953248894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993730296020245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151641111141025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295086793106536,0.0,0.0,0.09929835412417036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635127186619595,0.0,0.0,0.06633532325007567
mentalhealth,rubix44,2020/02/02,"My mood just drops through the floor sometimes for seemingly no reason Mostly venting here. I had a great day yesterday, a perfect damn day. Today started out great, got up and got a text from a friend to meet for lunch. Lunch was great and I came back home. Then my mood and thoughts just started turning dark. Nothing even bad happened. The rest of the day has been just me being depressed, and I don't know why. I hate that. It just feels out of my control and my mood can be stable or just drop super low at any given time. Even when my mood is good, it's not like I'm super happy or bubbly, me being a great mood is just me not being sad.

I've been reading about depression and medications and other ""fixes"" for a decade, and I still don't know how to get better. Nothing seems to help much or at all. I think diet can play a big part in mood and mood swings, and I need to pay closer attention to what I eat and how it affects me, but there are so many other factors as well. I just want to have a stable ""I'm okay"" mood for a month or two. I wish I would get better and feel good much more often.",3.2254565217391296,3.9475282739130466,4.17625,90.72437500000002,72.78260869565217,6.619565217391305,23.505434782608692,6.322622252153567,0.4320652173913047,853,21,190,5,16,276,132,230,0.064,0.7090000000000001,0.228,0.9890000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,6,20,32,2,0,12,1,18,5,0,5,2,51,42,23,0,4,14,0,2,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,7,15,4,1,10,2,1,1,5,7,1,1,9,2,20,17,22,28,7,26,0,4,0,0,3,10,1,8,14,127,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713413886534587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872182363829988,0.09470667121660796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20063363993163355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297300844981528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721784279518422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21945277927014345,0.0,0.19538873734209636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606397149258307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498347124281202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147040339629722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763329305028962,0.0,0.118521681829827,0.0,0.0,0.1902740990805349,0.18143560688902494,0.50021395376255,0.0,0.0,0.10030297753464927,0.12074497735874043,0.0,0.11198551890053514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602761803744824,0.0,0.11377636596672333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467284670985945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05541462324317468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149970098708038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142656053666014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09053621929479642,0.0,0.1667635527966184,0.08410456255468984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176722188567924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228302113188074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345753210914762,0.0,0.0,0.11662167985067287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20651906513854615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218204230368294,0.0,0.16056819834428612,0.0,0.09058281870424263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267933730032597,0.0,0.09004823883305918,0.06614010092352147,0.0,0.10751537900996704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337582753314905,0.1108015383765533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06690208736629015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198434865484188,0.0,0.10235007815356248,0.0,0.13043526499043254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057517076918133,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,apinktriangle,2020/02/02,"Advice for dealing with self harm urges ? I have heard of the rubber band thing where you smack yourself with a rubber band and it’s supposed to help with self harm urges, but I get very itchy and scratch through skin when feeling overwhelmed and those are the urges that I can’t seem to get a grip on. When I tried the rubber band thing it just made me feel more itchy. I ended up scratching myself really bad a couple times and cutting my nails didn’t seem to help? I was wondering if any of you guys have some advice for dealing with this kind of thing?",8.425135135135136,6.279896378378378,6.99412612612613,84.45875675675678,62.6936936936937,9.60072072072072,32.10990990990991,6.742157984588678,1.7310742342342331,442,11,93,2,5,131,70,111,0.157,0.77,0.073,-0.8936,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,4,6,1,1,6,0,6,1,1,1,0,18,15,8,0,1,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,8,8,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,7,11,1,15,11,2,7,0,1,0,0,13,3,0,5,4,58,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3411451420956729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870299970539808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457456598452406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314115928576892,0.0,0.0,0.35991591012886154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546034165367496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17651993151156847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823949728393219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17283633140739302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23400031307164504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177158010346725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516762441254562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118240390670707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31781559875965065,0.36419668363767205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3478986257749013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178409321643456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851100149267492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14402568748454425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18929683585948853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jane_avril,2020/02/02,"Therapist telling me that I am being too harsh on myself made me emotionally/mentally break down I met my therapist a couple of days back. He normally does not say a lot and just listens. I am quite new to therapy. So, although I'd rather have more feedback from him than me just sobbing through my tales to him, I want to stick with it and see where things go. Yesterday I was telling him about something that I am dealing with over the past couple of years which has caused me a significant amount of trauma and makes me feel stuck, like I just cannot move on from this. I was talking about how I feel that I should have been able to handle it much better alongside a lot of other stuff. He kept saying things likes ""that's harsh"", as in am I being too harsh on myself and ""You are kicking yourself when you are down"". Hearing him say these things had me feeling incredibly upset and caused me to feel more vulnerable and broken than I have felt in a long while. Even now, two days after my session, I am just randomly bursting into tears and I feel emotionally/mentally exhausted. I spent all of yesterday feeling physically exhausted and spent a good part of it in bed. I do not understand this reaction of mine. Shouldn't someone telling me that I am being too hard on myself,  make me ease up and feel better? I cannot comprehend this strong emotionally draining reaction that I am having to being told that I should probably be more forgiving of myself. How do I make sense of this?",6.936729094076657,6.765702627177702,7.02931837979094,76.61450021777006,64.54006968641116,10.519947735191641,33.6169425087108,10.125756701596842,3.2123033101045286,1182,45,225,24,16,380,147,287,0.105,0.792,0.10300000000000001,-0.1635,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,0,4,18,12,0,1,7,0,30,2,0,8,1,47,54,16,0,6,7,0,9,2,0,3,2,5,1,0,21,12,0,1,10,0,2,2,5,5,0,1,12,15,44,7,38,34,9,29,0,1,1,0,21,13,1,3,15,178,65,2,0.10916654973894474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394233830027936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19309788383706086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22428823578399373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415814218103629,0.0,0.1408067869165776,0.11254591929373876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553238333694727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279767504042025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210347652832172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3863852134507495,0.0,0.10481700735047676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062041865960768265,0.09156372254915557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977917860704872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12303863553895883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666652397405783,0.0,0.0,0.09660896124798424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856189935105785,0.0,0.10329602889973644,0.2186085589286904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160267659588211,0.08024997492232559,0.0,0.0,0.10543373399770137,0.0,0.0,0.10696004049099396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182167351646652,0.10421182417840047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770000443489033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161120632235837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604408659306376,0.0,0.0,0.0869916063010981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249646333496404,0.08404174338411055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496958158289567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877439375247549,0.2862491285468709,0.0,0.1248414635856314,0.2535015565160018,0.21757621464883867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431331650527444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663985657486913,0.11364622824339644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438925944380444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07029967886595506
mentalhealth,falcon-master-69,2020/02/02,"I Need Advice... Hi All,
Like a lot of people in this world I have depression and anxiety and, fortunately, I was recently diagnosed. That being said I think the most limiting part of my depression in my incessant need to not be outwardly expressive about who I actually am inside. What I mean by that is that is I feel like I have created this version of myself that everyone sees as kinda like a “straightforward dude” if that makes any sense. And obviously I have people that I feel I can be honest with like my sister and my friends but I find it the most challenging thing in the world to just be myself around most people. 

So my biggest question is how can I practice just being myself around new people.

Any sort of advice would be super helpful whether it’s personally stories or links to articles or books, etc.

Thanks",5.52744755244755,6.913823423076928,6.430652680652683,74.21737762237763,67.97435897435898,10.288111888111887,30.84848484848485,10.436869588844218,3.4590205128205116,658,26,116,18,11,218,92,156,0.038,0.7879999999999999,0.175,0.9633,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,7,11,0,0,5,0,17,1,0,2,2,36,27,12,0,4,8,1,2,4,1,1,1,1,0,1,13,7,0,1,7,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,4,21,9,16,18,8,11,0,2,1,0,9,9,0,10,6,93,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.14571412951420226,0.0,0.0,0.29182624825926196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030845337462361,0.0,0.11422888110189593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658517279579731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572170455656225,0.15155597992983788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653052716831954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268102169823396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100068269931932,0.10667376138840362,0.0,0.0,0.13647516528813264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536374633567738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008560144766762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291799534929909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694595727549352,0.0,0.0,0.09967181431511987,0.0,0.0,0.16265252818757486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214367869221658,0.0,0.14421354235718514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16169828666382305,0.0,0.4140768980035448,0.13037988213106774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727182638534646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474348273988159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420368795431439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898817602624695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747318021579746,0.0,0.0,0.0992011299655459,0.09567779938782328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607217003970618,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,grae23,2020/02/02,"I'm so close to taking 100 steps back (venting/tw) So much has been going on. Relationships I've had for 10 years that i thought were strong have started to crumble, my dating life has completely gone to shit, my social life is almost non-existent and I'm very isolated, therapy has been reminding me of trauma I had buried with the intention of forgetting forever, and I just can't fucking do this anymore. My dad stopped talking to me, my family is falling apart yet again, my friendships are the least comfortable they've ever been, my heart feels like it's been hit by a train, everything hurts. Everywhere I go people flee or they just fuckin' die. I'm 22 and I can name at least 7 people in my life who have died. Nothing ever fucking lasts, all senses of stability I've managed to build over the past year have been demolished. All I can think about, the only thing that makes me feel relaxed, is reopening my forearm. The memory of my ""attempt"" is the most calming thing I have right now. I keep closing my eyes and trying to relive the sensations because if I stop imagining it I'm scared I'll just actually do it again. I've always been on my own and I'm so, so tired.",4.314736308316434,5.65194329310345,5.347008113590267,81.03409736308319,70.8103448275862,8.907099391480731,29.595334685598374,9.325443323948027,2.606314097363084,932,37,180,20,17,307,143,232,0.147,0.792,0.061,-0.9621,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,1,2,15,12,4,1,8,0,26,11,4,2,4,31,45,11,2,1,5,1,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,9,8,0,3,5,1,0,6,1,7,0,0,11,3,24,5,19,33,7,30,0,1,1,3,7,9,4,4,16,114,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.13405936896097712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756243524440662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430801575530546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362402910661058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563382951136358,0.0,0.08374326550800633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14403634760480305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851496442665417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485293025827304,0.0,0.0,0.123464883860376,0.0,0.12950606921432942,0.0,0.1389230838686406,0.0981415953559219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540041940026095,0.0,0.0,0.1561481374994019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16279147606782005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706407930637874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221062918368886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197995048245582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910986497911109,0.06711507944738719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169969017299942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098732464315843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318161832297763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448080182193177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114114154111808,0.19047874023178935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474906431627694,0.0,0.11731853689255115,0.0,0.0,0.13753755656454553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14101471042015815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003775087060774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723559196017736,0.0,0.0,0.2297053338707791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328981690527717,0.11041779779816843,0.0,0.0,0.15710167416565524,0.0,0.18253330583292224,0.08802513148360397,0.0,0.10906136953881468,0.0,0.15789375014147294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326943228869587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334976447315627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17693155664702734
mentalhealth,Daffilia,2020/02/02,"I feel the urge to rip my body into shreds like I've gone through a paper cutter. I fucking hate everything about myself. Maybe that's a lie. It is so fucking confusing to tell what I believe anymore. I want to stop eating but I'm such a fucking fatass who can't. I react so weirdly to things. My head hurts. The word my and I are so confusing. I know this isn't me but I keep merging! I am not this girl. I am not. I do not belong in this girls body. I wish suicide was the way out of this body but her cowardice is funny. 

​

I'm angry at her dad, who assigned her, well me, my consiousness, to find a psychatrist since you are so fuckign useless to do it yourself?? like shut the fuck up i don't know how i'm a literal fucking kid or she is i don't fucking know i want to kill myselfns so fuckfibn bad",-0.7010356454720608,1.4727888265895963,1.7495736994219655,95.35784802504816,94.2601156069364,4.270616570327554,21.659200385356456,5.985473137389443,0.2482680154142587,629,25,139,6,24,213,99,173,0.255,0.652,0.092,-0.9893,0,0,0,0,0,2,23.0,0,1,0,0,9,17,8,2,9,0,14,11,4,2,0,25,33,11,2,3,7,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,11,3,1,2,5,0,0,1,7,14,1,0,2,1,27,3,15,31,0,9,0,2,0,6,12,6,6,3,3,92,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977842225509306,0.1455422693152183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878668389780575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000886342219238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494775893504218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3991360210248184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256186099806105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076479213075494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06056289340135604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947408633556968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6643919137048417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118255074548782,0.12292584556283186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282238474726416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064633771468079,0.13251559881564653,0.0,0.19747906148889816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703406774468185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033218166592888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908084298861404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013900686291337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310166910890497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469045224334964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957457346548147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14129525686257213,0.09507347542136127,0.0,0.0,0.10769398464545286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773773731346284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455422693152183,0.0
mentalhealth,Anonymousspineless,2020/02/02,"I feel like I’m always trying to be a character in a show or somthing I feel like I’m always trying to play a character

I feel constantly confused like every situation I’m trying to play a character in a tv show. I feel like I’ve been doing this all my life, I was the edgy kid who “smoked” got in fights and self harmed in  6-12  i was the super prepared prep kid in college in my outside activities I was either the cool older kid who got the 16-17 year olds cigarettes or the religious moral future lawyer girl, I’ve tried being the smart kid but I’m too stupid for that and it fell apart fast...

 I have no clue who I really am. I keep trying to be authentic me but end up falling into a character whiteout realising I don’t even know how to be authentic...

I’m on the waitlist for therapy but as an adolescent I went to counselling and they basically just said past trauma has caused social anxiety and depression so it lead to nowhere 

How do I figure out who I am, I don’t even know if I really like the movies I watch or the music I listen to... I don’t know what I like or what I’ve made myself like to be a certain person. 

Where do I start",1.547603305785124,3.328063925619837,4.010743801652893,85.89975206611572,79.16528925619834,7.5404958677685965,22.570247933884296,8.438071523408619,1.3761834710743803,898,28,193,19,22,314,126,242,0.11,0.7609999999999999,0.129,-0.1154,0,0,2,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,1,2,8,19,2,1,17,1,19,1,0,5,2,33,39,16,0,1,10,0,4,7,0,0,1,2,0,7,10,6,0,1,8,5,0,4,4,6,0,0,9,8,26,13,22,25,2,25,1,1,1,0,16,12,0,6,16,117,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21356785293764707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981749361034062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183407026757327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386831480199147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053363549357564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11366557469166297,0.0,0.0,0.1695264088719442,0.0,0.10812668480149623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595575170232555,0.2750448820086369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052803811543583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406889711744325,0.0,0.0,0.2115865507137145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064589392986948,0.4388815747445501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143245841430772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466463951898314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250904648140888,0.0,0.11205604461772813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442772028754274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220747453617832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338800470060559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14425246586296306,0.0,0.13082005485807188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908352597446447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676078061004896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4356508217510001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896663394307205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264270099594367
mentalhealth,RanchBoullionCube,2020/02/02,"Losing my mind over the fear of being alone for the rest of my life... I’m 18/M and I’m genuinely terrified that I’m going to end up alone and never find a girl who actually cares about me. 

I’m 5’3-5’4 and being this short as a male is a dating death sentence. I’m leaving for college in August and I’m praying that I’ll be able to meet a girl while I’m there. I’m a pretty sociable person and I’d like to think I have a decent personality. 

This fear is eating away at me. It’s the 1st thing I think about when I wake up and the last thing I think about before I go to sleep. Why am I like this? Why can’t I just be a normal teenage guy and be happy?",1.3367321867321884,2.023417783783785,3.9288943488943495,90.85836609336607,77.24324324324324,6.733169533169535,20.21130221130221,6.980632752743323,0.14284324324324382,504,10,125,5,11,179,85,148,0.141,0.71,0.149,-0.168,0,2,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,2,11,0,10,4,2,0,1,15,24,10,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,6,9,7,1,0,4,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,11,4,18,19,1,16,1,1,0,0,8,7,0,0,9,72,20,1,0.15637304118574513,0.0,0.1525975311149109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239106220533932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691761967975087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306194063037247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594327372057474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16000865970554612,0.0,0.0,0.1385001005129506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3519262912544473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14292212670727042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17774080584801444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154833895708401,0.0,0.1664620100871113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746489939816727,0.0,0.1655764721309876,0.0,0.0,0.1104509034897266,0.1527919384318984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494143441200127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578921946544205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060452945465056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321237922169442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730778159480391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15908760000898542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648597192595834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20777460040450332,0.300592592175487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28220469479895355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GuidedHades71,2020/02/02,"I am never extremely happy or sad I am 16 currently. Ever since I started puberty around 4 years ago I noticed I am never extremely happy or sad and have became more and more monotone. When ever certain events happen my emotions and tone can change but its never by a lot. When ever I get something or spend time with friends and family I am for the most part happy, but i'm never extremely happy. Example, when Christmas came this year I got my favorite pair of shoes I've been wanting for over 2 years. I was happy and smiled, but was only a little more happy than usual. This also happens with me being sad. When my sister left for college last year, I was sad but not crying like the rest of my family, including my very tough emotionally and physically dad. I dont feel extremely about anything. I dont feel mixed emotionally though, I feel more content. I just want to know if there is a name for the way I am, if anyone can relate? Is it just my personality?",4.220503759398498,5.569431215789473,5.8502255639097775,77.29157894736842,71.05263157894737,8.375939849624057,27.25563909774436,8.841846274778883,2.2025112781954883,761,26,139,14,14,260,109,190,0.193,0.7120000000000001,0.094,-0.9663,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,14,14,0,0,6,0,17,1,1,0,8,39,30,21,0,4,12,2,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,10,0,0,4,0,1,1,7,5,0,0,6,3,22,9,14,23,8,28,0,4,0,0,5,4,0,7,23,103,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831591213936516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502182277688094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06559588161685377,0.0,0.07719969458957378,0.08351301487297977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729650866610156,0.0,0.0,0.0992411864625328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030486267318264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21989510387415245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165793088221429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545763327775369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768761527937902,0.0,0.14230325704813787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247930519418802,0.0,0.04901315955650997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503042660542188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16591616878867488,0.5991909074758122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05155689688008512,0.07646970891609914,0.0,0.0,0.10192755631284713,0.0,0.0,0.045832049104421166,0.0940247709549361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975603318018602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894159350505192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068061536335786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134863400297285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158979610789633,0.0,0.0,0.08191345694221329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760266986649199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222144616878125,0.0,0.0,0.06640097072238216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921703054544208,0.0,0.05470282347668171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332121559881688,0.07740513777355762,0.11066608681627194,0.07446399630483345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24164869829961655
mentalhealth,vietboy955,2020/02/02,"Please help ! I'm suicidal and close to doing it and people are driving me more towards committing to do it So I am in such of a rough situation right now. I've gotten falsely accused of a crime which I did not commit. Someone used my number in some kind of spoofing device. They used my number and called an local gas station in my area and made a bomb threat. I got arrested and charged with ""making a bomb threat"". Now I am wanting to commit suicide cause I am worried that I cannot fly on an plane anymore cause I suspect that I'm on a no fly list. I'm supposed to be getting married next year to my fiancee in vietnam. I'm in extreme crisis and I tried reaching out online for help on how to resolve this issue. I asked on an law forum on yahoo answers and people attacked me. Someone said ""your crisis is not our problem, deal with it on your own"". Then some others said "" you can forget about marrying your fiancee, your never getting on an airplane for the rest of your life, you'll just die alone"". I am close to just drinking bleach and kill myself that way. Is there anything that I can do to help myself ?? Please help me, I am close to just killing myself.",3.8495324283559573,5.01629024786325,4.755158371040724,85.4869004524887,71.73504273504274,6.360583207642032,29.149321266968325,6.2272716619740125,1.3618434389140268,914,36,177,5,17,297,128,234,0.24600000000000002,0.657,0.09699999999999999,-0.9924,0,1,1,0,0,4,26.0,1,7,1,1,10,8,5,0,10,0,17,2,0,7,4,39,33,11,5,2,5,0,1,0,2,1,1,2,0,0,10,14,1,0,3,1,0,1,5,6,0,0,6,3,31,2,32,25,5,28,0,0,0,0,20,20,0,2,6,126,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341371014317899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844275792953805,0.0,0.0,0.10657871401061983,0.0,0.12107779711786296,0.14734049527778156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322479361772423,0.0,0.0,0.2660924277495835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13352290544128856,0.0,0.0,0.13441474047662635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687408889816632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13533109276926206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103583912109855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34724112823254377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517862135222006,0.0,0.0,0.28657537060650745,0.13486855578781826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147933433434677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254896477625934,0.08645137950703045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998889255192444,0.0,0.1377392558987165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795769410859817,0.0,0.0,0.2843342318829773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12392708968505788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106039653675282,0.2463943144158453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14557878996087187,0.0,0.0,0.2194730223011312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28333386514531245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793127950577878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237164527301345,0.0,0.0,0.07639051734706473,0.10280192180102912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152741724656342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340255633145886
mentalhealth,i_found_rock,2020/02/02,"Ancient Rome  Can anyone tell me why the shitty modern world and it's multitudinous  points of would-be-funny-if-not-so-miserably-stupid fuckery isn't a  direct symptom of Rome ""winning"" history? I see a lot of ""what if Rome  hadn't fallen"" speculation but no one seems to want it to have failed  way earlier. If you ask me, it ended far too late to do any good. Of  course, it could just be that humans are trash. I don't know; that's why  I'm here. 

Sorry, but someone from /ancientrome,  [stitches\_lk](https://www.reddit.com/user/stitches_lk/), told me I shoud ask you guys about this.",7.5303975535168215,7.38458847706422,6.975733944954129,77.40684250764528,63.31192660550459,9.835474006116213,30.093272171253822,9.2995712137729,2.372007951070336,460,13,86,7,6,143,81,109,0.11,0.821,0.069,-0.6304,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,2,0,2,4,3,0,0,3,0,9,1,0,0,0,11,17,5,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,8,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,2,1,8,2,9,13,1,9,0,1,1,0,8,3,0,4,4,48,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454169277243276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486203175593984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974122268381843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16970435412343246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18825673816233884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827735407704282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21045850548177591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681224793122805,0.0,0.2397663283861106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18070291436515484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440297835283585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200929014006439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693753046130888,0.193498078179212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18009342877020967,0.0,0.0,0.23793298850914885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209214516130655,0.0,0.0,0.1857785879365753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031012014783244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12536784749505098,0.1687127683138383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38358770239290657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15098984379324853,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zashuuuu,2020/02/02,"Random Outburst of Sadness Hey, I'm writing this about a random outburst of sadness I had this morning. For some context I'm 16 years old and just got into my first senior year, while we were walking back from church my parents noticed that I had grown a grey hair. Being the supportive and wonderful parents that they are they asked me if I was stressed or had some problems. I answered no, which I thought was the truth but as we were walking back I suddenly had to hold back tears, I got a lump in my throat and for around 3 hours afterwards I started thinking some very negative thoughts. Now I feel absolutely fine, happy even so I'm just very confused about where this all came from. My life is going well, I have great friends, a wonderful supportive family, school is going fine but sometimes I have these random emotional outbursts (this wasn't the first time). I would really appreciate it if anyone could share their own experiences with emotional outbursts or some advice.  
Thanks",4.775963114754099,7.188075322404371,4.668439207650273,81.9636424180328,71.73224043715848,7.635109289617486,31.109631147540984,8.472884824447931,2.6032516393442617,796,36,138,14,16,245,115,183,0.09699999999999999,0.654,0.249,0.986,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,2,0,3,2,13,16,0,2,7,0,17,4,2,0,2,39,36,12,0,5,8,2,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,9,9,0,1,7,0,0,6,3,5,1,2,14,3,22,11,14,19,6,26,1,2,1,0,12,4,0,14,16,99,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248349312065446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932513330595855,0.0,0.0,0.11372377354243447,0.11942815330599388,0.0,0.0,0.2946934917585826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14611092500967224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199725248614633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874010610160059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437706841909366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249631221183646,0.12043047168140344,0.0,0.06459377780220812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173266195952098,0.0,0.0,0.09869862922508016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14520550245489885,0.0,0.2043452330644568,0.14084382155789058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359912806686617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580711951838544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023295951261412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454431844813384,0.13405117913998688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837004903803165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223862523089465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183933758177814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12928889821264825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634711550425828,0.0,0.0904214626775882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14633614976958928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28993630448355723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761419747093847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185645791506292,0.0,0.20283701382430702,0.07449152109591359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21081275469625305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148617730121038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27707687510330864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09074928748747577,0.0,0.0,0.16453244972683334
mentalhealth,UnknownWeirdoo,2020/02/02,"My ex is wanting to kill herself and I don't know how/what to do to help Me (24m) and my ex (23f) just broke up 2 days ago. She suffers from depression, bipolar disorder, and severe anxiety. She went from being all for our relationship and being happy to her wanting to go down to the train. Tracks every day to wait for a train to kill her. I have worried about her every single day since we have broken up. I told her how much she means to me and that I will be there for her if/when she needs someone. She just kind of shoved it to the side and told me "" I wish people wouldn't care for me so much so it would make me killing myself easier"". I am terrified that I am going to get a call from her parents saying she has passed away. I tried to tell her parents about how serious the situation is, but they are all like "" oh this has happened in the past and it will blow over."" 

She told me she went to her therapist and that the therapist said that she does not need therapy. They just want her to continue with her current prescription of anti-depression medicine. I fear maybe she did not tell them the truth or is not wanting to. She tells me she still loves me as a friend but just needs time to figure stuff out with herself. I'm not really asking for relationship advice, more so how do I make sure she is safe. What can I do to help. It has even begun to effect my mental health as well.",3.534686411149828,4.345582355400701,4.561203832752613,87.91992421602791,72.13588850174216,7.969965156794426,24.45452961672473,8.238735603445708,1.1905220905923346,1084,29,239,16,20,354,149,287,0.10800000000000001,0.775,0.11699999999999999,0.8375,3,0,0,1,0,1,31.0,2,0,3,1,16,18,3,1,9,0,25,3,0,6,4,48,52,19,3,10,11,4,0,1,1,4,2,2,0,0,11,12,0,2,4,0,0,5,6,8,1,0,7,2,53,10,41,38,6,23,0,3,0,1,50,8,0,1,11,174,64,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447486901250428,0.08570125149527752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396016392575497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038302845956576,0.0,0.09083432320580434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872139453933844,0.0,0.09857200798992337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870523836158437,0.0,0.16654119930984845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080399836718996,0.0,0.08460558096187744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385642551734008,0.0,0.1629146429847209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879221482796864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469495899609489,0.0,0.05051146576990282,0.0,0.10989128356728928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549406890184293,0.10291797579282813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276663660724944,0.0,0.0,0.12960553265113645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208872785997843,0.10067765359329044,0.053132963790230386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047233110463595664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725774428174306,0.0,0.1290697003141936,0.0,0.09712835481975378,0.10531318815038146,0.0,0.0,0.09743100170109063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214228753264166,0.21506164949667927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147040608619207,0.0,0.09229228477021204,0.06702594597528189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06193587502616627,0.0,0.0,0.20759691855285625,0.0,0.0,0.0919651036863678,0.07688405403697303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922121864580492,0.0,0.0799749422008797,0.10867270655192167,0.0,0.0,0.0819169033998864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720901147673738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067581152133213,0.0,0.0,0.0911200374169244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25350852741860463,0.0,0.11056234740359958,0.2245065569873795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05637505968930021,0.0,0.0,0.27714650582497313,0.0,0.06563957659652793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280981804351667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692719942231683,0.1792472110978969,0.0,0.0,0.11117757225571852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09818353636412068,0.0,0.06867891034579184,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,autisticblackcel,2020/02/02,"Bullying and Redpill/blackpill community has ruined my mental health I am a african american 20 year old living on the east coast ,my dad cheated on my mom so they got a divorce in 2001,i went to private school but was forced to switch do to transfer do to ""change in behavior""so i went to public school in the inner city,i got diagnosed with autism in 2009 i was bullied alot,as a youth i was into anime,yu gi oh,and magic the gathering, and video games,so that made me a target,i was a very skinny teen and i was 5'9"" all my classmates were bigger then me i was a complete social outcast in 2014 my middle school was having a dance all the thugs and altheles got girls to go with them i spend my night at my friends house smoking weed and playing call of duty zombies,my friend was a foster kid he was 17 he was into incel subculture i went on his desktop and PUA hate was on there i got sucked into it even though i am no longer a virgin,i still am sucked into those community,i want to leave,help me",1.4058958517210909,3.7025044174757302,3.069585172109445,89.73285083848194,82.49514563106796,5.4930273609885285,21.499558693733448,6.782984794422108,0.5384640776699023,794,25,162,9,22,262,125,206,0.155,0.7859999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9684,0,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,2,0,5,8,4,0,13,0,19,3,1,1,2,18,32,10,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,3,12,1,1,0,3,1,5,1,5,0,0,20,0,23,3,24,12,2,29,0,1,0,0,16,18,2,0,6,98,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464117632834206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168195199602486,0.0,0.15033608190077205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553240576968018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470421179316564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22155725627727416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148880327128036,0.0,0.4587112255414853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14156266098633954,0.0,0.15241118242488247,0.0,0.0,0.0961077112782193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654466397318156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661127656978907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13567402668123876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444980069830993,0.0,0.0,0.16793037402323205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345567848052971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045807466716996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4353387749152328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14616259808146906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450717004584493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087469472842898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830735615446422,0.08457198400379379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3987570328033749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233501624152407
mentalhealth,Rusty-Unicorn,2020/02/02,"I told my grandma that I was going to start singing lessons and she looked at me in confusion and straight out said ""your voice is terrible"" Thanks grandma for encouraging me. I asked my husband if he thought the same and he said no. I don't understand how someone whom is supposed to be a close family member would actively discourage someone who wanted to be happy and practice a hobby they simply enjoy? 

It's hard not to take it personally. But why is my grandmother so mean? I don't need my family reminding me that I'm terrible at something I just need their encouragement so that I can go and practice and get better.",3.6495454545454535,5.986407833333335,4.987878787878788,78.73227272727277,74.83333333333334,8.696969696969697,30.90909090909091,9.339509955726095,3.18675,500,24,90,13,11,166,81,120,0.113,0.7090000000000001,0.179,0.8645,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,2,2,4,10,0,1,3,0,10,0,0,1,0,24,28,11,0,5,4,1,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,7,8,0,1,4,1,0,2,4,4,0,0,5,5,18,6,9,20,1,9,0,1,1,0,16,6,0,2,1,62,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18039537480866394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17066105550020166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638187391491822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081577210895323,0.0,0.21933187707020504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054138607006512,0.17285792157227284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204123536046974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21019446208512987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861608536406368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16848879938501887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3671060735974738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269956925286817,0.1485531829454118,0.0,0.0,0.1365809752469185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14508498011485416,0.0,0.0,0.17765540744173358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15319193222453345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438545616106844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20088242170484547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381521911269073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17412007651525524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13707615228695633,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,panicpossum,2020/02/02,"Past self-harmers... do you still think about it? A few years ago I stopped self harming after an on-and-off relationship with it, but I still think about it sometimes. Not even when I’m upset or if I’ve had a bad day. I’ve had a really good week but today as I tidied my office I found a small razor blade and knew I should just throw it out, but my mind said to keep it “just in case”, but I caught myself and told my boyfriend what was going on. I have no reason to want to relapse, but I still had that thought and it upset me. 
Has anyone else struggled with this? Still thinking about it years later?",2.326904761904764,3.6437802619047615,3.277968253968253,94.00314285714286,75.74603174603175,5.674920634920635,20.536507936507935,5.6839178017228535,-0.1827244444444447,467,10,106,2,10,149,81,126,0.172,0.7829999999999999,0.045,-0.9432,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,11,6,0,3,5,0,8,0,0,1,0,29,21,12,0,3,10,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,10,6,0,3,7,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,10,1,14,1,13,10,1,22,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,15,71,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14165218086758666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173518348004947,0.16373297017623292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13342549875106016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030571417700738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349156810417026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554573917089492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17521136666822554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081746009568296,0.13403182818644466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14203670263272816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613514467770466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254623692016078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237133785475924,0.164299997026332,0.0,0.17156433390020714,0.0,0.0,0.15200545235451515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334104371233892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804530718905274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5104627840312477,0.1335991278964497,0.0,0.16705662159999435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071782601041937,0.0,0.12686256441719995,0.0,0.0,0.15147077691078742,0.15269480233164792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425359649605024,0.0,0.12818112709621274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20581064677149954
mentalhealth,Caucasian_Ovcharka,2020/02/02,"I need help I've suffering my whole life with something that I can't understand at whole, and it's ruinning my life. I suffer ocassionaly strong headaches in the back of my head, and during this headaches, I've loathly thoughts and visions, like me killing someone that I just meet. I also have an extremely bipolar behaviour, and some times I just lose control of my own mind and I start to act with violence to everyone without reason... I can't stand anymore...",5.851034482758621,7.164956804597704,5.6627011494252875,80.28991379310345,67.16091954022988,9.47816091954023,37.48850574712644,9.725611199111238,3.7920436781609204,370,20,67,8,6,115,60,87,0.191,0.6970000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.8555,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,4,7,1,0,2,0,3,4,1,2,0,17,7,6,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,0,13,2,9,6,4,7,0,4,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,44,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673074468051075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20676775233041064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603172551027548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338411805010229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992227630467953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21397264370313346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974759799362635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23066518583347545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29452772036196145,0.10185851788939404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332488927037652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21051719218774434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545939607306035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21436420150747934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17665434879271982,0.16050710387878087,0.0,0.0,0.14757150501364893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16551912851298334,0.1215731923965506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21704722233955034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4655470957518985,0.0,0.20097856781676893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Katz154,2020/02/02,Help I need advice So I’m 13 and I’ve recently been diagnosed with anxiety. My mom is the one who knew and got help for me as she deals with anxiety and depression to and she wanted me to get help as soon as possible the thing is she is telling the psychiatrist that she sees her anxiety in me but not her depression. I don’t know if I’m depressed as I’m not a professional but I don’t just worry about stuff. I often think I’m a failure and worthless and I have thoughts about ending my life and I keep telling myself it would hurt my family so don’t do it because they’ll be hurt if I do. I also feel like I have no energy a lot. I’ve also went through something last year where I visibly was losing weight and I don’t want to admit this but before I started losing weight I had been saying I was fat and had to lose weight to myself and even though I wasn’t exactly aware I was eating less at the time when my mom started saying I was losing weight and I wouldn’t eat anything I realized it and I was like sh*t I got to stop because my brothers were having trouble with their mental health at the time and I didn’t want to give my mom more stress. So I stopped eating less and tried to be normal again even though I’m unhappy with my weight. Last year I was going through a lot as well as I was stopping going to school because of my mental health and me and my parents were fighting a lot causing me to start self harming as it took the emotional pain away in a way. It was really hard to stop but I knew I had to the night I felt so bad that I just didn’t care and cut so much my arm burned for hours and I had over 30 cuts. When my psychiatrist asked me if I ever had thoughts about ending my life or harming myself or if I had harmed myself I said no I just couldn’t bring myself to say it knowing how much my mom would feel destroyed knowing how bad I was hurting. And I always had these thoughts and feelings because I was always bullied and that’s why I stopped going to school it was just to much when people stared at me like I wasn’t human. I know my mental health is much worse than they think but I can’t bring myself to tell anyone and I don’t know what to do,2.6449216589861737,3.7339675505376335,4.005192012288788,90.01064516129036,74.5698924731183,6.948694316436253,24.038402457757297,7.33818517376401,0.8312531490015362,1721,50,384,19,35,568,183,465,0.273,0.665,0.062,-0.9989,1,0,1,0,2,0,12.0,0,0,3,4,29,28,4,1,13,0,49,17,2,3,2,85,94,54,0,13,17,6,10,3,0,4,8,4,0,2,16,26,9,6,18,0,0,7,16,23,1,1,37,16,78,5,44,50,10,41,0,11,2,0,33,8,0,10,28,273,94,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057707006571946384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09445112336211514,0.09827552390269584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355287298200184,0.0,0.0,0.04129201662472417,0.0,0.04859651237002773,0.0,0.0552076342822793,0.0,0.05548329350424264,0.0,0.09861545380779016,0.1439953836437739,0.0,0.050250710039625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020961523780025,0.06066485262439386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608822088556357,0.1525896915792692,0.059938692848896975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18128133539765398,0.0,0.06642794110806355,0.10460885146216756,0.0,0.0,0.07800938398765966,0.0534178361313997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05567097248832392,0.0,0.08957861851915973,0.04218827803334496,0.0567012200280588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03085334245614701,0.05665009687557088,0.10068545883103347,0.0,0.0944619554272507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05290089575233736,0.0,0.0,0.1883153171650268,0.0,0.0,0.1187482036646672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05815641665899764,0.0,0.18965598360189154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052490018844232864,0.0,0.0,0.16227301094347074,0.09627398592780233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342334853351703,0.08655258624096399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642658374861233,0.0,0.15061711346000747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785380021452687,0.0,0.0,0.2766539055090894,0.0,0.0,0.17364630417665852,0.0437878847239114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05541829500120928,0.057860503208331124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04001660280083496,0.0,0.0628377516330736,0.0,0.0655726161924742,0.0,0.0,0.040940694020698574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06657465184084023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037831584044865633,0.0,0.05830882317397727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056173995246466456,0.1408866291522115,0.0,0.11953185261091175,0.04705849111852548,0.0,0.061606330628229074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04546274983057349,0.0,0.0,0.12539643889450947,0.0,0.0,0.2468594599450336,0.06764629959618468,0.0,0.06760284348181195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15484772205244984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03923293598854384,0.07567899640278161,0.11604075412417315,0.14064713429961356,0.06886986928881017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06561130472193485,0.04009387382727432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449495724370096,0.046874414941510165,0.0,0.35956006920240224,0.05309674965181053,0.05474376464846082,0.053287161689441635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059972329545874635,0.060181197559676124,0.08390071078382054,0.0,0.0,0.07605783946782874
mentalhealth,aaron-kun23,2020/02/02,Why do I feel so miserable when he leaves I don't like being alone but my fiance goes to his parents how every weekend and I hate it so much. It feels like all my happiness is sucked dry when he leaves. I feel so empty and I hate being alone. I feel so desperate for attention for those two days that I have sit alone. Am I a bad person? Am I too needy?,-0.28896198830409503,1.8164828815789456,1.9875438596491253,95.85336257309942,88.60526315789473,5.4830409356725145,16.339181286549707,6.937597516519254,-0.17440467836257326,273,6,64,4,9,92,49,76,0.366,0.526,0.10800000000000001,-0.9799,1,3,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,8,8,3,1,1,0,8,0,0,1,1,10,15,10,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,5,0,1,0,4,12,3,3,13,2,5,0,1,0,0,5,0,1,0,6,42,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5593715119910849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15031784041669405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610469614430785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516833527236372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36411506076403,0.12861373344652205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19164567822488973,0.0,0.35548544031435386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3812523383926696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17590749176195358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323430376898682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19990242250949974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571955763905126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17586351362215552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16244940844067393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,judontdothat,2020/02/02,"I'm caring for my father in the hospital and no one else is helping I literally had to call a depression hotline because nobody wants to or is able to talk to me lmao. Some of my people are too busy, others have the time but don't want to spend energy on it. 

I've spent a week in a shitty depressing motel without a TV. It's been sleep then hospital visit for hour then stress eat then sleep. 

I had a godsend in the form of an unusually long Lifeline call with an unusually good counsellor. I'll get over it but the silence and apathy are deafening.",4.905357142857142,5.239410964285714,6.664285714285715,75.7807142857143,68.82142857142857,10.32857142857143,30.285714285714285,10.290406445055957,3.042610714285714,436,16,86,11,7,152,78,112,0.18,0.6759999999999999,0.14400000000000002,-0.5564,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,11,0,9,3,2,0,0,10,15,8,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,2,2,1,3,3,0,1,4,0,5,2,16,11,2,13,0,2,0,0,6,5,0,2,7,58,9,0,0.20128919463334294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270402474972808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110775464035629,0.0,0.2052277491502788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3467401767715041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20596909801243973,0.16815129325084796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10516529629079097,0.0,0.0,0.16883182635729374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491990416860924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982293100932946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17813460304895196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639876768885567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13954858288553346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4028691265648097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23057609236729615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617886299471042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737334811552608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374511644358956,0.0,0.16146205035781694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19403560060488131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Klutzy_Lemon,2020/02/02,"I can't cry. I can't cry for more than a week, any tips?",-4.806000000000001,-3.674181933333333,-0.8649999999999984,114.6225,101.66666666666669,3.0,7.5,3.1291,-2.891,41,0,15,0,2,15,11,15,0.0,0.61,0.39,0.6259,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792031537564745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9019884964107684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32933622830639125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IRS-Myself,2020/02/02,"Speaking Mantras everyday Disclaimer: I have incredibly bad OCD mixed with depression and subtle anxiety. I think I’m starting to figure out how to beat it without medication. I’m 27 years old and I’ve dealt with this my entire life


So I recently started repeating mantras everyday and 
my life is getting better and better. I repeat different “I am affirmations” hundreds of times a day and now I feel good and I don’t know why. It’s like my OCD is starting to become a super power because I’m harnessing it’s intense energy. It used to be feeling bad for no reason but now I feel genuinely good. I still have bad days but now I make the conscious effort to speak highly of myself even when I don’t want too. Mamba mentality. Speaking highly of yourself enables you to replace those habitual negative thoughts with positive ones. Eventually your mind is just going to bring the positive out of every situation. Remember that we are supposed to be happy, life is supposed to be FUN. Don’t let your parents, friends or the media tell you any different. You are a creator of your own reality and you CAN control your thoughts. It’s just like working out a muscle so just practice positive thinking everyday and you will be mind blown by the results within the first month. 

Since I’ve become aware that entertaining a negative thought is a choice, I’ve gained so much liberty with the thoughts I choose to think about. Staying sad/miserable is easy, but so can being happy. You don’t need an experience to feel something - you can feel prosperous and live in abundance before it actually manifests. It’s all about the thoughts you choose. Thoughts become beliefs and then that becomes our reality. So start believing that you are worthy of greatness, that you have everything in abundance, that you live a life of prosperity and love. Don’t say “I want to feel blah blah blah” or “I wish I had blah blah blah” say “I AM” Like I said I STILL HAVE BAD DAYS, but it’s different now. Once I started to change the things I think about, the things I looked at changed. I can literally look at a piece of poop and see so much beauty in it. 

I know I know; this sounds so cliché but the most effective ways of life/phrases are usually cliché


You’re thoughts are like a radio tuner. Just tune to the frequency that you want (thought or belief) and then put all of your focus on that. Visualize it and see it happening over and over again. Don’t worry about “how” it will happen. Don’t put it on a pedestal and most importantly have FUN. I’ll leave it at this...BELIEVE 


Feel free to DM me ❤️🧡💛💚💜🖤🤍🤎",3.2660889361702097,5.607698694000003,4.465336170212768,81.99632765957448,76.06,7.855319148936171,29.038297872340426,8.718977153904607,2.5007234042553192,2057,92,387,45,47,674,231,500,0.083,0.6940000000000001,0.223,0.9979,5,0,1,0,0,0,46.0,2,17,0,12,27,23,0,0,22,0,38,7,1,8,2,85,86,36,0,5,13,1,7,10,1,2,5,7,0,0,27,24,0,1,31,2,1,4,11,5,0,2,10,18,48,19,50,68,8,52,2,1,4,1,29,16,0,5,34,247,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.06435890123000018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04484910794955109,0.0,0.050452521666636406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22026613810267487,0.04020326662194201,0.29135187290861025,0.056119651687244726,0.14860893669368766,0.0,0.11665703290359605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953534410504512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396992886107921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275992904321839,0.0,0.0568037104068788,0.0,0.0,0.20671504106314176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043560175112668485,0.0,0.05556676809998743,0.0,0.05927272616102181,0.06451297235244961,0.0,0.0,0.2334285164772789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056098095036858336,0.0,0.0,0.05095376804359248,0.0,0.03445680331006069,0.0,0.03748161220085176,0.1106335500103755,0.0,0.07271148009227135,0.0,0.0,0.11664093573316416,0.14041265264870134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936222196612896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10873523791254262,0.0,0.0,0.06983284551219608,0.0,0.06743961602275353,0.2329165726510564,0.12888178730590152,0.0,0.1164723146772765,0.0,0.1107648705780056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059523573235664935,0.0,0.04402296794626559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643894059611903,0.06646334274300604,0.0,0.13318391308834046,0.0,0.052641654295058266,0.0,0.09696350658017636,0.048902012267874224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920473710219767,0.07023592317250174,0.044690270229392336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323105241779182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259843352652384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780886369927018,0.06511889770784157,0.0,0.07470990379998489,0.0,0.06273473637739198,0.10489415372343308,0.0,0.0,0.10510920655316007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545555511238233,0.07413196227345814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05077249024390439,0.0,0.0,0.2334031521820481,0.07029525174063789,0.10533749839440763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05764429477244736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763015291162557,0.16903557839542302,0.0,0.41886337162755294,0.03845670114100285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056960700244176175,0.07263597849757371,0.0,0.1166992585570596,0.05234902825226948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951074026725677,0.0,0.0758406765932329,0.06357464639955898,0.0,0.048013291605362725,0.06697669032603101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04247043927989417
mentalhealth,COMIC_THEORIST,2020/02/02,"Im scared and I don’t know what to do For a while I was a chain smoker, and I stopped smoking recently because of paranoia and panic attacks I would get when I was high, I often felt like things that didn’t happen would happen, an example would be when watching the ID channel and falling asleep i would wake up high thinking I murdered someone and freaking out, and I had serious memory loss, I don’t know what to do because I constantly feel out of control and that any minute cops will come running through my door, I have a horrible time sleeping because I will also have extremely vivid nightmares, and to be honest I don’t know If I murdered anyone or not, This has been scaring me for months and taking a serious toll on my mental health, what do I do?",8.195714285714287,6.347004238410598,8.139413434247874,75.12807947019868,62.907284768211916,10.747776726584675,40.11447492904446,9.23628265651192,3.6931998107852406,604,28,114,8,7,196,90,151,0.245,0.718,0.038,-0.9812,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,4,12,3,3,6,0,23,4,3,1,0,28,34,15,2,5,3,0,2,1,0,6,1,0,1,0,7,12,0,2,6,1,0,3,5,10,0,0,6,4,19,2,12,20,0,17,0,1,2,0,0,6,0,3,9,84,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206170637055579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025681837088892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546241532057893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17158857672002134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758299702113524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12992493079681391,0.0,0.16299144023506773,0.1691663803188883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762631475552161,0.0,0.14481849288518758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880138298186018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26675333069530244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603230665674087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31871603780346713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629200770982309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24867330405743499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368692177774969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199910678356635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038943727819265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769641112863114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489244127337233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020101966807412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15093688437970498,0.0,0.1277960395548211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126098926710925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11340385381952413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020339348095808,0.09664446546909317,0.0,0.0,0.08794899537143883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4285754162501703,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,peachyscreams,2020/02/02,"I feel like I’m drowning some days, yet the next I feel fine. This past year has been one of the worst for me in regards to mental health. I’ve always been an anxious and skittish person, but lately I’ve been stuck in this constant back and forth of feeling fine then suddenly feeling this overwhelming sense of dispare, sadness, and overall negativity. Almost every other day I find myself crippled in on myself sobbing for no clear reason. 
In March I lost my grandmother who basically raised me and I was devastated, and I’m sure that is a factor of my pain but I feel there is something else contributing. I am confused on whether to seek therapy because after I pull myself out of an episode I feel completely fine until it happens again a few days later. I am tired of feeling this way, yet I have no idea what to do about it. 
I am healthy and I am getting an amazing postsecondary education yet I feel like there is something living in me and eating me alive. 
I’m tired and just want to be happy again.",4.8665816326530615,6.175208413265308,5.58326530612245,79.9688775510204,69.45918367346938,7.8448979591836725,31.3469387755102,8.192908349453996,2.3491673469387755,803,34,147,11,14,261,115,196,0.20199999999999999,0.623,0.175,-0.8847,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,10,15,0,2,7,0,15,5,0,1,2,30,31,13,1,1,4,0,8,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,10,9,1,0,11,0,0,1,3,7,0,1,6,8,23,8,23,24,3,30,0,4,0,0,2,8,1,3,22,106,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132402752755445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912418772609823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14815793567379867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084337275611993,0.0,0.07994553807717569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750435025531926,0.14172250805358658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537354496039705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341953566841867,0.10955586538200976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049637375831106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5304918848743608,0.1873818175320976,0.0,0.0,0.11986529858346096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851850390532138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597219769106712,0.13960762410681146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940233339865146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480481555414876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479386847946472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12814286873016165,0.0,0.11580454339109635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316162637105792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216457627593406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13947552702176744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886809457302187,0.0,0.13954885882435594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251939372194341,0.0,0.11451184886218882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484018962482405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201925584318154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360379063330787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997716888407792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014666489898551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735345742162245,0.10409779062980022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08445388660910627
mentalhealth,Shrekderp,2020/02/02,"Idk if i have OCD or not and I want to find out. I have impulses to do things certain amounts of times. Like turning doorknobs or having things in line. Whatever happens to the left happens to the right then to the middle. The amount of times I can do an action is 1 3 5 6 15 35 30 33 35 50 51 53 55 60 61 63 65 75 100 times, so if I don't do a certain routine like turning on taps 3 times correctly I then have to do it 5 times and so on. I don't want to do any of these routines. It's just an impulse. I haven't been diagnosed with OCD, however I have with aspergers. These routines get very frustrating when I'm on a schedule. I've tried not doing them but it feels like a weight on my brain that I can't take off until I do. Do I have OCD or is it something else?",-0.7472888616891034,1.1000900116279055,1.9358751529987792,97.30704406364752,87.83720930232558,5.248959608323133,21.261933904528767,6.5966054737557815,0.21493720930232607,590,21,147,7,19,204,96,172,0.037000000000000005,0.898,0.066,0.6521,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,4,6,1,0,9,0,22,3,1,0,3,21,32,14,0,4,9,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,5,1,0,2,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,1,2,14,5,20,31,2,21,0,0,0,0,1,10,0,5,13,90,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897628823588124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19530910008494465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775769687566177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14615354455680302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846316564459712,0.12498882064560515,0.0,0.0,0.15990689495488314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140744932800568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30942656887405817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900905394203776,0.0,0.0,0.25642444257939745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494117301933903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346899126847115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13154536924808696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23246639247977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5100921477300973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187838479879143,0.38060444399461824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14435727614348431,0.20638752560573248,0.0,0.0,0.21304964836602133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mia6973,2020/02/02,"Not sure how to even put this.. I'm going to regret not making this on a throwaway account, but whatever. 

I've dealt with having depression in the past, I'd say since fifth grade to, maybe half of sixth grade, which led to few suicide attempts. I knew why I did most of it, and that was because of my mom. She was a paranoid, narcissistic schizo and pretty crazy. Recently, she lost custody of me because of her taking me states away from my home state without my, or my dad's consent and she didnt let me pack anything. Anyway, ever since that even happened I've just felt so numb, and it's been hard to have empathy towards anyone, and I've manipulated and lied to so many people. I feel like everyone is going to outsmart me, but I tell myself not to be like my paranoid mother. I can't keep any relationships because I find it hard to talk to people, and I'm pretty antisocial, and very bad at keeping and committing to relationships, as for example, I had a relationship that I was quite happy in, and I'd say I felt something towards him, whether or not the feelings were forced by me or not, and I lost it. I also lost my closest childhood friend a year ago, which wasn't too hard to get over, but a lot to comprehend because I knew I wouldnt have her around anymore, because I've felt like I've had nobody to talk to about my past emotions, or how I feel now. Welp, let me know what you guys think.. I probably need therapy",7.9962980769230745,5.770578576388887,8.250694444444445,75.36759615384616,63.58333333333333,11.083760683760683,37.08440170940171,9.466822959209583,3.2518661324786318,1122,43,228,16,13,371,157,288,0.18,0.7190000000000001,0.102,-0.9707,0,0,1,0,0,1,37.0,0,1,0,5,14,13,0,0,7,0,19,1,0,5,3,54,43,25,1,3,15,3,9,3,1,1,1,2,1,1,12,13,0,2,11,0,1,4,10,7,0,1,18,11,36,6,36,21,3,24,0,5,0,0,20,10,0,6,11,150,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345081904764975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528497718899997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401949387269877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933631379590146,0.06582597260938604,0.0,0.07747048833322764,0.08380595388085417,0.0,0.0,0.08844910123139813,0.0,0.07860427622378365,0.2869391275363877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108399378713023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058965918670849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435923438459735,0.08515643713881406,0.0,0.08995630170217017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428024148740214,0.06725475433905813,0.27117200332504,0.0,0.08604368680144346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273354120503381,0.0,0.049185083254332525,0.0,0.10700564414036773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093214952334622,0.08324907686987673,0.10021544872201736,0.2529970584716101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443166762489164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16735470074560502,0.0,0.0,0.05173774325767196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19253226127049616,0.0,0.1379784432169829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082999238402491,0.08003579380512976,0.0,0.0,0.06284022705343853,0.09544477292544404,0.09457785762796983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025746557638999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980477913334172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797375562544155,0.13053181818211873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19155163646847867,0.10150053189763557,0.0,0.0,0.09463827700017516,0.0,0.10013114471414604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295344017752732,0.30321843466822745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973030543066715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15574975425696375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247477768627124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297559460119336,0.0,0.08872731286209802,0.0,0.07078274238866386,0.15133485121459292,0.0822838790936905,0.0,0.10765908648568097,0.0,0.0,0.0603221149210293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767665215126576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849481215141437,0.0,0.0,0.0907491112245477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062408265306925
mentalhealth,llole,2020/02/03,"Partner with self destructive tendencies My partner is on therapy (6+years) for severe trust issues and self destructive tendencies, the main focus being how he ruins his relationships almost intentionally when he's happy. He told me how's difficult it is for him in this period because he's happy and trying to make all this therapy work so hard, but he's fighting inside to this urge to destroy it.
I'm scared for our relationship and for him, I don't know how to support him without making things worse, so if you have some advice I'd be glad to hear it!",11.815283018867927,8.04432647169812,11.554433962264152,59.42240566037738,57.867924528301884,14.750943396226413,43.481132075471706,12.602617957971056,5.421743396226415,450,18,76,11,4,151,72,106,0.193,0.665,0.142,-0.6535,0,0,0,0,2,0,10.0,1,1,0,1,6,12,4,1,1,0,6,0,0,6,1,17,13,11,0,1,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,1,2,9,5,13,10,3,4,0,1,0,0,20,2,0,3,2,50,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16613248776539294,0.0,0.0,0.1702411573946134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363694433555097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36195910156759264,0.1522961931043218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19161441415772054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17744699994483434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343343419350174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269669239286549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650557327266673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702103686458792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547164747353421,0.19206369863284886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19292612689336971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3888441025498647,0.0,0.11294755429725913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16245250886806273,0.0,0.11542610505662546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638842473180396,0.0,0.12376981393735292,0.0,0.17325542704809138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948131635538663
mentalhealth,Sk8orDye22,2020/02/03,"A nightmare helped me? This is highly likely to be a pure coincidence. But it still spooked me real good.

I really enjoy my job. I do stress about a lot of things in life. Money, time, etc. But I dont hate my situation. Im not suffering from anything mental at the moment, I think? No anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, etc.

Monday - Friday, I wake up at 630. I always set an alarm on my phone because Im absolutely terrible at waking up when I need to. If I didnt set an alarm, I would end up sleeping till 9 or 10. Always, 100% of the time, no doubt in my mind that I will absolutely sleep in.

My phone battery has been failing lately. The charge was rather low before I went to sleep, but I didnt think anything of it.

I had a grotesque nightmare. Gory, Demonic, Horrific images, Innermost fears, the works. I never have nightmares. I couldnt begin to recall the last one I had, but this one was an absolute doozy.

I woke up in cold sweat. I could recall every moment of the dream, the last moment being some demon witch screaming in my face. Trying to ignore the horrible memory, I thought to myself that my alarm hadnt gone off yet, so I could lay there for a while. I picked up my phone to check the time when I noticed that it was totally dead. I started to panic because it could already be 730 or something. I turned my TV on and checked the time,

6:32am

I almost couldnt believe it.

As a professional sleeping-in guy I was awestruck that I just so happened to wake up at exactly the time I needed to. Its almost as if my brain did everything it could to wake me up in time for work.

Some side notes, I dont watch horror movies nor read books or any entertainment like such. Closest thing of that would be the twelve dozen Goosebumps novels I read in middle school, something like 10 years ago. I also put a ton of importance to my job. Im never late, as it means  a lot to me and I do not want to jeopardize my position.",2.4846452395391156,4.337878938144332,4.036361431170409,86.4494815039418,76.62886597938143,7.038932686476652,24.0406306852638,7.928766900206844,1.2805728320194052,1500,49,307,24,34,499,199,388,0.159,0.77,0.071,-0.9858,2,0,2,0,0,0,58.0,0,0,0,3,12,22,1,7,23,0,31,12,11,1,5,47,47,22,2,14,13,0,0,3,0,3,1,1,0,1,17,2,0,1,5,7,3,3,14,16,0,3,16,3,49,6,49,18,8,58,2,4,1,0,5,26,0,12,30,210,66,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558534294220494,0.0,0.1707680867565267,0.0,0.09409586340086007,0.06818915481197904,0.14190037503179578,0.0,0.0,0.057985475212548016,0.0,0.06523013674657868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033735067893288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395772075522013,0.0,0.07255717717971086,0.09606835240411056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518779875959484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723197004473588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344159766753611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19986799474421132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552254449858906,0.0,0.19019374005737366,0.0,0.0,0.07184235320639137,0.0,0.07663379163429887,0.0,0.0,0.09595072094912367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151913677992151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442917900578854,0.07540261553620818,0.0,0.0,0.0841849487904073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715364981095464,0.09009080711786452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763136993539394,0.0,0.1692315742466821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13901034730160547,0.19237306862491727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06022763335779861,0.12497358406071775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498438700662958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288234773470223,0.0,0.0,0.0859305500011898,0.0,0.08609683496694179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264509618961517,0.13152858241598975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707870424119416,0.0,0.0,0.11556022739821024,0.0,0.0,0.10004416298944062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571835128943632,0.0,0.0,0.1705830651010886,0.09705417249790707,0.05462515742300788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629623145294897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584531905741456,0.25599011266590543,0.0,0.0,0.1312876491469535,0.0,0.0,0.060353453230804724,0.0,0.06809550046091696,0.0,0.09767473019748008,0.0,0.0,0.09326985308753387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132971488584472,0.1092731694029672,0.0,0.1353872616612259,0.2983243403560683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05789168560628411,0.09274759651805878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050293545578021855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904471455130918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415290548865715,0.0,0.0,0.12114453174980006,0.0,0.0,0.05491009111932578
mentalhealth,orduhment,2020/02/03,"Is this something I should be concerned of? I don't know if this is the right sub for this and I apologise if this is not, but I need help to figure out if this is normal or something I should talk about with my therapist. Sorry if this text is messy or doesn't make sense, I tried to get everything in it.

So, I have been diagnosed with depression but so far it has got better as I've been in therapy for years now. But, now for the past 4 or so months, I've started to see, hear and experience shit. At first I thought that it was because I was tired, but no, it's not that and this has just got worse each month. Now for the past days I've seen people like visions in my room and I'm convinced that someone is trying to hurt me. I check my house throughoutly at least 3 times a day and if I see a car that I don't recognise on the road, my head says ""they are going to kill you, what do you do? take a knife, protect yourself"" and I get really paranoid. I always think that if someone drives too close to me that they are trying to hurt me and I should hurt them first so I stay safe and in public I sometimes get the intense feeling of not being safe and I start looking around for people who might be after me.

And the visions or whatever they are called, I've seen before. I was driving a month back and I almost did an emergency brake because I saw someone running to the road, but there was nobody there. My friend sat next to me and she didn't react nor see anything, but I was sure I saw someone. I then thought nothing of it, until this kept happening more and more. Yesterday I saw someone standing by my bed but when I quickly sat up and turned on the light as it was dark, there wasn't anyone. And these sometimes can be shadow like things or human shaped, quite convincing and real looking things. What I saw run to the road was shadow like, but it still looked like a person and was enough to make me almost stop to my tracks.

And just few minutes back, a deep man's voice whispered to me ""I'm going to kill you, hear that"" but there's nobody here. But I heard that. And I often hear other voices too, like somebody opening a door or walking in my house or somebody calling my name or talking about random shit. It always freaks me out and my thoughts start running and I slept with a knife for few nights as I was so convinced that I was unsafe.

So, my question is, is this normal? Because some part of me is like no, everybody has these thoughts. But other part of me says no, no they do not have this. And because of all of this, I really don't know what is real and what is not anymore. Someone may talk to me and it takes me a moment to think if I heard that in my head or if it happened for real or if a person I saw was real or not. I don't know what to think about this anymore and I'm embarrassed.",3.1784700251480484,4.07907170017036,4.113184473107811,90.46620244179444,73.05451448040886,6.748908899164437,25.21980206051757,6.7636006534598385,0.7898599334793541,2196,66,483,17,42,709,225,587,0.131,0.767,0.10099999999999999,-0.9748,0,0,2,0,0,0,57.0,0,3,5,4,28,24,4,1,20,0,53,7,5,3,2,114,107,69,2,15,39,0,1,6,1,5,2,10,3,4,44,34,0,6,13,0,1,9,18,10,0,2,35,25,69,14,57,63,11,65,0,4,13,0,31,24,2,28,36,348,113,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283185791099954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662679921697713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12708527975732914,0.044800937110931735,0.0,0.052726155621971214,0.057038052314360065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985354968801108,0.0,0.15623184950057634,0.0,0.0545209240014914,0.0,0.0,0.056666862978962874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085024206373874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264284146627522,0.0,0.055185495365433115,0.06503217397299556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662039541795804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05758417419259896,0.06267513708638464,0.0,0.0,0.032396948876214963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899996290704554,0.0,0.0,0.04950220522708163,0.0,0.1004256101804606,0.0,0.0728276840221544,0.0,0.10248916062718856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331808736111755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13151360876610266,0.0,0.2166428765347216,0.0,0.04294640335900852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786197756278038,0.20577260421261886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177331494652093,0.0,0.1056376057989907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18781533526014005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16141412791923285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553769731482372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797072946672676,0.0,0.0,0.15342602173273925,0.0,0.0,0.04750889954263132,0.0,0.0,0.06814176272615363,0.06012764093622965,0.12555476711162555,0.06147923052429189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13876840906343899,0.1223287804953518,0.08883951950174186,0.11189115970549647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177579214827749,0.06814892267227075,0.0,0.2917138382977602,0.08209288652596901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05471751038199163,0.0,0.10190594580357826,0.0,0.0,0.15317230836389184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315388699144006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32573020333649555,0.09865218328087172,0.12673855535072154,0.0717238465767249,0.13605240024736234,0.06829269182167992,0.05116833027114149,0.05356742559099898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06038751280053276,0.0,0.0963489961359612,0.1544969914578318,0.0,0.0,0.0732724146999936,0.07439303674693619,0.08513375909315761,0.1231650898504196,0.0,0.2034654293542664,0.0373611527730354,0.0736418399125653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050293495187326,0.06969241166256493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529528629311936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04126054818004785
mentalhealth,libbylulu105,2020/02/03,"Ideas for daily practice for recovery? I'm recovering from depression and suicidal thoughts and I'm taking a class in which we need to perform a daily practice for our well being, like writing in a journal. The prompt is very open and can include anything from 15 minutes of yoga daily, to 15 minutes of writing, or a drawing once a day about how we feel. I've been trying to think of something better than just writing a journal entry every day since the prompt is so open for anything we want to do, does anyone have any ideas or things they do every day that help them? It also has to be 15 minutes give or take.",7.6879614325068895,6.494431198347107,7.780785123966941,75.19723829201105,63.462809917355365,9.388980716253442,37.52203856749311,7.793537801064563,3.0093460055096424,489,21,88,4,6,159,76,121,0.066,0.84,0.095,0.168,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,4,0,2,2,6,4,0,0,8,0,10,0,0,1,0,23,20,9,1,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,6,3,18,16,0,7,0,1,0,0,11,4,0,3,4,57,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452020881301489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347435754698426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695851194967736,0.0,0.29883456419750604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058460078304745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3512943987043707,0.0,0.15638664779383882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15889381421664608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059624284980625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180764256894093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741792382409608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217030672940973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4099426222186353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870631220248465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13463243358870305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933669561543821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501972265136917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13978205811759895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986089645082826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730372614076877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062755902166457,0.11634322508953412,0.0,0.14414691862392293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232746418192857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981491012487122,0.10709515109160282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16325393807775654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rilixer,2020/02/03,"I am depressed, and I feel alone. I have many friends at school however recently a lot of my friends started dating, and it makes me feel lonely. I dont even know why I envy that, I dont feel like I envy it but I guess my emotions would beg to differ. I dont understand why I feel alone, or feel sad at all. I guess I just feel left out, but I dont know how to cope.",1.4288211382113791,2.040107573170729,3.554634146341467,93.91943089430895,76.92682926829268,6.930081300813008,23.422764227642283,7.1686216300943375,0.552017886178862,279,8,71,3,6,96,47,82,0.223,0.722,0.055,-0.8626,1,4,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,2,1,23,20,6,0,1,4,0,6,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,9,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,6,16,3,6,19,2,7,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,4,4,43,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698382447181475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11220027048268197,0.0,0.0,0.13610310168115675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.610695948436442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653479306746947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604127080618551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952067190106386,0.0930640102397912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012906028726812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870113962335472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318457975600424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415373616274496,0.0,0.0,0.06364272374301845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107498199559214,0.0,0.0,0.08695539209747273,0.1320720506997612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12862465997413333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183891443223608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922048810500417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561434720211873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350945424791216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253917167868056,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_Ailing_Mind,2020/02/03,"Ask Me Anything: Going through Infertility while having GAD and Severe Depression Hey all, I have GAD and Severe Depression and have been struggling with infertility for 3 years now. My husband and I are in the unexplained infertility category. There is a lot of misinformation about infertility and how it affects people, so wanted to create a post where you can ask me anything about my infertility journey and how it has affected my mental health. Ask away 😊",8.707,9.985290699999998,9.677499999999998,54.17750000000001,60.75,11.9,38.5,11.602472056035307,5.13095,376,18,55,11,5,129,56,80,0.22,0.753,0.027000000000000003,-0.9426,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,1,3,0,8,1,0,4,1,14,13,10,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,8,0,9,12,2,9,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,1,3,45,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322934146962279,0.0,0.5502996844815501,0.0,0.18434913520153226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33799697057945083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151271004638044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20856588035772328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16681378519091364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19773715784417648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602980393889558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879183893776169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4433310337413289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20512505619713536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115731864399412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635512462971432
mentalhealth,Shadowzaron32,2020/02/03,Chronic depression As a labeled chronic depression sufferer I'm curious what it feels like to other suffers of it? what does it do to you? I guess I kinda just want to see if I'm like others or if i may be looking at this completely wrong.,2.9582653061224486,4.583330081632656,5.322193877551023,78.72369897959184,74.71428571428571,8.981632653061224,32.65816326530612,9.516144504307137,3.3921795918367352,190,10,36,5,4,67,35,49,0.29,0.5710000000000001,0.14,-0.8986,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,7,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,9,10,4,0,3,4,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,4,2,6,8,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,6,2,26,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32127789734998785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.527842066804422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681521743759015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549362956673741,0.21890811536707208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3375586527835551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994048650066563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25731751410440723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441788592232273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18073578113729025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33502462547752204,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ellrenton93,2020/02/03,"How do I help someone that doesn’t want to be helped? My friend is so obviously is struggling with things going on with himself, through self deprecating jokes, or stuff he will write on social media about being depressed; but whenever I ask if he ever wants to talk about it, he declines. He’s not been his fun self for months and it’s obvious to our other friends. We really want to help but don’t want to pry. I feel as if he calls out for help but then doesn’t accept it, and i am trying to respect that. But I don’t know what to do, there’s only so many times I can ask him if he’s ok, but as a friend I naturally do worry and would like to know what I can do.",5.845684315684316,4.049908293706295,6.735184815184821,83.16013986013988,67.46153846153845,9.849750249750251,29.51948051948052,8.418075326091056,1.7647130869130858,518,13,121,6,7,174,84,143,0.073,0.6829999999999999,0.244,0.9752,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,2,0,0,0,7,11,0,1,1,1,18,0,0,1,3,31,28,18,0,8,10,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,0,2,10,7,0,0,4,1,0,1,5,2,0,0,1,1,14,9,20,23,0,8,0,1,0,0,26,3,0,4,5,82,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29256449508330895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977764542511802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347709927324796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153986544975233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911805326088897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36267471896680176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892788955756126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41952541164347296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719882481092422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644538664788184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158640271618316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489620761755495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900567440763465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10024137447817226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3264734171007319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595057340131051,0.13258007554315085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16358080021013258,0.17912551431134893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576802880946644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395450065325842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912413599897799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623570548444557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3691701314162663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15890713794079853,0.0,0.11115477690138116,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,laineyhoy,2020/02/03,"People pretend to care about mental health Is it just me or does it feel like so many people SAY they are there for people with mental health struggles but then when it comes to ACTUALLY being empathetic to mental health needs they dont ""get it."" Here is some context... my family wanted to organise a game night. We set a date and everyone says they are down to do it but there is no time or place set to do it.

Fast forward to today... today is the day we set for the game night but there is no concrete plan which makes me anxious. Last night people asked about a time and place and no one responded with a concrete answer. So... it was making me too anxious to think about getting ditched with no plans in the end and i needed the predictability of my evening. Sooo,I cancelled myself going. Welllll... that caused some mayhem and people getting mad at me. So I went into detail about why i need concrete plans in my life and explained the anxiety it gives me... NO ONE replied. That really made me feel ""crazy"" like i just poured my heart out there and no one had the decency to say ANYTHING. Anyways, ive been nervous and anxious with a churning stomach all day now which ended up with me having hyperventilating panic attacks because i dont want to be thought of as ""crazy"" and outcasted. Thankfully my mom and my boyfriend are here for me but GOD DAMN IT, STOP STATING YOU CARE ABOUT MENTAL HEALTH AND WELLBEING UNLESS YOU CAN PRACTISE WHAT YOU PREACH. Just because you dont ""get it"" doesn't mean its not real.",3.4447681770284504,5.60766454109589,4.065342465753428,85.91933087460484,74.82191780821918,6.547102212855639,25.61433087460485,7.468242284971852,1.3202503688092726,1194,42,227,15,26,378,152,292,0.17600000000000002,0.753,0.071,-0.9842,0,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,2,4,3,3,22,11,3,3,11,0,22,7,2,4,1,53,48,24,0,5,11,1,2,2,0,0,5,3,0,0,16,21,0,1,7,3,0,4,11,6,0,3,6,5,30,5,34,40,3,35,1,0,0,0,19,10,1,4,21,160,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.08005329327728324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275574064143667,0.2780250112787111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750694403515399,0.0,0.07669066144972311,0.09332545115751698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001425854333616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727814108500466,0.08427145511663564,0.0,0.07066497674263314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058102114208601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178845494436151,0.0,0.2884295051247833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14531544624987774,0.0,0.0,0.054182644620395966,0.0,0.0,0.07838694650403044,0.0,0.0,0.07733429912698353,0.0,0.08295765124150442,0.05860506413404805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143739424141466,0.07869443161365353,0.04662177937589652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487929745526985,0.0,0.09721061554819398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686861117298783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794299884934383,0.0801552801564178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762249885931878,0.10951658578956844,0.08316954085291864,0.0,0.08935901126885851,0.0,0.0,0.3306836734070478,0.0,0.0,0.09607716071322167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18248138432036876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309498906434479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16676496526234627,0.0,0.0,0.09624915504388012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843600296839661,0.0,0.1714160174768964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337258483928244,0.052553043465997824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957100484302596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858404825501765,0.0,0.08575968703938455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552583164217723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05256403726978282,0.0,0.06512578619890634,0.09566930187063187,0.0,0.1555171689582642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677148813882126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604628554942486,0.0740228725586483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrDiddlez10,2020/02/03,"You are loved I promise One of my good friends took his own life this day last year 2/feb/2019, and it never gets easier to deal with, everyday he crosses my mind and it’s never any easier to deal with no matter how many days it’s been. It still feels like a huge piece of me is missing. I still can’t actually believe this is real either.

I was at a friends birthday party the night he passed away and he was supposed to be there but cancelled last minute, had I known what he was going to do I would’ve found a way to go to him and stop it.

For anyone contemplating suicide, please don’t do it, everyone in this subreddit cares about you even if it feels like no one else in the world does, we’re a community here dedicated to helping each other. You’re a big part of someone’s life, people do love you and people will miss you I promise, the hardest part is not being able to help him or not being able to say goodbye. 

You are loved, you can get through what you’re going through",3.294991789819373,4.431686019704436,4.3362758620689705,88.07797701149427,73.03940886699506,7.1867323481116605,25.848604269293922,7.554174236665415,1.1528472249589488,774,25,167,9,15,252,122,203,0.1,0.677,0.223,0.9805,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,6,0,0,7,13,0,0,8,0,20,5,0,1,2,25,35,9,1,1,6,0,2,2,2,1,2,1,0,0,13,8,0,1,4,0,0,6,8,2,0,2,7,3,18,11,22,24,6,26,0,2,0,3,23,7,0,2,14,109,31,0,0.24120130261247946,0.0,0.11768883882179094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201257846079307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432677949813522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330828183288905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13587563541147402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296040161878287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555548860991448,0.24866795187980975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553844267153784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10074636902879036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965559277593989,0.0,0.0,0.11523909055048268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195862588911464,0.17231425878065446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223238931930945,0.1863515280727008,0.0,0.12601772539838227,0.0,0.2056203881413081,0.10115410445652814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16167214883589595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966112543381887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17036761320515828,0.1178387729080606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32654038910302985,0.0,0.0,0.12227013140381422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177227843817458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18602931416338464,0.0,0.0,0.11317554153873445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634442449889918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611975058339641,0.0,0.1672186131552074,0.0,0.0,0.13238329943836588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726994402918136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590647847442473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218454048787104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19262367183875045,0.10082754463171076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319175382512466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399176107467525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572718350864093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567124248622614,0.0,0.0,0.07766286539354753
mentalhealth,AlarmedRespond,2020/02/03,"Why does mental illness skip a generation sometimes? For example, having a parent with Bipolar disorder does not guarantee you the same fate, meaning that it can skip a generation. Does anybody know why it does that? Why does bipolar disorder skip a generation in some families and not others?",7.2395999999999985,9.820304359999998,7.929000000000002,60.4795,65.4,11.4,40.5,11.20814326018867,5.8498,238,14,32,8,4,79,32,50,0.198,0.802,0.0,-0.8548,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,2,3,0,0,0,8,4,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37515469051915984,0.0,0.7161334656165576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429132633584866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994747879509721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828208859943676,0.0,0.0,0.164938530327294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817335942132199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187152435500196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4430538835365853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IceCreamCake307,2020/02/03,"Riding the rollercoaster... Today I resigned from the best job I have ever had. It was a hard decision but it was an absolutely toxic workplace. I managed to stay for four months until I had a wake up call that it simply was not a good fit. My mental health was getting worse everyday... sleeping in until 5pm on my days off, lost all interest in everything. 

I didn't sleep last night; I stayed up with my child who was throwing up. I knew I couldn't call in. So while he was asleep, his grandmother watched him... I packed up my desk and left my keys and a resignation letter in my bosses mailbox. I feel some guilt; but I feel better not dreading going to work.

For the first time in months, I am cleaning my room: washing walls, cleaning up after myself. I'm sure once the mania wears off that I will regret the decision to leave my job. If not for any other reason than it paid great and I'm a single mother. I know I will feel like I have failed my child. I know I will feel like I have failed myself. 

I don't have anyone else to tell and have been lurking here for awhile too scared to say much. I feel like this is a safe place to get it off my chest so it doesn't weigh me down. Even if no one reads this... that's okay. I already feel more at peace.",2.1325026325026317,3.752458594594597,3.3071551421551426,92.32043085293087,76.95366795366796,6.099052299052299,20.653036153036155,6.782984794422108,0.2030911196911198,972,23,215,9,22,314,151,259,0.153,0.6920000000000001,0.155,0.6713,2,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,7,6,20,0,3,12,1,23,9,6,2,3,32,39,13,0,4,7,1,7,3,0,3,2,1,4,2,13,5,1,1,12,1,1,3,8,9,0,3,13,9,37,11,32,22,6,40,0,6,1,0,12,21,0,3,17,145,50,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376234959541625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242948336415705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475544847205943,0.1241977762485776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720631647828518,0.10720368132913044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24754551274963416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781728189539403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125850577698807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006051611613862,0.1096447455901896,0.0,0.0,0.1089390718882088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677357807491015,0.2597853084394353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103104324768357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266583272257529,0.0,0.06888854808098409,0.10166831389774794,0.0,0.1336385496316011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858368058920076,0.0,0.0,0.1288445117251651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24057181876881975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323177642227485,0.09880535658577964,0.0,0.1283478231918085,0.1316990569227569,0.0,0.0,0.17765669644909246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323190896296569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12215491579282843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935032630685644,0.0,0.08910602816862695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137508610701272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908865137800124,0.08213755088634381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664253402469916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212465179893386,0.0,0.0,0.12462788799564807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639401199538912,0.12135607545589913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24260250986459306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25839538616696794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424249267037125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594613035177604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068069247906597,0.0,0.11489642946509587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824502877726205,0.0,0.12352713201471133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Few-Tiger,2020/02/03,"Why do I LIKE the idea that my intestines can suddenly burst into flames and kill me?  

Okay I know this sounds weird, but I genuinely want some answers to this to help me understand it. A while ago I saw a YouTube documentary about a very rare medical condition called Spontaneous Human Combustion. The theory that was talked about most and made the most sense to explain the cases was that it's caused by spontaneous ignition of the flammable gasses in the intestine.

This made sense as most vicitms never smoked and no external source of ignition was proven, and in some cases a person burned to ash within 15 minutes.

For some reason I like the idea my intestines could suddenly produce the wrong chemicals, maybe produce a spark considering how many neurons are in the gut, maybe an enzyme reaction gone bad, and I'd burn up from the inside out and flames would roar out my mouth before I died.",9.54940909090909,8.564734690909088,8.401628787878789,71.5624431818182,59.66666666666667,12.613636363636365,37.59469696969697,11.698219412168324,4.368469696969696,724,28,127,18,8,223,107,165,0.10300000000000001,0.802,0.095,-0.6706,0,0,1,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,2,3,7,1,0,16,1,8,7,6,9,1,35,16,10,2,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,2,8,9,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,7,2,11,3,20,7,6,14,0,0,1,0,6,8,0,6,7,80,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15820347020703351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14901554488775282,0.0,0.0,0.15186538515852088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18223849625651792,0.0,0.0,0.1833385279953993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249429829753466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18522436634731984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196251202035867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029432992101443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19745134069045428,0.0,0.0980828063457428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17438349740843026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377465040919353,0.0,0.18094123535571005,0.3585955285339521,0.0,0.0,0.1797904120892287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13764757398489338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15583369482186302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18349756089437508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14344795472734173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857942493108719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725698398931375,0.10526661823235432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16104200970673135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678043502481084,0.19512964796821505,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mishi_mishi,2020/02/03,"Feeling like a complete loser! \#help # suggestions

Hey all, I don't know if asking this on this forum is right or not but I wanted to share my situation currently and wanted some opinions on it. I guess some of y'all might've experienced it in your life.

​

 So, I come from an average middle class family from India. I graduated high school in 2017 and started with college in Aug 2017. 

2 years into it, and I had to drop out in mid-2019 due to failing in a few subjects. It was a very hard situation for the whole family. But still, I got enrolled into another college and I'm pursuing another course currently which I'm confident about and love studying.

But now this year, all of my friends from my previous college will be graduating. Some of my other friends have already graduated and started working.

This is where my worry and trauma clicks in. In all this process, my parents have been immensely supportive to me but when I see how much financial problem I've created for my family, I feel guilty. I am ready to earn and learn and when I told about this to my parents, they strictly opposed it saying that for now, I should only focus on studies. What they say is right too but this guilt of not being able to do anything for my family eats me up inside everyday, every night.  


My parents never compared me with any other child but when people ask about my current situation, they have to answer it and they flinch in talking about it.   
In recent times, I've even stopped using any social media because I'm not happy about it. I've stopped attending parties and get-together because the questions of the people make me restless and speaking lie/ avoiding every time just doesn't help.  


I know that me graduating and working is the only way to stop all this but still..  
My daily routine has become like-

1. Wake up, fight life and study hard to get through. Avoid people, Avoid friends.
2. Crib and cry myself to sleep, cursing myself.  


Let me know your suggestions on this",3.9420658823529418,6.306067762666668,4.822403921568629,80.13294705882355,74.04,7.505098039215686,29.429411764705893,8.405096225971981,2.4539976470588245,1581,69,275,29,34,512,198,375,0.154,0.743,0.10400000000000001,-0.9591,6,3,0,0,1,0,50.0,0,3,4,5,18,19,1,5,8,0,20,6,2,3,5,66,44,29,0,5,13,3,4,2,3,2,2,3,0,1,23,21,1,7,8,0,0,2,6,10,0,0,5,10,40,9,49,34,10,51,0,2,2,1,31,23,0,8,26,191,63,14,0.08598953802283378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489159347351564,0.0,0.0,0.09316962852169088,0.10448670072170356,0.11695166912486035,0.18033505636575853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07076206300931705,0.0,0.16077722063394034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483684850536626,0.09496868889132838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407237297262619,0.09015839459751744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09445546976044523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798876470906034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05679527887743389,0.0,0.14489978896520336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32425313430009706,0.0,0.08695778824174549,0.06143094314503456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19930591131050887,0.0,0.089851969059263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877368885065319,0.0,0.09472717067838868,0.0,0.0,0.09153746219426888,0.15405947200379608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527394951007396,0.09085266807436687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177280382995827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793012859779352,0.12147390743657145,0.08402028955723798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760891532131978,0.0,0.057398684349947264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122131102821232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321220452983678,0.0,0.06632043281007724,0.0,0.0,0.08069535634337237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079783700670053,0.0,0.0,0.286443617395849,0.0,0.0,0.17884295571741185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228037474707706,0.0,0.0,0.09632796221584594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490429494238519,0.0,0.0,0.1468691912652932,0.0,0.1367646640061876,0.0,0.0870260032414432,0.06852252870118024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899675306742268,0.08605163863880874,0.08765550509640997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172767519657007,0.0,0.13734271228449912,0.21567331243116294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975799087261836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911513343694503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028238226132263,0.0,0.0,0.08216668858151363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426735193452072,0.0,0.07095037442178039,0.10143771487594974,0.06825449279898851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600424833905463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520281562215602,0.08732654989369325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448670072170356,0.1107488864179153
mentalhealth,CrispyRamenNoodles,2020/02/03,"Mental health and the negative impacts of a relationship Unfortunately my gfs mental health has deteriorated significantly in recently months. I am not familiar with how it feels to be her or the triggers of it. I would support her as much as I could be it is now having a negative impact on my happiness and emotional well being. Granted not as much as hers. I am not depressed by any means and have no illness but it is causing me to no longer see my relationship as happy or enjoyable. I love her but I'm struggle to find the strength to stay with her. And I think she knows this given she has indicated she might cause self harm if I leave her. Ideally we work through this but I'm in experienced and have no idea how to address the issue, I also feel I'm not trapped given the potential injury she my cause herself. What do I do?",2.7647560975609764,5.1188580975609765,4.812378048780489,78.81661585365855,77.78048780487805,8.002439024390245,27.93292682926829,8.841846274778883,2.4878243902439032,664,29,127,16,16,228,95,164,0.147,0.662,0.191,0.8901,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,3,5,11,0,1,7,0,17,4,0,6,0,35,30,19,0,4,10,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,7,8,0,0,7,0,0,0,9,3,1,0,2,4,26,8,19,22,2,7,0,1,1,1,16,3,0,4,3,103,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197121965476918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521608531023748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4315068342271174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179185707459274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205960872649538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749982255919856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14159319393340022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797263032389272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29810053587407664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976621839538001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806169177523038,0.0,0.14614094670837918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694945832557529,0.0,0.0,0.14825735627173053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637044271989742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15251911816372835,0.0,0.0,0.282207589044587,0.1485354796210882,0.0,0.0,0.11175990951410814,0.0,0.20585661424755847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382494948714032,0.3006508444695137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157509742796608,0.0,0.14606784405202008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492390594294572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14637574493623134,0.0,0.0,0.15888917162726432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971697982860903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589173334494952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101933748039403,0.0,0.0,0.0994637711226482,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,canyounot--,2020/02/03,"Should I get help or am I just delusional? I'm 14 and for the past five years, I've been very depressive in mood and my ability to empathize with others each year has been getting worse to the point where I'm almost unable to express my emotions in real life. I constantly feel like everything is my fault and that the world would be better off without me. Every corner I turn, I feel like everyone is watching me and that every little giggle, whisper, or laugh is about me or how I look. No one has ever once in my life told me that I will never be good enough and I haven't been abused by my family. I grew up in a pretty positive environment but I really feel like it doesn't affect me positively at all. I think of suicide all the time every day and these thoughts always interrupt brief moments of happiness or pride and I go right back to criticizing myself again. I'm just this pessimistic lack of a person. I have no motivation and really believe I don't deserve life because I have done nothing to deserve anything. I don't wanna talk about this because I'm submissive to everyone. I do everything I'm told and no one takes me seriously. The one time I tried to get help, my lack of ability to express myself made even the doctor not take me seriously and it feels ridiculous. My parents, friends, and other people I sometimes try to ask for help never take me seriously. My mom think's I'm perfectly fine and I can't say anything to her because I'm scared she'll punish me in some way, even though she hasn't hit me as behaviorial punishment since I was six. I'm really scared and can't say it because I was taught that boys can't cry for my whole life. I know that isn't true and always have. 

I want someone to tell me if I do actually need help or am just delusional. And if possible, I want someone to tell me what it might be and whether or not I'm really mentally ill. Sorry for turning this into a bit of a vent.",5.1583141517476605,5.40624756265985,6.487023657289004,77.57108109548167,68.25831202046035,9.790323955669226,30.869671781756182,9.725611199111238,2.7809615515771524,1531,57,304,32,24,521,190,391,0.18100000000000002,0.6679999999999999,0.151,-0.9437,1,0,0,0,2,1,28.0,0,0,0,4,13,24,3,2,10,0,35,6,0,4,7,66,71,29,1,10,16,2,4,3,1,5,6,3,0,2,16,19,0,0,9,0,0,3,17,10,0,5,11,9,52,13,37,51,9,32,0,1,2,0,22,15,0,11,16,206,68,3,0.0,0.09631709590285277,0.07932874567557298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140166199941265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352820258787219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337919022556822,0.0,0.07599654840887038,0.0,0.0,0.06250812055129877,0.0,0.1982180958485752,0.0,0.0,0.09158764614361983,0.0,0.07189569676931146,0.08874922801514462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784719685715175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929485970498137,0.052426271350325127,0.0,0.07001622169080299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320526142313274,0.0,0.08318939486967973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144195920999564,0.0,0.08399581632728692,0.0,0.10738449498219604,0.07353278622119976,0.2054747018845632,0.15535496139963442,0.1461190582580605,0.0,0.07663436064015179,0.0,0.16441363366240572,0.17422392150267013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280558600428851,0.0,0.12741430948962013,0.0,0.046199814244277666,0.06818342594596559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653627857780448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179518279935902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04467566448713795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22967426978817265,0.1191447142353947,0.0814754062959381,0.0,0.0,0.06826435877508795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691995192983178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192267910799368,0.08623740044941039,0.0,0.09520758404093194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060276592982193976,0.1253939821244625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800135534282197,0.0,0.0,0.08657275963628905,0.16525560630054054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026455426957487,0.0,0.07760190388444932,0.05635726789393436,0.0709805737114778,0.0,0.0,0.07684671234790387,0.09164391514327394,0.0,0.08270264708114215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252748678470947,0.20830958222549492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942246892784185,0.0,0.1292924752373162,0.1627738804100222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724514181536602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775599293000576,0.0,0.08039933980339456,0.0909991422416164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891967111619736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18336319974489104,0.06533900217102664,0.1421046510197304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417657971453416,0.07986845390901127,0.0645363447122648,0.09480341665354823,0.0,0.0,0.15535496139963442,0.0,0.11038314040533437,0.1768435460376175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670739740755794,0.0958956272369836,0.06452538295746878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075902018443008,0.0,0.07836207361001714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284295013010097,0.0577471260226404,0.0,0.0,0.10469807942569748
mentalhealth,sunnybunny23,2020/02/03,Can I be a psychologist if I am prescribed antidepressants? I am an aspiring psychology therapist but my mental health has been steadily declining to the point in which I'm considering antidepressants. Would this compromise my career?,9.073070175438597,12.03627771052632,9.534210526315793,49.26780701754386,61.368421052631575,14.540350877192983,41.614035087719294,13.023866798666859,7.428919298245614,195,11,25,9,3,65,32,38,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,7,1,0,0,0,3,8,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,21,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4805945024110345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.455642077310538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4274102852828664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5249593671909318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211811521078768,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hdjdjdhdjdjcnfnfjfjj,2020/02/03,Why do I feel hollow when I’m not in danger As the title implies I feel downright awful when I’m not putting myself I some sort of risk. It can be minor like waiting till the last minute to do something or it can be something as major as taking a joy ride or running from the police (not admitting I did that). When I’m not at risk I feel either nothing or deeply depressed. Why is this and what can I do?,2.074136212624584,3.4643332906976734,3.745614617940202,90.09058139534883,76.55813953488372,5.379401993355483,23.913621262458467,5.288315135182226,0.364752823920266,317,10,67,1,7,106,54,86,0.08800000000000001,0.777,0.135,0.638,0,0,2,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,2,4,1,10,0,0,0,0,16,19,11,0,0,8,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,0,0,3,4,4,0,0,1,3,7,2,9,16,3,10,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,5,6,48,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479126783122963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4366155080350949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346247127457112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062210394275804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761863529343832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893546263097162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44318034687491104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164168095855214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5194543420606001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chocoboyc,2020/02/03,"Witnessed madness Hired a girl for an event (ceremony) as an assistant and saw her progressively fall in to something so strange and scary, that it has left me in an extremely uncomfortable state having reached home. 

I'm an event manager. We were at the event, she appears very normal but is a chatterbox and has very kiddish sensibilities. She had a couple of drinks which should have gotten her high but not what I witnessed. She started talking in tongues and shifted context and sentences, she lost the ability to form a sentence, starting a sentence and leaving it midway. She started talking about her mom over and over and how she was calling her (her phone was always ringing). Her mom seemed to have an insane amount of control and commanded her attention at the cost of the job for which she was called.

At first I began to take the issue seriously, like I would ask, hey what's the issue, why are u on the phone all the time. She would start saying something about her mom and her ex and I realized there was no end, it was a ramble and I began to become frustrated. 

By the time the event was getting over she was crying, calling people and constantly coming over to me and literally talking nonsense, like the words and sentences made no sense. I had to constantly keep her in the room or tell her to sit on a sofa but she would always get up and start giving me her phone with someone or the other on the line. I was extremely frustrated and finally had to tell her to leave the premises.

When I came out. She was sobbing on a chair in the parking of the place. At that point I was exhausted but I decided to drop her home. This is the thing that frightened me. Before we arrived at her place, she started to ask if I have met her mom three days ago. When I said no she said I had talked with her mom and met her, her mom knows who I am and so on. I dropped her home. 

This whole experience has left me feeling disturbed. I have seen evil, I have seen stupid but this was something that could not be negotiated with.",4.521434588049488,5.954235389312978,4.978124067737124,83.50900763358781,70.42493638676845,7.8634377467754675,29.836711415284725,8.326086129247049,2.0969805913836974,1600,64,311,24,29,509,181,393,0.166,0.785,0.05,-0.9946,1,0,4,0,0,0,38.0,2,0,0,4,8,12,5,1,31,0,35,2,0,3,1,56,67,33,0,7,10,7,1,2,0,4,1,4,5,1,17,27,1,2,6,1,1,4,5,10,0,2,29,8,57,2,46,32,4,59,0,2,3,0,65,28,1,5,25,229,74,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683249880905935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546819629526598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096698791419546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326708203055454,0.06415499710254112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309580327427044,0.08623099507868162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494551444810646,0.0,0.16294891014040636,0.0845611194845728,0.060196214462331935,0.08342236003943622,0.08281709941028485,0.04862308693328106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385771207466796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06677697247624402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375009341493155,0.0,0.0,0.03812162393337077,0.0,0.0,0.08259077150658696,0.0,0.06413035391960074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878082098012051,0.07232508352707936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965821844607794,0.22687989355051635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15738412438959593,0.07481721021590622,0.06701391889206465,0.0,0.0,0.04143473610100129,0.0,0.0,0.15966335737309706,0.16383225728521755,0.0,0.0,0.07366769431553452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823017857624683,0.0,0.0,0.07133991056880334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5298053647106666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387040725902061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052268915289013514,0.0,0.15754199538236224,0.0,0.07127198404137129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14343449075379905,0.059956574264785366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863614002297777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388134657772665,0.17412664903763975,0.0,0.0,0.32018684582178153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05668713141918001,0.2423963330496107,0.13179588443329318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05008862347784638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792604644177035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441638851805588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803162982359881,0.0841750445862976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606738447971983,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowAwayAccount8237,2020/02/03,"Convincing Yourself of something you may not have done Hi Everyone,

I was out drinking with some coworkers last Friday night. I remember specific conversations and talking to specific people - except for what I talked about with 2 people. 

I have convinced myself of something I had talked to them about (something that was told to me a long time ago that I would never tell them in the first place - no matter how drunk I was) 

I’m wondering if I’m adding a worst-case scenario conversation with them because I don’t really remember what we talked about OR if I really did tell them what I wouldn’t have had I been sober. I also could have dreamed it because I don’t remember their reaction to what I said.

Has anyone else convinced themselves that they talked to someone about something that they didn’t?

This is all very strange and I’ve been obsessing over the “Did I or didn’t I?”",10.447321428571428,7.7807638511904775,9.433095238095238,70.17857142857146,59.29761904761904,13.171428571428573,41.26190476190476,11.491704259439757,4.573990476190477,709,29,130,15,7,223,94,168,0.06,0.877,0.063,0.1197,0,0,5,0,0,0,12.0,1,1,7,1,6,4,0,1,4,0,24,2,0,1,2,26,29,8,0,5,6,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,10,7,2,0,4,3,0,0,8,1,0,1,14,1,27,3,19,11,2,11,0,0,0,0,21,4,0,7,7,98,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214116912489247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116791489721258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845690924836519,0.12962177205741413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423546273995914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10100585773374698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12946098344708182,0.0,0.12392908133819823,0.0,0.0,0.10568069212792704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088323347998373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076071221799402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10312040840232134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11195506010211342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757029889212136,0.0,0.0,0.11871861663171665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754085923420657,0.0,0.1321732978959909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16208774819560814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42992463866951897,0.0,0.1203374987662757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107189301883886,0.38956628081334665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5084092444573812,0.22114607159047708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376747705244524,0.0,0.0,0.12088323347998373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438184652180303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719186912312764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986722091013064,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,selfdevelopnetwork,2020/02/03,"MASTERINGTHEGAME.COMPANY LIFE MADE EASIER YOUTUBE 
MASTERINGTHEGAME.COMPANY",35.735,46.88626916666666,26.08333333333333,-81.255,24.0,22.4,56.0,13.023866798666859,14.6532,69,3,3,3,1,20,5,6,0.0,0.6409999999999999,0.359,0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5981889165983991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.80135511482665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,danny196196,2020/02/03,"im tired and i want this all to end im honestly speaking so tired right now, nothing matters and no matter what i do i still feel this same shitty cloud of dread above me wherever i go. i got really fucked over by a person i loved with all of my heart, my parents got divorced and i had to move away from my friends. my grades are going to hell, im losing weight, hair and sleep and im just so tired all the time. i get enjoyment only from gaming with my best friend, and im afraid thatll stop soon too. im just so tired and i honestly dont think this is a battle i can win.",-0.3536557930258724,1.5865316377952752,1.8848650168728904,97.70624015748032,86.95275590551182,5.203374578177729,16.945444319460066,6.5431188927421005,-0.38172170978627706,446,10,109,5,14,150,78,127,0.237,0.552,0.21100000000000002,-0.5966,1,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,9,14,3,2,3,0,7,10,3,0,3,21,17,10,0,1,2,1,3,0,2,1,4,1,0,1,5,9,1,1,2,1,0,3,2,6,0,0,3,4,16,8,12,13,5,12,1,1,0,2,8,3,2,0,6,64,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955823473826253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120443265222403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419097554579893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385413096263057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053579426447096914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373762690231425,0.0979635540101124,0.05536268877899618,0.0,0.12044546399374778,0.0,0.16950085220774402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125569828646152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6867666416196572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854847928113335,0.0,0.0,0.0956381539635663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262473690298995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016769178630523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059166670450735,0.0,0.0,0.1176623358667982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252513538277136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788432133306993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049410282684332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060421967100314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462432060064091,0.08859204458974322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789852235473474,0.0,0.0,0.061789434080048986,0.4871677959674783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250129738866092,0.0,0.0,0.12903763821958902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frogianman,2020/02/03,"is there anything i should know before my first assessment with camhs? not sure if this is the best sub but here! im 17 and was referred to camhs in july (was 16 then) for issues with anxiety, so obviously i am anxious about my assessment with them tomorrow, and was just wondering if theres anything i should know or prepare? the only thing i have done like this was when i had my appointment to get referred. thank you for any replies!",4.825803921568628,6.045134423529412,5.205588235294119,82.97348039215687,69.47058823529412,8.960784313725489,30.637254901960784,9.2995712137729,2.6074313725490192,346,14,68,7,6,110,59,85,0.073,0.8140000000000001,0.114,0.6826,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,1,2,7,4,0,0,2,0,12,0,0,0,2,20,17,9,0,4,6,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,10,4,9,9,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,4,5,52,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672278947206457,0.0,0.18812122174536627,0.2778094044355089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4047275566628865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092521263671601,0.0,0.2580683953319759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25165230449841824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091717485530596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284783341248708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265626050064307,0.25666716680166546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702924799681186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013968027660447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18702637662479624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317681824172665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264017853448754,0.0,0.0,0.1633723239483751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666799610509113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,2727throwaway27,2020/02/03,"Can someone help me? I don't know what I need My ex messaged me apologizing for her actions in our relationship that ended 5mo ago. I've been doing well mentally until this. Confident, content, doing things finally. We talked, she thought it was all good but then more stuff came back to me and I ranted. A lot. Contact is now cut again. It's like I'm back in the relationship: I'm suddenly anxious, depressed, suicidal and feel generally crazy again. It's the same old thoughts but they havent been thought of in ages and I'm scared I'm going to have to work through this once again.",1.6809689440993798,4.321186817391308,3.004875776397516,88.14967391304349,85.17391304347825,6.416149068322983,25.6055900621118,7.7094869923839395,1.6239937888198757,464,20,93,9,14,150,83,115,0.192,0.72,0.08800000000000001,-0.943,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,2,0,1,1,7,6,1,1,3,0,10,0,0,0,1,17,22,7,1,1,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,5,0,0,3,2,3,1,0,7,1,12,3,10,15,4,20,0,1,0,0,13,3,0,1,15,61,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562310389438709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19910729617163256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710438856344023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201577947710674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180002707760715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561012377719999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911504162598698,0.0,0.0,0.19306837645730607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016440310407357,0.14782639872441386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813367171234715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685994066926998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861046693196166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14983765721619965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17761405295163304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130683836200845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18494004864759894,0.18769575020781348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3784435081306377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17645253383484288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14933227580619612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20175897922431807,0.19278401714932464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14165949060471109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708970672441095,0.0,0.0,0.41975782061223776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584659085051747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830885365714592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yungtort,2020/02/03,"why am i so scared of friends not liking me/abandonment i have great, healthy friends that i get along with well. we hang out and text a lot so i have no real reason to feel this way. but im constantly scared that i did something wrong or that they just don’t like me any more. i think i just have a deep-rooted fear of abandonment but i don’t know where this comes from or how to deal with it",0.9493235294117676,2.72032385882353,1.8808088235294136,100.50238970588236,81.0,5.661764705882352,18.86029411764705,6.6274283507984215,-0.30967647058823555,308,7,77,3,8,96,58,85,0.253,0.603,0.14400000000000002,-0.9237,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,1,0,7,11,0,3,2,0,7,0,0,2,0,22,12,8,0,0,7,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,4,0,0,2,4,5,1,0,1,1,11,6,9,11,2,6,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,3,3,51,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243982503622735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18043104344196592,0.0,0.22635159744447805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21594382363438366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357004724716904,0.10590915234794712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32365619459945016,0.0,0.1094340837350338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23093013386394295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262524930988856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511361073934995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466292501133945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17807520454484452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238411072755098,0.0,0.2153595271525598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4194115369777497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612523628146698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13421336182776045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662594144226323,0.0,0.0,0.18832948669056426,0.0,0.18900486138942868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22901137494721005,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gaylord678,2020/02/03,Psychosis My meds seem to be making it worse I see and hear hallucinations and I feel numb all the time. I just got discharged  a couple days  ago  from the mental hospital and I'm already relapsising please help,3.5875000000000017,6.229834750000002,4.535,80.36,76.5,7.0,25.0,8.07648339933343,1.6594999999999995,170,6,31,3,4,55,34,40,0.133,0.747,0.12,-0.128,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,8,8,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,2,6,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,3,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24584571922219936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30605226242482725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30687211264841113,0.0,0.17886175125769255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023174684211173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218146233777616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31258302680954364,0.0,0.18589556648160885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18512701244091614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3080628985419142,0.0,0.2794941062099176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3044367087219101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22100456076669786,0.2524804774514468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16171954147337214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826337780272382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,silentguystrangersok,2020/02/03,"I want to understand what’s wrong with me. I am fine with strangers but not with friends Hello,

I have a peculiar issue. I’ll try to be as descriptive as possible. 

I am a guy, 25-30, employed, pretty average. 

My friends say that I used to be very social, energetic, funny and lively. I was always up to help anyone in my university and many appreciated my openness. Since the last year, they say that Ive turned into a very silent, always into my phone, always anxious and uptight person. 

The thing is, when I’m talking to strangers or new acquaintances, I am perfectly fine and almost always have something to talk about. But when I’m with my friends I barely talk or interact. I talk as much as I can but pretty soon I start looking into my phone for something or the other. 

This is seriously affecting my relationship with my friends and my girlfriend. My girlfriend says that me not being social and not enjoying my time when outside is a major issue for her. She says that she cannot be with someone who does not enjoy spending time with others. I am perfectly fine and have the best time when I’m with her. But my social anxiety/awkwardness combined with her frustration with her job and the cold weather where we live is taking a toll on her. I try to make things as good as possible, I cook her favorite dishes and help her with everything. But my issues and the situation I got myself in are really hurting her. I cannot lose her and I’m trying my best to be my old self. But she knows that I am just pretending and am not actually enjoying anything. 

I don’t know what happened to me, why I changed. I need your advise. Have I just turned into an asshole somehow - Someone who doesn’t care about their friends anymore ?Should I go to a therapist? What kinds of therapy are generally available? I just want to understand what’s the root cause here so that I can fix it. 

Thank you for reading.",4.116703111858706,5.823545411924123,5.233660405569573,80.20292682926829,71.84552845528455,8.341687692738997,29.5263059527147,8.939507131559953,2.5147251845621903,1503,62,281,30,29,496,175,369,0.10800000000000001,0.679,0.213,0.9932,2,0,2,0,0,0,42.0,1,2,2,5,14,26,1,1,14,0,30,2,0,5,2,65,53,32,0,4,17,0,0,0,7,1,0,4,0,3,18,29,2,1,4,3,1,1,9,7,0,0,2,6,61,19,42,45,4,24,0,2,1,0,48,10,0,5,13,205,79,4,0.0,0.0,0.07944113336880372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081516986462687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27094736891932786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196632683327212,0.08073350797240889,0.056921412461354765,0.0,0.06699072486426802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17086248349773284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299949053682704,0.08362703932635768,0.08611742640770671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123949546737401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731630350130249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144728239166451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046265267069812537,0.06828002369112568,0.0651083231856633,0.0,0.0,0.0806053680496318,0.07198761907638873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913030382720916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714748718039325,0.0,0.0,0.25490213260507066,0.08078352465583706,0.0,0.0,0.0847724838631722,0.08947791599723967,0.06635727327269654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376710147652055,0.0,0.06836107118050004,0.09107320230750207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05433956144483803,0.0825335512960561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059843243987453686,0.06036198885204401,0.0,0.07862303601016364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542257006907993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108113426964234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835475002998293,0.0,0.165639629387186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142866546508072,0.0,0.052151175348379805,0.0,0.0,0.08740026113023712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25895129644216963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492487513482991,0.0,0.0,0.06734041026194544,0.09150446930115963,0.0,0.24895143986879856,0.13795115646300085,0.12534161061942306,0.0,0.0,0.057620035727242086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061207658845536875,0.2617262805026997,0.0,0.07494829280157296,0.09309558255110856,0.09451937843264033,0.10816590295261468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424065917478355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165809285850861,0.1770940862173803,0.0,0.16949435739029478,0.0,0.07030919575066892,0.0,0.134338000046168,0.09603148578667196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345682670299639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900537668103092,0.0,0.05242320435223726
mentalhealth,junebugslayer,2020/02/03,Are these signs of anxiety? Ever since I turned 16 I’ve suddenly began to be so focused on when to give eye contact or not. I never used to have this problem and would communicate with people normally but now when I’m having a conversation I kinda look around and sometimes lock eyes for a few seconds. When I do this I feel like the person is thinking I’m weird or nervous which makes me nervous to get into social interactions. I also feel so exhausted every time people are talking to me and I feel like I have to try so hard to react to whatever they’re saying. Could these be signs of anxiety? Or am I just going through a phase atm.,3.662812500000001,5.22334840625,5.350437500000002,79.50081250000002,72.75,7.932500000000001,27.64375,8.548686976883017,2.1239881249999994,508,19,95,9,10,173,85,128,0.153,0.78,0.067,-0.8462,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,2,4,0,12,3,2,3,2,28,26,14,0,4,6,0,4,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,5,6,0,0,4,0,1,1,2,5,0,1,1,8,11,2,16,21,1,13,0,0,3,0,8,3,0,4,11,69,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15253670480402454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918349740710109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698012608259296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522923618645655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17253750746840454,0.1607087791847018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28933541081185504,0.2725329539126973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996550813357183,0.182977582407334,0.10840335590211647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708678103976773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18637429713208853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601756565642946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732209694112484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711237149514506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868871472044686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644736594339788,0.16654898986168087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18251480793582076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516860883304565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15778416342447335,0.0,0.0,0.19443795347756304,0.0,0.0,0.18864920540415572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331159275196138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222008932491132,0.0,0.0,0.11122348308471976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295016338343271,0.2074730621074156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16474027392191212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549799619231204,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,4erek,2020/02/03,"I don’t know what to do So over the past few years it feels like I’m getting worst and more distant from reality and people. 

Nothing feels fun anymore and I can’t have an emotional connection with anyone, not even my parents or what were my closest friends. I can’t really distinguish what I’m feeling and it seems like what ever I feel in my head, something like anxiety, I don’t really feel but my mind observes it.

I don’t feel depressed I don’t feel anything. Any feeling there is such as like fear, it feels like a tiny light in the center of my head and my brain just numbs it and it goes away.

I have tried looking into this but have gotten no where and don’t have the insurance or money to go to a doctor or therapist, which led me to reddit (this is the first time ever using reddit).

But if anyone knows anything or has this same feeling and can help anything will help thank you.",2.9489134438305697,4.649393541436466,4.045281767955803,87.55197421731123,74.91160220994476,6.8156169429097595,25.32633517495396,7.554174236665415,1.2409997053406996,705,24,143,9,15,229,101,181,0.10099999999999999,0.741,0.158,0.7814,1,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,8,12,0,1,7,0,18,5,3,2,2,40,39,18,0,1,10,1,10,5,1,1,2,0,0,0,14,10,0,0,14,0,1,2,9,4,0,1,2,12,16,8,13,36,4,16,0,1,1,0,5,8,0,6,11,99,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770024512551499,0.0,0.08662307943124765,0.0,0.11229689653611427,0.15835055669937634,0.0,0.2795437986492416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10638630820286804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264056870656564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752757951479206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589896674700972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737209652963413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478945321615084,0.20485180382346385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274188180005212,0.5725410248905372,0.24268143792115665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631609247259708,0.0,0.0,0.08748368071125075,0.0,0.05915966757411935,0.0,0.06435303060446733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23241983878697514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15179563907995966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12445999842398946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27660008187516844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508736001014748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433324144474663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865029848444216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573205581942426,0.0,0.10809389122726716,0.07850163566429777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450801603798815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030832422615828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08717244074300377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10424990680663856,0.0,0.13147245954103112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602718293471832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687790231322776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779711892921346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291846103413054
mentalhealth,Mrluukyy,2020/02/03,"Started a blog about gaming, depression & other stuff  Hello there,

so I basically started a blog called ""Gaming, Depression & other stuff"" and yeah you guessed it, it's about gaming, depression & other stuff.

[https://mrluukyysoftware.code.blog](https://mrluukyysoftware.code.blog/)

Those are very personal topics for me and I thought it's a good idea in a tough time to release some tension in this blog and say things I was never able to say in the past. Maybe I can even help people that struggle with mental health or are scared of ""coming out"" with it. That would be great actually!

I'm aware that I could improve the looks and the design but for now I just wanted to start. I plan to release a post once a week, just write down what's on my mind and see where this takes me.

I just want to share this blog in case anyone of you is interested in it. Feel free to share if you like it.

Thanks guys and have a nice day!

Mrluukyy",4.228017241379309,6.7213351781609205,3.84205459770115,86.88653017241379,73.65517241379311,6.189080459770117,21.219827586206893,7.1686216300943375,0.4872655172413794,747,18,143,8,16,224,106,174,0.073,0.73,0.19699999999999998,0.9744,0,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,3,0,1,10,16,0,3,10,1,9,1,0,0,1,28,23,10,0,5,6,0,1,1,0,1,1,2,0,2,21,10,0,0,3,7,1,1,1,7,0,0,2,5,14,10,22,18,1,20,0,3,2,0,16,9,0,4,10,95,35,0,0.12255706313932205,0.0,0.11959801455507955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39837158012296603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569474814066726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12514446416636835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557205795052596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978518423577578,0.0,0.0,0.07903916683199777,0.0,0.3166746566918229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094778434033134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061968533550962025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279504988078687,0.0,0.1351195947755434,0.13501042225343532,0.12135076090194727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302724270904561,0.0,0.0,0.08214741603027155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835200658729813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059875190453495535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291706625193872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312504271235185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350869391555107,0.0,0.12374769667926593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945235624963292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051927241353695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699458438723408,0.0849656362074402,0.10701210028696076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737578858614595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949245913774259,0.1227010004549905,0.0,0.09766211180558454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602395602632629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281232523844953,0.4208955473221954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214765906607174,0.0,0.0,0.11283407767796133,0.0,0.0,0.08142146698507592,0.0,0.0,0.09729661837582468,0.07146400909433286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011224123039209,0.14457466236717234,0.0,0.09830788352227572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706102132025012,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KetchupCowgirl,2020/02/03,"Avoiding intrusive thoughts in the future Every once in a while, I go through a kind of rough period with my mental health. I've never been diagnosed with anything but the best way I can describe it is being slightly manic-depressive. Like I go through periods where I have a ton of energy and take on a lot of tasks (jobs, assignments at school when I was a student, etc.), don't sleep or eat much, and workout a lot. I inevitably crash and become depressed, unable to do keep the commitments I made while manic, sleeping and eating a lot, etc. 

When my depression has gotten bad in the past, I've had kind of intense thoughts that I should kill myself. When I was going through a hard time, it got to where I was thinking it all the time and it was really frustrating because I didn't actually want to commit suicide I was just thinking about it all the time, almost like someone else was in my head telling me to do it.

I've been better about not swinging too far to either side, so even when I'm feeling kind of manic I try not to do too much even though it feels like I can. This makes it easier to not go into a deeper depression. So I've been better about self-care and all that and haven't had suicidal thoughts. 

But, the reason I'm looking for advice is that the suicidal deaths of celebrities Anthony Bourdain and Kate Spade got me really thinking about how you're never fully out of the woods. Like there are things I can't control and maybe events in my life could cause me to become really depressed and those thoughts could be a part of my life again. I guess I thought I could get to the point where my life is good so I wouldn't have to worry, but seeing that successful and well-liked people still losing mental-health battles made me kind of worried.

My life also hasn't been that stressful lately, I'm out of school and haven't fully transitioned to a career-type job. So I don't have a lot of work or responsibilities and in the past that has been a big part of what causes my problems. So while things are fine now, I want to prepare for when my mental health is tested.

So I'm wondering what other people have done to take care of themselves when things do get stressful to avoid having thoughts that make it hard to live your life. I also just feel like I don't open up about this kind of thing often and wanted a forum to talk about it.

Thank you!",7.134716349541932,6.055739993657505,7.014643234672308,79.8737477977449,64.49682875264271,9.828365045806908,31.75907329105004,8.72156446121922,2.3316286821705416,1879,57,375,23,24,598,210,473,0.132,0.713,0.155,0.8747,2,2,0,0,0,3,42.0,0,2,0,7,36,32,3,4,25,0,48,13,3,9,7,79,89,38,5,9,11,0,6,5,0,2,8,0,0,0,27,20,2,4,14,1,0,4,14,14,0,0,26,8,39,18,55,56,16,49,0,5,2,0,4,20,0,10,29,267,66,9,0.0,0.0,0.058722359089570464,0.0,0.0,0.058802553325387225,0.0,0.0,0.0602568159336124,0.0,0.0,0.09624424395015324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495190996695293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0502438163553859,0.0366822710460903,0.13291766154627266,0.0,0.0,0.06315020748954832,0.1064402288660512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061352673116178584,0.12363310604147175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749165447817672,0.14413511075124066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591442532721357,0.061076607363215574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06158016840401932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314859754309397,0.050268695980910674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422261037218625,0.07949036407036504,0.0,0.0507002395543281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127923635616413,0.08597841462003793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287816411971016,0.0,0.13679591471263133,0.05047214081425985,0.09625528165814737,0.0,0.06628981698312016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781040044277064,0.0,0.06175716229986585,0.19189041569463275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942929165771712,0.0534865229630378,0.06657499328844367,0.3133162901401199,0.0,0.0,0.06788029781725476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125177769621677,0.1469929265735145,0.0,0.05313584411602966,0.0,0.050532050581058564,0.06732070732815587,0.0,0.2046353668776981,0.0,0.11387854427570855,0.08033488709481658,0.0,0.060454122068587024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18192748186766952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847145838672095,0.0,0.09282171781837747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408467240271308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032785338385244,0.11488816133746467,0.08343587672769112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056885057225051675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575795829667976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564940916187848,0.06187017440484464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12180112181823735,0.047951879638036515,0.0,0.06277590464567552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043740640858447,0.0,0.05098629011896134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048056028677429315,0.0,0.13786108050191329,0.0,0.0,0.19746585476466247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048859122070364,0.04836658282399519,0.05259581677747505,0.055401281129915866,0.0,0.0,0.15991103664000303,0.115673602373695,0.05912187304151385,0.28663453906259256,0.10526600846082798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04085504159378416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647875640362704,0.04776430884104185,0.0,0.0,0.05410477233666039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652574866907116,0.04380829530706954,0.12222176528156188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,csvio,2020/02/03,I feel alone I (f/15) recently opened up to my friends about my physically abusive father. He has beaten and destroyed my mental health for as long as I can remember. They told me to go to the authorities so I could stop living at home with my father. I got in touch with the proper autorities and tried to get help. My friends said they would help me get trough it. So long story short. The authorities didnt believe me and basically just believed everything my father told them and now I have to go back home. Ive been kind of distant and quiet lately and my best friend has been ignoring me for 2 weeks now. My other friends dont seem to care and I have no one else. My mother is a suicidal wreck and my brother is on the spectrum and cant really understand what I am going through. I tried to get help from the school I go to and they talked to my parents and believed everything my father said and now they think i am a master manipulator or idek. I know everyone has their own stuff going on but I just wish I could rely on someone. I dont even have a proper home because I have been in boarding schools and moved to new countries every few years. Its kind of hard to stay positive rn.,3.3529144736842085,4.910785462500005,4.577982456140352,84.73894736842107,73.54166666666666,7.719298245614036,26.38157894736842,8.371475516178862,1.6943749999999995,941,33,192,16,19,310,131,240,0.091,0.8059999999999999,0.10300000000000001,0.7191,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,6,3,10,11,2,0,8,0,23,1,0,1,0,33,43,19,1,4,4,7,3,0,4,1,1,3,3,0,5,16,0,2,6,0,0,6,5,3,0,1,9,6,39,8,29,31,3,28,0,0,0,0,26,9,0,2,12,132,44,3,0.0,0.11378205577046745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946004956393903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384257583771606,0.0,0.058540133049968836,0.0,0.0,0.3245850769393017,0.10077951672965776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979108856886096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334725867886587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250972591503087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022229995720477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342814057263231,0.0,0.08091098736625242,0.09176256154992968,0.17261449465436374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04855659594862993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29677592009811354,0.0,0.15051805634719265,0.0,0.27288560725655875,0.0,0.07680545443806082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602568769747533,0.0,0.0,0.10207738093844933,0.0,0.0,0.19310440282368,0.0,0.2889833691045096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20000481746050625,0.052776601086325536,0.0,0.10832812561416186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479789542927753,0.16997035565147006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677753212714713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020666738383039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274817280796352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507367647184772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663202053305423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061520471210558016,0.0,0.09481988047717042,0.0,0.10878538178821813,0.0,0.1826965877634869,0.0,0.0,0.19437874683157166,0.0,0.08742380241708222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136748685865322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235718973721583,0.0,0.08028693845117202,0.0,0.0,0.10993350902892238,0.10504327277723836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718677478096855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061533340950246575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18352512309985936,0.0,0.13039866412071807,0.0,0.0,0.0999725573251688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703096886794104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043190445485873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821828100298515,0.0,0.0,0.061841371983904984
mentalhealth,LivinLaVida_Loca,2020/02/03,"I had a decent childhood- so why so many mental problems? I had a fairly normal childhood by most people's standards, but it seems I have similar mental problems to people who had a traumatic childhood. I was in an abusive relationship, so maybe that has to do with it? After I got divorced, I was basically involved with a string of unhealthy people. I do remember my dad being a little bit overly angry at times, so I'm not sure if I've blocked out things to cope? I'm pretty sure I saw him lunge at my mom before when I was little and did things you might consider abusive on rare occasions but I was fairly well adjusted until I got involved with my ex husband. Can just a little bit of childhood trauma cause all of this or was it the abusive relationship mostly? Trying to identify the root cause.",5.693076923076923,6.425041128205134,6.832461538461541,73.86253846153849,67.2051282051282,8.804102564102564,32.266666666666666,8.841846274778883,2.8505635897435897,640,26,109,10,10,216,95,156,0.281,0.68,0.039,-0.9932,0,0,0,0,1,0,13.0,0,1,0,0,7,6,0,0,9,0,16,1,1,3,3,28,22,11,0,4,6,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,12,1,16,3,19,8,5,17,0,0,1,0,12,9,0,6,8,84,24,0,0.0,0.4342804393513083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039639011338882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667719811193967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25101952730900945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954327289546441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36736131743646505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386862670468897,0.12274354039481528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462520057134321,0.1296108297446269,0.0,0.14309260136807445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197078335881132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541071118496242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242982586952175,0.0,0.23381439101153184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623454376996137,0.1384030873119139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122564410930244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23030135770788698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16233836596891102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07124257822625482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295038082778186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985208421888476,0.0,0.1102460284684162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soumyav3003,2020/02/03,"I LOOOOOOONNNNNNGGGGGGG FOR DEATH I wish I could go away from this cruel place filled with filthy creatures....probably the other side is more beautiful... oh, how I wish I could go...
Unfortunately, I don't have the balls to kill myself....oh, how unfortunate",3.4626666666666672,6.648223155555558,3.068333333333332,86.4225,84.1111111111111,6.555555555555558,20.833333333333336,7.793537801064563,1.1396666666666673,202,6,37,4,6,60,34,45,0.359,0.541,0.10099999999999999,-0.9416,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,2,0,5,0,0,2,0,7,9,2,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,5,7,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675687932439356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4547619461639066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237044885060346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315077013739774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975440609619226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6549869651553079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,greengod210,2020/02/03,"I haven’t gotten a full night’s sleep in ages because my mind won’t stop racing. What do I do? Title says it all.  I have a ton of stuff going on in my life right now, none of it bad, but all this activity just causes me to lie in bed with my thoughts racing every night, and it takes me at least 2 hours to fall asleep, sometimes more.  I can’t relax to go to sleep, and I just want the morning to come so I can get things done.  Any time one little thought pops into my head, I will agonize over it and the worst case scenarios.  The worst case scenarios never end up happening, but I will still agonize over them when I am laying in bed, even though nothing can be done in that moment.  This is really going to become an issue once I start working full time and have to wake up early every day, as I am in my last semester of university.  Right now, I wake up at 6am one day a week for a full work day, and doing that is not fun when your thoughts have kept you awake until after midnight, even though you shut the lights at 10:30pm.  Last year, I had the same issues during a stressful period, and I wrote down my thoughts in a journal, which helped slightly but not a lot.

Besides getting therapy, which I think I may need to look into, does anyone here have any suggestions as to how I can “put off” my thoughts and just get a good night’s sleep for once (8 hours)?  Rationalizing in my head doesn’t work, because I will be too “excited” to see the scenario play out that I just stay awake.  With meditation, I am willing to try it but I am afraid I won’t be able to let go of the thoughts during the exercise, or they’ll just come right back once I’m done.  Getting up and reading a low key book helps sometimes but not always, and I’d rather not rely on a sleeping pill, Melatonin or NyQuil.  Because I can be exhausted, but tossing and turning for easily an hour on a good night.  I hate it.",7.1258383319051735,4.989145938303345,7.398744644387317,80.50897672093689,65.19537275064268,10.495344187375037,32.92216509568695,8.841846274778883,2.402413767495002,1466,44,321,18,18,480,197,389,0.10400000000000001,0.813,0.083,-0.9036,0,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,3,2,3,20,14,1,2,21,0,37,13,9,2,3,56,67,27,0,3,18,0,0,0,0,8,4,1,2,0,16,17,0,2,7,5,0,8,11,8,0,2,13,4,39,6,50,41,13,75,0,1,2,0,10,34,0,4,32,220,55,5,0.07526942308598783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263018971530787,0.0,0.0,0.1023715775939399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05263013072298015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05787754024891401,0.06284682427089715,0.13765062506307396,0.08312916418023776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732243142613772,0.0,0.12967588635676108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14562765301935882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586877937423917,0.2310802584074486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666636770578736,0.0,0.0,0.09942948813091804,0.0,0.1268354705870859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730066772622664,0.0,0.17110939089721033,0.12626484190187276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656050225385192,0.0,0.0,0.07431297222061982,0.15449628663061907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090301536638746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22237565960707728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15712344418343913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227092517823095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769680847648602,0.053165019506928285,0.0,0.07543973591910852,0.0,0.0,0.06320735830361432,0.0,0.0,0.06399137184766546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760006604162796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05581132348286312,0.05805241929665881,0.0,0.0,0.2825410187025764,0.0,0.07222304147857188,0.0,0.0,0.2404784371750609,0.10200901814209157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566655975557306,0.0,0.0,0.07528979206084545,0.0,0.04821951981261434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19283902815087905,0.0,0.059857266331406325,0.0,0.0,0.05997998503447372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30129512705264705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888676813241342,0.0,0.05327608506985669,0.0802271900942489,0.060110258505947374,0.06292860804154628,0.0862208698361644,0.0,0.0861654813817584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05659323876538089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607714509409453,0.0,0.05000566013738903,0.048229607067404236,0.14790365203649647,0.358533085524769,0.08778041180421152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051102997460691725,0.08187151815861324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044395855899622416,0.0,0.060376591017968426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643911093833044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04847104066240316
mentalhealth,seasoned-fryqueen,2020/02/03,"Anxiety of contamination has taken over my life. As long as I can remember I’ve been very anxious about germs and the cleanliness of certain things. My family always wrote my stress off and called my s hypochondriac, which wasn’t quite true. While I can find myself stressed thinking that I have a something seriously wrong with me, the point where I get so anxious that I can’t even complete my daily activities is when I become anxious about the contamination of things. If I see what I think is blood I have to wash my hands multiple times and change my clothes and I struggle to be in the areas that I now view as unclean. This happens even if I see my own blood and I know it’s my own blood- I still can’t help but feel contaminated and as though I’m at risk for catching a blood transmitted disease. 

I finally decided that I need to get help today when I opened a package that I know was completely sealed when I first opened it (I checked because it was something that I wasn’t comfortable using unless I was sure it was untampered with) and saw that there was small bit blood on the inside of the packaging (that you couldn’t reach unless you had opened it). I know that my cuticles has been bleeding yesterday when I first opened this package and so it’s almost certainly my blood, but I still when into panic, cleaning and thinking I need to go get tested for blood diseases. 

I’m so tired of this anxiety consuming me and hope the counseling I’ve signed up for will help. Has anyone ever experienced anything like this before? Any tips on how to control these thoughts?",5.760803278688524,6.684525891803278,5.987663934426234,79.29592213114758,67.1311475409836,9.378688524590164,31.643442622950825,9.516144504307137,2.8139803278688524,1267,50,240,25,20,404,158,305,0.09699999999999999,0.799,0.105,0.7515,0,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,0,4,20,14,0,5,10,0,24,12,8,3,5,49,48,31,0,6,6,0,2,1,0,1,4,0,1,0,24,17,0,1,11,0,1,2,5,7,0,2,14,7,42,7,31,31,3,35,0,0,4,0,7,16,0,4,18,168,66,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941578121679643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091944920128307,0.0,0.0,0.0743057580618545,0.0,0.16717892684904925,0.3703240735245162,0.0,0.07640249085107469,0.0,0.0899179767723438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660855342466528,0.1206775495042598,0.09297873361224103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929198835933733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115745011915867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559069950521587,0.0,0.2291301323474408,0.0,0.12255297572443592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443405222995682,0.09883885723977366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300782848331064,0.0,0.05524901374247771,0.0,0.0,0.1196973842967604,0.099868664799685,0.1858860373423075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17126353281467466,0.0,0.06209933118619858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966250338852455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21971943454655368,0.0,0.0,0.10852744452037212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801519506300114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077178982090229,0.05338266101582275,0.0,0.0,0.09669844365878433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204117577553173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12820205997010492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329326034582696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621961005160045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377896217758926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741443616001905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16823917124528626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17452259428081193,0.0,0.2503314785024056,0.11423028634202732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298347962761856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145185160616773,0.21004292002124972,0.10735492451118776,0.08674631942551582,0.0637148532375437,0.12558710515908364,0.1035729685734838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437217828587682,0.0,0.09015726574289876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946703680597795,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,depressedzoomer,2020/02/03,"Can it be considered self harm if it isn’t physical? In the past I’ve had issues with self harm (cutting mostly) because I’ve lived most of my life feeling numb. It has been about 4 years since I have last cut because of the help of my therapist in girlfriend and I’m so thankful for that. 

But since then I do other stuff that could be “harmful” like drink way too much caffeine when I know I’m sensitive to it so I can feel something or purposefully read depressing books because I know they’ll make me depressed. Do you guys think I’ve just gone into another form of self harm?",4.440705128205128,5.343752162393162,4.939391025641027,85.69831730769235,70.1111111111111,8.243162393162393,30.009615384615394,8.472884824447931,2.0682487179487183,461,18,95,7,8,147,83,117,0.16899999999999998,0.74,0.091,-0.8695,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,0,6,11,2,0,2,0,13,3,0,1,0,16,23,8,0,2,4,0,2,1,1,1,2,0,0,4,8,3,1,0,5,3,0,1,1,9,0,0,3,2,10,2,11,16,4,10,0,2,0,0,8,3,0,4,6,57,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17256441241125947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009582749903725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13139454946546414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834852013041242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16121446986792834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664215481440779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16294868008418747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030679095020472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17176674897162975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808850782674469,0.13414528530052444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11623959247045153,0.08039985230970134,0.0,0.14531699309842355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098507460239853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12097677680359048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709924652472426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16461302614959494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5150424833125558,0.0,0.0,0.2722655136753465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669286490625026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18839155019082887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15151255657141452,0.0,0.1910767028381172,0.0,0.10544884441911093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062680858232092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597671298666958
mentalhealth,trapgoddesss,2020/02/03,"Need advice on seeing a doctor for anxiety I’ve been battling anxiety/ocd/hypochondria for a long time and I’ve finally had enough. I am a college student and would like to see a doctor for my issues. My dad has anxiety though it’s different than mine and he takes xanax as needed and my mom takes a low dose of prozac. Neither of them have gotten their prescriptions from a psychiatrist but rather a general practitioner. I’m unaware of how I should go about making an appointment because the school clinic can only refer me to a psychiatrist. We also don’t have insurance so everything is coming out of pocket here. I’m just really nervous about the whole thing. 

Sorry if this post is confusing. Should I look up a local psychiatrist or try and make an appt with our ‘family’ doctor ?",4.756319910514538,6.756366953020137,6.041761744966447,73.86161353467566,70.74496644295301,9.530425055928413,27.852908277404925,9.928628108626363,3.0626102908277404,632,23,107,17,12,212,108,149,0.109,0.878,0.013000000000000001,-0.8458,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,2,0,2,0,9,5,1,2,13,0,13,7,0,3,0,25,27,13,0,7,5,2,0,1,0,3,7,0,0,0,3,9,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,3,3,12,1,18,21,3,11,0,1,3,0,7,5,0,3,4,77,15,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15266824656941708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493879207049174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390343307284647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952376671434926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458016150370095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16322934202880718,0.0,0.4797306698813529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16142957205956018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041138044563453,0.0,0.14728176454639488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17114468123819446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879032990911123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16306577181242052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632713577557138,0.0,0.0,0.13826053437543712,0.13119565599605704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20857234350438766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18297720315814545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23168831581824464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188215884159787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496272109420321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008631436933607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811527430859068,0.248993588544943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17488909843571573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349342634792908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379369683079273,0.0,0.15349729188121392,0.0,0.09110022170946376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060713729407184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17442761353529385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098283520670957,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shelbicycle253,2020/02/03,"How do you stay entertained / happy during the long winter? I live in Washington. Winters here are not just long, but intensely grey. Some days we only get 8 hours of daylight, but even then it’s still dark and muggy out. It’s rained for over a month straight and has been so cold.. I’m feel like I’m running out of engaging things to do while waiting out the season. What are some things you do to stay happy and fight boredom during the winter months?",3.8200642054574665,5.457576303370789,4.0854253611557,88.41764044943821,72.48314606741573,6.8834670947030485,23.950240770465488,7.447530270364453,0.9691431781701448,357,10,71,4,7,111,64,89,0.064,0.7340000000000001,0.20199999999999999,0.9136,0,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,1,2,0,0,6,6,1,0,4,0,7,0,0,1,0,16,12,9,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,3,4,5,10,11,2,22,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,2,14,46,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870230169306527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420516492642542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874581021750787,0.15364598892880835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123651529386216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4578918435182341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21180054191984407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507229596514928,0.0,0.1899106735767066,0.3806602105681301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3433335055825788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16357036037357328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45847182291512295,0.1717551104603409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28576578753823656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,boop_attack,2020/02/03,"Taking the medication, going to therapy, making positive life changes... So why do I still feel deeply sad all the time? Hey everyone,

I hope this is okay to post here. I've had diagnosed depression, anxiety and PTSD for about half my life now. In the past few years I've built up a good support system (therapist, psychiatrist), found medication that works, and have made positive changes to my life (a good job, made more friends, developed some goals, etc.). For a short period I would have described myself as feeling content.

But now those deep-seated feelings of sadness have come back, and I don't know why. My life is not where I'd like it to be and I'm still around some of the stressors that caused my earlier depression (can't do anything about them but abide for now), but I've learned good coping and relationship skills and I think I've managed well. So why can't I figure out or explain why I'm feeling so sad again? It's so constant and persistent. I don't want to get bad again. What should I do?",4.722397959183674,5.995212974489796,5.161836734693877,82.99030612244898,69.76530612244898,9.06938775510204,30.3265306122449,9.424239791934726,2.6089632653061225,797,32,159,17,14,254,118,196,0.121,0.75,0.129,-0.3752,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,1,4,18,15,0,0,7,1,16,7,0,4,1,36,36,16,0,4,5,0,4,1,1,2,7,0,0,0,7,10,0,0,10,0,0,2,5,6,1,1,4,4,14,9,17,29,6,23,0,5,0,0,5,6,0,4,14,95,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767710511030047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943150916131052,0.102028093381803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812878831922556,0.09569540185857132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773707317511285,0.2424864927968548,0.098727232443654,0.0,0.12385378008458466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974285813068664,0.1163277575182555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12782156661051425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951572681099728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23180307118556925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566505128669875,0.08854817814742079,0.0,0.059879519710487265,0.0,0.06513607534528396,0.28839081990028304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383458836479647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373373768058367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298721100367362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238125690872978,0.05599314781076368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168954081921538,0.0765037357973042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309170596685973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094091727648245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097656613687703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339741315856379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304932738389322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183056993262044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005921025644324,0.0,0.0,0.08617321223403626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13106767264980754,0.13307221043137518,0.0,0.07343810420558512,0.0,0.0,0.06683059868472002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760054020958638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304905771092404,0.0,0.4136744215942317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343817664040949,0.0,0.0,0.08141636959179341,0.0,0.0,0.0738057295416879
mentalhealth,cbrjma234,2020/02/03,"Advice Growing up I dealt with a ton of anxiety and other mental health issues , so from an early age I knew something was wrong. I had trouble talking about my feelings or emotions out of fear of being judged by others or being told “it’s all in your head”. So like a lot of us I never sought out help or managed to figure out what was going on and I allowed it to get worse and worse. When my sister passed away everything that I had allowed to build up inside me just exploded into this cycle of depression , anxiety and drug abuse. I have never been the same since her death and I don’t think I have managed to cope with her loss in a healthy manner. It is a constant thought in my head every single day and if you add on top other everyday struggles that stem from preexisting mental health issues and drug abuse I’m just a complete wreck. This has affected me in everything from school and work to family and relationships. I know I need to kick the substance abuse and get it under control and I know I probably need to talk to a professional. Talking about it in person with others is really hard and I have to get over my social anxiety at some point. As I get older I know I must meet my obligations and responsibilities and be there for my family who have also suffered from the loss. Just wish I could cope in a healthier manner.",5.317433155080213,5.991535787878789,6.289197860962568,77.63173796791446,68.01515151515152,9.090552584670233,28.786987522281642,9.168548406835145,2.3687524955436725,1064,35,199,19,17,354,146,264,0.21100000000000002,0.747,0.042,-0.9926,2,0,3,0,3,0,13.0,1,2,0,5,10,9,0,2,11,0,18,6,2,4,4,52,35,23,1,6,7,1,2,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,15,22,0,1,8,0,0,3,3,8,0,0,8,2,31,1,44,22,6,32,0,4,0,0,16,20,0,6,10,153,46,5,0.0,0.35915861699774343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987381381502308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080412259251299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318930619215262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493330921994028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594175747303476,0.10919168410893584,0.11332841733892468,0.08067468543927155,0.0,0.0,0.06516443398419051,0.0,0.0870282653844404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23435581075768736,0.0,0.0,0.11365987625759025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513316130447263,0.0,0.18162202804892824,0.0,0.19050886535438685,0.11370156793688488,0.05109042232520069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111633765673369,0.0,0.05742511660395674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051476178292203,0.0,0.20739872260947348,0.2148081594316505,0.0,0.0,0.06772705335134364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21092546834836248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16659191932904213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04936454990588399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085903221809885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20365533832715613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14984434189236848,0.1558613202827675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08822692880203999,0.0,0.0,0.09551838009296086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894154091422344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473079083051836,0.0,0.0,0.10848246437325644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226100154523364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358388822473017,0.0,0.0,0.10300070563097552,0.0,0.0777879072251649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563217650808067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436438249698455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474433215117846,0.0,0.08021692686251397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655100263181468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154239620063888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11619456690794112,0.0,0.0,0.07356057296049491,0.0,0.20594308219003535,0.0,0.110474756939688,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadazz,2020/02/03,"Getting into a psychiatrist Im almost 22 years old and I am finally to the point where I am ready to see a psychiatrist after 10 years of mental health problems. I cannot cope with my bipolar depression on my own anymore and have tried everything besides meds to this point

I dont have a primary care physician but is it possible to get into a psychiatrist without a referral?? or should i attempt to go to the mental health services at the nearest hospital? i dont wanna drive up the medical bills on my parents insurance and i think we have pretty good coverage but i dont know what to do",6.048937728937732,6.300206811965816,7.569597069597068,70.5623076923077,66.35042735042735,11.130158730158731,37.227106227106226,10.914260884657429,4.3545003663003685,475,24,85,13,7,165,75,117,0.055,0.85,0.095,0.7526,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,9,0,12,5,0,0,0,17,19,6,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,0,1,2,5,2,0,0,0,1,12,2,18,18,1,17,0,1,1,0,2,10,0,2,5,62,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14799658027191148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465741511278847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068811172728894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272966806731003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.519648260218336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282972609884305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190355126481454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544348654888381,0.0,0.08399600633952628,0.1239644698077398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142009731706783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964529580583814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122494557321698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16416829885468048,0.14888915785154533,0.2978876857522569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508728667304625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641102285081334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27943042815787,0.1666180482166525,0.0,0.1503619047425854,0.0,0.1414210366169605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777446408483434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947018596640354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034394199335646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14247029645883666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19035185935333854
mentalhealth,Pretend_Orchid,2020/02/03,"Am I going insane? I’m finding reality really fake and scary. I take LSD every now and again. The first 5 times was amazing and helped me deal with a lot going on in my life. I had one experience that has completely destroyed my concept of reality. Me and my close friend chose to drop some acid, not much half a tab. 

My state of mind was kind of in a bad way but not so much that I would notice if that makes sense. We took the acid and waited to be sailed away to this alternative reality we’ve been some many times before. This was different though about an hour in we experienced really intense telepathy. I had no control of my mind, it was like my friend was peeling back every layer of my memories but I could only focus on my negative ones. He saw my regrets, pain and biggest secrets, he saw how it shapes my personality and haunts me and so did I. I saw how these events in my life have become me I’m just a walking talking manifestation of these horrific memories. My mind felt like my friend was pulling out all of this hate from within me. My mind could only focus on negative, asking questions and giving answers that I don’t believe in, or at least I don’t think I do? I just don’t know who I am anymore. 

After a few hours my friend decided to go to a different room and leave me on my own. Which I was happy with. So I lay in bed closing my eyes and seeing all this mechanical machinery working away and as though it was trying to speak to me, the images of snakes and humanoid lizards. I also accessed my memory to another time I was tripping with some other close friends, it was very different this time I had forgotten a lot. I had already had the same telepathic experience with my other friends, I was told I’d be able to have this level of communication with many others if I deal with my problems so my mind isn’t so fucked. I could do that or forget. I chose to forget about everything last time. I distanced my self from those friends without knowing the reason. I repeated over and over to myself this time NOT to forget and that I would deal with my problems head on. 

Towards the end of the trip I realised something. Either me or my friend had to die that night. I was given a choice in my brain either my friend would murder me or my friend would committee suicide. If I wanted him to kill me all I had to do was ask for his help. This was the hardest choice I’ve ever made not because it was a hard choice but more so because it was so easy to choose for me to live. The next day was awkward as you’d imagine, I didn’t have any personality I was just a thing that was there. We’ve never spoken about this telepathic experience. 

I met up with him a few months later I was really nervous but glad to see him. We went to the pub had a really interesting fun conversations. But we somehow got round to taking acid again, it always seems to happen when we’re around wether we want to or not we take acid I don’t even remember taking it. The telepathy happened again straight away but instantly said to my friend I need to be on my own I’m sorry I don’t want my negative trip to effect yours. So I went to bed and had the similar kinds of visions and memories as last time with the same ending my friend dying and me living. 

The next day was awkward but fine and we went to the pub again and met these two middle aged women had a really good time and went back to ours and took acid with them. I know, but it’s like I’m not in control of it. It’s like the acid comes to me instead of me going to the acid but more likely I’m just really stupid. 

So this night was hellish haha. We went back to theirs did some Mandy and listened to music then the telepathy happened again, but it was more feelings based, I could see the energy coming of these woman I could see it all dance around my environment. It’s hard to explain how I got to this point because there is no words for it but I had this realisation at that point that everything in reality isn’t real and that I effect everything I am everything. It’s all just my imagination. Nothing is real. Everything I interact with is a lesson about myself acid just makes it obvious and these beings I’ve created become aware of it and all want to help me be better because they’re just as tired as me. I’m stuck in limbo.

I was laying on the couch whilst these two woman were laughing at me, my friend came over to me and said do you want to leave and at that point the women wanted me to stay it was like there was two devils on my shoulder my friend being an angel on the other. It was like choosing good from bad but I understood that these women weren’t evil I just saw them that way as I didn’t want to stay. It was my version of good and bad. I just need to do thing I actually want to do not what I think I want to do, not what I think these imaginary beings around me would like. They just want me to be happy. The just provide choices. 

We left the women and went back home. We stayed up and talked most of the night it really was like I was in the company of a higher spirit trying to teach me things about myself, but at the same time I had these deep unsettling feelings that he really wanted to hurt me. I was given the choice again that night I chose myself again but I didn’t sleep. I left the next morning that was a few months ago now we haven’t met up since we’ve exchanged a few texts on my b day him saying how much he appreciates me as a friend and I said the same back. I have a problem with believing it though I do truly love him and want him in my life but I just think deep down he wants to kill me or at least wants me to die but I chose me over him before I fell asleep those nights, so don’t we all deep down wants others to die along as it’s not us? Or do I just feel guilty? Does any of this even matter if nothing is real? 

I’ve been having flashbacks to the telepathy and some from of PTSD in my day to day life, I have multiple triggers and I have really bad thoughts that don't feel like mine, it seems to be getting more intense. I can also see past this reality sometimes where objects move unnaturally and I can see how fake everything is.  I don’t know if I’m going insane or if this is actually real and me talking about it is fucking everything up. I just need some people to come up to me and tell me this telepathy stuff is real in our normal voices so I can try and fucking deal with it because I don’t know if it’s real or I’m just schizo. 

Why should I even care if it is real though? Because nothing is. I guess because I have to live it. 

Appreciate ya’ll reading.",2.929336911333266,4.306858044215184,4.350561936013127,86.67277245171783,74.30582166543846,7.302036957216947,23.929373896358506,7.902280558234669,1.1132057590967874,5174,151,1100,74,106,1719,414,1357,0.131,0.728,0.14,0.5017,4,0,1,0,0,3,87.0,15,3,4,8,71,69,11,3,52,1,120,16,6,14,10,258,227,104,8,42,60,0,8,10,15,6,6,7,5,9,88,76,0,3,33,4,1,25,32,27,0,7,82,35,184,42,161,124,38,157,4,2,12,4,90,68,3,32,67,798,272,3,0.031735679237437996,0.0,0.061938890017945676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02813176482267472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03502111119616892,0.050758022440788135,0.026406627417806174,0.0,0.0,0.04316270028853955,0.033277626765300834,0.0,0.0,0.03147326617214194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475444862811725,0.059337152170426115,0.0,0.08945014595475265,0.1220138920350898,0.10599186625221364,0.13542042852251968,0.07009912874412526,0.054009451175673226,0.07151048580412615,0.0,0.02806762931289591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03542751364825514,0.0,0.03629716256621343,0.03235664005471544,0.0,0.0,0.08201243278191304,0.03327425588388904,0.0,0.07118852560873089,0.12669178757685953,0.0,0.0,0.10233443840454716,0.13087236713919814,0.0,0.0,0.13174649852352194,0.09947109062434366,0.0,0.0,0.027772106763650408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05621678431144568,0.0,0.0,0.06288335049002561,0.02870673877218786,0.05347735701232703,0.0,0.1996538751913937,0.09313075168085344,0.0,0.0,0.06418605189166822,0.022671975588314252,0.030471228887031663,0.0,0.029005835882712758,0.026994352547185515,0.0,0.0,0.36778360582632735,0.08801737221926738,0.016580582559704998,0.030443755310976064,0.0901805892982552,0.07985514616577988,0.050763843591301316,0.0,0.034960428592151614,0.0,0.08419126902292871,0.06756644134162057,0.05685787014814817,0.03133241298900385,0.03256996264129305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06381527050034103,0.0,0.03183347384427205,0.0,0.06250650276621808,0.0,0.033973700996607466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022165408832771,0.06609565261579002,0.08720549674591499,0.05173762856639125,0.0,0.06720700408421333,0.06896181669764125,0.0,0.08966339512375539,0.15504449844335225,0.0,0.0840695585737632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396107921808126,0.02864268955543024,0.030029067031086057,0.042367624645155616,0.06434999526988591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16021994602304235,0.0,0.05066223278256427,0.03373000462350265,0.0699881273807121,0.07059481209968638,0.024476512270478524,0.0,0.10125376470733967,0.1489089256523272,0.031094227529979437,0.09135372043297192,0.03613128115448889,0.0,0.0,0.043009835154244384,0.04827282824909578,0.033769000240388404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03029529679909048,0.02200152408856985,0.05542074201583743,0.0,0.0,0.09000142427229572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911002770993854,0.03709731073930776,0.0,0.035551223797322486,0.0,0.03174426736294733,0.2528550555761421,0.18297619882211685,0.03262956382599939,0.0,0.0,0.03595033807508146,0.0,0.090563695056671,0.025237485906505385,0.0,0.0,0.15173536511997635,0.057781940938017085,0.03310723473911088,0.0,0.0,0.02625208181266905,0.0,0.03175859836544292,0.0,0.0,0.02443167634198596,0.03138739824504309,0.035525494667984124,0.0,0.10147803450187556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03632976003213157,0.034713682176585534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544512493016402,0.0765238105346666,0.0277383824602054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06325132537671654,0.08133976729914652,0.12472057487975352,0.02519458440475541,0.1665479679742986,0.03647549477642418,0.0,0.030324801514027742,0.07051901467973773,0.06463932905257118,0.0,0.09300344172128147,0.0,0.038174114611516194,0.0,0.0,0.026185259000087197,0.280777887860062,0.050380610008802035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17651575559561916,0.02863651434264968,0.0,0.0,0.03059206229453568,0.0,0.023103952454970364,0.0,0.0,0.1127205799457807,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carterhajek,2020/02/03,"How do I coup with the fact that my brother is extremely unhealthy? I myself love fitness I started body building I eat lots of food protein drinks and supplements and my brother I'll be lucky to see him eat a bag of popcorn in a day he cant even manage to drink a small glass of milk and I've seen him go to the gym once in a while but the truth is that if he's not eating anything than he's wasting his time
 (its great that he's trying tho) which is why it drives me to tears thinking about him knowing he isn't going to feel healthy in his life and this has probably led to his diagnosis of depression and suicidal thoughts and he's getting plenty of help with that",4.207801418439715,4.537317014184397,4.998014184397164,87.13333333333334,70.34751773049645,7.9687943262411345,30.56028368794326,7.793537801064563,1.8093602836879432,533,21,116,6,9,173,93,141,0.127,0.732,0.142,0.0863,0,0,2,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,7,0,8,10,1,2,2,21,19,11,1,1,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,8,7,0,4,3,0,4,3,1,0,0,2,3,14,4,18,16,1,13,0,1,2,1,16,5,0,3,4,69,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147000819293832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198422451958106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520435409148595,0.0,0.15385747237134434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3499872406666592,0.0,0.5483624961237086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179862792567985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032287621287308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160053208258046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332905588928776,0.0,0.20304399386303615,0.0,0.0,0.19694496115207025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973481481868008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817274695078516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617469839487272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186850522458945,0.16122444218786414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902397137719445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19259800304256733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234841991297434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264382864464622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19539694533140486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446165508582065,0.0,0.14181569118887652,0.10416310467948543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128097293064015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16118968304857278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,2007cat,2020/02/03,"Someone told me this got deleted? Please help me understand my mom...

My mom definitely has mental health issues that greatly affect the relationships she has with myself and my sister. The problem is that I don’t know what it is or how to deal with it. I will try my best to explain and hopefully find a way to start repairing our relationship. 

So, I’ve always known my mom to be an unpleasant person. She is rather pessimistic and takes things to extremes, starting arguments all the time. Growing up I saw this, and experienced it, but it wasn’t until a couple years ago when I entered my 20s that I really saw how manipulative her actions were. I looked back on my childhood and realized how often she would make my sister and I cry—- like 4 days out of the week at the age of 5 and on. My sister and I definitely are damaged from this and are overly emotional to the point that if someone raises their voice I think they’re mad at me, but honestly I am glad we turned out okay and ironic enough have a high level of optimism. 

Anyways, I have never not felt loved, but I so often feel loathed and disliked by my mom. She is someone I can count on and always takes care of me, but is not loving. I used to think she simply did not feel emotion and had a low level of emotional intelligence but some of her actions are very calculated and manipulative. She very much buys my love, getting me clothes or jewelry after we get into bad fights. She never acknowledges her fault or apologizes so instead she buys my forgiveness. That signals to me that she is aware of her actions and rather than comforting me when I’m balling my eyes out begging her to tell me what is wrong she gets angry. She then uses that as a reason to say that I am ungrateful and don’t appreciate her when another argument arises. She twists things in her head and creates scenarios in which she believes I did something wrong or am out to get her. I truly don’t know if she purposely does that or her mind is telling her things.

There’s been lots of time when I have said I’m done with it all. It’s so hard to tell always have to remind myself of my worth when she’s planted this idea in my head. Her actions are always emotional, and she’s said some horrible things over the years. It’s so confusing because my mom has raised my sister and I to be confident in social situations and drilled in a hard work ethic but thinks we rebel whenever we don’t agree with her. I love my mom but I don’t understand how a mom can do these things to her daughters. 

Thank you if you read for this long, it feels good just to say it all.",5.677813203300829,5.872699251937988,6.291922980745188,79.59946361590399,67.13953488372093,9.60380095023756,30.792448112027998,9.454032385205345,2.5697182545636412,2058,73,410,38,31,673,239,516,0.127,0.7020000000000001,0.171,0.9762,0,0,1,0,1,0,39.0,5,2,1,2,23,27,3,1,15,1,41,8,3,11,5,98,81,52,0,8,21,12,6,1,0,2,1,5,0,1,32,33,0,0,19,2,3,6,11,11,0,0,14,16,86,16,54,63,9,53,0,2,4,4,71,23,0,15,24,301,118,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058022147361800926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178561120529724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863555756981886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05033106218875137,0.054652416241953286,0.03990092495623447,0.0,0.0,0.07374567453188459,0.06869126742030511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673600995961082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724250110908805,0.0,0.042213234062797984,0.06748150906637902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05728034772597616,0.06698346662325698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945134740938188,0.0,0.06763279103383278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928845341482426,0.0,0.06284732379653163,0.0,0.0598249308049973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13679070768404644,0.0,0.0,0.05490077483152251,0.05235055873799695,0.0721646660680806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727013008991627,0.0,0.1343519813885448,0.06957589100587454,0.0,0.0,0.04387328763106407,0.0691570863220566,0.0,0.0650118520348429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389103239842146,0.0,0.06831829589247157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194500899385023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03197813856692611,0.0,0.0,0.057925854044820965,0.05496594132860709,0.0,0.0,0.05564772970925967,0.23630374627388595,0.0,0.04369190088190422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659635167477113,0.0,0.06609116333118041,0.5366229465323042,0.0,0.0,0.048117154706993265,0.0,0.100966278568911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057153016890561625,0.0,0.07185023042780443,0.06187638700493731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263185330272346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547298295842273,0.0,0.0419323219328755,0.06729891894793039,0.0,0.1405489276990704,0.0,0.0,0.1245259014339544,0.10410531550643064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357446576038391,0.0,0.06672340461805573,0.16638011315689574,0.050390664572452996,0.0,0.0,0.09265915376818314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984284338108749,0.0,0.17163237267504733,0.06026241826920991,0.0,0.0,0.21742786401601769,0.12582328182273328,0.0,0.0,0.07633498843370204,0.0,0.0,0.0625453153492199,0.0,0.044439831619726436,0.07119653762421199,0.0,0.1362824886000676,0.0,0.11306467443404244,0.0,0.10801490528495952,0.0,0.0519553465012616,0.052504269258871895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047652216006790725,0.0,0.0,0.046497545685794686,0.14313012444356302,0.0,0.08430209547402752
mentalhealth,prinsesspoo,2020/02/03,"Quasi (TW: mention of weight)

I’m atm stuck in quasi recovery (from anorexia), but I’m struggling to see a reason why I should try and get unstuck. I’m eating but it’s still restricted and I count calories in my head without even thinking about it sometimes. I don’t have scales but I’ve been seeing the doctor regularly who tells me I’ve been losing weight and I’m slightly underweight right now. The thing is I’m *trying to lose weight*, I just need ana‘s control..

Even if I did find a reason I wouldn’t know where to start or what to do.
Can anybody help?


Extra -
I tried intuitively eating and listening to when my body is hungry and full but that doesn’t seem to be working well..",0.9748986212489896,3.5307898029197133,2.279063260340632,92.27906528791564,88.92700729927006,4.796269261962691,20.749797242497973,6.42735559955562,0.3474317923763177,541,18,109,6,18,173,91,137,0.12,0.853,0.027000000000000003,-0.9001,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,4,9,4,0,1,4,0,13,8,2,3,0,24,28,12,0,4,8,0,3,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,6,5,5,2,6,0,1,0,4,3,1,0,4,6,10,1,12,21,2,9,0,2,2,0,5,5,0,3,4,66,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452757871388914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603149780163006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239210144850206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847027573317564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837708774898446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271503793362134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268286873740402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427741341967284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324716451741573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645504191833684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31127258262349544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315346164520807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28607080553218583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188051220476119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22171640805592085,0.1266468537359115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759022871713147,0.0,0.09846769893474634,0.0,0.11109898239880793,0.0,0.0,0.14543525007774874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12159435315877645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242312532884682,0.08914052941816601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28335384790517804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.508220929713436,0.12508285255675633,0.0,0.12553141637627874,0.0,0.0,0.13410378315439508,0.0,0.10127880233115956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brenmikeried,2020/02/03,"I need help. So I feel like there is a lot to say here. I guess a little background would help though. I have been diagnosed with several anxiety disorders, BPD, and a Bipolar Disorder. I’ve severally struggled with depression and pretty much everything that comes with those illnesses. In October 2019 it got so bad I was hospitalized. However, I was able to get on the right meds and was doing very well. A little more background though that I feel may play into my current condition. For several years, I was a heavy user of psychedelics with a very specific focus on LSD and Weed. I had several very scary and disturbing trips where I went into a full blown psychosis and thought I’d be stuck like that, but always pulled back. I know, I’m an idiot for indulging anyway. Okay, so final background piece. Within the last year I came to the realization that I am also transgender. It’s always been there, I was just in denial.  So now to the current problems. About 4 months ago, I was smoking and it triggered another psychotic episode. This time I couldn’t stop shaking and had a really intense connection with the “transgender” side of me, Maxine. However, that connection went from only when I smoke to everyday constantly. She almost acts like her own entity. I very unintentionally started referring to myself as “we.” She’s constantly pushing and prodding at my mind it fells like. I’ve also developed a really irritating twitch that gets triggered by certain things, but especially when thinking about anything related to Max. Loved ones are starting to get worried that I’ve developed some type of alter which I don’t really believe just cause the symptoms don’t match up. However, it almost feels like that sometimes. It’s starting to freak me out though and would really appreciate any advice or help. Also, yes I am seeing a psychiatrist, I just don’t see him for another two weeks. Thank you all so much.",5.2611970443349785,7.535025042857143,6.007753694581282,73.48614285714288,70.0,9.85615763546798,31.783251231527096,10.165852483727232,3.768702463054187,1535,69,253,44,29,501,203,350,0.115,0.746,0.139,0.8588,5,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,1,1,0,0,27,19,1,3,17,2,24,6,0,3,2,52,49,27,0,5,6,0,3,5,0,3,5,1,0,0,18,21,0,1,7,1,0,10,4,8,1,2,16,6,32,11,35,28,9,47,0,1,2,1,11,16,0,7,26,174,50,1,0.08214989611470988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027592771612617,0.0728209262645908,0.0,0.1645225088619478,0.0,0.0,0.19708572672898053,0.13671058891681392,0.0,0.0,0.05586474639797457,0.17228265771533216,0.06284444567359944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760236487762421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631681993017474,0.06859173185232965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925548014266426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034649183630322,0.0,0.0,0.09395759617319248,0.0,0.08439057254015926,0.0,0.07076486145390683,0.0,0.17754970682947854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075558514817766,0.08338041531470225,0.0,0.0,0.18830179616136888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383102957202117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461236741138355,0.11737580439734825,0.0,0.0899911957384657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875979032403687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06570277645876291,0.0,0.09049737223153384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16519003116059794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04514743449925872,0.06696312973406529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20067144845056928,0.16467155491801866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984090396864104,0.07414348858960912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125001521503473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294797677290812,0.0,0.06557126332303595,0.0,0.12077925186501084,0.06091310705150334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05566689566334943,0.06247869781133116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357597776942151,0.0,0.07860635599596892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21050930807757906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015556242255573,0.0,0.06532889464581204,0.0,0.0,0.13092566244103834,0.0,0.0,0.3712239982854013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124834782485263,0.0,0.1744383578795595,0.0,0.0,0.06868099158074581,0.0,0.0858809080738165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538519669661812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563258715579975,0.0,0.0,0.05457674068713218,0.0526383363628851,0.242135567504694,0.06521784128263816,0.04790226505645198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024851165730121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711290709109893,0.0,0.0,0.06589569145787401,0.0,0.07386262241303126,0.15230755344585326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342720715533987,0.0,0.116713858408449,0.0,0.0,0.10580367941546157
mentalhealth,visionarygvp,2020/02/03,"I don’t see myself as everyone who’s romantically involved with me sees me. I’ve spent years trying to fix things about myself, in some areas I succeeded and in others I just continue the toxic cycle. Yesterday night the woman whom I have been really good friends with for 7 years, and eventually turned romantic told me that she cannot do this thing with me and her anymore. I was confused because I didn’t realize until she explained in depth how inconsiderate, selfish of an asshole I am to her on occasion. She told me I’m verbally abusive and don’t even recognize it. The problem is I honestly didn’t see it, although I’ve heard this over and over again. 

I so badly do not want to be this person whom I have seen my father be to my mother and myself growing up, I vowed to be different but I don’t know what to do to change it. I’m losing a great woman because I consciously unaware and telling myself that my behavior isn’t damaging. I’m lost.",6.885210526315787,6.130428152631577,8.029473684210528,71.3363157894737,64.84210526315789,11.389473684210527,35.84210526315789,10.793553405168565,3.8754842105263134,759,32,142,18,10,261,112,190,0.142,0.758,0.1,-0.7764,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,6,12,0,1,5,0,19,0,0,1,0,22,35,13,0,2,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,15,10,0,0,4,0,1,1,8,7,0,0,10,5,30,5,22,22,1,17,0,3,4,0,20,9,0,2,7,107,45,1,0.0,0.20975132536295132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755659592031298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781246061753514,0.21583140524239855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872740198102264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849584272879618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692649126726673,0.0,0.0,0.16915952848158036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13677275857531498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484841691487226,0.0,0.19517594270566696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729093002450226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19805102642488603,0.19324890256304494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661304436792056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15457556388558186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693935782953624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11340980162459954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4232094117055027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15473181895814042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23522142146280164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383190569631607,0.0,0.12019159101877505,0.19255755074201591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441674305544074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280027311521667
mentalhealth,trash_account173638,2020/02/03,"Horrible intrusive thoughts involving homicide I keep getting these horrible thoughts of stabbing people I love. I never experienced any of these kind of violent thoughts until 3 days ago, and now I just can't get off of it. I'm horribly anxious that I'm going to act out these bad thoughts at some point. I feel like I'm resisting the urge to do it at times, even though I know that doing these actions would be horrible and I would feel awful and I would end up in prison and all of these bad things. I don't ever want to harm people I care about or anyone in general. I sit and get in these horrible anxious cycles where I will have a thought, realize how horrible it is and then just reject it and I'll just spiral down this rabbit hole. I'm feel like I'm a dangerous person and a psychopath even though I know these things I'm thinking about are horrible and wrong and vile, but I can't get my mind off of it. What is wrong with me...please help :(",5.767856806406031,5.514364005181347,6.293141780499294,81.19423928403205,66.97927461139896,10.126990108337258,32.053226566179944,9.800150414767053,2.801035233160622,755,28,156,15,11,246,104,193,0.25,0.6920000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.9835,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,13,14,3,0,4,1,14,1,0,1,3,41,40,17,0,4,5,0,3,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,18,12,0,1,12,0,0,3,4,9,0,0,5,4,15,5,23,30,2,25,0,1,0,1,4,12,0,2,11,101,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831960719549193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309764371737742,0.0,0.0,0.276093972834888,0.0,0.08544246273051669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20405753763985326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458722596983025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880647545878271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822961219804696,0.0,0.0,0.16141894799115306,0.11053350855402684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853582944091824,0.1745940580373789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553699991821428,0.0,0.06944694775474261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190557396881888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861364606099434,0.0,0.1272485955609406,0.13431173212697353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939783568551245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028689103663693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233833833568127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424528504933634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694309946068609,0.10669705657427424,0.0,0.13413479319052546,0.11551495833578225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623635242364381,0.07829842616303519,0.2401144003109571,0.4850508852500242,0.07125361899182887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720745172201633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26041414080215075,0.26720484440008163,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ddotkdot,2020/02/03,"I contradict myself ALL the fucking time I (along with a few other close people) have discovered that I'm one of the most hypocritical people there are. This has been going on for a while now - I say one thing and do the other. And this happens ALL the time. Literally, it's to the point where I don't even know myself anymore.",3.692615384615386,5.171277646153847,5.092307692307696,81.70769230769233,72.53846153846153,7.661538461538463,23.76923076923077,8.238735603445708,1.3204461538461536,257,7,51,4,5,86,47,65,0.094,0.9059999999999999,0.0,-0.6801,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,7,0,6,1,0,0,2,9,11,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,1,1,6,0,6,10,4,9,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,1,4,45,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022202324527254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20127792159178973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28172725540562804,0.0,0.0,0.17319078681809166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694806099398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16747715571403746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129994741243125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4225367451851784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28807783740311266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24234151026681824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20245574083669265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3553927346213316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wow_bees,2020/02/03,"I feel so unbelievably alone and dont feel any reason for anything So like i dont know where to start on this but like nothing feels like anything has meaning to me.  Like nothing feels real.  All my ""friends"" dislike me.  My parents constantly yell at me but I feel like I shouldnt be feeling like this cause I'm still in middle school and that my family has money but kids constantly end up hating me for my personality of just wanting to be loved like I just want to be loved idk if this belongs on this subreddit or if there's a different one I should post to but like I just want to feel like I have meaning",2.526618181818179,4.409337240000003,3.7570181818181823,88.3665090909091,76.6,6.785454545454545,25.763636363636365,7.686295010490155,1.30796,485,18,102,7,11,158,68,125,0.085,0.619,0.29600000000000004,0.987,2,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,8,13,1,0,1,0,10,2,0,2,1,31,28,11,0,7,10,1,7,9,1,2,0,1,0,2,5,2,0,0,11,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,8,16,12,14,23,1,13,0,0,0,2,6,7,0,3,14,65,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137956374740081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471763451792739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808327833618172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11287017953853755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374680806593818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479424819246435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25754145720784544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731516137490193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035788003763388,0.0,0.3888868113013581,0.31397412571183764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488786493311955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847716971492394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06038351067248345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4831070476192376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19832994650534688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393685413724685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21085285364552164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445301434452656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200133425330525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593715682684398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522828172764746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505990789171367,0.0,0.11296808624727026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119767939024497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776891098787178,0.0,0.08774498608667303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944184165087004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meggophone123,2020/02/03,"Turning 18 and losing access to treatment I'm a journalist who writes frequently about mental health and in particular, mental health among young adults. I'm hoping to speak with teens and young adults about how their mental health care changed — whether they lost access, were forced into adult units, stopped going, etc — when they turned 18. If you're open to chatting, or have any questions about what doing so would entail, reach out to me here or by email at [megan.thielking@statnews.com](mailto:megan.thielking@statnews.com). 

You can see some of my stories here: [https://www.statnews.com/2017/12/19/college-mental-health-niteo/](https://www.statnews.com/2017/12/19/college-mental-health-niteo/)

[https://www.statnews.com/2017/02/06/mental-health-college-students/](https://www.statnews.com/2017/02/06/mental-health-college-students/)

[https://www.statnews.com/2019/11/07/transgender-teens-mental-health-studies/](https://www.statnews.com/2019/11/07/transgender-teens-mental-health-studies/)",28.43444736842105,36.54498280000001,12.889671052631586,23.800822368421077,21.0,7.697368421052633,27.66447368421053,8.472884824447931,2.105868421052631,886,15,72,7,8,192,74,95,0.09699999999999999,0.83,0.073,-0.3477,0,0,0,0,0,0,113.0,0,1,3,2,8,4,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,1,0,18,14,10,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,3,2,7,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,2,6,2,15,11,2,12,0,2,1,0,13,6,0,6,5,43,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04943569749125353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411830394693837,0.0,0.07690261162244615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107513272713314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04131474909891339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6954509770761075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220342079468202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132810510509549,0.07935615049716714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.659343222348366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143603311838833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05792921170865468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06077701846164973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814450455742385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05164107392713657,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,that_one_ginger_girl,2020/02/03,"Why does no one care? I'm going through a lot right now. My part time job isn't taking care of bills, my father in law is trying to get disability, and is in the hospital with a terrible infection. I need to come up with over $1000 for the last two months of utility bills and can't seem to get help with that...it's just one thing after another right now and I'm mentally overwhelmed. Help please.",2.260378657487095,3.877297240963859,3.8198278829604138,88.7951807228916,76.59036144578313,8.11635111876076,22.70051635111876,8.841846274778883,1.3879962134251298,313,9,70,7,7,104,59,83,0.062,0.759,0.179,0.8402,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,0,4,1,0,0,0,12,15,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,1,0,2,2,3,2,0,3,0,0,3,2,15,15,2,14,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,2,6,39,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052965841717664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3992296521238049,0.0,0.0,0.16865057143337162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17133188896078708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045781081140524,0.0,0.11126855332624486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624597630136695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19428540004938186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15959008274146236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16644854694454092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973042129727974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15627291288122155,0.0,0.0,0.14517134776996046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653365970245236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21201498209357256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21491202812445506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343969153249966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17823439130819912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720519481606908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007018334729778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416321898666615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292447757006506,0.0,0.19125250964416668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17666459866849304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fuckyourself89,2020/02/03,Killing that bitch of an ex the sluts twitter : twitter .com /star\_shine0303,5.690000000000001,8.161581333333334,0.7199999999999989,97.025,110.66666666666666,1.6,37.333333333333336,3.1291,1.664633333333334,64,4,9,0,3,15,11,12,0.569,0.431,0.0,-0.9169,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Xgx9,2020/02/03,"Questions - mental health/illness ""gatekeeping"" I am aware of what it is, but I still don't get a few things, and I have no idea where else I can post/educate myself about it, so I thought of this reddit thread! Genuinely interested in people's perspectives/explanations on a few specific questions regarding MH gatekeeping:

1. Is it still ""gatekeeping"", if one is literally qualified to recognize and diagnose mental illnesses (or the likelihood of absence of them)?
2. If the answer is yes, are we saying that self-diagnosis of mental illness is always more valid than a qualified outsider's opinion?
3. Is it considered MH ""gatekeeping"" if someone literally doesn't meet the current DSM criteria for a specific disorder, and someone else simply acknowledges that fact?

Thank you in advance!",7.430808823529414,9.563845169117648,8.10811764705883,61.15452941176475,64.22058823529412,12.79294117647059,40.80588235294117,12.161744961471696,6.320537647058824,637,37,90,25,10,212,92,136,0.111,0.8140000000000001,0.075,-0.7162,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,1,1,1,5,2,0,0,7,1,12,3,0,0,1,17,15,9,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,9,4,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,9,2,12,14,3,8,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,7,3,66,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358099935557994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17514142031606514,0.0,0.0,0.1977649301895067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28829796518251305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015375481894557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341970519054027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19479551296869185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5216897097663432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692888712855945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962909030376928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16526162150973936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3866059955609061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722401540891108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800142734825708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924134674009408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275608010355322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886702754657125,0.0,0.0,0.11463900538380338,0.0,0.0,0.1369907466768744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gepeto1485,2020/02/03,"I am having a war inside me. I have never engaged in a relationship, nor have I fallen in love (I guess). Everytime I think about the subject, my heart beat rate rockets, I run short of breath and feel really dizzy.

This way, I think it is rather reasonable to think of me as philophobic, even though I got no love related traumas at all. Still, I am heterosexual and do find girls attractive, leading to near-constant philophobic crisis. Every damn thing makes me have a crisis (I have been having these since I watched the third season of Stranger Things, which pictures love with ease enough to almost persuade me). I wish my phobia to win, so that I can free myself from this hell. Any advice?",5.61045299145299,6.89144966923077,5.655641025641028,80.24158119658122,67.69230769230771,8.547008547008549,28.290598290598286,8.841846274778883,2.1601880341880344,547,18,100,9,9,172,92,130,0.20600000000000002,0.605,0.18899999999999997,-0.4293,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,6,11,3,0,5,0,12,5,2,3,2,17,23,6,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,6,0,1,3,3,4,0,1,2,2,20,8,14,21,2,11,1,0,1,3,5,4,2,2,3,72,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17938519455911,0.0,0.0,0.18382162063525254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248357843590873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18967975228778866,0.0,0.12124808888341768,0.0,0.1546679833156163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281991255464846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16778219384809134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14681992065924454,0.0,0.2022261116962559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21753462639146148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4970447992692474,0.0,0.12253625511501465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158264368234216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760142255700864,0.18874339030151352,0.0,0.1970884639149218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518532993642951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466014580410579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439151941335109,0.3528780723574431,0.1803593228267545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14571152696412756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211099635682606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_make_me_anxious,2020/02/03,"Anxiety Lately my anxiety been getting so much worse. Ina. Nutshell here the story 
2015- my mom got really sick she refused to have an ambulance called until she couldn’t stand it despite me and my sister pleading with her to just go to the hospital
2015-2016- she was in and out of hospitals, my older sister and I were taking care of her. But it was mostly me since she was never home
During that time I was taken by cps because my sister was neglecting me and my mom had finally gone into a hospital
I spent a lot of time in a detention center just cause they had no where to put me 
I was living with a “friend” but her parents mainly her mom was mentally and emotionally abusive doing things like making jokes about a stealing problem I really struggled with, calling me a kleptomaniac, and a pyromaniac when I showed interest in a fire (I’d never been near fire my whole life so it was a brand new experience) and she would use my mom being a teacher as a way to guilt me when I couldn’t bring myself to go back to school and I’d hide out for a few weeks. Shed also come into the basement where I slept at outrageous times just to “talk to me” which would always end in her yelling at me. 
She’d make comments of how she didn’t want me near her son cause she thought I’d try to have sex with him (I was 15 he was 11-12) and she just was way too open about her sex life with me.
2017-my mom passed away and I was officially put into foster care where I went from home to home to home until I finally landed with my current foster mom . During that time I began to blame myself for her death due to me getting easily frustrated and walking out on my mom when she needed help. 
I’m completely aware I couldn’t have stopped her death and I was only a child but I still feel so horrible for how I treated her and how I didn’t help her when she needed it the most and I still blame myself for her dying in so much pain. 
I recently learned that my anxiety took its worst turn after I left the “friends” house and now it affects almost every aspect of my life and I hate it so much",3.3365316901408453,4.5851184835680785,4.725818661971832,84.89182658450704,73.08450704225352,7.766314553990611,24.814847417840376,8.278499904357787,1.4215072769953048,1638,49,339,26,32,546,201,426,0.20199999999999999,0.726,0.07200000000000001,-0.9961,3,0,0,0,1,0,21.0,0,0,1,0,28,18,3,2,19,0,31,8,1,9,2,67,59,35,3,9,7,12,3,1,2,2,5,1,4,1,12,30,0,3,3,2,1,11,8,10,0,0,29,4,73,8,54,23,10,67,0,1,0,2,48,24,0,4,30,246,85,2,0.0,0.08679114765751833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335087919681729,0.0,0.0,0.058579264453290876,0.0609511851109529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16811178147045547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882227351524006,0.05632594577014278,0.0,0.044653485095049114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959611250470847,0.0,0.14936974164399214,0.1504991076190712,0.0,0.06309975260881248,0.07680289109697395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602357821177412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239817147199135,0.06487916030880449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06171761798526665,0.0,0.0,0.07165410404251052,0.0,0.0,0.037038201324341234,0.0,0.0,0.1604870573163514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318798262175843,0.0,0.07654185753100433,0.0,0.08326112539500391,0.0,0.058585982577814576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232077288210771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981979840042989,0.0,0.2939092412382133,0.0,0.0,0.08452249182647922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263097622886524,0.0,0.07958805925158045,0.0,0.1552192781208604,0.03578702336930505,0.0,0.06468248981276943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06227587635803643,0.0,0.0,0.09779200090947428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382036669931176,0.0,0.0,0.6005395807471761,0.0,0.0,0.16154502580190286,0.10863024124162324,0.1129922732398963,0.07074683531276399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05571112970783745,0.07794484892363902,0.0,0.08133721417174405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009187208056132,0.0,0.14727614625901958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385367955676392,0.0,0.07232710106735776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413451270284163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059446641159921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169976175999907,0.06124160336971497,0.0,0.07657845916659826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055076074137677226,0.05887684768797645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048665096840421015,0.0,0.0,0.058153574614086524,0.17085434846404315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138520397891437,0.04973301649108482,0.07967668757325665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632658486006881,0.0,0.0,0.043205681531500915,0.11628739399634905,0.058758001408465,0.0,0.0,0.06790495130939199,0.0,0.08178277644524835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464962112622274,0.1040716457332442,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cherriesinmygarden,2020/02/03,"Tips to How to stay motivated? Hi!

I need tips/ advice to how to stay motivated to continue life.

Right now I’m not suicidal however I’m starting to relapse to my eating disorder. My antidepressant have made me gain a lot of weight which is a real struggle and I can’t motivate myself to work out, I have zero energy, which makes me starve myself again because that’s the only way I know how to loose weight. 

I’m staring to slip in school as well, I have always had good grades with little effort but now the school demands more of me and I’m still a high achiever but can’t focus on studies at all. 

I feel like such a disaster inside and out and I don’t see the light in the tunnel...",0.788760951188987,3.192214659574472,3.210663329161452,86.81647058823532,86.80141843971631,6.154526491447643,20.350855235711308,7.510576382923642,0.9200034209428454,541,17,109,10,17,186,89,141,0.091,0.773,0.135,0.4831,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,7,9,4,0,1,8,0,8,4,0,8,1,24,19,10,1,1,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,7,3,0,5,0,0,0,4,1,1,1,2,6,14,3,20,17,3,18,0,0,2,0,1,9,0,1,7,73,17,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16557634046367414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098895932742087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103290007937223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941947181313792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17338102651416662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567474858072917,0.121049090954254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14211954921665576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902432093881376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312065519996487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11968159136953373,0.08278059192909315,0.16982496632244598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144053162919467,0.0,0.16032970978457206,0.11310356323404246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563877663956136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886794877186866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19286160132836602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447021743576081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.342967828343041,0.135022993047358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199316148519081,0.3612043358823385,0.13531625610874315,0.0,0.0,0.1771371179271118,0.0,0.18534157531981565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134494830843714,0.0,0.4126683671326753,0.15234831990291753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335548047987348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imogenchampagne,2020/02/03,"Mental toughness is overrated: a World Cup-winning coach debunks sport’s most sacred trait Paddy Upton made it to the top of the ‘gentleman’s game’. As many others struggle with the sport’s gruelling schedule and the pressures of fame, the South African coach shares invaluable lessons for mental health in sports and life. [Read it here.](https://thecorrespondent.com/267/mental-toughness-is-overrated-a-world-cup-winning-coach-debunks-sports-most-sacred-trait/35347916934-cd3abe2e)",12.065342465753426,14.874307041095893,7.076602739726031,70.33106849315071,53.93150684931507,8.579726027397259,39.25753424657536,8.841846274778883,3.849818630136987,406,18,50,5,5,105,48,73,0.096,0.7909999999999999,0.114,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,2,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,6,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,7,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,20,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764347792343661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18369016882449207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24607787313736315,0.0,0.26366303615127995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7862469280401901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601333497604628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718742851325264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,absurdpumpkim,2020/02/03,"People with autism How different is an autistic persons brain from ours in relation to intelligence and how they know things.
One day an autistic person said out loud the expiration date my chips have without even seeing it
He said it correctly.",7.753178294573648,9.619852069767443,7.013953488372092,70.30527131782948,63.1860465116279,10.38449612403101,35.26356589147287,10.504223727775694,4.128742635658915,201,9,31,5,3,62,38,43,0.0,0.9309999999999999,0.069,0.4767,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,2,1,1,2,1,8,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,3,0,6,4,0,4,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,2,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30835552353651696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17814058103738106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28859359169967685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824422740528876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180459386075507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18717543048437307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149781568897606,0.4823734481834705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5255014672092605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22011347082344698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835098726238781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662685131830552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,talithadraven,2020/02/03,"I feel like a failure even if I know I’ve succeeded. Example would be today, I came back home from a school exam, I passed it, so I should be happy, right? No, I cried uncontrollably the whole way home, I kept telling myself what a failure I am, that I’m dumb and should just harm myself. I was really emotional about it until I calmed down a while ago and realized my thoughts were not making sense at that moment. 

This thing keeps happening to me a lot, there were moments where I would pass an exam with flying colors and my first thoughts were “that’s not good enough, I must do better, I must have a retake” even though I basically had 100/100 I was really upset with myself. (I’m using school as example because I don’t do much else in life). 

And I really don’t know what to think about it or how to work on myself to solve these feelings. I’ve tried google searching but haven’t quite found anything that would match what I described. 

I definitely would appreciate an advice, if any of you have one, on how to approach this, what to search etc.

I did shared this with my GP, who I felt like dismissed this exact problem of mine, prescribed me antidepressants and said that I don’t need psychologist yet. And since she won’t give me a paper saying that I need a specialist(insurance covered) and because I don’t have the coin to go to one on my own, I am searching internet for help.",6.526143552311435,6.077399083941607,6.693124087591244,79.61112165450125,65.45985401459853,9.788418491484189,30.31046228710462,9.21078282632365,2.3043326520681267,1095,33,221,17,15,352,154,274,0.081,0.804,0.115,0.8651,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,0,5,13,13,1,2,12,0,30,1,0,4,3,47,52,18,0,13,7,0,3,2,0,9,1,2,2,0,20,11,0,2,10,0,1,5,9,5,0,3,14,6,39,8,25,27,6,23,0,0,1,0,9,8,1,4,11,161,59,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196830492344939,0.10856841834635908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328851978222833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078808671795134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417720756613117,0.0,0.14932161286767948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832090131710714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14008099225606235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345351685965842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231376829413416,0.13777007366116575,0.0,0.12655142018627166,0.1365941645141212,0.16178972882447862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238560427634271,0.0874975511108553,0.11759707029359336,0.0,0.0,0.10417882343342054,0.0,0.13428964410547956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174910420114192,0.06960646804328911,0.10272784721807983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830595442563874,0.13037898112668675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209371183830763,0.0,0.2457087159321849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886313262188578,0.0,0.0,0.13462024743191886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650908549029683,0.11967209363083847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041255154075445,0.0,0.0,0.08175430915569963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003464400051774,0.18163019967956276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598708987749802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171938916492872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13026930272089873,0.0,0.0,0.2353855937865447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045946383975035,0.11650361781283967,0.09739857933475017,0.0,0.2479064060147713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131419122356047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705024480950992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136823738511699,0.07847827838027553,0.12033297266715932,0.19446602066809607,0.0,0.0,0.11609381919979594,0.0,0.0,0.08315380333042648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057807529735746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972164949205688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367411307046595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916467172951156,0.0,0.0,0.3480164193590518,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,megabixowo,2020/02/03,"I need a break from life Last night I had a mental breakdown/panic attack/whatever the hell that was. I started crying and hyperventilating uncontrollably until I started to bite myself all over my arms and hands. I hadn’t self harmed in years. Then I put red face paint all over my face (which stained
my skin) and continued biting myself. I almost cut my hair off and was tempted to hit my head against the wall and drink the makeup remover I was using to get the paint off. I debated waking my mother up and telling her about it but I felt bad about making her miss sleep hours so I went to bed and slept 9 hours uninterrupted.

I don’t know what the hell happened there. But I know it’s all too much. For many months now I’ve been ferling anxious, depressed, with lots of intrusive thoughts and paranoia. I thought I was finally happy, having found an amazing boyfriend, good friends and a career I love. Now I just wanna isolate myself from everything. I’m not motivated to keep studying what I love because I’m not even sure I wanna keep going down that path after quitting everything to go do it. I have the most loving boyfriend but sometimes he irritates me so much and I don’t know if my standards are too high or too low but I feel like breaking up with him, go have meaningless sex that I know will mess me up and regret it for the rest of my life. I wanna destroy everything. I wanna live in a black bubble where nothing ever happens and I just exist in a parallel universe until I’m ready to come back. I hate myself. Everything makes me upset. I can’t see the joy in anything.",3.3567755295231336,5.354197284345048,4.274881079162232,85.06148976452492,74.55910543130992,6.68176547154183,26.60856703348716,7.526774132740827,1.4717479351556029,1262,47,242,16,27,407,179,313,0.2,0.667,0.134,-0.9458,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,2,16,24,5,2,14,0,16,17,10,4,5,55,52,23,0,7,10,1,5,1,1,1,2,0,1,1,10,15,1,2,10,1,0,7,6,14,0,0,13,8,46,10,37,37,8,43,2,4,3,4,11,16,2,5,19,166,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776831720910797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215827119328213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856408952930447,0.0,0.0,0.12243605053982222,0.0,0.08275500522048472,0.08986023331782085,0.06560563416429002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927071935527366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821818534735395,0.0,0.0,0.09269504090729903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542900871375216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108359973451568,0.09735064906675933,0.0,0.0,0.3868964007335481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0544171340941419,0.07688548520483507,0.10333440985948114,0.11789511107574635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800243908487475,0.0831488221341588,0.0,0.056228277510091115,0.0,0.1834929206917829,0.09026858783057234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903403181201694,0.1145660775321253,0.0,0.1062548680821404,0.11045166183355802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370900574584687,0.0,0.0,0.21197282852205887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19131952074744601,0.0,0.0,0.2365858909373277,0.08772664429219018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520338095890513,0.052578882879980124,0.0,0.09503257706445994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091496741025011,0.29140033370216656,0.0,0.143677614909664,0.10911225159849186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845809596361718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590319652283504,0.0,0.15822973789184333,0.07980066786395887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099635962920654,0.0,0.10326662378694726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819026725494026,0.0,0.11446970137829653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857611424622629,0.0,0.11227366564468748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770015322401448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644133476534674,0.0,0.15235141919030346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014328662317607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940667471144164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088037510875084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295122451372323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099767070455198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693053161175896
mentalhealth,burnburnfirebird,2020/02/03,"Depression from university Topped my high school only to find out it means shit all in uni, not exactly flunking, just feeling throughly mediocre.
Friends are all getting attached, while i never even held a hand before.
Not introverted or shy, just ugly.
I tot uni would be the thing to make me an adult, make me a ""man"", get attached, start feeling good about myself, but fuck man im halfway through and its still not happening for me.",5.489666666666667,7.263509300000003,5.245000000000001,81.20666666666669,68.5,7.833333333333335,33.333333333333336,8.344100000000001,2.664333333333334,344,16,61,5,6,106,65,80,0.154,0.737,0.109,-0.7869,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,5,6,2,0,4,0,3,3,2,2,4,21,14,4,0,1,7,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,3,7,2,9,11,2,8,0,2,0,1,4,4,2,1,4,40,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984976736071412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20091721935227108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540742531684252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23589911952784395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21320679319705207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18022571619898045,0.21565662110644,0.2437504543008573,0.0,0.0,0.19565786350871267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20628205712523626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464651509525146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519742757342597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114223435068684,0.0,0.0,0.25410208419276026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799140942167173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17741420987070716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360841732038016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394508176916321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651114407441709,0.0,0.1862916798861592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497585041809206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657100555538563,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fluid_Professional,2020/02/03,"Would this be classified as a manic episode in the case of bipolar 1, or a hypomanic episode in the case of bipolar 2? There are several questions you need to ask a patient before you can assess whether they have a bipolar disorder, and if they have either bipolar disorder 1 or bipolar disorder 2. The following I'm having trouble with, because I can't asses if I'm having manic episodes or hypomanic episodes (where manic fits with bipolar disorder 1 and hypomanic with bipolar disorder 2). The following are the questions that psychiatrist use to diagnose such a disorder:

​

​

Are there periods that last at least a few days in which you feel the opposite of being depressed, in which you work up or are happy and have much more energy than normal?

Answer: Yes

​

​

If yes: Have you felt this way all day or most of the day during that period? Has this ever lasted at least a week and have you been admitted as a result? Have these periods ever seriously put you in trouble with friends or at home, at work or in other situations?

Answer: Yes, it's present during most of the day. It has been a week or longer, but I've never been admitted to the hospital as a result. These periods only ever put me in serious trouble in my romantic relationship.

​

​

Let me explain that last bit, because I feel like if that criteria is met, it might well be bipolar disorder 1 and not 2.

I've had episodes where I would involve in reckless behaviour, sexually and substance abuse, I have episodes where I seem to fall in love with everyone I meet, only for those feelings to just disappear weeks after, when I re-enter the depressive state of the episodes. 

​

​

So would you classify it as a manic episode or a hypomanic episode?",8.823308823529416,8.390057051829269,8.915193687230989,65.51000717360115,60.79878048780488,12.351793400286946,43.07460545193688,11.67016984619884,5.374116714490674,1435,78,231,38,17,472,147,328,0.125,0.7879999999999999,0.087,-0.9045,0,0,0,0,1,0,65.0,0,8,2,2,13,12,0,0,23,3,30,11,1,3,5,57,47,27,0,9,18,0,4,1,1,4,9,0,1,0,18,11,0,0,12,0,0,6,3,7,1,0,6,4,20,5,38,33,10,48,0,2,0,2,22,19,1,19,22,174,38,2,0.0,0.059098002187474075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4323476653564328,0.4848638106065616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046629771610201515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06081108110792344,0.0,0.042443027361349785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054454528785479135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286703204618052,0.0,0.08592075547658178,0.05062574396626894,0.0,0.0,0.4001564959476268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13535418775503635,0.0,0.04766115383031711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566037880464913,0.03563329229548246,0.04789129210662142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03853609397453913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530967128187207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05003231738032599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219731845290682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05100426289251588,0.0,0.02436817166778377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045017397142200086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05291332792614216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03666652089868752,0.036984360777531235,0.03846946256229513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048870452156321256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586986816518314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028356864370057,0.11175092740352548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053550965618682916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04540761749730162,0.0,0.05634863720814778,0.0,0.0,0.05606565273529784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04307910841033781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03959132267665419,0.1200288482002207,0.0,0.04484686478048723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726244510807628,0.0,0.0,0.1062970103494969,0.0,0.4848638106065616,0.0
mentalhealth,notmeimu,2020/02/03,"Struggling with fear of abandonment, keep letting boundaries slip As title says,  I find I'm letting my boundaries slide due to fear of upsetting people, mainly women.  I'm not sure how to change my ways.",8.569459459459459,8.503010945945952,7.570945945945947,73.73317567567568,61.16216216216216,9.562162162162162,37.41891891891892,8.841846274778883,3.4200918918918912,163,7,26,2,2,50,28,37,0.387,0.613,0.0,-0.9490000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,7,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,0,1,3,1,6,3,1,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,14,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668428542651274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5676938270989245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23054830259585615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242078624395336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5158773139659346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17487563722184402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20059616833864166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263702320182377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23773889909497706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20022115839446744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Houria21,2020/02/03,"My sister must have some mental health issues but doesn’t want to get treatment for it. My family and I have all been worried about my sister’s(F25) mental health, we guessed that she could be bipolar, or narcissistic or maybe some kind of adhd. The fact is she is unhappy, cannot keep a job, and keeping good relationship with her is really really hard because she keeps on not only pushing us away but she manipulates us, lie, try to create problems between us and is generally very difficult. I always forgive her because I believe there are things she cannot control (very strong emotions : anger/happiness/ excitement...) but the lies and the manipulation are hard to accept. She refuses to go to a psychiatrist because she refuses to believe she has issues. What can I do? I am getting to the point where I don’t have the patience to be supportive anymore",5.78166666666667,7.741679942675162,6.423328025477705,72.31337845010616,68.04458598726114,9.309766454352443,34.10244161358811,9.725611199111238,3.6779473460721865,689,33,112,16,12,225,98,157,0.16399999999999998,0.738,0.098,-0.9102,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,4,0,0,2,4,9,0,0,7,0,22,3,0,3,3,32,31,9,0,4,6,1,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,6,0,6,2,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,1,2,23,7,15,26,3,6,0,0,0,0,19,4,0,5,0,86,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418568634051903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821577411565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706043154001645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089912127867113,0.0,0.0,0.21586175548129502,0.0,0.0,0.2659732956243584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13238790475186987,0.09424249294755647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277510818048766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112742510358024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333833667011787,0.0,0.06708282923067407,0.0990033660073006,0.0,0.0,0.13003044664756125,0.0,0.0,0.12565198568546015,0.21147493175905988,0.0,0.0,0.2509344330267488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463987538971443,0.11713295377636353,0.3147486350254889,0.0,0.1229167887407225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858346955862363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379059389140959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977203185060594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158258892808602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129449322941938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123433243323875,0.0,0.0,0.1267269630859125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394635377185052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784181661093923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013899491677856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4259499130761503,0.0,0.0,0.1947848502136376,0.06962095076717474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987173485229052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,depressiozionist,2020/02/03,Have you ever been seeking alternative therapy besides CBT? Does CBT and/or alternative therapy work for you? Kindly be specific. I got rewards for you,5.0566,8.629292160000002,6.671500000000003,58.36325000000002,87.4,10.5,38.25,9.516144504307137,6.2284000000000015,124,8,15,5,4,42,19,25,0.0,0.768,0.23199999999999998,0.7691,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,3,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,10,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905860984603397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003653734418302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655770298160168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3457871954451582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7594742758897955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24174209972756736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,petitcoeurr,2020/02/03,"Is it appropriate to go to a walk in clinic instead of a hospital for mental health, in order to get a prescription For context I am a 20 year old woman living in Canada more specifically Ontario. Sorry for the lengths. I have struggled with mental illness my entire life, and have had various interactions with medical professionals because of this. I left home when I was 17, to go to university and because of a bad home environment, left to my own devices; I struggled to maintain my mental health. I tried to kill myself around February 2019, and went to the hospital. I was receiving care from that period (seeing a clinician, medication 60-80mg of Prozac I can’t seem to remember if I made it all the way up to 80mg, seeing a psychiatrist) I was doing better, then a traumatic incident occurred, as a result I missed an appointment. Then my anxiety makes me think, I don’t deserve treatment and I wasted everyone’s time and money because of OHIP. I think they all hate me, I waste their time, that I am a horrible person for taking up time and space. So I stopped going to not face the embarrassment and the traumatic incident that occurred made it difficult to even get out of bed, and eventually I ran out of medication even though I rationed it which was bad, but it made me be able to get out of bed sometimes. Then another incident occurred, and I was housing insecure for five months, finally I got a place. I want to start taking my medication again and take control of my mental health, but I have no clue how to get a prescriptions or any help again. I don’t want to go to the hospital, because they will force me to lay in a bed, and watch me to make sure I don’t kill myself. I have not had a primary care physicians in years, as well. I am sorry if this isn’t coherent. I am also taking a break from uni, if anyone is wondering why don’t I use university campus doctors.",7.350188787185353,6.510552989130439,8.477271167048055,68.78203089244852,63.94565217391305,12.203890160183068,37.03146453089245,11.520995432342351,4.366524999999998,1492,65,275,41,19,515,179,368,0.136,0.802,0.062,-0.9632,1,0,0,0,0,2,40.0,0,0,3,2,12,16,3,4,22,0,26,14,1,9,3,45,60,27,2,5,8,0,0,0,0,1,13,0,5,2,11,17,0,2,5,0,1,8,9,11,1,1,13,3,45,5,51,45,5,43,0,1,3,0,8,15,0,6,17,195,56,3,0.08186640555648465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546853494600313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05567196309707596,0.08584406428936983,0.06262757617250493,0.0,0.0,0.05724289425383405,0.0,0.0,0.0728784576311659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671005815524026,0.19962000388291465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240418291182958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16693651314950556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182013507335668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379373506369031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814397753919744,0.0,0.0,0.07822685881695697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968064568883899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17108727196792364,0.0,0.1861062595592265,0.0,0.06547604316199485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082612663273607,0.0,0.26106048258249376,0.0,0.0,0.05487332597474545,0.0,0.16423735950371987,0.0,0.0,0.0944628404181721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811460964623208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17789617834998078,0.0,0.05782466332178994,0.0,0.0,0.07228953596845464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323919171532643,0.10929292282402184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3298871632618935,0.33000832646741457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534498386411827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590502121982463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071482587597456,0.08553296943031663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273867859350557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047385189851993,0.07452810093146177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096796841393307,0.18328547703828568,0.05794546321695679,0.0,0.0,0.06844398078020261,0.0,0.17116908437992048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771581183878735,0.0,0.24621339431438466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491337412004284,0.0804333278008019,0.0,0.14321087829654053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05558191552085668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070628931002232,0.0,0.0,0.09657385416528708,0.06498174216321964,0.0,0.0,0.07360773035533942,0.07589097813528148,0.07387169750990674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878062463895295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543856216567356
mentalhealth,wammysworld,2020/02/03,"I don't have friends, fun, I feel like I can't feel Yesterday I had a dream were I ran away from home met people had fun and now I feel like my life is gonna come to nothing but having useless friends in middle school and doing nothing but sitting on my computer for days straight through my first years of high school, I dont know what I'm gonna do. I have no interests, I have no friends, I never get invited to partys, and no girl has ever liked me, I feel like I'm not getting to have the fun that every teenager gets to have, I don't have any plan for college, a job, friends, or anything. And I know that coming together to say that you have depression is one thing, but I feel as coming together to say that you have no friends or anything is completely different.",3.0463541666666707,4.213336593750004,4.138750000000002,89.1379166666667,73.6875,7.583333333333335,28.958333333333336,8.07648339933343,1.771583333333333,605,25,132,9,12,197,86,160,0.223,0.6629999999999999,0.114,-0.9628,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,2,2,15,0,0,3,0,22,1,0,0,2,22,41,10,0,0,6,0,5,4,5,2,1,2,1,1,6,7,0,0,7,1,0,4,10,2,0,2,5,7,20,13,15,34,0,18,0,2,0,0,11,6,0,2,11,85,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283037791875214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20046737135883627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144381506067322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147681102410457,0.12770837651042832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855301128509364,0.0,0.104908949481931,0.0,0.0,0.1272584580872865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275248653083106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017800116396148,0.10262448043833812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3079368818307663,0.2610487703861404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360577110367164,0.0,0.0,0.4705243935044026,0.0,0.1909114921475046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869180727113014,0.12217857786288112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087091809850913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338797471663199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860332283885285,0.2380276361661483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394216524655292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337469817585757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253702563171668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844430280247618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19372564565058667,0.0,0.24654275706151524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080920658343001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843729110255941
mentalhealth,MaximumColor,2020/02/03,"I really need help, please. I don't know what to do.

My girlfriend is breaking down. I feel awful. She has a habit of fixating on everything bad in her life, and is now at risk of losing her job. She called me in tears and was saying how the last week has been hell, and how there was nothing good at all in her life. I tried getting her to tell me *something* good that happened today, or in the last week, to give her something good to hold onto. That didn't go so well... 

I tried a usual thing of mine and was giving some tough love by being a little harsh in my approach. It normally works really well with her, because the goal is to force her to take a different perspective by phrasing things as matter-of-fact as possible. It did not work at all this time, and I eventually had to end the call after over an hour. 


To give some context, she has been an incredibly toxic person in my life, and this last month I've really been feeling better and breaking free. I was intending to break up with her so that I don't have to have this horrible weight bringing me down all the time. I asked her for 4 days to just really focus on my schooling (which she agreed to), and she's still being as needy as can be, trying to call me every day. She is a massive dark cloud on my life, and I cannot stay with her any longer. I'm also not willing to keep listening to the same things she complains about every day, because I don't think it's healthy or constructive, and it's taken serious tolls on my own mental and even physical health. 

This is a person I have taken to therapy, which she lived and stuck with for over a year. I've helped her take the steps leading to promotions at the job she is currently losing. She held a management position for over a year. I've done everything I can with my own help, despite feeling that I am constantly beating my head against the same wall. I've made sure she knows what to do in case of suicidal thoughts, I check on with her to make sure she's doing okay, I have maintained a policy of complete transparency with her (up to this point where she does not know of my hope to end the relationship).

She's doing worse than ever, and still leaning on me for everything, saying she's completely unable to function without my help. I am literally the only person she tries to talk to, and the only person she wants to spend time with. And I cannot stay with her anymore. I don't know what to do. Our relationship actually started as what wouldn't have worked out, but she was talking about killing herself at the time, and that I was the only good thing that had come into her life. That went on for about 3 months before she eventually grew on me. This was over 4 years ago.

I'm having flashbacks to those moments, and while she's assured me that she doesn't think that way anymore, tonight makes me question it. And either way, I don't want to leave her feeling completely alone and that she has no one... But I honestly feel like she's been abusing me as a personal feel-good machine, and I can't keep going through that, and the cycle continues and spirals in my head and I just... Help. I need advice direly. I'm finally at the point where I can move on, but I feel like I'll be destroying her by doing it.",5.0820252679938775,5.293912300153141,5.721007274119451,83.12239911944872,68.41807044410413,9.041485451761105,29.035566615620212,8.912814788092511,2.078996355283308,2544,83,527,41,40,827,269,653,0.099,0.823,0.077,-0.9252,4,1,2,0,0,0,78.0,1,0,0,10,20,27,3,1,29,2,58,10,2,7,7,90,104,40,2,7,12,0,7,2,1,2,6,3,0,5,34,35,1,4,14,0,3,10,16,10,2,1,23,10,90,18,99,75,10,93,1,2,0,1,71,40,1,6,38,371,124,10,0.0,0.06987156783513873,0.05754766360831581,0.0,0.0,0.0576262536203259,0.05227466421353322,0.0,0.0,0.061076674638504615,0.0,0.04715947605776456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040102632706394345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696773602527548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055130378855510274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049238727579173185,0.07189694103840573,0.0,0.05018039114079828,0.0,0.0,0.052155487110390766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18064944187612084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05079871350687448,0.18549144331145825,0.06372722637445576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409518966473955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061612651441267416,0.0,0.0,0.05160634481069102,0.06034830465261992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446246588400268,0.0,0.0,0.038950110337413066,0.05334308527889425,0.09937204076842696,0.0,0.15899930737190554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20872428655697567,0.08425848277967128,0.0,0.06460038042237982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030810167482799793,0.16971246876742493,0.0670297089977823,0.24731242291715455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05214829032384411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104351584431006,0.06268393199945484,0.0,0.0,0.1976367200404188,0.0,0.0,0.05857199172291778,0.058075034820294386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170402008341388,0.1048331326866614,0.06524321191942195,0.0,0.12963674589779658,0.14420889575683546,0.0,0.062442288876026784,0.0,0.0,0.20826652282057312,0.0576209786010241,0.05910492134899921,0.052072902556060265,0.0,0.0,0.1319480170503802,0.0,0.0,0.053224068526115,0.055800245935173236,0.07872784966783855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059429387658281166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414095502752752,0.06267735695676413,0.0,0.08745321930541451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0577795354594583,0.056584731298022065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03996060511559783,0.1345514174065485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574581347459258,0.0,0.0647329828359852,0.11149423109973408,0.06648148984962601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606156059172216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15111457596124409,0.0,0.0,0.12662661302808112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379298523731304,0.0,0.05968229218124463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907982620359194,0.0,0.0,0.04174032132367096,0.1257115153652257,0.09418940981107334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450523423733741,0.0,0.11115985533435953,0.0,0.08867843677765881,0.094798093312071,0.05154367804770847,0.0,0.06743903367037356,0.0,0.1567121397452575,0.0755730941441437,0.0,0.0468167727143998,0.13754699091825753,0.0,0.05589807338424295,0.0,0.0,0.16015107204781334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494876041312461,0.0,0.06956582069646496,0.0936176413987488,0.09460673794680713,0.0718113829514505,0.10604489623059586,0.054667158342904684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05684640811291607,0.0,0.1287958324906309,0.0,0.06009698232094352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392711060630137
mentalhealth,jurvekthebosmer,2020/02/03,"Has anyone here been to a mental hospital and had a terrible experience? Share your story. My time sucked. All autonomy taken away. Treated worse than prisoners, according to a kid there who had been in jail before.

They forced us to shower every day and use their shitty shampoo, no conditioner. 

My friend, a black girl that went there the same time as me, had her hair fall out from the mistreatment to it. She was literally forced to wash her hair every day, and use no conditioner, and a shampoo that smelled like fucking bathroom cleaner. Her mother apparently tried to give them the products, but it was ""against the policy"".

Another guy felt he was about to have a meltdown. He asked to go to his room to calm down but they wouldn't let him. (The rooms were locked during the day) So he starts screaming and the gigantic male nurse basically knocks this poor man, who was probably less than 120 pounds at around 5'10, and pulls down his pants in front of everyone, and sticks the gigantic needle into his butt cheek and leaves him on the floor.

They also took me off literally all of my medications and put me on lithium. Just lithium. I went insane from withdrawal and they used this as an excuse to keep me there until my grandma threatened to sue them.

I've been couple times but those are the most memorable.",5.9039231692677046,7.273564314285718,5.876302521008406,78.60134453781517,67.08163265306122,9.356542617046818,29.10564225690276,9.627879704456738,2.6153817527010803,1047,36,192,22,17,329,156,245,0.13,0.823,0.048,-0.9703,2,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,1,1,7,0,9,9,2,0,17,0,16,7,4,3,2,28,31,18,0,1,4,1,3,1,1,1,2,1,3,5,9,13,0,1,2,0,1,8,3,4,0,0,16,6,27,5,35,13,5,31,0,0,1,2,34,15,3,1,9,131,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912335583615627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156197676108052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415638087693667,0.0,0.0,0.13260609006063648,0.1392576060374993,0.0,0.1399529381927678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675409248696748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16482154185150713,0.0,0.28820086679883195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510106549555986,0.1423377802250031,0.0,0.14571158263318595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14302507729528774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150862208331376,0.13771123258227028,0.0,0.1428961225244284,0.08465747018432122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749394036915456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13240260083843802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772726117423266,0.0,0.15232181721784605,0.0,0.07277439139813363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15006165162943608,0.1501167672955245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16060420591543756,0.0,0.0,0.14974606578561606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054347411252993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26057953532941824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550017662152025,0.10113414491567768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791806859261575,0.3859611553066936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761750511331707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518030904526613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sunshine274,2020/02/03,"I love you! Say no more, i freaking love you. I love your voice, your eyes, your face, your hair, i love YOU! People need tell this other people. 

I'm from Russia, you maybe from Korea, USA, Germany, nevermind what are you from! You got a black skin, small asian eyes or fat body? I don't give a shit, i love you whatever you looks like!

We are people who's live on the this goddam planet, we are different, and in this moment we are the same. You need to be friendly! You need to be kind!

I love everything.
I love everyone.
I love you.",0.2627664079040244,2.5175906330275275,1.8616513761467919,96.64938602681723,87.62385321100918,5.188708539167255,15.724064925899787,6.67199483983844,-0.3935510232886377,405,8,92,5,13,131,62,109,0.069,0.5870000000000001,0.344,0.9908,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,3,15,0,0,0,14,2,0,4,0,7,16,8,0,0,9,22,2,0,3,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,6,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,8,27,11,7,19,2,4,0,0,4,8,31,3,2,1,2,56,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292322747553276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155501714563602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11117195191605372,0.10456274310350017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988730742067913,0.0,0.0,0.11160804135883057,0.0,0.0,0.0930511544518375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211546712195914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05683994178105225,0.0,0.10273413682024024,0.0,0.0976998989018728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8400420901761899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168834738821458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25880344353247464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419754381827952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252164662585606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194257385456432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169003479441012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DTSatan,2020/02/03,"For people with depression and/or any type of dissociative identity disorder. Howd you get help? Im gonna go into some detail. I feel like reality is fabricated all the time. I feel like reality shifts on me all the time, sometimes what i think, happens, even if the thought was unintentional. And itll seep its way into a lot of things in my life. Whether it was like mentioning something and it happening in a movie i watch later, or feeling somewhat ok and i can feel a bad thing happening soon and then it does. 

I also feel different throughout the day, like something in me flips a switch? Thats the best way i can describe it. I sometimes feel the switch and notice that i feel different or think differently. Sometimes i dont notice and im just on autopilot until someone mentions ""are you ok?"" Or ""yo, you good?"" And then ill realize something different is going on. Can anyone else relate?? 

I knew since late elementary/early Middleschool i felt off. I knew i was different than the kids around me and that hasnt changed now that im 21. In junior of highschool i had a random breakdown and was diagnosed with severe depression by my doctor that day. But ive only seen a therapist last year and it was only for a couple months (i had a lot going on). And it was helpful for the things i was looking help in for. But i feel like now i was asking the wrong questions. I feel like everyone (including family and best friends) are fake, even though im 99% sure they are genuinely good people and actually care for me. 

Just, i need help on how i can deal with all of these thoughts? Did medicine help any of you? Therapy? Mental health center whether it be voluntary or not?

Tl:dr
I feel like reality is fake, havent done much in getting help, life sucks, i need help.",1.8863260869565224,4.492707281159422,3.5070833333333336,85.280625,83.43478260869566,6.928260869565218,24.856884057971016,8.07648339933343,1.795853623188406,1392,56,270,30,40,460,171,345,0.086,0.753,0.161,0.9715,5,0,3,0,0,0,50.0,0,4,1,2,11,23,1,0,17,2,28,6,0,1,4,62,61,28,0,3,12,0,11,7,1,2,6,0,0,1,19,19,0,0,19,0,0,3,4,7,0,0,18,14,36,16,31,40,10,36,0,2,3,0,19,16,1,11,22,174,55,4,0.0,0.0,0.06524736319162015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05346926824363446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093648211136593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04675124730413895,0.0685077013536836,0.0,0.05952107838486246,0.06250665320767777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582671719425481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033443436466242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681699476596647,0.0,0.07073080103056281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398118674316909,0.0,0.08624051567804868,0.06893146509409738,0.11517574889304008,0.06786320653537045,0.0,0.3492811691842658,0.07662928779887569,0.06843577148857563,0.05851111429602107,0.0684227213543912,0.07836140111842367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05585436134867665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832302950945971,0.0,0.0,0.06388920878389309,0.0,0.0,0.06303124950562845,0.0,0.33807278741986385,0.2388300185963439,0.06419770640097383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051657174780543366,0.0,0.06986494539300085,0.0,0.11399711543567145,0.1121608243886612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17737671133308516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710708484237445,0.0,0.0,0.31371186354922825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.288888388989609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05450120014689335,0.07542289706859526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09445277603357753,0.22865670626339915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05614697890543767,0.0,0.0,0.11368683335893948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738085610542724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053368361969428985,0.0,0.04915103435001418,0.09915418984051058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15224495133073535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170265421750027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927069524533084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490039328565302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553467673267295,0.0,0.05530867976714042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566516918046645,0.15442018342955222,0.19838375912203066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301635026135836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646216800619025,0.07763157386753104,0.13325980488220718,0.08568454063919477,0.06569126960693991,0.10616142450358547,0.07797517665913699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10614339256345323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310276039685402,0.0,0.043056735333312314
mentalhealth,TraderLlama,2020/02/03,"I thought I was getting better but I’m just burying my problems I grew up with a very complicated family situation that caused my older sister to run away at age 19. Things have been better for me since then and once I started going to therapy I thought all my problems were over.

I was diagnosed with depression and ADD about half a year ago, and I wasn’t surprised. After talking things out with a nice old man I felt a new sense of purpose and drive that I hoped would drive me through my last year of high school.

This year I feel overall happier, my grades are better, and I get more sleep. However, I realized that not much has changed and things might have gotten worse. I spend most of my free time in bed or sleeping. Because of this, I hold off on projects until the last possible minute, I barely do any of the activities I used to enjoy anymore, and I can’t will myself to exercise. I just feel constantly sleepy and I’m living in the back of my head a lot of the time. I’ve learned to hate every part of my body, and I simply don’t try hard enough in school even though it’s my last shot at getting into a good college.  

I don’t know what to do at this point and I could never survive in college if I keep being like this. I smile and laugh but I had a horrible revelation that I no longer have a purpose for anything anymore and I just go through the motions as if I were fine.",3.830035211267607,4.78613700352113,4.739549295774649,86.37411267605634,71.57042253521126,7.792676056338028,28.63661971830986,8.07648339933343,1.7339230985915497,1095,41,231,15,20,356,163,284,0.102,0.7290000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.9655,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,4,7,16,1,0,13,0,22,6,4,2,2,49,41,21,0,7,9,1,4,1,0,3,2,0,1,1,13,18,0,2,8,1,2,7,7,4,0,1,11,4,39,13,39,25,7,43,0,1,0,0,3,16,0,7,21,161,52,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564762264998317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337630070092467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21401736473846253,0.0,0.0,0.08879323317816096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137643170979983,0.08296911890875434,0.0,0.065775376940147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28628868833379795,0.0,0.11985355679740625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084392978206432,0.11414482735058805,0.0,0.0,0.11660252232124317,0.0,0.08615007531440859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293487264968228,0.10951712522087806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149045613965047,0.0,0.07126751576079211,0.0,0.09091114787989976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171934981201426,0.0,0.1091158572777876,0.0,0.10360176905499116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691212741878138,0.0,0.12264511707563068,0.0905021415621418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665799751440468,0.10652978343790714,0.11073743563814764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400320734180892,0.0,0.10716992345062684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590726279436854,0.0,0.0,0.05929950359200084,0.2638608636064595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05271492128041928,0.0,0.09527845676112393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917334723820246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446578571174673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931956443644632,0.0,0.08321981305443826,0.10421134543282252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322382610711708,0.11491091917613305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168461417145105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200121133553423,0.12164203347861023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064931459090368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21840290884010613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925672565593128,0.12128511366258547,0.21595761599015406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637280053961505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672664275769255,0.0,0.0,0.1233940636717372,0.0,0.2150536569560402,0.0,0.10601206996772257,0.17132249733773205,0.12583574549852616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325761693871329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319171908510032,0.0,0.0890295289904349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099602182800478,0.07664969164573167,0.0,0.0,0.2084538934647687
mentalhealth,SuperiorLoser_Man,2020/02/03,"I'm tired and feel like giving up. School has officially made me wonder if I'm smart enough to attend. Work seems to kick my butt and it feels like I have nothing to show for either. I'm always tired and emotionally drained. I have a wife I'm not doing good by and I just feel like crying every day after everything. I know this is probably super whiny, but I just feel like a giant dumb loser. I know no one will read this, but I'm so ready to throw in the towel for life.",2.247,3.5876623000000016,3.916999999999998,89.24350000000004,76.0,6.6000000000000005,18.5,7.1686216300943375,0.08579999999999988,370,6,82,4,8,124,67,100,0.191,0.639,0.17,-0.5253,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,3,9,1,0,3,0,6,4,1,1,0,20,21,8,0,1,7,1,4,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,8,2,0,2,2,2,0,1,1,4,8,7,10,19,2,7,0,1,0,1,2,3,2,3,6,45,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349146944530604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17622595401722596,0.1034647427052468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18046331616652728,0.0,0.1657681406817427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517006273987592,0.0,0.14418506578486098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32447499823979026,0.4584478416916469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539000633286159,0.0,0.13456193699378605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763373977317574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133171815274507,0.313513991758862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180372035499798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15393790085274786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108712218423413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729717855500416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047444566461652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16236476812221445,0.0,0.14605038502600656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36878373897653705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739806093179909,0.11679570110982045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jaruz01,2020/02/03,"I find that I several times throughout the day, while I'm in my own head I'll remember something cringy I said or did and I'll often swear at myself. Anyone else do this and any way to overcome it? If I see or hear something that brings back memories that I'm embarrassed about, I say things that probably aren't normal. Like a goddamn, 'I hate myself, I hate everyone, and if I'm pretty depressed, I'll say things like 'I'm going to kill myself.' Don't worry, I don't have any plans to do that, nor have I ever done any self harm, but it has become quite a negative habit, and is probably having a slight edge effect in a negative direction. Thanks for reading",5.222611940298506,5.250123462686566,6.2648880597014935,79.98001865671642,68.1044776119403,9.685074626865672,29.436567164179106,9.516144504307137,2.4771671641791047,520,17,104,10,8,174,81,134,0.20199999999999999,0.716,0.083,-0.9447,0,0,2,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,3,4,9,3,1,5,0,12,1,1,1,1,15,24,11,1,3,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,1,10,4,0,0,3,1,0,2,6,6,0,0,3,5,13,3,8,21,1,11,0,1,1,0,5,3,0,5,7,65,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034986098562642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402087432468173,0.15242868166542914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439212211238615,0.0,0.0,0.16430071940012664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594197331979896,0.0,0.12813221883593848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522396023501972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427517632928875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345676591536025,0.0,0.14215260000184707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596972709111185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454733154652755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937518960286157,0.15267716984993676,0.0,0.1676704617253569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16458789846437286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453594250864892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575941367302644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513488362869522,0.3207905224603341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823130000834254,0.1488065845611329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16852324741364674,0.0,0.14151084343866166,0.2366099074027021,0.0,0.0,0.11854750120434418,0.0,0.15519572304072748,0.1680636040456877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22905517207163625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13696404585277774,0.0,0.0,0.19766747363988124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674684120124923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808378529893082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15107942562714433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,porkupain,2020/02/03,"17M Never had a friend, but I want one. Don't know how to make one. I have never texted, snapped, DM'd, facetimed or phoned anyone. I've never been to a party or gone out for dinner. I've never had a girlfriend or done much more than talk to a girl. I don't hang out with anyone, or talk outside school. I'm a loner and I'm getting tired of it.

I'm unbelievably lucky. I was born in the best city in Canada, if not the world, to an upper-middle-class family and go to a great school. I grew up in a great neighbourhood, and as a kid, I would spend hours outside with my only friend catching lizards in nets and jumping on his trampoline. When I started middle school we grew apart and stopped talking. Even though we still go to the same school, we don't know each other anymore. I only ever had him as a friend, and when I lost that friendship, I never made a new one. I don't want to be friends with him again, as it has been almost a decade, and we are not in the same place socially.

As a senior in high school, I am awfully lonely. I have a few people I talk to and sit with at lunch, but I am an outsider, and just tag along. I have a few people I chat to in school, but otherwise, I'm pretty much a loner. I'm not ugly and I don't have bad hygiene. I'm not socially awkward or cringy. I'm self-aware and take social cues. Every day I watch my peers grow older and experience all the teenager things, first love, first kiss, first girlfriend, first break up. I'm getting tired of seeing people enjoying life with their friends while I sit on the sidelines.

People in my grade are going to parties and hanging with friends. On Instagram, I see pictures of all the people in my school doing cool shit with their friend's: camping, fishing, swimming at the beach or skiing. Parties are practically live-streamed, and I'm writing this while my feed is overflowing with the latest pictures of the parties my peers are at. The people in my grade look amazing, they go to the gym they are fit and healthy. The girls look like models, and the guys look like adults. I'm by no means ugly, but definitely look young for my age, skinny and average height.

I don't think loneliness would have hurt this much before social media. Everything I see hurts. People wishing each other happy birthday on Instagram, while on my birthday I wake up to my school alarm and a text from mom. I see Snapchat stories of the girl I like snorting coke off a table, and boys shitting in the urinal. As stupid as all that is it sure beats being lonely. Trump is president, the forests are burning, oceans rising, and I'm about to die from god damned coronavirus because some idiots couldn't help but eat a bat because it's a trend. What good is there in the world because I can't find it.

I'm tired of sitting in my room on the weekend listening to Radiohead and wallowing in my loneliness, while across the city my peers are living it up. I try to put myself out there, I played soccer for the school, I run a club, I volunteer and get good grades apart from in English. I'm going to university next year for engineering. It is a big school in a big city. People tell me life will change in college, but I don't see how. In high school I'm surrounded by people my age, who are going through the exact same experiences I am. University is no different if I can't make friends now what is going to change.

I don't see the point anymore, I feel like I'm living for my family, not myself. People tell me to find god, but if god existed why the fuck would he make me like this. What is the point of waking up every morning to go to school or work just to die in 80 years, if I'm lucky? I used to only feel the loneliness mentally, it weighed on me like a brick every day, but now I'm feeling it physically. I wake up exhausted, I feel weak, I don't have an appetite and I can't sleep. I've realized that loneliness is more than emotion, it is a disease. I'm in a race to make a friend before the loneliness consumes me. I feel like I am racing against time, but I don't know the race track.

tl;dr how do i make a friend.",3.842637868791236,4.740786499398322,4.793907838499525,86.21163357400722,71.49097472924187,7.656425577824804,26.601954437943483,7.873277556716777,1.411438839785883,3195,102,669,40,58,1042,325,831,0.11699999999999999,0.691,0.192,0.9969,1,4,1,0,0,0,109.0,4,0,4,8,17,48,6,2,58,2,58,24,8,10,11,118,124,59,2,11,27,1,5,7,12,4,7,1,1,7,23,41,7,1,13,9,1,20,26,16,0,7,10,19,78,32,101,107,17,120,0,5,11,3,49,58,4,15,45,417,101,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042828143558768725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483302485741458,0.05981178967106855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035711302472066685,0.07821688946298612,0.0,0.07278852294930704,0.0,0.04488465097638402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049032995814182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055166438141248005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08877736046676918,0.0446857207710578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04376872975973696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04376455785887783,0.0,0.04811068054567516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028249291563092138,0.03868806418940828,0.10810712968085068,0.0,0.03843906776616834,0.08367485947300675,0.08063981295749363,0.0,0.10812940627617544,0.06111003091101382,0.0,0.0,0.07818231457103318,0.1455211269221349,0.0,0.0,0.3304412450084462,0.03954032969082461,0.0670369400848623,0.0,0.19445816984490066,0.07174717279761587,0.0,0.09430851899918877,0.0,0.04234918909836289,0.0,0.045529637490676234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02866794101290248,0.09037805819234612,0.0,0.0,0.04211999855618858,0.0,0.0915726955499334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051609482810077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060419666850992614,0.146267400449602,0.0,0.11330052167500475,0.0,0.14366467149468548,0.0,0.046688689052275655,0.0,0.03860174507706101,0.0404701656313626,0.14274709109526032,0.0,0.0,0.046589249764552594,0.0,0.0,0.0431022681279089,0.0,0.0,0.050091902020599925,0.0,0.0,0.09432298061055952,0.0,0.16493494530464592,0.04130769327213592,0.04548655723317521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694651505496269,0.0975859166410091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965144814805899,0.0,0.0446857207710578,0.0,0.08086326366356451,0.0,0.0,0.04351263542883066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04299583047831549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5194283020129521,0.20449371111609366,0.0,0.04461861143075815,0.0,0.0878059224677516,0.0,0.0,0.04280105454954297,0.17439519407395318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030272943947912998,0.0,0.03415631017292392,0.03575777427083837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04031037571201943,0.0,0.03215784235513538,0.13750815873944305,0.07476602129187065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028414598115319774,0.02740539567550707,0.042021471378025664,0.0,0.02493962800372077,0.14747404375497175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029038135509945086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03693969146528192,0.0,0.0,0.05045390461429817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0385934227444431,0.0,0.049183580641789744,0.0,0.0,0.031137190563524493,0.0,0.0,0.09114809732343536,0.0,0.0,0.05508516983355323
mentalhealth,raspyberries,2020/02/03,"How to get through a long school day? I’m only on my 3rd week of the semester but I’m already burning out. There is one day in the week that I’m particularly dreading— Monday. On Monday, I am stuck at school for an entire 12 hours straight. I have morning classes, work on campus on break, and a night class. It’s an incredibly long day and I dread it every time it comes around, and when it does, I’m miserable and it goes on even longer. How do I get over this dread feeling?",0.7206060606060625,2.94631358585859,2.461414141414142,93.44545454545455,84.85858585858584,5.216161616161617,21.12121212121212,6.574015621080383,0.2422242424242427,371,12,83,4,11,122,66,99,0.15,0.81,0.04,-0.9195,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,3,6,0,4,0,0,2,0,11,13,8,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,1,1,5,0,14,12,0,26,0,1,0,0,0,11,0,0,13,47,12,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285338281425324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184357929027412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17839349446440014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40067628057385657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18122971137975916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678390284282996,0.0,0.1744859700269724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471315480248687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163965605761366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20394627516171265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665440670922552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943440722557131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033253000627208,0.1575046287543221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4191811927842128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075841428371245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33223728352736204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15076719496938856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,somatotropical,2020/02/03,"Has anyone else been really struggling with reality for the past couple years? That title probably wasn’t clear enough. 

I have terrible depression and anxiety, maybe even autism, I have never been able to afford to go to a doctor for a diagnosis or treatment... 

But until recently, one thing I did know was that no matter how screwed up my thinking was, there was a baseline for normal human behavior. Survival in society would require me to try to emulate that baseline human behavior. 

Normal humans knew the difference between right and wrong, a difference existed, hate and cruelty were bad, generosity and kindness were good, etc. That’s an oversimplification, maybe because I was never quite able to pinpoint what the normal baseline was. I’ve never been able to survive. 

Now, there doesn’t seem like there even is a normal anymore. It doesn’t seem like there is a truth or a reality anymore. Ask ten people which way is north and they’ll each tell you with unwavering conviction which direction is north, and their answers will all be different, and none of them will match a compass. 

I’m starting to think _no one_ has _anything_ figured out. And that would be comforting, except _they’re_ all surviving and thriving and happy and I am not. I can’t keep a job. I am living in poverty. I worry all the time. I can’t talk to people. I don’t relate to people at all. I can’t function in this mess. 

Has anyone else had this problem?

(On tip of all that, I 100% know this will get downvoted and _I just don’t get it_.)",3.6958830409356733,6.174088950877197,4.8810526315789495,78.86847953216376,75.28070175438597,7.871345029239768,28.099415204678365,8.735056554316923,2.5325906432748546,1201,50,209,26,27,395,159,285,0.146,0.753,0.1,-0.9498,3,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,3,5,9,16,2,1,14,0,39,2,0,1,10,52,54,17,0,7,6,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,3,15,16,0,2,9,0,0,1,15,9,0,3,14,0,19,7,27,32,9,22,0,1,0,1,10,10,1,4,12,155,34,3,0.29467072069298256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514076492696706,0.0,0.1948227830285199,0.1373604128960349,0.20128331728311186,0.08082963185258171,0.0,0.09182578207486412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201258112480478,0.0598761787665652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868251590670082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459981998254304,0.0,0.0,0.30786818565830903,0.0,0.10053598963227248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410638387864634,0.0,0.0,0.1014912083082118,0.10954524875330246,0.12975148794130667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026355263177323,0.0,0.05582272041974839,0.08238527331987468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456082051915548,0.0,0.09697544360552852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747174061655997,0.08730562528456602,0.0,0.10228473681651366,0.10796221452517554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959741531583762,0.0,0.08673321499658987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19735756358194592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22726822567213464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849529890148254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311767098650473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09376551519616463,0.2042875752246316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590162528520228,0.09398669451769688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447286106431604,0.0,0.0,0.0629245363836538,0.0,0.09698392911456534,0.0,0.0,0.0838823951394477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17883810470707076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952315092278966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268460571369226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894838778816783,0.08585173267447571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06525537775846141,0.12587539969190184,0.0,0.0,0.05727495563841399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668735888547457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796530076434495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975080684029734,0.0,0.13955041697619416,0.10739205829769162,0.0,0.06325276098906857
mentalhealth,sadboicat,2020/02/03,"How should i feel Im stuck i dont know how to feel

Im a 16 year old girl who is homeschooled and lives in America and i am just confused 

I know im not depressed im just sad alot im not even sure if i have anxiety i think im just over reacting to everything around which makes me also think i have paranoia because i dont trust anyone. I feel that i have some sort of trauma but im not sure my mother says i dont and i haven't been abused (not to my knowledge) i don't think anythkng trauma has really happened other than a fire when i was 4. have always had attention issues and my mom says me and my dad have add and me and my dad agree that i have dependent personality disorder but...do i?

I dont know how to feel about myself and all this stuff

I dont cut anymore because my friends  dont want me to but sometimes i accidentally just mindlessly play with knives or other dangerous stuff without thinking about the consequences

I dont think i have always been shy but i remember myself not talking to kids but only adults because adults cool

I have always had trust issues i dont really remember trusting anyone except for an ex but that was for something small

Idk how to feel i have people telling me theres something wrong and i have people (my parents and a close friend) telling me nothing is serious 

I constantly doubt how i feel and i bounce from ""im fine im just over reacting just shut up"" to ""i hate myself i should die i dont deserve food""

And should mention i have a horrible diet and i either rarely eat or i eat to much and most of it is junk food so telling my mother she would say this and i some what agree

I have no motivation to do anything and when i do i lose it when i start thinking of something else 

And i wont be able to get therapy because my mother has said no even if i payed for it... she says they will give me meds for issues that can be fixed at home. if i was put into school they would give me adhd meds. i hope that if i get to go to a really school (most likely not because i have no motivation to learn wven if i want to so i will always be dumb and in the 9th grade) i will get some form of help.

Idk why i made this...maybe to vent? Idk im sorry",0.4112588318909651,2.5078375501066112,2.564061206572184,93.05876290814837,85.01279317697228,5.725339688114053,20.283498474016472,7.048011613610866,0.3785971069024625,1717,52,389,24,51,579,193,469,0.192,0.721,0.087,-0.9923,1,0,3,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,2,3,23,25,4,2,9,1,52,5,0,12,3,102,83,41,1,13,27,8,7,1,2,9,0,5,1,5,17,23,5,0,22,1,1,2,22,13,0,0,10,13,74,12,39,61,10,20,0,3,0,0,33,11,1,18,8,259,91,7,0.04997970983666086,0.059217783413810114,0.0,0.0,0.0600658986940743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03996875589920588,0.1663484895007165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03823434122456395,0.0,0.049566442209309315,0.06989395040785855,0.0,0.04112904264830505,0.04449253806844992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523358361076675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05401031071622117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043047450846329764,0.0,0.05187104803190963,0.0,0.0572810775118076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5271826292919973,0.0,0.0,0.10228344122228687,0.04175163431224007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602225395448946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044918540490896615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162745809401246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087132704678875,0.0,0.07722839967954685,0.0,0.07833700665961436,0.09589018375166322,0.028404620883039536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04419689234803269,0.0,0.0,0.049344616132415184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03350034597644607,0.0,0.050133724062623605,0.04964112910915529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5398666318486196,0.15649749579959876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240262433169013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02441756165353447,0.0,0.04413299945650336,0.0,0.0,0.05591451099256433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04729200990627615,0.033361844414778394,0.0,0.050211336260516236,0.0,0.11103238101896246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05853563210392685,0.0,0.0,0.03674083746906477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047956879548504534,0.0,0.05244529798143727,0.0,0.0,0.038011821502761466,0.0,0.0,0.055496553073725655,0.0,0.0,0.06929927553677895,0.04364035482209529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05024341287432987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605484577493316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323453656556973,0.0,0.047542149293054,0.15898348520310868,0.0,0.10116426928812336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154304672598759,0.04943121100632898,0.055948193263029335,0.035375895866543335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442962044432604,0.0,0.0,0.09421057007096564,0.0,0.0,0.0401717975689477,0.13105340802637647,0.0,0.057156153973124874,0.0,0.0,0.1921498798266016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0589586555825856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045098914281015125,0.0,0.0,0.048178656752436363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100830376006864,0.05464496676009472,0.0,0.032185294485655304
mentalhealth,milceries,2020/02/03,"Not being able to drink is making me crazy I'm taking wellbutrin and abilify for bipolar depression and some undiagnosed thing that gives me the attention span of a gnat. They're really helping me feel normal, even good. But I REALLY miss being able to drink.

I'm in my 20's and the thing to do is go to bars, party with friends, etc. I've been fine not drinking for a few months, and the other day I tried sipping a beer and I got what felt like a hangover just minutes later. So not doing that again while on these meds.

Drinking (responsibly) and being buzzed (never blackout drunk haha) with friends was one of my favorite fun things to do and I'm really missing it lately. I'm also so much more relaxed and confident and funny buzzed. I miss that a lot too. Weed just doesn't hit the same. 

I guess I'm just venting but it really is getting me down lately. Makes me really consider stopping/switching meds, but this current cocktail is helping me feel the best I have in a while. I really miss buzzed me.",3.28660951817913,5.220590407035175,4.510972509606859,83.5706148389004,74.57788944723617,7.295418267809636,25.776234111735143,8.124751697461798,1.6899622228791007,797,28,151,13,17,262,116,199,0.07200000000000001,0.767,0.161,0.9431,1,0,5,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,9,14,0,0,11,1,14,8,0,2,1,32,35,17,0,1,9,0,3,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,12,11,8,0,4,9,0,1,5,5,0,1,4,3,16,9,15,27,8,16,0,5,0,0,5,5,0,3,11,104,28,0,0.2392700985046937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567210566414897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554960329434606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715470960707632,0.0,0.1030414926180914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4687872109134746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13342470401343162,0.0790178217261535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098215106602725,0.0,0.11486840856329054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848594845695844,0.0,0.06250437547978717,0.11476484050665757,0.06799135548090063,0.10034420326640192,0.09568307775683904,0.0,0.1317914945261736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603777034304826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699070929852095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058447642064941935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170944068449847,0.0,0.0,0.15971464871464727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657751398561615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954915549282763,0.0,0.08794552658566808,0.0,0.09226992525025172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721694734122473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106780555280049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4598476558894106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995066827218147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238440632390592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122434539146269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ffscrdsweggcsw,2020/02/03,"Kinda worried about my mental health Here’s what I know:

I’m a pathological liar, I lie so damn much. Too much. Exactly how it’s described too, I create fake stories, I’ve done this since kindergarten.

I have a empathy without sympathy. I run a lot of scams online, in which I’ve taken advantage of poor people and children, and don’t care. Only realty progressed when I was 13-14 or so.

I have depression + social anxiety, not really something I need to show evidence for. Started when I was 12 or so.

I compulsively have shouted things I’ve heard before. One time I was in a busy area, and shouted “Alex is a stupid *****”, just because before I heard it on a YouTube video. I did not consciously authorize this. It’s happen other times too. 

I see shadow figures all the time, and would full figures a lot when I was young (3-8).  I also would hear whispering and couldn’t find where they were coming from. I still hear them, but rarely, and they are incoherent gibberish now.

More Recently I hear pianos playing that aren’t there sometimes, only really now has this started... it’s not really that bad though because I can then play the pieces I hear and they are usually pretty good.

That’s all. Read the first sentences of each paragraph if you don’t want to read the whole thing.",2.1044585253456205,4.710027717741936,3.518317972350232,85.61354838709677,82.30645161290323,6.768663594470048,23.776497695852534,7.957251820313856,1.5961965437788024,1006,37,190,20,28,329,152,248,0.085,0.805,0.11,0.8289,2,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,4,3,20,11,3,0,11,0,21,2,0,1,3,35,38,21,0,6,9,0,0,0,0,2,2,9,0,1,15,9,0,0,5,6,1,2,8,6,0,2,10,10,26,5,12,25,11,24,0,1,1,0,13,6,1,6,16,132,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334122551985644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929075190243975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745662079979092,0.14230328978705284,0.0,0.1986408500556986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900418066662245,0.0,0.0,0.1005442504864951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053107051005396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944544734596887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668028966962237,0.0992822741196704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978994958005752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321542422631427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406827900432375,0.5262092910994645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414645446699295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19846294329001654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762666466276984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716057815077754,0.08654666408534202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909273312189027,0.177542178808737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091919751709951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874656250088003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23350388186175186,0.0,0.22432214413587,0.0,0.11524726906239648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301101089667507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655228360011796,0.0,0.0,0.11898170272188628,0.0,0.08985703152347016,0.11543941537477367,0.0,0.16523053569008309,0.0,0.09321302607336812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508763455879152,0.0,0.1146771559155768,0.0,0.20418173247651386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855098062435846,0.0,0.0688446893488497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031410774887398,0.0,0.11251425679882787,0.0,0.0,0.11853518598462705,0.0,0.16582958228086167,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,njaanthanne,2020/02/03,"Getting cold while not taking Antidepressants I gone through a rough patch and slowly getting back to life. I used to get cold and thought infection when I am extremely stressed. I started taking Escitalopram for almost 8 weeks and things are far better. I felt better, so I haven't bought tablets, and missed it for last 5 days. But I started getting cold again. Should I continue taking tablets? I haven't got a chance to visit the doctor yet.",4.932874564459934,7.272316085365857,4.663937282229966,82.48890243902441,71.07317073170732,7.124738675958188,30.00696864111498,7.957251820313856,2.123750522648084,357,15,63,5,7,109,56,82,0.08900000000000001,0.833,0.078,0.0431,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,5,4,0,1,3,0,5,3,0,1,0,11,21,8,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,1,2,3,2,0,0,5,5,9,2,6,15,0,14,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,11,37,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203792049773318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15649137501294202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3599870335474137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312510953465793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20830742715630726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954074420269416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4253152030487856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16277047539513034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16589284423315862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437494919350033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880995899975132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331270889786377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4590565034074526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520710243861314,0.0,0.0,0.16156910867354002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757726302419298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16324839836594834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dracosadra723,2020/02/03,"Personally I think smiling to hide your pain is one of the major reasons as to why people lash out at society or kill themselves. The whole ""smile to hide your pain"" is not healthy and I would even go further as to argue that it's a key reason as to why some people lash out at society or kill themselves (which god forbid) now sure there are many different reasons as to why one does something it's not just one reason but I feel this is one of them. Smiling to hide your pain keeps one from venting out their problems and not being honest to themselves and if one keeps on doing it, something is going to happen where they are provoked enough and the pain that they are suffering is gonna rear it's head out and they are gonna do something awful like hurt themselves or others. Now I'm not saying vent out your problems to everyone but talk to people you trust about your problems or find therapy, this could help you from doing something drastic (which I know is very obvious) but I think the whole sentiment of smiling through your pain is what causes alot of bad stuff to happen.",11.082122641509436,7.129066646226415,9.773301886792456,72.19221698113208,59.424528301886795,12.29811320754717,41.12264150943396,9.188382445141503,3.7441962264150943,867,31,164,9,8,270,106,212,0.251,0.649,0.1,-0.9903,1,0,4,0,0,0,12.0,0,8,5,0,7,19,3,0,6,1,17,6,1,6,2,46,30,17,2,6,13,0,1,1,0,3,5,1,0,1,13,10,0,3,9,0,0,2,4,15,0,6,0,2,18,4,32,25,6,14,0,2,0,0,18,10,0,7,3,119,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735319643851935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046869654535948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031404458776437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201089293324692,0.0,0.0,0.07706770859519169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099637899913064,0.0,0.05816718398185115,0.0,0.0,0.08415144685202597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044529138400992714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049131189048601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010060001752744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15575407470373245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038177806088496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059029211247796275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094277157674392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655534897218584,0.19486537411108,0.0,0.04839912123562448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043024911026769135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892857485708022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580573995271706,0.0,0.4685455612397939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18316295499705748,0.07689639162334203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25280363741169104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621886863580233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003412546517811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711920026579536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008152310272028,0.0,0.0,0.08300176431617122,0.0,0.0,0.07078462791304838,0.0,0.0,0.10071187591206726,0.0,0.0,0.11285909161951102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266419963319651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383993293691992,0.19664651310994413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06256001305102707,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,greengremlinman,2020/02/03,"lack of empathy with people irl Ok, so I'm able to feel empathy for people and animals like in documentaries n shit, but not for my friends irl? 

I only have a couple of friends, but anytime they vent to me I just don't care at all. I listen to them vent, but it's more because I don't want to be mean and ignore them than my caring about their problems??  I give them advice usually as a response to their vent, and it ends up with me getting annoyed because they won't listen to anything. 

is this a lack of empathy, or am I just selfish? ig me not wanting to be mean would not = lack of empathy necessarily, so it's probably just me being selfish? But is this even selfish?? I don't tell them about my problems because I know it's unfair to them to listen to me if I'm unwilling to listen to them? I'm not sure lmfaoo. 

is this a lack of empathy problem or what?",2.090184162062613,3.5773765082872937,4.436441988950278,84.74755432780847,76.73480662983425,7.257605893186003,27.536279926335176,8.021203637495839,1.7775742909760583,672,28,141,11,15,235,87,181,0.303,0.66,0.037000000000000005,-0.9949,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,10,0,8,16,2,0,4,1,13,1,1,0,2,36,30,13,0,11,14,0,1,1,2,2,0,4,0,0,8,5,0,1,4,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,0,5,26,7,28,25,6,5,0,0,0,0,18,3,1,3,3,105,34,0,0.15926912405365182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556359447136574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310649184872994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912669392216283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32477097340676697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17622825641821094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106517033097926,0.0,0.0,0.10519575433455347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053125462325476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.246101860319414,0.0,0.08321154372735771,0.15278545655209688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753014533245403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781084901841227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34698153487616673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113134578440078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22083431353175775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17171905361380455,0.4571971258629158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16348746708226114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010926454790674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920823449369926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17541243877273724,0.0,0.18788211177511552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314021607330467,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway283763178,2020/02/03,Mental Breakdown need advice I’m an 18 M in the U.S. who is in his last semester of high school. Tonight I had a mental breakdown and took a hammer and completely destroyed my room from doors to walls to trophies of mine. I’ve been suffering from depression and anxiety for the last 4-5 years stemming from my mom dying when I was 12. I’ve been taking medication and been to regular therapy and intensive group therapy with some success. Currently I’m looking for a new therapist and have not seen one for a while. My dad has called family and want to take me to a mental hospital as he believes I want to hurt myself. I have never wanted to and do not plan on ever harming myself. I am not sure I want to go to a mental hospital this minute although I haven’t ruled it out. As a legal adult what authority do I have over what happens to me. Any advice is helpful.,4.389310344827585,5.340175459770119,6.001781609195403,77.85887931034483,70.26436781609196,9.47816091954023,30.59195402298851,9.725611199111238,2.953940229885057,686,28,131,16,12,235,107,174,0.122,0.802,0.077,-0.8946,1,0,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,0,2,2,7,1,0,10,0,15,1,0,0,3,22,29,13,1,5,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,5,10,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,1,7,2,17,2,26,22,1,20,0,3,2,0,9,8,0,1,10,91,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563460783066219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089196780791846,0.0,0.10034095930195358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477781761555511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13393425468401898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752413487786752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297232736546735,0.0,0.13612868831582395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11864636217820215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365080360826912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454416152412723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598888418973535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791721642282006,0.1385831528395183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041497590393925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138341615828733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014566768526383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321350611267582,0.5287343703700645,0.0,0.0,0.15361900559910166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972572759628634,0.1011626281462509,0.12668009215239265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888808812354398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13274610601803594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362157519313215,0.0,0.19723969606013392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999974962816388,0.15229281617267867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457292767133862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30945834926583543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446603813933927
mentalhealth,That_one_guy445,2020/02/03,"I’m too scared to get help and feel trapped as a bit of background i’ve(m14) been dealing with long periods of sadness, self harm, and frequent thoughts of suicide but it seems impossible to talk to anyone about it. i just want to talk to someone but every path is a dead end. i love my parents and i’m sure they love me but whenever i tried to talk to them about this they either shoot it down, or promise to get me help and then don’t ever follow up.


I can’t directly get a therapist because i can’t pay for one, i can’t talk to my parents, and any other adults that could help me (school counselors, doctors, etc...) would have to talk with my parents and they won’t do anything/ tell me i’m making it up


I feel like i’m just begging for attention but i promise i’m not i just want help, if anyone could give some advice it would be appreciated. Thanks",1.442525252525254,3.623564363636362,2.839242424242425,92.12191919191922,81.5,5.502020202020201,24.550505050505052,6.691623216298621,0.7700148989898996,672,26,144,7,18,218,96,176,0.10800000000000001,0.6559999999999999,0.23600000000000002,0.9811,3,1,0,1,0,1,20.0,0,0,4,0,7,10,0,1,3,0,14,3,0,1,2,34,34,14,2,7,11,3,2,1,0,3,1,0,0,2,8,8,0,0,5,0,1,1,6,3,0,1,2,2,20,7,23,26,4,10,0,1,0,2,23,3,0,4,7,91,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471089349425542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798283514929012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641618376200586,0.0,0.09660091011167647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155907097793979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815807314837033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18745067351840086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102261043512455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015232378106387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039715584941348,0.0,0.13091944730465846,0.0,0.1061848131651564,0.0989050551507062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871052267575953,0.08386252130675785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839922753236044,0.11260995180942167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147327243236083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057350196517073765,0.0,0.0,0.10388531858842168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118957965324556,0.0,0.07835787866568678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07954563119065068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3910388272947403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117526582139238,0.11880364645951914,0.0,0.10686627713991337,0.12246203106127106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946307710720258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840420102915173,0.0,0.11063747445833393,0.0,0.0,0.4717630117440023,0.10260291085012303,0.1080757569143743,0.0,0.13629734561438064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319352710258501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969923174993503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847781084866456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16677914989085438,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,awesomesauce295,2020/02/03,"lost a friend Hi first time poster, I recently lost a friend and would like someone to talk to about it if anyone is there xxx",1.0187179487179492,3.4000906153846167,1.405384615384616,100.42294871794874,85.15384615384616,5.005128205128205,16.358974358974358,6.42735559955562,-0.5767025641025643,100,2,23,1,3,30,22,26,0.146,0.5710000000000001,0.28300000000000003,0.6486,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,1,3,3,1,0,3,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,13,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036487107758924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477370268581226,0.0,0.0,0.4500379199701592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14228999568678166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6358673689987644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875741520245809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467751057899952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340956473837113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698301661969762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20689558153083065,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,comparablebeast,2020/02/03,"Are there any resources to help someone who cannot financially afford to go to a hospital for suicidal thoughts but really feels like they need to? Getting to the point, I know I'm not the only person in this situation so maybe this could be helpful for me and others who are in the same boat.

I am very barely employed, been off of health insurance for a year and can't afford to pay the monthly premiums and since I started a new job (last job didn't offer benefits), it'll be a few months before I can even consider registering for benefits....I've not been doing so well and it's been in the back of my mind for a while that I'm running out of options, hopeless and what's worse is that my impulsivity is made worse due to adjusting to new sleep patterns and a general increase of stress.

I feel like I'm backed into a corner and I feel like I can't really take it anymore. Many nights I feel scared to be left alone and I find myself in my car, driving to gas stations just to avoid closets and ovens and and researching about ways and people who've been successful at it and it's getting to be too much. Are there any resources for people who'd like to voluntarily admit themselves into hospital but maybe can't afford the stay?

Even when I had insurance, I remember calling a representative who worked for the behavioral health claims department and realized that what I thought was covered was definitely not and only after paying several thousand dollars would I be able to get a treatment like this covered. I broke down and cried on the spot because I was in the process of an attempt when she'd called me back. I've come a long way from then (over a year ago) but unfortunately not in the opposite direction, I'm back and feeling like I'm about to fall to my knees in front of my suicidal thoughts and I need help. 

It feels stupid to even write this, someone who supposedly needs so much help but wont get it because....she can't afford it....well that's exactly what my situation is. It feels stupid to try to plan for a voluntary visit like I'm planning some fucking vacation but I'm not. I feel like I need something drastic...and if I do go and it does help, even a little, I don't want to be FUCKED afterwards by the bill but maybe that's just the name of the game....

If it's not and if anyone has insight into US-based services that help people in this situation, please let me know. Tired of fighting for myself....and eventually, not sure how eventual it is, I'll decide it's not worth it anymore.",4.976337575757576,5.754079818000005,5.942290909090911,79.44581212121214,68.82000000000001,9.260606060606062,31.15151515151515,9.41862664789215,2.7047733333333337,1999,80,394,40,33,662,228,500,0.134,0.725,0.14,-0.5677,7,2,1,0,2,2,54.0,0,0,1,5,22,22,5,3,27,0,40,7,2,2,2,83,78,37,2,10,19,0,8,8,0,3,3,0,2,1,33,25,0,1,20,1,5,11,16,10,1,1,13,8,32,12,59,52,6,57,0,2,0,2,23,21,2,5,30,253,65,9,0.06905855110709214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061216238801896035,0.0,0.0,0.071523831977642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392436574289133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697505222399287,0.04828734462536987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21240705228556386,0.0,0.04209745177658603,0.0,0.0587637405895071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14103300377846528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948782691675077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05513763371356615,0.0,0.07585757565140061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060433603451179874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824500867981085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793446273363001,0.24667721354728794,0.0,0.0,0.06311826461074209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768703540767884,0.14432097066748467,0.0,0.07849513209819049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14681202100680432,0.0,0.0,0.2777309466918145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13705991212908933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590554730264283,0.056291936274314315,0.0,0.0,0.07503231784044907,0.07061704736698847,0.0,0.2699081583101629,0.06921481054164133,0.0,0.061114644583906926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534487082344123,0.0,0.07001453165439334,0.2081357900616764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697294502381733,0.0,0.1102437532733444,0.0,0.10153196208488792,0.2048241624327402,0.0,0.13339435798059876,0.0,0.06480677205945691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050442800288772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14362951216547645,0.06029926311422239,0.0,0.07580555122190179,0.06528265249256385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848135236893499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822987624435286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913965701984566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801650601594921,0.0,0.05712594710716285,0.2328741146527151,0.06910842436680135,0.0,0.11702617249914075,0.05316464653778681,0.0,0.0,0.048879997916011685,0.07360722694755824,0.0,0.0,0.07910633696868535,0.0,0.0,0.15107769250951222,0.0,0.06508686714405237,0.0,0.05192343598980613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447432699205172,0.0,0.07937264557434172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04688622307936565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306893402670419,0.0,0.0,0.056980537059900964,0.04073252268832553,0.1096309269156896,0.0,0.0,0.06209193104385196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050275447689337165,0.0,0.14075312683040753,0.04905721331985068,0.0,0.0,0.08894288547886191
mentalhealth,somegreat,2020/02/03,"Self harm scars I have several cigarette burn s ads and small cut scars from self harm, some are years old and some are weeks old

I have a professional job and am 29

I wonder, how do people who don’t self harm perceive these when they see them?

I can’t always  cover them at work and I get so self conscious and sometimes I get super triggered just looking at them like I want to do it again.

But I’m so worried about what other people think they are and if they think I’m crazy.

Anyone got any feedback?",1.7948076923076923,3.8560027115384656,2.7621538461538457,93.78284615384615,79.57692307692308,5.313846153846153,20.015384615384615,6.2581,-0.034869999999999735,398,10,86,3,10,126,67,104,0.16899999999999998,0.76,0.071,-0.8892,1,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,6,2,7,6,1,0,1,0,10,0,0,2,0,19,21,12,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,6,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,13,2,5,20,2,9,0,0,2,0,11,3,0,4,7,50,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354835473900717,0.0,0.0,0.11072666829999224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385111305530235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701388145816779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022612657204766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16157881192498094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07954813130833714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13673209618325485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.341715156454072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22576487972845435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297505433372128,0.0,0.679448463563501,0.18394604456950864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16103821174512706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20866353062073206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603847719511448,0.0,0.13060849356543727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765769020704747,0.11853863001150315,0.16535681784136727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485404186833716
mentalhealth,unstablemayble,2020/02/03,"I spend every day ‘knowing’ I’ll suddenly die I didn’t know where to write this, I need it off my chest, I’m not seeking advice or pity. I just don’t like keeping this in anymore. 

Everyone around me knows I’m extremely dramatic, it’s not on purpose but when something tiny happens to me it really can feel like the world is crashing down on me. 

I’ve been to the doctors a lot about my anxiety and I am on medication, I don’t even know if this is anxiety,  I’ve never experienced this before. For the past few months I get this random overwhelming feeling that I’m going to drop dead, it feels like I’m falling into my own body it’s the strangest feeling. I know how irrational it is but every single time I ‘know’ I’m about to die. I’ve developed this fear of fainting, I used to pass out a lot when I was quite young, I know it’s not a very scary experience and that I’ll be completely fine even if it does happen but it scares me so much now. 

It’s like my head is playing some sick joke that I always fall for “no this time you really are about to die” and plays out every possible way it could happen.  I don’t experience anxiety in a way I’m familiar with anymore, the other physical symptoms are so much stronger than the mental ones. I get hot and dizzy and nauseous and weak and it’s like someone’s punched me with all these symptoms and they come out of no where, they usually last less than a minute before it all goes away and I realise for the 10th time today I’m not about to die. 

I don’t think I’d be taken seriously if I told anyone since I am just so over the top about these things and people just assume I’m exaggerating. To me I never exaggerate, the pain I feel is as strong as I describe it, the worries I have really are as ridiculous as they are I feel them as real as I describe.",3.2795716671578745,4.211535546419103,4.94202770409667,84.50025837508598,72.84615384615384,8.237705079084389,26.960310443069066,8.626192665926032,1.7830291580705369,1419,49,305,25,27,482,178,377,0.187,0.695,0.11900000000000001,-0.9842,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,4,3,20,18,1,3,15,0,23,11,3,2,4,62,57,29,5,5,14,0,7,5,0,0,8,0,0,0,28,18,0,1,15,3,1,5,13,8,0,1,5,8,40,10,43,49,11,42,0,2,0,0,7,18,0,9,21,200,68,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365338829158883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123121652777012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19646552704418735,0.0,0.1697966955092698,0.05985784578418976,0.0,0.0,0.07620766795144625,0.0,0.0,0.08042984328809293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568914274324335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508919014165763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374216157971568,0.08975647242508179,0.0,0.0,0.06834958520369258,0.0,0.0,0.055208917253300994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35538288228267,0.0,0.0,0.08762157358575004,0.07491456288658767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308417602585827,0.0,0.21638074808311136,0.08180039308430616,0.0,0.16747858112567685,0.0,0.096330775424536,0.2597104026965864,0.12231417338471305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945141291844952,0.0,0.048651976500220524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271038409651711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878566590309423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609072430979369,0.0,0.0,0.3293285027267037,0.06978047905808889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20911432697026064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455586605983413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623924070449875,0.08627091524054961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833005245269859,0.0,0.12586081458391793,0.06347591290686387,0.13204955845345318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05800897691747345,0.0,0.09109103294377699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817208048542367,0.0593485605525338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650812841722667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910527316331535,0.0,0.09743859767210483,0.1645245722031364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570674075317294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081433362603634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253385582199944,0.06590383543181683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779552405516707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05687295569519625,0.054852996608883986,0.0,0.0,0.1497529916932621,0.0,0.08114466833767002,0.08180039308430616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393627133394194,0.0942831354211112,0.07063408076160567,0.0,0.135900434521913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693725196085772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ecleveland4,2020/02/03,"How do I tell my parents I need help? For the past few years, I have struggled with some strong feelings of sadness for prolonged periods of time (6-8 months). I don’t like to call it depression because one of my best friends is diagnosed and I have seen her in far worse states than I have ever been. Recently, though, I have started to have suicidal thoughts, along with random lack of control in what I actually do and say to people (usually late at night). I have great supportive friends, but I feel like I should get professional help before I do anything to myself.

My problem is that I would need to tell my parents my situation in order for that to happen.   However, thinking of that makes me very nervous. I feel like they would worry too much about me or be too protective. Or they could go the opposite way and think that I am too weak. For reference, I am a closeted bisexual and would rather come out to my parents than tell them I am sad. Does anyone have any tips of getting over this speed bump? Thanks",5.297735259664194,6.15415037055838,5.713908629441626,81.08734869191727,68.13705583756345,9.310269426005467,32.412729402577106,9.466822959209583,2.8627332292073397,801,34,157,16,13,257,122,197,0.145,0.7140000000000001,0.141,-0.4214,4,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,3,3,8,17,0,2,3,0,23,2,0,3,1,35,41,9,1,10,4,3,3,3,2,4,2,1,1,0,7,9,0,2,7,0,0,2,1,7,0,1,3,5,30,10,29,32,5,24,0,3,1,0,16,7,0,4,15,112,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.11379495120655013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929908611300962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815367188126173,0.0,0.09596044195178123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108463128104593,0.0,0.09922688087318957,0.0,0.1223754442323314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907227930630318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004495536815326,0.0,0.0,0.13078850453672464,0.09310393377344872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043638611854776,0.11835712431371215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204656664519017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548080331868513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17688520026038398,0.1666130184173995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18018584647954414,0.0,0.12184826578656115,0.0,0.06627239045452465,0.0,0.0,0.1285634025926958,0.0,0.0,0.10311821159754847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15632301645950525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315416358906554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17090988679416266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783836258344398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930773267947884,0.0,0.08572207798168417,0.17293030159224942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943098220789453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901824025843808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38844622316838656,0.0,0.11131784312058607,0.08084298441264133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158042585118094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151387243359894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927332884549496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310750007929239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253745731019553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190653254367854,0.0,0.1275528756921452,0.1323281256758462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057679475069537,0.10735921003008288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14943850056526273,0.11456914814571582,0.0925756500375704,0.06799647517700927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284299059027208,0.09621581108032357,0.0,0.09255992569525882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184235445597413,0.11883598294135532,0.2485100955058332,0.0,0.0,0.075093288934577
mentalhealth,MoosiMossi,2020/02/03,"What should I do/say? this pass week has been a complete disaster: I told my teachers about how I was feeling lately (told them about feeling less motivated to do work because of being laughed at behind my back and in front of my face by everyone in school for no reason other than the fact that I'm ugly and that a picture of me at my lowest point at a social gathering is somewhere online.) the teacher told the counselor, counselor asked how did I know the picture was there; told them that I saw two people who looked at it publicly and gave their names. Conselor called my parents saying that she didn't understand what was going on according to my claim and ask them to talk to me about it. Parents got mad because this isn't the first time conselor called about school and we got into a heated argument, resulting in me saying sensitive things that I thought about, one parent suggesting I be in special ed, the other refusing to help me with school and threatening me with mental institution and refused to speak with me after the fact. after that, no one talks to each other anymore at home, avoiding me at every turn. I thought about moving away with one parent but asking that one parent would just lead into a argument. I don't know what to do, I'm feeling suicidal and feel like I have no choice or control over every day decisions in fear ill anger one parent or get glared at by another. No one won't believe my story either since they think I'm being ""paranoid "". what should I do?",10.080520833333333,7.322858788194448,9.380416666666667,70.55625000000003,60.07638888888889,11.961111111111116,39.625,9.928628108626363,3.876758333333333,1193,45,214,17,12,381,153,288,0.17,0.78,0.049,-0.9890000000000001,7,2,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,0,5,5,11,7,2,2,12,0,21,2,1,7,2,48,49,13,1,3,5,6,4,1,0,4,1,3,1,0,20,16,0,4,13,0,0,5,8,4,0,8,16,9,32,3,45,26,3,31,0,0,2,0,37,18,0,2,9,161,52,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601091417862082,0.0,0.0,0.08134727920188327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300483778003037,0.0,0.07706568020651522,0.06307256506267715,0.0,0.1000039965747256,0.0,0.0,0.09241467699528984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16751446265245515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860022016404984,0.0,0.09199860028810188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052899677379089655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13822008392986873,0.0783789036069854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230151930448892,0.1658982787340866,0.05859905095815372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977086907725039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042854950974489416,0.0,0.046616995745607286,0.0,0.13120660993352776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05497997992266267,0.0,0.08227828883765359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901581660184725,0.0,0.0925283642045878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04007352790969956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888078176610943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266243589754506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718015119821129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334957086674537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5464778260945191,0.0,0.0,0.05686617058143247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754063346758705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433590032478668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19568996758975732,0.0,0.24904262921325426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785236133948203,0.0,0.0,0.08361469231849837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972261031629568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185801874111394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05449411358798669,0.0525586439337889,0.0,0.1302382079279172,0.047829742858272295,0.0,0.0,0.3135156144279416,0.0,0.0,0.08922021622949293,0.08012701847823803,0.08539146359454731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579592789994071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059715558618605336,0.0,0.0,0.0582685790441659,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ps4gal94,2020/02/03,What makes someone emotionally unstable? Mood swings? Impulsiveness? Anxiety and overthinking? Depression and self doubt?,12.098,14.319756133333346,9.180000000000003,34.59000000000003,121.0,17.2,49.66666666666666,9.3871,11.675266666666667,102,7,8,6,5,30,14,15,0.508,0.4920000000000001,0.0,-0.885,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3475766691664454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3913311725026125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5110828355121609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.303282295118715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4739863620303143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849694608673941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,owopup,2020/02/03,"Things are getting way better Before my Christmas break, I was extremely confident in myself, but some big tramazing events happened to me, and it really knocked me off my train. I felt weak, anxious and just overall exhausted 


But after many weeks, I'm starting to gain back my confidence! I'm still tired because I'm overworking myself, but I'm gaining my trust in myself. I've been talking and reflecting with myself, my therapist,my amazing boyfriend and everyone else in my support system. I'm learning that just because I'm sensitive doesnt mean I'm weak. I am strong 

Thanks❤",6.825119047619048,7.924185453703707,6.925291005291008,72.8916666666667,64.83333333333333,10.245502645502649,38.57671957671958,10.290406445055957,4.376694179894181,471,25,76,11,7,151,71,108,0.131,0.605,0.264,0.9617,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,4,4,8,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,15,18,7,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,1,15,5,8,15,1,14,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,6,43,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262445934252678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786332473910905,0.0,0.2832299374930872,0.0,0.1976800242251603,0.0,0.0,0.20546069333195446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19406649608257853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22198364795146286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22305552578071502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213732000871012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205432342398322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23552745578665726,0.0,0.253055389748817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488247319205648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644313155566604,0.0,0.18552430929607067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636244015641453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18672322949664324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697316227787209,0.15433747564012307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670079600540715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18439810052178707,0.18634631799415172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,catsmol,2020/02/03,"Do I have depression? I find myself writing this as I am unable to sleep at nearly 4am and I need to wake for uni in about 3 hours, laying in bed with suicidal thoughts. I wasn’t sure if it was a normal thing but I realise I’m very unhappy with life in general. I’ve talked to a few people but not spoken to a doctor yet and this is actually my first ever Reddit post.

I was wondering what signs made you think you have depression or some other mental health issue, and how to distinguish between just a long-term depressed feeling and unhappiness with life and genuine depression.

Basically I’m wondering if I need to speak with a doctor or someone because I find it really extremely difficult to talk to either a parent or loved one about this (yet I’m able to talk to people online about it), as I frequently find myself crying for hours and having a headache because I don’t enjoy life or want to live anymore. I tried writing a list of everything that made me feel this way and showed a few people but it did t help.

P.S I’ve probably done a lot of things wrong with this post and I hope it’s the right place to post but I’m new so please go easy.

Thanks for reading",3.994411764705884,5.086412474789917,5.338907563025213,81.72079831932774,71.31092436974791,8.625210084033615,27.02521008403361,9.007467420416297,2.0768084033613445,931,31,185,18,17,312,134,238,0.159,0.7090000000000001,0.132,-0.8694,2,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,2,0,1,9,11,0,0,11,0,12,9,2,3,2,52,31,22,1,7,13,1,2,0,0,0,6,1,1,0,15,13,0,0,10,2,0,1,3,6,0,2,8,3,19,5,33,23,5,20,0,4,0,1,11,7,0,11,8,122,34,3,0.10054098578377436,0.0,0.09811349891340423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09970964172871204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12257770349219485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104395518424916,0.0,0.0,0.3463832149256608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20581591847208006,0.0,0.10288833554147994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094507772148963,0.0,0.0,0.09035975510226876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167308666177756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756779186585083,0.08552011114629207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057139759188845576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687036637969964,0.0,0.0,0.06739050345784106,0.0,0.0,0.09985988458846833,0.19802523711539516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493866779009267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21304521482782185,0.0,0.0,0.08877953244332146,0.08897560857832681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854763507336894,0.09074216505202032,0.1902686234558857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013216661778164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909973401692722,0.0,0.09710311058050676,0.0,0.0,0.09850881919556127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812917398824919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163886648939993,0.0,0.0,0.2091073807552935,0.0,0.1050439310860436,0.11036381049919958,0.0,0.0,0.2888714168562513,0.0,0.10840018761183644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005681936024028,0.0,0.06440912999216274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586145251273007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061359528129538,0.0,0.08518805098676117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997551998513028,0.0,0.09475868924751504,0.0,0.0,0.2424331078444335,0.0,0.09256463160225133,0.0,0.0,0.1335899269279088,0.06442260402316828,0.0,0.07981831217522449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826072966354574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829568427754487,0.05930167834238891,0.07980475471748191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180648205823796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992578476619187,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lax_Liam,2020/02/03,"Is it bad that I do this? I tend to judge people by their looks only, and personality second.

When in class, for example, I will only go out of my way to talk to people who are more attractive than me. I will still be nice to the others, and talk to them, but I would never go out of my way to talk to them, and I view them as almost inferior, while I view the other more attractive person as superior.

This creates a weird loop for me. As I will be unable to talk to the attractive person, because I view them in such a superior position, and I see my own self as inferior in this case. While I dont want to talk to those who I think are inferior (uglier than me), because I view them with such inferiority.

I currently struggle with BDD, and due to this, I think I am able to overly judge everyone else (and thats what I think causes me to do this), just as I judge myself so harshly.

But I was wondering if anyone else does it as well, as I know it is such an awful thing to do.",7.2365474254742574,4.46925664390244,8.71967479674797,73.11653116531167,65.48780487804879,12.037940379403794,32.53387533875339,10.504223727775694,2.95081029810298,752,20,167,15,9,268,98,205,0.114,0.759,0.127,0.7014,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,6,0,8,14,0,1,6,1,16,0,0,1,1,24,27,20,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,17,10,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,7,1,1,1,6,34,7,37,20,3,17,0,4,6,0,17,6,0,3,7,134,51,1,0.133972462548822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415406896052515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367666082904624,0.13727062001441948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118614101947672,0.16333673936464355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376266234509049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172402048009674,0.0,0.15701472833238278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238336029772517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801642922915174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15227927572621305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362776173425102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250312671411128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332782225798648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203784189597506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18575927365031475,0.3509387602165644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675870717821212,0.0,0.1397624967468212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699058165077414,0.0,0.0,0.14005710639624264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5384099530502866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890053511149155,0.25753243329103226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902042951810946,0.21268220973284355,0.0,0.0,0.1204573332773296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528742075156378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517019353694936,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EffervescentFlower,2020/02/03,"Does Anyone Just Hate Themselves? I hate how I look, how I talk, my body, I get straight A’s but I still feel dumber than everyone else. I hate my smile and my voice and my laugh. I hate my jawline and my face and my hair and my head shape. I hate everything about me. I just wish I could erase everything and make myself better. 
I don’t know why I feel like this. I just want to feel better. I want to love myself but I’m terrified if I talk to anyone they’ll lie to make me feel better or confirm everything I think about myself.",-0.3705952380952375,1.8660657500000009,1.439857142857143,98.0384761904762,92.39285714285714,4.772380952380952,15.502380952380953,6.42735559955562,-0.4941626190476183,412,9,95,5,15,134,58,112,0.205,0.531,0.263,0.7227,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,3,8,11,5,0,1,0,3,5,4,4,0,27,23,12,0,5,7,0,5,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,7,30,6,7,21,0,3,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,2,2,57,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787243700717642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33747529624197564,0.0,0.14128261518561738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015531642455266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130734570708788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106253329520141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12153824678646903,0.34293827508523445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572501657249113,0.0908666182997005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645302967845194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6278831768299558,0.1305365891840188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990188001552991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062140016006289815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680998416502743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479653940045614,0.0,0.16980446904153473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10157639761395973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044656366066352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150006115443642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15004331118708875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477178987210275,0.0,0.1462655338956661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alpacaporkchop8,2020/02/03,"I'm proud of you 💖 No matter who you are, what you've done, or what condition you are in I am proud of you ❤️ if you are reading this it means you are still alive, congratulations ⭐ Thank you to the people who support others and thank you to the ones who are brave enough to talk about their problems. You are loved. I hope you all have a great year 💖🌻",-0.3307936507936482,1.7404103506493518,1.385627705627705,100.36669552669552,88.35064935064932,4.461183261183262,15.049062049062044,5.82211442006289,-1.0299656565656563,275,5,69,2,9,89,50,77,0.052000000000000005,0.57,0.37799999999999995,0.9833,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,10,1,2,2,10,0,0,3,0,9,1,0,0,1,8,16,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,13,9,7,15,2,3,0,0,0,1,16,1,0,3,2,48,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25950635507406394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26202195809587936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795792812843521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25186795501442083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288711191628262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27622931847467197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718363264684121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17580449041609647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426473991490908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25365446161407457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025139775454138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877662034767925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038226906703878,0.0,0.4669355380171258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633009653308601
mentalhealth,kristoffh,2020/02/03,"I might be dying and the one person I ever loved can never know I am highly suspicious that I have cancer. My symptoms present almost text book with what cancer I think I might have. I know it is irresponsible of me to claim I do without any professional training or seeing a physician but I have no insurance or live in the country I have citizenship in. I am not making this post to seek advice on seeing a doctor or for pity but rather to vent my pain I am currently experiencing. I lost the man I loved 7 months ago and I will never hear from him again due to solely myself. I relied on him in every time of need and now that I realize that I may be leaving this world sooner than planned; I now have to face this revelation alone. I'm not sure if I am terrified or thankful this is happening either. The symptoms could get very bad (if my guess is correct) but also finally being free from all the pain I experience with my mental health sounds blissful. I want to reach out so badly just to hear his voice, even if it is just once, but I would never burden him with this pain and fear of me dying. If someone could offer any advice or coping strategies on how to be okay with keeping this to myself I would be very thankful.",6.622636022514072,5.844320719512197,7.379430894308946,75.85978424015013,65.3821138211382,9.683051907442152,30.711694809255786,8.841846274778883,2.341458786741714,971,29,188,13,13,325,137,246,0.196,0.677,0.126,-0.9634,1,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,11,16,0,1,7,1,28,13,1,2,7,54,48,20,2,11,20,0,0,0,0,6,10,4,0,2,12,9,0,1,4,1,1,0,7,9,0,1,1,7,36,8,28,34,2,24,0,2,2,2,11,9,0,14,14,148,48,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208585375177918,0.09460731665049237,0.0,0.1068719795974652,0.11053730108873998,0.0,0.08534978754226387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451564549692516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782256839573992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704261377109189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22153218580446304,0.0,0.0,0.10923991946600503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049237862553819,0.09654095795775686,0.0899223578824092,0.0,0.0,0.10439978401292438,0.0,0.12009789049469342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691454623978485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055760612047036785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757215940425815,0.0,0.0943786036634642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344613481104035,0.24057885970519266,0.0,0.0,0.11276325785563215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486413283341974,0.0,0.0,0.1173090717387824,0.0,0.0,0.11300880617701628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942421659737037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650546134413516,0.0,0.19265112001136764,0.0,0.07124130508340322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755602127954543,0.22644161003578345,0.0,0.0,0.08518871690584005,0.0,0.0,0.07913694459265745,0.24694403228549255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11366109701313595,0.07232118424087193,0.0,0.3406961332341918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319016638215773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221525638921344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17009568869295946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042969949403712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005892222423696,0.2218610708627992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19652032703198452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683865478192923,0.0,0.0,0.06223355003759694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17612240863037792,0.06295052991443215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288131380075807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15163203115308402,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DruidicDuelist,2020/02/03,"Is this method of treatment normal? Sorry about how long this'll be, I just needed to get this all out of me.

Location wise: Toronto, Canada.
So, in my final year of university study, I managed to build up the courage to go see a therapist (one at my university) for issues I had been dealing with since high school-I had a disastrous time trying to focus on anything, and if it was even slightly difficult I would begin to feel freaked out and I would defocus. Even when it was something I enjoyed and was passionate about I'd still have trouble keeping on top of things, though less so.

 I had a few appointments with them before they got me to meet with a psychologist for a few meetings. After these meetings, as well as a few tests and going over my educational history, he diagnosed me with ADHD, non-hyperactive, as well as anxiety and depression largely aggravated by the inability to focus and gave me documents to see a psychiatrist, to pass on to my family doctor. Apparently, after asking around at ten different psychs, six were fully booked, two never responded, and of the two remaining, one was well over an hour by bus for me to get to, while the other was much closer.

After a couple months waiting, I began to see this psychiatrist-I had been prescribed a very low dose of Concerta for the ADHD beforehand, which the psych agreed with. The psych also noted the severe anxiety, though continued to only prescribe ADHD meds, switching over to vyvanse, to see if it might help better. Whenever she asks me of my progress on looking into jobs and careers in my field of study, I admit that in the past month I hadn't made too much progress (this has been for the past couple of months now that I've been trying to search), as I tend to get anxious and overwhelmed-though when I brought up the idea of seeking a guidance counselor to help point me in the right direction, she said I shouldn't be looking for outs, and can't expect others to do the work for me. I don't tend to speak up much, so when I wanted to reply that I only wanted help figuring out an idea of where to go and what to look for, as I have never done this before and doing it from scratch was very overwhelming for me, I just...nodded. 

When I bring up my anxiety, she tends to say that it is largely a symptom of my ADHD, and if I only try harder I can break past it and that the medication is giving me the tools to do so, I just need to apply them, and that perhaps mindfulness can aid in this. Additionally, she has suggested that perhaps I should stop looking for jobs and careers in my field, and look for less intensive jobs elsewhere, perhaps at local community centres and such-in this case she described another patient of hers who wanted to be an actress, but her acting teacher told her straight up that she wasn't spectacularly beautiful enough to cut it in modern hollywood, and found her satisfaction in a desk job as an accountant. The psych also said directly that she probably knows more than I do about my field, as she apparently has two siblings in jobs in that field, and maybe also because my focus problems through university might have detracted from my overall knowledge? (I am guessing about this second one, as the sibling thing was the only reason she said she probably knew more about it than I did).

Overall after these months, she has mentioned that without any further progress on my part, she has nothing else to offer in terms of aid, and doesn't seem to want to continue our monthly meetings unless I make more tangible progress on finding a job and breaking past my anxiety. However, while my focus has been getting better slightly, I still struggle a lot with anxiety-and it feels more like the anxiety is the more major roadblock at this point rather than my ADHD, as I can't just ignore my anxiety to work past it. The ADHD meds may have given me tools, but it feels like I've been given a kids toy scoop and pail and asked to build an award winning sand sculpture. Hell, even in my social life, my anxiety crops up; when a friend of mine made a joke at the expense of my character in a tabletop game, I fixated on that for the rest of the night and got increasingly paranoid that no one actually liked me being there at the table, and just accepted that I was there. When I asked him about it later that night (albeit 'just wondering' what he thought of the character, nothing more direct) and he admitted he really liked them and apologized if I was hurt, I just said that it was cool and was good to hear, but in reality I was crying so hard because it felt so relieving to know he didn't actually hate me.


TL;DR, To cut an insanely long story short: I am a bit of a paranoid, anxious, critically unfocused individual. I have finally, after years of dealing with ADHD and anxiety and depression, started taking medication for the ADHD, but the anxiety continues unabated, and my psychiatrist seems to believe that if I just work harder at it, I'd be able to find my peace, albeit probably not in a career I initially wanted. From all of this, is this kind of psychiatry normal? Am I just *that* anxious? Or is something wrong here?",12.615880548538435,7.718075461145194,11.892447973054251,61.03268856008664,57.68098159509203,15.14596415253218,46.35161794779262,12.371834555250599,5.5456040178034405,4083,172,727,89,34,1348,396,978,0.095,0.797,0.109,0.9591,10,0,3,0,0,0,114.0,1,0,4,12,48,38,4,2,55,1,70,8,0,5,4,123,139,73,0,21,22,0,7,4,1,7,7,7,0,1,54,46,0,4,22,5,2,8,13,16,3,10,46,24,98,22,157,81,24,114,1,5,9,1,62,56,1,14,52,553,152,22,0.04323453530852511,0.0,0.08438133960884807,0.0,0.4156760775785645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372392679806046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029400966585185345,0.045335179959566166,0.2976687105560519,0.14652815603227673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03557833873776608,0.03848790267836441,0.1616738171208412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05271074287125685,0.0,0.07357881034712699,0.04871051601411805,0.0,0.07647486612629102,0.04720091491043812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567638196975772,0.04749110689903804,0.0,0.08914581496202924,0.07447568381809498,0.04388214325833433,0.0,0.045170887395643136,0.0,0.04425237889239849,0.0,0.04424394033066443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03611690651587366,0.0,0.0,0.044672832293487744,0.0,0.08566800845000136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04075767211377177,0.0,0.06558204031327633,0.061773521326157925,0.04151193397670835,0.09472264028619776,0.07903116402468831,0.0,0.0,0.04740443640257962,0.033402894731464614,0.0,0.09035304103626328,0.041474505841481116,0.07371354826827597,0.036263076968156734,0.06915721487238423,0.0,0.0476277149469504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03872965150825772,0.042685152743676937,0.0,0.0,0.048728463483023766,0.0,0.0869375930172405,0.045679660294161456,0.0,0.0,0.04257730834496301,0.0,0.04628346424570423,0.09761305567520023,0.0,0.04512562217718518,0.25742163057283884,0.03842884148911972,0.0,0.04502211541428593,0.04752113984957335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030537830885522206,0.0844888403640524,0.0,0.0,0.07652240647312199,0.1815306038159962,0.0,0.0,0.03675645583769447,0.0,0.08181912535251397,0.028859388040109176,0.0,0.04343490183392692,0.0,0.09604764439894277,0.08710849163907003,0.0,0.09173001933076848,0.043654555881013024,0.0,0.17254696800868904,0.0,0.09534707424346996,0.0641157202169273,0.06669027790898367,0.0,0.0,0.08114536519861568,0.08472133008266045,0.08296940534079053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718736017449988,0.13152724929963627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04681878856442353,0.20636128020814093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174122100670791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984242452626816,0.04136961133872537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027697150402188987,0.04445230299885117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03692205692399292,0.16450377474948866,0.034381837784521856,0.0,0.0437556579139068,0.13780930818695294,0.07871819433859037,0.0,0.04884271867742557,0.0,0.03576405438057223,0.0,0.0,0.044072164093625035,0.0,0.066568115057576,0.0,0.048397522614353664,0.030601626618306076,0.0,0.06905431149142831,0.03614600743226706,0.0,0.045198123528494144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04493723639346485,0.032506989947703555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05019862779471543,0.057446208306026626,0.0,0.12743313428070094,0.03432339169051137,0.025210405221323944,0.0,0.0,0.041312451262602634,0.0,0.08806023445516685,0.0,0.12670157631822945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713460390327249,0.12750424546576206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661911850396026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041676549209427836,0.04688600928029489,0.0944257698763098,0.0,0.0,0.0614251468475166,0.04727017728881512,0.0,0.05568324647753936
mentalhealth,laurakrod,2020/02/03,"My best friend of 10 years is gone My furry little guy had to be put down last night. I am experiencing the most painful grief I’ve ever had in my life, I don’t know how I will ever be able to move on or feel whole again. 

And here’s the kicker, I’m a therapist. I’m nervous I won’t be able to keep it together anymore.",1.9279166666666647,2.315679291666669,4.284333333333337,89.994,75.52777777777777,7.426666666666668,22.73333333333333,7.554174236665415,0.6039300000000005,247,6,62,3,5,87,54,72,0.122,0.7759999999999999,0.10300000000000001,-0.0954,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,3,0,10,2,0,1,2,9,16,3,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,3,2,7,2,7,8,3,13,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,2,6,38,8,0,0.43020124426142403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21332201789230568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257348322723924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3891416549205032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087613375998328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618620707802456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21298343398104155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19119131622636504,0.0,0.0,0.11821367655579068,0.1753357161341298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193193069206093,0.0,0.21558733233598693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22861792006103376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20185736255391587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288822276685609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21623553643185012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497484011727589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24015216292287145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851774830126065
mentalhealth,PatrickPlan8,2020/02/03,"An personal article on mental health: How I holdback my darker self I wrote this and was wondering if people could critique it.

https://p8m.in/31i8HuO",6.10125,9.892206625000004,4.941666666666666,70.32000000000002,86.91666666666666,9.066666666666668,31.0,8.841846274778883,4.5519500000000015,125,6,15,4,4,37,23,24,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,6,4,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31834217324126546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4238163181615581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4018118114885919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27641937677792594,0.34814331286591765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159476023835944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4323903459422416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Silence_is_Solace,2020/02/03,"Is life just distracting yourself? I struggle with MDD, have for years and can typically distract myself/cope. 

But I'm at the point where it doesn't work, or more I'm tired of having to distract myself to feel happy. 

So does it get better? Or will my whole life be just distracting myself and pretending to be happy?",4.127704918032791,6.0645411147541,4.836852459016395,82.1142950819672,72.27868852459017,7.50295081967213,25.31475409836065,8.238735603445708,1.6687744262295092,252,8,46,4,5,81,44,61,0.204,0.634,0.161,-0.2774,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,4,8,0,5,1,0,8,3,0,0,0,9,12,6,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,4,3,7,9,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,1,33,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23549967359700616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23302011028540526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13463725508715554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13911833227271111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5669119648360206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3761575309736259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517170913998182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783697148440832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30604533850639337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972878849480837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19385225596685388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17147315235082125
mentalhealth,Elvixlyte,2020/02/03,"How do I get over chronic negative emotions and thoughts? I’m having the battle of my life right now. I’ve been chronically depressed since middle school (25 now). I’ve conquered depression many times, and have acquired a lot of mental health tools along the way. 

However, I’m at an all time low. Nothings working. Chronic negative emotions and thoughts are taking over my life. I’ve cried more these last few years than I have my entire life combined. I’ve had a chronic twitchy eye for about 3 years now. I am on empty. I’m trying my hardest to fight, but these negative emotions continue to overpower me more and more daily.",3.931178736517719,6.405511855932204,4.293636363636363,83.38580123266567,74.5084745762712,7.002773497688753,31.066255778120183,8.00094639256281,2.4297864406779657,501,24,88,8,11,157,77,118,0.192,0.8079999999999999,0.0,-0.9559,2,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,5,5,2,0,5,0,8,9,1,1,1,11,15,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,4,1,8,0,12,11,6,17,0,3,1,0,1,7,0,1,9,53,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831513616798704,0.0,0.0,0.2872184666556989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5626657368403344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871125331574659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723227592940802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13591186762434845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3533111149413714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175274860431028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16904385224238005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16803039145438173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15998742246880227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423913958465341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16874545259952567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792551251584784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12536451268008586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647390779479196,0.1944498810946991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320261064596032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13234705548136094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138559167356122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21474467707813646
mentalhealth,cwuwtecactus,2020/02/03,"Deciding how to feel Not sure if this goes here but I am desperately reading help on how to feel, I got hurt by someone I knew, but who I thought I could trust. I instinctively blocked him on everything because I was very upset at the time, I still am upset honestly. I keep going back and forth with my emotions, not sure whether I can forgive him or not since I know I will have to face him eventually. I just want to make a decision on how I feel so I can let it be and stop thinking about it so much... any help on this is much appreciated thank you",3.460789473684212,4.301281000000003,4.872763157894738,85.50809210526316,72.33333333333334,8.50701754385965,29.16228070175439,8.841846274778883,2.0172491228070166,430,17,97,8,8,144,75,114,0.18600000000000005,0.61,0.203,0.5101,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,10,9,0,2,2,0,11,1,1,4,2,33,24,12,0,3,9,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,3,10,1,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,3,20,6,12,16,2,10,0,1,0,0,8,5,0,2,4,71,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343060635690161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186450736789442,0.0,0.1203935313202298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768684685826184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221597444572752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774993281169767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2995842211439029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224320886335916,0.0,0.1579579581167023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26475877610985793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114267186817609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755461478780773,0.0,0.0,0.10854026195051823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019560649190712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183208767805793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.290368916440449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19755240343625427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337317847037042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16734022570812845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772292251023526,0.16511797181560536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722808601161646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818305051646001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654935725220107,0.0,0.15679211133870952,0.115163230312363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629573236302198,0.11649000210403194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,buddyfam,2020/02/03,I feel nothing I don’t feel depressed I don’t feel sad I don’t feel anything. It’s like being bored all the time and I don’t like it. Idk I just hate having to wake up in the morning and do the same thing every single day.,-1.7177310924369742,0.19886490196078727,0.9024089635854368,101.56941176470586,96.05882352941177,2.9142857142857146,15.128851540616246,3.1291,-1.396632492997199,174,4,43,0,7,59,31,51,0.20199999999999999,0.647,0.151,-0.3814,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,3,0,7,1,1,0,1,9,12,2,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,4,6,2,3,11,3,4,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568230849883541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20127192327225069,0.0,0.2688022481285388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629488827318756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6312073585833304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3081237910412492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049423525549769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994583136150243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073384109749994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18198191012988987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eelibuj123,2020/02/03,Why cant i cry Why cant i just fucking cry o need to feel it i need to feel something,-4.549999999999997,-3.5407564545454515,-0.5722727272727255,108.96159090909092,113.54545454545456,2.2,14.590909090909092,3.1291,-1.7490363636363635,66,2,20,0,4,24,13,22,0.0,0.733,0.267,0.6259,0,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6151965304407687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831817456246842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588819260651564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4152753136289152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21557969531255636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5053645071576983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Trooper48,2020/02/03,"New Here Hello, I am new to this community. I suffer from schizophrenia (more specifically schizoaffective disorder). I was told the specific branch I have is pretty rare. I was wondering if anyone here also suffers from schizophrenia or something similar and if you do, what do you do to cope? Sometimes the voice inside my head drives me insane and lead me to break. Also I feel that my disorder is progressively getting worse. Sometimes there are multiple voices which is something that started recently. I have started having nightmares every night and dread going to sleep. Also visual hallucinations have started as well, things out of my nightmares such as shadow men and spectres. I see these things while I'm awake. I want to stop this and learn how to cope better. Any advice is appreciated whether you suffer from the same things or not. Also any questions you have I will try my best to answer them. Thank you in advance.",5.163886363636365,8.092357339393946,5.16642045454546,76.3896306818182,72.57575757575758,7.276515151515152,28.494318181818183,8.278499904357787,2.4330681818181814,751,30,116,13,16,234,102,165,0.131,0.762,0.107,-0.6486,0,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,5,1,5,10,8,0,1,3,0,17,2,2,2,0,22,29,18,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,10,6,0,1,5,0,0,4,1,4,1,0,3,4,22,4,15,25,3,16,0,3,1,0,10,2,0,6,9,92,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13316679944756085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4359177351082408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18534396777263235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528696813955233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301268465840314,0.1205245674632835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31236696028863464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11481795008652446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890496570959782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119830175252954,0.0,0.07744848271715186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985793441534275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26323137123210555,0.0,0.12788528489951936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864113174264328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265970001228416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345555734545255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859389563505717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363738735667456,0.0,0.0,0.209823009324686,0.2695598231763401,0.0,0.2893694097420281,0.0,0.0,0.11393238411439124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546413167708922,0.0,0.0,0.27160607500988904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021703917861174,0.0,0.0925220899887749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037879535017686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225280019226877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477849200613201,0.0,0.0,0.13887633308360536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pissass123_0,2020/02/03,"I have a saviour fantasy and idk how to fix it. 
Ive got the classic hero fantasy. Always wanting to be a saviour and fix broken people. It's especially bad as I'm in a relationship with a girl I love very much and I know why it's shitty but I can't change it. Any ideas?",-0.5807857142857173,1.4248226833333315,2.6995238095238108,90.97500000000002,88.83333333333334,6.095238095238094,21.904761904761905,7.447530270364453,0.8524761904761915,211,8,50,4,7,76,42,60,0.14800000000000002,0.7609999999999999,0.091,-0.2609,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,5,0,4,1,0,1,0,9,9,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,5,2,5,7,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628864488897393,0.0,0.0,0.21484926537220356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637957593881515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3342214320979226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526851756296725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35665652763131034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17363174024821298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851471649424228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232251421590117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21903223180655249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33920010919028265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26068265526211226,0.1863489310175236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850856887177866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CroCopsLeftLeg,2020/02/03,Does depression just fuck your attention span? Because I struggle to concentrate on the simplest of things sometimes. I went to a Brazilian jiu-jitsu class recently and found myself daydreaming when the instructor was demonstrating moves... felt like an idiot when I partnered up with someone and I couldn’t even get in the proper starting position. Even watching movies I struggle to put my phone down sometimes.,8.6104347826087,10.943153811594202,6.893449275362317,70.2193043478261,61.60869565217392,10.157681159420287,41.33623188405797,10.355215969177356,5.067287536231884,339,19,46,8,5,100,56,69,0.20800000000000002,0.758,0.034,-0.9118,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,5,6,2,2,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,8,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,5,0,0,4,2,8,1,9,3,0,12,0,1,1,1,3,5,1,0,5,32,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291707492894853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780023781133964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908110220251973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880308763869794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209355609056934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23907304970737214,0.0,0.2015773703217021,0.11391854175540493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652486489099022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317453519064322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21919358058938268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21529129678233133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847472457628383,0.0,0.4313004835259638,0.0,0.15433205743685655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558920663560347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485817421404254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20212817615523074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,petunia121,2020/02/03,"I dont know whats wrong for the past 3 months ive been feeling off, and I dont know whats wrong. I am also going to add a TW for ED's up front as well.

First, I dont want to self diagnos cuz thats dumb, but my problems are also not important enough for a therapist, ya know? Just want to write gibberish about my problems because idk

It all kinda started in november, im homeschooled and that month I started skipping math and lying to my parents about it. I also skipped a whole week of school , and started getting behind on my lessons. That intense procrasination has effected my school work to this day. But basically, i also started dieting and losing weight, but i dont have an ed but like idk im still in that headspace of ""your a piece of shit, just starve."" but i dont, cuz my parents basically force feed me now, and i always end up binging on food at like 11 pm anyways. But, in december i cried like evryday, and I came to the conclusion that everybody fucking hates me, and that im boring, and ya know, im the friend that ppl just bring along. I'm very insecure I guess. I was also SUPER LONELY cuz i hadnt been around ppl my age like 4 months prior to december. Now im with friends like 4 days a week. 

School just isnt working out, and I keep getting behind on work, i keep procrastinating. I legit started crying when i was trying to write an essay, like tf. and at night a feel like a weight on my chest and its so weird. also, so im not suicidal or anything, but i dont care if i die. if i were to be shot in the head at this instant i wouldnt care, but my hand would be no where near the trigger. I have happy outbursts, but then I just dont feel anything. During the day im fine, but at night i just crumble in a way. I know these arent very serious and its probably just teenage angst but idk im not going into super detail but I also dont know how to explain my emotions - even to myself. It's like my brain is hiding its emotions from itself, and when i cry is when it actually allows itself to look in the mirror and see its mess. During the day, im happy right? But i feel like im lying to myself, but there I am laughing! So, im not. my brain wants me to think i have a problem, i probably just want attention like i dont even know. i feel like shit, but maube im not pretending to be happy, but actually pretending to be sad? i dont know how im feeling, or if its fake, i dont think it is, but then i do. sorry for this mess, and a dumb teenagers ramblings",1.5604809913883668,3.045407761814748,3.7167838689350994,89.35301659315272,78.18714555765595,6.592581390464189,24.04289014912833,7.3871296695380915,0.9406234068473012,1922,65,430,25,45,660,212,529,0.198,0.637,0.165,-0.9499,3,2,0,0,0,0,65.0,0,3,0,10,35,44,6,1,20,0,37,13,7,8,1,102,79,59,2,12,35,2,9,11,2,2,0,0,0,1,25,23,5,2,21,2,0,5,21,21,1,1,7,11,59,23,52,66,4,58,0,3,2,1,11,23,5,7,40,278,84,8,0.0,0.0,0.07827862754827136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22451870164323665,0.03337280587116629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601041272276252,0.03570434189406835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02444927177109639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895468790296234,0.0,0.04587250544458362,0.08178491331771383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216922198809666,0.10346455206943668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041625443585297024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5170649736238954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023149182967047,0.03552350324490941,0.041441958812676094,0.0,0.052981493754784635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167790014559965,0.08595881193610133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03411557534104402,0.048498370439430505,0.0,0.06197419400637856,0.03707890737538984,0.04190921879124623,0.0,0.04558824195729996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04418313547272282,0.0,0.0,0.12808612557499288,0.0,0.03959803422121772,0.0411620546335301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5632013530535799,0.0,0.0,0.07129910437503721,0.0,0.0,0.17633707282665645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21554047219595415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03368035300362817,0.044870239010568365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604071164984944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752766885320323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906967284438591,0.0,0.03828732245465248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648573342307342,0.1151329101722838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03425174281028188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177335172146743,0.03196063121970237,0.0,0.04184106135168365,0.0,0.08233992209093602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04489726833621845,0.1419421250912722,0.0,0.032030048082295565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04387129632356513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04656811217731359,0.0,0.051398768588105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02723048455453629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06618607908307589,0.0946262042096443,0.03183561253189317,0.06434392935306656,0.09768070756169817,0.036061624464587175,0.0,0.0,0.04477879662132783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759661443359422,0.0,0.0,0.02849134781732263,0.08770291202496891,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ClassicAttitude8,2020/02/03,Feeling down Just need someone to talk to. Feeling down as fuck. Disconnected from everyone and just down.,4.073333333333334,7.360604111111115,3.7944444444444434,78.54500000000002,91.22222222222223,6.844444444444445,33.77777777777778,7.793537801064563,3.5193111111111115,86,5,13,2,3,26,13,18,0.163,0.698,0.14,-0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,4,2,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,7,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,10,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4405656027345801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4662547688189293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4262454570390469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418724870932863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3906573147631149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.370585098978656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kittymeal,2020/02/03,"I don’t know where to begin... I’m somewhere in the Philippines. I grew up in an abusive household. My dad was an addict and home life was very unstable. I jumped from one school to another, and did not have problems until I was in college. My dad died when I was 14, and it was my mom who just raised me and my 3 siblings after that. She had depression, but managed to get through it with some help of social workers. I graduated with a SW degree, because she thought being exposed to people in particularly bad situations would help me get through my anxiety. This only made it worse though. After I graduated, I wasn’t able to get out of the house for about a year—fearing the worst of everything. I went through a very alcoholic stage for most of my college years, and never stayed sober when I graduated. I had trouble sleeping, and took strong opiates to calm my nerves every time I went out. My family had me checked, and a psychiatrist gave me anti-depressants and anti-epileptics to help me sleep. The meds doped me out, but I couldn’t function well. I quit medication and found a job. I was—in a way—happy. I found my fiancee now, and have a beautiful 6 month old baby. But every time I drink, I would black out. I would just wake up with a broken nose, broken things, because I had lost all senses when I was drunk. My fiancée told me I had attempted so many times to kill myself. I look happy, but deep down inside, I still can’t wait to die. I hurt my fiancée because of my rage when I was drunk. I am planning to stop my drinking, but is there anyone who can tell me what’s the best intervention to this? Thanks",3.572080745341616,5.074503201863359,4.677920496894412,84.46490559006212,72.88198757763976,7.388024844720497,27.476273291925462,7.9765259561132025,1.663753391304348,1269,47,255,18,25,416,176,322,0.207,0.6729999999999999,0.12,-0.9839,1,0,3,0,0,1,43.0,0,0,0,7,14,15,2,0,15,0,26,12,4,1,2,41,45,22,3,5,8,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,0,10,17,5,2,4,4,1,5,6,9,1,1,24,3,51,6,40,16,5,38,0,3,2,0,15,13,0,2,18,178,61,9,0.10094285283762892,0.11960077431514315,0.0,0.11004260931770478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787721100159953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584738256972892,0.07722100612804794,0.0,0.0,0.07058158974230214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428306573364032,0.1846014785163961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593329637397422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388386247207716,0.0,0.2095254888485944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977711328708844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700974142904924,0.0,0.090720927297736,0.0,0.09515993797147504,0.11358877322592033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22135725588302024,0.0,0.0,0.15821542303515926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149110877407549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029795994191375,0.0,0.10125391177328633,0.0,0.0,0.11647449932777308,0.1080614117124221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001702057036364,0.0,0.11167831073694053,0.0,0.05547555203589752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129892219403214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476657327648346,0.0,0.11019104809992422,0.0,0.0,0.09551456805103888,0.0,0.10234020917011576,0.0,0.0,0.11212475356537073,0.10168930450718468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822304924407775,0.08057162208400448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785335103786459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592254363755042,0.0,0.06840148950434212,0.07677158824217414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998106426712628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658867753555872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736514929417397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021595561533931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346399592923613,0.20203150511746026,0.10289852643475512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759165025097477,0.08061309266932913,0.08439274489400418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08822850261642677,0.09293461679289912,0.0,0.0,0.06706194607776436,0.0,0.09917584039811296,0.0801373497269995,0.17658176775162207,0.0,0.0,0.09645522169727876,0.11215122367184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657685036360256,0.0,0.08012373807946001,0.0,0.0,0.09075974745030628,0.18715007176729845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286939083072376,0.2151207193917496,0.0,0.0,0.13000777537200325
mentalhealth,hillockdude,2020/02/03,"how do i know how bad my pain is since all I can do is decribe my pain to other people (emotional and phyical), how do I know if my pain is serious or if im just over reacting. I have anxiety but it tends to only have the symptoms of dissyness, nausa, heart plapatations, racing mind, and shortness of breath. that might sound like a lot but they rarely happen all at once and I never can tell if my anxiety is a normal amount or if im going through something.

I don't want to have my anxiety hold me back from doing homework and school work and other stuff but it frequently clouds my mind and common techniques to lower it such as positive thinking and breathing and mindfulness and phyical movment don't do nearly enough.

I cant tell what type of anxiety problem I have if I have one because it isn't hard hitting enough to be panic attacks (I think but I could just be pushing through the panic attacks) but it isn't consistent enough to be any other type of disorder.

I need a way to be able to compare my pain and anxiety so I know when to push my self and when to not. how to I get a reference for the amount of pain and anxiety im in?",4.505512820512823,4.942514594017098,5.8743418803418805,80.73176923076923,69.72649572649573,9.487863247863249,31.41196581196581,9.558583805096642,2.797978119658119,901,37,183,19,15,305,116,234,0.217,0.7440000000000001,0.038,-0.9904,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,1,13,13,2,2,7,0,27,9,3,5,3,52,39,32,0,10,15,0,1,1,0,1,6,1,1,1,11,12,0,1,6,0,0,3,7,12,0,1,0,2,24,1,25,32,8,15,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,9,7,138,35,5,0.0906359674302905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163556589235431,0.0,0.4160176020157199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20622299517010148,0.0,0.06969346432950746,0.07567724693740381,0.05525084449287019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236544487729403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387667100707997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195326409137563,0.0,0.2809535486303468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04735355212072607,0.0,0.05151050899732317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014908666872675,0.0,0.08119202409923386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740405780006287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937071941044379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14943347209309266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044280155486887435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705545833636568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615043836037326,0.27454946908392736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720542140538716,0.0699040456123948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880400424367202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652434727528167,0.0614172772080387,0.06893273744384906,0.4822152982833717,0.21268355833864835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283556768357837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672638017601493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172843786281644,0.0,0.0,0.09455308099979648,0.0,0.0,0.07497500886458038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977599580056773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10375649824246112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420547405218052,0.0,0.0,0.15843966095209866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615173641873518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053459441887327694,0.07194261218914094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598406375841366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,johani12,2020/02/03,"Anxiety medication Hello guys I am wondering if any of you have ever taken propranolol for anxiety?. And how it has helped or affected you? 
I am a little skeptical about taking medication due to it lowers your blood pressure. But my fear is that what if my blood pressure is normal and I’m experiencing some anxiety and I take this pills how  bad would affect me or it would won’t be that bad? I have never taken any kind of anxiety medications so I’m a little scared.",2.4775824175824184,5.113388021978025,5.2051538461538485,73.95234615384616,80.86813186813185,8.914725274725274,24.48461538461539,9.3871,2.8219046153846152,374,14,66,12,10,133,59,91,0.287,0.713,0.0,-0.9726,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,0,5,8,1,4,2,0,11,6,2,4,2,19,18,11,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,2,1,10,1,5,12,1,5,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,6,3,49,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21567960627610466,0.0,0.4852529071899054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26481526675726524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14344464258415282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844653027640522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15701908123918146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062927969744528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651366137595527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178775383367702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4792578449483707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230663267633285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15537468013571532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15876619326794705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23846477199408705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719731899312324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253012915262421,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,livelovekg,2020/02/03,"I have never been mentally stable Hi

I have a decent life and a lot of good things in it. But when I think about it I have never truly been happy or totally okay. I have seen lots of therapists and tried so many ways to become happier. But at the end of the day I am very depressed. Some of it stems from a lot of negativity and issues within my family and a lot of it is from self hatred and low self esteem. I feel like I have tried all I can think of and I feel so very lost. I want to enjoy life while I am young and build real relationships but my depression gets in the way of all of that.",2.6444704861111106,3.2954912421875022,4.798854166666668,85.98850694444445,74.078125,8.188888888888886,20.47222222222221,8.515128840125781,0.8149868055555558,461,8,106,8,9,161,72,128,0.161,0.753,0.086,-0.8661,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,9,0,0,7,1,11,2,0,0,5,27,19,15,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,6,7,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,3,14,5,18,15,8,14,0,4,1,0,4,5,0,6,8,82,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15926068239503774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299888763132168,0.0,0.2484033506743872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12772089456598018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359415825368908,0.0,0.1458265545899111,0.10301852157445453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534002034760473,0.0,0.0,0.1209504815914793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350658057890051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505102763132435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20370942904853045,0.07045021262337453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741440967093312,0.4903843144991746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619902333177526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532252308982646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22243620522451152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16413437623285093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15481985950595314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30086997605974564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16743058545014775,0.09580194430714817,0.1847986854901003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19580849460667266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379648530164756,0.08505455787761303,0.22892296875094945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GlassNailGun,2020/02/04,"There's no problems but my brain has enough anxiety for 20 people. I took a short break just staying at home a couple days, and that was obviously a mistake. The moment I went to a public place it was like walking into a hurricane. It was so hard to keep my jaw from shaking. Eventually it became numb. Every time I lost concentration I could feel my body getting ready to flail around like a drug addict in withdrawal. This is the worst it's ever been. I can only imagine what drinking a coffee would be like. This feels more like a medical condition than a simple problem of anxiety.",2.66019174041298,5.253031,4.268340707964601,81.23283554572272,79.70796460176993,6.952507374631269,25.34587020648968,8.07648339933343,1.9047764011799408,465,18,83,9,12,155,85,113,0.237,0.627,0.136,-0.8968,0,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,5,11,0,1,11,0,10,8,3,0,2,16,17,3,0,5,2,0,3,4,0,1,4,0,1,0,8,3,1,1,3,1,0,4,1,7,0,0,7,3,8,4,11,7,3,16,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,8,58,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18614686203223374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612524014621909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200709683030586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18966899423542866,0.0,0.19061772867698484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363330265267849,0.18893584797263802,0.0,0.110122084252279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727373156968572,0.1980202140904838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17643433576694909,0.0,0.0,0.15445660107021064,0.14386745328147044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726765183948419,0.12198655920854777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921182048088368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529618783392204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17127999837471525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177383600579547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.333686754657023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863979594360972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17201650391260942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298659704010872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11837919507517315,0.0,0.1784013930725352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32677667937113897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820008467562416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956792241015636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18971377077505694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829049676571488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129861066598135,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwout9753,2020/02/04,"RAPID mood changes I’m a 25 year Old male for the record. 

Every single day, I’ll be sitting at work, or wherever, thinking. I’m always thinking. My thoughts alternate between “Wow, I’m doing great, my life is headed down a great path” (it feels like a warm blanket is wrapped around me and everything is great) and “oh my god I’m worthless and I don’t know what I’m doing with my life” (existential panic).

When I say my thoughts alternate, I mean in seconds to minutes, not days or even hours. 

I’m on medication for anxiety already (lexapro) and ADHD (adderall, which I genuinely need), I Exercise heavily, eat healthy, I don’t drink or anything. 

I can’t seem to figure out what is causing these feelings. Have you experienced something similar before? What did you do? Its so stressful to be constantly on edge going between panic and relaxation all day.",2.9936792108147614,5.6535808633540405,4.227753014249179,81.61986846912677,78.87577639751552,7.2664961636828656,31.83083668249909,8.313332769828598,2.8742587504567045,673,36,119,14,17,220,106,161,0.073,0.777,0.15,0.9156,0,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,0,1,4,12,0,3,4,0,14,7,1,1,1,25,31,10,0,1,4,0,3,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,7,8,2,0,10,3,0,1,4,4,0,1,3,5,15,7,15,26,2,17,0,1,0,0,4,7,0,4,9,70,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607518116525938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524939485875377,0.0,0.11498352697220267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571347942272988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137169901304547,0.12301666138142675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758785186298168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14195719220806605,0.1461846330026623,0.0,0.0,0.14933218901248668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673595792215413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353716795044608,0.0,0.14140087304540114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127190323310937,0.0,0.11642939147698,0.0,0.1241945082300189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974405955279656,0.0987215699803527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853545292158724,0.0,0.0,0.4570584363643571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14182080576194547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360873926276383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594453792646642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952126117529044,0.06751170070522364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15052729682499535,0.0,0.1392099214779258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246468752876224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500511193371127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32426780298304914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989268320893104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580121003776182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10638391155360408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582939435029404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770906443139249,0.0,0.21941175066560667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060254565030996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898857303020337
mentalhealth,suicidalhoney,2020/02/04,"I miss my dad... Nothing happened to him or anything, I just really miss him. He is the calmest person I know, he has this pleasantly soothing voice that can make anything better. I've never heard him yell or watch him get angry out of spite, and he's just who I've always wanted to be.
I miss his blanket of calm. I miss having someone who actually cares about me and my mental health enough to check in. I miss being loved by him just as I am, regardless of what I do or what other people will see of me. I miss just being in his presence and knowing that I don't have to worry about anything when I'm around him.
I'm in a whole other continent, studying a course that stresses me out, and alone. And I just really miss him right now.",4.024238410596027,4.590995165562916,5.1466821192052965,85.0581688741722,70.8543046357616,7.629403973509934,26.35827814569536,7.554174236665415,1.30177298013245,574,17,119,6,10,190,86,151,0.14400000000000002,0.711,0.145,0.6287,0,2,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,10,14,1,1,3,0,12,2,0,1,1,22,31,10,0,2,8,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,10,8,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,9,0,0,1,5,25,5,18,26,2,10,0,7,2,1,18,7,0,3,3,86,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.18252952241315426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937228299697452,0.0,0.0,0.15563692180204594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4617677705635933,0.16651023857007288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542663170967367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907054535323568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932681036156062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772360515591966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16540380496174156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19882072448178026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055907384613694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16881595532842664,0.0,0.12485438938313947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884979696205208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426109650256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17947529633874046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967386671232314,0.16332100186171458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396523998576929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15973591905718088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905112507134266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15848312856159494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142601010374336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103243401368079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20882973086073814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18995388461239796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zyke_o,2020/02/04,"I just want to get something off my chest… Sorry... Hi. I am Pretty sure noone will actually read through this, but I've been struggeling for so long. Why is this such a Long process? 

I haven't been well for quite some time. I am 21 now but in 7th grade I started distancing myself from social life. My 'friends' left me hanging over and over again, so I decided to cut my ties to them but never really returned to socialising, mainly because I was known as the 'strange girl'. I was an easy pick, though I would no say I was hardcore bullied. I remember in 9th grade I asked a boy to a dance and he said he wasn't sure if he would be going. The next day my whole grade knew and made fun of me for weeks about how I could have asked someone out who was sooo out of my league. Anyways, the Internet and books were already my best friends by then and mostly I would be sitting or laying in bed.

Fast Forward when I started studying at uni. Over the last 12-18 months I have been spiralling downwards. I feel so overwhelmed, my grades just suck, I keep failing everything I touch. Sometimes I canot breathe or just burst into Tears. I hate myself for my failures. 

It got really bad when I decided to get a tattoo. As soon as it was done I hated having it on my body. I was just so stupid. And it is not small at all either. I spent two weeks in bed crying at my parents' (I had holidays by then). My parents sent me to our primary care physician because they are convinced my behaviour had to do with my thyroid (I have Hashimoto). My doctor said I was so tired and irritated all the time due to my condition and low iron. Once I was on the right medication everything would be fine. I already felt ignored that first visit but was putting my hope in these two pills per day. That was back in July/early August. 

Spoiler alert: I did not feel better. I learnt that I had failed more than half of my exams and it got Pretty bad again. Over the last Semester I were barely able to pull myself out of bed. I went to lectures, but that was pretty much all I could do. The rest of the time I spent in bed watching something on my conputer. I feel like a lazy loser who cannot get their shit together, but even showering is hard sometimes. If I don't have to go out, I mostly don't do it. I tried out online consultation, but where I live they courses and the only one my insurance would pay for did not help at all (it also was only for 12 weeks). I did not feel better at all after that. In those 12 weeks I also started dressing more muted (I used to war statement shirts proudly, had Nintendo legging I wore whenever they were clean, etc.), dyed my hair Brown from having them in bright colours since 2015 (blue, green, pink; name it, I wore it) and I took out most of my piercings. The piercings came last. The last straw for that was my grandmother, who, on christmas, did not even say hello to me but said she still could not stand to see my septum piercing.

My doctor checked my blood a few weeks after she first prescribed me my meds and said my values were fine, so I went back again to complain about my other symptoms that just got worse and not better. Then only she gave me the adress for a psychological consultation center. They had a 5-6 week waiting period but over Christmas it was more like 8 weeks. So by then I had already gone on for 6 months at the lowest I ever felt. I just want to be in bed all day and feel so, so guilty for pulling my family into this, since I spend basically all my time off with them. 

I had my consultation with the center last week, but as I said, they only do consultations, which is more of a short term solution. But with that woman I felt understood for the first time. In those 45min I was able to cry and she actually came up with a game plan on what I could do to get a long term fix for what I feel. She gave me whole printed out pages with psychiatrists and said one of them offered emergeny appointments in the mornings (that was not what the receptionist told me, but I got a cancellation spot on Feb. 24, which is far better than the 6 months waiting list). I also have a follow up Appointment with the woman from the center.

​

I don't know where I was going with this, so I will just stop right here. 

If you have the time and energy, maybe you could leave some kind words or encouragement. I don't know if I deserve it, because I feel like an imposter most of the time, like I am a whiny white girl complaining about her o so bad life. 

So, yeah. Sorry for the rant.",3.6484937742228105,4.884950266298343,4.398573431186609,87.58525686484705,72.30386740331491,7.347736455842335,25.5516615815948,7.758597700099211,1.2089284241774547,3521,109,741,44,67,1129,369,905,0.151,0.7390000000000001,0.11,-0.9929,4,0,2,0,0,0,111.0,1,2,10,14,47,42,7,1,40,1,81,17,7,4,11,131,145,63,1,17,35,2,13,4,2,7,10,8,7,5,36,36,0,5,19,6,5,18,17,18,1,8,67,30,129,24,110,62,29,139,0,5,9,0,63,57,2,14,68,524,165,17,0.10037257660120688,0.0,0.09794915584453504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16614545130249234,0.12040186986655806,0.0,0.05437682240609405,0.060981833448225276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938348098202604,0.0,0.0,0.07718031577692562,0.12571036334502336,0.09177928660728273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052667413323548566,0.17754277462569645,0.0,0.05574565261314033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479948807227207,0.051168265663246434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003483375629295,0.0,0.1102545622633272,0.09709801243754106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273558530157413,0.0,0.05135799723864705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05597097760136046,0.06629514020878181,0.04539637098712484,0.0,0.0,0.09020839978806387,0.0,0.04731116614453082,0.0,0.17762986705818515,0.0717061887792913,0.1445601210886546,0.0,0.0,0.12806529357244806,0.0,0.0,0.07754760369715086,0.0,0.10488105709761243,0.0,0.08556607255410202,0.0,0.160554237434715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044957056725715726,0.09909713919497397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03363881116633965,0.0,0.0,0.04984630813546932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04460787896223476,0.0,0.05226129639096324,0.05516214313037198,0.20454261619831504,0.0,0.05314003298236089,0.05452754908170338,0.0,0.07089611922317532,0.0980739418253422,0.0,0.044315412024857566,0.13323985762692378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0474874794437169,0.0,0.0,0.0504188720935793,0.0,0.05574565261314033,0.050557405597546214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201746495492676,0.0,0.03689269640928527,0.0,0.03870675942396056,0.0,0.053373686958719115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053446759136880184,0.06801505556767756,0.15267573493348754,0.0,0.0,0.1114518680220418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15317249249411874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05045108128794675,0.0,0.05337929516002485,0.05019986942295939,0.0,0.06430124275744642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056851281412366964,0.08571763199098957,0.2864319163095337,0.07982030157351344,0.0,0.0,0.03999197413493066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05151550374422775,0.08302923258610534,0.0,0.0,0.051158600814151384,0.0425226792164401,0.07727171322802448,0.09927104477873168,0.1123588818811702,0.1065663394997262,0.0,0.04007883466513333,0.04195798421253792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459996558598599,0.052162769530914865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04930777344563946,0.0,0.20484819806865048,0.0576817557002936,0.0,0.047955149157363146,0.055758812894995576,0.03407319544162575,0.0,0.09804942263357304,0.0,0.0,0.04334483963058982,0.0,0.0,0.05920234624317915,0.0,0.3220513062759975,0.0,0.045123500313170084,0.09304638409913286,0.04528531921349867,0.11206239726388856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05114411531287391,0.1782544964689672,0.0,0.060981833448225276,0.0
mentalhealth,azolesoul,2020/02/04,"Finding Stored Motivation It seems like everyday I wake up with little to no motivation. As the day drags on, I seem to become more motivated with night bring most productive. How do I stay motivated all day and not just in short bursts?",4.408636363636365,6.89970895454546,5.595454545454548,74.53818181818184,73.0909090909091,9.854545454545457,26.90909090909091,10.125756701596842,3.0651090909090914,190,7,35,6,4,63,37,44,0.071,0.6629999999999999,0.266,0.875,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,5,1,15,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,7,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,8,4,3,11,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,3,5,22,4,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3442292718425829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4020193671165321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28487252107048344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15227251966901642,0.3123881446363076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924932846755687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5674888065256213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322124972680171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JS23K,2020/02/04,"Male with Gender Dysphoria advice needed Hello everyone, 

This is a throwaway just because it’s kind of a sensitive subject for me. I (M24) have had a strong sense of gender dysphoria since I was a young child. I have a done a great job of suppressing these feelings but now it’s becoming increasingly difficult.

I have a few problems with dealing with this. I have trust issues and have a hard time vocalizing my feelings with other people. My family is very conservative and that scares me into suppressing these feelings. I have pretty much kept this a deep dark secret my entire life, I was thinking about telling my ex in college but I’m just too scared. 

Should I talk to a therapist and is there a way to not have these feelings without transitioning? It’s not that I don’t want to (it would be a dream come true) I just don’t know if I could ever show myself again to friends or family. 

Any advice on my situation would be truly appreciated. Thank you all.",3.6408951406649592,6.00757539130435,4.856176470588238,79.52411764705884,74.97826086956522,8.025063938618926,26.584398976982087,8.841846274778883,2.296378900255755,768,29,139,17,17,253,112,184,0.08900000000000001,0.743,0.168,0.9514,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,1,9,11,0,2,12,0,22,1,0,0,3,40,34,7,0,8,10,1,5,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,13,9,0,4,7,2,0,2,5,4,0,0,5,5,20,7,17,23,4,12,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,2,5,104,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954557487728644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028051680410792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215575893991508,0.1669625084134624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022512303817313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207020916133183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15585627875153402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15470599265213794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367477513527916,0.0,0.1444555736606571,0.0,0.0,0.2850313997996811,0.0,0.30575741584770305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679854796532532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16667256654937246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542440245774562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15778893382441928,0.15001929676797435,0.0,0.0,0.15742700592240916,0.08308262168157245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10678039535537187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113208315135614,0.1120954199223052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480671348014994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15380079554239934,0.0,0.14465544298175614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027079928411772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505471919680575,0.16992866050558966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150990165999018,0.1321348780751005,0.1391829612282186,0.0,0.1755275069244726,0.0,0.09686776301888753,0.0,0.0,0.08815220199147647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473640127737387,0.08916778530447111,0.11999682696733845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14572870019200174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21478282101068213,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nalyd1369,2020/02/04,"My friend is suicidal, please help I've been trying to help my friend with mental issues for about a year now, I managed to get her to stop cutting for about 6 months and things were looking up until about a month ago. She's been diagnosed with depression and has dealt with bullying and verbal abuse from her parents since she was young. I'm the only person she's told this much information to, including other friends, counselors, parents, etc. About a month ago she started cutting again, not regularly but every 2 weeks or so. I'm frustrated that she hides from her problems and tries to ignore them, relying on outside help. Yesterday I made a bad decision and I reached out to one of her previous bullies to try and understand what happened. I didn't gain any information from the bully, the only real result was that she got angry, had a panic attack, and refused to talk to me. I didn't learn until today that she tried to kill herself twice last night. She resumed talking to me today, but she's still angry and I know that I've broken her trust. I don't know what to do and I'm afraid I'm going to make things worse, I'm talking to a counselor tomorrow but in the meantime, I want to hear what Reddit thinks. Any advice is appreciated, I really just don't know what to do.",5.5539890438247,6.207369466135463,6.23011703187251,78.33688869521914,67.48605577689243,8.984163346613547,30.4285358565737,9.017664075816787,2.495121314741036,1020,37,190,17,16,334,141,251,0.262,0.645,0.09300000000000001,-0.9948,2,0,0,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,1,1,9,15,5,2,10,0,15,1,0,3,0,37,36,16,2,2,6,2,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,12,13,0,3,9,0,0,1,5,11,0,2,11,2,29,4,35,25,2,26,0,1,1,0,33,4,0,1,21,124,41,2,0.0,0.13046629153105346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760147278233656,0.19521764838775807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14976168223905192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526981064386308,0.0,0.0,0.09194003206168036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484045075682783,0.11176271323567086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280547136123747,0.0,0.0,0.09277523063114458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552198594633331,0.0,0.05752967075844005,0.0,0.06257994364732418,0.0,0.08806768995372599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737285506874087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410572698346282,0.0,0.22141993431325674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492970936446033,0.0,0.0,0.1218240862547364,0.0,0.18154622123993566,0.08975706150640549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924674654031721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419189634988583,0.0735015035773369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096833885324688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636742311109931,0.0,0.08094596818725545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333390198955507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461564293319026,0.16749230045139107,0.0,0.12919426884557345,0.24453564638478986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614671347881457,0.0,0.12087137117462905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536358676699288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12533307770891847,0.07054141953873637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108688539550046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793878252829517,0.0,0.08793664848443114,0.09205967537831314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204461121459912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265514773644898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630880874679428,0.07055617641053627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087491254062077,0.10521800670362576,0.0,0.2990388952499348,0.0,0.0,0.11463186106781345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494769564207224,0.0,0.08832627230358761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122148916726854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709093750442379
mentalhealth,behenjaan,2020/02/04,"Got rejected from a job interview again Through this past year, I’ve been working on getting my mental health together so I can get a job once I graduate (in a few months). I started applying  to jobs intermittently  since last April. I wasn’t able to do this full time because it gives me a lot of anxiety to set myself up to scrutiny this way. 

Last week was my second telephonic interview after a long time, and the interviewer seemed to enjoy the conversation. He told me I was qualified, that my work was impressive and gave me his email and phone number to follow up with him. Today I receive an email that they’ve gone a different way. I woke up to this news, and I felt deeply hurt and vulnerable. 

I’m an international student and have been worried about finding a job in the US. I don’t have much time since my visa will run out and I don’t even know what I’m doing wrong at this point. I have a masters degree, 5 years of work experience across different industries and I will be graduating magna cum laude. 

Sometimes I want to give up and go back home because I don’t have the fight in me to apply to so many jobs, and face so much rejection. 

I wish it were easier because I know I’m talented.",5.233374999999999,5.648900587500003,6.383333333333333,77.795,68.125,10.4,31.0,10.355215969177356,3.0510749999999995,951,36,193,24,15,320,139,240,0.09699999999999999,0.8240000000000001,0.078,-0.6566,7,1,0,0,1,0,20.0,1,0,0,4,7,8,1,0,14,0,20,2,1,0,0,21,41,13,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,10,12,0,0,5,0,1,5,4,5,0,1,13,1,28,3,28,25,5,38,0,3,0,0,18,13,0,2,17,122,38,15,0.10866999856342642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313225145815513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356052109658066,0.0,0.19873266745741366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270740385372118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177550915997755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10630011073288738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434024035235642,0.0,0.09932240996395454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11355117812120752,0.20849232947920054,0.06175966448469487,0.0,0.08691332504446597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551112683469487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090048689692134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633348102851755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5391910275917258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194443784889541,0.17716110564138385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961695290832048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238734670270164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017432211259537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951379909549498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673935608106566,0.0,0.15976990534881824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573000186496618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037378098954316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272827389011087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892908533243072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17978589155289207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107477407263897,0.0,0.07691718430460627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900990501899392,0.0,0.1030064521887128,0.10383884057783352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071662808778867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640963806952864,0.17251437337514022,0.08716851797431452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496513531997633,0.0,0.0,0.2373391596228324,0.11035965850841882,0.0,0.0,0.11881358412693642,0.0,0.1399598323779821
mentalhealth,AdAmsonaquest,2020/02/04,"College student struggling with weed dependency and depression Struggling 24 y/o being dependent to weed

Let me be clear first and foremost because im a very honest person. Yes, i’m addicted to weed. I loved it to be honest. I have never been a happy guy and im in school getting my undergrad degree and i do work verh hard and responsible. I go to school, I work, I volunteer, I exercise more now but still miserable. i dont have friends anymore, im ugly so no girls will talk to me and i’m dumb. I wish i can smoke pot again and all that but now i have to quit because im applying to union jobs and shit. I really hate my life, im angry depressed and just feel like i cant move on without because then the rest of my life i feel like would be working and not enjoying anything because everyone wants you to work out, be rich, study, work 24/7 and watch sports. I dont want to be some boring douche white guy",1.1830319148936184,3.4138123031914915,3.2025957446808526,88.84400000000002,82.88297872340425,6.525957446808512,24.293617021276606,7.734863291789972,1.3573714893617022,715,28,150,13,20,241,113,188,0.27399999999999997,0.601,0.125,-0.988,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,7,6,18,3,3,3,1,18,6,1,2,3,30,29,15,0,4,5,0,3,2,1,2,4,0,0,4,2,13,0,0,2,2,1,2,7,9,0,1,1,5,21,9,15,19,4,12,0,3,2,1,8,3,2,3,9,87,23,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020036698212538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025170148385616,0.0,0.0,0.08318645281182313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464881655579665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17413314329333454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369477467395136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659350041122856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022258204546697,0.14443395333025713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598503118515835,0.0,0.0,0.07810000199384645,0.0,0.0528140804996996,0.0,0.05745039277791383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20018516471425246,0.0,0.10760959270414414,0.090554602657435,0.09980304225694983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5459595847996699,0.0,0.10031381023822822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336888414876763,0.14280227340898222,0.09877255629995726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123547417355114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744008378633252,0.0,0.0,0.0779649620120427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826576266659232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751906853780004,0.0,0.0,0.06475928266172691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20461202526253908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376493284952433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807286600236484,0.0,0.0,0.2113573428933016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125035565283438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340782790690403,0.11924812990198322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624571097624645,0.09744480538349548,0.0,0.3679647564927741,0.0,0.0,0.07180970586277406,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samsara7361,2020/02/04,"Got forcibly withdrawn out of my university I've had problems with depression and social anxiety for about 8 years now and its starting to get out of control. 

My family comes from the extreme poverty in southern U.S. and I was the first to graduate highschool and go to college back in 2015. I just got kicked out of my university during my final semester and must pay $5,000 back in finacial aid before returning.

Since 2015 my mental health has steadily declined. This is even reflected in my grades when looking at my academic transcript over the years. I don't even feel like the same person I was back then. I tried going to my university for help back in 2017, but they weren't very helpful. I don't have insurance to get proffesional help. 

Right now, I feel like a failure. I'm too afraid to ask for help and I don't know who to ask for help. My mom has plunged herself into debt she'll never be able to pay off, all so she could take out loans to help me pay tuition over the years. I've also run up so many credit cards and personal loans trying to take care of bills and family back home. After all of this, I have no transportation, no job, no degree and negative money. I have completed 118 out of 133 credit hours towards my degree with nothing to show for it, I can't even access my academic transcript because of the money I owe my university.  I'm being evicted from my housing and will have to move back in with mom, along with the 8 other family members currently living with her, in her 2 bedroom 1 bath trailer.

My plan is too work and save up for the rest of this year. Hopefully, I can finish up classes next year after paying off what I owe. I just feel like giving up. I have lost faith in my ability to be responsible and focused. I've wasted my mom's money. I'm in so much debt. All of my friends have moved away and are starting exciting jobs, buying their first cras, and moving to exciting places, while I will be back home sleeping on my mom's couch for the next year. I didn't expect this post to be this long-winded, thanks for reading.",5.575536585365853,5.871474260975614,6.174780487804881,80.0026585365854,67.36585365853658,9.29170731707317,30.790243902439023,9.174902378510234,2.5107385365853654,1637,59,319,28,25,534,208,410,0.11900000000000001,0.73,0.151,0.9705,8,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,2,6,22,17,0,1,10,0,31,2,1,1,5,47,59,22,0,5,3,4,3,3,1,4,1,0,5,2,10,27,0,1,5,3,18,8,11,4,0,2,8,4,44,13,70,41,6,70,1,2,1,0,25,29,0,1,35,215,54,19,0.07447581013182968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05955827845505511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05697379090159312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392496579557973,0.0,0.06997247521260677,0.4008711061177939,0.0,0.04539976259688565,0.0,0.0633734290195783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593305198195223,0.0,0.0,0.06415431588966666,0.07808646996163973,0.0,0.0835309538695216,0.05946287423844032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414590613607128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14757171058193885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21062749684478013,0.0,0.1129716220510984,0.15961660091744884,0.0,0.08158460965057986,0.0,0.12669817210429818,0.0,0.0,0.057539826162616776,0.0,0.07782107383635155,0.07144398338780204,0.08465263838727362,0.0,0.11913021771431502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916430352424568,0.0,0.0,0.29951739389198784,0.0,0.14941061989722618,0.07397128391392223,0.07334367097033584,0.08593508557845621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781149949963282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04092995753775439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915535673580293,0.0,0.0657635048064993,0.06590874834959969,0.06254092329865144,0.0,0.08129914447452657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550678203305185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505409971539671,0.0,0.0,0.34890067483512605,0.0,0.2374679994675152,0.054748289743438296,0.0,0.05744033606172533,0.0,0.1584117379696909,0.0,0.0,0.0714615484451974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300588094824037,0.07781137021960376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132723909088888,0.0,0.0,0.07126329211830272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744959643437511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360193492366949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061607159752835865,0.0,0.07452959567121929,0.07591870946947461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054287234724002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199308118040947,0.0,0.0,0.06856731982873178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112837271788164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061450343096570624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05421927677858968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877598796372885
mentalhealth,Cody214,2020/02/04,"Fuck you, mother Today, my mom fucking called me mentally retarded.  I had just gotten home and told my mom I was sick, with influenza of course.  As I was sick, I didn't want to spread the virus I had or possibly injure myself at the weight training I was supposed to do (today's leg day), so I told my mom I don't think I should go today, and she said ""okay"".  However, when it was already 30 minutes too late to leave for the gym, she just randomly got her fat ass up from her chair and said, ""let's go"".  This had happened before, but last time my mother hadn't fucking listened either.  She pushed me off my chair and spouted the usual shit out of her mouth, her useless empty threats.  Whenever this bitch is fucking sick, she tells me not to ask her for anything, letting herself do less work (even though I never ask the bitch for anything), but whenever I'm fucking sick, she makes me do at least three times the work at home compared to what I do in SCHOOL within two days,  I already have enough homework as an IB student, so I'm gonna ignore her for now.  If it happens again I genuinely don't think that bitch will wake up the day after.

TL;DR - I'm sick, my mother is an asshole and a hypocrite, next time she does this shit I will kill her.",5.062380952380956,5.0241426984127004,5.524698412698413,85.37585714285716,68.44444444444444,8.14857142857143,29.895238095238096,7.554174236665415,1.7022933333333332,968,33,202,9,15,311,140,252,0.258,0.742,0.0,-0.9972,1,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,0,2,11,15,12,0,10,1,23,19,7,1,1,23,49,15,1,3,8,6,1,0,0,4,7,3,3,0,7,7,2,1,2,1,0,3,6,14,0,2,15,4,40,1,25,28,4,30,0,1,0,6,30,9,11,3,18,132,47,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21264851863892684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15857514163217665,0.0,0.1801478747863662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08198647467719943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838378800376417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18641270355968026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431624755839306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995549674236292,0.0,0.06363804988869681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4453685976266635,0.0,0.0,0.10951547834585693,0.0,0.0770596346846448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040339411061334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19329315446895345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065966370585319,0.0,0.0,0.07853784258091773,0.1086866271018758,0.10202039121928018,0.0,0.19704813572626775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431415445798304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709780803931824,0.0,0.0,0.3385307152946234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743108070816176,0.0,0.10246896960247234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861977876508327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18330120450675771,0.0,0.0,0.09751101227699574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978031081609958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842138604135429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347395921927999,0.09466306388529236,0.0,0.16854680630432764,0.0,0.2739846705357047,0.18413248180094616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941196297264441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611555190921584,0.0,0.056829533083214916,0.0,0.0,0.11732794416377093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14028741797293673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gliding-Eagle,2020/02/04,Treatment options for depression? What are all of the treatment options for depression?,8.268461538461537,12.664931615384619,6.0065384615384625,63.57596153846157,79.0,8.753846153846155,52.653846153846146,8.841846274778883,7.4141076923076925,73,6,7,2,2,21,9,13,0.414,0.586,0.0,-0.8299,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,7,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chelshirexcat,2020/02/04,"How to help someone with acute psychosis. My boyfriend is currently in another round of acute psychosis. He thinks he is satan, thinks he is god chosen one sometimes and is anti satan. He could be talking normal to me, then increasingly gets more angry and starts to verbally attack me and say mean and hurtful things. How do I handle this?? It's my place, and I cant just kick him out, its cold but there are times I am afraid for my safety though he never gets physical with me, just more verbal which in my opinion hurts more. He legit thinks he is having a spirtual awakening, purging all the evil from the world all while ""channeling"" dead people. I woke up the other night to him doing ""black magic"" aka him dancing around the living room table with candles going",5.602,6.8540681310344835,5.689827586206897,80.09543103448277,67.6896551724138,8.006896551724138,27.603448275862068,8.238735603445708,1.903468965517241,609,19,107,8,10,192,101,145,0.155,0.8009999999999999,0.044000000000000004,-0.9621,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,2,1,5,0,13,0,0,2,3,25,22,11,1,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,6,10,0,0,4,2,0,3,2,5,0,1,1,4,14,0,15,19,6,18,2,2,2,0,13,8,0,1,7,74,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20715465834659932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17586669639173622,0.0,0.2247484344394241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577323656876288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20642967959029704,0.0,0.1122756096600879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241760148170886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4229755007685938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17444553970674254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21519636537126116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523673419582416,0.0,0.0,0.18539289376507997,0.1935629041684182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338690371425666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13696043404226696,0.0,0.20640393958958303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710443558254675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16738853113963395,0.0,0.19538790448303087,0.0,0.13983113142198408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878800430983248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124740726248574,0.3797576632421461,0.1940977361473604,0.0,0.11519647401996687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idkmyselfanylonger,2020/02/04,"I need to know what’s wrong Ok so I’m a 21 year old guy from the USA idk if this is relevant probably isn’t but any who. 

I’ve always had depression an anxiety long as I can remember in school I just said I was shy I’d purposely pretend to be sick to try and skip days giving a speech and such the thought of speaking in front of others was terrifying. My depression has got worse and worse over time I’m at a place where I don’t care what happens to me anymore my anxiety is even worse than before when I get around people I begin to sweat and feel like I’m going to throw up theses are all the simple things. A few days ago I started having really vivid dreams so vivid was like it actually happened I woke up and could taste what I had tasted in my dream in my mouth was disgusting and I was freaked out. I’ll see black objects move past me I’ve dismissed it pretty much as my eyes playing tricks on me but it’s made me so paranoid how could I have possibly tasted that ? Why am I seeing black objects move.. I took a shower the other night to calm my mind then it felt like I couldn’t breathe I panicked trying to catch my breath but couldn’t it stopped I left the bathroom my heart beat was racing fast I waited around 30mins was still racing reset of night I was paranoid and felt sick I finally had enough went to the ER for the filling sick thing an not being able to breath suddenly and fast heart beat they hooked me up to a EKG took blood and did ex rays everything came back normal they gave me medication to keep me from throwing up. Said they found nothing wrong maybe was a viral infection I said nothing about anything else they sent me home the entire car ride back I could feel my heart racing but idk If it was real or not.. last night I kept hearing someone talking and no one was there I just turned up the tv an ignored it.. today I wasn’t as paranoid I went for a walk stopped to get a drink and idk why but I looked up at this tree something just felt weird I looks down at the ground and the ground looked like it was sliding away.. the tree looked like it was moving farther away idk why I knew it wasn’t inside but it looked like it I shook my head and continued with my walk I fear I’m going mad or idk what’s wrong with me..  and no I don’t do drugs and I don’t take any medications..",0.8880902548142409,3.115406179381445,2.2605174090643883,95.1546275043766,84.11340206185567,5.30986189457304,19.666407313752188,6.638412140308013,0.07272845749854095,1827,51,407,20,53,587,237,485,0.217,0.6990000000000001,0.083,-0.9968,1,0,3,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,4,2,18,23,3,2,24,1,39,22,11,2,1,64,89,34,0,9,15,1,5,6,0,0,7,6,2,1,25,21,4,6,10,6,0,22,12,13,1,1,39,26,57,10,48,43,4,76,0,2,12,0,16,27,0,4,33,243,82,1,0.06951801923402427,0.0,0.06783955867757363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061623529573700965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578445609751178,0.0,0.0,0.09454927390718587,0.0,0.1063621888696848,0.0,0.0689431950311444,0.0,0.0,0.05720740651048361,0.12377155158849172,0.0,0.0,0.13062893492724412,0.10691013139945377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059154714124099735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951009419208623,0.07087825374219713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16651344487697908,0.0,0.0,0.08966674264741145,0.0,0.1197515362010273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810119306301082,0.08061883180107568,0.0,0.058073384712634575,0.0,0.0,0.07183069720665315,0.0,0.04591599606401869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062478313139784164,0.0,0.0,0.07822709879807509,0.07030079861497382,0.04966368683114397,0.20024460103763309,0.0761535920569386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762229198971592,0.0,0.0,0.07264059159869123,0.06668801859982552,0.07901738474815583,0.0,0.05559991057336478,0.0,0.0,0.06883376864909849,0.12294910964372692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134554368314347,0.0,0.0783518600924881,0.2471375625255936,0.0,0.0,0.06973224144455294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179080965524154,0.0,0.0,0.03820528531775372,0.056666464122157985,0.0,0.0,0.07553153130474642,0.0,0.0,0.20377795624174716,0.0,0.0,0.0615212594176231,0.29188813798019675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577963067461895,0.0,0.0,0.06984019417744251,0.0,0.0,0.14006418142344762,0.0,0.0,0.07019338206673507,0.0,0.0,0.22165995811561667,0.05110374298281934,0.05154673040240573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19571385531407465,0.06811289877628418,0.13340882873278634,0.0,0.07294746699656453,0.0,0.04710720897345367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636281548671423,0.0481950414019411,0.0,0.07263153394339994,0.0,0.0,0.07837112141203416,0.0,0.0707248177400516,0.07495218262110608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791267253196031,0.04453502323193402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875036406420857,0.0,0.19838266727333545,0.0,0.0,0.07035594685474895,0.11079372160245142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058902392102489536,0.05351836754948086,0.0,0.0,0.049205211821123716,0.0,0.05551717996037807,0.11624035378097587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226889883974516,0.0558759505645424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236936595806697,0.0,0.0,0.05518954203371354,0.040536516064461216,0.0,0.06589495370522211,0.0,0.15447415453730834,0.0943963435545452,0.07561564232486834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888780060234406,0.18818759856754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125344020700236,0.0,0.2280211227327533,0.0,0.04476732514892097
mentalhealth,veggiedoggy,2020/02/04,"OD from pills without doctor prescription So last summer I took like 10 paracetamol pills, which made me throw up and just be sick for two days. I knew from the start that 10 wasn't enought to die, so how many do you think would made OD? Maybe 30?? I'm petit and weigh 41Kg 

The thing is I read online it can leave you with serious liver injuries even in the need of a transplant. I wanna make sure that doesn't happen, in that case I don't die and even stay with more problems lol

A girl in my college died from pills that caused a pulmonary edema, do you know what mix or pills that might be? Tks",3.362601626016257,4.454192739837404,3.4586991869918684,94.60723577235771,72.82113821138209,6.442276422764228,21.796747967479682,6.42735559955562,0.11844065040650388,469,10,106,3,9,143,87,123,0.096,0.7859999999999999,0.11800000000000001,0.5772,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,3,0,0,6,4,0,0,6,1,11,8,1,5,1,22,22,7,5,4,3,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,0,1,9,5,1,0,3,1,0,2,4,2,0,1,5,0,10,2,14,13,1,11,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,5,62,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17690254729266788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105834059717594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5361665535189654,0.0,0.0,0.1762596885988542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274802977861308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228080882367973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463967272940448,0.14037051613802434,0.0,0.18234082451779754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413093863753991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32589013103975706,0.11494854912708258,0.1745894100639364,0.17300363196711324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826828867406432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276882414299778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647774649527806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722521622127439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188798237211985,0.18354821528553472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16230170321901827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114405722818039,0.11034237009603616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19132671447121471,0.0,0.0,0.16821981059396598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660000155786071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232988967449555,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mdbb123,2020/02/04,"how to cope with being blamed for a suicide attempt (tw) basically, i was  friends with this boy because he was dating my best friend, so after they broke up i didnt see him a whole lot and neither did our friend group. he often told me that this was the reason for his depression, suicide attempts and self harm. he would find me when i was in town and work himself up into severe panic attacks (crying ,screaming, hallucinating) in the town centre, would call me when he ran away from home, send me pictures of him about to jump off of a ledge, send unsolicited pictures of his self harm and call me whilst he was doing it (which was triggering as I had struggled with it in the past

eventually his mental health improved and we lost most contact (we have a lot of mutual friends so i still see him at parties sometimes). he never thanked me and i still really struggle with it a year today. i pushed my emotions away after it had ended and it feels almost like a distant memory, but that scares me.

sorry for the rant, but if anyone has tips on how to come with guilt/anger/sadness regarding this i would appreciate it :)",7.664292929292934,6.756271018518517,7.528367003367006,76.06242424242423,63.35185185185186,9.891582491582493,33.98821548821549,8.841846274778883,2.7419962962962963,884,31,166,11,11,283,129,216,0.158,0.74,0.102,-0.835,0,0,0,0,0,2,26.0,3,0,1,5,11,18,1,4,10,0,17,1,0,4,1,34,25,17,2,4,3,0,1,1,4,3,1,1,1,3,12,16,0,0,3,0,0,6,3,11,0,0,13,4,28,7,31,8,6,32,0,3,2,0,31,13,0,6,14,124,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828297764059573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259424752556807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438180165979888,0.22196062347215384,0.0,0.0,0.07200659674303594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123962649946768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412332861482899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175238127587616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12975241087805614,0.0,0.0,0.101739042930008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328723142867307,0.10462178984324877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05972646527303015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796215056118348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36504570263459096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12555907243234554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848685588506368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05770886090754119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894505118255034,0.2008476564007087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904005622463128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911036287195222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138591720721493,0.0,0.0,0.11276163209171587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567252636954096,0.1214499694741715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182615857226022,0.0,0.188257245895614,0.0,0.24645580124092226,0.13344520513509026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682652514333422,0.13222886661891706,0.0,0.0,0.188666131041864,0.0,0.0,0.2469753129761269,0.0,0.2584144650639243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875165565286354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196665590380912,0.11287145111190212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318799505007008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599484612641517,0.0,0.0,0.2517332637333838,0.0,0.0,0.07606724656194641
mentalhealth,RauchVR,2020/02/04,"Waver App Anyone else on there? It's a social and dating app for the mentally ill. unfortunately pretty empty, so I thought it can't hurt to spread the word https://the-waver.com/",4.2065625,7.5113515312500025,4.861250000000002,74.45875000000002,80.5625,6.95,20.5,8.07648339933343,1.5476000000000003,147,4,23,3,4,47,29,32,0.195,0.639,0.166,-0.0062,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623656222135182,0.3844617358580252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134518352687217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4016854766903704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37813793763348136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817381065244149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38249401878700345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29788625759820925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawyawyaywya,2020/02/04,CAN YOU OD ON ANTIDEPRESSANTS?? Okay its not me but a friend told me he took 12 antidepressants last night. I'm sure that is enough to either kill or be a severe shock yet he went to work today all fine. He told us he blacked out and woke up in a hospital and they just let him go. Can someone confirm this bc we are worried but it doesnt sound plausible,0.3754354354354348,2.689913000000004,1.968018018018018,95.59755255255257,87.91891891891892,5.451051051051049,19.033033033033032,6.937597516519254,0.1197555555555554,278,8,64,4,9,90,62,74,0.228,0.6970000000000001,0.075,-0.9464,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,2,1,1,1,2,6,1,0,3,1,7,0,0,0,2,12,14,5,2,0,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,5,2,7,4,6,7,3,11,0,0,1,0,12,4,0,1,4,38,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24129194876756704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804194887685223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271664827049165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583588840773143,0.0,0.0,0.1903526220616508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387933515566708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21914575701845704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638148102040105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19786349750430424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22009290570987008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22135274209769132,0.4462829581983626,0.2594529305158761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28089972472779423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21647839843620967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17000771205227586,0.2371542025644111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hitoshenki,2020/02/04,"Does anyone else pretend to be fictional character in their head? This might be seen as cringey, but, please don't be mean to me.

I've been wondering, is this a part of a mental illness, or do I have nothing to worry about?

So, I've been doing this for as long as I remember, tbh. Like, I used to pretend to be my barbies and stuff. In like 1st grade, I used to write ""Alvin"" on my papers (I loved Alvin and the Chipmunks lmao). This kind of all just seemed like normal kid stuff. When I was about 10 years old, I started to roleplay One Direction, (Yes, this is very cringey, I know, I'm not proud of it, but I thought I would throw it in there anyway). And, obviously, I would pretend to be them in my head. And as I started getting into anime I started doing this with a lot of the characters. Up to 60+ characters across all the fandoms I've been in, excluding 1D. 

So, I'll talk about how it feels now.

I do it with characters, usually the ones that I think are the coolest, or even the ones that I feel like I personally relate to the most. I'm quite honestly almost always in this state of mind, unless I'm talking to my friends or family. Other then that, I'm always just kind of a character in my head, or multiple characters. Even back in highschool when I did this, I would be pretending to be them, like working on my math assignments and stuff. 

I want to say it doesn't interfere with my personal life that much, because I always slip back into my own mind when I talk to other people, like it doesn't affect the way I act personally. I never show it on the outside. Like ever. It actually interfered more with my personal life when I was younger. Its like I can just control it better, now, and that I can keep it to myself easier. 

But its obvious that it interfere's with my life a lot. Its pretty much, as long as I'm not talking to someone, I'm always in this state if mind. It doesn't matter if I'm eating, or if I'm walking around in a store. As long as I don't have to talk, I do this. Its honestly only when I'm talking when I'm not doing this. 

Questions are welcome, and I'd love to hear others stories if they have a similar story.

(For reference, I'm a 17 year old female.)

So my question is, is this something I need to worry about? And is this a specific mental disorder? I've looked into things like DID and stuff, but none of those seem to fit the bill.

To be honest, I think I'm just weird, lol. But, I want to make sure its not a serious mental issue.",3.7356843559341537,4.265628769080236,5.327439277080696,83.63650713710145,71.4853228962818,8.751490733279612,27.94526303672154,8.925248442259385,2.0211661793484517,1915,66,409,35,34,652,209,511,0.034,0.775,0.191,0.998,0,0,1,0,0,0,82.0,0,0,4,5,28,23,0,0,20,2,42,10,3,6,7,88,80,43,0,11,23,0,2,9,1,4,4,2,0,5,45,18,1,4,14,5,2,3,11,2,0,3,9,6,49,21,68,59,11,50,0,0,2,2,24,20,0,19,33,290,94,6,0.0,0.0,0.06575605633576541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747430867177455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22427210815301876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04711573772674822,0.06904181332840696,0.0,0.05998512724485379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036266856713874,0.0,0.04107603166540587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959475908513796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557572793170059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07722671873611589,0.0,0.05896728909363355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894959810250892,0.056289823094544285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901162928397706,0.06095175200502224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352266498852324,0.0,0.06814170617097028,0.048138405567046884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05205991367099635,0.0,0.0352048194780334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074630944475237,0.0,0.07594550180876751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033031160264512,0.0,0.059893077725250675,0.0,0.14033798331529154,0.037031916814469136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278374844880382,0.2962792292246097,0.0,0.0,0.1788954179082737,0.056584722008554085,0.0,0.0,0.11457317895024613,0.12163151825736758,0.0,0.044978654156899535,0.0,0.0,0.07339980578626315,0.0,0.0,0.20371854830401573,0.0714826802555571,0.20411276586491006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906846884184163,0.04996361672066133,0.05196989869512746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602100155769793,0.06465577480784504,0.0,0.1414141790684493,0.0,0.13698132833386598,0.051247783305683935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296918756411172,0.0,0.04671486547535915,0.2353448331481221,0.0,0.07396626377599957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855270273432605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509686902135206,0.0716700804502519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633176684535213,0.0,0.0,0.05358564044529821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268584607858753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05709336984061252,0.051874700546146464,0.0,0.0,0.14308203400471206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085495069925264,0.0,0.0,0.06350764958410443,0.0,0.0,0.32495926194912905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0447662495897506,0.08635256975562644,0.0,0.05349454957928035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163944984329461,0.07421281909429964,0.05559800524282789,0.07948844032826198,0.05348546331729842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307395407292179,0.04905560299087403,0.1368613490315051,0.0,0.14360078076247204,0.0,0.0,0.08678484388393021
mentalhealth,Seno96,2020/02/04,My parents wont let me move out and living far away from school is destroying my mental health. Living far away from school and taking multiple busses is taking a huge toll on my mental health and I don’t think I can take it anymore. Everyday one of my busses is late so have to wait another hour in the cold. Everyday I have to deal with huge amounts of stress. Everyday I have to decline hanging out with my friends cause I’m gonna have to pay for the busses then. I don’t wanna ask my parents for money either because they think they can just buy me out of my problems.  Everyday I have to study for hours keeping up with my school and keeping my grades up. Everything is just too much at this point. I wanna run away or just kill myself. I still have at least two years of this constant pain.  Everyone I know has a great life where they go out with friends and don’t stress while I’m struggling to keep everything together. My parents don’t help me at all but rather just shout at me. I wanna end this misery right now.,3.9231884057970983,5.091707888888891,4.271227053140098,89.01930434782612,71.56038647342996,7.6456038647343005,26.360386473429948,8.021203637495839,1.3883986473429957,811,26,171,11,15,254,110,207,0.107,0.835,0.057,-0.8837,3,0,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,3,0,10,10,2,3,4,0,19,4,0,1,1,34,34,10,1,5,8,3,0,0,2,2,4,1,0,0,4,13,0,4,3,0,3,4,5,7,0,2,0,2,28,3,37,31,5,40,0,0,0,0,11,22,0,1,14,117,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926954944083288,0.0,0.0,0.10334479794236212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741896452672087,0.0,0.29371617197426664,0.0,0.0,0.06352328511071104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704872981183967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261015313953175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743227493664513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229598516816916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957372927133204,0.1873080771581248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16101929056340006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059222927346514215,0.0,0.0,0.1148879797295444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221533168268439,0.0,0.0,0.06984738729714217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052447262107237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778704440212493,0.11528899818094078,0.0,0.057269140046525814,0.0,0.11754941525369468,0.0,0.0,0.10655815599899908,0.07360409784934037,0.0,0.0,0.18403241016019947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100311852853582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075496560621467,0.0766037313801905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061298784877894,0.0,0.11088301059924638,0.0,0.34712679435510807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850877837159458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971149988941504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899173948601878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163874741428663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321940610299837,0.0,0.2387362742996555,0.10893920787199904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23505084672198856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335425718168635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179456050160947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710553767990156
mentalhealth,Blaze143143,2020/02/04,"Dad abused much mom I don’t know what to think at this point. My mom was abused by my dad this morning. I always thought of my dad and a smart and nice dude, but my parents have hated each other for really long. This morning i was asleep but awake, and I overheard my mom crying and my dad saying “shut the fuck up.” My mom used to have mental problems but they got better if that has to do with anything. I didn’t think much of it as it was really subtle and I thought that I just misheard. But today, she talked to me and told me not to tell anyone, and I agreed to. This is what happened according to my mom: My mom texted my dad something that probably got him mad, as they have been fighting for the last couple days (I’ll explain that later) and 20 minutes later, while my mom was making coffee, my dad comes down and just slaps my mom and she falls to the ground. He just repeatedly kicks her then leaves. My mom was bleeding just a bit, but nothing major happened to her. What made me the most upset was that I really looked up to my dad and this is what I hear from my mom, and I know that she wouldn’t lie to me like that. Before this all happened, about 2 nights later, they got in a huge fight and my dad was acting chill because maybe he wanted us to think that he was the victim. But I guess he just let it all out. Please someone tell me what to do I feel like my life is just going down",2.435154854079812,3.736904034246578,3.3434961286480065,93.7037075640262,75.43835616438356,5.900178677784396,20.572364502680173,6.0469075449839425,-0.07673901131626026,1086,23,245,6,23,346,138,292,0.127,0.8009999999999999,0.07200000000000001,-0.9654,1,0,1,0,5,0,27.0,1,0,3,1,7,13,6,1,8,0,22,4,1,3,2,50,49,24,0,4,14,19,1,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,23,17,0,0,9,0,0,4,4,8,0,0,17,4,46,5,30,30,8,26,0,0,1,1,42,11,1,3,13,164,69,0,0.0,0.16386502154795532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05753908970642881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04835191824735068,0.0,0.05690529998999881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04215374778868749,0.0,0.05884232406930798,0.0,0.0,0.061158352989542024,0.07549487463645242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05956737870154211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651415736518773,0.07595901834725598,0.04459661082994473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03496477360836542,0.04940141793034606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06392889425974901,0.0,0.0,0.0393000509706287,0.0,0.16591887922840656,0.0,0.07617751426986771,0.0,0.1834497417698194,0.0,0.0,0.06827219898886071,0.0,0.0,0.07793809185389969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600705414995025,0.056367214263645625,0.0,0.0732208202077012,0.0,0.07071148201767087,0.048843326845383915,0.0675672751636942,0.0,0.0,0.06119637187679226,0.05806934125650803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06543225510641795,0.04615876379317737,0.0,0.06947137518458947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968784436169864,0.0,0.0,0.8098870021024996,0.0,0.0,0.10166773858263296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489343675459043,0.0,0.0663521551091672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678389278534288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590692434661236,0.06536995357231187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455636773496446,0.06616807381174643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289951485269738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054991572477746865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058591334534741676,0.0532357424701664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05558087532807382,0.1208818719207412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292731669047972,0.0,0.10979618330236968,0.0,0.0,0.06554696912777506,0.06607664988936521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318002031620315,0.059724176508820385,0.0,0.0,0.04078699341026743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,little_blue_penguiin,2020/02/04,"How to cope after talking about trauma in therapy? I'm working with a new therapist and I just left my appointment. She asked me to tell her about a particular traumatic event today that happened a few years ago. I described the event in detail and it was, to say the least, intense. I'm pretty shaken up right now. To anyone else who has been through this, how do you deal with it after you have to relive the experience? I'm feeling really anxious and uneasy even though I know in my rational mind that I'm not in any danger now.",4.017357142857144,5.520329628571432,5.374464285714287,79.90741071428573,71.76190476190476,8.29761904761905,27.410714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.1863571428571427,421,15,79,8,8,141,73,105,0.135,0.7959999999999999,0.069,-0.7238,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,1,9,2,1,0,6,0,5,0,0,2,0,12,13,6,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,10,0,17,11,2,17,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,0,10,57,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18794601242631084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14418322945463338,0.0,0.0,0.23952616978939245,0.0,0.14825173925439256,0.21724309967458214,0.0,0.0,0.1982133223681712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21858688652887912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17711840201858206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400395015753431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20739963670975906,0.0,0.0,0.10720543647428668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18749165334052406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652255362123436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303641193450645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21408326250415816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20477358747696253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157040916963821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582766335616142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810668839742007,0.0,0.16860957247764746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17041643300511633,0.18531785714167126,0.0,0.2424673147292845,0.24617558911414156,0.0,0.0,0.20831198170398044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20097345727496696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15435561055518224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365361625167697
mentalhealth,Curious-spinach,2020/02/04,"Breaking up with my Fitbit So I’ve been toying with the idea of ditching my Fitbit for a while, and today I’ve decided to take it off and leave it off for a few days/weeks. 

It sounds so trivial but I have a history of obsessive behaviours, in particular with my weight, calories, gym visits etc. And since then I’ve stepped completely away from scales and calorie counting but I’m finding my Fitbit just gives me different kind of numbers to punish myself over? Especially since my resting heart rate has been high since I’ve had a stressful few weeks. 

Has anyone else found their fitness trackers have done more harm than good to their mental health?",5.506991869918702,7.1311980731707365,5.377398373983741,80.85113821138212,68.26829268292684,8.06829268292683,30.739837398373986,8.515128840125781,2.410554471544716,525,21,93,8,9,163,83,123,0.14800000000000002,0.799,0.053,-0.9081,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,0,3,6,1,2,5,0,8,3,1,0,0,14,12,10,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,7,1,0,4,2,0,2,0,4,0,0,5,2,10,2,19,7,5,15,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,4,61,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284184013007185,0.18000829031620005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16506023264693376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842005854342549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835516441572228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17978500002793418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676084431984698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19593330641117465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057134287990396,0.0,0.0,0.1926276578502472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16853141872405333,0.0,0.14735480712178986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18674312031040236,0.0,0.20818554270532635,0.0,0.1856190399382204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19832504842623125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829471100566756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18602323581319335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770474336156905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43598109502153776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124461335729132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320919688657435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665272153508839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818450738975493,0.21393491598892872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nightow0491,2020/02/04,Question Hi I have a problem I was diagnosed with bi polar stage 2 with depression and anxiety . plus ADHD well the thing is I can’t figure out something I’ve had a known drug problem .off and on since I was 16 I started treatment for my bi polar and anxiety and ect .when I was 22 and every doctor knew about my substance abuse problem and still treated me anyway for the disorders . and I would relapse then go back into recovery off and on but recovery last the most close to a year .now I’m 7 months sober I’m happy about that part but the thing is I’m untreated for my bi polar not by choice. But by the choice of my pysch doctor because she told me I needed rehab and that she doesn’t believe I’m really bi polar . So she stopped treating me then after that I gave it some thought and got sober . Was going to go to rehab but I figure if I can not get sober or even stay sober what is rehab really going to do . Cause once your out of rehab you could still relapsed . So I was reading that the doctor is supposed to give you a dual diagnosis because of the bi polar and my substance abuse . Was wondering if that is corrected and also if that is corrected why and how come no one ever diagnosed me with a substance abuse disorder and help treat me for that also .,3.3123255813953487,4.741308798449612,4.854178294573647,83.23684883720931,73.41860465116278,7.640620155038763,26.465891472868208,8.238735603445708,1.7571900775193794,1002,35,196,16,20,337,130,258,0.129,0.8190000000000001,0.052000000000000005,-0.9533,0,0,2,0,3,0,12.0,0,3,0,0,16,9,0,0,12,0,20,15,0,2,3,54,39,31,0,9,10,0,0,0,0,1,10,0,0,0,11,23,0,1,7,1,0,5,5,4,1,1,12,0,28,5,28,25,3,29,0,1,0,5,12,8,0,8,14,144,39,4,0.0,0.3829742920063633,0.0,0.0,0.12948641269543806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17232442813007867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16484653670654234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284788554715622,0.0,0.13135853368652267,0.0,0.0,0.12138971318155245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068196612140396,0.0,0.0928112437476346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602419398205667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927990774626392,0.21871420053842544,0.0,0.0,0.2469661289880948,0.3308392532605919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494792893005613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07116338062446591,0.09745991085778832,0.09077830973229516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05629138548488247,0.10335711424171347,0.24493181935736616,0.0,0.08617209552204858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469466111058445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722180092008512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782510455278641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599961023139452,0.0,0.0,0.07989023238129606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147430128852229,0.07300959425251627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11667540770243308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092871313486801,0.0,0.0,0.12069706453486714,0.0,0.1077723767924494,0.0,0.13804613124170434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912630492784797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294599457264692,0.0,0.0,0.0762612056297756,0.11483993677189823,0.17208774925448375,0.09007815629769624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14315961562827936,0.0,0.0,0.08553608160343966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295326389358513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687409417286258,0.0,0.0972214976163141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684292601443615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653769214632887,0.0,0.0,0.06938310114562413
mentalhealth,keshtahl,2020/02/04,"nobody cares about me absolutely nobody cares about me, not even my parents. all my family does is constantly make me feel like shit and im so tired of it. everytime it makes me want to leave or just kill mgself and im this close to cutting myself again. the blades right next to me. honestly whats stopping me from killing myself anyway im too useless to do anything right so why do i even think i can achieve anything in life. i quit.",1.4888636363636394,3.9555101590909096,2.7260909090909102,91.1916363636364,83.77272727272728,5.792727272727273,22.43636363636364,7.1686216300943375,0.8261327272727268,346,12,71,5,10,111,61,88,0.226,0.652,0.12300000000000001,-0.8943,1,0,0,0,0,2,7.0,0,0,0,2,10,9,4,0,1,0,4,3,1,2,1,13,11,5,2,1,3,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,13,4,9,11,1,8,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,1,5,44,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25306371471550776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31353832097355666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16616056419865388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345569210809377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20311482791470065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495179193568172,0.0,0.07774597001575254,0.1098465901758172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4982634405381353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3402266038996766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16281025457675974,0.0,0.0,0.10860564598314136,0.07511965339403565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20527276429840666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635261228447825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17073292946343493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16354330523310748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26262139300520243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15783302735306493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855073111148585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852357207140527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17672516938626176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069197479227126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13874500891233707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NewVigil,2020/02/04,"To anyone willing to read my story, and maybe help me with the fallout. I'm gonna keep this somewhat brief. It all started 7 years ago with a act of kindness. I did the stupidest fucking thing I could've ever done, I helped someone in need. I cosigned for a new vehicle for my wife's sister, she needed a new vehicle badly for her 2 kids and hers had the transmission blow and zero coverage from the provider. Long story short I cosigned, she stopped paying it and moved completelt.outnif state 1 year later leaving the vehicle behind. So I was stuck with it unable to afford a lawyer to fight it. 7 years, $465 monthly payment, my wife became very Ill after the birth of our daughter in 2014, I was working full time minimum wage at the time, we had very little money to say the least. All we could afford was the rent and barely make the 465 payment. I went bankrupt, bank seized my 2nd vehicle my wife used to get back and forth to work so she lost her job after nobody would help us get her a ride, my credit cars debt was over the top. Leta fast forward to right now, I'm working a better full time job, the vehicle is almost paid off only 2 paymets left, we have a nice large 2 bedroom beautiful apartment, we can afford food instead of relying on catholic charities for every meal, my wife's health is recovered. Yet...I dont care..I dont feel any sort if relief or happiness, I cant cry joyfully knowing this 7 year nightmare.of grinding and clawing and working nonstop to pray we catch up is mere weeks from being done. My wife is confused she thought I'd be flying over the moon to bensine with this but I only feel tired. I feel drained, I feel burned out and ready to physically and emotionally collapse. The betrayal was enough to begin with but the initial emotion of fighting through and weathering this storm is nonexistent. I cant understand why I dont want to celebrate, we barely clung on and I somehow managed to man up and pull us through but I just feel like I want to die or go to sleep and be left alone. Can anyone understand and help me? Please.",5.364220374220373,5.987418380835383,5.736130221130222,81.81858202608203,67.8943488943489,8.620260820260821,32.11576261576262,8.617729084823388,2.4876302022302026,1639,67,315,24,26,525,227,407,0.132,0.7759999999999999,0.092,-0.9577,8,1,0,0,3,1,44.0,9,0,0,7,8,14,3,1,22,0,29,7,1,2,3,61,58,23,1,7,7,7,5,1,0,3,3,1,2,2,9,27,2,2,9,1,8,10,5,6,0,1,15,6,44,8,47,36,7,55,1,1,0,1,33,21,1,8,26,188,53,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804126740927099,0.0,0.08815834793344737,0.09118185969520956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05986954349570496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311784089143993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769656177618377,0.07350889314567206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786334695171608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976163475319034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14058396599242146,0.0,0.09670671479160853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09137058931708128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18018894054883267,0.3095431802759924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980640654685666,0.0,0.09096782816041682,0.0,0.0,0.07963632182658761,0.07417666017839374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22257583514568324,0.06289508392868294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645711628005608,0.0,0.0,0.0813906429893164,0.09199349457809124,0.0,0.050034596328476164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371915963807792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358134715990307,0.0,0.0,0.2360427614503552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17473025888069016,0.0782531142422269,0.0,0.09167907759952472,0.048383935625828926,0.0,0.0,0.09322059619388964,0.19130927660791,0.0,0.0,0.043011411618233186,0.08823821332183766,0.0,0.07791175044304602,0.0,0.0,0.09610497565413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058766720560723074,0.0,0.08844701540827148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027189515227361,0.09357153122569148,0.0,0.13055961575834635,0.0,0.1700572424212625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13391526346590965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664039166405618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806283123717737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518483062647763,0.0,0.07001215170047878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810258734935343,0.0,0.07459516462163016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06231446202816901,0.0,0.0,0.07360455166982889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05848920403477454,0.0,0.0,0.06989313721306807,0.1540087582735729,0.10118788706202962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18330342153177226,0.21180017004181967,0.07603743478355295,0.0,0.14528280132355587,0.10385537424672203,0.0,0.07061958068890073,0.0,0.0,0.08161304117261257,0.07944150989357175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563737814694262,0.0,0.0,0.06254038434863038,0.0,0.0,0.22677693519429484
mentalhealth,Cheap_Meal,2020/02/04,A rut becomes worse The entire school year has been horrible with other people but then Monday I lost my AirPods at school and they probably got stolen and I haven’t told my parents yet and when I do they will kill me and I’ve been worrying so much I’m sick now,0.4822077922077917,2.883882363636366,2.063376623376626,94.2636363636364,89.0,5.324675324675325,18.766233766233768,6.868970318607317,0.2336233766233761,210,6,45,3,7,68,44,55,0.38799999999999996,0.612,0.0,-0.9799,1,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,2,1,4,2,1,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,6,10,8,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,8,0,2,4,1,7,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,6,30,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.283407596955531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20523591636854474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839029613628879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801221173996595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886392156530907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849370608955857,0.0,0.0,0.17790232726176006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766709465075005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5194097283900427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452035932319432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606017619566055,0.2615093700622971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16524960032415684
mentalhealth,LaCroixPommeBaya,2020/02/04,"Low cost therapy I’m sorry if this has been posted elsewhere.  I lost my job last June and hence lost my health insurance.  I have GAD and my meds are up to date, but I desperately need to see a therapist.  Luckily I did get a job and I start my new health insurance in March but until then what are my low cost options?  Are there any online groups I can join?  My biggest issues are on focuses and obsession on things I need to let go of, especially in my relationship.  Thank you guys for any help!",1.8448,4.054289879999999,3.7680000000000007,85.85900000000002,80.2,8.0,23.0,8.841846274778883,1.7367000000000008,388,13,82,10,10,131,67,100,0.145,0.726,0.129,0.5502,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,2,1,6,0,1,2,0,10,2,0,0,0,10,20,9,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,5,0,0,4,1,15,1,11,15,0,18,0,4,1,0,5,8,0,2,8,50,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379517451524391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140712998378987,0.0,0.09943135373341246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323364525835244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.371939446506932,0.0,0.0,0.11726911493350185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826082914151772,0.34723306379127866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426122430376568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789040524850085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38196961826464376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194336337006905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25945486304200016,0.0,0.1689733011445703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755919427881807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18783694186223654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13941703789876034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19584857752504894,0.1238345419228223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16107569858017826,0.2000770855961879,0.20313704744028865,0.11623279016358405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GDShadept,2020/02/04,"i cant stop getting furstrated over losing games it just hurts me from all the possible sides. the title says it all. i always tend to fucking vent or harm myself in a light way. ive been having this problem for ages and IT DOESNT GO AWAY IT JUST DOESNT. breathing doesnt help, nothing helps. there is NO help. it just all ends up the same one way or another. and then some people want to support you but they dont really have anything to say besides ""sucks to be you"" this just keeps going on and half my posts on reddit are literally this. it just hurts.",1.2551030219780197,3.706876776785717,2.52,92.34038461538464,84.80357142857143,4.874725274725276,19.32967032967033,6.297961479604792,0.047724450549450737,437,12,89,4,13,140,81,112,0.149,0.777,0.07400000000000001,-0.8967,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,1,1,6,8,2,0,4,0,12,2,1,0,3,20,21,7,0,2,8,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,9,3,0,2,0,1,0,2,6,7,0,2,1,3,9,1,12,19,5,16,0,3,0,1,9,7,2,3,4,66,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14859129433582266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18725472038682894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695456989715736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16778001415637533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092922166604081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15816720196920672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16509258648304095,0.0932996927024169,0.0,0.20298011216319475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3590914315563929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3823431235342153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872843064156547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19978322822111186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17135051423208114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210091499687332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238035774109081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013199888261465,0.17102846723719134,0.0,0.0,0.1708751351743601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144017109604406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840249636802176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14929929738596284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026483246478004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10532999694329817,0.283493985513207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snookis-new-nose,2020/02/04,"With acknowledging your heartache, you have also started the process to defeat it.  Example: “I am having such a bad day at work, Idk if I can get through this..”
“Bad day at work” 
“Day” singular.  
Today brings tomorrow.  Tomorrow will be better.",2.5268217054263538,5.504512418604653,3.67011627906977,81.51432170542634,87.6046511627907,7.517829457364342,28.096899224806204,8.344100000000001,2.8544294573643416,186,9,32,5,6,60,36,43,0.231,0.71,0.059000000000000004,-0.8176,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,4,2,4,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,3,9,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,5,7,0,10,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,7,22,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333356797238198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4872468029267148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580549457615585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5645202376937114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244256240671636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065227831628094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765725160387321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4248373905170304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_Chosen_One_1999,2020/02/04,"Here is a poem, I wrote about my experience, being Jesus Christ in a psych ward.  Rounded shower rails, bounded by a belief. Grief for mankind, Blind to the truth, but please, let my words sooth you. Rounded everything – bringing sorrow – as I know there's nothing, to hang myself, on tomorrow. “Lord, we need a favor,” they tell me. “Take this, it'll help.” They place things, in my hand. I had a revelation, when I took my medication. A symphony took place, gave me dignity. “But can't you, see?” I would ask, my fellow patients. “I'm Jesus,” “What?” They would soon reply. “I tried to commit suicide, I almost died, I lost my pride.” I wish I had been able to tell them. I wish, my belief didn't, get in the way of someone's recovery. I wish I could, have told the girl with scars on her wrists, “My love, let my forgiveness, like sweet, sweet honey on your lips,” this is where I am quick on my feet, and repeat my symphony. “Like the sound of a symphony, to your ears, like holy water on your skin.” She with her medication, such elation. Then there was me, unable to find my medication or my occupation. I had forgotten, whilst experiencing the pain, they were coursing through my veins. And then they said, “lights out,” and it was lights out. And they gave you your medication. “I know what you want,” they would tell, me. “And you know what we want.” “But I have, told you all I know, what could it be?” I ask them. “Information, information!” I was the puppet, them the puppeteer. I hung, head first, from the string. I am and was just one, of a number of guests, that you will drop after running a couple of tests. Let's talk, about pills, and religious thrills. My nurse, and doctor, say I'm not to be believed. And the cure, for me, isn't diet nor drugs or pills. I've simply broken, through a wall, undergoing a new routine to banish all my ills...After all, I had too, I was Christ on the psych ward. Was I like, him? Demon too many, angel to a thousand.",1.7345944117448049,4.006891522427445,3.0823218997361512,90.27260131249581,81.00527704485488,6.10353832622962,20.27203842771125,7.321109707123232,0.4903159596779645,1473,40,313,21,39,478,193,379,0.095,0.7170000000000001,0.188,0.9886,1,0,1,0,0,3,98.0,2,11,10,3,13,16,0,0,22,0,34,21,8,0,5,52,62,19,3,11,7,0,4,4,3,5,10,4,1,1,11,15,2,1,10,0,0,5,5,4,0,3,22,16,74,12,37,27,3,33,9,3,4,1,49,15,0,3,15,212,85,4,0.09706405577565548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09719563098551136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18148357893170325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935795214440584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499550072551754,0.107399531527916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073716545704853,0.0,0.0,0.099349174042591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256348890156387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723491460471264,0.09494727168063012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871478851531353,0.08256263625757666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05071196297161686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961572420659176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505999056393802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21337546643977404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977637199647624,0.0,0.18968237902859503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595688291030683,0.0,0.08760409997128224,0.0,0.0,0.09840771775054677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3911272981495749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197176746346362,0.0,0.09374506991254328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313557934880216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577311623109196,0.0,0.10328299887006903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20282255850877695,0.1065471854527706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923301444877663,0.07718923301873264,0.0,0.0,0.07734748552753215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224205947394639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617232288482407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729800901725063,0.07801641131138644,0.25451478905808306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448504566228802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854977297647336,0.2156834748330696,0.0659001224197129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450178987890032,0.0770449295148076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3348566216543455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20685456095764515,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,retro_incli,2020/02/04,"Please help, am I considered in early stages of mental illness? Made an alternate account avoiding emarressment.

Lately when I'm alone, I've been acting super weird and abnormal. Constantly, like, making strange creepy faces and movements, cursing myself and everyone I know, overly anxious about my studies (first year college), angry about everyone and hateful ( when alone ) for stupid reasons, all of which is unlike me, if all make any sense.


I know all aint healthy, so I thought of opening it up and look forward to what conclusion I'd get to.


 Now I do have some theories:

1.Those are ways of depleting my excess energy
2.Or to cope with my anxiety about studies and social life.
3.Mental illness starting to fire up
4.I'm a straight out dipshit",8.300454545454546,9.221711621212124,7.472272727272728,70.87840909090909,61.57575757575758,10.539393939393939,41.5,10.411451182825502,4.777663636363637,602,33,91,13,8,186,101,132,0.24,0.66,0.10099999999999999,-0.9535,0,3,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,3,7,6,2,1,2,0,7,4,1,4,3,23,18,10,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,9,0,1,5,0,1,3,1,4,0,1,3,2,10,2,18,15,4,21,0,0,1,0,2,8,0,2,11,56,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3782109017450905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12416567345887937,0.0,0.13967883904141992,0.20627175778639126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973120826850123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3489401151758666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15530872448671426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539436532486603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802672276694596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238446599596818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20069048804432932,0.0,0.20596650741938852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12896685987816575,0.08920296661988286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332740582459392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276858520580718,0.24375697589594714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3680102498937784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20042610338524208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877302272582997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18612483095139365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923628095661774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495397735640067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492935634689705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758028055350178
mentalhealth,___electricblue___,2020/02/04,"Daughters Eval is Tomorrow (this post may not be in the correct subreddit.  I apologise in advance.)

BACKSTORY:
There was an incident that had happened recently when my daughter was home from school for feeling ill.  I was at work and she was with her Grandma and Uncle.  My daughter had her phone and was texting her friends and counselor about wanting to inflict self harm upon herself and commit suicide.  Her counselor called 911.  The police showed up and naturally DCF did too.  After reports, statements, etc. were completed, my daughter was given the option to go our local mental health center for outpatient intervention.  So, she chose to go.  It was a 3 hour deal.

My family has had a few run-ins with DCF.  I'm not going to go into much detail, but the cases were found unsubstantial and closed.  I will share this though, during the past couple of times of having the pleasure of DCF snooping around, my daughter told the workers how she wanted to be placed into foster care.

My daughter has seen a couple of therapists in the past, but her and them didn't really connect.  Since therapy has been inconsistent and that it's extremely hard to find a therapist who accepts state health insurance, she was never given the proper tools to help her go through the motions of her emotions in a...idk what kind of way hopefully somebody will have the word that I'm looking for though.  Maybe constructive?

She can be super super dramatic.  She's been through a lot of trauma growing up (she's still growing; she's an early aged teen).  Instead of my daughter using logic when she gets emotional she goes off of her feelings.  When she loses control, her thoughts and what she says become negative about herself and others.  Of course, they're all lies, but in the moment she doesn't realize this.  My daughter talks down on herself by saying she's stupid, she's always mean, and that she's not good enough.  She says how she doesn't want to live in this world anymore.  She feels that everyone hates her and how nobody cares about her.  Nobody loves her either.  She says things, like, ""I wish DCF would come and take me away"", ""I wish I was in foster care instead of living with this stupid family"", and ""I want to be placed into a mental home"".  Common teen, right?  Maybe, but more than likely not.  It's truly heartbreaking to know at more times than others she feels alone.  It's so hard to convince her that she's loved very much by not only me, but by her close family members too.  I understand so much of what/how she's feeling.  In my early twenties, I was diagnosed with manic depression and anxiety.  Depression is unfortunately inherent.  she more than likely has this disease too.

FAST FORWARD:

My daughter is going to be taking a mental health evaluation tomorrow so that not only her therapist, but her case manager and psychiatrist can help her further.  The process supposedly lasts roughly for about three hours.  I know that my daughter will be given a questionnaire to fill out.  Can anyone give me some examples of what the questions may ask?  Also, does anyone else know what other tests they may be giving her?

FYI:
I'm not going to coerce my child or sway her in any kind of way by telling her how to answer these questions.  I will tell her to be honest about her choices.  This way I can help her see that her answers will have a huge impact on the results.  I want her to know that a lot of the questions will probably be asking about her feelings.  I feel like once she reads one that she'll answer it by going off of her feelings instead of using logic.  I just don't know how to approach her without her thinking that I'm the enemy.  I'm extremely worried about how her answers may result in us having another encounter with DCF.  I'm even more terrified how they may take her because her answers will be negative.

I'm at a loss.  My kid doesn't know how to think logically when she's going through mental pain, so if she answers a question about self-harm, living in the safety of her own home, and/or about abuse with a negative answer, then DCF would more likely get involved. And all I want to do is prevent this.

Edit:
She's such a sweet, empathic, and intelligent young woman.  She is definitely her own individual.  I'm not putting her on a pedestal just because I'm her parent.  She truly is all of these things.

Edit:
I wish I was able to teach her how to address her feelings more in a logically way early on.  I just recently became consciously aware myself about why I've struggled with the same problems that are an everyday occurrence in her life today.",4.825512507150656,6.652287887340304,5.346994296808641,79.61588278121589,70.24274099883857,7.974212560888938,29.22705288886577,8.580053182427356,2.353087284830204,3625,141,636,61,67,1162,356,861,0.12,0.748,0.132,0.897,3,1,0,0,1,2,110.0,2,0,3,8,45,36,3,1,38,0,69,9,0,14,6,141,144,49,1,14,21,11,12,5,1,15,7,4,4,4,38,34,0,2,41,2,0,18,18,13,0,2,27,20,114,23,108,92,22,95,0,5,3,2,121,43,0,16,35,464,152,10,0.052931074728053085,0.0627146681993514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05482063024135018,0.0,0.04232896133655347,0.04404289439372944,0.0,0.0,0.03599494589896925,0.05550284699778797,0.04049212728823804,0.0,0.05249340312616665,0.07402127631728493,0.054234141163909684,0.0,0.04711987854748236,0.09896681940172754,0.0,0.04973048709143783,0.0,0.0,0.06453258373149533,0.058458213453796024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05404854534627717,0.0,0.16190027506937213,0.0,0.0,0.04559543404055945,0.05549722479652445,0.0,0.059366701128150325,0.0,0.11713445484291846,0.0,0.0,0.05456961384893084,0.09117891420521708,0.05372392665860394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046320340190737344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044217120968127084,0.11908066948234565,0.0,0.054691949562231744,0.059032140019491613,0.03496047565302407,0.0,0.0,0.05057791021402951,0.0,0.0,0.149696119525782,0.0,0.2408718760501445,0.037813970361849934,0.0,0.0,0.04837804337416969,0.0,0.0,0.05803619138636646,0.0408944170336859,0.0,0.05530860379172707,0.10155262002187576,0.27073754608543515,0.04439607418406005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046806774574458594,0.0,0.09483169246742512,0.05225847793970425,0.0,0.16878977180183566,0.0,0.0,0.1064357509531332,0.0,0.15928255106482295,0.05257250038163039,0.10425289290814753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102391381520735,0.17453720642007542,0.043145890519798884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03738678343827364,0.12929724730134853,0.0,0.14021732618134225,0.0,0.044448771739745936,0.05921633337613029,0.0,0.09000021380129224,0.09554472301840017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635275796864647,0.057657457655126185,0.0,0.0,0.21336829521694856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673129075790452,0.0,0.04082370792752559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056369867101975786,0.03586746610270973,0.0805129349925215,0.05632239542889767,0.0,0.05877369451512985,0.0,0.10105740020774548,0.0,0.0,0.11060341457167486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05069333808900717,0.0,0.05706865102115465,0.05064789001696072,0.0,0.053210349762631885,0.2371796701637861,0.0,0.05294539862859755,0.0,0.033909001848420765,0.0,0.10452610128303486,0.0,0.0,0.04520284860727854,0.0,0.16837166048610022,0.0,0.05356907348000214,0.042179213548911285,0.0,0.11043730955963256,0.0,0.0,0.043785131989679316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04227082465167978,0.0,0.0,0.05533505187420762,0.0,0.057898004691424636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939274252590534,0.042543992872933666,0.09252818468775127,0.0,0.06053129694043264,0.1843711722644936,0.07033010816447996,0.06783219084522649,0.10400902434913373,0.04202136087565297,0.06172907066871024,0.0,0.05017246977407591,0.05057791021402951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055103115506513235,0.06366956566651219,0.09143090765429808,0.0,0.04367368004123209,0.1873207156287812,0.1680568935215946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047762062040053566,0.0,0.18260437112720546,0.05102366718803671,0.0,0.038534452808080086,0.05375407572184798,0.0,0.07520143364016764,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imdeadfool23,2020/02/04,"I think I'm a stalker, and I feel disgusted about myself! I'm in love about this guy I met online. I'm a blogger, and he blogs too. We had few flirty chats, and as times goes on, I fall in love. And I haven't even seen his face. But who cares, right?

It was like September when I finally been able to get a photo of him. He's not handsome, to be honest. But it never changed the way I feel about him. His flaws made me even love him more. But darn, reality-wise, I think the feeling is not mutual. I know it. But we did have flirty chats before which made me think I can have a chance on him. 

Then he changed. Literally, every messages I send him is considered ""spam"". I never felt so low in life, and I pity myself. There was a time when I just keep sending him messages without a reply. I feel so pathetic, that I started deleting these messages for me to cover up my desperation. I'm crazy over this person. 

We still chat though. Like casual things. No longer flirt or anything personal. Something like ""got new phone"" or ""your website is down"" etc. He changed. To me, he became a mystery I need to find and solve. 

I know his location through Facebook and he mentioned it before. But not specific. Note that I am overseas. This guys is somewhere in the Central Europe. I'm in the Pacific. 

Now, one day, I Google search his location and last name and found a street view of a very familiar place. So I looked at his photos from previous smartphone reviews (yes, I save those kind of photos), and It's the same place. He also mentioned some details like his mom owns a cafe below their house. And so I confirmed it is his home. 

Hours later, I am crying because I realized, perhaps I am a stalker. I'm disgusted about what I did, and I can't literally find any reason for my behavior. I love him, and I won't cause any harm to him. I'm just curious about him. But again, I think it's stalking. Also, I feel so incapable without him. I have severe depression, by the way, and him entering my life is one of the best things ever. But he changed. 

Why do guys always make you fall in love with them, and leave you halfway through? I don't understand it. I am crying as I write this, so forgive if it's hard to understand. I literally out of my self. Thanks guys.",1.191390728476822,3.518349951434878,2.9213249448123615,90.25499403973512,83.70198675496688,6.096406181015452,23.1880353200883,7.404127859558343,1.0407150022075058,1740,64,364,28,50,575,224,453,0.092,0.759,0.149,0.9752,0,0,1,0,0,0,82.0,3,3,2,1,26,25,2,0,18,1,26,8,1,5,3,71,66,39,0,2,17,1,7,4,0,1,2,0,1,7,22,20,0,1,20,5,0,5,12,6,0,2,13,10,73,19,42,51,7,44,0,3,3,5,63,19,1,4,22,243,95,1,0.08028653230563049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841022175617506,0.06680482649829042,0.0,0.0,0.1091951902206658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606897523163792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048941924900861314,0.0,0.13663585121914412,0.0,0.08425576236934487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185747050247433,0.08247638462105045,0.33973002226031945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638197154523044,0.05177817139803248,0.0,0.06915067262983131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895407063071312,0.10605699477509806,0.07262376496116292,0.06764486619723821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20297641537052996,0.0,0.07708766162297609,0.08794997176612265,0.14676087202835206,0.0,0.0,0.08803003866021543,0.0,0.0,0.04194639942527334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421247419911866,0.0,0.0,0.317985158452808,0.0,0.0,0.07192096306376652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053393806626205,0.0,0.07906606183068231,0.0926398788045294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136235885657344,0.0,0.08360606857185629,0.08824675696192444,0.06544423952981095,0.0,0.08501184525155027,0.0,0.0,0.11341750424461765,0.1568957770205569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674204664568686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3623086500066733,0.1519381162294522,0.053591883749148916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940306162901166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059531446397668074,0.1238438464436395,0.07754123319782708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880846424416564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402062064267244,0.16776467628410913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254792691326115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856425991084883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375636303684486,0.09070092885251192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061808495013951914,0.0,0.0,0.056827220798439215,0.0,0.0641169284096182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391705211122256,0.0,0.0,0.10667760914012522,0.20577747229343984,0.07888111035329229,0.0,0.09363144526920596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16716222317359658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624479743801194,0.0,0.12745542462747667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244610763457543,0.0,0.0,0.15478670422208246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,randomisawesome,2020/02/04,"Trouble being able to seek help I suppose this may need a bit of context. So I was raised in a space where mental health was very often belittled and stigmatized. And as a result I started repressing any and all mental health issues that I experienced and never was able to seek help. 
I'm now no longer in that environment and have slowly started accepting that I probably need to seek help. The issue is that now whenever I try to speak to anyone about my mental health (be it a friend or a therapist) I immediately shut down and feel an extreme sense of shame, as well as have the feeling that my problems are not significant enough or worth wasting peoples time over. 
Has anyone else had such a feeling. How did you manage to get over it?",7.047887323943662,7.00408121830986,7.3705281690140865,73.83424295774651,64.28169014084507,10.198591549295775,33.24295774647887,9.827888789773867,3.137166197183099,591,22,107,11,8,193,90,142,0.138,0.726,0.13699999999999998,-0.2893,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,2,9,0,13,3,0,2,2,23,22,13,0,3,3,0,3,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,8,6,0,1,4,0,1,0,3,4,1,0,5,5,10,3,17,14,3,14,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,4,6,78,18,1,0.2765500903324236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403177236636463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19337025327030785,0.14167912436162536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15096053639878942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551105717011223,0.0,0.0,0.1428750849061768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20974805260882454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068309568893352,0.0,0.07224300400732178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4409397209371925,0.0,0.0,0.27804854418616304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28864644433790504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4180461686694866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20505838782802127,0.1066462392183222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958625058663812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908388575270465,0.13231054377131046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19574357733279274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160547984986147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062929081487541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938796790555103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409139359634868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432587176976267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Holy_Badger,2020/02/04,"I'm alone, please let me vent to the endless void I don't really have anyone to talk to, but I have things I wish I could say.

​

I take bipolar medication to help me deal with high levels of depression and anxiety, and it supposedly helps keep my ADHD in check as well. When I was younger I had obsessive compulsive tendencies, though those have become more manageable as I've grown up. I have low self confidence. I struggle to pick up on social ques and often don't understand how to respond to people's emotions. I work in a small retail store and when customer's make jokes or imply things I often don't know what they mean, though I have learned to fake empathy and normality for the sake of trying to blend in with people, and to keep my job. Perhaps it's my anxiety forcing me to find a reason, but I'm starting to feel like I must have be on the autistic spectrum or something like that, why else would I feel so alone, other than the real possibility that my mental disorders have left me emotionally stunted in the ways I interact with other people. I'm miserable, and I wish I had someone I could tell that to without feeling embarrassed, shameful, or scared that they might say something shitty to me or give me unwanted advice and then mad because they went and said something shitty or gave me some stupid advice. I'm grateful for my few friends, but it feels like most people just aren't equipped to deal with someone miserable in a way that won't make them more miserable, so I don't want to open up.

​

And so here I am in the endless void of the internet, in a moment of melodrama in my seemingly endless misery. I have never vented to the internet before, this will be new to me. I hope that if anyone reads this that at least someone finds in entertaining.",9.551379310344828,7.119131149425293,9.293057471264367,69.75768965517243,60.7816091954023,12.498390804597705,39.86666666666667,10.93419730881044,4.241913563218391,1432,58,264,28,15,467,180,348,0.179,0.6779999999999999,0.14300000000000002,-0.9371,1,2,3,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,4,1,13,21,2,8,12,0,27,2,0,5,2,61,53,30,0,11,11,0,4,3,1,5,2,3,0,1,18,15,0,2,12,3,3,2,8,13,1,0,6,7,40,8,47,37,6,32,0,5,0,0,20,21,0,13,10,184,58,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302518548070924,0.16753959704167815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17757117311494727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18576671447043808,0.20833131361480026,0.0,0.0,0.1311592827889224,0.0,0.0,0.11988228531174056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05225736436671236,0.09467688984506367,0.07294594028716937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368893979892014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675809827292618,0.07383509952132561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824865295441007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161251163575166,0.19285891171079533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17338120668286622,0.12248438311865285,0.0,0.0,0.15670279376827426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623117587807432,0.0,0.0,0.08223554613833656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491976089360592,0.09057351583793832,0.0,0.08514459360693953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506916055407199,0.15239322100183322,0.0,0.0,0.04711239844040992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314081986425876,0.08765995610239215,0.0,0.12564319554200976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444464441685576,0.0,0.0,0.0933800135968119,0.0,0.08635924934952563,0.0863909679631695,0.09094102610622604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611665786838054,0.08279405611592018,0.0,0.0,0.08399262037675262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23772459485600836,0.0,0.0,0.09410066747616463,0.0,0.09664242702225634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574852664159226,0.09757419109784032,0.05491784033558289,0.0881399148717813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154441797358249,0.13634444341574245,0.0858260083828904,0.0,0.0,0.07804111912990205,0.08943021326016569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738617640412645,0.2179043770577107,0.1979866373121769,0.0,0.0,0.06067682849064629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961872594697033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445477812032573,0.0689027715495188,0.07492771530017635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390419771795986,0.0,0.16844939931287006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058201870655746085,0.0,0.0,0.08924308987056813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05056301960973055,0.136089550600305,0.0,0.0,0.07707736520517942,0.07946823804066745,0.07735377493383888,0.0,0.19715979339785905,0.08263615722144947,0.0,0.06240905987717105,0.0,0.0,0.06089681353817258,0.0,0.20833131361480026,0.0
mentalhealth,the_unraveling_tape,2020/02/04,"No amount of sleep seems to be enough lately I wish I didn't have to be at work today. I wish I didn't have to go to class tonight. I just want to rest. Sometimes doing all of this is just exhausting and my lack of motivation alarms me because I know I need to get things done which gives me anxiety and it's a cycle. This post is pointless, but I thought maybe typing it out might help.. thanks..",1.2923192771084366,3.237457674698798,2.388780120481929,96.415218373494,80.68674698795179,5.595783132530121,20.01355421686747,6.6274283507984215,-0.02740843373493984,309,8,72,3,8,98,58,83,0.10300000000000001,0.8109999999999999,0.086,-0.09,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,1,0,11,2,1,1,1,17,22,3,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,4,0,11,1,11,15,5,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,3,50,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16307220770378988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12994465347565753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21814389938339987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22025854298171504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137098405732587,0.2044892557408532,0.12114774540460932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288137842192258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11715103438408113,0.0,0.2404617142325961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21415495058926892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261365506527884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806066452677506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20415510647795196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19405927384748484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133209939701714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108276604252092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19625557723754136,0.0,0.0,0.14161871423534114,0.0,0.0,0.16923082454847652,0.0,0.0,0.20205743585091454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573144745230616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4902631685102115,0.0,0.0,0.1551881492256506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anon---------------,2020/02/04,I’m traumatised 7 months on from when it happened any advice with coping would be appreciated. My dog is my best friend. One day a family member took him for a walk and let him off of a lead near a road. I was sat at home when I heard a loud knock on the door. I rushed to the door opened it and here was my dog with blood all over his face and body. I still picture his face like this daily. I sometimes don’t sleep because of this. Luckily he’s still alive and well but I still can’t get over that day. Any coping strategies would be appreciated. Thankyou.,1.5864341692789985,3.544323646551728,2.8658307210031384,93.298605015674,79.77586206896551,5.942319749216303,19.16614420062696,6.980632752743323,0.02138965517241376,437,10,100,5,11,141,78,116,0.02,0.812,0.168,0.9279,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,7,4,0,0,7,0,10,5,5,1,1,12,16,7,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,3,0,5,7,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,5,2,13,4,14,6,2,21,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,9,64,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19589560467710065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27265105710053844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220380342567105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103794373212785,0.0,0.0,0.2226754322984044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585713370319241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18898396341119744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548815501076224,0.0,0.10473657421861177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17727372897035235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20108636013969808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20499273496968412,0.0,0.0979388363462214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16001213120240446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584271769528591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20061338513310206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982685803700476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4802834705519877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227280009080433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18024535489398594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848142963600737,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GoodVibesGuy305,2020/02/04,"My first time So I finally broke down and made an appointment for counseling. I’m nervous, but I’m tired of hiding behind a fake smile. I’m not happy like I used to be.",0.33999999999999986,2.4711741111111145,2.9977777777777814,89.60000000000002,85.66666666666667,6.933333333333335,20.11111111111111,8.07648339933343,1.0492444444444442,132,4,29,3,4,46,30,36,0.455,0.475,0.07,-0.9501,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,5,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,3,2,5,4,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,16,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4264773879870977,0.0,0.33115256500707435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4144348400200939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19020046233746252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3683808513181147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22701368408653144,0.4474622472978848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33624460827171765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,youvenotgotasthma,2020/02/04,"abandonment panic hmm hi, so i have an online friend who i consider my best friend. i care about her so much, and shes the first person ive ever like opened up to during episode (last night).. she reassured me and was really sweet but i cant help but notice shes not tagging me in stuff n is posting about her best friend and its making me wanto cry because i feel like she doesnt care and is moving on from me to her other friedn. im glad she has a really close friend but its making me feel like shit for being so clingy. im really scared and i dont want to be crying + panicking on my 16th birthday

​

does anyone kno whwat i should do ?",2.2964698075646983,3.6691527810219,3.995739880557398,88.59801592568017,75.93430656934306,7.025613802256139,19.753815527538155,7.686295010490155,0.5172540145985405,509,10,110,7,11,171,86,137,0.17600000000000002,0.5660000000000001,0.258,0.9175,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,6,18,1,2,3,0,15,1,1,2,1,19,22,11,0,2,4,0,2,3,4,1,0,0,0,1,5,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,1,3,23,14,11,18,3,12,0,1,0,0,17,6,1,0,7,71,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414253177875492,0.15860388292413566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126710533500113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956769202028527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739588426372005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661607615840153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28675427904133444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11422454671600762,0.0,0.15297598807466015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118068616538654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13199615616507634,0.18649619611293705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102570322933188,0.0,0.0,0.4033775425356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748910562787464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819818566171089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639645060871188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913058419321896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742547931891485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13872892401130946,0.09595193471875267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249019982068556,0.0,0.0,0.1486051903538647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531446263219717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397063228399727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500822621108634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508556942659927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067971347384416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13398349086313266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14942151876655502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698786229803485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15860388292413566,0.0
mentalhealth,Miss_Minus,2020/02/04,"What is the thing you can always count on? For me it's my cats. Whenever my BPD flares up and I either want to cry my eyes out or watch the world burn, my cats are there for me, oblivious to my struggles. They just look at me with their big eyes, stretch themselves out as far as they can and plop down on my lap. And it calms me down so much, just sitting in silence giving ear scratches and listening to their purrs.

I have 5 total now, 3 of my own and 2 fosters. It makes me so happy coming home to all of them.

What is the thing for you that you can always count on, no matter your state of mind? Is it a person, a movie, a song, or a game? A special place in your area you like to go to?",1.969975594874924,2.7719580536912787,3.235009151921904,95.99508846857842,75.84563758389262,6.223550945698597,20.92800488102501,6.1124844417494595,-0.11610604026845685,526,11,130,3,11,171,91,149,0.051,0.8320000000000001,0.11699999999999999,0.8482,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,6,5,0,6,5,0,1,8,0,8,3,3,1,2,20,15,11,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,1,9,9,0,0,0,2,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,8,25,4,26,15,5,22,0,0,4,0,15,17,0,2,2,95,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3955954648480028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993934325028016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204770226531588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26111851374252226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280376691694349,0.13509878251114404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530517940416746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23844729741329765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613542968471775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996205376639714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15867645554297813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400241538689194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17474770851366214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075633689707078,0.2483613407086135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485110920830185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158542622496097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402103309264241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blinkbaby76,2020/02/04,"Should my Hubby take this further? (Work related) After a challenging and stress related couple of weeks at work, countless mentioning his worries to management and  numerous requests for some holiday time denied,my hubby reached the point of no return and decided he needed to contact the GP, he was immediately signed off for 2 weeks as he is so run down. (He’s also unable to take breaks at work so said he had a dodgy stomach to get a minutes break yesterday) On letting his employer know he was answered with 3 quick succession messages which read “10 days with stress!” “So no upset stomach then?” “Drop it off we will deal with it” (his sick note) 
This added 3 fold to his anxiety and almost made him physically sick! I think this is disgusting and even more so when somebody is struggling with their mental health!! Take note that my hubby is one of the hardest/most valued/reliable workers they have! Shall we take this to HR? Advice from all angles welcome, thanks",5.870254969749353,7.5727363539325845,5.9915730337078665,76.49348746758861,67.48314606741572,9.072428694900607,32.23163353500432,9.466822959209583,3.1700280034572184,773,33,130,16,13,245,120,178,0.182,0.75,0.068,-0.9701,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,2,0,2,6,8,9,1,4,6,0,12,5,2,1,1,22,23,13,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,8,11,0,0,4,2,0,1,2,5,0,1,5,1,12,4,24,14,3,22,0,0,0,0,22,8,0,2,10,82,20,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15421622232885013,0.0,0.0,0.15803018742103872,0.0,0.0,0.12620560573924006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207290065884378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17462068947130288,0.0,0.10177843159194824,0.16270163390032036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423615102768097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245248198540953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677513040734051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673168899319028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137781776162186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14932956061727973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15904167083914414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11701875676870716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694038178336067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14918737599138365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785896686431067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501194023853636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615559842024693,0.1649838200581102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4746327468025665,0.0,0.0,0.14529600850420166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112228677400596,0.0,0.0,0.09202393006437112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253181368151025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34467634959005244,0.16027007214964129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,metluitoutkitai,2020/02/04,"balding is killing me hello guys, first of all I'm sorry for the potential english mistakes I'm going to make, I'm French.

I think it's the best place to talk about this, since this sub is mainly dedicated to self acceptance and overcoming baldness ( yes I used this word because almost nobody shaved his head by choice and it's mainly a constraint).

Despite any genetic predisposition, I think I'm balding, even though I'm only 21. I became self conscious about it a year from now. My hair has always been an issue, I was bullied in school because of my gingerness, so in order to avoid this complex I dyed my hair during high school. I know it wasn't a long term solution but I found it satisfying while I was doing it. At that time I needed to build some social confidence by making a lot of friends, getting my first girlfriends etc. Hence when I considered that I had accomplished all those social steps ( second year of college), I came back to my natural hair color. nobody noticed it because my hair became auburn or dark blond, and I was not a real ""ginger"" anymore. I was really satisfied to have overcome this huge insecurity, and I felt released at this time.

however 6 months later, I started noticing some thinning and some recession, and since then I became totally obsessed about it ( you what I'm talking about, all those pathetic situation where you know the exact Norwood stage of all the male you see everyday, the mirror issues and obsession etc). Indeed I definitely don't want to become bald, I want to enjoy my youth by being attractive which I finally succeed at, and successful but balding will very likely prevent me from doing it. Ironically, my life is objectively great, I have real friends that I can rely on, a great girlfriend, and wonderful parents. Furthermore, I'm doing extraordinarily great in law school since I have the best results among 300 students, and I'm valedictorian, so this allows me to apply to the best business law masters. Nonetheless, balding is destroying me, and I don't really have hope in the future, I'm starting to feel totally depressed and I have really dark thoughts. I hate the way I feel on a daily basis, I really can't stand it anymore, and I don't want to handle it aswell.

I guess some of you have gone trough this, so how did you manage it ?",8.427487373737371,7.709024652777778,8.702904040404043,67.64159090909092,61.73148148148147,11.465656565656564,37.691919191919204,10.735267742514802,4.157922222222223,1838,78,309,39,22,609,225,432,0.107,0.693,0.19899999999999998,0.9949,2,1,0,0,0,0,55.0,0,5,0,9,14,24,3,4,17,1,29,12,11,6,7,64,65,24,1,6,4,1,8,1,4,1,1,0,0,4,27,14,0,2,13,0,0,4,6,9,0,3,13,11,49,15,39,50,19,44,0,1,3,0,20,15,0,10,22,211,76,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709260856526636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236992609473239,0.0,0.0,0.05914578527026083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17251108297925785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687818333935278,0.0,0.15905692778499694,0.09605673390719842,0.0,0.0,0.27382377660456303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947589787986587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491119025284787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939995846881828,0.05744597565790911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795405331807796,0.0,0.08350936102817788,0.0952765434831416,0.0,0.147961287740793,0.0,0.09536328025819,0.1343928903472054,0.0,0.04544069621114639,0.0,0.04942973200957402,0.0,0.0,0.28766977437262753,0.09581244864871036,0.08611863701584642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586951966667407,0.08926114463481898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189355632744074,0.0,0.086385511661004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18155800094161356,0.0,0.0,0.096224630207706,0.0,0.09559805202993404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06143280980036695,0.042491450029601856,0.0,0.0,0.07696988138994475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394278817239767,0.0,0.0,0.11611258855084818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942238371182552,0.0,0.0,0.0644906453910484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19804256753326765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614818616358177,0.0,0.0,0.09657512265996547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087006029645464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19799252226881325,0.2228729052889621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640691495468334,0.06930758319333442,0.0,0.18146718195863154,0.0,0.0,0.2158391365799297,0.09776321810505303,0.0,0.17731952766414893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736106708830193,0.12312229474789008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981395466267932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145976452927532,0.08545221095191799,0.06904820454770237,0.10143130563251776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511822418576015,0.0,0.07176324445468214,0.15389981213402446,0.06903647643557062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943203628709643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201772328706547
mentalhealth,throwawayacc202042,2020/02/04,"What's wrong with me? (Brain damage or what????) This is a throw away account (my friends don't know about my suicide attempt)

I'm 16F (shy girl who doesn't talk often)
Since I entered the high school a year ago I went from straight A student to F, D and C student.  I daydreamed all day, couldn't focus in class (daydreamed or just blankly stared somewhere), forgetting things, getting distracted easily, forgetting to drink, eat go to the bathroom, not being able to sleep and couldn't make myself do anything. The only thing that saved me for failing a year in school was my hyperfocus (on studying sometimes) and my symptoms weren't so severe and some of then weren't daily at that time. Then I tried to commit suicide by hanging, my symptoms stayed the same for 8 months but not after I entered sophomore year. Now my symptoms are daily  and got worse. Here are new ones: 
I have often headaches, when i read i skip most of the text because for some reason i just have to skip the text (idk why) or i read the words physically but can't understand them but at same time can (idk how to explain), my hyperfocus is gone so i'm failing most of my classes in school, got more lazy, started to move constantly in class (feet,legs,toes, fingers,hands,scribbling or bouncing my body back and forth), i have constant brain fogs, when i want to do something i get distracted by something (usually daydreams) forget about it and never actually do it also there is  probably more things but i can't remember right now.

so do i have a brain damage from my suicide attempt???? but then again the symptoms started before that and stayed the same for 8 months after that.",5.994999999999997,6.7516162388535035,5.67758598726115,82.32051910828028,66.54777070063695,8.063439490445859,33.215923566878985,7.908726449838941,2.353989044585988,1305,55,243,14,20,403,167,314,0.138,0.823,0.039,-0.988,0,0,3,0,0,4,54.0,0,0,1,4,19,9,0,2,14,0,24,11,5,3,3,49,40,27,3,3,13,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,13,9,2,0,5,3,1,8,11,7,0,1,7,1,29,2,33,30,10,48,0,4,1,0,6,11,0,10,27,164,42,12,0.09368562818240576,0.0,0.0914236587916912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304665671635869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749203630097847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709528946126526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802073161966466,0.07203846520356018,0.0,0.05710988938143194,0.0,0.07971956931066464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406361299760487,0.0,0.3137524342471405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024817632720438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06041947975900756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177624912760522,0.0,0.09586378627331713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238128393647787,0.0,0.09789374798720116,0.0,0.05324370148220989,0.0,0.1498579104049576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09898400987262523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051487171158207966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253588429258106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14955794920433446,0.09957299631452292,0.0,0.0,0.0722561319900479,0.09048216349066787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348380625951262,0.07125214186880936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010089526409286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18742196168781605,0.0,0.0,0.0963244290908531,0.0,0.0,0.10612755380892126,0.08000701457819885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28444457207272256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058380932922588,0.0,0.07749771975305478,0.0,0.0937532868226532,0.0,0.0,0.14424754728097994,0.09265748180770904,0.0,0.1326223396495775,0.19971282874594526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30743061431638763,0.0,0.0,0.38950095707149984,0.0,0.07530095918449507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18672170546445854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925768638605073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636063918497079,0.0,0.0,0.09753004293901743,0.0,0.0,0.1031814836370658,0.0,0.05525821081291082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868475159212348,0.08453670756732133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954736589050037,0.0,0.1024305274011608,0.0,0.18099141883648373
mentalhealth,JangoSkett,2020/02/04,"If you really and truely have depression, u will have it until the day you die. If you know what it actually feels like, if you know the reasoning behind it, even if you don’t, but if u really deeply are touched in the brain with depression. There’s no over coming it. Sorry to be real with yall but there’s no over coming it. You just gotta take day by day, night by night, and set yourself short term goals. But if you really have depression, that’s shits for life",3.3349553571428596,4.397473656250007,4.6314880952380975,86.28375000000004,72.85416666666666,8.81904761904762,21.00595238095238,9.23628265651192,1.251257738095239,365,7,80,8,7,121,57,96,0.244,0.7390000000000001,0.016,-0.976,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,8,0,1,4,5,1,0,3,0,7,3,2,1,0,21,14,12,1,6,10,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,0,2,8,1,11,11,1,14,0,3,0,0,8,4,1,6,8,53,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.17183201955211036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19656733325785689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033605531562871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3406777205537194,0.0,0.4549811801036796,0.0,0.1827467920692224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630143956162416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890330688879506,0.1257940318739149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19354168752528844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12437292837787232,0.08602546568156559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33048472669446904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20042148382529554,0.3384106470583432,0.1810430844886465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807471023163258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971109747888216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13239281950646686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tablestory,2020/02/04,"Mental Health Documentary looking for stories Award-winning documentary filmmakers and a national media outlet have partnered with the mental health and suicide prevention communities to tell stories that shine a light on how we prevent suicide and cope with depression and hopelessness. 

We’re looking for 18 to 25 year olds who have struggled with thoughts of suicide or a suicide attempt and are comfortable documenting their journey through help-seeking and recovery to help others who may be going through similar experiences. If you’re 18 to 25-years-old and have a story that fits one of the descriptions below, we’d like to hear your story:

* People who have struggled with thoughts of suicide.
* People who have attempted suicide.
* People who have struggled or attempted suicide and have started, who are interested in starting, family counseling.
* People who are working as mental health and suicide prevention advocates in their communities.
* People who have lost a sibling to suicide.

Stories can be sent here: [http://preventiondocstories.com/](http://preventiondocstories.com/)",10.545532012897283,13.795066455089824,8.639161676646713,56.004537079686784,58.10179640718563,10.647443574389683,45.181483187471216,10.727762888450028,6.134493689543991,906,54,102,23,13,272,89,167,0.28,0.66,0.06,-0.9941,0,0,0,0,0,10,35.0,2,1,2,5,2,9,0,3,7,0,16,3,0,1,0,24,26,14,9,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,3,1,0,1,11,14,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,6,0,1,4,5,5,3,22,18,0,13,0,3,3,0,18,6,0,4,5,75,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821925717593252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747780947004176,0.07466754176068878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04501409720919978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525740288001267,0.08926993111619516,0.0,0.1061790499887285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03869562274426008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302471155308185,0.0,0.08646174914617405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394604070163809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16622490764602965,0.0,0.053671441816090265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745543003710987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212358876086563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24840717840665905,0.0,0.7797379505562224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922876941733436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576004219601966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05766227354564912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051005502965508216
mentalhealth,amandarparker,2020/02/04,"Journaling? Journaling to feel better?

Does anyone here journal for mental health? What benefits do you see? I used to journal so much as a teenager, now I’m 30 and I feel my life is out of control. When I say out of control I mean internally, on the outside I’m sure everything appears as it should. Id say the downward spiral started 7-8 years ago and has gotten worse. I’m extremely irritable, and have recently been on a path to change this. I have been meditating regularly, though not long. I’m inconsistent with workouts, and I’ve read so many times the benefits of journaling. 
But every time I sit down to write, I have no clue what to write about/ where to start. Are there any prompts you have, or things you try and cover each time you write? Any insight is greatly appreciated!",2.1280116959064337,4.833774842105264,3.695438596491228,83.60862573099416,83.47368421052632,7.061988304093567,26.207602339181285,8.167268648758528,2.062963742690059,624,27,119,14,18,206,99,152,0.057,0.8420000000000001,0.1,0.7616,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,4,0,3,9,5,0,0,5,0,12,2,0,3,1,25,25,13,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,5,9,0,2,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,5,12,5,19,21,2,20,0,0,1,0,9,7,0,2,11,72,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479028227193955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269280028859312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11666568726687652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14756563011905116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650561191416084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3742738484105596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460119195898272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057866798532426,0.0,0.14995439138338534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687291628134818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18395316783981253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735418527030616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785138007693455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476573638034829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16916012917050546,0.0,0.1817490121235688,0.0,0.0,0.16814597127281852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226542505918254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16689556370650382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16474465248669054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26537228840364024,0.0,0.0,0.1329581758619582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361951602316469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572545383541183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108479995588352,0.0,0.16392968226644136,0.0,0.2918754503654372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328047713827627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410518447696855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003482386566984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074461946747712
mentalhealth,bluelephnt,2020/02/04,"Anxiety/Panic Attacks I’ve been managing to control my anxiety for the past year and having very few panic attacks, but recently in the past week I’ve been having a few really big ones, I’ve not told my manager about them cause they’ve not affected me at work yet (I’m a barista) but I’m terrified that I will eventually have one on shift and no one will realise or be able to help.",6.629177215189872,5.4017964430379735,7.9454113924050676,73.27482594936713,65.58227848101265,12.456962025316455,36.20569620253164,11.698219412168324,4.19960506329114,305,13,62,9,4,106,54,79,0.19399999999999998,0.742,0.063,-0.8675,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,2,2,3,2,1,4,0,8,0,0,3,0,10,11,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,3,0,5,0,7,5,2,10,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,6,39,6,3,0.2074067679817946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15866560980878444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4719102815849858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21306388354097355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326243264470311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902038463116465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4216325811414274,0.0,0.0,0.2433471539420249,0.0,0.0,0.39598645720719866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287008652295956,0.0,0.20478916164309469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981860550283807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711323049789157,0.0,0.0,0.1663691986916089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15099459729343104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335631584822748
mentalhealth,Jumpymeat468,2020/02/04,"Do a lot of people have the mental illness gene but don’t have a mental illness? If you have a parent with a genetic mental illness but don’t have the illness yourself, you are probably a carrier of the gene. For instance, my mom has a diagnosed anxiety disorder. It’s so bad that it interferes with her everyday life. She struggled to hold down a job for years. Since I’m her child, I probably have the ‘anxiety gene’ although I probably will never have develop anxiety during my lifetime.",4.184758064516128,6.374717516129032,6.072782258064518,72.22917338709678,72.76344086021504,10.241397849462368,35.280913978494624,10.411451182825502,4.591388172043012,391,22,64,13,8,135,55,93,0.28600000000000003,0.7140000000000001,0.0,-0.9807,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,11,0,12,6,0,0,1,9,13,5,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,9,0,8,12,1,5,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,2,3,50,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38255927758734815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13918176912657934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691899796172742,0.0,0.0,0.1910447251563434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654171727410338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774026064909628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171650590019105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5039622906027847,0.0,0.0,0.19522893480560574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856398892900825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18509295197718376,0.0,0.0,0.11556400144295975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5391700404409006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13789024834220873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17426381281120748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734488606329914
mentalhealth,lovesprite,2020/02/04,"MY memory has become terrible. I used to listen to an audiobook in the evening and next day write detailed notes from previous day's session.

Nowadays I dont remember a single line from the audiobook. And my brain feels tired all the time.",4.395666666666667,6.7872431777777775,5.317500000000003,76.97625000000005,72.7777777777778,9.833333333333336,31.25,10.125756701596842,3.782000000000002,193,9,33,6,4,63,36,45,0.136,0.8640000000000001,0.0,-0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,2,2,1,1,1,7,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,5,5,2,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,21,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327482058053769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363363229700725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886108301917252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35310652892314004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19899745237409272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523399362254794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.320422513479819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3412998337324588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17568307597426974,0.34628548628675265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26021553413679643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,perse123kkk,2020/02/04,"What should i do? I constantly want to stab/shoot/kill somebody for no reason and im scared of myself because of it + im having lots of anxiety problems

I dont even know where they came from, when im in school i get annoyed by these little things and i really want to punch somebodys teeth after that.

I know i need help but i am scared of asking for it and im not good at talking to people",0.3590457516339889,2.3722382117647065,2.5309803921568634,93.7383006535948,84.52941176470588,5.189542483660131,18.8562091503268,6.42735559955562,-0.046712418300653084,308,8,69,3,9,104,58,85,0.19699999999999998,0.75,0.053,-0.8849,0,0,0,1,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,3,5,1,2,0,0,5,1,1,1,0,15,13,5,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,10,1,14,11,1,8,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,3,45,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12084763954173525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14768187446064404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09629786009965816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18067712417289836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17071089371294526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851412291117475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043385774684031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253350295726243,0.0,0.0,0.13249886161505456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588485653007736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.682544602958533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17363382975601724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832877908468618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430158063462586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713374388819857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951743383500084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15115723391734534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012004828352968,0.1624208433467261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31631373102438115,0.15987542557134246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269713759115805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494913616036593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18635117356571848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hospitalmusic_,2020/02/04,"How do I overcome fear about getting help? Advice or encouragement would mean so much to me I’ve struggled with my mental health since I was in elementary school but my mom was not open to me getting help so when I started university in September of 2017 I spent a few months hyping myself up and saw a councillor on campus. The school councillors only work with people short term so as per their recommendation I allowed them to refer me to a therapist I could see more long term as well as seeing a dr and then psychologist (also on campus). 
The only problem is that the “referral” they gave me was a short list of therapists in the city and I called the one they recommended specifically after several hours of panicking and working myself up to it and my call is answered and I’m told she isn’t accepting new clients... great.. 
I contact a few more people through the list: all full and full waiting list :( 

Through this set back I continued to see the school psychologist and dr alternate weeks while I was put on antidepressants for anxiety mostly (I don’t know if that’s my biggest problem but it’s what she helped me with). 

Whenever I had to see the doctor I left feeling work and like my feelings weren’t valid. I felt like she put words in my mouth and thought I was there for attention which made me feel like a terrible person or like I was imagining what I’ve been going through. Every time I saw the psychiatrist she would ask me if I had found a therapist yet bc I “need to get on that” and I know she was right. I was trying as best as I could but it’s so hard for me to talk to new people and especially hard to reach out when I was expecting to be turned down and scared they would be like the doctor.

Eventually the psychiatrist discussed it with me and convinced me to sign up for academic accommodations and made me an appointment to do so with the doctor. I went for that appointment and the dr more of less said I wasn’t “bad enough” to get accommodations. This felt like a huge setback and after what I’d call a “breakdown” I cancelled all upcoming appointments and stopped taking my medication. Looking back I can tell it did help and maybe I shouldn’t have stopped but I couldn’t keep seeing that dr and I couldn’t find someone to talk to like I was being told I had to. 

I go through short spurts (like this) where I’m able to tell I really just need to find someone to talk to but I don’t know how. I surf the Internet and find people nearby but I don’t know who I’m supposed to reach out to because they all specialize in different things and I don’t have a single clue what my goals are or what I need help with. 
How do I find someone when they all treat/work with different stuff I don’t know what is wrong with me? How do I do this when the only phone calls I’ll answer are my boyfriends and moms because I have so much phone anxiety? I don’t even know how to overcome my fears of not being worthy of therapy or being turned away to even look into help most days. 
I guess I would just like some advice on how I can overcome these fears and not let setbacks derail the process for me. I’m scared because if I manage to find someone to have an initial appointment with and they tell me I don’t need to be seeing them or that we aren’t a good fit I will never try again but I don’t know; maybe I don’t need help and I just feel like I do",4.3925660449423924,5.174931853587118,5.248675599974536,83.87778009421352,70.1420204978038,8.691692660258452,27.87857279266663,8.903607488879933,1.9432959068050164,2668,89,561,47,46,871,259,683,0.094,0.782,0.124,0.9625,5,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,9,5,30,29,0,6,30,0,62,10,1,9,5,129,119,65,0,20,21,2,8,10,0,6,9,1,0,1,26,40,0,4,27,0,1,5,20,11,1,1,31,19,95,18,80,71,22,63,0,0,10,0,46,30,0,12,37,390,121,14,0.05319246277482673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395811799426287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042537993263121465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138417685713867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04972777223980451,0.0,0.04997606976575002,0.08180344099812867,0.044413484566325885,0.09727689477883424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582220796801954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172618070678748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493970643121984,0.0,0.0,0.034304737987111804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114960432221216,0.0,0.1633342188230219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05496203328797817,0.0,0.07026623998541738,0.0,0.044816944059899166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795689270198338,0.10758282973452077,0.07600141206938567,0.1021462119118334,0.0,0.24308473656738536,0.0,0.0,0.058322789888033084,0.0,0.0,0.11116346544763596,0.0,0.06046100483143944,0.04461531407622192,0.0,0.05864487799513635,0.05859749471775098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529999716355407,0.0,0.0,0.056541100537942826,0.0,0.0,0.24957650584281266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0523838610275334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04727990496029807,0.0,0.0,0.20463230506575306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057793766443894785,0.05439289708687428,0.0,0.25987150456703084,0.0,0.0,0.047073655686534994,0.08933654373354802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066398883496984,0.0,0.0,0.10687795682049754,0.05794218586659439,0.0,0.053585810114731236,0.053605491476260266,0.0,0.0,0.12459673903129265,0.042457716301170144,0.0,0.07820516108541523,0.19720768574142766,0.04102530650325937,0.10274722402228642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03604458940797938,0.12136579465328586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14750782452957312,0.04644560676604405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017960061529926,0.0,0.10694623389100476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034076453724407436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04542607257102322,0.050598213050269764,0.0,0.1065098694755192,0.16150083641453666,0.2543250358809924,0.0,0.0,0.06009234230298297,0.0,0.04400135488308004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18027920437217845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03764989893212576,0.0,0.0,0.08894256136114195,0.0,0.055608311414124964,0.06089264369195688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039994112122998436,0.12826226005118127,0.13947767105370099,0.0,0.06083021695211247,0.1852816472708521,0.03533870868586311,0.0,0.0,0.042228873787463095,0.03101695280645583,0.0,0.0,0.1016553553885208,0.0,0.07222838115829662,0.11571624979762345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042667785118072635,0.0,0.047826412192537485,0.049309945904744704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15489898567699167,0.0,0.0,0.15114559755568954,0.05815760775157351,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jberry-93,2020/02/04,Prozac I will begin taking Prozac today and I’m very anxious about starting. I’ve heard so many bad things about it and am having a hard time justifying taking it or any other antidepressant. I absolutely have to do something to help stabilize my brain. So I’m looking for stories on what it has done to improve your life or what negative side effects I should look for in case it is not the one for me.,7.586624999999998,6.4597304125000035,7.845000000000002,74.44000000000005,63.625,10.5,35.0,9.516144504307137,3.089625,323,12,62,5,4,106,60,80,0.133,0.8,0.067,-0.6779,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,2,0,9,4,1,1,0,7,18,6,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,8,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,4,6,0,10,14,0,7,0,0,2,0,3,3,0,2,4,44,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16739623082935726,0.0,0.0,0.27808905487411706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055320773559305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747943114183778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25190562449481185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205096783138976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649948633071555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17386903839129425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4134223107384078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24956609734924315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668033798924331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895048504913458,0.0,0.0,0.1742322633614691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701611358311794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16353677893556828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14353700921713328,0.0,0.23332948895529976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031065540664955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stuntmcnuggetttt,2020/02/04,Best ways to deal with anxiety/depression ? For some time I’ve been extremely aware of how my mental health has been influences my everyday. I’m currently uninsured and unfortunately cannot get the medication needed. Everyday i’m stuck with the feeling of overthinking and over analyzing situations which often makes my heart rate soar. I want to know what over the counter or alternative medications can I use to help cope with what i’m dealing with ?,7.07929166666667,9.247959012500004,7.457500000000002,65.3441666666667,65.125,12.333333333333336,35.833333333333336,11.855464076750405,5.206333333333333,371,18,60,14,6,121,57,80,0.055,0.82,0.125,0.6868,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,5,4,1,4,0,17,16,4,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,5,1,12,13,2,7,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,4,35,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388397049659555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.469266744416108,0.19602132583771326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507539852201935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890540636495947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419155433384016,0.0,0.2696930339122838,0.1525475284882042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12507648619091294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15191684631736885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4585422018955724,0.22935530920023686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16875371718182688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558185975477207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327084708200893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19656307488596464,0.0,0.0,0.13423737770401434,0.18064886696350602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pleaseyourqueen,2020/02/04,"I don't know what to feel/do despite having all the concerns that caused me to relapse were resolved. I've been depressed and recently, there were signs of relapse. I'm doing better today but due to the fluctuations, people around me aren't sure if I'd be, overall, mentally okay.

Now the higher ups from my work who found out about my recent relapse and self hurt tendencies were suggesting if I should take few months off of work. Tbh, I don't want to take a medical leave because idk what I'd be doing if I took a break. Also, work distracts me from overthinking, especially when I'm extremely focused with it although they mentioned that it contributes to my stress when deadlines are coming due.

I impliedly told them I don't want that option so I was told to reduce my load. Now I know they do it out of concern but I feel incompetent due to the load reduction - that I can't finish my own work and they would rather have me distribute some of it to others. They were persistent so I agreed but the reduction should be based off what I'm willing to give up doing - i.e. fairly insignificant load reduction.

To give a heads up on what makes me feel like relapsing, I think it is due to the following factors:

1. Talking with people whose mental health is worse than mine - For example, receiving texts from my best friend that she wants to die, hearing others cuss while engaging in conversations with me, etc. I realized that this has a huge impact on my then declining mental health as I'm taking in all their emotions. I guess this was the reason why my psychiatrist didn't want me to join a depression support group during my worst relapse since hearing their experiences will worsen my suicidal tendencies. As at date, those kinds of conversations stopped.
2. I have a suspended (because guys were harassing me, to say the least) other reddit account where I post some nsfw stuff. I started posting only this January 2nd/3rd week on this one subreddit (mainly audios) and I got top 1, 2, and 15 post of the month on all 3 of my posts per my last checking before my account was suspended. It made me feel like I was in uni all over again where I felt pressured and stressed out thinking what would others say if I won't do well. I got ridiculed in uni when my grades weren't always the highest so I worked harder to be consistently at the top, or at least within that range. Now with this subreddit, because I got top posts on all my posts, I felt the same pressure. And it was affecting my focus in everything - I was paranoid that I won't be enough and people won't like me if I won't make a top post. Getting suspended is a blessing in disguise since I had time to breathe and realize that I shouldn't be worried over a popularity of some reddit posts.
3. In line with number 2, I've been stressing myself out to obtain donation funds to be donated for mental health organization who I haven't chosen yet. I panicked that I won't reach my goal of $1k (net of any charges) because it doesn't make sense to me why anyone would support me and my cause and advocacy (mental health awareness), considering that the general public lacks concern for mental health. I put immense pressure to myself and I set myself up for failure. I'm 23 and it's the only thing I think I can do to help people volunteering in spreading mental health awareness. Fortunately now and after the 2 weeks of posting on that audio subreddit, I got a few people and have a gross amount of $992 for donation (to be deducted by $120 for charges and fees - i.e. $870 net).

Now the thing is, I feel 'okay' now since those cases that makes me relapse were, in essence, partly resolved. But when they (work people) told me to try working less - working is something I'm very much committed to do and I'm willing to work 24+ hours of shift with or without paid overtimes -, it just left an unexplainable feeling inside of me. I just don't understand myself and all I know is I don't want to feel pitiful. I know I'm not making sense. I just can't explain what I'm feeling rn.

To summarize it all... I'm ""tired"" and don't understand my head/brain... again. I don't know what to feel/do.

Sorry you read up to this point...",5.554018924771677,6.19528787025704,6.1504742962056325,78.9507015582337,67.48225214198287,9.22219188400339,31.74581018736465,9.265573868473778,2.7271222295452406,3318,131,631,60,52,1081,341,817,0.145,0.7559999999999999,0.099,-0.9914,0,0,1,0,0,0,104.0,0,1,8,20,27,33,2,7,28,2,71,10,2,10,9,113,136,43,2,18,17,0,9,3,1,14,8,7,0,2,49,31,0,1,26,1,9,5,22,15,1,1,30,16,94,18,98,84,26,92,1,4,0,0,35,42,0,12,37,425,143,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03833811433023148,0.039890454841918735,0.0,0.0,0.03260128072156332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03352121177458578,0.0,0.0,0.04267733565718268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689668231886495,0.0,0.04079395560576658,0.0,0.05031074639572334,0.04239960226313543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053517611733872435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849649100832343,0.0,0.04129661839053825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258240993707791,0.0,0.04975481786051268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05392676995823488,0.0,0.049535498841768166,0.053466488705715465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043085958072598934,0.04689514726157925,0.0,0.0,0.21816206283741732,0.0684976088822985,0.09206106941746588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05256443981629901,0.03703882132235827,0.0,0.025047006926928732,0.09197806499379207,0.0,0.0,0.15337004444691518,0.0,0.05281202237393512,0.047468773098253314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840185975959964,0.30575196578349817,0.10806517619328744,0.0,0.03213360199116975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0472118757626876,0.0,0.051321449118647416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04992280165507715,0.13173461627153202,0.039078022030256204,0.0,0.050762218117906974,0.052087648135993536,0.0,0.0,0.07026412876343344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04536259490451836,0.16000375501637532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048295153510160886,0.3381902417829325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653152661369098,0.0,0.03524188821462527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032485819938934304,0.07292203752092141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051915043834014414,0.0,0.19941603050376894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04531940276252374,0.0,0.4132249497894509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04819358681002514,0.0,0.0,0.04795361572290655,0.0,0.0,0.04929096479146936,0.0946712013465302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762486459136516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05001254538891905,0.0,0.0,0.11897098415701032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03690704861368218,0.0,0.053665624101412734,0.03393263337207971,0.0,0.0,0.040080523606214766,0.16474753135498602,0.0,0.05488056574018518,0.05243928159974194,0.10880494552909653,0.04518348801755832,0.0,0.10813619017873932,0.03853287232490096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06369926505470262,0.09215528349080858,0.0,0.0,0.0279545740560409,0.0551007159753562,0.045442123352257585,0.1374280145184065,0.0532638175650146,0.0325485492181762,0.0,0.0,0.09981579871256366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039556050651230926,0.1413831646512931,0.0,0.07691018304300619,0.0,0.04310439487120578,0.0,0.08651794597936033,0.0,0.0,0.04621306841548658,0.0,0.31411222711009124,0.04868604935412115,0.0488556101916847,0.102166970426145,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uckedupthrowaway,2020/02/04,"I'm so slow at doing so many things: it's an handicap, others dislike me for this and I'm scared of life. 26F from the EU (pardon my awkward English).

I am slow (and perfectionist) at anything that has to do with cleaning: taking a shower, washing the dishes, cleaning myself when I go to the toilet, washing and preparing vegetables. Common things that needs to be done every day or so.

I'm also slow at eating, for some reason. First few bites, when I'm hungry, I'm fast as anyone else. Then I have to stop for a bit (because I feel full), take another bite, stop again, take another bite, and so on until I'm done. I'm **always** the last one to finish eating when I'm in a group of people, **by far**.

I'll describe my issue in more details in the following paragraphs, that you can of course skip.  
**WARNING**: it's quite long, and may be **disgusting** to read for many of you (especially because I'm a girl and you probably can't imagine a girl like this lmao)

| -------------------------**DESCRIPTION START**\---------------------------- |

Because I'm so slow with cleaning activities, I try to do them as least as possible. If I'm home alone all week, I shower once (only wash my armpits if they smell). If I have to go to work, I shower only on Wednesday and Sunday (armpits every day especially during summer).  
When I was 14-15, I had medical problems because of the fact that (for several years) I had been trying to go to the bathroom as least as I could. I ended up having a [fecalith](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fecalith) in my intestine, causing me some serious pain. To get rid of it I had to take medicines and do enemas (**horrible**). After this experience, I understood that I couldn't continue like that, and started going more often.

But **why** does it take me so long to do this stuff, you may wonder.  
I feel like I have to, uhm, use lots of toilet paper to clean over there. I, uhm, ""iterate"" the process many times. For the 'big one': after cleaning as usual, I also clean *the hole* with wet paper (not all wet, just the center). I do this until basically I see no dirt on it. Takes quite some time...  
You see, in my country we have [bidets](https://www.deghishop.it/files/deghi_Files/Foto/1160595_5.JPG) in every bathroom. I use it only before sex (amazingly, I'm in a relationship lol) or (sometimes) when I'm on my period. And, of course, I ""use"" it to dampen the toilet paper as I said before; that's my main use lol Speaking of periods... that's when I **really** waste tons of time in the bathroom lol Like, even **an hour**, if I can.  
If this wasn't disgusting enough for you to read, consider this: to ""properly"" clean my privates, when I was a teen, I realized I had to clean my pubic hair too, right? Well, by doing that, with toilet paper, I accidentally developed a form of [trichotillomania](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trichotillomania). Recently I started to completely shave my privates, just to stop wasting time doing this...

Let's talk about showers now (less disgusting, I promise). I used to be in the shower for 45 minutes. I looked up if other people do this, and it seems like everyone who does this, it's because they **like** being in the shower for that much time, they find it relaxing, etc. (many masturbate in there lmao)  
This is **NOT** my case, in fact I hate it, as I said, because it takes so much time for me.  
Now I can manage to take a shower in 30-35 minutes, but if I need to shave it's, of course, even more.

Many times I've been asked why it takes so long for me, what the hell I do there. Well, I don't know how **you** can take a shower in 5 minutes.  
Here's what I usually do: 1) Wash with water. 2) Apply shampoo on hair (until I can feel lots of lather) and soap (liquid, ofc) on my face (rubbing carefully every spot, like behind the ear). 3) Wash (or I can't see because of soap in my eyes lol). 4) Apply soap mostly everywhere else. 5) Wash. 6) Soap on armpits and feet. 7) Wash. 8) Armpits + privates. 9) Finally, last wash.  
(When I was even slower, I used to apply shampoo twice and have like three more ""wash"" steps).  
I feel like, if I don't do like this, I don't clean properly. It's ironic because, in a way, I want to clean myself very well, but at the same time most people shower way more often than me (every day). But it seems I'm unable to this cleaning stuff differently, once I go about doing it :|  
Taking into account the time pre-shower and post-shower, I need about 1 hour and 20 minutes to have a shower. More, if I need to shave.

As for washing dishes, similarly, if you wash some dishes in 5 minutes, it would probably take me half an hour. Again, I have my personal ""technique"".  
1) Wash the dishes with water, preferably until you can't **see** any dirt on them. 2) Rub them carefully (not quickly) with the sponge (with liquid soap on it, ofc). 3) Wash.  
Why do I try to remove visible dirt before using the sponge? Because otherwise, I feel, the sponge would take the dirt and move it on the dishes while supposedly cleaning them. Doesn't feel right to me.

To be honest, when I see dishes/flatware at other houses, sometimes I can see a little dirt on them (I have very good eyesight.. unfortunately lol). So these people are faster than me, but I guess their method is not as good as mine and/or they do it too quickly.

| -------------------------**DESCRIPTION END**\---------------------------- |

Why is it an **handicap**? Because it eats lots of my time, of course. Other people, in a day, can work for 8 hours (9 including lunch break), take care of their life and have some time every day to do something they like, such as playing a videogame for 2 hours. **I can't**. Because of this, living on my own and working is **awful**, it's like prison. I can only work and survive. This is why I'm **scared of life**, at least adult life. And having kids? I can't even imagine how could I do everything I need to do if I had kids. Impossible for me.

Why do **other people dislike me** for this? Well, even if I try to explain them (in much less detail lol) why it takes so much time for me to do things, they don't seem to fully understand. They seem to think that I like being slow, because it's more relaxing or I don't even try to be faster. I also find it hard to be on time for appointments, of course. When I'm with my family I hate doing stuff like washing the dishes, and from their point of view I am just lazy and selfish.

Even going to therapy is difficult, because it takes time! And money :| At the moment, I would have to use my mother's money to do it, and even if she can afford it and would gladly help me with this (she's a psychologist herself and thinks I need therapy really bad lol), I don't want to do it, especially considering that there's no guarantee that it's going to work. I think I need a therapy that goes really deep, until the thing(s) that makes me feel the need to do things the way I do them.. are gone. I don't think cognitive behavioral therapy would work. I've seen three therapists in the past, by the way (one was 'free', paid by the state). For reasons, I stopped seeing them after a while (two of them were particularly bad). I don't know if I'll go to other therapists, maybe. But it certainly feels like another burden for me.

I don't know why I'm posting this. Just to vent, I guess. Sorry for such a long post. Anyone else has/had similar issues? I've never seen anyone like this.",1.0047258445016922,3.5872174406424584,2.5892932816163494,89.71393174515877,89.67737430167597,5.425976206327611,19.430862303528528,6.986614945454411,0.5412843112281824,5693,172,1126,88,193,1855,440,1432,0.094,0.847,0.059000000000000004,-0.9903,15,1,2,0,0,0,523.0,1,9,19,10,61,51,6,3,57,8,106,47,11,14,6,160,216,96,0,34,32,1,15,16,0,7,21,4,23,6,84,39,13,4,31,5,5,13,24,17,4,9,22,32,151,35,178,175,38,166,1,0,12,2,49,53,1,39,108,741,235,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0316430349709803,0.0,0.07329814330632435,0.0254220143290649,0.0,0.0,0.020776655190667792,0.0961104526238324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408876981510113,0.06260901481487273,0.02514199232428687,0.0,0.028562336054041213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05101989549811209,0.2421176875595389,0.0,0.07799343437362162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03335526847176412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345051385358348,0.03138569384203803,0.0,0.0,0.032033572348538666,0.0,0.0,0.04878715313689756,0.0,0.0,0.09851873616102014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03192071761846952,0.0,0.0,0.05347315921288492,0.06253135180867729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378808726848743,0.07656773913127041,0.0,0.05412065212598262,0.031568759151612516,0.03407396198885021,0.16143638609339708,0.0,0.1544501061878703,0.02919409307437068,0.02745849471618645,0.02988607451010285,0.02880204966828624,0.0,0.1235855457873276,0.06547984479294232,0.0,0.033468621350830716,0.05584861434744244,0.02598782519253617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015962349176511483,0.0,0.13890890022845478,0.05125174671635983,0.0,0.0,0.06731374685285467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02736891702898157,0.060328268306881726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02047860555867988,0.0,0.030646512158053908,0.0,0.15043962106942788,0.03525332599242438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377746048064614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050372340687920826,0.04980850882455881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03124186215413477,0.08632015287539846,0.2388214684870675,0.030621495100592026,0.026978297138382117,0.10815152277702966,0.025656290932551326,0.0,0.0,0.0779235818752561,0.0,0.0,0.02039394019872665,0.15487650845590326,0.030693956133358014,0.0,0.0,0.03077829243675386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032472327771773744,0.0898380116973781,0.181233526100418,0.02356386659381029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650745410318873,0.062109217599932966,0.09294579819197184,0.03250986937508247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029165688489641163,0.12708697368837046,0.02667714576652057,0.0,0.0,0.028881859356560933,0.0344431998088574,0.08778215771420914,0.0,0.0658812316479706,0.02923448614066098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649923997121713,0.06112126376444016,0.0,0.05871788010809564,0.06282583731812341,0.030166773564238386,0.03280180501001211,0.0,0.05218310380493045,0.05812458912924993,0.0,0.06117649249118675,0.0,0.1704239492414566,0.11125489879839333,0.0,0.034515474911188664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023520702444198884,0.060434138393568676,0.03420087011519026,0.06487536142867581,0.0,0.0,0.10217257732171853,0.0,0.0,0.10492544149945833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675452067730354,0.02455683286304043,0.0,0.0,0.13975716349792394,0.07094729880486343,0.10148816523833233,0.07830688474846133,0.0,0.0,0.24941460784154665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371524815821692,0.0,0.029845220174998976,0.031806088388735415,0.0,0.21109946351190792,0.06729822503396991,0.05041779996953478,0.0360411517180969,0.09700417772298778,0.024507263493467126,0.0,0.10988097763276916,0.0,0.2205500509958855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03313273545822766,0.1334549091200273,0.0,0.0,0.10851761390134428,0.0,0.0,0.01967472070363412
mentalhealth,thisdude1996,2020/02/04,"Is a label on mental/emotional illness necessary? I've been going through some deep shit for the last couple of years. At first I thought it was severe anxiety, but a therapist told me it was actually angst, so I went with that. I asked my psychologist if going to a psychiatrist was necessary for my situation, he said no. In fact, he told me that I might be diagnosed with some sort of depression disorder, but meds wouldn't be needed. I feel empty all the time. There's something lacking inside of me, and I feel that no drug or diagnosis will solve that. I have doubts though, am I wrong? Can I trust myself and my therapist on this?",4.626260162601625,6.031713739837401,5.9530081300813045,76.72430894308944,70.13821138211382,10.019512195121953,29.11382113821137,10.25414643259724,3.0638065040650404,502,19,96,14,9,169,85,123,0.242,0.708,0.05,-0.9733,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,1,1,5,0,13,4,1,0,2,21,24,8,0,4,4,0,2,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,7,4,0,0,3,0,0,3,3,4,0,1,9,3,16,1,13,10,4,12,0,1,0,0,6,5,1,7,4,70,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.1637857423955971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839566181170442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569059361098976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18570962873168606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445586811149343,0.17035210497470202,0.0,0.0,0.1923569655148401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19463887258408707,0.0,0.0,0.18879523491481034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697279392232137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276297399415033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19077248253700047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13681042559979506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864302559801931,0.0,0.1691412955350766,0.1780496657874461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444979996331665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15965243618506053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18960924242929664,0.17228336381016934,0.0,0.18865701937342885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920994375203487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3897458636570684,0.0,0.0,0.16490004860248228,0.13324467745178567,0.09786772654733747,0.0,0.0,0.32075293099602725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558756954568118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18350457853144214,0.0,0.10808221231847427
mentalhealth,introvertalert,2020/02/04,"Is it generally best to see your old therapist for recurring issues or a new one? I worked with a therapist for about 9 months last year on some pretty deep anxiety and depression. Now there is a life situation that is triggering my anxiety again and I feel like I am getting out of control about it again. Is it generally best to call up your old therapist to see if you can get in, or work with a new therapist? The issues I am having sort of stem from what I worked on with my old therapist but aren't the exact same thing again.",6.018535825545173,5.674837037383182,7.1350934579439285,75.67061526479753,66.47663551401868,11.993146417445484,31.852024922118375,11.538034831475384,3.6171071651090334,421,15,87,13,6,143,66,107,0.049,0.86,0.091,0.6553,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,6,7,4,0,0,6,0,9,1,0,2,1,19,14,6,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,10,3,18,14,4,19,0,1,2,0,4,6,0,5,14,65,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17514503302855985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24026740420188503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168910464055696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839264724067515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859653597786973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05788163926580826,0.08178045377589961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961618080608236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389628293381624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331182289269176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085657458196957,0.05592635449329576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913722840367266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211199601682484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3603645238661851,0.0,0.07757073974518762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646150451263194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824423720086602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867389529751516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6645673537540339,0.07605162992355362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250015933780137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371768788450353
mentalhealth,windwalker77,2020/02/04,"idk I called out from work to get high.

feel anxious angry sad fatigued.

I recently got in contact with a therapist but I often find myself rejecting their words.



sometimes i dont want to do anything but sit and forget everything.",3.1339534883720934,6.0558479767441895,4.2291162790697685,80.05948837209301,80.86046511627906,7.1609302325581385,29.53023255813953,8.238735603445708,2.796175813953489,185,9,30,4,5,60,37,43,0.36,0.64,0.0,-0.9059,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,11,6,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,6,0,6,5,0,5,0,3,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,19,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198331221603501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329749749380255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890864268959802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318021955037247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544405405835671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14314865674294533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25875693063811145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791301545969496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264285092178113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991207034889791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795364513853767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800025092689664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32871192043553565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698530311279472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20610706917844812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flowerlaboratory,2020/02/04,"feeling confused and tense after taking zolpidem anyone has any experiences with zolpidem? i started taking it yesterday together with fluvoxamine because i had an episode and was taken to urgent care where they prescribed me these. i woke up feeling normal and weirdly well rested, but i tried taking a nap and now im a little dazed, slow, and my muscles feel tense especially in my jaw. is this normal for sedatives?",6.313558558558563,8.736301527027027,6.60108108108108,69.70315315315315,67.51351351351353,7.636036036036036,35.306306306306304,8.344100000000001,3.397268468468468,339,17,47,5,6,109,57,74,0.134,0.764,0.10099999999999999,-0.5378,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,1,3,0,4,1,1,0,0,14,14,6,0,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,4,3,8,2,7,10,1,9,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,5,35,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814863371584004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16261121420127628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176629096671714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371102077525565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274881017915495,0.0,0.0,0.3527676561854237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512044833619447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23308600773574595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4557184390635906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16460701811096187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5245680646126406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15789283348254005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20909918276677966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xDixieBiscuit,2020/02/04,"Will medication really help me? Hey, r/mentalhealth. 

My whole life I've struggled to focus. Reading, writing, gaming, socializing, all of it. I've read entire books and have been completely unable to tell you details about the book just a few days later. I've started hundreds of writing projects and games and books without finishing them. I have conversations with people and have to mentally remind myself to concentrate on what they're saying, only to miss what they're saying because I'm reminding myself to focus. Novice googling tells me these are textbook signs of ADHD. 

To give a little bit more background, I'm currently finishing up just over a decade of service in the Navy's nuclear power program. One of the drawbacks of the program is that any sign of mental instability or mental health issue is met with removal from the program. Makes enough sense, right? You don't want people struggling with mental health issues running nuclear reactors. 

The problem here is that people in this program HAVE these issues, they just don't report them. They do their best to cope because the second the blow the whistle and try to get medication, the Navy processes them out of the ""pipeline"", so to speak, to put them in a different job. 

All this just to say that I haven't gotten help yet because I don't want to lose my job. But I get out in December, so it will soon not be a problem anymore.

Now I'm no medical professional, but I know that, if properly evaluated and diagnosed, people are often prescribed medication for ADHD. I've heard time and time again that their lives are dramatically changed for the better afterward. 

My question is this: is this realistic? Is it worth it to go through the process of getting a therapist to evaluate me, get prescribed some long-titled jumble of chemicals, and start taking it? I'm not knocking the legitimacy of medicine at all, but I'm skeptical about it. Miracles don't exist, and I'd rather not go through the money loss, pain, and wasted time to get something that isn't going to help that much or at all.

Any help or advice you can give me is greatly appreciated.",7.548260869565219,8.023337329923278,7.698823529411764,70.14470588235297,63.16879795396419,10.482864450127877,36.43734015345268,10.276239652853533,3.9115943734015337,1700,76,282,36,23,552,201,391,0.064,0.86,0.076,0.8292,5,0,1,0,0,0,50.0,0,3,8,5,15,12,1,2,21,0,26,9,0,1,4,48,52,19,0,6,16,0,0,0,0,2,9,5,0,0,21,15,0,0,2,7,2,6,11,9,0,2,4,5,25,3,50,45,12,34,0,3,0,0,33,13,0,7,15,190,46,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19847139818412932,0.0806885663949949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230381079649628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188940232459192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100568064331574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08665439545935856,0.0730283719690863,0.09014742087075413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735040450204674,0.0,0.08657534658856063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05325221699162987,0.0,0.0,0.08380901184915343,0.0,0.0862703404136767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531912192572955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157027473064754,0.15842149418471274,0.14078299694456586,0.0,0.0,0.09103610613839848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554070553888468,0.0,0.0,0.22138553322779986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585516697407332,0.16388027023429358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045379503791462536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058323163831476926,0.0,0.08275900428927976,0.07291273666613565,0.07307376981425777,0.0,0.09237713425380673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05511756296801793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33273108676405205,0.3328532945051785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060700043964051376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05595303766054285,0.06279985420348738,0.08786260795621173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289805764662373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580208253034043,0.0,0.08300783489063564,0.09249972509200237,0.0,0.16518902533761998,0.0,0.05289784486093835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705161798506807,0.0,0.19699410532310715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417192617498091,0.0,0.06356808862767431,0.0,0.0,0.11689001026037542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17264471555361535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06208399370260863,0.0,0.14434342776459136,0.0,0.0,0.0958726506791464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444454846344324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05606108153108201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740640748697137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921888761554852,0.0,0.0795966228441082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,captainechinoid,2020/02/04,"I’m seeing a doctor today. Need some advice! So, in order to get a proper therapist, I need a referral from my family doctor. However, I have no clue what to say to him or how to explain my problems... I’m having a hard time thinking of explanations or descriptions in general. I don’t know what I’m supposed to say! Does anyone have any advice or experience with this?",2.4307240704501005,4.639825849315071,5.449745596868887,74.56506849315069,78.17808219178082,8.554990215264189,25.497064579256357,9.23628265651192,2.659068101761252,289,11,51,8,7,105,49,73,0.065,0.935,0.0,-0.4912,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,4,2,0,1,0,13,14,5,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,10,14,1,5,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,4,2,34,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4145419073929384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14424173713527216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14831189788343174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4342061330068051,0.18561845745127356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20748379678687134,0.19995796431545174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108184620118246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900084541781601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656983695911124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145530210706976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20296015053857389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3373559841016571,0.0,0.0,0.16902381379794748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462754839687888,0.0,0.1359112063769896,0.0,0.0,0.12368275826823387,0.0,0.20105500969198234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,darthwalker04,2020/02/04,"Feeling empty again. Hi,

I have not been feeling well deep inside as of late, I feel a void somewhere inside me that I can't pinpoint. I'm the usually stronger vessel, problems or difficulties never really got me down, but here I am now unable to help myself.

I usually feel this before during teenage years but not to a very extent.

To give you all a gist of what I've been going through here are some threads:

Note that I'm a recently married man and a recently turned Christian

[https://www.reddit.com/r/Christianity/comments/eome64/as\_christians\_do\_we\_believe\_in\_destinyfate/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Christianity/comments/eome64/as_christians_do_we_believe_in_destinyfate/)

[https://www.reddit.com/r/Christianity/comments/eoxtc1/is\_it\_okay\_to\_masturbate\_if\_wife\_denies\_you\_of\_sex/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Christianity/comments/eoxtc1/is_it_okay_to_masturbate_if_wife_denies_you_of_sex/)

Now I'm actually on the verge of giving up on marriage:

[https://www.reddit.com/r/Christianity/comments/eq2ams/i\_feel\_like\_i\_want\_to\_give\_up\_on\_my\_marriage\_now/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Christianity/comments/eq2ams/i_feel_like_i_want_to_give_up_on_my_marriage_now/)

Here's what my wife had been doing, although I've been seeing improvements as of late, but I still can't seem to get a hold of myself and I couldn't feel at home with her anymore.  
[https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship\_advice/comments/bb4i8z/26m\_dont\_know\_what\_else\_to\_do\_wife\_27f\_has\_been/](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/bb4i8z/26m_dont_know_what_else_to_do_wife_27f_has_been/)  
I ended up posting on r/phr4r of possibly hooking up to get a quick fix.

Why do I think I need help now\*\*? - I just cried while taking a bath, I feel trapped.\*\*

I told my wife I want us to have a marriage counseling but she brushes it off and she keeps on telling me that I have the problem, I should have myself check.

Sorry for the long post and thank you for taking your time to check my thread.",19.41134796238245,25.796518379310346,9.528761755485897,45.528777429467105,41.93103448275862,6.631974921630094,25.200626959247646,7.686295010490155,1.3772948275862067,1752,34,183,14,22,413,136,232,0.073,0.831,0.096,0.794,0,1,0,0,0,0,172.0,1,3,0,0,11,4,0,0,13,0,17,0,0,0,2,32,43,13,0,6,8,2,6,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,7,5,0,2,8,1,2,1,6,2,1,0,7,8,32,2,29,34,3,33,1,0,1,0,19,12,0,3,18,125,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.1222636631576989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242526888237249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066114252929215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13762371452755187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096856884054916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3800982787533874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091631189715178,0.24037660626583104,0.07120443514651383,0.0,0.1002047901026114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679567012908059,0.0,0.1256747456116129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113623214124386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826621408283012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087652521773024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928999569816462,0.09663034163660417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14124414392423906,0.23998381464696855,0.0,0.0,0.23976866208236716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026312648978784,0.0,0.2474148819321653,0.13451313738329096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983884419392633,0.11405809437974955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025040204429226,0.0,0.0,0.1000556890766582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840296623212088,0.0,0.10950781483721717,0.11534896893772872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802799170884973,0.0,0.0,0.07305682764310696,0.0,0.0,0.11971868777632115,0.0,0.0,0.1362780891102254,0.0,0.0,0.15070683665314444,0.0,0.27597552594690833,0.1033762692601106,0.07389850026589452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264955568463045,0.0,0.113053532040562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068179199827633
mentalhealth,indigoldensoul,2020/02/04,Need help ASAP. Hey guys I’m kind of new to this. Soo I’ve been living with this girl for almost a year. And about maybe 3 months ago. Her Grandma Left to Dominican Republic to take care some business. And we been watching her 3 year old Toy poodle mix. Named Bella. I love her I do. But when me and my girlfriend get into an argument the dog shakes and pees. I kind of already know why... for a while I used to Attack the dog from whipping it with its leash to Almost drowning it while bathing her Because she peed on the bed. I’m not no type of animal abuser because I’ve grown around dogs and cats. Hell at one point I used to work with dogs from the shelter so I know a scared and abused dog when I see one. So anyway Bella used to be so loving and kind and even tho she still kind of is.. I feel like she only likes me because she’s scared of me. I know I sound crazy and shit but I want to know what can I do to make her like me again. And go crazy for me everytime she sees me. I get so mad though. Like When my girl will leave the room. She would run after her. I’ll Try to Calm her but all she do is shake.  I’ve dealt with seeing my mom be abused.. but I was never the type and still feel I’m not the type I don’t know where all this rage comes from. I was always loved as a child. I’m 24 years old now... so I feel like if I was gonna become an abuser it would’ve happened already. I just want the damn dog to like me again. I do love her. I just Get so mad sometimes I take it out on her. Then she’ll look at me with those Eyes like “really nigga..” I just want it to end I do care about Bella and my girl. We just argue tooo much and since I’ve already attacked Bella I’m kind of already used to it and I do feel some type of power omg I sound like a monster but I’m not. I love animals I used to take care of them and loved it. So for this to be happening I just don’t know what’s wrong.. it happens like all the time it’s not a one time thing I wish it was or actually never happened at all. But it just keeps happening I keep telling myself it’s not gonna happen again. But from me attacking my girl to her dog I don’t know what’s going on with me. I see a therapist but I just don’t feel comfortable telling her about me hitting a dog..I just want Bella to like me again. She don’t like treats..so I can’t give her any of those.  I don’t wanna be judged I just want to know how I can get Bella to like me again. The way she used too...,-0.6281188725490168,1.2451578180147074,1.4596029411764742,100.74667156862749,87.54779411764706,4.582549019607844,15.500490196078431,5.788238676338638,-0.9414614215686274,1879,35,479,13,60,623,202,544,0.109,0.723,0.168,0.9863,1,0,0,0,4,1,55.0,2,0,1,2,38,43,10,4,20,0,30,9,3,8,6,94,99,42,1,10,24,1,5,12,1,5,0,2,3,6,23,27,0,2,13,2,0,7,15,15,0,3,6,14,82,28,57,83,7,49,1,0,7,6,46,13,3,6,40,291,105,5,0.0,0.25890594173602643,0.05331006768151434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0484253523517364,0.0,0.1094061950336037,0.0,0.2411380388132473,0.0,0.045455741763403015,0.0,0.0,0.037149623976669384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04863143216768738,0.0,0.18644527591322346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09990407653050397,0.060333488325053614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16709385693836387,0.0,0.0,0.04705808516601548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048385119197518055,0.0,0.0,0.03608196906867807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381104331044127,0.07805400146734894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416568533284495,0.052405157910881926,0.06209389051248335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409134341362119,0.2898497049917765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036616697398588166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711361067286688,0.0,0.2844387196300045,0.24018155610488276,0.0,0.0,0.057844270947754614,0.0593546173418071,0.0,0.0,0.3202679041849201,0.0,0.0482384476723627,0.0,0.045874639206046286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958290763695996,0.0,0.03646531180464885,0.0,0.05488221844403556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06398087737038817,0.0436043826060271,0.0,0.04015863384579218,0.040506744738323934,0.08426657470733308,0.05276107217113183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114647986472455,0.0,0.11105416430836404,0.04154785047636162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05164210528580288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03499676514666164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938640851487696,0.0,0.17412910438835402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05607592975300385,0.045189710626346684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05402952246335358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725365196554435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322272973627943,0.0,0.0954963865772114,0.0,0.0,0.06342853189249004,0.03629311014777402,0.0,0.05367275944233623,0.0,0.0637092710240052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037089535677093464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830917303281755,0.0,0.0,0.16110813094385726,0.043361993226340614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049294216196867635,0.0,0.06282070583753928,0.0,0.0,0.03977059546039991,0.0,0.0,0.07761381250801333,0.059728285003896174,0.0,0.10553794187925404
mentalhealth,Enacriel,2020/02/04,"This is clearly something but I dont know what it is? My kid is 9. He can be the sweetest, or the not so sweetest kid ever, but he's like living with a little jekyl/hyde. The best way to describe it, would be a light switch analogy:

He listens well, very sweet, nice kid for a few days, sometimes as long as a few weeks... and like someone hit a switch, he's suddenly rude, obnoxious, cant control himself, very little emotional regulation, throwing things in tantrum, scratching/hitting/kicking, fights everything no matter what, for a few days or weeks, and then like someone hit a switch, back to being the sweet kid.

He just had about 2 or 3 weeks of really good behaviour, but the switch has been flipped and for the last 3 days he's been extremely difficult.

I desperately want to get him in to see mental health, but I get the ""the doctor needs to send a referal"" and then, ""the referral has been sent, now wait for nine to nine thousand months for an appointment "".

I KNOW there is something, and if I could figure it out, I could make it better. But I cant figure it out. Does anyone recognize these symptoms? Suggestions?",5.420460829493088,6.134896276497699,5.680806451612908,81.94120967741938,67.80184331797236,8.964976958525344,31.62903225806452,9.04235418022936,2.5692728110599083,880,35,171,15,14,280,124,217,0.106,0.703,0.191,0.9620000000000001,0,0,2,0,1,0,43.0,0,0,0,3,8,14,3,0,18,0,20,3,0,2,2,35,33,19,0,6,11,0,0,3,0,1,3,1,0,4,10,8,0,2,5,0,0,3,5,4,1,3,5,5,10,10,20,20,4,25,0,0,1,0,17,6,0,4,18,110,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756642688805073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729414351787364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643383994916032,0.12340776109487026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650086551809114,0.22281539605175865,0.0,0.0,0.2699664539306915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428204396779021,0.1221084074605154,0.0,0.16353450130065386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695859367553752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621779775976,0.0,0.0,0.12540545987597398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14580302087727195,0.0,0.0,0.11703571031195785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14831965212601111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15337006184038127,0.11374001050389355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045099093657339,0.2797023445655914,0.12321235356412714,0.123484477120164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931409924593137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061890858433673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137586024928027,0.0,0.0,0.10346376376637992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938997851130466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119168324727637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364558579832732,0.2148424039342505,0.13800412214487018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14503075360603776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270114888111028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23026270946262906,0.0823016201795532,0.11075674070063787,0.33578074986989875,0.0,0.12545912179534074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991219760340271,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,273rd-Kelvin,2020/02/04,Anyone finds sadness addicting? Anyone feel like life is repetetive and there is nothing to do?I feel like everyday is just a repeat of the same old thing but for some reason I also like this feeling of loneliness and sadness not sure how to explain but it feels nice at the same time its choking?It feels like I constantly have a mask up and I cant really show anyone whatbI really think or feel and thats probably because no-one gives a shit maybe I've become addicted to it as a way to cope and sometimes i wonder what its like after death I mean after all whats there to look forward to in life if you are already bored of everything,6.703948256467937,6.3655932755905535,7.002249718785155,77.17433070866144,65.06299212598425,10.091788526434195,32.316085489313835,9.606745405546679,2.8962022497187854,514,18,96,9,7,167,85,127,0.177,0.691,0.132,-0.8589,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,5,11,1,0,6,0,6,5,1,2,2,29,18,12,1,1,6,0,6,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,12,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,0,7,6,7,16,18,4,12,0,2,1,0,3,4,1,4,13,62,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30006579639112785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15187396011438706,0.11005964134714137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886943666806741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389566854974292,0.15199735130196534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872505517723847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368957564584472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4175277233619696,0.2949606050698929,0.0,0.0,0.1257878751265173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202361438311902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944189437403605,0.3361861055841759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155713658339369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382640398997991,0.14991530408829698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13205607341261622,0.0,0.1444155705205632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483843464434241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17633376600970072,0.14150267954952225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412713408568538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611585430457515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971108707096665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143274765171187,0.08818532702537063,0.0,0.0,0.08025095778364508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924129037704997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924976883013144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notwhoyourthink,2020/02/04,Arguments Not sure if this belongs here or where. But I keep having arguments with myself all normal about conversations I know I’m going to have or news I’m going to have to give people. 99.9% of the time it’s all okay and I get wound out over nothing. But it doesn’t stop me feeling like shit and worthless then it takes a day to get over it. When it happens I try and limit human contact as I know it’s just in my head and there no no point in passing my episode onto anyone else,0.08631221719457116,2.3912410098039203,2.0464705882352945,94.36527149321267,89.88235294117645,4.314932126696832,18.630467571644047,5.8734145424116955,-0.22410346907993967,381,11,82,3,13,126,71,102,0.192,0.752,0.055,-0.9269,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,1,6,5,1,0,2,1,4,3,2,0,3,24,17,12,0,2,7,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,6,0,3,3,0,0,3,4,2,0,0,0,1,9,3,14,17,2,16,0,1,0,0,4,8,1,3,6,56,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16454881190279153,0.2411242803984376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151768938916103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19658873996930287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899035579672901,0.16812041634350486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459013271514133,0.2257508084376709,0.2674879065543767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20810230594282356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24151735953565945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20917288482350435,0.0,0.0,0.25866337696520936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497077318441302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23057428135703564,0.2258063110247221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314879025666074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224637322440447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24156375021638826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967471398168429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22179655439992252,0.0,0.1769395225254178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722331934484402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597742092089572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wendtoffthedeepend,2020/02/04,"How do you deal with toxic coworkers? I'm currently at a job with what I find to be extremely toxic people. I can deal with general laziness, because that seems to be a problem just about everywhere. What I'm struggling to deal with is the fact that people here tend to relentlessly talk down about everyone else. There seems to be more concern with making others look bad than making themselves look good. 

I'm also working opposite shifts of a guy that refuses to do every part of his job, what's worse is that the management here is so lazy that they refuse to do anything about it. I catch him lying on paperwork daily, yet when I point it out to my superiors I get told he didn't  do it. They seem almost willfully ignorant. 

It's becoming hard to deal with the stress here, I can only find so many stress and anger management techniques. Yet every adjustment I make to myself seems to be met in kind with pushing my limits even further. I've stood my ground and spoke to my superiors about how badly this affects my daily life, but I tend to get the same placating language that everyone else gets, without any real changes ever being made. 

I know I need to leave this job, but I need some ways to deal with this until I can find something different.",6.675667060212515,6.784440132231411,6.94977567886659,76.02388429752071,65.03305785123968,10.385360094451004,32.574970484061396,10.125756701596842,3.1910391971664698,1000,37,184,21,14,324,136,242,0.111,0.8590000000000001,0.03,-0.9175,5,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,2,2,20,12,1,3,7,0,17,1,0,7,2,45,42,11,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,17,11,0,4,9,0,0,2,2,8,0,0,6,4,23,4,37,30,4,17,0,0,2,0,18,8,0,6,6,124,40,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402280957427893,0.0,0.0,0.07508822098661466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385217984852899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726802032897874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15679769016246065,0.057237843252761926,0.1037002352928212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932902006706358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4840108396782574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981008436422491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15687533290732694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062017111659304826,0.08493388201818178,0.15822206650410825,0.17944240440941706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25745643859983225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14716961624527067,0.0,0.0,0.07875511526884707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297133640071736,0.0,0.0,0.08411195143571279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27953047401715003,0.0,0.0,0.09777774490049447,0.05160252741164985,0.0,0.0,0.0994218082552502,0.0,0.0,0.06632118927915973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576971931080882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884622027512715,0.18802798507829274,0.09519532938757602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13924469069911705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141178124985906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167970835394824,0.0,0.13019067515737573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876162505807915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898453408261436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687366887432988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419158542081274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228536589976739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21511402351588965,0.0981599942979985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546966988148428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972120220470853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07452990080916634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051193973083044,0.0,0.06835706373812446,0.0,0.09568756624048012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yogoslxt,2020/02/04,"sorta just need to vent I have suffered with mental illness for most of my life unfortunately but lately my anxiety is through the roof. I can't sleep. Hate being alone. I get very panicy and worked up over small things. I feel like everyone hates me. I am so miserable and don't want to leave the house. Getting into my car is such a big effort. I just want to sleep all day. I've seen a lot of psychologists and my latest one was actually helping but she got a new job and relocated. I'm hesitant to see a new psych because I just don't think talking about it helps. They don't say much and I'm not ready to actively make a change in my life. I dont know what to do and I sound stupid for not wanting help. 

TL;DR I am getting bad again and want help but also dont want help crikey",0.7087878787878772,2.8873010000000012,2.788636363636368,91.3962878787879,84.45454545454545,6.090909090909091,20.075757575757574,7.3871296695380915,0.5103939393939392,615,18,138,10,18,207,105,165,0.278,0.642,0.08,-0.9849,1,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,8,7,3,1,7,0,14,5,2,1,1,31,34,12,0,6,8,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,9,0,0,3,0,0,1,8,6,0,1,3,5,18,1,17,30,4,13,0,2,2,0,9,6,0,3,7,83,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.123295229560437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308560964628696,0.0,0.10103865321218347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665415539896158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549342648309902,0.0770191984713562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336570540704526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148255851127713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29615256362771725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207287816415005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388420909923043,0.09026143135403067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980313240052224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105024076385936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494805477490717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4234344756862388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578603572420726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537866461323674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943632174941672,0.0,0.1425235128793678,0.13378190978610535,0.0,0.0,0.1784834839912143,0.06172615305865942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741464123097183,0.0,0.0,0.08433677137322626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732680241957126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287866615422448,0.0936837751003171,0.0,0.2440510315634135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561515224381147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047521411731232,0.0,0.0,0.10068120728610536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528739972479653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155193055582666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393850433402622,0.08095725705316266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042484784141222,0.37260999380917625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919812131235694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_TinFoilHats_,2020/02/04,"Venting, need some help. I can't keep doing this. 
I am sitting by myself in a dark quiet livingroom.. it happened again, I did it again. 
I called in sick from work with some wild story.. because I couldn't find the energy or motivation to even get dressed. I am throwing my life away like this and I don't know why. As I have no friends or anyone I can open up to I will use the anonymity of the internet to vent.

It's happening more frequently again, and I've used every wild excuse and lie I can think of. I can't keep going on like this it needs to stop! But I don't know how. It's like some days.. from the second I open my eyes I feel it in my chest, and this voice in my head, my mind starts rolling through every previous excuse I used to get out of work trying to come up with anything. I then proceed to feel like a piece of shit the entire day and be completely unproductive. Usually I sit on the couch for hours just staring at my phone with all lights out eventhough I have a ton of work. 

It's coming to a point where I'm afraid I will be called into the office and be questioned about it all. My work is great, I get to stay with my lovely boyfriend (who doesn't know about me calling off work frequently btw) and have the opportunity to pass my final nursing exams in 2 months. So I should be feeling great.. But some days I feel to paralyzed, anxious and unmotivated to do anything at all. 

How can I stop this self destructive behaviour before it's too late?",2.5610264900662263,4.159548652317884,3.8125907284768235,89.24399867549671,75.72185430463577,6.951205298013246,24.00052980132451,7.699297019823105,1.0090806357615891,1151,36,250,16,25,376,157,302,0.085,0.802,0.113,0.8147,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,7,12,12,2,1,12,0,25,7,4,6,3,56,51,17,0,4,5,0,4,4,1,3,2,2,1,1,15,19,0,4,11,0,0,5,7,3,0,1,1,9,35,9,45,42,10,46,0,0,2,1,12,20,1,7,22,167,50,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583142783545758,0.0,0.07169241946308083,0.0,0.16874940165497898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963317337404555,0.0,0.0,0.06250226005403804,0.0,0.08724676770379237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140884224469783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664364331279192,0.10750234303161392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19837303541275875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772109884736342,0.0,0.1727744475496093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20737205941978865,0.0732485350056901,0.0,0.11231826329280237,0.09371194745460476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921559436803577,0.0,0.1607054547110496,0.0,0.058271022975622026,0.0,0.0,0.2260827151374211,0.0,0.0,0.18133656070031076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522691502430992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872471342331413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009728891538344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18226944364604025,0.0,0.0,0.1690459181080133,0.0,0.11566001519886275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724210414622689,0.20036687720361065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253869564147862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352760198742963,0.0,0.0818396772920132,0.0,0.0,0.15205163882201914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969254230579588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485876255775035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069627317338548,0.0,0.10524712702161047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257233424486292,0.10928495304059414,0.0,0.17144187566961366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06569805495288579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06961216853244424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656629273188373,0.11292397854200953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251874478683154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732208213562053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zanza004,2020/02/04,"Mobile Crisis Unit workers, if you have a suicidal person in the lobby, and a suicidal person on the phone line, what would be the best course of action assuming no one is available to attend to the person that just walked in? Not quite sure how that situation would be be handled.",11.726415094339625,7.933385886792452,10.997830188679247,63.412971698113225,58.05660377358491,13.618867924528306,39.70754716981132,11.20814326018867,4.384667924528302,224,7,38,4,2,73,40,53,0.262,0.659,0.079,-0.9213,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,3,2,2,0,0,6,0,7,0,0,1,1,9,7,3,2,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,6,2,1,6,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,2,0,31,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24392566243257746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575036292632616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6088585068498628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472226963588393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612661110023368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5084912237673678,0.0,0.21906676078719864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302295927515185,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrTwinkieWinky,2020/02/04,"First Anxiety Attack Im not sure this is what this is but im usually a kind of cold/monotone person and try to act fine or cool, never have really broken down until now, woke up today and i knew i had to school and work and idk I just got overwhelmed. Shaking, panicky, thinking not being awake would help me, etc. I think I might have been avoiding depression because thats why i act so emotionless all the time. Thanks guys this is my first big issue with mental health I thank you for helping me",3.377400000000001,4.99882654,4.271000000000001,86.70550000000001,73.6,7.0,24.5,7.645422480735847,1.1883,394,12,78,5,8,127,78,100,0.17300000000000001,0.623,0.204,0.6834,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,3,3,11,1,3,2,1,10,1,0,0,3,19,17,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,5,5,0,1,3,0,0,3,3,5,0,2,5,1,11,6,8,9,2,14,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,2,8,52,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093825410368282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947211763115612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043386012601044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742134627943512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19089057226197206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911801582962746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13689367050760756,0.0,0.0,0.16947702160083386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18193691391718345,0.0,0.0,0.2294521978690224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3697680773831621,0.17864837573848374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17823860155304885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249076504373811,0.1815755458789744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201047709887986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945181964320772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965058636769803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17322480751612274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16131790385445044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151654473001523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21934704931844176,0.0,0.0,0.09980578055665154,0.0,0.16224130556350322,0.0,0.0,0.1162075785592114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18851046281546585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15444683781118593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12460777715169324,0.0,0.0,0.1215883813271246,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sweetbabycoconut,2020/02/04,"I had my first panic attack around April. It’s becoming more frequent and draining Each time my crying gets louder, breathing gets faster, chest gets heavier—it feels like it’s caving in on itself. I was a quiet crier before this. I don’t know what shifted. I don’t know what triggers it.

Today specifically scared the shit out of me. Suicidal ideation never coincided as intensely. I felt a deep urge to make whatever rash decision.

I’m not sure if this is relevant but I’ve been having trouble keeping it together in public as well. I’ve been crying at work, on the sidewalk. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.

It’s like I’m alone in my own little world.",2.161549450549451,4.667966407692308,3.734505494505495,84.82692307692308,81.07692307692307,6.483516483516485,23.9010989010989,7.7094869923839395,1.4477252747252751,523,19,98,9,14,173,88,130,0.214,0.71,0.076,-0.9475,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,2,10,2,2,4,0,9,4,4,2,2,19,21,5,1,1,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,11,5,0,1,6,0,0,0,5,6,1,1,5,3,11,4,13,16,3,18,0,0,0,0,1,11,1,1,9,58,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18724281050273947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609404789936804,0.0,0.2056735097314328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19966717157150726,0.1538380654307326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.397176305300098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141231613827608,0.12915564917164096,0.17358572624746085,0.0,0.0,0.15377897323587922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28336426560636313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069350954547715,0.0,0.0,0.29807060702798305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664868038464185,0.18119800485917453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120678015984763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13943556967222115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21211685859570772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18100125985473187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855772407307573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19775374841907584,0.0,0.17039142889715958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541948013772832,0.0,0.17136676847752969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625509617805077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161649570981634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976643164620836,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,realsmoothmilk,2020/02/04,"I think Part of my brain doesn’t work. Nothing ever feels necessary. I always go through life and everything has always felt logical. The facial movement everyone makes is just... movement. It’s like there’s no real meaning to any of it other than for a logic based human interaction system for communication. I’m starting to lose motivation to make emotion, and it’s starting to make me depressed I think. The only interests I have are things like sx drugs and other stuff tht you kind of keep private because of how morbid it is. I’m just always feeling bored as fuck and I really want to add some spice to my life",2.826597131681879,5.555227813559327,4.350000000000001,80.04226205997394,80.18644067796609,6.68161668839635,26.02607561929596,7.882392219407189,1.9613056062581489,494,20,85,9,13,164,81,118,0.114,0.7829999999999999,0.10300000000000001,-0.5118,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,3,5,8,1,0,3,0,6,6,2,5,1,25,23,6,0,1,2,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,8,5,0,1,9,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,1,4,9,4,15,22,2,7,0,2,0,1,3,0,1,1,5,53,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3984359622282121,0.0,0.0,0.10854328189240693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729947152682944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17818248510696988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747566970928368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185102057888054,0.0,0.0,0.1795447437514959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14438038481983512,0.0,0.15251842248351485,0.14345115250595813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16141169754126464,0.0,0.15325487815095365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14756096321374834,0.0,0.0,0.09071255560925047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187263410087814,0.0,0.16621386071258346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22548077639461675,0.15595909049158385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17856771293172338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196316028118278,0.0,0.0,0.17386690056503434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315434487940704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139396213300807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17284686713565015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181676158825287,0.10225308732659273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259518220105511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18272032833396126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604073107162554,0.20454895620509325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414472288161076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162012018425304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Souless_F0X,2020/02/04,"I'm not going anywhere but down, I need to talk I don't know what to do, I'm 17 I'm still in school. I failed 11 out of my 14 subjects last year, the only reason I passed was because my parents noticed I had nothing done and forced me through the compulsory classes, but they ended up doing most of the work there.

But at this point school is the least of my worries, I don't know how I'm going to keep on going. I've lost any pleasure in anything I used to find fun and now I spend all my time staring at walls wondering why I suck so much. Ever since my recent suicide attempt things like the word happy, trains, or even just smiling will trigger my depression, as if I wasn't sad enough already without it. I used to ghost my friends all the time, I just couldn't handle socializing for too long, and if school wasn't keeping us together I would never see them again. It's not like I don't like them it's just what happens whenever I get into a relationship. My most recent ghosting was 4-5 months ago and I still haven't seen them since, it's like I sent myself to solitary confinement.

Life seems meaningless because even if I manage to get past all this, proceed to complete school and have a somewhat successful life, it will still be empty. I can't get hobbies and I can't have fun, I won't give myself any me time because I never do anything with it, I'll be empty like always.

But the reason I've come here isn't to vent out, I just need someone to talk to just to pass the time and get me through the day. Just be aware that I will eventually ghost you so please don't take it personally.",4.019129244249726,4.589111066265062,4.938828039430452,86.5321851040526,70.86746987951805,7.482146768893758,28.343921139101862,7.348242739294969,1.4170253012048195,1262,44,269,12,22,412,168,332,0.114,0.723,0.163,0.9623,1,0,0,0,0,1,29.0,1,1,4,5,20,16,1,0,11,0,29,2,0,6,6,57,59,19,4,7,17,1,0,5,1,5,2,0,0,1,13,12,0,3,7,0,1,7,17,5,0,0,9,3,43,11,31,41,9,42,0,4,3,0,15,12,1,9,28,175,56,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210788484246323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221574733315077,0.0,0.07707274452086485,0.0,0.0,0.12597851742044394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244758547239665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16939293185680088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978960709780937,0.09711721918458917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05973648889006895,0.0,0.07977914777132666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09478916265467664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08203966728630765,0.09570802995540767,0.0,0.12235798057436782,0.08378605523566904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465902681290535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156307503749612,0.0,0.19357428472968055,0.0888558670599638,0.1579254800642671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190938920527842,0.0986027293321685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16466154141421846,0.0,0.0,0.10181030489309492,0.07550303500559923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308498021331321,0.2262633699643209,0.0,0.0,0.0819716189346817,0.0,0.0,0.10111286676591852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393366184797626,0.0,0.06809120270908504,0.1373628882722253,0.14287867565491105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887771296399677,0.10545598866418257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07044669696125933,0.0,0.0,0.10285086855138413,0.0,0.08842256276943597,0.0,0.08087796716636264,0.0,0.10167618252878642,0.0875620687905438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904711265697431,0.18291516965098392,0.09944629503530301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3749722239082873,0.0738114012418103,0.08432377034320797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15324334779111895,0.0,0.0,0.0944211455759254,0.07848221062885748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22191514753369865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131845750095228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964366949548631,0.1488994916764577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061536991758851085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160452421963112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141838509751026,0.15999927080073528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358109193493074,0.0,0.0,0.08928872908636717,0.10044958759738498,0.06743326199177599,0.09406680015233207,0.0,0.06579927321235056,0.0,0.0,0.05964848822293699
mentalhealth,absloutemattness,2020/02/04,"I feel like I’m losing touch with reality It started with a bad acid trip just over a year ago, I had a panic attack and thought I triggered a mental illness, the idea that i had essentially ruined my life has left me in despair. I deal with depersonalizations almost everyday in short episodes. I feel uneasy around most people including my parents. Intrusive thoughts don’t help (although they’ve subsided). Life has been fucking tough. I’m starting to see a therapist now. But I need advice from someone who’s been through it all, how do I cope with all of this",3.81644859813084,6.272278728971963,4.6839345794392555,80.53898598130844,74.7943925233645,7.270654205607477,30.326168224299067,8.238735603445708,2.4308624299065413,452,21,81,8,10,146,80,107,0.231,0.721,0.048,-0.9571,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,4,9,2,1,6,0,8,4,0,2,2,20,19,4,0,1,2,1,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,8,0,0,6,5,11,1,12,13,3,13,0,3,1,1,4,6,1,2,7,51,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18578910779129731,0.16853539166905626,0.0,0.1903839108601592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16925261396708133,0.0,0.21629598323238394,0.0,0.0,0.15874742311005705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960117485828977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19226702383302796,0.13582618473363622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17576859461371613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743757428699615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21462932091164774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065726565789196,0.0,0.26858349468674914,0.09288605046996946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21270256890319766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916024765788471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14097615728483426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22307211341914196,0.21111262880621207,0.0,0.0,0.13180955773505368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150595392632665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16109329978193912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691445849921289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207511550529941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30187790757955235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243502977098722
mentalhealth,zakknn,2020/02/04,"I failed the same subject TWICE! Fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck
Seriously considering running away from home right now. Any suggestion? Lol",4.445689655172412,7.895419000000004,3.106465517241382,85.70383620689658,83.13793103448276,7.037931034482759,24.49137931034483,8.07648339933343,1.8689241379310344,137,5,24,3,4,39,18,29,0.75,0.20600000000000002,0.044000000000000004,-0.9925,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,14,12,0,1,1,0,12,0,0,0,1,12,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,14,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,12,1,4,0,1,0,12,1,2,12,0,1,7,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060545474668626524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836494088615738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9877145858764876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930733116178598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760336724212194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,evoke98,2020/02/04,"what does it mean when the room feels like its getting bigger? I’ve been experiencing this since i was about 5 years old all the way till i was like around 10. I’m 16 now and haven’t really experienced it much anymore. It almost always happened while i was laying down in bed with the room pitch black. A lot of times it happened after not being able to fall asleep after over an hour. Sometimes it happened when i just woke up randomly in the middle of the night and couldn’t go back to sleep. It started with a weird feeling in my body like something was off or not right. Then it felt like the room and everything in it was getting bigger (sometimes smaller). A lot of times it felt like things were getting thicker and distance also changed too. It felt like my arm was farther away from me then it actually was. Its hard to explain but it was very unpleasant. When i turned the lights on however, everything would turn back to normal. But when i turned them back off, the distortion would continue. Another thing that sometimes accompanied this physical distortion was audio distortion. Whenever somebody would talk or even whisper, it felt like they were yelling at me or talking to me in a very very angry or mad tone even though i knew they weren’t. Things also sounded way louder. All these things often made me cry and I just begged for it to stop. Sometimes however wasn’t as extreme. It would just be a slight distortion of my surroundings with no audio changing. Thats mostly what happens now, if it happens at all which is kind of rare now.",4.467747747747747,6.4320355945945975,4.607837837837838,83.9936936936937,71.43243243243242,7.636036036036036,28.54954954954956,8.344100000000001,2.0458833333333333,1240,48,231,20,24,386,159,296,0.08900000000000001,0.861,0.05,-0.9508,3,0,1,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,3,0,22,10,1,0,14,0,23,4,4,1,3,47,48,24,0,7,12,0,7,7,0,4,0,5,4,0,30,9,0,1,9,0,0,2,7,2,0,0,21,16,18,8,36,20,7,53,0,0,1,0,6,24,0,11,32,166,48,0,0.08176210163646384,0.0,0.07978801687223416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08187293427780681,0.0,0.0,0.13077024627769288,0.06803261838693833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573469253480168,0.0,0.0,0.08108603469127736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278560502863217,0.0,0.0,0.0768181859312599,0.1886100278553024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081926297171057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17298692452718106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981182939513778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155056612714937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800619402827732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14696500980021188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268275052734597,0.05841086174593015,0.31401775832299017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815197049626673,0.0,0.04646728656837402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615097822681884,0.0,0.07324278335283947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051920039074623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514264696319293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796138302740899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390224299417961,0.0,0.07736527749333445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890628980635462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060104552370790036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672819366915873,0.08010949986582835,0.0,0.0,0.08579557180157069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05237889594658523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982438805700665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763445537992809,0.0,0.08182114924843828,0.0,0.0,0.06294446037462248,0.32345923667995263,0.0,0.057871636365516725,0.0,0.0,0.06835677803264485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13143456040405024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21727642906899336,0.0,0.08033084972896137,0.0,0.09535227795525228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668010640058547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023868900102133,0.0,0.12979790113290993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323258045329826,0.0,0.0,0.052652112778081725
mentalhealth,Mlb91,2020/02/04,"Why am I like this? What do I do now? I fell for a cam girl and it got too much. I’m bipolar and I have the spending problem and I’ll spent it on her. Recently she decided to part ways with me and now I can’t stop obsessing over her, I want to clear my head, but for some reason I can’t. She’s all I think about and I can’t stop I want to, but can’t. I’m on meds and going to therapy, but I can’t seem to shake it. Please does anyone have any advice or know how to help",-2.317335907335906,-0.6216608738738714,0.8967374517374544,102.7550675675676,94.67567567567568,4.6128700128700135,14.234877734877735,6.1826913282559595,-0.9800635778635772,357,7,100,4,14,126,66,111,0.098,0.774,0.128,0.4606,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,2,0,10,2,1,2,2,25,20,11,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,7,0,2,5,0,2,3,5,3,0,0,2,0,17,1,13,18,4,12,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,3,6,65,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21346217359787928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14855026323427215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274200040101113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19116291347536404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12414747167646101,0.0,0.17471062463331316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22418785161961427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641924883939644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005179852494773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672131679815708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.242643431758534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058239600669086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365549222813418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239787290540951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090226059902324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22459810267517907,0.21568833446825186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19886435461983087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3652600266303375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24981118514948664,0.0,0.0,0.1399708980546673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25768934055345183,0.17339167449395876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19711286436090375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bella0280,2020/02/04,"Feeling a lot of feelings I’ve been diagnosed with severe depression, among other mental health illnesses. But today, I think I’m close to a mental breakdown, not only had I organised a nice dinner with my sister (twin) who then told me she doesn’t want to go out with me cause she has a phone call with a friend whom she saw yesterday; I thought we were super close, we’re twins after all. But she obviously thinks differently and for the past year I’ve seen just how opposite we are to each other and it’s really starting to affect me. I’ve been seeing my psychiatrist, I will again see them tomorrow, and they’ve told me to implement self care, I don’t know what that is or how to do it. They also suggested making sure I was getting as much social interactions with friends as possible and this I’m struggling with as well, all my friends aren’t at uni, and work full time so I don’t see them. And I want all of these things, the self care, the friends, the social stuff but I’m at breaking point with everybody around me. I don’t want people to feel like they have to be there for me cause I’m mentally unwell, I want people to be there for me because they want to be. It’s hard. I’m sorry if this doesn’t make sense I’m just all over the place and I’m not sure what to do about any of it. I can’t confide in my mum because, telling her there isn’t much she can do cause she doesn’t understand fully what I’m going through, and telling her about my problems with my twin won’t really matter. I just don’t know what to do anymore...",3.414594520921355,4.4241233448275885,4.5043968924628635,87.47149788741993,72.6050156739812,7.930271228022352,25.15483167507156,8.321376580360154,1.3539913043478258,1213,36,264,19,23,397,156,319,0.049,0.8320000000000001,0.11900000000000001,0.9176,2,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,2,0,5,2,15,15,0,1,10,0,29,4,0,8,7,65,66,21,0,7,10,2,4,1,4,2,3,0,0,2,18,23,1,0,9,0,0,2,13,3,1,0,10,9,40,12,40,51,9,25,0,1,5,0,35,12,0,3,11,174,58,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706859231935005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553621264146509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557505209777574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579144385423962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174948600173208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840650881147514,0.0,0.19651519750280452,0.29700153657874906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300499640342733,0.09781547363107902,0.0,0.10068814822762337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14618562035976404,0.06884812132814515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978268358108728,0.0,0.05035035236851077,0.0,0.1095407699124388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633031398545822,0.0,0.0,0.10243884801269867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592697750677732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04708245383605328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193196297633151,0.0,0.0,0.12865801441046235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913606955862642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14168890477930102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329519042574033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199790558926912,0.13362431464814342,0.0,0.10068814822762337,0.0,0.09110261776508924,0.10864486347829676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221491537477557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347664373967415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303878368882649,0.0,0.20107386806931252,0.10887284225695948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964780789938199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10788047815314376,0.06821254340129655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10074885891850774,0.11032279550458746,0.0,0.0,0.18165879456650968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16846661762030507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402522366197785,0.12350247436533872,0.0,0.07650854232592125,0.05619524353307149,0.0,0.09134931490355362,0.18417500546055748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032657099077552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842132866388231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664993293323471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015990801434029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06206035898761806
mentalhealth,PTKtm,2020/02/04,How do I get help How do I find help for my mind in a way that doesn’t make me miss time for work or spend a fortune? I need help but i can’t spare much in my funds for time missed on work or treatment that’s going to break the bank and it’s stressing me out. I don’t know what to si,-0.5943627450980387,0.5251326029411771,1.3241176470588236,105.75519607843138,83.26470588235293,4.533333333333334,15.745098039215687,3.1291,-1.4855078431372548,219,3,64,0,6,72,45,68,0.11699999999999999,0.795,0.08800000000000001,-0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,3,0,5,0,0,3,0,12,12,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,3,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,9,0,9,12,1,9,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,2,2,37,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464433907148933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408742365696571,0.0,0.1532409567039908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5421961189149949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14818547821852968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799848333333313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27225656876593296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982142661593179,0.1999324656720355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30886834468322577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31445507962396624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140253500547055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925979864839579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Joshhalas,2020/02/04,Close Friend A close friend of mine has been cutting themselves frequently. I have asked them to seek personal help but they will not. What should I do?,1.8921428571428576,4.535103928571432,0.9225714285714304,98.42242857142858,99.0,5.097142857142859,19.88571428571429,6.742157984588678,0.4934628571428581,122,4,24,2,5,34,25,28,0.044000000000000004,0.742,0.214,0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,5,7,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,5,2,2,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,1,17,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4420135884644715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7305837706210687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169146218507519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4128395138247514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ember_farah,2020/02/04,"Need a favour stranger! Hi, currently suffering from severe depression. I just need someone to listen to me tell my problems. Person who will not judge me. Anyone up for help? Can someone bring out some of their time for me?",2.3200813008130083,5.253097146341467,2.616463414634147,88.47477642276422,89.73170731707317,5.660162601626017,23.90650406504065,7.1686216300943375,1.4253382113821136,177,7,31,3,6,54,35,41,0.248,0.643,0.109,-0.7993,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,6,1,8,5,1,5,0,2,0,0,7,2,0,1,2,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21267718596911608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26197433842892043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20387341879194384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4510646301079624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655825805837818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910420154850849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3436165539303064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.515431056417569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26585104879671445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735934444086796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yoveledri,2020/02/04,"I sound like someone i hate I worked with someone i didn't like (hated)  for three years and our voices are similar. So sometimes when i talk I  obsessively think about him and i get depressed and angry, and it's very annoying. Is there a way to change your voice or think about it less?",4.287105263157893,5.332833807017547,4.665745614035089,86.99230263157897,70.57894736842105,7.805263157894737,26.530701754385966,8.07648339933343,1.4225122807017545,225,7,47,3,4,71,43,57,0.24600000000000002,0.67,0.084,-0.8655,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,1,0,1,5,7,3,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,8,7,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,1,3,10,2,5,7,1,3,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,31,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697336106222353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21961274404071607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133215824663406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5034772716814392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24913938512450945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43208517804647467,0.0,0.25218041200878955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20494218644115045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3267600562183787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103840959242842,0.0,0.2023901900069132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18562749940721995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16419789559631812
mentalhealth,Malabami101,2020/02/04,"Is it normal to miss your depression and anxiety? I know this sounds crazy because mental illness really sucks and nobody wants to feel the pain it can bring, so why do I “miss” my depression when it’s gone away for a bit? As stupid as it might sound, I kind of feel lost without it lingering if that makes sense. But of course when I’m going through rough patches where it’s kicking my a$$, I want to get rid of it. (Btw i AM diagnosed by a trained professional)",3.597050691244238,4.922582591397852,4.436589861751155,86.91774193548392,72.54838709677419,8.325038402457759,27.264208909370197,8.841846274778883,1.9084144393241167,363,13,77,7,7,117,69,93,0.29,0.6970000000000001,0.013000000000000001,-0.9782,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,4,9,2,0,4,0,5,3,0,1,0,13,20,9,0,4,3,0,3,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,9,2,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,8,0,0,2,5,8,1,13,17,1,7,0,5,0,0,1,2,1,2,2,47,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734610342982082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21303651610174168,0.0,0.0,0.1382230259269738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475492823683973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39059416788948736,0.2301436972779017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293004566629231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846608540729303,0.0,0.128865694017897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361223798873646,0.12461436488478587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475214210770817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15135555767246933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22850790791576986,0.24054301171977194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221641731209404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412750729470104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452601018162724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674828191264007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20460413508799336,0.0,0.0,0.2185762684465155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anton09876543,2020/02/04,"I'm falling apart About 2 years back I was going to kill myself but my dad pulling in the driveway prevented me from doing it. I was ready that day, I truly did not want to live anymore. I continued pushing on but there hasn't been a day that has passed where I haven't thought about killing myself. I feel so depressed and out of touch with everyone. I'm 18 now and I go to school with a smile trying to make everyone I see laugh. I'm so scared one day I'm gonna be overwhelmed with that feeling I got 2 years ago and kill myself. I don't wanna tell my parents because there struggling with there own problems. I never told anyone how I'm really feeling. I don't wanna seem weak to my family because they have been through more than me. I don't know what to do.",1.3208125000000024,3.4001564562500017,2.765000000000004,93.05,81.3125,5.5,23.125,6.6274283507984215,0.5680624999999995,603,21,130,6,16,196,96,160,0.171,0.6609999999999999,0.16899999999999998,-0.519,1,0,0,0,0,4,11.0,0,0,1,0,12,10,3,3,3,0,15,1,0,2,1,25,34,8,3,4,3,2,4,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,5,8,0,1,6,0,0,6,7,9,0,1,8,5,22,1,21,24,2,21,0,2,1,0,5,5,0,1,10,85,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350096255713094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15104611844266924,0.1064955385253438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711351905571216,0.0,0.1856880237368356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946733196257651,0.0,0.13118049368426346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29106884148506823,0.0,0.0,0.14358005929465206,0.0,0.2310306930817762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17311743748325373,0.0,0.1218126121667627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5055103697842801,0.0,0.08370311310107569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448853631631585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166509594658962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746738172165175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032061404014357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16911722034307078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457357827608574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975707956513902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15248436344784058,0.15414128511113984,0.12136775491988835,0.13865319612897795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592227651793542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331217096940754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091354482563778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553442074253412,0.0,0.1034054287928905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983372295253407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19615948154856375
mentalhealth,howdoyouspellgiraffe,2020/02/04,"Somethings wrong with me and I can’t get proper help So I’m f19 and I’m from Untied States of America.
Please delete this if unfit to be here.  
So I just want to say, I have been in therapy for YEARS. Two years ago was the first time since 12 I’ve been out of therapy. Insurance won’t cover therapy anymore and if I still wanted to continue, I would have to pay out of pocket for each session which would be 80-100 dollars a week. Something I don’t have.

I don’t know what’s exactly wrong with me. I feel absolutely crazy and I don’t know what to do. I wish I had someone to vent to that was unbiased of my situation. 

I am so so obsessive. Especially over attention and getting it from men. 
I constantly want to be looked at and make my male friends jealous and I hate that I do this because I have an amazing boyfriend that is so supportive and sweet and caring and I feel awful that I’m lowkey flirting behind his back. I wish I can stop it but I literally cannot. 

And I feel like I’m gonna stalk my ex also. 

 So, there’s a lot of history between he and I and we broke up around 2017. I haven’t talked to him until maybe late 2019 and asked if he wanted to be friends again. Some stuff happened (unrelated to our past relationship) and he blocked me. Kinda of made me crazy. But I ignored everything I could. Until I found out he hasn’t blocked me on insta. His insta is private but I was thinking of messaging him and asking if we wanted to be friends again. I haven’t done it yet; but today I learned that he has formed a new band and they’re playing live shows. I was thinking of taking a friend to one of his shows and acting like I didn’t know he was playing. I feel insane and absolutely disgusting. I just want his attention and I cannot believe I am considering such lengths. But I feel so so crazy about it. About him. I still really love him and care for him immensely. I know we couldn’t ever be in a relationship and last long and I’ve accepted that. I just want him in my life. Idk maybe I’m just overthinking stuff and this isn’t as crazy as I’m making it out to be. I feel so confused and distraught especially right now.",1.2854332084893871,3.3920998853932613,3.2486891385767787,89.38429463171036,81.6067415730337,6.921847690387017,23.372034956304606,8.021203637495839,1.2579503121098623,1679,60,368,33,45,565,202,445,0.146,0.73,0.124,-0.8938,0,0,2,0,0,0,39.0,4,0,0,1,28,26,3,3,7,1,44,2,0,3,2,92,88,48,0,17,13,1,6,2,4,4,1,1,0,2,19,36,0,4,17,5,2,1,13,10,0,3,12,9,63,16,50,63,4,40,0,1,1,1,37,13,0,8,27,249,82,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664549148496347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06914556554310626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574947109100489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769716654416126,0.16166512197466776,0.0,0.0,0.06648580195356242,0.0,0.052707907980472805,0.0,0.0,0.09741579252731418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763124777580113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343732111777356,0.0,0.06903480380377887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848312160342678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821201819344657,0.0,0.0,0.07770864555920977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26231405271191954,0.06177019902074605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735465915963353,0.0,0.09480377379146447,0.2672087860476744,0.0,0.09034818166624893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646020117211666,0.0,0.0,0.08536571409897507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05795527822463725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900743362647105,0.07048004266233082,0.0975356320371633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06107237699793645,0.0844842963826578,0.0,0.07634966708068483,0.07651829094271838,0.07260833629260555,0.0,0.0,0.07350895800172652,0.0780375149680514,0.0818147249538137,0.11543134369447842,0.0,0.17373026326683613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350787576014458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05859052880015676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825400726717848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491196853001166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055391321586399166,0.0,0.0,0.1856608576378185,0.0,0.07384014236159805,0.0,0.06875997731894272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152426183421304,0.09718963094876418,0.0,0.0,0.07326102259261105,0.13312906977835506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381011952206745,0.0722881268531813,0.0,0.0,0.19796214924625974,0.0,0.09811879931929383,0.0,0.0,0.06501048331155343,0.06949682569037029,0.0,0.0,0.2966387996194124,0.0,0.0,0.11080581828429517,0.0,0.0,0.050418098709079706,0.0,0.08195816026855893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446317470011977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3569926864798999,0.0,0.0693565423787547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19885963201165485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284368655678315,0.189070540010782,0.0,0.11136050343895104
mentalhealth,official_feel,2020/02/04,"Emotional numbness How do you deal with it?
I have been depressed for 2 years and now I feel nothingness. Often, I feel irritated or sad. Sometimes, I feel even angry. I don’t exactly remember how does happiness feel. Life now seems pretty bald and empty. Can’t stick to anything I try. It has been like this for while and it feels like it’s getting worse.
If you experienced anything like that could you share your advices / experiences? Cheers",2.3200813008130083,5.253097146341467,3.1920731707317067,84.34794715447156,89.73170731707317,6.635772357723577,25.1260162601626,7.793537801064563,2.015582113821138,354,15,63,8,12,112,58,82,0.2,0.58,0.21899999999999997,0.2168,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,4,0,0,6,9,0,0,0,0,8,3,1,2,1,18,15,8,0,2,2,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,6,10,6,4,12,0,4,0,2,0,0,6,0,0,4,7,41,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897379850925876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31956619784532586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550267459969308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20017790425244691,0.16723596403066374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16991706500455395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184120169875575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824563441597764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18993282386952945,0.0,0.0,0.4908839669816212,0.13871311897963098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144437181475296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066946433570005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714606770229765,0.28458092515054223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975378930554221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21995363850590308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676256788888706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920363706403164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318268142198469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19787301133347895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503734007697434
mentalhealth,juntayem,2020/02/04,"I have to many thoughts... I have so many things going on that would just go away if I wasn't in the equation. Functioning while having these thoughts is just draining. I go to work, come home, do homework and watch TV. I have few people that contact me. I am a waste but only matter to those who need to money. My son only wants to be home for the playstation and his room. He never hangs out with me (no he's not a teenager, yet). He doesn't notice if I run an errand. I just don't want to exist.",0.91057142857143,2.7168191523809533,2.4402380952380973,96.26892857142859,81.28571428571429,4.5809523809523816,19.07142857142857,4.935628992294339,-0.5328285714285719,381,9,87,1,10,124,73,105,0.035,0.953,0.012,-0.2693,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,0,12,0,0,0,1,20,21,7,0,6,7,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,6,5,0,0,2,1,1,6,6,0,0,0,3,1,12,0,12,16,1,14,0,0,1,0,7,5,0,2,3,62,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946756649890205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17848852809320626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532776699919095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4156864780978024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4201461491480025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363968212229845,0.15980906186372149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359039589229983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151770689691375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364967056222172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765761584534303,0.0,0.0,0.3289948219155812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24442943697831265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084751153970902,0.0,0.0,0.14719229549380286,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zebrasarenthorses,2020/02/04,"Grad school has killed my drive, my work ethic and my spirit. I'm a grad student and prior to starting I always struggled with mental health, from the time I was 7. From body dysmorphia, anorexia, anxiety (and especially social anxiety), hitting myself, depression and being suicidal, the 22 years haven't been easy. However, my anxiety always would impact me enough to feel the need to work hard when I was badly impacted. Granted this wasn't healthy, it's was never efficient and it was always self punishing. But eventually I learned how to somewhat cope with these traits and at least get outside help when I needed to. Until graduate school, the past 2.5 have been especially bad (it's 3 year program).

Now I want to stress I understand grad school is no picnic for anyone, ever. And I am not trying to say anyone's experience isn't bad. But when I say grad school has been hard, I don't just mean academically. I mean structurally. Like I ended up joining a 20+ student group to sue to the school because the advisers were constantly lying to us about what was actually required and claimed certain students failed classes, when they didn't (because no an administrator can't just decide a b is fail because they want it that way). This actually resulted in some students getting their tuition money back.

I took three classes, almost 4 except thank goodness I postponed one of them. I never needed to take because an adviser was concerned they wouldn't have enough students in them and lied and said they were required. And some of you are wondering isn't there a curriculum sheet? Yes and no. We did have a curriculum sheet but we switched after our first year from quarters to semesters. The advisers lied to us about what classes equated to each other so they could fill classes for the next two years. This action almost cost every student their financial aid.

Which wouldn't be so bad, except all of those classes sucked and taught me and my classmates absolutely nothing for our careers. One classes I was supposed to learn about principles of design and we learned about communism, another we were supposed to learn about eco-friendly design and we learned about film. Another classes we learned about geography when were supposed to learn about design. 

This program has made me feel like an absolute joke. It's full time with expectation that you do not work. But I feel like I have learned nothing but have felt like I had to stay because I got a full ride scholarship (although in retrospect I should have left anyways but mental illness has made me feel like there was no option). Many professors also give feedback in the form of never ever telling you that your work is good enough. It's meant to motivate students to push them to their limits, but it makes me feel like everything is hopeless and that I suck at everything. You can fix everything a professor says to fix down to a T and then show it to them and if there is still time left before the due date they'll tell you they hate all the edits and to redo it. And many times this makes the final project a jumbled mess of trash that has been changed to for the sake of being changed. I've see this happen so many times. 

Even right now I need an elective to be approved (despite it being on the approved elective list) and my adviser is ignoring the approval because the elective topic isn't something she likes (which it's my elective she shouldn't get to say ""no this isn't the field I want you to go into""). 

I still do my work, especially in group projects, because if one thing has happened is that we've bonded as a grad cohort and I can at least get myself to work to support my teammates (luckily this is most of my work). But I have no idea how to recover from this and my therapist doesn't even seem to know what to say anymore. I feel completely unprepared to graduate and terrified I will never get a job. 

Does anyone have any similar experiences? How do I get back up from this? Is there a type of therapy anyone can recommend? Historically CBT has been very very very very very very very ineffective for me (with all the 8 different therapists I tried it with) but EMDR has been great and acceptance/avoidance has been ok. My brain feels fuzzy most of the time, I cry every Sunday night because I'm so afraid of school, I can't keep my vision straight during classes, my health has declined drastically (within the past year I'd had two surgeries), I make simple mistakes all the time I never used to make, and my memory has become absolute trash. Please help.",7.0124436331909825,7.487049055035127,6.830517977682878,75.91600886256144,64.30444964871194,9.883050925288147,35.01207696193232,9.725611199111238,3.365026293796207,3639,156,645,68,51,1150,354,854,0.125,0.787,0.08900000000000001,-0.9808,3,1,1,0,0,1,89.0,10,7,14,18,39,35,5,3,37,2,82,5,2,12,12,134,137,55,2,17,17,0,10,7,0,7,3,6,0,1,37,40,0,5,26,3,4,7,27,20,0,8,32,17,91,15,89,91,18,76,1,4,1,0,52,20,2,12,54,444,128,66,0.0,0.0,0.09272896768901204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515204130726217,0.0,0.0,0.03799502236402928,0.11860041243354895,0.0,0.0,0.03230952830497013,0.09964014454222636,0.10903876919997632,0.0,0.047118756585703234,0.13288490717869467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306700038605378,0.15868086008890325,0.23170112232065446,0.052472847369871865,0.040428886048161576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05277469494654345,0.0,0.0530386767899662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052198039204988,0.0,0.04981502571064966,0.05134317837478065,0.0,0.03793415953458002,0.0,0.052189279496749535,0.0,0.0,0.0409216854721577,0.0,0.0,0.04963952666799544,0.0,0.0,0.04157773557124113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042081189818592615,0.1472766007812386,0.0,0.06276194890455143,0.08595395401150607,0.0800611717299597,0.0,0.1281011314048742,0.09295095494893067,0.0,0.0,0.16816310524600567,0.1357692326204583,0.04561860243364699,0.052046653272115835,0.0,0.0404133565262232,0.0,0.0,0.03670735687098125,0.0,0.1489371511822461,0.04557747162962995,0.02700194643071948,0.07970097910443133,0.037999379798249466,0.05238172466618767,0.0,0.0,0.08402873071250441,0.0,0.08512215188722466,0.0469078847043324,0.0,0.10100525269904677,0.0,0.0,0.06369206976507749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053634831632740784,0.0,0.0,0.04714794798331328,0.04223050756588236,0.05256456396892896,0.0,0.026111141764772614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032430201845461,0.0,0.0,0.16248243062868947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991328019116837,0.12685749117049253,0.14450796495805304,0.0,0.10350815724683513,0.0,0.0,0.09576106869343334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14091704578081302,0.1832194373205034,0.0,0.05052914290853123,0.04458643334234591,0.0,0.09117735440900683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965853023804302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071042755845192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05215348719165069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0405746606937939,0.04519442712149805,0.18891572116469885,0.0,0.28850575312397675,0.037860606815885066,0.04325279103885611,0.04956497766598776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048432109506283086,0.0,0.036576763410645904,0.0,0.0,0.03362896653542299,0.05064106131996933,0.07588567624973076,0.0,0.05442439590997585,0.04966945720115385,0.0,0.05196999674980608,0.05391561910277773,0.0,0.0,0.03572282253992047,0.0,0.08305449355494134,0.043742312872595966,0.054333673880850725,0.11032929688925697,0.03156460669242104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19393083866909155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05278715385280365,0.06451453740311518,0.0,0.09282389077191992,0.049461268122109055,0.11430124883872865,0.0410347817593226,0.0,0.2744144146804686,0.08407074677515597,0.03771250950981983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051524321132764915,0.24212315752595595,0.0,0.0,0.03375088902190719,0.0,0.0,0.15297961573525465
mentalhealth,foreignthrussy,2020/02/04,"Isolation? Social Media? Recently, I’ve been experiencing numerous of breakdowns and it seems to never stop coming even with the help of anti depressants and therapy. I feel awfully alone. A few days ago, I had to end a connection with someone I really clicked with but the relationship was too toxic so we mutually agreed to cut all forms of connection we have with each other and that’s been hurting me the most on top of dealing with this anxiety. I’m thinking of just abandoning my social media until I regain confidence to talk to others but I feel like I’ll be isolating myself again. There’s just a small number of people who do try their best to contact me and I appreciate them for that. I hate this feeling of guilt where I feel responsible for making the effort for any of my friendships or relationship to be validated. Idk. There’s so much to deal with and I just want to be alone. Advice?",3.7708139534883713,6.196961372093022,5.479244186046512,74.92607558139538,74.81395348837209,8.951162790697676,27.02906976744186,9.516144504307137,2.88833023255814,724,28,126,20,16,246,108,172,0.156,0.643,0.201,0.8746,0,3,0,0,0,0,13.0,2,0,2,3,11,8,2,1,7,1,9,0,0,1,2,34,20,11,0,1,6,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,15,0,2,6,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,4,6,18,2,28,13,7,13,0,3,1,0,14,4,0,3,9,97,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533709065157401,0.1391277783049844,0.0,0.0,0.3251082403514187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067322052960604,0.0,0.12006724651657807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471061240715815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519957052413098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122054658893764,0.32361961285334856,0.13518184770909442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390121870064443,0.0,0.0,0.10366479436084773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174369917474373,0.11212597621477977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495682676050027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10520108807734477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16801951709215324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667843358852336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476615182331038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537719883060545,0.0,0.12105044935188645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881020743139012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054696447741504,0.0,0.15497038573486438,0.3370137256725035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288248745731913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199839877545166,0.1329842514175914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312182398737056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615143787611907,0.0,0.0,0.17948738775762565,0.0,0.0,0.1005679983419781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065595694510716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257389047901744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheOfficialPutin420,2020/02/04,"How should I help my ex-stepmom My dad and stepmom recently got divorced. I’m concerned for my stepmoms mental health, I’d rather be depressed than have her be depressed. She’s kind of a bitch sometimes, but she’s the first person I’ve admitted to cutting my wrist. I know she hasn’t taken the divorce very well, they were married for about 2 years. I know she loves me, and I love her, however, I haven’t seen her in about a month, and we haven’t texted. She broken down crying in front of me once, real crying (believe me, I know when someone’s fake crying because my biological mom is a narcissistic). I’ve been through this before too, just not because of a divorce. I know I tend to cheer her up, but since I’m still a minor I can’t control whether I am with her or not. She’s invited me to her house when my dad is working so she can watch me, but I feel really weird because she’s dating someone else and he lives in the house with her. I don’t know what to do, or how to help her. I’ve been in the same boat as her, but I have my ways of coping.",3.322615844544096,3.8299969865470866,4.600825112107625,88.55609566517192,72.40807174887892,7.202272047832588,27.422720478325854,7.0316486544052195,1.1485093572496259,820,28,184,7,15,272,117,223,0.14,0.748,0.11199999999999999,-0.6648,1,0,0,0,3,0,28.0,1,0,1,3,12,11,2,0,9,0,18,4,1,3,0,31,33,17,0,2,11,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,7,0,1,7,0,0,1,7,6,1,1,6,3,44,5,24,24,1,16,0,2,2,2,32,6,1,2,8,122,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23707811453682084,0.0,0.11031227334160353,0.14605747855421142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14539988696039874,0.0,0.0,0.42720331634825537,0.0,0.0,0.22331380330520176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829579997382394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655487988385747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026990025056928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368324188112316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779898648953312,0.0,0.0,0.17378705416834514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29916937734381194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349978853576791,0.3562278965818719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144726083209925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23400646595723734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13064447500000373,0.0,0.0,0.15183029862401806,0.10347570562471124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13806009343364956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319478181994955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14755626971284727,0.08304933476188164,0.0,0.12800175032597422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072377801168867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196834816732544,0.0,0.12821516158077495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352896504742293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696481395239048,0.0,0.10290050169794973,0.0,0.0,0.11656000793864453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943779084217785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348253358540539
mentalhealth,gaia3E,2020/02/04,"It hit me that I’m still alive I just broke down crying in bed, I’m not sure whether they were tears of joy or sadness or something else. It hit me that I’m soon to turn 18 and I did not believe I would be alive by 16 still. I don’t know what I’m feeling, but I’m alive.",-1.5510714285714289,0.07260300000000086,0.6975892857142867,106.345625,89.3125,3.6571428571428566,16.955357142857142,3.1291,-1.3475642857142862,208,5,59,0,7,69,43,64,0.139,0.693,0.168,0.4251,0,0,1,0,2,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,12,15,5,0,1,7,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,1,7,2,5,9,0,5,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3664775083454181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3573031852070902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717284683505611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447059548874593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787645702701875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25041529979358884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5195356996126296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3065711597822627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35380962852351355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23106853107350395,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lucyboop,2020/02/04,"My mental 180 – a very long rant I struggled immensely in 2019. 
That isn’t to say that my life was easy beforehand, but I *was* resilient. 
I was the type of person who could trudge through hell and back, turn my emotions on and off. I genuinely believed that depression was something I had control over. Anxiety was something I had control over. Panic attacks could be avoided and I could keep everything under control so long as I tried hard enough. I squirmed at the idea of my friends taking anti depressants. I gave tough-love advice. I thought that working 110 hours a week meant I was conquering my sadness. I thought chasing after men who would clearly never loved me would eventually bring me happiness. At least I never thought money could make me happy. And going into 2019 I was making a lot of it – more than I knew what to do with. The more I had the less I wanted it. 
My first payment towards my student loans I paid it off in full. The next month I paid off 3 years worth of credit card debt. The same month I bought a new (used) car so I could travel with my work gear. 
After that everything I made went to paying it forward. The thing was, I knew I wasn’t very good, but I couldn’t help but believe the things I believed. So the only way I could sleep at night was to give everything I had to the people around me. Thousands of dollars to get my friends on their feet. We had all just graduated college. Thousands on Christmas for my family. I would buy everyone in the office breakfast every morning and once a week I would walk downtown and talk to the men sleeping on the streets that night and go buy them warm food. I thought if I continued to do this everything would balance out. I wouldn’t be so sad anymore if everyone around me was happy. 
To this day I don’t regret it – but it didn’t work out the way I thought it would. 

In March of 2019 I lost my grandma – my best friend. Five years prior to that I’d lost my mom, her daughter. Those two were my world. 

I figured because I saw it coming and got to say goodbye, however short, it would be easier this time around. I have never been so wrong. 

It took a few weeks to chip away at me bit by bit but eventually it broke me, and for the first time in my life I stayed broken. I couldn’t for the life of me get myself back on my feet. My ability to **control** slipped right through my fingers and the more I tried to grasp at it the more fleeting it became. 
It started to take things from me. My work, my concentration, my time, my money, my motivation. 
My depression became *Depression* , anxiety became *Anxiety* , panic became *Panic* . 
I lost all control. I was bound and confined by unexplainable urges and emotions, completely and totally. I would sleep on the floor and in the closet. I would think of a hundred ways to die. Eventually the only thing that got me out of bed in the morning was the promise to myself that if I got out of bed I could go find a way to kill my self. 
I got a puppy instead. 
And it worked. I still had 8 diagnoses brooding over me, but I couldn’t kill my self. I wanted to just the same, but who would feed him in the morning? 
It hasn’t even been a year since things got bad, but it feels like a lifetime. 
Everything I thought I knew has been balled up and dunked in the trash. I understand more now that I’ve felt it myself. 
I’m unemployed now. The stress of my workplace just broke my brain one day. All of the medical and mental health professionals I see want me to consider disability. It isn’t any stigma attached to it (which is prevalent where I am) that is stopping me, but rather, admitting to myself that this is more than just a hiatus is still a struggle to me. 
My money had run out before I even left. My dog got sick and it cost nearly $17,000 to get him better. Worth every penny and not everyone will understand. How do you tell someone that, selfishly, a dog was your lifeline. If he dies I die. He deserves, in my eyes, to live regardless of the price. 
By the time he’s old and grey I will be better, and resilient enough to let him go on his own time. 
So we live a really simple life right now. I’ve isolated myself almost completely. It is easier to process my day when my day is simple and undisputed. I ration what money I had left before I stopped working, the bills are piling up but I think I can make it work. I take my medication at morning and at night. I’ve been working on feeding myself two meals a day. I have passions and I have hobbies and the cocktail I’m on means I’m not depressed anymore, barely anxious. 
This week I’ll be going to my first PTSD group session at the hospital. I am slowly coming to terms with the fact that this isn’t going away next week. 
My dog is, as usual, as happy as could be. 
I’m really trying to be better. God, it’s a lot of work. I hate that I’m not alone in that struggle. I hate that there are so many people going through the same or worse. 
I hate how hard people have to fight for the chance to not even be happy, but just to.. not suffer. 
I really hope you’re all going to keep pushing forward.",2.3472651093807926,4.358836106403942,3.616993484824409,88.56952857672549,77.59113300492609,6.493670215583452,24.510037607924147,7.4822170145007005,1.139570898882356,3948,138,808,54,93,1286,380,1015,0.159,0.732,0.109,-0.9961,4,2,2,0,1,0,128.0,2,2,2,26,33,53,8,8,53,0,86,24,8,13,10,154,161,55,5,33,27,2,6,1,3,13,9,2,3,5,59,41,6,12,23,3,19,20,19,33,0,9,56,12,141,20,120,72,27,139,1,14,4,2,38,62,1,9,57,570,200,19,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03747099289733112,0.0,0.0,0.03839769864022839,0.039714600512652014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026076403911420583,0.0,0.08800311043926201,0.04331974789584648,0.07605729906887554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240745926191967,0.0,0.04362379123175676,0.07205413069645178,0.05897098207928862,0.03201707373775976,0.023375194444704376,0.0,0.06525876529856274,0.12960748279866685,0.04024146644129197,0.10174101720787404,0.08372718758255884,0.0,0.0,0.04280650419429655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606288326674277,0.08040951381446686,0.0,0.21503992280629688,0.2449274917855881,0.0,0.0,0.12364908275184533,0.0,0.16513555831515295,0.03892009770453383,0.11939040721903975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08626754556541619,0.0,0.07924275655203232,0.0,0.07598095743406133,0.0,0.06461584433997716,0.10992293357838047,0.17231329885584726,0.0,0.03614893127573194,0.0,0.01938874773146375,0.027394189379190657,0.03681790373743411,0.0,0.03504729255629186,0.09785054720516592,0.04636779573178075,0.0,0.0888774223430358,0.0,0.060102166688814365,0.03678470785018295,0.1743420466868703,0.032162569871735616,0.1840114470226176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040986550312304,0.06870046487429257,0.11357537658564555,0.0,0.040759706265199265,0.0,0.0,0.025702327212450384,0.0,0.0,0.03808595124528202,0.0377628091460026,0.0,0.0,0.04328764939478368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681668740117665,0.08484771356260527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833254719770401,0.039211095770702725,0.10833886164147846,0.01873378142991652,0.0,0.06771994496388066,0.06786950944913824,0.0,0.0,0.12557664632439305,0.06520031822756292,0.034608508594868484,0.03628364656293929,0.07678819575437064,0.0388765405578921,0.0,0.041769729520936806,0.0,0.0772585556163161,0.07728693166514394,0.0,0.0,0.04491004274942567,0.06121437427506505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872374750065984,0.03703453444368871,0.08156221454821215,0.10795457926500827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040237381739911364,0.04083693936115383,0.02598405164987978,0.058327294583294824,0.0,0.13497131791349573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975228032052432,0.0334820028453904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044824093599284014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736957486404652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06549406916952442,0.0,0.060988109808464114,0.0,0.0,0.030556573477138374,0.0,0.08000589580133348,0.0,0.0,0.031719975084347485,0.0,0.1151202357269236,0.0,0.03249020334775203,0.0590408159144652,0.0,0.0,0.027141297335697725,0.040871434488859486,0.06124588159570485,0.06411747633249211,0.04392489166006438,0.12026181402088745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649362571446183,0.03082083649390859,0.033515848639981104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737595944569785,0.04914077692022155,0.0,0.1826533061908235,0.11179848584520362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042603504830129764,0.07810267854745942,0.04170913111866676,0.0749163913985654,0.07983849181263243,0.0,0.033118389518812234,0.04223239213441148,0.06327846827439892,0.06785189586647399,0.12174818786693035,0.15379311437634746,0.0,0.0,0.03554686576504662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25124526173049794,0.0,0.039077563718367785,0.2723969864856857,0.04192502421225525,0.0,0.07408015763905966
mentalhealth,scottsteinberg,2020/02/04,"My friend and I are PhDc's in neuroscience and recently created a new Neuroscience-based podcast ft. First-hand perspectives from the authors themselves! This episode explores a recent article on how it's possible to study human depression using rats and mice! Would love your feedback! https://youtu.be/vG1lL8xfT8U

Is it possible to study major depressive disorder, a uniquely human mental-health
disorder, using knowledge gleaned from experiments in rats and mice? This is a hotly
debated topic by scientists and non-scientists alike. In this episode, recent
Neuroscience PhD graduate, Dr. Stephen Daniels, joins us to speak about his recently
published manuscript that addresses these controversial concepts, entitled ""Reverse
Translation of Major Depressive Disorder Symptoms: A Framework for the Behavioural
Phenotyping of Putative Biomarkers"", published in The Journal of Affective Disorders
[2020 Feb; 263(15): 353-366] / DOI: 10.1016/j.jad.2019.11.108.

Highlights

• Reverse translation of biomarkers of depression.

• Basic bio-behavioural functions in humans and animals.

• Battery of tests in animals to study clinical biomarkers.

Abstract

Background
Reverse translating putative biomarkers of depression from patients to animals is
complex because Major Depressive Disorder (MDD) is a highly heterogenous condition. This review proposes an approach to reverse translation based on relating relevant
bio-behavioural functions in laboratory rodents to MDD symptoms.

Methods
This systematic review outlines symptom clusters assessed by psychometric tests of
MDD and antidepressant treatment response including the Montgomery–Åsberg
Depression Rating Scale, the Hamilton Depression Rating Scale, and the Beck
Depression Inventory. Symptoms were related to relevant behavioural assays in
laboratory rodents.

Results
The resulting battery of tests includes passive coping, anxiety-like behaviours, sleep,
caloric intake, cognition, psychomotor functions, hedonic reactivity and aversive
learning. These assays are discussed alongside relevant clinical symptoms of MDD, providing a framework through which reverse translation of a biomarker can be
interpreted.

Limitations
Certain aspects of MDD may not be quantified by tests in laboratory rodents, and their biological significance may not always be of clinical relevance.

Conclusions
Using this reverse translation approach, it is possible to clarify the functional significance of a putative biomarker in rodents and hence translate its contribution to specific clinical symptoms, or clusters of symptoms.

Keywords
Major depressive disorder, Montgomery–Åsberg depression rating scale, Hamilton
rating scale for depression, Beck Depression inventory, Antidepressant drug treatment
response, Reverse translation.",13.758280701754387,17.885182126315797,11.366315789473688,36.13254385964916,51.42105263157895,15.27719298245614,61.08771929824561,13.401458687273335,10.965103508771927,2328,184,174,97,30,709,196,380,0.152,0.8,0.048,-0.9922,0,0,2,0,0,0,76.0,1,1,1,2,2,16,0,0,18,0,15,15,1,7,1,32,19,13,0,1,3,0,1,0,1,3,13,1,1,3,14,11,0,1,6,0,0,3,2,13,0,0,1,2,6,3,47,12,4,21,0,13,0,1,11,13,0,3,5,115,20,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050453118110084814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03696248979287817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6789220790471122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4169572892931431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031726707211729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0593125952801112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05157603944720511,0.0,0.0,0.046846395566077316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445209387892188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406413134753171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054725390572071465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06110574672551958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058561592058497675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20507031491113006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23947870848245054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067871860311786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4411603539336704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293635354373285,0.15710733069298433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04307331370614087,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TurfSwinger,2020/02/04,"Divorce as a kid My parents divorced when my brother and I were a young age. My parents had joint custody over us and when my brother was 17 he stopped going over to my dad's (I do not want to share his story). Back in October, I believe, I left too because of the fights he had with his girlfriend and occasional times he came home drunk. As a 17 year-old now, I experience mental issues such as depression, anxiety, and adhd. I started experiencing adhd as far back as 5th grade. Depression and anxiety followed when I was 16. My question is that is this normal for someone to go through as someone who lived through a divorce, and will it ever go away?",4.594704861111111,5.7301170468750025,5.81291666666667,78.71819444444445,69.9375,8.188888888888886,35.31597222222222,8.515128840125781,2.995689930555556,514,27,96,8,9,172,82,128,0.163,0.8370000000000001,0.0,-0.951,3,0,0,0,4,0,16.0,1,0,0,0,9,4,1,0,5,0,9,1,0,0,1,14,16,15,0,2,1,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,4,8,1,1,1,1,0,5,1,3,0,0,6,1,16,1,18,9,0,23,0,2,0,0,20,6,0,1,12,68,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3713067016306791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363515311977724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513780280798674,0.2375691354732724,0.0,0.09416876809481564,0.0,0.0,0.17404456990924255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668245367724705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661045174528679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973480803326133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110978890579568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26338137746514223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495470913508372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612356046780297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784153529842824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640750257249906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556781733292411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513563051980593,0.0,0.0,0.16209938611512595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430605804905716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17305147310844313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617785645929464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934080315968384,0.0,0.0,0.1291510916382377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007775924014697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18581882879179404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111552650051656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947920364387823
mentalhealth,demopan_,2020/02/04,"I broke up with my ex and she blackmailed me I'm honestly really done, i am a gay man and i broke up with my ex because i didnt know I was actually gay til now i thought she'd be understanding and considerate. But she told someone that goes to my school I was gay. I go to a very religious Catholic school and now I am too afraid to go there. I don't know if this is the right sub or not to post this. I just don't understand and I'm very scared. Can someone please help me.",-0.502714285714287,1.4812689428571453,1.9825000000000017,96.43375000000003,88.14285714285714,6.166666666666668,20.17857142857143,7.492282038375204,0.4328571428571433,369,12,94,7,12,126,62,105,0.08900000000000001,0.8,0.11,0.2748,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,2,3,0,12,3,0,0,0,18,22,9,0,1,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,6,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,6,0,19,1,9,14,0,9,0,2,0,3,8,3,0,2,3,59,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.1945692238334236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121542136871553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040382190985508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266281137362135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364234378297568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21915156453006887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21886285970782574,0.0,0.0,0.1909539733331006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12772997160586494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702721476415502,0.0,0.0,0.19961734741940235,0.4035728485987171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3378734454268202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15828797484161072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905191743596797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4151298472602741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32902401176695256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashmiquet,2020/02/04,How do you all cope with anxiety? I’m an undergrad and my anxiety is just constant right now. What are some coping mechanisms that have helped you with anxiety and helped you focus on your work? How do I stop feeling so mentally and physically exhausted?,4.988617021276597,7.327288234042555,6.064840425531916,72.50875,70.91489361702128,11.508510638297873,33.026595744680854,11.20814326018867,4.7076851063829785,205,10,35,8,4,68,36,47,0.203,0.767,0.03,-0.7808,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,4,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,2,1,12,7,6,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,0,3,7,2,5,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,3,27,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6778946143533869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3192008159979914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149352989918318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3959739401641706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976735394589235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522528836793301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469508843197409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21504013887032072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heyo556,2020/02/04,"School is making my mental health really bad The title basically says it all, no one really cares about this, right now I am crying because I have to go back to school tomorrow, I told my friends that school makes me feel really bad and you know what they said? “You don’t have motives, they don’t bully you but I mean it’s tough I guess” 
When they tell me that I just feel like shit, like I’m just being petty about school but no, I know I’m not, teachers make us do so much work and I don’t even learn, I’m a ver smart person honestly. I wouldn’t consider this to be product of me being lazy or stuff, I like learning, I genuinely love when I can do a math problem and another one after that. But the school environment is just bad for me, I’m constantly googling stuff about everything to learn more about stuff around (honestly I fucking wish that were a lie lmao). I know there’s probably not a solution for this but I just want to vent and talk to someone that understands me and won’t just tell me to ignore it and that I can’t feel like this",3.279637096774195,4.399013723502304,4.381402649769587,87.80638968894009,73.0552995391705,8.374308755760369,24.161578341013822,8.841846274778883,1.451497926267281,826,23,182,16,16,270,112,217,0.16899999999999998,0.6779999999999999,0.153,-0.2238,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,3,3,2,17,18,2,0,6,0,18,4,1,4,1,41,42,14,0,4,12,0,3,4,1,2,1,2,0,1,17,7,0,1,12,0,0,1,10,8,0,2,3,5,31,10,16,34,3,10,0,0,0,2,16,2,2,2,11,120,48,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729666299082917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109092600023766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868159316901394,0.2563112515483944,0.06237635781856087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432713630547813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057695133355083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239918528066413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758468397650146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196309371247996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552157526234715,0.1462019717447041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790560254115378,0.0945977947982406,0.0,0.0,0.058153643987249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127225012505524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087666683839498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687053982776954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19996326559446725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235228912370903,0.0,0.20490815535018733,0.0,0.0,0.11146190038101353,0.0,0.0,0.10311951234561488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522063366968393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386761087376586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934622532901706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032363468133642,0.09791118618767428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19665600633948074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738497348494459,0.09733448778496956,0.08137293080255598,0.0,0.5177917111300461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050351211108144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669962315869909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514128618183098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822449426018332,0.17887308465438762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777590304928728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652391244872032,0.12308435151740042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06035392411739201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176686766492592,0.0,0.0,0.0744938038340513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,little_baked,2020/02/04,"How to cope So my job just changed my shifts and now I'll be working an extra 2 and a half hours a week and getting about $150 less in my paycheck due to it and they are also talking of removing my Sunday shifts with another $150 a week less I'll be earning. I use to earn $1100 a week 3 years ago at the same job and soon I'll be earning $600 whilst also doing more hours 6 feel so powerless and frankly like a slave or a pawn on a chess board. I can't leave this work I need at least 600 a week every week to pay for my house and food, fuel etc (not bills) and yet I hate knowing I use to earn 400 more than what I will be 3 years ago. How do I mentally get through this? I just want to break shit I'm so angry with them.",1.347449799196788,1.86057762048193,3.2399397590361474,96.47247991967873,77.01204819277109,6.497188755020081,22.26706827309237,6.42735559955562,0.10233092369477914,559,14,147,4,12,189,99,166,0.109,0.858,0.033,-0.9255,3,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,6,13,3,2,0,10,0,9,2,1,4,0,23,19,16,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,10,1,0,2,1,2,1,2,2,0,1,0,1,15,1,17,14,8,23,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,1,18,86,19,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24842141693213085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22411284778781615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14693132914489926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482317017416821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15627434022758122,0.0,0.0,0.1180597883436006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085046947248125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16943745627623186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464171138570775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383425903012896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759861331582765,0.16168328948939645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27810118885192875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700801283689522,0.0,0.0,0.14837017236212258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845708798152653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121116712651227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389953231637916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383438889452235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262567162005932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24204280524755725,0.0,0.0,0.08264825803983065,0.0,0.5619916513492441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040226285757289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18046941521672485
mentalhealth,onetwopikachu,2020/02/04,"Biting fingers, how to stop this I have been biting my fingernails/finger tips for years. Tried to stop biting my fingernails, keeping them cut extremely short, filing them every morning, but now I only bite the skin around my nails, and one thumb knuckle. Every time I touch things it hurts. I have bandaids on several fingers because I bit my skin so far it is bright red/bleeding. Keeping my nails done/painting only stops me from biting the nails, but now my fingers are super callused from me biting them, which of course makes me want to bite them more. One time I stopped for months when I got my nails professionally done, but trying that again, I bit off the acrylic. Once I bite one, I have to bite them all or it drives me crazy. 

Any time I feel an uneven surface, rough surface, or uneven shape in general, I immediately bite it off. So much worse when I'm nervous. Watching shows, even stopping while eating to do so. My psychiatrist doesn't say anything, just noting it down as a symptom I guess. I have been diagnosed with adhd, GAD, PTSD (not related to finger biting). Basically just ADHD and anxiety. 

Sigh what is wrong with me.",5.109929906542057,6.7703601214953295,5.230922897196262,81.38180490654206,69.2803738317757,7.592990654205607,28.79556074766355,8.07648339933343,1.9556925233644853,902,33,163,12,16,283,126,214,0.14400000000000002,0.8029999999999999,0.053,-0.9529,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,5,1,13,7,1,1,5,0,12,10,6,2,1,27,20,15,0,1,8,0,9,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,10,5,1,7,1,1,0,1,2,4,1,3,4,12,32,2,20,16,5,28,0,1,2,0,6,11,0,3,16,106,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898528079253003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200570761807399,0.0,0.09225143887014907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923574572327784,0.10735115407617957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351087855747307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26330729067944186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122396867438728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468119967495352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233942356941171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964891939656407,0.0,0.20320547482079854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609742042249411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644727710011286,0.0,0.13284408371881984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290946753566019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21437283907842627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049512694750119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625422462155096,0.0,0.08864792783818043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284249975818602,0.2451458279567151,0.1834290909896544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096389695582895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958984436297496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623299409316186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5040954875518995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253397522890835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011500146537266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21095195426888969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374613214583272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711274293886451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289207037906122,0.0,0.13184683321786975,0.0,0.07765635896071434
mentalhealth,bevegs,2020/02/04,"How to be the best version of yourself/how to be likeable? Sometimes I feel like if I should just never talk, I don't know why but I feel like I always say the wrong things and make people feel bad or uncomfortable. Maybe I should never get close to people, I just weird them out.  I act like I deserve to be treated right and I act like I'm smart and all but I am the most stubborn, dumb, and arrogant person. I wish I could be the most optimal person I can be, make everyone happy, but I feel like I am loud and I hurt people. I constantly seek to feel validated and important, and that is my biggest flaw. Gosh- even this is an example of me trying to feel validated and important. I'm not surprised.",1.3861771561771548,3.6282110209790233,3.393734265734268,87.71111421911422,82.14685314685316,6.610536130536129,22.82004662004661,7.793537801064563,1.1885537529137529,548,19,114,10,15,185,78,143,0.19399999999999998,0.5529999999999999,0.253,0.7338,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,1,4,16,2,0,5,0,14,0,0,3,3,38,27,14,0,5,8,0,6,5,0,2,0,2,0,2,3,10,0,1,7,0,0,2,4,6,0,0,0,8,21,10,9,19,5,9,0,1,0,0,5,4,1,4,8,76,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006258856143533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047787878543327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142565981425896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592850246034876,0.0,0.11520550296170272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530357307395113,0.0,0.0,0.1378772877649206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4377505361280549,0.3092469212973988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538666829647556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153601626572904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15446768040944253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792991661558439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35246916485756985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926321981831956,0.0,0.14496081147861034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225739300708875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001019281155057,0.2519805971863764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322466742588152,0.0,0.11474687163854085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142708579247323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597652657430498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586126157543597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796486624531923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13020117961132754,0.0,0.1659287972324748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776076310070256,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whodatroundassho,2020/02/04,"My empathy is declining. Why am I like this? Before, whenever my friends are feeling bad or sad, I can easily empathize with them. But now, I just don't feel anything like that anymore. They have also noticed this and told me. I wonder why I can't empathize with people anymore?",2.4487421383647816,5.14568069811321,3.885188679245285,82.94086477987422,81.64150943396227,6.552201257861638,29.58805031446541,7.793537801064563,2.409669182389938,219,11,38,4,6,72,41,53,0.114,0.6729999999999999,0.213,0.5803,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,9,11,4,0,0,3,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,10,3,2,10,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,28,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19765757817923105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4902420756232518,0.0,0.0,0.20339554684152186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20637225981911414,0.0,0.0,0.2103190156910934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499478695135034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19095888906089545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415044448043765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813987301353293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713529313586554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361765308339516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4460555238585896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680396509536698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DoctorOfMI,2020/02/04,"Filling Other's Buckets. Does Mine Need to be Full First? One of the strongest predictors of success in mental health counseling is the Therapeutic Alliance which includes three aspects: 

Agreed upon Goals

Agreed upon Tasks

Warm/Caring Relationship

Students and mental health workers often focus most on the importance of the Relationship, saying that before they can do the work of mental health counseling, they first need to build a relationship. This would be an example of a “step-wise” process. Think of a flight of stairs where we usually take one step at a time – Step 1 comes first, then Step 2, then Step 3. 

The idea that the relationship must be built prior to doing the work of mental health counseling strikes me as inconsistent on two levels. 

First, research shows that the relationship alone is not a great predictor of success. 

Second, having practiced mental health therapy since 1993 - I have no idea how a step-wise process would even unfold. Would I sit and gaze in the client’s eyes and bond? Review their family photo albums? Go to a bar with them? Play checkers? Any idea I can muster developing a relationship FIRST and then WORKING seem inefficient and creepy – probably leading me to lose my license! 

motivational interviewing, motivational interviewing training

​

The work of therapy happens in a PARALLEL not STEP-WISE process. As we help clients clarify their goals and identify credible plans, the relationship strengthens. And, as the relationship improves clients trust more and share more, allowing for further clarification of goals and development of credible plans. The process is like a feedback loop that happens in a parallel fashion. 

Life is also like this. I tend to disagree, for example, that we cannot get into a relationship until we are healed. Or, we cannot fill others buckets until our bucket is full. It is with people, that we learn to heal ourselves – not in isolation (of course, not all people are worthy of our trust and not all people can help us heal ourselves). Further, we fill our bucket by filling other people’s buckets. The idea that relationships develop in a parallel with meeting needs is encouraging because we can immediately do things that help other people. We don’t have to wait on the sideline. 

Dr. Brad Lundahl is a published author, researcher, professor, psychologist, husband and father. You can find his insights and motivational interviewing training at [www.esympro.com](https://www.esympro.com).

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mentalhealth,rslashhelpp,2020/02/04,"How sad is too sad? Ok so I’m a 16 y/o girl, and a jr in a highly competitive high school. I’m constantly battling the stresses of keeping my grades up and comparing myself to my friends and my siblings as well as worrying about my weight, feeling completely insecure, wishing I would have a boyfriend but knowing I’m too ugly, and wanting to have fun but feeling too suffocated by homework and studying. It has decently become a routine for me and my friends to be genuinely frustrated and sad in a bad mood all day at least 3 times a week, crying actual tears throughout the day and crying ourselves to sleep. But I’m not sad alllll of the time so I dind myself asking, how sad is too sad to be okay ? Is it just due to the fact that I’m a teenage girl w hormones trying to figure out who I am ? Is the education system today putting wayyy to much pressure on teenagers? Or may there actually be a problem?",6.277845303867407,5.856546093922652,7.3109889502762435,74.88449447513814,65.96132596685085,10.333922651933703,37.43701657458564,9.888512548439397,3.662866961325968,717,35,138,14,10,243,112,181,0.278,0.619,0.10300000000000001,-0.9915,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,12,20,2,3,14,2,13,2,1,2,2,29,25,18,0,4,6,0,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,4,9,1,1,4,0,0,1,1,13,1,0,0,3,11,6,21,20,3,18,0,6,0,0,6,8,0,2,8,90,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.3125652674057896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497179948645648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337179920739749,0.0,0.17687234074159386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16791351419218406,0.17306451994588626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3518330141736276,0.2065661240972912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16195261545233108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24746193346219156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3384130970433907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423480733041349,0.0,0.0,0.08801387755493936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772817661431888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532412698175082,0.0,0.16099429931491474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207966097450344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026497710326545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834505040329044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18676871180142204,0.0,0.15180282881449267,0.0,0.0,0.108730875245983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446021777829278,0.0,0.12846212378837635,0.19501872628375655,0.14399347110308106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18416381344737714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263940746048833,0.0,0.11376548143720575,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HippedHawk11003,2020/02/04,i need help i’m just sad for no reason and i’ve been like this for the past few weeks and i feel like i’m in a hole that i can’t get out of. does anyone know what that is?,-2.7809302325581413,-1.3281509534883718,0.11283720930232732,109.57111627906977,93.41860465116278,3.44,8.6,3.1291,-2.5549869767441864,131,0,41,0,5,45,33,43,0.12300000000000001,0.698,0.179,0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,8,9,2,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,3,2,5,8,1,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26128664807761226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3270110170587882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889444892379825,0.2669579898623491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952330520842221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504706933446346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20536546562123445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36512360806340266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770799433193369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3567210763907582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842066049843384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29974459255047353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Artecanid,2020/02/04,"How do I know which type of professional help I need? Hello, I’ve needed mental help for years and the very few times that I’ve deemed myself worthy enough to get help have been bad experiences. The first time I saw a psychiatrist who prescribed Prozac  and tried to scam me out of the money that my insurance was supposed to cover. The second time I saw a counselor who I felt wasn’t really equipped with the knowledge to truly help me and I genuinely felt like she didn’t know what to say to me. I was very confused about that.

I understand that mental health is not something that you can fix in one 45 min session, so I wanted to know if I’m just going to the wrong people. 

I have depression, childhood trauma, social anxiety, and unhealthy eating habits along with a sense of impending doom. 
I’m tired of trying to fix my mind on my own. But at the same time I want effective meetings if I am to invest time and money on a professional.
Can I get some guidance ?",6.141137553545931,6.07618964397906,6.565064255116612,78.92085673488815,66.17277486910993,9.458543550690148,29.40552118039029,9.095868883498916,2.254796858638743,766,23,149,12,11,249,115,191,0.15,0.7340000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.8382,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,2,4,7,0,1,11,0,12,4,0,2,0,31,29,10,0,6,5,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,9,9,1,0,8,0,3,1,3,6,0,3,9,5,22,1,24,20,5,15,1,2,2,0,12,5,0,4,10,98,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653127376132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11627383272143775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994190625392745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249474332646356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388977417461693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622013116105694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674172421492477,0.0,0.0,0.11845198857150654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14551213795093362,0.0,0.07914299936815775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802374841850005,0.0,0.0,0.3733643017259977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22959612354169984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803396794045996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806767363435794,0.0,0.14060993818670073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20651469874233755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09436419142203338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654331495224998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921164188715079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107428076648802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14195504097784314,0.0,0.10720689232257216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4060095731467303,0.1600555109756659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18909281247676651,0.0,0.0,0.14497151610088774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298033260400355,0.16427485023418073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522557399225668,0.0,0.0896769843058582
mentalhealth,TelaSeeker,2020/02/04,"Having a real bad time recently, what should I do? Hello Reddit, I’m a male college student and have recently fallen into what I think is some temporary depression. This semester I’m taking a heavier course load than normal while also working a job and an internship. Over break I was a little bit worried but I reassured myself that I’ll step up to the plate like I’ve always done in the past. The semester has been going on for about a month now and during the week I find myself going through the motions, doing the bare minimum(even less sometimes), handing in assignments late, and generally having an awful time. The things that normally bring me joy throughout the day no longer do so and I find myself in a constant state of pain. All I can do is lay down and watch TV in my free time now unless I’m with friends or drinking/smoking. I’ve felt this way in the past but never for over a day or 2. I know I’ve shown signs of seasonal depression in the past but this is a new level. What should I do, Reddit? 
Also as a lil background info I’ve been diagnosed with mild ADHD and I drink and smoke relatively often but I don’t consider myself dependent on any substances",5.3342857142857145,6.0773409567099606,6.353662337662339,76.93906493506495,68.00432900432901,9.276883116883116,30.118614718614715,9.3871,2.7101830303030305,935,34,170,18,15,312,138,231,0.105,0.8059999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.2194,1,0,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,0,22,1,20,4,1,1,2,36,30,20,0,4,7,0,2,1,1,2,2,0,0,1,9,11,1,0,6,2,1,6,3,4,0,0,5,3,17,6,25,23,4,44,0,2,1,0,4,15,0,5,21,119,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190845976569318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21547266742318133,0.11209866290599448,0.0,0.0,0.09161489866166786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124864063270376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708043777161878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558553871087887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737677974984452,0.0,0.232069996950074,0.1367389774761634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786635544931858,0.0,0.13197528956871735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898194882985573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935328549512068,0.0,0.2462651036406335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408510913962517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15313009602418806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368980307683345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403913743773544,0.0,0.15197115417872792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581787477605218,0.13502583282845193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753301557411664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039051392179168,0.13011437971148335,0.0,0.0,0.2639959488242016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14335264078695575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3858193107872959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334199030869805,0.0,0.0,0.26604146602755946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324251218066369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129342452827196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950264504408492,0.08632377595075501,0.0,0.0,0.2356706926161029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693525774834192,0.10806505863548567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807849132219904,0.1368157133429598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Runaway2823,2020/02/04,Diagnosis after 30 Has anyone been diagnosed on the spectrum at an older age?  Lately I have been feeling like some of my mental health issues and idiosyncrasies align with some mild autism symptoms.  I have a therapy appointment scheduled but it feels kind of odd as a working mother to tell someone you think you may be autistic.  I say this as I sit in my locked closet mind you.,7.678098591549298,7.790821845070425,7.619823943661974,72.04691901408455,62.94366197183098,9.916901408450704,34.651408450704224,9.516144504307137,3.298715492957747,305,12,51,5,4,98,59,71,0.05,0.907,0.044000000000000004,-0.3377,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,0,7,3,0,0,0,10,10,4,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,3,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,9,2,10,6,2,9,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,3,6,36,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849757743797187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591036317155959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581542826422332,0.18237194597860076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27135049868448297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664457959745134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658346367151209,0.0,0.0,0.2879667428446532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12471681960068964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572620042043359,0.0,0.2577598341793309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203008749654318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162977530655096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653334656027224,0.0,0.0,0.2231258042714961,0.0,0.2919347085217095,0.0,0.0,0.16357299334158812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18584674073051544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wonthappenagain11,2020/02/04,"My girlfriend is incapable of abstract thought, I am concerned / confused. So I’m a little bit confused about how to deal with her and get the most out of my partner... at this point I am not even sure if she has an illness because she refuses to get help, go to counselling, or psychotherapy....

I need help figuring out if this is anything i should be aware of...

These symptoms are very obvious and clearly noticeable when you get to know my gf properly:

1. She can’t think long term, abstractly, outside of the current moment. (For example, if I say something with a double meaning, she wouldn’t understand. She can’t understand standup comedy because the a lot of jokes are saying one thing but meaning something else entirely)

2. She is social on the surface but is incapable of forming deep human connection, even with me.

3. She can’t process emotions, be vulnerable and literally shuts down if you try to have an adult conversation about issues in our relationship. (I bring up a concern and how it makes me feel and its impact on her relationship and her response will be staring at me blank faced completely....she will never say anything nor ever bring it up later, so its as if im talking to a wall. When pressured to say something she visibly seems to have difficulty saying anything comforting or meaningful)

4. She can’t talk about any deep topics in life, nor focus on anything someone is saying for longer periods. She admits she may have intense adhd. She has never watched a movie at all, says she can’t focus on it...

5. She has to constantly be doing something non stop everyday. She can’t sit still and just relax or think about things.

6. She has literally can not comprehend much of the world and how it functions outside of her world. 

7. She says she has dyslexia but im not sure what that means in the real world...

8. Emotionally it seems she is stuck as a child and never grew up. 

9. She was raped when she was 6 and her parents weren’t around that much during her younger years.

I am confused about what to do. Many of her behaviour seems like relationship red flags to me and i often get very anxious and want to leave her. But then on the other hand she seems like there is something mentally wrong with her and I need to understand it a bit.

She doesn’t address my needs, doesnt flirt, doesn’t really know much of anything and i have to literally spell out and guide her in the relationship mostly to no avail. Socially and emotionally she seems ‘held back’.
On the surface, she seems super social, but ive come to realize its all super ficial....

She is very physical, likes physical activities and focuses more on sex than emotional connection....she actually cannot see what my concerns are...

I am confused and not sure what to do or think. She seemed completely normal.",4.441580338266387,6.422637992424246,5.2673978153629335,79.16833509513745,71.5378787878788,8.623749119097956,30.839675828047923,9.22739947703685,2.8976437984496135,2212,98,401,49,43,719,246,528,0.096,0.815,0.09,-0.09300000000000001,3,0,5,0,0,0,83.0,1,2,0,2,22,19,1,5,19,0,51,7,2,4,11,105,89,45,0,12,19,1,2,3,3,5,3,8,1,4,21,27,0,3,24,3,0,5,22,7,0,1,6,14,61,12,63,74,14,59,0,0,4,2,70,33,0,25,23,285,82,0,0.0,0.0,0.05899850689873065,0.0,0.07265903825519694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04111366655107045,0.0,0.0,0.06830058608220267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487598411207688,0.05382063859647595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04648864355746477,0.0,0.07370954624192695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200944743844167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207940794400719,0.0633892991865684,0.06533386360357805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062329775794158514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05050508958770182,0.2720294649986174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986417551506356,0.054687926277021716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03056949538678923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634771004133968,0.0,0.034359802820510224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104774831596953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061051647950445,0.06310267989751146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645251924767047,0.0,0.0,0.06401653134172504,0.0,0.0,0.04270343264336681,0.08861050537105261,0.060595024911731875,0.0,0.053503627071340716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05139942132622205,0.0,0.0,0.04035633499705634,0.061295151378458125,0.0,0.19757019456583247,0.0,0.0,0.060927671392688426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13333125649826216,0.13448702446786534,0.13988733194556416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059236224507952136,0.0,0.06883209046321206,0.0,0.0,0.040968058280116994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713170468576042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715256493710885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881469662605329,0.038731087386230115,0.0,0.0,0.259638033375193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3846304603599251,0.0,0.0,0.048177378182585086,0.38527228499673744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848886416859213,0.05122605828447528,0.2327184786153876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048282016993327334,0.050545783670648464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709434861624449,0.06283924535115397,0.0,0.09718806310410376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033151719941739,0.11621756914152255,0.0,0.04799707780956178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041047166542512184,0.0,0.0,0.18881743480476626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496531032423173,0.0356598278273383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610157870937483,0.0,0.03893311503085384
mentalhealth,rubyso,2020/02/04,"i need to see my psychiatrist but i really dislike her my depression has gotten really bad lately and i havent taken my medicine in almost a year now. i want to see my psychiatrist because while i still have a lot of medicine i want to make sure it would still work / not be too strong for me now. 

this psychiatrist is really frustrating to be with though. she literally forces a parent to be there the entire session while she asks questions (including answering questions related to past/current abuse). even if you and your parent say they want you to be alone with her she doesnt allow it.
she also gets mad at me when i stim or dont look her in the eyes. shes really condescending and belittled me when i mentioned not doing well in school. 

is it even legal for her to have virtually no confidentiality with patients? even as a minor i have right of privacy too, right? its really frustrating. we've tried changing but i guess smth abt our insurance wont work out.",3.2341235888294686,5.656702860962567,4.804982174688057,79.11701574569223,76.54010695187165,8.647534165181224,24.82739156268569,9.2995712137729,2.3721291740938804,773,27,145,21,18,259,110,187,0.222,0.7390000000000001,0.039,-0.9917,3,2,0,0,1,0,16.0,1,3,1,3,15,8,3,0,6,0,17,1,1,2,1,27,30,14,0,6,6,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,7,5,1,0,2,5,31,3,21,22,1,17,0,1,4,0,21,7,0,7,10,107,36,5,0.0,0.1549295127899469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093750092487372,0.13542818256061587,0.0,0.10456892374732443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224318132037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091793459141731,0.07971023401428459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383270050723506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262361071278655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15325003777775598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590977333696794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831683308366053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440471561275317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14750325619627636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980567620736642,0.0,0.0,0.11116768752488966,0.0,0.0,0.08728348146428988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695706765067287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903875637880969,0.0,0.12482545333921265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929628091577444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41884181854154906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233370760786652,0.0,0.10398579820205303,0.0,0.13233635277291367,0.20839797746274413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088506072517739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12323998703870725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284712805698593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887776256277066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313773479242565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756916737314307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190390036991212,0.0,0.0,0.09288832907432323,0.0,0.0,0.08420531310364204
mentalhealth,Em_Read,2020/02/04,"URGENT: How long should I wait before becoming concerned about a possibly suicidal friend not answering me? Cross posted in: r/depression_help (so far)

Hey, so my town has had a lot of tragedies lately. Including a teacher and a student in my class. My friend, let’s call her Oak, was relatively close to the student and was even on her way to where he was at when he died. She was also close to the teacher (as was I) and the teacher was the first adult she had ever told about her family. Oak’s family, mostly her father, is pretty bad. She swears he doesn’t hurt her, but I don’t know if I believe that. I know he hurts Oak’s mother. He drinks a lot too. That added on to all of this as well as her behavior the last couple weeks is really worrying me. She has a history of this type of thing, and I helped her get through it last time, but she isn’t talking to me. 

And other friends of hers are noticing too. One of them R, has also expressed a worry that Oak will hurt herself. Now that the kid in our class died a few days ago, (and Oak was bad before that), I am getting really worried. I have texted her to attempt to check up on her, you know, make sure she knows someone cares, but she hasn’t responded. I have asked R if they have talked to Oak, but I haven’t gotten a response either. 

How long until I should be really worried. Oak lives like 25 minutes away from me, which doesn’t seem like a lot, but it could be depending on the situation. Plus, I have parents that track me and would not approve of me driving over there, or even calling Oak’s parents, (which I think would be counterintuitive anyway). 

So, if I do take the risk, I need to know, in your opinion, how long until I should start panicking and calling...she’s my best friend, I don’t want to push her away, but I’ll never forgive myself if she hurts herself and I didn’t even try to help her.  Please. Any advice at all would be very helpful",2.8790181243764543,4.369641250000001,3.980465580312608,88.81721150648491,74.64432989690721,7.068307283006319,24.37179913535085,7.717688229018142,1.081176155636847,1487,46,317,20,31,483,188,388,0.135,0.741,0.12300000000000001,-0.7896,2,0,1,0,0,0,61.0,1,2,2,4,23,18,0,1,18,0,42,1,0,5,5,60,61,35,3,13,14,4,0,2,4,7,0,0,0,2,14,12,1,1,9,1,1,3,11,7,1,2,12,0,56,11,42,36,9,42,0,4,0,0,55,19,0,12,20,226,70,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907313228510933,0.07172983108966863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12942182614823866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05502771014521381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564836279123198,0.0,0.1520521706980147,0.0,0.13512800762897842,0.0,0.08936870288877538,0.13771225639403034,0.09116802838717918,0.08491952182792861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16525473856431347,0.0,0.0825023364294311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460725504154333,0.08953535931412983,0.0,0.05218607526178196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16796233981969216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926983587612288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16033875362722824,0.07319588857093602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15256650564681826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688296792181303,0.0,0.0,0.2500713442829875,0.0,0.08455369891456857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16271494528638528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34650194885936936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.222354892809046,0.13191960694396315,0.09128018198725142,0.0,0.0,0.08274518295835456,0.0,0.07906589405126879,0.0,0.07145297939050152,0.21483236567155767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063833777649851,0.0,0.0,0.05401407587870183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06000042987747335,0.062409738667035315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212684346685086,0.0,0.0,0.05483282386041069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17970199677585974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882478720070963,0.0,0.09122403958490924,0.07749805549048193,0.08232373681670023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551639362918313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366563899639314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909563716867776,0.0,0.0,0.06856242518916235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05727490062767916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851227694822507,0.0,0.0762652210879375,0.0,0.060841034438539485,0.13007929028718865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0537590029641823,0.05184964226398291,0.0,0.0,0.047184532765035744,0.0,0.0,0.07732159372652271,0.0,0.054938704627035234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06676666810471714,0.04772813602196009,0.06422975360602076,0.0649083589054617,0.0,0.07275591922953792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32870878108811713,0.0,0.1724476557543948,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chocohandlepuffz,2020/02/04,"How Do You Tell If You're Bipolar? Hello. I (F16) have been experiencing a lot of mood swings and I just want to know if I could possibly be bipolar. 

Like I said, I've been having a lot of mood swings lately. In the beginning of December, I was extremely low and felt horrible everyday. (By then I haven't been to therapy for a week or two, and haven't been back since.) There wasn't really a real reason. To cope I c*t myself, and drank everyday. I reached out for help, and was told I felt bad because of that, my behavior. Which is probably true. However, I haven't been drinking regularly for over a week now and it's actually been great, except I still feel horrible. Sometimes I get very suddenly 'happy' and start getting so excited I feel the urge to cry, and then feel happy and sad at the same time in extreme. I don't know if this is 'normal' or sounds weird but it's been exhausting. 

A few days ago, I was having dinner with my family and my grandmother made a comment about something as little as me being on my phone and I completely lost it and went on this angry rant and shouted at her. I still feel really bad about it, I love her alot and would normally never do that but I completely lost control. 

In another instance, I was talking to a friend online and they said they were falling asleep. I was extremely happy, but then I just felt awful after they said it. He then eventually fell asleep which surprised me, and I just froze and started crying suddenly. I keep having these intense emotions over the smallest things. I'm sorry if this sounds stupid but I just really hate it and don't know what to do. 

I took some online tests and researched it, and found I have some symptoms but I'm still unsure, and wouldn't want to self diagnose but I'm just so exhausted and want to know what's going on. If it helps, my mother has been diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

I know it's much more than a few mood swings but I just feel horrible and put off by these sudden ups and downs.

I might just get a 'go see a therapist' but I'm just looking for honest opinions here, or some help. If you have a question I'll gladly answer. Thanks.",2.7857512634044106,4.782596810304455,4.267778257118206,84.47878559102675,76.21311475409836,7.867102181683718,24.819980278565268,8.6894789155246,1.8314580796252928,1686,58,335,36,38,560,202,427,0.163,0.715,0.121,-0.9714,1,0,2,0,0,0,49.0,0,2,3,3,20,27,2,0,17,1,38,14,2,4,2,94,83,50,0,14,26,1,9,1,1,3,8,6,0,1,21,27,3,2,17,1,0,7,8,11,0,1,29,18,45,13,41,48,11,48,0,4,2,1,25,16,0,18,26,237,66,2,0.0,0.0,0.0825157765339815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495498931097377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866575468017662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06501938311320578,0.14120371139284738,0.0515453760258709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731354643610853,0.0,0.09483825863220542,0.06751216387219028,0.0,0.1857645580123753,0.05453249581110383,0.0,0.0,0.1716478616586073,0.0,0.0,0.09691004936705662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828340121608515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511563819324127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971314463067915,0.0,0.2137736853597518,0.0,0.24356495050165905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271277036005796,0.06532879923514806,0.0,0.1325331769655655,0.0,0.09611178181696964,0.0,0.0,0.09322477742911103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27003861580306937,0.0,0.08348287764672514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003102892338115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515845829125699,0.0,0.0,0.2323525423182725,0.0,0.0953843744118843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04131045029275849,0.08474867920420348,0.0,0.0,0.07100687809885771,0.0,0.18460867338581835,0.14377527117459146,0.07631631015677917,0.08001020954502511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970198638280216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215938190373806,0.0,0.06521584149334582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16569650050991716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532570770232256,0.0,0.0,0.0911671253831713,0.0,0.0,0.08500349213956437,0.09472358440777638,0.0,0.0,0.09624477681775558,0.16250881181616988,0.08693903931075815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24130021126380416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738126066361247,0.0,0.08821175783418246,0.0,0.0,0.06994671411703954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509637950572822,0.08362938176065686,0.0946550310615255,0.11970025578250976,0.0,0.20258282798595767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788746359056449,0.0,0.0679639953485099,0.0739068513445193,0.07784904769305077,0.0966986995317056,0.09817760117633663,0.05617614640011704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049306071063032884,0.0,0.0,0.08079817201902936,0.09394632766302187,0.0,0.0,0.08260024476534812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976866971654158,0.14962234837357602,0.0,0.1356536122849584,0.0,0.0,0.07838551104825506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06006711571932901,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unconditionalmess,2020/02/04,"Fatherless Daughter syndrome / fear of abandonment It's taken me the better part of 22 years to realise how badly I've been affected by growing up with an absent father and my mum who used me as a crutch for her own issues.

 I've always felt different to my friends, and have never understood a real family dynamic. 

 I am an only child from a family with a drug addicted mother (who I have been told has attempted suicide several times in my lifetime and I believe to have a myriad of mental health problems). This is something I've always been used to and tried to ignore, as I believe you can't help where you come from but you can help where you go.. My form of rebellion growing up was to do as well as possible in school and avoid all forms of drugs.

As I get older I feel my self-esteem dropping and am realising how bad my relationships with men are... I have severe abandonment issues and I'm equally terrified of being with someone as I am of being alone. I have come to realise over time that this is most likely related to my lack of male role model in my childhood and subsequent familial issues. 

I find it incredibly hard to confide in people as I grew up being used to caring for my mother's emotional well-being, being her confidante for as long as I can remember and dealing with her extreme mood swings. She is not a bad parent, just someone that has been through a lot and made a few wrong turns; However, I have been left completely scarred by how I was bought up and scared to talk to people about how I feel in case I am burdening them with the pain that I have felt for most of my life. 

I am constantly so scared and I have no idea how to fix my issues, I'm terrified I'm going to end up alone because of the walls I have built around me to stop myself from feeling any more hurt. Men I am romantic with constantly tell me I am cold and that I close up very quickly - this hurts even more because I know that I'm really nothing like how I project myself to others. 

The only man I have ever felt a complete trust in my life is my best friend who has cared for me endlessly over the last two years. This is a relationship that confuses me as I've never felt love from a man without it having sexual connotations, and the more I think about it the more I worry I'm going to mess up this friendship by inevitably falling in love with the one person that truly cares about me. 

TLDR: Is there anyone else here feeling lost? 

How do I fix my relationship and attitude toward men  / increase my self-esteem and stop being so scared to open up to people?",7.098664759897638,6.040582299412923,7.754452054794522,74.47264752370917,64.55772994129158,10.992653921421043,33.54817100707511,10.214889679676881,3.2385986150835464,2029,71,389,40,26,679,234,511,0.221,0.68,0.099,-0.9972,3,3,3,0,0,1,36.0,0,4,1,4,22,35,0,6,21,0,45,9,0,12,4,76,81,36,1,2,4,6,9,2,2,0,7,0,0,8,20,29,0,6,14,0,1,10,6,20,1,2,17,10,62,14,83,59,17,53,0,5,0,2,40,25,0,4,19,288,82,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747788388469402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14208777698313502,0.0,0.0,0.114153320178135,0.0,0.0,0.046647054429110026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04796332400354377,0.07028383767792735,0.0,0.06106422677969369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17182225582707805,0.08362993388636719,0.0,0.0,0.15456648917968058,0.07198637825102963,0.06066683611091748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20981198206121351,0.0,0.0,0.11817729630035526,0.14384142001570074,0.148253977192448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707185879520793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166733232564852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909719364857988,0.0,0.05730244613474556,0.07716031142801225,0.060754943042843484,0.0,0.0,0.045306449834138784,0.06204824058906438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19399620866066292,0.0771886146697916,0.13873507617294792,0.0,0.2634484057602189,0.0,0.06269472466448024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599288592189253,0.0,0.035838134869160265,0.0,0.11695261406697123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06144778120446179,0.0,0.0,0.07291343711065054,0.0,0.0,0.09195576663919326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468650542207011,0.07743557525362409,0.0,0.2863820613173003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037698100684440884,0.05591420276386952,0.0,0.0,0.07452883150314192,0.0,0.09690156650711568,0.06702425111935302,0.0,0.0,0.060704549448330675,0.0,0.0,0.07487970959003734,0.05831714379574383,0.12381960255095648,0.06490638977128096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691277777466838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580961733007678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581889673030199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04648184909691088,0.1043394056316972,0.0729900762324769,0.0,0.0761667967148037,0.07428186322180709,0.0,0.1426657208407411,0.05989463940004821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733072534784857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563629485572861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807629842623766,0.0439438097587298,0.0,0.0,0.2209365611981226,0.0777049334598048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060271359006012,0.06942195421969534,0.0,0.0,0.1431194036099433,0.1549859900020846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162408964919946,0.052807897953577286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146972342696772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503196098025228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05513418346969192,0.05995518481220826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043953002558807394,0.0,0.0,0.07999676753019269,0.0,0.0,0.06554560568827067,0.0,0.04657160434696031,0.0746118259286214,0.06700749457387528,0.0,0.0,0.17773255741891975,0.0,0.05659818285936715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335055612469012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612327706155269,0.0,0.0,0.06966170481326793,0.0,0.0,0.07499802860141712,0.0,0.08834605562036672
mentalhealth,brown_eyezzz,2020/02/04,"Lost Years to Depression Hi all. I'm 19, and I know this is still young, but I feel such immense guilt for time I feel like I've wasted.  I was diagnosed with major depression and general anxiety when I was 12, and I've always been in a troubled family situation. I used to be so passionate, and I feel like I have so much wasted potential. I dropped all of my hobbies for quick pleasure (spending money, smoking weed, video games, SLEEP), I went from nearly straight A's in advanced classes to barely passing, I've had next to no social life and zero memories and accomplishments. I'm in a slightly more stable place in my life and I am looking to start seeking treatment and start ""becoming myself"" again by taking up hobbies, trying to be social, etc... but I feel so overwhelmed with guilt, shame and hopelessness over my past, that it's difficult to have the positive outlook I need. I don't feel able to move forward and I was wondering if anyone else had anything that helped them in a similar situation.",6.195,6.8493701666666675,6.875,74.27000000000002,66.08333333333334,10.15,35.27083333333333,10.125756701596842,3.7122833333333327,800,37,141,18,12,264,119,192,0.203,0.652,0.145,-0.9145,0,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,1,3,8,14,0,4,5,0,13,5,1,1,2,27,30,17,0,2,3,0,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,12,0,0,7,2,2,5,2,10,0,1,8,6,20,4,23,20,6,27,0,5,1,1,6,11,0,2,14,93,24,2,0.1423608857423613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845566123042567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089056879340269,0.0,0.0,0.09954204136652292,0.14586555087419115,0.11715087903237903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572264135756862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452304445728929,0.14449330235539373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892425268787365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15877001900337254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420517328352494,0.0,0.35990970648674553,0.20340529043878575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954215008744244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823781974520164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20110740742279465,0.13910067569524415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954728951831768,0.0,0.15540372366548252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513070918813404,0.10465163127408912,0.10555879292972754,0.0,0.0,0.1514024170360375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589957391107088,0.0,0.0,0.14873682563078747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200392005234147,0.14246369707149062,0.2902379901705106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20152753531180206,0.0,0.11368958724890264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703766904742483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301177731228772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665369660509653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295409704760288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196996733585145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15438430787878066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167574293309952
mentalhealth,ksmnocreativity,2020/02/04,"I don't know what's happening anymore? I'm a college student on the east coast and I don't even really know what happened. I was having a normal Monday. I just got back from my home state yesterday for some private matters and was looking forward to the week. But as today progressed, I just started feeling more and more shitty about myself?

I still don't really understand but I just started feeling like I forgot something and that something was just kind of broken? In me? And I don't understand it and it's making me freak out. I'm breathing heavily and I don't feel like myself. 

I've been struggling with some form of mental illness for years, but I'm not diagnosed so I can't say with certainty what it is, but every time it happens, it hits me like a sledgehammer. I'm just really scared I may do something stupid tonight because I feel weird and off and numb and I don't know what to do and I feel like reality itself is like closing in on me.",2.266381578947368,4.545698291666671,3.8385526315789487,85.54065789473687,79.10416666666666,6.542105263157895,26.771929824561404,7.669130373188453,1.7161104166666674,760,32,145,12,19,252,99,192,0.179,0.718,0.10300000000000001,-0.9588,0,0,3,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,10,12,1,2,5,0,17,4,1,1,0,42,41,17,0,1,10,0,5,5,0,1,3,1,1,0,11,15,0,1,10,0,0,1,8,6,0,0,6,7,22,6,17,33,5,21,0,0,1,0,1,9,0,3,17,102,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054084381121536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121476643596264,0.0,0.0802399676144076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360091556666706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869398766320846,0.0,0.11090331824794672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327785130807808,0.282107882414709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527593388725888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3491979268906679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203486776189002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370716057482984,0.21701997627937705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.321537007700152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053541633284196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786354490832722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265132207772987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12896871513812755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529751997665248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046768609234768,0.13178383978170494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040038769374697,0.0,0.0,0.1863357179236449,0.0,0.10511928718669003,0.0,0.0,0.13760746939258184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675407282518884,0.0,0.12476913574566433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740613778671732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558504269189256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476491983684876
mentalhealth,simplyscattered,2020/02/04,"Let the worst get the best of me again I have trouble coping with stress and anxiety, not just on a basic level but on an advanced level, that the stimulus will be the same, in most cases minor,  but my reaction will be disproportionately negative. It came to a head today when I snapped and got fired from my job over something minor. I haven't been able to hold a job for more than a year at a time before getting fired let go because it is only matter of time before my mental state decomposes and I turn into a confused, stressed, angry, person who feels helpless and either gives up or lashes out. I try but deep down inside there are too many problems I can't even really explain that place my life in cycle of failure, the worst in me will always over the best in me.",6.9417156862745095,6.133122281045754,7.447834967320262,75.72900735294121,64.75163398692811,9.480065359477123,30.889705882352942,8.472884824447931,2.2760333333333334,611,18,115,7,8,202,104,153,0.276,0.659,0.066,-0.991,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,3,6,10,0,3,13,0,13,2,1,0,0,23,22,9,0,1,7,0,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,5,8,0,1,2,0,0,3,4,8,0,0,3,3,13,2,22,12,8,27,0,1,0,0,4,17,0,3,6,90,18,2,0.157018956102711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306523500037708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011907163879153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571729824295308,0.0,0.2672231333016577,0.0,0.3295634142600728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17958785545430586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10370953962479644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939350209727704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16407184769049676,0.1506268904160291,0.08923749125643403,0.0,0.12558240314995872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611467489313138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3116341710191013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.321125041949555,0.11090713229755306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15919257638847334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158238176498918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941999166125905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710289596541436,0.16405138934611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15024593511707454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005903639795558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088086365999055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3597293674079601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18311803203297386,0.0,0.14883561064073614,0.0,0.0,0.10660556419876534,0.17079153511145695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111505966145026
mentalhealth,rimvo,2020/02/04,"Bad mental state Hey Reddit, 
I have recently over the past year developed this horible mental state where I'll subconsciously start telling myself to kill myself or self harm. Ive also been waking up to large scratches on my wrist. They are definitely made by me in my sleep no question about it. I have no real connections left in terms of friends and I don't want to worry my family as they have caught me self harming before and I don't want to worry them as I remember how sad it made them feel. I don't trust anyone irl to tell them so here I am making some dumb post on the internet at 2am to give me hope. I can't go to a therapist I'm only 17 and don't make that kind of money. I've tried seeing my school counceler but he was off no help. I don't want to slave away for the rest of my life working some shitty 9-5 job.  I'm not talented enough to do any of the stuff I enjoy professionaly. So I know the rest of my life will be a misery with some office job I don't even want that I only do because it pays well. I don't really have anyone so I thought I'd vent to Reddit. 
Thanks 
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mentalhealth,Arsene37,2020/02/04,"I'm scared of myself. I'm sorry ahead of time if this paragraph is too large or just a jumble of thoughts. I've been doing anything to stop thinking, so if this post keeps bouncing from one thing to another I apologize. I'm 19, 20 in November. Last year in May, I graduated. And with graduation as many know, people go their separate ways. They tend to, anyway. Back then I was worried, as well. I've never been good at dealing with stuff alone. When I do, my mind races to think of all the worst outcomes first. School allowed me to talk to people that cared about me, though. They were there for me when I needed them, and I was there for them in return. I still remember teachers pulling the old PDA card out whenever one of my friends would hold onto me if I was going through stuff. That got me through so much. I wasn't left to my own thoughts. Since graduation, I've only seen my closest friend in person once. I know they have their own lives, and I'm proud of them. But, whenever problems occur in my life now, I don't know what to do. I know it's pathetic. Even if I have people texting me to let me vent, that thought of me talking to someone through a screen constantly pops up in my mind. And even if they're talking to me through the phone, I feel alone. I've made it through the year though, till recently. Last week, I found out that my closest friend took her own life. Since then, I've constantly been on the verge of a breakdown. And no matter who I contact, no one is available to meet so I can talk. I've had to deal with this alone and my brain keeps telling me that it would be so much easier to not have to deal with all of this. To be free of stress. Of life. Those thoughts have always been in the back of my head, hell, I'm sure everyone's had them at some point. But they're getting louder now. And I want to listen to them so bad. I don't know what to do.",2.1962621055920017,3.838273118556703,3.0763823805060935,93.94796782255548,76.83505154639175,6.352514839112778,23.870977819431427,7.106945922332613,0.6618718213058421,1462,47,332,16,33,463,185,388,0.111,0.813,0.076,-0.9302,1,3,0,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,10,3,23,15,1,2,9,0,30,5,2,2,4,57,62,29,0,10,10,0,1,0,3,3,3,1,0,1,19,13,0,4,14,0,1,4,7,6,1,4,20,4,50,10,62,36,9,50,1,0,2,0,29,19,1,8,25,226,69,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585403542912455,0.0,0.0,0.06923710697010448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725258881437888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684744642759481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12796619213820268,0.06947659450745565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288950509806757,0.0,0.0,0.08483779898188977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17984017392746945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573565323113943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991839777263984,0.0,0.0,0.07951040066775619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04207330673563647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07077809844198082,0.0,0.09123510265318542,0.1928627420348077,0.0,0.04347361554921037,0.0,0.09457994024121516,0.06979231904822532,0.06655037035465132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539712215907275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479211468027089,0.0,0.0,0.2286492784953918,0.1356539654516913,0.0,0.0,0.09040754436380047,0.08508751997036,0.17632034132745994,0.0,0.0,0.07347565856360419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873499683802004,0.0,0.08436153991824216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16803608224595235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223373558318197,0.06169891216506436,0.06417642327105579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731454592268204,0.08861557743093605,0.16915506722374782,0.06328469971478462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306131366837715,0.07265546982962443,0.0,0.0,0.0786600290551908,0.0,0.07969185768226834,0.0,0.0,0.07962041158252442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215950558340042,0.0,0.09426032955792828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330739059149707,0.08421262321379938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13766378931268355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050327902997452,0.0,0.0,0.09314640736115022,0.0,0.0,0.06645134586203692,0.06956700572451552,0.09531638998760493,0.0,0.19051031710674185,0.0,0.0,0.07842412440649033,0.0,0.0,0.2675231068281516,0.07272891472236574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055280803966603065,0.10663478679630436,0.16350614653841747,0.2642367172300261,0.04852022474779868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244899936587588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049079216236194836,0.06604795889319852,0.06674577403969756,0.0,0.07481548180902482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450345378215125,0.0,0.11821951706223018,0.0,0.0,0.10716859209752096
mentalhealth,MysteryF,2020/02/04,I feel like I'm going to cry in normal social situations and feel guilty even though I haven't done anything Any ideas how to fix?,10.386666666666667,5.96945803703704,9.799259259259262,72.89666666666669,61.22222222222222,12.281481481481485,34.407407407407405,8.841846274778883,2.652362962962963,105,2,22,1,1,34,23,27,0.20800000000000002,0.7040000000000001,0.08800000000000001,-0.5267,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,6,6,3,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,1,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,11,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20117378495996924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24344196459414386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32495413710759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30273565707692485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19539218730486008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991599439878509,0.2113402132457515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16812637168455846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33395480068303424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452704942258193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898494950870042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3325240594269277,0.0,0.3015602917816625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29065037570882984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Daft_-,2020/02/04,"Teenager with a small problem Hi guys so here’s the deal: the past few months I’ve just been feeling this wave of something I don’t really know how to explain. It’s like I’m sad but I tell myself there isn’t any reason to be sad and I’m just acting this way and Im not sad at all. And also I recently got a girlfriend that I think really likes me and I like her but I always think of these scenarios in my head where she’s cheating on me and It hurts a little when I think this way. And also I just feel like nobody likes me or something like I’m doing everything wrong. My creativity hasn’t been that great and I just have a funny but not good feeling constantly in my gut. I’m not hoping to the answer of all my problems guys, just advice I guess",1.181851851851853,2.9464959506172868,3.189901234567902,91.42855555555558,80.23456790123456,6.048395061728398,20.059259259259264,7.0316486544052195,0.3033525925925926,592,15,132,7,15,200,91,162,0.18899999999999997,0.619,0.192,-0.0971,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,13,17,1,0,7,0,8,2,2,2,2,37,23,16,0,3,12,0,3,6,1,0,0,0,0,2,8,8,0,0,10,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,3,3,20,9,11,19,3,15,0,4,0,0,9,7,0,3,11,84,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13565161788390034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22202585883654904,0.11550793055924545,0.0,0.0,0.09440119157958624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500132460094427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14311555255107294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247609201963398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21057208217478465,0.09917180791251064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643418818281905,0.1110256608632753,0.15304764522734468,0.1529239873858604,0.2749038469726252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246760570987926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787787580717767,0.0,0.0,0.14860784126149204,0.0,0.14994756516272542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076290897002011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4069176016255305,0.13913238675408934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080342774630114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325177571362801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26566069481048105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17786109131821076,0.14272831334949496,0.13706630564167022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137381900161279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133329653747132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668474483007897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203749805060338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517759985649911,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chillchase,2020/02/04,"Is my girlfriend having a psychosis episode? So about 2 weeks ago my girlfriend K, moved out of her house and didn’t tell anyone. She lived with her family and they did not see this coming. She didn’t tell me, and just texted me she needed some distance. I later found out she actually moved out. I tried texting her but no reply. 


Fast forward to today, they find out she was living with a teacher at a trade school she attended. This is a trade school that offers medical certifications, like the PCT she had just completed. And for whatever reason, she decided to move in with her old teacher. Her progress had just ended in the middle of January I believe. 


Her best friend picked her up and helped move her out of the apartment she was staying at. I don’t know how they found out of how they got her to come along, they are hesitant to share all the information. But she is currently under the care of her best friend.


Her friend is saying she is acting crazy, laughing a lot then crying a lot and then being completely calm. She said she doesn’t want to talk to anybody and doesn’t care about anybody. She said she was going to meet me tomorrow but I never agreed to that and they think she is going to try and go back to the teachers apartment. 


The cops couldn’t do anything since she is an adult and she decided to move in. I’m going to assume they didn’t find drugs when they went because apparently the cops went to the apartment with the best friend. 


This is NOT normal behavior for her. She is usually a very calm, catholic girl. Very sweet and just calm. 


Could this teacher have some sort of psychological ‘hold’ over my girlfriend K?? What could cause someone to ditch all their personal feelings and emotions and want to ‘hide away’ with them? 


My first theory was maybe she has a relationship with the teacher. The teacher is a female, and is older like probably in 40s If I had to guess. K is a virgin, and I don’t think she had experienced any sexual encounter before so that’s what made me think something like that is happening. 


Any insight on mental breakdowns and episodes of psychosis would be much appreciated because I am trying to help but her family is hesistant to let me.",4.628773696682465,6.255279374407586,4.9881960900473965,82.78807612559244,70.4218009478673,8.023815165876778,27.642476303317537,8.567472430010655,1.9618931279620848,1744,61,332,29,32,552,197,422,0.031,0.7759999999999999,0.192,0.9977,2,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,10,5,12,18,0,0,23,0,43,3,0,6,3,80,71,28,0,9,11,0,1,3,7,1,2,3,0,3,10,31,0,1,15,0,2,16,12,0,0,1,20,7,61,18,53,44,10,55,0,0,1,1,67,22,0,8,21,238,71,5,0.0,0.0,0.07799355518726303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708471317964105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870109057524754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055884189158421714,0.0,0.06577001831632755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07509051683048037,0.06145603977917174,0.0,0.09744093308184266,0.0,0.06800879237072532,0.09004612480811595,0.2516235350189451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16297414377627267,0.08210318546901556,0.0,0.13769359229964853,0.16759599739958567,0.0,0.0,0.1276244107478958,0.0,0.08779192849993428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268558684313012,0.0,0.0,0.08990288994664276,0.07078826999280836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068903926130622,0.0,0.040411592611806005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460967906280271,0.06798266887002175,0.0,0.17526341932111292,0.2469939942389485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18168888118506585,0.0,0.06392191780493044,0.0,0.08804446175843116,0.0,0.0706758590057933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714172889044712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922206906408712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04392372366449968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172692997478698,0.0,0.1171393769793376,0.0,0.1411473740066896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589576463964154,0.0,0.07562530410320424,0.0,0.0,0.08029363906620203,0.0,0.0,0.08051425802700403,0.08054382985240105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4247287893450442,0.05875277900243533,0.059262071286027326,0.06164173139060732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783078079107366,0.0,0.0,0.08386599800874611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978589218629733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08617077271166791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217440403798221,0.0,0.08580765153734864,0.0,0.0,0.152050610880465,0.06355816997258118,0.0,0.1617731757321116,0.06368847622721678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611333173854822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771870363929726,0.06152881643645674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518754191347734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423927453167635,0.1397128726451913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363475906479107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575788829636593,0.0,0.0,0.1627879051842452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802415966185928,0.13189008988209913,0.09428159781716937,0.0,0.06410960388733301,0.0,0.0,0.148179292218288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056775178051749864,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helicopterologist,2020/02/04,"Not sure how to start This feels really silly to say but I feel like I need to speak to a mental health professional and I’m not really sure what to say or where to start.  I know something has changed in my mental state but I have a very difficult time describing it. It’s like, I know something is wrong but I can’t quite nail down what the feeling is. I told a friend a while back that I need to make an appointment with a therapist but I haven’t taken any steps toward that so far. Then, I ran into her at a super bowl party yesterday and she asked me wether or not I had made that appointment yet. It really meant a lot that she remembered me saying that and cared enough to ask me about it. I really want to take the next step and talk to someone but I’m scared that I wont make any sense and they won’t be able to help me. Also, I’m active duty military and don’t want to speak to another military member. Maybe it’s just the stigma that comes with seeking help that I don’t want to be associated with.  Either way, I don’t know how to get help outside the military medicine system. Anyone got any stories of starting out with a psych and how they were helped or ideas about how to get started? I know that mental health is my responsibility and want to get help, I just don’t know what to say or where to start...",4.004125252525252,4.477720178181824,5.129060606060605,85.50114646464647,70.85454545454544,8.72929292929293,24.368686868686872,8.841846274778883,1.3901717171717172,1039,25,230,18,18,344,133,275,0.055,0.762,0.183,0.9873,0,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,2,14,11,0,1,13,0,17,2,0,7,2,58,55,25,0,6,15,0,3,2,1,2,2,6,0,0,18,15,0,1,11,0,0,4,11,3,0,0,8,9,28,8,32,43,3,28,0,0,0,0,21,9,0,5,14,145,46,3,0.09304247812900372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744060361444428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18981622707074236,0.09756315084137483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505746405316988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396431447861874,0.0,0.0,0.07154392251177756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486300740862748,0.0,0.09842660486815223,0.08014785636409512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096137751729412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411352176670732,0.06646956496612644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188438780062212,0.0,0.14583256390721258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441456935189768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19779960677740896,0.0,0.0,0.3118220591930296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503363263828344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556685635434259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091171011345607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910138767477469,0.0,0.08803904247866877,0.12421315327558635,0.0,0.09347367503963194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2812948023888909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797963719139333,0.0,0.0,0.09895173103409606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896212831520614,0.0,0.0,0.2384215759130181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539899017302673,0.0,0.0,0.29596445223923074,0.093151751998677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883458978445107,0.14325729061582476,0.0,0.0,0.3292797245335781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17538286904817332,0.0,0.06995636427373758,0.07478401953366152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080294883561486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054253817224810895,0.0,0.0,0.08890607510006716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676978865301243,0.219515456991884,0.07385278836792672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172734378115247,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anonymous_teen9305,2020/02/04,"help me for anyone who's been to a mental hospital i need advice....is it actually beneficial and is it as bad as people make it out to be? 

i don't know if i should tell my therapist about cutting because it has gotten worse recently. i'm scared that if i do tell her i'll have to go to a mental hospital 

btw i live in cali and i'm 14",1.1479999999999997,2.215697066666668,4.546333333333333,84.73150000000003,78.33333333333334,8.200000000000001,23.166666666666664,8.841846274778883,1.4868666666666672,260,8,61,6,6,97,52,75,0.152,0.7709999999999999,0.077,-0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,1,2,0,8,0,0,1,0,9,15,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,0,8,0,10,11,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,1,38,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.23446925932337456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16800265622463048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006157550390259,0.14646661094383112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655121021368696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16104819016938124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204633292600165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21216317270912446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038236343857984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48427211923388397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815746348581676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657324842397794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372380420067679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24055259447195204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42001385484231213,0.0,0.0,0.2789724631686816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448560731894837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GenericOwOUsername,2020/02/04,A question about compulsive thoughts. I've recently been experiencing anxiety and depression that seems to be double what it usually is. I'm normally able to cope without meds but I have scheduled a doctor's visit tomorrow and I'm scared. I've started having these horrible thoughts that terrify me and I'm afraid one day O might act on those thoughts. Any body else experience something like this? I'm terrified of the night now because that's when the thoughts are the worst. I don't know if I'm crazy or it's normal. I've read that it happens to a lot of people but what if I'm in the margin that act on those thoughts? What do I say to my doctor? And I'm so scared the doc will give me meds that amplify all of these thoughts and make my depression and anxiety worse. Can someone help? Any tips appreciated.,2.1455141476880613,4.739392664596274,3.5828053830227766,85.30669944789511,81.98136645962731,7.5529330572808835,27.57798481711525,8.515128840125781,2.3402005521049003,653,30,129,16,18,214,94,161,0.257,0.682,0.061,-0.9897,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,3,8,0,11,3,1,1,1,27,30,13,0,4,6,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,17,6,0,0,9,1,0,3,2,6,0,1,7,2,7,1,12,20,4,15,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,7,10,74,24,3,0.12127780366580272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16494613057167945,0.0,0.18555437570478572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392982345479701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347122997489572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821415030207353,0.0,0.20891278917449865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24826594206501254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131204293491226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863296337113448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11634072022944855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107245561255572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812899553708039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665110920615464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05925020889262592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031060517413649,0.0,0.0,0.0809538756845025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694245994979144,0.0,0.0,0.12865658431702404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381100315662547,0.2376529957532478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218097845817658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407875876229119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585889583495672,0.0,0.12131062316185272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974720005672915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644497720965478,0.2428404771067562,0.0,0.0,0.11040675758159016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275828948468628,0.09336557835933723,0.0,0.0,0.08584105364808492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5776861754911208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13357036673883746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690747492531756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359244298808438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ball_fondlers_,2020/02/04,Sister is in hospital for breakdown. Psychosis/bipolar. Her roommates are bullying her to move out. I want to take legal action to get them kicked out of HER apartment My sister is being bullied/harassed by her roommates for having mental health issues. they want her to leave the apartment but she’s been living there the longest and had them move in after her. They make her pay more for the room and scream at her for not doing dishes. I want to take action. Does anyone know any good articles or anything I can do for her ? She got so drunk the other night because her friends/roommates are being so evil to her and two guys followed her home and raped her.  I’m extremely distraught and just want to help her.,3.9424754901960775,6.188812610294117,4.013823529411763,86.47137254901962,73.63235294117645,5.7098039215686285,26.03921568627451,6.42735559955562,1.0679480392156862,569,20,101,4,12,175,84,136,0.204,0.7090000000000001,0.087,-0.9769,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,4,0,4,5,2,1,4,0,12,4,0,1,0,17,24,9,0,4,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,1,7,2,0,1,1,1,5,1,4,0,1,3,1,24,1,20,19,1,15,0,0,0,1,24,8,0,1,2,75,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115881808097807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348598097892765,0.0,0.15871630766321146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757230353521735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878261435864275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007670788475856,0.0,0.0,0.16177095067070196,0.15425646871427465,0.0,0.0,0.19097250284412998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050127355455637,0.0,0.0,0.12927729109300726,0.0,0.1934652270092124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013070982812748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599679637184993,0.0,0.0,0.2042224226826088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703085282031819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287428158157329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943684920041064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4099824627014059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809962635303725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29002981031646624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840683293804086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4550409888638928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Neonguy123,2020/02/04,"????? Over the past few days I've started hearing what seemed like noises or murmurs but now I can hear the odd word or sentence, and get so engrossed in listening to these noises I wont notice time going I think my mum can read my thoughts and I'm pretty sure she knows I know about it, but she wont say anything.",1.739743589743593,3.630577769230772,2.7950000000000017,94.31916666666667,79.0,4.94871794871795,23.14102564102564,5.46131890053228,0.1640256410256411,245,8,53,1,6,78,50,65,0.043,0.753,0.204,0.8789,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,13,16,7,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,2,0,4,0,0,3,2,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,4,8,2,4,13,1,8,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,3,6,30,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20142291975862164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785488462911487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788099430902078,0.0,0.13910709572848085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5517418596997875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690357975764176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958110972086425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786695909541693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336584172241241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490166948223209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24483388682920496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19464905891950934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228272750264032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732478019351554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230690612690448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683722634025926,0.0,0.1943181726746274,0.14272598463364644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Derpy_Logic,2020/02/04,"What do I do???? I feel like ive posted here before, but I think it's just some type of false deja vu.

I can't seem to get stuff off my chest when I need to, yet I get emotional when i'm alone in my own world. I face alot on the daily, from chronic asthma pains and clinical anxiety to taking AP classes in 8th grade, yes, 8th. I want to talk to a friend about my issues, but none of em are willing to listen, and the ones that are willing to help are out of my state, and can't really do much either. 

If I were to actually explain it to somebody, they'll hit me with ""MAN UP"", or something simular, and I can't stand it. I mess up on almost everything, and im a socially awkward person. People get mad at me over Catch 22s that I cant even tell them about, and its like I have to take responsibility over things that have NOTHING to do with me, which is why I hide my pains and issues from people. I'm literally screaming my lungs out and killing my brain cells because of my rage.

I usually play Dauntless and watch YouTube/Posts on Instagram/Reddit as a coping mechanism, because I can't really do anything else. I don't really have a life outside of a 24/7 online Coordinate Algebra course that's skuffed and being the oldest out of 4 children who consistently mess up and do things that trigger really bad thoughts, and actions that I don't intend on doing/thinking.

I decided to make QuickNotes on my phone to help me actually list the things going wrong and stuff, and i'm afraid to tell anybody because then I feel like i'm overexaggerating and being a faker about myself... I can conclude that nobody understands me and if I were to actually explain myself in a way where people could understand, they would literally shit on me.

Of course, i'm an intelligent person, but i'm also very slow in the head thanks to stress and anxiety. I can't do much in conversations without screwing the whole thing up and making the chat go dead, or screwing up IRL and having everyone doubt me. I'm very sensitive, and I remember things that hurt and zone out alot because of memories like those of which hurts.

Everyone always thinks im a cool chill person, when on the inside I feel as if my reactor core is overheating and is about to cause a major radiation overload... I have to hold in anger and intrusive thoughts of suicide/homocide, or urges to try and harm myself everyday, and I just want it to stop... I suffer PTSD from past events and my abusive father who is now on a restraining order for his craziness... 

Everyone keeps saying I need a therapist, but it's not that easy, if literally everyone who I can ask for help just doubts me and wont listen. I just want someone to give advice, or at least suggest some things to help. I'm not even trying to be a karma whore, or whatever, its not even funny. Really. I honestly don't even think anyone would understand...",7.883159926711162,6.29680422084806,8.450926580290536,71.81094948305198,63.32862190812721,11.848082711686953,35.627273917026564,10.825029732296443,3.688205287266064,2263,83,436,49,27,761,266,566,0.175,0.7090000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.9935,0,1,1,0,1,1,74.0,0,0,3,1,20,33,7,5,23,2,43,15,6,6,0,96,86,47,2,12,22,1,3,4,1,6,6,4,0,5,31,33,0,4,17,2,0,4,15,24,0,1,4,9,59,9,75,71,12,52,1,3,1,3,34,30,3,17,17,299,90,3,0.0,0.08322945970394773,0.20564849613704755,0.0,0.0,0.06864311338911096,0.0,0.0,0.07034074567663352,0.07275317826946043,0.0,0.05617532043176901,0.05844990349842975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074752676917897,0.0,0.0,0.049117303904893835,0.0,0.057806081221215465,0.0,0.06567008280456105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05865207866229522,0.17128407855716507,0.0,0.059773767381830975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784172367476774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216150351237183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608533525123829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058681121873166125,0.07901676008789367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855860252880557,0.0,0.0,0.26849043523199195,0.06313214781482959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10655474323701694,0.100366833241427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054271517849739576,0.0,0.11010116156397284,0.06738590778375862,0.07984430057675959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209217380207195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188336376998852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15039857330642695,0.0,0.1517544409488044,0.14663615409132702,0.0,0.0624374496159162,0.0777162649364911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049616491244837635,0.1372736598065618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377886591822766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327708587983676,0.1041723324333366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740247513179459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047600185257921285,0.0,0.14949238114051694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705730142460722,0.14609820551277236,0.1840070470596764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455158931324002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211325885946638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250054081425734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957448552508144,0.0,0.0,0.05586206040016799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394888711728662,0.0,0.0,0.07210602127466906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160646583215896,0.0595188048137861,0.05407843651897093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058728403730507674,0.08046601079100225,0.0,0.16082863853846996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563178427325147,0.056460691607382076,0.122795368931383,0.0646726410239225,0.0,0.081560467926364,0.2800080302510669,0.1800419824158986,0.0,0.11153419964171556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538419997242537,0.0,0.0,0.2193842045229262,0.0,0.0,0.07736552084218418,0.11591982856579715,0.12429789075485803,0.05575762755717989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338565972005257,0.07842661930784052,0.0,0.06771417874165299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980081009020092,0.07680245353327791,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drumminnoodles,2020/02/04,"Any advice for how to get a psychotic person to take meds? My mom is 68 years old and she’s had schizophrenia for pretty much her whole life.  She won’t take her meds.  She thinks she’s allergic to them.

This morning she texted me and asked me to come over and fix her house because it’s saying mean things to her.   I drove right over, and as far as I can tell she’s having a lot of auditory hallucinations.  She was watching music videos and kept asking me why they sounded so weird and why the people in the videos kept threatening her and telling her to get out of the house.  Also she said that when she opened her kitchen cabinets she could hear people having sex inside of them, and also that someone was using her computer to make child porn, somehow.  She didn’t want to go in her bedroom because the walls there were telling her “this is my house, you have to get out” or something like that.

I called the clinic where she sees a psychiatrist.  I spoke to a social worker there, who told me my mom missed her appointment last week.  She tried to talk to my mom on the phone but my mom wouldn’t talk to her.  I offered to bring my mom to the doctor to get her some medicine and she said no thanks.  She doesn’t think she’s psychotic, she thinks it’s a problem with her house or someone hacked her Netflix or something.  She said she was allergic to antipsychotic drugs.  I felt like there was nothing I could really do because she didn’t want to go to the doctor, didn’t want to take meds, and I can’t force her to.

Do any of you have any suggestions that could help?  I feel like the only option is waiting until it gets so bad that she’s completely incoherent and then having her involuntarily committed, but I know that’s not good for her.  I’d like to get her treatment ASAP but I can’t get her to agree to it.",4.010920554854984,5.0705556994535534,4.537158469945356,87.60593947036574,71.24043715846993,7.597982345523329,25.005884825556954,7.882392219407189,1.1227872215216481,1430,40,305,18,26,454,167,366,0.078,0.8370000000000001,0.084,-0.1221,1,0,3,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,3,1,11,10,0,0,14,0,28,10,0,3,1,49,69,27,0,8,7,5,2,4,0,2,7,7,2,2,14,16,1,3,7,3,0,5,10,4,0,0,18,11,67,6,42,46,4,24,0,1,2,2,74,12,0,7,11,200,81,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335930242376122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006979627936157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315421231858814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036401400806653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06268182435110953,0.13728923302206608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665671001616567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466771571585178,0.0787113629177841,0.0,0.0,0.17981619133054794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536783541419133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705946414535848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03795856203617627,0.0536313149968591,0.07208070899759192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27455345028887257,0.0,0.08533007760911616,0.06296667121713916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461138423929752,0.0,0.050319050795873385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3464911507286513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04125750265758367,0.0611935436333305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05302543848504024,0.14670517445037046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382336699866224,0.0,0.0,0.05011101512001012,0.0,0.0,0.08177520751800946,0.2501635665677079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4396159740076997,0.0,0.0,0.0551864171250248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203342495953481,0.0,0.0787752345897599,0.0,0.0,0.05709549323418778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409067919191492,0.06554980753294032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637501805310061,0.0,0.07183358207120064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048092922852567735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411091427886992,0.21423144348158474,0.059700115285860784,0.0,0.0,0.05982251179959885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652625475626182,0.12721619946008975,0.11558789172953456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693339715843705,0.12067975201537705,0.19684820867486288,0.06911603505691051,0.0,0.0,0.04987437379146277,0.14430895087193754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173433015931444,0.0,0.05096883013275205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483793902006571,0.0,0.0,0.1328378931012727,0.0,0.060218076521960276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548126100791305,0.08381499322828978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048343783352044166
mentalhealth,m8sonj4r,2020/02/04,i want to kms but cant afford to go to hospital but im scared and idk pls help what should i do? im alone over an hour away from anyone who knows me i cant drive and i cant afford to go to the hospital and idk what to do. i have so much anger and sadness built up rn and no way to release it. im struggling so much and just any advice that isnt “u have so much to live for” or “ur not alone” would be much appreciated,0.9495918367346938,1.2853323265306145,3.4761224489795914,95.07602040816327,77.77551020408163,6.824489795918367,20.12244897959184,6.868970318607317,-0.08409795918367369,320,6,88,3,7,113,58,98,0.252,0.652,0.096,-0.9536,2,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,2,2,0,11,0,0,0,0,15,15,12,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,3,6,4,0,0,0,0,6,0,13,12,4,8,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,56,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16858719230002034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3573629880633257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732135662251915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063188788850072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16209076205982678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19609726002798275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563833368909862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699001140623512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5590623848948977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481396775250366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234071079266365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5072961606130103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727253262521583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803581917550656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175836233024713,0.1369404943200952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255518093271345,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VeilOFMayaa,2020/02/04,"My boss said hes never heard of depression So im 24 and have been dealing with depression for probably 9 years now. I started my new job 3 months ago and last monday i caved and finally went to seek help for the first time. I took all last week off and got put on medication and havent been feeling good at all since i guess it take around 2 weeks to kick in. I tried going in to work again today and just had a breakdown, i called a crisis line and spoke with a lady for 40 mins. After that i went back to the hospital and they basically just assured me that it takes time to work. 

I called my boss here since ive just been texting him since last week and spoke with him. He doesnt sound upset but he is clearly annoyed and only really cares about his business running smoothly. I told him what was going on and he asked me what depression was and i explained it to him. He just kept saying he doesnt understand and asking me when ill be back since its make him and the others job harder. I dont think hes trying to be rude its just hes religious and doesnt understand it.

Has anyone else had to deal with something like this and how do i go about it? I have a doctors note saying i shoulsnt be working for another week here until the medication is in full effect.",4.697495247148289,4.756057292775665,5.581841730038025,84.32051924904944,69.22813688212928,8.704277566539924,27.46411596958175,8.472884824447931,1.6727796577946767,1000,29,214,14,16,329,143,263,0.064,0.841,0.095,0.7838,2,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,5,17,10,2,1,8,0,25,4,0,5,5,44,51,21,0,0,6,0,2,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,13,21,0,1,6,0,0,8,6,6,0,1,17,9,31,4,29,31,3,44,0,3,0,0,30,9,0,1,28,138,44,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600416328345831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10173604336767664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784004951895714,0.09941052100769016,0.0,0.08637016417513457,0.18140497605494807,0.0,0.0,0.14920788311123656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981406522633997,0.0,0.09892041157427994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20005087671677294,0.250694760851709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993061446350327,0.0,0.0,0.11370908026614487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104944484354945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04905724651659717,0.0,0.0,0.10628287621944263,0.0,0.08252687731585569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16541954283836965,0.0813774639114302,0.07759736939083217,0.0,0.10688068907342782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503181224361787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480042643039694,0.0,0.1925587604379501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372576773891019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04740005628646566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476294912321448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19547894793820808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744204759283851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482936002021001,0.09370446771470196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378961521004992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460614309486477,0.0,0.0,0.09753392382333304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215478789300756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229015511236012,0.15431160273439942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3210304572044021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469228804696743,0.0,0.0,0.06867268235260421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589696310996386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062167790328210674,0.0,0.0,0.1131486356159094,0.0,0.09196552675941584,0.0927086941537618,0.10779502977033832,0.131743160454919,0.0,0.0,0.202006680813622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113008360936004,0.0,0.0,0.1798807618604908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118995497035729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062478997365230535
mentalhealth,Fizzie_lilian,2020/02/04,"Slowly turning into someone I hate I’m slowly turning into the kind of people I hate. I’m fat, I’m lazy, all I do is sit around and do nothing. I don’t know what to do anymore because I’m barely able to get hours at my work. My depression has been better, and I’ve been “recovering” but the sadness and emptiness I’ve felt from my depression has turned into anger.",2.689780701754384,4.067532276315792,4.721052631578949,83.77570175438599,74.92105263157895,6.64561403508772,27.14035087719298,7.1686216300943375,1.4314192982456135,287,11,57,3,6,99,46,76,0.315,0.662,0.023,-0.9768,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,1,8,3,0,2,0,9,1,1,0,1,11,21,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,3,1,7,2,9,18,1,7,0,3,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,33,8,1,0.19019324579975036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886205933836633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16931231207149408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159400373296436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16821047001970027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276263278288637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18261534225159776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936812099363804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37555290879590975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18730203560089012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19805699777523816,0.1045252339084588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18249554888506572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185604907457174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16115011996571746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6206269081942237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846294813284307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gambino12345678910,2020/02/04,"Help with feeling depressed after psychosis. Hi, so 6 months ago I went through an episode of psychosis, which was a pretty horrible experience as you can imagine. I’m no longer paranoid or delusional but I sadly don’t feel the way that I felt before the episode. I now have issues with low energy, low motivation, anhedonia, apathy and low mood. I don’t have the same passion/zest/enthusiasm for life that I had before and I feel like I’ve lost my mojo to be honest. I have been off any medication (Olanzapine) for 2 months now so I would expect any withdrawal symptoms to be fading/have faded. I guess I’m just looking to see if anyone has any advice that could help/lifestyle changes that might help. I’m particularly interested in if anyone can think of any supplements that have helped them in similar situations?

TL;DR Had psychosis, now depressed. Please help!",4.772785714285714,7.187660850000004,5.755892857142857,74.15125000000003,71.75,8.571428571428571,30.17857142857143,9.23628265651192,3.0115446428571433,696,30,117,16,14,229,103,160,0.165,0.642,0.192,0.6986,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,1,2,6,11,0,0,5,0,18,3,0,1,0,22,31,9,0,5,5,0,4,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,7,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,7,6,13,3,15,19,1,16,0,7,2,0,7,6,0,5,9,71,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13565920734886894,0.123060915227272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37762589262845214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19414080119240065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23626148357545795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685955105884474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084130291335996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23914134335887516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579851352958894,0.0,0.0,0.2105838633054926,0.0991773563974736,0.13329477686786945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15293254320895516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4652608680821252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14489832592494006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980569432442806,0.06782339465604204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116578916048187,0.0,0.151545030654986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985263807320214,0.0,0.14727249838131576,0.0,0.0,0.221619253999106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238931197429506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123599963490446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062638635074212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560462944842896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14429341936914888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895412597913394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019365504566958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869313729250922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861804135299734,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,paikifaik,2020/02/05,"Moving back home after a year abroad is killing me I spent 2019 in South Korea for language studies and an ""adventure"" before I enter university and life ""moves on for real"" and it was the most amazing (and hardest) time of my life. 

Only problem is now I'm back home, in my parents house, in the same job as before leaving that I don't enjoy and basically everyone I consider close are still in Korea and I don't know how to deal. 

Before leaving for Korea I had started having some issues with simple things like basic hygiene which then moved on to binge eating and drinking alone at night in my room and I feel myself slipping back there. I cry every night, I feel trapped and I feel like my life is on hold again. The alcohol and food hasn't come into the picture yet but that is more because of a lack of money than anything.

I had a life there! And I felt like I got the chance to figure out who I am and feel like myself for once. Now I'm home alone during the day (since I work in the afternoon) then go to work where I coach children and then come back home again. The only me I'm putting out there is the ""professional"" me which is highly limited because like I said I work with children. And everyone I know and care for except my close family is scattered all over and I can't see them. 

I don't want to be a whiny little child, I have a job, I'm applying for university and have a plan to move away if I get in so there's hope for things getting better. But my fear is, what if it doesn't? My life there was so vastly different, I don't know if I'll ever be able to reach that again, should I strive to go back? Or am I just trying to make it better in my head than it actually was because I'm sad? I'm so frustrated, I didn't even use to have reddit but I needed an outlet that isn't followed by my family",3.7953157894736833,4.255685794736846,5.150105263157896,85.21173684210528,71.31578947368422,7.869473684210527,25.72631578947368,7.839951260653429,1.2727557894736847,1422,40,305,17,25,477,181,380,0.095,0.8079999999999999,0.09699999999999999,0.4542,5,3,2,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,7,25,17,2,1,17,0,32,10,1,3,2,61,64,32,1,9,9,1,5,5,0,1,6,1,5,3,14,26,4,2,9,2,2,11,9,5,0,0,10,7,43,12,45,51,6,60,0,1,1,0,8,25,0,7,29,209,57,6,0.07792707712198324,0.0,0.07604558615503808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328034630592841,0.0,0.16141790064312775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412734465410684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321505415861809,0.2996055607770053,0.0,0.14251086876174354,0.0,0.1989306090911219,0.0,0.0,0.13784033407528545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794518486933011,0.0,0.0,0.13425455361123995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559923504485879,0.05025651799743722,0.08033939474629087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141720965958002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763388684314374,0.0,0.07973885441191976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05147009949130183,0.07048950266619544,0.06565692344254777,0.14892532336315908,0.0,0.0,0.14692542595669444,0.08768962677928291,0.15760908655823186,0.11134223893302214,0.07482221463469184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942297309787749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142736294947818,0.0,0.08857550751724014,0.0,0.06232540234842296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997566308944877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233423547279822,0.3126688485553887,0.07739917076657278,0.0,0.08991738430911737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813356224251031,0.15466119939662204,0.0,0.08621476497844932,0.0,0.12848005085134045,0.0,0.0,0.1650270457810038,0.0,0.0,0.2752109957435959,0.19035616816546988,0.07810340345394272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052016929092594616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33129660177807324,0.0,0.0577819402755417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14625856590800798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298979387024412,0.0,0.11853410735970188,0.0,0.0,0.08652879709614149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745656885240916,0.0,0.0783382361107187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869807417316067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412649546410767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062097791213534086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446208347149987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551571862754045,0.0,0.062232664452125004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354257477462787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0454399053427823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052907370098139964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673039743545321,0.0,0.0,0.04596340910749425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17019552075543878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050182482726973926
mentalhealth,WesleyAwoodson,2020/02/05,"Lexapro 40mg to Pristiq( not what the dose will be but, that’s my next step. Did it help? If anyone made the change Just wondering if anyone had no luck with Lexapro and switch over to Pristiq and what happened? Did it change anything?",2.21478260869565,4.758237000000001,1.8501739130434809,98.18395652173916,81.17391304347827,4.5495652173913035,24.417391304347824,5.6839178017228535,0.285196521739131,186,7,39,1,5,54,35,46,0.054000000000000006,0.79,0.156,0.7423,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,1,0,11,8,5,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,4,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,1,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4116128084038194,0.0,0.2422132481086068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6227364045165112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602801369208284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972870528765272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785076090132531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130294156107606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31919457179645605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,G-Galactic-G,2020/02/05,No Friends Anyone else have or had friends whose parents told them to stay away from you because you were suicidal? I understand the parents point of view of “I don’t want my kid to be traumatized by them” but I feel like those like me who suffer from mental illnesses kind of need friends to walk with them through the battle. I don’t know what do you guys think about all this?,5.035600000000001,5.902910693333332,4.419999999999998,90.09000000000003,68.73333333333333,8.133333333333333,29.666666666666664,8.238735603445708,1.7768666666666668,302,11,64,4,5,90,55,75,0.207,0.62,0.17300000000000001,-0.6261,2,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,3,3,0,1,8,1,0,2,0,7,1,0,0,1,10,14,2,1,2,2,2,1,2,3,0,1,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,3,2,12,6,13,10,1,4,0,1,1,0,16,2,0,1,2,43,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865908270171146,0.20318634422537826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18631355916779466,0.0,0.0,0.12088455252008465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16565792264566556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002686886300442,0.1416687391665374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4596285799671915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963525835235356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20650356943959305,0.10898293996711153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19376307568449586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998442445493301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14704023744944414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4403872493917266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874618035260033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21136615914478726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169128828949323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706548479292046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18948840074537346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064419267073732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696510288375805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blueberryshark420,2020/02/05,"Can loud appartment cause depression? I feel really depressed. I hate where i live because i live in a basment of a house and its so loud from the houseowners i hear the dog walk across the floor above me. And theres always loud banging noises and i often have to stay up until 00-03:00 because i have to wait for the house owners to to to sleep before i can go to bed.

Plz advice",3.185384615384617,4.538062923076922,4.305641025641027,87.34769230769234,73.61538461538461,7.2512820512820495,23.256410256410252,7.793537801064563,1.0219333333333342,300,8,62,4,6,98,53,78,0.151,0.831,0.017,-0.8995,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,6,0,4,1,1,1,0,7,9,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,5,9,0,13,9,0,9,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,1,1,40,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20978941359595135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786365794652418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26174210801844816,0.0,0.1826826172113045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22054243694115666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36981877728938944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855207461645154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201143108140584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119587251408632,0.0,0.0,0.24196757734373586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4954393848216697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37914467816876346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375338334745062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148418005393461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288275172674672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheTiredDuckling,2020/02/05,"I can’t get shit done. Whenever I try do study or something, I just feel so fucking worthless. Like, why am I even trying? I’m fucking stupid.",0.060517241379312026,2.4210749655172417,1.8857758620689644,94.45556034482763,92.44827586206895,4.279310344827587,24.49137931034483,5.985473137389443,0.6472000000000002,110,5,23,1,4,36,24,29,0.32799999999999996,0.579,0.09300000000000001,-0.8281,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,4,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,3,9,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,4,1,0,8,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,3,1,1,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32403478926142265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091391111571993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010375246436592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5854610115041422,0.1654324207592259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15469532877100642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250285505077186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437665471587965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4299583822588065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857202316475856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deadinside255,2020/02/05,"I dont know how to function anymore I wrote this a while back

https://soundgasm.net/u/CelestialCatalyst/The-Duality-of-Aging

And since then its just gotten worse. I feel dead inside. I feel detached from the world and those around me. I can't see a therapist until march 26th and idk how to even exist until then anymore. Im sure in 2 days or whatever Ill be normal again, until something happens and then for weeks Ill be a mess.

Idk. I don't even know how to communicate properly how I'm feeling to those around me. I just feel very isolated and alone. I feel like nothing is real sometimes. Like im empty inside. Like life is so pointless and meaningless there is literally no reason to leave my bed all day.

I cant stand being alone and nothing brings me joy anymore. I try to talk to people but it doesnt help. I just get more sad when I feel dismissed or misunderstood or they just sit there in silence. 

I just dont know what to do.",3.1403744628606525,5.653323408839783,4.0432688766114175,83.98441221608351,77.34254143646409,6.011172498465317,22.76273787599755,7.1686216300943375,0.7969518723143034,751,23,145,9,18,241,104,181,0.213,0.741,0.046,-0.9706,0,2,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,0,19,7,0,0,4,0,13,3,0,5,2,37,29,24,1,1,9,0,6,3,0,0,3,0,1,0,6,9,0,0,10,0,0,1,7,2,0,0,2,7,18,5,17,24,2,22,0,1,1,0,4,5,0,3,17,93,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584186718756392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3711725528794946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22211814018871295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09592947348971248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609142800426429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29242562721163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479999676436755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3784815438216853,0.08912553500601067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517973193772808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032110053333932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362115162455906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695152432789449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056874979245465,0.0,0.0,0.13209832931903806,0.0,0.0,0.08811867794374034,0.18284807805577488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223414997131705,0.2394130197333348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648993104739043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199935963998656,0.0,0.12826969232023586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941418311027583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103199248228798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604307381997744,0.1233866299008389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758082095748122,0.0,0.0,0.1002739487498402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485104500193385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470096723300632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293656186082953,0.0,0.0,0.1000715400576494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12713677068234894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pyjabanana,2020/02/05,"I have been so alone it hurts So I had a falling out with a bunch of my friends, I am going through a rough patch with my mental health and haven’t been reaching out, which they interpreted as me thinking I’m too good for them or at the least not being a good friend. To be fair I haven’t been very present and I understand where they’re coming from.

But ever since I have just been so alone. I’m in university so most of my classes have 200+ people in them so I don’t know anyone and it would be weird to go talk to someone in a lecture hall that I don’t know. 

My parents are divorced and I live with my mom and sibling, but my mom is almost never home and when she is she is tired and wants to be left alone and my sibling would rather hang out with their friends or lock themselves in their room and  watch Netflix. I totally understand them since I used to want the same thing up until a few weeks ago. 

But I’m just so alone and have nobody to have any sort of interaction with and it really had been getting to me lately. I’ve been going to Starbucks just because saying my order and then thanking the barista is the most social interaction I get most days. I’m not really sure how to make friends or meet people right now, especially since I’m still going through a bunch of mental health issues and I feel like nobody would want to hear about that and apart from that my life is really empty/ boring so idk what I would even talk to them about. 

Anw sorry this is long but if anyone wants to chat or has any advice let me know 😊",3.744576802507837,4.5353055736677135,4.417351097178685,89.2184404388715,71.63322884012538,7.179310344827586,24.217868338557988,7.1686216300943375,0.7503404388714731,1214,31,266,11,22,388,157,319,0.098,0.828,0.07400000000000001,-0.7604,1,4,0,0,1,0,15.0,0,0,7,0,21,12,0,0,11,0,35,4,0,3,4,67,62,35,0,10,15,3,2,1,4,4,4,2,2,0,10,23,0,0,8,2,0,7,7,3,0,0,8,5,35,9,39,45,9,36,0,1,1,0,26,15,0,10,14,185,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08973729710660518,0.08140364467530213,0.0,0.0919566156287651,0.38044157681531054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489799838945073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842232457037922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05598001564987908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910525082254917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059224128414552185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06065425746244656,0.08306742138390012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04643308546615279,0.06560489384550396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28379711124705925,0.0,0.09595699805593697,0.0,0.20876126881104926,0.1540488716805504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19522652528156847,0.10350148754445697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211511648607844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830819721639647,0.0,0.0,0.09584888764930903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514056153018003,0.0,0.10359064544705668,0.0,0.09977588071711242,0.09390457735379948,0.06486375102169498,0.04486454134569677,0.0,0.08108945548784148,0.08126854752160381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06129866156798953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18509038093268407,0.0,0.0,0.2151053675208376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082660189703892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196871560102784,0.0,0.0,0.1273296759382446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649004683070868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842413943886678,0.0,0.073028597678849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22789346704722194,0.0,0.0,0.09361129444565312,0.07780906790646869,0.0,0.0,0.10279855398677266,0.0,0.0,0.07333725968202442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865506981434954,0.0,0.0,0.1476223792150951,0.0,0.08454668961960557,0.0,0.0,0.061009188351833686,0.05884232252160864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055475273183932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19120097724562185,0.0,0.07931347771021062,0.0,0.07577112679598991,0.2166598842754406,0.0,0.07366219750597207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260939648695041,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cathalll,2020/02/05,"what is happening to me? for a month now i see a blue light and when i focus on it i see mountains, every few days it turns into a road and mountains forming in the sides, sometimes it gets very realisitic for a few seconds and i can see the tyre tracks, the rocks in the sides and trees.... i've got some mental problems but im lost on this",3.0399999999999987,3.703977444444448,4.120444444444445,91.169,73.16666666666667,6.871111111111111,25.511111111111113,6.742157984588678,0.7862911111111117,264,8,60,2,5,86,48,72,0.07400000000000001,0.9259999999999999,0.0,-0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,10,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,5,5,0,8,8,4,12,0,1,4,0,0,8,0,1,4,40,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971810312480736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20866147690114906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939042009843452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980737113559708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21900202899527232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675117671863963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703465767980333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24957973498815095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19767723960409814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369740444387819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5920510502561136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449388391571236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26937940650262976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20434273947898468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Healing200,2020/02/05,"Dealing with Pure OCD, Depression, Anxiety + Social Anxiety whilst also dealing with toxic co-workers. Reddit, should I just quit my job without notice? So basically like the title says, I'm dealing with a cocktail of mental health issues the best I can whilst in a toxic work environment where nobody likes me/they talk down to me and think I'm stupid. Every time I say something they look at each other and laugh, they speak down to me like I'm a child because I'm not all loud and I refuse to join their toxic clique. I go to work everyday in my own head because it's like they're watching me waiting for me to make mistakes. I've been told they talk about me behind my back. 
I feel like a loser, like a quitter, but this is retail and it's driving me back into a bad depression. At the same time I want to see if I can stick it out so it prepares me for the future for tough times like this. I'm quiet at work because I'm literally focusing on not letting my mental health devour me, its like I'm constantly keeping my intrusive thoughts and panicmattacks at bay. On top of this, I'm so anxious I physically find it hard to talk, I'm aware of my voice and my face and breathing and it's all too much. They look at me like I'm a freak. I try help myself with counselling medication and meditation and self-help books. Whilst they've helped I've still got such a long journey and I don't know if I can face it with bullies. 
There's that saying something like 'be nice because you never know what someone's going through' I've even tried telling them I have social anxiety and they still continue. On top of this I get abuse from horrible customers. My parents are pressurising me to stay, but I don't want to. 
Do I tough it somehow or just quit without notice or hand my notice in?",4.879460435986992,5.36119523822715,5.698063350596173,82.16596290497414,68.91689750692521,8.383524027459954,30.10008430687704,8.321376580360154,2.063468168132,1415,52,284,19,23,464,180,361,0.14300000000000002,0.731,0.126,-0.8485,2,0,3,0,1,0,32.0,0,1,7,9,17,22,1,0,12,0,13,8,5,1,4,52,41,22,0,6,12,1,3,10,0,1,3,7,0,1,16,20,1,3,6,2,1,4,7,9,0,0,4,14,44,13,42,34,7,39,0,3,4,0,27,18,0,5,26,171,60,5,0.0,0.09680246937673227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533635752493673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18750340347932895,0.09229901224847924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564623899307095,0.0682170239814644,0.19921698192239165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574028669076575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828988772848095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526908070399007,0.1407381128462306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396282035711796,0.0,0.06883671879301506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041310541987725435,0.05836729768433181,0.0,0.0,0.07467334511518188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042685464011382984,0.0,0.09286526055775622,0.0,0.0653438505822476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318815732901028,0.0,0.08384892166308414,0.1736889437519904,0.0,0.0,0.1642876191177352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852747444621114,0.08107575662124702,0.07261971092814039,0.0,0.0,0.08980159966125484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354493238321427,0.0,0.399150411913174,0.0,0.0,0.07230292174143642,0.1372167305898182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05453613317042432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230528474305696,0.1646710287779044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06005972511874212,0.0,0.06301294178799194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790518057827281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071942699869244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737983994868107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949160337136709,0.0,0.0,0.06510521613419562,0.0,0.08523208831076619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16656800946563904,0.0692250953066436,0.12579503011770582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708252507771075,0.1304932426929677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970048005749636,0.07141038150954697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05235077985407891,0.0,0.06486156454505618,0.14292174330096594,0.0,0.0,0.078068923032002,0.0,0.110939397296326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963788767918582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15751393166135208,0.0,0.23791755868314626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chedthereked,2020/02/05,"Please help me I just don't know how to explain this. I have a good job, a girlfriend, friends and a family but no matter what I just feel down. Today I was stood on the end of a train platform n I stopped myself from stepping on the tracks and watched the train ride by, I just thought that could've been it, all of my problems gone. I don't know how to explain this to anyone. I feel bad because I'm not diagnosed with anything as I do not go to the doctors about it, so I will not take anything away from the ppl that actually are diagnosed. Sometimes I feel the best in the world but some days I feel the lowest, 1 thing can trigger me off and that's it, I'm either angry or just want it to stop. My GF thinks I'm bipolar but I don't think so. I need something to help me control my emotions (alcohol or weed) without it I'm a wreck n cannot control emotions, please someone advice me before its too late ❤️",2.322852233676976,3.4911790515463927,3.686989690721649,91.66436769759451,75.49484536082474,6.20426116838488,27.366323024054985,6.42735559955562,0.9612162199312708,712,28,160,5,15,234,111,194,0.13699999999999998,0.746,0.11699999999999999,-0.7896,2,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,10,5,0,0,13,0,11,5,0,5,1,42,32,13,0,3,14,0,4,0,3,1,5,0,0,0,13,4,1,4,11,0,0,4,9,2,0,0,5,5,22,3,21,26,4,18,0,0,1,0,7,8,0,3,6,105,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.1306225200396391,0.0,0.0,0.13080090478673453,0.0,0.14304957400257376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359406172366697,0.0,0.2203014214419325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576055182926305,0.0,0.1117627767429898,0.08159635885044708,0.0,0.11390017832867637,0.0,0.14047186405997014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002580320772505,0.1068717928708204,0.0,0.0,0.08632497112796354,0.0,0.0,0.2717186602495248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700558145838934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011362160753148,0.11855520874136312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618595218158735,0.0,0.2707230900345677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034155254388774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607250197337972,0.11227066363083284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17943947542167588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282977118719644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471256813670329,0.0,0.1509935176208856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925129166844013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29386372330491045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808051901461165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341434176124135,0.10304760487824073,0.13238535773138335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22381643155042594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064179984710768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892687092240015,0.17153690324405238,0.0,0.10626538852559486,0.0,0.0,0.1268782562660875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895075349926851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290308001633256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Uhhhhhhuuh,2020/02/05,Would I be kicked of school if I went to the pysch ward I already missed a lot of school and I don't want to be kicked out so any suggestions,0.2411458333333308,1.821121656250004,1.4762500000000005,103.47708333333335,82.4375,5.5166666666666675,16.916666666666664,6.42735559955562,-0.7418458333333335,111,2,30,1,3,35,24,32,0.125,0.875,0.0,-0.3447,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,7,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,5,3,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,19,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3850889613163833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373065681528451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966755656496011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7063376632012619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058272120321667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32349187226688897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24789305403335984,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Natalie14444,2020/02/05,Does anyone know if Aripiprazole is benefic for derealization ? I know that it depends from case to case but i wanna hear some opinions .,4.1575000000000015,7.450103083333339,4.738333333333333,75.34,80.66666666666666,6.533333333333335,28.83333333333333,7.793537801064563,2.4609333333333336,110,5,17,2,3,35,21,24,0.0,0.925,0.075,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,8,4,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618916168838032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4529222850570974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5833303641348615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5688774451550827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,browtfiwasboredokai,2020/02/05,"Do I have borderline personality disorder? [confused] Hi. So I'm just basically so confused. I don't know who I am, sometimes, if I'm quiet or shy or extroverted or cold. I never know how I'm going to act or why I act or if it's me. It's super odd, like i get offended so easily, if you tell me something bad about myself off hand I'll dwell on it for hours and I'll still be nice to you but think that you're out to get me?? But if you say a nice thing to me or act friendly I'll think ""oh this person's nice"" and you'll just be like an ally to me, until you say one bad thing to me in which case you turn into an enemy. I wouldn't say I have explosive anger, but i keep a lot of things pent up because I'm bad at confrontation/shouting and hate hearing shouting but when I blow up, I blow up. Im always worrying about what people think of me, if I'm a nice person, but I'm also like really low key manipulative/ a good lier?? Like sometimes I act super dumb or young or stuck up or intelligent and it's not an act but it is but I can't control myself. I also have this weird thing where I constantly jump to bad conclusions like if I trip a bit I see myself face plant onto the floor and crack my head open, and every time I cross the road I can SEE myself getting hit by a car. I also deal with extremes in the way that I'm either super arrogant/overconfident or just extremely unsure and self loathing and doubting the next. I feel like some of these are signs of borderline personality disorder, because I can kinda resonate with the symptoms. I am in no way trying to  self diagnose; I have a history of self harm/suicidal thoughts/low mood and theres something odd about my personality... My therapist thinks I may have aspergers but I doubt it. Anyway, if any of you know anyone with bpd or have it or have an affiliation with psychology and can help me sort this out (if there's any questions I'll answer) then I'd be grateful. I want to be able to bring this up with my therapist, but I don't want to sound like an idiot. Thanks! Sorry this was a bit of a word vomit :p",2.5107726477318617,3.7616453249427937,4.732944541661059,84.02221665096249,75.15560640732265,7.978705074707228,24.294588773724588,8.583994105835817,1.489206272715036,1625,50,353,31,34,567,200,437,0.177,0.654,0.16899999999999998,-0.6938,0,0,2,0,0,0,48.0,0,7,0,5,19,34,5,5,19,0,26,6,3,3,1,83,57,49,0,11,34,0,2,7,1,3,3,7,0,8,22,19,0,2,11,0,0,11,7,16,0,1,2,12,51,17,44,47,5,43,0,1,2,0,26,20,1,30,17,224,73,0,0.08271355121468242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984379910683957,0.06882430065505274,0.0,0.0,0.11249610238902573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783523819516356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762494412676699,0.10084282620208858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18060355060897612,0.0,0.10417482222976544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938396433566681,0.09277028096328288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527403936249163,0.0,0.08395251337632773,0.0,0.0,0.18959379131608145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968973430458167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04182245675828143,0.059090577514718114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06390428448862852,0.0,0.12964324990122486,0.0,0.04700801728983977,0.06937620244101854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166250758509902,0.08488796640636732,0.0,0.09322418365674263,0.0,0.05544114985237132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814561865703689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934482902850771,0.0,0.0,0.07351960477772163,0.0,0.0,0.13637161380404786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828676417044913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032010337814057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379378982545034,0.0,0.08796680008159434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05604884294659947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057343161804905625,0.36111141255131496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926581072459144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052988418909650885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19733140741430807,0.0,0.0,0.13182398271705095,0.0,0.25886481921642623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735386548711164,0.1636116342626981,0.09259104872665866,0.0,0.0,0.06605514884549521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047520007626003,0.0,0.0,0.08597105016517277,0.0,0.0,0.07229528950897815,0.07615152504240348,0.0,0.1920736162132984,0.21980483235923284,0.21199801516620834,0.0,0.0,0.04823093687804021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056157071814671486,0.0899685919274292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757319108127152,0.1313083339106247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746361147013521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399962626983165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Adalid0987,2020/02/05,"How intrussive thoughts have been haunt me For the past months, I've started to have this bizarre, inmoral thoughts. Some of them related to sexual things, other to violent things. I've had dreams about some of those intrusive thoughts, that still make me want to puke.

The most common one is related to my dad. Mayne while I masturbate, I think about fucking my dad. I had a dream where me and my dad had a relationship behind my mom, and I felt him fucking me. Every time I think about those thoughs, I wanna cry, puke and kill myself. I feel so bad with myself, for not being able to control these horrendous thoughts.

Other intrusive thoughts that I may have are related to bestiality, violence or really dangerous ones, like the urge to jump off a cliff, or being really conscious (with images in my head) of how I could fall off the stairs and break my neck.",6.498518518518517,7.126267493827164,6.169975308641978,79.6808888888889,65.41975308641976,10.183703703703703,32.24938271604938,10.125756701596842,3.103022716049382,682,26,129,15,10,212,95,162,0.218,0.733,0.048,-0.9871,0,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,1,1,9,7,5,0,7,0,13,4,2,4,0,30,27,11,1,3,3,4,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,1,10,2,0,2,1,6,0,2,10,2,23,1,23,13,3,15,0,0,0,2,7,5,2,6,8,95,33,0,0.15325948351689808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12796526708370673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17189354268259788,0.12236522675056855,0.0,0.16834834613238409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12912772489030958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749259979837786,0.0,0.1471531384726922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833718458419124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15728844545040252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16955891122984829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487484221082318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230189532692267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17949565479474874,0.12233025756242615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20770518483531786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630351868890934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19636389914857344,0.0,0.0,0.16454332953658013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847785125549306,0.0,0.12239322150994035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036375816730416,0.19640497738182724,0.15057666441445247,0.6083545533099216,0.08936683731882178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903964141945631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,areyoureadyreddit412,2020/02/05,"Hospital Inpatient programs for depression and anxiety (United States) did it help you? 24f battling chronic depression and anxiety/panic disorder for 5 years. I've tried several medications, therapy, lifestyle changes and went off my meds last July to try a more holistic approach because I felt so awful on the medication.

It's getting very bad again. And I am considering admitting myself. I wanted to hear others experiences voluntarily admitting yourself to the hospital and if it helped you or not. 

My thinking is, I think about killing myself every day. And I can't get into a psychiatrist for 3 weeks, I went to urgent Care and they dismissed me with sleeping pills and told me to exercise more. 

I feel like the only way I can get help is to admit myself and hope they can help me. I'm just scared I'm not in the right headspace to be my own advocate and that's dangerous because they could just throw pills at me without actually listening to what's worked and what hasn't or being around addicts and people with more severe mental illness will not be helpful. 

I just would like to hear others experiences in hospital inpatient programs in the US. 

I didn't include a lot of detail and am lacking information because of where my head is at so please don't make judgments based solely on the information I'm sharing with you. It's just all I can get out and wanted to give a breif idea of what I'm going through.",6.154966832504144,7.354935574626868,6.992039800995027,71.45188225538973,66.38805970149254,10.134660033167496,35.411276948590384,10.25414643259724,3.930728192371476,1146,55,194,28,18,381,150,268,0.142,0.755,0.10300000000000001,-0.9186,0,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,1,3,3,1,10,12,3,1,10,1,19,10,2,1,1,50,47,19,1,7,11,0,2,2,0,2,8,3,0,0,10,20,0,0,10,1,0,5,8,7,0,0,6,5,29,5,33,35,7,25,0,2,0,0,23,13,0,5,7,136,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.1069505896147581,0.11947660234335715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384119114331416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756431702951712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150868369419003,0.20042743058756896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174116070861716,0.0,0.11593879819980805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750406329055634,0.0,0.0,0.07068081796164205,0.0,0.18879098941141575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560733661803078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923399638232166,0.0,0.0,0.21441324506885326,0.0,0.0,0.05541539485829052,0.07829591896784317,0.10523003866585516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290390519304227,0.1051351607900288,0.06228634187316121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247785380744446,0.0,0.2470469383249341,0.0,0.3673018574953103,0.0,0.0,0.10885427238737763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237213571976307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12125253304174938,0.0,0.0,0.08933595482324114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708684330789013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317521248686196,0.0,0.0,0.07315666191407863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217372495766636,0.22081433133052264,0.11044771676149744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335324449819677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598056642649192,0.0,0.0,0.1203042877457532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359500041396918,0.0,0.0,0.10972543644475226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476261972210107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967586986264397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12533340125130168,0.0,0.0,0.14045030624944144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472436302736787,0.0,0.14881795809755655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318313603792418,0.0,0.0,0.09042877224512982,0.12928597051586213,0.08699277536344968,0.0879118783501561,0.0,0.0,0.2031945156672576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564732751859277,0.0,0.0797877177577608,0.0,0.0,0.07785436570416973,0.0,0.0,0.07057669468205822
mentalhealth,PhoGam,2020/02/05,"not sure what to do I'm not diagnosed with anything nor do i think i have actual depression but i have been feeling a lot of sadness for the past few months because i have realised i am bisexual.(even though i have kinda accepted it i still just feel sad for no reason) i have been feeling just empty, knowing that i would not be accepted if i came out to most of the people in my life.I have also started cutting because i didnt have an outlet. I havent talked to any professional because im to scared to ask my parents to help. if anyone could tell me what i should do, that would be great. thanks",2.9090243902439,4.500467747967483,4.364723577235772,85.67732926829271,74.77235772357723,7.196422764227643,26.934146341463407,7.908726449838941,1.6020478048780498,475,18,97,7,10,158,76,123,0.16899999999999998,0.672,0.158,-0.1179,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,5,10,1,1,4,0,21,1,0,1,1,27,31,6,0,6,8,1,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,8,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,4,3,16,5,13,21,3,7,0,3,0,0,5,2,0,5,4,75,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.1745683182176418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430562060601097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12164958069024792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12508224420490854,0.0,0.14720910540695284,0.0,0.167235590744594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32714433467253196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045995536381225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428270495830408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407547370663466,0.1815669669124284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815345453939925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27135256529086343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19722401334139925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990446760907696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19322911207313306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831184835154606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635347588488338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520836883835042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278623287308714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19863331128348805,0.0,0.1707682850173536,0.12401801379565505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839260625958772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790975157299554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661743741555273,0.0,0.14285972560539653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16859927738431607,0.0,0.0,0.14378293298197398,0.15635549086374773,0.16469550310811484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462383631279427,0.17575598301477405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541529829023542,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_LIKE_THE_NUMBER_5,2020/02/05,"I've felt like shit for the past 3 months Okay, I'm a teen that lives in Sweden and I have been feeling really bad since the closest thing to my dad, that isn't my real dad killed himself.
I've known this person my entire life and his son witch we can call Noah have been really close friends since about four years back. 
The 30th November last year the day went pretty well, it was a weekend so I pretty much just sat at my computer. I started talking to Noah via discord and we started to play some games.
But in the afternoon I got a call from Noah, I didn't have time to talk with him then so I figured that I would call him back in the evening. Terrible mistake. 
Shortly after the call I started making early dinner for myself and I got interrupted by my dad who came home ran into the kitchen and told me that an airplane had crashed into Noah's garden, first I got really shocked and then a couple of minutes later it sinked in. Noah's dad was a pilot that flied small single engine propeller planes, so I thought his dad had deliberately crashed into their garden. 
I pulled up the news on my phone, and it said that the pilot had died.
I got devastated, still hoping that it wasn't him I asked my dad if it was true. 
He said it was Noah's dad. 
I got even sadder and started crying and shaking uncontrollable.
Some time went by and I had calmed myself.
I remembered that Noah called me, I thought it was just before the crash. I pulled up my phone to check when the call was made. 15:45.
The crash happened 15:37.
I got a feeling in my entire body that I've never felt before, it was scary. I didn't know how to process everything that happened the past 2 hours. 
It was really hard to sleep that night and all the other night between then and now, what usually happens is I end up browsing YouTube or Reddit half the night to not think about what happened.

I still think about that phone call every day and about the crash every day.
I feel like my life has gone from a solid 9/10 to a 3/10.

I just felt like I needed to help get this weight off my shoulders and I didn't know who to tell this to.

Sorry for bad spelling and grammar.",2.220376016260161,4.338895782407409,3.0507497741644087,91.95703252032524,78.44444444444444,5.6961156278229454,21.647696476964764,6.697824305789354,0.3724809620596208,1686,48,353,16,41,532,205,432,0.142,0.77,0.087,-0.9790000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,2,0,1,1,20,20,2,2,26,1,26,9,4,3,3,59,68,26,2,5,7,8,8,3,1,1,2,2,4,1,30,23,3,0,15,5,1,8,7,10,1,3,39,10,51,10,41,28,5,63,0,0,0,0,41,18,1,5,40,221,81,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524532455246912,0.0,0.0,0.10733020638232893,0.11654542661038393,0.0,0.0,0.11877429374218752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752225861810665,0.0,0.0,0.4988521269688496,0.07982250800188083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772226041889889,0.07666232512263259,0.1350285964669624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243221776240545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618142631308234,0.0,0.0,0.09219282156501976,0.0,0.11760414468345667,0.0,0.06272380508688692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586554041350056,0.04985882710570935,0.20103140904404584,0.0,0.0,0.05936433511221687,0.0,0.0,0.05392048623723445,0.0,0.036463006760750434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3349102539804061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.246864411068383,0.0,0.06251918158328823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046779551347972514,0.0,0.0700062357774307,0.06931838106286373,0.06873024589903269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772135912159207,0.0,0.07671080569023075,0.0568891199512559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985911372780951,0.10228932381476644,0.0,0.06162688336613291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660380942726659,0.046586149138921805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05570664751414561,0.0,0.051304541575781085,0.05174926959684519,0.05382725421041711,0.0,0.0,0.19648286095781767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332471411093569,0.0,0.06093895927759368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420054242760218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943763278317555,0.1788400471369999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790597927161301,0.0,0.13277477287017142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163963496519721,0.1154639570922478,0.0,0.06984157418722843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812550298478509,0.19759420255934332,0.0,0.11147063996486152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121910005609026,0.061000560356471924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04636615343143638,0.08943872973904167,0.0,0.11081278937900466,0.08139158708847016,0.0,0.0,0.0666884555257799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686511575661567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498684544702227,0.06275064506478166,0.12939423100255146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04957764606688028,0.0,0.0,0.08988645293991401
mentalhealth,Sabre-23,2020/02/05,"Not sure if this is the right place. Left the military a year ago, have been pushing friends and family away, had a traumatic event at a new job which led to me taking time out. Its been 7 months since I've worked, I'm financially screwed, anti depressants aren't working and I'm still pushing everyone away. I don't know what to do from here. I feel like I have nobody who understands the situation in my life. And vetran support seems non existent in the UK. Just fed up of everything. Anyone been through similar or have any advice for me please.",3.7065939771547254,5.669565308411219,4.596199376947045,83.2855347871236,73.48598130841121,8.867705088265836,27.77673935617861,9.444778638647367,2.5345044652128763,436,17,86,11,9,141,83,107,0.125,0.779,0.096,-0.4874,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,5,6,1,0,7,0,11,3,0,1,1,14,20,5,0,1,4,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,4,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,5,1,6,4,13,15,0,20,0,1,0,1,2,10,1,3,8,51,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181924648774006,0.16502981417955218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12660301358633586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017545126444405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3498285315146256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603492521743311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778948597941529,0.1673189523391205,0.0,0.17550593452146335,0.0,0.09413391128649756,0.1330009667721623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383564986742428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847465008698704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231499526694517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022758946485109,0.0,0.1314984460560252,0.09095399783466383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860032626337144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980560829112094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945096075017836,0.204360416072173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15898945569834144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16948355419651515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15400300019141352,0.2092645819721884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867681153635198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126522781004706,0.17546444865834315,0.0,0.13997780916746186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855810694198602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19381111172389065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710701589104532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988835111767066
mentalhealth,AshlynFS,2020/02/05,"Need advice My twin sister who is 16 was diagnosed with anxiety and depression, as well as anorexia about 8 months ago. It’s a long story that i won’t be able to fit into this post but basically she has this boyfriend who she has been on and off with every other day for the past year. He’s very toxic for her and is emotional and verbally abusive. He threatens to post personal text messages and pictures from her online and he has before. She is constantly crying and getting upset over him, and every time she vows she will stop talking to him and not go back to him. But she eventually does every time. She sneaks him into our house at night when my dad is sleeping and they drink and smoke weed in her room. At first I wasn’t too worried about the weed because even i have smoked occasionally however she has gotten to the point where she smokes several times a day every day, even before she goes to school. She is on anti depressants and an anxiety medication but she often skips her doses because she “forgets.” She sees a psychiatrist about every 3 months but she refuses to go to a therapist even though i’ve recommended her to my old therapist who was actually very nice and helpful with my anxiety when i was going to her. She constantly has outbursts, presumably from fighting with her boyfriend, and the police has even come to the house to talk to her. The visit from the police was actually very unprofessional and i think it was handled horribly, especially when they were dealing with a mentally unstable teenage girl. They threatened to throw her in jail and “baker act” her. She used to talk to me about what she was going through and when she was fighting with her boyfriend, but now she has completely shut me out and is not talking to anyone about her problems. She has said a few times before that she has thought about harming herself and i have gotten a few worrying text from her boyfriend to check on her because she is telling him she wants to commit suicide and such. When i ask her about it she says she’s not serious and would never do that, but i’m not sure. It’s come to a point where she is crying non stop everyday even in school and she will barely get out of her bed. Sorry for the huge essay but i just need some advice on what to do. My parents think maybe we should check her into a hospital but i’m not sure.",6.058975563909772,6.533663287280703,6.339498746867168,78.61815789473684,66.34649122807018,9.584461152882202,31.417293233082706,9.516144504307137,2.7356687969924818,1873,69,357,35,28,602,204,456,0.18,0.775,0.045,-0.997,2,0,4,0,4,2,27.0,2,0,3,1,27,12,2,1,18,0,37,5,1,1,4,71,59,38,1,6,14,3,0,0,0,5,3,2,2,2,15,36,1,3,4,1,2,9,8,8,1,1,14,3,71,4,61,39,3,64,0,2,1,0,82,24,0,2,29,262,86,2,0.07614425189055167,0.09021848729009233,0.14861161180958465,0.0,0.0,0.14881456337398605,0.06749728501971186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747504328408686,0.0,0.0,0.05324183136391406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118459679922186,0.0,0.0,0.0585502295996642,0.0,0.13925048762125816,0.0,0.19437945020912595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311830614617522,0.07983579940222693,0.1645697711052445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16728177048630946,0.14732022963784608,0.07850138021627817,0.1311658651561338,0.07728481284499948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666343479564803,0.0,0.0,0.0745923784332888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08565203464075567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514628012008325,0.0,0.3207740814622248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476826175979418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956445774942786,0.0,0.17309813237749574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05103788699029314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757204867174858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738526680326838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649713550712711,0.0,0.0,0.07670732299814366,0.07673549658649884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155523080100185,0.0,0.0,0.11291999591306337,0.05872714120222355,0.0,0.0,0.07145622224619881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990058351728117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454918065977828,0.0,0.07268830433122303,0.0,0.06648622373011924,0.0,0.0,0.14396186006765602,0.0,0.14585029019168905,0.0,0.0,0.07285976555341836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243062040614626,0.06055296530985264,0.0,0.15412409612166544,0.06067711032724396,0.0,0.0,0.08602133103671651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619924235862585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523725596975157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732000818880496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328945285608673,0.0,0.14353011255327738,0.0,0.0,0.2448074615065086,0.06655343234609938,0.0,0.0,0.1768186905252645,0.0,0.09758032408265972,0.07481134087698378,0.060450030605626134,0.17760130245293534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576418577158483,0.0,0.18848094684261787,0.044911852594586944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846282700663674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546563678495985,0.0,0.05409069185773315,0.0,0.0,0.04903440173015327
mentalhealth,lonelyshygirl,2020/02/05,"I don't know what is going on with me and I have nobody to talk about it I've had a ski accident about 4 weeks ago. My kneecap jumped out, a muscle and a ligament ripped. 

Since that accident, I have been angry, bitter and sad for nearly all the time. I start crying when i think about what happened. I don't know exactly what triggers it all. Maybe that after the accident i was laying alone in the snow for an hour after someone came to me. That my group just abandoned me or that my teachers didn't care enough about me to bring me to a hospital immediatly while everyone else that has been in an accident in those 2 weeks was brought to a hospital immediatly. Maybe it's how lonely and isolated I am now. That I don't feel normal anymore since I fail to do normal tasks. 

I just wish I had someone to talk about this. I haven't felt this lonely before",3.5067904509283814,4.7646266551724175,4.820804597701152,84.3392705570292,72.67816091954023,8.112466843501327,25.453580901856764,8.617729084823388,1.6317007957559686,674,21,140,12,13,224,94,174,0.244,0.741,0.015,-0.9894,0,5,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,1,0,10,0,17,0,0,2,3,24,30,8,0,3,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,15,7,0,1,5,1,0,5,5,6,0,0,10,3,21,1,23,20,3,22,0,5,0,0,3,6,0,1,11,100,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882496089206998,0.0,0.0,0.17388411482402058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16650244436279862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286260584232865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920222152239724,0.17117574105626135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844200321784106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025112272076742,0.0,0.0,0.17347595596329696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16042674278818556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489057407886491,0.0,0.1612013848413308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095416144419912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484651768652624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16533850414859966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18453665775456127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3373375150386803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32899444633408764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27776181648986403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845064624420182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883388984083725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698883434656154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757757079559746,0.0,0.0,0.09789840763306168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693435584310228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19306600025490112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Eximio00,2020/02/05,"Does weight lifting cause psychotic breaks? I was diagnosed with GAD and have had a few depression episodes. But I've never experience anything like this, it was as if i was getting ripped from my body. The episode has passed now, still struggling to type and talk a bit, but feeling way better. From what I've read, stress seems to be the cause of these episodes. My question is, did weight lifting cause my break? And will just enduring the change make my brain get used to the stress? I used to weight lift pretty often, but took a very long break. (being lazy)",3.6431132075471697,6.092223311320758,2.9043773584905668,93.11939622641512,75.32075471698113,6.1267924528301885,24.75094339622641,7.1686216300943375,0.8998671698113209,445,15,89,5,10,129,74,106,0.121,0.792,0.087,-0.4301,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,3,7,0,11,6,2,6,1,20,19,8,0,1,5,0,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,4,3,0,3,1,0,2,1,4,0,0,6,4,7,2,9,10,2,10,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,4,5,51,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274720451184185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12117383325158095,0.14957896842170992,0.15218674887753075,0.0,0.15294799512545126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42223971712886377,0.14493796129084907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180061443634068,0.1390618324490104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989800052252665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402165235695118,0.0,0.0,0.06927615672750112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316369394123726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693595669057012,0.0,0.0,0.12124916056304175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145495379723552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567022898084684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938799145420178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348207774452471,0.0,0.13704664962081575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472836943444687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941602188811683,0.0,0.31388800566455155,0.1432321535465427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012310485425583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522226767107514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236664561800914,0.0,0.11304724643303515,0.0,0.10875182168510758,0.0,0.5005222475387953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DeRUINER,2020/02/05,"I'm really trying to get better mentally but I really feel like my surroundings make this impossible 
Right now I'm in a new school and I find it really hard to make friends. Everybody's already in their own groups and it's the graduating year, and if I'm being honest I'm not the best at making friends. I'll try but I overthink it and it doesn't get far. At school I try to not beat myself up about it but I'm constantly conscious of how alone I am and I'm constantly thinking of the stuff I do wrong.

At home I feel like a tool, 80% of the conversations that I have with my parents are them asking me to do things. And when I do talk to them I don't feel like they care, like last week I got accepted to an accounting program in college and while it wasn't a particularly hard program to get into, I would've expected more than an ""oh, cool"".

I try and I try to make myself feel better, like at school I tell myself that I should accept things for how they are and wait for a future where I will fit in, but it's so difficult to keep that mentality up when you're surrounded by loneliness. But at the end of the day I just have this dread about life that I can't seem to shake.",2.997964444444449,3.8949187520000015,4.6946666666666665,86.1417777777778,73.48,8.595555555555555,24.288888888888888,8.998388855275968,1.5199022222222225,928,26,210,19,18,315,125,250,0.105,0.701,0.195,0.9755,1,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,5,4,10,19,0,2,12,1,15,1,0,6,0,40,39,21,0,3,9,1,6,5,2,2,1,0,1,0,16,11,0,2,10,0,1,1,6,4,0,0,2,7,30,15,33,34,3,32,0,0,0,0,13,18,0,2,18,135,46,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012411089827592,0.11733598597259312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940266052272463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158505073413268,0.18807758217004653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840884637594418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22980636015425104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857299394008197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417536437441296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150512484372796,0.22788299846057666,0.0,0.0,0.09718219199822634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16429804972001555,0.0,0.16665653397563746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504050037389213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904986457101467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665601155622448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450952919530324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667180241250325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510286305283581,0.2597333218893841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28390001580531754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143079503208992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269258976540696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180650573368188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20435000456390387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090803835910503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3228299216549295,0.0,0.09679734279982033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172052992950674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546270571075099,0.0929356706308373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412796714830723,0.06813091781529981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3609498741347771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852901943585038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553261410384685,0.11625336667537325,0.0,0.06847197579646344
mentalhealth,wowimadad2019,2020/02/05,My girlfriend says her mind keeps racing and that she cant stop thinking.. Today has been an off day. Any tips to make her feel better or to distract her?,2.120860215053764,4.286297000000005,2.523870967741935,95.37247311827957,79.0,4.133333333333334,20.010752688172047,3.1291,-0.5292021505376336,121,3,25,0,3,37,28,31,0.065,0.794,0.141,0.3794,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,8,7,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,5,1,3,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,3,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605553870782771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33886536157854635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471002882738047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19373233699306472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34056164922865656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557558439395589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38687264489593387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046965488856615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203308615912722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24550728304541866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36318174555255706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Joemama5762,2020/02/05,"I need advice I want to get better. How do I start?

I'm sick of feeling like shit. I'm going to give it one more shot, not for myself but for a very close friend of mine. I can't rely on myself to want to feel better because help is the last thing I want right now but I will do it for that friend

I do not know where the fuck to start. I feel like I have exhausted all of my resources. Therapy doesn't work, meds make me feel like shit and meditation and excersise leaves me alone in my head.

How do you cope?",0.8383783783783798,2.4044977477477474,2.5588198198198207,96.48741891891892,80.53153153153153,5.881441441441443,17.406306306306305,6.742157984588678,-0.3614223423423426,394,7,97,4,10,130,69,111,0.151,0.601,0.249,0.8703,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,3,4,11,3,0,3,0,9,6,3,3,1,20,27,6,0,4,4,0,4,3,2,1,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,0,4,17,7,13,26,2,10,0,0,0,1,5,5,3,0,7,59,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367183777174492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16287306994698308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958637284694277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27816590705134153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180598394230436,0.3370379406039665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429960843808269,0.14538356568883748,0.08216142403307466,0.15085732242865035,0.08937400854531047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16139327443271034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540750464152504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642552540425953,0.1281872100634026,0.0,0.16651475123603487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23048665632939555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049717149928268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746794828006349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660567957673255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106562881339538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13429846921867195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32284854974088883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22261769537380496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983956253615435,0.0,0.1044760027020998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12975528214253088,0.27826659311290314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11448654639590605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,momo236236,2020/02/05,I keep making bad choices and I'm fucked I feel so depressed in a small town in France. The only people i met here are vapid with 0 personality and mostly international students that have nothing in common with each other. My boyfriend has mental health issues and is quite unsocial too.  And he keeps making me realise how boring my other interactions are.  I don't know what to do really because I've tried to get along with these people despite everything but i just feel very uninspired and alone. It's putting me into a lot of depression but i camt quit and go back home because i need the independence from my family. I thought i would meet more forward thinking and kind people here than a patriarchal country like India but it's quite the opposite.,4.752934272300472,6.998784739436622,5.478521126760565,76.86078638497655,71.32394366197184,7.550234741784037,28.734741784037556,8.344100000000001,2.2864206572769947,611,24,103,10,12,198,100,142,0.12,0.8240000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.7901,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,7,7,1,0,6,0,8,2,0,4,0,32,23,12,0,2,4,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,7,13,0,2,5,0,1,3,1,5,0,0,2,2,14,2,13,20,4,11,0,2,0,1,5,7,1,2,4,69,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15623909914886458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599730322172945,0.1259566681673344,0.18391822026796864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25986040937649524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557771820481992,0.0,0.14221158930996455,0.0,0.15255248397744506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13946195857711524,0.07881491323208915,0.0,0.0857337225054306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160350594145302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513187169315552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745223207313871,0.0,0.2681716761572269,0.0,0.15709107647977846,0.08290533381009031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736995738715649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825055335566668,0.0,0.0,0.20139223988261806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15202520513199044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118562223861816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474834289701247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473115483789485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137492073822293,0.1317197679124834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15164979088545508,0.0,0.4813549328563974,0.0,0.0,0.09664084266288367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666105938853417,0.0,0.11976111072267864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241986557295607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447022947596438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10716225073403622,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,furretguy,2020/02/05,"Do I need to go on anxiety meds? What are the steps (UK)? My teachers are desperate for me to get onto it. I don't think I'm that serious of a case to be on it. I have tried therapy before but gave up on it as it didn't work after a few months. Nothing helps. 

The most worrying thing I suffer from is nightmares. For example, my dad often jokes about my 12yo cat hitting the bucket. I now have proper nightmares about my cat being killed or dying on me. When my friend was in a low mood I had nightmares about him dying too because I thought he was going to kill himself or something. 

I panic before every presentation and think I can't do it. Had 2 today before one. I could only do the presentation with the teacher only in the room. I also had an interview today which was less worrying and I was okay with it as the person was immediately nice to me. I often judge people based on the tone of their voice. I'm easily intimidated by male voices as they're a lot more serious. I'm male myself. 

One of the male teachers I had kept asking me to talk to him whilst I was upset. I couldnt say a word. My heart was going like mad. But i don't think it was serious enough to be a panic attack. I was also shaking a bit. But not really crying so that's why I think it was more of a panic moment and not an attack. 

I also find it hard to talk during group tasks. Even with just a classmate next to me. It seems to be the more people, the worse my fear is. I wanted to make an impression that I was confident and happy to be in the class, but now it's the complete opposite. 

Its weird. I find it okay to talk to new people but people I've already met and group tasks/presentations I find really difficult. 

Every one of my teachers at school think I need to get onto anxiety meds. I have tried therapy already but it didn't work, and I didn't like it either. I don't really like talking about my feelings. I find it so embarrassing. 

Also, my parents aren't supportive of my mental health. They think I need to toughen up and not panic. I don't know how I'm going to get onto help if they're only going to let me go to the doctors. The nearest CAHMS to me is on the bus and I haven't got any money, they know I haven't got any money.

It's gotten to the point where I find it easier to cope with it rather than talk to them. 

All my teachers are worried, I'm sick to death of panicking when anything human related comes up in life. But then I'm thinking it's not as serious as everyone thinks it is and I'm not going to get anywhere with treatment.",1.5232595627369143,3.343826322701692,3.950181108090515,86.11586169927635,79.39399624765478,6.752521346249568,21.571734885323735,7.745696148679241,0.946428219167592,1982,57,415,32,49,691,218,533,0.207,0.705,0.08900000000000001,-0.997,1,0,1,0,0,0,50.0,0,0,4,2,22,33,5,8,29,2,47,5,1,2,1,66,93,34,5,8,18,2,2,3,1,0,4,3,1,5,27,15,0,1,18,1,2,10,17,21,0,3,25,5,61,11,70,59,11,47,0,2,0,0,30,22,0,8,18,290,88,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14138407458478106,0.20491571470551814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712628224005355,0.0,0.098011774222898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05271609648474584,0.0,0.059887651059382735,0.14575547917382115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03905051086652109,0.0,0.16353156737085078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993716044267358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05518220066541739,0.06716591385820292,0.0,0.0,0.05114686693894915,0.0,0.07036713523668764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296877324363016,0.0,0.0,0.0655683418094772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619132373740044,0.0,0.04231116609455885,0.0,0.107946983607632,0.0612122781457745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720855486991069,0.03239076816095922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927493677216613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049492761157635186,0.0,0.13387526787196255,0.0,0.2548482646486431,0.0,0.10246960766493103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819328724724283,0.057385367562501614,0.0,0.0,0.06809301014332167,0.0,0.07591166007916947,0.08587642002114418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417462673225643,0.0,0.07041163478259985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655059073456786,0.04524762247224362,0.0938897518517611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054461701729777406,0.0,0.0,0.042760689183000335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14231290917168726,0.0,0.06455762693160233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05113225033208806,0.0,0.0,0.14249950727280913,0.0,0.061869752277395676,0.06812876258734292,0.0,0.0,0.061467501468587774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022657335024898,0.14616203448025716,0.0,0.30064342662148896,0.07113128480577226,0.0,0.0,0.17764514125739692,0.05593490651124907,0.0,0.0,0.06055760676645228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311583717126548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05094325205375055,0.0,0.06483235491528389,0.0,0.058318011395136024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04931668117007729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269476983316453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25744586066819103,0.0,0.0,0.14651687146276962,0.0,0.04255875860399227,0.32837757951521834,0.0,0.05085665301511296,0.0,0.0,0.12144318189798615,0.0,0.0,0.08698535833322035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03778437299014748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780437772220433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093273195096508,0.19516876561116253,0.06528282920730978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saaraa17,2020/02/05,"I feel like a failure, and I’ve been feeling like that since 4 years since I started university. I’m so disappointed in myself. My grades are as best mediocre. I’m not sure if I’ll ever get to study my dream subject. I’ve retaken so many exams throughout the years due to me not being happy with the grade I first got, but often I haven’t even gotten any better grade after I’ve retaken it. The reason to this is mostly due to me having too much, and me retaking exams hurt the courses I have going on meanwhile. And don’t tell me I put too much pressure on myself. It’s not too much pressure to require good grades from myself. I wish I would have understood earlier, how to study and what the studies require. If I would have the possibility to go back in time and retake all my studies, I would. 

I’m exhausted, but too disappointed in myself to care about whether I will get burned out or not. I’m a failure, who keeps on failing. It’s a bad circle. I don’t want to be mediocre or regular, I want to be an excellent student. I want to be someone my parents, and myself can be proud of. But I’m not. I’m tired and I’m fucking disappointed. I know I could do better, but I’m not sure if I have any resources left.",2.3633333333333333,3.9463597777777792,4.401904761904763,84.87642857142859,76.22222222222223,6.863492063492062,26.285714285714285,7.62386473244151,1.4391380952380963,952,36,196,13,21,327,123,252,0.175,0.6629999999999999,0.162,-0.8287,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,11,12,22,1,2,10,0,23,3,0,2,4,48,49,21,0,11,16,1,2,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,7,9,0,3,5,1,0,3,9,10,0,1,4,2,30,12,24,35,6,21,0,5,0,1,3,8,1,7,12,135,37,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18301506188984532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034707275167952,0.11235457832975072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121568480663188,0.23802027590775135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719606147378882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743769592409168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887766678821224,0.12172003924514775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360783058160233,0.19226382908031872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445931484993806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12440142929278115,0.14060734490885465,0.0,0.1529506358161295,0.1128651545590264,0.107622413733638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14324493557110232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440525951563814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11960587729503665,0.0,0.0,0.07395236756457506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14620321558410573,0.0,0.0,0.1314814795580541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642587567738929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967581124097647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941641208980644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15169969099582814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352730947606072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835329122444934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226239945862977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11401488864609635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524446370244936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25364828230392256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761409153603394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846483309452726,0.1546605029190558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23810643069360204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474093861678684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867693231952008,0.0,0.0,0.17330846540006936
mentalhealth,Rain_593,2020/02/05,"First place I am admitting this I was diagnosed and treated for clinical depression in 2010. I was declared okay in 2015. 

But since October 2019... I haven't felt anything close to what I would call truely happy. It feels like I'm back where I was a decade ago... I feel stressed, anxious, and on edge all the time. I hate it. 

It's been slowly eating away at my work life, and my relationship with my fianceé. I just feel.... like the same lost 19 year old kid again. 

I've been debating going to a therapist again but I honestly doubt I can afford to with the wedding coming up. 

Part of me just thinks I needed to admit that I feel like this again. I don't know anymore. 

Thanks for reading. I hope you all are well.",1.2529458041958037,3.6268961608391614,2.666254370629371,91.86553540209793,83.89510489510491,6.092482517482518,21.524912587412587,7.413659706084162,0.794315034965035,553,18,117,9,16,179,98,143,0.11,0.728,0.161,0.8096,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,3,8,15,1,2,5,1,11,4,0,0,2,27,28,5,0,3,4,0,5,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,7,7,1,0,9,1,0,2,2,5,1,1,7,5,20,10,15,20,4,20,0,2,0,0,7,9,0,2,12,76,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385116049601208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17652491680549556,0.1549640642284444,0.0,0.0,0.1285854566622361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468077498657718,0.12015129601530868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15955494888308105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346007945456103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458315022191716,0.1585966526368757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988899998253125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31603111712360993,0.3348881678219052,0.15003036051431992,0.0,0.0,0.13291135908957488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880394272230514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16633752433705135,0.0,0.15427054924340255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15519756465794632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587426627344333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036830468199553,0.2290165134145732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17057199177323346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586191845672746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639644921569326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921012957636142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16325436739523033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562983854173626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16776057450640666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292566608720662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17899083495651438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14385962348476738,0.0,0.18142537588325836,0.0,0.10012259972583136,0.0,0.0,0.09111418866173578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14049299977068674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375630201774173,0.0,0.0,0.11099985044479854,0.0,0.0,0.10062380553409477
mentalhealth,throwAway_Randinom,2020/02/05,"I don't know who to trust and I feel alone and hopeless. I want to give up. I don't know where to begin exactly.  

I am experiencing a major depressive episode.  

I have had a few of these in recent weeks, with periods of 'I am going to beat this mentality'.  

These ups and downs make me think I am bipolar.  If not for outside triggers.

My support structure is small.  Two people I consider very close.  I have no one else.

There has been a cycle where their behavior makes me question the genuine aspects of the friendship. 


I spend a lot of time online trying to find information, why I do what I do, and to prevent people from taking advantage or feeling judged. I am also consider empathic.  With a mix or hit  of Asperger's? 

 I sense or see things that make me doubt the friendships I trust the most.  I ask and ask for truth but they keep holding back.

So, I finally broke down and snooped.

I found out nearly everything I do is misunderstood or annoying to them.  That the friendship is more illusion than true.  There is more but I don't feel the need to elaborate much further.  

I'm at the point where nothing I do is good enough.  I'm seen in a negative light, misunderstood, and seen as a charity case by those I cherish.

I have plans to see a therapist soon.  Part of my 'beat this mentality' but I'm afraid they'll try and out me into a psych ward if I'm open and honest or put me on medication that makes you worse.

There are days I felt unstoppable and others where I'm crushed.  All of it is based on situations and people in my life it how I'm behaving or precieving.

I no longer want to try living anymore.  I'm middle aged.  I am completely alone.  I'm hanging on by a thread.

Tl;Dr Lost friendships and hanging on by a thread.",1.8330579710144936,4.1710693999999995,3.6414130434782632,86.0244384057971,81.08695652173913,7.195652173913044,25.23550724637681,8.256446698504663,1.7774202898550726,1353,54,275,29,36,453,185,345,0.141,0.743,0.11599999999999999,-0.9128,0,2,0,0,0,2,38.0,0,1,4,5,12,16,1,2,18,0,26,3,0,6,4,61,63,27,0,5,12,0,4,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,14,19,0,3,11,0,1,4,7,7,0,2,7,10,40,9,43,54,10,40,0,4,4,0,11,26,0,12,10,190,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465141003969647,0.0,0.09517115891115467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802458300325695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225140092931999,0.0,0.0,0.09151029098335137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12477828497239835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675072141231909,0.0,0.10250195916900104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941644003008776,0.0,0.0,0.12296772844395586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695728348155048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18052301835402407,0.0,0.11426694844184825,0.13036813774963693,0.10877173236466478,0.0,0.0,0.13048682081079846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141639226757954,0.06763534733700753,0.09981879303884236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578033901241507,0.0,0.0,0.13080806208970638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405931531110371,0.0,0.0,0.10508680117772283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991197863391854,0.10117688196525564,0.0,0.0,0.31775674022730105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198886750079338,0.2398654170750765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748503681513747,0.08824339165275058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419199076157666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064332807650652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12887474965638754,0.0,0.24751679966612575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125016229259267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963654417866453,0.13331690270037502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175066654302784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18966894101152607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377068708440829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350495837128807,0.0,0.0,0.08947967942033369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13817819274063878,0.07906404609295585,0.07625592514418708,0.0,0.0,0.06939488955728843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24239714478037686,0.0,0.11625413948656528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09819458385456932,0.1403887474953849,0.0,0.09546154499440324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073867785272824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127996179477665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rvi857,2020/02/05,"I think I may have a mental health issue. Can y'all help me identify it based on these symptoms?  \- Being afraid to let go and enjoy yourself completely because you don't want to risk being vulnerable or stupid

\- When you finally muster up the courage to feel something, you can't because you forgot how to feel things

\- Not really knowing what to care about or prioritize (because you haven't let yourself care about stuff for a while) so you opt for the least-effort thing as opposed to the ""most beneficial"" thing, whatever the f that means

\- Finding ways to rationalize your inability to feel things normally (""it doesn't matter anyway"", ""why care about X when <insert excuse here>"", Nihilism!!!!)

\- Ghosting people because you're afraid you're not going to be able to be a good enough friend for them (or more likely because they're not going to accept your sometimes apathetic, sometimes violently bitter self)

\- Second guessing every single thing you do because you've suppressed your instinct and your belief in things for so long

\- Having to come up with more and more bullshit excuses to explain your irrational behavior because nobody will understand ""I decided to charge that 200 dollar watch to my credit card because I wanted it for the 2 seconds before I bought it and it felt like too much effort to cancel the purchase""

\- Not being able to enjoy basic human emotions like gratitude, relief, hope, bliss, fascination, or excitement because you've been trained to think that any time you do experience those, you're faking it, so you don't know what's real anymore

\- Major trust issues with people, places, institutions, ideas, etc. (seeing red flags everywhere!)

\- Putting your own acceptable behavior in a smaller and smaller box because you don't want to be a hypocrite about the things you find fault with in other people",12.459131054131054,9.761744561728399,10.919506172839508,61.16585470085472,55.54320987654321,13.179107312440648,44.36752136752136,11.20814326018867,5.1162125356125365,1474,63,223,26,13,461,186,324,0.098,0.72,0.182,0.9865,0,0,1,0,0,0,65.0,0,18,1,1,12,26,3,3,12,0,22,2,0,1,0,49,48,17,1,5,8,0,4,3,1,2,2,0,0,2,22,9,0,3,18,0,4,5,10,8,0,2,4,8,26,18,38,34,10,19,1,0,3,0,26,7,0,8,9,153,48,1,0.16951611758999646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576383864582799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840572191548401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5166772594557152,0.0,0.07212286530853615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592494693100097,0.0,0.0,0.07301156266046875,0.08886721205700464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534140802154507,0.0,0.08757773199250554,0.09452764033742254,0.0,0.0,0.07141232011988664,0.0,0.0,0.0829096452978623,0.0,0.0,0.12856866366440528,0.0,0.08138102828176227,0.09284831046873694,0.15493466043385104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548386597356018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450987419028674,0.07109103839838231,0.0,0.0,0.09337055747073204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009385303356963,0.0,0.0,0.05681154018708685,0.0,0.0,0.08418387688592838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568153159317833,0.0,0.1769307850939506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316162499799688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17334171530412262,0.0,0.12422551869695113,0.0,0.0,0.07500821485300803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232637370412708,0.0,0.0,0.08541618795717516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062306925601561626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304490177925716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762816978007543,0.0,0.08855413160754459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520525942189691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647322680926104,0.054298182818209806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754119919674842,0.0,0.08842114036894651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06525089456448595,0.16765577481240967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970276991323715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809607636909189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3941664165561509,0.10861908339084124,0.0,0.0,0.04942310568961679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08823612835908151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997749724861262,0.06727700190857246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648096478977569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fantasy_Noob1234,2020/02/05,"I believe I am suffering from mental health issues Hello,

  


My location is Austria and I am a male in the mid 30s.

This looks like the right place and I know I should speak with a qualified professional but before I do I wanted to get this off my chest and possibly narrow down what it is I think I have.

I thought ADHD, possibly depression and now maybe even borderline bi polar? Honestly I really don't know but here is what my symptoms are like and why it's mentally exhausting me to the point I feel I need help.

  


My mind is going 100km/minute. At the end of the day I am exhausted. Mentally not physically. My family is the mian thing that keeps me from hitting a depressive state but this is starting to affect my work and my life and I would really like to know what it is.

  


Symptoms:

  


 *  Depression - i hit a financial burden past year and I believe that had partly to do with this. Just increased stress. Ive had mild depression phase during my late teens but it went away and I was happy until about 2 years ago (when the financial debt stuff started). It has gotten to the point where sometimes I feel I really am not happy and have no purpose. It can cripple my basic social skills and keep me isolated in my own comfort zone and away from people including my peers Co workers and sometimes family.
 *  Memory loss/forgetfulness - this is one of the main ones that I'm posting here. My memory has gotten so bad lately i can barely remember some of my work tasks that I've done a few months ago. I can read articles o topics I like and 1 to 2 weeks later I don't remember what it's about.
 *  Fatigue - I haven't been eating properly. I have gone a little bit healthier with my diet but there are some days I don't eat until late evening. Or I have one small meal for the whole day. There is no habit to my eating some days ill eat a few meals some i won't. I self diagnose myself to this and maybe a vitamin deficiency but again it's just me thinking what it is.
 *  Anxiety - I get anxiety in social settings sometimes, at work I'll have anxiety and sometimes at home. Sometimes I'll have anxiety just doing things I normally do.
 *  Loss of focus - this is a big one. I will try something and be excited to try it and get bored of it quickly and move to something else. I just can't focus. For instance I wanted to learn programming and it would benefit my job tremendously. I start it and stop within 2 weeks and say I'll get to it tomorrow. Tomorrow was 4 months ago. This happens with many things. I know I should do it but I can't motivate myself anymore and the original motivation I had is completely lost. Sometimes it takes me convincing myself a lot to do regular routine things like calling a friend to see how they are.
 *  Constant mood swings - I don't know how I'll feel when I wake up. It's 50/50 I'll be unmotivated, unhappy and groggy or I'm upbeat and energetic and social. I prefer the latter as I generally feel better but I never know which form will take when I wake up.

  


I've always been a bit of an introvert so always assumed it could be that but it's really taxing me. I used to drink what I kept saying was not much, just a few beers a day, but it was a bit of an addiction. I didn't completely stop alcohol but cut down enough to where I have a beer or 2 a month now which I think is fine. I don't crave them.

  


Weed is my biggest positive. When I smoke I am relaxed and chill and just overall more happy.

So my questions are this:

  


 *  Any suggestions on what I may be dealing with?
 *  For those that are diagnosed with possible similar symptoms, has medication helped you? I've heard of some negative feedback from anti anxietyndrugs or anti depressants which for me was a last resort but at this point I'll try anything.
 *  Any recommendations on where to go, what tests to do?
 *  Will diagnose do anything to my career? I would think I don't need to disclose anything medical related to my employer but I'd like to be anonymous on this if possible.

  


Thanks for reading my rant.",1.8422810053080736,4.287450428751576,3.8386974691339937,83.96453261092702,81.91298865069356,7.622798322531453,24.101131998005805,8.569652575389874,1.972225032992171,3142,118,613,78,86,1064,334,793,0.136,0.7509999999999999,0.113,-0.9429,3,0,8,0,0,0,79.0,0,1,2,10,30,36,1,1,32,0,83,31,3,7,1,115,131,58,0,13,27,0,4,6,1,10,17,4,1,2,54,34,11,5,23,6,2,6,18,16,0,4,20,10,92,19,69,93,21,83,0,9,2,1,20,32,0,14,48,431,146,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055049084439773834,0.060687471588057824,0.0,0.1342873890728524,0.05396583863627902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403494703132611,0.0,0.0,0.06867925947314643,0.0,0.15451998869253525,0.0,0.05007936480929275,0.0,0.0,0.12466396048824645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09488701653463584,0.0,0.04216280976234259,0.0,0.0,0.04296915029064093,0.11378544847196145,0.0,0.044660412427632495,0.16538863814790372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05156298998756638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589009669685832,0.054569219279427976,0.0,0.040317672870055235,0.0,0.0,0.16283164401766442,0.05206009587289652,0.21746456866320715,0.1537598990671718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051675870065020765,0.0,0.0494677464514076,0.0,0.20668377791935674,0.04218368785230573,0.0,0.044725273102258,0.0521768056773814,0.0,0.06670546430095939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952079834012542,0.0,0.10213101782223734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039013786634695284,0.0,0.10553020308938006,0.0,0.057397114179166514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04465424986501186,0.16126469586787173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053675852930987006,0.0,0.0,0.06769402735453436,0.0,0.05065251699886997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052705653492965486,0.05011039038713345,0.08976794583391516,0.0,0.0,0.16651068348717446,0.04116172057219413,0.17088813854642287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0356674602016426,0.1480214342563107,0.05061116883755835,0.0,0.0,0.04240468559315276,0.0,0.055123341303612315,0.0429306662499707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0511959399283656,0.10146186468393296,0.0,0.0,0.10174064655766456,0.1526670218335501,0.0,0.0509874830449926,0.0,0.12091845299886846,0.05367022276368216,0.0371210383679032,0.07488563636722098,0.03894632926078049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0494762493164852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687204964977184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05468323156515967,0.048205013490158495,0.03500819855065415,0.0,0.05275852219159443,0.0,0.14320770316103135,0.2277107104150688,0.04836208019241054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656809484675601,0.0,0.10102114837257607,0.0,0.12939845182485912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11440630823838555,0.04312408438032321,0.0,0.08031433767747742,0.0,0.0,0.04023949862058114,0.0,0.05267928905943567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15442571851639408,0.0,0.07774997521648158,0.2996564052547,0.0,0.10722591630089452,0.0,0.0,0.08443535406110862,0.05784403865462026,0.0,0.057806879531733114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745687013371884,0.07593478230862799,0.0,0.0,0.04649076933862944,0.0,0.0,0.13419161014883174,0.12942552125976947,0.0,0.040088905190941486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028522595318338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043613116187755145,0.0,0.0,0.05956877052255336,0.0,0.08101114895532414,0.0,0.0,0.046811140555034915,0.04556560608576008,0.05637799555612106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028705351398928,0.0,0.0,0.10761466599134906,0.0,0.0,0.06503670758676833
mentalhealth,Hacibay,2020/02/05,At first sorry for my broken english. I have problem like: i think so much thinks especially my problems but i doesnt do anything. For exp: When j have a exam i get depressed and start thinking bad thinks but doesnt study for exam and i know it but somehow how i dont do it. Whan can i do? I dont use drugs nor im alcholic,-0.8347104851330158,1.2352112253521137,1.779624413145541,96.35453834115809,91.67605633802816,3.718935837245697,20.56494522691706,5.033348758259628,-0.31062566510172074,251,9,58,1,9,86,45,71,0.242,0.731,0.026000000000000002,-0.9259,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,1,0,10,1,0,2,0,15,18,9,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,0,0,10,1,4,18,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,39,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16480981714028853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672218243308804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249714667578195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4694432024921293,0.0,0.2322562013847643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17035438809351222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463577488125386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21633209806496967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110066274125845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978445792075002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14722566621927358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38327354911952455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22419222299572253,0.14175615461788932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5133142668153934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17297388136083894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dream1ng-1n-c0l0ur,2020/02/05,"I don't think I can take it anymore I'm a 20 y/o person, I'm studying at uni, I'm trying really hard. But I've been fighting depression, anxiety and disordered eating for years and it's only getting harder. 
I'm retaking a 1st year exam for the 3rd time tomorrow and I feel like I know nothing. My depression makes it impossible for me to learn new stuff. I feel so stupid. I spend so much time on this and u still don't understand anything. Everytime I think if this I start crying again. I'm such a disappointment for everyone.
There is no joy in this anymore. I don't know what to do with my life.
I'm so close to relapsing in my SH behaviours. I cannot take this anymore. Life is way to hard and I'm not strong enough for this.",0.4032323232323236,2.656750766233767,2.9947186147186184,88.83033189033189,86.79220779220779,7.058585858585857,22.191919191919194,8.167268648758528,1.4289953823953818,574,21,125,14,18,199,89,154,0.204,0.754,0.042,-0.9696,0,0,0,0,2,1,17.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,2,0,4,0,9,3,0,1,0,19,28,10,0,1,3,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,10,7,1,0,8,0,1,0,6,5,0,0,1,4,14,3,14,27,2,15,0,3,0,0,2,5,0,1,10,69,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635739267765075,0.0,0.4525320794132602,0.0,0.0,0.1251667483369659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707658750704993,0.0,0.0,0.2620099618026249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17432173840511514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15563802269825533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15716172692580166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533970314022682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15381439056349494,0.1086614928075881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946686628780752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.272506514665719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671822452441685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148678734764883,0.07430921309363976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152907325436288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118122587122585,0.0,0.0,0.14690078039477095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14594569401486482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568020526395315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280934730383767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744025092329414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765837398612088,0.0,0.1214686229693922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17412006920418474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22872311492484065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19492126976139434,0.0,0.0,0.17738346183436868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032670776244358,0.0,0.0,0.1583432454193567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073125852638565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19589703020734767
mentalhealth,Thrxwayccount7,2020/02/05,"I’m so messed up in the head I’m a 18 almost 19 yo male. And I’ve had a lot of issues. Like so many. I’m not gonna lie, I’ve been through a lot. And I desperately want help. I want to get better and become a normal human being. But I can’t financially afford it. I’m trying to handle all of my issues on my own for now. But I just feel to fucked up and sick to be able to handle it all. I’ve done some sick and bad things in the past. And I’m still struggling with some problems. There’s things that I’m trying to stop. Things that I feel guilty and horrible for. I’m getting better and I feel good about that But I just can’t move on from these things. I’m filled with remorse and guilt. And at times I feel like I just don’t belong here. I’ve thought of just committing suicide over everything because I just don’t think I can handle it all. I just want it all to end.",-0.6087441424554818,1.3324904123711363,1.7171321462043103,98.45774133083414,88.17525773195877,4.558200562324274,15.51921274601687,5.852544927426893,-0.8476618556701032,676,13,167,5,22,228,96,194,0.212,0.68,0.10800000000000001,-0.9747,1,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,0,2,13,11,1,2,6,0,10,4,1,0,5,44,31,15,1,5,10,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,12,12,0,1,6,0,0,2,5,6,0,0,4,4,14,5,25,24,9,16,0,0,0,1,3,8,1,5,8,102,26,0,0.14285064324957158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14304428448178072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927432023803752,0.08708042623320472,0.1577673122641068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526795706397109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461858047283054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652326960185056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838494709006498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28891830963424475,0.10205252808040208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206311781963034,0.14926713031006156,0.0,0.0,0.11981634205487725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466059723856357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574977500786226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981979155805545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957921725407554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428930170068825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482813096002586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182762660375812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996330032117776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636710286892015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366887731890668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408070822680633,0.11942953418502444,0.0,0.14933850852436148,0.0,0.15625541811742727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37961447949906185,0.09153292413815983,0.0,0.11340745416846748,0.08329735885326757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939724196079304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527710315634254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,guccipoofmittens,2020/02/05,What to name a banking app that helps those who suffer from mental illnesses What are some witty names I could call the app? I want to avoid cliches. Currently in the midst of designing an app to help those who suffer from mental illnesses with financial management!,5.7650000000000015,8.192918833333334,5.560833333333335,76.56750000000002,69.0,9.8,28.66666666666667,10.125756701596842,3.327441666666667,216,8,35,6,4,67,35,48,0.267,0.622,0.111,-0.8832,1,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,8,2,1,2,0,2,0,0,7,1,0,1,1,24,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635832408523012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842897622743044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4773271266433703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7176616481821021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21001697773344333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cloudfloof89,2020/02/05,Panic attacks What are some ways of dealing with random panic attacks (i.e what can i do at the time to calm down)?,0.8337681159420285,3.3480981739130438,2.27826086956522,92.38376811594203,89.0,3.066666666666667,20.71014492753623,3.1291,-0.3183507246376811,90,3,17,0,3,29,20,23,0.391,0.536,0.073,-0.8779,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,1,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6380532095282928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28910829368986113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6580421688664667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351944821798778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225901848204064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwdatassout,2020/02/05,"Career continues to cripple me Hi everyone. 

28, female. Really struggling with my anxiety as of late. 

I work in an industry that is very for lack of a better word unstable. It is not uncommon to get laid off, it is not uncommon to go through restructures, or for companies to get purchased out. 

Since I got to my current role almost 2 years ago, I’ve had three different managers, and attempt at a hostile takeover of our company, and now, and acquisition by another company. 

I like the work that I do, however I don’t feel that I’m being properly utilized. My skill set isn’t being maximized, and my role has changed drastically.  

Since finding out about the merger and seeing a lot of layoffs around me naturally I begin to apply for different positions. I came across a company that would be a huge opportunity in a step up in the right direction. I went through the interview process,  

This job would be everything that anyone would want. A brand that anyone would wanna work for, more money, better benefits, and just a step in the right direction. But I’m having second thoughts and I’m hesitating for some reason. 

I haven’t been sleeping well, and it’s keeping me up at night. The kicker? I don’t even have an offer yet.  They want to speak with me tomorrow, but that could mean yes or no. 

I’m anxious because I feel like I finally just got good at my job in my current role, and I’m feeling more confident in my role.  I like my coworkers, and one of them I considered to be one of my good friends. However at the same time, there has not been any reassurance of me not losing my job or not getting laid off. 

My chest feels very heavy. I’m struggling to call myself down. My career is a huge trigger. 

Any advice anyone has for maintaining my anxiety would be helpful.",3.7472534785238953,5.7598985730994166,5.2946904617866535,78.10710526315792,73.50292397660819,9.278644888082273,30.79895140149224,9.753983421225431,3.301602218189151,1400,65,258,39,29,472,172,342,0.07,0.78,0.15,0.9803,10,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,1,0,2,9,9,16,1,2,18,1,29,2,2,2,0,54,54,16,0,10,12,0,4,3,1,5,0,1,0,0,11,16,0,1,9,0,2,5,10,4,1,4,8,6,36,12,49,34,6,42,0,1,1,0,15,23,0,6,16,181,47,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718420244864566,0.0881589766937595,0.0,0.09958769249692953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352627363680376,0.1042850152103202,0.1521623606198226,0.11235344526550016,0.0,0.20861929641941665,0.0,0.0,0.08853414764883104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060625552021398674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591597925276614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155250907681963,0.11374759916040585,0.0,0.0,0.10520795912448602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07940503142040099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20781418242167204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06568768869425648,0.0,0.0,0.0950314879556807,0.08938183499158568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20114545562463607,0.07104915671272287,0.0,0.10894576785421403,0.09089812977200763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683704770216701,0.0,0.15588007371707538,0.0,0.056521363094620684,0.1668327129866951,0.159083105246352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666116849532493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29607491007752496,0.08839828854285163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218717950634167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14576295953262774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126233267052506,0.0,0.08455128135655716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833334096884907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933297899283954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478368950067734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371206099878568,0.10225412358577783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16986443072902965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925106844848631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16453689864635468,0.0,0.09952470279677783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20793948557613928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895447702440332,0.057991773591919864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16411808163902158,0.11731976967676422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942008213670134,0.09219381531710566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21720864142548327,0.0,0.0,0.3532423594106497,0.0,0.0,0.06404439346054568
mentalhealth,Ej003,2020/02/05,"Mental Health Survey I'm 16 and I'm doing a project on mental health for my baccalaureate lessons in school. I need to gain some data on people's thoughts on mental health and the way the lives of teenagers has changed. It will only take a couple of minutes and any responses are appreciated. Thank you

Survey: https://forms.office.com/Pages/ResponsePage.aspx?id=Ug4_TzS3ZEGUCRtgHRR5kyTiw1EYKDZFgJ18kt8HlQJUMU1TQk5EMDFQNURBMFhGVTE3TE5YQVg0OC4u",13.6355,18.773516883333336,7.583333333333332,58.50500000000002,55.16666666666666,6.666666666666668,26.66666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.7961666666666667,383,10,45,4,6,98,45,60,0.0,0.847,0.153,0.8481,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,0,4,3,0,0,0,7,10,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,8,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,24,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280554920881293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19920426481121192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20835856091416166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.600485894552937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16627888772525048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5693087187164104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396275540665475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14321626623450692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305486438529758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19057714614826712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158373269790953,0.0,0.0,0.1733681577490417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949504467233266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494696523444866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cupofdee,2020/02/05,"What adds purpose to your life? I’ve been struggling with finding meaning and what we’re doing here 🌍 I’m an over thinker and lately it feels like I’m living for nothing. 
I need to find a meaning or a purpose even if I have to create one. I have a full time job, I’m close to family and friends, I work out, I read, I travel and it still feels like it’s not enough. 
So what suggestions do you have? What adds purpose to your life?",-0.09763833992094816,2.071913445652175,1.6522529644268786,98.11330039525691,88.45652173913044,4.21501976284585,20.3201581027668,5.565023196281405,-0.242034782608696,335,11,77,2,11,109,57,92,0.033,0.84,0.127,0.787,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,3,0,1,4,4,0,1,4,0,6,2,0,0,0,20,14,7,0,2,3,0,2,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,7,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,2,9,3,9,13,2,8,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,5,49,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20398055266503315,0.0,0.13038952171602364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861035456289914,0.0,0.19963603740362068,0.282063983259279,0.0,0.0,0.36086407975226703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252090763292234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19590208700451506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22269062847663584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788774877892933,0.19289218375795145,0.0,0.17431942553774946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4300815813622084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463793470542049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18942323876530603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377225746908494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19746656975617824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576543941671935,0.0,0.0,0.20637908418689327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511319354391468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14371912216244773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRA_IDontWanna,2020/02/05,"Am I (39F) depressed or lazy or? How do I get out of this funk? How do I restore my integrity with friends (40F, 45M) I have borrowed money from? I posted this yesterday in r/relationship_advice and people over there suggested I post here. Leaving it in it's original form except where noted.

 

Relationship\_advice.....I can't seem to get anything done. I work at home, have my own business, sit at my computer all day long and the week ends I've got nothing to show for it. I have a sales page to write and emails to plan and days go by and I promise myself tomorrow or next week I will start fresh.

Yes, sometimes I screw around on Reddit but that's not all of it. I can't seem to save myself.

I've been having horrible headaches (daily, mostly constant, nausea, vomiting, sometimes dizzy) that started in the fall and it's taken a lot of wrangling to get a referral to a neurologist and get an MRI approved (13 days, 22 phone calls, one stupid clerical error to another). I finally had the MRI last week and I'm waiting for the results. I get them at the end of this week. It could be a spinal cord fluid leak or inconclusive. Brain cancer and tumors need to be ruled out but it's not likely based on my symptoms. Maybe a Chiari malformation.

Life doesn't feel hopeless. There are things I'm looking forward to, like the reservations my husband and I have on Valentine's Day at one of my favorite restaurants. Trips we have planned in the summer with my husband's family. Things I want to do in my business.

But the day to day seems overwhelming. I hate checking the snail mail. I only opened one Christmas card, and it was on accident. I haven't checked my work email in two weeks....and no, I don't have an assistant. I haven't even put an autoresponder on it. I'm not calling people back and if they manage to catch me, I avoid them or lie.

Two of my friends loaned me money over the course of the year to help me through this. I dread texting them and telling them I still don't have it, but another week goes by and I don't get anything done. Yes, my head hurts. And while it's nearly constant, it's not all the time. I have ok parts of the day most days.

Am I being too hard on myself? Do I just need to chill until after I see the doctor and find out what's the next step? One of my friends seems to think so.

Or how do I make myself get something done? Set a timer? Remove all the apps from my phone? I don't know.

What do I say to the friends I owe money to?

How do I get some sleep? I feel tired all day and then at night, I'm wired.

Is this what depression feels like? I can't seem to make sense of what I'm reading online.

I know that's convoluted and multiple questions. I don't even know if this is the right place for it. Thanks for the replies.

Random add: it feels out of integrity to going out to eat when we owe people money......we got a gift card from a neighbor for Christmas.  


Edit from my original post in the other sub to add that I'm getting out of bed, showering, taking my vitamins, etc.",1.6047696092851602,3.7384238368678666,2.9973695611478104,91.47162356590808,80.61500815660685,6.04251063033188,22.77348701628647,7.201597864021418,0.7455655283074369,2344,78,504,31,61,762,277,613,0.10400000000000001,0.7859999999999999,0.11,-0.6465,4,1,1,0,0,1,95.0,2,0,5,5,17,21,3,3,32,3,43,15,4,9,5,92,91,39,0,6,18,2,5,3,5,1,9,1,4,0,31,32,1,2,15,2,10,9,16,10,0,6,9,8,67,11,79,77,14,86,0,5,2,1,27,33,1,19,44,324,98,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810395456864993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838181917554486,0.058622592517291565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0506364264531286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351305082339188,0.1344853148037859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232608766792465,0.0,0.05257777845498197,0.0,0.0,0.3822241188866795,0.0,0.11343714157147634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740271605363855,0.0,0.20216958874367988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673834395198548,0.0,0.0,0.11665135079041895,0.0,0.07344282702891768,0.0869897708396121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207977670921915,0.0,0.1331877969680062,0.04704496370358558,0.0,0.07213807920457635,0.060187895447352285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035095861787654,0.0,0.30964642295967715,0.0,0.07485086659128365,0.0,0.10533635103410223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05899081063675625,0.06501560598773737,0.06758355505095615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044139471844562836,0.0,0.06605532084000325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049635017627974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857226128840664,0.053678490622361436,0.0,0.06972817731415949,0.0,0.0,0.04651349363784055,0.09651646068463078,0.0,0.0,0.05827729677302097,0.05529942593055462,0.0,0.0,0.05598535079866177,0.0,0.0,0.0879139692028349,0.0,0.06615758131892742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765743204143147,0.0,0.0,0.14006953700624758,0.0617980111628599,0.0,0.06318714845729095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849314682321188,0.05008371334915036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131172584543823,0.0,0.13696127602181665,0.0,0.06880173616027707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18920517160110206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619984490609428,0.07376975273496407,0.0,0.0658702149739662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070082699437487,0.0,0.05623758498984705,0.0,0.052368467133197816,0.0,0.0,0.05247583238326842,0.29974773300665186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589995219248139,0.0,0.0,0.05069639045125406,0.13025940376798278,0.0,0.0932213273663108,0.0,0.05258980721752537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844585219314017,0.0495128051427743,0.0,0.057557895250608185,0.0606280371976434,0.0,0.0,0.08749880941371058,0.042195555316083606,0.0,0.0,0.03839906073438134,0.07568764006219501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865644116581804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038841448382511516,0.0,0.2641140930854736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588265481493176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042406782925686566
mentalhealth,thehazeleye,2020/02/05,"How can I help a friend struggling with an eating disorder? So one of my friends has been dealing with anorexia for a few months, he lost a lot of weight and is now underweight
He's actually in a phase where he binge eats, and as a matter of fact he gained around 23 pounds in a month but still is underweight

If any of you have experienced an eating disorder, what would you have wanted people around you to do??
 Could you please give me tips on how to help him figure this out? 

I'm really concerned about his health, and I would be really grateful if someone could help me with this, idk much about eating disorders or how to help him",7.91,6.309681904761906,7.4904761904761905,78.76285714285716,63.28571428571429,11.257142857142858,32.111111111111114,10.125756701596842,2.7604063492063484,504,14,104,9,6,159,82,126,0.077,0.7240000000000001,0.2,0.9528,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,4,0,2,11,4,0,1,8,0,13,6,0,3,1,25,17,12,0,7,4,0,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,3,9,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,2,12,2,20,10,3,11,0,1,0,0,19,7,0,4,4,74,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.12247551285251038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534821745120794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22345346215176254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20041226638942364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939092288343645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43152140700891695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5136948813024317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939308705909933,0.0,0.0,0.12039655679292385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340674908191638,0.0,0.0,0.3364954492010412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700435783112613,0.1067005051171345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20035499313920774,0.0,0.0922611711000526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504594797697865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700988814955282,0.0,0.0,0.13776763076380374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608044013420952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634061927317487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022905838891004,0.0,0.0,0.13120586577042148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402654627992702,0.0,0.0,0.15283219863605366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783113754074959,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thefatkidfromup420,2020/02/05,"So I did a thing :) So at my high school at lunchtime today, the boys in my 4th year class were mucking about on the football field, I was standing up on the hill next to it like I usually do. There were also 1st and 2nd year boys playing football on their side of the pitch, their ball rolled over to the 4th year side, the 4th years grabbed it and absolutely yote it over the tall fence between the field and the woods, the younger boys had no way of getting it back. I saw everything happen, so I went around the outside of the school, went through the trees and managed to get it. The other 4th years laughed when they saw me getting the ball back and started saying stuff like, ""Leave the midgets to do it themselves."" I didn't care in the moment and I really still don't, they're morons, their words have literally no meaning. I gave the ball back to the younger boys and they gave me the nickname ""The BFG"", as in the Big Friendly Giant, (not The Big F**king Gun from Doom), since I'm a pretty big guy and seemingly the only 4th year that's been nice to them. I hope this shows some of you that there are always people who appreciate you, regardless of what ""group"" you might belong to or who you are. I'll wear this title with pride.",6.528623481781378,5.685273441295546,5.960890688259107,86.16700404858301,65.59919028340082,8.895546558704453,31.14574898785425,7.61054688173877,1.7369012145748988,968,30,209,8,13,296,136,247,0.040999999999999995,0.833,0.125,0.9666,0,0,0,1,0,0,34.0,0,4,6,1,13,11,1,0,26,0,14,1,1,0,0,20,30,15,0,2,2,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,5,16,10,0,1,2,5,0,2,5,2,0,0,13,4,23,9,30,16,1,40,1,1,2,0,22,20,0,5,18,133,39,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834877245074802,0.11273589977313307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061200741628553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125430374525397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13813785730714084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176683043978773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467679210126347,0.0,0.21235883674837944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415326718046708,0.1198105601316038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431492791959777,0.0,0.1345689972339853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346099478385935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13238404708281054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475848818943064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373012040011773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14409178535741207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304384276626888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939295115298464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783881889336658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679633540012778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774456868971956,0.0,0.27423981924498314,0.0,0.123342125429711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207610942673812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589827867425854,0.0,0.10819996089852643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15510001034825907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001143242521846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842567686982148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14921960656094194,0.0,0.0,0.1075431426853046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251195305586911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5234944751266378
mentalhealth,_nipnop_,2020/02/05,"is it normal to have a copay for an intake? i went to a mental health office today for an intake. there was a $50 copay because that’s what my insurance charges for a speciality visit. i thought i was seeing a psychologist for a first appointment before i could get into my psychiatrist, but i don’t believe the person i spoke to was a mental health professional. she basically just asked me for background information that she input into a computer. i could’ve done this myself on paper or online if they had let me. it was basic stuff like rate how often x happens on y scale, what mental health disorders run in your family, what have you been diagnosed with, etc. and i paid $50! is this normal?",5.38114379084967,6.279428617647064,7.048921568627452,71.43986928104576,67.97058823529412,9.573856209150328,27.61111111111111,9.725611199111238,2.647901307189542,556,17,97,12,9,193,90,136,0.013000000000000001,0.953,0.034,0.5191,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,1,4,2,0,0,11,0,14,4,0,1,0,15,22,5,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,10,4,0,0,2,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,11,2,18,2,14,9,1,10,0,0,1,0,10,5,0,3,3,77,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319940670666936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337500951796056,0.0,0.13034197095768188,0.17257752969075507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24459803886113446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15547098451726962,0.0,0.0,0.17555360887256324,0.0,0.0,0.15675280310802278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17083235529884416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14440122882914738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029190406998511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800284307066587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354535265341322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4884585627039977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15663341109141027,0.0,0.07483433018980265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4630978362715852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.300161013559021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337478642911135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206188684391675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17535051454625786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160507901086115,0.0,0.0,0.14519346884316575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199620614907238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lil_Flamethrower,2020/02/05,"Leaving my life behind So I moved to Arizona a few months ago and I was really happy to be back since I lived here most of my childhood. A little back story, I moved to Utah when I was 4th grade. Utah wasn't so bad, I made friends and new memories. But where there is light there is shadow. You... See my dad got his second DUI in Utah and got arrested. He won his first court case but lost the second because no one in my family was diagnosed with any terminal disease or illness. Since he was my family's provider. After the court case my dad's lawyer recommended that we should should sign up for this thing that would allow him to stay one more year before being deported. It expires in the summer of 2020 and he wanted to move back to Arizona because that's where most of our family's at. I always wanted to move back to my home but not this way. I wanted to graduate at my school in Utah. I left my life behind Because of my dad's stupid mistake. I just wanted to share this because it's eating me upside because I don't really have anyone I can talk to besides my family.",3.6213181818181823,4.738273359090911,4.897954545454546,84.43693181818183,72.22727272727272,7.863636363636362,24.20454545454545,8.278499904357787,1.3668181818181817,849,23,172,13,16,282,120,220,0.086,0.838,0.076,-0.6575,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,2,1,0,3,13,8,1,0,5,0,15,5,0,2,0,25,25,11,0,8,6,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,0,9,6,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,4,0,5,10,2,30,4,27,10,4,30,0,1,1,0,15,11,0,3,13,118,39,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346892070040774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773708224983896,0.0,0.0,0.07170490432994793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372824717682858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243168530908144,0.08804056023558819,0.3213855881058382,0.0,0.08972428748840168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702249788336664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789458590518428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976093739859563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968982264340702,0.0,0.0,0.08146505537916117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866491316814988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224611018144134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057679978886539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164898780534548,0.11456420556794325,0.0,0.1489551192642665,0.0,0.1056816584035222,0.09310816382809788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11510356823425152,0.0,0.0,0.09977278363899483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416365358355198,0.4482771908909767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183757538844587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142901908099609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350990630901137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671401756537988,0.08402447612301413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17444719651510873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238828443548778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475114665626017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005169130693617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24877222172393496,0.0836958020841147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490373259315776,0.0,0.0,0.06790188087667763
mentalhealth,GucciDonger,2020/02/05,"You should be aware that what you lack in talent can be made up with confidence and determination. 
This is for the people who are fighting hard to secure a future that’s right for them but are having second thoughts or doubting themselves. Nothing worthwhile  can be easy to achieve or obtain.",8.553899371069187,8.928303509433963,7.107547169811323,75.57125786163523,61.07547169811321,8.576100628930817,34.647798742138356,7.793537801064563,2.6052817610062906,238,9,39,2,3,71,44,53,0.16399999999999998,0.654,0.183,0.2951,0,0,0,0,2,0,3.0,0,2,1,2,0,4,1,1,2,0,10,0,0,1,0,10,12,4,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,1,3,2,7,6,1,4,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,3,1,33,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4242375728665391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4481159241287364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4544159032318191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283229974805367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4044375098840025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3759722025958692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hippieoftheyear,2020/02/05,"Amare Global Honest Review- Does it work? \[this is a non-sponsored review and my personal opinion\]

Usually around this time of year when it gets cold and depressingly grey in upstate New York, I burrow into my blankets and forget all of my responsibilities. My friends and family never heard from me around this time and I end up destroying relationships that I used to love. 

But not this year. Last month my mom told me about Amare and even bought me my first box to get me started! Now I have purchased two additional boxes and I've decided to give one of those away. 

Mental health as a topic of discussion has come a long way but there are many that don't understand or have bad stigmas surrounding it. Sometimes people think it's not real or that people are 'searching for attention'.

We need to end that. So I decided to use the small platform I've built on YouTube to discuss a product that helped me drastically. To see my entire review and also enter the giveaway of the Amare FundaMentals Kit if you're genuinely interested in the product, click here: [https://youtu.be/JEwOKvxBH6Q](https://youtu.be/JEwOKvxBH6Q)",6.788860971524287,8.915853849246233,6.661386934673367,70.93315242881073,65.78391959798995,9.1257621440536,30.854606365159132,9.558583805096642,3.0398700837520938,912,35,148,19,15,288,134,199,0.054000000000000006,0.887,0.059000000000000004,-0.126,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,0,0,2,10,7,1,0,8,0,7,2,0,2,2,34,22,17,0,2,7,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,14,14,0,0,5,0,2,2,4,3,0,3,3,5,18,4,24,19,1,31,0,1,3,1,12,12,0,4,16,98,32,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941256073341855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658560560494341,0.0,0.0,0.14029271266291676,0.0,0.12467743577732568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128627477845366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861061654181574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067248195014175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26450952373722003,0.0,0.0,0.09862561684405964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14076726981559498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270130161891331,0.0,0.0,0.11536562446845937,0.0,0.15602891733742574,0.1432430423886631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872205254625546,0.0,0.0,0.10008723085079517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171716738165572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13214506227038478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347687219334134,0.0,0.0,0.15138883173245105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048121727225924,0.0,0.0,0.174883845304229,0.11918720742313872,0.0,0.0,0.11072019596707752,0.11516614980224585,0.14421589016739514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011842917734204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070418196074484,0.13038200472797126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16996085814223996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031569244070584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899011316508964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14768304275732952,0.0,0.10569071312391357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567935703151333,0.0,0.0,0.17414144282060082,0.0,0.0,0.1426833445588616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586566614062432,0.15544922245327766,0.0,0.25793212184850234,0.16445682704135048,0.0,0.0,0.1185246659181968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870802261571816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923166406371752
mentalhealth,dodgeorram,2020/02/05,"Years ago I was the most motivated person I knew now on my two days off work I can’t even drag myself out of my bed, it’s like working nights makes my body think it’s always bedtime This blows I wanna live life",3.336014492753627,3.6160063695652203,4.498695652173911,90.1194927536232,72.26086956521739,7.0028985507246375,21.85507246376812,6.42735559955562,0.18286376811594265,167,3,39,1,3,55,39,46,0.043,0.8240000000000001,0.133,0.5984,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,2,0,7,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,8,1,5,3,1,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,6,23,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664303937091685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500919577497199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33385702059561595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19383785472395285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19851860147436245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21229608073564468,0.14683958515609172,0.0,0.2654020669155931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20062770654247625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820574104642093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624394560385408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19258822155601324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2936057484045751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4376259497131969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19355230294734066
mentalhealth,MeetThePrincess,2020/02/05,"Forever tired Does anyone else have issues being tired all the time. It gets worse at night around 6pm and I don’t know if it my medication. I’m only on Latuda now so I thought getting off everything else would help but no dice. I’m just worried, I’m about to start working again and I don’t want to work a night shift half asleep and get in trouble for not doing my job.",1.0358544303797466,3.0849928860759515,2.6004905063291157,94.00681170886078,82.16455696202532,5.468987341772152,20.00158227848101,6.6274283507984215,0.09242911392405072,294,8,66,3,8,96,62,79,0.19,0.768,0.042,-0.8957,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,2,0,6,4,1,0,1,13,16,6,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,0,5,0,9,13,1,11,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,6,37,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13008523153320808,0.19062251183216725,0.0,0.16561725535214927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16280703273963887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108292482942511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16720298983801835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29159856008907536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470035639303573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941800194595869,0.18461845998740475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224408457460853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18741823143351255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3491765394713799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14149369358380792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13168182876029091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14769695230378896,0.10848286938270232,0.427656938150072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973267811580127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708822903327341,0.18893517469644952,0.18959318673258185,0.1321592438473805,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zuennedd,2020/02/05,"Maybe not as serious as most things ln this subreddit but Google isn't helping My arms and face are go completely numb when I'm crying, this only started yesterday and I won't go into detail on why I'm crying in the first place unless that seems relevant.
It's honestly scaring tf out of me so thanks in advance.",5.285,5.840042539682544,6.473134920634923,76.70589285714287,68.04761904761905,10.109523809523813,31.62301587301588,10.125756701596842,3.2204634920634927,252,10,47,6,4,85,53,63,0.233,0.634,0.132,-0.8316,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,2,5,0,1,1,0,3,3,2,0,0,9,10,8,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,3,0,1,0,0,3,2,9,9,1,13,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,2,4,29,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662707781862065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.557923231648803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160170699069528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28866106906827776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702231077742042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551355651601362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931469720613556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653327024552031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542568790813308,0.0,0.0,0.23119438692128294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17975321624837914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23381097414069266,0.0,0.0,0.16871882062153978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22915815112937665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lagtim3,2020/02/05,"A stranger on the internet is suicidal and I don't know how to help him and I don't know where else to ask. I don't know, I just started following this dude on tumblr recently for shitposts and now he's posted that he's seriously on the edge and considering killing himself. I messaged him to talk to him, I asked him to call a suicide prevention hotline, he just doesn't want to talk, he feels hopeless, I know I don't know him and his issues aren't my responsibility but I want to help him and I don't know how. What do I do, can I even do anything? Fuck.",1.4165177195685672,3.266269372881357,3.593636363636364,88.40444530046227,79.84745762711864,7.002773497688753,25.981510015408322,8.00094639256281,1.4654644067796614,438,18,99,8,11,150,60,118,0.172,0.779,0.049,-0.8845,0,0,0,0,0,2,11.0,0,0,0,0,7,4,2,0,4,0,12,1,0,2,0,21,26,9,3,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,7,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,0,1,21,0,11,26,0,9,0,1,0,1,20,4,1,0,3,65,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196927837811466,0.0,0.3225658640002352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17616223127075115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14411834102488955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394784740025755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723130672725042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15949198031048906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23127306824824545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006608077116426,0.0,0.0,0.1908678432819741,0.0,0.5688749535391886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16522649205650025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17034270867125434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211055946762857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3774178056863583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773301173471509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035135575310656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BeckyBbz8884,2020/02/05,"Is there anywhere in Texas does free, confidential councelling or therapy? Asking for someone I know, they are struggling with mental health but feel they have no access to mental health help. Even online places could help.",7.9047747747747765,10.72273767567568,5.484864864864863,77.70585585585587,64.13513513513513,7.095495495495496,28.54954954954956,7.793537801064563,2.038484684684684,182,6,26,2,3,51,33,37,0.105,0.69,0.20600000000000002,0.6757,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,6,7,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,2,4,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,0,16,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22120981469810144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18892357201878887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20706968117775376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562867310016421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964329366850948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5030366658095934,0.0,0.0,0.3172057448200312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004137253108225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4769190455217064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24721983580236595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004892216002452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24736889889763655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705981067306105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,runawayyyyyyy,2020/02/05,"First steps in seeking help? My partner and I are fairly convinced that he is depressed. We don’t have a family doc, and walk in clinics would be our only option for referrals if that is needed. There seem to be a few options for counselling as well. He is very open to getting help and tired of feeling this way - we’re just not sure where to start. BC, Canada if that is relevant at all!",2.498351648351644,4.460269641025644,3.5813553113553134,89.23269230769232,76.94871794871796,5.995604395604397,25.24542124542125,6.868970318607317,1.004111355311355,304,11,61,3,7,98,61,78,0.096,0.763,0.141,0.4272,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,0,10,2,0,0,2,17,15,6,0,4,4,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,1,4,3,10,12,2,10,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,5,2,43,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489370562131079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724673180278011,0.0,0.1461398693647154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458447615060645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100378339866075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3874551150202727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21430858811271788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198167547707957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26311776628896033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20457358577063287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27240291255973964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3321920501131136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23847613098326198,0.0,0.2294148198311827,0.0,0.0,0.25986844358892136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053152713713448,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rottenzebraflesh,2020/02/05,"I feel like im losing myself. I need help. Ive felt really odd for the past while, and its been getting worse. I dont feel like myself. I cant talk to people, cant crack jokes. I lost all of my friends. I broke up with my boyfriend yesterday, I have no idea why i did that. A couple of nights ago i was sitting and watching tv with him, and now the most important person ive ever met is gone. Nothing feels real. I feel like im watching a movie. Days feel unimportant, i dont remember when i felt happy last. I feel like nothing matters, considering dropping out of high school despite this being my last year. Ive begun self harming again. My boyfriend was the only person in my life that mattered, I dont know why I broke up with him. I had no solid reason, I just did it. I felt like i was doing something wrong, i felt like i wasn’t good for him. I cant have him back now. Its already done. Ive been having suicidal thoughts for a long while and they only are getting worse. I dont have access to professional help. I dont want to die. I want my boyfriend back. I love him. Please help me. I dont knwk whats going on",-0.0221428571428568,2.1377967436974785,2.1527310924369765,94.76800420168068,87.86554621848741,4.7445378151260496,19.42436974789916,6.1826913282559595,-0.06569075630252108,867,26,195,8,28,291,122,238,0.16399999999999998,0.64,0.196,0.8381,0,0,1,1,0,1,33.0,0,0,1,2,8,17,0,0,6,0,31,2,0,1,2,33,53,7,2,3,1,0,10,6,1,0,1,0,0,3,7,8,0,0,15,2,0,2,12,6,0,0,18,12,46,11,17,34,2,29,0,4,2,1,16,6,0,1,25,121,53,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136828865289642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888460709290022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238162301059034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08908407103571138,0.0,0.051923039917503286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355787661121516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239087311145459,0.566150903844706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282695671213156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24425318004944996,0.2300687650870801,0.3092133710808389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062202725182412474,0.0,0.08412751987748901,0.0,0.045756349582011434,0.06752894409460126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570563061566387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16189480731973438,0.08506446457848947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088730370815053,0.17393174467101102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04424682989575726,0.13125468782414915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05686741575872509,0.2360021261807915,0.0,0.0,0.07124984613475388,0.0,0.09007139796787947,0.08788744559328787,0.0,0.07266446839977847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05969800756174028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555427294331796,0.0,0.15450526550023616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122464735585885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685701556270468,0.05581630345107564,0.14059848496799462,0.0,0.0883770804443648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163933016874627,0.051577512926759626,0.08277888516525078,0.0,0.0,0.09120345350120423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148159572022391,0.0,0.0,0.08399070233430929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06198142706082853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806614534849898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471182349066698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06391687061307473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497514037700178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529760464737995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640955076795593,0.0,0.08802631840318824,0.0,0.05184654961422035
mentalhealth,oogaboogagottem,2020/02/05,"Is something wrong with me? 16yo boy. Created a throwaway account for this. 
Most days I feel empty with practically no emotion. Of course, there are bouts of some happy emotion throughout the day (like laughing with my friends about dumb stuff just like everyone else). But in the end, I just feel empty like I can’t hold onto those feelings. It feels like nothing matters or has any meaning. I stay up late wondering what it is I’m feeling. I’m usually zoned out throughout the day to a point where people wave their hand around my face practically every day. 
Other days, i feel really good like I could take on the world. It’s like the opposite of the bad days. I’m motivated and I feel alive. 
I’ve talked to my parents about it but their advice way “just sleep” or “too much ____”. 
For the past few months I’ve been ignoring these as things everyone deals with and told myself I shouldn’t complain about it and I’m just overreacting. However, I feel like it’s getting more intense and I’m worried. Is my empty feeling normal for people or is it something I should look at? 
Thanks for the help.",2.4657242942509825,5.078644696682467,3.2551246651555736,88.06471048835773,80.70616113744077,6.134020193694623,24.813723470018548,7.423996415210882,1.3069351329074794,865,33,166,13,23,273,123,211,0.109,0.71,0.18100000000000002,0.9062,2,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,1,11,17,1,0,10,0,11,3,3,1,0,40,32,10,0,4,9,1,10,7,1,2,0,0,0,1,14,10,0,2,12,0,1,0,3,5,0,0,2,11,18,12,24,27,5,23,0,0,1,0,10,10,1,6,18,99,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070444787950997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008113891665099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174106730124013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604687210485701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228127253780906,0.0,0.0,0.39877286337569096,0.10624549067274572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08608948061095466,0.2318466865793801,0.0912764086686184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682853622740848,0.19694751378552872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4689707119984284,0.14724545592356705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962027027620197,0.0,0.05384214156750587,0.0,0.0,0.08643789744760115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970428472064624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06907579626299884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11625086883143998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3524333034181949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654049809411847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225743499799314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225775842864279,0.0,0.07575750427561134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097231472855914,0.0988843411775744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443071651005242,0.0,0.09837794620379484,0.14289114033382252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974205703065945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601986500366433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10312972677650972,0.0,0.0,0.15867401179661528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984323942313563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797366441860092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774847613151297,0.08283194765636395,0.0,0.09487947567741016,0.0,0.0,0.06846536308364269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847375689276436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135008550261765,0.0,0.0,0.08180050147765995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175907839966752,0.0,0.10465766106643548,0.0,0.0,0.11267479426548553,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asiaeb,2020/02/05,"How do I mentally age faster? For some background information, I'm 17 years old, and when I was 14 and 15 I went through some severe depression and trauma and I don't think I ever really recovered from it because I still act like I'm 14 years old. This infuriates my mother, and I'm disappointed in myself because I'm very immature; not in terms of just being childish, but by the way I react to things and stuff like that, so I was wondering where I should start if I want to act my age because this is starting to affect me.",5.798442367601247,5.400077644859813,7.024813084112152,76.46126947040501,66.94392523364486,10.497819314641744,31.852024922118375,10.125756701596842,2.9854249221183795,416,15,84,9,6,142,70,107,0.11800000000000001,0.818,0.064,-0.5499,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,3,1,21,17,11,0,3,4,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,3,0,14,2,10,12,3,20,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,4,15,56,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3803108815827269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791153721011279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18811144114297365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20319719543848205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20957445000030672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4364374139799073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322429942492556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23493525085867603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943898710363195,0.0,0.1660768732004474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380640855882851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381591742301381,0.13325216920583022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715885195562746,0.1226600103564256,0.16506871835263473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927807116013163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22552340758868025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678384380325761
mentalhealth,morbidmagick,2020/02/05,"Reading with ADHD I’ve always loved to read. Ever since I was able to pick up a book I read, mostly Goosebumps books which turned me into the horror lover that I am today but, I digress. Since about my 10th year I have not been able to focus enough to read fluently. It takes me twice as long to read a paragraph because of my brain wondering off. So my question is, is there anything you guys have found that helps when you’re trying to focus? I miss reading dearly, I’ve only read for professional settings and not for my own enjoyment. I miss the feeling I had when I got really lost in a piece of fiction, I’m desperate here lol.",3.4262204724409457,4.972210559055117,4.50788188976378,85.3633976377953,73.33070866141733,6.969763779527558,25.298425196850395,7.554174236665415,1.2733218897637792,499,16,98,6,10,163,86,127,0.09300000000000001,0.74,0.16699999999999998,0.8959,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,1,7,7,0,0,5,1,8,4,2,1,1,13,19,6,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,4,9,0,0,2,3,0,1,6,1,16,4,17,13,4,11,0,3,0,2,6,4,0,3,6,65,20,10,0.2304182368531525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13845897182396832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958632157409626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480728801199573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023040926046448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861147810713994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904181667325947,0.0,0.0,0.10421324346334593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05825319192316231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632085180230904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921432565589948,0.0,0.0,0.11407514039410685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07722224357734503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195644438799063,0.0,0.0,0.12576436224279522,0.0,0.10398072744428263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762172608511694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906057948316013,0.0,0.8066820695514948,0.0,0.07380591136214391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19060434660128744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662291910508943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092047732197623,0.0,0.0,0.07821942888649405,0.12531443771694312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493937444166135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741908949873933
mentalhealth,rlpierce711,2020/02/05,"My mother is in psychosis and went missing. Police found her and let her go. Any advice from someone who has been through this before?? I live in Arizona. My mother lives in Washington state. We think she may be in Oregon currently.

Backstory: My mother has always suffered from mental health issues but has always been in denial and her religious beliefs have led to her refusal to accept and seek help. June 2019 she had a full psychotic break. She went missing for about 19 hours with no phone, money, food or water- on foot. We found her at 3am and she had walked 20 miles and claimed to be ""fasting and praying"" - acted like the whole thing was normal. 2 days later became convinced that my father was part of a secret government satanic cult and attacked him (no idea why the guy sticks around... he is a saint). She went to jail for the weekend, the state placed a restraining order and when she was released she was free to roam the streets since she could not return home. Dad was able to convince a police officer to give her cell phone to her- she went to a hotel that I booked for her, became paranoid, called 911 and they came and took her to the hospital for a mental eval. After determining she was not on drugs, they sent her to a psychiatric hospital where she stayed for about 3 weeks. Once out she was allowed to go off her meds by psych as they believed it was an isolated incident. 

​

Current Events: These past 2 weeks she started acting funny again - slightly. She was trying really hard to act normal and since my interactions are over the phone I did not pick up on it right away. Queue red flag - she bought a plane ticket last week to come visit me and my children (without talking to me or my father with whom she shares a bank account). Ok, rude, but the timing worked out and it's only for a week... that's fine. Her flight was scheduled for Monday 2/3. Saturday she becomes very clearly off her rocker, stays gone all day, exhibits paranoid behavior and is making elaborate stories. I try to talk her into going to the hospital but she isn't having it. Dad refuses to intervene because he doesn't want her to come unhinged and end up in jail again. I called the crisis team who said they would go out but never showed. Sunday she seems much better ( I am aware this is temporary) and agrees to go to her doctor Monday morning. She delayed so I called and got her a 2pm appointment- she decides she doesn't want to go anymore and Dad drives her to the airport (he's hoping I will take her when she arrives - horrible plan). She misses the flight, is very calm about it says she will reschedule it. Calls me Tuesday (yesterday) am and asks if I would be ok to pick her up for a late flight. I said yes, asked what time and she said she would ""tell me when it is time"" ok...?. She runs one errand and texts my dad to let him know she is on her way to pick him up from work at 2:10pm. It is a 12 minute drive. 

She never shows up. Dad waits two hours, finds a ride home, finds her suitcase in the house (purse missing and she has her phone), he calls and files a missing person report. I had him check his bank and she withdrew all the money that was there (about $200) and there is a transaction from Alaska airlines. I call Alaska they half-ass tell me what flight which lands at 1115pm. I get to the airport expecting her to call but the phone has been going straight to voicemail since about 3pm. I call Alaska again to discover that she never got on that flight. Dad has a realization that the car has OnStar and calls them with missing person report number. They send the police, police locate her. She tells them shes just ""going to visit family"" and they let her go. My sister is in Idaho- has not heard from her and I am her only other family she would try to visit. There is no one else. Police will not tell my father where they found her. We don't even know what state she is in. She may be driving to my house which is a 22 hour drive. 

​

TLDR: Mother in psychosis, bout plane ticket to come to visit me, never got on the flight, her phone is dead and is now missing in her car somewhere on the west coast. Police located her via OnStar and let her go. Will not tell us where she is.  She lives in WA state and I live in AZ, think she may be in Oregon. 

What can I do to get the police to locate her and take her to the hospital for a mental eval since she is clearly a danger to herself and has a history of mental health issues?",3.0684479054779814,4.989133722222224,3.732878028404347,88.96994360902256,75.15646258503399,6.2747583243823835,22.262859529776826,7.0608816371341465,0.6496630385487525,3501,94,698,36,76,1106,366,882,0.077,0.851,0.073,-0.4013,4,0,1,0,0,0,124.0,4,0,10,5,22,24,3,0,45,4,78,7,1,6,8,113,135,47,1,12,16,14,1,1,0,11,4,5,2,4,29,49,2,5,15,8,8,40,18,11,0,3,37,7,131,14,106,77,6,143,4,8,1,0,167,49,0,8,46,468,160,9,0.049660494897686494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04852766086505005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264301994835371,0.1076142509474154,0.12068587382545068,0.03377083946135875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04924986676545958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044208369095265584,0.09285171811058986,0.056495982167934965,0.04665766967990395,0.0,0.0,0.030272576757580664,0.05484611498756331,0.04225742348965232,0.05595037195891412,0.0,0.04392067211969174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4563802590005356,0.05679837645615982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12833435734088425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0396498642645553,0.0,0.0,0.06405382179753705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05082962082312742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05759040791765385,0.0,0.041484971191493296,0.0,0.043984458463543916,0.0,0.0,0.032800288520639945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09363098983735048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077758532152813,0.0,0.06004966755209835,0.16335050824291955,0.0,0.0,0.05189111784540283,0.04763887181918698,0.2822320367690925,0.0,0.11915410302667385,0.0,0.0,0.049171697560595286,0.0,0.0,0.044486049113051526,0.0,0.0,0.10557356769361334,0.0,0.0,0.03328638293161368,0.0,0.09962705090327416,0.04932407664824695,0.1467167523878996,0.11460308713251008,0.0,0.056060654043273865,0.0,0.10366530894311032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05458421852325651,0.04047993143957505,0.056019201303494484,0.0,0.0,0.2031248825374136,0.0,0.024261609358520973,0.0,0.17540450726840082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033148765964268384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05516161467413745,0.0,0.2001843943352533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03650617775957698,0.0,0.1532049405499836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731348215660282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05288680632281393,0.06730247313276408,0.07553808831459079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377747659429472,0.04740656158196619,0.0,0.0867232573001541,0.05188464747053695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03181378466110507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04240979130229006,0.1417155083598116,0.039492018768955264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045209049437104014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16431869822704268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04207717617241266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035149953889747,0.1058629600436743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746770236764295,0.07983044938529417,0.2170273070774696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03299222616960042,0.0636408798550796,0.0,0.0,0.08687230180188625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055174637077906576,0.1011486487050917,0.0,0.04851108756290624,0.0,0.059735460826454374,0.0,0.0,0.0819502183167016,0.05858209309942367,0.03941818934401395,0.15933861412819547,0.0,0.0,0.18414310518945493,0.04481087244929835,0.055444169074752435,0.0,0.047870944942476734,0.0,0.07230686347831085,0.0,0.0,0.14110956298444385,0.0,0.12068587382545068,0.0
mentalhealth,DIBE25,2020/02/05,"My friends think I can't have an OCD-like thing because I don't have a certificate I have a thing for which I must order things that aren't in order, it's my OCD

Then, here's the juicy part

When my teacher call me for an interrogation (oral test, whatever) and my mind just goes blank, from knowing what to say. I got an F because of it",4.774583333333332,4.0332472916666715,5.524444444444447,87.515,69.1388888888889,8.866666666666667,29.11111111111111,8.07648339933343,1.5207111111111118,263,8,63,3,4,86,51,72,0.0,0.948,0.052000000000000005,0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,0,7,0,0,0,1,6,10,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,8,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,10,1,6,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,43,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3630836679917845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30409667425680625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300867883851632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23818536674099555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636682469632043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007025780787028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32249853743139584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368299723187921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5935539575371647,0.1908242258087633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EmotionalPsych,2020/02/05,"BPD Paid Research Opportunity  

Hello everyone,

We are looking for participants from the UK who have been diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder to take part in our paid research project - participants will be rewarded with Amazon vouchers  :)

Please find further information in the picture below and don't hesitate to contact us if you have any questions!

Please contact [emotions@hope.ac.uk](mailto:emotions@hope.ac.uk) (reference ""BPD Study "") in order to participate.

Best regards,

Emotions Research Team",11.002916666666673,15.782503458333334,9.061666666666667,46.12500000000003,63.02777777777778,11.377777777777775,46.5,10.686352973137794,7.348549999999999,427,27,42,14,8,129,58,72,0.031,0.725,0.245,0.951,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,3,1,0,4,0,3,0,0,2,0,7,1,0,0,0,9,11,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,4,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,4,3,11,6,2,6,0,0,1,0,12,5,0,2,0,29,5,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865370983649085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985401807902437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4765490382971242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920209156866901,0.0,0.0,0.21682479745323896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21281001424085316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807763735241001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17291357437200167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3758109390391257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886950901508212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048711841296557,0.0,0.0,0.1651908711587659,0.0,0.41534122966961545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119328401688204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224514831076646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22756877728518615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PrettyDisaster227,2020/02/05,"Amanda Todd: A discussion into Mental Health Amanda Todd was a Canadian 15 yr old who died by suicide, her story opened up some doors in the discussion about mental health in Canada - which is a taboo almost-never-discussed subject - but there is still discussion that needs to happen. Mental health hospitals such as Day Hospitals have been opening up in Canada since Amanda's death in 2012. Where were they before she died? In Canada at the time (I am not sure if this is the norm as of 2020), you could sign yourself out at 12 years old, even if you were high-risk and your parents could do nothing to help you if you were older than 13-14. The buildings, organizations, etc are popping up in Canada because Amanda Todd opened some subtle doorways with her video. But how long before those doorways are closed again? 

​

Her video: [Amanda Todd's vid](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOHXGNx-E7E)",7.835925925925927,8.79585481481482,6.461333333333332,77.592,62.58024691358025,8.455308641975309,30.39753086419753,8.238735603445708,2.228578271604938,728,23,119,8,10,216,108,162,0.129,0.871,0.0,-0.9689,1,0,0,0,0,1,38.0,0,5,1,0,8,1,0,0,7,0,15,3,0,1,1,23,17,9,4,6,6,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,5,8,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,11,1,22,10,3,27,0,0,0,0,16,18,0,5,9,77,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932468814990248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15075388692464134,0.16906556906644055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481606428984671,0.0,0.23678911617750675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22217768004859986,0.0,0.0,0.08973126257297939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888025731218431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15517351060645082,0.09189807006420324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230375779784589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4436854472208601,0.0,0.0,0.09325998303058987,0.1470049099368944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313105438279208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4206493370814017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031676419585066,0.1073103240538949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350482338415665,0.0,0.2919998261045984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15449415362906488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509480498186195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111425496797273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521922912181508,0.0,0.13113411085810725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113136842891602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16906556906644055,0.08959907517603435
mentalhealth,rgrgrgrgegegrgrgrg,2020/02/05,"i lost i don’t know what to do anymore i’m constantly anxious and can’t get anything done i have no motivation for anything, my father is threatening to kick me out and i don’t know what to do",1.09,2.9408134761904776,3.676428571428573,87.40607142857145,80.90476190476191,7.057142857142857,27.16666666666667,8.07648339933343,1.7772666666666672,154,7,34,3,4,54,27,42,0.24,0.7020000000000001,0.057999999999999996,-0.7579,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,1,0,6,13,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,6,0,5,11,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,24,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3598422917740133,0.3158909519613088,0.0,0.0,0.5242374419598834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3442120859880641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3259613984808216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16641603004312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3501057339604501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34770738059471284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mac710,2020/02/05,Where does one to begin to get help? I'm a 21 y/o male and I know I've got some serious issues.. I struggle severely out in public always thinking people are judging me and in most social settings I feel like I want to just be a wallflower and not do or say anything to anyone. I'm worried I might be experiencing the early signs of schizophrenia like sometimes I'll see tracers and life feels like a never ending trip. I've been declining mentally the past 2 or 3 years and it's now or never to seek help. At this point I know I need help and I'm willing to accept it but have no idea where to begin. I've got absolutely no form of health insurance and definitely wouldn't be able to afford out of pocket costs. So if anybody could help steer me in the right direction or give good advice I'm all ears and thanks in advance.,3.2156950067476373,4.5064920000000015,4.859298245614038,83.65226720647776,73.44444444444444,7.3668016194331996,26.019343229869552,7.882392219407189,1.4680657669815569,656,22,133,9,13,222,110,171,0.07,0.762,0.16699999999999998,0.9387,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,1,6,0,11,3,1,0,3,36,30,15,0,5,8,0,2,3,0,3,2,2,0,1,3,10,0,0,7,0,1,2,6,2,0,1,3,6,9,6,18,20,4,23,0,0,1,0,9,11,0,8,12,76,12,0,0.14856374561649846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14517477280426513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236169375464521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387922521419536,0.0,0.12225530419088032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861606213276996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000913494241248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158338256032565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15023658724959715,0.21226793910573294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761842534214566,0.14251588207052654,0.0,0.12460822126394965,0.2376399978519142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15791631443639553,0.0,0.0,0.398316588389536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16771038555975934,0.0,0.15506195235075515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16329349862645498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493496708086024,0.21774222559071305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497173130155459,0.15760265676506088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015813493024816,0.2291630385676933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067063888969607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14182090552915932,0.10299539529040903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044075965386854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268726270179746,0.0,0.11814385342636564,0.0,0.0,0.1183860706433631,0.0,0.0,0.16783474555768946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514420295823748,0.0,0.0,0.14693334317985607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553110835657862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13677753679496013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519364944992373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762674631853354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087369512937826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956701813232944
mentalhealth,odd_delivery,2020/02/05,"Do you ever get stuck? Have any of you ever felt stuck on the same thoughts or memories? Even when I've discussed them with my therapist, they continue to persist. How have you gotten past this feeling of being stuck?",3.5689024390243915,6.122735097560978,3.9489634146341466,85.00685975609757,76.07317073170732,7.0268292682926825,27.32317073170732,8.07648339933343,1.9966048780487808,173,7,31,3,4,54,34,41,0.14800000000000002,0.815,0.037000000000000005,-0.6014,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,3,2,1,5,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,2,9,12,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,6,0,5,5,1,6,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,5,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23308864305815197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22638983410346766,0.6200923243730182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17330982119602806,0.0,0.3291034780545651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17907802172337467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32720332948302233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3979709307226401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721132576071839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nugloom,2020/02/05,"PTSD or DID? (23M) I went through continuous and traumatic abuse throughout my childhood. For my whole life I had always been mentally troubled. I finally saw my first Psychiatrist/Therapist in August, and I was diagnosed with PTSD and GAD, and I started taking Lexapro (20MG)

I constantly struggle with dissociation. 24/7, I always feel some degree of detachment and disconnection from myself, the world, and everyone around me. It ranges from mild to very severe, but I always feel it. I have a very fractured and messy sense of identity.

I know dissociative episodes are a part of PTSD, but there have been things over the last few years that have made me wonder if I struggle with multiple personalities.

My whole life I have been very introverted, asocial, and quiet. But over the last few years or so, I feel like I've started to develop this completely different and distinct second personality that I feel take me over at times. This second personality is very feminine, flamboyant, and way more bright than my normal self. It's a harsh contrast from the other personality state I feel.

At first I thought it was just mood swings, but I feel like the ""switch"" has been becoming more severe. Back in the beginning of 2019, I was in my more feminine mindset for a good 6+ months straight. During this time, I started going by a different name. And I was completely dead set on it. I hated hearing my birth name, and I had become continously more feminine and bright of a person. Multiple people have told me that I was different.

After 6+ months, I felt like I switched, and I was back to using my birth name, and being more of my old self. However, ever since that period I've started to feel like I switch back and forth between the two. 

I'm known by different groups of people as the two different names I've used. One group knows the introverted and quiet me, and the other knows my other name. The more femboyish me.

I constantly feeling periods where I switch between what name I identify with. I'll have periods where I'm very introverted and a loner, and dont talk much or show much emotion, then I switch to feeling very flamboyant and talkative, and suddenly identify with colors like pink, and feel interested in feminine things that normally I wasnt really into before.

I was convinced they were just mood swings at first, until I started to notice more severe changes. My whole life I had identified as straight, but ever since this second personality state has come in, I feel very sexually confused whenever I'm in that feminine mindset. I'm completely content with my sexuality when I'm my ""normal"" self, and then when I become more feminine I'm suddenly questioning my sexuality and feeling different. I've noticed my behavior and the things I say are also pretty distinct depending on my state.

Could this be a personality disorder, or is it possible that it's just a very complicated and messed up sense of self identity due to my PTSD?",6.456622368224579,7.835729441988952,7.214176496938927,69.47952068090191,65.81399631675875,11.174137673585188,34.19685431287641,11.09821918222714,4.261553820118461,2369,106,401,72,37,786,222,543,0.102,0.8029999999999999,0.094,-0.6665,7,0,0,0,1,0,72.0,0,0,1,3,16,18,1,3,21,0,33,4,0,4,4,89,75,46,1,5,13,0,13,5,0,0,4,5,0,11,26,36,0,0,20,1,0,3,2,6,0,9,23,23,63,10,53,49,17,73,0,0,5,0,25,22,0,10,48,276,89,0,0.0,0.06116267086165324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04128144825567364,0.12885890004402922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04595380483366004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908052981525967,0.0,0.0,0.17103465128458292,0.04392583195349693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05460837596506921,0.04446708569281403,0.16237151170960562,0.11156833866569456,0.0,0.041215321021413016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05239442283535472,0.0,0.3235989491382955,0.059162357800080986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049965207626357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05806689250417934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338864630478008,0.0,0.04932626073150348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31321470606853,0.1106345687357742,0.04956443919989936,0.056548492151117326,0.0,0.13172687755974138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029337512785293406,0.04329740634579788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096523951617039,0.0,0.0,0.05818083462370063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510897064344118,0.08415632185143812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938472269720252,0.12609753359249934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488452196204469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052022019678010734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240708524726542,0.0,0.07589503084230087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15173342259262276,0.0,0.11754213751177572,0.05416775694329538,0.0,0.03497985538101321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055900720031890914,0.0,0.07157526905369725,0.3155154335535249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819513727900225,0.0,0.052517309989425706,0.0,0.0,0.2413696420889325,0.0,0.05782754863340391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03306985716179872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04105124346670736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154086439227044,0.17495175928951084,0.0,0.08540316622599935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18268872546290876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793135520183368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762542346201959,0.04149115841538765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059936182126459424,0.10288447776655177,0.0,0.0,0.040981459970841336,0.06020146387293021,0.0,0.0,0.04932626073150348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008528066407736,0.0,0.0,0.08916827070927373,0.0,0.3407431140910233,0.0,0.04097449910689116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047853361764518085,0.0,0.17289965069748406,0.0,0.0,0.055980980255051056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648470981953161
mentalhealth,pxachesandrxses,2020/02/05,"Everything is so amazing, why do I feel like this???? I’m 17, I literally got into medical school on Monday. I cried for so long in happiness and relief because somehow, through everything I’ve been through I still managed the work my ASS off to get in, for 8 months. I couldn’t even count the panic attacks and tears that I’ve gone through for this, because I’ve never been so determined to do something. 

And the happiness lasted for a day, and now I feel the same. I’m in an amazing so so loving relationship with somebody that I love so much I can’t even explain, and we’re so healthy. I have an amazing group of supportive friends and have for years, I’m a straight A student without having to put in much/any effort. My mum is pretty rich so When I want something I can almost always have it, as long as I’m a good child. I’m so fucking lucky, so why the hell do I feel like this? 

I have gone through things in the past. physically and emotionally abusive, alcoholic parent (I’m still living with her except the past few weeks she has been so nice to me, I don’t know what’s changed. She stills gets drunk every night though), I was in a severely emotionally abusive controlled relationship, struggled with bulimia and anorexia for years, self harmed for a little while.
But all of these things are over, everything seems fine in my life but I feel the EXACT same as I did when these were happening, if not worse.

I was on Prozac for a while but it never helped me and made me extremely tired so I stopped. Anxiety has been ruining my life since I was a child but as I get older it mixes with depression and other weird symptoms and my life just seems like a huge fucking mess, but in reality everything is great.  

I’m going to a doctor today, even though I’m under 18 I’m hoping they can consider giving me a different medication because I literally can’t go on like this. I can’t kill myself either, I got to the point where I have dreams every night about my boyfriend helping me kill myself; and it’s like a nightmare but a good dream at the same time, and it’s always in the same way. He makes a bubble bath for me and lights candles and puts on my favourite music and then he helps me cut up my wrist and holds me until I wake up. I feel so fucking deluded, one night I actually asked him if he would help me because I’m too afraid to do it alone, but I am far too exhausted to be living anymore. 
And then he freaked out and wanted to tell somebody so I wouldn’t hurt myself and I started shouting and crying but when I look back I would obviously do the same. 

I dont even think anybody’s going to read this, it’s so long, I just have to much to say and I don’t know why I’m even saying it. Anyway, yeah I’m going to see the doctor today, I actually made a list of my symptoms to tell them:


VERY VERY tired during the day/all the time but sometimes more awake at night time

Outbursts of anger (eg. About a week ago I was getting ready for school and couldn’t find my uniform, found out it was in the car and I had to go get it and the clothes were cold. I got so angry I was throwing things and slamming doors and SOBBING in anger while I got dressed right up until I left the house)
(Fine with my boyfriend one minute and the next I’m really annoyed at everything he says and don’t want him to touch me)
( switching between liking/hating friends over small things for periods of time) 

 after angry outbursts I’m sad/crying

Crying almost everyday. I get from hours to minutes periods of horrible anxiety but it goes away suddenly and then I’m completely fine/happy

Laughing spells that end in wanting to cry

When My bf leaves  I have horrible anxiety/sadness, can’t be away from him for more than a day. Since we started dating we spend everyday with each other and if we don’t I’m extremely distressed, and we’ve been dating for a year and 5 months. It was the same with my ex

I feel like I’m dreaming or nothing around me is real/ makes me really anxious

I don’t feel like myself anymore/ don’t know who I’m turning into

Very scared when I’m alone/think someone’s in my room/following me


I’m not asking for help from anybody here because I know there’s nothing you can do, I just wanted to get my thoughts out there and see what people think. Am I a spoiled, ungrateful teenage bitch? Am I really actually unwell???",3.4902928848906143,4.885112448630139,4.568921829210115,85.59302085463095,72.91552511415526,7.558617869556327,27.57234376064881,8.11326742549577,1.712424643903768,3419,127,698,51,67,1118,342,876,0.168,0.7020000000000001,0.13,-0.9943,2,2,3,0,0,5,86.0,3,1,2,3,47,54,12,5,41,1,61,23,3,5,5,126,143,83,2,14,22,3,8,7,3,3,14,4,2,3,31,51,2,3,19,6,2,11,19,26,0,2,26,17,95,28,101,110,14,118,1,4,3,6,46,44,7,11,69,447,126,8,0.0,0.11195527748040217,0.13831301158475814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04187987130208454,0.0504905723255288,0.094618152375587,0.0489316060065224,0.0,0.0,0.0786233046345133,0.0,0.0,0.03212824265610037,0.0,0.07228464211779627,0.05337343971686577,0.09370875556894642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042058096049057914,0.08833545680456813,0.05374804574411085,0.08877652774722104,0.03632851424505941,0.0,0.14400066853621585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04997898062490033,0.0,0.04953551840326413,0.0,0.052989322025679735,0.0,0.0,0.25948225240117184,0.09140741372967408,0.0,0.0406920778395844,0.0,0.0,0.04936100406882117,0.0,0.09671458678376037,0.0,0.0,0.055370827011353256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628860661488714,0.041845076318900894,0.0,0.0,0.15602449414783132,0.0,0.07961195621281128,0.0,0.21230394717460133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721955827240945,0.13500744454358432,0.0,0.0,0.043181104400470335,0.0,0.0,0.05180174030350351,0.07300279085990508,0.13103181560509414,0.1727850590475709,0.045321740829717606,0.13425220556063155,0.07925378459338428,0.15114467576447724,0.05208781585837737,0.0,0.0,0.0417786268021772,0.15087964897848205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158336749252921,0.0,0.0,0.046924978135536484,0.0465268408841993,0.05451442503738335,0.05057678515237009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453925853483123,0.0,0.10385853866116687,0.03851100774326582,0.0,0.0500256684816462,0.05133186677515675,0.0,0.10011169238654086,0.16157075737278725,0.04735193495083402,0.08343645971461683,0.12543110292006632,0.03967392889625285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528097400843608,0.0894087854431297,0.0630728530079273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518880097626184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542106946308212,0.0,0.10419160638708333,0.0,0.07287656428759179,0.0,0.05024562875838511,0.17734505265093292,0.0,0.0906657670623812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402891437268764,0.0,0.0,0.055431866912692716,0.05246001826138821,0.0,0.09020146009337576,0.03275375729489733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0446618272889154,0.0,0.0,0.04806518362883282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498861500101684,0.0,0.0,0.04725781834588775,0.05377519100033193,0.0907991340787165,0.0,0.0,0.10144696932672014,0.0,0.04034700018380085,0.0,0.11271343995816815,0.0473005201647854,0.0956289917178214,0.07529634920116407,0.08602020759530599,0.049286873354077665,0.05337343971686577,0.0,0.07816315930810074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04003056328811695,0.07274306943386938,0.0467265458564536,0.0,0.06688055529165657,0.0,0.11318983355284284,0.039498963221782216,0.0,0.04939076666464315,0.0,0.0,0.053613103761142165,0.0,0.09821135852528516,0.0,0.0,0.08258848279757164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12555000290765286,0.09081812875149037,0.09283601042469997,0.037507279014724164,0.11019583510120977,0.10860243120511494,0.08956553445485423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05138902933501272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694630079355997,0.1393317231982142,0.03750090825422543,0.07579423166331081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789388182043387,0.0,0.0,0.045542526031919744,0.0,0.03439494683261902,0.0,0.048146725055255066,0.06712303207398687,0.0,0.0,0.09127275711462224
mentalhealth,CheekyGodwin,2020/02/05,"Please Respond. Hi there everyone, I'm gonna cut to the chase so that I'm not wasting anyone's time, but I'm a University Art Student and I'm currently collecting information regarding mental health issues in order to draw them in my final pieces. **I, myself, have depression and anxiety**, but I don't have some of the other issues that rampage our brains. I would love if people could get in contact with me and describe to me what it looks like, feels like, etc. to have other issues such as Schizophrenia, BPD, DID etc - though, please do this in a way that doesn't trigger yourself or anyone else, as I wouldn't want to cause anybody any upset - so please only message or comment if you feel as though you can. Don't force yourself. 

When my project is finished, I'd be more than happy to post a print and send over my art if you'd also be interested, I could also dedicate the pieces to you when they are put up in my local gallery. 

I'm based in the UK so I run on GMT time, but I'm usually always available to talk if you feel as though you would rather have a private conversation rather than posting on here. I hope that asking this of you all is okay,",3.2107372958257687,4.915341012931037,4.2781397459165165,86.13872958257716,74.2155172413793,6.9531760435571695,25.572595281306718,7.669130373188453,1.3211689655172414,913,31,183,12,19,297,133,232,0.047,0.8009999999999999,0.152,0.9785,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,7,2,0,15,10,1,1,8,1,21,3,1,2,1,32,37,27,0,13,12,0,3,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,10,5,0,0,4,2,0,3,5,3,0,0,1,4,24,7,27,27,7,26,0,1,1,1,21,11,0,8,10,125,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560317708328594,0.096559198115271,0.0,0.0,0.07891495688580072,0.0,0.08877453207276984,0.0,0.0,0.16228350073385595,0.11890238489873442,0.0,0.0,0.10848692908350506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14615531436669346,0.12954521813666486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192107513767602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18530586617756173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09994986662287048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09694117070235424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588429385386649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108865009859158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17602835841502049,0.08290296779892609,0.0,0.12712223342447956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060629012971553924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353265133452995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335099860864485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525942038195724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633642300405056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338799313523425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744903952110938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047356442599728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694662540334913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825787391815547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804513764553512,0.0,0.0,0.3821495152444084,0.0,0.0,0.2222791277930982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665783494111928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327302151643224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3420425062709065,0.0,0.1353341928640407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278077842248667,0.0,0.06844667507467075,0.09211156021627763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16487086576324522,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway0865488,2020/02/05,"Please, please help me figure out what happened to me. It's like something broke for a second and everything felt like a lie. I was talking to a friend about feelings of invalidation- I went through years of an authority figure verbally berating me and making me feel like my problems were so minor compared to other people's that it wasn't ok to feel sad or upset about them. 

I talked about how when I discovered I was trans, I hated myself and it felt like my *existence* was an *insult* to *real* trans people. How much it hurt to feel like I've got no right to say who I am.

It turned into telling them that my existence in general and everything I am and everything that hurts me is wrong. I don't feel like a person then, I feel like a living, walking insult. They'd helped me realize that I was emotionally abused and suggested I get tested for C-PTSD and I'd agreed with them.

But suddenly I felt worthless and pathetic and disgusting for that. My violent thoughts came back and it was really hard not to have a self-harm relapse. Suddenly, months of progress were gone and I'd regressed to not even being able to believe that anything that's ever happened to me has ever been a big issue.

I started to become convinced that I've overreacted to every conflict and faked every diagnosis, even the ones I'd had no doubt about. It got hard to grasp everything that happened in an emotional sense and even remember how I'd *felt* in situations that previously, I knew were traumatic to me. 

All of my understanding of my mental health seemed like it just unraveled in an instant. All of those events and feelings were distant and it hurt; it was painful to try to remember them. I got so dizzy I had to lay on the floor. I felt pissed off because all they did was ask if I was safe and they left me. I hated myself for feeling angry at them, and for ever thinning that any of those feelings of trauma weren't fake, or any of my anxiety or depression, even the time my violent OCD got so bad I just barely managed not to be institutionalized after going to the ER.

It felt so unreal. Like everything was an act. It wasn't just a *doubt* or a *feeling*, it was mentally true that I'd made up everything I felt on purpose, that had I wanted to, I could've just made it to away in an instant and lived as a ""normal"" person.

I think I'm coming back from it but it was terrifying and I felt like I was losing my grip on reality.

Am I being dramatic to even ask what that was? I've never had a panic attack where it seems like everything I believed and felt about myself shifted drastically to the point where it didn't feel like reality. Please help me, I'm desperate to know what it was and scared it'll happen again.",3.941238588363541,5.437709530726261,5.339277830767134,80.11080801199077,71.94227188081936,8.665467593223418,27.80892037970659,9.18016646516576,2.347333051732752,2146,79,416,46,41,720,228,537,0.152,0.737,0.11,-0.9642,0,0,1,0,1,0,57.0,0,0,8,2,30,46,9,5,22,1,40,3,1,6,8,96,93,38,0,4,14,0,24,12,1,1,2,1,0,2,41,26,0,2,33,0,0,7,11,29,1,2,48,25,59,17,63,40,4,46,0,8,0,0,24,22,1,9,29,289,100,2,0.053049495060787724,0.06285497692940584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215095157207009,0.0,0.040582718518649336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04365521432510895,0.0,0.0991882334528016,0.06035145910541138,0.049841746892201014,0.08158357430367733,0.044294112496868716,0.032338479801444914,0.058588999407488414,0.0,0.11953722922007876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067448980280266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04569744267155749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04235570512933854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04569145236166988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11934708335311656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17519345582973272,0.14395891627017632,0.08939297518934873,0.0,0.3337422585661354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29505760527884195,0.18949284935608532,0.4584225107709698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04098590828900234,0.0,0.0277161716320984,0.0,0.03014925056913909,0.0,0.16971410945485366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18764597313442674,0.0,0.09504385518343796,0.10475078700328501,0.0,0.05638913254339108,0.0,0.0,0.10667387491164887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17037174497498206,0.0,0.0,0.05536989015194814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029154615121257613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057638431604273524,0.0,0.0,0.3110076438384216,0.0,0.09368735210095967,0.0,0.0,0.05934881543771235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039342981929303,0.035410949889156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069228272937483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042343600835815766,0.0,0.03899748282281293,0.0,0.04091504098851249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05197724168527421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035947710784913024,0.0,0.056448403012181576,0.06224215230159385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355568064158523,0.09264154574533397,0.0,0.17469724533709094,0.050148919944596464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0507612022823725,0.06201202085858645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060381939391681363,0.033984864945896504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018947304571037,0.04530397892439622,0.0,0.042187087723159766,0.053111799115087184,0.0,0.0,0.09658853580729364,0.05534219301337344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05962985513503779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04084009306162816,0.0,0.0,0.03754870564827816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527834930140657,0.04636759693427316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03399197439022614,0.0,0.04211537339216475,0.03093358718268378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036017124885963044,0.057702617080149836,0.0,0.05522639524920734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031289966651875445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491774134014983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580012949997196,0.0,0.03416213552313095
mentalhealth,Split-Leaf,2020/02/05,"Seasonal Depression I think my boyfriend may have seasonal depression. For about the last 2 months he’s just seemed off. He hasn’t been his usual self. I told him last night that he hasn’t seemed like himself lately and asked if he had anything going on and he said he’s just been feeling ‘kind of nothing’ lately, said he didn’t really know how to describe it. He has a lot of mental illness, specifically depression, in his family and they all refuse to talk about it and act like it’s not happening. I’m not sure how to talk to him about without seeming judgemental or making him uncomfortable. With the weather being so cold where we live and having only like 6 hours of sunshine a day, I feel like seasonal depression may be to blame. 

What are some tips for helping with depression that isn’t prescription medication? I bought him a multivitamin and some vitamin D considering he mainly eats fast food and frequently skips meals, I figured he might be feeling like garbage from his sucky diet.",6.612147950089128,7.580762010695188,6.704612299465243,74.74946746880573,65.2566844919786,10.511408199643496,33.23039215686275,10.504223727775694,3.588287344028522,804,33,143,20,12,257,116,187,0.16399999999999998,0.723,0.114,-0.9211,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,1,0,9,13,0,0,5,0,17,7,0,3,2,38,34,12,0,1,7,0,3,5,0,3,3,2,0,1,6,10,4,1,9,0,1,2,7,5,0,0,8,7,16,8,20,20,5,20,0,5,1,0,29,4,0,11,19,86,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597729262232033,0.0,0.10903414693940804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521728148945014,0.0,0.5022701138283615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11934252703805505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10994923208473777,0.0,0.17691626133276134,0.1666422756928327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410305465266635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06628402789798232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313631917370036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817523340438946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148579424186982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214531340949315,0.06409729215725443,0.19013949908489206,0.263129469250257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848998310007349,0.0,0.10298722096105208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915541992265886,0.0,0.0,0.0778520310136483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749336096822086,0.1175365147305606,0.1237269532516832,0.0,0.0,0.09309367118979717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945019830767948,0.0,0.1119104935419612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870305459512785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471674067045607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218853871028056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185291714330032,0.12167146434441925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099232424291465,0.0,0.0,0.18748699810052108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747323709961653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144582249893778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845245821685894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11242802505322776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deaggon,2020/02/05,"I’m an introvert 😔✌🏼 I lose all my confidence in public situations and it’s sad I know. I’m about to graduate from college and during the graduation ceremony, we are supposed to not only give our childhood pictures but also write something related to the school like what are our future plans and our memorable experiences from this school. Whatever we’ve written would be ANNOUNCED while we’re walking to get our diploma. I don’t really know what to do at this point and this is such a pain in the ass because I don’t want to do it in the first place. I’m sorry for wasting your time with such a useless rant but I’m really not ready for this. A few words of courage would help a lot really.",3.0177659574468088,4.866925049645392,4.8095212765957465,81.50875,75.09929078014184,8.387943262411348,28.062056737588648,9.075114841892004,2.4382524822695038,556,23,110,13,12,189,90,141,0.18600000000000005,0.7170000000000001,0.098,-0.9229,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,5,1,0,3,4,6,0,0,9,0,10,2,1,0,1,20,20,8,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,1,0,11,2,17,16,3,12,0,3,0,1,10,6,1,1,6,71,19,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15975690934796713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177863339490605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954145090547663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16992523055123265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437217596557516,0.1916386818694892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390238487235387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21957798934398767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09759808870257104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22349280739189809,0.0,0.16983828026432515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151934954825262,0.21257057902397836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20871832331075799,0.0,0.1888483000617313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3839355252286912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4043581200944302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.224551132658891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15379358433984405,0.0,0.2236274369371079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648815888188715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117830194901967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838233738212399,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayofaguy,2020/02/05,"Hi , looking for coping mechanisms that work for my situation (context in post). I'm a 20 something male, socially isolated, no close friends or contacts of any kind , unemployed etc. I'm more or less what's referred to as a ghost in society -- I don't exist, I barely exist legally. I have my own reservations about how I'll resolve that situation and that isn't really why I'm posting here. I've been this way for a very long time now and have mostly gotten used to it, things are fine most days, but I get these 'attacks' once in a while that I can best describe as an intense emotional pressure/ pain throughout my body that begins at my chest. I experience intense feelings of loneliness / stress when it happens, and used to just cry through it, though passive calming methods I've picked up over the years have helped (e.g self hugging, arm touching/rubbing etc). I don't tend to cry when it happens anymore unless it goes on for more than about an hour. They'd happen most often before sleep for a few years but have changed to a more sporadic pattern recently.  I'm just asking if anyone is aware of coping methods for this as the ones I've been using are getting less effective as time goes on. I've been considering buying a 'hugging' product / doll (those weird ones you can find in Japan) but I don't want to waste money on something that isn't going to do anything for me. Thanks if anyone can help, sorry if this post weirded anyone out.",6.1560974067046175,6.5901823369175645,6.332452034577272,78.8931878557875,66.13261648745521,8.715243516761543,34.33291165928737,8.4952907291091,2.7724520767446754,1148,50,210,15,17,367,164,279,0.102,0.753,0.145,0.8954,2,0,4,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,1,4,11,15,1,2,11,0,20,7,4,6,0,31,41,21,1,4,11,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,18,5,0,0,5,0,2,1,6,6,0,2,4,2,15,9,37,36,13,30,0,0,1,2,11,12,0,9,13,137,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480509778011493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090923754875357,0.23074776226633945,0.0,0.09052223165593806,0.0,0.10283697360057988,0.1251430979408045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360355698874838,0.0,0.11544025940776535,0.0,0.0,0.12218736771791967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116367476821402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416639524401565,0.07094215718619319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373738731752755,0.0,0.0,0.2453625027648095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760301431946648,0.0,0.0,0.05562029085041557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005397889796255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498723330358643,0.0,0.11494295688996314,0.0,0.06251664289053331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29182308193838163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746397600182878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832976204135852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145501028367652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973482637383077,0.0923739328718624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714848613055237,0.1490803356931836,0.0,0.11704982997042475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31605438078937603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047006560356715,0.0,0.10861365438634436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475602385080548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472936002533506,0.11008139158138568,0.11213313463191052,0.0,0.16936974985132186,0.0,0.12313817646071196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260068614818855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127501586148414,0.0,0.0,0.0730804073563094,0.0,0.10807635686256303,0.0,0.1282860427185897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850190971144208,0.0,0.09076312866455437,0.0648819998608626,0.08731442733509738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925964970511136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008272934490505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416752978306993
mentalhealth,evansmars_,2020/02/05,"Should I be mad at my parents? Last year I went to the hospital because I was having suicidal thoughts. A few days after I got out my parents told me they wanted me to get a drug test, not because they thought drugs contributed, it was so they could increase my life insurance to cover my student loans. 

When they first told me I was more just annoyed cause they woke from a nap, but when i thought more about I realized it hurt me to hear them say that. I feel like they don’t think I can make it. This along with them not really ever asking or helping with my mental health has been discouraging.

Do I have the right to be made or am I overreacting as it does make sense to do it? And more so, should I talk to them about it? Bringing it up to them probably won’t go very well so i’ve just been avoiding thinking or talking about it.",3.1881511470985164,4.472106906432749,4.0312280701754375,89.58910931174091,73.50292397660819,7.3668016194331996,26.604138551506967,7.882392219407189,1.3526856500224924,655,23,143,9,13,210,102,171,0.109,0.828,0.063,-0.8384,2,1,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,10,1,12,7,2,1,5,0,19,4,0,4,1,31,39,11,1,4,8,2,1,1,0,3,4,2,0,0,10,5,0,2,7,1,1,4,4,5,1,1,14,3,31,2,20,19,5,16,0,2,0,0,20,4,0,3,9,106,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358843722601965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742161072359821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467935179979421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409080006504788,0.0,0.0,0.09215607558381853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250492214514914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33142790459796234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12925758079584707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225249317062553,0.10208490555699076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154723436505092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465724361311495,0.0,0.0812110696372769,0.0,0.11428695656762487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15189172809670054,0.16105413730058266,0.0,0.09578015285500628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15297308539127574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647928309928605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093164562868487,0.06981175027763631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521161664504494,0.190768331755086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400552267881922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3173381158549641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406601829986796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154281388870562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203237287234253,0.0,0.11363660635685476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15630499215774854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297087268483408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831239282703016,0.0,0.34033030242403217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730864354132087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790413594953945,0.08428374214099378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12848063315843508,0.1324659906610831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202031607932933
mentalhealth,JID_09,2020/02/05,"Locked inside my brain -Depression, Anxiety, Paranoia If you’re reading this would be nice to talk to some people that are able to relate and maybe help other people out as well as myself. This is sort of like my life story and the issues I have now in life.


My name is James and I’m 20 years old. I like to consider myself different from a lot of the people in this world. In many aspects of life, I feel as if I’m unique. At times it’s a gift but at times it can also be a curse. So let me tell you a bit about myself and how I feel about everything. 


At five years old I lived with my Mum in Spain for five years and moved back to the UK at ten years old. My teenage years in school weren’t too bad but I feel as if growing up the way I did has had a massive affect of the way I am now. In school I wasn’t very popular but I’m more the type of person to keep myself to myself and that’s what I did in school. I had a best mate in school that I’m still good friends with now we’ve been mates for eight years. In school where I was so quiet and kept myself to myself I was never involved in any of the parties all the school kids were invited to and when I did go to parties they were hosted by my best mate. None of the girls took interest in me, I was just seen as the weird quiet kid.

It’s sort of the same now and because others see me like that I see my self like that “the weird quiet kid.” With all of my mates I’m like a follower I’m not a leader, I often tend to follow what they do or what they want to do. They often go out to the clubs, I don’t mind going out clubbing but I’m awful with small talk and lack confidence. It’s always a battle in my mind, at times I want to meet new people but I can’t do that because of my confidence and then because I don’t do that I get the thought in my mind that I don’t need to meet new people and make small talk so I sit in the corner watching all my friends mingle with the new people.

I consider myself one of the nicest people you’ll ever meet and I have this thing about which I consider myself as “too nice.” I’m always there for everyone when they need it with the advice and I often put my friends ahead of anyone including my family. When I’ve talked to girls in the past it hasn’t got past the second date and I feel as if that’s because I’m too nice, too quiet and not bad boy enough. 

Speaking of bad boys I’m very easily intimidated and very anxious. I hate where there are groups of people, I always feel like I’m being watched or talked about so I try to avoid social interactions. I don’t like todays society, I feel as if everyone in the world are puppets in a type of way. The way everyone dresses and how everyone has a mobile phone. Today’s society is revolves around social media and trying to be the best, I don’t want that but it’s everyone else’s expectations you’ve got to live up to. 

I feel as if I’m rambling on about a lot of things and this post is meant to be about mental health so let’s talk about that. What I’ve talked about links in to it, I feel very anxious most of the time. I’ve never been to the doctor but I would say I have social anxiety. With anxiety comes overthinking and I tend to overthink a lot. I feel as if the way my brain works is also a gift and it’s also a curse, I mentioned this before. I work differently to a lot of people and I’m very interested in how the brain works, I’m fixated on trying to learn how the brain works after all it is the most powerful component in our body. Overthinking is crazy and I’m sure I’m not the only one who has it. Where I’m “too nice” if I ever do anything wrong, even if I tried to do the right thing I feel a lot of guilt. 

When I was in college I was the same as I was in school keeping myself to myself. In college that’s when I first started smoking weed. I used to really enjoy it and I’d always have a good high. I can’t smoke weed anymore it makes me anxious, paranoid and almost as if I have a personality change. I feel as if weed is one of the things that has really affected my thinking. When I got high, I always felt as if every little comment made was about me, they’d talk about my personal life such as my sex life or other stuff and I felt uncomfortable talking about it but because it makes me uncomfortable, I feel as if it makes it look like I’m hiding things. I often hear voices when I smoke which are known as delusions. But when you’re certain you’ve heard something its hard for someone to tell you different. When I hear things I’m certain I’ve heard them but I never ask anyone I’m around for two reasons, one I feel as if they’re plotting against me and hey wouldn’t tell me the truth and the second is that you can get into a lot more of a difficult place in your mind if you mix what you think you’ve heard with reality. 

Since all of that happened with weed, I’ve never been able to think straight again. I got it often that whoever I smoked with they could read my mind and knew all my dark thoughts and just picked on me when I was high because it was easy to tell when I was hiding something. But since that happened with weed the way I think now will never be the same. I still have friends but I’m detached with my feelings I don’t trust anyone but I get times when I do. I struggle to show emotion, someone can say something and I’ll just agree with no emotion. I’m mostly with my own thought, daydreaming. Often I will be walking to places but when I daydream I can go completely the wrong way and not realise until after. I love daydreaming but I spend most of my life confused. Who am I, what do I want to do. 

Motivation is very hard for me and I’m very disorganised. If someone asks me to do something like go to the shop to get some milk I say something like I will later, genuinely forget  and they will ask again and I won’t want to. Lazy and disorganised. My bedroom is an absolute shit tip and it affects how I am in the day. I want to clean it I really do but I don’t know where to start. Doing things is an effort for me even the simple things. My mates will wanna go to the shops or go to somewhere like a bowling alley and I usually say “could do.” Which again is showing no emotion, I don’t mind doing things but generally I don’t want to but if I have to then I will. This is all confusing to write and I don’t even know if it makes sense.

I wouldn’t say I’m depressed, I would say I’m lonely and paranoid and very disorganised. There’s no one to talk to about this, they will only tell you how you are instead of seeing it from your viewpoint. They’re not in your head so they will never understand. My paranoia sometimes has often lead me to think that my own family know all my dark thought and they know who I am and because they know who I am they don’t love me and I felt at one point they wanted to put me in prison and lock me up. But because they know I’m weird and fragile and very passive, they haven’t. This thought by far the one that has made me ponder most about leaving this world. But then I’d be giving them what they want.

I feel so detached from people and I feel so detached from reality. I have often considered just leaving everyone without a note and joining an abbey. I’ve always been interested by buddhas and how they keep peace with there minds. They are forgiving and I would love to give that a try but I’m 20 years old so unfortunately I don’t think it could be a possibility.

If you have somewhat similar to this maybe send me a message, I often give good advice and we could maybe talk about this.

If you’re going through depression, I am always here to talk for that as well. I got through my depression trying to understand the mind. I feel as if this could help you to. If you’re interested give this video a listen:


Trevor Ilesley - How to understand the mind/ dark night of the soul (1h17m)",2.2925046394032367,3.68844866525167,3.743169749723005,90.30898598831828,75.99211643420254,6.754425785506822,22.707774591116966,7.390329992928282,0.6887320280689591,6135,170,1369,74,133,2026,437,1649,0.098,0.765,0.13699999999999998,0.9968,6,3,8,0,0,0,112.0,2,13,21,13,96,64,3,5,76,1,131,20,7,23,20,297,272,157,0,47,57,1,23,11,9,16,8,18,2,11,87,76,1,5,49,9,3,19,37,22,2,15,46,48,201,42,199,193,36,163,1,5,7,4,121,65,1,54,81,939,288,21,0.05526854841466927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05400778585667332,0.0,0.0,0.02767173385600674,0.0,0.0,0.0662973572988517,0.16095750913237458,0.0,0.0,0.0187922540806282,0.0,0.0634204323908289,0.09365659221258282,0.027405774462686848,0.057967581163942176,0.0,0.02274065307987704,0.04920072570177067,0.0775029480931446,0.0,0.0,0.021249051103492282,0.06922039403615897,0.13476477651785007,0.0,0.02351473198997292,0.0,0.0870013976440934,0.0,0.03016947022013948,0.03069544894316916,0.0,0.12339595687431175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029233397937362324,0.023804480323757163,0.0289740107423218,0.0,0.0,0.11031859666599543,0.0,0.0,0.017821820737265237,0.0,0.09520543952751463,0.0,0.0,0.08661580467365647,0.0,0.028284850615666875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023084890147611288,0.0932545170348886,0.0,0.02855359236330433,0.0,0.054756532466692036,0.04999356622518005,0.023283067876152964,0.1584343994754764,0.024835903789265198,0.0,0.052102268670505034,0.0,0.2375362290564917,0.01974193101530893,0.07959971061580473,0.0,0.0,0.02350569952378332,0.0,0.0,0.08540068681122277,0.0,0.05775107084290379,0.1060372555281006,0.1256415589130183,0.06953495431755871,0.1105082676129856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04887379483590789,0.0,0.0495097635302983,0.027283124638282842,0.02836073782502716,0.029373941245477094,0.062291670859080564,0.0,0.03704534299135258,0.08759138378095478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028843002662619726,0.0,0.07368783790104481,0.0,0.0,0.0911224464338765,0.0,0.0,0.058521412622726685,0.0,0.05651583531271882,0.1171134306913204,0.14850781568256635,0.027696802540069548,0.048803140816899335,0.0,0.023205830464356144,0.0,0.0,0.14096203032047144,0.07482303415865547,0.05229643684755467,0.09223046308525903,0.028016816675392384,0.08328702822051992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02784884875033389,0.0,0.25112465373016457,0.0,0.0,0.029370860154174692,0.0,0.04098092834424316,0.1278795352059776,0.08006806268851739,0.0,0.025932894346509763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599008878129476,0.0,0.13107989568469372,0.042034221565530716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052760083228408576,0.19158126255749885,0.0723875470025976,0.05774386978243766,0.0,0.026123321312722658,0.0311534920427723,0.026465995871689574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05556015643224552,0.0,0.0,0.05528350486878996,0.0,0.053109671019752405,0.02841263636700997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023599519181954763,0.0,0.13185530404933887,0.0,0.19577152574917706,0.06606281616510899,0.0,0.028828574809512838,0.0,0.028366185358638017,0.04571871437803482,0.0,0.0,0.08450898746450032,0.07024329257779596,0.10637107186646036,0.027331003797615785,0.0,0.03911936303356045,0.0,0.044137534157249324,0.0,0.0,0.028889343445703826,0.031634632525219517,0.0,0.0,0.02604497640221108,0.0,0.0,0.2665365940818371,0.1207678684357535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652308548079435,0.10624156253383846,0.0,0.10969263471120436,0.08056883759621618,0.0,0.05238812151536376,0.0,0.0307026954411619,0.11257114935228263,0.0,0.026994670483475675,0.08630476207457667,0.0,0.02386714029637179,0.030435248898526068,0.20521053284732305,0.1466946981615811,0.15354360417336574,0.0,0.0,0.049693062510618016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026638454204495843,0.0,0.08047232298222783,0.0,0.0,0.0785223821233191,0.06042748148935759,0.0,0.12456896594978012
mentalhealth,boobsaget_27,2020/02/05,"My boyfriend won't get help. Im not sure if this is the correct place for this, but I need some advice/venting. My boyfriend has dealt with persistent ADHD for a very long time. Honestly, if hes still running off his diagnosis from middle school, ADHD might not even be what it is. I was misdiagnosed with ADHD until college. He hasnt been to anybody about it for years, because NOTHING helps. He cant meditate. Therapy doeant work. All medications are bad. He just will not listen to me and I cannot try anymore. I have been improving my own anxiety and depression for months now, partially on his request. Its been working. I was able to meditate after years of it not working. Im on medications, which I realized were an absolute necessity to stay sane and functional. This idea that hes ""special"" and nothing woll ever work for him is just. Pissing. Me. Off. I dont know what to do. I know I cant force him to get help, but I cant help but think he's being so dumb. I understand that hes used to living with this, but I know he would be far happier if he got treatment. How can he tell me that I need to fix my mental health, but refuse to fix his own?",1.83272575250836,3.9812387905982938,3.707740616871053,86.60078595317727,79.8974358974359,7.317428465254553,25.558528428093645,8.321376580360154,1.7654372352285397,903,36,188,19,23,304,130,234,0.149,0.799,0.053,-0.9684,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,5,9,7,2,0,3,0,30,4,1,2,4,40,42,15,0,6,14,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,14,7,0,1,7,0,0,1,11,4,0,0,7,1,28,3,26,28,4,19,0,1,0,0,23,7,2,5,10,126,42,6,0.11608038242982832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4185181855308647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880117483283997,0.0,0.11512054764115877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692227064809336,0.07076152371006683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997986329256052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13604534368618168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666999781474126,0.10500135163509296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129441755696772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284008597387687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338801835950818,0.0,0.0,0.31122493389307165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104062241056513,0.2507734650356983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19138422725751314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250110437673124,0.10272748561378946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338775460448842,0.11698172309194163,0.12314294172732253,0.0,0.0,0.09265425378404167,0.0,0.0,0.17214426544506534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22276451529329408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212792931891892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747954425483373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372624268385847,0.09270194335560372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940438668521553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145937069363394,0.0,0.1327480338141505,0.0,0.0,0.0743796219406238,0.0,0.0,0.06768740448854048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078810959953431,0.0,0.0,0.12084377190401198,0.0,0.1002561801450845,0.0,0.0957784724257129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33803160367838897,0.0,0.0,0.0824601731692734,0.0,0.0,0.1495039208799504
mentalhealth,Cydonn,2020/02/05,"People with Major Depression Disorder and/or Dysthymia Just got diagnosed with MDD & Dysthymia

What are your current treatment plans and if you are on meds could you share your experience please. Thanks",11.226363636363638,12.874346333333335,8.008636363636366,67.03295454545456,55.36363636363636,11.44848484848485,40.74242424242424,11.20814326018867,5.094406060606059,171,8,23,4,2,48,28,33,0.153,0.67,0.177,-0.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,4,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,6,5,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,2,3,3,1,2,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382548701054492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24925620107804056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688865125165715,0.3168635951381295,0.0,0.0,0.357793756947969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053791385047891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496847476797054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3467697752321777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21643140479476447,0.0,0.0,0.3426879690984834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874201739741023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imokandthatsok,2020/02/05,"I feel like I got a lot of catching up to do with life Ranty post sorry. No need to waist your time here

So looking at LinkedIn at the middle of the night is a very bad idea. Now I can't sleep because I can't stop thinking about how successful some of my classmates are now while I'm still working at a minimum wage job. Don't get me wrong I love my work right now. Best one I ever had to be honest but I still feel like I'm behind and everyone else is sprinting right past me.

Looking back to my school days, I wasn't top of the class or anything like that but I always make sure that I'm ahead on my assignments and projects. Life is proving to be more difficult than that.

No real passion in life or a meaningful hobby, I feel like I'm lost and got no skills that I'm really confident at. It doesn't help that I'm mostly an introvert, and have low confidence to begin with.

The one thing I really like to do is write and make up stories. I think that coronates to me enjoying a lot of video games and the story telling aspect of it. But who am I kidding? Me a writer? English isn't  even my first language.

Getting sick of me saying ""I"" this and that. It kinda makes me feel shallow saying all this but I just have to get this out of my system",1.7484179203174082,3.409641950570343,3.316713506364689,91.64998842783932,78.16349809885931,6.399008100512482,23.22185485204166,7.255503002510835,0.7629412795503385,975,31,216,12,23,322,142,263,0.10300000000000001,0.71,0.188,0.9753,2,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,9,13,17,0,0,12,0,19,8,2,4,4,42,45,16,0,1,7,0,4,5,0,0,4,2,0,1,15,10,1,1,9,2,1,1,9,5,0,3,5,8,28,12,32,38,7,33,0,2,2,2,10,14,0,7,21,145,43,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620277762424304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514310964094098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890249509564464,0.0965355380082019,0.07047917589996966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133312509967492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456353335372158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658334026944912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763640744138851,0.10458238239676954,0.0,0.11047719537960173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338381338522813,0.2477908660559349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983439366988674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812156552558601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18493928357821096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749577634231214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051775304835367,0.0,0.0,0.11473223732217855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449915562572597,0.2824236349763912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19417866887323929,0.0,0.12620983847017445,0.1965872287379178,0.10434904277110477,0.0,0.2315261491585011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572869356364493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849891607995364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566904225039001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036970586626604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107293241813295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13159769270840832,0.14813468593236295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19747292508402786,0.0,0.18388688612475704,0.0,0.11701078538260427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570070376151735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12942399684220038,0.0,0.0,0.18466410075618891,0.0966611615443399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089678487564654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010545344263065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681093453521666,0.14816567488302085,0.0,0.0,0.06741732281948531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539630369154804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834140650372031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640926530283647,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,33animator,2020/02/05,"How to get over intimacy issues? I'm 19 and never had a girlfriend but not because I didn't had the chance to get one it's because whenever a girl likes me and tries to come closer to me I start ignoring and treating her bad because I'm scared that she is only playing with me or will break my heart, oddly this makes them want me more but soon they'll loose intrest.
I just can't let anybody get close to me and I feel like I'm not worthy of love.",2.7362002945508124,3.58307378350516,4.1689248895434465,89.85453608247423,74.05154639175258,6.7799705449189975,25.19734904270987,6.868970318607317,0.8142854197349045,355,11,80,3,7,118,69,97,0.22899999999999998,0.6729999999999999,0.098,-0.9457,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,2,0,3,8,0,1,3,0,8,2,1,2,1,19,20,8,0,1,6,0,1,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,1,1,1,0,1,5,3,0,1,3,1,14,5,8,14,1,8,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,5,50,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984339510339984,0.4346211238268408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20472075384979946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016669135563003,0.16978245040162596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.372498451902553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28162509088073817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480525165042254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430207308101565,0.0,0.232214742508557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21449502712593507,0.0,0.1586381191601681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18329599087559265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610427634639262,0.1807491154889186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23793645590428786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682150876942658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16135373288068114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14017645597691175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AvlevMaster,2020/02/05,"My brother thinks there are people in the walls My brother has been addicted to drugs since he was a kid. When he was 18 he went to jail for the first time. He's had the shit end of the stick in all of it when courts would refuse him to go into treatment and rather put him into jail. He's now 28, and is constantly thinking people or objects are behind walls. He destroys drywall, rips up the floors and is constantly looking for the next dent in the wall to look behind. Is there any way to help him? Like any sort of meditation?",3.505833333333332,4.710303657407408,3.9879629629629636,90.51583333333336,72.6111111111111,6.881481481481483,24.61111111111111,7.1686216300943375,0.8149777777777779,417,12,90,4,8,131,68,108,0.05,0.867,0.083,0.5803,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,6,3,2,0,8,0,11,3,1,0,1,13,17,6,0,2,2,2,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,2,0,1,5,2,5,1,18,11,1,23,0,0,2,0,14,10,1,2,10,55,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22173087969910985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766315330225816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4395960847835274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23587395344266365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801478489727875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17300792300204412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115594226031683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363315701655126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936866091413167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3416016210122662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21631318992289167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28201735742980644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20446843660801464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20878233414935896,0.16825067913559386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606549679844451,0.0,0.0,0.11860142462134927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16144570761538066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18854946418486174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14448617266828026,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,B4BaD00k,2020/02/05,"Depresion How do you guys deal with severe depresion episodes. I have bipolar type 2, and I've fallen into a severe depresion episode after a short hypomanic episode. I am in therapy, but right now everything feels so hopeless and like I'm never gonna bounce back.",4.040204081632652,6.859435061224495,5.089142857142857,76.03085714285714,75.93877551020408,8.817959183673471,32.248979591836736,9.3871,3.7088661224489794,214,11,35,6,5,70,40,49,0.20800000000000002,0.721,0.071,-0.7188,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,1,1,8,6,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,4,5,0,9,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,5,20,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22505534955476172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30174357446425915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26304482875863033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479894430880167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28980242866998496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429902497646594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257353623032432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499498924893752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6612975169526967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33470879886245475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sa_m01,2020/02/05,"Looking for some advice Hello, lately I’ve been feeling like a piece of shit. I constantly feel worthless and feel like I’m stuck in life. I’ve been looking for a job and haven’t had much success, part of that I blame on my bad social skills. Since I was 16 I felt like a burden and haven’t had many friends, now that I’m 22 I’m still in the same position. I’ve isolated myself for a long time. I have absolutely no friends and don’t really talk to anybody about my feelings. Growing up I had some family problems, my dad kicked my brother out when he was young and my grandmother blamed me for the situation. My dad was also at time not so nice with his words. I also just discovered that my brother was sexually abused when he was young. My thoughts at night have been fucking with me. I’ve been watching the Netflix documentary our planet lol to kinda remind me of the nice things in life. In my mind Ive made up a fantasy world, as pathetic as that sounds. I’ve been looking into setting up an appointment with my school therapist. I didn’t before because I thought I could deal with the problems myself and also felt that I was taking somebody’s spot.",4.071115618661256,5.347813068965515,5.041835699797161,83.22202839756595,71.32758620689657,8.045030425963489,29.164300202839755,8.4952907291091,2.105193407707911,920,36,182,15,17,301,126,232,0.17800000000000002,0.727,0.096,-0.9641,1,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,1,0,0,2,10,15,2,0,11,1,22,4,1,1,0,32,40,14,0,3,2,4,6,3,2,0,2,1,0,0,6,12,0,0,8,2,0,1,6,7,0,0,21,11,29,8,28,18,6,27,0,1,4,1,14,13,2,3,15,118,35,3,0.0,0.14993069309368848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365464828374825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30358498386463795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565666095278467,0.07713837355588245,0.0,0.1076772864350788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13674614031568144,0.0,0.10103289408006556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045847584201614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929183181725606,0.0,0.2559322394221622,0.18080219341844464,0.2429988951545281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19553091694699512,0.11698534970469285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125572668358402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274404557811685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17875965908409197,0.18546499368896652,0.0,0.0,0.11198502723317838,0.31878834786718296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973639360145302,0.0,0.1282929695070189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777059307210006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302238126823896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875039417121515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703184607120167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421657794580937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106556719854366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806650415040402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298927781628576,0.10467623244922383,0.14223767068618295,0.0,0.12899287211996507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105600842090827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514327429942676,0.10170906618107334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692414835735484,0.08406838595507082,0.0,0.0,0.2009192408002507,0.14757444494436026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kabb07,2020/02/05,Update on mental health:The other day i spoke to my mom in a serious converstaion about my depression and trama for the first time. Long story short it went well.  She even talked to me about things that she has expeienced and mental health and trama wise too . she was surprisingly supportive.  I tried doing so when i was a teen before but i guess I never spoke this stuff to her like i did the other day . she even told me she would help me find a psychiatrist even if I needed the help.  I honestly really greatful and hopeful for the future.  I tried to even email psychiatrists and they got back to me.   I pray that someone learns or reads from this and thinks that they should reach out.  It dosnt have to be a family member or any such. It can be a friend or a therapist online.  Or the suicide line or something . i also pray that whoever is on thier journey that they find peace and the coruage to get out and do things and be a better you. I hope you all have a good day/night ❤❤,2.8215795759928324,4.68783159390863,3.9639295312033447,87.28309346073458,75.7005076142132,7.071842340997312,20.725291131681093,7.928766900206844,0.803669692445506,772,18,158,12,17,251,113,197,0.045,0.708,0.247,0.9917,0,0,1,0,0,1,15.0,0,2,3,2,13,14,0,0,14,0,15,1,0,0,2,30,27,19,1,6,7,1,0,1,1,2,1,2,0,0,15,11,0,0,4,1,0,2,1,2,1,1,8,2,29,12,17,14,1,18,2,1,0,0,20,6,0,9,11,120,44,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414752376680747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856311057792388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014136965583394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108189470248265,0.0,0.0,0.11518077144761908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25196911566048746,0.0,0.11216975132837904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34407146823401663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277236572655965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23806175549845066,0.11077637931056993,0.0,0.0,0.10061792530372354,0.0,0.06804152459717368,0.0,0.0,0.10923351401123274,0.10415946785726392,0.14358267412899112,0.14346666369622066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768638179827829,0.0,0.0,0.1745852729355287,0.0,0.0,0.258702106552665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636254125360328,0.0,0.0,0.11525237319209072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26248907244034564,0.0,0.0,0.15252766813965168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656634251977546,0.1004439503683168,0.0,0.0,0.12221513075342508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13026854399220025,0.0,0.08343078744215336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034625332390932,0.10025995774197942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490859716137548,0.1424540935863618,0.1477872066532772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467659420318573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121090020501446,0.17304243667460406,0.08344824069787887,0.0,0.0,0.07594008512820148,0.0,0.0,0.12444350014188163,0.0,0.1768397252966636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709537799992402,0.1207275747891626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251400046253838,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RandyWilliam123,2020/02/05,"Feeling strong combinations of emotions? Last few days I’ve been having strong feelings sadness, fear, especially happiness, anxiety and just an overall feeling of weirdness and uncomfortableness. 

I don’t like it, is this just a phase. Idk what I’m doing here.",5.663636363636364,9.167196272727274,5.8101818181818174,69.08027272727276,74.9090909090909,8.065454545454546,36.07272727272728,8.841846274778883,4.10295090909091,212,12,30,5,5,67,37,44,0.205,0.506,0.289,0.6823,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,3,7,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,9,2,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,1,4,2,8,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,19,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726922368978575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298883173401507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4009714518242623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4011185325155862,0.5407132619330748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794601248331315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905638746772294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741491887564123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kairosmarx,2020/02/05,"Personal Help for People with Mental Illness hi, so I'm making this program for a project of mine in school. its about people with mental illness who needs assistance, some help with house chores and cooking. i need some help with the details. also this is not an official or a real program. this is program is made from my project. this is more so like an agency but not really. so the personal help is for any person with mental illness, meaning that any one who needs help, gets help. the people who can act as the personal help should be 16+. they will also have to undergo two to three weeks worth of training, and how to deal whenever problems arise. so can anyone please add more details for my project. any sort of detail/advice to make it better is useful. this is not an official or real program. this is just a program i made because of a project.",4.269972027972031,6.028919260606062,4.8072727272727285,83.2032167832168,71.54545454545455,7.258741258741258,29.055944055944053,7.882392219407189,1.9873356643356639,678,27,123,9,13,216,88,165,0.057999999999999996,0.752,0.19,0.9740000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,1,9,3,0,0,11,0,14,4,0,6,0,32,25,13,0,5,7,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,4,12,8,1,0,1,1,1,1,3,1,0,3,2,0,6,2,21,20,4,3,0,0,0,0,17,1,0,5,2,87,18,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729840770903673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756191447991604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22400980615641053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677694439762965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693500625078293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711199962963114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320226877258364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736763548666835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5151913519634272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266981402838903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05364429288828199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20779686904737146,0.14658896563659207,0.0,0.0,0.11960786521760106,0.0,0.0,0.33196737248632124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442530250792773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744054841434439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22837112197703474,0.3835036452931258,0.0,0.12053093075111375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506682481456807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.249960141319692,0.07034273600838704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112669169273033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726176285744464,0.0,0.0,0.09483470243216603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807749682219493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theflameinthewind,2020/02/05,"Understanding depression Depression is not simply feeling sad as many believe but often manifests as having no drive, feeling helpless or stuck or not making an effort to improve things.


For me, my psychiatrist asked me to run blood work and turned out my hormone levels were abnormal. Underfunctioning glands can make you feel tired and cause your mind to go haywire. So it made sense. Hormone treatment and antidepressants together helped me. 


If you're having trouble, get whatever help you need. Take it from someone saying it from the other side.",7.952534562211982,10.359864161290323,7.101105990783412,67.81451612903228,63.301075268817215,9.61536098310292,35.86635944700461,9.957137785484203,4.140564976958526,449,21,63,10,7,138,74,93,0.213,0.706,0.081,-0.9179999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,3,0,2,2,5,0,0,2,0,5,3,1,4,0,21,19,10,0,2,6,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,4,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,3,4,8,0,9,16,0,6,0,4,0,0,7,3,0,4,0,41,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966082597204524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23694349410858145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21604278567155025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3622734923372761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31901197224216865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098765061340312,0.0,0.1195220739382342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28192813030249103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19899716767847184,0.2807625457335317,0.2132178596420287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21234969059263475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559396616850029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672442307155583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17819207979233773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812437254676187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971834454981194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417164723321339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287531641712785,0.0,0.2189365629895454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15310569242653213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PANCAKEPATTYS777,2020/02/05,Psychosis? What kind of experiences or paranoia would you have if you're experiencing psychosis have anyone that reads this experienced it before?,9.508260869565222,13.070809608695654,8.390652173913043,55.38858695652178,61.60869565217391,9.817391304347826,37.58695652173913,10.125756701596842,4.822582608695653,123,6,15,3,2,38,20,23,0.10099999999999999,0.899,0.0,-0.3313,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,11,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205080263046488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39004527295389735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44838089962696015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4773293618877521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4585012866740337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3256180421420519,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,threeyearsAITA,2020/02/05,"How do you cope? Im going trough a break up and i feel like i depend on her love. So loosing her really fucks me up. I just want to be ble to be happy and not think of ll the negativity. Do you have any tricks/tipps?

Sry im kinda desprate im also Diagnosed with depression, anxiety, anger issues and mild adhs.
 I want to get through it without hurting me and others.",-0.2080519480519456,2.043415272727273,2.7376753246753265,89.14937012987015,91.07792207792208,5.6774025974025975,19.388311688311685,7.1686216300943375,0.5943880519480524,284,9,61,5,10,100,57,77,0.183,0.645,0.17300000000000001,-0.4395,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,0,4,7,2,0,2,0,5,3,0,2,0,15,13,7,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,1,10,3,10,11,0,5,0,2,0,2,5,3,1,2,1,39,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16412794114615345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13956818630849088,0.0,0.1570057302281921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767703127116529,0.20831121752919352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377398528054334,0.1466213416555671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18973828362856507,0.10722785276762034,0.0,0.1166409071207278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184785847578884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197104351018772,0.0,0.6650734814133871,0.21421408799823125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002684229679389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18523439013429788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148006669599896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150757159313833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421081801474637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19784112770249407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AwakenMyDonald,2020/02/05,Later on in the year I will be doing a research project on “How does music act as therapy for those suffering with mental health”. As I i am in need of primary sources would anyone who has or is suffering with a mental illness be down to do an interview with me discussing how music benefited them ? It will just be an interview via email or text and won’t be in person,9.488738738738741,6.201285891891893,9.975945945945943,67.47400900900902,61.7027027027027,13.65045045045045,40.88288288288288,11.855464076750405,4.70832072072072,292,12,56,7,3,100,54,74,0.12,0.88,0.0,-0.836,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,5,0,13,2,0,2,0,11,14,7,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,14,6,0,9,0,2,0,0,7,6,0,2,2,46,8,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22126563400472274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27692306724585997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33636613443554425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.637804067513229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23463988603939226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763074835963568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618823252180376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.224793379961894,0.0,0.0,0.20378014258574573
mentalhealth,ItsNotGayIfYouLikeIt,2020/02/05,"Reasons to be hearing voices? So over the past six months or so I’ve been hearing voices sometimes. The frequency has been increasing slowly. It started out once every like 1.5 months and now it’s like every 2-3 weeks that I hear voices 

Initially it was just sounds. Sometimes multiple sounds and sometimes single sounds. Not like tinnitus. They were always really loud and hurt my ears

Sometimes it was screaming. Eventually I heard a voice say some random sentences that made no sense without context

And then again with a voice that told me to run until I die because “they” knew what I was doing. I knew this was fake and was not affected by it 

And the most recent was when I had a conversation inside my head with two different voices. I kept wanting them to get out but they refused to leave and I felt like I was going mad. Luckily it passed after twenty minutes or so",3.3137987243090024,5.963725759036144,4.070042523033312,83.27442593905033,77.55421686746988,6.556484762579732,25.42735648476257,7.724431198458867,1.6680805102763998,700,26,122,11,17,223,105,166,0.11,0.8,0.09,-0.5203,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,4,0,7,8,1,0,6,0,14,2,2,3,0,30,28,16,1,1,7,0,1,4,0,0,0,17,0,0,11,11,0,2,4,0,0,4,4,4,0,2,18,18,16,4,13,9,4,19,0,1,0,0,12,3,0,5,16,86,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254023565607993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244817104563619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036989423252458,0.14130922265221932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22791075381225634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986282668435473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066342244545942,0.0,0.07686664874429436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13880724762637478,0.0,0.4573154320953609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447897247828494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14321200427655476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26430856339083675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797841340132055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159132071658788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14403862904299644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911303617445355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866456919195356,0.13906125701826366,0.1335447208060742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075575675131434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5350694943719306,0.0,0.0957318378859961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923877989475033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13212124217324056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977494731866808,0.0,0.10849074243842123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037779665535754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Relyt3214,2020/02/05,"What to do when the depression is winning. Hello reddit, I come seeking advice. Since about Seventh grade, I've been depressed, (I'm 18 now) so its been a long struggle. At this point, I don't fear death or even want to die necessarily, just reached a point of indifference because I know on one hand that killing myself won't be the right way to do things, my family would struggle with the idea that it might be their fault when it really isn't but I can't talk to them about it because they don't understand. On the other hand I'm not really living a life, more or less just a corpse who is numb. I've hit a crossroad where, I'm hoping I get hit by a car or something like that (ex if a train was coming at me 100 mph, I wouldn't jump out of the way.) and I always find myself thinking things like maybe today is the day that happens because I know in the end it would be less painful for my family. I feel like I can never attain my goals, I dropped out of HS (I'm almost done with my diploma online) but I can hardly ever get the will to get out of the bed in the morning and I don't know how I would go to college or even work a job for that matter. It's not that I'm lazy, It's that I can't fathom the idea of trying to be normal again. It's been such a long time since I've felt anything other than anxiety or sadness, but most of the time it's just nothing, I feel nothing and I want to be nothing. Sorry for my rambling just had to get this out and any ideas for help or recovery would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.",3.582640958223781,3.82867211656442,4.906617002629275,87.53416155419225,71.69938650306749,7.559217061057553,25.953257376570267,7.2636822038024595,1.0279429155711366,1194,34,269,11,21,399,161,326,0.1,0.757,0.14300000000000002,0.9193,1,0,1,0,0,2,31.0,0,1,3,4,17,17,1,3,21,0,33,5,2,1,2,56,60,18,3,10,16,1,6,3,0,8,3,0,1,0,24,12,0,0,12,0,0,5,11,10,0,1,7,6,29,7,35,37,4,35,0,3,0,0,9,14,0,11,16,179,53,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403360732816908,0.0,0.0,0.09635917911579492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007001726137622,0.0,0.0,0.06543884045602391,0.0,0.07361471982142638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918805069232633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598043331721974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16578507116404767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205957405950381,0.0,0.16576333900808984,0.0,0.09987023564197232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847540706036076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523009809199024,0.0,0.0,0.12711634544173395,0.08704440111337246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18143177674682104,0.10828408143271416,0.0973122807693334,0.06874582838555605,0.09239467745565927,0.0,0.0879513215778316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20110217192886012,0.0,0.05468900838797281,0.0,0.0,0.10609252140380933,0.0,0.0,0.08509475364225465,0.0,0.08620204640630204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450009347598093,0.0,0.0,0.09557684777479504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3258915905832696,0.0,0.0,0.09549217236434687,0.0,0.10646283915800996,0.0,0.1586543904888949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796920221655799,0.1410374994529158,0.0,0.08497173707762005,0.17031880683231876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667469955785762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020834822321592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421753368906063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428373020387223,0.2770022031297585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520708208438453,0.0,0.10239415997228288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819345192152236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329318500491865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217881495007913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15920281000898093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408158245562486,0.0,0.1077201918396566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011983371990995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734501309679277,0.0,0.08859449157625003,0.0,0.0,0.12786019293786746,0.061659488626019186,0.0,0.0,0.11222349988596676,0.0,0.09121359020918694,0.0,0.0,0.06533299527568799,0.0,0.0,0.10017750809743084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351640365053822,0.15276378347063374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700556660495035,0.0,0.0,0.2734325331037166,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shelsss,2020/02/05,"Sudden increase in touch and sound sensitivity? So recently I've noticed I've become extremely sensitive to particular noises and materials. For example, I can't shut the blinds because the noise irritates me, I can't pull back wrappers or lids from food, I can't fold my clothing without that 'nails on a chalkboard' feeling and even my feet on my sheets at night are causing me distress so I have to wear socks.

I have never experienced this before and its very new, I'm quite sensitive to touch from others due to trauma but I've never had this. It's only been the past few weeks and it seems to be getting progressively worse, even if I avoid my triggers I'll find myself thinking about them and its making me struggle with day to day tasks.

Anybody experienced anything similar to this before? I don't think I'm on the spectrum, as it's only a short term thing that has recently emerged? Advice to cope with this? Thank you!",4.693266452648476,6.547661039325843,5.5438523274478335,77.96146067415731,70.62921348314606,8.231781701444623,30.69181380417336,8.841846274778883,2.661109470304976,747,32,133,14,14,244,114,178,0.1,0.861,0.039,-0.8857,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,2,6,5,0,3,6,0,11,4,2,3,2,23,20,12,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,13,8,1,1,5,0,0,2,7,4,0,0,2,7,17,1,21,17,3,23,0,0,1,0,2,7,0,3,14,85,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16210864355181073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365157399358806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756141717387626,0.0,0.10112678557980627,0.1832156989689957,0.2823253163160637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17041772835591554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21397442161459165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21914142101246264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388044596330148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162312544081566,0.0,0.2005983799565074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667220484517305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073481371433984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558936970716487,0.16022041795606645,0.0,0.15567926954241798,0.0,0.0,0.18887019139791425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523380854318985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836356536695795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644754286924316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275984943024579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510226858223434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342730144552934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15273191429811175,0.0,0.0,0.11021188610309414,0.21259497210138334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687903448549568,0.0,0.0,0.1330692956413968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599148570492367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905906029902015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bannacremepie,2020/02/05,"Advice for first time therapy? I am *finally* making an appointment with a counselor. I am /incredibly/ sacred, and I honestly don't know how to start talking to a therapist. I have avoided it for a while because I feel like my issues should be something I should be able to work on myself, but as that has obviously not been working I'm taking what I see as a very vulnerable step towards improvement. Any advice of how to physically and/or mentally approach therapy???",6.329224806201553,7.842222697674417,7.699999999999997,65.3866666666667,66.2093023255814,11.314728682170546,37.58914728682171,11.20814326018867,4.994440310077519,376,20,59,12,6,129,65,86,0.055,0.8370000000000001,0.107,0.6394,0,1,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,2,3,0,1,5,0,10,0,0,3,1,13,17,7,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,1,2,9,2,12,12,0,9,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,6,46,12,2,0.20372323316690244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3981519712932028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853878452083104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418779204785706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300858788744216,0.14553991848026182,0.0,0.22316884402137446,0.0,0.1732868780597053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21263412646860366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196096112570746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995288812673619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359868400757386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20530510281642328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234104069810734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683609790853534,0.0,0.0,0.14419635299326014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15317451767231868,0.16374501792063836,0.0,0.0,0.4659505435643495,0.2365383756735983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879265555846398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680930029856562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29662588015500324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KaiZulu,2020/02/05,"Feel like my life is going nowhere I graduated from college with a degree in computer science and have been job hunting for about a year ago, but have had no luck. I feel like my life is going nowhere. I also don’t really have any goals in mind on what I want to do in life, nor do I have any close friends to talk it out with.

My parents though are very supportive, and say to take my time finding a work, but that doesn’t really make me feel better. It honestly makes me feel really guilty. At my age (25), I really should be on my own, and the one supporting them.",4.5997069597069595,4.491021888888891,5.653357753357756,84.30076923076925,69.42735042735042,9.762637362637363,27.825396825396822,9.606745405546679,2.1102268620268627,439,13,98,9,7,146,75,117,0.053,0.723,0.225,0.9705,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,3,3,8,0,0,4,0,15,3,0,2,0,20,27,8,0,2,2,1,4,2,1,1,3,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,5,15,8,15,23,1,14,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,1,6,64,19,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898730598927253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538709961598193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132488832514038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867043920972302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31711648702964024,0.22402553329569236,0.0,0.0,0.14330572620370413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211376839977474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782178578286267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559260352139218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33224205304899085,0.1532020282618773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093207464129161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15831597344749926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062468202192722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17409978549612856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40178178328933584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468788212178407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35585309246705304,0.0,0.0,0.11788862934365822,0.12602406730480156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15404807353215086,0.0,0.09142710910857624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12937043331600842,0.09248042195009766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414698401119575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096938558757486
mentalhealth,Gaveon,2020/02/05,"I feel like I'm detached from my self 

Is this normal or is anyone able to tell me what this is called.

Most of the time i feel like i'm on autopilot, My thoughts feel detached from my body. Like it feels i'm observing from a distance. Sometimes i feel like i'm in full control, but most of the time i feel like i retreat to the back of my mind.
When people are talking to me i try to focus on what they are saying but i don't seem to absorb much of it, it feels like i'm hearing them from a distance.
When i'm talking to people, quite often it doesn't feel like my words are coming from me. It feels like i'm just saying what is expected.
I had a pretty good life. But when i try to look back i cant think of when i was truly happy. Even though i know i was.
Even now when i do things I think I enjoy, its like my body and subconscious feel happy, but my main consciousness doesn't.
When i listen to music from old video games i loved as a child, i find myself crying from happiness/nostalgia. But again the feeling doesn't seem to truly reach me.
And its not just happiness either, any emotion i feel seems to only affect my subconscious but not my main consciousness.
I know i love my parents, family and girlfriend but i don't seem to feel it as much as i think i should.
Are these feelings normal or is it something else?

Thank you for any insight,",2.5935849662704773,3.8602643639576013,3.8536733054930927,90.34519354320592,74.97173144876325,6.7002248634757455,22.75762929649856,7.1686216300943375,0.6420190812720845,1057,28,231,11,22,346,120,283,0.035,0.7190000000000001,0.245,0.9962,1,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,2,2,16,17,0,0,8,0,20,5,2,2,0,57,58,22,0,4,14,1,14,9,1,1,1,4,0,2,16,4,0,1,28,2,0,1,8,0,0,0,4,19,43,17,30,53,8,18,0,0,1,2,18,4,0,9,22,155,59,0,0.0749074385712254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187925382790716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05237702273369908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519839300206465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16641055515880704,0.0,0.0,0.07648886993493445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452612557121214,0.0,0.0,0.08401506186641505,0.0,0.0,0.08228230388815409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257555301368148,0.08426078612703526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895131341483143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061606649364162,0.0,0.5302563232163137,0.3745972235774816,0.0,0.0,0.06846404179142931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06282880551419265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23922108377168946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844261273765804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233433847997479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05290933913899768,0.329363916885256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290338247934353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521377578438612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756351592465552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013117262039783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678677088933634,0.0,0.0,0.07860275599304256,0.0,0.0,0.056970482491875175,0.0,0.0,0.08317584583565461,0.0,0.0,0.10386277235835396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620779473721129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967328145936611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913880343254538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27277167499441296,0.07814479513510783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057667405858464235,0.0740853721251866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041552336041708,0.06547240299025442,0.06896470530461764,0.0,0.0,0.04976517371039027,0.1439929860199157,0.07359617807038991,0.059468138983469476,0.08735825964109087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171446747291127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AT-Snow,2020/02/05,"Should I see someone? Sometimes, usually in social situations, I’ll be chillin and all of sudden I’ll get this cold sinking feeling in my chest but my skin will feel hot like I’m in a sauna. People who have seen me when I’m going through this say that it looks like I’ve just seen a ghost. I assume from what I’ve read online that it’s a anxiety attack but it’s never felt like an attack to me because whenever this happens I’m immediately able to recognize and start telling myself over and over in my head “calm down, everything is fine, you’re safe” until I’m eventually able to catch my breath again. I’ve never givin these things too much attention because I’m always able to calm myself down before it manifests into something much worse but when I told my best friend about it they reccomend I should get help anyways. What do you guys think? I just don’t want to go into therapy and have to pay a lot for something that isn’t that significant",6.06715849595431,5.9838359633507885,6.565064255116612,78.92085673488815,66.32984293193718,9.458543550690148,30.97620180866253,9.095868883498916,2.4413937172774864,763,26,150,12,11,249,114,191,0.092,0.713,0.196,0.9664,0,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,1,1,8,11,2,0,5,0,10,4,4,0,3,25,31,10,1,3,5,0,5,3,1,3,0,1,0,1,17,6,0,1,6,2,1,3,4,2,0,0,4,11,16,9,22,23,5,22,0,0,4,0,10,10,0,2,12,91,33,2,0.4162799283400204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545941595622405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615100192394876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157190097389687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16917358703031532,0.0,0.1180745195172958,0.0,0.14562003412073687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470851923575978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403224263873752,0.0,0.13323133753887698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720561333616332,0.0,0.14499272082481915,0.0,0.15772098430023115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13739419216457405,0.12270498861516818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14240776774636485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930078870540088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20337334587556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165234323422043,0.0,0.0,0.11796876958785835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040090967415727,0.0,0.2140404957195844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619869592661948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879752653353492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034750242295917,0.0,0.0,0.11057373564766236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15597202696648838,0.0,0.1414483211917107,0.11757087746769082,0.2136484176222416,0.13723716445949535,0.0,0.09821502528669968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128233521657936,0.0,0.15868412573743476,0.0,0.09218596239629784,0.08891178981116224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259110360443535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15282450982708012,0.0,0.08184422905866158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140827025590105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vcw86,2020/02/05,"Depressed and lonely...*Looking for some advice* Hi, hmm this is weird to post something like this about myself. [Sorry, LONG POST AHEAD.] But at the same time, I feel like this is one of the only places I can rant/open up without having to pay someone to listen to me. 

I constantly feel like nobody wants to ACTUALLY hear what I have to say. I mean, most of the time when someone asks me how I am, I'm 100% certain they don't actually want to know. Like it's actually just code for ""I'm just asking to be polite. Please don't actually give me an honest answer"".

Even immediate family members, most of the time I feel like they don't really want to listen. Especially when we're having family dinner, when I'm talking to someone, I'll literally be mid-sentence, and they'll just decide to opt out of the conversation and immediately start talking to someone else...

And as for friends...what friends? Most people on my Facebook are just there. We don't ever have any kind of conversation. We just see what the other person is doing, whenever we log in. And when I take the initiative at times and ask a 'friend' to do something, I'm always given the ""Oh for sure! But not this week, I'm SUPER busy."" answer. And then nothing ever happens after that. But then literally that same week, I'll see them hanging out with someone else I know. So clearly they have time, they just don't want to spend any on ME. And believe me, I've tried to follow up on the invite, and try to invite them to something else, only to be given the same if not similar answer. 

I honestly have no idea what I did to drive them away, I feel like I'm the friendliest I can be when I am around them. I ask them questions, how they're doing (I actually want to know), what they're up to these days etc. Like what did I do that was so bad, that they want nothing to do with me?

All this means, is I spend a LOT of time alone. Doing things by myself, which is nice a lot of the time, but I don't want it to be because nobody wants to hang out with me. You know? Anyway, I guess what I'm doing right now is, looking for some guidance and advice for anyone who's gone through or going through something similar. What did you find helped you get through it, or cope with it better?  

For anyone who made it through the entire post, thank you for giving me a few minutes of your time.",3.6825959621136586,4.75267301483051,4.8991176470588265,84.66432701894318,72.02966101694916,7.332602193419743,25.32303090727817,7.618777277803332,1.1929090727816547,1821,54,375,21,34,603,197,472,0.04,0.86,0.10099999999999999,0.9765,0,3,4,0,0,0,78.0,3,5,11,3,23,21,0,0,18,0,40,1,0,3,6,82,89,29,0,9,16,0,4,7,2,1,0,4,0,1,27,21,1,0,17,0,3,6,10,3,0,1,8,11,50,18,68,75,13,51,0,1,3,0,41,16,0,12,33,259,77,1,0.0,0.0,0.3208339340962092,0.0,0.0,0.1285088324841284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810170414269953,0.0,0.0,0.05471290918008332,0.0,0.0,0.08943046241723418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195397859950967,0.0,0.0,0.0585353363132285,0.2458858654184793,0.0,0.061778401741519724,0.0,0.05490215827575271,0.04008325794046945,0.0,0.0,0.07408266594064437,0.0,0.058154403029188464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105712192215513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04240613347426081,0.0,0.05663414860353622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647880338272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333351179690517,0.04343014589814859,0.1189571971042394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12397474938872464,0.0,0.13298955494062534,0.1878997604154569,0.0,0.0,0.06009830938399744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160333719825024,0.0,0.03435394809752572,0.12615518014291685,0.03736972778852305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243585953613196,0.0,0.05814637846938589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410996181948576,0.0,0.044073772894770255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422868804074517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847306514287335,0.14454754400771372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22486987071805387,0.0,0.0,0.0581905545209111,0.11043423212027664,0.0,0.0,0.11180403994064607,0.0,0.062218381440356685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325158633028226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618619637234385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044556867626680575,0.10001833350659516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04558580579925283,0.0574141857767245,0.06869932891295988,0.07217856033359589,0.0,0.0,0.18892355107983047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365995089369573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04212393767617742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05615387872608125,0.0,0.05229051981871671,0.0,0.0,0.1047954505241366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785673514731524,0.20248372768949705,0.0,0.07360664171890033,0.04654128651290057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06197272219985402,0.0,0.04943910830945875,0.10570175508475828,0.0,0.06053779600975837,0.0,0.0,0.04368428634854296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30673524833090343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928581157446078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102690817766324,0.0,0.10548839005549876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633848730271303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aitaaccountdbhsja,2020/02/05,"My therapist wants me to write a letter to my future self and im stuck This is my throwaway because I dont want this on my main, but basically I need advice.

I've been depressed pretty much as soon as I hit puberty and have never really pictured myself having a future or a dream or a goal of someone that I really wanted to be. I don't really have anything I'm passionate about and never really pictured my life past 30. Ever. Right now, I'm kind of just coasting and my therapist wants me to write a letter to my future self but I don't know what it should say. Does anyone have any advice on how to get started?",3.5643923611111106,4.443899640625002,5.7207291666666675,79.37913194444445,72.125,8.501388888888886,25.159722222222207,8.841846274778883,1.855143055555556,486,14,95,9,9,171,75,128,0.057999999999999996,0.8490000000000001,0.09300000000000001,0.746,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,5,0,11,2,0,1,3,22,23,11,0,6,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,5,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,1,16,2,13,18,2,13,0,1,0,1,7,3,0,2,10,67,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990179941755333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404466748810626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698056198075416,0.0,0.12590526277511316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932668607884208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177794233995554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389058582302907,0.0,0.17931386246685424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839648910998534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993574024105482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16526533507634875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15932506893330745,0.08408433069673323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806782324949707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247197839434656,0.11344692990624343,0.2360047507154385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605499937879404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15565513812711212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3920606889728425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13066043677521352,0.0,0.12167106375758065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31922295934724737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963568195295908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082935847320465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35528760744159393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36097144723103575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatonegirlfromWV,2020/02/05,"Dissociation/Depersonalization tips? I have been dealing with disassociating and depersonalization for many years, but I have no insurance and can not afford to seek professional help for the many things going on in my head. However, these two particular things get to me the most and I guess my question is, how do you all deal with dissociation and depersonalization? I do have a grounding technique where I will rub something in between my thumb and pointer finger (usually something with a satisfying feel to it), but I'm curious to see what tips anyone can offer to help me out as my technique just doesn't work all the time. Thanks in advance! ((I have tried the 5,4,3,2,1 grounding technique but it's hard to keep up with when I'm having anxiety))",9.460190476190476,9.189701918518523,9.412910052910053,61.92666666666669,59.444444444444436,11.862433862433862,39.285714285714285,11.20814326018867,4.455349206349206,609,27,103,14,7,200,84,135,0.032,0.835,0.134,0.9447,2,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,6,0,13,2,2,1,2,23,22,11,0,0,5,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,1,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,5,13,1,20,20,3,15,0,0,1,0,7,9,0,3,4,76,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796063805355042,0.0,0.0,0.13523906999849067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.398801220096382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779557123904184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105046159493894,0.0,0.10992123036302333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130665454047036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17326031829962724,0.0,0.19849783607911647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592817036693265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719146196518495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39218143887519735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166671503880098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541253514508903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977980011264159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17806897225786195,0.0,0.0,0.2569903923376824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278084524405955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13131492845982126,0.0,0.18893668104467184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130174145735911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408071792312113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455181796043326
mentalhealth,CesarV1997,2020/02/05,"Exhausted from my mother. Hi I am a 22 year old Hispanic male, born in the northern Mexican city “Mexicali”. soon to move out to college. I little background about me, My parents got separated since I was about 7 years old, I have lived with my mom ever since, I moved to the imperial valley when I was 12, I always been very close to my mom, and we were always really close through my childhood. When I was 15, my mom had my brother with another man. At 19 It didn’t work out and they separated, so my mom was left single. before I begin the ranting I wanna clarify that my parents are wonderful, the most hardworking people I ever met in my life, (I see my dad every month, because he lives in LA). The issues started when I got my very first  ever girlfriend at the age of 20 years old. I dated this girl for roughly 4 months and I and my mom were close still and she would give advise about dating and all the good stuff, fast forward... been bf and Gf for roughly 6 months know her for 10 months, I was hella in the honey moon stage, you know first girlfriend, so I ditched my mom and my brother a lot when she needed help with the babysitting cuz I’m my household it’s only me, my lil bro and her, I know I fucked up, I lowkey turned my back on my mother when she needed my help. However I one time she exploded and she told how I was obsessed with my girl and that it wouldn’t last cuz it’s my first one, and that I dumb and Immature for behaving like this. Fast forward a little more and I fixed all this and I was the “Ideal son” However the issue know is that I can only see my girl when ever she wants basically, I can’t go out Thursday, Saturdays and Sundays cuz it’s supposed to be our family days, as a result I and her Invite my girl to our family events a lot, like a lot... like she is always here, basically but whenever my mom gets pissed she complains that my girl is always here, however she is the one that invites her too, and on the other hand she shits on me If I start to go out too much. I am exhausted of all the shores she leaves me, pick my bro from a shoot everyday, I cook for my bro, I help with his homework, I take him to his gym classes,  I clean the house, I try to be a good son, I have good grades, however I always find her raising her voice and shitting on me for forgetting little details, and I having mental issues and being a mommy’s boy for almost all my life is very rough, I take everything she says to the heart, it has come to the point where I get nervous every-time she is gonna her here from work. if some of you took the time to read all this, thank you, it helped me a bit mentally. Sorry for my poor English if you guys read everything let me know what you think and if you didn’t get something just let me know in the comments.",3.3933782608695644,4.157157744347828,4.791902173913043,86.31046195652178,72.42608695652173,7.906521739130435,25.505434782608692,8.158263871857827,1.3652130434782608,2153,64,466,31,40,720,252,575,0.07,0.8590000000000001,0.07,-0.4474,6,0,1,1,0,0,62.0,3,6,1,6,26,18,5,2,29,0,36,11,5,6,9,80,71,40,0,11,6,19,4,3,5,3,4,2,2,9,20,36,1,0,9,4,1,8,4,10,0,6,19,9,111,8,53,44,14,79,0,0,2,1,79,27,5,11,50,321,131,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059657597909083336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478635111976347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062471509775685774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04581091135373621,0.0,0.03631748778214063,0.0,0.05069550152865282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504247738464179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05132017108068289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038422132168662096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21556264507476866,0.050196055970808416,0.0,0.10708764182819996,0.0,0.11232748228464537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054452151070708894,0.15202808519971356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055077827192088084,0.09337931753101188,0.05715153219704167,0.06771778054554575,0.14991067660918986,0.09529808040494424,0.0,0.0,0.058990436779942985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059884048305301,0.1597323961037198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874367269856352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865482225607275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19645123424978872,0.04856307499857992,0.0,0.06308326976338588,0.06473040935821672,0.12184270765708725,0.08416176586900642,0.08731870185769795,0.17913493074566506,0.10521487980135928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195029283431127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200788811878267,0.0,0.0,0.4884297124861052,0.19021465640297264,0.1266415017171987,0.04379583130214014,0.08835094171632883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18754761033300668,0.0,0.12111242290078257,0.09062174064070837,0.0,0.0,0.13230605743887108,0.0,0.0,0.041303078397773835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05631936932589065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918592169283974,0.0,0.03816644830024287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04737789322061741,0.0,0.0,0.0949500537028872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223095371721937,0.09856515292745104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04586516094429695,0.0,0.06669139308188822,0.08433758587227139,0.0,0.047578140190879886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820122645771576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958873625768289,0.0,0.0,0.054850348497305114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038174432508503886,0.0,0.0,0.06947946727630062,0.0,0.0,0.05692822230354109,0.06619205969835837,0.040448762620417036,0.0648024923766592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14747139348066632,0.03513996293456875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.064608539983942,0.08674529598082126,0.0,0.0,0.04232167673294805,0.0,0.0,0.11509659208696378
mentalhealth,o-loom,2020/02/05,"What may be my Problem? I have these symptoms:

1. Extremely Socially Inhibited Subconsciously.

2. Extremely Uncomfortable to Be Looked At and Look At Others.

3. Chronic Earworm.

4. Hypersensitive to Sensory Stimuli.

5. Extreme Social Burnout, Exhaustion.

6. Acute Persecutory Awareness.

7. Intrusive Thoughts.

8. Chronic Tinnitus.",5.886764705882353,6.059548166666674,7.390343137254902,47.10661764705884,140.25,11.129411764705882,48.65686274509804,7.928766900206844,8.607927450980393,264,22,26,12,17,89,43,48,0.185,0.815,0.0,-0.8304,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,4,7,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,4,3,0,2,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,1,0,14,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5419600441210188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3087726795798456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6578877471509039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335400562033673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561814163003046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hexa420,2020/02/05,"On a scale from one to ten, how much does music affect your mood (songs that have no sentimental value to you) I recognized that music affects my mood in a severe way. I hope that I'm just really infuelciable rather than something worse, although my suspicions appear to be coming true more and more day by day",8.201299435028247,7.410063932203393,8.480000000000004,69.29367231638419,62.22033898305085,11.256497175141243,31.53107344632768,10.504223727775694,3.1532666666666667,248,7,44,5,3,82,47,59,0.156,0.6890000000000001,0.156,-0.0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,3,1,10,6,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,1,6,2,8,5,3,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,2,32,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28546905433663466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4274471228297865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900076288129739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3291518610110428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436148259531945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245630915736802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123013168940787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3743841278012824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551254963897477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630474052823244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377217163053457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1smolphoenix1,2020/02/05,"Being shut out.. So I’m a freshman in highschool and I was considerably nervous about it because I didn’t really know anyone besides people who didn’t like me. Since I go to a really small school the drama can get pretty disturbing. But that’s not the point. This boy warmed up to me particularly faster than the rest and we quickly became friends. We’d sit together, talk to eachother, help eachother in our online classes, give eachother advice, and just support eachother. When October came around we became inseparable. We’d tell eachother how good of friends we are and how our friendship is like nothing else. This went on till December. Throughout October-December things moved very quickly. I’d go to outings with him, we’d call all night and play video games together, we’d send eachother cheesy photos of eachother, we’d make eachother our lock screen on our phones, we’d hug and hold hands. It was the most pleasant experience in my life, it felt like my inherited depression was at its lowest. I felt euphoric, we even stayed up and celebrated New Years together. Then New Years hit and things turned to shit. About a week into January we started fighting and he admitted to me that he doesn’t feel like hanging out with me as much.  Although it hurt he still expressed that he cared he just said his emotions were distressed. After our first fight we completely broke off. I apologized but it didn’t change anything. Everything died, our good morning and goodnight texts disappeared, our lock screens changed, we don’t hang out and etc. then he gets a girlfriend and he tells me he doesn’t care about anyone but her. Now we don’t even talk to eachother at school and I have to text him in order to get a conversation. Not even words can express the pain I am feeling. I cry almost everyday and it’s not getting any better. I don’t know what to do anymore I just feel like giving up to be honest.",4.6134726090993485,6.7693179470752085,4.7226824512534815,82.51724558960076,71.47910863509749,7.5721819870009295,30.351067780872803,8.344100000000001,2.343793240482822,1529,66,276,25,30,476,198,359,0.102,0.7440000000000001,0.154,0.9182,1,0,0,0,3,0,39.0,21,0,0,2,18,28,3,3,10,0,27,5,2,3,1,56,54,26,1,0,9,0,7,5,3,0,2,1,0,1,16,30,0,1,9,4,1,9,11,10,0,1,12,10,42,18,39,33,5,51,0,3,2,1,57,20,1,2,24,171,58,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766032434741274,0.0,0.0,0.10007558950128603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796270573296875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099113740012259,0.13976090516847986,0.0,0.0822421997282589,0.08896789146132526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060922566888166586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838891074295836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020500320510064,0.11430486795026977,0.2037912171245783,0.0,0.21144678153748292,0.0,0.1047853098162488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977952421260294,0.0,0.0,0.08607827516360045,0.0,0.10372206153284308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348714258803643,0.11241917853174664,0.0,0.0,0.11145964692357,0.1980285114827023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981973176821424,0.09776061010802264,0.0,0.0,0.15159817600774966,0.14279447717526375,0.1919163674494324,0.0,0.0,0.08500901131542529,0.0,0.0,0.1544269708743353,0.0,0.2088583421988778,0.1917433311423972,0.11359654168681127,0.16765005475708894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06698775287136895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698796081140297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984894780021223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059065926225999,0.24412846167595084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06671080324249598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622052667114773,0.07346748425808174,0.0,0.0,0.19304557291748076,0.0,0.09378702840617913,0.0,0.09589523636370617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634332935112678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928589255595392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447571278713852,0.0,0.0,0.10167502673375184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280483943935533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506593603707868,0.0,0.0,0.2022894651670206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258709253421916,0.08267149641636179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707381282443306,0.10652286582484304,0.07981230545409157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341085889295527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16065615858650356,0.17470413222983902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279154408972982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870614729795126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246106198490173,0.0,0.0,0.08016593247766653,0.0,0.0,0.09264548846250764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871631562331914
mentalhealth,BlitheBadger,2020/02/05,"Interested to know opinions on Peer Collective So my therapist recommended this service called Peer Collective as a way of getting more support in between sessions since his schedule doesn’t allow us to meet more than once a month.

Has anyone used this service before? Did you find it helpful? Was it worth it even though it isn’t a licensed therapist?? 
 It is a video chat with a “peer counselor” who is not a therapist but a peer there to offer emotional support. Typically you can meet with the same person at the same time and I’m thinking about doing it once a week. It’s $14 for a half hour. 

If you want to take a look it’s called Peercollective.org",3.922272727272727,6.115558658730159,4.704256854256856,81.7372077922078,73.52380952380952,7.756421356421356,29.708513708513703,8.575989854853784,2.426073015873016,525,23,97,10,11,169,85,126,0.0,0.845,0.155,0.9257,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,3,0,0,5,3,0,0,12,0,9,0,0,2,0,15,19,6,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,11,3,0,0,3,2,1,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,6,3,15,17,4,9,0,0,1,0,14,3,0,2,5,66,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971047612031992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13351320120631735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32043174279425984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764951591706598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363318818890664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434068266966712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819755286241068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051690135075869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15451820188626975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622998219673406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175930362584745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12523876343528642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341939110635299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370019601883443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297920791581122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3561041426101655,0.0,0.0,0.117971798375752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5465306759990506,0.0,0.1005373363465826,0.15415675262395906,0.0,0.09149160985147256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18873542071081228,0.13551412391039375,0.0,0.0,0.09254566579273146,0.12454258235513994,0.12585840954810518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,taylen8,2020/02/05,Do I have OCD or borderline OCD? I've always had rituals/compulsions. When I was little I started paying attention to the positions the cracks on the sidewalk hit my feet. If the left had a crack hit my toes then the same had to happen to the right. If there was a big one on the right I had to get two little ones on the left. Lately it has progressed to many other things. I hope it's ok to list them off (haha). Pens being open or clicked to the open position must be closed. Spelling or grammatical errors must be corrected. Any calculation someone says has to be fact checked (I don't leave it alone until they understand what was wrong). When someone points out any detail and isn't 100% correct I must explain the right way (I spent 5 minutes showing my coworker that a cartoon phone in a meme only had the numbers 1 to 6). There are more that aren't as interesting. The compulsions only last 30 minutes max because I can easily fix them. It just drives me insane that i don't have a diagnosis. And I can't go to my doctor because I'm already on antidepressants/anxiety meds and I don't want to seem like a basket case. Ugh.,3.107279925477407,4.918969327433633,4.608239403819283,83.20962971588263,74.75221238938053,7.766744294364233,26.93898462971589,8.532816995589336,1.9740212389380527,892,34,176,17,19,298,134,226,0.054000000000000006,0.885,0.061,0.1301,0,1,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,3,1,5,7,0,0,18,2,28,3,2,0,6,26,41,13,0,7,6,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,10,7,0,0,4,1,3,2,6,2,0,3,9,2,20,5,20,23,2,29,0,0,1,0,6,19,0,7,8,115,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15319045183901306,0.1632226817678584,0.0,0.12307320916905927,0.0,0.0,0.2011681369553012,0.0,0.11315096612167735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803294784580943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15139244813314326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772770211518727,0.0,0.08406082574716968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307965799484676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14690829077141768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056662673569787,0.16684924834105014,0.1566156393319799,0.32140992322950124,0.0,0.0,0.07226149589463883,0.296489933708814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149957817455672,0.0,0.0,0.16429498692414146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004556793456982,0.224984879525998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982303179325306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789437355284017,0.0,0.11762419837749084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465197184672534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506478155104669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469166373782296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826502358848103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14448686000049887,0.15397982702893107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724132058693357,0.1174043026315631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16171668151089427,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jn8374,2020/02/05,"I'm a victim of cyber bullying and I'm becoming more and more suicidal, please help me So I am in desperate need of help. I got falsely accused of a crime. Someone online from yahoo answers found out my phone number and address and used some kind of spoofing app and called in a bomb threat to a local gas station in my area and made my number pop up. The police came and arrested me on charges of ""making a bomb threat, falsifying information about a destructive device used to cause harm or death"". I've tried reaching out asking for legal advice and this one troll named AJ keeps on stalking me and harassing me. She framed me as a troll also too online. She makes me want to commit suicide because of all the nasty stuff she said to me. I have a fiancee who I am engaged to in my native country and my wedding is next year and now I don't know what the fate of my wedding is now. I'm extremely worried about being on the no fly list. I have a suspicion that she was the one who did this and framed me for it in an attempt to ruin my life. She makes me look bad online and calls me an unemployed bum when I have a job. I am a personal banker. How come people like her take joy out of doing this ?? How come she won't leave me alone and keeps on stalking me wherever I go online ? Am I really on the no fly list automatically after my arrest ? How can I stop her from doing all of this to me ?? I really am confident that she is the one who did the prank call and framed me for it.",4.431357069143446,4.594062950980393,5.807392500859994,82.11168730650157,69.81699346405229,8.795046439628482,27.86996904024768,8.6894789155246,1.8851529411764707,1157,36,243,18,19,392,157,306,0.225,0.68,0.095,-0.9942,3,1,0,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,0,1,11,12,5,0,21,0,20,1,0,10,3,46,44,23,3,2,1,0,0,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,13,21,0,3,4,0,0,4,4,8,0,3,8,2,43,4,39,34,5,27,0,1,1,0,26,16,0,2,8,171,56,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447205227019957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13192492241786868,0.0,0.10186393180393773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908099117098518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063550914368516,0.07764828737576784,0.14067870509015346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3902007394049248,0.14568619952183445,0.0,0.13085202569662274,0.0,0.21944928658892798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13966311610003854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239170445643349,0.0,0.10187561400214762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17075722679778593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264027511828661,0.2264383740333993,0.0,0.1326443136835307,0.0700034741015924,0.0,0.0,0.13487463363584445,0.0,0.0,0.08997066401523426,0.062230329144257863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696521979990857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052789644272548,0.25507688952520685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444897942091156,0.0,0.0,0.13546767042355834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258943357387183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830768582267773,0.1112213284473506,0.0,0.13982250653068076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632028825070326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12116539893343285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079267448410434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649349334508404,0.0,0.0,0.14581703622057068,0.2786611442968873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577220732196813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864811234407259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200269377747948,0.0,0.0,0.0751306906657517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293582769484479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202708762925452
mentalhealth,whiskeyandfeet,2020/02/05,"Conditions like Body Dysmorphia? What's it called when you look in the mirror and don't see what others tell you they see? I thought it was body dysmorphia, but my research shows that to be when ""you can't stop thinking about one or more perceived defects in your appearance."" That's kind of close but not exactly what I'm thinking of. Any thoughts?",3.8369154228855713,6.122100477611941,3.5590298507462705,89.4351616915423,74.07462686567162,7.451741293532338,29.07711442786069,8.344100000000001,2.074753233830845,280,12,55,5,6,84,50,67,0.06,0.871,0.069,-0.3454,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,4,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,4,2,2,0,1,14,13,6,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,1,5,1,0,1,3,1,0,1,3,3,7,2,6,9,1,7,0,0,3,0,7,3,0,2,4,35,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447798593372714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5373198550682053,0.0,0.0,0.2469734474988601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25186746307683955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816409382912747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031075271928867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16389547026069742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854736780138997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022118043221245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114025883281168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099574635564196,0.0,0.38403107049646334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,keescarriere,2020/02/05,"not excited for future I am a 16 year old male whom lives in a rural northern community. I get high 90\`s to low 70's, have a fair amount of savings, a fair chance to get into to university, and a decent RESP. Even with all this going for my future, I dont feel any real excitement for it. All I see is a bunch of my opprotunities going away in terms of youth programs,  worsening political, socioeconomical, and environmental conditions, debt, and isolation going forward. Not to mention losing contact with most of, if not all of, the friends I have currently in high school. I am also worried if I will be able to cut it in university and a real job. I feel as if I have wasted a good chunk of the time I have as a child to really enjoy life and do things I will probably never get to do again. I am worried about how many people I have missed my chance to be a kid with. And with my parents situation I feel even worse. I dont want them to be lonely, and I am not sure about the quality of their pensions, and how they will deal with things if they get sick. I guess I am just looking for someone who can sincerely say that it will be okay.",7.204290752351098,5.378019969827586,8.402695924764894,72.38462382445142,64.81896551724138,11.539811912225705,34.02194357366771,10.436869588844218,3.2364,891,30,184,18,11,310,122,232,0.151,0.73,0.11900000000000001,-0.7044,4,3,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,4,1,9,14,1,0,13,1,24,2,0,2,5,39,39,17,0,5,9,1,3,0,1,4,2,1,0,3,9,14,0,0,3,0,1,4,7,5,0,0,0,6,26,9,35,31,7,24,0,4,2,0,15,11,0,6,11,136,35,4,0.13310029139327803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644025493939364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051276235090164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505210515765192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722055601228694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119851004673541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17582297433303076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018985196341772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028329549608983,0.0,0.2781576349641979,0.0,0.22693188868865616,0.11163820952012872,0.0,0.0,0.1466249768292314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28125553114017043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208150149594866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401267205432837,0.0,0.0,0.11752999581064448,0.0,0.11177072260537292,0.1489051803330792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494280455598218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265515009518474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13966636593828932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779212223471566,0.0,0.0,0.09227498316249304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435046259567299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30299454193540826,0.08526745489427956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058466939704547,0.0,0.13470460077541796,0.10606369968762376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496103042096445,0.0,0.0,0.11277544497075333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254454494609179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768518387073634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761185027561023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850600037339417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703396135035349,0.13564056800576502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571222379280202
mentalhealth,tacos_and_depression,2020/02/05,"What do I have? Any ideas of an illness that fits this description are appreciated. I am searching for things to research before I talk to my psychiatrist. I have a grouping of other people who live in my head. They live in their own elaborate world with it's own government, religion, etc. They dont communicate directly to me using words or conversations. But often I can get a sense of their opinion by feeling out their emotions when I need advice or comfort. Usually i interact with them by going to their world inside my mind and becoming them for awhile. I just sort of step into them and their lives. While this happens I talk to myself, make faces, and lose track of time. I have some memory loss and I have trouble remembering things in general. But I always remember everything about their lives. They just sort of live in their own world, doing their own thing and I visit about 4 times a day since I was a child. Sometimes to watch, sometimes to step in and become them for awhile. They never give instructions or communicate with me about my world directly. Any ideas about something that could encompass this are appreciated.",5.269786096256683,7.450106775119622,5.577911623979733,76.96891077962287,69.76555023923446,9.128173374613004,28.56206023079089,9.627879704456738,2.8396673796791454,912,34,159,22,17,290,116,209,0.052000000000000005,0.8959999999999999,0.053,0.0516,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,16,2,8,4,0,0,5,0,13,3,2,2,1,36,21,13,0,2,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,12,11,0,0,5,0,0,4,2,3,0,0,1,2,37,1,32,19,6,24,0,2,1,0,25,13,0,8,7,122,49,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188678103596236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121644694647254,0.0,0.0,0.16544237530596434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686895465014729,0.1035089537000933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712177471917624,0.0,0.0,0.07844945961244927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256430458194613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683163233166498,0.0,0.0,0.1356637330645167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932458922003573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061506189461511936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063553275033689,0.11669073431948315,0.06913233324262806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756821232270558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484047446013873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27463953855033896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5370635358920567,0.0,0.0,0.13608703397075247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119742753012117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282442138349553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901964992920166,0.09381832698518054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433171190012105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755948670696652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006240745546606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936464711360499,0.24061542422604015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195543542575507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424419566343235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186163948580355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506021165557937,0.13397221666960527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,invalidhuman-,2020/02/05,Psychiatrist appointment So I got a referral to a psychiatrist from my doctor and they called me Monday to make an appointment and I still haven’t called back. I’m super terrified of going and I really don’t know what to expect. It doesn’t help that the psychiatrist is also male and I have a hard time around them. I guess I was just wondering what to expect and what everyone else’s first time was like. I’m not sure whether or not to call them back.,1.9082417582417577,4.4026368021978035,3.6491098901098944,85.10839010989012,82.07692307692307,8.035604395604395,20.089010989010987,8.841846274778883,1.5390474725274723,363,10,74,10,10,121,58,91,0.085,0.81,0.105,0.4094,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,3,2,7,3,0,0,5,0,7,1,0,1,1,18,15,9,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,1,11,3,8,12,0,9,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,3,8,52,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851982327833974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764615663695356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3048443524444691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6072272212366645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20289087093645344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559088577709924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18941172038615645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860940554903955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265538246981385,0.0,0.15853800302030474,0.0,0.21836630726218015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775699504128926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13286550467924327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893883779013222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684233274529204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231619453472185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698750006688028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583021043284489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868239651524635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311722533359198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149656921437896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,apieceofgarlic_bread,2020/02/05,"Currently feeling mildly depressed and confused I've always viewed myself as a happy person without any of the mental health issues that many of my peers seem to suffer from. I now realize this was an overly optimistic and naive thing to believe. Recently, people have been spreading rumors about me. And they aren't typical playground rumors either... It's gotten to a point where I get anxiety from being in the same room as people who I think have heard these rumors. I don't feel comfortable anymore. This period of my life has really made me question the state of my mental health. I feel like I have a strong ability to ignore and block-off things that are troubling and I'm not sure if my behavior is healthy. I'm not clinically depressed, but I feel like if I continue feeling like this for extended periods of time (it's already been half a year), I'll start to develop severe mental issues :(. 

 I used to think that people were being overly dramatic when they said drama was suffocating, and that ignoring rumors would actually work. Now, I know that's not true. The anxiety and humiliation is causing me so much stress... and I'm trying to just focus on other, more important things in my life.

If anyone has any advice, please tell me. Does telling yourself that rumors are unimportant work? Does telling yourself that it doesn't matter what people in this stage of your life think of you work? How can I improve my mental health?",5.935753991720875,7.4850008052434465,6.375170510546031,74.38506209343583,67.16479400749064,9.216558249556478,29.78296865759905,9.549672527348893,2.9271842696629213,1153,42,190,24,19,373,150,267,0.142,0.75,0.10800000000000001,-0.8290000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,2,4,8,16,0,2,9,0,21,7,0,4,2,42,41,17,0,4,10,0,5,3,0,1,7,2,1,1,21,8,0,2,12,1,0,0,7,8,0,1,9,8,26,8,27,29,4,22,0,3,1,0,17,9,0,6,14,131,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.09220249879196067,0.0,0.0,0.0923284152068605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426515431007344,0.0,0.07861803890526947,0.0,0.0,0.1285043635770283,0.0,0.1445596018302129,0.0,0.09370247950440176,0.06606522642797223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645081755674232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706082561369496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627574100885287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536671158193347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388690841201545,0.2024976038014806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04936385340416242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057969596117858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012953855325539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19723294953909964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051925791411747614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20020997498145066,0.13847994540697914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940279736544267,0.0,0.0957916804678819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3808695401477826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945641882832186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620125091179266,0.08249955556653188,0.0,0.10371477133039446,0.08931767220171137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584341011844528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06052870192240471,0.0,0.09329129261831334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987567134465263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601444646475062,0.0,0.10673973015188268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687607602310534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823080258958508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904980484472498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477488545116351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883123914537998,0.1816240925684576,0.0,0.0,0.05509422741423795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414825598969208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160361340980701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107895171961512,0.0,0.20635585956109867,0.0,0.0,0.06711853656575853,0.0,0.0,0.06084442946600738
mentalhealth,Polkadot_moon,2020/02/05,"Normal for depression? I have a friend who suffers from depression and I'm having a hard time understanding it and not taking it personally. When he's in a depressive episode, he withdraws and wants to be left alone for weeks or even a month or more. I tell him I'm here if he wants to talk or needs anything, but he says he really just wants space and for me to not text and let him come to me. I'm trying to respect it, but it's hard. Is this normal for depression? Not having gone through it myself, it's hard to wrap my head around.",3.371554054054055,4.367835918918922,4.491520270270272,87.57349662162164,72.69369369369369,8.072522522522524,24.68581081081081,8.472884824447931,1.3276027027027024,421,12,93,7,8,138,64,111,0.174,0.7709999999999999,0.055,-0.8628,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,4,0,6,1,1,0,0,24,17,12,0,7,10,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,8,7,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,1,4,8,2,14,14,1,10,0,5,0,0,13,4,0,4,4,59,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16144397303207175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12827540514041205,0.13876565023063628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427623854782575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5370345470759442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295682599172194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043198211480607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4189117801243916,0.0,0.1599771616851929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936334593697272,0.15939717399767425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244213924107129,0.0,0.0,0.1155825465505147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054572901924711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610781663808807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998602890163724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396149814043815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720185521227612,0.1252898992188856,0.13624540330592852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089448968809102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583183150431584,0.0,0.0,0.16227587779730634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758249989938141,0.0,0.12503699440201355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MySenpai13,2020/02/05,"What were the first few days on antidepressants like for you? So I just got put on antidepressants by my psychiatrist. He gave me details on how to take them and sent me to the pharmacy with your classic prescription written in some sort of runic language only doctors understand. I took them as he asked the first time, half a pill of one type at night, one pill of the other type in the morning. He did warn me that there were going to be side effects such as drowsiness, loss of appetite, etc. but holy shit I didn't expect it to be so much. 

I felt extremely tired about an hour after taking the antidepressant and didn't know where it came from. Insert me falling asleep at 1am after weeks of not being able to sleep. It was weird, but pleasant to have fallen asleep. Until I woke up, or until a family member woke me up. I felt dead. Fatigue, dizziness, it was kinda like a high caused by deliriants (which I experienced slightly once after an accidental small pheramine overdose). 

It was 10am and my grandmother was asking me to take my other pill and get out of bed. I took the pill and lay back down, absolutely ignoring the breakfast she gave me. I was just not hungry, more so than usual. Everyone's already concerned I'm falling back into my ED again so of course she tried to convince me to eat it, but since a few months ago I'm genuinely just not hungry, food has lost its appeal even though I'm not trying to lose weight anymore, this time it was worse.

I fell back asleep and after a few times of being woken up and yelling at people who tried to get me out of bed I woke up again, confused at a very vivid and realistic dream and barely remembering the other times I woke up. 2pm. I had slept for 13 hours and was still tired as all hell. I got changed into some comfortable casual clothes, and the mere action of getting dressed was so tiring I had to lay back down for another hour.

The whole day I felt kinda drugged up, now it's 4.30am, I fell asleep at 10pm and woke up two hours ago but it certainly feels shorter than that. I'm fatigued, drowsy, dizzy and generally feel kinda shitty and disassociated from my emotions. This all feels fever-dreamish.

Is this normal?",5.2509412550066745,6.0302670046729006,5.590120160213621,82.20971962616825,68.20560747663552,8.357276368491322,28.369826435247003,8.418075326091056,1.8575237650200265,1730,56,341,24,28,552,225,428,0.145,0.7959999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.9905,0,0,1,0,1,0,47.0,0,2,2,6,23,17,2,1,19,0,22,22,7,3,3,58,60,31,1,2,12,0,7,2,0,0,11,1,2,0,21,20,4,1,10,2,0,12,6,10,0,6,35,10,37,7,65,21,11,71,1,5,1,0,15,27,2,8,34,226,58,3,0.0884263650068487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15676927447401828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758069264591766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927227537464777,0.0,0.0,0.08769519321371239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16533342919912264,0.0,0.0,0.2719776658259944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113620451540788,0.0,0.09083823502531302,0.09354336925966927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405538019752035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050813153042042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254650989507172,0.09048224706823106,0.0,0.09946775876935908,0.0,0.0,0.09861877143659062,0.0584047801181131,0.0,0.0,0.08449518119266608,0.0,0.0,0.08336050718350578,0.0,0.13413308118734746,0.0,0.25470953253711565,0.0,0.0,0.15043084180439198,0.1069255115649107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385973781573637,0.0,0.05025474101977336,0.0,0.14144528399630274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342730957406396,0.0,0.0,0.3483286295877878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048596817658536164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640131070824655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989264838544784,0.09652782307871216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058108091173505,0.0,0.0650035527479941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298215339268332,0.08663906301171495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417119280793804,0.11983998684190868,0.067252235232323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061303707578055026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889292035778093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016983386309894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076839295852032,0.07314720290650789,0.0,0.08849022547012847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706174093194616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994568650647298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687845465405121,0.0,0.20624849816593568,0.3048992955947715,0.0,0.0,0.1964898903010596,0.18010709214181894,0.0,0.0863797097583211,0.09205496449538476,0.0,0.0,0.09738914827229447,0.07296101188875974,0.0,0.0,0.07093029621238038,0.10767949037691073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872487864259873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011402041768786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kewlguy7777,2020/02/05,"My body health is prob 85-95% healthy, my mental health is probbaly 30% what are some simple habits i can do everyday to improve mental health, besides exercise and diet. I genuinely want to know. I have no reason to have all the negative thoughts i have and it angers and saddens me. Im a very logical person but i just cant control ir.",3.8991044776119423,5.247317119402986,5.1345074626865665,82.11758208955227,71.83582089552239,8.345074626865673,31.310447761194034,8.841846274778883,2.6433904477611936,265,12,51,5,5,88,51,67,0.126,0.797,0.077,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,2,0,9,6,1,2,1,13,12,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,3,1,1,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,8,0,3,11,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386129290867458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409351976527974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6850203271874626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320389010113993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805764153829044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43296942060133664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18756965841715412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22086734744166545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17054046621792507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17724627666686613,0.12670445661410018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,euphoni-uh,2020/02/05,"Why am I falling back into old habits? I’ve been clean for almost 2 years now and my life is really starting to pick up and become something great but as a high school Junior who is deaf and already playing an instrument at the collegiate level, in a pit orchestra for said University’s musical, high school jazz band, indoor percussion marching ensemble, my own high school musical, composing commissions, all high school AP classes and 4 college classes, and have a job all at once, I am so stressed but I absolutely love everything I’m doing and really couldn’t see myself dropping any of it, my grades are all As I’m getting my work done, but everything is just barely making it, I’ve caught myself thinking that I should start cutting again but I’ve been clean for pretty much two years now and really don’t want to ruin that but I keep finding my mind drift back to “that made things easier back then, it can work now” I haven’t done anything yet and I don’t want to back a part of me does, I think I’d feel better knowing I’m not the only one who’s felt like this",5.0834808853118725,5.856710953051647,5.855308517773306,80.1812323943662,68.5774647887324,9.278202548625083,29.298792756539235,9.424239791934726,2.5068567404426565,855,30,165,17,14,280,129,213,0.057,0.782,0.161,0.9712,1,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,11,8,1,1,7,0,18,3,0,3,3,35,38,17,0,4,7,0,2,1,0,1,2,2,2,0,10,9,0,1,6,4,0,3,5,3,0,2,8,5,16,5,16,28,6,30,0,1,1,1,5,10,0,1,17,101,26,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500899067660216,0.0,0.11572316385620103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131304615076248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862964727714845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3225445027513378,0.0,0.0,0.1158171840464152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274619665371103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176967697111224,0.2146303693486112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884951050066432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05302382439220472,0.0,0.10068861018263513,0.0,0.09584639047685152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05478859484612554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561605955113086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4431902894444452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406415589578742,0.09321046431224514,0.0,0.0,0.0576320718812194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407054924448486,0.051232640214812254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946464159329116,0.09922753807044718,0.06999942893796171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058856126111983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708919235885371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100401064023795,0.11167976041521598,0.0710604836765901,0.07975595608576039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356056679102128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668727496419714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015411458483648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975237758506303,0.0,0.0,0.4245233561462164,0.0835652930513923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073161553236495,0.0,0.0,0.14845057593577787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120124609081911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06966886772658405,0.13438887142184827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243966337157856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237063565916871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462601066488772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268861462996033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506161147361526
mentalhealth,johnlennon234,2020/02/05,"I'm scared my dad will see me differently if I'm bipolar Next month, I have to go for testing in a hospital to see if I have bipolar disorder. I'm scared that if I have it, my dad will see me differently. He was severely abused physically, mentally, verbally, and emotionally, by his father, and mother.

 His mother was bipolar**(she refused to take medication)**, and she was an alcoholic, she would have fits of manic filled episodes for a month, but then would get depressed for a month, she couldn't even leave her bed, she unfortunately committed suicide in the late 90s. 

I've been getting weird fits of rage, and manic anger for the past couple of months, but then I suddenly get depressed for a month, I haven't felt happy in a long time. My therapist suggested to my mom I get tested for bipolar disorder, and my heart dropped. We told my dad, and I explained to him what's been happening to my mood, he just said blankly, "" That sounds like my mother. She was like that too."". I could see tears building up in his eyes. I have nothing against people with bipolar disorder, I'm just scared, and afraid that my dad is going to think I'm just like his mother now, that I'll be violent towards him, or want to kill myself. I don't wanna trigger his childhood trauma. I'm just so nervous now.",4.655884444444447,5.964626304000003,5.4026666666666685,81.0657777777778,69.96000000000001,8.755555555555556,30.68888888888889,9.150863307647796,2.597422222222223,1016,42,197,20,18,330,128,250,0.271,0.6759999999999999,0.052000000000000005,-0.9966,2,0,1,0,1,2,44.0,1,0,0,0,9,18,4,5,8,0,21,8,2,1,1,31,45,16,2,9,10,10,1,3,0,4,6,2,1,0,7,9,1,1,3,0,0,3,3,13,0,0,9,8,36,4,27,29,0,28,0,2,5,0,31,8,0,4,19,123,43,2,0.0,0.1228684508100039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082458177523864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279662369540157,0.11474292550887315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786346361479936,0.0,0.0,0.2166904584350308,0.3565501872345776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664940436426675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849337812668763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956899811542423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216717481235884,0.0,0.1178710705652872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170224517645276,0.110391394051602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12288590738452312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11472953338219935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169789812922176,0.10980413832033367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15198886888230995,0.0,0.0,0.0917719149171061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446761218971942,0.10450598176627668,0.0,0.0,0.12145308417802987,0.413864811553201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028694143691532,0.0,0.0,0.09950368210561146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899411543518832,0.07189305421953643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864317600332866,0.0,0.3114676734826663,0.0,0.3305443382824215,0.0,0.0,0.11715234868781235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343180703456635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797007055024371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040458242907505,0.0,0.06644726380205662,0.0,0.0,0.060468750778499065,0.0,0.0,0.09909052621392246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06116539876755569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733209814150414,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway22456778,2020/02/05,"Abandonment issues Hey, a little off topic I guess but I didn’t know anywhere else to go. 

I guess I’m looking for someone else who maybe suffers from this. 

I’m past my bad days of mental health and is living a civil life with my old demonus thoughts. 

There’s 2 instances of this topic that happened over the last 5 years. I was just going to see if maybe someone who deals with this or knows about it would want to hear me out.

I think these instances impact my life today and how I can be.",2.228338833883388,4.092431811881191,3.0401320132013225,93.25434543454348,77.4158415841584,4.884928492849285,22.113311331133108,5.033348758259628,-0.016961276127612557,387,11,81,1,9,122,75,101,0.11599999999999999,0.8690000000000001,0.015,-0.8922,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,6,3,0,1,0,19,21,6,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,8,5,0,1,4,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,3,3,10,0,13,16,0,12,0,2,2,0,5,4,0,4,6,48,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009494892713026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820858942256563,0.1729807978539645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28032864168862875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190714182114988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696720989086858,0.0,0.14837329128395768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17834949609318876,0.18910789014787766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512580105282288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18442244741630004,0.13676861608176544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370255228944659,0.0,0.16816642802996531,0.1481587965966117,0.0,0.14089863308278924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33712873575238783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690896056436504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760639959162224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017146250454645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133704336496535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843303804661745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751099068680284,0.0,0.1332039576329572,0.0,0.0,0.15904224420297247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896498728439332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11919091114379428,0.0,0.0,0.10804918219533274
mentalhealth,maltipoo9455,2020/02/05,"Family doctors & ADHD Hi guys,

We are located in Canada.

My bf has been having a bit of a crisis lately with an intense school program and he’s on the brink of a breakdown. He’s been panicking a lot, can’t sleep, and can’t focus. This intense program has finally been a push for wanting to go on medication for ADHD which he’s believed he’s had for a very long time. He also suffers from depression and anxiety. He’s never gotten proper medical attention because he grew up on a reserve.

We went to a walk in clinic and they referred us to a psychiatrist 3 months ago. Still waiting. We went to the AAC (a facility at the hospital) yesterday and they said they can’t treat ADHD. They gave us a form to have a doctor fill out to refer him to an ADHD clinic. When the doctor was filling out the referral he did not seem very hopeful that that process would be quick either. He prescribed him a low dose of antidepressants in the meantime. All doctors have said it sounds like he’s suffering from ADHD and anxiety.

By some act of God, a family doctor is available and he has an apt tomorrow. I need to know, do family doctors have the ability to prescribe/ treat medication for ADHD?????? At this point, it seems like only god can.",3.8693666739462738,5.5323791950207495,5.710369076217518,76.71405328674385,72.40248962655602,8.725136492683992,29.696658659095874,9.276330184999452,2.8442232365145226,970,41,175,22,19,334,136,241,0.107,0.813,0.08,-0.8683,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,5,0,4,0,5,9,0,0,24,0,22,13,1,0,2,30,36,9,0,4,2,0,0,2,1,1,12,3,0,1,7,13,0,1,6,0,0,9,5,4,0,0,12,3,13,5,32,22,6,35,0,4,0,0,28,14,0,5,14,116,20,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.590981612435202,0.0,0.07265033974455491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554134798028627,0.0,0.08880086937179525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539445907776878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04996050449695817,0.0,0.0,0.0923379873554975,0.0,0.0,0.08947631519454069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058983678898108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.503321574515777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23178658656727305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978038703686919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04657831097465782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115076680692572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140224642674225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045041674463856346,0.0,0.09245158022230124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800805463747844,0.0,0.0,0.07252976953969673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967729829407324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24769054377889274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541765948690798,0.0,0.0,0.0607704151703436,0.06321064261061746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06233233845856375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747628694338503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559206175145763,0.0,0.0,0.08294532100655172,0.0,0.1492219797338552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201664472897165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06545133025782361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04779005169805379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19716945690793264,0.0,0.0,0.1352469690150513,0.0483406310135471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195076568098598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05822022529253903,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Relevant-Blueberry,2020/02/05,"Death hitting hard My mental health has been in shambles for a few months now, but I have no idea what to do now. A close friend of mine died in a car accident a couple of days ago. He was also my best friends brother. I’m struggling to find value in life and questioning a lot around me. I how can I cope without doing something drastic? At the point I’m at i feel like I have nearly nothing left.",1.4058132530120488,3.379140831325305,2.8152861445783164,93.3573870481928,80.44578313253012,5.113855421686747,23.62801204819277,5.985473137389443,0.4052421686746985,311,11,67,2,8,101,64,83,0.207,0.588,0.205,0.4215,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,6,0,8,2,0,1,0,11,12,4,2,0,2,1,2,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,2,9,4,13,9,3,16,0,0,0,0,5,10,0,2,6,47,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18399844815130267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16599380485376247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18478147531556302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178321069034281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296724656701723,0.0,0.1338655998125999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21542508469071514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495372415728033,0.14828818423121634,0.0,0.0,0.1897153919560985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32073642566967603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859421180717246,0.0,0.0,0.2206374040932728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23432147743222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22552561728784826,0.0,0.14661296280859742,0.10140830938903568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17646875159239395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209181929108882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16568054422874956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19916919418870424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19622092086880186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325261159340609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15979767216868473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169974294750302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20009025467913608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,binewt,2020/02/05,"My friend is actively suicidal but I'm also severely depressed and I don't know what to do I love my friend dearly and they're like a sibling to me, but I just don't know what to do. They've struggled with mental health problems since they were young and, as far as I know, they have attempted multiple times in the past 5 years. I've only known them for two years, but they're very dear to me. The only problem is I just... don't know how to handle it. 

I have my own set of mental health problems from depression to a personality disorder, and while I truly want to help them and I don't know how I would live with myself if they killed themselves, its beginning to be too much. I've been on the verge of a breakdown for the past three weeks (to the point where I gave myself an intestinal problems), but I have no reason to be like this. My home life is normal, I have a therapist I routinely see, and I'm on medication. On the other hand, my friend has basically had their dreams crushed and burned right in front of them, on top of already existing trauma. They already had a severely rough childhood and I'm one of the few people who knows the details about it, so there's already some pressure on me. They snap at me sometimes but apologize immediately after, and routinely deny anything positive I say about them or a future that involves them.

I want to be their friend. I want to support them. I love them very much! I'm just too mentally unstable myself to be able to balance their issues on top of mine. How do I put some distance between us/express to them that I can't hand it without making it seem like I don't care about them?",4.924597402597404,5.408147563636367,5.7355411255411255,81.93045454545457,68.81818181818181,8.952380952380953,29.95670995670996,8.976282227363876,2.283580086580086,1296,47,263,22,21,425,160,330,0.16899999999999998,0.617,0.214,0.9392,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,17,3,15,23,1,2,15,0,26,9,3,5,0,46,48,24,2,10,11,0,3,3,4,1,4,1,1,1,12,11,0,0,9,1,0,2,8,10,0,3,5,5,50,13,43,38,6,31,0,2,1,2,30,16,0,5,15,185,62,0,0.09134884703640814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30241717271296753,0.07305163997158617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517231768476659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313623763513093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573572561953631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469369279668343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28230357047886545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19419910547007144,0.0,0.0,0.061229206617450335,0.0,0.09163034170724316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534446313046446,0.0,0.0,0.10106396478810742,0.0,0.3012176241148449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452239216817042,0.13388529736049018,0.0,0.08066270552160837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16489180189492916,0.0,0.06097606473222466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202435300305646,0.2761744570037345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430382660962484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950247489899535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061900342878613235,0.13894982901577374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17440562166748913,0.06332978864254701,0.07976228974290693,0.0,0.0,0.08635418700612975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3496340387303029,0.0,0.09183082199244104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392182888241726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801141624747214,0.0,0.07264426963760114,0.0,0.0,0.07279320411292192,0.08316055951918877,0.0,0.20639639147118055,0.0,0.07556471024145547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903463455029782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549764888355268,0.0,0.09992081214000184,0.10366158908410264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606305212104007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05326624731489795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923455004795308,0.0,0.10988141549792213,0.0,0.0,0.15074473126044854,0.16163975024726876,0.0,0.07327453501509443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805702875188913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489160000820324,0.0,0.0,0.11765132500370287
mentalhealth,SpiralAsh,2020/02/05,"Go ahead and downvote this, but for real... Assuming those on this sub also on ones for anxiety, depression, PTSD, therapy, etc. at least with some overlap. Right? So a message to everyone who posts: 

When you reach out in any way, I find that brave. When you’re asking for support, I applaud the vulnerability. When you’re asking for advice to sort through the confusion, I’m impressed by your willpower and intention to make sense of your world.

But for real, when people pour out responses to you in support, give tidbits (even if they don’t work for you), make you feel less alone just because they respond..... Please respond to them in some way. 

While you’re putting yourself out there in your post, they are putting themselves out there in their response. We all need to see the give and take more often. Some level of acknowledgement is just sort of, well, I don’t know...kind?",4.3583610867659965,6.58419674233129,4.225560911481157,85.5046165644172,72.37423312883436,7.111130587204207,28.82077125328659,7.957251820313856,1.898863628396144,691,28,129,10,14,211,104,163,0.08,0.773,0.147,0.9218,1,1,0,0,0,0,38.0,1,7,5,2,13,7,0,1,4,0,4,0,0,3,1,32,18,13,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,0,4,0,0,3,2,2,1,1,0,2,16,5,31,18,8,29,0,1,1,0,21,16,0,9,6,89,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048666843936058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14889842737046866,0.0,0.11496977957915122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977659471269446,0.0,0.10998075081515134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26880398320666005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876385421826563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382561888410472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16033731780386629,0.09495622034882016,0.0,0.0,0.13737476671461696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269251128380322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13139970383340807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758272816280496,0.08170564553442344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497103757586726,0.07901014465773626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19193011203019286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066008169250564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741969898822413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09966938242399287,0.0,0.0,0.15781211731526135,0.0,0.0,0.27537656120995163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805499637630358,0.2890494824524055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272748239830384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277555074900184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456304930290373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262883640246647,0.0,0.0,0.10809429177354613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16440918102263866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282298383287926,0.0,0.0,0.12926308097859188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466350710387873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KhajitCaravan,2020/02/05,Balance...or lack there of It would seem in struggle to find it. Especially when it comes to work. I can't find something that allows me to work enough to not be taken by severe depressive episodes and to have enough down time so as to not be perpetually on the edge of a panic attack.,6.662105263157892,5.8519088947368445,7.139298245614036,77.7184210526316,65.31578947368422,9.705263157894738,31.280701754385966,8.841846274778883,2.2740807017543867,225,7,46,3,3,74,44,57,0.256,0.7440000000000001,0.0,-0.9349,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,3,4,1,2,2,0,5,0,0,1,0,10,8,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,13,4,3,6,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,35,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643402303946799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001554345711596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20012919693052428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4801748755120797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4247411390643068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726214928942591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21152956521059035,0.0,0.2624978667853937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788801757119898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429105367227641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548954215874728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383180930310747,0.0,0.0,0.1650601200246551,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheDerpQuenn,2020/02/05,"Don't mind me; I'm just venting--- ~~just need to get this off my chest~~

I've known that something has been ""off"" (if you will) with me for about two years now. I have very little self-esteem, attach my worth to what other think of me, and have social anxiety so bad it's become a major issue; ex I can't talk to teachers for help/go get materials needed to complete an assignment.

In December of last year I finally, finally came to my mother and told her that I needed to see a therapist and that it wasn't up for debate. Since then, I feel like she's trying to stop me. 

She's ""read"" articles online about how me spending so much time on my computer has made me have social anxiety, but says she can't re-find these articles to let me read them. She constantly makes me want to ""rethink"" why I ""feel like I have issues"". She keeps indirectly claiming that the only reason I feel like I have issues is because my friends also have issues. She has suggested that I was suggested that I might have social anxiety and that's why I think I have it. She's also pulled the ""just get over it"" card.

I'm just really frustrated because I've been told that I should not be afraid to seek help, but when I do I get this. 

Thanks for reading- praying that you're having a better day.",6.003588039867111,5.338224596899226,6.781638981173867,79.26488372093026,66.59689922480621,10.162126245847176,30.05647840531561,9.606745405546679,2.4788152823920258,998,30,204,18,14,332,138,258,0.055999999999999994,0.8220000000000001,0.122,0.9544,0,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,1,1,13,9,1,1,6,0,26,1,1,4,0,35,49,14,0,6,8,2,3,3,1,3,0,1,0,0,18,6,0,2,8,3,2,2,5,3,0,1,8,5,39,6,25,36,2,21,1,0,1,0,23,7,0,3,15,136,57,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537288655126864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22058687221462656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025336965960901,0.1171836087208486,0.1061532642237312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500734670929219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993181677128593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007764558553528,0.10386792890590496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061987273586794414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579836542915806,0.2059972149341731,0.0,0.21058213585444047,0.08784885677329722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425946843352296,0.0,0.20086788443472745,0.0,0.05462529475122326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288498995122304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4012831513615151,0.0,0.08543287533729918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834788040753883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982857643212187,0.0,0.14087318833678694,0.09633411208882826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094787750012262,0.06415859560688172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196455321704656,0.09705039459864233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065678096597383,0.2138077855146152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310102684239868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28842791583912136,0.0,0.061574773160377176,0.09882390187671762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076435800494895,0.0,0.0,0.0765925083246966,0.0,0.10027060535392067,0.0,0.0,0.07950866799658514,0.0,0.0,0.2939363942513097,0.0,0.07399527613606383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803578048996423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772549048243246,0.0,0.08849127746758938,0.0,0.11159881339914013,0.0,0.12317530851946196,0.0,0.0,0.056046378787816584,0.0,0.0,0.1836871142522193,0.0,0.06525688121087947,0.0,0.09389197935010442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930628432057492,0.0566920775425248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734606137293379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237919143630342
mentalhealth,PumpkinWafffle,2020/02/05,"First appointment tomorrow I have my first therapy appointment tomorrow and I’m terrified that I’m not going to have anything to talk about. I’ve spent four years wanting to get counseling but now that it’s finally happening, I’m scared that there’s not actually anything wrong with me and I’ve just been faking it, even to myself. What if they think there’s nothing wrong with me at all and I’m wasting their time? The spiraling is brutal. 

Sorry, just had to rant.",2.390575757575757,5.213015411111115,3.7275757575757598,82.91045454545456,83.77777777777777,8.161616161616159,25.959595959595962,8.841846274778883,2.6567777777777777,377,16,69,11,11,123,58,90,0.235,0.7,0.066,-0.9527,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,2,7,5,1,1,1,0,5,0,0,0,1,14,15,5,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,5,0,3,3,0,7,0,9,12,1,10,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,8,45,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.212979307732908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592002682006137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441512481244136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390808494900009,0.0,0.3712845688085076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11402596960814645,0.0,0.12403580028071748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19299665835646715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20941557214433792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185050833181177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443116193740057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542008677731075,0.0,0.0,0.2495864784894051,0.0,0.0,0.13984499339194512,0.0,0.0,0.12726260750524154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872877372265504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4772415172383922,0.0,0.14054504635837362
mentalhealth,NinjaMagik,2020/02/05,Mental Health Masters Program Recommendations What are accredited online mental health programs? My sister-in-law is looking for something that is accredited.,9.844202898550725,14.596508782608694,8.947826086956521,44.56637681159421,69.86956521739131,8.284057971014493,42.44927536231884,8.841846274778883,5.878171014492754,134,8,11,3,3,42,19,23,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.676351830400569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671637724636165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6412357017203871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24492548874294726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigAl-98,2020/02/05,"What’s wrong with me? Am I crazy? 
I’d like to start off by saying this is going to be a long post. There are several things I am concerned/confused about. First, ever since I was a child I’ve gotten this feeling like someone or something is watching/following me and intends to kill or harm me and I’ll get the chills and very strong anxiety. It has never been a huge issue, more like an annoyance especially recently since I got a new job in a wastewater plant working nights. It’s not always a person that I’m afraid is following me but sometimes a “creature”.  I don’t always believe they are following me or mean me harm but sometimes I just think people are watching me and judging me, either negatively or that they want to have sex with me or even be me. Now the second thing. Ive always had trouble processing my emotions. I can feel very “excited” about something good but it just won’t come out physically. And I’ve always felt all of my emotions are extreme, if something happens that would be a minor aggravation for most it usually makes me extremely angry. Same for the good emotions too. If I am happy it’s like my happiness is so extreme it’s going to make me explode, or if I love something or someone it’s the same way, EXTREMELY strong like the feeling is so intense that it’s trying to get out but can’t. I tend to over exaggerate my place in people’s lives because of this as well. Any advice or opinions would be great!!",2.722764827764826,4.945954164335667,4.178174048174046,83.97372830872833,77.2867132867133,6.7545195545195575,27.72545972545973,7.793537801064563,1.8663961667961682,1145,49,216,18,27,379,152,286,0.092,0.7090000000000001,0.19899999999999998,0.9883,1,0,4,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,4,12,22,2,1,14,0,28,2,0,3,3,48,51,23,1,6,19,0,4,5,0,3,0,1,0,2,18,10,0,0,6,0,0,5,6,7,1,2,6,6,29,15,23,38,6,25,0,0,1,2,6,8,0,13,15,152,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971685766861834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3309578281038834,0.0,0.0,0.06762049407415717,0.0,0.07606894759696603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06061580434172275,0.0,0.0,0.11203132216549347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08565607477233532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355593474572305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06567712709891105,0.08994635859464613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083483583868312,0.07103773307371608,0.09547500682828708,0.0,0.0,0.08458096663323614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390334035911096,0.0,0.11302455061396255,0.16680588878812805,0.07952876353425155,0.10962952070826744,0.0,0.0,0.08793171218054878,0.21170483384080854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378627716826712,0.09867576855722386,0.0,0.11001218441882488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428992050574534,0.0,0.0878045943890059,0.08799851730152518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897456742234988,0.0,0.13274979054146652,0.0,0.0,0.10831592259209576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669185856666108,0.09603676662608474,0.0,0.09331478389766894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787403654618788,0.08682445565303003,0.10389038450867152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523305236986387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09818193132228896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907620490743936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112335380516258,0.0,0.1645104435803075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16850510602672591,0.30620549951897136,0.1966912508108942,0.0,0.07038194153948056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321229006905449,0.06371514311983012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751112014057574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951568443882403,0.16409169391246894,0.05865045320851375,0.07892837375276952,0.0,0.0,0.08940570472836112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239123917767261,0.0,0.0,0.14127422533447115,0.10871862780366244,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AChangeOfSeasoning,2020/02/05,"I'm such a cold person that it's starting to scare me. I seem to be detached from normal emotion to some degree. My attachments to people are almost entirely pragmatic. I'm absolutely certain that I could cut out anyone from my life, and wouldn't really miss them. My relationships are usually fairly surface-level, and I move on almost immediately after a breakup, even if I thought I was in love. I've lost four grandparents and lost a close friend to suicide, and felt very little in response to any of those (aside from feeling guilty and paranoid that I'd played a part in her suicide by having drifted apart from her a year before she died). I have never killed an animal, but I'm not really sad if an animal dies. I don't understand the point of pets in general, they just seem like a financial burden that constantly demands attention.

I'd never intentionally hurt anybody, but I seem to have an issue with emotional attachment to people. I experience empathy, but only seemingly from a logical perspective. The end result is good enough, I guess, since I come across as a relatively successful person who tries to be kind to others. But sometimes I don't feel like a normal human being. 

One thing that might play a part is my self-esteem. It seems to oscillate from very high to very low, and I tend to hold myself to impossible standards. I'm constantly focused on either self-improvement or beating myself up for not meeting my standards. It could get in the way of emotional attachment to others, but that seems like a pretty dubious link to me. Does anyone have any insight on what might be happening, and how I could possibly fix the issue? Thanks. 

This isn't an alt account, so I'll be deleting this in a few hours, just fyi.",7.161639922978175,7.40295993292683,7.83531450577664,69.63484595635433,64.0,11.295507060333762,34.33632862644416,10.992663274268294,3.986796341463414,1390,56,237,36,19,464,188,328,0.08900000000000001,0.7070000000000001,0.204,0.9907,1,0,0,0,0,2,39.0,0,0,2,4,6,22,2,1,20,0,23,2,0,3,3,62,49,18,5,8,13,0,3,3,1,3,1,0,1,3,17,11,0,1,15,2,1,3,8,10,0,2,5,4,28,12,42,33,6,32,0,6,0,1,13,18,0,16,13,163,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16513208341005967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214346323411582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530788659231568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016251140133221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102705328857646,0.0,0.1782075486230218,0.0,0.19749907759078275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17114903046646235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215628802098631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782498698040077,0.07303001019893025,0.08519730314568813,0.0,0.05446026821441029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065609857021558,0.0,0.0,0.08338271357373292,0.058905347530074995,0.07916903051819665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370396507845674,0.0,0.04307895331511969,0.0,0.0,0.06915873032527307,0.0,0.0,0.09083267525581268,0.0,0.07291403935335067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711746414701932,0.0,0.0,0.08120084758364539,0.0,0.0882690022443173,0.0,0.0,0.17212167283281402,0.0,0.0,0.09122343401652397,0.0858634346264685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05823988992399001,0.12084897535095095,0.08264084084933321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18001715354081002,0.0,0.07441819862086918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494190234324095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763584085555165,0.0,0.0,0.12718763356112855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615753573567474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055873147823029615,0.06271018847025928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785798803188284,0.0,0.11432681881472392,0.14399177769493476,0.0,0.0,0.07794593747554251,0.09295480133791824,0.0,0.08388563624250348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564463446527456,0.0,0.0,0.08852502918287823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255110932821252,0.0,0.0,0.4503796281878283,0.1720355740919446,0.0,0.0,0.06820702485937227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154938216509436,0.0,0.058361557257497775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18038317875697585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591281446607445,0.0,0.0,0.054778953699028896,0.0,0.0,0.06545948077867851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05598103742835596,0.0,0.0,0.08583780380215628,0.0,0.0,0.09081173022749296,0.2041002261435278,0.0,0.0654483622255505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05309784702160651
mentalhealth,Lilshauno,2020/02/05,How do you deal with feeling like you don't exist? Just feel like i am not even real that all this isn't real everything's a lie,-0.03045977011494116,1.8192981379310358,2.421379310344829,94.91988505747128,84.86206896551724,5.2459770114942526,16.563218390804597,6.42735559955562,-0.4032160919540231,102,2,24,1,3,35,24,29,0.0,0.764,0.23600000000000002,0.6705,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,1,9,6,1,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,1,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039086171758931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19470157587948905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649322037933698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29810256662706114,0.4211864674144173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880324404771077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.671055816471024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stonednforgot,2020/02/05,"Maybe someone can point me in the right direction I am going to see a doctor in the morning.  I am personally trying to get myself on medication to help me focus and to help take all the extra anxiety off from everyday encounters.  I suffer from PTSD (personal situations from growing up) axniety, panic attacks, depression, now pain for the rest of my life on my leg. (Bad injury last summer)

Currently im a medical marijuana patient.  However, smoking doesnt take the pain away as much as u may think it does.  The pain patches only do so much.

Can anyone help assist me further on what I should do?",5.306128318584069,6.664606902654867,7.148838495575223,68.9671515486726,68.46902654867257,10.251769911504423,33.59402654867257,10.411451182825502,3.9807707964601766,472,22,78,13,8,165,81,113,0.21600000000000005,0.708,0.076,-0.9584,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,2,8,1,1,8,0,9,8,1,0,1,5,15,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,8,0,0,0,1,10,0,19,13,5,18,0,2,1,0,5,11,0,1,5,56,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145021411960026,0.0,0.0,0.10465731489059148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027866895355978,0.1406260336523203,0.0,0.12497365648231305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289161820778997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320027805603234,0.1309829462653916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819981296158851,0.0,0.0850646253290012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009750833090531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16167634468676792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220063547948076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572096461222637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15037019940722585,0.0,0.0,0.3015667287084414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22005895353779392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383575114484215,0.4777991653530648,0.175613166671058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613835577987101,0.0,0.0,0.14149270728831215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749638621408855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12782294486157028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927282137919852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824269889735607,0.0,0.0,0.1268204441630076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250762568431453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590668129765582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162054366248144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway351251,2020/02/05,"I'm in pain Hi friend,  


I'm a neurotypical..recently my life has turned out for the worse.... a year ago my brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia. It has been a tough year. My girlfriend helped me a lot in hard times but she has BPD and can have uncontrollable anger in which she can say horrible things (not against me, but they're scary).  I don't know what to do anymore, I've been crying all day and dreading a future where my kids might get that disease or that she might lash out at them or even worse, act on the things she says in her episodes. I don't want to lose my future with her she is lovely and kind..what do I do? I feel like i want to die, i'm not suicidal i just dread my current existence",1.9103767660910518,3.6620743129251694,2.7873469387755097,95.21891679748822,77.9795918367347,6.427838827838827,22.192046049188903,7.321109707123232,0.4791835688121404,552,16,129,7,13,174,91,147,0.228,0.645,0.127,-0.9435,1,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,1,1,3,10,1,3,7,0,17,4,0,0,1,22,27,7,2,2,7,1,2,1,2,2,3,2,0,1,7,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,3,4,22,3,15,22,2,18,0,1,0,1,17,9,0,5,9,82,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14946199772572022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672151486653304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21235754866505674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18520943170290172,0.10873906913764003,0.0,0.0,0.17113492073493972,0.17498986454293525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136487226176882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525394338327327,0.12045453903009087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130267150091878,0.0,0.08809141582302353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15104084141785162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301527975593413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558067087527188,0.0926632782441198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909375613777183,0.0823740018438078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18863071165545292,0.0,0.14334562282544086,0.15217650325804175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3577357080024587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17941221494432005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681698133720119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844312406005284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22403309353190115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831745623380812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18339853363432707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19890030268298012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3436546239028785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21715776087094246
mentalhealth,nerowhite84,2020/02/06,"Getting rid of Phone addiction   

​

Now these days it’s easy to get into phone addiction. It is seen as a serious addiction like drug addiction or sometimes even worse. Like other addiction this addiction can destroy your life. Keep you up at night and ruin your day. Also, it can ruin your focus as well. So, if you ever feel like you can’t focus like before or you can’t think clearly like before maybe this is because you have phone addiction. Mostly nowadays it’s called smartphone addiction. 

We as humans don’t like to get bored. We always want to get into something. So, it seems like humans got no chill right? Kind of yes. It is. We got no chill. We are always on hook of dopamine. Smartphones help us with that. That’s why it gets easy to get addictive to smartphone. There are ways you can improve your addiction. But first you have to tell yourself and realize that you are really addicted. Until you have that realization you won’t be able to fix anything at all. 

Well then how to fix this addiction then? 

To say I have always been a smartphone addict. I tried a lot of stuff but after a while I became addicted again. Then I thought why can’t use it as I want? But that question never really got answered. It affected my mental health. It affected my sleep and then it took over my life and made it really bad. I always felt tired and exhausted. I got into the run which I never wanted. 

Now I feel messed up even after knowing everything. I lost my focus. I wonder how to have those back again.",2.2858862598588634,4.938653383561646,3.4999501867995058,85.72981527604819,81.94520547945207,6.6900788709007895,22.547114985471147,7.898369717300924,1.4304255707762557,1196,40,221,23,33,387,144,292,0.124,0.78,0.09699999999999999,-0.9363,0,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,5,14,0,2,16,19,1,0,5,1,21,21,1,6,5,47,48,26,0,4,6,0,3,7,0,1,20,1,0,2,25,13,0,1,11,0,0,2,9,9,2,1,11,5,34,10,31,35,3,33,0,3,1,0,29,10,0,8,27,156,59,0,0.05409646718793156,0.0,0.0,0.8256238784262585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043260925265673586,0.18005037711196728,0.058613499596858576,0.06573312878673596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044516783177941714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041596844091879685,0.04516829049097886,0.03297670429250785,0.0,0.09206421836770702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05523854134650138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977549209429053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273472744634473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714604127633915,0.04893335165267918,0.0,0.0,0.048618416548172325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05470559845437885,0.03864652696804355,0.05194109195932035,0.0,0.0,0.04601442735486152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957902813810047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306354646605734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057502014955921124,0.0,0.0,0.0362597216514822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04808342561915941,0.0,0.056333145987576765,0.029730003621649306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641986919487076,0.18500160944943594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05905268427007693,0.04599088189520606,0.0,0.05118738525107699,0.0,0.0,0.0543471723496642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054516515300562784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344506087350023,0.0,0.0,0.05076586986068598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060600423808604316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396674629939504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046198087400418544,0.0,0.043019681981048725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04924739200667545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05413553500957224,0.0,0.0,0.04164610335553368,0.053502789291948606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06192751246380099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047282696720561374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034662831854418284,0.0,0.042946552313195496,0.0,0.06217593112072601,0.0,0.0,0.06010316551295695,0.03672795023523833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507138930475707,0.046721978736454284,0.0,0.0,0.09572249381573203,0.042939257670496236,0.0,0.0,0.09727844145296848,0.0,0.09762729493978464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05866531106451835,0.0,0.0,0.05512892165498928,0.0,0.0,0.06573312878673596,0.0
mentalhealth,c7j7,2020/02/06,"I have a protection plan but I'm having trouble finding a time delay safe. Hello friends,

For some background, I struggle with depression, anxiety, and ADHD. I have previously tried to kill myself with medication, and I have hurt myself in the past. 

I used to have a protection plan set up with my room mates. They would have my meds and I would only be allowed one pill box (one week) worth of meds. Partly because it's the only option I have. I'm not really a fan of my roommates, I've been ""friends"" with them for 8 years, but I didn't realise how much they were degrading me. 

Anyways, here is the question: does anyone know of a good safe I can use to store my meds? In the event I have thoughts again, I would have to wait for an extended amount of time to access them. That way I will be safer and have a chance to get help.",3.7196506986027913,4.7827680658682645,4.6051646706586835,86.83293662674654,71.93413173652695,7.7223552894211585,26.491516966067863,8.07648339933343,1.4626451097804392,645,21,136,9,12,209,100,167,0.188,0.665,0.147,-0.8711,1,0,0,0,0,3,24.0,0,0,4,2,4,11,1,1,11,0,21,2,0,4,0,28,29,7,1,3,3,0,0,0,3,4,2,0,1,0,2,8,0,6,4,0,2,0,2,6,0,2,4,0,23,5,20,19,4,14,0,2,0,0,10,4,0,3,8,93,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17908383158941416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11399400447940852,0.0,0.0,0.1041928674680317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09083651726409436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12834407884216392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040167115952978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619454601245495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302530724225449,0.0,0.07785277843645633,0.0,0.0,0.12498445051751965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998798061374021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952075307553942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648600360540445,0.0,0.08189326511482507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4965572310333176,0.15011421910610864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095411888079041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019491869356533,0.22666114345772595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16136580378324825,0.14224910499213722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16692788323156876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546109743964867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15578001388553878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829912431598663,0.17378054524595649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116957279979018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573975731753649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182790307392723,0.11952868175871642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31756219556753124,0.0,0.0,0.09595903803389558
mentalhealth,justnewaccounttoask,2020/02/06,"Something about me  Hi, I am not sure if it's the right place to ask, but I have a problem and at this point I have no idea what to do anymore. I made this account only to ask this, so none of my friends will recognize me.  
So, I am 19 years old (m).  
Lately (for almost a year) I feel very bad. Everything annoys me, I am almost always sad, but I can't cry.  
I have big problems with concentration and I can't stand going to school anymore (my grades got worse, I feel like I don't know anything at this point). I feel empty almost always and I don't see any future ahead of me.  
I had cut myself like 3 times (it wasn't deep tho cause I did it with disposable razor).  
It seems like I have problems with decision-making and everything is way too much for me. My mom is always yelling at me for doing nothing (for example not vacuuming), but for me guessing what she wants me to do is just too much and I feel that I have no power to do anything.  
Also nothing brings me happiness anymore. Things that I used to enjoy are now neutral for me (for example games, currently I play only out of boredom or cause of friends).  
Sorry for this post being so chaotic, english is not my first language and It's hard for me to talk about it anyway.",2.005770750988141,3.704880940711465,3.726620553359684,88.82732213438737,77.53754940711462,6.339130434782609,24.14822134387352,7.1686216300943375,0.9316735177865612,950,32,201,11,22,318,131,253,0.212,0.713,0.07400000000000001,-0.9892,2,0,1,0,1,1,36.0,0,0,0,3,12,16,2,0,3,0,26,0,0,4,1,39,42,16,0,5,9,1,5,3,2,1,0,1,1,0,16,10,0,0,7,2,1,2,11,7,0,1,5,7,38,9,31,35,3,25,0,1,1,0,9,10,0,7,13,144,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075293180938697,0.0,0.0,0.08186605463593256,0.2555426274290368,0.0,0.0,0.06961579293555106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.304573583144483,0.0,0.0,0.16848522686374834,0.0,0.1914061386923222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547551201084032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103264402854724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244974054116497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18400891432636027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070474214064563,0.07313386546462326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707672341125985,0.0,0.0,0.15818316696059675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817980051688493,0.0,0.08187544339071537,0.0,0.1127732019331312,0.0,0.0,0.10897583697003377,0.09170431155904547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155644024832036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056260426374829135,0.0,0.11547895108800227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003990427764766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968659188840849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989568221872365,0.0,0.0,0.15050893328767015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196455477933188,0.0,0.10742114767778928,0.0,0.0,0.15571552258489058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069559102602668,0.0,0.1935473753699456,0.0,0.09804312354077646,0.0,0.0,0.29386567497057425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742427777427159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360492102420243,0.08157643589317032,0.0931947169399708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881020000705083,0.0,0.11459595735237475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648345943218696,0.0,0.0,0.08228193499183789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680107460205066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05969335547605295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08841567859327405,0.0,0.08446679917279683,0.06038107029597314,0.08125733772200439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432479852224737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184713997508174
mentalhealth,whydoesitmatter879,2020/02/06,Is being extremely manipulative a symptom of any sort of mental disorder? I am really aware of how manipulative I am and it makes me worry there’s something wrong with me. I try not to be but it always seems like I end up realizing I’ve been trying to get my way. Out of curiosity is being manipulative a symptom for any disorder?,4.199846153846156,5.804492369230772,7.633846153846152,63.48615384615386,71.46153846153847,10.73846153846154,29.92307692307693,10.793553405168565,3.8082923076923065,264,11,47,9,5,100,46,65,0.158,0.7929999999999999,0.05,-0.7266,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,8,2,0,5,0,13,11,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,7,1,10,7,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,2,34,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983972740193455,0.0,0.0,0.2939553064087289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4954136173250045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914294280375708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129204195796672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559152402938184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442702611412328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178109350908981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384601473821373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967591003317717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16638951819921874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4492892794843864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934798433320498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715560837620752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194932566906056,0.0,0.0,0.2363071875318923,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hedgehogfanatic,2020/02/06,"How can I (17 F) treat my family better? I am self diagnosed bipolar 2 (bipolar is common and genetic in my family and doctors couldn’t diagnose me since I was younger) My mother is very controlling and can be very cruel sometimes. The other day my friend called my bf who is a few years older a pedo and I was very upset and I told my mom and she said “well I see where shes coming from!” I was like wtf that’s so rude and she’s like no it wasn’t. I told her “when dad divorced you I see where he was coming from. How is that?” I cuss her out sometimes, tell her to shut up. I definitely say shut up when it’s not warranted. In my defense she has done some pretty cruel things and is quite controlling which obviously doesn’t excuse how I react though. I can get pretty annoyed at my younger brother because he doesn’t listen and is pretty rude as well. How can I work on my anger and treat my family better? I don’t have this problem with my bf or my friends. 

(Please don’t insult me or be cruel thanks)",0.5065714285714265,2.741237014285719,2.7129761904761907,91.19660714285715,86.0,5.595238095238094,19.22619047619048,6.996647511020387,0.3443333333333332,783,22,168,11,24,265,113,210,0.171,0.649,0.18,-0.6721,0,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,0,1,0,6,12,22,9,1,3,0,27,5,0,7,1,29,37,21,0,2,3,4,0,2,4,0,5,3,0,1,9,14,0,3,0,0,0,2,8,11,2,0,9,5,37,11,12,25,2,19,0,0,2,0,30,11,0,3,8,115,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210915316234677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092377202134922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207884330431546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037946071035576,0.0,0.0,0.2653470415630521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628796986162797,0.0,0.0,0.24012594146403254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107594746459995,0.0,0.12105285928532546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33454294827576586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827828120836723,0.0,0.06180221450000181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11558210714656265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13854110000267994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984809942003422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3610337080340866,0.0,0.11318860170789223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581713955336793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252191909121756,0.0940698260642037,0.0,0.0,0.18852537395500932,0.0,0.12340340971016195,0.0,0.0,0.09785161561217397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339858339659745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339163033118436,0.10890654674482396,0.0,0.0,0.0785873468612069,0.0,0.1162203995777336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260644197622532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928076237914076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21271579997520212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611732550881654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617558641950233
mentalhealth,ShitPostd,2020/02/06,"I've sunk so far Hi Guys

Never thought I would post something like this
It's so hard to believe how far I've fallen. I'm freaking 14 year old kid and I just don't know where to go

I've been blaming my family for all my problems the whole time searching for answers why they did it

But maybe I was just approaching it from the wrong side

Maybe it was my fault all the time maybe I should take the responsibility for my actions

So that's the story:

Ever since I was little my parents were always arguing, all the quiet days have been replaced in my head with constant arguments over nothing

I was always the one of my 2 siblings to run and try to make peace, but they have only shifted their frustration to me

When I was 8-10 my parents were loudly arguing over something and I was in the same room as we were celebrating holidays

My father said he's going to kill himself and my mother send me to make him go back

Oh my fucking god I hate that I did what she wanted

When I was, dunno, ten or eleven I was going to school where I experienced so much bullying not only from other students but from some teachers too. I even once ran out of the class to cry in the bathroom

I was talking to my parents about it and for year and a half they didn't want to help me change school

You know fucking why? Coz it would show them that they have power

Like they fucking didn't know that

Or they've kept trying to convince me that others school didn't accept students at the time

Just wanna point out education in my country is free and my aunt was headteacher at the other school

At the same time I was going to choir and at first it was nice, but it was random so sometimes when I was playing with my few friends I had to go

I hated it

I was crying a lot throwing a thantrum that I didn't want to

They didn't care

So I decided to go to music school as a replacement for choir

I was going there for 2 years and I was going to it at 15 and coming back at 20

I didn't want to go there, since the first year of that school, I hated it

I've cried so much and I realised I was helpless pathetic so I learned not to

My only dream was to go to school far away to boarding-school

They never supported me, my father went as far as to destroy that dream only because he didn't want to go with me to leave my papers

When I was once with him to leave some other papers he wanted to go some kind of military shop, so he took taxi and it drove us somewhere, he couldn't find the shop and I wanted to go back to home

I found us a way and we were following that path

He was yelling at me the whole time

When we came back and I've told my mother everything she decided to yell at me coz I once complained about her taking into church, no matter that she made that rule

My father yelled he will crack my head into the wall

The day came and I got into my dream school and I got away

First time I came back, the first weekend, my father decided to yell at me and my sister that we're uselles failing at the same time to point out the things we didn't do or failed at

My mother, the worst fucking person, decided to destroy my life even when I was away from home

She needed some kind of paper that I wasn't staying at home so she didn't have to pay for taking out trash for one more person.

I told her many times, they didn't register it yet and they're dealing with a lot at the moment

Once, on Friday, when I was getting ready to come back home she decided that if I won't bring it back she will destroy my life

If it doesn't sound like a dream I don't know what does

This year I didn't celebrate Christmas with them, this was too fucking painful

2 random things that I didn't know where to include:

When I was going to music school after my regular school my father stormed into one of my classes saying that he's signing me out

He didn't, he just made big mess

And I remember it clearly, my instrument teacher called me a monster

I fucking hate it

Sometimes when we didn't do something my father would get angry and go berserk

He would yell

He once threw my sister by the neck into the wall

The only way to stop him was me running away from home with ready to dial police number

I always wrote to my older sister about it and that I don't want to live with them anymore




I'm going to the psychologist and I don't know if it helps any way, she's trying to make me reach out to my parents, like I haven't tried

I find it rather hilarious, but one thing they told me that will probably hunt me forever

Be careful what people think about you

My parents always follow that rule

Even strangers over family







I'm sinking deeper and deeper and I want to kill myself, but I'm unable to even do that right

I don't want to live

I want to die

Please someone come and help me

Please

PLEASE",3.3398429090087163,4.2492494874623885,4.3613033466597,88.80498128187382,72.68104312938817,6.980993685281197,24.67414920818794,7.082358559648815,0.8451917696752229,3757,106,813,34,71,1223,330,997,0.159,0.7559999999999999,0.084,-0.9979,6,0,3,0,1,2,33.0,7,2,13,7,49,44,18,0,35,0,76,12,3,8,7,147,163,62,3,24,19,18,1,4,1,9,3,12,6,4,53,56,0,2,20,12,4,38,29,29,0,11,70,14,144,16,123,82,19,141,1,3,0,6,88,52,6,15,50,549,197,21,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12183456617998095,0.0,0.0,0.02489294061301052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036302740119742924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375679869388216,0.1970311573336623,0.0,0.02231432405734277,0.0,0.0,0.04124177274428525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03737822619044445,0.12560054484192396,0.07464332990607173,0.0,0.03872368028066479,0.0945969832805266,0.0,0.03955745432439553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062800387109472,0.04721493476248621,0.03773858031705642,0.0,0.0,0.03799064634272765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03203364941230506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671013777056398,0.03311169777017015,0.0,0.0,0.03289859084727502,0.0,0.06901666368777852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691338078779213,0.12454620500602508,0.0,0.0401359532430219,0.028281256415289675,0.2030467236684185,0.03824964186473235,0.0,0.3536629604755728,0.0,0.05855339612021181,0.0,0.0,0.03624512054600743,0.0,0.0,0.03279126596618235,0.1445610938303013,0.07513544244246004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360752353994769,0.0,0.18359110264509826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099694658965716,0.07623782313637564,0.1207042879400497,0.0,0.0,0.07751970800079358,0.0,0.0,0.05171098089451949,0.07153423611263983,0.0366882470746789,0.06464651238064006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06224123752268155,0.0,0.06927386630325487,0.07330320557953196,0.03711215007384743,0.11032519241343863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053818390627627735,0.027142454842361902,0.056464712567987574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03512388740453507,0.0,0.03841123022473082,0.1949178862598264,0.0992191188329569,0.13920035572309378,0.03895074737795878,0.0,0.2032299327909596,0.0,0.0,0.025377588930779148,0.06392488099710117,0.0,0.12054527511224515,0.06920790696657705,0.0,0.035057873348854116,0.0,0.039466833613852025,0.035026442931883804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04146680465949753,0.031260828369577075,0.03482013664066468,0.029110098936934944,0.0,0.40751302847682935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06056076280326489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031015653277483176,0.08454192126883664,0.07240739205727806,0.0,0.0,0.03901650683720763,0.0,0.030603769906743305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041539396421107315,0.0,0.0,0.08256815992066609,0.029422049723280923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295704280646548,0.023455274847474783,0.0,0.029060614334343725,0.17075931655133128,0.0,0.0,0.10493414148935294,0.04066996811542914,0.09941070838874178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806362545681988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374990741340972,0.08716703482029439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033933590746399685,0.06606139524449313,0.08173728756104759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401375942457246,0.040022279968505166,0.0,0.11786345048290495
mentalhealth,Kiiimmi,2020/02/06,"I (21F) feel betrayed by my friend (18F) *TW SELF HARM* Ok so hear me out, I myself have been struggling with my mh for abt 11 years now, including almost 9 years of self harm. No one really knows I'm doing that (like my parents, brothers etc.) just maybe 3 friends including this one. She herself is seeing a therapist as well and we've been discussing our problems with eachother and it's just nice to have someone that doesn't judge you and just lets you vent about everything and kind of understands. But because we share quite a lot with each other she also knows I cut myself. She told me she does as well, but last week we went out of town with some other friends and all shared a hotel room with each other and I couldn't help but notice she had 0 scars on her body or other signs of cutting which she repeatedly said she does. Now am I in kind of a weird situation about it, like I know it's for no one to judge about other people their mental illness and the severity of it and etc but for me it's kind of a big thing she knows, and for her to say she's sailing the same boat yet not showing any signs kind of feels like she lies about it and tbh that would be kind of a deal breaker for our friendship and I don't know what to do. Do I just leave it bc maybe she does have them (although she was just wearing underwear so I could clearly see alsmost her entire body) or do I confront her about it and ask what's up, which I wouldn't feel really ok by bc it feels like I'd invade her privacy. So ye idk my mind is pretty occupied by it and I don't know what to do, any advice???",3.0924196787148617,4.0389561536144605,3.986325301204822,91.12127510040165,73.30722891566266,7.099598393574297,24.074297188755022,7.333567415737692,0.7660357429718876,1241,34,280,13,24,399,165,332,0.107,0.772,0.121,0.8464,1,0,0,0,0,1,29.0,4,3,2,1,19,27,3,1,8,2,24,4,3,0,2,61,43,26,0,5,12,2,4,4,3,2,1,3,1,2,25,24,0,0,11,2,0,1,8,8,2,3,7,9,48,19,39,30,8,17,0,0,2,0,44,8,0,5,12,192,73,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740638177375694,0.0,0.0,0.08956805376834616,0.0,0.0,0.07153057694351651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216537881349099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362068742703974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054525941580137766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198710470091378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141599474211106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221572745816768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348265031867548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995136615912296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038901998544269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809079669679199,0.1278016294802095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073191369566333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081304904598763,0.0,0.059954307348110636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4657254102620922,0.29494574587060185,0.07291108366880385,0.0,0.09471125047074244,0.0,0.09146541742547472,0.0,0.17479676145395442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604447422014693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17972267442484988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014134044639888,0.0,0.09031577374990687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183577934715402,0.0,0.0,0.18183440813228435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932009066659374,0.0,0.0,0.062011151578175674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099955650293412,0.0,0.08558851149405393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513768641300896,0.0,0.0,0.1146038262791826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508439383609925,0.07113168877302567,0.0,0.0,0.14255504434369254,0.0,0.1866250486535907,0.10104942864209374,0.0,0.0,0.10054195551207926,0.0,0.0,0.07578798687031535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350922065605706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038546337023942,0.05942448213536521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547025450120539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311727760639296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717488309220199,0.0,0.16084683807764566,0.0829180835542112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354044329709922,0.0,0.0,0.11520161845726334
mentalhealth,Nick-7293,2020/02/06,"I feel empty I just don’t really care about anything anymore. I don’t really feel any emotions, other that some happiness or anger but otherwise I just feel empty. My grades are slipping and I don’t feel comfortable opening up to anyone I know. I don’t know what to do",1.8227777777777767,4.322238314814818,3.8718518518518543,83.33333333333336,82.51851851851852,7.303703703703704,23.814814814814817,8.344100000000001,1.9207259259259253,215,8,40,5,6,73,33,54,0.115,0.7120000000000001,0.17300000000000001,0.6183,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,13,13,3,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,4,8,3,4,13,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,27,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886769950511855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751580066172359,0.1940010137061872,0.0,0.22831950175874036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828809863454028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31209635582832995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5611526301256434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953530023241858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049609216842053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3554859391594937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flyakite-ta,2020/02/06,"Anxiety maybe? I think I might have anxiety or something.. maybe? I dont know. 

I don't even know if this is the right place to post. 

I used to suffer from panic attacks, and lately I feel I'm constantly in the state of where I'm about to have a panic attack, but it never comes, where my heart races and your mind is all over the place  and it just stops. 

I'm always anxious.I always feel scared something bad is going to happen and I dont know why, I don't like leaving the house on my own with my baby in case something happens and I won't have anyone to make sure she is ok. 

I can't figure my brain out anymore. It feels like everything is going on in there all at once yet I don't know where to begin. 

The way I explained it to my boyfriend is that.. it's like I inherited a house, only the house if FULL of stuff, and it's not my stuff and I don't know what's there. It all needs sorting but I dont know how to sort it or where to put any of it because it's all there, all over the place, unorganised and when I think I'm making progress with it, I find another cupbord filled to the brim. 

It's not a good analogy, but if was what flew out of my mouth when I was rambling, ove not found a better way to describe what's going on in my brain. 

I lost my mum 2 years ago this month, I had a baby 6 months ago. I dont know if that has anything to do with how I'm feeling. My baby seems to be the only thing that makes sense at the minute. 

Everything else just stopped making sence.",2.6510948494230213,3.082009585139321,4.091327047565438,91.87970377146077,73.89164086687308,6.987278356318604,23.35054883197298,6.782984794422108,0.4592427244582047,1148,28,275,9,22,382,143,323,0.142,0.821,0.037000000000000005,-0.9807,0,0,3,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,0,3,16,15,2,3,15,1,26,4,4,7,7,67,62,21,0,5,14,1,4,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,23,14,0,2,18,0,1,7,14,8,0,0,6,4,33,7,35,53,7,47,0,2,0,0,4,22,0,10,17,175,56,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932829308933253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078419884284714,0.0,0.0,0.05344301534436115,0.08240711104509403,0.12024029073776712,0.08878286896367746,0.07793887943667656,0.054951050866104176,0.0,0.06467180926110783,0.0,0.0,0.1788119981648938,0.0,0.0,0.06561828727845552,0.047906946050894544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950532445937901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754619746085702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769721193363994,0.0,0.08492647258145139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3684215148986173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656507800016101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05190709945821125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126092395366413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15894724533956875,0.05614378762929142,0.0,0.0,0.07182865399028028,0.0,0.0,0.08616846030260822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399131895118765,0.06591647839970946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13899146723676428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312799559722126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27204244735203875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3023320847569321,0.0,0.08865148401972997,0.08321409287441697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518341698700822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578885671512748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098342873711619,0.0,0.1579058374469251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337019833053731,0.07935219044722923,0.0,0.12545751150314746,0.0,0.0,0.05827253007890201,0.06061245529603487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369440756894593,0.0,0.11954050527821725,0.0,0.18441382839961373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463254146297532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526625690595297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900335638300245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06711432595309996,0.0,0.0,0.0786810051212965,0.0,0.0,0.07154420681593328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18150427729099808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13140735521351316,0.0,0.0,0.17993053352778174,0.0,0.0,0.07406892582097106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05221084454960265,0.10071293970987416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787540970935929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476011443953085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091408392859973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05060855035668243
mentalhealth,vorttxt,2020/02/06,"I’m scared to tell my family about my depression and anxiety. First off, I’m not sure if I have depression. It’s on and off mostly and oftentimes it happens when something bad happens in my life. I get suicidal tendencies and it’s hard for me to focus and stay on task with things and when i’m alone my pain and ache gets worse. The most recent time I’ve felt really depressed was a month ago and before that probably another two months. I’ve heavily contemplated suicide during those times but I don’t think I’d ever be able to go through with it. As for my anxiety, during one of the times I was extremely depressed I felt dissociative a few times and following that I would hyperventilate and I’d feel more dissociative. This has only happened twice though. I’m not sure if what I’ve described is depression or anxiety. I am a teenager and maybe it’s just hormones etc. Right now I feel fine and content and I haven’t had those thoughts in a while. I’m scared to tell anyone. I’ve told my girlfriend but I never went in detail. The only other person I’ve told was one of my friends. I want help but I don’t want to be looked at different or seen as a problem. What should I do?",1.8371250000000003,4.171103462500003,3.592333333333337,86.40600000000002,81.04166666666666,7.340000000000002,24.18333333333333,8.364918446050245,1.6987033333333332,941,35,192,21,25,314,129,240,0.215,0.733,0.053,-0.9865,1,1,1,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,1,7,14,0,2,8,0,16,2,0,0,4,42,41,26,2,7,10,0,5,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,14,15,0,0,6,0,0,3,6,10,0,5,11,7,21,4,23,26,5,28,0,5,2,0,8,9,0,6,15,122,35,0,0.10077178368307084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932810601354113,0.0,0.0,0.10436917671582953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056680016453804,0.2312704160791436,0.0,0.0,0.07046197421187915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414023013514768,0.0,0.0,0.08574936572171657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4339729481194389,0.0,0.0,0.10528506576797958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238717662462556,0.0,0.09115384763483238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499866919732253,0.0,0.10190648336694803,0.0,0.19351343092344564,0.0,0.0,0.08571642772153049,0.0,0.0,0.07785603009832295,0.0,0.10529819554483093,0.0,0.057270926953755436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673364665210395,0.0,0.09027172458451954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754520242472856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117809099105182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462291827152219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10123880135796967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16087015263386228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07772141195979054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365711372358181,0.15328296488292276,0.10722828277781347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799003456316291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086490267831368,0.0964249874580406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455698503637003,0.0,0.09949997918846504,0.0,0.0,0.08605855265767096,0.0,0.0,0.20178027049310826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757904234313673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740931329369112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22045595085389147,0.0,0.18995242707244206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17615796127032962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694829533285232,0.06457048999782672,0.0990077658223252,0.08000153992689038,0.23504334980326466,0.0,0.0,0.19258351557818187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984393899454964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188756178463227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341645306350536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269505674738233,0.0715853838447323,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pristinegalaxies,2020/02/06,"I have very bad anxiety and it’s getting to the point where I stare at people I’m a girl and my anxiety was amplified this week because of exams and I was shaking during the exam. I stare a lot at people when I’m nervous because I don’t know how to calm myself down. 

I also stare because I want to say something and then I can’t because I’m scared then it becomes a problem because people think I’m creepy. 

It’s getting to the point where a professor started glaring at me and the professor did it to me today because I have a friend who was behind on notes and then I moved my laptop to let her see. The professor literally stopped talking and stared at me. It makes me think that the people I stare at have told her and this is what I deserve. 

I’m trying to focus and my boyfriend says I’m talking to myself without realizing it and yesterday someone I used to talk to just looked at me disgustingly and walked away. 

I’m freaking out and I really need to go to therapy.",2.290348258706466,4.191403134328361,4.263507462686569,84.38441542288558,77.3582089552239,6.854726368159205,28.08208955223881,7.793537801064563,1.8521164179104472,774,34,153,12,18,264,98,201,0.135,0.8290000000000001,0.036000000000000004,-0.9513,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,1,3,11,0,11,0,0,3,0,27,32,18,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,11,13,0,1,4,0,0,4,3,7,0,0,5,9,26,2,25,26,1,27,0,0,7,0,11,14,0,1,9,106,37,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348050176822016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979800834768456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157481768767145,0.0,0.10804293563568196,0.47328334554489293,0.1429112614546634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997350892969556,0.0,0.13521149330742382,0.0,0.0735405532492793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711144219280112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323194596501255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866274667217013,0.0,0.0,0.11001058128211473,0.0,0.0,0.08637497771160682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753088222285134,0.0,0.09594787486491282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3588364783134273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24464815860825906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12381756856223075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289644760793913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20580689155257095,0.1295511834375798,0.0,0.10311441727867443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963953101533537,0.0996178340027624,0.0,0.0,0.09158942710155617,0.0,0.0,0.10818353396775043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31201855117902244,0.0,0.0,0.14797927429105007,0.0,0.0,0.16582757816549898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12265532116160753,0.12364649077311644,0.0,0.08785356984207593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175937115447457,0.0,0.106767900322389,0.07632300688382011,0.0,0.10379624130470223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473622115818768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MotionXBL,2020/02/06,"Personality Disorder Hi everyone, this is my first post! I'm a 21 year old living with Borderline Personality Disorder and recently I have been feeling like I'm slowly getting worse however I try my best to stay positive when I can. Most days are quite lonely as making and keeping friends is a big task for me. If anyone else here has coping methods or ideas i'd love to hear them, or if you'd like to know about it dont be shy:)",3.299458128078818,4.932507287356327,5.3973727422003295,78.50275862068966,73.82758620689657,9.109359605911333,28.52052545155993,9.606745405546679,2.7360456486042697,342,14,68,9,7,119,69,87,0.114,0.665,0.221,0.8909999999999999,1,2,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,3,3,6,0,0,2,0,10,1,0,1,0,13,19,8,0,2,4,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,2,8,5,7,16,2,9,0,1,0,1,8,1,0,5,8,39,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658924569978347,0.1854996120760412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18999311479712805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675754614014358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4149811737798278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21218066322438456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123792155051555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17299403148957254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154061467642384,0.12933692103611466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539948042999798,0.0,0.0,0.13987311927551369,0.0,0.09458732384850786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20404824910139294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20437514007496296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160919045263589,0.0,0.0,0.09949631784496983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689660942108368,0.0,0.15986399621331362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339807983923796,0.0,0.1208473893656321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18997382958694686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161589560620293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17338883493942173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19256116663306572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787577974289635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929673998360352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291609032090595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184497949655176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658554503756904
mentalhealth,panyhusan,2020/02/06,"I Think That Suicide Prevention Services Should Try Not To Separate Themselves According To Location Just getting some things off my head. I felt a bit depressed today, which was strange. Cause usually I only get it on Sundays (I like to call Sundays my suicide Sundays, usually on Sunday I try to die in some new interesting way). But I realized that after searching online for some mental health resources, most  of them are based on where you live. Unsurprisingly, when you're in the moment, and if you're in the 1% of people who probably want help (very unlikely by the way, If you actually wanna go, you're goona go, it's gotta be a miracle you get help for yourself if you're on the way out) then there's no way you're going to sift through various organizations looking for what you want. Then, once you finally land on the right country (most are American, i'm Canadian by the way) you need to find your right province (equivalent to state). After that you need to choose, phone call, text message, online chat (if you're given that luxury). Too many steps, too much checking. I tried using the suicide prevention hotline but got blocked because it's for American's only. 

When you want to die, at least for myself (by the way maybe it's different for other people who knows), and if you genuinely want to, it's illogical to call for help (that's why you just don't do it, something needs to break inside you to want to find help if you want to die, when you've decided to go from A to B, you can't really convince yourself otherwise), so any minor inconvenience is basically a deal breaker. 

Besides, you don't want to give away your ZIP or postal code if you want to die, I don't want any police, ambulance, or anyone else coming. Most of the times, at least when I'm personally feeling like dying, you only get a few seconds before you give up cause you'd rather die than go through all of these things. Conveniently, you already want to die, so things work out for the better I guess? I got so lost today trying to find the right resource that I just tired myself out, couldn't remember why I wanted to die and just continued on with my day to rant on reddit, it's amazing how things work like that.

tl;dr Suicide prevention services should get rid of some of the checks and balances to make it really easy for people genuinely wanting to access them in emergencies.",7.519407894736844,6.922144932017544,7.7085964912280724,73.63684210526318,63.49561403508772,11.021052631578947,35.2280701754386,10.411451182825502,3.565988596491228,1883,74,348,39,24,614,214,456,0.14800000000000002,0.747,0.105,-0.9878,1,0,1,0,0,8,62.0,0,21,2,4,17,9,0,0,17,0,14,3,1,5,1,74,57,25,12,27,17,0,2,3,0,3,2,0,0,1,25,9,0,4,11,1,2,7,7,2,0,1,6,3,40,7,70,45,14,61,0,2,1,0,39,24,0,17,25,215,65,4,0.0,0.0,0.056309890285298474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367679267594717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848015736028507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040347340913464286,0.059123632867655325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05421395080706912,0.0,0.0,0.0351752669689285,0.0,0.04910107800107804,0.0,0.0,0.051033692296380495,0.06299682731497615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676391384679654,0.0,0.0,0.1185539331995674,0.0,0.049706101079541744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03721371821353674,0.05948935017119614,0.049699585289349466,0.0,0.4790935630381717,0.060287445663437265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0482035258691241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02917641516355178,0.041223097719673474,0.055404013697689436,0.06321091258771974,0.15821873162877528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507374098135781,0.1107081202738281,0.1639699738815803,0.0,0.09230086177708477,0.0,0.06356645712510177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922001580577601,0.06133568440874732,0.0,0.0,0.15470865469108736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03171210819318647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457244255576535,0.0,0.05095288402542683,0.0,0.04845606117033427,0.0,0.0629897371188706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03851725942660908,0.0585018745485574,0.057970507890933526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058151140966159226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042418409208813734,0.12835832617900847,0.0,0.055730002127184576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061451905678070476,0.0,0.13165739626654985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001216752619592,0.05038411087989243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221368862520867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393215170995616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536635035405718,0.1478343660436207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044422656392600984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252471251479761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334147108892626,0.03697380895201391,0.0,0.0,0.03364713474901531,0.0663212113864919,0.10939156108403482,0.0,0.0,0.15670643655430974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049836941278112085,0.12710359878105282,0.047611090898136144,0.4084173172714488,0.2748121531993976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413612386794673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401707085930651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DonutFactoryRequiem,2020/02/06,"How do I stop feeling depressed and worthless, especially about not having close friends? I'm depressed pretty much every day these days. Low energy, low mood, lack of motivation. My life is kind of a mess right now, and I'm trying to clean it up. But it feels like my mental health is constantly deteriorating because I have no friends, and everyone else has tons of friends (or so it seems anyway). I'm going to university right now for a second degree (worst mistake of my life?) and I couldn't be any lonelier honestly. It is quite painful to have to walk the hallways, and see friends walk in pairs, groups, same gender, different genders, you name it.

It makes me feel so useless, especially because I **have** tried making friends before, at school, at work, at my old internship. Nothing really sticks. I never get close to anyone. It just feels like failure after failure.

I don't really mind the fact that I don't have friends right now (I do have a long-distance girlfriend, though). What I mind more is that I constantly feel like a failure about it to the point where I almost completely lose my will to live productively. I'm not suicidal or anything, but honestly given my situation I'm kinda surprised that I'm not suicidal.

I am on antidepressants. Do they help? A tiny, tiny bit. But it doesn't change that fact that I'm still a complete social failure.",3.3817878605769245,6.022827449218752,4.336718749999998,81.50756009615384,77.2421875,7.375961538461539,27.81490384615385,8.384062270229773,2.2738941105769226,1081,46,195,22,26,349,142,256,0.172,0.703,0.126,-0.7432,1,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,0,1,1,4,13,25,0,0,9,0,21,4,0,4,3,39,40,14,2,3,9,0,5,3,7,1,4,0,1,0,16,7,0,1,7,0,0,3,9,11,0,1,1,6,21,13,21,36,7,30,0,7,1,0,13,15,0,5,15,121,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836201890508456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679899643320178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868390615973881,0.0,0.08083398603775185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975880843396107,0.0,0.08358552899436897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724047924107867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039131142102436,0.0,0.20598219159105846,0.2123010126767238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669898296968388,0.0,0.16920875452550466,0.0,0.0,0.10262825670318364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205761203605401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276205511803861,0.09386188976276542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24833732729363506,0.21052416178784236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4553482633764884,0.0,0.05132052757877245,0.0,0.05582572751573334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441268982779267,0.0,0.0,0.06584073745833942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022902467597606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13876390427433,0.1439689847382643,0.0,0.08673788719996184,0.08692945421110325,0.0,0.10989297367141444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13113705994462194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989915919804413,0.0,0.1983663029676148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220951794053207,0.0,0.0757601561034418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425324496333053,0.0,0.10307466966902383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045224377312386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285802755246762,0.0,0.0,0.09993406935296403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447848887891698,0.0,0.0,0.12585585209010994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516607413187938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941285530375132,0.07827568746226854,0.0894238692394071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041335959371172,0.0,0.1001319573478568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844569826723684,0.0821237293184479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148928696671676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650936086998722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13338190249027648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151178342946292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,but-lifestillgoeson,2020/02/06,"Is it considered self harm to hit myself in the head I have anxiety and depression and I'm on medication and have a great support system etc. but sometimes if I do something wrong or make a mistake my self loathing comes out. I sometimes hit myself in the head, not incredibly hard or anything. I was wondering if it is self harm cause I don't really think of it as that",2.632065637065637,4.840345797297296,4.319343629343631,82.92391891891893,77.51351351351352,8.012355212355214,28.138996138996138,8.841846274778883,2.4384888030888034,295,13,58,7,7,99,50,74,0.273,0.653,0.073,-0.9573,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,4,0,7,3,2,2,0,16,15,9,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,1,1,8,2,7,12,1,6,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,5,0,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362657653413745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465823731946159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829842849518915,0.0,0.15343962225994834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15341950842353566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19865737559883168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19638434624427425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15956574793793502,0.0,0.36561696283221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189003685372504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17944302464443804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141119619610432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5574722366003084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13712995927314076,0.3523419828246414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20213507052945448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413583354747435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19316985429213265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19475262235810106,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CharlieFaulkner,2020/02/06,"Anyone else here dislike silence? Whether i'm on my own or with others around, I tend to find dead silence really uncomfortable (I always have to have music or a video or just... something on to make ambient noise).
My friend said they reckon it's like a sensory deprivation type of thing, that without anything to distract it my brain only has anxious thoughts to focus on, and they might be right on a subconscious level (like, I don't consciously notice these thoughts but they could be there producing the unease; who knows haha)

Anyways yeah, was just curious and interested to see if anyone else has a similar experience to discuss :)",5.887671497584544,8.010659834782611,6.323768115942031,72.48294685990342,68.04347826086956,9.285024154589372,33.647342995169076,9.725611199111238,3.684140096618358,511,24,81,12,9,165,83,115,0.106,0.746,0.14800000000000002,0.7389,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,3,1,6,8,0,2,5,2,10,1,1,2,0,23,18,8,1,2,9,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,7,4,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,2,9,5,15,10,1,7,0,1,1,0,7,7,0,5,2,60,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557982327813328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115272977650557,0.0,0.26184437233747343,0.3836979138661453,0.15408212433612495,0.16668281927479275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090211646835609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949547551137118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31282909083711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18315612339663606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113347719007785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466074476200186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290191221216212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829514877288272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498379559078265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986314811949827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21317336981090745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142404049058809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995039463426045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15990147847092445,0.17810760686112992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492056101554132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14414608642526686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243935794204524,0.0,0.0,0.2972944377799781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18049216082062905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DahliaSoSunny,2020/02/06,"“That’s not an option for me.” A short vent: 

I know there’s the whole joke about poor people not having the luxury of being crazy. And I can appreciate it, truly. 

But sometimes when I’m telling people, even within the mental illness community, my struggles I get this repeated back to me: 

“Oh I could stop doing [function]. That’s not an option for me because [reason].” 

Like it was totally an option for me to quit my job. Use up all my savings. Lose my house. Lose temporary custody of my kid. Etc etc etc. These things weren’t options, they just HAPPENED because of a LACK of options. I didn’t OPT into them. 

Might as well replace it with: “I couldn’t be homeless, that’s not an option for me because I need a place to live.” “I couldn’t be in a wheelchair, that’s not an option for me because I prefer to walk.” “I couldn’t be anorexic, that’s not an option for me, because I just love food too much.” Or whatever. Insert literally anything you find undesirable that you’d have little to no control over. 

I know it’s one of those things that’s just something to say, but it’s so frustrating. I hope people can relate. Kinda fits right up there with the whole “Why don’t you just [overly simplistic solution] and you’ll be cured!”",1.4196838407494177,3.889578860655739,3.090538641686184,88.4260655737705,84.1639344262295,5.4529274004683845,22.238875878220142,6.868970318607317,0.7682990632318498,958,33,188,12,28,316,132,244,0.102,0.83,0.068,-0.7108,2,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,4,2,4,13,10,1,1,14,0,21,3,0,3,2,46,30,8,0,8,13,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,17,5,1,2,5,1,1,1,13,4,1,1,3,1,31,6,28,15,9,17,0,2,0,1,10,12,0,12,5,143,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152788901840508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486848484975208,0.0,0.3760441494862412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13837661127238346,0.0985056515275061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4127903691879912,0.08148864695872761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11276337702604228,0.0,0.14918668035687238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445883821626915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10910093919860256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254014979243227,0.0,0.14235927378877836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243158649785173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356083837482326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06027525393329999,0.12365510720275524,0.10894321827969558,0.0,0.0,0.2760522444013372,0.0,0.0,0.11135160574027196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433393250769108,0.13088237889511953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069551413826046,0.0914816986607851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08360273216977877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25660003379791474,0.0,0.12890160151012398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122550233704108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268510179394411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053623814574362,0.0,0.0981135020542817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498082875010534,0.1220219626313805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031478130019086,0.0,0.1289793237189592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783601245282116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393098914512896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10655720232331348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109297898754536,0.0,0.11132759892144396,0.27548966935516184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The-Woe-Of-Ophelia,2020/02/06,"Dealing with insecurity. Hey. 

I've suffered from depression my entire life, it's something I can manage at this point, with medication and professional help (something I'm currently without, as my counselor is on leave for a few months, but she'll be back soon), but recently I've had a completely new issue: insecurity.

I'm writing the rest of this for context, you can probably skip to the TLDR if you get sick of the rambling. Names have been changed for privacy.

Insecurity is a relatively new thing for me, I was hurt in a past relationship when my partner at the time, Sarah, was spending a lot of time with another guy, of course, I thought it was fine, but then we break up for completely separate reasons and within a week she was together with him, and that hurt. But still, I wasn't feeling insecure then, just very badly depressed. For further context, this all happened during the biggest depressive spiral of my life, where I had to return home due to myself feeling extremely suicidal leaving Sarah in another city 200 miles away.

I've moved on a lot from then, I'm a new relationship now, with a girl who to be honest I'm completely in love with, and she tells me she feels the same. Everything has been great, but we had an argument before I had to leave for a month for university. This is where the insecurity started, I'm just constantly terrified that I'll lose her, to someone better, or to just not wanting me anymore.

I've spoken about this argument with my counselor, and she tells me to communicate how I was feeling about it with Alice, something I did, and it helped, to an extent. We're now at a point where we are so past the argument, but the insecurity has remained. 

I'm being as open as possible with her about it, ensuring that she knows that none of it is her fault, or based upon any of her actions, and she's being so supportive about it which helps, I'd go completely crazy if I was dealing with this alone.  She understands, but I feel so guilty for feeling this way about her. She's a saint, and these thoughts are an insult to her, and I hate it. 

I'm super struggling because of it right now. Are there anyways to feel less insecure? Or is this just something I'm stuck with? Like I'm not asking for a quick fix or anything, at this point I know those don't work, but are there any things that I could work on?

Thanks in advance for any replies. :)

TLDR: a super insecure guy asking for help.",5.89425678650037,6.368394080851065,6.572817314746883,76.80500000000002,66.70212765957447,9.972120322817316,33.653705062362434,9.921728534948242,3.232239911958916,1918,82,367,41,29,631,212,470,0.204,0.672,0.124,-0.9915,1,1,4,0,0,0,66.0,3,2,0,7,27,30,2,9,26,0,35,5,0,2,1,67,68,34,1,4,21,0,7,1,1,1,4,0,1,4,29,24,0,0,13,0,1,4,6,20,0,0,17,7,44,10,68,45,9,59,1,7,0,1,43,26,0,8,28,259,73,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968186119838216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695610960715786,0.16134692837795658,0.0,0.0,0.07629923339653517,0.0,0.0,0.0633112703782014,0.0,0.1438484076541253,0.0,0.07228333115293076,0.05915856571788013,0.06423783678090386,0.04689909945423624,0.0,0.06546635004979233,0.0,0.0,0.06804310007480655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138744100202021,0.0,0.3226611692469416,0.08313982443513708,0.0,0.0614266483616956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863401705586552,0.19879301516418596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06914456741264652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27230591266799664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040195565711359904,0.0,0.04372415492609411,0.0,0.0,0.08482153871673198,0.0,0.15235626307565664,0.0680337110019718,0.0,0.0,0.07595776931600037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206272679869,0.0,0.07717246876704795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16472185171418072,0.0,0.0,0.08030055837350537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845633562565144,0.0,0.0,0.24439040720099045,0.0,0.0,0.10868348194711022,0.03758674523602195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607102172997068,0.0,0.1308154341233758,0.06943719293514752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750431107881367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281818805599347,0.08177014362471209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22291403627353146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688706972122925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21818643286062026,0.08673309209797629,0.0,0.0,0.08294936248318767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910239415160247,0.07596441574435361,0.16519963247907188,0.0,0.06570240241017597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518710600243963,0.2369144867634727,0.0,0.0,0.054455264792557016,0.0,0.06144070157179105,0.0,0.0,0.08042957374685765,0.0,0.0841548291797193,0.08730536847166534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448984327193106,0.07083177021235594,0.0,0.0,0.10222490861847623,0.0,0.0,0.12215621126279268,0.08972328882894197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009245391849892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347975380339772,0.04537848615445659,0.06106773127226084,0.06171292892194179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741629701958978,0.0,0.11201975995135594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Xander125,2020/02/06,"Not at all coping  27/F/Uk here, i want to start by saying I've felt like this for a very long time its only recently started to become so difficult just to exist.

Sorry this is going to be long so We'll skip over roughly 13 years of emotional and physical abuse and say that for the last 7 years my depression and anxiety have been relitively up and down but i could cope usually. 

I also dont particularly want sympathy for this next part because its just the way life goes some times but I'm under a lot of stress with stuff at home so its definitely a factor into how badly I've degraded. My older brother has schizophrenia and my younger brother has pretty bad Asperger's so life was already pretty stressful. But 6 months ago my mother was diagnosed with terminal cancer. 3 months ago my dog got sick. 
I should mention that my mother is kind of a bitch, an example of this is that for about a year she's been threatening to kill my dog an occurrence that has happened as recently as this week. 

So i'm in a really awful place. I can't concentrate at work, i either have insomnia or just sleep all day long, which means i get called a lazy useless piece of sh*t a lot. Everything makes me tired, even just thinking about doing something makes me tired. My anxiety is in over drive, throwing completely horrific and vivid situations into my head. Something as simple as taking the bus to work can make me think ""what if a BIG truck smashed into the side of the bus right now?"" Followed by a marage of graphic images And i don't really mean to think them.. they just pop in to my head and once they're there i can't get them out. My partner wanted to talk about sex and brought up threesomes and they completely understood why i wouldn't want to have one and the subject was let go. But even that pops into my head unwanted and the thoughts are all very vivid and make me feel ill or so upset that i'll start to cry. 

I don't know if/how i should go about fixing these things. I've thought very hard about going to the doctor but i don't know how it all works and that just makes me even more worried about asking anyone for help.
And i know that at this point that i probably should, the biggest clue being that my work brought me in for a welfare check after i told them i wanted to quit my apprenticeship. I just don't know how to bring myself to go through with it, because I'm such a chicken and it feels like even if i did theres nothing they could do to help me..

Advice if you have it
Thanks",4.94620915841584,5.40131822178218,5.565875618811884,83.26614016089111,68.76237623762376,8.926361386138613,28.454517326732674,8.930421266530582,2.0363774752475248,1982,64,407,33,32,642,249,505,0.196,0.742,0.062,-0.9977,2,0,2,0,1,0,36.0,1,1,6,5,32,15,2,3,23,1,38,15,4,8,4,85,86,40,1,15,19,4,5,2,1,5,10,2,1,1,28,24,0,0,15,0,1,11,9,11,0,1,14,9,50,4,65,62,11,62,0,2,2,1,23,25,1,8,27,268,78,5,0.0,0.08530097022798361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035158214877764,0.12763645396587034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944703212186255,0.05757347641979805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015023577267168,0.0,0.0,0.050339791859437516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730455535944539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022375811588965,0.08777359685803253,0.07951157948492403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351379652992078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15096841794829124,0.0,0.0,0.1149625031691858,0.0,0.07908189193005957,0.04643009394852216,0.0,0.06200821968248516,0.07307226841843269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368878246313508,0.0,0.0,0.08437628618661717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098342009841787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19020510374736185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647034533245445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280453349765127,0.05143243921477648,0.06912541085919212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522765727457432,0.0,0.2045788934170293,0.0,0.057580079196180814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366394655477306,0.0,0.06449237162604321,0.0,0.2216594602332667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651195468750208,0.0,0.07221572739054083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965055672785143,0.07497054286867649,0.15826380522006026,0.05868461762390807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361861567998804,0.10170280709613108,0.07034514227232494,0.0,0.0,0.1911369435482068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241323726010858,0.0,0.0,0.2402823554952555,0.0,0.0,0.15684487282074178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492964951043487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656630360378665,0.0,0.0,0.0690800654595251,0.0,0.0,0.07667112803876333,0.04878491341858197,0.05475458666969145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796235167605763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521827703450512,0.0,0.06805748305283793,0.0,0.0,0.14648730778924976,0.07762157468859962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657434875240414,0.0,0.0,0.09224224061709044,0.0,0.1421705337776716,0.0,0.0,0.06148237651537785,0.0,0.1145048392244347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092413275858179,0.07204586885754465,0.0,0.0,0.11084880569666464,0.0,0.08059124966717622,0.15287290740081286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16493748283992107,0.0,0.08241576334014368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054130434809214714,0.057865950241465076,0.0,0.06628228810050799,0.0,0.0,0.0478295320290893,0.13839230576956335,0.0,0.11431019108957033,0.08396041580854934,0.16549273887576754,0.0,0.06879323350075826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929108291109785,0.17820746188602887,0.21231926604665907,0.05714538752451381,0.05774914451618171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496327492565529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20964959593090368,0.0731132754813738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908508669675276
mentalhealth,takeawayaddicted,2020/02/06,"Books Hello fellow humans,
I'm here to ask if any of you know any books that actually helped you change your mind/situation.
I search for some books with the topic selflove|self recognition|depression and generell mental health issues.

:)",6.995000000000001,10.563858179487184,5.458653846153847,73.29259615384616,69.76923076923077,8.002564102564103,22.57051282051281,8.841846274778883,1.971097435897436,195,5,29,4,4,57,34,39,0.0,0.9229999999999999,0.077,0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,4,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,2,0,14,5,3,0.0,0.0,0.28613953518552376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3987980732084941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27412026816042634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101869185233883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525491731835359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31167818189812885,0.0,0.0,0.19653857571998806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30604455000577824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161145543920914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29549587758491697,0.0,0.2960676942657527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3058914603339678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notajacob,2020/02/06,"I don’t feel positive emotions for more than 2 seconds. Every positive emotion I have very quickly fades away into nothingness. I never really feel compassion or empathy although I can understand pain I just never feel others pain or emotions like that. Most of my feelings are angry, sadness, and self hatred, it sounds like textbook depression. And I absolutely have depression but maybe it’s my brain. It’s frustrating not having these feelings, it makes me feel self centered and upset at times.",5.383333333333333,8.577747563218395,5.812183908045977,70.60954022988507,73.36781609195403,8.924137931034483,33.804597701149426,9.444778638647367,4.213680459770115,406,21,56,11,9,130,62,87,0.259,0.657,0.084,-0.9402,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,9,1,1,0,0,6,3,1,1,2,20,14,7,0,0,5,0,6,2,0,0,2,1,0,2,7,4,0,0,7,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,0,7,9,2,6,14,2,9,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,3,7,44,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397558585827155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17106837485506987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639736378708705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5171287319665449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911270949568496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4649015322309384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973227103804948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228999932758956,0.0,0.15395184656069014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23637883357005846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261198654220672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817053265573476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197289484662411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935644545038424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952997450194234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264404199170954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gonZAA24,2020/02/06,i have these tiny excitement windows when im going through an anxiety or kind of depression moment these excitement windows make no sense at all and they feel like everything thats about to happen literally is going to be the best thing ever,6.898666666666667,8.228718422222222,7.304444444444448,69.41000000000001,64.77777777777777,11.333333333333336,35.0,11.20814326018867,4.4816666666666665,199,9,32,6,3,65,39,45,0.141,0.625,0.23399999999999999,0.7357,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,1,1,3,6,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,2,6,8,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,5,6,7,2,6,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386995758848653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3274527772226088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268748144491162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822460192651117,0.0,0.0,0.2804294835778605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577700778076448,0.22291194097175349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3546639351325324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759241854578278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370423863190961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32492779813097883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524404873777893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082802490507743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20729667857774545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NomadicRav3n,2020/02/06,"I'm stuck in a very bad cycle it seems. Hi everyone, 

I'm going on 25 years old and I've been struggling heavily with keeping job. I was doing well for a while, but I had a major breakdown back in 2015 which lead me on a ""depression/suicide"" road trip across the country...I don't know exactly what my intentions were...but ever since then I've never been the same, and I don't know how to get back up. Since then, I've had 20+ jobs, most of them haven't lasted a month. One thing I want to mention is that most of my employers have all told me I""m a good hard worker, so I don't think I'm lazy...I don't know what it is. I have a lot of anxiety when it comes to work and being in a social situation. Since I struggle with work I don't have health insurance..I tried going to see a psychiatrist, but they told me I need health insurance...

So I'm in this constant cycle of trying to get a job, last long enough to qualify for their health insurance but I never can... I'm tired of living this way. I want to be mentally strong, I want to go to college and make a successful life for myself. But whatever these mental problems I'm having is costing me greatly...I have roughly 10k in debt, most of it in collections..and I just feel ruined and defeated. I don't believe in God, but every night I'm praying to wake up and start life all over and just make things better...but because of these issues it seems life is always going to be harder than it needs to be... Can I get some advice and help? 

Thanks",2.8260869565217384,3.791168681528664,4.540717252838551,86.82390335087238,73.96815286624205,7.75386319579064,24.480199390750485,8.18289091462,1.2761148158404874,1162,34,254,18,23,394,160,314,0.098,0.792,0.109,0.6642,5,0,0,0,0,1,54.0,0,0,3,7,10,11,0,2,13,0,28,8,1,5,6,49,64,20,0,6,7,0,3,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,16,11,0,1,7,0,2,7,9,6,1,1,8,4,25,5,38,52,10,40,1,2,1,0,9,14,0,7,18,158,41,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094664297785907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806070528731381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410845926905167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14898048267834332,0.08088586845961343,0.059053582427878,0.0,0.0,0.1091439928885071,0.0,0.08567731290526924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344850203587721,0.0,0.1046865405189821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10009689260398563,0.0,0.0,0.0876282144407728,0.08162064916517177,0.09256740136986903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04898248076788598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518382344603786,0.0,0.22022324667764406,0.08125344050103561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678020999749769,0.0,0.0,0.3089180728778936,0.0,0.0,0.06493270044102628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111144346261207,0.2883979365815648,0.08610619524101118,0.0,0.0,0.15971849738644658,0.1579307230490834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052752302624246,0.0,0.0,0.08554164889186369,0.0857305739226123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823589377167202,0.0,0.0,0.1293284941634948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952527154579173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773240219578684,0.0,0.0,0.14366190884468558,0.1494306325090255,0.0,0.0,0.09090982694174378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165312399350612,0.0,0.0656444308750571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926954780040816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719615487324873,0.1763811748698591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24040589279608554,0.10889060299062177,0.0,0.0987509958429009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856802167805204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20254778953842492,0.0,0.10596459632488008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918870147665599,0.0,0.0,0.12871776084259556,0.062073043441264276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134258417394534,0.0,0.1851348027397381,0.0,0.13154237715115855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993131888147036,0.17141665002689954,0.07689419081253204,0.0,0.0,0.08710149458603622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410510693130373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062383776182868486
mentalhealth,ZIELSZIEK,2020/02/06,"19 year old seeking some life advice Hello r/mentalhealth and thank you for taking your time to read this. I feel like I'm in the phase to becoming an adult, and I find it tough. I can't talk to my parents about this because they are either too busy or have other problems, that I have to listen to, but they will rarely listen to mine. I failed admission into College because of mental and physical health issues, but I am preparing for the new round, as of this year, and so far things have been alright.

Now, I'm struggling with coping with the materialistic nature of today's society. I'm part of the upper middle class, so to speak, but have been born modest and I have come to despise money. There's a saying in my mother tongue: ""when you have too much money, you have to take care of it""

I recently kept distracting myself with material possessions, just to ""get out of the daily grind"" by living in a fantasy of watches, clothes and stupid crap. Although I am not poor anymore, I still feel like it, and I have this stupid urge of needing to compensate with it.

How can I stop constantly checking my savings? How should I approach this feeling of ""not being good enough""? How can I disconnect myself from the material stuff that surrounds me?

P.s I have sought professional help, but, after 4 years of therapy I decided it is not for me. I saw one of the best therapists available. Thank you for taking your time to read this once again!",6.5933619133573975,6.667621303249098,6.881008574007223,76.56461755415162,65.20938628158845,9.81308664259928,31.752933212996393,9.516144504307137,2.7988196750902525,1139,40,211,20,16,369,162,277,0.12300000000000001,0.7709999999999999,0.106,-0.7246,1,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,6,2,2,14,18,4,2,10,1,21,3,1,3,0,39,40,20,0,3,10,2,4,2,0,2,2,4,0,1,16,14,0,2,5,3,4,2,4,9,0,1,4,10,33,9,41,33,6,28,0,1,3,0,18,9,1,2,19,157,49,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894039562342735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085933242896056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608714681104379,0.14572884080628778,0.0,0.0,0.13847379538684795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345322183609922,0.0,0.0,0.1136635787551392,0.0,0.14259149718189798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634002717923366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001542481130113,0.18853077237713226,0.0,0.0,0.12060026752213822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893863360666262,0.0,0.0,0.11067372820598764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025709608842027,0.0,0.0,0.08844356615520005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772192713677875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320046388762064,0.12892859261641293,0.0,0.1165146133058757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329749597605972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699872029910928,0.0978395435010992,0.0,0.12743851052953514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384597396340831,0.14052286075536918,0.08941300031240171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14651529469613944,0.1428894157289156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12625870455808053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263972198680708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13028509318041914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493224757314208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053757532512335,0.11031643580061257,0.0,0.13794319889638096,0.15105162963089847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29763081936699104,0.10605672664875113,0.0,0.24296438514862845,0.15089677248865074,0.1532045748281208,0.0876619770863436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15388266902324266,0.0,0.12507354276817725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25491517825529936
mentalhealth,Difficult-Bat,2020/02/06,"Has anyone had ECT or TMS therapy? How did it go? I'd love to talk about your experience with ECT or TMS. I have depression and C-PTSD and recently found out that I have severe paradoxical insomnia. Therapy and such has helped a bit but I still have a lot of sleep misperception. I am interested in trying to find some additional help with my mental health along with therapy. I have heard ECT can help some people with paradoxical insomnia but from reviews, it scares me a bit. I have heard TMS has helped a lot of people though.

To my understanding, TMS is very similar to ECT it is just much more gentle. I am very interested, you can also privately DM me if you wish! Thank you.",2.8437412587412574,5.25014446969697,4.72909090909091,79.24248251748253,77.78787878787878,9.213053613053614,23.79020979020979,9.661875296680813,2.4574958041958044,538,18,106,17,13,183,77,132,0.05,0.7509999999999999,0.198,0.9729,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,4,0,0,7,6,0,1,4,0,16,5,1,1,0,25,24,11,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,10,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,5,2,15,4,15,19,8,5,0,1,0,1,12,2,0,7,2,74,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139622830777292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740011018357296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041537698781328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997680574892901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625976713096138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12731546899872845,0.0,0.0,0.15273261194354834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916602760571978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14806681888677412,0.0,0.0,0.3734729395323225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23685165068530464,0.1257215089018676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14037920242506702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102399752677917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314281231885105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16283142242356272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753956009063764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13946118313263595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573666214418108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13939818393747538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11124323122925373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119621222339084,0.0,0.12824650094373558,0.4778967846715698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685916989958669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457391640505466,0.0,0.0,0.14501369846116158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22987019191101385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601853480752864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tiestes,2020/02/06,"🌈 22m gay, Seeking advice on changing Romantic relationship dynamic I don't like having a crush / being in love. It always causes me mostly stress, worry and jelousy. 

I don't know if I just lack the emotional maturity, if it's an aspect of my personality, or if I have unhealthy ideas about relationships. But being in love with someone actually makes my life worse. 

I don't know how to fix it, and I don't think I'll ever be in a successful relationship if I don't.

I also get these intense feelings way too quickly, after meeting someone just a couple of times.

It's so exciting at first when someone you find attractive shows signs of interest as well and gives you attention. The first messages, asking you how you are, what you're doing. But then you get hooked on that feeling. And if a day or two without communication passes you wonder if something is wrong, and you can't stop thinking about it. And you look and see that they're online many times a day.

And if I see them again after feeling ignored for a few days (key word feeling), I might still feel resentful, even though it's completely irrational, and the resentfulness is bound to show in some way or another.

I'm aware and fully conscious that this is toxic, unhealthy behavior on my part. I know that I shouldn't be the only focus of attention of a potential partner. When someone does give me that much attention, it actually turns me off. 
But the feelings of worry are just all-consuming.

And I never want to be the one texting first because I'm convinced that I'd be annoying him and coming off as needy and clingy (which I literally am).

It doesn't happen to me with everyone I sleep with. Only when I find someone seriously attractive (as in, I could imagine myself dating them long term), and they also show signs of attraction to me. But if that happens, I go 0 to 100 in no time.

I actually think I might have Borderline Personality Disorder traits because of what I've described, but this dynamic really only shows up with people I'm romantically interested in.

How can I stop feeling jelous and needy of someone's attention who I literally met twice? I would like to have a healthy relationship once and for all and not scare them off. And also be happy and in love instead of feeling like crap all the time.

Thank you for taking the time to read :)",6.387375851187509,6.823921318385652,7.36163926258097,71.70457814316559,65.63677130044843,10.463909649559877,34.23152300282345,10.338469443840273,3.6156855339644576,1852,79,332,43,27,624,217,446,0.10099999999999999,0.738,0.162,0.9833,0,0,1,0,0,0,52.0,0,9,4,4,24,28,4,2,17,0,31,7,2,5,4,94,70,50,0,13,21,0,8,3,1,4,1,0,0,3,22,24,0,4,24,5,0,3,12,9,1,6,1,11,46,19,49,57,9,48,0,0,3,4,31,16,1,16,30,240,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.21257923287255245,0.0,0.0,0.07095651395630158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17420559957507006,0.06041977393742056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761409874317215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788328671252401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885283352587684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459348036937333,0.07681485088973565,0.06254960885816334,0.076133274675009,0.0,0.0,0.057975515343242565,0.0803448249634082,0.0,0.14048799651514082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322070767322169,0.0,0.06354406361238654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167977183925014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04796015486214609,0.06568255156758948,0.0,0.06938476554333582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937222299440711,0.05187469107989818,0.0,0.0,0.1327338034631174,0.18529356127335572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758745169655854,0.1393138763683996,0.04126760099072596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842274684523158,0.07729781329182432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197115851272864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971850057464965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051288659264623636,0.10642502805797176,0.0,0.0,0.06426015728526538,0.06097657243647942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19660801061613795,0.0,0.04846969404354284,0.07361811308889211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406168576379134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05337885786195474,0.0,0.05600356739087413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733039969481938,0.049204400016506535,0.16567621400396568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863272617052852,0.0,0.05034066223896992,0.12680561781180275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263257922081359,0.0,0.04651770176160018,0.0,0.0,0.3118364450260587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269820948798454,0.0,0.11572620657947677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266536931995726,0.0,0.3691481952887423,0.0559009803917495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05798877900191906,0.12141532029041473,0.08317786498602191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054595885915942416,0.0,0.0,0.06685222928907526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139582299016617,0.07134183419517763,0.0,0.21170591456981636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898201556697165,0.07093228068966753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04282898693755457,0.11527352658100468,0.0,0.0,0.06528774375093822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699962724838147,0.07874562418233476,0.0,0.14748390849587056,0.07399877828052223,0.051582141487910016,0.07939083903610827,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ConnorEllis2597,2020/02/06,"Downward spiral. Where to start, I’ve always had trouble with mental health from an early age and suffered with anxiety and depression. But as I got older they wrongly diagnosed me with ADD for maybe 5-6 years of my life. Then I get accessed when I was 20 and got told I have a borderline personality disorder and since then my life has just become worse and worse got hooked on drugs on my 18th birthday. MDMA and mdma pills, ket, coke anything I could get my hands on was in a really abusive relationship in this time too and was also selling what I was using I’m not proud but I thought I was invincible this went on for about 2 years, until one day I just thought to myself no but this is when the bpd got worse.. once I’d quit all the really bad drugs I started smoking weed again I know replacing a drug for a drug is bad but I feel has helped me, so getting back to it I just went into some sort of hole anxious depressed was hearing stuff and seeing stuff that wasn’t there, sleep paralysis the whole works lmao. Still to this day they affect me and I’m still just a shell of who I used to be.. and to top it off it should be a positive I know, I have a child on the way and I’ve never been more scared. The girl and I are no longer together and to be honest with you I couldn’t hate her more she’s childish where she doesn’t need to be I don’t know how or what to do from here but I’m  done and I’m fed up of feeling empty all the time",1.4735994397759136,3.262684049019612,3.0558029878618136,92.6189705882353,79.42483660130719,6.201493930905696,21.0592903828198,7.1686216300943375,0.40513295985060704,1133,31,257,14,28,373,167,306,0.163,0.755,0.083,-0.9665,0,0,4,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,2,4,19,11,1,1,14,0,27,13,2,4,3,51,57,29,0,4,11,0,3,0,0,1,9,1,0,3,13,20,2,0,7,0,1,2,8,9,0,1,20,5,33,2,35,30,6,38,0,3,1,0,14,14,0,3,21,173,46,1,0.0,0.11181523302274096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546914958415213,0.07852495502291057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219422151654868,0.10661335014262743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766000722428235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256614207208502,0.15759313748330406,0.0,0.10422631494520028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885806542534735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534825832803409,0.0,0.0,0.1217240966954118,0.0,0.16256470505766454,0.09578546057412723,0.0,0.0,0.10815833792729863,0.0,0.0,0.09657518725186713,0.0,0.0,0.4377656280528919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543450509876178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791621957106302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30191121885629835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317268281907663,0.0,0.10031288377324524,0.10636395515855986,0.0,0.06325547455099771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555929335778644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13331528403636053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480922690266554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951046475025233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997554511941327,0.07278540325301122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050296057427838,0.0639488208318581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240187596230937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003760991982928,0.0,0.0,0.1209140716872655,0.0,0.0,0.1013200696742833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448270422532187,0.0,0.07520216126625774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806538529064716,0.0,0.09444002328580102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13359378928672594,0.0,0.15073099305785312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21606642358218053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14984144517222914,0.11005799152375112,0.0,0.0,0.09017636509545417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630139892050291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490799700344031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17496733616241825,0.0,0.10536282158126324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870384463237662,0.0,0.2885189909306907,0.0,0.10318082406264106,0.0,0.12154477913064927
mentalhealth,doubleletterplastic,2020/02/06,"Why am I changing and how do I reverse it? I'm becoming reclusive despite having extroverted habits, and friends I used to like hanging out with are becoming a burden. I don't enjoy anything anymore. I used to care about people a lot,even if I  hate them, but now I just flip between being overly emotional and completely apathetic. It's like a switch in my brain turns off and I just become the biggest jerk on the planet. At one moment I don't want to hurt anyone and the other I enjoy being incredibly sadistic.  


This started happening just a few months ago and I don't know why. I become analytical and ""emotionless"" (I'm not a crazy psycho, I consider myself pretty normal other than a few odd qualities that most don't have, but I'm not special. But it's almost like I just don't feel? I know I do, but it just sort of disappears? I don't understand) and very judgmental, and see myself above others (the best word I can think of is god-complex) and then later I'll go back to how I usually am. I hurt people when I'm like that, but I do it secretly (such as covert bullying) and they'll come to me for emotional aid, since that's what I'm known for, but I'll just feel like I'm tricking them and it feels good. I hate that when I change, but I don't remember a lot of it.  


I'm often told I used to do things as a child  and not remember doing them, but I can't see how that would relate to what I do now since I remember a good amount of what I do, though I do have very bad memory problems.. The only thing I ever remember as a child that was like this was killing small rodents for fun, but I regret that. I was a very violent child, but I've outgrown that thanks to counseling and my own self-discipline. I'm not insecure and I'm pretty confident in myself too, if that's relevant. I don't know, I typically don't deal with stuff like this.  


I don't know what to do, I'm an adult and I feel like this is some edgy fanfic but it's real, and I want it to go away. I don't know what I should do. Is there anyone who deals with the same thing or have any idea how to fix this? I want to get over this. (If it's relevant, I was a victim of drug abuse during my first few years of life, and physical and mental abuse after that, but I've overcome that, or at least for the most part.)  


Thanks for reading, or skimming. And sorry, I'm not very good putting words together like this, so it's long.",3.2192331723942083,3.9414769443339988,4.981855154785574,84.94223459244536,72.79721669980121,8.531871627378585,25.5046293666572,8.841846274778883,1.6593939108207896,1865,56,409,35,35,638,212,503,0.135,0.688,0.17800000000000002,0.9709,0,0,1,0,2,0,64.0,0,0,4,2,23,35,7,1,20,0,42,3,1,7,1,99,85,50,1,11,29,0,4,9,1,3,2,0,0,4,42,25,0,0,18,1,0,6,17,14,0,2,5,6,53,21,43,75,13,35,0,3,2,0,14,12,0,13,26,279,95,1,0.0,0.16923174064520638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330566703020897,0.0,0.07151246008012857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04856509269529707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082513739204932,0.09987096954842434,0.0,0.058768997057903886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709735644989852,0.05491422860187881,0.059629086862911525,0.0,0.31549190968683904,0.0,0.0,0.07494632137754621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972348684348862,0.0,0.0,0.0728130173997873,0.0,0.151096582084851,0.06151826111580521,0.0748779529809525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725280389965986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281948401315511,0.0,0.0,0.16066599371646104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716936498602738,0.0645995463736615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444395989604796,0.10203871293236456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060746117594115474,0.0,0.0,0.055175556022101516,0.0,0.03731173089594228,0.0,0.08117432226081826,0.1797001832513856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315262571464374,0.0,0.0,0.14101634337111474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290386626164207,0.08061957900945331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901083846049875,0.0,0.19624087486154296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05044298742259675,0.3140107245197943,0.0,0.0,0.06320060520573087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143006793577305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197018065073234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700329253703423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997217654072795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839309443366616,0.054314821892734164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733619232976006,0.0,0.0990212428468395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453107861103331,0.0,0.06833513461581127,0.0,0.07179245596936419,0.0,0.0,0.0714349786607382,0.08128664750179063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3236000508535697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381805776661914,0.0,0.07450210080655183,0.0,0.0,0.11815153159129962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994397616754424,0.050548366464038666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175383614851528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149987578354855,0.0,0.0,0.14233615874288813,0.04576026652977745,0.07016551605384876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06824071648206295,0.0,0.0,0.07767972247627299,0.0,0.07434621293458059,0.0,0.18504058255467276,0.07865425177946223,0.2357015704927529,0.12636840660624035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288830369021421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0507316305712041,0.0,0.0,0.045989338801524386
mentalhealth,Eevee32,2020/02/06,"Casual Self Harm I know that I have issues, serious ones. I hate myself. I'm incredibly anxious about everything, and I get embarrassed too easily. This all leads to my depression, which I've had for a very long time. I have self destructive issues that have been taking a bit of a toll on me, one of them being self harm. I punish myself for being imperfect and whenever I get embarrassed or get way too anxious, or just fail to be what I want to be, I hurt myself in some way, wether that's jumping down a small flight of stairs to make my ankles hurt when I land, or knocking the wind out of myself. I'm really not ok with these self destructive habits and I know they're only making things worse but I can't stop feeling like I need to knock some sense into myself. I'm not comfortable in my own body.",4.395673400673399,5.237747265432102,5.522772166105501,81.69792929292932,70.17283950617283,9.34769921436588,24.603815937149268,9.573946990214177,1.9569061728395056,635,16,128,14,11,211,100,162,0.26899999999999996,0.691,0.04,-0.9826,0,0,0,0,0,2,16.0,0,0,1,2,5,17,4,2,5,1,10,1,1,3,1,25,25,8,0,2,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,8,6,0,1,3,1,0,2,3,13,0,2,2,1,23,4,19,19,5,17,0,4,0,0,5,9,0,5,5,84,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30846251873048514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904691521999933,0.1516454197865991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175863958680631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269737650280675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902974106239801,0.09753150774101403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21398168985845706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347874369429354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29229973972355433,0.0,0.0,0.2849874751646085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15005809348731006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666978651296872,0.0,0.0,0.12081787664149192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822592960613987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122950300406433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18502199131019006,0.10383130715093082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745963580713809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5696898373347709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413869658079827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10264772587535782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069930270785186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960720966562343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126451367645175,0.08052434788683642,0.2167299817314172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912781486402062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dunkirkcousins,2020/02/06,"I’ve gotten the impression that personality disorders are never talked about,they’re lesser known mental illnesses. Depression and anxiety is always talked about over the last couple of years,but personality disorders are never really talked about as much. Do you think it’s because a personality disorder can just be seen as someone’s personality/quirk? Unfortunately I think it’s because personality disorders are hard for people to separate from a person’s personality as an illness to treat.",12.657195121951224,12.513696548780494,12.983048780487804,38.49335365853659,53.02439024390244,16.492682926829268,46.109756097560975,14.90622815163357,7.812112195121951,415,21,52,17,4,143,56,82,0.21100000000000002,0.735,0.055,-0.9042,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,0,7,2,0,0,2,7,11,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,2,2,2,11,8,1,4,0,1,1,0,10,1,0,0,3,33,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011570387447484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930016917674864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821744035412435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451630223213787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470916005777317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5573248492577769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089039823700048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909681411876872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12251525020818532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936887447617442,0.0,0.18752652210418516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428221406154393,0.6369080828070993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788167106167315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300694584980837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931431547343792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579592694636052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InfinityVive,2020/02/06,"Why does my hand slightly tremble when I move my mouse? So I have noticed that when I play games I noticed that my hand slightly trembles to the right and to the left back and forth while I am moving I move my mouse horizontally... I don't exactly notice it while I am moving the mouse but because of the stutters and shaking that happens in-game I noticed it...

So what is happening to me? I am only 14 years old...",2.6810714285714283,4.343016392857148,4.120952380952383,86.8907142857143,75.54761904761905,6.2285714285714295,28.66666666666667,6.868970318607317,1.414852380952381,323,14,66,3,7,107,49,84,0.076,0.83,0.094,0.1035,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,3,4,0,6,2,2,0,1,5,8,10,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,0,2,0,5,1,4,0,0,0,2,15,1,4,8,0,14,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,7,46,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11042662614106237,0.0,0.0875428479196576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567339667590158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25398631892568585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560318383313445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6105354969292601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6540001977638613,0.15069371930466596,0.0,0.0,0.10922128351379844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264148968921493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12958498456837705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924796296262065
mentalhealth,allergic2socks,2020/02/06,"Getting medications without sounding like a druggie? I have crippling anxiety and depression, and I think I may be ADD. My mom has a Xanax prescription and my sister has an Adderall prescription. My mom has, on multiple occasions, allowed me to take her Xanax (maybe 5 times a year?), mainly before exams, big presentations, etc. It works great for me. However, it is also decidedly illegal. I have brought up a Xanax prescription with my psychiatrist a few times, and she always shoots it down immediatley. She does not know I have taken it before and I know it works. My thought process is that she sees me, an 18 year old high school student, as a little addict or wannabe dealer. 

Another aspect to this is the Adderall. My sister has really bad ADHD and takes it most mornings. I have taken maybe 3 annually since she got them. I take them like the Xanax, maybe the day before an exam to study. The thing is, they don't really do all that much. I took my first one last year and I was like, ""This doesn't seem to do as much as it should."" Since then I have notice that I do a lot of blank staring rather than schoolwork, I can never stay on top of anything in school, etc. My research shows that these, along with other things I do, are symptoms of ADD. 

I am fully able to understand that a measly self diagnosis is worthless. However, I'm afraid that if I bring it up to my psychiatrist, she will instantly brush me off as a patient with a ""history of pursuing drugs.""  I just want her to listen to me and understand that I don't want to get high or whatever, I just want to function. Do I try and reason with her or get a new psychiatrist? Anyone else been through anything similar?",3.9751210826210834,5.76170892901235,5.112592592592595,80.60320512820516,72.3641975308642,8.564862298195633,28.2022792022792,9.162432508145574,2.438754415954417,1319,51,252,29,26,435,169,324,0.081,0.893,0.026000000000000002,-0.9507,3,0,2,1,0,0,49.0,0,0,3,4,4,8,0,1,18,0,31,8,0,2,2,44,56,19,0,6,9,4,0,3,0,3,8,2,0,1,21,16,0,0,9,1,0,3,6,4,0,2,8,5,45,4,34,44,9,30,0,2,2,0,17,12,0,8,17,180,66,8,0.09809101372602808,0.0,0.0,0.10693368373879687,0.11788633652580432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844334823739751,0.08161958132733019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285698060478264,0.07503935701350023,0.0,0.0,0.06858751752690873,0.10050583542202124,0.161441092800983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819018991968529,0.0,0.0,0.25040468380893066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326058898619102,0.0,0.08448564638805757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858401071353238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375443408642533,0.0,0.08194245520413095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187948189859757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834361661655419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374551834368078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845234446134182,0.10814568892464484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072770831438247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781651168439536,0.07995726821991485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437669436141532,0.0983129651874107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339347210202339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956368228484437,0.0,0.0,0.09881637663093816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22976601948802464,0.0,0.0,0.14421636317065015,0.0,0.07565383690469353,0.0947369123003932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167726926994444,0.10293001822089996,0.0,0.0664690095161451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256792303137011,0.10085389914562304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19854668544005866,0.07816583805328507,0.08929837485534692,0.10233032017143393,0.0,0.0,0.16228380039747448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455196920727608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195412163969668,0.22125670423407795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033462178425706,0.06285276085410033,0.0,0.07787330802590843,0.11439531786136722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898272548608218,0.06659735945672557,0.0,0.0,0.20423240930838785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17356986403842886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455623684590336,0.0,0.14282285250176696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18950219039804625
mentalhealth,im-gone-bro,2020/02/06,"Only I seem to face consequences, and I'm starting to feel lonely and hopeless A couple weeks ago my friend's mom found weed in her house that seemed to belong to me. The truth is I was holding it for one of my friends who also smokes it with her son. The thing is her son is my lifelong friend, and so is my other friend, and I chose not to betray them and took all the blame myself. I told her that I'm holding it for another friend, and I don't smoke since my father literally died from smoking and drugs. My friend's mom clearly said she wouldn't tell anyone, and today I hear her outright telling some relatives that could easily tell my mom.

The thing is that everyone uses me as some kind of scapegoat. Tbh her son (my friend), is the one who smokes the most weed, and is even the reason my other friend also came into contact with it. He also lies to his mom and tells her he goes to college, while hes actually lying and dropped out. He also has a girl that he cheats on all the time. Meanwhile, I struggle really hard to study and be kind to everyone, and I have been having a hard time getting a job lately to fit in with my college schedule.

He has a very easy job that he only goes like 2 days to work for a short period of time, I know it's easy because I went with him to work couple times and he basically has no boss, and it's off the books). Yet, everyday I have to listen my mom and everyone around me (including the mom of the girl I like) mention that he has a job and goes to college, why can't I do the same. 

I guess idk what to say, I'm in shock because it feels as if people have become completely delusional to the truth. It also breaks my heart that i constantly get betrayed so easily, while I try to remain a good person. I know it may seem shallow, but honestly to God I always try my best to help everyone. Even when I had a bully in middle school, I showed him nothing but kindness and he actually apologized for bullying me last year. 

I honestly didn't even feel like writing this because it felt egotistical, but I have nowhere or no one left it feels. Please help me, these days I've just been feeling completely hopeless and I feel like I have no friend, even though I hang out with that friend. I just feel lonely. I don't want my friend to get in trouble either, I just want equality, where it's not just me always getting the hurt :(",5.574987756351391,5.071896814049588,6.224251606978883,82.36580501989596,67.4297520661157,9.401775329048057,29.70278543005816,8.841846274778883,2.0806858891949798,1854,57,392,27,27,608,213,484,0.133,0.7120000000000001,0.155,0.9259999999999999,4,4,4,0,0,2,49.0,0,0,1,3,20,33,1,1,23,0,31,3,2,3,5,76,64,37,1,5,12,10,10,4,11,2,1,4,0,3,30,29,0,2,15,2,0,4,10,9,0,3,12,14,62,24,47,48,9,43,0,5,0,0,63,16,0,10,25,254,92,11,0.0,0.0,0.11129481385750904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05054852498189225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22801121628455304,0.0948974281656592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05979486031136105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039872656240833096,0.0,0.0,0.050763640210155295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428429454915422,0.06297876409224147,0.0,0.0,0.059843394378042224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522050928248864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195776066949732,0.0616229170073162,0.0,0.045529194699990255,0.12619241613423682,0.0,0.07355180094539608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059182131070260185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661299841391558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506558219022262,0.0,0.0,0.21795632041786886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201832091551178,0.08147621961427952,0.0547521879389375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252410722443667,0.4846244282847999,0.0,0.1191711927092511,0.0,0.0,0.04782920512734227,0.0,0.0,0.0628186005822017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021649899221499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427043346366698,0.06757396803736647,0.07644425712229452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579828662793684,0.06104560038729453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16976319995811254,0.0,0.0,0.17814583097631306,0.0626780332994422,0.04648234525237005,0.06432579708386939,0.0,0.06195697525751528,0.0,0.0,0.11143660203716424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4007164207660516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05471627119263717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592324941923147,0.08673896856727703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039533409903042,0.04979134405468502,0.0,0.06259546281676702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036531171615481486,0.05863038926293562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424308583648671,0.04534794368097693,0.0,0.05771154884853786,0.0,0.15573810797607873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04717101901352421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04036203210341355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596140896569149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993667055849732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576870774837181,0.0,0.05602600063313206,0.0,0.1330051108164873,0.0,0.054052287114864914,0.054489080104467215,0.06335599984050751,0.07743139614649049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04925061187895095,0.0,0.04705094852976872,0.06726871761427278,0.0,0.04574138474639362,0.0,0.0,0.05286201759034893,0.05145548349945697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302861375473998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0367217241420146
mentalhealth,Ukeluke82,2020/02/06,"Denial We’ve all found ourselves in it but, not until we’ve come out of it. Denial is one of the biggest factors I’ve seen in my own mental health and others and, it is basically a paradox. No matter the amount of proof, logic, or science you can provide, a person in denial will not accept or see that they are. It’s horribly sad that we have to come to breaking points where the denial has hurt ourselves or others to finally come out of it and even more sad there is no way to avoid it. The only thing you can do is learn to accept the nature of it and people and learn that you are going to come across it indefinitely. Be it yourself or someone you love. 
Just don’t ever stop loving. 

This is something that has been effecting my life for years and I just hope to shed some light on it for someone else who may be struggling.",6.157882971729126,5.342729627218934,6.675345167652861,80.64892833662067,66.33727810650889,8.694543063773834,29.428665351742268,7.3871296695380915,1.664466929651545,653,18,132,5,9,214,97,169,0.19699999999999998,0.722,0.08,-0.9698,0,1,1,0,0,0,13.0,1,4,1,1,6,10,0,2,7,0,19,4,0,1,3,39,30,12,0,1,9,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,19,13,0,2,7,0,0,5,5,5,0,1,3,3,9,5,22,23,5,22,0,3,2,2,10,10,0,8,5,102,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5812859810909711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092854407368924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11142581936657092,0.15260026051922154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18480436275020665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849726028421938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587701013271067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17932191779823242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755875947774235,0.0,0.0,0.18059855785176368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11915893306016385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045195710189491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700115392976667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431657391513315,0.12830517296427515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695645173698715,0.14730373479377992,0.0,0.0,0.15947754637039618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344333377088499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858806457566587,0.12987473792461768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104209615148774,0.0,0.1763635471087177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207785051529863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390748202838354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863830283924003
mentalhealth,Niyanii,2020/02/06,"PTSD- the reason and why I feel stupid about it A few weeks ago I got diagnosed with PTSD. I always thought that you could only get PTSD from a life and death situation. My PTSD however was caused by a shit supervisor at my graduation internship in 2018, and I feel really stupid about it.

My boss/supervisor basically made it a sport to try to shit as much on me as possbile. He started out as a very good supervisor I guess. Trying to help me, and teaching me new stuff, but after 2 months, something happened and no matter how hard I tried. Everything I did was garbage. He basically started wearing me down until the end of my internship. When he was nice to me, he made sexual jokes (sometimes involving me). I started having panick attacks in the bathroom every time he wanted to talk to me about something.

At the end of my internship he had to grade my work and my thesis which I was writing while I was doing my internship there. I needed at least a 7,5 to keep my gpa as high as it was to get admitted to the masters degree I wanted to do.

The day that he graded me came, and he started out talking about how I did not do my work well and how he never got the feeling that he got to know me. He told me that he talked to colleagues and was very confused that I was more open and talkative with other employers than with him, and that everyone had a different impression of me. He stated that I might had to go see a psychologist because he thought I had a multiple personality disorder. I don't remember the rest of the conversation very well honestly. Only that he graded me a 6 and I went home early and very upset. 

Eventually everything worked out when I got to talk to my professors/ graduation supervisor from college. They assured me that they were not going to let him grade me, as I told them my experience. Luckily they knew me well so they knew that the description of my internship supervisor could not be accurate. So in the end I did get into the masters of my choice. 

Fast forward a few months and I was still dealing with immens amounts of stress that I had to decide to take a gap year before my masters. I started seeing a psychologist (not for the personality disorder,  my supervisor kindly suggested that I had) beucase I was still dealing with panick attacks at my part time retail job I was taking in my gap year. Every time my boss wanted to talk to me, I suffered from panick attacks. Things eventually got slightly better and my psychologist decided I was doing fine and discontinued my treatment. When I started my masters in 2019, shit went down hill again. I had so much stress that I trembled when the exam weeks came around, and I was suffering from panic attacks again. 

This time I sought out another psychologist as I changed from GP. (Insurance things from the country I live in)After a few session my psychologist has diagnosed me with PTSD and an anxiety disorder. As the waiting times here are very long, I have to wait to the end of this months untill I start my treatment with EMDR.

Right now I feel trapped in a hole I can't get out of. I feel really stupid that a situation like that gave me PTSD. A normal person could just be like, fuck it. I don't agree, you are a dick and move on. But I feel weak for it to have such an impact on me. 

The feeling of stuckness stems from the fact that I feel incapable of doing anything. I get panic attacks when I get the feeling there is too much pressure on me, so persuing my masters degree is proving to be very difficult like this. Also I am afraid to start working in the professional field as everytime I am confronted with an 'authority figure' (basically my boss wanting to talk to be for any reason) I get panic attacks. 

I hope that things will start looking up in a few months with the treatment. I just needed to vent somewhere honestly. I feel very alone and ashamed. My boyfriend and parents are here for me but they don't felly get it.  I also had to delay my masters for another year as it has been proven to be very difficult to study with all the stress and panic attacks. 

Anyhow thanks for reading.",5.101086082059536,6.285739170670045,6.174914147799102,76.40711320537874,68.79772439949431,9.343119181703251,31.701666475117804,9.61981836618189,3.0366058659924144,3248,137,599,71,55,1083,296,791,0.187,0.7340000000000001,0.079,-0.9985,5,2,2,0,0,0,72.0,0,2,6,11,35,51,15,13,45,0,58,10,5,10,5,107,127,52,1,11,9,1,11,3,0,2,4,0,1,3,34,42,0,4,23,3,1,8,10,33,3,0,45,14,112,18,111,71,13,87,0,2,3,2,46,30,5,5,53,434,146,22,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0385567826224494,0.0,0.0,0.045048975498330084,0.0,0.06956783728041993,0.036192346962879256,0.0,0.0,0.029578927289370862,0.09121917728720123,0.033274496153223566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035793690372453967,0.038720865572404665,0.0,0.3463826788846409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02651489749903747,0.0,0.03701208725553807,0.0,0.0,0.03846887989311446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949619696444884,0.0,0.044682608801106985,0.046013242919158065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418459867928186,0.0,0.0,0.028051469370839226,0.0896854044330036,0.0,0.08829551375321525,0.0,0.04544430163548872,0.14955134041341506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540989942218242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329489786881313,0.041562510827720056,0.0781832119975177,0.04254765826291981,0.0,0.0,0.21993000312813366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04021156284896081,0.18179987541850584,0.0,0.04943981865701688,0.0364825732454131,0.17393953905552825,0.0,0.04791600008431651,0.0,0.03846357168236583,0.0,0.038964077680448336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029154605457377712,0.04595615407845087,0.043630264182420636,0.04320156975852539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0431632957336284,0.0386614468925041,0.0,0.045294629154262266,0.02390438995000296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044477841142436456,0.030722672899914493,0.06375018127339778,0.0,0.03840796712098672,0.038492793944684,0.036525877579647564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231436720523977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04614262534832034,0.0,0.0,0.13887310013275853,0.046229607858599794,0.09592419923101876,0.06450380537345123,0.03354697328508475,0.04200892903893863,0.0,0.0,0.042617069325137716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616168438430221,0.0,0.2041338119205593,0.04829741490569942,0.04710217736247197,0.0,0.0,0.11393768838262618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050685845845098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043507999726897464,0.0,0.05572959620191022,0.08944273545827115,0.0,0.0,0.049272748407424335,0.037145541931913814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932172612165645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394476212380838,0.0,0.0977831676996354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669710442809274,0.043018882705962866,0.0,0.2770816930290663,0.0,0.06947228937880337,0.0,0.14947435018493968,0.0,0.04979277585726189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06540750211552078,0.20976372771668247,0.0,0.04004548378777774,0.0,0.0,0.08669088549916304,0.0,0.0,0.06906229454713228,0.1268150046728159,0.0,0.0,0.08312502165544011,0.0,0.088593253030899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871115539442095,0.10262081132035264,0.0,0.06978010255089745,0.0,0.11732500075413488,0.0806428801610061,0.039248581293564885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12666309108452176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403043624551318
mentalhealth,suzetteturnerclark,2020/02/06,"I am a Registered Play Therapist because.....  **The following short piece explains a personal journey into the fascinating world of play therapy.**  
 [https://suzette-turnerclark.squarespace.com/config/pages/5d24f73bd006630001806249](https://suzette-turnerclark.squarespace.com/config/pages/5d24f73bd006630001806249)",37.82579710144928,48.06156991304349,16.687608695652173,-17.75148550724637,45.52173913043478,13.707246376811595,47.31159420289856,9.2995712137729,9.588107246376813,280,10,12,7,6,60,20,23,0.0,0.672,0.32799999999999996,0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,3,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,9,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131297152329195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44851862264530096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5874287585477951,0.5964128437663873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Emma55525,2020/02/06,"Should I go to a psychiatrist while at a University? So, I've got mental health issues. Several. Few diagnosed, few that are just my assumptions. I haven't been in a therapy for a few years now and it's getting pretty bad. I'm thinking of going to a psychiatrist, but there are few people saying that when (and it's mostly likely when not if) I'm put on medication it could mess with my studies. I can't really tell whether it's true cause last time I got prescribed medication I was in middle school and my mother simply didn't buy the meds so I have no idea how true it is. Can anyone confirm? And if it is true, I would really appreciate some thoughts on whether it's better to try to cope (which is hard) or risk my grades and possibly the whole semester.

Just in case it's relevant, I'm Polish, so I guess if there are people from Poland they can share their thoughts on Polish psychiatry specifically.",2.7041176470588217,4.924245777777782,4.469411764705882,81.8779411764706,77.33333333333333,8.013071895424838,23.92156862745098,8.841846274778883,1.8725196078431376,720,24,142,17,17,243,108,180,0.063,0.802,0.135,0.9304,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,1,11,9,0,1,7,0,17,4,0,2,3,31,29,19,0,6,10,1,1,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,11,6,0,0,4,0,1,3,5,3,0,0,7,2,14,6,15,19,7,18,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,7,8,97,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150872310705756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13315507732002366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410427982258634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16382489417030685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273279195251941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16186390616448293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331917649209031,0.0,0.1812667898451868,0.0,0.2550936692586123,0.0,0.17567984174377685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285839779088552,0.0,0.0,0.16951461222651426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180028017219034,0.0,0.16645060909404322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12999352074279774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791149607326661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771409250544912,0.3213088438682443,0.1607134281850784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22111995908823398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17978425431573608,0.0,0.16224354570813956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031655905737133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043277114944481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682102904942666,0.0,0.16139735165275196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801615109425979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938829805797098,0.0,0.18237371646794004,0.0,0.0,0.10218522785642888,0.0,0.2532108889546799,0.09299123429523806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827314915440264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780482942132592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328656108401992,0.0,0.0,0.1026967590178311
mentalhealth,MediocreJedi32,2020/02/06,Need advice on adding cymbalta 30 mg to 25 mg of seroquel and 1 mg of ativan. *ADVICE NEEDED* I'm super sensitive to pills and I'm scared of adding cymbalta.  What are you experiences? It's for my severe anxiety and panic disorder,0.5365000000000002,2.850629177777776,3.91041666666667,77.04562500000003,101.66666666666669,7.583333333333335,21.180555555555557,8.07648339933343,2.4103888888888894,183,7,31,6,8,66,33,45,0.253,0.672,0.075,-0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,5,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5521278918078476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21611815826219935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32377911005232257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27634743137232604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4189528086021255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314627460334925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828401996152567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191540873351762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GunPain,2020/02/06,I'm a perfectionist and it's frustrating I don't do anything because I'm afraid of not doing it 100% perfect :/,2.5456521739130444,4.37885595652174,5.312391304347828,77.45815217391308,76.39130434782608,8.078260869565218,33.23913043478261,8.841846274778883,3.133017391304348,89,5,17,2,2,32,18,23,0.20800000000000002,0.5489999999999999,0.243,0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8035458889664677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5952428112334404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dempsy40,2020/02/06,"Need some advice to help settle my nerves Before Christmas last year I got attacked by a group who were trying to steal my phone. Ever since I’ve found it hard to leave my house apart from work and my local shop. I find myself skipping out on friends hanging out in the town I got attacked in out of fear it’ll happen again, especially in the dark.

Today I thought I’d be daring and go with some friends around another’s house and also decided to walk into town to get a bus but told my friends about how uncomfortable I felt so one of them offered to come with me. I felt fine until we split ways, he decided to leave me a few meters from the bus stop and as I walked over I saw a group of people walking the opposite direction as me and one of them stared at me and it set off my nerves.

I’m scared of always feeling like this and I don’t want to be a burden on my friends by not showing up to get together or having one always with me, so does anyone have any advice to help calm me down if I’m ever like this again, I don’t want to be stuck with a fear like this all my life.",6.3901106719367595,4.462907165217392,6.878458498023715,82.98879446640319,66.47826086956522,9.754940711462453,30.47430830039525,8.00094639256281,1.819130434782609,848,22,191,8,11,279,129,230,0.141,0.703,0.156,0.7003,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,2,1,10,16,2,3,10,0,9,1,0,1,3,40,29,17,0,4,4,0,4,3,4,1,1,0,0,0,7,18,0,1,8,2,1,6,3,7,0,3,10,6,28,9,43,15,4,37,0,0,2,0,16,20,0,4,12,122,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22454475810602556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09188011087417416,0.1912008181793432,0.0,0.0,0.07813136716991026,0.12047561704721728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033604960213017,0.0,0.0,0.10227937394678366,0.0,0.2614153747311101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776571512538812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897038346142893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054387960564448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20785509083230705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25857375424496964,0.05809349222836273,0.08207977894414352,0.22063112422307649,0.0,0.10501037230166628,0.0,0.0,0.1259745462898787,0.3550650384558396,0.0,0.12005398876374652,0.0,0.06529649615950164,0.0,0.18378129616885752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159974404687101,0.0,0.10292180747142864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540210813867346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651428280247761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365335409968456,0.0,0.2433107788618848,0.0,0.0,0.08115251825399536,0.16839315271619235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519190794489326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335639707355726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965253079025285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150282120276777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950409047334221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605592286342717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121242701045318,0.0,0.0,0.1089053910163483,0.10978544834352023,0.0,0.0780049922434849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13553406129480858,0.09119693421699396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836436729059204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739875024711167
mentalhealth,Sharpeddd,2020/02/06,"Bit of a weird one Hey, erm bit of a weird one, I'm quite a nice, easy-going guy, however, for the last 2-4 months I've been experiencing visions and dreams of just horrible things such as brutal murder and torture. This has escalated quite dramatically to the point where every human showing me any sign of love or respect, my first thought is to slit their throat. In real life I'm not really a violent person but I just can't escape this craving for slitting someone's throat, I sound a bit mental. But yeah, I decided to write this since I am fearful this may escalate further to the point where i can't control my self. I would appreciate any responses which could help me learn how to escape or understand wtf is happening to me.",7.9900892857142845,6.6478201319444485,8.493968253968259,70.80500000000002,62.95833333333334,11.839682539682546,36.5436507936508,10.914260884657429,3.86239007936508,585,23,111,13,7,196,97,144,0.168,0.6890000000000001,0.14300000000000002,-0.5826,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,4,6,10,4,1,8,1,10,4,2,2,0,21,16,8,1,2,7,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,4,6,2,0,1,4,2,0,0,3,7,0,3,2,2,12,3,14,11,3,9,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,3,3,66,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126860213856004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5121757529114614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753922273028878,0.1248558225589348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175596314799076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17596973218676806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301580774049848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887372947399873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15483969136902034,0.13828533992072695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481747663014164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274696705969698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11045503782961903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113805768877846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15759314490600654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124820141615372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21193277200582405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654401882631928,0.0,0.0,0.2956572027784605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33265640663115964,0.0,0.17799341759110646,0.10018032410078027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631372918901984,0.0,0.0,0.12935823747126324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324993298062862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389118885681196,0.0,0.0,0.12414737450830685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16279594412957693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108707989389224,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,earnesthemingwhey,2020/02/06,"I've convinced myself I've every disorder in the past year+. Tomorrow I'm planning on calling therapy, how should I prepare? I've been bored, anxious and friendless at college and as a result, my mental health has suffered quite a bit. This has led me to dive deeply into mental disorders and at points I've convinced myself I've had a whole bunch. It's problematic because whenever I self-diagnose I feel like I subconsciously start to act like I have the disorder

Anyway, I've been putting off the free therapy my school offers for over a year. How it works is that there's a 15 minute consultation on the day you call, and I'm curious how I should prepare. I'm planning on mentioning a few things, is that enough?",3.8793645083932873,6.0103241726618695,4.9721043165467655,80.04626199040769,73.46043165467627,8.374340527577939,30.288369304556355,9.075114841892004,2.8273448441247004,576,26,105,13,12,189,85,139,0.135,0.747,0.11699999999999999,-0.3527,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,4,5,7,0,0,10,0,10,1,0,5,0,13,15,8,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,3,1,12,6,13,10,5,19,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,0,8,64,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909176453236352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09124136374120352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634078979603723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30567274393607097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652891626048653,0.0,0.0,0.15191842788315515,0.0,0.0,0.5146264755177836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465576535680148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610884950744214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756809013263073,0.10692887297493278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909904810097467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462486885179649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016772785006077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288309064859478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141492608000979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15046615513457176,0.0,0.1591993095387088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148054009443507,0.0,0.0,0.15614516186204527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594174899689793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3423360889964377,0.0,0.09943837066392956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671083911484833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896622518197152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19277342983222176
mentalhealth,123mkopl,2020/02/06,"Keep having this dream where 911 doesn't show up. I am posting this on this sub because I feel this very much has to do with my crippling anxiety, maybe even depression. Thank you for reading...

I don't know why, but for the past few years, every so often I have this dream and it is the exact same setting and circumstance every single time.

I am in my childhood home with my family, the number of family members in this dream is the only thing that seems to fluctuate from dream to dream. Every time, we hear an intruder coming in from downstairs trying to kill us. We go and hide in our secret hideout on the top floor and I call 911. Every time I call 911, the operator seems she couldn't careless about the fact I am in danger. She seems to be confused about where I am and why I would need police. Once she agrees with me that police need to be involved, she tells me that the police will be there soon and we hang up.

This is where it gets frustrating. The police NEVER show up. Ever. Every single time, they always fail to get there in time. Its almost as if I never called 911 in the first place.

What has been a new ""change"" in this dream i keep having is that the intruder can't find us so he decides to give up and leave the house, then and only then after we have checked the house to make sure it is safe do the police finally decide to show up, but it is always after the danger has passed.

Why do you think I keep having this dream? I also have dreams where I am being chased by someone who is trying to kill me and I can't seem to run fast, almost as if I am in slow motion. When the person chasing me grabs me, I wake up.

I also struggle with thanatophobia so I am sure that has something to do with it too. Why do you think this could be happening?",3.0012380952380937,4.372060266666665,4.010396825396825,89.21,74.1111111111111,6.587301587301588,20.91269841269841,7.021680442328713,0.393186507936508,1376,29,289,13,28,445,163,360,0.113,0.779,0.10800000000000001,-0.8303,0,0,1,0,0,1,37.0,7,3,1,3,19,14,5,2,18,0,43,1,1,1,7,57,65,23,2,7,4,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,24,19,0,4,12,12,1,6,7,10,0,1,1,3,43,4,47,55,5,54,0,2,0,0,26,24,0,10,22,215,67,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680943256334329,0.0,0.0,0.13424299834167105,0.13967860331016616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420881123430215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05116501360600265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571161169867057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879039415862311,0.0723011808348918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701397970901568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229170313869875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05543721044555959,0.07592255371818543,0.3535874923563756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15824985455762014,0.0,0.04243924232717721,0.0,0.0,0.09194492270535973,0.07671359503503401,0.07139369601039247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770346085342312,0.08051655279701121,0.04770127801467836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422201683167537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459902711665448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841920305597289,0.0,0.0,0.19369571871533672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22381155231935512,0.1857197136536512,0.0,0.04612759438649512,0.0,0.0,0.08887333769110528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056026187501837715,0.0,0.08432236854396925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170069686268696,0.12447108572421922,0.12946920459593536,0.08106338807943424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893863177473716,0.0,0.12767024582470146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012391504623767,0.0,0.0732873959698214,0.0876925249882439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038498330857527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395610045550725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056392124247746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111648633691395,0.06461602184142416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774539986846706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15821244766409906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733614796547651,0.07727458584122324,0.0,0.0,0.055761612709007716,0.10756225047369758,0.0,0.0,0.2447111643469659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397052033083245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019230599642312,0.0,0.0,0.0692538343988003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029473066564859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05962386987942975,0.0,0.0,0.054050349292331414
mentalhealth,InnocuousCyanide,2020/02/06,"Medication or not? My psychologist told me I should get meds because I have more than four symptoms, and I have a family history of mental illness, so I am more vulnerable. It will be very difficult trying to cope with it through just therapy. She said that if I don't, I might get worse. She gave me a few days to think about it. 

I am really skeptical about going on medication though because I am somehow functioning, even though everyday tasks take a lot more energy than they normally would. I don't have any suicidal thoughts or hallucinations, so nothing extreme. 

She told me I have severe emotional exhaustion. I don't know what kind of meds that requires but I'm guessing antidepressants. Is anyone on these? What side effects do they have?",4.764130434782608,7.148350992753624,5.8254347826086965,73.77989130434786,71.68115942028986,10.107246376811597,31.78985507246377,10.317481424215053,3.879176811594204,599,28,104,19,12,198,90,138,0.08800000000000001,0.856,0.055,-0.5094,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,2,9,4,1,0,3,0,18,5,0,1,0,20,31,9,1,4,6,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,0,8,2,0,1,4,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,5,1,20,1,12,21,5,6,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,7,2,80,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059731440819148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896345562396703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189991139671412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005006833501227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17529340063246013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292754804935783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14690736941732244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16283471171318173,0.0,0.08856462194635636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716698219339758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622781723807276,0.08564284078254078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248534462779393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461951099167753,0.3139747364590681,0.15704502762001454,0.16531630902357078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268521348861358,0.14952788577707496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983189163952903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482347712364889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17604919378274314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704581973936352,0.0,0.0,0.16197223357164311,0.11716852639576672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17821090411243892,0.0,0.0,0.09985277591483993,0.30621419335112154,0.1237155833791996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978140420890025,0.0,0.10580173599356923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285801956915698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15880917876421993,0.11070071315962512,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,K1mpp4,2020/02/06,"Building a game that's supposed to give depressed people coping tools Hiya! I'm Kim Kupiainen. A game production student in Kajaani University of Applied Sciences.  
We're making a game (project lighthouse) With the premise to give coping tools and mechanisms for people with depression through a game. Here's our first Vlog. If you're interested in finding out more. Please join our discord and spread the word.

I'll be checking out reddit for a hour or so now. So if you have any questions, I'm open to answer them.

We're students, so we're not getting money through this. We're interested in learning more about serious gaming. Video is in finnish. However I added english subtitles to help understand what's up in this video.

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DSKn8iw1yY](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4DSKn8iw1yY)

Discord channel currently is entirely in finnish, but we'll add channels for the english speaking persons, so you can talk there and share experiences and be a part of this community.",7.22237951807229,10.640402608433742,5.658659638554219,72.97184487951813,68.09638554216869,8.005421686746987,36.881024096385545,8.841846274778883,3.8184349397590367,827,44,119,16,16,242,103,166,0.06,0.861,0.079,0.4675,2,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,3,2,1,1,8,6,0,0,9,0,7,0,0,1,0,22,14,12,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,5,10,0,0,5,9,2,0,1,3,0,1,0,1,7,3,23,11,3,14,0,2,0,0,19,10,0,4,4,70,12,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527824864527094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870138119788158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21976919441852144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053432106043067,0.1911031642955432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738017377836635,0.43104556501566177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15059075908160288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22125350935519708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499681668456843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432944137687169,0.0,0.31151411135353874,0.19617212800937767,0.0,0.2466188727705504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516804709567185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18058026904658536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233888141463133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gintoki98,2020/02/06,"Need someone to hear me out (story included), maybe help me Hello everyone, Anon(21M)(RS) here.

I don't know where to turn to, so I'll just write my boring story here.

I'm studying electrical engineering, sort of. Tbh I haven't really studied for a year, but I'm really good at programming/FPGA stuff so I get to pass with 60-70% percent grade. Now stuff(subjects) that demand work has pilled up and I have to do it right, but I have no motivation what so ever to do so. 

What I've done is met a person that is nearby on tinder, a girl, and have been chatting with her every single day, most of the day making her content and happy, appriciated and found my fullfilment there. I do kind of like her, but nothing to extreme, she just seems to be there always and help me use her as distraction? I don't know anymore. We have like 5k of pictures sent in those 4 months, our pets, memes, us. Sometimes she shows interest, sometimes she is cold. She asked me to hang out before, I refused, and now that I'm asking her out she refuses, says the time is not ready. Point is, due to me being so insecure I tend to know everything about a person, and I begin to notice if they chat with someone else. I called her yesterday on that, asked why does she feel need for more people, am I not enough, and what do I even mean to her? She just brushed it off, said I crossed the line and it is not my place to know that and to leave her alone for a while. She said I'm suffocating her. We talked today, same thing, she just said don't talk to me, I asked if she needed time to think, or we are done, and she said it's first one but I doubt it, it's gonna end soon. How can one just end such contact even after many many hours and sleepless nights together online? Why does it happen to me, I know my personality is needy and nosy sometimes, but I think it's due to the fact we just chat and it is my only medium of knowing her? I told her that but she just said it is not worth thinking about, eating her nerves and stuff. I'm not sure what to do, I got so so used to her, yesterday I couldn't sleep and got drunk for the first time in my life in order to stop thinking. It did help, minus throwing up, but now here we are again. I hate myself for being so nosy. I hate myself for trusting someone so much. I hate myself for being so insecure. I hate myself for being impatient. I hate myself for not being able to focus on my problems, and have to have somebody to love, focus my time onto. It is the only thing that kept me and made me do something. Otherwise I would've just done nothing at all, sleep all the time, or be ultra hyped about something for short periods of time. Why am I so weak? I feel depressed all the time, feel dead inside, had some suicidal thoughts, and vomiting seems to help me feel better from time to time, not that I eat so much, nor have body weight problems. I'm quite certain I wouldn't commit suicide tho, since I always see ""hope"" somewhere. 

Before this, only person i got attached to this much was my ex, 4 years older, when i was 16-20. She was just like me in those periods, only I kind of devoted to her, and was her distraction. She is now well off, and focus on herself spending time, and deemed our relationship as waste of her time. I kind of moved on after that, and now this. I need someone to focus on so I don't have to look at myself, and I spent so much energy on the one from tinder, I don't think I could meet someone that is so there, and so accepting and good thinker, but at the same time caring. Why did I have to f*** this up? Why? Would she even really go out with me if I wasn't that nosy? Where have I gone wrong?

Also, aside from constant depression, and lack of motivation for anything other than what I've said, maybe i'm bipolar since I have moments where I can't stop and sit and I have to walk and think and overthink, and plan grand things like learning Japanese in new faculty alongside this one I don't take that seriously, and is considered hardest in my country. What should i do in order to improve? I don't want therapy, nor to include my family in this. 
I don't really have any friends at all I can talk to about this problems, she was my friend and listened to, until I crossed the line by being too much nosy I guess? I can't really bring myself to cry either, just sort of hate and making faces for the shit I am.


I know all of this is too random, not chronical, but had to talk about it since I can't stop thinking about all of this, it's just on repeat in my head, repeat, repeat, repeat, and if I'm already suffocating her, can't talk to her for a day or two for sure now.

Point is I have many problems, that could be deduced from what is written here, I don't even know how to ask for help, because I don't know what I shall do. Those problems are not as serious are some, but I can't help but to ask someone here. If you have any questions, those are also welcome. 

Thank you.",3.2943230548486615,4.277060558300395,4.426654393849155,88.01720315122641,72.86363636363636,7.402912989333477,24.534950457523426,7.712971501820863,1.047026325193568,3823,108,829,47,73,1253,352,1012,0.142,0.7440000000000001,0.114,-0.9840000000000001,0,1,2,0,0,2,149.0,8,2,1,8,67,51,7,5,18,0,96,17,6,10,12,175,185,84,3,23,40,1,5,4,2,5,6,9,1,5,54,49,4,6,32,5,3,11,31,24,1,7,33,18,141,27,124,135,22,111,0,2,2,1,97,40,1,20,61,590,195,5,0.041687665818719945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043175849445992884,0.046003375860436825,0.06667522258778304,0.0693749549809113,0.0,0.0,0.056698084575405615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04134296268220654,0.0,0.0,0.0343053969494788,0.0,0.2338340407156463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025412414152166718,0.0,0.07094626634012136,0.0,0.0,0.03686935270442858,0.0,0.04630559891306215,0.0,0.0,0.04256776776137093,0.0,0.04250335363946912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04504955693543265,0.0,0.06656841800001438,0.0,0.0457919433998825,0.08065528715558458,0.0,0.07181105096825675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296231457236865,0.12798286734293418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531377893946279,0.03482469554709903,0.0,0.07384579672124887,0.04307450260623994,0.0,0.11013724043009768,0.03770888039694178,0.03512365642655522,0.03983435117545815,0.037466186001656125,0.0,0.03929942122664256,0.0,0.08431414564860892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091901449849845,0.0,0.04570837384913058,0.06441557440163362,0.0,0.02178008479532636,0.0,0.02369206117741433,0.06993127246166801,0.10002430378793332,0.0,0.0459236638083217,0.0,0.036864265207863435,0.044377295443023435,0.0,0.2469476362312438,0.04278357202188653,0.0,0.046985029144963206,0.0,0.16765418196003914,0.0,0.0,0.04140525841245368,0.041053953490635176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302338666380327,0.2061940581658961,0.0,0.0,0.04414121887826042,0.0,0.0,0.029445231218507176,0.08146595117476113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035007139980799094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037624745996535036,0.03944587736326378,0.05565368128805158,0.12679425000691008,0.08376172703605364,0.0454100892345948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0332746971329711,0.04430739138394355,0.15322615510532595,0.12364350392834104,0.0,0.04026220742000775,0.0,0.039121050370938715,0.0,0.08000087935125272,0.04746168383860131,0.0,0.0,0.11299456497614375,0.1268213934932137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028900978512059763,0.14560024729870796,0.04355473801318483,0.0,0.07881663768616591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19944733073134807,0.0,0.0,0.046699726387483737,0.04433996403442282,0.0,0.0,0.1335309309858138,0.0,0.0,0.04475695191589338,0.0,0.03560103883165061,0.2379270994381114,0.033151705079433665,0.0,0.0,0.033219672337231505,0.07590177056426317,0.0,0.0,0.042791789895061036,0.10345340386109148,0.0,0.08343554430482772,0.0,0.21193094379967548,0.0641864036446607,0.12369050233670666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455826582367776,0.0,0.0,0.1431672110273119,0.09119908044744772,0.0,0.07858026336176714,0.0,0.031343936601653355,0.1675348334218583,0.0,0.03838040177133735,0.047673478979807546,0.0,0.08308629839518589,0.18698241087726475,0.0,0.033095350102604795,0.2917009581866837,0.0,0.03951503278532497,0.03983435117545815,0.0,0.0,0.04534420949617855,0.04072279205013137,0.0,0.05014512911301005,0.07200951696857448,0.0,0.0,0.024588465390058812,0.0,0.0,0.050764346244641566,0.03748221805842773,0.0,0.18808317149882656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03034911721373174,0.0,0.0,0.059227443440109113,0.04557891833335386,0.0,0.05369098000688709
mentalhealth,DEWmise,2020/02/06,"Weird thought patterns for 2 months Hey everyone, I'm sorry I didn't really know where to ask this and I'll be honest I'm a bit confused and scared and don't quite know how to feel. 

For the past 2 months I've been having periods of extreme determination and periods of emptiness and some reoccurring suicidal thoughts. Some days I went to the gym and had my best workouts and didn't feel tired and thought I was 1 in a million and was the next big fitness advocate and theyl next day or even during the same day look in the mirror and see the most disgusting person in the world and feel ashamed of myself. There's also times where I exude confidence and talk to random people and others where I hide from everyone and avoid speaking. And on Christmas I smiled and showed I was having a good time, but inside I felt completely numb (almost like I was in traffic).  In the beginning these emotions seemed to last for a day or two but now they seem to cycle ever 4-6 hours and range from On top of the world to defeated and suicidal. In June I went on a diet and lost 150 pounds and that became my life and now I don't want to go to the gym and have turned to binge eating again. I feel like I'm losing my sense of self and don't remember what being stable feels like anymore. I do have a doctor's appointment tomorrow and will get a professionals help, but any advice on how to cope or what this might be would be greatly appreciated. Thank you all for listening m",7.019807909604516,5.935118257627122,7.32,77.6102824858757,64.72881355932203,10.71412429378531,32.2090395480226,9.888512548439397,2.8014700564971755,1166,37,236,21,15,381,164,295,0.128,0.7290000000000001,0.14300000000000002,0.7563,1,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,6,12,18,1,4,17,0,23,6,0,2,2,60,52,34,2,2,6,0,6,3,0,3,4,3,0,2,7,25,2,1,14,4,0,3,5,10,0,2,15,11,19,8,32,30,7,43,0,3,2,0,10,18,0,12,25,149,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554528254083946,0.0,0.0,0.10815555283002834,0.0,0.0,0.08637487104035976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344991967575983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071160449565957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097396667889526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334892985198655,0.0,0.11791800785695833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324552938553062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27862784230387844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105519325594468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052031576137676,0.0,0.12149574599950234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133901897639768,0.09770045168050172,0.0,0.20641472572373784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730633350225631,0.15432350383274085,0.10370571346151042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05643031826305801,0.0,0.06138408390568885,0.09059294301736022,0.0,0.11908045926555375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239625048175331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636724710688206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871799842834005,0.08804186570840501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629005050275299,0.1583034316301532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070047564827738,0.12083460111810684,0.11790473636638148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458063006499565,0.0,0.0,0.17242373176833048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297378935950417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103106946579861,0.07487993875484335,0.0943094158201936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148810165684909,0.0,0.0,0.06919342146095621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235330163679566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813599249461207,0.0,0.08606930139164262,0.1966549308655617,0.1126770899882686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209073905182848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362889393365463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868136562275694,0.0,0.09944030555314227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572415796633725,0.12596199741491776,0.1241406188005947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748292980958484,0.10550923642144648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370658978604836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002511116208166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672659483745005,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw_me_away_56,2020/02/06,"should i get checked for OCD? my friend has OCD, and he described the illness very differently than i thought it was. i thought it was a compulsion with cleanliness and organization, but apparently it can be any obsessions/compulsions that rule your life.

i personally have strange fears that effect my behavior to some extent. overall i’m convinced that i will die unnaturally at a young age, currently i’m 19. i’m afraid of highways to the point of me not being able to drive on them. i’m afraid of a specific hallway in my house, and that someone could easily hide in it, and i physically can not walk past it. i can’t sit with my legs hanging off of things (bed, bench, couch, etc.) because i am afraid someone or something might cut my achilles’ tendon. i’m also afraid that i will fly into a rage and kill someone, and that i’ll panic and only make the situations worse, thus completely ruining my life. 

i have a few other small things as well, but i’m not sure if this is just me being an anxious person or what... i honestly thought that these were phobias that most people have to some extent. what do you think?",4.2208578431372565,5.961623662037038,5.098627450980395,81.13852941176471,71.6388888888889,8.415686274509804,29.83551198257081,9.007467420416297,2.494886492374728,885,37,171,18,17,288,134,216,0.21100000000000002,0.7240000000000001,0.065,-0.9888,3,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,1,1,3,15,3,6,9,0,21,5,2,3,1,33,33,14,2,3,9,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,2,2,20,10,0,0,5,0,1,3,4,10,1,0,6,0,22,5,19,19,7,16,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,7,4,114,42,0,0.15070569043820892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205192861949694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024850374163122,0.0,0.0,0.17025453352586828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186879009148596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801204912871306,0.0,0.0,0.12032623078126935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15640871331486525,0.15745537043680602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16807668208874355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16958580041894888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643484259093136,0.0,0.07873750310597707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17389413263237294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673351756420207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21289577210653654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059721861636943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987492173216228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11461846863675887,0.0,0.1768206563742658,0.0,0.0,0.1438656342275904,0.10448035013377842,0.2631807918023595,0.0,0.0,0.14246558984813554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.169399510373451,0.0,0.0,0.3830773273495319,0.11602060331320305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14203832970942584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20024432838323605,0.09656612120373458,0.0,0.3589304526568805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434797778823416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550251472977062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15358197370386842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fickle-Pension,2020/02/06,"Need help, who should I visit? I'm new to all this and don't know much about mental health, never been to a mental health professional before. 

I suffer from short term mood swings. I would feel alright for 2 days, feel down for the next day or two, and so on, with no apparent reason. Its been two years I would say. There is literally no reason as to why i would have mood swings, my life has improved recently, and my mood swings are not triggered by events, thoughts or bad days if you get what i mean. They just come and go arbitrarily, and that pushes me to wonder whether i should visit a psychologist or a psychiatrist? I think I need medication, not treatment by a psychologist. Thoughts? Thanks!",4.707537313432837,6.256545276119404,5.046447761194031,82.74892537313436,70.11940298507463,8.046567164179105,25.34029850746269,8.548686976883017,1.5294352238805966,553,16,110,9,10,175,90,134,0.096,0.8240000000000001,0.08,-0.4695,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,1,0,5,7,0,0,5,1,12,4,0,3,2,35,27,12,0,8,8,0,2,0,0,5,4,1,0,0,5,7,0,0,10,0,0,5,6,2,0,2,4,3,14,2,14,18,3,18,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,5,10,72,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400678157085375,0.0,0.0,0.12637834300919334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127935575910208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873465249541705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150190877814822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759480996046349,0.0,0.08440651181613514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315736536894042,0.0,0.0,0.0995488501729627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162190831523453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490304064988076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16178023536447272,0.0,0.14961680928843252,0.2993435231395887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917821944312693,0.2202492387041618,0.11454665789237052,0.14344013637700126,0.15795115766602458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054036002720865,0.1466441459181876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810790819583865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367359222720846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516468681179276,0.0,0.2358142703225545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29016207603263994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13401488640984902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610620268308999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165099397936367,0.0,0.0,0.09564107370048973
mentalhealth,PostSsn17Pinkachu,2020/02/06,"God damnit I just typed a really long story and deleted my whole post now. Holy fucking shit I just typed the longest thing ever seeking genuine help and I accidentally closed Reddit FUCK. I'm freaking out it took me over an hour to write everything and I'm so pissed off now.

OKAY...I will TL;DR my whole story and hopefully you guys can give me some advice I really need it my mind has been going crazy lately I really appreciate any help. 

TL;DR *cough*
Idek where to begin uh. I'm a gamer. I used to play games for fun. Had traumatic experience. Now I care less about having fun and more about being perfect. I don't have a good time playing games anymore. I push myself way too hard over hours and hours of practice just to get that one moment of victory. When I do well in a game my friends congratulate me, meanwhile I am sitting there beating myself up thinking of how to do better. EVEN WORSE, when my friends do well, I get annoyed and dont congratulate them even though I want to, I'm just a bitch. When I try to congratulate them, it feels inauthentic like I'm doing it just to do it. How do be better friend??? I let people get under my skin when I get hatemail rather than blocking them instantly.

Pls help",1.6957142857142848,4.266750666666667,3.1911904761904784,87.45000000000003,84.0,5.928571428571429,21.48809523809524,7.310402129719878,0.8676845238095234,960,31,189,15,28,314,144,240,0.166,0.595,0.23800000000000002,0.9399,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,3,4,28,23,6,0,7,0,19,6,3,3,2,29,41,15,0,4,6,0,3,1,3,1,1,0,0,1,7,9,0,1,2,5,0,3,2,7,3,1,3,3,31,16,22,34,5,31,0,0,0,2,16,9,5,2,17,124,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117198218886982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155930379986531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894240444402016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21214393824014746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228081276305705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405618772930697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15843068984051098,0.1084872639094778,0.0,0.0,0.10778903976085412,0.117318567786105,0.0,0.0,0.060642286869809936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779823749642823,0.22175429410141592,0.2506424780888489,0.11505172158452433,0.06816131549008,0.10059503664937583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875361950325446,0.0,0.0,0.10743740020494942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411679065032844,0.0,0.0,0.11912162730231282,0.35433280224574165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529089387799575,0.0,0.0,0.12264074767179567,0.0,0.05859374537045201,0.0,0.0,0.10613790840779584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109925621090915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892961883359413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127045315231447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314720697287678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148637192964642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304985753612209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311063480635485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967888983864907,0.07684893145949545,0.11783464876747465,0.0,0.06993454083920242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13325120308700908,0.08142738429825723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358455871839313,0.0,0.0,0.07074024224057075,0.09519810970727044,0.0,0.0,0.21567032696876506,0.0,0.0,0.2678042892403061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222309877893454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mdvader,2020/02/06,"Depression or Anxiety? (Please Read) (Reposted from other subreddits)

I was scared about posting here because I feared it would confirm what Ive been dreading, but at this point any sort of answer is better than nothing. Of course I know I shoudn't self diagnose, nor should I expect that from any one here, but any opinions I can get are better than nothing

For about 5 months, I've been experiencing on again off again bouts of not being able to do things I enjoy (watching vids, playing video games, ect). Its not like I don't want to do these things, nor do I not have the motivation to do them, but some part of my brain tells me that they wont make me happy. This is accompanied by a feeling of unease dread and tension in my chest, muscle aches in the left and right side of my abdomen, and being unable to focus on almost anything with my mind racing everywhere. Its negatively impacted my sleep aswell, as its lucky if I get 4-5 hours of rest a night.

What confuses me is weather this all sounds like depression or just anxiety, as ive never had suicidal thoughts or feelings of self harm, nor have I even had any form of sadness. Any advice over this would be greatly appreciated. Thank you",7.587202898550728,6.916288343478263,7.481521739130436,75.56170289855073,63.39130434782609,10.449275362318842,34.38405797101449,9.725611199111238,3.1045362318840586,949,35,179,16,12,304,148,230,0.198,0.675,0.127,-0.9446,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,2,3,8,21,0,7,4,0,26,5,4,2,2,36,35,15,1,6,11,0,2,2,0,4,1,1,0,2,16,4,0,0,6,4,0,0,10,11,0,1,6,5,24,10,31,22,5,18,0,3,1,0,7,11,0,10,8,129,40,2,0.12557134930258604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227068692303048,0.0,0.0,0.125741567582714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4269641177540292,0.0,0.19212347702516186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333452110366073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654712902373033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22211530802135024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14017915476027226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21630883830563355,0.12745227628598746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293869192275734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413026788785903,0.12698529440854747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121169448857614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384428559119069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336730363223552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366248464095385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901072960221187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13643363843406908,0.0,0.0,0.12269563683078223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381985073698366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679126642776795,0.0,0.1002298529927712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684836581028594,0.0,0.0,0.11784020488398865,0.0,0.2409781926677003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509039609949542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598153445604147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783963316576056,0.11870551333795938,0.0,0.12026264150489792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560533069306198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723724619421253,0.0,0.0,0.12571882675089052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619966068325576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256620354292917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13735467508231847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097548940717227,0.11560922739497675,0.0,0.0,0.16684804954715893,0.0,0.0,0.09968962489042454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740652352601408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17840456745307567,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Andreamm071,2020/02/06,"How to start therapy? I need to try therapy but every time I call someplace they have no appointments, won’t take new patients. It’s way too expensive, I have to wait a few months. I need something/someone now. Can someone please advise where can I go or what can I do?",1.4738888888888866,3.886693796296296,2.9977777777777814,89.60000000000002,83.25925925925927,6.562962962962962,25.66666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.6209111111111107,211,9,43,4,6,69,41,54,0.057999999999999996,0.873,0.069,0.1306,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,1,0,6,13,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,3,12,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,5,28,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24305492237675685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005502763076838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527775575884127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899930241609624,0.0,0.0,0.3529919917126199,0.0,0.2298905536706889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612851158854769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4033635604543618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684786366447132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17896870045908858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5444153800980939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879702389442886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16160653188661073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18893688510982093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Silheibibi,2020/02/06,"Maldaptive day dreaming Please help me recover from this. I'm tired of slacking off while going into this unending loops of daydreaming. My friends are doing great in their studies and I'm slacking off a lot in everything.  Please help!?! It's just like living will a devil I can't run away from. I'm so tired and depressed. Please tell me how to lead a normal life like others ,like how to be practical and be in reality. Please",3.1082228915662635,5.504388180722895,4.094804216867471,84.1838930722892,76.83132530120481,7.523493975903612,26.037650602409638,8.472884824447931,2.001627710843373,341,13,64,7,8,110,56,83,0.134,0.575,0.29100000000000004,0.9204,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,4,7,0,0,3,0,6,3,0,3,0,10,10,7,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,1,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,5,13,7,1,12,1,1,0,0,5,7,0,1,5,40,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540066103429823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571372340527513,0.0,0.14118256559281456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473191713913114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664284863589478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315853022922199,0.0,0.0,0.18072047114433906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21974192200534592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115780321603707,0.2402465603879523,0.0,0.1447428353613342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935745121695292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16060510126661712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.719732146061187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432717928013563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3767998755826589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chocolatefudge420,2020/02/06,"Ending a friendship Hey guys, I hope you can help me with my problem.
So I have this friend, and in the beginning of our friendship I really felt like she and I were soulmates. We had a really loving and strong connection. It’s been almost 5 years, and for the last year I’ve beginning to lose those feelings for her. I am personally very shy to conflict, and I don’t really speak my mind when someone hurts my feelings with either their words or actions. I think that’s one of the reasons why I feel this distance towards her now, because she’s been hurting me multiple times. I feel no connection towards her anymore, I don’t feel like telling her anything, and lately I’ve just gotten sad, after spending a couple of hours with her. I finally told her, that I needed some space, and we haven’t spoken for 3-4 weeks. I’m not sure that our relationship can be fixed, because I’ve just lost feelings. I know she still cares deeply about me, and she doesn’t want things to end. But I’m just not sure that I want to give it another chance. I think about our time together and how we used to have so much fun together, but I still feel like I need to move on and gain new friends. I’ve had some really rough years with depression, and right now I’m trying to change my life, heal and getting treatment. I feel guilt because of her, and how I know she still cares about me, but my feelings just aren’t mutual. 

So have you guys been through the same? And how did you handle it? What did you say to your friend and how did you end it? Am I too drastic or should I listen to my feelings? I’m really confused and I don’t want to hurt her, but I also don’t want to hurt myself by continuing something that holds me down and makes me sad. Is there hope or should I move on with my life?",4.907438016528925,4.985951190082645,5.375578512396697,85.91064049586778,68.77961432506888,8.69366391184573,28.62121212121212,8.438071523408619,1.7572435261707988,1394,44,301,19,22,447,168,363,0.11599999999999999,0.7340000000000001,0.15,0.9001,1,0,1,0,0,2,39.0,6,6,1,4,23,27,0,2,7,0,27,4,0,7,2,83,67,33,0,11,14,0,12,3,3,2,3,3,0,3,14,25,0,2,16,0,1,3,10,12,0,1,13,15,64,15,35,51,5,35,0,9,0,1,42,8,0,9,27,200,78,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162228538694546,0.0,0.0,0.06518495065525161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854722211114706,0.0,0.0,0.0808377948445076,0.0,0.0,0.06707725960468963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14906649561091934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662134089480586,0.0,0.08622866791397596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019124752739714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020598705470656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165857613314225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4121481121722801,0.1164640810587408,0.07826410312667788,0.08929218392896025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889274250238296,0.0,0.04258654707245579,0.07819353837204833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161418978795992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05463563601817991,0.0,0.0,0.1619192030700937,0.08027269587189627,0.0,0.349040237038162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895934983894287,0.06644298975702141,0.0919488518393518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514837863398783,0.11946763283208665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911908453981988,0.08897974989128289,0.0,0.07356757476051977,0.0,0.05440975414470478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230367357343345,0.0,0.0,0.17326827021673766,0.0599205460258319,0.1208799219500184,0.0,0.07872459669675247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05523449983675906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117295276414827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799577658658917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610927060888421,0.08380769800010858,0.0,0.08751315972814021,0.0,0.06961062504025466,0.0,0.06482144868418625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906467689060268,0.062751759828124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952862672794012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536477987147214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07124489903184297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05415281270227138,0.10445893009109487,0.0,0.0,0.09506036289294983,0.0,0.0,0.07788801041759044,0.0,0.05534115622931926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040001709968202,0.0,0.0672557650490358,0.19231106740188408,0.0,0.06538384286928044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355171397946368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747276483883751
mentalhealth,11771177117711,2020/02/06,"Can this happen on Olanzapine? Hey guys, I hope this is allowed. I made a post a few days ago on BipolarReddit asking if I was maybe having a manic episode as I hadn't slept in 4 days, was bouncing off the walls, couldn't sleep no matter what I did, stopped eating, couldn't grasp onto a single thought, hypersexuality, among other things. Everyone said either way I should go to the ER. Well after a few hours of hypervigilance and paranoia I called my mum to take me. They took me to the psych ward as an involuntary patient for 3 days but after I cooperted with the doctor they switched me to voluntary so long as I stayed at least one night. I saw 3 different psychiatrists and all 3 had different opinions of what was going on and put through a referral for me to get DBT and start on seroquil with my diagnosis not yet determined. 1 thought mania, 1 thought schizoaffective disorder, and 1 thought complex-PTSD. So diagnosis not yet confirmed until I have ongoing DBT. Well during all of this, the nursing staff would give me diazepam to sleep, I took one at 12pm at the hospital and then the second one at 2am that night in the ward. So 2 total. The next morning before I saw the psych for permision to leave I was given Olanzapine about 11pm on 6th Feb. As soon as that kicked in I was met with the worst fatigue of my life, all my muscles and joints hurt and I am basically falling asleep anywhere, anytime, uncontrollably. I am so exhausted. I have been home sleeping. But now I just woke up, it's 2:20am on 7th Feb and I woke up because something compelled me to wake up, I turned and there was someone in my room - clear as day standing there and she was there for a very long time. Minutes upon minutes. I could do an accurate detailed drawing of her, she was there for that long. I told myself this has to be the medication, I rubbed my eyes and blinked but she didn't go away for a while until I picked up my phone to see the time, I looked at her again and she very slowly faded. I wasn't scared. I'm only now just spooking myself out as I can't seem to find anything about it being a side effect of any of the medication I was given. And I also don't know if it's even still in my system? Has anyone had this reaction?",4.35009547229857,5.345680484304936,5.366259221756113,82.21415955446263,70.39013452914799,8.266049472009259,28.96108780558368,8.558390810932622,2.0254328945465074,1760,65,356,28,31,580,231,446,0.081,0.882,0.037000000000000005,-0.9591,3,0,1,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,2,1,23,9,0,2,25,0,35,14,7,5,5,55,68,35,0,8,10,1,1,0,0,2,6,1,2,1,15,18,1,1,9,0,0,7,10,6,3,4,33,7,54,3,67,28,10,71,0,2,5,0,18,29,0,5,30,255,69,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621479003257089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777848767727966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613988077306507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800619181421698,0.0,0.08003638504202384,0.0,0.09092462111336533,0.0,0.09137862010533923,0.0,0.0,0.05928856520522181,0.0,0.08276077811392588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931295230152687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765389717737238,0.0,0.0,0.2508976504179446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20323121677685155,0.11146795743727284,0.0995493483313752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952087816743203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423906561634453,0.0,0.0,0.0929357404980152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889353604760887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05081414027926455,0.0933002955372074,0.16582466020964035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963023207577718,0.0860063659608133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755933482278796,0.0966007538097876,0.09578114003207117,0.0,0.1041184410759399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05345134682467651,0.0,0.0,0.10298390062553636,0.0,0.0,0.06869735006787807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582151249655117,0.08167359027646617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202940964700304,0.0,0.0,0.09771036677866426,0.0,0.0,0.19595768168495087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343671550975037,0.1825431406812176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19771691878551545,0.07397032816831378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314783654923137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369129794461162,0.09777278729829524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251617644207584,0.0,0.09737385258477094,0.0,0.0775033295801267,0.08854151058504242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919895968558449,0.0,0.08240776538868591,0.07487521167780681,0.0,0.0,0.06884086379039225,0.10366582038305452,0.07767166286312717,0.08131340223341832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312713455195352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461497374953241,0.0,0.0,0.30885311577225805,0.11342573998361025,0.0,0.0,0.0929357404980152,0.21611804599677853,0.0,0.1057905441527759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16049875440600672,0.0,0.07720016396057604,0.0,0.0,0.17489616815519748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06909044771014203,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,twdgomez,2020/02/06,"I’m failing all my classes in college, can’t get enough motivation to clean my room, & I haven’t been to class in 3 weeks. I want a new life. I want to change but I can’t. I always tell myself that tomorrow will be different but it never is, and I’m lying to my family that I’m going to class when I’m not. I want to start therapy and counseling but I can’t just get on the phone to make an appointment. Someone just give me a new life. Someone tell me what to do, protect me from my family judging me. Please, I’m dying.",0.5260287081339712,2.284805000000002,3.35708133971292,89.45275119617224,82.33333333333333,6.952472089314195,21.767145135566192,8.00094639256281,1.0270982456140354,406,13,93,8,11,144,65,114,0.063,0.8079999999999999,0.128,0.4404,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,4,0,9,2,0,2,2,15,23,6,1,3,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,1,0,16,0,12,20,2,12,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,7,57,20,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803339486403494,0.1927628360320276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18820267624569104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846400254878401,0.18587560113817572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18382613306591467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3354309486455076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858987811129162,0.17066520384405034,0.10110900247456936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513228320526587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875472034566605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721332711298448,0.3436485833104259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952891462490589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014811045863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592393179400485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109982095519219,0.0,0.20345287259074826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148035777916194,0.0,0.14270676457048526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uuula,2020/02/06,"Internal monologue help My internal monologue just never stops and it’s never positive. I have basically been mentally bullying myself for nearly two years and I’m just completely exhausted. I can’t carry on with it so I need to change it . I’ve tried my hardest this past year to just ignore it I’ve started the gym, thrown myself back into uni work but it’s just burying it. I’m miserable as soon as I’m alone. Bad decisions and bad actions may be the root of some of this but I want to move on and I can’t. I feel like I’m missing out on life always being so stuck inside my head. Any advice on how to get out of this mindset and move into a more positive and kind one",0.6192899159663838,2.991887592857143,3.1303361344537852,87.28760504201685,87.35714285714286,6.436974789915968,21.806722689075627,7.724431198458867,1.259941176470588,533,19,108,11,17,184,84,140,0.223,0.6940000000000001,0.083,-0.9709,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,9,8,0,1,3,0,7,3,1,2,2,29,18,13,0,2,6,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,11,0,2,2,1,0,3,4,6,0,2,2,1,11,2,20,13,2,21,0,2,0,0,1,9,0,2,10,73,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842448088901304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952766237513449,0.0,0.0,0.1568852397278222,0.0,0.0,0.1282176340607119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498010972156158,0.31485579515854883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19945649430888251,0.0,0.1976867219169679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533443990102876,0.13469718298360106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850741742022784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19350242331438114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263782995626681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19634147408394328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317550000076328,0.09211397170076817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19000985633560896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40078877000479857,0.0,0.13980434841307698,0.29083634456596025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277635381464462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17998833496419653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345371323218946,0.0,0.0,0.15763276150388422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801024623866572,0.0,0.18418188508890587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120921918637804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726361425140154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428346734616228
mentalhealth,dedzed95,2020/02/06,I need a friend today. My MDD has been quite the feisty demon lately. I feel like there isnt anyone I can really open up to anymore. Is there anyone out there who would like to talk?,0.9205263157894772,3.0568202631578965,2.399210526315791,94.78197368421051,83.21052631578947,4.852631578947369,12.13157894736842,5.985473137389443,-1.1037052631578943,142,1,31,1,4,46,30,38,0.0,0.785,0.215,0.802,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,4,3,4,6,0,5,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3036074945673132,0.42811882844309695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154793009838981,0.21870566809338945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365221296006857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3453379769819813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991279739533197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269980911610121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3256163689374329,0.0,0.0,0.196120397638034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460628253419976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901838504878396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174722679008433,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tofflis333,2020/02/06,"It feels like I don't exist I have a feeling of surrealness. Kind of like I don't really exist. I feel very disconnected to the world, airy. What is this? I've had this feeling before but never to this extent. And it keeps getting worse. 

I'm 18 and got diagnosed with severe ADHD and EIPS (emotional instability) last month. One of my main difficulties is very bad internal restlessness, but now I can't really feel it. I can't really feel anything. I'm just walking around, talking is hard, listening is hard. Help? What is happening?",2.3526470588235284,5.102427500000001,4.6151960784313735,77.1133823529412,82.82352941176471,8.498039215686276,24.18627450980393,9.075114841892004,2.61041568627451,423,16,76,13,12,146,64,102,0.23,0.7040000000000001,0.065,-0.9501,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,2,0,11,1,0,0,1,16,24,5,0,0,3,0,8,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,8,5,0,1,6,0,0,1,5,2,0,1,2,9,7,3,7,22,2,7,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,45,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995786704924985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366579012192118,0.14783365915765664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865790246981302,0.0,0.0,0.1413096585306747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16855316497167314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868015331022033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5038067714709051,0.11863735175459485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676246133776301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281789108092995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685132839926426,0.0,0.29752445323996063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131032176960368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760680263618778,0.0,0.1729318461526278,0.0,0.13536569001828033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16226260149044544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255203782056346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280800865653335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253039952837704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191577722288267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18760694459328975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334772995063056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740431481744991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16923511071622602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Trainer_Red99,2020/02/06,"Constantly thinking about killing someone If I'm constantly thinking about killing someone that scammed me, does it mean I would actually do it if I had a chance? Thoughts are becoming more vivid in my mind. I've never experienced this and don't believe I had a previous mental problem",8.431666666666665,8.951567038461539,7.962307692307696,68.84935897435899,61.30769230769231,11.548717948717947,48.10256410256411,11.20814326018867,5.856979487179487,234,16,38,6,3,74,38,52,0.215,0.748,0.037000000000000005,-0.8885,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,1,11,11,3,2,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,2,5,0,3,7,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,3,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.19855404804253013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22471287057885486,0.0,0.2292371792549611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43975021656109214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17805498997461727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4502112864935126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22163477216426705,0.0,0.0,0.205046473694466,0.0,0.205443260935504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15692598275035605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19469005434914327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3447931743460438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607463591840876,0.0,0.1615297503995957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14453683260679598,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cocapaolabear,2020/02/06,"Which of my meds is causing hair loss? So much hair loss.  I take a Hair, Skin + Nails vitamin religiously to avoid this (and never thought this would happen to me).  Here’s my list: 
- Lithium 900 mg 
- Gabapentin 600 mg 
- Rexulti 1 mg 
- Topamax 25 mg 

Help!",3.0543877551020406,4.703327040816331,3.877295918367349,89.08288265306123,74.51020408163265,7.348979591836735,28.5765306122449,8.07648339933343,1.7393224489795918,191,8,41,3,4,61,40,49,0.139,0.765,0.096,-0.2942,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,1,0,2,5,4,1,1,6,5,2,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,4,0,3,3,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,18,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40747542938519016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3507619811708883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26587045152579536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4405958866253385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915881243197953,0.0,0.3059259007181057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982362794456428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3149009075340966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28177335535644943,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saarahpops,2020/02/06,"Canadians with an interest in youth mental health Hi! Not sure if this is allowed so please delete if not, but I am looking for Canadians that have an interest in youth mental health that would be willing to brainstorm with me about the current state of mental health education in Canada. 

Not looking for money, not even necessarily looking for someone with a relevant degree, just looking for people who are passionate and have ideas about how we can move forward as a country because something needs to change. 

I struggled with mental health issues through high school and it has put me so far behind where I wanted to be at this age. I just want to try and help the future generations. 

This isn’t going to be a huge commitment, unless we can come up with an actually feasible plan, but it’d be nice to have someone to talk to about this sort of thing. 

Thanks to anyone who took the time to read this and I hope to hear from you!",7.244576271186439,7.276123655367236,7.046333333333332,76.06950000000002,63.85875706214689,9.79186440677966,33.519209039548024,9.3871,2.9539880225988706,745,28,135,12,10,236,106,177,0.024,0.794,0.183,0.9847,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,2,1,0,1,10,8,0,1,9,0,17,5,0,2,2,34,30,13,0,7,11,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,12,12,0,0,1,1,1,6,5,1,0,0,1,5,10,7,35,22,0,22,0,0,4,1,9,10,0,4,7,101,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.11348544294312868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131494897153738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07089128983179467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230228455531922,0.10017634325706486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681059920017874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609213770811646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4944571746156616,0.13107095213096526,0.0,0.07794891854609715,0.12287021054666873,0.0,0.11550544380008625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128093144388522,0.0,0.121379945959643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3906281853744212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4687850007703431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360132750402605,0.0,0.08622997622655347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062310144375683,0.0,0.0,0.1276550735434231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690684330163882,0.0,0.0,0.1163247272124321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769498428553132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19706979787209766,0.08952823050946224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157496177724945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960501807662427,0.0,0.0,0.09347211454931967,0.0,0.1070672061906648,0.0,0.0,0.07726007225333344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781153313232564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920608707266693,0.07895548754535665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13718555160073928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826113928760879,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kfabastillas,2020/02/06,Anyone diagnosed with Social Anxiety Disorder? Just wanna know I'm not alone.,5.0076923076923086,8.594265538461544,6.91423076923077,57.06826923076926,85.92307692307692,11.830769230769231,29.57692307692308,10.125756701596842,5.909492307692307,64,3,7,3,2,22,13,13,0.29100000000000004,0.594,0.115,-0.3939,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4288815153028228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167844811845162,0.0,0.0,0.2895475390545622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4203016085718079,0.0,0.0,0.4745931495116266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22757789429699404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4221216213789461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OperaDuck,2020/02/06,"Paranoia? Within these last few months, I’ve become extremely panicky. If a stranger is walking behind me, I’ll start to panic and think they’re trying to kill me, so I’ll start to walk really quickly. When I’m walking on a pavement next to a road and a car comes up behind me, I’ll start panicking and try to edge into somebody driveway until the car passes. It’s not just with this too. I’ve also been getting a bad fear of standing up in front of people in school. I start to feel the strong urge to cry whenever I have to and have to push it back. I usually either beg the teacher not to, or I try and explain to the teacher making me that I need to go bathroom. Then if they let me I’ll go and cry it out, or wait until I’m less anxious and come back in. Is this normal? I’ve never had a bad childhood experience, never been beaten, nobody has ever tried to kill me, so I don’t know why I feel this way. Any suggestions?",3.509076923076922,3.9972359076923136,5.1461538461538465,84.88384615384619,71.97435897435899,7.435897435897437,26.794871794871803,7.321109707123232,1.3084871794871795,722,23,152,7,13,246,111,195,0.195,0.777,0.027999999999999997,-0.9866,0,0,0,0,0,2,21.0,0,0,1,2,11,8,3,2,10,0,10,0,0,1,3,32,29,18,2,4,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,8,12,0,1,5,0,0,12,5,7,0,0,3,2,14,1,29,25,3,43,0,0,0,0,3,10,0,4,19,100,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10598147921134823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012263684369973,0.0,0.0,0.14971734296799022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20380955979595128,0.22130836131145695,0.0,0.1463652246183486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283198733123181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911485081938741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987790272796105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963645086469666,0.0,0.1491292767247645,0.13401886829123144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923968197986136,0.0,0.15063584892227752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2932421089348111,0.0,0.07283315697552206,0.10802687225945264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13551743393723406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884625388194112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057814728048032,0.0,0.0,0.0982667993642422,0.2044253776345311,0.0,0.14094354932654515,0.0,0.12984793615258425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554914180901315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187726218179028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489993756054172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13412400087618814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37521205631895815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849176981542836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35990746572588234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14595933366806552,0.0,0.0,0.10519345150870678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958464902888673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,38hunnid_,2020/02/06,"Actors 
I feel like I can sense who is an actor and who isn’t. I feel like people hired them to watch my reactions, they enjoy seeing me struggle. I wish I knew why. I know it might be delusions but it feels so right, and I don’t know what to believe anymore.

Am I delusional, I don’t know what is happening anymore. Thank you for reading, I’m sorry for wasting your time.",1.0602922077922088,3.1937245584415628,2.875438311688317,91.59030032467535,82.63636363636363,5.4084415584415595,22.61201298701299,6.6274283507984215,0.5820922077922077,289,10,61,3,8,96,52,77,0.091,0.763,0.146,0.4678,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,2,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,9,0,0,0,0,12,21,4,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,7,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,5,15,4,4,18,0,2,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,1,3,39,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4079264482666813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317126726564717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119693873669769,0.2938525168104764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18186781738161265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33908233447070696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20095388647418974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181767889278951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258138206590412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205719453573219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17563575978856702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388741964714132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23022378394992996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150044560975148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18934759342208665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199242145349588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855795887634112,0.0,0.23650321791501724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,playmaneya,2020/02/06,"Actors I feel like I can sense who is an actor and who isn’t. I feel like people hired them to watch my reactions, they enjoy seeing me struggle. I wish I knew why. I know it might be delusions but it feels so right, and I don’t know what to believe anymore.

Am I delusional, I don’t know what is happening anymore. Thank you for reading, I’m sorry for wasting your time.",1.0602922077922088,3.1937245584415628,2.875438311688317,91.59030032467535,82.63636363636363,5.4084415584415595,22.61201298701299,6.6274283507984215,0.5820922077922077,289,10,61,3,8,96,52,77,0.091,0.763,0.146,0.4678,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,2,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,9,0,0,0,0,12,21,4,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,7,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,5,15,4,4,18,0,2,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,1,3,39,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4079264482666813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317126726564717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119693873669769,0.2938525168104764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18186781738161265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33908233447070696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20095388647418974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181767889278951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258138206590412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205719453573219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17563575978856702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388741964714132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23022378394992996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150044560975148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18934759342208665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199242145349588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855795887634112,0.0,0.23650321791501724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,usernamebillion,2020/02/06,"Help. How do you forget someone who completely destroyed you, 7 years later and still feeling the sting from it... Like it was yesterday.",3.765000000000001,6.9601155000000015,3.7550000000000026,82.39000000000001,81.5,6.533333333333335,28.83333333333333,7.793537801064563,2.4609333333333336,108,5,17,2,3,33,22,24,0.179,0.598,0.223,0.079,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,1,1,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5369207332373608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589300731888962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34324576081027336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501832229670701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43389551750697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4089588668575942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3297716955042456
mentalhealth,IHAVETHEHIGHGROUND_3,2020/02/06,"Everything is my dad's fault That fucking pussy just had to have killed himself after having me, literally fucking me for life. No guidance, no help and I was just supposed to pick up the pieces. Wish I could of killed him myself.",3.659318181818183,5.9642781136363645,3.986363636363638,86.07454545454546,74.68181818181819,6.218181818181819,26.90909090909091,7.1686216300943375,1.3803363636363644,183,7,34,2,4,57,37,44,0.29,0.613,0.09699999999999999,-0.8934,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,4,0,1,0,6,3,0,1,0,6,9,1,2,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,8,0,6,6,1,2,0,0,0,2,4,1,2,0,1,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301912656372856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591135266072063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5330740241530302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19324743621796173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6379423536008375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203641163326706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33154110575180623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alps34,2020/02/06,"5 Ways to Boost Your Mental Wellness Just like your physical health, your mental well-being needs a recharge from time to time. Taking care of your psychological wellness is an integral part of maintaining your overall health, so when you find your mindset and outlook is starting to feel down, it’s time to boost your mental wellness and get you back on track.

Taking care of your [mental health](https://youtu.be/Kg37U07grDU) is not unlike looking after your body. You need to give your mind good things, healthy input, for it to remain strong and vibrant. Good things going in will result in positive thoughts coming out.",9.804143302180684,10.400698588785053,7.465934579439256,73.29865264797509,58.43925233644861,9.750155763239873,35.59034267912773,9.2995712137729,3.3225277258566983,507,19,77,7,6,146,70,107,0.0,0.6779999999999999,0.322,0.9904,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,13,0,1,7,9,0,0,2,0,4,3,1,1,0,14,18,5,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,3,0,1,2,13,9,17,16,1,15,0,0,1,0,14,5,0,0,8,52,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948780292876334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13705664736005171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25160530424501376,0.0,0.0,0.10628814295444644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062388860088610686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277472181613794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446532322947697,0.1183653541348246,0.07012444607664219,0.206984597417978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39346815688963616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602813180484575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361514270532224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4973857655087101,0.0,0.12458706527339952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829818047282349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361756520433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733491329882763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18554537535532487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16394748175745638,0.0,0.0,0.09795657187776127,0.21584622755793698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979399335644764,0.0,0.0,0.4437638007750605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whattthefuckisupkyle,2020/02/06,"Winter Driving Anxiety I don't know if this is the best subreddit for this but about a year ago I got into an accident(I wasn't driving). It wasn't so bad where anyone died or even got seriously injured (minor injuries) but it was so bad that the car flipped and we rolled into a ditch. It was scary, we were trapped in a car that landed on its side surrounded by broken glass. That was near the end of winter last year and I didn't have to deal with bad winter driving again until this year. It's been a mild winter and today was one of the first really bad days for roads, because it wasn't expected the snowplows haven't gone out yet. Since the accident driving at all/being in a car makes me a little anxious. I grip the door, close my eyes, try to deep breathe. But I still get into the car and I just deal with it. It hasn't gotten better but it's not interfering with my life (I still get into the car). But today I got into the car (my dad was driving) and about 3 minutes into the car ride I just start crying, my heart is racing and I can't stop. When I got out of the car, I threw up. I was shaking as if I had just gone through some sort of trauma when I just got in the car to come to school. It's becoming worse over time, the roads will have been cleared by the time I have to go home today but idk if I would feel okay to get in a car if the roads are this bad again. Any advice on how I can work through this anxiety?

TLDR; I got into an accident last year and now I have horrible car anxiety. Any advice?",1.807838739360477,3.283815475155284,3.4996204278813003,91.2134149988498,77.47826086956522,6.509500805152979,21.55325511847251,7.242747475848597,0.49752413158500103,1181,31,267,14,27,394,150,322,0.182,0.7240000000000001,0.094,-0.9833,0,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,2,0,0,4,19,11,0,1,25,1,28,5,3,2,1,49,47,25,1,6,16,1,2,0,0,2,2,0,2,0,18,23,0,1,2,0,0,23,9,8,0,2,24,3,27,3,42,21,2,82,0,0,1,0,5,29,0,7,30,180,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19317562097523566,0.08761796999032555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13443266721519198,0.0,0.2268428748797249,0.11166396395205797,0.0,0.06911301960235956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41264706529448375,0.060253510157109634,0.10916384729798777,0.0,0.0,0.10372917379118028,0.08741821632373069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514411756738173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857391628505944,0.06374527733773318,0.20380468855837125,0.0,0.0,0.10258297716768426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754517449937457,0.0,0.0,0.06528458192907563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04997777071480365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407543523473443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492348179671245,0.0,0.05617450747686965,0.0,0.4743205716824979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712891534908552,0.0,0.0,0.09914715175377507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05432128872850815,0.16113976551683948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981542673117082,0.0,0.09906621693222624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597817961510449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697828006147707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633210781019484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003395266069164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176359112002961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996127619653167,0.0,0.15787160006465595,0.08263681015760015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527178896173068,0.0,0.28107358258437204,0.0,0.0,0.0671076133903269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195856447747144,0.0,0.1007290180190649,0.07021492219372591,0.0,0.0,0.2546054845335749
mentalhealth,Be-Worried23,2020/02/06,"Am I having anorexic tendencies? I’ve never liked how I looked, I was a fat kid and I know I’ve slimmed down after becoming a teenager but I still wasn’t in content with my body, I thought I still looked fat and disgusting.

So I started a diet and it actually worked, lost some weight and people around me noticed it, I was actually happy with myself for a while.

But then I wanted to lose more, I liked seeing the numbers on the scales dropped, it always made me happy to see that I had lost weight, even if I had a terrible day so I lost more just because it felt good to do so because I didn’t want to become fat again.

I actually had thought about how if I’m not careful I might become anorexic but it was mostly just a joke to myself, back then it just seemed impossible. So I stared to reduce my portions. 

That was my first mistake, later I became even more strict with my diet refusing to eat any fast food, or anything fried or oily, among other things, and restrict to two very small meals everyday or one big meal with no snacks allowed.

And i know this is so bad for me but I just can’t stop, I keep saying to myself that I’ll try to maintain my weight when I go down to 125 lbs, then it’s 120 lbs, now 105 lbs, but I never do I just want to keep going just because I kept getting reminded of the fat person I used to be.

Now I’m seriously considering just not eating anything at all, I never thought I’d get to this point and the thing is I had these thoughts before and I had promised myself I would never consider them seriously because I know it’s unhealthy, yet here I am now.

I still feel fat no matter what the scales or my BMI tell me, I honestly don’t know what to do at this point.",4.37864795261396,4.55874620679887,5.5096536183363405,84.1397984805563,69.93484419263456,8.231212979654908,28.510043780582023,8.00094639256281,1.6614260623229464,1333,44,285,16,22,444,170,353,0.168,0.752,0.08,-0.9849,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,6,29,19,1,0,11,0,24,17,6,5,5,69,58,31,0,7,20,0,5,2,0,2,5,1,0,2,20,13,16,6,11,1,0,2,12,10,0,3,21,11,50,9,32,34,7,41,0,4,5,0,6,12,0,10,28,204,70,1,0.0,0.0,0.24963483405256634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095180482377686,0.0,0.0,0.0579867969901107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034054966558696,0.0759087356097339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655676752391752,0.07119722341145998,0.2079201809381076,0.282523376931668,0.07255883111888195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471619310547112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869388571888329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0549923546505922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17450581679677213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264059182417978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04311527703037519,0.0,0.08187295751654593,0.0,0.0,0.07253095985974459,0.10310930782906468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910053063780783,0.0,0.09692226833129697,0.07152076705698576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18154385574718374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515845013828603,0.0,0.0,0.187449530355534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331762188711206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432113225321572,0.09539576782858042,0.279248147936623,0.0,0.0,0.08068491554483935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045842070227078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630631612139511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708091714800593,0.0,0.0,0.057781430795456876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059115759777229535,0.07445482545879895,0.0,0.0,0.16121618228116713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781044568659096,0.0,0.0,0.13589893981939752,0.07762697089081341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06035482898637143,0.0,0.20429115808881212,0.07128987371571782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453008925769418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329973146432787,0.0,0.0,0.2707806956214312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578930052459149,0.0,0.08329679188160011,0.0,0.0,0.07364624877687569,0.0,0.07035701138349246,0.15088407605468074,0.0,0.0,0.3115091307300299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062077867775629236,0.0,0.0,0.06057364661829586,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SniperGG,2020/02/06,Just wasted a year of my life. Didn’t even know I was about to turn 23 I’m turning 23 in 6 days. I thought I would turn 22 but I’m turning 23. I just wasting my life. I have no family because they are all assholes . I love my boyfriend but I’m just draining his money being useless. I honestly want to die. I want to die so fucking badly. I can’t get help. I am that person in the shoes that stay inside and are scared of the world. I’m that person. I’m scared of any interaction with anyone. How do people with that bad of social anxiety even get help! ? I can’t call anyone I can’t message anyone . I tried talking to my doctor and she didn’t want to give me meds just in case I’m bipolar .  I tried asking for help . I’m can’t put myself out there again. But I have no job . No life goals . Birthday is in 6 days..... and guess what my boyfriends mom took it on herself to plan a birthday celebration . Now I didn’t have these as a kid. When ever it was my birthday it was never about me . Or they were just not there.  I watch cartoons of kids with great birthdays and I dream of being happy like that’s but the fear is too much. And I hate people doing things for me. I just feel like I have a debt to pay back now. And on top of that we might not make rent. I’m so useless. I want to just disappear . The amount of pain I’m in is not worth this life. It’s not worth saving the pain everyone around me might be in. Everyone would be better off anyways . I whole year of just being usless.,-0.9018353344768464,1.2210498427672971,1.3292652944539751,98.40497855917671,94.59748427672956,3.897198399085192,16.346769582618638,5.565023196281405,-0.7322918238993714,1142,29,266,8,44,380,151,318,0.23399999999999999,0.625,0.141,-0.9896,3,0,0,0,0,2,39.0,1,0,2,4,26,19,2,3,9,0,32,11,1,2,3,47,62,16,2,6,17,1,1,2,0,4,8,0,1,4,14,12,0,0,3,1,6,3,15,11,0,0,9,2,40,8,36,44,4,28,0,2,1,2,22,13,1,4,13,176,54,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456557578119686,0.0,0.07263235011683873,0.0,0.0,0.1991623909742324,0.0,0.0,0.08452081294127975,0.08876037341244125,0.0,0.0,0.07300652776482644,0.158549530658415,0.057877339737738114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397077269428829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969490400183778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246280966975293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19707498551906785,0.0,0.0,0.09717980919426904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542001015685106,0.08588281572915607,0.0,0.18144724561855816,0.0,0.0,0.08950530792592704,0.10683905791912007,0.048006836571896534,0.06782843279827983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777474189667145,0.09920925730768236,0.0910795004693877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467674370115368,0.10459216807661233,0.0,0.0,0.10107027965223266,0.0,0.09373812443270264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19091806842220888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421785362234043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05217906267259445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26824868203157115,0.09277025994001482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569119775666383,0.0,0.06337624989654363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546203379194606,0.0,0.0,0.20144240827428053,0.0,0.11119795422423596,0.0,0.0,0.06979519680921124,0.0,0.07322711958679673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020554719237493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164524567241342,0.16580390450797655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544553503667247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901121920597549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678405104076113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011982982676893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631286357762679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307696559871112,0.0,0.0,0.07537539763669114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105486930981676,0.12892228615571993,0.4130897918528901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22400311225664665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600224208573432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13489182276248204,0.0,0.0,0.12228240387172178
mentalhealth,6inn3r,2020/02/06,"I don't care anymore, i stopped feeling Im royally fucking up my life right before my eyes, and i do not care. I dont feel stress, sadness or anything. I occasionally feel very happy or angry, but thats it. I have no interest in anything anymore, no motivation. Im not even motivated to seek help for this. So basically im in a vicious circle.",2.5031904761904755,4.2585708428571465,5.6485714285714295,75.34476190476191,76.28571428571428,8.095238095238095,33.09523809523809,8.841846274778883,3.084380952380952,269,15,52,6,6,99,49,70,0.228,0.532,0.24,-0.0034,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,2,8,2,1,1,0,4,3,1,2,0,12,10,5,0,0,5,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,0,4,8,4,5,10,0,5,0,1,1,1,1,4,1,2,1,31,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3479544265035399,0.0,0.0,0.28872422165984696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14927611505917115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35772061508460107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20560004495617007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586839042328335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661046610956003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16218015053048382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18674612780352454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758553925134438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5684762993883089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390982500039074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981436072708787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666547444659625,0.20095192274665388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447462860763828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MarieHadALittleLamb,2020/02/06,"A friend of mine is mentally draining another friend of mine So lemme invent names to make this easier to explain. Apple and Orange.

Apple: She's amazing. She really is. But she has so many problems at home. Her father is a dick(alcoholic and verbally abusive to her, her mom, and siblings). Her mom has Stockholm syndrome so she can't leave. But she's such a sweet girl though. She means a lot to me. However everytime I give her advice, she finds reasons to not do them. It's like she's stuck in a hole and I throw a rope at her so she can climb up. But then she burns the rope and digs a deeper hole so that it's harder for me to find another rope long enough. She also self harms a lot and isn't afraid to show her cuts publicly. idk what to do to help her anymore. 

Orange: He's great. Basically trying to help Apple as much as I am. If not, even more. He suggested she reports her dad to the police but when she said it would feel ""morally wrong"" 🙄 anyway Orange is starting to lose it and idk what to do at this point. He's stressed. Hasn't showered in a month.

I need advice for Orange. Not Apple. I'm done helping her. I'll help her if she asks for it cause she won't take advice anymore anyway so yeah.",-0.006249411764706282,2.3306044879999988,1.9568470588235307,94.12936470588235,92.12,4.701176470588236,18.152941176470584,6.37848985222837,-0.0355882352941177,942,27,202,11,34,311,129,250,0.092,0.789,0.11900000000000001,0.6899,2,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,1,2,13,13,1,2,11,1,17,0,0,3,0,30,29,25,0,5,9,4,1,1,2,2,0,1,2,2,10,7,0,0,6,1,0,2,7,7,0,0,3,3,35,6,26,24,5,14,1,1,0,0,49,7,0,4,6,134,45,1,0.0,0.14278533421475298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532846394174239,0.0,0.12878916307374225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637226927823644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527317065047126,0.0,0.0,0.2390282313418021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266112689561285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379756438529856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332416626816567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451964622178192,0.0,0.07959610317248562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06093377144496431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220288978325746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18621235418519574,0.0,0.0,0.11560473176797666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13286334263530972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231028127568305,0.0,0.12088194007009255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760330650278925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058875383380124637,0.0,0.0,0.1066480732570608,0.0,0.13482051639349085,0.0,0.20490757546812052,0.0,0.0,0.08044174959229923,0.12217881576133352,0.0,0.13127135321980868,0.0,0.0,0.12144632275874485,0.0,0.0,0.28228107543389924,0.09619039720575392,0.0,0.0885891442557255,0.08935706993252777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392145291597652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531235213357277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720216499312532,0.12390494980922227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463316059400665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12571881991885714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529801055121412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804446507990745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060896030568308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11840103543109415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181877498853682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560726018359892,0.13175940388499208,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,quitegreatmusicpr,2020/02/06,"Music Therapy for Relaxation and Stress Management Relaxation and [Music Therapy](https://www.quitegreat.co.uk/blog/music-therapy-for-relaxation-and-stress-management/) sometimes get mixed up, the importance of allowing relaxing music to permeate your life is key to helping your brain and body come to terms with many physical and mental issues. The power of therapy within music has been well documented, it is working with musicians and other creatives that encouraged us to take the next step and set up a service to help musicians to find the right kind of care to help them through mental health issues, issues that can stem from stage fright right through to the traumatic circumstances when a major label ‘drop’ an artist and the phone stops ringing and there is no longer a support structure, they are simply left to their own dark vision of the future. 

Today is  **Time to Talk Day 2020** – Conversation about Mental Health  
[https://www.time-to-change.org.uk/time-talk-day/resources-your-event](https://www.time-to-change.org.uk/time-talk-day/resources-your-event)",9.053458646616544,12.20765339766082,6.7010568086883895,68.77434210526317,61.807017543859644,10.265831244778612,33.85171261487051,10.451354775682146,4.319743191311612,885,37,118,23,14,254,105,171,0.075,0.737,0.188,0.9546,1,0,0,0,0,0,61.0,1,2,3,2,4,10,0,2,11,0,8,5,2,1,0,14,13,9,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,11,0,1,1,4,0,2,1,2,1,0,1,1,6,8,24,12,3,19,0,0,0,0,13,6,0,0,8,66,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702291206957933,0.0,0.1276582874614981,0.0,0.0,0.1165928068902607,0.0,0.0,0.09850692904426546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22124904307026466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451863407464247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05974590245596224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431085834821481,0.0,0.0,0.2299497567582484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580715367108418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908340372620825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242473223955446,0.0,0.08077250059888129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11593828282546904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3457296102039795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216181141951243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19531753097886406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310027419978355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956061161617777,0.2619871233027609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976899158594987,0.0,0.0,0.08598092231441125,0.275743273995318,0.0,0.0,0.2615504073221188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334073527473146,0.0,0.10839541335682844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375552951598432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281911043948136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325198977486399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaydreams666,2020/02/06,"breaking https://twitter.com/oblixicon/status/1225359736842964992?s=21

cant take much more",39.26285714285714,51.37063242857143,12.425714285714285,18.444285714285733,10.428571428571416,8.514285714285714,35.57142857142857,8.841846274778883,4.429685714285716,85,2,5,1,1,15,7,7,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6990922812122002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7150314554965551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fuckedthro-away,2020/02/06,"For the last two years of my life I’ve felt empty. Two years ago, almost to the day, one of my best friends took his own life. He didn’t leave any note as far as I’m aware, and while he always made edgy depressed jokes, who didn’t in high school. The last thing I ever talked to him about was a Latin essay due the next day. Just a Latin essay. I didn’t find out until the next day. I got in like I normally did, and noticed he wasn’t there yet. I didn’t think anything of it until the dean of students called me into his office and told me. I know life isn’t perfect or anything but I always figured that if someone close to you died you’d get a little bit of closure. It’s super selfish but I just want to know how this dude I’ve known since 4th grade goes from asking me about Latin homework to killing himself. I still have the discord message “@(my discord name) do we have to type the essay or does she want it hand written?” I respond that our teacher wants it hand written, he says “k”.  
I knew this guy from 4th grade until junior year, and all I can remember about him is the last time we talked, and what he looked like during the wake. It’s only been two years and I barely remember one of my best friends. I remember a corpse and an inane discord message about homework. 
We were all pretty fucking destroyed after the fact. We were pretty tight knit, so this really fucked us up. I guess during that time I rationalized that one of use would need to be the strong one. We couldn’t all be crying our eyes out. So I went home, sat in the bathtub and cried for like 4 hours. And after that, not a tear was shed. I just kinda shut off. And I don’t think I’ve turned back on again fully since. 
I still talk to my friends from then often even though we’ve all graduated and gone on to college. Some of them will come to lay out their problems in DMs or on Snapchat. Relationship stuff, problems with their parents, shit at their school. I just listen and support as best I can, but part of me is going fucking crazy like: tell him what’s going on with you. I barely sleep, I have no drive or motivation whatsoever, I miss classes all the time. I’m wasting away and I don’t even have anyone to talk to. I have friends in college and if I’m ever bored or something I can text them and we’ll do something. I’m not alone, but I feel so fucking alone. I didn’t really grow up in a household where I felt comfortable talking about shit with my family. I’d die for my bro’s from high school. I just want so much for them. They’re the people in my life I’m closest to. And yet I don’t even feel like I can tell them how I feel. 
Maybe this is just 3 am me talking, and in the morning I’ll feel entirely different. I don’t know. Just had to get this rant off my chest.",1.6883324461006095,3.4596464238754336,2.8519204152249134,94.4134382486026,78.70588235294117,5.484216129890871,21.496007452754856,6.197336934236889,0.08816358796912382,2155,60,485,15,52,691,253,578,0.14800000000000002,0.705,0.147,-0.6882,2,2,2,0,0,0,61.0,9,3,7,7,33,32,8,0,23,0,40,16,8,5,9,100,88,43,3,12,20,2,9,5,4,3,4,2,3,1,20,31,0,1,19,1,0,8,15,14,0,7,25,13,76,18,69,56,13,71,0,2,2,4,57,30,6,12,38,306,96,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055963348935171235,0.0,0.06321830168485516,0.13077292053497944,0.0,0.0,0.10506296449575113,0.0,0.0,0.042932415944356164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0441438672043788,0.0,0.1039057020709405,0.0,0.05902057287668565,0.0,0.059315270619317226,0.04854516634800175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19876169060777646,0.0,0.06892458130645901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446556793019696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054383249939786944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869666149511933,0.12214614875286628,0.0,0.05437612103933236,0.0,0.13104359634622226,0.06596025748427621,0.0,0.0,0.05524787055756514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509570259344216,0.11421432312016695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951591173175385,0.0,0.12768720488837462,0.045102029285977785,0.12123462750647925,0.0,0.05770216425782801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19510473796183064,0.2334607371139624,0.06596848318519123,0.0,0.07175956173229213,0.0,0.05049300515090015,0.0,0.0695478110441454,0.06251132059589681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340637426077107,0.06332726779834713,0.0,0.06217301415451185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984700311767245,0.0,0.10408827901596047,0.15438478418205115,0.0,0.06684843706322985,0.0,0.0,0.17837003471528967,0.15421729531647208,0.06327557310991913,0.0,0.0,0.05301558618542504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597377081406489,0.0,0.0,0.06342530496858062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046409814890923766,0.04681211348867861,0.0,0.0,0.13428473236653046,0.0,0.06185666331631156,0.0,0.07187702255685173,0.0,0.0,0.1711214655428306,0.04801528002989476,0.0,0.0,0.07010141664311645,0.06836658580032956,0.0,0.043768280356224806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284573500071651,0.0,0.12081897758731892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088887677178203,0.0,0.0,0.06778091677856074,0.2145512014672674,0.0,0.0,0.050205674579428726,0.0,0.19168105579481548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12960966399737425,0.10444808024080278,0.0,0.06317831580138515,0.0,0.05349215056572626,0.09720530772357923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008357468490502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227186243823824,0.0,0.0716422648875953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3044621436155817,0.11036156361342103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041942575293820304,0.08090579827396281,0.06202757892534499,0.0,0.11043959387713016,0.0,0.0,0.06032602146422995,0.07014277721221544,0.0,0.06867027263218743,0.18501448785839367,0.0,0.07594089136468116,0.05452640168708725,0.0,0.0,0.14894926083867396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05852466589055976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04484767441675788,0.0,0.0,0.1626216125908198
mentalhealth,wtbthrowaway15,2020/02/06,"For the last year i've noticed a lot of signs of depression, but I don't feel ""sad""... First off I apologize if this isn't the right place to post this. I'm a 23 yo male and basically for about the past year I have experienced a lot of signs of depression but I haven't really experienced any ""sadness"" and would consider myself above average on a ""happiness"" scale. Not completely sure, but I would say I started noticing changes in myself about a year ago and ever since then they have progressively gotten worse. Here are some of the things I've been struggling with:

​

* Weight gain  
 
* No motivation to workout or eat healthy (even though I was always in great shape throughout HS and 1st two years of college)  
 
* No motivation to do things that I NEED to do, and I really only complete these things if there is an immediate negative consequence. (going to college class, keeping up with work, keeping house clean, house projects, managing bank statements, etc.).   
 
* Not wanting to make plans with friends/family and I hate having anything planned that I HAVE to do. I would rather just stay at my own house and do my own thing, unless I am the one who makes plans to do something I enjoy in advance (and even then leading up to the event I end up wishing I didn't have plans). Now when I do actually do something and make plans, I almost always have a good time and enjoy the experience though. I have always been content with being by myself, but I use to always try to make plans with people whether it's going out to the bars or just hanging with a small group at someones house.   
 
* Sleep schedule. I have always stayed up late and liked to sleep in, but for about the past 3 weeks I have been on break and haven't had much to do, and I have been staying up until the morning most nights and sleeping for 10-13 hours basically every day. I set my alarm for 7-8 hours of sleep every night and just wake up extremely tired still and no motivation to get out of bed.   
 

There are other smaller things, but these are just some of the main problems i've had. Like I mentioned before, I am generally really happy and don't experience intense sadness or anything along those lines. I have always been a very ""If you don't like something, then change it"" type of person and it has worked for me in the past.... But now I feel like i'm stuck in a rut and even when I tell myself i'm going to wake up early and go to the gym and change my life, etc. I try it and force myself to do it but then I have 0 motivation to keep going and just go back to my old ways. It's a weird feeling because I have always been able to tell myself i'm going to do something and then I would just do it and i'd stay motivated. I'm not really sure what i'm looking for or what i'm asking, but I guess i'm just trying to see if anyone else has experienced this or has any advice.",5.1959519639729805,5.441633108581442,5.858385789342005,82.11838178633978,68.1768826619965,8.767395546659996,28.923742807105327,8.591530228387361,1.9382827220415308,2239,72,460,32,35,730,246,571,0.10400000000000001,0.7829999999999999,0.113,0.8231,0,0,4,0,0,0,71.0,0,1,1,18,26,22,1,2,24,0,54,11,6,11,3,104,92,55,0,13,31,0,4,4,0,4,2,1,2,2,24,34,3,3,9,3,1,10,14,10,0,3,12,10,48,12,73,75,11,79,0,5,2,0,12,24,0,16,41,316,72,14,0.05785233430244292,0.0,0.056455532979632475,0.0,0.0,0.05653263152259162,0.051282603749005735,0.0,0.05793075605152057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369644361545465,0.06268298004624694,0.07029691843100905,0.07868314233347178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04045169727804033,0.05927655316542239,0.09521508358513286,0.0,0.054084123081708214,0.0,0.0,0.04448487406709775,0.0,0.03526624602481577,0.0,0.04922807546561843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18360029623861984,0.0,0.12131414365878118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03730996962087114,0.0,0.09965626152567644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059197380842490974,0.04832820186029382,0.0,0.05123999670940455,0.0,0.12904129064230938,0.11463276356521232,0.05233074848520503,0.0974861736010536,0.0,0.0,0.1131813678807837,0.05453803205444277,0.0,0.08775563547439873,0.041329719185108194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04920916600377927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030225456905983824,0.0,0.23015170354151845,0.048523793227479205,0.0,0.06378240280512483,0.06373086856398151,0.0,0.0,0.12316977124947125,0.0,0.057117202917897576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113945791645194,0.26701530552772795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15426543864662048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715737390469228,0.06525995296346893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04086281461460133,0.11305491322357493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04858139033133785,0.0,0.0,0.09836797160976916,0.0,0.0,0.15446752951047502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0425281222871954,0.0428967728409952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085809934364778,0.0,0.0,0.1317305320920425,0.060706293040296885,0.0,0.03920223895351513,0.04399930716303382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567979765926713,0.04010752431709885,0.05051442684433476,0.0604433761043678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05540654439947884,0.0,0.0,0.0553568707990288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482467469913131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04940557739450198,0.0,0.04600649825997578,0.0,0.0,0.046100820272075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047856048764507816,0.0,0.2315764582655828,0.0,0.04901809511653913,0.1781502134213986,0.0,0.0,0.04094817998359961,0.2466515634735697,0.046200948904837655,0.0,0.0,0.06047982090136995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905028085159772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113098025037702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921726013482044,0.0,0.11367924943961047,0.0,0.033734161367902984,0.06649274785848436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783381239319735,0.0,0.056513324340532835,0.0,0.0,0.04996584201594576,0.0,0.04773423458610024,0.0341228056738776,0.0459204901647713,0.04640565297840878,0.0704485576707721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652732934805089,0.0,0.0,0.08423437678030908,0.0,0.058956471117380775,0.16438655369558106,0.0,0.07029691843100905,0.14902002610994772
mentalhealth,Imanonymoushere,2020/02/06,"Thoughts Welcome \-I have to preface this with I'm a psychology major, so I might just be going through the ""I have this, I have that, I have everything"" phase every student goes through after learning about illnesses - 

I have no idea where to start with this. Things just feel different, so I just wanted to get some thoughts. I've always been an extreme empath of sorts. I'm very in tune with people's feelings, and I often end up feeling what they are, extremely happy if they are, or extremely sad, etc. I started really feeling it with my boyfriend. Even if we texted, I felt like whenever he gets sad, or feels low energy, I feel that way, to an extreme. It tanks my mood. He does nothing to provoke this, it's just as if I absorb his energy. It happens with anyone, but mostly those that I'm close to. And it's extremely difficult to shake off. 

I also have been feeling as though I've been faking my negative emotions for the past few years. I definitely feel them, and I know some of them are real, but it's as if when my friends talk about their illnesses, or I think about being low, I just become it. I feel as if I do it for attention, but I don't know why. But either way, I get sucked into this mood and it doesn't go away for days at a time. It used to be easy to shake off, but now it feels deeper and heavier. 

I don't engage in any of my hobbies anymore, if I have time I sleep if I can. I've been exceedingly tired for the past few months. Recently I've had trouble sleeping despite being exhausted. I just feel like I get up, go to class, come back, eat, homework, sleep, repeat. Like I'm just going through the motions without even thinking about it, like I'm in a heavy, dreary dream. I'm an introvert, so keeping up with friends has always been somewhat difficult, but hanging out with them has just been exhausting, and I've had barely any energy to text, what normally had come easily to me. I've noticed that it's the most extreme around my period too..I know that irritable mood is common, but I've never experienced it quite this bad. I also have found breathing at some points to be a little more difficult. Not life threatening, but almost as if I have a knot somewhere. I've also noticed I'm holding my breath more than normal. Light headedness in these periods as well, I've been taking iron supplements to help, but sometimes I still feel woozy, like I'm about to faint or throw up at random times when I have to sit and wait for it to pass, drink water etc. I'll throw in that I have a panic attack every now and then, normally cued. 

But I'm able to do my homework, and do it well. I find a tiny bit of solace keeping my room clean and staying on top of hygiene. It just makes laying in bed more comfortable. 

I don't know if this is just who I am now, if school is a little overbearing right now, if I'm overthinking things, or if something else is going on. I'm just wanting thoughts from an outside perspective.",3.9947417271993535,5.0642651440677975,5.048571428571427,83.88717514124295,71.28813559322033,8.195318805488299,28.11541565778854,8.563005593585519,1.9674229217110568,2305,83,465,38,42,758,258,590,0.129,0.746,0.125,-0.8615,1,0,2,0,0,0,84.0,1,0,6,2,38,33,2,3,17,0,45,15,5,3,1,117,102,53,0,17,41,0,13,5,2,1,7,0,5,0,37,24,3,4,27,2,0,15,9,17,2,0,15,15,53,13,74,81,16,77,0,4,0,0,16,31,1,28,32,314,90,6,0.0728641057848754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296287674527878,0.0,0.0,0.17480819721326554,0.12125754606966155,0.0,0.0,0.0991001811007374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722616137693111,0.050948276939629465,0.0,0.0,0.06486450223604825,0.0,0.08289343933414207,0.06845822592458042,0.05602799971573488,0.060838484794639075,0.0,0.08047268019734187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07954873187913979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553195060964267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04699132033417097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612748221082052,0.0,0.0,0.06376386999488844,0.0,0.0,0.07137908401439065,0.0,0.07455817076187847,0.06086861066542242,0.08196231176746566,0.06453597051300079,0.0,0.1625254774132951,0.09625210934632404,0.0,0.1227823034537424,0.0,0.06548555997478285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4421073744749861,0.05205413173165173,0.0699609681711374,0.0,0.06659647264280003,0.0,0.0,0.07989173109092892,0.1125892547643308,0.0,0.1522739516701438,0.0,0.2070517523576072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443348810816057,0.07756519551054146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048839274198170746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225470638168582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952993025005638,0.0,0.0,0.16017682791351334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146607276346906,0.17798860789171786,0.1460579521677318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04863735641045839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729730161859569,0.0,0.0,0.058159434073369376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05619729031093286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21417405946402346,0.06991507465638817,0.16591253475224418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854903286899319,0.0,0.0,0.13911406743417354,0.05051479650471337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888013172704582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749994552227868,0.0,0.08293530436604453,0.04667861195785219,0.0,0.07194451407134493,0.0,0.0,0.062225548217573465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374236508324547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21875018211198208,0.0,0.0,0.056094348451324216,0.0720644637516024,0.0,0.10314717820805824,0.07766344188891351,0.058189369002203985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054784739500375934,0.05856540818661071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681534840331568,0.09337675372661446,0.07158861398236828,0.17353788298078396,0.1274629381223333,0.08374657085674529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293119270256496,0.0,0.06012051821899945,0.08595427487160788,0.1156722712541588,0.0,0.0,0.13102716345584575,0.0,0.06574852218418675,0.0,0.0,0.07023839781494139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04692209518191221
mentalhealth,chaoticshirt,2020/02/06,"Just diagnosed with BPD. Need advise I was just diagnosed with borderline personality disorder Monday after I slit my throat in front of my gf and my boss after I convinced myself they were having an affair.  When I was 18 I was misdiagnosed with bipolar disorder and have been struggling with my sanity since. I have ruined countless relationships. After learning about bpd, it makes a lot of since. My gf won’t let me come home and I understand I freaked her out but I’m freaking out not knowing if we will be alright. All I can do is sit here with my thoughts and I don’t know what to do. I don’t wanna freak out again.",2.3725535939470355,4.9032255491803305,3.932295081967212,83.58502522068098,80.39344262295081,7.032534678436318,24.958385876418664,8.139509932561175,1.7805831021437584,495,19,94,10,13,164,80,122,0.142,0.821,0.037000000000000005,-0.8873,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,1,0,6,7,0,1,2,1,18,4,1,2,1,30,26,7,0,3,5,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,1,2,14,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,6,0,22,2,17,16,2,13,0,1,0,0,9,4,0,2,6,75,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4685700750007272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16023932055176968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3776117361878796,0.0,0.0,0.4263889062402701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865927169788938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204462895289604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19021753316512685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814711947038768,0.0,0.0,0.12416945497614927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13793109583048907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624250447863416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19971531791494784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30775449112095715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944679615755482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476786975947105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19365285087964973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InternationalEntry8,2020/02/06,"Is my friend mentally ill or just...different? [serious advice only] I have a friend well call B, B moved here from a foreign country about 10 years ago and recently has been exhibiting some strange behavior.

Examples-

We’re at a restaurant and she tries to order a seasonal special. The waitress calmly explains that the special is no longer available/in season, she proceeds to ask her 3x more if they have it. Finally I snap and say “B she told you they don’t have it drop it.” She proceeds to pout the rest of the evening saying “I took the waitresses side”?

She calls me and tells me her Uber is lost and can’t find my address. I ask her if the Uber has a GPS and she says yes, I tell her to just have him put my exact address in the gps? She said ok but still managed to get lost. I had to walk out onto the street to find her because she was wandering around my street yelling my name. 

We’re walking along when a guy catcalls us so I flip him off and he drives away. About 2 hours later were sitting at the bar and all the sudden I notice she’s red and shaking. I ask her what’s wrong? She EXPLODES saying I ask her too many questions and proceeds to run to the door of the bar and scream I CANT BELIEVE YOU FLIPPED THAT MAN OFF AND EMBARRASSED ME I NEVER WANT TO SEE YOU AGAIN. The whole bar stares as she runs off and slammed the bar door. I had to pay for her tab and she never apologized just moved on like nothing happened. 

....Those are just a few. Also lately she’s taken to going to the hospital to get blood tests ran about every week. I told her it’s pointless because she has no ongoing condition. She says it doesn’t matter because they just bill her insurance (Medicaid) and she wants to “make sure”. 
I’ve met other people from her country and they don’t seem to act like this, so I don’t think it’s a foreign/outsider thing. She was really cool when I first met her but lately I’m wondering if she’s suffering from a mental illness causing her to act this way? She went to a psych who said she was fine but the guy seemed like a quack.

Looking for any advice or knowledge on what could be going on here, thank you!",1.8821044546851016,3.988240036866365,3.0132718894009223,91.8637173579109,79.50691244239631,6.068817204301076,23.92780337941628,7.1686216300943375,0.8925259600614441,1672,59,353,21,42,536,222,434,0.1,0.8140000000000001,0.086,-0.8558,1,0,0,0,1,0,43.0,1,4,4,3,20,22,0,2,27,3,26,7,1,2,5,53,59,30,0,6,12,0,0,3,2,0,2,9,4,3,16,19,4,0,9,4,2,16,10,8,1,1,19,14,68,14,43,38,6,58,0,3,4,0,74,16,0,10,25,231,84,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17364038631777887,0.07875744403301316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105085899880481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060418960092194586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909260565358754,0.3322395498894545,0.0,0.0834746167802692,0.0,0.0,0.16248079433414594,0.0,0.0,0.10010006693487934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18144530143113244,0.0,0.0,0.0912702726355918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709370452399383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928261332830318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058682560302019765,0.0,0.07485737170206028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973274706240922,0.1624089715354243,0.07557315452277595,0.0,0.0,0.13728583772215558,0.0,0.0928377093447181,0.0,0.10098751726797917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759448613042879,0.07856704807936786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874963306486533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004464172011595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021836865638126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460904576516338,0.0,0.19397384211305288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05930601666542189,0.09007684343549906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790736198053512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18886045494220866,0.0,0.0,0.13704846158189155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525102696256708,0.10115282035459468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757209498067218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06159527541087202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931570581669451,0.09952889682434574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05691761935679295,0.0,0.08772562625511847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902755514529394,0.3532732298070191,0.0,0.0,0.0707995013323468,0.16176581910981847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095327424195771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837371814523028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15531226838745002,0.08179831753789847,0.0,0.0,0.05902595339907325,0.05692952620552801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16979410094657527,0.0987122099681804,0.060321234403870924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687191912691613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048084442538432,0.0705225587183768,0.07126764926270576,0.0,0.07988406148102685,0.08236199559404461,0.0,0.09919442608186728,0.0,0.0,0.09635070722524494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714017213988406,0.0,0.05721451090702425
mentalhealth,Farewell-Spaceman,2020/02/06,"Where He may be  

The inevitable decision that plagues my consciousness, dealing with the constant battle of wanting to go on, and standing still.

Through the perpetual limbo, I stay stuck watching the world float by ending with the guaranteed sunset for those as my mind lights up with ideas and delusions of a better tomorrow

knowing full heartedly that upon the rise of my spirits i will sink right back to my old ways. The voice inside my head has taken a more feminine voice, acting out as a guide through dealing with my woes and deciding whether my conscious thought has a more cynical ideology than i so hoped to presume.

I cannot develop a more isolated style of living without having to surround myself with individuals who just look at me as intelligent but have concurrently seen me act out as an introverted individual with a better outlook for someone else's well being other than my own.

The decision has made me think of such paradoxes that could evidently lead me to a successful life, but on the other hand i wish to disappear for a few years and return as someone not formally known to those who have seen me in the past or present. To embark on the future endeavors only comes about in a time of need, seeing that the time i have spent alive has created such turmoil for those to be ""lucky"" enough to deal with me.

I see everyday has a failure with passing time and it seems to be getting worse. I have lost touch with everything I so formally came to know and love. Living is a chore at this point. The grandiose illusions I have set for myself are becoming increasingly concerning as time comes along with the evidence being so clear as day, but knowing these possibilities are still very slim it does not act as a deterrent for me. 

The voice tells me that It'll be okay, but cannot include the 'When' Parameter. so I seem to be left at a stand still. 

I do not have control over the things i do, or how i perform them. I do not see myself as a leader or a human for that fact. I believe I have lost all touch in reality and lost all faith in humanity.

The idea that in order for me to be happy, Everyone else must be content. This belief will be the end of me. Knowing that when i look down at my feet, there are some odd 7billion individuals who exist like I do. But do I exist? Does this subjective persona made from the experiences i have had portray who i was meant to become? If there is some sort of truth in all this, It's that my life, by story, and my own mind are just as much as an enigma as the next big discovery waiting to be made. but the idea that it does not set aside the anguish dealt with daily, Who will pursue some sort of grandiose pipe dream, in order to take the risk let alone sacrifice to complete such a goal. The voice tells me it's not important. 

I am no longer me, I guess. He died years ago if i think about it. Whoever I may be destined to become, the voice still says ""Farewell\_Spaceman"" when it's time to depart.",8.4528125,6.801267684027781,8.381388888888889,72.9691666666667,62.26388888888889,11.797222222222222,36.95833333333333,10.66633372479733,3.72000625,2350,90,454,47,27,764,270,576,0.083,0.809,0.10800000000000001,0.9523,2,1,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,1,10,24,21,2,3,44,1,51,7,4,6,7,97,90,40,1,8,21,0,3,1,0,7,2,6,1,2,34,25,0,2,21,1,1,13,10,9,1,0,16,18,53,12,91,53,16,77,4,4,8,1,17,28,0,17,29,336,87,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911700592262482,0.0,0.0,0.08075493063867215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059955249530839715,0.0,0.0,0.2583400967084023,0.0,0.08784714897925185,0.0,0.13791886244476415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917859280699482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433103914256805,0.0817516055425004,0.08425946199794833,0.08745163655988797,0.06225387626758332,0.0,0.0,0.050285149402319484,0.24115549357688296,0.0,0.0,0.08092207844169634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20470008331505266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13027032053818044,0.0,0.1381191631131972,0.08056537427510982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07450508345491699,0.07007573193537091,0.07627106174672901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04073687627503565,0.0,0.044312984726854965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589436764072526,0.0,0.0,0.08300208244694578,0.0,0.0,0.08002122564893129,0.0,0.0,0.09239657043854416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744326548471228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26406090550551664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714043288237548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847162331117599,0.07973111345336764,0.11014711396307672,0.038092923016838635,0.0,0.13770047760321022,0.0,0.13095279871882587,0.0,0.2553452189587755,0.0,0.07037229822307144,0.22133547791131467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574579202975771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057318003867133725,0.05781485895341343,0.0,0.0,0.0829235456677837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081817944270978,0.0,0.0,0.05930081843470667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443259324429853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370824420584036,0.08790111991751327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658721156397403,0.0,0.062006044550256,0.0,0.0,0.18639950596373414,0.14196460048658865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13212995139901834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310721534765049,0.2490724749246736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586248437190706,0.0,0.1363010075529108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051800781764352516,0.09992194257270044,0.0,0.0619006397393871,0.22732896348943055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433463072091808,0.045989594705469684,0.061890125669562326,0.0,0.0,0.07010571785688025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966334547033983,0.07516171715940335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945959185966782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004221439071398
mentalhealth,Patrickhump,2020/02/06,"disassociation or spirituality I've gotten stuck at a state of depression. I realized the sadness ive felt since 5th grade wasn't just imagined sadness. I knew one day it would finally catch me, and I finally embraced depression. I told my parents, I broke up with my gf. We had just made a year. I quit my job. Ive finally let me seek help. My therapist made me realize, there are words for all these things I've always been. More than anything else, I've been in a disassociative state of being for the majority of my life. Therapy tells me things, but ive learned that my third eye is noticably open. I smoked weed then went to a reiki session. I can say with full confidence, that on that day, I experienced rebirth, or even just, awakening. That whole day I felt like i was literally inside of a dream, Except i wasn't. I saw the other side. I lived it for a day. Im fighting depression hard these days, I've gotten more discourgaed by the day. I feel like a young boy inside my head. I've been idle for a long time. And now i finally saw my own reflection. Through therapy, reiki, and the dramatic life events ive experienced in the last months. I've snapped myself out of my sleep. I have made all the appropriate measures.  Therapy, meditation, prayer, family, scheduled an appointment with a psychiatrist. I'm determined to see the other side of this agonizing depression, and am excited to embrace that new person. Ive kept a decent distance from all friends. So this brings me to my reddit peers. What is happening to me",2.6645885450954587,5.238836571428571,4.604628044766294,78.94152402896644,79.54421768707482,8.691507570770245,27.170945797673912,9.285337120503966,2.815941321044547,1208,52,230,36,31,411,162,294,0.11199999999999999,0.79,0.09699999999999999,-0.5287,2,0,1,0,2,0,44.0,1,0,0,1,7,12,1,0,19,0,21,5,3,3,3,35,40,9,0,1,7,1,4,2,2,1,2,1,0,2,16,10,0,1,9,1,0,3,2,8,0,2,21,11,40,4,29,16,9,36,0,7,4,0,11,10,0,2,23,145,56,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185375884845819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095214446988562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806525525820035,0.0,0.3389121881363312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217755909369746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649740754489889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273679093138704,0.0,0.049740066478846455,0.07027729793213336,0.1889059577107084,0.431048842248375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600231084268122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699043265052438,0.0,0.08812239287712344,0.0,0.10095851414732383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659369796293611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062591267917126,0.0,0.09761947750193738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018667634188027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059249505723114,0.13896674130080247,0.0961196201662973,0.0,0.08686467561236744,0.08705652264505417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27924717219465106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851995105804745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950087252026532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199768632745298,0.0,0.0,0.06665971801559084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923096412481303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589502893330574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046312094738394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822972061701003,0.0,0.0,0.07839010632193501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137470718866717,0.0,0.0984434934018534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598185723682937,0.0,0.33749240943973996,0.1142179965000517,0.1307085692874204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057361766682339374,0.0,0.0,0.09399909162890004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911922466967168,0.0,0.10982932733663578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.069880966032934,0.0,0.0,0.06334863252928047
mentalhealth,FirstwayForward,2020/02/06,Post Trauma Flashbacks | Hypnotherapy for Health Anxiety Lynda Hudson has helped very many people cope with the aftermath of trauma and have recording for you to listen for on-going support and comfort. Feel relaxed!,7.9891666666666685,10.969515138888896,7.1177777777777775,65.405,64.27777777777777,8.133333333333335,34.22222222222222,8.841846274778883,3.718622222222223,179,8,21,3,3,55,32,36,0.166,0.636,0.198,0.3382,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,3,6,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,12,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28634717389616193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18926307572237747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127297778632784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39787548325122707,0.0,0.0,0.2508930215001604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794929791928821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595003741068693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35848682371810997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4247641074513985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088460817193137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RecklessEccie,2020/02/06,"Starting to figure out how my brain works Been noticing more and more that whenever I smoke weed or do any other party prescriptions, if I'm not happy before I do it, doing it doesn't make me happy. But when I practice gratefulness and meditate in the morning, and my headspace is completely different to the days I don’t practice gratefulness, and ends up making weed/drugs a much better experience. 

This morning is a prime example, I woke up tired, got to the gym and couldn’t get out my own head. So I sat down in the corner of the gym, out of people way, a few deep breaths, shut my eyes and pictured the things that I’m grateful for; my friends, the gym, my girlfriend. And now I’m feeling nothing but good wibes and positivity. 

Remember everyday is a good day to have a good day.",10.365670995670996,6.718572233766235,9.974545454545453,69.26515151515154,60.42857142857143,13.383549783549785,42.54978354978356,11.20814326018867,4.565947186147187,620,26,120,12,6,203,96,154,0.099,0.787,0.114,0.1217,1,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,4,7,0,0,12,0,11,5,4,3,0,23,22,15,0,2,5,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,7,11,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,2,13,7,15,17,5,20,0,0,1,0,2,11,0,2,8,80,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390216493390044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252568478516586,0.0,0.0,0.14813548373616922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869795205483472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17561504523134988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3240607469964349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17499635093431593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942407190899983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14835062208552222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384199269984426,0.0,0.0,0.08469037178104755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294060184704982,0.0,0.08750908709560594,0.0,0.0,0.4214599164830494,0.13396084227265964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35660252459846165,0.0,0.0,0.17189792259797754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22360807539520064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312790403198125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607157176995034,0.190693868447542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161197612188716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897388860976641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855363707941045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127606084551787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192510560937867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294952614947372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193816353282055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ComradeALat,2020/02/06,"Having specific intrusive thoughts. So I have bipolar and doctors think schizoaffective. There is one thing that I haven't talked about and that is the fact that I sometimes cannot look at something even a little sexual, it gives me intrusive thoughts about cheating and infidelity. This was weeks ago when I still had a relationship but it still continues, probably the thoughts are somehow linked to her.

This is a a very big problem for me. What is this crap? My life is a mess.",4.783295454545456,7.367424375000006,4.388636363636365,83.19045454545456,72.29545454545455,8.49090909090909,31.45454545454545,9.188382445141503,2.9949954545454545,387,18,70,9,8,117,62,88,0.156,0.8440000000000001,0.0,-0.9262,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,9,4,2,0,7,0,12,4,1,0,1,12,18,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,10,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,1,8,0,5,13,0,9,0,0,1,0,4,3,1,1,6,54,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902703274600615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21969881383798187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177136017999498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059075684958274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15161049847845767,0.0,0.2151312286509885,0.0,0.0,0.1802482005798688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454493784941159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23142420484221046,0.20538680106116364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23044898985476456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652446295954042,0.21228993558875808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3428324240365609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725239609708254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14260096451551027,0.1375362002445313,0.0,0.5112137672623825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17710505672069693,0.0,0.0,0.17217571150277264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jord264,2020/02/06,"Happiness I don’t know what will make me happy in life and I’m scared. I will be applying to residencies in about a year and I know I want to move somewhere different, preferably by the beach. I hate cities and I love nature so I want to apply for residencies and move by a beach or somewhere with a lot of nature. But who knows if that will make me happy since I’ll be starting over and literally all alone. It’s scary and I don’t know what to do or what will make me happy.",1.6221012101210128,3.3356193069306954,3.5074587458745903,89.90385038503851,78.70297029702971,6.865126512651265,21.123212321232124,7.793537801064563,0.6830387238723867,374,10,85,6,9,126,56,101,0.11,0.69,0.2,0.8658,1,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,1,1,4,0,9,2,0,3,1,23,22,11,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,5,2,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,11,5,13,16,2,7,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,4,2,56,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242084095543194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384616090863152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6677619769079007,0.0,0.15482977661237127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3447422344465951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107683873740424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333249029372572,0.1415384517943492,0.0,0.31404076004496034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33335505202385624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700670568159464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972521344244126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11099979052996088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18499597704278806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009885646297253
mentalhealth,AgeAndAsh,2020/02/06,"My Drug And Mental Health Based Discord Server Hello, I am here to tell you about a discord server I am trying to get people to join. Basically, I am gonna start this off by telling you what it is and informing you about the server and other things like that. This discord server is based around two main things, mental health and drug use. The purpose of the server is to act as a place for people that are living lives that could use help, guidance and things of the like. I want people to be assisted whenever there is a personal demand for it. If you are down to chat, or if you are seeking friendship then this little sub reddit should be able to help you out. As a simple little guideline remember that you can kind of do what you want as long as you do not do anything negative or cause a problem. So, I hope that you choose to join the server because we greatly appreciate the company. To join the server you just have to use the link to your right here -------> [https://discord.gg/cRAT83Z](https://discord.gg/cRAT83Z) and then correctly follow guidelines and you should be all good after that.",9.153414634146344,8.139661048780491,7.888902439024393,75.01579268292684,60.463414634146346,10.346341463414637,33.182926829268304,9.120678840339163,2.715575609756097,885,26,158,11,10,269,107,205,0.055,0.789,0.156,0.96,0,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,1,13,0,0,8,7,0,0,13,0,21,4,0,4,2,33,31,18,0,9,6,0,0,2,0,3,4,0,0,1,17,10,0,0,4,1,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,20,6,28,24,2,15,0,0,0,0,22,8,0,5,7,122,37,0,0.12954567650884544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660505375978796,0.11532311737122294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896984200029461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13307909477351307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343168146467673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004637134399722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768226917525243,0.0,0.0,0.1086567672026276,0.0,0.1428245656874155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754019925999303,0.0,0.0,0.17366347251643144,0.0,0.0,0.1286680869922014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490188705816708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657894787469615,0.2596776014644089,0.2287824114882539,0.11464384714562598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26110314490524755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694319823081438,0.11311428791784467,0.13534765956000966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395771689319925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14674999806413805,0.11063129991300316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169309660089857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226457262451112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581931735162489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795301074796646,0.0,0.12654730222612615,0.0,0.0,0.3356576126617831,0.0,0.0,0.15281879283531974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dontwantya2knowme,2020/02/06,"Can't Think Realistically Whats wrong with me? When i think about the past i think of it as a tragic backstory something that makes me into a cool protagonist. When i think about what i want in the future maybe acting. stuntswoman, singer come to mind i want to have created a long series comic and animation with my own art and story. I want to solve world problems the baddass route maybe with activism or joining some kind of group that destroys weapons and oilplants or something. I jump from job to job city to city country to country searching always unfulfilled because i keep treating my life like a story and dont know what i really want. I dont know how to treat my life realistically.


----------------- further info feel free to skip----

Id like to act but i dont know if im good enough and have only been in a few productions but i want to learn.  

id like to sing and have written about 30 songs that all need more work but i think id need a lot of training and arent particularly passionate about music.

Ive worked on an animation overseas before but i was heavily relying on references and that was for a very small amateurish animation

 i have lots of stories that i want to write ive only written a couple the rest are all in various stages of incompleteness.

Nowhere near fit enough to be a stuntswoman

I joined a group that travelled overseas as missionaries informing people of human traffickers and thats as far as ive gone activism wise that was an amazing time but we all split up again if i were to do that again id have to continually be saying hello goodbye over and over and i have doubts of my own faith so i shouldnt be a missionary.
---------------------------------------
overall everything i think i want is unrealistic.",3.3292115768463084,5.5011684880239535,4.650203592814371,81.55263073852295,75.19760479041916,7.567105788423152,27.600399201596804,8.447377352677275,2.0536789620758475,1361,55,263,26,30,450,168,334,0.067,0.805,0.128,0.9279999999999999,3,0,2,0,0,0,73.0,1,0,0,2,10,19,2,1,17,1,26,3,0,2,3,64,51,28,0,13,9,0,1,3,0,1,2,2,0,1,13,17,0,1,14,5,1,6,6,6,0,0,8,4,32,14,45,39,14,31,1,1,0,1,8,15,0,9,12,170,45,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695365970770194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370317395223389,0.0,0.08892312077994614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001883074133847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562897564593785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3674251092899802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21595606902993095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09391925339713364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05283912278784195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765094074989471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11287960482047148,0.0,0.2074033238537589,0.09288577776805083,0.0,0.10882228152006393,0.17229395413604934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476250682162269,0.15316253390355838,0.0,0.0,0.09248058185609488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17768695886644956,0.0,0.0,0.0697555950203309,0.0,0.2099717026476333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055167738344333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549731479985985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15895627314640765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975855253805062,0.07244821568385079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999386856997604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694636781580837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831038256673562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16090079487373274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4017622357369508,0.0,0.0,0.060935693247307535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622472171195511,0.431464045488765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215674367547238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425603824014267,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Uylimaz,2020/02/06,"Should I quit my job and move out or suck it up and start medication? I'm a teacher for adults. They don't take an exam before joining and they don't pay for anything. So any kind of person can show up. I also teach kids at weekends. I literally have no day off. My kids' classes are the most crowded. 30 kids in one class. It's a bit soul crushing.

I live in an apartment building that my mom and aunt owns. They're in their 70s and choose really bad tenants basically for nothing. We live by the sea and the rents are expensive around here. But they take 1/7th of the required rent from some tenants. With some months free. You'd think tenants would really be nice not to lose the apartment but no. They want more and more. The worst one is the pub on the entrance floor. They ruin my life and try to obtain the whole building.

I earn lower than the minimum wage. About two dollars an hour and I'm really stressed lately because I feel like I can't deal with people anymore.
I have a boyfriend ten years younger than me. He's really nice but in another city. I visited him and he visited me a couple of times in the 3 years we've been talking. We call each other every day and talk for hours on discord, messenger, etc.

My mom lives downstairs but my aunt lives elsewhere so she doesn't really know what's going on in the building. Mom lives with my brother and acts like he's mentally challenged and refuses to leave him or let him do anything. He's 30. She also doesn't want me to leave to live in another city.

My father lives in my childhood home 20 minutes away. Mom and dad aren't divorced. She goes to stay with him and comes back to stay with my brother every week, back and forth. My father also feels that adult children shouldn't get away from their families ever and they should live around each other at all times. So he doesn't want me to go as well. But he's worried about me and wants me to be happy so he thinks I should start using medication.

I've been using medication (prozac and trazodone and such) for 10 years but then I quit to try and see if I'll be any different. It's been more than a year. And now I feel like I can't take this anymore.
I'm not happy with my job but people tell me no one is, so I should accept it and live one day at a time.
What do you think? I have nobody that I can talk to.",1.7217200689842969,3.7601838810020887,2.9808990650812426,92.2377859217573,79.7098121085595,5.918870835980758,21.895298175546884,6.98899656878771,0.5070838340746122,1825,55,395,21,46,589,216,479,0.085,0.828,0.087,0.1674,7,0,0,0,1,0,47.0,2,2,8,7,19,18,1,1,21,0,33,5,0,2,2,77,60,43,0,11,12,11,3,3,0,6,5,0,6,7,12,37,0,2,9,3,7,7,14,6,1,6,3,4,54,13,56,46,14,58,1,2,1,0,55,25,1,6,27,248,66,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214710518120755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625342471220457,0.13299952299619386,0.0,0.0,0.1257880983385469,0.0,0.0,0.1043759412743087,0.11291171010927613,0.0,0.0,0.1191674196783673,0.09752972803034764,0.052951746500894716,0.03865929100151781,0.0,0.05396441950557634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923650875182584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475731551193678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054629368637977335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017129509207087,0.0,0.12269893754635157,0.06538162458840667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662587694842451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072832195751882,0.0,0.057365607685978474,0.10686553797689904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978525897990935,0.0,0.09619880285643824,0.09061228914831504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03313351620583692,0.0,0.07208431926215324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502021241424622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361386385003108,0.0,0.12490877295275955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12586602761043955,0.0,0.0,0.06604054378652695,0.034853114831934366,0.0,0.07153876005358836,0.13430193727823092,0.0,0.06484964929270996,0.04479431806309474,0.09294913583344087,0.0,0.5039967814262793,0.0,0.0,0.07094900999333245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19166221211507994,0.06391086903951118,0.0,0.0,0.2970996310893121,0.05061999193576109,0.06740376285280916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06085170139086725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718958987070579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793271916915213,0.05537453364828961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490662967630196,0.0,0.0,0.20313737560600972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050536284044883084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977579325310535,0.13519123302199962,0.0,0.0,0.07264560613232783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14304831791588685,0.15292001395926114,0.055430509842428005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219079224876716,0.0,0.0,0.11093940308499857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611391262382352,0.0,0.0619505985867185,0.0,0.0,0.10954633647545443,0.0,0.0,0.14962335071404226,0.0,0.050870445392610486,0.0,0.05702079175266219,0.0,0.0,0.07080442090419227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644045019023258,0.0,0.04505063858783152,0.0,0.0,0.16335757852946434
mentalhealth,takingastepbackwards,2020/02/06,"taking big steps today. today i told my fiancé about my eating disorder, and how this time it’s gotten out of control, and he had us set up a plan to make sure i start eating more, while he wished i came to him earlier he was happy i did them rather than later. 

today i also called and set up my first counseling appointment, by myself. it’s in march, and.. i’m so, so happy i did. i’ve been putting it off, i didn’t know if i actually wanted to get better, but a friend talked some sense into me and i really thought it over. 

i never thought i’d be able to say any of that, it’s been surprisingly good today, but i feel like i deserve a break from the dark times.",1.5813829787234042,3.073779000000002,3.80526595744681,88.70875000000002,78.14893617021276,6.68581560283688,19.551418439716308,7.492282038375204,0.4182524822695033,513,11,114,7,12,177,94,141,0.013999999999999999,0.8190000000000001,0.16699999999999998,0.9620000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,1,4,6,8,0,0,4,0,8,2,0,3,2,24,22,13,0,4,4,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,7,8,2,1,4,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,12,2,20,8,17,9,2,26,0,0,0,0,11,8,0,2,13,74,27,0,0.14276276772093055,0.0,0.1393158675188024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416733376766085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708357759413708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626206655590158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577674767739532,0.1632825738374684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601205833635597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636185001943411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921639042850908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218514490091607,0.10198974978518258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143393729302986,0.0,0.0,0.1102981602028338,0.0,0.07458765381824455,0.0,0.0,0.1197426362306794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039472418036189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845868357050158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974667708250817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952952560247804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010744751184116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143516012900566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145748465162062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353068296960615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104822178880754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455221904902018,0.0,0.10733983428047957,0.11474730493655624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266753816290366,0.16649223585168146,0.0,0.5412896439486499,0.1364159425213539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17172603165231728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420517925757287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417013732164276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thesecretman11,2020/02/06,"I Don't Feel Normal Hi everyone Im a 19 y/o male college student. Im looking for some possibly answers or advice to help me out. These past couple of months nearly everyday/night mostly when Im about to fall asleep, I get this rush of anxiety and an emptiness feeling. my brain starts to think of things i regret a lot (like not reaching out to my old baseball coach enough before he passed) or a huge feeling of loneliness. normally this feeling every once in a while is normal for me but i feel its been getting worse. feel free to ask questions about this because I dont really know how to describe this anymore than I just did. also sorry for my horrible writing skills lol",3.641506105834463,5.46531137313433,4.747476255088195,82.72269335142471,73.32835820895522,7.260786974219811,29.34599728629579,8.00094639256281,2.127322388059701,540,23,99,8,11,177,96,134,0.138,0.7490000000000001,0.113,-0.5181,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,5,1,5,2,2,1,0,27,18,8,0,4,5,0,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,10,1,1,3,3,1,0,0,2,7,11,3,20,16,4,14,0,1,1,0,7,5,0,6,7,62,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204409371381584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806064744541173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337143537303008,0.0,0.13400922085768416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632507676167065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237188628260378,0.0,0.11498273537001848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508459107790318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495149494438519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583673017742218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962184029880512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384994025649355,0.12911920235198818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4099442407830003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119608292572428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057247328361254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4378795621173788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426201405033303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601600329950769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347226345009465,0.0,0.0,0.11487975450503922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785671726869296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268071066808197,0.3971859655435801,0.0,0.0,0.1417925759218904,0.14390535801290918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899357497544753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523348738541242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15137265308146805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656552342104698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15126310167497842,0.09564326247583024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977207074292867,0.0865836324460676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377054912815851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ActualJackfruit3,2020/02/06,"Others see me as successful, but it is impossible to see myself that way I hope this is right place to post this. Some triggers for suicidal ideation. 

I have struggled with mental health all my life, but things are progressively getting worse. Today, after what felt like a particularly devastating midterm, I overheard classmates discussing their plans for the night: watching the Bachelor, yoga, spending time with a partner. I can’t relate. I go home, I study, without retaining anything it feels like, and just repeat. I don’t know what is wrong with me; it is as though my brain is... faulty? That’s what it feels like anyways. I put the time in, I go to office hours, I can explain the content to my peers, but I go into the exam and if I feel so stressed that I start shaking, I can’t concentrate and I second guess everything. It doesn’t help that a recent accident has left me with chronic pain which has made everything more difficult.

You know what’s a  hard to swallow pill? That no matter how badly I want something, or how hard I try, I’ll never obtain what I want. My anxiety is barrier to... essentially every imaginable goal. *Well*, you might be thinking, *just get some student support for the test anxiety/general anxiety disorder.* But is that conducive to any sort of legitimate, long-term solution? There are no freebies or modifications in the work force. You are merely left behind in a lower, unsatisfying position if you are not equipped. And I am not. 

I just wish I had a better brain. I wish I could see myself as something other than ugly and shameful. If I can’t obsesses over my grades because I am actually doing well, then it’s my body. I don’t think I have every felt fully secure in myself. What kind of life is that? I struggle with suicidal thinking and, although I would never have the guts to act on it as my foolish optimism always causes me to waver, I can’t stop. And they feel... proper? Like a logical response to the abyss that I perceive my life to be. Not to be dramatic, but that’s the best metaphor I got rn. I can’t imagine myself as successful. Or desirable. Or likeable, or valuable, or anything less than a disappointment. I go the counsellors and what do they say? Oh you have a 90% average though, why be upset about one exam? Or, you have been accepted into one of the top graduate programs, why can’t you just feel better? I know I sound like a bitch complaining when others have it worse off. Believe me, I feel guilty. But I genuinely believe I have failed. If my average drops below a 90%? May as well have no degree at all. Got into grad school? What’s that worth if you can barely function as an undergrad? The higher the level of achievement, the greater the fall as you fail. 

That’s pretty much it. I thought about killing myself today over a midterm worth 20% because I may have gotten below an 80% on it. Ridiculous? Perhaps. Unwavering? Of course.

I wish someone understood. I want to fix myself but I don’t know how. I am scared what will happen when I get my grade back. I am scared of myself and beyond ashamed. I have three tests next week but I just want to curl up and disappear. Please help me. I just want someone to tell me that I’m wrong.",2.4979689578713997,5.078780773983741,3.834985218034,84.16436252771621,80.28455284552845,6.719142645971915,25.903547671840357,7.898369717300924,1.798365853658536,2516,102,467,46,66,823,285,615,0.22699999999999998,0.62,0.153,-0.996,1,0,2,0,0,1,105.0,0,9,3,14,23,41,3,10,30,0,54,12,4,6,4,104,100,48,3,17,30,0,10,5,1,5,7,2,1,1,38,18,1,4,23,1,3,9,19,22,3,4,10,16,86,19,61,80,9,54,0,3,4,0,20,23,1,20,24,342,124,21,0.0,0.0,0.06910004916216897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058919339763719124,0.0,0.0,0.04815302164836841,0.0,0.1083384477016175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165406933468568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05444828562894495,0.05912313868311163,0.08632986725885942,0.0,0.0,0.15955655915835845,0.07431040765022645,0.1252508441675151,0.0,0.07865360968009016,0.0,0.15809407847499796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274106352323521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05653578065391635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115404661815305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193204462509424,0.0,0.12727837838826242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21482106023960554,0.10117292236280667,0.1359768257723406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098543125468333,0.0,0.1609711288575522,0.0,0.1132659654315168,0.0,0.07800486362439654,0.0,0.0626167805808189,0.0,0.12686315887659388,0.0,0.0,0.07526739595062339,0.0,0.0,0.0949244936440431,0.0,0.07102789885335359,0.07033000566498969,0.06973328732319077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834043762079684,0.0737374022013224,0.15566062900018246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538698844212044,0.0,0.15004494775342378,0.17297020436845745,0.0,0.0,0.06266435296964339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067001846740906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135951924677987,0.07511789780519393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052053274244707466,0.0,0.1092256061236142,0.0,0.07530691532793812,0.06645010319222927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09596496555730953,0.0,0.07534650931239041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398106155239198,0.07772778277890066,0.0,0.0,0.06781611544241611,0.07203891767707768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118330254555656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991603254563661,0.0,0.0,0.060471093738094325,0.0,0.0563107125866738,0.14178571768484358,0.07166319299953297,0.16927848055385253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11999365176875455,0.10902552731289156,0.0,0.0,0.050119467492918485,0.0,0.0,0.0592000767507103,0.08111226786462561,0.14805133800123926,0.0,0.15490862973533973,0.08035400422239751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06189079562529785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04704281582311357,0.13611598264632965,0.1391403341782195,0.056214989338188234,0.08257940669190413,0.0,0.13423862505387846,0.0,0.0,0.048075135713584516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20882696745301635,0.05620544099869467,0.05679926719259671,0.0,0.1909992626148702,0.0,0.1277894743245759,0.0,0.2442829685216117,0.06825802037821742,0.0,0.05155030224197799,0.0,0.1443222599318565,0.05030117661834058,0.15483857401188078,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,corduroybin,2020/02/06,"Stopping meds after a week? Stopping after a week on meds

I’ve been on Effexor XR 75mg (1 tablet a day) for 8 days now. 

I went to my doctor and asked for Effexor specifically since I had heard good things about it (my dad is on them too) and I haven’t had any problems with them but I want to stop them as I now have an opening to see a psychiatrist who can actually diagnose me and give me the proper medication I need. 

Is it a bad idea to stop cold turkey even though it has only been a week? Or should I try wean off them?",1.8121140609636202,3.0205573893805315,4.030560471976403,88.52827925270407,76.87610619469027,7.500098328416913,22.29006882989184,8.167268648758528,0.9074747295968536,407,11,96,7,9,141,74,113,0.14400000000000002,0.8240000000000001,0.032,-0.8988,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,4,0,6,3,0,0,8,0,11,3,0,0,0,16,18,7,0,4,2,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,5,0,4,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,6,3,15,1,15,11,0,19,0,0,1,0,9,5,0,1,13,64,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.155419034982743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108305221875151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14889067153576466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297908280376194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054246649589952,0.0,0.0,0.16164996644517973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16301381454783404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051926035140954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278088032613368,0.0,0.13358338357796998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179790069523447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3538135866068678,0.16044208082146869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809250018464384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112771766152805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15239447730222191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269130698169775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13174511911436956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5326085240782722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580815971549347,0.0,0.15647641881125154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813004172738536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393824216753058,0.0,0.3832567734105182,0.0,0.0,0.14763965141541052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway2189_0,2020/02/06,"Why is my body so tense all day, and the only way to unwind is vigorously exercise? And when I do exercise I start to almost shake. Is this anxiety? Something else? Anyone have experience with this?",2.128378378378379,4.991638054054056,4.517621621621622,75.85372972972975,87.37837837837839,8.365405405405406,23.616216216216216,8.841846274778883,2.6941718918918918,156,6,27,5,5,54,30,37,0.18100000000000002,0.7809999999999999,0.038,-0.6891,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,5,3,1,0,1,5,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,3,6,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3435097139530618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624282562453661,0.0,0.0,0.2398648301523548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810453273725748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22123545186713414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865698279879364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355635413334448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26090095223795945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264092569405778,0.0,0.0,0.24280880402380986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27229291513227083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3095444842063188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rachelseaturtle,2020/02/06,"Finding a provider sucks Looking for treatment providers really sucks. Over the summer I moved about 50 miles away for a new job... I became eligible for their insurance in September. It is cheaper with a lower deductible than anything I’ve had before but it seems like they accomplished that by participating in a more limited network. The center and psychiatrist I’ve been using since 2013 isn’t in network. In fact, it doesn’t seem like ANY eating disorder treatment centers are in-network... I just need an outpatient psychiatrist for depression/med management atm but it sucks to know I’d have to fight for options if things get worse and I need a higher level of care. (I have out of network benefits I think but the difference in coverage % could be huge if you consider that a single day of a day program/PHP can run upwards of $800 depending on where you go.)

There are so many results when I search my insurance website but that doesn’t show me specialties or ratings so then I have to google it all too, and so many seem to be primarily for kids/adolescents for some reason. Great for them I guess but just more to weed out. It’s exhausting and disheartening and I’m not even to the stage of calling anyone. Cuz that’s a whole other issue, figuring out if your personalities fit. 

I’ve procrastinated for 4 months but I’m about to run out of meds so I need to get my shit together. 


Just a vent I guess thanks for reading, if anyone did.",3.5530963621216323,5.960345732851987,4.7101263537906135,80.26899958344906,75.42599277978339,8.304859761177452,28.34337683976673,9.057496981413335,2.630330297139683,1156,49,214,28,26,379,162,277,0.11800000000000001,0.765,0.11699999999999999,0.39399999999999996,2,0,0,0,1,0,30.0,0,3,3,2,14,13,5,0,14,0,16,3,1,5,2,48,38,23,0,8,15,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,12,10,1,1,8,2,1,4,4,7,0,0,3,1,20,6,41,32,6,31,0,1,1,0,9,19,4,13,9,140,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129771557060734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18774784244313397,0.0,0.11048007694386526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261365936875006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142407559906642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13708893281517032,0.0,0.1368814879879187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719135466503776,0.0,0.0,0.17316619003129208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14026745745146266,0.15386737554400165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737594809767914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867388136494837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227062503784435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402849497748269,0.0,0.07629996952649358,0.0,0.0,0.1480161441705668,0.29579310325774644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012689707131176,0.13322695101234794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378280399399413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118000889696052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127400310907088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722261362632999,0.0,0.0,0.14912656857989207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10716072182310987,0.14269136767281765,0.0,0.2986442012548938,0.0,0.1296639062431808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722591745765715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13429090734942714,0.0,0.0860069192694347,0.13803606435485444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666609716452853,0.0,0.0,0.13781039313243934,0.11105677274346773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236035760518502,0.0,0.0,0.08919277485890888,0.08602491143758023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159528482806194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14989043976911992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13681688279070178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gambaguice,2020/02/06,"What do I do when weed fixes my PTSD and my job has a zero tolerance policy Had PTSD. Couldn’t have sex anymore. Weed made me feel ok in my own body. Could have sex again. 

Got hired to dream job. Had a horrible massage that triggered physical repulsion and PTSD again a month ago. Can’t have sex anymore. Can’t smoke weed to fix it and I’m super stressed out. Nothing else has ever worked eg. a decade of medication, therapy, etc. My job does random hair testing and smoking is not an option. What can I do to substitute weed because I’m at a total loss and the stress just keeps getting worse.",0.7725315126050454,3.2957837058823536,2.3828939075630267,91.22543329831936,90.0924369747899,5.6640756302521025,21.723214285714285,7.1686216300943375,0.9117432773109244,467,17,95,8,16,152,80,119,0.115,0.8009999999999999,0.084,-0.5859,3,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,5,5,0,2,7,1,16,6,2,2,2,18,23,6,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,1,1,0,0,4,3,0,1,4,2,7,2,7,17,3,9,0,1,0,3,0,3,0,2,6,56,11,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184927416194342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950207586662182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067068754048263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16521690797578914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875700184173404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301636119104722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425340897311915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16588471786047662,0.0,0.13454408902276685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520754924710632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771065162315073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896118095279755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4428052985107717,0.13220718545792814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074163909609272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14984017293817614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11872306380189293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272029983429996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.521608245181478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3407629516306783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17009746066086928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828468745780813,0.0,0.15157904154051358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,exactlyyodasphynx,2020/02/06,"How to help my schizophrenic cousin...? All the kids in my family have really struggled. The key for the rest of us was acknowledging that we were the problem. Understanding there was a problem but also a way out. And making a dedicated effort to find the path that leads us there.

He is so stuck. Can’t keep a job, can’t show up on time, lives with his parents he seems to hate and believes are poisoning him with their farts, doesn’t have any friends and says he’s suffering from eternal loneliness, won’t sleep in his bed because he was once forced to take psych meds (that truly helped him) and farted on the bed and now gets headaches if he goes anywhere near it.

Super smart kid, really, and very intuitive. Handsome and kind (when he’s not threatening to kill his parents or all of the people, throwing things and breaking things and punching holes in the wall). He truly has so much potential and it kills me to see him living the same misery day in and day out.

To him, the problem is the world. Feels devalued if he makes less than $20/hour but never went to college or learned any trades, thinks his parents are the problem for a number of reasons, but mainly the farts that are poisoning him so they can “own his body”. Throws away pretty much anything they touch. Takes his underwear with him when he leaves the house because he thinks they fart on them when he’s gone. 

Can’t make any concrete plans or tell me what he wants in his life and how to get there. Wants a farm and a G Wagon but won’t get a job; thinks they’ll just magically appear one day.

His parents are going insane and constantly have to vacate their house because they can’t stand all the insanity and fighting and threats. He is 26 years old, but they’re scared to kick him out because they don’t think he’ll make it. They have before, but always pick him up when he falls.

I don’t know what we can do. Seems there’s no way to force him to take the meds he so desperately needs. Seems the government won’t intervene until he does kill someone. I know for me, it had to get bad. Really bad. And looking back the worst things that happened to me were undoubtedly the best.

I see it like this. I start walking down the wrong path and Spirit pushes me a little. Don’t get the message and next time I get a shove. And on and on until eventually it grabs me, picks me up, and slams me to the ground. And in that moment I wake up. And this is my window of grace and I need to keep riding this wave. There were plenty of times I hopped off, lured by one of my old demons, and it was incredibly hard to get back on until the cycle repeated itself and I finally knew to stay on. To dedicate all my efforts to riding that wave to freedom, because it was the only thing that mattered, because everything else is gone if I fall off course. And I am grateful to say I finally made it, and I don’t think I could ever go back to that dark place of loneliness and desperation.

But I am not schizophrenic. And I don’t know if my path will work for him. And it’s scary as hell to watch a loved one visit the dark and dangerous places I frequented. And I don’t know if I’d have made it if I didn’t.

My aunt is scared he’ll just continue to get worse. But I can’t think of anything else to do. I cannot reason with him and he seems to trust me more than anyone. He refuses to make any changes or join support groups or do therapy. 

Does anyone have experience with schizophrenia and are you willing to share your story? How did you finally realize that treating your illness was the only way to heal and find freedom? Or did you find another way? How can we best support him on this journey?

Are there any places he could go? I’m thinking WOOF or a service mission in a third world country could help. He did outward bound once and it was great for him. I wish I could get him to go to the psych hospital/trauma recovery center I spent six months at (inpatient then outpatient) but it’s expensive as hell and he doesn’t want to go and we’d lose a $25k deposit if he walked.

Is there any good support for people like him I could look into? Are there any good books/films on this issue, which might enable him to recognize the problem and see how much better life is on the other side? He’s super spiritual and I’ve tried to use some quantum physics type principles and you are the universe/you create your reality type lessons, but he doesn’t seem to grasp the concept.

I’m just feeling very sad for everyone involved and concerned about what might happen if he continues down this path. And I’m desperately hoping one of you can help. 

Thank you very much in advance for reading this and for any assistance you’re able to provide. There has to be a way out. Firmly believe there’s always a way out, even from the darkest depths of hell. It may seem like the only thing to look forward to is lifetimes of digging your way back to the surface, but there is always light on the other side. And there is balance in all things, which means those of us who’ve lived in the darkest of places and hit the lowest of lows get to look forward to the same magnitude of light and the highest of highs.",4.072624135763668,5.2095994302325614,4.6217871359731815,86.76591137649278,71.17054263565892,7.787680703959774,26.73664362036455,8.142894201729593,1.5133319296040226,4060,132,843,57,74,1292,402,1032,0.149,0.71,0.141,-0.9226,7,0,0,0,2,0,101.0,7,10,10,14,38,53,12,3,55,0,82,12,3,18,8,179,167,95,3,25,31,6,5,3,1,11,8,2,3,2,46,63,0,4,32,2,4,24,23,28,0,6,23,17,92,25,123,125,20,126,5,4,8,1,102,57,3,27,42,538,138,14,0.04286641814220549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034280259101111425,0.1070048815544264,0.0,0.0,0.2332050743105,0.04494917701395303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059946392517792324,0.0,0.07055081935100073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04027441092079896,0.13184651826109933,0.0715833372345192,0.15678582376668,0.0,0.03647616457813593,0.09659154805219124,0.08997132238482165,0.037911863344260034,0.0,0.04761492701376505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04534698651024666,0.0,0.0,0.04632336943768578,0.0,0.17112673407180434,0.0,0.0,0.08293588035428907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502538277587653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716187837183534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028312864900108693,0.03877512935837857,0.0,0.040960699534869666,0.03852557258361635,0.041931582363821655,0.04041064401095446,0.0,0.043349098008901965,0.0,0.0,0.14087419734246204,0.1175373887739984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03311848832192018,0.0,0.22395934233139564,0.0,0.12180986643604562,0.07190863550849699,0.0,0.04726037733353152,0.0,0.0,0.07581326398926477,0.0,0.03839989083281559,0.04232171325346865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149298259816252,0.04529072429690989,0.0,0.042576025439094986,0.04221478708769455,0.09892418236127262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04474140349538986,0.08507661121862302,0.07620328407546549,0.14227602145835982,0.04463877803295982,0.09423304942909204,0.0,0.0,0.04538934739043221,0.0,0.0,0.0605556376888654,0.06282709991359689,0.04296341239060295,0.1135554977062624,0.0,0.1439879802246728,0.04795655709601738,0.0,0.0,0.0386886159900441,0.08112248262556929,0.14306833486557094,0.0,0.0,0.04669409607795537,0.0952298540275301,0.0,0.0,0.0909489910499851,0.0,0.0,0.03421556599162412,0.0,0.12604699843123088,0.06356981178806667,0.033061224302122695,0.0,0.045588922003146494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08996218986512841,0.0913026726258096,0.11618957729911865,0.09780552789578456,0.0,0.0,0.19039233779340084,0.0,0.0,0.05943635390881141,0.0,0.1791451332263364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043610558006124935,0.0,0.20508686462933368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04287801840374035,0.0,0.08238397535779765,0.08814763448409428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817819247744665,0.08583352533490977,0.0,0.10247695597641507,0.23414386275955004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042897375756730236,0.0,0.03632057698510601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030341071393296393,0.0456898981811712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04481328753945109,0.0,0.0,0.14593290995321198,0.0,0.0,0.09669063495413344,0.0,0.037467138870148665,0.03946563854043362,0.049021484990996914,0.0,0.1708712607889284,0.1922694891279624,0.0,0.0,0.07498725942396944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02910348409297002,0.0,0.0,0.04462545305146737,0.15468906906665286,0.037022822026257764,0.0,0.10610785290540103,0.0758511721526106,0.23817757217628815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03973759907809053,0.0,0.0,0.049294265341292325,0.0,0.0,0.031207262944101637,0.0,0.04368454226746366,0.0,0.04686769895544552,0.0,0.027604567852855238
mentalhealth,woshuwa,2020/02/06,"i don't know why i want to kill myself things are so good right now. my family is healthy, i am surrounded by beautiful people who care about me, i have the most amazing boyfriend who i love more than anything in the world. a few months ago i traveled across the world to meet my best friend of six years for the first time. im taking classes on a subject im very passionate about. the other day, i got the job id been trying to get for months. i should be happy right? dont get me wrong, i am. and im so incredibly grateful for how lucky i am to have such a well laid out life. things are good. so good. i should be happy. but im not, and i feel so, so, guilty. every night after i finish my day, i sit in bed, and try to write in my journal. i dont feel like i can talk to any of my friends, or my boyfriend, or my parents. they would be so disappointed in me. they are all such kind people, i dont want them to think i am ungrateful for the amount of love and support they have given me. but yet, i think of the big picture, and i feel like all i really am is a burden. i go about my life, with everything laid out for me, but here i am, sitting at home in bed and seriously considering suicide. i dont understand. im angry at myself and im frustrated that everything would be so perfect if only i wanted to be alive. im so tired. it has been years that i have had these suicidal thoughts and ive only acted on them once. but lately, they have been consistent, theyre not just 'intrusive in the moment thoughts' anymore, but a constant longing, almost a craving. im just exhausted, i dont think i can do this. i think my place in the universe is not here.",1.5423931623931608,3.045553481481484,3.462458689458689,91.07744871794874,78.28774928774928,6.731282051282051,23.096011396011395,7.554174236665415,0.8219522507122505,1276,40,293,18,30,431,164,351,0.149,0.6709999999999999,0.18,0.7132,2,0,0,0,0,2,47.0,0,0,6,3,21,27,2,0,16,0,41,7,0,1,3,50,65,25,3,8,13,1,3,2,2,4,4,0,3,0,10,11,0,0,11,1,0,3,9,7,1,2,8,3,52,20,38,48,7,44,0,1,0,3,16,21,0,6,20,201,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06214670152945415,0.0,0.07020324910431774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04767598956100815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952850954379626,0.0,0.0,0.05769308642779284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357424514867382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147999653244623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576207282012451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904279961075976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4108315227251343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05906919394815919,0.0,0.1260174840883833,0.0,0.06609178458800409,0.0,0.10634645838279562,0.10017064402830256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596340109234318,0.0,0.0,0.10833086428710836,0.0,0.0732572962995848,0.0,0.03984411360037877,0.1764103306578051,0.056071943158249114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14926299469418888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703242548100316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6058312130833398,0.0,0.06957158441491759,0.0,0.07756435127764143,0.07300691622797098,0.0385296408679481,0.0,0.07908511897127593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903900963906427,0.06850266401186847,0.0,0.0,0.06204356311935156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655080049349654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11191941491761682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579180947885505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466295971252378,0.0,0.10664091172698506,0.0,0.0,0.07784687478153575,0.0,0.0,0.09720841613344924,0.0,0.07324816174653602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044913117043907234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974406320139275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15337401395292036,0.07955797030697935,0.0,0.0,0.052712651773409086,0.05635032667604796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315356417219504,0.17969005047066552,0.0,0.11131618133668908,0.04088066331690805,0.08057907853624917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519775041999123,0.0,0.0,0.07298512316260435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057846618788673226,0.12405492298759208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06303570394870779,0.0,0.06326175840422707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996057272947352,0.07665232612128241,0.0,0.09029478231929614
mentalhealth,violeddit,2020/02/06,"It was my birthday yesterday I turned 23 yesterday. Which means, technically, it's been 10 years since I started showing symptoms of depression.

I didn't get professional help until around 3 years ago. And those 7 years of being untreated were... painful. And even when I did get help, it took a long while before I stopped being so self-destructive to myself and to the people around me.

10 years later, and here we are now. I'm a cum laude psychology graduate, about to take the Psychometrician Licensure Exam, and about to enroll for MA in Clinical Psychology. I discovered new hobbies that I love (D&D, video games, knitting). 

Most of all... I finally knew what it meant to be happy. I have dreams and aspirations, I look forward to what the future may bring. And, I feel so loved. I'm so much more emotionally stable than before.

Looking back, it really was a team effort, between my therapist, my medication, my parents, my family, my friends, my orgs, my teachers, and myself. I was able to improve this much because it tackled the biological, psychological, social, and environmental aspects of my life. 

I want to thank everyone for being so patient with me, for listening to me, for comforting me in your own small ways. Thank you for not judging me for having a mental illness, and for taking the time to help me become a better person.

To those who were there with me during at least one of my many, many depressive suicidal episodes for the past 10 years, thank you so much for your unconditional love. Thank you for giving me a safe space to talk about my thoughts and feelings and for giving me comfort and advice when I needed it. Most of all, thank you for not giving up on me.

And lastly, I would like to thank myself, because you were there through ALL of your episodes, and you survived. You didn't give up, and you still kept on living. So, congrats! You made it to 10 years.

There were times when no one was there to help, but, you were able to pull yourself out of that hole anyway. It was rough, and painful, and I wish you didn't have to go through so much suffering. But despite all that, you decided you wanted to become better. No one else could have decided that for you. It was you.

You also decided you'd spend the rest of your life helping other people who suffer from mental illness. That's inspiring, and I am proud of you. I know it took a long, long while and I'm sorry, but now I can finally say that I genuinely do love you. 

So, here's to celebrating life, no matter how hard it gets. To celebrating growth, and healing.",4.639138828269264,6.3285791138716325,5.429859548989985,79.38389289911032,70.49068322981367,8.451435286217897,28.582004364613066,8.994212911058018,2.3655260365956026,2004,75,372,39,37,652,226,483,0.087,0.7440000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.9896,1,0,0,0,0,0,88.0,1,23,0,6,30,26,0,0,14,0,32,15,0,2,4,62,76,40,1,6,5,2,4,1,1,2,11,2,0,1,27,27,0,3,11,5,1,7,8,6,0,3,23,8,68,20,64,45,14,54,0,4,2,4,49,14,0,3,35,277,95,6,0.14011361005666914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845869906669684,0.062101130671882436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05602440167033264,0.0,0.07590651897877652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473081876080765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053869358718289184,0.0,0.08541195620303503,0.15474447414032286,0.11922636230321793,0.0,0.0,0.12391910188337645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05593465824101737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12067964703132512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058523471108297725,0.07880447626870897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0462718589997508,0.0,0.0,0.06694227942299724,0.0,0.0,0.06604332088473429,0.0,0.07084565118758394,0.0,0.0,0.15348761111792794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054125713781472566,0.0,0.10980536741792747,0.268819484113686,0.03981489675730796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745767716536583,0.06275713674651995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347879983821083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03850138789984085,0.05710564645530292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14844957965213287,0.03422621623093619,0.0,0.061861442340186576,0.1859942036729626,0.11766014393318047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529160069534259,0.06628944282049086,0.0,0.14205320889676942,0.0,0.07631239853200701,0.0,0.07057486071635105,0.1412015638643326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20599925014050186,0.05194623324195681,0.0,0.06766129884794922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241691251469285,0.0,0.14909075984432332,0.0,0.07778979132005243,0.0,0.06687714749226678,0.09713713526451542,0.06117089993380258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04488018320816794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055711983232791314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730845264660054,0.0,0.0,0.05795171306648598,0.0,0.0,0.07141409026489626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842285759411469,0.04958656717945182,0.0,0.055947454991692264,0.058570625939762214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663077402142766,0.0,0.0,0.07281584469599664,0.10534799740869416,0.05630900617716586,0.0,0.3869933618489589,0.0,0.08134135026567227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05561727777143868,0.08170137278784828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15567137622126653,0.0,0.07620168655284236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264263742988316,0.05560783095563169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056186837382975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049766344264197085,0.0,0.0,0.2706857132140239
mentalhealth,M1n3cr4f7G4m352015,2020/02/06,"Something’s wrong with me Over the past year, I’ve been well aware that something’s up with my mental health, but I don’t know what it is, or what to do about it. 2018 was my last year of high school, where I had a few friends I spoke to daily and that I was close to. Since finishing high school I now almost never talk to them, and I’ve been struggling to make any new friends at my job recruitment agency (having autism probably doesn’t help). Along with basically isolating myself, my fear of heights has been getting much worse, I get stressed much easier than normal, I’m slowly losing motivation to do anything, I’ve lost interest in some stuff, like playing games and using social media, recently I’ve been waking up at 3-4 AM for no reason, and I think I might have social anxiety. I should also mention that about 6 months ago, I developed some symptoms of depression, which went away after about a week, when I lowered the dosage of my medication.

I don’t know what to do about it, who to talk to about it (I don’t feel comfortable talking to anyone about it anyway), or if anything will ever change.",7.448723936613844,6.3874946146789,7.349182652210177,77.67092160133446,63.86238532110092,10.49608006672227,32.66221851542952,9.573946990214177,2.7671321100917416,878,28,172,14,11,281,135,218,0.149,0.722,0.129,-0.5789,2,0,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,1,3,13,14,0,3,4,0,22,4,1,4,2,29,34,10,0,3,4,0,1,1,2,3,3,1,0,0,14,9,0,0,6,2,0,1,6,7,1,0,10,2,21,7,34,21,5,28,0,3,0,0,13,12,0,7,16,117,35,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066432023754289,0.0,0.12046816834029585,0.0,0.0,0.09620793600134454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181158578132641,0.0,0.09203306359754627,0.0,0.0,0.08412011528052099,0.0,0.19800167475231928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303059107375454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12726683200274289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361859664806343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088228403627729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353766716394977,0.060829867631036025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858948262636247,0.0,0.12570888691575582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787868361237367,0.0,0.0,0.08063796506082542,0.2542178629256845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938423719596655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322330610446245,0.09806470423041597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05877498951421713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459062145154202,0.1313272158205816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080304580919107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12119472016955132,0.12123923339232352,0.1276246874989363,0.0,0.0,0.09602637405576753,0.0,0.17687616541148413,0.0,0.09278670101071644,0.11619140437475553,0.0,0.0,0.11787344377749395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484482000805775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12970923338922066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369366801023828,0.1187867614179342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24351034517659165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995176126052443,0.0,0.0,0.2452717751892624,0.0,0.18523346977572688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378090726846337,0.12576899978756514,0.1377205438684245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250430511979209,0.0,0.29009001976334303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708664315881725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390496995910667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650148549714233,0.0,0.1081687228387117,0.11152402254824473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260116337860215,0.0,0.13153472872932848,0.0,0.15494506558418425
mentalhealth,dddopp,2020/02/06,"Confidentiality in school therapist I self harm, have an Ed, Severe depression, bad anxiety, am suicidal and have abusive parents. If I told this to them what would happen? Like I cannot tell my parents about my problems but I can’t have child protective services called on them. Would they tell my parents? What would they do? What would happen to me?",3.24984375,6.3170067968750025,3.7550000000000026,82.39000000000001,82.59375,6.95,26.75,8.07648339933343,2.2049437500000004,281,12,49,6,8,88,45,64,0.264,0.711,0.025,-0.9247,3,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,4,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,11,0,0,0,0,8,14,3,1,6,2,3,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,12,1,5,9,0,2,0,1,0,0,13,2,0,1,1,36,16,2,0.0,0.19264807406556012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243844631705673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357597422165768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16602731810535318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14004253487548293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875638262591824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943553363116047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5416263553240537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558112236576746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16455446758635034,0.0,0.0,0.1696216818369879,0.18368567519308568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17785215829551465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842297836961543,0.0,0.0,0.1887849220911696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553661571168829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4620103007384531,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1adyg1itterspark1es,2020/02/06,"Is it normal to have thoughts about death or worst case scenarios? I have two kids, a 3.5 year old and a 1.5 year old. I have thoughts about someone kidnapping my kids and my mind starts to create a narrative or plot on what I would have to do in that situation. Like so if the event were to happen, I would know exactly what I had to do to prevent them from fully kidnapping them...or I will have thoughts where they are in danger like there is fire in front of their bedroom door, so I will plan in my head on how I would save them. I have realized that I used to have these kinds of thoughts as kids. I would lay in bed and think about one of my parents dying and how sad it would be and would envision their funeral and how I would cope after the fact. Is this type of thinking normal?? I wouldn’t go as far as to say it interrupts my life or really my well-being. I still go out and function in society. Like I don’t feel like I hide away. But when I am out and about, I’m constantly thinking about how someone could run up at any moment and attack me and steal my kids and so I try to be aware at all times to prevent this from happening. Sometimes I do avoid going out because the day doesn’t “feel” right. Like the chances of something bad happening are “higher than normal.” But it’s not to the point where I’m ruining my quality of life. When I exercise and go on a run, I’m constantly thinking that the car pulling into the neighborhood is going to kidnap me or that someone is hiding in the bushes, but hardly do I ever stop my runs. Like I have these thoughts. I realize that I have kind of always have these thoughts but I wouldn’t go as far as to say they disrupt my life in a negative way. I do feel like I have to be aware at all times because if I am not something bad could happen and I won’t be prepared. Is this normal? I guess I’ve convinced myself that basically if it disrupts your life in a negative way than it’s abnormal and an issue. So is this something that should be explored further or is this normal thinking?",4.58978021978022,4.767034857142857,5.4038095238095245,85.09170329670332,69.47619047619048,8.842490842490843,29.48717948717949,8.730908602173464,2.0287564102564097,1600,56,344,25,26,523,172,420,0.109,0.8220000000000001,0.069,-0.9566,1,1,3,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,6,1,20,20,2,1,15,0,52,6,1,5,5,84,83,41,3,20,14,1,5,7,0,13,5,2,3,4,23,18,0,4,18,1,0,13,9,9,0,2,8,7,50,11,57,55,3,61,0,2,0,0,14,28,0,9,25,247,73,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06007538454006546,0.0,0.0,0.049097822614657685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08213683032949197,0.06783337418006394,0.0,0.12056636431593815,0.0880237286036658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15604302486396449,0.0,0.11529011617160825,0.0,0.0,0.046562407546973016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493120415739644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530816462641131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951801100413627,0.10315801637224832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461942675719011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953538171038026,0.0,0.25538148846467323,0.0,0.06467615798176181,0.0,0.07409704386603573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535703925284858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503683785322272,0.039678703896019976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20398526688020893,0.24690962621632104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729004481794022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35369864660948724,0.0,0.0,0.1515214933665913,0.0,0.048923937635325584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016848909320237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825142904170912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04625255341310396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06165758517394916,0.0,0.1148311480045681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115474532677246,0.0,0.0,0.18352203541188172,0.16674704360923245,0.0714066961088586,0.0,0.05110285170633302,0.0,0.0576582461423537,0.06036162981225875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23131114594743055,0.0,0.3439078355206096,0.08419968098762426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049018408495267216,0.0,0.07052797058044669,0.0,0.0,0.06235678889624924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11461647380236722,0.0,0.0,0.06491560719265935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3590168827753458,0.0,0.0,0.0929876284931418
mentalhealth,Jealous-Emergency,2020/02/06,"Breakups/Separating from people. As dumb and cliche as this might sound, why do we love or miss the people who hurt us in our lives?",3.91,5.442655384615384,3.549230769230772,92.77076923076923,72.07692307692308,6.7384615384615385,20.69230769230769,7.1686216300943375,0.1478307692307692,104,2,23,1,2,31,24,26,0.248,0.627,0.125,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,1,4,3,0,1,0,2,0,1,5,1,1,2,0,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773241397715599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112355826151881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.318116009743118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3739127051020523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.488713675982011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42397544379311614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180474256094505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BizarroBuzzman,2020/02/06,"What do you do when you get that overwhelming feeling of angst and depression to make it go away? I was in class today and I was listening to one of my students discuss their accolades and it just made me so depressed to see how well ahead my peers are. I've been holding in that blue feeling where I just feel like I want to cry and feel so much angst about where I am when it comes to my degree/major.  I detest the feeling so much and it's been happening so much more often since I transferred schools.

What do you all do to take your mind off of it and push you in more of a positive note?",3.1593727598566335,4.14859153225807,3.962365591397852,91.19410394265232,73.19354838709677,7.446594982078854,25.87455197132617,7.793537801064563,1.1649347670250902,466,15,105,6,9,149,73,124,0.086,0.8,0.114,-0.2785,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,5,1,1,15,5,0,1,2,0,10,0,0,3,1,22,25,13,0,1,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,1,5,0,0,3,0,3,1,1,5,8,17,2,17,20,6,14,0,3,2,0,8,7,0,1,5,81,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180933803927812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16588929256875182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21153839723212325,0.0,0.0,0.33173509350158586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4868672824919977,0.13757809141509528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061429778048904,0.0,0.10944677767505497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17029649755444468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408410880277034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18222239667734053,0.12854761848535184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19444934822390314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4247019828178493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049614952057156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19489968436874652,0.15346010064321242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15930289345060494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14479503640537886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825418639472702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358776616202584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315116468293626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anglophile1012,2020/02/06,"Requesting Workplace Accommodations I started a new job about three months ago. I work Tuesday-Saturday and have every Sunday and Monday off. Over the past three months, I have missed four or five days. Two of those were due to being sick, had a doctor's note, and the others were due to mental illness. I am bipolar 2 and also have problems with OCD and Depression. I am doing better than I have been since before I got sick 3 to 4 years ago, but I'm still struggling. I go to a psychiatrist every other week to try and get the best help possible. My boss is kind of cold and a little bit of a dick. I had to miss today, and he told me that it seems like I'm sick every two weeks and it was really inconvenient for him. I wasn't going to disclose about my mental illness, but 40 hrs a week is starting to wear on me, and I'm at a point where I feel like I pretty much have to disclose and ask for ADA accommodations to keep my job. Should I talk to him about it or go straight to HR? How would I go about talking to HR? The last two times I disclosed didn't end very well. People seem to take it personally like you're trying to fuck them over and force them to do something which sucks when you genuinely need help. I've found that not many people in the world of business are as kind-hearted as I would like. I'm just scared I'm going to lose a job that I need no matter what I do",4.248054594386776,4.390571754325261,5.28896770472895,85.73999519415611,70.21107266435986,7.944713571703192,25.39811610918877,7.594959193182576,1.064783006535948,1083,27,238,11,18,358,162,289,0.17600000000000002,0.7090000000000001,0.115,-0.9485,3,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,2,4,11,17,2,2,13,0,25,10,2,2,0,33,53,21,0,6,6,0,1,4,0,3,7,0,0,1,12,13,0,1,4,0,0,5,4,9,1,7,11,2,28,8,37,38,3,39,0,4,0,2,14,11,3,4,27,149,40,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17034759882952766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683936022700481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982676217905815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176149256783267,0.0,0.10083556880996783,0.08497961803013697,0.1049002351475333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061967053861235015,0.0,0.08275810712690049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834735111508996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851030346099499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24286796659100895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04858360241089544,0.06864334012699523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535254528651536,0.0,0.08882928904595358,0.050200590756466185,0.0,0.2730373822051769,0.0,0.07684817249863618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386151428426622,0.12880786976231978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860494296603201,0.08540500785429637,0.0,0.2001160571891186,0.0,0.07832232399009481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18776964892202835,0.09630268871438807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749484579678484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741538833426708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19366271672533256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338870064234847,0.0,0.07063373332026568,0.1424920288128097,0.0,0.0927997579732783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172426788868387,0.13322686375001275,0.08389795652048082,0.0,0.0,0.0908316430001437,0.10832171122355604,0.0,0.09775326862172633,0.0,0.09194063220233603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155468798897595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619812314296426,0.0,0.0,0.17494485249228206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948273294002496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397113950140335,0.0,0.0,0.13601930531424627,0.0,0.07673382525684821,0.0,0.0,0.1004491924650764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224416933279636,0.1544594098525853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05602809693200788,0.0,0.09107760636497184,0.0918135985328044,0.0,0.1304711899338079,0.0,0.2815840577362664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928041527986203,0.0,0.0,0.2312214370689452,0.0,0.08639220219195486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995122504727333,0.0,0.0,0.13651244600878112,0.0,0.0,0.06187576724259852
mentalhealth,PupusaMasterSeb,2020/02/06,"Finding enjoyment in hanging out with others. I am an introvert but lately I have been trying to break out my shell more than ever. I have always had a ""Fuck It"" mentality that helped me for better or worse. So I have been trying to ask people to hang out but I don't enjoy being around anyone. I feel terrible about it because I feel so selfish. Not only do I not find enjoyment in it but I also come across as dry and just downright socially awkward due to my social anxiety. I feel like I have to fight myself so hard to be social and it tires me out all the time. I mean I have gotten intimate with a female so that isn't a problem for me but I still didn't find enjoyment in seeking a relationship so that never went farther than a hook up. Anyone in the same boat?",1.8717932489451488,3.904896348101268,4.126860759493674,84.23607172995784,79.18987341772151,6.744978902953588,22.558649789029538,7.793537801064563,1.2076923206751051,605,19,119,10,15,209,93,158,0.179,0.6920000000000001,0.129,-0.8354,0,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,11,12,2,1,8,0,15,2,0,0,3,30,24,14,0,1,8,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,10,0,0,7,0,0,4,6,6,0,0,6,4,20,6,25,16,3,23,0,0,0,1,7,12,1,1,7,98,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212260166394048,0.12613455374373048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596550308381652,0.0,0.0,0.21198971557944185,0.0,0.0,0.1349467362411054,0.14171565893328916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240751275489488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13406853673556685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058087586261086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13712132288526002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22994451971747026,0.10829552286531073,0.0,0.0,0.41564999276236375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401419902526304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357943588267483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160720311154736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17099948578627028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405894100806559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16512533500438625,0.0,0.0,0.15276649656387065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691511769344465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529059642507912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509302754513776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14505061697898833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627503227467077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.463579017533247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210595188443887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839301877173536,0.17422975616733513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058385519498392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405249252300551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448258521560113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tialafoy0524,2020/02/06,"Serious Advice Needed I've never really been on this group before, so I'm not sure what the standard rules or etiquette are, so please forgive me if I'm not going about things the right way… 

Until I was five I didn't actually have an official residence. My mother was a whore who was with a different guy every week or two at most (literally, that isn't an exaggeration in the slightest), and she didn't know who my father was until I was a week old. There were six possibilities. I was bounced from house to house before I settle with my grandmother whom was verbally, mentally, and emotionally abusive with the occasional physical abuses mixed in. I lived with her until I was 16. I moved in with my dad and his wife (my step mother). She was manipulative, a victim blamer with everything (abuse, rape, molestation, etc., And I found out because when I was forced to open up about the things that happened to me I was blamed for all of it happening to me). She kicked me out in the middle of the night after I lost my job and stole every single penny I had out from under me when I was 18. I was forced to live with my fiance and his family. They've threatened to get rid of my emotional support cat while I was at work so many times I've lost count simply because they hate cats. They call me a liar and turn things around on me all the time. They've become so bad that the preacher refused to marry us because of them. They bleed mine and my fiance's finances so dry that we can't save money to move out. If we refuse to give them money then they badger, gas light, and abuse my fiance and and I until we give in. We've had to delay our bills on multiple occasions because of this. They expect us to do their errands for them and give them money that they don't pay back, but wonder why we stay so depressed and don't like talking to them. At one point they somehow found out we were thinking of trying for a baby (idk how. I honestly feel like they've bugged our room. They know things we've only talked about when no one else was home and we never told anyone else), and I was acussed of being a whore and trapping my fiance. Lastly, my boss keeps contradicting her self and has threatened to fire me over something I did not do on purpose. She expects me to be perfect and refuses to acknowledge any of my mental illnesses and invalidates my emotional issues while claiming to have the same issues and claiming I can go to her. I'm trying to keep the length short, sorry for how vague I'm being. Please give me advice. I have become suicidal and severely depressed yet again and I cannot afford to go to therapy.",4.978826929615778,5.701015265895957,5.8010002266802685,80.66039867392045,68.78805394990366,8.649234954097247,27.210755978692056,8.757208317658263,1.9115748158222825,2069,62,404,33,34,679,248,519,0.183,0.777,0.04,-0.997,3,0,1,0,3,0,50.0,10,0,14,4,20,21,5,0,20,0,40,5,0,4,6,83,70,45,1,5,8,5,2,2,0,0,2,0,2,2,16,42,0,6,9,0,6,6,13,13,0,5,29,3,81,8,70,38,6,58,0,4,0,3,56,27,0,7,26,290,97,5,0.0,0.34646998364794546,0.07133995517459774,0.0,0.0,0.14287476128083815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049713921300605465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051116730606243964,0.07490473338107563,0.0,0.06507896804119677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05621324880661925,0.061039639111340915,0.17825656957268327,0.16147750471263986,0.12441397722047673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464840028649614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12593049529219108,0.0,0.0,0.07637918755354955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221397291785772,0.24669992758226095,0.0,0.0,0.08153142308846661,0.0,0.0,0.12318826672580095,0.0,0.06570207922431757,0.0,0.06891690781625229,0.0,0.03696409528374923,0.052226241759298415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031176483870307,0.0,0.0,0.03819435628360017,0.2805159909843006,0.12464180477807757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238546455268527,0.1292930576454318,0.0,0.0,0.07217607346531058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333029689244082,0.0,0.0,0.16870675841597238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526052977243162,0.07254545326082386,0.1299582036480517,0.0,0.0,0.08035321559078132,0.05959034948312684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07143084137162971,0.0,0.1291061461485197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15960553287361476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411701721986233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14734533378981252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15539813627157167,0.0,0.054206446916647666,0.11276619827707685,0.0,0.0,0.06860411013537157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671142217137861,0.0,0.09907570868905276,0.05559966286841393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16049472052484393,0.06910787467427168,0.08241492718268142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04683294854800014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06243128867405188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626448073443827,0.08258786544999709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0562798169154329,0.0,0.08183508604804204,0.0,0.0779202256769814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996502777835802,0.0829587117350951,0.06890061732777321,0.0,0.0,0.1175180937587746,0.0,0.0,0.0836019629190892,0.0,0.19427091081985198,0.04684274573980963,0.0,0.0,0.08525625152479123,0.0,0.0,0.06985498061274639,0.0,0.09926702132355382,0.0795172704408793,0.07141298314685332,0.0,0.17587267866288747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05802736307763165,0.11728087677507115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596591088311242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927927705052164,0.053221326117277104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway01938472929,2020/02/06,"Difference in thought process? Sorry if this doesn’t fit here- idk what is but I thought this sub might know the most. 

When my boyfriend goes to do stuff, his thought process is ‘I want to play video games, let’s play video games.’ MY thought process is ‘if I want to play video games I have to get my switch out and turn it on and start the game up,’ or ‘I want to draw, which means I have to grab my computer and plug it in and turn it on and put in the code and wait for it to start up and-‘ and at this point literally doing anything requires motivation or me yelling at myself to get up. 

I feel so lazy at this point and I don’t understand why I have to make things seem so complicated. Suddenly a five minute process seems like it will take half an hour instead, and then I lay around for an hour instead and feel gross. Why do I do this? WHAT is it",4.204336057201225,4.271561915730338,4.111920326864151,94.40371297242088,70.29213483146067,8.045760980592442,27.979570990806952,7.686295010490155,1.1089146067415725,663,21,164,7,11,202,93,178,0.059000000000000004,0.8220000000000001,0.12,0.85,0,0,0,0,1,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,7,5,0,0,6,0,16,0,0,2,0,37,39,19,0,5,5,0,3,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,16,12,0,2,12,9,0,1,2,1,0,2,4,4,16,4,23,32,1,23,0,0,0,0,4,15,0,8,8,102,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796727945652988,0.12761453547393542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497733420319855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496713733579353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497920198049898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823475974557245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878304304828046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14658812380270414,0.0,0.07003501987295235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568922031365644,0.0,0.0,0.15615340917851678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15207484678674882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710297839561731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410932873099933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610063189936616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047191290555646,0.2029319393304963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641048532115147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10778359258749733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523734313319117,0.0,0.0,0.4552249804910059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118537320089165,0.0,0.14923549689212887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25365988672406403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587075157410135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mirror_effect,2020/02/06,"Ho'oponopono | Healing and Law of Attraction Hello Beautiful Souls! Welcome back! In today's video, I will be sharing the power of the ancient Hawaiian prayer, famously used by Dr. Ihaleakala Hew Len. This prayer of forgiveness is called Ho'oponopono. It is believed to be so powerful that Dr. Hew Len used it to cure mentally ill patients in psych wards, without physically seeing them!  I am also going to discuss the benefits of Ho'opnopono, how it can help with healing, manifestation, and assist with law of attraction! 

Aside from Fibromyalgia, I have dealt with severe trauma and mental health issues of my own. Studying psychology has equipped me, along with therapy. I have also done a ton of research through self help books, scientific journals, lectures from Dr. Gabor Mate. I am at a better place and would like to help others who may have endured similar experiences and are searching to rebuild themselves through self development, self healing, and become co-creators. We are all alchemists and can change our current situation. Let us meet ourselves where we currently are and explore a newfound healing journey.

Together We Will Grow! Together We Will Heal!

Cheers To New Beginnings!

Sending ya'll tons of positive energy, love, and light!

Namaste,

Rosie

https://youtu.be/UtHy0kqa8Y4",8.20780447390224,11.016185422535212,7.079569179784593,66.62187241093622,63.31924882629107,10.082187241093619,40.698425849212924,10.328600350310266,5.17695990057995,1057,60,140,27,17,321,146,213,0.034,0.752,0.214,0.9915,4,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,6,0,1,3,6,11,0,0,6,0,22,11,0,3,1,29,28,13,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,5,10,0,0,3,7,18,0,0,2,2,0,5,1,1,0,0,1,2,14,10,28,19,4,17,1,0,1,1,24,5,0,1,8,96,21,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348046797819495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288632405515668,0.0,0.0,0.16213795067527467,0.0,0.16540239269444604,0.0,0.12983978484861267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14990742723178416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15530344469114055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15023559986104773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436064374637176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343439470056521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15605008591038164,0.0,0.0,0.29520701230058405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322945619727546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501211717240144,0.0,0.07172299482591707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249999164175788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958959578271767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178812388849188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338315966936789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698700391041747,0.0,0.4594584231754434,0.16585130267571796,0.0,0.0,0.1650183926749704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678877929684826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915686006920872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765920011515981,0.2535900281517334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14151771573286628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428822245736694,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,edsfun,2020/02/06,"Anorexia Support I can’t post this in the subs for eating disorders, because they have too many rules.

I’m super stressed and upset. I can feel myself backsliding with my weight. I haven’t eaten in a few days now and I fear that’ll turn into many more to the point where I’m back in inpatient again. I haven’t been in inpatient treatment for many many years now managing to maintain my weight mostly within a certain range. I’m not sure what to do to stop myself this time. Worse is that I’m seeing my psych in a few days and he’s definitely gonna know. I know he won’t put me in inpatient unless I’m really bad off, but I don’t even want the (threat) lecture about that. Not even sure how this post will help me, but giving it a try and pleading for advice. I can’t go back.",3.045838445807772,4.09748711656442,4.258420245398774,88.72521728016363,73.5398773006135,7.396523517382414,23.39928425357873,7.793537801064563,0.9307345603271976,612,16,134,8,12,201,95,163,0.102,0.795,0.10300000000000001,0.3026,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,11,10,1,3,7,0,13,4,0,1,3,21,29,8,0,1,5,0,3,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,8,6,4,1,3,0,0,2,8,5,0,0,2,5,16,5,19,23,4,25,0,0,1,0,5,11,0,1,10,84,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271606412664838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20886547257208493,0.11339918381588455,0.08279107557668218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751778464014385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556548392868655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389718323811277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17940799606160165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528287332970822,0.06867174014616592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13028535590986765,0.07718633954891085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103339524196656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14927986465246718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5507771265992736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838831777851722,0.0,0.260144921667716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365307828674372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870060540716369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822633326514773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354675233583107,0.15557470692825967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15412034438829378,0.25600655191057314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791943520543916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220892654191286,0.14772684928255608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010673382833344,0.0,0.0,0.3307702134378004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384062724617441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745989178594664
mentalhealth,Thin_Wishes3,2020/02/06,"Not remembering childhood/teenage years? Does anyone know what can cause this? If it’s normal? Like I remember certain events, but there’s PLENTY I don’t remember. 

I have friends who remind me of things that happened when we were teenagers (I’m 27 now) that I have 0 recollection of.

Childhood, same thing. Pictures do not help jog memories at all. I started riding horses when I was like 12 and I can look through old horse show pictures and stuff and have 0 memory of it, if I wasn’t in the picture I would think people were lying to me about being there. This is the same for MANY things in my life.

I do feel like it’s a blessing to some extent because I don’t have to cringe over SO many awkward moments. I definitely dealt with trauma, sexual abuse at a young age (6), then growing up in a very (verbally) abusive environment. Although my mom was psychically abused in front of me regularly. 

Is it just a coping mechanism? Part of me is worried to dig too deep in any type of therapeutic setting like I’ll uncover something serious I’m just avoiding. Idk I guess maybe I’m just a forgetful person and I’m reading too much into it. I just feel left out sometimes when people can recall memories they’ve had growing up and I feel like I can never relate to it.",2.559919354838712,4.973102056451612,4.027993548387098,83.85249032258065,78.83870967741936,6.871225806451613,26.85548387096773,7.9765259561132025,1.8793498064516128,1002,42,190,18,25,331,147,248,0.16399999999999998,0.713,0.122,-0.9346,0,1,1,0,2,0,28.0,1,0,0,0,14,12,0,2,7,0,23,1,0,1,3,39,36,14,0,4,9,1,3,5,1,1,1,0,0,1,16,9,0,1,9,3,0,5,6,4,0,0,6,4,23,8,27,28,7,34,1,0,1,0,6,14,0,4,19,128,39,2,0.0,0.4300709770962921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227943051584212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08460116148717978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375624697487572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429320273011953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588184304794523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18353318124453627,0.17287493392260053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347893880027702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332874975811356,0.0,0.10699376426566973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109909837092415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649462208934273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13145931480858705,0.0,0.08546097718147595,0.29555549007022136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160369836754443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24533594650514376,0.12155379235755435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417056107282687,0.0,0.0,0.08894382148258399,0.0,0.09331730763673857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854751053080115,0.0,0.0,0.12696186430669884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102369438641046,0.0,0.16776270811479035,0.10564647395425496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102580345092287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41118465581103947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314636955184784,0.1196652311237254,0.0,0.08563951133094308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13850810752054218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411472403986873,0.07752746800970989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983194675190712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287432659888395,0.0,0.08594999908119143,0.0,0.0,0.07791556437729151
mentalhealth,cantw82die,2020/02/06,"How do I tell my psychiatrist that I won't be going to our sessions anymore? Hey Everyone! I'm not sure if this is the right sub but I hope you can help me.

I was diagnosed with depression a few months ago and I have been going to a psychiatrist since. Last month my usual psychiatrist was not available for our scheduled sessions. I tried to reschedule our sessions multiple times but his assistant would never respond to my messages. I also tried to contact him but he would just tell me to contact his assistant. During that time I found a psychiatrist who had significantly cheaper rates and was closer to where I live. I am also a lot more comfortable with that psychiatrist. Just now my previous psychiatrist messaged me the schedule for pur supossed sessions this month. How do I tell my psychiatrist that I won't be going to our sessions? I don't want to be rude and just not show up.

Thank you in advance!",4.292909441233139,6.546719601156074,5.346150289017345,77.27548747591523,72.64161849710982,8.312755298651252,31.18651252408477,9.029198982220553,2.9347606165703284,733,34,130,16,15,241,93,173,0.09,0.838,0.07200000000000001,-0.2922,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,4,2,0,1,9,6,1,0,6,0,19,1,0,2,2,25,27,11,0,5,10,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,1,1,0,4,7,2,0,0,6,0,30,4,15,14,3,21,0,1,0,0,21,5,0,3,12,100,37,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440623783470418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599311304891399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16117416051529354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13997649303095389,0.16495232282757907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529288889446385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781925702877477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770881298831193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089323723684873,0.0,0.0,0.16141701834102434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247383995088993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350634867813636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13816696995959746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3891608894624842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253438806115552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387894619761539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13443654766536056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15317126735397696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.426143618138329,0.1496247156568033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18953107537162533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22067807303163384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17899058820514835,0.0,0.09585731187348392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23089621199389898,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heujass69,2020/02/06,"Uncontrollable anger I’ve been dealing with anxiety and depression for a long time, but recently I’ve been having trouble with controlling my emotions as well. When I get mad, it’s extreme anger and what’s worse is that I can’t let it go. Before, going to the gym, playing basketball, or even just controlling my breathing would help me control it. But now this anger stays with me for the longest period of times and nothing makes it go away. It also results in me saying or doing things that I end up regretting. Does anyone else have the same problem and if so how do you deal with it",5.072105263157893,6.312808973684213,5.597324561403512,80.31335526315792,68.91228070175438,8.857894736842105,30.91666666666667,9.188382445141503,2.7013719298245613,469,19,87,9,8,151,83,114,0.271,0.667,0.062,-0.9828,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,3,8,11,4,1,4,0,10,1,1,6,0,24,15,14,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,11,8,0,3,0,2,0,3,1,9,1,0,2,1,9,2,12,11,1,15,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,3,8,64,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12761164602603065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207403279431238,0.0,0.0,0.11157817973245694,0.16350290217865615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499254674584787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578612077589006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5369290110756721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3290285434078617,0.1374412572054546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396446940719331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330399355682007,0.1794998006412357,0.14133561622978247,0.0,0.0,0.10539743246859988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083371074394505,0.0,0.27206954613031065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106959403572047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16317570710130785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121838445607346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651719785750936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15311600773589107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526912168106598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575605379418193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269000234138316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17008515298742194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601418726884387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18609831347051609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14347661267557574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16262001778347138,0.11335712509028555,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AverageMobster,2020/02/06,"I cannot feel any human connection and cannot make friends I've always struggled a lot with making friends. I do not feel any ""connection"" to people. I dont really care that much, though. I have many friends but no close or real friendships. I can be very extroverted and enjoy social events but it is like a facade. There is nothing behind interactions if that makes sense. I just interact with people for fun / entertainment because I am trying to feel a connection with others / develop real friendships but I cant...why is this?",3.354443413729125,6.257531642857143,4.380463821892395,79.52492578849724,79.51020408163265,7.237105751391463,25.23562152133581,8.296473431620573,2.1401102040816324,423,16,71,9,11,137,64,98,0.11199999999999999,0.669,0.21899999999999997,0.9446,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,3,9,0,1,3,0,11,0,0,3,0,22,18,8,0,1,7,0,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,3,8,8,7,17,2,2,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,3,2,48,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447832875144648,0.0,0.0,0.23665413787609965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606977303674434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774062490420487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20392860372290508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263941342974663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40329966188377103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500840277892935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479299556776065,0.0,0.0,0.3484422991575332,0.17641033289302133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791121219728094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16695924804145054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412616300803229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3961038766273686,0.11146989387344627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17737273990111366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18190427389967065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095570901652155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813567878102547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14356956011330424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700939858333468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brainslugsupporter,2020/02/06,"It's okay to disconnect Hello all,

I just wanted to remind you that it's okay to disconnect. You don't need social media or the internet constantly. If you're fighting mental illness it can help disconnecting for a while or limiting your use to things that you truly enjoy. I myself have made a slow transition away from Facebook, Twitter to prevent myself from feeling depressed or anxious about what's going on in the world. Focus on you and managing your (mental) health. I hope this post finds you well, and that you know it gets better.",6.0699292786421495,7.472703178217825,6.393578500707214,74.92267326732674,66.72277227722772,8.939745403111743,30.270155586987272,9.23628265651192,2.8260710042432815,435,16,71,8,7,140,70,101,0.095,0.696,0.209,0.8625,0,0,0,0,2,0,11.0,0,8,0,2,3,8,1,0,4,2,3,2,0,2,1,18,12,7,0,4,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,10,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,1,13,6,13,11,1,10,0,1,0,0,12,5,0,5,3,53,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577342632498193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21434587216211345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20177207383111906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465392490317168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964974106545264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153548867347989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085166365144714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191941966706338,0.0,0.1296577229175611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425030932727892,0.0,0.0,0.1529180267584574,0.0,0.0,0.22659537650062056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538026444443387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21587242237419912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4598247071854473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16916357606931126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21849590464534027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23256090262939266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515666672040973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19704047547031125,0.0,0.0,0.13456340538034284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20512605496680628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheDevilsGrits,2020/02/06,"Using humor as a tool to help deal with mental illness I was on fb earlier and made a comment on a post that was telling people to stop using the mental hospital tagging game because it's damaging to those who are mentally ill. I made a post with a psych ward joke and said that most people that I have run into who are mental health patients often joke about their illnesses and some experiences. I also said if you don't know anything about how we deal with it then you shouldn't preach about what we should or shouldn't do. Basically meaning if you're not mentally ill, you have no room to say anything about how someone chooses to tackle their situation. Some people took offense to it. Personally, and my former and current therapists agree, I think it's perfectly healthy to find a way to lighten the situation up so that it doesn't weigh you down. Anyone else agree? Or disagree?",6.82429411764706,7.119554605882358,7.0047058823529404,75.12117647058824,64.70588235294119,9.858823529411763,34.05882352941177,9.642632912329526,3.197517647058823,713,29,128,13,10,230,100,170,0.134,0.7490000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.4696,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,2,4,2,1,9,6,1,0,8,0,12,6,0,6,1,36,22,15,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,3,5,3,1,1,13,11,1,1,5,3,0,2,6,2,0,0,7,3,14,4,21,12,3,15,1,1,0,0,20,6,0,8,4,88,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498090149314456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304724864838041,0.1216946378272278,0.19547636449517905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240152823223431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24489479325014105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921769583694896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618055400931017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855428593247927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624772088541758,0.0,0.0,0.07960950971802215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527328132806491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247674531400702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12937613239183232,0.0,0.0,0.5984647505471747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24702198687034416,0.10370601108866798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274990360905796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259563049779917,0.0944512432735822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267006530087452,0.0,0.0,0.10063404522764184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992976397233399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103810843895873,0.0,0.0,0.13790195962046967,0.0,0.07610348131990362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319586395333526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051595352008411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09427466883668957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,penneva581,2020/02/06,What's living with ADHD like? I think I might have ADHD bit I don't know. It's kind of wierd because I never thought about it until my teachers started telling me all sort of stuff. I didn't know what was wrong with(still don't) so I kind of tried researching it. I hope I don't have it because dealing with anxiety is already hard enough as it is. So I'm curious. What's it like to live with ADHD? What are the symptoms? How do you personally deal with it?,0.5961363636363615,2.8584280833333366,2.4407196969696976,93.1080681818182,85.875,5.157575757575758,23.310606060606066,6.574015621080383,0.625033333333334,360,14,78,4,11,119,57,96,0.068,0.805,0.126,0.7382,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,4,6,0,0,1,0,12,1,0,1,2,14,19,5,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,12,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,1,11,5,11,15,3,3,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,3,5,53,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5495442884044452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682012886664302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116602289028592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858298756807315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16640517040799502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142804447342517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749250378961793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654002833001574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138927724933987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31744777836863025,0.16753411220216993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893122204337714,0.0,0.26918255126204743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16169548331032044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755711813063628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330888699347349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10788496159117757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744865381374641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15842465117270887,0.0,0.0,0.13322340485413384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766575939658263,0.0,0.1210059138488612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034844229077961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664935249426505,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayyyyyyy67527,2020/02/06,"Kinda miss having anxiety?? So I used to have really bad anxiety and have panic attacks all the time, and in recent years it’s become almost non existent. The thing is, as bad as it was, anxiety was a great motivator for me and I was always an over achiever. Now nothing motivates me and I don’t ever want to do anything anymore..",2.7542051282051325,4.897007215384619,5.518076923076925,74.79608974358976,76.84615384615384,8.64102564102564,27.756410256410252,9.2995712137729,2.95125641025641,259,11,45,7,6,93,48,65,0.266,0.6609999999999999,0.073,-0.9074,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,3,6,1,1,4,0,9,0,0,3,2,12,12,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,3,0,5,1,7,9,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,5,36,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21382218950264828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17767634138692992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4900558737510433,0.0,0.21176709530094864,0.0,0.0,0.17571924685174542,0.0,0.0,0.2429243128078569,0.0,0.0,0.3565818291465612,0.0,0.23583012954674185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19315258391358825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23542059432821216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048904183761829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505346564883784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367945379486191,0.0,0.2108378151692666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186166100145034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451265504468312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18442372356907144,0.0,0.0,0.1259471396277485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375080804841942
mentalhealth,evansokhowru,2020/02/06,"Is it normal to go between periods of time where you think your life is going great only to fall back into a depression so fast? I've been having this off and on battle with feeling depressed for around 5 years now, I go through a period of a month to 3 where I feel utterly hopeless and lost and nothing seems to be going right, and then it just goes away and I'm happy again for a month or 2 and then everything starts to add up and I get pushed back into a depression. Is this normal? Am I not even depressed?",3.101886792452832,4.320721594339624,4.4944811320754745,86.43908018867926,73.62264150943396,7.564150943396226,24.57075471698113,8.07648339933343,1.3126641509433965,403,12,84,6,8,134,71,106,0.201,0.7170000000000001,0.081,-0.9287,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,2,0,1,11,9,1,0,5,0,7,1,0,0,0,21,19,11,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,12,0,0,4,0,0,6,1,7,0,0,2,2,6,2,19,16,0,30,0,6,0,0,2,10,0,2,14,61,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297364277453067,0.0,0.0,0.15089489013113214,0.24699263666829335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.553319826366268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607893550078364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14434257160646813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16241472517625036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391015431956103,0.0,0.365105008217766,0.0,0.0,0.1770689944869246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709683751877722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344096768853147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17532073055818526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25638880634325123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31472011566456565,0.15410606053987155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12214831575541946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13715688852329488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14620992849719994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367795405762005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291002143337846,0.0,0.0,0.09365081543767577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342518085405036
mentalhealth,JetLag777,2020/02/06,"I feel so lonely I've no close friends at school, let alone a gf. I haven't really dated someone and now I'm already 20. I feel stresses and anxieties constantly. Recently, it is getting worse. now idk what's the point of going to class and study. Even if I got good grades, I still can't have a friend due to my low self-esteem and confidence.",1.5526961770623728,3.6421369859154917,3.1572635814889334,90.49211267605637,80.54929577464789,6.874044265593561,22.818913480885314,7.957251820313856,1.1563786720321942,270,9,58,5,7,89,56,71,0.276,0.602,0.122,-0.831,0,3,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,1,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,11,6,0,1,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,2,6,3,4,9,0,12,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,1,7,31,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377768331233269,0.25334850768273576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17562895119293248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480956627179997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15163618420043362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321662549442417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547476536437201,0.0,0.11994667514922205,0.0,0.13047625812148403,0.1925617760343008,0.18361701811881548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347622802521445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21702839373070526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707556331245766,0.0,0.2266836885346616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323483803332501,0.0,0.0,0.2395032090122064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945233631923424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833438027789505,0.0,0.26298443140295624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339628052954584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hanselandhandsome,2020/02/06,Having conversations with one's self? I talk to myself out loud sometimes.  I have conversations with myself.  Do any of you guys?,2.5376086956521746,5.385088739130438,3.5829347826086964,79.61614130434783,96.3913043478261,5.778260869565218,18.793478260869566,7.1686216300943375,1.0437913043478262,103,3,17,2,4,33,19,23,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,5,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31656756953075793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4609350858532924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154464129834076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4856358274705722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.460408283536677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3741649858210834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Seijass,2020/02/06,"Just want to let these out First off I'm going to say I've never been diagnosed for any mental health, nor have I gone to any kind of assistance such as a psychologist, therapist etc.

What I do know is that looking back I feel like I've been on a decline since high school. When I enrolled to senior high, which was a different school than the one I go to from primary & junior high, there were times that I remember I tried avoiding the gaze/greetings of classmates because I was worried they were making fun of me. I think I slowly got over it over the course of 3 years in senior high though. 

Then came uni. First semester I only barely passed the courses I needed. I'll admit back then it was partly due to my mistake of not properly doing what was necessary or making the necessary sacrifices because I was enjoying my comfort zone too much. But this is where I feel my issues started. 

Ever since that first semester I basically always felt like shit. I felt like I was stuck in a cycle. I know I should fix things going forward and actually go out of my comfort zone for once and make the sacrifices I needed, but then I tend to overthink about the results and how am I going to go through the process. What if I'm just inadequate and look like an idiot? What if I'm actually not up to the task & responsibilities? Eventually I graduated rather late with barely passing grades.

Then here I am today. Just got a new job, and all I could think about is the worst case about not meeting expectations. I often feel especially anxious meeting new people ever since my uni days. I did the job interview I felt like I was swept up off my feet by the interviewer and just went along with it. Couldn't stand my ground just because they were pushing me to make a decision on the spot. Doesn't help that I haven't got a job for almost a year since getting out of the last one just 2 months before my year long contract ended because I couldn't stand my mentality.

Add to all this is my always being reluctant to have an actual talk with my parents, because nowadays even I don't think I know what I actually want to do or am passionate about. Most of last year went by with me mostly choosing escapism which probably looked like all I'm doing is laze around to my parents. They don't really lash out about it but they always say to me every once in a while to find a job soon. 

Thats all I could think of for now. Do I actually need to seek help or is it just me being dumb and lazy? Do I just have to actually get out and have a real talk with my parents? Do ask if you need to know further.",4.794385746606334,5.456132309615391,5.850859728506787,80.35531674208146,69.17307692307692,8.886877828054299,28.75565610859729,9.007467420416297,2.183195701357466,2051,70,411,36,34,682,230,520,0.085,0.853,0.063,-0.9420000000000001,8,1,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,1,4,3,32,18,3,1,27,0,45,5,2,6,7,94,96,27,0,17,21,3,6,6,0,1,2,2,0,0,21,22,0,1,19,0,0,14,11,6,0,5,24,11,60,12,66,64,10,75,2,0,3,1,20,25,2,10,42,286,81,13,0.0,0.0,0.3550294252128872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06071776593488591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513609583774963,0.13139723248784513,0.0,0.08246853562512158,0.0,0.0,0.06850093641660572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05397851400515271,0.056686074028590626,0.0,0.0,0.09325002314303546,0.0,0.1848144075344464,0.0,0.05159640521328675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935094014443287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682513955195453,0.0,0.0,0.03910492727667924,0.0,0.0,0.061543828569740534,0.0,0.0633512664560322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370511864093455,0.0,0.06762469036471057,0.04004922302085155,0.10969669150860888,0.05108808406826463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197750033614233,0.043318064300838593,0.17465897232189345,0.0,0.05541981372432953,0.15472975808970071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335916679769746,0.0,0.20676355533425106,0.0,0.14548741676348154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445277691700617,0.0,0.0,0.08128549068992479,0.2562592410965633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328778289214726,0.2406857934422478,0.0,0.0,0.0631426167266257,0.13329489706660336,0.0988521671736009,0.0683995656026582,0.0,0.0,0.062003979909400174,0.0,0.17774086409625792,0.0,0.0,0.053660572570499665,0.15275582547064356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618988589241953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222127886006509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483987345688199,0.0,0.04457412177371983,0.17984203143526226,0.04676589070338219,0.11712442534269475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291498091518393,0.08217646483971687,0.04611608436883353,0.0,0.0,0.20198587880416002,0.06566241489821849,0.0,0.042037070456107606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06537540149422053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901655503271881,0.038844699680863806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868828216169827,0.0,0.0,0.09643968017087956,0.0,0.12273287080608775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06224154265264813,0.20063348490516394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04291816950382303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747315086190804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040257184446935,0.0402835793041653,0.15541130310213344,0.059574141005420266,0.0,0.03535708928301206,0.0,0.05747543172557178,0.0,0.0,0.04116757273541355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152886201262391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241956427980718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06157836604485141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561892797827018
mentalhealth,spookytime8899,2020/02/06,"""friends"" So my ""Friends"" and i were talking and it got into depression and killing yourself and they said you will fo to hell if you kill yourself and they said its dramatic to kill yourself can skmeone tell me what to say to them so they dont act like this",2.2476923076923083,4.421373000000003,2.5352307692307683,95.40976923076923,78.61538461538461,5.6984615384615385,29.63076923076923,6.742157984588678,1.3354184615384614,204,10,44,2,5,62,36,52,0.355,0.645,0.0,-0.9781,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,4,0,2,8,4,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,7,7,8,3,1,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,3,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,4,3,9,3,5,2,0,2,1,1,0,0,13,1,1,1,1,30,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338270738284895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24953388242788865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3289939994504352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028695338106994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7066741221775645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401913413403806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40506036388926736,0.16931793504906764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113238655936527,0.1860964145621425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Huzafa13,2020/02/06,"Life recently has kind of sucked and I need to vent life's been tough... mom left recently, and I learned she was probably schizophrenic due to some symptoms. I feel lonely at school, and i have a decent rep for being super smart, and funny at times but i want people to know me for who i am y'see? I want to make friends, but im having a little trouble due to me being shy af. I think i could by meeting new people through friends i have.  back in elementary the popular girls thought i was some sorta weirdo except one. Ended up crushing on her, but i never told her it went away and we stayed good friends and i lost contact with her and it sucks",2.753324080499649,4.4711378091603065,3.7369882026370576,89.4816238723109,75.48854961832059,6.595697432338652,24.88619014573213,7.348242739294969,1.0396351145038158,507,17,106,6,11,163,88,131,0.151,0.6509999999999999,0.198,0.7865,0,2,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,0,2,1,14,2,0,3,0,11,4,0,1,1,27,24,10,0,4,4,1,1,0,3,0,4,0,0,1,3,9,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,6,0,1,7,1,20,8,18,14,2,19,0,2,0,0,14,8,2,3,9,70,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464292055466314,0.12656380430340788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13141613911566075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578278689189147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322444656844091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38149829939379604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805492313721135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17779141939520712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171400918031635,0.09045739989309842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788335272187215,0.0,0.2325173839704769,0.0,0.16496796395465296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17967546670224366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098687957771154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927722978787658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204550146430627,0.12694622134256245,0.15896739055478787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153419231185027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282196348856449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17746182235857635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32503646197714503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657946581386218,0.13116132882248574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754369370783919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107778034793247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546617088869363,0.0,0.13067046698223986,0.09597697840544668,0.0,0.0,0.1572780845011207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941654187028979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525817072619843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImOnPluto,2020/02/06,"How do i know that i am feeling something?  

# Hey guys,

I really dont know if i do feel or not. How do i know, if i do so? And how if i dont? (Im 21 yo and a Male)

Im not stupid, i know what feelings are and i know when people are feeling it. But i really dont know if i do. How do i recognize that? Im feeling a big Void in me in a negative way. It makes my life boring and i dont have any reasons to move on, on life. Im struggling to find a Job, because how boring it is to find one..

Dont get me wrong im not Lazy. If i want something and find it impressing then im gonna do everything about it. I used to be addicted to Oxycontin and i did many things in a Day to get the Pills.

And no my life didnt got boring right after i got addicted. It was the reason why i did get addicted at all.

I do have Hobbys like reading Books and playing Games but they do bore me too sometimes, that i dont want to go after my hobbys.

I did nothing today. I did nothing today to get a Job or something. Just Useless things like now sitting on the PC.

I dont have any real contacts right now, i live with my Mother and my Brother who is Retarded (Physically).

My dad was never there for me, so i didnt mention him, also he doesnt live with us anymore since 2 years.

EDIT: Im Obsessed with Acting, Music and Movies. My Dream is to become an Actor, but it is hard to start with it. I dont even know where i have to Start. Im a master at Acting since im a Kid.

When i was a young Kid, my Grandpa (God rest his soul) was panicing when i was playing dead to make a Joke. I did let my Mother and him Panic a while and got up when they wanted to call 911. My mother was crying but i couldnt even understand why. My Grandpa said i have to Apologize and i was wondering why the hell?

Now i do and i can even understand them. But like i said i dont know if i really feel them. I never really felt Love aswell. I can tell that because i see People crying over Love and something but i never did have such problems. i didnt even had a real Relationship with a Woman in my whole life. The only Love i know is the love to my Mother and my brother. But i dont know if its really Love. I would say i would die for them but i did lie many times to my family at the same time. I did Manipulate her too much, that she cant even trust me anymore. But she knows im trying my best to get my life together! Im writing too much.. cya in the comments.",-0.4271762315896375,1.293918044692738,2.6107418317250755,93.73496495683092,85.49906890130353,5.618676146944304,19.074623328254614,6.823360437735567,0.08410942271880817,1838,50,445,23,55,655,200,537,0.162,0.759,0.078,-0.9945,2,0,4,0,0,0,64.0,1,0,5,2,28,27,2,4,22,0,62,14,0,11,4,93,109,48,2,14,22,9,8,3,0,3,9,3,0,5,18,21,0,0,26,8,0,4,24,13,0,1,25,12,83,14,40,78,7,46,2,1,1,5,46,17,1,10,26,304,101,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119164998539474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034524655471113934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871691941517805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563010289941415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05263453554355733,0.04768011345476298,0.0,0.0,0.04530638024722192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04408346786396797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484489187282424,0.027842386750732216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04480574943947313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5059729569367013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257358778900758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03880023532942385,0.0,0.04069874611300131,0.0,0.13097444823796867,0.0,0.041451917490814186,0.0,0.11837535534453132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277801475657467,0.0,0.024535658609129544,0.0,0.10358584472574932,0.0,0.0,0.042747095559714815,0.0,0.0,0.03867365754794897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5129651886868983,0.0,0.0856831531613959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609883950650339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044146323978760484,0.15246840184865293,0.0632750170402259,0.0,0.07624338395646235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19482220565643213,0.0,0.057635328315236115,0.08753932125122901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04588503383968427,0.06347281654392736,0.0,0.09989078919596013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284945110912123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02925448370849955,0.032834272963657436,0.0,0.10130614666306524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05986009718037341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041309800617867334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043183711310549065,0.09827843963643502,0.13828553420883602,0.08877607086284735,0.0,0.04635060176361717,0.0,0.07373735264000138,0.0821329705051722,0.03433212973951562,0.0,0.0,0.034402517090849835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071424695951399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294374646259102,0.042698239940647004,0.0,0.061114767737800814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04513277768012407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037734255659063104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736315460989176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05034791381826028,0.0,0.08184406979951125,0.0,0.0,0.02931097336094107,0.0,0.0,0.08988720810423101,0.051930634469255284,0.037286771119634736,0.0,0.0,0.07639194260244457,0.03426794660898213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686812180993725,0.048200027886910614,0.0,0.0,0.046818223146404256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133634054277085,0.04720183573840553,0.0,0.027801370804630673
mentalhealth,jfhqud,2020/02/06,"I'm falling back into a dark place. I normally only come on reddit when I start lossing hope so here I am. For months I was extremely depressed and didn't care or put effort in. I stopped eating and lost alot of weight ( I'm already very skinny). I also started hurting myself. Around new years I started to feel like myself. I started doing things in school, talking, taking care of myself and eating. Recently I've been getting worse and I'm scared of going further then before. I dont want to die and have no intention on doing it, I don't think I'd be able to anyway. But I'm starting to skip meals and have hurt myself 2 times so far this year. I don't know what to do. I started talking to a psychiatrist recently but I haven't told them much and I'm trying to build up courage but it so hard right now.",0.7106886227544926,3.0837438263473054,2.7167994011976053,90.45675598802393,86.78443113772455,4.7771257485029945,21.523652694610767,6.2581,0.4186050299401201,637,22,128,6,20,213,103,167,0.15,0.785,0.065,-0.7440000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,4,17.0,0,0,1,3,10,11,0,1,3,0,14,5,1,1,0,23,38,17,1,3,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,10,5,1,3,0,0,4,6,6,0,0,5,3,18,5,18,32,2,33,0,5,0,0,4,11,0,3,19,81,23,1,0.12057955143917533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330625334136203,0.09642742372171646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734136513031327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927182321252048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260431717113078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458777777961566,0.0,0.0,0.10386860672170196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385499096761418,0.0,0.1251425373378168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14131833625707407,0.0,0.0,0.2467659676805877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060968644217789476,0.08614205564108045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06299783888951488,0.0,0.0685281378397367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080155938519004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197627017139169,0.0,0.0,0.25816580740247624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626736804327353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05890907812477809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162682427723582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624544756272632,0.0,0.0886398443688015,0.0,0.0,0.11645648215869915,0.0,0.0,0.1181423589475143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170618239217844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597996720464708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212157534919522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23811552044142184,0.0,0.0,0.10297427809357992,0.0,0.0,0.12072116626343828,0.1220329434914625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5120809627691615,0.0,0.0,0.1008099041980554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066081637192899,0.19383455194915905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010769608128833,0.07726250777333113,0.0,0.0,0.07031090611924946,0.0,0.0,0.11521892872328768,0.0,0.08186560037756739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994907580495207,0.07112094354727817,0.0,0.0,0.14683340933262692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12288086431579448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529855554188873
mentalhealth,lillian_42,2020/02/06,"Aversion to therapy I can’t think of a time when talk therapy has helped me. At this stage the main problem would be that I can’t open up about how bad things really are. I can’t go inpatient. My ex filed for emergency custody of my son last time that happened, and it took forever to fight that and get things back to normal. So i hate when people suggest therapy as such a strong cure for everything. I’d go in and be like “I’m a shit person, and I don’t deserve to live” and be admitted immediately.",2.236720085470086,3.970884701923076,4.233974358974358,85.28880341880344,76.98076923076924,8.468376068376068,25.97863247863248,9.150863307647796,2.115742735042736,395,15,85,10,9,135,71,104,0.201,0.733,0.066,-0.9402,0,0,0,0,1,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,3,0,4,0,10,1,1,1,0,12,19,10,0,3,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,2,0,0,3,4,5,0,0,1,0,8,2,13,14,1,14,0,0,0,0,8,4,1,0,7,54,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080213503796182,0.15289120787858562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645696206430236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566867287162101,0.0,0.20813399688167009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16192569321771186,0.0,0.0,0.18078558806542144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273638387407287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14926104811601934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945947073156113,0.0,0.16169160660657414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17941127647654148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694708422500253,0.15988668730798766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17521383978220112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173064942103996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18796225026360772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717881334122795,0.0,0.0,0.6282149736372915,0.0,0.2433034880558591,0.11733103407517237,0.0,0.0,0.21354862945780426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20344461729048255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007779732588795,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,orlad88,2020/02/06,Starting that slippy slope Trying to cope is trying to kill me. Just holding on. Feel like I'm not being heard. Feel like it's more than just depression.,1.4740000000000002,4.165619400000004,2.2816666666666663,92.0625,88.33333333333334,4.333333333333334,17.5,5.985473137389443,-0.18599999999999994,122,3,23,1,4,38,25,30,0.23,0.637,0.133,-0.6872,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,0,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,1,2,4,5,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.298431478518458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3503916849379846,0.4950652980289308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3833400399306281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33855519352785024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452475280140229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4704881668729285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i-love-tree-rats,2020/02/06,How do you meet people (friends or dates) when you're depressed? Right now I'm in this mental state that I have nothing positive to talk.  How can I pick myself up from this low point?,3.0674774774774782,4.683971783783786,3.2524324324324314,93.71126126126127,74.4054054054054,6.014414414414415,23.144144144144143,6.42735559955562,0.37253873873873866,144,4,31,1,3,44,32,37,0.23,0.77,0.0,-0.8385,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,4,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,4,4,0,9,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,1,3,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3509041854112341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147662422207648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4105764390721546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3909237230540317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28244884834911643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.385136934652884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3479284417251117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3274631046739079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vanilla_boo,2020/02/06,"Teenage Social Trauma? From the age of 13, I feel that I have been suspected to like a lot of social trauma. Right now, I am an 18 year old senior high school student, and I just feel that something is not right. From the age of 13 I was severely bullied and degraded and rejected by numerous groups, for my effeminate personality, and I feel that is where the entire problem happened. And on top of that discovering I was gay was not easy seeing I grew in a society where it is illegal. I engaged in various acts that probably made it worse when I thought it made it better, like messaging strangers online, or trying to fit in a group that constantly made me feel bad about myself. Or even taking substances. And coming out to the wrong people in the hope I would gain validation. Right now, I feel that I am so much confident, however at least two times a week I feel I am not myself and feel horrible of who I am and what I want to do. I feel like I am Jules from Euphoria; constantly looking for validation in the wrong areas for my identity and constantly being done wrong by everyone.",7.3803877638948725,6.649867236966827,8.108918569582077,71.09057302886687,63.83412322274882,12.222490305902634,35.769495906936676,11.567385478589935,4.1739535545023685,861,35,162,24,11,290,115,211,0.20199999999999999,0.662,0.136,-0.9519,1,1,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,9,15,0,0,11,0,17,1,0,3,0,35,36,13,0,4,6,0,8,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,13,11,0,0,10,0,0,3,3,9,0,1,9,10,24,6,26,25,4,33,0,1,2,1,7,17,0,4,16,118,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198762443216818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743670472948436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490198486940968,0.0,0.3571649667273329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274249876943075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276646447754591,0.0,0.0,0.10527247236178072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44564343615913066,0.07870570636393831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742325971718366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164010033015333,0.0,0.10942399695825564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16147097618766318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251533079730842,0.0,0.0,0.09366287555039003,0.0,0.3127374925390097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098786952686864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560522957035647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763782356649427,0.09619648342022594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878225023386108,0.10541812778405467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822545817262844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149825652158836,0.08779148987728916,0.0,0.0,0.12446111510933346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246095564254212,0.0,0.08481450311468429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283437792354124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08746293654021968,0.06424120587813119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07479842286874315,0.0,0.10762040485381877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498131554326234,0.0,0.0883719940265522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227297923888456,0.0782618420862996,0.3613618858301389,0.0,0.07094608098366917
mentalhealth,ThrowAwayACount6996,2020/02/06,"I need some advice If I take 10 different depression tests and they all come back as moderate  to extremely severe should I talk to someone, and if so can I do so anonymously?",2.0755882352941164,4.756553911764708,4.036764705882355,81.26044117647061,83.41176470588233,9.282352941176473,26.14705882352941,9.516144504307137,3.1800235294117645,139,6,26,5,4,47,27,34,0.191,0.809,0.0,-0.7645,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,6,7,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,3,5,2,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,20,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3481767761586534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27397627924531004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069249029854003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3068846693273744,0.0,0.0,0.3722625192806345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641953801393305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40252283166629743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018957701322379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26789675097969345,0.2863841777122056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,E2M9S,2020/02/06,"Was I molested By My Father? When I was young, around 7 all the way to around 10 I was very quiet an mentally disturbed. I never was able to piece what happened that made me so shy an scared but yet sexually over active at a very young age. I was into sex an pornography since I was in elementary school. I could say it was due to my mom sexualizing her self as a stripper/prostitute, along with the many men I heard her sleep with at a very young age. I’ve always felt like I was wrong for the way I grew up even though it was never my fault, it was something I was born into. I bring all of this up to speak on the behalf of my father. When I met him after the incarceration of my mother things always seemed like I was a sort of hated favorite of his.
He was more cruel to me then he was my 2 younger brothers. He would state things like my moms drug use and loss of her kids as a way to hurt me when I was bad. He always said I was the worst out of all of the 3.  Now when I was young an taking showers an baths he would always be there for not only me but my brothers as well. He would always wash very normal then proceed to take longer amounts of time handling my penis an butt. After bathing he would take us in his room an tell us to lay on his bed where he put lotion on us. He would always look at my lower half while pumping lotion, the first times he bathed me. Just as I stated with the baths an showers he would also take excessive amounts of time rubbing lotion on the lower half of my body.  As I grew to be a teenager he started a “joke” stating that I had a big butt. I always thought this as nothing but now I feel that it’s strange for a father to comment on his sons butt. What I would really want is for you guys to give any opinions you have. I’d like to know if this sounds strange or normal to anyone else, if so please give advice as it’s very much needed at the moment. Thank you all.",3.9394306930693053,3.952010438118812,4.9366574257425775,88.45190693069306,70.85643564356435,7.4540990099009905,24.823366336633658,6.742157984588678,0.70185299009901,1483,35,337,10,25,487,191,404,0.121,0.7909999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.9437,4,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,3,3,0,2,18,18,3,2,28,0,30,8,5,2,6,45,54,25,0,14,8,9,3,4,0,7,2,6,8,4,15,10,0,0,5,5,0,4,3,11,1,3,24,10,53,7,61,20,10,61,0,2,1,4,48,22,3,6,33,227,68,1,0.07674959250455868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499881352905166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06137662139703154,0.447032664718211,0.0,0.0,0.052192354758770265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05366509959609808,0.07863902736814662,0.0,0.13664681837517595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640827039086859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525149531545978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06127830444370884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900516092233217,0.0,0.06411443624495164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05069238200661482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03880690003753395,0.0,0.07369164474771818,0.0,0.0,0.06528316417683011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472504052580369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599416313325752,0.06786941118235955,0.0,0.0,0.0757743330810373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216202614895854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042179568865259996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998389650426291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445032782501985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726223201553253,0.0,0.07781204047474376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734553754778598,0.0,0.0,0.17977639028539416,0.0,0.0,0.05641978141214706,0.0569088503515748,0.11838803440362172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503966103460409,0.0736433039560806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837152356881058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424800509993488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715453884677342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04916775424405494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300643795167269,0.06103435646270417,0.07683973117172953,0.07767468507980077,0.0,0.06986994650304673,0.08006656344641888,0.0,0.0,0.06348805602817599,0.0,0.07680502014238473,0.0,0.0,0.059085585955842485,0.0,0.0,0.05432375660271133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23082456783515676,0.0,0.06708252672420907,0.07066071314524447,0.0,0.0,0.1019780378569297,0.0,0.07540608495676347,0.06093060343594496,0.13425991377984475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27696092956471835,0.06628700570357211,0.0,0.31663225841913034,0.04526889817256277,0.18276076239193184,0.0,0.0,0.06900710091711419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3816449592329712,0.0839136310508565,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MantisToboggan1993,2020/02/06,Hello. I’m not sure I’m in the right place and forgive me if I’m not but I’m looking for some advice. A friend of a close friend has tried to take their own life twice this week. I’m looking for some help in what I can say to my friend to make them feel even a tiny bit better about this situation. I’m not very good with this sort of thing but I can’t not say anything. Any help or advice very much appreciated.,0.9754120879120868,2.468356802197804,2.5913049450549472,96.74432005494509,79.87912087912088,5.429120879120879,17.968406593406588,5.985473137389443,-0.6033197802197803,323,6,81,2,8,106,58,91,0.047,0.662,0.29100000000000004,0.9806,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,1,2,7,0,0,4,0,3,1,0,1,1,18,14,5,0,1,8,0,1,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,5,6,7,11,14,5,6,0,0,2,0,11,5,0,5,1,44,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35022601186151525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12186272953334693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746703848270282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584885976426201,0.1956409259808348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183604776298228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060933895700428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4153504186160758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150305178838717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402291174893671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265748666784528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009671782151641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961796524750415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317332508628325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872267572403633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530365548937623,0.0,0.28501543217329445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20142927432288274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16889468934313984,0.0,0.1347367445373821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190530883607257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216656205611555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957189530735204,0.0,0.0,0.14374412027823905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,missnightingale77,2020/02/06,"Has anyone experienced their individual symptoms AFTER having mono or another Epstein-Barr related issue? If so, how long after did it take for symptoms to appear? How long after were you diagnosed?


Did you experience a high fever while battling Epstein-Barr? How high?


Were you experiencing symptoms before? If so, did they increase in severity or intensity after having the virus?


If comfortable sharing, what it's your current mental illness diagnosis? (Again, this is optional, so there is no pressure or expectation to answer.)


Thank you! 💙",6.096666666666668,9.65765866666667,7.324444444444445,58.58000000000001,73.44444444444446,9.377777777777778,35.66666666666667,9.642632912329526,4.921466666666666,440,24,54,13,10,148,63,90,0.096,0.779,0.126,0.6062,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,5,2,0,8,5,1,1,2,0,10,7,0,3,0,13,13,13,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,5,2,7,3,8,8,1,14,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,8,9,47,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20402494743771754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360487598997283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16556582467513414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19748574903024896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903280428271998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4111504707294106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20308186051110613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3443789121916122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19608208214187767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21981015890451405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.606702166045225,0.14629338454934632,0.0,0.0,0.1791350890875811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThatCrAzYSmileGirl,2020/02/06,"I'm such an awful person Sorry for the wall of text and sorry if it's hard to read or understand.

My empathy has been fading before my eyes and I've only recently noticed. When someone is upset, I don't care unless I'm affected by the reason they're upset. I don't think ""What can I do to help?"" when someone talks about negative feelings, I think ""Oh my god, I don't care, please shut the fuck up."". Hell, today my best friend said in a vent discord channel she was going to get off of all texting apps and stop talking to people irl for a bit because she feels like a bad person, and my first reaction was to roll my eyes and think ""Whatever, talk to me again when you stop being a bitch."". I still care about my friends and I'd prefer them to be happy, but when they're upset I don't care and am even annoyed by it. The only person I feel a noticeable amount of empathy towards is my boyfriend. The only other time I'm empathetic at all is when someone's laughing. Even if nothing is funny, if someone is laughing, it's near impossible for me to not laugh with them. I don't show my lack of empathy when I'm around people, I actually pretend to care so they don't hate me or feel even worse. I listen with a concerned look on my face, and give a bit of advice if needed. But in reality I just want them to shut up. I'll never ask if someone is ok, because I don't want to deal with their problems and sobbing. I used to genuinely want to cheer up my friends and care about their problems, but now I'm like a shell of them. I used to have food intentions, but look at me now. I'm just an unempathetic loser who only has people who care because they pretend to care about their problems. If they knew I didn't care about their problems, they'd all ghost me, and I wouldn't blame them. I hate myself more than I did previously for being like this. This empathy loss just adds to my never-ending suffering. I'm a failure of a human being. I'm better off dead. I'm a toxic person and don't deserve care and love. I don't really care if anyone responds, because I deserve what I give, no empathy. I just needed somewhere to put this. I hope someday soon I'll get a chance to kill myself. If you read all of this, I'm sorry for wasting your time.",3.5693401287553637,4.286290083690993,5.2065423819742485,83.67165906652363,71.98283261802575,7.713412017167382,27.22344420600859,7.865858978985527,1.5612448497854077,1753,59,364,22,32,597,196,466,0.255,0.602,0.14300000000000002,-0.9947,0,0,0,0,0,1,56.0,0,3,13,5,26,46,7,3,19,2,32,6,3,5,5,72,84,35,3,21,20,0,5,3,3,1,0,2,0,5,12,18,1,2,11,6,0,2,15,19,0,1,7,11,61,27,56,71,10,38,1,4,4,2,40,16,4,11,23,238,73,2,0.0,0.0,0.05678143266895655,0.0,0.0,0.056858976277082425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04068521195551758,0.0,0.0,0.05179814078874245,0.0543963333820884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048583127783799515,0.1418793070197294,0.0,0.04951225336021125,0.0,0.06106292918390745,0.05146105148302396,0.12704873301723005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.65257288787093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059987517541792476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05153578878021162,0.0,0.0,0.11529450175207424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176829608253219,0.041568302401515655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04949323474011225,0.07035910163249788,0.0,0.1348637668187022,0.053792294231930965,0.06079987755371082,0.11163519668366892,0.033068613646787065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06194039542214382,0.05212349340748534,0.11489384443121925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03900104855088097,0.0,0.0,0.0577921221430951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437451692085366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528065723976631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772367024002243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05251540503803912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628880431135913,0.08975371906434827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05583132153127681,0.13249097021417985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17701320421931882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101715658329674,0.2032241217318642,0.0,0.06387108139401639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22270571305548895,0.0,0.058493299927452815,0.0,0.0,0.11640408663263495,0.0,0.037275631981527536,0.059825204515825285,0.057451948914735464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055348493239302805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465053043095365,0.0,0.0,0.19540438806091667,0.0,0.0,0.04646765216844862,0.0972926998685222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030382508266573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185028950793913,0.0,0.0,0.06785779572912178,0.0,0.05515380627430259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06057398751629875,0.0,0.10050855760053494,0.0,0.0,0.1029593570684832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05929680792064381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MWock01,2020/02/06,"I swear I'm not even human So I'm 18 year old guy who is a senior in high school. I feel like I'm not even human. I have a couple friends but no ""real"" friends. They just talk over me to show their alpha maleness bullshit. Of course if they posted this I would be the bad guy. So I guess don't judge them too harshly. They can be funny too. I have never gone to any parties. Hell I've talked to my friends outside of school only a handful of times over discord. Other than that I have never left home. I'm pretty sure most people don't even think I exist. I'm really nerdy, just today I picked up ""Capitalism without Capital"" from the local library. I listed to Peter Zeihan and Industry 4.0 about emerging economic trends. I fucking hate that about me. Of course I'm an immature 18 year old little prick getting advice from 14 year olds. Man up. When I was 14 I was dumber than a can of paint. Because of my shyness, everyone thinks I'm extremely naive and innocent. Especially naive. 2 Different girls liked me for the longest time (1 just got a boyfriend) But everyone thinks I'm extremely naive. Like I know what they're doing but I'm just so anxious. Of course what do I know. Maybe they're all just more developed humans than me. Worst of all, I don't use social media. Never have and TBH it's WAY too late. Feels so lonely. As a person that reads studies, ""Social Media Makes Teens More Lonely and Depressed"" bullshit. How can connecting yourself to the world make you lonely. A city that connects itself to a railroad makes it more connected to others? See what I mean about this nerd shit? Sorry for ranting. No one probably read this but if you did, thanks.",1.5420520614137665,4.104061927051673,2.943161094224924,88.9868498168498,84.74468085106382,5.441228275270829,21.505806250487105,6.900799576094004,0.7258163977866103,1310,43,252,17,39,425,184,329,0.243,0.649,0.10800000000000001,-0.9951,1,6,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,2,5,0,20,20,5,0,13,0,19,4,3,6,6,42,48,17,0,3,14,0,3,3,3,1,0,0,1,9,16,4,0,0,8,3,0,1,11,12,0,1,5,4,30,8,32,40,7,28,1,4,1,1,24,10,4,4,18,152,46,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09835968420873234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844939660537701,0.0,0.0,0.11371240507856525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404338979653914,0.06135884229698639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137372977586753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866946942773328,0.0,0.0,0.1051638889967369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19944662260667526,0.0,0.0,0.19236186354764834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178919514061673,0.07190852465196668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332992674867119,0.09305466647398172,0.05258850183100282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050363948422655,0.0,0.1108837133080636,0.1993301369920649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937676507497106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063483805954007,0.10096597580443918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063559217614498,0.0,0.11354412826861568,0.0,0.10936282276615353,0.0,0.0,0.1475260207700485,0.10088355625844424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20156558717439726,0.0,0.10112228159342802,0.10964367601415057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23289587788323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168639944103899,0.0,0.06820697604006118,0.0765532727099314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978205896266132,0.08788876333146332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096400433934373,0.10240313646583946,0.10852397829531753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20136608063425013,0.11456833838413225,0.06448268383371789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037380896033101,0.08020964178737648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332173370285473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20521182734324567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11267592888653025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486690163317736,0.0,0.0,0.1618066408272701,0.0,0.09267033842125837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19348851975533127,0.0,0.0,0.11738641453007123,0.0,0.09540993037956903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693429457547626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989589003144364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702860066570336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150299337824782,0.0,0.0,0.1944571079681746
mentalhealth,LDim,2020/02/06,"TW: Sexual abuse. Hey, I'm a victim of sexual abuse, when I was 15 I lost my virginity to a 24 year old man, I was in a very toxic relationship until now I finally got rid of it, now, the thing is I want to forget everything that happened with him and forget I had been involved with that abusive person, my question is, how do I overcome with that trauma, last week I told my therapist about it, but I still can't figure out how to finally stop feeling bad, can someone please give me advice?",6.609300000000001,5.239661330000004,8.022000000000002,73.17100000000003,65.7,11.2,33.0,10.355215969177356,3.2179,383,13,76,8,5,134,71,100,0.228,0.7140000000000001,0.057,-0.9382,0,0,0,0,2,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,7,4,1,0,4,0,9,1,0,2,0,15,17,6,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,7,1,14,0,12,10,0,14,0,1,0,1,9,2,0,1,12,53,20,0,0.0,0.5869970988691476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613743841827154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378862730411282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14841855173437432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350051555377484,0.0,0.0,0.3618089309541248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15841879591846028,0.0,0.0,0.13207876123987228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460341026615606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461238170918433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18027147936231094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17328824771722345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441952073483391,0.0,0.18127580026793216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18499629923674388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17730019231496622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992387582524202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318822329223405,0.13806570707714966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19174203551435925,0.10971268934107202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577998014123624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625905080478853,0.09740474844175498,0.0,0.13246656789707156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634572589626796
mentalhealth,Okbanana1-1,2020/02/06,"Don't know what i have.. Well imma try to explain myself to tye max
I'm in a situation where i don't know what i want i feel like i can't in any place i'm not okay with my body at the same time i can't do anything like i can't attack a changement i tried to change my entourage well cause i thought that my close friends were toxic but i don't know even if i change my close circle same thing i feel easily offended by any word low self-esteem can't make any change in my life even if i start going to the gym i can't last one week is my maximum i missed feeling happy i have no energy i tried to start reading books nothing and i can't even finish a half of a book i always relapse i tried even no fap and i always replace i lost aloooot of my social skills i used to be sociable now i can't even talk to new people i feel always that i have bad luck but i don't even believe in that anymore i feel like i'm ruining everything i feel anxious and a bit depressed please help if anyone could make it out of my same state... Thank you",0.26978925384469576,2.1023026506550258,2.4118207708372914,95.504676286311,83.62882096069869,5.379988608315929,19.563508638693754,6.498293943080001,-0.0441996962217579,813,22,193,8,23,274,115,229,0.145,0.664,0.191,0.8652,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,2,10,18,2,0,7,1,19,2,1,4,0,35,43,8,0,5,6,0,6,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,11,4,0,1,14,8,2,2,3,6,39,10,18,38,4,21,0,5,0,0,6,11,0,4,11,116,46,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521421915956637,0.0,0.0,0.20606830387209105,0.0,0.0,0.1141111712001825,0.10017356859900013,0.07062768804618523,0.0,0.08312162002152704,0.0,0.0,0.1149120701629315,0.0,0.0,0.0843381127563919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380230631398655,0.0,0.0,0.1102754274945726,0.11219798457336506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037638419422222,0.3205616901263588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806472922406374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869987148191363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4002920821495945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078017902173934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30643844701889544,0.14432138624882287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803913341632886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05740561782788892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752572532043184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06770405653870958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653535281735168,0.08233563774408015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134548900265515,0.14804336431844545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026301616467103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484829094492887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975549098388916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692064931672342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844616393942839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07002677035533464,0.0,0.10553267722279228,0.11087730885613144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103611512432972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053741874809626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353810162426554,0.0,0.102965731601967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298906975706635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118703179310162,0.0,0.0929953143235416,0.0,0.0,0.06710574562918523,0.0,0.0,0.08018968909642414,0.058899032325284616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27431332685653315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872391553464664,0.0,0.0,0.05957759591223705,0.0,0.08102315113284067,0.0,0.1816380490571169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aboringper,2020/02/06,Why do I like people so fast Is it just me? Why do I like people and fall in love so fast and I notice that most of the people that I know isn’t like this some of them has never fell in love or liked anyone before how?? Is it low self esteem or what because I hate it I get attached sooo easily to people who don’t even deserve it.,0.1497683397683396,1.741505405405405,2.565289575289576,95.49959459459463,82.78378378378378,4.769111969111969,14.625482625482626,5.288315135182226,-1.0157003861003866,256,3,61,1,7,88,47,74,0.069,0.675,0.256,0.9417,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,6,8,1,0,1,0,7,2,0,1,1,10,12,7,0,0,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,8,6,5,12,2,8,0,1,0,2,5,3,0,4,7,43,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141051322818559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229701344409446,0.0,0.17165374091748653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133237944076724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539336953109192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19916239785664208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086318723228474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39421201418857177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641306997277803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558332122926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22966608396506044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5594048942886163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21044393418911314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640521950696754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moonverse,2020/02/06,"is feeling empty always bad ? my friend is the cold type and he says himself that he's not great at empathy and quite apathetic. whenever i ask him how he is it's either the obligatory ""fine"" or just meh. today he said he feels nothing, no emotions at all and while this isn't the normal state i got so worried.. he's a bit closed off, it's hard to get to him and whenever i try to help him he says that it's me who have issues, which i do, but so does he !! is this something to worry about ? i want nothing more but to make him happier, whatever it takes. how ? help !! :(",0.7455602240896333,2.7091777226890765,2.9531302521008413,91.55277661064429,82.69747899159664,6.319607843137256,21.68137254901961,7.492282038375204,0.7542431372549014,435,14,98,7,12,148,75,119,0.14800000000000002,0.728,0.124,-0.4692,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,3,1,19,16,12,0,2,6,0,3,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,10,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,7,12,3,9,14,4,7,0,0,0,0,21,4,0,1,2,60,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15302232839845772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17192481724359765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535516246413483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20077483946933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093507036187074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20686652821380014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18597412982288544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14208328038229726,0.0,0.09608191570037708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708431754442894,0.2027541045467621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647412889989119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24653309249063435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19194732910938606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227569213844766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801862472289987,0.3529204692275818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19560386135077606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749342095915786,0.2924946677387973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157779186929592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382724402856437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17431888280765248,0.0,0.0,0.12485831026732795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084709669870626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3735255796011124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Polarcannon,2020/02/07,"I'm in a weird place I don't really know what to do, I struggle to do basic things to take care of myself. But whenever I have someone that would be disappointed in me, I do really well, and I currently don't have anyone.

My mom doesn't care, I don't have any special someone, my dad's not here and....idk I just wish I had someone I could say to myself ""Come on, do it for them""

I know it's... Not the way I should think but when you break a leg you need crutches before the can walk on your own again",0.012181818181815627,1.766493309090908,2.4700000000000024,95.165,84.0909090909091,5.8181818181818175,18.18181818181818,6.980632752743323,-0.056636363636363374,384,9,94,5,11,132,68,110,0.07,0.8490000000000001,0.081,0.2657,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,3,1,0,5,7,0,1,4,0,17,1,1,0,0,15,27,4,0,5,5,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,6,3,1,0,1,1,20,4,10,22,1,12,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,3,67,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350687675998407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137274125131988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16705704448012793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4003302784371024,0.0,0.0,0.1691155200054147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15674853294585825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21578878854233985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22993199380560414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455715670533791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20511652496853552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515400325111099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15612451946368508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4990334084013097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052402015497602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476110211618997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042877060554847,0.12579632664196755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558326482489296,0.0,0.0,0.1765186215545647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22576261438055875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13946275348422574,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yesterday48,2020/02/07,"I need advice, dont know what to do So i will be short as much as i can.
Im 24 old male. I suffer from anxiety and depression disorders for 5 years. I have pure OCD and social anxiety. 
Ive managed to live my life for all those years but i feel like im permanently f***** up.
I never took any meds.
But 2 years ago i had the worst period in struggle, i first got extremely depressed and sucidal and then i startet obssesing about if im gay(i never ever doubted im straight, had gf etc)
Since then i got better. But all that got me loosing my libido, sexual part of brain. I feel asexual for two years. I still get occasional boners on girls but those moments are rare. 
I lost my attraction to them. 
Im feeling numb to life, cant do anything, feel dettached from life and my friends.
I just got into somethin with one girl. Eventhough im numb somethung in me just did it. Now i cried for whole month, because i cant enjoy it fully. 
I want numbness out of my life, i want to feel that sec drive in me again.
I just feel desentized to life. Cant feel much pleasure. Started doing nofap also.
I just want to succed with this girl and find pleasure in my life in generally.
I feel the best when im anxious and take some calming remedies. It seems like all my emotions are hidden inside that anxiety. But when im anxious intrusive thoughts are ther 24/7. 
Im succesaful guy for my age in terms that i hve friends, supportive family but i cant enjoy it because my illnes.
It seems since my sex drive is gone, my life drive dissapeared. It would be devastiing for me if i blow up another opportunity...

Please tell me if anybody nows what should i do. 
I started taking also maca pills and st johns wort...still waiting for more effects",0.8883707526305216,3.3574272881844403,2.757785671201664,89.6637825882984,87.35734870317003,5.9944775819315055,23.3435426579988,7.397020576406223,1.183256470745929,1347,53,277,24,43,447,182,347,0.156,0.7120000000000001,0.133,-0.8223,0,0,2,0,0,0,50.0,0,0,1,6,15,24,0,2,2,0,24,14,1,1,7,56,54,26,0,9,13,0,8,2,3,3,11,0,0,5,15,12,0,1,14,0,0,5,7,10,0,3,11,8,45,14,34,38,13,43,0,4,0,2,11,13,0,7,27,169,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647915598521394,0.0587745484455193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604666531764403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04508903432008353,0.06952558784696689,0.1521672727707729,0.1498094297241448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054562591734892765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083667887152955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958202011387145,0.05864055274171851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401725879441973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07283189628018764,0.0,0.0,0.1142151790811474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599019683333924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770786426665226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458314298093945,0.0,0.0,0.07394655335217643,0.0,0.0599758180588403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625055666595181,0.0,0.2682025987500621,0.04736763356193563,0.0,0.0,0.060600709448458724,0.05639819938566986,0.0,0.0,0.10245270423837327,0.0,0.0346411346409677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121176544198073,0.0,0.0,0.06565144350122841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6445778616598952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036438977259451125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3278276279142529,0.0647856289316415,0.0,0.0585476995409878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237871365948748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364886324603481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05292326794650578,0.0,0.09748222597664796,0.04916362019836778,0.1022755568508843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957495720591209,0.0,0.04492934687605192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718008354687812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278194691361803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12072145165241448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109694806850568,0.0,0.0,0.06758863908845482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386070956853787,0.0,0.052950507796496,0.0,0.0,0.06931539944698728,0.0,0.0,0.0752410613106889,0.0,0.0,0.09970480263959497,0.0,0.05795267072592704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052638017237669706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366625006909996,0.0,0.0,0.06476943205783288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732355702874643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402611490071155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047100501718188435,0.0,0.0,0.17079056256228967
mentalhealth,mimomomo,2020/02/07,"Does anyone else experience this really weird emotional feeling? I ran into this feeling tonight! I've experienced it plenty of times before, but this time, I want to figure it out. (Just for a little background, I'm diagnosed with anxiety and depression. I take meds for it and am doing pretty well.)

Often, I will consider making a decision, and all of a sudden, I just feel like I'm mentally mired in quicksand. Tonight, I was (am) trying to decide if I should order a pizza. I was in the middle of grading tests (I'm a teacher) and was texting my husband about whether or not we should spend money on pizza. This is something we are always talking about because we love ordering take-out and tend to spend too much money on it.

Anyway, we hit this conversation, and I began trying to make this decision, and all of a sudden, now I feel like I can't do ANYTHING. I feel like I can't move on to grade more tests, I can't go do my exercises (stretches, foam rolling, PT stuff), I can't decide what to eat if I don't order pizza, and the list goes on. I considered taking a minute for self-care: reading my tarot cards, meditating, or taking a bath, but I can't decide between those either.

Then, everything starts running through my mind like a movie reel on fast forward - all the things that I could be doing. Cleaning the house, going through mail, doing laundry, walking the dogs, etc., but I can't actually put words to them. It's like these blurry pictures just flashing through my mind that I don't get enough time with in order to realize what I'm thinking.

The best way I can describe the feeling is almost as though I can't form sentences or finish sentences in my mind. Like I'm mentally or emotionally glitching or something. What the hell is this? I'm so sick of it.",5.811447839251307,6.12676569942197,6.591783649876138,77.14866088631986,66.86127167630057,9.018221855216074,32.66116157445637,8.841846274778883,2.7151080649600883,1396,56,258,21,21,462,177,346,0.073,0.799,0.128,0.9581,0,0,2,0,0,0,57.0,4,0,1,1,12,12,1,0,17,0,29,8,0,2,3,61,57,23,0,6,16,1,6,6,0,3,3,0,2,0,22,16,4,0,14,3,4,8,10,3,1,0,5,7,34,9,36,46,10,40,1,1,0,1,10,15,1,9,20,179,56,5,0.0,0.0,0.10083547507495406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347037747414027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597909391112166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790474028262816,0.0,0.0,0.0722509539337977,0.10587411160209104,0.08503203920749555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298919670646706,0.0,0.0879264815087685,0.0,0.10843878331893338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825008429095611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899824290703975,0.10487808757891183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042504890009057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573270156884493,0.08631921331535591,0.2324653773408572,0.0,0.10676783014203868,0.11524060760259605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928666180933536,0.10107686879875302,0.0,0.0,0.3134814508529362,0.22145757813933006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053985821151878735,0.0,0.11744999061874352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922930209022242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30289181456943265,0.10356411450616927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325963729441808,0.0,0.13794756598491895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147766780865623,0.0,0.20826529392134852,0.0,0.3130024648947265,0.0,0.0,0.1098237646656521,0.07595966575007274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512407119719656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387549960695397,0.0,0.0,0.1033582706929923,0.0,0.06619604125683559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779604679286413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909743878896718,0.0,0.0,0.07313772387182363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828848115094352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107661281347786,0.08305298752338226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864806523154039,0.06620988909971821,0.10152150301674427,0.0,0.18075820074260174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030899276483302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060946892880404176,0.08201878889550099,0.0,0.0,0.09290635640280932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mikkkkkkkkey,2020/02/07,"Does anyone else feel this way? For the longest time, I've had a feeling that nothing really matters (a kind of "" meh"" type of feeling). When I'm with friends, I laugh, but I never truly feel happy. It's like my feelings are just turned off. Physically, I feel. Mentally, there is nothing.

Then, when I'm alone, I just feel at peace, until I get these extreme feelings of sadness, which sometimes make me cry, and sometimes make me just lay there and think about everything and nothing.

I can sometimes find myself in a state of mind, where I just get these really deep thoughts. I don't feel sad about it, even if the thoughts are sad. It feels empty, like it's just a sad thought flying by. And then suddenly I get happy, and then suddenly I'm sad again. Went to a therapist some time ago, but she had no answer. 

It's even affecting relationships. I can just suddenly flip out, as in saying things I don't mean, and only then realize that I've said it. Or I can sometimes get irrational for no apparent reason. This is just examples.

It's tearing om me, making me say and making me be someone I don't wanna be. Anyone else feel this way? And how do you deal with it?",2.8587662337662323,4.749668329004333,4.085928571428571,86.34032142857143,75.66666666666667,7.2174025974025975,26.268614718614717,8.07648339933343,1.6452941991341996,908,34,182,15,20,297,119,231,0.14400000000000002,0.733,0.12300000000000001,-0.6498,1,1,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,0,0,18,12,0,0,7,0,15,0,0,7,1,53,45,21,0,2,11,0,11,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,17,11,0,0,20,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,7,14,22,7,20,36,1,26,0,5,0,0,8,7,0,3,17,117,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196561119357892,0.0,0.0,0.09576698467094803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12930888249902842,0.1894848761358659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015696598422447,0.0,0.09532848035424926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091769995109396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448710922531664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12214596297825228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831025609580101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5142899767595759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845123326351321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07143907306337999,0.0,0.19323886603181128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19686374799625792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628920542384603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090348523508686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468873368414673,0.0,0.0,0.1007226812080574,0.0,0.0,0.09318407216110003,0.0,0.09336439348160508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131555026081571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26617112638665763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032462940772588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184722921253625,0.0950705424574798,0.0,0.09927397800034532,0.0,0.0,0.0879564277138866,0.1470654948493465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834621942046016,0.0,0.3658053161112153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107360259269088,0.06143036262846133,0.059248537934280726,0.0,0.22022324470445126,0.10783544330767704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057655544608653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467905592737063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571699336965445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jimbo-Darkness,2020/02/07,"Depressed on solo backpacking trip Hi guys. I’ve been backpacking in Mexico for 2 months on a trip of undetermined length and I am very alone.  I should mention I didn’t take this trip with the intention of magically shedding my depression, I took this trip with the intention to grow. 

That said Im experiencing some debilitating mental health issues. Although my symptoms of depression come and go, this past 10 days have been bad. I will begin my day around 8 am and by 1 pm feel so powerless to my sadness that it can take me hours or the rest of the day to recover. 

This afternoon I am, once again, paralyzed by misery.  Once again I’ve needed to rush back to my hostel so that I can cry alone. These moments where I feel completely overcome with emotional pain seem involuntary and almost out of my control. 

I’ve been meditating, exercising, eating well and not drinking. 

Every decision I make is with the goal of being happier, but travelling alone involves a ton of decision making. At this point in my trip I feel incapable of making any definitive choices (where to go next, what to do today, how to get help etc...) and as a result am stuck in my current headspace. 

I don’t know what I can do to get on a different page, one with less suffering. I hope this makes sense. Does anyone know what I can do to gain some momentum again? 

It might be worth adding that I don’t have any plans to go back home unless I have to. I’d rather be depressed in Mexico than my hometown.",4.614768564768563,6.0395214825174826,5.72982017982018,78.23963869463874,70.18881118881119,9.643423243423245,29.00366300366301,9.957137785484203,2.8660907758907763,1168,44,224,30,21,388,159,286,0.139,0.795,0.066,-0.955,3,3,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,4,13,10,0,0,9,0,27,6,0,9,0,44,51,14,0,4,5,0,3,0,0,3,4,1,1,1,16,14,2,1,8,3,1,13,4,8,1,1,7,5,26,2,41,38,7,43,0,6,0,0,6,13,0,8,17,148,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713754473638927,0.33243592244778153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455171528273322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481165139523785,0.0,0.0,0.09524601852500177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16454127342020872,0.0893342776099018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216457446736474,0.11217961217216214,0.0,0.12000119885118354,0.0,0.0,0.1175262493589022,0.2070039549879732,0.0,0.3686099718074789,0.0,0.0,0.11178440180619968,0.0,0.0,0.09362986739122396,0.0,0.0,0.10481192831160002,0.0,0.10948004946886894,0.0,0.12035217408355472,0.0,0.0,0.11932493196477928,0.0,0.0,0.09014580507177884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16229588498978134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179834209526598,0.0,0.1824189289444074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059394072346316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372803600408428,0.0,0.0,0.07171482482203366,0.0,0.10732221217521412,0.10626770483307993,0.10536607134087138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557027189362892,0.1116723839632994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760057190609195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856733276280737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782328618696836,0.1135021462911321,0.0,0.0,0.08540040151695209,0.0,0.0,0.07933359121381983,0.0,0.0,0.11378774925853324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278870647273153,0.07250089444566479,0.0,0.11384757524337652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213645821026557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114250593651757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177437900526536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097401963662244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120618563609982,0.16089010578856486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141639012781484,0.0,0.11887261649277467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828002674222614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619911667847733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rionchou,2020/02/07,"I've gotta get this out. I feel like I'm going to have another breakdown and I'm scared. I tried posting this in r/advice, but neglected to read that they remove posts that mention suicide.

To give some context, I've been dealing with anxiety and depression for many years - since I was a kid. Although I can function, I have been absolutely miserable for most of my life. I can't find joy in anything. I just fake anything positive - in reality, I'm almost always scared. I worry all the time and cannot stop it - I've gotten so worked up from the anxiety that I've actually (mildly) dissociated many times. The real world is terrifying. I feel like a burden on everyone, and I feel like an idiot with no potential. I know it's illogical, but it doesn't make a difference. I can't just talk my way out of it, and experiences in my life don't encourage me. If anything, it makes me feel worse because I continue to feel awful despite positive events in my life.

It all kind of came to a head a few years ago. I was going to go into a medical program at community college. I did very well in my coursework, and made it into the program. I immediately dropped it; I had very intense anxiety for almost a year and just knew that if I kept going, I would have a breakdown - if what I was having wasn't the beginning of a breakdown, or a mini one (I wasn't really...functioning). I knew it wasn't for me, despite doing well in the classes. Despite working hard for it, dropping my place in the program was an easy decision.

I had been passively suicidal for a few years before then, but this time it just got more intense. I researched methods. I probably wouldn't have gone through with anything, or I would have picked a shoddy method like slitting my wrists or overdosing - one with a high chance of failure. I posted on Reddit asking for advice then, too. Someone suggested making a drastic change in my life, since I really had nothing to lose. I decided they were right, and instead of taking any plans I had further, I chose to get my bachelor's degree so I could teach abroad. I've definitely still had my moments where the suicidal ideation has gotten more intense, at times it's been more active than passive. But I chose to keep going. I wish I knew why.
I worked to gain experience to help me teach. I took courses that were terrifying because I knew they would help me be a better teacher and a better individual. I pushed myself to get out of my comfort zone. It's been so hard making it through these past few years, but I've somehow made it through.

I was successful; I'm going to be leaving in about a week to teach overseas. I've prepared for this specific job for a full year, and I've invested a lot of time and money into it. I am literally about to leave my job, sell my car, etc so I can move across the world in 10 (!) days. I'm not ready for this at all. Despite everything I've done, I'm convinced that I'm going to fail or have another breakdown - but this time, I'll be on my own. I feel like I'm delusional for even trying to make this big move. I thought I had a handle on my mental illnesses, but they are really really overpowering me right now.
People tell me not to discount the hard work I've put into this. They say I worked hard and remind me that I graduated with highest honors from community college and university. They point out that I've done all of this on my own. I wish I could say I felt proud, but in reality I know that my ""success"" was fueled by anxiety. Every single assignment and class felt like torture, like life-or-death. I had to continue to do well, or else I may as well drop out.

I wish I attempted suicide a few years ago instead of choosing to do something like this. Maybe then I could have actually gotten help for this anxiety and depression. I've gotten therapy multiple times and tried about five medications since the medical program fiasco, but I still feel like I struggle to cope. It's silly, because I function very well.
I just don't know if I can handle the stress of leaving my life and going across the world. I've been crying for the past two weeks. I can't focus at my job. I've been obsessing over this move at unhealthy levels.

If I don't figure out a way to manage this soon, I will have a breakdown overseas. I'll be out thousands of dollars to return home, and I'll have to deal with the shame from ruining my life and showing that I can't be a real adult. I'll have to deal with it without any insurance, since leaving this job means I'm also out of insurance.

I'm so, so scared.",4.34142629886022,5.3225308997797365,5.781613173903924,79.28188203622125,70.39867841409692,8.936885532480249,30.49199356688344,9.23628265651192,2.6337238794489903,3579,146,700,72,63,1212,331,908,0.168,0.687,0.145,-0.9887,5,0,3,0,0,2,116.0,0,0,6,16,31,44,2,8,41,1,72,12,2,8,4,124,136,50,4,15,27,0,13,9,0,7,10,2,1,2,44,39,0,4,23,2,5,18,17,18,5,5,46,15,100,26,110,75,19,112,0,7,0,0,23,51,0,17,44,463,144,28,0.0,0.0,0.08862766738463049,0.0,0.0,0.08874870182821087,0.08050685748240853,0.0,0.09094357112041844,0.0,0.0,0.03631454429261166,0.037784948856156665,0.0,0.0,0.06176102677149744,0.09523317048305023,0.1736935071734172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14947499939514136,0.0,0.0424524348481871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304496364562353,0.0,0.03864076086152931,0.0,0.0,0.08032331591017261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051937205364709915,0.0,0.0,0.04803800185131697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087691200776082,0.0,0.04988100503602958,0.029285841468206456,0.14044785862272707,0.07822352861746819,0.0,0.0,0.04744402497196038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294086217612954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037934420009077416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064440977847129,0.029993028449204238,0.0,0.038260077057600254,0.043391420500294764,0.040811786394595914,0.08883983639207245,0.0,0.0,0.16072543596185904,0.16220538589014116,0.0872018835926294,0.0,0.04150412727902335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117491235567085,0.04356163016254443,0.20646144018557772,0.0,0.03631870900230641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16271458536724104,0.0,0.04660399653377744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131255930362622,0.047978400882952285,0.04555016292268152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802505842940855,0.04036269864003508,0.0,0.0472877663282721,0.07486882400510382,0.0,0.0,0.19233150617220948,0.0,0.0,0.2245221172881749,0.19966630029187976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050802431558284816,0.0,0.0386061534140358,0.0,0.08593651464954488,0.15155840473730633,0.09207769101657452,0.045620679293146664,0.04946505261891087,0.0,0.13723808710228455,0.04576283094740007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14479166303049892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04357234012715948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061542293754598125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866984050650737,0.03148173559958442,0.0,0.04744402497196038,0.0,0.042927344959076894,0.0,0.13047134254512374,0.0,0.04895990805797693,0.0,0.0,0.04564982324789045,0.0,0.0,0.045422518362807925,0.10337356594831593,0.08727286784233125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756017610966935,0.0,0.0722240745966873,0.13639068545420627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025524508903745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03847594027129395,0.03495901337365127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725293362099602,0.0379649853728256,0.05201726470735149,0.04747263171053969,0.0,0.1986856836957079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03414284136890496,0.03649902253175625,0.039690542303203666,0.0,0.051930555213844286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03605065001764979,0.1853534908619859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050452436066555785,0.09249169550143917,0.0,0.044359196061964916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240458576353586,0.0,0.0720890533427578,0.07285069434063779,0.0,0.20414625029200992,0.0,0.04097566920363313,0.0,0.15665856930906985,0.043773840972359264,0.0,0.1652959403095665,0.046116292535242034,0.046276903578679265,0.09677437290796943,0.0,0.0,0.20469889370144526
mentalhealth,hrjrlcndjsksksos,2020/02/07,"What should I do? Should I be talking to someone?

I’m 20 years old. I live with my girlfriend who I love and work full time. For the past, maybe, 6 months, I’ve been feeling really down and unmotivated. I don’t even feel like myself anymore. I haven’t told a single soul about the way I’m feeling. I try my hardest to act like the happy self I always have been around my coworkers, family and friends. But deep down I’m sad and anxious constantly. I feel like I never do good enough at anything no matter how hard I try, and I don’t know what has changed to make me feel this way. I should be proud of the accomplishments I’ve achieved as I’m quite young with my own house and a good career, but I feel like I’m never enough and I’m truly just constantly upset and anxious. No matter how much sleep I get, I wake up feeling mentally and physically tired, even though I drink coffee throughout the day. I can’t focus on anything and find myself second guessing if I’ve done something at work even if I had done it ten seconds prior. It’s the most unusual thing and I’ve never experienced this feeling before in my life until the past 6 months or so. I don’t know how to tell anyone how I’m feeling because I don’t want anyone to think less of me but I don’t think I can keep this charade or being happy going much longer because it seems to just make how I’m actually feeling deep down first. Does anyone at all know what this could possibly be and what could be causing this?",4.666315789473681,4.9409974736842095,5.555263157894737,83.73184210526317,69.32894736842105,8.110526315789475,28.171052631578945,7.85451343220497,1.592403947368421,1168,37,243,13,19,384,148,304,0.083,0.779,0.138,0.9001,0,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,7,14,13,0,1,9,0,27,6,2,8,4,64,60,28,0,8,9,0,11,4,2,3,2,0,0,1,14,15,1,1,17,1,0,2,12,2,0,4,6,12,32,11,24,44,10,34,1,1,0,1,8,13,0,7,21,156,46,5,0.0,0.0,0.08379589832560459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145000711454466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19401538336376425,0.08515911768426518,0.18012510731756112,0.0,0.14132597890878468,0.07644174398159963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469006704045672,0.0,0.07306831746625034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821126521609604,0.09083816911097517,0.0,0.0,0.18558807941162087,0.0,0.13711904940374295,0.0,0.0,0.05537849446944088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514466707364062,0.17574789604708835,0.0,0.08411907095213621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774515612164734,0.0,0.17014728040844254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094978734079789,0.0,0.4341801957282314,0.1840348021111001,0.0,0.0,0.07848284248467345,0.07304025050349157,0.0,0.0,0.06634228808581702,0.0,0.0448630839186748,0.0,0.04880141371335692,0.1440459288597785,0.0,0.0,0.09459454371490077,0.0,0.0,0.18281860224634194,0.07692188711428698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990814638197372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632444114114037,0.0,0.0,0.1415743085477443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06065191626086485,0.16780530647209574,0.0,0.07582402784943301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750025552809525,0.0,0.1146366415683014,0.0,0.0862670973163054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653590108646309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13707986390992388,0.0,0.12624740297615747,0.0,0.19868273386767332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901052224795096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16394362957328298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968045584246615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133240509027712,0.0,0.0,0.055009972815540376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817204419542101,0.08958024514926471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593115823752479,0.0,0.07275664753678264,0.06610626267548463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901836573858396,0.07505341718841467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057047644096640364,0.11004296119050284,0.08436599855685799,0.0,0.05007098873912251,0.09869394981975936,0.0,0.08205164747632299,0.0,0.11659902512632947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064784625918211,0.13631786015720834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502751988454255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055296913771468455
mentalhealth,esper_98,2020/02/07,"What should I do about tics brought on by anxiety? So I've been dealing with anxiety and depression for almost my whole life now, but recently I think it's been giving me tics, which is something that has never happened before. It used to be if a thought popped into my head that made me anxious or whatever and I wanted to scream or curse or move etc. I could keep it inside, but beginning sometime around last year it got noticeably harder to keep it in, and it kept getting harder until I just started to let it out, but only at home and in privacy. Then it started happening more frequently and feeling more involuntary and since the beginning of this year every time I've been out in public I've let out a loud scream or a swear or hit myself at least once and it happens so fast I don't have time to think and stop it. It's embarrassing and kinda scary. The weird thing is that I can't say my mental health is any worse than it's been, it's definitely not THE WORST it's been so I can't see any logical change that would make this happen. Is this something that's common with severe anxiety? Is there anything I can do to help it? Any insight would be appreciated. I'm a 21 year old male if that helps any.",3.481611039794608,4.9314650772357735,4.665164741121097,84.67634788189989,73.02439024390246,7.943175010697478,25.955498502353443,8.532816995589336,1.6954910569105697,963,32,197,17,19,317,137,246,0.16,0.7440000000000001,0.096,-0.9202,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,1,7,0,26,3,1,3,1,49,52,24,0,7,12,0,1,0,0,3,2,4,1,1,27,16,0,4,6,0,0,2,5,6,0,0,10,6,15,0,25,33,6,33,0,1,1,0,7,11,0,9,20,134,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031543166112152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996668920823646,0.0,0.2528302856530465,0.12445633092121275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065731022914897,0.098071181987989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374323355984268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11654112204036797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795866334061839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357640757498777,0.09488589703681287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12286431810638307,0.0,0.0,0.09281968728517033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05570328824665968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575572382099217,0.10568135770433354,0.0,0.0,0.08810989081700042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896780593724829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130621973916041,0.1171014084243886,0.0,0.0,0.14768402386315466,0.0,0.11050557665910367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958413758609722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980007189401229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22530459423517785,0.07781357158689818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042418237179646,0.07353672451823545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102151340225797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708912542402512,0.0,0.0,0.08496688474165827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542483044549746,0.11560078579556375,0.11732329678281818,0.0,0.08378628026472905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087757292401934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760850126403018,0.0,0.0,0.0877881152409411,0.0,0.0,0.12445633092121275,0.0,0.09113053301699127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696224858227676,0.10895708586078567,0.0,0.15595225950825542,0.0,0.0,0.09210378914779853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318945898898324,0.14117997197982265,0.0,0.08745957453320545,0.12847747299263731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514813556719978,0.0,0.0,0.06497881771221192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299651189994235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122686635531937,0.15651766752434915,0.0,0.0,0.21283006161507256
mentalhealth,derferico,2020/02/07,"[venting] that feeling of being insignificant, is that a sign of the ‘dragon’ sneaking back? Just need a corner to flush it off the system. Don’t need an answer or anything, as I don’t think there is an “answer”. I am just delighted to have a place to let it out. 

Haven’t had this feeling in a long long time but it is now back stronger than ever. 
That feeling of being insignificant to people. That feeling that if I am not making the first step, “friends” just forget about my existence. No contact, no calls, no whatsapp, no “let’s go for coffee or a beer”, no “let’s do something”. I go to work, get back home, Netflix, PS4, bed and back again. Very lonely. I am getting very angry at my people and I am actually pushing my “friends” away as I am fed up with always having to be the active one, the initiator. 
Not even my family calls to ask how I am doing, And they bitch me because “I never call them”. I have this thought that if I didn’t have kids and an ex-wife that care about me, no one would notice if I were to disappear or die in my apartment. 
I have been recently “ghosted” for no apparent reason by 2 very good friends, which didn’t really help. 
This whole thing doesn’t really help in my non-existing love life. I am now dreading dates as I know that even when the go super well, I’ll get dropped, if I am lucky, after the second date. I am now starting to see some lady, but I am always thinking “she’ll ghost me very soon”. 

Golfing and fishing are what are keeping me “safe” as these are 2 activities I can do on my own and that I love. 

Leaving all this aside, I am terrified that this is the first step to letting the “dark dragon” back in my life.",3.420483234714005,4.330423390532548,4.704866863905328,86.41497287968443,72.49112426035504,7.4084812623274185,26.50936883629191,7.645422480735847,1.3283132149901389,1278,42,271,15,24,424,172,338,0.156,0.662,0.182,0.8998,1,2,2,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,2,4,23,14,1,1,17,0,45,6,0,3,3,47,70,21,3,7,14,0,4,0,3,2,2,0,2,1,22,8,2,2,11,3,0,7,16,3,1,5,7,5,36,11,35,54,4,45,0,1,1,2,16,13,1,9,23,208,58,1,0.0,0.0,0.09035548186480154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15408629661066653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619452252125422,0.0,0.08656010747513439,0.0,0.08699231385727449,0.3559839062610333,0.0,0.056442628117326726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836373598139557,0.0,0.0944027186416383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609486345851707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12231099466271253,0.08375388108429149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728657593251278,0.0,0.18726721276375866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15751575343520674,0.0,0.0,0.21460678366553795,0.0,0.14512496362274574,0.0,0.15786483610283858,0.0776609569970518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12412362173362285,0.0,0.09287634530733092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229915539030848,0.0,0.0,0.05088560468199278,0.0,0.0,0.09804052408687622,0.0,0.3787223763026365,0.13079955533096782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388028306694793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16713402619485007,0.0,0.0618052267189635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13731014042118378,0.07141190486067953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541549317918324,0.0,0.0,0.12548414668591842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283819138642486,0.0,0.09673791186093124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863236030489616,0.09519899248056488,0.091422464778719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378305739401532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128109296131784,0.0,0.0,0.06553640252124764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061513361329150126,0.1186571775334661,0.0,0.07350692960805477,0.05399057000846138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3055891629988215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325044925745495,0.0,0.0,0.10337457037174057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740736737275971,0.0,0.0,0.06577400605099641,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zrina94,2020/02/07,"Told my mom I needed space, now I'm a wreck (vent) So my mom and I have a usually good relationship. It was horrible from when I started puberty until I moved out at 20 basically. But after that we really bonded and became close. She's now turned 60, I'm 25 and finished my master and looking for a job.

For the last couple of weeks I've been feeling a lot like I need a break from her. At first I had a hard time figuring out why, but thinking a lot about it I think it has several possible reasons.
One is that I feel like she expects me to share every little detail of my life, and then telling me what to do, even though I already had it all figured out.
Another is how I often feel that I have to be in tear/total wreck mode for her to truly listen to my issues. But at the same time she expects me to listen to all kinds of things. Often mental health stuff of people I know, a topic that is known to be a trigger of my own bad mental health. And its also often the same topics, for instance Tupperware (she became a saleswoman again after a very long break). I don't mind tw, but because I've shown interest it just seems like it's all we can talk about sometimes. 
And well I just feel like I need a breather from her. No questions for a while, I'll tell her when I have news etc.
I'm aware that her questions are based in the fact that she cares, but I just can't help feeling smothered.

Because of these feelings I've been taking a bit of distance for at least the last week. I guess she noticed, because when she called me tonight she ended up asking me why I've been pulling away. I was a bit taken a back to didn't have the true reasons ready (I'm the type that rehearses and writes things down when I'm gonna have a serious conversation) so I said I didn't know why, but that I just needed a break. I could hear that it upset her, but she said okay and that it would be up to me to decide when I wanted to spend time with her again.

The reason I'm a wreck now is that I know I upset her. And I hate upsetting her. I love my mom. But I also feel like I needed to tell her, since I've gotten a pit in my stomach every time she's texted me for a while now. But I just can't seem to get past the fear of having hurt her feelings. Because I can so put myself in her spot, I would feel awful is someone said that to me. And I really don't know what to do right now. I feel like crap, I'm mad and sad at the same time, and my head is just a mess.
Anyone who has some support or a good piece of advice?
Please don't tell me I'm an asshole, I already know that.",3.001009466817088,3.416137156079856,4.459217148182667,89.6162814538677,73.08348457350272,7.1908765389709135,24.147790258498066,7.001395882987947,0.7002782263206946,1987,51,457,17,37,665,230,551,0.129,0.757,0.114,-0.8998,1,0,0,0,0,0,54.0,2,0,0,2,33,30,4,4,34,2,39,7,3,5,5,95,93,39,0,11,16,3,11,6,0,3,3,6,0,0,29,20,0,0,28,0,1,3,8,13,1,2,15,18,79,17,57,71,15,62,0,2,1,1,50,20,1,12,42,311,108,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437017385789498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538462715346098,0.10535696777674276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06907341307254904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046059819196525936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061582210343951636,0.0,0.061889698690642925,0.05065214550646439,0.05500106732072828,0.16062187991553242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383215401014288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726353152339358,0.0,0.06716174743775905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05259410016173937,0.07288704113426113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834378142019193,0.0,0.07346562586754163,0.04350838752632576,0.0,0.11100141236009947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412525527751637,0.33307285605716674,0.1882382714401144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603140143581405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03441583849134958,0.0,0.0,0.11050202059138796,0.0,0.0,0.07256635644032866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900912313950717,0.0650357887662185,0.06760453499722963,0.14003949059350826,0.07424347470453348,0.0,0.0441531740498869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051823434082331,0.0,0.0,0.06875412744761321,0.06536862630090454,0.0,0.0,0.06859642287037497,0.18100994224769387,0.10739030804584927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046527932810162535,0.19309284453128356,0.06602188801234744,0.0,0.058295387779839725,0.055316592517664485,0.0,0.0,0.1120054606345175,0.05945280717055164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276865232420648,0.0,0.06651278705758433,0.23144841138852745,0.0,0.07001240078597068,0.0,0.24421936953474616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499666143941308,0.0,0.0,0.04463713910165471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288307651016266,0.045667930958948735,0.0,0.0,0.07230859370012495,0.0,0.0742617260554115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622039530756982,0.1475853061221081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843996522069271,0.2031847423879824,0.0,0.07072277463460651,0.0,0.05625504280944159,0.18798045792582085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993631344849914,0.0,0.07441755576576757,0.0,0.05449069141407712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05581384095968594,0.0,0.06514992008123335,0.0,0.046625133019950527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540863833903633,0.0,0.07475171471213866,0.0,0.0,0.049528175390624714,0.05294609110024297,0.23030305173516125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875259716474686,0.08441730814376137,0.06471972782249212,0.0,0.1920549047265236,0.0,0.0,0.06294431859863317,0.0,0.0,0.07165073071126292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254962342672512,0.054351989223302234,0.03885350592372305,0.0,0.10567843278321802,0.0,0.059227591403739815,0.0,0.1783199683768015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935883467325956,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaliKop,2020/02/07,"Ask a Law Enforcement Officer anything! Hi. I am a sworn officer in the United States. I am verified in the Protect and Serve subreddit. 

Ask me anything related to mental health and I'll give me opinion from a Law Enforcement perspective. 

Thank You.",3.253333333333334,6.386896444444448,4.90388888888889,73.2625,84.55555555555556,10.111111111111112,34.16666666666667,9.725611199111238,5.025000000000002,200,12,31,8,6,67,31,45,0.0,0.815,0.185,0.8016,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,4,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,0,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5174140077206069,0.0,0.5878035669157508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015808360789681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.334170012817726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31681993458371666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894378037321682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,darksoul1622,2020/02/07,Experiencing mood swings Hi this my first time posting here I want to Know if there is something wrong I for a while have been experiencing something weird I have sudden happiness surges like one minute I am sitting trying to study and the next I am very very Happy to may even say ecstatic and I want to dance and like I am high and after a couple of minutes it is gone and it is so random like I was one time watching a sad movie crying a little boom happiness surge walking in the street nothing to make me happy boom happiness surge I don't understand why but it really is weird is something wrong I don't drink or do drugs,2.256153846153847,4.6659441269841295,3.5487301587301587,86.883021978022,79.95238095238095,6.416605616605617,22.3907203907204,7.61054688173877,1.0258713064713059,504,16,100,8,13,164,77,126,0.107,0.725,0.168,0.5975,0,0,5,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,4,14,0,0,6,0,16,2,0,1,0,15,22,10,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,1,1,3,0,0,4,5,1,0,2,2,0,3,2,5,0,3,3,6,12,8,9,18,0,16,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,4,10,63,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935970484788124,0.13834859772270874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233816563161221,0.14606036326976224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318784724581015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071317952381214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.670373010996122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13307158663583274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692180440682293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18459633841185336,0.12623356201210512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407165314071655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133947740473425,0.0,0.0,0.1208510564639829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706920306725517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062392134426705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068588351086467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015936362002527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908841035492727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688325617704526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551081628753016,0.0,0.0,0.13111691045106097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20784153282068624,0.14857546783553732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364900067625942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754099943770261,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,im-failing-at-life,2020/02/07,"I feel like like shit every week, but when the weekends come, life is not that bad. During the weeks I’m just so unmotivated, I can never concentrate on anything and I just can’t do any schoolwork. Sometimes I even think about suicide, when I feel like I can’t take it anymore.

When the weekend finally arrives, almost all of that goes away. I usually don’t do any schoolwork or any other things that could be useful to do. I just sleep, eat, chill, game, and listen to music. I don’t have the energy to do anything else, but I’m okay with just being at home. When I’m at home I feel so much better than I do at school.",2.7957480314960605,4.185143889763779,4.136228346456694,88.02796456692914,74.66929133858268,6.654803149606299,23.723622047244092,7.1686216300943375,0.8137155905511808,482,14,102,5,10,159,75,127,0.095,0.7290000000000001,0.17600000000000002,0.8367,0,0,0,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,0,1,12,7,1,0,4,1,15,4,2,1,2,21,26,11,1,1,8,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,6,4,1,0,4,3,0,1,6,2,0,0,0,4,11,5,12,23,2,17,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,2,14,68,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15824332565949945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223956400236253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567224126907522,0.0,0.0,0.2600889839252004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14847355014351107,0.0,0.13194770534608244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976390503507002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361280847679794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617338479299248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617032307763543,0.13201304292861488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437673625368447,0.0,0.13314634028537856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397127976455453,0.22579205445232825,0.0,0.17311316478499744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31703216297380793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162063334149054,0.2316151212673717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616957836342676,0.0,0.1218817912415962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993389533568247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16221460970904428,0.0,0.0,0.15814323598592248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562948298452324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728581963606288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188182231930678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498751823964454,0.10125867227366184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648641151771865,0.1740467376579632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253522838547912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NyxHell,2020/02/07,"My sister has bipolar disorder and I don't know what to do Hi, sorry if there any mistake, I'm French and it's the first time I post on reddit or on any social network in english.

My sister (19) was diagnosed with bipolar disorder recently, and this week she was admitted to the hospital because she had some dark thought. She came by herself in the emergency room because her therapist told her that if she had any suicidal thought, she should go. 
On the week day, she's 2 hours away from home to be near her university, and live in a small student room. I'm (21F) live close by to, but we don't live together.

She was out of the hospital but was re-admitted 2 days after, so my mom came to pick her up.
My mom saw scar along her thighs, and I don't know if she has any on her arms.
She's really tired all the time, because of the medication and her general state of mind.

I don't know what to do to help her. I'm afraid she will kill herself.
I have depression, and had it since my teens, but it's not the same, I never try to scar myself.
I'm afraid that telling her that we love her will not be enough for her to not go through.

What can I do to help her? What can my family do to help?
What should I expect of someone with this mental disorder? (She doesn't have the maniac part of the disorder)",3.6342722427224285,4.126128173431738,4.9554674046740494,86.34992107421076,71.69372693726937,9.121853218532186,27.601681016810176,9.2995712137729,2.0178239442394417,1009,34,228,21,18,337,125,271,0.11,0.815,0.07400000000000001,-0.8442,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,2,0,0,1,2,7,2,2,11,0,28,8,2,1,2,43,45,15,2,7,10,4,0,0,0,4,5,0,3,0,13,16,0,0,6,0,0,4,9,6,0,1,13,1,42,1,36,26,5,32,0,1,1,1,40,15,0,5,11,156,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838471630909726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980405535242177,0.0,0.0,0.19083294572655685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23869791634438384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459463765454524,0.0,0.08987677118444834,0.10591337055314816,0.0,0.0,0.4783779940982332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782176733038644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983721876130049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876032244014449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860937460846695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20983144442209925,0.0,0.1046718715653023,0.0,0.10276403796752212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544815991169445,0.0,0.17204460813476516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764297129691982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941802310705176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512196155713507,0.10516057146758744,0.0,0.10536406861760804,0.24442764945698214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048139393379675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300121949106245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09993875421124246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684948218102753,0.0,0.1030333446028277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631965676318855,0.0,0.0,0.10637200237116312,0.08841568108696536,0.0,0.0,0.11681163147232695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414230505038288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120677248443876,0.0,0.0,0.1211587555234436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656849840426853,0.12169501267438575,0.11993533357986665,0.0,0.09971119535516032,0.0,0.07084701240122923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740705262481698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-boywithapple-,2020/02/07,"I feel like a burden I think I need help but afraid to ask for it again. I have had some awful things happen to me but I think when it all happened I was so emotional I didn't really work through it in a healthy manner. I talked down all what happened and kind of joked about. I went to a psychologist for a year and a half but had to stop going when they started a new job some where else. I felt fine about dealing about it on my own and for a while I was fine but now I think I need help. I feel fine and super happy and can get a lot done in one day and another I feel so miserable my thoughts go to suicide.

My good days are so wonderful and feel like I have just started remembering and being able to do things that I love, which I have not been able to do. Then I feel like my life has purpose which is a feeling I think I never have felt  before but the other miserable days just feel awful. 
  
I'm sorry if it's too long or hard to understand but what should i do I'm quite lost. 

Female, English is not my first language",2.550863636363637,3.4019435863636365,3.932500000000001,91.35875,74.5,7.136363636363638,23.29545454545455,7.413659706084162,0.6741363636363631,799,21,187,9,16,264,117,220,0.146,0.627,0.228,0.9618,1,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,1,5,14,17,0,3,10,2,21,2,0,0,3,47,53,23,1,4,12,0,10,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,13,8,0,1,17,1,0,3,4,5,0,3,12,10,29,12,20,39,6,25,0,3,0,1,7,5,0,6,20,134,42,2,0.2193283437718328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499244601767447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252119713829863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331613312699948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21217295572749728,0.11305894587675135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222452242653076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161034381149816,0.12335743297765348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3881465024164194,0.2350323189217089,0.21058960529828608,0.0,0.0,0.0932802885841923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057295003588614085,0.0,0.12464935218919825,0.09198110439651253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909269950816794,0.1167395501695482,0.09823755777122298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470111655871948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882476913745624,0.0,0.0,0.1141983594417462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745904775788365,0.16072912509652118,0.0,0.0,0.0970493411887984,0.0,0.0,0.11971139807745515,0.09323255730950816,0.09897619670217024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16262918780746113,0.0845797699401688,0.10591434056812646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431128100097274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664134563040884,0.0,0.0,0.07025367662172631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242281289940593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276006208829225,0.15524173059849333,0.0,0.0,0.0916841581331887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995480482785065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881439073568988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457120058515825,0.281073493197247,0.0,0.08706110287054868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416427044798153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165978601656832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892611644989907,0.0798368232269306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062013121342184
mentalhealth,Supastudier,2020/02/07,"Addiction Hi, I’m a broke 20 year old pre-med student majoring in biochemistry. And since I was 17 I’ve been struggling with findom, or financial domination. For those of you who dont know, I basically have a fetish for sending money to hot girls. And it return, they’ll humiliate me, call me “loser”, “weak”, “worthless”, “pathetic” and basically bully me but it makes me so hard. If you’re curious, go to twitter and look at the tag “findom”. I’ve tried twice to quit this fetish and have been unsuccessful, I’ve spent a total of maybe 500 dollars on it. I’ve never had a girlfriend. And I have low self esteem. I just sent like 100 on a girl like 7 minutes ago. She’s was super hot, perfect body, beautiful face, wickedly innocent smile, she wasn’t a dominatrix though but I just wanted to “protect her”, I just wanted to give to her, to provide for her. So I sent her 160 bucks, and she texted thanks and then we went our separate ways. This is just one instance, I’ve also had interactions with professional “dommes”. I just feel like this is the worse fetish to have, I literally get off on losing money, on people stepping on me, telling me I’m a loser, I get off on feeling like shit, I have all of these negatives thoughts and my sexual reward circuits just reinforces these negative affirmations further and further. I’ve lost time and money to this fetish, and I can’t stop. I’m so depressed, no one knows about this fetish. It’s so embarrassing, I just want to be better, I hate my self for hating my self. I freaking hate this fetish. What are things I can do to leave this all behind? I can’t afford therapy, and university and government therapy services take months to schedule. I don’t want my friends to know either. I’m so ashamed and I just want this fetish to stop. Like my horny reptilian brain craves it, but my actual self hates it. It’s so stupid. Please help.",2.90817261330762,5.114641363387982,4.212606878817103,84.0334136933462,76.62295081967213,7.58457087753134,25.51880424300868,8.4952907291091,1.833547348119576,1473,54,290,30,34,484,192,366,0.245,0.585,0.17,-0.9859,1,0,0,0,0,0,54.0,2,1,1,9,17,30,6,3,9,0,23,6,4,1,5,51,55,29,0,6,14,0,5,5,2,1,2,0,0,6,21,18,0,3,6,0,6,6,9,19,0,3,13,6,42,11,35,40,5,31,0,8,1,0,29,13,1,2,16,177,63,4,0.0,0.0,0.09800199845026167,0.10947995555585513,0.0,0.0,0.08902223374542592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031121699370505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881927860276423,0.0,0.11155145368833963,0.0,0.11210944001892786,0.10254691625873956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649739247986278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769937565774907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155754092772999,0.1434897471250511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758943986625187,0.0,0.10493763939585296,0.0963384671550295,0.05707482307216469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08996262123085444,0.39660240450568657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731391794789414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16557570769133229,0.0,0.0,0.1063374030144794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24531712937969385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433315724219605,0.1123518189243904,0.10962763536262188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703561984421759,0.0,0.10089214515787144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015965506009458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745528267956542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10538095599243844,0.0,0.13610349804173222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962324733319243,0.0,0.0,0.11023838824720446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068161855289882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4190679124736961,0.0,0.10308659170313696,0.08307402604005094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16792248052856154,0.0,0.10498781964181446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550840015683903,0.0,0.08777738555179801,0.09245943711414747,0.2296934283287237,0.0,0.06671905475165382,0.0,0.09866874900841778,0.07972760316093636,0.05855963190163878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818315519055043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961714266320352,0.07971406111048057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309658170774772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234341411962104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467151932279981
mentalhealth,lunar_icarus,2020/02/07,"Need advice on how to handle a situation about mental health discrimination So recently, I need the advice I can get from this. Sorry it’s long. Some background context:

I attend university, I was a previous transfer student. I joined this club that caters to my ethnicity. It is more of a social club than a cultural one. I joined because my boyfriend introduced me to it and I was interested by how they ran the club. It’s been over a year since joining the club. I was worried to be around new people especially cause my boyfriend knew a lot of people from his club (he was previously Treasurer and now he’s internal Vice President) and I have diagnosed social anxiety/GAD/depression. His friend initially were very nice to me and I felt the need to maybe be friends with them because they seem to be good people. His friends are on the same executive board for this club so they’re almost like a team... but it’s more of a group of friends. Time goes by, it’s now spring semester of 2020. My bf is internal VP still and they handed out applications for new interns to be on the e-board. I applied, wanting to spread new ideas for this club such as more community work, connecting with our rival university who has the same cultural club, and bringing more cultural stuff into general meetings. I thought my interview was fine and did my BF. I wanted to go by the mission statement that the club has established in its development. 

This past Tuesday, they voted for interns during the weekly executive board meeting. I didn’t make the cut and I asked my bf why for the details. He initially said that my visions weren’t what they (the co presidents, in which by the way are a couple romantically) wanted from me. I didn’t believe my boyfriend so I asked for more and knew it was an excuse. He mentioned that one of the people at the meeting pointed out my mental health as the biggest issue. She thought I wasn’t capable of being an intern because I get overwhelmed easily. I was clearly upset at her words as my boyfriend summarized it for me. All of my disappointment for not getting the cut went away and I was angry about her saying that my mental health was the biggest reason why I could not join their board. My bf made a thought about that they could be threatened by my ideas, which to me aren’t threatening , but they tend to think in “groupthink” at meetings. I am very outspoken with ideas so I can see why they would feel that I wouldn’t agree to why they think all the time. But, it’s no excuse to use my mental health as a reason not to pick me as an intern. I even emphasized that I will be professional at all times during my interview, but of course they didn’t give me a chance. My boyfriend feels hurt about what his friend said about me and is silently mad at her. She doesn’t know that, but everyone during that meeting felt uncomfortable talking about me.

In my anger, I vented to a friend from my hometown who I’m close to. She told me that I could report the story to my university’s ADA department (disability department) so that I can make a grievance report. However, I am hesitant to report because that would mean I could ultimately burn bridges with the e board (who were originally my friends) and my boyfriend will likely have to burn those bridges too. I hate that my boyfriend is stuck in a position in choosing sides, I don’t want to subject him to that. And if I do report, they would know that I know what happened during the meeting because my boyfriend tells me everything. I’ve already started to distance myself already from them and making sure I keep my guard up at all times if I can’t avoid them while hanging out. I am just mad she and the others who didn’t stand up for me believed that I couldn’t do it. I signed up for a reason. I still have the high functioning parts of me despite my mental illnesses trying to function on the daily basis. I don’t let my mental health stop me from being a hard worker. They don’t know that I know so far. Only one person on the board knows and she wasn’t even there. She’s a true friend and is gravely upset at the situation that she’s considering tor ending because she hates the way they’re running this cultural club. 

It’s so hypocritical of them to think that me being part of the e board is going to ruin their reputation. When in reality, it’s not because I’m not going to be a figurehead and the two co presidents are a couple who actually voted themselves last year to be presidents. The club is even a clique themselves. And even if my boyfriend is on the e board, I would have still maintained professionalism. 

I am very passionate about mental health due to my diagnoses, past experiences and I want to be a social worker focusing on mental health in the future. I want to be able to protect myself other side than just avoiding these people, which will be hard because they are my boyfriend’s friends. I also don’t like the discrimination people with mental health issues face when it comes to the workforce. I want to prevent any further discrimination in the future. 

Thank you for reading if you’ve made it this far. 

Any advice would be helpful.",5.153959925039644,6.459336165489408,5.720185815193889,79.26711453077702,68.77800201816348,8.690102349718899,30.40335880063428,9.04235418022936,2.5294708548363842,4104,161,768,75,70,1326,350,991,0.102,0.8029999999999999,0.095,-0.9549,3,2,0,0,0,0,88.0,1,1,19,4,34,37,7,5,62,0,84,14,2,14,7,129,147,47,1,25,16,0,7,3,13,9,11,3,0,1,58,32,0,7,28,13,0,12,22,16,0,4,35,11,135,21,120,82,15,90,0,5,1,1,90,43,0,8,35,540,193,16,0.04396972802501487,0.0,0.042908111842893705,0.0,0.0,0.12890012801860815,0.0,0.0,0.04402933120299838,0.0,0.09704337650430972,0.035162575615779186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05980184568646173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03914238006594768,0.08221152045281327,0.0,0.04131100687443879,0.0,0.0,0.214428304734308,0.0,0.0,0.09907765289090907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04516902270070747,0.0,0.03787602734775691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14042499991456758,0.09730333548417164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037871062318471684,0.08925669677977266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03894412812345305,0.0,0.0,0.11616636268856385,0.0,0.0,0.04201495940920032,0.039517156364453486,0.04301083113777717,0.0,0.0,0.044464831263904284,0.0,0.08443566855630473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30573812520450183,0.0,0.06891710432841411,0.042179769686624284,0.07496702915818776,0.036879721737766165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03888228528026387,0.0,0.07877647955133264,0.08682200668758469,0.0,0.3739021181873023,0.0,0.0,0.029471981853079237,0.046456431764013977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04707050325432395,0.14890941277965614,0.0,0.09178594472827233,0.0,0.039082314555600656,0.0,0.0,0.14498767568891327,0.03584119690181102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044962025945794834,0.0,0.0644441643488144,0.0,0.0,0.038911825655488834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037381490394513724,0.0,0.0832104396016316,0.08805040466169327,0.0,0.04417350173425831,0.047895923986710234,0.0,0.0,0.3988002965293206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780898857644316,0.0,0.12739871195783126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938507696576646,0.03344095951485214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522986126474944,0.08394816135661504,0.18289843864485567,0.03839267051997103,0.0,0.0,0.04156560525572338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04398162685787313,0.0,0.0,0.13562461067272996,0.0434148018771888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365056063638393,0.03496649254114945,0.0,0.0,0.035038180456058686,0.040028389006480085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036372213392924464,0.09884763311900653,0.0,0.1344648014492532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04922051066934972,0.031121999807053668,0.0,0.10534284479637006,0.03676066146300317,0.0,0.0,0.05033481892337899,0.0,0.0,0.04144094830321966,0.0,0.0,0.03534120184281152,0.038431480338075634,0.04048141804616683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452207889588084,0.0,0.10472115775674272,0.10255640802628932,0.0,0.0,0.04201495940920032,0.0,0.029852559080234795,0.0,0.042952035229073766,0.0,0.0,0.0379757275220133,0.0,0.10883889150922943,0.18154139363867175,0.06980224696776335,0.03526986360855786,0.0,0.0,0.040760378393043535,0.15870336195550644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032010485679144135,0.0446533931507921,0.0,0.1561741661792155,0.0,0.0,0.056630126487898086
mentalhealth,ymidead,2020/02/07,Not suicidal but would not care if I were to die Is this normal? I mean I have been going through some stuff for some years now and I honestly would not regret dying even though I am not suicidal at all.,1.7628571428571431,3.7807921904761934,3.1145238095238104,91.43464285714286,79.47619047619048,7.057142857142857,20.02380952380953,8.07648339933343,0.7729809523809532,160,4,35,3,4,52,32,42,0.163,0.574,0.263,0.6582,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,15,10,4,4,5,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,2,0,5,2,4,6,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,31,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420097071113101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4926953396072971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15677751880844756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490015011626968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585603594667314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325675621652224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717264391461137,0.5192781476756736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332101675758251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372349476579212,0.0,0.0,0.15285544825714414
mentalhealth,TheTimes33,2020/02/07,Crying in bed before falling asleep I do this and yeah wanted to know if you guys do this as well. I've been crying myself to sleep for some time now. Is it ok?,-1.2431428571428569,0.8039138285714316,0.9628571428571426,100.62714285714287,96.42857142857142,2.8000000000000003,9.857142857142858,3.1291,-2.043457142857143,124,1,29,0,5,41,30,35,0.18899999999999997,0.654,0.157,-0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,4,2,2,0,0,5,6,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,2,5,5,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,2,20,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785705356323233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7192083168631184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3241510010841018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799157844398485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276096892307658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19089398300624608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930932331589646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943478804414246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bakedbeansr,2020/02/07,"my depression Here’s a vent that nobody will see but I don’t care because I just need to vent. Maybe I’ll delete this again when I’m half way done writing it because I don’t have the effort to finish it. My life is what everybody would want. Straight A’s, friends and a “somewhat” good family. But apparently that’s not enough for my brain. I have to feel sad for no apparent reason and now that’s affecting my life now. I can’t solve easy problems I school, my ability to think fast is almost gone and I don’t feel like arguing or talking to anyone, it’s almost like my brain did a factory reset and went 8 years back. Nobody in my family knows I’m dealing with this because my dad doesn’t believe in depression and I’m uncomfortable explaining this type of stuff to my mother or sister. My family also argues a whole lot and puts a lot of stress on me and I have  told them this but they couldn’t care less. I just want to be alone and think but I can’t even think because of my depression! So I just stay in my room agitated and staring at nothing waiting for something to just click in my brain and let me return to a normal life.",2.18349341438703,4.048783953191492,3.787902735562312,87.8366666666667,77.55319148936171,7.199594731509625,23.53090172239109,8.11559375814309,1.270217831813576,899,29,190,16,21,299,124,235,0.171,0.6859999999999999,0.14300000000000002,-0.8842,2,1,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,1,13,14,2,1,8,0,18,6,3,2,0,45,38,19,0,7,11,3,2,2,1,2,3,0,1,0,12,11,0,1,8,0,0,3,9,8,0,1,5,5,28,6,22,28,6,22,0,4,3,0,13,8,0,7,11,126,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21991534422943107,0.1137288216737546,0.0,0.08781407426886922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678088064009893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443620505115013,0.0,0.2677537516454904,0.0,0.0,0.12371693792310295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677488796926757,0.0,0.0,0.2239148222270049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320807248854885,0.28373452918359704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123725484200537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346186556719602,0.0,0.07252769046375138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105539503622717,0.0,0.11104527829892596,0.07844744347385589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483802250723027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210242898822593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06034805612714887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122869589766642,0.23268365255309675,0.10729408630658786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867110651764528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103177197368744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142184919241663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758932969999037,0.10536452505541373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507221143813313,0.0,0.1103881942383782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290175634874985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113238899687213,0.08750341312977218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845361949753225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704159237490587,0.0,0.0,0.12578563314655555,0.0,0.12570482821128054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826017062251475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21108317532323714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049270339658332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12953617503577888,0.08716113071948088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179387694875547,0.0,0.1225976268514569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800503568109539,0.0,0.0,0.07071328032967163
mentalhealth,jbhaus2477,2020/02/07,"I can't get out of bed I've been struggling with anxiety for the past few years.  It started when I got promoted to GM, I was hyper-stressed at work so when I came home I would just sit in front of the TV.  My house is cluttered with garbage,  I can't tell if I'm just lazy,  apathetic or something else. 
Last September I found out that my extension wasn't being approved. (I work on a military base in Germany as a civilian.) Basically,  I was being fired but my contract ended on January 14th and would have to return to the US, after 10 years.  
In October my replacement was moved in and the following few weeks were very difficult for me, for a few different reasons.  I made the decision to resign early.
I took the rest of my paid leave so I could enjoy the holiday culture here one last season.  I should've used my time to get my household sorted,  but just couldn't bring myself to get out of bed.  
Now I'm beyond broke, my family helped me purchase a flight home and I still can't get out of bed.   My flight leaves on Sunday, and I've been working in spurts to try to get handle on it but today, but every time I start making a plan of action I get nauseous and light headed.  
I just want to get on the plane and leave it all, I'm so lost.  I know what my plan is when I return to the States and I'm excited about it, handling tomorrow is what fills me with anxiety.",3.424468085106384,4.327478148936169,4.8891418439716325,85.12350000000002,72.47517730496453,8.335035460992907,26.5113475177305,8.697196308434329,1.7637611347517734,1066,35,227,19,20,358,146,282,0.109,0.8370000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.8743,1,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,1,0,0,8,15,7,0,1,14,0,20,1,1,4,1,39,46,20,0,6,10,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,5,0,7,15,0,0,4,2,2,8,5,5,0,1,14,2,34,2,41,26,5,50,0,3,0,0,4,16,0,3,24,148,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988192968091765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13446911279634685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938703252242715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283594969478526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821490716038106,0.0,0.10413239735797204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905805638420312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083482415549606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289097757645239,0.0,0.0,0.4299794386594372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403171663077632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066105641716365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880490007435992,0.0,0.23586521272874994,0.0,0.0,0.13566035168563145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461356728364906,0.1916709880233301,0.0,0.3734699453332808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283418810479454,0.0,0.0,0.11124786942797714,0.07847909443238124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495863245687973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966868435181533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223416362213696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088185930814585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905113680949931,0.0,0.0,0.16643374016280274,0.0,0.09389180091010636,0.0,0.13467639211953095,0.122910014572357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027616324836788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711238570222947,0.0,0.11144290611819574,0.0,0.13062493964863836,0.07982252252357562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141422606084775,0.10154299861957547,0.0,0.09700781816377688,0.0693460145899837,0.0,0.09430781042023173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567777563638589,0.0,0.0,0.1670371489953085,0.0,0.0,0.15142284904097505
mentalhealth,ishtarsin,2020/02/07,Any tips for treating identity crisis? When I am around people I sometimes feel like I am not me and I'm only playing a character?,1.7433333333333323,4.30468307692308,4.128461538461536,80.89987179487181,83.61538461538461,6.5435897435897425,27.89743589743589,7.793537801064563,2.2929128205128206,104,5,18,2,3,36,22,26,0.153,0.6729999999999999,0.174,-0.2869,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3280613290589345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4294550136224903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439254419888253,0.3446400894370808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356854593553191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669012384991328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3344484559848009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4771245318358792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,makgag,2020/02/07,"confused, scared and in need of help for a while now i've been dealing with sudden moments of existential dread, its not common for my age, at least i think, and i don't know what to do anymore. I've fell asleep crying my eyes out due to the fact that im gonna die one day, that ive become numb to everything and i just have no motivation to live anymore, i just want to get out of this mess, any way i can. I've been dealing with this since last year when it started in November, and i just cant get away from it. I just want to do something, and I've been desperate enough to ask my parents for help, even crying while doing so, just for them to laugh and tell me ""your too young to think that""and ""just stop thinking about it"" and  of course, that didn't help at all. i don't know what to do anymore, when all this was at its peak i almost broke down in tears in the middle of class because my teacher just mentioned life. I've even become so desperate to consider becoming a christian once more but decided its best for me if i don't. Right now my last metal brake down was 2 days ago in the back of a car while my mom had gone and went to get some toilet paper, as always i cried my eyes out due to me being such a god damn failure. i just want to restart my life and be a normal god damn kid. I've been brushing these feelings off for so long due to thinking I'm just having some dumb emo phase and that i'll get better in a week but so far, absoloutley no luck. I hate this so much, I hate how I've considered self harm and even suicide, so please if you can, PLEASE help me in any way you can, any advice would be really nice, thank you.",8.281685714285715,4.502360311428575,8.117714285714289,81.39028571428574,64.45714285714286,11.371428571428574,34.42857142857143,8.418075326091056,2.388457142857144,1279,33,300,12,14,414,176,350,0.17600000000000002,0.6920000000000001,0.132,-0.9446,1,0,1,0,0,2,34.0,0,4,1,3,27,18,5,3,9,0,26,6,3,2,3,56,50,28,2,8,14,2,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,17,16,0,2,9,0,0,4,8,12,0,1,10,4,32,6,49,35,9,52,1,1,2,0,18,20,3,7,26,189,49,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914375231879704,0.08294597550381723,0.0,0.09369889048311432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785944055562195,0.0,0.0,0.190896605849953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783949867413325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747723438999097,0.0,0.08791402011147567,0.07195112971874837,0.0,0.05704065248330285,0.31002892916422703,0.0,0.0,0.09819809234640396,0.0827568731685542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30835350561745817,0.12069246098998795,0.19293734728837386,0.0,0.0,0.09711301359982312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09668493986212508,0.0,0.1854103673275232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409652395866686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04731283943126305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19555013395075715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18476605194471404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508774877583376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107386981761657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028495018706351,0.15254741743875636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13218541073415993,0.0,0.0,0.08262583346655802,0.08280831870422316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959045271431377,0.0,0.0,0.0687862224531734,0.06938248858573186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916807406598593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965117817914036,0.06340684197408948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039006867583742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20542802098813287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059944650551701215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991001846109966,0.0,0.0,0.0936819446890425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761605427100684,0.0,0.0,0.07740376576739842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203633473240735,0.0,0.0,0.06623077779882429,0.0,0.0,0.07823042272952377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235263409942708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178609506237708,0.08614857079297739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23982876255396354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16557365636501098,0.14854627393618824,0.07505785341994001,0.0,0.0,0.08674222675542251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647089879994128,0.0,0.0,0.0602573315884608
mentalhealth,fluvixx,2020/02/07,"Urge to shave my head Hi everyone.

  
I've struggled with depression and anxiety for a long time. In the last few years I've been getting better, but some days are harder than others. This week was really weird and bad and I'm with an urge to shave my head. I've long natural curly hair who needs to be taken care of and for a long time I've been neglecting it and just wearing it in a messy-not-cute bun every day.

  
I've never had short hair, except for when I transition from relaxed to natural. My relationship with my hair was very problematic once growing up, got bullied a lot. Since I was a child, my scalp gets very itchy when I'm too anxious and it's just being overall annoying.

  
I'm a bit scared of shaving and regretting it after the bad days are gone. I'm ago scared that ""urge"" is kinda like a breakdown, and I'm really scared to know if I'm going to feel better or worse after I did.  
Has someone else felt like this urge and did it? How did you feel after?",2.718,4.175647400000003,4.212,87.12850000000002,75.0,7.6,23.5,8.278499904357787,1.25075,760,22,162,13,16,253,113,200,0.252,0.627,0.121,-0.9866,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,2,6,17,1,4,10,0,15,7,7,1,1,30,33,15,0,3,6,0,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,10,12,0,1,4,1,0,3,1,11,0,0,13,6,9,6,23,18,4,25,0,3,0,0,5,4,0,5,20,89,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161194561069169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021106878597133,0.14798743639332254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21875125749387545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23170944806115096,0.14301297270423088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335584691640973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25344345234177856,0.0,0.11282608565126312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094297891368554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036921518165208,0.12517165135409067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247034948378714,0.0,0.12577605946782106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368793064285058,0.0,0.07444766474284079,0.0,0.10476893193290343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688780011612485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199160746223224,0.10677867754227573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799540267093726,0.0,0.0,0.3477802342063037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113675450019296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713137724866208,0.10103167398695796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13950575106615895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16783792525925276,0.0,0.0,0.14063996062623388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3934475325024997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083606905210713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109919178867746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694476089558896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527688605452218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21616973213554536,0.0,0.0,0.10507655208992056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349543236220998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843566975734007
mentalhealth,Cowboy_Bill,2020/02/07,"Had an episode... So I tend to come up with an idea and run away with it and cause myself great stress for no reason. This is something that has caused me issues over the last couple years. 

I was called into work last night and have not left still. As of now, I’m at 32 hours without sleep which isn’t a crazy amount of time but I think it’s probably a little bit of a factor. 

So I’m sitting in the break room and realize how bleak the room is. The walls are that grayish blue administrative color and there’s a clock that just sits there right in the middle. So it reminded me of detention from when I was in school. Then I thought it was ironic that detention was punishment in school but working in almost the same situation is just kinda normal in real life. 

Then I blast off on an hour long mind fuck where I became convinced that I have committed some crime in the past and that this is a shutter island type scenario where I’m completely delusional about everything and that all my coworkers are actually just fellow inmates or maybe this is a mental institution. Then I validate this by looking at all the strange things that have happened since I’ve been working here that would back it up and also I’m looking at my coworkers and thinking “yea they could definitely be a criminal because _______.  

So I’m still not completely out of this but I’m coming back around. Just by telling one of my coworkers that no sleep was making me go crazy immediately relieved a lot of the pressure. 

I guess what I want to ask is do you think that this is a serious condition I have if similar types  kid of paranoid delusions like this or do I just have an issue overthinking?",4.262300613496933,5.864472923312885,4.9514282208588964,82.78897055214725,71.30061349693251,8.406184049079755,28.07067484662577,8.954980946260402,2.20007327607362,1327,49,259,26,25,427,183,326,0.13699999999999998,0.794,0.069,-0.9684,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,1,3,24,9,2,2,22,1,28,4,2,5,3,56,50,26,0,5,14,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,2,1,26,16,0,0,7,0,0,4,6,5,0,1,8,4,22,4,38,39,7,54,0,0,4,1,7,28,1,8,20,186,48,7,0.0,0.0,0.10494462587206037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076869032926452,0.0,0.0,0.08600059951850635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573440208236966,0.10053643571970196,0.0,0.10103842780847283,0.16538497537952698,0.0,0.0655560721802333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11740705656148345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981151334958512,0.0,0.0,0.22094871970542845,0.0,0.18527431521965626,0.2255096488745089,0.0,0.0,0.08586283831992407,0.11899221032935242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665102965564568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942003798815957,0.0,0.0,0.061118100127950714,0.0,0.0,0.11856447094423403,0.11846867445855852,0.0,0.0950982624620852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21181269297758168,0.0,0.0,0.12140084117588867,0.0,0.2244899907292808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17532074184198101,0.0,0.0,0.1168437479375999,0.0,0.07595947758310607,0.05253916199642777,0.10778446020651238,0.0,0.09517051228835244,0.1806149216412897,0.0,0.0,0.09142761952229723,0.0,0.0,0.07178453660027681,0.0,0.10803951546351508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837616095161026,0.0,0.10858588061722303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092006160953958,0.1053674702265077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287265008742355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10266017319142873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594752260772898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240534500841535,0.0,0.1105701883613314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183953391299447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21767472148921924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895913063327608,0.1208807312938294,0.21523758160450016,0.0,0.0,0.08279041269206215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17176496410020892,0.0,0.123187996360324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093995684092465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144554550082367,0.20672403344464635,0.0,0.08537564149415795,0.06270809532768915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343054234280326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366580774129586,0.0,0.2348736613636675,0.0,0.0,0.07639413032467497,0.0,0.0,0.06925295919708692
mentalhealth,g007w,2020/02/07,"Having difficultly talking about sexual assault, is this okay? Thinking or talking about sexual assault sends me into a frenzied panic. While myself and my loved one have gone through it in some way or another, I just can’t seem to handle it. I was talking with my s/o the other day just about our opinions on a policy and I couldn’t mentally handle it and had to stop the conversation almost as soon as it started. I get so anxious about it because scenarios and horror stories start to fill my head and I can’t think about anything else, and they aren’t even my memories most of the time. I’m just not sure of what’s going on or if it’s reasonable to feel and act this way.",3.3840240641711223,5.066105985294122,4.936229946524065,81.69326203208556,73.70588235294117,7.886631016042781,27.804812834224602,8.575989854853784,2.141170588235294,538,21,103,10,11,181,88,136,0.171,0.7879999999999999,0.040999999999999995,-0.9537,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,1,0,11,7,2,1,5,1,9,2,1,1,1,29,20,15,0,2,8,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,1,5,0,0,5,5,4,0,1,3,1,13,3,19,16,2,18,0,0,0,1,8,4,0,9,7,78,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19150189913110774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20053460385487404,0.0,0.21604977083819493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15737641432008814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657975053822607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333569464493845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15975870277969342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12631397333431493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669803513847207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991639664522263,0.0,0.10868761091570116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19627014275699967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17260396733956865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19272762061298349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959097587321386,0.0,0.0,0.22438205607790734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19662930598846035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17410013517029474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27072507825887115,0.0,0.0,0.15988742711134865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18024394386713247,0.0,0.0,0.4611408181017285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24508114908588086,0.0,0.0,0.11151513302887583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035990439263131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,allym2000,2020/02/07,"Please help. Mother going through psychosis Hello all, my mom is in her 50s and has had no prior mental health issues that were apparent atleast. These past two months have been really stressful for my family, my grandpa died and my mom has been organizing this huge event for the company she works for. I knew she was stressed out organizing this event but today I get a call from her co workers she’s yelling and crying in the bathroom. I was immediately taken aback because this is not like my mom AT ALL. When we picked her up she’s talking about this storm we had last night and that were going “home” she thinks my siblings are coming in to town to go “home” I think home is heaven. Shes crying, slightly aggressive and refusing to go to ER. Never in my life have I ever seen her act even close to this. It’s breaking my heart. I’m scared she may act on a delusion to take us “home”. What can I do??",1.6483333333333334,4.104466055555559,2.8666666666666667,90.54000000000002,82.8888888888889,5.6000000000000005,21.22222222222221,6.961326702584282,0.5483555555555548,710,22,145,9,20,228,114,180,0.145,0.8029999999999999,0.051,-0.9511,1,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,3,0,0,2,4,6,1,3,4,0,20,3,1,1,4,22,33,7,1,0,2,5,0,1,0,1,2,1,4,0,10,10,0,1,3,0,0,7,3,4,1,1,11,2,28,2,20,21,2,30,1,0,1,0,24,11,0,1,12,96,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384146114019335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369018347310565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434522457321126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661174958702659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12571677405053386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000710509644535,0.10957159795200193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419327057881246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632869146321182,0.0,0.2753703610034959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128758555287623,0.0,0.14354301066594302,0.08119279608819065,0.0,0.48602450109860496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643122425962555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873944026269786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555971438864741,0.059179391929270075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207342220610737,0.0,0.0,0.4256079902561955,0.0966870853191449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342512164309197,0.0,0.0,0.11367497410642174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563501194090953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296749395829924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760080559337268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127511480200236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775145411753915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910768281475663,0.09736199652400312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552340784987785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11481977825480458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832919331017452,0.0,0.14570790404234782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818615759832762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sigh_sarah,2020/02/07,"suicide (maybe trigger warning) so a close friend of mine has childhood trauma, and in turn it's really helped develop her depression. I say help develop because I honestly think she has like genetic depression passed down, based on what she's told me about her dad. I think what he did to her, and childhood bullying and some other things were just environmental factors that brought it out and worsened it. she goes to therapy but she says her therapist doesn't help her and she's not on medication. recently she's been getting really bad and is saying that after (insert event here) or a date or whatever, that she needs to ""think on it"" and maybe after those events she will have done enough with her life to be done with it and rest. I am so scared that I'm naseous all the time and I just don't know what to do. I don't know what moves are in my place to make. I don't even believe in God either but I've been praying I'm so lost.",3.873753799392098,5.202533882978726,4.648206686930092,85.65500000000003,71.87234042553192,8.5629179331307,27.258358662613983,9.04235418022936,2.011852887537995,742,26,155,15,14,239,110,188,0.139,0.773,0.08800000000000001,-0.9032,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,1,8,9,0,1,3,0,19,2,0,2,1,31,33,16,1,1,8,1,0,1,1,1,2,3,0,0,16,13,0,0,5,0,0,3,5,6,0,0,9,3,24,3,20,22,5,23,1,3,0,0,24,11,0,3,10,108,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217223182012962,0.08886767352694869,0.0,0.0,0.1642469826329212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511245486108213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29837227332990784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063231741879407,0.0,0.09628798219537182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126312164145013,0.0,0.07616535183908506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29314485862379364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602365252978898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297050800380984,0.07122197746749441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591388460185049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731096679096367,0.0,0.2929162797253853,0.0,0.0,0.1468605558322922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15494375185142792,0.0,0.10809589434358163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15231170935318145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18678403570067814,0.0,0.14394265511690638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3477963431045694,0.14595373849260412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594624197967176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667150212688535,0.16926474655299098,0.09685143116973366,0.2802346648198391,0.0,0.0,0.08500696209737478,0.0,0.0,0.13930144905640982,0.0,0.0,0.15856952360822385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raven0190blue,2020/02/07,"Anxious mess I have been dealing with work and family related anxiety as of lately due to an abundance of things piling up. I am seeking therapy for that but today I realized that I also have separation anxiety from my SO...so much that I have become clingy and though I apologize for it and try to distract myself when they are not around, I still feel lonely and feel like they are going to disappear on me. Has anyone here dealt with separation anxiety and if so how was it dealt with/how are you dealing with it?",6.261433333333336,6.59014681,7.312000000000001,72.32433333333336,65.9,11.066666666666668,32.66666666666667,10.864195022040775,3.695566666666666,411,16,74,11,6,139,65,100,0.166,0.787,0.047,-0.85,0,2,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,2,1,8,4,0,1,1,0,10,0,0,1,0,16,13,13,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,2,2,13,1,15,11,1,10,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,1,6,62,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16332886440104247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4687239864867098,0.2307305369774916,0.0,0.14280779188382406,0.0,0.0,0.18181490900957614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255645618707181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4211203289343445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925371852224416,0.0,0.206537498147845,0.14590749790881832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607302674790435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303890913920807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978025401569887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15013825489336405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16310454047669753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335636802282129,0.0,0.13568649379765635,0.0,0.20066256409337596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19359351738496192,0.0,0.0,0.13866403381019027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14868752312200575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pineapples_29,2020/02/07,Feeling of dread? Sometimes I get random feeling of dread and self loathing.. kind of. It’s this feeling that I don’t want to be anywhere (not like I want to die) but I don’t want to be anywhere with anyone. I just want to be out of where I’m at because I feel so dreadful. Then it goes away and I’m fine? I’m having a good day what’s going on. There’s no reason to feel this way.,-1.3307165775401089,0.638446152941178,1.0283422459893041,101.45299465240645,93.35294117647058,3.0909090909090917,18.31550802139037,3.1291,-0.9795882352941176,293,9,72,0,11,98,51,85,0.14,0.659,0.201,-0.3657,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,3,1,0,6,0,0,1,0,18,20,5,1,4,3,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,5,6,4,14,17,0,9,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,3,43,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505523708354322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202294343110874,0.0,0.0,0.13125325528389953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885954756388955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22346166480366897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5443454730725179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124925405602289,0.0,0.12236775834443075,0.18059494666225265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22421612316584516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10519141572363107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22137838154608974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22461918532208155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129507909294707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5079904814325639,0.17090602198253144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IndigoDank,2020/02/07,"Starting a youtube channel with Mental Health as the main topic  [Watch this video: The Start of a Journey - A Life Of Virtue](https://youtu.be/mO3UmWJMPyc)

Hi, I just made my first video for my new channel, out of my mental health experience which I overcame (as long as I don't fall back down) I've always wished to help people who also suffer the same troubles, I am just real quick sharing my first video which is an introduction of myself and my new channel, I hope to grow and learn and make a community where people can count on each other!

If a channel like this interests you, please let me know! If you got any ideas of tips, also let me know! And if you hate it, tell me as well! :) Thanks for reading!",6.3602205882352925,6.540216345588237,5.876764705882355,83.20794117647061,65.69117647058823,8.270588235294117,29.5,7.645422480735847,1.6792382352941178,557,17,109,5,8,171,87,136,0.069,0.763,0.168,0.9085,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,3,0,2,8,9,1,0,9,0,6,3,0,2,0,22,17,13,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,4,8,0,3,1,3,1,2,2,1,17,6,17,13,3,16,0,1,1,0,8,4,0,4,10,76,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405319963800185,0.1251356633895217,0.0,0.0,0.10226965088785693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563982844892128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14710926174149302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25584154767790634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027979081713334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14847796437380864,0.0,0.3197128671724453,0.0,0.0,0.10080255084066793,0.0,0.0,0.14937017200753808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697708321438293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529968047573476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075658046272093,0.1062241710484595,0.07347245015666752,0.0,0.0,0.13308949847669665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423016716390492,0.10038579960110358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031134026930068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904931923294496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085215403574971,0.0,0.0,0.16508191878660006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504296589044226,0.17117556253851116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128921620169912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13144658102645526,0.13845795036938513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521773739075232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17293988382139994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lucan2000,2020/02/07,"My friend has BPD So one of my good friends has told me they have BPD, and I was just looking for some help in understanding what they go through and how I can be a better friend without making things worse. What are things I should avoid saying?",5.4805442176870764,5.787136918367349,4.506530612244899,91.8444217687075,67.57142857142857,7.34965986394558,26.537414965986393,6.42735559955562,0.7047088435374143,195,5,43,1,3,57,39,49,0.037000000000000005,0.619,0.344,0.9542,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,2,1,3,6,0,1,1,0,8,0,0,2,0,10,13,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,2,2,8,5,5,9,1,2,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,1,0,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18878402186406856,0.0,0.0,0.5376793982277673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4947455127723408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12131166584827507,0.1790363255794279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307470582446133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17924883934129573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424831874501208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14464295451554665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697483616465882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836206663492132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20396585433802306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22221467797724814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057634612704916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21752936561455768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,roadtripper44,2020/02/07,"Trauma/Stress after being stuck in a potential fire I live in a building of 9 floors and live on the 6th floor

A few weeks ago, i heard a fire alarm. There are only detectors in people's apartments.  
It usually happens when people are cooking and burn something and forget to open their windows  
But normally it stops after a few seconds, max 15-30 seconds  
This time, it was going on for more than 2 minutes  
I looked outside the window and down, i saw smoke coming out of an apartment on the 4th floor  
I started panicking because i thought of this situation a few days ago, i don't know why  
I put on my shoes and went in the hall and stairs and smelt burnt   
So i thought i can't use the elevator because it's non recommended during a fire and i didn't want to take the stairs in case there were dangerous smokes.  
So i really started to panic   
Anyway to be sure, i called firefighter line and explained the situation.  
They advised me to go downstairs and check and knock on the neighbors. There was just burnt smells but not smokes so they said it was ok.  
So i went downstairs and knocked at the door, the neighbor opened and yeah it was only burnt bread.  
After that, i had to lie down 2-3 hours on my bed to calm down and i thought of it a little days after.  
Then i stopped thinking of it until today. 

Why am I telling this story ? Because 2 weeks ago, i was stuck in the traffic and i started to panic. I don't like to be stuck somewhere on in a situation where i cannot extract myself easily. But this time it was real hard time. I had to pullover once and then on the motorway, i really had the feeling i would faint and have an accident. And last week, i started having chest pain just where the heart is and also 2 nights where i felt like i was choking and could not breathe. I even went twice to the emergency, once sent by my doctor for a check up. And everything is clear.  
The choke feeling last days seems to come only when i'm resting or alone not talking to someone. But when i'm busy out of home or with people, i don't think of it. And i think it grows when i'm home  
I only understood today that maybe this is post traumatic stress after the supposedly ""fire"" incident

  
I plan to talk about it with my doctor beginning next week and maybe get psychological help  
But now it's weekend so won't be possible to have an appointment before next week  
Has anyone been like this kind of situation ? How did you live this ? What are the advices you got ?  
We plan to move in a different city, in a house (it was planned before the incident) maybe april or may but i'm thinking : is it a good option to leave this place earlier because it would be good to go out of this ""toxic"" zone where i experienced the stress/trauma ?

Thank you",2.647208521434166,4.6382146983546635,3.821077491325596,87.55035518412119,76.60511882998172,6.805342685520277,25.05723239935828,7.745696148679241,1.3071469536992129,2148,76,438,32,49,698,248,547,0.141,0.7979999999999999,0.062,-0.9893,1,1,4,0,1,0,48.0,1,3,3,3,24,16,1,4,36,2,42,10,4,2,2,76,88,46,0,5,14,0,8,3,2,4,4,2,8,0,28,33,2,2,14,2,2,12,10,6,0,3,31,14,47,10,65,47,5,99,0,0,2,0,19,41,0,6,48,286,75,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606858117401578,0.17979892907968142,0.0,0.0,0.07002449374515092,0.0,0.05406840591399269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047275107725577914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16485988891298922,0.0,0.11506377864759565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903828009405387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648159357979546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053981795722367915,0.0,0.0,0.1308102961125124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063899190659717,0.0,0.13840522578395548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044656356519705565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060764310163934035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837219696145097,0.0,0.06491705913421421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03532390053904857,0.0,0.1152744840702762,0.11341761688343566,0.05407460671366333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978808851685944,0.0,0.06056607910919685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011923256669669,0.04531815573848437,0.0,0.13563847468426668,0.0,0.06658310945369267,0.0780138917684801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040633978500006,0.037157178071622984,0.1102238017889016,0.0,0.07159017239742935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990938000354028,0.06776387581358942,0.17910496900382528,0.0,0.056776121050899166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20377268563954806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185967828403338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438099013649264,0.06344824206481887,0.06624431901909494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440067868216495,0.0,0.20568452015113906,0.07194275602194586,0.15865362838867333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406186385454632,0.0,0.07063899190659717,0.0,0.0,0.07622112201911838,0.06475254516970101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796762072465627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695599701642945,0.08662653739606373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431344104086954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155041679922764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039899016224235,0.0,0.0,0.05728648939521765,0.052050167839331515,0.0,0.0,0.19142134942673095,0.0,0.0,0.11305146627294235,0.2323441450954596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372246557825469,0.0,0.05083497651288443,0.1086861478866178,0.059094899688242185,0.06224702555383825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732893183697357,0.0,0.1610264881402476,0.11827336453188016,0.0,0.1281744401845105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058394102666870264,0.0744638455551565,0.0,0.039878655845851166,0.0,0.27116689672512306,0.0,0.0,0.1880279227760015,0.12201662767665655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605767566660152,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway564712,2020/02/07,"I keep hurting myself with drugs Hey Everyone I'm not ok, I'm so tired that I barely even feel sad or anything. I come from a fucked up house hold my mom and her boyfriends always drank and broke shit and yelled at each other keeping me up all night multiple times a week for my whole life it never stopped. My dad has been in jail for most of my life so I never had a father figure so I was just left with this toxic evil bitch to raise me. As I got older she started taking her anger out on me more and more as I became a man. When my grandmother died (probably form my mom getting her drunk while in critical condition the night before) she started keeping up all night with abuse for like 2 weeks strait and her and her boyfriend would gang up on me for not wanting to go to school in the morning. I end up getting drunk at a friend's house one day and when she came to get me she hit me. That just set me off from all the shit she put me through and I ended up destroying the house she was renting. So I moved back in with my dad but he had manipulative meth head girlfriend and I watched him slowly descend into delirium as the power and water got shut off and eventually he went back to jail and I ended up at my grandparents Wich is run by my junkie aunt. Some time when I was living with my dad I picked up a dxm habbit and I could get it for free so I was taking high doses every day. I didn't have a bed to sleep in I had to ask my grandfather for his car keys so I could sleep in there in the middle of winter and wake up freezing. Eventually I went crazy from brain damage of heavy dxm use I took over the dose that can kill you multiple times and was drinking it every day for like 3 months. I slowly came back and my mom eventually let me move back in but continued with the abuse while Making every one around her think I'm a minster. Shes been acting worse lately and the only person I can go to for help is my aunt who shoots up meth so I started using meth like every other day and I feel like that is bringing back the heart and brain damage from the dxm. I feel like shit haven't slept right in over a week. To top it off a girl has never even loved me or held my hand. My friend ended up talking me into getting an escort. But I feel even more lonlely than before I wanted love not sex and I couldn't even climax because I was on a Suboxone. I just want love and this world feels like shit",2.338784817433975,3.76029947731756,3.5462923942848903,91.66235676143744,75.92307692307692,6.3664598066099005,21.04435464472988,6.914303735213361,0.2833794102083034,1893,44,422,18,41,615,229,507,0.147,0.759,0.094,-0.9746,3,0,5,1,3,1,20.0,0,1,0,2,24,28,10,0,23,1,27,29,13,5,6,79,75,41,2,7,11,9,7,6,3,1,6,1,2,3,13,35,5,6,7,3,2,15,9,15,0,2,22,9,74,14,71,47,11,97,0,5,1,5,41,42,6,4,45,277,87,1,0.0,0.15105313590712954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05304036123935175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05245612475454206,0.05674593857002901,0.059592312494846714,0.0,0.0,0.24507714701183456,0.0,0.03885793156812314,0.0,0.10848340287352122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14231943307144435,0.0,0.14581298732432982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05491006723483245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178926786545488,0.0,0.0,0.16443919155062808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615651596798904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06244514298322192,0.07392314660773314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22583410599289025,0.0,0.0,0.16841002693047027,0.0,0.21482927669490745,0.06091040712495875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16115515837163538,0.13661681473224538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849737089250957,0.05893057506592,0.16651882018311734,0.0,0.0724547055173236,0.0,0.10196427432323217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542003856507228,0.0,0.0,0.07553729841490753,0.042726458354196466,0.06734934918678802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206570794890583,0.06823958792566967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997657913572028,0.07052361970991781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190634309671064,0.0,0.06925836479402889,0.06518286210510105,0.0900489636950734,0.18685346088681368,0.0,0.056287381767634745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725951493368904,0.0,0.04254981297833242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22396964936572164,0.050880089408300924,0.13550019860765822,0.0,0.0,0.14749059380034935,0.0,0.0,0.17945911267042164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638957021402224,0.04848041000969936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05565906107893934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872713311129479,0.0,0.0,0.06408062439883769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05443728102300048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451263132790885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26173041781282497,0.0,0.0,0.12758066398306636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13535562371925713,0.0,0.0,0.05329308625736745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585555596958427,0.0512352510344116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04084477139404013,0.0,0.0,0.11150943593652696,0.07326469180312904,0.0,0.0,0.07082225900484153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010921142176858,0.0,0.0,0.11279411311781318,0.0,0.15339548926246951,0.0,0.0,0.11818320319233687,0.0,0.07116823073934983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496088408630611,0.04528211940765999,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,astrowalker,2020/02/07,"I don’t know what’s going on with me. I’m 29 years old and recently have just lost all motivation, energy, drive. 

I haven’t been to work in a week, and before that another week. 

Up until this point I’ve always been a hardworking person, I’ve managed to make an amazing career out of little to no opportunities or resources. Now I just... can’t... get up in the morning. 

The hardest thing about it is that I’m not happy with myself when I don’t get up. Like I WANT TO WAKE UP and go to work. And when I don’t I hate myself for it. I’ll go to sleep saying you MUST go to work and then sleep through all of my alarms. 

I’m super depressed. I feel worthless. This has been going for months now. I’m not sure what to do. If anybody out there has gone through a similar phase and worked their way out of it I would love to hear how. I feel like I’ve tried everything.",1.029916879795401,2.7480927717391346,2.996393861892585,92.85781329923277,80.52173913043478,6.0685421994884905,20.06265984654732,7.048011613610866,0.2196941176470588,666,17,155,8,17,224,103,184,0.113,0.7490000000000001,0.138,0.6796,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,1,8,9,13,1,1,6,0,15,4,3,3,4,29,36,13,0,4,6,0,2,2,0,2,0,2,0,1,10,11,0,0,4,0,0,7,8,5,0,0,5,4,16,8,30,29,2,32,0,3,0,1,6,12,0,2,14,99,26,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188405680565433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535982648160625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464467557676598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616400569769093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164781855854346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813054827326205,0.10464616767528423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15306071726639442,0.0,0.4162430853015414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559319152033192,0.0,0.14461981623729964,0.0,0.0,0.16509490962252138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050221295565538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312658831192535,0.14681260107888186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15990148622958988,0.0,0.1322049630043523,0.0,0.09777730959858788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691986183376744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15370733326271493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790169606276494,0.0,0.0,0.1384720400555874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446324707064308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648769519829714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931738874485313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805675673626353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731557174734336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09945109018112673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639838146750252,0.1162699241190433,0.2349966967309752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4265601068855757,0.0,0.0,0.1040560110301222,0.0,0.0,0.09432906239595104
mentalhealth,spencejvd01,2020/02/07,"Feeling indecisive about life. I’m 26 years old and I don’t know what to do with my life. 

I’m indecisive about which path I should take: the traditional academic route or non traditional. 

I want to be able to travel, to be free but to also make a decent living. One of my options is to get my AA Degree, teach English abroad while doing my BA degree online. Eventually building my career up to become an international school counselor. However, that would require a MA Degree. The money doesn’t have to be an issue, I’m just afraid of wasting it on something I don’t end up liking and I frankly never liked school. 

The other option is to just travel abroad for a few months after getting my AA by the end of 2020, maybe get a TEFL certificate so I can have something to fall back on and just explore.  Challenge, figure myself out since I would be completely out of my comfort zone and alone. 

I honestly thought about learning graphic design and tattooing whether or not I decide to leave the states and travel. When it comes to anything artistic and creative, I feel confident that I would enjoy it immensely. Even with the challenges and the periods of boredom. But I’m afraid of possibly becoming a starving artist because either field is very competitive and the possibility of it not benefitting me in the long run as I get older (if I get older). 

I just feel so lost, sad and hopeless. I want to at least have half of my shit figure out before turning 30. Making a decision in something and sticking to it. 

It’s a mess, but I would appreciate any advice/thoughts  from personal experience or otherwise. 

Do you believe in the saying of doing something that scares you?

Thank you for reading 🙏🏽",4.800776397515532,6.608377375776397,5.8505913043478275,76.05745217391305,70.27329192546584,8.257590062111804,30.89242236024845,8.841846274778883,2.740740968944099,1353,58,234,25,25,448,180,322,0.131,0.746,0.12300000000000001,-0.7876,1,1,4,0,0,1,32.0,0,3,0,4,13,20,1,5,19,0,23,3,1,2,1,58,46,25,0,8,15,1,3,2,0,5,2,1,0,1,12,17,0,1,11,6,2,7,6,10,2,2,2,4,29,11,45,35,3,33,0,3,0,0,6,11,1,8,16,166,41,11,0.11148131651021102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546102289863705,0.0,0.08915156853612546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581111808417859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173962466413538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572225106535745,0.0,0.06795797581245468,0.2462447108866335,0.09486238936324858,0.12560126793070522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096031282943176,0.11688603934015078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19747871404048387,0.0,0.0,0.07363235814965775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905011913446228,0.0,0.0,0.16910490979899906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912219332746476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635753068133517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06126721606571391,0.0,0.0,0.11804261755293817,0.0,0.0,0.15748510149074785,0.10892828021616746,0.0,0.09844004491091554,0.0986574569990926,0.0,0.0,0.12169502609143902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488292888743512,0.0,0.11199796654188064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898332324465141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598126389783753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698088850152386,0.0,0.0755426252264673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734118554188376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513568679793178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151148493770778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865441742132532,0.11161224589962876,0.2256500880235397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443396936816624,0.09221849703338432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3432950557356152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382007599465544,0.0,0.0,0.1026370182553652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17700742545042886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212596596972053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198376138888133,0.13150913771807268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31677251477449925,0.0,0.0,0.07179031277404083
mentalhealth,reinforcedduck,2020/02/07,I can't find a telepsychiatrist that takes PA Medicaid I have PA Aetna Medicaid but the nearest provider is over 2hrs away and I can't find a telepsychiatrist that takes my insurance. Any ideas?,3.872499999999999,6.881062361111113,4.308888888888891,80.20000000000002,78.16666666666667,9.155555555555557,28.44444444444445,9.516144504307137,3.2050777777777766,159,7,29,5,4,50,25,36,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,6,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,17,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371566864442677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276548204008428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6374881904519649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3936875471518511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.524421535593939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NiftyBiscuit01,2020/02/07,"Should I see a therapist? So I broke off a pretty big relationship a few weeks ago, and it's just been hard to function. Some days I can barely get out of bed. I can't do my homework, my grades are dropping, and all I want to do is lie down and listen to music and do nothing at all. I feel like I'm just rolling through the days without any reason. Like I'm just going to class because it's what I'm supposed to do. But it feels like it's just heartache, and it'll probably go away, so I don't know.",2.058454545454545,2.7872318909090907,3.717954545454546,92.8969318181818,75.54545454545455,6.590909090909091,25.56818181818182,6.6274283507984215,0.6901818181818182,388,13,94,3,8,130,69,110,0.066,0.8370000000000001,0.09699999999999999,0.4872,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,4,0,12,0,0,1,2,21,24,8,0,2,6,0,3,3,0,2,0,1,2,0,6,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,5,9,3,13,21,4,13,0,1,1,0,2,6,0,1,7,59,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921624421850176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14741787355019415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20367200101403904,0.0,0.0,0.1321471116403222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27961040805516496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192210222761368,0.3097354343512773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325863334941272,0.0,0.24640220599695944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19419235255905887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913665091601845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177233599387775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20800631281330972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22054325342991465,0.23372556812643094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22288600490439445,0.0,0.2327406552598551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172745640092158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516983563514353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786249513752942,0.0,0.17388788703409697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089682406720489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,burner916363,2020/02/07,"Does anyone else just cry multiple times throughout the day, but briefly? This started when i was on a medication over the summer that we thought to be making my depression worse. My physical health condition was not getting better and i was very clearly stressed beyond my comprehension. This got better with therapy though. 

I recently have been going through a break up. It’s my first and this is like nothing i’ve experienced. The person is long distance and i can’t even find them if i felt like it. I am just heartbroken. 

I find myself crumpling. Actually, physically crumpling where i feel like i can’t breathe and i sob and panic for a solid 60 seconds. I just let it happen until my chest feels like it’s not caving. I sob like i have never sobbed before, but only briefly. This happens literally every hour and i don’t want to go in public at the moment because i won’t know how to collect myself. 

I know it gets better. But it still hurts. 

I don’t even know what this is. Is it just from mental pain? I have experienced it over the summer, but never to this extent.",2.4299122073578587,5.068836932692308,3.8783026755852856,83.36452341137127,81.11538461538461,6.309698996655519,24.42809364548495,7.586124646067393,1.4823580267558527,854,32,156,14,23,281,121,208,0.209,0.6759999999999999,0.115,-0.977,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,1,4,12,16,0,2,8,0,19,5,2,2,3,34,36,15,0,2,11,0,3,5,0,1,3,0,0,1,16,8,0,0,9,0,0,2,9,8,0,2,7,5,27,8,16,26,1,26,0,5,0,0,4,8,3,1,20,114,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.12271879665600875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793086081474402,0.12885091842106844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665911641116735,0.0,0.10700829243807468,0.0,0.0,0.333660389451688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381360266980332,0.08110160923991963,0.0,0.10831264756706516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004909909266786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050522147932532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612006015602646,0.0,0.10595406051020816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12717107213195922,0.1796788777587856,0.12074457713281325,0.0,0.2298756903455564,0.10696718847040597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13140365537665086,0.0,0.14293899548028968,0.0,0.10057780818082797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.222409565739019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367174655425262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12384340113978973,0.0,0.13462339099221055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20733507402565726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859306742480225,0.0,0.3071878471117244,0.0,0.0,0.1112892694419704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394247801535601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266849912791116,0.1267315210060734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19398010725080034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066537020963315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956423886865724,0.13381224857520888,0.14754646564296134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980446643451568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12416794901008943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901007762434772,0.0,0.10042815211775426,0.0,0.14405199456553114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381186899265164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12355370642785556,0.0998354694281419,0.07332878587404708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376109335138528,0.07417359167144555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281551481095734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,user201120,2020/02/07,Anxiety I'm not really sure why I feel this way but sometimes when I'm in the shower or just walking I get this feeling and voice in my head that makes me start to hyperventilate but the feeling feels so familiar like I know I've felt that way and heard that voice before but I cant remember what memory and it's not my voice it's a mixture of women and men voices just talking and I cant even understand them so I just wanted to know what's wrong,1.5658333333333303,3.4748297500000014,3.6887500000000015,87.61458333333336,79.625,7.183333333333334,22.125,8.167268648758528,1.1486750000000003,360,11,78,7,9,123,59,96,0.079,0.8370000000000001,0.084,0.1162,1,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,0,3,0,2,1,1,1,1,26,17,12,0,1,9,0,5,1,0,0,0,5,1,2,9,5,0,0,9,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,2,10,10,2,5,15,0,7,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,3,47,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16836436599243176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18727606200677305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536401795380627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44512620559448507,0.0,0.2113160428869766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498529016559768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22587062858051896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419058392250489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107522377925457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14690839709364903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409920391933545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493133181677619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176696193727504,0.0,0.1557772433949601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074274381585686,0.0,0.0,0.1768959268514068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291161696796476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981179155966194,0.3493863403002764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19859241369619632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406283170724561,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,McZomb,2020/02/07,Poem about a man from Northern Ireland's battle with depression Poem by Dean Irwin can be found here: [WATCH HERE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xdSfqXUzF1k&t=2s) \#TimeToTalk,14.3988,18.757677880000006,8.637,55.40350000000001,50.2,11.4,40.5,11.20814326018867,5.980600000000001,157,7,15,4,2,41,24,25,0.259,0.741,0.0,-0.743,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,0,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6136069991767542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4877702012478378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6209401592230466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mensmentalhealth2020,2020/02/07,"{Academic} ""Investigating men's mental health literacy, self stigma and attitudes towards seeking professional psychological help"" (Men, 18+). Hi, 

I am currently in my final year of my undergraduate psychology degree and for my final project I am carrying out an online survey to investigate men's mental health literacy, self stigma and whether that plays a role on their attitudes towards help seeking. 

It is entirely anonymous and takes between 10 and 15 minutes to complete. 

Thank you, 

Ellen

[http://ucdpsychology.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_bfmmMue4dGplaV7](http://ucdpsychology.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_bfmmMue4dGplaV7)",19.320121951219512,20.83153454878049,15.14158536585366,23.01774390243904,38.878048780487816,15.517073170731713,50.987804878048784,14.191785591663535,8.0526,531,25,50,15,4,158,60,82,0.0,0.879,0.121,0.836,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,7,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,2,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,10,5,0,9,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,0,4,30,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22124012559440884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.462302606188553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4485878401956701,0.0,0.0,0.28287130866984805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4252971982359277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4402592080390273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15865337079669878,0.0,0.0,0.1942697942170117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588361710477476
mentalhealth,BastardPro,2020/02/07,i can't break the cycle (repost)  for about a year and a half i have struggled with mental health issues. most causes have been out of my control. anyways during this time period i feel happy and it's like a cycle we're the mental health problems keep coming back around. i can't trust anyone close to me and my mental health is really unstable right now worse then ever before. i just don't what to do,3.9274074074074083,5.236586617283951,4.971296296296295,83.46583333333334,71.71604938271605,6.881481481481483,19.672839506172842,7.1686216300943375,0.4772617283950611,320,5,60,3,6,105,60,81,0.16899999999999998,0.754,0.077,-0.7576,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,1,5,0,8,3,0,2,1,16,11,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,8,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,1,1,8,3,8,10,1,13,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,8,43,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951610344989486,0.0,0.0,0.15216123145156674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314322801937166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14544625209538575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558907010824915,0.0,0.14723843961501265,0.0,0.0,0.19170911787842726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461321947950624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642580586569644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18195492541845745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.54506209110695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17840333618278684,0.0,0.15192773410146254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350627794104172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5167625143634899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355401484403925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950018628231034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14597068840640598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17868996897203665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099668883906892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741891731433172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11007135704495563
mentalhealth,MustardButter,2020/02/07,Spousal Therapy How do I get my wife to see a therapist.  She's counter offered to just increase her meds when I ask her to see a therapist.  I know this won't solve the problems she's experiencing.  I'm getting close to the point where I'm ready to offer up an ultimatum of divorce because I think it's the only thing that will work but I'm coming here for alternatives.,3.247543859649124,4.763830421052635,5.0315789473684225,81.5493859649123,73.73684210526315,8.224561403508767,31.08771929824561,8.841846274778883,2.5351035087719307,296,14,61,6,6,101,55,76,0.02,0.903,0.077,0.4084,0,0,0,0,1,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,6,0,3,0,0,1,0,8,14,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,3,9,0,8,12,1,7,0,0,2,0,9,4,0,0,1,36,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22268092846264112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14520195504203165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051845991856066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24889495931601394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309061879252418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645818477264005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18115864716850744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22517203232529154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279212213109412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796224428217454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723976679300675,0.5531273891565363,0.15824671217706118,0.1526262572484615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17340938672124925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Feisty_Mushroom,2020/02/07,"Am I losing my mind? I am a college student taking a full load of courses, as well as working two jobs to make ends meet. I have a 4.0 GPA (I only mention this to note how much time I spend studying instead of sleeping). I was diagnosed with generalized anxiety and depression as a teenager, but slowly was able to ween off of them with the assistance of therapy. I haven't taken medication in about five years. A couple of months ago I experienced a traumatic event that has really messed with my mental health. I think about it almost nonstop. Lately panic attacks have been happening more and more frequently, multiple times a day. I had a night where I stayed awake, having attack after attack until exhaustion finally knocked me out. I have booked an appointment to see about going back on medication for next week. What finally made me realize that I needed to book it was when I depersonalized for the first time ever. I was driving and suddenly had the feeling that I was not real, and that my surroundings were not real. I contemplated driving off the road to see what would happen. I feel like I'm spiraling. Like I am not in control of my thoughts. I am anxious every waking hour. I feel like I'm in a crisis. I don't have enough time to sleep. I have no days off. I have days where I have straight classes for 12 hours to give me days off to work 8 hour days. I even have a day where I go from one 8 hour job to another job. I'm stuck in this routine because I need to have money to live, and I need to finish my degree. My parents do not support me. Can anyone give me any sort of reassurance that I'm okay? Any advice to keep myself going? Has anyone else experienced something like this?",3.718108108108108,5.496203453453457,5.165945945945946,79.99234234234235,73.02402402402402,8.176576576576577,27.64864864864865,8.841846274778883,2.2678540540540544,1342,51,252,27,27,450,180,333,0.151,0.779,0.071,-0.9835,5,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,1,5,13,16,3,1,15,1,30,8,3,4,1,36,58,12,0,4,5,1,3,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,12,9,0,2,6,2,2,5,7,8,1,4,13,7,42,8,46,44,5,57,0,2,2,0,7,17,0,2,38,175,54,11,0.08189815170184693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002992598945685,0.07259777003197647,0.0,0.08200916876589676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138710312908802,0.08587735289077958,0.06265186188681404,0.0925216000410134,0.0,0.114530183793612,0.08391433469434546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795129122857329,0.0,0.06297462338751103,0.0,0.04992435312628443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185574107481,0.0,0.09061874713035256,0.0,0.31690519549587576,0.0,0.0705387580542635,0.08312490003482463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841539680559944,0.0,0.07253745374854734,0.08462268346392539,0.0,0.05409295679920546,0.0740815669719924,0.06900272504712518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12423049879373325,0.11701611187964785,0.0,0.17943084407868806,0.0,0.06966252599990083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571283395057094,0.13963382086741866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448445301542874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705390552883467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32261272919979944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24381383541589816,0.07279484022536893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238468235208074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004520034436195,0.0,0.07231756839642586,0.0,0.0,0.09162308301847402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749401135475288,0.054667652210553086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16500754343412394,0.08253407426460573,0.0,0.08269378668018171,0.0,0.06537032333447054,0.0,0.060204564822967765,0.18217932527762196,0.0,0.0,0.08709961344918803,0.07685586743923657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055496307133996885,0.06228723484131118,0.0,0.09608983507956696,0.0909382054720876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18643605284782205,0.05246605310223066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305244470338528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16391459513510298,0.0,0.0,0.06304919836175918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729253281834795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929370520142492,0.0,0.0,0.06157721772905205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365767396575662,0.0,0.0,0.05247702870811639,0.0,0.06501798433894877,0.19102188345934665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000259394582797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06569375727486425,0.0,0.0736362739525789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924565968244735,0.0,0.0,0.05817809719622673,0.0,0.0,0.052739724559611824
mentalhealth,bunnykins22,2020/02/07,"Confusion All Around This probably seems silly, but I have been kind of struggling with my mental condition for a while but only recently began looking into getting help as the result of my doctor randomly doing a Depression test on me (It was VERY basic). She came away with the concern that I may have moderate recurrent episodes of Depression.

So she recommended a psychiatrist to go and see to find out more. I went to the psychiatrist, and she came away saying that I definitely have a problem with Anxiety but the issues with mood swings and depression need to be tested through hormone testing to see if it is a hormonal problem or not. She told me to go see an OBGYN, they don't do hormone testing I guess so that did nothing. They also while they were doing the typical questionnaire said that I was diagnosed with Anxiety (for like sure which I didn't know). Then I go to my account with them online and it says I have GAD which like NOBODY told me I had ANY legit diagnosis for anything so one I am SO confused. The Psychiatrist wanted me to get my hormones tested to see if I need medication or therapy or whatever. THAT wasn't done.

So I'm kind of like completely stumped about what the hell is going on with me? Am I the only one who looks at all of that and is like...what the fuck? Do I have an official diagnosis!? Also how can I even see if I have a possible mood disorder or depression if the OBGYN isn't doing what my psychiatrist wanted done? 

Also, I went to seek out therapy because now I'm unsure if I can even take medication but I have NO FUCKING clue what to tell the therapist????",4.585108695652174,6.027473993589744,6.227998885172799,74.57207357859534,70.28205128205127,9.913266443701227,31.193422519509483,10.176274734539398,3.4186171683389066,1274,55,232,35,23,437,148,312,0.18600000000000005,0.745,0.068,-0.993,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,4,0,14,21,3,3,19,0,33,6,0,2,3,51,66,31,0,11,14,0,0,3,0,1,4,3,0,0,16,18,0,0,3,0,1,8,6,12,0,2,18,10,37,7,38,46,3,23,1,4,7,2,16,9,3,15,9,183,53,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21491849932765536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060919517919646775,0.0,0.13706151307264908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371918327946156,0.07974787053721147,0.0,0.0,0.16833237132918505,0.0,0.0,0.05460897068808362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20491819377407067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939260803439449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086308568658089,0.09092486822952364,0.0,0.0,0.10266988919840583,0.09169200546899213,0.0,0.1833490411276356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833746487640992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08187724711470046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16563609623764514,0.09360684939652167,0.0,0.20364835338045065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868578387639028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06004560247318995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350138679601892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18657383653114387,0.049232478841135255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750629323582022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045433067775674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18049091352097374,0.09027860272687337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284933185340506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595731301547717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140753038547665,0.13626382992232036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099138233319363,0.0,0.0,0.09658563505808336,0.171437681953504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845241382019968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521395567612622,0.14248000840080974,0.0,0.0,0.3569302983315625,0.08155300671353356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365161135946884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443092562732292,0.0,0.06735527387833395,0.0,0.0782994982264894,0.0,0.2048919556102315,0.10401277783237096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17120080781730462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391536415574793,0.10567675921779313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16608869331193482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bah_rodXx,2020/02/07,"I can’t grow emotional attachment to people anymore. Lately I‘ve been feeling empty inside I don’t think I can grow emotionally attached to people anymore. Expect for my parents since they have been with me through thick and thin even if they are a bit close minded. Although I can open up to them a bit I still feel like I need to put a fake mask when I interact with them. As for school, once I step into school I just feel a rush of depression and being drained. Every person I talk to drains my energy and I don’t even see the point of opening up to people and making friends anymore. The friends I made a while ago are growing apart from me but I don’t even see the point in maintaining the friendship anymore because I don’t even think I can benefit anything from that friendship to begin with. Every if I do wanna open to some people in my school a part of me is scared of people leaving me and burdening them because of multiple incidents that has happened with me in the past that’s affected my state of mind. I keep reminding of myself of the past and it keep hindering me from interacting with others. I see people enjoy having fun with their friends and I’m just alone. I don’t find joy in anything anymore and a part of me wants to end it all but the only thing keeping me here is my parents and two friends that aren’t even in the same school as me.  I don’t know if I should even put the effort in it anymore why would anyone care about my problems all they would do is give me shitty advice that I’ve heard multiple times or pity me, which I don’t want.",5.0193396226415095,5.4324925377358495,5.565088050314468,83.4832924528302,68.59119496855347,8.372578616352202,29.736477987421388,8.238735603445708,1.9706183647798747,1249,44,251,16,20,403,149,318,0.091,0.75,0.159,0.97,3,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,7,1,12,16,0,1,16,0,28,0,0,3,2,56,51,20,0,12,8,2,5,1,4,3,0,1,0,1,11,20,0,3,7,0,0,7,9,6,0,1,4,9,47,10,43,43,8,36,0,2,3,0,19,18,0,5,11,180,58,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303642306046199,0.0662537342093767,0.0,0.0,0.077409541099347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4447402624358638,0.05226091898326072,0.0,0.1230115941742776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112331745581201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16319648402959666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620383021138043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437465125345075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814801175850844,0.06619868873058235,0.0,0.0,0.2961959063587191,0.0,0.12594569235339545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337448029261753,0.05339526524901584,0.0,0.0,0.06831227806742828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309800556590594,0.0,0.0,0.07169875354151117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609356594766841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19930074962280486,0.0,0.0,0.04107591428706664,0.0,0.08431154547689915,0.07914034213052631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03651486870888505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072211210970769,0.04989045941512127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509349987213786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05541979498851806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959714299132169,0.0,0.05684419645390735,0.0,0.0,0.16598294113363546,0.16187528768747095,0.14269823131062864,0.31089762160752604,0.06526130042584755,0.0,0.0,0.14130954764216794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071517417924646,0.0,0.150271484976625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482917195132285,0.3025691150902781,0.17867763743564913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061826851668313434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059688572053470564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06007429958993068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04965485962594204,0.09578253190405103,0.0,0.0,0.04358230662359066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301147945746718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881688187542205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744248083617123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618828062482703,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kateeyxoox,2020/02/07,I’m scared My 9 year old brother has extreme mental health issues and he hasn’t spoken for months due to his depression and ocd and the last words I heard him say were “I want to die” and I’m always so horrible to him because he’s making everyone else suffer especially my mum as I’ve now friend anorexic and my brother and dad have Autism. Any tips on how to start being nice to him even when he spends hours doing his habits (throwing his neck back and making noises) and rituals ?,4.192901325478644,5.401584402061857,4.898821796759941,84.6215463917526,70.95876288659794,7.604712812960236,25.19734904270987,7.957251820313856,1.3480998527245949,385,11,76,5,7,124,70,97,0.17300000000000001,0.758,0.068,-0.9215,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,1,0,6,2,1,3,0,13,13,12,1,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,3,0,0,2,2,11,2,8,10,0,12,1,2,0,0,16,1,0,0,10,40,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19684287711786425,0.0,0.0,0.1608738210780203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18190558890031008,0.0,0.1442091808953133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037549989810972,0.0,0.2455194240564725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976215557366723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625041695556866,0.0,0.0,0.22605011551093795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18277124648089896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514598912938494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232971057765246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469147144238717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19283385759812302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158209111618169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384041154333041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18882569713181926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482375013312125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18812774757098416,0.23684505558980945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744349513224416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953347494420604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234153280159074
mentalhealth,demonsinmybedroom,2020/02/07,"Struggling with Highschool So I am currently in highschool and tuned 18 this year. For pretty much my entire life school has been hard for me and when I got to highschool I became even worse. For some reason I can make it through the first semester (barely) but when it gets to the second I can't seem to bring myself to do anything. Because of this I am behind on 8 credits and will be stuck at school for an extra year. I don't know why this happens but I start to feel like shit around this time and get really really sad. I do take Wellbutrin and Concerta now to help with my motivation and ADD but it's not like that would be an explanation because I have only started this medication within the last year. And other than during these last few months, they have been working really well. I am getting really annoyed with myself because I can't seem to figure out what's wrong with me. I think I may be ruining things for myself, maybe I don't believe I deserve to be happy or whatever, who knows. Do you have any idea as to what I could do to get out of this place I am in? 
ps. I do go to therapy and see a psychiatrist already :)",3.6928050346776256,4.9572878515283865,4.915931158489599,83.81038787567431,72.23144104803494,7.833650141279218,26.1343436938094,8.313332769828598,1.6324351913691242,894,29,180,14,17,296,132,229,0.115,0.759,0.126,0.5563,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,1,3,7,11,2,1,6,0,28,3,1,3,0,36,48,16,0,2,5,0,2,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,16,16,0,0,10,0,1,2,5,6,1,2,4,3,28,5,34,36,4,25,0,2,1,0,4,9,1,5,16,137,44,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387235174699496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548674503769639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344817622672156,0.11190807328623306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22989396403993945,0.0,0.0,0.1416315157900883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036877647183404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302991417004031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356248122057717,0.08980686489319163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692840430429056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26271202207139505,0.0,0.07144358432770337,0.0,0.10054134067639237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111644622363012,0.13382006003941382,0.11261098625082465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426040265175863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14191068138319346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138173265645905,0.20493997977621795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879231080213379,0.12283058677349346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391204214938587,0.0,0.12629205125131007,0.0,0.0,0.12663905783151558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034009336699072,0.0,0.09241091901208598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560771066667176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133963207398736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278917163957582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32213080176700376,0.12925026399356596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25444937405068874,0.10017416569167796,0.2288823460872788,0.0,0.0,0.1290389564254371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779556086959461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13141882431204185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945178708172997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375972568126674,0.0,0.08351578082664482,0.08054954743382865,0.0,0.0,0.07330219832086328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302790359158192,0.0,0.11343323675365265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151798565325302,0.0,0.12810868161247366,0.08930039514589669,0.13744356268245356,0.0,0.2428583162753153
mentalhealth,wholeassmeal,2020/02/07,"Best ""self-help"" resources? I need some kind of book. A resource. Not any of those cushy touchy-feely bullshit inspirational books.

I need something that targets unhealthy relationships, anxiety, depression

Pretty much something to help me become healthy. Help me cope with my bad relationship habits, my horrible anxiety, my constant fear and anger and jealousy.

Some kind of guide to help me be fucking normal.",6.765117270788911,10.33172470149254,5.226439232409383,74.63940298507465,70.6417910447761,8.007675906183369,36.437100213219615,8.841846274778883,3.937581663113007,333,18,47,7,7,97,50,67,0.314,0.46399999999999997,0.222,-0.8402,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,0,9,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,10,4,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,8,4,6,3,4,1,0,1,0,1,5,0,1,2,1,25,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163134031032052,0.0,0.26169102390110804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14281167052386787,0.0,0.1889007908285063,0.0,0.0,0.1794964491096927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18483401387159776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731692932989893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19246811107246886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812418325061342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4585793587041211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35622471414797235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573444537455095,0.2536487223723286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16758337160094544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17400967548993804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3672669670482841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843254078638354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26335066155320996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gruwantshisslaves,2020/02/07,"Im scared people will be angry at me if I kill myself Kinda fucking sad that my reason not to commit suicide makes no god damn sense. Like how df would people be angry at me if I was dead? Maybe im scared that if I failed to do it properly I'd be yelled at, but I don't think that's it. Im scared I will feel people being angry at me from beyond the grave. Makes no sense.
I spent the better part of my life being a good little girl that never says what she actually thinks and just scrambles out whatever the fuck it is people want to hear this time. Because I don't like it when people are angry at me and if im myself people are angry at me and I don't want people to be angry at me. Makes no god damn sense",1.258461538461539,2.5347543757961795,3.5505732484076447,91.11705046545816,78.49044585987261,5.595100440960313,16.535521803037724,5.8734145424116955,-0.5320441940225384,555,7,126,3,13,192,79,157,0.335,0.5670000000000001,0.098,-0.9926,0,0,0,0,0,3,8.0,0,0,0,2,4,15,5,3,4,0,17,3,0,5,2,25,29,10,4,7,7,0,1,2,0,3,1,3,0,1,10,4,0,0,4,0,1,0,8,11,0,0,2,4,19,4,15,18,1,13,0,3,0,2,4,10,4,5,5,82,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.11177069482335876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982013301384002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129785759602468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057912884908184074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21177352595164672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606743215863353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290904895897417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4948744958312171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671720573009804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809002225443488,0.1119130892693218,0.11479524471438307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293611740490807,0.0,0.11506688990875727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833728801181988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403141625603728,0.0,0.5558342888249631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776216911728392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108369021619704,0.34401179971243273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12528388466858406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678019423922276,0.0,0.0,0.06678691097884254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511269837334464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136314704885139,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Djileum1,2020/02/07,Men are 3x more likely to die by suicide when compared to women. Women are 2x more likely to be diagnosed with an anxiety disorder when compared to men. Many statistics show that these mental health disparities exist. Do any of you know why these disparities occur?,5.990744680851063,8.57832036170213,6.81803191489362,67.10875000000001,68.78723404255321,9.806382978723407,30.89893617021277,10.125756701596842,3.886621276595745,215,9,31,6,4,71,35,47,0.233,0.767,0.0,-0.9196,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,2,5,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,7,4,2,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20588884083950984,0.0,0.23161243730998216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072975027142228,0.3142196118910837,0.0,0.3469919854596128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32182231508637515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663903186763072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958288693677565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069535929303889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051133282532441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3311729681799377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27319600971571345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayaccount1825,2020/02/07,"How to cope with depression alone? I (17) have had depression for a very long time now. Never talked to a professional about it cause I just simply can’t. I know I have depression. It could only be more obvious that I do if I were to write it on my forehead. My family doesn’t get it. I’m not close enough with them to talk to them about it. And if I’m gonna be honest I don’t want them to know about it at all. But I live with them I can’t just go to therapy and they wouldn’t know about it. I manage, suicide is not anywhere near an option. It won’t matter what the comments say, I’m not in a position to get help. So I was just hoping someone has an advice on how to cope with depression.",0.6506054872280025,2.2885891456953655,2.99523651844844,92.79875827814571,81.3841059602649,6.698391674550615,19.394985808893093,7.7094869923839395,0.4263846736045411,535,13,128,9,14,184,84,151,0.14300000000000002,0.78,0.077,-0.9159,0,1,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,5,0,11,6,0,0,6,0,17,1,1,3,3,32,29,8,1,6,9,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,10,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,10,4,0,0,3,1,18,2,23,20,3,11,0,4,0,0,11,6,0,4,4,93,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684343608822219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785195117025509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770676783774009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376204710348413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5938353926185452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17810047215666025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16249161458534353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18010856311537715,0.0,0.09795974478532248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553350265034387,0.0,0.0,0.1711986355463629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841840446458154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15220260749726364,0.1525387581639148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329395224575939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109234404389225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13707260607090938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14604541306942045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18854076431738892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770830178389378,0.0,0.0,0.19711589459942716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050818008763376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422202554200729,0.1016661140723836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaaaaaway001,2020/02/07,"I made a self-help page on Instagram! Hi I recently made an Instagram page to share useful life insights and self-help advices. My story is that I suffered through depression and anxiety and whilst I'm on the road I thought about sharing what's helping me, what I'm discovering, and inviting people to share their ideas and minds too.

My hope is to make a difference in the life of people who are dealing with mental illnesses or even just difficult times in life. 

This is the page https://www.instagram.com/spiritual.selfhelp/ I hope you check it out and follow if you like.",7.193571428571433,8.667073961538463,6.65620879120879,73.80307692307693,64.19230769230771,9.78901098901099,33.12637362637363,9.957137785484203,3.2923835164835165,468,19,81,10,7,145,69,104,0.124,0.675,0.201,0.784,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,1,0,4,9,0,0,6,0,4,4,0,4,0,21,14,8,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,3,0,11,6,12,11,3,10,0,2,0,0,10,6,0,4,4,50,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784785920868758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13140060749931814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17708332189392198,0.14794190278530894,0.0,0.0,0.17945903116874026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344989870677598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34539361776012056,0.0,0.0,0.34120501690268024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19390303590295807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639704593387667,0.0839162473359204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32505850146862736,0.1146552152592924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17309984366235606,0.0,0.1734348106976499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381619929401371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16959831611657086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583790365822844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636310850511374,0.10015820271059188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483507735277546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VaultyBoi76,2020/02/07,"How can i help a person cope with a brothers death told from a friend's perspective\*\* two days ago my best friend was awoken by 3 police officers in his room, one kneeled down and told him that his brother had been in a car accident during the night and the hospital wasn't able to save him. My friend is only fourteen and he has neither slept or eaten in the last two days. It's gotten so bad that his parents reached out to me asking me to help him. 

Does anybody know how I might be able to help him? I am very worried he is considering suicide since he has a history of depression, and the only person that could help him then was his brother.",6.3716466739367545,5.643872358778629,6.571166848418759,81.28274809160305,65.87022900763358,9.623118865866957,32.45474372955289,8.841846274778883,2.449143075245366,513,18,105,7,7,165,83,131,0.16399999999999998,0.6859999999999999,0.15,-0.6139,1,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,9,0,14,2,1,2,0,13,21,9,2,1,1,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,2,4,6,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,3,10,0,16,5,13,8,2,13,0,1,0,0,28,6,0,2,6,70,20,0,0.29841546893567383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226365392619666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394890901638271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458222586941148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15658431193831407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913023482871395,0.0,0.0,0.1924532901677203,0.0,0.12851240306091288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057269392598306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34583257657218713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4000431969989351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200066874415966,0.12162421808232393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15828582716761666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14002135118893375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110702240192547,0.2269584112416195,0.0,0.0,0.16567753158164186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605648770534123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12342617982197855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16320904411255316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28514876888201024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915085516865964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311200723403705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515276970678752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Some_one_Thing_Where,2020/02/07,"How do I know I'm not faking it? I've supposedly been depressed for years at this point and I'm finally starting to actually do something about it and get the help I need. But every so often I can't help but feel like I'm subconsciously faking it for the attention and taking resources away from people who really need it. 
Writing it out now makes it sound silly but I was just wondering if anyone else has ever felt like this or knows what I can do about it.",4.7923758865248205,5.267085755319151,6.211489361702127,78.43333333333334,69.1063829787234,9.245390070921985,27.368794326241137,9.2995712137729,2.1637219858156027,367,11,73,7,6,125,64,94,0.023,0.807,0.17,0.8971,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,2,1,24,22,10,0,3,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,11,4,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,3,5,3,9,19,0,9,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,4,7,50,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.2122350189050351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15207130786707768,0.2228401667242685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20433530976811365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18732042222095013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816816934341266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19672858988115485,0.1832413831312468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996748515125868,0.1553720825867639,0.20882072110188293,0.2382453448246513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136274883839838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915526392146781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390492983665657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21250540362420234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451736318639355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3225263110405191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507774478853046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20559462158455927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932713717210982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16743139209697672,0.0,0.0,0.15393775054929296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16352244840097846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358543514979136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14005389015671765
mentalhealth,EatingYourForskinUwO,2020/02/07,"help me understand what's happening (Yeah haha username I know)

I'm very warry of sharing this since I don't want to be labeled as a fourteen y/o who listens to Billie Ellish and thinks I'm depressed because I listen to her...

I'm a 15 F and ever since the new year started, I started to believe nothing in life matters, there's no point of doing anything since we all are going to die anyway so why go through the stress of life, I don't really see it in a depressing way, in fact, I don't know how I feel about it, but I know it's not in a depressing way. I brought this up with my mom and she says that it maybe be because I'm not getting out more and not eating right so she bought some multivitamin gummies and was getting me out more, but that was like on Jan 24 and I still feel the same.

another thing that pushes this belief is the afterlife, I believe that when I die I will be in my fantasy world, a world I have dreamed of ever since and it's very tempting, even if I am wrong, it's still is, basically I am suicidal but not depressed, I'm also getting more careless about everyone and everything and started to get easily irritated now.

I have been procrastinating more and more at school and I'm having a hard time sleeping and the thoughts are getting worse and it's really tiring. I have been having suicidal thoughts since I was like 7 since I believed my parents would argue less at night if I wasn't here, but they had argued less and less as I get older and since we figured out my dad has Bipolar 1 and a whole lot of other disorders.

I'm am quite desperate to talk to someone to help me understand, but I have no money and my parents won't let me see someone since I have to be ""strong-minded and learn how to get myself out the hole"". I did get a pet Betta so it can help get that thought out, but it hasn't worked.

even though I don't see this in a depressing way, I still want to understand and cry when I get very frustrated when I don't understand.

Mental illness does run on my dad's side of the family, like bipolar 1, dementia, and anxiety and I just want to make sure that its just hormones changing and this belief will pass when I'm older.",5.152967277711156,4.892193285077951,6.256358574610246,80.96597353092342,68.26503340757239,9.402124378961798,31.968562617783107,9.057496981413335,2.52562251156416,1711,66,357,28,26,575,198,449,0.185,0.746,0.069,-0.9947,2,0,0,0,0,1,38.0,2,0,1,2,27,17,3,1,16,2,40,8,1,3,5,77,88,43,4,6,14,5,3,3,0,4,6,3,1,0,25,30,1,0,17,2,2,6,14,11,0,0,13,9,47,6,41,66,13,49,2,5,3,0,22,21,0,4,22,242,72,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05242140611382344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687363259355929,0.05014661787026477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05394319135618631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991901224473738,0.0,0.0,0.2215618361870539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06934465661068012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07200510080175718,0.0,0.0,0.2822964903725137,0.0,0.13606394361073434,0.0,0.07512754798914133,0.0,0.05736444476307598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707541541391111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659212200215224,0.11858993231155007,0.0,0.06263714223076232,0.05891334368904631,0.0,0.061795996779694974,0.0,0.06628948353890676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34247884774471443,0.0,0.07450870727995766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05796685912836206,0.0,0.05872115103144735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181310265049526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807595427362758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703071605332253,0.09260174103137528,0.09607526331146207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05572942979272054,0.0,0.0,0.04375604782854995,0.0,0.06585516087285988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660603621150213,0.0,0.06618819610481548,0.076772971127437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330992066579016,0.0,0.0615155192438784,0.0,0.06289830649479433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455740756070384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06196723178888399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972194981908314,0.0,0.0,0.08398777105241335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05598051096750028,0.0,0.052129079675637256,0.0,0.0663414850581611,0.15670786240859808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4337981586703832,0.0,0.0655987094242217,0.0,0.11108292447899852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919278912786284,0.0,0.1570482239013769,0.0,0.07508887172540148,0.0,0.0,0.14340511655731314,0.0,0.0617813895228477,0.0,0.0,0.05268770736809331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04354941682605815,0.04200267041300288,0.06440388722933438,0.15612139450366405,0.038223530419573055,0.07534165568046461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729651477282431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16226023358264316,0.11599168745759625,0.15609487666394764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05914991466783628,0.07318576252473845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047722177351937976,0.0,0.06680244523078742,0.046565811783676914,0.07167013158556237,0.0,0.04221293245605028
mentalhealth,mlimp,2020/02/07,"It feels like I'm always acting Hi all. I've been meaning to look this up but always put it off because it sounds so... Unreal. And the fact that I couldn't really pinpoint what this is. I'm using the app so I'm sorry for the weird format. 

 To those of you who might know what this is, please let me know. (and yes I plan to go to therapy if this gets worse)

For context, it feels like I shift my personality when faced with people but go back to a blank state of mind when alone. For example, a few days ago I was happily chatting away with my friend, and up until the moment we separated I was all smiles and giggling. As soon as she left me though, it felt like the curtains of the theatre dropped and my act was finished. I couldn't go back to that state of happiness and took on another role. I'm aware of these personality changes so I don't think this could be a case of MPD, but idk. 

I sound so fake and a horrible friend but I can't help it. Any help would be appreciated.",2.1068263988522204,3.6014530829268314,3.733428981348638,89.77383070301292,76.70731707317074,7.164992826398853,22.30272596843616,7.928766900206844,0.8110889526542326,762,21,175,12,17,254,117,205,0.102,0.7040000000000001,0.19399999999999998,0.9763,0,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,1,0,1,10,9,0,0,10,1,16,1,1,1,3,32,34,22,0,5,5,0,3,3,2,2,0,2,1,2,18,10,0,0,7,1,0,7,4,2,0,0,6,6,17,7,25,20,3,26,0,0,1,0,13,6,0,2,13,111,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12834686660287478,0.0,0.0,0.14995791805288966,0.0,0.0,0.2409523830437557,0.0,0.0,0.0984616032991978,0.15182407325770594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603419506773715,0.2226678748871512,0.0,0.0882621365382398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15316774764999008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560237377429435,0.0,0.0,0.09337703907009794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641951352559826,0.2068748295600416,0.1390203129395306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22372751321390605,0.0,0.07564636742139794,0.0,0.24686107262284426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413076798356776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940982625100471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914468684686256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15731386111350484,0.14805674010176265,0.0,0.21221003038365246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158644000908983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15771785680172107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15359843268766693,0.14619579090725565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10037858254024486,0.2528486437795667,0.0,0.15893503359329994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555311082964714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275565235303154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620796261412575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16557903888127512,0.0,0.0,0.09277505631852362,0.14225462824343715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16086609971179766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125051358376967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14755253791156064,0.10285407494974408,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,georgiegirl93,2020/02/07,"BBC Podcast 'The Next Episode' investigates deaths in CAMHS inpatient units WARNING: could be triggering as it has references to suicide and self harm.

Christie Harnett died in a children and adolescent mental health service (CAMHS) unit in Middlesbrough.

She is one of 16 suicides in CAMHS units in England since 2016.

Hosted by Georgia Coan.

\#TheNextEpisode // TheNextEpisode@bbc.co.uk

[https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p0816xy2](https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/p0816xy2)",13.65,18.620416142857145,7.047857142857144,63.23464285714286,54.23809523809525,9.914285714285716,48.5952380952381,10.125756701596842,6.5096476190476205,399,24,40,9,6,99,54,63,0.21100000000000002,0.789,0.0,-0.9406,0,0,0,0,0,2,34.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,1,0,5,4,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,20,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303992774440485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.299489598400251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3067359014333774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908101998954859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30689695406010403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955421723076136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010409399044146,0.0,0.0,0.23870768566477146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6312964276437836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shadowdragon12534,2020/02/07,"How do I not keep everything inside? I can't really express my emotions or feelings when I try doing it is if there's like a barrier inside my mind. It wasn't all the time like this when I was about 7-10 years old I could do it but people often sad that I'm weird, stupid, boring so I stopped and  I'm 15 now it's really hard living with this i sometimes get asked things like why don't you talk to me",0.18466916354557128,2.0179324606741598,2.5857677902621745,94.13710362047442,83.94382022471909,5.7533083645443215,17.754057428214733,6.937597516519254,-0.05067890137328357,315,7,74,4,9,108,64,89,0.221,0.703,0.075,-0.9198,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,8,7,1,0,2,0,9,0,0,1,1,15,15,8,0,2,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,2,11,3,3,12,1,7,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,3,10,46,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22239308510706204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18993414052647487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26759188203567696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21379831610323285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202832759822316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428661549965525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21310084310324587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21144570637477456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486600526967613,0.0,0.21005938450510347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401989767854777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24962334647173104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649215252211944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047941756462966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23527722763473466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19888494625338848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19120529254109625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804215822196108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13871435446541885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16151027679885388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21465683938059335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15319201579388664
mentalhealth,Purple--Unicorn,2020/02/07,"Help - It's ruining my life... I'm a straight female - early 30s and 8 years ago...

One day in the office lunch room, I was not paying attention and daydreaming when a lady I worked with acussed me of staring at her chest. I was absolutely mortified, and apologised saying sorry, I was day dreaming at definitely not looking at her chest. I already have anxiety but from then on something changed in my head and now everyday is a struggle.

Every interaction with someone, I am constantly thinking of where I am looking, and I mean constantly. And intentionly adverting my eyes from anything I know I am not suppose to stare at, womens chests, mens crotch, people with hand deformities, people with burns on their face. It's nothing to do with attraction (or being repulsed), It can be an old lady, but its just I know social conformities its not something you are suppose to stare at. 

I try my best to ""act normal"" but I feel like its so obvious and people know what I am thinking or trying to avoid and I hate it. I often think about how it would just be better if I was blind as it's causing me so much stress.

I stress if it's going to be a hot day and people will be in more revealing clothes, I worry that guys are intentionally crossing their legs around me becuase the know what i'm stressing over, I avoid lunches with friends becuase it means eye contact over lunch. 

I thought it would just be something that went away, something I would ""grow"" out of, but its getting worse. And I'm scared to talk to a doctor as I feel they will judge me and then treat me differently after they know what goes on in my head.

But i hate it, and I hate how much it's controlling my life.

​

I feel like here is a good place to start to ask for help, anonminity and the mentalhealth subreddit I hope people keep their judgements to themselves (please do so for my mental health, I already feel like a freak)",5.811775855941242,6.393062242506819,6.162743750740436,79.29907593886983,66.90190735694823,9.107404335979153,32.57777514512499,9.085049710711278,2.7185435138016842,1501,61,286,25,23,483,184,367,0.138,0.7290000000000001,0.133,-0.4308,1,2,4,0,0,0,50.0,0,1,5,4,15,22,3,7,11,0,27,19,11,6,1,70,57,32,0,7,16,0,6,3,1,5,5,1,1,3,20,21,3,4,17,1,1,5,4,12,0,1,6,15,48,10,45,40,4,42,0,1,8,0,20,21,0,6,19,197,68,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428947168536022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18496527786274009,0.0,0.0,0.09080438844507666,0.10183416109112388,0.0,0.0,0.06411180009558835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896567002171837,0.07460561932102044,0.0783478340914778,0.0,0.07873903547637577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794982947170042,0.07412010466669744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609243758386474,0.08865624345440366,0.0,0.0,0.181130268383667,0.0939961995073569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16214492220191307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756003302114057,0.0,0.08577958017836433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061065355510536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950048867029388,0.17961430068137946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474875155919174,0.0,0.043785476181826974,0.0,0.04762920760550319,0.07029297850558107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298168479522107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24822492533825724,0.17201944724657547,0.08908246970996274,0.0,0.0,0.11234756062673357,0.0,0.0,0.08323883828082754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449113408553598,0.0,0.0,0.23028950804009546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839012403321685,0.12283097718555964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075283069164868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825798567159522,0.0,0.0,0.0844573155684699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12321495031528674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211264917886256,0.08041466849824082,0.0,0.08794090214320976,0.0,0.056789503805105675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905046325951009,0.0,0.08756003302114057,0.09199445214720006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664635178344097,0.08390500123885844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543024868099318,0.07100903860212109,0.2580735818423897,0.0,0.09381459879539453,0.059318724773557076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880004437737048,0.08761282801431647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06736055003783291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610996069146331,0.0,0.06653305885924643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379832574033065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768953417366824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06101218435965295,0.08510964446175917,0.08540605920050097,0.17860135796720222,0.0,0.10183416109112388,0.053968686264595334
mentalhealth,phauuyap,2020/02/07,"Parents Can someone tell me if the problem is me or my parents? I don’t want to come off as “THAT UNGRATEFUL B*TCH” but everytime I try to reach out to them, I feel like they don’t care at all. We don’t live together so we communicate through texting and everytime I try to start a casual conversation, they just literally answer my question/s and sometimes they even ignore it. Please don’t tell me they’re busy because I just text them once or twice a week and I don’t even care how long they take. I just realized they don’t even ask me how my day was. Btw I come from an Asian household so I guess it’s given that we NEVER talk about these kind of things. But out of all the people in the world, I never expected my own parents to make me feel even more down.",1.6732075471698131,3.633040345911951,3.2383396226415084,90.7250566037736,79.50314465408805,6.7557232704402495,23.17861635220126,7.793537801064563,1.0104646540880506,601,20,133,10,15,198,93,159,0.048,0.8270000000000001,0.125,0.8964,3,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,3,0,7,0,12,7,0,0,6,0,9,0,0,3,4,34,22,13,0,4,8,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,1,4,1,0,2,8,2,0,1,2,2,29,5,17,20,4,15,0,0,0,0,18,7,0,4,7,93,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13214037103167625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616382348611333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28822538768886063,0.0,0.0,0.2435158614934604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115712612062132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734334599948835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429385874074812,0.10097832998982764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15570966373056935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719115664914387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905500787055248,0.0,0.12481199671216076,0.12508765319788562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435022470006504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21803105101457265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15052994930806754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4708473716997773,0.0,0.0,0.09799221735400332,0.0,0.0,0.1551565678943137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524999629716092,0.0,0.0,0.1583409965384126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976286027934427,0.0,0.13979580408262768,0.0,0.10004613901070598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627535835569236,0.11360937003701085,0.2470870283482808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390467071421396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19193067888198986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337012685915142,0.0,0.11338004303536675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pkoduri,2020/02/07,"Why is it so hard to stay committed to using a mental health app? There are thousands of mental health apps in Apple and Google App Stores. I have used some of them but always stop using them within a few days of downloading. I find the non-stop reminders and notifications stress-inducing. It is hard work to develop the discipline to track and log data into these apps and when you are depressed it becomes even harder to do so. The other challenge is one of managing expectations and staying committed to the app when the changes are hard to observe. I am sure gamifying tracking can increase engagement but that will only take you so far. This is where I think some kind of support network within the app can come in very handy. This support network can be one’s therapist, family, friends or just folks going through similar issues. What are your thoughts?",5.811751054852322,7.741533867088608,5.8260126582278495,76.74425105485233,67.92405063291139,8.810970464135021,32.154008438818565,9.2995712137729,3.1029223628691978,693,30,116,14,12,218,101,158,0.076,0.772,0.152,0.9245,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,3,2,2,9,8,0,0,8,0,16,2,0,3,3,25,26,13,0,1,4,0,3,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,9,7,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,1,0,3,1,3,9,7,18,23,4,16,0,1,0,0,6,7,0,3,4,83,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124140397232074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492073584128108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14291790810397134,0.11637670511868264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712833670007986,0.0,0.11636144972392523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923228940559386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736027576771553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347897122695105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437794073626287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678045505198047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3630692461564202,0.0,0.0,0.2872100085366493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410093213526318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14068588163728513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722980896733029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18309454066283432,0.10274965345794716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879972925239885,0.0,0.2258993330936538,0.15475661706902166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30661980459385885,0.12733017051240406,0.0,0.1015784020382991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15686153667583005,0.0,0.08656663805993092,0.0,0.10725432548709674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500491223316096,0.0,0.11147166576120172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190675507005964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09835442398391313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway13747748,2020/02/07,"Is weed making me go crazy?? I think I’m definitely planning to stop smoking, but I’m very very worried that something bad is going on with my mental health. I’ve been smoking since I was 14, & I’m 18 now. I didn’t smoke daily until last year. I went through some shit, it fucked with my head & I use weed to cope. Every single day for about a year I’ve been smoking 3/4 times a day. Recently I’ve been noticing that I’m extremely paranoid though, it’s gotten worse over time and until I was around people and speaking my thoughts out loud I never realized how absolutely fucking insane I sound. The reason I’m even writing this is because I just got high, I was sitting in my living room eating, someone turned their lights on outside of their house but I was convinced it was someone looking at me with a fucking flashlight outside of my window. Seriously convinced for a minute or two. At night I’m always paranoid somethings in my house watching me but this has gone on since I’ve been a kid cuz my house is just creepy but obviously those fears went away as I got older, but now when I get high they come back. I get paranoid about the people I’m with, the shit they say, I wonder if they’re being honest or if they actually like me or not. One of the most memorable times is when I was sitting in my car in a parking lot next to a dollar general and I was paranoid that these two men wearing black that just pulled up were going to rob the store. Like seriously weird shit. It all goes away when I’m sober but i don’t know. I feel like it’s developing into some sort of schizophrenia or something but I just wanted to hear some thoughts on this",3.472695752009184,4.9483753522388065,4.369925373134333,86.68129448909302,73.08955223880595,6.586681974741678,26.91446613088405,7.010146845296331,1.2053972445464982,1313,47,265,12,26,424,172,335,0.191,0.7440000000000001,0.065,-0.9931,0,0,4,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,5,1,16,17,6,1,12,0,21,10,5,5,3,55,56,25,0,3,18,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,2,2,14,11,1,1,9,0,2,9,4,11,0,3,21,10,37,6,38,34,7,53,0,0,3,3,11,20,6,13,25,164,51,0,0.0,0.0,0.09136551936035647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779043740656078,0.20288757273964173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334703463112332,0.0,0.0,0.17592951245219893,0.07199265347980599,0.07817384122722552,0.0570735712496036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065055210552226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207621138909388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580282321306348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061839123206501326,0.0,0.07888398542555143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535533616469098,0.04734014417334535,0.06688646903267056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596673244618114,0.09783149400486853,0.0,0.15962952597447344,0.0,0.14976261063455784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608733871100923,0.09952011330398944,0.105523363207943,0.0,0.0,0.19784212511094498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3240956746724873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05145442870519596,0.07631772708668139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722287680782072,0.0,0.08267351771251026,0.0,0.07862230191808171,0.0,0.0,0.07959751985508462,0.0,0.0,0.0624961155850185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943530376076327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221018184453995,0.0,0.0995723666450064,0.08786170579211698,0.0,0.0,0.10659387880146022,0.0,0.0,0.06344343473595218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298170293002774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626317309207773,0.0924444295279162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445519306301637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883173855324878,0.15489687260524973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15865809716095278,0.21623372299854954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827557033726189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05999179256993365,0.09198711904192478,0.14865725159374846,0.16378230852996165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018382573155272,0.1829180934671488,0.0,0.0,0.08086284665333658,0.0,0.15450259360057966,0.055223070226812006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17358457323131296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153345771674496,0.0,0.09508179878346204,0.09541294394008602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205842134688664
mentalhealth,Scoutjpeg,2020/02/07,"I’m sick of needing help Just for context, 
In 7th grade I was diagnosed with depression and generalized anxiety. I had it for a long time, ( started having depressive episodes in 5th grade) but I didn’t believe that I had depression because I was really young. In 7th grade I had asked my Mom to let me go to a therapist because I was very, very close to killing myself. ( I didn’t tell her that I wanted to kill myself, I just told her I felt needed help with my anxiety (((it was effecting school))) ). I was extremely suicidal from 6-8th grade, and 7th grade was just too close for me.

Today, I am not suicidal. I’m rarely depressed, and only get extreme anxiety from conflict. I went through withdrawals, because I didn’t know how to spend the extra time that I spent trying not to kill myself. It’s very hard to admit, or believe that myself. Mostly because (again), I was sooooo young. I’m still young,,, 16 as of last month. 
When I have depressive thoughts, I can’t take them seriously due to not believe they’re bad enough compared to when I was suicidal. But now, I’m really self conscious about my appearance. I’ll pick at the skin on my arms, avoid events because I’ll start crying from being self conscious about my body, I’ve avoided taking pictures for as long as I can remember??? I’ve looked it up, and seems like I have mild BDD ( Body Dysmorphic Disorder ), but I don’t want to self-diagnose. I’ve been so upset with my shape lately that I’ll only eat one meal a day. I don’t feel hunger, so it’s easy for me to skip out on meals. I can tell it’s affecting my performance in school though. 

I want to ask my Mom if I can go back to therapy to get help for it, but I feel so overdramatic. I feel like this situation isn’t bad because the time I was suicidal was /really bad/. I don’t want my Mom spend money on therapy even though we can afford it easily, but I can’t stop sobbing over my appearance. I’m so tired of needing help. I don’t know if this is enough to get help. I only asked my mom to get me a councilor when I was super close to killing myself, so I feel like getting one now is unnecessary. I don’t talk to anyone about my problems. I never show signs of something being wrong, and because I never show signs of something being wrong, nobody ever believes the severity of what’s going on with me. Because of all that, I never talk about my problems. Most of my friends have never been able to understand them either. 

I don’t know what to do. I can’t take myself seriously. I don’t want to spend money on therapy when I can try to work this out myself, but it’s hard dealing with these feelings.",4.379505806103161,5.0274374933837445,5.539732109100728,82.26564461247638,70.09640831758034,8.919060221442075,29.29197947610045,9.081645337920577,2.290898741560896,2050,75,419,38,35,683,208,529,0.22399999999999998,0.67,0.106,-0.9976,1,2,2,0,0,4,78.0,1,0,2,4,27,27,4,3,8,0,47,11,4,4,6,79,95,29,8,12,16,4,9,3,1,0,3,0,0,2,21,16,4,4,17,2,6,6,21,22,0,2,24,10,75,5,66,67,7,56,0,6,1,0,27,18,1,8,35,270,96,8,0.055689097389424784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278060212254422,0.0,0.0,0.03893911173069454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15618536575066266,0.0,0.0,0.04282147840963255,0.13949421055505326,0.2715804550486321,0.0,0.0,0.2509701701051445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371606598262365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611718585237255,0.03591486077209915,0.0574130141084364,0.23982468989738895,0.11304652320795056,0.0,0.0,0.06382453028541556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05698384942778605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508344847471648,0.0,0.036782123609328865,0.050373976849729586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14079040455123829,0.07956860460442572,0.053470266710521186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04302525850029065,0.0,0.14547627451621412,0.0,0.0949481922064892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977298561488453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866361405216964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464469409407277,0.0,0.09181581458853587,0.04539404709719782,0.06281972750161678,0.0,0.0,0.056945875132471124,0.0,0.08162064005853055,0.0,0.0,0.09856619751188933,0.0467648161495411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608895912073513,0.0444505062312587,0.0,0.0,0.12387828024080295,0.17180346012271694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754727472724854,0.12706220403448465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657389044959398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070275853655058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308489140147927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127206793142256,0.0,0.05069726272710773,0.1742876217540571,0.06291282877868913,0.0,0.0,0.06259687874742803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574437578702979,0.0,0.0,0.07883405952489217,0.0,0.044473385111734334,0.04655857901027273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24365933535109355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561381192949414,0.08952157403220526,0.09734945142936824,0.0,0.19105600865330852,0.06465933430592848,0.0,0.0,0.10942851087223728,0.044210922794661295,0.09741828158289503,0.06400642525197535,0.05278675276993106,0.05321331905943474,0.0,0.07561848319812027,0.0,0.0,0.05797431436389445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378480127410901,0.16423436247521853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05162435120518896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04054232615345004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177457154873733,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WhatImJustAWriter,2020/02/07,"Why can’t I trust people? This began in my early teens and I refused to see what was so wrong with it, but I saw everyone as suspicious/lying to me. Every ‘you’re going great’ to ‘you’re pretty’ I’ve gotten (which is-low already) this the age of maybe what 12 I began deflecting them, now I’m just numb towards compliments because I feel like their lying-in my head I know they’re lying. What I ask dear Reddit if this is normal and how I can try and stop it, it’s something where I lose faith in myself so early on in my own mind.

Is this normal?",1.0991927899686544,2.9360631982758685,3.2727272727272734,90.38136363636364,80.8103448275862,5.597492163009405,18.304075235109718,6.574015621080383,-0.0035241379310346765,425,9,91,4,11,145,79,116,0.154,0.713,0.133,-0.3518,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,1,6,9,0,0,1,0,5,2,1,1,0,15,15,9,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,5,3,16,6,11,10,1,14,1,1,2,0,4,6,0,1,8,56,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24070572258275744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20391688900419436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296662248498514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18377923232310825,0.2084272317838746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029026116401816,0.1558281299469678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396513513454707,0.0,0.0,0.2404829442012773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238585848447744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987547733613906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656457421137136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440254330348813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21913529881110705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22024348492897425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42743124076400707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122000909669836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22191095330363564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17381692287440362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679228358821783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18236178292249214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14809216379715015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19682336287070848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23848481262014615,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cnamme,2020/02/07,"Mental illnesses where you can’t enforce your boundaries? Short post. I just have always sucked at enforcing my boundaries, like BIG time. With friends and boyfriends, you name it. It has gotten me into a lot of trouble. But for some reason, I just don’t do it. Even if I really don’t want to do what someone is asking me to do, I end up doing it. 

Please, help. What’s wrong with me? Is my self esteem/need to be liked/fear of upsetting people that bad? Or do I have a mental illness?",0.6762925170068002,3.0756936020408148,2.2847959183673474,93.22746598639458,87.46938775510205,4.899319727891157,19.391156462585034,6.42735559955562,0.13342585034013602,375,11,78,4,12,122,69,98,0.207,0.679,0.113,-0.9018,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,3,0,0,4,7,1,1,2,0,14,2,0,1,0,14,18,4,0,2,5,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,13,2,11,16,2,9,0,0,0,0,8,6,1,4,3,57,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19303613679434287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168814374158484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19370383871089786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054762748529712,0.0,0.0,0.15322869337836428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26105577931701196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792366371308106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554995152159576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333969513478938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972315151174517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4675872463656554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608342158370954,0.0,0.0,0.2546578249077401,0.0,0.0,0.22218444724433645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14862017606870334,0.2385266716039668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24201851273411776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19656628086953926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527654680534948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368350399623138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536471069929018,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,swils217,2020/02/07,"I’m obsessed with myself Was unsure if I should talk about this here, talking about it usually makes me look like a bad person, and it’s very different than the other posts here, but I’m gonna give it a shot. 

Basically I’m a 19yo female, and I’m completely obsessed with myself. It’s hard to know if this is normal or not though. I would definitely say I’m an attractive person. Any guy I have ever wanted, I got, and I feel like I know exactly how to make people fall in love with me. Somehow I know exactly what to say and how to act to just bring people in. This doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings though, the things I feel for these guys is always real. But despite this, I always have the thought in my mind “I can completely destroy this guys life if I wanted to”. Just a thought, I won’t actually do it, but somehow it’s nice to know that I can. 

I look at myself all the time, and it makes me genuinely happy. I stay up at night just looking at pictures of myself and looking at my body in the mirror. It even helps me through tough times, if I’m sad I’ll just think “at least I’m attractive” and feel mostly better. 

I’ve told my psychiatrist about this (I’m bipolar) but he wasn’t at all concerned about it. This lead me to believe that he’s not concerned because thoughts like these are completely normal for someone like me. And I also honestly just get treated way better than most people. At the jobs I’ve had, the guys working would always help me, and my managers were super nice to me even though I was not always the best at my jobs. Also for some reason sooo many guys try to cheat on their gfs/wives with me, despite them talking about how much they love them all the time.  My pictures aren’t super revealing and hoe-ish either. Also, guys just never seem to leave me alone. If I stop talking to someone, they always come back trying to talk to me again after a year or two. 

I also think I’m just amazing at sex. I have had a lot of practice, but every guy I’ve been with has said it was the best. This has actually caused some trouble for me because I actually have a real stalker now. And another guy that is also completely obsessed with me and keeps texting me from different numbers. Then there’s a guy who told me he would die for me and that he’s gonna think of me when he dies. 

But despite me loving myself, I’m actually very insecure when it comes to what other people think of me. I’m not sure why, but if I get the vibe that someone doesn’t like me that much I get offended. Because how could they not like me?? But usually it was just me over thinking and they actually do like me. 

It’s all just very confusing, I’m not sure if it’s normal to think like this. But honestly it’s not so bad.",3.2914877180800275,4.3464626405693965,4.663326968145125,86.04306961201289,72.95017793594306,7.475809391545871,25.98489714434511,7.8500785054351265,1.3549950872320111,2132,69,450,28,41,710,208,562,0.122,0.722,0.156,0.9818,5,1,0,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,7,8,41,41,3,5,20,0,34,7,1,10,10,120,91,48,2,17,35,0,5,8,0,7,2,3,0,11,38,22,0,2,21,0,0,6,14,13,0,1,16,12,65,28,57,67,15,42,0,1,4,4,40,16,0,18,25,307,103,5,0.0,0.0,0.2515191496786494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053388625383068926,0.0,0.20611629688517089,0.21446210844537847,0.0,0.0,0.03505469882092644,0.05405302151786631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039637559361824906,0.08608156867159211,0.09427033005661076,0.0,0.0,0.058077426241735175,0.10819379014098568,0.09118079134101033,0.0,0.057258682926447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052954435390188834,0.0,0.08880881290320253,0.21619018471091794,0.0,0.0,0.04115722535339896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069982599693824,0.10771427181078652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06809450127209024,0.046628504475529714,0.04343177399176831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042577365422249,0.0368262073786322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807957783948411,0.04944994943643992,0.0,0.0,0.04122798703949892,0.0,0.0,0.4593694348123555,0.0,0.05487426031733205,0.04617726648978657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910364960520864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230772179521493,0.04581861145738662,0.0,0.0,0.11331867203939534,0.0,0.0,0.0545823424178679,0.0,0.0,0.03641017927879183,0.20147166550528012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315078741002016,0.0,0.0,0.043824630233902234,0.1395734070030134,0.0,0.1032269282342606,0.05226201531030805,0.0,0.05615135020771475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520492176383516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578805187412928,0.0,0.03975732565815181,0.0,0.0,0.04837470784353172,0.15151954449275304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294875813985278,0.09002019831058998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04936914487732103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734679327046856,0.0,0.05300036952888737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490343596531156,0.08198675815329591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04692775297491205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103044770148947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494376568383744,0.0,0.04309679412905952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716756698376074,0.0,0.0,0.20716336968338614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034246485140843386,0.1981809079905668,0.15193820682982445,0.12277108183543554,0.09017490900782077,0.0,0.0,0.09851346433586028,0.0,0.06999599798829954,0.0,0.05035532403448429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354662182623065,0.1275985554647608,0.06080919700706621,0.0409167428929842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046514438570900214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03752786964058564,0.0,0.0,0.10985557310839512,0.0,0.0,0.03319549765457567
mentalhealth,glitchedeuphoria,2020/02/07,"Not sure what to do I have bipolar 1 with psychotic features as well as PTSD. Recently I went to my disability coordinater at my University, whom has diagnostic notes from a previous psychiatrist of mine, and she asked me the other day how I feel my OCD contributes to my stress.  I was really thrown off because I was never told I was diagnosed with OCD but she told me it was one of the ones listed. Do I bring this up with my new psychiatrist and my therapist? Do I question it? I agree that I do have irrational fears, some compulsive behaviors, and intrusive thoughts but I always that that to be just who I am.",4.456489262371616,6.024422193277314,6.126330532212888,74.69007469654531,70.76470588235293,11.003174603174603,30.869281045751638,10.980518767755715,3.8058395891690022,487,21,94,17,9,167,77,119,0.092,0.866,0.042,-0.6947,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,3,0,13,2,0,1,2,17,20,8,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,2,1,2,8,1,23,2,15,11,1,9,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,2,4,77,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17831112835448296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20033748326595932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13063262507142764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382029510450305,0.0,0.0,0.21750555030491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24114215786999466,0.10835430776844727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16527799828721804,0.2069680517148932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904245254553889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505001199957249,0.0,0.2400601458635632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372832658751646,0.0,0.21159107863862944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454749164592388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20197109216553008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488137395378297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17012679061790714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40953730967142543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926775043548788,0.19865419297086107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MemeManGuyThing,2020/02/07,"I need some help with communication So I definitely have something wrong with me, most likely depression. I am in a lot of mental and a little physical pain. I feel like I'm alone, and I want to tell people but I cant. For some reason whenever someone asks if I'm fine, I always give the basic ""I'm fine"" answer. I want to tell people but I just cant. Please help",-0.0914473684210506,2.2008411710526343,2.900315789473684,87.8052105263158,91.23684210526315,5.67157894736842,16.810526315789474,7.1686216300943375,0.28177263157894705,283,7,60,5,10,100,50,76,0.142,0.638,0.21899999999999997,0.5652,0,1,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,1,0,18,13,6,0,4,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,10,4,7,13,4,2,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,5,2,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21418748200662627,0.0,0.0,0.17207822327006375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19333464205480536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17812073629703554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456675888105504,0.14774144443105466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19838608091424925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772338976740484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20206883217460672,0.2072728149145316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17581810979999074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20841067355193146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533431948224566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22005496843773606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867449231204507,0.0,0.0,0.2270096510407741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21262985539262744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17522509996597646,0.1592084967883214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615131530896718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439577474852696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261086666660304,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sleepyburrito2015,2020/02/07,"I'm having a really bad day I need to see a doctor. 

My anxiety has been getting very difficult to handle. 

I just want to vomit out all my thoughts here. Its hard to even collect them. 

I am currently on my living room couch because my boyfriend sometimes really makes me feel like I'm not enough. I know that he's joking sometimes but it really hurts me sometimes and he does know that because I tell him that and I just honestly think he doesn't take me seriously because of how ""cute"" he finds me. Its very annoying and I just want him to take my feelings seriously. 
I decided to draw how I was feeling and the first word that came to my mind was broken. I'm feeling very broken as of late and it feels harder and harder to pick up the pieces. 
I need help. I'm tired of feeling like a burden. I'm tired of feeling like I'm not enough.",1.9634883720930207,3.940739476744192,3.6955232558139532,87.71444767441862,78.65116279069767,6.858139534883722,24.12209302325581,7.865858978985527,1.2896674418604652,658,23,137,11,16,220,89,172,0.184,0.657,0.159,-0.8972,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,1,7,13,1,0,5,0,7,4,0,4,1,38,34,10,0,4,6,0,8,3,0,0,4,0,2,0,8,8,0,0,13,1,0,1,3,7,0,1,5,9,23,6,16,29,4,9,0,1,1,0,9,4,0,0,7,80,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935566949688474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752747527520143,0.21361012411046576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335940482947168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07532970039457275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955508665442828,0.10221703047617024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413820214697701,0.0,0.07714874265973487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4134215829153505,0.2503370060530217,0.0,0.0,0.10675785008469887,0.0993544559108364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102590369688082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463452944358974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829207323126168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504239810512902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838618250213152,0.0,0.13176136980159892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17119538345527616,0.0,0.10314114450618428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796838778585302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793996937216893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732191732581081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22448523441865711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307863325347758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34657003196968345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756459696561042,0.0,0.10209290600184197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748440651595044,0.0,0.09273029316256397,0.0,0.26850082299662537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891296047523739,0.13778948383798814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,robloxabuser,2020/02/07,"What is it called when a person can't tell the difference between dreams and reality? I haven't found a lot online about this so I'm not even sure if it's a thing. But I was wondering if there is a name for the situation where one finds it difficult to distinguish reality from dreams. (I don't mean depersonalization.) I mean the very literal event where one dreams something, and actually thinks it happened, until they find out otherwise. Or where they can't tell if it's something that actually happened or never happened at all, but still seems like a memory.",6.197343124165556,7.211732392523363,7.0237650200267066,71.93121495327107,66.19626168224299,10.974098798397863,32.10814419225634,10.914260884657429,3.6464723631508686,454,18,84,13,7,151,69,107,0.033,0.877,0.09,0.6777,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,0,9,3,0,0,8,0,7,0,0,0,3,25,17,12,0,3,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,3,0,0,9,3,0,0,6,1,0,2,2,0,6,2,8,15,2,10,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,8,6,61,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.3140725366616531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643189456619007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168128821530583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628719907887683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29415885402646885,0.0,0.0,0.17644222832903464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4269073181507408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861816527133246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680978966617668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505815962570988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411265838299625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21808928161901694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405105340404228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649698080139048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808826206939495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24777061911832204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285121975905598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15166670352347614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28130514252495353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069091605318365,0.10311206351821073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327771730316283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745126106893416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amandeep47,2020/02/07,"I feel like I’ve transformed into a whole another person I’m tired of living like this. I’ve been faking my feelings to such an extent where it has started to become suffocating. I’m tired of putting on a brave face and exuding fake confidence. I’m tired of pretending that everything is okay with me. I may portray a bubbly and happy personality on the outside but I’m broken on the inside. Being a single child I don’t have any one to lean on, I have to figure out all the stuff on my own which is hard especially when you have a conservative family background. I’m frustrated with myself and I am completely opposite than what I portray in front of others. I’m sorry I just needed to vent. I can’t do anything but hope that it gets better and I allow myself to be vulnerable.",3.879807692307693,5.404964032051282,5.96974358974359,75.4169230769231,72.14102564102564,8.78974358974359,27.102564102564106,9.2995712137729,2.474625641025641,623,22,114,14,12,218,98,156,0.151,0.705,0.14400000000000002,-0.2617,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,4,10,1,0,9,1,14,4,1,1,1,20,26,7,0,2,3,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,3,9,8,0,1,3,1,0,2,2,3,0,1,1,3,15,7,21,22,5,13,0,0,0,0,4,9,0,2,4,83,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11532830964860084,0.17783189736987792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13955968606826094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18730093279280227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14999025653449602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17781388375846574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15241826713932374,0.0,0.15987615293103072,0.0,0.1715015237276283,0.12115648944646215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886047697116658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805337343773518,0.15192103391517084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16844302586345822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16570807485401615,0.0,0.14975275748739475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12575024724266626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491986260000064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961622166097332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048670419340442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18984425080452352,0.120038021884804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941421545193506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5847628338412802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18934330331287416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,evaldjn,2020/02/07,"Stressful stuff Basically, I’ve been trying to gain weight for a few months now, but this past month has been even more stressful than usual due to exams and some other stuff. I managed to get up to 39/40kg before this month and I hopped onto the scales last night to see that I weigh only 35kg. (I’m 5’1 btw)

I’ve googled how to gain weight and asked people and all I’m told to eat little and often or to eat a load of crap.

But like I literally struggle to eat like a banana, I’ll get half way through before feeling put off and full. I have to physically force myself to eat. 
I’ve thrown up a lot recently as well which hasn’t helped one bit (I’m blaming it on stress) I’ve had migraines which has further put me off eating, I’m constantly tired, cold and don’t have the motivation to even get up to eat but to just sleep instead. 
It also probably doesn’t help that I eat a lot of vegan things (I’m not vegan but my dad is, so most things in the house is vegan friendly) but the issue with vegan food is that they have barely any calories and fill you up quickly. 

But I know need to gain weight cause I’m scared of having to go to the doctors who might simply chuck me into one of those hideous eating clinic things. I’ll genuinely much rather end it all than end up in those sort of places with staff that abuse patients

So, does anyone have tips on how to gain weight? I don’t want to gain too much weight though, I’ll be happy if I stay at 39kg or 40kg as it means I won’t be constantly told off for my low weight (they think I’m 40kg currently so if I’m actually 40 I’ll look heavier to them I think) by my parents (who by the way want me to also exercise and get out more?) 

Like it worries me because my last period was 4 months late. So, now I’m a little concern it might stop completely. I just need to know a very quick way to gain weight but not too much weight.",2.129249999999999,3.4406660249999987,3.622,91.3585,76.25,6.8000000000000025,21.25,7.413659706084162,0.4656500000000001,1470,35,337,18,32,486,190,400,0.096,0.775,0.129,0.9181,2,0,0,0,1,0,33.0,0,1,3,7,23,13,1,5,13,0,23,25,2,4,2,54,52,31,0,7,16,2,9,3,1,3,5,0,0,0,24,13,18,1,7,1,0,4,7,7,1,3,6,12,25,6,55,41,14,53,0,1,2,0,14,22,1,12,26,201,49,5,0.0,0.06893048064053592,0.05677256479517798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304858763403197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03956249778057023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040678857918514326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05438783800259943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03546428723379267,0.0,0.09900904150960786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06351444555316209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059764020318584125,0.0,0.0,0.0609976978157697,0.12573779235193688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059546839613009,0.050911268519055634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.476238478279551,0.0,0.0,0.10305548029593023,0.0,0.0,0.07685099704345166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02941614540485473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703481132582508,0.0,0.04494756813009244,0.0,0.12158076419385867,0.0,0.03306344913652255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06193072184431071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798991507818401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712868931662624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072189232483648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394534629947309,0.09484438191524824,0.06562642689929886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526733848276055,0.11661769624006316,0.0,0.0,0.048854204094056664,0.0,0.0,0.098920367008148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337203692198277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343365228046005,0.0,0.0,0.18574597591162426,0.0,0.12830082991359468,0.0862753281063891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05459537055137869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884476626613107,0.04424638976940428,0.0,0.0,0.06459890689479611,0.0,0.05553672983216814,0.04033275221913411,0.0,0.06078280206056205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272487214459797,0.0,0.0,0.11696832940358845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057442976322686225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05824553630491895,0.0,0.04635970414009668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05821922488387345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062009165134385875,0.0,0.04863875256183268,0.19992539247929006,0.06081945151704665,0.13319797334565567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159510597393694,0.0745552141486157,0.0571588134417742,0.0,0.0,0.06686614468004637,0.0,0.11118163456640856,0.0,0.03949850673667424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407397759911455,0.0480022910591472,0.06862885155339453,0.1385350841119338,0.0,0.5667533499731426,0.052308298590765516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059081780742532335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,starsinthenight88,2020/02/07,"Feeling burnt out Hi all! 

Counselling intern/grad student who is feeling completely overwhelmed right now. 

Things I am stressed over: 

\-working part time and down $1,000 a month

\-concerned bulimia is coming back (relapsed a bit when stressed)/ managing weight and trying to lose weight

\-stressed about finishing my thesis (i know it will come together, but still stressful)

\-ongoing issues with co-dependent parent

\-feeling lonely

\-no time to do anything!

​

Just needed to vent, really. Sorry!",8.603492063492062,11.912614604938273,6.404338624338624,69.75666666666667,63.444444444444436,9.566843033509699,38.73192239858906,9.957137785484203,4.872088536155203,417,22,52,10,7,120,72,81,0.11800000000000001,0.836,0.046,-0.7795,1,2,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,6,7,0,5,2,0,5,2,0,0,1,14,12,4,0,1,2,1,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,6,2,0,4,0,0,2,1,7,0,0,0,5,3,0,8,11,3,14,0,3,0,0,3,4,0,0,8,32,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503407337627508,0.16860223126566104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11418335185172487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669385220129576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148427009665055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390498938537717,0.14548173491436395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104757402935172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482392875516986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625599204944157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15523109392248935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075273246623499,0.0,0.0,0.10288490273134986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540707499652021,0.15025789279611398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08888985775792467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849581420637205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553246033817918,0.0,0.0,0.1108097374082094,0.0,0.6357724743244937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218250272871473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161818042766307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420537974947098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33793185470560555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101512407240693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860223126566104,0.0
mentalhealth,Sippinonjoy,2020/02/07,"I feel like I don’t have a grip I don’t know what to call this, but I’m a much different person than I was 5 years ago. I used to feel present, in control, like I have a solid grip on life. Now I’m the complete opposite. I feel like I’ve lost my grip on my own head. 

I will frequently do things and wonder “why did I do that?” only to snap out of the trance I was in and realize I was in a sort of auto pilot mode while my thoughts were somewhere else. I frequently get lost in my own head when walking, having a conversation, driving, hell even when playing video games or watching movies. I eventually snap back into the moment only to fall back into a trance minutes later. This is even effecting my work. On top of this I get very angry when things don’t go my way, even if it’s minuscule or don’t even matter. Even playing video games can throw me into rage to the point where I slam things, hit myself, throw shit. I’ve never been like this. I’ve always been pretty calm and collected. 

Yes I have a bit of stress in my life but I feel like this goes beyond that. I’m not me. I’m not who I used to be. I need to find myself again but I have no clue how to get a grip. I feel inferior to everybody. I can’t even be the master of my own mind anymore. I don’t know what to do anymore.",1.750039382999674,2.9276143501805088,3.676411224154908,91.13031752543488,76.9783393501805,6.7692156219232045,21.61617984903184,7.348242739294969,0.5002722021660649,993,25,232,12,22,337,132,277,0.14300000000000002,0.733,0.124,-0.905,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,7,16,15,3,1,13,1,26,5,3,5,1,36,49,14,0,2,8,0,9,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,14,7,0,1,12,6,0,6,10,7,0,0,10,10,35,8,29,35,5,39,1,3,1,0,6,16,2,5,21,150,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641991501223236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050711135379363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157454158033704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727808119386228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875097538428148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106848856106367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404549073415768,0.0,0.12199717352086376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364370685153698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086514286345852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43105772767200384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27499224219382634,0.23312045723018626,0.0,0.0,0.09941574047340604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048681851322858,0.0,0.061817698325718276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232631368575813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195566170532372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15365792000671785,0.2657027999710267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23747522028897897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982882642580964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996001834522114,0.08065314335191072,0.08389175893483865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16545218639913845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497561331052376,0.0,0.0,0.10282480479527836,0.0,0.0,0.11066034293922784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165301063261482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12459808764359127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167900754068017,0.0,0.0,0.08635290755441705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18788836324581212,0.0,0.08974838454950683,0.0,0.08633824016966267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814991332997823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795871636124207,0.07918739354593735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004567437218114
mentalhealth,JojoV76,2020/02/07,"I think I have a mental illness but I also don't Here's why I think that I am not mentally ""healthy"":

1. Doctors started me on antidepressants when I was 6 years old. At that time, they diagnosed me with OCD, but I've never felt like that label fit me. I read quite a bit about it and did not relate. 
2. However, in reading about some other mental illnesses, there are symptoms and things that I relate to. But obviously I can't diagnose myself. 
3. I have seriously contemplated and even attempted (or almost attempted?) suicide before. 
4. There was a brief period in my life where I was afraid of my cat because I was convinced she was a spy that was keeping tabs on me. Logically, I knew this sounded crazy, but I was convinced nonetheless. 

Here's why I question having a mental illness: 

1. When I turned 17, I stopped taking the antidepressants I'd been on my whole childhood and after the rollercoaster of withdrawal and learning what unmedicated emotions felt like, I don't feel like I was any worse off and maybe even started to function better.
2. I am very successful at life. I am in the top 2% of educated people in the world, have and maintain a career, and people seem to view me as pretty high functioning and ""normal."" 
3. The cat thing only happened once a long time ago and I know it was absurd and I feel like it may have just been a strange blip in my brain caused by a period of really high stress. 
4. I don't trust the psychiatry industry and have a lot of issues with putting human beings in clinical boxes. Especially because I work in a field where we put everything in clinical boxes and I see how black and white and inaccurate and unproductive that is. 
5. The symptoms/things I relate to when reading about mental illnesses also just sound like normal things that I've seen everyone experience so I don't know where it crosses the line from normal to abnormal.",3.6638382963988896,5.861425587257621,5.218551765927977,77.74131795360113,74.29085872576177,8.390616343490306,27.90174861495845,9.103633062298675,2.6062942520775625,1491,60,269,35,32,502,185,361,0.149,0.7759999999999999,0.075,-0.9781,1,0,0,0,0,1,45.0,1,0,1,7,21,13,0,2,19,0,30,13,1,2,2,54,48,29,1,3,9,0,4,5,0,1,12,2,0,1,17,19,0,2,13,3,0,4,8,3,0,0,16,11,41,10,33,30,4,43,0,0,5,0,5,22,0,7,22,185,58,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847321689539867,0.0,0.08864629430274472,0.0,0.0,0.14158888819399598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020091456906345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079296124251692,0.0,0.07532935461435937,0.0,0.0,0.0782943116684677,0.09664778325814373,0.0,0.0,0.09882461978863842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094088804650287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17970464676719308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906104115135273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958016370485584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169415625176308,0.0,0.0,0.08459066615693246,0.07956172345521273,0.08659570089007859,0.0,0.0,0.0895231067710045,0.12648640204435,0.1699982470772002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828350806025478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18706577683050132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239844947592342,0.0,0.07868623627633684,0.0,0.0,0.09730347034747493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505747679670992,0.21624737430224755,0.0,0.0,0.07834298306758415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526188811974563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889365595190145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4460684059699497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827693421836045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602109120990749,0.0,0.0,0.09289345221203224,0.09427761228480364,0.0,0.0673282345637328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227459693847622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006306520896169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798675009770853,0.09916970774956503,0.09415860894847658,0.2656507467974678,0.0,0.05671220979547159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054399355330067,0.08059101184102346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531873089174553,0.0,0.0,0.0740119444419594,0.1014065689143886,0.0,0.0,0.09683339555311016,0.0,0.0,0.09201271397845552,0.0665607546972684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17643880526143926,0.11344814734734257,0.0,0.0,0.1032407860866134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09629118523221764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304346250327645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597624191232865,0.09883644407599183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444819525430283,0.0,0.09021585503000573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700802989605722
mentalhealth,introvertllama,2020/02/07,"My brain is currently kicking my butt Sorry to anyone who reads this as my mind is jumping all over the place and I just need to feel like maybe someone cares.
I’m currently going through a panic attack and I just feel like I’m worthless. I currently live with my boyfriend and he pays for basically everything because I was the idiot that racked up a ton of debt from going to a private college and having a bad habit of shopping to forget how I’m feeling. My job barely pays me anything because I’m a server and it’s been slow and my hours keep getting cut. I’ve been trying to find a new job that pays well and can give me enough hours to live off of but it’s hard because I never finished college. I just feel so stuck in my life and I just wish it would all end. I’ve been having thought of how great it would be if I just die and briefly think about taking my own life but I’m to chicken to. It doesn’t help that I feel like I have no one to talk to because I have no friends, I don’t want my boyfriend to worry because I did seriously consider killing myself 3 years ago and ended up in a mental hospital, and I can’t afford to get help. My life is spiraling out of control and I just can’t stop it.",3.6331227022058816,4.123079761718753,4.802472426470589,87.45263786764706,71.6953125,7.429779411764708,28.730698529411764,7.285733465282438,1.4394759191176472,953,35,208,9,17,315,135,256,0.174,0.7020000000000001,0.124,-0.8951,7,0,0,0,0,2,11.0,0,0,0,1,11,15,4,1,9,0,20,5,2,3,3,46,44,19,2,6,9,0,6,3,1,2,3,0,0,0,11,14,0,3,8,2,5,3,7,8,1,1,7,6,28,7,30,34,5,25,0,1,0,1,7,8,1,1,17,132,39,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767128302063602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704306889029927,0.0,0.0906718721049468,0.0,0.0,0.12534996943550408,0.0,0.0,0.09199886348990416,0.3358350829282866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300155123816288,0.0,0.0,0.11233971875926134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235804912414852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143533797593192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19518026990498666,0.1138493105632618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990260870732739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785611780759716,0.2361459679065365,0.0,0.0,0.10070598924768052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512772396006843,0.0,0.11513296674019287,0.10569833282527136,0.1252399757475318,0.0,0.0,0.12147801906872438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870303484682598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14770774568335188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21701767950898826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186808227742532,0.09793641648996003,0.12190204016475475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23347821129225846,0.16149070472870616,0.0,0.1945886130414304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069442823074384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11103934628837564,0.0,0.11125421950743954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169988523459101,0.08498053259001613,0.10641619239171192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466338867292037,0.0,0.0,0.12927693885540564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511861065219245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021360875980682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335836894500063,0.0,0.0,0.12334173366073475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211858336499612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284449863664534,0.08856155788852398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060132454171658,0.0,0.08747362277110779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480756174800403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498925496730612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906846106484483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670592244424647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11189698867717664,0.0,0.15654280825297764,0.0,0.0,0.07095474918338884
mentalhealth,youngdumbpotatogum,2020/02/07,I feel like my life has no purpose I lost my grandma going on two years ago and since she’s died I just feel like there’s no point anymore. My grandma was my non romantic soulmate. She was my best friend. I’ve been trying to go back to a “normal” life without her but I can’t. To make matters worse I just got a letter saying that I have two weeks to come up with the mortgage payment or the house (the house her and my grandpa basically built) will be foreclosed on. Honestly if it wasn’t for my dog and my cats I think I wouldn’t be here. It feels like every day is such an uphill battle and I don’t know how much more I can take. I don’t want to alarm anyone. I just needed a space that I could say all this.,0.9831818181818192,2.623453681818184,2.6454545454545446,95.68818181818185,80.36363636363637,5.1792207792207785,20.090909090909093,5.773587663045528,-0.2401506493506491,553,14,130,3,14,182,99,154,0.11599999999999999,0.738,0.146,0.3716,1,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,2,8,9,1,1,7,0,16,2,0,2,1,27,30,8,1,6,7,1,3,3,1,2,2,2,0,0,5,6,0,0,5,0,0,3,8,3,0,2,6,5,25,6,11,19,4,13,0,1,0,0,9,5,0,2,8,87,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494572488926854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15097462761416522,0.10644513369296772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705808868389833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15975956246145998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311355954315775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154598348054176,0.0,0.0,0.09817794979223647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579942358482049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826320624886667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309213451830777,0.3262667166161078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176151481038483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17303550019706734,0.0,0.1217549576923821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3513138113786526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366349602937825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150539066296954,0.2231206505999287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618074046772102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161697738509264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119090660512008,0.11287913801667328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14915641092388365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14390977027864024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421242216052523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592904257494725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446057199072646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975450165471002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033564865237846,0.0,0.2974198251071994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897912042347564,0.0,0.12211245183221862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14674756625529295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155138841443916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803331917801904
mentalhealth,uwuplskillme69,2020/02/07,"Undeserving of Happiness I feel as though I’m in a constant battle with my own brain in an attempt to convince myself that I deserve to be happy. I was sexually assaulted by multiple family members as a child, and kept it to myself until I met my ex, who proceeded to cheat on me and completely betray my trust. These experiences have traumatized me greatly and have given me trust issues that I’m not sure I will ever get over. However, the past 6 months of my life have been the best it’s ever been in so long. I have so many good friends that are supportive of me and encourage me to get out and socialize. I also have gotten into a very happy and healthy romantic relationship with someone who is extremely understanding and loving. Although I am happy about my current situation, I have a constant nagging voice in my head that tells me I don’t deserve to feel this happy. That all of these amazing people that I’ve met will abandon me and hurt me. I have no reason to believe that these people would do any of these things, but my brain tells me otherwise. I’ve started seeing a therapist but the thoughts persist. Does anyone else experience this? If so, how do you cope with it and look past your intrusive thoughts? Some days it is overwhelmingly exhausting to battle my own mind into accepting things for how they are and not questioning everything. I just want to be able to enjoy my life and these great experiences I’ve been having.",7.570048484848485,7.3448623927272765,8.080000000000002,69.7866666666667,63.25454545454545,11.55151515151515,36.15151515151515,11.072351349416056,4.128042424242423,1158,49,203,29,15,385,149,275,0.10099999999999999,0.7190000000000001,0.18100000000000002,0.9712,2,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,1,3,11,29,5,1,9,0,25,7,3,3,4,43,45,25,0,3,6,1,2,0,1,3,3,1,0,1,22,17,0,2,8,0,0,0,4,9,0,0,11,5,35,20,33,29,5,22,0,3,2,1,17,9,0,3,13,157,57,0,0.09678965660460798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740265341756522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582028554988349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767757836955159,0.09917244126385667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904879824416873,0.10157477315926404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216098534064116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148211344965287,0.20919046726824628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624213213014636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470128074867818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085533831568299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510357142257002,0.0,0.0,0.08698830232313584,0.2840365699148187,0.091244674187982,0.0,0.09787951716614417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477944859559588,0.0,0.10113720146030536,0.0,0.0,0.08118257180579129,0.0,0.21342187620816988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5151719462597826,0.0,0.0,0.09933411149293424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361532924652556,0.0,0.0,0.10102325475296138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367307937400897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08565580030220954,0.08127893444994587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735644400615296,0.0,0.0,0.0981295200597575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772996154110998,0.0,0.07725658047461048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847933584140528,0.13420352187064774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842656675068532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09951588728408066,0.0,0.10391586867554893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712882491478774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087956293512198,0.0,0.09866486589952482,0.0820095619467768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850821711837009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983575530558536,0.09122310589130797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16919685209846494,0.0,0.0,0.11238025138008093,0.1286054940916809,0.0,0.09509534618609894,0.15368035166900382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076144599597174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986160333166277,0.057089047198928974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06875659502099975,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ugosquishnow,2020/02/07,"Suicidal thoughts overwhelm me when I leave my comfort zone... is this common? First, I want to say that I am not having any of those thoughts at the moment but I’m more so wondering if other people have felt this way.

My whole life, I’ve dealt with depression and anxiety, the latter which makes it really difficult to push myself to better myself. Over the years, I’ve become more of an introvert to cope. I’ve settled for a serving job despite wanting to get out of the industry. I stopped going out. I never dated because I felt like the stresses of relationships would be more overwhelming than the good feelings. If my anxiety got to be too much, I’d drink to numb my thoughts. I wasn’t happy... but I felt okay.

Things have changed this past year where I took small steps to get out of my comfort zone. I started dating someone. I started a job search for something outside of the service industry... but the truth is, I’m miserable being outside of my comfort zone even trying to do something different because my mind always goes toward the worst case scenario, and to a point where my suicidal thoughts are way more frequent. The job search has been discouraging... having a partner who has never given me a reason to worry still makes me think I’m just going to get hurt... and my mind spirals downward. To a point where I almost think it’d be safer to just not try because I have less suicidal thoughts that way. But that’s counterproductive of course. 

Does anyone struggle with this as well? And how to you keep making an effort when it causes your brain to think of the worst case scenarios? Sorry for the long post.",5.620735090152564,6.7734180453074435,5.767341655108647,79.921359223301,67.57605177993527,8.34526121128063,31.54276467868701,8.563005593585519,2.502542487286177,1292,52,232,19,21,409,165,309,0.185,0.723,0.092,-0.9886,4,0,3,0,0,0,40.0,0,2,0,3,14,22,0,5,20,1,20,4,1,6,3,50,52,15,3,5,10,0,4,1,1,1,2,1,0,1,15,9,1,3,14,1,0,5,5,12,1,1,13,5,29,10,38,33,9,40,0,6,0,0,6,13,0,4,19,158,44,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986993416309855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467775510074386,0.0,0.0,0.061031905184924774,0.0,0.13731437076350309,0.0,0.0,0.06275408123329082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641291478542669,0.0991199195244336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937505668268467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001887573976478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219620160952262,0.09494177566412676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730005848955246,0.0,0.0,0.0937678463278464,0.0,0.0,0.07853932100882796,0.0,0.0,0.08791914281820931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059277889769972864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045379424909232254,0.0,0.258517257706684,0.0,0.0,0.07633983759934979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406693097415068,0.0,0.10201202684315157,0.07527659571401192,0.07177989486698734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553870851633174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607738552708094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671839462173789,0.0797723912693489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503046550865704,0.0,0.0,0.06339186141239272,0.04384647422511419,0.0,0.0,0.07942439992335397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17972301313179342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18124034852394916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597530932673085,0.0,0.1384388062992561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567488453831426,0.062220154120152166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16968225978989288,0.0,0.0859540395598766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574950436524345,0.09227617513923747,0.0,0.09635606091998217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137143119661056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604342289277345,0.13818521492352254,0.0,0.10046584702670464,0.12704858317236528,0.0,0.07167308903508529,0.07503357728147979,0.10280634677088406,0.0938243843696468,0.0,0.2945101411716149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059624766560115325,0.17252121388534167,0.0,0.3562505302692788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971363674878407,0.12186637615599348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058717168008061,0.2137140118199902,0.0,0.0,0.08069447833357504,0.0,0.0,0.10020074490298386,0.0,0.0,0.0973281767660096,0.0,0.0911437306217215,0.0,0.06375460016774957,0.0,0.0,0.11558989428321732
mentalhealth,UpbeatCommission6,2020/02/07,"Lithium turned my life around. No diagnosis, should I get evaluated for Bipolarism or Depression or related? Is this a safe dosage to stay on in the long run? TL;DR: 5 to 10 mg of elemental Lithium per day (120-240 mg Orotate) makes me a completely different person, and I have no fucking clue what it means. Is there some kind of tell between Bipolar-II and ADHD+Depression?

All my siblings are diagnosed with depression on the scale of 6-8+ continuous years with long histories of self-harming.

I read Bipolarism is treated with significantly higher Lithium dosages, and I'm responding to \~1/10th the bipolar dosage. I'm reading up on Bipolarism because I had a weird response to magic mushrooms. For somewhere up to a week, it was like my critical thinking took a vacation and I lost filters and inhibitions while still being conscious of the fact. People thought I was on drugs, and I thought I'd lost my mind. It was also the most stressful point in my life, and I had a bad trip with career, family, hobbies, friends, etc, all imploding in a few short shitacular months while experiencing alcohol withdrawal, so I don't know.

The second thing that makes me suspect Bipolarism is that I always suspected undiagnosed ADHD. I read Bipolar-II and ADHD are hard to distinguish. The ADHD symptoms have been there since gradeschool, but the hyperactivity spikes late at night or if I miss a night of sleep as in Bipolar-II. My siblings were supposed to be on ADHD medication since gradeschool, but haven't been re-evaluated or medicated since, and it was never determined if it was ADHD for certain.

I have no idea, other than the fact I don't like having to take pills in the morning to function.",6.983225806451613,8.085814580645161,7.507903225806456,68.84185483870971,64.48387096774194,10.716129032258065,38.403225806451616,10.686352973137794,4.498438709677419,1360,71,225,35,20,448,174,310,0.109,0.847,0.044000000000000004,-0.9053,1,0,2,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,0,2,6,16,1,1,18,0,26,16,1,2,6,45,43,22,0,3,8,0,1,2,1,1,14,0,0,1,11,14,1,1,10,3,0,3,7,9,0,1,15,2,22,7,39,25,6,34,0,5,0,1,4,16,1,8,16,151,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6276978066725317,0.0,0.0,0.0930291916404427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06961326631477499,0.07243196241757435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749230197182115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726825007930785,0.0530644243968458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126949888456568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056139574957940905,0.0,0.22492621492859227,0.08835317229320297,0.0,0.09094795514451404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094951187677104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970829416681018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206230049745845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725404672982323,0.08047564342857272,0.045479648492189585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797904383156809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826802528040818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064841470447962,0.047839999883111,0.0,0.0981953632868924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12297094140572995,0.0850557483666238,0.0,0.0,0.15407172169345154,0.0,0.0,0.1900491129789608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162121215809072,0.0,0.0,0.09482216969290674,0.0,0.17538595425204218,0.0,0.0,0.08789494338123187,0.0,0.06948189336784986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713776010991586,0.0,0.0,0.16337967792460795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06034900029823812,0.07600806114563488,0.0,0.0,0.08228969287741876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26121846734460297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081136884432607,0.0,0.0,0.21602415633995087,0.0,0.08711213161925653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927829349422188,0.06951765601868028,0.0,0.09971463972840576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047751761072248,0.06545021437706068,0.0,0.07608489505657658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783166412558509,0.05577765455286119,0.0,0.13821478690619238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967149371290574,0.0,0.09468460423464134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982567019824729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05605687307604933
mentalhealth,480taquito,2020/02/07,"Do you ever feel like you just kind of fuzz traumas out of your head to attempt to have a happy day to day life? I sit and contemplate here in my dark room by candlelight. It's peaceful, and my mind wanders to something I haven't entertained much in years that happened to me before I was able to form memories. I try to recollect the version(s) of the story I was told yet it feels greyed out, outside of the traumatic point of the story. I consider this coping, even after tries at therapy, with situations like these. You just kind of... try not to listen too intently/think too intently about it so as not to fully process or recollect what it really is.",6.810435267857143,6.422099976562502,7.3976785714285755,74.59375000000001,64.859375,11.376785714285715,34.691964285714285,10.914260884657429,3.7719026785714287,519,21,98,13,7,172,86,128,0.069,0.841,0.09,0.4102,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,4,0,1,10,7,0,0,5,0,6,2,1,1,1,18,11,5,0,0,5,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,8,5,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,5,13,6,25,8,2,14,0,0,1,0,6,7,0,2,8,73,21,0,0.1929880087235831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642185811852851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489226002541872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746675964866794,0.17456870266249438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951610717029926,0.13787067199295522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17065865876157812,0.20543932388369465,0.0,0.0,0.19806137399226093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4019346265814085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631313789493607,0.18856838572297588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948628741136917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186839189671732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824360474808701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363306012871746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21692660768590152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857159765645478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22069860704715175,0.0,0.0,0.12365892347581875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844083126548063,0.0,0.3930785695731411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427795025757833
mentalhealth,isomerism97,2020/02/07,Been feeling pretty weighed down as of late Ever since about 2 months ago I've been feeling kind of weighed down (like the kind of heaviness you can feel in your chest). Some days I wake up and my thoughts are so loud it's as if they're shouting and it takes me a lot of effort and time before I can quieten them down. Does anyone have any tips and ideas on how to get better?,6.0925949367088625,4.731940000000002,5.70490506329114,89.33811708860762,66.72151898734178,8.40632911392405,29.87658227848101,5.985473137389443,1.170870886075949,296,8,68,1,4,91,62,79,0.0,0.882,0.11800000000000001,0.7964,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,1,2,4,4,0,0,2,0,6,4,2,1,1,14,12,9,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,7,4,14,9,2,12,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,3,7,41,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20045557996285568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537799738772215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811928111213847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19242475413715884,0.0,0.0,0.1999985762558376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14583876503917284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19789280207584864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20455261181420584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430228872567845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181465263227544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552795859332703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4709708922151409,0.0,0.0,0.2550908254125937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047843976877546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19225241463279152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18049929179090424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300612194063564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870617189558381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002584083422034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795264200668866,0.13186149663265995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,purplevortexxx,2020/02/07,"Losing weight when starting Abilify? I was terrified of gaining weight when I was prescribed Abilify 4 days ago. I’m already obese and I’ve been slowly and steadily losing weight, so I have been monitoring my weight for the past 4 days. I’ve actually been losing weight (not huge amounts, but between 1/2 lb- 1 lb) and I’m confused. All I’ve read about Abilify says it makes you gain weight. 

Has anyone else had this? I’m not doing anything different. Feel free to share your experiences.",3.698611111111109,6.294154923913041,4.429275362318844,81.51379227053141,75.84782608695653,7.567149758454105,28.700483091787444,8.515128840125781,2.425351207729469,391,17,70,8,9,125,62,92,0.11199999999999999,0.725,0.163,0.7851,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,0,5,4,6,0,1,1,0,9,7,0,1,1,10,15,7,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,7,0,1,1,1,0,2,4,0,0,6,8,6,3,5,9,2,8,0,3,0,0,4,1,0,1,7,33,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.11051110004043443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003851465769516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496903066250226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918376337553419,0.11603321678460525,0.09319125223059267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14606773039465165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831726016759465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460193658049508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077565659595273,0.0,0.0,0.057260238274737536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38007765037096336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559213289550099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810547539192028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132759694350533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900572266947245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015562294441299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8274137743701125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dreamytunes,2020/02/07,"I feel like I have every mental illness I have gone to my doctor and been prescribed anxiety and depression medication but never have taken it, I have also had my therapist tell me I meet the criteria for ADHD. So I thought I had all of these things co morbid. but then I started thinking well I meet the criteria for OCD and for other disorders so do I have those. then I was convinced I have pmdd but then I was like no it’s bi polar disorder and my depression was really bad for a couple weeks and I started to randomly feel better (like I could take on the world) and I am freaking out because I was like oh I must be manic now, and I don’t know what to do because I feel like everything is falling apart I don’t know what’s wrong with me. If I feel like I have a purpose in this world that is great does that mean I have grandiosity ? does the motivation I get euphoria ? do I just have a personality disorder. I sound crazy but i’m just scared I don’t want any of these things but i fit a lot of the bi polar symptoms and I don’t know for sure also i’m 18 and my “depression and anxiety didn’t get bad until this last year.",0.9377215189873382,3.0841995316455737,3.3924320675105517,87.62545822784813,83.21940928270044,6.9987510548523195,22.560168776371302,8.109356740369918,1.336300725738398,887,31,190,19,25,307,114,237,0.207,0.616,0.177,-0.8355,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,8,19,0,1,9,0,30,6,0,1,4,39,50,24,0,4,8,0,4,6,0,1,4,1,0,1,14,12,0,0,11,0,0,2,7,8,1,0,11,5,36,11,16,36,2,20,0,3,0,2,4,7,0,3,17,136,50,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403654419443356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783798805297472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758437479493283,0.0,0.17063921721683642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18624461247727486,0.1359744512129024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863860179793606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904707017860489,0.12340504822848868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881800658910815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3834667179385901,0.11415496361825105,0.19520008260126465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396824478370493,0.0,0.1002353426579378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255702589963659,0.23902966086994265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653891124556835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296144608593115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838807582689429,0.09091126445412012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32692549211958993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948182218427273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148810274832735,0.0,0.11235403545284753,0.11239530160868727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860182710956904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738308216388344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144852492967847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11166028492905868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15788202400445878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10511504458806613,0.11592164566054335,0.08385615299557116,0.0,0.09748152334169316,0.0,0.0,0.12949411247530052,0.14819022125627254,0.07146347156287036,0.0,0.08854180561032747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578287028459329,0.0,0.08946207646364436,0.0,0.10027823409887453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193978049753824,0.0,0.07182121204428074
mentalhealth,generativeart,2020/02/07,"Does any high school student here have a story with the suicide hotline/ chatline that they would like to share? **Read all of the description for info** 

Hi everyone! I am writing a feature article on the need for more crisis workers/ volunteers especially on the Suicide Prevention Hotline and hotlines/ chat lines related to. 

The audience is directed towards students who are in high school or in a school system. Therefore, to receive the peer to peer connection, I’d like to interview students who are in high school right now. 

This is an important story to me and to a lot of people. Your vulnerability would be much appreciated and your privacy of course will be respected. Language will be used carefully.

Through this interview, I’d like to have a raw and honest conversation with a high school student about their experience dealing with their health and the Suicide Prevention hotline.  

If you would like to be interviewed, I will need to obtain your permission to put you in the newspaper. Your answers will remain anonymous regardless. I can place your first name only or even a fake one to protect your identity. 

Please PM me if you are interested and I can send you questions, my contact, and more details. Thank you so much!",6.209454638124362,8.701031362385322,6.400305810397555,70.74680937818553,67.94495412844037,10.165545361875637,36.881753312945975,10.380263240014207,4.6118126401631,999,54,155,29,18,319,123,218,0.096,0.7559999999999999,0.14800000000000002,0.7745,0,0,0,0,0,3,27.0,0,11,3,3,5,11,0,0,16,0,21,1,0,2,1,31,26,12,3,8,4,0,0,4,0,7,1,0,0,0,5,10,0,3,3,2,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,21,10,29,15,6,19,0,0,0,0,30,13,0,6,6,115,26,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394580880647343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086599786905152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210446721165028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515766544583566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182065659101093,0.0,0.0,0.10390415612833867,0.0,0.10636697444412144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249278747459287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11558378435664615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4595521601876512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21249626666998533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244545916212453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987040203448946,0.1612562217950754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368392213306786,0.08270041736019812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538548250357642,0.0,0.1136084350594119,0.11936205803015135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093120784544874,0.1218118412508573,0.0,0.10876777909770123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286195928738708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5502450922708009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568263275520845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100111665942593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09391502400619887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317338182506245,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mowgli1703,2020/02/07,"I'm scared that there's something wrong with me mentally. I'm always afraid. I get really good reviews from my manager but I always have this feeling that sooner or later, I'm gonna be discovered. My colleagues really like me but I have this feeling that I'm gonna be fired. I find myself accepting lunch, dinner and hangout invites because I want to maintain a good relationship with them even though I gained 30 pounds in the last year and have been trying to lose weight.

I work really hard and was privately expressing my dissatisfaction with one of the teams I work with. Coincidentally, that other teams manager's kids show up in the cafeteria and I'm freaking out if he heard what I said, and he's gonna let my manager know and have me fired tomorrow.

I make a lot of money for my age but I'm scared to spend because I have this feeling that I'm gonna lose my job and will need it.

The weekend's coming up and my target is to lose weight but I will go out and drink with friends because I'm scared that they won't invite me again if I refuse their invite. The handful of times I make up my mind not to go out and drink, I lie that that I'm sick.

I have this terrible feeling that I'm a loser who constantly needs to improve. I don't think I'm ugly; at least no one has said that I am before. However, I have this entire plan for getting fit, being more financially secure, having these hobbies, being and doing more interesting things, etc., before I can approach a woman and ask her out. I'm completely ignoring the fact that there are countless people out there without any of this and still happily dating, being married and having kids. Me? I'm completely ineligible.

This constant feeling of insecurity and needing to be better is screwing me up.",4.808879310344828,5.863955290229889,6.001781609195403,77.85887931034483,69.37356321839081,8.90344827586207,29.44252873563219,9.188382445141503,2.4986528735632185,1403,52,265,27,24,470,171,348,0.18899999999999997,0.6609999999999999,0.15,-0.9537,2,0,3,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,3,11,7,22,1,5,10,0,29,10,1,2,1,55,68,23,0,6,9,0,11,1,1,7,1,3,0,3,24,26,7,3,9,7,2,4,5,14,0,2,5,14,39,8,33,49,5,29,0,4,0,1,20,13,1,4,13,173,63,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16737135477018786,0.0,0.0,0.06839381179325757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940231725717484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183927046257524,0.0,0.17116224027100208,0.0,0.0,0.08894958581721651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663564999249554,0.2108999834829752,0.2173696654118112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19704858593922506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216666599746032,0.0664282201931067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.254266341278735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09192287169276626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770327172729527,0.0,0.10509159393923567,0.0,0.11431711566956958,0.16871350498076762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009460584907958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980423887256153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527287488416265,0.08198128493223053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10284379370171913,0.0,0.049135407077069364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3375499525445733,0.0,0.08550447195219693,0.0,0.0,0.13426793628467865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135500041225293,0.0,0.10155113336813544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22372318043356132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363031761745208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697253919527371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932909606554951,0.0,0.0,0.10797890506175332,0.0,0.0,0.1913379306237873,0.0,0.3020765475878829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742682743930386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031857677151193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681693861552149,0.06444379868238112,0.09881350643089452,0.0,0.05864554503482895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828318704360323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05932118824706097,0.0,0.0,0.2449442282831432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09694980791068017,0.0,0.14643823165115333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099619497052246,0.0,0.06476639923704726
mentalhealth,Moist_Remorse,2020/02/07,"I've finally scheduled to meet a therapist and a psychiatrist I've suffered through depression since I was 13. My mom is bipolar and used to beat my sister and I when we were young. My parents divorces when I was 8 and my dad remarried when I was 10. My stepmom was always verbally abusive and denied any sort of relationship between my dad and me. When I was 15 and my sister was in college, my mom got bad again. She would have mental breaks every day. During these she would either verbally, physically, and one time tried to sexually assault me. 

I moved out when I was 17 but was broken. I dropped out of college after 1 year since I was so depressed I couldn't get myself to go. I couldn't make any friends without the friendship revolving around alcohol and weed. At 22 I thought I fell in love. She instantly moved in with me when we started dating. 4 months in she proposed to me. After 2 1/2 years she developed feelings for someone else and madeout with him. I broke up with her and kicked her out. It's been one month since then. I tried to be supportive to her as a friend but all her friends somehow turned me into the bad guy. I cut all contact with her today.

During this month I tried everything to desperately get better. I rearranged my whole room and cleaned it. I got a new job. I had tinder hook ups. I hung out with my family more. I restored connections with friends I neglected. I started going to a kickboxing class. I started to volunteer at an animal shelter. No matter what I would do, at the end of the day I was miserable. 

I was at the brink of suicide when I reached out to my sister. She took me in for a weekend and took care of me. During this time I realized how depressed I have been my whole life. How my relationship was just a bandaid barely holding my bleeding heart shut. That It's ok if I am bipolar like my mom, as long as I get it treated. My sister found a list of therapists and got me in touch with a psychiatrist. I start therapy next week and have an appointment to get me on medication the week after. Even though I still find no joy in life and have insomnia, there's now a hint of hope that things can maybe get better. It will be over a month until the medication kicks in, but maybe I'll be happy with myself some day.",3.4585299901671576,5.075903535398234,4.709321533923305,83.66190757128813,73.38053097345133,8.031071779744346,28.705998033431662,8.680891452615391,2.191811012782694,1786,73,357,34,36,590,221,452,0.16,0.735,0.105,-0.9789,2,0,1,0,1,1,44.0,2,0,0,3,19,26,2,1,20,1,33,12,1,4,2,64,59,36,1,7,7,10,2,1,4,4,10,0,2,1,12,33,1,2,6,1,0,7,5,11,0,2,23,2,76,15,62,27,7,77,0,7,0,1,35,26,0,5,43,253,88,4,0.0,0.09226910622460452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832246605268038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06479821416476997,0.0,0.0,0.10591530122247336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932523449168275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004469560742538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13774816651429111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939872285637045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15066874125011326,0.0,0.20122079479483607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505454543083272,0.0,0.06897410963982868,0.0,0.0,0.051435683777163635,0.0,0.06561302164459662,0.0,0.06998900237529294,0.0,0.07341359180402142,0.0,0.0393759251329348,0.0,0.0,0.08530822404624509,0.07117631251497164,0.0,0.0,0.08538588597612172,0.2406640371455216,0.0,0.20343229044007802,0.0,0.08851628110469212,0.0,0.18685118456122649,0.0,0.0,0.07710846460760835,0.0,0.08289935452820185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228221538743693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734741746199472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077278892244087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001078986807214,0.03804577713103639,0.0,0.0,0.06891689860252062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028520161632902,0.0,0.05198214773837749,0.0,0.1564717506133627,0.0,0.0,0.1569016804984278,0.0784796542084672,0.0,0.0,0.2736186739098055,0.2486362349851917,0.16553753940562746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521213209769735,0.08282091495045485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554019130958438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647093922574656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672171495552746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932569418260512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598321007079959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22048122069624226,0.0,0.0621910523003901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518257846927367,0.08837159403822689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890568160156131,0.1808376866939864,0.05173667028253082,0.0,0.07651176344808397,0.06182402812071585,0.09081904349031143,0.0,0.07381636666592215,0.0,0.17304391596879776,0.15861598003958666,0.08470560590270754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725897124856099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493320850870154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388924771329553,0.0,0.07506869290572947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16596043480763256,0.0,0.0,0.10029785596718388
mentalhealth,Liuhi,2020/02/07,"Help Since this Tuesday I've been feeling ""not real"". I have pretty much all the symptoms of brain fog plus I have been feeling less emotions and also feel like I can't associate emotions with memories. This feeling is less severe when I'm socializing, but it is still present. I also did some googling and I think I might be experiencing depersonalization and derealization. I haven't made any changes in my life to trigger this. How can I fix this?",4.117857142857143,6.720717690476192,4.940714285714286,78.34178571428573,74.47619047619048,7.057142857142857,30.73809523809524,8.07648339933343,2.3572666666666664,362,17,65,6,8,117,60,84,0.046,0.857,0.09699999999999999,0.2222,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,12,3,1,3,1,19,19,9,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,5,9,1,5,13,5,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,5,47,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31214166482993344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271672613267188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21786512868683466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064553220350369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4390615461332377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3947187091399759,0.1394236391572496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081285031534345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378485610864875,0.09534620448085082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18466682754055944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070358438453624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346638914357274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985497271190823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221368710737142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22047729959848747,0.0,0.16143986956578718,0.0,0.0,0.1989428924093632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15585647703001074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028478512198212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505181033822374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xxdark0nexx,2020/02/07,"So sick of this I have conversion disorder, causing me to have seizures due to stress. This past week has been a living hell for me, I’ve been having partial seizures multiple times a night and barely getting any sleep. I’m exhausted and I’m at the point now where Im scared to sleep. I’m so done with this, I want to give up.",1.2281722689075636,3.3758246323529413,2.427983193277313,94.9573529411765,82.08823529411767,6.238655462184874,22.94957983193277,7.447530270364453,0.8149638655462184,257,9,58,4,7,82,47,68,0.263,0.718,0.019,-0.9566,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,2,3,0,7,4,2,1,0,5,13,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,3,0,4,0,9,10,0,10,1,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,6,32,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16323509231853944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465866899541987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27510606475484023,0.0,0.0,0.2456437499592645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541073226353455,0.2302677624657181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592838525946176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21195927754332855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252608114267228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291448652080805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22691491653174825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403214162212396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4804257102947717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749644379481405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996896366543932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415815171879199,0.0,0.19254520913586465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lonely-boi-sad-time,2020/02/07,"It turns out I manipulated a lot of people who I genuinely care about, and some who genuinely cared about me. About an hour I got back from my friend's house, I found out that she didn't actually want to be in a relationship with me. I got pissed because she led me on, even though now I realize she was justified. We got into an argument, and I started using guilt as a weapon. I let my pride get in the way, and I manipulated her. I'm hindsight, the reason she didn't want to be in a relationship with me was because I manipulated her. I wasn't completely unaware I was doing it, but I dismissed the feeling that was I was saying was immoral. I'm trying to prevent myself from overstating how bad the situation is, and how badly I fucked up, but I can feel the urge to lie about this for sympathy and attention. thanks if you read this btw",4.610860962566843,5.146969123529414,6.401978609625669,76.68981283422461,69.52941176470588,9.946524064171124,30.16042780748663,10.018931242160765,2.8215294117647063,661,25,136,16,11,230,97,170,0.195,0.6970000000000001,0.10800000000000001,-0.9448,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,1,0,1,10,11,3,1,11,0,15,2,1,8,0,32,33,12,0,3,3,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,8,11,0,1,6,1,0,1,3,6,0,0,13,3,31,5,23,17,2,14,0,0,0,1,14,8,2,3,4,104,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.15229415943616453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000217066618493,0.2606107757706736,0.19026809282824209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31823155357699834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16362820932801747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307758720069067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15781943811933788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17111410719341,0.1205732404686704,0.1442769554962924,0.08153603925290209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37445150634340896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15368979481739836,0.18007478348759326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15958413581640501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267847065720695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819385418151556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561043962381708,0.0,0.0,0.16045789629777013,0.0,0.3351047181448636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124106896371559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542041063508906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046160264385267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368107263023275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533302833664282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595596489514963,0.1697508196187365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347876020067678,0.0,0.0,0.18409901504540205,0.123874881370149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thunder9835,2020/02/07,"What is my problem Lately I've been struggling a lot with my thoughts and I can't seem to control my brain anymore. Recently I've been thinking a lot about how much I'm actually worth and Have had a lot of thoughts that aren't so healthy. I'm not very good at getting my words across so forgive me if I confuse anyone. 

So, About 4 months ago in November my grandma Grace had passed away due to heart attack, and about 2 days after that a 3 of my other family members had died in a car accident and it hit me really hard, And to top it all off the girl I'd been talking to for around a year had straight up told me she doesn't like me at all and we haven't talked since I'd gotten a new girlfriend and she got jealous. All these problems were going on while I was out of sports on injury, and I really have a problem not doing sports because it's my main outlet for getting out my anger and sadness. When I finally came back I had lost all interest in sports all together. I finally thought I got over everything, and I started talking to a new girl. We had everything in common. I had finally begun enjoying myself again, that was until she dumped me because of her personal reasons. Now I don't know what to do, I am always sad and it's really difficult for me to enjoy things that I used to. I don't even do a sport even though I used to do 2 at a time. It just makes me angry at myself and then sad again whenever I think about it. I can't talk to my parents about it either because they don't want to listen and my dad just tells me to man up whenever I have feelings. I need to start enjoying my life again and if I can't what's the point of living it",4.425262515262517,4.273249629629632,5.720594220594222,83.81871794871796,69.7977207977208,9.07887667887668,30.104599104599103,8.841846274778883,2.16823256003256,1304,47,284,21,21,440,171,351,0.17800000000000002,0.754,0.068,-0.9879,1,0,0,1,1,0,20.0,2,0,1,3,21,22,4,2,13,0,31,3,2,6,5,58,59,25,1,7,7,2,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,4,18,21,0,1,10,4,1,4,11,14,0,0,22,3,48,8,48,36,11,53,0,4,0,0,22,22,0,7,28,204,66,0,0.0,0.0,0.09588586889775788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710000172324726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175872747742474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744577189200114,0.06870444644094148,0.0,0.0,0.08747066608504851,0.0,0.1117829336954102,0.09231685150118864,0.07555452189725786,0.0,0.1796919343975472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968869245367174,0.0,0.11238125094512244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020497189351873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336843648144883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197654076061907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297972824330859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17661634183522013,0.0,0.09262912447218667,0.0,0.049682318773923935,0.0,0.0,0.3229112992363345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267175050167647,0.0,0.05584242249139255,0.08241435037927212,0.15717218212762693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802008368654166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643648819841285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05400015935526118,0.0,0.1108395752173052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940270117266646,0.04800401313859703,0.0,0.08676382661857716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726047670636557,0.2506069272142606,0.0,0.0,0.06558813858397823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842879020352468,0.0,0.07223111257436897,0.07285724037451723,0.0,0.1897968421023239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10910414810040413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579530568932371,0.0,0.0,0.0928857972310502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820595985485116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888402349109397,0.10102583621709438,0.09701815862372183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945061191499308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128023199167711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13909537684909434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272084721971904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31590500733257065,0.08588203318608119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527840899230486,0.12591982615704578,0.09653822249888687,0.23401820243804214,0.05729517026197443,0.0,0.0,0.09388995965159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16972714361355934,0.0,0.08107333892514823,0.05795525608534245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06327508541932432
mentalhealth,Lovve119,2020/02/07,"Is this normal? I’m not activity suicidal. I don’t have any plans or urges to end my own life, but if someone held a gun to my head and splattered my brains across the coffee table I wouldn’t move out of the way to avoid it. If a car was headed towards me head on I wouldn’t swerve. 
I just feel like this isn’t normal, but it’s been like this for so long that it is normal",1.9432931726907647,2.6044141927710847,3.595361445783133,93.9242871485944,75.74698795180723,6.497188755020081,19.8574297188755,6.42735559955562,-0.15110281124498035,290,5,72,2,6,97,57,83,0.073,0.818,0.109,0.4395,0,1,0,1,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,4,0,9,5,4,0,0,17,12,7,1,7,7,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,3,1,8,2,9,7,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,4,47,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017717537217766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136962528460553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954783044734675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679142961044,0.13675575079705365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5893791227533517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521081203750726,0.1870434864309043,0.0,0.0,0.16940719786355735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20345699865047231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5626745337766477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16219578870787696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093904719726382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15194613545099456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,monkey_7k,2020/02/07,Is anyone here on the Care Programme Approach in the UK? I've been referred for it and I have my meeting in under two weeks and I'm not sure what to expect,-0.14088235294117624,1.9895652058823536,1.9544117647058847,96.1898529411765,88.11764705882355,3.4000000000000004,20.264705882352946,3.1291,-0.5246823529411762,123,4,27,0,4,41,29,34,0.057,0.8490000000000001,0.094,0.3045,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,6,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,2,6,4,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3489846096025901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5088690450517864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4703989232944651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4875513701382284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4003505360160705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Soleil_Pride,2020/02/07,Any tips to help numb the pain? Everything hurts and I feel trapped. I try cutting and I don't feel a change in my mood I'm still hurting inside. I can't have alcohol because im on meds and im living in a nightmare. I just need to numb every thing so I can function again.,-0.9594999999999984,1.1276963833333329,1.495000000000001,97.7025,93.5,4.333333333333334,20.833333333333336,5.985473137389443,0.028333333333334213,213,8,50,2,8,72,43,60,0.311,0.645,0.045,-0.9337,0,1,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,1,0,3,0,4,4,0,0,0,7,8,4,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,2,7,0,5,8,0,5,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,27,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356244086616524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993290486735322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440161522420654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332369631171731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18576260122482732,0.0,0.19815181213248886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22296105544257905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14778205591171065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4720534763084538,0.0,0.4763091153077307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19468650854585529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449018519285065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16348197519176555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346046130877553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760743730231961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647608370259552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496903933062775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,litvar,2020/02/07,"(UK) Looking for some advice I'm not in a good place right now. I have a long history of self harm and suicidal tendencies which has been resurfacing/building up over the last few months. I know I need to speak to someone but seeing my GP could take 3 weeks or more due to them having so many appointments booked. I'm also not really looking to see my GP because last time we spoke they tried pinning everything on Anxiety and basically disregarded most of what I tried to say (I have a issue telling people things so when I do it's usually taken lightly as I under-explain and fail to get my situation across).

Where can I go in order to get an assessment or some help? Preferably not private as I was made redundant which means I'm currently trying to find a new job/source of income.",6.203433691756272,6.2282360387096825,7.037634408602152,75.28089605734769,66.03225806451613,10.759856630824373,33.351254480286734,10.504223727775694,3.4585555555555563,626,25,119,15,9,209,112,155,0.114,0.862,0.024,-0.9072,3,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,2,1,6,3,0,0,6,0,9,0,0,1,0,21,26,12,1,3,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,5,4,0,1,4,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,5,8,15,1,20,20,5,23,0,1,4,0,9,9,0,5,12,75,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541725025157846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718848843607106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166923781577765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695255352976467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269847498724922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293968224077505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536454512390187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618923525781198,0.0,0.09038912303960996,0.1333996722260712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660472839271556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600199736828952,0.1578279433396861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740715087841328,0.25928633371414755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075010720172135,0.2671160317622171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15049253147262634,0.0,0.16124699575900234,0.0,0.17324698397192878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694846053010772,0.0,0.0,0.11793009276332438,0.0,0.15360696534933369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026200224326764,0.0,0.1661685128934568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188850737880492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358238380018903,0.0,0.12647922554979762,0.0,0.0,0.25347706370841383,0.0,0.16591895981282084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17877360832816738,0.0,0.0,0.13475858721592365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396977075852912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958229049034468,0.0,0.1390126237045877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10566264640730637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274060764794484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239440057109792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17516595503782664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275765657424085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Raptor2312,2020/02/07,I just really wanna hug someone and cry my heart out I really got no one to share what I'm feeling,0.7690909090909095,2.356187727272733,4.2545454545454575,84.1518181818182,80.81818181818181,8.036363636363637,20.090909090909093,8.841846274778883,1.3755636363636368,78,2,17,2,2,29,19,22,0.209,0.525,0.266,0.128,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,3,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,3,2,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4367733681797572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20105159688546886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180177473853984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4711885931603035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694415931403961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5094586527900212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369071255488457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luisa13,2020/02/07,"Trying to help a friend, kinda scary the thoughts he is telling me and I want to figure this out but I need help So I have this friend who is constantly depressed, he always post something about depression and I always call him to see how he is doing, just had a 2 hour conversation on the phone and he was telling how he’s been lately. Come to find out he’s been depressed since 5th grade and people have only told him it gets better with time but it’s still the same. I’ve tried talking to him by identifying what is wrong but he doesn’t know. He just gets random episodes of depression that break him down. Right now he is kinda over weight and he is making goals to getting his weight down. But I’m scared after he reaches that goal he will still feel the same. I’m 50/50 because the way he made it seem was that nothing can really help but I want to figure this out because it would change this mans life. I’ve known him for a couple of years so it’s not just a random friend you know. Any advice on how to approach this would be useful and thank you",2.1621428571428574,4.1516830368663635,2.7797488479262675,94.45819470046082,78.07834101382487,5.445990783410139,19.60576036866361,6.2581,-0.1328154838709681,837,19,182,6,20,260,117,217,0.11900000000000001,0.738,0.142,0.1397,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,3,12,11,0,1,9,0,20,3,0,6,0,46,40,16,0,5,9,0,3,0,3,3,1,0,0,1,15,11,2,0,9,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,8,4,14,5,23,28,2,23,0,4,1,0,36,9,0,5,9,106,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409103176041308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19429799923644744,0.0,0.0,0.07939698408864815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234477635027118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325976378052384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11921927892092853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351065608901594,0.100573562777239,0.0,0.12617001022128824,0.0,0.0,0.12918650403725135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4022415158334293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05903452409937673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671139083803634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.270612439950722,0.0,0.18299803870560266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23477400545645016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497954883244815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283303109637276,0.0,0.13170402943763174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246707351932286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104758201560962,0.07793445723594827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865718955726554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202897932965723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879696939223136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809427883940806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181842497973084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07479584738862187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09970760510953952,0.0,0.0,0.11689150530600732,0.0,0.09303812697522353,0.10628880525542717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658043208792484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988322810279373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864804020933152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384275044282264,0.20409695372302966,0.10749174938007136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268993847614314,0.06808041961567404,0.0,0.0,0.11156381631387227,0.0,0.15853712413664925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083830019656788,0.0,0.0,0.13772952013871867,0.09267419472148576,0.0,0.2843507692536613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587792761046766,0.12765258935258136,0.0,0.0751859946810248
mentalhealth,bloodofgore,2020/02/07,"Putting away silverware at work was agonizingly discomforting for my hand I've had this sensation my entire life, didn't really think much of it until today.

I was putting away a mass of silverware, organizing them and whatnot. But there was something about how the silverware vibrated as I moved them around that make it extremely uncomfortable for my hand, to a point where it was difficult to get my hand to actually grab the silverware. I had to put on latex gloves to deal with the sensation, which helped a bit but not much.

I've had this sensation when rubbing my hands together, the feeling itself makes me fucking nauseous. Is this normal?",8.021501831501832,8.762708512820513,7.973015873015871,67.67,62.16239316239317,12.497680097680096,37.227106227106226,12.031772070788634,4.932192673992674,524,24,88,17,7,169,76,117,0.066,0.8640000000000001,0.07,0.1036,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,1,6,3,1,1,7,0,9,6,4,3,0,12,15,7,0,1,3,0,7,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,2,0,0,4,2,3,0,0,8,7,11,0,18,7,3,15,0,0,0,1,4,8,1,0,3,64,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.18207296206715806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16609374719307046,0.0,0.0,0.3505918608185742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20369457109501032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19235345944099572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433931240878217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17248811604132702,0.09747916950303394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505912759869844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131785376961471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490841832218182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19830261248016326,0.2743122166175465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18280657299261374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17637627348259033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5626864916018539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11952647914628127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363666118532853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195514834195294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17685388349016834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358308183345377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oneluckytrooper,2020/02/07,"This is how suicide happens I've been having a breakdown in my bed, very clearly upset, while my roommate is in the room, directly across from me, facing me, and she hasn't said a thing. I've been crying for about an hour and had a clearly upset look on my face, and she hasn't asked if I'm okay or anything. I don't really blame her. Maybe she's just that oblivious, she doesn't owe me anything, but if our positions were switched I would notice and I would ask if she was okay. All I can think is that this further proves that no one really cares about me. This is even more evidence. For whatever reason, there's something different about me that makes people not care. I genuinely have no friends, I have no intimate connection to anyone else, platonically or romantically or anything. I have a truly miserable existence and I resent the world for it. Why do I have to be this way? Why am I different in a way that no one cares for me? Anyway people wonder how suicide happens. They wonder why no one noticed, no one did anything, they wonder if there was anything they could have done. REACH OUT THEN. SHOW PEOPLE THAT YOU CARE. I'm posting this because I need at least one person to show that they give a shit. I need someone to care. I know it's begging for attention but that's what I need. I fucking hate myself.",3.570147783251233,5.270429758620693,4.5835796387520515,84.33724137931036,73.25287356321839,7.576792556102903,26.987958401751502,8.269060116576782,1.7958923918992884,1041,38,204,17,21,339,135,261,0.191,0.6809999999999999,0.129,-0.9588,3,1,1,0,0,2,32.0,1,1,4,0,10,15,4,3,9,2,29,4,3,4,4,37,55,18,2,10,11,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,17,6,0,0,8,2,1,0,11,7,0,5,9,2,37,8,20,42,3,16,0,1,1,1,18,10,2,10,3,150,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061568579528037376,0.09022052035612503,0.3622998440390766,0.0,0.16463500210004686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05367618219107245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4488785953240905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030301236522984,0.0,0.0967218888413166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18399291298192602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010860681057427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355683296131628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05815805759292478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802939080917403,0.0814034138260174,0.0,0.08446828902675098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572963700251835,0.0,0.0,0.08693393075940642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867142914495301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839152744864952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394219267583978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05877594152475739,0.0,0.08846089344570897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958701523946227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20049743983875945,0.0,0.0,0.2983343504843351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18313421686242934,0.07688432663533765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433026213426432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281778325853314,0.0905329648040378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375839633051023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038495504346054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460686919393819,0.0677873632074183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926309884784441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584983814542673,0.056420692054996474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265279867304203,0.0,0.13978446101993308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383619246875441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28646858373689404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510039486081956,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WeeBabey,2020/02/07,"Do I just have a panic disorder or is there more than that? Let me just preface I have had horrible hypochondria since I was in elementary school, which created my bad panic disorder that I have to this day.  I also have slight paranoia, but it isn't enough to affect my social life badly.  

I'm not diagnosed for really complicated reasons that have to do with my family, but that's another story.  I'm definitely not exaggerating when I say how bad my panic issues are though.  It basically consumes my life and I have to be reassured on the daily or I'll start crying badly.  I'm unable to convince myself I'm overreacting anymore.

But lately I felt like there could be a bigger issue than just a panic disorder.  I'll go from super happy to really scared and panicky for no reason.  There doesn't even have to be a blatant trigger for me to get into this mood.  My doctors keep giving me anti-depressants, but they just make me feel shaky and more uneasy.  I also can't focus very well and I'm always feeling restless, which gives me bad insomnia on the daily.  At one point my past psychologist thought I had ADD/ADHD and put me on Concerta, which only made things WAAYYY worse and caused me to have a mental breakdown.  The only medication that has worked for me is Lorazepam/Ativan, but my current doctor doesn't want to prescribe it to me again in fears I'll depend too much on it(yet she gave me zoloft lol...).

I had to drop my classes last semester because I couldn't manage my mental health anymore, and everyday I just felt worse and worse.  

I'm not sure if this is just my panic disorder progressively getting worse because I'm not getting the proper treatment/help for it or it's something else I'm unaware of.",5.5156592956592965,6.434858792792793,6.648917553917552,74.352671990172,67.67867867867868,9.177668577668578,30.15137865137865,9.339509955726095,2.747481681681682,1370,50,241,26,22,461,174,333,0.276,0.643,0.081,-0.9973,1,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,3,18,22,0,9,9,1,29,9,0,9,2,50,54,22,0,4,19,0,4,1,0,0,9,1,0,0,17,10,0,1,7,0,0,2,10,14,1,1,9,5,37,7,30,39,4,22,0,0,0,0,8,10,0,6,10,167,54,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09278788223405768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348491560264227,0.0642424586545335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095833397298127,0.0,0.0,0.1531373142655515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32232334982094313,0.09412941404757118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931291804386062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061643554828112276,0.0,0.08480832978953658,0.04979216636885622,0.0,0.06649832744448192,0.07836354046740254,0.0,0.0,0.3539439175946184,0.15804939442900534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06449659144158881,0.0,0.0,0.07977553148704372,0.0,0.05099453481881037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278394469572935,0.08687940707789618,0.07807641846129416,0.0,0.1482617701197216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210125063727378,0.1481280938235465,0.04387855130282999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218835078113956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206749416716658,0.0,0.0,0.05175026470667495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16116822274522585,0.0,0.06862518217079304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293405839889214,0.08709292631969999,0.0,0.0,0.07894944954983288,0.10906725919453868,0.037719469522804513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305518673989878,0.05153631191694466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777799012034589,0.1556131139012367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05675607248670959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05231750183235623,0.1174388960719306,0.0,0.4529292472297149,0.0,0.0,0.07370287470826453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298562700669227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761441979857328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892163897265653,0.1587634325157133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061398152790983734,0.07729773570698413,0.07813766637214177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06386647767479026,0.0,0.0,0.07870287451789071,0.0,0.059437766604099475,0.0,0.0,0.054647554285455736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276674012213344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05129293985011965,0.0,0.0758555442191704,0.06129378134252943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370391008497472,0.045538724216366525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941841892542652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05620765904183197,0.0,0.3147223595438294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TryAnother1993,2020/02/07,"BPD recovery Hey,
I am write because I’ve been suffering from BPD since an early age. 
I’ve acknowledged that only in my early twenties and I am now in my late.as far as I can remember, being conscious about the illness, I’ve been suffering from it since my teenage years. 
I am now in my late twenties and I feel like I have recovered from it, almost completely, if not totally completely.when I google this illness I cannot find any testimony of people who had recover and I am wondering : have I really recovered or is it an episode ? 
The last time I felt as I am feeling right now was before it all started. 
I feel happy and all the emotions related to that disorder have disappeared. 
Is it it ?",5.328666666666667,6.268768088888887,6.6051851851851815,74.42333333333336,68.1111111111111,11.037037037037036,35.74074074074074,10.980518767755715,4.313296296296296,552,28,101,17,9,187,77,135,0.124,0.818,0.057999999999999996,-0.8343,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,5,0,17,2,0,0,3,21,23,8,0,1,3,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,10,4,0,0,9,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,5,4,17,2,11,17,3,17,0,2,0,0,3,5,0,4,12,73,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17449959952973665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185050719407252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622933701701598,0.0,0.1482852985162204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43895724529403496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827118350304579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19972092723470974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960228436426014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643383979511896,0.12449379117482708,0.16732016983371045,0.0,0.15927356930884218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18550660497238453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420479106802001,0.3931533587211268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513628350041674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253515063236854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081228363804893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163758141946137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974064352508596,0.14881997159175198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28830493208323904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334451499743815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016143763760886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889811985152402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122199011824144
mentalhealth,ThrowEwweyAccent,2020/02/07,"Is paranoia and anxiety under stress a definitive sign of BPD? I experience severe paranoia and anxiety under stress, I experience other symptoms. I am undiagnosed though, is the paranoia and anxiety a 100% sign of it?",7.140990990990992,9.76924832432433,9.311891891891893,50.26801801801803,65.75675675675676,12.500900900900902,42.06306306306306,11.855464076750405,6.7595657657657675,176,11,22,7,3,63,22,37,0.461,0.539,0.0,-0.9399,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,5,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5230609157249231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287049790766722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4458873845496811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574780242456654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5221495908531204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23688998391069074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22392441511923414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,impairedmentally,2020/02/07,"What is happening with my brain? Ive noticed that in the last year or so I've started to have these weird delusions/blackouts where i zone out for a couple of minutes or sometimes hours, while the blackouts are happening my brain goes all fuzzy and grey which feels like ive been on a intense train of thought and then when i snap out of it i cant recall any of it. This is always followed up by a semi intense headache and inability to think properly. I use nicotine and the blackouts mostly happens when im in withdrawal which is quite often. I also use SSRIs. Does anyone have any idea what could be causing this?",5.228032786885247,6.01942799180328,5.446024590163933,83.17920081967216,68.26229508196721,7.739344262295082,32.463114754098356,7.645422480735847,2.1808655737704914,493,21,94,5,8,156,83,122,0.039,0.893,0.069,0.0926,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,6,0,12,2,2,3,1,20,22,12,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,2,9,1,15,18,2,16,0,0,1,0,0,7,0,4,9,66,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962910607955914,0.14528279880192285,0.0,0.0,0.2374706092736078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12208573417232922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.389827012437125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17936428579927105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940543934795285,0.1931937225058885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152795331846438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828398563857319,0.12473565880730765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4631997492451042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17194773723873633,0.0,0.0,0.19710433445348474,0.1886000539954333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232388261045306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530168702081818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987854627313637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857106523664061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726857804293307,0.0,0.12358414980605285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187787122664383,0.0,0.1386144348939445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016000275156253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124379229934626
mentalhealth,lexijames99,2020/02/07,"Why Do I Crave Temporary Change?   I get bored with things super easily. Mainly my hair; I cannot seem to wait long enough to let it grow out, I crave it to change constantly. I get scared of large changes like going from high school to college, but my hair, With girlfriends, too. I seem to get bored easily and leave wanting more. I like the chase? I cannot stand to keep the same. Is there something to explain this?",1.7932384823848224,4.2560991097561,2.0657723577235783,96.47990514905152,82.29268292682926,5.595663956639567,18.86720867208672,6.937597516519254,0.0661826558265588,325,8,70,4,9,98,54,82,0.09,0.757,0.154,0.7461,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,2,0,5,2,2,0,0,12,15,2,0,1,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,3,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,2,10,3,12,14,4,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,4,41,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5951418093259553,0.0,0.0,0.2026520100734033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19376737819147968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939281713470419,0.0,0.10657693764372526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19813447138804768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666842123052085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19856592031727208,0.0,0.1917609016671499,0.0,0.18323419675102431,0.0,0.0,0.1659570852569501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877490417035048,0.1897891555055251,0.0,0.3414383496606632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14436883071476525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458580079914755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060934390669992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921557217464692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nya9019,2020/02/07,"Psychiatrist electronically sent my script and my pharmacy never received it. He required me to go back to his office and charged me the cost of a new appointment. Is this normal practice? I went to pick up my medications and was told my Adderall script was never sent. I called the psychiatrist office and was told by a receptionist I would need to come back in. I asked if I would be charged since I asked during my last appointment if all my scripts were sent and this seemed to be some kind of error, and she said I would need to talk to the doctor.

During the appointment, the psych looked at his computer and said the script for some reason stayed ""qeued."" I asked what he meant and he said he sent it on his end. He said he'd give my a paper script since it didn't work, and I asked if I'd be charged as another appointment since this was a computer error. He said yes, because it's more work and he needs to get paid. I commented that it seemed a little excessive for this circumstance, and he said if I didn't like it I could go somewhere else.

Is it standard practice with psychiatry to charge for these types of incidents? I used to get medications from my primary but was recommended to see a psychiatrist. He put me on a great regimen, but I feel distrustful of him now because he kept reiterating he needed to get paid even if what happened wasn't my fault.",6.624527363184079,6.4136314029850805,6.964567164179107,76.95257213930348,65.19402985074626,10.878009950248757,32.418905472636816,10.504223727775694,3.1326424875621885,1088,39,219,25,15,354,123,268,0.055999999999999994,0.895,0.049,0.4676,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,4,5,1,0,13,1,19,3,0,3,3,44,58,19,0,14,7,0,1,1,0,3,3,6,0,0,15,13,0,2,5,0,3,10,5,2,0,0,26,9,32,3,28,24,4,25,0,0,2,0,38,6,0,9,9,134,47,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974238093301983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35570017519605424,0.0,0.0,0.14628394247361542,0.0,0.11596943035003833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971289022168327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193808780765982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594616423039334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973600995212676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946116572254608,0.0,0.08424873497091367,0.0,0.0,0.06282634619306042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04809590001352576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908996907368824,0.09124847335643736,0.10811860778401236,0.0,0.0,0.10487094252195292,0.0,0.0,0.08411494891492144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990536045090636,0.0,0.0775360919430252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046471184782416484,0.0953359622917171,0.0,0.0,0.07987745787251738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916482599895704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821232691863293,0.14672594461209815,0.09186819542556683,0.0,0.0,0.09319812103749836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562260789640524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779995453896644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5428895897386067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579890785455333,0.17318868333779308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23605455667659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138604379258434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645444104359095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817838709270125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821537715053627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817787127404303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384980511425722,0.0,0.0,0.20271311599058375,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,delVi04,2020/02/07,"My GF is hallucinating, and says that she has someone else in her head. As said in the title, my GF hallucinates with pretty nasty stuff, for what she tells me she sees distorted human figures, mostly black, it worries me deeply because she is starting to hear them, hear them talk, walk, scream, sometimes she sees something so scary that makes her start screaming and crying uncontrollably, she says that she feels that ""They"" are watching her, or that she feels that they are behind her.

Sometimes she does stuff out of character, like scream at me, say horrible things and even reach the point of hurting herself or others, she says that there is someone else in her head and sometimes she loses control of her body

Look, I'm here for the long run, but I need ways to help her cope with this, her parents don't do shit, they don't care and she doesn't want to go to a doctor o someone who can help her, I'm scared that she does something stupid... I really need help here.

Sorry if I wasted your time.",6.701491477272729,6.727852567708336,5.9058143939393934,83.80926136363638,64.98958333333334,8.440151515151515,29.95454545454545,7.686295010490155,1.7132437499999995,791,24,156,7,11,239,110,192,0.177,0.733,0.09,-0.9118,1,0,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,5,2,5,11,2,2,4,0,11,5,4,2,0,21,29,11,0,4,4,1,2,1,2,0,1,10,0,1,16,8,0,1,3,0,0,3,3,9,0,0,1,17,37,2,18,28,1,14,0,2,5,0,46,6,1,4,5,101,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673975069258879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216108044132943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116250982103267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227943653773298,0.0,0.0,0.12026180857660553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206037228677113,0.19161842142805388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18291780425438486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231241317983664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107156727958292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06222164674737829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22472205225221945,0.0,0.24679033740298936,0.0,0.22015221063971435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720369308746925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053487807561118685,0.0,0.0,0.09688890826082433,0.09193804967875853,0.122483344007915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308067608312345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16236034438766664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156778769444285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034967145999058,0.0,0.0,0.11138345415302824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07013753978964374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414329524425532,0.3482607388321643,0.10961146762431914,0.0,0.1744873695667585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238260844424784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782934802758482,0.16857054790023887,0.3248441190814226,0.12255712659220484,0.154985099434607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25066342022451704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799819606234363,0.09569286740156437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273556417034277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06384035085370747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457584235089116,0.08690241833853714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118518444305732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eatsticks,2020/02/07,"i get so spacey and unfocused sometimes i get this feeling, and am currently feeling it, or more-so lack thereof where i just feel unconnected completely. its hard to talk, i can still use my hands decently but i stop feeling discomfort from things like hunger or stomach aches, and feel uncomfortably drowsy without feeling actually tired. noises are uncomfortable, and its hard to focus on any particular thought. they usually follow up things like sensory overloads or particularly difficult days , but often happen during that day and can last anyhwete from a few minutes to 6+ hours.  i feel like im on auto pilot, and i cant make it go away. i still chuckle at funny things but the feelings feel completely muted. 

i want to know why this happens but its gonna be several months before i can see a therapist or psychologist.",5.314430769230771,7.819901520000003,6.216666666666669,71.04346153846156,70.46666666666667,9.682051282051283,33.53846153846154,10.035473477838034,4.02603076923077,668,33,107,19,13,220,102,150,0.17300000000000001,0.6579999999999999,0.17,-0.1284,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,1,3,0,7,4,2,2,0,33,29,15,0,2,10,0,12,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,11,6,1,1,11,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,13,12,4,12,26,2,18,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,5,13,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.12344163347487787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602146772827529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884694874815832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763859142898943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652568360704092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631586259777221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5756406016126274,0.09036861009014546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217764764864548,0.0,0.07189046653873461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22371959995843446,0.0,0.2266307441078259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457286209081868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366371485544693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951877221684141,0.10311094339116256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853983448227316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443691501628825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096772429005926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080075873111967,0.0,0.0,0.1429042251484504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251075603315482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020393856864323,0.10575613569818826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167251591995964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14687134956381553,0.2521145251938065,0.0,0.0,0.10042351914096648,0.0,0.14538829015830385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092517390389569,0.13931722983808592,0.0,0.07461048809244106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414276576345687,0.0,0.0,0.12193741734501802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scrumpusrumpus,2020/02/07,what do you do when you're nearing crisis and don't have insurance? in the past I've been lucky and had insurance so it's never been an issue. I lost my job due to mental health a year and a half ago and am still struggling with employment. Due to messing up with insurance changes I don't have any right now. I really need to talk to someone but since I don't have a job I also can't afford to pay out of pocket.,2.059238095238093,3.1960900666666667,3.977619047619047,89.44500000000002,76.1111111111111,7.365079365079365,22.857142857142854,7.957251820313856,0.9580476190476186,326,9,74,5,7,111,60,90,0.077,0.8809999999999999,0.042,-0.4129,4,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,1,5,4,0,1,5,0,13,1,0,0,1,11,15,8,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,1,4,0,7,1,12,11,0,14,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,1,9,51,9,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046515731115976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846259771830664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699893997894884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24422895031415254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245403112301346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240967412659095,0.458204018684119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25202095127856683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326618038835253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711865506339609,0.17806052240282053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203907286619756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790069030493325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19716099408208468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19097734800081664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19561468301476687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843724027527928,0.0,0.0,0.2413545643967621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18556387894762216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867216433566627
mentalhealth,theatrekid623,2020/02/07,"need to say i just need to get this of my chest 

at six i had suicidal thoughts

that no one would care

sometimes i woudl spend like 10 minutes in the kitchen staring at knives",2.755833333333332,4.436347361111113,2.5288888888888903,98.305,75.3888888888889,5.911111111111111,28.66666666666667,6.42735559955562,0.9239000000000002,139,6,32,1,3,41,31,36,0.162,0.7,0.138,-0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,5,7,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,2,2,4,2,6,4,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35710584776661924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18299251657265272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17111571833335248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5194156991198428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373402123812397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785349092149417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3464087569207031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3831194735240744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780614244177879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488093831387587,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rharris33,2020/02/07,"Athletic mental health Athletic Mental Health

Request for SHORT Athletic Mental Health Research

Hi all,


I am looking for participants for my research project. The study is on how stigma impacts an athletes willingness to receive mental health services. If you identify or identified in the past as an athlete of any level (does not need to be professional), and are at least 18 years old, please click the link below and complete this multiple choice brief survey!!

https://csusb.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_bCUX8OLPOTGqYgB

Your time and effort is greatly appreciated!",10.96554307116105,13.387577932584277,8.624213483146068,59.65107677902622,56.19101123595507,10.877153558052433,41.799625468164784,10.864195022040775,5.399964794007492,472,24,57,11,6,139,71,89,0.0,0.902,0.098,0.8346,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,5,0,5,4,0,1,1,10,7,7,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,11,6,2,12,0,0,2,0,6,6,0,2,4,35,5,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035869407853209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971097039242507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330155711197306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16794001323735452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6476618928994422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279155217821054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6140353432990112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294783955956088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15984057057127718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541245541277467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16720826557651927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882254756042965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809298512161377
mentalhealth,ohmymy78,2020/02/07,"Am I the only one who feels this? I sometimes think that my family would be better if I was not in their lives. I dont mean it in a suicidal way, I just wonder and think that they would be better if I wasn't born. Like spending money on me, having to worry about me.....",2.4674137931034466,2.9409259137931048,4.5098275862069,88.55543103448278,74.34482758620689,7.179310344827586,19.67241379310345,7.1686216300943375,0.2376758620689654,205,3,47,2,4,71,44,58,0.16,0.742,0.098,-0.5733,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,2,2,3,0,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,0,12,14,3,1,4,4,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,5,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,11,3,5,8,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,2,38,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4220839504210554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796634819671257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22495180609191887,0.0,0.12065457168802715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657877062661914,0.0,0.2107078050506191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599295681533375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16169660186192628,0.18148296226085175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23600349172738516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610139948660034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057989857748594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894072229976991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587756346486974,0.0,0.24233246239256456,0.0,0.3390207783270645,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JubJubBird13,2020/02/07,"Podcast focuses on mental health and art therapy [It Gets Better](https://soundcloud.com/morevisions)

I have been a member of this group for a short time. I joined in order to not only see the troubles everyone goes through in their path to peace of mind, but also have found helpful messages, comments, and posts that have helped me. This exchange is what I’m trying to be apart of. I haven’t been clinically diagnosed with something, but as we know that’s usually skewed by pharmaceutical companies and the DSM-5 anyways, but I do struggle as we all do in my own way and to my own intensity. I have seen suffering all around me and within me and I only hope to promote a space of understanding and love in which healing and growth can begin. 
-
This podcast is sponsored by a organization whose focus in mental health, art therapy, and oppurtunities for those struggling with diagnosis or treatment that want to pursue expression and health in a beautiful way. They are MoreVisions. We know that there is biological elements to mental health and therefore we have clinically and licensed professionals on the show plus artists, creatives, and regular folk all the like speaking on their experience and the methods of therapy outside the clinical realm. It is more overlooked that the environment you are in molds the manifestation of certain illnesses and how they express within your mind, so we are heavy advocates of art therapy. This podcast goes into all of it.
-
The name is “It Gets Better” the only thing you can truly telling someone going through it. It gets better trust me. I am reaching out in hope to have this reach anyone who might need it. If you or anyone you know listen to podcasts and would benefit from judgement free, open, and entertaining discussions on topics too many people are afraid to address properly or cannot, we wanna try.  The link is to the SoundCloud for all the episodes. You can also search on Apple podcasts to find it. I hope all who listen, enjoy it, and I hope that all who need it are reached. Much love and strength you beautiful souls. Never forget that it gets better.",6.815195009332937,8.625322901856768,6.7574123194812845,71.48487375970136,65.3395225464191,9.617015423911976,34.38736614598684,9.906371001090498,3.6824456036938797,1702,77,274,38,27,540,192,377,0.042,0.722,0.23600000000000002,0.9982,0,0,2,0,0,0,46.0,6,7,4,5,8,22,0,3,18,0,30,12,0,2,9,72,55,33,0,10,8,0,0,1,0,2,10,3,1,0,31,32,0,0,7,6,2,2,4,5,0,0,4,5,32,18,52,48,11,32,1,1,2,2,36,22,0,9,5,209,63,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397754209151704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221366562320968,0.0,0.0,0.07779780851554341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30916607957905184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870149685715786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350723081729285,0.0,0.0854865851109084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798751157855309,0.0,0.0,0.09582131031806768,0.0,0.0,0.1826357919286592,0.0,0.04966714312893554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.371576349538309,0.0,0.0,0.11715463377119073,0.0,0.0,0.34720168590858524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14408581454877722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042695536564258126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577501957812938,0.0,0.0,0.088602227216694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26421310314683033,0.09270957862603768,0.17648292283649414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424350603963165,0.12960078822576776,0.06740244478855521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19939768817296505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06058692089201417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369780931604298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964046767878912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404733903849704,0.06727897739412546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18272312674020166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076384853023068,0.0,0.39976353027513417,0.0,0.05805966034424355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050959240216286165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866747352154525,0.0,0.0,0.0909786222064581,0.0,0.0,0.09625043664123112,0.0,0.05154633109816285,0.13873611758925747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062081088860793575,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kaygtfo,2020/02/07,"Advice on not feeling too overwhelmed? I know what steps I need to take to be happier but it all feels like too much. I struggle to get started on bettering myself because I get so overwhelmed by the amount of work to put into it, which makes me feel lazy. So then I end up procrastinating or not wanting to try bc it’s all so daunting. I just feel stuck in this cycle. It’s not that I’m unmotivated to change, I just don’t know where or how to even start. 
It’s like I have all the right tools I just don’t know how to use them.",1.4344247787610631,3.070927530973453,3.1231946902654886,92.79735840707966,79.0,5.935929203539826,21.919469026548683,6.742157984588678,0.2696697345132746,413,12,97,4,10,137,70,113,0.109,0.79,0.10099999999999999,0.267,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,2,12,6,0,3,2,0,4,0,0,4,3,26,22,9,0,2,9,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,0,7,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,1,4,12,3,15,20,5,13,0,2,0,0,1,7,0,2,6,65,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044841218688658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756150130945187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185071357452421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213668126417377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18534013806696809,0.0,0.0,0.13821268273861978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4232277553859765,0.14949368368384475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21865693660608884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3450075418944739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044654037044528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396810845280575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15382842628073412,0.15516187181015548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103617028310508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17870486189735907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962272372807732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21876149640868447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733568585471358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14207218618539344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18073139446880573,0.0,0.0,0.12342556442178758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523420377150617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ddoommeenniicc,2020/02/07,"Does it ever get better? Is there a ""normal"" any more once you address your mental health? Within the past 6/7mo I began addressing my mental health. I got prescribed anti-deppresants, first Lexapro, which was an absolute nightmare for me, and now Fluvoxamine. Since switching to Fluvoxamine things have been a lot better. My background anxiety is pretty much non-existant, most things that would give me a major panic/anxiety attack no longer do so, and my depressive thoughts are not nearly as strong as they've been in the past.

But I don't want this to be my life, having to depend on pills just to feel normal. I want to get off them eventually. Some of my friends and family have told me I just haven't been the same since I started taking medication. But idk whats going to happen if I end up deciding to taper off the drugs. I cant remember what I was like before being on medication besides the fact that I was constantly suffering from anxiety, overthinking, and more prone do falling into depression. 

I just don't know what to do, which is why I'm here to see if any one had any positive experience stopping their medication. Do things go back to ""normal,"" or is dealing with my mental health going to be something thats going to follow me for the rest of my life?",7.632444373808006,7.271155194214878,8.053471074380166,70.47922759059125,63.173553719008254,11.24780673871583,33.49141767323586,10.727762888450028,3.6007567705022265,1015,36,178,23,13,336,145,242,0.11800000000000001,0.8079999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.6921,0,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,2,2,4,9,9,1,0,10,0,27,10,0,1,2,34,48,12,0,8,9,0,1,1,1,1,10,0,2,0,13,6,0,1,5,0,0,6,6,4,0,2,11,2,26,5,29,33,9,26,0,3,1,0,8,9,0,7,12,135,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20413941294392265,0.0,0.22964443721273134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383644210413064,0.0,0.0769424962588508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514649286475741,0.0,0.0,0.1769957033073931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813287227192896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031608619625336,0.172368736349458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756606256556594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604165261139845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862637779237625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051297781516776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788110180556668,0.09433076782424213,0.0,0.05059500782219116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851137864397685,0.0,0.0,0.0773086524366712,0.0,0.10455788191747682,0.09598982911087256,0.22747310290557615,0.0,0.08002975686746591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848564008817437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190878058573228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05499216929490393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413553270204953,0.0488858708728111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507023394243357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024097234032868,0.30252079450743635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355803424424451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941223469097993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656414199762974,0.06780547741845504,0.0,0.0,0.11740271522750242,0.0,0.0,0.1910434723248092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180034301968184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335220550340595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973748978054601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655467810237078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703361208247048,0.0,0.0,0.07082531425047181,0.0,0.0,0.0836573940078978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523514377519308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994328180583632,0.0,0.0,0.07943907795961028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561476517659367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803984626071845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029155864654276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108209283480169,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,japanese_salaryman,2020/02/07,Is it normal to not remember your childhood? I'm 19 and I can't remember anything  before the age of 11. Even if I can recall something I'm not sure if it really happened.,0.7325000000000017,2.9611616944444457,3.9811111111111153,82.55000000000003,84.83333333333334,6.933333333333335,25.66666666666667,8.07648339933343,2.0423000000000004,135,6,26,3,4,49,28,36,0.061,0.9390000000000001,0.0,-0.2411,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,6,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25271075811310306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613128887345317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20283153672995144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27156066497878545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30088520590216683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19673116070144256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6957513167705662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364146193889514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28943081399297405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,che_em,2020/02/08,"Can I get some Silence There is constantly noise at my house. From the time I wake up to whenever the last person goes to bed. Sometimes it's the tv, roommates talking, music blaring, and the occasional dog barking. My house is fairly small so wherever I'm at I can hear the tv, music, ect. I can't think when there's noise going on. All i can think about is how I just want silence. For the noise to stop. I can't form or process my thoughts unless it's completely silent. And i get super stressed and angry over it. Why could this be? Will I always need it to be quiet to be able to form thoughts?",1.1834521575984986,3.3963974390243936,2.5861788617886208,93.37300187617262,82.73983739837398,5.410631644777986,22.46966854283928,6.67199483983844,0.4955871169480929,467,16,101,5,13,151,75,123,0.071,0.884,0.045,-0.4696,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,7,2,0,1,6,0,13,1,1,1,1,17,24,8,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,5,3,0,1,4,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,2,12,1,15,17,4,12,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,2,5,65,17,0,0.2046143035797326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17025549188844388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145342043533148,0.22111537160662512,0.0,0.16336787179100107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21380505695293767,0.0,0.11628702406283845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306151910489789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4721948685774855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16678796692478864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171891344594515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786613175442162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20236877821455065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17106671981467558,0.2343849934310151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644612265653239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622171675408572,0.0,0.3248818028056168,0.11931224588198368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068681762513055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18463258326168144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,karl3141592,2020/02/08,"Alternate Reality In Hotels I feel very weird when I'm in hotels. My perception of time shifts while I feel like I'm in an alternate reality. The smell, the sound of the AC, the quietness, the carpets, the empty halls, all of those things make me feel a strong disconnection with reality. Another weird connection that came with this feeling was the the color beige. This feeling is neither pleasant nor uncomfortable, it's just....weird.

I currently am in a hotel and was going to my room, when this feeling overwhelmed me. I don't know what to do so I might aswell just ask you guys if you had similar ""episodes"".",3.70214229249012,6.2178699652173925,4.699446640316207,79.99059288537548,75.43478260869566,8.355731225296443,28.715415019762844,9.095868883498916,2.7298695652173914,486,21,89,12,11,158,74,115,0.091,0.805,0.10400000000000001,0.1308,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,0,1,4,6,0,1,11,0,8,0,0,1,1,17,21,7,0,1,2,0,6,1,0,1,0,2,2,1,8,4,0,0,8,3,0,2,3,3,0,0,4,10,11,3,11,16,2,13,0,1,1,0,4,6,0,2,6,59,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480304150522422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22113083040216905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27053612807220984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7176034458618026,0.16898258865885954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442983269843653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342095232079205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12999494047622304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556037806328745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15789075945272796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25092913260356264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15714514535984314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792704200704864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19516838456804456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FreexSerene,2020/02/08,"I want someone to be envious of me. I want someone to look at me and think “I wish I could do that.” “I wish I had that” “I wish I was her”

I know it sounds horrendously full of myself and evil, but my entire life has been me comparing myself to others and feel like I’m not good enough.

I want someone to envy ME for once.",0.8210476190476186,2.158624057142859,3.2885714285714305,92.26476190476193,79.85714285714286,6.3809523809523805,20.238095238095237,7.1686216300943375,0.2605238095238089,244,6,59,3,6,85,43,70,0.16699999999999998,0.657,0.17600000000000002,-0.3419,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,15,18,4,0,7,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,3,18,2,8,13,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,44,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510004909808264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19541612187015514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562700881344444,0.13511055100015287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586286229097939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393785640502866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358419817149872,0.09239665741798392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881691299721262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20141137603569914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4807336200745227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118331654869514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3346515171530563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6524513813795177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,danij005,2020/02/08,"I don’t know what to do... Trigger warning - suicide

Hey reddit... this is my first time posting on here, because honestly and truly, I don’t know what to do. I feel like I need to vent, so I apologise in advance for the graphic post.

Just a bit of background, I’ve been surrounded by mental health issues for a number of years, and it’s never usually been an issue for me. I’ve always stepped up where I can to help and support those around me who need it. I’ve been involved (in some way) with 8 active suicide attempts in the last 3 years, whether that’s being first on scene, contacting the police and/or ambulance service remotely, or sitting with the person in hospital. I’m also a mental health first aider, and a medical first responder.

The last incident I dealt with has really messed me up... I got a message from a friend of my partner (at the time) to say that my partner had taken an overdose. The ambulance had already been called, so I rushed over to her flat. I arrived before the ambulance service, so I took my response bags out of my boot. I couldn’t get a response from her buzzer, or by knocking directly on the door once I got into the building. In the end, her housing officers broke down the door so we could gain access, and I was able to provide treatment to her until paramedics arrived. She was completely unresponsive when we got to her, and it was very touch and go for a few hours until she was stabilised in hospital, however she has since made a full recovery, and was discharged from hospital within a week. This included a couple of days in the psychiatric unit for assessment.

We have since broken up (3 weeks after this) and are no longer speaking, (I won’t go into detail, but it was a reasonably amicable breakup). However, now that the pain of the breakup has subsided, I’m now realising the magnitude of what happened, and it’s hitting me like a freight train. Each time I close my eyes, I can see her unconscious body, and I can feel the fear of not knowing if she was alive or not.

I’ve also got a ton of what-ifs going round in my mind - what if I’d have missed the message? What if the housing officers weren’t in that day? What if we’d had to wait for the police and ambulance to arrive before breaking into the flat? (It was initially categorised as a low priority call, as she was conscious and talking to her friend when the call was made, but when we arrived I asked the housing officer to call 999 again to upgrade the response). And I keep thinking if only I’d have seen the signs sooner, I could’ve stopped it altogether. And I just don’t know what to do to make it stop:..",6.95600879089206,6.198722554474712,7.353510592304365,76.24859417783543,64.70038910505835,10.649834270067736,36.54676466349617,9.994966539143718,3.5278953163280016,2059,90,396,39,27,676,238,514,0.064,0.875,0.061,-0.5749,3,0,0,0,0,2,74.0,5,0,0,7,17,12,0,1,42,0,40,6,2,5,1,69,73,39,2,9,15,0,4,2,4,1,4,2,2,3,24,29,0,4,9,0,0,7,10,6,0,4,27,9,50,6,68,40,6,71,0,3,4,0,38,29,0,9,32,278,74,2,0.08277500133391033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09134427230277012,0.13239027732188766,0.06887543207691679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368730050656595,0.07738345244338267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05045887252336625,0.0,0.14087085893646772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036886291924363,0.09194436619368224,0.0,0.0,0.3380901246475458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678801403830108,0.0,0.0,0.13217820620393486,0.09158896457028416,0.0,0.1067660561107334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733140822597961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314488932085993,0.08370705556986513,0.05913447749217286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816334953959804,0.0,0.0,0.1279035213966208,0.0,0.04324652178477807,0.0,0.14112882242614666,0.0,0.2648109208280242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.073197660310937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17597191136876147,0.0,0.0,0.05548233857197689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151670255962452,0.2865337138647514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17279119154420547,0.0,0.07357422446715384,0.0,0.0,0.18196390391927006,0.13494534783879178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087936904986191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664741535589685,0.055252956148804405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338710547210591,0.16683546491298235,0.0,0.08357915484683366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275322930172206,0.0638411839456786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08815267493681629,0.0,0.0629541184988531,0.0880784374908065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227593838413124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585511403082852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05302778542954853,0.08510648752826425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658260034060066,0.0,0.0,0.06596095914757638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136944672953345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384072150687125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18108483306587492,0.09393209058557653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066531410610874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05303887854670628,0.0,0.0,0.14480030681019238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196607216925863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116496960519872,0.06829804499990229,0.0,0.06570294319968788,0.1327942263179021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660877394803242
mentalhealth,kephxi,2020/02/08,"Finally coming out I want to tell my parents this some day... hopefully soon.

But when I was younger (not even 10 yet), I was sexually assaulted. I don’t remember how many people who held me down and touched me inappropriately. But they were all male and heterosexual. They were my relatives. This was their way of punishing me for suspecting me to be gay because I was more feminine, caring, and emotional than most boys in my family. There were also moments where I was forced to have sex. Then there was another moment where I had a gun point to my head, all for “fun” though.

I am turning 25 today and this trauma has finally unfolded itself. It hurts so bad. I don’t know what to do. I’m battling so many things. I can’t tell if I’m straight or gay. I know that shouldn’t matter, but I think about it. How messed am I? I know I’m not normal and struggle with infancy and anxiety. Constant waves of emptiness. I have too many deep and dark thoughts that I hate being alone. But I do not have the courage to ask people’s space and time.

I also think I have borderline personality disorder.

I don’t know.",1.9978919026725173,4.408203683486242,3.7496410051854814,85.06135420821703,80.97247706422019,7.644515357000397,24.615875548464302,8.587818076936951,1.8971046669325884,865,33,176,21,23,289,129,218,0.18899999999999997,0.7490000000000001,0.062,-0.9816,1,1,0,1,0,0,31.0,0,0,3,0,17,13,4,1,2,0,26,4,1,2,2,41,44,23,0,5,9,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,11,11,0,1,9,0,0,1,8,9,0,0,12,1,31,4,16,29,5,23,0,1,0,3,11,9,0,5,12,125,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13858243357646985,0.0,0.21400886662405533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030702626935873,0.10236105487272497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250903411328294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172223659060904,0.08156676108169156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642390961842688,0.0,0.0,0.11526183083809287,0.0,0.1445965119797639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629365813104473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533530153930832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051349187455354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837745523276704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12614018025394888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931553815556035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132105505099135,0.13732333246398876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289933023409167,0.0,0.0,0.14324185410868046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941446277778387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40697417549226056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311012539939701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857548299477766,0.0,0.0,0.18552815920633708,0.1168340452990407,0.0,0.0,0.12648971122764438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515758639961771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13988285280645515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23390429756076836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889461412811675,0.17147468098724114,0.13146349872994695,0.10622684246250323,0.07802322590986198,0.0,0.12683223321626064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554226451159966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892211538136637,0.10620879941087052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nevertimeatall,2020/02/08,"No history of mental illness, hands/arms feeling detatched  Hi all. So I realise that the internet is no place for a diagnosis, but I know you guys know your stuff so I was hoping some of you might be able to point me in the right direction.

About 5 days ago, after a fairly crappy night of sleep (4 hours), I was sitting at a table using my phone when I realised that I had stopped recognising my hands. It felt like I was watching someone's hands use my phone. My eyes darted over to investigate, and after a few seconds my brain readjusted and they looked like they were mine again. This was weird to me, but I blamed it on my shitty sleep the night before. FFW to today, it happens constantly. Whenever I'm focusing on whatever I'm doing, my arms and hands detach until I look at them for a few seconds. It's happening as I type this.

Last night I had a very paranoid experience. I was finishing up in the bathroom getting ready to sleep, and turned off the light, which happened to be the last night on in the house. Now, I'm not normally scared of the dark, but last night was not normal. I felt intense fear and paranoia (like someone was going to attack me in the darkness). I ran into my room as fast as I could and turned the light on. I almost had a panic attack from those 3 seconds of exposure to darkness. Now, what DID give me a panic attack, was when I decided to sleep and hallucinated a phantom hand waving at me in the dark. I quickly turned the light on (I've got a remote for it). Scared the living shit out of me it did, and I was too afraid to sleep with the lights off for about an hour, until I felt like I was too tired to be scared anymore lol, just gave up and slept. So yeah, that was weird, but shit happens I guess. What's with this constant dissociation though?",4.732133835316978,5.242895460893859,5.543563274228809,83.041332280787,69.25139664804469,8.348991984454699,28.414379402477532,8.321376580360154,1.8177836774350256,1397,46,285,19,23,457,175,358,0.195,0.7140000000000001,0.091,-0.9913,0,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,3,3,0,15,19,5,7,25,2,24,17,15,2,1,39,53,24,0,4,7,0,8,4,0,1,2,0,1,1,17,13,0,1,7,0,0,2,4,14,0,3,24,16,43,5,53,24,4,55,0,0,4,0,12,24,2,5,32,199,60,1,0.0770541147033186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830382350524902,0.0,0.07715856543156535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641697672742429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629805381045954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655673763088106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860178753346391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653624803707456,0.0,0.06152144064022181,0.0,0.0,0.04969352945577756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537370970522916,0.0,0.08670730136028619,0.03896087561109527,0.0,0.2219521014419567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040257594641181935,0.07391732807043239,0.04379162909866613,0.0,0.06162721455558225,0.0,0.0848837945034102,0.07629568798694174,0.2725547966280918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653212211274915,0.1517655632266937,0.08891010288415628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469385260350991,0.1884281632766893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505789931614777,0.0,0.06804019497985353,0.0,0.12941209955220526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765242429975043,0.08174223893944507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615503343009164,0.15099334454324068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18081280273574105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050514973265506,0.0,0.07284104448554386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06580379294010419,0.0,0.0,0.2314338330510459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15818988289114955,0.0,0.0,0.3855488113171736,0.0,0.13057540267613696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442069014683545,0.0,0.0,0.08820852629987368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570527647090146,0.0,0.0,0.08856236973328396,0.07303829103759878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514382504535104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13310003021890182,0.0,0.06357771438994762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PhonixRevolution,2020/02/08,"I feel like I’m dying on the inside I think I’m loosing my mind. I really don’t like nagging or asking anyone for help but I think it’s getting serious. I apologize for my bad English. 

I feel like there’s a heavy load on my heart, I’m not able to function correctly. I use my phone to run away from reality. I’m gay, and live somewhere where gays are very well hated. My parents are conservatives and I could never tell them. I feel like I’m not valid, I’m constantly hiding and I am always scared. I blame myself for being different and I’m ashamed of myself. 

I feel like I’m never going to be able to find love. And this is effecting my daily life, I wish I can just unplug and move on with life! I’m not being able to move on! I feel stuck, it’s like I’m screaming and nobody’s hearing me, I feel that constant pain and grief, I feel like I’m alone and I’m on survival mode. I’m terrified of going to a psychologist, I’m not able to trust anyone around me. No one will understand how much it hurts. I just want to set myself free. I don’t know what to do.",-0.2951503759398477,1.8672358508771936,2.3874686716791977,92.44894736842107,89.61403508771929,5.3624060150375925,18.230576441102755,6.868970318607317,0.15999448621553913,826,23,185,12,28,286,116,228,0.239,0.601,0.16,-0.9764,2,1,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,2,7,21,2,2,3,0,13,7,1,3,3,42,49,12,2,3,8,1,7,7,0,1,3,2,0,0,6,11,0,1,13,0,1,5,9,10,1,1,1,9,31,12,23,43,1,18,0,2,0,3,9,8,0,1,11,102,37,0,0.401906562918109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406349762641598,0.0,0.0,0.08360461410283619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051120679269202,0.0,0.0,0.08944551253415457,0.09393209573261524,0.0,0.09440111145414833,0.0,0.0838937980970682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217159107296108,0.0,0.08022242176386042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104278889861487,0.10497670419950206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3556280597667622,0.3589026610667819,0.0,0.0,0.0918338293389632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052494897760765116,0.0,0.1142063808233692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991998809772273,0.0,0.0,0.11324447652199575,0.11906530304065305,0.06734737432431476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756232200827112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055219334053784784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419392455890998,0.343614679725004,0.0,0.08872271458156522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068409112836366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145276446625116,0.0,0.0,0.21358153584832906,0.07386189192665807,0.0,0.1549875590380636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808557211422826,0.0,0.10691422986611768,0.0,0.11156741892138228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06436790890276277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059464566195248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782101268481547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12876274862109227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045997264984916,0.0,0.08677955725586868,0.0,0.0829037513669356,0.05926372596227111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034056677529956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554317816553138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pelgrin1506,2020/02/08,"Should I be scares? Recently I've been going through some rough times: A girl broke my heart, I've been feeling alone and useless, I haven't been enjoying my job and I just sleep all the time whenever I can but still I feel tired... Next tot that I started eating less and feel guilty whenever I do.

About a week ago I started talking about it with my brother and a friend. I've been trying to get through this but I feel like whatever I do is pointless...

One of the things I started doing was walking. I do it during my lunch breaks, when I come home from work and in the weekends. Whenever I'm walking on the sidewalk, I notice myself drifting towards the street. I'm constantly hoping a car will hit me and stop it all. I know it's bad to think that but to be quite honest: I simply don't care.

Should I be worried or is this just a side effect of the time I've been going through?",2.978351648351648,4.279607934065936,3.938241758241759,89.98175824175827,74.05494505494505,6.7384615384615385,26.736263736263727,7.1686216300943375,1.1653032967032972,692,25,148,7,14,223,103,182,0.147,0.757,0.09699999999999999,-0.7145,1,1,0,0,1,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,6,10,0,1,11,0,21,5,2,1,2,28,39,11,0,3,6,1,5,1,1,3,1,0,1,1,9,8,2,1,7,1,0,7,2,4,0,1,6,5,23,6,15,26,4,28,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,3,16,98,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408217604721573,0.0,0.0,0.16453333514006035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13264330637848534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16197060668573166,0.0,0.0,0.13684572389671815,0.0,0.17167360791454414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16255569678912726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32130201862972096,0.11349119174900844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273654632459255,0.0,0.08299894586882185,0.0,0.180570105365888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882524790687772,0.0,0.0,0.1593517455073244,0.1577860157090508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764622667065706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730651384310223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761204943927727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895175839363333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808656745270573,0.0,0.0,0.1076491422101635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689695108766642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568572632015576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590487819985806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15897693444191927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3373304613184573,0.0,0.12686756296748225,0.13281591764202735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276874236348862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554099073759644,0.1017924870663372,0.0,0.0,0.2779014896628785,0.1825887362874896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785700992335484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742967927805798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565357804895107,0.16133228160547264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nenepink530,2020/02/08,What do you do for anxiety that turns into anger I’m having anxiety and it’s turning into anger and I’m getting mad and snapping because my life is falling apart. I’ve tried therapy and the therapist I have doesn’t help there’s 2 mental health clinics the one my insurance accepts I don’t want to go to because I have too much anxiety to go there and there’s a program I wanna join but my insurance doesn’t accept it and I cannot Afford it I don’t know what to do,0.7308545454545481,2.9352379400000044,3.2954545454545467,87.62772727272728,84.6,6.436363636363637,25.09090909090909,7.686295010490155,1.5568,374,16,77,7,11,130,57,100,0.134,0.76,0.106,-0.128,1,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,4,5,3,0,3,0,12,3,0,0,0,14,21,7,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,3,0,0,3,5,3,0,1,0,0,10,2,8,21,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,52,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5018756451827471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666142306709711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425283164526395,0.0,0.24856515504597715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324497824815484,0.0,0.0,0.1465785923708856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018244717729515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15446225654208062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203810098303855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16075715285237555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481852473299306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250083046921506,0.2539077956635021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14847138921512118,0.4757285733585535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898488793894033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1234Iamabigfork,2020/02/08,"My dad controls me My dad is controlling and emotionally manipulating. 

I broke contact with my family a few years ago because they drained me emotionally and didn’t let me be my own person. 

I’m now in contact with everyone exept my mom. My dad was nice at first but has been slipping into the same habits again. 

I live alone (I’m in my 20s) 

I tell him things like ”I’ll call you later this week”  then he’ll call me when he feels like it anyway.

He calls me up to vent about his problems even though he knows how mentally unstable I am. When I try to set boundries he gets pissy and start acting like a victim and tells me how hard it is to deal with me. 

He tells me when I should contact the rest of my family, I’ve tried telling him that I can decide myself when and how I contact other people but he ignores this and start bringing up reasons why I should call them (”she’s sick, he’s old ” etc. He pressures me to drop everything and contact them as quickly as possible. 

He keeps talking about all the bad things my mom does even though I don’t want to hear it. 

He never stops talking, he keeps repeating his lectures and his venting and it drives me insane. 

He makes a big deal out of small things. He treats me like a child and everything always have to be about his wishes and feelings. 

It got so bad yesterday that I got drunk and cut myself. I even called a suicide hotline because I couldn’t deal with it. 

He doesn’t respect me as an adult even though I’ve told him time and time again to stop telling me how to live my life. 

I’m so stressed out because I can’t see a way out. Confronting him scares me to death because he can snap out of nowhere when he doesn’t get his way. 

What to do?",2.791913630781828,4.283429647564475,3.6406989357347537,91.16082736389687,74.87392550143268,6.590298812934916,25.07173557101924,7.1686216300943375,0.8938709783053622,1333,44,291,14,28,425,170,349,0.195,0.742,0.063,-0.9942,0,1,0,0,0,2,25.0,0,1,3,3,26,18,3,3,10,0,21,3,0,9,2,51,43,33,2,6,2,5,3,4,0,3,2,1,0,3,15,22,1,7,5,1,0,3,7,11,0,1,6,5,54,7,33,30,6,44,0,1,1,0,61,12,0,0,29,180,69,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003054679739104,0.0,0.0,0.08182229356900401,0.0,0.0,0.06573603073964981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13192681647430188,0.19263565513925754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4033496080609632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17721502385307866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443429204281493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913522257253972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17773333604305627,0.0,0.0,0.08810816419688121,0.2087204243803893,0.0,0.0,0.07548984021926715,0.14200388917758416,0.0,0.1489521953572927,0.0,0.07989161609790298,0.05643907722941749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719909970942264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255061637224552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637030583202713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07077031535896533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904104719135264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044129627579172,0.0,0.0,0.043417458231643814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078494427485626,0.05580148124199786,0.154385635915221,0.0,0.139520507465415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273447896193468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961548058047782,0.0,0.0,0.1850524821907442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06093124796113265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289935738173335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05477007119925235,0.0689815390493732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906293624492004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559428827019486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122726074594874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909482975837287,0.0,0.06295440198908102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183610912755423,0.0,0.0,0.1320984953558711,0.09049657642285792,0.0,0.0,0.08641541543876717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699770356967194,0.3452563504650136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745634622328694,0.0,0.2328573263382891,0.0,0.0921334563240258,0.0,0.0,0.07548984021926715,0.0,0.10727440639200894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046597453422966964,0.1254162932593102,0.06337067572609265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128705825703027,0.0,0.09084845367868928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05087472724336593
mentalhealth,MentalHealthHelpNC,2020/02/08,"Mental health help for Schizophrenic/Bipolar sibling  

Hello Reddit,

My family and I live in North Carolina, USA (in case this is relevant).  I am writing this post because I need help figuring out how to help my brother.  He is 33 years old, and was diagnosed by his psychiatrist almost 10 years ago with schizophrenia.  This past year, a different doctor diagnosed him with Type 1 Bipolar with Delusions of Grandeur.  He has experienced mania and psychosis on many different occasions, and is currently in a mental hospital after his most recent battle with psychosis. 

He tends to repeat a regular cycle with his disease which follows as: Manic state, leading into psychosis, sometimes catatonic states, leading into a hospital/ER admission in which they force him to take his prescription medication.  After stabilizing him at the hospital, he is traditionally transferred to a mental hospital for a few weeks where they feed him, administer medication, and provide therapy.  His states of mania and psychosis tend to fade away after a few weeks (though the delusions of grandeur traditionally stay), and they release him to family.  

He has had some success staying on medication when my parents are constantly vigilant, but eventually he decides that he either does not need to take his medicine either because he believes that he is cured or does not want to take his medicine because they make him depressed/suicidal.  Eventually he stops taking his medication, and the gradual decline of his mental health begins again until he reaches another state of mania and psychosis.  

We have tried many different methods of helping him.  Hospital and mental hospital stays, a program called Inner Fire in Vermont, constant parental vigilance to name a few.  Our entire family is desperate for answers.  One idea that I was considering was having my parents gain legal guardianship over my brother, and then dictate that he takes an injectable medicine that requires much less vigilance than it otherwise would in pill form.  I don’t even know if that option is possible since he has never proven himself to be a danger to others (though he would likely end up on the streets if my parents completely stopped intervening.)  

TL;DR: My brother is mentally ill and our family wants to help him the best and most effective way we know how.  Is guardianship/forced medication possible? Are there other alternatives that seem to work well with these types of patients?  Any legal advice, help, advice of any other kind is very much welcomed.  Thank you.",11.382170179547224,11.014187154566748,10.27489461358314,57.61259172521471,55.674473067915685,13.379234972677596,46.0944574551132,12.45797560212912,6.267051834504295,2053,110,279,56,21,649,229,427,0.049,0.825,0.127,0.987,8,0,1,0,0,0,52.0,4,1,4,8,10,9,2,0,16,0,26,14,0,6,1,62,44,25,0,8,8,7,1,1,0,2,13,0,0,0,17,24,1,3,8,0,0,3,4,2,1,1,4,2,39,7,53,37,13,58,0,0,0,0,59,20,0,9,27,196,56,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857564042619068,0.058317589701409885,0.0,0.06587774051099238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947695467022784,0.06898504221716135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181051850582664,0.0,0.0,0.1203122881230884,0.0,0.0,0.07412117932807706,0.06904103573602798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717747618672047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897805432712514,0.14218812483743307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354800876298034,0.0,0.20620513098796386,0.0,0.06733737968669452,0.1151440258082128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058269137796237234,0.0,0.0,0.04345272394679189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480784003901127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13986032745357765,0.0,0.0,0.2645801132763441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426727734074988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850866226472455,0.07231134500081995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032140967702077576,0.0,0.058092504495507465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04391437519568689,0.13339854947216462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3313752685306424,0.3977963739571297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672432384496983,0.0975627684701654,0.05074019383102377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903402774057132,0.0,0.0445800314246339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922016449027466,0.0,0.06280262542177102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833343479555905,0.06300725561588523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495826700649088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059891434913787164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05442097734035862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506656884795971,0.0,0.0,0.2103655571233809,0.0,0.11000436530397456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196200760812355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24732405119988735,0.0,0.0,0.06056926781982945,0.07523495281353222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927385393359572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044666114313879283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542824526018146,0.07760759537443403,0.05221989736370751,0.10554323035024613,0.0,0.05915181705465121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04789485580598346,0.0,0.0,0.09346861206353574,0.0,0.0,0.12709702859239785
mentalhealth,fmleek,2020/02/08,"I have a friend that is very mentally unwell but I don't want to talk to her because firstly because I'm a little drunk rn and just want to chill alone. Now I'm thinking about just drinking a bit more and going to bed. I'm good friends with her but I'm sick of always listening to her self-depricating, I mean self-hatred and all and I know this sounds like me being a total douche but please hear me out. She recently started to see a therapist weekly which is great, but I'm not sure how much it will help because I fear she might not be able to be really honest and I don't know if talking about her problems really helps her of if she just dwells in how fucked her life is. Seriously, it makes me angry but what makes me most angry is that her parents had unprotected sex because her parents are like massively unwell themselves, her mom is weirdly abusive, they fight all the time, she controls her life, she says she is exactly like her and her grandmother but she also feels weirdly connected with them and her mom texts her every morning and every evening and demands replies (she's 21 and lives like 400km away from home) and I'm just crying internally because there is so much wrong in this family and I fear my friend will never be free from all this shit and will never be happy because she cannot let go and just makes humorous self-depricating jokes about it and it makes me sick.

I don't know what to do. I thought about writing her a long letter where I lay out a bit more that being okay is possible and how good it would be for her to take some time out and go to a mental facility. She actually also talked about it with me how she thinks this is generally a good idea, but on the other hand she thinks that all the facilities are like pretty bad. I guess this is true to some extent but I just wish she could see it's not about the best facility but about taking a time out and exploring what else you can be and what there is more to life.

I guess I'll try to explain that to her in greater detail but I just wish she could change because it's so hard. The best thing you can do for your friends is getting well yourself. Nothing is harder for others to deal with than your constant self-hatred. I wish she could be free. Thanks for reading",4.9363333835265735,5.3829979126637575,5.409485017316673,84.40849344978167,68.78165938864629,8.413311248305979,28.02017768408372,8.326086129247049,1.6951702153290165,1796,56,374,24,29,576,198,458,0.19699999999999998,0.62,0.183,-0.8378,2,1,1,0,1,0,27.0,0,4,2,4,28,38,3,3,15,1,43,11,2,9,10,98,83,39,0,12,22,4,3,5,4,5,5,4,2,0,26,27,2,1,12,4,2,4,9,12,1,1,2,9,60,28,44,63,19,27,0,0,2,2,59,11,2,8,17,262,86,1,0.0696299279275092,0.08250007862402442,0.06794876541939181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211560604536109,0.0,0.11136605641405807,0.057937677972915776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541960936496008,0.0,0.05813808137543764,0.2971203044808905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146144627069499,0.0,0.15203569460723407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365923114834227,0.0,0.0,0.07524521560455928,0.07809588492364876,0.16678149483394245,0.0,0.07648520625884024,0.0,0.0717853982533867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821082097854149,0.0,0.0,0.05816687006623133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04598991070062946,0.0,0.11733243478618595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656408991451652,0.1567060543814288,0.03520698370539292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059227181124674164,0.0,0.0,0.2151836383691573,0.06437174636727158,0.0363787634728305,0.0,0.11871687799056678,0.1752068399281201,0.0,0.07676724135531843,0.15341043151927616,0.0,0.0,0.07412235304208226,0.062374738711388024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847798932332173,0.0,0.09334294590784303,0.0,0.06984449498859548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786037132462012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148003622270836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07120131887782889,0.14754503189042698,0.17008832820934072,0.06978748022177585,0.06148450203940675,0.061620295089796065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18591407030745524,0.0,0.0,0.07584740422589789,0.0,0.0,0.14034118043419996,0.07386635000481892,0.0,0.16309946007721465,0.0,0.0,0.10237201749782016,0.0,0.10740578593318306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681179377598613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15463158963416962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643275138948083,0.0,0.07849728164934826,0.0,0.07083866911322731,0.0,0.06662643729945485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964877077488528,0.0,0.08921342961313268,0.0,0.06875115361131974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055372513428622726,0.0,0.0,0.11097207508213162,0.0,0.2905568022056326,0.0,0.07147412040863715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049284421370363235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562538303532854,0.0,0.10470608050007417,0.16789769560001888,0.0,0.0641058825598004,0.0,0.08084571305006434,0.04625903014237542,0.13384813884805558,0.0,0.055278385036018216,0.12180531277073448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047274150434269295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574519827761665,0.08213907108174094,0.0,0.05585292817094094,0.0,0.06260566742500448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402129423247237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04946310301947311,0.07612939549952252,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wannabeanonymous00,2020/02/08,"No sadness or fear when my friend told me she’s committing suicide I don’t know if it’s the right r/ to write it in, but yeah. So, it was a prank. A very realistic one though. She sent me the pictures of her ready to commit it and made the text seem realistic. I didn’t know it was a prank, and I thought I’m supposed to feel sad or be scared, but I wasn’t. I was angry and annoyed and when she was saying the life was useless, I thought that I know it is and she should stop whining and deal with it (that’s not what I texted her though). I thought why the hell I should deal with her whining and text her back when I have better things to do. I just wanted her to shut up. She’s one of my best friends and I genuinely love her, it’s just. I simply didn’t care. I don’t know why. Is it unhealthy? Or is it some kind of psychological response? I’m sorry if it makes me seem like a monster. I just don’t know what’s happening. Can you please help me?",-0.4390942028985521,1.5897083816425166,1.511914251207731,99.58497282608695,88.37198067632849,4.6094202898550725,18.769927536231886,5.985473137389443,-0.4471028985507246,733,21,183,6,24,241,98,207,0.203,0.606,0.191,-0.1754,0,0,0,0,0,1,25.0,0,1,0,2,10,17,2,2,9,1,20,2,0,2,2,42,41,21,1,5,11,0,1,1,2,2,1,1,0,0,16,10,0,1,11,0,0,1,8,9,0,2,14,2,34,8,12,24,2,10,1,5,0,1,22,4,1,8,6,122,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10717217335198237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14626737643899013,0.12326747324131652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421039596062709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873827681439902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683767447418534,0.07047310930519794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21536437478392853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232504639151226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342134624308893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513951284159285,0.3829892833764836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984459716559042,0.06809247532102086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579302401970646,0.13188171952290126,0.09303511135593694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18889068417165306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299389712680267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190270449477254,0.0,0.1108380434976351,0.13954051389340075,0.0,0.0,0.25376684931262783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560209419382004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652526456416047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15245562213705624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925957677844668,0.0,0.2738740410749247,0.3319488857770061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318052684489334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500047535639765,0.08220806109107652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515318074145492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RealWeakMan,2020/02/08,"Im ? I don’t even know how to feel , at this point I just feel worthless my whole family hates me , my mother keeps saying she doesn’t in the end I know they are upset I’m here leeching off them they hate me because of all the problems in school I had as a child adhs they said or something , yet now that I’m nearly an adult somehow I don’t freak out because I don’t want to go to school or some other tantrum they always attributed as a mental illness , they treat me like a danger all the time like I’m a worthless scum they have to take care of. Now at this time I just don’t know how to keep going , being treated like that has lead me to just feel like everyone thinks of me like a weird guy or some insane person they keep in their group out of kindness even tought I don’t think it is true , at least one person says so , the only person I care about at least one bit , but even her I am afraid to lose because I often feel very bad and I’m scared of her getting tired to have to comfort me when I feel down (which is nearly every day at this point) I just don’t know what to do because I already was out of home , my mother had kicked me out and I went trough hell , spend  three months in hospital and then 1 year in a house where teens that can’t stay at home go , sorry for the lack of vocabulary I’m from France and am learning English in school . I don’t want to go back there it was a place filled with drugs and all kinds of terrible things , I always managed to stay clear and true to myself but it’s getting harder and harder every day for me to endure that .",5.682331806974286,4.2761827245509,5.9567840789010225,87.3489239168722,67.562874251497,8.577386403663262,27.431489961253963,6.522977012572876,1.0063355406833394,1226,26,282,6,17,393,163,334,0.158,0.75,0.092,-0.9769,0,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,9,2,21,30,5,3,13,0,23,3,0,4,6,54,57,19,0,4,9,2,5,5,0,0,3,3,2,6,14,12,0,3,12,0,2,7,9,16,0,3,6,8,41,14,49,50,10,46,1,3,0,0,24,24,1,7,18,185,55,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931028354651812,0.0,0.14976393191410034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691995987605588,0.07514097876685479,0.2194372919682736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824981002135967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18350914569483645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607698039736693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436411853868356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970770485794655,0.0,0.0,0.17831996627801686,0.0,0.1516471438745652,0.08599283500688643,0.0,0.0,0.08483804921343582,0.0,0.2275175885120974,0.06429151581236894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940359856743144,0.0,0.20458196985095167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910790978073915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17770029058786527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805420334059052,0.0,0.0,0.10384064467383283,0.0,0.0,0.09720863680523303,0.0,0.0,0.2399716011529264,0.0,0.1874291756677419,0.19783273146625155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198318753578182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067992853358072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069248081152534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183211113082202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196411760127887,0.0684442625786029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357370775496693,0.0940242601979042,0.0,0.17014626623364498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611181504425476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560461512028658,0.1431332014188334,0.09009939119693053,0.2732352806439092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928154539267753,0.0,0.1007405769864254,0.0,0.19184261599000044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766406102060189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978781410512898,0.11532865574764667,0.0,0.0,0.104952097994559,0.10343451721036458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425422572891256,0.10616122943970838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083425059627779,0.0,0.10047474992484837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05795299093430228
mentalhealth,avacalypse,2020/02/08,"Help me?? I can’t really fit this into a post but i really’d like someone to listen to me and give me some advice. Please, someone’s gotta be out there to help me, i can’t be completely alone?????",0.529285714285713,2.2408312142857163,3.395476190476192,89.42035714285717,82.09523809523809,7.057142857142857,20.02380952380953,8.07648339933343,0.8508380952380956,149,4,34,3,4,53,30,42,0.0,0.667,0.33299999999999996,0.9254,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,7,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,7,1,5,4,1,4,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,1,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28831860491815986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3055819269605056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30935340983166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28303802033605113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3955304384566529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441461063365623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238753542166653,0.0,0.0,0.2825755170836154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18901603430184427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4999883578424419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,catatania,2020/02/08,"Suicidal ideation - I am so scared Things have been hard and I am getting one blow after the other. It is making my life difficult and it is messing with my head pretty bad. I have been crying all day and just imagining ways to die. Not exactly on purpose but I keep seeing it in my head. I feel it almost like a release. I imagine my wrists cut and blood flowing out and the release of all this pain and hardships. I see myself dead in bed with blood everywhere. I see myself in the tub, filled with water and blood slowly tinging it red. I keep imagining it. I look at rasor blades, knives and scissors and I imagine I can use them. I don’t want to do it and I don’t want to die but it keeps coming to my head and I am so scared that I will lose control of myself and do it. I feel weak compared to these thoughts. I am alone. My family is far away. I have no SO and a few friend-acquaintances but no one that can help or that I dare to admit that I feel this way to.",0.2978708439897701,2.451651681372553,2.1563853367433943,95.40003836317136,86.10784313725489,5.1164535379369145,19.6538789428815,6.498293943080001,0.05656973572037537,749,22,169,8,23,247,105,204,0.245,0.6940000000000001,0.061,-0.9918,0,1,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,1,2,4,10,1,2,5,0,19,11,7,3,3,45,37,20,4,2,6,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,18,18,1,4,9,0,0,3,5,9,0,2,3,9,31,1,20,33,3,15,0,1,5,0,3,8,0,2,3,122,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230653901546774,0.13684417369497998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12413807326759894,0.0,0.11032088811718498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381608471253955,0.0,0.0,0.14819215184342766,0.0,0.0,0.1451357816198284,0.08521126406359296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742548317596171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455798538898175,0.0,0.2004228012904718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208132746878892,0.0,0.06903113071466505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836022806258086,0.0,0.4068025970197625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856223363760844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3523228017063246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933255138476079,0.06455079005874904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109537671074484,0.14781680134700026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819608793653984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790659370295168,0.0,0.14059290506251565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442110067485538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26456522176811426,0.0,0.31586537402763243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452596724453387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777959588639883,0.0,0.0,0.10489442352725613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411568011030485,0.0,0.0,0.15586436732132414,0.20975321358455656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thesurvivor911,2020/02/08,"No sadness or fear when my friend told me she’s committing suicide I don’t know if it’s the right r/ to write it in, but yeah. So, it was a prank. A very realistic one though. She sent me the pictures of her ready to commit it and made the text seem realistic. I didn’t know it was a prank, and I thought I’m supposed to feel sad or be scared, but I wasn’t. I was angry and annoyed and when she was saying the life was useless, I thought that I know it is and she should stop whining and deal with (that’s not what I texted her though). I thought why the hell I should deal with her whining and text her back when I have better things to do. I just wanted her to shut up. She’s one of my best friends and I genuinely love her, it’s just. I simply didn’t care. I don’t know why. Is it unhealthy? Or is it some kind of psychological response?",0.1550231347599791,2.077575005494509,1.89084441873916,98.56731347599772,84.65934065934066,4.930480046269519,20.01850780798149,6.05967700443912,-0.28048791208791224,649,19,161,5,19,212,89,182,0.221,0.609,0.17,-0.8693,0,0,0,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,0,2,9,16,2,2,8,1,18,2,0,1,2,37,34,20,1,4,9,0,1,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,13,10,0,1,9,0,0,1,7,9,0,2,14,2,30,7,12,17,2,10,1,5,0,1,20,4,1,6,5,110,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879187122068127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16212580936155874,0.13663223716560366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15751099134712826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31854105143769873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17384214806859594,0.07811386354561799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387143628302817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608756618370098,0.3396106448664732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911956734081378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394316102999196,0.14618044733005042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093703722440218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193205804244235,0.0,0.12285519811453735,0.15466961467741785,0.0,0.0,0.14064023309771814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129159032509305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689849899030627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263507940728933,0.0,0.30356769673047074,0.3679390653165415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762007244269829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274689243633,0.09112112875009104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788030991604561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CrazyDungeonMasters,2020/02/08,I need to get help I'm a suicidal teen and have been for over a year I'm scared because it's getting worse everyday and nobody knows. I need some help but don't know how to open up. I'm sure many others are in the same place too. All comments welcome.,0.10933333333333196,2.1389563272727297,1.9304545454545448,97.54901515151516,85.72727272727272,5.121212121212121,20.075757575757574,6.42735559955562,-0.018151515151515696,198,6,47,2,6,65,44,55,0.12,0.691,0.18899999999999997,0.5994,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,4,0,0,1,2,13,13,4,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,6,12,3,7,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,2,25,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669786336598576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862230072548501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3672046014390121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010777147050125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777111283131814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4062153092430872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861873177143454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742409569622948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996232029150181,0.0,0.2581656534127613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791471194767895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763950175635781
mentalhealth,pixtiny,2020/02/08,"I take it personally when my ideas are rejected and its beginning to really affect my self esteem. I’ve always had self esteem problems.

I feel like my intuition is always at war with logic. My thought process always seems so conflicted, but it my perception always makes room for other options. I mean, isn’t that empathy?

I think this hurts me at work. I think that this is hurting me at home. Work is hurting me and I’m bringing it home and it’s hurting my relationship with my husband. He’s very assertive and I love that about him, but it makes it very hard for me to feel seen and understood. He can take anything that I’m upset about and make it about himself and frame it as abusive even though I haven’t said anything that attacks his character. The only thing that is abusive is that I’m frustrated by the fact that the company I work for is a plummeting shithole, the management is interested in only pocketing the money and not interested in making improvements that’ll save money. I’ve shared good ideas, had them shut down, only for them to implement them without involving me later on at head office and continue to let my branch get away with being reactive and underachieving, while I’m scrambling to try to keep things in order without having the appropriate tools or support to do it. 

I’m in the process of giving up right now. I’ve got glowing reference letters. But I’ve been trying to find a new job for almost a year now and now I’m scared that I’m too depressed to even look attractive to a prospective employer (I’m waiting for exam intakes to happen, until I can earn the credentials that I’ve been studying for, for the last 4 years. Classes ended in November. Tests are in August.) I guess I’m just really past my resistance threshold and feel totally hopeless that an answer will come before it’s too late. 

I’ve got ADHD, if Rejection Dysphoria is a real DSM thing, then I’ve definitely got that. And I’m just....so sad. 

I’m sorry. This was a lot and probably made no sense. But I’m a total mess. I hate my job. I have a good home life. But I’m only happy when I’m making progress. My husband and I have been going to yoga, I want to go to it together. Then he makes comments like “it’s good for you to go alone. It helps you establish your independence.” “Bitch. I’m a self ducking starter, I’m the only person who makes sure that training, building & fleet maintenance gets done at my job and I just finished the course credits for my certificate with a 3.75 GPA. I just fucking want someone on my god damn ducking team!!” <—-that’s how I feel. And my mental health is suffering because of it. What the hell is wrong with me?",3.2914417791104467,5.370365695402303,4.6368015992004,82.03074962518744,74.99616858237547,7.834149591870731,28.01449275362319,8.652420539549441,2.2972990504747632,2111,87,396,43,46,699,252,522,0.182,0.688,0.131,-0.9886,4,2,0,0,0,1,62.0,0,3,3,6,18,38,8,2,23,0,31,5,1,11,4,80,92,34,1,4,13,2,5,2,0,2,2,1,4,5,38,23,0,3,17,2,3,5,6,23,0,0,15,9,47,15,56,73,3,47,1,10,3,2,30,19,4,7,24,241,85,16,0.0,0.1648163348811143,0.0,0.0,0.08358841469055144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964663675857931,0.07203526393164875,0.0,0.0,0.2314925244746981,0.07535994763029931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11447132391115157,0.0,0.0,0.07912584476526817,0.06534672708631277,0.0,0.0,0.04239847007252317,0.0,0.05918393136848873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059913195283048025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059905341482372976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117620727076078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061602742335295765,0.0,0.0,0.09187734908388544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14067104209649087,0.04968821633985497,0.0,0.0,0.06356959246204454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06430003148542966,0.07267646968463458,0.0667209566363979,0.11858461861656812,0.17501164656251447,0.16688211616904053,0.0,0.07661976048158059,0.0,0.061504917864243586,0.07403977526393826,0.062305248643632426,0.06866855113630893,0.07138078212891606,0.07393090099583732,0.0,0.0,0.0466194774845244,0.0,0.2093000491812341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978289383577259,0.15703228580332973,0.0,0.0,0.2070599408268666,0.061821328899792416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669445238911915,0.07845808597572049,0.0,0.0,0.0711219953475773,0.049126885274296435,0.06795953489759739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05840646102778824,0.0,0.0,0.0591309250417077,0.0627737159314462,0.06581212004716845,0.3249871595180986,0.0,0.0,0.07576290461327215,0.0,0.0,0.07009241499473633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717409790857559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644885007963346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663955929014499,0.0,0.12146086732810267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07498920243042398,0.06655221052531675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916580698715225,0.08911403926061816,0.0,0.0,0.07467320007381388,0.0,0.059397331179012615,0.0661602169748265,0.0,0.0696340409043678,0.0,0.0,0.06331785182727412,0.217674825344184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05893148472191365,0.0,0.0,0.07785816713533293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892718826996914,0.06555227150960796,0.0,0.10458943018972916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386224824942365,0.08913268142094809,0.06833483569304,0.05521680083060219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944429670752552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147759540445243,0.0820475620873504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13409197655952765,0.0,0.15190482850731338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604458172778181,0.0,0.08957887256816763
mentalhealth,ETownBeatDown22,2020/02/08,"Manic episodes of spending money? So I have been diagnosed with schitzo affective disorder, but I think it was misdiagnosed. Is it possible to have short periods of mania where you almost feel like you have no control over what you are doing? Like I just spent my whole paycheck in 1 day.... the day after I got paid.... all on online shopping basically. I just find I get into this frenzied state where I buy almost everything I think I could use without even thinking and I only stop when my card gets declined. I just get these ideas in my head of things I should buy and then minutes later I'm trying to buy them.",3.868813559322035,5.908812830508477,4.812000000000001,81.58003389830509,73.23728813559322,7.431864406779661,27.90169491525424,8.238735603445708,2.0595701694915256,486,19,88,8,10,158,84,118,0.069,0.877,0.054000000000000006,-0.1846,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,1,1,8,2,0,0,1,0,10,2,1,3,1,24,22,6,0,2,5,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,2,6,1,8,0,2,0,0,0,5,1,19,2,13,15,2,17,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,2,10,64,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3705855878764364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075402928616793,0.1477409482611693,0.0,0.0,0.23867351244830845,0.0,0.0,0.18781369455475816,0.0,0.0,0.21207411773426207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221846957522345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16630378230147602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093562774993039,0.13219401337831607,0.0,0.0,0.1691249993540449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900303607217613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14799495951958627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18990643582703692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088898497415204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808043098989484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407327490829528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20860700712052707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15470336440252322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229336561411908,0.3557022493909183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563134453892727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15981684168555213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206592740393796,0.0,0.17837384644673665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lesleg0re,2020/02/08,"My experiences living with schizoaffective disorder and what its like going into a psychosis Stay in my room until work, either sleeping the whole time or manic af from lack of sleep and minimal drug use. Not good i know but i have to start being honest at least w myself if im ever going to seek help 
I found this year that i enjoy dulling down my reality instead of facing problems. 

 Drugs give me a temporary false belief that i am smart or happy, or looking as good as i feel.. just makes me feel happy, like how i should feel naturally.
I don't want to escape as much as i want to numb my thoughts from hurting myself. When my thoughts become verbal my moods lash out on others and it makes me hate my existence that much more. 
Which triggers a wave of suicidal thoughts, self doubt, and a can't do attitude. 
I just give up
I am sick and tired of holding the weight of these ideations within the thin barriers of my skull, im growing old and tierd.
When it started, i thought i brought these thoughts into my head, and i would feel shame for it. For why am i doing this to myself?
6 years later its gotten progressively worse, i quit drinking and began a regaulr pill regimen  (also smoking marajuana) to keep myself balanced, or calm. I was less on edge, found a bit of happiness within myself and my creative side and began to feel human again. 
Now the flip side to that is the rap sheet of side effects that come along with these pills.
Stabalize your mind, sacrifice your body.
It's taking a chance everytime, adverse reactions and misdiagnosis over those 6 years didn't help. By the timei was aged 25 i had been on or around 25 different pills and different combinations within of those pills. 
By the end of my 6 years medication tweaking process, and 3 misdiagnosis, 6 hospitalizations, and pretty much a team of specialists, and a dozen doctors,  along w a cat scan of my brain in 2014.
It took hell of a toll on my body, and brain functions. My liver an kidneys wont last forever..
The runaround, a serious uphill battle im still pushing through..learning a lot about my mind and mostly thought process.
Why am i so mean to myself? 

 and as of today my diagnosis is schizoaffective disorder bi polar type, i struggle with anxiety (mostly social) and frequent panic attacks (which can be triggered by the way someone i know looks me wrong) me being called sensitive would be a huge understatement. Around the time of my first hospitalization in 2009 i witnessed my friend and roommate at the time get beat within an inch from his life with brass knuckles to the face. 
I remember nothing past the porch where he laid still, getting beat on our own front lawn repeatedly. 
My mind permanently blocked that from me.Next time i have a memory from that moment im looking over him-- laying in the blood soaked grass, in total shock. His face was a blood puddle, in panic mode i went and scooped him from his back to his feet. At that second i embraced his tall frail figure as his wounds dripped down onto my suicidal tendencies shirt (oh the irony)  my arms wrapped all the way around his body, for i just wanted him to feel safty or comfort. Grabbing him by the hand i guidedus to a safer space indoors.
Around me was a blur, friends and neighbors scolded me, for ""he could have a neck or back injury! Leave him laying!"" 
I was not only in shock, but also processing a violent and traumatic event that changed my life forever. 
I was scared, he was petrified. 
I told all the neighbors and by standers basically to fuck off and
As for my friend- now gushing blood from his cuts, eye sockets, mouth and nose. 
just like a skipping cd in your old walkman, he was stuck in a constant shuddering loop fearing for his life. 
""They're going to come back and kill me""
Over and over and over and over..
Once into our house i lead him into the bathroom, swiftly locking the door behind.
""Call 911, they're going to come back and kill me"" again and again as he ran water over his face, pressing his broken bone structure completely flat, blood pouring from all parts of his kind and beautiful face. 
He couldn't feel it, he could barely process what had happened, for it happened so fast. 
I watched him try to
Rinse all the blood away only more would streamout.&Panic struck, the ambulance was now on its way but inwas starting to expierence by first delusion. 
After that summer i didn't see my friend again until 10 years later. 
What i said to him was, i have been through so much since then that stemmed from that dark moment in our past, struggled with literal demons inside my head, woken up to images of corpses laying in my bed. 
But i will never know how you managed to stay so strong, so beautiful, and so kind even after something so awful could happen. 
I have no idea how he did it i said, how he pulled through and came out on top.
Dude, he could have been beat to death if someone hadn't stepped in. 

One of the moments that shaped me, made me grow and helped me learn so much about myself id never had gotten the chance to if our paths may not have crossed. 
Cos i usually think ""man, i wonder what life would've became if these blips in time hadn't happened at all?""
Maybe id have some sort of success, or maybe just no chronic disorder that effects almost every aspect of my life in some sort of way. Im unsure, always wonder, then feel weak minded.
Soon after we went through this i found myself laying on my bare bed, last nights last breath escapingaway as the mourning sun crept through the crack in the window where the card board had shifted.
I stayed home all alone with my thoughts that night. 
Not knowing how many sleepless nights, and waking nightmares mixed with violent hallucinations id have ahead of me. 
The mind is a very fragile thing, science knows little about mental illness as it is-so to see me, 4 or 5 days later after that night, days became weeks then into one bad blurred summer.
To explain it all in full detail wouldn't make any sense whatsoever -but i basically looked like your local circle k crack head on no sleep talking to the air. 
Sad thing is, mental illness and drug addiction look a whole lot alike. 
Your brain looses one to many days of sleep then all the sudden i think im related to  Egyptian gods, and my brother is a cannabal living on an ancient Indian burial ground, and theres a government drone disguised as a house fly watching me.
The house was alive, and teeth snapped my feet at every step.
The windows were breathing. I sawa glimpse of a body on the stain in the laundry room, had conversations with hairless rats and sat in a chair crafted from hitlers bones.
I could feel the chill air pass, i felt negative spirits, saw shadow people while christmas carolers sang outside my door.
None of this was real, this was just a snipit of the things i've seen and heard but told they weren't really there. 
I was awake, yet dreaming in gruesome splashes and disorganized thoughts. 
I was alive to exist. 
I felt pain all over.
Once admited i was so unrulyi wasn't able to be near any other patients at least half a day to a day. I spent that time in the yellow hallway in the nude and a pair of flats, pissing on myself while flooding my room. 
When they brought my food, i ripped my name badge from the tray. I ate my name for dinner, refused the meal, kicking it across the hallway.
Water began to trickle out of my room, and by the time they asked me to get dressed they saw..
I shoved all the sheets, blankets and my clothes into the toilet, and sink only to keep them running and flushing til someone decided to check on my crazy naked ass.
I just didnt want to be alone.
So i made sure they had to keep me close, and segregating an unstable lil girl who wants to die and has no clue what reality is anymore is inhumane. 
I spent the next 3 weeks there making no damn sence, i was completely detached from reality coloring with crayons, banging my head inbetween the door way and the wall. 
It hurt everywhere in a different way, but they couldnt make it stop so i would hurt myself. 
I hadn't showered in over a week, 2 nurses insisted on helping me bathe. 
Once in the water all i could do was scream, cry and fight them.
I was 20.
Life hit different for me young, and life got in the way of a lot of things but it humbled me a bit and hardened me a ton.",6.227142857142859,6.568898020676695,6.050391604010028,81.29521146616544,65.97368421052633,8.830451127819549,31.5999373433584,8.567472430010655,2.3222125313283204,6555,239,1259,87,96,2050,673,1596,0.17,0.747,0.08199999999999999,-0.9994,5,2,5,0,1,5,187.0,5,6,8,16,59,62,13,8,92,1,88,83,46,19,16,244,196,117,8,25,33,1,17,4,6,9,26,5,18,4,59,85,9,8,42,7,3,25,27,38,0,8,80,39,174,23,214,92,40,235,5,6,16,4,85,104,5,29,100,818,233,10,0.03516097185261085,0.0,0.0,0.03833064927371786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03520863431852859,0.07283232569003233,0.0,0.05623643297444731,0.02925674526810035,0.03809689831220498,0.0,0.04782133316175197,0.0,0.0268980472274352,0.0,0.034870236042811385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520287803099436,0.032870762299884976,0.04000068148505116,0.03303489048394368,0.10814646798956316,0.029357942822154613,0.0,0.03883253095394768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677334930236403,0.15622365301818758,0.0,0.11775381905720765,0.0718065669876835,0.040214784809606635,0.0,0.0,0.03719564604157225,0.0908641916574204,0.07373122004395724,0.03799651940857875,0.0,0.16843904969994375,0.0,0.03862267654804993,0.11337959025153985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03649153758146848,0.14694292781839954,0.12089255984050624,0.035988744589094415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03444436649377081,0.12232669343780575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03114218473205442,0.0,0.0,0.02322349029762617,0.031805112044314784,0.05924927053221151,0.0,0.0,0.03439417733337845,0.0,0.03956586866623965,0.16000599453908387,0.0,0.06752009391041955,0.0,0.0,0.059815809391679985,0.04251678673174745,0.11565657237754474,0.10866111853106128,0.03250575190138655,0.05511046973218103,0.06745921620698965,0.07993116235501224,0.05898270997791909,0.028121441206439723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124370925153484,0.11228852505815744,0.0,0.03471418030596659,0.14434120424561514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09427063308531132,0.0,0.03526932161857938,0.0,0.0,0.12171312214639905,0.11292164275421072,0.03969245741339432,0.2278792995232964,0.0,0.0,0.09375806199501004,0.07780081164706124,0.0732294829367374,0.09661775295670648,0.08598265479683061,0.0,0.03723039234836455,0.0,0.0,0.17384663977080828,0.06871149919158273,0.03524053091505582,0.06209556464944365,0.0,0.14763180419573324,0.0,0.0,0.08967780270251255,0.0,0.06654032344734646,0.11735110870519368,0.07129541345158738,0.07064784436355348,0.03830060613960184,0.0,0.03542098001965565,0.07086797935718618,0.0,0.1775127915238473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923679992471165,0.0,0.05423661819578288,0.0,0.0747881849155607,0.13198476085647956,0.0,0.033737900789235005,0.0,0.07379105049443413,0.11233586247914568,0.07147795350129882,0.08022451052395048,0.03741375308401811,0.08250764922887703,0.0,0.038075906104683706,0.06713025236042218,0.024376190703369226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035771348971661905,0.0,0.03364430146997675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037398021614825666,0.0,0.04002088368464552,0.022525018916922837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0398305268871828,0.0,0.06689227202673874,0.0,0.035202266705597035,0.0,0.056037484520317885,0.0,0.03668056196529774,0.0,0.0,0.02908551925993725,0.0,0.1407454587439117,0.03584218287814089,0.0893753320471524,0.02706863394180236,0.0,0.0,0.07466135054942072,0.1124307530361454,0.05615919508154791,0.02939614687288195,0.0,0.07351576409162172,0.0,0.07692079270019356,0.0,0.03313879985807612,0.0,0.02643667499622537,0.028261057301186582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343754935139266,0.045059462050670934,0.0,0.22331107305843784,0.14351851811012026,0.04041236475666626,0.03332849005174808,0.06719563079103127,0.03906513346818599,0.02387199186111371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03036779044264915,0.03872484299096402,0.029011484133267217,0.10369426094018963,0.19536399993654294,0.08461203222911047,0.04281659129551239,0.0,0.06518914634014666,0.06345461631531649,0.0785119388054905,0.0,0.0,0.07626114821503042,0.025597606273854347,0.0,0.03583203420367353,0.1248867279326436,0.038443003058997186,0.0,0.11321256537668245
mentalhealth,mrgoodcat1990,2020/02/08,"Tips to kick start dopamine and relieve boredom? I can have real issues because of boredom. 

When I'm not living life in a rigid pattern ,bit more freedom , less repetition in very tedious boring ways . The effect is I'm more productive and more content 


When the result creates boredom it has a lasting impact. 

For example ,I sit in on a very boring and unnecessarily tedious seminar to the point everyone in the room is getting pissed off.

For me when I experience something this boring it seems to downregulate my dopamine levels so low that for the next few days I'm chronically bored and nothing seems to stimulate it . When I'm in this state it's like trying to look through a brick wall . There's is nothing in the future only the here and now and I am stumped with boredom .

This worries me as life can generally be pretty boring sometimes . Especially work, and life becomes the here and now persevere day to day ,trying to look through a brick wall, bored as fuck .

Usually I need a few kicks of dopamine here and there to elevate and come through boredom and the long-term plans come through . 

For me and boredom I live day to day because boredom restricts my wider view if this makes sense .

Anyone any tips to get out of a chronic stare of boredom 

I workout , I eat well, I live comfortably etc etc but when I'm that bored there's not much that really brings me back up to a level of content",4.896460674157304,6.515332382022475,5.3940280898876445,80.16789606741574,69.749063670412,7.886816479400749,33.20018726591761,8.395991825355821,2.6775319850187262,1114,53,203,17,20,357,135,267,0.147,0.8029999999999999,0.05,-0.9394,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,4,16,15,2,1,17,0,9,8,1,4,0,31,27,22,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,1,0,11,16,1,2,3,1,0,3,2,11,1,0,0,4,15,4,37,26,10,42,1,1,4,1,0,17,2,3,20,130,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100310468189215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328882075619393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915930097338021,0.0,0.1452242670420287,0.13155449093340174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004404601778846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052161282292417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3841004928436861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188561603082468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26569211305479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382063935191787,0.0,0.11651850597973368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110121012943135,0.12446660248706913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432637159949353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709560603809124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524058967392225,0.05819416141159725,0.0,0.3155453763637281,0.10541409385458687,0.200055225548722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951099239187047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756411702404865,0.08832315736013294,0.0,0.0,0.1266814363203322,0.0,0.0,0.2285904242890057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905932421700397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260331633736835,0.0,0.0,0.1211840044510323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558032017233726,0.07630889164538951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21687784032213886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917014747944056,0.11780897343026217,0.0,0.08431106362495795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617441696282671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118967218989078,0.1965666894542932,0.0,0.09454889984174944,0.0,0.0,0.10709977438685317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671801656359007,0.1209682891313888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trixiepixie5582,2020/02/08,"No one is actually there for you besides you People say they are there for you but they really aren't. Or maybe it's just the people in my life, but they aren't actually there for me. When push comes to shove no one is in sight and there's no one to turn to. The only time I've ever had someone there for 100% no bullshit, was when I was in long term relationships. 

It should not be this way but it is. The only people who have been there for me and loved me unconditionally have been partners. Otherwise it's all talk and never actually anyone being there. I tell people I'm depressed and they just brush it off. I'm moving out of state soon and all these people come out of the woodwork and act like they have been here for me this whole time, FUCK OFF. 

I honestly have come to hate everyone and everything. Even my doctor is a shit head. I called and said I had been extremely depressed for six months and I need an antidepressant. I told them the ones I have been on in the past and how I have been really struggling lately with wanting to live and I need something to help until I find a psychologist and psychiatrist. They said it would be sent over to the pharmacy but it never was. I'm pissed because MH is not something to fuck around with and it's just as detrimental as physical health. I'm sick of people not taking me seriously. 

I'm sick of people saying they are there and they aren't. I'm sick of doing this alone. I'm sick and tired of being sick and tired.",2.2333428571428584,4.290737420000003,3.6532380952380974,87.95400000000002,78.13333333333333,6.8190476190476215,20.38095238095238,7.83500028581142,0.7033952380952377,1166,29,247,19,28,383,134,300,0.22,0.705,0.075,-0.995,0,1,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,3,9,0,20,12,5,1,10,0,34,16,3,1,5,47,57,27,0,5,11,0,0,1,1,2,10,4,0,1,13,24,0,0,1,0,0,7,12,9,0,5,15,6,30,3,37,36,4,34,0,2,1,3,26,11,4,1,15,180,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.2825482402071401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995834093439394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748411995582264,0.0,0.0,0.0859170145235542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058833417069552314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985505438180122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24941216039359765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662529772464811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878512507612684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374591333898337,0.0873015162721163,0.0,0.09222228877459566,0.0867396436183501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821111563373832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844939043775734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528658703141553,0.0990501619175865,0.10258878504756926,0.0,0.0,0.06469061637648857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887084573553477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816997230623717,0.04715136717957051,0.0,0.08522272992021537,0.08541095059493034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710673295718263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696026106905643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770357401923662,0.1025780243052265,0.0,0.14312630415589006,0.14887352068957976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26159877326205483,0.1468049413182549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213256049261837,0.4683696395925628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365737324022265,0.0,0.0,0.10361882200810668,0.0,0.0,0.18361189127975536,0.15350199157200645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906918748347747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177513512260473,0.1486008150665599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008963223609994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256575009538982,0.07757347782359955,0.0843565988783771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255499005212216,0.22185494674460335,0.0,0.09222228877459566,0.0,0.0,0.10497840830877413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05692585642321747,0.07660751155655157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775329597381708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856005220539346,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,williburninheaven,2020/02/08,"Anyone have bipolar 2? I'm curious as to how it manifests for you. I was diagnosed 10 years ago, am medicated (low doses of seroquel, lamtrogine, lexapro, alongside valium and serapax (for when things are really bad) but it still lingers. I go into all consuming emotional vortexs (a day to 6 weeks) am constantly in a low with my own thoughts (which turn into depression, worry, panic) and I have no regard of the consequences of buying things = debt. I have a very good high paying job so i guess you'd say i am high functioning. If I am around people I am very positive, the life of the party so to speak but when alone it's a completely different story.

Although I have very good friends, most weekends are spent alone with my thoughts (by choice). Generally it is a low feeling. None of my friends would know all the above is going on for me - i keep it to myself) If I don't do high intensity exercise at least four times a week I unravel greatly. 

Does anyone relate? What is your experience?",4.650643231114437,6.0732363717277495,5.8553216155572185,77.38226439790577,70.09947643979058,9.855048616305162,31.44390426327599,10.125756701596842,3.342787284966344,781,34,146,21,14,261,124,191,0.121,0.7240000000000001,0.155,0.8479,3,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,3,0,0,7,11,0,1,10,0,19,6,0,1,2,23,30,13,0,3,4,0,1,0,2,1,6,2,0,0,9,7,0,1,4,2,4,2,3,6,0,1,4,3,20,5,22,24,6,25,0,4,0,0,7,12,0,4,11,100,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145620480076998,0.0,0.0,0.2677040221054381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18073299508118845,0.0,0.0,0.11504958035639415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790866967066884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355040085120457,0.1396608027453937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833480794343429,0.0,0.11131284863235692,0.13117426036957242,0.0,0.1350266259667108,0.0,0.0,0.11309739891497425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537581032490107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12641995874660386,0.0,0.0,0.06534682061886783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996985418332036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14689832743407802,0.21679808445178445,0.0,0.14248579748349507,0.14237067329368608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4096424108830592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824917489685367,0.1148730322837508,0.0,0.0,0.07102604737181893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128490730540287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019409621126393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516334219988934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959763721775825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279343141841454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277556670331288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320995697376062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17172050693189994,0.0,0.0,0.20520171459596367,0.07535995311478548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057427262088526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199056565669977,0.0,0.0,0.2073345054927792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124787340044788,0.0,0.09180725470017986,0.0,0.0,0.08322529540852097
mentalhealth,throwawaymental3444,2020/02/08,"Feeling very bad after seeing a psychiatrist. Not sure if she's good for me. I need some help :( Hi everyone. I'd like your input on a personal matter.

Long story short. I've always suspected I have OCD. Ever since elementary school I've dealt with major and minor obsessions. My most recent one has to do with overanalysing details about everyday life in the form of a doubt. Things that most of the time I find kind of uncomfortable talking about.

I should also point out that due to bad decisions and, I guess, some form of apathy I'm currently in my early 20s, still living with parents, never have had a relationship and no job. Quite a sheltered lifestyle.

I'm not a professional, though, so I can't self diagnose. Thus I decided to go a psychiatrist because I was more interested in a formal diagnosis. I have been to a couple of psychologists and they weren't that helpful and clear.

I went to this lady and she explained that I do indeed have compulsions but the bigger problem is my relationship with my parents. She said that my parents have been wrongly overprotective and my dad has been authoritarian. But she didn't just mention it. She was really really brutally honest about it. It involved straight up telling me the issue in a slightly angry and sarcastic manner. She joked about how instead of being out with friends I'm inside doing stuff with my parents. She criticised my parents' decisions in life in a sarcastic manner and was quite judgemental. At the end, she also kept asking me ""Will you see me again?"" to test whether I was willing to start therapy. Only when I left she was more sympathetic, didn't take a lot of money and said that she really wants to see me again.

I feel like shit now. I've started having doubts about my parents to the point where I feel like I should be avoiding them. I also feel like a loser and I'm getting even more obsessions and compulsions. I've had minor stomach ache ever since I saw her a couple days ago. It's a big mess. Do you think that maybe she's not good for me? Was what she did wrong? I really don't know if I should see her again or not (already booked a second appointment but still). I'm not asking you to tell me what to do. Just share your opinion on the problem.

Thanks in advance :(",3.592697034148649,5.832073702764982,4.900230414746545,79.75093170270591,74.64516129032259,7.953586198747487,26.565993146638302,8.768130331264683,2.2183547914451145,1793,67,327,38,39,594,214,434,0.16699999999999998,0.722,0.11,-0.9764,8,1,0,0,0,0,50.0,0,5,2,4,25,29,2,5,23,0,38,5,2,2,5,72,70,26,0,9,14,7,4,4,1,5,3,2,0,2,16,20,0,2,12,2,1,3,12,15,0,2,20,11,57,14,45,43,11,47,0,1,5,0,47,21,1,12,27,237,73,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797166310455226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461762661453702,0.1839614696916049,0.06380340493689289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14336977940541026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280481951653334,0.04674305161050852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16968859920044133,0.0,0.049451870617238325,0.0,0.0,0.07782797871447039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791519032177726,0.0,0.0,0.05064602169274912,0.13872181777097767,0.0,0.07327045442106507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508563798582795,0.16433933985130714,0.0,0.0,0.07008358405927519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059242315601081716,0.0,0.040061822602650655,0.0,0.043578671107120326,0.1286300883611869,0.0,0.0,0.08447100596906486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027931733568037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003337352070143,0.07609247443743185,0.0,0.0,0.07984979720601912,0.04214099387679215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331239439112235,0.0,0.10832185830819116,0.1498467299273238,0.0,0.06770931660045712,0.06785885761219143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519008530906567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770347654966452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0568568048161393,0.05913988178524888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05195994712230554,0.05831814035724407,0.0,0.0,0.5108604076647563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695349596887896,0.0,0.0,0.1449736393036506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14674366344149453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16311596488698055,0.0,0.0,0.1964911530654232,0.0,0.07571165858238488,0.16464996208597346,0.0,0.0,0.14587934099164152,0.0,0.0,0.07760364831575113,0.2444142220011789,0.0,0.0799933392090761,0.0,0.0787103040110155,0.12685998706527127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854815048831316,0.0,0.12247253861914695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777956964800505,0.0,0.0,0.07226942871095264,0.0,0.057653367266669975,0.0616319985838746,0.13404235386829455,0.07059609095331514,0.08768957860761288,0.0,0.05094238732766694,0.04913306447987178,0.07533712292287202,0.0,0.044712375815320414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326853698225059,0.045227497862603765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108257366491423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676737770170066,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonsweet,2020/02/08,"If I’m offered coke while drunk I can’t say no, and it’s a really bad habit. I don’t like to do drugs cos of my fragile mental health but Once I’m drunk and people are around me doing coke, then offer me some... I can’t resist. Then ends up being quite a lot as I have generous friends. I don’t seek it when I’m sober nor when I’m not around people doing drugs. I know I enjoy it but the comedown is awful, had a panic attack and will feel shit for a week. The guilt is the worst part. Total fear that my brain is going to go completely wrong as punishment for putting bad things into my system. Awful shit.
I just need some reassurance really.",0.721397288842546,2.7208257956204385,2.8687643378519314,91.924397810219,83.01459854014598,5.666110531803963,16.355057351407712,6.868970318607317,-0.1887555787278412,502,9,111,6,14,170,86,137,0.366,0.5329999999999999,0.10099999999999999,-0.9938,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,5,15,4,3,7,2,15,10,3,1,1,19,24,14,0,2,5,0,2,1,1,1,3,1,0,0,5,6,4,0,2,2,0,3,7,11,0,0,1,3,13,4,11,21,6,15,0,0,0,0,5,4,2,4,8,72,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827550217718832,0.0,0.1806730602693635,0.0,0.0,0.2652049503143551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772881699146498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16651272763582708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3683460253762618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14066144900848368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17870911966379202,0.08030077827999832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269876467377006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805145209709036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16881111564766993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727963852096443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758815833724332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350173917957723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004645708791146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775805255847513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16913098559492093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18633319394049996,0.0,0.17197933192795822,0.0,0.2202022969900256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596512349926928,0.0,0.16891749746052404,0.0,0.0,0.20347973830729088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12629471359561448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32603914858021343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550850234698322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739045295312806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17363741693273912,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jocelynn1007,2020/02/08,"Depressed I feel so depressed at night and I couldn’t snap out of it. 
Dear friend, anyone’s there?",-0.5609999999999999,1.2131589000000034,-0.06999999999999673,104.47000000000004,110.0,2.0,15.0,3.1291,-1.5215,78,2,17,0,4,23,18,20,0.27899999999999997,0.486,0.235,-0.2716,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,2,3,1,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069403901834847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7561742486766768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22195812788910246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33914974032174594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4119467752221526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunflowercactusbreed,2020/02/08,I know it's not much I studied and I turned down social plans to look after myself!,0.33999999999999986,2.4711741111111145,2.342222222222226,94.30000000000004,85.66666666666667,3.6,14.555555555555555,3.1291,-1.1929777777777772,66,1,14,0,2,22,16,18,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,3,3,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,11,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28305074200111674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4325011754236345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3786112902970422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5250151316985945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5602121143432263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Onionboys_babycarrot,2020/02/08,How can I be less of a narcissist My therapist says it’s normal for teenagers to be narcissistic but I still want to work on my personality flaws how can I combat my inner narcissism,3.9333333333333336,5.9063101111111145,6.1344444444444415,72.45500000000001,72.8888888888889,10.355555555555558,28.66666666666667,10.504223727775694,3.4372333333333334,148,6,28,5,3,52,28,36,0.092,0.8640000000000001,0.043,-0.3919,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,0,5,5,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,5,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,22,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4289005146221384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38222504077992703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34811511823642594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3495864584119969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5082596619640447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581953632853329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3186860676370936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,melassasin,2020/02/08,I feel guilty when I hear somebody talking loud I feel like I have done something seriously wrong when people (my parents especially) Are loud and irritated. I try to think I have not done something wrong but that doesn’t work and sometimes I panic and go somewhere else. Still feeling so guilty. When I say that I forgot something or I broke something I think that I have just done something seriously wrong and that my life is in risk. Do I have a disorder? Or is it just me.,3.7231521739130433,5.84881870652174,4.286304347826088,84.81467391304348,73.89130434782608,6.773913043478261,28.89130434782609,7.645422480735847,1.7604086956521736,379,16,73,5,8,120,52,92,0.336,0.629,0.035,-0.9819,1,0,5,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,2,1,0,12,1,0,0,0,16,20,11,0,0,6,1,3,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,5,4,0,1,5,0,0,1,2,8,0,0,4,7,16,1,2,16,0,6,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,2,5,51,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608445287029232,0.0,0.0,0.4308569484961322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172380519927327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128839757817612,0.10026062589036078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975980999966233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15817606452086047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912797497007687,0.0685641989787595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16466154706434985,0.15583360703960478,0.0,0.0,0.09729573706840244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160589526170746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5402121116566456,0.13880220454806938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120776077180955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280189074297195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17985146348234704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528326520258686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217092571634602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4603270908810621,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elspencico,2020/02/08,"Irregular I just moved to Montana a month or so ago. I stopped going to collage after a semester, (it just wasn't for me) so I went back to my parents who just moved. I usually am very happy and optimistic, but for the past couple of weeks I've felt angry all the time, pessimistic, and like I'm not worth anything. But I have plans for the future, and I am looking for a job, so I don't think I'm completely demotivated. Despite this I find it impossible to do anything creative like I used to (making videos, learning code, modding controllers, making games, etc). Any advice? (I'm open to explain further)",4.085301318267419,5.611430788135596,5.4233333333333364,79.53230696798495,71.62711864406779,7.617325800376648,31.75517890772128,8.167268648758528,2.44455065913371,475,22,88,7,9,159,77,118,0.09699999999999999,0.778,0.125,0.5172,2,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,7,3,0,0,6,0,6,0,0,4,1,22,18,9,0,0,7,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,5,2,1,4,3,0,0,0,3,2,11,3,12,15,2,16,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,12,55,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17590352032447315,0.15956785113125746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241285567184552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29626550081824354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384164461982688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18873687956840224,0.0,0.2018963283709772,0.0,0.19917745056670694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20075854139325527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17283766395321545,0.0,0.16452572141296376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023037334399619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19162380891188385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17863197807246178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17588741838470312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116291867865084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403159156482813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368212711826425,0.3826439180297373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19987961099249094,0.0,0.17183974912651453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504962763077699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534302914564973,0.0,0.0,0.1049651781632816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554706948865275,0.19825539367267986,0.14852696005021074,0.0,0.0,0.14439302579778027,0.0,0.0,0.16687091376803512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zero87X,2020/02/08,"I don't know what to do at the moment I'm about 14, and I'm in 8th Grade. I've been feeling horrible since this year started, which was awful since I had the best times of my life last summer. Every moment I spend in school feels useless, and like it's a waste of my time. Every time I go there I'm overwhelmed by this horrible feeling of discomfort and irritability. I have some friends, but I don't talk to them much outside of school. I can't even enjoy being outside of school anymore. knowing that I'll have to go back makes it impossible for me to enjoy normal things. I'm going to a therapist at the moment, but it's not doing much. I'm stressed out all the time, anxious, and hate half my classes. I have barely any intrests in anything and all I ever do outside of school is sleep all day, and even that I feel no joy from. I have no idea what to do, or where to go from here.",2.736082949308756,3.8477711182795717,4.182826420890937,88.73709677419356,74.3763440860215,6.604608294930878,25.1136712749616,6.868970318607317,0.8499735791090628,692,22,151,6,14,230,102,186,0.193,0.728,0.079,-0.9676,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,1,8,11,1,3,6,1,16,2,1,1,4,25,34,9,0,1,4,0,4,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,11,7,0,0,7,0,1,4,6,5,0,1,3,4,16,6,24,30,7,25,0,2,0,0,3,7,0,2,15,100,27,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821756859131669,0.0,0.0,0.14655252481676234,0.128652517047035,0.0,0.0,0.10675276708574216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975065339048783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13613856949213235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366200704643144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17136451142681258,0.11734384919105255,0.2185981126658059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262371788488984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022534968650704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949032296438234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12807675486062295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464439342408223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258712896635412,0.10574333316258136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916287287007439,0.06337716864189971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865925627497769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907258624232439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710312985901387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5251552178863753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146200133441512,0.0,0.12981886262623055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182014772829143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14859975156278307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042681830930044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506209286636747,0.08618364309324326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025751749192723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353876055889126
mentalhealth,dusty-af,2020/02/08,Is being sensitive a weakness? Let’s exclude people who just whine to others about their sensitivity to a certain topic. I suppose i’m talking about those who suffer in silence while watching the cruelty of the world.,6.5669230769230795,8.75949441025641,7.331282051282053,65.65538461538463,66.43589743589743,8.276923076923078,38.641025641025635,8.841846274778883,4.100394871794872,178,10,24,3,3,59,33,39,0.327,0.626,0.047,-0.91,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,3,1,0,0,1,2,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,1,6,2,0,3,0,2,1,0,4,2,0,0,1,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6937954705371989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4703751133349258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5453394335798782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bertos97,2020/02/08,"Ever had the feeling... ever had this feeling where everytime you get out of a phase, its just so another one way worst is waiting for you? like what doesnt kill you makes you stronger to face something bigger... im kinda done.",4.850378787878785,5.834918431818185,5.148181818181818,84.2756060606061,69.22727272727272,7.684848484848485,30.57575757575757,7.793537801064563,1.993403030303031,177,7,34,2,3,56,38,44,0.081,0.7120000000000001,0.207,0.6556,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,4,0,0,5,3,1,0,2,0,5,1,1,1,2,9,10,1,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,3,2,4,1,4,7,1,6,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,3,25,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3095859030401763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30213402116283344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5341247264298944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29856541419873217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425122292767754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189109147698412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32664039336750605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442398263569878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197075642261762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20006292440481208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.227290925415566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343485422697469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hayleybts,2020/02/08,For few minutes I was like how am I? Like I had a panic attack or something? I suffer from dpdr. I thought this is it. I'm going crazy. My time is over. It's so hard somedays.,-2.7027472527472507,-1.210307282051282,0.8033699633699634,99.22615384615385,109.0,2.2285714285714286,15.827838827838828,3.1291,-1.2124315018315015,132,4,31,0,7,47,31,39,0.326,0.561,0.11199999999999999,-0.86,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,1,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,3,8,3,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,1,6,2,3,5,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,22,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4527473946514022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22617505605007165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35650221593456355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3888552780432864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4669310851759614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30637611757948424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159430751254842,0.23205902909025655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AiminLuvWiddaCoco,2020/02/08,"I love him soo much and I don't know what to do. It's driving me crazy Love doesn't see age, race, gender, financial status, sexuality...I am a 29M about to begin transitioning to become a woman and I fell in love with a guy who for the most part does love me but it feels like he is repressing himself from me and he doesn't know why he really wants because lately his shit keeps changing up...I love him and soo much and if giving the chance I would be all in...I'm already trying hard on the friendship scale...he is straight but... bicurious? I guess and I'm also very girly and plus the rainbow view on spectrums of sexuality is a lot different than the ""conventional"" view of it...I don't know if he's more afraid of losing me as a friend forever or having to deal with a new label....I'm willing to give him all the time in the world...but I just don't know...every moment with him is when my restless heart goes still and calm...and since he's come into my life, I've been fighting for myself, and being more of a better person than I used to be...I don't know what to do...All I do is talk about him, think about him or talk to him from the time I wake up til the time when I go to sleep...he told me loves me once, I feel like he's soo broken but I am too and we could fix each other.",0.9435740072202136,2.543493797833936,3.044557400722024,92.96930541516248,80.33574007220216,5.87604332129964,18.661227436823104,6.742157984588678,-0.11477057039711225,990,21,235,10,25,336,143,277,0.09,0.741,0.16899999999999998,0.9731,2,0,0,0,2,0,53.0,1,0,0,2,9,16,2,3,16,0,22,10,3,1,2,44,47,23,0,5,8,0,3,2,1,2,1,0,0,3,6,18,0,2,7,0,0,4,6,6,0,0,2,6,31,10,34,40,10,23,1,1,3,6,34,7,1,7,14,142,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190655506407928,0.0862841252737189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577219666050124,0.11916228637931026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542494870029107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413930837847452,0.09294256269094524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861459099056531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123569416321973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272800675080892,0.0,0.0,0.0944202245824414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090675227037802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911058145944838,0.1541613709751478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335992405471956,0.0,0.0,0.20700670914585115,0.0613195935546588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188592405776664,0.10683367286454372,0.0,0.0,0.09665332404119337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785688393727945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590262561963944,0.0,0.0,0.2964831821239323,0.0,0.12171101107126588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620989988676301,0.10542474496356204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070765182853765,0.0,0.09172903701261097,0.5842803076089128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863145857412672,0.0,0.0,0.10420630675062632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490536316301188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168404921321977,0.0,0.0,0.09421033399075668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912072659031444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597887665763197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110753350845765,0.08925241003873446,0.0,0.1079735871537651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616561839704985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734448989430981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913518626106788,0.0,0.0,0.1887444918950704,0.0,0.0,0.103098932815571,0.0,0.07325407488819399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093187213208568,0.0,0.08902522435833561,0.06363965940154441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735905664276966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664598558632868,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigPlunk,2020/02/08,"Take care of yourself before you take care of others... For real. Canadian here. 

This week, I suffered a major mental health event.  All the years of putting the care of others ahead of taking care of myself finally caught up with me.  The culmination of sleep deprivation, poor nutrition, too much THC, and massive amounts of stress resulted in a full-blown manic episode.  I was hospitalized against my wishes for 2 days.  But you know what?  The most amazing things are coming out of this (aside from the awareness that I need to put my mental health ahead of EVERYTHING else).  This event is reuniting my estranged family and giving me a forum to talk to others about taking care of their mental health.  What happened to me could absolutely happen to anyone under the right circumstances.  Be well my friends and talk to others and ask them if they are putting their mental health first.",5.72268257059396,8.075272056962032,5.206962025316456,79.3785929892892,68.9367088607595,7.899513145082762,27.343719571567675,8.617729084823388,2.1754142161635834,707,24,117,12,13,215,100,158,0.067,0.768,0.165,0.9468,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,4,3,4,11,0,1,9,0,6,5,1,1,1,17,24,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,11,7,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,3,1,1,2,0,17,8,29,20,5,19,0,2,0,0,11,5,0,2,9,85,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881441380128478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200521798240316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374435150267327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5017058642891851,0.0,0.0,0.08477624871171177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857677765936891,0.0,0.0,0.06346986310010205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822135313192819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884495157206848,0.0,0.09277738533209874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780938215724173,0.0,0.08371218366746934,0.0,0.0,0.07603557992855725,0.0,0.0,0.09440912619279088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17405702330577666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41844434573680017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0540865912427158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3967187514086449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234672466639405,0.07297385463779885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2968043143202441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201839779867527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404630894838347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848658584206488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273463572496638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29598486625497866,0.15820532019836706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653828926858088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894298686222513,0.0,0.0884873639195218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317298108369787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337636262159449
mentalhealth,0atmeals,2020/02/08,"How Long do withdrawal symptoms take to subside? Was on lexapro for Anxiety and Depression. Am off it for 1.5 months now, and it feels really horrible. I can’t sleep well (my schedule is messed up, I sleep in the day and am up all night till 9am), I feel so scared all the time like something bad is about to happen, I feel so breathless and dizzy all the time and I keep thinking about negative things. Though I understand it may be correlational and not causal, I feel that this is one of the factors that is messing me up, and on the other hand I really really don’t want to take meds anymore and be reliant on them. So for those with experience with meds, how Long did it take to go off them? And yes, I know the time Taken for all this to be over matters and you all will be thinking I’m crazy for wanting to not be on them, but I am very willing to hold it off till I feel much better.",4.001557971014492,4.446854880434781,4.947608695652175,86.90101449275366,70.84782608695652,8.52463768115942,27.833333333333336,8.59863814320734,1.7121572463768109,694,23,155,11,12,227,98,184,0.099,0.815,0.086,-0.5481,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,3,1,10,8,0,1,6,1,20,4,3,2,5,37,39,19,0,2,3,0,6,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,12,12,0,2,9,0,0,1,5,5,1,1,3,6,17,3,31,28,6,25,0,1,0,0,4,12,0,1,13,115,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080665262561114,0.0,0.14009586818755085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794948800520436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493647386482537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911035538247398,0.0,0.12167042318895388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13818323822644674,0.0,0.0,0.357136458928028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028355164858449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491923423800733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255618791782454,0.0,0.0,0.07763496619972285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901442480841373,0.0,0.0,0.2500282804186825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.313824779880227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127555279323924,0.0,0.10384524879616236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256663675156466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572410063164474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714918887184757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14142984607949094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827319151492857,0.0,0.0,0.1087518813486662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14682732104318075,0.31863870359591384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384948370889414,0.1810324555389443,0.13879110228870462,0.0,0.2471164155701168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470607418644531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11655754357582887,0.16664226183782455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270132457815012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mhul108,2020/02/08,"I think I may have bipolar disorder I am a 19 yo male, I must first say that I really hope that it's not the case. However, I have a history with depression, and suicidal thoughts, but at the same time, many times after feeling pretty bad for a period of several hours, I suddenly feel ok, not really euphoric, but kind of happy and relax.
In my research I've seen than often people in the manic state are deliriously happy, which it's not my case. Could it be what I'm describing some form of this disorder?",5.593498349834981,5.669858069306932,7.2146039603960395,73.31946369636964,67.31683168316832,11.881848184818482,31.684818481848183,11.538034831475384,3.89577095709571,399,15,76,13,6,139,72,101,0.17,0.626,0.203,0.5981,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,1,8,0,0,6,1,8,1,0,0,1,19,15,4,1,3,5,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,8,3,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,4,9,6,10,9,3,11,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,4,7,53,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626842366337518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556481815812076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16781641236566555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4466097172065526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970350975740527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657317978385736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4148240924662896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19352124293300668,0.19187930256781016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028970933490828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19753836266937685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13507833299626745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19822351436773003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24964048263593366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154945517026186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201150603370373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21312461362671964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248463530167561,0.0,0.15468212330327416,0.22722690368902984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Blueberrybuttons,2020/02/08,"I just need to talk and have someone listen Sorry if this post doesn’t have a great structure, I’m just going to write about how I feel because I really need to let it out. I want to say that this goes into detail about my emotional struggles, mentions self harm and suicidal ideation. So if you’re sensitive to that please don’t read this, I don’t want to hurt anyone else. 

I’m in pain. So, so much pain. I don’t remember a time when I wasn’t experiencing anxiety or depression. Even when I was a kid, around 8 years old, I was hospitalised because of severe stomach cramps and suspected ulcers. The diagnosis was stress. I was literally stressing myself into a hospital bed as a child. I feel my anxiety every day, emotionally and physically. My resting heart rate is around 95-100bpm and I’m physically fit. I feel it sometimes as if it’s about to burst out of my chest, then bam, full blown panic attack that can leave me shaking for an hour. I feel nauseous every time I eat. I struggle to sleep and when I do, I have nightmares all the time that sometimes leave me waking up in pools of sweat, in tears or even gasping for breath. 

Then it’s the depression. I can wake up fine, then it might hit around 4pm, 6pm, anytime, and all of a sudden that’s it. My interest in the things I like is gone, I just blankly stare at whatever is happening around me and count down the time until I can try to go to sleep. This doesn’t happen everyday, but maybe 4/7 days a week, or I’ll wake up feeling bad and it’ll be the reverse. My mood just changes with no warning, I’ll just feel this sinking deep down inside me and I know it’s done. Sometimes I just feel my eyes well up with tears when I’m sat in a room alone. I always let it go dark around me accidentally because I don’t even notice it until I have a random moment like having to go to the bathroom. It’s like nothing matters. Nothing that I do, say, or am matters. I’m so lost. I have had this happen on and off for as long as I can remember. I take everything so personally, people can upset me so easily and I find it hard to trust anyone, especially with these sorts of emotions. Only one person knows a little bit about it and I hate it because I think they’ll probably not want to stick around knowing how difficult I might be to care for if they knew the full extent. I don’t show what I’m feeling though, I try to hide it. I’d just be a burden to everyone around me. 

At other periods in my life, fuck sometimes even all in the same day, I get so excited and feel ready to take on the world. I sign up for tonnes of shit, commit to learning a language, taking up a hobby or anything, and then it’s just gone again. No motivation, no more belief in myself. I go from believing I could take on anything to barely being able to motivate myself to get a fucking shower. I can’t concentrate on anything, I never have had a good attention span and I get bored so quickly so I just start tapping or looking around the room whenever I try to do something. 

I’m in so much pain. Even if it goes away for a while it comes back and it hurts so much. I haven’t self harmed in over 6 years but the closest I’ve come is this week. To anyone reading this, I just want to say thank you for letting me tell you how I’m feeling. No body knows how much I’m hurting. Everyone thinks I’m okay but I’m a mess. I’m sorry to anyone who relates to what I’m saying, because I know what it’s like. I feel like my own mind is torturing me. What’s wrong with me? I just want it to stop",2.7102074020668105,4.031025368493154,4.324462869502527,86.86902787791401,74.76712328767123,7.369382360009612,25.409757269887045,7.974163086874047,1.3448127853881275,2749,92,590,41,57,923,302,730,0.187,0.7140000000000001,0.099,-0.9959,1,1,1,0,0,0,78.0,0,2,2,3,52,46,6,7,30,1,50,22,13,6,5,117,119,62,1,13,26,0,12,5,0,4,6,5,4,6,43,35,1,1,28,4,0,10,16,30,1,1,13,21,76,15,95,93,15,95,1,6,3,2,20,49,3,15,40,388,119,5,0.05129621196292687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053127405465492085,0.0,0.0,0.04268255760701892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848292349546533,0.0,0.0,0.14347001640325424,0.05255903106189465,0.12663723517491318,0.3653160326038868,0.0,0.058356846469428514,0.048194479707210434,0.039443620673290575,0.04283019434483883,0.15634847349187148,0.0,0.0,0.05779326495481148,0.0,0.0,0.05600217786109718,0.05697852758760308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05229990680951957,0.0,0.05426459062179805,0.08837428905809097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04095585124164077,0.0,0.0,0.09924543925905607,0.0,0.08836270439718642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052493834502468584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052488830951429685,0.04285140290887218,0.1731040025307546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694033210770808,0.0,0.08643854193249327,0.09803145756289357,0.04610172771343735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853059665188894,0.03664602407578274,0.0,0.0,0.046883808424880574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484504276715687,0.08040046073267199,0.0,0.14576409690099956,0.043024828862210714,0.0,0.05655425478066331,0.0,0.0,0.13608321249142405,0.0,0.04595133031593237,0.0506443894258258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06078625815769944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05051643594845021,0.0,0.16474096751941128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409552829149376,0.0,0.0,0.10863056376087224,0.0,0.15736155647035044,0.03623203151862904,0.1253036904666852,0.051412280385263326,0.0,0.04539553338953673,0.0430758987677488,0.0,0.05599587490203882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05153393959626308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883434923901343,0.05179455117627518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083447204218553,0.07607098239713715,0.03956280097696773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844019768983092,0.058401077308795936,0.053826745503458916,0.0,0.034759640782479284,0.039013080693644606,0.16374835854122394,0.06018505235220095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035562334579665705,0.0895797473977931,0.0,0.05630783677194527,0.0,0.0,0.04912759147782513,0.0,0.0553059924488544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026201868927778,0.0,0.03286166689802729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621721711018485,0.0,0.0,0.16317122652844038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702627273093826,0.05795011863187063,0.05265482443357113,0.0,0.0,0.10266651494746697,0.0,0.04346311393368832,0.03949033007523275,0.20293306108831308,0.1148438192195351,0.036307722847513664,0.0,0.0,0.042885930093331984,0.1175192749834472,0.10725187669067053,0.0,0.05610973017534068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15427347001510014,0.041229952109826086,0.04483515022766207,0.04722666011203568,0.0,0.0,0.03407892390543791,0.06573708275117107,0.050398267808481986,0.0,0.11964493483516775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448028225312206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15127917427379212,0.0,0.0822934541937046,0.0,0.04612145498207202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056084355167200485,0.0,0.06606615738350584
mentalhealth,Cassakane,2020/02/08,"Missing Fire Alarm My adult  stepson moved out of our house a couple of weeks ago. A few days prior to that we were with him in an emergency room and he responded to the questions about wanting to hurt himself and others with a yes. This was a big shock to my husband and I, since we'd never heard anything about this. We also weren't sure if we could believe it. He's a pathological liar (I believe) and was definitely thrilled to be in an emergency room feeling like he was the center of attention. 

He said that he has lots (not sure if he used the word ""constant"") intrusive thoughts of hurting people. When the nurse walked away my husband questioned him hard, but he didn't back down. He maintained that he has intrusive thoughts of harming others, wouldn't specify who those people are (even though he never leaves the house, so he basically only sees his parents, younger brother and boyfriend), and claimed that he has complete and absolute control over himself and so would never actually hurt anyone. Although, any other time you talk to him, he will happily tell you that he is very impulsive and doesn't make short or long term plans. 

He's been seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist since October. So, he is under treatment. I don't know what his diagnosis is. He won't tell us anything beyond depression and anxiety. In the weeks before and after he started therapy, he was talking a lot about sociopaths and their symptoms. I also found out that he told his boyfriend that he was diagnosed with antisocial personality disorder as a child (obvious lie). I don't know if he's a sociopath. In my opinion he certainly has narcissistic personality disorder. He meets all of the 9 criteria. 

So, he has thoughts of hurting people. He moved out a couple of weeks ago under tense circumstances. He just packed a bag and left. My husband and daughter packed up the things in his room. At that time, my daughter found lighter fluid in his room. The kind you use to light a charcoal grill. My husband said that my son had wanted to do some trick he'd seen online and needed the lighter fluid. I'd been worried about him huffing it. 

Today our toaster oven malfunctioned and filled our kitchen with smoke. The first thing I noticed was that our fire alarm was missing. I questioned every adult in the house and no one removed that fire alarm. It had to have been my son. There's no reason for him to have removed that alarm. He doesn't cook and even if he was to cook something, burn it, and make the fire alarm go off, the standard practice in our home is to wave a dishtowel at it until it turns off. 

He's admitted to having a problem with thoughts of hurting people and the fire alarm is missing? He had lighter fluid in his bedroom? There's no telling what he could have been planning. 

My husband isn't taking this seriously and that's making me feel like I'm jumping to conclusions. I just can't think of any legit reason for that fire alarm to be gone. I'm not even sure what I'm looking for here. Just opinions. I'm not thinking of calling the authorities or anything. Should I assume that my son had plans to set the house and fire and harm us? Should I just ignore this? I just don't know what to do. 

And there's no talking to him. He isn't communicating with us right now and even if he was, he'd just lie. The thought that he was planning to harm our home and/or kill us is just piling sadness on top of sadness.",4.5737727272727255,6.180939740909093,4.915878787878789,83.32881818181819,70.53030303030303,7.6436363636363645,30.92727272727273,8.174460898885233,2.2181309090909083,2719,117,516,39,50,859,272,660,0.21,0.7509999999999999,0.039,-0.9989,2,0,2,0,0,0,73.0,14,3,1,8,30,36,3,7,35,1,60,6,0,8,9,112,103,45,1,15,18,12,10,2,0,6,3,3,10,5,37,38,3,2,23,2,0,9,22,28,0,2,34,18,57,8,71,56,6,67,0,11,4,0,104,34,0,16,25,334,94,0,0.0,0.0,0.05968160137841445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084261454302284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978164142492719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317937477698542,0.0,0.04678587155929299,0.0,0.0,0.042763250023682836,0.0,0.15098401424508098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574601617020238,0.04702689676845875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052041141434719836,0.13780874364723314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062449381395481125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412323098622723,0.06609030989196672,0.06859414508181141,0.09765972573147733,0.13534081626381875,0.0,0.03944199296031658,0.0,0.05267548600935341,0.062074306800878686,0.0,0.0,0.14018523920708145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16157771232031976,0.0,0.05152843880567034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06184686812990811,0.08738289040251633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05202115141949543,0.0,0.13411366494354604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03475762630560285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054785753190350416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269336411508655,0.0,0.0,0.28227350244289817,0.32735570166683753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766251003558882,0.06368687574347608,0.10083287627443864,0.0,0.0,0.06475772533911038,0.0664485859092316,0.0,0.0,0.05975763498074552,0.0,0.0,0.05412310092274219,0.05135750242956858,0.0,0.0,0.10398906467033857,0.0,0.0,0.12247076197312505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000302006372494,0.0,0.04534804583352882,0.141506970632247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962903980128976,0.0,0.0,0.04144239324087368,0.04651358285782134,0.0,0.0,0.06790896667581925,0.0,0.0,0.16959763922035626,0.10680199894208108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05852015776338412,0.0,0.0,0.20553361223346392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576167385954826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222878645026418,0.11635094625606035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747036768525498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118142457143137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04708258633715847,0.0,0.0,0.04328810350323738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17292269814379052,0.06356680853644864,0.04598337085104861,0.1474699838813405,0.16036494206392835,0.0,0.06993975554342226,0.07100940818610693,0.08126160880390046,0.07837543693072566,0.060087641476167186,0.24276397961018895,0.07132370080787788,0.0,0.05797084233073315,0.058439300908213775,0.0,0.0,0.06652258226876433,0.0,0.0,0.2942632379183188,0.10564213313895528,0.0,0.05046193721524414,0.07214540643434092,0.0,0.14717230729687394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062109141972430136,0.0,0.04344504538275488,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jakejr98,2020/02/08,Is my friend okay? He put cheese on a crumpet. That says it all really....,-2.5989999999999998,-2.523281733333331,0.03250000000000064,101.50875,133.0,4.166666666666667,10.416666666666668,5.985473137389443,-0.9273333333333332,54,1,13,1,4,18,15,15,0.0,0.7020000000000001,0.298,0.6249,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4745764500688359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6175018677114253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3935112636364359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4884849248484733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nomnom_lost_,2020/02/08,"I don't even know, Going insane? This is my 3rd or 4th attempt at writing a post.
Some with my history some without.

I will just ask a question, and I guess leave a bit of an explanation.. However please be warned It may sound a bit nuts.. 

Does anybody else go through what feels like routined phazes of losing there mind? 

Briefly what I mean.. I have been playing with the idea of just packing some supplies and ditching my life with no warning to anyone.. I am questioning my relationship, but I will be happy with it again soon ( I will just be happyily content again) and not even want to remeber this 'episode' I have no outlets, (job or anything creative. Things I want to do I have no idea how to do them, I have past trauma that There is no help for me, I am on my own to deal with it.. I'm too old for some help and too young (mid twentys) to be feeling this way and to be so lost. I feel like I am not who I am meant to be, that I am a lost resource to society also and That I fake my life that I have to fit in with what is normalish or accepted, I feel suicidal ish I guess but I know I want to just live my life more but I also have no intrest in trying?? Maybe thats just no motivation left.. As I always keep trying.. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me.
I have had deppression and anxiety, and I am on the Spectrum apprently.. I don't believe the diagnosis all that much.. I know I sound depressed,  but it feels different from depression,  More dangerous and possibly more destructive.

My heart rate has been elevated all day.
My sleep was perfectly good which is unusual.
I fequently have mini existential crisis's as well, these are becoming more common I think..

I do feel like my energy is starting to drain, which could mean I'm calming down. I felt like curling up and sleeping the day away earlyier, sometimes that helps but this keeps recurring ?

Almost like it has a schedule to come back.

Any ideas.. Anyone feel like this at all?",2.197193347193348,4.308540000000004,3.679272349272349,87.4578898128898,78.48717948717949,7.293139293139294,25.92515592515593,8.27314431278463,1.7216860706860713,1520,60,316,30,37,501,194,390,0.18899999999999997,0.655,0.156,-0.9295,4,0,0,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,1,6,20,24,3,0,12,0,44,6,3,2,4,78,76,24,1,4,16,0,8,6,0,4,3,2,0,0,26,18,0,2,23,1,0,3,12,11,1,0,8,10,48,13,39,57,15,30,1,5,0,0,11,12,1,13,19,228,74,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416502541725861,0.0,0.0,0.13443125251181628,0.06993724002013017,0.0,0.0,0.057157623391940915,0.0,0.06429885374396185,0.0,0.0,0.11754095273845992,0.0,0.06916688540127178,0.0,0.07857642302810293,0.0,0.07896876578863199,0.0646300999975048,0.0,0.0,0.09282782527681056,0.0,0.09469679581775947,0.0,0.0,0.1835240423398388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724025715887243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710795601537127,0.0,0.0,0.10841199927254676,0.08665298305421677,0.14478616120317955,0.0,0.0,0.08781549962173345,0.0,0.0,0.0735536752142907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021390044218608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110299043975444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974912956742839,0.2401844617811776,0.08070222731069622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553634273880827,0.07049806646232078,0.0,0.0,0.185183503138854,0.0,0.0,0.08947394816175175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996009462657301,0.16901302159178447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28465034941560324,0.0,0.0,0.08340773746667457,0.14941694130086722,0.0,0.0,0.18476912361420894,0.0,0.0,0.08899796822410705,0.0913217551468722,0.0,0.17810331152591827,0.2463787017524621,0.0,0.07421865230184625,0.0,0.0,0.09403167020349372,0.1835033869908993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444061707619085,0.183112554725793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486764056412575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06178722214615617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819747997385279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08023627592406485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226285668238078,0.0,0.09475497499579796,0.08049771029256578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883129134503666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023941535018043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682235812581796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312867712863578,0.0,0.05949179406609316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193825034730896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055839809384113114,0.05385654459745614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141303456177446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872653160072305,0.06671584293589597,0.0,0.0,0.07557202398359478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102225132926365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189667228511426,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heyyieyimen99,2020/02/08,I need an explanation I’ve always found myself feeling really depressed whenever I either eat a lot of food alone and having to finish it since no one would if ever there were some left over and seeing people eat a ton of food alone or without sharing any. I know it sounds weird and I guess the reason why it’s sorta significant is that sudden feeling of immense sadness I feel because of this like I don’t understand why something so random could trigger it. If anyone who’s got some insights or any ideas about this feel free to share.,6.832857142857144,6.867877,7.080714285714286,75.46678571428575,64.71428571428571,8.904761904761905,31.785714285714285,8.344100000000001,2.4584285714285707,435,15,76,5,6,141,77,105,0.153,0.73,0.11800000000000001,-0.5917,0,2,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,4,0,6,4,0,2,1,30,17,8,0,5,6,0,4,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,8,3,4,0,10,0,1,0,3,3,0,1,3,6,7,5,9,12,5,5,0,2,1,0,3,2,0,10,4,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217926339757615,0.0,0.0,0.12926410123778828,0.0,0.0,0.21128740037555385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862471560213917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470025246333162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403477200036998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133803199798931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31792478887642944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14052346511893632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3141996203643877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37570099982313626,0.1703338579830262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12424802519045768,0.0,0.17113614356542456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17537185994013849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537659869623804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878882551155944,0.0,0.0,0.07589643094532149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207348095961174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519046328452122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526955217783576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770050988233344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952153935711064,0.15972623747115644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379427386345936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850757908021698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195964419882637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617253997358897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803594136061146,0.0,0.0,0.1497523850716002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103565724403599,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Selena_likes_dragons,2020/02/08,"Trying to understand why all my memories (even my most recent ones) are in third person perspective As the title suggestions, all my memories are always stored in third person and I'm trying to figure out why. I've tried to look up information about first person versus third person memory but haven't found it particularly helpful. Everything I find keeps talking about remembering older memories in third person, like childhood memories. Articles also talk about experiencing third person perspective with memories that are unclear or that you are detached from (as in observing your past self as separate from yourself now), but none of that fits me at all. Even my most recent memories that I remember in fresh detail, like my memories from just yesterday, are in third person. I don't feel detached from myself in these memories either, I very much still go through my thoughts and emotions in my recent memories despite the third person perspective. I haven't really found anything helpful yet that describes what my brain is doing, which is storing every memory in third person regardless of any other detail, so if anyone has any perspective on this it'd be really helpful to understanding it.",12.414057971014493,10.806578425120776,11.507536231884055,53.52478260869566,54.603864734299506,15.190338164251205,43.772946859903385,13.731508374201276,6.445865700483093,982,43,134,31,9,318,115,207,0.027999999999999997,0.87,0.102,0.9576,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,1,11,2,0,0,2,0,14,1,1,0,3,30,24,11,0,2,7,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,10,13,4,0,1,11,0,2,1,4,0,0,10,3,3,17,2,31,19,8,26,0,0,1,0,19,14,0,5,13,108,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296020597261764,0.07591442230409304,0.0,0.0,0.12408519291939975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379329182596101,0.0,0.07507822937107063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184788802163124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262654573201672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051906893083272,0.0,0.0768690109438788,0.0,0.08199569620004851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046130910360507364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338669075925513,0.07760402896853008,0.0,0.20006786576919702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05185067544826575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18345770997420666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109342589180718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914514787918935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766140117537262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706786361100356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06182286623484293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709366473217961,0.0,0.7169621081303925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689432866145973,0.0,0.2702492208049723,0.0,0.20670183309863832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517749311715798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285999882439059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666168906092766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243001122472073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858267337782505,0.0,0.0,0.18995668828832607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752780269294919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16464991221553965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Paranoiadestroyer,2020/02/08,"A subreddit offering a space, mental health information and news, support and a place to promote your mental health related work/blogs etc, mainly for people from the UK 🙂 Hello all! As someone from the UK who has dealt with mental health issues for years, I've noticed a lack of active UK spaces and would like to try and change that if there is the demand for it. [Here is my subreddit](https://www.reddit.com/r/MentalHealthUK/)

Anyone is welcome to participate but I would prefer it if people who are not from the UK only talk about their specific healthcare processes/systems if relevant to a comments discussion rather than promoting it - just so we dont get swamped out/conflicting information due to uneven population. 

I'm keeping the sub active mainly through posting mental health news articles but eventually hoping it can be a more varied sub where people can either ask questions, talk with like minded people, give support, vent or promote their own blogs or work if related to mental health/therapy. Thanks for reading if you got this far 🙂",10.691993993993997,10.029610259459464,9.648288288288287,62.50084084084085,57.21621621621622,12.330330330330332,39.474474474474476,11.429527900616536,4.7581591591591605,858,35,127,19,9,270,118,185,0.015,0.805,0.179,0.9837,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,2,2,4,7,7,0,0,11,0,11,4,0,0,1,33,21,15,0,11,13,0,0,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,8,7,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,7,7,20,17,8,8,0,0,0,0,19,5,0,9,4,85,15,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179154083148706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959856518224129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861471047382916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033231309120175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450784156743225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05364254826445226,0.09849356062970953,0.0,0.0,0.08211719703242852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5456844480906469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019777284461616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10716422326644487,0.0,0.091260723963889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032195142645572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5173525586262888,0.0,0.10367073842575412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689420357861352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808765192324484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.284722883182849,0.0,0.10727171900263632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833261549562072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501756536847195,0.0,0.10270105938707598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699473233107356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330248304311601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16504977776280216,0.0,0.0945277566077163,0.1174158375020393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06970841376247465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494947333970404,0.0,0.0,0.14587229678728908,0.0,0.0,0.06611822252875726
mentalhealth,AnonymousMrSir,2020/02/08,"Long term effects of waking up to arguments?? So every single morning my nana and sister go at it full fledged. It breaks out into a screaming match of who can scream the loudest basically. I am the one who has to get in the middle and it wakes me up every time(keep in mind my sister is 14 so she’s “at that age”). On the morning that it doesn’t happen(which is only when my papaw isn’t working) I’m fine for the rest of the day. But on days that I do get woke up by this I’m in the worst mood all day. I’m an 19 year old male, and I know this has to cause some kind of damage to my brain. Does anyone know the long term effects of something like this? Or if there is any?",-0.12441780821917806,1.8584164726027448,1.9509417808219176,97.32791952054797,86.32876712328769,4.197945205479451,18.029109589041095,5.148860815047168,-0.6618342465753422,519,13,122,2,16,173,90,146,0.11,0.861,0.028999999999999998,-0.9225,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,4,8,0,0,10,0,10,3,3,3,1,16,19,9,0,1,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,12,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,1,2,9,3,23,18,8,27,0,1,0,0,6,14,0,3,12,81,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379865340590667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418801877674597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265159401971426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084456363431915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925826987448369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17756890695978966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419227757040783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120253927395156,0.0,0.11531907756915215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17943365193941127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18035674540240512,0.0,0.21130072863505603,0.2230293131139072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913213409775956,0.0,0.0,0.35913994924254383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20488240903426952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129211092435281,0.0,0.13749784058254974,0.15432306632330745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15621090975064242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831911813633862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14772172737178374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13066812215731705
mentalhealth,Weepingwillowlady,2020/02/08,"Toxic Parents I think my parents are making my mental health worse. I suffer from low self esteem and problems with over eating, they don't understand or support me. Sometimes it's easer to just have nothing to do with them but then I feel guilty. I think I'm also suffering from trauma.",3.852,6.204817472727277,4.576363636363637,81.84454545454548,74.27272727272728,5.854545454545455,25.54545454545455,6.742157984588678,1.2951090909090908,231,8,38,2,5,74,44,55,0.34299999999999997,0.657,0.0,-0.9576,2,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,12,11,5,0,1,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,9,1,7,11,0,3,0,3,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,27,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863290926847072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23841598732370045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11781121719172293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24766687740682145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15552853873586625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348080345000373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235686764130725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.517435289075958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229484281038947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430686111711472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304418161111337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644043288803445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985925044206639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425600154654119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23744572936379416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mardor31,2020/02/08,"I am generally anxious and do well regardless i don't know today I am generally pretty anxious, I take medication for it and for that I am kind of flat but my anxiety is low level. I just get anxious about stuff that i kind of out of my control and I just want to fix it all. I struggle staying motivated to get normal stuff done because I am in my head. I have a therapist too and I feel silly talking to them because I think my anxiety is silly and unnecessary. I just need the motivation again to be more invested in it. I know it will help but something is just stopping me.

​

My thoughts might be scattered and weird to decipher.",2.6329427083333314,4.806983492187502,4.8871875,79.02239583333336,77.359375,8.016666666666666,30.979166666666664,8.841846274778883,2.8790135416666667,509,26,97,12,12,177,72,128,0.146,0.716,0.138,-0.0258,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,3,8,8,0,1,2,0,15,2,1,3,1,30,25,8,0,4,6,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,7,0,2,7,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,2,1,22,5,14,19,2,9,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,1,3,78,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15440144942733694,0.17315619148954198,0.0,0.0,0.21802811581385048,0.4829619468963548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17373645918159045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15982872296282646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582958073775898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205356915421816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14890339777860756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14624872453507856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551645298996443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967889462703159,0.1566313454147908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355632341385313,0.0,0.151172682180855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10566383247124264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396222392621842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14497632022253748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970542222051027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15188875383613065,0.0,0.11913850958564172,0.0,0.1489746020592456,0.3262626442579044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714418019035794,0.1145381488511965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16545643968877108,0.0,0.0913098776969306,0.0,0.11313110410864677,0.0,0.0,0.1350757515491986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405169394765412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281269030315302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315619148954198,0.0
mentalhealth,ChaosofaMadHatter,2020/02/08,"My mental health is slipping. I need people to kick me in gear so I can actually use my coping mechanisms. I normally have a lot of coping mechanisms that keep me focused and oriented on what I need. Yoga, meditation, drawing, reading, going to the gym- all that stuff. I try to stick to a strict schedule so I balance what feeds my creative side and my physical side to build up a solid foundation for my mental health. 

My issue I’m facing right now is the past two weeks have been shit. I haven’t been able to wake up in time to do what I need to do in order to keep my stress levels steady, and in turn by the time I get home from work I’m completely useless because the stress just eats at me. Then I don’t do my full wind down routine which makes it harder for me to wake up, and the cycle repeats. My boyfriend has really picked up the slack but this can’t continue long term. 

What do y’all’s do to get back on track? If you don’t have any ideas, can you give me some tough love to get me going again?",3.2437142857142867,4.149259752380953,4.479523809523808,87.88214285714285,72.90476190476191,7.6952380952380945,24.47619047619048,8.021203637495839,1.1442761904761904,788,22,173,11,15,260,120,210,0.049,0.895,0.055999999999999994,0.5128,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,3,0,1,6,6,1,2,9,0,19,9,4,3,1,20,36,9,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,10,4,2,2,1,3,0,2,4,5,0,1,2,0,28,1,29,34,5,33,0,1,0,1,5,17,1,3,13,113,38,2,0.14002552525914785,0.0,0.13664471372807455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522215885608123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767098566443456,0.0,0.08535826052803955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14681409913711332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14328106975081192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21947267282243813,0.13432524309268684,0.1591594657885392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29768117092343144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14045701881840006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807177405206432,0.0,0.14615026859697178,0.0,0.24892224126916784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12391818350803566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904469421515836,0.12637850350788987,0.0,0.09346812542650436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822255902123932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31148145816801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719528451990742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367020807829688,0.09707606835682447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006341815491472,0.0,0.08970393703950358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958103348484063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373418945764818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207975321749761,0.0,0.1602957256083199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16330001966810884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506814013408277,0.15230756214016788,0.13678459167359025,0.0,0.0,0.12093709541125575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232003015340801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194025008461656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Motionpicturerama,2020/02/08,"Page/ subreddit for recovery memes? Hi,

I'm looking for any online page that posts or talks about the recovery process of mental illness. I've seen the r/mentalhealthmemes and r/depression_memes but is there any page that covers the relatable hurdles and struggles of recovery? Even a Tumblr is good.",7.35192307692308,9.739469576923078,6.4992307692307705,71.62076923076923,64.76923076923077,10.584615384615383,36.07692307692308,10.686352973137794,4.569753846153846,246,12,37,7,4,75,39,52,0.102,0.825,0.07200000000000001,-0.1556,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,5,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,5,4,3,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,19,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5011076562008457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24335308161492886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30903245057426626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093992680254077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3713038165963634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35286648167329066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3851765499004464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961404722460183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yippyskippyhippy,2020/02/08,Trusting How do y'all get over your past and let yourself trust someone?,5.419285714285714,6.865190928571433,4.19857142857143,89.89642857142859,68.28571428571428,5.6000000000000005,35.42857142857143,3.1291,1.6758000000000002,59,3,11,0,1,17,14,14,0.0,0.647,0.353,0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043004110474876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5955834814954135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5560040629195414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4934987927270899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Missriverblue,2020/02/08,"Hey you, YEAH...you! How are you doing?    I have struggled a long while with depression and trauma anxiety....I often find when I am in the midst of serious emotional turmoil it helps me to reach out...to feel not alone...so...How are you?
   How are you for real? Are you struggling? Do you need to vent, or a shoulder to cry on...can I help you in any way? I see you. Your not alone!",-1.2723076923076917,0.7544642051282082,1.16551282051282,98.28365384615387,99.25641025641023,4.651282051282052,16.756410256410255,6.42735559955562,-0.232558974358974,280,8,66,4,12,94,54,78,0.24,0.644,0.11599999999999999,-0.9082,0,2,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,9,0,0,4,6,0,3,3,0,8,1,1,2,0,12,11,6,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,2,14,0,8,11,0,6,0,1,1,0,12,2,0,2,3,43,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25972004305026103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17053085412032767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754568969407129,0.0,0.0,0.21598612984198154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820802722282513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679584662829968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22919742900637785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33616903828519706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22192180820646512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18594131079761653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854289090732181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19982964644004408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5243143682108705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990479835244534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theboywiththepipe,2020/02/08,"Having a Voice What makes you feel like you have a voice?

Hi everyone, I just wanted to hear how everyone was doing. I just feel like I have not had a voice lately and just wanted to hear what others have done to be heard?",2.0336956521739147,3.739741717391308,3.2602173913043515,92.17119565217396,77.47826086956522,6.339130434782609,15.847826086956525,7.1686216300943375,-0.2482869565217389,173,2,38,2,4,56,27,46,0.0,0.8759999999999999,0.124,0.6553,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,9,0,0,2,0,11,17,2,0,2,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,6,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,8,5,2,3,12,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,3,29,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.248864193247648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4647501907701803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24592477421194675,0.347464928168838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5481776560708093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27432493270996944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376172526507141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16232885833735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28687536368902283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xsleepingbutt,2020/02/08,"How to care about your mental health as a (small) YouTuber? YouTube is a great place! You can watch videos you like; posting own one; commenting them; and like or dislike them. Some of those creators’ follower count grows and grows. In every video genre you find a big player: James Charles in the Beauty genre; PewDiePie in Gaming; Shane Dawson in random videos; etc. But is this growing good for your soul? I mean, of course, it’s great for you if you see people like your videos – the stuff you created! But is it well for your mental health? Don’t get me wrong. Of course, not every YouTuber turns into some kind of monster. However, there are many good examples. The Paul family, for example. Well … They don’t care about their fans and are “coded” to say stuff like I love you. That’s an affect of being a big YouTuber. It’s not healthy. Yeah. But who does really care about his or her own mental health if it’s ya full time job? The least. I wanna be one of those least. Even if I got a small channel. Your mind is still important! So, what are your best tips for caring about your mind if you have a stressful YouTuber life? Even as a small one.",1.6984615384615367,4.268961973094172,1.9890807174887897,96.0783020006899,83.97757847533632,5.0451190065539855,18.442393928941016,6.490185161304077,-0.1078891341842012,892,22,186,9,26,269,125,223,0.052000000000000005,0.71,0.23800000000000002,0.993,3,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,16,4,1,12,19,0,1,12,1,13,5,0,2,0,25,24,16,0,5,11,0,0,4,0,0,4,1,0,0,12,4,0,0,2,6,0,4,4,2,2,3,1,3,27,17,25,21,9,19,1,0,2,1,27,12,0,9,6,123,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113105738353556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4325687292175627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281978065500647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829253122153327,0.14011225601306332,0.0,0.17873172496911513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999034925098446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09694314325020374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05541553074894467,0.0,0.0,0.17792761671175686,0.08483131775794575,0.2338780660873468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33823217901555724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525494306072326,0.0,0.0,0.11045226115285073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491812503636855,0.20727554390815467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572943761631383,0.0,0.0,0.1075350980199894,0.0,0.1155378512039582,0.0,0.0,0.32067119346303163,0.0,0.21419448474655112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21562084751075325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353337135552866,0.0,0.11081724182037128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158268490076107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794911481306465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434858493312734,0.0,0.0,0.08452151546575898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470509189092165,0.0,0.12149917308482208,0.0,0.24284224355964815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061848410179129475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537023199107425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907336015331916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596740665342123,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Signs_In_The_Skies,2020/02/08,"A small realization about why I just CAN'T be depressed, as according to my family and them being right. You know what's actually something that's hard to admit? Growing up, you were never diagnoSed wIth anything, nor had to take meds to deal with any depression or any other mental health issues. But because of that, you feel that like your current state of mental health was never that bad and it's manageable by yourself. Furthermore, compared to others, you feel like you shouldn't bring up how bad you think it's getting, since other people have it worse. Instead, it's been a slow, neverending spiral into even worse depression and anxiety that you haven't realized it and can't control it because, ""LOL I'm good. I have memes."" 
Anyway, thanks for coming to my TED talk. 
Drink water and stay hydrated you glorious bastards.",6.116327751196174,7.821042618421052,6.179354066985649,75.37138755980862,66.89473684210526,9.211483253588515,30.92344497607656,9.573946990214177,3.0912552631578962,666,26,109,14,11,211,101,152,0.12,0.703,0.177,0.8287,1,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,9,1,1,6,10,1,0,2,1,12,5,0,2,2,23,23,10,0,1,3,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,15,9,2,1,6,1,0,3,7,6,0,0,4,3,14,4,17,16,0,14,0,3,0,0,13,5,1,1,6,75,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.13553712404909388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889006490625412,0.0,0.1062508768333812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429507361022358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319355855466413,0.16933275836526998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964189512501262,0.0,0.0,0.15577754175942002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319003984737838,0.3588786351254764,0.14097096637516068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605984519949302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173588648983813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309336326454178,0.0,0.14045445236332235,0.1984468476500668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256457048390337,0.0,0.0,0.11649478863972715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441863580706815,0.0,0.0,0.2952682814413122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496563053332598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633060409567831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13570979662410915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15427607044244787,0.0,0.2799379777440065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21424188124338925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628920695213078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861175545807975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489168334013675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692471712462542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480388271574768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044283949372747,0.11163494855592254,0.0,0.12787174135035345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899544476301306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532710210560202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28308263575214515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Darth-Ainz-Revan,2020/02/08,"My miserable life, I guess Trying to Figure Out Things

Well, I (20M) know a girl for half a year or so. We’re sharing similar interests and started online a conversation through them. We got to know each other over time and shared many personal things with each other. We basically formed a bond of mutual trust and she’s actually the first person, apart from my family, caring about my lonely ass genuinely. Though as I learned today, she’s not trusting me at all. She told me about her miserable living conditions; poor overall physical and mental health; suicide attempts and her twisted, hypocritical and manipulating others personality. She also likes to toy around with people she has a relationship with(e.g. family, friends, etc.)

The thing is, I don’t dislike her for being like this. Nor do I care for all those red flags. I’m also one of the first persons that got to know her on such a deep level. I see more and more of my former self in her and I know this pain she’s feeling. That pain, being able to shred you into pieces. I don’t plan to cut ties with her even though she told me, that she may consciously or unconsciously try to manipulate me.

For those of you thinking that I’m guilt trapped, you’re wrong. I honestly don’t feel emotions like other people’s and I doubt, that I even have them. Which is why I come with this here. I severely lack knowledge and experience about human relationships. I don’t even know how to make real friends nor how to keep them.

So, do you guys have any advice for me? [Also, I’m asking for just something I’ll be able to comprehend and being logical in nature]

TL;DR: I need advice on human relationships. For more details read the text. It’s required to understand my situation.",3.092885750044701,5.715389328267483,4.4671062041838026,80.27052521008406,78.209726443769,7.5180046486679775,24.57008760951189,8.4952907291091,1.954243268371178,1375,49,250,30,34,454,181,329,0.168,0.7340000000000001,0.098,-0.9768,0,3,1,0,0,1,49.0,2,3,3,5,20,23,1,4,10,0,16,5,1,5,2,56,42,25,1,2,4,0,2,3,2,1,4,0,0,9,19,23,0,2,14,2,1,1,7,9,1,4,4,4,47,14,41,33,11,20,0,3,2,1,42,12,1,5,10,180,66,3,0.18480174360976614,0.0,0.09016992189556458,0.0,0.0,0.18058612504045848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22167883139654854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283576138822708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822563660287826,0.08638234193674384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18841769400073316,0.0,0.0,0.0795951693275717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393854396315784,0.0,0.0,0.10305139712982332,0.1830897131212454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038578296236524,0.17421463694129194,0.0,0.09344131424020534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719226870845265,0.0,0.0,0.14277736869235969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478028363252905,0.0,0.10178997765947786,0.09149139033120496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982178058690286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08213014042378654,0.0,0.0,0.2539055132620172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526546837421293,0.13542719584664986,0.0,0.08159166266615901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616782994342879,0.09367998111984914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311834586233468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851407563612544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06261322208834688,0.0,0.1966420846925029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12811826030947174,0.3227235087690091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242587679306358,0.10517242123921776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976118687725151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363153164729053,0.0,0.09639426117383827,0.10438668427702197,0.0,0.0,0.10386245135345423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113470541355542,0.0,0.0,0.06540181264817342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107155648618407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18416110031539232,0.059206747668891314,0.1815667748068936,0.0,0.053879691417554776,0.0,0.0875852223206744,0.17658598552386987,0.0,0.12546825320598698,0.0,0.0,0.09619256624064912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307948065118609,0.0,0.08337741476767843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102584798677472,0.0,0.059503131960762415
mentalhealth,Arkchon,2020/02/08,"Been stressed about life i guess? ( A Rant?) To be honest...I don't know why I'm making this post, one of my online friend just suggested to me to write a long post to vent all of my build up stress, hopefully, this is something that they thought. Also, sorry for any grammatical error and weird way of phrasing.

Guess i have to start from the beginning? Well,, our family live in Indonesia and long story short is that ,my family is blessed with a geniuses, I'm not saying this to be narcissistic or something, but when you got a big brother who went to UI (University of Indonesia) and a big sister who graduated S1 in 4 years (the minimum is 3,5 years) and already got invited to work in a law firm, you tend to get compared to them a lot.

My family appears to have everything they wanted, i mean, my family is the literally the picturesque type, my father is a contractor, my mother is a stay at home mom, we made more money than 50% of Indonesian, father and mother is at home most of the time, and i usually get what i wanted under some limitation. But, i guess even a family like ours have some downside.

See, here's the thing. I DON'T know what's wrong with myself at the moment, my life is actually pretty decent when you think about it from outside perspective, I'm at the top 20 in our school, i won pretty much every scrabble and English debate competition in provincial level, I have my Best friend helping me and my teacher to listen to my problem.

Now though...I'm not so sure whats wrong with me but i feel like i'm tired of this life, i don't even know why, sure, I'm used to the anxiety of my impending graduation and my college life keeping me awake all the time, i mean, who's not by this point.

I know that this post seems narcissistic sure, but i just feels like i'm faking my face at this point, even though i was already sure of where i want to be going, Institute of Technology in Bandung. I knew that if i wanted to be equal to my siblings, i need to be atleast at that level, and everybody agree. My teacher supported me, my family will help me.

I don't know why but i feel like it's wrong for me to go there, call it a gut feeling or something i don't know, but i feel like i knew that if i do this, I will regret it, I've been talking to some of my online friends about it but they basically just said that i'm stressed and angry, which, i'm not entirely convinced i am.",7.260272188286022,5.474349671487602,7.976460653970538,75.35603485447359,64.68181818181819,11.557887172116425,34.06000718648939,10.472087959537523,3.2295232842256545,1867,63,388,38,23,630,216,484,0.10400000000000001,0.737,0.159,0.9858,1,0,3,0,0,0,69.0,4,3,4,5,19,29,0,3,21,0,30,7,2,3,6,81,85,27,0,10,18,7,5,5,3,2,5,3,2,0,28,15,0,2,18,0,1,4,9,10,1,1,12,9,64,19,57,66,11,45,1,1,1,0,33,23,0,15,18,254,92,6,0.0,0.0,0.06517832747816506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14741093704015582,0.05341269447726967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04542013286697947,0.0,0.05109489000651847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009297596150034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820102238201092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13234436748787767,0.0,0.05627425171820675,0.0,0.060027394539263014,0.0,0.37778735145852577,0.0,0.16885754283429774,0.1908618574267595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480755496072612,0.0,0.06979102399426873,0.0,0.07591766632889409,0.0,0.1068376401542085,0.0,0.2207332675379938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953712490001699,0.0,0.1339935269998164,0.06633847871824028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059366860654146335,0.0,0.0,0.22023933938065066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18870567840292304,0.1631534095993772,0.0,0.058977627982224924,0.1182157688333123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05678327285704174,0.0,0.06319920696831413,0.04458347433726774,0.0,0.0,0.14550983878784304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822474738732167,0.0,0.0,0.04909902954005053,0.04952463931206773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04525927280345237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12627806327648333,0.0,0.19190178737337826,0.13590080541070804,0.0,0.06390991392123176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353348353865296,0.053114840148513885,0.0,0.06759600200127977,0.05322373560425637,0.060803967712222524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425679740116024,0.0,0.0747669945206575,0.047274974546228685,0.07119026040760974,0.0,0.0,0.22952640503785424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579357272377503,0.2517987003858618,0.0,0.0,0.05368403148609286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04437293594419865,0.04279694056904696,0.13124352842652376,0.05302454960150685,0.07789267413812871,0.07676636577688309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057685931595269725,0.07356078961467692,0.0,0.1575801190992679,0.053015543170890224,0.0,0.0,0.06005308070323664,0.061915875039272025,0.180805317220016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0486246033376999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21907623957358305,0.0,0.08602235733123807
mentalhealth,Jarlrurikstad,2020/02/08,"Horrific and very disturbing nightmare I had one of the most bizarre dreams/nightmares just recently and I don’t even want to get too much into the details. But it was a combination of a post apocalyptic event where I saw almost everything I loved burn before my eyes. 

Most of my dreams are usually random and don’t make any sense, they’re usually not in any sort of specific order of events. But this one hit me hard... The symbolism and darkness was just... wow. 

But overall a lot of my dreams have a clear (or unclear at times) theme and underlying message. Is there any cause for these sort of things to happen?",4.0248717948717925,6.1446202478632514,4.605478632478633,82.88257692307694,73.01709401709401,8.44068376068376,27.939316239316238,9.120678840339163,2.407479316239317,487,19,93,11,10,155,82,117,0.147,0.72,0.133,-0.4092,0,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,7,0,8,2,1,2,1,25,15,9,0,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,2,4,3,8,2,14,10,4,13,0,0,2,1,2,5,0,9,6,63,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20898022774092548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4257640187605229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758605485664766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21438964419668627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137842616882844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875637015389156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903574022352558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18455035793057484,0.0,0.1869518135690504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774270051916824,0.18835748662166107,0.0,0.13930708701164055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15341654911370248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828374211851749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19987435096899386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20606343398203195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864923136717705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169309026527808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4597012445452584,0.172197152165083,0.12309509122484705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mr_wrong111,2020/02/08,"I dont think i want to live anymore So let me tell my story.I was 14, I was experiencing some verbal bullying at my school and my dad gave me the option to go to israel to a boarding school and study there and i said yes. When I arrived I realized I had terrible social anxiety I was afraid to talk to people, because of this i didnt really make a lot of friends. I later on developed some depression and it was really hard to enjoy things I didn't see the point in living. In the end of the year I got this massive headache so I decided to go to sleep. I woke up with the same headache and now with double vision. The school took me to get an MRI and surprise! Brain cancer.But I wasn't diagnosed correctly the first time. In the beginning they diagnosed me with neurosarcoidosis and put me on a high dose of steroids for months during this time i gained 20 kilos and my face wasn't even recognizable anymore. I also got a lot of stretch marks around my body which is for sure permanent. During this time my social anxiety turned into general anxiety it was so bad I was getting panic attacks and was constantly shaking. Then when they saw the steroids weren't working they did another biopsy then I was diagnosed with a germinoma. The tumor fucked up my hormones so now I have hypothyroidism, diabetes insipidus and i cant produce testosterone anymore. I basically have to take meds for the rest of my lives. Now I'm struggling through chemotherapy and i really cant tolerate it. I'm also gonna need radiation which will most likely fuck up my brain and make learning hard. Also to get radiation my whole family has to move here so I'll have insurance good enough for radiation. I don't want to live anymore I've been depressed for a long time and now I have to live with physical symptoms.",3.637945075757578,5.647968116477273,5.00986363636364,80.04271212121213,73.80113636363636,8.784242424242425,28.77878787878788,9.3871,2.7590576515151515,1435,60,271,36,30,478,177,352,0.146,0.7929999999999999,0.06,-0.9799,0,0,0,0,0,2,22.0,0,0,3,4,18,17,3,4,18,1,28,14,5,3,2,40,55,25,0,3,0,1,2,1,1,2,7,1,0,0,10,20,0,0,4,0,0,6,9,11,0,1,23,6,43,6,43,29,10,40,0,2,2,2,11,14,2,6,21,185,53,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20150474010135647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807277102983169,0.19276059056807948,0.0,0.3331893568841096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477054779606687,0.0,0.0955528471514166,0.0,0.0,0.07012968077090702,0.051200648060215216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329600324347907,0.0,0.18752534967141934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907653439027182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14468410303105347,0.2557498586486169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843781474869873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439184301835577,0.08678602651070337,0.0,0.05547582031973078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918003473211599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144341895996774,0.0,0.0,0.06489188974305786,0.1552982113135159,0.13164681438564574,0.0,0.09546900022188187,0.07044837315087596,0.1343518996935433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048038774277314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887419938642872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858873503431314,0.0,0.041034172019367,0.0,0.3708316819518812,0.07433013820580274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14281372310636636,0.0,0.0,0.11213041515152383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329600324347907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670414879520703,0.08927003704298132,0.0,0.062278887512021985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854633099858426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05822936854921545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939944043283279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443500116756733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16142197655726334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989547686794585,0.0,0.0,0.255012688434117,0.06693062460849425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405250115325509,0.17123821369933534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780651114771063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916131825912777,0.08729968503764429,0.06315141320904846,0.06750946204871275,0.07341257308958474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05580044851681576,0.05381858171168745,0.0,0.0,0.1959052769709738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933180283098492,0.0,0.09135900658948444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908113060323656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377389346536548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06114706222297301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408799327131796
mentalhealth,CoreOfFocus,2020/02/08,"Sleep hallucination that causes me to jump out of bed and attack a perceived threat Sometimes when I am sleeping I wake up and look around and I can see some demon or figure or threat in my room standing beside my bed/in the corner/on the bed and it causes me to jump out of bed and try to attack the hallucination while saying things like ""Alright motherf----r lets go"" or ""Alright demon time to die"". Does anyone know what this is? is this sleep paralysis? I feel paralysed for a couple of seconds when I am looking at the thing but as soon as I can move I spring out of bed and try and attack it.

​

Any thoughts as to what this might be",3.7139534883720913,5.242691441860464,4.442550387596898,86.18801162790699,72.56589147286822,6.4003100775193795,24.527906976744184,6.742157984588678,0.8044381395348839,512,15,102,4,10,164,75,129,0.102,0.861,0.037000000000000005,-0.8504,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,5,0,6,2,9,4,4,2,0,24,16,17,1,0,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,5,0,10,11,0,0,5,0,0,4,0,5,0,1,1,5,11,3,20,12,1,19,2,0,3,0,1,8,0,5,7,73,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15657543435087135,0.17559424470154933,0.09827107117326987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104404843015037,0.0,0.0,0.12864364212165885,0.0,0.4931995271525487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969010868273685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15989645297730856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499775204827922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646079425790646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306808924848601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212779135812605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941836372729064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14777023689133026,0.0,0.07059979491411074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427023184566633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330120579983894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15359019073748995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149193519948102,0.0,0.0,0.11515495837476193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4338400692454917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14292308990229588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19201070851597796,0.0,0.0,0.11472399922476904,0.08426435636507433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962242418709918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17559424470154933,0.0
mentalhealth,Sir_SquishyMan,2020/02/08,"How do I control my rage when I'm reminded that other people have universal healthcare? Whenever I'm reminded other people live in countries with universal healthcare, I basically go into a state of rage for a period of time where I can't accomplish anything because I'm so busy seeing red and wanting the entirety of humanity to simply die out. At this point I'm basically spending several hours a day being unproductive because I'm barely controlling my rage and feel like doing anything would basically cause me to put a fist through my computer monitor.

​

How am I supposed to address this?",13.627660550458716,9.869443486238533,13.549426605504589,46.455149082568816,54.504587155963314,17.13853211009174,54.77293577981651,14.90622815163357,8.198814678899081,496,30,69,17,4,171,74,109,0.16,0.8170000000000001,0.023,-0.9422,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,5,4,3,0,5,0,7,0,0,5,0,13,16,6,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,5,0,2,1,0,1,2,1,3,0,0,0,3,8,1,13,14,0,14,0,0,2,0,1,6,0,0,6,45,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21286034970501225,0.2387159421803084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3233336381609516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395159086593153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20181476561722267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4406849545642837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669807936895494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20389065238879292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933422247359854,0.14034844023786675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165065874775716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934699103258626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597863864674708,0.0,0.17347453719317962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723961638595101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18571473060209528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19749287160893048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655025842041706,0.0,0.0,0.2219397319819248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145552649296398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587503247769805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13955693906315092,0.0,0.2387159421803084,0.0
mentalhealth,Shikagure,2020/02/08,"I feel like everyone is staring at me in public I really would like to enjoy activities alone in public. (breakfast, lunch, dinner, shopping, watching the movies)

But I help myself from feeling people around me are staring at me. It makes me feel like I'm being judged or people are talking bout me. I understand the part where I'm very conscious about how people feel about me. 

I've been wanting to dress better these days, means dressing against the weather in my country. However, the feeling of being judged or being stared at constantly is killing me. Anyway can I stop it? I feel like it's getting more and more serious these days...",4.746949152542372,7.005056237288137,5.0120000000000005,80.14613559322035,71.37288135593221,7.092881355932204,30.444067796610174,7.908726449838941,2.3361803389830507,508,22,84,7,10,160,72,118,0.08199999999999999,0.747,0.171,0.8535,1,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,6,8,1,0,4,0,10,3,0,2,0,19,23,5,1,2,3,0,6,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,3,1,9,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,10,15,6,14,18,3,12,0,0,4,0,4,8,0,2,8,58,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16922568889983536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14545425459300387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450767479403911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17656959631024655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107497085747873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15612884531610524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.495697927121308,0.3501835982010634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536600671623855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109518765711121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807699510238505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31930192193841794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906597874308277,0.0,0.0,0.17798268551356786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17693850580779627,0.0,0.3398280331253491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467362692551684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13660371705650476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132896266926547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17009769207438502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13481619162768793,0.09637332091930946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160695741547096,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mruhhadf,2020/02/08,"How do you calm your nervous stomach before important events? Hello,

I have an exam on Monday which is kinda not important but obv i dont want to fail. I suffer from anxiety and depression so exams make me feel like it's the end of the world. So bad. Around 2 weeks ago I learned everything about the exam, all of the topics and now it's kinda like, I only repeat/reread the stuffs and I know them almost by heart. But still, I feel like dying. I wake up and my stomach is shrinking, I am taking some tranquilizers but Idk if they're helping me. I do realize that I have prepared myself, that the chance to even fail is like prob min except if I don't get a panic attack or something and don't go but  I need help. Most of the time I am getting a nervous stomach before exams and it's really bad. There was a case I almost missed my most important exam for university cause I had to run to the toilet.

 I really would like to hear your ways to like get over the nervous stomach because I don't want to miss/fail the exam because I can't get out of the toilet.",1.2030613460393091,3.403071529680368,3.371880087353585,87.84714711137583,82.56164383561644,5.817828072265238,20.480643240023824,7.079830092131019,0.6018293031566411,831,24,168,11,23,283,120,219,0.153,0.634,0.213,0.9257,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,3,1,2,9,20,1,4,15,0,17,6,6,3,1,37,32,16,1,6,9,0,2,6,0,1,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,0,5,0,0,2,6,12,0,0,2,3,28,8,21,29,4,18,0,5,0,0,8,6,0,10,15,113,35,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148169188061125,0.0,0.2744605672327283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483867725039188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199867159244338,0.0,0.15590791779596697,0.0,0.0,0.2288528878132101,0.1670821261081371,0.0,0.2332295733211745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407824653823031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803623813533995,0.0,0.14223056783735574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061514844800953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213807614504383,0.0,0.0,0.09051660826355808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316677150065047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385876468839895,0.19580925477696104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286400406716838,0.0,0.07788555486509982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445912611423224,0.16239840761340302,0.18371609642614675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531608025845599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4017181596619453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147827651942578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161676982018264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422852751199624,0.0,0.16079220798177593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755884483600425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550356140869248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944392501829957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156883179641921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304041829013676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991175754655133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16166480880200393,0.10877955543182696,0.10992884183948877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735248995498452,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,esfpizzacat,2020/02/08,"I'd like to receive a mental health screening I don't know what's going on.

1. My mood changes at the drop of a hat.

2. Reckless, self destructive behavior.

3.  Impulsive behavior, followed by burning bridges out of fear of rejection.

This is severely affecting my social life and I don't know what's going on. I suspect I fall on the Cluster B spectrum, but I genuinely don't know.",0.8818909090909095,3.4575302800000043,3.2744242424242462,83.73054545454549,92.86666666666667,6.993939393939394,30.81818181818182,8.00094639256281,3.0438,301,18,55,8,11,103,53,75,0.20199999999999999,0.773,0.026000000000000002,-0.8442,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,1,4,0,4,2,0,1,0,8,10,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,5,3,3,0,0,0,1,7,1,10,10,0,11,0,1,1,0,3,5,0,0,1,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29705174358711584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31598080755767183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191729902736969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984798579245065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4629650246458638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19833906444304192,0.13718588606131374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829828094532815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29293818086581525,0.3172268247751684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28624272061359723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bella-c,2020/02/08,"Bipolar (f/20) and abusing alcohol I was recently diagnosed with bipolar and I still haven’t received my medication.

But this past year I’ve been abusing alcohol, which my doctor says is normal for someone with this illness. I’ve lost friends, my job thinks I’m unreliable, I’ve lost the trust of my family, I’ve dropped out of school, became promiscuous.

My life has been completely flipped upside down, which only makes me feel worse, which makes me want to drink more.

I’ve said I was going to get sober before and then just gave myself an excuse after I was clean for 1-2 weeks. 

The other night, while drunk, I skipped work, and stole a bunch of antidepressants from a relative and tried to overdose.

It didn’t work, just made me sick. I didn’t tell anyone about this.

This is a wake up call, I want to be healthy, I want to feel normal. 

Any tips on dealing with something like this? Would anyone else like to share their story?",3.9292364990689,5.929033916201121,4.226011173184356,86.01875605214153,72.96648044692738,7.231433891992553,25.89981378026071,8.021203637495839,1.508465623836127,737,25,143,11,15,230,113,179,0.128,0.74,0.132,-0.4561,1,0,4,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,1,4,4,7,0,0,6,0,13,13,1,3,0,24,29,8,0,6,3,0,2,2,1,1,10,2,1,0,10,9,4,0,3,2,0,2,3,2,0,0,12,4,18,5,21,15,2,16,0,2,0,0,11,4,0,0,11,81,28,5,0.0,0.3152554212737521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843533061962852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047007788540627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860458591158408,0.13631266425344266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320513363962507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358461857616136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13948731202035905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13715584484961515,0.0,0.13503028571722164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616954236555973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032612490599835,0.0,0.0,0.11113577970315662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254159369174882,0.0,0.1345355382072282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278446047676358,0.0,0.06950661499555015,0.0,0.0756082903342472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201921383455428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396833708374294,0.12999082778514867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29045234437867284,0.0,0.0,0.12588332124576465,0.17760715969313975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402130845313578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484670339473836,0.2606970525586612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118103135924783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699936948583124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135850447833042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654914993108335,0.1057967782520606,0.0,0.1346410760996206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272226175697715,0.10241878505073004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624393794761426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628065921799075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524507310179226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032374549867607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354069343520136,0.0,0.10671467648016934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19370580284263456,0.0,0.13557660194181514,0.09450603950921622,0.0,0.0,0.08567180318951924
mentalhealth,jusranersom,2020/02/08,"Obsessed with equality I have a partner who suffers from AHDH, MDD and GAD, he doesn’t take any medication yet, but we’re working on it.

I love him with my entire heart, I really do, but things have been kind of hard lately. There’s no drama or anything, don’t worry.
I myself, suffer from something, though we’re not sure what yet, the psychiatrist are still trying to figure it out.

Here is my problem, I am obsessed with being equal to him. If he doesn’t eat, then I don’t eat. If he doesn’t dye his hair, I won’t dye my hair. If he’s scared of being among too many people, then i HAVE to be scared as well. If he’s having a breakdown and cutting himself, then I have to do that as well.

I constantly feel like I need to be equal to him.

He *has* been sent to a mental hospital in the past, and for some reason, I can’t get that word out of my head, mental hospital, mental hospital.

My brain makes these weird connections, that ALWAYS links back to mental hospitals.
A connection would look like this:

School = teachers = overwhelmed = bad thoughts = depression = suicide = attempting = hospital = mental hospital
(I can’t look or hear the word ‘school’ without thinking about this connection)

I’m so scared that this might get too overwhelming for me, and I might attempt JUST to get into a mental hospital, so that me and my partner are *equal* in *everything*.


I don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to make these bad thoughts and connections go away. I’m desperate, please, please help me and give me advice on what to do.",2.8482428355957765,4.647407323529414,4.03921568627451,87.06570135746607,75.43790849673202,7.452790346907995,24.841126194067375,8.263242389622931,1.4980441427853188,1195,40,245,21,26,390,150,306,0.19699999999999998,0.716,0.087,-0.9888,0,0,1,0,0,1,56.0,0,0,0,3,16,22,1,7,8,0,33,9,5,4,1,45,55,24,1,7,11,0,4,2,2,4,1,1,0,2,17,13,2,0,9,1,0,2,13,15,2,0,5,7,32,7,35,42,5,21,0,5,2,1,19,9,0,9,12,165,49,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117847861953908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763886300196737,0.0,0.0,0.0634519304846409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678367545525744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766495770684311,0.07174729054314184,0.15581482354936266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416142262765801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008316727606312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036514545754803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19095262251582293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838582766068585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04717880108852997,0.06665850882184772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14624710200338326,0.08950853550728262,0.053028494000280764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358470624005318,0.0,0.09575985707972046,0.0,0.105163722035797,0.1105691934621034,0.06254168654227793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716483739613564,0.10255812690884084,0.0,0.10525431181483053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911701322807714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15670868807383284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421317176241959,0.0,0.12456623685787173,0.09459860943027963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939969429251564,0.5641888005776882,0.19796787269108065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918592642847136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890720484889522,0.06468729563681905,0.0,0.0,0.2048460387648045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928215659971188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059774826002757436,0.09593509218797397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.280249624871416,0.1888632440854454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183225416907263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451505649863019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206266677525108,0.0,0.0879407028585666,0.0,0.07015521957247256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06198899627124663,0.059787330563198,0.09167361164120462,0.148150602956083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334929906608264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16778832036136695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899445770129486,0.0,0.06792857607578708,0.09475774419948477,0.0,0.06628258524230612,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TatjanaGD,2020/02/08,"I don't know what interests me. Help. I truly don't know what interests me. I've rarely been in a position where I had to only think about myself ... I had to work constantly, didnt have time for friends or time and money for any extra activities. And now that I'm older it's very hard to not understand what interests me, because I don't feel happy at all, I Just do things to please others.. I would really like to get a hobby or something. But I don't know where to begin.. Any advice?",0.8350675067506721,3.0408143069306948,3.295859585958599,87.78674167416744,84.14851485148516,6.841044104410441,19.082808280828086,8.00094639256281,0.8869326732673266,379,10,80,8,11,131,64,101,0.10099999999999999,0.757,0.141,0.7079,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,2,0,11,0,0,0,1,15,20,5,0,1,5,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,6,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,4,2,12,6,11,15,2,10,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,7,55,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265245242405123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3152809431083267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14131076844225465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25050699514065305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721138181534448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17909778787325414,0.0,0.12111248072441075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467687517955837,0.20765849684569726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15537905439620694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3821943169609671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325189426565314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763038771339595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544605491136536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850504446706553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784606131526939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15400594637122955,0.14853611089466467,0.0,0.0,0.2703435042277536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24132502204424824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912696170048315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687622848162511,0.0,0.0,0.16467297233699446,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway76543231,2020/02/08,"Just looking for some advice I don't know what is wrong with me or if there is anything wrong with me at all. Maybe I am obsessing over nothing but I just don't know and I need to. Whenever I seem to get closer to understanding myself, I think I am overreacting or I am just recreating things and symptoms I read online. I genuinely think I am either overly sensitive or I just want to have a problem but I don't know why since I hate drawing attention to myself and I have never spoken to anyone about all these things. Either way, I feel extremely embarrassed.  I don't want to get in any more detail, I just need advice on how to understand better how I feel and why. I can't afford to see a therapist right now, and even if I did I am not sure what or how to say it.",2.504096153846156,3.9916670250000017,4.476250000000004,84.89144230769233,75.625,7.9230769230769225,23.55769230769231,8.617729084823388,1.4976586538461536,604,18,127,12,13,207,84,160,0.138,0.816,0.046,-0.9298,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,12,8,1,2,2,0,15,1,0,3,4,47,34,16,0,7,16,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,7,0,0,11,1,0,0,7,6,0,0,1,5,26,2,19,33,6,10,0,0,2,0,1,7,0,8,2,100,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29314210564279325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200012541875098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048783277687228,0.0,0.12343114648725652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265628382766148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906871123842306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168155141635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15672990700768674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480866596939518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24729606477330365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12595602462881736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068774768935894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22243525512985798,0.11568355569567085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439219647109175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435226808904034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003321065186995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12809287837710726,0.0,0.11928015209933525,0.0,0.0,0.11952469894326005,0.13654764839125466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407544567393687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14136626974900576,0.15589976386745996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17415299310228086,0.19929686444386915,0.19221842958346774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122952154674149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17693906751329966,0.1190571605858366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706900203166098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3279867686020392,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GhostOfLostTime,2020/02/08,"I need a bit of help dealing with a few compulsions! 
I have the need (?) to double- and triple-check a few things, like if I looked the door, closed the fridge, flushed the toilet, left the lights on or if friends take their meds properly. 

I also often tap on stuff, like on screen when I watch YouTube/Netflix or on my locker at the gym (usually five times). 

If I don’t follow those compulsions, I start to feel worried or anxious.


It’s not explicitly bad, but it is awkward and annoying for myself and others and it’s also quite inconvenient, but I do feel like it doesn’t warrant seeing a psychologist.


What is the best way to manage/fix this?",5.3223809523809535,5.8867080238095255,5.723928571428572,82.07732142857144,67.96825396825396,8.839682539682537,30.035714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.2186380952380955,505,18,101,8,8,162,83,126,0.095,0.755,0.15,0.7868,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,2,4,8,1,1,11,0,6,0,0,0,1,21,15,15,0,5,9,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,10,6,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,3,0,1,0,7,11,5,11,15,5,13,0,0,4,0,4,7,0,7,7,71,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31529453224634063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227042874449842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16459790140018254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20687902272876446,0.0,0.21521828445513785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20323556650212615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993528336484246,0.14083192359507146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15230454141793767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321341592589326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141856862519156,0.0,0.0,0.28892782025398106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655421518990271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21897042983934106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923433865185773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20967531381911733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708955507654004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395318204069825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256702319188081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821955512133592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13096646986117474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149498939257283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21711425514304647,0.0,0.0,0.156475076285142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20019822865838374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bobtheliak,2020/02/08,"Where is you happy place? For me, it's not really place, but a movie. It was recommended to me by someone on reddit nearly 4 years ago, and I've watched it like 7 or 8 times. It's called Lars and the Real Girl. It's a kinda goofy movie. The most amazing thing for me about this movie is how warm it makes me feel. It's set in, I think, Minnesota or other northern state in the winter. But I always feel so warm watching it. If you watch it my favorite scene is when he at the receptionists birthday party. That whole scene is great. 

Anyway that is where I go to feel better, why about you?",1.720044709388972,3.5086384262295134,3.1469299552906134,92.25477645305516,78.672131147541,5.747839046199702,19.2876304023845,6.574015621080383,-0.030190163934426195,456,10,101,4,11,149,79,122,0.0,0.736,0.264,0.9887,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,3,0,1,8,7,0,0,6,0,6,0,0,2,0,17,12,10,0,1,6,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,14,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,8,11,7,12,11,2,17,0,0,3,0,6,9,0,5,6,65,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011653039766121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18882914971685208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20070668222281612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317272968014405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3442373786687936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12897310761215644,0.0,0.0,0.2501980303389024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24157787107884554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086959476541244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148171727285514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4742001863602169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25830314916568764,0.1453811806631873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922823586090684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150766368866118,0.14541159359588976,0.0,0.0,0.13232835951902805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20477467904631866,0.25336623249454343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613951252227275
mentalhealth,Eggmcmuffin098,2020/02/08,"Having a anxiety attack Having an anxiety attack

I took a bath because I wasn’t feeling well and I stupidly stayed in the bath when I knew I was tired. 

Instead of getting out I feel asleep, my head jerked into a “falling motion” and it hit the side of my bathtub right where my temple is. It hurts, I have slight pressure and now I’m convincing myself I have a brain bleed. 

I looked it up on google and apparently the temple is a really sensitive spot. It’s basically as soft as a eggshell and people die from hitting it! Now I’m freaking out and panicking. I want to run to the ER 😩😭",1.625,3.779896833333332,3.846666666666668,85.295,80.66666666666666,6.666666666666668,25.0,7.793537801064563,1.5254999999999996,460,18,92,8,12,158,76,120,0.276,0.6629999999999999,0.061,-0.9764,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,4,1,11,0,8,5,3,0,0,13,19,9,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,5,9,0,0,3,2,0,4,1,7,2,0,4,4,14,2,13,13,0,17,0,1,1,0,0,9,0,0,3,63,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3348226802013575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4979222198347935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334023061538068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244296850296168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22712047299169086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22130328514958075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433441634171815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22459208869498626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342718212962641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18376975824981012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171550253054816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401939542595844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18688742648279588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332534015717381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251523394369326,0.0,0.0,0.2431383323042999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907699237765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967626648461415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heehheheheehh,2020/02/08,I dont know whats wrong with me Whenever im alone or without my friends my heart starts pumping really fast and i feel empty like theres a piece of me missing This has been happening for over a couple months now and sometimes i feel like i cant breathe. Im also worried a lot and maybe im paranoid but please help me figure out whaat is happening,0.02797297297297164,2.3695423378378377,1.966270270270272,94.14562162162164,91.83783783783785,5.122162162162162,22.264864864864865,6.742157984588678,0.6848475675675679,279,11,60,4,10,92,54,74,0.134,0.698,0.168,0.6597,0,1,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,0,5,2,2,0,0,13,12,6,0,0,3,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,2,9,3,6,11,2,6,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,2,6,35,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18366579740254876,0.0,0.14181490440501496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962180383308522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20783554691671455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17933202231767092,0.1266883103840519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700874434929347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136338833833717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21014307922306968,0.11886405406676714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5746573772284258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745879441257246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17327405338470145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15076405507780874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781570552205917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14154727378091309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946608092399547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136054772846645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753890584226553,0.0,0.12551877529556238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709448154688383,0.0,0.0,0.18009251512842586,0.0,0.0,0.1938882150057621,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dampBiscotti,2020/02/08,"Treatment for sleep anxiety? Hi! Over the past few months I've had a lot of problems with sleep. Once I'm asleep I have no problem staying asleep (which actually often causes me to miss classes, etc), but when I'm trying to *get to sleep* I find I often can't because:

1. I feel anxious about today and whether I've been working hard enough.

2. I feel anxious about the coming day.

3. My sleep schedule is already so off-kilter that the seldom times I'm not anxious, my brain doesn't feel like it's actually time for bed.

I've tried melatonin (doesn't seem to do anything for me), limiting screen time, reading, and a whole bunch of other stuff, but it never seems to help. The one reprieve I've had recently is by smoking weed right before bed, but that doesn't seem like a good long term solution (even though it has honestly been a godsend over the past couple of weeks).

Two questions:

1. Has anybody had success with therapy for insomnia? Was it succesful?

2. Alternatively, is there anything else that I could be overlooking?

Thanks so much in advance for any help or suggestions, it really means a lot :).",2.482688303735454,5.075828075117371,3.5334762196366616,86.22394978567054,80.45539906103286,6.333455807307613,26.63176158399673,7.586124646067393,1.6805065931822822,872,37,164,14,23,280,132,213,0.145,0.7609999999999999,0.094,-0.5369,0,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,0,4,10,9,0,0,10,0,19,8,7,1,1,30,33,11,0,3,6,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,11,5,0,1,9,1,0,2,7,3,0,2,6,5,10,6,21,25,9,22,0,1,1,0,5,4,0,9,17,99,21,4,0.0,0.0,0.19874133583506692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11237111965581653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924738812002927,0.0,0.07789910455774689,0.3451142349990637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16759360778848548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207417125429141,0.0,0.08664919948728632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367513020865108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460669934360907,0.0,0.08771689020925097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08130237753715792,0.11267213846497112,0.0,0.06567144805003282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506527960409745,0.0,0.0,0.10521684541510533,0.11356654134053598,0.06725726531721546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544637992128184,0.07274684310836232,0.0,0.0,0.09307009810270812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05320158507659157,0.0,0.0,0.08540955134807562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121901492507996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13650801192637158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949726488667156,0.0,0.0,0.09011568999899792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17314318942099494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092191552295147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127914317383414,0.0,0.07485622212585939,0.0,0.07853700225833737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844483768474747,0.0690021413858399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19441510022625896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19487369739680413,0.0,0.0,0.11407207500819262,0.0,0.1018568156289172,0.0,0.06523443092124839,0.0,0.10054410867203267,0.0,0.0,0.08696163095855014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781045993681177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4076111962334996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853644147737923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657013933025474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375070066530347,0.11645063238622373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000467301340809,0.0,0.17813237976031934,0.0,0.0965222311248247,0.0,0.0,0.13827076547726752,0.0,0.09947238985388654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081681289472148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368873134779435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413291346745671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dqvoo,2020/02/08,"Long time best friend cuts her loses with me for an unknown reason and I don't know what to do So my best friend. Who I have been friends with for so long. And I helped her get out of being bullied by ratting out the bullies to the principal. She appreciated it. 2 months onwards she exposed me to the bullies and told them I told the principal on them. I got in a fight with her and was like what the hell. I would never do that to you. She said I needed more friends. Sorry dude.
I said I forgave her. But ever since then everything seemed off. She wouldn't talk to me. I tried to say what was wrong. She only got mad. Now 3 months on she is having her 18th. She said to me that she was having a surprise 18th and she found out from one of her friends. And she didn't know who else was going. I wasn't invited. But on the day of the 18th (today 8/2/20) I learnt that she had set up the party and didn't invite me. I don't know what to do because she is legit my only friend. Because my other friends were the bullies that were bullying her and I stood up for her against my former friend's because it was the right thing to do. Now I don't know what to do because she is my only friend and she legit invited everyone but me to her 18th. She even invited the bullies. I legit don't know what to do. I'm legit a massive mess. And I want to know what I should do for advice by the users of reddit. Because I'm not in a emotional state to do anything. And how should I ask her why didn't she invite me. Because I would want to know.",0.4992710212919533,2.5045204355828226,2.338368819920607,95.37533381450744,83.9079754601227,5.062287982677733,20.017683146878387,6.2272716619740125,-0.05393294839408158,1186,34,272,10,34,392,127,326,0.086,0.8079999999999999,0.106,0.6659,0,0,0,0,1,0,33.0,0,1,2,3,7,20,4,0,17,0,37,0,0,2,2,42,62,18,0,8,4,0,0,1,9,5,0,4,0,0,17,17,0,0,10,0,0,1,11,7,0,1,22,4,61,13,41,34,3,28,1,1,0,0,50,12,1,1,14,201,78,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480736920171644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141840499632268,0.0,0.08113424177518691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31742773684149983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182155456144756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05597051266360347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07249950245785278,0.09762382874318284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057322074233669425,0.07850391867241162,0.0,0.08292881231499159,0.07799866736637442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515759750828737,0.6034636224608485,0.0,0.04534268817986963,0.0,0.0493231202909004,0.0,0.13882317599418548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817157712425754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3338715202071534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04239980303229035,0.0,0.0,0.1536077402902876,0.0,0.09709258796479336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13854530233083995,0.0,0.0,0.06435154978474046,0.06693557717979283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05880919856235725,0.1980165465517361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923161370717048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411572626059536,0.247663275435872,0.06901660118285302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900773452759695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179120247542485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715107544416007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975619959701716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057657506166075276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05060626758007453,0.0,0.08226404198328867,0.1658576246299832,0.0,0.05892275760582745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237858387421828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783118769030894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12330215997010267,0.0948880916206754,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Renstarbog,2020/02/08,"""AVPD"" and how I'm tired AVPD or Avoidant Personality disorder is something that stops me from living a life.  
Mental health in my country is not taken seriously(Russia), so I cannot officially confirm it, but through years of research and fact checking - it fits.   
In Google short tearms:

 ***Avoidant personality disorder*** *is one of a group of conditions called anxious* ***personality disorders****, which are marked by feelings of nervousness and fear. People with* ***avoidant personality disorder*** *have poor self-esteem. They also have an intense fear of rejection and being negatively judged by others.*

I feel tightness in my throat and big pull to leave/escape in almost any social environment. Like its intense cold grip around me. I'm so tired of being shamed by family for this.  Recent years are filled with parental pressure on telling what are my life plans and I'm tired of it, because I know they'll reject them. I'm tired of shame and loneliness...",3.0400175953079187,5.8658655999999985,3.5064125122189616,79.40348973607037,99.06060606060606,6.250244379276638,25.92864125122189,7.359569317364363,2.2633597262952105,764,34,122,17,31,238,107,165,0.272,0.696,0.032,-0.9936,1,3,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,3,1,5,12,0,9,3,0,12,8,1,1,1,24,20,13,0,0,3,1,4,1,0,1,7,0,0,4,9,10,0,5,3,0,2,2,3,11,0,1,1,5,11,1,23,16,0,15,0,2,0,0,12,9,0,2,5,73,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110112066191089,0.0,0.0,0.08865544491117508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538923333965811,0.0,0.0,0.12524129452162705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986897307395098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757979337710354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320140355861083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5082249169433574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450981754166863,0.24949873271631134,0.1121092334553777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783998349316985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060926267344067774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566087054753978,0.054161050133741014,0.0,0.09789223142066054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172174171719076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751222346300816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309794220754175,0.0,0.0,0.07685700951298957,0.3871979485767553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094617930782486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565212687308984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300875612409915,0.0,0.08534615936037887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268470071257078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689733838604846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5096733185823332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278160718430838
mentalhealth,Jambinai,2020/02/08,"Very Paranoid, i'm sorry Hey you, thank you first of all for listening. Last night something happened that would either render me insane, paranoid, full of shit, crazy, or something else. Idk since i can just tell you what happpened.
I'm not doing well, overall. I'm drinking a lot and often times question my existence. I'm not really happy at all, but i know what would make me happy... but seem to just flat out ignore it.
Last night was a gamechanger. It was either me talking shit or someone else.... and someone else did.  I saw that Person typing on my pc, even sending their message to a close friend. I saw them fucking tylping. Making typos and hitting backspace. On my PC.. that i'm using all of the time...
my question is am i allowed to be paranoid over  this shit or should i just accept that there are people on my pc.
It just scares me to death. I saw him typing on my pc in editor without ever allowing such b/s.
qthank you",2.338907103825136,4.61559373770492,3.4635245901639347,88.33878415300549,78.8360655737705,5.159562841530055,24.374316939890708,6.139981653823899,0.7482546448087428,726,26,137,5,18,234,109,183,0.19699999999999998,0.755,0.048,-0.9765,1,0,3,0,0,0,36.0,0,4,2,1,10,12,4,1,4,0,12,5,3,5,4,39,30,8,1,3,14,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,1,10,5,1,1,5,1,0,1,3,6,1,1,6,4,24,6,17,19,7,19,0,0,3,1,17,10,4,8,8,95,34,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760090668418025,0.0,0.0,0.3264355385093647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603260039299239,0.11782365440747622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079535333893856,0.0,0.0,0.10063515936915328,0.12041921037560822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518460368261454,0.2773190329056449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158507549438288,0.2123514104630652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073865965237076,0.0,0.0,0.17389325913582462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444721280739365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090302837644551,0.11373417242028043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918321819625716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344507765580357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040858654737786,0.0,0.0,0.1185798131599338,0.0,0.0,0.4011165283349467,0.10774878468498952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207303073586556,0.20055426098783385,0.0,0.1458104885975589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469452344658857,0.11384914234772042,0.11992186314534245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15190618463489244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249902346666736,0.0,0.1074745177946032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711543436065575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556175760708485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850596929388472,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GoodHotdogs,2020/02/08,"Is there a mental health disorder where someone would resume normal activities and hobbies without significant mania for a month or so but then go back to being anxious and a mildly depressed? For example, I always have about a month of time where I really feel good about myself and get back into boxing or lifting weights but it always seems to end with me losing my drive and landing myself back on subreddits to see if I can relate to someone. I have bad depersonalization and dissociation and relatively mild anxiety, and i say this reluctantly because I dont want to self diagnose.  It always seems to land me back in a depressive hole.",11.203333333333326,9.067453435897438,11.286427350427351,55.82246153846154,57.37606837606838,13.804444444444444,42.2034188034188,12.340626583579946,5.390385982905982,520,22,80,13,5,176,80,117,0.214,0.752,0.034,-0.9613,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,10,5,0,0,5,0,7,3,0,0,0,21,14,14,0,4,6,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,3,9,1,0,3,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,0,4,11,1,16,12,0,18,0,3,1,0,2,7,0,5,9,63,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636933633378408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145738841556818,0.16459552201706282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4481263188574566,0.1216504532296837,0.08881520596857764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509762844401761,0.14787883378349606,0.0,0.0,0.16698075867445838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17075515883549575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290438131229699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366850476116002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612038374343376,0.0,0.0828026523057742,0.12220327297786872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15486851738178894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16299706416181034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14682775732105696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325870388945234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275159049838534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333687911480702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586366793838825,0.0,0.0,0.11610121034440635,0.2652731592393785,0.15199317659378425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24689626510852855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495677390667754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859355433526617,0.0,0.0,0.17741902995051007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044618233272252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034985805879657,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dastardly-bastard-,2020/02/08,"I don't have a reason to be mentally ill. I feel so guilty for my mental illnesses. I have anxiety, ocd and depression, but I dont have a reason. I know a chemical imbalance is a reason, but when you tell that to people, they write you off  as if that's not a 'real reason'. It's less tangible and others dont seem to get it. I feel bad because there are people who are way less fortunate and less privileged than me and here I am acting like my life sucks. I cant enjoy anything anymore. I cant  leave the house without having a panic attack. My mind obsessed about every little thought in my brain and I'm exhausted.  Is it wrong that sometimes I wish I had a 'reason' to be  mentally ill? Not that I wish something bad would happen to me, just wish people would understand and care. I know its petty.",1.694670245398772,3.8042913619631946,3.8751495398773024,85.42474884969327,80.16564417177915,7.0197852760736215,22.45743865030675,8.07648339933343,1.3566935582822088,624,20,124,12,16,214,95,163,0.223,0.599,0.179,-0.732,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,1,0,6,13,2,2,8,0,19,6,1,5,0,33,34,12,0,6,7,0,2,1,0,2,5,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,12,0,0,1,8,9,0,0,2,2,22,4,12,28,3,6,0,1,0,0,6,3,1,2,2,90,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129509330565575,0.0,0.10538977304639437,0.0,0.0,0.08744990112496404,0.0,0.0,0.12089573291775067,0.0,0.0,0.17745947732256548,0.06478027664936785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863076436256464,0.0,0.0,0.10834779375166002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152888270178164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490917249594329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953577439062771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746506899869422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05552089266448674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939728624105336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261955347848835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680475054838692,0.0,0.0,0.11252297217618748,0.0,0.0,0.07506056736356402,0.05191740956806104,0.10650893072855548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212808877264592,0.0,0.10730086706933492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468315981783355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210195425241452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209567908706614,0.0,0.5463084618254099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674282942753364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181066466828757,0.10510224008748834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288333203697437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436529967663964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062923132308576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08435096989498758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666105088313997,0.10243901870902823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15098015278323818,0.11618789625155942,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kyothepup,2020/02/08,"I (22m) feel like my (19m) boyfriend don’t love me anymore My partner wants to take a trip to our home town without me going and I can’t help to feel sad for not being with him and not seeing my friends and family (our home town is 5 hours away and I don’t drive). I don’t really know why he decided to go but I’m worried about why. He doesn’t see eye to eye with his dad so it’s really weird to me that he wants to make this trip alone. I can’t help to feel like he wants out off our relationship, I can’t help to feel like this is my fault. I’ve been so anxious about this I have to sit down sometimes when I’m working. I can’t concentrate on anything but this (especially because he leaves on Valentine’s Day and I’m required to work so he can’t take me to work) . I want to take him out the day after but I’m gonna be alone at home trapped.",0.3644009855250978,1.7604446701570673,2.506947951955656,97.10028641823223,81.35602094240838,5.960086233446258,20.659377887280566,6.794906146795322,0.04165635971666193,656,18,169,7,17,222,95,191,0.136,0.753,0.111,-0.7037,0,3,0,0,0,0,16.0,3,0,0,4,6,8,0,0,2,0,15,3,2,1,0,27,38,12,0,4,6,1,4,3,2,1,0,0,3,1,6,9,0,1,6,0,0,5,12,3,0,0,1,8,23,5,28,34,0,21,0,1,4,1,20,10,0,0,8,88,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521942226672589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754374972567354,0.12074407881010715,0.0,0.0,0.10019053507896312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11438888498430028,0.0,0.0,0.07421815801471089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15703838842939866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477581929133457,0.0,0.2462434520055335,0.2609363888936925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406436655175457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13838757149403774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448209857991072,0.0,0.3663779399598312,0.0,0.11990001379057345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691105596840383,0.0,0.0,0.1289165184406278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844387395377473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988485103829104,0.0,0.08126960483179428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559933609835585,0.0,0.0,0.13071479591274374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19403924994755795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041465498417893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27462435000173857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28724710666704434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21972232088807964,0.0,0.0,0.11736342712103524,0.0,0.2659080987136764,0.12364384796549675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crumbly-toast,2020/02/08,"My boyfriend has SEVERE anxiety and needs help badly, please help I'll try not to make this too long, b/c if I went into everything, this would be a whole novel. And by help, I'm asking those of you out there who have severe anxiety, what has helped you better manage your symptoms? I know there's no way to completely alleviate it, as great as that would be. But me, my boyfriend, his family and his counselors are at a real loss here of how to help him.

It started about a year ago towards the beginning of our relationship, about a year and a half ago. But he has had problems with anxiety/depression all his life. So it started out as him getting dizzy spells, not related to his health or anything. Sometimes random, sometimes caused by things like driving or going out in public. Then his panic attacks started getting more severe as time went on, and more frequent. Sometimes they'd come out of nowhere, but usually were caused by something that was anxiety-inducing. His emotions in general too have become more pronounced, like anger and happiness, and sometimes will get panicked because of it. 

He's okay with leaving the house, but needs me or someone in his family to go with him. He's hesitant of trying new things, including therapies. And there are times where his symptoms will improve for a week or two, but he always goes crashing back down. 

He's tried different anxiety medications at varying doses, they'll help for a little while but he'll go right back to where he was in the first place. And his anxiety has gotten worse over time. It's gotten to the point now where he gets a couple panic attacks a day, the littlest things will set off his anxiety. Nothing really seems to calm him down, either. He doesn't even seem to get very happy anymore, his depression is getting worse as well. He does still leave the house, but will get dizzy/panicy much more and needs to leave.

So like I said, I just need some advice on things we can try to help him. He's miserable and wants to go back to his normal self. What are some types of therapy that have helped you? What coping strategies help in every day life? And what routines have you incorporated in your day-to-day life that help? Thank you to those who respond and hope you're all doing well",5.90417799138217,6.792347756380512,5.854513589658606,80.50498549883994,66.79582366589328,9.03417301955585,30.706082200861783,9.140100540675403,2.542514020550215,1797,66,334,31,28,564,211,431,0.139,0.716,0.145,0.7983,1,0,1,0,0,0,55.0,2,7,2,3,23,23,3,3,15,1,29,8,0,4,2,63,64,35,0,11,16,0,0,3,0,8,8,1,0,1,23,23,0,0,3,1,0,8,4,10,2,3,9,1,36,13,56,44,11,63,0,3,0,0,57,27,0,11,29,222,59,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05934935034505592,0.10767548350513764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05053622467120362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23230980504595486,0.0,0.06023260847538014,0.0,0.0,0.04997957110460703,0.0,0.056778845817546976,0.13818922152860896,0.0,0.14010395261763914,0.050711026833269085,0.03702337454157443,0.06707682248510043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05371500110567355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12478275363486414,0.0,0.05231765828230441,0.0636792894643354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720190859576508,0.0,0.15667570383717835,0.0,0.10462160030534427,0.0,0.0,0.06345494642368728,0.0,0.0,0.05314943876756115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831848303564209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04011476712722383,0.0,0.05117169425003476,0.0,0.05458452820254145,0.0,0.11451074129586634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051660995688467215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22212000893236888,0.0,0.13806796149015493,0.0,0.0,0.06696033897551873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12930666252258252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455825960424924,0.0,0.0,0.407092608032714,0.0,0.0,0.06032336719430665,0.0,0.14015962540965748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03337826149767069,0.0,0.0,0.1929281731517953,0.0,0.0,0.1286963706798909,0.08901587639416482,0.06087223207967569,0.0,0.05374839285791764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04054095519235162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06118392828539537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04464707127831986,0.18013635887408574,0.0,0.05865805492763105,0.0,0.0,0.05950721550200575,0.0582766852086778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251841960936365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06345494642368728,0.06666857961174626,0.0574140237068679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05811500774989827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912950674771606,0.03890827247793295,0.0,0.0,0.06520645320035735,0.0,0.05186719320883389,0.057772709454397116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105813742504966,0.06335964932385843,0.20583913282798647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146040476032292,0.04675662155479105,0.2402731078769193,0.0,0.12896522668688518,0.0,0.0485028952125018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12625343853886367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05591645017776377,0.13891108946993136,0.0,0.16139802782154294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624486288880312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649397884812248,0.0,0.05932908118932548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689080920707323,0.05011257632278136,0.03582296267043441,0.048208462712665316,0.04871779859577308,0.0,0.10921577064789137,0.11260354886986138,0.0,0.06780824289385627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237879138194838,0.08628852845278033,0.0,0.0,0.07822244869756614
mentalhealth,US3RNAM30,2020/02/08,"Need to vent for a little and need some advice I'm a student. I've always been a very worrisome person. I always stress out from the largest things to the smallest. If things don't go my way, I get very sad and worried about the future. i think it mainly has to do with me being a perfectionist and also my health issues. I had to go through thyroid cancer being young, so I think part of it occurs because of this and hormonal issues that come with it. It's difficult to manage my emotions sometimes. I also lack a lot of self confidence. I think of myself really low academically, mentally and the way I look. I also feel like I have no one to talk to and no genuine friends. Usually, I get upset about my grades even though I work really hard. so when I come home with a bad grade and after letting out my emotions, I feel guilty for trying to distract myself from my emotions. I have this mindset where I think I don't deserve happiness because I haven't accomplished anything. On the other hand, sometimes  I remind myself that others have it way worse than me so I should stop and I kind of disregard my mental health even though I know I should be working on being okay. It's weird. Do you have any advice for me? I'm so sorry for writing such a long paragraph. I just don't have anybody to vent to and ask for advice. Thank you in advance!",2.5448698884758336,4.662838237918216,4.003426022304833,85.52475241635689,77.40148698884758,6.237085501858736,24.14289962825279,7.24861992348623,1.1272690260223053,1062,36,203,13,25,351,136,269,0.20800000000000002,0.723,0.069,-0.9867,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,0,4,17,14,0,3,12,1,21,5,1,0,0,35,41,20,0,6,2,0,4,1,1,2,4,0,1,2,14,16,0,2,7,0,0,5,6,8,0,1,2,5,39,6,35,32,5,23,0,2,1,0,8,8,0,3,8,154,53,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845429530444065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23286081843727924,0.1615263578574034,0.0,0.0,0.06600534084293247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987357722432355,0.0,0.09073966474469723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810425345470501,0.11833592406633962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16722026326561326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275443252108857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821678454446436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981547077488247,0.06934095718226721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07498969278791877,0.0,0.10142155109960016,0.0,0.11032489615814532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033240728796991,0.08694829270744632,0.0,0.0,0.20634427307010691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736088230159463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026145680567749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107491074416504,0.05334261756204055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925224927339704,0.0,0.047419484402796835,0.09728140562984428,0.0,0.08589662361517217,0.08150745210081421,0.0,0.0,0.08251845696010895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956308962152576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14394016448563995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577157615201408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510845240731337,0.0,0.0,0.08475060508424348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436052722128038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125660807659018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919931705372948,0.1086527195239764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114799674239749,0.1111839445101418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801458455526361,0.0,0.08936144914160668,0.0,0.0,0.12896707148682615,0.24877308550088575,0.1907254180121444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589857936678209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689984120944496,0.16017227224499034,0.0,0.23112937651786236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413242680754276,0.0985709521463395,0.09891424911594576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nuhpoehoe,2020/02/08,"Confused, suddenly bored. Why am I suddenly bored of being lonely, usually I don’t care about being by myself, although I usually just eat and sleep to past the time but I’m tired of those things like why am I suddenly wanting a friend or just to go out and doing something ?",6.584444444444442,6.292634481481485,7.381851851851858,74.19833333333334,65.29629629629629,10.903703703703703,34.66666666666667,10.504223727775694,3.665711111111112,218,9,40,5,3,73,39,54,0.175,0.6609999999999999,0.16399999999999998,0.3182,0,2,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,2,0,6,3,1,0,0,9,10,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,5,3,7,8,0,9,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,8,29,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25246011551624514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25337208292880953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19130682595573206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072537787026906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209722391477499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363766483962445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477939427089957,0.0,0.0,0.19062621524123305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450448176076235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14438636659254087,0.2845971525225236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5454261394239341,0.0,0.1460498121018146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4468682599121943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jeish_1996,2020/02/08,"So,I feel like I’m going crazy. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety for the past 5 years now. I’ve recently started going to therapy and I’m still a depressed mess but,anyway I’ve been having a pretty rough week. I think it’s because the anniversary of my abortion is next week and I’m not really coping with that very well. 

For the past 5 days I’ve been feeling pretty emotionally numb. Like nothing in this world can make me happy. I literally just bought my first car and it’s really nice yet I feel absolutely nothing. No happiness, nothing. 

I have extreme loss of appetite, I only eat twice a day and today I had a horrible argument with my boyfriend (it was over something so dumb. He didn’t let me guide him somewhere from my phone and he just snatches it and just because I was cursing too much he drops me off home). 

I basically had a mental breakdown outside of my apartments. I was sobbing like crazy I was just so tired of feeling so depressed. I started to get suicidal thoughts. How would it be if I just walked in front of this moving car right now? Thankfully after walking for 15 min or so I rationalized with myself and went home. I’m so freaking tired of feeling this way. Should I consider going on medication?",1.4783333333333315,4.124814273809527,3.261408730158732,85.70616071428573,86.81746031746029,6.165873015873016,25.732142857142854,7.531066641456977,1.7252714285714288,1015,45,192,19,32,337,142,252,0.207,0.667,0.126,-0.9783,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,17,18,1,0,8,0,19,5,0,2,0,33,41,16,1,3,8,0,6,3,0,2,4,0,2,0,10,13,1,0,8,0,1,10,4,10,1,2,13,6,26,8,23,24,1,39,0,5,0,0,6,8,2,2,22,118,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377019655124084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350514248524187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14124193447891845,0.1128937298183912,0.2829466889920019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204984446840016,0.0,0.123177167464934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27684235254414097,0.0782296199714629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931439756061872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05721127686904109,0.0,0.18670079814062546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331379110915905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21968271371044387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060180488844314414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197517394461907,0.0,0.1604942473315978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309471471009439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031367568042824,0.1103541924390256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638533364919235,0.08049797845773794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645865770688613,0.0,0.0,0.31521588423613994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832826630869544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090677582360384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22280970130818495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030202609403086,0.0,0.10812190709177913,0.0,0.0,0.09351574654383828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430146495413783,0.0,0.0,0.15501487170976413,0.0,0.0874499693297871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977951166655912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081649418353944,0.12522727210912635,0.0,0.0,0.07016568824795325,0.0,0.0869338781547934,0.0,0.2517172871429428,0.10379690907611028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035219945662708,0.0,0.08691911208987216,0.17567487360700787,0.0,0.09845717200635663,0.10151122785507878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778844060388285,0.11972534270024847,0.0,0.07051693212882504
mentalhealth,hfotwth,2020/02/08,"Anyone feel better after taking Wellbutrin after 3 days? I was taking Prozac and ended up in the ER for wanting to self harm and contemplating suicide. Told my med management provider I have only been feeling worse since being on Prozac, so she prescribed me Wellbutrin and told me to stay on the Prozac. I went from being severely depressed and unable to do anything to being energetic and hyped up and happy in 2-3 days. I've been spending quite a bit of money on a new hobby and haven't been sleeping very much. The pharmacist said it can take a month to get in your system, but she says a week. My therapist thinks I might have bipolar, but my med management provider disagrees and thinks it might be a personality disorder. Anyone else have any similar effects? I just don't know what to do, this is the first time on any sort of mental health prescriptions/treatment. Thanks!",6.9730909090909075,7.564662703030303,6.792878787878788,75.7493181818182,64.39393939393939,9.266666666666667,32.86363636363636,9.120678840339163,2.8783454545454545,706,27,122,11,10,223,103,165,0.11,0.8220000000000001,0.068,-0.7907,0,0,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,1,0,4,2,5,0,0,9,0,19,6,1,1,0,21,34,11,1,1,3,0,2,0,0,2,5,2,0,2,4,8,0,0,6,0,2,1,2,2,1,1,8,4,13,3,21,20,2,22,0,1,0,0,9,9,0,3,10,80,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18056542359912034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18566055288835465,0.1360303568768007,0.10925181297227794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174171991656368,0.14494171765366073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17124101222370827,0.0,0.11434771504438025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215675260626224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090561436532184,0.0,0.11758772510430478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13425691130880754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292728837358545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936266483328077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141327616441715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14111979651320097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296252252447127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29493730327443674,0.0,0.1337928688537553,0.2816790010836185,0.0,0.0,0.1059693608336394,0.0,0.09759534492302477,0.0,0.0,0.12822236575136256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097148258631908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592265649936992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412087277410119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262870630682891,0.10557767013698496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13849971908384834,0.14998326946444535,0.0,0.10982209734737013,0.0,0.13285787794636988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415066261945811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14522007856317293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994615020308747,0.0,0.0,0.1222294113750734,0.0,0.15414691325853613,0.0,0.17013705629677625,0.0,0.0,0.07741458915482688,0.0,0.0,0.2537195585232436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954255298663113,0.07830646664797879,0.0,0.1064936673719452,0.0,0.0,0.12307170299037305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529581897100432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blacktardheroin,2020/02/08,"feel like im not sane and im loosing control of myself im a really quiet person and it takes me a lot to get used to people and actually open up to them. I dropped out of high school around 3 years ago in the 10th grade. time skip to now, I have a job and I somehow got a girlfriend. we are like the exact opposite to an extent. she's a very social person who doesn't want anyone to dislike her. I on the other hand am quiet and only think people think of me badly. I also self diagnose my self with paranoia and anxiety.  I sometimes can't find any words to say, kinda like they were taken right from my brain. so we will be on a date and all of a sudden ill see her do something that makes me feel like she's losing interest and ill just get sad and anxious. she has a good amount of guy friends, recently she's been getting on her phone when I can't say anything and just snap chatting the other guys. we got in a bit of a fight today because I told her that it makes me feel like im not good enough and that it hurts me when she does that kind of stuff. and then she says that she isn't going to change her personality. maybe 5 minutes after I told her all that stuff she got right back on snapchat, she was just taking to a co worker of ours but its like she didn't even hear me out, I tried to explain to her how it made me feel like I wasn't being interesting enough and she said that was my problem. I just want some help from her or others because I've been dealing with all this stress and panic for my whole life and I've always been alone, and now that I found someone I just want them to help me. but maybe im just crazy and im over thinking everything like I always do. I was feeling really suicidal after I got out of her car when she dropped me off, because she didn't even say I love you back. I said I love you even though I was in a bad mood but she didn't even look at me. now she's not responding to me on texts but it shows her on snap maps on snapchat. maybe im not that interesting. please tell me how I should go about this, I really don't want to leave her and I don't want her to leave me, because I really do love her a lot.",1.989922674280276,3.058141929336188,3.5685242683797287,92.58296960504404,76.17344753747324,6.559338567689746,21.53753271472757,6.937597516519254,0.28798125148703324,1679,40,397,16,36,558,202,467,0.163,0.753,0.084,-0.9896,1,1,1,0,1,0,29.0,4,2,3,3,26,28,1,2,18,0,29,9,2,7,4,78,70,32,1,7,15,0,6,8,2,2,4,9,0,7,23,28,0,1,11,2,0,3,14,9,0,0,23,17,80,18,50,43,12,46,0,3,2,3,69,23,0,6,26,261,103,4,0.0,0.0,0.05972314355208159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054250808446558135,0.0,0.0,0.06338556213065942,0.0,0.04894225033371872,0.1018479213652708,0.0,0.0,0.04161863644442202,0.0,0.04681843748843355,0.06913947355109183,0.0,0.04279301595351759,0.0,0.050363036226492436,0.054481679180108065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411926093281377,0.10220020800663257,0.149229736234566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668154127453575,0.0,0.0,0.06832032290843586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474232178695236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864189095024865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630953280514914,0.0,0.06211751444902872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053557224500105485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647355390704285,0.0,0.1616901806393816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05500332456868945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472479366585368,0.17488742885484354,0.0,0.0,0.055936414093615966,0.0,0.0,0.06710350827328927,0.04728357919771982,0.0,0.0959246617532374,0.0,0.06956363962880899,0.10266463943088723,0.19579145297439485,0.0,0.0,0.12119680983773512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897773922906135,0.0,0.08204320010260746,0.0646619956925277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551671239274758,0.0,0.4627514936059637,0.0,0.06073234148442173,0.0,0.0,0.06373120584171987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12960560163296034,0.0,0.0,0.04322792850171797,0.2391969203144577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05139325050327578,0.06846803040822,0.0,0.1040614476440565,0.16570830954907753,0.057909668078101474,0.08170400625229875,0.0,0.18445326107097115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046545959256784036,0.0,0.07180594161868675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485784495818575,0.16031450984425558,0.0,0.06718009010376784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856089149875125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15682717502437704,0.0,0.0604283976486826,0.0,0.0,0.10453028198564099,0.11643193388213055,0.1946773012239845,0.0,0.0619384676972825,0.04876910661654995,0.0,0.12769154451192158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06238649907706521,0.05185523148547405,0.047115358798572746,0.06052914705355372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701052991459532,0.0,0.14012052673097827,0.06694373190261818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203075637776192,0.0,0.053492188739365926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176449867964786,0.060129466279453286,0.0,0.03568667330996954,0.0,0.058011193707775875,0.11695995672417953,0.0,0.041551319663606576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0528578333765008,0.0,0.05049706191885395,0.18048906051387373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683284973808687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03941130276243339
mentalhealth,poppybottles,2020/02/08,"Overthinking, Dwelling, Can’t Let Go of the Past Hello, I’m F 20 and I guess the title speaks for itself. I was diagnosed with situational depression and GAD. I have a really really hard time of letting go of the past and dwell on things like there’s no tomorrow and I’m not sure how to cope with these feelings. I overthink to the point where I throw myself into a black hole and overwhelm myself. Sometimes my overthinking can affect my everyday life such as homework or meeting deadlines as I just get overwhelmed and I panic which just makes me not want to do whatever it is. I’ve been told by therapists that my mind is like a train and that it needs to be derailed when I start thinking negatively. I don’t look at things positively and I just need help because I’m not sure what to do about these issues I have. Any advice would be greatly appreciate",3.4305357142857176,5.601865267857146,4.511333333333333,82.66700000000003,74.89285714285714,7.813333333333333,26.67619047619048,8.648137234880735,2.067580476190477,687,26,131,14,15,224,109,168,0.122,0.7709999999999999,0.107,-0.3662,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,9,11,0,5,7,0,16,2,0,3,2,31,32,13,0,4,7,0,2,2,0,1,2,1,1,0,11,11,0,0,2,0,0,3,7,6,0,0,3,5,17,5,18,24,0,15,0,3,2,0,5,5,0,2,9,91,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520721272645413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801010744791503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682152769855924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680037675194476,0.16120949611111615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030941432222324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298232000551042,0.0,0.18053393461867526,0.0,0.0,0.17511105875945912,0.17496957435103158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14228082633633762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646065819920797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16577765516279758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248296568599489,0.11218659718600946,0.15519300529509295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337751986106716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060205144637634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16037341009309214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355414339751756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18635323336434165,0.0,0.0,0.30324314656514345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15014605112178553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20350162177653708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17853200602089442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708731077039445,0.0,0.11242096308458424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29939151393031743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18441431733666688,0.21103969876744547,0.10177209659079102,0.0,0.0,0.09261527402070996,0.0,0.0,0.15176923816031526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368227546479137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282854752039445,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DeadmanWilliam,2020/02/08,"I want to be buried in a garbage dump. Apparently theres laws against this sort of thing. It's really fuckin obnoxious. It would cost maybe $20 to drop me off at the dump, to mingle with the rest of the rotting trash. There's absolutely no difference between my rotting meat and all of the rest of the rotting meat at the dump, except that I am probably less diseased. Yet someone - some family member who hasnt heard from me in years, or you tax payers, will have to fork out $600+ just to dispose of my sorry sack of shit when I finally manage to do myself in.

God I fucking hate this world.",4.310764462809916,4.93632142975207,5.326931818181818,83.81039772727273,70.2396694214876,8.694628099173555,28.348140495867767,8.841846274778883,1.9998504132231398,467,16,98,8,8,154,87,121,0.195,0.778,0.027000000000000003,-0.9646,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,5,7,7,0,7,0,7,3,1,0,1,12,11,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,7,0,0,1,1,10,0,24,7,5,13,0,0,0,2,3,8,3,3,4,68,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29759952347259944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685239210084869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120307595944844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633320682959709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2812227487277264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28616232341502673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30710811985128605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18247723780683103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923864741754317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413459122969547,0.0,0.0,0.31885757614483395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18923653267469526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16800733781911073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20234376038424415,0.0,0.0,0.183429068727144
mentalhealth,wowguessthis,2020/02/08,"im scared and I dont know why I dont have good mental heath, I have depression, anxiety and adhd but I wouldn't really consider adhd to be the bad parts of my mental health it just is what it is. for the past few weeks ive been feeling scared its different to anxiety like something is looming over me like im going to die, death scares me in this context but when thinking about ending it myself, it seems like a peaceful way to get out of what may be causing these issues now rather than earth or whatever it is choosing that its my time to go. I really just dont understand why im scared its like ive just watched a documentary about a murderer and im scared too look round the corner, I live away from family and dont feel close enough to talk to my housemates about this issue which is usually what I'd do but its just sticking to me and I know its not my usual depression or anxiety, for example when my depression gets bad it feels painful and makes me want to hurt myself but im just scared now and I cant sleep because of it. anyway idk whats happening and I would just like to pin point what it may be and get rid of it, any advice may help, thanks. (additional info im on 50g of Zoloft a day which I have been taking",2.087244755244757,3.677253738461541,3.8598601398601424,88.43877622377623,77.0,7.650349650349653,22.97202797202797,8.438071523408619,1.270230769230769,972,29,214,19,22,327,131,260,0.256,0.643,0.102,-0.9940000000000001,1,0,1,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,0,0,16,21,1,6,7,0,26,4,1,2,0,44,45,17,3,4,14,0,4,5,0,5,3,0,0,0,25,12,0,0,10,0,0,2,7,14,0,0,2,6,23,7,27,35,3,22,0,4,3,0,2,8,0,6,16,138,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929633293715525,0.07289294173842134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05072685947422833,0.0,0.17119390509947982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008404561442977,0.0,0.12456668532887955,0.04547215205774455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662916222151754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048107320826726564,0.0,0.19274455839784507,0.0,0.07741737741323385,0.07793543965998616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3496970800229439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606864025643189,0.0770761219533979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703211134171949,0.0,0.11315175415630893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169177381235786,0.0,0.0847876161603415,0.06256637869836945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596372398905137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792905302030562,0.0,0.0,0.04999916188963409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798550204113131,0.0,0.4834495585852609,0.15571468293308588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199043987958954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18221567307447664,0.0,0.06586836404771174,0.0,0.06264064416634421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049792448740800986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15034754543186793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937387227064639,0.0,0.0,0.08077864043618989,0.07120894907798646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051597129035297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557437183009884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4480930124576329,0.0,0.0,0.0679080868091381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464843235537942,0.0,0.0,0.05742653746104099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056085826506064716,0.05995628258465245,0.0,0.06867664972455115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04779718272799759,0.0,0.0,0.04349668842502751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765556877725749,0.0,0.0,0.16431074072483856,0.0,0.04399780478896425,0.059209690474832787,0.0598352574041556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461997782163926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05298983595130961,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayaccount1744,2020/02/08,"What should I do? I feel like I'm spiraling lately and I don't know what to do about it. I used to care about so much; grades, video games, friends. Now it seems like I'm not caring or gaining any joy out of the things I used to love. My grades are slipping this semester, but I find myself not having the energy to care whenever I get another bad grade. I still play video games for hours a day because it's what my friends are doing, but I don't even like it that much. I feel like I'm just passing the time until the next day when the cycle repeats. I have so few friends right now and I'm starting to get the feeling that most of them don't actually care about me. This has resulted in me spending more and more time alone because I'm so bad at meeting and connecting with people and it sucks. I've always envisioned my future being happy with me having a wife and kids someday, but the thought of that just seems so unrealistic to me. I'm worried that there's something going on with me mentally but I don't know what to do about it. Any advice?",3.7260244648318057,4.496019064220183,4.746807339449543,86.9157767584098,71.66055045871559,7.831681957186544,26.918654434250765,8.021203637495839,1.4527256269113151,828,27,179,11,15,271,109,218,0.10099999999999999,0.7040000000000001,0.19399999999999998,0.9688,0,1,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,1,16,18,1,0,9,0,16,1,0,3,0,33,42,17,0,1,9,1,3,4,3,1,0,0,0,1,17,10,0,0,9,5,1,2,6,3,0,0,1,3,22,15,23,39,6,22,0,0,0,1,10,5,1,4,19,118,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.1184950383188444,0.0,0.0,0.11865686116100176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576154178796906,0.0,0.0,0.10103682280511657,0.0,0.0,0.16514877238366518,0.12732658456010576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20277260779783096,0.14804129740764138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4952108508294805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566204779784838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08020125453517178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841911118257432,0.1734946567704286,0.0,0.0,0.11098189306900197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814421275732048,0.0,0.1268809799589089,0.0,0.0690096472921401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926108384447327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958093595661795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346598462487316,0.0,0.13697471654163765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23729199898607264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959242554854036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236965197690287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17852533539512522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913877668184714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418205231616875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369782158709252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210847919168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348028108022108,0.0,0.0,0.08594651223989139,0.0,0.09697159732458432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067056870688934,0.0,0.0,0.09639931369786824,0.14160988420340895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097475323259755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12331480704261855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sting_TQR,2020/02/08,It started in 2017. I went to do a xerox on the day before my exam and the shopkeeper said “and now you remember to do it?” Ever since then that phrase stuck with me. It has affected my performances a lot. How do I get rid of it. Because of it I can’t study anymore. Everytime I want to study that phrase runs in my mind and I feel guilty. Like I did something wrong. It gives me anxiety and makes me feel guilty for no reason and I can’t concentrate anymore. Please help me.,0.3398639455782302,2.655704244897961,2.2847959183673474,93.22746598639458,88.18367346938776,6.1238095238095225,20.41156462585034,7.492282038375204,0.7580176870748301,368,12,81,7,12,122,62,98,0.16,0.752,0.087,-0.7506,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,4,1,17,17,7,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,4,3,15,1,10,13,1,10,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,6,55,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686654801151234,0.0,0.4373109359321526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440167196777178,0.0,0.1876109990748392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14219041897976012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19943546264570813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22296114957541494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519093756946824,0.21150310640648595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14778211830441862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077146781566128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18744297086693326,0.0,0.0,0.14717113792272016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22262047468194887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420192291621983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22668866042946495,0.0,0.0,0.24975920682497815,0.0,0.2097255812286924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823821271817567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.169735152193424,0.0,0.0,0.15605584586350327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300439556728941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20438581605547088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410586728912955,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunnnydayhappy,2020/02/08,"Where do I start with my Mental Health? Hi there. I have been sober from alcohol for a year. In the past I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression.  The more I hear from people I feel like it's so over diagnosed these days and I'm not sure what to think. 

I have been feeling ok mentally.  I have good and bad days. I just don't know what's normal and not. I have trouble socializing these days with most people outside my network, I get sad quiet often, anxious,  extreme happiness, but also feeling overwhelmed with any kind of emotional.  I also have been told by friends and family I seem like a sociopath because I don't show much emotion, especially when I'm not comfortable in situations.  I have had some paranoia like people are talking about me, or that people think I have relapse which is not the case. I don't know if I'm just awkward.  I'm not sure if its adverse affects to the damage done to my brain from drinking or what. 

I am not on any kind of medication and would like to stay off of any of at all possible. I don't know who I should see to help me. Any advice would be great.",3.114338383838384,4.790017231818184,4.409393939393941,85.21853535353536,74.4090909090909,7.616161616161617,27.222222222222207,8.344100000000001,1.832237373737374,861,33,175,15,18,284,123,220,0.126,0.7070000000000001,0.166,0.8467,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,10,22,0,2,6,1,25,7,1,1,3,43,43,15,0,6,13,0,3,4,1,3,5,2,0,0,10,10,2,0,9,2,0,0,10,8,0,0,7,6,24,14,25,32,5,15,0,4,1,0,8,7,0,8,11,121,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643516699890143,0.0,0.1164021405120263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17420624782793148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962767933742731,0.0,0.08332334811347507,0.12304837008931065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094348258749554,0.06639649851742006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12159051763167017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107327789473816,0.0,0.09381246328266897,0.2211026064959526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146277053028134,0.0,0.1066999368259436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450402273566227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267989288958447,0.0,0.1652193691546054,0.07781232617354428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084151166525282,0.0,0.056906099482046675,0.0,0.0,0.09135675974190258,0.0,0.12008446292548325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594715139799472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11577665302462925,0.1227605295303477,0.0,0.07300664534332132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22684641927031698,0.17957841910565397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21285084817233135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972523855515724,0.21953107837711397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006858474257411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067182771634706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397627268398263,0.3020450973980925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227907078794531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679497791437149,0.09915649427407842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243041764414073,0.0,0.11103001849353727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709399434402446,0.116094013500674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20531124310175775,0.0,0.0,0.0875456086328752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958281842945433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407753560628123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474700030522254,0.0,0.0,0.07014077948438753
mentalhealth,one_lifedown,2020/02/08,"Having trouble staying afloat Some days ago my significant other expressed displeasure from my sexual performances. I wrote her off hoping that I would get another chance to really go for it and at least buy myself some time to get better.

2 days later, I woke to her asking me if we could have an open relationship. I reacted poorly, I got mad and just started ranting and raving. I was insulted by the thought. I said some really mean things, including doubting her faithfulness because of the timing of the message. We've been fighting about this for close to a week now and she admitted she doubts whether she wants to continue a relationship after this. This was after I finally mustered the courage to contact the national crisis line for some advice, and using it.

I've had suicidal thoughts before, but never like this. I've always hoped somebody would do the work for me, until today I've never seen that someone as me. I'm afraid to come forward and get help at the moment because I have work in the morning and want to keep up my professional image. I also don't know if someone would be able to find this on a background check. On top of that, I wanted to marry this girl, have kids and settle down. She doesn't know that I wanted to marry her because I came to that conclusion days before the fighting started. We don't live together, I live with my parents while trying to get my life together enough to move forward.

My fear here is that I'll wake up in the middle of the night and terminate all of the indiscretions going on in my brain. I feel like a coward, I feel helpless. I have guns but I've disassembled the firing mechanisms and attempted to hide them from myself. I'm truly hoping just writing this down is enough of a deterrent so that I scare myself away from the thought once I read this aloud.

If you're reading this, thank you and I believe my moment of crisis will simmer down momentarily",6.248124629783202,6.9377895831062695,6.773642933301744,74.91923942660827,65.97547683923706,9.543371638431466,31.76033645302689,9.54385415503706,2.974892287643644,1535,58,269,29,23,502,194,367,0.138,0.774,0.08800000000000001,-0.9678,2,0,0,1,4,0,30.0,2,1,1,7,7,20,4,5,20,0,21,3,2,2,3,62,58,22,1,14,8,1,3,2,0,4,1,1,0,2,20,18,0,1,11,2,3,7,5,11,0,0,13,5,46,9,51,39,8,51,1,1,1,0,29,22,0,12,27,192,66,5,0.09767745131455484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544927494824418,0.08658516707018328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811262252635834,0.08127546427119041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242332435718204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131523149241136,0.0,0.09177118085510083,0.0,0.0,0.17862980313608173,0.0,0.16623263356891474,0.11004903886494832,0.0,0.08638776801383778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904033953969752,0.0,0.11171698273391087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414047535487396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798749678812067,0.0,0.0,0.1889816263318664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018538360730344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099142886767996,0.09877730852733513,0.0697807907359956,0.0,0.10700087347899384,0.08927542092527042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20412974729489824,0.0,0.1110246931196208,0.0,0.0781215808212414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547113666383925,0.0,0.0,0.2910472462288506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682020673616643,0.0,0.0,0.10736194551288683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899247252888911,0.09544053766729907,0.0,0.17250195808923433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639937960762327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381567256847106,0.0,0.0,0.15066974415530285,0.0,0.0,0.0916636712066924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402329780284987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845925033778883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954077684401765,0.0,0.12514935297238006,0.0,0.0,0.20973805589227332,0.0,0.0,0.09291362411142463,0.0,0.09779216873502344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16552357504702414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827320556704956,0.10411116670287536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068432780462554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992827379098317,0.0,0.0,0.06489255840239434,0.0,0.0,0.2326349569997049,0.1139130147255455,0.0,0.09258680272159538,0.0,0.0,0.06631657772628492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843619563454191,0.0,0.0,0.2304507660832937,0.0,0.07835095963149834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14222069577965282,0.0,0.0,0.20816177673261416,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fr0oger,2020/02/08,"Hey can you give me some reason to live I have to finde something even a little thing to stay alive im only 14. My parents are divorced my family uses me for whatever personal gain they want,  im always tired and feel hallow and have had a rilly tuff week.",1.8213207547169823,3.81794132075472,3.9062641509433966,85.9363773584906,79.18867924528301,6.504150943396226,20.033962264150947,7.554174236665415,0.7482633962264154,202,5,40,3,5,69,43,53,0.054000000000000006,0.812,0.135,0.5267,1,0,1,0,1,0,3.0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,2,0,8,9,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,7,0,4,8,1,3,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,1,1,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892107587482104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019217550445113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21436765791645015,0.0,0.11497768521630004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078348033112855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21813789206759654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4912509892527906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279094113861567,0.20079384761623312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729440552066583,0.0,0.0,0.25249510702517625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985524406674989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23379981212509635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750596903200414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423726892569117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510710559765068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261356966687455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19639616842223612,0.0,0.0,0.1341233934980501,0.0,0.18240245876738886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,getfuckedrogerstone,2020/02/08,"Trouble being away from family/new job I started a job about 1.5 hours from home. I dont like the part of town its in as theres not much and it seems crime ridden. 

I worked all week then came back to visit my parents but my mom shamed me. After I went through hell all week she scolded me for not “starting my own life” despite having discussed I may need their support early on in this job as ive never been able to work full time to this point. 

Im already scared for Sunday when I have to go back to my temp housing (still looking for an apartment which is FREAKING me out). I feel pressure now to stay next weekend and Im scared. I don’t know why it scares me, but it just does. 

Also... apartment searching. Ive had to break leases before cause of my anxiety. I look for monthly rentals but everything is so expensive! My first week I barely made it through so I am really frightened to commit over 1,000 dollars (rent is getting insane in my area) to a monthly apartment that I may not last 1 week in!!!! 

Im scared and hate life. Had to vent, sorry. Cant see my therapist for about 1 week and she is sick of me anyways!",1.6405194805194796,3.628068787878792,2.9101948051948057,92.89957792207794,79.73593073593074,5.23896103896104,23.91991341991342,6.1124844417494595,0.49077316017316,874,31,186,6,22,282,143,231,0.242,0.731,0.027000000000000003,-0.9953,6,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,3,13,12,2,6,4,0,18,3,0,2,4,25,34,14,0,1,7,2,1,1,0,2,3,0,2,0,9,6,0,0,3,1,3,5,7,10,0,1,6,4,30,2,35,25,6,47,1,0,3,0,7,15,1,3,26,124,39,5,0.0991954512307076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946464708423899,0.07932656651086742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588424868160168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319739174582793,0.15255035805324904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440802290712658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345317023819768,0.0,0.10190105305854316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680660783834186,0.0,0.11625633007321795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915047540654117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05015620063206848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437560014282014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05182552912677834,0.0,0.0563750608944818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979349715926241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950112548712586,0.0,0.09768753806022246,0.11445823248401656,0.0,0.0,0.3214443280621732,0.0,0.2953085377117745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05451522581123352,0.08085753219353878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012936152451744,0.04846188691554428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16659839204201998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386113440016663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617651360121715,0.15835372558508728,0.0,0.07292007022947253,0.07355217018657102,0.07650564719471482,0.09580358492459837,0.10549548773171606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014480960149804,0.10741900715670064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377176421635504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354714610308683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39724780587327535,0.0,0.07904593175250889,0.0903038132798354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110411864015698,0.14042210187456078,0.10572915263717853,0.0792176154888311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256582253732704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151735643675872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05784166532131337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3978430379994632,0.0,0.0,0.0919551770875656,0.08950846587026083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14443093981615476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Animatecorpses,2020/02/08,"Sinking Ship That’s just what it is. My mental health, my sense of stability, & the never ending feeling of loneliness. How can I explain to my amazing support network of friends that I feel so completely alone at the end of the day. 

I wish my mom were still around. I wish my dog were still here. They were my sources of unconditional love. Without ever feeling like a burden. I wish I had someone I could turn to and just have them hold me as I cried. No words spoken, just comfort. But I don’t feel that sense of comfort with anyone. Except my cat. 

The state of it all is almost comical. I can’t trust my own thoughts or worries because I can’t tell if it’s the over anxious thought process or legitimate causes for concern. I worry. I try. I hold on.",1.4768718348266459,3.920308794701992,2.956236852356838,89.68828593689129,83.56953642384107,5.142345149980524,26.100895987534088,6.522977012572876,1.0352287495130503,592,26,119,6,17,193,98,151,0.155,0.664,0.18100000000000002,0.8082,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,2,0,10,9,0,0,6,0,12,2,0,2,3,32,25,8,0,5,9,1,4,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,2,7,1,0,0,6,1,0,0,6,4,25,8,18,18,2,12,0,0,0,1,7,4,0,4,8,86,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973337520144033,0.14452572343998973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119609973253087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576452443954625,0.0,0.0975725603902096,0.0,0.0,0.12422393732975838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506485886960106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433503490530084,0.0,0.0,0.14630945553375838,0.0,0.0,0.1114147016579498,0.0,0.15328276878187286,0.08999447511354695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24718951291255795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622573242703994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28223099377193145,0.0996904157909968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781151512541473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14832897622381336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817425528585612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259441031078488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062774857578555,0.0,0.0,0.16343249923951425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762510200545199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823536137673915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22288038230472226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583531226403945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196779544226632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215650405239504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947413627395172,0.15178403587512682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4814068850408341,0.13451564457480508,0.0,0.0,0.2834278499661674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bossybitchyhungry,2020/02/08,how do i get my internal monologue to stfu my internal monologue is always going which is great in some cases bc i’m really good at talking myself through problems i’m facing but SOMETIMES i could use some peace and gd quiet. does anyone have some good strategies?,5.073,7.115572900000001,5.569000000000003,77.39950000000002,70.0,7.4,30.5,8.07648339933343,2.487,215,9,34,3,4,69,39,50,0.033,0.725,0.242,0.9159,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,5,1,1,2,0,9,10,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,3,4,9,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,0,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519583312887924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117285605033377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24176545441266836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649870263941822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15820331189746434,0.0,0.17209127416935396,0.5079575682374678,0.0,0.3338439976585169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897438514801281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19398487858266344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994822610321374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433834923472421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615266235099714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IceFoxPete,2020/02/08,"I had my first appointment with a professional Trigger warning: Self harm, alcohol


Well, I was drinking 2 day ago, because I didn't felt well and that alcohol just made it worse. Like always. But I normally keep drinking and eventually find myself in my flat totally disassociated. All I think about in these moments is mostly hurting myself, but not that day. I finally found the courage to contact a professional and got an appointment yesterday (it's no therapy, but somehow like it. In German it's 'beratung' sorry, I don't know the English word). I was surprised to get an appointment that fast and wasn't prepared so I didn't know what to say. Nonetheless I got a new appointment and am like confused. I really think, that this talking helped me, but I never had a therapy or something like that and don't know what or how to say something. Also, it was exhausting and I feel really down today. Some questions and thoughts brought me to the need of alcohol today and the urge to hurt myself again. 
It's weird. Like, I seek for it but don't want to accept it.",4.190582411182295,6.276475623762376,5.4005532906231775,77.50708503203262,72.46534653465345,8.911357018054748,31.684333139196273,9.478462496947786,3.247273966220152,844,40,151,21,17,280,109,202,0.157,0.733,0.111,-0.6721,0,0,7,0,0,3,26.0,0,0,0,1,9,16,0,1,10,0,13,6,0,3,3,46,30,19,0,3,9,0,2,5,0,0,4,2,0,1,17,10,5,1,12,2,0,1,9,6,2,1,15,4,21,10,15,15,4,18,0,2,0,0,7,4,0,7,18,108,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506479818719792,0.3799998634289329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09478398205263447,0.09862186030433863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722514215454432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287696575520746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322177309534112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059929537223661775,0.0,0.11380208578138926,0.12983777196863228,0.10832922543173916,0.10081686024469123,0.0,0.12995597220143165,0.0,0.0,0.06192414771850596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18958970458290128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944445906187432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537658096731801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535000171463917,0.0,0.0,0.1954138599020061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2895253646841295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11215072666994247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788439844980793,0.09141338406012577,0.1144716792050638,0.0,0.0,0.11612882308723535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277454070577788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15185963090702936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885108438971468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364687954440788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18249186714206547,0.0,0.13267844912394836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952654856057918,0.0,0.0,0.2710861396861201,0.0,0.0,0.15189139909541474,0.0,0.09409519603840742,0.0,0.0,0.2246946924490524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990880785331477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131354794693352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078656867919013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bio-Where,2020/02/08,"[Utah] For those who are shy, anxious, and/or introverted, there is a new meetup to help you establish supportive friendships and have a fun social outlet with similar people in a safe and judgement free environment. Utah Shyness and Introvert Meetup http://meetu.ps/c/4xMld/zWz2M/a on Meetup http://meetu.ps/c/4xMld/zWz2M/a",18.498666666666665,18.685965200000005,12.327222222222225,46.75750000000002,41.44444444444445,16.11111111111111,49.16666666666667,14.554592549557764,7.823666666666668,274,12,27,8,2,73,37,45,0.11199999999999999,0.586,0.302,0.8934,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,5,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,18,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4832165634349616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28670042719874617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4131072162589575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29653621958005044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4360199483798615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.485386362429902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigDongo,2020/02/08,"Do I have psychopathic tendencies?  I’ve always struggled with \**diet\** antisocial tendencies. I’ve never had a problem staying within the law, but I’ve always been disruptive and provocative among my peers. I like seeing a good fight and can’t seem to help myself when given an opportunity to instigate drama. I never do any of this to harm any specific person but causing general anarchy gives me weird satisfaction. I’m a psychology student in university and I feel the ease in which people become distraught is like constant bobbing bait. I wouldn’t have any friends if it weren’t for my charisma; I know exactly how to behave to get people to like me, but I always feel the need to introduce chaos.  

I’ve noticed I become very agitated and suspicious when things go well. If I get others on the same page to the point we achieve absolute consensus, I feel as if something is wrong. Perhaps I have natural paranoid tendencies that cause me to provoke others because I know their rage is genuine regardless of how they try to present themselves in public.    


It’s very hard for me to feel guilty about my actions when those effected aren’t people I care about. I only seem to respect people who are genuine with me. If someone behaves in a reserved manner, (watching what they say, having general courtesy, etc) I feel I am unable to trust them. I’m very socially outgoing and very good at breaking the ice but I treat interactions more like a game than something thoughtless and natural.   

I've recently upset some of my friends by instigating some online drama in our community. I was able to rationalize my actions clearly to them but they still remain sensitive. I felt if I was able to logically deconstruct my behavior to them they would feel less effected. I've apologized to them and even though I know I should feel guilty I do not.

I realize this makes me sound like a huge asshole, and maybe I am, but these aspects of my own behavior and cognition puzzle me to a great degree. I haven't studied psychopathy in depth but it seems to be checking a lot of boxes.",6.081084175084175,7.5679627688311735,6.828253968253968,71.50470899470899,66.76623376623378,10.06734006734007,35.55796055796056,10.25414643259724,4.046784511784511,1666,82,275,42,27,550,206,385,0.14300000000000002,0.6459999999999999,0.21,0.9837,2,0,2,0,1,0,37.0,2,0,9,4,11,25,2,3,15,0,25,1,0,9,4,68,50,28,0,11,13,0,9,5,2,3,0,2,0,1,14,12,1,0,18,3,1,3,8,9,1,0,7,13,52,16,44,39,9,27,0,0,2,0,24,13,0,12,14,191,66,2,0.19147870961885088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23898843816374635,0.0,0.0,0.19531813293832845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05836182207126175,0.2114731910558343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976126529217262,0.19670138001662396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346023052007937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067746881680154,0.06323494091226559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33886086106172897,0.0,0.0919247945527902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14793597606804818,0.0,0.10003972278355552,0.09184191299773692,0.054410881652493866,0.16060325698244665,0.0,0.10555297666700512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576365678350058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417207142977198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784753680848002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338670638913957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139417578724649,0.0,0.0,0.0639067627635653,0.0,0.09618305014997863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098951848222904,0.14768018514607198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108999890006702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281409351312397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654944556634936,0.08359591178052624,0.0,0.0,0.09050463598915733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160963267032676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945310627924832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613577764078297,0.0,0.0,0.07629187036705909,0.2614725386994117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09759421548696016,0.0811196446440768,0.14740966546794926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204541370035286,0.07645757242237343,0.0,0.0,0.10008756088934956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360497320278086,0.0,0.09406343000500557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500073741929788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159799774165392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08608117780796044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801049076033272,0.1046759550683997,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Thesaddestsushi,2020/02/08,"Therapy Advice Needed! My partner has had a therapist since July 2019 and just recently, things have changed. She was diagnosed with PTSD a few sessions ago, after her appointments were changed to once a month. She went in this morning with a small list of things that have been bugging her, because she has problems with talking sometimes. Her therapist basically told her all session that all her issues are trauma based and that she's fine. Repeating how she doesnt like it when my partner talks out how she is feeling with me, and how my partner is coping fine. At the end of the session her therapist told her that she basically doesnt need therapy anymore and when my partner asked why, she said it was because she was fine and everything is PTSD and she can deal with it. She was very upset when she came home and feels like she did something wrong. Is this how therapy sessions are supposed to go? Do you get kicked out if they deem you okay after diagnosing you?? I just feel like she was threated wrongly and ignored when she came in with issues and concerns today. And as someone who is always with my partner, I see her breakdowns often. She has a hard time getting herself to do things, has been distant, more irritable, and incredibly anxious. I know she isnt okay and it hurts to know she doesn't have a professional to turn to anymore.",6.048816581750812,7.196737216535437,5.939421028253823,79.09175312644744,66.5984251968504,8.653635942566003,34.626215840666966,8.841846274778883,2.986708012968967,1079,50,193,17,17,338,128,254,0.11800000000000001,0.841,0.040999999999999995,-0.9659,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,3,1,0,11,16,1,1,8,2,31,2,0,4,2,42,50,22,0,4,3,0,4,3,5,0,2,1,1,5,14,23,0,1,5,0,0,4,4,8,0,0,16,6,40,8,23,34,4,23,0,1,1,0,44,6,0,2,16,144,54,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655603472717232,0.08758914515610393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221787493819485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162722839142124,0.195986031922638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237405593580407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046737553720055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226024741839463,0.0,0.0,0.20905585679250208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186882012676614,0.0,0.2005802363359083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875163736136416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880409928749901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988398661373115,0.14117983520037788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032483430562595,0.0,0.0561560270114391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851439419220121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911453401322297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577819937138937,0.0,0.0,0.2062640356424623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10860683588157287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482079420268942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788692371256366,0.0,0.0,0.14653279624754592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522947566163493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454787076597744,0.23100731544771824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756300126688763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939909823431842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873881479164409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173669227770697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372143250471162,0.07606880190468249,0.09772566343728348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588395464716015,0.0,0.0,0.3389937017220957,0.34417824241834355,0.19693501473010108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05761693324376056,0.0,0.09366037137224653,0.18883446938965825,0.0,0.0,0.10747695754336456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152863732389001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159790386809948,0.08916069885176564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21606655072459455,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GilZeAwesomePrussiaA,2020/02/08,"I’m scared of myself I have a problem where when I get really frustrated or angry, I snap out and say things, but I don’t remember what I say, and it feels like I’m not even in control of my own body. But another issue I have is getting random urges to kill people when I get annoyed or frustrated. Like, I get the urge to tear out their throat with my teeth. Honestly it scares me, these urges. And I’m afraid I might kill someone one day, and not even remember killing them. Hell, I’ve slapped my younger brother before and don’t even remember doing it. It like I lose control over my body and thoughts, and everything becomes fuzzy and muffled. And I forget it like it was just a dream.",3.2199084368868536,4.74264428057554,4.1094048397645535,88.10693263570965,73.82014388489209,7.644473512099411,27.74427730542839,8.296473431620573,1.7918287769784174,541,21,113,9,11,174,81,139,0.266,0.5920000000000001,0.142,-0.9722,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,3,7,17,7,3,3,0,8,4,4,2,0,30,17,15,3,1,7,1,1,4,0,1,0,2,0,0,9,12,0,2,5,1,0,0,4,12,0,1,2,3,19,5,9,14,1,8,1,1,0,0,5,5,1,4,7,72,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13134175306023765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13833532244025504,0.10658356212214863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27826217970050343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809703293196909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077970603662803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481910609164395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257194406942936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06333315651476623,0.08948285405415651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617641931632464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073463764722107,0.0,0.0,0.4157313507870513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24477486175941945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012933491016025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287673676268688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487665283091328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868366835222448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11985299896228475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024214951481536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4256716194809504,0.0,0.0,0.1992170694846419,0.2508060533639552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612893428287518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321446735522482,0.0,0.0,0.09943920901219908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LightGreenToast,2020/02/08,"Does anyone else constantly compare themselves to others?  I find that I am largely motivated by anxiety about doing worse than my peers, rather than through internal motivation. Growing up, I was constantly told things like ""person x went to Harvard/got this grade/got this scholarship, why aren't you doing the same?"" I realize that this is a stereotype of Asian parents but I've realized that this way of thinking has been very ingrained in me.

I'm a second year uni student and I was a med school hopeful, I was doing everything right; volunteering, research, high GPA, etc. In retrospect I feel like I was motivated more by competing with my peers than anything else. I decided this year that I want to pursue computer science instead, and I'm starting from ground 0. I feel crushing anxiety about my career because I feel that I'm years behind of everyone else.

On one hand, the motivation is good because it makes me get stuff done; I have a research internship in computer science lined up for the summer and I'm working on catching up to everyone else. On the other, I feel like my way of thinking is extremely toxic. I applied to a leadership program for computer science students at my school with a friend of mine. I know that this is horrible, but my instinct was to want him not to get in, so that I could feel that I am ahead of him.

Does anyone else feel that they are doing poorly if they are not doing significantly better than their peers? I feel like the way I was brought up contributed to a lot of this, although I'm trying to overcome it now.",6.226920606601253,7.12847066440678,6.785263157894738,74.06968777876897,66.08474576271186,10.007136485281,36.204281891168606,10.064110947511567,3.834152542372881,1246,61,217,28,19,408,149,295,0.061,0.7909999999999999,0.14800000000000002,0.9771,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,3,8,6,8,0,0,12,0,25,1,1,5,0,36,50,8,0,6,6,1,8,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,22,5,0,0,18,0,2,4,3,0,0,2,11,8,35,8,44,38,4,31,0,0,0,0,10,15,0,3,13,157,57,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508934916037199,0.0,0.0,0.13791975853690544,0.20210296352418344,0.08115877837505273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024000137285025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722451541304295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21315404177374755,0.0,0.07874287959992718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17261226642648464,0.1009261330103608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4119366046176352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999132820280598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884780568797439,0.08863648745254091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3490692112860781,0.21137005146762936,0.0,0.0,0.09014013797942792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619631008005769,0.0,0.10305346867123796,0.0,0.0,0.08272075457340207,0.1577565247279488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10420119537864413,0.0,0.09795543820719936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542009238487504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19272993943904088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838462153944618,0.0,0.0,0.06583198544626402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954853095691668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682986987433527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095097809595008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611427976821763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422397282604467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199624595710528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980625629928326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290036926698538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06552110432642233,0.12638797718512615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423902843987196,0.0,0.06695891662694696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137475743981787,0.1163414500705701,0.2348483503135873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142501891268834,0.08899241395883171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717991189973732,0.0,0.10050582309078224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905309980905733
mentalhealth,DemonicGamingUK,2020/02/08,"Death can only make me happy! My last post did not really make sense so im going to add some clarification.  


over the last 20+ years the feeling of death would only make me happy,obviously it not fucking legal, being im not terminally ill, i have prayed to the devil over and over again to take my soul so i can be free for once not stuck in a bullshit lie",1.5111428571428576,3.3891602666666683,4.0072380952380975,85.41600000000003,79.66666666666666,6.419047619047619,18.714285714285715,7.447530270364453,0.3700285714285712,280,6,60,4,7,98,52,75,0.157,0.659,0.184,0.106,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,4,0,7,2,0,3,0,13,15,3,2,1,4,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,2,1,6,3,9,10,1,10,3,0,0,1,0,4,1,1,4,36,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260823756710887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20589065420066205,0.0,0.0,0.12657051710585734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23707760966519195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4811273422211244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3630747177655455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4459794675561044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23717755436221055,0.0,0.3387600858008866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21329342374812865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14267293046341462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744926640601565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15820590886830269,0.0,0.0,0.14341713564943626
mentalhealth,LakeForest3,2020/02/08,"The IRC Village, A Place to Chat in Real Time Hi I'm Lake!  I have schizophrenia and some times I look for places to talk to a group of people with mental illness in real time.  There is a place called The IRC Village, in which people with mental illness band together to talk about their struggles and day to day life.  We are not experts or professionals but it is great to hear from other people that share in illness.  Its a cool place, come check it out some time.  Here is a link to the website:  [https://theircvillageblog.wordpress.com/about/rules/](https://theircvillageblog.wordpress.com/about/rules/).",6.9316,10.40452896,4.3580000000000005,81.62900000000002,69.4,5.2,22.0,6.2581,0.31789999999999985,496,12,80,3,10,136,63,100,0.085,0.804,0.111,0.69,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,1,0,1,0,3,4,0,1,8,1,5,4,0,0,0,15,9,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,6,7,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,4,3,18,9,2,16,0,0,1,0,11,9,0,3,6,50,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14848549909763598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526259007916374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18756195431398895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603211184910627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638938537208874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027112785907691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211240864612236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930892737623195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024384254417647,0.0,0.6077130516412349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33102938282858196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15201986922116562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337589651995673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.339171824453478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helpmypen15plz,2020/02/08,"I’m feeling like my brains not normal So me and my friend were talking about a shoe and he can describe off memory like he’s seeing the picture? I can only describe it a little like I can picture how it looks just can’t put all the colors in the right spots. Is my memory normal? What can this be? I’m 18yo male btw. Or is it just my anxiety making me not think straight? I can rarely  picture things perfectly in my head is that normal especially not a human not even close ones ? I can only picture basic pictures of it or a human. But I can always recognize people or items. Sorry for the rant I’m just gonna anxious about this and I know my post is not that good quality.

Anyway thanks in advanced",1.125,3.451149277777777,3.161666666666669,88.42500000000004,84.0,5.544444444444443,20.805555555555557,6.9077264865688965,0.6036888888888892,552,17,110,7,16,186,83,144,0.10099999999999999,0.7759999999999999,0.12300000000000001,0.6393,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,9,7,0,0,8,0,14,3,3,2,2,26,25,9,0,3,12,0,1,3,1,1,0,0,0,3,10,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,1,4,14,7,8,22,2,11,0,0,3,0,7,8,0,3,3,76,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500629731152842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379647975520121,0.2037405343500759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20132665728280835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11911735116945972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09118875374540213,0.1288397798533499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933547938586294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512663274840377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850878323413032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911387703272584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643249897094632,0.18075485823231266,0.0,0.0,0.15144587862369344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038287997726893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5301046766834134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220764951021493,0.2743237147678365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502975353725151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17272236839769914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18129833190576009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15401516972631255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437130387533129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20188346156139955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449559150594072,0.0,0.16603909006501666,0.0,0.0,0.11981439090188395,0.11555893829501912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,probablythrowawayy9,2020/02/08,"I feel like I'm going crazy (vent) last year I went through a rape & a bereavement &, lost my job and I was fine. completely fine. I had maybe a week of being a bit down and that was it.

this past month I crashed my car, relationship problems & someone I used to be close to but ended with in a really bad way has died. and I'm just not coping. the stress is driving me insane, I'm stressing to the point of being poorly, I'm irritable, and I thought everything last year showed me that I was resilient and really could cope with anything because those are two really shitty things to go through right? I don't know why I posted this, I think I just need to get it off my chest. I know better days are coming but I'm so anxious all the time and I'm finding it really difficult to cope.",2.2045209059233457,3.866304835365857,3.800522648083625,88.67914634146345,76.8658536585366,7.124738675958188,23.29965156794425,7.957251820313856,1.0942993031358883,619,19,134,10,14,206,99,164,0.237,0.6970000000000001,0.065,-0.9863,2,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,3,11,1,2,8,0,13,2,1,1,1,26,32,9,1,3,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,10,0,0,6,1,1,6,2,7,0,1,7,1,18,4,15,21,2,24,0,1,0,1,1,6,0,0,11,77,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42335655921648574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471381611081453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10717936017712104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874794020418456,0.07939527105301794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151898530375495,0.14219224503884567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219330251807154,0.13655790456937367,0.0,0.0,0.10398889218148348,0.0,0.0,0.08399632750660492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351722622701479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535714418359827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170545220580962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585506208984263,0.09304603203124516,0.0,0.0,0.1190402629062024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804688942688324,0.0,0.14804084395304198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12924664575593414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431569192003416,0.21233178494115704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06363042917117548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217624152017685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308471714272247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039591745302195,0.0,0.0,0.09657395642887524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243322243967644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312227156204893,0.0,0.12473733687481915,0.0,0.0,0.12462550617502945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33374946263974986,0.0,0.0,0.13983285128250075,0.0,0.1112272966622858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11035495372945836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983871374909852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08652804022445684,0.08345482029178948,0.0,0.10339884578682568,0.0759460727310257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722904221125306,0.0,0.0,0.11248862630450644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338128308167466,0.10447353523310828,0.0,0.0,0.12073709372460426,0.11752456332754505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16774517703134126
mentalhealth,Siberiayuki,2020/02/08,"How can I NOT think about the past? I can remember everything everyone said on bla year and the season/approximate month etc, I hate it, it is like being scrolled 100x times and I still could remember all the bad things I have done, that made me so guilty and I hate myself for that (well, I kept on thinking about the events that happened 10-12 years ago, I was 10-12 at that time, a stupid child!) 

How could I forget it??",3.772980392156864,4.730814788235296,4.0950000000000015,90.93583333333336,71.70588235294117,8.019607843137255,23.57843137254902,8.344100000000001,1.0057843137254905,327,8,74,5,6,102,58,85,0.23399999999999999,0.737,0.027999999999999997,-0.9592,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,3,0,5,0,9,0,0,3,1,16,17,6,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,8,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,5,1,11,2,6,9,2,12,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,10,50,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167537660265651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15780763658997954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30180325762415955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19341327035977665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21078566932447845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805982072473984,0.16986158490427195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671326383278592,0.0,0.0,0.3731979984720845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233616401244632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788369717314528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508585045717294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18042249303470845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4282017544810142,0.0,0.1797828856507548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15093615213949552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556362447827574,0.2422079522161284,0.0,0.0,0.22041558163715333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993426992677144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243420426051114
mentalhealth,Kilotina,2020/02/08,Help: I'm stuck at home and need tips! So I live at home with my parents and they treat me well when it comes to everything except for mental health. I want to move out but they will not support that for the life of them even though my sister moved out no problem. They always guilt trip me and make me feel even more horrible than I already do. Any tips for either making home life better or for finding support elsewhere. Anything is appreciated.,5.093103448275862,6.218773885057473,4.9845402298850585,85.15198275862069,68.77011494252875,7.179310344827586,27.143678160919546,7.1686216300943375,1.2630781609195396,356,11,69,3,6,110,65,87,0.204,0.6579999999999999,0.138,-0.8424,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,4,1,6,7,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,2,0,19,13,8,0,3,5,2,1,0,0,1,3,0,3,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,0,4,2,2,1,0,1,1,12,5,14,11,2,9,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,1,47,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689813408408547,0.0,0.13338477729897308,0.0,0.0,0.10901140601027713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13191555175835856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177480622482985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808667434481595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21175698479565427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440698268546007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105391595271888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14651386178067372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17039438810768184,0.0,0.0,0.1074475927234088,0.0,0.4823903581690711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264532270862316,0.0,0.0,0.1415503157668539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21400673734541065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161547526178401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3407530302007047,0.0,0.11886250045484233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779972969954176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338813725959427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638194521957314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749669431203248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455074907303156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14413147539398252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,micabeaner,2020/02/08,"Anyone here with psychosis? My daughter is 17, she recently got diagnosed with psychosis. She’s been on risperidone 2mg for four weeks now and there has been minimal improvements. She hears voices, gets vibrational messages though car engines and the tv. It’s scary for her. Her doctor wants her on the med for six weeks before he calls it a failure. My question is how many meds did you try before finding one that works, also did your psychosis become permanent? Do you have to stay on meds for long term? She was lucky to see a youth psychiatrist for the diagnosis and will see him again March 10th. Also she sees her GP every two weeks",4.626750000000001,6.77195484166667,4.528333333333336,83.97000000000001,71.41666666666666,7.466666666666668,27.0,8.238735603445708,1.83265,511,18,93,8,10,157,85,120,0.057,0.9009999999999999,0.040999999999999995,-0.4479,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,3,0,1,8,1,0,0,5,0,11,2,0,1,0,10,18,7,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,5,15,1,12,11,1,15,0,0,3,0,19,3,0,2,10,61,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370678248470349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364099670091786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16370070361220318,0.252253781682204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513522973019817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15044326665533392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171256332329566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12488430494184405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13547317428700864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744042129914216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854750640752144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16705813985256812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117272707455174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15027489915850198,0.0,0.0,0.4939271525388338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043976869804867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16604372847884574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463523713344177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3543437197866224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579860401192471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456283853203039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10063371529719548,0.0,0.144792373513451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742578997277949,0.0,0.3566867487053587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790813925539706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kirito4318,2020/02/08,"Depression, OCD I have severe ocd and depression. I go to therapy and my therapist gives me all these cognitive skills to beat back the intrusive depressing thoughts but it's like I see through it every time. She tells me to deep breath and as I start there's a voice in the back of my mind saying ""Why you useless shit you know I will be here, you know I will be back."" I lost my grandma this past week and she meant the world to me, the only woman to show me love other than my SO. We buried her yesterday and since I have had terrifying thoughts and no this has not been the only time I've been suicidal. Its been seven years of this, the maddening cycle of intrusive depressing thoughts.

What's worse is my SO blames herself even though she goes through hell trying to make me feel better, which makes me feel even more guilty cuz I know I'm holding her back and it makes her feel useless even when I tell her she means everything to me. She's pushed me to go to therapy, practices coping skills with me, puts on meditation videos everything she can all the while I feel like I'm possessed by something telling me that I would just be better off dead. I try to think of my SO, my family, my newborn nephew and I know it would devastate them if I did anything to my self but I don't see a light at the end of the tunnel and I'm so tired of fighting.",3.3924190476190472,4.7536255890909125,4.106233766233768,88.94696969696973,73.10909090909091,8.001731601731603,25.82251082251081,8.563005593585519,1.5553601731601732,1067,35,231,19,21,340,146,275,0.261,0.6779999999999999,0.061,-0.997,0,0,1,0,2,0,20.0,1,3,1,6,17,15,3,0,11,0,18,4,2,4,2,40,46,21,2,3,5,1,4,2,0,4,1,2,0,3,13,11,0,1,14,2,0,4,3,10,0,1,10,9,51,5,27,29,3,24,1,7,2,1,27,6,2,1,16,156,64,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259910936395545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3087251170514101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754499099347176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3458073294533172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890142050286827,0.0,0.0,0.19888790342655052,0.0,0.08456928053365985,0.0,0.1804190518219967,0.0,0.09462351351363443,0.0,0.2030080965864972,0.07170708392856694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962877235237546,0.1140895209656218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206513270035379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980751661383266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956989202841012,0.0,0.09059130007839944,0.0,0.2010009320394266,0.0,0.0,0.10933652604105078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134895454303906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15267764087181535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581817789769204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090342219517154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07982129801588964,0.0,0.0,0.15996989351026525,0.0,0.10471179500139484,0.11339385718386967,0.10303229368331944,0.08303026908739862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727267785491793,0.0,0.0,0.07104511321877148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979267826086696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631934537026197,0.0,0.2295724436485893,0.11654175248870935,0.0,0.06431549709607466,0.09861677796542843,0.2390568265327984,0.1170575744603481,0.11536495154913537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136294483187077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805138316565603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057176907196343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228950754810433,0.14260537737725798,0.0,0.0,0.06463745538315642
mentalhealth,Sweetloaf0411,2020/02/08,"I never want to do anything Howdy, I'll try to make this short. 

Basically, I don't want to do anything,ever. I have periods where I'm motivated and feel like a powerful, bad ass lady. I'll clean the whole house, make something cool, cook dinner, kick ass at work, etc. However, lately I'm really bad about getting out of bed on time. I eventually do get up because I HAVE to, I can't not work. I work part time (30 hours) until something with more hours comes around, and I'm in school part time because I have to work. So, it isn't like my life is filled up with responsibilities. I'm normally a hobby-hopper, normally love reading, love walking (especially in the winter), and used to eat relatively healthy. If I didn't have to work, I would probably never leave my apartment, let alone my bed. My body feels so heavy, and I'm not sure why this is happening. I can't convince myself to do anything. I tried to make lists, I tried to make like Nike and JUST DO IT, tried to have my husband keep my accountable, nothing. I kind of feel nothing, not any particular sadness, however I have always felt insecure and like my life doesn't matter a pea. It's like my body and brain gave up without my permission. Is this just normal laziness? If anyone else has had this experience, what the hell is going on and how did you manage?",4.472052586938087,5.4165799541984745,5.714910941475829,80.01454622561496,70.06870229007635,8.87565733672604,29.05937234944869,9.150863307647796,2.3333835453774383,1036,38,207,20,18,347,137,262,0.08800000000000001,0.7509999999999999,0.161,0.9623,3,1,2,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,0,7,8,16,1,1,6,1,26,12,5,7,3,43,51,14,0,8,8,1,4,5,0,1,2,0,3,0,8,13,3,1,5,2,1,4,12,5,0,0,5,5,26,11,28,44,5,28,1,1,0,4,5,13,3,2,16,120,34,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752405546906308,0.0,0.0,0.0783508262667206,0.0,0.0,0.06403379685717646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584067919026487,0.0964807111465244,0.15497559297236713,0.0838246774786989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15724367536637526,0.11480129374078693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20918684194387185,0.0,0.1051166028511686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111274202669601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635184734436927,0.07866076947662051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105016189569013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210909101951822,0.0,0.0,0.1428343192300193,0.06726978013275271,0.09041086250383584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839214398582907,0.0,0.053514775461054216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326767605244162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854623864414381,0.10865099769055586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369604523855535,0.0,0.09805585759113793,0.0,0.0,0.10621951404180212,0.0997045972133167,0.0,0.0962876380369614,0.13301965795693654,0.2300154497002244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997084539889876,0.0,0.25141706628297633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14524800385727124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.276778065659742,0.18070310823148128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20393783907390492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015232087487693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418808156627703,0.0,0.060322972621930634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529757812870733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498193943425755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887471359706833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647209075884042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25572089715530183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132625318614853,0.0,0.0,0.11107908209652084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496710029060578,0.10512917996930357,0.0,0.09076938603540123,0.0,0.34275747073503904,0.0,0.0,0.06689040926188508,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,XxxBlu-flarexxX,2020/02/08,"Anxiety and depression... I need advice I have a friend that's depressed and suffers from anxiety. She's failed I college and decided to drop out... she's been heart broken multiple times, feels like she is a disappointment to her mother (her father is dead). She literally has no will to live because she's constantly in physical and emotional pain and I've been trying to help her for more than a year now and at this point I literally don't know what else i can do. Her mother refuses to get therapy because she doesn't believe and that makes it worse for her. I know this might not be the right community but i really need some advice.",4.103790322580643,5.9489650241935506,5.51858064516129,77.58287096774197,72.14516129032259,9.798709677419355,28.529032258064518,10.125756701596842,3.0993283870967736,509,20,96,15,10,171,79,124,0.172,0.769,0.059000000000000004,-0.8625,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,1,8,0,0,4,0,13,2,1,1,0,20,20,8,1,2,2,3,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,6,8,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,2,1,18,2,12,15,2,10,0,5,0,0,17,5,0,2,5,66,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497314825892933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737891891533389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181698635891163,0.0,0.0,0.2016129171260569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19337902397823686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082549949824395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14948794379685695,0.2012922148380096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048139594611042,0.1278403603043917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13825464393178036,0.0,0.0934928515705501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120540315196548,0.1199449535089001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966900869506476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742486717579255,0.0,0.15801420593508095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194490612161214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18983536101265705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653750862098491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19041310013034166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691635335153459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463855745330205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528204628459081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046424307341224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043459144864722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149382518116432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18236311928867727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523653079482993
mentalhealth,oneDayBigOne,2020/02/08,"Anxiety and strong panic attacks turned into a constant sense of powerlessness and depression Hello. To give a little background: During last summer, after two years of difficult and stressful events I went to the metro and suddenly I felt like I got a heart attack. My heart was pumping two times faster then normal and everything around started to fading. I had to leave a train and calm down myself. I was wandering around a metro station for a next 30 minutes semi conscious and finally I gathered my whole strength to get back there and took a ride home. Where I fell asleep and stuck in my bed for a next two days. After that things went slowly better and I deluded myself maybe I was just exhausted due very bad sleeping patterns and too much coffee/cigarettes. However few months after the same thing occured but much stronger. Now I was basically traped in my house. For the next weeks every time I went out of my house I got a panic attack and felt extremely tired. Even simple shopping in the nearby grocery store was a few hours struggle with my own psychics. I was terrified especially by claustrophobic places full of people. Such as public transport or shops. Doctor diagnosed a strong anxiety and panic attacks and prescribed me an SSRI pills for help. Couple months had passed and now I feel bit better. I can function normally to some extend. However I still fell trapted under my mental conditions and don't know what to do. 

I am extremely procrastinating and have terrible sleeping pattern. I wake up with head full of things to do. But suddenly I feel very stressed and to avoid those thoughts I'm browsing internet, watching movies or playing video games. Just for a little release. Then it becomes very late and I feel depresed that I did nothing whole day. I usually go sleep at 3 or 4am and wake up around 2 pm. Just to repeat the same patterns again and again. Very ofther I put off time even simple things like bank transfer or call someone  due to hight stress level.  After few days thoughts of neglection about those things became a very heavy burden.

My head is full of thought, mostly negative ones. I am IT programmer however I cannot find a job, even attempt to find one. Since I cannot focus on anything more then for a few minutes. So I'm slowly running out of money.  I've always been an ambitious person with strong 'go big' attitude and recent chain of enormous failures makes me even harder to push anything forward. Now I am afraid of any failure so each effort to improve is very difficult.

I used to be a very happy and helpful person with tons of friends but recently I've cut off almost all my social relations except my family and girlfriend. She's extremely patience and trying to help me but I feel that one day dealing with me will be too difficult for her. Which scares me even more. Some members of my family know about my problems. They are very sensitive about my current state and I don't want to depressed them more. So I lie that everything is going much better with me. 

Yesterday I have failed my university exam. I was learning whole night (procrastination)  and woke up at midday with my head bumping. I couldn't leave my house since I was too tired and afraid about another panic atack (they're much stronger if I I don't sleep at least 7-8 hours). I was too stressed to get back to sleep even for a moment either. 

I think that was a final call. At this moment I don't have a suicidal thoughts but I feel if I won't fix it the rest of my life will be an endless suffer and misery. I believe that extremely self discipline and more positive attitude would help me a lot. Yet, I cannot do any of that. Slowly dying inside.  
I'm desperate to seek any help or advices. Maybe someone had been through something similar and won. I would be more then happy for any responses. Thanks.",4.262078640584864,6.531125423236513,4.765935585852598,81.33355463347166,72.77593360995851,7.688678126852403,28.488638608970557,8.515128840125781,2.3158107488638597,3063,123,538,56,63,973,342,723,0.16399999999999998,0.706,0.13,-0.97,6,1,2,0,0,0,63.0,0,0,2,12,36,47,5,13,29,0,47,20,13,2,1,100,85,51,2,9,17,0,7,2,2,5,7,0,2,3,20,45,0,3,18,5,5,16,10,31,0,6,31,8,75,16,83,44,33,104,0,5,1,0,23,32,0,12,59,368,95,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04721973028540777,0.0,0.0,0.04838753481499269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04020780151329484,0.0,0.0,0.1314425548193396,0.050669863691509776,0.07393244423501574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952982985049657,0.1290505596905641,0.0,0.2198931489896237,0.0,0.07431331953437395,0.04034687819902178,0.0,0.05336788773143618,0.0,0.05444238247162095,0.0,0.12821073102285002,0.05275514350576185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868439453310912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05221894973539505,0.0,0.0,0.053467409164673366,0.0,0.12465485189736862,0.049817893044907205,0.08323939048572307,0.04904584517750271,0.050150640016352464,0.0,0.0,0.04945964719899028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149747788609933,0.0,0.04071339596281332,0.0,0.08685745284472035,0.0,0.09110742219309494,0.0,0.12216535614095494,0.0,0.0927934570038881,0.10586884790315684,0.08833092340394075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037333481954956345,0.0,0.05049253446775843,0.04635489612117743,0.08238757288053816,0.0,0.07729508637648509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287940294078107,0.0,0.0,0.1487770368161618,0.0,0.0,0.11452368085546782,0.16194619688949408,0.0,0.04847093790349279,0.0,0.09517493532019954,0.16727141081416608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047952160419367014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053113049971139865,0.03938890542991682,0.05450935670917681,0.10233210919994656,0.0,0.0,0.034131280162201766,0.047215407863368634,0.09686274117446952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04108166348385663,0.0,0.0,0.03225533150010492,0.0,0.09709195187234662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048697242662000206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771403696394833,0.0,0.14208901371546453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541730872864642,0.04534695348599852,0.09469066298800444,0.04636629283189141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823277813784476,0.0,0.0,0.22678197134527975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03350041258758691,0.08438586872285407,0.050486238484177805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0462376584668577,0.0,0.048576988664339536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542435371697963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04837878374871656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050410417884209364,0.0,0.0,0.07994496821830549,0.0,0.2417846473187119,0.04925822615473307,0.08188620158544965,0.03720066093458157,0.0,0.0,0.034202582869881364,0.0,0.03859003707167829,0.0,0.2214108969769763,0.05051667954871697,0.0,0.052856459882892136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04448843467637723,0.0,0.0,0.16051505404062266,0.030962806864313505,0.0,0.1534491827264959,0.08453089613705166,0.1110781343535561,0.0,0.0,0.053687555405959916,0.032807487698407696,0.05256049465405093,0.14161081101409498,0.0,0.0,0.0417347206371138,0.05321989121981672,0.3189658958840849,0.028501586377736282,0.0,0.0387610192262679,0.0,0.0,0.1343850229842708,0.0,0.16184946871160033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865317002757129,0.0,0.0,0.031117804224380336
mentalhealth,fishfingersandwich30,2020/02/09,"ADVICE PLEASE: Depression and anxiety in a loved one Hi all,
I was wondering if I could ask for some advice please. My younger sister lives and works 2hrs from me and has moderately severe anxiety and depression. It affects her day to day life considerably, which obviously as her sister is tough to see. It also has severely affected her relationships with colleagues, friends and now her flatmate. She has been given notice on her flat and needs to move out in the next 6 weeks, but is really struggling to find anywhere to live as everyone she has met has picked someone else to move in. I can imagine she has been quite negative when going to these viewings because she’s desperately unhappy in general - but it feels like a vicious cycle as she then worries more about her living situation. Her mental health is obviously far more important, but she cannot get past the panic of having a deadline by which to move out, regardless of offers to have a couple of weeks off work, move back home etc. She’s currently undergoing therapy which is due to come to an end in a few weeks time, and has reluctantly agreed to a GP appt to review treatment options - but there is no quick fix to these issues so I cannot see this helping her immediate ‘deadline panic’. She is heavily reliant on me and texts me constantly with negative thoughts and comments, and other than trying to be understanding, supportive and positive for her, I don’t know how else to help this conundrum. My pointing out that she’s doing brilliantly to get to viewings and be functioning despite all that’s going on in her head seems to fall on completely deaf ears! I was hoping some others may have experience of helping loved ones, as she doesn’t seem to have the energy or momentum to help herself - particularly in a situation like this where there is an element of time pressure also. I’ve sent her batch cooked healthy meals, I’ve suggested we do a daily walking plan together, and I do as many little care packages as I can to make up for not being able to live round the corner. All advice and suggestions welcome! Thanks for reading my lengthy post ☺️",10.510148170099274,8.228923324937032,10.192206252778194,63.58365387464809,58.823677581863976,13.875181508371613,42.49651800266707,12.423614985922036,5.292483301229812,1708,76,293,45,17,561,221,397,0.11900000000000001,0.715,0.166,0.9763,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,1,0,0,4,12,18,1,4,14,0,36,9,2,5,5,57,62,32,0,5,7,2,2,2,1,1,3,2,1,0,15,21,2,0,10,2,0,10,8,8,0,2,8,8,37,10,60,49,9,50,0,2,5,2,42,21,0,10,20,209,52,4,0.08272320677032341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425084807606307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230743713431242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656605351184705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733503151818104,0.0,0.0,0.06360903980755939,0.0,0.05042729903814341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434182251506891,0.0,0.0,0.07125871781932316,0.08673370842381296,0.08939439856111575,0.0,0.06604774935750524,0.09153165487082356,0.0,0.10669924969342093,0.0,0.1424987535515545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138209248893115,0.0,0.07326820764989903,0.0,0.09225824244106948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904556909418928,0.0,0.0809191695602398,0.0,0.0,0.0418273388973305,0.05909747544559731,0.0,0.0,0.0756075123308254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06391174434696513,0.0,0.08643892252609134,0.0,0.09402700952924582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489787579208287,0.08793090048531081,0.0,0.0,0.22179048707114846,0.0,0.08297812122864108,0.0821628096887592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634153570436805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04546251104221498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058429847357746464,0.08082876063481369,0.08291038535004745,0.2921844285504007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14932184767968554,0.0,0.05521838287541875,0.08386834774439582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336553571860691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516867089508974,0.0,0.061338209638247834,0.0,0.0,0.08797706887455843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094180919193736,0.0,0.0,0.11211077160197908,0.0,0.0,0.1941157188687577,0.0,0.0,0.07896866118822657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18161047944209532,0.07820016890135596,0.0,0.07922596527956609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879863130010307,0.08274559284490407,0.0,0.052994604505839135,0.0,0.0,0.0888137657754223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318393711725247,0.15061620115467492,0.0,0.1869073548516068,0.0,0.0,0.18596870075267846,0.0,0.0,0.07009110464954255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648025685015255,0.0,0.0,0.0938733147286114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761604145807729,0.09460119634082167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06567298590377363,0.09647313422036477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056163627303144406,0.0,0.0,0.08611777563848405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19906670005272456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970978900666828,0.120446959514866,0.08400943195527691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loonylovewell,2020/02/09,"Anyone know this feeling? I've come to a point where I feel like no one I know likes me and no one I ever meet ever will. I'm just wondering if the way I've been feeling is relatable to anyone else and any advice on how to deal with this feeling would be great. 

I think the problem is that I constantly get into my head about how others see me, no matter who I'm with or in what setting. I constantly do things which convince me I'm screwing every relationship I have up or that makes people see me badly. It's overwhelming lately, seeing and fearing all the ways in which I'm potentially making people dislike me or ways in which I'm potentially hurting friends. I feel like everything I do is 'wrong' somehow. I just sort of want to run away from it all, just stop thinking about it. 

It's weird because I feel like I can handle social situations mostly fine. I don't lock myself in my room or anything. But I feel deeply unhappy in all my relationships and just deeply alone. 

I could go on much longer on this feeling, and I'm not quite explaining it right I think. But anyhow, relatable to anyone?",3.3498383838383816,5.084009781818182,4.67757575757576,83.2958080808081,73.9090909090909,7.434343434343432,25.858585858585855,8.167268648758528,1.6417373737373744,872,30,170,14,18,289,120,220,0.145,0.7240000000000001,0.131,-0.7218,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,12,16,1,2,4,0,13,2,1,4,5,55,43,14,0,5,12,0,8,4,1,2,0,0,1,0,17,9,0,1,15,0,0,3,5,8,0,2,1,11,25,8,22,38,5,28,0,2,3,1,8,15,1,10,10,114,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165290913243928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773946364872773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707411817074434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182119917422022,0.10658683153995614,0.0856044551530317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773576083735168,0.0,0.08685728441380355,0.06341322535410787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960910494340624,0.0,0.2248300920127836,0.0,0.08305621942930289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724613893926646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690029421813507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881947709606714,0.08764631045679305,0.0,0.09349177460494723,0.0,0.0,0.1170580625706989,0.4207889802628961,0.2229483791382034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037015514121898,0.0,0.05434924116565485,0.0,0.05912031834325305,0.0,0.0,0.11468892605869555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676058865687403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136188141192303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433983230801,0.0,0.11734575040844747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20328720796057906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887619697099915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647100858388195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098128909981295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442369270676485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833810312783227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995387408233617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106443533727848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22336977990448245,0.0,0.08883755336087656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486855308783256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692947425877467,0.0,0.10604130851801166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697031345401544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911018806823786,0.1999667961023476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613571732128621,0.2477127610186247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281165510066885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389701733030919,0.113735995421868,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Christianx12,2020/02/09,"Perception of time Not sure if this is the best place to post but wanted to get people’s thoughts. I’m in 35, good job, married, great kids, overall pretty successful. I have normal anxieties but lately I’ve been up at night thinking about time. 

Like I can’t fathom how 18 years have passed since high school or 10 years since I’ve been married. I’ll watch football or tv shows on YouTube from a decade ago and they seem like yesterday. My kids growing has been in a blur. I’m in pretty good shape and feel better than I did when I was a teenager. Basically I can’t believe how old i actually am.

My memories are strange too. I can remember intricate details of my youth. Exact dates, events, parties etc but now everything just comes and goes. 

Just wondering if this is normal.",3.1174530075187974,5.341604861842106,3.860075187969926,86.72552631578951,76.03947368421052,7.237593984962406,26.646616541353367,8.192908349453996,1.785445864661654,617,24,121,11,14,196,107,152,0.033,0.6890000000000001,0.278,0.9928,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,3,8,9,0,0,4,0,15,0,0,2,2,29,25,13,0,5,10,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,7,2,0,3,3,0,0,0,6,2,11,9,13,19,2,27,0,0,1,0,3,9,0,7,16,65,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.1506627931739247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136857804970936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181082599561244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17394515028203406,0.1620232360790505,0.1365457930817301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13299368882600013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218614595271448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875616755075976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806444269507712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066262989770223,0.0,0.0,0.2589907432344493,0.0,0.17021599929685113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631219708778534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320868359945333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741591351094385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508547356593423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144884964265958,0.30253969161506955,0.0,0.0,0.1620067899453822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070348878485525,0.0,0.16130514392684053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786335897939654,0.3141411528950715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17489426589237786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625136242280466,0.0,0.14055125324671006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554267260121166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14551115756386598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892715653974303,0.0,0.12256875956856393,0.18005260809075282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106347850107416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674298405712219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988447561081025
mentalhealth,scubs1280,2020/02/09,"Lions Mane Mushroom I’ve always had constant racing thoughts and they’ve become more prevalent as now I work underwater as a commercial diver.
Is there anything anyone else takes to calm down the mind?
No prescription meds.",4.041538461538462,7.388142256410263,3.888589743589743,78.76057692307695,87.97435897435898,5.676923076923077,27.012820512820515,7.1686216300943375,2.1807743589743604,184,8,26,3,6,56,36,39,0.059000000000000004,0.88,0.061,0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,4,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,14,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26348794867189906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214172629137431,0.3244573909133296,0.2605856442885048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497280312294307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34219886265183563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645302644262129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35173982521454883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197381039690609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380902318637645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513940632181471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23053353017236525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goldieoldies,2020/02/09,"I am so exhausted I feel like this is a good place to get all my emotions out anonymously.

My best friends mental health isn’t great right now and she’s telling me everything from feeling sad to wanting to hurt herself and more and it has become so straining on me i don’t know what advice to give her ever so i feel like i’m being a bad friend when i can’t say anything helpful back, i’ve also started part time work along with my school and i have barley any spare time at that but i have no time to relax and i’m up to all hours in the morning talking to her.
i am so exhausted and keep breaking down into tears because i feel like an awful friend who can’t help, she won’t go to therapy, im so tired, i feel like she has put so much weight on my shoulders and then when i have spare time and i want to have fun she unloads onto me i don’t know what to do
she says she has anxiety but she doesn’t understand how much this is stressing me out, i can’t tell her i’m stressed because whatever i feel she feels 10x worse
I feel myself holding a grudge and i don’t want to but at this point idk what to do",1.069720860052808,2.7486983278008346,2.6855922293474173,95.31945586571106,80.2448132780083,5.709619011693702,22.572802715956243,6.574015621080383,0.3378448132780085,871,28,204,8,22,286,126,241,0.163,0.667,0.171,0.0029,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,13,20,0,3,5,1,23,6,1,1,3,37,45,23,0,3,3,0,9,4,3,1,4,2,0,0,9,14,1,2,11,1,0,2,10,8,0,0,0,11,38,12,26,43,7,29,0,2,0,0,24,14,0,0,16,135,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012838516490869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288745279805122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048435125651839,0.0,0.07929061293545528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529366262331306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796990917332357,0.08654194340615155,0.1263659990485401,0.11447132779338,0.0,0.0,0.1087724237345156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659030908413412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375575881591662,0.0,0.0,0.09315234665011224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4192612785630273,0.2961852674393968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402350982321165,0.0,0.054151922718618815,0.09942882760169124,0.058905678190905565,0.08693521851603465,0.0,0.11427254046992248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017322262946598,0.0,0.0,0.1389464487132675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207262908341372,0.0,0.110957574874648,0.0,0.11195787549015113,0.0,0.0,0.0921273099662314,0.0,0.0,0.11392471412675315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20254916055979172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044530384160584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238675124929196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224093361074412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829034088176663,0.0,0.09798108026279337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419509988092372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851502285830302,0.0,0.1648504666829543,0.0,0.10489754317866158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07336275130057636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374573965942092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330852186658075,0.18118624456235746,0.0,0.11853078505902814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24175246780278745,0.11912839414078162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079014637107929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834032360412506,0.0,0.0,0.1262156222316877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545714653457017,0.0,0.10562640219605203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway77808300,2020/02/09,"Why am I so afraid of people hurting me? I (19 F) am terrified of leaving the house.  When I do have to leave, I’m constantly on edge that someone might start a mass shooting or follow me to my car.   Almost every night, I have vivid nightmares of people breaking into my house.  I’m always looking over my shoulder because I think someone is behind me, even when I know I’m alone.  I’ve never been abused or assaulted or anything, so I don’t know where these feelings may be stemming from.  I know that everyone is somewhat afraid of these things, but the thought that I might be hurt or attacked is constantly on my mind.",4.996393442622949,5.730254991803283,5.446024590163933,83.17920081967216,68.75409836065573,7.739344262295082,32.463114754098356,7.645422480735847,2.2076688524590162,487,21,93,5,8,156,75,122,0.15,0.835,0.016,-0.9313,0,1,0,1,1,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,2,2,3,0,15,1,1,0,1,19,27,9,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,6,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,2,3,16,0,12,20,1,16,0,2,2,0,0,6,0,9,7,65,22,0,0.0,0.1748722080727914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779191836296535,0.1528606454198875,0.0,0.0,0.12280824269158595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145551706266328,0.0,0.0,0.16790703663818565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899706219755269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189887141719833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748302507614336,0.0,0.12435249936623785,0.14103033776277246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462687409308698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3406023581076706,0.31600025638331736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433378630061128,0.0,0.0,0.3125569175328703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393998219914446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31314325860190856,0.14902569498112198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113831933612605,0.0,0.0,0.13850495325369044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046432107442773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25010819141834656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446627121292884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805346709024017,0.09457089810165352,0.0,0.1171714428782554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317868834934218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zagerzu,2020/02/09,"Looking for advice on how to pursue mental therapy under complicated conditions. So I’m a 21 year old male and living in a small, Michigan city. I’ve had a pretty shifty life that has completely broken me as a person. When I was in my late teens I had control over my negative emotions and was able to keep up a cheery persona, but after I moved out and spent a lot of time alone to my thoughts, my mindset got worse and everything I’ve experienced eventually broke me down. I’m constantly terrified of myself because I’m afraid I’ll lash out in anger or try to get back at everyone who’ve wronged me.

I’ve tried to contact local therapists but they just stop responding to my emails and calls once they hear a fraction of what’s wrong with me. Only one therapist actually told me they declined me as a patient because she doesn’t have the experience to deal with someone of my magnitude, even though her profile said she has 12 years of experience. After about 10 therapists, they just won’t respond to my initial contact since I feel like they’re are warning each other about me(like I said, small city). I’m completely out of anyone locally who can help me. I have health insurance so it’s not like money is an issue. 

Is there any alternative option online or some route I haven’t considered? Please, I desperately need help. I don’t want to end my life so early and I don’t want to be a murderer.",5.8750352941176445,6.359956225454546,6.766823529411763,75.35988235294121,66.74545454545455,10.2524064171123,33.267379679144376,10.194018383442646,3.3787604278074865,1122,47,210,26,17,374,169,275,0.16899999999999998,0.748,0.08199999999999999,-0.9839,0,1,0,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,4,1,13,8,2,1,11,0,18,3,0,2,0,31,36,18,1,3,7,0,1,2,0,1,3,3,0,2,5,12,0,3,2,0,2,1,7,6,0,1,10,6,33,2,37,24,3,30,0,1,1,0,23,16,0,5,15,131,38,0,0.11190701735126574,0.0,0.10920510615351102,0.0,0.0,0.1093542421925096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159019205853134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610060925399965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824798849975971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860495887351838,0.0,0.13643495818789855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142695766702598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23466475714539844,0.12093173006046455,0.1255132356062722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537122106851265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588033224742493,0.09911640161071256,0.0,0.0,0.07391352954029415,0.0,0.0,0.10693195074900662,0.10057481138918377,0.21893307248520166,0.0,0.0,0.056583550402449376,0.07994639555582359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05846679777422632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950226467639498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895192643634538,0.12612734170916395,0.0,0.15001782966373542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680185175884555,0.0,0.09946809883866116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623598989880894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15808647167776085,0.10934423207208603,0.0,0.0988159465527678,0.0,0.09397371007254357,0.0,0.0,0.09513934431923536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277595267869275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893944933145555,0.0,0.08297763539729541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742758992362147,0.11917732122915045,0.07583109113359034,0.08511032941897002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771289109624584,0.0,0.12284030000508404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384966794519095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128983999003428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257064116817587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481845264973007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935592773701927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279754271344411,0.38979801713228496,0.0,0.0,0.10994807636465732,0.08884167164176647,0.06525388174991771,0.0,0.0,0.10693195074900662,0.0,0.1519550380239311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201131648923778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404281116489938,0.0,0.24470551203143245,0.0,0.1441289003170595
mentalhealth,venaqua,2020/02/09,"Feeling calm during a panic attack? (lol) I know the title sounds absurd but I don’t know how else to explain this. Am I having a panic attack or just really bad anxiety?

I rarely have full blown panic attacks, I’ve only had a few where I completely lost it.
In the past few weeks I’ve had quite a few, and they all felt weird to me. Firstly, I realize that I’m having a panic attack. I’m just laying in my bed and suddenly my heart starts beating like crazy for no reason, I’m really anxious, dizzy, feeling like throwing up. Yet I do not fear that “i’m dying” or “there’s something wrong with me” even when my heart goes 120-130 bpm.
Like i’m having the physical symptoms but my thoughts stay calm like “Oh your anxious and feeling really nauseous, I think you’re about to throw up from this, you should go to the toilet just in case”.
I just acknowledge I’m having it and do my best to calm down. After it somehow goes away I feel really exhausted and nauseous for the rest of the day.

TL;DR: Is coldly acknowledging you’re having a panic attack normal or is it just random bursts of really bad anxiety?",3.5150874403815564,4.923191081081086,5.076815050344461,81.92353736089031,72.87387387387388,7.7460519342872285,24.320084790673018,8.313332769828598,1.5441560148383675,868,25,166,14,17,293,121,222,0.309,0.564,0.127,-0.995,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,1,5,13,25,5,6,12,1,15,4,2,2,1,37,34,12,1,2,11,0,5,4,0,1,2,1,1,0,8,6,0,0,14,0,0,3,3,17,0,1,5,7,20,8,20,28,7,22,0,1,0,0,4,9,0,5,13,107,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768943215477605,0.20333388646474676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5119025066123666,0.08455177570269917,0.0,0.15028148483180034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094442536787398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943563833286062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05803830764246996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09339895654064856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517795044802372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059439801794804875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10126761142363504,0.18201349829651545,0.06429131358767895,0.08640779115816592,0.0,0.0,0.07654835274266918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051145331587990665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213285259921054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891605459827164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17586494711301195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823844315275897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817443919298026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844404729172396,0.0,0.5279394111165358,0.0,0.0,0.08590889749131707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957190742569082,0.0,0.0,0.2882604299972473,0.09252821890156646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928132747218113,0.0,0.0,0.06369780226135427,0.09592100628090114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353761594654417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05766414649451256,0.0,0.071444719070369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218728911545294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839367179262633,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,valsulcano,2020/02/09,"Strange feeling after experiencing nostalgia/visiting place from childhood I’ve tried googling this feeling before. I’ve tried telling people about it to see if they’ve ever felt the same way. I can’t find answers. It freaks me out. 

So here it is. Whenever I visit places from my childhood like old stores I used to go to as a child or something like that, I get the weirdest feeling when I come home. 

My home won’t feel like home anymore. I’ll feel like things look different. Like I should be in the past or like I’ve traveled in the future. 

It’s so hard to shake the feeling. I’ll look around and feel off for the longest time. Sometimes I wonder if it’ll ever go away. It’ll actually start to scare me.

One time I was just on my computer looking up different shops in town and when I got off the computer, I had that feeling. I don’t know what triggered it, maybe I felt like I was in a different place for a while. 

What the hell is this!!!! I hate it so much. 

Has anyone else every experienced this? Should I be concerned??",1.6594729907773385,4.005956618357486,2.9008014931927986,91.02390316205532,81.85024154589371,5.889240228370664,24.38493631971893,7.1686216300943375,0.9991178743961352,808,31,169,11,22,260,112,207,0.10099999999999999,0.768,0.131,0.507,3,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,0,11,12,2,2,11,0,15,0,0,2,2,31,39,13,0,4,5,0,11,7,0,5,0,0,3,1,16,5,0,0,14,2,2,6,3,5,0,1,6,17,20,7,23,26,2,36,1,0,4,0,3,15,1,5,21,102,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0973786959857232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896288478423744,0.06977409163360343,0.10224460110685156,0.0,0.08883247863610716,0.0,0.0,0.09375411330191964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491224051428492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595852844209935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31277167190015304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336007169019294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18052792272050927,0.08407569604677421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4036464994365697,0.14257713805142658,0.1916242627687992,0.0,0.09120442660228832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052135112782289036,0.0,0.1134236430332391,0.0,0.07980958151997716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893904500056116,0.09851999343453936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.300286508597687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054840876570077635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3412596432276984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25139036990470903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025046107260874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335566369628525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471072262348484,0.0,0.06761893312372512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525893976921906,0.06918043655036972,0.0,0.31277167190015304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09990519880200746,0.0,0.07951811850906525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682167963418553,0.09869288618511947,0.0,0.07063046187572422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721911264297619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629471492271156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637437362830255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549900707418208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618479505094442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920707174766926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821583219356433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CFOGetsPaidFirst,2020/02/09,"Nervous for my first therapy session tomorrow. What should I expect? Hey, I'm grieving over my cat that passed away a few months ago. It was pretty sudden and she was only 7 years old, but she was my best friend and other half. Since then I haven't felt like moving forward, improving myself, or changing anything. It doesn't feel right to move forward without her, I just feel like withering away. So I believe I have situational depression coupled with my grief.

I will be honest with my therapist, but I'm very introverted and bad at small talk or keeping engaged. If I'm asked what I've been up to, I usually say ""not much"" and genuinely can't think of anything else to add. I just lay in bed and try to keep distracted with TV lately. Will a therapist have a ton of questions to ask? Or will they just tell me to keep talking? I don't want to have a bad conversation or waste our time by not being extroverted. What was your first session like? How well did your therapist keep the conversation productive? Thank you for your time, good luck to you all.",3.8070215208034455,5.723935882926831,4.711965566714493,82.75822094691536,73.09756097560975,8.140602582496411,28.15638450502152,8.841846274778883,2.2496255380200862,836,33,162,17,17,271,129,205,0.16899999999999998,0.6729999999999999,0.157,0.2826,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,5,1,3,6,18,0,2,5,0,19,0,0,1,1,37,34,15,2,4,13,0,3,3,1,4,0,1,1,0,7,9,0,4,5,1,0,5,7,7,1,3,7,4,26,11,23,21,5,26,0,3,0,0,21,10,0,7,18,109,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947357955254726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18469002155125133,0.0,0.2098154511120105,0.0,0.21086308817817595,0.0,0.1873929774051068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264301056708769,0.11776479439293427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187106824967436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12416595093283027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665231807751208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937428851294374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11348055088715064,0.08016783097375407,0.10774589613783893,0.0,0.0,0.1909034070559004,0.0,0.0,0.08669855826179777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941222764239733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3989744217754211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658563817233984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447064036656356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957052063338918,0.2385377753136475,0.08249239013410682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775284070285327,0.0,0.0,0.08534606789390768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416500860098185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570869658852546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583268543354348,0.0,0.08923944437369867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928270432044735,0.12613658414286846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803915112297712,0.09808258428529973,0.1033143158310208,0.128329893298867,0.39087767915121735,0.0,0.071904107902748,0.0,0.0,0.13086924372609002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07618796144103025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359114655243827,0.0925907585488472,0.06618848062726111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089653927040328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817316160268696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722640541747939
mentalhealth,Jmch19,2020/02/09,"Ruining happy moments by obsessing over random memories This is hard do explain, or talk about. But I do this thing where I associate wonderful moments with random, bad memories. Last summer I was on vacation with my boyfriend. On the very first day, at our first stay, I went into a bathroom that was really disgusting. When leaving it, I thought ""what if I now have to think about this bathroom each time I have a pleasant time on this trip?"". And that in fact happened - when dining at a nice restaurant, hiking to a beach, or hearing my boyfriend say that he loved me - I had to think about this nasty bathroom. As if to ruin the moment, even though there was no reason for it. Just a fix idea.  
In November, I went to an art show and saw this really repulsive art video. I didn't think about it much then, except just noticing that I found it disgusting. A few weeks later, I gave birth to my first child.   
She is the most wonderful little baby, and now - two months old - she's started to smile at us. It's such a wonderful thing to see, but now my mind have to wander and show that video to me again, as if to destroy the wonderful moment.   
My mind is behaving as if there is an association between the experiences, except there isn't - it's a fix idea, just like the bathroom on our holiday. Or maybe the association is ""the most disgusting thing"" vs ""the most wonderful thing"".   
I probably do this to ruin for myself, maybe on some level thinking I don't deserve being happy. I just know that wanting the thoughts to go away, won't make them. They have become an obsession.  
How can I get rid of this?",4.592196480938419,5.7895629,5.39771260997068,81.46111436950147,70.0,8.862170087976539,28.929618768328446,9.218907990703514,2.402806451612903,1249,46,243,25,22,407,155,310,0.11,0.769,0.121,0.7098,0,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,3,0,2,3,22,16,4,2,21,0,22,2,0,3,1,53,49,21,0,5,16,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,25,8,1,0,17,8,0,4,5,10,0,4,12,5,31,6,42,35,7,46,0,3,2,1,15,16,0,18,26,185,56,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191447658887557,0.0,0.08168393806348538,0.0,0.10804551505894118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309223697228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461577211253751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569648214329576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496423659092394,0.0,0.1072655118917608,0.0,0.0,0.05111212121279779,0.0,0.055599026085558285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651071882554655,0.20828364307072614,0.08763643679131901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102614855457091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22087625502809533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05376479269108085,0.07974448222870971,0.0,0.10358781203048467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04779478145160573,0.09805133016396066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829536689353422,0.0,0.06530226421670557,0.0,0.19656670694774964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19756076174885287,0.0,0.07808694819886577,0.0,0.07191628394757148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138006854053324,0.1026560960817436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10547725339182816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534476691604415,0.1005855020708558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779831825055789,0.0,0.0,0.07795781949913935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924455584824778,0.10427373065691654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863202364631193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599755384857333,0.25074197668533016,0.09611744819624124,0.1553321359324826,0.114090883734961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556566482406496,0.0,0.11767740766581157,0.0,0.0,0.08071997031356258,0.05770265062159219,0.0,0.07847330041591165,0.0,0.0,0.18137872344521525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5304621431739036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KaiserMakes,2020/02/09,"How many mental disorders can someone have? Title may look dumb but,im asking that because im really concerned.
I have Asperger and Bpd,and not a while ago,i was handling them kinda well.
But recently i've been noticing some heavy depression simptoms,and i am very concerned about that(sorry for bad english,not my first language)",5.686499999999999,8.094921316666671,5.8066666666666675,74.80500000000002,69.16666666666666,8.8,35.33333333333333,9.3871,3.8582333333333336,269,14,41,6,5,85,50,60,0.18,0.789,0.031,-0.8655,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,3,4,1,0,1,0,7,0,0,1,0,7,9,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,1,2,1,4,1,2,6,1,3,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,3,3,23,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19506424160374172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057204135611265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837355666892668,0.1341426338005514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771498093796094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18953184564021974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25220049335392913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871774821235737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4753913048143334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184789604432312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22309981445613414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217622744583069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505324852883453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409719727454504,0.0,0.21727638529629026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18645070354785104,0.0,0.0,0.2463319922759551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18156726818406269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197854616288606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alicelouisexo,2020/02/09,"Help Hello, friends. I normally wouldn’t do this, but I feel like I’m losing it. I’ve struggled with anxiety/depression/BPD since I could remember. I finally got diagnosed with all of it at the age of 18(I’m 23 now) so I’m not new to the whole mental health thing. As of late, I’ve been feeling like I’m on auto pilot? I feel so out of it, i feel like I can’t think complete thoughts and I’m SO irritable it’s actually causing marriage problems now. I really don’t know what to do, I’m about to admit myself into a hospital because I know I shouldn’t feel like this. 
I do take 40mg of cymbalta and have been for months so I don’t think it’s medication related. I was doing som research and saw some people talk about a lack of vitamin D causing this. 
I just want some opinions, I’m scared. I feel like I’m losing it and like death is a better option at this point.",1.0876328502415475,3.0346723043478256,3.6597101449275367,87.03118357487922,81.3913043478261,7.132367149758455,23.809178743961354,8.167268648758528,1.4562207729468597,680,25,147,14,18,238,102,184,0.163,0.652,0.185,-0.2117,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,9,13,0,2,5,0,15,4,0,2,1,38,38,10,1,7,3,0,6,6,1,2,4,0,0,0,12,8,0,0,13,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,6,7,16,8,20,29,5,13,0,2,1,0,6,6,0,4,13,86,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.11698714401460085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307870787523874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602552908600194,0.0,0.0,0.15098667279371192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463028428300133,0.0,0.0,0.12569357196873818,0.0,0.0,0.09571569909907704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167729587677226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636944201391236,0.4282171786541817,0.0,0.13132442803079986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262022325240844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958802632599584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742853002918433,0.0,0.0,0.08035410642318683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176757935085165,0.0,0.1352316613232179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514085524517884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682336815300918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076809521528352,0.12081245174433508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568834573751464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578239189873064,0.0,0.0,0.11745851025158945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311080377270215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332685684025727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471049646630745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767992197780937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13580247810526186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002239054188313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916729456443237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532627263156687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013604031700896,0.09635628537494838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964400512415187,0.15363057149365078,0.0,0.0951725958696764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070927101144066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338435200823979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Drunken-Dreamer,2020/02/09,Depression recovery center/wellness center? Anyone know of any depression recovery places? I think I need like a week of therapy to help me try to work though my depression.,5.7070000000000025,8.875767700000004,6.40333333333334,66.965,72.0,12.0,33.33333333333333,11.20814326018867,5.513333333333334,141,7,20,6,3,46,23,30,0.304,0.5579999999999999,0.138,-0.8053,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,4,3,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,10,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17811169996968865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831375909801716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6767629873398416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17555661465198302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14394205337741733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795881167808004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19420721916625835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736462258771913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29952350059621025,0.0,0.0,0.1678250449107858,0.2573309068307758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778236101308123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21009302615693173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19067779449684985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PM-ME-FUNFACTS,2020/02/09,"Why do I feel the need to make poor decisions and put myself at risk in order to feel anything? I (22F) have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression. Lately I have been putting myself in risky situations and making dumb decisions because it feels good. I am not suicidal, but it's like I need the rush and excitement. 

I can't even fully enjoy it though because then I ruminate on all the terrible decisions I'm making and feel bad about them. I don't know how to stop/fix it.",5.443758865248221,6.080256638297875,6.58808510638298,75.73333333333333,67.72340425531915,10.947517730496457,31.624113475177303,10.864195022040775,3.573828368794325,380,15,72,11,6,128,62,94,0.228,0.6579999999999999,0.114,-0.8665,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,4,9,1,1,3,0,8,1,0,4,1,23,19,9,1,2,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,8,0,1,3,3,5,0,0,2,4,11,4,9,17,1,10,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,3,47,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600779880992815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15706197078088052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936058751054746,0.2326936402990599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16438791257146526,0.19371944128821555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606159363054412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3860193164293909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16008477453590828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489196718177723,0.0,0.215299014390834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324482429025917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38220269877004864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830413597871781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3837351388058589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21453525563155207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595679664814131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087704644487116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875195219244066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17222196046778493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaygay9619,2020/02/09,"Doctor Visit Tomorrow Hello! I’ve been taking Wellbutrin for depression since August of 2018. In the last few months, I’ve struggled deeply with anger, something which I never really remember experiencing before. Additionally, I’ve noticed that I’ve had more issues sleeping, my eating habits have gotten worse, and negative thoughts have been more insistent. I am aware enough to realize which of these are temporary or situational, but most of these issues have been persistent even after/before life changes. I have a Dr appointment tomorrow, but I don’t know how to broach the subject. I’m thinking my medication has plateaued, but am afraid that if I just say ‘oh my meds aren’t working’ or ‘I think I’ve been experiencing big mood swings over the last few months’ that the doctor will just say, “alright, here’s medication ____”. I know that they have an on-site psychologist who can see me during my appointment, but I don’t know how to open up about it in a logical way. My thoughts are pretty scattered lately and I don’t want to make anything worse by just going into the appointment blindly. Any ideas or advice or just knowing that I’m not the only one experiencing this prior to a dr visit would be really nice.",8.530610119047621,8.364760602678572,8.494464285714287,67.40886904761908,61.276785714285715,11.573809523809526,35.63095238095238,11.038039088145766,4.024459523809524,981,38,165,23,12,319,133,224,0.071,0.872,0.057,-0.248,1,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,2,9,7,1,2,10,1,23,10,1,3,1,39,39,13,0,3,14,0,0,0,0,2,8,2,0,0,12,6,1,0,12,0,0,3,7,4,0,1,8,7,15,2,17,28,6,21,0,1,2,0,7,7,0,6,10,106,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12342776054309618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589449835563656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394160169370717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21495942951601954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336182471930743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087898161904588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585653689305173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292457108508309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051103299127886,0.0,0.08342594893515147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178435480086051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258756469603487,0.0,0.2636677041664598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27766464458511425,0.20591749923488367,0.14248213165541146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892158309551257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431228447451428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403009015024148,0.2544861975940685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016373878994902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974173408481841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438037124167283,0.0,0.0,0.08559029417150127,0.09606373880562837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850173227218956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16183364807301234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14308355288394986,0.0,0.0,0.20089208295175232,0.0,0.0,0.10065197483524352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448416725628522,0.14197668588548587,0.12640028806548792,0.0,0.0,0.09723889234702762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320456637317601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496870065546233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161867502770198,0.0,0.2005505841162408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07450036154943332,0.10025825990099184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195450668683383,0.0,0.25743946473229545,0.08972633875151709,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oatmilkineverything,2020/02/09,"Dreading and Overthinking Stuff I go to a Drama School so I’m training to be an actor. I don’t have a problem with performing of course or speaking up in rehearsal or being in the space but they’re very hard and pushy on you at Drama schools and tomorrow I’ve got to do a song in front of one of the head teachers.

The thing is, I’m excited for it. But as with everything (had this all the way through auditioning, took me 2 years to get into this school) I’m also anxious and overly nervous about it because I constantly think about what horrible feedback I could get.

There was an instance once where I was pulled into the office by the heads and they told me my performance was shocking and failed me for the term. So it’s only encouraged me to focus on the worst of things.

But the one thing I can’t get is - how do I stop dreading doing something just for the sake of it? I know there’s no real problem. I’ve learnt the so bad made choices with it. I’ve got nothing to be scared of apart from what I make up in my own mind.

This happens constantly. I accept it but I really would like to know how you deal with this state, how I could manage it so I can stay calm until I actually have to do it. 

Thanks for the support!",2.181388690050106,3.905875141732288,3.639498926270581,89.5328990694345,77.11023622047244,6.665425912670008,24.53758052970652,7.520522993642371,1.0787858267716537,962,33,206,13,22,317,138,254,0.187,0.715,0.098,-0.9783,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,1,3,14,17,0,4,17,0,21,2,2,5,1,37,40,22,0,5,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,18,12,0,1,4,4,1,4,3,10,0,2,9,3,23,7,41,25,4,29,0,1,0,0,7,15,0,2,8,150,41,6,0.0,0.0,0.1232749068695512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102199906162088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271121136796852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10547603805449116,0.07700650343547863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27302473823561546,0.0,0.2017203512707356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023545357535501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353269956073105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19799868260135128,0.0,0.07179336758513243,0.0,0.20206716940665287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170871639260176,0.0,0.11316232249695188,0.0,0.2592916411764481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388497531906165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06171597876779146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953170102222065,0.08432287018547524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755216581319131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121217515413205,0.0,0.0,0.13453192522732382,0.17120208068236473,0.0960757999540027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24175179055707424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14378542379715126,0.08092698343518064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264732902143925,0.3835427130706893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725110104016133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464556488822405,0.0,0.10561329603379724,0.0,0.0,0.1446118192707872,0.0,0.14335203096403484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630302115974067,0.0,0.0,0.25177400637729497,0.08094391290906301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070888197693873,0.14035164279919252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423129518968054,0.0,0.10027084768659598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897376042164909,0.0,0.0,0.08134911172935616
mentalhealth,tindercopter120,2020/02/09,"Becoming a positive person? Hi guys....I imagine a lot of people here for whatever reason are negative by nature in terms of thoughts/reactions. I’m sure a lot of you meditate, diary, do CBT, etc to try to get more positive. 

Has anyone successfully moved their own disposition from pessimist to an optimist? Sometimes I feel 
I’m not in the midst of an episode/depression or anything - reasonably happy with life.",4.73247104247104,7.462441513513514,6.232857142857148,69.20500000000004,73.05405405405406,10.715057915057915,34.89575289575289,10.608840637214634,4.93159691119691,328,18,51,12,7,111,59,74,0.07400000000000001,0.684,0.242,0.932,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,1,1,3,0,0,6,0,3,1,0,2,1,10,7,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,13,7,6,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,3,1,34,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16322062042463728,0.0,0.19209410311920005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578065751783419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20105407102721226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603376488045106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802989929312856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195824058762005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484920019884179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648794587739799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3969099552412512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481005721048599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618318993573324,0.20382324215610012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4800125907555736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308695640098496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200062753329914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15848455697357347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,taylorsthighs,2020/02/09,"What can my community college do for MH? Hi, guys! If you want, scroll down for a TLDR on the questions I have.

I go to a community college in New Jersey of about ~8,000 people and serve on student government.

My college has literally no mental health support. Therapy isn't offered and the counselors are solely for academic support. We have small events during finals like therapy dogs and coloring to de-stress, but that isn't even close to enough.

Last semester, SGA attended a national SGA convention. There, I attended a workshop on mental health support in schools. I was amazed by a lot of the supports other colleges had in place, like therapy by licensed professionals as well as peer support, regular mental health related events, etc.

Unfortunately, getting SGA and school administration to get on board with any of my plans is like pulling teeth. (Unrelated to mental health example: I've been trying to re-set up billboards for clubs promotion that were taken down by administration last year and it's taken m o n t h s for administration to discuss my petition and report and they're at a stalemate for nooo reason.)

Most SGA officers + our advisor try to dull anything ambitious and want to prevent anything that might upset administration. So SGA and admin may very likely see me attempting to disrupt our currently nonexistant mental health supports as criticism, so I need some advice on how to make a good argument that administration won't see as negative criticism (and also how to stay patient if I meet pushback because I am very... assertive and chaotic good).

Almost every year, we have a student overdoses or killa themselves, so the fact that the school has taken no action except for little inconspicuous posters with the suicide hotline. I am honestly disgusted and bewildered that my school hasn't taken any initiative knowing of the opioid, suicide, and sexual assault crisis in our area and on a college campus very very close to us. Almost all of my friends and peers I've talked to about mental health are really struggling and want the school to do something, especially those that can't receive outside help due to transportation, familial, and financial issues, etc.

TLDR; Here are my questions:

1. What mental health supports should I set up as member of SGA? Ideas please :)

2. What do your schools do to support mental health? What would you like to see?

3. How can I attempt to rearrange the whole system with only three-ish months before I graduate and completr my SGA term? Setting up a solid mental health system for years to come would rely on administration, so how far can I as a student go in this decision?

4. If I can't get admin to set up a counselling system, what supports can SGA put in place ourselves?

5a. What if the rest of my SGA team doesn't support me with this? I'd like to say I can take action as a student and not claim my association with SGA in this matter, but I'm sure my advisors and team would still give me sh*t about how I represent SGA and need to stand ""in unity with them, even if we disagree"" (yup, actual words from president and advisors). I worry about what consequences may await.

5b. What if my position with SGA does end up being threatened? I want to stand up for what is right no matter what, but I also want to keep the position of power I currently have so that I can advocate for what's right and make executive decision.

Thank you so much for your time guys!!! Sorry this is so long haha but this is really important to me. And also very personal because nearly all of my friends and family members live with mental illness, including me although I am very lucky to have reached stability and receive very beneficial outside help.",7.46200645624103,8.130958344117651,7.814763271162125,68.57497130559543,63.352941176470594,10.928263988522241,36.58536585365854,10.751898458667489,4.241881994261119,2974,136,484,73,41,976,311,680,0.113,0.727,0.16,0.9767,3,0,2,0,0,2,87.0,7,5,1,8,25,32,2,2,24,2,46,11,1,8,4,97,84,60,2,17,13,0,0,6,2,8,10,1,0,3,27,40,0,2,8,3,0,12,12,5,1,0,8,5,52,27,96,67,12,75,1,1,4,0,33,36,0,18,24,320,79,25,0.0,0.0,0.04193679535474865,0.0,0.0,0.041994066372265985,0.0,0.0,0.08606526705380511,0.0,0.0,0.1030997875047974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844810355608208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072850550247341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052393565853199216,0.0,0.03656803182169165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03701862280842382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03760716918175302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03806254484844794,0.0444040218961529,0.09585558602256952,0.05676834484133372,0.0,0.03620776827755581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102484091835699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04707633227390964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640379814319783,0.0,0.06735701890693248,0.04122494077425479,0.04884666053622636,0.07208974139527048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510278444036018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41111780342043774,0.0,0.0,0.057609641561337785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04851284370191858,0.0,0.04485408720157095,0.0,0.03819760313642378,0.0,0.0,0.023617595147624064,0.07005971016594302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259706668985767,0.043071618127574485,0.03794716450844245,0.03803097361563704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03653528075227703,0.0,0.0,0.057371464160753026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4330806694858105,0.04558902556410944,0.0,0.0,0.034301739792260866,0.0,0.031591113696920935,0.06372991588480678,0.0,0.041504923601984565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03268395218078212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029793023831314987,0.037523570662198,0.08979816009011768,0.047172963829984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043201121095041234,0.0962822805876709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055060975979314634,0.04418481959522305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339977073013948,0.0,0.03417495151827304,0.0,0.2609541986492216,0.10273504987368784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03308377694952118,0.0,0.04810629959096182,0.0,0.04580497072382448,0.034319395055864184,0.0,0.049227006629405816,0.044926152289584034,0.0,0.09401399250309246,0.4876681669358626,0.04050284418624835,0.0,0.03231138522699558,0.03454117847691572,0.0,0.03956503493996761,0.14743484495942835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02505870633194092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835356566363052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051692887355522285,0.0,0.0,0.24820854664192704,0.1267370125609765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0386391282703215,0.0,0.0,0.04797936011288703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043642568503513404,0.0,0.09158329880471258,0.0,0.0,0.08302227446404753
mentalhealth,pdarigan,2020/02/09,"Doctor who and mental health (spoiler free) I'm sure we have some Whovians on here.

Tonights episode of Doctor Who touched off of poor mental health in a thoughtful and sensitive way.

If you've watched it and want links to more advice, or if you haven't watched it and just want some advice, here are some useful links. 

The BBC advice line, with links to various resources: https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/articles/1NGvFrTqWChr03LrYlw2Hkk/information-and-support-mental-health 

The NHS mood self assessment test (if you're feeling low but you don't know if you're feeling *that* low): https://www.nhs.uk/conditions/stress-anxiety-depression/mood-self-assessment/

A link for various mental health resources around the world shared by u/quickhakker https://checkpointorg.com/global/.

It's okay to not be okay, and sometimes it can be hard to ask for help, but you owe it to yourself and you are definitely worth it, you beautiful person :)",8.989807692307693,12.469531047297304,5.752702702702703,74.09583160083162,62.851351351351354,7.526819126819128,30.303534303534303,8.384062270229773,2.401683367983368,777,28,114,11,13,212,90,148,0.033,0.728,0.23800000000000002,0.9819,1,0,0,0,0,0,54.0,1,5,0,0,4,8,0,0,5,2,8,5,0,1,1,33,18,13,0,6,9,0,4,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,9,9,0,0,8,0,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,6,6,6,15,15,6,9,0,2,2,0,13,7,0,8,1,66,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36549131544209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098670109755207,0.11655378942081154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552191835460634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607830511393178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168382677229388,0.0,0.0,0.5300924798272227,0.0,0.0,0.08356666189355773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851782218915782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5025701240098592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886092874673688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601253026100525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12330622794341735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14281417164005533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14147909869979047,0.11750420221712167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897759423379614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767870304122057,0.0,0.0,0.14707245233326202,0.09896078249580373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jackso115,2020/02/09,"Get really down when I underperform in school. My teacher for a certain subject has praised me to my parents, I’m top of the class and I love the subject. We had a test recently and i know I definitely did not do as well as I usually do.  I’ve been really down and have had anxiety about my teacher correcting it and seeing I didn’t do that well. My parents put 0 pressure on me to do well they say it’s up to me what I do. But I still don’t know why I feel this way. I’m almost embarrassed to go to the class again. Anyone know how I can overcome these negative thoughts/feelings.",1.5840798226164097,3.3038474227642283,3.928632668144864,86.81228381374723,78.83739837398375,7.724759793052478,27.4419807834442,8.575989854853784,2.018177235772358,455,20,100,10,11,158,75,123,0.127,0.757,0.11599999999999999,0.1904,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,1,2,8,8,0,2,5,0,14,1,0,1,2,15,24,9,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,2,3,0,5,3,19,6,15,19,0,14,1,0,1,1,7,6,0,1,5,73,25,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18708058944707406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429224003623356,0.0,0.0,0.13063401700091826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18893102882174626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760957183520423,0.0,0.10617828025706844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30802625306055004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686189646019268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41489929331053016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18781307433071895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23937275034077635,0.0,0.18446945488373234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485725959664243,0.0,0.1890792378589648,0.14887719785364395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14920055154198714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20576391539226585,0.0,0.0,0.14829484289974995,0.0,0.0,0.5039406352865031,0.0,0.16858261124260834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elizakai,2020/02/09,"Dissertation survey on common dream themes and mental health My psychology dissertation is on the common themes of dreams in mental health compared to those without conditions, would be really helpful if you could take part :) 

https://qfreeaccountssjc1.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_6V6Ra44sqG0rOUB",13.596249999999998,18.724518125000003,7.485000000000002,59.21000000000001,55.25,10.0,32.5,10.125756701596842,4.492249999999999,255,9,26,6,4,65,34,40,0.0,0.759,0.24100000000000002,0.8687,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,5,5,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,6,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,17,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21933555889075512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5840130326718374,0.0,0.0,0.18413398227654845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5536911264029336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974868414641325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598784683133076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20654959390378036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648130241639419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19514786138682336,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anon-made-2-get-help,2020/02/09,"Speaking to People Who Don’t Exist I’m not sure if this fits the rules, but oh well.

I don’t know what to call it, or why it happens. My mother says that it’s because I have an extremely reactive imagination, and i agree partially.

My issue is that when alone, I will speak to nothing as if there is somebody there. In the moment, I actually believe there is someone there, and that they aren’t in my head so I have to explain my thought process to them. After a bit, I once again realize that they don’t exist. I don’t have a face or a name for them, and I don’t ever hear a hallucinatory response, but I still feel like they exist sometimes. 

It’s usually when I’m completely by myself, but when people are around me and I can’t speak out loud, I can have these one-sided conversations in my head.

I know that a lot of people, if not everyone, talks to themselves when they’re alone. However, I don’t think it’s exactly the same, as I look up to where I’d assume this “ghost-like” person is (obviously not seeing anything there, though), and explain how I’m feeling as if they were a completely different person than me.

Sometimes (Extremely rarely), I will be thinking of someone speaking and get a very short auditory hallucination, typically just the very last word or words of the sentence. It never lasts more than about a second. I once heard a little girl screaming, which fit the situation I was thinking about (It was a scene from a book I had read).

I was wondering if anyone here could help me out in figuring out what’s going on. If it helps, I’ve been diagnosed professionally with severe depression, ADD, and severe anxiety, and I currently take medication for my ADD.",5.0304338214976525,5.9188381458966575,6.2744915722575305,76.71327922077924,68.75683890577508,9.50765404807958,30.76001657916552,9.688023934748609,2.8464942249240126,1326,52,255,29,22,447,173,329,0.076,0.85,0.073,-0.2056,4,2,0,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,6,0,22,5,0,0,18,0,28,5,3,1,5,58,50,30,0,7,16,1,2,1,0,2,2,9,0,3,20,15,0,0,15,2,0,1,12,2,1,1,8,13,37,3,33,38,4,30,0,1,2,0,26,15,0,12,15,183,57,3,0.0,0.0,0.1063512039124631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22574601544157685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337131798585237,0.0,0.0,0.07620310142805957,0.0,0.0896833156597595,0.09701753503521196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643472347635765,0.0,0.0,0.12278596299401623,0.0,0.0,0.11898066918028515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128332252492314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285321659149957,0.0,0.0,0.0870136622126567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386647181680688,0.11061494845700856,0.0,0.11386352192534326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985809150902837,0.0,0.1041374538190441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020965811768596,0.07785712330952639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056938860747543674,0.0,0.061937269063918075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637286920395588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22369498305713093,0.0,0.12283120368192547,0.0,0.14609735162608173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374942062046516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978786915975212,0.17767057446516532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05324334699791063,0.10922910068775024,0.0,0.0,0.09151785620982568,0.0,0.0,0.09265302845427184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978840819259056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405402637307073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045716527705962,0.0,0.0,0.23212562192770686,0.07384936584115716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266642402584729,0.19031863933624385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901199716011742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08666726217092417,0.0,0.0,0.08684494642989336,0.0,0.0,0.246238419905686,0.0,0.0,0.12250090174784585,0.0,0.0,0.18468104555917708,0.0,0.21557296813508367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703356922872975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271472115712492,0.0,0.08194128067969418,0.08759600929209489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094947659471492,0.1070747577755529,0.08651993546360216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002883226626405,0.1798439603042339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979883602196005,0.0,0.0983397595699543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11818687773208605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ruthimon,2020/02/09,"Let me make you a spotify playlist Howdy y’all! I’m back making playlists again. If you’ve already had one made, I will still make you one! There is no cap. Here’s the original text:


Howdy y’all, I’ve had depression/anxiety for a long time and after several years of the battle with my mental health, I know the struggle intimately. Music is basically what helps me stay alive from one day to the next. If you’ll let me, I want to make you a spotify playlist so you have something to listen to on the especially hard days, or maybe just days that you need a reminder that somebody cares.  Drop a descriptor for your music taste/what you’d want and maybe a few of your favorite songs and I’ll give you a link to the playlist I make for you :)",2.6768307692307687,4.52718496,3.5420000000000016,90.21946153846157,76.06666666666666,7.282051282051282,24.871794871794872,8.139509932561175,1.304964102564103,584,20,127,10,13,186,89,150,0.07400000000000001,0.7909999999999999,0.134,0.8312,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,13,0,0,7,3,1,1,13,0,10,1,0,7,0,20,24,7,0,5,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,0,3,3,3,21,1,14,16,1,15,0,0,0,0,16,1,0,3,12,77,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635447357946893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133742238447132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395829004045666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511019487448811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867343402867309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216898747280213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327599986639612,0.0,0.0,0.15753193400402082,0.0,0.0,0.09933676380878327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081448014857481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030934379647196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311542214492777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023243883527106,0.4946303630992818,0.0,0.2977779187200763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493528895820565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989000157312667,0.0,0.0,0.15761464662959254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012767964788413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742622290254006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140932402170196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15796375171736524,0.11835441250211233,0.0,0.0,0.15493304446535086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641785384480605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17482691218199858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954373127574742
mentalhealth,peterpan21048,2020/02/09,"I’m finally going to a psychologist The appointment is today and I’m freaking out. 
Anyone have any advice? I’m not sure what to even say?",-0.12642857142856911,2.01516778571429,3.45114285714286,80.29385714285716,103.28571428571428,6.525714285714287,19.88571428571429,7.554174236665415,1.6516771428571428,110,4,20,3,5,40,23,28,0.18899999999999997,0.8109999999999999,0.0,-0.6276,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,11,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3897953504971928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27126212081459217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789164964379713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634662320911501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43696972034482096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22670108909613015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172171298487901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3759535979620818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3781055983698974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Berns429,2020/02/09,"Can someone recommend a good stress ball or fidget tool? When i get into deep thought, brainstorming, and conversation at the office i pick at my hands or touch my face, i would like to find a “fidget” tool to not do this in front of people. I’m sure there is underlying reasons why i do this. I’m fairly socially awkward/ anxious, and really don’t relate or build strong feelings/relationships with others.  But i love deep thinking, brainstorming, thinking outside the box and finding solutions to challenging scenarios.  I just don’t wanna be fidgeting awkwardly in front of people.",8.522243589743589,9.064641096153846,8.416153846153849,65.59551282051285,61.115384615384606,11.933333333333335,38.487179487179496,11.538034831475384,4.921691025641025,470,22,72,13,6,152,72,104,0.066,0.74,0.19399999999999998,0.9169,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,3,9,0,3,4,0,8,3,2,2,1,21,15,8,0,2,6,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,6,1,0,2,3,3,0,0,1,2,8,6,13,12,0,11,0,0,0,1,3,8,0,3,2,47,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609729052791565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4222736375370736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069196933819885,0.0,0.0,0.19375826749618486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128586754102229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20849343484400715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203032536558307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479894240971847,0.2375143516595709,0.0,0.2480157776733441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354832207726583,0.19573204306635408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26461849727658016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21772198835243053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29604076531975265,0.0,0.18339428047946132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20844848475923872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410121573969846,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justPluto,2020/02/09,"I don't know what to do My mental health hasn't been perfect for a veryy long time, but recently, its been getting really bad, im not sure what it is that's wrong with my mental health, and im considering seeing my gp, would be nice to have some advice or guidance :)",3.1483928571428565,4.030262767857145,4.620000000000001,86.875,73.10714285714286,7.742857142857144,22.92857142857143,8.07648339933343,0.9743714285714296,209,5,46,3,4,70,44,56,0.21,0.672,0.11800000000000001,-0.7254,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,0,2,10,12,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,1,4,3,4,8,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21219281221047276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18130805697569885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344995851934014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4616326405325372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4691104467802751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193379056840393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19216760699158894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4376647136647827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910945456594534,0.0,0.21440573512583255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17303745527628528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046577803210459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661973050656022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425447294238276,0.23741534722513946,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,da102730,2020/02/09,"Would you listen to a Men's Comedy Mental Health Podcast?  

Hi, I have a comedy / mental health podcast called ""Men Don't Talk""

​([https://mendonttalk.podbean.com/](https://mendonttalk.podbean.com/))​

I am a middle aged failed stand up comic looking to try and get men to talk openly about life sh\\\*t..​

I am on here because I do a section called MADVICE - advice you would be mad to follow because we are not experts but... I think this forum is GREAT.. so really interesting questions.​

I am planning to engage with some people questions on here and ask them if they mind me/us talking about the issue on the pod.​

Men don't talk openly and help each other, it has to change!​

WHAT DO YOU THINK!!!!????",4.307523041474654,7.460280604838713,4.0417050691244265,81.86112903225808,77.62903225806451,5.478341013824887,21.76036866359447,6.868970318607317,0.7632529953917051,561,16,93,6,14,170,82,124,0.052000000000000005,0.823,0.125,0.8401,0,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,1,3,2,2,5,5,1,0,6,0,14,3,0,0,0,18,21,6,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,4,4,8,0,0,3,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,2,12,3,13,18,3,11,0,1,1,0,21,8,0,3,1,61,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573899469117058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899371797565733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19430652897314526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3254785299153376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326663991818765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757110366936986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388154509298669,0.0,0.0,0.1068254212600714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634565432739784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257097886530408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338345073831982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212241819498738,0.0,0.16092289284978528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049026639066853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17853600378171655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10209943673609574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5123970004482212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20424159073840506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820487795272117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19170799603131067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22643025739094655,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RayKait37,2020/02/09,"I want help- Depressed AF Hey guys. 

I (F 21) suffer from severe depression and anxiety. I also am bipolar. I get panic attacks at work and have mental breakdowns so often. I dont know what to do anymore, I'm at this breaking point where I feel like I have no hope in life. Like I'm not going to or ever get better. I have been going to therapy for at least two months now. But nothing is helping. I  am very insecure about myself and I can't help but compare myself to EVERYONE. 

A little bit about me. As a child I went through something traumatic that resulted in me having trust issues with anybody I come in contact with. I just recently told two people about my experience. I also got into my first relationship about 7 months ago to the most sweetest and kindest guy ever. He has shown me what love is and how it's possible to be happy. Hes always there when I need someone and I am so very grateful. Hes the complete opposite of me. He an extrovert and loves socializing. Where in return, I , an introvert prefers to listen and stay quiet. When I'm surrounded by too many people my anxiety skyrockets. Our views are sometimes on the opposite spectrum which does cause arguments here and there. 

I get way too jelous which affects my relationship with my bf. Hes also very into social media which because of how I get I have deleted my social media. I cant help but compare myself to everyone he follows. And he still follows alot of his ex flings and exes. I trust him just the people he follows aren't so good. I ask him to unfollow certain people because of how I feel and he says it makes my insecurities win. 

Another thing, I get so emotionally exhausted at work. Like I'm so tired of it. I compare myself to everyone once again.  I could go on and on.

What should I do? What can I do? What can others do for me?I want to be ok. I want be happy. But I'm in a huge slump I feel like I'm worse than I have ever been. Usually I'm able to contain it but these past couple of weeks have been so hard and fustrating. I Know this is long and all over the place but my mind is all over and I'm just trying to get some advice. Anything will help pls. 

Thank you!!",1.5672082379862682,3.8641224599542334,3.695320366132723,85.48952517162472,81.83752860411899,6.545995423340961,23.916475972540045,7.7425588080867325,1.4123244851258576,1693,63,334,30,46,577,216,437,0.11,0.716,0.175,0.9872,0,0,1,0,0,0,48.0,1,1,0,5,35,25,1,3,11,1,38,6,0,7,6,65,78,38,0,8,11,1,4,4,1,2,4,3,0,3,18,22,0,1,6,0,0,8,6,8,0,3,6,8,57,17,49,66,7,52,0,3,1,2,37,23,0,6,22,234,75,2,0.07725687644901129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549452552848702,0.06848355955886191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185346888552401,0.0642839101249128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101057110793722,0.1182025980442476,0.0,0.07661806189544508,0.0,0.0,0.06357582660504912,0.0,0.0722247505681065,0.08789085012555993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419014962183048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832742900567902,0.08434449972674893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936409349918792,0.0,0.06654995826947782,0.08100236508320374,0.0,0.0,0.061683329395284016,0.08548326434155609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13308246895984682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760801320543287,0.0,0.09054448381904906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690358751385131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20964980336333905,0.0,0.2214667686532079,0.0,0.07557204959944519,0.0,0.0,0.11719019412607885,0.110384655943655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571465964083538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24218117570774356,0.0,0.13172058981416865,0.06479940253775432,0.06178938164625066,0.0,0.0,0.1529929079866675,0.0,0.16448276313150542,0.06920698650129202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589182788935474,0.0,0.0,0.07673351027665053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063610704612173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849167177090198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545688165932105,0.15097522974969396,0.07743168631159063,0.0,0.06836990452525213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13945469461014764,0.0,0.051569564939192326,0.07832634677305524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785676044933712,0.0,0.07800742175366601,0.0,0.12333140341601186,0.0,0.0,0.0572849949686149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413005658230652,0.0,0.0,0.08227605202651275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064429858898224,0.0,0.0,0.07375043036836569,0.2142407623272673,0.0,0.08071699260126622,0.0,0.07303271987361151,0.08709552013726861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628184515437755,0.1658899454546956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061437769016219536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727828009178643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362609690557047,0.06545950070720716,0.059476117919933284,0.07640902626128783,0.0,0.0,0.08234555094014759,0.0616974413289561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112775204554908,0.08834997122298995,0.0,0.05132603584023887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879541453249998,0.0,0.07382225621773597,0.0,0.05245234783431959,0.0,0.15093748485495714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508753463929404,0.19123504219521584,0.13670432215882414,0.06132291251362641,0.06197080622444704,0.0,0.0,0.0716178984717577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248785235967572,0.0,0.07873135734114804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dkwtdrn,2020/02/09,"Anyone else being reminded constantly of how useless they are? I (21M) graduated high school with a 60% and I was fine with that average since I completed my credit requirements for college and decided to lay back instead of work hard for a high average. 

My parents reminded me constantly that summer of how a 60 was extremely disappointing that summer and they confiscated 90% of the shit I owned that entire summer.

You’d think I’d be free of their control in college but I made the fucking mistake of going to a college close enough to commute to. Although I was fine with my grade at first their constant reminders of how disappointed they are with my average made me feel like a low-life scumbag. 

The college I was so happy to attend became a constant reminder of how I’m in a place that doesn’t fit me because I didn’t try hard enough. I fell into depression and went from a 6 pack toned guy to the fattest shit you’ll ever see.

My parents started addressing my rapid weight gain every time I ate something. “What did you have for breakfast?”

“Cereal”

“You realize the hormones in cereal will just keep enlarging your breasts just like women? You need to fix yourself ASAP.”

It’s always some comment like that every morning with my mom. Her short temper always makes me feel useless. Just this morning I went to get breakfast and I forgot 2 out of the 5 items she asked for.

“Forgetting” wasn’t an allowable excuse and she told be to get the hell out of her face. I’m just so done with this. 

I just wake up most mornings now and breakdown in tears when I look in the mirror. Her idea of motivating me is to send me pictures every few days of my highschool years and tell me “wow you used to look so good back then! You should get back to the gym ASAP”

I wake up every morning feeling anxious and when I really sink into my thoughts. I end up thinking about the past like my best years are behind me. 

I already feel Iike I’ve lived my life to its fullest extent and there’s nothing enjoyable ahead of me when I’m only 21. I find myself thinking about my past and how much simpler things used to be. I just wish I can be happy for once but I don’t know where to begin. I can’t afford professional help and moving out isn’t an option at this moment.",4.2159298604017685,5.603765991011237,5.1549336057201245,82.12226081035072,71.1123595505618,7.820905686074227,28.99046646237657,8.296473431620573,2.0737116104868907,1786,69,339,27,33,584,225,445,0.09699999999999999,0.736,0.16699999999999998,0.9890000000000001,3,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,8,5,8,27,25,5,0,20,0,27,12,6,13,1,70,63,27,0,4,8,3,7,4,0,3,1,0,1,2,13,24,4,4,14,1,2,7,6,11,0,1,16,10,63,15,59,38,10,57,1,5,3,2,30,22,4,3,32,231,76,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438078690985788,0.0,0.14233005122924905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966207722315457,0.0,0.059802223464868014,0.08763216174244666,0.0,0.0,0.07995587409355863,0.0,0.0,0.19729414774479168,0.0,0.05213625304884156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975494438785181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967306709859509,0.3696957063677723,0.09592541236440816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551576149054694,0.0,0.07366397978889139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752345891202445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144654295812412,0.0,0.0757512277542526,0.17674378784987918,0.0,0.0,0.07736375295913524,0.2882395711781393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17297937955878784,0.0611002570660941,0.0,0.0,0.07816981021116476,0.07274892624778287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906801134188518,0.13405243659830055,0.0,0.048606767125625165,0.07173569766448472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468483166760273,0.0,0.18208942220024424,0.15323016156003008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05732671181248807,0.1807272065277752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654917943355393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760200177464429,0.0,0.0,0.04700321106113201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06041000342184522,0.1671360076173551,0.0,0.07552160037518693,0.0,0.14364169398675922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16185477157976705,0.05708970413749615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016778079674114,0.0,0.0909012955359216,0.06287192982482691,0.06341692853396022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206512897616874,0.0,0.0,0.0910830927763964,0.0,0.06504687259912638,0.0,0.0,0.1899344506400484,0.0,0.1632897331869153,0.0,0.0,0.0893571476103852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054790563116414566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865575375740705,0.06815366823485497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755837578454972,0.07074853009726077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584259493558962,0.0,0.0,0.060536204279077674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475406332872651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056820107055874126,0.16440607499051835,0.0,0.06789860803296767,0.04987127839549045,0.0,0.0,0.08172438086694064,0.0,0.05806698238988948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773513355000745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414842076088164,0.0,0.15856812596821265,0.0,0.0,0.09835142859018617,0.0,0.0,0.06226442105773575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015271919140704
mentalhealth,Stef4nos,2020/02/09,"Does anyone else struggle with this? This has been going on for about a year (after a break up). 

There are random days that I feel sad. I don't know the reason, I've gotten over the break up so it's not that. I've tried figuring out the reason but I can't . My life right now is pretty good, no major issues...it's just random mood swings .
Whenever this happens I lay on my bed  scrolling through my phone for hours, feeling empty.",0.4465909090909115,2.817493204545457,1.8777272727272736,95.84909090909092,88.54545454545455,4.1090909090909085,15.954545454545453,5.565023196281405,-0.7042181818181823,334,7,71,2,11,107,65,88,0.1,0.785,0.114,0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,5,0,6,1,0,2,0,13,12,2,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,2,7,1,12,10,1,15,0,1,0,0,1,7,0,2,5,43,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17490645341169614,0.25630201900730104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16132214226836109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189026406099204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20896315744302005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25296057603742145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216256114199122,0.2098088621885392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22120145298136606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24634138539185735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374725632148726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668405682793112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544863072416713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5143792470803793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213621551190646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615047498285257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16983130996962836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16108449093654448
mentalhealth,thehistorianrabbit,2020/02/09,"Do I have sociopathic? Hi guys, I think I have sociopathy I don't know. Could someone please help me somehow? Really know if I have sociopathy? I'm really confused and I've looked up the trades and I feel like I have most of them. But I don't know. I'm kind of scared.",-0.9933333333333324,1.0869738771929849,1.5782456140350902,95.02771929824564,99.70175438596493,6.042105263157895,16.859649122807017,7.3871296695380915,0.4355122807017544,209,6,49,5,9,71,34,57,0.11,0.738,0.152,0.308,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,8,0,0,0,0,13,16,4,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,5,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,10,2,3,15,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,4,1,28,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253127447131735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268817064445072,0.20160284836040104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794211366188151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18915187829785432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29386657946233324,0.465267170075513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378680582423549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369758822758989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3097694924492085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615674996454032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28253018569122984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391060910052366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808215687755535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xaspenx,2020/02/09,"can anyone offer advice? I’ve (18F, UK) been sad for a long time, but always just seen it as nothing and tried to hide it. I recently went to my GP after having several panic attacks and it’s a possibility that I have generalised anxiety disorder. I have started an online CBT thing but I dunno how much it’s helping. I feel a bit lost, like no one truly understands how I feel. I struggle to explain my feelings to people because I don’t even know what is going on myself. 
I always have negative thoughts and I feel like shit. I’m always scared that people are going to abandon me or replace me. I often have thoughts about death as well. The other day I had a dream that my best friend wanted to end her life and I had no choice but to to shoot her in the head several times to kill her. I always end up spiralling and getting in a really bad mood but I feel like I can’t tell anyone because they will find me annoying. 

There’s more to the story than what I’ve just written above but it would take forever to write everything out. 

I just want all the sadness and worry to go away. can anyone offer advice?",2.4488666666666674,4.356904764444444,4.268611111111113,84.49625000000002,76.91111111111111,6.811111111111113,24.13888888888889,7.734863291789972,1.3250222222222219,872,29,170,13,20,295,133,225,0.28600000000000003,0.594,0.12,-0.9939,0,0,0,1,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,10,19,4,3,10,0,16,3,2,2,1,37,39,16,2,3,9,0,5,3,1,2,1,0,0,0,12,7,0,1,11,1,0,4,5,12,1,1,9,6,28,6,24,28,5,19,0,4,1,0,11,6,1,3,12,119,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161338963864424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3680778671828478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08460079687719743,0.0,0.0,0.23198061135683615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581171787870965,0.10390263784063823,0.0,0.09233775732597324,0.13482887597794407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605703860172042,0.0,0.12073528005569553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132119000153171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674534589261005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958992504215271,0.0,0.0,0.073043435786858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993908669112646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795873066892718,0.15801056847079936,0.0,0.0,0.10107695729790024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544130675701052,0.0,0.05777853953729507,0.0,0.18855197851474695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349690925646562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412592644458399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235108756000455,0.0,0.060777191916626526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811275631527308,0.1620855838645883,0.0,0.0,0.0978683802379541,0.0,0.0,0.1207216914854621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129613400587428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611377352411876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493842426837706,0.0,0.0,0.12975315297438533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333790894917754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467323950508558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084657610764876,0.0,0.1091939601007338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107195548433543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498697039830659,0.11351870975515915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782759395009938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561233744216864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314967077546502,0.0,0.0966602483300264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347086450682498,0.0,0.0,0.17559169418975815,0.12897145491732853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508312843009178,0.0,0.0,0.1151277493791096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045730841284695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943339699481328,0.10251773449366723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230918072280502,0.0,0.07855973047523608,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DracoMalfoyTrash,2020/02/09,"I think my friend MIGHT have an eating disorder So I'm 15m and I used to have anorexia, and I did a research project about different types of eating disorders for school, and I came across ""orthorexia"". I hadn't heard of this one before, so I looked into it a bit more.

 **Orthorexia** is the term for a condition that includes symptoms of obsessive behavior in pursuit of a healthy diet. **Orthorexia** sufferers often display signs and symptoms of anxiety disorders that frequently co-occur with anorexia nervosa or other eating disorders. 

This is what I copied and pasted from Google and I noticed it sounded ALOT like my friend (let's call him X for these purposes). He's also 15m, and he's a SUPER athlete. Like, name a sport, and X plays it. But lately I noticed that X has been dieting alot more than usual. He has completely cut out sweets, and he won't let himself eat anything with sugar content above 10%. I know you're thinking, ""Okaaaay, that's just a diet."" NO. This is becoming an obsessive/compulsive behavior that seems like it is taking over his life. X ~~tries to go~~ makes sure he goes to the gym everyday, eats only fruit for lunch (at school), and literally can't go an hour without making self-deprecating comments about his body.

Anyway, where I was going with this was, this aligns perfectly with the symptoms of orthorexia. The problem is, I don't know how to approach X about this. I really want to avoid sitting here and doing nothing, because I know how bad this could get (from personal experience). Do I go right up and ask him? Do I subtly bring it up? I'd like to thank you for reading down this far, and if anyone has been in this situation or something similar, I'd just like to know your opinion about what I should say to X about this. (:",3.1729448790576384,5.641367824925816,4.324478014567036,82.24714504091358,76.98219584569733,7.764373707400414,28.609747324880857,8.666027191798058,2.533980019782394,1395,62,254,31,33,455,187,337,0.07,0.7909999999999999,0.138,0.9709,1,1,1,0,0,0,64.0,0,2,0,2,16,19,1,2,16,0,27,16,1,5,2,53,51,22,0,5,7,0,0,5,2,3,4,3,0,1,24,20,11,1,7,4,0,7,6,6,0,1,8,7,26,13,42,37,6,28,0,1,1,0,21,13,0,9,12,167,50,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042749226485714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737134319705924,0.0,0.0,0.06157879499831478,0.0,0.07247199137944732,0.0,0.08233115918525623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353262579647933,0.053685088153301565,0.09726355775895844,0.07493889678899876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614682472119504,0.09782306178207832,0.0,0.0,0.08992669295701766,0.10072567893480626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923370252107515,0.0,0.0,0.07031467705424384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920117205603002,0.4037316201243747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4505748367344543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614684573622503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608135651694495,0.0,0.046011597529539885,0.0,0.20020300082107012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672867910105167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19359822631988535,0.0,0.09934389742698577,0.0,0.0,0.18010982864911507,0.06220463054766975,0.21512649015366755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739544611783343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757138728002567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342562646298254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450307465076977,0.20053070641162932,0.0,0.0,0.05967677003515846,0.0669792492818635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840703273445484,0.0,0.07689708329725126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426863711679419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809126268721577,0.0,0.05641825100315885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520910436064643,0.0,0.0700347554138183,0.0,0.17825788250043556,0.0,0.0801732810455301,0.0918735366894777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899148163885152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677986104994516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300251090718265,0.2746073417756089,0.06621574752620599,0.0,0.0,0.08108065767052272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128601067736352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059792004336734574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606198378450743,0.09699383250154407,0.0,0.05194445219236138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489386020220947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Flight487,2020/02/09,"Help with a friend I don't know where else to look, I've got a friend who is being told that she can't be depressed because teenagers in a middle class home can't get depression. She's suicidal and I don't know how to get help for her, I've already called the hotline and they weren't any help at all. Should I go to the police?",2.7783333333333324,3.377319055555557,3.6287777777777817,94.694,73.7222222222222,6.871111111111111,24.12222222222222,6.742157984588678,0.4699022222222222,260,7,63,2,5,83,49,72,0.06,0.669,0.27,0.9287,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,5,0,9,0,0,1,1,8,17,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,3,1,7,2,7,11,1,5,0,2,1,0,12,4,0,0,0,35,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450808004250282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510281766327573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538342968654898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267777614171909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3825699640838433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855269118756343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3431709138495477,0.0,0.232064735038464,0.0,0.12621833090455953,0.0,0.17762490959121902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4465848466645504,0.0,0.2227734353248293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24410867861084926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18649887593279293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24292938524658514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122156143520952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drlenguy54,2020/02/09,"Will This Psychologist Be Good? I am 15. This psychologist specializes in children and adolescents. I have been hearing voices and thinking the FBI are monitoring me and my parents are planning to kill me for 3 to 4 months. I’ve been depressed and I’ve been isolating myself for about a year, and I don’t want to make friends or be with others. I have psychotic episodes every few days to everyday that last from a few minutes to hours long. 


This psychologist doesn’t seem to specialize in psychosis. It seems like she only works with Autism, Depression, and Anxiety. Is she not going to be able to diagnose me? Do I need to go to the hospital? I been managing ok. I’ve not considered hurting anyone, but I am pretty suicidal. Is this lady even going to be able to do anything? She said that the only tests they can give people my age are ADHD and Autism tests. I’m losing hope that I’ll get help and it’s getting worse. I saw a stray cat today and jumped to the conclusion that it was sent here by the FBI to spy on me and I’ve been hearing voices inside and whispers outside my head off and on all day, I have coping methods that are ok, but I just want the voices to stop.",3.4269973009446697,5.1403210384615425,4.744781826360775,82.98062753036439,73.65811965811966,8.003238866396762,27.273054430949173,8.6894789155246,2.06928547008547,929,35,182,18,19,308,131,234,0.10400000000000001,0.785,0.111,-0.6347,1,0,1,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,1,4,4,13,1,0,9,2,27,2,1,1,1,31,47,15,2,4,6,1,0,1,1,1,1,7,0,1,13,14,0,1,4,0,0,5,4,5,0,0,9,8,22,8,27,33,3,21,0,4,1,0,13,5,0,4,12,121,35,4,0.2785192887895362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16736303031221844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653324679158896,0.0,0.0,0.09737358130883284,0.0,0.11459882164619772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17962189994337754,0.0,0.2398882553161158,0.14134560766820414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197968173375794,0.0,0.11733225662180488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759165581091383,0.0,0.14551483293281586,0.1335905403797533,0.2374333954479335,0.1168043825892548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14292057155741264,0.0,0.31391148063114577,0.0,0.09334280417049463,0.0,0.0,0.13831624892757868,0.13714269800968082,0.0,0.1490803295610722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407016348994307,0.0,0.0,0.11351519691887793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803522797493926,0.0,0.0,0.12324040304392485,0.0,0.1557959208402656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295689400236852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115571954139818,0.0,0.0,0.10325926176617363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21182646968426733,0.0,0.0,0.1546313548325863,0.0,0.0,0.0965451029988577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14167712309535874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246781195710927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535535000610674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642729834812406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15232744821297112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923195707018038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200185968341965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16427789271401316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138267969375103,0.0,0.1419174749225317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967864518344107
mentalhealth,Miimmoouuu,2020/02/09,"I smoke every night to help with not feeling emotions. I want to stop, does anyone have any advice? I have been smoking weed every single night before bed since the summer probably, and it honestly makes me feel pretty bad about myself. I know I need to stop, and I want to, but I get very bored and anxious and sad at night, and smoking helps me not feel that way. My mental health isn’t the best, I have pretty bad anxiety to the point where my limbs go numb. I want to stop smoking, but that means I need to preoccupy myself before bed and find another way to wind down. The idea of sitting in my bed with a nice book and a glass of water seems so refreshing and appealing, but when it comes down to it at night, I worry that I won’t be able to fall asleep, so I smoke. Does anyone have any suggestions on how to refrain from smoking every night? Or any ideas on how to relax and unwind before bed, and ways to clear my head so I don’t have thoughts coming at me a hundred miles a minute? I want to stop smoking so badly, I only have two pipe bowls so it’s not like I smoke a ton, but I feel almost guilty and it feels unhealthy. I want to make the right healthy choices, and that starts with quitting smoking. Does anyone have any advice? Thank you in advance.",5.244192708333337,5.112179929687503,5.585531249999999,85.41467708333334,68.0625,8.076666666666666,27.222916666666666,7.3011,1.2691716666666664,986,26,206,8,15,315,127,256,0.20199999999999999,0.67,0.128,-0.9394,0,0,3,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,3,10,12,0,0,10,0,12,5,2,4,1,55,36,25,0,7,8,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,4,0,9,17,1,5,12,3,0,5,6,6,0,1,2,5,29,6,31,32,3,34,0,1,0,0,4,13,0,3,13,124,38,1,0.08513311821817664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16638219565823753,0.0,0.0,0.08524852044205583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23157375890950746,0.08926949734507789,0.06512660241731354,0.09617619140785592,0.0,0.1785811671052251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132477930983617,0.0,0.0,0.21732603975968756,0.0,0.0893419552739731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666928628701206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22350169636405834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576329939100256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151849715802842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21522931267551088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781012773493623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044478540529122035,0.0,0.048383112976869015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873711401970498,0.090492523661839,0.0,0.0,0.11412586922505999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19220985605911373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046786935349326014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04159174132149878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136540349602597,0.0,0.0,0.09273492336840594,0.0,0.0,0.08579415964082122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12625025688190786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39945832186085134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474757265015409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047831417179586,0.0,0.0,0.17322197427270578,0.0917879003760506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09054955046768616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727032177988677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750199344951894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042299513144508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06025765925258016,0.0,0.0,0.2847003953563491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837913726014195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758618640364818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831626861732627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024373839140054,0.2510685942405804,0.20272411986333702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645681401045732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChrisTchaik,2020/02/09,"Why do I feel so ashamed for feeling lazy? It's like I prepare a list of mental tasks, and I berrate myself for not getting all of them in one day, even though I technically could have. And my feeling of laziness and tendency to procrastinate is kinda chronic, but the alternative is anxiety instead of a healthy dose of motivation. Can you relate?",6.839307692307693,7.52611073846154,7.4490384615384615,70.59971153846155,64.69230769230771,10.192307692307693,40.865384615384606,10.125756701596842,4.4060000000000015,278,16,48,6,4,92,52,65,0.09300000000000001,0.737,0.17,0.6403,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,1,4,2,0,1,3,0,6,2,0,1,1,12,10,6,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,8,1,9,9,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,38,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681026311887083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798155571024735,0.0,0.0,0.22601913226273956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231476984241012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.531612670356974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18310203979136305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712181331456891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3531834778197089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374822633485483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3443273416691188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31623763337463034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LeeAnthony27,2020/02/09,"Ssri sexual sides I just came off of cymbata after about 6 weeks. I noticed a very small improvement with depression and anxiety. However, my sex drive was cut in half and my ability to orgasm was also extremely reduced. I am thinking about trying an ssri. I tried lexaoro in the past for about a month which wasn’t long enough but I noticed no sexual side effects. What are your experiences with specifically ssri medications as far as sexual side effects? Thanks!",4.263452380952383,7.278465107142857,5.609523809523811,71.46880952380955,76.5,9.447619047619048,29.57142857142857,9.725611199111238,3.8168428571428574,375,17,58,12,9,125,63,84,0.099,0.81,0.091,0.2218,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,2,5,3,1,0,4,0,5,3,1,2,0,10,8,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,2,0,1,4,0,8,1,14,4,1,15,0,1,0,2,1,8,0,0,5,41,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18716152531547603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903978900589074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676791562729298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015781172088505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418256526815556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22893581086876705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071178380693765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357704533521902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868083173361159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.532911675222582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234174495437569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21547238266169672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14996323915370566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177952919648941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19310732686460502,0.0,0.0,0.1877325922531175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hollywood_hikes247,2020/02/09,"How to focus my hate into a productive outlet  

23 y/o M

I have a very hard past and was recently admitted to an inpatient mental health unit for suicidal ideation. I took a week off of work following my release after a 5 day hold. And I've been unable to function or motivate myself to leave my bedroom over the last week I've been off of work. Nearly everyone I've ever become close to in my entire life have crossed, betrayed, or intentionally hurt me. It made me develop into a cold hearted, calculated husk of my former self. How can I channel my hate for this world into something productive and healthier than killing myself. I have hope somewhere deep down that I can function in this society productively, even though I am incapable of feeling the emotional regards for what the general populace can. There are a few good people out there, and I'm hoping some of you are in this sub so you can perhaps help save me from myself. I know this most definitely comes off psychotic, edgy, or melodramatic. I'm really grasping at straws at this point.",5.108408710217756,6.81801756281407,6.305608040201008,73.48390619765495,69.35175879396985,9.929782244556117,32.36214405360134,10.203070172399654,3.6736389279732,841,38,145,23,15,282,128,199,0.13699999999999998,0.747,0.11599999999999999,-0.8225,0,0,1,0,0,1,18.0,0,2,0,3,8,8,3,0,10,0,13,3,1,5,1,30,26,11,2,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,8,10,0,1,5,1,0,4,0,4,0,0,5,3,21,4,31,21,3,32,0,1,0,0,5,19,0,7,9,101,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17596998612757794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137250651731594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275613993522456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17922737044840667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523746882101626,0.14412516999887112,0.0,0.15224882241328086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805631886110099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336403577311285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427304276167879,0.3146152814049418,0.0,0.16936276385936067,0.0,0.1888095199947828,0.1067970692918087,0.0,0.0,0.31650581214424217,0.0,0.0,0.1705685020679097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17627756174949882,0.0,0.08756485467111177,0.12987707471135498,0.0,0.16870987968400708,0.0,0.0,0.11254110199908213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507640566596107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16056946377204628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521006909208864,0.1104609417553046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15062050617365125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207233906631044,0.0,0.1573214053768783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16621831803443216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266177409039618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17428365460427614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654315698790394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770240266497447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146581835023288,0.0,0.0,0.25561348988970345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23199159623415885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_STEAKnEGGS_,2020/02/09,"I don't have a bad life, so why am I so irritable and unhappy? For a long time I've had frustrations, on and off bad days, and hardships like everyone else. I have a decent life. I have a family, a cute ass pet, good grades, my health, and a future I'm trying to build.

But in the past few years, everything just feels.... off.

I'll just name a few of the things that seem to be troubling me:

My mom and dad have a pretty good relationship, but it's tested all of the time since they don't see eye to eye on a lot of things and sometimes I don't know how they're able to pay bills and I try to help rid them of stress. Yet, they tell me it's okay. I stress over this a lot, which isn't unusual, but I can't seem to shake it

I'm in college now, and I did pretty well. I'm in my second semester of sophomore year with good grades. It's impossible for me to panic, but I will feel a lot of tension when I have a lot to finish or drop the ball on a test. I used to be able to shrug it off and keep it moving, but now every mistake I've been making has been haunting me.

I have a condition called Fibrous Dysplasia on my lower right jaw. Look it up. But basically my bone turns itself into scar tissue on it's own and can grow outward from my skull, which makes my jaw seem a bit swollen. This has been the Bane of my existence since I was about 10 years old. I'm 19 now. Serious pain in multiple areas, sleep deprivation, missed school, nightmares, etc. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't miserable but I never told anyone how bad it really was, even if I was crying. I could do a whole story on that on its own since it's been with me for half of my life.

And finally, day to day I'm struggling to keep my cool now. I can hide it from everyone, but I have to isolate myself a lot more often to calm down. I'm pretty introverted, but I usually don't get annoyed when someone wants to interact. Now I get irritated, sometimes even pissed. I'll do one of the things I love, video games, and I'll very quickly get pissed and break things. I'll drop food on the floor and scream like a maniac out of anger. Feel guilty about harmless mistakes and failures in the past. Or I'll be plain annoyed with things I need to finish. I even find myself losing patience with friends and family without actually blowing up at them.

I cut myself off for a long time since middle school was kinda tough and convinced me that I didn't need friends or a love life (don't do that, live your life and talk to people). When I got to college I opened up and made new friends and had new experiences, but now I don't really have happy days anymore and I don't know why. I'm grateful for the life I have. I'm fine with the situation I'm in compared to others. Some people I know are missing a parent. Some of them have never had the fun I had growing up. Some of them are dealing with a disease or are locked up. Some of them are DEAD. It could definitely be worse. 

Note: I've tried to remedy this. I work out, try new things, and have hobbies. But things like anger management or yoga or whatever just haven't been doing the trick.

And here I am, asking the internet for help bc I don't want others to worry. 

So why? Why am I beginning to lose my emotional grip? Why am I mad at a video game? Why am I so violent? Why am I ready to cry after I'm enraged? Is any of it justified? Am I developing mental issues? Am I just a baby? Is this new or was it building up over the years? I'm a logical, patient person, but I feel completely stuck. Negative emotions are normal, but I'm in a lot of pain and stress now and I need an answer.",1.8910840976672103,3.3435052282321887,3.813462746576203,89.15180152447965,77.19261213720316,7.1345981488461705,22.585835741508564,7.903304296703973,0.9239242953469864,2785,80,627,44,63,945,305,758,0.221,0.644,0.134,-0.9978,2,0,0,0,0,1,95.0,0,1,7,3,30,58,13,8,41,2,70,23,10,6,3,109,119,56,1,12,27,3,5,3,3,1,10,2,1,1,35,35,1,2,13,6,2,4,17,37,1,3,22,12,74,21,89,89,19,87,0,6,4,3,31,39,3,24,44,408,109,11,0.10873205085870401,0.0,0.0530533984255967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03697076158240875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05391648863909952,0.038013989053256314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05082489490247225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13618008108932894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05935361909171631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05551379044940979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700174330575679,0.0,0.0,0.08681369500317204,0.0,0.11943705220451713,0.14024635525145807,0.05604898501349617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04541583815021,0.12230892228209984,0.0,0.0,0.060632489363527324,0.10772474117366887,0.0,0.04580572121167895,0.10389813420516393,0.04886067811434526,0.05318040489228538,0.10250290064487326,0.0,0.10995638389348206,0.0,0.0,0.05955532346752618,0.049689562318833064,0.0,0.0657396137490688,0.0,0.12600916915788096,0.0,0.08521201323565837,0.0,0.0,0.13679892825460405,0.04348147696679225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05787364500168026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05778854276143939,0.0,0.0,0.0728808017173249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056744005811401224,0.0,0.09664604273917388,0.0,0.0,0.08963443734473082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23040198933080944,0.07968148167229422,0.0,0.048006196485876576,0.09622444341185356,0.045653768927268,0.12164335232941904,0.0,0.27732030403540664,0.0981349210826764,0.05144244777675461,0.07257948826639701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05478816660713957,0.0,0.0,0.06367283191290116,0.0,0.057782481205892834,0.0,0.12093515695937285,0.08386086074054402,0.21002818454326191,0.0,0.0,0.053267161920602685,0.0,0.0,0.0570479983382643,0.0,0.03683982583472592,0.0,0.11569856829325323,0.06378681702678972,0.06036703745395584,0.0,0.1037970458326376,0.07538111342344485,0.04747031640955374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592937840179667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965653602337105,0.0,0.0,0.05836876539408172,0.0,0.046428288665750383,0.051714539877867054,0.0,0.0,0.1100426403961567,0.04332268347415294,0.14847836311729526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988855215266072,0.06110969042976415,0.05440528792273086,0.0,0.0460641569218691,0.0,0.1075387785705996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868282953370896,0.0568351739084051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043697351891671225,0.047518302504823265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528286009678272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510379988355114,0.0,0.0,0.051949067102581965,0.0,0.14764385034758049,0.05913462406993559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04695479050917372,0.059876496236212114,0.04485766464999832,0.06413298074676065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488815859581646,0.0,0.3433981729897032,0.06069772586917387,0.0,0.05240690845775367,0.0,0.039579114008806066,0.05521133781318164,0.055403624532001525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003975166537075
mentalhealth,LadyDarkrai,2020/02/09,"My treatment at a day hospital starts tomorrow.. .. and I'm heavily panicking, freaking out and just crying for the past days. 

So tomorrow my treatment program at this open psychiatric ward starts and I'm terrified. It's evening now and every minute to minute I'm panicking more and more. I don't know what to do to calm down, nothing seems to work. I have no distraction at all, none of my friends who know about that feels the need to talk to me to keep me from drowning in my thoughts and panic. I feel like it's asked too much to just have someone who keeps me busy this evening. I tried to distract myself by watching some episodes of one of my favorite series but not even that works. 

Does anyone here have experience with being at a day hospital (probably also one in Germany?) and can calm me down and tell me its not a horrific kind of prison thing? Because.. Thats what I imagine and I can't get my mind off it.

Anyways, thanks for reading I guess, I somehow will survive it, I'm sure.",2.8304138321995467,4.971401576530617,3.587278911564628,88.73787981859414,76.60204081632655,7.008616780045352,28.74603174603175,7.984000788550335,1.9090916099773247,783,35,158,13,18,248,118,196,0.11900000000000001,0.7829999999999999,0.098,0.1424,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,3,13,11,0,3,5,0,9,0,0,0,2,33,28,12,1,1,5,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,15,12,0,2,7,1,0,0,6,4,0,2,1,3,20,7,29,25,6,20,0,0,1,0,6,11,0,4,10,111,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244154294155238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705766213739693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313663370120544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333407757475308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818350165361712,0.29622871652874705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13398707984912891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033819715224353,0.0,0.1290012847262514,0.0,0.0,0.14977038614158703,0.0,0.0,0.15483344013471725,0.10938139584948353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829195333871377,0.0,0.07999334938032117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866728106732526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721813639708141,0.0,0.15943989341678774,0.16828985939332528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480152575348599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15459686140419254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255303617710233,0.11352869032986115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691261197593944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075018026595022,0.0,0.0,0.17964090789069778,0.0,0.0,0.14616026021423992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507784419904972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315084743510682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938505998459086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297291094990479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21674326235034552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14430381058122274,0.0,0.0,0.12306354717374095,0.13382437627834842,0.14096257737759102,0.0,0.0,0.10171909122028024,0.0,0.0,0.1215517721120077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039512416404881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229309536189971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnonCaptain002,2020/02/09,"Does anyone else struggle with ""feeling stupid"" all the time? Here's I would describe it: Picture that emptiness you feel in your stomach when you are hungry or right after a long toilet break. I constantly feel that emptiness in my head. I just feel stupid. I forget things right after studying them, sometimes I can't study at all without getting distracted, I suck at math and I struggle with putting together a cohesive sentence or even writing a single word properly. It's like being high all the time.


I try to fight this feeling by playing memory games, drinking a lot of coffee and reading lots of non-fiction books but nothing helps. I should also point out that I don't have any diagnosed mental or cognitive illnesses, In a recent IQ test I scored 109 (Even though the paper specified that the results might be a bit inaccurate since my scores to each section of the test were very imbalanced meaning that I could be a genius when it comes to logic but a dumbass when it comes to memory. Either way, they didn't specify nor did they tell me if the actual results are likely higher or lower)


This is very demotivating, It makes me abstain from studying thinking that I will immediately get distracted or forget everything once I finish reading. Is there a way to fight this feeling?",6.5692226890756285,7.8788964579831955,6.721334033613446,73.3679674369748,65.51260504201682,9.311344537815128,34.622899159663866,9.516144504307137,3.491217647058823,1039,47,168,20,16,333,148,238,0.141,0.7979999999999999,0.061,-0.9666,1,0,1,0,2,0,22.0,0,3,3,0,10,12,5,4,15,0,18,5,2,3,3,45,32,16,0,4,11,0,6,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,15,8,1,1,9,6,0,3,5,9,0,0,3,6,24,3,21,21,10,28,0,0,0,0,12,11,1,9,13,123,39,7,0.0,0.0,0.12025811474432099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985497816494706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380300264454248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616772521871567,0.1262672789713448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134539059646339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123094886823811,0.0,0.13317162889249232,0.0,0.09839191837739968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12507940366081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784246217221367,0.0,0.0,0.12072190988919372,0.0,0.0,0.10294577232666766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16278912277452467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075431941274702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738633477837641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12876883001390438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647311901779468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260081423315145,0.1302029537478651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204113220554918,0.0,0.0,0.109057765387637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20953742162493605,0.0,0.0,0.08225931502074461,0.0,0.0,0.13423740349304153,0.0,0.0,0.12419037841115005,0.13073126406044422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824586234341575,0.0,0.0,0.131239650563127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649548562197537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12388370007253058,0.0,0.0,0.2465336880206715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167820958576192,0.0,0.0,0.21048146325926795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194002075240828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188107790063632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576608122465831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771150660771492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08187085843998518,0.07896304782264456,0.12107628341839426,0.0,0.1437168842263272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366745403356786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20336107931736505,0.0,0.1956340250066481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879269184887818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754153930261667,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bretto2004,2020/02/09,"I've never thought of ""self awareness"" as a function of body, and other musings. I would assume that anybody with long term mental health issues, especially on this subreddit, has tried to understand their problem. I just wanted to post this powerful definition of my own problems, and how it affects me.

There word is called Anosognosia:

https://www.nami.org/learn-more/mental-health-conditions/related-conditions/anosognosia

I've never thought of self awareness as a function of the ""body/brain"", more a product of the ""mind/brain"". I always thought awareness and subsequently self control can largely be moulded, improved like any other skill, and most importantly taught. 

Learning about this definition butts up and confirms a different (shitty) one of my beliefs that some people cannot be helped, not because they don't want to, or through stubbornness or denial, but that even the first step of self recognizing serious physical or mental problems is, in fact, a physical ""body/brain"" flaw that cannot be reasoned with, fixed with introspection, or taught in theory or in practice. 

Up until I found this word I have been struggling to define this, and many other words in my life. Have you actually ever had to define a condition only to realize that you don't even have the words to describe it? 

What I mean is: recently I've been having extreme dizziness to the point of puking and physical eye twerking. The dizziness has been an off and on problem for many years and was already tied to blood pressure, or alcohol, or stress, or one of a hundred other things that ""I"" was the source of the problem, but this time it was bad enough to have to go to doctor about it. I suddenly realized that I have been asked many times by my GP and my optometrist about dizziness, the latter actually saying: ""any new dizziness"". I have never said I was dizzy because in the end I never really understood the definition of the word, you can look it up (turns out dizziness, vertigo, disorientation and whatever else you would lump ""dizziness"" into are completely different things) but the kind of dizziness I am experiencing is highly correlated to Meniers disease. I thought the dizziness I experience is actually mental - along the lines of sensory overload, when it turns out completely physical.

Anyways, I'm not sure I have a lesson here, so I'll just end this here.",12.550000000000004,10.405697333333336,11.094019607843137,58.27058823529416,54.83333333333334,13.619607843137254,46.05882352941178,12.000913495891488,5.61905,1904,90,290,41,17,599,200,408,0.106,0.87,0.024,-0.9862,3,0,1,0,0,0,78.0,0,4,2,5,15,14,1,3,24,0,37,10,4,4,7,76,56,28,0,9,15,0,0,1,0,2,6,2,0,4,27,18,1,2,15,0,0,2,10,11,0,3,18,5,28,3,54,33,6,37,1,0,2,1,15,16,1,12,19,218,55,4,0.0,0.0,0.22067419441370373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08055616926969393,0.0,0.0,0.0831815089404863,0.0,0.06272054311293875,0.0,0.0,0.10251926387588302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704682645008025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293749019621206,0.09189947109145588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837279768699322,0.0,0.2524403660493138,0.07696937645100463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158064819690617,0.0,0.08454284825820242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750795508727133,0.0,0.07715258775014792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296865544800095,0.0,0.13352508778532,0.07788563462207458,0.0,0.09957293000963764,0.0681837259376329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07373415814042437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411649719418343,0.0,0.08264809781615108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042839060433877585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16024660057805498,0.0,0.0,0.05052429151405068,0.07964100659563933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867505910294348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849459841795442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05324171798364373,0.03682588842255168,0.0,0.0,0.06670716725337651,0.06329854435308925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22926441469315026,0.0,0.08210875121676041,0.0,0.0,0.3038532218035651,0.0,0.07611030271374057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325446743085018,0.07280055221667568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215618137790523,0.05732837362145121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05225762147940927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125658421504184,0.0,0.07219129761832897,0.0,0.0,0.36063287995900173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04828908366779351,0.07750114894736547,0.0744266916627008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170174934239892,0.059943619373134666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145428169906144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634525631130999,0.0788014628581511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104288280062905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015560153321673,0.0,0.0,0.2393668820131849,0.08790704815144279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05117672116280223,0.16397926008945055,0.0,0.0784711672418052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891980709767824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709275186633667,0.0,0.0,0.048540967373953296
mentalhealth,PKGoFuckYourself,2020/02/09,Is it wrong? I'm 17. Im attracted to girls with younger faces/bodies (ie 15-16),-2.729999999999997,-1.132513999999999,0.5166666666666693,102.04500000000002,105.66666666666666,4.622222222222223,17.11111111111111,6.42735559955562,-0.2623555555555557,60,2,16,1,3,21,17,18,0.17300000000000001,0.67,0.156,-0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5857559418389504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.569617771867656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5765635876231617,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,halsteadw,2020/02/09,"New job stress ! So I’m nearly 6 weeks into training to work at a bank. I’ve done several shifts of working with actual customers. I occasionally get these waves of emotion when I get home of being totally overwhelmed. The idea that I’m dealing with other people’s money and worrying about my job performance. I have had bits of reassurance from coworkers especially when I asked if anyone has ever gotten fired. 

I just worry. Am I in over my head? Is this really the job for me?",3.2378502415458925,5.718952108695652,5.327101449275363,75.07683574879229,76.82608695652175,8.43671497584541,25.439613526570053,9.150863307647796,2.565242512077294,382,14,66,10,9,132,73,92,0.13699999999999998,0.8190000000000001,0.044000000000000004,-0.8541,3,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,6,3,0,2,3,0,7,1,1,0,2,9,13,5,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,9,1,15,9,2,10,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,1,5,46,13,5,0.0,0.0,0.17173171302908247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304975087203512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645181369175687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921252734712339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18142830611328195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18008928749798586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979545266238021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591845583089353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838852356038852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806069006422918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17652292423578853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986607150681876,0.0,0.0,0.523900874220984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699631926811716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200281341451265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273770022236765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19880802524240374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015852213849383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411610494066257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25623199457949425,0.3574337517541752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hookah-Bear,2020/02/09,"Nightmares, self harm, suicidal thoughts I've not had the easiest few months lately. My gf of 7 years is gone. My roommate left. All of my animals (dog, bunny, cat) are being moved away because of my work life. I just had a pretty scary medical issue and actually died for a few moments... I feel vulnerable and alone all the time now. I've struggled with this all my life and when things had finally gotten better and I felt like I had finally found a place in life, it all came crashing down. 

I use to have issues with suicidal thoughts, I'm ashamed to say I've attempted, and last night while I was cleaning up before bed I had a strong urge to cut myself. I just deal with physical pain much easier than emotional. I didn't then, but this morning I woke up from a recurring nightmare I've had off and on for the last 15 years of my life. It went away for 5 years and has recently been an everyday occurrence. 

It always consists of the same thing... it starts fine, just a group of people I've been close to in my life hanging out and having fun. Then the atmosphere changes, everything fades, and it becomes this hate circle. I can't talk, can't move. I watch as everyone tells me how much they hate me and want me to just disappear. And depending on the location in the dream... I either jump from the building, drink antifreeze, or stab myself multiple times in the chest... There was an exception a few nights ago when a new face showed up in the dream and they actually saved me in the end, but it's a one off occurrence and it's the only time it's ever ended that way...

But it's been dragging me down... I woke up this morning crying, my chest felt swollen, and I was having a hard time breathing. And well... I cut my wrist... Just to relieve it a little... And unfortunately it did help...

I just scheduled an appointment to see someone. I don't like this... I hate all of it... But I wanted to try and collect my thoughts before my appointment so I didn't go in and get completely lost in my thoughts... So I'm posting this.... As sort of a collection of thoughts in the moment to talk about later...",2.638516430099166,4.5857367002398135,3.916196772311881,87.05898502819366,76.4820143884892,7.577652472616501,25.89856763238059,8.441846121484758,1.7489095728822348,1632,61,337,32,37,534,206,417,0.152,0.774,0.075,-0.9871,1,1,1,0,0,1,81.0,0,0,2,5,16,19,5,2,28,0,25,14,5,3,6,61,53,33,3,2,14,0,4,2,1,0,8,1,2,1,21,24,1,0,9,4,0,9,6,10,1,1,30,7,42,9,53,22,12,72,0,1,2,0,11,26,0,3,37,224,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.16496605657660618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749252417341117,0.0,0.0,0.08754115746994952,0.0,0.0,0.07033056600370212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15882576987395214,0.0,0.0,0.05152491908165265,0.09334988756679136,0.14384704304090898,0.0,0.0,0.07475442527079318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667270065274627,0.0,0.0,0.0894149644810096,0.0,0.08862158777943448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284541658036034,0.0,0.08714031812462321,0.0,0.0,0.08772235151010997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828011376161921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950778894084846,0.14972598344254928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764566089423064,0.0,0.0807661054434145,0.0759645341239209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042737768890926564,0.0,0.16231219084101706,0.1851833652911087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267597520755733,0.0,0.0,0.044160192729073774,0.0,0.048036818845082284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571671546719004,0.2503492367555201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665451609245056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764417577545901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779634344028266,0.0953465189731024,0.0,0.0918353473211462,0.0,0.29850826977506545,0.08258811061898941,0.08471504478077467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226770363651472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514882808596018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746608437029017,0.17967082876163162,0.1242694251041322,0.0,0.0,0.08163360501456872,0.0,0.15863970598637606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05727550895204845,0.06428415260384779,0.08993927405830685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05859815483478949,0.0,0.08830937266779071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095042820175119,0.08599108331561457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345704757363516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721671193490261,0.0,0.0,0.06735451889166265,0.0,0.08817674900994764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161673467142511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598263750190843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836261948105124,0.0,0.1849106193625931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13587404461033314,0.0738775197448324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230770326061264,0.0,0.0,0.3355122472435947,0.19714601134983653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738610648049405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300141798213111,0.0,0.0,0.09970864491493242,0.0670910518308286,0.0,0.0,0.07599703990723307,0.0783544019915236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061534327249416085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16329165247963756
mentalhealth,Malerstuen,2020/02/09,"Learn to overcome any mental health challenge in the world's first life exprerience library! Hello everyone, hope you're having a fantastic sunday!

My name is Morten, and I work for The Human Aspect Foundation which is behind the Life Experience Library. I been in this sub for a while and thought I'd share our story, as I think a lot of you could have use for our FREE tool to overcome any challenge.

​

The Human Aspect was founded by Jimmy Westerheim a few years ago. Throughout his life he had  felt alone and with his challenges, from almost taking his own life at 13 when his mom got cancer, to losing his beloved grandma, to working in Doctors Without Borders in a warzone in Afghanistan, and then shattering his spine after a football accident, having to learn to walk again. On top of all this, his father's absence throughout his childhood made him do anything in his power just to get his attention. 

While in the middle of all these challenges, he felt the need for someone who could just say ""I know how you feel, I've been there myself. Here's what you have to do"". The feeling of not being the only one in the world feeling the way he does. Not bein alone. 

​

That's why he started The Human Aspect. In The Life Experience Library on our website, you can watch in-depth videos where real, ordinary people answer the three main questions:

1. What has been your life's thoughest challenge?
2. How did you overcome it?
3. What did you learn?

We have stories from over 85 countries, in categories ranging from anxiety and depression, to war and conflict, to family and love, to physical/mental illness, and loss and grief. All of our people share their toughest challenges, but also how they got out of them so that you can learn and make the first step towards a better life.

If you're going through something in life, or know someone who does, check out our library with more than 300 stories, with hundreds more on the way on:

[www.thehumanaspect.com](https://www.thehumanaspect.com)

I'd love to hear your thoughts on our videos and how they have helped you or someone you know, and what you think we could improve! Thank you for taking your time to read this, and I hope you all stay strong through the hardest parts in life, it will get better. I promise!",7.453675417661095,8.030141642004779,6.3793355608591895,79.17729928400954,63.36754176610978,8.326911694510741,33.943770883054896,7.839951260653429,2.467128801909308,1824,72,317,17,25,548,213,419,0.055,0.8109999999999999,0.134,0.9872,1,2,1,0,0,0,73.0,8,15,4,17,13,23,1,0,23,0,25,16,1,7,4,71,56,28,2,7,9,2,5,0,0,1,13,3,0,3,15,20,0,1,20,3,2,3,3,5,0,4,15,9,46,19,60,36,11,47,0,4,1,2,59,27,0,8,14,219,61,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205539917204999,0.0,0.08139648626386088,0.1683761813639555,0.0,0.0650046236204658,0.0,0.1761473411386034,0.19754350004935545,0.1105549409444612,0.0,0.062183795936681135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668916977042129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14378225089694585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19470148531129144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001176987202061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08319997100990204,0.1422683753626912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776725417576807,0.0,0.15902719529225584,0.07662948802238073,0.0,0.12330238485262765,0.0,0.1560951880948656,0.0,0.0,0.13828416812376587,0.0,0.08912623079598693,0.0,0.0,0.08493747209785482,0.0,0.04619687673642837,0.0,0.13002415726618285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640353429042283,0.09161556622758338,0.0,0.05448449250824768,0.0,0.0,0.1614712713086825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13401847166642936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5167342495875312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093857590063888,0.0,0.06910670424202299,0.1467281162264035,0.07691506115340209,0.054259235512264144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191747024477958,0.0,0.0,0.09520153048790343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06027276043507423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055081699635588136,0.06182189298427554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802514008908781,0.0,0.1127073690959886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09105925767253006,0.0,0.08130829582429204,0.09252160363943816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464212723783648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066208510528809,0.06257816394957155,0.0,0.0,0.05753486052557194,0.08664037881872791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223436068123762,0.0,0.0,0.07483750258991073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416995588875412,0.0,0.1290644826374566,0.04739869439928203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020526315410344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904256052181995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733482412092613,0.0,0.0,0.07835709113963099,0.0,0.11835478698820365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19754350004935545,0.05234571122078497
mentalhealth,fuchsiabunny,2020/02/09,"h e l l o * trigger warning *

why am I everyone’s second option?

that is probably everyone except my dad, but his depression and borderline alcoholism brings me down even more than I already am

I feel claustrophobic 

I feel so claustrophobic but I need to stay at home until I can save a little

I want to live 

I want to be here 

I want to experience things 

I want to be healthy and happy 

But I would be lying if I said there wasn’t a dark voice in my head telling me things 

The voice that tells me that the pain, frustration, boredom, jealousy, anger, worry, loneliness, self-hatred etc would all go if I did too

It runs through the scenarios in my head of which would be the best way to do it

I would never do it — like I said, I don’t want to

Then if I don’t want to, why is this voice here

What’s brought me down today?

- my dad acting depressed
- there been sick in the bathroom no doubt from my dad’s overdrinking
- been ignored by someone from tinder
- been unfollowed by someone on instagram after I posted something 
- feeling fat 
- feeling disgusted from what I’ve ate
- my room been too crowded 
- worried about work
- wanting my own space again
- my upcoming spear test I’m worried about 

I’ve deleted my social media for a bit 

I just want to be completely alone for a week 

That’s how I feel

I’m just so fed up

It’s like my moods are getting worse 

I’m sorry for the long post.",1.4842326139088726,3.827760133093527,3.0498992805755383,89.7012757793765,82.56115107913669,6.2965947242206255,24.01486810551559,7.554174236665415,1.2170485371702635,1079,41,223,18,30,354,153,278,0.261,0.644,0.095,-0.9957,1,1,3,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,2,15,14,3,1,10,0,25,8,3,2,2,37,50,13,0,16,9,3,5,2,0,4,4,5,2,0,14,2,4,1,5,0,0,5,5,8,0,1,11,10,35,5,33,30,6,28,0,2,0,0,10,11,0,5,10,147,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052546163898249,0.0,0.102004734395742,0.10868488277969156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335796012178107,0.0,0.10752430366686663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326367373281843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696565852134255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984108969543632,0.06505094920717744,0.0,0.0,0.18822061238479848,0.0,0.09634098294712196,0.0,0.0,0.2489945809707879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051456353335746496,0.0,0.05597347680936274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484320037592444,0.0,0.0,0.2021559254347764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879233568161497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962333436227186,0.09871169050001016,0.08696744912660381,0.08715952314216484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07302822607894191,0.07596066418542573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479906854341857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18865016562696754,0.0,0.10618762615657223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873708789763124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102745338565203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039696824204902,0.1668985471423938,0.07582151989599306,0.0,0.11025019172158046,0.0,0.10497599788473068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172167172497683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086321648907945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933559032567036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4647301514147044,0.07817585602159592,0.07900180579107494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17774171625315574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170104769807284,0.3000605899214847,0.10036854095145507,0.2798545814184493,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mikemishere,2020/02/09,"How can I achieve genuine self-acceptance?  **TL;DR: I am a young male who sufferers from physical problems and although I know, pragmatically, what there is to do to live and try to make the most out of my situation I don't know how to achieve genuine emotional self-acceptance and not be affected by my limits.**

I was about 15 years old when I first started experiencing symptoms of what would become one of the major sources of shame, hopelessness, self-resentment and the whole plethora of negative self-conscious emotions.

I am talking about the state of my physical health, more precisely, the state of my joints and tendon's health. I have lived a moderately active lifestyle until I started experiencing stinging pains in my knee ankles, back and shoulders. Visits to the doctor didn't end up in concluding more than I genetically have a predisposition to developing tendinitis and causing injury to my ligaments from stress damage because they are more sensitive and weaker than regular. Today even regular walking and preparing food are painful and I don't even remember the last time I thought I could run without the fear of injuring myself.

Living an active lifestyle, working towards achieving and maintaining an athletic body, practicing sports and being and feeling healthy and young (at least as long as my birth certificate would prove that I am young) were aspects of life that I deemed to be undivorcable from a happy or at least satisfactory life.

I must admit that in the almost full-decade that succeeded this finding I did not do everything I think that could have been done to at least be the healthiest I can be under my circumstances but I never did any excesses and lived an above-average healthy lifestyle for someone my age.

I have decided on writing this because with every year that passes now I feel more inner-torn and depressed over it. The idea of self-acceptance never truly made full sense to me and would most often anger me greatly and fill me with resentment. It is not that I do not ""get it"" from a purely pragmatic, problem-solving point of view. Indeed, when you accept your limits and make the most out of what you have you will most certainly have a better quality of life than wallowing in self-pity but I don't know how to emotionally self-accept the situation and even the thought itself angers me.

I feel left out and distanced from my generation. I don't have friends and never been in a romantic relationship and up until now, I obscured to myself how much the avoidance of dealing with this issue counted in my isolation and low self-esteem. Well, but I guess I could try finding and developing relationships with people with similar issues so we can feel like the senior's club playing bridge and looking on the window from a distance the young, the proud and the healthy relishing their years of most freedom and mirth.

I believe there's a good chance a good part of you were already alienated by my self-defeating attitude. This is how I feel, that I won't see a day and have access to the experience of genuinely feeling young and healthy and enjoy being in my body.

Do you know of any ways out?

Thank you.

**TL;DR: I am a young male who sufferers from physical problems and although I know, pragmatically, what there is to do to live and try to make the most out of my situation I don't know how to achieve genuine emotional self-acceptance and not be affected by my limits.**",8.568674359696033,8.533646312599682,8.370479876160992,67.89615325077402,61.15311004784689,11.77838446383338,39.17482878318793,11.267331181571699,4.6331174969509314,2766,130,459,69,34,891,273,627,0.10400000000000001,0.758,0.138,0.9594,0,2,0,0,0,1,68.0,1,7,2,13,22,32,3,4,37,0,56,16,5,14,8,122,83,53,0,9,10,0,6,1,1,6,10,0,1,2,22,45,1,4,24,3,0,5,17,17,1,2,12,11,66,15,84,55,18,66,0,6,3,0,22,26,0,11,33,353,88,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057152469627147574,0.0,0.06298379371931853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762605235780001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438872299841244,0.0,0.06958490419162734,0.0630349653954858,0.0,0.0643040944849866,0.0,0.0504782890791632,0.0,0.1267951421146906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05863185125588104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13670947280871346,0.0,0.0,0.036808718733969764,0.05884192344213715,0.049158701251334695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058418784819636485,0.0,0.05840764484175352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568072281587496,0.05055159910264141,0.0,0.0,0.11309269867132732,0.0,0.048088234605862784,0.0,0.05129542096512396,0.05583040107756128,0.0,0.0642253569610613,0.1731533172672951,0.04077446388451604,0.0,0.0,0.1043312174568029,0.04854805214188875,0.06901543923421502,0.0,0.04409608180421678,0.0,0.029819384822970155,0.0,0.0,0.09574377438337273,0.0,0.0629255008483651,0.06287465895793505,0.0,0.0,0.06075750680741676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213363277919305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443084233892182,0.0,0.11914315468694635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882018987051305,0.04652382539918922,0.0,0.0,0.062012264731748985,0.0,0.12094149620956647,0.02788401159680952,0.0,0.2519918012511697,0.050509668740113416,0.047928710491661336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054005841016158664,0.11429422025249344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04195676671571344,0.0,0.13205951043445172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059890717912893875,0.0,0.03867556586201582,0.0,0.12146386408669466,0.0,0.0,0.061806772949124775,0.0,0.039568688924316364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0539544191793211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16383949179853918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225545984072187,0.06465496382388893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04548146632236466,0.0,0.5954177843601159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19246441616962587,0.0,0.0,0.04835954824820726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807961011493901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653793358815383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05932288407911791,0.0,0.04587480458414565,0.0,0.05254708513923232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0365714204216002,0.0,0.0906225104111868,0.033280950644968575,0.0,0.0541005225641148,0.0,0.0,0.11625074214228992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04530355890870397,0.0,0.0,0.05131737065333082,0.0,0.0,0.06372231250656457,0.0,0.05501836107411569,0.0,0.04155135362135461,0.0,0.0,0.12163354352965787,0.0,0.0,0.11026348217142737
mentalhealth,throwaway560123,2020/02/09,"Should I drop one of my core classes? Sorry for the long post but I gotta get this off of my chest. 

I am currently a sophomore computer science student from the US that is taking this class called Computer Organization and Architecture which is known for being a particularly difficult course at my university. This rather difficult class is also paired up with a professor that is notorious for assigning a very heavy workload onto students. For example, in this class, every Monday we have a programming project due and a circuits assignment due on top of all of the lectures and materials we have to go through online because it is an online class. 

Because of the workload from this class, I find myself being so overwhelmed by the work in this class that it paralyzes me and is starting to affect my life in other ways, most notably would be my girlfriend breaking up with me because I am constantly so stressed about this class and I never had time for her because of it. On top of that, this class is affecting me academically where I am putting so much time into this Computer Organization and Architecture class that I have been really been slacking off in my other classes, mainly in the forms of not studying for exams, skipping homework, etc. I have no history of mental health issues in the past but I feel like this is causing me so much anxiety and burnout that it is affecting my daily life where I dread even waking up most days. Some days I would just break down crying thinking about all of the work I have to do. It's hard for me to count but I have had several mental breakdowns in the past month or so because of the insurmountable workload that this professor is putting on me.

I feel like I am losing my mind more and more in that class as I am falling behind on materials and I can barely ask for help because my university has set up a terrible culture in the computer science department that we cannot ask for help with getting ridiculed for  asking for help. I know I can take this class again with a different professor that is not as heavy on the workload in the fall and is a better fit for how I learn. Do I have a valid reason to drop the class?",9.317273073989325,7.6247556014492766,9.097266717518435,68.64911899313503,60.61835748792271,12.290668700737353,40.38850750063565,11.10113133989139,4.4375961352657,1745,77,313,37,19,568,184,414,0.113,0.8190000000000001,0.068,-0.9609,2,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,4,0,0,7,15,11,1,3,25,0,40,5,2,6,3,49,54,23,0,4,8,0,3,2,1,4,3,0,1,0,30,18,0,0,8,0,0,6,5,8,0,1,4,3,43,3,66,43,12,59,0,2,0,0,14,30,0,4,18,248,73,35,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683568894393562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306751828666488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.304538016312644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3971558378034757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603494427906537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108778132835628,0.0,0.0,0.11154709620816504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734221983157295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927594086319848,0.1400571737705645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344861060397947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110140165430308,0.07171961922241715,0.0,0.09148786567647296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980806124009564,0.15514683395934048,0.0,0.0,0.09924506988854162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346275843140835,0.0,0.06171157365493695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727117190112924,0.0,0.0,0.11542118097792732,0.0,0.0,0.21834747346609512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333492507688847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059675684949810126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533941299172238,0.1060986633590873,0.0,0.0,0.09609464408359172,0.0,0.12147926485995665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188570464397009,0.0,0.10964027932097688,0.0,0.08667181414019841,0.0,0.15964549619953486,0.0,0.08374773892860489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.073580263520722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20731406329936453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399477801562357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21831659623529706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956257474633687,0.11164385523790243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267057150197645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155244259829807,0.07685729066291122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438418561570458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632853838882165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957712684926187,0.0,0.0,0.12663401628892393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061484205704593,0.0,0.0,0.08959431026299282,0.0,0.08619002020091575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581028993866478,0.0,0.0,0.1542718765951963,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maththrowaway44t32,2020/02/09,"Delusions of grandeur (maybe?) and how to overcome them? I'm going to die one day; that's just part of being human. One of my biggest fears about this though is being forgotten, that my life will end up meaning nothing to this world, that I'll come and go and none of it will matter.

I'm a PhD student studying one of the Sciences and, although I have zero expectations that I'll be a big-name Scientist like Tesla or Hawking or Lavoisier or whoever, I see the possibility of my name being attached to a paper (one out of fifty million out there) as being able to leave my mark. By extension though, living with this mindset for the rest of my life will be unhealthy. My work hasn't gone anywhere near as well as I would've hoped and maybe having it come crashing down as it has, has contributed to having this mindset. Seeing those in Science with greater successes than mine, with higher positions that I know I'll never get, has played a part as well. I understand that my #1 aim in my work should be to improve human welfare but this narcissism has oozed in over the past six months since I've realised I'm a goner.

How can I get over this? I'm in my late-20s and I can't live with this mindset for the next 50 years.",6.582279319041611,5.877153274590168,6.67344262295082,80.64734552332915,65.4344262295082,9.310970996216898,33.93316519546028,8.384062270229773,2.5157973518285,965,37,193,11,13,309,133,244,0.046,0.883,0.071,0.5889,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,3,9,7,0,1,10,0,22,2,0,2,1,30,39,20,1,3,5,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,2,17,14,0,0,3,1,0,5,4,1,2,7,1,2,18,6,40,27,5,25,0,0,2,0,4,13,0,4,8,139,35,6,0.13351094786418385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300157194355112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610351628726012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13856328522277686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825107165885587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15023693460018006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13950791959575398,0.0,0.1517546968644332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326064961575704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337412533322561,0.0,0.15060616451835845,0.14136881632913442,0.0,0.0,0.1886054617285676,0.0652267052279737,0.0,0.2357852259960593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682593844413029,0.1454325622996487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656716481644987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297187368171573,0.0,0.14199040770223956,0.0,0.0,0.1281073552858606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618818942530397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891586919800405,0.12745130681500658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051353332832884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127818794541264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044163573731967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623476568089059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898960524308235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400847523003089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19439512030568096,0.0,0.0,0.09484234674648563,0.0,0.0,0.08597667309616414
mentalhealth,FicklePsychologist4,2020/02/09,"(TW: ED, SH, SI)Trying to Clean a Room That Holds Awful Memories This room has been my bedroom since I was 3(20f). In this room, I built towns with my blocks, drew countless pictures, and daydreamed about being a princess. I’ve also spent countless hours in there, hacking up my body with razors or making myself vomit. I attempted in that room. I can’t move my bed because of the awful blood strain on the carpet. 

Two years ago, I had to come back home from college because I was so messed up (bipolar kicked in right on time at 17, making my whole case a lot more complicated). I have yet to fully unpack. In my mind, I’ve accepted that failure if I do.

I’ve come a long ass way from that point. Its not perfect, as I’m still fighting hard with this eating disorder, but my life in general is back on track. I feel strong knowing that my drive to live a better life is what got me here today. The one thing that’s still in disarray is my room.

It’s all clothes. Clothes fucking everywhere. Most of which are ugly, shapeless things I use to hide my body in. Some of them are too big from when I was fat, some of them are too small from when I was thinner. When I’m sorting through all that bullshit, I feel like that fucked up kid again. All those intrusive thoughts that I’ve been so good at controlling come rushing back. I feel so out of control.

I decided a long time ago that I’m not going to be a victim to this shit. This is an obstacle I need to overcome and I’m tired of letting it control me. I know it’s a strange question but does anyone have any tips for how to keep your mind separate from a space with upsetting memories?",3.424818181818182,4.746612451515151,4.075575757575758,89.35336363636365,72.96969696969697,7.098181818181819,27.44242424242424,7.554174236665415,1.3833733333333336,1279,47,270,15,25,406,185,330,0.171,0.7709999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9867,0,0,0,0,2,0,43.0,0,1,2,7,20,14,5,2,13,2,22,14,6,7,4,48,45,15,0,2,6,0,4,1,0,0,6,0,10,1,24,10,2,6,9,0,1,7,3,8,0,2,10,4,33,6,45,32,9,55,0,0,0,3,6,28,4,8,20,175,57,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927875740534832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696144795566202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394872247330582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603538056246299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508491279648634,0.0,0.1325770050673245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617402603025102,0.0,0.2415771120753243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28101646053690593,0.0,0.0,0.36589234373654056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462848364480288,0.0,0.0951614149177548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112708658359146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16495063467754534,0.0776857619886665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010616323063381,0.0,0.0,0.061800946890864586,0.0912081651117405,0.08697142107228581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741204400793836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907773178854396,0.0,0.10708959344379287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665545267078028,0.0,0.0,0.11952421945617135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119671442702188,0.15361628159722576,0.053126159900818815,0.0,0.09602174120811778,0.1924676245889732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244910176570834,0.0,0.0,0.14517310992100646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21959812975448828,0.0,0.0,0.11557621438198094,0.0,0.08063128786532361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368682548085004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027969412049875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181664097010272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286561830221338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162275476440092,0.08995303349114299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368402162117738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14448755291285598,0.0,0.0,0.08632950753881467,0.1268174128731293,0.1249836651677,0.1030753054480826,0.0,0.0,0.07382911283763298,0.0,0.10622575595647504,0.0,0.0,0.0939187245146513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631484412864601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214072713935122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07002669331040097
mentalhealth,coco_moonbabe,2020/02/09,"How to talk to Mom with cancer and depression about getting help? I'm asking for advice today because my mom's (64F)situation sort of breaks my heart. As she deals with her 4th cancer, always asks for help from me (26F), I worry about how she handles life concerned with her irrational behaviors. I just want her to live her best life. 


• She has mentioned suicide to me. One time is too many times.


• She is a hoarder. In complete denial of it. Has recently moved, and has not paid her old house mortgage for 4 (+) months. Unpaid house still has rooms full of molding trash, but wants to sell it. Doesnt want us throw things away.


• Diagnosed with depression, but doesnt go to therapy


• Retired 5 years early from a cozy university job (10+ years) with tenure to run off with her childhood bf. But ended up breaking up with him, and now struggles to make money b/c she cant make too much from her pension and age


• Unaware of her extreme responses to people and her screaming fits, and is constantly putting people down. People avoid her now.


Everything above seems self explanatory on why I want to help her seek higher ground. I've mentioned to her getting help on managing her stress, and she gets offended.

How can present to her to seek help in a graceful manner? 


TL;DR
Mom has many challenges in her life. Her responses are a danger to her own happiness. I want to find a way to help her heal internally. How can I help?",3.1950808969628137,5.595964586715874,3.889022140221403,85.7448758160659,76.56457564575645,6.826057337496453,25.921231904626737,7.882392219407189,1.6170742548963952,1117,42,211,18,26,354,154,271,0.139,0.73,0.131,-0.6474,2,1,0,0,0,1,41.0,1,0,0,2,12,12,2,3,5,0,14,8,1,6,0,34,30,15,1,5,5,3,0,0,1,0,7,1,1,1,3,14,0,1,2,0,3,5,4,8,0,1,1,1,35,4,46,29,4,39,0,2,0,0,44,14,0,2,17,129,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277767269784136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900058357285944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17751868024821285,0.0,0.08920252757378933,0.0,0.0,0.0578766659688286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996373278018281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995464354909383,0.10260017577170864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788256196043524,0.1635493654744312,0.09636563664306944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409174516922734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532908047852547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677662336416858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488121535707447,0.0,0.05395856933023219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106910306028123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250848442313248,0.44547030706025703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21910406392161152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094216756801706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011841694461556,0.0,0.0,0.08383683488438133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675102422607,0.19251557947168085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33358997919820665,0.07578298227186364,0.10090989686078336,0.06979438430065682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962721413633767,0.0,0.06433616119918874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19746556972102847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544442392419997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937452353396106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643298104395121,0.09904675911433354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672045280452606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758219881222012,0.0,0.10875743893127143,0.0992555428128093,0.0,0.10385276038937882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763119751947967,0.0,0.0,0.1085761471525144,0.0,0.0630762312992682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110724616839276,0.0,0.08999532038039644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142053198983464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800006307045804,0.0753617175052085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567172584244506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641971559549163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228098034254295
mentalhealth,newprofilewhodis1352,2020/02/09,"How can I push a person nicely to do things to get out of their misery? Hear me out 

I have a friend who hasn’t worked in a few years. She’s 21 and last work experience she had a horrible boss who left my friend with trauma from working.

she also lives in a hyper-religious cult family (as a trans person—she’s not out and can’t be yet) with abusive parents and had horrible anxiety/depression.

She’s also an Internet friend and won’t let me help her with $.

The only way to get out is to get a job.

I have autism, bipolar and anxiety, so I get it, i really do. I got fired from a job for anxiety attacks. I really do get it. But I’ve pushed myself to work, move out, and get away from my own narcissist/dysfunctional family.

It hurts to see her do nothing to help herself and it hurts her even more. 

I’m very worried and don’t know what to do.",1.3986662011173188,3.070178821229049,3.8692143854748617,87.2484025837989,79.22346368715084,7.826955307262571,21.802025139664806,8.660442795831766,1.326611452513967,655,19,146,15,16,229,99,179,0.196,0.7090000000000001,0.095,-0.9579,3,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,4,8,8,1,0,10,0,17,1,0,2,0,21,28,14,0,0,2,1,1,0,3,1,1,1,0,1,8,16,0,0,1,0,0,3,5,4,0,0,3,3,21,4,25,22,3,16,0,2,1,0,19,9,0,0,3,100,29,7,0.0,0.14536283673708975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962238842261672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18770889353755613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957302548433204,0.11526752645728565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10566926366689416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810329395102197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001044010358385,0.2313148657517964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843606752967383,0.0,0.38459019750740014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981231940168166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827602760779786,0.0,0.16446766636910273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626757801239985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434938292163677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742501174988691,0.10000545677080913,0.0,0.0,0.13329868742906448,0.12545473730602402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833397714136099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303957917176786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772051654678807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933082240612322,0.0,0.0,0.13622827331368662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142493490113817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719157387364258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977648500558064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150712045799277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122879070907967,0.0,0.0973824285327826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35726744846922226,0.1245935784634983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790057553313012
mentalhealth,pizzainmyanus,2020/02/09,"Grief support groups?? Any help appreciated. TW: suicide

Hi all! I hope this is the right place to post this.

One of my close friends lost a partner to suicide a few months ago. She is, of course, reeling. We are college students with very little money. I am trying to see if I can find something near her to help her process her grief that is accessible, helpful and affordable. 

Does anyone have any suggestions or experience with this? Any and all support and recommendations on how you or someone you know processed grief is appreciated.

Thanks so much.",3.5077666666666687,6.578865310000001,3.9440000000000026,81.62866666666667,80.9,6.133333333333334,29.333333333333336,7.492282038375204,2.0786333333333333,441,21,77,7,12,138,72,100,0.161,0.608,0.231,0.7925,1,0,1,0,0,2,16.0,1,2,0,1,2,9,0,0,3,0,8,0,0,1,2,16,15,8,5,2,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,0,1,1,1,11,5,10,14,4,9,0,4,1,0,15,6,0,4,2,49,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121044128704725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.348004346629723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927473546701725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492772510247117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686169706288315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559086417567902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317910475594372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.343012081681813,0.0,0.0,0.16942618089913614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374727628163236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17096774075699653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18621014574675626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615673641392068,0.0,0.1253972237765132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155906178362916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822163668508392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633701765581278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567589423555452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359315804469165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14453337490232335,0.13132217563813545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37317752609597793,0.3871483281318989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704876971704373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581382033380055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074781989601282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alienstallion,2020/02/09,"All my life I have been in my own way When a woman I like, likes me too and does the first step to approach me, I scare her and act crazy or I just run away.

When they offer me a promotion and salary increase I just don't show up at work anymore so they fire me.

When I receive a big amount of money I lose everything due to gambling.

I don't know if I want to hurt myself or if I just want to be as free as possible.",1.318328267477206,2.0124019574468117,3.3301215805471145,95.10500000000002,77.29787234042553,6.648024316109423,21.939209726443767,6.868970318607317,0.2390869300911853,320,8,82,3,7,109,63,94,0.17600000000000002,0.71,0.114,-0.6023,1,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,2,4,8,6,0,1,4,0,5,1,0,0,1,14,8,13,0,4,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,6,2,3,0,1,1,1,20,4,11,6,4,17,0,2,0,0,6,5,0,4,7,58,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735723506900278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591732569112677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414010827281481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479191598979001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346406769890795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295306664152598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15160176009306706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19484334451254354,0.2695359780501458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30860928338016325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31098314926104553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761772773904928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3254108481932222,0.2189595104925127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008244885918914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fs0c13ty91,2020/02/09,"How to forgive myself for needing a second psychotherapy Hello friend.

Throwaway account for obvious reasons.

My mental health problem is related to anxiety, most specifically to social anxiety (and now also depression). Because of childhood trauma, most of all, I fear to disappoint people, to not fulfill their expectations, which is also why I have become a very performance-oriented person. In 2013 I did psychotherapy for 2.5 years, which has helped me a lot. 

However, back than I was a student. My situation has changed, I am now employed and have moved to a different city. Somewhere during this process, I messed up. Old behaviour patterns have manifested themselves again slowly over time. I've denied them to the point where depression started to kick in again. Which in some way is a good thing, because now I have no other choice but to deal with my anxiety issues.

Now here's my tricky problem: Falling back into old behaviour patterns some years after therapy, for me means that I have failed and I have disappointed my old therapist. She was a very good person, that really helped me. And what do I do? I'm an ungrateful piece of shit, that let's her down and lets her waste her time on me. In fact, if we would hypothesize a scenario, where I would have to confront her again, I would rahter kill myself, than admit to her, that I have failed.

I'm really beating myself up over this for months now. I'm thinking: Well, in therapy you learned what your problem is, you learned what causes it, you learned the techniques how to deal with it, THAN WHY DON'T YOU SIMPLY DO IT?

I have not yet come up with a solution on how I can forgive myself for getting sloppy and let anxiety win. Maybe you can offer me ideas and perspectives on how I can forgive myself for what I've done?",5.197699300699302,7.1870717303030345,5.665454545454548,77.05048951048953,69.57575757575758,8.834498834498833,31.480186480186482,9.367010060515213,3.0937599067599075,1421,62,243,31,26,456,166,330,0.204,0.7190000000000001,0.076,-0.9919,3,0,0,0,0,1,48.0,1,6,2,4,21,23,3,1,12,0,33,2,1,6,3,50,43,15,1,9,4,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,18,13,0,0,11,0,1,3,4,15,1,1,4,0,46,8,44,33,7,44,0,6,0,0,29,18,1,7,22,194,64,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15394956226895645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945380691862108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802771555133992,0.0,0.11735184025138425,0.10630566033361936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888000453769344,0.10182462015350413,0.08291482817398538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19846856383821,0.16580791834750494,0.0,0.0,0.10056558630968096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850189041079067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831320266572217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436607706392531,0.0,0.05028906376737957,0.0,0.0,0.16146760920386585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023141550681441,0.0,0.0,0.1290348794427934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865974459916047,0.0,0.100464810710703,0.0,0.0,0.1064914705976897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952805969924903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183223188881099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09670069863745047,0.10484949414388704,0.0,0.0,0.09700201296445653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682951566466348,0.1023034231322878,0.0,0.07137157765805448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030090811808707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673083071028793,0.16809163485263742,0.0,0.0,0.09099172376455976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27630800231415104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332634269089912,0.09896577578252837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880397945993337,0.0,0.10819422058465897,0.0,0.0981194587388018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812951217772001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22015108269393185,0.11175902726683916,0.06394728942297521,0.061676070937210975,0.0,0.0,0.11225368056114923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15884027655589972,0.0,0.07640243339607981,0.0,0.0,0.08654445893101279,0.0,0.17370963784503018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20512955123418394,0.0,0.0,0.12396963293177055
mentalhealth,throwawaydfw9102,2020/02/09,"Who am I... really? ...

I’m the guy who is real. I’m not the jerk who leaves you for no reason. I’m the guy who is nice. I’m the guy who loves to fill the void in people’s lives. I do it with a commitment. I enjoy seeing other people benefit in an emotionally positive way because of me. I love doing selfless acts for people I love and care about. I love people special, I suppose. So I either decide to be special in your life. Or I’m just another guy in your life. So you either see me for who I really am as a consequence of me emotionally bonding with you, or you see me as just another guy in your circle. I do huge acts in the name of love and care. I don’t make much of it. I enjoy it and I do it only for that. To see the smile on your face. The comfort on your face. The feeling of safety and calmness in you because of me. I just enjoy that kind of an impact I have on someone. No, I don’t do this for everyone. No, I don’t do this as charity like I have lots of love to shower. I do it out of choice. And a dedicated and will full choice. To sum up, the primary thing about me, is to fill up your void and know that I have an impact on you. Not with jokes. I’m not humorous. Not with money. I’m not rich. But with selfless acts of love.

Secondarily, I love to think. I love to analyse. Solve problems. Fix things. In a way, I suppose this is connected to the primary thing about me. But I decided to go deep only in the human space and nothing else. I guess. I observe. I think. I analyse. And I appreciate. I don’t act. I just appreciate and smile. Sometimes, I share my appreciation out loud. But almost always, it’s within me. This has clearly shown in my profession, which is one of the applications of the above process and is probably the only thing apart from humans, where I share my views and put effort into making it better. But without the human connection. It’s with an object. With everything else: football, food, photography, musical instruments, art, dance, cinema, acting, and everything along these lines; it ends with my appreciation in my mind. 

I’m alone. What about you?",0.4789074040713359,2.8210717704918054,3.2537177985948484,86.36071000720592,87.7353629976581,6.5633039092055485,20.62371644748694,7.815909333733263,1.1207795352188799,1614,53,336,35,52,566,170,427,0.039,0.701,0.26,0.9986,1,1,0,0,0,0,78.0,0,13,0,2,11,30,1,0,24,0,25,14,2,3,2,61,56,24,0,1,18,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,1,8,30,25,1,0,7,4,2,10,13,2,0,1,0,7,59,28,66,54,5,40,0,0,5,9,39,27,0,5,2,244,89,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756793636922306,0.07827489153060248,0.0,0.0,0.06288604793825597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15849797090127282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214197227455864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668416399624655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541114043385685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626962996733446,0.1700277148600064,0.06693871461147521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722169814250243,0.13584731663535055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038213959249346015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913879060740402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042952102682269726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325649291001624,0.3741651420692811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870172728123795,0.04153509618683928,0.0,0.0,0.08002504094439042,0.0,0.0,0.10676442081841044,0.0369230633181764,0.0,0.06673580091555302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425279080167756,0.6139000516680563,0.0,0.10089635576365624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631113997901738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05555772879708238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251808862967604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05121287380876377,0.17243894932267165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20958206841901109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148469743620859,0.07231690113517096,0.0,0.07597567444297318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602307559713725,0.0968330145024164,0.07770565633014308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409000663328263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640360751467794,0.0,0.07474750180948679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20083977742225328,0.09685327142934466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997887522871395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728534494597005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kkb090,2020/02/09,Is there anyone here who suffers with AIWS or hallucinations that I could talk to? Thanks,4.059374999999998,7.327606187500002,4.492500000000003,77.1025,80.875,5.7,20.5,7.1686216300943375,0.8407249999999995,73,2,12,1,2,23,16,16,0.163,0.684,0.153,-0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4319779201130783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4932605119691981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.496561704118144,0.0,0.5687843333548739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yburg5,2020/02/09,"Is tracking my time hour by hour healthy? I'll keep this short. Basically after watching a video by CGP grey and how he speaks about tracking his hours in terms of when he's being productive and when he is isn't I thought I would give that a go. After doing it for about 3 weeks my girlfriend saw what it was I was doing and started saying that I was being OCD and it isn't healthy to be criticising my every actions. 

Ever since I have felt bad and anxious for continuing to do so and have now stopped. Was I being OCD? Sorry, my knowledge of mental health isn't that great and I hope I haven't offended anyone who does suffer from OCD. Thank you.",3.474772727272729,4.808974507575762,4.4867878787878785,86.40518181818184,72.86363636363636,6.795151515151516,26.078787878787878,7.1686216300943375,1.13423696969697,513,17,105,5,10,167,81,132,0.138,0.76,0.102,-0.7017,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,8,6,1,0,2,0,20,1,0,1,1,16,29,11,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,9,7,0,2,3,1,0,2,4,3,0,0,7,6,14,3,14,17,1,19,0,1,3,0,10,2,0,1,15,72,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21533808948234534,0.0,0.13328082823495094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15915363833790014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668064538169694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17242009531326444,0.1605994165053002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830180791593234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18285306575812532,0.10832958717885367,0.0,0.0,0.21015116904123446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20261238121958566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893214151891021,0.5631453253978643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16942532134501367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19209276386763555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158286561212134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767679095256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21337530624130366,0.1349166465232776,0.0,0.0,0.1593607480018618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17549055983407175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15132518810024814,0.11114779525867673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528980062624871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540578950645255,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,magneticjuice,2020/02/09,"My Parents gave me a severe anxiety disorder So my story started in a small town in a small middle eastern country. I was the only child in a family of 3: Me, my mom and my dad. My mom and my dad belong to two different religions. As you probably already know, religion is a very big deal in the middle east. As such, there were always fights going on in the house about this particular topic and whether I should follow my mom's religion or my dad's. (Out of topic but kind of ironic, I am an atheist now). These fights would often turn physical and I have experienced a lot of verbal and physical abuse in our household. It always ends up with mom crying and in pain. These fights used to happen about twice a month but now are much less frequent as my mom and dad live in two different countries and I am living with my mom. These fights have always led to me internalizing hate towards my father and feeling like I should step up for my mom and protect her at all costs. Every time a fight breaks out, I would get really stressed and start crying (I am a 20 year old male and yes I still cry to this day). Things have been going south lately because I am experiencing this same anxiety outside the house. Every time I have a doctor's appointment, I get really anxious and get stomach cramps and the shivers. It is also spilling over to social situations. I used to be very outgoing but now I tend to isolate myself and hang out with the two friends that I trust the most and my girlfriend. I am going to the counseling center of my university soon but until then, any tips of how I can deal with this.  
Sorry for the long post",4.705454545454547,5.690811339563866,5.797027754177289,79.48877867459645,69.56074766355141,8.702407250070802,27.986547720192586,8.97023862654752,2.182481619937695,1284,43,246,23,22,427,171,321,0.179,0.753,0.068,-0.9894,3,0,0,0,6,0,28.0,1,1,0,0,13,12,6,1,20,1,21,4,1,4,1,44,39,30,0,4,6,13,1,1,2,4,3,0,0,2,11,23,0,1,2,0,1,7,0,8,0,4,4,3,38,4,43,30,6,54,0,0,0,0,29,26,0,4,20,177,49,1,0.0,0.0917688495435452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547104116150625,0.06193894021540707,0.1933406903899816,0.0,0.0,0.052670529389242965,0.0,0.1185022912024536,0.08749956713484874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04721448057643614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25523464350119696,0.04995061948846157,0.1597007789958677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184328805769488,0.08876756745757107,0.07927617672850386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860015176184239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051457324715554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301556432458398,0.0,0.039162440138589084,0.05533226366996187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05983980640710981,0.0,0.1213976032774191,0.0,0.13205455675072778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684912154822905,0.0,0.0,0.07646856049974275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787401605997265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065512561375834,0.042566008600521316,0.0,0.08737008127955223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037839503818389734,0.0,0.1367844033853086,0.06854325090640143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584756259065327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6349821141667701,0.06182205012338461,0.0,0.056936686776022614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127363744929557,0.0,0.0,0.05890631035591092,0.08241519217827932,0.0,0.08600211854637575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417832940074902,0.0,0.0835071698468715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923643632803926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749956713484874,0.0,0.0,0.08706014179810481,0.0,0.07895332989870074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670201810678993,0.1096429173162144,0.0,0.06185387021758496,0.0,0.0887218692025045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05145616886636235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032664863430348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424635635527118,0.2269802620195265,0.0,0.0,0.1337886247199157,0.0,0.12781326881860822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004042989188316,0.0,0.0,0.049877034851662304
mentalhealth,username65997,2020/02/09,"Should I bring up mental health in job interviews? (Technology) Hi! As the title states, is it bad to bring up the topic of mental health?

Reason why I wish to, is because due to my mental health, it's been difficult for me to work on my personal portfolio. A personal portfolio is one of the main ways to show interest in your craft, to the employer. I'm sure most people reading/hearing this will immediately label me a slacker making excuses who doesn't actually have any interest, drive or motivation.

Could I ask for some advice on this matter? Apologies if this isn't the right place, but I don't have anywhere I can ask this. Thanks!",3.6889791356184816,5.9666089262295126,5.37152011922504,76.30559612518631,74.49180327868855,9.026527570789868,27.484351713859912,9.573946990214177,2.8870229508196728,507,20,91,14,11,172,81,122,0.033,0.8340000000000001,0.133,0.8735,2,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,2,0,6,0,0,7,0,13,3,0,3,1,13,21,4,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,7,0,0,0,2,1,2,3,3,2,0,1,1,0,10,4,17,17,3,14,0,0,0,0,10,8,0,4,1,61,17,5,0.0,0.0,0.1515159083693676,0.0,0.0,0.1517228261886472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558529124428992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903029908527151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963950347120953,0.09464789400102386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396619488715535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4951172107544242,0.1749945531156209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407621468193905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036403644253758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4694107678897277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521135009561858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764096375715933,0.2711422199074304,0.16221852052426122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596379270393819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259516901809604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14633510206276373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294683601559832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232418580228809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010220337826124,0.0,0.1785466933984057,0.0,0.0,0.11303451973786666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,largeman_,2020/02/09,i think im going insane and i dont know what to do i feel on the verge of murder i could fucking kill somebody at any moment and im not afraid of what i might do i often day dream about killing people and fantasise about killing girls with my bare hands or sometimes by putting a shovel in there mouths and jumping on it with all my strength chopping their  fucking head in two and i find it funny im constantly depressed and feel sexually mentally and psychically unfulfilled im manipulative and i often laugh or fain interest to fit in and i think people are starting to notice i feel like killing somebody would make me feel something that isnt anger or sadness and i fucking crave it like a dog for table scraps what am i supposed to do in this situation and does anybody have advice for me,3.785024342745864,5.656346012658229,4.684177215189873,83.12669425511199,73.0506329113924,7.140019474196688,29.875365141187924,7.882392219407189,2.032882570593963,642,28,122,9,13,208,94,158,0.177,0.669,0.154,-0.8438,0,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,1,1,5,17,9,1,3,0,11,6,3,2,1,33,24,14,5,2,4,0,5,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,13,0,0,8,1,0,3,3,12,0,1,0,5,17,5,20,21,1,16,0,2,0,3,2,9,3,6,6,79,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376048503007635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916695362013408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258044680423659,0.0,0.09294879888515413,0.0,0.0,0.07507876647899478,0.0,0.10026903349541234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187653105082026,0.0,0.13643882551677453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354539525654479,0.08316769932734984,0.0,0.0,0.10640222454523543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32287448086740583,0.0,0.0,0.06616196375746161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947652508280973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5029975464528579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5151887528052375,0.0,0.06397925495998387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375007156890865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770866402834534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173200675093316,0.1234991061414992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254052412253425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16141655878323707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703035486129235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085659642715666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962281668654952,0.11513851934707492,0.0,0.08239992886535996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14918949792753836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372163323180662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269867144499897,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnchienAndalou137,2020/02/09,"weird desire to take out my heart whenever I feel frustrated or sad, my heart always feels heavy.  It's not reasonable since I don't necessarily want to die, I just always aim or hit my heart whenever I feel bad, sometimes I just want to stab my chest so I can take it out, and I mean this.

I'm not looking for encouraging words to continue living, I do want to live.
Just here to see if this is normal or if other people feel the same, because it makes me feel like im insane.",6.1681818181818135,4.798874505050506,7.269373737373737,78.21072727272728,66.57575757575758,10.748282828282829,29.901010101010105,9.888512548439397,2.4383882828282832,372,10,81,7,5,127,61,99,0.265,0.687,0.048,-0.9654,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,1,0,4,4,4,2,0,28,20,7,1,7,10,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,7,13,2,9,19,1,3,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,5,2,47,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25831379303883284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12960364347972356,0.09462171314887492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610956276938643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.392423800046311,0.11089041999267596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5518154179251058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167666082002284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583348651274499,0.0,0.2741272258499474,0.0,0.13034714205392633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361169613765188,0.0,0.0,0.169081946008435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520843182243221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761118885105032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15959376908944234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236916055267866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840100178078095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15351823930439407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334148153197238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746613570412175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UsertestXX,2020/02/09,"remembering everything is just a pain It's probably because I have a very few social interaction, so when it happens I'm really happy and I remember it. But it's so frustrating. The other people forget. They have so much social interaction that it's normal for them and they forget. I don't blame them, I'm probably the one who's not normal. But I still didn't explain why it's frustrating. Here's an exemple: I talked to someone at my school for a bit, and he tells me that I should come over to his place to play some video games. The day where we were supposed to play, he forgot and went to his house, leaving me alone once again. Things like that. And it happens almost every time. People just doesn't care about me. Maybe I should remind them, but it's not easy when you have social anxiety. So in the end I don't know if it's other people's fault or if it's mine. But it honestly hurt.",1.5308714408973287,3.7791776120218574,3.3838021282715016,87.95730802415878,81.62295081967213,6.694161633592177,20.01409260857061,7.85451343220497,0.8477497267759562,705,19,146,13,19,236,102,183,0.14800000000000002,0.778,0.07400000000000001,-0.9052,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,1,5,0,13,11,2,0,8,0,11,1,0,0,0,31,21,18,0,6,11,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,18,7,0,1,4,4,0,2,6,5,0,1,4,0,22,6,11,15,4,14,0,1,0,0,21,5,0,5,8,100,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248471764119288,0.13702846320167328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121324672200888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065212618159713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14444319840232647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13489414348220166,0.0,0.0,0.11396936204645215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853260189807734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718328844083728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147298139842672,0.0,0.11890753640543507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23399440535900154,0.14084152769734307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15266263453931458,0.14163563612007085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271157184792919,0.0,0.0,0.14009228456067074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06463772129546436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291852827615552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725967097716334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25926234508925805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14090090219429885,0.08965354351736793,0.0,0.1407822430256817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27517165647100056,0.0,0.1382309529905989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852951347692797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475820857103225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997523880312143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339000989551815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4046059925495805,0.11210191154847468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565924023102637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063420456163194,0.11564072589810932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789780960340879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771483258342829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916578726046093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264840447957576,0.11938501859387465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mac1C03,2020/02/09,"I can’t tell if my thoughts are normal or if I need help. I (18F) struggle with my insecurities a lot, but I have always thought that’s normal. However, my thoughts don’t stop there. I hate taking pictures and hate looking at pictures of myself. Since I basically think I’m ugly, I’ve depended on my grades for some sort of approval. That worked for a while, but lately it’s been doing more harm than good. Also, I keep comparing myself to other girls and I can’t seem to stop. Last Saturday, I couldn’t get myself to get out of bed till like 2 pm even though I was up from 11 am. I am terrified of death and it frequently takes me a while to calm myself before I sleep. I care way too much about what other people think of me. I mean if these thoughts are normal, then how do people become happy.


Sorry for the paragraph being all over the place. I just thought it would be easier to express my thoughts this way.",2.5802229729729724,4.396908627027031,3.908564189189189,87.63419763513514,76.24324324324324,6.570945945945946,22.91385135135135,7.413659706084162,0.8735472972972977,716,21,147,9,16,235,117,185,0.19699999999999998,0.664,0.139,-0.9206,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,8,10,2,2,5,0,16,1,1,2,1,37,37,16,1,9,7,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,10,5,0,3,10,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,8,1,26,5,23,25,5,18,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,9,11,104,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956603928129112,0.09953375762809984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211133667251151,0.10178815222956558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196097282358954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900814780934581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499344651014,0.0,0.0,0.10033191842415587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733814299502852,0.0,0.2362007651342951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017903443271628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063241101356866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750659371418634,0.13493702453144266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058440486494026535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045101109069003,0.0,0.0,0.1016969887002974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030168645126156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793475967651755,0.08869701288944064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516077904573721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585945122275256,0.0,0.12497786090535293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889792198014014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989512332276596,0.0,0.11970679111345522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390524734397335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20001602579051594,0.0,0.12505321726470972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987931175900052,0.0,0.1045535044330546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329584796618262,0.11752643829620475,0.5697914280396129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18989821556654232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708507782987501,0.0,0.0,0.08497490199340486,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustABasicGuyEating,2020/02/09,"I don’t know anymore I don’t know why I’m posting this, I guess it’s so that there’s something left behind. I’m done with this world, I’m taking 300 mg of Antidepressants tonight and I hope I never wake up again. That’s all there is to say, this world is a joke!",-1.2974152542372863,0.7170106779661047,0.8862500000000004,101.84429025423731,94.76271186440678,3.6279661016949154,15.84957627118644,5.148860815047168,-1.0968152542372884,206,5,52,1,8,68,39,59,0.0,0.889,0.111,0.6588,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,5,1,1,0,2,8,13,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,5,2,5,12,1,8,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,2,3,29,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026705577110895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3123195446337474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3362057297113729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30312662283544595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3354534123175483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315943030266135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353845190139629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29229160233256674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24270261283873265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349533430626614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294679954362942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27539022227897114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alybun1307,2020/02/09,"I’m so worthless and boring I don’t even know why I’m alive I’m gonna be 21 next month. In about 5th grade I’ve started developing social anxiety and in 7th grade is when it really became bad and has f gotten better ever since, only became worse. I was never bullied or anything, except for in like pre-k to around 3rd grade, but that was more like just teasing. You know how little kids are. But that’s about it. In 5th grade and up I was pretty much adored by everyone because of how “sweet” and kind I was. I would literally never talk unless spoken to first because of social anxiety and I could never hold a conversation because I genuinely just never know what to say, I hate that so much about me. I feel like I would just come off as rude or uninterested and it always made me awful. Still does. So because of social anxiety I’ve never really had a life, I’ve NEVER had a friend group or anything like that. Never partied. Never really been invited anywhere with friends because like I said, I never had any. I have one best friend with kindergarten, and we’ve done a lot together. But that’s it. Now she has a boyfriend and it’s like she’d rather be with him all the time. And when we do hang out she just HAS to bring her boyfriend along every time and I end up being the third wheel. She ends up running off with him and then I’m all by myself. It’s embarrassing and awkward. Another thing I hate about myself is how “risk-free” my life is. I hardly drink, I’ve never smoked or engaged in other risky behavior, and I’m still a virgin. (I’m a girl btw if that makes a difference). Like I said, I’m almost 21. And it seems like most people my age have already lost their virginity, been to a gazillion parties, smoke, drink a lot, and then there’s me. I’m not saying I wanna destroy my health, I just feel like I’m waaaayyy too innocent for me age and I feel like my time to go out live risky and make memories is running out. It’s been eating at me and because of it I get heavily depressed and it just makes me not wanna be alive. I’m literally the most boring person in the world and I’m such a burden I don’t even know why I was born if this is how I turned out. I feel like a coward and boring because so don’t parry, smoke, I’m still a virgin, etc. my life isn’t going anywhere I won’t have any crazy stories to tell when I’m older. Like ffs I’m an adult now, I should partying it up, smoking it up and losing my virginity, right? Why am I even alive?",0.9963409713215156,3.1459656653696517,3.06735840899265,90.02467646634966,83.00778210116732,5.752932699236203,20.024355094394004,7.016131500887134,0.40552353365038174,1928,54,411,25,54,651,220,514,0.159,0.679,0.162,0.6759999999999999,0,0,5,0,0,0,55.0,1,1,1,5,35,37,5,2,18,1,40,11,0,8,13,97,81,47,0,9,20,0,5,12,3,5,4,4,0,4,22,35,3,1,9,2,0,7,17,16,0,3,17,10,52,21,48,53,11,63,0,4,0,4,29,22,0,12,46,269,74,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633925387852153,0.0,0.06986054342427496,0.0,0.05267626521262708,0.0,0.0,0.08610148549901935,0.06638261923420724,0.14528841022508013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419207844862263,0.056356405575091924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052858469663169434,0.2701383366832269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643650042820295,0.05598965222567004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05453313659483986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050545267269991284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054525988046294285,0.0,0.0,0.06614205173842053,0.0,0.0,0.0554001402090817,0.06478475759908703,0.0,0.12403297549882294,0.0,0.06477858251501742,0.0,0.0,0.11214193289196583,0.0,0.07060373089781315,0.1254404811133722,0.057264555637033365,0.0533386448083894,0.060492287098960026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803912589447422,0.1809053432062196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05384866653057939,0.0,0.0,0.1467318522341876,0.0,0.03307515005516902,0.0,0.071957339553368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056710389402650024,0.12500456572863236,0.0,0.06729208655186368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592421045489716,0.13916687812966733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414623268642034,0.37114160731878665,0.06344996805708583,0.05590099653990509,0.0,0.0,0.0708240301819148,0.06910676685100592,0.10764222462329784,0.0,0.05990235231442745,0.1267731882375306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05053082258658075,0.0,0.09307545163594147,0.0,0.4882604777353895,0.0,0.06732741846849441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042898274124332884,0.04814761580833901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04388891090234473,0.05527698896410932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440569681205165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166772409379953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406359582812169,0.12043838197537401,0.10068809468751627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05763206329216675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0523679757383658,0.0,0.0,0.1935996961166099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04480882461616312,0.0,0.15167049310174482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05088354620258195,0.055332866553712036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042058173981321625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074397843174898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885953600791077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17137341324338662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451495952554355,0.08994255980059378,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mannup,2020/02/09,"Panic Attacks from lack of social interactions I'm almost 30 with no dating experience. I also don't have any friends or any social groups. I don't meet anyone during the day and I work long hours.

No one knows that I spaz out sometimes when I'm alone. No one knows I'm shouting. No one hears me cry. No one talks to me. 

I'm freaking out and I can't get my thoughts together. Life shouldn't be this hard. I don't deserve this. Please just talk to me.",-0.4861954887218048,1.7491468842105284,1.4648496240601538,96.6464473684211,95.94736842105264,3.977443609022557,17.312030075187973,5.773587663045528,-0.48337593984962396,354,10,79,3,14,116,61,95,0.312,0.6609999999999999,0.026000000000000002,-0.9737,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,1,1,0,7,1,0,0,0,13,16,5,0,2,2,0,1,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,10,3,0,4,1,3,10,1,7,13,1,7,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,2,5,44,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17138536996535794,0.17726326688642335,0.0,0.13687128253346714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23278031184101936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11967441090459635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19471165888346328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880039324830172,0.11037975995311436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742083074301814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322326636686332,0.0,0.08942056805882223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331979527722395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929022791180539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16855158630882894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881228244856128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208906818740796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15146534034882891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4639117929372997,0.0,0.0,0.20081159439662727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18787499615402206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3489385993993823,0.0,0.0,0.1692750523604141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751331799670019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358766521843643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246016866710278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheBlackstarCowboy,2020/02/09,"In Addition to Things Like Meds, Therapy, Etc. What Are Some “In The Moment” Things You Do To Help When You Start Slipping? I came to this sub because I thought it would help me learn some things about dealing with my depression, and getting a lot of perspectives on different things. 

Lately I’ve been finding myself slipping into negative mental self-talk when I make mistakes at work, and they come out of nowhere. Like one minute I’ll be fine and if I make an oopsie it’ll be not a big deal and I’ll acknowledge the mistake and move on, and then in another instant or on a different day I could make a mistake and start feeling worthless and angry with myself and unable to just move on. I’m a manager and so some aforementioned mistakes include things like lapses in judgment, making decisions on things that were not as strong or effective as other choices, thus yielding a less desirable outcome, and things that also sometimes affect my associates and comanagers, in which they may have to compensate for my mistakes. 

Today I was actively spiraling and not taking feedback very well at all from my superior, so what I thought would help would be to just go to the bathroom and spend a minute alone to do some deep breathing. It helped a little, and my mood and capacity to receive feedback improved. Also a coffee seemed to help as well. 

What are some things some of you might do in similar situations? I can provide more context if needed.",7.287030669144982,7.794849085501858,7.021893587360598,74.6639927973978,63.72118959107807,10.14507434944238,36.88684944237919,9.978442167317967,3.7872395910780687,1160,54,198,23,16,366,149,269,0.105,0.754,0.14,0.7993,2,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,3,2,3,11,16,0,0,13,0,20,1,1,7,1,69,37,30,0,13,9,0,1,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,19,23,0,1,9,0,1,6,4,7,2,1,6,1,21,8,36,21,11,33,0,2,0,0,13,18,0,14,12,155,40,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242798778203308,0.0,0.15817659576399154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103702655535495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06028700024873914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311239749959574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519144235047915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896160924527633,0.0,0.0,0.06378070822256332,0.20391796723170572,0.08518027491725715,0.0,0.0,0.2066536839602673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029685886578804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05000554934738975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039052659249536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051669863776458484,0.0,0.05620573037820332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33144455989781346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11156069170993962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14494897422952566,0.09912127989326863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407912093525835,0.0,0.0,0.26405940636458136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985283163078677,0.0,0.09966542266724117,0.10491462265515636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102247900880396,0.0,0.07333124577862392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701550791310923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003257292848198,0.10317166497770684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111649376665405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781215984293397,0.0,0.14000032411272678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435861474574723,0.07949006720650252,0.0,0.0,0.11309791434627893,0.0,0.5256248553192844,0.0,0.0,0.15702714176785346,0.0,0.0,0.09374326961197847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160079783770043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17784146566169998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199856046959861,0.0,0.0,0.21076184710504567,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hanhanc11,2020/02/09,"Suicidal thoughts relapse Hello there,

I am reaching out to see if anyone happens to have any advice. 

For a while I was severely depressed and was close to commiting suicide. Things god better. I started college, made friends, and my depression improved.

Now my life is better than its ever been but I’ve started to become increasingly suicidal again. Last Thursday I saw a new therapist but don’t trust her too much yet (She thinks I’m just an anxious/ moderately depressed student because I was too nervous to tell her the truth) I’m scared that I’m gonna take my life soon, the thoughts are getting to much to bear.

I have no one in my life that I trust with this information. My parents would be mad (I’ve been through this before with them and they don’t understand) and they would think I was crazy.

Any advice would be appreciated",4.1253638814016185,6.407737515723273,4.57261904761905,82.50750000000002,73.21383647798744,7.310152740341421,31.482929020664873,8.192908349453996,2.4638513926325243,671,32,122,11,14,212,101,159,0.214,0.653,0.132,-0.9524,1,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,3,2,9,12,1,2,5,0,18,3,0,1,3,25,35,8,3,4,4,1,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,6,0,1,10,2,19,6,14,19,3,15,0,3,2,0,11,3,0,1,11,83,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493040978992203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17349298353007991,0.0,0.0,0.1441086802795246,0.0,0.08919427264202358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776057309480794,0.14088213790352938,0.10854581340660116,0.0,0.0,0.22563633496320365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296067294745389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538707550064665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985540364584998,0.0,0.0666458474034309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280260002523368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398000450330518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703023066698712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070218955302894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18754540301064915,0.0,0.0,0.12320011409757745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643927015877685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164243562326578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277117527677031,0.0,0.10165034866412374,0.0,0.0,0.1441086802795246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18057799179835915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4185961663568497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591070169868454,0.0,0.11149475586904492,0.0,0.0,0.14810924123851002,0.08474648310138362,0.16347307761139204,0.0,0.2025398590894944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279647561994742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718490213443885,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaliBounded,2020/02/09,"Is it a bad idea for my boyfriend and I to have the same therapist (but to see her separately)? So my boyfriend and I have had a ton of relationship issues for the last 3.5 years... I'll spare the details, but basically, he's been willing to see a therapist. He just started seeing her, and even after only *two sessions* I'm already seeing an enormous difference in his behavior and efforts towards our relationship. I'd been receiving therapy for about 3.5 years, but he hadn't had any since he was a child. It feels like the emotional effort in our relationship is balancing out.

My problem is that my therapist that I've been seeing for 3 years just moved to a new practice, and I am not able to see her anymore. I am looking for a new one, and my boyfriend and I had an issue that we needed a bit more help to solve, and the therapist that my boyfriend sees has told him since he started that he was welcome to bring me in for couple's counseling. Our last session with a couple's counselor was disastrous, but we just had one with her tonight and I already feel a difference. She revealed to me at the end of the session that she does EMDR therapy, which I hear is very ideal for people suffering with PTSD (I am). She said that she could work with me on prices, and to call whenever I'm ready to start if I'm interested.

However, I have a bit of trepidation on us sharing the same therapist. I *highly* doubt her sharing his information with me or my information with him will be an issue - I've had a few therapists, and I know that they tend to take that very seriously. I guess I'm worried about... I don't know, being very honest and open about someone that is a patient that she is equally invested in. My last therapist was very emotionally invested in my well-being, and this woman seems to be the same way with her patients. I couldn't imagine how she'd handle, say, hearing that one of her patients (me) is not interested in continuing the relationship with her other patient (him) if something were to go wildly awry with our relationship and counseling. On the other hand, not only is her therapy well within my price range, she's a 4 minute drive from our home, and I hear that finding someone who specializes in EMDR is difficult, let alone someone at her price point and credentials (she's ran the mental health department in the biggest hospital in our city, and one or two other therapy centers). She says that she has also done this before (treating a husband, wife, and children in a family, all separately, and then together for couple's or group counseling).

Should I consider receiving treatment from her? I really want to do it, but if you all have had bad experiences with this, I can look for someone else.",7.36038713195202,6.8781922251908405,7.922311886586693,71.59572519083972,63.77099236641222,11.531515812431845,37.2257360959651,10.98876172936215,4.128417884405671,2162,97,398,53,28,720,223,524,0.064,0.8370000000000001,0.099,0.96,1,1,1,0,0,0,72.0,9,1,1,4,11,18,0,1,31,0,47,2,1,1,2,76,81,34,0,10,17,2,3,1,0,3,1,7,1,3,25,33,0,0,11,0,5,8,6,7,1,6,19,19,70,11,61,52,11,49,0,1,9,0,71,24,0,9,17,290,95,4,0.05733319296061722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05937989712089085,0.12653720822439715,0.045849333696693514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03898853725217926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05685912152841489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574164262609107,0.0,0.0,0.04878632442029132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251859950924099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058543600248049575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045775889334681866,0.19031426254849346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980196779152424,0.0,0.0,0.0501726635214055,0.058671762058139565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04789452588396046,0.12898425048778392,0.050780191569860834,0.0,0.0,0.03786803322826685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608286409267296,0.05404863179976575,0.0,0.05797877006117433,0.04095884450677857,0.0,0.0,0.052401499687637305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03258377480346903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315897584744813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060942503096165286,0.19385602594847676,0.0,0.03842923070966232,0.06057566617361537,0.0575098672023177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647221962323046,0.0,0.17952287345914753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301764691725123,0.14020261326669733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058627074244898325,0.0,0.02801010206911976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09629088470658448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05777837359340358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06093611071542662,0.0,0.04251183611404751,0.0,0.11074551005420526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15540182137924208,0.08720895355834116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039747617076667824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05419839907345956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486012264647126,0.06701943446755146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03672911151088095,0.0,0.0,0.30777196445605354,0.0,0.0,0.05453699567462801,0.09118731245629652,0.0,0.0,0.3198099228526722,0.052193985587210064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09485321936378202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943129133691502,0.044137892987461035,0.0,0.0,0.12174218720954873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04310742590248303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26226201115111153,0.4659777918791659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05478432283387697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201239736751284,0.0,0.06896477188176492,0.0,0.0,0.18922355444085784,0.03381660265998044,0.045508419931670506,0.0,0.0,0.10309885182253437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04173924731036189,0.058224640470920935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076208957220599
mentalhealth,veggietells,2020/02/09,"Do I have suppressed or repressed memories. I have a lot of blank memories. I remember a lot of details about my past with getting bullied and having an emotional and mentally abusive best friend. However, there is a lot of blank memories where I only get parts and piece or it just seems like a blank spot. Every now and then I get flash backs of random memories good and bad memories that I have forgotten and then I forget them again. I also forget telling people things and when people tell me things I often forget what they said. It’s gotten bad where my boyfriend will my plans with me and I know we’re going somewhere but I can’t remember where. 

I’m also scarred of the dark and for the longest time it was a phobia. I went to a hynotherapist to take care of my phobia and he tried to bring me to the time I first started fearing the dark which I honestly couldn’t remember. I did get a glance of what may have happened though. Well being hypnotized I saw that it was it was late at night I walked past a train track with someone I knew but still couldn’t remember who. The rest was blank from there. My hynotherapist asked if they hurt me and I burst into uncontrollable tears. He made me visualize a happy place at the begin of the session incase things got too much and I would go there when he snaps his finger. He snapped his finger I immediately went to my happy place and stopped crying. I still don’t know what happened and I’m thinking about trying to find a hynotherapist or someone that helps recover memories. 

Does anyone understand this problem at all with memory lost. I feel like I can’t trust my memories at all. I just don’t understand why I’m like this.",3.0886704578880284,5.3954098662613985,4.0073909206785,85.23433179723503,76.47720364741642,7.5278360623590554,25.202568879301893,8.460557738077197,1.8154348661633493,1342,48,258,27,31,431,163,329,0.155,0.716,0.13,-0.5842,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,3,4,23,20,0,3,18,0,22,2,2,1,2,59,55,27,0,5,8,0,3,3,1,3,0,1,0,0,18,19,0,3,13,0,0,6,6,8,1,1,14,6,42,12,27,35,10,35,0,2,2,0,16,10,0,11,22,181,60,1,0.0,0.11074743744016746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949689226214244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.065356852739234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873824414210847,0.0,0.0,0.07187316130502609,0.15608817924550875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980916819325476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529955856470927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267312148697216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179679690203659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514190198622247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875305513588726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105180469179874,0.047261569811820336,0.0667754520154925,0.0,0.0,0.08543048198912383,0.07950608830634777,0.0,0.0,0.07221519338496775,0.0,0.19533822992913968,0.0,0.10624305041186263,0.07839874768466168,0.07475701860759082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16531157663095108,0.19900249292745648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265140733695893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006226549824593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273805104916324,0.0,0.105438966041066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13699511662415256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203425751874687,0.2383962157595388,0.0,0.08844419035268505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941964320497616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871168362839626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877158744357562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108864231622262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012196067859031,0.17845662631583542,0.12960156121562194,0.0,0.19531387293654132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943878987448506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4235361079535864,0.0,0.08891199401725182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509217049566058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583947591652013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615900813092952,0.0,0.14929156585108466,0.07814564988455402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027829726461808,0.0,0.16339493836730487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862932423403902,0.05989221921881197,0.09183444039521896,0.0,0.1090069769705545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692087341191224,0.0,0.0,0.19461248899277472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840413409561475,0.1732964605259038,0.08434272443219169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06639886892968927,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CompetitiveJaguar3,2020/02/09,I mean nothing All I want to do is be loved by someone forever. Beside myself. It’s too much to ask. Yet here I am living this life.,-1.4012068965517237,0.5962936206896536,1.8857758620689644,94.45556034482763,95.55172413793105,4.279310344827587,17.594827586206893,5.985473137389443,-0.2472827586206896,101,3,23,1,4,36,26,29,0.043,0.818,0.139,0.5687,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,3,7,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,18,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616932315003866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732743478863034,0.0,0.0,0.34163408251680605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34918652362724395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4214404849109512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844112671746675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3712347845532184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32781363946512165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281998329417067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jorg0808,2020/02/09,"Indecisiveness, OCD, Mental Health and University study Hello everyone, this is my first post to this forum, so thank you for taking the time to read it. 

I guess I need some advice on how to make an informed, appropriate and educated decision. 

I am a 29 year old female, and am very fortunate to have a supportive family and a wonderful partner. I have been diagnosed with OCD, Pure O to be exact, severe depression and anxiety. I take 60mg of Duloxetine per day, which has helped significantly with OCD and depression symptoms. I have also suffered from Anorexia, and delusions. In other words, I have been very sick in the past 5 years. It is only the past 6 months, with the help of medication and CBT that I have begun to feel like 'myself'. 

Somewhere in between all of that... I have been studying an undegraduate degree in Psychological Science. I find it very challenging, especially the Biopsychology/Statistics component. I just don't know if I want to continue anymore. I know studying is such a great opportunity, and please believe me, I am so grateful. But I have finally started living life on my own terms and enjoying my own hobbies, interests, and spending quality time with family and my partner. I feel like such a failure if I were to quit now! The path to becoming a Clinical Psychologist is an extremely difficult, time consuming one, yet as I can only imagine, immensely rewarding. I just don't know if I have the energy. 

I am half way through my undergraduate degree. This semeser will be my 3rd year subjects, which are much more challenging. I guess I need some help in making the decision... Should I stick it out and finish it? Or should I opt out? I am so scared I will regret it, but I guess I want to focus on the present moment and during the Christmas/New Year break I feel so rested and mentally well. I don't want to go back to severe anxiety, depression. 

Anyone had any similar experiences? Anyone able to offer some advice? Thank you! I'm sorry for the long post!",5.099548640313992,7.050506189701897,6.576749836463883,70.57365853658541,69.75880758807588,10.292907204934119,31.694327632931504,10.47874826744603,3.846161498925333,1580,70,269,48,29,538,198,369,0.105,0.78,0.115,0.4417,0,0,0,1,0,0,57.0,0,2,0,6,14,21,0,2,20,0,34,7,0,3,3,63,59,28,0,11,8,0,3,2,2,4,7,0,0,2,14,21,0,0,12,1,1,1,3,8,1,3,5,3,41,13,36,48,10,40,0,5,0,0,10,10,0,12,27,192,55,3,0.09074337363282617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17734674897931632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256744310949317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170860579319418,0.0,0.13883686490715216,0.0,0.08999304317189166,0.1268997534652007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977605306946816,0.0,0.0,0.1002189268326696,0.0,0.10223670783030936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058521968981174524,0.0,0.2344714042271557,0.0921026141043096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670918222801084,0.0,0.0887644317011303,0.1710895534151807,0.0,0.13764772872618894,0.12965416850934874,0.0,0.09940493031369946,0.0829377995455794,0.07718626725580803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05157155041740109,0.0,0.0,0.10004488978244147,0.29989216966488275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645596282024088,0.0,0.0,0.18247011167358276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14961055501308887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409472839724463,0.08866525746429901,0.0,0.0801280614134585,0.08030503013761182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211438130675113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141440224798034,0.18289595510526374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243049509143855,0.0,0.06670682068651695,0.1345701234872566,0.0,0.0876405157123353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521990594918622,0.0,0.061490058430571225,0.13802884940157256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732496359185638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960897452516833,0.0,0.0,0.1738141363099111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096516747681155,0.0907679300784616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084994731598106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20502836626139012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015797775125264,0.06422862691089525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297450504090223,0.0,0.09431711022171553,0.1364554476393939,0.0,0.0,0.16708861336872946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587395727125435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22461835998589386,0.1605683785451459,0.07202786623336653,0.0,0.0,0.08158919073697876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840731785163934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337430299246798
mentalhealth,GrotiusandPufendorf,2020/02/09,"Any good mental health app recommendations?  Does anyone know of a really good mood tracker? Maybe one that also pays attention to things like sleep, diet, exercise, etc?

Right now I'm having to piece things together with the use of a few different apps and I'd love one that is all-inclusive.

Also, any other mental health related apps that you use that you think are great, I would love to hear about them.",4.982807017543858,6.930091315789479,5.3421052631578965,79.32307017543863,70.05263157894737,9.27719298245614,23.19298245614036,9.725611199111238,2.106419298245614,324,8,59,8,6,103,56,76,0.0,0.75,0.25,0.9696,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,1,0,4,7,0,0,3,0,4,7,1,2,0,8,12,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,7,2,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,4,6,7,11,3,2,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,2,34,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26535216773474896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256454356591637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600630814630135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333791622070016,0.0,0.0,0.14518667942377572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18503060110131156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783105030616437,0.0,0.18291348872868052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35270360548151924,0.18698969198463236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911783654570402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105397290700994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994758029493024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16667627778040384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343912647154452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22484628918328184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628452555992586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14168400885576368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660272113697557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22044300248808865,0.10630675969028867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865814418540027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785585331589035,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,C_the_orb,2020/02/09,"Don’t have motivation to do anything anymore when it feels like just months ago I could do anything. I used to be pretty good mental health wise. I had big projects and life was good.

Now I cut, barely eat, have no motivation, bad grades, and I think about suicide every day. 

First time posting here since I need actual help. I’m a 5 foot 5 teen and weigh 108 pounds and am steadily decreasing in weight. 

I’ve got a suicide plan, the stuff ready for it, and I think I’m going to if I don’t get help. I’m really on my last strands. Please help. 

I don’t eat lunch or breakfast, I regularly do stupid shit that might get me killed because in the back of my head the thought “it wouldn’t be that bad if you died” keeps circulating.",2.2556685596282904,4.03222102013423,3.2142281879194634,92.43241094475997,77.05369127516778,6.463810015487868,22.870934434692828,7.321109707123232,0.6211007743933918,568,17,128,7,13,181,98,149,0.204,0.609,0.187,-0.7806,0,0,0,0,0,2,17.0,0,1,0,4,6,10,4,0,5,0,16,11,3,3,0,21,30,9,4,5,4,0,2,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,6,5,6,1,6,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,4,2,14,4,9,21,0,15,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,4,10,65,20,4,0.0,0.0,0.13561091816035634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318510893459066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13781708138046528,0.0,0.0,0.22871460468459834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068563929537846,0.23206186445749796,0.08471247637002502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109531645252082,0.0,0.0,0.08962167160208567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422492576158874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28439413269323643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708497654913855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026546187375561,0.09927744669462696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820453782777032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452081575180777,0.0,0.0789776666093637,0.23311643004329585,0.11114392648577562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14261936360030206,0.14771452113512126,0.0,0.0,0.2794382470430257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351950093079267,0.15374545754529986,0.0,0.0,0.11327596137572025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815590281472868,0.06789184237406619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14004519594228446,0.14742112654263145,0.0,0.0,0.1109214566439064,0.0,0.0,0.10304164081104862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254310405015334,0.0,0.0,0.13309115974189129,0.14137853573069994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902527534825913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14264675794319834,0.11495423690044745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15908299658180358,0.304012830151114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17808779787934664,0.0,0.110323601950489,0.08103228071766455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002213697782768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16922333533283412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Foreign-Movie,2020/02/09,"No idea what to do with an old mate that keeps sending weird messages to me .... Hey There  
This is going to sound really bizzare but a friend I haven't met up with for a few years now because I moved out of town sends me really odd messages about God raping him, that there's demons after him and that people from our hometown have taken his powers away from him etc.  


He states that he constantly gets tired from defending god and the demons away that he cant do anything else apart from that and that he has to lay down on the regular to gain back his energy.  


He's gained over 40 extra KGs and says he cant do anything. Now these types of messages have been IN and OUT over the course of a year... and only just a few weeks ago we were having a normal chat back and forth online about computers and gaming etc like none of this existed and just now today another block of messages with the above context begin to flood in... again.   


He's done this to me roughly twice before today and I messaged a family member (not his mom) to see how hes coping and if they know anything or if they can fill me in on things I may have missed over the years etc.  


Question, what does this sound like? I personally don't really know how to tackle it apart from the fact talking to him helps so I can do that but seeing as I'm out of town I can do much else.... Just looking for any possible direction for answers really.",6.282,5.3773946035087725,6.476842105263156,82.46789473684213,66.12280701754386,9.705263157894738,28.47368421052632,8.841846274778883,1.8870631578947368,1102,27,232,15,15,354,155,285,0.078,0.821,0.10099999999999999,0.7909,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,2,0,2,3,16,6,1,0,13,0,23,2,0,2,1,39,36,20,0,3,9,1,1,2,2,1,1,3,0,1,17,18,0,2,5,2,0,5,7,3,0,1,5,7,23,3,46,30,8,42,2,1,3,1,38,19,0,5,19,162,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063831652204242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161209766076055,0.12584277199214888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962783057415472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255099580155134,0.18456323828064508,0.0,0.0731580419731485,0.0,0.10212115031003924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12969005453081375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502308123859024,0.12281367582596725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20050881614642388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4015344367998398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131363864292297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272077158000716,0.0,0.06270118014346007,0.0,0.06820543674713793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044133867908976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354786450582859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667194751958373,0.0,0.0,0.13191062596929215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172633469559107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007796347383558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055629784173668,0.0,0.1275534854413227,0.08822243663633847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758602297346933,0.0,0.0,0.12593213156714184,0.0,0.0,0.09127433518037724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320102869368898,0.1047896211217646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529520323426086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444061326612652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075303714248919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543815149399572,0.0,0.0,0.1912676354658112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646088956405376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973046649551646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379358391397257,0.2275141912743197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626617774959303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231850874856084
mentalhealth,arg0nnn,2020/02/09,"OCD convincing me I’m not allowed to enjoy things.. 
Hey guys, new to this subreddit.

I’m a really big gamer and it’s usually my escape but- 

Does anyone have mental health issues that convince them they don’t deserve to enjoy the little things that bring them joy? It’s only a few more weeks till a game called animal  crossing  comes out and I’m already stressing and catastrophsing it :( 
(I have ocd/anxiety/depression/) 
Ocd is the worst because of constantly convincing myself I’ve hurt people and stuff, false memories, the textbook ocd.

Ocd part of it makes me think ive done bad things, including hurting animals, hence why I’m stressing about the game Animal Crossing, because well, animals... :( 

Would love some insight and coping methods for people who also have mental health issues.

Hope this isn’t a stupid post, 

- A",4.619742857142857,7.2698619266666675,5.0299047619047625,78.08400000000002,73.06666666666666,8.285714285714286,28.04761904761905,9.04235418022936,2.788761904761905,659,26,106,15,14,209,97,150,0.23,0.626,0.14400000000000002,-0.9575,1,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,3,0,3,16,1,2,9,0,9,3,0,2,0,16,19,8,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,13,7,0,0,2,2,0,4,3,7,1,0,1,0,9,9,9,17,5,13,0,2,0,1,10,3,0,2,5,62,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208100084833984,0.11020967910809748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636264217821723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506880100925647,0.16802007704646452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407233404928539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187144214206139,0.0,0.14892780319643725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186988595832142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060182124503628,0.1410314076080135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364573699622018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29297933770221746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13688024024266265,0.0,0.0,0.2950651349207625,0.0,0.0,0.2876836903436916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812567399187756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438237239755658,0.0,0.09199180921916196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777678757663604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13310146671353634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481363644888568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14923896028234826,0.0,0.1910855303725824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198756471454384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828707567088677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157305792018177,0.0,0.15776387663196104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746721774301479,0.08830554483504288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517824760146088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054595069939076,0.0,0.12391119411833705,0.0,0.1243555562141734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789899879724506,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fantastic-Giraffe,2020/02/09,"Depression effecting my love life? I’ve been pretty depressed these past few months, and realized I have had barely any sex Drive for the past 4 months. Only until like the week before my period do I actually get in the mood, and it only lasts about 2 days. This is starting to really effect me as I’m a young adult living in a city, going out, feeling so numb. Any help?",4.491756756756757,5.3221722297297305,5.968486486486487,78.63191891891893,69.94594594594595,9.163243243243244,24.259459459459467,9.3871,1.9207762162162163,291,7,56,6,5,99,61,74,0.122,0.7,0.17800000000000002,0.5585,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,5,0,5,4,0,2,0,7,11,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,2,1,5,2,8,9,1,16,0,2,0,2,3,3,0,0,12,30,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.20663153482117128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879862717934754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801784918658544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655732007123578,0.0,0.3647494795774864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706409505113892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062746592805736,0.0,0.12033895713905922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192749536081134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17259956701813164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14956100235515005,0.1034473903863838,0.0,0.1869737727492587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19110716716202406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3380239753826935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220816061889217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.404267088005308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21541970384906925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356485859150076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14987344608361602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984821138375675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IWorshipJojo,2020/02/09,"Either obsessed or overly distracted Hi. I'm not sure if this is the right sub for this question, but I've been noticing this trait I have for quite a while.

All the time, either while studying or during the holidays, I have to be extremely obsessed with something, sometimes to the point I can't stop daydreaming about things I'll do. I always want to be focused on something, working on something, or I feel like I'm wasting my time, no matter what I do, even if I still do things I enjoy during that time. And when I find some random ""project"" to work on (writing a story, travel journal, organising a part of the house, binge watching a certain series, even cooking new food) I suddenly find that it's the only thing I can think about for a long while, and it becomes my main focus in life, with my hobbies and studies in between. 

I don't know, I suddenly woke up at 5 am and couldn't fall asleep thinking about my next project, and I just wondered if there's a name for this, or if this is just... a quirk of mine? I feel like other people just work through their things gradually and don't think too much about it, being either lazy or working hard, but patiently and slowly. Instead, I'm either extremely focused on something or I suddenly have lost interest. Is this normal?",7.232826691380911,6.48086274297189,7.186827309236946,77.65167747914738,64.14056224899598,9.589249304911958,36.02131603336422,8.617729084823388,2.965715848007414,1009,42,189,12,13,323,134,249,0.084,0.7829999999999999,0.133,0.935,0,0,4,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,1,6,14,10,0,3,13,0,19,4,1,0,3,51,32,23,0,7,20,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,17,9,2,1,10,3,0,2,6,4,0,0,3,4,22,6,27,25,9,28,0,1,1,0,5,11,0,14,17,141,39,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320883893251533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698927874037345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16385072554136235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543381225075076,0.17722431871011302,0.0,0.0,0.2267354021667476,0.0,0.14998620501062826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111291626376156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312220884982155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816756964283979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761110193146128,0.1211965648928142,0.0,0.0,0.10976896785317893,0.0,0.0,0.13540119331320088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09118157160240632,0.0,0.0,0.11979584510930424,0.1319149081736948,0.0,0.12153006402887505,0.0,0.14121710879991184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433583616623416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343201379496113,0.0,0.08599173684693552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725519196938093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389499867854194,0.13192876903664846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059270419308252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3819594086795142,0.1226759055114693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905622219144966,0.10370060510961382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690353884641505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296190636684241,0.23843397745839434,0.0,0.0,0.2169811657408181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731603203126712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134512989924337,0.3612020679356608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,who_the_hell_knows_,2020/02/09,"Is it possible I have some form of anxiety? Ok so I am in my early teens. And I have feelings of doubt such as all of my friends hate me and they’re just with me out of pity because they know I’d be a no one with out them, I constantly think everything is my fault despite it not, I froze when ordering a salad at a restaurant. Can this mean I have some form of anxiety or just low self esteem? If so how do I cope with this?",0.3482795698924725,2.073449849462364,2.6507526881720445,94.46279569892474,82.76344086021507,6.713978494623658,22.161290322580648,7.793537801064563,0.8223032258064524,328,11,80,6,9,112,62,93,0.20199999999999999,0.742,0.055,-0.9009,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,2,0,7,7,1,1,3,1,9,1,0,1,1,21,14,9,0,1,5,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,7,1,0,4,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,0,2,14,2,13,13,5,9,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,5,3,62,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.456503697141922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818832760368796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32243142860662866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26815526497340986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508645827093929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305195332842383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945781067103159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16397607254289526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250118523041202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021828930651872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363667770845309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31126445739381736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19118312607817148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thomaserikson,2020/02/09,"Body shutting down- is impatient an option? 31 Male-

I was on Paxil from 2013-2019 with no issues. This past July the medication started to feel off- I also developed a scrotum rash and hives that I’ve since seen several dermatologist for and they can’t figure out. 

Anyways, I have been working with my psychologist for months (since October) to try to find a medication to reduce the anxiety/depression.

I have been on about 4 different meds and feel like it may not be an anxiety med I need but maybe a psychedelic (bipolar is in family history). 

I’m on the brink of taking fmla leave or walking away from work because I can’t address this issue with the travel requirements of my work. I am frustrated because every 4-6 weeks I go into my doctor and all we can do is switch medications or dosages. It’s just very transactional and I feel myself unraveling more everyday to the point where I am having extreme trouble functioning at work and completely unfunctional outside of work. I will spend the weekend hardly doing anything but sleeping and exhausted if I try anything else.

I can’t see any other option other than trying to get stabilized. Quality of life is horrible even compared to 6 months ago. Any help or tips for who to go to is appreciated!",5.7648285356695865,7.379729838297872,7.174793491864832,68.24411764705884,67.63829787234043,10.46558197747184,33.82352941176471,10.59048541779884,4.122209011264081,1012,47,165,29,17,346,153,235,0.099,0.853,0.048,-0.8953,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,1,6,6,4,1,0,11,0,22,10,3,0,1,32,34,14,0,2,8,0,4,1,0,2,7,0,1,1,8,13,0,1,5,2,1,5,5,3,0,0,4,6,19,1,33,27,2,27,0,0,2,0,6,14,0,7,9,115,27,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236747319227536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235059610110637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570628999831511,0.0,0.08834311011646324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19006303900063415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084987673280481,0.0,0.0,0.1407930265088191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12827402733631346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210802634906666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946413534404296,0.0,0.0,0.120653696003773,0.0,0.11820031392259545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647006093095294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627450956957195,0.0,0.09729823110743313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088657775961866,0.0,0.17517290475078048,0.08250008017207702,0.0,0.0,0.10554809290705654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033437117762496,0.0,0.13126171238303438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344883328238767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740488416302102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241065580689582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227834322321993,0.0,0.0,0.08156807131116503,0.05641847796629136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601679187577373,0.0,0.2565480546726269,0.3490066968636066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18435262732076507,0.0,0.0,0.08562814527374381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024025696508216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916744167474353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920238860421559,0.0,0.0,0.13046134072345705,0.0,0.19105515051325592,0.0,0.1155650023129126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817384728992991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682779350326036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352132838328845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528441658817173,0.0,0.0,0.09263237608775657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4203599113809373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ClaytonTheClayGod,2020/02/09,"I feel like I'm being monitored/watched I've been feeling like this for at least 2 or 3 years, but now It got even worse, I constantly feel like someone watches me all the time through a screen or something and I believe that everything I do is shared to everyone, now It got to the point where I believe they're watching my thoughts and that everyone can see my thoughts through their cellphone, I can't do anything private, I can't be naked, I can't look bad, I have no privacy at all, It's gotten to the point where I spend the entire day acting like I'm being recorded",8.626923076923076,5.851124683760687,8.159931623931623,78.23784615384616,62.84615384615386,11.41128205128205,42.2034188034188,9.3871,3.8134629059829055,456,22,95,6,5,145,73,117,0.063,0.774,0.163,0.8472,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,5,6,0,0,5,0,12,0,0,0,2,12,24,5,0,0,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,5,0,1,1,4,1,0,0,6,8,14,5,8,15,3,13,0,0,5,0,3,6,0,2,10,59,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357584702026636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13774530819565675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3717354644127618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827687409852427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639373948579307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896290819162333,0.0,0.0,0.3152769568624994,0.14826681945712225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502454521927697,0.35356957569391195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638874671398241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223892998928989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853551314280865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119050385730649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146187766834191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13978082788364168,0.12700403932714438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619397820913106,0.09619690428106477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16812126873336855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623700580044636
mentalhealth,scorched_skies,2020/02/09,"[Question] For anyone on lifetime SSD/SSI because of your illness. How do/did you feel about living more ""withdrawn"", however it may be, and how do your benefits affect your lifestyle and illness currently?",9.389714285714282,10.059796114285714,8.429285714285715,65.79821428571432,59.28571428571429,10.428571428571429,46.07142857142857,10.125756701596842,5.359857142857145,164,10,22,3,2,51,29,35,0.142,0.789,0.068,-0.4215,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,0,8,4,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,4,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,1,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3939170398685359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34342131915716595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848536442550649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4974605214036049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.63109634308006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jacobnguyen4767,2020/02/09,"How come internet trolls love to drive people to the point where they just want to get it over with and kill themselves So I'm being harassed online by a group of trolls who originated from yahoo answers. Those idiots have been stalking me and they recently found out my address and my cell number. They framed me with a crime and now I have a felony on my record and I'm awaiting trial now. I hate my life so much that I just want to kill myself. I posted on yahoo saying that I'm becoming suicidal and they went onto my post and replied me to just do it. They said "" just do it, no one will care or miss you or go to your funeral, your that hated by everyone"". I really am thinking about killing myself. How come internet trolls loves to do this to others and tell them to kill themselves ???",4.353337169159957,5.361012101265828,4.948527042577677,85.16730149597241,70.39240506329114,8.023935558112774,25.756041426927503,8.296473431620573,1.4986886075949368,624,18,126,9,11,200,94,158,0.252,0.67,0.078,-0.9895,0,0,0,0,0,3,14.0,0,3,6,0,12,12,8,0,4,0,9,3,0,3,0,27,28,14,6,2,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,10,13,0,0,3,0,0,5,1,9,0,1,4,2,24,3,21,22,1,18,0,1,0,2,17,7,0,2,4,92,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15815209463717858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600097010487706,0.0,0.0,0.2467065951341535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368328241683632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570103615939707,0.0,0.0,0.0748155906956769,0.0,0.08138331730309534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827588207172053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6337141064046191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114572039022177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584854579730201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526777477645348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703537891993508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927618736942644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353693835572896,0.0,0.27429020249699554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173697505522158,0.0,0.1413917812869492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13621508405690474,0.11387762818163705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15663651309664514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516227709310315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175616591910063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16892501381373914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13274694937513049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Unknownentityexe,2020/02/09,how do i cope with my fear of being alone at night and soul crushing loneliness? as the title says. i’m going through a break-up and i’m finding it incredibly difficult to be by myself. any advice or suggestions?,1.7221428571428559,4.336301214285714,3.9812380952380977,81.48042857142859,84.47619047619048,7.1695238095238105,25.06666666666667,8.238735603445708,2.1204323809523813,169,7,31,4,5,58,38,42,0.299,0.701,0.0,-0.9127,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,6,6,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,7,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854349885738455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4085132368056129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26822770539291585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4438463531882902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3605042664065813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22416514607983892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701482916800105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136686485940447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRA34667899,2020/02/09,"How to stop being so sensitive all the time? Im a 19 year old college freshman guy. I struggle to handle any sort of judgement from people. I wasn’t always like this, but now the slightest criticism makes me want to cry. I don’t know what changes, but I don’t want to be like this anymore. 

For example, I was out with friends, and one guy made a joke (in good spirit) about the drink I ordered. I don’t know why, but it made me want to cry. I just brushed it off there though. It was one of my favorite beverages. 

Please don’t tell me to just ignore it or suck it up. I’ve tried. Didn’t work. Is there medication that can make me less emotionally sensitive? Honestly I’d like something that would just make me not feel. Currently alcohol is the only thing that does that but that’s unhealthy and expensive to get underage.",2.404236947791162,4.37205560843374,3.5826265060240985,89.08787550200806,77.25301204819277,7.318232931726907,26.12690763052209,8.238735603445708,1.6287201606425703,645,25,137,12,15,209,103,166,0.145,0.672,0.183,0.6387,1,0,3,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,10,10,1,1,6,0,14,3,0,6,1,30,27,10,0,4,9,0,1,3,1,1,2,0,0,2,14,4,2,2,3,2,1,0,7,3,0,2,6,2,14,7,17,18,2,11,1,0,0,0,4,4,1,2,9,86,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15580370771897475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121307818578459,0.0,0.0,0.09914126732495764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445831458320676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422503906609694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32028392746843354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275806120759963,0.0,0.0,0.142817354541215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399258550798693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371511150352078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11263593346173233,0.0,0.07616854167910835,0.0,0.0,0.1222805854803796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887073280043839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747673725062342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16024323607738794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21367488083016506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758974523971988,0.2919451266572479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686670642002697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529806423111046,0.0,0.19758029669712213,0.11087882217707523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107147915398428,0.0,0.0,0.1600321356223828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223520953163378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188582219531488,0.0,0.15240992959676353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274256880253304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685548735228908,0.0,0.1432365882164137,0.0,0.08501052222810887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09898090957342023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579697326922107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155156209971575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613585856719487,0.0,0.0,0.10356405947471392,0.0,0.0,0.09388309749198734
mentalhealth,interiordivine,2020/02/09,"constant mood swings... I’m a 16 year old female so when I say mood swings the immediate thoughts following that is probably hormones or PMS or whatever? I have never ever had pms symptoms when I had periods, and for almost a year now I’ve been on birth control that completely stops my periods, if that even matters. The mood swings are a completely new thing, starting towards the end of January. It’s so frustrating. I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety years ago, but again the mood swings are very new. I’ll be very very depressed, often suicidal for anywhere from half a day-a couple days in a row. And seemingly out of nowhere I feel fine, sometimes even happy and motivated to improve and get better. But then pretty soon it’s back to feeling horrible. I have no idea where this is coming from or if I’m doing something to bring this on. Im not any more stressed than I usually am. No new medication or anything. (I haven’t taken antidepressants since last year because I hate them.) Idk if this is a place for advice I am mostly just venting I guess.",4.925735294117646,6.436571475490202,5.794392156862745,77.74276470588238,69.5392156862745,9.361568627450982,32.71764705882353,9.725611199111238,3.307008235294118,847,39,154,20,15,278,130,204,0.171,0.71,0.11900000000000001,-0.8917,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,3,14,12,2,1,10,0,16,5,0,2,2,34,30,19,1,3,11,0,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,9,8,0,2,6,0,0,3,5,5,0,1,6,3,13,3,17,23,2,38,0,2,0,0,2,7,0,12,28,101,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706325583886246,0.10619191785462552,0.0,0.1199583803893478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08146538179023173,0.0,0.0916436051409494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858189322914174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211572243537253,0.0,0.0730265241452538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105949818831371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319363869670024,0.2512076344849651,0.1294569078553232,0.13436139025200872,0.0,0.13255198537251126,0.0,0.15451700730834822,0.0,0.2063602228433826,0.12159040907570605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061036906017446,0.0,0.0,0.15824824433050555,0.10836233221718396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114490492965645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06258846084703701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196878989361913,0.0,0.0,0.12752505990835594,0.0,0.118273739571208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523509210575171,0.12940022726512518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764972153981227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206818576523224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239405336914308,0.34709914351616905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570574059276424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516131321151386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187559017943908,0.12916033980828942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526658022111527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905777089080858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909648160846546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922248064958868,0.11848129817371085,0.0,0.08479221894420948,0.0,0.0,0.1001548125001424,0.13722590282529376,0.0,0.0,0.1310373703663381,0.0,0.0,0.12451390360873855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958713327489296,0.0,0.0,0.0951046354310038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319383593240707,0.29653271562594125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085787618899622
mentalhealth,NoahMatthew1220,2020/02/09,"Depression I think?? So I think I have depression but I’m not sad?? I’m gonna list the signs of depression that I do have
Lack of interest or pleasure in anything- yup
Significant increase or decrease in eating- yup
Insomnia or over-sleeping- definitely 
Fatigue or low energy- yup
Lack of enjoyment in previously enjoyed hobbies- yerp
So I have all of these but I’m a happy person like I constantly make jokes and am laughing. Idk I’m not trying to belittle people with depression or anything like that I just wanna know.",2.6691287284144423,5.653709602040816,4.568367346938778,75.73652276295138,85.63265306122447,8.321507064364207,32.02825745682888,8.841846274778883,3.826247095761381,423,24,69,13,13,143,62,98,0.19699999999999998,0.41700000000000004,0.386,0.9836,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,16,0,0,2,3,5,3,0,1,1,21,14,10,0,3,10,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,2,1,0,3,1,0,1,2,7,0,0,0,0,7,9,10,13,4,6,0,7,0,0,1,4,0,5,3,43,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3361202656701888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206951440871168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.703596275683749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20897360614053226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21740177436221328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223695876385732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19954846457731606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13632206448166548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415842030615176,0.1783217735235623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20437292534011609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617188264753422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865566545143804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sssnnnoooo,2020/02/09,"Am I depressed or having depression? For a while now, probably over 2 years... I've started to see some habits developing. Such as being irritated easily, sleeping way too much, not remembering stuff. For today, it was the worst I've ever been irritated, I've yelled at my sibling twice (wasn't saying rude stuff to them or harmed them). I just yelled out of no where, but earlier than that I just thought because I didn't have my morning coffee, but then it just got worse and I did burst and started to cry to 'let it out'. And for sleeping, I've been sleeping for 12 hours everyday.. and still wake up feeling tired. Even if I slept for 8-9hrs I still feel SO tired, sometime I've slept for almost 16+ hrs. Not remembering stuff is probably the most saddest thing for me, like remembering a story... sometime my friends would pull up the previous convo and id be like ""woah how didnt i remember that."" or checking on something then ""rechecking"" if i have done it is just sad and exhausting for me, makes me feel like I'm dumb sometime to forget so easily.   
Also, idk if this is related to being depressed or having depression but ive started to have more nightmares that involves death or just so much blood... it makes me wake up and feel more so upset and anxious. Lastly, i have been hallucinating too, I've been hearing people calling me but no one really did.. or the worst one for me is when i hear iphone alarm go off, i go and look around but realize after a while it was me, makes me feel horrible and made me think if im going crazy.",4.195143540669856,5.422682342105265,5.247775119617227,82.05033492822969,70.97368421052632,8.422009569377991,28.620813397129183,8.841846274778883,2.1740513157894736,1208,45,240,22,22,398,156,304,0.268,0.67,0.062,-0.9974,0,0,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,2,0,22,17,2,2,7,0,29,11,8,5,1,58,54,37,1,5,22,0,5,3,1,1,3,5,0,0,14,13,0,0,12,0,1,4,7,13,0,3,17,12,27,4,30,32,8,34,0,5,2,0,8,11,1,13,21,171,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882465084242971,0.0,0.0,0.07093688267468902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021073183274913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896572915154147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054073383521727116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057711786222272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743762646241726,0.0,0.0,0.30560390499332085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077540644250767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585884245996908,0.08023821505777391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242580686482745,0.06337044648214192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685328052371384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123827702422166,0.0,0.07094501802455351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19995262831166327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735597330067074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581598191347744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230593137788423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070626663371892,0.0,0.13000947869782264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448936157130663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393425521254204,0.17763264253436897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041589202753487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021680449641152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0614964672729669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19127670862051155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056826314886683466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4019392074815216,0.0,0.0,0.07054130522292633,0.0,0.0,0.07068592822394529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663054064555097,0.0,0.0,0.06828898664203052,0.2631927817167877,0.0,0.18835630868211686,0.0,0.14167890891710272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046359729249027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05893126684227919,0.056838202635032274,0.0,0.07042139122116411,0.0,0.20390533508076192,0.0840814064291612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040942986781502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039736952933627,0.06301306607415252,0.0,0.0,0.05712273017796402
mentalhealth,PM_ALL_YOUR_FRIENDS,2020/02/09,"College is tearing me apart I'm a senior Computer Science Major at a University. I have been studying all day, and cannot comprehend the material. I have many assignments due Monday/Tuesday.

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I'm a crying in my room because the work load is unbearable, and it seems like no matter how hard I try, I can't get the material.

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I just want to give up

​

it was my dream to graduate college",4.947257383966246,6.662320708860762,6.4234810126582325,72.46070675105486,69.7594936708861,9.317299578059073,35.951476793248936,9.725611199111238,3.92317552742616,332,18,56,8,6,113,58,79,0.092,0.813,0.095,-0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,6,0,8,0,0,1,1,8,14,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,8,1,5,12,2,8,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,4,35,10,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4869065191957414,0.5460497863722569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131327772639834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16454211789038029,0.09660499775214987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826139303064096,0.14369644076989244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418636246724686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318197889742713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518680134790762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636719860535154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170056687300956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883526199275695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905210942551156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5460497863722569,0.0
mentalhealth,athenes_noctua,2020/02/09,I'm so tired of life! Like holy fuck I have to do this shit for another 3/4 of a century??! Why should I keep going?,-1.3362820512820512,0.4601651153846191,1.85923076923077,97.16910256410259,90.15384615384615,6.5435897435897425,16.358974358974358,7.793537801064563,0.167528205128205,87,2,23,2,3,31,23,26,0.371,0.5529999999999999,0.077,-0.8902,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,2,7,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,12,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3965061483025175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3495785069901775,0.0,0.0,0.21490209242677732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3361026014712804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670870108540745,0.18473702264541134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3881488030219272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43460905560456375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34120684395238826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,schmemms,2020/02/09,"Skeptical about an upcoming therapy session. I have a therapist session scheduled and I'm skeptical about the therapist and I'm not sure if I should go through with it. I was given his number to call through a work assistance program, called and left a message, and it took three days to get a response. When he did respond he seemed distant and agitated with me, despite not knowing me, and tentatively scheduled me in on Monday because someone else had canceled. I asked him where his office was located and he said he'd email me, but it's been a day and half since then and I still have no email. 

I looked up reviews of the therepist and some are really positive and some are pretty negative. I like to think I have a pretty good sense for people and he seems to be giving out some red flags. 

I'm scared of going to therapy as it is, should I seek help elsewhere? I already don't feel comfortable going into this session, but I really need to talk to someone. I dont know what to do about this and this is giving me way too much anxiety.",5.4324690431519675,6.014426663414638,6.2165853658536605,78.57947467166981,67.73170731707317,9.624765478424015,33.81801125703565,9.661875296680813,3.2028348968105065,826,37,157,17,13,272,121,205,0.11,0.743,0.146,0.8969,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,2,1,9,0,19,0,0,0,1,35,40,19,0,4,5,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,8,17,0,0,6,0,0,4,6,3,0,2,8,4,21,4,24,28,4,20,0,0,2,0,20,7,0,6,9,111,29,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14977266655383414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382700330392032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12688180361403742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273490716609902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27717479283288066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17505899951929316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15906524181664838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337836444520726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686251507949693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090917387152104,0.2603939313802316,0.23140192077183505,0.11383722342314287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097163494853988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14917858788234198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746241373306754,0.0,0.0,0.06630694222204726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397234670894504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977132941520672,0.10063618668762228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409258639840068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761562530143992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738940521394286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291027577206984,0.0,0.13588145751411926,0.0,0.0,0.2471125294816368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227068934645837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22999371955110515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083878112781752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791643397975042,0.0,0.0,0.10908824960310584,0.0,0.0,0.310420004495563,0.3151675415089676,0.0,0.0869652149029627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15079220091235548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772985273597643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880727506705876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DoublyBubblyMe,2020/02/09,"I can’t stop feeling lonely Hey y’all. I’m a college freshman right now, second semester, and I feel like I’ve managed  this far without finding my “people”. Don’t get me wrong, I have friends. I’m close with my roommate, a friend from band, and this really cool senior from my major. I love them all to death but I can’t help feeling like I’m suffocating whenever I have a moment to myself. In high school I always had the same friends I’d had since elementary school, so I was my genuine self around them. I never felt uncomfortable or like I wasn’t wanted, even when they hung out without me. I was an extrovert and always acting like a goofball. Now.... I don’t know, it’s like my personality is flipped. I rarely feel comfortable starting conversations and even more rarely know how to continue them - something I could do even with total strangers before college. I feel like the person that I am as a result is not who I really am. I go back to normal when I’m at home, but I’m a different person with each of my friends here. I don’t know how to feel more connected with my current friends without pushing them away and I don’t know how to make friends with my real personality - which is too spontaneous, loud, and obnoxious for everyone I can imagine. How do I feel comfortable - or at least feel less lonely - again?",5.607461538461538,5.9883035538461575,6.359807692307693,78.40894230769231,67.30769230769229,9.423076923076923,32.403846153846146,9.354420925462401,2.7980769230769225,1044,42,203,19,16,344,135,260,0.084,0.718,0.198,0.9822,2,4,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,5,0,18,19,0,0,9,1,22,1,0,6,3,53,46,18,1,3,8,0,9,6,6,0,0,1,1,5,6,15,0,1,15,1,0,3,12,3,0,1,6,11,39,16,25,39,9,26,0,2,0,1,23,10,0,2,19,138,45,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15877845710591376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493562602748109,0.0,0.0,0.08964136122520892,0.07336483079151421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118735868015492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617756800658163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996837274098212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18905332382059584,0.0,0.0,0.0911688781808173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3859395645582173,0.20448396797321192,0.0916090993418876,0.0,0.08720352273041422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4422837688282517,0.0,0.049848079330493636,0.0,0.05422401961116706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395168675855636,0.1008064943478534,0.09570457032136394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20974059285033075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27967667952548697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611175488294734,0.0,0.0636872892358093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358650523883177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934820905751343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614566853785564,0.3332352810418308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085981045607239,0.1222448948827571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148009636348674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19312115956118994,0.0,0.0,0.09953402166333997,0.0,0.0,0.07892460063308049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345170991952947,0.0,0.0,0.06753208497760392,0.0,0.0,0.07976749981181501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05627561990216681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759171234153337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431646883976556,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,everywindthatblows,2020/02/09,"I just realized that throughout my whole life I was only valued as a tool I just came to the realization that I was never really valued as a human being by anyone I cared about. People would only talk to me or contact me when they needed something from me. I never had a friend who enjoyed just being my friend. I always had to offer something material: my knowledge of the subject matter of their homework, my abilities as a coder, or money. I would not call it conditional love, because there was no love. I was just an object that was only ever meant to be used and then promptly discarded. I know that reality forced me to become obsessed with my professional career because I was only acknowledged when I was successful. Every small mistake stood between me and being accepted. What fucks with me the most is the fact that I never met someone who loved me unconditionally.",7.910340831629178,7.8885817791411075,8.630388548057264,65.44486025903208,62.49693251533742,10.4346284935242,34.67552828902522,9.994966539143718,3.6380857532379007,702,27,110,13,9,237,96,163,0.111,0.705,0.184,0.9342,0,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,1,9,12,1,1,9,0,16,5,0,1,5,30,28,10,0,4,7,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,1,9,5,0,0,6,0,1,1,5,3,0,0,13,0,27,9,16,9,2,9,0,0,0,4,15,1,1,3,7,97,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12547629151937376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054416992079671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18385052572621907,0.16654490886672102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398195612305446,0.17247311742707475,0.15374894854445667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640572367528805,0.1270540976701871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330128327789545,0.1394106269941779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287481895097146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651332075805664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083041436180497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181505161090312,0.3489149076595611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4587557035597708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045445753722558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660527219276482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277709364207926,0.2321838449484741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120598624604499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13024134063660694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16836095114192812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142456153256802,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,noturlittlesister420,2020/02/09,"Advice?? I’m a highly sensitive person, ever since I was little. It’s just how I was born. Recently though I’ve been more irritated/more angry in general due to events. The beginning of today was really good I got to spend time with a family member I haven’t seen in awhile and it was really nice and I was happy? But like 30 minutes after I got more bad news and since I’ve felt numb. I’ve never felt like this before and I don’t like it. I was even concerned before this bc I’ve never been like this but now I’m completely numb. I don’t know what to do.",-0.2065266106442607,2.01269042016807,2.774588235294118,89.30031372549021,90.1764705882353,6.198543417366947,14.656022408963587,7.554174236665415,0.203806274509804,436,8,94,9,15,154,67,119,0.087,0.785,0.128,0.371,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,0,3,0,12,2,0,1,3,17,21,8,0,0,3,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,13,3,9,7,8,8,2,16,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,16,55,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17058604254899432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575717056360107,0.0,0.0,0.29708939243796645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18303145559128714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530066179701087,0.15790694767411512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456738004244054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352257310462703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641953917948286,0.2792363025741796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18583111446630385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844409070973112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959381274259801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3411408547260477,0.1749632154560028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692755434890329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15242623481205175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236657414391208,0.0,0.17236505550737288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888092682367614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715123881513781,0.0,0.10179213193286588,0.0,0.1654702592251797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zoeoliviaxo,2020/02/09,"It’s painful how much no one gives a shit I feel so isolated and alone. I’m 22 f and I don’t fit in anywhere, with anyone. I have friends and plenty of them but I look at them like I’m a different species. I don’t understand them and know they don’t really understand me. Kinda feel like I watch the world from an outsiders perspective and I struggle to make sense of it. Why are people so selfish? So stuck in their own lives with out the ability to look beyond themselves. I have mental health stuff, BPD and ADHD, last year I was diagnosed with a rare brain condition 1:100000 and had brain surgery. But I find myself just continuously getting more and more miserable and feeling more isolated. In theory I have plenty of supports, professional and personal but it all feels so superficial.  I know they wanna help but I also know if I died tonight in 2 months they would be ok. I have a good life in theory so why do I feel like this, why do I feel as though everything would be better for me and them if I wasn’t around? Just need to vent. Maybe someone here is from my species too.",2.6179493087557617,4.720700875576039,3.7585506912442415,87.44068317972351,77.11059907834101,7.6579723502304144,25.135714285714286,8.548686976883017,1.7147421198156685,858,31,178,18,20,278,124,217,0.147,0.6970000000000001,0.155,0.2097,1,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,8,1,14,13,1,2,7,1,18,7,3,2,1,44,39,26,1,6,8,0,6,3,1,2,4,0,0,1,5,16,0,0,12,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,4,9,30,8,23,31,6,16,0,1,3,0,12,11,1,3,8,120,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410905437404134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419105931372347,0.0,0.09589234061871574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384417214035879,0.0,0.0,0.10674571973694448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605104537206134,0.0,0.0,0.15102300950589226,0.2677194297705924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12170657894392875,0.12444811188692692,0.125280894791779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776777730362662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3637819474633679,0.171328093654555,0.0,0.0,0.10959597559736886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264251339452577,0.0,0.0626482590934952,0.1150290264912702,0.0,0.1005751932806177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745919719823678,0.0,0.0,0.08037344458054588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19769893614445727,0.09774301800430726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469629442584864,0.17574656151899945,0.0,0.105883120982825,0.0,0.20138914942240868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004115405438704,0.0,0.12046616041181207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208415266766162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571137425926254,0.0,0.08814797513550912,0.08891207658420676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125442174932725,0.0,0.12759316922491742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313080536158336,0.1047011765859122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681770241032285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230863500125332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159973206302728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253564338677408,0.13726877274075586,0.0,0.1360729535079085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11781140471423045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24966200702590816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3246015808454491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17036188136776664,0.0,0.0,0.07721839602701899
mentalhealth,viajata,2020/02/09,"I need help I've been to therapy, I've to get help but I know I need something more. 
I need to get out of whatever mental state I'm in. I am always happy for days or whenever I am with my boyfriend but whenever I am home for too long, all these feelings of self hate and bad thoughts come back. I've been thinking of killing myself again and I need to get out of this mental state. I've tried before and I ended up in the hospital with no memories after a certain point. This was years ago. I am starting to feel the same way again. 

I love my family but they are toxic. They are the reason why I tried to end my life years ago. I thought maybe things would change, nothing has. I started to look for jobs that are reasonable and even transferring to another university.

I can't even get myself to shower more than once a week, I lost over 25lbs and I've stopped getting my period for a few months. I'm not pregnant. My face looks sickly and I can't even look in the mirror without crying anymore. Everytime I look at myself I just can't see the girl I once was. I miss who I was. 


I love my boyfriend and I want to be better for him but it is hard when some days I just hide away from the world. He knows that i was depressed for a while but he thinks I'm better now. We talked about a future together and I'm trying to hard to hold onto him because he's the reason why I wake up in the morning, go to school and try to finish up my degree. 

I don't need any encouragement to stay strong, I really just needed to get it off my chest. To vent I guess

I love my family, i do, but I can't continue to fight with them every other time I see them and hear that I'm stupid, worthless, and a waste of resources. I'm tired of hearing that why should they take care of me because I'll just abandon them in the future. I can't stand when they say that they regret having me. I finished high school just for them, I finished college just for them, I am in university..  just for them. Yet I feel like I'll never be enough.  
I felt like I needed to speak to say something somewhere because we fought over a can of butane. Am I really a POS because i didn't store a can of butane the way you wanted? I'm thankful for my boyfriend because without him, I think I wouldn't have made it to 22.",2.121408653846153,3.5139291312500016,3.6404166666666704,90.88394230769232,76.4375,6.58974358974359,22.93269230769231,7.2200825789825185,0.6694086538461539,1773,51,396,20,39,587,214,480,0.131,0.7390000000000001,0.13,0.3091,2,0,2,0,1,2,43.0,2,1,11,4,19,25,5,0,19,0,34,9,3,4,3,73,91,21,1,13,17,0,6,2,0,3,3,5,2,2,14,19,0,3,14,0,1,2,13,12,0,0,13,17,77,13,66,73,7,60,0,6,6,3,37,20,0,3,34,257,91,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12523219073116829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058776259189543115,0.0,0.0,0.04803608615633153,0.07406983046427575,0.0,0.0,0.07005365815204051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636648292862271,0.054316062627093084,0.05897956320070141,0.21530055641127915,0.0,0.06010751488177118,0.0,0.0,0.1249466832116832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201988471561907,0.0,0.07472536375553937,0.06084815918476945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759224160375885,0.09111099847042416,0.0,0.06084018282311116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251281442803301,0.07298766911896748,0.0,0.13996668520480415,0.0,0.059515343379457526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331819512474923,0.0,0.10714969283982437,0.050463616289719335,0.06782330884406662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22143182526649274,0.0,0.04014505606184178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781543548890386,0.0,0.0,0.07519518880575174,0.12655508255247624,0.06974014506804048,0.0,0.0,0.15922773581979016,0.0,0.094693977635065,0.07463265165533549,0.07085541367970417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009705836752443,0.0,0.07815019457257304,0.0,0.07764131024220866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049893525479654886,0.06902006441212002,0.0,0.0,0.06251217795140282,0.2372716475059008,0.0,0.07710943863978388,0.0,0.1912599574219445,0.06683913849025372,0.0,0.0,0.07096510519955625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423724575227716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05638237094868573,0.0,0.0,0.3666389293655439,0.05448018054344927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677788176069362,0.0,0.0,0.15045377761265133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06677549738756669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050469134404722,0.21788208736403772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234793368069096,0.0,0.14297833013683872,0.11257826816735564,0.0,0.0736905693895192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876076815044458,0.0,0.0,0.09999551331088133,0.07529043326330183,0.0,0.05905631443078744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05311079026217149,0.056775940511612714,0.0,0.06503374143973509,0.08078041298204519,0.0,0.0469285763709096,0.13578543663156314,0.0,0.11215695209515332,0.04118943483503548,0.08118769205643775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918335574434985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332793961376192,0.1121379017908168,0.05666133503321943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19121872278400326,0.0,0.0,0.13618452323478578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050179024515802716,0.0,0.0,0.09097677851880948
mentalhealth,_YouMadeMeDoItReddit,2020/02/09,"Why is 26-29 such a difficult time for blokes? Like you've got the infamous 27 club where so many people killed themselves, saying they did it just to fit into the mould is beyond foolish and I'd never suggest that but around that age range seems fucking awful for men. 

I'm 28 and if I had access to a firearm I would have blown my brains out either now or a year ago. 

I've always felt the same though, I've always been as depressed as I am right now as I was when I was 18 but why is it now that I'm 28 that I have the overwhelming desire to off myself. 

There has to be some scientific reason why men are more likely to kill themselves at my age than before. 

I'm not going to do it, I've got this far but the thought has never been so overbearing as it is now.",3.170094235033257,3.6187750670731735,4.47088691796009,89.56324833702885,72.71951219512195,7.183148558758315,22.83592017738359,6.980632752743323,0.5241414634146335,597,13,136,5,11,198,102,164,0.133,0.825,0.042,-0.9514,0,0,0,1,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,14,8,3,1,8,1,19,2,1,1,2,23,29,15,2,3,8,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,0,2,9,5,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,6,0,0,10,3,10,2,19,17,4,23,0,2,0,1,5,10,1,4,14,91,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15007768564641852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.281748802719787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071635899280367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406514284779248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889991363873316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582119467985974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625582873663881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15651872065393216,0.0,0.0,0.09621930381846212,0.0,0.2708155783585469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37461934557853255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542666018473914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716475738784496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611551985738748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737400183457625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17407259919615986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445845992859835,0.0,0.13463725081796402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541279052842436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634021495300375,0.13440837935774896,0.09872246132619304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4583112888169718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202686277922356,0.0,0.0,0.10902615603826188
mentalhealth,MuhammadTheProfit,2020/02/09,"Grandmother truly despises loving husband? Any advice on this? My grandmother has four children, all of which have moved far from home and don't want to deal with her. My grandmother is very controlling currently. Her relationship with her husband, my grandfather, in the past, has been less than ideal. However, that was a time when I was not around, my mother has confirmed that he was a less than ideal husband. In recent years (the past 20 or so) he has completely changed. As my grandmother has grown more and more immobile, he has taken more time to care for her and his grandchildren.

She can no longer leave home. She can't walk up steps, she can hardly leave her chair. She has it in her head that her husband is a terrible human being that is mistreating her and is always mean. I lived with them and am aware that this is all in her head. My grandfather does everything he can for her, he cleans up her incontinence messes, he cooks and cleans for her, and he drives at odd hours to pick up candy she likes, and gets random items such as nail polish for her. I get that in her mind she feels trapped, and she can't let go of the past. But this seriously weighs on my grandfather. My grandfather loves her, and has said he is trying to make her last years alive as comfortable as possible. Yet she continues to verbally abuse him, she calls her friends and tells them he mistreats her.

My brother has been living with them for about a year now to help care for them. My other brother is also witness to this as well. My grandmother has convinced herself that my grandfather is SO abusive, that she called social welfare (I think? My brother was a little unclear). My brother is not the type to face a person, but he was so genuinely taken aback by her inability to see what was going on that he lost it.

I'm unsure how to follow this up. I don't know how to get her the mental help she needs. I don't know if anything can be done. On one hand, my grandfather is being abused every day by a woman who genuinely hates his every being. But he loves her dearly and will do everything he can to make sure she is okay. But on the other, the hatred my grandmother has been harvesting for years, and her inability to move and get out, is leading to quick mental degredation. I believe alzheimers is at play as well.

As of right now, I don't know what to do. I don't know what social welfare will do. And I don't know what I CAN do. I need any kind of advice or assistance I can get. Or who I can call or talk to to possibly help this situation seeing as though the daughters of my grandmother hate her for who she is as a human being.",4.5996658070062315,5.6697368878143175,5.257254996776275,82.94938131313133,69.87040618955513,8.839222007307113,27.12706855791962,9.150863307647796,2.0668160756501184,2069,66,413,40,36,668,213,517,0.09300000000000001,0.799,0.10800000000000001,0.7625,2,1,0,0,2,0,60.0,0,0,4,5,17,25,3,0,16,1,65,9,4,7,3,58,100,41,0,6,11,10,3,1,1,2,0,1,4,5,27,21,2,1,8,2,0,10,11,7,2,2,14,6,75,18,67,78,8,51,0,1,2,3,92,21,0,7,21,302,102,2,0.0,0.2803251961096418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413127587936035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306804414595478,0.0656217190366221,0.0,0.0,0.10726135323462607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489889962964036,0.07020627217276795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885347101247844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415889218368329,0.0,0.1608155641418937,0.0,0.08342835853949328,0.0,0.0826881008399004,0.0,0.08845342785003815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05086118464507503,0.08130600672877976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690149998432002,0.08070593357108159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289376341629025,0.0,0.1417569514445662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03987634426637267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609306445839095,0.0,0.2060176623431284,0.0,0.08964121316752012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706472492842196,0.15572505866594585,0.16187579759155588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15858396775786834,0.0,0.1582153785499979,0.0,0.07766580899537254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212541262597718,0.21670978710635053,0.06428522794083677,0.0,0.16701258625452128,0.0,0.08064446325622537,0.0,0.038529291734404,0.07904311286910769,0.13927788821024842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609009806448832,0.0,0.21353531786405455,0.0,0.1052855526275474,0.0,0.0,0.08590674020618658,0.0,0.0,0.15895406640262838,0.0,0.07963082990974638,0.0,0.0,0.1676413160595381,0.0,0.11695429968526225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05344073807017299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22585573953383195,0.0,0.06886158356807197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17781612041615227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786934243092555,0.08467113598469339,0.0,0.0673499930418769,0.0750183562873288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568985480147798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864718781401043,0.0,0.16078518871017988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432901348286998,0.0,0.0,0.06338843042525348,0.06893119335286882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050533292947224265,0.07748413299199265,0.0,0.0919732408047782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05354393075509208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507160804057187,0.046516422758389256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14181761028753542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031450344454873
mentalhealth,PerfectWhine,2020/02/09,"Difficult time connecting with others Mainly because of a feeling of general sadness on a daily basis. Tried anti-depressants before and it screwed me up even worse for years after only taking them for 6 months. When you start feeling like this, it creates a downward spiral. People don't want to be with you when you're down, and the inability to connect with people makes it worse. My last relationship ended 3 years ago and that started it all. Only been with one person since and it was short lived. No friends either and a lot of things going on in my family that make it worse (I moved far away because of their negativity... and of course feel bad for it). Even my interests no longer interest me.... kinda sucks. Anyway.

I know other people have been in similar positions, and I want to know what you did to ""fix"" yourself, or at least make your situation better. How did you end up making friends... or getting into a relationship? Anything to live a ""normal"" healthy life",4.315310773480661,6.66244733701658,5.250604281767959,77.567177140884,72.86740331491713,7.618922651933701,27.33459944751381,8.472884824447931,2.2425825966850828,772,29,130,14,16,252,119,181,0.165,0.728,0.106,-0.8968,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,5,2,1,6,11,2,0,7,0,8,2,0,5,1,32,25,12,0,3,3,0,3,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,14,12,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,5,0,1,5,3,15,6,28,19,5,28,0,1,0,1,12,13,2,4,14,96,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971358274862364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185118527681157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162848717093051,0.0,0.10334178696256467,0.15089663623220226,0.0,0.10531814175401208,0.0,0.0,0.10946345494457024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660189514585404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21924485919361894,0.0,0.0,0.1634962641219788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166782194218874,0.0,0.1877436883158485,0.08842046296997272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912469519812015,0.0,0.06466409513058136,0.0,0.07034066727530007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13604020286215515,0.10088809978180076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742157115311547,0.060467189018915776,0.0,0.2185802544884176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522381669468092,0.0,0.0,0.330466568426755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987910837385463,0.1315466582597524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212671557088104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386894917443008,0.18826351528249816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574171278164736,0.10807015136575758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657627666413149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238283905872844,0.13912132874113453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520840224978992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930587422970523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222649810538632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217058874013596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403089794907627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600410237511613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37839297537397387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15940611211782307
mentalhealth,DaveSantan999,2020/02/09,"Am I a sociopath with anxiety and depression? Alright I’m hella confused if I am a bit of sociopath or not really. I’ll be 100% honest with the things I say.

So I know for a fact that my dad is a sociopath. He manipulates, lies he’s selfish, been in trouble, likes for people to think he’s this amazing caring passionate person and plays this image like he’s very passionate about being a Christian and he watches a lot of like religious things and tries to look good in front of the older people in the church. Now he’s got this different side to him, he’s done shady shit and is friends with shady people. We’re from Poland but now live in UK, but back in Poland he worked for some Ukrainian or Russian mafia. What he was doing is transporting huge amounts of cigarettes from Ukrainian or Russia and transporting it to Germany for profit. Eventually he had a crash because he fell asleep whilst driving and he got found out and went to prison for a year in Germany. He lied the whole family it was just transporting vegetables. And when my family found out he said he was just doing it for us his family. Which he sometimes says that he’d give away anything for us and I guess he does kinda care about us but yeah he’s kinda selfish as well.  Oh yeah also he has strong options about certain things and then he talks very loudly, fast and enthusiastically and I seem to do the same. 

Now I suffered from anxiety and depression my whole life nearly and I’m not very social and charismatic. However, I don’t seem to care about many people and don’t care if something happens unless they’re my family, elderly and poor people but apart from that I do lack some kind of empathy probably. I seem to like manipulation and I often manipulate my friends to do stupid things so that either lose money or like for example get addicted from something like cigarettes as it’s stupid and they’ll end up losing money. Not sure why I enjoy this and I know it’s kinda fucked up but can’t help it. 

I had one gf before and she was I knew she was interested so long story short we got together and she really loved me a lot. However I never actually loved her but kinda faked it as I wanted a gf and I want to be truly in love but I used to hate meeting up with her and I used to be so happy when like  I got away from meeting her but she was upset about it. Eventually it ended as she kinda found away I didn’t care much about her and I wasn’t sad about it or anything however she went through bad depression because of it which I don’t care that much about. But I’d love to be truly in love with a girl but not sure if that’s kinda impossible. 

Now I wanna know if I’m a sociopath even though I do suffer from bad anxiety, social anxiety and depression. Or am I just fucked up.
I never been in trouble but I’ve got friends that are into drugs a lot but I haven’t been too reckless with them I only smoke weed and I’ve tried mdma and ketamine once.",1.9291211677217817,4.248688241146713,3.622896635612197,86.40294473778786,80.58516020236088,6.7890304923561775,22.53750034556161,7.925487318751,1.2405887761590133,2329,76,467,43,61,775,239,593,0.187,0.615,0.198,0.7275,4,0,6,0,0,0,34.0,4,0,2,4,28,62,6,2,18,3,40,15,2,5,6,112,85,65,0,8,31,1,0,7,5,1,3,4,0,2,29,39,1,0,11,1,4,8,13,24,1,1,26,6,55,38,75,52,14,49,2,9,2,9,62,24,3,28,24,306,84,2,0.0,0.0,0.05781708941541615,0.06458860512708002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047380266600813736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18129693954895565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751141669894456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16699514910226962,0.045557730231664206,0.09893850546297403,0.07223354708203522,0.0,0.05041532495975815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468301002370172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3624411255708129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041194079423476,0.0,0.0,0.06190110864875961,0.0,0.0,0.05184795463861997,0.060630842459868425,0.0,0.0,0.06870838044455124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495153672402928,0.0,0.0,0.039132466392486485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234133739890575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19488573309314652,0.13732359503003055,0.10954686203852276,0.03095441407285163,0.05683567537118525,0.0,0.049694057318004164,0.2369285018780689,0.0,0.06526788663239083,0.0,0.05239243742432473,0.0630701483251978,0.0,0.05849471706261184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039712402547286925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169723506750311,0.09768275798446237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04184831639425538,0.20261761678613546,0.0,0.05231669670719581,0.0524322419844042,0.04975304350993446,0.1325657693405696,0.0,0.15111051592304442,0.26736626094599203,0.0,0.0,0.060067744664501474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710757366636188,0.0,0.09139076906995074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309673677812756,0.04014769209029705,0.04506045275277548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20537405257596927,0.05173269969271334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387890972406432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591103098285835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056358014093837276,0.09423210385939833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16181030907278274,0.0,0.0,0.060816787252105785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079088878863067,0.0,0.09122336000686118,0.058597369449957776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168028191404587,0.0,0.0,0.04762095881719652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574458323417226,0.037963455573722237,0.05821044442090876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045043249353702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21380262357387134,0.10234176893147807,0.0,0.14665636990284106,0.06989151293508146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0532706878349003,0.10984619648543656,0.05346172363809297,0.1322956096323239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043132942309799874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038153497627038915
mentalhealth,crazygurl3,2020/02/09,"Getting told to ""Grow-up"" or ""Stop being offended"" when your sensitive and someone says something that you don't like or hurts you! People can be so inconsiderate of people feelings that say shit like this. It's so fucked up! Just because I don't feel and react to everything ""exactly like that person will"" doesn't mean something is wrong with me.",5.214307692307692,7.070921815384616,5.455384615384617,79.1046153846154,69.30769230769229,8.276923076923078,29.92307692307693,8.841846274778883,2.516907692307692,278,11,49,5,5,88,50,65,0.345,0.622,0.032,-0.9739,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,0,0,4,8,3,0,0,0,8,2,1,1,1,12,14,7,0,0,3,0,2,3,0,1,0,2,0,1,5,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,4,5,3,5,10,0,3,0,1,0,1,7,1,2,2,5,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639545049474033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20109137555433368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262686616462341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20685255261049665,0.11689973489665068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23952817252713896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3279377072538974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24372849982184105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102390792379795,0.1953691924303031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3558687279297777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22967536359450866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895819918317862,0.34450616884835755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870643705155864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21380197257957306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24463465225757486,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway294743883,2020/02/09,"My (32f) bipolar fiancé (35m) just stopped his medication cold turkey do absolutely no reason other than “it makes him feel less”. He’s not doing well at all, but can’t see it because he’s on a high. How can I help? He’s trying to treat his mental health with healthy eating and exercise. This is not going to work. The last time he went off his meds, he literally gambled away our savings. He’s also struggling to keep a job at the moment. What do I do? I am very scared for him.",1.1706060606060618,3.245175000000004,3.2891818181818198,89.11377272727276,81.82828282828281,5.576161616161617,21.011111111111113,6.742157984588678,0.3938153535353535,371,11,79,4,10,126,77,99,0.125,0.772,0.10300000000000001,0.1071,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,1,4,5,0,2,4,0,8,5,0,3,1,14,14,4,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,2,1,2,2,1,1,2,4,2,1,0,1,3,10,3,11,13,2,12,0,0,1,0,13,6,0,0,4,49,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649532933852558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20735681718202245,0.0,0.0,0.1345379057165831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258332694909316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159357499373623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543004666271412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345959316623067,0.0,0.0,0.14793191489317473,0.2331838063763149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190127045385975,0.1961701001136897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17990160675924366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732031520260436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451501956253258,0.22233407075811776,0.2224157311308441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22691843916339866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209612284082826,0.0,0.17587093922208774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845167749515841,0.0,0.2307256756633158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869312538537028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498421874448652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821022840843056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843762536678167,0.20459298792705125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606737024602771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,a-huge-fucking-moth,2020/02/09,"not ok unless i'm sick i have no idea where to post this or even where to start but i need help. this is also all over the place, i apologize in advance

i don't know when it started or why but unless something's wrong with my physical health or seriously wrong with my mental health (hallucinations, etc) i feel empty/bored/unhappy. 

i kind of feel like it's almost a form of self harm; i actively seek out ways to worsen my health whether it be drugs, purposefully dehydrating myself, starving myself, staying awake for days, or pretty much anything you can think of that would be detrimental to one's health. 

i have ADHD, GAD, and MDD. i'm suspecting they have at least some connection to whatever this is, but i honestly have no clue

this is obviously unhealthy but i have no idea how to stop it. i don't like drawing attention to my unhealthy behaviors and i'm very good at hiding it, so getting professional help is kind of out of the question",4.947683946488294,6.20339716304348,5.834347826086957,78.44275919732442,69.21739130434783,9.357190635451506,29.914715719063548,9.661875296680813,2.7643491638795985,754,29,144,17,13,248,111,184,0.23399999999999999,0.625,0.14,-0.9615,0,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,1,1,7,11,0,0,3,1,15,6,0,1,2,35,26,17,0,2,12,0,2,2,0,1,6,0,0,1,10,6,0,1,9,0,0,1,6,4,0,1,0,2,19,7,23,23,6,18,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,7,7,99,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452727784394826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287535507059456,0.0,0.0,0.10282478381569342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058097712504088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292298241621228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149111114655823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14339985778106504,0.08492538530615197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002706946360665,0.09185704550497828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671773538549013,0.0,0.0,0.10784617874144033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5466949419596328,0.0,0.0,0.1723679286623701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903006564801419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677910156686653,0.07066379594200464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563465846486013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957764693519502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452054698653192,0.0953398884038824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712863088475989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433795483647912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314338375689605,0.13081132747086407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440381924101714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413620511932742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989865923578992,0.0,0.0,0.1820181170480752,0.1370483778778572,0.0,0.10749801462663504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238839483857248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609135133201217,0.0,0.10206022779356716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160227784663171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133901367434376,0.2811624613932069,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnxiousDreamer,2020/02/09,"My new dr dropped the ball and now I’m in mental crisis with no real solution I went to my new dr because I’m having a mental crisis and want to get it together and I feel like she didn’t look at my chart AT ALL and she prejudged me.
Every single aspect of my life is affected by depression and anxiety. I’m getting worse. I’m crying at work, I’m struggling to go to work, I panic about going to the store, I can’t bring myself to do adult things, I’m snappy with my children, I think about being a burden and ending things, I’m coping with this using alcohol, smoking, thc, and I am angry. I also can’t seem to relate or connect with people.
in a nutshell.
The part about my internal dialogue should have been a red flag but instead she wanted to put me on Wellbutrin , even though I said I had severe side affects with that. The only other offer was to talk to the mediator who deals with the patients medications in between dr visits , on Monday, about this whole thing.
Ok so what the fuck am I supposed to do right NOW?! 
She suggested I just stop smoking. She also suggested I get a gym membership instead of drinking. I don’t deny these are good ideas but you gotta get me in a better place before you start suggesting other coping mechanisms.

I’m considering a crisis center, but I hate the idea of being so extreme. I mean, I feel like most of the people around me aren’t taking mental health seriously. Like I should just get over it. I feel guilty. I feel inadequate. I wish I could just flip a fucking switch and be a good mom/wife/coworker but I’m screaming inside.",3.6129994742376472,4.977746066246058,5.306991324921139,80.53958267613041,72.56466876971609,7.680809674027341,25.826629863301786,8.212053250817874,1.7056730809674019,1241,40,235,19,24,423,172,317,0.18899999999999997,0.723,0.08800000000000001,-0.9836,1,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,0,2,0,3,18,16,3,2,18,1,22,10,0,3,1,45,59,18,0,6,8,0,4,3,0,3,7,2,0,2,13,15,2,1,9,3,1,6,6,9,0,0,6,8,39,7,38,46,5,30,0,1,2,2,18,15,2,3,11,162,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219129296517064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16790433664239462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030912591398576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345412337525376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399460511862129,0.0,0.08932992890581973,0.0,0.0,0.09284594738504638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381768842924005,0.0,0.11531518878696854,0.0,0.10822938391148336,0.09041879733167646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10284006650692007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298078829797787,0.0,0.0,0.0693380523390554,0.0,0.08844986194071926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21232341108515285,0.14999493039624268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19410394370299075,0.2742376063881674,0.0,0.11932468048224193,0.17610385773779755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364564585748576,0.0,0.11158843248824188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23701843730845096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415021387467055,0.15386322639865813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08815644534946822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143535876429701,0.0,0.10575592794312087,0.31738431210320395,0.0,0.0,0.12295086821239253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20277995231930665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984173550567136,0.0,0.12317097101440165,0.0,0.11368270387045926,0.0,0.14555930785216886,0.0,0.10968136452951358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055335188639424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11948979640949355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896520262971526,0.09985966362994204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556950799674556,0.0,0.11859709518099718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430511902323687,0.0,0.0,0.08776766731944659,0.0,0.10974749774911227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893161325307947,0.0843786461549675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20923139473211025,0.06726670491813333,0.1031419487198897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066869002671428,0.0,0.0,0.12383940570837408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731716427942493,0.0,0.11720600246493247,0.12072138804422758,0.0,0.0,0.15285283485165618,0.0,0.10698320670959176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,funkynchunki,2020/02/09,"Trying to get an ESA, want it to be legit I went on a telemedicine call earlier today and asked a family doctor whom I had seen before if he could write me an ESA letter. He asked me what exactly it needs to say which makes me nervous... and after reading it I'm not sure it is good enough to get approved by my University since I live in uni housing and they see these all the time. Do you think this is good enough??? He said if I had issues I could get back to him. If ya'll have suggestions for what a better one would say I would really appreciate it.

[https://imgur.com/a/tGJ0Wj0](https://imgur.com/a/tGJ0Wj0)

More information: I currently see a psychiatrist, therapist, and have a PCP (shoutout to uni healthcare) and have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety for years now. Unfortunately, because they all work for the university, they have extremely strict rules about writing ESA letters. My therapist actually suggested using an online site lowkey since she couldn't be the one to give me it. I genuinely feel that a dog would help my mental health tremendously. Additionally, I don't want to be on 4 different meds for the rest of my life so finding some natural sources of happiness would be great lol.",7.9910384615384675,8.616193677272733,7.583636363636362,70.83353146853149,62.22727272727273,11.678321678321678,33.74125874125874,11.362043627235082,3.954083916083917,979,37,172,27,13,309,135,220,0.043,0.81,0.147,0.9714,2,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,3,3,4,8,0,1,13,1,22,4,0,2,4,35,41,10,0,13,4,0,1,0,0,4,4,3,0,0,13,8,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,2,0,2,6,7,23,6,21,24,7,12,0,1,3,0,25,4,0,4,7,114,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.11607040259748455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099043628754604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22238975026559554,0.0,0.0,0.0914591886738406,0.0,0.07250604428230399,0.0,0.10121102816361864,0.0,0.0,0.10519468570912048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145325649989999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899312924152244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244471875607447,0.12072380122064975,0.0,0.12426925455324644,0.0,0.12174235341005485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24579811856560385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212809450789282,0.0,0.06014073615179762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10871099070737583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186427127684871,0.11410016984484216,0.0,0.19952610198552312,0.0,0.1311341649169559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661615418566613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642996721970653,0.0,0.0,0.07972443093179853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13724329740839994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241447257852882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401237386766461,0.0,0.0,0.10502811730532363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939482364371606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132117939885803,0.0,0.11986573422977145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819411368560548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16119658846189194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189743597895264,0.0,0.07619740129482508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314124338680735,0.1891751788814881,0.0,0.0,0.18956302373354567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19678038816231674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210158981565342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762020591274393,0.0,0.07621334136648432,0.0,0.0,0.06935613720401193,0.0,0.11274327184319022,0.0,0.0,0.08075392745537245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272784779138383,0.0,0.0,0.14031034987311486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026058539767504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659131806413005,0.0,0.0,0.33797242647488185,0.0,0.0,0.07659485932011963
mentalhealth,eeviebeevie,2020/02/09,"I'm not allowed to do things because of a scary lady in my head (17y/o, f) Sometimes I have this scary lady in my head that tells me I'm not allowed to do things or she'll hurt me. Like ik that sounds stupid, and as a fairly reasonable 17-year-old, I know she's not technically real. But like sometimes she's so real. Like sometimes she makes me not eat or makes me self harm or I know she'll (make me hurt myself?) hurt me worse. And like she wants to take me (kill me sorta I guess) and she makes me have a bunch of nightmares but I've also seen her when I've been awake, and she's been there since I was like 5/6 somewhere around there. But like when I see her when I'm awake, I can't have my back to her because she might get me, but I can't look directly at her either because she'll do the same thing. Like I've told my mom some of it, but shes decided I'm sensitive to ghosts and that it's not an issue, so she's no help. I've been to a therapist before, but he decided I was m\*olested as a kid and I needed more female friends, and I didn't bring up the scary lady to him cuz I only saw him 3 times and didn't really like him. Like Idk if I'm just venting or asking something, but like ik that's not normal, but idk what to do about it, like is it an anxiety thing or like a something else thing or like an overactive imagination. I just don't know.",2.3399025247682985,2.9304373590604063,3.922138063279004,92.21757270693512,74.73825503355704,7.1527005433045705,22.91530840524129,7.2636822038024595,0.5343925854905716,1055,26,256,11,21,353,129,298,0.095,0.75,0.155,0.9625,2,0,2,0,0,3,36.0,0,0,0,0,13,20,2,0,11,0,23,3,2,8,0,57,47,32,2,4,24,1,0,13,1,4,0,1,0,2,15,9,1,0,7,0,0,1,12,6,0,0,10,5,47,14,19,33,5,11,0,3,4,0,28,5,0,11,18,158,62,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232960429815763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919091448198895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805160831332165,0.08455476652332407,0.0,0.0,0.06954736300115902,0.0,0.16540505950022075,0.0,0.07696285324067191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254880047453344,0.07555599669455074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987832700482642,0.0,0.04725428288603651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099636425714345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856473043329168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060624022785154136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29047282358115284,0.0,0.0,0.09440208724854224,0.0,0.0,0.10006505787919308,0.0,0.1491202084466007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5744352788497571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595182990466275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414935317239199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594887416922736,0.0,0.10592921926558344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706453586563095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861784069006652,0.0,0.0,0.09490782399788657,0.0,0.0,0.0687882308591337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058946151074904,0.05794200019086669,0.09299351418622244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207372279569019,0.0,0.09435486541579004,0.0,0.0,0.07481783561320833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13925944291607945,0.2683601116644373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800410837952052,0.0,0.07905375862734103,0.0,0.0,0.10501473469389007,0.3004413959828605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273976863808818,0.0,0.0,0.08642499405836745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053347372620178385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921721637760126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058244235077964376
mentalhealth,medinella,2020/02/09,I need someone to talk to. I really need someone to talk to right now. I'm on the verge of a breakdown and dont want it to escalate. help me please...,-1.03409090909091,0.9250715757575776,1.9305303030303025,95.91579545454546,90.8181818181818,5.724242424242425,20.37121212121212,7.1686216300943375,0.4747030303030302,114,4,28,2,4,40,24,33,0.040999999999999995,0.8690000000000001,0.09,0.3565,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,7,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3359485225375657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921336553778151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4250907092637105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3146526772262672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18363361230623373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24479524385271614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.485750685653728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4607925133338197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16907201527423651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stephcasa,2020/02/09,"How hard was it to start therapy? I've contemplated going to therapy many times but have never been able to make myself go consistently. Some of that is due to funds but if I'm being honest most of it has to do with being afraid I won't like or trust my therapist. 

Anyone have any experiences that helped you with this sort of situation?",4.250597014925372,5.686111970149256,5.8389850746268674,77.06683582089553,71.08955223880595,9.53910447761194,23.84776119402985,9.888512548439397,2.15548,270,7,53,7,5,92,52,67,0.109,0.828,0.062,-0.3244,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,10,0,0,2,1,12,15,5,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,1,0,0,2,1,4,3,10,10,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,5,37,9,0,0.24661208360894896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16770467354277174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724369028759264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412339389182816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803106605853253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209159873638465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529888128346107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048220719383065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16461548078318636,0.2500259454823899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902024420319296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27720231461771605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17455330208384245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5640448201260684,0.2863356366946733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380148915422022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kowalski1998,2020/02/09,My dad talks very weirdly and I wanna find out if it’s some kind of mental disorder So my dad always has strong opinions that are not always right but he always strongly things they’re right because for example someone told him so or he read something about it. And sometimes he talks too enthusiastically like really loudly and fast about these subjects. I think it’s kinda weird that he’s talks this wildly it’s as if he’s on some drugs like speed or cocaine even though he’s not. I’m sure it’s some kind of mental disorder but not sure how to find info about it and what it is maybe someone can help me out because I’m very curious.,1.9076079734219284,4.370836643410858,3.1880675526024373,88.61738372093029,81.7906976744186,5.546179401993357,21.617386489479518,6.868970318607317,0.5887293466223702,513,16,102,6,14,166,76,129,0.09699999999999999,0.7390000000000001,0.16399999999999998,0.9099,0,0,3,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,9,10,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,2,28,8,15,0,3,9,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,13,6,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,6,8,12,7,3,7,0,0,0,0,14,5,0,9,4,57,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34451692355278185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168264503064785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31635274695730675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16005280038039166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911571600347002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522851854644827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250809284692904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874413625933246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348536556684488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865393987339886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781719566183894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805167366109866,0.0,0.08841551066957701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357269589472297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23387817943999356,0.10625017017385263,0.13649969646655968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26015373600662656,0.0,0.0,0.33279205969536313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169058494564156,0.08843400670161901,0.13559837359974386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13187860203504342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22775254434952266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DownToMarsGirl11,2020/02/09,"I don’t know who to turn to I guess I don’t have anyone to really go to, so I thought maybe reddit could be a good place.
My dad has been in the hospital for a month now with an Intubation tube. It’s causing him extreme depression and anxiety and I know he’s scared. I am too. I feel helpless that the hospital is turning a blind eye to his mental health and only focusing on his physical issues.

Today he told the doctors, he wanted to take out the tube no matter the results— which would be him dying because he is unable to breathe on his own right now . My dad has never wanted to give up on life, until now. 

I need mental health resources so I can save my dad — because I don’t think he will last mentally for one more week. The psychiatrist in the hospital hasn’t been helpful. 

Please if you have any outside resources to help it would be appreciated — we are in Ontario.


Even if you can’t help with resources, all good vibes are welcomed",3.7495037593984972,4.9814461157894785,5.0428571428571445,83.08000000000001,72.05263157894737,7.954887218045112,28.308270676691734,8.418075326091056,1.963248120300752,742,28,149,12,14,247,112,190,0.08199999999999999,0.7829999999999999,0.135,0.8548,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,2,0,0,7,7,0,1,11,0,24,7,2,1,2,26,39,8,1,8,2,3,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,5,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,4,3,21,4,22,28,3,20,0,2,2,0,23,10,0,3,9,101,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154604888300734,0.0,0.10298374317634816,0.0,0.0,0.09412926191283437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16412590482597192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382915698567728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074829192896096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159477966762184,0.0,0.13971405071245932,0.0,0.0,0.1377890223280677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891507774697277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06806779238557137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913953451707133,0.07650750839041927,0.2258253249706352,0.0,0.0,0.14829883596127946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28618900634352645,0.0,0.0,0.2706983499017886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14050804764324631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796699214090978,0.10973306679534413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508591327863664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352436368034542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4069951467389356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074522031251686,0.0,0.0,0.099818841672124,0.10382705316486923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912218291524728,0.10238438895321178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14064899035305986,0.1477720641044365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624086141155743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496453418399502,0.0,0.0,0.13477785814640328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121730121251857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625890251909518,0.0,0.10687304733421417,0.0,0.0,0.12760378591513005,0.12863494374599108,0.0,0.0,0.2928552701689776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588044373218832,0.0,0.10798384634931084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912600213212756,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrStrombolii,2020/02/10,"I really really wish I could just die It's all I want, I'm sick and tired of living, I'm sick of having to deal with fucking shitty human beings, I'll never trust anyone again, I hate my life and I hate other people the most, people are like animals.",2.613113207547169,3.7105483773584913,5.1624056603773605,81.65040094339625,74.66037735849056,7.564150943396226,17.023584905660385,8.07648339933343,0.5188905660377356,196,2,39,3,4,70,39,53,0.40399999999999997,0.48700000000000004,0.10800000000000001,-0.9685,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,3,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,2,10,11,2,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,6,2,4,9,2,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,3,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116659049557045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19544915637763646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523732421782149,0.0,0.0,0.25405891025600624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22630934327393826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4833694277351124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729061850621245,0.1195946359323527,0.0,0.21615876628038466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888012540445709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33942052633241543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31364432078277205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813562275370063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443866314235279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815025550352736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,enlightenedjourney,2020/02/10,Hi Everyone. Advice needed I've been really upset lately. I feel really sad for my mum and constantly feeling bad for her. She is not that well and sad at the moment. She constant complains how old she's getting. And her friend after 17 years sunndenly stopped getting into contact. Please help. I feel her sadness.,2.6591379310344827,5.665130689655175,3.920258620689655,79.86935344827589,86.93103448275862,6.348275862068967,26.21551724137931,7.645422480735847,2.2663379310344838,252,11,39,5,8,82,45,58,0.302,0.5670000000000001,0.131,-0.9134,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,11,8,4,0,1,1,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,1,3,9,2,5,7,0,10,0,3,0,0,12,2,0,0,8,24,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22204647913097908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18972751843073932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4911097061579463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171279567611558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3446828735224353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17555729716566745,0.0,0.23743654258927635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15230744695327922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25632528317739417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16848813010973976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384396103214237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494302513066149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911386514785496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18997441446778152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043070159736048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463286389936459
mentalhealth,saullyons,2020/02/10,"Hey guys, dont be like me. Hey guys i consider this to be it, im done, its all mapped out, im not looking for any compliments or it gets better, i have come to terms with how i look i am not overweight or anything i just got unlucky in the face department, im bright but i have no motivation i fucked up my schooling i don’t have many true friends and i try to escape by playing on pc but it never works. I have no motivation for anything, i have come to terms it wont get better guys atleast not for me, just dont be like me, ill see you guys at somepoint. 

Live the best life you can and dont end up like me.

Goodbye guys

Yours sincerely Saul.",1.721422077922078,2.8319500642857136,3.4493506493506523,93.00110389610391,76.92857142857143,6.805194805194804,24.87012987012988,7.348242739294969,0.831,499,17,121,6,11,167,80,140,0.13699999999999998,0.621,0.242,0.9444,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,3,0,6,3,13,1,0,2,0,16,5,1,3,3,21,25,7,0,0,9,0,0,3,1,1,3,0,0,5,6,6,1,0,2,1,0,3,11,1,0,0,2,4,19,12,15,19,4,14,0,0,4,1,11,7,1,2,7,75,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944090729802697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922641217454966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12259430464256765,0.20663377623880286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012584021654612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954636770611435,0.4107328977847588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346693606341653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025404849053892,0.10799725782283516,0.12206618337291936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343080404769917,0.0,0.0,0.5783457459012041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3785536101082275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251269513302298,0.1712155478536329,0.0,0.10315329307633153,0.0,0.1961970308386785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11843610280844293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900979933720405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822703699321035,0.0930895966019134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931241423335139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504560339940795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,banarnald,2020/02/10,"Clean & Sober for the first time and dealing with the real demons in my head makes me question if its even worth it  I dont know if this is the right place for it but I need to get it out. I need to vent or I'm going to go crazy. 

I (28f) was diagnosed ADHD four months ago and prescribed Dex. I took it and it made me feel sick. So my psychiatrist said it means I don't have ADHD. He didnt even discuss dosages with me, just said because half on one tablet didnt work for three days then the diagnosis was a reneg. I know he's wrong. So he prescribed me ritalin. And I took it for one day and felt sick. I have massive anxiety and I honestly believe it's just exacerbating my anxiety, not that I dont have ADHD. I am so mad at my psychiatrist for so many reasons. If you weren't sure, why give me written reports confirming my diagnosis? If you arent going to discuss dosages and long term plans with me, why prescribe me these drugs?

So I took 5 steps back, found a different ADHD specialist and put the drugs away. Starting from scratch.

I have been a daily heavy pot smoker for 13 years. It is the only thing that makes me feel normal. I dont get stoned as much as I get focused. Life is easier, im not angry at everything and reacting on emotion. Im not pacing the hallways every day because I dont know how to channel my energy. And so my new psych told me to quit. To take that away so we can see my mental health issues for what they are and to stop masking with weed.

And all I can say is this must be what hell feels like. It's been two weeks clean and sober and life is miserable. I can't focus, I can't sleep, my emotions are at the surface all the time, I'm amped at everything, Im always tired, Im always angry. Im always bored but theres nothing I want to do. And if this is what life is going to be like for me then fuck it. Fuck the old psych for trying to take the ADHD away from me. I know it's real and he did nothing but fuck with my head. And fuck the new psych for minimising what is my only coping technique and taking that away from me. Fuck it all. Lifes fucked.

How does anyone live like this? I don't see how it's worth it. I cant function like a real human. So what's the point?",0.7306382978723391,2.656398346072187,2.6987649636355435,93.562767312644,82.5244161358811,5.707024438722501,20.00004517323937,6.855684769269737,0.1810457695261332,1715,47,394,20,47,574,202,471,0.16,0.755,0.085,-0.9925,2,0,3,0,0,0,51.0,1,2,1,4,17,17,8,1,17,0,39,21,3,8,5,71,84,42,0,10,14,0,5,4,0,1,12,3,2,1,31,25,0,1,12,1,2,9,16,11,0,7,18,10,51,6,43,63,5,45,2,1,2,6,18,16,7,7,24,241,82,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514441526385946,0.0,0.0518443279178618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599516166331064,0.1267391565487515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948329048933308,0.0,0.0,0.040894785077239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197981642654664,0.04497213928152228,0.0,0.07130506993330997,0.0,0.0,0.06589371656851181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131559334875274,0.06029651854513731,0.0,0.05936207921602466,0.0,0.0611054428233522,0.0,0.0,0.05118151026429857,0.0,0.2741807196066444,0.0,0.13565043031983842,0.0,0.0,0.13157780107601585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725892927866809,0.0,0.0492769943621341,0.0,0.1051269272169763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871686711623494,0.04178242440015414,0.056155751067781465,0.0,0.0,0.049748178765472544,0.0,0.06412690219697689,0.0,0.3244162985555868,0.09166959464288556,0.05610511972292695,0.1329558119904754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004705954933115,0.06216790436923277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158746894543808,0.06104420977308812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856954828205158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652416223555935,0.11429326058745735,0.0,0.051644227205812264,0.051758287284607095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05534088629136553,0.07807974505154028,0.059295644573208524,0.0,0.06370842158407355,0.0,0.0,0.05894015213809845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04668298320397701,0.0,0.04299395421456214,0.0867332855668313,0.0,0.11297232520147266,0.0,0.0,0.057303881877951386,0.11223782720346136,0.0,0.061371239620803826,0.0,0.07926328161369219,0.08896250743755488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611054428233522,0.0,0.05528819328683535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05879460408383736,0.06551772759539362,0.062207081495352486,0.0,0.19970968506257744,0.0,0.06013336943043141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04994674154900962,0.11126719643712417,0.0465104305900023,0.0,0.0,0.0932115715171426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05852825794073825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04139670600774679,0.0,0.0,0.048896931581155864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055122381730810334,0.0,0.13192262517740178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038855512913842656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820733723082599,0.06722107639087654,0.0,0.0558858985082276,0.19494036072102489,0.03970816848161806,0.0,0.05713234322459436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03449656993807153,0.0,0.04691395745095666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554907232895924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042578519151728285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394528162070187,0.0,0.03766307936403408
mentalhealth,TellMyMommy,2020/02/10,"Impulses I must act out Hello Reddit,

I have come to the conclusion that I will actively chose to make a bad decision. Even though I acknowledge that it is immoral, unethical, or illegal, I still say ""fuck it"" and follow through with it. While I will not go into details about what I have done specifically, I'm surprised I'm capable of doing such actions. It's a sense of vengeance within me that never seems to be fully satisfied, which is no way to live your life. There are some things in my life that have let go of me, but I cannot let go of them. I need to go see a therapist, but I thought I'd use the hive mind first to gather some thoughts from the rest of you. Any similar experiences or thoughts on this vague post?",5.069467275494669,5.330905246575345,5.9311872146118745,81.43245814307461,68.45205479452055,10.050532724505327,31.290715372907147,9.994966539143718,2.8270130898021306,570,22,120,13,9,188,99,146,0.10300000000000001,0.846,0.05,-0.7471,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,1,2,6,3,1,0,6,0,15,3,0,2,2,25,32,7,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,12,5,0,0,7,0,0,8,4,2,0,1,4,2,16,1,20,22,3,19,0,0,1,1,6,5,1,5,4,87,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643685971012092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429632527474161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474926277623526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17521959553194938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11309054361231392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16748801157282042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564138107627814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829201838065532,0.0,0.0,0.38923772811257584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35017227627263764,0.24187838317265525,0.0,0.0,0.15119219962463987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429204229766145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288545205130726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695897426504058,0.1320569939498191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16398338566405465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616263979258794,0.0,0.0,0.13644179892540007,0.15587411597982845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13673814356086314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19880198718089226,0.1137523162380928,0.0,0.168224786484169,0.407793525916666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478808691308157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359080868548617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vtsosie2020,2020/02/10,"Does anyone know how civilians can find a Peer Support Specialist for mental health? As a veteran, I have a wide range of services for mental health and support. I even have a case manager who helps me navigate the VA, and gets me in contact with the right people. Recently, I've been recommended a peer support specialist and it has been great. Basically, in order to be a peer support specialist in the VA you have to 
1) be a veteran
2)have a disability rating of at least 70%
3) Have gone through various therapy programs, groups, and classes through the VA
4) have become stable and be willing to share how you have overcome your disability and what coping methods work for you.

It is excellent because, instead of working solely with a therapist who may only use book knowledge, a peer support specialist has first hand experience in the process of recovery.

It is such a great resource and program, but I was wondering how civilians may get the same help. I know that our local NAMI can sometimes introduce us to social workers and case managers. Those people can then help us find community resources like that. However, when I was trying to help a friend find peer support in his state, it seemed that the only ones available pertained to addiction. Basically, they are people who overcame addiction and now help others do the same and help them find treatment. While that is excellent, he doesn't have a problem with substance abuse. Instead, he would like something similar to what I have. Someone who has mental illness but has gone through the recovery and healing needed to become stable. A person with first hand experience who can offer support and guidance. 

Does anyone have any information on how/where to find that, or who he can talk to?",8.387904761904764,8.809161139682539,8.092142857142857,68.21535714285716,61.41269841269842,10.936507936507935,40.67460317460318,10.62613485830676,4.6772222222222215,1409,73,220,31,18,450,158,315,0.027000000000000003,0.754,0.21899999999999997,0.9958,1,0,2,0,1,0,37.0,3,4,2,7,9,16,0,0,23,0,35,8,2,4,0,41,52,22,0,3,3,0,2,2,1,4,6,1,0,1,19,16,0,0,11,1,0,2,1,1,0,3,6,3,18,15,32,39,4,21,0,0,0,0,34,10,0,5,9,160,37,12,0.0,0.08934533457208424,0.0,0.16441020224115127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05127955830085599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545309236107724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04596759777125888,0.16656290432450185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131978894592222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04980581869762559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475256422326261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3446045873565425,0.1282828429160911,0.0,0.0,0.05825950255195314,0.0,0.07879441687834375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16627365640036013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603088938836877,0.0,0.0,0.3032635921507457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288377371467856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368040779657972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22797850491654198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055913566707734966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05109794648060713,0.11470131822146352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683380738443786,0.0658427566458909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215461404581393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744556238499313,0.0,0.0,0.0643974328237033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686479851645056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686825878788331,0.0638923711427874,0.058052233200950376,0.07457976018456985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5989992719508798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060609541378454375,0.0,0.0,0.08623483361235522,0.08755370178608883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05119661529547758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18141142446776595,0.0651277067163618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177601370408144,0.1097948431376924,0.0,0.0,0.05356719123127447,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,createweirdstories,2020/02/10,"Am I strange for being aroused by a man's looks? Or does it make me dirty that I like looking at men? Is it common? I ask because Ive been reading a lot on reddit about dating & attraction lately. A lot of men keep telling me that most women are able to be aroused by ugly men so long as those men say & do the right things. I am not this way though. I just like beauty. My question is: is this how most women are?

Ive been trying to talk about this on various subreddits and getting banned.

The first subreddit I tried talking about my love of beauty on was r/cuckoldpsychology and got banned.

Then I tried posting about it on r/purplepilldebate and alao got banned.

When asked why I was banned they cited a comment of mine where I'm talking about good looks being a key component to attraction. I got banned for it then muted when trying to talk about it with mods. Do mods hate female sexuality??? Here's my conversation with the mods, as well as the comment that I made: [https://m.imgur.com/8SLxF6f](https://m.imgur.com/8SLxF6f)

So that brings me to my question: **are most women like me and they get aroused by beauty?**

I always just considered this a part of my sexuality? Is it wrong or dirty?",3.3961175069471987,5.851849685589521,3.7219472012703454,86.91780766177055,76.16157205240175,6.434378721714968,23.0728463676062,7.520522993642371,0.9503781659388646,954,29,186,13,22,296,114,229,0.136,0.742,0.122,-0.5204,0,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,2,1,17,10,1,0,10,0,20,4,3,3,0,27,37,17,0,0,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,8,16,6,0,6,2,1,0,1,1,2,1,1,8,4,25,8,30,26,7,19,0,0,3,4,24,7,0,9,12,127,41,1,0.11998529086484346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998373738207976,0.2600080250454657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22434010026989454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314191964800232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499993660243112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205942711512156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537472453325432,0.0,0.0,0.1006379693138633,0.28788959390859825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846063409753955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066484395117762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13534863428695176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17585625727626172,0.0,0.0,0.10618320669847553,0.30227227577632537,0.0,0.0,0.204014407157369,0.10829140954404076,0.11353298333927865,0.0800911133533358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12993237752538708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491274165071345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688219713848634,0.0,0.12001776058857333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246678281008507,0.0,0.09541711915266678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.385758527340488,0.10487243278164347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971289576138761,0.0,0.1178849390761125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32584854582353845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952387390329314,0.0,0.0,0.10788118614164308,0.0,0.10826806248737042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118507995419187,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ROBOTTTTT13,2020/02/10,"Waking up from nightmares, it's been two weeks now. I thought it would go away but actually it's getting worse. Hello everyone, before I start I would like to say that I'll try and call to schedule a therapy session tomorrow.

Anyways, here's the deal.

A month ago I discovered that my ex girlfriend is dating one of my best friends. Long story short, my whole life fell apart; I actually thought about suicide.

But, I eventually got over it and thought I was feeling better. Sure, I was restless: couldn't sleep, couldn't come out of bed if I did eventually fall asleep. But as days went by, and with some kind of medication, my overall morale got back to its usual level... mostly.

Until, two weeks ago, nightmares started to show up to wake me in the middle of the night. At first I thought it was just because I was thirsty; in fact, I don't actually remember most of my first nightmares. But now, they have become more vivid, long and terrifying. 

Yesterday I dreamt of reliving that painful moment again but with also my friends fighting against me. I woke up sweaty, with my heart racing and with a really strong nausea.

Is there something I can do to stop this? It's beginning to take it's toll on me.

Edit: a word.",4.3528205128205135,5.9954618888888875,4.910769230769231,83.0092307692308,71.13675213675214,7.935042735042735,30.09401709401709,8.515128840125781,2.2535145299145305,958,40,185,16,18,306,144,234,0.11199999999999999,0.765,0.12300000000000001,0.4194,0,0,1,0,2,1,39.0,0,0,1,5,10,11,1,1,7,0,16,8,5,0,2,35,32,14,1,5,7,1,1,1,3,2,3,1,1,0,12,11,0,1,6,1,0,5,3,3,0,5,14,3,26,8,33,14,6,45,1,0,1,0,10,14,0,4,27,125,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.3374388612867459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043465892484144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217541832293193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829295844540282,0.08862978499734335,0.0,0.07026297968447315,0.12729842900401375,0.09807993921191753,0.0,0.12096093342566695,0.10194035735995058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769594905549592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928847941456287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743348082938826,0.11883062625263112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013830447693797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058280207729858785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960845295969645,0.0,0.0,0.17810311796605727,0.0,0.0602199242597201,0.0,0.06550636248976859,0.0,0.1843719788006552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13658667483733458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002820709366145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814133466628626,0.05631145901854901,0.0,0.0,0.20400745648985627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11611489129132695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200146647466803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816609358675007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810488582307465,0.0,0.12264747812569265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738401399798143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305699982613431,0.0,0.0,0.0916614047982249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534578964732532,0.0,0.0,0.08873474098720491,0.0,0.0,0.16316685004007825,0.0,0.0,0.09636465158881713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260785200955671,0.0,0.1086335878033382,0.0,0.08666309180568779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181276934134864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3660223539543693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825570434026652,0.0,0.2251895229929931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694541290710473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18491332761486806,0.0,0.0,0.10684953714521933,0.0,0.12868651904058007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746238398818615,0.163758414697521,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bakedbeansupontoast,2020/02/10,"I’ve been feeling so much better after making changes to my life: what can you recommend that has helped? None of these things have been miracle cures but I’ve quit smoking, started running every day, smoke weed twice per week maximum.

I’ve been feeling a lot better each day. Can you recommend any lifestyle changes that have helped you?",5.509193548387097,7.703436693548388,4.662129032258068,83.72319354838713,69.16129032258064,7.540645161290323,31.754838709677426,8.238735603445708,2.47811870967742,273,12,47,4,5,81,45,62,0.0,0.7490000000000001,0.251,0.9339,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,3,0,3,1,2,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,1,0,6,12,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,2,4,2,3,9,4,6,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15946567821804428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41478624038190826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4961324606083259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024617184032246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975734360517638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371369777289201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3143561554452246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16563183048279498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19936055986686507,0.0,0.0,0.15652825132261594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17238192737969935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494159190689853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597784733112958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15578907145847898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18809896773035106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GenusUnkown,2020/02/10,Advice wanted Im a 16 year old boy at school and ive been having some real problems. I have an iq of 145 which leads me to not fit in with the people around me and have no friends but at the same time i suffer from really bad brain fog which means i dont get the benefits from being intelligent; only the negatives. On top of that I am incredibly emotionally numb so i find very little pleasure in life. I am writing this in the hope that somebody can relate and maybe give me some much needed advice.,5.307411003236247,5.138780145631067,6.456456310679612,79.34869741100327,67.93203883495146,9.196763754045307,26.875404530744337,8.841846274778883,1.8101210355987047,397,10,81,6,6,134,77,103,0.17800000000000002,0.679,0.14300000000000002,-0.4784,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,2,8,0,0,7,0,10,3,1,1,0,19,16,5,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,0,10,4,13,14,4,14,0,1,0,0,4,10,0,3,3,56,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807173067753832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17341543893581032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16265186937623086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21746390646726765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283069651848335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21912648338261145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17804586695046906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505038531195372,0.0,0.10177621525280484,0.18687221528413825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934827404201917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104200232065735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759469803838706,0.0,0.19524318396107604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19570519676299394,0.212196924852236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320218025694456,0.1444435132906618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20441235237194827,0.0,0.0,0.14815600540723894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13505145814176364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18639959077172055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217277819781023,0.12479540738827476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19715043156484527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359084759022582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16073238360876604,0.11489950428529858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254463605092934
mentalhealth,world_famous_dredd,2020/02/10,"Discovering I have PTSD Or something similar, anyway. I've recently started therapy and have also been prescribed medication for an anxious disorder. I've been a very anxious person all my life and have recently learned I've been having ""anxiety attacks"" (sorry of it's not the proper term; english is my second language) and I didn't know I was having them because I didn't know what they were. I thought everyone just basically sat staring at the wall and have their brains go off into catastrophic scenarios while simultaneously wondering if they had heart problems for hours on end because I do this. I've been doing it so much for so long it was just normal, and realizing not everyone goes through that was like finding out some people stand up to wipe their ass instead of staying seated on the toilet. And someone in my life realized I was going through this problem, which is invisible to most, and wanted me to know that I can live without this. So I decided to finally seek treatment, at almost 30 years old.

This anxiety has been present in a lot of aspects of my life, and since I've started therapy and medication, I've been able to see more objectively just how stunted I am. I'm afraid of cars, so I don't drive, will avoid getting into a car at all, if I can, and get super nervous crossing the street. I thought it was generalized anxiety, but really, I just remember what it was like to be in a car with my father.
I'm an opinionated person and I stand my ground, but when a man raises his voice I get so shaken up. If an older man is yelling, I sometimes just lose my shit and cry, even if he's not yelling at me. Even so little as a disapproving glance can make me feel as though I'm being scolded and will spiral into self doubt for days on end, even if my pride keeps telling me I don't give a crap what anyone thinks.
I've never studied and instead dropped out of high school, because no matter what I did, it was gonna be worthless anyway. That little voice in my head would say ""what, you think you're so smart? You think you can change the world, don't you? Well aren't you fucking special?"" And I'm coming to terms with the fact that that is my father's voice. I haven't spoken to the man in 15 years, but I'm still talking with him, in my head, every damn day of my life.
Coming to terms with all of this makes me so angry. I'm properly insulted that this man would still have so much power over me even after cutting him out of my life for what has literally been half my life. Insulted and ashamed of somehow still being a scolded child.

I guess if I'm posting today, it's because he sent me a Facebook friend request the other day. I'm afraid of him, and it's like he poked my delicate little bubble. I don't even know if I have anything to say to him. What would I tell him? You ruined my life? That would give him too much power, and he'd love that. Your grandchildren will never know your name? Why would I say anything to him if it's just to spew hatred? I'm not like him, I don't seek to hurt.

I guess I just needed to scream into the wind a bit. Thank you to anyone who read this. And if anyone is going through something similar, just know that it may be a long road to recovery, but I firmly believe we can heal these scars so long as we just keep trying.",5.950277189840442,5.52974417018072,6.638738196027354,79.42980462390102,66.6355421686747,9.467535004884402,32.102572451970055,8.918530864059932,2.4885139693910783,2595,94,524,38,37,857,280,664,0.127,0.8059999999999999,0.067,-0.9896,2,1,2,0,2,0,71.0,2,9,5,5,38,33,8,6,23,0,64,19,7,3,6,116,113,51,0,19,28,2,1,4,1,10,10,9,0,8,37,34,0,3,19,1,0,11,17,21,1,2,23,13,78,12,69,74,14,80,0,4,3,3,55,33,5,21,35,361,115,3,0.06431305185245964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440023142914578,0.0,0.0,0.05143112433074633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759792590370305,0.14531088522174887,0.0,0.13490754362453194,0.0,0.1058483236948375,0.0,0.0,0.07316538101579219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568185579083748,0.0,0.0,0.07245878601031988,0.0,0.0,0.07021319568849321,0.0,0.0,0.07179463547060642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803468125354856,0.11079999900821068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064486755166494,0.12442979387641352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370832924442933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392454963230905,0.0,0.0,0.2123908209885588,0.0,0.05418651998487895,0.12290775424062785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03251861140759669,0.0,0.0,0.07045180470723021,0.05878096426397573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049688104325787394,0.05945638011088793,0.1008027455087532,0.12338987921132387,0.10965176838784307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416961546661241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200749103306447,0.0,0.0,0.07621127610043626,0.0,0.06795027031369212,0.0,0.0,0.06333540119691833,0.0,0.0688484521622347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143287909854036,0.0,0.0,0.2120686281990149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31798347340406796,0.12568043422953246,0.19337572080334012,0.05678960305545268,0.17074508122712986,0.0,0.07194985438134678,0.0,0.05467665682846285,0.0580450402460332,0.0,0.08585892302109778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957726733027702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14183247919843991,0.04768731304087778,0.09920438072500072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301313586156555,0.0,0.0,0.06748572929936833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04458657238607644,0.11231135241503287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06159412590511185,0.0,0.0,0.12307780991086174,0.07517851599499956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433045587765994,0.0,0.041200587846496745,0.0,0.1270027598398347,0.0,0.07285415066864724,0.0,0.0,0.15343296050989125,0.0,0.06508824198465919,0.05124917568751732,0.0,0.06709253923754624,0.0,0.06601642352316102,0.05320042108509465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054492240130847414,0.09902265873490737,0.06360725276256032,0.07199319616172134,0.09104221823726437,0.06854915615088712,0.1540814588577903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051692394943900974,0.11242488406311248,0.059210817414723886,0.14709515946266774,0.0,0.0,0.12362762033951953,0.06318724690984197,0.10211475866649923,0.0,0.0,0.060961253228360324,0.0,0.0,0.043664340588222376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05306500318594239,0.037933504276297214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05782515730238795,0.0,0.058032526041538475,0.0,0.0,0.061995486969163766,0.06974476132287533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22843073402192465,0.0,0.0,0.08283099361350454
mentalhealth,goshuaposh,2020/02/10,"My girlfriend has cancer and I am suffering from it My girlfriend of a few months around 8 to 9 has been diagnosed with cancer and i can’t sleep because of it, I am in school and i’m so tired in the morning since I rarely get over a few hours of sleep which results in me getting into trouble or detentions which makes it even worse and i’m stuck in a loop of crying and just hurting mentally , I don’t think i’m depressed but i’m really anxious, I don’t want to seek help in school or my town or from my parents or brothers since I am to scared to say anything. I am only asking for help because i know it’s getting worse since i used to be a grade A and B student and now i’m on report with multiple detentions and missed homework’s , I cba to meet up with my friends or talk to my parents and would rather sleep then do anything. Is there anything I can do other than seek help, thanks guys it is an appreciated",2.2454468911917083,3.7729565854922313,3.726810233160623,89.82783193005183,76.40932642487047,6.483031088082902,26.570272020725387,7.1686216300943375,1.165528756476684,723,28,157,8,16,239,102,193,0.17300000000000001,0.703,0.124,-0.6205,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,1,7,0,17,7,3,3,0,29,34,17,0,3,8,3,0,0,3,1,4,1,1,1,8,14,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,2,1,19,2,28,30,2,15,0,4,0,0,14,11,0,5,4,103,27,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14308910393675645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31268975688068745,0.11275374622415528,0.1184094694576671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15442082606214294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912943659069554,0.0,0.0,0.10909158162333993,0.12855665547875264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365735908433179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785676156941962,0.0,0.19852297379100367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541274925140886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546914385624662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473402513393544,0.0,0.13559153964678106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960871039997507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454615317576393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12764291501159808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010983487730329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633020414898467,0.0,0.0,0.2812806161771849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114127427723455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072466262120558,0.1268081855324551,0.25637221074501315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3143219685369432,0.0,0.3802527063351876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180405220958147,0.0,0.11661098608416788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115824857956673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14557638264395592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10939308076004924,0.0,0.0,0.07470701355639515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25815356035480874,0.08997522516756533,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,haveanmdmazingtime,2020/02/10,"How many meds did you have to go through before you found the one? First saw my GP in the middle of December, was prescribed 20mg fluoxetine. Took this for a month and didn't notice any change, have since been on 50mg sertraline and still not noticing a great deal of difference. I've also found that I haven't suffered any of the side effects, although this is probably a good thing, it makes me feel like the meds really are doing nothing for me. I have another appointment tomorrow, should I ask to carry on with the sertraline but on a higher dose or try something new?",8.98848214285714,6.870227312499999,8.633500000000002,73.06150000000002,61.58928571428571,12.531428571428574,37.57857142857143,11.20814326018867,3.9973335714285714,457,17,88,10,5,147,82,112,0.021,0.9229999999999999,0.055999999999999994,0.4073,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,2,3,4,0,0,9,0,12,1,0,3,0,13,20,7,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,8,2,8,3,13,11,0,13,0,1,1,0,4,6,0,1,6,58,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307526136284306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223741431443968,0.17144626467630128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15285244299266773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912829070703914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17296359951362505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856354160715792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082495146162308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267160184496916,0.11680597161759855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907484882293158,0.0,0.35854334570001484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292204213081127,0.13713784962152334,0.0,0.1802617022000496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987889372099294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913895753217588,0.16576552166369396,0.0,0.0,0.36322806875020935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305058595673173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15791139935633616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688472661605626,0.3722965724446161,0.0,0.0,0.11079329114339874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17628297604413504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474366668155298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525067152480533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258719462825848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057303153487326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862356609887856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18165690932174547,0.1110072301269715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KevBot42,2020/02/10,BiPolar here having a rough day Hey folks. I'm having a severe depressive episode and have been given all the moral support in the world from friends and family but I still feel like I'm being swallowed whole by a black wave. It hurts and it's exhausting and scary and I don't know what to do.,2.0174999999999983,4.269884416666667,2.8633333333333333,92.345,79.83333333333334,6.0,21.666666666666664,7.1686216300943375,0.6071666666666666,235,7,49,3,6,74,46,60,0.23399999999999999,0.657,0.109,-0.8462,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,5,0,7,3,0,0,1,9,13,6,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,3,2,3,4,10,2,4,1,2,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,31,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20875178455086255,0.0,0.27879173645205835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30514395034211905,0.0,0.1636662237629556,0.2312425531981956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500803093652892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34651437098833465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17789029140306786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15813745714270255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36567496006825295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584974104731767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3673169591652847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613857506856634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EstupidBean,2020/02/10,"Lately I’ve been feeling detached.. I reside

On the edge of the moon 

With one hand clutching my heart 

I can’t let it

But can’t stop it from 

Falling apart 



Sitting here

I’ve wished upon every fallen star 

And not once has 

One

Answered my call 



I look up and I’m...

Hanging out 

One glance down and I’m...

Hanging off",-1.0172727272727258,1.0056136363636412,0.8742424242424249,99.48136363636364,102.03030303030305,2.4000000000000004,18.12121212121212,3.1291,-0.9255878787878786,244,8,53,0,11,79,48,66,0.1,0.825,0.075,-0.1531,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,5,2,2,0,0,11,10,4,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,1,4,5,0,9,8,0,14,0,0,2,0,1,7,0,0,2,32,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27563555708302784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274333166869031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648810900840505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31987629575216114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045003614574655,0.0,0.0,0.276028570179692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22667884735190386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874737816125065,0.5487482930597306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22567917279184535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31041388958127364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soyymoyy,2020/02/10,"I'm Stalling Hi, I'm on mobile, sorry. 

Tldr; Great things are happening and I cant be happy about them.

I'm a 21 year old female. I'm in love with an amazing guy, have a fantastic support system. Just started my program at university that I've been waiting to get into. Got hired at the best company I've ever worked for. My SO started their mental health recovery journey and I'm so proud of them. The problem is I dont feel how I should about any of this. I feel like the effort I put in is crushing me. Like I'm running towards great things but I just want to stop. I know I sound like a spoiled brat, I'm just so tired. I'm not actively planning my suicide nor do I have a plan, I'm just waiting until I die. I want my life to be over already. I'm so tired of trying but I'm not going through anything that any other 21 year old doesn't go through. The people around me have been amazing and kind, I cant find the effort to give that back to them. I tried medication, therapy, and weed. I switched my birth control, everything I do isn't making a difference. I'm a pretty small person but recently I lost about 50lb in a couple of months, enough to make my doctor concerned and I needed to take another thyroid test. I have no appetite and dont feel the need to take care of myself. I know something is wrong and getting worse but nothing I do is helping. It's like I'm drowning and I'm not even trying to swim. I should be content, I have everything I want for. It makes me feel so selfish and ungrateful that I feel this way by I dont know how to feel any other way about it.",1.3650765527202682,3.172837811940301,3.3480982185845,90.30585459797787,79.83582089552239,5.9942224362060665,24.836302359171878,6.968188349444268,0.9441670678863744,1237,47,268,14,31,418,161,335,0.17300000000000001,0.68,0.147,-0.937,0,0,1,0,0,1,35.0,0,0,4,9,19,19,0,0,14,0,27,8,0,6,1,51,75,22,3,8,11,0,6,4,0,2,7,1,0,2,13,12,0,4,10,1,0,6,12,4,0,0,4,7,39,15,36,66,2,33,0,1,0,1,10,11,0,0,17,163,52,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094530546410256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18661909130507973,0.09591986331122368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527640546724752,0.08143244092859056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033888521329122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959977191840822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093265199262797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259736509872,0.0,0.10121571689840722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949369543329746,0.09557225422952154,0.0,0.09362888022813892,0.0,0.0,0.3216252296235529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09451847265497364,0.0,0.06041859521309024,0.0827446764325885,0.0,0.0,0.16442426320998038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27751606360143033,0.06534999670391439,0.0,0.0,0.08360679782606012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558417275150807,0.0877514754493871,0.10397508043252483,0.0,0.07316118082535898,0.20170375677677066,0.0,0.09057496213744097,0.08089133552735163,0.09737719374675888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723400218977336,0.0,0.0,0.06131398799091554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525748349012994,0.1508173534161562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646117334699687,0.17876090987775264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09985613262474717,0.0,0.08256006013888728,0.0,0.18318148677396312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215177505326512,0.09218562118522584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301473866838455,0.0,0.0,0.13565560178195835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777304983017759,0.0,0.19197594991256065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634174785990072,0.07987273305662455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306330039313468,0.0,0.08752954037875535,0.0,0.09195797606882164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032085640510844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042218099612023,0.0,0.10239914692984678,0.129493424089062,0.0,0.0,0.07647747500377873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005916806781773,0.1038051247002514,0.0,0.0,0.1375561334585639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046100162899534,0.0,0.12154429415250273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21027487914565124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18631724103946284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16186356565807686,0.14521772419838824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659513243115531,0.0,0.09322118004091086,0.0,0.10001391740993204,0.0,0.11781423158823752
mentalhealth,jibrish123654,2020/02/10,Am i going insane? For the past month i can not fell any sort of emotions. I can not feel happiness nor pain. I honestly dont know if im even alive at some points in my life. I have been strugling with depresion almost my whole life (15 years) And i was always able to Just lie down cry talk about it And be Fine but As of lately i can not feel anything. Like i was Just a doll walking around. I was always able to make myself cry And was always sensitive but i cant even do that no matter what i think about. I dont want to Die it is more likely that i Just dont care if i Die. Even if i get a little bit of some emotions ať this point i have trouble recognising them(if it is pain or sadness etc) but it is like when i want to talk about it i can not. Like something is stopping me from telling anyone. I cant talk about it with my psychyatrist because when im sitting There ready to talk about it i Just cant. And ať this point i can not think anything else than if i am going insane or is it Just a phase of something. I tried doing something that i liked before but it did not spark anything i was Just sitting There And didnt feel anything.,1.0346553552492068,2.8011445934959376,2.5398409331919436,95.90330328738071,80.70731707317074,5.2538706256627785,20.8582537999293,6.0469075449839425,-0.06152435489572295,894,25,208,6,23,291,113,246,0.162,0.726,0.113,-0.8572,0,0,3,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,0,19,13,0,0,4,0,31,4,0,1,0,45,44,19,2,6,22,0,3,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,15,8,0,1,6,0,0,4,15,4,0,0,8,3,30,9,24,35,6,21,0,1,0,0,5,8,0,10,12,145,45,0,0.1851939252825136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272248248167747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311442721166333,0.0,0.0,0.06296910988120251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474594926538617,0.0,0.3047976419248616,0.08243092844682674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05644624897217576,0.0,0.07879319511915278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109190080119032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440877467681873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034268308860505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922020560931879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3255688517680809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735288050404178,0.2083182395219465,0.0,0.0,0.10327009024665168,0.18347826156538974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14045941961653086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048378091181363415,0.0,0.1052499755337354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857118856514174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000412187422479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050888869047856035,0.0,0.1044534070991382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308079462620773,0.2261909934663571,0.09280648266146192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061809191590237664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391001215369722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19705939364317004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839427840579707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626021790379822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138569971585822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741520698561205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977037242417492,0.08093382672479657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866478951807727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06286725940915071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923217534077917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338120196078736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059629408030296475
mentalhealth,airfire0,2020/02/10,"Do I need to leave my husband or is it my mental illness? I am a 20 year old female, with a 16 month old son. I got pregnant when I was 18 years old, the guy was 32. We met at his work (he sold me a vehicle) and I was super into him immediately. I found that as we went on dates, I was very confused. I noticed he was very dry at times. He barely texted me, didn’t try to hold on much of a conversation on dates. Then other times, he was a lot of fun. I think I was just excited someone older was into me. I had sexual experience before and a couple “in school” boyfriends, but he was the first real guy I actually went on dates with. I got pregnant very fast. I knew him about 3 weeks, and was pregnant. I tried really hard to make things work for the fact we had a child together and I wanted us to make this work and be a family. He promised me he loved me, didn’t want anyone else, wanted to spend his life with me. I was very immature and broke up with him every other week. Once I found tinder in his phone and he told me that it was there from before we met, but I never remembered that. I was very drunk that night and we were staying at a resort for his work function. I got upset and left the hotel room. I ended up in his co workers room asking him to call my boyfriend. He tried to feel me up. He was a disgusting old man probably early 50’s. My boyfriend came to the room and just said “let’s go”. He never tried talking to me about the tinder thing. He never tried apologizing. He made no effort at all to really be with me. The next issue was when we were supposed to be moving in together. I expressed I didn’t feel safe in the neighborhood at one set of apartments and he said “well I won’t be outside”.
He was very selfish. 
We broke up a bunch more then got back together after he came to one of my ultrasounds. Finally broke up for the final time. 
All I wanted was for him to try. I wanted him to be more of a man, take more initiative to make things work instead of just letting me go so easily. He truly made me feel like he didn’t give a damn about me or my safety. He was 32 and a virgin. He never had sex before or a girlfriend. He had issues staying hard and thought his issues stemmed from his childhood. 
His father murdered his mother and step mom.
Even though me and him broke up, I secretly was hoping he would try to change or work on himself. Or that we could at least be friends and raise the baby right together. 
We had a lawyer together and sat down and made a parenting plan.
3 weeks later he gets into another relationship with a woman. He never ask how my pregnancy is going. I had to get upset and argue with him about why he seemed so uninterested in the pregnancy. He acted like it was an issue to buy baby supplies knowing I was only 18 and a student. 
Instead he could go over to his 37 year old girlfriends house and give her money for loans and spend time with her child. He knew this woman 3 weeks, and wanted to introduce her to me. 
I was 6 months pregnant, in constant pain, and he wanted me to meet a woman he has known less than a month. I was a floored.
She helps him pick a custody lawyer and I get severed with a battle that costs my grandparents $14,000.
He involved her in my pregnancy. Let her listen in on our phone calls. He even tried asking to be in the delivery room and I was on the news. Then he tried suing for the baby to take his last name even though we were never married and I was the primary custodian. I was on the news again. 
I did some research on his girlfriend to find out she is a radical atheist. She says people who believe in Gods are shit and deserve to die. She is off the wall politically crazy, and every word out of her mouth was profanity. She had a history of drug use and prison time. The local police department said she was a troublemaker. 
I expressed all this to him and he had no problem with it aside from her cussing. I cried and cried for him to please drop the attorneys and just try to get a long for our child’s sake. I couldn’t believe he wanted to expose our child to something like that. 
He ends up breaking up with her the month our son is born. The judge put her in a parenting plan that said she is to never be around our child. 
Fast forward a few months and the issues still didn’t stop. He wanted overnights at 3 months even though I was breastfeeding. He wanted people I never met around our newborn. 
I didn’t trust his judgment anyways after the woman he tried to bring into our child’s life. I started coming over having sex with him. I wanted to get back together with him to make things cordial enough for our son. That led to me falling deeply in love with him. Getting married. And now, I’m pregnant again. I have already scheduled an appointment for an abortion. 

I have suffered from panic attacks since I was 12 years old. I had a fear of big open places. Once I left whatever was triggering me, my panic went away. My anxiety has gotten significantly worse. Starting in October I have had to call an ambulance out multiple times. My attacks get so bad I cry, hyperventilate, I get dizzy, my heart rate goes up. I feel like I will die. 
Yesterday it was so bad, I had to take half a Xanax. It calmed me down immediately. My main symptoms now are more physiological. I have been very depressed, my whole day is spent avoiding a panic attack or thinking about one. For a while I was scared to even leave my house. I feel “unreal” at times or like I’m going to lose my mind and go crazy. My fear is ending up in a physh ward or completely being unstable. I know logically this isn’t going to happen because if I’m that scared of it happening, it’s not going to happen. I worry obsessively over my health. Constantly monitoring blood pressure and sugar levels. I can’t live like this anymore. I think something is medically wrong until I realize.. if something was wrong, the Xanax wouldn’t have worked. It is anxiety. And obviously pregnancy hormones. There’s no way I could’ve kept this child. 

My question is, is me focusing on the issue of him being with another woman and putting me through that a part of my OCD and obsessive thought process, or is it a warning I should leave him? I love my husband with all of my heart. He has apologized many times, and said he would never do that to me again. That he knew it was so wrong. We’ve been doing better. The thought of leaving him makes me physically sick because he does help me through my panic attacks so much... but yet I wonder if he is the reason I’m having them. 

I think about this constantly and the entire situation makes me sick.. and it was 2 years ago. This has been going on since September. I am wondering if I should leave him, or try to make this work?",2.5883845652391955,4.44913587426036,4.047409487513793,86.4519581787183,76.35207100591717,7.009086350416207,24.031591615685482,7.891335392355504,1.237860224651489,5250,170,1078,82,118,1738,472,1352,0.17600000000000002,0.755,0.068,-0.9994,3,1,4,0,0,0,145.0,19,0,1,16,44,60,10,15,69,0,117,25,5,16,15,200,226,78,3,26,22,10,7,6,4,7,12,7,4,17,41,82,2,5,30,2,8,25,24,40,1,5,94,15,188,20,162,109,20,192,0,7,0,6,183,76,2,22,93,715,229,14,0.0,0.0,0.03243727413969582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02946509914278948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036680973269549055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06970970915312144,0.05085675003962847,0.0,0.032964974432108614,0.02324205839128584,0.03405812864749218,0.0,0.05918098271618954,0.09322424753155738,0.15126039764144006,0.031229909623603225,0.051118747057259266,0.05550773062295601,0.04052537740092217,0.0,0.08485392812555613,0.07489979982589945,0.0,0.029397923863665763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182473278501653,0.07603500884902815,0.0,0.0,0.035163327235318974,0.028633165842865738,0.03485132392871038,0.1077613259579126,0.0,0.07961788615239385,0.036779233951884975,0.10953716028846956,0.021436937158533915,0.0,0.028629412426341,0.0,0.06899538058099433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029088394715127232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03854764386635084,0.0,0.02776760841114485,0.0,0.08832185611176675,0.03434562462311447,0.0,0.10977295406685264,0.0,0.056011972096130576,0.0,0.0,0.032514926914065635,0.031335548588792984,0.07480808832870749,0.08403527091587999,0.04749307501206865,0.0,0.07282520672087102,0.030380597711905374,0.028273778026792432,0.0,0.072891504503539,0.02568100621503536,0.0,0.13893149243822334,0.06377333766090011,0.1700186262084688,0.0,0.10633969775555213,0.0,0.0,0.06582530509525024,0.08818160198461356,0.0,0.05955270817608625,0.0,0.0,0.03533237943871192,0.0,0.07877870495354483,0.044559907847205794,0.0,0.0,0.033014646178437294,0.0,0.07670858999792171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081624469207464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03653547686910152,0.027094893703447937,0.0,0.17598087525911954,0.07223033389021763,0.10196991889225293,0.04695654260324091,0.09743579644520334,0.0,0.02935137431394371,0.029416198985511424,0.0,0.037186861576027234,0.0,0.02825931041004468,0.09000071905762333,0.09435697790171156,0.15531488833673462,0.033699965189118664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03348562651754385,0.0334979253466575,0.0,0.033562747477656946,0.038930081112637384,0.15919026635650005,0.035328673354939506,0.048870191758669516,0.024646908937227048,0.2307294187687241,0.0,0.0353509308130066,0.03119332388315424,0.0,0.0,0.0378437608903555,0.20927762776377265,0.07079865724429325,0.06757249669135854,0.02528038463331679,0.03536951720973908,0.15599909010905735,0.07381778362950281,0.03599549110247632,0.0,0.046088618517076345,0.0,0.034728542219829066,0.03648734594027297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03583815317261318,0.03180602323374805,0.0,0.0668304097272121,0.03723621111005744,0.0,0.0,0.03783419778962773,0.04258856589140871,0.03417607601866898,0.0,0.035687132219035134,0.03765424182507296,0.028386628792497363,0.15809342632207998,0.02643364286020754,0.0665577267947117,0.03364047732580247,0.0,0.030260288132175638,0.0,0.037551540727176716,0.03412020252728446,0.05499265319404651,0.03736295581219237,0.0,0.0,0.028163995718090126,0.07676892333405146,0.0,0.0,0.047054638209821496,0.07085846115617392,0.02654536705341108,0.02778998194555767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0345489053084976,0.07497663459323156,0.026716912102751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833225050687693,0.08519495036404562,0.09797387740714003,0.07916612399117663,0.15505927336591468,0.0,0.0,0.03176207709429036,0.0,0.2708119097486918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03998341656865837,0.02870853625058657,0.0,0.19198435653305107,0.21566280894102996,0.02638422577006357,0.10665192995948132,0.0,0.02988659447201581,0.092440951921672,0.029993771792446708,0.037111077369260066,0.0,0.0,0.07209434424204253,0.19359190693284647,0.03375665562267671,0.03387422126779803,0.04722523573577024,0.10902759115631803,0.0,0.10702678692664412
mentalhealth,YamunaHrodvitnir,2020/02/10,"Stopping negative thought loops So I have diagnosed PTSD, which has been doing it's best to ruin my life for about 8 years. I'm getting better at handling it overall, but I still and might always struggle with flashbacks and what I call negative thought loops. It seems like when my mental health takes a down swing, every single thing that I think about eventually leads to my thinking about the traumatic events. Each connected thought leads to a thought chain about one of the people involved, and I ultimately end up going over the experiences in my head. I have to try to stop myself when I realize I'm doing it and tell myself that I'm not supposed to be thinking about that. But even when I succeed at changing the subject of my thoughts, it eventually gets back to it. 
What are some techniques that I may be able to use to stop it from getting there over and over? To break the loop, so to speak?",6.0903993694167085,6.856955202312143,5.82224908039937,81.33193378875461,66.34104046242774,8.60304781923279,33.06831318970048,8.575989854853784,2.5515942196531802,722,30,136,10,11,224,101,173,0.138,0.7959999999999999,0.066,-0.9179,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,5,14,6,0,1,7,0,11,4,1,3,0,29,29,12,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,15,7,0,3,10,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,6,1,16,4,29,19,4,23,0,1,0,0,4,8,0,4,12,102,31,3,0.13855767968747362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529108912427433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106542303024517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14540773650248764,0.12254300791316328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14148288263820827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14657565301665934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14063312826654129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272097810492465,0.0,0.0,0.09151604066497676,0.0,0.11674082108041972,0.0,0.0,0.13553599786857293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171720066381142,0.0,0.07874552242937269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14220015325090554,0.14728033425857945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09786738680066476,0.06769228347656213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13963355201091196,0.14698780205985248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389026965716724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605844905641912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16196651283959215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613770772496347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11065234198066777,0.3475212732627809,0.0,0.1448505709069363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041781314089828,0.0,0.12110551922379613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205156563989744,0.26634649928951604,0.0,0.5499966031442245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407156934282987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196693481228809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922660292676039
mentalhealth,throwaway4929362819,2020/02/10,"Suspect I have undiagnosed ADD I already see a psychiatrist for OCD and have an appointment in 2 day. I suspect I had ADD. I am very disorganized. I am late to things, forget things, lose things frequently, etc. I am bad at time management. I am currently involved with my state's vocational rehabilitation program. They send me to job club where you spend 2 hours a week at an organization looking for jobs. Otherwise I don't look for jobs on my own because I don't have any focus whatsoever. I feel like if I had focus I would have found a job a long time ago. I don't think I'll be able to address these issues without professional help.

The thing is, I am worried my psychiatrist will put me on controlled substances. I am willing to take any medication that isn't a controlled substance. I know Strattera exists. I am just nervous bringing this up. I also know I will have to do therapy to change patterns of behavior, not just take meds, if I am prescribed them.",3.488330170777985,5.77307668817204,5.108241619228341,77.92648007590135,75.12903225806451,8.032384566729919,30.833649588867804,8.841846274778883,2.7889345983554708,768,37,143,17,17,259,112,186,0.13,0.855,0.015,-0.9437,5,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,2,3,4,4,0,1,8,0,26,1,0,2,0,21,37,4,0,3,6,0,1,1,0,4,1,0,1,0,7,4,0,2,7,1,1,3,6,3,0,0,3,4,29,1,18,29,2,21,0,1,3,0,6,7,0,2,11,98,36,7,0.1267296207993683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233816241086968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398492878837558,0.10134563196710393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17236097577487966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581393986767536,0.07725320057748143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340631350576835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28427609152974603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817301213356449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413370266536539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407830407521131,0.09053566642084428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895248801996726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494419347605989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480314874925885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13227279872538847,0.5030383757683681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13929457065085374,0.0,0.14295653221543034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061913691362165735,0.0,0.0,0.11215172645884394,0.21284192760175508,0.141778029492922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14076803956015302,0.12766676032305527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739827185950153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098710003778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905698062904372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492636598004613,0.0,0.33677411555519865,0.08120322389042606,0.0,0.0,0.14779412204145134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456520935904796,0.0,0.0,0.10165485759236664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221628320935267,0.0,0.0,0.12870008152394252,0.0,0.09002508656541923,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gengarsprite,2020/02/10,"Can't remember emotions in the past? I've noticed I have a lot of trouble knowing how I felt about something after it happens (e.g. if something bad happened, I can't recall the exact feelings/thoughts that event caused). On a related note, I can't remember my general feelings in the past. It's very difficult for me to tell, for example, if I was as anxious a month/year ago as I am today. I have some memory issues in general and have trouble placing events in a timeline. Is this a product of my depression or something else?",5.132968099861305,6.164501436893206,6.416532593619973,75.26699029126216,68.6116504854369,9.380859916782248,38.98613037447989,9.606745405546679,4.1064907073509005,420,25,73,9,7,142,68,103,0.185,0.815,0.0,-0.9498,0,0,3,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,8,0,9,0,0,2,1,16,14,7,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,2,10,0,14,12,2,13,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,5,7,52,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532349215642914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19528892029387096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433555283491978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775805860663013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888888533251987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14440702460527746,0.19445052947189184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740603983733798,0.0,0.16597808199748496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057289529338536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18042677130183346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950024112462691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14696414877680292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379796702347449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19680862784914527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3300395448374985,0.0,0.0,0.1806077562240263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3916460463727917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3992411458947089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109215107556698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723597468708496,0.0,0.0,0.16385637324499486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263222141629986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111319776801062
mentalhealth,PT_queen,2020/02/10,"Having trouble healing from a relationship with an emotionally deceitful man I (25F) met a guy (25M) on Bumble about 5 months ago. We hit it off immediately and had a very strong connection.  Things progressed at a very rapid rate - within a couple months, he was professing his love for me, talking about how he couldn't wait to get married and have kids and settle in Toronto (our hometown) with me. I thought it was moving a bit fast, but after a previous relationship that ended in infidelity, it felt nice to be wanted like that, so I leaned into it and let things move quickly. I fell completely in love with this guy and saw a real future with him, and he said he felt the same way over and over again. He called me the love of his life and offered me the key to his apartment a week before he went on vacation to Hawaii for a week. 

Fast forward one week, he has a great time in Hawaii, and apparently it ""awakens"" something in him - he no longer wants to settle in Toronto with me; he wants to move around and explore and eventually put down roots somewhere else. He knew I wouldn't want the same (we discussed this early on in our relationship - I want to stay in Toronto to be close to family and work on my career), so we ended things. Now, I don't mind someone figuring out what they truly want in life, but this man confessed that by the time he got back from Hawaii, his feelings for me had died. How can someone go from calling me the love of their life and wanting to settle down with me so badly, to not wanting a life with me at all, in the span of a single week? I genuinely thought that he loved me, but love doesn't disappear so quickly. Either he never really loved me or he only loved the idea of me because I fit into the life he originally thought he wanted. Or, there's something genuinely wrong with him, where he can switch his emotions on and off like a light switch. Whatever the case, I am now deeply hurt and confused by his quick change of heart, and am finding it difficult to trust again.",9.773106060606061,6.50830623484849,9.22967171717172,72.97284090909093,61.14646464646465,12.223232323232324,38.638888888888886,9.978442167317967,3.579058585858585,1583,55,316,23,16,509,194,396,0.08199999999999999,0.753,0.165,0.9927,1,0,2,0,0,0,47.0,5,0,2,3,19,20,0,1,25,0,18,15,1,4,2,74,51,27,1,11,7,0,3,2,0,1,6,1,0,5,17,32,0,1,12,0,0,10,7,6,0,1,15,6,39,14,64,30,6,71,1,1,1,8,57,34,0,3,29,209,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631536098710572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342236752932545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054782327273136346,0.05948586067201045,0.04342975161652391,0.0,0.06062349501352893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778012219026532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454964152304742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753668276908238,0.0,0.07469809974904593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883025884615401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739401440158318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951531675327368,0.16028008174802444,0.12620228012672735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06716261164037071,0.0,0.03602316550242333,0.0,0.1368110471243674,0.0,0.0651158309785197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03722210991777037,0.0,0.040489672726778836,0.0,0.05698042753322715,0.07854688898224232,0.0,0.1410857508906787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442462003391532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626829927450313,0.08042593466872881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285193515552325,0.2516091289976574,0.06961255242296764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5144047672070536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193624735939345,0.0,0.1137327467549384,0.2271636599803384,0.0,0.0,0.05494785402471508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04827685655469973,0.05418436030999935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716200139524746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109140089471838,0.04564080477448567,0.0,0.0,0.2294685534220552,0.0,0.0,0.06776946869066709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207298159338216,0.10969440175001564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593674791716347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05726332145430305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199427415406146,0.0,0.0,0.16967960926634074,0.08308603349326385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756771334382753,0.378194627363898,0.05655026283664296,0.22859092867857064,0.0,0.0,0.06604400894177957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051866564682944906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789425633922352,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FuckTheWorld2302,2020/02/10,"I'm at a low point in life. Any advice? So, I just turned 18 recently and my parents have been kicking me out constantly. The only reason they keep letting me back is because I am so close to finishing school. I plan to be done completely with school on 2/13/20. They refuse to talk to me and honestly I'm fine with it because I've always felt very judged by them and like I can't have my own thoughts or feelings. All my life I have just wanted to make my parents proud but it feels like no matter what I do they are just always mad at me. People say that I'm being emotionally abused because of the things they say to me but I don't know if I'm ready to accept that yet. Today my mom came in my room to help me schedule an appointment to get my IUD and started yelling at cussing at me because I wasn't asking all the right questions. Then the lady on the phone very angrily asked ""Do I just need to talk to your mom or what?"" I almost broke down. Lately I've been cutting myself again and vaping and trying to get high off of different things because I just wanna escape the pain I have built up inside. Ive tried to snort 10mg of Abilify and got no result except stomach problems and I'm considering trying more. Ive slept on the streets a few times when my parents kicked me out. I even tried to go to my best friends house that my mom has kept me from seeing for a long time. When she found out she tried to tell my friend a bunch of awful lies about me and basically ruined my friendship. She's yelling at my dad constantly saying she wants a divorce. I can't do this life anymore. I do online school and rarely leave the house anymore. Im considering attempting suicide again but I'm scared. I don't know what to do anymore.",3.784789915966386,4.691391714285714,4.654830252100839,87.12399327731094,71.63305322128852,7.504717086834733,26.885042016806718,7.699297019823105,1.3584143193277307,1370,45,290,16,25,444,187,357,0.147,0.741,0.11199999999999999,-0.9571,4,0,1,0,4,3,26.0,0,1,5,4,15,17,2,1,14,1,26,6,2,3,2,53,56,21,1,6,12,7,3,2,2,0,4,5,1,0,11,17,0,3,10,0,0,2,7,8,0,0,11,10,52,9,45,42,7,43,0,3,1,0,32,23,0,5,20,186,63,3,0.0,0.0986720068971138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137928303105947,0.0,0.0,0.08339189713884088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13858961241963078,0.0,0.0,0.056632581371786075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24777119535354536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15570926175598693,0.0,0.0,0.06403641684114242,0.0,0.2538305523199968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739618125635606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524899966195244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731645570517375,0.1799900450263525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700883859235269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522333929821732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367767523799528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05500499952891797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842167376551681,0.05949454013678896,0.07996090781657295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131113408038398,0.1286823103894867,0.0,0.08701968919710347,0.0,0.047329379556404615,0.0,0.06660583058313257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055820163786689504,0.08798884455547691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19218558854351425,0.0,0.0,0.08995561966418626,0.0,0.0,0.07402220897569588,0.0,0.0,0.09153593000466394,0.0,0.093942348689101,0.08818044520175113,0.0,0.08515842826543503,0.17646727914859905,0.08137183369569953,0.0,0.0,0.07369930166747697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05558938468182779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926061038619665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061750329396065236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06333743847321446,0.08861473638920787,0.0,0.27741444978062074,0.0,0.0,0.057735178518480174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872558095460916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968676382361048,0.0,0.0,0.0932915485411845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856246905846364,0.08222797379668427,0.0,0.0,0.07111981802038311,0.0,0.1986804298153188,0.08337681540298587,0.2528484072221608,0.06636258740911356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0589453106770812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109371830018648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387302456404562,0.07278952388511271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11065374524220313,0.0,0.0,0.06611423019840547,0.09712131885022708,0.0,0.07893876226621017,0.0,0.0,0.2827049001349104,0.0905836468114329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13742780698616092,0.09824023350615206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwquestionacc,2020/02/10,"Anyone else experience this? I live a very functional life. I work out, go to class, have hobbies, and do all that jazz. I even make friends and try to do ""fulfilling"" things but recently I've been feeling worse and worse each day. It's gotten to the point where I swing from manic and absurdly motivated to completely silent and practically in tears in a matter of minutes or a few hours. Im 20 years old. I dont struggle from anything physically, or financially, and have no history of mental health issues. I dont think I have anything that could even be qualified as an illness, but instead just a spree of mixed emotions about life? Feels weird is all, was wondering if anyone else felt this way. 


Note:
When I started typing this I was feeling horribly down and nearly deleted all my socials, but by the end of it I'm already making plans and excited for the day...",4.475579240037071,6.251622795180726,5.383975903614459,79.20555607043559,71.04819277108435,8.722150139017609,30.84151992585728,9.265573868473778,2.8507382761816507,688,30,127,15,13,225,111,166,0.139,0.768,0.094,-0.8949,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,3,7,4,0,1,8,0,13,4,0,3,3,31,25,16,0,2,7,0,4,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,8,10,0,0,7,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,5,4,10,2,19,18,5,18,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,4,9,84,18,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867446415149402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840833648057875,0.2760872231747517,0.22173748832873705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125857217569016,0.0,0.0,0.10756845221087677,0.0,0.0,0.1737753860386301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157978039166133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22509404376806114,0.15154960816936985,0.11932802812862503,0.0,0.0,0.17797166944601647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178874236379082,0.0,0.0,0.20436587843130066,0.0,0.12935893442788707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408965459652067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656839165200871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320837513350793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326788398103135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14552815148438805,0.14061986135146995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19032316178314607,0.0,0.0,0.11896630485151663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17986247941153874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577300865229408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137319884268354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736045078259933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302654210609968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733708933631292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536038030233036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14084578909444553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950655367634218,0.08632754575996099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147070896915087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111637871425372,0.0,0.10693992767287504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14610555613906134,0.0980827744666216,0.0,0.2745964049825184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675969462012345
mentalhealth,prozacpotatosack,2020/02/10,"I'm really scared right now. Please help me Lately I've been having this terrible thought that no one is real and this world actually is some kind of simulation created by an evil power, by God, who knows I'm writing this and he knows that I am suspicious of him. He controls everything around me, he is testing me, torturing me, I don't know why, for fun? Because I deserve it? 

When I'm around other people they can read my thoughts. His spies are among us, possessing ordinary people around me. I've never been a spiritual or superstitious person but this idea has been growing stronger and stronger every day. 

Why am I letting the internet know this? I'm not sure why I'm writing this.. what if God controls all of you, what if he makes you manipulate me with your comments? 

I don't feel like I can trust anyone. I don't know what to do anymore. I've been thinking a lot about suicide but I don't think I can even kill myself because God won't let me escape after death. He'll be waiting for me. This will never end. Please help me. Dear God, you're such an asshole. Why me??",1.7785688405797089,4.159779606481481,3.368904991948469,87.6361594202899,81.6388888888889,6.349114331723029,24.669082125603857,7.586124646067393,1.3421705314009662,849,33,171,14,23,280,125,216,0.157,0.674,0.16899999999999998,-0.4774,1,0,0,0,0,2,29.0,1,3,1,3,8,11,3,1,5,0,25,0,0,4,4,38,43,9,3,2,6,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,15,7,0,3,11,1,0,1,9,5,0,1,6,1,28,6,15,31,3,15,0,0,0,0,19,6,0,5,9,108,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.11246318627900698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142927745492642,0.08058247838920438,0.0,0.0,0.3077793399680499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14050542743015176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585157213551273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432394739856442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207349024487032,0.0,0.0,0.07611870299859354,0.0,0.0970994792067436,0.0,0.10357541095503173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058271692536912126,0.082331556576585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15449353713303987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009837618780828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750230044916008,0.12001067003636093,0.31668013496036673,0.0,0.13000217798559552,0.0,0.0,0.2356930884275637,0.0,0.0563032314751457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797777942357457,0.0,0.0,0.07692740475792623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777691888335538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780934740900221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15979372580154336,0.10062810669099938,0.0,0.2530103587394701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527689478114275,0.1311748458087791,0.07382935135939532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841920464632456,0.0,0.0,0.1153810581398488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606009904034338,0.0,0.10861771558879632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476895920964132,0.0,0.18298443761670435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13862639648037722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159653033453804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sleepexperiment19,2020/02/10,"Looking for Veterans: Try an app that may improve your sleep Hi everyone! If any of you are Veterans and are interested in trying a new app that may improve sleep, keep reading:   


We are researchers at Brown University and we are looking for ways to improve sleep through a smarter sleep app. For 14 days, contribute to science every time you sleep, and you’ll even be paid up to $50 for your time! In the app, you can select an experiment to try and see if it leads to sleep improvement.

[In this study,](http://sleep.cs.brown.edu/SleepCoacher_Veterans_Poster.pdf) you will spend 30 minutes in an introductory phone interview and answer questionnaires, then use the app for 14 days (leaving daily voicemails), and spend another 30 minutes in a final phone interview about your experience with the app.

**Please call (401) 312 - 3294 if interested!**

Questions: [sleepcoacher@brown.edu](mailto:sleepcoacher@brown.edu)

All participants will be paid following the completion of a survey after using the tool for 14 days. Participants must be over 18 years of age, be a Veteran, and own a smartphone.

Thanks!",7.910666666666664,10.871517622222227,6.527777777777778,69.635,64.44444444444444,9.911111111111113,33.66666666666667,10.203070172399654,3.979733333333334,892,39,134,23,15,266,102,180,0.0,0.884,0.11599999999999999,0.966,0,0,0,0,0,0,52.0,2,8,0,1,2,3,0,0,14,0,15,6,6,3,2,23,25,11,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,4,10,0,1,2,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,10,3,26,13,2,22,0,0,4,0,17,8,0,6,11,82,14,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430869055416595,0.11458119409347267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115789045026548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456958750806212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114141533945762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217310936426245,0.0,0.09206635236718004,0.10441405550434046,0.0,0.2137779197151512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970210817911225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712595272323388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570324461123635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835218774320269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553555502292193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994781553183095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224096208215486,0.0,0.1093015462226901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707561712195505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7654562341174193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060295404786933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274347355151542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22256549604575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188751805407334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673500809837444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036756971173468
mentalhealth,BigPotatoKitty,2020/02/10,"I don't know what's wrong with me I'd start this with mentioning that I've never been at a therapist before, since my parents don't intend to let me visit one so I am not making any assumptions about what might be wrong with me. Also I want to apologize for spelling and grammar mistakes in advance, I'm not a native speaker. I'm from Germany/Hesse

Info about myself 


I've always been the outsider/misfit whenever I was meant to be around people. I was first exposed to others in my age in kindergarten that I attended when I was 5 years old for the very first time and since then I was never really accepted into other groups of people. The only friend I had in preschool till middleschool was extremely toxic and kept bullying me until I was capable of telling teachers about it. It was really hard for me to do so because since she was the only friend I had I didn't want to accept that she's bad for me. I tried getting along with my classmates, but they just kicked me out of their friend group by ignoring me and not intending to spend time with me, although I really tried to talk to them. At the same time I had my parents blaming me for being shy and even if they talked to the teachers about it, they didn't really try to be there for me. I never really had anyone to rely on. I often felt left alone with myself and I don't talk much. A lot of things happened in my family that probably affected me a lot, there's a lot about it, but I'll just mention the things that I really the most. When I was younger I was really close to my step-sister. (she's 16 years older than I am ) and I felt like she was someone who'd be there for me, but then she just left me alone and we didn't talk for at least 8 years now. The other thing is that I saw my eldest step-brother (he's about 20 years older than I am) beating up my dad recently badly and blood was everywhere and I had to call an ambulance and police. I found out that way that my step-brother is a searched criminal apparently and has a large history of physically harming people.  


Things I stuck with and I don't know what is going on with me:


I've always been extremely shy and insecure about meeting new people,and I get extremely nervous and scared around strangers. I don't like being hugged or touched by strangers and my it was really hard for me to let one of my friends hug me. 


I'm extremely scared of hospitals, syringes and everything about it. I had to give blood three times yet and each of these times I was crying and shaking without having any control about it. 


I react really unusually to screams. 
Any kind of screams,but screams of pain of fear are the worst for me. My body kinda goes numb and I feel like I can't move or I'm feeling like I'm about to pass out. If a baby is screaming it causes me to react completely differently. I get really angry, to a point where it's really hard for me to control myself and I might even try to break things and might as well hurt myself in the process. 


I hope I can find some help here. 
If there are any further questions about it I'll try to answer them as good as I can.
Thanks a lot for your attention.


Sincerely, potato",3.796907685003056,4.870670032761313,4.976546496642474,84.20258410771214,71.7613104524181,8.319622871871397,26.57128806891406,8.716276077567194,1.8305742793189983,2485,81,508,44,46,822,264,641,0.175,0.733,0.092,-0.9955,4,2,0,0,0,2,50.0,1,1,6,6,33,38,0,6,22,0,58,7,3,9,3,100,86,43,0,7,15,3,8,4,4,3,2,4,0,0,32,40,0,4,15,0,1,7,16,20,1,5,33,13,90,18,95,41,11,62,0,1,1,2,38,24,0,18,33,371,122,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806213177331635,0.0,0.04944066677676175,0.10288511680177144,0.0,0.0,0.16816988365851607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043228810030275455,0.0,0.0,0.11007301574469698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324099104798427,0.037687364250975935,0.0,0.05260770908652407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686725772154699,0.0,0.0,0.0631292627047381,0.0,0.0,0.06351032485161646,0.0,0.0,0.06482133535912113,0.0,0.13868184786182478,0.0,0.0,0.06791081084770932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459296887457544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166839783170504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05556346557569541,0.0,0.05828220781199305,0.06956923919230487,0.06252018992650557,0.08833422078571562,0.11872155779430535,0.0,0.05650605746634652,0.10517500288327668,0.0,0.06778687472418249,0.19106041648571365,0.0,0.09690153609769753,0.05930725782388725,0.03513602974133373,0.051855076066679315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05467079917768745,0.0,0.16614660361779854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041439354442368535,0.0,0.0,0.061405226845119724,0.0,0.0,0.06618391928511576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438022955251947,0.06795375703608389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13434401246209246,0.12643855027483306,0.0,0.1208164229337365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102423702300703,0.0,0.0,0.04126803038175127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967566266165946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06570917615691622,0.04544778694108127,0.0,0.14304754545160628,0.059710048305536674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06487393573237872,0.0,0.08378714637533588,0.0940399448626879,0.06578514323394143,0.0,0.1372965720872717,0.0,0.0,0.12858302613891062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058443706208496336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665677752172185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925707995499326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4356667324222513,0.0,0.061043786332477874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379330949165505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342446770189475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052383313048008084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04375937754674876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19876730338452514,0.05403694069213203,0.056919274689684086,0.0,0.07178248180714725,0.2053657432370619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802504902674855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20987234297722465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05101131219983008,0.07293084757542814,0.04907304957282125,0.0,0.0,0.055587241591607404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959617357758476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13518977670589655,0.0,0.15925063304848547
mentalhealth,scorpiontank27,2020/02/10,"Sorry for interrupting you Sorry for interrupting you but I would like to know what's the best way to self medicate for  depression,I been having depression episodes for a while and I am in a country where mental health isn't cheap nor is cared for and I tried finding people to help but it always return ,again sorry for interrupting you",5.208281249999999,7.1526745156250024,5.811375000000003,76.19612500000002,69.46875,8.870000000000003,26.8625,9.3871,2.4506287500000004,275,9,48,6,5,89,43,64,0.23600000000000002,0.597,0.16699999999999998,-0.0511,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,3,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,0,6,2,0,0,0,7,8,6,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,6,3,10,6,1,6,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,36,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17348896301469016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21880821502985068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125799649048304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795810140547968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905655087659124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216260827880242,0.0,0.0,0.13975336479534292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458631926186838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186272116647532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21004212998615365,0.210119275691103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445478643855468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21751129867115207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7001970906413281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14155802619628344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16549784355613734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481126401777561,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RubinGirly,2020/02/10,"Advise? Been thinking about suicide a little too much lately and I don’t really know if I’m exaggerating So I’m a 14 year old female from Germany, I’ve been having these breakdowns, and while having these, I think about suicide a lot, with having kind of a plan at one point but I don’t really know if I had any intention to even try and complete it (the plan was to get out through the window, get my bike from the garage and ride out onto the fields, just laying down somewhere and falling asleep, freezing to death in my sleep, my teacher said something about how if you got drunk and blacked out outside  you wouldn’t survive the night, and told us to take care of our friends when drinking, and that evening, that plan was somehow formed. I start feeling worthless when coming to school, mainly because I have no motivation to do homework and no goals to work towards, and when I tell the teachers I have no homework, I feel like a failure, and keep telling myself that for the rest of the lesson, and then start thinking that I should just kill myself, that it would all be easier, I am completely fine for a week, and then I am in such a bad state for the next two, I’m scared that I’ll hurt myself one day, but I don’t really want to talk to my mom, she’s had such a hard time with my borderline abusive dad (none of us had contact with him since I was eleven) I have talked to my mom as far as telling her I need help, and talked to someone from the caritas ( a help Organisation, just look it up, they do too much to just sum it up) but as soon as that lady I was talking to said that she wasn’t going to talk to my mom unless I was at risk of harming myself or others, I knew I wouldn’t be able to be honest, I just don’t know what to do, if I can get through this til I’m 18 and just tell my mom I’m taking a vacation but just go to the mental hospital or just therapy, without stressing my mom out, she has also offered me to see a therapist but I know that they too, will talk to my mom once I mention any of this, and I wouldn’t be able to be honest, I’ve been keeping kind of a digital diary for the past two weeks, I’ve been playing with the thought to just send one of these texts to one of my teachers, but I never really do it, I just don’t know what to do?",10.116267110617834,5.0123446666666664,9.700949562214824,75.48736958934519,62.501048218029354,12.649105931680849,39.79886545813294,8.841846274778883,3.3140243926501416,1774,56,396,17,17,580,211,477,0.141,0.768,0.091,-0.9797,0,0,2,0,0,5,44.0,3,2,2,8,28,17,1,3,25,0,44,4,2,3,2,78,82,43,4,11,24,7,4,1,1,6,0,2,3,0,22,25,2,2,14,4,0,6,15,8,0,7,19,9,55,9,69,52,8,44,0,2,3,0,40,16,0,8,22,290,77,7,0.14102355932500552,0.08354492872852894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05638824472089912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590085624491088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05887439073918568,0.04298332641558456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189145872969163,0.0,0.0,0.0607396546395868,0.14786051886677234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045474264588325305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06907469995437332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314473090930182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130574887857115,0.05037362947981173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05447722605521753,0.0,0.11051848382182954,0.0,0.08014693865360059,0.0,0.056394711569761835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316470465260904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452511916650183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548431848802384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534821916921354,0.07801083700725568,0.14685433574700288,0.19375715030082533,0.0,0.07954035873624384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0344484938555343,0.07067132733100268,0.0,0.0,0.05921213607100183,0.0,0.0,0.05994659354395731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105928935223182,0.0,0.0,0.4954952647952188,0.0,0.0,0.10366854248258286,0.052283591168229865,0.054383031389053565,0.0,0.07499007760977107,0.06617052861430762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07399025139775538,0.07509274408502603,0.19112242703405088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731147226203325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665642320240718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18068660643642967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414569898821965,0.0,0.07059459232158292,0.07136168546270638,0.056188759200126656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058328072785448035,0.0,0.07056270242649493,0.0,0.059744402088664876,0.054283412878065415,0.0,0.0,0.0998172011345153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077100536896145,0.0,0.0,0.15425688485167274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060321660138994,0.3400481853238645,0.2465216134300872,0.0,0.08063636520660357,0.08186961088310839,0.0,0.13554330380056995,0.0,0.05597847680980842,0.0411159857619167,0.0,0.0,0.06737702718345455,0.0,0.047872869876061735,0.0,0.13775952593591154,0.0,0.16963397809510108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04158967454216028,0.0,0.1131205928805522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797083937592759,0.0,0.05133341538554465,0.0,0.0,0.0500895451904502,0.0,0.0,0.045407274283145636
mentalhealth,kokotalik,2020/02/10,"School is getting harder Hi, I'm in high school in central europe, meaning after 9th grade I changed schools and went to a profession specific high school, something like leaving high school and going to college for yall american people.

It's been getting hard to wake up in the morning again. Recently, I had a three week streak of going to school everyday, but i ruined it with a panic attack last week on thursday.

On top of that, I have 87 missed classes from this year so far, meaning i need to take a test from 6 classes about everything we've learned and it can potentially get me kicked out of this school.

I dont know what to do. Studying is hard and makes me feel worse. I cry when i study because i feel so bad. Its hard to wake up as well again. I've already been hospitalized because of this once, i dont want to do it again.",4.1016071428571435,5.2202326130952414,4.690238095238096,86.37142857142858,71.08333333333333,7.504761904761906,30.07142857142857,7.793537801064563,1.8440142857142856,661,27,135,8,12,211,103,168,0.205,0.757,0.038,-0.9837,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,1,8,7,1,1,5,0,11,2,2,1,0,16,28,9,0,2,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,6,0,0,3,2,5,1,1,4,5,13,2,27,24,0,28,0,2,0,0,2,13,0,0,13,79,23,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780258417812554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113569444935384,0.0,0.0,0.08156649441994884,0.1191009948539167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334233817659684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10730712128653157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289822904981076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779685392067857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878930202063428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15311589947298626,0.0,0.11103817368446736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625313042682035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096423625964653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536874906743402,0.07962982709862045,0.0,0.10343887540525266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04772606300574254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520837383846705,0.0,0.0,0.2128245971382551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243538648528006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403592826164408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11461735843002747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772546819886655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645640954659976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6920675886761194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520600447874365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345020448552535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05761968682612181,0.0,0.15672094593467528,0.0,0.08783442284072725,0.0905589702487976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955375400907784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290871358395501
mentalhealth,sleepypsi,2020/02/10,"Dermatitis on Lamictal? Hey Reddit - looking for people with experience being on Lamictal. I took it for several years with no adverse side effects. When I was bumped up to 300 mg, I ended up getting a dermatitis-like rash on my arm in a very small area. My psychiatrist quickly yanked me off of it and the withdrawals were horrible. I had taken it for several years at that point so it was a huge adjustment. There was no definitive proof the rash was the dreaded Stevens-Johnson Syndrome, but my psych said it wasn’t worth the risk.

That was 2018 and my new psychiatrist said he would feel comfortable with me going back on Lamictal at a lower dose. I’ve been on it now for about 2 months. Today, I suddenly got another dermatitis-like rash in a similar spot. I do have a history of struggling with dermatitis from environmental allergens, but I can’t think of anything that could have caused it today.

Has anyone else ever gotten a rash like this while on Lamictal and it turned out to be fine? I’m terrified my psychiatrist will take me off of it again and it helps me so much that I would absolutely hate that. The year and a half without it was dreadful. I’m seeing my psych in a couple weeks, but I’m going to reach out to him today to see what he thinks. In the meantime, I wanted to see if anyone else had experienced something similar and how it ended up working out for you!",4.954721131186176,6.235307119402987,6.1140377062058135,76.35099371563237,69.22388059701493,9.821209740769836,30.89630793401414,10.064110947511567,3.181534328358209,1100,45,205,28,19,368,144,268,0.146,0.7759999999999999,0.077,-0.961,1,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,0,2,11,9,1,4,15,0,22,6,5,3,2,31,45,15,0,5,5,0,1,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,19,13,0,0,5,0,1,3,5,6,0,1,17,8,21,3,42,22,1,48,0,0,4,0,8,26,0,1,20,144,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988586156439924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17322205559924134,0.2538337592505986,0.10193238858004547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524645252844828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272460312331952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988981101243233,0.13705701967644132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20695078409478126,0.0,0.2194196574223797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204523460842587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12116617174977215,0.0,0.0,0.06263112382656112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471565013321548,0.0,0.14079349612277833,0.0,0.09906814580978086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229350021473953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302576631400849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06051539793737125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401749324906363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098869847302346,0.0,0.09105685618985207,0.0,0.0,0.11963199195364428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587411993434396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709481384270908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23565269326150115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961190527106186,0.0,0.0,0.2798700083345034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535924402067886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294931931632016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313293561398596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15873856975452325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3522356860547719,0.0,0.13762133704650087,0.0,0.1347322576977114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220365020319434,0.07306025382587954,0.0,0.0993590274481364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940383838611812,0.0,0.09017700665138204,0.0,0.0,0.17598381934570764,0.0,0.0,0.2392998037028376
mentalhealth,exokkir,2020/02/10,"Upvote helpful posts! I notice that compared with other subs I post in, comments rarely get upvoted here. I don't mean my own posts necessarily, just every thread is full of comments sitting at one vote. Please upvote helpful posts! The ratio of new posts to comments here is insane (no pun intended) and I bet y'all would get more contributions if we collectively agreed to upvote good comments.",5.6484976525821615,8.116784577464793,5.810915492957751,74.47768779342726,69.4225352112676,7.550234741784037,30.143192488262912,8.344100000000001,2.5381812206572767,319,13,50,5,6,101,54,71,0.036000000000000004,0.785,0.179,0.8684,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,9,7,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,7,1,7,6,3,10,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,2,1,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470752241889781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824019011702732,0.0,0.0,0.1464135375060816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23400920164782904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19014817174814705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685921622375219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19873892701191356,0.0,0.0,0.11828709384765132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19161562728112436,0.0,0.0,0.8359062252702725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400317063100814,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pubgcommando,2020/02/10,"Pictures, man... I'm aware they can't see me, I know the nature of reality, and I know these are manifestations of my insecurity. Yet, for whatever reason, I can't convince myself that they are inanimate, that these are the creations of other regular people. I know that, but I don't think that, you know? It's been eating away at me for years, it's kept me in the house, it's kept liquor in my stomach, it's kept me from enjoying life. My brain finds ANY reason to cling onto this delusion, and yet the only thing it has running for it left - it's last ammunition - is the changes in expression I notice ""in reaction"" to my thoughts, which I know is just me reading too much into pixel rendering. Maybe my social cue process is so good I'm finding cues where there are none, pointing out anything that could be ever so slightly perceived as a reaction - I've always been good at reading stuff. Guess it turned on me.

I know there's plenty of people here who's heads are harder right now, and I pray to that piece of shit partial no-less-human-than-anyone-else God who's letting all of this happen that you get better, but I don't know where else to vent. I know the mindset I need to be in - it's just ignoring my artificial insecurities, but it's staying in that mentality that I am not strong enough to do.

Where I come from, there was always emphasis on ""looking tough"", being a criminal, doing that rap shit. Back in the day, I had genuine insecurities over the fact that I was involved in less bad shit than my peers, and even when I felt compelled to do more evil to ""catch up"", then threw that shit life in the garbage, my brain continuously reminds me of how much of a goodie goodie I am (laughable) as though the pictures are in my head and would judge me negatively for that as my peers would have, if I was who my brain was insecure about being (a total pussy), I'd feel GOOD, so I have no clue where this insecurity comes from. 

I don't hear them, I don't see direct movement, and any communication I perceive I quickly identify as an intrusive thought, but I can only be self-aware for so long, and that's what scares me. What a life.",7.2653923541247485,5.901207967136156,7.694668008048289,76.02669014084508,64.39906103286386,10.555600268276327,33.90073775989269,9.48565724429506,2.8384146210596914,1678,58,342,26,21,555,208,426,0.15,0.777,0.073,-0.9893,0,0,0,0,0,0,67.0,0,2,3,2,26,21,5,6,16,0,40,15,10,4,4,53,70,24,0,5,8,0,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,38,11,2,4,19,4,0,6,10,14,0,0,14,6,51,7,50,47,9,47,1,0,3,0,13,27,4,2,13,245,89,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487317258993224,0.0,0.0,0.1184005293332648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163870152269601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179087158727948,0.06693978507550535,0.07268714066422073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699291623464782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29154591864322865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920924593490268,0.14998004277419374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950619220299603,0.0,0.0,0.0561431587696004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907881687272387,0.14544626745415296,0.0,0.0,0.08995090306028064,0.0,0.05749888935350921,0.07874607110624318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044017534057083564,0.0,0.08358628180215022,0.0,0.1591330616161132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04548255180050032,0.0,0.0,0.21905236495419186,0.0,0.0,0.09590070184111303,0.0,0.07698229220226993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17868672679487904,0.0,0.09811711212402488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044957718064317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38274443096334815,0.07096129954518927,0.0,0.0,0.09458531957223587,0.08901945434575882,0.18446818734987305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704077862561008,0.07310412574269329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745827035609552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773078575923922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279906226676388,0.06455004795737605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911249262864984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324182309933999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070570565840698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229494604794972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741567619237948,0.0,0.0,0.17901371337222222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434434291824385,0.0,0.0,0.08715706434982952,0.0,0.13874284531692882,0.0,0.09081716601758084,0.0,0.3574420979216533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874142866066617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09278885797537847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965694429680938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783535595603333,0.055781215260416885,0.08553092129197021,0.13822361019645066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469064866566676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236824966289393,0.0,0.0,0.05606045160822517
mentalhealth,Notnotmark,2020/02/10,"Am I depressed? I've been feeling down for awhile, but I don't really know how long. I am also uninterested in things I previously was and I'm feeling sad but I don't want to cry. Am I depressed or something?",-0.2078787878787871,2.0803751818181797,3.0927272727272737,85.95075757575759,92.63636363636364,5.660606060606061,23.24242424242424,7.1686216300943375,1.1327242424242423,164,7,35,3,6,59,30,44,0.272,0.59,0.138,-0.7971,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,1,0,9,12,6,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,2,6,0,4,10,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27091130940961106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721189031064756,0.0,0.0,0.5835578823086046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425808675680762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861771138835138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997975391517228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21702238376436772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607988692467452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250612948221021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19981315687168905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,desufnoc_yob,2020/02/10,"Issues with bad memories flooding back at inconvenient times Some days, I'll either be minding my own business, enjoying something, or even trying to fall asleep, and out of nowhere, detailed memories of things I've done that could be called ""cringey"" or ""dumb"" just come flooding back and they make me feel like shit. I struggle with depression and anxiety, sure, but those pale in comparison to the feelings I get when I remember shit like ""Some of the dumb stuff I did/said around my first girlfriend,"" ""The way I tried to force being the class clown in 9th grade by imitating Caboose from RvB,"" ""The times I zoned out in a restaurant and caught myself staring at someone."" The list could go on, but you get the point, right? I've done stupid shit that I want to forget, but as soon as I even think about something vaguely similar, I'll be forcefully dragged down the rabbit hole of bad memories that make me physically curl up and groan.",13.236379310344825,8.354169074712647,11.046436781609199,67.51724137931036,56.528735632183896,14.588505747126437,46.81609195402299,11.538034831475384,5.11799540229885,745,31,139,13,6,226,112,174,0.203,0.743,0.054000000000000006,-0.9827,0,0,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,1,1,9,14,6,1,9,0,8,4,4,2,1,32,19,13,0,3,7,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,11,0,0,4,0,0,4,0,10,0,1,3,3,15,4,26,10,4,26,0,1,1,0,4,13,5,4,10,86,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692934322937976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443153777188655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21496041509857572,0.2334166133321947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272837322773932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040587004752736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232017911474392,0.0,0.0,0.09014487199537392,0.0,0.12039008648434077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860816593951189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18464333444148132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413513261486214,0.09985701632579723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11889460150962765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460558650397521,0.0,0.079438728599085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458913105072037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657637334668665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18660502563601786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411353474991182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321348413580085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583405681652051,0.11936915240996472,0.1329603345265265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4304385369792227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11843295383616854,0.21521497267364376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14612570765555713,0.16001170372248955,0.0,0.0,0.13173856355712205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286190648550537,0.08956372636659303,0.0,0.0,0.16301067458815582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897993850410372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244434345167645,0.1109488093914852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Billywhiskerino,2020/02/10,Therapy When was the moment you decided that therapy is unavoidable and you gotta start seeing a therapist? Sometimes I think I need it when it’s bad and the moment it gets better I forget about the whole thing and I am not sure about it.,2.1118750000000013,4.514094770833335,3.8873333333333338,84.29100000000003,80.45833333333334,8.006666666666666,22.1,8.841846274778883,1.8463700000000005,191,6,37,5,5,64,33,48,0.156,0.7829999999999999,0.061,-0.5365,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,2,0,1,4,3,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,9,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,6,2,2,7,1,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,5,28,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232934540550166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365207111835893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397214967869697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19829646669420267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21310763412301614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644957888092536,0.0,0.18928881756219532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25205025871103043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6116605975317587,0.31050764121219177,0.1776690660811883,0.17135878661706638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985768128685836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fluorescent-,2020/02/10,help I am depressed but I wouldn’t consider myself suicidal simply because I know i’m too weak to ever go through with it however I often think about killing myself just to spite people who have annoyed me every time something inconvenient happens and I feel like such a shitty person and pure evil when those thoughts enter my head but I don’t know what to do about it so I thought i’d share it here and see if anyone relates just to know that i’m not alone or something idk,4.316205357142857,5.622442614583335,4.877321428571428,84.52125000000002,70.77083333333334,7.152380952380952,29.339285714285715,7.447530270364453,1.730216071428571,385,15,74,4,7,123,70,96,0.34600000000000003,0.568,0.086,-0.9888,1,1,2,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,0,11,8,4,0,1,0,5,2,1,0,2,22,17,9,2,2,7,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,7,0,0,2,3,6,0,0,2,2,11,2,8,14,0,5,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,3,4,49,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22889014669697505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452887645006566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472001773791534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19034763880150746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999078484056495,0.18620267985843905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117446293111166,0.15788299377832415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12559983018366225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954302504657999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268105480717777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813215719587192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24450460729248294,0.0,0.3643687294882452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796981272206488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321410687208675,0.19296934739526075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17610900010214048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3402743787254233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24173897178742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14160836937651652,0.0,0.3508998496693623,0.12886732584635313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nikkioliver,2020/02/10,"Online Therapy? For those who have tried in the past or are currently doing online therapy, do you feel like it 'works' for you? Is it better than going in person? What sites or programs can you suggest? I'm currently unemployed and would love to try online therapy, but it's hard to see if it's ""worth"" it, ya know?

I'm currently traveling abroad in Europe and will be going home to the states soon. After getting home, I'll then be moving cross country. I've been wanting to start therapy again for so long. I feel like starting online therapy would help a lot during my move and transition. I miss going to therapy. I haven't been in at least three months. I no longer have a car so it's going to be so difficult to go around and find the right fit for a new therapist once I'm back home.

I would love to hear anyone's experience with online therapy. Thanks ♥️",2.1987555253315207,4.437316063583818,3.998476708602517,84.52091125467528,79.11560693641619,7.770010200612037,22.89323359401564,8.671277953709913,1.7326330499829994,681,22,134,16,17,229,102,173,0.059000000000000004,0.7909999999999999,0.15,0.9538,5,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,4,0,2,7,8,0,0,6,0,17,2,0,0,0,19,38,12,0,5,4,0,3,2,0,4,0,1,3,1,9,6,0,0,4,1,1,10,2,2,0,1,2,5,10,6,21,29,2,34,0,1,1,2,11,9,0,4,16,82,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402699761260296,0.0,0.0,0.08151559933481717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041071493524717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809851162640624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957180611341134,0.0,0.0,0.0925998205446866,0.1308334635951606,0.0,0.0,0.08369217667480447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0478408914181663,0.0,0.26020314817701057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202761218524256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320463389958448,0.0,0.0613766015324302,0.0,0.27555276061553874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050323789117368636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947172981773012,0.0,0.0,0.08103546039292929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784847493697551,0.16528874012855724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308930095866442,0.1946461751770859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843766732485843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751772803512596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741273109237457,0.0,0.0799542986968806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781992103852779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296843663223859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296256621337685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430420041900638,0.7330179046511474,0.10631837397499712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433833819013895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05400961997712539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666313905127225,0.0,0.0,0.19514343382183694,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tinysquiid,2020/02/10,"I’m attached to people who aren’t real I’ve recently played, and beaten, a choose-your-own-story game in which I became rather attached to the characters. Post finishing the game, I’ve been finding myself sad and thinking about them a lot. I guess I’m sad because I no longer get to “interact” with them, as I found them to be a lot more nice/entertaining/helpful/attentive to me than anyone I know in real life. I feel lonely, and very stupid. 

I’ve been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and bipolar disorder for 9 years now, and lately I’ve been in a bad place mentally. Reading and playing this game helped me cope with it and kind of escape. I regret finding the game because now I feel like I’ve lost friends",5.456920634920639,6.1525520571428585,6.1538095238095245,78.64896825396826,67.71428571428572,9.365079365079367,31.984126984126984,9.444778638647367,2.901174603174603,568,23,106,11,9,186,86,140,0.24100000000000002,0.679,0.079,-0.9715,1,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,3,2,4,14,2,0,7,0,5,3,0,0,0,24,15,8,0,2,1,0,2,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,4,10,0,0,7,7,0,0,2,9,0,0,5,2,14,5,16,9,3,11,0,6,0,0,11,4,0,3,7,60,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300523924035289,0.0,0.0,0.11887056470631364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14194601815454094,0.2072653985926756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642396835234994,0.17255021307049714,0.0,0.0,0.19483900941587406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171917993507219,0.12145070267185536,0.0,0.0,0.31076066889871873,0.0,0.0,0.18640032127871106,0.1313444644021788,0.0,0.08881993519888973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18727828113993392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394992043915968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770327297344143,0.09342960709695314,0.0,0.19177161858388228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007866605300528,0.08305523798753621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18557915967948466,0.2890621932102612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17132378016656466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785918478960575,0.0,0.17761772023797706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628165853195705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700497410124399,0.3870029393050329,0.0,0.0,0.1678581794888921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089315293143039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140270886090945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947683192674956
mentalhealth,jotodd,2020/02/10,"Why do I keep destroying myself I just quit a very very good job, well paid, good career progression, good benefits etc.

I don't know why i quit, I had no reason to quit, it's a very stressful job at times, maybe the stress got.tje better of me. I don't know why I quit.

Well I kind of do. The industry I work in is all about reputation and as it was my first time.in this position I was making a few mistakes here and there.

My boss however wasn't angry with me and overall it was going well, but my colleague seemed to like trying to embarrass me in front of my managers and other colleagues aswell. I think this got to me and I was so obsessed by it and worried about my reputation that I quit. I didn't look at the bigger picture and it was so stupid of me. I feel so stupid. People would kill to be in my position.

I don't know why I did it, I was overcome with emotion and wasn't thinking clearly
 I thought I was stronger than that. Why did I let one person destroy my life?

Now I'm back to square one. Looking for a new job and all I'm getting is lower positions etc. 

I am in a bad place and it's all my own stupid fault.

I despise myself.

What should I do? Why am I like this?",1.7724056156327066,3.228559896414346,3.5040978941377365,91.228432934927,77.52589641434263,6.533940428761146,24.701384936444697,7.2636822038024595,0.915191083285904,918,32,208,11,21,307,121,251,0.239,0.662,0.099,-0.9929,5,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,9,13,25,7,4,8,0,27,1,0,3,4,33,45,15,1,3,2,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,14,12,0,1,9,0,1,2,7,14,3,3,16,4,40,11,24,25,7,15,0,0,3,0,1,8,0,1,7,146,54,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06753744853255927,0.07333611866323493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768033780962835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879926894927492,0.0,0.0,0.19591197475763875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04441053907713061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470992300208695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04588863704732415,0.0,0.04991699557141575,0.22100814646091,0.1404946771502222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614793622440735,0.07806918899544753,0.0971731839251898,0.09146359611824076,0.1448106436898113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981425335458934,0.06203839612463579,0.08582063615234026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751365348113546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586285959162765,0.0,0.08823913052990727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482877088785604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903458203301386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608917056896404,0.07669158505439751,0.09176583026009204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4671011466180442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030600740547344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995902755668204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20122270345107515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255850165890524,0.0,0.06972886116304014,0.10243118520409188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596322173682171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174119953719934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23691476636228714,0.0,0.4755287487294622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394280084834557,0.08919774145458448,0.0,0.06239339012691296,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,depressed_potatoe,2020/02/10,"Different realities Does anybody here experience this? Depending on what I do throughout the day I constantly shift from one perception of reality to another. It makes it very difficult to make decisions and be consistent.

I want to keep my favorite one, but things I need to do throughout my day affect me to the point of making myself an ""earlier version of myself"" and I get slight memory loss because things that happened, haven't happened yet. They are in ""the future"". And the memories are very blurry. I barely recognise certain people because in this situation I haven't met them yet.

How do I stick to the reality I like while still doing the things that trigger the reality shift?",7.401048387096775,8.607414266129036,8.059838709677418,64.88475806451615,63.596774193548384,11.683870967741935,38.08064516129032,11.45678717892309,5.030229032258065,555,28,86,17,8,185,78,124,0.055999999999999994,0.87,0.07400000000000001,0.2747,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,1,5,4,0,0,8,0,9,0,0,7,1,17,19,6,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,16,2,13,17,1,12,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,9,68,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19346502109404948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22493977062770906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19937966033565807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23797531505734995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19276391293977924,0.0,0.0,0.16145776436372167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804770410814291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639397596735312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3263066354326995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399265726844547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013769934199904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3694668547199373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368048960574449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500448341479635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790952167102124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744127525292771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20738646372671496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14734245944583746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677221060425109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30446472163017063,0.10882326511382656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,biggdom,2020/02/10,"Need Advice on satisfaction I’m looking for advice on how to keep myself up and going because whatever I do I’m never satisfied with myself. I do a lot on a daily basis to make sure I hit the goals I set out for myself. I’ve learned to play multiple instruments, am graduating a year early from high school with high grades, dropped 30lbs, quit smoking, and work a full time job yet I always feel unfulfilled. Are they any tips you have to keep me going so I can stay on track because there is days where I just want to stop and give all of it up as it seems easier to just mope around and do nothing but I know I’ll feel even worse.",3.7889228159457176,4.563777137404582,5.0393384223918565,84.85805767599663,71.51908396946564,8.264970313825277,25.242578456318913,8.515128840125781,1.4805209499575906,499,14,106,8,9,166,90,131,0.09,0.843,0.067,-0.6015,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,3,9,2,0,0,5,0,8,0,0,2,3,27,24,8,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,3,5,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,14,2,21,23,3,24,0,0,1,0,3,12,0,2,7,67,16,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34245110379478977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579928693117408,0.0,0.0,0.11915741500274987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598531356932274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213628209984716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300411757863688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573291199752055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17719567986978546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16808953849420474,0.1991661472960793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3702647137865668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388144919192494,0.3114918960318301,0.0,0.0,0.09629778949703928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714290043444891,0.0,0.0,0.14896803646208415,0.0,0.0,0.11696248378287825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12992537949310495,0.13514251476095465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813086461085178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863708636798839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773346829825963,0.0,0.15951612549699098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867640376215288,0.0,0.14649398671366765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651452799956688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217374005854823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335086261573344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756418076149312,0.0,0.17856685657666987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283764583045836
mentalhealth,Nicksiee,2020/02/10,"It's not fair (vent) This whole situation makes me feel really selfish but I need to get it out.

I have been mentally unwell for a long time now, and I always seem to be on waiting lists for this and that. Never getting any help other than drugs that don't really do anything.

Recently, my brother in law has been going through a hard time and got diagnosed with depression and anxiety. This is in the last few months. The other day he rang my mum to tell her that he was to start a treatment course for his anxiety and his addiction problems. Through the health service or something, not privately.

I'm so upset about this. I'm getting worse and worse and keep getting fobbed off by professionals who try and stress how overwhelmed the health services are and I just need to hang in there and do what I can for myself while I wait. Meanwhile, he gets treatment at breakneck speed. I'm happy for him, I don't want him to suffer.

But it's not fair.",3.761935483870968,5.522201645161289,4.344924731182797,85.99738709677419,72.87096774193549,7.540645161290323,27.45376344086021,8.238735603445708,1.7972047311827968,750,28,148,12,15,238,117,186,0.225,0.7440000000000001,0.031,-0.9896,0,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,3,7,0,13,5,0,2,1,32,33,16,0,4,7,2,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,14,12,0,3,2,0,0,2,6,7,0,0,4,3,16,1,24,28,2,21,0,3,0,0,13,7,0,2,12,99,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845144327430302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209416902942404,0.0,0.0,0.0988420415823278,0.0,0.2223825834001626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196095246310845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373783149310616,0.0,0.12518854806171054,0.14752578341582456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685582468464624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349262636107867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.379693258269276,0.0,0.08260496676760226,0.0,0.11624856428323255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472630210838792,0.13020380856380412,0.0,0.0,0.308997559267275,0.0,0.0,0.09742411199509668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12919252628728872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847851964646637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12862894933541574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702132834429812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464772163248893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601587680735033,0.0,0.0,0.2155483108149137,0.11210181139993984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907899362218382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18622808769454566,0.0,0.14351422111391746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231991906724008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337793174961127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11189646397362876,0.0,0.0,0.10287849693409698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664963459958465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12704109493752447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950789110784106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098682167818625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573037825634287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227653657987573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29624530982934544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goatsareill,2020/02/10,"Went through non organic psychosis last year and it cost me friends and my job 😖 So last year around March to May I started having the strangest thoughts and even started to see things at night. I also started to believe that all my coworkers were against me, plotting something and for some reason thought they were in a cult and I would be their next victim. I even thought my family was in a cult too and might hurt me somehow. I became heavily paranoid, in a way that it started to show and I struggled to continue with my normal routines. I eventually sought help on my own, and received treatment. Eventually the treatment worked, but the damage had already been done and there was no way to explain my irrational behaviour to anyone other than my close family and S.O.. I still feel guilty at times for my behaviour, and how I treated those around me in fear. 

Has anyone else here gone through something similar? 😖",5.4467476383265865,7.291684578947367,5.135321637426902,81.67331983805671,68.70760233918128,8.068556005398111,34.791273054430945,8.617729084823388,3.002627170490328,737,37,130,12,13,226,106,171,0.14400000000000002,0.8340000000000001,0.022000000000000002,-0.965,1,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,1,12,7,1,2,6,0,13,0,0,2,1,30,25,15,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,7,15,0,0,6,1,1,3,1,5,0,0,12,2,23,2,23,9,3,29,0,2,1,0,6,10,0,4,14,98,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499811903542575,0.1086879936940765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19006429072600575,0.1392569013437225,0.0,0.2419792454492297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531251781766328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908416089054987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353621759681284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17953589397604544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562496280136802,0.15293768315820808,0.06872069544659136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500451701001008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910982919113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14549555802695993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348707160638599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215712424151365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14418011451673815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454291178438272,0.1275432855263188,0.13316394308478144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973916464132527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830348658393156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20926188661437192,0.0,0.0,0.3847940783107098,0.0,0.10853871623865524,0.0,0.0,0.14208370768530107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029324263248166,0.0,0.0,0.3236945057231133,0.07925080880484772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157596832827036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259908772940755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894484134654444,0.0,0.0,0.09654728922216403,0.0,0.0,0.17504448189083624
mentalhealth,roboter5123,2020/02/10,"Just found out my crush is in a relationship So i had a really bad year untkll now. This satturday i had a noose around my neck and wagert my life on a round of cs:go. And an hour ago i found out my crush is in a relationship.


And i could be happier after hearing that. It's just so freeing that i can finally give her up and stop beaing scared almost every day when going to work. Its so freeing that i might not kill myself this year.",2.54795031055901,3.677874043478262,4.542236024844723,85.9058695652174,74.8695652173913,8.300621118012423,21.838509316770182,8.841846274778883,1.2212900621118017,340,8,76,7,7,117,62,92,0.127,0.718,0.155,0.6969,1,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,1,8,5,1,1,6,0,8,2,1,0,0,16,13,8,1,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,7,7,0,1,2,0,2,1,1,3,0,0,4,2,12,4,10,6,0,18,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,2,10,55,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16977362109367497,0.0,0.19178266134257385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704961128235067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599137403353628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529155648451712,0.0,0.0,0.12351651792939845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16136642339594912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20980413118554372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41999026056425415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18372635387127445,0.21769391709383168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158603880587137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886116172130307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118918697228992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352783887330392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20317568166571995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269456507734874,0.0,0.0,0.4112481437047537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917479767324477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601218391345457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13943105576849055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24666911972708025
mentalhealth,solitary_style,2020/02/10,"Running on empty I feel like my cup is completely empty but I keep trying to pour out of it.

Some context – I'm (26F) trying to balance a full-time job, 20 hour/week freelance side gig, paying basically all of the bills while my boyfriend gets back on his feet (he's working too, just was out of a job for a while and now very behind on bills), and trying not to completely lose it. I feel like I go to therapy and every week she tells me what I need to do for self-care and that I need to listen to my gut and make time for healthy habits and daily rituals. And then I just...don't do it. 

My anxiety is driving me through my life and it's getting completely exhausting. I'm on medication and experimenting with dosages and I'm going to therapy but outside of that, I'm being stupid with my own mental health and wellbeing. I give into the impulse to eat out constantly, I drink casually even though being hungover sends me spiraling every time, and I don't make time for self-care routines. This causes me to snap at my boyfriend. I feel like I need much more alone time but always feel so guilty when I send him off to his mom's or friend's house for the night. 

I had a mini breakdown this morning. I got up at 6 like usual, got to work, settled in, and then noticed a message from my bf's mom. She was telling me she found a picture of me on FB from 8 years ago where I ""look better."" She in short said ""hope this doesn't come across the wrong way, but I needed to tell you how much healthier and prettier you look here."" First of all, I was 18 in the picture. Wearing about 5 pounds of makeup and dressed to go out clubbing. It took everything in me not to say that I have been carrying the load of so many people around me and I'm definitely aware I looked better when I was a literal teenager.

This is more to vent and see if anyone else has snapped themselves out of something like this. I know exactly what I need to do – I need to learn to say no, I need to slow down, I need to eat mindfully, stop doing things that make me feel sick, make sure I have alone time without worrying about my boyfriend's feelings, and not be so sensitive to critical comments.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has dug themselves out of a rut like this and what exactly it took. I have the tools to do what I need to do, but something is not connecting in my brain and actions.",4.402450809797884,4.839774771784235,5.236111631642352,85.21562776067464,69.95435684647303,8.625993842859055,29.44880203453353,8.654491914285503,2.0052297416677822,1848,67,396,29,31,603,228,482,0.085,0.8109999999999999,0.10400000000000001,0.8413,2,2,3,0,0,0,53.0,0,2,0,6,18,16,1,0,15,0,26,12,4,6,5,81,73,39,0,12,15,2,6,6,2,0,5,4,0,0,21,31,3,2,10,3,3,11,8,4,0,1,12,14,57,12,72,58,8,61,1,1,4,0,26,27,0,6,28,252,78,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037981025973445,0.0,0.0,0.14109313111622904,0.0,0.0,0.05667711084380675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052107764900749684,0.0,0.0,0.09525514025327336,0.13958367053656698,0.0,0.0606367636855991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052376206729784464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048430967880425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603883245645644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997283636809294,0.0,0.05867501454346271,0.2142517473895246,0.07360808328009556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672673805041161,0.0,0.13939723656141947,0.11380263267444808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04498929466408458,0.0,0.1147795984343574,0.0,0.06121734212281146,0.06662950998964652,0.0,0.0,0.2066458499299325,0.145984042543861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057938557895582166,0.0,0.07468454781268391,0.05262545613807492,0.0,0.07117451999626549,0.06534208503651731,0.11613391990005935,0.0,0.10895552637448024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240302692334337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765353350369188,0.06707952381966799,0.07859552901758532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351871929824276,0.060543714204437486,0.0,0.0,0.037434205641305424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048111617054080805,0.1996651996097959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715982564799364,0.07620322725657618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18186908310624225,0.06905788757125512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861866528124025,0.06864386801226452,0.0,0.06877670136712312,0.15955085707236386,0.0,0.0,0.10014467935253492,0.4545574783632146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06392128423895706,0.0,0.0,0.07754934375076067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04722234307966599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06479293375786556,0.10833551468049234,0.0,0.0,0.05427881147512865,0.0,0.14211753612846684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487646197492262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05694716413010398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419755224224435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786064557715765,0.0,0.15579080682311966,0.0,0.04525255879484917,0.0,0.06692261127405981,0.0,0.1985919311580135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15135647382612932,0.13873677844644042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750190152217978,0.05620198306054743,0.0,0.0540664919580385,0.10927543911495438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566039949648697,0.07386777836788236,0.0991770174586865,0.06917405747128462,0.0,0.0,0.07447302581258926,0.0,0.043863806844995495
mentalhealth,weliveinasocietyboi,2020/02/10,"Requesting feedback on my confusion So I suppose I should start by listing my symptoms (not for diagnosis) 

- Little to no empathy/struggle forming real human connections that mean anything more than me benefiting from them (loving someone for them and not what they do for me)

- Lying/ Manipulating/ generally cunning and deceitful to friends, family and strangers

- Inability to feel regret or guilt 

- Superior feeling around most 

- Constant and obsessive desire to control people and situations 

- Emotional numbness in general (sometimes completely sometimes less) 

- Discontent with my success / constantly wanting to do more and never being satisfied with how far I’ve come 

- Selfishness

- Very forgetful and absent minded / caught up in my own world with my own goals and desires 

- In general the things I respond to the most are things that boost my ego, get me money, success, and give me control over people. 

- I will watch videos of people getting tortured and killed and beheaded to feel something at all / videos of war and people begging for their life and getting killed regardless make me feel (not good but something) 

- I have taken thousand of dollars worth of LSD and have experimented with ecstasy and marijuana as well. Haven’t had any drugs other than alcohol in almost a year 

Childhood:

- I was very distracted / stressed / attention seeking

- I would kill animals every now and then (Baby birds/ cut heads off snakes/ found a goats decaying head and strung it up about 10 feet in the woods with a rope through its eyes/ shot squirrels for no reason/ knocked cats out of tall trees/ had dreams of killing animals/ grew out of it) 

- No objective trauma 

I am not asking to be diagnosed and I am going to see a psychiatrist this month and also begin therapy. I just got out of a 9 month relationship and hurt people in the process of it. I basically have periods of times where I can’t feel any emotion at all and it made it hard for me to take care of my partner and feel for her when I can’t feel for myself. She left because she learned that I have had episodes where I cannot feel sometimes lasting just a day but it was usually for weeks at a time of not longer and I suppose I didn’t think if it as pretending or lying to her as I had learned to function in my day to day life by going through the motions of what I’m expected to do and not just sit around like a stump on a log. I have no resentment for her feeling how she does and I know I hurt her and in the moment of seeing her cry and leave it hurt. A lot. But the second she was gone I was fine and I still feel fine like it was just another day. I used to get enjoyment from hurting people this way. Manipulating them. Getting my use from them and getting rid of them. I never intended that with this person but it happened still. I just don’t understand why I am so cold and enjoy it generally. I’m obsessed with control over people and me being in charge of everything that happens in my life. If anyone could respond with comments or questions or advise regarding what I should consider thinking about that would be useful. Like I said I am going to see a psychiatrist and therapist so I’m not asking for a diagnosis and it’s hard to pin point what I’m looking for. I suppose for someone to understand? Would love to hear constructive feedback. I am finally taking legitimate steps to seek help and I guess that’s a good starting place to understanding myself and maybe feeling in the future.",6.0799079668399605,7.351386261205566,6.5772302234087405,74.09752160320359,66.60432766615146,9.714893915975834,35.10640016861037,9.910423181423305,3.6731672333848535,2769,132,477,62,44,901,306,647,0.149,0.736,0.115,-0.9703,0,0,4,0,0,0,64.0,0,0,7,6,22,41,8,6,21,0,40,14,4,14,4,137,103,56,5,14,22,0,13,3,2,6,8,2,0,3,30,49,1,3,24,4,3,9,19,23,1,2,17,22,68,18,98,75,11,76,0,5,6,2,35,35,0,13,33,347,98,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389883071814012,0.059872457599909966,0.0,0.0,0.047815166847594535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132041465156772,0.06269650390462023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041807542231451535,0.0,0.049203233682577806,0.1064540580938199,0.11179378923202887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036448286950561085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06096132467133038,0.0,0.0,0.05150500313021277,0.06269015301664713,0.12922654009542733,0.2011834424944277,0.04773857348973174,0.0,0.06567805337457337,0.15424204525781618,0.0,0.0,0.060687019850656214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05232386349023939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933904999867171,0.0,0.0,0.1345145711077168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05037683946603127,0.0,0.05373666154480744,0.058487469449867165,0.0563660175409785,0.0,0.3325556528995562,0.0,0.0,0.06549856415984509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655581919970633,0.046194692991727786,0.0,0.1874312552142763,0.057357366172402835,0.10194250405418713,0.10030039138502804,0.04782065049864414,0.0,0.0658669761276534,0.0,0.1057466880928533,0.0,0.10712271349436583,0.0,0.1227264675041321,0.0,0.06738926157907282,0.0,0.04007691999109077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560317527702092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646013335499304,0.0,0.03285979379356248,0.04873797723476594,0.0,0.06331046717516149,0.06496353902198533,0.0,0.12669731773825946,0.08763318433674645,0.05992669792078924,0.0,0.0,0.05020972331469086,0.0,0.0,0.050832516359334334,0.1079281590731323,0.05657607532066355,0.03991122868720097,0.0,0.06006850518419461,0.06513037104473514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603722767989336,0.0,0.09544986179065057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222963872758423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29016283386394354,0.052207550627017936,0.062469294717744026,0.0,0.05652220622688945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06698006012697423,0.0,0.0,0.06805571155763036,0.0,0.061475524990140674,0.0,0.06419359517339905,0.0,0.0,0.056875320474655836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429380312906393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720804701169461,0.0,0.0,0.10132213081711744,0.09206069302808303,0.17740569216415605,0.0,0.08464133171958484,0.0,0.09549899027454148,0.0,0.06849085509365832,0.06250696105790551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062146165947030964,0.0899113943741429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683766851658765,0.06942243234382149,0.0794455084677443,0.07662383910425677,0.0,0.0,0.06972970089919196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18673489109388566,0.0,0.15492173560878233,0.0658517879183835,0.09866834583614677,0.0352665211909586,0.04745963608540176,0.04796106040589103,0.0,0.053759655857827854,0.0,0.053952445165673685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127422300824723,0.0,0.0,0.038503705988535634
mentalhealth,walkingfish6006,2020/02/10,"I think I may have depression, but I don’t want to self diagnose since that can be toxic to actual people suffering, so how do I ask? Recently I have been thinking that I might have depression because I show many symptoms. For context, I already have really bad anxiety (diagnosed) and anxiety and depression runs in my family. I want to ask my mom to take me for a diagnosis, but how do I do that without worrying her? My brother has it and I know it takes a toll on her but I feel like if I have a diagnosis it would help my mental state to just know. I definitely don’t want to self diagnose. I am in 8th grade.",2.86872,4.363802631999999,5.5218000000000025,77.73790000000002,74.68,10.44,29.3,10.577609850970193,3.4618800000000007,479,21,98,17,10,172,70,125,0.2,0.672,0.127,-0.9304,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,3,0,18,4,0,2,0,22,30,10,0,5,6,2,1,1,0,3,4,0,0,2,6,3,0,0,5,1,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,1,22,1,12,25,0,6,0,4,0,0,9,3,0,3,2,72,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.1371880005964563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15513601300496588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150900789235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628508604203246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738030990235104,0.08569763715511551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3632498679241264,0.4280640855007399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325284374998944,0.0,0.07108261160837001,0.10043199029337917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942293214589121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452066042677398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868138818361523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252834022226268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14167384665696794,0.14913555538460369,0.0,0.1646482367137238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974620339147556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006059167842867,0.0,0.13880801578103516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29331590138733354,0.0,0.0,0.11629109318333608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14611878981128,0.2114007185478213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18015886370449746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487571671759545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355162760938604,0.0,0.0,0.14276810288540387,0.0,0.09986559968610532,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Willis_Aa,2020/02/10,"Change your perspective, change your life CHANGE IS SIMPLY DOING SOMETHING DIFFERENT.
At some point in life, everyone will need to make a change or adapt to new situations. No matter how small, it can be the most important decision in
someone’s life. The change you make can be the difference between six figures or a 9-5 for the rest of your life. A person who really wants to achieve big dreams can’t have small thoughts. 
A person who wants to be better simply has to make decisions that will make them better.


Doesn’t everyone have something they all want? The important thing is understanding why you
need to change for it to be possible. You can’t fix a problem that you aren’t aware of. Just like
someone with an illness, they first have to see the symptoms before they decide to get help.
Instead of thinking about changing your perspective as a difficult task, just think about it as a real-life issue with a simple solution.
Now that we’ve established what change is and why it is important, let’s look at ways we can facilitate change.


Keep in mind that what works for someone else might not work for you so be open-minded.
When you find your magic potion, keep doing.

Click the link below to keep reading!




[Amanda Willis] (https://www.williswonders.com/change-your-perspective/)",5.4634913793103435,7.9811769870689675,4.904689655172414,80.55927586206899,70.07758620689657,8.088275862068969,26.686206896551727,8.841846274778883,2.166330344827586,1039,35,179,20,20,314,129,232,0.043,0.85,0.107,0.8973,2,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,1,11,4,6,9,5,0,0,16,0,26,6,0,5,1,39,45,8,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,0,2,13,4,0,3,10,2,0,0,6,2,0,2,1,3,16,3,30,35,4,15,0,0,3,0,21,10,0,5,5,119,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474807651093085,0.0,0.0,0.13459311069988314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7244503821761412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899838876772193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356450220914002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541696135534454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954605314868686,0.0647232055146475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039754554241985526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05100238232357025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941952917008073,0.0,0.20290028261331736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780849108693796,0.21498209077590666,0.03717435681824049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389751271868746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20316608611246395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072082549252138,0.15366100706981084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284144276249887,0.0,0.07348943421580402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287994475864154,0.0,0.0,0.07193085627329514,0.08578148741938604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280908042819025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611187328359069,0.08660853730617267,0.0487460236150914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06063490010446796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552978895765784,0.0,0.0,0.19341568869023168,0.1171575725837942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790879767277308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05055166661588622,0.09751244202308454,0.0,0.0604079783515732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921370796323514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464182856891804,0.06039771781622112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732109334963175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107907189349945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luciferhynix,2020/02/10,The army is driving me insane I haven’t been in the army long I hit my two years in threee months and recently my mental health has gone down hill. They won’t do anything for me unless I am gonna kill myself and at this point I’m whatever’s about living. I just cant keep going on like this. My company is toxic and they made it clear that they don’t care about me. My CoC is impossible to communicate with and they make it impossible to get any basic information. My squad leader is a piece of shit that doesn’t do anything for me. I’m in a sustainment brigade so it’s absolute ass... my unit is filled with everyone of one MOS and I personally hate not having a day to day job and it’s just difficult. Obviously there is more to the story.. but how the fuck do I keep pushing? At this point I want to get med board but let’s be real I doubt it would happen... and I want an honorable discharge. I want to be be able to finish school. But I really want out.. I’m not about to fail a PT but I just am going through the motions but it’s hell doing it.,-0.0398875661375655,2.157326625,2.500912698412701,91.90890211640213,88.55357142857143,5.997089947089948,18.117724867724867,7.3871296695380915,0.3518728835978835,820,22,187,15,27,282,124,224,0.115,0.7959999999999999,0.09,-0.8599,1,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,4,2,10,11,5,1,10,0,25,4,2,3,2,36,47,15,1,5,11,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,12,10,0,2,1,0,0,7,7,8,0,2,3,0,27,3,27,36,2,24,1,1,0,2,6,10,4,1,8,125,39,3,0.1518800711487043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032836565706796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24996871506927515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15485185481222824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19590016233224392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512791666004649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404106784141158,0.15870213711286915,0.0,0.17263388902284355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343070453251615,0.0,0.0,0.1499501264310946,0.0,0.1614414133987571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071753513565556,0.2699959714094076,0.16803279582138722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553076629391978,0.0,0.07420093100453375,0.0,0.13411288539620062,0.134409083579489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437125956273924,0.10138112685984074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16870452013509246,0.0,0.15305938914391976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122922377049553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291786689749813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261581983960866,0.0,0.0,0.2871515184258905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728727717463997,0.0972982626893494,0.0,0.14996324731103694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15371074049250005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155902710458876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483647604747988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583312041618412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078912448919147,0.0,0.0,0.0978057862360314
mentalhealth,loushkof,2020/02/10,"Feeling tired an lonely Today is not my day
I loose my friends, they don't talk to me, I have no job ( anxiety ), no money ( hopefully I have a boyfriend with a good work, but it's my money ), all day i have to clean the appartment, buying food and... Voila.

I'm tired of that

I'd like to make sport with my boyfriend, but i'm so low... He complain about it. So he doing sport with girls at his work.
I have no money to make gift for Valentin's day and his birthday.

I don't want to be in depression again. But I see it come, and nobody to talk with about that.

Sorry if my english is bad. But you know, in France we have no works and english skills...",1.6432581287325831,2.853698992700732,2.962163238221631,96.00823490378237,77.32116788321169,6.149701393497015,21.94359654943597,6.574015621080383,0.16272846715328448,490,13,119,4,11,159,78,137,0.21899999999999997,0.657,0.124,-0.9287,1,2,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,1,1,4,5,9,0,0,4,0,11,3,0,2,1,23,21,11,0,3,6,0,1,1,1,0,2,0,1,1,5,10,1,0,2,2,5,1,7,5,0,0,0,2,18,4,17,20,1,10,0,3,1,0,12,4,0,2,6,73,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406219999039236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348224344351674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15834488209596612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.355646592363706,0.0,0.15832412524706127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294504937457383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222761945933658,0.0,0.1420190810733822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15417971733628658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825750000979102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182413249491662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010228105565774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980529656128614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24540290910390525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464809522453882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057717375447768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954955327046009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42254870808114986,0.1742401180734981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842195516034256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40147002753171795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heijeul,2020/02/10,"I hate myself I find myself the ugliest person in the world. I’m overweight. I’m short. I have thunder thighs. I have large front teeth. I just look really bad and during my down days, I avoid mirrors as much as I can because I cannot seem to see my reflection.

I hope for affection and love but I know I can’t get them because I’m just a helpless and miserable person. I don’t have any lovable and acceptable qualities.

I just... really hate myself.",0.977022977022976,3.4313643846153847,3.0671328671328664,87.80741258741259,86.47252747252745,6.386013986013987,22.558441558441558,7.686295010490155,1.334134065934066,353,13,70,7,11,119,56,91,0.24600000000000002,0.598,0.157,-0.8247,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,3,9,2,2,3,0,7,4,2,1,0,16,19,7,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,4,1,1,5,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,0,3,19,3,6,19,1,6,0,2,2,1,4,4,0,2,1,44,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622216336323369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19917861463986772,0.290834751768262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538444968814077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180296436650178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463210927168747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4710358885557333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23693317722944424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13110039964388365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003212446772678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21529996317396685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536110704642793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4165839137414931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056414470038289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19009282432141475,0.2171662289604518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Comicalacimoc,2020/02/10,"Feeling quite low these days and not sure what to do about it I am 37.  Every job I have, I start to want out after 1-2 years.  My current job involves dealing with very inconsistent bosses.  Sometimes they are nice but occasionally they are very mean or two-faced.

I’m pretty far into my career in accounting and a lot of it is stressful and doing things right is extremely important.  I’m currently making more than I should be at my level so I’m afraid to leave a company yet again and my SO and I are trying to have a baby so the last thing I want to do is get pregnant at a brand new job.

I hate my commute (1 hour+ on two subways), I hate the winter, I hate being two hours away from my family.  But there are no jobs by them and my SO is tied to this city.

I’m bored, I never have fun anymore. 

Things are just ... meh.",0.6816731266149887,2.7420718313953536,2.8866666666666667,91.38611111111112,83.59302325581395,5.682687338501292,19.439276485788113,6.937597516519254,0.24297958656330776,633,17,140,8,18,215,109,172,0.188,0.742,0.069,-0.9746,6,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,3,1,9,10,3,2,6,0,19,0,0,2,2,24,33,13,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,7,0,2,0,1,20,3,20,30,2,25,0,1,0,0,5,11,0,2,14,97,28,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428276267103815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774131522479628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082038039359131,0.12919837471265375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558665302618477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181395895345954,0.0,0.06336504615069194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547399929656328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3711796697036262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468279207566521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4974390373802451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021517019731912,0.0,0.13269471450381293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065417228268157,0.0,0.0,0.08365139814072163,0.0,0.0,0.13650911732174387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665372983180312,0.12103386029338788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12749446459753602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13329217040616848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702173170237587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394368431970622,0.0,0.0887014252846902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355247825971884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811166385302875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24976910300403324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508336723953379,0.0,0.36725532748383055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20680258044956654,0.14783277299248532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070132004162481
mentalhealth,justalightingguy93,2020/02/10,"So tonight, I was on the other side of the question. Hey folks,

This is my first ever.post to reddit. I follow a few things and browse here and there. Until now I never thought I'd post. 

I'm working as a touring lighting guy in Australia. The company I tour with is very close knit to say the least. To the point there's a few relationships in the touring party and they're beautifu, honest and friendlyl relationships. Personally, I stick by the rule of don't shit where you eat. 

Tonight a friend in the touring party had a bad time on a number of levels. None of which were to do with her. However mainly the complexity of touring for the majority of your current life. She had such a bad night I asked her to come outside for a chat. I wanted to know if she was okay. 
As soon as we left the room she broke down. She broke down to the point we walked 20m down the street and sat on the kerb and had a chat...

For me, this had been the only time I had, had to have had the chat of ""are you okay?"". As far as I had remembered, O was only ever asked that. 
So I called my other friend with my first friends permission, she also came down and helped me out immensely. I guess what I'm asking is... How do you follow up with someone if the original questions was ""are you okay?"". 

I'm scared and confused for my friend.",2.251907852044127,3.950767552238808,3.5722582738481528,90.205058403634,76.83582089552239,6.601168072680077,23.21933809214796,7.423996415210882,0.8033927319922123,1016,31,222,13,23,332,137,268,0.066,0.8220000000000001,0.11199999999999999,0.8856,2,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,2,5,0,3,12,15,1,2,26,3,23,3,1,2,2,33,38,20,0,3,2,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,1,2,8,18,1,0,6,3,0,5,3,7,0,2,17,2,31,8,42,21,6,42,0,2,0,0,34,22,1,6,14,160,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852484533120777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34553259517579393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057375706677208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580333659215442,0.14091062479708194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061278837186128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606672386529946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228870914577165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095916492909175,0.0,0.0,0.3807432061579493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357212379096378,0.12198965987953338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825799135253263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06770876930002795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13385967374556965,0.0,0.0870214373180552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502121909928612,0.0,0.0,0.11561702495755505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18740182175104728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075755077263086,0.0,0.0,0.2329320169072281,0.0,0.23598751950612934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27602957385129856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645463543344923,0.13956420396732194,0.0,0.0,0.09797542441247124,0.1233470083016395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646540400538353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438892014330703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185014243485211,0.0,0.0,0.09780887482597687,0.14368051915372296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165481115623808,0.07266791637021668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969275132107324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HappyDragon24,2020/02/10,"I need someone Hello! The last few days were awful for me. They were really hard and now I need someone to talk with and help me a bit. I'm completely alone and I don't have friends, at least ones that want to help me or talk to me. I just need someone to talk with and hear me out, to feel like someone cares at least 1% about me. I feel like if I disappear nobody will observe that I'm gone.",0.08198692810457331,2.026364623529414,1.8368627450980384,98.71477124183008,85.11764705882355,5.189542483660131,18.8562091503268,6.42735559955562,-0.2390653594771237,303,8,74,3,9,99,50,85,0.127,0.708,0.166,0.5502,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,16,16,6,0,5,3,0,3,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,4,13,4,12,12,4,8,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,2,5,46,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16927345898838195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843300033892784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16663689959728414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713626268834396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540460016198644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16527928528010524,0.2335216334819301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262725254001919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14640919426693716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18420757219811926,0.0,0.2190993627100276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322455610719214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15969602824351958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635637259014542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075046065002488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470317485325308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5539251593033477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3940981050969316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640052578462144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThroawaBeginningPast,2020/02/10,"Almost no emotions... literally... I think my brain functionality is off and it concerns me to a degree.

It's not that I suppress them, it's not that I fail to recognize there; they are literally not there; to check this out I tried different drugs to alter my emotional state, alcohol being the most accessible, but also THC, Coke, Caffeine to ridiculous amounts, which is supposed to get you uninhibited or change you; I was with a friend, all the physical effects appeared, but mentally I was unmovable.

This applies as well for all non prescription painkillers, and almost all mental medication, of which they have tried but is like taking a placebo.

On one hand this allows me to be able to be in front of a multitude and talk like it's nothing, makes me immune to depression and anxiety; so most doctors (as seen during my childhood) have been as, ""nothing to fix just go on as you are"".

But also no shame, no regret, no empathy, no guilt, no sense of morality; I just don't do wrong, because I do what makes sense and what doesn't waste my time and increases value, not because I intrinsically care. Which funnily most people think that I have high standard morals, when in reality I just do what makes sense, I also do help a lot of people, because it makes sense to increase my worth and in turn my influence; I don't know what to say, but ironically, I seem to be able to keep friendships for longer.

So there are only some partial fear, anger, happiness, fulfillment, love, and not much else; everything else is just logic, in fact, that's my job, I am a data analyst and automation engineer, because honestly, what else can I do?

I am worried to lose the logic layer as I age, in fact probably is one of the few fears I have left; a few people in my family lost their mind to the point they died, all of them immune to most drugs, there was always one or two in each generation for generations, that would suddenly snap, not in the current, and time is due, maybe it's me, maybe I am a ticking clock.",12.620377585860615,7.3130635744125305,11.982506527415145,61.62814420566382,58.164490861618795,15.648845149628439,45.91062462341836,12.766815935922706,5.526530588471578,1571,63,296,37,13,522,189,383,0.159,0.701,0.14,-0.7398,3,0,3,0,0,0,67.0,0,3,6,4,15,20,2,4,14,0,34,11,2,7,6,64,52,28,1,2,17,0,1,2,1,1,7,1,0,0,22,13,2,2,7,0,2,5,15,12,1,4,6,3,41,8,44,41,17,30,2,5,1,1,14,15,0,12,11,217,63,3,0.18997152394262565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151089253252486,0.19022903989876053,0.0,0.0,0.22788023859314485,0.07903576311087551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266384792059086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23160975548697654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603552403752683,0.0,0.0,0.09684431479894053,0.0,0.10048234150307317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181109760189129,0.0,0.09858022460841633,0.09923990457113817,0.0,0.09722195226899744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22030665580628025,0.0,0.2380452474608057,0.2136923949673731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536707814252757,0.0,0.08954412287022237,0.2137707796629405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338576407666615,0.0,0.04962614023726128,0.0,0.0539825974760407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111410987152944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366695403544036,0.10035767260290386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942587122130176,0.08442770957223822,0.0,0.0,0.052201690687155286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320230830642,0.0,0.0,0.0928104907660438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626477122895002,0.10368817971714003,0.08075349810501807,0.08572835867085543,0.0,0.2536149347695233,0.0,0.19085192970866527,0.0,0.0,0.09568816217711604,0.19144661435488053,0.0,0.09590854219403737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982546425076315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18228280078328304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930944316878089,0.0722409522015455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19755350258434032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979224717440941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241071676268794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553649036891409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647147028295378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141747187849587,0.07634595747582594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217260818284983,0.0,0.0,0.11077392332147204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12897819469870495,0.10331723317661183,0.092787287474946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540360734363568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646265200047607,0.0,0.06747516002977234,0.1038520196009092,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,L4dyHD,2020/02/10,"How can I help him? ""Existential dread""? 'm not sure this is the right place for this. If not, please tell me where to go. Ty!

I (34f) dont know how to help my dh (36m), or if I even can. I'm not entirely sure what is wrong. He has mild anxiety and add.  Add is kinda medicated. During the day, things are mostly fine. Anxiety bumps sometimes, but generally things are good. 

At night, he says he brain doesnt shut up. (Which, I get. Mine does that too sometimes.)  Sometimes its conversations or arguments from the past. Sometimes worry from the future. He says that its annoying and makes it hard to sleep.  But something changed. 

Now, hes been having what he calls ""existential dread"". And last night was so bad that while we were cuddling, he was trying not to cry.   It's been like that for a little while now.  Wait don't know why. Or what's going on. I dont know how to help.  Can I help? I'm sure this is a ""just be there for him"" type thing.  But how do I do that? And most importantly, how does he help himself? Is this a dr thing?",-0.39085714285714346,1.867886866666666,1.4123809523809534,97.40428571428578,94.61904761904762,4.8952380952380965,16.047619047619047,6.588339656340683,-0.3671238095238096,782,19,183,11,30,254,115,210,0.132,0.726,0.142,0.6369,0,0,1,0,0,0,50.0,1,0,0,0,13,11,1,2,7,0,25,5,2,6,3,37,35,20,0,2,13,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,21,7,0,1,3,0,0,2,8,5,0,0,5,3,15,6,13,29,2,20,0,0,0,1,22,8,0,8,11,113,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669282448125192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109713105139526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179594407595555,0.11140719707191864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541737316258385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984542133511568,0.07036293690103998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19095497334872247,0.0,0.25573772508302256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206204303651516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700224199301252,0.0,0.1240124285317772,0.09151110643505557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773559106627944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36564994814580204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988181575882894,0.08893417384661854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053302614598304335,0.10935068858663233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728276459526055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991061868219174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20477308524929144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415193996794156,0.0,0.0,0.11399026861009158,0.1197632292848232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317406473641672,0.0,0.1735274709145634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10918261182121447,0.0,0.0,0.08399344969490752,0.4316258644960024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3084871728082031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536154618197527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899349157380889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740743308958497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844922604608013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108002235581951,0.0,0.0,0.11928789795965808,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Queen0918,2020/02/10,I need advice asap My dad has complex ptsd and clinical depression with psychotic tendencies or something like that. I'm worried that the clinical depression with psychotic tendencies is genetic I really don't want to be psychotic. I'm 15  by the way female,4.876956521739132,8.081631043478264,6.980608695652176,61.401347826086976,75.52173913043478,13.24521739130435,37.46086956521739,11.602472056035307,6.894326956521741,212,13,29,11,5,74,34,46,0.22399999999999998,0.726,0.05,-0.8225,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,7,8,2,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,4,7,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3241217806421684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5713649633475102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204605551453674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24594252951889803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3877256488206362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124878955529942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553497106040915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956382400331764,0.2632785815784812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3368453745288799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,person495624,2020/02/10,"Is this an anxiety attack? I don't know if this is an anxiety attack or not. It's been happening since I was about 14, but very rarely.  

It never happens on complete random. Usually it'll be a small thing that sets me off, like someone making a comment with a slightly crappy tone or hearing my boyfriend talk about a past girl he's been with. It's almost always when people say or do something I might not like.  Nothing else. About 99% of the time I'll have a normal reaction and think nothing of it, but when that 1% happens, I start to shake and my heart starts to race. It feels like I'm out of breath and just so upset and helpless. Sometimes I'll get the feeling of nausea. 

I'm not diagnosed with anxiety. I was diagnosed with depression about 2 years ago and given medicine for it,  but I stopped taking it a few months ago just because I was lazy, and I still feel fine.  My mental health is decent. 

My boyfriend who is diagnosed with anxiety and depression says this is an anxiety attack,  but I want to disagree. 

Feel free to skip over this as its not a super serious post compared to others",4.092866972477065,5.38522575229358,4.933841743119267,83.95700114678901,71.29357798165137,8.018807339449541,29.22133027522936,8.472884824447931,2.1336045871559635,866,34,169,14,16,281,124,218,0.23,0.684,0.086,-0.9882,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,10,15,3,2,12,0,16,6,2,1,1,41,35,19,0,3,14,0,4,3,0,2,4,3,0,1,18,13,0,1,6,0,1,1,6,9,0,0,6,7,14,7,24,26,1,22,0,3,0,0,8,5,0,7,17,110,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18859963007366293,0.0,0.10652461422082354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851702326327378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4069036132265086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3630692226130504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484851068522425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153783614776447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18325058289021826,0.32392163126166723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886718230598263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151565271315707,0.07599818631977028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05557937365247871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28221553630290336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307740149576345,0.11989845381505927,0.12606129831703505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058463891370985226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591628485997325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100974988188129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720643256618416,0.11285280409073713,0.0,0.0,0.08491182851240826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204713050894215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423021531968814,0.20414974541073716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015521387530397,0.07375078190644657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188302673305943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16919594401413898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799897464204261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013577636523712,0.08189683706697347,0.10521294585149016,0.0,0.15059320378689595,0.0,0.08495553302199015,0.0889387863466351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998482928297486,0.08550454411965676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706744175899367,0.06816427141878073,0.0,0.0,0.06203127269015767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716299255048185,0.08777497949255839,0.06274592217144953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850549636544301
mentalhealth,captaincornhole69,2020/02/10,"They say misery loves company... Why am i like this, everyday is a rerun for me...im going nowhere in life. am I good enough.....I dont know. No one truly loves me...And here I am wallowing in my own self pity like a cunt....put me out of my misery!!!!",-2.1212735849056585,-0.2975032452830177,1.242806603773584,97.95213443396229,100.32075471698113,4.914150943396227,14.172169811320755,6.6274283507984215,-0.4695641509433957,180,4,45,3,8,64,40,53,0.096,0.556,0.348,0.9366,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,0,1,6,0,0,2,0,5,3,0,0,0,2,9,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,1,7,5,5,9,1,5,0,1,0,2,5,3,0,0,3,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171821369674357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27963824083103495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15380807457898887,0.2269957495391225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923321790352108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487338866552846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19115746347848966,0.2644371251641226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4885172037093437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833892410914315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720628670348552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21521976872738527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823312682630573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24420594098855394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SooJotThatDown,2020/02/10,"Paranoia is growing. Are these thoughts people just learn to deal with, or am I descending into madness? It feels like I have waves/periods of time I convince myself I'm losing control or am ""going crazy"".

It just feels like I always have someone that is watching me even though I realize that isnt true.  Realizing it isnt true though doesnt help me ignore it. 

I really like to just sit with my eyes closed and think about things but whenever I do this, especially with like headphones or whatever, it makes me feel so vulnerable.

There is also the huge factor of social anxiety that likely adds to my paranoia.  It just always feels like someone is staring at me or is weirded out by my presence.",4.8745112781954925,6.510808819548871,5.6556466165413575,78.20316917293236,69.82706766917292,8.327518796992482,30.59323308270677,8.841846274778883,2.6371058646616543,555,23,98,10,10,181,82,133,0.128,0.735,0.136,0.2748,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,11,13,1,0,1,0,14,1,1,2,2,31,23,10,0,0,9,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,12,8,0,2,9,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,1,7,15,9,13,22,0,9,0,1,3,0,3,5,0,4,7,71,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150133926911384,0.2736518645952271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579493566879688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18443166238523695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952878308251618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861002076816467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3325800092388371,0.35242450478262016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345413945259558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021960185577992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4820178141981754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839645221543132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097639173982478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400089067629485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053434578961785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16762425358470562,0.2786562670066599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924557469101116,0.10536549516043116,0.3231198112620308,0.13054573177743456,0.09588536085532633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spaceyspaceboy,2020/02/10,"Intense fear, paranoid thoughts and trauma flashbacks but I can't remember or communicate them Hiya. I'm a 23 year old transgender man diagnosed with cPTSD, panic disorder, and major depressive disorder. I've been on medication for my depression for a while. I really helped with my panic for a while. But lately things have been really bad. My eating disorder has relapsed and my anxiety is through the roof. 

Tonight I have been so anxious and my thoughts have been all over the place, and I spent the whole day in bed without realising. Then my partner sent me an innocuous message and it made me start crying and having all these scary thoughts. I think they were about not deserving to be loved, being a bad person, etc. Then I started remembering childhood trauma and I came to some sort of conclusion that I have been put in this world to suffer and that it's some kind of punishment because I am so inherently bad. It eventually just descended into suicidal ideation. 

Then I needed to go to the toilet so I got up and it was like I had been thrust into an entirely different brain, all these thoughts just disappeared, I stopped crying and I can't even imagine the feelings I was having before. I objectively recognise some of them but for the most part they're pretty much gone. Even reading through the post I've written so far you can see that the emotional charge is just about gone. Reading back I can also see things that I now don't remember. 

Before the medication this happened a LOT, for pretty much my whole life. I have never been able to communicate it to a therapist brcause I rarely remember that this even happens. It was just kind of normal for me to spend nights crying and fantasizing about how I deserve to suffer. It feels like it has become more than dangerous and I'm really scared of what will happen to me if I don't explain what's going on to a professional. But I have no idea how. 

I have tried to explain to professionals that I have intense feelings and memories and then forget them, but that's pretty standard for PTSD and they don't really know what to do with it. I don't know how to communicate the severity because I don't even remember what I was thinking. 

I feel like I've written an entire novel but I just really needed to talk about this before I wake up tomorrow feeling wonky and having no idea why. I genuinely don't believe that any professional can help me at this point, they have never been able to in the past and the fact that I can't even communicate my most intense and life-threatening symptom makes it even harder.",5.862752628324054,7.009954728571429,6.456011131725424,75.2229715522573,67.0204081632653,9.93939393939394,32.39950525664811,10.090330364082071,3.3565238095238086,2067,86,369,49,33,675,215,490,0.214,0.706,0.079,-0.9977,2,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,6,1,25,21,2,4,22,0,47,9,2,5,6,88,86,41,1,4,15,0,5,3,1,1,5,0,1,3,32,25,1,1,24,3,2,8,15,15,0,0,27,7,53,6,51,56,17,46,0,4,2,1,18,15,0,9,25,280,85,5,0.1319771930154027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05277105678618551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04487450847063102,0.0,0.0504810957096602,0.07454833114647291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050741157481447814,0.16529316521523932,0.08045207189417163,0.07287922038203276,0.16845430601479774,0.07434655106154799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366509744174364,0.0,0.07547337484211547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21745612403379672,0.04255718564708455,0.0,0.113671762956091,0.06697703640627277,0.0,0.06894403839372718,0.2268859457451527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752280829855667,0.0,0.07422828924889363,0.0,0.0,0.07359472840380099,0.2615090738403654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425551699303562,0.16682908564885374,0.09428453306049377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07500568020625993,0.0,0.05277710880022232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17506049388322098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846153051839281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14898618659524376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743393732790538,0.07253121377949003,0.0,0.07443801112163721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321939445607004,0.09671608512271368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056101144976305466,0.0595572847150198,0.062440005553100815,0.0440479005787402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13295313725811295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701842235677653,0.09785941634398054,0.1017889473893485,0.0,0.0,0.061925827632356586,0.0646548138718873,0.0,0.0,0.06924393155809573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548467999287978,0.0,0.07145921947605458,0.06299358213193319,0.0,0.057618697171703336,0.06894403839372718,0.0,0.06238055309912039,0.0,0.06319883452151144,0.20140237793102114,0.0,0.0,0.07713713803261332,0.06633676566289383,0.0,0.0,0.13201290791816264,0.0,0.21136992328708773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3737610806756311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660660969079455,0.0,0.1051687356884943,0.0,0.0,0.07454833114647291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341413649918658,0.0,0.0,0.05516942145419383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218081419681671,0.0,0.0,0.0685874183538369,0.0,0.053039134269280766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661784661607278,0.0876797826957625,0.08456565627878168,0.0,0.2095502985174294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044801925423491734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05954444447859453,0.14734782282441802,0.0,0.06361065222486632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04249449262983853
mentalhealth,MagicPolaroid_,2020/02/10,"I hit myself when i'm angry Im not sure what to do about this. When I get angry or frustrated I hit myself in the forehead but today I hit myself in the throat. I don't like hurting myself like this but im not sure how to stop. I know I have some kind of anxiety disorder but im not sure if it plays into this or not. I've never had any sort of anger issues before and when I hit myself it just happens. I recently cut off a bunch of people who I thought were friends and i've been feeling really isolated the past several weeks. I barely have anyone to talk to or hang out with any more and i've been pretty stressed out about this. I don't know how serious this is or what to do, should I get help? Or do you have any advice for me?",0.06821337230544344,2.0014994968944144,2.615330654000733,93.18011691633177,85.08695652173913,5.775812933869201,18.166240409207166,7.048011613610866,0.11680533430763608,573,14,132,8,17,198,84,161,0.235,0.65,0.115,-0.9615,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,1,0,0,8,14,3,1,4,0,14,2,2,2,4,35,26,17,0,2,14,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,4,1,0,1,7,6,0,0,5,1,20,8,18,16,3,16,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,8,11,92,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442430437499212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011401283554105,0.0,0.11292144961303957,0.0,0.0,0.10321253023403308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560546452315755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16917415341459086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746361857810527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404332550009945,0.0,0.15424054339691975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13053127090692346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894004994045223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801984291119028,0.0,0.4783332526223006,0.15406676755771068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15371337736360688,0.1622454839189626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422983996185362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384613717478305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14091070153405447,0.10233437271464034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15017270757015985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456291630218096,0.0,0.14574733003356236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16675758520989709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12340879209022675,0.169087061204735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41736278698256607,0.0,0.0,0.11864354059101195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718606313306085,0.0,0.0,0.13991727273861368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11840405182860345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uthinkubettahthanme,2020/02/10,"Will I ever enjoy working? Bipolar II, ptsd and general anxiety. In high school, my cognitive ability was so dysfunctional that I literally could not plan out my day, listen through a whole song, or drive a car, much less hold down a part time job. It was hard on my nerves and so over stimulating I would cry every time I had to go in, every minute was like pulling teeth, and I would come home with crazy head aches. So I didn't work for a really long time.

Now at 25 I'm doing super well and have hit a lot of milestones (still can'tdrive though). But now that I'm well enough to enter the work force, it still really hard and over stimulating. I've been working for like 8 months now. I'm working part time in a bakery, on paper it's a really fun job, so why am I SO stressed? I just want to feel at least NEUTRAL about going to work, but I still feel that heaviness. I watch the clock tick by counting how much time I have left before I can go home. And then I have to do it all again. This cycle is making me so depressed.

Any advice on how to make work more tolerable/enjoyable? How can I quiet my mind on the job? I just want to be a good worker.",3.2621848739495785,4.1723179915966435,4.595210084033614,87.05273109243699,72.86554621848741,7.952941176470588,23.663865546218492,8.313332769828598,1.137018487394958,894,23,198,14,17,297,139,238,0.079,0.7979999999999999,0.12300000000000001,0.8503,3,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,10,23,10,0,1,11,0,20,3,2,7,2,35,35,20,0,5,6,0,4,2,0,3,1,3,2,0,8,9,0,1,2,1,0,8,2,2,2,0,6,8,20,8,27,23,11,41,0,1,1,0,1,15,0,2,20,130,28,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522575080431203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626846391674847,0.0,0.07454799581154055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292167409527916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394343428008383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780486482505519,0.0,0.10704283122076501,0.06284635570544292,0.0,0.08393243044365513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069056628878467,0.0,0.0,0.08814793651811273,0.16420948086398693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854599075838964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16614704143955436,0.08173535385688467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745898051376626,0.0,0.10001048959568716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295991157849488,0.19549800162563247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901084219047825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587830768026517,0.0,0.0,0.09521703398442592,0.0,0.0,0.08623904111271713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284740776567429,0.0,0.0,0.13009554018942204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839541679083046,0.0,0.07778262997101447,0.0,0.1432720277129645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21105491151918312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139123262308482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872844152969856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09862329625184474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334679951477237,0.0,0.11162716714735403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574286201794448,0.0,0.2841156299904997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11495554699399115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523618538620422,0.0,0.08793230287870575,0.10879800373124937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4966067463587766,0.0,0.0,0.13844953415568018,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bibbityblop,2020/02/10,"Everything crumbling down. This post is probably my way of venting. I feel like my life is crumbling down. My country is on its way to the worst economic crisis we've ever seen. People will soon be going hungry. Our currency is dropping miserably. Our government doesn't give two shits about us and we're well aware we can't remove the people in power. I just lost my job, company going bankrupt. I hadn't been paid in months. I managed to snag a new job at a 60% pay cut, meaning I have to choose between paying either rent, loans or medication (chronic physical illness). And I feel completely alone. Loneliness and depression (I'm almost certain that's what is) have been long time friends. Anxiety just joined the party. I had just had a traumatizing realization about beliefs I had held since I was 15 years old. I have pushed these issues to the back of my head as I can't handle another thought. I feel like a failure in every aspect of life. 30 years old. Haven't had a relationship in over 7 years. Keep having to start over in life for one reason or the other. Don't have many friends, and I can understand why. Sleep isn't easy to come by but when it does waking up is even harder. Barely taking care of myself. Mental health help around here was already too expensive for me when I was getting pain in full. I guess I don't really have many questions or option for that matter, but it's kinda hard to get heard around my life. Thank you kind strangers for making it through the rant :)",2.9783645320197034,5.3485054620689665,3.9520443349753727,85.17560344827591,77.13793103448276,6.901477832512318,24.495073891625616,7.957251820313856,1.5103694581280789,1184,41,223,20,28,381,179,290,0.122,0.7609999999999999,0.11699999999999999,0.3947,4,1,0,0,0,0,36.0,4,1,0,2,17,16,2,1,11,0,32,13,4,2,2,37,57,12,0,0,9,0,4,2,2,1,9,1,1,0,10,8,0,2,10,0,7,5,8,7,1,2,16,6,29,9,36,39,3,40,1,3,1,0,12,16,1,8,17,144,39,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063842199656104,0.11003281306963206,0.11723870917595247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140211926884223,0.08127346681501249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891526151834769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169216061478256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831897057854452,0.0,0.0,0.09151653033768647,0.11139083471012877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915045337719158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297152023044014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017065410264202,0.09610034871397054,0.08951195567650415,0.0,0.0954818467650299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16115472097805136,0.15179604882060055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16416183926557915,0.0,0.11101224548795996,0.10191528632928776,0.12075751477823732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703556456056392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517035689307343,0.0,0.10903310167930673,0.1129283709859554,0.0,0.0,0.07121057064947975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088717301546153,0.2108540226893122,0.09443117655543803,0.0,0.11063282588910364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001623976395249,0.10380719652504948,0.0,0.0,0.09401923914563347,0.0,0.0,0.11597373486963428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091616248876599,0.2154217876943142,0.0,0.11572672974218025,0.0,0.1070258305311632,0.10706513970758733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479991885650402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260745300119684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22296244938879,0.0,0.07199111311901663,0.0,0.11304706969945195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14730716393314933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10174874986417168,0.0,0.11454491096328775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901334495860999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06806019641399141,0.1092326260724988,0.0,0.11406222198102155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905404476935457,0.08788299627784239,0.0,0.10631693142875917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519736463809408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987941317217576,0.0,0.0,0.09781170788372016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434285643572703,0.061949518492848826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378124397831542,0.11059980123156617,0.12779388683356835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16865706093229735,0.0,0.0,0.09552270415008446,0.0,0.0958652613283774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20524562836961585
mentalhealth,Anonabus413,2020/02/10,"Good podcasts re: managing ADHD, anxiety and emotional well-being in general? I'd like to start listening to a good podcast while I walk/run my dog in the morning and I'm hoping to find one that provides a good emotional start to my day or is informative/educational about topics that can help me better manage my mental health. 

Our walks are usually between 20 and 40 minutes depending how many times I press snooze haha 

Thanks!",5.666291666666666,7.4840037125000025,6.8675,69.57416666666668,68.125,10.333333333333336,33.333333333333336,10.504223727775694,4.078083333333334,347,16,56,10,6,117,63,80,0.019,0.6579999999999999,0.32299999999999995,0.9758,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,1,2,8,0,0,3,1,3,1,0,2,0,9,9,6,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,7,8,8,9,0,9,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,7,30,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358030527585641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009805192266654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17352941739567504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653748043975754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4414136205715944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17932992294041333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4937081374317367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085591910379919,0.0,0.0,0.13151362123036664,0.0,0.0,0.1948781262050046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585697881836402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19892341216483056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977308158333484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329551483204692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777530818904713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806413259322592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441005789119647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160946274206192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764139314980529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,multifly8,2020/02/10,"I dont even know anymore My sexual desire and ability to become aroused is gone.
I've been sick for 15 straight weeks with doctors telling me to just wait it out and come back if it doesnt get better (I've gone 4 times now).
I'm always fucking tired, even when I sleep for 9 hours.
I stopped hanging out with friends or talking to them because I dont have the energy to.
I'm lethargic and physically slow.
I mentally check out constantly. I'll check out of conversations for 5 to 10 minutes and nor recall anything.
I'm gaining weight and eating more.
Something always hurts, whether it's my back, jaw, etc.
I lost my health insurance so now I pay for it while going to therapy would now cost me $114 a session. Therefore I had to stop.
I keep crying, randomly. Even in the middle of the night. 
I'm irritable and reactive.
I graduated and work at a job that pays my minimum wage, no benefits, and where I have to pay for parking and everything that certifies me. 
I have no interest or enjoyment in anything. I dont even care to watch tv anymore. I'll just lay in bed for hours and stare at the ceiling.
I moved in with my boyfriend and it hasnt felt the same with him, and he's becoming concerned.
I get random thoughts/visualizations of self harming things and have just turned to making jokes about death.",2.953481605351172,4.965574823076924,4.2040802675585285,85.05570234113712,75.76923076923076,7.752508361204014,28.996655518394647,8.587818076936951,2.2566638795986624,1034,46,208,21,23,339,151,260,0.175,0.735,0.09,-0.9626,2,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,4,16,11,1,0,7,0,13,10,3,2,0,42,32,21,1,3,7,0,2,0,1,1,4,0,1,1,8,22,2,4,2,2,7,6,8,4,0,0,6,4,25,7,34,25,3,35,0,2,2,2,8,13,1,5,16,126,33,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18991977555666148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263596767915036,0.0,0.0,0.1878278203083487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17550784220535004,0.0,0.06956862160790454,0.2520808618828884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093295473087004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163565062612939,0.0,0.0,0.0983072833721902,0.0,0.12332695198805628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253592973891223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681023012459348,0.0,0.0,0.4012556488410456,0.0,0.0,0.1167768235131226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12727786102004535,0.3015099611764743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025668360917356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095764494949938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817152700191191,0.1055053296058708,0.1192496288342558,0.0,0.0648590106116436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12130793558619507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247773028407847,0.0,0.12217155879122225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324995649528274,0.10143820355241248,0.0,0.0,0.06271928674285547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457927300665415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617831724746357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500963803675378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129521135480498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709716652117288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905569180549333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420591085198435,0.0,0.0,0.0878578398885983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19082469923322734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172814013402056,0.09974896240620924,0.0,0.13051015932682822,0.0,0.07581857721512203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654632607656161,0.13116816607533632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12413358816128987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154298164457142,0.13897166848923748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308326154821571,0.0,0.0,0.08107005451776819,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Margotacos,2020/02/10,"Are these signs of depression ? Are these signs of depression ?

I don’t know if it’s normal to feel the way I feel. 
These days, nothing particular happened but I feel bored, even though I have no reasons to feel this way: When I’m home, I can watch movies, play video games, draw, read.. These are things I always do, but now they all feel boring and useless. I don’t feel sad either, just bored. Nothing really excites me, exept maybe seeing my friends and my boyfriend? I have no plans for the future, no ambitions, and even when I think about the things I could do after my studies, I’m still not excited at all. It’s like I’m always neutral? The only times I feel good is when I’m with my boyfriend and when I have sex... Maybe it’s just some sort of seasonal depression? Even death doesn’t scare me as much as it used to (I don’t want to die though, I just don’t care much). 
Is there something wrong with me??",2.011014308426073,3.95093057837838,2.750333863275042,94.72670906200321,78.35135135135134,6.082670906200319,21.152623211446734,7.048011613610866,0.3205834658187605,707,19,158,8,17,221,96,185,0.278,0.629,0.092,-0.9915,0,0,1,0,0,1,33.0,0,0,1,1,16,17,0,1,4,0,17,1,0,2,2,34,35,15,2,4,8,0,7,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,11,6,0,0,10,4,0,0,9,10,0,0,0,9,22,7,15,34,6,14,0,5,2,1,3,1,0,3,12,101,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137030719425054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092761275466713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252889839618727,0.0,0.0,0.0828170273566108,0.0,0.3318108572948016,0.0,0.13327445704577426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544506150129217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4545132446136835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921308153899212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770837800196638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11355692730887244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128810677779607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057350509027044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273706422423947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25802018010302913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887995462163936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581939824612182,0.2464352399243875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976653656387462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844971348843404,0.0,0.08226591327911591,0.13203196900975986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856577970974567,0.0,0.10233009923167792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886011197830573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255235499342066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17062639015543327,0.08228312284965901,0.2523340974647351,0.0,0.07487979736373514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109092970908202,0.0,0.0,0.07574247204417457,0.2038596401363699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14040160265811175,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mjustsleepy,2020/02/10,"How will I know if my therapist is good or not? Its my first time going to therapy. I choose my therapist completely randomly on a whim. We had 4 or 5 meetings so far and I like him. He is nice to talk to. But I dont know if he is a good therapist? I have no progress with my mental healt (Its getting worse, even) but I like talking with him. While in therapy I feel calmer, less alone, content, but I soon as I leave, nothing's changed. 

How do you know if your therapist is good or not? I dont have enough therapy experience to compaire my current therapist.",0.6862943143812714,2.942335060869566,2.9434782608695684,89.71528428093647,85.34782608695652,7.3645484949832785,26.23745819397993,8.384062270229773,2.009294314381272,432,20,95,11,13,147,68,115,0.062,0.755,0.183,0.9307,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,2,0,2,5,6,0,0,2,0,11,0,0,2,0,23,17,15,0,3,11,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,1,20,6,9,15,2,9,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,7,7,66,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11933899223395884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189342773382755,0.0,0.12081187045535108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700871372917928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905886735216953,0.0,0.0761054353823312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11271276655780872,0.0,0.0,0.05826153568419287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801085362620242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060200630759927036,0.0,0.0654853752997866,0.2899373499872763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899749622523608,0.0,0.0,0.12200729445982204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258683545691292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612032374384346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056209017440764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852279775957419,0.0,0.0,0.39531161591993225,0.6689291299695813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06718898572225969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742475092057562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ghosttlyy,2020/02/10,"Anti depressants When do you know you need to start taking/considering anti depressants or any other medication? The thought has been floating around in my head. But I like to tell myself I can improve on my own and don’t need medication. That never goes well. 

For reference I don’t currently speak to a therapist but will be going for the first time in a few weeks. I’ve never talked about the possibility of me having any kind of mental illness with anyone.",4.038534482758621,6.484789448275862,5.469640804597702,75.21756465517242,74.0574712643678,8.48793103448276,25.81752873563219,9.188382445141503,2.4775528735632184,370,13,64,9,8,124,64,87,0.139,0.818,0.043,-0.7317,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,1,4,5,0,0,5,0,9,4,1,0,2,13,15,5,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,2,1,1,2,1,9,3,13,11,2,13,0,2,0,0,5,4,0,1,9,49,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645573225178098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601125229370492,0.0,0.0,0.1731619341903677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350755058768415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16545659991716102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054885393330843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996312105888668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025601823936805,0.10690180444554137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503149039584308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39191210346481387,0.19602802380653794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2884647214360344,0.3000479815935639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192894052664974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768058236065228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15634590582899607,0.17001698562857032,0.0,0.0,0.2258499652547104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15442527338450235,0.11342479652187988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603031268917486,0.0,0.1748947133898024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jessscaa,2020/02/10,"quetiapine tablet no imprint I’m not sure if this is the right place to ask this. But my medication brand has recently changed. I’m unsure as to what brand as my medication comes in weekly blister packs so I don’t receive the packing. Anyway, the 3 100mg tablets that I take at night have no imprint, which they usually do. I thought by law (I’m in the UK) that prescription medication has to have a unique imprint. I’m a bit worried as to what it is they’ve given me. Has anyone else had this? It’s getting to me a bit, but I haven’t noticed any difference when I do take them, still knock me out. 
Thanks in advance. 
For some reason I can’t seem to be able to post a photo. So I’ve linked it. 
https://ibb.co/5hLR7C9",1.2347704081632642,3.5382401088435387,3.0040093537414947,89.88927933673472,83.28571428571428,6.123979591836736,24.153486394557824,7.413659706084162,1.095299659863946,564,22,121,9,16,187,88,147,0.06,0.9109999999999999,0.028999999999999998,0.0178,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,1,5,2,0,0,8,0,14,3,0,1,1,13,27,9,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,11,2,0,0,4,0,0,3,6,0,0,0,3,0,13,2,17,23,3,17,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,3,6,75,24,0,0.16302002099615584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11085920447210416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139873890847964,0.1670332763253575,0.0,0.0,0.15240171354618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35595128222507466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724535665305406,0.14042731330904604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032122489820611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13618230927008376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517123256725392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4926765617327423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15298324642581118,0.0,0.0,0.1855993743935475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032122489820611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561281172183587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16761173253020464,0.16096260385183206,0.0,0.0,0.13921820720445532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840730451110112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018799934907588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15364444052617485,0.0,0.2451415353943463,0.0,0.0,0.15008693290269787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941968715789873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17954352183217692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076482762703448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655547445017263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRAchopsuey,2020/02/10,"I [M27] have chronic pain, mood swings and memory gaps. I had an affair [F26] I barely remember having it. It feels like another person. I don't know how to tell my wife [F27]of a relationship of 11 years.   Hello everyone. I hope you are well. I write this at my wits end and looking for any help that can be provided. I have a doctor appointment coming up this Wednesday (via phone) and a face to face one in 3 weeks.

 I have been hesitate about going to a therapist but I have allied to a few yesterday as I know I need help. I will try to make this as clear as possible as I fear this is going to come across as rambling. I \[m27\] suffer from long term pain, I have not been pain free for 10 years. The pain is 24/7 and I have forgotten what its like to be pain free. It has some what taken over my life. Started as a permeate headache, I just woke up one day and it never left. 

In the past 3 years it spread to my entire body. My doctor thinks I may have fibromyalgia, but I have not been diagnosed yet. The pain of my head and body is still 24/7. 

Stress is a large trigger for my pain. And I have had a lot of additional stress in the last few months (family dog passing away, close family passing away, my dad being made redundant, my mom not reacting well to her cancer treatment).   

I have been in an amazing relationship for 11 years. And got married late last year. 

But, either due to to the constant pain or maybe due to my medication I have been getting mood swings ( super down moments where suicide is heavy on my mind, but far less often, I have super highs where I seem unstoppable) and gaps in my memory. The memory gaps started off small a couple of years ago but they have proceeded to get worse. I am loosing half of my days at work, loosing evenings and no recollection of conversions (this has lead to me double booking events, missing events etc) and a lot of other memories have a white lens flair over it, obscuring it making it hard to look back.

 \[I have tried to keep dairies but I forget where I put them. I started keeping a digital dairy on my phone but I seemed to rewrite or deleted the entries, and forget did it\] 

  I have been going to the doctors for 11 years. I have mentioned my memory loss in part but not to its full extent. Yes I know this is a mistake, I honestly am worried about losing my job. I would not be able to support my future family if I can't work. 

But yes I would not be able to support a family if I let my illness take me over. My wife does know, but not the the extent that I previously reviled but I have told her now. That is the background.   I met someone at work \[F26\] about a year ago. I would unexpectedly developed feelings for someone else (I believe an emotional affair though I do not recall talking about anything that personal just work stuff, tv shows books etc). 

Though like most of my friends, I now have large gaps in the freindships.   The main way I communicated with people (when not face to face) was via the messenger app. But either problems with the app at the time or problems with my phone was making ti a hassle so I moved to whatsapp for most people. But this friend used snapchat so we started chatting via that. Which of course is a massive mistake, as I can not look back on the conversations.   \[With my memory loss conversations have become hard.

 But stuff bleeds in, I am able to get some stuff, and though just by having other conversations I am able to pick up on new running jokes etc. But it has gotten so much harder.\]   I didn't realise about this “emotional affair” until to late. My friend now lived in a different city and I visited her in her new city. And this is where it gets super worrying. \[My friend does not know about my mood swings or memory gaps\].   

The emotional affair went against everything believe in, and now the affair turned physical. We went out for drinks with her friends. But stuff happened before we didn't have sex but we got to “second base”. Again I don't remember this, I get minor flashes but I cant “view” it. After we went for drinks more stuff happened, I guess “3rd base”. Again I get flashes but I can not view it fully. I see moments when I really try to focuses. 

The more I try to look back my pain spikes. I do know that we did not have, as we talked about t after wards. I stayed the for 1 night 2 days. I cant not remember most of it. Its like it was somebody else, as cliched as this sounds. I planned to end this friendship after this. Which sucks as she was one of my best friends-but it was the right thing to do. I slowed down my interaction with her but I did not cut contact with her. I wanted to end things face to face. She was my friend and she delivered that. We met up a second time a few weeks ago. My plan was to be honest, talk about the mood swings and my memory gaps.

 That didn't happen. I get flashes of the weekend. Some normal things, watching films, take away food (I cant remember food being delivered, what films bar 1 etc). we left on good terms but I knew something had happened and was off. From what i can tell more messing about- i didn't even cut things off like I planned So I was going to be honest over the phone and cut things off over the phone, which I hated but as I kept loosing such large gaps I had to it. As i said i planned to cut things off but it had been to weeks and haven't been able to call her. She is on shift work which made it hard to find a good time.

 Then Friday evening I got a message from her (my friend's) mom. telling me not to contact her daughter (my friend) ever again and that I had forced myself and no means no. And to never contact her again.   From what I can tell I was/had forced myself. I don't think anything happened but what I had done is fucking disgusting, and now I have also done something that is sexual harassment? Assault? This was killing me I couldn't believe I could have even done something like this. 

I gave an apology but I couldn't remember doing this shit, some flash backs but noting as bad as what I apparently did so the apology was generic as i cant recall most of it. Then yesterday received a message from my former friend. 

She talked about how she did at one point value the friendship. That I ruined it and that I had no respect for my marriage. She did reveal that I tried to kiss her, and tried to unbutton her jeans. And that I kept trying. Though yes still fucking shit, at least I know I'm not a rapist. I said sorry and wished her good luck. 

I did not tell her about the mood swings or memory gaps as, it sounds fake. It sounds like a cop-out. Sadly my friendship has ended with her hating me. Though this isn't how I wanted to do it. I am glad that it did. I know I have to tell my wife what happened, but I don't know how. I barely remember what has happened.

 Like I said, it sounds like a cliche but it feel like it is a different person. My friend unfriended me and my wife on Facebook (but kept other friends of mine). So my wife may realise something is up on her own.   I need to tell her. But I really don't now how. I am looking for a therapist at this very moment. I might tell her AFTER I have seen a therapist, to try and sort out my mind. 

  I know this isn't an easy situation. But any help that can be providence would be grateful.

 \---- How should I tell my wife? When? Has anyone had a situation similar to this?

   \----- How can I ever gain trust of my self again? If I can not gain trust how will my wife be able to? 

\------ Mental illness is an explanation, not an excuse. But if I cant remember, if it doesn't feel like me., How can I take responsibility? 

  Thank you for any help 

 TL/DR: I \[M27\] have chronic pain, mood swings and memory gaps. I had an affair \[F26\] I barely remember having it. It feels like another person. I don't know how to tell my wife \[F27\]of a relationship of 11 years.",1.8216536094925644,4.002097970719291,3.0968889242520667,90.79611567432146,80.11394016549968,6.31973918294733,21.910105436680865,7.468242284971852,0.7698909530104956,6076,186,1289,90,156,1965,474,1571,0.131,0.7240000000000001,0.145,0.9736,5,0,6,0,0,1,242.0,9,2,2,19,71,98,16,3,68,3,157,43,11,20,5,227,258,119,2,24,67,12,8,12,11,10,22,7,0,5,97,55,5,5,33,12,2,17,48,43,2,7,67,26,216,51,177,166,35,170,0,7,11,5,127,62,5,31,101,915,313,12,0.17774750711893406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878122019502469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023690769537434337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060437200031305836,0.062127919768283024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02071419830215857,0.0,0.04875701776325053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349981701418722,0.09111790751708644,0.024735290654329598,0.0,0.032718026116744514,0.025208339472618718,0.10013028624224804,0.03108917376193213,0.0,0.0,0.06581247003400226,0.0,0.0,0.030250013021852217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051037912847692574,0.0,0.03201365153946757,0.0,0.02365282016469641,0.032779039302580464,0.0,0.05731621870366749,0.0,0.0,0.03006832969501448,0.0,0.06190277110362485,0.0,0.09096605267150147,0.05184934709969738,0.09094870619950636,0.0,0.0580416292646178,0.0,0.0,0.04949507804530727,0.0999710106742018,0.10495435536809963,0.0,0.13215697057944406,0.07826703471692742,0.05359426547530195,0.0,0.028307560042369374,0.026624666362179347,0.0,0.11170968705913707,0.033335893709552616,0.07489540026195816,0.08465523640093182,0.0,0.0,0.02707633355651754,0.0,0.07164433038573062,0.0,0.2517666856436105,0.05477490204876104,0.10834335891380424,0.0,0.06734533632573281,0.07454308789900323,0.07108045949340233,0.0,0.032634819753775,0.0,0.18337845577930253,0.0,0.07961342660505534,0.05849628803329548,0.030403370410178612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942693817678405,0.03130000004774708,0.0,0.029423896812519675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02939782898754332,0.05266338377731111,0.032775213523826445,0.0,0.1790898659250571,0.0482959806485606,0.06683564338887113,0.0,0.06437439552230284,0.030293144798527405,0.02092472014939891,0.17367690720985565,0.0,0.0261590508785516,0.026216825068733882,0.12438594927192292,0.03314233240243285,0.0,0.05037152474717062,0.0,0.05606299633028658,0.05932392061695064,0.0,0.029761876964955636,0.032269857286632696,0.0,0.02984365223935953,0.02985461341934005,0.031427002641259465,0.059824770690544316,0.06939191069140714,0.023646060728699743,0.03148624503502576,0.02177747827045174,0.04393250809940163,0.0456966117587844,0.057223216663429985,0.0,0.02780066574746131,0.02902580293456566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029754064362038,0.0,0.3152264661760074,0.0,0.0,0.0320805381402808,0.028280018015779913,0.04107591364597892,0.10346817811686376,0.0,0.0,0.028004807883169364,0.03339726787048252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669345299587904,0.0,0.02978088980756991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037956534848477365,0.0,0.0,0.0954171512490829,0.26847103434674513,0.025299233313948483,0.08453929151983565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023606958354410863,0.05393821825052765,0.03090490253598765,0.0,0.060818420585757836,0.0,0.06659854844343012,0.0,0.0,0.05020162865647013,0.0912258099584368,0.0,0.033162296969483585,0.08387373360011993,0.03157586542173693,0.047316462930331975,0.0,0.06786972295286674,0.0,0.16956530827723829,0.03240448720005177,0.06723525489176971,0.0,0.0,0.06682200220161989,0.09524447551086412,0.2589319262674305,0.027274337237398125,0.0,0.10318927782649838,0.11808754560405575,0.037964475144014236,0.14553001939247162,0.0,0.051823000404319114,0.0,0.0,0.028307560042369374,0.0,0.16090518624127545,0.032223041043973714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02558612937149834,0.0,0.024443384766329818,0.03494669499261932,0.023514616280928418,0.07128916432322932,0.0,0.0532721185057897,0.08238685993766165,0.0,0.0,0.034066810179968286,0.0,0.0,0.10783525178764712,0.060170407182865426,0.030189982524759764,0.0841778194881138,0.0,0.0,0.1716953503554858
mentalhealth,SUPERsundryGirl,2020/02/10,"Important Reminder, Please stay. Note: (trigger warning regarding suicide)

Considering the times in the past I tried, and still have moments where I feel like this, (also considering how hard it is for this topic to be discussed for many reasons), and that there may be people that feel alone and fight those dark days, I found this and wanted to share it..


[Original Source](https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=576786929408398&id=100012312880827)


_----------_

Don’t kill yourself today

Because your Netflix trial still has a week left

Don’t kill yourself today

Because no one else will finish off the chicken in the fridge

Don’t kill yourself today

Because I know for a fact that Starbucks is releasing a new Frappuccino sometime next month

Yes, your mother will miss you

Yes your bully will make a sappy Facebook post about how what a a wonderful person you were

And yes

Suicide is a permanent solution to a temporary problem

You know that

You’ve known that

Everyone and anyone has been shoving that down your throat since they first learned what the word suicide meant

So don’t kill yourself

Until you finish your shampoo and conditioner at the same time

Don’t kill yourself

Until Doctor Who is finally cancelled

Don’t kill yourself

Until you tell someone your best pasta recipe 

Don’t kill yourself 

Because I will keep coming up with reasons for you not to

And I need you

To hear all of them

Don’t kill yourself

I love you

You’re important

It’s a bad day

Not a bad life

There is more to this

The world will keep spinning on its axis without you

But

Think of all the sunrises you’d miss

I know this sounds pointless

But when you’re sitting in front of everything deadly you own

Revising your goodbyes

There will be too much darkness 

To see anything else

But this is not about seeing anything else

This is about turning off the lights

This is about finding the bed instead of the noose

This is about giving yourself one more day

Even if it takes ten thousand of those

One more morning’s

Until

“I can’t wait for tomorrow”

This is about staying alive

Because there’s gonna be a new Marvel movie

No one should miss that

This is about staying alive

Because the future is coming 

And it’s ready for you

I don’ t need you to see it

I just need you to believe you can make it 

Until then",5.4455527743012055,7.606184380614657,4.772224308162978,83.00720588235295,69.26004728132388,6.962286191072175,29.69885968571825,7.618777277803332,1.9226351550549303,1855,73,321,21,34,556,203,423,0.17800000000000002,0.7240000000000001,0.098,-0.9906,0,1,0,0,1,3,40.0,0,22,2,2,23,19,9,0,23,3,40,5,1,8,3,56,72,24,12,7,9,1,3,1,0,9,2,2,1,1,31,12,1,3,14,1,0,3,15,15,0,7,4,9,35,4,43,54,9,51,0,3,3,1,34,12,0,3,32,222,66,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073538532956432,0.0,0.05461731062848863,0.0,0.07400007500636087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04775504659320702,0.0,0.112405685272754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405075305964744,0.24980033008357866,0.0,0.0,0.07694764745640548,0.07167378239256622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176641195815728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213828770070504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699051607076516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116084270143522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0451097097157452,0.0,0.0,0.06526097843827654,0.06138119197796666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906631435992366,0.048791590914046785,0.0,0.07481633256327787,0.06242247716774859,0.058093631996970735,0.0,0.07488444300442369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551697487651223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061180948473284535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697599894234934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141152215286842,0.6044865752857207,0.0,0.11260319788477567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742051952176386,0.0,0.04824038908521177,0.03336660147702675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061640962254163385,0.0,0.09117793028816604,0.06924272285621692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054514237788637294,0.0,0.05020635963399087,0.15192470454128626,0.0,0.1319238784003778,0.07263493274422372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18512001955472399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0651974823403892,0.04734873494519602,0.0596345510795145,0.0,0.07496990482105914,0.0,0.0,0.06540991571204323,0.0,0.0,0.06535127379431008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044195872569007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16327227050172302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05649621628500856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057868064227587876,0.0,0.06754775687998528,0.0,0.0,0.21838744166296026,0.10908459303627936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241184196695936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051351055317086634,0.0,0.059694833577418414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04376213969140486,0.0,0.0,0.07964938711145297,0.0,0.19421350867989054,0.0,0.0,0.046369370382777685,0.07428782924557746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040283505625154224,0.0,0.054783958876680944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583614131365619,0.07406548745433587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mort0O,2020/02/10,"I want to kill myself but I have no reason to. Im 15 and i live in a wealthy family in Australia, I always laugh and am smiling but I just feel so so lost. Im at the time in my life were I seriously need to think about my future but whenever I do I see myself commiting suicide. I have self diagnosed myself with anxiety from a government website, I'm to worried to actually go to a doctor because you know. I am really happy right now but I worry I won't be in the future.",-0.14088235294117624,1.9895652058823536,3.689705882352944,83.74867647058825,88.11764705882355,6.9294117647058835,22.225490196078432,8.07648339933343,1.565219607843137,369,14,77,9,12,138,65,102,0.23399999999999999,0.604,0.162,-0.8109999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,2,7.0,0,1,0,1,5,5,1,0,5,0,8,3,0,1,1,15,17,8,2,2,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,2,18,2,14,13,0,11,0,1,1,0,2,6,0,0,4,56,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.18838529324370665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606299450390349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476798532511823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767920252185834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959378806784627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19759101746950591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18198682430679552,0.0,0.09760998464990522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971263291880054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055013233509196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4170461549126559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21357707401044745,0.0,0.10609317068602628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635427579281012,0.0,0.0,0.17046337597373512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107327866980505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431413486748055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367037131001644,0.19848369733439447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16486044315081924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538328678760939,0.0,0.20138934110729464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21116126538626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369624246240896,0.0,0.0,0.11256682111061872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386368020811301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3920956761667277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MoonshineSideburns,2020/02/10,"Is it unfair that peer work, consumer representative/advocacy positions are given to people with a history of experience in similar roles? Would I offend too many people by saying people in these roles tend to look the same, too, the same ones who are vocal about discrimination?  

It seems like advisory committees, boards and panels are stacked with the same people.   The effects of mental ill-health on many of us affects our ability to participate in activism, affiliate or network with consumer and other peers to 'represent' their views.  How many of the most severely affected by mental ill-health will not be given a second look in peer work? The disheveled, those with strange language patterns, beliefs or motor behaviour? 

Sure, they might be 'inconvenient' relative to someone neurotypical, but would you say the same about someone with a physical disability whose problems get in the way of them expressing their views, particularly in the context of consumer advocacy?

Less 'attractive' views aren't any less valid, and our voices should be heard by non-profits, service delivery organisations or elsewhere.  I, for one, am frustrated. I want to partner with an organisation that really wants to work with me, and doesn't demand a marketable, cookie cutter story of mental ill-health?   I don't want to work with an organisation who demands a peer work 'qualification' like that certificate, a barrier to entry to peer work that again filters for 'higher functioning'. I do have a higher level of education, but on principle, the same principles behind the case I've made above, it seems absurd! The most relevant qualification, to me, is our lived experience!  Are we going to let these opportunities to continue to be given out the way they do? I get that organisations are risk averse, and want people who are 'proven' or might not 'rock the boat'. If you are a decision maker who gatekeeps voices you want to hear, you agree with already, people you know, people with a nice CV, then you're the problem.",11.321358069164267,10.183873331412103,10.823168227665708,56.09365724063403,56.319884726224785,13.862319884726224,42.14859510086456,12.709666756460704,5.633801296829972,1614,71,242,45,16,528,180,347,0.07,0.852,0.078,-0.5064,0,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,5,5,5,8,6,11,2,1,26,0,27,0,0,6,1,58,47,14,0,11,9,0,0,2,1,6,0,6,0,1,17,17,0,1,6,1,0,1,5,5,0,3,5,11,23,6,50,31,9,16,1,0,5,0,28,10,0,11,5,174,40,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998443499106441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06152791278605457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17700902951896508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945416881572054,0.0,0.05142054038552643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885205714088542,0.10197490081474583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04972415685189998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251953946643708,0.0,0.08840563092122458,0.0,0.0798934331928569,0.0,0.1519568974336839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561215146337017,0.0,0.2751904447785325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735406082342555,0.19196500267751468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12262001073253392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4390807305208689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17314980655939702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05796230710410768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439029366943516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16473493080261434,0.0,0.10221400464203463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332285883991445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527412569639564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883348719152587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668303462792309,0.1436339134487772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952128932137301,0.0,0.0,0.1285454703386845,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashleeturner1,2020/02/10,"How can I express my emotion Hi 👋🏻 I don’t know if this is the right place to post this but, I am having trouble lately with my mental health, feeling deeply sad and just find my self wanting to cry and ball and scream, but this feeling is constant, I want to try and channel this feeling into something positive; has anyone here felt this way, if so what did you do? 

Thanks 😊",4.314805194805197,4.804645935064933,4.821194805194806,87.92607792207794,70.16883116883116,6.679480519480518,29.685714285714287,5.6839178017228535,1.213516363636364,295,11,61,1,5,94,57,77,0.174,0.657,0.16899999999999998,-0.5251,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,9,1,0,1,0,20,17,10,0,4,5,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,6,6,0,0,6,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,5,8,1,5,15,0,7,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,2,2,41,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15771283615774273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437441076118779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24776084692276198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537182692598073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3421411483519073,0.0,0.2165675342403816,0.0,0.2061525768779788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397537118128067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395876433134682,0.0,0.2544351155069304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22730571978093256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356562743671059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21601870494777492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19262217056903785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353023640611431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17364274747037928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20766012844361653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15313658839476366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26607558261384584,0.17903453325730667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Windowmaker66,2020/02/10,"I keep having breakdowns daily, every little thing sets me off. might be because i have either bad bronchitis or pneumonia, but everything is just setting me off mentally, every day I almost break something because i just keep tgetting mad. Getting shit on by reddit doesn't help/",8.652585034013605,9.747036571428572,8.118775510204085,65.94646258503404,60.83673469387754,9.798639455782316,38.78231292517007,9.725611199111238,4.34511700680272,228,11,30,4,3,72,40,49,0.218,0.782,0.0,-0.9091,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,6,1,1,0,0,9,9,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,4,7,1,8,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,3,1,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475308670906935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20639815157336752,0.3013765071456283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594208286038631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4165462135409034,0.0,0.2221636284855846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291495928259025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16569012119078216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4394379358276631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24775511299935896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491152059541565,0.2622356593781088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537429166678269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903033889345961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642258927209241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Upbeat_Stretch,2020/02/10,":( I'm struggling to deal with my mum, she's ignoring me My mum and I got in a fight because I wouldn't let my grandma yell at the cat and she thought it was ok. It's been two days, the other night after my mum screamed at me I told her she was a bad mum and a worse person for all the abuse she's made me endure. It was finally after I couldn't take her yelling anymore. She also called me ungrafteul for not putting up with her yelling because she buys thing for me but she treat me like that because I deserve to be respected. Today I tried to be nice to her but she won't even look at me and keeps ignoring me. She said to me at one point without looking up after I tried talking to her ""don't call me mum"" which hurt my feels, it feels like I'm being disowned but for what? for standing up to her? because I decided to value myself and not let her tear me down she's punishing me. I'm really upset and frustrated please help.",1.3637878787878783,3.09859315656566,3.003030303030304,93.12454545454548,79.55555555555556,6.016161616161617,24.131313131313128,6.937597516519254,0.7406646464646465,727,26,164,8,18,240,100,198,0.172,0.6970000000000001,0.131,-0.8017,0,0,0,0,4,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,2,16,3,2,6,1,13,0,0,1,1,25,27,10,0,2,6,5,2,2,0,2,0,5,0,1,9,8,0,3,4,0,1,1,7,10,0,2,9,9,43,6,28,10,1,19,0,1,2,0,31,10,0,0,9,115,52,0,0.0,0.17310884710693314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683897733322465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144895488675872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199038361862027,0.35625353657555736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983761739107025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422471998868916,0.1506263719745973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650003433594813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14774871638918322,0.10437642423727728,0.0,0.16004932655831342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685237693470946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793014758998124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15640690041850794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986357183808336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988016115622176,0.0,0.14275765499253942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453804142510389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382467367114576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710830920809167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990035646198524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757200751334816,0.0,0.16037785290535328,0.13811510463232055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468744484509789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093597692295336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389779586242834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15273918063470662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985170670598204,0.11743252047748688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706472417711802,0.0,0.0,0.11598991980513905,0.0,0.0,0.1384891070696529,0.1396082284673425,0.0,0.1983894758920384,0.0,0.1427219645506735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14083863401800215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14889202642097293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FloatingMeat,2020/02/10,"Can a very quick assessment be accurate? So I have decided to get some mental help and found a group of psychologists that advertise assessments within two weeks of a single session. I thought this may be absolutely perfect, but how reliable/accurate can something based on a single session be, especially regarding disorders like ADHD and autism? I know next to nothing about this (except for what google told me lol) so I´d appreciate any advice.

I guess I´m not exactly sure what exactly an assessment is.",7.954696969696967,9.710274772727278,8.366363636363637,61.20287878787883,62.63636363636363,13.13939393939394,39.66666666666666,12.45797560212912,6.108403030303031,412,22,60,16,6,136,68,88,0.027999999999999997,0.8340000000000001,0.139,0.8713,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,5,1,8,0,0,1,4,17,14,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,5,3,9,7,3,5,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,4,44,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983703144745413,0.24260496121903855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16883099353667694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845370415197781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27221343464015496,0.0,0.0,0.12970996755340444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734955808706989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664090437555417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644179404022586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129137676558754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25019610650210744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26403620997746874,0.0,0.0,0.2382201805550712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19112910744739608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339899845839893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970973404519798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372310506150245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24252210609575015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20484739200497865,0.0,0.0,0.19914589747466466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SpiritualBudget6,2020/02/10,Struggling to Get Help For the past 6 months I’ve been dealing with bouts of self harm and my anxiety disorder and possibly adhd but I can’t seem to get help. I know I need to see a mental health professional but every time I pick up the phone something in my head is stopping me. I’ve gone to therapy before so idk what’s wrong with me. I want help but I’ve just internalized this for so long I’m afraid of losing myself.,1.296017478152308,3.4053130337078663,3.2486891385767787,89.38429463171038,81.58426966292134,6.652184769038702,21.124843945068665,7.793537801064563,0.8580851435705377,336,10,73,6,9,113,63,89,0.20800000000000002,0.682,0.111,-0.7961,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,2,3,0,3,2,1,1,0,14,12,7,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,2,1,10,0,12,10,0,8,0,1,1,0,6,2,0,1,5,38,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270893173406288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455141164002022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16078829370984532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19480613251961826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21656082854838407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15920422812956153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19744422655351707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19392415976430774,0.2008522101977378,0.0,0.0,0.37996121912098507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038456989928512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16722079508132373,0.0,0.21139429204926186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19042398077337816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508234908394801,0.0,0.0,0.1401090504864368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18038061760394766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130203665853633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057408115310456,0.17201914643508726,0.1971231207604138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454681529246312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15797632041177848,0.0,0.1975386426268076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160885339230473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018221197507386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145159848321286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065945647605116,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bobonthebeat,2020/02/10,"Emotional numbness or depression? I (15M) have been feeling so numb and down the last year, I lost a loved one and had no reaction to that, reunited with old friends and felt very little happiness doing that even though I care about them. I feel like I'm living my life on autopilot because I can have fun when I'm around other people and really devoured to a certain subject, however the moment when I tun my mind to myself and become introspective, I lose all feeling of emotion and catch myself staring off at meaningless things for a few minutes a time even though there is a bustling atmosphere around me. I don't really know what to do about the situation other than the obvious, which is to speak to a therapist. Please share your thoughts in the comments, especially if you have had a similar experience.

Sorry if my grammar isn't good; English isn't my first language.",12.416000000000004,8.21065917575758,11.58348484848485,60.99522727272729,57.24242424242424,15.363636363636365,47.5,13.023866798666859,6.010090909090907,704,33,122,18,6,230,112,165,0.129,0.696,0.17600000000000002,0.8088,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,3,12,14,0,0,12,0,14,4,0,0,3,22,25,14,0,2,3,0,4,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,7,9,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,5,0,2,6,6,18,9,19,19,2,17,0,3,1,1,8,8,0,3,9,92,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681587441887215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181356757558916,0.16634254576324398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15356213338093408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972456574311667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388434326433997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989597073750568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733046949351675,0.0,0.0,0.22846656154153475,0.1075994582074852,0.14461411650649458,0.0,0.0,0.12811312791974366,0.0,0.0,0.11636485337109385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632880078532122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603325756294792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277412055270075,0.1227714095976964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063839000132442,0.07358293045778815,0.15095589915090926,0.1329958935285997,0.0,0.0,0.16849977210363815,0.16441417461424296,0.0,0.13593600900655528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15207831641277542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804521225187398,0.0,0.10206069034793896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441754678358277,0.0,0.0,0.16533015196867332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19297578076740168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16929768398447612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168601274464949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17487574085187835,0.10006198055582408,0.0,0.2959571439223083,0.11957156627813773,0.08782487657400077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427323196679352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699118689677166
mentalhealth,imsodamntired1,2020/02/10,"Suicidal again I've had thoughts of suicide on and off for 10 years now. I actually tried to kill myself six years ago.

I got them under control most of last year but around new years they came back yet again.

I always feel like I'm wasting my life. I can't plan long term and I live day to day because that's all I know. I got used to it because it's really hard for me to function and I was convinced I would die very soon.

I turned 25 in November and I felt so much pressure. People commenting on my age makes me feel really self-conscious. Years ago I had a feeling that I'd lose my early 20s to mental illness just like I lost my adolescence and I turned out to be right. I don't feel like I've done anything worthwhile. When I was a teenager I couldn't wait for my life to begin because I was incredibly isolated and miserable. And I've never felt like it happened.

People have projects, ideas, dreams. I never let myself truly dream because I assumed it would only lead to disappointment. I struggle to get out of bed and I don't even function well enough to shower regularly.

I wanted to draw. I drew quite well as a young teen, but my depression completely overtook me and I barely did it since. Only here and there, very slowly, and my skills never truly improved. I used to think that by now I'd have a good skillset but I was stunted and now I have so many negative emotions associated with art that I cry and get frustrated nearly every time I try to draw or paint.

I feel worthless. I keep thinking about the person I could've become if it weren't for trauma and mental illness. Wishing I was better, wishing I had actual close friends, wishing I knew how to do the things I wanted to do. I'm obsessed with time. I'll never get the last ten years back and I'll keep drifting indefinitely, struggling to stay alive and surrounded by half-finished projects I will never finish.",2.9971875251185587,4.972767771883291,4.2023245719797435,85.28183425769632,75.52519893899205,6.691712884816332,26.278353830077968,7.5764669431780325,1.4555046861184793,1498,56,292,20,33,490,196,377,0.225,0.649,0.126,-0.9926,1,0,0,0,0,2,34.0,0,0,2,8,21,23,2,5,7,0,25,4,0,6,6,68,61,26,4,9,6,0,8,4,1,3,4,0,2,1,11,23,0,4,14,3,0,3,11,13,2,2,19,8,52,10,38,36,5,53,0,6,0,0,5,12,0,5,41,185,63,3,0.0,0.0,0.15206532262713468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13813182291743606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648305501861562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411644545790755,0.06935982961585435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982185571573918,0.0,0.1899821964853737,0.08604970661621493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890845324492788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911266789704521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169117100250614,0.0,0.08738698829527998,0.06220785534420055,0.0,0.08558468644843249,0.10049595262262813,0.0,0.06710706976313249,0.0,0.0808622571262182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973290175133341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764257464622292,0.0,0.08050581665172772,0.0,0.05146135154273514,0.0,0.06564576427644941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19697787380110893,0.11132331501041244,0.14961899543918947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06019603371511019,0.0,0.1221202851176477,0.0,0.0,0.06535042610341711,0.1246296188270096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889894476448337,0.0,0.06979549008276406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795523318708556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385067884989408,0.08620011176547374,0.0,0.04281940471869932,0.12702034501476664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796721725538855,0.11006568815963376,0.15225905191726666,0.0,0.06879934154420132,0.06895128995629182,0.0,0.08716564897987153,0.08505215201671464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05200808820390785,0.07899239709441555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15703763526002965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05727563176723291,0.0,0.3004597542932193,0.07524966493935607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851396109449487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080312823767976,0.06803135326151133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287095146589887,0.0,0.0,0.0998271923931272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665379872401988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128111967193039,0.0,0.0,0.0644511273825029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304577867865287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16290490926932027,0.0,0.17045017365435097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05176248824832312,0.09984807568538194,0.0,0.061854879944662884,0.09086436459322196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579675573706994,0.16949575247738602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345850705055322,0.0,0.1285741432166339,0.09191119417140606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010778498344073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26879118662690016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069550230045523,0.0,0.0,0.3010437217440927
mentalhealth,annaf62,2020/02/10,"To everyone struggling to go to school or work this morning, I'm right here with you. Last semester I missed over 100 classes, and I'm only in 11th grade. This semester I want an almost-perfect attendance, and it might be one of the hardest things I'll attempt this year. Let's do it together. When you're getting ready and just feel like going back to bed or staying in, I hope you'll remember this post. Let's use each other as motivation, let's not let our currently horrible mental health get the better of us today :)",6.130517799352753,6.166326922330098,6.800145631067963,76.88461974110034,66.18446601941747,10.361812297734627,33.671521035598715,10.125756701596842,3.3186647249190946,415,17,79,9,6,137,75,103,0.079,0.759,0.162,0.7906,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,2,2,0,4,4,5,0,1,3,0,8,1,0,2,0,16,19,7,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,8,5,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,2,0,1,0,1,7,3,11,12,1,15,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,4,7,48,15,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15758971410044909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210127238766532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13918662126345924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503798776935988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957422762222421,0.11242971910189817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644453287691698,0.0,0.17888124982760442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16728373534401042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563102576595444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828275648188042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6437120547215813,0.0,0.07688615110041623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15859837823783882,0.16695147184693332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664230971347352,0.11969183054116796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072307158294931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827676267801648,0.13439857076339354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592733010121008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16774228414894116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164523965062995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455387558715697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491744090707503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18930441090226804,0.13592266517423468,0.0,0.0,0.09282466787882368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145718808022529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134523054136677
mentalhealth,goldenhecate,2020/02/10,"My poor work ethic/depression/gifted kid syndrome is ruining my life I'm failing one of my classes because I haven't turned in any work. Part of me is focused on yelling at myself for being stupid and lazy, part of me is saying ""GO MAKE UP THE WORK!! DO SOMETHING!!"" But won't actually do anything, and part of me is saying ""fuck it even if you tried youd fail so why try?"". Its fucked. I'm gonna be ineligible for my school choir, which is really REALLY important to me, but even with that incentive I cant get myself  to do anything?? I want to scream",2.7291052114060967,4.165307141592924,4.657109144542776,84.03624385447398,74.92920353982299,7.854080629301867,25.829891838741396,8.515128840125781,1.7114570304818089,429,15,90,8,9,147,77,113,0.18600000000000005,0.742,0.07200000000000001,-0.9109999999999999,0,0,1,0,1,0,20.0,0,2,0,5,3,7,3,0,1,0,14,3,0,1,0,8,24,6,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,5,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,1,1,1,3,7,0,1,0,5,15,0,14,19,3,5,0,3,0,2,5,4,2,1,0,59,19,7,0.0,0.0,0.16051717894434545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118579116275621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27072026076787703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027074451503154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172863827621692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30413418306630474,0.08593852221008637,0.0,0.09348268130410818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618318665112845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979744042301882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146175534983577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5343754837353883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107512617346707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616159275819249,0.0,0.1664712791655578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12663138658638054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22335397024105144,0.1789163996148601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701965804508456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14842540755088174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592490536522337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trafalgar-d-alis,2020/02/10,"Anyone know anything about this? Just recently figured reddit out, and found this sub i find the most suitable to share the post. 
 So there's a small weird occurance i didn't talk about for a while because i couldn't find words to explain, but now i kinda opened up so i wanted to know if other people also have experienced it.
 Basically, once in a while, if i focus too much on reality i end up dozing out so much that i momentarily forget about who am i and just existence in general. it lasts for about a few seconds, and it has turned into a fear. (which i kinda got over by myself recently)
 The closest explanation i've found was a post on reddit like 7 years ago and beside that, i couldn't really find anything throughout a bunch of searching on google.",6.9121644295302005,6.366793731543631,7.671065436241616,73.23800755033561,64.70469798657717,10.40302013422819,32.047818791946305,9.827888789773867,2.928630201342281,602,20,113,11,8,202,94,149,0.061,0.9009999999999999,0.037000000000000005,-0.4854,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,13,4,0,1,10,0,7,0,0,0,0,31,15,13,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,8,0,0,9,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,5,1,12,2,22,8,5,25,0,0,0,0,4,14,0,5,10,85,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678411747545392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242097635419509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578325301894388,0.0,0.272530273283292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094114613915603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666216507349106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863329760429849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4540343681086953,0.0,0.0,0.36311824739365656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13243616296701793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18200609822445774,0.13497663934808415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089812358692985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434530402694379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763462320572886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479814070721404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171758111911287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608016332511533,0.0,0.32699711850581314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309367620543894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801126193643437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766832318305683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663349469234908
mentalhealth,gravergrim,2020/02/10,"I feel crazy I started out feeling a way I can't explain. I went from feeling nothing to going out with friends and feeling new. Then something happened and I was convinced I was pregnant, maybe. I never took a test, but I don't know. That slowly turned into me borderline losing my mind. I started writing in journals and now I can't even recognize what I was feeling exactly.   
I can't even explain what any of it was. That turned to be staying and joking around at my friends, not exactly sure what happened there. I wasn't happy and I felt like I was losing it but looking back I think it was better than I feel now. My mind has obviously changed and I'm growing up I guess but this doesn't feel right.  
Now I find myself dwelling on my friend from two years ago that I haven't had a real conversation with since around June I guess. It could be a year at this point. I'm also starting to realize that we may not have been friends at all and it was all in my head. All the being head over heels and thinking I loved them all like family. It all just dissolved. It's gone. My friend group, it's gone. My best friend of over three years, planned on moving in with me, I loved her, and now it feels like shes dissolved too. I'm confused as to why I'm not upset, I think shell still come back but I don't know what to do.  
Everything feels like its repeating, it feels familiar, but it also feels like I'm in another universe.   
I started to get all lovey-dovey and I gave advice. I don't understand, I'm an asshole. I knew it was coming out of my mouth and I was aware I was saying it, but I don't know why and I don't understand why I cared. I don't get it. I contemplated suicide, I thought about death a lot. I ate raw meat. I had all my friends calling me crazy and telling me I'm not mentally here. Then when that crazy was gone and I was just a husk it seemed like no one gave a fuck. I don't understand what's happening and there's some shit I'm thinking of that I don't even know how to describe. Who the fuck am I, who is this, why am I here, where am I, and why on gods green earth do I look like this?",0.33107382550335274,2.475418574944072,2.0460407158836698,96.3166046979866,85.84563758389262,5.186738255033557,21.691677852348995,6.55674776486733,0.2803049127516779,1641,57,379,18,50,536,185,447,0.11900000000000001,0.696,0.184,0.9783,0,0,1,0,0,1,48.0,1,0,1,5,25,31,3,3,10,0,43,10,5,1,12,94,110,29,2,1,12,0,12,7,7,1,0,1,0,0,33,28,1,0,30,1,0,10,20,8,0,3,27,16,64,23,38,78,10,56,0,2,3,4,25,22,3,7,29,252,97,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564509056363846,0.059548814141039276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744366958652156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045683014085840884,0.07044148221033515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11960446232921768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331072544110052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049865788692197,0.059413053246700334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685957541179106,0.0,0.06849195409502787,0.0,0.07106490387048194,0.11573496242340806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05363577976117272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311034606254513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037481920857806,0.0,0.0633289828715263,0.0,0.3736366726812688,0.14397489126922905,0.06450094962333734,0.0,0.0613990320505219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633082722885645,0.1242090610028897,0.0701949582915754,0.0,0.03817853010716738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14800721374203302,0.0,0.17821456502805874,0.07151171430205794,0.0,0.0,0.1378870230241423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14767602247588407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297367852928469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282438768956653,0.15030891277495012,0.0,0.05711192130074656,0.12126066086412228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748884348911928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769913520099803,0.0,0.13566028079011022,0.0,0.0,0.07139906752961338,0.0,0.0,0.05181144123744355,0.06488046298104078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445863781204797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04552122300148893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350446574305595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646271955277628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057369231098235135,0.0,0.05342225655257336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061155887007364414,0.0,0.0,0.0689567541892726,0.05556993493056483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051716533349883916,0.0,0.0,0.19019436463808445,0.07160229316149495,0.053648050573624984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07348129849352472,0.0,0.06331401324943284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058716109426752476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17217855743156787,0.0,0.05333144342477338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07463669138859337,0.0,0.14613969248786926,0.06562267126914177,0.20980248801511706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05332238486702043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06227422979672865,0.3030862942631974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978035224497758
mentalhealth,CoolCummer,2020/02/10,"I feel so confused about who I am and lack self esteem I feel confused about who I am and lack self esteem..!

I don’t really know how to explain this
Like my life is literally quite empty I don’t work or in education I don’t have any friends I struggle to leave the house let alone talk to people and even online I really struggle to make conversation with people I’m so unsure of myself and what I want to do with myself 
I just feel like a broken man whose face even shows it
Wth can I do about this?",0.9840308747855956,3.095053698113212,3.085162950257292,90.10692109777015,82.77358490566037,5.741337907375644,18.12692967409949,6.980632752743323,0.0971433962264152,396,9,86,5,11,134,62,106,0.26,0.653,0.087,-0.9461,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,9,7,0,4,2,0,11,2,1,2,0,20,19,8,0,3,2,0,3,2,1,0,1,0,0,3,7,6,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,3,15,3,12,18,2,1,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,3,2,60,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19810622415599136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007553523828952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25267450577735234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901475695042943,0.13664897422288658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14778083564411865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22070902199186554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512133475539434,0.0,0.0,0.20253568404146172,0.0,0.19559461829858305,0.13510524172535904,0.18689744604441266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12767948751243505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652160316891681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034475978303468,0.0,0.0,0.2450750489921301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3990891441139029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39993039634946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537419353165159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282066476324795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13925259363340672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,duhmbish,2020/02/10,"Are there any outlets for assisting with payment of psychiatric services? My insurance does not cover my doctor that I’ve been seeing for 12 years. An appointment with him costs $300 for an hour. I definitely need to be seeing a psychiatrist but I’m having trouble paying the $300 since he wants to see me every 2 weeks. 

Are there any organizations or government assistance programs to help with paying for mental health services?",6.325384615384617,8.457963589743592,6.877435897435897,68.90923076923079,66.94871794871794,9.815384615384616,32.230769230769226,10.125756701596842,3.7616769230769243,352,15,54,9,6,115,59,78,0.046,0.88,0.075,0.2982,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,8,11,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,5,0,11,9,0,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,3,31,6,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369480651333556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535759054407263,0.21680195113218234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20873453066296765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633396884040405,0.0,0.0,0.16605720353692272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24397738121729726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496671145024981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18369861930501086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5922583312408559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20493593110183725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461254978862666,0.0,0.19872484141591165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15953865076671211
mentalhealth,arasara91,2020/02/10,"Help!!! OK so all through my childhood, my mom was very abusive, physically mentally emotionally and verbally. Us being from a very conservative background were not much aware of Mental health issues and solutions. This has been an ongoing process for the 28 years of my life. But now it’s come to a point where she will pick up a knife and laugh maniacally and pointed the knife right into my face. She did the same with my younger sister. How can we reach out to get help for her? We live in Toronto. Please let me know if anyone can help me in anyway. The only thing I’m worried about is we also have a 15-year-old sister. So we don’t want child servicesOr anybody getting involved that might take her away from us even though my mom has never laid a hand on her thankfully.",4.730581818181818,6.176050240000002,5.068181818181817,83.01409090909091,69.93333333333334,8.121212121212123,28.96969696969697,8.575989854853784,2.067733333333333,616,23,120,10,11,195,113,150,0.073,0.774,0.152,0.8736,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,6,0,0,0,10,4,1,0,10,1,15,4,2,2,2,24,23,11,0,2,3,4,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,4,12,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,4,1,19,3,18,15,3,16,0,0,0,0,20,11,0,2,4,86,23,0,0.0,0.1689077470831793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400346523402625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967976693451913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13393779760204114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280096924996962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603583992462845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415811881102656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14896119088250911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515323336857839,0.0,0.0,0.2866605758871896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14879336305083074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834606896347429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577506544948868,0.10069282900727887,0.0,0.0,0.12588119785116314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873295759894191,0.15123135605034818,0.0,0.3339240739111604,0.0,0.0,0.10479642642959412,0.0,0.10994940628086408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959048813510162,0.0,0.0,0.10842167272107103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564857156003542,0.2695265037169612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174362934884204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718576550560638,0.0,0.0,0.13124811974181078,0.0,0.0,0.09470910445079482,0.0,0.1400623688487712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3429590940451261,0.0,0.0,0.23525032067928306,0.08408431649592289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447744217964286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18360516950767555
mentalhealth,CurleeQu,2020/02/10,"Job anxiety So, I dont have a ""formal diagnosis"" from a psychiatrist but I tested in the moderate-severe range of anxiety with my family doctor and I'm on meds for it. I had an interview for a job that is related to the field that I went for, possibly full time with benefits etc etc

I have to call tomorrow since they had called me on Friday to connect about the interview, and I'm terrified of having to call back tomorrow. 

Its...conflicting? I applied to this job but now I'm very afraid that I've gotten it as weird as that sounds. It's like my brain doesnt want me to get it, and honestly I am hoping that I'm not offered the job/I might reject the offer. 

I dont....have any real reason to, other that I am dreading horribly to make that call tomorrow and have to decide on things like that. Plus, if I'm honest with myself, as much as I want a full time job (or maybe dont?), i worry about my ability to fully perform 40 hours a week.",2.726461538461539,3.965154364102567,5.092307692307692,81.70769230769233,74.58974358974359,9.0974358974359,24.794871794871803,9.558583805096642,2.1480871794871788,731,23,153,19,15,258,106,195,0.15,0.727,0.12300000000000001,-0.5538,5,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,1,5,10,0,2,11,0,13,2,1,2,0,21,25,14,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,15,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,4,2,18,6,30,20,5,16,0,1,0,0,9,6,0,4,11,104,33,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387033027786027,0.0,0.16619926724329134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835277352238542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12126405978427073,0.4436827222325936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111184706628307,0.0,0.0,0.38193137323466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422964430888955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240420809559844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056753312545181386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789147947671124,0.10697606898983816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5389794701699449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613968293190076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250960678326815,0.0,0.10913078434895253,0.0,0.12066050947004353,0.0,0.0,0.1152364634802985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985360895064135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246102764652235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364171805068455,0.0,0.1116870186775172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271799806024293,0.0,0.08985767530851985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216719165476708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266829751832904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962894896829929,0.12814246357643466,0.0,0.08713431646505447,0.0,0.0,0.10069865167477024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031635770475567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Miranda135790,2020/02/10,"Please help me I have so many mental health problems: PTSD, Depression, Major Anxiety, BPD, and ADHD. Due to this amount of diagnosises, doctors and psychologists refuse to believe that my mental health is true. They all think my trauma is made up since it's so severe for my age. I've tried so many therapists and medication and nothing helps. Even hospitalized care refused to help me. I experience constant and major emotion shifts, I struggle everyday. I'm so exhausted of living like this. Please help me. I have no support from family and I have no friends.

What do I do Reddit?",4.049974271012012,6.922503877358494,5.088936535162952,75.74088336192114,76.26415094339623,8.00548885077187,28.504288164665518,8.841846274778883,2.816011320754717,465,20,77,11,11,152,71,106,0.23199999999999998,0.565,0.203,-0.4198,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,5,10,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,1,2,13,12,10,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,5,0,0,0,5,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,13,5,8,11,4,5,0,1,0,0,8,1,0,0,5,47,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16925228274641024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773583134952804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15866904974990936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773725406577189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358725920682594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15218898874920458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129809893069955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14414716744110734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15841665755191706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301798055810112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13776038302197405,0.13276355155909628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088061880601226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993949294377214,0.0,0.0,0.3775859615910405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880323342884782,0.0,0.12435693238360185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332583180528144,0.0,0.2855623895172817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187307715559022,0.2838503705324807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513177216109445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091817346212674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13475687503979888,0.16462466943395976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909968511733869,0.0,0.1164974011386938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14722782465836773,0.0,0.0,0.15981409427254015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351640718871366,0.0,0.09023923861729413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561544997597532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,okxyhannah,2020/02/10,"i feel stuck ??? like, i don’t know how else to put it.

i just feel stuck, like when a mouse gets stuck in a glue trap. (i know that’s a bad comparison),
i feel like i’m in a loop where i do the same stuff every day and nothing seems to make me feel happy anymore.

i am seeing a therapist but i’m afraid she’s gonna ship me off to some psych ward like my mom did.
my mom is the main source of my anxiety, depression, whatever you wanna call it and i’ve cut all contact off with her.

my dad really isn’t working right now (atm) because of something he said (really don’t wanna say what it is) and now he’s paying for it + he was getting disability but almost all of it is going to my mom.

i feel like i’m tired all the time and there’s nothing i can do except sulk and sleep,
i lost my three furry best friends, i lost the two people i held close to me, and i just feel like i’m nothing.

and to top the icing on this shit cake, i have to move out of my childhood home in a few months.",0.2673394495412857,1.7675554128440396,2.6261376146789,95.64856422018349,82.02752293577981,5.827889908256882,18.69816513761468,6.742157984588678,-0.15100623853210982,752,17,188,8,20,258,120,218,0.159,0.721,0.12,-0.7847,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,5,8,16,2,1,11,0,13,3,2,2,3,35,39,11,0,2,5,4,6,6,1,1,1,2,1,0,9,10,0,1,9,0,2,3,3,7,0,2,9,9,27,9,23,29,8,21,0,3,1,0,15,11,1,3,13,110,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112644535091609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605610764096244,0.0,0.11156188257804912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392616000181883,0.06857410741124627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180534625566028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486695680490284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254806373470023,0.0,0.09688923478354093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939726701568456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477940088840194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3412761522011204,0.2410930214133326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691107604977638,0.0,0.11754490267926145,0.0,0.06393182238592257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974987524241315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283869464458515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236453736312822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.329747590258427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455967144648044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508931453001526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952479757070607,0.0897900782511251,0.11956124269348953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238174575294656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798782094880698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130855772083977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14413057097708576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606759303446212,0.10700569660704076,0.08945819044859267,0.0,0.0,0.08964159663773981,0.10240853419535846,0.0,0.0,0.11547146914151815,0.0,0.0,0.11257328687497453,0.0,0.0,0.08660187323240379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877647971537276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061193626884313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06559501693044116,0.12929305916224015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988838366202436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818955495998596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emudoctor11119999,2020/02/10,"Probably just venting This is probably common but, every little mistake I make be it conversation attempts, making the wrong decision in any little situation I think too hard over. I try to brush it off with a I don’t need to worry about it, but then I just dwell over it. I don’t want to, but when I think about the things I accidentally did or said I just think if I was dead I wouldn’t have to think about it or feel this way, I think I’m just ashamed of my mistakes even if they’re meaningless, I don’t know if it’s just depression I’ve never really thought about it. I just don’t really know how to cheer myself up instead of immediately going to I hate myself or I want to die to forget. I think this post is just me venting but if anyone knows how to deal with this I’d like to hear how you feel about it.",2.23843853820598,3.6694443720930248,4.157242524916942,87.13941860465117,76.20930232558139,7.4724252491694365,22.169435215946844,8.192908349453996,0.979927242524918,640,17,143,11,14,218,89,172,0.267,0.6679999999999999,0.065,-0.9918,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,1,0,1,19,9,1,2,3,0,11,0,0,5,1,46,33,16,2,10,18,0,3,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,13,2,0,0,13,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,4,6,22,2,24,27,0,14,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,7,5,100,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096937338440237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967268091313376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14696044108732315,0.12277614320817146,0.0,0.14794202900092648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415142531179377,0.0,0.1201026029636463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14415282162078524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101315484996288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769475877776645,0.1407363627280194,0.0,0.0,0.16066164160421695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23502149852711485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696416161103371,0.2857405301162666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19030342131893252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569732889563514,0.10994159021278753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13652131287521022,0.0,0.3073811058859717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263944041350064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13559552575750095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602296109038446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470237178317163,0.5480329426994439,0.0,0.11316696772807633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096780545471459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681566782434914,0.1131477458685679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447641300925006,0.0,0.0,0.15585355538225035,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dismal-Stuff,2020/02/10,"Grieving and depressed I (19 F) recently had a fairly bad relapse after one the worst depressive episodes (BPD type 2) I've experienced. A day later, I received news that someone I've been very close to my entire life had died, due to cancer. Since then, I haven't had the energy to get out of bed, or eat, or really take care of myself at all. 

Any tips on feeling a little better, or maybe easy self care?",4.9866666666666655,5.238907913580249,6.169975308641978,79.6808888888889,68.62962962962963,8.949135802469135,28.54567901234568,8.841846274778883,2.126356049382716,315,10,62,5,5,106,65,81,0.267,0.593,0.14,-0.9279999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,5,0,5,3,0,0,1,9,10,5,2,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,4,2,5,3,9,6,2,12,0,3,0,0,2,5,0,3,6,33,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559398840690474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17876289531459635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893522911899976,0.0,0.0,0.26964894850421817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4365743797788725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380755044434026,0.0,0.36880460426330797,0.0,0.22219993247013056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190757136661617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082543866872228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185737355817768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512237559617875,0.0,0.21458245139863574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21509022758626886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450783523498089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13715666737951834,0.0,0.21139595571467326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22335091727662984,0.0,0.0,0.17710408614568066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814045489408469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16097505855382693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17665328025377294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,neptunem,2020/02/10,"Suicidal from constant job application rejections Okay so for some context, I am a disabled man who’s visibly gay and trans. My disability limits me from MOST jobs off the bat. I also have z e r o experience. 

I have really bad anger. I get so angry that no one hires me because I don’t have any experience and I dont have any experience because no one will hire me, so on and so forth. When I get angry, I get unreasonably suicidal and wanting to hurt myself badly

I have applied to. F I F T Y jobs in the past two months alone. I’ve been job searching for 5 months now. And nothing. Not a single damn thing. I KNOW there’s nothing wrong with me, most of the people I contact me tell me that I don’t have enough experience. And these aren’t hard jobs, they’re pretty easy jobs that most young adults get. 

I won’t go into detail about everything but the gist is, all this overwhelming amount of job rejections and not having enough money to live properly, and literally needing to get my apartment furniture from the garbage is making me extremely depressed and suicidal and angry. I’m crying almost every night   

I don’t want advice, I’m just complaining",2.5315226968013778,4.95389171365639,4.373667879716528,81.28435165677074,79.0,7.648266615590884,25.28806742003448,8.587818076936951,2.0729446083125835,917,35,173,21,23,310,134,227,0.243,0.7190000000000001,0.038,-0.9926,9,1,0,0,0,2,21.0,0,0,0,1,10,12,2,1,7,1,18,1,0,1,1,28,31,17,3,3,4,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,7,12,0,1,1,0,1,1,10,11,0,3,1,1,25,1,17,28,9,14,0,5,0,1,6,5,1,5,8,109,32,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843116319863956,0.0,0.0,0.0906181793530234,0.09372605441563434,0.0,0.07236922516433626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308009751664307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511199385938007,0.11033044362626512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779349518096042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940506634996528,0.0,0.0,0.07794364855651244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606006156456432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870121017653084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624636864711153,0.0,0.08133152753207509,0.3540878867494832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364008396936526,0.0,0.05143068274569783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106620016404321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687731313636044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6286197969999774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04973396461168294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990919164208159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060406454392507664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14446530243948896,0.0,0.0,0.06710127262130172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492390405543425,0.0,0.1736657614751343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264419671548442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638820229970062,0.06273819089708242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09206646550070208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0579737397843286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969621936691256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790970628652376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060121194483363075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884009619410373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675319071733888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894263192809404,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brainhealthuk,2020/02/10,"“Dan, you have produced a mental health storytelling masterpiece. Your work is some of the most informative and interesting that I have ever read on mental health. Your bravery gives me strength and hope.” Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Visit my website today and see for yourself. 

I am quite new to this platform so I’m just getting used to it and how you communicate effectively. I’m trying to get a viral hit in the UK in order to improve mental health services. I’ve put together a 15 point plan of how I would do that and I’ve created a video which is pinned to the top of my Facebook page for people to watch and understand how I would change services for the better. I need to get mass public are buy-in for my plans and ideas in order to create sweeping change in mental health. 

- My Facebook page is www.facebook.com/danfoster.org.uk

- My Facebook revolution recruitment page is @DanFosterUniverse 

- My Twitter handle is DanF0ster_BHUK

- My Instagram is brainhealthuk 

Through conscious writing and spontaneous narration; I have delivered a body of work that I Hope connects with people in a way that mental health storytelling has not done before. I hope that people are able to “put themselves in my shoes”. 

This is a new style of talking and writing about mental health in the United Kingdom because I wanted to answer the question “how do we talk about mental health? “

Well through conscious writing and spontaneous narration I hope that I am delivering on that. I am writing with my heart not my head because I wanted to reflect how it truly felt to have a mental health condition and to live with it in this country. 

I’m afraid it’s not been a very good time for me and people have treated me very badly. 

Bigotry is rife in the UK and the levels of bigotry are far higher and graver than racism today - in my opinion.

Did you know that millions of pounds are being spent on trying to stop people being bigots?That is a ridiculous waste of tax payers money and I believe that if I do get a viral hit and I get the attention of a lot of people - then I could stop lots of bigotry within the space of about 10 minutes. Because I would given no holds barred statement about what it feels like to be a victim of bigots. And hopefully I’ll be able to put the bigots “in my shoes” so that they can see it and feel it for themselves - and understand how bad it is and how bad it makes you feel. 

And if I can do that then I can hopefully convince millions of people to stop being bigots or to at least realise that they are bigots and get some help with it and educate themselves better. In my opinion the majority of the United Kingdom are mental health bigots. 

That must change. 

We have come on in leaps and bounds on so many different topics and issues - same sex marriage, combatting lots of racism etc. - within this country and yet mental health always seems to take a back seat. 

I think it’s time for us to have a proper normal adult conversation about mental health and stop avoiding the subject. At the end of the day it affects one in four of us. It’s going to affect all of us at some point in our lives whether or not we get it directly… It could be that a loved one gets it. So we need to be more understanding and more sympathetic to those that suffer with it. 

Please do take a good 15 minutes to have a look through my website and all of the content that I’ve been trying to create a viral hit with. It’s been a real labour of love to bring this website together. Because it is an amalgamation of two Facebook pages - one of which has been taken down and I’m hoping that will be reinstated because it has gone to appeal with Facebook. 

If you like me and you like my work then please do support me and follow me on this journey. There is no reason why I cannot pull this off. And I know that people are always questioning my mental health but it should not be impossible to get a viral hit in the UK on this subject. And I’m determined to do it. 

I really hope it soon though because I’m running out of time and money and I can only volunteer my time for so long. If you get this message please do have a look at my website and please do consider becoming my friend on following me on Facebook. Any suggestions that you might have about getting a viral hit - I would be so grateful to hear them. 

I am a sufferer of psychosis and on occasions I may come out with some bonkers statements. 

But I hope you can forgive this and understand that I can’t help it. 

I’m told that I will get better and I hope that I will because it’s quite annoying to have psychosis. It doesn’t happen very often. But when it does, it causes me problems sometimes. 

But on the whole I’m a very intuitive, decent, honourable, trustworthy, honest, emotionally mature and emotionally-well-developed youngish man who is just trying to make a difference in the world and is a warrior for mental health. 

❤️ Please do give me your time and help me make this viral hit - a reality! 

And become part of a group that went on to improve mental health services in the UK - something to be incredibly proud about. 

It’s time for change. Join my revolution.

Big Kiss,

Dan x 

[Dan Foster Universe](www.danfosteruniverse.com)",5.93130924022066,6.733435491474428,6.191185901454363,78.42119710694585,66.70310932798395,8.718712387161485,30.92416311434303,8.751876143730069,2.443794897191576,4143,153,756,62,64,1327,352,997,0.049,0.8079999999999999,0.14300000000000002,0.9982,1,1,1,0,0,0,87.0,8,13,3,16,31,43,3,2,51,0,88,24,5,17,4,175,169,74,0,28,19,0,4,3,1,11,14,1,1,2,69,61,1,7,27,3,4,15,10,11,1,7,13,10,87,32,130,126,22,93,0,2,5,4,54,50,0,33,28,539,156,11,0.06661279636276073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554271828136747,0.0,0.0,0.02264949288839824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025610564320215416,0.08342835381681347,0.14212289834790745,0.07356860008105387,0.028341291720214882,0.03752490527328084,0.0,0.08837040772707558,0.0,0.036995899989516336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034214845601903465,0.1409350120204143,0.05738102576643433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05318489756309234,0.0,0.0,0.02147987145741612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959619438809736,0.0,0.0,0.029146653496382537,0.03408400907400925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0374652150354159,0.02949958292597335,0.0,0.037145438120986085,0.0,0.03012754398234035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05052214699739385,0.023794097515711158,0.03197936539483965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025732440614841548,0.0,0.20881462054657468,0.06390106409493311,0.01892879363272575,0.05587165316636654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029452737915725488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03418197343020421,0.4956440130517805,0.03753873138570362,0.039468242208990575,0.06697372989671169,0.0,0.0,0.3308076852959374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03759886947805822,0.0,0.03476322642745041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03660865080584917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04881547134080104,0.0,0.05882031959132113,0.02947511429929353,0.05593797208325523,0.0,0.0,0.08494772605721833,0.06012064945460033,0.0,0.06669683824347546,0.03376746011001382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4699102186572566,0.03533282510398419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04939254445530916,0.0,0.06433505381776165,0.0,0.0,0.03263319859983373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06770783215218992,0.025331016660722436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03606758354562602,0.0,0.1847237026587232,0.0,0.0,0.1828021173974785,0.0629706237213748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03186972493225438,0.0,0.10044638838357796,0.07462157698091089,0.07085090846297315,0.033315411365743154,0.03790997282893747,0.021336931534059668,0.034244524503242835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530817743133018,0.030320894003495795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02564089252341733,0.03294087944378148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138256096568556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037795705957555034,0.0,0.0,0.05008453280000238,0.05354084246850721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021341395101213703,0.032723367107386075,0.0,0.11652737173513199,0.0,0.06314114212205825,0.03182569077664624,0.0,0.0904514323030449,0.0,0.032535511414269754,0.1386925404801453,0.12019048831066875,0.028766034244200957,0.0,0.10992506651133957,0.03928995317279847,0.02643706859115364,0.0,0.0,0.05989290380536124,0.030875364796664136,0.030053843879854443,0.037185404129460434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727423636599982,0.0,0.0,0.09463963864321873,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,2ne1pao,2020/02/10,"I want to admit myself into a psychiatric hospital ? So I'm diagnosed with Harm OCD, depression and generalized anxiety. Harm ocd has taken a huge toll on my life and some days I cant function properly. I've been having suicidal thoughts lately and want to hurt myself but also not at the same time ? I want to admit myself into a psychiatric hospital but I'm not sure.",4.056384976525823,6.1292293098591575,6.309507042253525,70.9030399061033,72.80281690140845,10.367136150234742,28.734741784037556,10.504223727775694,3.7642375586854464,295,12,49,10,6,104,47,71,0.21899999999999997,0.6579999999999999,0.12300000000000001,-0.8382,0,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,0,4,2,0,0,1,20,13,7,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,7,1,8,10,2,8,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,1,3,34,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22604310995077334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162341359614651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822923242450146,0.0,0.24345465466316316,0.28689396283842017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30259338959745324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188528060118349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19965112614623734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091841762035474,0.0,0.26640371672788843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22440047657143275,0.16482132643633693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5001605966925643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,30_03,2020/02/10,"Am I an attention whore ?  

Today my father gave me a camera to train my small brother with, told me to delete the files and factory reset so he can have as much space as possible. I as foolish and stupid as I am usually decided to check on the files and found a video so I decided to start with it and it was just my small casually going around the house saying cheese and forgetting that he just has the camera pointed at his belly and feet. This already overloaded me with guilt and a surge of cuteness but then I stumbled upon some pictures and they were of my dad playing around with small brother, like just silly poses and them taking pictures of each other and I almost had a full on breakdown because I felt like I missed out on that experience.

For context my dad used to work from morning till midnight so our interactions were already cut in half, he hanged around the house during the weekend but usually napped or caused a family fight(there was a 3 year period where the family ties were really fragile and I was around 8 or 9 when this started) and was always the judgmental type(still is). Not saying he never did right by me because he treated like an adult(I used to tell him that I don't want him to do that and I still don't want him to do that) and also gave me gifts around every birthday or two but he also had unnatural exceptions which if unfulfilled he wouldn't talk to me or outright ignore me. 

I'm not trying to act like the victim or anything I am just laying out my case and I want to know if I am in the wrong or if I am rightful to feel this way.

\[Sorry for the bad grammar or spelling, it’s just English is my second language.\]",5.674272727272728,5.943249245454549,6.328030303030308,79.0820454545455,67.15151515151516,9.145454545454548,31.34848484848485,8.982922981607832,2.5439212121212127,1321,49,252,21,20,433,174,330,0.107,0.833,0.059000000000000004,-0.9331,0,0,0,0,1,0,22.0,1,0,2,1,18,18,3,1,19,0,25,2,1,3,1,67,43,40,0,7,21,5,3,4,0,1,0,2,0,0,13,27,0,1,7,5,1,3,6,9,0,3,15,5,36,9,43,27,4,40,0,1,0,1,27,23,0,12,17,188,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043729371793244,0.0,0.2434106442583556,0.17639421653964926,0.09176827880266834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907574565651884,0.4908975909981149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920857004867791,0.13446082999875564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132959436506336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292222233248687,0.0,0.0,0.1078826241878418,0.20793903188275129,0.0,0.055764821952095575,0.0,0.10589357677987622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092487256122213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06267909438318381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545146113536278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060611286794678185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21552417936378007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107421778038175,0.0,0.08506074504007276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042576126134152,0.12433291563766903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065318431908299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18837034535396646,0.0,0.17541055934957475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234581549439349,0.15612453516200409,0.0,0.08807597400788314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292269490121122,0.08864515043993032,0.09639639227184016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453993221438623,0.10538471255509056,0.0,0.07487817201164547,0.0,0.10773514838338427,0.0,0.0,0.1905064855591151,0.2429328454425913,0.0,0.19515179342737252,0.08754131666239773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029082687407636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058238845099499,0.0,0.07102172280783776
mentalhealth,rachelwhte,2020/02/10,"Relapsing I’ve had breakdowns the past few weeks, and I’m finally realizing I might be relapsing. I’m feeling so hopeless and worthless. I almost ruined the most important relationship in my life because of this. I just need to vent and know that maybe there’s someone out there who understands how terrifying relapsing into depression and anxiety is. I feel like my life is falling apart in front of me and I can’t grab all the pieces to put it back together. I’m just sad and hurting.",5.116405529953916,6.819308720430112,6.212933947772663,74.18225806451615,69.3225806451613,10.475576036866359,34.79109062980031,10.608840637214634,4.171102611367127,393,20,70,12,7,131,66,93,0.257,0.6829999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.965,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,3,0,6,2,0,1,1,21,14,8,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,5,0,0,3,1,6,0,0,1,3,8,1,8,11,4,12,0,6,0,0,2,5,0,3,5,46,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23660011604297476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807534208161967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816846021666272,0.0,0.1440339893795067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20350746864424174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238940359742612,0.16879835551470398,0.0,0.2588330010507349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25294244150171985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298532135870901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337828586617754,0.1154343884453074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23737484424106636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25065555729958194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17519849772066268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255558303508467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375264869133164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25367610878336155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20019913053550276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459756326095872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18952942492200292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,livinginthechaos,2020/02/10,"I want peace I want more than anything to let things be, but for some reason I can’t. All I crave is that inner peace most people have but why can’t I find it? Why am I like this. I want more than anything to be mentally healthy.",0.2434000000000012,2.05514054,1.7620000000000005,100.241,83.6,4.800000000000002,18.0,5.6839178017228535,-0.6559999999999997,177,4,44,1,5,57,32,50,0.0,0.66,0.34,0.9387,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,1,1,10,11,2,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,5,8,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,31,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4365870585586825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424507766531956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712552077385221,0.0,0.12959688255631227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26732844737235795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839039090063577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727403934662506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17623273035971632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4693870382083209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4787274651273696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sirchairington,2020/02/10,"You can't love someone until you love yourself I think this is true in every aspect, so the question is... How do I love myself? I got issues like anyone else and don't want them and the stresses of life to stop me from being happy?",2.3306250000000013,3.905527479166668,3.84,88.905,76.29166666666666,4.800000000000002,20.333333333333336,3.1291,-0.24026666666666685,181,4,36,0,4,60,38,48,0.282,0.568,0.15,-0.7837,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,1,0,2,7,0,1,2,0,6,4,0,1,1,8,12,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,8,6,5,10,0,3,0,0,0,3,7,1,0,1,3,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620416837241974,0.2374504193055524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935934392808815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19525538819256927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18534786571972175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466971531503987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24188185644114754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16368854034350466,0.11321903482889285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6274774723891788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25960774395290376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19635701837284328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19374942568819872,0.2654634280495251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148493013929495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366893667472978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TA2002howto,2020/02/10,"I'm tired of feeling like this (Throw away)
18 and not liking life.
How do I stop this constant depressed mood, or decide that life is worth living or something like that.

For lack of a better term, how do I nurture myself back to life?

No, I will not see a therapist or use prescription drugs.",2.9663793103448266,4.8638421896551725,3.5822758620689648,90.04031034482759,75.3793103448276,6.019310344827588,23.66896551724138,6.742157984588678,0.7036579310344826,229,7,46,2,5,72,43,58,0.22,0.581,0.19899999999999998,-0.3523,0,0,2,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,2,0,4,5,0,3,0,13,8,6,0,1,5,0,1,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,2,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,0,2,4,5,5,7,2,6,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,3,7,30,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153376886343254,0.17623798739515664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027057091021856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476800299843422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19740663912096854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26579521466836065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158886543117513,0.16373804987744836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4856648709030664,0.3359215484392091,0.0,0.2023847388347424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263996363711413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644668960986726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916185653903784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661148416077124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634276999700502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19795221679424088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Odd_Bunsen,2020/02/10,"I feel wrong I do not usually experience symptoms of depression, but from my experience I may have a more difficult time when I haven't had hugs for a day or two. Sometimes I experience outbursts in reaction to my parents getting angry at a little thing, and since signing up for next year's high School classes I've found myself constantly thinking about what I want to do and how I can achieve that. I've also found it difficult to connect with people at school and, though I have a few friends that are very nice when I talk to, no one has initiated a conversation with me for a long time. I also find it extremely difficult to focus on a task outside of school because I become interested in the subject more deeply than a worksheet or find something related that doesn't have anything to do with what I need to do. I think I might have some type of stress or anxiety disorder but I have no idea what kind.",10.574117174959873,7.116614084269664,10.30354735152488,66.48230337078652,59.84269662921348,13.991653290529694,44.52969502407704,12.031772070788634,5.1669380417335455,729,34,138,17,7,241,107,178,0.20199999999999999,0.703,0.095,-0.9605,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,7,11,0,1,9,0,17,2,0,1,0,27,25,14,0,2,6,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,8,0,0,0,5,6,0,2,3,1,19,5,25,20,4,18,0,1,0,1,4,8,0,6,10,102,28,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20493817547149387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802251727170147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544374936874587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810958236868758,0.14151445285049324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846783926355288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263613153563287,0.0,0.11036202949865796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468532013344992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760202902315141,0.0,0.0,0.06478863701172627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342251647318685,0.0,0.0,0.2809856608450577,0.098996372096386,0.0,0.0669449709551697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353811004726367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14464821774839728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343233051956696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284243990307832,0.0,0.11339497199008065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593042158593885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501008440810077,0.0,0.0,0.13627246033175652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682723163735312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227816298020216,0.0,0.0,0.08883230645093697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3890367670518387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599415600347503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864417352109353,0.1267282652045815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14677760012964322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133180774024361,0.0,0.10298963170071936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512684692014053,0.16420678645438708,0.12589146419873626,0.0,0.1494324773978311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516875653277773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14112201375919914,0.1057243553959676,0.07557702905375753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009492583101324,0.0,0.08251439631417179
mentalhealth,WaitWhoAmIRightNow,2020/02/10,"New support Instagram! Hey guys, I came across a new Instagram account (it’s just starting up, my friend told me about it) that is going to be spreading awareness about mental health! It looks like the creators are trying to create a safe, supportive place for people, and I just wanted to share ❤️

Hope everyone is doing okay today ❤️

[insta account](https://www.instagram.com/p/B8U_HQGHPX4/?igshid=b6qw6wnwnxc)",6.312571428571428,9.631748542857146,5.504285714285714,73.41071428571429,70.71428571428572,7.428571428571428,28.57142857142857,8.418075326091056,2.6220000000000008,338,13,48,6,7,102,57,70,0.0,0.6829999999999999,0.317,0.9647,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,3,1,5,1,0,0,0,7,14,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,8,8,11,0,9,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,1,5,27,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24511263869405406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047816300631624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655747607048822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179686035544605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21219980728580096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278006641061346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128573972133039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470065272766248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17996575763317654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21597327327990706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4139623326155764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485750191851081,0.0,0.22390750656456224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516891588360856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4863910938929645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20314006848349486,0.2047816300631624,0.0,0.14550188304284495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640512208041466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tayj_23,2020/02/10,Can you be raped and it not effect your mental health? I was wondering if you can be raped and it not change your mental health? Or would that just be suppressing it?,2.7672727272727258,4.850669969696972,3.003030303030304,93.12454545454548,76.57575757575758,6.824242424242425,17.060606060606062,7.793537801064563,0.1484424242424245,131,2,28,2,3,40,21,33,0.245,0.755,0.0,-0.8943,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,4,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,0,11,8,4,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135664895448592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6301480012810488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.597430771422383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32144811395022754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210563853762964,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,koraat,2020/02/10,"How do I get an antidepressant prescription with no health insurance... I started seeing a therapist recently. She was really confused as to why I have never taken an antidepressant before and recommended I get on one. As far as I can remember I've had bouts of depression (literally as a child)... I come from a really neglectful/abusive home so my parents never tried to help and a lot of my behaviors were vilified instead of treated. So this is why it's taken so long to actually try seeking help in the form of medication.

The only problem is I quit my job recently and have no health insurance. I have a part time one now. I guess I could try to get a full time job with insurance but I feel like shit and I don't know how long that'll take me. I've been feeling like utter garbage for a while now and I just want to feel better as soon as I can. I'm sick of trying to pretend I'm just being lazy or melodramatic and need to pull myself up by my bootstraps and ""get over it"". It hasn't worked in the past two decades of my life so I don't think it'll magically get better now.

I'm going to see about trying out that lemonaid website tomorrow. Is it even worth it? Will they just tell me I need to go to a doctor in real life? I really don't have the funds it could potentially cost for me to visit my primary doctor to get diagnosed and prescribed and then follow ups... on top of paying for the medication by myself. What are some resources I can seek out? Anytime I try to google stuff it's just teledoctors and I tried one who told me I need to go visit a doctor in person and that they only refill prescriptions.",3.4459878419452887,4.791194717325233,5.395287537993924,79.82045714285717,72.95136778115501,8.911416413373859,26.837811550151976,9.3871,2.3193641580547117,1278,45,256,30,25,442,163,329,0.086,0.84,0.07400000000000001,-0.43,3,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,2,5,17,9,1,1,16,0,26,12,1,2,2,44,57,27,0,7,6,1,3,2,0,3,11,0,1,2,15,16,0,0,6,1,4,8,8,4,0,4,7,5,36,5,47,44,5,39,0,1,2,0,13,14,1,5,19,182,51,7,0.0,0.10376925554938098,0.08546649797999739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07452504635567479,0.0,0.0,0.15491669180890474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754433433626727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985272779518956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543345377193679,0.0888929501601115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26892883204385665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05784647573411041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328508729996745,0.12513587862228714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745449895086527,0.0,0.14932303405878702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648043091457616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618917994910725,0.0,0.0,0.11740750032233742,0.0,0.08785096172112561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17382141100032333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048132269786042334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237222103270477,0.08557538121318742,0.0,0.0,0.1550129952564497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445830021581623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17645744329781995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948207778333789,0.13509585243882402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780416143201092,0.13321871208362812,0.0,0.0,0.09724842211291228,0.09484177228794896,0.08360604854018873,0.0,0.07647241876911548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838032631457228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315325655708524,0.0,0.09968644020568007,0.1683200427871959,0.0,0.1729514964687623,0.0,0.09921228796912436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958155931610766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990071754539253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061990337477027736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025938022138764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585007072843099,0.0,0.07654972208306192,0.0,0.0,0.10168838136259724,0.0,0.05611841813400111,0.0,0.0,0.10213846127170356,0.0,0.0,0.08368747281688647,0.0,0.4162326188505625,0.0,0.08555398675158395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05165758869463585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805660027237345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637600675520847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OrbitingSun,2020/02/10,"What is wrong with me? 16, male.

A couple months ago I noticed my memory is worsening. Last year, mid May, I used to like someone, apparently I talked about her with an online friend and seemed to be pretty obsessive about her.

According to this friend of mine, I also was very insecure about myself and sent various photos of myself trying to feel better, I also vent about my family and shared more details than I should have.

I don't remember any of this. I have a vague, very vague memory of telling him some of these things, and the others seem like things I'd say. And he told me about the very personal things I told him, they are all true but I don't remember telling him about this.

My memory was something I was very proud of when I was young. And recently I have noticed things changing where I lived. Trees are gone, new ones appeared, one of my cat's coloring is different than I remember it to be.

In the last couple months I had some breakdowns when I realized I was mostly alone. I sometimes would hurt myself until I realized it wasn't worth it.

I am somewhat of a loner. Spend most days without talking to anyone other than my family unless I go to school or somewhere else (I usually don't text people). I used to be a very empathetic person and trust most people, in fact, I overshared personal problems quite easily.

Currently I can't feel comfortable telling anyone I know personally (the fake anonymity makes me feel safe) about anything I am sharing in this post. I also realized I don't care about others nearly as much as before, still I still force myself to look like I care more than I do.

Other times I'd just act weird. Like exit my house at night and walk around (I live in a rural area so it's relationship safe to do so), or feel very tempted to do so.  Or just talk to myself in the 3rd person, once or twice talking imagining someone (specific or not) is listening. 

Lately I have been feeling happy during the day but I also feel doomed when alone. The later is not a recent thing. I wouldn't say I have depression too.

I also feel very pressured and paranoic when alone in a crowded place. I don't feel scared of anything specific, I just feel alert and my heart beats fast all the time.  I do not have social anxiety (I think), I don't have troubles taking in public or taking to a stranger. 

Sometimes I would start scratching of pinching myself for seemingly no reason. Or my heart would rush for no reason.",4.489466546112116,5.9184324493670895,5.300575045207957,81.18140506329114,70.49789029535864,8.45511754068716,27.04496684749849,8.922882184376627,2.1197665581675698,1927,64,361,36,35,627,220,474,0.12300000000000001,0.7390000000000001,0.138,0.8447,3,3,1,0,0,2,57.0,0,0,1,4,28,30,0,4,17,0,44,2,2,5,4,76,74,35,0,6,17,0,10,4,2,6,0,3,0,6,19,13,0,2,23,0,2,7,15,12,0,3,12,15,69,18,54,53,12,51,1,3,2,0,34,15,0,18,32,261,88,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05478499552644403,0.0,0.0,0.19202908696872867,0.0,0.2471208303032205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04202843933045604,0.0,0.04727944083793023,0.0,0.0,0.08642876501595237,0.0,0.1017178837835946,0.05501813955631003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05259015137685249,0.0,0.0,0.05466009530640927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602539455466724,0.0,0.065379814808913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676859919971748,0.0,0.07971617544129933,0.0,0.05323118799298652,0.0,0.0,0.0645714111102474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05162882009025553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652551250117198,0.0,0.28124695776460445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549832524148083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0351243031670365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579088105512043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647468103005404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131283929354054,0.06616183054451266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033965538807970465,0.1007560587622271,0.06971694043964978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077610071263499,0.0,0.10914708976147423,0.0,0.05189930029678684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04125425726543919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986617872660204,0.0,0.045432618840014274,0.0,0.0,0.05969012020543826,0.0,0.05799831526484861,0.0,0.0,0.14072718785263627,0.0,0.06581861648607458,0.08375918259558167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856934078871378,0.26982177642856314,0.0645714111102474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05919058443127553,0.06287628849404436,0.0,0.059137518327382725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573553594590759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12708840127913693,0.12204682620036755,0.06635373495595047,0.2100336530287645,0.0,0.0,0.09829710728792686,0.06187599687053625,0.06254835223429195,0.0,0.1687905146949935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630007952086908,0.10473166046006273,0.047579285819295,0.12225030909226192,0.0,0.04374477294868289,0.0,0.09871256894276056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293694823769623,0.19870096522485944,0.16205671793846532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052972028622983,0.039601130747527455,0.0,0.0,0.07207613282173636,0.0,0.0,0.11811161693966953,0.0,0.04196045970689962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067566087212048,0.06806772654045938,0.3569600109892828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059576283482931675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171011147705078,0.06757232870445586,0.0,0.03979937087312158
mentalhealth,scrappychemist,2020/02/10,Needing a hug roommate's girlfriend keeps stealing food. Yeah I hate this bitch and I don't know what to do.,-0.054090909090909634,2.0718285909090923,0.5004545454545449,101.2706818181818,104.0,2.2,23.681818181818183,3.1291,-0.27267272727272696,87,4,18,0,4,26,20,22,0.39299999999999996,0.42100000000000004,0.18600000000000005,-0.7845,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5987329580827815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48885453157941794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4401088457645536,0.0,0.0,0.2721194966875743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3671447606353708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anxiousbeech69,2020/02/10,"Why is living so difficult? I (20F) am a part-time college student taking 3 credit hours online. I took time off college last semester, so compared to taking no classes, that’s an improvement but I find myself struggling to even catch up with the workload now. And it’s so fucking stupid bc I was capable of doing 18 credit hours a year or so ago. I feel pathetic, miserable, and incapable. 

I’m also realizing that I don’t have friends. I mean I have “friends” where I talk to them about good things that happened, but when it comes to personal things like my struggles and stuff, I can’t speak to them without fearing that they will judge me. And when I decide to be brave and tell them, they just judge me or dismiss me. I make different personalities based off of people I meet because I’m too insecure of who I actually am. I just feel so lonely and alone and I don’t know how to make friends, like actual friends. 

I’ve been dealing with suicidal thoughts all day and have been experiencing existential crisis and breaking down. Sleeping is really my only escape because I don’t have to face my problems. I don’t have to think of how much I’m a burden I am and how I’m not worth living. I feel everyone else has a reason to keep going, like my friend is counting down days til his wedding, but I don’t. I don’t have anything to look forward to and I just repeat just trying to survive another day. Is it even worth it? I have so many issues mental health wise and I just don’t want to deal with all this anymore. 

And I dont want to go to the ER because 1) As much as I want to just end it all, I don’t have a plan of killing myself because I’m too weak and 2) it’s too expensive and my parents are going to guilt trip me. They’re just going to trap me in a ward for a week and I won’t be able to do anything except drown on my anxieties and thoughts of wanting to die. 

Sorry, any advice will be useful but I just kind of wanted/needed to vent. I’m just lost and don’t know what to do.",2.434328443241704,3.973045975786928,4.1759243697479,86.75851979774961,75.92493946731236,6.989574134738644,25.94851160803305,7.724431198458867,1.371872012533827,1560,57,329,22,34,526,200,413,0.20600000000000002,0.648,0.146,-0.9857,2,3,0,0,0,1,39.0,0,0,5,3,29,29,3,6,10,0,40,5,2,7,3,68,75,39,4,5,18,1,3,3,5,3,2,1,0,2,16,22,0,1,13,0,5,9,15,15,1,0,7,6,49,14,47,62,5,34,0,3,1,1,22,9,1,2,20,221,65,6,0.08880386256936995,0.0,0.17331951951304794,0.0,0.0,0.08677810672550626,0.07871926604928467,0.0,0.0,0.09197401977819568,0.0,0.07101641681277329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06038967176137565,0.09311859285540007,0.06793471179870733,0.0,0.0880695693591125,0.0,0.0,0.1461560246302484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165360414985422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649666437214142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17181343439097668,0.1831057658890006,0.0,0.0,0.09216438902524528,0.09278113544632477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407746555464416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418423211395077,0.0,0.07865386385359363,0.0,0.0,0.11730822739578818,0.0,0.0,0.0848558962909578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999290343339468,0.1347057035177776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116512157078594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.343048219667948,0.08209773997900523,0.0,0.0,0.20187712633595573,0.07448446665246537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07852896239083393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09439435325541308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17490783290987424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268816055459926,0.0,0.07893295334267136,0.0982483165461486,0.09247555735944724,0.0976085608929674,0.0723870004876856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015524478509827,0.0,0.15683087522187356,0.0,0.07457287873396785,0.0,0.0969399062614244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855453567669685,0.09003317832796265,0.0,0.09673344008243652,0.0,0.0,0.0894934065785386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13056211378374696,0.06584693886553097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675393391393121,0.0,0.0,0.09860618015468932,0.09616592928939452,0.0,0.06156541685653141,0.1550802149418324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497330325528005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05689002831479877,0.09130516098373756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886799565687473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940865366709672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18567415708646945,0.1016591765039547,0.09713701220075582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13353890575021585,0.07137718090273171,0.07761849007431422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799468066756046,0.05690192939164164,0.0,0.14100069478474556,0.05178224640594505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866435883242758,0.06029199344596746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766980247391596,0.0,0.0,0.2095152758886264,0.0,0.07123310198673298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013167341162446,0.0,0.0,0.08560375454364681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718677594567221
mentalhealth,notme28064212,2020/02/10,"How to cope with dysphoria and how to have courage to talk about it to therapist I was happy with my body, and i crossdress alone on occasions, but recently i can't bear looking at the parts of my body i can't control without feeling disgust, the body hair that i continuously shave only for it to start growing in a matter of days, my masculine facial features, the muscle i can't get rid of, and even the veins on my hands that are sometimes visible, looking at all that and remembering its still there makes me want to cry, and i keep thinking that even if work my butt and thighs or lose weight, the fact that i will always be a man no matter how much i work or how many dresses i wear, the masculine features will always be there. I haven't talked to my therapist about this yet, i have tried to get the words out of my mouth but i end up being too ashamed of actually saying how i feel.",8.241333333333333,5.880956355555563,8.197222222222226,76.36750000000002,63.22222222222222,11.444444444444445,36.944444444444436,9.827888789773867,3.290611111111112,704,26,146,11,8,229,102,180,0.09,0.821,0.08900000000000001,-0.6452,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,4,14,5,1,1,9,0,13,12,11,7,2,33,24,16,0,2,6,0,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,9,9,1,2,4,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,1,8,22,2,26,18,3,15,0,1,2,1,4,7,1,3,7,106,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.1354320456456207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437371818224326,0.0,0.0,0.2309569040555332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4624693926651518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556567714870692,0.0,0.0,0.15244644816321787,0.08950345948471528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292041553718246,0.0,0.0,0.1833295320908987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034556168323314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501662612335126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477369285313197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335657714817908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330852876813739,0.15526251412780168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09263863258086764,0.1407040309272839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202136610595652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055506141130487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502883063796439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703132524347605,0.0,0.15721391925975015,0.0,0.0,0.11036569568102536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13725979108080044,0.0,0.09823121823408668,0.0,0.1108321663212061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22309680177359933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3222751799085467,0.0,0.08892644891174581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422444778731352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818577229135092,0.0,0.0,0.169000127615096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378171858962365,0.0,0.20207114093063155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xoxoggirl,2020/02/10,"How do I deal with being tired ALL THE TIME Capitalization may have been a bit extra, but It's been months of me having so little emotional ability to get up and do things. Today was one of the first sunny days there have been in a while, and I just longingly glanced out the window and continued watching Bojack Horseman for 4 hours. I also pepped myself up to go to the gym. This was 2 hours ago, and now I'm on the couch in my gym clothes. I can't handle living like this every day. I have the want to go out and do things, but not the will.",3.2128947368421072,3.9918151578947385,4.562236842105263,87.73440789473686,72.85964912280701,7.454385964912281,22.144736842105264,7.645422480735847,0.6839157894736845,424,9,94,5,8,141,78,114,0.040999999999999995,0.851,0.10800000000000001,0.75,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,9,0,16,1,0,1,1,16,21,11,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,2,0,5,8,0,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,2,5,2,8,1,15,13,3,23,1,0,2,0,1,8,0,1,14,72,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887239934802146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17025694542389372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23243287759949866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746072137030603,0.21949170198176324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23948509962124245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793783724510381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18109358037898168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112320458606198,0.0,0.24199322088812575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4193294268909349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040127311521592,0.21338284920880213,0.18799558582227266,0.1884107879173009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993563947405266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426730602219948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828840824184365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12414435275588095,0.24469851364692946,0.20180536394901125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557459420434286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shemale118,2020/02/10,"I hear voices I  had this problem for a long time but i am afraid to talk about it, i am  afraid i would just be locked up in some ward and never getting out  again. I am also afraid people will look down upon me if they find out.

I  may have had a mild psychotic episode lately which is why i havn't been  posted on reddit lately but now it's just voices and some occasional  hallucinations.

I am considering  seeking help, do you think i would benefit from starting on  anti-psychotics, any good long term studies on this?",3.831176470588237,5.455674617647063,4.768774509803921,83.58198529411767,72.43137254901961,7.060784313725492,24.514705882352942,7.645422480735847,1.1665058823529413,409,12,80,5,8,133,73,102,0.021,0.862,0.11699999999999999,0.8844,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,0,6,6,0,3,2,0,15,0,0,0,1,18,20,6,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,4,13,2,13,12,3,20,0,0,1,0,5,9,0,4,10,61,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736845189329805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14769473819057258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985051587624352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347134372188568,0.0,0.0,0.1821663122291776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447857500093377,0.0,0.1455759966530019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4899932250503619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3844076607826627,0.18238254124399966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750815159572036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150570252478745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208005293800886,0.0,0.0,0.20781881092295615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372621231690298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745668379829252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391647829656214,0.0,0.0,0.12664359819781792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959776594260585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30856709950933225,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,matchbox5738,2020/02/10,"Asking for help In the past month or so, I've felt much more anxious in social interactions. I have almost of the symptoms associated with a paranoid personality disorder, and I fell like I'm becoming gradually more scopophobic. I recently told my parents, but I said that I wanted to speak to a therapist because the anxiety I had when I was younger may be coming back. They were understanding and said that they would find someone for me to talk to. It's been quite some time since then, and I don't know what's going on. They said that they would let me know what's happening, but I haven't heard from them about this since.     
If I don't get help soon, I think it's just going to get worse and worse, but I don't know what to say. Should I just tell them what's really going on?",6.867658227848103,5.69951041772152,7.347943037974683,77.5583702531646,65.07594936708861,10.937974683544304,31.775316455696203,10.125756701596842,2.745301265822784,618,19,131,12,8,204,94,158,0.105,0.845,0.049,-0.8018,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,6,1,7,1,0,0,5,0,15,1,0,0,0,27,36,12,0,5,7,1,1,1,0,4,1,6,0,1,10,6,0,0,7,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,10,7,22,1,16,20,4,17,0,0,0,0,22,4,0,5,9,88,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371704060498087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479293308438696,0.15475373835616066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280622182346094,0.0,0.0,0.10533279133163044,0.0,0.08350461165696207,0.15128885689529853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800020370265504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569963527667632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152680979363424,0.0,0.1252015490807654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313772094213748,0.0,0.2335547133924255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113513229279045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18363593574658552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22584965298214485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007615349348548,0.0,0.06692381305627984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933989370131812,0.0,0.10069952820022604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521053164879105,0.0,0.13076741192513916,0.0,0.11960977059316112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570010764846802,0.0,0.0,0.08775591700493575,0.0,0.1352558814625019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3909115033754655,0.10893574462653764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266303458953279,0.0,0.0,0.13963866745376088,0.1160667056536254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237957082633354,0.0,0.11010312613462027,0.11973067995886515,0.0,0.0,0.1590498138092412,0.0,0.08777427505365938,0.0,0.0,0.07987688972106148,0.0,0.0,0.13089476684882656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426059207734589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079713487049593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791982578388141,0.1946200244607343,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tracefant666,2020/02/10,"On the brink of something, but it’s not clear to me what it is or how to come to grips with it About three years ago, I had a bought of mass depression come to a head and left me crying my eyes out at work, and I left to go get help from urgent care.  It was propelled by my use of Chantix to try to quit smoking.  I had never had issues with depression in my 33 years of life at that point, but then I couldn’t stop thinking of ways to “accidentally” fall down stairs, or any number of scenarios that would end in my personal demise.  I got taken to a hospital and had to do the whole paper gown routine where they screen you to make sure you’re not going to off yourself after you leave.  I was given an option to do an out patient program and my job approved me doing half days so I could get help.  During that time, I was prescribed Prozac, which I never really liked or felt entirely like myself on.  The psych at the program seemed pretty indifferent and wasn’t interested in switching me to anything else.  Zoom forward three years— I came out of a bad relationship and within three months I notice that I’m actually smiling and goofing around, feeling a glimmer of my old hyper self and not understanding why then.  I made a choice to see if it lasted for longer than a few weeks, and it did.  It lasted four months.  I decided it’s time to stop the Prozac.  I weened myself off with little to no side effects other than general feelings of being off when I was extending the time between doses.  Everything went well.  I’m now still okay, but I find myself having feelings I feel like I’ve not felt as intensely even before the medication started, but they’re not suicidal ideation, just feelings of insecurity on a myriad of subjects.  I have pretty good self esteem, but I’ll find myself feeling like I shouldn’t be with anyone because I feel like I am damaged in some way and that they’ll figure it out eventually and leave.  It wasn’t always like that.  I’ve always been a very sure person that knows what I want and figures out the best way to proceed with it.  I worry that maybe I just am not used to feeling emotions without the pills the way I did before.  It’s disheartening at times because I feel like I’m having to relearn how to be and not sure if my autopilot is ever going to return to normal.  Is this normal for getting off antidepressants?  To be clear, I do feel good— I just have off times where I’m afraid to express what I am feeling because I’m unclear if it’s an appropriate reaction based on how I process my emotions right now.  I’ve been off Prozac for about two months now.",7.233874423448888,6.082802431334628,7.548365570599612,76.36120629370632,64.3384912959381,10.12019044785002,33.42426722213956,9.057496981413335,2.711139026930516,2055,70,402,28,26,674,242,517,0.109,0.725,0.166,0.9855,2,0,1,0,0,0,36.0,0,2,2,5,20,23,0,2,22,1,37,9,2,8,8,100,81,32,1,10,22,0,14,7,0,3,7,0,0,4,27,27,0,2,23,0,1,9,15,7,1,6,23,17,50,16,80,49,4,83,0,4,3,0,12,38,0,10,41,278,77,6,0.0,0.0,0.06855236383265333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06227102154461884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690469298460368,0.0,0.0,0.04777136195567026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04911935682996763,0.0,0.05780849730565256,0.06253602324384827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05865453010635555,0.1284684282075893,0.0,0.11955253141681912,0.0,0.07372142514451446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803455242291588,0.0716229871342672,0.0,0.0,0.1210256567236473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608767941473783,0.0,0.0771646350733429,0.04530444541118656,0.0,0.12100979191490215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05868357453112726,0.1580401254034826,0.062219285016303236,0.0,0.0,0.04639844552762158,0.06354375418060577,0.0,0.0,0.0631347865095239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3907170550749934,0.2007420564217211,0.13489907671814186,0.0,0.12841164019089446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010576339300784,0.0,0.11977145666819525,0.11784215124036368,0.056184111055373034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209518699333972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417212438800203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332114147523851,0.06971075737529417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03860671664862688,0.11452374223349268,0.0,0.1487659528528444,0.15265031541403934,0.0,0.04961856503413088,0.2402389453579918,0.07040741219651284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647079171337153,0.04689139276726626,0.0,0.07057402044948614,0.0,0.0,0.0707679332828346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682149525094176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835988659364736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765715195172976,0.0,0.07997833770430116,0.07371394206713935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267649192436444,0.0,0.0,0.06640750133326383,0.0,0.0,0.14293587789263962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471788462880928,0.0,0.0,0.04500296251043365,0.0,0.0,0.07542055665612851,0.0,0.05999180130195737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055978927794645,0.06395155994872011,0.1465689295155931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0540806968013858,0.0,0.0,0.04972222179770072,0.0,0.05610051117365035,0.1174617167293578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684041382888547,0.0,0.1986250275510309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04501237687936364,0.0,0.0,0.20481221074613076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047694093342934236,0.0,0.0686225382547114,0.07313112466220237,0.0,0.1213442297079272,0.0,0.05796233679699946,0.041434361985219416,0.22303983209474784,0.05634907756544294,0.0,0.06316180234939453,0.06512102652727915,0.06338830901062463,0.07842989725594497,0.0,0.06771700894861345,0.0,0.0511417157849153,0.07134072141984918,0.0,0.049902490700960325,0.0,0.0,0.090475410549451
mentalhealth,boom-a-child,2020/02/10,coping i do scribble drawings and just straight up scribble into a notebook and write my thoughts into a notebook when i feel anxious or depressed or anything. safe to say i’ve gone through a few notebooks,8.893157894736841,8.637101473684211,7.346315789473685,76.23421052631579,60.57894736842106,7.6,50.57894736842106,3.1291,4.160221052631578,168,12,26,0,2,50,29,38,0.139,0.735,0.126,-0.128,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,11,4,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,2,3,1,5,2,1,6,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,2,1,19,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5503538013596254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4008923847934758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195914642758225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463234791501868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3874103578756597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3867517944114568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loserhippiegirl,2020/02/10,"Self diagnosing First of all, I'm very aware of the fact that self-diagnosing is generally a bad idea, and I try not to do that. 
However, I also feel really nervous about the idea of talking to my therapist about it, and I'm really scared of getting an official diagnosis. 

Can anyone else relate to this? Simply looking at the diagnostic criteria, I get concerned, but I'm nervous to directly ask my therapist about it.",8.358164556962027,7.560222759493673,10.036550632911393,58.282420886075975,61.911392405063296,14.482278481012655,41.268987341772146,13.427899808715575,6.084415189873417,334,17,56,13,4,120,52,79,0.12,0.88,0.0,-0.7982,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,3,5,0,3,1,0,0,2,10,11,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,2,5,0,12,11,1,2,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452112959633806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636311085548255,0.18516824170043933,0.0,0.0,0.16894811591021924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508930362354366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668524963473363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15096775512639982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09137708954810324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15371971307164506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888367123592533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40802010216009205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15175866589125506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315467753462765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18093150932798635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3770592101289228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14525529834405226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4196579873341662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269651707996325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491123187031129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idonotexist4859,2020/02/10,"I kinda dont see a point anymore Sorry if this reads like a bitchy teenager, I am not good at writing very well.

So point blank my girlfriend of a decent length of time left me and it was the final crack in the levee that brought the whole mess down. I have had really bad depression and anxiety for a long time (2010 iirc) and I feel like I've hit the wall of not having a point to continue any longer. What do I do?",1.4648863636363636,3.2248020795454586,2.913636363636368,93.76545454545456,79.3409090909091,6.218181818181819,20.090909090909093,7.1686216300943375,0.2730636363636365,325,8,74,4,8,106,65,88,0.205,0.715,0.08,-0.8906,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,9,0,8,0,0,0,0,9,12,5,0,1,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,3,1,0,3,2,7,4,8,8,1,14,0,1,1,0,2,8,0,2,7,45,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337023891062478,0.0,0.15040706474813034,0.0,0.19498552463408034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16416217763272778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16934097775238238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304269155786209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941255329074328,0.14045911315335413,0.0,0.2153780092913316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490818466592053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213618693639284,0.0,0.0,0.19210864678139927,0.0,0.0,0.17399476537569272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5575835324355763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966644514120206,0.0,0.12595419846073047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566737074127273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200901926681316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292911968497029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16222486842914782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17677712187077993,0.0,0.0,0.2195094343386773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoninflammatoryFun,2020/02/10,"I’m harassing someone and afraid I won’t stop- should I do inpatient care? 28 female, USA. 

As the title says, I knew I was texting/emailing my ex too much (I don’t even care about them... it’s my mental health).  But today they said I’m harassing them so I have to stop for good. 

I’m afraid I won’t though. Should I do an inpatient care, intensive all-day outpatient, or regular therapy? I’m having a huge mental health crisis over the thought that I won’t. What if I do it again tomorrow or Tuesday? 

I just stared a new job, but I have another on offer for next month if I absolutely MUST take some time off for my mental health. I’d have to manage the money and my animals and stuff if I go.",0.5769741379310354,2.750667434482761,2.9995474137931017,89.69863146551725,85.0,6.935344827586206,20.786637931034484,8.07648339933343,1.101146551724138,538,17,118,12,16,185,87,145,0.084,0.8390000000000001,0.077,-0.22399999999999998,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,3,0,7,8,2,2,6,0,15,3,0,0,1,19,27,13,0,6,8,1,0,0,0,6,3,2,0,0,5,3,0,2,2,0,1,1,4,4,0,0,4,3,21,4,10,17,2,15,0,0,1,0,7,4,0,6,10,75,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530535600719409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4464530166710452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941332158464522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096406320575177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295339291367737,0.12242574164455365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4654513574597542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448444564605114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44128516313860944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650522952331027,0.0,0.10729863774977276,0.0,0.0,0.14097071110333773,0.1552319147079746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388429934166894,0.116074595478178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367286746344355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24406101949212386,0.0,0.0,0.1670912156294442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974502677956144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16691991480859047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14340662071693855,0.1158772788960318,0.08511143605079452,0.0,0.13835461659886042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RedditSmurf190871,2020/02/10,"I thought I might be a psychopath? If there is a better sub for this please let me know. So I've been trying to understand myself more recently because I suspected I was some sort of psychopath. After doing some research it's clear that I must have something else wrong with me. 

I manipulate everyone in my life. I used to be way worse as a child basically manipulating everyone in my life and all the teachers at school. I never had trouble making friends because I would act differently based on who I talked to. I tried to stop this when I was about 17 and quickly realized how hard it is not to manipulate people. I often lie/manipulate for no reason other than to see how believable I can be. This was the first red flag when I found it I can't stop myself from lying and using people.

What really started me thinking was when I was watching this video on anger and violent criminals I realized how stereotype some of my behaviors as a child where.

* I harmed animals and killed birds for fun
* I started fires all the time and really enjoyed Arson 
* I had a lot of sexual frustration growing up, after being molested by a cousin when I was 6 I went and tried it on my sister....twice.

Now all I needed to check was my emotions like empathy and yes, It's really really low. But I do feel sad and lonely, I do miss friends even if I used and exploited them all my teenage years. I'm 20 now and feel like I have zero identity. Like I don't even exist outside of the person I pretend to be for whatever gain I'm going for.",3.356423841059602,5.152503622516559,5.180140397350993,79.4393629139073,74.03311258278144,8.673059602649008,27.64291390728477,9.281916038205594,2.5418289801324505,1202,47,229,29,25,411,168,302,0.198,0.6809999999999999,0.121,-0.9718,1,2,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,3,17,20,5,0,10,1,29,2,0,11,7,55,49,24,1,5,4,1,4,3,2,3,2,0,0,3,13,12,0,2,11,2,1,4,5,12,0,2,13,7,42,8,33,27,9,32,0,4,3,0,9,9,0,9,21,171,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864642873221662,0.0,0.0,0.13736562705797906,0.0,0.10783110916509524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273837310627026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185113845867398,0.13714712185739705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16105816789310876,0.0,0.0,0.2330055699407831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329600571621692,0.08710191542712979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10370776042062167,0.0,0.13368242968075109,0.18839503071613584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929173006232398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092191851062892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488988976124475,0.0,0.06700576906283008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467467098038075,0.17223583865810246,0.1786964625766706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365469343643192,0.0,0.0,0.08138464255829572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12934118396281674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040446327153967,0.09403464172893647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905230715035888,0.10645858286960104,0.0,0.1338349946573255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124283414787169,0.1253572939740296,0.12038439162511018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339272663291365,0.09715695697023824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386238963575458,0.0,0.0,0.1725956517561587,0.0,0.0,0.2038664084419322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799720139647858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812342493660322,0.0,0.0967933540461199,0.07109436329126956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483334260162767,0.0,0.0,0.12692628837150424,0.0,0.3159073396573945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677691331000958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130239720806844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425009563090447,0.08661070036080107,0.13330381354486034,0.0,0.07851450461738338
mentalhealth,fuckhaus,2020/02/10,"Can’t stop isolating myself from my own girlfriend firstly i know I should probably get some real therapy for my struggles, I am going to but just deciding whether to try and afford something private or try my university counselling services

Anyways, im a 22 year old guy from the UK, i live in a pretty expensive city and in my 2nd year at university. Fair to say i have a lot going on, working weekends at a restaurant and studying monday through friday. i’ve been with my girlfriend for about a year and she is great.

Since i was 16 i’ve had a few struggles with my mental state. I’m not suicidal, i don’t have depression and i’m very grateful that i am relatively okay in that regard.
I have the disorder trichotillomania giving me pretty big bald spots across my head from hair pulling when stressed or anxious. When i was younger it got bad around the time of a big exam or around my parents divorcing etc but nowadays it’s daily. I also tend to isolate myself pretty bad. I know its pretty common to hide in your room or avoid social situations when you feel stressed / anxious but its getting to the point where i can’t speak to my own girlfriend for like an entire day or two pretty much weekly, I have to be completely on my own, not just physically but i also cant even answer any calls or look at the messages she has sent. Its never been this bad, and it’s hurting her bad bc it seems like i’m ignoring her and don’t care... I can see where she’s coming from, it’s pretty weird for her to explain to her friends that her boyfriend hasn’t called or messaged her for a couple days every week. 

I think my trich shows i struggle dealing with stress and this is another way it comes out, i just hope it doesnt stay as i know this one can’t last or she’ll have no choice but to end things
I’m not really asking for a set solution, i hope counselling will help me soon.. just hoped maybe others have experienced something similar or have anything they can relate with and that i’m not the only one",4.7419608386441325,5.609135241895267,5.445114990302024,82.4765798466796,69.39900249376558,8.135254456451463,29.814445368061328,8.285830014693849,2.0499253902281334,1596,60,314,22,27,518,211,401,0.156,0.675,0.17,0.9076,2,1,2,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,1,2,17,24,0,7,16,1,31,3,3,0,1,61,60,30,1,4,23,1,2,2,4,3,0,2,1,1,19,18,0,3,9,2,1,6,14,15,0,4,7,7,49,9,42,49,8,50,0,2,2,0,33,19,0,15,23,212,68,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450515574268795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0529372349756987,0.08162721682063405,0.0,0.17588527016534655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06405976049628076,0.1385970180200153,0.07277451934740667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599891244893248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15897679374884205,0.0,0.0793681139571971,0.0,0.0,0.1341130620059182,0.08161894833232451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613395582221874,0.0,0.10040710475875517,0.08025472462056726,0.06704774080864598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921705612631144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894751951984203,0.0,0.0868176959093488,0.05141585487309555,0.0,0.06558772725330507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03936074537085686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621487415080175,0.0,0.0,0.06014281476579295,0.0,0.08134154620813915,0.0746759687260681,0.08848215730740594,0.0,0.062259717267407824,0.08582433147622806,0.0,0.07707873862293659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989137630249951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521778286488299,0.0,0.0,0.2319527980767494,0.0,0.0,0.08333462830772266,0.0,0.08408590355939531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12834464502593046,0.06345402354800507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606222030519585,0.0,0.06873851646246873,0.0,0.06537015170331198,0.0,0.0,0.06618099217643998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820571469536608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844939961826213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057224994727613984,0.0,0.06003882392835048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168517941385636,0.0,0.1054995046466468,0.059204591809156125,0.0,0.0,0.08643760392556832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358863884789756,0.0,0.0,0.4751777955262367,0.08393002165727723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886045947896602,0.049869467888064116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06190542819135401,0.0,0.0,0.06203234601313379,0.07086711823726942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439414653061086,0.08750098464598259,0.0,0.07935312261765465,0.0,0.1198576903409665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297235840801798,0.0,0.0650818633234813,0.26751337941262865,0.2441413290365264,0.0,0.08514973984338785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902248383741104,0.0,0.051716725345543516,0.04987990030279529,0.0,0.0,0.045392015979035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570322146522493,0.0,0.07604320420233163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642302357971426,0.0,0.061789697410639735,0.12488504566873287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05667205025635898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503887854052673
mentalhealth,ThatThatdat,2020/02/10,"An Interesting Title I don’t know where to begin.  


My mom abused me pretty bad growing up, I was the youngest kid and really got the least attention contrary to popular belief.  My dad cheated on my mom lots, lots of fighting.  My dad left, my mom drank.  Bad divorce.  I was alone in high school.  My girlfriend since like 5th grade-9th left me which in retrospect who cares but at the time I’m sure contributed.  That was up until 9th grade.

I went to a new school, fit in pretty well but went back to the old one because of commute.  Messed up and got caught selling weed my first week.  My bad for sure I own that till I die.  I try to have more guilt than shame around it.  I was young and so fucking stupid but it’s still no excuse.  As a result I was a product of a cancel culture in the area I lived in.  I was an outcast.  

My parents sent me to programs all over the country (I don’t think they could deal with a depressed son on their own) from then until I graduated high school.  I never felt I fit in anywhere, I was exposed to a lot of really messed up things.  I saw someone try and hang themselves.  I tried to hang myself.  I saw someone cut their wrists the river way not the side way.  I saw people overdose.  I was apart of many fights.  It was a different world.

I had a tough time transitioning and dealt with a drug abuse of Xanax once I was alone in my dorm room freshman year on a Friday and Saturday for the 6th week in a row.  I was a wreck.  In Miami alone on weekends.  Nobody wanted to be with me, everyone I asked to hang out with were busy.   I kicked that habit after. Same story at the next big university I went to too.  All my old friends never wanted to be apart of me, they used to act like they didn’t know me in the gym when we had hung out that weekend.  My best friend also died of a heroine overdose.  I have never done drugs like that he was unique in that sense.  That tore me to fucking pieces like nothing I can describe.  

My friend dying took a piece of my soul.  It took my peace, it took my happiness.  He wouldn’t want that but I don’t know what to do.  

I am 22 220 rock solid lbs, I am 6’ tall, I consider myself at least decent looking but I can’t pick up a girl anymore like I used to when I was younger. I’ve just been alone.  My friends have sucked me dry of any cash potential or opportunities they could from me, nobody wants to hear me talk.  

I haven’t gone out with friends in 4 months and haven’t been consistently out in 4 years.

I used to be popular and someone who people wanted to be around.

I wish I could’ve always been with minimal friends, it would hurt less than all my friends giving up on me.  They don’t want to hear my sorrow.  

I just got diagnosed with a stomach disease called Barrett Esophagus not sure as far how progressed it is, I am a line cook so this complicates things with work.

I used to have dreams, I used to say I wanted to be a stock broker on Wall Street with a rolls Royce, I was a jock, I wanted to be a baseball player, at least in college.  

I have achieved nothing that I dreamed of and my times running out for real now.  I am a consistent disappointment to myself and the people around me.  

I have really always dreamed of being the kid that was the kid that people wanted to be with, genuine happy.  Instead I got friends that said that “life is a dark place, you’ll get other friends” when I asked why they stopped talking to me.  

I can get so angry thinking about it that I punch my wooden dresser until my knuckles bleed and I’m crying.  I hate this life that I’ve lived so much.  I’ve done nothing and nobody wants to care or help or even sit down and just have a conversation with me.  It sucks.",1.8588226086956536,3.765721430666666,3.0451304347826103,92.59039130434783,78.69333333333333,5.8411594202898565,22.469565217391306,6.768245384624635,0.4573913043478264,2843,87,622,28,69,915,326,750,0.145,0.687,0.168,0.9549,2,4,2,0,6,1,75.0,1,1,8,6,24,49,10,2,40,0,60,13,2,8,9,92,118,37,3,15,13,7,1,5,10,3,7,4,3,4,33,33,2,1,8,8,3,15,15,22,1,2,43,9,105,27,106,62,18,111,2,4,4,2,54,59,4,6,39,411,138,12,0.0,0.12316567616483208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21532506462429046,0.0,0.04156503808486674,0.08649607857314759,0.0,0.0,0.035345334492329725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05154603919513594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13880847659891118,0.09718073601817016,0.0,0.0,0.039966191159141455,0.13019289598797915,0.03168397257834598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054545408050163904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05307311530485514,0.0,0.10598560869793326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449536973545447,0.0,0.05709298889524605,0.0,0.053584779930533566,0.044766690722031585,0.05275435510639628,0.16182806082721574,0.05430366106122707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063786026024051,0.0,0.0,0.1205508814033662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03432953363606723,0.0,0.0,0.04966511574862751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04990493042394016,0.0,0.0,0.04421059914258799,0.0,0.0,0.36140745083583004,0.09610160134959304,0.05431043310384055,0.049859934965875936,0.0,0.0,0.1662792197759937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106584367387252,0.0,0.05131535377281325,0.0,0.0,0.11716103524110665,0.0,0.03483829118621275,0.1098305981141913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055641181744429585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569364098490034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294374365285258,0.0,0.07342410625797972,0.12696378173843867,0.0,0.0917911884890774,0.0,0.04364659164439865,0.0,0.0,0.13256393009104192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05269531545036038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826203285278996,0.041486597267026436,0.0,0.038208202239837986,0.0,0.12026085128442025,0.050198563119609685,0.05527686572378816,0.0,0.0,0.149616580252719,0.0,0.1090797428605445,0.05535254348207152,0.035220155361558036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05771298831280525,0.0,0.0,0.1441339347266058,0.0,0.05430366106122707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575617290874577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05915985301906184,0.0998911082681566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04944089956128635,0.04133325186551124,0.0,0.15780688982636454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04299492879666585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211681054079194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04150795060989446,0.0434541061619203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695976312867282,0.0,0.0,0.0835523777673572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906083995604666,0.06660800328750409,0.0,0.0,0.0909225418817216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17324111873880926,0.1058644937156317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22445206773258528,0.0,0.0,0.30656680569477035,0.0825119605948998,0.08338372252116248,0.0,0.04673249703974122,0.14454629536581715,0.046900086017282766,0.0,0.05976961872525381,0.0,0.0,0.03783901017113315,0.0,0.0,0.03692212559195118,0.0,0.0,0.06694143767909944
mentalhealth,prabhjit94,2020/02/10,"Anxiety Issues Not really sure what is wrong with me. I always seem to have anxiety one way or another, this is especially strong when having to do social tasks set out by other people but not when I do the tasks that I set out myself.

So for example, if I have to call someone for something serious on my behalf I feel no anxiety at all. But if I have to call someone for another person's behalf (ie for work or for one of my relatives) I get really anxious. This is pretty much for anything that requires social interaction in some way. If I do it for myself I can do it without feeling anything but if I do it for someone else I feel such a dread. Tomorrow I have to make a phone call for someone and I'm already feeling super anxious and cannot stop thinking about it.",5.623782051282049,5.446271249999999,7.281538461538464,73.73012820512822,67.26923076923077,10.266666666666666,34.0,9.994966539143718,3.407684615384615,609,26,114,13,9,213,84,156,0.157,0.755,0.08800000000000001,-0.6542,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,4,5,6,0,1,3,0,15,0,0,1,2,29,24,14,0,4,12,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,10,5,0,2,6,0,0,0,5,3,0,2,0,4,17,3,24,24,3,13,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,8,4,92,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593411420940513,0.0,0.10249707632606322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583335915296262,0.2827010839136472,0.27832060989421625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20273615401950848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37734699006013467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290253819999053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491375576183116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435737549001494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856973389582144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222476858366802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09055275304640492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669422712270852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539870912387842,0.10755754482706056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532011514733807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15782675495973006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214003054775644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25113654444393085,0.41748595735481975,0.09483132227289368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298545111944307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609733301779215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892988571860453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19555186460289045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874280249284502,0.0,0.08967777447467656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346798962985592,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emmalouisek,2020/02/10,"I need to share this with someone. Someone suggested to me that i write down my feelings and show it to my family. So i did, and i can't wait to share it. I think if i get it all out then i might feel better.   


I feel sad. I don't have any place in the world. I don't like myself. I hate me. I don't like the way i look. I don't have any motivation to change, or to do anything. I think about killing myself or harming myself but i wouldn't do it. I feel like there is nothing to look forward to.   


When i go outside, i feel like people are staring at me and thinking bad things about me. People make me feel like everything is my fault. Or like i am a bad person  


I just feel stuck. I don't know how to explain it. And the night they came, i just felt so nervous. I just cried. I know i'm not going to be able to do it, and i'm sorry. What happens if i can't go in straight away? Then they won't help. I can't do it straight away. So what's the point? I know i won't be able to do it. Or talk.  


That's how i feel.",-1.6979440993788837,0.10303283913043693,1.0040062111801262,102.49489130434785,92.34782608695652,3.9813664596273295,16.475155279503106,5.288315135182226,-0.9939627329192552,763,19,204,4,28,261,100,230,0.244,0.7240000000000001,0.032,-0.9922,0,0,0,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,2,2,12,17,2,1,5,0,26,0,0,4,1,45,57,20,1,4,11,0,9,6,0,4,0,0,0,1,14,8,0,1,17,1,0,5,12,8,0,0,4,12,43,9,22,47,1,22,0,1,3,0,10,13,0,7,11,136,57,1,0.2240167523340476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233907344891404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217334985329913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21047111299838805,0.0,0.1870446310129336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906230645559128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810774296319302,0.0,0.0,0.11849001020404205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230359417113221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066590615713296,0.0,0.1055915285600719,0.0,0.4530784037215066,0.2400564189421608,0.10754560637932817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851975357202908,0.0,0.190970824229284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904863713115623,0.0,0.0,0.11058508229919346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750768535095182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239206728072382,0.0,0.18467062280789215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283298090015452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881176518998206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07476646085078344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11882318657630075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305279167486714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105112273377261,0.0,0.10747505781486988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155305009728811,0.09780139370457402,0.1170249133269121,0.0,0.10588411978451198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898086672908002,0.0,0.0,0.12538420685816076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002808996117301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441338808655905,0.21531133424347546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890703544061884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nick_meh,2020/02/10,"You are worth it. Just a reminder to everyone that you are worth it. No matter what you are going through, there are people that care, people that value you, people that will do anything to make you happy. You might not be able to see or process that right now - but out there somewhere there are people who care very deeply about you. You just have to find them. It's different for everyone, but from my experience, I channelled into creative processes and managed to find the right people to talk to and take my mind off things. They tried to convince me to go and get professional help - which is totally acceptable to do, but I felt as if I would be better off without it. We all go through these experiences at some point and to certain levels throughout our lives - it shouldn't be seen as something out of the ordinary.   


If anyone is feeling like they are reaching a tipping point please reach out, there are anonymous lines to call or online chats that are available for anyone to talk to 24/7. Please, don't give up. You are worth it. <3  


Here is a link to some global suicide hotlines that are available 24/7. If your country is not on there, a google search of ""Local Suicide Hotline"" should come up with the number to call - if not call one from another country with the same language as your own. If that is not possible, feel free to message me or any loved ones - it is not something to be ashamed of, and they will be there for you when you need it. Stay strong everyone. You are worth it <3  
[https://ibpf.org/resource/list-international-suicide-hotlines](https://ibpf.org/resource/list-international-suicide-hotlines)",7.963902345251827,9.029346937716266,6.228068050749713,79.00712322183777,62.32179930795847,8.359938485197999,31.280469050365248,8.167268648758528,2.107793387158785,1311,44,231,14,18,381,148,289,0.065,0.7440000000000001,0.192,0.9868,1,0,2,0,0,4,61.0,2,14,4,2,12,12,0,1,8,0,32,1,0,1,3,53,49,20,2,9,19,0,3,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,22,13,0,0,7,2,5,4,9,1,0,2,2,5,27,12,45,36,6,24,0,0,2,1,31,17,0,11,3,175,49,2,0.10461090883089452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113900526592529,0.10969365910236166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14629275955868665,0.0,0.08608586454073068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925198477455916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3204583023513741,0.0,0.2133155870093905,0.0,0.0,0.09011303507491568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092961344313204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998806191697909,0.0,0.20465908419243564,0.0,0.0,0.10578883742203513,0.07473405417103897,0.10044287765885307,0.0,0.19122495097006229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05465488220810631,0.1003523159998916,0.17835837074381222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136025768243274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011848708602986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051107605953666264,0.0,0.09237334905837537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441542950245103,0.0,0.06982859396164189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097564274473716,0.105627196701276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756766337809554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177411835082832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3626201622076762,0.0,0.0,0.2296627276599689,0.1977822441582391,0.11793308162895247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17867428911457794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336135031819877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16106917688923209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150130988941637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22885471044687805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865438445259487,0.1681645718549494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949883949137019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102394025577508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631495552614554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084118306399524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431258819986464,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zraufi2k12,2020/02/10,"Years of anxiety Just years of anxiety that I keep pushing down , unhappiness , dark thoughts. Everyday I think about losing my job. I have health issues that are already going to lead me to an early death. Just one win would be nice just one...",4.186333333333334,6.5259164666666685,4.530833333333334,82.61625000000002,73.22222222222223,8.055555555555555,26.805555555555557,8.841846274778883,2.2002222222222234,191,7,35,4,4,60,35,45,0.242,0.638,0.12,-0.6908,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,5,3,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,0,8,8,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,1,0,5,2,6,5,0,8,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,23,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931732212232423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4064733266617173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15098626487483888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823945650899129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27729023915208706,0.2636362745470413,0.2361395174788999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29721654099285433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3600494526235891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17023047512016407,0.0,0.2109121388510091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18872419744620564,0.0,0.0,0.3421652708054613
mentalhealth,MrMemeConnoisseur,2020/02/10,"Why do I feel so 'empty'? I am 15M, held back a couple times so im still in middle school. I do not have a horrible life, I am kind of spoiled, my family is doing financially ok, and my family is nice to me. I play a lot of video games and read a lot. Introvert, basically. Despite all these things going good for me, I feel empty. During winters I feel suicidal. I am living a respectful life with a respectful family, so why do i feel this suicidal emptiness, despite not having a reason to feel this way?",2.080474649406689,3.8203272524271834,5.026731391585763,79.40723840345201,77.44660194174756,8.849622437971954,24.06580366774541,9.444778638647367,2.265695577130529,389,13,78,11,9,141,60,103,0.128,0.69,0.182,0.5873,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,7,1,11,2,0,1,1,15,18,5,2,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,6,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,5,13,7,7,17,3,8,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,4,54,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242106723096139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17873573352958247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45684330483039404,0.0,0.4083854984352441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180423179019696,0.13548814301928633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17448584020924993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16821415396266778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22819431468265305,0.0,0.0,0.1426386265947555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27466306567381005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16157901060945862,0.0,0.0,0.16608518884190918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634823443842944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290022967392521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3533867930592627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731687349252368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941925306338538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821919980148838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915209604232177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Konigs1255,2020/02/10,I Feel Like I'm in Third-Person. It's like I'm watching a character on a screen. I don't  care about the character enough to put effort into life. I'm losing motivation to play the game and so is the character. I don't know why.,0.4318000000000026,2.2903345800000032,3.414000000000001,88.397,83.2,7.2,20.0,8.238735603445708,0.9605999999999996,179,5,41,4,5,64,34,50,0.111,0.68,0.20800000000000002,0.5532,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,5,0,3,1,0,1,0,5,9,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,3,3,4,6,9,1,4,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,0,2,21,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3503759081363809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3550841680918411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376067310452006,0.24550491097247906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18886203923006725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24273142575953735,0.3357818169734372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3844584558169174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000634920769725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3454649711808345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100922933190696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notfinenordandy,2020/02/11,"Something is wrong and I can’t put my finger on it? I’m a real cuckoo case get ready for the ride! I’m gonna try keeping this short because I’m not really that interesting lol
I’m 17 
I’ve been feeling things that are almost indescribable so I tried my best to express them :D

I don’t think they collectively fit into any type of mental illness/ issue so I made a list!?: 

1. I’ve lost my sense of self, I’m don’t recognise myself and I don’t talk and think the same
2. I spiral very VERY quickly. My main example of this is that I only have to go to college 4 days a week, so I have a 3day weekend (yay) which means from Thursday night to Sunday night I am home alone (my mum travels and works a lot). This leaves me time to I guess float around and do nothing. I mean nothing. and talk to no one for 3 days. This leads me to skip school on Mondays or even the entire week
3. I haven’t cried in a while (again will the loss of sense of self, I used to be very sensitive and cry watching like videos of dogs hugging people)
4. I self-harm (lota punching and cutting) and contemplate suicide daily
5. I get overwhelmed in weird ways? Soz lads I legit can’t elaborate on this. I have no clue how to describe that one
6. On a positive note (?) my mood can LITERALLY change in a single day from venting for an entire hour (to myself lol) about shit/useless I am to, I kid you not, LAUGHING WHOLEHEARTEDLY TO A BAD PUN OR DANCING ALONG MUSIC .Might be the most unsettling thing for me on this list 
7. I get angry/cranky and get this, imaginably violent????? (Is that even English lmfao) So basically (I’ve always had this but it’s become more persistent/creative in the last few months) I will picture myself (usually my head) being beaten my a baseball bat/a hammer or even these weird kitchen ustensiles, they come with a bowl and are used mush spices (or guacamole?) into pastes. There’s also like shooting myself or running a spear through my chest 

I’ve also made a list of reasons *why* I think I’m like this(and yes I know that self-diagnose is a big no no but I have no to talk to this about soooooo): 


1. No friends/lack of social interactions/stimulation which is causing my numbness- I watch youtube/tiktok videos sometimes (because who has the attention span for whole films, can’t relate) but they’re not as funny/entertaining as they used to be (but still funny)
2. I may have diabetes- im not actually sure if I have it but I’m morbidly obese (always have been) and I read somewhere that diabetes can affect your thinking?
3. Shitty childhood?- lol idk about this one since I wouldn’t consider it trauma (sounds too serious) but my parents did not make it a walk in the park either (messy divorce, some light kidnapping, dragged left and right to equally shitty parents to have full custody of me for 10 years)
4. Plot twist (!) I’m the first of my kind and they will name a mental illness after me😌 (i am joking ofc)",1.8805460263007416,4.189492542024016,3.2581620926243566,89.00963307604347,80.69811320754717,5.87637507146941,23.953373356203546,7.100725674708028,0.9729371297884506,2284,83,461,29,60,744,308,583,0.121,0.809,0.071,-0.9756,2,1,1,1,1,1,99.0,0,2,5,7,19,25,3,1,26,5,43,11,3,11,1,73,75,36,1,2,18,3,2,3,0,7,6,1,2,3,28,20,2,1,11,8,0,9,19,13,0,4,7,7,57,11,57,57,13,55,0,3,2,1,21,20,0,14,28,281,85,7,0.0,0.0,0.07874643873069495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080413896153776,0.08357542801443281,0.0,0.12906312990325464,0.13428899790991328,0.0,0.0,0.054875199293013766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183543859777666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737674827046232,0.09838154509520487,0.08912101500567769,0.0,0.0,0.08468416497574956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289573989296177,0.08536434910585826,0.06951138464966583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17727879443553365,0.1561243202426576,0.0,0.0,0.08190347585099629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15989437024489495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04080169180613368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686389158189899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686387119018435,0.0,0.04586068783483538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889436821786982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281609718386984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094341687223833,0.0,0.07946807714707024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871641807070799,0.08422435714892561,0.0,0.07172520431276108,0.0,0.08403116777789545,0.044347725989228336,0.06577699401449345,0.0,0.08544409219890313,0.08767508542314584,0.0,0.0,0.118270141040597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808785542934633,0.06860379346897677,0.0,0.1527106531239566,0.05386437434248815,0.0,0.0,0.17580048534781406,0.0,0.0,0.16264266316310722,0.08560438102168254,0.0,0.0,0.0644097821032396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15145311886521934,0.0,0.1548575840221825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16404255942315288,0.06137199602662269,0.0,0.0,0.1792039476184804,0.0,0.07703227269738283,0.0559435814274522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112051497093672,0.0,0.0,0.08071659031096214,0.09184829543120952,0.05169512518457616,0.08296764594550875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06891287829404326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166739828997475,0.0,0.0,0.33672890569020875,0.0,0.08283200450883832,0.06675153369443929,0.0,0.0,0.08225813872155839,0.0,0.062122763375157326,0.07980917423941865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444293411501953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826696267380009,0.0,0.07605384987458602,0.0,0.0,0.1945781577926732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722001673950478,0.20682375806655331,0.0,0.0,0.04705375950037205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10957288091228322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090830734884263,0.08887387014209981,0.1997448671973604,0.0,0.06405173903057862,0.12945692711254778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281446346522444,0.0900928101326557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05874674137379885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08822704491106342,0.0,0.05196477535668265
mentalhealth,EZ-Br33zy,2020/02/11,"Auditory Hallucinations as I’m falling asleep? I’ve been experiencing auditory hallucinations as I fall asleep for months now, and it’s starting to concern me because they aren’t going away. The auditory hallucinations are voices of people I know or speak often to, like my parents. I can hear these voices almost clearly and it makes me really anxious. On the bright side, these voices only appear to me as I fall asleep, I’ve never heard these voices during the day, and it doesn’t affect my quality of life until I go to bed. 
Despite it only bugging me at night, I’m very scared that this could be an early symptom of psychosis. I’m not paranoid, I’m not delusional, but I do deal with a lot of stress and anxiety a few times a week, so maybe it’s because of that? Either way, I’d really like it if someone who knows what I’m going through could tell me what’s happening to me, because I feel like this isn’t normal.",5.122728937728937,5.929324697802201,6.728296703296702,73.83753663003664,68.50549450549451,8.923809523809524,30.001831501831504,9.075114841892004,2.5415809523809525,733,27,135,13,12,253,106,182,0.063,0.858,0.08,0.4292,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,2,7,0,10,5,3,2,2,25,27,12,0,4,6,1,1,3,0,0,2,7,1,0,16,5,0,0,3,0,0,7,6,2,0,0,2,10,16,4,20,22,3,22,0,0,1,0,8,4,0,6,13,85,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597493857547996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204240822612905,0.1802270282460107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498866276818323,0.0,0.0,0.2917497469909554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25474844686537385,0.0,0.0,0.10288567137227883,0.16447165254338098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066474425139337,0.11397050035679775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719990636393561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410746204984836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980543266930452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17535047282104135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268296807811932,0.2338194878032437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356293626534995,0.0,0.0,0.10648960345180954,0.0,0.16027247236964126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733782278765085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304178520259047,0.0,0.0,0.14971103597108984,0.1563085958696275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24266426927624785,0.0,0.0,0.17714266202696702,0.0,0.0,0.110600185644117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20440201704728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15972049448212666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517190382900118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11291837093131325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827446620639364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16581600680892994,0.0,0.0,0.13943898782721345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930250513679312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163154038285452,0.0,0.1266299733919834,0.12796785445469092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThickArcher8,2020/02/11,"There needs to be more support for people with emotional issues with People who do not have a diagnosis with mental health disorders but have emotional  issues due to circumstances need to be provided with help.


I, for example do not have "" Clinical Depression"" as a result of hormone imbalance, but I have family and personal issues  which could push me to harm myself if not provided with help continously 

Borderline personality disorder etc could even be considered as bullshit, psychiatry is subjective and ruthless in my country. They do not give a shit unless you have a label",17.620909090909084,11.454625636363636,16.23151515151515,37.46727272727273,50.21212121212122,21.28080808080808,57.24242424242424,17.879347455551382,9.58199393939394,474,24,64,20,3,159,66,99,0.115,0.7140000000000001,0.171,0.569,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,0,3,4,1,0,4,0,14,3,1,1,0,20,18,8,0,5,8,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,0,7,1,16,13,2,3,0,1,0,0,8,1,1,1,1,56,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25136614923962075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355813154124899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3608224730899633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3541413922143981,0.0,0.0,0.1755593442896912,0.1039711279258054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14839685962020038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100681913322084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16732479205707598,0.0,0.0,0.21102392290192146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4929011108001364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863730328990427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23344246712423225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21826349179071428,0.27489742577181875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615842432216143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786326852105571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw_away_poo,2020/02/11,Why do I get so super depressed after physical affection? Every time I get physical affection I get depressed the next day to the point where I’m stuck in the bathroom for hours contemplating suicide. I know I’ll get that affection again and I think that this will happen again but does this happen to anyone else or does anyone know why this happens?,5.508636363636364,7.34800107575758,5.8276969696969685,76.79154545454547,68.54545454545455,8.916363636363636,29.86666666666667,9.3871,2.8746157575757576,285,11,48,6,5,91,41,66,0.127,0.731,0.14300000000000002,0.2795,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,3,0,9,14,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,5,1,5,12,0,10,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,7,27,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484911923363595,0.18206530707997765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459591884858435,0.0,0.3060897924763057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31099697643917384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14843793106125086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14971223177565945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3713446075626833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4713943801875681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749897256041437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953085233875933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18897626879764012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797531819791126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19436498444040828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385714230100215,0.0,0.0,0.1036129822088823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3206767657964485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ash811,2020/02/11,"Out of options Looked into TMS as a center for it opened about half an hour away from me and the treatment was recommended. Sadly it's not something that is doable as treatments are five days a week for six weeks. The only transportation I have is my husband and he works during the time the center is open. So there goes that. 

I'd say I feel defeated but I honestly didn't hold much hope to begin with.",3.9855555555555564,5.309177370370372,4.534259259259262,86.5991666666667,71.5925925925926,7.375308641975309,24.61111111111111,7.793537801064563,1.1547925925925921,321,9,65,4,6,102,66,81,0.08800000000000001,0.845,0.067,-0.1677,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,7,0,7,0,0,0,0,13,11,6,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,7,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,3,2,3,5,2,12,9,1,14,0,2,1,0,3,7,0,2,6,45,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29705545302684416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20390577993614964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159866844144073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31403167012832145,0.31136725320272185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655061471921582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324239347367245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404642280574215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25143389300922303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434058415392087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18436333650527326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5072306925018512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301781061383692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xstellaforstarx,2020/02/11,"Urgent Care? Has anyone ever gone to urgent care for your mental health? Not the ER, but the Urgent Care clinics? I’m so tired of being depressed, but I can’t get into the doctor until March.",1.912105263157894,4.294683631578948,3.6413157894736834,85.87671052631579,81.10526315789474,3.8,14.76315789473684,3.1291,-0.8413368421052634,150,2,26,0,4,50,30,38,0.18899999999999997,0.534,0.27699999999999997,-0.1536,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,3,4,0,0,1,5,9,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,2,3,5,7,0,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,18,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376798142162614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7601350689988409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214046239918136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543663870877869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22479671169430412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12983921534858284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641606070566399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504454111294816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28563228126445944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lauralauraalaura,2020/02/11,"Situational depression I'm not sure why I'm posting I think I just want somewhere to vent.

I'm 25, I live with parents and commute 2 hours to work everyday - I really like my job but have been really low recently - I came off antidepressants about 6 months ago now and I feel like I'm going back to where I started.
I know in a few months I'll have saved enough money to move nearer to work but I just don't know how I'm going to cope with those few months if I feel so low now.. I find it so difficult to get out of these lows.

Wishing for instant gratification 🤷🏻‍♀️",1.3725856929955285,3.0748789262295126,3.82397913561848,87.40067809239945,79.40983606557377,7.387183308494784,22.566318926974677,8.296473431620573,1.1612852459016398,447,14,102,9,11,156,79,122,0.14,0.7240000000000001,0.136,-0.0991,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,10,9,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,1,23,21,8,0,3,6,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,6,0,1,4,2,5,0,0,2,2,12,4,15,19,3,24,0,4,0,0,1,8,0,1,13,53,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551978423508089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462570087609638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20024486018709992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15079613392126934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809044256008416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17705140124331595,0.1250771757590016,0.0,0.0,0.16001993379918644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147206563135933,0.0,0.1990039795830052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17241851734792035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17373986912249906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19243876125663836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107047338442666,0.0,0.15459883374157105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4192415192980146,0.1860823155976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194405603234178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676782283715485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.224321442230048,0.0,0.17287036267912484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19679723790509907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239225140117901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501081320627978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218418451274556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326671089988128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15798245387168228,0.0,0.2013333414721425,0.0,0.0,0.2549206275105036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway_no_032,2020/02/11,"I'm [F17] unstable and I'm unsure about what to do I started going to a therapist and taking medication for depression and anxiety a couple months ago but none of it is helping. I've tried taking supplements, eating healthy, exercise, and recently started light therapy. My therapist told me that I deserve answers but I'm not getting any. I never really had much hope in the first place that I'd get better but since I started treatment, I've actually gotten worse, and now I'm severely depressed. I barely scrape by every day and my suicidal thoughts are returning. I sleep to an unhealthy amount and my grades are dropping quickly. My therapist suggested that I admit myself to a hospital over spring break but the thought is weighing me down even more. I can't tell her that I hate myself and that I'm suicidal again, or I'll probably be admitted even earlier. I don't know what to if this goes on for much longer. I'm grateful for any and all advice.

Tl;dr: My mental health is dropping fast and at this rate I could be admitted to a hospital. My treatments aren't working. I need advice",4.116990962254121,6.295743540669857,5.5373763955342925,76.04302365762895,72.92344497607654,9.237745879851145,32.18527379053695,9.725611199111238,3.60996629452419,876,43,150,24,18,294,125,209,0.184,0.711,0.105,-0.9677,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,6,5,1,0,7,0,13,7,1,0,2,29,38,16,2,4,7,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,10,10,2,0,7,1,0,1,6,3,0,1,5,1,23,2,17,30,6,25,0,2,0,0,8,6,0,3,15,99,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.118951976164063,0.0,0.0,0.2382288460474952,0.1080525988654395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16578561528666028,0.0,0.09324937250341228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780625781450144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732327131893258,0.13487454406728835,0.0,0.07861221713423404,0.0,0.20997603990167948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472905777882512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16102104954176008,0.0,0.10270182909000078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368385935966196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737025547967495,0.0,0.06927576070904214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12034611669504308,0.0,0.1295687282079585,0.0,0.0,0.0817036763521858,0.0,0.0,0.12106927938425326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699032654469518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279642950882502,0.1228415310183191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729545854993144,0.0,0.17921376069317754,0.09038362816162196,0.09401296998812196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273543735073079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142347052941042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808908438112028,0.0,0.12035664717598545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770669996085108,0.0,0.10083283730570193,0.0,0.12198307185277885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588338116192174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666667803468665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18329980118112305,0.0,0.10654163832383934,0.0,0.13939760231250314,0.4245886119788167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19354209303457834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647593509768905,0.0,0.08275873124294747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874104140138839,0.0,0.12422146027036945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Itookthewrongpath,2020/02/11,"Borderline personality disorder. I'm looking for advice and information about BPD from anyone who has professional, or experiential knowledge of it. I have a very close friend, whom I have referred to on here before, who has had a lifetime diagnosis set of depression, anxiety, ocd, (defiant disorder as a child), and several other disorders, but not BPD. I've known her for years and she has opened up more and more to me over time. I'm the only person she trusts, and is afraid of pushing me away. She has no other friends and is determined that people stare at her, judge her, and don't like her simply for no reason. She hated herself and physically/mentally cannot say/think anything positive about herself. Recently, I started noticing some symptoms that I thought were more characteristic of anxiety and depression. But, in a moment of concern I googled disorders where severe low self-esteem and paranoia of others opinions of oneself would be present. I found BPD, which as a psych student, ive heard of, but never researched. For her self-esteem issues, she says she can't even bring herself to talk to her trusted therapist about it. And she believes she doesn't deserve help. I found that many people are misdiagnosed with anxiety and depression respectively when they may very well have BPD, due to similarities in symptoms. I'm worried this may be the case for her. Especially since it doesn't seem like she shares certain details that may help her psychologist to provide proper treatment. It's really just a strong hunch, but I have no idea how to introduce the idea to her. She's also very stubborn and refuses to talk about her emotions when things are ""seemingly"" okay. Any advise or knowledge is very appreciated. Very appreciated. Thank you.",7.316190476190478,8.77338656687898,7.452893539581439,68.26088110403397,63.90445859872611,10.56693964209888,36.92690324537458,10.608840637214634,4.340038095238096,1418,69,226,36,21,458,177,314,0.182,0.6809999999999999,0.138,-0.9009,0,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,0,1,1,1,14,20,2,1,9,1,27,2,0,2,2,48,41,25,0,1,8,0,0,2,2,4,2,2,0,3,17,16,0,2,13,0,0,2,10,7,1,0,6,4,37,13,37,29,4,24,0,4,2,0,43,11,0,9,12,163,54,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08198709572584098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709560721061121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05705556374044224,0.0,0.1925521285097687,0.0,0.0,0.058665536835696086,0.0,0.06904338222181143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788277605431829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139357972369789,0.0945277068772882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4226815389088145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21679145035341124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3846313042142178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437734323833318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055415825672192866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183986253302976,0.12964342406529394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283487708069237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247415659989878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18942805515727626,0.0,0.08757085604644152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197959075223464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045571720817795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850624551354352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647096310775906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09552185572973254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06381049866402824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633279212195895,0.14651825105885696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0537491352749261,0.08626421175004427,0.08284212526716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344290103828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527606564092032,0.17505410266731375,0.18956851916294068,0.0,0.06940378230134701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05938556656031005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744105485741799,0.0,0.13487290709911007,0.0,0.07724477735172783,0.0,0.09741553902745836,0.0557401027982319,0.053760379294451016,0.0,0.06660802993371355,0.04892335351832986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461355994764189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543708390083581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520554808624622,0.0,0.0596008701120466,0.0,0.0,0.054029499497388285
mentalhealth,HornyVVolf,2020/02/11,"I never used to have anger problems About a year ago, it was almost impossible for me to get angry. I could get mad sure. But its changed a lot more than I care to let on.
I have an extremely short temper now and I am extremely aggressive, I hit people, chew them out and I have no control when I do it. Something changed and I'm not sure if it's for the better or worse, I can stand up for myself now but at what cost? I dont want to be seen as an angry person",2.3392362093352195,2.8153954554455467,4.290608203677511,89.99990099009901,74.64356435643565,7.355586987270155,23.33946251768034,7.447530270364453,0.7075561527581327,355,9,85,4,7,122,70,101,0.212,0.7140000000000001,0.07400000000000001,-0.8974,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,2,4,9,4,0,5,0,11,1,0,2,3,19,19,9,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,4,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,2,1,13,4,14,13,2,12,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,4,6,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18223094106933999,0.0,0.2058549180497028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18181548635554493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20959868690001648,0.0,0.4349448262277047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23057124387307484,0.16413590701767386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409338328975309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21481021061981487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102156429255482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747735755117338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585530766825337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252068666478473,0.17950125127178093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19670870671336507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826264010685426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38750636377053616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775518742467186,0.0,0.0,0.121254198018319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20949976070698167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323843643407044
mentalhealth,Jbrahmz420,2020/02/11,"Using antidepressants for the first time. Hi everyone. I’ve been prescribed antidepressants today for the first time and I’m a little nervous about what’s to come in the coming weeks. Do you guys have any advice for first time users? I’m 22 and have a relatively busy job/social life, will the pills affect my work performance/social interactions? Should I expect major mood swings or dietary problems? Any advice would be appreciated!",4.562712842712845,7.849346454545457,4.91030303030303,75.09656565656567,77.96103896103895,7.058585858585857,22.841269841269842,8.167268648758528,1.8317226551226555,355,11,55,7,9,112,57,77,0.073,0.883,0.045,-0.2591,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,4,1,3,0,1,6,0,8,2,0,2,0,11,13,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,3,1,0,3,0,6,8,1,12,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,8,30,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773165174801509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625779877042915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33261217706724466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844793144510394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4926561167746639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911620439912163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915845565585154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136365621850249,0.0,0.1934991578341692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18473456078319386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33772856343236146,0.0,0.18300049940911967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667438521315431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15486294288466287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055166389236606,0.0,0.0,0.13714592857797905,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fakeDABOMB101,2020/02/11,what is the difference between a teen mental hospital and an adult mental hospital? I am 17... going back tonight and want to know...,4.783750000000001,6.967949875000006,5.8066666666666675,74.80500000000002,71.08333333333334,9.8,32.83333333333333,10.125756701596842,3.9359833333333367,103,5,17,3,2,34,21,24,0.0,0.9420000000000001,0.057999999999999996,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,12,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966658149938401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4030916982238711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192659997526975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21203232953694626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7776160329154806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22756206839764065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vahnikopa,2020/02/11,"Do the headaches ever go away from Buspar, and why does it wear off after 2.5 hours? I hate this drug, but I've been given a higher dose, and want to know if anyone with migraines takes it, and if the headaches ever go away? Also, I can FEEL it wear off after 2.5 hours, about its half-life, and it makes me more anxious than I was before I took it. As in, jumping outta my skin til the next dose kicks in. I'm now supposed to take 30mg 3x a day. That's not enough anxiety coverage for an entire day of hell. Any advice?",3.5544155844155867,3.697645454545455,4.591298701298701,90.13409090909094,71.72727272727272,7.012987012987013,22.98701298701298,6.1826913282559595,0.3423376623376617,400,8,91,2,7,131,81,110,0.11199999999999999,0.8590000000000001,0.028999999999999998,-0.9001,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,2,0,6,0,4,7,3,1,2,15,16,10,0,3,4,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,2,0,0,4,2,6,0,18,12,2,21,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,2,11,56,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17926220533125856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467024342078643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475019503961035,0.0,0.14033639030753695,0.2072428014779586,0.0,0.12827035055950195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3447088367063971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560998158851642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23661617210961955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605356343447389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127401845713248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895497049540036,0.0,0.0,0.3318764800943136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927562738056291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20851422229913485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811158525907929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613165237208327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081762869194297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12245224238789165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19509787866676945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27585850447311794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20381627600890048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820174530076186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16553231033363702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dont_say_choozday,2020/02/11,"I thought this might be useful for some. https://youtu.be/rZTFfyUnEnc 

Note: please do not take offense. This is not an attempt to negate any belief or religion. This is just a beautiful perspective on the balance of life that I believe could be appreciated and useful for a lot of people. Hope you guys take away something beautiful from it.",6.5830508474576295,9.297201542372887,5.412000000000003,77.27833898305086,67.47457627118644,8.787796610169492,32.13898305084746,9.3871,3.2650786440677964,277,12,44,6,5,82,47,59,0.0,0.6629999999999999,0.337,0.9714,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,1,2,1,0,4,0,7,1,0,2,0,14,13,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,8,8,2,2,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,5,0,35,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17151866087105572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23696956162484456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841662519112371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20137763025278466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24973805368386096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250511971580947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815087283663586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21442893944936306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675662045277325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17485801043804253,0.0,0.0,0.2768624846030835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941717446313308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3792770124495439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20023498758968164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4356752441608597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HeadCasePortland,2020/02/11,"How do I go about suing over a false mental health hold?  In LA County, California.

I was recently placed on a 5150 because I told my insurance I was suffering suicidal thoughts and couldn't keep myself safe. I was expecting to get referred to a specialist quick, but instead I had the police called on me. They handcuffed me and drove me to a hospital after I told I wouldn't come with them, they told me ""not to do anything stupid"" and checked me for weapons, and they told me I wasn't under arrested. Yeah seemed like it. They removed the handcuffs once I got to the hospital but I refused to tell the hospital anything. When a psychiatrist came to talk to me I just told her to fuck off and she put me on a 5150 hold. I asked for a lawyer and they wouldn't give me one. I tried to leave and they actually tackled me down and restrained me. They wouldn't let my boyfriend stay in my room with me, and they were watching me at all times, zero privacy. I had to stay restrained for four hours before they would release just one of the restraints to let me eat and pee, it was humiliating. I didn't get all the restraints off until the next morning. Then they shipped me off to a mental hospital, and again my boyfriend couldn't come with me.

It was a week of hell. I got dressed back in my clothes before the transfer, and when I got there, they made me strip search to my underwear while they checked for items. I refused at first and they told me they really didnt want to force me to take my clothes off but they will if they have to. This was the most frightening threat I've ever faced, so I just submitted. Then I got sent to a room with three other girls who were far more mentally ill than me. I had to spend seven days in this abusive hell hole. Group therapy that didn't help me at all, one on one therapy sessions from a guy who kept trying to psychoanalyze me, meds Ive never heard of that made me dizzy and woozy and sick, having a strict schedule like I was 11 years old and they wouldnt discharge me until I agreed to take the meds and do therapy, I refused the first two days. They told me they can't discharge me until they know I'm not a threat to myself, and they can't tell that if I don't talk to them. Then they'd happily let me go yet they waited a whole week to let me go. I felt like punching them in the face. I was afraid I'd lose my apartment and job, luckily did not. There were truly psychotic and delusional people in the hospital, a few threatened to attack me. Why was someone just wanting help for suicidal thoughts placed in such a situation? What can I do? This was false imprisonment and I was abused.",3.7701368806631934,4.974885390977448,4.413458646616544,87.71642664353193,71.96992481203006,7.937613263929053,27.36283015230384,8.384062270229773,1.6566817428185847,2076,73,444,33,39,662,225,532,0.20199999999999999,0.754,0.044000000000000004,-0.9983,1,0,0,0,1,0,49.0,0,0,26,3,18,15,8,1,29,1,46,8,3,3,5,76,86,37,2,12,12,0,1,3,0,6,3,1,2,2,13,28,1,11,6,0,3,10,17,11,0,11,43,3,98,4,65,30,8,68,2,2,1,1,54,27,3,4,32,319,111,4,0.0,0.16859909465723233,0.06943084493891648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709859699013632,0.0,0.06651440815726761,0.08094189086922576,0.0,0.054708940478768966,0.0,0.04337157281306751,0.0,0.12108456669881155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072650753600072,0.08137513168631995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12257656973175822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177002071194522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280285834070135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435805122811478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831388703739312,0.0,0.0,0.12103805576025373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.065775804944909,0.07434449383036991,0.06825229363142535,0.12130629742160055,0.0,0.22761638459261185,0.0,0.0,0.07044837570879879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562771605182644,0.0,0.0,0.09537891620941136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006711453785884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060408300016957,0.06324021275276115,0.0,0.0,0.03910145190288399,0.0,0.0,0.07533617535006172,0.0,0.2910173687448365,0.0,0.10427894843062456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959716987101649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464519600474534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580602805294151,0.0,0.2151033946782484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054874245489536656,0.0,0.0756674246163165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465856748563314,0.07577101842531885,0.1928487381402864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049325533827640086,0.0,0.14867044742633093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152407127354615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04557966402852855,0.0,0.07025073459829015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477108292342235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997409339280083,0.0,0.0,0.060284042707830325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167004502156614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556502083755797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698990032404077,0.11437322220504935,0.1243741585225623,0.0,0.2440941367212062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11296820350511247,0.04148736542659608,0.0,0.0,0.4758992658020509,0.0,0.09661056203632028,0.0,0.0695019186283444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393066559051016,0.0,0.11414235332418055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420061406781769,0.07943495644068295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050541978426624785,0.0,0.0,0.04581741496163811
mentalhealth,LordOfThunder72,2020/02/11,What to do when you feel dead inside? Feel like I should do a skydive or something to get some life back into me.,1.84,3.2930430000000044,2.8566666666666656,95.955,77.33333333333334,4.800000000000002,20.333333333333336,3.1291,-0.5127666666666664,88,2,20,0,2,28,21,24,0.16,0.746,0.09300000000000001,-0.4215,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,6,6,2,1,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,3,5,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,3,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3982750051071691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5237866713081195,0.3700267667319653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706098253855888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3658465498806666,0.2530463842248631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3987466450575469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SantaRosa_Rx,2020/02/11,"[Help] Psychiatrist thinks I’m on meth :/ Hello to all, I’m posting on a new account simply because my other account is linked to other online communities, and I feel this comment is just not as appropriate. 

Unfortunately, the case is when I need to see a psychiatrist once a month, I often get a new doctor as I am told in my community municipal mental health services building there are only “traveling psychiatrists”, and so I rely on the data that is in my file. 

I have never tested positive for methamphetamine or any other amphetamines, but often (inpatient and outpatient), I get doctors that seem convinced that I smoke methamphetamine, even though I don’t. 

I have overdosed on heroin, but they don’t ask me about that often; the doctors seem more focused on methamphetamine. 

So I get pee-tested every time, and I test positive for marijuana, which they also don’t care about. 

I feel that the treatment I get from the psychiatrists is very rude these days, and I don’t like getting lumped in with meth addicts. I was told another psychiatrist felt strongly that I was on meth and wrote that in her notes on my file. 

I was also asked if I abuse Valium, something nobody has even prescribed me. 

Anyone else feel the same/have similar experiences?",11.873903508771932,8.79430840789474,11.265438596491231,59.416403508771936,57.026315789473685,13.817543859649124,43.31578947368421,11.855464076750405,5.137531578947369,999,41,163,21,9,328,127,228,0.09699999999999999,0.8190000000000001,0.084,-0.6098,0,0,8,0,1,0,31.0,0,0,2,1,15,5,1,0,10,0,17,6,0,0,2,28,39,18,0,2,6,0,4,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,13,7,0,0,8,1,2,1,6,1,0,0,7,5,28,4,22,32,2,20,0,0,1,0,11,11,0,7,8,117,41,6,0.0,0.15461066526956185,0.0,0.14225460605947465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20870743831765276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873845133153521,0.1368313401803416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09124244059730068,0.13370359576839996,0.0,0.0,0.2439832056302249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795461890237138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330444161071055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415599136472987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4006896398392345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900860493203604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17237633727639728,0.0,0.10994441522087828,0.0,0.0,0.12764537621997069,0.0,0.0,0.1979407267342998,0.0,0.12529196011964433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34088117951080754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870598196701314,0.0,0.0,0.08746546188641889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06375138064747445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150437935054668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415678463277636,0.0,0.0,0.09675752838893042,0.1006428132790519,0.2520583162832516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13896880752186458,0.0,0.09924439369135878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497444300849027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398454547530456,0.2375884696505565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004584563768264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361345482954187,0.12820688453250825,0.0,0.07609043431612858,0.0,0.0,0.24937975662338416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766885833599472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saoirsesmiles,2020/02/11,I keep becoming extremely aware of like everything.. that I’m alive. I’ll be doing something and I suddenly become so aware that I’m like alive and talking and moving and everything just seems really strange. It’s hard to explain. It’s like things feel so real that they don’t feel real.. like I don’t understand how life is the way it is. I start questioning life itself. Am I nuts?,1.2719736842105256,3.9029033026315822,3.0555789473684243,86.69205263157896,88.34210526315788,7.2505263157894735,22.07368421052632,8.238735603445708,1.7712463157894731,305,11,59,8,10,101,47,76,0.096,0.695,0.209,0.8689,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,1,0,15,16,7,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,6,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,6,4,2,15,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,6,32,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084831068947367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33240778025092416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18701315098878987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16566168414382407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437500346281894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612442042509086,0.3613914156465713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19655218732425245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20716483372637395,0.0,0.0,0.4209835029183173,0.1184714140955572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835406644585066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14236877458562486,0.0,0.0,0.13089498112442774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864038226364054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228598147032671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19251949804684332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467894713696583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IamTheGreetest34,2020/02/11,"I need help I have been having panic attacks... or mental breakdowns... I don’t know what to call them... I don’t always have them... but when people around me argue or struggle or life seems like it proposes a challenge I just freeze up

I get the feeling of hopelessness. Like it’ll only get worse and never better. Like I’ll never make it in life. There’s been times where I couldn’t see myself being alive much longer because of it. Just writing that gives me a pain in my chest.
I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to see a doctor because I’m not ill. I’ll never be ill. I’m normal. I don’t know what to do. It usually passes in a day but im terrified that one day it won’t pass and I’ll do something stupid. I wouldn’t.

In these moments I feel like my life means nothing and even the thought of suicide doesn’t phase me. I could just do it. I wouldn’t. I’m not a suicidal person. I’ve never self harmed or ever thought about it... but I swear to god I could do it

I’m 19 and I feel so pressured to get a job and a car and be an adult and do everything for my parents because I feel like I’ll be homeless in a year if I don’t. I feel like I only have a year to live when I should feel like I have decades

I don’t have the money to see a therapist. I don’t believe in them. I don’t want pills because I don’t want to be looked at different or get hooked on them. I just want this feeling to go away. I try to stay happy for everyone else

But the truth is it’s fucking killing me slowly.. or so it seemed... it feels like it’s happening quicker now.. like each breakdown is a step closer to my end. They used to happen every 2 weeks but now it’s Atleast 3 a week.

I don’t know what this means. I don’t know if I’m getting sick. Is this a sign of depression? Bad anxiety? I always say I have anxiety but I never actually know if I really do. Am I sick!!! I don’t want to be fucking sick I’m normal

I don’t know why I’m 19 but I still feel like I’m 12. I don’t feel like I’m ready to go out and make something of myself but I know I have to and it’s fucking terrifying. I don’t think like any other 19 year old does

I don’t know what’s wrong with me or why this is happening but I’m so fucking scared because you see people go off the rails on the news all of the time and I don’t want to be on the news

I don’t smoke drink or do drugs so I don’t know why this is happening to me... I can’t stop this feeling and it’s scaring me now.. I don’t know where to go.. I feel like a stranger in my own home",-1.1231282792590207,0.7468156024735002,1.6393511082557026,98.58360959417496,89.97173144876325,4.702387835956741,17.939715172930722,6.1124844417494595,-0.41906619552414615,1925,53,486,18,66,666,199,566,0.175,0.667,0.158,-0.9802,3,0,5,0,0,2,62.0,0,1,5,2,21,36,8,5,23,0,62,18,1,3,8,102,135,37,3,18,26,1,13,13,0,5,12,1,1,3,31,15,1,1,30,1,1,8,34,19,0,1,4,19,70,17,45,116,4,54,0,2,5,4,16,19,4,13,39,292,101,3,0.0,0.0,0.05287159656036637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901637437125299,0.0,0.0,0.036844071236189116,0.0,0.08289468340917279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048231442456307005,0.0,0.061637259385737386,0.05090363558678907,0.0,0.04523780769677747,0.1651372889080129,0.0,0.0,0.061041997268212675,0.0,0.04791756432856287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05532355738330636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651620432118967,0.0,0.0,0.06988288153035048,0.0,0.046664918175520764,0.0,0.0,0.05660628157189755,0.0,0.0554552448321176,0.04741304288836036,0.0,0.0,0.0530755045447756,0.0628312806457508,0.0,0.04526020845764119,0.0,0.047987155390978566,0.0,0.0,0.035785197705991256,0.04900866355490701,0.04564875547900902,0.05177104952827955,0.048693243742915435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3287387655254187,0.30964805373413024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003531327057966,0.1415333519180887,0.05197412960155025,0.12316634627638963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19164380928345628,0.05767532525362984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036315527937370966,0.0,0.05434668221279662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05852340081841983,0.0,0.05376501748154936,0.0,0.059941838862207074,0.0,0.3275333622870248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480622719851133,0.34410320296970365,0.0,0.04784169022760199,0.0,0.04549732390033138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723307749561121,0.0,0.0,0.11803520878212286,0.0,0.0,0.05460042008802268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03982833223538472,0.040173579943156616,0.20893372186596373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616925507350816,0.051986907844395004,0.0,0.05685250789253729,0.0,0.036713584175373855,0.0824122453364785,0.0576510478776561,0.06356823419031339,0.06016017342010984,0.0,0.0,0.07512279958436552,0.047307646489766535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03470891950103081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0430858923258096,0.10848671389309544,0.0,0.17269690617615538,0.0986463744786069,0.05652126984672993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342039933054472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057748378532104835,0.043267998764336166,0.04529667651842858,0.0,0.05664041276333484,0.0,0.11852765192488575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290683719763761,0.0,0.034716180413537814,0.0,0.08602530021241138,0.06318526727183774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03678447715815949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04679388717876712,0.05967131317495231,0.0,0.191739635059109,0.0,0.08691941543727735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666632541665325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05521376897930655,0.0,0.05923702454918501,0.0,0.1046699005933959
mentalhealth,Im-Depressed666,2020/02/11,"I heard my parents having sex in their room and I don't actually know how to react **i need serious advice in this. thanks.** okay so i actually made an account on Reddit to say this. few minutes ago, i heard my parents having sex in their room. this happened around 02:24 am. our rooms are actually very closer so i can hear them talk a bit or sum) like usual, i would use my laptop, playing games, reading articles, watching YouTube (rarely) and most of the time, using Instagram. i usually use my earphones but it's lost now. i don't actually know how to write this or start.. just straight to the facts. i think this is actually very awkward.. like imagines your kids overhearing you have sex. it's the worst thought ever. i don't really wanna talk to my mom about this so i guess i'll keep quiet. this is the second time which this happened.",0.9415447154471543,3.5321651463414665,2.616463414634147,88.47477642276422,92.65853658536585,5.416260162601626,22.077235772357724,6.996647511020387,0.9903382113821136,660,25,128,11,24,216,102,164,0.062,0.8740000000000001,0.065,-0.3716,2,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,1,2,3,1,10,9,0,1,6,1,12,3,0,7,2,28,31,10,0,3,4,3,0,2,0,1,0,5,3,1,11,3,0,1,5,3,1,0,3,4,0,1,5,6,23,5,13,25,4,18,0,1,1,3,19,10,0,4,10,82,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.5872864243770105,0.0,0.0,0.11761769050875424,0.10669486372349794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714891633873444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131405624388395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887555759658264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325938201128487,0.0,0.2128738582341968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135658263862547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698449214347157,0.0,0.0,0.13229711893149115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760692396488427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313908348873043,0.0,0.0,0.11389072938797895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096812228354644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924791250554565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672985529949531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203959403770504,0.0,0.07710785583891444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571778153597807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851938116180408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19348703237696468,0.0,0.11081441823910836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712398637258988,0.0,0.09555506974339772,0.14036969603146102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118659144617547,0.2651264908362412,0.19862476870465806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550268347512263,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dlooooow,2020/02/11,"Found out my therapist has a suspended license. What do I do? So basically I found this guy online with little to no reviews but he instantly reached out to me when I sent out an email to his company saying I am in need of a therapist. He texted me right away saying he will call me as soon as possible and to hang in there. He called me and talked to me on the phone for 25 minutes and told me about his expertise and how he can help me and although he was very confident and cocky with his work and what he has accomplished, he seemed to care about helping me. The other doctor I reached out to told me he can't take any new clients for another couple of months so I told myself to give option A a shot. 

He eventually told me he's out of network because he doesn't like ""dealing with insurance companies."" But if I have a certain insurance company (which I do) then he can give me receipts for me to submit a claim for reimbursement. I thought it was a bit weird but I negotiated a price I felt comfortable with.  

Fast forward to my first appointment and I go to his office which is a small ranch styled office space with a few rooms inside but there is no secretary or clerk or anybody to assist me. There was a stack of papers for me to fill out that was very poorly printed out and very hard to read. After trying my best to fill it out (because it was so hard to read) he eventually came out of his office to greet me. He was wearing baggy cargo pants and a hoodie, not sure if it matters but he just did not look like a professional to me. He told me he is very casual and likes to feel comfortable. Without getting too into what we talked about, he was very focused on me going on adderall to assist with the ADHD he is almost certain I have. He has brought up adderall plenty of times and told me about tons of people who he sent over to a well known doctor claiming they have ADHD and his diagnoses was never reversed. Like I said, this guy loves to brag and talk about himself. To be honest, some of the things he said that is most common with people with ADHD sounded a lot like what I have experienced personally. 

All around he is a very nice guy who seems very intelligent and understanding of what I am going through but I still decided to do some research on him. He also told me if I see anything ""fishy"" online then I should confront him because ""there's a lot of BS"" out there..

I found the following disciplinary actions online:

* Practicing While Alcohol/Drug Impaired (9/18/2019) (suspension)
* Physical or Mental Condition (7/8/2019) (probation)
* Substandard Care, Incompetence or Negligence (9/18/2018) (suspension)

I looked him up on the LARA website and found out he is currently suspended. 

I already paid this guy $150 bucks to see me twice and I can't help but feel cheated and uneasy about everything. What actions can/should I take?",4.255235085945401,5.946388967391307,5.107091338051905,81.31175429727,71.46376811594203,8.468217054263567,29.141557128412533,9.037768484169169,2.46312052578362,2258,90,428,46,43,734,250,552,0.077,0.778,0.145,0.9933,1,0,2,0,0,0,65.0,1,0,1,4,23,21,2,0,24,0,37,5,1,1,5,88,79,44,0,5,18,0,5,5,0,2,3,5,1,5,21,41,0,0,13,3,5,14,9,3,1,2,29,15,61,18,83,47,10,58,0,0,4,1,72,30,0,16,21,294,82,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357987780659129,0.0,0.0,0.06989404608424916,0.06548990433212051,0.0,0.07217190529231111,0.052301355715153666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044475092465450686,0.06857891269654802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0538196559131696,0.058220978057369324,0.0,0.0,0.0614466269223351,0.0,0.0,0.11960398425997695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686345765697372,0.0,0.07140122584110517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335639763785625,0.07480160650627632,0.13336186556306545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236523878451136,0.0,0.0,0.06742581662845717,0.0,0.06638089170782513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13388190060712418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584468606980918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05877842608722765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613767382000721,0.0,0.06279545594817558,0.0,0.0,0.055630269540843526,0.0,0.2868363781399827,0.0,0.0,0.0341694536043528,0.12547767617872818,0.11150711204304337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590300780876902,0.0,0.0,0.11717334714106885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13151123712081578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597587351678834,0.06554923367265078,0.0,0.0,0.10984115595837143,0.0,0.0,0.11120360736081636,0.059027181243115935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590907710769131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05220265350518394,0.0,0.0,0.048494197918201386,0.050441475588139315,0.06316493445158643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068198344205992,0.05710584854934842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07373008226044926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308378963111292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05585230985353562,0.12442313030255528,0.10401939746900986,0.0,0.0,0.1042326568831731,0.1190776827618388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222952245159914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061639903801795376,0.0,0.09834720089958414,0.15770114133668273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15187178328576964,0.043449684193162884,0.0,0.0,0.051921286830500714,0.038135994613008234,0.0,0.0,0.4374558772374341,0.0,0.044403155460612916,0.0,0.0,0.0680850073831272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3777401623312759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05880357780840724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06304447081220083,0.0,0.04761288866929467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lascovery,2020/02/11,"I m getting overwhelm by fear every night. Hi beautiful people of reddit.

So a bit of context to introduce my case. 
I m afraid of losing consciousness and by that I mean death, probably the thing I fear the most (and also seems pretty common) 

During the day I can think about it and try to rationalize pretty much without being scared.
I m trying really hard to evade similar subject and death related location. (Church, cemetery, hospital)
 
Also never really had to experience the lose of a close relative (Family pretty healthy and grand grand parent passing away after 100yo when I was super young) 

But during the night and especially when it's time to try to sleep, I became overwhelm by the idea of one day losing consciousness. 
My breath stay normal, I m not hot or sweaty. 
But I can't get that out of my mind and I m terrified by it. I usually have to get up and go talk to the nearest (most reachable) person either irl or online.
This is the only way for me to get back to normal asap.

Problem is that only happen when I try to got to sleep, creating two problem for me:
me:
-I m now afraid of going to bed 
-I only go to bed when I m totally exhausted and know I m gonna sleep in a sec (making me go to bed around 3 to 4 am, and yes I work on the morning) 

Recently (2 weeks ago) it became a 100% happening event every night. 

The only thing preventing the effect is to sleep next to someone but partner and me aren't living together also open relation so it's not a routine,
And anyway it would not be a viable option since we can't know if relation are gonna survive time. 


Maybe useful information 
I m 25 (male)
Originally from France (living in Canada now)
I dont think I m depressed or anything and never been diagnose with any mental illness.

I know I should probably consult I guess..

Now i realise that I m not asking anything in particular. 
I guess I just wanted to tell everything since close friends are all having hard time in life and I m usually the support guy who always smile.

Anyway thanks for reading this and I apologize if there is any huge and unforgettable English mistake. 

(•﹏•๑)",2.9897925470610858,5.19762950121655,4.935700473812268,78.94018536304267,76.37226277372262,7.829965424510182,25.90094762453579,8.6894789155246,2.221842822384428,1659,62,297,36,38,568,216,411,0.09,0.7879999999999999,0.121,0.9479,1,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,1,0,0,7,19,21,0,7,18,1,21,9,5,4,4,72,49,33,2,10,15,1,3,0,2,4,4,0,3,4,15,23,0,1,12,1,1,5,11,15,0,2,4,3,39,6,47,39,7,50,1,6,0,0,15,14,0,11,29,195,54,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665894856625584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18022068445860764,0.06250598741026088,0.0,0.0,0.1021685639041162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363497521075907,0.0668728650967427,0.0702272052360695,0.0,0.0705778592173115,0.05776276295154286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201175422902253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689257196452927,0.0,0.06470088015155491,0.07624537691216265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804026318039296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658394240426796,0.0,0.06751315229463946,0.07348192684066197,0.0708165974046097,0.16906211993611756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05803764605946193,0.0,0.1569887238281507,0.0,0.17077006283735255,0.0,0.06008045098320141,0.0,0.165506641561113,0.07438076465706286,0.13285701144485054,0.0,0.1345858090631422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480151228814505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238522192659139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05305958763771882,0.0,0.0,0.1326649477460205,0.0,0.0,0.2521207181844881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05014328734170413,0.0,0.07546829337788931,0.08182787193958972,0.0,0.0,0.07570344863891497,0.0,0.07584994305055386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0552219579793398,0.0,0.1158745903911974,0.0,0.07989113795691584,0.2114855324347157,0.14720360641057215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509033617230462,0.22852905424500006,0.0,0.0,0.08341204319079143,0.0,0.0,0.052078857550713696,0.06559202256122575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22927261402265275,0.16198446679547612,0.14375968788314472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514048442242104,0.0,0.09624779078704987,0.0,0.07417209133025589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520838081438319,0.0,0.0,0.06838656856226796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428033836455399,0.0,0.3006976268782189,0.0,0.06364906427029829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800680910721568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524546263469858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037873576438764,0.06565832726027998,0.06916054678752755,0.0,0.0,0.09981298722540707,0.09626792528843864,0.0,0.0,0.1314095009142331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20400661919910254,0.0,0.07338147687148946,0.0,0.0,0.06487969559468762,0.16546847752724697,0.0,0.044307814211383384,0.059626883151462015,0.06025685783802121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241314956209678,0.0,0.054688368129277,0.0,0.0,0.05336320340716665,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lucky3six,2020/02/11,"Reuniting with your child that passed via VR.. WOULD YOU? Imagine losing your only child but you're given a chance to see her again.. would this be helpful or harmful? 

[Mother reunites with deceased child in VR](https://futurism.com/watch-mother-reunion-deceased-child-vr)",6.000757575757575,9.831087863636368,4.433636363636363,76.33712121212123,79.45454545454545,4.751515151515153,27.787878787878785,6.42735559955562,1.6540878787878794,222,9,30,2,6,64,34,44,0.044000000000000004,0.7979999999999999,0.159,0.6966,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,3,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,5,2,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,4,1,0,3,0,1,1,0,9,1,0,1,1,17,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017926482371983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5037138529613505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3424349194394514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35879043770997704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6396884394462582,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PathOfExalted,2020/02/11,"I was seeking help, I got completely shut out.. I'm unsure if this is even the correct sub to post in, but I'm going to anyway.   


Today I finally had a major breakdown and called the suicide hotline, to which they were really helpful in finding something in my state that might be able to offer me some help, problem is, I'm completely poor, I have no money, if not for family I'd be homeless.   


So I end up calling the first number they gave me, to which I was told If I don't have money, their mental health services are not free, and that I would absolutely have to make payments, alright, so I called the second number, which this rude lady with a 'I don't care' attitude redirected me to the first number and hung up the phone.   


Not wanting to completely give up, I started searching online, and I found a few numbers to call and ask about help, they all redirected me to the first number I called, but with some new information, well.. After my second call, they told me once again, non of their mental health services are free and that no matter what I'd have to find a way to pay via a payment plan.   


So I called my states hotline regarding mental health, was greeted with even them telling me to call the original number... Once I told them what they said, she said 'Of course, it's not free!' and I finally just said 'Thanks, have a good one' and she hung up before I could get the phone away from my face..   


I thought that maybe if I looked for help, it might be possible to get some, but no.. It's just not.. If anyone can provide any possible leads, please let me know.. I don't know what to do or where to go.",9.22063110264349,5.763218012383902,8.859133126934989,75.80067396999287,62.37461300309597,11.919885687068353,36.9204572517266,9.466822959209583,3.1716298642533927,1250,39,260,16,13,404,153,323,0.113,0.772,0.114,-0.7376,0,0,1,0,0,1,48.0,0,0,9,5,12,10,1,0,15,1,27,4,1,3,2,50,54,20,1,9,16,0,0,0,0,3,3,3,0,0,15,12,0,0,7,0,7,3,11,2,1,6,15,4,42,11,35,31,6,30,0,0,1,0,38,11,0,11,12,181,57,4,0.07359034804560857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05004396019157553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051456082414307734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879704145587733,0.0,0.06914055443497256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626199660015684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6011517859898469,0.0,0.07503026437209527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23147423943257425,0.0,0.0,0.058755904813298475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517920559588711,0.0,0.0,0.09721146167404478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937443076414505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122925843233893,0.13452048982424453,0.1877877373618438,0.0,0.08068801824461559,0.0,0.0,0.07689583904845022,0.07059456747051923,0.08364618136911113,0.061724092470241985,0.05885692393830552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346692961979995,0.0,0.0,0.2466302953850517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088666146400271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525111677525792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179735815555069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049122128758861364,0.0,0.07393139582687387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22248528658617345,0.15613545978024154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710740167129327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567426378788618,0.04986672436888121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078010338731327,0.0,0.16592412053689576,0.0704792111766169,0.0,0.0,0.07041602448605595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047143861346573765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21000381903452867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665344522462326,0.0,0.0,0.052087627114124464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049589656508635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432120781775047,0.06775210530532251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05842251622656906,0.0,0.0,0.06975504525369439,0.2109561936079856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04340549393747252,0.058412592929854665,0.0,0.0,0.06616656073851124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05227647184136657,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,temp089192876,2020/02/11,"Feeling Disconnected from Therapist Hey everyone,

I am kinda new to the whole therapy thing, and I just started therapy around a month ago. I just had my third session today, and I cannot explain it, but I feel disconnected from my therapist. I was wondering if anyone had any advise or felt the same way.

A couple of things happened that have made me feel like we are not properly connected or like I am perhaps not doing things right. For one, there were multiple times where she would ask me how I felt or for increased details about something in the past, and I would say that I don't know. These were not far-off events either, she asked me about why I had felt anxious during the class that I had had right before therapy. And, it isn't like I am lying or trying to hide something, I literally simply cannot remember, but she seemed a little annoyed. I don't blame her, it hurts all parties involved if we aren't able to move forward. She told me to try to log how I am feeling more in hopes that that would give her more to work with in order to help me.

There was also another point where I explained how I didn't like a certain thing I'd been doing. We talked about it, and she ended up talking through the logic of it. The issue was, the logic seemed to obviously point to the fact that I should not care about this one thing, and she pointed it out. It kind of seemed like she was confused why I even cared about it or brought it up in the first place.

The final issue I have is that I do not feel like this is helping me directly fix my problems. So far, we've talked about things like noticing negative thoughts or healthy sleep habits, but I feel like this is not directly addressing what I am feeling. I am paranoid that I have a certain condition wrong with me, but she is not confident that that is my problem yet, but she hasn't really mentioned much about why or what she is looking at. I feel left in the dark on her thought processes, and I want to make sure that I am actually able to get better.

Now, most of these concerns may be me overthinking things, but I just want to know how to address these concerns or if I should just ignore them. Hopefully, this stream of consciousness was coherent. Thank you for reading all the way through.",7.546363636363638,6.259137757847537,7.317708927843459,78.70616388096211,63.798206278026896,10.709987770077458,35.519364044027725,9.688023934748609,3.1181426008968613,1784,68,359,29,22,567,203,446,0.099,0.741,0.159,0.9776,1,0,2,0,0,0,43.0,3,1,1,3,25,25,1,1,17,0,48,1,1,6,7,98,87,30,0,14,29,0,11,8,0,6,0,1,2,0,36,14,0,1,25,1,0,4,16,7,0,4,22,13,61,18,45,58,10,42,0,1,1,0,34,23,0,21,22,269,97,5,0.14154350139470825,0.0,0.06906301973284573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273488687011504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05659614346354482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04812721734094101,0.07421035130879387,0.0,0.07995193391006948,0.0,0.0494852536127556,0.0,0.0,0.06300186260311526,0.1323240668358663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602215472577079,0.0,0.0,0.06259186228649248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431303305176765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783075960464106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626827649493496,0.0,0.0,0.046744073871325016,0.0,0.0,0.06762544064806897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862745888460962,0.15167805851716265,0.20385593748606776,0.07752699359310666,0.0,0.060198414989403815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03697531874307759,0.0678907120607003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625832254143743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487362537591512,0.0,0.0,0.14058463424977027,0.0,0.0,0.07576262285768105,0.0,0.0,0.1477346412999155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369788770087847,0.07778860668417892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689371420802306,0.0,0.0,0.2766040205721479,0.07093188660476514,0.0,0.0,0.05943044626489875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696594169918024,0.047240693142134416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05648933620474182,0.07521917083845098,0.05202537986455784,0.0,0.0,0.06835179783019678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057410724094298,0.0,0.0,0.09591353971966254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755964403113464,0.0,0.0,0.07394141647944008,0.0,0.20070653958121865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354380149673261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079090253818779,0.0,0.045338195710972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017059741181892,0.12087737681052853,0.0,0.05628053672461361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932838315014136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082286120931856,0.0,0.0,0.10896710256345922,0.0,0.0,0.05009260940378902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670153748298993,0.0,0.0,0.1706509572727895,0.0,0.06515711955754637,0.2428009942249694,0.16434291458367314,0.32912324518016856,0.0,0.0,0.11236972954486804,0.04126757696297021,0.0,0.0670833445374866,0.06762544064806897,0.0,0.09609874628755782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348602438826573,0.11235064309943547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19158149148814171,0.07901413224867257,0.0,0.0,0.0767489447105164,0.05152267739515652,0.0,0.0,0.1508226634640257,0.07737779945200661,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,duggancm19,2020/02/11,"Struggling to build my support system I \[25/M\] have been struggling with anxiety and depression for many years, and lately, I've felt very alone in my battle. I know that I need to get some more assistance in dealing with my mental health, and I've been seeing a therapist whom I like for a few years. Still, it's been a slow process in getting the help that I want mostly because of my inability to find a more extensive support system outside of therapy. I don't have supportive family members, and no friends close by anymore. Any advice on how to build a support system from scratch or how to find a person to reach out to? Everyone I used to have, I drove away from wanting to help.  
Feeling so alone.",6.419434306569342,6.548817686131388,6.678531021897813,77.68232208029198,65.56934306569343,9.769708029197082,35.37317518248175,9.516144504307137,3.2851613138686133,561,25,104,10,8,181,85,137,0.171,0.6709999999999999,0.158,-0.4541,0,2,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,4,10,1,2,7,0,7,1,0,3,0,22,22,8,0,3,1,0,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,5,4,12,6,24,17,5,16,0,1,1,0,6,7,0,3,6,69,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634157044954286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26781275918109204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792224510496315,0.0,0.0989071840877466,0.0,0.12822183061496495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147305589832295,0.0,0.0,0.07881453218491384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332932400447442,0.11135806212428656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354299493090952,0.0,0.0,0.12188395327453053,0.0,0.06537336344822653,0.0,0.12413953885857222,0.0,0.2363390793352513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998898280873169,0.0,0.1350983172092717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374301800519978,0.0,0.0,0.1733219289452184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105489701190178,0.0,0.14584576593737847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316500266750914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13108067889173214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302948169608854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586756359966772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11289182629542707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030281074012715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032518792011946,0.0,0.0,0.2703258400462967,0.0,0.0,0.5868711214841289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478554111751124,0.15011669919463508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116658251899282,0.0,0.106678532369482,0.15251824445000228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665182003745823
mentalhealth,Conrad2105,2020/02/11,Hiw to not be anxious about COVID-19 I've lost countless hours of sleep over fears of coronavirus. (UK farther works in London),5.412608695652175,7.95789569565218,3.77326086956522,88.49293478260874,70.30434782608695,6.339130434782609,33.23913043478261,7.1686216300943375,2.149539130434784,103,5,18,1,2,29,22,23,0.19699999999999998,0.735,0.067,-0.5204,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,8,0,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4524144385951108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4506374256318058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3943799520864974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43715772988108187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.400756847604882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29154520758516683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,New-Vlad,2020/02/11,"[18M] Have mental issues and got no real chance for therapy now. Hello. 

I want to ask maybe there is therapist or just a person here who wants to obtain an experience or just interested (being interested is a crucial point)  in talking about my current mental state?

I know it doesn't substitute a real therapy, but since I live in a rural area and still have parents as my money givers I choose to try the easiest way first.

DISCLAIMER: since I have some problems, which includes communication skills, I can be not that warm in talking, but that's exactly why I seek for help, because I crave for being more social human being.",8.281129943502826,7.509722423728813,8.780000000000005,67.14282485875707,62.050847457627114,11.256497175141243,35.76836158192091,10.504223727775694,3.8136903954802257,498,19,84,10,6,167,85,118,0.061,0.7929999999999999,0.146,0.8402,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,7,5,0,0,6,0,11,0,0,0,1,18,16,7,0,3,7,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,1,1,10,4,11,11,2,11,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,3,4,60,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344505069089018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100055813066986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605565528491011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13961404089881846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312745938793799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110016934962355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713153930734659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902048809505924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14493513990313925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16489672433920888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.330821067841875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822536601395027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433172684715626,0.0,0.0,0.1551616213964268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570560334871893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3736455193621196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715500745918236,0.0,0.0,0.16731603357515473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107926213317336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638526804213422,0.0,0.0,0.3754077572082863,0.1905746056781952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143760426979596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19362339067357096,0.1302835571622123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14810725605090086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pancakebaptist,2020/02/11,I need to vent to someone Been building up anxiety over a situation over the past few days and im struggling to cope.,3.017500000000002,4.763005750000001,4.823333333333334,81.855,74.83333333333334,8.133333333333335,32.83333333333333,8.841846274778883,2.8572333333333333,94,5,19,2,2,32,20,24,0.191,0.809,0.0,-0.5423,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,12,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954719449577958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24909234314951256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4172046349464602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2863914864872619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687090379224703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4341490643660214,0.0,0.0,0.3272592364287034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4037810926856862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bismothe-the-Shade,2020/02/11,"I'm sorry if this doesn't go here but I don't know who to go to I do t know what's wrong. I'm autistic, I have attention issues, I have severe depression and anxiety. I am on generic cymbaltw 60 mil and everything was GETTING BETTER IT WAS GETTING BETTER but today I've been struggling and I had to call in to work screaming and crying because I can't go and I'm letting my family down. My spouse and kid. Because I'm breaking at the seams, I feel some of the worst I've felt in years now and I'm self harming and I feel fully suicidal and I'm using grounding techniques, all of the ones I know, and even self harm isn't helping calm me it just makes me feel like I m failing more l.

I know you're not qualified to help. The suicide hotline is trite, and I've had awful experiences. I feel like no matter what I'm getting worse and I can't stop it what can I do? I've tried with my whole being what do I do?",-0.4854545454545445,1.6665273838383854,2.1594060606060634,93.6871090909091,90.8181818181818,4.784161616161616,21.05131313131313,6.360717304075467,0.30826440404040456,714,26,159,8,25,246,107,198,0.34299999999999997,0.573,0.084,-0.9965,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,4,4,14,0,1,4,1,21,0,0,2,1,34,45,15,2,1,5,1,5,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,9,13,0,1,10,0,0,3,7,9,0,1,6,6,21,5,13,37,5,14,0,2,0,0,8,6,0,2,6,95,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380200749438817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542997833741105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24001246724085634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385540322235604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904841703173294,0.0,0.0,0.11686906776085015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962155852939603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194886919295167,0.13273025447294126,0.12791587535263654,0.0,0.2744345185913289,0.19387304633083494,0.13028308774330802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21267630857322206,0.0,0.23134621196629385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18189946800378332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416244638681553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982853478307107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387515885542303,0.0,0.13258195834306688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905737175810052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919466383846833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831072408956628,0.1532903816681518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518931565284916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344240093729605,0.0,0.1418520056617849,0.0,0.29684432601470745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861767045302624,0.0,0.0,0.09212418496855987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171920617308118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15149235168220734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878348773091908,0.0,0.13827907474097895,0.0,0.14835504071710695,0.0,0.0873795146563869
mentalhealth,anonymoustraw,2020/02/11,"Failed in my first math test in university and feel like a failure I am W26 and have already completed a apprenticeship and a bachelor degree. But when I started to work in my field I was very unhappy with my choice. So I decided this year to study a different subject area. I live in a healthy long-term relationship with m boyfriend of 7 years. He works as an engineer and supports my decision. 
When in visited school a almost didn't get my degree because I failed math. I hated math in school because I always had old grumpy teachers and I just didn't get along with them.
Now in university I have maths again. And with the help of my boyfriend it really clicked and I'm not that bad in maths. It was one of my favourite courses. Yesterday I had my math exam. And I immediately had a blackout. My heart was racing so fast I thought I get a panic attack. I nearly cried but managed somehow to keep my cool. But I struggled to concentrate and I don't know how much time past while I had the blackout. In the end I didn't know what to do. I finished but I know for sure that I failed big time.
Now I feel so terrible like a failure. I am really disappointed in myself and fear that I will never pass my exam in maths and that I get a blackout again. I can write my exam again in 6 months but I also have to write 6other exams and I don't know if I can handle that. But when I fail university I have nothing. And im afraid I can't support myself. I have plans with my boyfriend and don't want to struggle my whole life. I sometime think about ending everything and the. I think maybe there is still hope. But right now I feel so hopeless.

And I know this maybe sounds stupid a d not like a big problem. But for me getting my degree is a life decision.",2.1198472116119187,4.110722288515412,3.6022001527883925,88.50496562261274,78.21568627450979,6.792258721670487,25.10389610389611,7.793537801064563,1.31363193277311,1375,51,291,22,33,453,163,357,0.17600000000000002,0.737,0.087,-0.9879,2,0,0,0,0,1,29.0,0,0,1,8,20,25,3,5,18,1,27,3,1,1,2,59,51,36,0,4,12,0,3,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,10,22,0,1,14,0,0,2,10,17,0,2,11,6,57,8,33,39,2,45,0,6,1,0,7,17,0,4,29,197,67,21,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775596762918667,0.0,0.11875041763651925,0.08605575547681049,0.0895402209447734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224220201287464,0.0,0.0,0.089849935893106,0.1311962323320389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128271390540138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820463827743667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11242964744165554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19062121066839768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671301620215332,0.0,0.0,0.12109127620937912,0.16323269468549956,0.07687667460568205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153309330619946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28110917049330314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624269193409064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275184827478895,0.07212877951487287,0.0,0.0,0.10688110680710787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116237370454098,0.0,0.0,0.09564879835922203,0.0,0.0,0.2956984745792523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15201638745858767,0.1577185729995356,0.0,0.09502168692127147,0.09523154931410516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21621761189142968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589335254996408,0.0,0.07910580287323618,0.0,0.08299554055048586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325479007313704,0.0,0.11291869455182865,0.0,0.0729193865156838,0.0,0.0,0.12625726262248724,0.0,0.0,0.10272601366537593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296832950994507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787556695895098,0.0,0.0,0.1155329719339315,0.0,0.09189843463614683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21781432583999755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642913724937304,0.0,0.07616698033187592,0.0,0.08593756225449295,0.0,0.0,0.22499487551901085,0.0,0.0,0.24422932506454034,0.10142124265517884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379044097590996,0.0,0.085430396639457,0.1254966255618927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878959964356979,0.0634712231330333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12014283002134173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15668286409953472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385947483174837
mentalhealth,reneethefool,2020/02/11,I just wrote a bleeding personal thing and Nobody has answered me >( I am such a loser haha ...Really tired tho,2.6959090909090904,4.7615813181818245,5.327272727272729,76.46090909090911,76.72727272727272,8.036363636363637,24.63636363636364,8.841846274778883,2.2623818181818187,87,3,15,2,2,31,20,22,0.259,0.617,0.12300000000000001,-0.5106,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,1,2,2,0,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5096549568705562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3739262927642792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38777721522462827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6708649520354051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_mausmaus,2020/02/11,"Finding help is so DIFFICULT I was just told “we have taken in 500 new patients recently, so we are no longer taking new patients.” by the Adult Psychiatric Outpatient Center at the University of Connecticut. 

Every referral (5 thus far) I am given has been a dead in, so my list is options is narrowing. 

F*ck this country’s health care system.

The Mental Health Care industry is so damn fragmented that it’s nearly impossible to find a provider who might have the most appropriate course of treatment.",4.660333333333334,7.569134144444442,5.4855555555555595,73.54500000000002,74.22222222222223,9.333333333333334,31.11111111111111,9.725611199111238,3.789777777777777,403,19,64,12,9,131,70,90,0.138,0.7709999999999999,0.091,-0.6889,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,6,0,12,2,0,1,0,9,18,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,5,2,8,12,1,11,0,0,0,0,6,7,1,3,3,42,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4397345295851174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18169253968818652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3941962940385401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4584469721886271,0.0,0.0,0.14454414872476304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21732222247321775,0.22876819618256403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4165479032566209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21292614832201556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16214027878584514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20606067728267904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowAwayBlue25,2020/02/11,"I feel like I'm beginning to lose it. I have been in a terrible mental state for the past couple months. I fell depressed, I feel overworked, and I feel like I have nothing good going on in my life. And worst of all, i feel like I can't tell anyone about this. But ever since then it has been wearing on me. 

And it's really starting to scare me. 

I was in my college class today. It was a two hour class, and thirty minutes in I was overcome with this overwhelming sense of fear, accompanied by this idea that ""if I don't get out of here RIGHT FUCKING NOW, then something terrible is going to happen."" I picked up my bags and ran all the way to the train station. Even now I still feel my heart beating rapidly. 

I feel like I'm on the verge of breaking down and it's terrifying me. Please, I need help. It's become too much!",1.2740588235294121,3.341790288235295,2.8864705882352943,92.17911764705885,81.41176470588233,5.647058823529411,21.764705882352942,6.794906146795322,0.4459411764705883,639,20,139,7,17,210,100,170,0.182,0.733,0.085,-0.9605,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,8,14,1,3,6,0,11,4,2,1,3,22,28,10,0,2,2,0,6,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,10,8,0,0,7,0,0,4,2,9,0,1,6,6,22,5,22,22,4,31,0,3,0,1,2,12,1,1,16,93,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098179091092289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155073636914107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15536282112691788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12093634923395175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927405712124014,0.12701037702182438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15800214410479851,0.4259780977734089,0.40124044603648695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12980830875931407,0.07335929235507227,0.0,0.15959835406895645,0.11777063104865765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241655592368896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663884824561517,0.09411496989515968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382771924330296,0.0,0.0,0.15850766298114874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917690154653053,0.2743921607915758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708472152698752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14150191900581632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207524019961168,0.0,0.1032187194351722,0.104113460045287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347287660296612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403880876111424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15412982793851998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995129905770885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199107827328458,0.0,0.0,0.14057655763234156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614996865701982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809574880993444,0.0,0.0,0.09938408925194132,0.0,0.11213292584241323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122725971842525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309382721691482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716178038762478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145223291624644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,windtrainexpress,2020/02/11,"Delusional Disorder, Somatic Type My relative has delusional disorder. She has been suffering for many years. Is there a video or patient-friendly reading I can give her to try to provide some education? 

Something related to somatic delusions would be the most helpful. 

Thanks!",6.0793333333333335,9.914807044444442,6.477222222222222,61.982500000000016,78.55555555555556,11.888888888888893,45.27777777777778,10.504223727775694,7.544111111111113,227,17,28,10,6,73,39,45,0.16899999999999998,0.711,0.12,-0.3655,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,9,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,4,6,2,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,21,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6597865667793029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223869683314032,0.0,0.0,0.2761254583256785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929352520748408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918278601908591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879211281679981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22159578405109773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650073766338244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954266611569053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044755745953805,0.0,0.0,0.1853616051923429
mentalhealth,ThotFeline,2020/02/11,"Just a vent I'm not really sure what happened but life has just gone downhill the last few months

My mum has been ill for a few years now but recently it's just gotten worse and worse so quickly, stress seems to make it even harder for her to do anything

My dad's house burnt down and he lost everything, I really struggle to keep connecting with him I hate it but I just don't want to hang out with him and I don't know why

My workplace just seems to be getting worse and worse lack of funding and people pulling out, people getting fired and people leaving. Our building is in an absolute state I'm not even sure if me depo will last till my apprenticeship finishes 

My little sister lied to my immediate family when she was given an option of not doing something and then cost us almost £40 pounds worth of fuel in my immediate family then tried to guilt trip us into not getting in trouble and just upset everyone
And now is refusing to interact with anyone to a meaningful manner after being punished

My mum keeps having breakdowns on top of it all

I just don't know what I'm supposed to do our house is falling down and the council just keeps doing bodge after bodge not doing anything properly costing us a fortune in heating and not taking any responsibility, bit even for all the damaged items due to mold and wet that they have refused to even attempt to fix.

My grandparents seem to be turning a blind eye to us whilst showering my mum's siblings with money and help to the point they where talking to here about the fact they have to be fair when buying presents for people and give equal gifts to there children but gave my mum a chocolate bar and her siblings a car and lots of money towards a house 

My mental stability has always been questionable but I just don't know what to think anymore, I've always been great full for what I have and try to have a positive outlook but it just doesn't seem to help anymore

Every little win there's one big failure or another problem uncovered",8.254462943071964,6.944505928571433,8.109377013963481,73.6694575725027,62.41836734693877,10.803651987110634,36.19280343716434,9.682069395223575,3.3577632653061222,1612,61,296,25,19,520,203,392,0.19699999999999998,0.7240000000000001,0.079,-0.9947,3,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,6,0,3,4,25,14,2,4,16,0,30,5,1,1,5,75,59,31,0,4,24,6,2,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,10,24,1,5,10,1,7,6,11,10,0,1,9,4,34,4,51,45,10,44,0,2,2,0,31,18,0,10,19,208,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216579630300308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365519463458726,0.0,0.0,0.0557999194737123,0.0860413681890554,0.0,0.0,0.16275216390449387,0.05737446125685361,0.0,0.13504783462297118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958233544658784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167850710682452,0.0,0.06913451185877555,0.07840665534025196,0.07374535409918945,0.0,0.15470748659198189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861037406935813,0.07871421776088071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046545002694502,0.0,0.0,0.07256058279431353,0.0,0.0,0.08101189731022129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099988935294571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28403986110931595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188016085472603,0.0,0.0,0.13528513267866588,0.13377084790647378,0.0,0.08688393893104704,0.0,0.0,0.057957567462173336,0.0,0.1644804657051048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957225309239666,0.06975985874273542,0.0,0.0,0.05477206077674117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269170430736737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654951727006792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05560229833029477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275452210791567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756808839331683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851513910848175,0.0,0.0,0.09191989434494396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10513251376382944,0.0,0.08101898598299409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987975849353653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316961466160144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399322950545616,0.08578124960434784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467091703876465,0.0,0.061694822724931125,0.06595235295152557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05257725344987267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114193298644926,0.08925180656220795,0.0,0.0,0.3948061649643267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048397909700907335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404148413540909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3344824564185843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05284045101849129
mentalhealth,Elli0t456,2020/02/11,"Things are bad and I took my first overdose yesterday and I feel super tired today I took an OD of my antidepressants, they’re SSRI’s and I know they don’t usually kill you unless you mix them with alcohol, I didn’t drink alcohol, I just took what was left in the blister pack that’s supposed to last me 2 weeks, I’m prescribed 100mg daily, I didn’t feel guilty about it, I went to sleep thinking “if these do something bad to me or make me ill, so be it. I don’t care anymore. I don’t want to be here anymore, I’ve had these thoughts for years and I’ve had therapy counselling for my mental health and they’ve never gone away and I’ve improved with therapy with social anxiety cos before I wouldn’t leave the house and then I only left the house to go to therapy.
I’ve done 5 years of CBT and a year of DBT, still have these thoughts but last night was the first time I’ve acted on it, before instead of OD’ing, I’d hurt myself physically cos seeing the blood would calm me down but that hasn’t been helping lately so I took too many pills, I’ve felt ill and really tired all day but I have to deal with it, I did it to myself. I don’t deserve help.",2.4732051557465127,3.696120032653063,3.791600429645545,90.84561761546725,75.20408163265307,6.953813104189044,23.098818474758325,7.475848149327749,0.7371224489795916,908,25,205,11,19,298,133,245,0.12,0.807,0.07400000000000001,-0.8641,0,0,4,0,0,2,18.0,0,2,2,3,8,7,1,0,7,0,22,11,2,3,2,35,41,18,2,4,7,0,3,0,0,2,8,0,0,0,12,13,3,0,7,1,0,8,9,4,0,2,18,4,29,3,24,19,1,32,0,1,1,0,8,6,0,2,18,120,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20997623989199127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515292783757409,0.0,0.19485431866828207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922992185889887,0.0,0.16405171272973426,0.0,0.0,0.1671891114338616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001616898890056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633563328399299,0.1012805828283623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053308874278928,0.0,0.09623728323582627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934565847846702,0.0,0.0943252999433416,0.0,0.0,0.16712489084240684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05583175635063047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442396575550826,0.0,0.0,0.13169569570531184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267103235713559,0.10516738752385037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868742132054413,0.0,0.053989845094611986,0.16015656444230306,0.11081840438590976,0.10402141708887187,0.2134749493943504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06557561096989475,0.09959940617570363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900228246296276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576833773390598,0.0,0.0,0.0921910903460434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471554594319701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293472187367068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828414075463336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831042022317137,0.10014277098281762,0.0,0.07562954574691465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845416991972197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370361965794154,0.0,0.0652659405378938,0.06294788746671554,0.0,0.15598233597581004,0.057284226640194835,0.2258236448633865,0.09311953342247004,0.0,0.4365906761447416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081969001769356,0.0,0.05794418638435653,0.0,0.0788017794072303,0.0,0.0,0.091068975551822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978650288501002,0.0,0.0,0.1897889988247687
mentalhealth,MRviltseri,2020/02/11,What would you do if you ever finded your ones good friends that just left you To your misery when you needed them most Forgivenes is NOT option anymore...,5.9593103448275855,7.300125793103452,4.713275862068965,87.09681034482759,66.93103448275862,5.8000000000000025,24.84482758620689,3.1291,0.4104344827586206,124,3,22,0,2,36,25,29,0.10400000000000001,0.728,0.168,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,6,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,4,2,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,7,2,1,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,3,2,20,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3851092764204486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3512578369363351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3549176119080107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.300015209827927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32570454546143396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4219110146339924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879344950309144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631358055535198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275851516288045,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ColorfulPlants,2020/02/11,"Getting upset at once thing, and then looking for other stuff to make you more upset, or having everything you’re feeling terrible about start overwhelming you when one bad thing happens? Idk if this even makes sense but if it does, I’m wondering if there’s a term for it so I can learn more about it. What causes it to happen, how to prevent it, etc. ?",4.446521739130431,5.7450246666666684,4.841275362318843,84.93234782608697,70.44927536231884,7.838840579710146,26.84347826086957,8.238735603445708,1.6867078260869564,278,9,54,4,5,88,53,69,0.13699999999999998,0.828,0.035,-0.7236,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,0,7,5,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,4,0,14,12,10,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,0,2,3,0,8,12,4,5,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,5,4,41,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996139577904388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455913523397962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092122855570568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26662690480998913,0.157903870857011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21486123214300384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208812742531627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490451670463786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42281866877284413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007590852654344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31916295227692043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25460237736574737,0.1620004198930456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921539504580588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736786299557859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176557558078602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592618582484225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mmaonliinee,2020/02/11,"Anyone from Reddit been on sertraline for PTSD? Right, so basically over 2 years ago I went through a pretty severe trauma. While I was travelling I had a psychotic breakdown which led to me being sectioned abroad. I also went through ongoing trauma when I got back with my parents splitting up and dealing with my mum's abusive alcoholism. Last year I sought out treatment to start medication, I've been on fluoxetine, paroxetine which didn't help. I'm currently on beta blockers, olanzapine and I've just started sertraline. I'm on 50mg but I'm looking to push it to 100mg next week while attending CBT. I've quit smoking, drugs and alcohol. I really just want this to stop. Is there any help or advice from you guys? Thank you",3.5331366459627347,6.208258442028985,4.757184265010352,78.51260869565219,76.89855072463769,8.290683229813665,29.422360248447205,9.04235418022936,2.9970273291925467,587,27,102,15,14,193,98,138,0.121,0.8240000000000001,0.055,-0.769,2,0,3,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,1,8,3,0,0,2,0,7,4,0,1,0,14,18,10,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,6,2,2,0,1,0,6,1,2,0,0,8,1,12,1,19,9,1,29,0,0,1,0,8,9,0,1,14,59,16,0,0.0,0.19732145621233294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16273996180039133,0.14762675556333638,0.3559590393766464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331811604955705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325221586904945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644792560485227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280581942038496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169437356167158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19313234179267652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133196434289613,0.0,0.0,0.16489977138862902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22325513285415266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357514946883296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985079756233115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677704994927985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17711609239045242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849218264511869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16943001241571146,0.0,0.0,0.194675153126359,0.0,0.0,0.1771347027349351,0.0,0.0,0.10668913374728298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422233772134678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881416416450168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23575429152501115,0.0,0.0,0.13923404268572853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332671567652334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822900406944376,0.0,0.1335875226330213,0.0,0.0,0.3087666020795172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214491283206362
mentalhealth,clash2k,2020/02/11,Sertraline I forgot to take my dose today. Now I'm scared something bad will happen,2.5874999999999986,5.490152750000004,3.7550000000000026,82.39000000000001,84.0,5.7,20.5,7.1686216300943375,1.0450999999999997,68,2,11,1,2,22,15,16,0.348,0.652,0.0,-0.7506,0,0,1,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3919537033970345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41511461654626414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4699804372129456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36138946736355293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3529522737013709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4449639126129736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zeljko92,2020/02/11,"Cognitive overload - overhinking Hello everyone. I have a problem and i need advice from fellow redditors who might have experienced something similar to this.

Theese days i am having a lots of pressure behind my head on the neck area, and somethimes even dizzines from overthinking.

My brain is constantly looking for a way to improve information gathering, but I'm afraid it\`s becoming my obsession. It\`s like being perfectionist on brain steroids.

For past few days i feel confuzed and i just don\`t know what is best to do. I try to do multitasking at my job, because somethimes my Colegues are not with me and i try to cover 3 positions at same time like (Talking with customers, Computer Repair, and sales). 

Do any of you guys have experienced something similar to this and how would you advise to detox from such cognitive overload because it is starting to take tool on my body in the ways that are exausting.

Thanks.",6.005416301489923,8.64034095705522,5.8181989482909735,74.08621165644173,68.87730061349693,9.565118317265558,35.569237510955304,9.957137785484203,4.181931113058721,748,39,118,20,14,233,107,163,0.067,0.81,0.12300000000000001,0.9153,1,0,4,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,1,4,8,0,3,5,0,16,6,5,1,0,21,24,8,0,3,3,0,1,2,1,2,1,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,16,4,24,21,4,15,0,0,1,0,10,7,0,2,8,83,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16464821644808905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458018759095052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054220492631771,0.18608593224638195,0.0,0.0,0.17682172700810042,0.0,0.0,0.18715638278445385,0.0,0.3761850980186099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820797553640868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173265170348187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128723098614424,0.0,0.0,0.1610011154495916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519450610487596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683335151041007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729211751962833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16720209201028155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09259867533136723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463314480165697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414906586725352,0.0,0.0,0.1432456852348404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874315104893534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493451922234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16084446835616464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122387724981607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594264065697877,0.0,0.0,0.11925934844198355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668484879343414,0.135427309654281,0.0,0.1551245925751601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824891134561199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287897157834773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26748186314412714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969172557980658,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ennaxanne,2020/02/11,"Mental Health Check — should I be worried? TLDR: I have weird feelings. Should I consider seeing someone? 

So, a bit of background. I do come from a family with history of mental illness. The closest relationship that I have with it is my sister. Others would include aunts, cousins, etc. It’s mainly clinical depression & anxiety, nothing more severe. And my sister is not on medication but is seeing a therapist monthly / quarterly. 

Now, about me. All things considered, I believe that I’m just beginning to become more aware of how I might’ve been feeling “off” all this time. For some time now, I’ve been feeling pretty hollow and empty. Sad, sometimes. I’m able to feel and present myself as being happy, excited, and the like, but lately these moments tend to be quickly followed by a profound sense of emptiness. Like, on the surface I’m smiling and enjoying my time around friends and family, and then suddenly my brain will go — “But you’re all alone. Are you really happy? This feels fake. You’re being fake,” and I just can’t seem to shake the feeling like it’s all a facade, and that I’m in fact very isolated. 

I could be scrolling media online or watching Netflix and be invested one minute, and feel weirded out the next. Weirded out as in... detached. I don’t quite know how to explain it. It’s a weird feeling. The sensation of emptiness and disconnection seems to be a motif here. 

I’ve also been feeling really lethargic. Like, I have enough energy to do things, but I honestly just don’t want to if there’s no motivation to do it. And when I do do things, my limbs literally feel heavy. I’m not sure if it’s laziness or something else. All I know is that it’s becoming more and more apparent. I used to dance and do stuff, go out often, but now I just feel like there’s no point for it, my old passion doesn’t interest me anymore. Maybe I’m just growing out of it. 

I also sleep a lot. I get tired pretty easily and sleep a good 12-14 hours straight when I can. And then find myself taking mid-day naps on top of that. But I also struggle with insomnia quite a bit too, sometimes to the point where I take any drowsy medication I can find just to fall asleep. Sometimes with the insomnia, it’s just that my mind keeps running. 

Full disclosure too, I’m not actively suicidal, but I do have these thoughts (never act on them). First time I had them, it was maybe 7-8 years back. Ears ringing, heart pumping, just a horrible feeling all about where I just wanted to cry. Wanted to take whatever meds I could and just die. I don’t recall it having reason, but ever since then, passive thoughts have been frequent. Like, “if I just walked in front of a car, things would be easy”, and “nice balcony, I wonder how it’d feel like to lean over and fall”. I remember cutting my wrist once, though shallow and nothing serious, just because I wanted to know how it felt. 

Now, people have thoughts about what they want to do when they retire and the like, thoughts about marriage. I honestly don’t see myself reaching 30 / 35. I’m currently 23. It’s just not there, though I’m quite an idealistic person and ambitious otherwise when it comes to work. 

For a couple of years now (recent years), I’ve been prone to stressing / bumming myself out so much that I cry uncontrollably. That said, it’s usually a build up of stress and its subsequent release. I also constantly review old actions taken by myself (things I’ve said) over events that have long passed that no-one else thinks about anymore, and I feel shit about myself because of it. It’s sometimes a source of anxiety. 

I have all of these headaches and aches that don’t ease up. I’ve quit my job because I felt suffocated. At least half of my schooling days were filled with doctors notes. I take a sick day at work at least once every month, because I can’t get out of bed or have no motivation to. I’ve cried uncontrollably on the way to school because I was so tired and couldn’t stand going (ended up taking a sick day 5 mins from arriving on campus), and that felt like a nervous breakdown of sorts. I’ve done work at 5AM for a day that starts at 9AM because I couldn’t sleep and got increasingly worked up. I feel like my closest friends don’t truly enjoy my presence, and like I’m the most unimportant person in the family. There’s always this divide that I feel, and it reinforces the constant feeling of loneliness. 

I check-out of my head when it comes to any conflict. I grew up with one volatile parent, though never violent. It’s just that I detach myself from a situation that seems to be escalating. 

I’ve been sexually harassed. It’s honestly become a norm for me IMO, and I tell these encounters like jokes, but I feel pretty intensely about people walking behind me, or looking at me. I hate people touching me in places I don’t want to be touched, like a rib or armpit (even if it’s immediate family to which I have a close relationship with). I’m plagued with outrageous worries about sexual violence. 

My mind still thinks sharply (I know how it feels to have a really muddled mind and not being to think straight and all, as I had a recent mental / nervous breakdown) and I still have an appetite and all, but I just feel like my headspace has been stuck in this odd space that I can’t understand. It’s not debilitating, half-miserable, and extremely isolating because I find it hard to talk about because it’s so confusing. 

So, yeah. That was a lot. Congrats if you made it this far. Really, my question is: is what I’m feeling pretty normal, or is it edging towards a mental health issue? Would it be stupid to present this to a GP? 

I know mental illness presents in all shapes and forms, but I honestly don’t know if I’m just overthinking my thoughts and feelings, or if there is legitimately / possibly something that needs to be professionally addressed. Some outside perspective would be nice. 

Thanks in advance!",4.003636346365745,5.921537086572439,4.793139177020403,82.37790284585283,72.56890459363956,7.907686462251606,28.779816862342795,8.622645009754043,2.262418241574528,4650,188,873,86,93,1500,433,1132,0.14400000000000002,0.679,0.177,0.9907,5,1,2,0,0,1,166.0,0,2,4,14,70,58,7,9,43,1,85,27,12,10,15,211,181,92,2,25,47,5,28,14,2,7,14,4,2,2,72,58,0,2,53,4,2,24,25,25,0,5,28,37,95,33,116,127,30,135,0,2,5,1,24,52,1,27,71,580,167,14,0.0383071554997324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039674660264091284,0.0,0.12253687365256767,0.031874622098022595,0.04150578697939954,0.0,0.05210035869630595,0.0,0.05860973821199971,0.0,0.07598080963198191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0341014899833549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0294558380197006,0.0,0.18681349150779436,0.12692173082729405,0.0,0.04315904630660133,0.0,0.0,0.08364298467883652,0.0,0.0,0.04276345447466028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989946675469902,0.0,0.08279285245779955,0.0,0.06117029316984764,0.04238613894671154,0.1262358346530307,0.12352473112711122,0.0,0.0329938968998947,0.0,0.03975677948884235,0.0,0.0,0.03920899686713933,0.0,0.039201520036540025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640014259063893,0.0,0.03392876960662332,0.03958153177935662,0.042722604421446604,0.025301514924185288,0.03465101527554932,0.0322754306825937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444503078224596,0.0,0.4261234740818448,0.1368331977157021,0.11034262993178263,0.0,0.10503613840235827,0.03258404689885293,0.0,0.0,0.05919202662817091,0.0,0.040027815358146784,0.0,0.06531251777772852,0.032130224562492996,0.030637731678388708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815573586962545,0.0343156870356076,0.037820385301086806,0.03931419315735468,0.08143742994573294,0.0,0.04539416370894546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037724831778380284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039982717830270034,0.0380139409424236,0.034049159915638186,0.0,0.0,0.12631566506393224,0.0,0.04321213994594618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26200917691206743,0.0,0.0,0.03390062716137949,0.032168362716129335,0.0,0.0,0.0651347474580567,0.0,0.03624715676211776,0.0,0.0,0.0769693730622688,0.0,0.04255061403016636,0.07718085809764724,0.19302301402300232,0.040637838355629605,0.11603792073666475,0.0,0.0611528120966099,0.0,0.0281601669701068,0.02840427041484672,0.05908967976524222,0.0,0.0407400944591694,0.0,0.03753287901050584,0.07351349770338066,0.0,0.08039383147963239,0.08159174079381339,0.051915839927190566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04253556283624061,0.0,0.0,0.079672074908455,0.06689666121299713,0.04002282423478728,0.0,0.07242528782828203,0.043185562070068934,0.0,0.15588859525689078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042912781164086464,0.16297750077975767,0.0,0.0,0.09816217889562176,0.03938613590146398,0.07564738929262384,0.08225509790794132,0.043394539647523635,0.0,0.07287775426117547,0.0,0.0,0.07753777297431093,0.0915775298674346,0.10462018695244092,0.0,0.043276182016391225,0.03932174463185895,0.031688074884600924,0.04305884778859742,0.11500446140790868,0.0,0.03245752854350506,0.05898143964396488,0.1515470252026607,0.0,0.0271140018285579,0.0,0.06118428773091265,0.0,0.08776143439715034,0.040046956303488576,0.04385252814053767,0.04190181061377855,0.0,0.036104040711934134,0.0,0.14401106775737407,0.03078984054142447,0.033482142362991664,0.03526808205549873,0.0,0.04447756005894152,0.12724785976912426,0.07363703540724968,0.11290975734730573,0.15205801257997795,0.08934884171951259,0.08805688007344248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03987909984961985,0.0,0.03308508295920348,0.04218991978879076,0.03160741513714914,0.1355673169075064,0.03040643698436809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0415424760656095,0.11155226175930093,0.07780555176711265,0.0,0.10884921672410068,0.0,0.0,0.07400565657720007
mentalhealth,ellahx,2020/02/11,"Dating with mental health struggles. I (25F) have been dating this boy (25M) for about a month now, I genuinely think he might be the one at this rate. We click on every level and we have so much fun together. I’m not sure what diagnosis he has but I know he struggles with mental health, has counselling/on meds etc. He’s been struggling this week really badly so I haven’t seen him/ spoken much. It doesn’t faze me, I’m sticking around but can anyone give advice on what I can do? What I can say? I know everyone is different and I’ve definitely struggled at times myself but it’s so SHIT knowing I can’t make it better for him. Other than just letting him know I’m there for him when he’s ready and being understanding etc what can I do? Or does anyone have advice on how to go forward and not let it ruin what we have",0.7457058823529401,3.096360688235293,2.6485294117647062,91.21338235294121,86.23529411764706,5.282352941176471,17.911764705882355,6.742157984588678,0.06149411764705848,647,16,136,8,20,215,99,170,0.146,0.759,0.095,-0.8796,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,3,0,0,1,10,10,1,4,2,0,23,3,1,2,1,27,36,13,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,13,10,0,0,6,0,0,2,5,7,0,1,3,3,18,3,14,28,4,16,0,1,2,0,15,8,1,2,8,93,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436236327990309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17432391131172792,0.0,0.0,0.11096973650821262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408205404323632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024757330185586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023836383151233,0.0,0.0,0.10908678257218332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780474494168197,0.0,0.0,0.10502755276337478,0.11911357886737965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958082058923634,0.0708445377999625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650057269460969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740293962882769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549371889841145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320844898621721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846405038298806,0.0,0.2512466524671932,0.13223968268802025,0.0,0.0,0.0994987528170964,0.0,0.18327212741879104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446972669133951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985744268385428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913097919365857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795697909300938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5212675682057493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748624141175887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987414841577263,0.0,0.0,0.07268756752100769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977066998119616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999104461016642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CautiousInspector9,2020/02/11,"I need help with my girlfriend I don't know where to post this, so if this is the wrong place, I'm sorry

I'm at my wits end with my girlfriend. She is the one light in my life. The most important thing to me. I love her more than anything or anyone I have ever met.

We've been together for almost 3 years. I'm looking for an engagement ring.

She doesn't have many friends at this school.

My girlfriend uses me as a place to vent, has an eating disorder where she stress eats herself into debt. Says I don't do enough to help her. She's getting worse.

She just got surgery in her last semester of college. Due to this, she is behind in school and is catching up slowly.

I don't know how to help her anymore. I don't know if I ever have. I know she's stressed, but it makes me feel worthless. Like I'm never good enough.

I try so hard to be there for her at all times. I go hang out with her whenever I can. I see her all the time. I want to be able to help her. She told me I do a 'piss poor job' of showing her how much I care. I think it's just stress that made her say that, but it really hurts.

The truth is, I just don't know anymore. It's becoming too much for me to handle. Due to money issues, she can't see a therapist. Her school's therapist was useless. She can't talk to anyone else due to having nobody else. It's just me.

I see the brunt of all of this. 

I have no idea how to handle this. 

I guess where I'm going with this is how do I help someone with an eating disorder? I am lost on the subject. I just want to help.",-0.20739853626081128,1.7128567664670662,1.877435129740519,98.12703759148373,86.12574850299403,5.02847638057219,17.960412508316697,6.286939319323684,-0.3701926813040584,1176,29,287,11,36,392,152,334,0.154,0.741,0.106,-0.9463,2,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,0,1,18,16,1,3,13,0,29,6,1,7,7,46,61,13,0,5,10,0,2,1,4,0,1,3,0,0,15,8,3,0,8,1,3,4,10,9,0,1,7,10,57,7,41,52,9,31,0,4,4,1,38,15,1,6,12,191,72,5,0.08662412228861523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674154564350832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17181570542857905,0.1211392008307275,0.08875665004985504,0.07128427178997154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956695373561303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831906586835822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19855749780951407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659143085112711,0.1447266776150879,0.0,0.07672326094603711,0.1790117488232531,0.0,0.0,0.1567129558692932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379975899277562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692558199975804,0.0,0.04525752861700263,0.0,0.09846096990060307,0.07265620392204546,0.06928122385837453,0.0,0.09542623679080968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759819885898565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3483739392715684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273291451267376,0.09778809013944284,0.0,0.09041307801579528,0.08596107505010916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23803176096656986,0.07061022123281067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06118517935209347,0.04232017059679041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274244587975175,0.0,0.09456046225553387,0.0,0.07818165239701144,0.08196583899314135,0.05782227427498396,0.08782326380704265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735739396277518,0.06423068906674016,0.06680986331672696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586987471126712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18100754157401136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296196403344394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05549363087550749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777395776318124,0.0,0.2630047091917532,0.2070846306033186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339633770924188,0.0,0.0,0.09696861288075703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976829182277501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962518823215541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011545650614488,0.057549217746967286,0.055505239833788966,0.0,0.0,0.10102244463845993,0.0,0.0,0.08277306104197908,0.0,0.05881209287724485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481542899229474,0.0,0.0,0.10218630335888833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827738111790502,0.0,0.0947098792400674,0.0,0.055783094670458486
mentalhealth,delirium-delarium,2020/02/11,"what can I do to improve my mental state at the moment? A little background: I’ve (18F) been feeling very low since the beginning of october. I’m failing my last year of high school and i’ll have to take a one year break before starting college because I missed a dead line for my last really important project, therefore i’ll be unable to graduate this summer. 

I can’t bring myself to study and I’ve been sleeping almost all day after school, because I’m just incredibly tired, since I have a weird kind of sleep paralysis and have poor sleep. more often than not though, the naps are just a break from my issues. ( which is ironic, because they still follow me in my dreams.)

I kind of drown my problems in alcohol and partying on the weekends, which results in me being hungover and being even more unable to focus on my school work. 

I’m very unhappy with my body but can’t bring myself to go to the gym ( and even if i can, i’m never consistent with it) I also feel generally unhealthy and this makes me want to not take care of myself.

I basically have no discipline and  i’ve kind of always been like this, but never to this extent.
It is ruining a lot of things in my life and I don’t know how to change it. I have zero ambition and I never feel like doing anything besides lay around all day. How do I get out of this endless cycle?",3.2021404341926747,4.916817809701495,4.571356852103122,83.98537991858889,74.26119402985073,7.260786974219811,25.241519674355487,8.00094639256281,1.5095611940298506,1055,35,205,16,22,350,143,268,0.132,0.8140000000000001,0.055,-0.9548,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,2,11,12,0,0,11,0,22,7,4,5,5,42,43,17,2,3,7,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,12,14,1,1,4,4,1,4,9,6,0,2,3,3,28,6,33,37,6,35,0,4,0,0,1,12,0,4,18,142,40,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078541598827765,0.11317452316686352,0.0,0.0,0.09038310644072628,0.0940427897650426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09300691392200136,0.10061293411783864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20669023761027155,0.0,0.0961728164274062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554120445119418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523276524577712,0.0,0.11956156738584625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577879900124044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492990280126243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714409214888795,0.08074245150943815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904897339494525,0.0,0.06423261907762426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194132268029583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796489117843904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35308292867070123,0.062113560108036835,0.18425491635975133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983029869574887,0.11043301320260762,0.11327705148619445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608668210653347,0.0,0.0,0.07544260678025695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389890472587715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615070218412614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658616947259854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081461365896555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240434980193969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34315082043553485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18698480284830246,0.0,0.3393088191905767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799970699514658,0.0,0.09025896982099514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699559295454199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508634102401954,0.0,0.1110428701970752,0.0,0.0,0.12990137788372486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18650884629272155,0.06666290109906613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228086491647964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556404530874584
mentalhealth,Mysticplums,2020/02/11,"Is there a reason why I feel the effects of doing marijuana when I haven’t been? I’m not a heavy user and I mostly take edibles, usually less than the serving size. For the record, marijuana is legal in my state and a lot of people use it for recreation, including myself.

Lately, I’ve been having negative experiences with weed. Things like, paranoia, fear or panic, certain body parts feel uncomfortable like my toes, teeth, and heart, constantly aware of needing to breathe, and the feeling of my fingers bending backwards. Yeah, it not great. This doesn’t happen all the time, but I feels like I can’t remember the last time I had a good high.

So recently, I feel like I have been experiencing what I can only describe as the negative effects I have after doing weed, except I’m sober. 

Most notably, last night. 
I was taking a shower and I felt like I became more aware of things that I shouldn’t be. Like I thought the water wasn’t hitting me and I had to keep checking, I felt like I couldn’t wash the shampoo out of my hair, I panicked when my eyes were closed, time felt like it was slow, but what really freaked me out was this weird feeling that I wasn’t real. Like I had to keep finding ways to prove that I was here or else I’d fade into this false reality where I was stuck in this kind of purgatory-like state.

I want to note that I had gone to the doctor that day to review some lab tests and it didn’t go so great. I also got my flu shot. So maybe the stress of that? I have sleep problems like sleep walking and hallucinations. I have anxiety and depression. I have your typical problems like stress about work, my future, paying rent, and all that. 

I don’t really know what’s going on but sometimes I have this paranoid fear that I’m slowly losing my mind. Has anyone ever experienced something like this? What could cause something like this?",3.8540763546798016,5.5713663269230755,4.735941644562335,83.46423076923077,72.54395604395604,7.438272072754831,26.01326259946949,8.104835398774808,1.5788131110269044,1469,49,285,22,29,476,189,364,0.18100000000000002,0.687,0.132,-0.9749,2,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,0,4,11,29,0,5,16,1,37,14,10,5,5,61,65,22,0,7,8,0,11,13,0,1,3,0,2,0,25,15,1,2,17,0,3,4,13,11,0,0,23,14,43,18,29,37,9,36,0,2,1,0,1,11,0,6,31,188,68,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780500473818983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486265658182855,0.0,0.0,0.0592858037729142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418045360317093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710072412518309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916258034966068,0.0,0.06769639039393052,0.0,0.0,0.054681303543649834,0.0,0.07302785745853993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678420263581921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708295692142085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766956813865955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293902133215042,0.0,0.19082034691666655,0.2572284346410809,0.12114525651452092,0.2442295881176849,0.0,0.07749477796369234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637405069189296,0.0711162269367492,0.06781278091068726,0.18695833655031205,0.0,0.0,0.07497782774697682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047429458982987,0.0,0.08958327200766282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072709989041594,0.0,0.08829374792951063,0.04659731672525853,0.13822721932002804,0.09564465834471066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5385013119058816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09485618447432632,0.0,0.07208380185276235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518103244546549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561180027782203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06286929420197916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956787852555296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644851629508232,0.0,0.09948055470450816,0.0,0.09181723865779462,0.0,0.05878138561497955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622615020139286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650740860811514,0.10863484283106978,0.0871762776971026,0.0837180097145488,0.0,0.096048377233925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16969864538431678,0.0,0.0,0.1305480277182017,0.08385758878637478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19424894067401147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750018296470111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265887862010668,0.0,0.0,0.06731227233819076,0.14832185093902248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322968637743398,0.0933821020860642,0.0,0.05001021211688437,0.06730083908104821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650806305362644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06172673915764373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,da3m0ns91,2020/02/11,"Am I loosing my mind? Hey reddit, please help me on this:

I've got mild anxiety and depression issues and most of the time I can deal with that pretty good! However, about every two weeks hell breaks loose inside me: A trip of self-destruction. It's like another person takes over, that wants to torture myself. I will deny myself food, harm myself physically, come up with the most cruel thoughts I can even imagine (like my friends woudn't even care for my funeral). I will cry a lot. During this ""self-destruction trip"" I am very conviced, that killing myself is a good idea. I will plan on how to do it, what to write in my suicide note and so on. This trips last for 1-3 days and have a very sudden ending. From one hour to another, I can go from: ""I'm the most disgusting human being"" to ""of course my friends love me!"". These thoughts then seem to me completely absurd, and I'm functioning like a normal human being again, meetings friends, working and so on.

So what is going on? Am I loosing my mind? Has anyone experienced the same thing? 

How dangerous is this? Should I go to the hospital? I'm scared, that on a really bad day, I might execute my plan.",3.6252556538839715,5.284039853982304,4.657109144542776,84.03624385447398,73.02654867256638,8.031071779744346,26.27236971484759,8.680891452615391,1.8978729596853487,901,31,177,17,18,294,129,226,0.214,0.6629999999999999,0.124,-0.9790000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,2,45.0,0,0,0,3,9,20,6,1,11,0,19,2,0,2,0,28,34,12,3,3,0,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,0,3,14,9,1,0,5,0,0,7,0,10,0,2,3,1,26,10,26,24,5,27,1,1,0,1,12,9,1,6,13,118,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581461319226767,0.09416531401709816,0.0,0.0,0.08606903607146624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277697415611996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12550085874586295,0.0,0.0,0.10603316377063557,0.12905999141122448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521117107781672,0.15876877051917046,0.12690281217625693,0.10601926427271588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902329004320092,0.0,0.0,0.16260267802775524,0.0,0.10371061731312327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14884376325688922,0.0,0.28530254245064857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098686646079552,0.20648805319165095,0.09844820032574016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250621032086193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212211737852831,0.0,0.0,0.1389562849986477,0.0,0.1284764373499135,0.0,0.0,0.13618345223325706,0.0,0.0,0.10033669756156167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804101198291132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464871768624516,0.11109565547964828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058153564488933,0.24857637604034544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060437209959846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341056483689256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747949576283182,0.0,0.13511844093218806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522917668521516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885611403751577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12323692015326508,0.0,0.0,0.11205865620566907,0.2568243416765865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464305675822294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255013129906313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177709055666793,0.0,0.0,0.1954431593141347,0.07177614159569234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024334399991407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20312816691947347,0.07260305969902882,0.0,0.098737261694254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089612699854471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maggiesbell,2020/02/11,"I could really use some advice This is probably all over the place but here goes. 

Context: My entire life I have been working for the perfect grades. I have sacrificed everything to get them. My entire self-worth is based on them. It’s the most important thing in my life. I’m also in my last semester of High School, so all my grades count towards my final GPA. 

Today, I found out I did really terrible on a test. I don’t know the actual grade because the teacher only posted the answers, but I can tell I completely missed the mark. It’s probably gonna be the worst grade I’ve ever received, and this is in a class I’ve only ever gotten the top grade for. It’s also the subject I want to study at university, which made it hurt even more.

I ended up locking myself up in the bathroom for thirty minutes, hyperventilating and sobbing, feeling as if my world was falling apart. It was horrible. I was silently screaming because of all the emotions running through me. 

I’m convinced my future is over because of this one grade. I know logically that I still have the GPA I need, and that this grade is probably only worth 20% of my final grade in the subject, but I’m so embarrassed. And I’m terrified it’s a sign that I’m gonna fail all my classes. And I’m terrified that my inability to cope with failure is gonna make it impossible for me to go to university without having a nervous breakdown. And I’m scared my fear of fearing failure will make it so that I’ll mess up even more and be unable to get through the semester. And then I’ll become a total failure of a person, because I have nothing else in my life besides school. I’ll end up living under some bridge and freeze to death. 

I ended up finding the school counselor (yay for self-care), still struggling to breathe and crying for yet another hour. She ended up calling my therapist, and I talked with him for about 20 minutes before moving up my next appointment to the day after tomorrow. 

I had just recovered from one of the most intense depressive episodes/nervous breakdowns I’ve had in years, which was caused by the immense pressure I’m under and the feeling of being trapped. I’m kind of scared I’ll fall right back. 

Right now I just feel heartbroken. I’m so sad, and so tired. And I feel so embarrassed for having such a huge reaction to something other people would find benign. 

However, tomorrow I have the class with the test. And I know I’ll get the paper back, and I am terrified of having the same reaction I did (idk what to call the reaction, a breakdown maybe?). I’m not going to avoid the class, because that’ll only make it worse. But right now even just thinking about this subject that I love makes my heart hurt. 

I don’t know how to cope with this. Any friendly advice on how to manage my emotions tomorrow would be greatly appreciated.",4.560981012658225,5.876185222423152,5.549308770343583,79.90063584990959,70.19349005424954,8.350976491862568,30.823191681735985,8.769984970463412,2.540048137432188,2240,94,417,39,40,738,241,553,0.233,0.6890000000000001,0.078,-0.9989,1,2,1,0,0,0,61.0,0,0,2,4,29,29,0,10,34,1,36,7,2,9,8,74,76,33,1,6,10,0,5,0,1,7,4,1,0,1,27,21,0,1,14,0,1,7,4,21,0,2,12,6,50,8,69,52,13,68,0,7,0,1,12,33,1,5,27,280,77,23,0.0,0.0,0.07225914240777588,0.0,0.0,0.14471564632472847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184306393228337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035446560230712,0.07764468400160206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387506876840822,0.0,0.2256916691065674,0.08177903939052157,0.06300850116523013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512204310645615,0.0,0.0,0.07606661546192074,0.0,0.0,0.07763681892685162,0.0,0.0,0.05912046481788483,0.0,0.0813370982832953,0.04775415740095757,0.0,0.06377653007020898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06185672574899929,0.1665857060093591,0.2623344798133149,0.0,0.0,0.14672193760076527,0.1339594122142871,0.0,0.0,0.06654862464572199,0.0,0.0,0.16664681145886945,0.14976145238925534,0.0,0.0,0.16222963004401467,0.1353551427930502,0.0,0.0,0.08118865940391337,0.057208490370535776,0.0,0.1160594265772423,0.0,0.08416517690429096,0.0,0.0,0.08163702447142572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774599301135567,0.0,0.07823466879372759,0.0,0.0,0.07292133074208412,0.0,0.15853758423644926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710850442291575,0.16277707027111896,0.06035814767323585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569046531622123,0.0,0.0,0.06538481400382808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683026392393833,0.07006501506059322,0.19770765810149304,0.0,0.0743901144882129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787001900356449,0.0,0.05490487564203427,0.0,0.0,0.07874977203273809,0.0,0.0,0.07105004618082653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003522601856464,0.2252641705311083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051334832181960686,0.06465494116066221,0.07736330331179356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091651022990242,0.0,0.2395054099717725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487274530026543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18970707374115128,0.0,0.0,0.1482678303387799,0.22481840162789132,0.0,0.0,0.15449423708096496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057004960196889436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11826798083700513,0.0,0.0,0.0774099501086195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595161340627625,0.0647202985966526,0.0,0.0,0.0859742168424386,0.0491935037534847,0.04744629607490116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510607699557025,0.07018785110867036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395279086386832,0.0,0.0,0.043674809968247616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137861802973662,0.0,0.05390706194904325,0.0,0.07546016869361026,0.10520165842467454,0.0,0.0,0.047683808477080536
mentalhealth,shortshit042,2020/02/11,"Depression symptoms but not depressed? Why am I having depression tendencies when i'm not depressed? 

\- I already take daily meds for depression, but don't know why I am having a hard time w/ loss of interests, no motivation.",3.765000000000001,6.960115500000002,5.23,71.815,81.5,9.2,33.0,9.3871,4.40035,180,10,27,6,5,60,29,40,0.348,0.4320000000000001,0.22,-0.8153,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,1,7,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,0,6,8,3,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,1,3,1,2,8,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,17,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21103137588923446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8235474357282996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713080218997695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050971561713768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21241776428852185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19876525546751814,0.14378410156025956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151003124404067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34511771991188234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vanillakid_owo,2020/02/11,"my view of relationships is corrupted hai reddit. this is the second time ive typed this cuz somehow the first take got removed..   
(edit: it got removed from r/relationships for some reason but ok heres my third time.. urgh  


​

anyway... i just wanted to get something off my chest that i have on my mind for weeks/months.. I see relationships as a stressful thing cuz i feel like i always have to be there for my partner and also do anything for her to not make her disappointed, which is maybe the wrong vision. relationships are amazing cuz you have someone that loves and supports you for maybe the rest of your life.. anyway... what may caused my vision like that could be a gf that i had for 11 months.., she was really addicted to me, i would be the only one who could make her happy and calm her down. so i had to call with her every evening, which sounds not that wrong, but also i had to call with her when i didnt want or, did want to do something else, like playing games with friends or watching a movie, but i ended up ditching those things just to not disappoint her, which stressed me out and that might be why i have this vision now where relationships are just stressful for me. anyway, i wanted to get this off my chest, thanks for reading ig...   


btw this is my first ever real post aside from some random bootleg pics but ok.. thanks for reading and bai!",5.9526879699248125,6.226275124060153,5.665930451127821,84.05160244360904,66.55639097744361,8.15375939849624,28.27913533834587,7.645422480735847,1.50063984962406,1077,31,215,10,16,333,140,266,0.075,0.722,0.203,0.9907,0,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,3,0,2,17,21,0,3,8,2,28,5,2,7,1,45,45,19,0,7,12,0,1,3,3,3,2,1,0,1,20,9,0,0,2,4,0,2,4,7,0,5,8,5,36,14,32,28,3,19,0,2,3,1,23,7,0,8,12,165,56,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096278611604302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812655308245445,0.07706215707074203,0.10034708696200267,0.11253598635152368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621332190622095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18913822755086396,0.0,0.0,0.0951399537944608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14788927460290027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736700251350745,0.0,0.08202839753211777,0.0,0.0,0.061170586155317876,0.0837745455809096,0.07803117794272392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0468283542457527,0.06616336559179781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575546171118749,0.0,0.0,0.07155324444832603,0.0,0.09677384675627347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481435408790436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858918431719244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541591367574275,0.13573937295687405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358763148832442,0.0,0.12364095169978614,0.0,0.18608615651412114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824867798420832,0.09351360513359536,0.0,0.14784701122460922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275755362095498,0.07043701972847058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869848442139372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852778606608076,0.1054148572014518,0.05933081516384445,0.0952224808160628,0.0,0.4971631707003261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380126180102611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847142956097508,0.14259736012317098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182666176308823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509711954482016,0.0,0.0,0.06963410257423887,0.0,0.0,0.1705328126298487,0.0,0.0,0.12305707689695042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800778207665553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185042348540434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356961043589273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579023439418487,0.20251745112834374,0.11253598635152368,0.0
mentalhealth,haleeyxx,2020/02/11,"been feeling especially low. like the title says, i’ve been feeling extremely low lately. my emotions have been crazy, and i’ve been feeling every little tiny thing so deeply. i’ve been overthinking everything, i’ve been anxious, i can’t be in my room without feeling depressed, but i can’t find the want to go out and talk to a friend or even text a friend, i never go out and do anything and even if i wanted to i don’t have money to do so, my schedule is busy, i’ve been crying more than usual, it’s hurting my relationships, i’ve been worried about my relationship with my boyfriend, he says he’s lost a little bit of feelings but doesn’t want to break up he just feels like me being clingy and needy causes it but it’s hard to be less clingy when i’m sitting here overthinking if he even wants to be with me anymore. i hate how i look everyday but i can’t find the motivation to try and dress better to make myself feel better. i’m disappointed in my school work. i’m just so unhappy and i feel like in the last year i’ve gone down hill and my struggle grows more every day.",2.8652067762830096,4.4075424887892405,4.163639760837075,87.2773181365222,74.7847533632287,6.928649725959144,24.94494270054809,7.594959193182576,1.1399648231190835,857,28,180,11,18,282,113,223,0.171,0.672,0.157,-0.7537,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,5,12,15,1,1,7,0,22,0,0,4,1,41,44,20,0,6,10,0,9,3,2,0,0,2,1,0,4,12,0,0,11,0,1,4,7,8,0,0,10,12,20,7,22,30,4,27,0,6,1,0,11,12,0,3,12,105,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678636219989428,0.11130060464429337,0.0,0.0,0.09235456714578402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985141355441728,0.12252455342472818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528967680701645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327783636168192,0.07237815616633947,0.0,0.09666232019154566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262420582923272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22237777589775173,0.0,0.18911485505495806,0.0,0.10086382022869887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4539691779174805,0.16035225436460016,0.0,0.0,0.20514979629388494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17341506061192227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275641881103363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053477277609364,0.11080249795388517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12014302685476586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914812798710766,0.12659873795114698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644876606939892,0.22496506155083615,0.0,0.0,0.09424375018017947,0.0,0.12251076347452668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749134553521835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655760734801182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24098301075159564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784973587254936,0.0,0.11358132476624999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732568979801247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020508956828632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745596884297183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619584579076423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360393644476522,0.0,0.2647813207026569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818435595704128,0.0,0.08170375021920398,0.11397358093848756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227153245699927
mentalhealth,RealTeacherTalk,2020/02/11,"Breaking the Silence on Teachers and Mental Health Hey teachers! I'm a 20 year teacher veteran who is taking a leave to deal with severe anxiety and depression linked to my teaching job. So many teacher friends and colleagues have shared their private journeys with mental illness with me. In a profession where the stress of scores, low pay, safety, and dealing with the trauma that our students face is ever increasing, why is society so ""hush hush"" about what educators are dealing with? Share your story! You are not alone!",7.994818840579711,9.431945945652178,6.935652173913045,72.64775362318842,62.3695652173913,9.1768115942029,39.2463768115942,9.2995712137729,4.023298550724638,425,22,63,7,6,129,71,92,0.20199999999999999,0.6829999999999999,0.115,-0.8112,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,2,1,0,5,7,0,1,6,0,6,3,1,0,1,12,8,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,9,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,4,0,0,0,2,6,3,11,8,1,9,0,2,0,0,12,4,0,0,2,41,9,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20276894259769854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14977109525410714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6055214715371675,0.16862494957831406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17709413717952008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125907278999529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20810488921711046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942813513098432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073026562711697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19849009983794316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3946002026476218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211755717306373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22426522539971966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720212718724884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17666091713120036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607584312439127
mentalhealth,theoneeyedpete,2020/02/11,"I’ve got a work residential course which I’m panicking about - what do I do? I’m currently undertaking a management training course over the next 12 months and part of that course is a 4 day residential trip, which involves one day of doing outdoors related activities.  

The company who runs the course don’t reveal what activities take place - as that’s part of the course.  I’m worried that it involve things I have phobia’s of Eg. heights).

I had anxiety issues several years ago, and have had no big problems since I started my job almost 3 years ago.  I’ve faced lots of things that would’ve terrified me years ago - but I worry that this type of experience is too much for me.  The other side of the worry is this will be the first time since my anxiety was bad that I’ve been away without friends/family.  But I should I just be facing it?

I don’t *have* to go on it, but it’s strongly recommended.  I’ve not said no to something because of my anxious behaviour in so long.

Any advice would be much appreciated. Thank you.",3.855279850746268,5.568164562189053,5.160121268656717,80.4422714552239,72.5323383084577,8.806094527363184,28.48289800995025,9.354420925462401,2.516445024875622,811,32,160,19,16,270,116,201,0.154,0.784,0.062,-0.9378,2,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,3,4,4,0,0,10,0,21,2,2,0,0,14,30,7,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,20,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,6,2,0,2,6,1,14,2,18,18,5,26,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,2,15,101,34,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517231599399575,0.34064373664793146,0.0,0.12826798800891184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710855032133102,0.0,0.19598365378325125,0.14471015452556485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12034885812768688,0.0,0.10695343147395954,0.07808512663303434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16522051711828642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530085336063507,0.12075595276829287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089569883964191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279897085567764,0.0,0.1024487530765344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369722110372334,0.12711387676991154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133594685681534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089012353962854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224368781910396,0.0,0.18832817147161449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622979407794197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680004644752069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774273959892761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13383133191768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256899311905894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218470598517263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471015452556485,0.0,0.21192193948308288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861328850342724,0.0,0.0,0.09066583999787546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631100941699486,0.0,0.0,0.11793206716198927,0.0,0.0,0.1702003882252172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469284540289202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347838202905086,0.0,0.09325421215964992,0.3902580898276043,0.0,0.1819891016051885,0.0,0.0,0.2474656843571885
mentalhealth,anonymous102511,2020/02/11,I something really dark and disturbing and I can’t shake it Hello reddit the other day I was on tik tok and there was a video of this girl saying don’t google the following things and like a dumb ass I googled one and I immediately went into a panic attack and have been in and out of them since. I usually have a strong tolerance for stuff like that but this deeply disturbed me and I think I might be a bit traumatized. What can I do to get past this?,1.2581914893617032,3.507639712765957,3.014297872340425,90.19400000000002,82.72340425531915,6.7387234042553175,18.974468085106388,7.908726449838941,0.6660417021276595,359,9,78,7,10,119,66,94,0.21100000000000002,0.711,0.078,-0.9076,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,1,1,9,2,4,7,0,11,1,1,0,0,13,15,9,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,9,10,0,0,1,1,0,3,2,6,0,1,4,1,11,3,8,9,1,10,0,0,0,1,4,4,2,1,5,57,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981777132555992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861463965621107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16903345491098815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13693694899777145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25609860810704993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780477299844412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760641345716713,0.0,0.0,0.3075190379238384,0.0,0.0,0.2502050514637173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679086051120705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084332265146052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21681264668005404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20177814652322545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30004292543444805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741282508412858,0.16794373065640947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.288667210170982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429702427951608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Weird____,2020/02/11,"I'm at a dead end, help me. \[Translated from French\]

​

Please help me, I'm in a real bind. If I publish this, it means I've already tried everything or almost everything. Sorry for the unstructured and incomplete text, I'm writing it right now. 

​

I'm literally going crazy because I can't find meaning in my life. And nothing has helped me so far (and I've already gone through stages of madness because of that). I'm suffering for no noticeable reason or almost no reason at all.

​

I already have a heavy course in psychiatry and a diagnosis (to be taken with tweezers) of atypical schizophrenia (I rather have negative symptoms). It doesn't help but I manage to live with it. 

​

I have an average background, I am in a middle class family. I am 19 years old, I have studied and I work as if nothing had happened. My work is very heavy because my colleagues see my irregularities, I am capable of the best as well as the worst. I try to hide my strange behaviour

​

Life is very paradoxical for me. I have to be the engine but it's as if it doesn't respond and outside help doesn't bring any fuel. It is as if I am oil and the world around me is vinegar in a vinaigrette. Today I started crying in despair in front of my current psychiatrist for no reason. After a few appointments he knows me quite well at last I think. He cried back. That's when I realized that I was really at a dead end. After all the years of care, I was at the same stage, nothing has changed. I'm still the same person completely removed from the outside world. As if I was running away from this world consciously and much more unconsciously.

​

I don't know, where to start so that you can help me. But in any case my biggest worry is that life offers too many choices, too many possibilities and too many interpretations. And what obsesses me the most is to find a philosophy of life, to find a goal. But in the end I can't find anything because there are so many choices and so I can't define what I want. I need an answer but the problem is that it has to come from me, of course. I don't know how to find it. I'm slowly becoming a body without a soul. All my troubles, inhibitions only accentuate this nausea about life and push me to mediocrity and sadness. Life is hard for me but it's just in my head, it's just nonsense. I'm just tired of not being able to live a normal life. It's just unbearable. 

​

Life in general is really strange for me.",3.4625077152812374,5.3389272000000005,4.772200099552017,82.13471627675463,73.93877551020408,7.637630662020907,29.298158287705327,8.407314429234152,2.2193663514186164,1968,85,380,35,41,652,213,490,0.156,0.778,0.066,-0.9905,1,0,0,0,0,0,87.0,0,1,0,6,24,12,1,1,27,0,38,12,2,4,3,72,64,38,2,10,20,0,1,0,0,0,10,0,0,1,23,17,0,0,18,0,0,8,14,8,2,0,6,3,48,4,61,55,11,53,1,3,1,0,13,26,0,11,17,260,71,6,0.04962673453607792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938801214186106,0.0,0.16429300682247325,0.0,0.0,0.37639382295206825,0.4221134006468064,0.06749576251554558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04083857405137003,0.044178315215821655,0.0,0.0,0.04662595070884956,0.0381598955827353,0.0,0.12100798701798572,0.05480882932058355,0.0,0.0,0.05208019616940293,0.0,0.0,0.055124114523119064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05059776330800917,0.0,0.052498504868998895,0.042749037551448994,0.052032686972941486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902527519190584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13186367041129482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920261810142285,0.0,0.04678366865434592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267896815093717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028204016885399263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043884757455446025,0.0,0.044455806460261066,0.0,0.05093134694727623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19958252443719196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182066634939375,0.04045241223892862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804226419178601,0.0,0.0,0.08764263159856267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20125487838238595,0.0,0.10811612497108833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036481360009277694,0.03679759484043175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0486236630919285,0.14285457068339613,0.05650036619310653,0.05207490978031208,0.0,0.0,0.03774336788099192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04333215040451829,0.0,0.054475251891927284,0.0,0.055946686635545084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047486082714131066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05278414085461766,0.0,0.05648608857691965,0.06358431381795031,0.1530736452721603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04238096013793983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039546082230273935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055553066312540235,0.07025211626407364,0.0,0.03963197430597819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05158117892026296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03179880765100468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057038630961655526,0.047040341638440834,0.0,0.0,0.06738659033117338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189450664870528,0.029271133813734286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924078855831204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047838401158627385,0.0,0.07225770758764084,0.05039835786040732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4221134006468064,0.06391597992965943
mentalhealth,NicholasCavernous,2020/02/11,"Advice / resources on memory problems I have always had a problem with memory - but specifically with names. Not in the way that many people seem to have, but an issue which at times has been quite debilitating - I have forgotten family members' names and the names of people I see every day. I have a very poor memory in general of anything from before about 12 years old, which I think may be linked to trauma and/or drug abuse. 

When meeting a new person I use mnemonics to help remember their names, which has helped a lot. I don't struggle with faces or other details, and usually have a pretty good memory when speaking to people - it's very rare I meet for the second time that I have forgotten, but I am basically completely unable to remember names without a mnemonic to help me. 

My problem, however, is that sometimes I have found I can create a sort-of false memory that I find difficult to overwrite or displace. I have been dating a woman for a few months now - I have never forgotten her name, but in my head I often replace her name with the name of an ex partner, or of a colleague. I have no strong feelings for this ex, whom I haven't spoken to in nearly 4 years, and no feelings towards the colleague - but for some reason I cannot recall my partner's name without also recalling these other two names. I'm not an expert on memory, but I would explain it like her name is a file in cabinet and stuck to the file - I can't take out that file without also taking the other names too. In practice my thoughts will be something like ""I should call Amy, Dana, Fran"" \[not real names\]. I have had similar issues in the past where I can't help associate another person, or arbitrary bit of information, with someone's name.

I have spoken to my partner about memory loss, although I don't know to clearly explain some of the nuances of my situation - and I am worried I will one day use the wrong name with her, which would be especially awkward to explain if I used the name of an ex. 

Does anyone here have similar experiences with memory loss and/or mnemonics? Has anyone ever managed to overcome embarrassing issues like this?",7.036554936817304,7.041758322660103,7.5992739344613405,72.02001392161063,64.29556650246306,10.410623259798673,34.15463696723067,10.074871250255047,3.469325251659884,1693,67,294,34,23,561,194,406,0.14800000000000002,0.763,0.09,-0.9708,1,0,2,0,1,0,49.0,0,0,1,4,12,16,0,3,26,0,40,3,2,4,3,81,58,21,0,7,17,3,2,3,3,6,1,1,0,6,18,13,0,0,16,0,1,0,15,11,0,3,7,4,41,5,51,42,5,32,0,2,1,0,43,14,0,11,20,216,59,1,0.0,0.11109971119660796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162897488813704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997242319117018,0.07802246249397601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832389214661487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13112948943800234,0.0,0.07716304962123982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797896359879849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102370337363052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574758108391404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831393235643177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094516661945175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205698228939644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874107564258816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481849702878383,0.07900355876111897,0.0,0.0,0.09172306715643498,0.0883960968200806,0.0,0.09482380591656288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570222567458011,0.0,0.0,0.10281173905729224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864812430217506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09623298910549044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514027745321944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2936081964572998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05153242397428398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374308809674428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971817477509949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095066003942758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484469891966036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231963894484375,0.09056168956697963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839371086623444,0.0,0.06353960309091437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951213726964011,0.1950207113748907,0.16374914891264192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539573551072714,0.0,0.2691698504590076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973377804171242,0.0,0.10672847808760302,0.0,0.0964090900185215,0.0,0.0,0.212441661688112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472093177449933,0.0853628380545409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539912681280324,0.0,0.0,0.0794492965483623,0.07218716426362662,0.09273891980261126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802664127524424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100368748860193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008272888236214,0.0,0.07444129406111996,0.10935371453977714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159768150496383,0.0,0.0,0.2429562587147987,0.10327217132870713,0.1547367905718786,0.0,0.07442864991128725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711669303948265,0.0,0.0,0.09522592496789564,0.0,0.13322015086543834,0.10252055506655362,0.0,0.12076699653368587
mentalhealth,7Royale,2020/02/11,"I want to raise awareness in my university, and i need your help. I want to raise awareness by making posters, but i dont know what to write or talk about, im confused and any help would be appreciated.",3.668943089430893,4.836622073170737,4.705853658536586,85.66577235772358,72.17073170731706,7.417886178861789,28.300813008130078,7.793537801064563,1.4605544715447154,159,6,35,2,3,52,30,41,0.067,0.6579999999999999,0.276,0.802,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,12,8,4,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,6,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23135879031301745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3987310383920308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.456079707332461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3674920486271956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18697401321888732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22709706113873102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522661189804325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27345302181574965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40133684591984703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24167993981193986,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tcrumpen,2020/02/11,"If a friend whom is suicidal asked you to keep quiet about it would you? Me personally having lost my brother to suicide could not in good faith keep quiet about something that severe

Normally i heed the persons wishes on not divluging their dark secrets. But when it comes to thinking about taking your own life thats where i draw a line

Having seen first hand what it does to a family and to friends i wouldnt allow anyone i know to get to that stage

Id also hope people would do the same for me if i ever go down that rabbit hole.

I abide by the motto of ""You can be pissed at me all you like but you're alive and thats what matters""

Im not sure id believe them when they would say ""i legit want to die"". I would think thats the depression talking",4.240000000000002,4.560716343949046,5.113891719745227,86.36192038216564,70.27388535031847,7.808662420382165,25.25414012738853,7.554174236665415,1.083543184713376,594,15,127,6,10,194,103,157,0.147,0.745,0.107,-0.8174,0,0,1,0,0,2,8.0,0,5,3,2,8,10,1,0,7,0,12,3,2,1,3,32,27,9,3,12,7,1,1,1,2,5,1,3,0,2,12,3,0,2,4,0,0,2,4,3,0,1,2,5,20,7,18,18,3,12,1,2,1,0,18,5,1,3,5,87,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117702178719829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291376422982536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375962213192311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582482089955036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678510780314536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11751363592702326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267684880091159,0.0,0.15275269966453886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288008206992154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13313543494997654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875101788266642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12519377056666772,0.0,0.0,0.22742641587973506,0.0,0.07689703411900595,0.0,0.08364748134957417,0.1234501035006142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14618591244107226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15898287889411356,0.0,0.0,0.2616459967479516,0.0,0.0,0.08088791855760702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039596939557111,0.07190617123271179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16066761298231805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14420807391218135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203814868486674,0.2570290081392835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170458159622713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16627487737111513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330865139925644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3219885903425965,0.0,0.1387182200986407,0.0,0.11066328643488556,0.11830010693555312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18861782566178303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681233704099622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16925316730979287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182182743359076,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Droopybewbs,2020/02/11,"""hey did you hear someone"" advice on GF and mental health realtively new hear to Reddit, however ive been a long time lurker over the years. 

bit of a quick story 
i started dating this girl from my hometown. things have been going great with us, however she does have a history of physical and emotional abuse from previous exes.
anyway here recently she tells me she hears voices. specifically those of her most recent ex, his best friend, and even sometimes her father. often when we are hanging out i will see her just blankly stare somewhere (as if someone straining to try and hear something) and then she will look at me and say ""did you hear that?"" 
the things she tells me she hears is quite detailed. and she can tell me word for word what her ex and her friend say. things such as ""you're a piece of trash"" ""your bf is lying to you"" ""you will never be able to be anything in life"" etc. etc.

ive tried reassuring her that what she may here inside her home and around me aren't real. but i understand i have no idea what this is like. she is wanting to talk to a professional and i am completely supportive of that.

tl;dr; my GF hears voices and i need advice on how to help",3.4889473684210515,5.285014199134203,4.2208430166324895,86.45577580314425,73.67532467532467,7.287400318979268,23.8462064251538,8.032893268588372,1.2276701298701296,924,27,185,14,19,295,137,231,0.039,0.865,0.096,0.9059999999999999,2,0,1,0,1,0,31.0,2,5,0,2,11,8,0,1,7,0,23,2,0,1,1,30,38,18,0,3,3,3,0,1,5,4,2,11,1,1,12,15,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,4,14,39,7,25,28,6,21,0,0,3,0,49,7,0,4,13,135,51,1,0.08888599690721002,0.10531537158926853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17371673489971295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314560187686746,0.0791273821731011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328036992389817,0.0,0.09704048735130978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319527663034956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778473488566244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998478279250313,0.0,0.0,0.19826276500739856,0.058708362653410076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373462014385236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05051596042097002,0.0,0.0,0.09799712538533384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944816582157623,0.7012668498633698,0.0,0.05957841009050147,0.0,0.08915990221913221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034147126751154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278280828678641,0.043425208283735764,0.0,0.0,0.07866131018367853,0.07464185089169195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957617867287898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590784043631898,0.06855436046273444,0.0858466496966883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454119890444199,0.0,0.1011717241016212,0.0,0.0,0.1755283973186066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137142472659367,0.0,0.0,0.07083063142623218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15062563346703334,0.06842878299607602,0.08791052375028653,0.0,0.0629139661046386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086677594358308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144319737229414,0.23307083731741185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17715572021472306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051830139598846435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069551453984267,0.0,0.0,0.09253345751345048,0.106918910035235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05242726393264199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05723966776636118
mentalhealth,GorkedYoyo,2020/02/11,"Having a break down I'm going through a lot of stress and just lost it today. I wanted to break everything in sight, I was hyperventilating, I'm currently thinking of the easiest ways to kill myself. 
I am just so fucking tired of battling my own brain.",4.01561224489796,5.9032966326530625,5.5630102040816345,76.99716836734696,72.46938775510203,8.16530612244898,28.5765306122449,8.841846274778883,2.4011591836734696,201,8,37,4,4,68,38,49,0.287,0.6609999999999999,0.051,-0.9159,1,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,3,1,3,0,3,3,1,0,0,6,10,2,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,1,5,0,8,8,2,8,0,1,1,1,0,2,1,1,2,26,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322328390332503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674740091936341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275137018711762,0.0,0.0,0.16913946321901424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292630091263122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248780881152967,0.25301863861965124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34091294617782664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906974201210303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3420606172093239,0.2821008853701193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17553896245289632,0.23623014109368165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AllAbout-Chill,2020/02/11,"I want to help you all I thought that I would let you all know about my blogs that are aimed at helping people live more fulfilling lives. I want to help people that are feeling stressed, lost, and emotional. We do this by making blogs that help with meditation, sleeping, lifestyle, and most importantly mental health issues. If you would like more information about how to find my blogs please drop me a message or have a look at my profile. 
I really hope that I can help you live a better life. I wish you all the best.",6.3085333333333375,6.648945320000003,5.896000000000001,82.47633333333336,65.8,9.066666666666668,29.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.0773666666666664,412,13,82,6,6,127,64,100,0.057999999999999996,0.607,0.33399999999999996,0.9804,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,5,0,3,3,6,0,1,4,0,8,3,1,2,3,23,18,5,0,7,2,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,17,4,9,13,7,3,0,1,1,0,13,2,0,4,1,56,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612567745014242,0.1358998542243393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17284690857785534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769515371312273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044252986855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333348019363336,0.0,0.0,0.5149755650066294,0.0,0.0,0.15261913132794622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038120198954586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444756173180468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571278431881856,0.10853465918636633,0.0750705537038582,0.0,0.40705399902191386,0.0,0.1290357674120542,0.0,0.16773812959426213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102569296981251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548532199940496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21305710453972326,0.0,0.0,0.16867262522727758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843858231464253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537710520585369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17601710314807012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219889399877429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18126539345009066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17670150931771042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21831142505044085,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,faithyfooling,2020/02/11,"I thought I was doing okay. I have diagnosed General Anxiety Disorder and Depression. 

I have been having minor health issues the last 6 years consistently. 

Today I woke up feeling horrible.. Anxiety was at 9/10 and depression at a 7/10. Not to mention my new medicine has made me feeling very nauseous and sweaty today. 

Needless to say I fucked up at work and now may get written up. I have been an ideal worker for a year there. Not to mention I had an anxiety attack at work for the first time and no one knew. I was alone. 

I feel so worthless and helpless right now. I am embarrassed at how I managed things today and I am very upset about it. 

Sorry to the world!",2.6636314847942733,5.10157804651163,4.196279069767447,82.6514490161002,78.6124031007752,7.380083482409062,27.752534287418012,8.384062270229773,2.3131307096004767,524,23,96,11,13,174,80,129,0.28300000000000003,0.659,0.057999999999999996,-0.9835,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,5,6,10,2,2,7,1,15,3,0,2,0,19,25,9,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,7,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,8,0,2,11,4,15,2,15,13,0,21,0,4,0,1,3,10,1,1,11,71,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619805794416352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35893083746559856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17792466473154575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694097694754349,0.15874010808939307,0.0,0.0,0.17924501433139267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372377325958253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303158141990712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14458691187704928,0.08171120662832353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16624316381086382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16323829262024495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274847865877116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14798703798236792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510496208221662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597895202667486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13356255806589862,0.0,0.12437352054791465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17507412812162998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039035087933236,0.0,0.0,0.1241620965245708,0.09119660419162184,0.0,0.44473945430270095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580885323018905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277183960432129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20142964559813592
mentalhealth,datsalonekidd,2020/02/11,"Help!!!! So basically the last time I recall it before last night was when I was on the phone with my ex and I basically started acting funny like I was drunk/high and confused to somethings and a few minutes later I was back to normal and didn’t remember a thing. 

It happened again last night and by current boyfriend said I wasn’t connected to the real world I was in my own reality (basically i was talking to him as if he was dr. Phil and confused to some things). He thinks I’m possessed but Idek what’s going on idk what happened I don’t remember anything and when we’re we’re on the phone I don’t even remember him calling or me answering. Please help!

Ps: some girl that use to live with us a while back had something similar where she would be doing something normal and she’d just be in her own world and having conversation with another person and after a while she’d snap back. Idk what it is but I want to know what’s going on!",1.6703125000000014,3.962858739583337,3.4571250000000013,87.37537500000002,81.39583333333334,6.34,23.6625,7.554174236665415,1.17465125,746,27,152,12,20,249,105,192,0.037000000000000005,0.89,0.073,0.8083,1,0,3,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,0,10,3,0,2,8,0,20,1,0,1,0,34,31,20,0,5,5,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,2,10,13,0,0,6,0,0,3,4,2,0,0,11,1,21,1,19,15,5,30,0,0,0,0,20,9,0,6,19,107,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644876139462675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070828495128159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001772552810566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072788886809244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287349148008135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859471875525999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790753918083036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23014049768715186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744418190084411,0.13748557022658148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151400610208558,0.3182108831784443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357313255194598,0.0,0.1149038984388977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442294170695009,0.25499227231026034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11362125756391515,0.0,0.14283959065706636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811220673477354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4422231612241544,0.0,0.12377990078195338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30053272721369073,0.0,0.0,0.09210405809468113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045905831195467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17290025047140153,0.08337967261286587,0.0,0.0,0.07587768637456188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565259053121308,0.11238733486151332,0.0,0.0,0.07675185752820017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243798318769164,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonoymous3567,2020/02/11,"Scared about tinnitus Hey guys, so I’m just gunna be up front and say I’m a super big hypochondriac. It used to be not to bad when I was young but as I grew up it got worse and any little thing I freak out about. However, the main thing that’s got me freaked out is my tinnitus. I do have undiagnosed tinnitus (constant ringing for years because I played drums for years as a kid without ear protection), however sometimes I hear swooshing and water drops in my ears. A couple days ago I was doing some work and I notice the swooshig got prominent when I was my myself in a completely quiet room and it scared the hell out of me (the thought of auditory hallucinations and hearing voices or other things have always scared the shit out of me). So basically, that’s where my mind went that I was hearing things or voices, but I’ve sat alone in my room so many times to try and listen and I cant hear any voices but more, like I said, water droplets or swooshing. I know I should probably go to the doctor but my anxiety now is scaring the shit out of me, “what If you’re hearing things, what if you’re crazy?”. I’ve always heard these droplets or swooshing with the ringing but to a much less degree. I’ve been been focusing on it and it’s gotten worse when I’m in my room at night, on my phone about to go to bed or studying. Could anyone give me any insight on what they think? Thanks",4.234843603671099,5.006595537366554,5.043375163888367,85.24574826746583,70.49466192170819,8.193369544858589,27.600861584566392,8.371475516178862,1.6963409252669042,1090,36,229,16,19,354,144,281,0.131,0.772,0.09699999999999999,-0.8854,2,1,0,1,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,2,12,14,3,4,13,0,17,7,4,1,0,39,42,29,0,4,15,0,0,1,0,1,1,17,4,2,18,15,2,1,4,2,0,5,3,10,0,0,15,17,29,4,35,23,5,39,1,0,0,0,15,21,3,8,13,148,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449057229623741,0.0,0.0,0.09871709884312148,0.0,0.0,0.15861863462939527,0.0,0.0,0.1944514291344916,0.0,0.07291534800463109,0.0,0.0,0.06664612955503532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958364410164588,0.05810284758473016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999354622819547,0.10300113655891653,0.0,0.07610088954656959,0.10546370504822876,0.0,0.061469981147042524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975584515030172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143437410644553,0.10833887810238113,0.0,0.228695189798153,0.0,0.0,0.09437636154082196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5371319644853851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05238236828640945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0465658606469767,0.0955301904934707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663396452167364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624049552588314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006714027852327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944622157684294,0.0,0.0,0.10851621438547107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027651750608582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066593668322563,0.07579793308382023,0.3817058548060549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19567797307746448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426849887768493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775280542051869,0.0,0.0,0.3166136639051069,0.06107369669897453,0.0,0.07566908327798431,0.055578663943384635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471230343968733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232114359584349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883575162785127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187979734936916,0.0,0.06939010678960689,0.0,0.1942672805637592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275885357979542
mentalhealth,Koalase,2020/02/11,"Skipped first class of the semester because of mental health I'm a bit embarrassed about this but have body image issues and anxiety and my teacher emailed me to ask why I missed the class and if everything is okay. I've never seen this teacher before because they're new in the facility, so it feels too soon to open up about this.",8.823025641025644,7.076707199999998,8.290769230769232,74.21256410256413,61.615384615384606,11.743589743589745,38.5897435897436,10.504223727775694,3.865358974358976,268,11,51,5,3,85,51,65,0.102,0.862,0.036000000000000004,-0.5023,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,4,1,2,2,1,0,1,8,7,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,2,3,1,8,6,1,7,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,1,4,31,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20852275001370893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548252552262523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323241510477549,0.0,0.2319452767288395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29758647140680383,0.30277463517233694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24497708839158164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13782450334220658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231856182034042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897395102654837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845024232946697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27469625989061625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102302944522454,0.26325920512793705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245960812382666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Crusty_Controller0,2020/02/11,"Any advice to boost confidence? I’m honestly not sure how I feel right now, but I’m just gonna lay out the gist of my situation right now... I’m 17, gay, I haven’t had a boyfriend before, I’m trying to get over a crush, and I have social anxiety and am just feeling empty right now... I just need some advice about how to deal with this properly...",1.011272015655578,2.8678159589041097,3.1867318982387483,90.78972602739726,81.1917808219178,6.911154598825831,20.01761252446184,7.957251820313856,0.7052324853228971,267,7,61,5,7,91,50,73,0.11199999999999999,0.775,0.113,0.0307,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,2,1,16,13,5,0,1,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,5,2,8,11,1,8,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,3,34,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4517633657759765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719311242478798,0.0,0.17683270131880094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966956115790772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23831033025605666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23375750830374356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076878234924605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17139826996936414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5922145139199735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598275509298839,0.0,0.2356330913509397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21786055499931048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569388577158686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,filledwfluff,2020/02/11,"I dont want to be depressed anymore I guess I've just had one bad thing after the other happen at the beginning of adulthood and it's all just left me feeling so hopeless. I have suicidal thoughts, but I dont want to kill myself. This past weekend I kept imagining what would happen if I walked into traffic. 

I was drinking a lot and it got out of control and I know that's a large part of the reason that I could be feeling this way. I guess when I drank I was able to feel happy w the absence of that worthless feeling. I felt like a more functioning human. I feel like I'm making my bf depressed and that's also making me feel worse. I told him how I felt because my drinking started effecting our relationship but he doesnt know what to do. I told my mom, but shes bipolar and having a manic ep so she didnt care. 

Noone checks in on me even when I do ask for help. I feel like the world expects me to be stronger, but unfortunately, I'm not. I'm actually weaker than the front I put up. I'm angry now w how my life has turned out. I keep taking my anger out on ppl, then I feel shitty because I know that ppl resent me for that. It feels like I'm going to be this angry lowlife for the rest of my life... 

I guess I'm just venting. Apart of me feels like I have to let these thoughts out so that I can peel thru the layers that make up my depression. But then another part of me feels like I'm obsessing over my own illness and feeding it by thinking of it so often... I know. I need help.",1.4593261455525592,3.079519968553459,3.3480907457322573,91.28674528301887,78.87421383647799,5.926504941599282,23.62129380053909,6.7097532225279775,0.6103293800539079,1162,39,260,11,28,391,156,318,0.193,0.669,0.138,-0.9656,0,0,2,0,0,2,29.0,1,0,0,2,15,18,3,1,12,0,22,8,0,8,1,64,73,23,2,7,10,1,13,6,1,1,4,0,0,1,21,11,4,3,23,3,1,4,5,10,0,1,13,13,48,8,34,53,7,31,0,5,0,0,14,15,0,6,17,174,69,0,0.08389736094922001,0.0,0.0818717219466253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670926892398096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08797369810091568,0.0,0.0,0.08320363816823842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843270717628606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005079199749073,0.1022861050549874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553895095372792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409802424195167,0.06698521592755909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167820221486678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19665416439509148,0.16437494734267594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05541341565210391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4666312918252292,0.29968145712804073,0.16110924674873767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04768080364288352,0.0,0.06710038372087129,0.0,0.2772672052730226,0.0,0.14838031842421154,0.08931030079553243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246926512758727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07457182926255035,0.09281999946214653,0.0,0.184431181888608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115472815169263,0.08579073579068992,0.11851837435633104,0.2459280764423837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132653608100771,0.0,0.0,0.16800641972186653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825957515686937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062208830084246075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05685102305995887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817053323397292,0.08008952421029802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434002036054965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08626046014153255,0.0,0.09007436794862246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059382983897204915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177009578574932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308037427841591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05573767867541364,0.05375804126930173,0.0,0.13321026633504607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603350474587938,0.0,0.0,0.0912562369790834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896967438703727,0.06659382002078078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854985783593229,0.05959827808544504,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scotgirl007,2020/02/11,"Anyone taking sertraline? Hi. Just started taking sertraline 50mg, was taking propranolol before but stopped due to my low blood pressure therefore making it make me dizzy. 

Took my first dose today, and I thought it would be too soon for any proper effects or side effects, but I’ve been feeling crazy nauseous, dizzy, and like nothing around me is real. Is this normal?

Thanks :)",5.453781094527361,8.140556791044776,4.791865671641791,80.59635572139305,70.6417910447761,6.257711442786071,30.56965174129353,7.1686216300943375,2.1299771144278608,303,13,46,3,6,91,55,67,0.19,0.6559999999999999,0.153,-0.2755,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,3,4,4,0,1,0,0,6,2,1,5,0,18,16,5,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,4,1,5,2,3,10,0,10,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,7,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15581605556058695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602128162060928,0.0,0.0,0.20397401441775384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19497250146372289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585486265814553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948976087314508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194119933329194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3058917125920637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22449846057065326,0.21985613015396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607997654393313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16217918344919127,0.0,0.0,0.19156269186052716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5168310644267435,0.0,0.0,0.2109518464203804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819033905290497,0.0,0.0,0.21718816746862088,0.0,0.2545715313444688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16276716730178084,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thenamesbooboo,2020/02/11,"Does anyone else get anxious if they don’t keep themselves busy? I’ve been a SAHM for almost two years. I’m constantly running around doing something, I’m always keeping myself busy. I recently started a new job at a doctors office but it’s not busy at all, there’s a ton of downtime. I noticed that during that downtime I would start to feel anxious. Yesterday, I had a full on panic attack at work. At lunch I hurried home and started cleaning and that calmed me down a lot, but as soon as I got back to work and had nothing to do, I started getting anxious again. 

Does anyone else get like this? Do you have to stay busy to keep from getting anxious?",3.7650769230769257,5.261736892307695,4.547692307692311,85.61230769230772,72.38461538461539,6.123076923076923,30.69230769230769,6.2581,1.5999076923076934,516,23,97,3,10,166,82,130,0.142,0.8059999999999999,0.052000000000000005,-0.8883,1,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,2,5,4,1,1,6,0,9,2,0,0,1,16,24,8,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,5,4,1,3,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,4,1,11,2,17,19,4,22,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,3,13,64,16,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673451651395456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700097944004407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5267930115822129,0.0,0.1630259863938697,0.2388927832471359,0.0,0.10377779283398904,0.0,0.13262258828735174,0.0,0.08964012590804962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259777724476902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932097852887424,0.20403374611716088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19476939928534276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058944576690651174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24362562057332435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323686949089624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693572575614998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568417948458865,0.31085562527806304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05695338510231086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991091640174046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112590301650893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185828740748792,0.13272310791364966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13677739463423794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11510522118350125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974627835043991,0.0,0.0,0.3300537619954936,0.12425502864096652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387829269173225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697381480496932,0.0,0.0,0.08281259461719552,0.0,0.0,0.07507143823296013
mentalhealth,bunnyotakuu,2020/02/11,"My friend needs help but i dont know what to do To put it short shes been dealing with lots of things lately and shows severe signs of mental health issues like depression.
She goes to a psychologist and will be diagnosed in near future but as of now to her im one of the only people she really trusts.
And i want to be there for her i really really do but i dont know how to behave and how to sooth her.
Shes very open about everything although i think shes stressed out by the situation and vents by telling some ppl abt whats happening.
I really just need some advice how to help her as a friend.
Like what i can do for her or what i absolutely shoudnt do or say.",1.0883299798792765,3.0624333661971868,3.240362173038232,89.89633802816904,81.53521126760563,7.155734406438633,18.593561368209254,8.192908349453996,0.6755336016096583,526,12,119,11,14,179,81,142,0.077,0.759,0.165,0.9039,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,4,0,14,2,0,3,0,27,21,16,0,3,6,0,0,2,2,1,2,1,0,0,6,8,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,2,0,1,1,1,19,5,23,17,3,9,0,1,0,0,17,5,0,5,5,84,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15070892945206732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15900135987595293,0.13283556844269664,0.15653725203630608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36150600665765625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13860936576766578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23831093757383395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13638250820959233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393618692838074,0.0,0.0,0.20675033774677648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665917249800861,0.1609730147057837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951835287289416,0.0,0.17397487755874752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069513378669142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13111835849844802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542463424712918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22871486918953646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450826904187868,0.1172966532881736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692164666679617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550408253786704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952072976628357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264757386764386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17423271508723426,0.0,0.0,0.17335771339287126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17666661293242236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480127633791225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246162699018503,0.09882249320669777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725350295802432,0.09096713481232384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pendulous_potato,2020/02/11,"I feel like I’m addicted to basically everything Sex, porn, food, drugs. I just crave stimulation like some kind of glutton on a biblical scale. Is this what ADHD feels like? Am I depressed? Or does everyone else feel like this all the time as well?",2.9117021276595736,5.5718427234042585,4.144085106382981,82.09400000000002,79.21276595744679,8.866382978723406,26.421276595744683,9.3871,2.730722553191489,196,8,38,6,5,64,39,47,0.064,0.693,0.243,0.8095,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,2,6,0,1,1,8,6,2,0,0,2,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,3,6,4,6,2,2,1,1,0,2,0,1,0,2,5,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23078916944565964,0.25442768587528714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18234078803090226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18526404719470216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455100249580396,0.0,0.17685195644333954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20229273589780636,0.19026636674832048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32113249045433434,0.4537252421434765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25599393913857604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204576737693421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4137125284925643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12344660482372632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903477831271668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,themibbcat,2020/02/11,"Hm I feel very productive and happy and emotional in the early morning hours at work but then by the afternoon I lose all ambition and happiness I felt just hours earlier. It’s like clock work. I make plans and tasks for the day, easy ones, and when I get home I no longer have the urge to do any of it. I need some type of change I don’t know.",1.9448401826484023,3.3536670684931518,3.3796575342465762,92.50227168949776,76.94520547945207,8.154337899543378,21.755707762557076,8.841846274778883,1.1265269406392693,268,7,64,6,6,88,54,73,0.081,0.7170000000000001,0.20199999999999999,0.8567,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,4,2,4,0,0,4,1,3,0,0,1,1,14,9,8,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,1,2,8,3,7,8,2,10,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,9,37,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138348400975968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23549349695966296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14356603007968735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504080249912025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255908568319943,0.0,0.21374199297732416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630534410591807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4739482573638431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232975298794735,0.0,0.4384550595194442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234148312267284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875675615286946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490453765904596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485949346339756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16506363962748355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084734385961784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18367783806999813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3241277115331837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lunatic13x,2020/02/11,"Is it just me or does anybody dealing with mental health issues feel as if their happiness is determined by that happy pill ? I feel like as if I'll never be happy without my medication, and it stresses me out because I don't want to be addicted to antidepressants.",10.991176470588236,7.595935274509808,11.245196078431373,59.858382352941206,59.0,14.121568627450984,45.107843137254896,12.161744961471696,5.520560784313724,213,10,36,5,2,73,40,51,0.07,0.665,0.264,0.9132,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,12,8,6,0,3,5,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,6,4,8,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,3,2,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22834122316178124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276842599524622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21594302776356275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18329897908966128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21181752402986168,0.14963754873371687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6689189889719039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22264511821123048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186207728720982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233108535839268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21100790246261036,0.21108540288305666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615476906032377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399345724534926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354434285137385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20191099777043545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vodwuar,2020/02/11,"Suicide In the last 5 months I’ve had bad nights where I think of what it would be like to die. I have a good life and a lot going for me, but also I have severe anxiety and depression left over from the military and no medication I have tried have worked.

I’ve had multiple doctors tell me just one more medication or cocktail of medications but they never work.

My first medication was lexapro. It worked amazingly.....for two weeks. Almost instantaneous effect. I felt on top of the world, laughed easily at jokes and felt like I loved life.. and two weeks later it stopped, we tried to raise the dosage but the feelings never returned, after a year I tried another medication, and another and after months none of them did anything.

I’ve just been off mood medication for like a year and all I want is to feel, to feel anything.

On dark days I find myself seeking out nihilistic and depressing poetry and music on YouTube and while it makes me feel worse at least it makes me feel something, my entire adult life I have struggled with either feeing nothing at all or severe anxiety, depression and anger. 

The whole world can’t feel this way. There has to be something profoundly wrong with me.

I just want to have that sense of relief I had for those first two weeks on medication that has never come back...",5.634722485768499,6.852184431451615,5.801024667931689,79.45536053130931,67.58870967741936,9.383681214421252,29.10436432637571,9.627879704456738,2.57907229601518,1041,36,196,22,17,330,134,248,0.187,0.693,0.12,-0.9684,0,0,2,0,0,1,29.0,1,0,2,7,7,16,1,1,10,0,19,12,0,3,5,50,35,19,2,3,9,0,8,3,0,1,11,0,0,1,10,17,1,1,11,2,1,2,6,7,0,6,8,8,23,8,30,24,8,41,0,3,0,1,6,16,0,4,25,135,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061843157620194,0.0,0.0,0.06438325586309783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688420356444264,0.12317878394943982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250458347554914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06190667998471853,0.06722190026496977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935163073532108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05192183630946108,0.0,0.2080276190544457,0.0,0.083555939688176,0.0,0.0,0.08240467712894144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442475181103125,0.0,0.15460310166223373,0.0,0.07358403906843469,0.1369623340965705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045755288921648964,0.06752737873208929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562582262982594,0.0,0.0,0.08747358694692572,0.0,0.1705982926110176,0.11799832775308207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844612541789702,0.0726627839926504,0.0,0.10748116205759684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5677325282684166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12852350580209135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862811996647208,0.0,0.0,0.07555252154874086,0.0,0.07725084198651473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05455518336230868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18190517949327006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395998058635573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730937740542434,0.0,0.08416579784910405,0.0,0.08806410392101406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036867432127401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05158710680636668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16398158403690732,0.0,0.2359376546426775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497293879475717,0.06390453269765496,0.1937391058418936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988575514237536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17583518161202505,0.0,0.08204585192231634,0.0571914947880565,0.08802427789891644,0.0,0.10369069555854096
mentalhealth,SmallBear91,2020/02/11,"Completely, utterly broken. I am so unbelievably, soul crushingly, devastatingly, relentlessly sad.

I am so sick of hearing 'things will get better'. I know the people saying it are trying to help and maybe even genuinely believe it but surely at some point that's just not true. When do I pass the 'enduring' it phase of life? I am 28 and have been dealing with mental health issues since I was 10.

Life just honestly is not worth living. Even without the unbearable pit of depression that I am constantly in, there are the voices (I have schizo affective disorder). Even if their not saying awful, degrading, confusing things and trying to get me to do things that can only be described as insane, they are still always there! It is so incredibly draining and frustrating (not to mention terrifying) and just plain annoying to hear them talking talking talking all day, every day. 

The sadness, anxiety, delusions, hallucinations, self harm, paranoia and everything that goes with it is too much to bear. I can honestly say that say that I have never felt more suicidal (and that includes the time I actually tried to kill myself). I'm not planning on doing anything, but that is only because of my husband.

I have tried everything I can think of to improve my life. I see the doctors, talk to the therapists, talk to family and friends, I take the medications they prescribe, read the books they suggest. I try meditation and exercise, I quit the job I hated, I tried not working, I got a new better job. I got a dog, tried socialising more, tried socialising less tried loosing weight and eating healthy. I tried to fill my life with material objects, religion, spirituality and any other bullshit you can think of. Nothing helps. I just have come to the conclusion that this is it. This is my life and nothing will fix me.

I not sure the point of making this post, or what I hope to gain from it. I guess just to get everything off my chest. It's exhausting pretending I'm not of the brink of a complete meltdown that will perhaps end with me back in the psych ward (or morgue).",5.983984405458092,7.535034115789479,6.5430994152046775,73.21928849902534,67.05263157894737,9.945419103313839,33.284600389863556,10.168813456921066,3.6308693957115015,1644,73,282,41,27,536,202,380,0.165,0.716,0.11800000000000001,-0.9614,2,0,0,0,0,1,59.0,0,1,5,7,17,20,4,1,18,1,31,14,1,2,5,52,51,22,2,2,19,1,2,0,1,3,11,7,0,1,26,17,2,0,5,4,1,3,10,11,0,0,5,10,41,9,35,42,6,22,1,3,1,0,25,8,0,7,10,200,67,7,0.0,0.0,0.07220830994060053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06156965152324991,0.0,0.0,0.050319042517634784,0.0,0.056605865733629995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608914654035405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05689748027822957,0.0,0.04510658015256145,0.0,0.0,0.08336686888401101,0.0,0.13088488193031994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374002034998537,0.15516440680229032,0.07996215702207175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544112713381712,0.07628545205047506,0.06373166490487038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480452072305879,0.07573687513100673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571521510723296,0.0,0.0,0.0655374835462606,0.0,0.0,0.1466187224527788,0.0,0.062343861325759226,0.0,0.19950542814725697,0.0,0.06975576908570437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104667000355584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057168245653922624,0.0,0.11597778172518212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836089896847753,0.0,0.08151368107200199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305460551977544,0.0,0.07865307653355537,0.16679517108507536,0.0,0.09919439046877344,0.0,0.0,0.07349359238896322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723140987183261,0.14685696286235314,0.0,0.08186434986940347,0.0,0.040665640186504017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613237912217513,0.0,0.0,0.0653388174516844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049392143949270766,0.0,0.07433778293642734,0.0,0.0,0.07454203727849593,0.07456941558595545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05439473640986532,0.0,0.05706939803989225,0.07146469734182223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420001285641335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255285146085656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05129871943435685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989812081050626,0.0,0.07086662227028467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870264232687467,0.07401488453916005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353747319566733,0.0,0.0,0.058964323654917376,0.0,0.07719277715907719,0.0,0.0,0.061209313230055885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059092391161623285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093836751224125,0.0,0.13947856061659247,0.0,0.05563492630623354,0.2973713298877889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591373616954454,0.14747669212775485,0.09482583762691554,0.0,0.0,0.043146998196236484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5023765311506445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901058057320018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132840498904562,0.0,0.05386913970327978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,0616Eagle,2020/02/11,"Seeking Help for Depressed Little Brother My (25F) little brother (14) was recently hospitalized for a few days for expressing suicidal ideations. He has his first outpatient therapy appointment in a couple days, but I have remained worried about him nonstop ever since my mother called me to let me know he was being hospitalized. 

I was never suicidal as a teenager, but I did go through a horrible 6-8 month stretch in my early 20's where I was suicidal and had a plan in place, and I'm so incredibly glad I'm not in that headspace anymore. It terrifies me that my little brother (who I've always been so close with) is experiencing similar horrific feelings. 

I feel absolutely completely helpless, but I want to help him in any way I can. Normally he enjoys coming over to mine and my husband's home to spend the night, or just going out to eat with us, but he hasn't seemed super enthused about even going out with us for a few hours. 

Does anyone have any advice on how to try and be there for him without making him feel suffocated? I don't want to seem like a third parent for him (although often that's what our relationship has been like!) Thank you in advance.",7.546509715994017,7.181141165919286,8.061087443946189,70.36753550074738,63.34977578475336,11.200149476831093,37.41741405082212,10.686352973137794,4.0776041853512695,932,42,165,21,12,310,138,223,0.192,0.71,0.098,-0.9828,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,3,1,0,4,11,9,0,0,8,0,19,1,0,2,2,33,35,14,3,3,8,6,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,11,1,0,6,0,1,5,5,2,0,2,8,4,27,7,31,24,2,33,0,2,0,0,26,17,0,4,12,116,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11619829421008235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894334257191284,0.0,0.0,0.16172689429086395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11792759853260912,0.08314522241428884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214212601447839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243115744528428,0.12467575077478922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13157258000449668,0.0,0.15337530591487578,0.0,0.10241773012114158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405967524677896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216754729143152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785394867124506,0.10756166031803567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18037467697522566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114549765571916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20273930780552965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594068557243294,0.0,0.11927726543768948,0.0,0.11710322220095035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06535028651835108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12159438782814727,0.0,0.11618765759558312,0.35753969460296564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937390740775092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491349603931544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171136852222772,0.0,0.0,0.1115897657790163,0.11650737361611002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203641292601764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242365163351592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741010654860852,0.12766573836645678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165039210135995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836427359388214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3902074687373033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109477123020951,0.13598490589556048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073265316916273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860701928819431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402733856952049,0.09438588798586102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462580403389545,0.0,0.0,0.12075972757913428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shxzun,2020/02/11,"How to ask to get diagnosed I’ve been experiencing “panic attacks” (I’m putting them in quotation marks because I’m not sure that they are actually panic attacks, but everyone around me says they are) recently and I’m not sure how to ask to see a professional to actually diagnose me,, I feel like asking my parents would come off as attention seeking and I get really nervous when I think about asking them about it, and I don’t want to be that person who self diagnoses themself with anxiety. What do I do???????",2.982857142857142,5.539468510204087,5.209551020408163,75.16759183673472,78.18367346938777,9.226122448979591,30.20816326530613,9.642632912329526,3.5415191836734694,406,20,73,13,10,141,64,98,0.182,0.7709999999999999,0.047,-0.8891,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,4,0,6,8,2,3,1,0,8,3,0,2,2,18,22,8,0,2,3,1,1,1,0,1,3,1,0,2,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,1,4,12,3,13,19,0,7,0,0,1,0,13,3,0,0,3,48,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.2636199966112861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332909152114103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024199687607265,0.5050933218066704,0.30732595887935593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233814443757677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635187115228796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41128324736308336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906631148943318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829605267898302,0.09649488594372453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113824503268207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598896128489372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169538801935459,0.14998057317066427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793895417061105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578385401579035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653006374411384,0.0,0.133366506147481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741403256052401,0.0,0.0,0.10763425161787428,0.0,0.14090871029824334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546059983078132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654816535116769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796684881122324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959506988088402,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rykla,2020/02/11,"Need some advice So I'm really sure how to explain this but I'll try the best I can:
A couple years ago I started feeling horribly lonely, even tho I had friends and family I always felt lonely, a feeling like something was missing, feeling empty.
That faded away when I met this girl from my school and we started dating, full of hope and dreams I put everything I had on this relationship and I started loving her more than everything.
That feeling of emptyness eventually started catching up to me, even tho I hoped that this girl would ""cure"" me, it didn't go as I expected and eventually I felt like shit again
Last month she broke up with me and I had a breakdown, and now that feeling is stronger than ever, I can't find any motivation to do things, I can't focus on any hobbies or school, nothing really makes me happy like it used to and I just don't know what to do.
Any advice?
(Sorry if the story seems a little rushed)",2.226507437070936,4.631436027173912,3.8346681922196812,84.81856979405038,80.03260869565217,6.4823798627002285,24.35812356979405,7.669130373188453,1.4213195652173916,735,27,140,12,19,244,110,184,0.126,0.619,0.256,0.9801,0,4,1,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,2,11,15,1,0,6,0,13,2,1,4,2,37,37,17,0,6,4,0,7,3,1,1,0,0,0,2,12,10,0,0,12,1,0,4,4,5,0,0,8,7,23,10,17,28,4,25,0,4,0,1,10,7,1,6,17,97,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381200875577345,0.10800326966932283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138013452195108,0.0,0.0,0.2485648939003928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144721195228696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786292504587704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13481296986263894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16094753868672138,0.11021070553100937,0.0,0.0,0.21900277862046666,0.0,0.11485933538084747,0.0,0.3080282873809177,0.08704208601329391,0.2339698466403459,0.0,0.11135899701179476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413281204929416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924413428244965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12970029841380046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420280153796541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695974348615942,0.09931536619421967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17857371780627054,0.12211507917419526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996480823756948,0.0,0.08132874028065203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725104030542403,0.0,0.0,0.09034236537140557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690818268258345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248224125941465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561068688250164,0.0,0.0,0.13080990992424468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24661593886491295,0.0,0.11091800653963016,0.0,0.0,0.1250663850431336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379791652140797,0.0,0.1363892242434002,0.3449541951404853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483218508146485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094467819164816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272094944291013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523011538016144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655120835756451,0.0,0.0,0.0784605738081028
mentalhealth,nolosfxx,2020/02/11,"This is going to be a long post... i need advice or help before i lose everyone i love. Soooooo, last year i stopped being able to work.. my left leg would give out after walking about 5 steps and go completely numb. Not only would it go numb but along the bones from my left lower back to my foot would flair up so bad i felt like i was going to throw up. After multiple scans, xrays, and test's the doctors found out what was wrong. I was diagnosed with spinal stenosis, spondylolisthesis, sever arthritis of the lower back, and multiple herniated and buldging disks in my L3 and L2 vertebra (i believe). I haven't been able to leave the house without constant pain bringing me to tears and sweats. Standing or sitting uo straight for longer than 5 minutes causes my heart rate to sky rocket along with previous described ailments. They prescribed me 1800 mg of gabapentin a day, as well as cymbalta  (cant remember dosage). Later on i was given vicodin and acetaminophen for inflammation and pain with no change to the ammount of pain. In 6 months ive underwent physical therapy, 2 epidurals, and have had every doctors say ive exhausted their options and good luck on getting better. Im losing my mind, ans this is where the mental health comes in. I feel like everyone hates me, like im a burden. My girlfriend moved up here from Arkansas to escape an abusive relationship and other problems as well. I love her to death but everything she says i take as a personal attack. When i have these panic attacks it feels like i can't turn off this switch till i see her crying and breaking down. Im the same way with my friends and family as well and i was never like this before. Being 26 years old (going on 27 in may) and being stuck inside just gives me so much time to think. Think about how yelling and screaming were a daily problem growing up. My parents screaming and throwing things. Hitting each other and me if i got in the way to protect them.. i never saw myself as an angry person but the more i think back all i remember is yelling and screaming and cussing and violence... my mother has been in and out of the hospital due to stress and her stomach ulcers. My father due to cancer which he was diagnosed last year as well. My cousin died from a heart attack last week the same night a family friend was killed in a head on collision. I am fucking afraid guys, im afraid of life and death and everything... ive never had a surgery and they already have 3-4 planned out for me in the next 3 years if you dont include the epidural shots... i dont know what to do ive always been happy and joyful and fun loving but i just hate everything and everyone and i just keep telling myself that all this pain can go away if i just killed myself that everyone in my life would be so happy if i was gone... nothing is helping i dont feel like anything will and all ive ever known was fighting and illness and its just getting to be to much.. im.obseesing over everything and having a panic attack 3-4 times a day and now the fighting and screaming and losing my mind has spread to my girlfriend. No i would NEVER hurt her but i feel like the mental fucking im doing to her because of my own securities and this fucking tic in my head that i cant turn off is just making her hate herself. I feel like if i slapped her once a week she would feel less pain than the hell ive put her through. Long story short life is hell, we all die, and im fucking terrfied. Im going to the doctor tomorrow to get set up with a psych and hopefully getting on working depression meds because i feel like im just months away from ending my life i keep pushing my loved ones away so that they dont have to find my dead body hanging from the ceiling in my livingroom. I just hurt so bad every day and i have so much anger anxeity and depression and i dont know what to do.. thanks for any advice or just listening it means the world to me",4.489946274901347,5.501565543003854,5.092850520610472,84.24351958826605,70.0783055198973,7.875633528265108,29.18844197213901,8.10692912299908,1.909543697998384,3094,115,610,41,54,994,342,779,0.228,0.618,0.154,-0.9978,3,0,0,0,6,0,73.0,1,1,5,7,31,77,18,5,35,0,63,42,11,3,9,132,121,72,7,15,24,4,8,9,4,8,23,9,0,3,22,57,0,5,19,0,0,19,17,48,4,1,22,20,93,29,94,84,13,106,2,7,3,8,45,39,6,12,50,406,115,7,0.08233937200243789,0.048779345794570016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08046108136070247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045431772251440364,0.0,0.03425647678779678,0.0,0.0,0.02799679824951733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03387914369441622,0.0,0.0,0.18734584510092775,0.1160408256640064,0.09497084184564253,0.06874993630416942,0.05019331692626591,0.0,0.07006474099276715,0.046384137933897424,0.0,0.03641124164903233,0.0,0.04573024010600964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042292608235195664,0.04355206888373605,0.035464039076921416,0.04316563248622353,0.04448980476841547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04522296689281608,0.07965312476292356,0.0,0.07091878045263605,0.08357272935231007,0.08545526842820657,0.0,0.0,0.12641675439364164,0.0,0.0,0.2412528268880333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03646412198687372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037240337997107915,0.06937447218004858,0.15735759704919408,0.14800263656487067,0.0,0.07762223190745167,0.0,0.14571641177010128,0.17646979143217822,0.0395293548300824,0.0,0.037628347153365584,0.0,0.0,0.045140435714920914,0.06361519455744008,0.15224284523457948,0.08603784687804261,0.07898742846961096,0.16378376917195256,0.034531179335300165,0.03292715881756537,0.0,0.0,0.04076446183001935,0.0,0.0876517925909961,0.0,0.12193962461935373,0.08450395058389909,0.04376145103798571,0.0,0.09757255227150803,0.055190345413763095,0.0,0.0,0.040890787578578565,0.0,0.047504290097555774,0.08814600071200765,0.0,0.4002329307141379,0.0,0.0,0.0731870171013824,0.09109631552779876,0.0,0.04525156549193148,0.10067636680736022,0.0,0.043592753041908266,0.08946196860239973,0.0,0.1163174670196925,0.18102086117127444,0.0,0.0,0.0728677531532268,0.0,0.13817504351257995,0.0,0.0,0.1486289959518324,0.0,0.027481085093664672,0.0,0.0,0.04484585736234934,0.04573024010600964,0.0,0.08297872055147919,0.0,0.08313929340600945,0.0,0.06572250116891504,0.04375686081207606,0.09079336876704086,0.0305268005107067,0.12701039949910126,0.0,0.04378442812220084,0.03863496140112916,0.0,0.03950342407074122,0.0,0.04320065997166635,0.04384437195810073,0.027897644714274226,0.0313114013810294,0.21903724291992052,0.09660751203608596,0.04571406420049582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718955636548961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03942917883683075,0.0,0.0,0.07878765883124704,0.0,0.04138690557479952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04420083544043255,0.09327445737747216,0.0,0.0,0.06547957347673862,0.0,0.0,0.03280690948575625,0.0,0.0,0.04651002669615787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034419700953527525,0.04715973621654699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03095448024227626,0.0,0.035984120192430025,0.03790351554816567,0.047081123916106436,0.0,0.027351310023833952,0.07913961729156027,0.0,0.0,0.048012749970310915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895615923927728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06535716091324137,0.06604767758600005,0.0,0.14806596798247615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03968610816150407,0.0,0.05994404347496232,0.0,0.0,0.175474582315613,0.04501258871675052,0.0,0.10604771193443324
mentalhealth,kolovon,2020/02/11,"I Feel Alone All the kids that go to my school are dickheads
Its war 
Yes I have friends but they just roast and don't take anything seriously and make fun of you for your thoughts
The good friend is A but I have 2 other ones but they are going to a different school so I feel alone",-0.17450000000000188,2.1076715500000027,0.9050000000000012,101.9325,91.83333333333334,4.333333333333334,17.5,5.985473137389443,-0.6219999999999999,223,6,54,2,8,69,45,60,0.10099999999999999,0.631,0.268,0.9083,1,2,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,2,2,0,2,6,1,0,4,1,6,0,0,1,1,11,13,6,1,0,4,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,2,0,1,1,2,9,4,4,12,1,2,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,35,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4928751277291472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958071134700362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486001704298878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406226272277131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3676689036618148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27045739293656473,0.19957560354383086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15882904230846265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16123658063456187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48162277262316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890379638504092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889004515066475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_-_flora-farroway_-_,2020/02/11,"This probably isn't good. Very not good. I finally got the courage to see a psychologist. Now I'm afraid to be honest with her. This is gonna be really fun.   
What am I even supposed to do now, not being able to be open with family, friends, or professionals?",1.0187179487179492,3.4000906153846167,3.4476923076923067,85.78064102564106,85.15384615384616,8.082051282051282,22.128205128205128,8.841846274778883,1.848682051282052,200,7,43,6,6,69,39,52,0.083,0.69,0.22699999999999998,0.8549,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,2,0,8,0,0,0,0,6,12,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,3,6,6,6,0,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,3,28,6,1,0.3091339754882075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20418007529800145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914239998710175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33864115979798504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388361426222072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5185738237547656,0.24724268012401635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3332987107584391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980391405255877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463397547533722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550679049067299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,queestionnacc,2020/02/11,"Does there exist a disorder / condition where one’s environment must be consistently changing or there will be negative effects on mood? Every month or two I need to rearrange my bedroom or I begin to feel stressed, and on a greater level, living in the same area for too long makes me depressed.",4.728888888888889,7.374531888888887,5.447925925925926,75.2396666666667,72.7037037037037,8.764444444444445,33.022222222222226,9.3871,3.6013155555555554,238,12,39,6,5,77,46,54,0.20600000000000002,0.7509999999999999,0.043,-0.8625,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,3,0,4,0,0,2,1,11,8,4,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,0,1,4,0,6,4,2,9,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,3,3,30,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.321501057100408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617609618576441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34831214510838826,0.0,0.26595747290017485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560609256153797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366821377493295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683619159851403,0.26895461303840074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028651711464124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24258151383687365,0.0,0.0,0.2253486202982779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059402112490728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3481328312248851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2968801339861515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Omynakat,2020/02/11,"What is wrong with me I dont know what I feel. When I'm ""depressed 
"" or sad I get this gaping hole in my chest that pulsates, I can feel angry or anxious, it's either I dont feel happiness or I dont recognize it. When something good happens, I just feel excited then it immediately goes away. Im CONSTANTLY worrying about about future. I dont really get suicidal anymore like I used to, but when I do get suicidal, I genuinely want to commit suicide and I get really close (which is why I'm writing this today.) 

I also get these random bursts of productiveness. Like wanting to start a buisness, I'll create a list of what I need to do, etc, then I abandon it. That goes for anything really. Like doing my homework, but doing it in class is easy because I'm really focused on doing it but after I'm done focusing I'll forget everything I need to do. 

My romantic relationships are pretty ridiculous because if I get into a ""romantic"" relationship with someone it's either because I actually like them or I'm bored. And if I actually like them, I'll be really excited to see them and then after I do see them I lose interest and get annoyed by them really easily. 

My family relationships are.. idk.. I dont really have a connection with my family, but I do. There would be fighting between us all and then some time later we will be fine ish. I dont talk to my mom, step dad, and younger siblings really. I also stay in my room a lot of the time unless I'm outside with friends. 

I've also had some things go down in the past few months, I was in a LDR with a guy for a year then he broke up with me, I had a job for about a month and there was an incident at school that led to the police taking my phone and so I just didnt show up for work; so I lost my job because I had incriminating things on my phone (they didnt look through it through.)  I dont feel like this is relivent, but it did happen.",1.99589331384728,3.8219697365728926,4.550488856412134,82.33538618925833,77.97698209718669,8.151435878699306,24.98217025940811,8.922882184376627,2.0149344683960546,1481,54,305,36,35,523,178,391,0.122,0.7090000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.9632,2,0,1,0,2,2,46.0,2,0,6,3,15,24,3,0,14,0,37,1,1,2,2,55,70,33,3,7,16,2,5,6,1,2,0,0,2,1,22,17,0,1,6,1,0,3,9,11,0,0,10,8,51,13,44,55,8,40,0,6,3,0,21,15,0,10,27,212,73,6,0.0,0.0,0.13294884947209482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16342448217169486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695520459089772,0.06755585263964108,0.0,0.0,0.05605622313228211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06400014587684595,0.0,0.0,0.16609910797903932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361255779380879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586708893409473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06970949963985941,0.5588456244418498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597081375300531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06122106342385082,0.0,0.12843326829854326,0.0,0.1722153429913147,0.04866430555750171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0526286551525671,0.0,0.24912596302191226,0.0,0.038713659829696094,0.05713507730006365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744862824226516,0.1204750074248019,0.07251405891104612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735803277391067,0.0,0.13519541078843336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03743648120479005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996773369272466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05720289588476901,0.07620785952480214,0.07436005501053128,0.05791243107713034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978027795261905,0.10874404688521026,0.0,0.0,0.10101891336910454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06502739801581456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930162379411109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3491107675413557,0.0,0.0,0.21940329275416756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894017568948957,0.10856422198871776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05771710056664151,0.052441418620846066,0.0,0.0,0.04821505642998601,0.07260590736990936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22353374939298346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05121709294237095,0.054751560044945566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051061924619756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944160129329964,0.0,0.06456895100662209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193890164558186,0.058833039547434726,0.0,0.0,0.08035683157465835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061466901225439324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04959152313282233,0.06917826244789807,0.0,0.048389861075253005,0.07447755290472934,0.0,0.043866473253309585
mentalhealth,youthprojects,2020/02/11,"persona changes? Heya there, my name's Anthony, and I'm what the female I'm livin' in calls a persona. This sounds simila to DID, innit? Well, her dissociation ain't related to whatever's goin' on. I was consciously created, like she's puttin' a character on for a play. She doesn't have amnesiac barriers, she has partial control over me (unless she can't get my accent outta her head, ahaha). None of the cons of DID are here. I'm sorta like an imaginary friend.

She's a Fantasy-Prone Personality, which means it can be hard for 'er to see the difference between reality and fiction. Because I come so naturally to her, because I feel so real when I ""front,"" she guesses I'm apart of her FPP self.

Anyways, thanks for readin', mates. I'd 'ppreciate any guesses to what this is, big or small.",3.0897759103641462,5.2802799803921605,5.099593837535013,77.96602941176472,75.99346405228758,8.815873015873017,29.22922502334267,9.424239791934726,2.9752636788048554,619,28,117,17,14,213,105,153,0.01,0.865,0.125,0.9388,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,8,0,12,1,1,1,0,15,24,7,0,0,2,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,6,3,0,2,3,1,0,2,4,0,2,0,3,4,17,6,17,20,1,10,0,0,1,0,16,7,0,4,3,71,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429949960505391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25636478470385776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147154644994093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22244429032630586,0.18113428837627785,0.0,0.0,0.23584258793389345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21969382693676565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063219420401484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624588357108343,0.0,0.1098606121392354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4632857828672262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18836613239962827,0.0,0.215803999662853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20546061571084467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290523773204224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18360502778313934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393402996553061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16756287095889572,0.0,0.2193638891503938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19359403199631728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18906351646155156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,healthanonymous2000,2020/02/11,"Someone please, please tell me it gets better. I’m getting desperate and ready to commit suicide (22M). *TLDR*: ... please help me...

I just need someone to understand. Or tell me it gets better. Hell even someone who can relate who’s crawled out of the hole and made it and is willing to share their secrets to getting back up again. 

Last summer I broke up with a horribly abusive girlfriend, and I came out blaming myself, and I’m ashamed of the treatment SHE put me through. I know that’s fucked up and backwards, but I just keep thinking of the situations where I should’ve been more firm with her, set better boundaries, said no, or told her what she was doing was wrong. I feel like a lot of this was my fault for letting her use me the way she did.

My family and I have a super strained relationship. My mother is pure definition of helicopter parent, and every time I try to tell her to start respecting me and stop crossing boundaries I’m uncomfortable with, she flies into these rages that I’m a shitty son and don’t respect her at all before turning the whole thing into a guilt trip.

I’ve always found it hard to fit in with people. I feel like they’re always going to double cross me and I’m always anxious of my appearance to them. By appearance, I mean nobody can know any of the bad about me (abusive relationships, suicidal tendencies, depression) because it’s less chance they’ll use it against me. 

I’m spiralling out of control, and I feel like revisiting the suicide note I wrote back when I was still in the last relationship, leaving it on my bed, and throwing myself off the train bridge. I live every single day remembering events, feeling guilty, and trying to think of other things positive, but I feel like I’m coming closer and closer to the edge. Please help.",5.83000797448166,6.6233743771929845,6.033545986177567,79.49320574162681,66.92397660818713,8.557363104731527,31.04253056884636,8.575989854853784,2.370223391812865,1415,53,261,20,22,451,188,342,0.19399999999999998,0.645,0.161,-0.9516,1,0,0,0,0,3,47.0,0,0,3,5,10,22,3,3,15,0,16,1,0,4,3,60,55,20,3,1,6,3,6,4,1,2,0,1,1,0,17,26,0,3,14,0,0,10,2,11,0,0,12,7,44,11,42,40,7,43,1,2,0,1,31,18,2,5,17,169,61,0,0.0,0.19433192706702745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047114523655777,0.0,0.0,0.05576819109514507,0.0,0.0,0.09264559588260587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126118041768244,0.0684731795296641,0.04999126087732969,0.0,0.06978269139728945,0.0,0.0,0.21758799676278132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379520209219183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064255314557415,0.0,0.0,0.09197884454377964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052888317722554035,0.0,0.07063329287279181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05416545124049885,0.0,0.13819040260178586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730975920293066,0.0,0.2073283172512657,0.23434586968124174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991744065274394,0.0,0.07581499150583226,0.17138299327467674,0.0,0.04660698522972839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346297952834037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993634708550526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289239860604255,0.0,0.0,0.09013880548830308,0.13369478449735658,0.0,0.08683453587577712,0.0,0.08385864436748003,0.0,0.1602596901424279,0.0,0.07241448714568291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972019260651405,0.0,0.07759786748296565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933065563138932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06080782628184325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106007927577693,0.0,0.0,0.05685395916166008,0.0,0.0,0.36008023546846585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824406004701604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26413741479702235,0.09289897575006653,0.0,0.07800830220599657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921803270418376,0.0,0.0,0.20845510851563365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058045620919548166,0.0,0.06549162300565516,0.06856228498368247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691100299515746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215035584433306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896482308565593,0.10509471502129043,0.0,0.0,0.04781947191754116,0.0,0.0,0.07836207255113165,0.0,0.11135597574658364,0.08920105711430329,0.0,0.08537312666423759,0.0,0.14165700774712012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509406194882708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155890304741393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966277596711228,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dragconbee,2020/02/11,"Really? So I’ve always taken interest in social issues. I live in an affluent area where people come to party, eat, and shop. At the same time you see people all dressed up eating an expensive meals while there’s literally a homeless dude in the ground tweaking out. I just don’t get it how people just continue on with their lives without being affected. I wish I was one of these people who could really give two fucks about anyone but themselves. How are people just okay with their minimum jobs barely able to afford any kind of life. It just seems like if you don’t join the rat race you get fucked over. I see it as be fucked over or be the one fucking people over. My sister for example works in a fancy salon were she talks people into buying creams for hundreds of dollars. I just think it’s wrong to fuck people over but at the same time I feel like If you don’t put your own needs first they don’t get met. How do I deal with this mind fuck?",3.466562500000002,4.978354614583335,4.336375,86.77112500000004,73.16666666666666,7.203333333333332,21.133333333333333,7.793537801064563,0.7650558333333333,754,16,152,10,15,243,123,192,0.145,0.775,0.08,-0.9601,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,5,3,2,12,12,6,0,9,1,12,10,0,4,1,32,32,12,0,5,11,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,7,3,0,3,1,4,2,5,7,0,4,4,4,18,5,28,24,4,24,0,0,3,6,16,17,6,4,7,100,25,2,0.09939837852265786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827074135689364,0.0,0.0,0.06759430591104375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950165739045787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562290176334585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936151713066952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247536368870573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20341871212216187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05025880676816143,0.0710102214773219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454820999368758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5513531955603853,0.15579465078392174,0.09535198195732286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10374608266817316,0.09863755326232397,0.0,0.0,0.103508115396757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020801430983617,0.09712205388027544,0.0,0.1755411785964403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036402701531613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370263820226976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470982747441662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5512825619566197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992282443163694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273542930451209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15841527706221634,0.09048855066501084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132412937087894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989265151285285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636904674267039,0.0,0.0,0.11591998771429525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709777266734793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430322984149413,0.0958164898564329,0.0,0.07236320339346954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867652309565384,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thegirlwho_criedwolf,2020/02/11,"What is normal mental health supposed to look like? I don’t know if i’d consider myself depressed, i mean, i’m definitely not suicidal, i have enough motivation to do my daily stuff but (not quite enough to try anything drastically different though) and overall i’m “ok” but there’s always that nagging feeling of melancholy, loneliness (especially loneliness) and feeling not good enough. The only time when i felt 100% carefree was when i was on prednisone for lupus and now i’m left wondering is this how “normal” people feel? Or is it normal to have underlying feelings of sadness/emptiness?",4.672049742710122,7.699087971698116,5.5342195540308765,72.54843053173244,74.94339622641509,8.00548885077187,32.277873070325896,8.841846274778883,3.4596905660377364,479,24,72,11,11,156,75,106,0.142,0.7020000000000001,0.156,-0.5352,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,6,5,1,0,1,1,9,1,0,2,0,23,21,11,1,4,7,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,9,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,6,7,3,9,18,3,7,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,3,5,50,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13064301151363886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920398636320207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523053039866978,0.0,0.0,0.16403966363064834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.486692877117945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31755130951118193,0.0,0.15075204581554724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13169063728959413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668918782052254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862873439699227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17058936134260574,0.0,0.0,0.07670604759471411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318469523426573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17102744967093336,0.0,0.0,0.15822686628789087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4615027274328426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194114560136901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884939297028297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16699705054820752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17973629055579754,0.1717409765556965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425930053657874,0.0,0.09155247175633748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659794447352312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702681889766209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Quantumfreaky,2020/02/11,"Constantly anxious and feeling guilty. So I’ve felt this way for a really long time. I’ve been feeling like I’m playing the victim to get sympathy from people even when I haven’t done anything wrong and I feel guilty that I may or might not be a shallow, terrible person. I know it’s kinda hard to explain, I actually drew out a diagram of the cycle one night when I was freaking out. It mostly said I want to have contact with people but it’s never enough, I always want to be the center of attention, but I never act on these feelings, but feel guilty about that too. I can’t figure out if I’m genuinely a bad selfish person or I’m psyching myself out. I feel like I’m never enough, I hate myself for wanting to be happy as my happiness would probably hinder the happiness of others in my company. Also I was screwed over by a manipulative woman for 4 years of my life. But I broke it off with her after I had strong suicidal feelings and this past year I haven’t felt happier in a long time. Anyway that’s just on my mind, venting really.",3.1343035516093214,4.708126731132077,5.136736958934517,80.44622086570479,74.14150943396227,8.00710321864595,26.621531631520533,8.671277953709913,2.0687615982241963,825,30,158,16,17,285,120,212,0.168,0.6459999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.4974,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,9,16,3,0,10,0,15,2,0,1,3,44,36,15,1,5,9,0,10,2,0,3,1,1,0,3,11,9,0,0,13,1,0,1,7,9,0,1,8,11,23,7,29,22,3,28,0,1,0,1,7,11,1,7,17,114,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.11241448288797502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212203905243116,0.09585213313083392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13013846398783405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479632747617106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618368065380124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448573494709465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788529777445095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238056108836038,0.0,0.076085738976502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4077252014810445,0.16459180402301124,0.2212120648144868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060185050584231785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3678842111215586,0.10319280937975876,0.11373200271334673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633085986451532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136619976477462,0.1125576975117577,0.0,0.0,0.20388931469671587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220453877803827,0.1163149186257694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26653830596478084,0.0,0.0,0.10810345403193572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805965487209407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099674250739967,0.15972452541189003,0.20116905721665915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12420055517640148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759475753125215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10957758467278816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600550736016586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13434319386198826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20383640107868745,0.09143706353277113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183179066829431,0.12594852275580254,0.0,0.1483646357669314
mentalhealth,853240936,2020/02/11,"I’ve been feeling low because of the fear of the inevitable death. I tried to accept but I can’t imagine that my dad will one day die of aging so I’m trying to convince myself that aging will be cured within his lifetime, I fear death so much that I kinda wanna kill myself now.",3.766724137931035,4.56295377586207,4.916724137931039,85.63818965517244,71.58620689655173,5.8000000000000025,24.84482758620689,3.1291,0.466813793103448,221,6,43,0,4,73,41,58,0.369,0.556,0.075,-0.9768,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,2,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,6,7,3,4,1,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,1,1,8,2,7,3,1,6,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,31,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18172309363985076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19225417693571967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093877172813661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6709058921714861,0.15073171809967334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3298109248532404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191427446880748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20200483304144504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4047897983131302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,linspo_,2020/02/11,feel invisible anyone else feel invisible to your friend group sometimes? like they’ll accidentally leave me out of things and i’m sure they don’t mean any harm by it but it’s sucks when it keeps happening. i really wish i wasn’t depressed so i could go out and live my life like i used to,1.1462142857142863,3.580768050000003,2.8961904761904758,89.56500000000004,85.16666666666666,6.761904761904763,18.57142857142857,7.957251820313856,0.6336428571428576,233,6,52,5,7,77,46,60,0.19699999999999998,0.613,0.19,-0.1043,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,2,0,2,7,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,13,14,5,0,2,1,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,2,9,4,6,11,0,4,0,1,0,0,5,2,1,0,3,27,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16531925251544494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16998417090777146,0.24908907220475696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940989927139763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093853673774798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20308243849993124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24584166536646476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18782177017405735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381617694400679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149763193707152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21608226150010235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574123399307958,0.0,0.0,0.17171174834712574,0.2375369512837709,0.0,0.214665540537064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26481183853534657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557388321921687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404363573913315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22912291479894695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150768699190024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20996405096208345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27955793410121466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,genericrice,2020/02/11,"its nearly impossible for me to get work done it used to be so much easier. somehow id just do it, there was some innate desire or motivator that kept me going through it, that enabled me to sit down after school and do the necessary work. i was always an overachiever

Ever since 8th grade ive noticed it getting worse and worse (im in 10th grade now). I have 3 AP classes, and i cannot tell you how much ive struggled with trying to force myself to do work. im barely scraping by with Cs and Bs and it is so hard to force myself to start working, and even harder to keep myself working. the only time i really work is like the morning before a big exam or due date and i genuinely get stressed enough for me to just get it done with, or cram in the chapter of the textbook. 

i feel like my mind is against me or something it wont let me stay focused and i just tell myself its in my head i can do it, but i just end up spacing out even more. for the past 2 years now ive just been telling myself its laziness, and i still believe thats at least part of it but i wonder if there is something else at work here? my therapist thought i wasnt getting enough sleep so i corrected my sleep schedule but it doesnt do anything i still just feel like shit  its so hard for some reason. 

sorry this is worded like shit, i would really appreciate some inputs or advice though",2.786552496798976,4.080887059859155,4.152996158770808,88.28016005121641,74.52816901408453,6.71293213828425,24.8809218950064,7.1686216300943375,0.9604070422535208,1071,34,228,11,22,354,148,284,0.08,0.846,0.07400000000000001,-0.1899,0,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,9,23,8,2,2,8,0,27,6,5,4,2,48,41,24,0,3,15,0,4,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,18,13,0,2,6,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,8,4,34,4,31,29,10,28,0,0,0,0,4,11,2,11,18,166,52,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104850907319917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752819337953579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667422485226072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928417190160933,0.1049751390885386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19069860761443605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778348823866433,0.0,0.0825244673678874,0.1925472020098756,0.0,0.12308103517620295,0.08428117531303041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422310097749677,0.13312698209402546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433977256344691,0.0,0.05295290500809036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669311223371812,0.0,0.09562335704845586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20128771717130933,0.0,0.0,0.08281729101704705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527668025319903,0.0,0.1820803492632908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407913219661868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698715321201535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607916369156356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086299026867432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089831198016364,0.0889450815345903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193792410239818,0.0957983423693926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429701533220447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912834487865885,0.07707445722567355,0.0,0.18648248536871448,0.0,0.0,0.14345972305047044,0.0,0.10430061275700604,0.06594900390012566,0.09931103731597778,0.1488176793564441,0.0,0.10673044901181453,0.09740564650494453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24431442668368455,0.0,0.0,0.10818214147591274,0.0,0.0,0.0915429363119302,0.07396971150249185,0.05433048161140112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06325899837467798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047238024504258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104317811125088,0.4748222352646605,0.0,0.18990443752152325,0.06618810332437321,0.0,0.0,0.06000097127062745
mentalhealth,GoatWhores,2020/02/11,"My problems I’m posting this here for a few reasons. I have a lot of issues with my mental health, and therapy hasn’t really ever worked for me. I think writing it all out will help, and maybe getting some input from this community would be good for me. 
I am 18M, I live in the US, I’m a freshman in college, I have a part time job, and I’ve been really unhappy for a long time. Without going into my whole life story, school was really hard for me, I’ve always had problems socializing, I don’t have a very supportive family, I’ve been in a handful of pretty abusive relationships/friendships, and I don’t have a lot of direction in my life.
I am in college now and it’s very difficult to be motivated to do much of anything. I often feel dissociated, depressed, or suicidal(More so thoughts of death and wishing to not be around rather than actual plans or a desire to carry anything out). I go from really good days and great times to really dark and and bad places and it’s very inconsistent from day to day. I have a lot of friends at school and a great girlfriend, but I have a hard time connecting to almost anyone. I need a lot of time alone, and I feel uncomfortable when people get too close or rely on me. The only exception I really have to this is my cousin, who is my age and is and always will be one my closest friends. 
All of this makes life really uncomfortable and unenjoyable for me a lot of the time. Being in therapy before I’ve been told I have mild PTSD, severe chronic depression, and I’ve been counseled for anxiety since elementary school. Mental illness runs in my family as well. 
My day to day life always feels like I’m putting up some kind of front to make people think I’m okay and happy, and I smoke a lot of pot. I’m at the point now that I smoke 1-3 times a day because it makes a lot of what I feel go away. I know this is a really bad habit and coping mechanism, but it feels like it’s all I have anymore.
I’m not really sure what to do with my life so I can turn it around and be healthier and happier. I don’t have much direction in college, and I don’t really have any kind of plan of what I want to do so it feels like I’m really lost. If anyone has any advice or anything like that I’d really love to read it.",4.7104634444784335,4.647789522483943,6.4037220862649145,78.85742773019274,69.19271948608137,10.097552768430713,28.455873355766286,9.957137785484203,2.4867620679106763,1765,55,373,40,28,613,194,467,0.11599999999999999,0.755,0.13,0.7696,1,1,2,0,0,0,45.0,1,0,0,5,14,26,0,0,22,1,42,10,1,5,5,81,75,34,1,9,12,1,9,4,3,3,8,0,0,0,20,30,0,0,12,1,0,6,8,8,1,1,9,9,41,18,61,57,17,48,0,3,0,1,11,22,0,16,23,247,61,10,0.0,0.06956578441604304,0.05729581408089946,0.0,0.0,0.0573740601544046,0.0,0.0,0.058792994293249023,0.060809380874007675,0.0,0.0,0.1465627699749715,0.0,0.0,0.07985425797088805,0.0,0.04491559436345186,0.0,0.0582279213139027,0.08210755630756651,0.0,0.14494838961380194,0.10453475739757452,0.0,0.0,0.0551631770244071,0.0,0.09804648196173492,0.0357911469243959,0.0,0.049960783479914006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22719173515191105,0.0,0.1011395399354854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053109636517014745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069954635117256,0.0,0.17812357121865466,0.1258346054743681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072366260927052,0.0,0.06135066194558004,0.0,0.1001045438813982,0.09849203748602203,0.0,0.12946347328166746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250151173351445,0.10519135735562443,0.0,0.0,0.062409604291589725,0.0,0.0,0.039354357959923474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06128154093154036,0.058263995152141375,0.0,0.0,0.12228195315520847,0.032267352075174616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20735507269279715,0.1147376164410155,0.0,0.05184501257621325,0.05195951610428418,0.0,0.0,0.06409261763221373,0.34941226313737084,0.05299114062487626,0.0,0.11757496190268422,0.0,0.058985507261082676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833860604268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632221712107438,0.043535246089253014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03978572295909304,0.04465419047254535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358089638100194,0.0,0.08140896508218952,0.0,0.0613430120471477,0.0,0.05550314587628275,0.0,0.05623121241142001,0.059732641059752116,0.0,0.11236159894357177,0.06863282885453394,0.05902318909705689,0.0,0.0,0.05872929400041967,0.0,0.4513597306809651,0.06036715937187893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17826330222610687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632943590419148,0.0,0.04856833560754649,0.0,0.0,0.05985092276933821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662727657077958,0.055336689668638465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13428779181279868,0.0,0.0,0.07524235877015636,0.0,0.04661188547234717,0.2396538116158459,0.0,0.0,0.05610317489010565,0.0,0.0,0.06386332500841684,0.0,0.0,0.07062499740795074,0.0,0.0,0.14533412506047574,0.03463068766908097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05279040257838118,0.0,0.0,0.06555142026218792,0.06751751852205268,0.05659762753485476,0.0,0.042744058345585055,0.0,0.0,0.04170831856879196,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chunterr,2020/02/11,"Is it weird to write a letter than talk about something face to face I want to talk to a teacher about dropping her class and discuss my current situation, even though I enjoy the class but I would like to write a note and hand it in person before or after class andI don’t want to just explain in person because I will break down or won’t be able to explain fully and I just hope it’s not weird to write a letter, is it? Like not a formal letter, just a lengthy note",3.3045918367346943,4.225257826530612,4.318979591836732,89.03316326530613,72.77551020408163,6.0081632653061225,24.20408163265306,5.288315135182226,0.3840653061224488,369,10,78,1,7,120,55,98,0.035,0.764,0.201,0.9464,1,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,7,0,7,3,3,0,0,20,12,7,0,4,8,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,7,4,15,8,0,7,0,0,0,0,14,3,0,3,4,53,11,3,0.2597222029692456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832424427571934,0.0,0.2210044652826877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17154406556275242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25796275032900284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537742985911277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4535588193607398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29193863807115805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999468407245112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4175097372889727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25517574573563284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063817689630107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18449920119530772,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vishnal,2020/02/11,"Lost a months worth of meds, what do I do? I live on my college campus on weekdays and go home on weekends. I'm a fourth year now so I'm pretty good at not forgetting things, but sometimes I fuck up. Its 12:30 AM as I write this and I realized I have no idea were my meds are. I'm 99% sure I remember putting them in my bag before I left, I texted my mom to ask her to check my room but I wont be getting an answer until the morning.   


I'm honestly worried I lost them in my travels somehow and its always a nightmare to argue with my pharmacy to get emergency doses even tho my meds are extremely low doses in the grand scheme of things. Currently I only have 2 days worth of back ups and if a whole months worth is just gone I'm not sure how to go about asking my pharmacy for replacement meds and if they will allow me to get them. 

TLDR: I lost a months worth of anti depressants and anti anxiety pills I take daily and dont know what to do 

P.S I live in the U.S",1.430724637681159,2.9870071690821294,3.5452415458937203,90.1277173913044,78.7584541062802,6.918840579710146,22.61111111111111,7.793537801064563,0.940940096618358,752,23,169,12,18,257,119,207,0.174,0.695,0.13,-0.8949,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,4,3,9,12,2,0,9,0,14,4,0,2,2,27,33,16,0,2,7,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,0,7,8,0,0,5,2,5,5,5,7,0,0,5,0,30,5,26,25,1,28,0,5,0,1,10,13,1,3,10,109,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787249148960972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998194687174123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199249010080585,0.0,0.0,0.09044550385685407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000892591642573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585767234394618,0.0,0.10130927618885667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13785431229667294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768946394019152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874138244627753,0.18436086893549056,0.0,0.13369672421961626,0.0986573305992836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798634292114656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13278304421065815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464300876496276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277986906668874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20772808345573687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3852010819217039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5226144607127412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377596676020513,0.2816587784045818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945826169386553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966577333597445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118244488151619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332449275566868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163330257595684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22171823129087445,0.0,0.08843851989930006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562881597030419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313228623375177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11945276056533286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574592279358963
mentalhealth,iiprobablyneedhelp,2020/02/11,"how do i get over my distrust in men a few weeks ago i went through a pretty traumatizing experience and since then i haven’t been able to trust a single man. i know not all men are like him but i just feel extremely uncomfortable and i start to panic every time i’m around a man. is it possible to get over this feeling? and if so, how?",1.9999061032863883,3.5619704225352122,3.9827464788732416,87.58473004694841,77.16901408450704,7.550234741784037,23.10093896713615,8.344100000000001,1.164237558685446,264,8,60,5,6,90,53,71,0.177,0.7120000000000001,0.111,-0.7758,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,1,4,0,5,0,0,2,1,14,13,9,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,2,8,2,8,11,3,10,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,6,41,10,0,0.2710555424776717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24027438385087355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412968999172941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22837598506712506,0.0,0.0,0.2651443320239137,0.0,0.0,0.2741076531689926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832306670792705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489650374308929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242404651029005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180252769183637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30557439729993696,0.0,0.2757609329263164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22421994574821896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185450808091672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580546665896616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21742440635730795,0.0,0.0,0.2512712034660771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,newbitchy,2020/02/11,"Possible eating disorder? Little back story, I’ve been pretty depressed most my life, I’ve been through a lot maybe get into that another time. I have had an ED in the past but only caused from my depression making me unmotivated. But today I was eating my left over dinner at work today, and half way through my head told me to stop that there was maggots in it, I knew there wasn’t but I ended up spitting it out and wanting to throw up, and am unable to eat anything now. Is this a possible sign of an ED?",3.2530339805825257,4.678441718446604,4.89726941747573,82.88337985436894,73.5631067961165,7.480097087378643,25.496359223300967,8.07648339933343,1.5338165048543688,399,13,79,6,8,135,72,103,0.145,0.835,0.02,-0.9218,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,5,0,9,7,2,2,0,16,14,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,5,4,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,8,0,10,0,15,6,2,20,0,2,0,0,1,10,0,2,8,57,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684228503755189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217561344599651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350596769952607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16499978535878734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766815299618699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18408309728266573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4930594922131176,0.0,0.0,0.1422606113028481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391671062625093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648412605670124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745128313567374,0.0,0.11344983138067212,0.0,0.16098226613666464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655238751467896,0.0,0.0,0.1072143178463929,0.0,0.16136320577475066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12215785979482965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332884991653115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621472001947154,0.0,0.16340709605380416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13428453591375947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365813282938773,0.0,0.30449574487831976,0.15347817751805454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09473714883442136,0.12749175296039367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693242294141099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,redbeardgenmeme,2020/02/11,"I (M20) am really self conscious and can’t take compliments from my girlfriend Basically every time she tells me I’m cute, or handsome, or starts to talk about how much she loves me I get really uncomfortable and I don’t know how to take it. I used to be okay and I had a “big ego”. Not in an arrogant way but I was able to just play it off like “I know I’m pretty great” but I always knew I was just kind of deflecting it. Now I can’t even do that. She tells me she “misses my sweet face” all the time and I just don’t know how to feel about it. It used to be exciting because someone likes me and tells me things like that but I never really believed them. I guess I’m asking if there’s an easy way to try and keep myself from thinking like this? Or get better at accepting compliments? Part of me wishes that she would just stop saying stuff like that all the time but I know that’s just my anxiety and stuff. I don’t like that part of me. I just sort of don’t like myself very much and I’m at the point where I’m okay with it but when someone else is telling me they like me and the way I look and stuff all the time I just can’t take the conflicting opinions of myself. This is getting to be ramble so I’m gonna stop. Thanks to anyone who has advice or can help :/",0.2604517996476225,2.2480347481751832,2.177309338031716,96.28076642335769,84.72992700729927,5.677120563805689,17.112509438711303,6.953978226594392,-0.19962783790586425,987,21,236,13,29,327,125,274,0.06,0.6629999999999999,0.27699999999999997,0.9967,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,1,18,24,0,0,9,2,20,2,1,5,4,56,51,25,0,3,18,0,1,8,1,2,0,1,0,1,19,11,0,4,9,1,0,0,9,1,0,0,4,4,40,23,23,42,7,20,0,1,1,1,19,7,0,8,18,156,59,0,0.09648078360727956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09427990511440634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027974087568605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380753538005125,0.0,0.0,0.06746160718816466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901965087243752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058813790184740325,0.0,0.0,0.10870080414696542,0.0,0.08532941267292253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059731456013246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372464764066671,0.0,0.081289221371209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04878358311502766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122168201193426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063704045341129,0.10628446048314133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466903552432529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575655349438029,0.0,0.1004698892639924,0.2120932619203564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3770850995031641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101955892384219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707767406685711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14184895434518568,0.0,0.07441192816957662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20895857332591355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912055258540957,0.0,0.0,0.09815564239641816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18542418153144472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672539157960949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065049897943924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634957097169424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828959522110044,0.0,0.0,0.16132451043839588,0.0,0.0,0.3313422432152845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176246262730138,0.07754759923640292,0.33731382974175594,0.08882654294350104,0.0,0.0,0.06409754555103987,0.061820990412248776,0.0,0.0,0.225034883197255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550411890437632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666568393279998,0.0,0.07960675076106971,0.0,0.2297458656499065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094813967650878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853718050569686,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dynamicbastard84,2020/02/11,"Mood Swings due to Stress First time posting and Canadian. I've been working for a company that deals with varying degrees of workload, at times it can be stressful. That being said I've always been able to handle it pretty well at work. I'm enthusiastic, like a challenge, and keep a positive attitude throughout it. I've been described as too upbeat at times. What I've began to realize is that if the stress is too much it starts to affect my personal life (I would act different at home than at work). A few of my relationships have gone south because when the stress is overwhelming. I become quite, unattentive, completely remove myself of emotion, and distant. Easily agitated is also a way to describe it. I'm unhappy and so far the only things that have worked so far to change my mindset has just been time. Any partner I'd have would try to help me but they just don't know how and of course this takes a toll. I'm wondering if this happens to anyone else out there and what you've done to change your mood back to your usual self? Thanks!",4.333799261083744,6.110717216748773,4.9945782019704446,81.85176878078818,71.41379310344827,8.227709359605912,27.95843596059113,8.841846274778883,2.2230987684729064,837,31,157,16,16,269,127,203,0.057999999999999996,0.8490000000000001,0.09300000000000001,0.7088,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,1,7,12,11,0,5,9,0,19,1,0,2,0,21,32,15,0,4,5,0,0,1,1,2,1,1,1,3,14,8,0,1,3,0,0,3,1,5,1,1,8,1,10,4,24,20,2,25,0,1,0,0,10,9,0,3,12,100,24,5,0.11645672359608655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313039978513504,0.09690132318556152,0.0,0.0,0.07919456551655278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142924889207771,0.11932367554307705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954803200084466,0.0,0.07099093779194543,0.12861730167178415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24639154390834084,0.0,0.12210265900861016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200617684299921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167248960779492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917566114961685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728464916414713,0.13099813939912944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990580295988864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298229607178344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780584870240795,0.0,0.11681558906772345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351208679543243,0.0,0.0,0.06400156968197479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225682791039612,0.05689487269272321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560909152547967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857058603577159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016855190988727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153334959332728,0.11847835484509385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386606048589152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503093843004182,0.0,0.0,0.11077701246124262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148976097839605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242866836077689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5336031336524798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756096292618208,0.0,0.0,0.10721770463301583,0.0,0.0,0.07736867245823041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716274081961646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906647090163739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128260628159107,0.0,0.0,0.0924379265762793,0.0,0.0,0.10470858040313746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12629234902872186,0.3391275270833396,0.0,0.0,0.16545503027205538,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,needadvice-20,2020/02/11,"I’m losing hope, I don’t know if I can do this anymore I’ve dealt with depression since I was 11. From ages 11-14 I didn’t think I would make it to my next birthday but I got my mental health in order & was fine up until now. I’m 18 about to turn 19 and I don’t think I can do this anymore. I no longer go to therapy or any support groups and I can’t do this alone. I’m scared. I want to keep going because I know it gets better eventually but everyday is harder and harder. I just want to stop hurting. I love my friends and family which is the only thing keeping me from doing anything but I just want to stop feeling like this.",-0.380998201438846,1.6479014892086354,2.1448875899280573,95.1581946942446,88.06474820143885,4.913848920863308,18.759442446043167,6.322622252153567,-0.12547158273381287,493,14,115,5,16,169,83,139,0.152,0.6409999999999999,0.20600000000000002,0.792,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,4,11,0,1,1,0,15,2,0,1,0,27,37,10,0,6,7,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,8,5,0,4,5,0,0,2,5,4,0,0,4,1,19,7,13,32,0,12,0,3,0,1,3,2,0,3,8,69,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622264960886155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16971382601006602,0.0,0.10651708899334324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106794219414816,0.0,0.0,0.12889715930208595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548316843691798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385308217219077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490939180702635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147661423821749,0.0,0.07919930119955321,0.11189998889094467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101571900494924,0.0,0.08183525943776537,0.0,0.17803842283342755,0.0,0.12527522164535454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166495551853731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155573777426154,0.0,0.0,0.1676808776233919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27844855487643777,0.0,0.0,0.17216486634057396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652388997082192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523436400734735,0.0,0.0,0.14136909377722795,0.0,0.1045549980561075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785111716637187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16658297085437304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912788375602552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15681883910532593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12956999057091256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619075450639689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17774740453943258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17912563505953716,0.0,0.10406125364508316,0.2007306117129443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17037376956936465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771619298016364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126892400338508,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sushiiisenpai,2020/02/11,"I have a lot of things going for me but I still can’t help having major depression and deep suicidal feelings Just a rant/ramble more for me, you don’t have to read it

I just moved from my old town to Washington DC. My life growing up wasn’t too rough, just rough in terms with dealing (or lack of dealing) with mental illness. 

Over the past few years my lust for life has slowly drained from me. I experimented with a lot of molly and LSD 2014/2015. I also struggled with feelings of guilt for things in my past. I just turned 30 and I deeply regretted not having a bond with my family. the past year I worked on mending the tenuous relationship I had with my mother. Every week we would go to grab lunch and maybe grocery shopping and each time I visited I would learn a little about her life. I had a good job and some work friends that were really nice and fun to be around. They would invite me out all the time but I came up with excuses not to go out with them. The real reason is because I hate myself and I disgust myself. I don’t want people to hang out with me because I don’t want to hang out with myself. When I am forced to be around other people I am constantly in my head loathing myself that I’m most definitely out of place. I just moved in with my girlfriend in DC last month and found a good job at this brand new high end cocktail bar. We leased a new apartment for the two of us, I live in a nice, safe apartment in a very nice area of town. I should be feeling okay but I don’t. I sometimes stay up til 6-7 am anxious and sick. I feel like i’m dying or may have already died and every day of me ‘living’ is just me living in hell or a purgatory and I’m suffering for what a horrible life I lived. My interests and hopes have died and I just turned 30 a few weeks ago. I see more and more people functioning normally and even if it’s an act they act like they are functioning normally whereas it takes a lot of effort for me to even get to a point where I’m functioning period. I do think I shouldn’t be alive and it hurts to admit. I want to make the lives of my girlfriend and mother worth it, I want to take care of them and be a good person with dreams, who had fun, who learns things and sees the world in light like I used to in some ways. I just wanted this to be out there. I don’t really believe in anything but I’m praying that we all can find something good to hold onto and something happy that isn’t a distraction, but a warm radiance from deep within.",4.140087165087163,4.437515225868727,5.0654089154089155,86.70412015912018,70.48648648648648,8.286509886509888,26.12168012168012,8.199878495009871,1.3646877734877734,1949,54,429,26,33,638,236,518,0.151,0.66,0.18899999999999997,0.9137,2,0,2,0,0,0,37.0,4,1,5,3,19,30,3,3,27,1,39,10,1,3,2,105,72,33,4,16,19,2,8,3,3,6,6,0,0,1,18,46,3,2,11,5,2,12,11,10,0,1,7,11,68,20,78,53,17,77,2,4,2,1,26,40,1,12,26,294,86,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412684062055304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798312238918349,0.05785189155021168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172589732680928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059531322937701185,0.12879947995483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819805441966934,0.0,0.0,0.08150468971223815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274000488535886,0.07375751620576998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817602944729497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04665462165582158,0.14916290325314766,0.06230808044551664,0.0,0.2252388029969289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407356222518938,0.0,0.0,0.0955624509631421,0.0,0.12190255291675853,0.0,0.0,0.07076438215608266,0.06819762324142271,0.0,0.14631320664254752,0.05168115737740854,0.0,0.0,0.06611930059991837,0.0,0.0,0.0793192968609888,0.0558912693470441,0.0,0.03779572244771208,0.0,0.12334092041752524,0.24270823453760845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770094311985666,0.0,0.07142277303497523,0.07424378870223278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04848933469961808,0.07643332165393167,0.0,0.07185195418379202,0.0,0.0,0.07744363436963465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357659523990374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058968406036299575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043892477006728,0.10602797837364886,0.07250571435055454,0.31939666883575824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18450780897730026,0.0,0.0,0.04828886367806965,0.0,0.07267728791108835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290374654483264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05774271446543335,0.15377624861121084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973675778391514,0.0,0.0,0.14175965038830585,0.0,0.0,0.07591078638504549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20717594665320185,0.15045855503879824,0.06316626618920544,0.07558201929417609,0.0,0.06838659698164809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236160214730533,0.0823410625535146,0.09268830774813867,0.07437965062545554,0.0,0.07766826199784561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529445612914813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138485087950543,0.07154811286959753,0.0,0.0,0.07710697362936886,0.05777243490676466,0.0,0.0,0.07562759205214767,0.0,0.07913043416658215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10878440000095713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14418248151293184,0.04635384881275738,0.0,0.0,0.08436643350229556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15737470012937976,0.07066764707697262,0.0,0.08701854927886725,0.06248028284816583,0.0,0.059689747198264836,0.21334600439601084,0.05742173249288372,0.11605681829276494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533171211430976,0.0,0.0,0.1541690976816318,0.0,0.0,0.09317178502084683
mentalhealth,ap_ril2004,2020/02/11,"I’m not feeling right Hello, today I just want to tell somebody how I’ve been feeling and its really weird. Sometimes I’m motivated to do lots of things, to study, to draw,... But sometimes I’m just... unmotivated, but I have suicidal thoughts when I’m unmotivated. I cry alot, I get angry and I get sad, but I don’t really feel anything... but I think I should I have tears in my eyes as I’m typing this but I don’t feel anything. I feel like I’m lost, like my dream can’t be reached and I just want to end it all. I think of cutting myself but I don’t have the courage to... nor I think I should do that. 
I can’t tell this to anybody, my mom always blames me for everything 
Also, lately I have not been getting enough sleep, only around 2-3 hours a day and I get by by eating 1 meal a day. I don’t want to eat, like I said I’m unmotivated to and I think of staving myself and not going to sleep at all
Is it normal to feel like this ? Or do I need to talk to somebody ?",-0.0937397673416598,1.7634113127962079,2.5788905644118927,93.65567750969412,85.1611374407583,5.352951314088756,19.543515725980185,6.574015621080383,-0.02097345971563991,741,21,179,8,22,258,98,211,0.195,0.677,0.128,-0.9458,0,0,0,0,0,1,33.0,0,0,0,2,7,9,1,0,4,0,19,6,3,2,2,44,48,18,1,7,13,1,6,4,0,2,0,1,0,0,8,7,3,0,12,1,0,1,10,4,0,0,5,8,29,5,23,40,5,12,0,2,1,0,6,4,0,3,11,110,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09579787070446803,0.09967680210800496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19715773589536031,0.10664055743800807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158623257245952,0.154512265489923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24515488803631685,0.0,0.0,0.10610043449134064,0.12377748348418527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766160810789263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3634235617032541,0.17115930696928552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250346160528584,0.0,0.06808073300117203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797129955509855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513094865280625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340978958767288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307674622702853,0.10184314205774328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402993110427965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882448339171298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173710339896382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110745330042186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348404837835666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023019821328387,0.11394992334697596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23975765435045898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23695532443849054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310333490910881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962845248218641,0.20940752603777604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958469090468692,0.30703231277164644,0.0,0.0951017168596409,0.0,0.0,0.11354910729146905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21196983258573296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Handso4p,2020/02/11,"I think a girl I went on a date with is struggling with bad anxiety or depression. Any thoughts or ideas? Ive (20M) Been talking to this girl (20f) for over a month. Everything seemed great, and went on our first date. Which went fantastic!

(Read about it[here](https://www.reddit.com/r/dating_advice/comments/exqzxj/after_first_date_update/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)).

Our date went well, spent over 8 hours together, vibed really well! Confessed feelings for one another and agreed to take things slow and let things play out naturally. She said she never had a boyfriend before and doesnt know how to act/ respond. But since our first date, everything seemed to take a 180. Communication basically shut down. I have a feeling she has some sort of anxiety or relationship anxiety/ depression. She went silent for Tuesday and Wednesday. Ignored my two texts those days. Thursday she said sorry shes been MIA because shes been not feeling so well. And friday she said shes been stressed with work, school, socializing and over all had no energy and her social battery is depleted. And once again, she said she was very sorry she fell into a rut and needs to pull herself out of it.

I told her that she shouldnt apologize, everyone stresses out and she needed to take time for herself and relax this weekend. No word from her since friday. Told her sunday night (yesterday) that shes got this week in the bag, shes strong and will pull through in one piece. And that I wanna be there for her and if she needs anything to let me know. That was the last text I sent her. Still no response.

Im not too sure if i should keep texting her once a day, with supporting messages/ reminders that im still there for her. Or if its making her anxiety worsen. Should i wait for a response ? or text her again tonight/ tomorrow/ or Wednesday morning?

My gut says that she's just stressed and anxious. Everything will be fine, she just needs time to recover and breath. So I've been telling myself to just give it time and be patient. But finding it hard and questioning my gut.

I wanna help her and be there for her but her ignoring me is making me think its fruitless, and doing more harm than good. I'm not too sure I know what to do? Shes been distant for a week now, and idk if it's because relationship anxiety, stress, depression, combination of them? Did I do anything wrong? Does stress/ anxiety/ depression make people push others away like this? How long does this usually last? Did I do Something to put her off? I wanna help her and be there for her but the lack of communication and ignoring my texts is concerning me. And making me second guess her interest in me. Any ideas?",4.082379518072287,6.7205019417670675,4.094804216867473,84.1838930722892,74.76305220883535,7.603815261044178,27.04166666666667,8.536127082880203,2.085342570281125,2149,83,397,43,48,660,234,498,0.14800000000000002,0.768,0.083,-0.9828,0,0,1,0,0,0,92.0,3,0,1,4,23,30,0,6,13,0,42,3,3,6,4,99,84,43,0,15,20,0,4,1,0,5,0,5,0,2,23,33,0,5,16,4,1,12,9,16,3,6,27,9,68,14,51,45,5,64,1,4,0,0,67,16,0,16,37,268,91,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815353764740913,0.0,0.08555008870484923,0.06595750271940827,0.28871595676903145,0.07106057046344234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352482889187548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590978465969815,0.0,0.05251996225475379,0.07668810335315197,0.0,0.053524377623402467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113227601188305,0.0,0.2167072071774257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009071171488684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06010489246825109,0.16959491100327698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541436928595487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05749065318286501,0.10700763573658394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06034066334942113,0.0,0.05275863027067595,0.050307919722390765,0.06934891078270551,0.06929287897245494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634721417133399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432283762805094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06194511488545234,0.0,0.0,0.14201583385990785,0.13588840655610235,0.0,0.0,0.0559095699914054,0.0,0.0,0.10370673658910552,0.10254591774019604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864169203671494,0.0,0.03073040033723165,0.0,0.0,0.055665675503529084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16794843799748094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05020722150792879,0.0,0.0,0.186562082441782,0.048513364129833016,0.0,0.0,0.059028613656420675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13397567381793693,0.08524710428285041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04360784484836305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323318494471701,0.07046385719835124,0.0,0.06291832694933748,0.0,0.040296186639196534,0.0,0.0,0.13506492274782314,0.0,0.0,0.2393341810944508,0.05002164238001088,0.0,0.06365947876285047,0.0,0.1145259712608444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406521893891396,0.0,0.0,0.12823991812310426,0.0,0.04842449764015417,0.0,0.1408257222005479,0.0,0.0,0.10046612679259197,0.0,0.3602661615683538,0.0657581012847342,0.0,0.0,0.07137965545770543,0.11856747104232315,0.0,0.14188185950432164,0.05055768627009066,0.05497851302481378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357766405568061,0.08060923275369561,0.0,0.04993660999659311,0.11003477028827732,0.0,0.0,0.12020978493650215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06144543503166384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927690078720006,0.05190016415195669,0.0,0.0,0.10091126538601604,0.0,0.16966748191405132,0.291550699409058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045792899163914005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687727025646458,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,avestolas,2020/02/11,"I spend like 90% of my time on a bed What's the point of my life? I'm a useless waste of space. I tried getting a job, quit in 2 weeks. No one gets it but my parents. My extended family and my only 2 friends are being kept in the dark about my mental health (my parents won't tell my family and I won't tell my friends because I'm ashamed) so I feel like I have to get my shit together before everyone finds out that I'm a failure with an invisible illness.

20F. Overweight, could never hold down a job, has never had a boyfriend,has never even been kissed. I feel like my whole existence is one worthless sequence of disappointments",3.1129230769230785,4.44760367692308,4.456923076923079,86.26307692307695,73.76923076923076,7.661538461538463,28.384615384615394,8.238735603445708,1.8436,498,20,105,8,10,165,84,130,0.225,0.659,0.11599999999999999,-0.9395,4,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,3,11,1,1,9,0,10,6,1,0,3,14,19,4,0,1,1,2,2,3,2,2,4,0,1,0,3,4,1,2,3,0,1,0,6,5,0,2,3,2,17,6,12,12,1,12,0,3,0,1,6,7,1,0,8,63,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023464211225306,0.0,0.12595833898479894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11818588620196105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776909047220217,0.0,0.0,0.1414441933996579,0.0,0.0,0.279089518089128,0.0,0.14969173554402201,0.2114981229725394,0.0,0.0,0.1352921323628554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22872743485848754,0.0,0.2320107973503845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734361124315893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937838656966851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455440734614332,0.2169525562753968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491743445226905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34249792537634643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20061108854513773,0.1125796528570038,0.0,0.0,0.32872840252322216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13993143373778824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15744276643528496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15194549496173454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587606801963769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631454495745754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049923168781688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873669472916355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16526458232263694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheRealEazyRed,2020/02/11,"Help, i feel as if im floating hundredds if not thousands of feet in the air so if i listen to a certain type of music, or stare off into space for a while, (i swear to god i'm not lying for attention) when i'm on a couch or bed being chill or whatever. I start to get a weird sensation of being suspended in the air hundreds if not thousands of feet into the air, i don't know what this is called or if i have a disorder or something (wont be surprised). but other than that, i would like to know if there is a name for this, PLEASE HELP :)",1.12641025641026,2.5262504017094045,3.496076923076924,90.83642307692308,79.17094017094017,6.731282051282051,22.81111111111111,7.554174236665415,0.8315818803418802,415,13,96,6,10,144,70,117,0.053,0.7490000000000001,0.198,0.9595,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,9,0,9,2,2,0,1,24,17,16,0,7,15,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,2,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,3,7,3,19,12,0,13,0,0,1,0,5,10,0,11,4,70,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213219399861939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3606488328057924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15911090875121453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644065326312211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4218447417475697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33990678790367423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34587815704912617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537360240560319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3454225057647615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422548893737793,0.0,0.0,0.22273106770902115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22353858362134515,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,minecraftpiggo,2020/02/11,"Question abt my sister TW: self harm My sister is cutting. My dad would get mad and be unsupportive if he found out and she didn’t tell me but she’s not good at hiding it. If I confront her she’ll hide it from me more and idk what to do. Also, I don’t really even care about her as bad as it sounds. I stopped feeling empathy towards her about a year ago bc were really toxic towards each other. I’m just annoyed at her for some reason? So I can’t do a compassionate conversation with her it’s just not happening",0.3427350427350433,2.632762333333332,2.837037037037039,89.519358974359,87.70370370370371,5.915669515669517,20.344729344729345,7.321109707123232,0.6952498575498578,404,13,87,7,13,139,75,108,0.21100000000000002,0.6759999999999999,0.113,-0.833,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,7,9,4,0,2,0,10,0,0,1,0,20,16,10,0,3,7,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,6,6,0,1,4,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,3,2,17,3,13,10,3,8,0,0,0,0,17,5,0,4,3,63,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349166216068129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21192952568730886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221273454533698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701967905715889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750375343264062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399772961023795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905713281131028,0.0,0.0,0.13845752172857834,0.0,0.0,0.22227899402958784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23434871117311204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2968734255066432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3395461854652264,0.2724758630261737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764646933699261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22156140189883966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316316497547621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882564993226458,0.0,0.0,0.17065865676811842
mentalhealth,gothsloth7,2020/02/11,"High blood pressure from stress? On the weekends I always feel fine. I'm not stressed about anything, and I feel healthy and well rested.
But as soon as my classes start on Monday I feel like my actual health declines. After a long day at class I feel like my blood pressure is really high. It's like I'm on the verge of a heart attack. My face gets warm and I feel tense. I feel tired and dehydrated. Sometimes my skin will even break out in acne within a few hours. Is it normal for stress to affect me physically this way? And how do I stop it?",1.776535626535626,3.938981117117123,2.9094185094185114,92.17651105651106,80.17117117117117,5.477805077805079,20.000819000819,6.574015621080383,0.11400180180180185,428,11,91,4,11,137,74,111,0.174,0.677,0.149,-0.6254,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,5,12,1,5,5,0,4,7,5,2,0,18,14,9,0,1,2,0,8,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,6,1,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,8,13,6,15,13,2,21,0,0,0,0,0,10,0,0,12,54,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.14546485583304944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403309937440912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266688202058022,0.0,0.0,0.16958169667249465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613387856941293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845529478792643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4522270958783234,0.2129825484085376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787973116653073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15844794661710207,0.0,0.17664142969334592,0.0,0.3149883720734913,0.0,0.0,0.14679790695121642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184752643184457,0.0,0.0,0.13191685362202388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605096486482094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549414619196774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742800070736992,0.0,0.10550818996056632,0.0,0.0,0.1246240883220991,0.5122565538352403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17132701562957953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831997908887527,0.0,0.0,0.1340263407304101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moonstickk,2020/02/11,"Acting like a kid? So I’ve noticed a trend in my mental health recently. When I’ve had a bad day/week with my depression or anxiety, when I’m around people I’m close with I start to act like a kid. My voice gets higher pitched, I talk in simple sentences and I react emotionally to situations I normally wouldn’t. (ex: accidentally tossed a plush off my bed and got really upset). I have no idea what this is but has anyone else heard of something like this? Or experienced it themselves? I just want to know I’m not crazy",1.8238701298701296,4.1709915428571485,3.8660606060606066,84.34636363636366,81.19047619047619,7.246753246753247,21.926406926406926,8.296473431620573,1.3693809523809521,412,13,84,9,11,140,74,105,0.096,0.777,0.127,0.461,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,1,5,0,5,1,0,1,0,17,14,8,0,3,5,1,0,3,0,1,1,2,1,2,4,6,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,3,3,10,3,10,10,0,11,0,1,0,0,5,5,0,2,7,45,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447274583324326,0.0,0.0,0.15033147652780218,0.2202906765465741,0.0,0.1913936443216833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951420142686478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865580926706475,0.0,0.1851773095875585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17960309288519447,0.2418436125373857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232748861370223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17195339917812616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285326316989889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24270637211876625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815718063591725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151112285253025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21666723717849293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106522178125312,0.0,0.24477644605459115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905241945774528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773311050749107,0.0,0.2122844123116519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24166656068620104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16551582770001982,0.0,0.0,0.15217656544172925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17280710585323775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268112861857596,0.0,0.17245828484106948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kittycatastrophe16,2020/02/11,"Anyone else experience thoughts of wanting to cause mass chaos ? So sometimes I get this urge to literally yank the wheel of my car and just wreck. Bad. I’m trying to find the root as to why. I don’t necessarily want to die. It’s just like I want to cause panic and chaos for my loved ones. Maybe a cry for help? I have a lot of mental health issues I feel, but for a different thread. I try to use cognitive behavioral therapy, and understand as to why I would feel the urge to do this. I know my family loves me, and I love them. Maybe it’s an attention thing, because I feel a lack of it? Idk but it’s whack getting these urges 😓",1.1310139860139865,3.1120168333333367,3.120000000000001,90.77884615384615,81.42424242424242,7.0918414918414925,20.759906759906762,8.139509932561175,0.8649200466200466,490,14,113,10,13,165,81,132,0.152,0.7070000000000001,0.141,0.3899,1,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,1,8,0,4,4,0,4,0,26,20,9,1,5,4,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,8,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,3,15,4,18,18,2,2,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,1,1,65,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983710913195262,0.14629793322800627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192177402400136,0.08703911800915144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933546969613955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15684028843481315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14818608629018784,0.14917771916856798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192767742256508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13966905392312984,0.13460299133151998,0.0,0.2165859418847564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050096502617228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14919632266327626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177152395576124,0.0,0.0,0.09570435431655233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14902822991926273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846973641405218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975650262475391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138889808740685,0.3866013697770871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868891873273597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438915595265065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675337431993604,0.0,0.0,0.16752494466607382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121591865863595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16328466622587598,0.0,0.09485860057292196,0.0,0.0,0.11335365722776858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19388040517350555,0.0,0.0,0.1486420129464782,0.0,0.12331856406242606,0.0,0.0,0.2526511249109472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576786803740335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142886087279636,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nonitoh,2020/02/11,"I don’t know who I am. I genuinely have no idea who I am. I don’t know what I enjoy, what I like to do, what i’m doing, and I don’t even know if what I think is true all of the time. 
Sometimes I am just walking down the hallway and feel completely disconnected from myself thinking am I doing the right thing? Did I even tell myself to do this or am I just doing this? 

Before I moved across the country I was with a group of people who made fun of everything I did, said, or thought. They didn’t really care about me as a person. I tried to remove myself from that situation a few times but always ended back up with them. I had a severe need for validation / social interaction even if that meant being made fun of, I was still talked to. 
 I had to drop everything I liked, become accustomed to their sense of humor, and do what they did to fit in. I feel like after 4 years of doing this I have become a shell of a person. I say this is the reason but I honestly don’t know, I question everything I think.
On top of that when they presented the opportunity to try cannabis I did so, to cope with depression which I had also had for 5-6 years since that time( differing in intensity ).I used this as an (unhealthy) coping methodl for a while. I lied about it when found out.  I have been mostly truthful, withdrawing details of amount, but we have moved past this since. However I still feel severe anxiety when thinking about this situation feeling like I’m a horrible person for lying, etc. To make myself feel better I just say I told the truth on everything that mattered, the rest is my business but idk i still feel like shit. 

I just recently moved, and I have no friends. I don’t know how to make friends anymore either. I used to be outgoing, people told me I was funny/ that they enjoyed talking to me, but I don’t know if I’m that person anymore. However since the move I think my depression has been better. Instead of not leaving my bed for days/ weeks at a time, I’ve been to school, talked, and *laughed* with my family, and don’t have constant negative thoughts. I do feel sad and depressed sometimes, but mostly better. However when I do feel these good feelings I feel like I deserve to be sad again, hurting, and feeling worthless. 

My self esteem is still shit, anxiety / OCD are still pretty rough, but it seems my depression has been better. Of course until the inevitable relapse. 

Sorry for writing so long, I think I just needed to get stuff off of my chest. I doubt anyone will read this long post anyway, i’m not worth the time, but thank you for giving me the space to express myself. I have yet to do this. 

tl;dr: idk who i am/ what i enjoy. I question what I do / what I think, have anxiety about a past event when I think about it ( which may seem silly ), and don’t know how to restart my life in a new community.",3.7070528352683816,4.972490701413427,4.8014033316506834,84.64147232037692,72.19787985865725,7.793303045599865,26.19703853272758,8.269060116576782,1.5964345953222283,2211,72,449,34,42,726,233,566,0.149,0.677,0.174,0.9187,3,0,1,0,0,0,80.0,1,1,6,6,33,39,2,1,24,0,61,4,3,9,4,92,112,36,0,5,21,0,12,6,2,2,1,3,1,5,36,15,0,0,36,1,1,6,14,11,0,0,25,15,82,28,64,82,8,58,0,8,0,0,36,15,2,13,41,330,118,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04574453376350638,0.047596766044355435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13127845040885344,0.0,0.1134583120324587,0.039997068990088966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04398491773651789,0.0,0.0,0.12635054745754698,0.048674811272171985,0.0,0.0,0.20236259097968315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058321397969482075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05997535950151482,0.061815196058797976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03689065056249724,0.0,0.19707249068635013,0.0,0.0,0.05976406545869939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05066412094778908,0.0,0.0637955110871507,0.1133444295631907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20563839387696065,0.0,0.05392509035336345,0.0,0.3181543492423046,0.1634608919596719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271919821680941,0.08838846887182665,0.0,0.029885759225778588,0.05487350868861972,0.0,0.047978444316943133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123607806523715,0.06457425772820899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200576160300416,0.0,0.0,0.06056881099063305,0.0,0.0,0.040403565863642375,0.1676764685344833,0.0,0.0,0.10124419450652568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825210318566407,0.07636575039229572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431873049653169,0.0,0.08482932970552373,0.0,0.05524618697126967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092118377084608,0.07931352823623165,0.199786822451524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054783841667168265,0.05819514482875821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815898485625385,0.0,0.05721762355403421,0.0,0.036645158089489344,0.058813330872696586,0.05648021612545901,0.0,0.0,0.04885031829346287,0.054412337952429966,0.0909788814174476,0.0,0.057891623444338375,0.0,0.10414936678210794,0.05967431135073485,0.12924428119603648,0.1174343572728718,0.14195461348907407,0.12859521270751162,0.0,0.0583103820106044,0.0,0.0,0.1131487658286082,0.06403311682209943,0.0,0.0,0.22840852981433765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548276920554208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379307493233721,0.04999719500404621,0.0526640486988814,0.0,0.0,0.038002562618313744,0.2932225924185383,0.0,0.09082422533740857,0.1667751504072581,0.0,0.0,0.10931819956920548,0.0,0.07767300164212436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880857243261193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04588410940954865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367261037598156
mentalhealth,hello_there_5432,2020/02/11,"“Stress Seizures??” Hello all, long story short, I have this thing where I randomly burst into a fit where all I see are flashing lights, and it feels like it lasts at least 15 seconds. It’s gotten worse over time, and yesterday I had the worst one yet. I tried to see my hand in front of my face while it was happening, and my hand looked completely black-and-white like I was looking at an x-ray on a cartoon show. This freaked me out, and after it was over I was breathing really hard. So, today, I decided to film myself trying to induce one of these fits, to see what it looked like. My parents have a bad of drinking, and I’ve documented some of the worse nights in writing. I decided to reread some of those writings to see what would happen. It didn’t work. After around 6 minutes, I was kind of zoned into the writing. Suddenly, I heard a very light, high, note. It was just my brother starting a song on the piano downstairs, but it immediately caused me to have another one of those weird fits. Looking back at the footage, it only lasted 3 seconds, and it looked like me repeatedly shaking my head and flapping my arms violently (though it was very quiet). Sorry, I didn’t mean for this post to be so long, but is this a thing? Stress-caused seizures? There’s a lot I haven’t told, so please ask questions if anything will help narrow down whatever the heck this is. I’ve asked for answers before, but no sort of counselors have come up with anything useful. Seriously, what is this?",4.733556701030928,5.745726986254297,5.087936426116837,84.49973969072167,69.51546391752578,7.881855670103092,28.6393470790378,8.07648339933343,1.7643235738831615,1167,41,233,15,20,370,162,291,0.105,0.8059999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.43799999999999994,1,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,0,1,11,13,1,2,14,0,22,7,6,3,2,38,43,16,0,2,5,2,4,4,0,2,0,3,0,0,26,13,1,0,7,4,0,3,4,8,0,5,13,18,24,5,36,27,7,43,0,0,9,0,12,23,1,7,20,157,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060109436736318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166391454375813,0.08999939752288033,0.1890275271388,0.0,0.0,0.07773876380763935,0.08441330448812848,0.0,0.0,0.08602766247138507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20771270540584866,0.0,0.08708769461936218,0.10600020521797217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903836976428776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051118608755594465,0.0722250280650688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17880273216093112,0.0,0.0905646985013223,0.0,0.10375657192653764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776441816040535,0.10681647009660017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052788793495128,0.0,0.16481808833429298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975671367108816,0.0,0.0,0.1789385755086462,0.4244877958649688,0.0,0.0,0.0859506143557272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012626966840088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487440820924284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20552156156323653,0.07689021985512871,0.0,0.0,0.11225829224549497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109761616356247,0.0,0.0,0.0968247378192382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325383297574708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476650261067285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32225072936600385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317186891922655,0.07155827590511679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23161674828116305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433114765234044,0.0,0.09932909227399496,0.0,0.05895154381852776,0.0,0.09582987459001037,0.09660426952590703,0.0,0.13727894559353354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731693350572738,0.0,0.16683425392775955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360115610455817,0.0,0.2060567003612511,0.07181771185649176,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lilyturner_21,2020/02/11,"I have this one kid in my class that won’t leave me alone I have a kid in my class who won’t leave me alone and I’m too introverted to confront them

This one boy in my class has a crush on me and has been stalking/obsessing over me for the past two weeks. I don’t really look super attractive or stand out much so I’ve never notice anyone put their attention on me. I can definitely feel a change in the atmosphere when he’s around me bc I can feel him staring at me. Every time I speak, he’s always listening and answering even tho I wasn’t talking to him. 

It’s gotten to the point where he tries to get comfortable with me and touch me. He’ll touch my shoulders/arms and tell me “let’s get ready for the bus” (since we share a bus). He doesn’t do that for the other kids in our class, especially his best guy friends?? Then today he purposefully bumped into me, and kept bumping into me while sarcastically saying “oops, sorry, lol, come on you’re in my way” when we are in a empty hallway

He’s given clear signs that he’s interested and I’ve given him clear signs that I’m NOT interested. I can tell he’s pissed with me bc he asked me if I was gay. I told him I was straight and he and his friends laughed. 

Btw, I did try to confront him a couple times. Sometimes I would straight up tell him that he’s in my personal space. Other times I would walk away from a conversation that he’s trying to start with me. 

Idk what to do and how to handle the situation. Any suggestions?",2.193861090365946,3.7828784595469287,3.7854530744336574,89.09056198655716,76.70226537216828,7.213393079412497,22.240602439631566,8.012643519586192,0.8830462036345534,1160,32,261,19,26,386,159,309,0.07200000000000001,0.768,0.16,0.9852,0,2,0,0,0,0,27.0,3,0,2,2,9,13,3,0,13,1,22,2,1,1,3,36,39,19,0,3,3,0,4,0,2,5,0,3,0,6,13,20,0,1,4,0,0,3,7,3,0,3,10,9,48,10,34,23,2,41,0,0,2,1,47,24,1,2,12,159,61,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676584125580503,0.0,0.0,0.10751838446574137,0.0,0.0,0.08787157350267018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035110152592313,0.0,0.0,0.11502997900992973,0.12079987798555653,0.0,0.12140304819583035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13560462509566126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366938029128579,0.11130847494330866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297547338054828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853462042881133,0.0,0.1088703782669717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067137456510058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19966451858605405,0.0,0.13502045695681905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794453751707455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27364299081391075,0.0,0.13213250936899756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085092202665136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498891154224057,0.0,0.09965964282523974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711371190811742,0.0,0.0,0.1751207346078574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233516615814382,0.0,0.11282676415196907,0.0,0.0,0.1221512512025404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298981577411897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277932565002159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027580565178364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688912978934073,0.14524463182493585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779830981423548,0.14464716503222785,0.09146002308804023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038592364418061,0.3388224504356543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22604134143201016,0.0,0.12248202505811953,0.12347179427517395,0.0,0.26318833233491745,0.0,0.1262256332524959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256595268376342,0.1036495906416535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18358322643867045,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idfuicodosl,2020/02/11,"I don’t know how to explain my feelings. I have a hard time of telling people how I feel. I have a hard time trusting people and I always suspect people are doing things (getting closer to me, hanging out with me), just to use me, make fun of me, and many more. I cry about everything; if somebody calls me out or tells me they don’t like me, I always end up crying and I really don’t know why I feel this way. A lot of the time, I cope by laughing and treating myself like I’m some sort of joke and maybe that’s why people always make fun of me. I haven’t felt happy in a long time; I feel burnt out, I’m tired, and I feel like I haven’t made “true” friends in six years. I don’t know how to explain my feelings to others, I’m afraid of them judging me. I create some sort of facade that people use to base opinions on me, when in reality, I’m really not like that.",2.5369600987248084,3.0833998823529427,4.217860962566846,90.443171534348,74.24064171122994,6.609461127108188,23.475524475524484,6.297961479604792,0.4301611682435209,666,17,154,4,13,225,90,187,0.077,0.731,0.193,0.9671,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,0,6,14,0,1,5,0,10,1,0,8,1,42,32,12,0,1,4,0,9,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,6,10,0,0,13,1,0,1,7,1,0,1,2,9,31,13,24,30,4,19,0,0,0,0,8,9,0,8,12,95,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911662810764137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191044485358648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25625135884987205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331012592064398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483024262594492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3538659771007475,0.08332901575879123,0.11199454155313822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011726324524157,0.0,0.060940592496038726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241674999470122,0.2089765110733619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19231005743511065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279414143469552,0.0,0.0,0.10322443464461001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916479494717048,0.0,0.11036941135138294,0.15571878365723074,0.11825660602524415,0.11718249313620464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4043241270158273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494476100950591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20390037031807653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749171318793953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720593819324529,0.13406273605027086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20148234823953196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258493219983943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105023927571133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751135765553763
mentalhealth,beeseeaye,2020/02/11,"I hope this helps someone as much as it helps me! To start, this is definitely not a sponsored post and I’m not affiliated with the company in any way. 

I had been dealing with severe depression for a few years. Therapy helped, but it still didn’t allow me to feel better, but rather cope better. Which is still great, I’m a big proponent of therapy. But for anyone who knows the heaviness of depression; it is a lot to deal with and that feeling sucks. 

That said, I’ve never had anything help me as much as when I decided to start taking Shaklee’s life strip vitamin pack (without iron for me). Hear me out! I’ve tried B12 vitamins in the past and it didn’t help, but the combination of these supplements have made a bigger impact in my day to day life than I could ever dream of in the past. 

Before, it was roughly 3 good days, and then an onset of three bad days gradually peaking/dipping overtime. Rinse and repeat. It’s been 6 months since I’ve started taking these supplements and I haven’t experienced this once. Once. It’s completely turned my life around. 

I’m not a doctor, but I’m here to say it’s worth a shot. Whatever chemical imbalance was causing my depression has been alleviated with this vitamin pack and I feel like a normal human being now. I’m not saying everything is rainbows and sunshine— it’s not an artificial feeling, but that pattern of heaviness out of no-where that happened every few days is gone. I’m no longer as sensitive to situations that would cause me to spiral. I no longer fear being triggered and spiraling— situations/thoughts that would have ruined my day/week in the past are brushed over almost effortlessly after a few minutes. I feel I’m much more consistently pleasant to be around at work. There were so many times in the past that people would ask me if I’m okay because I was feeling badly. If someone would have told me that vitamins would cure my depression, I would have told them they clearly don’t understand what I’m going through. We’re all going through something different, I get it. But this is, to my surprise, what helped me the most. 

Check them out! They’re not cheap (about $135 a month US), but they are cheaper than what I paid for therapy so it worked out in my case. I noticed a difference within a week. I was skeptical and kept waiting for my symptoms to come back, but again, 6 months later and I’m doing better than ever. I’ve just recently started creating art again. It’s been 6 years since I was motivated artistically. 

I hope this helps someone!",4.031188524590164,5.9440523647541,5.102836065573771,80.20732786885247,72.48360655737704,8.48655737704918,28.79836065573771,9.120678840339163,2.5361104918032797,2006,81,377,44,40,659,230,488,0.105,0.743,0.152,0.9593,1,0,1,0,0,0,58.0,1,0,4,6,18,21,2,1,22,1,40,9,0,6,5,77,83,31,0,13,20,0,7,1,0,6,9,4,0,1,33,22,0,2,10,3,4,4,14,10,0,1,21,13,38,11,56,52,10,59,0,5,0,0,23,18,1,7,36,247,71,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637455141512161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04507586843568626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046347802856609666,0.0,0.054546659595603696,0.11801487086956018,0.061967245948525485,0.0,0.0,0.05096884215244568,0.11068991018864016,0.04040653738250359,0.0,0.05640339689601567,0.0,0.0,0.1758702895442757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361852900193376,0.0,0.05709839908772089,0.06949824596195535,0.0,0.0,0.05292293865324022,0.0,0.0,0.25648888421494737,0.13667322858851955,0.22836365707335504,0.0,0.0,0.1385068053099434,0.0,0.06784519832504411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991661054221192,0.05584771788747233,0.0,0.05957241355310883,0.0,0.0,0.07458871481104988,0.20109321320032245,0.047353802332301805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03463101951694807,0.0,0.07534224414110863,0.05559646080865382,0.0,0.07307911484192743,0.0,0.0,0.05861534056861961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470767339127858,0.0,0.3110046564313169,0.0,0.0,0.13167132503484594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03642833716991745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14045652988843985,0.0323833558456265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05635288087218455,0.0,0.06272018505288186,0.0,0.06720228116479958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872344345689554,0.0,0.14618064211847642,0.0,0.05112284632300893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494493161368757,0.0,0.07546556933857848,0.0,0.14118208263780396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25310498251629665,0.045953464383426464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348241902292412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544814378598937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305192795530477,0.10542450650810424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488284287409228,0.0,0.10966277624339814,0.07450677908859286,0.0,0.0,0.16848843151764709,0.05102919979948689,0.0,0.0,0.187666604955745,0.0,0.10587009276330897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889518239702408,0.09967568908847996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274069908136631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05262264706928392,0.03865114113422855,0.0,0.0,0.12667574125315365,0.0,0.04500295969540105,0.0720987185678774,0.0,0.06900470949281634,0.07973233168335378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05261370890341066,0.10633917488763164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389608462614874,0.0,0.09651210088735923,0.0,0.0,0.2825204909422789,0.0,0.0,0.08537034607420653
mentalhealth,Silentwhile348,2020/02/11,"How do you get rid of suicidal thoughts caused by sexual assault? During mid-January, I was sexually assaulted by a stranger I went on a date with. It wasn’t rape, but he touched my breasts without my consent. I have been having extreme suicidal thoughts ever since. I have been told to go to therapy but I’m just not comfortable talking about it on a deep level.",3.8489047619047625,5.938528271428575,5.142857142857146,78.9704761904762,73.42857142857143,9.23809523809524,35.95238095238096,9.725611199111238,3.961095238095239,289,17,53,8,6,96,53,70,0.293,0.7070000000000001,0.0,-0.9683,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,4,4,3,0,3,0,8,2,1,2,1,11,15,3,2,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,8,1,7,1,10,7,0,8,0,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,2,36,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642202085646158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23265649207286646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437890683015788,0.0,0.14617543097248786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21276249150470755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.562680671338498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20673149790521345,0.0,0.0,0.29413613630520546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083838065592568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457702353112657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23843145227080464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479362757018194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,akromyk,2020/02/11,"How to find human connection as a lonely socially awkward adult who fears getting hurt? I have a wife and kid, I love them, but they're all I see. At work I'm surrounded by different personality who are more orderly, less open, and unwilling to reveal any vulnerabilities. Most conversation seems to lack any depth since either no one trust anyone else to reveal more, or they just find it awkward being too open.

Anyway, I'm exhausted by being an outcast at work and the lack of connection leaves me feeling worthless.  I'm socially awkward, avoid people, and because of that avoidance, I tend to come off as a jerk. I'm not into sports, been too depressed to game lately, and barely enjoy music anymore (it was my passion from 20 years ago).

I just need some group that will accept me for the screw up I am, but everyone is striving for perfection, not mutual support and acceptance. I feel like another cold human being will shatter me. I don't know how to get out of this lonely funk.",6.147580645161291,7.0426152096774235,6.949623655913983,72.84443548387098,66.25806451612904,9.855913978494623,32.16666666666667,9.928628108626363,3.273427956989248,783,31,135,17,12,260,125,186,0.225,0.63,0.145,-0.8985,1,6,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,3,7,23,2,6,6,0,12,4,0,2,2,40,28,13,0,3,8,1,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,5,7,11,0,2,10,2,0,1,4,14,0,1,2,4,14,9,23,21,9,15,0,5,1,3,16,10,1,4,4,91,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14915141324201822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228843721250946,0.17643418721403628,0.0,0.0,0.16686767284267562,0.11765057497056187,0.17240118540022045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256909848193814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14494019281457615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449211931371463,0.0,0.0,0.1757947980022383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055876808025974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16077864402077333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893381054326251,0.17015356858008893,0.12020423252152355,0.0,0.0,0.3075712769136762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17581672083101327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18012469351448188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247072243147507,0.0,0.18980343237345354,0.17816194081863934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220282731635316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151860277987303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476188463578755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140166238591472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664957502571982,0.1469172312275417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408060419181778,0.15317663511507826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13918554799479482,0.0,0.0,0.3430376346827136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909382704780972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24498904934380064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835325174032376
mentalhealth,chloemorley,2020/02/11,"I cant accept myself and I don't get why I should be here Someone helpe me please
I just don't feel right with who I am, the way I think and the things I do. I'm hurting so bad at the moment, some days worse than others.
It's not like I'm crying about it I just feel like strange in my body and just frustrated that I am me and all I want to do is escape and not be me whether that means I change myself or I'm just not here at all and I'm finding it really hard to live with myself now. I have no impact on most people and I feel like I'm nothing to the people I meet. I can't live like this, and everything is just a painful chore",1.7690344827586202,2.069085937931039,3.57396551724138,95.26508620689656,75.82758620689657,6.627586206896553,20.706896551724146,6.2581,-0.10928965517241407,491,9,127,3,10,166,77,145,0.231,0.7140000000000001,0.055,-0.9721,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,10,9,1,0,5,0,14,2,1,0,2,33,26,11,0,2,10,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,9,10,0,0,7,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,0,4,22,5,11,23,4,9,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,3,7,88,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720195204442033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19582798102625773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18650052348834556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936557140769017,0.11369800062713195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15844579777995088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674255808458518,0.25189548453552985,0.0,0.0,0.16113371010773148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210873268386377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15792890097773496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816922335707025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18873127841617346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3445223280858367,0.0,0.31134975584191044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19204083959109391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691632443097694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18759412131286468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444464775123953,0.0,0.0,0.193522901658926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294138606695435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15055802582164482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493772164902382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171249441939136,0.11296501277543278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039854714525884,0.1399376084356744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15908204884157462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17966331675402028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ele405,2020/02/11,Not sure what kind of therapy I need I've been like this for over 10 years but my problem is that I didn't want to be myself anymore because I had too much social anxiety or insecurity not sure which one ( I don't feel emotions anymore so i don't remember). But basically instead of expressing myself i start living in my head and I've created a seemingly permanent block on my brain so I can't think or feel properly. It's ruining my life but I can't go back to thinking and feeling normally on my own,1.109294871794873,3.5131646730769246,4.0150000000000015,81.71333333333338,84.96153846153845,8.082051282051282,27.89743589743589,8.841846274778883,2.7856051282051286,402,20,80,12,12,143,71,104,0.203,0.7390000000000001,0.057999999999999996,-0.9314,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,1,0,9,3,2,0,2,23,19,9,0,4,7,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,7,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,3,3,15,4,9,15,2,8,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,3,4,56,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14300757367236902,0.0,0.37078586469124464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14374430100495675,0.0,0.1139560803580062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20868538413017165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21028084660420152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835654308358079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624155624152028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185301097861088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19466786171346034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204031363585275,0.09132879331065988,0.0,0.16507027371256888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13742143457584158,0.1386126578237958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18316020934323474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266744832794794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17887506406842876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117650757345036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17018194756987798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19056043604891112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231615538103067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3523749751828805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21378066519136535,0.0,0.0,0.2395655076505373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026127313570057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038237680860515
mentalhealth,cswalters98,2020/02/11,"Occupying the Brain Okay... I think I struggle with anxiety, or something to that degree. I don't have a therapist so I won't diagnose anything but I'd like to have an opinion to see if I'm close to something. 

I often find shortness of breath in quiet moments. Sleeping is the hardest. I now mostly put on ambient sounds to distract my brain from being in silence - when I go to bed. If I'm left in quiet situation, it's just me and my brain, I start  to become incredibly scared and anxious and I lose my breath soon after. 

Furthermore, I usually read, write, watch stuff etc. Throughout my day to distract the idea of being alone with myself. Because I always have so many thoughts and it just piles on and on so I just force focus onto other things. This doesn't stop my anxiousness but it helps me, currently.

I have anxiety with others, but I'm far more better at putting that to the side because I sort of create a persona? Sounds crazy but I can settle into a character that my friends want rather than being a shaking ball of anxiety than I am. 

It's hard to describe without sounding insane really. I just wanna know if this is an anxiety attack or something related as to why I lose my breath when I'm left alone with my thoughts. It's odd. 

Thanks for you time. Hope you all are having a wonderful day.",2.8215116279069785,5.011875124031008,4.290096899224807,83.4516569767442,76.8294573643411,7.090697674418602,27.41666666666667,8.07648339933343,1.9752294573643416,1034,43,194,18,24,343,144,258,0.171,0.691,0.138,-0.6194,1,2,3,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,0,3,13,14,1,5,11,1,16,8,7,0,1,43,31,20,0,7,15,0,1,1,1,1,1,5,1,0,14,11,0,1,7,2,0,4,4,8,0,0,2,8,31,6,36,25,4,32,0,2,2,0,5,15,0,11,14,139,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22426394568931776,0.0,0.0,0.09008682710168377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3312958714642717,0.24462181323702595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909452595659846,0.0,0.0,0.1231693561218645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319971312755468,0.11957240868427647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09575337391854907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3625853744413589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13964653211082784,0.0,0.0,0.10988873821167973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074633750990428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895408757665754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364682492943344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06153063795312037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09698597697395298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256909599563716,0.0,0.0,0.1075335719274943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222027828024272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05950071838684168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352648507196056,0.0,0.0,0.052893793301734514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422461856735112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976575702286318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176765012868371,0.0,0.0,0.10829631062492727,0.0,0.06935862024418345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083941663788629,0.0,0.0862747912136937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216966577360532,0.10834520117515116,0.0,0.0,0.2500477059339265,0.0,0.0,0.07663194836482673,0.0,0.0,0.090516069936202,0.0,0.1131841882663409,0.12393982612309674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967771854897732,0.0,0.12570634565054786,0.07192779200222453,0.06937312968096336,0.0,0.17190382802458928,0.06313136537719755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924081790706112,0.0,0.06385868879913373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976941385040942,0.0,0.0,0.1043655360833176,0.11741095618920505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,steadyandsteeproad,2020/02/11,"abused and depressed and alone This will be a long string of consciousness. 

​

I \[20y, f\] told my boyfriend today how was depressed I've been for the last week. And he got mad at me. 

​

One of the biggest reasons I've been depressed is because I'm so alone. Him getting mad at me immediately for hating myself just shoved me deeper into that lonely feeling. I don't have a family, or any financial support, but I'm only 20 years old. I just move to a new place, and my bf hates hanging out with anyone so it's been hard to meet people. 

​

I don't understand how you can get mad at someone when they are feeling so awful and sobbing in front of you. I am a people pleaser and emphasizer, I feel other's emotions so much. But my emotions piss him off. 

​

I'm in college for chemistry which is stressful. And I have to pay for most of it out of pocket because I can't get loans without my parents. Thank god I'm smart enough for scholarships. 

​

Ever since moving in with my boyfriend his awful habits have rubbed off on me. I'm lazy and don't clean and don't exercise and don't eat healthy and am not ahead on my homework anymore. I am an extreme perfectionist because I have never been good enough for people in my life. 

​

My dad was emotionally and verbally abusive. Physically when I was young. The best way to describe him is a cult leader. I have anxiety and depression issues and probably something else. It's gotten exponentially worse lately.

​

I can't tell if my boyfriend is emotionally abusing me or not. He gaslights me, which we an agree on. But any emotion I feel pisses him off. He is a VERY negative person, and kind of narcissistic, and is very emotional on his own. He makes me feel like I have no right to ask to be treated well. He points out all of my flaws and makes fun of me for things that really hurt, but then gets mad at me for being sensitive when I ask him to stop. I talk about how depressed/anxious I am, and he gets mad at me because he doesn't understand. 

​

I have a ton of issues too though, so I don't know if it's all me like he's saying it is or not. I get really sad, and cry, and sometimes yell when I feel out of control or like i can't get through to him. Sometimes when he doesn't get mad and tries to help, he doesn't say the right things, or anything comforting, and I get mad. I am not trying to blame it all on him, I just don't know if it's all me.

​

I know it's really hard to deal with someone who has a mental illness. I always try to emphasize with him and tell him I know it's hard, to which he replies ""you have NO idea"" and rolls his eyes. He is really good at making me feel guilty and question my reality, so I don't know how much of it is true and how much of it isn't. What if it's all true and I'm absolutely awful?

​

Because I was abused as a child, I blame everything on myself. I feel worthless, and my brain is hardwired to react kinda extremely to situations and feel shitty. I am too scared to leave my bf bc maybe I'll go broke, maybe no one will love me, the town i live in is really hard to find housing. 

​

I just want to be worth it, you know?

Worth treating well. Worth giving me a break, and forgiving me, and taking it easy on me every once in a while.  I can't be perfect all the time, but i can't slip up. I can't be upset. I can't be weak. 

But I am. I notice my weaknesses and my fucked up emotions and my imperfections every day amd they kill me. I can;t trust myself to make the right decision. 

​

I have panic attacks when shopping and things sometimes because I buy the wrong thing and can't return it and made a mistake, It pisses my bf off more than anything. He calls me a child and gets mad. 

​

​

I'm sorry I have panic attacks, Im really sorry. Im sorry I can't handle being made fun of all the time. Im sorry I cant stop being depressed or stressed out. Im really really really sorry. I'm sorry I was abused and have problems from it.

​

I know it's selfish to ask for someone to put up my mental illness but I just want someone to feel for me and comfort me when I'm having panic attacks and when I'm triggered.",2.250189556402028,4.110148378752888,3.825564020275337,87.66688956539998,77.33718244803696,6.438655109324857,25.103566179778646,7.348242739294969,1.1545910920488294,3320,120,685,42,77,1103,310,866,0.26899999999999996,0.617,0.113,-0.9994,1,4,1,0,3,1,153.0,1,4,2,4,31,66,18,7,24,3,75,14,5,15,12,138,137,80,1,8,27,2,15,3,3,2,6,3,2,3,31,51,1,3,26,2,8,6,32,42,2,2,14,19,112,24,88,112,17,75,0,11,1,2,58,39,5,13,31,447,143,4,0.0,0.15527236383668186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05429115126645389,0.0,0.0,0.021808755492369616,0.42597660780184976,0.4777188772785138,0.03564729270760448,0.0,0.020050519284691218,0.0,0.025993200708079516,0.0183265875081388,0.0,0.043137066645778634,0.0,0.07350821951759838,0.08945271328456421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586395439701784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027505697067909642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029258942106949782,0.026763261733838986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02939665721598777,0.0,0.0,0.0287903695909641,0.016903231982656128,0.02702127964400537,0.11287284097321022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026819294449023603,0.02189502740554915,0.20637844858403892,0.0,0.05416371343539774,0.0,0.0,0.02370837581643676,0.0441659809489178,0.0,0.023555788683872567,0.0,0.02470838269399421,0.0,0.13252524542210506,0.018724374162264617,0.0,0.0,0.023955394704866004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024230651387115068,0.13693602944608652,0.02514294632713704,0.01489570319636709,0.043967279627249854,0.020962469671326943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09391577108720248,0.05175374522854538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01756795884358069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030242732023897087,0.02805826455923242,0.029587812680033524,0.1132448575427547,0.05471269992781252,0.0,0.0,0.02899739637424185,0.02729360141678629,0.10083001726967278,0.021364585361601702,0.02956593466379205,0.027752523945162377,0.0,0.0,0.018512843669229184,0.03841453325510358,0.0,0.02314384211556348,0.023194956995156817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02365547872792773,0.0496009255694146,0.06998130825715684,0.0,0.05266278082776505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05282687530264447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557140002736161,0.057801927268665065,0.0,0.02021470833692697,0.0253137068686422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02984017094863735,0.027502905108055205,0.027912712497373652,0.035521044160813385,0.019933827435679882,0.0,0.09225509186652664,0.02910301765376675,0.0,0.0,0.054511981221450886,0.022885493719165508,0.02738379094084097,0.0,0.024776848943559457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02825872989348605,0.02507935649528033,0.0,0.026348211751540212,0.029361112079292224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511167298230574,0.026948166005631047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714939286381866,0.0,0.041686365370987334,0.02624070518864649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021681119075135088,0.029461051500997645,0.0,0.0,0.08883033050118237,0.02017767915533946,0.07776685182518223,0.17603917714318534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043825338307024515,0.0600467562734124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02974270991404073,0.0,0.0,0.01970660016145248,0.021066543218990274,0.04581725574092346,0.024130575599229338,0.0,0.0,0.06965083261782297,0.0,0.02575111618178667,0.0,0.03056643364421516,0.0,0.0248439422706722,0.025044704539895945,0.0,0.05338445156944865,0.0,0.0,0.05457090817902481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04325186264810154,0.030918583213318657,0.02080421683265592,0.021024019198393716,0.0,0.0471317367584802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025265430379760947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026710150619323518,0.0,0.028656436196961982,0.4777188772785138,0.016878331026493516
mentalhealth,myproblemsgohere,2020/02/11,"What is this feeling? For the past few weeks I've been feeling like shit. I won't go into too many details because we'd be here for a while. In short, I've been having panic/anxiety attacks every night. Two days ago I showed up at work and they had to tell me to go back home because I just couldn't help but cry. Yesterday was the one day that I felt at peace in some way. I wasn't being overwhelmed by thoughts and overthinking them until it felt like they were eating me from the inside out. That feeling of peace and contentedness transcended into today... up until now.

I was just watching a video on YouTube and I felt *that feeling.* Feeling like my heart is suddenly heavy, or being squeezed. Like I can't bear with my own weight and I just want to lay down and cry and not exist. The weirdest thing is nothing inherently bad has happened today, and I had an amazing day yesterday. So, why am I feeling this? How do I stop this? And what even is it that I'm feeling?",2.0632518796992483,4.220461270408169,3.1831578947368406,90.61447368421057,79.15306122448979,5.758968850698174,24.60150375939849,6.8360192770164,0.8731163265306119,763,28,157,8,19,245,120,196,0.046,0.6990000000000001,0.255,0.992,2,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,3,1,10,10,2,1,7,0,23,4,2,1,0,35,39,16,0,2,6,0,12,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,12,13,2,1,11,2,0,2,5,4,0,2,12,13,20,6,22,21,3,33,0,1,1,0,6,12,1,2,22,111,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912760633245286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417710374530784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14005285581691965,0.0,0.09466227277972608,0.102789842085295,0.15009070256477142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704561996959509,0.23818297313781425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12596997812570873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131151814087424,0.0,0.10372360213671084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4357288969350263,0.1758964247267088,0.3546082826381915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992996045291015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108863790575964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458832950109839,0.08251654030070056,0.0,0.12348712651941833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405769434913121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12481195181980125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552829849393448,0.0,0.11812522135569375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342100804413408,0.0,0.0,0.14444043791558067,0.0,0.0,0.11752029222678645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636835231189927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292360446657188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760161335404286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178732924892426,0.0,0.0,0.09773381463845517,0.0,0.0,0.23338353440590864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025839876142135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261214978012692,0.09771721416137323,0.09874962384152336,0.14991209311079826,0.0,0.0,0.1110856102920169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962391958422446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Snappyfletch,2020/02/11,I’m new on here So I don’t usually open up about any of this but I would make an exception to online associates. When I was 7 I was laying on the down side of my parents bed when my dad died. My mom said I was always quiet which I can be at times if I’m not caught on a topic.  As until my moms fiancé a couple years later with them I started to become really annoyed and becoming depressed not a suicidal way. Then it started turning into me being crazy and just wanting to slit his throat in his sleep. He’s just a ignorant dick head. I’ve talked to my mom about him and his actions but nothing came to a conclusion. I feel like if I live with my grandma I would be distancing my mom,2.5301307596513065,3.5965926232876733,4.619240348692403,85.58509962640102,74.82191780821918,7.774844333748442,25.601494396014942,8.296473431620573,1.5603643835616432,537,18,115,9,11,186,98,146,0.157,0.7879999999999999,0.055,-0.9456,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,1,8,4,1,0,7,0,10,4,4,1,0,24,21,13,2,5,9,6,1,1,0,2,0,2,1,0,3,8,0,1,2,0,0,3,3,3,0,0,6,3,23,1,22,10,0,25,0,1,0,1,14,10,1,2,12,81,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650061939115745,0.0,0.0,0.0952124865975692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.309262966006946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16013563012798807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15491984267941786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059152930958765,0.0,0.145309626611546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079392119390872,0.10002410217212232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14369198918218895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684024499458118,0.0,0.12363254485097347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345863133518546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6559181791939047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13522378800178772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13434462045881926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554659817247197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969482529829735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318281053111242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011241655472573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982014404742344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314963970722695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253578106745456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816417161762324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229209139121558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420266857884707,0.0,0.08258229352676577,0.11113445459097182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19892002373554024,0.0,0.0,0.09016268808018232
mentalhealth,BadLuckLuc,2020/02/11,"my anxiety is stopping me from having an education and I'm getting kinda annoyed. I don't use reddit much, but the rest of the internet isn't being much help.

I'm 17 afab and for the past 6 months have had a currently undiagnosed medical problem. I ended up taking a lot of time off school last year and doctors think it is connected to my anxiety and depression which i have had for years now. I've made a lot of lifestyle changes to try to manage symptoms and get better, but all the normal advice doesn't seem to help.

I'm in my final year of highschool and am tired of having to take time off school because I'm too sick/sad to attend. I am on a mental health waiting list, but its been four months and I have a friend who's been on the same list for seven months, so I won't be hearing from them anytime soon.

Any advice to deal with panic attacks and the vague but overpowering feeling that something is very wrong would be welcome. Once again I don't use reddit much so I'm happy to include more info if it is needed.",4.90378021978022,5.159024923809525,5.937619047619048,81.26456043956046,68.80952380952381,8.366300366300367,29.48717948717949,8.139509932561175,1.9541135531135536,814,28,162,10,13,271,125,210,0.174,0.74,0.086,-0.9493,2,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,1,6,10,2,1,12,0,24,5,0,3,1,32,42,15,0,5,5,0,1,0,1,2,5,1,0,0,6,9,0,2,4,0,0,1,5,6,0,2,5,2,12,4,25,32,9,24,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,5,17,109,18,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23799126753113714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828101411208523,0.0,0.18631275537594447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853491150082342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423198218852406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769874585190488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12882019358872368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554310920272235,0.10488331853273224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464031515410955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078551576029964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061572329576315775,0.0,0.0,0.1333968933761556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408188736051107,0.0,0.12724323292624762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296301321541509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943951318330987,0.1372475604140434,0.0,0.16324439142969138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926163780764848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20705491339564175,0.0,0.11522500964713901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267396829549675,0.1227190248266018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29159528608099305,0.0,0.2685525542395141,0.09029349126746343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931215390086118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968478026833144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14287493937240908,0.0,0.0,0.11624656411484555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652077298713286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24648252268768175,0.0,0.11085800126792417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374717300696957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180808062037196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656927031776585,0.1831170017614228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802752797845773,0.0,0.0,0.14201418909429006,0.13996069984947648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267619843086117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210346374374655,0.0,0.10047587285260916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650438522274624,0.13314018233900218,0.0,0.2352543828199705
mentalhealth,SuddenPanic7,2020/02/11,"Having a rough year Hey, so I just needed somewhere to vent to, since I have nowhere else to go to. I'm now in 12th grade, so that means I need to decide what to do post-secondary. My parents insist on me going to university since if I don't I'd probably be considered a disappointment, at least more of a disappointment than I already am. Even though they don't express it in words I can tell that they don't want me to stay in my hometown to study and move away like the children of their friends, as it's brought up a lot.

  
 I haven't been doing very well academically and I feel like such a disappointment. These past few weeks it's like I've been living in a cycle of fear. I would do badly on an assignment, I would be worried/scared about the results, the results would be given back and then I will feel scared about what my parents will say until the next assessment. I don't know if I can live like this it honestly feels horrible, it's been affecting my sleep schedule and I always feel tired. 

  
It doesn't help that my mom keeps telling how messy my room is like I know, I've been stressed and studying and sorry, I will find a time for cleaning, just not right now, but I guess she thinks I'm giving her attitude when I'm trying and I just want to be alone sometimes. Whenever I do close my door for privacy, my mom thinks I'm being rude and that I have no right to be angry at them when this is all my fault, but I just want to be alone sometimes. 

  
My little brother doesn't help either. He's eight years younger than I am, so I know that he's not matured yet, so I can't be mad at him, but I am sometimes. He's pretty much better than me at everything and loves to rub it in my face. As the older sibling I know I should let it go, but it's hard sometimes. I don't feel comfortable sharing any of this with my parents or friends as I don't feel like it would turn out that great and at this point, I know it could be worse, and I don't want to make it all about me, as my parents are also worried, but I don't know what to do, I don't think I can go on like this.",4.343552036199096,4.0226557081447964,5.189321266968324,88.13656108597286,69.97285067873304,8.338461538461539,28.08597285067873,7.748469712250963,1.3603638009049774,1621,49,377,17,26,530,197,442,0.14800000000000002,0.737,0.115,-0.7134,4,2,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,4,1,23,26,2,3,13,0,53,4,2,5,2,70,91,34,0,14,15,7,9,7,2,8,1,1,3,1,27,14,0,1,18,0,0,6,16,10,1,1,6,10,58,16,49,66,8,45,0,3,0,1,30,22,0,5,23,252,85,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16141307581133288,0.08599189698197228,0.0623163927079271,0.06483963263854743,0.0,0.0,0.05299150069632667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732128657376328,0.05991932109452145,0.065063909541828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06891810699218365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221657036949189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509612774940063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146856103384747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003373875725896,0.0,0.0,0.08768700570877164,0.23640656335963095,0.11133891087849797,0.0,0.0,0.07122180781559799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040893378747905,0.0,0.0,0.07475251872454029,0.17714571993495026,0.0,0.0,0.08591230961103448,0.08584289507840545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980526809967089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446263181091993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692630963213238,0.0,0.0,0.2569524210844609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968333424713117,0.0,0.2664906697036661,0.07810106891866027,0.13761796001085133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624883401279537,0.07033012732635995,0.0,0.05201537429023157,0.0,0.0,0.0848828948390651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825290457773556,0.0,0.08282167480462425,0.05728365581140976,0.11556042631036413,0.0,0.0,0.08287385338306931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34610484289277754,0.0,0.07438798919865937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366407422941956,0.0,0.07463036805730196,0.07927748302326586,0.08401605794363867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309461779283538,0.0,0.06196888716636712,0.07801626668718249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289203133591202,0.0,0.0779810241781178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082782726454598,0.08723037543300688,0.0,0.08305741299810526,0.0,0.0,0.08926253539012505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13621932859888594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14979309589035034,0.0765606691240951,0.0,0.04543854712972674,0.08956303446830262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052905788680215324,0.0847597490139353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642960779219388,0.18384814098698635,0.0,0.0625065323826738,0.0,0.07006370670957827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913636400621102,0.07941197536389231,0.22142202042991946,0.0,0.0,0.10036196551357887
mentalhealth,tj3883,2020/02/11,My anxiety makes me gag/vomit I've had anxiety for YEARS and have never had this problem until last year. Why does my anxiety make me gag all of the time? I went to the doctors and they gave me Prilosec for acid reflux and it didn't do anything. Does anyone else have this issue?,1.5815789473684239,3.8820625087719303,3.0202631578947354,90.32934210526315,81.80701754385964,5.905263157894738,21.780701754385966,7.1686216300943375,0.7430491228070184,221,7,45,3,6,72,42,57,0.18600000000000005,0.8140000000000001,0.0,-0.8395,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,2,2,8,10,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,1,7,0,5,5,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,28,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5006823420622198,0.0,0.0,0.1525446569121857,0.22353379645370336,0.17952957769022956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22329909647825125,0.3818318599189985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822472100809343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277055135202074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17783198004589226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912510213266117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16826077121378893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087525476552544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127212612037434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20223930626291325,0.19685819347638456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809796656953548
mentalhealth,ChappyMault,2020/02/11,"Medication doesn't work, but I keep taking it anyway At the age of six, I started taking Adderall. 

I had a very rough childhood, and always stood out/ or lacked the skills needed at the time. The teacher got annoyed about how I acted clingily and tried to show off to fit in, so she complained to my mother. I'd never had any interaction with children or any other adults except my family before kindergarten. My lack of social skills made me a prime target for bullies at a very young age. Everyone in my class saw me as a secondary person and someone to pick at. They'd gag at me and refuse to get near me. I stayed near the teachers because they were the only people who'd speak to me.

My mom was told I was hyperactive, and with only a quick visit to the doctor's office, put me on Adderall. I wasn't interviewed, but instead, my mother was briefly questioned and they gave me a prescription. I was terribly afraid of medication and pills as a little kid. I was forced to wear these burning patches every day until the age of 9. There are very faint scars on my hips from them.

So, now I'm looking back.. as a 19-year-old and seeing how strange my life was. I've taken medication all my life and it's done nothing for me. My family refuses to take no for an answer even if it's clearly uneffective, but is it bad to take 4 pills a night for sake of others? Medication feels like a chore and I just go in, say hi to my psychiatrist, and leave.  I've haven't been in so much emotional pain and every day I have no energy and can barely speak without slurring. 

I want to stop taking my medication to see if it can improve my quality of life. How can I do this without people wanting to intervene?",4.501689111196615,5.364309557522127,5.717552904963447,80.32257021931512,69.94395280235987,8.255534179812749,28.60343721944338,8.456263369488248,2.021211517250224,1336,47,260,20,23,447,186,339,0.142,0.804,0.054000000000000006,-0.9829,0,1,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,4,3,15,7,1,1,19,0,23,15,2,5,3,47,47,30,0,7,11,3,2,1,0,0,13,3,1,4,10,16,0,4,3,1,0,4,8,6,0,1,19,9,39,1,50,26,4,38,0,0,4,0,27,17,0,5,17,181,49,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160789311694364,0.0,0.0,0.1333914011832733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541513349991551,0.08189017055755701,0.05978680861253615,0.0,0.08345627499324378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265030596958307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038593134425232,0.0,0.1003667885794997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032338679349983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477891155163723,0.0,0.1652681490214016,0.09371674472449178,0.0,0.0,0.1849164712483948,0.0,0.04959066127128543,0.07006620464200188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05124116714869298,0.0,0.05573940038789258,0.0,0.0784411098103859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871753144106924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038493465908516,0.0,0.0,0.20782398628537987,0.047915451894486594,0.09829888642589113,0.0,0.0,0.08235995075366924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280279733950213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4940111288956689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486655809398065,0.0,0.0,0.0720978554407498,0.07272282811545483,0.07564300300983752,0.0,0.0,0.09203858937775407,0.0,0.09410749474583337,0.0,0.10291527828118828,0.0,0.0,0.14918390545959653,0.10436080756096078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359884394035985,0.08563702436003684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859444062246492,0.10986864872687588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799474047979618,0.0,0.0,0.15630928886210382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997711647667466,0.08310029565441754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941938186413316,0.10453699699849298,0.0,0.08199673579780573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687083658296861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057189468025262064,0.0,0.0,0.09371674472449178,0.0,0.06658782248121238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427713070557801,0.1156966721499834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18908539212212352,0.0,0.07140119988411646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315835100652116
mentalhealth,JamesBerry123xx,2020/02/11,"I feel like something is wrong with me First off I want to say I haven’t been diagnosed w/ anything other than Aspergers (idk how to explain it other than saying it’s pretty mild and I fully have a grasp on it). I went to therapy (in the UK, it was private if that matters) a few years ago for self harm, it didn’t last long because I didn’t want it at the time (In my experience it is true that it only helps if you let it) and I wasn’t diagnosed w/ anything. 

For months I have felt a building sense of apathy, I have absolutely no motivation. I am in the process of doing my A levels and have been predicted 3 A*s but this has really been effecting my grades. I haven’t achieved higher than a C in months. This is due to the fact that I spent most of college staring blankly out a window or down at the desk. At home I spend all my free time sitting in bed staring at the wall, or inanely staring at a computer screen that I have no interest in- I play videos on YouTube so I don’t have to sit in silence. I turn to food and masterbation for fleeting moments of joy but they just make me feel worse in the end. I occasionally go out with friends when I can’t avoid it, and I do enjoy it to begin with; however after an hour or two I get this overwhelming feeling of doom... it’s feels heavy and like the last few hours of fun never happened. I feel tired of life and I often catch myself thinking about how much easier it would be if it stopped. I would never act on these thoughts but it still scares me when my mind thinks about jumping in front of a train at the station. I haven’t cut for over a year but the temptation increasing...

Overall I just don’t feel like myself and I don’t know what to do",2.3896755706653714,3.877196321126764,3.8759689169499763,89.07704225352111,75.92957746478874,7.1500728508984945,25.480815930063137,7.873277556716777,1.270941719281204,1334,47,294,20,29,442,185,355,0.07200000000000001,0.77,0.157,0.9841,1,1,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,1,4,11,18,1,3,20,0,32,5,0,5,5,58,54,23,0,7,12,0,7,3,1,2,4,2,3,1,26,13,1,2,15,2,3,7,14,7,0,2,11,13,39,12,52,39,6,58,1,2,4,0,8,25,0,8,27,207,65,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527959684518784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19546990364384528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723991352293183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24109159164553526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10519212757443992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617671402952914,0.0,0.0,0.3603123573388016,0.16969404263594454,0.11403474729813,0.0,0.0,0.10102297424916236,0.14361327865792894,0.0,0.09175893038049784,0.0,0.062050747912449175,0.0,0.06749790597516504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502508364346012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960687847813609,0.0,0.11913277796938962,0.0,0.2339227365545841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527112392674522,0.19362157729988655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144709349513008,0.08388849890774676,0.17407036912263485,0.0,0.0,0.1051048752595264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927775719095706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992060526730852,0.0,0.1895970436353984,0.0,0.08730725902476404,0.0,0.1832005464467172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032749862435747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208285268651618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608504939240042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888962429745191,0.1189062797637685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389966814962138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143248039181634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484731505390333,0.0992943577547515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582017949352782,0.0,0.0,0.15220193192133585,0.0,0.09428756800486124,0.13850774528164214,0.1365049583272316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291841670579914,0.11601790018448488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010346440890967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009800785144157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210335095509488,0.16873704565143233,0.1298528448443843,0.0,0.15296384274383526
mentalhealth,SpaceCowboy2525,2020/02/11,"Overthinking? I want to start off this post by saying I have worked through a lot of issues in my life, by myself. I’ve worked through depression, heaps of anxiety, drug dependency and existential issues (for the most part). I’ve turned my life around tremendously but I still have a select few issues that make me feel abnormal to a degree and I think really hurt my chances of connecting with other people and being the best version of myself. I constantly overthink, while I’ve managed to find ways to reduce this even on my best days I’m susceptible to it. When I accomplish something I have a great amount of relief and I’m upbeat and confident, but whenever I solve one problem my mind immediately goes to another. Eventually it will go to the thought of myself dying, and I’ll stress over this, even though I’m very young. I’m too in my own head a lot, and sometimes In person this really takes a toll on connecting with people, and hinders my conversational skills. I feel as if this stems from a deep rooted insecurity and thoughts like I’m not “good enough” or at least “not yet”. How do I work around this, any advice?",5.409131782945738,6.693600641860467,6.135813953488372,76.60108527131786,68.16279069767441,9.64031007751938,28.75193798449613,9.888512548439397,2.7416728682170537,898,31,167,21,15,294,128,215,0.098,0.736,0.16699999999999998,0.9593,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,7,10,11,0,2,10,0,6,4,1,4,0,35,22,18,1,3,6,0,2,1,0,1,3,1,0,1,10,13,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,2,3,21,6,32,18,12,22,0,2,0,0,3,11,0,6,9,114,31,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078676132080962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405660303648163,0.12961210694919362,0.0945585716151216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220071836602281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594346200305733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13357462611474655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971591405013419,0.0,0.10646202689340367,0.0,0.12828394717902394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433442026983747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12771847210292475,0.0,0.16328174695308972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499823802195024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297402693695174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702483759872838,0.10367519913884883,0.0,0.1362765124600938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12685584554954826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232322719670978,0.0,0.0,0.3870389600081913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17461373733426644,0.060387852342517215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21017151313207927,0.0,0.0,0.08250824398356939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480724617649795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375890794730348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338537055782279,0.0,0.1713862537929811,0.1079283566707112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838078068798688,0.0,0.0,0.1182746488282112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15837087327405305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829678496946058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515825961145402,0.12224990823069827,0.0,0.08748925901714086,0.0,0.09871224526198602,0.0,0.14159073445220896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293664349531423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920200178902535,0.12144267832025332,0.19625937819668451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344482885503571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198824014549447,0.07290626799992407,0.09811302138040902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699608338355283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bionicbutter4354,2020/02/11,"I almost cut myself again today My mental health has shot downward as of late.
I fell as if I dont matter to anyone. My mom hates me. People make fun of me for my sexuality. I dont feel as if my friends care about me. But I don't deserve to get better I probably deserve all of this",-0.9180645161290322,1.1506335645161307,2.4679838709677417,91.17197580645157,92.38709677419355,4.390322580645162,17.427419354838708,5.985473137389443,-0.28420000000000023,219,6,49,2,8,79,42,62,0.09,0.716,0.19399999999999998,0.828,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,6,2,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,8,9,6,0,2,3,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,1,14,4,10,9,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,3,3,34,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316573141936283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617609053413788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046047169869626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358703368653336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5422662247393321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11697433398633444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17873558122456254,0.0,0.12086754332859567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284040244606012,0.0,0.2459075521475342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609657884401615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15442372694349815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23314005325642145,0.0,0.0,0.2709469643254407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038460388798734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24942765418481466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21928679259944894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MarieMewMew,2020/02/11,"Has anyone else overcome their illness (sorta) and found themselves wondering who they are, without it? I’ve recently gotten meds for my mental illnesses, now that they’re under control, I come to realize that without it I’m a very boring person? It’s like all I’ve ever known was mental illnesses, since it took over a big chunk of my entire life. I always focused and fixing this and doing this, to subdue it. Now that the medicine has been working wonderfully.. it feels like there’s nothing else *to me*.. I don’t even know how to start with being a normal hobby having human. I’m confused, lost, I don’t know what to do or how to start. Has anyone else overcome their illness and found themselves wondering who they are, without it?",4.050761904761902,6.19052188571429,4.8900000000000015,80.78333333333335,73.0,6.666666666666666,27.380952380952376,7.492282038375204,1.7689523809523804,584,22,99,7,12,189,83,140,0.138,0.8079999999999999,0.054000000000000006,-0.8986,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,4,3,7,5,0,1,4,0,13,5,0,3,2,28,29,7,0,1,4,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,0,2,15,6,0,1,10,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,7,1,11,2,14,21,1,11,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,6,8,70,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850637956434488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823626901565326,0.2672281369098794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233129748871304,0.0,0.0,0.14625891178966716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3268068398129554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613045743644754,0.11795767191266295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659360621776885,0.09316047633558673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28596199671811817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14333299864910368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210803627431104,0.12741738603176395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235111475979234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484918636696856,0.0,0.2628326492445922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776800313216036,0.12512593028358548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386353837925445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287579866891412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787134261601793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18460091321994748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448833819684143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075967637631094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3771137302541695,0.42425196403794,0.0949354945957678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,udonthavetoknow,2020/02/11,"I want to change but I don’t know how tl;dr at the end

so, i (f15), recently decided i wanted to change things about myself because it affects me and other people in my life negatively. i want to be overall more positive and more confident. i’m more comfortable with my exterior. i do have things i would change but nothing that affects my mental health, i’m quite satisfied with what i look like in the mirror. 

my problem is my personality. i’ve had a lot of people leave me and make me feel excluded or like a second choice throughout my life. i use to be numb and not care until one day it really hit. since then i’ve become a big people-pleaser.  i put other people’s happiness before mine. it got really bad when i got in a relationship because it was the first time in my life i truly felt cared about. when i thought i did something wrong i apologized 10, 20 or even 30 times. i had a bad sense of boundaries, terrible separation issues where i could sob for an hour or two when i had to leave. i was really clingy too. overtime i’ve improved these things but only recently (1/2 months max, 3 days minimum) the amount of times i say sorry have lowered to 1, 2 or 3. i stopped crying when i had to leave and became way less clingy. so i’ve been able to work a little on these but i’ve just been guessing along, if anyone could give me advice for these it’d be of great help!

but i think the biggest core of this is loving myself. i don’t know, obviously these things affect each other greatly. those habits make it harder to love myself because i hate i have them. especially because it caused my boyfriend to break up with me 3 days ago. and on the other side, loving myself would help those habits because it would help me realize i matter too.

and, i’ve overall been positive but if you guys have anything on how to keep being positive, i’d love to hear them!

note: i’m on a waiting list for therapy

tl;dr: i have problems w putting myself in other people’s shoes, boundaries/separation issues, people-pleasing habits, loving myself (more personality wise) and being positive. i’ve been improving a lot on all of them but would live to hear some tips !",4.055193661971831,5.4822788474178425,5.307508802816901,80.72140404929578,71.55868544600938,8.141901408450705,26.69278169014085,8.660442795831766,1.9465542253521133,1703,57,326,30,32,567,203,426,0.115,0.654,0.231,0.9967,1,0,1,0,0,0,53.0,0,1,3,3,15,23,1,0,15,0,33,11,1,9,2,66,66,31,0,13,15,0,2,2,0,4,5,3,0,3,26,13,0,3,8,0,0,2,4,9,0,4,15,6,53,14,41,38,11,42,0,1,1,5,21,18,1,10,22,218,79,1,0.07342890100603337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175387222893187,0.06509029029548369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051343194890406105,0.0,0.06042572898012419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12262013042558766,0.22380788255429707,0.08109645214540395,0.062482586462026236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973131671073445,0.07543170825488411,0.2330341228187008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725400497852573,0.0,0.0806581997995661,0.14206669958242502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503621143884361,0.0,0.0,0.04849909659002627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03712785864026392,0.0,0.0705032601551673,0.0,0.0,0.06245858568456052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043969275894504,0.0,0.0,0.11745559998457898,0.1619112451718889,0.08089021290564442,0.0727061564713438,0.0,0.07816643052578859,0.0,0.07249583771112796,0.0,0.078051488079202,0.1655194161675437,0.0,0.1476535335886219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231267636521063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532813904457914,0.0,0.06526698106836626,0.0,0.0,0.08070920732251134,0.0,0.0,0.233251811607208,0.0,0.0,0.155595012993456,0.07174730398898556,0.07359504927249465,0.06483906486815684,0.0,0.061661783303783475,0.0,0.0,0.12485325158596125,0.3313622500682331,0.0,0.09802872321257622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07399906155224832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05861024823043695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704570109037006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04975732367658284,0.055845988048092265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036254175868556,0.1282305681474479,0.0,0.1612057660389916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405230829461629,0.0,0.14763265341921855,0.0,0.07810067476199814,0.0,0.0,0.1411213027168025,0.0,0.14500436242967055,0.0788351596814073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05839360930027949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06074114570551676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056529155405969575,0.0,0.08219764296358456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613898491695811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397234769257682,0.0,0.19513159620075493,0.047050274835593785,0.0,0.058294345310955675,0.1284509480285935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172936664627573,0.0,0.0,0.0634189944331608,0.0,0.0,0.12993080487174752,0.058284443784580996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05345711446638246,0.0,0.0,0.20864713798637685,0.08028297618810376,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LAcat13,2020/02/11,Learning to not avoid Recently I’ve been considering therapy and getting help for my anxiety. I’m about to graduate college and I feel it’s time to face reality. It’s really been taking a tole on me and I just want to be happy. I usually find something to distract myself or resort to drugs for cheap thrills. I am very reluctant and scared for therapy but feel I have to do it. Any advice on first time sessions ?,2.6498780487804865,4.975447097560977,4.956280487804875,77.78490853658538,78.02439024390246,8.978048780487804,29.76219512195122,9.516144504307137,3.2967268292682923,330,16,61,10,8,115,57,82,0.085,0.805,0.109,0.2181,0,1,2,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,3,1,0,6,2,1,0,0,14,12,6,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,2,2,8,2,13,9,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,5,40,11,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21762119773817254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514445658660917,0.0,0.17036593568924746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582628819493758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252090044971798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035450142588459,0.18942966844130515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635227225244475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23706974558344315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149272031514016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266819787145835,0.0,0.21989073236720225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229629182732808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17144639201247347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744371196027252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5093568420514178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597179152589815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24527409201087425,0.18375195040391465,0.13135503586045927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Andy_Bru,2020/02/12,"How do I fix myself? Hey everyone, I’m a guy in my twenties and I have been told (and recognize) that I need to fix myself mentally. I used to have so much motivation and was genuinely happy (in high school of all places), however, I’ve found it hard to find that motivation and happiness since. I had cleared goals, worked hard, and maintained the mindset that I could achieve anything I put my mind to. Nowadays, it feels like I can’t get off my ass and go pursue those dreams even though I have the time. I drink and smoke weed and cigarettes constantly and generally have terrible self discipline whenever I get a chance to “feel good”. I’ve gained a lot of weight and the body I worked hard to maintain in high school has all but disappeared. I rarely have the chance to talk to any of my HS friends and find it hard to make new friends at the small college I currently attend. I genuinely think I’m a nice guy and good friend, yet I don’t even know where to begin to get back on track to where I previously was.

Obviously I don’t expect anyone here to “fix” me but I’d really appreciate it if anyone who’s experienced anything similar could tell me what they did to better themselves and where they are today. It would mean a lot to me.",5.533414634146342,5.818890227642277,6.107626016260163,80.48412195121955,67.45528455284554,10.299837398373985,30.627642276422762,10.203070172399654,2.823136910569106,980,35,203,23,15,319,136,246,0.047,0.757,0.196,0.9891,2,0,3,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,8,11,11,0,0,10,0,19,4,2,5,4,43,36,19,0,6,3,0,7,1,3,1,0,0,0,3,11,13,2,1,10,2,0,4,3,1,0,0,7,8,29,10,24,26,5,25,0,0,0,1,13,13,1,3,9,125,40,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736880712125146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15153474867885566,0.0,0.1783410182066942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332164860023851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583503598009564,0.0,0.12036280575601625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709795787317898,0.0,0.17303224131198633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615090643658456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14314065240015775,0.0,0.0,0.1035419989265299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095794825399104,0.0774119385725124,0.0,0.0,0.1980769586532436,0.0,0.0,0.11881043010274844,0.2511544862184784,0.0,0.16983985805849958,0.0,0.061583113584399975,0.1817733570270364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145855779292252,0.0,0.2307010779156232,0.3882747609820975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22897519719067602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595514628267306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05293890310859846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842464823352068,0.0,0.0,0.07233070500888608,0.0,0.0,0.11803509463658195,0.0,0.0,0.10920073457375012,0.0,0.10941204987905696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965658743906724,0.08034708218686983,0.0,0.10465413178439248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321245366197702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893107197763308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941777187178022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193308867562911,0.0,0.0,0.11304243037606235,0.0,0.0,0.08963597092660816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709513789199005,0.09471084470543636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943229368275095,0.10646250746556342,0.0,0.0631852061687433,0.0,0.10271199006651964,0.1035419989265299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358768385380037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13195249148697138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15777378916623966,0.0,0.0,0.07697537055498878,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Usefuleyht,2020/02/12,"Can someone develop clinical depression if they have no family history of depression? The way I see it is that clinical depression is a combination of genetics and environmental factors. 50% is genetic and 50% is environmental. The problem is, environmental factors are extremely hard to avoid. Even small things that almost everybody goes through like break up, low self esteem, stress, or lack of sleep can trigger those genes, causing full-blown depression. That’s why if depression runs in your family, there is an extremely high chance you will inherit it. Clinical depression can be triggered by trauma, yes. But most people who experienced trauma don’t get clinical depression because they don’t have the right genetics for it. Do you agree or disagree? I know there have been a few cases of people getting clinically depressed without family history but it almost never happens.",7.745653153153152,10.524094060810814,8.275405405405403,57.6990990990991,64.47297297297297,13.041441441441442,40.03603603603604,12.161744961471696,6.581390090090089,723,41,96,30,12,239,96,148,0.225,0.732,0.043,-0.9690000000000001,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,3,2,0,3,15,0,2,6,1,19,6,1,3,1,20,24,8,0,4,7,0,1,1,0,1,5,0,0,1,10,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,5,14,0,0,1,3,7,1,11,21,3,13,0,9,1,0,7,9,0,7,2,69,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276174793063463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928283499033774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167546588711983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7831248404697141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506784095086662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214305378179628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875975355308785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050445377377447,0.0,0.1018122647686344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008240423797345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06246163706689284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055525933297551865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765749196730513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15758768240754562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875217459924114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706047147226872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056806107408974,0.0,0.11856661321407125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137367550714878,0.0,0.09629923732483807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301910462414205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550711589491417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021379084472313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025556663557016,0.0,0.0,0.10955905094701356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clvvvy,2020/02/12,"Feel free to message me! I’ve suffered from mental health for a few years now. I’ve been taking sertraline for over a year, and have not long started opening up about my feelings, and it’s probably one of the best things I’ve ever done. 
If anybody need advice, or somebody to vent to: my messages are always open! 

SPEAK UP, YOU’RE NOT ALONE!",4.180298507462688,5.598353000000002,4.430029850746268,87.16832835820897,71.23880597014927,6.554029850746268,28.32537313432836,6.742157984588678,1.3410023880597015,269,10,52,2,5,84,55,67,0.045,0.804,0.15,0.8156,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,1,12,9,4,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,2,3,3,3,11,7,2,11,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,2,6,34,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525122124225173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26763159621640226,0.0,0.0,0.21501522468257447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711820780959576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644399551666529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23374381701026545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26131656554650234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746744297627213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286819571873887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26041335706777385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19160542723961424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751031894935305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27860632209930364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829017196590633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942898146080307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17167404886869114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.332811117002812
mentalhealth,1VioletLuna1,2020/02/12,"Diagnosed with DPD Adult child of an alcoholic, depressed and anxious for forever. 28 now and I've been going to therapy for about a year and a half. Diagnosed today with Dependant Personality Disorder. My first instinct was 'no way, that's not me'. But the reality is that I've been wanting to do the same thing (break up with my controlling bf, move out, start my art goals) for 3 years (1.5 in therapy) and have made no action towards it.

 
Had a harsh therapy session in which I was told my fantasy brain that helped me out of traumatic childhood experiences is making me disillusioned. I disassociate from the reality of not being happy where I am and that I am so fearful of making actions. Even if it's towards a life I want because others will be upset.


In trying to leave a shitty relationship for years, I was mad to hear that I was ""dependent and not willing or ready to change"". I've known for a long time now that I'm unhappy and working on my healing to deserve better in my head.


It makes me want to prove myself wrong. It makes me sooo frustrated that I have the insight but no action towards my goals for years. That I value so much of what others want that I have such a hard time with what I want. 
It makes me so sad that I'm happier and more ""safe"" not making waves and staying in this relationship. That being aware of how unhappy I am seems too scary for my traumatic child brain self  to process so I go back to not making waves. I'm upset with myself and frustrated. Everyone is tired of me being in this shitty relationship but no one more than me. 


It hurts to make goals and now have your therapist tell you that your goals are not set in reality. The reality is that I am incapable of leaving now.


I want it to be now. And it's hard not to slip into hopeless. Just needing to vent about the progression and slow work of mental health. That the mental illness has such deep roots in me that it holds this much power is beyond frustrating. 


If anyone else has depression and or anxiety and experience with DPD please reach out. I'd love to hear from you.",4.554538676607642,5.769330321867328,5.771408963822759,78.68140049140052,70.1056511056511,9.348436838092011,29.022197746335678,9.668497473035632,2.667167482843345,1639,61,318,38,29,548,188,407,0.22899999999999998,0.7140000000000001,0.057,-0.9973,1,0,1,0,0,1,39.0,0,4,0,11,21,17,4,3,15,0,31,12,3,14,1,68,58,27,0,9,15,0,2,0,1,2,8,2,0,5,33,25,1,3,4,2,0,6,11,13,0,3,9,4,38,4,59,42,5,48,0,5,0,1,19,20,0,7,18,235,71,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813175554893506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308675179986836,0.09316382693396948,0.0,0.05766259023262624,0.08449681535206577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341175370838002,0.0,0.0502708966596531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729350390960239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18412008112300465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723876755882158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249334599262922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205678770344296,0.16740380186497025,0.0,0.0,0.09451391089994228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889029356161469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0544684361635978,0.0,0.0,0.07880040595336549,0.0,0.16133639073831027,0.0,0.09279789403251996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014607954424673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373538082389753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778726884792705,0.1477478178132592,0.0,0.08463456147710015,0.08765817911730149,0.18589178741964169,0.0,0.05527564864823626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882822408262928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17464052327912813,0.0,0.0,0.05824862474071388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298037892112448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442935985978501,0.07803192615641005,0.440376965999095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16621394804098966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764898447600343,0.12124493427082073,0.061147966613879175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055881527675853096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07200668678844517,0.0,0.0905236034695996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656149184912959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507452935154221,0.08603068799076836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058370310321884215,0.0878984628077271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207947584892799,0.0,0.28292336031313786,0.09575012200029567,0.05478716944465463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617391875690982,0.09478326822361864,0.07816872957284565,0.07880040595336549,0.0,0.05598943346245882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918457558360812,0.0654581781687067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007338822888852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901643220386222,0.0,0.21242324253963807
mentalhealth,anon3567689,2020/02/12,"Friend Long story short i have an online friend i do care a lot about and they suffer from anxiety and depression like myself, recently they've been saying no one cares and they're only there when they want some thing, ive stuck by them for years, saying such as i don't care hurts as I've been going through my own mental battles too, should i have been there more for them, messaging them, now they've shut down thier social medias and saying hurtful things, i get that they're having a rough time but so am i , sometimes i can't really be  there for them as I'm not always able to be there...i feel bad i haven't said more..",5.857541528239203,5.155903635658916,5.958383167220379,85.16720930232562,66.90697674418604,8.921816168327796,24.630121816168327,7.957251820313856,1.0736214839424134,495,8,106,5,7,157,83,129,0.14300000000000002,0.737,0.121,-0.5751,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,6,0,9,12,1,0,3,0,15,0,0,0,0,11,25,10,0,2,2,0,2,1,2,1,0,4,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,5,6,17,6,12,17,5,10,0,4,0,0,14,3,0,2,7,70,20,0,0.1631676828748197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576858324239716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248228307896494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362381996818076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4990809817406679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14053608616813434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250248310182319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25212589406829605,0.0,0.0852483798043365,0.0,0.09273195437848747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3493487584635612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971548793462245,0.0,0.0,0.1443982647566747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13871932904861473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16443464688923262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056664472880147,0.12409637544368762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452939579691592,0.0,0.1611084021429508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520983143736142,0.3892724714799115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632890450004795,0.0,0.0,0.16137701055004453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21680271644761534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951443880440544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624052688845867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050746381087623
mentalhealth,no_self_respect-,2020/02/12,"I Scream to cope with anxiety? Anytime negative thoughts, bad memories, or overall being reminded of something unpleasant makes me scream and the worse part is I can't control it. I used to do this occasionally when by myself but it is getting worse and worse to the point I no longer have the ability to stop or prevent it only running out the classroom to avoid stares when I do. I sometimes indulge in constant hypothetical situations that cause me to have to explain the reason why I am doing what I am doing/defending my character or personality over ridiculous things sometimes. I have to hit myself for it to stop when it gets really bad. Politics, people arguing, or just a nasty stare can trigger me to have anxiety attacks I don't want people to tiptoe over my feelings for this to not happen so I avoid social contact. I do think I have a solid grasp of reality and I don't think I have any outrageous delusion or any auditory hallucination. I never think these voices are real but they might as well be because they taken a toll on my life. I have imaginary conversations...every single minute of the day. They can be pleasant but sometimes they're accusatory and I am drain of having to explain myself to them even when it is obvious to me. They usually personified themselves as people I know in real life and they're personalities usually are exactly like them.  I feel so immature when I do this and sometimes it lasts 10 minutes on and off screaming and crying then...I am fine and happy. I even start repeating words and sentences over and over again to calm me down not on purpose but more on impulse. Does anyone know what this could be and how to stop it? Also, I wrote this in a rush so I apologize for any grammar mistakes.",4.855153846153846,6.759446203030307,6.094545454545457,73.97412587412589,70.3030303030303,8.955710955710957,32.086247086247084,9.466822959209583,3.270638694638695,1397,64,239,32,26,468,170,330,0.214,0.7040000000000001,0.083,-0.9932,0,2,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,6,1,15,18,4,2,10,0,33,2,0,7,3,61,53,33,0,3,12,0,2,1,0,1,2,4,0,2,18,14,0,7,12,0,0,2,8,12,1,0,3,8,41,6,42,43,3,34,0,0,2,0,15,15,0,6,18,188,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820304629807628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20926679869960432,0.0,0.15694162311805962,0.0,0.0,0.07172393764231509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669568101005685,0.0,0.0,0.17129433817101186,0.06252973795825277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537441525941277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084885416397222,0.11504836937676825,0.08189906139793945,0.0,0.11267556888725028,0.0661534154211309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976546627406562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550174222530334,0.0,0.08642520223923471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037316132582382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071840704944724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907081408979279,0.10919468881360203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274682390756648,0.08361361260239661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14490575993201596,0.05011374115201191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847067119471739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881755329587993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911339083566153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801411994101097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108045233233264,0.0,0.21334107837315894,0.179131845871258,0.0,0.0,0.09696803443694664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23350923548386684,0.06571319099293495,0.10546581993534103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153003863810533,0.0,0.10456391702763264,0.0,0.07896847140044484,0.4058034865808279,0.0,0.07260423926153425,0.0,0.0,0.25727587013870784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814732929954241,0.19718081347870065,0.0,0.08143435555397899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859324028766871,0.2259472467501284,0.0,0.060502331200393014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222867450740578,0.0,0.09255941885533918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31360292961028674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AntzGravy,2020/02/12,"Final opportunity in life After years of mental health problems, suicide attempts, breakdown of my relationship with my partner and infant son, I've finally reached my final attempt at life.

Got a new job today (6th job in <12 months) If this doesn't work out and get my life back on track then that's it. No more years of suffering. No more causing daily annoyance to others. Just one final selfish act. 

Got nothing left to lose.",3.326319444444444,6.227484437500002,4.249166666666672,80.43027777777782,79.625,6.055555555555558,27.63888888888889,7.3871296695380915,1.9225972222222216,345,15,57,5,9,111,63,80,0.222,0.7090000000000001,0.069,-0.9345,2,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,5,2,6,1,0,1,0,1,4,0,1,0,8,4,4,1,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,2,0,4,1,12,2,2,19,0,2,0,0,4,6,0,1,12,33,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339002082942044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148522332297465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6461544683586892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704338294807396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235879422670318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15674637862391033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926687437910879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602190886086027,0.0,0.3124726436210421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649734882571896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860812016950528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770363879606086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424207799806209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414948206575352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992481230348696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110227048155213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832018187480326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130069615093146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977777550887954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735489239854823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18992280206437093
mentalhealth,Mynameisthisorisit,2020/02/12,"One of my closest friends has an inferiority complex. A copy and pasted message ""yeahh i know that i really need to do something but i just get so anxious about bringing it up and it just feels like everyone like has their own problems and it’s never the right time to bring it up like i don’t want to burden anyone"" she sent me 

How do I help her?
What should I say?",0.6406432748538009,2.9769797894736847,2.6085964912280737,91.40073099415207,86.63157894736842,4.956725146198831,21.60233918128655,6.42735559955562,0.33967426900584785,288,10,62,3,9,96,57,76,0.14300000000000002,0.659,0.198,0.5839,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,1,1,15,14,6,0,4,3,0,1,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,3,0,1,1,2,11,4,7,12,1,10,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,0,6,44,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30525094249425544,0.0,0.1889312686526332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581892455238354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662206744698366,0.1930321050567756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20875711620713985,0.0,0.14116920433776328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111046317165835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849575453902816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39602061755154105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200351091778606,0.20839616157904348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830956236175536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579380386005015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585464772173604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730980890009492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307507235481643,0.0,0.21487518861763494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080144227391536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15755674874068765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15937192750259996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kyletom1738,2020/02/12,"ocd is driving me crazy im struggling to cope with my, symptons to occur more often and yesterday  i spent almost an hour locking the house when i went to the shop, i was freaking out when i left the house because i thought i didnt lock up properly

really in need of advice",3.8212499999999987,4.870241482142858,5.041428571428573,83.85357142857143,71.67857142857143,7.742857142857144,30.07142857142857,8.07648339933343,2.0759785714285717,217,9,43,3,4,72,44,56,0.151,0.8490000000000001,0.0,-0.7906,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,7,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,2,2,1,2,0,0,5,0,8,0,8,2,1,10,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,4,28,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564928817386586,0.0,0.0,0.2628362798752053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600056609322126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584903946085469,0.6057344522850159,0.0,0.0,0.28352395421630555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851858034317942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19462594588186768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16815171309064408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744015824529796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20838017731183364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243322029438496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Suwoth,2020/02/12,"Read something that really shook me. It's just a stupid hentai but the concept of it really really shook me to my core, which is odd because hentai, manga ect is something i can never take serious but even though I never did the extremes the character did to fit in, it just really messed me up inside.

The main characters last thing say she was sorry she couldn't be a mama just hits me, my mother is out there somewhere and she left me when i was 7 years old, I remember the night too, I was sleeping and she woke me up and said she was sorry but that she was going, she had washed her hands with orange hand sanitizer and whenever I smell that a massive FLOOD fills me up.

It's silly honestly, but I just wanted that character to have a happy ending, and I don't know why I can't stop thinking about it. It makes me want to go adopt a girl my age when my mom left and just have a happy life, to have a family.

All this over a stupid fucking porn comic. I don't know if it's too healthy to obsess over this and I haven't really thought of her in such a long time, she had me when she was 18 so she would be 38 now, I never tried looking for her either, when i was older atleast, when I was younger when me and my dad would go to super markets i'd always look for her in the crowd.

I just feel so alone and that fucking comic made me realize how sad life is and how lonely and unforgiving it is, even if it isn't real in the books.",4.34993399339934,4.117422161716174,5.656848184818482,84.48778052805281,69.95709570957095,8.845544554455445,25.744224422442244,8.515128840125781,1.4514145214521452,1117,27,247,16,18,377,147,303,0.10400000000000001,0.773,0.12300000000000001,0.8387,0,3,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,25,16,4,3,16,0,31,9,3,4,4,48,51,28,0,7,13,3,3,0,0,2,3,2,0,1,18,13,0,1,7,4,0,6,9,11,0,0,16,8,45,5,23,29,3,39,0,2,2,3,21,13,2,2,20,180,63,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220796824352402,0.0,0.0,0.09818188181576087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192908863516287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450917464769964,0.0,0.0,0.15587010508903754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123585251662356,0.0,0.059662175533997226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21817026208955348,0.0,0.0,0.20117904086274754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512172513950537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12969471094849055,0.09618225101149952,0.0,0.0,0.25640536482301324,0.0,0.16668771676053334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044224888126664,0.1981733541303678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116503922911256,0.07876305159893779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819514756011894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730166935344817,0.0,0.0,0.11073097907118752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12381664693585705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802763969984252,0.1343049486906686,0.3779553612223614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336661357119847,0.0,0.1122409394198384,0.09383492330900996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808092347482298,0.0,0.0,0.18167772212761207,0.0,0.2641730701730205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864969570825552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871808795871616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783911055681863,0.07560688547547363,0.115930184391709,0.09367541220947084,0.06880424645587033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011134055195795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391938519381779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647277375941992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16764153154943262,0.0,0.0,0.07598536755892714
mentalhealth,SealandsServant,2020/02/12,"I keep overthinking the fact that there is no happiness without suffering. I force myself to suffer and I do not know how to react to suffering. If I react to it positively, its purpose is defeated. When I am happy and I remember that it is only temporary and do mot enjoy it anymore. I imagine ways of torture for myself to suffer. The guidance counsellor says I am given problems because I can deal with it. How do you stop overthinking this fact and move on?",4.445032467532466,6.3004972045454535,6.3424025974026,71.9818181818182,71.27272727272727,9.574025974025977,33.02597402597402,9.957137785484203,3.849215584415584,366,18,60,10,7,127,56,88,0.19899999999999998,0.622,0.179,-0.2714,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,4,10,1,0,2,0,9,0,0,4,2,20,12,8,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,5,0,2,3,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,1,1,12,3,10,11,0,5,0,5,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,52,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574368966102014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823957961103238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26761899975738346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5526625320310137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23072957772686795,0.0,0.0,0.14266020137109606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758959831314931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19742480851962266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483861752015413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940572934349089,0.0,0.0,0.20643107119798107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21702327492023105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060451530364981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25022905264856554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Previous-Jellyfish,2020/02/12,"I always want to catch a cold or flu, Idk why I am hindered severely by my anxiety disorders, depression and trauma. I have been informed my mental disorders qualify me as a person with disability by my doctor but I still feel guilt and shame everyday that may be internalized ableism. I have fears that the government will one day randomly decide I'm not disabled after all and I will be taken off government financial support and become homeless. I can't see a happy future with these problems. I would like to do serious work on my disorders but there aren't a lot of options. I've been waiting to stat sessions with a therapist on a waiting list for several months. During this time I've attempted suicide three times. I'm dying inside. 

Anyway, all that aside, I wish almost everyday that I had a physical illness like a cold or the flu or something. I would even be fine with something terminal. Whatever illness can elevate the guilt I feel about being housebound and unemployed.",5.210567765567763,7.4446484450549475,6.323318681318683,71.33834798534798,70.04395604395604,10.128058608058607,34.660805860805866,10.355215969177356,4.381275750915751,795,41,125,24,15,265,116,182,0.248,0.667,0.085,-0.9842,2,0,2,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,2,5,13,0,4,11,0,19,5,0,0,2,33,30,11,2,5,6,0,2,2,0,5,5,0,0,1,6,9,0,2,4,0,0,1,3,8,0,2,4,5,17,5,17,17,3,13,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,8,11,90,23,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14621248276750093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214958048257538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170073315371787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16126160167293316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09416730700693862,0.0,0.12576212028061448,0.0,0.15154005297451284,0.0,0.5020359824946994,0.14945208185163328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644123496025436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643069662460436,0.1476586901799386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543520647541806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14267066993552022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241363511730819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714832612915768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11654742290257042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894323979374052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12749427537108102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971620723484973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635469393155792,0.0,0.0,0.32990976631490465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22481827258336945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660741039842612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971622152951456,0.16569558404970086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16953414975175934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028451979097367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612316628723947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175542269810664,0.0,0.16790952956351812,0.0,0.0,0.10630033338826797,0.0,0.0,0.2074490977473884,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dogepoli,2020/02/12,"Has anyone ever had this symptom? Despair/echoing of movements Hey. I've experienced this a few times. I think it might have something to do with concentration or stress. It manifests a little differently. The last time it happened I imagined an object that was infinitely big and it really hurt my head to think about it.

The other times was on a math test and while I was lying in bed and staring at the ceiling (quite literally)

It triggered the symptom, which feels like my every move is echoing. It also feels as if each movement I make is extremely short, and it feels as if I can't speak (I imagine in my head that I can't speak and that only garbled sounds come out if I try) even though I can.

The things that help with the symptom are a change of environment, putting on music (or specifically changing the sounds in the room NOT to be static) or speaking with someone else - sort of to prove to myself that I can talk.

It's so weird because I can't find this described anywhere.",5.224687877567458,6.289712717277492,5.708586387434558,80.30345952476844,68.42408376963351,7.971163914619412,31.44623439387837,8.139509932561175,2.250925573902537,783,32,147,10,13,252,116,191,0.067,0.905,0.028999999999999998,-0.7866,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,1,13,0,17,5,2,2,2,32,25,17,0,3,7,0,3,1,0,1,3,5,2,0,20,11,0,0,9,0,0,5,4,3,0,1,4,10,15,1,21,19,2,23,0,1,1,0,6,11,0,8,8,107,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541490315630318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091386804579933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08797784857721948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053488038741585,0.12432132606136975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15078662431675066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205631929829548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532385828488664,0.1305482489665691,0.12159819638034225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189218553097942,0.1031042480009877,0.0,0.0,0.1319084384454177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276241888294326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962336910138205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673654082015083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15450055860465345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764235688048433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050883746951292,0.14464937577338755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633659981705373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531036997596262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15339231238271894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976400437880686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14508429148399268,0.0,0.15350507898940433,0.0,0.0,0.09245689100060124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222842529559864,0.11110675409964492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16532129717172875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4500199955700643,0.0,0.11600121198985915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588166548946438,0.1849524649337671,0.14179643314647722,0.0,0.2524673824327488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798571790818936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AGirlwithPurpleHair,2020/02/12,"I think my job is having a negative impact... I like my job, I do. It's my first ""real"" job post-grad. However, it's not in a field I studied, nor really had any interest in. I'm not very busy in the position I'm in, so my days are often filled with me reading the news or being on social media until a task comes across my desk. I'm not fulfilled in any way, and there really isn't any room for advancement. I looked at this job from the beginning as a stepping stone, and I potentially have other opportunities coming up. But I've realized that because I'm so bored and unfulfilled in this position, that it's seriously affecting my mental health and depression because it causes me to feel and believe that I'm useless and that all my schooling amounted to nothing, and ... it can get bad. I just don't know what to do right now, other than continue to look for other jobs. I also know that I need to become more social because not having any friends doesn't help either, but it's quite difficult where I live. I've been scouring social media and event sites trying to find stuff I'd be interested in, groups or classes that seem exciting to meet potential friends, but there isn't much for my age range or interests...

I'm at a loss, and that is what is having the most negative impact.",7.898411154345005,6.0625471906614825,8.648881322957198,71.19980706874189,63.47470817120622,12.146433203631648,35.813553826199744,11.038039088145766,3.811002853437096,1016,37,196,23,12,346,140,257,0.135,0.812,0.053,-0.9490000000000001,6,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,5,9,15,0,0,9,0,19,1,0,2,1,39,37,21,0,1,12,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,21,12,0,0,7,1,0,5,11,7,0,1,2,4,20,8,27,33,6,30,0,3,2,0,8,16,0,6,9,133,41,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945906223614589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042903963326761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340329374182373,0.20457711134444256,0.12354701817502353,0.0,0.1260344807079725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149170202172328,0.0,0.1927250110905088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07214420463139913,0.0,0.09634987373839572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656272382919966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224334017228677,0.09515301615070704,0.0,0.0,0.17285452243630628,0.0,0.05844527803858125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189081440827903,0.0,0.0,0.07498130647841487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5550478655513156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295706705008015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05465199299990895,0.0,0.09877957560159058,0.0,0.18787824278373555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127344435011568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223425502764999,0.0829470940157561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10733827900473276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713654065369813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189830779156846,0.1118961004824626,0.1273278028112858,0.14332822781096152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955328058880943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321419016822913,0.0,0.1018384484251612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34209937215241104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280596093959345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167910563868479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594955414666847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230102363783213,0.0,0.08879388734125858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,advicepormoi,2020/02/12,"Advice regarding a returning colleague after long term sickness for mental health I have a direct report returning to work after 3 months for a serious mental health episode and i would really appreciate your advice on how to handle things when they are back in the office. Im working with HR who are managing the technical side of things and giving advice but is there anyone here who has been in the same position or have you been the person returning? What did you really appreciate when you returned? I don’t want to be over the top in any way nor seem unsupportive so any advice is gratefully received.   

Thank you!",6.435526315789473,8.014871105263158,7.046447368421056,69.92388157894739,66.01754385964911,10.612280701754386,30.03947368421053,10.686352973137794,3.6370736842105273,502,18,80,14,8,165,78,114,0.01,0.825,0.165,0.9534,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,5,1,3,7,2,0,0,8,0,13,3,0,1,0,10,17,9,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,9,1,14,12,2,21,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,2,12,62,14,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6200006999676452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157320560202093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090975226069992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196784545820825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15216133101748666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372081236830409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17133521296978133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403723924537489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31970030699502616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266077836615218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13849956723417445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20323016200344868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14440033681936387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603461557859967,0.0,0.0,0.2107581836215713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355730855289124,0.12590399242974418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23095233300903226,0.0,0.0,0.11267804055322438,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Foreign-Flatworm,2020/02/12,"I'm afraid my dad is depressed. How can I help him? I live in the US, specifically the east coast.

I'm sorry if this isnt the best place to post this, but I don't know any other subs like this

My (18) Dad (38) just had a very bad breakup with his girlfriend. She left with most if not all of his savings and his cat. I don't live with him, but he asked me to, which I'm uncomfortable with, as I'm very close to finishing HS. I don't know how to approach asking him to consider therapy, but I'm very afraid he will possibly hurt himself. He's really afraid of being alone, he texted me saying he ""thinks crazy thoughts"".

I've already offered to let my cat live over there, since he doesn't get as much attention as he needs to here anyways. I don't know how to broach the idea for therapy, and I don't think he'd agree with it either. 

How can I help him through this?",3.3616306306306285,3.606399572972976,4.391148648648649,91.03897522522524,72.18918918918921,8.112612612612612,25.68693693693693,8.07648339933343,1.1126126126126126,671,19,162,9,12,219,103,185,0.14800000000000002,0.8059999999999999,0.047,-0.9562,0,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,0,1,8,9,0,3,5,0,15,0,0,4,1,32,30,14,0,3,8,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,0,8,0,0,1,8,6,0,0,2,1,24,3,22,24,5,9,0,2,0,0,27,6,0,3,2,93,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963360156710442,0.159432898311656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824865875061108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701311815921391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063145526276454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15161868628224034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443699807388996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548276576325894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936784829664816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546645846250377,0.16309585892100514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23820075297490595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697363580720494,0.14773653532518202,0.0,0.07058369340606417,0.0,0.3827249600424685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062065100600706,0.10712715001888153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15094670742672273,0.0,0.0,0.16287502262729606,0.13836810558948065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255504815954547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148931426428836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951206992445172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16172909383559442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33044187667484604,0.0,0.0,0.18514882031951668,0.0,0.11469783442643075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17378688240084034,0.0,0.0,0.35762358127705296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon-ymouss,2020/02/12,"Almost positive I have severe ADHD, and just live life through it like it doesn’t matter.. advice? Some context: I have the attention span of a fish. Horrible short term memory. I tune out very quickly and noticed this throughout my childhood. I probably read 2 books in full in my whole life. During school, I had good grades. I finished college with a 3.6. I put myself through hell to get there. Now I have a good job, and I’m going through hell x10 because it is demanding and my brain can’t keep up without 2-3 coffees a day (I’m not addicted to caffeine, but I literally need it to be remotely sharp at work).

Back track to college, I tried Vyvanse one time during finals week. My brain never felt so sharp in my life. I never felt so in control of my own thoughts. It was so satisfying to be able to READ without thinking of some f***** activity I did 2 years ago. Or about a meal I haven’t had in a while. Or about some random current event. These thoughts happen when I speak to people, read, or pretty much do anything.. but that one time when I took Vyvanse, my mind was absolutely focused. I felt like a different, untainted version of myself with focus and no cloudiness holding me back.

What do I do? Get a prescription to something that isn’t necessarily good for me or natural?..",1.9859675583380785,4.535155438247017,3.561051508252703,85.49800298804783,82.26693227091633,6.294877632327832,26.89257256687535,7.5804360353943165,1.7583305634604427,1009,45,192,17,28,333,145,251,0.055999999999999994,0.826,0.11800000000000001,0.9525,3,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,0,2,13,7,2,0,9,0,18,7,2,1,2,38,33,17,0,1,10,0,5,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,10,8,1,3,7,4,0,3,10,2,0,2,11,6,28,5,30,20,9,35,2,0,0,0,1,11,2,9,23,131,38,10,0.1118081817347394,0.0,0.0,0.12188742159833603,0.1343717068225419,0.10925766117192053,0.09911120698819134,0.0,0.11195974334895176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200860689320016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17194718049366714,0.0,0.06815722981947386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24962981600351256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540238305817486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210702755881393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168157527543878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32206016498896745,0.12248039794965986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683032048776193,0.0,0.06354316630041161,0.281338194407541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988716058558394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095236808626628,0.0993802492014703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369202759600343,0.10924765989237614,0.0,0.09872867289262262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11289439062228583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219187838930772,0.0829043500399827,0.17246672501919147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272943559646397,0.0,0.0,0.1515282351238925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775137152518893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374911659113815,0.12054813051713713,0.0,0.0,0.11239810427042553,0.0,0.0,0.3355153158498241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315584906949412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12631142042661278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607540075293578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164216823911419,0.0,0.17752641440458014,0.13039249981421247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124223003863827,0.07591041611608443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922534594312128,0.0,0.0,0.08968577922205095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482984200647455,0.0,0.2155581946160384,0.0,0.08139768793190783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07200080326193976
mentalhealth,dunta90,2020/02/12,"Dementors without a patronus - perfect analogy to describe depression I’m 29, I love Harry Potter. I grew up with him. I’ve also grown up with depression. Well since a 2012 diagnosis and subsequent periods of major depressive episodes (like right now). This one has just made me resign from a high-paid but stressful job today. It’s not an out to say a dementor forced me to do it, it’s actually a phenomenally accurate analogy. 

I never stopped to truly appreciate how great this analogy for depression is, until just now. JK Rowling introduces Dementors in the third book, the ghost like guards of Askaban which feed on your fear and command inescapable despair like Medusa’s eyes will turn you to stone. It’s utterly perfect to describe how depression descends and envelopes you. 

You cannot control them. You can’t control it. They can decent on you at any time and feed directly off your fear, growing ever more powerful as they do. You have to conjure something borderline superhuman in order to banish them upon arrival. It takes huge energy, laser focus and strong belief to banish a dementor. Just like a patronus. Without your patronus, all is lost. Sometimes tragically forever. 

It’s such a wonderful analogy. If you ever want to explain what depression feels like to someone who doesn’t suffer from it. I’m referring to depression importantly, not sadness. Describe it in terms of a gang of dementors and you can’t conjure your patronus, or even conceive of one.",5.105589353612167,7.946652228136884,6.100632699619776,70.06138250950573,72.34600760456273,9.683285171102662,35.995285171102665,9.98439552973466,4.623601794676807,1188,67,178,36,25,392,155,263,0.239,0.5820000000000001,0.179,-0.9759,2,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,12,4,7,13,27,0,3,12,0,12,4,1,5,6,38,23,14,1,2,10,0,1,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,14,9,2,4,5,1,0,3,9,16,1,3,2,3,22,11,37,20,4,28,1,13,1,1,21,13,0,3,16,127,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.10713026274509788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779169725075353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746547350357655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462570914877501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6618785301082978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250920876298864,0.19860610781551585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470679294320036,0.05550849072152108,0.07842745328574131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103376250990047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598948374380133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894054320294297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26816686334879125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983875396665555,0.0,0.0990814932883192,0.10387728421023792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466975077726607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878067525467645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375223663650058,0.0,0.08730212941840834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081184442866837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301694859551783,0.08451465323520689,0.10857605681671903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917816970281658,0.12575358011388346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825415285012747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640140900296307,0.0,0.10405939899414736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194100284231422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475158313997767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987061583705957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21164962243130034,0.11905263691121575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kelbaez,2020/02/12,"Desperate and Tired- Need Advice! (18F) I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder and ADHD. I took stimulants (adderall, ritalin, Vyvanse) to combat the ""ADHD"" but none of them helped. They all made me feel emotionally good, jittery but never focused. I realized that the diagnosis was wrong. I took what was prescribed and occasionally took more because of my cognitive issues (easily distracted, forgetful, emotionally unstable).  Now my brain is complete shit to the point where I can't read a sentence without getting confused or rereading it 10 times. 

I took Prozac and it made my depression significantly worse. It made me sleepy almost all day. I'm taking Zoloft now but they're also making me extremely tired. The anxiety is minimized but my depression seems worse on antidepressants. 

My mood swings are intense. I go from having suicidal thoughts to happiness in minutes or hours. It fluctuates constantly throughout a day, but my baseline is depressed. I have a lot of internal anger at the world and myself. I think people are not genuine and do things because it's the right thing to do. I never believe what anyone tells me. 

I feel jealous and sadness at everyone doing significantly better than me. I also feel jealous of people having better childhoods than me, or having supportive homes, or just being normal. Sometimes, when I get a pinch of validation I think I'm the shit and feel better than everyone else. When I get slight criticism I shut down completely and have a hard time letting go of what caused me to feel this way. 

My thinking can be black and white because of my mood swings. I have a boyfriend, and he does everything he can to show me his affection and love, but sometimes I don't believe him at all.

 I have these weird thoughts that he doesn't love me. He's embarrassed by me and only loves me because I was the first girl to reciprocate feelings for him. I avoid him most of the time and act passive. I hate that I act this way because I really am in love with him. Sometimes showing affection and expressing that vulnerability is difficult for me. Sometimes I am extremely in love with him. Other times I question everything about us.

I isolate myself socially and avoid people all the time. I never speak to anyone in class because I feel weird. My thoughts, actions, and behaviors don't feel like me. Sometimes they feel foreign to me, like my body is on autopilot and I do things automatically without being aware of it. 

I act differently with different people because of my fluctuating self-esteem/idenity. I catch myself mirroring other people's traits because I don't know what normal is. I understand it's not normal. I always feel like people can see through me. This is amplified when I become mute. My thoughts sometimes feel blocked. This makes me anxious, which is when I become extremely timid. I rarely say a word when I get like this. I feel awkward and my social anxiety amplifies. 

Nothing is spontaneous. I have to think about everything hard before I do, think or behave a certain way, and even when I do, it feels ""not me."". I have a hard time making eye contact. Before it was never a problem because I wasn't aware of it. Now I just stay in my dorm most of the time and never socialize.

 I feel high all the time, but the kind of high where you feel high but don't feel any pleasure. Everything is just hazy all the time, 24/7. I forget everything easily. I have absolutely no friends. I feel empty and lonely being in college. I feel stupid. I know this isn't me, but is it? 

This is more of a rant. I did seek out medical advice. I'm just waiting for the appointment. Has anyone experienced this? I don't wanna flunk ANOTHER semester of college (first year) and be lonely. This feels different than anxiety and depression. Any advice/tips/experiences with types of therapies/medications? Thank you for anyone that read this.",4.420028589447128,7.063182814084513,5.312131595543409,75.85170590708431,73.67605633802816,8.633172167332352,30.4561698549506,9.292989375938378,3.2356377969308387,3098,141,513,78,67,1009,287,710,0.221,0.6729999999999999,0.106,-0.9979,3,6,0,0,0,0,104.0,1,2,3,5,20,50,7,7,26,0,57,17,5,10,12,127,120,46,1,6,23,0,22,4,1,0,7,2,2,1,37,30,0,4,34,4,0,11,21,28,0,2,18,29,101,20,60,96,13,68,0,9,4,5,33,22,2,12,35,360,138,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465823707430133,0.08509763309188152,0.0,0.0,0.04360110338431312,0.0,0.0,0.0696411711372037,0.036230498564145015,0.0,0.0,0.05922021491370263,0.045657667284137816,0.09992871584192854,0.04919015653220276,0.0,0.12178253869306988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388856299032935,0.09617761265489326,0.07410220594664096,0.09811402691661676,0.0,0.1155282937987898,0.0,0.048365434915040736,0.0,0.0486073614042369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0447297102802192,0.0,0.0,0.09130608471503099,0.047053519769884034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056162078784486535,0.0,0.1875136480961357,0.04419429454985832,0.0,0.13647661812386894,0.049902995879870266,0.0,0.03810396754964749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03637382056285653,0.09795795857848533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028759133122028675,0.0,0.0,0.08321264660788265,0.19566406904487216,0.04259250921703185,0.0,0.0,0.4183074939673233,0.06221294116831165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407374184719584,0.0,0.0,0.03364050292370088,0.0,0.09099575846887713,0.0,0.04949193487512202,0.03652103078421365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04635135372041664,0.11701545317599482,0.04298878936140997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029185338332579518,0.13801379413669965,0.043676256348773236,0.0,0.04288017782221834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04544661883317136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04534237578513831,0.047859176783900136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044524726768896884,0.0,0.08508984338443229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03701791925560539,0.19649213555221215,0.12360170642829835,0.08719402933887066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048365434915040736,0.043864064645016805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032285900529767625,0.1679116815335678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798598034353356,0.0417798000051088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03311571384891725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111957448131166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041161339554095414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04166388998261944,0.0,0.0,0.04877709456656918,0.0,0.08710772602014077,0.0,0.027894171345734974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03718469832887365,0.0,0.03462640959146905,0.0,0.0,0.034697400272089486,0.03963907421923747,0.04542388551554837,0.0,0.08939063861168874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13315700123877353,0.0,0.0,0.2583853823640815,0.0,0.0,0.0464100637205101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0476279682503831,0.0494110362790513,0.0,0.0,0.032738225209755285,0.0,0.038057697031712384,0.0400876971134715,0.0,0.0,0.08678226935167561,0.13950003325455185,0.0,0.1382701909877678,0.2285076325379305,0.10009043110386764,0.0,0.0,0.19350741158080226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04532884077488972,0.05237576093066064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368502893446913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394602245109356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874619865402973,0.0,0.047606429025755265,0.0,0.0280396718755681
mentalhealth,hazilchanel,2020/02/12,"self stimulatory ticks?? Hi, F23, Ive been diagnosed with anxiety,depression,bipolar, adhd, and i was told i might be on the spectrum for autism.... and i have a self stimulatory tick that never stops, i like to feel the hairs on my eyebrows and feel the texture of the hairs on my finger tips and under the nail and it feels really good. i do it almost constantly  i havent been able to stop since i was 8 and ive had bald eyebrows before because of it. anyone know wtf this is????? its terrible and my bf/mom want me to stop and i literally cant even though i want to",0.5377709359605909,2.8805121120689665,3.1034975369458166,87.56982758620691,87.36206896551724,6.4177339901477835,20.354679802955662,7.7094869923839395,0.9271817733990152,439,14,94,9,14,152,73,116,0.13,0.805,0.065,-0.8455,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,6,0,14,5,4,0,1,21,21,9,0,2,0,0,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,6,9,0,3,4,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,6,15,2,12,13,0,9,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,6,62,21,0,0.18470593825780152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22198064398223152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18495631644768545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291506866568302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259502558341886,0.0,0.15717114922221825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19960150126997056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874726393022126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199653021608604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28017861652686976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549225776967592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150955318889353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023799157544522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959438116541405,0.0,0.21632536252418624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424566063443204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832735371380315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3853771529424131,0.0,0.0,0.15279066082535353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4632673049038568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814726465350186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649443940441947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178886959005923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HoldOrFold23,2020/02/12,"One day at a time Depression has a voice. It says I'm not good enough. It says no one wants me. It says I'm not attractive. It tells me to go back to bed. It says do your chores later. It says everyone who tells me they love me are lying. It says my decade long relationship is a joke and my SO is just waiting for me to pour my heart out with love before the curtains are drawn back and everyone around me tells me how pathetic I am for ever thinking it was real. It tells me I'm a wasted space. It says I'll never amount to anything.



Eventually I get on top though.



I'll feel peace and contentment. Then the universe or God or karma throws all these things at me. People that hurt me, friends that never were, accidents that I can't escape. Lessons? Depression sucks me back into the hole and starts whispering in my ear again. It's a cycle. 



An endless fucking cycle.



And all I can do is take it one damn day at a time.",1.0259947643979077,3.173581167539272,2.7146047120418864,92.60981282722513,82.87434554973822,6.12366492146597,20.02120418848168,7.365786028017652,0.4721264921465971,717,20,159,11,20,236,110,191,0.163,0.7170000000000001,0.12,-0.8507,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,1,2,10,12,3,0,10,0,13,5,2,1,5,26,28,11,0,1,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,10,3,0,18,9,0,1,3,1,0,2,6,6,0,3,2,11,21,6,15,26,4,27,1,3,0,3,18,10,3,2,15,105,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950746000276788,0.09682729806373276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25090949477949953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925542430850754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14029376387864873,0.0,0.1873648272242371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238725279422014,0.0,0.0,0.09838761256280126,0.0,0.20786651148939408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054996776676454286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403451004809226,0.10055500888285153,0.0568272121015112,0.0,0.061815819281833474,0.09123011434649077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12889155934081928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643925691124116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625697095067023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19633618887189852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16777841783195732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22111367462152345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540659512025688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380271425862445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11677699253436262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.605481243826923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698712103300556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178060600299812,0.0,0.3802749240547735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226116191316583,0.06969465927918525,0.10686480008456747,0.0,0.1268479314693774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06415466014491253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-BoB-,2020/02/12,"My inner dialogue is speaking very slow today, and it seems that my inner voices are insulting me..? I feel weird today because my inner dialogue sounds very slow. As I read this sentence in my head, the inner voice is speaking it slowly, it always speaks of fast or normal pace, and I’m wondering what is the cause of this? My inner voice is also somewhat insulting me or talking to me in a condescending way, as if it’s angry at me. I don’t think it’s a auditory hallucination because the voice isn’t that clear enough but it feels that someone else’s voice is trying to insult me. 

I’m having a shitty day and I’m really depressed. Is this why? Is there a reason for this?",3.9157777777777767,5.222068466666666,5.757962962962968,77.82583333333336,71.74074074074073,8.066666666666668,26.092592592592588,8.548686976883017,1.90745925925926,533,17,99,9,10,184,74,135,0.16699999999999998,0.8109999999999999,0.022000000000000002,-0.9679,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,3,0,7,0,11,1,1,2,1,17,19,10,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,9,0,0,14,3,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,11,13,0,10,19,2,15,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,6,6,66,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16221905030778838,0.16878742770348207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473109217964896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20838280010840804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308214513765343,0.0,0.17471438470772016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16945512349720704,0.0,0.0,0.2095982475668533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20513408285398066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20818259475708084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987499046422358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029048673179112,0.0,0.12995088712431271,0.20856355710018865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846669971203139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718741240483736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16304312466530624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299780721256087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845561120026056,0.0,0.0,0.13772181640413433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3347449441721518,0.0,0.16101286686432273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18304054954895368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21998214297206334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sirephrae,2020/02/12,"I need support that doesnt exist Back in November I got to a point in my life where my mental illnesses consumed me. I ended up attempting suicide, which led to the worst 3 days in ICU. I talked my way out a 72 hold and went to an intensive outpatient program for a month. It was rough and it put a big toll on me and my family. It ruined me financially to the point I thought about doing it again. 
I'm on some meds that work and doing better, but getting my life together after this has been hard and I still struggle. I try to talk about what happened because everyone in my life is trying to move on, but I can't move on. I wanted to kill myself, and still struggle with suicidal thoughts. My therapist helps, but sue doesnt understand or get personal about anything. 

I tried to look up a support group for people who survived a suicide attempt. I have done really well in groups before and feel like if I had a group where we could talk about it and help eachother. All I can find though is support for families of people who attempted or had successful suicides. I tried a generic mental health support group but they got uncomfortable because of how open I was. 

Do you think starting a support group in my area could be helpful? Is this something you would he willing to go to if it existed? I dont know where to start but I feel like I need this and others might as well. 
I'm willing to run a group, I just dont know if this is to specific.

Also if you know any groups like this please let me know!",4.220127298444133,5.163454765676568,5.147373880245169,83.85732673267329,70.65016501650166,8.41169259783121,29.61008958038661,8.704169506293173,2.19362876001886,1186,46,240,20,21,388,160,303,0.11699999999999999,0.7090000000000001,0.174,0.9579,0,0,1,0,0,4,24.0,1,3,1,7,17,17,1,2,13,0,29,5,0,2,1,48,59,24,5,10,12,0,4,3,0,4,5,0,0,1,18,13,0,1,11,0,0,7,5,5,2,0,11,5,37,12,38,40,3,39,0,1,1,0,22,21,0,8,13,171,55,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06355207356496421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054042276907058616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539698034718079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061107470068262386,0.0,0.0968882622947708,0.0,0.06762305640106084,0.0,0.0,0.07028469420644395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269005436695871,0.0,0.0,0.05125152986645078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132532880786147,0.186276330015966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038676923070543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593692283463617,0.0,0.0,0.14983435296779854,0.0,0.08036476788319437,0.11354666641179315,0.0,0.0,0.07263407545011588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303951587661366,0.0,0.045164592075274325,0.0,0.12711872398567886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027499582244402,0.0,0.07118944696116866,0.0,0.0,0.08447281841916636,0.0,0.0,0.15980105490267368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792170206553812,0.0,0.1746983787930122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812633867257071,0.16839588331982536,0.11647497948616188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673472540506803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882731759828236,0.0,0.16017399394996126,0.08430503621369256,0.0,0.0,0.06343213919570649,0.16892791579341435,0.0,0.11785189089003005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018888523872228,0.0693900767651876,0.0,0.08723411774619927,0.1502495398430704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988922845626335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091047150557862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061179833946942035,0.0,0.0,0.11249844964935443,0.0,0.12692957602034985,0.0,0.0,0.1661584492692912,0.0,0.34770881564122585,0.4509076687324463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19162475615529528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227071279361747,0.0,0.05092112169246448,0.07807880181964444,0.12618049360749325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158194611794203,0.0,0.0,0.08273099881863967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04687342315989269,0.06307953067443116,0.0,0.0,0.14290602037607292,0.07366942042232072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057855054844682535,0.0,0.0,0.05645315750712256,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LonnieBird,2020/02/12,How do you tell the difference between imposter syndrome and actually sucking and something and not being suited to your position? im having trouble distinguishing,7.902564102564102,11.993719000000002,8.213076923076922,51.61525641025645,70.53846153846153,9.620512820512822,47.12820512820512,9.725611199111238,6.904451282051282,138,10,13,4,3,45,24,26,0.10099999999999999,0.899,0.0,-0.4019,0,0,1,0,0,0,1.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,6,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,13,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.4566226902586294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4888770958029534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5054341927102524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602278883452213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4089829449230372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,j-saves,2020/02/12,"I had a near death experience, this what I learned. I felt it’s time to finally share my experience. Hope it helps people who are struggling. Hello, this my message the world fix everybody. Anybody that is struggling or finding to cope. Being in a dark place where walls in are caving in inside your mind. The feeling so strong. You become to think that will the pain ever stop. I bet I am not the only one felt this powerful emotion before. You probably think it’s better off if you just disappear. You think of proper day to do it. The right time and right moment. Just like that  your gone. Your existence fading away in the abyss. Once your gone the people around you will be hurt and filled with lifetime regret. What about you? Well you, your energy and your being will be stuck in a window. Unable to fully pass on. Reliving that finally moment for rest of existence. 

I am writing this because I want people to really understand pain. I think all of worlds problems can be fixed with an easy solution. I want to bring amazing future to our planet. I am tired of people suffering in silence you don’t have to be. We need to be there for each other. We need to stand up and think for people and less of ourselves The planet can only handle us for so long. We gonna stop tearing ourselves little by little. Stop being the recipe for are own self destruction. The rule of our existence is based on energy. You were once non physical form aka soul/spirit into a physical form. The chance of you becoming you is so high it can not be explained. There will be only one version of you. We gonna make it count. 

The environment we are in right now isn’t looking good for the human race. Governments and people in power don’t have a best interest for us. They are trying to mould us to be In a system that isn’t able to support human life. 

All my millennial friends. Who don’t think they will ever amount to anything. All our answers to our problems are always right in front them. Each of us as powerful gift. What gift isn’t thou. We have the power influence and it comes to us so easy. The people that fought for our future. Are standing above us will die for the blessing we have today. We have the ability to change perspective. Global Consciousness is a real thing. We have the ability to shape a our planet in ways we have never seen before. 

My rule of life. We need respect and love each other ❤️🙏❤️. Please do it. We have more control than you think. All the sadness we face can be fixed my Nurturing the human heart. The connection of emotion is around us from life till death. I believe we are already in a world war. What war is it do you ask? It’s the war on Consciousness. How can we fixed it. Well it’s easier than your think. It’s all about connection. The funny thing is that everyone expects to be human but being a human is the hardest thing to do ever. We aren’t perfect but we strive to be. Isn’t that good enough? We gonna stop shattering our connection with ourselves. 

I believe in life we have 
Personas. You start from a baby to adult. We have titles along the way. We are gonna learn how to mentor people and be the reason for someone to change their perspective. Even if it hurts them. The greatest lessons In life are learned through pain. Rmb that 🙏 . Sorry to break your hearts. Pain is part of the human condition. It’s in your being, we are all Survivors. We gonna start acting like it. When we will bring life to this world. If you are caregiver or a parent. You to have ask yourself this question. ARE YOU READY TO PASS ON WISDOM. If you think you are and confident life will fill in the blanks for you. If aren’t ready think about this. With your loved one standing right in front of you. You are not only loving a child you are loving a father,brother,grandparent,mother and sister. We want the best for everybody. We gonna look for the big picture. The reason to bring life into this world. Is too make sure love spreads. All of us life’s problems can fixed by repairing a lost connection. That simple. The reason we fill our cup half empty is to keep a opened mind. Rmb that. Fixed your world the whole world will fix itself. Rule of life, the ripple effect.

I want people stand up for what they believe in. People of power want to separate us but we are humanity we can not broken. We are special. It’s never too late to inspire the people around you. You don’t have to have super powers to be a superhero. 

I want my message to all share across all platforms. We can all be a superhero. The time we are in its our shining moment. God bless.  Loved a caring human ❤️",1.520333659650838,4.0828471828193855,2.815761135584925,89.84949910262688,84.88105726872246,5.653711861641376,20.081416217980088,7.093109894594671,0.5996502365801928,3614,106,709,52,108,1164,319,908,0.083,0.7509999999999999,0.166,0.9976,10,0,0,0,0,0,109.0,50,38,6,16,27,54,5,2,57,0,98,24,3,10,17,151,156,30,6,20,16,2,3,2,1,15,15,0,1,11,50,58,0,6,29,0,1,15,16,20,2,4,10,7,114,34,117,112,27,109,2,6,4,6,128,57,0,10,31,513,164,5,0.042722040402446836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04714483393493288,0.0,0.035548160006136684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03515659909745966,0.1140950206701749,0.07987868144950815,0.0,0.04013876328167113,0.0,0.0,0.02604295929768885,0.09436627424851067,0.07270661951104862,0.14439932926274646,0.08966829132386561,0.03778417296617607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04355796746503094,0.0,0.09038850801077424,0.0368012549387268,0.0,0.0,0.04791640104017426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02755218175335776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04433873299742544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961130904466393,0.0,0.044143288056985065,0.0,0.028217504764656995,0.11593359428095583,0.0,0.04082274041735815,0.0,0.08358070646084301,0.0,0.0,0.02160154728116331,0.0,0.08203971699387927,0.09359981404808647,0.03904717095281667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03300694243832712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716664411121888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012516471510082,0.028635683139798213,0.0451381812879669,0.0,0.042432625766642515,0.0,0.0,0.09146965569815137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03797331246887882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04819232241505887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017584057708413,0.04174366193404176,0.08563741593194321,0.0,0.0378076613719559,0.0717515082344677,0.0,0.0466361537897615,0.0,0.2313498566581716,0.0,0.05703458742142752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627416424349832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503355488821796,0.06589974257723097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099515746408304,0.08684868069538175,0.12996814741972645,0.1818370524640552,0.0,0.047437770054301776,0.046263806523404775,0.0,0.3257989196936082,0.0,0.04463543929777178,0.04689597117393401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04606158531949736,0.12263766878267207,0.0,0.0,0.04785846264900217,0.0,0.0,0.0486270350229268,0.02736883304217317,0.13177611863848987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18242194537213333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04456840547055423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036198246194731984,0.0,0.0,0.047823826525574986,0.060477760171974135,0.0,0.0,0.14287015497113126,0.0,0.08932470515617448,0.0,0.0,0.04848046516961282,0.040265017484725794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851478759296454,0.2737455844950347,0.0,0.0,0.07473469596064454,0.04910270077658604,0.04049549894445256,0.0,0.0,0.029005461084877632,0.0,0.0,0.04447515073262414,0.4625041894024516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119139791557376,0.0678215342483313,0.0,0.0,0.0768244900651836,0.0,0.0,0.047697632417312376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway56765432,2020/02/12,"I'm just a mess This is a bit of a rant post but I don't know where else to say this so I understand if you don't want to sit through my ramblings.

I feel like my mental health is beyond help. Not only do I have depression, anxiety, and possibly OCD but everything in my life is being ruined by well, me.

I only have to friends, the rest I've pushed away by being to weird, awkward, or distant. Oftentimes I'll say something over text and if I don't get a response right away I'll stay up all night worrying that I've said something offensive or stupid. Then I realize it was nothing when the person I'm texting responds normally. I'm always doubting myself and afraid of joking around for fear of making a mistake. I overthink every single little word I say and it's killing me. I'm always afraid I'll lose the only two friends I have because I'm a boring unemployed loser who stays at home all day and they have lives, jobs, and are dating. I've never been on a date in my life and I'm 20. I can't hold down a job because of my depression but I don't tell them that because I'm afraid of what they'll think of me. So I've been pretending that I'm looking for a job for months when really I'm struggling every day to get out of bed and take a shower.

Every night I feel like my personality changes and suddenly I'm very dark and negative and I believe life is meaningless and that there's no use trying. That's when I struggle the most with suicidal thoughts. I feel like my whole life is fake and a lie, like I can't really be myself and I'm always hiding how bad I truly feel. I wonder how I'm supposed to survive in a world where I'm expected to work a 9-5, raise a family, and then grow old and die when I don't want any of those things. I feel completely incapable of functioning normally in society.

I've been taking medication for 2 years but so far all they've done is drastically lessen the suicidal thoughts and help me sleep.

Since I have nothing to fucking do I constantly make new Reddit, email, and gaming accounts only to delete them when I feel they've been ""tainted"" either by something dumb I said or by not becoming popular or well liked.

I was super cringy in middle school highschool and went through an edgy phase where I was into metal and dressed in all black and told people I was a ""witch"" even though I was an atheist. I think I did it for attention and because I was trying out different personalities to see where I fit in the most. I obviously got made fun of for my stupidity and I still cringe at myself to this day and constantly put myself down for being such a fucking ass.

I still don't know who I am in this world and on top of having and existential crisis I feel as though I'm having an identity crisis too. I can't bear the thought that I'll never amount to anything in my life while other people were rich and famous or be loved my many friends.

And that's pretty much it. I don't know what'll fucking fix me, and I don't even know if I should have posted this rant because I feel super ashamed. But here goes.",4.951854636591476,5.000660730158732,6.028487886382624,81.37022556390978,68.68253968253968,9.234753550543024,29.753550543024225,9.063066167217693,2.2646031746031747,2420,83,501,41,38,809,274,630,0.21899999999999997,0.66,0.121,-0.9973,7,0,3,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,4,7,30,46,8,9,26,0,49,13,2,6,7,97,103,58,4,10,17,0,8,5,3,2,7,5,3,3,22,34,0,1,21,3,2,4,17,29,2,1,22,16,67,17,62,74,13,71,0,5,3,5,26,36,5,12,31,315,89,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588594531677654,0.0,0.0,0.043277033302997966,0.0,0.048684033199574615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052369875186194965,0.056652635591015264,0.0,0.0,0.11958278543166785,0.0,0.053136313240136734,0.19397020231084736,0.07028481325057752,0.0,0.07169990883263724,0.0,0.0,0.06947783708377446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732213872093039,0.0,0.06672479109940628,0.13754335373972906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312661263372587,0.0,0.10962519342759648,0.0,0.06604773990089895,0.06648971871326986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512529013623751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05316262516608263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406656164291658,0.0,0.16085703708810506,0.0,0.057195067222194224,0.0,0.05999364436913303,0.07161211546065423,0.25742429335833106,0.13639218621927865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14750312887044995,0.17650104017180748,0.0664980104416669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05089831115761414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764579853309025,0.0,0.0,0.08531241305482368,0.0,0.06383559408930069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18945711269278934,0.0,0.07040766315028407,0.0,0.13989839047690925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22475225778801267,0.15545519343610573,0.06378348444898634,0.05619483275827572,0.0,0.053441140882876687,0.07119630735918417,0.0,0.0,0.05743712147253744,0.060217221131891416,0.08495970319188559,0.0645204509848993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411008771965837,0.06413363450958964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05079643119356505,0.0,0.04678234523823743,0.0,0.0981653909129492,0.06146341289715156,0.0,0.1194426945763724,0.12470637020855847,0.12212760786825995,0.0,0.06677893606414541,0.0,0.0,0.193602789612374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08823921435245002,0.16670263550677927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174395933852071,0.12189807351708908,0.06474423686615012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397526156047184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153816962995064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05434777399189223,0.1210714504517304,0.1518260225739085,0.0,0.06440655817380142,0.050712431533416175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052643241098683694,0.0,0.06368544645862864,0.0,0.0,0.14697835820725058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13566245081370285,0.10164515270174744,0.0,0.0,0.13305961839780284,0.0,0.13922253886647284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569794805697668,0.0,0.055623716471712034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0422792472279394,0.08155522696057847,0.12505094529670294,0.15156793171663072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06081025683084236,0.0,0.08641406823920221,0.0,0.06216653140727332,0.06625095010748733,0.0,0.054964083660307694,0.0,0.05250924146167429,0.07507243629297337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443908282492132,0.05899444182398824,0.0,0.0710512142954166,0.0,0.0,0.06901430873672082,0.04633030432019181,0.06462898796169342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04098174298531016
mentalhealth,iwhaciyy,2020/02/12,"Finally got my diagnosis First time posting. Just wanted to share my long journey so far with someone. 

I’ve been battling with severe mental health issues for the past decade or so, and I’ve never sought out treatment until a few months ago as I was afraid I wouldn’t survive this round of depression. It was clear that I had depression and anxiety but I wasn’t sure what type really. 

Anyway, finally started medication and also meeting with a psychologist. Turns out I have major depressive disorder, persistent depressive disorder (together literally called “double depression”) social anxiety disorder and generalized anxiety disorder (one can only assume that’s called “double anxiety” lol).

I feel extremely relieved (I guess that how I’ve been feeling feels legitimized somehow - not to say that it’s not legit without a diagnosis ofc but) and I’m glad I have a name to what’s happening me.

Are there any other people on this subreddit that suffer from this sort of combination of disorders? Any tips/advice/stories are welcome. Thanks!",7.048981846882397,9.393295591160221,7.771479873717443,62.372168508287295,65.46408839779005,11.801262825572215,36.685477505919486,11.491704259439757,5.443286977111288,846,43,118,30,14,281,120,181,0.207,0.675,0.11800000000000001,-0.9413,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,8,14,1,1,5,1,12,2,0,1,3,32,23,14,0,2,7,0,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,13,10,0,0,4,0,0,1,6,8,0,2,7,5,11,6,17,15,4,17,0,6,1,0,8,4,0,5,11,82,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982964279602121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103961933474799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13782604729817954,0.0,0.31009185936809075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069539814895824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4364095093071375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5807081822045543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15371796304620985,0.0,0.0,0.2220207125243335,0.0,0.08619768656920634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104891331034031,0.0,0.11163475993150272,0.0,0.08961247982538703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771709977054916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577009634245156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968056189051772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208694205626116,0.1021244372440674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088668277289271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07815778242171675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686689611010012,0.0770717895891621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673817860400397,0.07025471250389809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097053381227032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06491944321450321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058770426744412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144826112281386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330089242647264,0.08586299549865332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172725470565162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550946187960216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329802072633127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059090752890268675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022617800090223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05977152525025407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768580270857274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,teabit,2020/02/12,"Will therapist tell me if I have a mental health problem? I’m considering divorce. Before actually starting the process, I want to make sure I made the decision with a good mindset, but not due to depression or wife yelling at me/beats me up. I’ve booked a marriage relationship therapist session for me and my wife. Neither of us have gone through this process before. 

I’m slightly anxious on how the session usually looks like. Will the therapist tell us “yep I think you should divorce ASAP” or “nope you have lost your mind”, or they basically listens to you and let you vent out? Will they be able to identify if we made the decision on a clear mindset?",4.071928152492667,6.374212072580651,4.888621700879764,80.09156891495604,73.43548387096773,8.380058651026394,34.65982404692082,9.095868883498916,3.4104451612903235,523,29,95,12,11,169,79,124,0.031,0.8029999999999999,0.16699999999999998,0.9457,0,0,0,0,3,0,12.0,3,5,2,1,1,6,0,0,9,1,9,1,0,4,2,25,21,9,0,5,7,2,0,1,0,4,1,2,0,0,1,5,0,0,3,1,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,3,18,3,13,11,1,9,0,2,1,0,19,5,0,5,4,62,19,3,0.15016200819222986,0.0,0.14653645886552058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16964032734091058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555536180341734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293343176214215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12594876808341884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15961519281627054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15355082716387602,0.0,0.07336157222671233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609826761331258,0.0,0.16391957035439658,0.0,0.0,0.2841738458339037,0.10023430649541654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15132798577651346,0.0,0.1516208218974485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368476201778707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16121780023566662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628544227807486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152591562680564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26249642763687225,0.0,0.0,0.5230489957408474,0.0,0.09621775157343808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3612528137896808,0.0,0.1653822372950185,0.0,0.08856944299525536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheGreenKnight137,2020/02/12,"Anxiety and depleting grades I’m currently a sophomore in high school. A while ago I had fun in school and enjoyed learning and doing the work but now I can hardly get out of bed in the morning. A class I held a 100% in easily I’m now barely passing and I don’t even want to talk about my other classes. Instead of offering to help my parents only lecture and promise punishment if I don’t turn it around and that if I don’t I’m never going to get a good job or live a good life. 

I just feel like my life is spiraling out of control. I’ve tried reaching out to my teachers but most are little help. It’s reaching a point where I’m struggling to care about any of this anymore.",2.1496620046620016,3.7143912797202816,3.993164335664337,87.65846445221447,76.76223776223777,6.724708624708625,27.301282051282055,7.492282038375204,1.4989351981351984,535,22,112,7,12,181,87,143,0.062,0.685,0.254,0.9803,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,9,9,1,1,9,0,8,2,0,1,1,23,20,12,0,3,6,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,5,10,0,2,2,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,2,2,11,7,19,18,1,20,0,0,0,0,5,12,0,4,7,72,16,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15740442577399724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207531787749168,0.0,0.135839989845722,0.0,0.17610098123190385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580742789297939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810436842441996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991590123437267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728281460499795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978434791055738,0.12685550732900608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18554520793555945,0.0,0.10091669658073676,0.2978733235437806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15906716940467516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380418498930477,0.18761166133421445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17621008075267133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508448245491173,0.08675136594069151,0.17797103712333304,0.15679690053561382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369523520180829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504941582817614,0.0,0.0,0.1971696376754676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678603362393632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35941912094512074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18563393400396333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272343655144254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055786446472275,0.1931443531718341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473494402082756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927252848186493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Call-Me-Cal,2020/02/12,"Anyone else been there? I feel like I'm one of the very few people who speak up when something's not right in my entourage. I get called ""difficult"" and ""easily defensive and irritated"" for it too but I can't help but speak up in unfair situations. This has created so much tension for me with so many people. Eventhough I feel like I'm doing the right thing, there's this constant anxiousness. Anyone else been there? Would love to listen to your opinions.",3.109540229885056,5.739198804597702,3.9133333333333375,84.22333333333336,78.19540229885058,7.085057471264367,23.459770114942533,8.167268648758528,1.5688528735632188,364,12,67,7,9,116,61,87,0.152,0.6809999999999999,0.16699999999999998,0.1294,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,7,6,1,1,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,11,13,7,0,1,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,5,7,3,10,10,2,8,0,0,0,1,8,6,0,1,4,45,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122157118992372,0.0,0.2626965430444108,0.3849466560850091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918146609386495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20299785362125605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31384719095936753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899640280714472,0.2683984872204146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814326190770437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12591111287100235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835469020859942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954090561397456,0.0,0.0,0.19044923231106045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380905061934328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729123059911648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604614564316726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32084375346332833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21114995850505225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461520887107202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247984174682092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499496009338973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334424210991524,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ya-boi-jameson,2020/02/12,"My parents got rid of MY dog behind my back and I feel like my life has been ruined. I’ve had my dog for 3 years which isn’t a long time but I was extremely close to him. He was a male cockapoo and he was very energetic and to many, annoying. But I didn’t find him annoying. I loved him. I adored him. He made my day everyday. Nobody will ever understand how much he got me through. My mum didn’t like him because he hurt her sensitive ears and the rest of my family simply didn’t care for him. I took him out 3 times a day and bought food for him (16 btw). Whenever I woke up late and couldn’t take him out my parents would say ‘How about we just get rid of him’ and stuff but I never actually thought they would do something like that. I came home one day after school and he was gone. I cried for the first time in ages and locked myself in my room. It’s been 3 weeks and I still miss him so much. I feel horrible. I can’t smile, I don’t feel like doing anything. I’m overthinking everything in my life and my parents are dickheads. And I’m not just saying that as a teen that’s going through a stage. They are cunts. Ffs why didn’t my dad just wear a condom. I didn’t even get to say good bye to my dog and my whole family is acting like everything is okay. It’s really not. Nobody understands me and I really thought I would get over this after a while but I haven’t. Someone say something",0.2765656565656585,2.3919841986532013,2.2230303030303027,95.15454545454548,85.8013468013468,6.0242424242424235,18.427609427609426,7.348242739294969,0.2287225589225588,1085,28,254,18,33,360,147,297,0.113,0.752,0.136,0.7264,3,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,2,1,11,16,3,0,9,1,28,7,2,3,2,45,53,23,0,4,9,5,3,5,0,4,2,5,2,1,8,19,1,0,8,0,1,5,13,6,0,2,22,8,51,10,25,26,4,35,0,3,0,2,33,9,1,0,26,159,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.09835870401403976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294343999374558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750302460249638,0.0,0.0614420247470267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527949139434973,0.1027644241318658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107155621950281,0.1950080035575622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06657233558719487,0.091172367515269,0.0,0.0,0.18117116411737588,0.0,0.19003594047323688,0.0,0.15289078181768934,0.1440120180170125,0.0,0.0,0.09212229749163924,0.08573384287222405,0.12187839804098714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15797938373430964,0.0,0.05728256278424641,0.08453976366536049,0.16122555199052374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110285252707148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790019645552676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136980568374006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423851047268712,0.24621002938503625,0.0,0.0,0.08919797627795202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096894772677848,0.09537207124869676,0.0,0.10218752929252918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14818781336554734,0.0,0.07773720274969365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829944231166049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33575362250159074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291402023750563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32061619517137024,0.0,0.10200714578942882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854009528284699,0.15518960841513105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804928271625412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153830206794538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578323400588136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003558794845005,0.17631832796678126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198390688364646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098565896990163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316416838513989,0.0,0.0,0.08084946939617517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094933530150154,0.11253095617360068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21479978390246926,0.0,0.0,0.06490690932632236
mentalhealth,lvinayakl,2020/02/12,"Who should I talk to? My single mother raised me and my elder brother. He started working while he was in college because his studies weren't that tough. I wanted to do engineering which requires more time so I can't work and do college at same time. We had some major financial issues because of my 2 different stepdads. In which we lost our house, savings, jewelry etc. We now live on rent as my mom and brother work and I study. Since i was in school I had no close friends only the people who were in my class I had fun with. After school I completed diploma in there also I had no close friends. By close friends I mean those who hear your problem when you have something to share. My mom never really paid attention towards me I went to a school where our fees was almost nothing and completed diploma in CS by paid scholarship which I got on my own. Mom never cared if I had any problems she just thought feeding us was her only job she saw more as a responsibility than her children also used to hit me a lot, she sometimes used to hit me for something that happened with her and she released her anger when I did something wrong as kid. After diploma I decided to take a break and enroll for degree after a year because I was fed up with studies. But still wanted to get a degree as it'll land me a good job. As I'm older now me and my mom fight a lot but my brother just says sort it out between us. Just because I took a break from college didn't mean I stopped I still take different classes related to my studies. But it's less frustrating than college so I can work at same time but I don't want because once I do it'll make me change my mind and not pursue my degree or I'll do college and job at same time and it'll mess me up. So I'm at home most times and fights are not more often. But since I'm at home not even attending college or working makes me feel like I'm a burden to this household. Sometimes even in fights my mom says you just sit and eat for free it hurts.  Now, I'm having suicidal thoughts but I don't want to take that step, i have read a lot where if someone feels like this they should talk to someone, but I have no one close to me who i can talk to. There was this girl who I loved in school, we were close but never actually told her what I was going through. She was the one who actually cared about me when we were good friends. she found out that I liked her but kept it to herself but when I confessed she said she needed time but I took it as  rejection. But we were still freinds. Because of some misunderstandings and also that she didn't like be back I broke everything and went away. After 2 years she said she liked me back too but it was too late so she moved on. I liked her because she was different but her being the first person to show affection for me made me fall for her even more. But it's past, now I'm stuck where I have no one now. But we still talk sometimes, she can have anyone she wants but she still says we should meet and all just because she's nice. There's one more friend who's still in contact from my school who knows a bit about me but not everything. I don't who should I talk to, the girl or that friend.",2.2585407668106434,4.002831399696054,3.2586098224284115,92.26083959899748,76.94832826747721,6.076510424998666,24.15784141204074,6.8360192770164,0.6735983789260378,2503,83,548,24,57,800,242,658,0.099,0.795,0.105,0.8415,7,0,3,0,5,1,42.0,12,3,1,8,43,37,5,0,16,0,50,4,0,6,4,116,103,57,1,14,32,9,2,6,6,7,0,6,3,5,33,34,3,3,11,2,6,9,18,15,0,5,42,9,109,23,70,50,21,83,1,4,1,1,95,32,0,14,45,391,142,24,0.0,0.0,0.10218908385299456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05242967850424806,0.0,0.0,0.12561370917151726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03560571393698938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03661042299107284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049192725620281715,0.08052122239059498,0.0,0.2553390381424893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05716214359809769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676637578731173,0.0,0.05538856594307517,0.0,0.10979420921749064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16411110398999387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05357602519644431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05839379496560128,0.10374728985812724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411325345997093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05294826753474239,0.07481013669557307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044536286575403664,0.0,0.05740861604002314,0.2427132273416855,0.0,0.02735526163020172,0.0,0.029756657889871287,0.08783199295589261,0.041876038365789285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04630062871851809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05901206432579741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504009765308736,0.0,0.0,0.0604149141955005,0.05605107516348793,0.0,0.0,0.05464888339008296,0.15587380286994193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028774974226462306,0.0,0.059062898299377824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15347890717237012,0.0,0.04623369457696902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715571008667818,0.1335404924293188,0.04725577426245636,0.04954307137208568,0.06989968251387149,0.0,0.0,0.11406795550490265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052867364895713295,0.3066094045148769,0.0,0.055649015825668606,0.0,0.03882331532015462,0.12114678019474165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05023958827215685,0.0,0.0,0.05576031058172902,0.14191845058273214,0.07964230699547277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049982307142679636,0.03629893253381092,0.04571760045595525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020041638721533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05237287265664976,0.0,0.03354232627804249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996102343831888,0.12491322799575985,0.0,0.2649490169470069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866233214348289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872671938081292,0.12092486424879753,0.15535229014892302,0.0,0.037059759930715794,0.0,0.25088237020599863,0.043774220717154685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057271923629266176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118101687066343,0.21041971339848145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083133924344881,0.18318468692760875,0.0,0.0,0.05003098511847013,0.11634489255862325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12596214746243647,0.09044221797348093,0.0,0.0,0.15441259989367725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097074085681921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190588799223922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05724602303192315,0.0,0.06743457700336826
mentalhealth,lucky_omelette,2020/02/12,"Are these panic attacks? Context: For a long period of time, about 2 or 3 years, I was in a very unhealthy relationship, we would fight very frequently because he was jealous of my friends. The fights were really bad honestly, he would yell sometimes and say really harmful things, so I would cry a lot every time, and he would tell me to shut it already because It was annoying, and that made me repeat ""I'm sorry"" and cry even more.
We would fight probably 3 times a week. It got worse over time until I couldn't take it anymore.

Since then, whenever I have an argument with my SO, if something triggers me, I would start crying and hyperventilating. It feels like I'm living those awful moments again, my mind won't stop repeating things that hurted me in the past, that i'm annyoing and such. I start saying ""I'm sorry"" and ""don't get mad at me"" again and again. I get to a point when I think ""please just stop"", hoping the bad thoughts will disappear. All that while my SO is trying to calm me down.

Last time It happened (two weeks ago) I was able to calm myself, reminding me that everything is okay now.
Sometimes I think of what may be this thing that happens to me, maybe panic attacks? Sorry if not, I really don't know.

Other than this particular problem, I don't get this type of outburst, I'm generally a happy person, so I don't understand why I still have this thing, even though it's been 3 years since all that, and I'm now with a loving and caring man...

I will go to the psychologist when I can afford It, but right now I can't.",5.151422938453628,5.466108006514659,5.970862334990574,81.0334339105092,68.28338762214983,9.199314246528372,28.535744899708554,9.134995656068208,2.146013680781759,1206,38,245,21,19,397,165,307,0.14800000000000002,0.77,0.08199999999999999,-0.9271,1,0,1,0,3,1,50.0,2,0,0,0,19,25,8,2,12,2,29,1,0,2,2,45,55,24,0,11,6,0,1,1,1,10,0,3,0,2,27,14,0,2,6,0,0,2,8,15,0,1,9,4,32,10,21,34,4,44,0,1,0,1,16,8,0,6,35,161,59,1,0.08450661094268716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491001176355676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093255146565256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380785045140099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19227693943553864,0.0,0.0,0.1411189805872931,0.10302889133731456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616012192645123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784796319873861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163163905363084,0.0,0.07120046445945763,0.0,0.0759490928975578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04272908163217733,0.06037153974267497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528959798660801,0.0,0.13245364900743894,0.0,0.048027054454342515,0.0,0.06758765659669308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945783393849954,0.0899588587425358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393413243279756,0.0,0.0,0.09046607482144642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046442623335297716,0.06888416686540476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04128566151279947,0.0,0.07462088569527643,0.07478569141631519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07184449863846754,0.07627051573414871,0.0799621985583418,0.0,0.0,0.08489824915244792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532758692528694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983005999495057,0.0,0.0,0.08067112226713613,0.0,0.07378791310321893,0.0,0.09276288195608133,0.0798860622914108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911124195691556,0.08086141380505348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16241129665598728,0.0,0.0,0.0907284744361611,0.0,0.07216818400877728,0.0,0.13440609773725296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980948367802526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505731772314631,0.16715839810152852,0.2837946968765936,0.11962842835674692,0.0,0.06748708866046946,0.1413026214072786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353845445140599,0.0,0.07386250274356095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245697491973605,0.10829684812935793,0.08302731618769091,0.06708880960845129,0.2463824221242207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057374441670454975,0.0,0.0825506796001771,0.08797436227704089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13945360855194386,0.0,0.0,0.1355722118760607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625407221327649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611945615234902,0.36018643080340706,0.0,0.0,0.10883897357803474
mentalhealth,nibbaman69xdd,2020/02/12,"I'm a bit paranoid I'm not sure this is specific to me or does this happen with other people aswell, so i came here to maybe find some answers. Also sorry beforehand, my english isn't very good. Not my first laguage and im pretty young.

​

So, I confess to smoking some drugs that a boy my age shouldnt and i regret it. i have had a few expiriences when i see stuff move. It feels like the way people describe LSD. I have seen tiles on walls move and jiggle. Also I've been sick recently for a month and my grades are dropping, I'm stressed recently because I'm finishing my junior highschool so i have to think about my future and what highschool i want to go to and i don't know. Also i think i might have ADHD because I'm actually supposed to study for my history test but i couldn't focus and now i found myself here.

​

I'm just really scared about my future and I'm scared of developing Schizophrenia or something like that. 

If anyone has a similar expirience or just wants to give general advice, I'm all ears.

ps: I'm not that open with my parents so they don't know anything about this.",2.4531428571428613,4.565130466666666,3.7974603174603168,86.92,77.66666666666666,6.5968253968253965,24.936507936507937,7.62386473244151,1.3357174603174604,885,32,175,13,21,290,128,225,0.08900000000000001,0.863,0.048,-0.8154,1,0,2,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,1,16,8,0,3,6,0,15,3,1,0,2,42,38,21,0,6,10,1,1,2,0,2,2,1,0,1,11,12,0,0,9,0,0,4,8,4,0,1,5,4,25,4,17,30,5,20,1,1,2,0,5,3,0,7,13,108,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.11452921484468782,0.0,0.1410473423848101,0.11468562175690256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28156509370097943,0.0,0.2543252046318253,0.285217425077153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206283571993504,0.0,0.0965796281500944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14308661187199856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812983888861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423183814220688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027050236548369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610364937302366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05934218489387912,0.08384404571522809,0.0,0.0,0.10726752153932596,0.09982878290437908,0.0,0.12868231072200434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258514292650952,0.06670001405299956,0.09843839294961793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378358341240553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12677202093040288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899910953595586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467512361013092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790676059317068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245034404566307,0.0,0.0,0.09367790964908763,0.2494762786429136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303175594264236,0.0,0.0,0.1627292499765701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940021432479445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518564895277652,0.0,0.2317633173810048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350013801658197,0.0,0.09352299891246532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035165815778992,0.0,0.13137810542341108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13443875171500644,0.0,0.1343523879995404,0.0,0.0,0.11061310012813104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15040275474296982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683664505178838,0.13844730306724673,0.09315717001116344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285217425077153,0.0
mentalhealth,YourLocalNewsSource,2020/02/12,"I'm ashamed of myself and my mental illnesses Every so often, I get triggered by something and my mental illnesses run out of control. I've been diagnosed with depression, OCD, and anxiety. I talk a lot about my anxiety and depression, but my OCD is still a bit foreign to me. So, I feel as if these incessant nagging thoughts are normal. I overthink,  tell myself the same thing over and over, and ask hypothetical questions. Sometimes I do it so much that I give myself a headache. Other times I do it so much that I sob, partly because I'm ashamed of myself and partly because I believe what I tell myself.

I'm in one of those ruts right now. I feel as if the entire world is conspiring against me. I feel as if the world hates me. That I'm a failure. That people think I'm an idiot or embarrassing. I get too scared to leave the house when I'm like this because I'm *convinced* that everyone — literally everyone — feels the same way about me and can't wait to call me out on it. I don't recognize that others don't perceive me this way. 

Does anyone else get super paranoid about these things? Does anyone else feel like their mental illnesses keep them down or that they're just a big embarrassment? 

I feel like I know what my problems are, but I don't know how to fix them. It's also partly because I don't want to fix them; I'm comfortable feeling like shit about myself because it's familiar. I don't ever want to acknowledge any good in me. I constantly seek validation from others and when I don't get it, I feel as if they're right. I'm unworthy of forgiveness or love or understanding. 

These bouts are embarrassing because I know that it'll be over soon. But right now, it feels like it will never end.",4.140735294117647,5.4565963088235305,5.262235294117649,81.55805882352944,71.20588235294117,8.498823529411764,28.894117647058824,8.954980946260402,2.303978823529412,1355,52,266,26,25,448,152,340,0.196,0.6890000000000001,0.115,-0.9821,0,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,4,2,20,25,4,6,11,0,18,6,1,3,2,58,54,32,0,8,12,0,9,5,0,2,4,0,0,0,30,12,0,3,19,0,0,1,8,14,0,1,2,9,45,11,32,49,9,29,0,3,0,1,13,15,2,11,16,181,75,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661967049604993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665084518012234,0.0,0.12745751808925312,0.0,0.0,0.11649879614920175,0.17071340755322706,0.0,0.0,0.07787973872266528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046948941365886,0.0,0.0,0.093857183006702,0.0,0.0,0.09094842903221853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506460276998082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002404559145707,0.09343461173424757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350243967110188,0.08455369984851048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458030484724914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13918272200252646,0.0,0.07378427029037476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535492464271196,0.07018878458704456,0.15920464884772415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3790975376560605,0.23805490766704995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740955054817061,0.07991457704427082,0.0,0.06987300751238062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224729525696553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09612378385998643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404608087778143,0.0,0.0,0.13734817503028796,0.0,0.0,0.08820888308523024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034951895647783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082366775249023,0.0751867960391636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518581558493493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247879279057827,0.0,0.06425061907224623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162206062274913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645021039595676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27063640252771504,0.0,0.05775379791051882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971246252471431,0.0,0.0,0.09332163473751667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134282617347767,0.0,0.0,0.08340370413274749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551227373832616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06413292517327515,0.0823916310471846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665281717522177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695809907184247,0.1456259965011829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068943068591486,0.0533790348315467,0.0,0.06613555180514484,0.04857632006700801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672434386382204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827191563598273,0.1322486368373288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway67iog,2020/02/12,"Will I fail the school year if I miss a lot of work due to being in a mental hospital? I'm in grade 9 and I live in Canada 

My moms trying to have me admitted due to an event Id like to keep private, and honestly I'm scared of what I'm gonna do to myself or someone else at this point. I've already missed a lot of time for psychiatry appointments and not being able to get out of bed. If I'm admitted for a week or so, does the school have the right to fail me?",5.128857142857143,2.8377698857142875,6.872380952380954,83.19428571428574,69.19047619047619,10.685714285714287,29.57142857142857,9.3871,2.050771428571428,358,9,90,6,5,127,65,105,0.136,0.784,0.08,-0.7757,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,3,1,7,0,1,8,0,6,0,0,0,0,14,17,8,0,2,5,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,7,2,18,13,2,13,0,4,0,0,3,7,0,6,7,52,9,6,0.21889371011398787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24155465224770145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19155536081943267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828576069728398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436292902984692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194562787107766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694041001331853,0.0,0.19328715634932636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721912092515266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22059337544482746,0.0,0.0,0.25636566772737485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20692530875748327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869340324224332,0.0,0.0,0.2191507901405768,0.4430642416256039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185467930242644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763868266405345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861446060689848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558333078838612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935722797448826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096037260121574
mentalhealth,Environmental-Goose,2020/02/12,"Living with anxiety is so weird. Something so small and simple can be a whole journey in itself. Every public encounter has to be meticulously planned and prepared for. I have to see my GP at least couple of times a year about my eczema. It should be something I am used to. It’s the same thing every time. How is your eczema? How are the medications you are using? The answers are always the same. However, I still have to prepare myself. I have to think about all the possible questions I am going to be asked and how I am going to answer. One random question, which I haven’t prepared for, can change my whole mood. From being confident, to feeling like I am losing control of the situation.

That is what happened yesterday, when I went to the opticians. I have to go every two years, but the last time I went was much longer ago. I was trying to put off going, but my parents made me book an appointment. Once the appointment was booked, I tried to think of every question I would be asked. I even looked at the alphabet, just to get used to looking at letters. Once I was there, everything was going fine, until I was asked about my hobbies. This one simple question caught me completely off-guard. This wasn’t in the script. I haven’t prepared for this. How do I answer? Is she expecting a specific answer, or is she just making conversation? Every possible answer went through my mind. After what seemed like a lifetime had passed, I replied with “Oh, just sports.” It was such a simple question, but for me and my mind, it was a test. Unfortunately, one that I did not pass.

https://zackhiwrites.blogspot.com/2020/02/my-anxious-life.html?m=0",3.890099009900993,6.574467630363044,4.160221122112212,83.22508415841587,75.66666666666667,6.680264026402639,24.951485148514852,7.793537801064563,1.5242150495049502,1304,45,231,20,30,406,152,303,0.027000000000000003,0.914,0.059000000000000004,0.7914,2,0,2,0,0,0,59.0,0,2,0,3,17,6,0,0,18,0,41,1,0,10,1,47,67,16,0,3,8,1,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,14,6,0,1,14,3,0,13,4,2,0,4,16,4,36,3,36,43,7,32,0,1,3,0,16,7,0,8,14,179,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455109741026593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997936550765932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433758304698768,0.09501100122184382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358712565345171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896846473468699,0.0,0.0881790498139843,0.0,0.09432722654627093,0.0,0.09305694984206173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055548390670548564,0.0,0.3542966178090726,0.0,0.07558520002237852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04252435491621938,0.06008228318492264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04393967578355425,0.0,0.23898471850832825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437087029064557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685541239830126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059403529658921525,0.08217570123478085,0.0,0.07426335662405101,0.0,0.1412485208685582,0.09408830855452617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957907779640858,0.056138548929868914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472363158377821,0.0,0.0,0.16983751824064494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06182443861130736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17913116691572256,0.17096849933135605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338500358176643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896240980339368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454545429148176,0.4710658511960997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701817949060862,0.07656304420603313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09453385324759217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949122064317814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671637395618402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055873443527999306,0.10777796831216513,0.0,0.0,0.14712116193442645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419909005846934,0.0,0.08215515671765593,0.0,0.0,0.21791064121167705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23388940176353495,0.0,0.18779312640681656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05974344651783976,0.0,0.0,0.10831749628955294
mentalhealth,mflomim,2020/02/12,"Mental Health Blog Ideas I recently started a mental health blog to answer peoples questions, or give them tips on dealing with their issues. I have a lot of ideas - but I want to write about things people are curious about.

So I'm looking for suggestions that you would personally want. Want topics interest you? What kind of advice are you looking for? What are issues you feel need to be addressed more?

Thanks guys!",3.5534064327485333,6.613203434210527,3.5401754385964916,84.721783625731,80.44736842105263,6.0093567251462,24.23391812865497,7.3871296695380915,1.448358479532164,335,12,56,5,9,102,53,76,0.0,0.7959999999999999,0.204,0.9374,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,4,2,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,6,2,0,0,0,15,17,3,0,5,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,4,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,9,3,11,15,2,3,0,0,2,0,13,1,0,3,2,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590890470358145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784257516810966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231800551076605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15617531495391107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161200403369995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461036031234776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36756917061181416,0.0,0.3398477263574511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16953410081826645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734267584341583,0.0,0.0,0.13840914920076253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3281339339103987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071623995530015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257339752536785,0.1421531567129351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823764353914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16074815977437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523268519418885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988697804923978,0.0,0.0,0.1081589701079522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28807599207598017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565046358438492,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mrsmilestophat,2020/02/12,"Why do I find alot of people I talk to, even close friends, completely insufferable after a while? I understand the statement ""if everyone around you is an asshole then you're the asshole"" but these people are normally very nice and friendly to me, I just for some reason can't stand even their presence at times. It's almost like I feel as if I'm ""done"" with them which is awful but I honestly can't help the feeling. 
I probably am just the asshole and bad at relating with people.",5.594078014184396,6.2679114574468136,6.211489361702127,78.43333333333334,67.40425531914894,9.670921985815603,32.687943262411345,9.725611199111238,3.094253900709219,383,16,72,8,6,125,68,94,0.128,0.7,0.172,0.6709,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,2,0,5,6,0,0,7,1,8,0,0,1,0,22,12,9,0,3,6,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,11,5,11,11,2,9,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,5,5,53,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074459030142523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18442084303916528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729741887823716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172086452429101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21200180335475755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736611634719674,0.0,0.0,0.19795511211751432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20949777845566792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18934513030756486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201104543318274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885838649112456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121039393567023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029777934097033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4308665465488051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22335899532982975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21300020587219293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16651144429356513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079962431647664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156661546900069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17093288735263798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18693426252870135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thesnapening,2020/02/12,"Not really sure what is wrong with me So I’ve suffered from depression in some form or another since I was 10 and started self harming when I was 11 due to bullying at school.
Since then I don’t seem to be able to pull myself out of it. I constantly feel like I’m a burden to everyone, I have no confidence at all, I have no self esteem at all either. 
I used to use work as my motivation and distraction to keep going but eventually my mental health got so bad it resulted in me suddenly developing a form of epilepsy so I haven’t worked in over 3 years.

I dont feel like I have any actual friends and people only have any dealings with me when they want something or when they need someone to talk to but when it comes to me problems everyone always seems busy. 

Today was a good example of how bad it has gotten I was having a coffee with a friend along with a couple of their friends and I just felt ignored and excluded even though they were talking to me and I was talking to them. My friend picked up on it as I said I was going home but she basically forced me to stay and talk about what was wrong (she’s incredibly supportive and is pretty empathetic).

I have serious trust issues aswell due to my previous romantic relationship ships being very abusive from manipulation to gaslighting to stealing from me to physical assault. So I really struggle to open up to anybody so I’m venting, I suppose is the best way to put it, here in the hope it helps me feel a little better or someone can offer any advice beyond “don’t be so hard on yourself”.",4.364293255131969,5.505053980645162,5.854486803519063,78.18627565982406,70.48387096774194,9.249266862170089,29.574780058651037,9.573946990214177,2.726483870967741,1234,48,238,28,22,419,170,310,0.207,0.625,0.168,-0.907,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,5,5,17,28,1,2,9,0,26,1,0,7,3,48,48,29,0,4,9,0,5,2,4,0,1,1,1,2,9,16,0,2,7,0,0,5,7,15,0,0,12,6,38,13,48,33,7,35,0,2,0,0,22,16,0,7,14,170,47,4,0.09794291133867344,0.11604633419294505,0.09557815303173008,0.0,0.0,0.095708679411494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149634827681622,0.0,0.0,0.1998136149475138,0.10270168233835626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355647977930526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278504285250284,0.08662254583279065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436914566021522,0.0,0.10584149230039774,0.0,0.0,0.10837196849229544,0.0,0.0,0.10097484093136737,0.08435808601884558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478836264818425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469036921759731,0.0,0.0,0.1871772980707164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14856863648412955,0.1399408708605347,0.09404055438467744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026818013694512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113264272180913,0.08214986716092515,0.07833389345276376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773761061109482,0.0,0.0,0.1041087347359956,0.0,0.0,0.0656490689223488,0.0,0.09824472584955518,0.09727941044434177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222695307033933,0.0,0.08705615980275437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569991838506027,0.09816452768738816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870341821078572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262342772750302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448999754967722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790128255961185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996431519436536,0.0,0.09371813867200744,0.0,0.09845967790899893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548947395026558,0.0,0.0,0.10515403266639936,0.0,0.0,0.09316613738409528,0.0,0.0,0.09912345519721733,0.0,0.17832709600847185,0.20435163416298505,0.0,0.0,0.16203877674693928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597342188099484,0.07540123820622135,0.0,0.0,0.06932449675491116,0.1043941117680057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023911966171362,0.0,0.0,0.11114445511111597,0.09231003482995552,0.0,0.0,0.31489120848993296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622841310692416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283842778503393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691824571484332,0.0,0.08081315926587314,0.057769266720880626,0.07774252415337203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14260721189799674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141703964260664,0.0,0.06307202371761986
mentalhealth,Munemu,2020/02/12,"If you're struggling with your mood and seem to find no way out of it, try checking for food intolerances I found out in november i was lactose intolerant and after cutting lactose from my diet completely, I found that my mood has improved by at least 60%. With all these studies coming out about how gut bacteria affects your brain, I thought this would be a good heads up.",7.280070422535211,7.293933028169018,6.9550352112676075,76.81311619718312,63.78873239436618,9.916901408450704,37.46830985915493,9.516144504307137,3.4798422535211277,299,14,55,5,4,94,59,71,0.09,0.828,0.083,0.128,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,2,5,1,1,1,0,4,5,3,2,1,18,9,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,8,2,0,5,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,4,0,8,1,15,3,2,9,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,2,1,39,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27823031589146285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146951406797625,0.26131968552875795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277976083918769,0.0,0.3013777157575758,0.5465498261571407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20904771701695146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25578851183948176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268955117712325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605560621725182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19786590860672693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921519547275052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19783230029528148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17705042965852108,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,smarshall4444,2020/02/12,"2020 NY Marathon Charity Bib for Mental Health nonprofit Hello! Is anyone looking for a charity bib for this year's NY Marathon? My organization is currently accepting applications for any interested runner looking to support a great cause - mental health! 

[https://quell-old.live.themoderati.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/Application\_NYM2020.pdf?fbclid=IwAR317quVg3QO\_99tMohJzzs05zdXjKOFSO6dftq8abwc3QYeE7Ffc64s2iI](https://quell-old.live.themoderati.com/wp-content/uploads/2020/02/Application_NYM2020.pdf?fbclid=IwAR317quVg3QO_99tMohJzzs05zdXjKOFSO6dftq8abwc3QYeE7Ffc64s2iI)",27.14059523809524,35.83774139285715,13.546428571428573,14.56523809523813,27.928571428571445,15.161904761904767,52.19047619047619,12.45797560212912,10.079283333333333,522,24,29,16,6,121,39,56,0.0,0.637,0.363,0.9573,1,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,5,5,0,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,11,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392460032454974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14317519619619254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21034821950328314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257521599828092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4353074304393425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616193286565687,0.0,0.343899048010975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4127063062083428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42972908437671015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23236286217813695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13186079269309164
mentalhealth,Philosophy-rocks,2020/02/12,"What do I have to do to convince people I’m not fine? You know, at the start of my struggle I constantly pretended to be fine. I laughed at jokes and went out of my way to make people happy. The only people who believe I’m struggling are a few friends and maybe a few teachers. My family always think I’m fine even though I’m not. Because into school one day this week. Because I showered. My dad thinks I use this excuse to not do anything. It’s not that. How can I be expected to do things when I can’t even get out of bed. I attempted suicide last month and my family still think I’m fine. Like that pain just goes away because I failed at suicide. It doesn’t. It’s still here and I want to kill myself everyday I live on this earth. Whenever I tell someone e.g a teacher, or friend and they someone for me, I’m labelled as an attention seeker. Like I do this for my enjoyment. Like I want to struggle. I don’t. I fucking hate my life and my mental is never taken seriously enough by my family or my psychiatrist. I don’t what to do to convince them that I’m actually struggling.",1.0884077380952384,3.3148155491071414,3.2214285714285715,88.59023809523809,83.24107142857143,6.2333333333333325,24.065476190476193,7.492282038375204,1.221783333333334,849,33,177,14,24,288,118,224,0.171,0.679,0.149,-0.8507,1,0,0,0,0,3,24.0,0,1,2,2,9,25,3,4,6,0,16,3,0,3,1,28,37,12,3,3,7,1,0,3,2,0,2,0,2,0,14,9,0,0,5,2,0,1,9,10,0,1,2,0,32,15,25,33,3,21,0,1,0,1,9,8,1,2,14,119,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.10842326553992312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924489533378814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143063351010493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438758723452604,0.0,0.0,0.2031872531638838,0.0,0.0,0.12517822629664924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006593411590667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071654070557612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148020256760509,0.0,0.1467687093142871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142220728088952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168018152164655,0.10271555202760796,0.058048211879698074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182742249505546,0.0,0.10969400751382644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292214222220425,0.0,0.06106086000239136,0.09056608277666067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847733545029077,0.16284209310522607,0.0,0.09810848585787607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416400610128104,0.0,0.1116207426208374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119685470257343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868361567728897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569166766225167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528818770252196,0.08450099241524002,0.11822443957328105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23108038466755296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124450343847372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18827922304795605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078641280268138,0.0,0.17745852308622534,0.0,0.0,0.4646077601472263,0.0,0.2430634956105894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711139499785776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381377833414901,0.21357639407831824,0.10916091654662724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595976640190784,0.0,0.0,0.1310661975994726,0.08819063847390568,0.08912239721918386,0.0,0.0,0.10299622006668713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwback6482,2020/02/12,"What to do if my dog is my biggest trigger? Throwaway because I want to make sure I have privacy from friends on Reddit.

Basically, my dog is my #1 trigger of my bipolar disorder depression and anxiety. I got him at the recommendation of others to try to HELP my anxiety and depression through walks, affection, unconditional love, etc. However, the dog I ended up receiving from the non-profit has worse anxiety than I do, doesn't like to be touched, and is extremely needy. He also hates our apartment. I work SO hard to try to give him a good life (seriously, I even get commended by his vet for being such a responsible pet owner), but he is still terrified of everything and unhappy. He makes me feel like an absolute failure, especially considering the fact that he doesn't act as badly around my husband. I feel anxious about his well-being 24/7, I feel rejected, and frustrated, and it triggers self-harm and suicidal thoughts. I've been dealing with this for over a year; I realized within a couple months the effect the dog was having on me and wanted to find it a new home - NOT a shelter, but work with friends, families, and non profits to find a safe and loving home where he can run around a yard, maybe have a dog sibling. My husband says he has bonded too much to the dog to give him up, its like a ""son"" to him, and immediately shuts down the conversation if I bring it up -though he has seen me attempt and self harm and go on more medications because of this. He thinks I am just projecting on the dog. Maybe I am, but regardless, my family and therapist recommend I find a new home for the dog for my own safety. It will break our hearts, but I just can't do this. But I also can't hurt my husband, I love him so much and this will leave a huge rift in our relationship. Looking for advice, I have no idea what to do. But I just can't take this pain anymore.

​

tl;dr I have a mental disorder and having a dog is causing me so much anxiety and depression it drives me to self harm and suicidality, and increased medication use. Husband is in love with the dog and refuses to give it up. What do I do to take care of myself and not break my husband's heart?",7.631818891491022,6.332338583138178,8.340468384074942,71.48144418423111,63.63700234192039,12.161436377829821,37.663544106167045,11.303756567709739,4.155599843871975,1713,74,335,43,21,579,204,427,0.177,0.68,0.14300000000000002,-0.9366,1,1,0,0,0,0,62.0,3,0,0,4,17,26,2,0,26,0,35,11,2,9,2,65,62,36,2,5,13,6,5,3,2,2,5,1,5,2,17,26,0,2,11,1,1,8,8,12,0,0,5,8,49,14,52,53,7,37,0,5,2,4,43,21,0,2,9,231,66,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709720333138112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618775249843533,0.0,0.08548483111229598,0.09586845097913396,0.0,0.0,0.24142385615169265,0.08913111592589068,0.07824459131914828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14047005605997162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587567217125175,0.09618971794805592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044071637480431,0.08104891859223343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729799367881702,0.0,0.0,0.08133930893737293,0.2038615269931312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18084551968872467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987929517177305,0.0,0.08799097401664609,0.05211070281001346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090750690802494,0.0,0.14875407824999115,0.0,0.11967803177427815,0.056364009207139326,0.0,0.0,0.21633119633341408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12191120245509725,0.0,0.04122040906468854,0.22705548062589515,0.044838964700826434,0.0661750329342772,0.06310111212903421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07067618576169347,0.07789442112421642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18698657226131496,0.052882974107929664,0.0,0.23742027321764445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446083528602462,0.08906507271561727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354049655335982,0.0,0.0,0.05572726126813116,0.11563521895659175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625358182733049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28483037334454736,0.0,0.10532867664232218,0.0,0.1585252162623261,0.0,0.0,0.15896078835594954,0.07950958627881148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297480658197477,0.0,0.17399504691201936,0.0,0.0,0.15239836532281867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395193586244787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470581651994326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274203509342635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469202310653489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300722000523863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726009534716737,0.0,0.07435945797782333,0.0,0.11864140112944445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160546002447156,0.0,0.0505539909292103,0.07751586979550053,0.06263537916350016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713172373445633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814164806723362,0.0,0.0,0.09307095093299644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093784875216763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487586371295,0.0,0.08040275004040763,0.0,0.0,0.09586845097913396,0.050807060205817184
mentalhealth,ddlovogue,2020/02/12,"Does anyone else experience this after an episode of depression? I am currently not diagnosed, but I’m pretty sure I have either MDD or BDII. I know it’s, in a way, dangerous to self diagnose, but I digress. Whatever the case is, depressive episodes are part of me.

This is something that I’ve noticed happens every single time I go through a depressive episode: while going through it, the **only** thing I want is for it to be over with, I can’t wait for the day the episode is gone and I finally feel better again. However, when I do start to recover, instead of relief, I get this weird feeling of emptiness, almost like a void, and it makes me “want” to relapse into the depressive episode. Obviously, I do not want to relapse, but my brain feels like something is missing, and because it got so used to feeling such intense emotions during the episode, it wants to go back to that. It’s the weirdest thing. Does anyone else experience this?",3.7663202247191023,6.050055337078657,4.725154494382026,81.00042837078651,74.28089887640449,7.820786516853932,33.035112359550574,8.660442795831766,3.014144943820225,742,39,133,15,16,241,106,178,0.141,0.703,0.156,-0.2356,2,0,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,1,6,12,1,0,11,0,12,3,1,2,2,27,34,10,0,4,7,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,15,5,0,1,5,0,0,4,3,7,0,0,2,4,14,5,21,31,3,18,0,5,0,0,1,3,0,2,12,92,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211692527567288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692193323892548,0.2479683036299752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304554811771587,0.0,0.07376366147477062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701928732148844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508184891363684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803835902498195,0.0,0.4168864887886579,0.2456355106207579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117849740801996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20216867535028302,0.13611459024222866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019521202075038,0.0,0.0,0.2367326564822041,0.0,0.0,0.2447355083982929,0.08644615626716907,0.0,0.13255530830087428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322023528005791,0.0,0.2063101722487875,0.0,0.09677893174156448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070045200360138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066501306599316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823408055985335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077192670037202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377652496425524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202992562391483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103686581538224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310581506183202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623483898360294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863114665681636,0.0,0.0,0.08564812042066505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404599166587845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16078098815054193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055911926453139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450966210502266,0.0,0.0,0.2854880652197729,0.09604831455228358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wearebobz,2020/02/12,"Meds seem to be no longer working I’ve been on 30mg of Mirtazapine daily for about 3months, past week each day is getting worse, I can’t process correctly and sleep is non existent. It’s like I was before these meds, can my body adapt to them so quickly? I really hope not as the next meds doctors want me on are sedatives and I refuse to take them because I have my little girl every weekend and I need to wake up etc if needs be and function",3.111102484472049,4.380899706521742,4.029192546583853,89.58413043478262,73.67391304347827,6.9962732919254655,27.27329192546584,7.447530270364453,1.2952031055900628,351,13,76,4,7,113,73,92,0.083,0.8370000000000001,0.08,-0.0627,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,10,4,3,0,1,14,17,7,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,11,2,11,13,2,10,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,3,7,46,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132740769206067,0.0,0.15811903549422435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064040016711968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983845305695914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19019452572772508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20723829057203544,0.0,0.0,0.15656126710241555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970832202588192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18456107311355088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078220947962837,0.1862403409818673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6192120050135904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755661797979569,0.0,0.0,0.19762155532875728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738610578739103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904097625040208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16916344401253058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859540814758035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971342763228115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960138235098467,0.0,0.14905350292538594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527908907653494,0.0,0.18936633742129647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trinity695,2020/02/12,I dont know what's happening to me I'm not really sure what happening to me I'm 17f I got really drunk on Saturday and now I feel extremely off. I feel completely out of it I get really confused and I have really bad mood swings I cant focus at all. I feel numb sometimes and I couldn't even cry at first when all of this started. I dont know if I hit my head or if this was from drinking too much or something but I'm really scared. I feel like I'm just gonna be this way forever or something and I wont be normal again. Does anybody know what this is? It's been like this since Saturday I was really numb at first but now i feel confused. I feel like i just exist and nothing more.,-1.0846294544307788,0.994872205298016,1.983822138126776,93.6466004415011,95.158940397351,6.3198990854620005,17.786502680542416,7.62386473244151,0.6388370230211295,537,16,126,13,21,189,78,151,0.141,0.77,0.08900000000000001,-0.6591,0,0,3,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,8,11,0,3,0,0,12,5,1,0,3,32,32,13,0,4,10,0,6,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,10,6,2,0,9,2,0,0,6,6,0,2,4,6,20,4,11,22,4,16,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,7,12,80,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10869406576887702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649025289724412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299556921664794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392056035414687,0.0,0.305137744613213,0.12752590533066716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598203208871151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39493462238826266,0.18599987284629116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22146045993152846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801317855626421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411607511210616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302338007853771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336012577794813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21462899750030834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19079671873088452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956965773512932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275478253825133,0.12491030551778368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5003761814850874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033193489375766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10768545202614907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004363790587961,0.12875040509400962,0.0,0.09214139873687886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269221018296893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333006732313303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaysjdnfnfn,2020/02/12,"Is there something wrong with me? So I’m 16, and for a couple years now, let’s say I had a knife or something & I’m near someone, I’ll have a thought like what if I stab them with it and kill them, or if I’m walking down the stairs with someone I’ll think what if I shove them down the stairs?  I don’t know why I have these thoughts. They don’t bug me or make me anxious, I just carry on with what I’m doing while thinking this. I also lack emotion and have anger issues and tend to have crazy thoughts like this when I’m upset. I’m going to my therapist on Friday but I’m afraid they’ll put me in a mental hospital if I tell them this, they only know about my anxiety and dissociation. Am I okay? What could this be?",1.4684615384615398,2.7969133375796176,3.024458598726113,94.88902498775113,78.04458598726114,5.849877511024008,21.63106320431161,6.297961479604792,0.06464370406663368,562,15,135,4,13,185,87,157,0.134,0.825,0.040999999999999995,-0.8875,0,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,7,0,7,8,2,2,6,1,14,0,0,1,0,28,31,17,1,6,9,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,10,9,0,0,7,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,4,1,22,3,14,23,1,15,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,7,6,86,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383264599548567,0.0,0.1874161926728875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232388527772648,0.1954102754624667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810487988418613,0.1913913543535368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19457136365312488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830455226125068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18053889093062533,0.0,0.0,0.19136901626820035,0.0,0.19012289405150265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17687663012629956,0.0,0.16901175872376795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154608326338397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17431611839761732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315537746076646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388565849992865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13755508649612674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931189535673415,0.2663261598177635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511860417757648,0.0,0.0,0.200835005724956,0.0,0.2216682511058847,0.0,0.4119637649172618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608124446085905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18911884136040624,0.0,0.11138895241154416
mentalhealth,random_person_here__,2020/02/12,"I need a abit of help and advice here Im being unreasonably angry and mad these days
I used to be a girl with bad temper but at 12 i learn to control it very well 
However right now at 2020 I am turning 16 and recently i start throwing huge tantrums and break items easily 
I did try to go up to my school teachers for help that just brush off and say its your choice to feel angry that i shouldn't even be 
Damn im in a desperate situation causing its starting to cause issues such as longer time to forgive someone impatience and concentration 
I dont know it could be the school stress as its my graduation year and i have to do well in exam or i will fail and retain or not get a diploma",3.6941666666666633,4.52062341666667,5.021833333333333,84.7065,71.77777777777777,8.26,26.9,8.548686976883017,1.6837216666666668,548,18,118,9,10,183,99,144,0.192,0.665,0.14300000000000002,-0.8416,1,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,0,2,7,10,4,1,5,0,12,0,0,4,0,26,21,13,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,8,9,0,2,4,0,0,2,3,7,2,0,1,3,13,3,19,13,1,18,0,1,0,0,6,8,1,2,7,77,21,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15843391414297747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537378968249614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3331092920304779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818452836867953,0.12944953617567667,0.0,0.0,0.10456199126743236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19001797647028573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708692738756427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197901779232998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470749221113523,0.0,0.0921435846788902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21734787300723574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502616487076828,0.16922411222716405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910373214901324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021912729438565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16008619461150433,0.0,0.0,0.13846019186240632,0.0,0.12893419957688,0.0,0.3281733085617142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18224362139367786,0.0,0.0,0.13737426445543324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22951630791289934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572212732868093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454071183139354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100772634201722,0.17635350407551406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003034549828827,0.0,0.1337762177420085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915530149746383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044079560176353
mentalhealth,Imnotjacob22,2020/02/12,"ADHD (maybe) I'm just here looking for advice. I'm a 21 M and I can't seem to finish any task to completion. I've tried making lists and reminders and all that usual stuff people tell you, but god that only helps so much. I've never been clinically diagnosed or ever had therapy due to my mother being super paranoid about psychiatrists and therapists and refusing to let me see one. I've always found it to be incredibly hard to put down my phone or video games to complete simple tasks such as homework, studying or buying groceries on time. I'll start doing things around the house and halfway do something before I walk by something else that needs my attention and immediately drop what I'm doing for that then rinse and repeat. I'm pretty sure I just failed a chemistry test. Not because I'm not smart enough to understand it but because I only started studying last night. Any help or advice is welcome including brutal honesty if that's neccessary.",6.252771639042357,7.381280607734812,6.7212292817679575,73.73978130755067,66.12707182320442,8.906261510128914,31.65791896869245,9.075114841892004,2.873949907918969,774,30,128,13,12,252,127,181,0.11699999999999999,0.732,0.151,0.8305,0,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,2,8,6,1,0,3,0,10,2,0,1,4,31,24,18,0,2,11,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,10,9,0,1,4,2,1,2,4,2,0,1,3,3,9,4,16,18,3,18,0,1,2,0,9,3,0,6,12,77,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16880967556970586,0.2745183606292134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168767768178622,0.0,0.0,0.1910398177193285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504218000402248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712503342500537,0.0,0.11952398296152453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29454634377878675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256736466327305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173391224636677,0.0,0.0,0.14513621029477167,0.0,0.0,0.12705716059686098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15401083605869514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12582759044729594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18829927325518106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620758709664169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449639462406462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363331335977328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795385489455985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09376039074599476,0.0,0.14111433556050915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325673948376277,0.10415180966666883,0.10833401087741214,0.0,0.0,0.1318153582756959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518161529605296,0.21365744607856046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737961534681397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14290174562900915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412044839290341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193112069880053,0.1278725773697567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21627113057103656,0.0,0.0,0.1988413936711152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16079695403505986,0.0,0.0,0.1323850646930027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277117728043695,0.0,0.16063210605000436,0.16308879974876508,0.09331762215752944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190532110837015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536540853679076,0.0,0.0,0.14622732274245254,0.0,0.0,0.154700558455371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,takeaabreath,2020/02/12,"Staying in bed for days at a time. Not eating or drinking. My brother, he’s 18, has been struggling for a little while now. He’s dealt with OCD since he was young. Since he finished high school last June, it seems as if things have progressively gotten worse. His anxiety and depression is keeping him in this constant state of isolation. His OCD causes him to not be able to do normal daily tasks if they’re not at a specific time. He hasn’t charged or looked at his phone in over a month. He barely leaves the house. It’s like he’s deeply afraid of living. He’s been in bed since Saturday night and hasn’t gotten up. My dad got him to take his medication I think once on Sunday afternoon, but that was it. 

Last month he was a patient at one of the mental health facilities in our area. He stayed there for a few weeks, going to groups every day, taking his medicine, eating, and staying on a good routine. He was of course being monitored by doctors and nurses who work there. He came home last Friday after being away for nearly a month and he seemed like a new person. He was talkative, smiling, and overall he just seemed a lot better than before. 

Until Saturday... as soon as he comes home it seems like he relapses. He goes to bed and doesn’t get up. For days. No eating, no drinking. He doesn’t shower. It’s insane. 

He’s done this multiple times in the last 6 months. He’ll go in isolation mode for days, sometimes over a week, until he’s so weak and delusional that my dad has to make him go to the ER. Every now and then he chooses to go to the ER without my dad making him. He’ll stay there for a day or so, then he’s transferred to the rehab facility and usually improves when he’s in the care of other people. A few months back he only weighed 112 pounds. He’s around 5’10” so that was the skinniest I’ve ever seen him. After being away for a little while, he gained close to 40 pounds!!!

Like I said, he seemed like a new person after being gone for almost a month at the local mental health facility. After a day or two of being home, he goes back into this same cycle of staying in bed and not eating for days. He doesn’t move...",2.4873453263644123,4.348003817551962,3.7878965601069647,88.20051993436249,76.64434180138569,6.405469794578828,21.325452777440137,7.273561745256523,0.6216549653579677,1675,43,343,20,38,548,201,433,0.066,0.847,0.08800000000000001,0.9276,1,2,2,0,0,0,57.0,1,0,0,4,15,12,0,2,26,0,25,13,0,3,1,46,53,31,0,3,13,4,0,5,0,2,6,1,8,2,14,17,7,1,7,2,0,8,12,4,2,2,16,3,18,8,66,29,4,96,0,1,2,0,54,31,0,13,56,197,32,4,0.06652000328519342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661017449555473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050887620439917326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059216905983494536,0.0,0.0,0.1249954655820907,0.10229955298311287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056603623365953114,0.0,0.0,0.058831537215024925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608116262718558,0.06782157667507517,0.06833436715211573,0.0,0.05730109274657073,0.0,0.07188449188718585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30029929339466777,0.0,0.05729358135682145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808604205628023,0.0,0.06807305861259877,0.0,0.13032855757949746,0.0,0.272266280391114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060171151313517135,0.11209194350398392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034753956204626575,0.0,0.1512194032842108,0.05579382273544085,0.05320212334511573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141530575314334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028203567241716,0.2001749610137897,0.0,0.0,0.07675515264451208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059126035329408674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168907239360099,0.0,0.07043507874877909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624915677499702,0.13334103744731435,0.058738381603781226,0.0,0.055860049268632486,0.0,0.0,0.05655292801524304,0.0,0.0,0.08880523745831484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670119050505513,0.13407303527945574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185737919063495,0.0707002362097897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284908673704338,0.0,0.062424516894550565,0.0651754796854874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084163252067922,0.0450756757772633,0.05059146000453873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04611659462843372,0.116165402144989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632757560516961,0.0,0.0,0.06732179465809952,0.0,0.302786563371193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507810234877665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578998416113606,0.0,0.0,0.3545073636697476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695411504748419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002952790782554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0441929343980401,0.042623332145142544,0.0,0.0,0.11636504656587708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649803774751178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326238574336362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671666842127576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641229093950736,0.0,0.048427354641036265,0.0,0.06778956631048122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,T-Marx400,2020/02/12,"Looking for help  Hi, I'm 17 years old and I really need some help right about now. I'm in science class and my grades have been getting worse and worse, my friend group from last year all split up and are acting like jackasses to me, and my class is filled with douchebags, i tried to befriend them but best I can do is make them not see me in a negative light. I'm pretty lonely and my parents have been pushing me around alot and putting a lot of pressure on me about responsability and doing my duties, and my stepfather is getting more agressive towards me by the day and thats a whole other problem in itself.. Every day I lose more and more interest in things i found interesting and now ive just lost taste for all hobbies i had, i dont feel like doing anything at all anymore and i dont want to simply run away, i keep having suicidal thoughts in my head and i really dont wanna give in to that shit.  Does anyone know what im supposed to do?",3.2095384615384615,4.568216005128207,4.305641025641027,87.34769230769234,73.56410256410257,7.046153846153848,25.82051282051281,7.554174236665415,1.2049589743589744,751,25,158,9,15,245,118,195,0.18100000000000002,0.6859999999999999,0.132,-0.8967,1,2,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,3,7,12,1,1,5,0,19,3,2,1,3,36,36,15,1,4,3,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,16,1,2,4,0,0,5,5,6,0,0,6,5,25,6,26,30,11,26,0,3,2,0,9,13,1,3,10,110,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324181804991223,0.0933618525798312,0.0,0.10987742412822346,0.11886309918982925,0.0,0.0,0.12544853684101726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012334994822356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722215935494364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684620929254122,0.0,0.4694612016385453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249824334632116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067512854865696,0.09538831271291523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14640024096000506,0.10315894900465457,0.0,0.13951971569541072,0.12808669630253336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370323362149769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17899428171824386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422692837162554,0.0,0.0,0.11868069912365453,0.0,0.0,0.07338032948634585,0.10883844404056477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13046444095109605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212505055257176,0.14937722941395504,0.14575529434634502,0.11351583100313853,0.0,0.0,0.08912712994095122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990050467994978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010912675777834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482606427744681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358401170273443,0.0,0.1277627481313452,0.0,0.13422672716331008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107552796747585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11402726075058747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639993561870313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13705865740104442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605165562120728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870624119247293,0.0,0.0,0.10600174151173028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065283421820143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875487475933968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490728091332312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721411330286032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719678857167787
mentalhealth,gwyndm275,2020/02/12,"I’m doing a project for school and need answers for a survey, so looking for some help [To what extent does physical activity impact ones mental well-being ](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScmxu9XiVMoGF2DXMPC0lqS2HZflRC88BmFHWpeDHxLWnK9jA/viewform)",21.395000000000003,26.32559316666668,14.646666666666668,16.77000000000001,34.0,10.0,35.0,10.125756701596842,4.090999999999998,225,6,19,3,2,62,27,30,0.0,0.903,0.09699999999999999,0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,12,1,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640751061262886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788595475502872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.349364689933068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4192655127597156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3084847436541209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28191614038353713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42104971664734814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37406550484183065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drinkeeper,2020/02/12,"Is this depression? Any advice?  

I'm going through a lot, I'm done with trying to help me and get out of this hole by myself. I need professional help.  
I feel like I don't deserve the good things that surround me. I have a very beautiful girlfriend and lately I've been an asshole to her because of this bunch of thoughts that fill my head. There's a lot of negative thoughts in there about me (like I'm not enough for anybody, insecurities, the thought that anybody is better off without having me as a friend or that my girlfriend is better off with someone else but me), about what I can become, about what I'm capable of doing to fuck myself up, the thought that I can trust no one and that's not true, that's not my true self, but I don't know what it is that it suddenly fills my head like that.

When we first started dating, everything was different. I was very affective, I had no worries about her, I trusted every word she said, she's not a bad person, she has been there for me and in the beginning that was the case for me too and now everything is difficult for me, I'm not saying I don't trust or love her anymore, but my own mind is hurting me with thoughts that are not real. I know this problem has been chasing me for years, because I know I have lost things and people because of this. I had a big progress with this issue, that's when I met her and we were the happiest couple around. I'm hurting myself and her with this, I don't want to hurt her anymore.

She told me that we might have to break up because I'm letting win the problem I have (is it depression?) and I'm putting those thoughts first instead of her love, support and care.

I'm going to therapy tomorrow (it's my first time ever), I want to fix myself, I want to be the one that I once was, I am now reaching for help.  
Have any of you gone through something like that? Any advice? I really don't want that thing to win over me. I won't let that happen. I don't want to lose her or anybody around me because of this.",3.5042974033564316,4.359719346246976,4.449852216748769,88.52479418886196,72.24455205811137,7.439893128496284,28.042832094848446,7.6298220110432995,1.4475387659681052,1562,57,340,18,29,507,165,413,0.14300000000000002,0.679,0.17800000000000002,0.9682,1,0,1,0,0,1,48.0,3,1,0,10,16,32,1,1,15,0,42,5,2,1,3,62,83,19,0,8,13,0,1,4,3,2,0,2,0,2,36,21,0,0,10,0,0,6,17,13,0,5,22,3,64,19,49,56,5,35,0,7,0,3,30,12,1,6,20,251,100,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556456356612847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16238818670894464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15787973070378472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171825968286794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06646103715914485,0.24261112669387175,0.087909779590086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140795992801534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115550496693345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807371538803996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711534748456294,0.0,0.0,0.08316300843329537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814564290183982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649394719338292,0.0,0.0,0.08224605144951938,0.0,0.0,0.07200098270621386,0.06706478029383492,0.0,0.1430751686062688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0402471598124339,0.0568648544581961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20311815211817733,0.0,0.0,0.06149724693071236,0.07358710377260158,0.04158668971819556,0.0,0.09047479899445204,0.06676305801357657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038828238252122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338110263850394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16005866163170676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556340388229043,0.0,0.0,0.0830796717542662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13123500052550638,0.0,0.08979005423665011,0.0,0.0,0.1627887741654559,0.0,0.1555503234234169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904984445587143,0.08689066158934405,0.13534281140126855,0.14368067454168765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444093985108253,0.0803713278219683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059020936808310574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476931297898473,0.10787538151627672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05518325742199006,0.06950193679460806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523291453856365,0.0,0.08001801360627459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059999380133103,0.05099254155227556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571596218032338,0.06329955487883933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303811362267151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744315953698425,0.0612784586832772,0.0,0.0,0.05633990118990244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903269105710776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09102729382144567,0.0,0.15864419921521386,0.0,0.0,0.3791517072864877,0.04641425623686059,0.0,0.0,0.07605933668425799,0.0,0.054041843045862376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313534355389487,0.2347449264849485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672966844810311,0.0,0.0,0.08083567166333913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051258526934004005
mentalhealth,leilohudders,2020/02/12,"Relapse after 6 years self harm free *trigger warning* I’m so ashamed of myself and feel that I’m stuck in such a rut. I’m currently failing uni, making bad decisions and letting my life spiral out of control. 

I got back results today from an exam which I’ve failed miserably and someone that I thought was a cool guy turned out to be using me. I feel like a failure all of the time, like whatever I do just isn’t good enough. 

I’ve been through hospitalisation and therapy, I thought I had coping mechanisms that worked for me but life just seems to be pushing me over that edge again. I can’t believe I’ve actually done it after such a long time free from those destructive actions and coping mechanisms, which has just added to my feelings of being a failure. 

I’ve been waiting a few weeks now for an assessment for my mental health needs as I knew things were getting bad again but it’s just become too much all of a sudden and the urges to hurt myself became stronger than they have for such a long time. I’ve been able to ward them off for years but not this time. I just did it and sobbed until I could barely see because of the headache. 

I wish I could just not exist, at all. Just remove me from life all together, I don’t want to hurt my mum and my best friend. 

I don’t know if this is even the right place for this, but I had to get it off my chest to somewhere as I don’t have anyone else to confide in about this problem. I don’t know where to go next or what to do. I’m ashamed, hurt and disappointed.",4.4099038461538465,4.8231586442307695,5.0170769230769245,86.87792307692308,69.92948717948718,7.906666666666666,28.42051282051282,7.734863291789972,1.4983520512820512,1195,40,258,13,20,384,163,312,0.188,0.716,0.096,-0.9872,1,0,0,0,0,2,24.0,0,0,2,5,20,23,1,3,14,1,27,5,1,5,4,52,53,19,0,7,15,1,3,2,1,0,4,0,0,2,17,11,0,2,10,0,2,4,8,15,0,0,14,5,31,10,42,33,8,35,0,8,1,0,6,11,1,3,22,174,48,4,0.1162154099966958,0.0,0.11340947588233995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126051681256304,0.1190764212433794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936247673831271,0.19407002605264487,0.07084383526154868,0.12835078976030367,0.0,0.13093497014214725,0.12196090287051653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13034546430818458,0.18557709669676686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892871355514792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970830626165409,0.0,0.0,0.12008158486388547,0.0,0.07675918224918192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17628600953008008,0.08302431212257637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978773747865816,0.0,0.1214355102182296,0.0,0.06604789568629657,0.0974759721024474,0.09294807985410378,0.0,0.0,0.11507152725746048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235315463489146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732330000772307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773790007729094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883813055654792,0.2462591429359664,0.11355395811456324,0.0,0.0,0.2056939615227949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757468860024258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711779912052138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543169826402885,0.08617225395243683,0.0,0.0,0.12359640696656687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142036825741308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120245213288812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924732514696613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260863530751162,0.10579814451544453,0.12123801826569106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846893975694038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290244960463266,0.0,0.07720835442544997,0.0,0.0,0.18452410830021884,0.2710645605945753,0.0,0.11015861996565073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640899398133462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10037280060915477,0.0,0.0,0.06854685985349789,0.0,0.0932209918938817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364198609082698,0.0,0.0,0.08460620259644734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14967782753197034
mentalhealth,Daniellah28,2020/02/12,"what can i do to improve my memory? i’m certain that my depression and ADD and all that good stuff i have are the main cause of my terrible memory but lately it’s been getting so much worse. i constantly forget what i’m doing while i’m doing it or what i was going to say, basically i just have major short term memory loss. its gotten to the point where i frequently have to smack my head and go “brain brain brain brain” to like remind myself to use my brain lmfao its funny i know but it’s not fun bc it’s getting to the point that it’s affecting my life and i feel like i have a cave man brain. i’ve been making to-do lists for myself for literally everything i do even the most simplest things to help remember but it’s still getting out of hand",2.890358649789029,4.094537677215193,4.705759493670887,84.77589662447258,74.12658227848101,8.30464135021097,22.66033755274261,8.841846274778883,1.3989983122362872,595,15,127,12,12,203,87,158,0.106,0.725,0.16899999999999998,0.8905,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,0,5,0,13,9,8,4,2,23,26,10,0,0,6,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,16,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,4,3,18,5,13,22,6,13,0,2,0,0,3,5,0,2,8,84,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8036045855440211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12324950807453385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12965259842915172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033360812771923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924372833480149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078276613309821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060664015427187,0.08571164832980392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880492137870702,0.0,0.13637147633646068,0.10063108055765348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313109517744192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804181062194359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593626426948251,0.0,0.13533936955564513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474335817105343,0.11722947984203907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008563104722186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819695689876356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268342370182797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359106409772759,0.0,0.0,0.09541058776817474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581384928600062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734504977965864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797074393445956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036216737934285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226689217380307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,17spits,2020/02/12,"How do I find a therapist? I've been struggling with this issue for quite a while.  I've [posted on other subreddits](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/f2r1zs/is_this_insane/) in search of what to do (TLDR: I'm having a really hard time getting over a girl I met for one day.  As in, it feels out of my control and it is effecting my life).  

Anyways, I think my best solution would be to find a therapist, rather than have redditors call me batshit insane.  How do you even approach this situation and where do I start my search?",5.500530303030303,7.703406060606063,5.684734848484848,76.3471022727273,69.20202020202021,8.586363636363638,28.536616161616163,9.188382445141503,2.5390494949494946,436,16,76,9,8,138,71,99,0.083,0.846,0.071,0.1697,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,4,6,2,0,1,5,0,10,1,0,4,0,14,16,6,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,4,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,2,10,1,14,12,1,12,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,4,56,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191184429312479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21320398550168135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341823855853437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465609918559174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13790774009744253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557349393574196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3816713879000496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908725373995512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18704013823489007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179287001370654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14747873755083832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14148552331891576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999687808379651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22208016878251494,0.0,0.0,0.13376001689128075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23469536932940946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477868312778409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21827883658918792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.484856326678977,0.0,0.13378799874129352,0.0,0.0,0.12175058369809096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14832263537161333,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,letodd_fdu,2020/02/12,"Study re: Parents and Siblings of Teenagers with Eating Disorders Hello. I am conducting a study examining the experience of individuals who have a child or sibling with a restrictive eating disorder. If you are interested in participating, please see the flier and click on the appropriate link below.

* Siblings of Individuals with Eating Disorders: [https://redcap.fdu.edu/surveys/index.php?s=EJ748YYRTL](https://redcap.fdu.edu/surveys/index.php?s=EJ748YYRTL)
* Parent of Individuals with Eating Disorders: [https://redcap.fdu.edu/surveys/index.php?s=T943NW7W4K](https://redcap.fdu.edu/surveys/index.php?s=T943NW7W4K)

 

\* As per inquiry from the mods, below is more information regarding the study: 

* As part of your participation in this study, you will not be asked to provide any information that can identify you (e.g., name, email address, date of birth, etc.). Upon enrolling in the study, you will complete a questionnaire asking about personal information (e.g., age, gender, etc.) as well as questionnaires asking about symptoms and experiences related to eating disorders. We hope that this information will help us as well as future therapists minimize any stress in family members.
* There are no conflicts of interest to declare (i.e., no sponsorship by private business).

​

Thank you! Additionally, please feel free to contact me at the email address listed below if you have any additional questions or comments. 

Lauren Todd, MA, MS  
Doctoral Candidate  
School of Psychology  
Fairleigh Dickinson University  
[letodd@student.fdu.edu](mailto:letodd@student.fdu.edu)",13.468603425559948,18.748191734299525,10.82447299077734,34.21520750988145,56.77777777777778,11.879578392621873,39.84387351778656,11.022393298168332,6.581243478260869,1327,63,126,42,22,399,132,207,0.055,0.825,0.12,0.9281,2,0,0,0,0,0,111.0,2,7,0,0,5,8,0,1,11,0,11,7,0,0,0,27,18,13,0,3,5,3,1,0,0,3,2,0,2,2,5,10,5,2,8,0,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,3,11,8,36,14,4,14,0,0,2,0,30,10,0,6,4,91,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212247020965767,0.11452702077988212,0.1922846565293444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643399010777201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988218812559932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5401072610385431,0.09647135751220308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4822188381213542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21023275137385616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18439392736538668,0.08885280421677491,0.0,0.04765686136200455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317541811413067,0.0,0.0,0.09361393131084092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093123424331633,0.1020661985397265,0.0,0.0,0.08229758774650626,0.0,0.2069217327428758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558429402189297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538849262902016,0.07510698504446173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796584189848156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796436499527954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677497576065805,0.0,0.10943433753880906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133740701627078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16948851045664465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452702077988212,0.0
mentalhealth,diamondinosaur,2020/02/12,"I need some help For the last few years I have had some problems with mental health, especially when it came to relationships. Last weekend I drunkenly confessed to a girl I’ve liked for a bit and she said she was positive about the whole situation, and I’ve been trying my best to talk to her in public and texting but every time I just get this overwhelming anxiety, self loathing and jealousy feeling, especially over Snapchat where you can see when they open and snap other people and shit. I want to know if this major anxiety that is currently ruling over my personality and mood is something to see someone about

Tldr; I get terrible anxiety when talking to a girl, should I seek help?",11.806976744186043,8.440596054263567,10.845643410852716,63.25730232558143,57.44961240310078,14.351007751937985,44.4046511627907,12.340626583579946,5.317597209302327,557,24,98,13,5,179,87,129,0.17600000000000002,0.716,0.10800000000000001,-0.9127,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,1,1,7,7,1,1,5,0,8,2,1,0,0,22,18,12,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,4,5,10,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,5,4,14,2,15,12,7,15,1,1,2,0,17,5,1,3,10,66,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3852755355221721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617618804584034,0.0,0.1832778232077352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920061658804104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14144331891816472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488347886862074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754172425761969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784450297343691,0.0,0.0,0.22504836093895592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226061702941812,0.27368375350706925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201605189566454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16918017918642309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244784095504468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638453215359655,0.1465834163386288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063528275878594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802366970785663,0.0,0.0,0.15968913845605592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26755191154868035,0.0,0.17513195951786373,0.0,0.17232296978711312,0.0,0.188700389466712,0.0,0.0,0.1422413416019981,0.12923964764183574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698657860196314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789022521949853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397722630821755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099017998286901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18742828560751776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810705918421014
mentalhealth,works_for_us,2020/02/12,"Hot desk anxiety article: What are people's experiences of hot desk anxiety? Read [this](https://www.opensourcedworkplace.com/news/what-is-hot-desk-anxiety-what-employees-should-do-to-have-less-hot-desk-anxiety) great article on hot desking, what it is and how it causes anxiety, and there has been some interesting discussion over on my [ProblemsAtWorkUK](https://www.reddit.com/r/ProblemsAtWorkUK/) subreddit about it. 

Has anyone experienced hot-desking anxiety as the article describes?",11.224428571428568,15.763593157142855,9.381428571428572,45.61357142857143,60.28571428571429,15.428571428571427,40.0,12.785403640627713,8.067714285714287,411,21,46,20,7,125,45,70,0.11800000000000001,0.764,0.11800000000000001,0.5204,1,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,0,5,5,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,2,6,4,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,23,6,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8589887019672775,0.0,0.0,0.15702667239272253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306983460115063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196754990652028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24759253983486254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569065095429624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22463378581905105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blackbacon91,2020/02/12,"Telegram channel to help check in with our mental health Hey everyone,

A few years ago I had a really tough time coping with my newfound struggle with anxiety and it made me learn more about mental health and the importance of checking in.

Last year I opened a Telegram channel as a way to inspire myself and others to check-in and have ongoing, safe conversations around mental wellbeing. I called it Mellow Millennial.

[https://t.me/MellowMillennials](https://t.me/MellowMillennials)

The channel features a scheduled broadcast of content pieces that aims to inspire personal reflection, thinking, and conversations with the people you care about. We hope to engage young professionals and individuals to activate their awareness of their mental health and struggle with issues such as anxiety, depression, or loneliness.

Mental wellbeing shouldn't have to be so serious. So I keep it fun with interesting polls, memes on adulting, and pieces of music and videos to help you get through the day.

Feel free to view and join the channel. Peace and love to everyone <3",11.151156069364164,12.36402969364162,9.232144508670519,59.68590462427747,55.53179190751446,12.00670520231214,40.99942196531792,11.602472056035307,5.302762312138729,879,41,119,22,10,265,106,173,0.08900000000000001,0.684,0.22699999999999998,0.9836,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,2,2,2,0,6,15,0,2,10,0,5,4,0,1,0,32,13,16,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,5,20,0,2,6,5,3,0,1,5,0,0,2,2,13,11,29,9,4,14,0,1,1,1,15,5,0,2,8,81,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168058912084006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927606548232816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11215585908034703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286476370953782,0.0,0.12845296575097756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125171271983865,0.0,0.10851311344525708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407734971059779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637032206634305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582342913452954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40175744174158295,0.0,0.0,0.1688939424717361,0.0,0.0,0.12513431965581054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149853771227735,0.0,0.1119837515359739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269687796750902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370891459242767,0.11921270911797795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6348303833819141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734408193926503,0.1100076933825003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807110151829945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26341962125192786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072789947752225,0.0,0.0,0.073464503352912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000325684358083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16226403390335456
mentalhealth,markiitka,2020/02/12,"Is this anxiety, panic or eating disorder? Hey guys! 

I was thinking maybe somebody else is familiar with these symptomps and can help me identify?

It all started probably 7 year ago (at a wedding dinner)...i suddenly felt like im gonna puke. I kept rushing to the toilet, to have some air...all fine...when i got back to the table - same situation. Since then I had these feelings all the time. I couldnt eat out, only at home alone, lost a lot of weight...finally i somehow learned to live with it and gained some pounds back.

Lately though I've been experiencing it again. I get really bad anxiety when im somewhere I cannot leave (theatre, plane) and at that time its impossible to eat anything. I feel like im gonna vomit, die, whatever...even tho im trying to be rational - i know im not gonna die, i know - it doesnt help. Its exhausting. All i wanna do is sleep. My job is all about travelling (its great, i shouldnt be complaining) but its hard, i cant eat with the colleagues in restaurant, im always like ""aaah, i want to watch netflix, so i will order room service""...sometimes i rather dont eat all day, when im working, its ""safer""...and i think colleagues notice and are weirded out...

I started therapy, but i cannot think of ""why"" this is happening. Its getting worse. Therapist says he thinks its not eating disorder (i dont have body dysmorphia, i dont wanna lose weight)...he says its anxiety.

I come from kinda broken family, so i dont really know how to do romantic relationships and just the idea of romantic dinner makes me nauseaus...im scared im gonna end up alone. 

fucking weirdo right? 
Anybody can relate?
Im just so tired of this...",1.4544235060748854,3.903292703363917,3.445747582444831,86.0994569799157,83.74006116207951,7.082535746755933,24.739978510620713,8.186683628785799,1.821249177617985,1282,52,256,29,37,432,180,327,0.162,0.747,0.091,-0.9732,1,2,0,0,0,0,86.0,0,0,0,4,16,13,1,2,7,0,28,13,2,2,5,50,54,17,2,6,8,0,4,3,0,6,3,2,2,1,18,11,7,1,12,2,0,3,12,9,1,0,7,8,27,4,26,38,9,29,0,2,1,1,10,9,1,6,19,141,45,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05372474182170133,0.0,0.0,0.12554183276541148,0.0,0.0,0.05043015428808103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13909332627030013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049874669080566654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932065924703388,0.05060458955823042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732108145454675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05220784885165965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039086714377206025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580168119037338,0.0,0.1389225034926713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841253607664236,0.0,0.0,0.3720985796099033,0.05062964783065818,0.0,0.05368010578462404,0.0,0.0,0.0400305703209578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05713519746246145,0.0,0.06128977488918048,0.04329788915654275,0.05819254196331985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603050061157555,0.06332965762287075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04847321893971007,0.06681979605100544,0.0,0.06001078605639884,0.053594862372474884,0.0,0.05429226380740529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124763243078285,0.0,0.0607940943041337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841829920203328,0.6546631741791741,0.0,0.0601434238476305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992461178968537,0.0,0.06836770889049712,0.06417441219549998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882904114530023,0.0,0.05351738337913009,0.0,0.0,0.06780410028996328,0.0661600609036964,0.05152618521599302,0.0,0.0,0.04045586386078923,0.0,0.060888209859402284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900184769594052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046094606062461414,0.0,0.07110964398859301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534495326944796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765321596185325,0.0,0.0,0.06506959150326726,0.0,0.0517583292584508,0.0,0.0963947639334,0.060678511057382034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05013501024759842,0.06812517904583018,0.0606511005817623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059942199780181886,0.0,0.08579636121654996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930976462796405,0.07036978224344062,0.0,0.15533892116365358,0.059546394685022874,0.0,0.07068124383592114,0.06965921093235862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04114839917044355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03574777392414873,0.0,0.0,0.14760680214669672,0.0,0.0,0.0546886890826078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04412285857386637,0.0,0.061764047804637526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03902913387649196
mentalhealth,helloimamess,2020/02/12,"What Can I Do With My Life If I Am Not Good At Anything and Do Not Like Anything? Crisis: what should I do with my life?

In high school, I did a lot of different things: National Honor Society, all advanced classes, 4.0 grade point average, cross country team captain and top runner, one of the top runners in three different track events, concert band section leader, marching band soloist, pit band for musicals, jazz band soloist, saxophone ensemble, leader at my church, extra church classes in addition to regular school, and all the usual family commitments and chores and all that...

Then, I went to college. I chose to go to the school that gave me an academic scholarship instead of the one that offered me a spot on their cross country team. At the school that I ended up going to, I wasn’t fast enough to make the track or cross country teams, the marching band was actually just a boring pep band (so I quit), sax ensemble was made up of music majors (not me) that had won awards for playing (I was only holding back the group), I stopped going to the gym after a while due to loss of motivation, I quit going to church out of guilt, and I ended up losing my scholarship because I couldn’t keep my grades up. 

While all of these failures were happening, I was diagnosed with major depression and extreme anxiety. I’ve tried medications, therapists, counselors, psychiatrists, the works. Nothing seems to be helping much. It’s been years since I started college. I kept trying to go back to school after I lost my scholarship, but I just got deeper and deeper into loans and debt. My parents also refused to financially support me in any way when they were still able to, so I wasn’t getting any help from them or FAFSA. I managed to scrape by and get my Associate’s Degree, but I will probably never be able to go back for my Bachelor’s. 

Somehow, I got the man of my dreams to fall in love with me. We are getting married in just a few months, and we bought a beautiful house together. The problem is that, because of certain circumstances, we are financially struggling a bit. He has a high-paying full-time job that he doesn’t like very much at all. I have two part-time jobs that I like decently enough, but they don’t pay very much. My fiancé wants me to try to get a higher-paying full-time job instead so we can afford for him to get a job that he enjoys more (and for the current financial situation). I agree that we could use more money, and I would rather not have two different jobs (because it’s a lot to balance and handle). 

My anxiety and depression have really taken control of my life. I don’t do anything because my depression takes my motivation and my anxiety makes me afraid to take chances. I’m just really at a loss. 

Alright, (more than) enough background info. The current situation is that I’m sick of jumping around to different random jobs. I need a real job, I’m getting married, I need to start an actual life. But I’m not good at anything. I’ve realized that I’m mediocre at a lot of things rather than good at any one thing. I also don’t really have a certain “passion;” I try to stay very neutral in most things. I’ve tried a few different careers, but they all have ended up in failure. If you’ve read this far, thank you for hearing my story. 

TL;DR, I need to decide what to do with my life, but I’m not good at anything and not passionate about anything. What should I do?",6.012006828528078,6.377752050075878,6.574551972685889,77.27008289074357,66.43550834597875,9.746297420333839,33.622192716236725,9.642632912329526,3.1494379059180577,2687,113,500,52,40,879,282,659,0.107,0.78,0.113,0.7077,18,0,0,0,0,0,98.0,5,1,5,20,21,32,0,3,32,1,42,12,0,7,10,97,88,36,0,14,23,1,0,3,0,4,9,2,1,1,24,31,0,6,6,17,8,15,15,12,0,6,21,2,71,20,83,59,26,77,3,7,0,3,35,33,0,11,30,338,95,33,0.10787351049210027,0.0,0.10526898529932494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08626640736690669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003652941238498,0.0,0.12378441039551147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266312123148676,0.04801514742515122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442210640100808,0.0,0.13151738150051828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05888496723155339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049465734383418,0.043064110190252206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936694477736392,0.05474467121496235,0.0,0.2817621468947863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433158676126331,0.16719325911801206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05084677259768759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16907837075150597,0.0,0.18392100587605625,0.18095836515346791,0.0862763007732564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04769609453521247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06079064316626754,0.0,0.07230534020684465,0.1139742865016097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06223577386656207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746673490268783,0.04794146630689474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904856266482063,0.07905232248743382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06034143263265512,0.05887833981898144,0.13756530154071467,0.04868002744108133,0.051036261949995575,0.07200640590501381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054335606475949455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04305180345073628,0.0,0.11894916344533847,0.11998026175440607,0.04159935074124225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0517537713409184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964682374676273,0.04102133284789727,0.0,0.0,0.0598903837161003,0.05840824983304368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050987667607505734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05815294471470268,0.05161019045256323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473675682121764,0.05395135129802536,0.061391835728484875,0.10365979962051328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729343792746777,0.0,0.04910199625314764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0446170413065822,0.12125434551603445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635342594821999,0.057489404578648776,0.04307396241244271,0.04509354251372444,0.0,0.0563864075082687,0.0,0.0,0.06120679067375026,0.0,0.0,0.081107454866035,0.0,0.0,0.04965771759895709,0.0,0.0626247300157116,0.14333273412585085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830975815523402,0.0,0.10537674511665307,0.0,0.0,0.04658403889785781,0.05940371577613979,0.13351041537589148,0.031813295697261934,0.04281248576500974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049999912482315965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0392666002027791,0.0,0.0,0.038315123405685235,0.0,0.0,0.03473350199247209
mentalhealth,BoneCutter19,2020/02/12,"I feel like everything around me isn't real So I don't know if this is related but yesterday I had an extremely bad panic attack. It got to the point where I passed out and when I woke up an hour later I couldn't move.

Anyways the entire day I've felt like distant from everything. The whole day is like this weird fog. I was scrolling through my phone and j saw a bunch of animal pictures and I thought that they don't seem real or like they could actually exist(they where dogs, cats, birds, ext). Also talking to people it feels like I'm talking from like super far away and their voice is just projected to me through like a tunnel. Also my chest has been kinda tight all day.

I can't think of a time where I've felt like this before so I have no idea what is going on with this.",2.7685470085470096,4.255450802469138,3.765061728395065,90.26431623931627,74.92592592592592,6.959924026590691,22.95536562203229,7.61054688173877,0.8203593542260204,618,17,134,8,13,199,102,162,0.114,0.716,0.17,0.8279,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,1,11,13,1,1,8,0,15,1,1,0,1,27,28,12,0,3,4,0,5,8,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,7,0,1,9,0,0,3,6,4,0,0,9,7,17,9,15,17,3,21,0,0,1,0,6,10,0,4,16,84,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.13022789717604355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21343974764039556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879874521437535,0.0,0.15181857934504014,0.12538061742687087,0.0,0.1114251309297845,0.0,0.0,0.11355607522514975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654892317784956,0.0,0.0,0.2581925259220047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398724136155148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495260511550256,0.1906733365636561,0.2562657523361063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584267982203474,0.0,0.10673211291893296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131421315634082,0.0,0.0,0.15064874575867054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334060045391483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5215752234537522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14183617344722527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156574758553904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251738983027873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615333406237594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037905095395255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148781905726967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145240236398654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550933709893346,0.0,0.10594435083693032,0.07781573684769294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899209924121934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jackardian,2020/02/12,"Coping with burnout I'm at the end of a long stretch at work, which has been incredibly challenging.  I'm really deeply burned out and struggling to get much done at all.  I find I'm wasting a lot of time just chatting online and really fining it hard to even engage in simple everyday tasks.

I'd love to know what are some strategies for keeping on for the last few days till I have a break.  Mainly I just want to be sure that I don't let things totally fall apart.",4.781298245614035,5.169104831578949,5.366052631578949,84.79153508771931,69.10526315789474,8.85964912280702,27.41228070175439,8.841846274778883,1.8113859649122803,369,11,78,6,6,119,73,95,0.076,0.7959999999999999,0.128,0.6032,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,3,3,6,0,1,5,0,8,1,0,0,3,15,16,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,1,4,5,16,12,7,17,0,0,0,1,2,8,0,2,7,50,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635991615919704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25959723824491604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22468044297051826,0.0,0.0,0.16754971214403822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23185403201837684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325345332306848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272426572902569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254776822536528,0.0,0.0,0.13941295204497905,0.206778695133834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593995139480195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22449408027193035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21566511372685,0.22895127339650595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18648005401681986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250209496679497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651958201317246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390853530568184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685301638194158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791972689545993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496238795190357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18467816455647573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dhjskajjx,2020/02/12,What will happen if I stop taking my Lexapro and start taking a lot of stimulants I think it will be good,2.0536363636363646,3.9597834545454553,3.1818181818181834,91.8427272727273,78.0909090909091,6.218181818181819,20.090909090909093,7.1686216300943375,0.3473818181818187,84,2,18,1,2,27,19,22,0.1,0.769,0.131,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,6,8,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,5,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,13,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3401572609791769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3586277509247455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3447852853752957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28705135808335075,0.0,0.0,0.3390591177436401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6098483409446066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25986095243994994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Methyphobe,2020/02/12,"Phobia getting out of hand Hello, burner account as I find this a bit embarassing. For the past 5 years of my life I've been experiencing extreme anxiety around alcohol and other intoxicants, it has gotten so bad that 4 months ago I saw a post on Instagram where my girlfriend was doing Shisha and I went into a panic attack at work. believe me I know this isn't healthy, I went to a therapist for 2 months after that episode and I got to the point where I'm now able to sit with friends and family casually drinking around me and as long as I pretend they aren't drinking then it's okay. But my girlfriend has expressed to me that it really hurts her that I'll never be around her while she drinks and she dislikes my request for a dry wedding. I understand where she is coming from as honestly this whole fear is rediculous and logically I know it doesn't make sense to get upset about it but I still do. My girlfriend has asked me to please seek help for this as it severely negativly impacts our relationship and I plan on going as soon as I find an adorable options, I kind of Just needed to get that off my chest and I would really appreciate some advice and support.

Thanks in advance :)",4.218373522458632,5.802629251063831,5.268475177304968,80.54361111111113,71.38297872340425,8.286052009456265,29.225768321512998,8.841846274778883,2.354782505910166,954,38,182,18,18,314,144,235,0.102,0.753,0.145,0.9357,0,0,4,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,1,3,12,14,1,3,8,1,14,7,2,1,1,32,33,22,0,2,3,0,1,0,4,1,2,0,0,0,16,17,4,0,6,5,1,5,4,6,0,0,7,3,31,8,35,24,3,34,0,1,1,0,18,14,0,2,13,129,47,1,0.12324149705539995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043016457905115,0.10924615117318533,0.13170768021965762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942794079205696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32913318328199104,0.11521416336759245,0.14020499462070102,0.0,0.0,0.10290150224048793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885096423685214,0.0,0.0,0.1345477955166066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061616371653064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621892457590275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161811152114755,0.1386809473630246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252809912013305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521607491125046,0.0,0.19316578681871588,0.0,0.07004098287799795,0.0,0.09856748352021732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826061776569708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193257153907534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283370542706749,0.1354606074761171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704911405429826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906484671028492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226465627038775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19674037431430846,0.0,0.0,0.09138200847924008,0.095051440126421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14459734293057627,0.0,0.0,0.11764795400544233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528215503984908,0.11650304988957046,0.0,0.11803128708273952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579033175851562,0.0,0.0,0.1323152459947594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392278123751394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984208187459741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985299038065285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346421247128917,0.0,0.14309287691887504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282987447795036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22849220494815944,0.0,0.13759473025476288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972127765547698,0.0,0.0,0.08754722353686346,0.0,0.0,0.07936348347247776
mentalhealth,EnHeligSkit,2020/02/12,"I talked for the 1st time with someone about how I feel...  ... and in the days after I feel worse than ever. I always thought you need to talk things out to feel better. Could it be because I maybe finally accepted that something is wrong with me? My mindset was always that I couldn't suffer under mental health problems, because you know. Any advice what I should do?",3.7816190476190457,5.8545304000000025,3.962857142857143,87.43047619047621,73.57142857142857,5.80952380952381,24.523809523809533,6.42735559955562,0.8202380952380954,288,9,53,2,6,89,54,70,0.125,0.769,0.106,-0.3421,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,1,3,5,0,0,2,0,7,1,0,1,1,17,13,2,0,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,3,11,2,11,7,0,8,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,39,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982717303675219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3376584462524313,0.0,0.0,0.13797909597554395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24737216133703924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17944874129195004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199930218010195,0.0,0.0,0.13085384560125413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18353485012355789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077773177435997,0.0,0.0,0.22226725501078992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21567342804648731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150864542452583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20384052583671045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044756822701642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15044792979374708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194148092268952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191668380397454,0.1562024892927926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261669953483925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479787928608966,0.0,0.0,0.16108009723250402,0.1183127402133838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067726413926899,0.0,0.22183952048028505,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hugh_____Mungus,2020/02/12,"I finally talked to someone about how I feel And in the days after I feel worse than ever. I always thought you need to talk things out to feel better. Could it be because I maybe finally accepted that something is wrong with me? My mindset was always that I couldn't suffer under mental health problems, because you know. Any advice what I should do?",3.8369154228855713,6.122100477611941,4.263507462686569,84.38441542288558,74.07462686567162,6.257711442786071,26.092039800995025,7.1686216300943375,1.4028129353233836,280,10,49,3,6,88,51,67,0.132,0.7559999999999999,0.11199999999999999,-0.3421,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,1,1,16,13,2,0,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,3,11,2,10,7,0,8,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,37,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18617184581394453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31705223975682306,0.0,0.0,0.12955867653896386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322758357620374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849756308367714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15211300699063696,0.0,0.0,0.12286825722598785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233430986531365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889946601957778,0.0,0.0,0.417406001880899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20251157397985112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470363225466263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914007956472738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19199719053109054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126657762390066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18229986005552892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614251627837762,0.14666995490717555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062620750575005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657159924906464,0.0,0.0,0.1512498981578326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19415397364286915,0.0,0.20830136966949195,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whatstrueisfake,2020/02/12,"What could it be? When jt gets dark out or all the lights are off i get very scared. Like to the point where i know it isnt normal. I would also sometime ""see"" things that isnt there. Like with my brain. I would invision a thing behind me and then be scared to turn around. Or sometimes i would see stuff in the edge of my eyes.

I have been dealing with this for most of my life and it only seem to be getting worse.

I think it is important to point out, my parents let me watch horror movies since i was around 8ish. So if that could be the cause ok.",0.5137179487179502,2.472781162393165,1.4244658119658131,102.21567307692308,83.52991452991455,4.583760683760684,15.732905982905985,5.46131890053228,-1.0726632478632476,424,7,105,2,12,131,77,117,0.10800000000000001,0.797,0.094,-0.5760000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,2,5,1,17,3,2,1,1,23,26,9,0,7,3,1,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,11,8,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,5,14,3,16,14,2,11,0,0,4,0,2,9,0,5,4,76,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024089332596327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26770022750676314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784877284584024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445864090105352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400965677191301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15501205109850105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356668715180377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263258753940049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15375080098061547,0.10620199733841093,0.1469142263755627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731849334150046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435370632914567,0.0,0.0,0.16695428636619356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842730044689749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010683126152812,0.0,0.239631030706534,0.13687988346275975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12437733453874833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974149600539994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17212344337005053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19978177508707204,0.09634305881779236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635458584274499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240607408539266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532272078598534,0.32042910839670324,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThePerfectGhost,2020/02/12,Scaring yourself? Yo anyone scare themselves a little. It seems like every month or so the subject of suicide some how pops up in one way or another and then i start thinking about it and how i would do it and then i catch myself thinking of it and tell myself to stop and i end up hyperfixating on it. Does that happen to anyone else is it common. Is it something i should be concerned about.,1.2496153846153817,3.8499762692307726,2.731487179487182,89.37184615384619,87.58974358974359,4.1456410256410265,21.902564102564106,5.6839178017228535,0.2809548717948718,311,11,59,2,10,101,53,78,0.156,0.8170000000000001,0.027000000000000003,-0.8901,0,0,1,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,2,2,0,6,0,0,2,0,16,11,12,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,7,1,10,8,1,14,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,4,8,47,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22586749010554566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30122778921341703,0.22070452247630365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18849950129826387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799405016676386,0.0,0.1907819939171714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18148524369002295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904790342284672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523440257641392,0.2158891167244882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17193160201064053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459617836430563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4313094081408601,0.0,0.0,0.1960936407085581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582677164314666,0.0,0.0,0.15246244977054224,0.0,0.0,0.1800854873267098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356145262655153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882706020492758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760414559487784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709758633470204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301520541207875,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vvpurplepanthervv,2020/02/12,"Self-esteem in the workplace Hey there

So I work in retail and as is often the case, there’s a lot of gossip and complaining going on behind the scenes. Most of the people I work closely with have shared their distaste for how another co-worker behaves or conducts their business. It almost seems like a bonding/coping mechanism.

Unfortunately, I get very sensitive to the critique about my own performance and identity that I hear through the grape vine. 

I consider myself a pretty amiable person and I generally get along well with people in my life outside of work, so I feel confused and hurt when I hear that somebody I’ve given the benefit of the doubt before is not doing the same for me

How do I stop caring about what my co-workers think about me? How do I rise above all the gossip-y BS and not let the anxious work environment pour into my home life?


P.S I’ve been diagnosed with Major Depressive and Generalized Anxiety",5.410253496503497,7.069955147727272,6.183181818181822,74.84573426573431,68.54545454545455,8.824475524475526,30.58391608391609,9.265573868473778,2.9075512237762235,750,30,126,15,13,246,114,176,0.11900000000000001,0.78,0.1,-0.3349,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,5,13,11,0,2,14,0,8,3,0,3,1,33,18,15,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,1,1,4,13,0,1,3,0,1,2,2,6,1,0,2,3,19,5,22,15,6,10,0,2,0,0,9,6,0,8,3,92,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495401015277953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15179115786868533,0.11073930830778468,0.16353509191125398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231782120105396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759020807838366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246796669815065,0.14692610332379574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319388492131676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512599346476984,0.0,0.0822691844187392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3263050858007849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14520385987509832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15496620139801415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802464146883176,0.2044934072411643,0.07072134111566432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306789111080953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20071364101974284,0.12639691315513815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14727070738123407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178204955449313,0.15101393889422607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102398899414073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927549427291263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944033181053428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015463225343255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.632312343524411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,neeeeeeeptune,2020/02/12,"Drunk father Sorry for the long post.

I dont have many memories of my father when I was young. I only remember him coming home drunk and beating my mom. I woke up once when I was 5-6 yo
To him beating my mom on the kitchen using whatever he had in his hands. Or being at my aunt's house and him smashing on the door from the outside wanting to come in. I never asked my mom why and as I grew up I tried to supress everything. My father still gets drunk but he hadn't beaten my mom in a long time, but about a year ago. The same shit happened again. I'm 19 so I was somewhat able to put my mom and little brother in a my room and lock it. He still tried to get in but didnt and then I went into my room. My father isnt always like that. But after this event last year I cant shake off these feelings. I have violent urges. Trust I'm fucked up in many ways and I won't get into my whole fucked up childhood. But something broke in me. I don't feel me. I dont know who I am. I dont know what to do.",0.058268204142645885,1.6101062511210813,2.3621909032671367,97.04052316890885,82.90134529147983,5.144480034166133,18.690796497971387,5.916634753146586,-0.4048315609651931,766,18,190,5,21,261,121,223,0.175,0.784,0.040999999999999995,-0.9832,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,7,9,5,1,8,0,18,8,2,1,1,27,37,18,0,1,6,11,3,1,0,1,0,0,5,0,6,11,4,0,5,3,0,6,10,7,0,0,8,3,35,2,29,27,3,46,0,1,0,2,20,20,3,2,19,120,41,1,0.10335392708298287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161702033994557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859987468435153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662197006798914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17806051319972022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633900984041174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288784536249534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451770194239554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19109808033044876,0.16199448337449265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139553638789584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367241582835407,0.0,0.0,0.11925655528988678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11360123077221032,0.0842472450375216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05049350816423717,0.1035877869880275,0.0,0.18292994622005174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20956932004367576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6052343512994831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971292013389397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110068559236098,0.0,0.07860531885293237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098984492481265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389924326460688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707985174104345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609132091484093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956690248450167,0.0,0.11569625965875943,0.0,0.0,0.16507715935236078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060266506032352035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140341064318784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926460884635097,0.0,0.0,0.06096082400145809,0.08203753658915358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581012586461156,0.09326084351739693,0.11539096860662773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311308089967056
mentalhealth,Aidamis,2020/02/12,"Could anyone here please help me with a little prioritization?   

Hello! I'm Aidamis, currently a student abroad, several months after a good Samaritan convinced me to get over my fears and follow through on this project I had started myself.

edit: feel to scroll down to the ""therefore"" actual checklist paragraph if the wall of text intimidates you :) thanks

However, my trip is having the same effect as Steve Jobs' trip to India. Lot of new experiences but no ""Woaouh"" factor, no magical ""falling in love with xyz"", no sudden inspiration surge to fix my nonexistent work ethic, find my passion, or face my demons.

I have discovered self-help three and a half years ago after a lightbulb lit up and I faced my wrong university choices, poor life hygiene and low self-respect (like Jordan Peterson I'm a bit wary of the idea of self-esteem). However, after somehow defeating my own dictator who keeps coming back once in a while, I'm still wandering through the desert and still have no clue on how my life relates to my future or any contribution to society worth a damn (pardon my language).

Quora recommended ""medication and meditation"" to folks with symptoms similar to mine, and I'm taking neither since I think I'm deeply depressed, just apathetic, zen in a bad way. Meanwhile I put off meditation because (I think that) I'm aware enough that 99% of my problems are still stuck at the wall of accepting mortality, normality and ultimate lack of control. I still cannot let myself go.

All in all, that leaves me with one mess of a privilege life I'm ungrateful for, all because while being lazy I'm also a perfectionist with unattainable standards and I stubbornly hold the belief that I have a moral obligation to save the world, or at least contribute to the betterment of the lives of many. Actions-wise this is why I still haven't abandoned creative writing completely, though I've yet to be published. But here too I can't get sh done because while I'm imagining my characters completing their arcs and finding solace I (think I have) no desire for solace myself, maybe because complaining is so much easier.

Still, as the song ""to say goodbye"" by Uma2rman goes: ""a late epiphany is wandering my barren room"". I know I have the tools somewhere but I know I don't want to feel pain.

So, I've compiled this random list of stuff I need to fix/actions that might be helpful which I am writing in real time, from the top of my head. Problem is, to me getting homework done and playing a videogame is one and the same thing, and love and even self-love is worth pursuing as much as a billion dollar, which is not much. Finally, I have trouble quantifying my goals and breaking them down. I might be in need of some cognitive therapy but where I live the cost is prohibitive and I'd rather take some advice on which books to read to ""self-medicate"".

​

Therefore, what I might be in need of but don't know what to prioritize/how much time-wise is:

\-become even more mindful

\-set a schedule

\-find time for my hobbies and my foreign language studies

\-find time to check on universities for my MD (I graduate this year)

\-get some progress insofar as to finding my life purpose

\-go to the gym/exercise

\-get rid of some annoying addictions, the least of which are YouTube, daydreaming and videogames

\-procrastinate less

\-learn to reward myself without becoming a dog (I heard from a self-help specialist that traditional carrot and stick schemes are outdated and stupid)

\-become self-grounded at long last, whatever that means

\-find true happiness edit - pick up meditation and stick to 20 min/day? if not 20 how much?

Please, if you could give some tips on which things to do first, I will be very grateful. 

​

Thank you very much for taking the time to read my post and think of an answer. I hope you all have a good day!",6.065544554455446,7.605503165487978,6.097442998585574,76.53183917963226,66.85007072135785,9.446664780763793,33.80053748231966,9.74208191438628,3.3984442093352207,3066,139,535,67,50,969,361,707,0.122,0.7390000000000001,0.139,0.9503,4,0,0,0,0,0,132.0,0,4,2,10,23,36,4,1,38,0,44,14,3,7,5,114,89,47,1,16,16,0,2,1,0,4,8,3,2,0,22,28,0,5,24,5,6,8,14,17,0,6,5,6,62,19,88,71,27,75,4,4,1,3,18,29,1,18,35,352,84,15,0.0,0.0,0.05400592760757339,0.060331081485349825,0.0,0.054079680845032035,0.04905745175757803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04425707474975039,0.0,0.11992633153692416,0.13449347078842447,0.0376345405359198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038696498279264704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04255467554201346,0.0462083599992684,0.13494417494874722,0.18336307631016655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048945609336857036,0.06041926344096711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04767233754062762,0.1160503234036344,0.0,0.06207089535187185,0.08837236193761387,0.0,0.0,0.07138218034758324,0.0,0.04766608834902651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326840979998415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718320562463279,0.0,0.07310589891212746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05413521436863361,0.0,0.0622752729674809,0.05596527917876876,0.0,0.0,0.06062458924932971,0.3034901799031423,0.047073980468627326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14456987220006393,0.05308920598838277,0.06290440627319993,0.09283669202923048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058912717659933625,0.0,0.0,0.056796983093413925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14837863052440228,0.0,0.0,0.054967214070567205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06247451916248217,0.0,0.0,0.05491851638361706,0.049190620606992384,0.0,0.0,0.09124374833732736,0.045111215621308286,0.06242832384011428,0.0585993161363129,0.0,0.05659106900833216,0.1563591089443094,0.02703736523679449,0.05546734486652754,0.09773621479751736,0.048976036212529946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047049892838471725,0.09989685111687244,0.0,0.0,0.05610822514071933,0.05559859976053624,0.060283794658573524,0.06147262124934717,0.05575136535247937,0.0,0.17612773652503114,0.05587976667778671,0.0,0.04417355356707997,0.0,0.2440969632886377,0.12310644606712502,0.0,0.0534497660215906,0.0,0.0,0.05422352904648264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058937553466762375,0.07500250789385479,0.0,0.05888791942620066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149806145587222,0.0,0.0,0.0530024546381235,0.0,0.0,0.1059098727500351,0.0,0.055634117931250594,0.0,0.0,0.1107141961802724,0.06299145045658294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04401027646665888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4041373183996442,0.06252084504175194,0.0,0.04577957498148017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03917143860202316,0.0,0.26517773939245554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633534888896895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057521654593295814,0.12483116437784365,0.0,0.0,0.10190318047356718,0.06328853930745162,0.0,0.07353369314794662,0.14184398794043065,0.05437335360852747,0.0,0.16135218114001654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132609263966736,0.03264221725894554,0.04392800026239465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04993765694135924,0.0,0.0,0.053347830455676176,0.0,0.040289723738040316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060507922355601464,0.13449347078842447,0.07127702385766163
mentalhealth,ThrowawayT0,2020/02/12,"My adult brother is kinda aggro and erratic, and it’s hard to deal with. So basically we live together and I’m kinda high and I thought that would’ve helped me mellow (experienced smoker) and I’m kinda overthinking stuff.",2.1435714285714305,5.031806690476195,4.27809523809524,76.85857142857147,89.23809523809523,7.561904761904763,23.66666666666667,8.344100000000001,2.4249238095238104,179,7,30,5,6,61,33,42,0.037000000000000005,0.963,0.0,-0.1027,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,11,4,6,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,3,0,16,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3996073554879279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472210922021641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25980581479831866,0.4095296735469151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3422654169408371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44371901110369305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077178618124409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27534596551334284,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shaggy-powerful-meme,2020/02/12,"Am I too dramatic? My friends think I'm too dramatic. I've always been like this, since I was a kid. I feel like I'm trying to be the center of attention between my friends. Because I have issues when socializing, it feels nice when people actually want to talk to you or be seen by them. I also feel like I like to test people, see their limits. I hate when they ghost me, makes me feel hopeless. It makes me feel what I do when I ghost my dad. He got mad when I was little when I didn't call him. It wasn't anything violent, but made me not like him. My parents are not together since I was 5 so I had to call him. But the point is why am I like this. Am I a bad person, am I too dramatic, am I too much of an attention whore, do I not care that much or something. 

I can't believe I''m telling Reddit this but I'm too confused and my parents, friends and others I care about would understand.",0.6499473684210528,2.5626645210526315,2.7805263157894764,92.93868421052632,82.73684210526315,6.105263157894738,22.105263157894736,7.273561745256523,0.6489999999999991,689,23,159,10,19,233,98,190,0.155,0.7070000000000001,0.138,-0.8132,2,0,1,0,0,1,23.0,0,1,3,1,14,19,3,1,5,0,21,1,0,3,0,26,41,15,2,2,8,3,5,6,3,1,0,0,0,2,9,2,0,1,9,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,10,7,36,12,10,28,2,9,0,1,2,1,21,3,0,3,12,106,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.12282965325534305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065712017962494,0.1047328064300932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357918067711523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509507173824148,0.07672836553342803,0.0,0.0,0.1418108747653866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570519451775945,0.0,0.2566629706975469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182148766065566,0.17984118858567855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917374383916728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066866397543522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12426924092367506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137417705499596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689584100217721,0.12615346201357908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909996740145296,0.16803661295542194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18505589225494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795244979045207,0.0,0.0,0.17452295797390815,0.10990365702367026,0.0,0.0,0.1189865659808688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003010240085546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082397088709073,0.0,0.0,0.1283072456286273,0.0,0.09689984217229072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116845933174202,0.11001475481604447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065155357425495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545655642074501,0.0,0.0,0.13103371178212966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424059552380696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135768860607677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941348316361472,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DannySmoker,2020/02/12,"bipolar disorder I’m 14 years old and i have been suffering from depression and have been cutting ever since i was 10. I always just thought i was depressed, but i started doing research and i found that my symptoms are more similar to bipolar disorder. Its not consistent feelings of sadness and loneliness, rather huge mood swings between happy excited and hyperactive to extremely depressed and lonely, to the point of cutting. I have been telling my parents and asking for help but they just think im a stupid teen and never listen to me, they made fun of me when i confessed about cutting. Can anyone give advice? What should i do? Should i talk to someone at school? i have been telling a few of my close friends about this, but theyre just kids like me and cant really help me. It really ruins my
life, im barely passing school and i get in constant arguments with my parents, and hurt the people around me.",4.650363336085881,6.649769184971099,5.0535631709331135,80.84047687861275,71.02312138728323,7.948637489677952,32.010322047894306,8.634040054169528,2.774755904211396,731,34,128,13,14,232,106,173,0.23800000000000002,0.619,0.14300000000000002,-0.9507,2,2,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,0,9,18,4,0,4,0,17,4,0,1,2,32,28,15,0,3,8,2,1,1,1,2,4,1,0,1,5,14,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,12,0,0,9,2,24,5,18,17,2,14,1,8,0,0,15,6,0,0,8,92,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394318095732416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405318923762918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958425048085408,0.0,0.0,0.12202132713592165,0.12814191184354298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812393445565472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.354174473526759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3141881043968894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398762847586448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930669152661627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029013896423035,0.1058999130032098,0.0,0.07161339804707538,0.13148999797094488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459135238764474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18375021309279496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673622979418766,0.0,0.2961181616262137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681656814722826,0.06696546000148801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296989127212992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057168051676159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383186798398795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043999444179624,0.0,0.0,0.09502705327291608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957541948052234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756210556964518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27744423971232063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133856894138288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613893440913255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701882494581117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246817417862578,0.0,0.11017164373175,0.2396103776392337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782889732123357,0.0,0.10881823935385833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826856182846086
mentalhealth,LifeFromAnother,2020/02/12,"I wrote this, what is it saying about my mental health? Life is the most beautiful thing to experience and comprehend. Cherish every moment. “Nostalgia” My understanding of life is so incredibly amazing. I can only tell you about it but I cannot explain it to anyone that is for you to understand. Help one another, be positive. Don’t have excessive  hate or anger. Don’t hold grudges. Forgive yourself and forgive others. Have the motives to learn about things and different point of views learn about the entire galaxy/universe and why you exist and why the world is simulated (Virtual) but not in the way you might think it is or is it. It’s a mystery and a gift for everyone. Pain, sadness and suffering is apart of everything. 
Don’t compare yourself to others don’t inspire to be someone else. Be you. Music is a gate way. Consciousness is a gateway. Think outside the box but so much is inside the box to. Do not fall to far into a rabbit hole. My journey was not your journey. Yes you. The depressed, confused, angry, positive, kind hearted, loving, amazing person in the entire world. What is real and what is consciousness. Can you ‘’see’’ it? Learn! Crazy? Or just jumbled?
Resonance",2.2422133027522904,5.1556514036697285,3.5760493119266066,81.55792717889909,90.00917431192661,6.394724770642202,26.995986238532108,7.645422480735847,2.3320775229357804,938,44,155,20,32,305,119,218,0.14800000000000002,0.6609999999999999,0.191,0.9101,1,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,8,0,1,7,15,2,1,14,1,28,6,1,1,0,39,36,16,0,0,10,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,1,16,9,0,1,14,0,0,3,8,7,0,1,2,2,14,8,20,30,2,14,0,3,1,1,17,8,0,6,1,115,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698625515672416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135046581157487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716076071730382,0.0,0.0,0.1663811048071707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303194058808687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341739849140793,0.15216905577168716,0.14312255575913355,0.15577588683229446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722522363022715,0.0,0.16927403083226758,0.0,0.18871059836719856,0.10674111586363484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658331225103927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22496427828149296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437282622408988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16048533775606416,0.16893781415625303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170661936437847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791111033801463,0.12111589074533208,0.16945195432051718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13904991231047525,0.0,0.0,0.1505415926441922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812600018706533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664103996419224,0.0,0.0,0.12690067801871796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13493099404226375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919047304071733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115956572033488,0.2040804056190492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315672403712113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528085748787072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873945503714264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,za01,2020/02/12,"Is it possible to get used to a certain feeling so much, you don’t wanna change it and keep it how it is? Sorry if it’s a dumb question but I’m genuinely curious. 

My social life is non-existent. I think the last time I hung out with people outside of school was about 7-8 months ago. I have a friend group in college but I only see them in college. 

I’m at the point where I don’t even desire social interaction anymore. I’m so used to staying in my room for long periods of time, not socializing with anyone or having human contact that I’m kind of used to it. I wouldn’t even mind living in complete isolation. 

Some days I dread going to class because I have to be around people and I miss being at home in my room. 

Is it possible to get used to a feeling so much, you don’t wanna change?",1.2467739520958077,3.1586647964071872,3.6015830838323346,87.83135666167665,80.67664670658681,6.330688622754493,23.0123502994012,7.413659706084162,0.9788326347305388,619,21,131,9,16,214,96,167,0.079,0.823,0.098,0.4515,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,0,9,6,1,1,6,0,14,1,0,5,1,28,31,10,0,5,5,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,3,1,8,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,1,3,15,3,26,27,3,23,0,1,1,0,12,13,1,4,8,86,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400485376857912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754639213685345,0.0899269829481548,0.0,0.0,0.1144900149112694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839935820543835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721042926108899,0.0,0.1348449590778422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829427002489126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698911585600281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300579879367186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936363505810712,0.0,0.13438665522992227,0.0,0.07309192978483299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12900614495529072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431432551364724,0.0,0.13392734616365795,0.0,0.10483417617458406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084092585296047,0.0,0.0,0.11356483548051607,0.11381565178243515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298592650145004,0.0,0.10265513870837216,0.0,0.18908604508982105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781357053536344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783237242465184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157785902405348,0.28997651702415844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407244251668766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016001336523025,0.10248538275187236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3933045741477231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439681744181058,0.0,0.13708096591205604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240798555442158,0.0,0.0,0.14998685139219334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44431039736840705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yespalemon,2020/02/12,"Did anyone else go from a non conformist, confident, insouciant towards most things not related to improving ones self, to pretty insecure, complacent, and all around just self loathing. People say ignorance is bliss and I could not agree more. When I was in high school sure I was scared to ask out my crush but what pubescent teen isn’t. Something I wasn’t was scared to express my opinion, worried about what other people think about me, scared if every single little decision I make is the right one or not, scared if I’ll ever find the joys of life everyone seeks; from love to passions, and even just simple hobbies. I was extremely determined and optimistic, with a dash of realist in there. I’ve been in college 3 years now and everything’s changed. I feel like I’ll never find my niche, I feel like I’m lost, I feel like I’ll  ever find love like the type I felt with the girl I had coming into college. I resent the world and it’s injustice towards those less fortunate than I. I have nothing to be upset about having come from a lower middle class family and yet I’m so unhappy. I hate my self, but nothing specific; I just hate my existence. Might it be the onset of depression or just a sense of disassociation. I used to not fear death and accepted it as a reality of life, now it’s a constant reminder that no matter what I do and how I do it; it will never be enough. Sorry for the rant, I just wanted to vent. Maybe even find out what is wrong with me and potential steps to get out of this slump.",4.5684595717481615,5.712514510067116,5.466433365292428,81.14576062639824,70.00671140939598,9.166123362096515,28.28443592201981,9.48565724429506,2.4461711089805047,1196,42,234,26,21,392,168,298,0.20199999999999999,0.609,0.18899999999999997,-0.5446,1,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,1,20,24,3,7,13,0,22,5,0,3,6,62,42,20,1,4,15,0,4,4,0,2,2,1,0,4,15,20,0,1,11,0,0,4,9,14,0,2,10,5,27,10,37,26,6,29,0,2,0,3,9,15,0,7,14,161,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720601693653061,0.09848143104089614,0.0,0.08556294928326955,0.08985478327011683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167718908268668,0.16558955288603971,0.0,0.10386643867059264,0.0,0.0767402054087534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08278392317992736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080291957353744,0.0,0.0,0.09931274550889954,0.0,0.1269664310447806,0.17388349096082184,0.08098124275327521,0.0918422394093372,0.08638218831185178,0.0,0.09060890277960408,0.10815637682705367,0.1457962736008629,0.20599425940856314,0.09228571198544903,0.0,0.35139038548044504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050216250625425736,0.0,0.054624511019959514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189787819298812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155103772966656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577808575928552,0.18782822289600745,0.09633272994424208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492114830362312,0.0,0.1734955297405835,0.0,0.0641576750974832,0.0,0.09656068645250518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196309029023737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482600107909027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18445034743937305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13026036049617604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13326842332524444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778376235404934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208189753601429,0.0,0.07643470383945743,0.38491252701606377,0.09727376340120177,0.0,0.0,0.300807500192606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07399421449581928,0.0,0.107593152256012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09058748476574356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385470064296023,0.06158677063667092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830127151820301,0.0,0.0,0.0566912641582899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976097009698947,0.0,0.0,0.1050869364271092,0.0,0.06189506913510996
mentalhealth,kruziikrell,2020/02/12,"Why do I hate talk therapy so much? I understand that talk therapy can be a very beneficial thing for a lot of people and I am not trying to say that it is bad. I have seen many therapists and I just can’t seem to make any progress. It’s not that I’m uncomfortable talking about my problems, I am very open with the therapist and share whatever is on my mind and try my best to use their advice. I just don’t think it’s for everyone and it’s become something I dread going to every week. Are there any alternative treatments for someone struggling with depression/anxiety? I understand that talk therapy can be helpful but I honestly hate it.",3.9825196850393714,5.6666811496062985,5.437015748031494,78.70198031496064,72.14960629921259,9.804409448818898,30.81023622047244,10.125756701596842,3.3337155905511815,514,23,99,15,10,173,79,127,0.122,0.7509999999999999,0.127,-0.2666,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,2,5,9,2,2,3,0,13,0,0,2,0,22,24,7,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,1,2,14,3,12,21,3,4,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,2,1,67,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249361123779542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388834816395862,0.0,0.09780691360891997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675160739599478,0.0,0.1412031872839651,0.0,0.0,0.1341734495090206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772135678356652,0.12216866897630832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266159718783691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524560095743348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569692427921671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10869573575854416,0.0,0.0,0.08534262471911266,0.12962250168590675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909471173314366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398639550633897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863691695087889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12233770204515505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167354467529993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639223445534785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083291202813697,0.09842720250550277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365933085411952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110524108433517,0.0,0.0,0.4386318818232477,0.2968935202191217,0.0849396076968695,0.08192280418704975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17360708945825007,0.0,0.0,0.2661981979639476,0.0,0.11042362410935457,0.0,0.21098362258765244,0.0,0.0,0.1025556695192214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536711426599555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Igo04,2020/02/12,"I might be put into a psychiatric hospital soon, and I’m scared I know there’s countless horror stories on the internet and probably a bunch of posts like this, but I’d like to hear some actual experiences from people.",3.6692857142857136,6.160731880952383,5.362142857142857,75.32035714285716,75.42857142857143,9.914285714285716,27.16666666666667,10.125756701596842,3.3929809523809524,177,7,31,6,4,60,36,42,0.107,0.769,0.124,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,5,3,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,20,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.30653312823139106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072669490740709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3540329749349968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263062808360166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30692364754446155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3332287672669041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21776935307602746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008374995838057,0.0,0.3386715281538724,0.0,0.0,0.3157746003323696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31448616974546695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,griffinhimself,2020/02/12,"I want nothing more than to cease to exist. My life is not that horrible! I'm a successful guy, built myself up, started from scratch... Had my first job when I was 17. Now am 27, I have my own multinational company... I have over a 100 people working with me. 

Am single. Yea sure, i have been through a few bad terrible break ups, but nothing to kill myself over. I live in Egypt, it wasn't easy growing up here. And it isn't easy getting over the 2011 revolution, *if anyone is in the loop.*

I have been diagnosed with **depression** and **adjustment disorder.** 

Yes! life is hard, but that's not the reason why I want to die. I am not suicidal, I just want to cease to exist. Want everything to end, want peace. **AGAIN** I am not suicidal. 

I am not sure what to do or how to make it stop, I just want my brain to shut the hell up. It keeps telling me: you need to die. Not sure if that is some kind of a disorder or what the hell is going on in my head! 

I would appreciate it if anyone could tell me if that's a known symptom of some disorder?",-0.7208761682242972,1.4534459018691628,1.6854147196261695,94.89017815420559,96.99065420560748,5.665654205607478,18.837032710280376,7.1686216300943375,0.4999257009345799,789,26,181,16,32,266,112,214,0.192,0.625,0.184,-0.8421,1,1,0,0,0,2,50.0,0,1,0,3,7,11,3,0,10,2,23,6,2,3,3,41,36,12,5,13,16,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,11,4,0,2,3,0,0,2,8,6,0,1,5,2,25,5,29,29,6,22,2,1,0,0,4,12,2,8,7,128,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284089645721925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722599073170914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12999016756310075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929711684511388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029316478906967,0.11818834818234672,0.2417012606213179,0.0,0.4003652086179456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103134943155451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465248220202314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990473236622092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060837255660362466,0.0,0.06617788665729141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529800320202505,0.0,0.0,0.10431107501955364,0.0,0.1195052789563779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555283859884463,0.10350089947572652,0.12882818523660905,0.12125865004277828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16449587560863896,0.0,0.0,0.10282230655022387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07772736582017492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634185231507495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22346258042073167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072770308727692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972396684014693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241975968262702,0.0,0.0,0.09735251276714027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547419730138935,0.0,0.3292416639046519,0.1210300442701039,0.0,0.0,0.2035546168851204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4120906146936513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507272214423398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477271876344128,0.0,0.0,0.08271857415928814,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Time_and_Nature,2020/02/12,"I’m afraid of getting old and I feel like the only solution is suicide I don’t know where this type of post belongs, and the only place I can think of is here. Before I start, I should say that I don’t want to mislead anyone. I have several factors in my life aside from my weird fear of getting old that led me to believe this is the only solution - the fear is just the icing on the cake. 

Basically, I’m an 18 year old in the US. To some people I’m a kid, to some I’m an adult. depends on how old the person is I’m interacting with. But regardless, everyone can agree 18 is young. I have pride in being young and youthful. It makes me happy. Having that teenage spirit with all of its brashness and arrogance is... comforting, I guess. And I’m just not really ready to give it up. I don’t think I’ll be at a point where I’m able to take my life while I’m 18, but when I’m 19 I surely will. It just has to be before I’m 20. 

I guess my reason in posting this is to ask am I literally just crazy? Like obviously everyone here is going to say suicide isn’t the answer, but I’m just like... never going to be happy aging. Never. My life will be an endless downward spiral until I eventually succumb to old age, alone and uncared for. I just don’t know what to do at this point.",0.6634708605664521,2.5550661286764718,3.3491830065359487,88.99363834422657,82.56617647058823,6.235511982570808,21.103485838779964,7.3871296695380915,0.6861866557734211,985,30,218,15,27,346,127,272,0.08900000000000001,0.8029999999999999,0.10800000000000001,0.2469,0,1,0,0,0,2,34.0,1,0,0,1,12,12,0,3,14,0,30,3,0,5,5,41,58,13,2,3,10,0,1,3,0,3,3,2,0,3,12,8,0,0,7,0,0,3,8,4,0,0,0,3,23,8,31,50,3,37,1,0,0,0,9,15,0,5,20,138,35,1,0.10069519674655804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428985574701384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040842284513445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941364161056454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713683917592772,0.11344900456697678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19243715137838385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266201825419477,0.0509145170271932,0.07193666867559273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521816851819353,0.09659600816504486,0.11445480166557714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22185422338639027,0.0,0.0,0.2143838187125724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067889345002258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21337198611854416,0.14758376045855004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721482573934462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15532468678583405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5283133511510509,0.0,0.0,0.22974970387531166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980937071638768,0.08792316180429581,0.10520504872002223,0.0,0.1903790169788488,0.0,0.19287632751983305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450792148371935,0.10353143301679743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16015372412424236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375691057538355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127257853254712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202884034979271,0.0,0.09490403125492687,0.0,0.07571025628155545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904283236270858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112392341354525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05939263596370701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484440528307588
mentalhealth,EnviroHope23,2020/02/12,"I just want release I apologize, I cannot sleep. I am not clear headed.

I do not wish to live the life I am in, I do not know how to get out of it.

I have two autoimmune diseases, scoliosis, endometriosis, required leepz procedure, getting a biopsy for cancer in May.

I am tired all the time. There is no explanation for the random symptoms I get. I'm told o may have another condition, but they don't know .

I went to university, I work in my field full time. I make less than 35k a year with no medical benefits, on contract with no job security.

I will not have kids because of my health. I see that the world is on fire and based on the science we as a race seem to have little hope. Less so when you review the state of prejudism in the world.

Currently, my work place is incredibly toxic. I've been applying to jobs for months with almost no call back. I live with my family, very toxic; mental health, hoarding, etc. 

I'm trying. I'm budgeting my money, I almost never drink (one-two glasses every other months). I try to exercise despite chronic pain and fatigue. I'm looking into getting additional diplomas/accreditation in my field to move into a higher pay scale hopefully. I've booked a session with a therapist, but it always ends up being too costly. I'm trying to find an alternative doctor or specialist that can find the missing piece in my health.

But I'm so tired. Tired of trying and getting no where. I don't see a way out any time soon . I don't know I can continue living and working Ina toxic environment, but to move out I would have to sacrifice the money I spent on physio, therapy, meds that I need to maintain function.

I don't know how to get out, other than to keep puttering along and hope it gets better not worse.

How do you maintain hope when you see this economy, social issues and climate issues all at once? Seconds from extinction. I just want a little peace and stability.",3.527147799014095,5.385712943699733,5.2049935137939976,79.17614546397995,73.71849865951742,8.351777220444522,27.313759404998702,9.023248300946321,2.3672761221136382,1500,57,281,33,31,509,193,373,0.10800000000000001,0.787,0.105,0.4093,4,0,1,0,0,0,54.0,1,3,1,5,14,10,0,0,18,0,27,18,2,4,4,64,63,20,0,9,12,0,1,0,0,4,15,0,0,1,9,21,1,3,7,3,6,3,16,3,0,2,4,5,38,7,48,54,7,44,1,2,4,0,10,25,0,11,14,186,47,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628197357325997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764783163488462,0.0,0.0,0.05528655810202451,0.0852497843442752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251442181473754,0.0,0.04955951941085214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190294436724694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301604483596205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321364910567855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964271773871731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07200736958917647,0.0,0.0906706138199232,0.0,0.0,0.06849847173231073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766420859291318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486128365563059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973300254373372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343690825231935,0.2592532171583809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3229956344511074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16971144980288255,0.1613547397514746,0.07226287515500451,0.0,0.0,0.1787206724483482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574243556473053,0.0,0.16296723919355047,0.21536727329981326,0.0,0.06827124030830839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05426815574397923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903055968796011,0.08190085639241923,0.08193093749711364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978522926450128,0.17281734904745755,0.0,0.0602826692917714,0.06270331136516179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658148678662214,0.05509075508060817,0.0,0.08650857251084575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494084312784468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19435591433710375,0.07401215896044491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813583757286901,0.08287476718782165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450147799098433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297324893003826,0.09439517385162667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14221946026903273,0.2803260057099316,0.0,0.0776853111427234,0.0,0.2207885356230278,0.0,0.15883591310827935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708073560954983,0.09590529419872422,0.0645318875753155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536560125928242,0.0,0.0,0.09349059913711373,0.0,0.0,0.17756136681661036,0.0,0.08285130128908977,0.0577529473439454,0.0,0.0,0.05235431686863408
mentalhealth,sthena_nievez,2020/02/12,"I'm scared I'm gonna fail 8th grade:( I have been absent to school for like 20-30 days I lost the count of how many days I've been absent and I really do care about my grades but I just feel like a complete failure my grades are pretty bad and my mom keeps yelling at me telling me I'll repeat the grade,that makes me feel even worse I tried telling her that I think I might be deppresed because I been showing some symptoms but she doesn't ever understand and tells me to get over it I really wanna die my friends are also mad at me;(",3.082108695652174,3.768576286956524,3.8684239130434785,92.93133152173915,73.08695652173913,7.141304347826088,23.94021739130435,7.1686216300943375,0.6271086956521739,423,11,99,4,8,135,77,115,0.22699999999999998,0.6509999999999999,0.122,-0.9390000000000001,0,0,0,0,1,1,6.0,0,0,0,2,6,9,1,1,3,0,10,1,0,2,1,17,22,7,1,1,3,1,2,2,1,2,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,4,3,20,4,9,15,1,7,0,2,0,0,7,3,0,2,6,55,22,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962276678767713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577870562616133,0.10643088802616073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780102293647277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18305849778640804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251973854083688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18120101763126464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153176970272876,0.15793027781961472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765599549262696,0.12472999569184785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13489089909422386,0.0,0.09121816416855548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15518717827571601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17059562848904725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19058998653848835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11654285747793118,0.1770109226149729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18521665383991945,0.0,0.20448239446397748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17762487593835696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236987871940284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747990622686357,0.1766984593376104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18147002733311815,0.0,0.0,0.4578085810762153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118727918667542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11853787219740933,0.0,0.0,0.18175852188927746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17792621226246075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spread-all-day,2020/02/12,I feel dead. I swear to god death is calling me. Everyday. It gets closer. My fiancé left me. Can’t see my one year old daughter. She’s my only reason to live. Not the fiancé. The daughter. I am searching for answers. I am searching for meaning. I feel myself falling off the edge.,-0.9295238095238112,0.5384898571428565,1.4014285714285712,93.32690476190477,114.71428571428572,2.580952380952381,20.738095238095237,4.7782277997778095,-0.0588404761904755,216,9,41,1,12,72,40,56,0.193,0.7709999999999999,0.037000000000000005,-0.836,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,1,0,6,9,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,3,12,0,5,9,0,7,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,3,27,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273437500530594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3241855289882202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16748763227010566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3483065614293612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830743182235345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34920104299633103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363903916106431,0.0,0.21723046908552385,0.24381235331475504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296053300626707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554574197867928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20644031462964624
mentalhealth,le0naanais,2020/02/12,"how to stop emotionally shutting down when overwhelmed? i mean it’s getting ridiculous and getting in the way of school work. im just feeling all sorts of emotions right now, but that’s no surprise.",5.23153153153153,7.385524945945949,4.528108108108111,84.56531531531532,69.81081081081078,6.014414414414415,36.65765765765766,6.42735559955562,2.3903765765765765,161,9,28,1,3,48,33,37,0.161,0.708,0.131,-0.2846,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,9,4,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,5,4,1,8,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,1,3,17,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6395331536884499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437359426595733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29703969555085685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070614262665968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.309654420722818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427658531916489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876973958221924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23766325781443015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256410624414645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069526501416236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dorayi,2020/02/12,"Might be a bit of a heavy post and it's very long too. No one has to read it but I just wanted to get it off my chest. It's all just so frustrating. So when I was around 9, my mums brother stayed at our house while he was working or studying (not sure what is was but don't think it matters). Anyways he was in his early 20s most likely and he stayed in my room at the time. I slept in my mums room and often I'd go to my room to get something of mine.

One time I went to my room, he told me to come in then shut the door. He turned off the lights, had stripped and told me to suck him off. Obviously being a child I had no fucking idea as to what the heck was going on or what I was doing or what he was doing. I remember clearly telling him I don't like it and I was scared, with him telling me to do things to it. I don't remember how it ended but I guess I can say I'm glad I wasn't raped??

I'm now 22 and for a long, long time this incident has haunted me and messed with my mind. I ended up being exposed to porn since I was 11 and have struggled with trying to stop. I don't like it. I really hate it and I've never said this to anyone before. One of my closest friends is aware that something happened but I've never told her it exactly and repercussions of what I had done and had to deal with. I would never openly admit to being 'addicted' to porn or anything do that sort in real life since I'm a Muslim girl. I'm always encouraging my friends to be open about topics such as sex, periods or even little things like bras, things that are seen as taboo or embarrassing to talk about, when in actuality, they aren't. But I can't do it myself. Especially when it comes to things like porn. I don't think I'm addicted but I've had a weird relationship with porn.

Things started to really go downhill when I was around 12 and in year 7 (from the UK) and for a very, very long time I isolated myself within my four walls and never went out. For over four years I'd stay at home and never went anywhere. I only went to school and even then I had a serious attendance issue. I messed up my education and had nothing going for me for a very long time after turning 16. I spent so many years at home just in my room, which was my safe haven. I had issues with everyone in my family, particularly my brothers (two older and one younger, in which case the 2nd oldest was incredibly violent and so was the younger one) and it was like no one was on my side. I didn't talk to my 2nd oldest brother for four years since he's a piece of shit and still is but now he's more 'holier than thou'. I know I should let go of all of it but I can't seem to continue to feel so wronged by everything that's happened. I still continue to remember the shit that happened to me and how I was (and still am) treated like absolute filth in the family because I chose to stay in my room. Because I chose to stay isolated. But not a single person in my family thought to ask me what's going on. What could have made me be like this.

One instance where I dropped out from college at 17, my mum told her sisters and my nan when I was there. They all questioned it immediately and my nan was appalled (out of concern and because she's from another generation, it's difficult for her to understand certain things). But when one of my aunts sat down with me to talk, it was all 'little things'. These little things added up and I've been consistently feeling like absolute shit since I was 12. I've been cutting since I was 12 too and my arms are jacked up as well as my right thigh. It's all little things to them and so damn fucking insignificant but why can't I seem to let go of it all? It's like I need closure but I know it won't help.

The uncle that sexually assaulted (is it even sexual assault or harassment?? fuck I don't even know what happened to me, myself) has been staying away from me ever since. I remember having a emotional breakdown from being treated like shit once when staying at my nans (mums family's house) and he mocked me for having a breakdown. Other than that he stays the fuck away from me and I am so fucking glad. I have a feeling that he feels guilty in some way (fuck him I don't care about his guilt since he hasn't apologised for fucking me over) and he's never ever touched me or come near me ever since. Especially if I happen to be by myself. He'll stay there if there's others there but it's like he's uncomfortable around me when I should be the one who is visibly uncomfortable around him. Fuck I don't know tbh.

I just hate it all. Life has moved on and I'm currently studying at university but I'm still stuck in my shitty mental state. I don't know what to do. I can't even ask for help because I'm so scared of opening up to others. I can't do that. There's so much more to this shit as well, so it's all frustrating and gives me even more reason to not open up to anyone. Even a professional. I don't want to. I can't but still I thought maybe, just maybe, using a throwaway account to 'confess' all of this would ease some of it for me.",2.4710650693082776,3.732392010348072,4.05768851511408,88.78204082557892,75.27469426152398,7.305393918099492,23.907887429303287,7.904611402627629,1.0363968967119654,3949,118,886,58,83,1320,344,1063,0.19699999999999998,0.7559999999999999,0.047,-0.9995,1,0,2,0,0,0,95.0,1,1,3,1,62,62,26,5,28,0,97,27,9,5,23,161,178,88,0,10,33,9,5,12,2,7,4,2,9,3,66,55,0,3,25,1,2,16,33,37,2,13,52,9,125,25,142,107,19,152,1,0,1,14,68,69,16,20,66,618,191,5,0.0,0.0,0.03638336452869368,0.08128914092696696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031022898571061764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03909505077992068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052139047147151334,0.0,0.03068118315309968,0.13276104878951062,0.06971016874489297,0.0,0.07005824109265736,0.0,0.0,0.0909108189726859,0.0,0.03172555319525206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04070397794666551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03801306189676172,0.0,0.0,0.09634942560077528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0297678792039392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03843770076424438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038154014067525915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041938973153078034,0.06604431418262972,0.0,0.0,0.17237802228410734,0.10117531078221312,0.0,0.035626027764639856,0.033508048790625515,0.0,0.14059044321698225,0.0,0.0754067282431313,0.026635374065511568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05761035323506634,0.2757443139958104,0.038958229906481366,0.035765776454201086,0.14832369627742056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04107203139026497,0.0,0.16484859136196098,0.0,0.0,0.07361956941832286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0499807525005888,0.0,0.07479687690594491,0.0,0.0,0.0860404169708282,0.0,0.04208858740396293,0.0,0.07782867486424562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245031436931354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624990751977652,0.05266894496692963,0.21857829883868726,0.14947163891947562,0.0,0.16497383320947687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03527859449635059,0.0,0.03779966568089342,0.07491267021914311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037573047093711065,0.039551952445958896,0.03764575502877129,0.0,0.0,0.039626511014836,0.027407697602538254,0.02764527834573028,0.17253222356484205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035774569747721675,0.0,0.0,0.03970576170438525,0.2273786726326967,0.02835581823486035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03255455592808798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03570733275848729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04176610638273928,0.0,0.03729363735216426,0.042436839911469536,0.04776959096218137,0.03833369680178804,0.0,0.04002857746051715,0.16893996708517015,0.031839946188148734,0.03546519189432945,0.029649373737828225,0.07465467122003694,0.03773294094296553,0.0,0.06788308346223901,0.0,0.0,0.19135513067416568,0.24673068876776924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05740539335722625,0.0,0.0,0.02638948709716993,0.3576537118957769,0.14887344754877224,0.03117071548665347,0.0,0.03897685938557187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03513930265800081,0.0,0.0,0.0899013105659722,0.0651749283975592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229257929004539,0.04777958409436347,0.0,0.05919794483120834,0.10870168301847287,0.0,0.0,0.14250411105855942,0.0,0.025313081664077683,0.08110758773808112,0.036420608781635284,0.03881348823322209,0.0,0.032201014641118145,0.0,0.1230513266482366,0.04398160506331111,0.029593944912430864,0.0,0.0,0.06704477426269885,0.13824888970472854,0.033642602889974886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027142866912185398,0.0,0.0,0.05297032541416048,0.040763706753349456,0.0,0.09603752981996866
mentalhealth,LM264,2020/02/12,"Struggling I love LO so much, but I'm exhausted. I have no friends, it's just me trapped in the house with LO and my boyfriend and boyfriend's family.



I'm so lonely.",0.4392857142857132,2.657239142857144,1.6453571428571436,98.85089285714287,86.14285714285714,5.785714285714287,25.892857142857146,7.1686216300943375,1.020857142857143,130,6,31,2,4,41,26,35,0.37,0.48200000000000004,0.14800000000000002,-0.8796,0,3,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,2,4,1,1,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4108507967362742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3367122115171785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5028759146797546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3933431177148405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32037666683590155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4556120136309693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bruh_gotem,2020/02/12,I feel like fucking garbage Its nonstop over the smallest fucking things I think im actually going insane I'm tired of being so angry,2.8302564102564105,5.661571769230772,4.582307692307693,77.64602564102567,81.30769230769229,5.005128205128205,31.743589743589745,6.42735559955562,2.173297435897436,110,6,17,1,3,37,22,26,0.324,0.593,0.08199999999999999,-0.8096,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,7,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,2,6,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,1,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.3245934967298759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818492403371674,0.2376269846570748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6150119171406836,0.0,0.0,0.18903814911116712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592915014489083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250351236154326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209809149080013,0.21313232674313973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3823028921248511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Practical_Knee,2020/02/12,"Therapist seems a bit manipulative? Please, I need advice! My therapist seems a bit *too* interested in my well being. I used to think that this was a good thing, as I would get more quality care, but I'm seeing now that I should have trusted my gut instincts. 

I was talking (regrettably, a bit too honestly) about my suicidal ideations/intentions. She said that ""other therapists"" would call emergency services, but since she's apparently not like other therapists, she's willing to put her ""career on the line"" by ""believing in me"" and my ability to get better.  

She's making me read this book that she believes was brought to me ""by fate."" I respect her beliefs, but the fact that she's insisting on me actually reading (she's asked me to literally read and discuss the book with her, as a kind of ""assignment"") this book assignment, just based on her sense of ""fate"", puts a weird taste in my mouth. I don't know how to tell her that I just don't want to read it. I tried reading some of it, but I lost interest.  

At this point, I feel a bit threatened. It's either: ""do what I say is good for you (including reading this long, boring book that ""fate"" apparently brought me to)"" or ""stay the way you are"", with the implication that ""staying the way I am"" will get the ambulances and emergency services called on me. All with the additional guilt of apparently potentially ruining her career. 

I do not want to be institutionalized. I am not a threat to myself. 

I told her about my struggles with accepting my sexuality (I'm mostly attracted to the same sex, though I'm technically bisexual, and I have had trouble accepting this part of myself), and she seems a bit too focused on it. 

She invited me to go to a rock climbing wall at one of the university gyms (she apparently helps the students out as a community engagement... thing? Didn't quite catch what she said), and that rung some alarm bells in me, because I wasn't aware that it acceptable for therapists/counselors to have non-professional relationships with their clients. Although, I guess since that rock climbing thing is also a part of her role, that things are different, but still. It didn't sit right with me.  

All in all, I'm feeling big red flags, but I am known for being a bit paranoid. Please, any advice would be greatly appreciated.",6.046242956579384,6.9696982505800475,6.730615677825654,74.2237790023202,66.49419953596289,10.6118992376533,33.72232350016573,10.608840637214634,3.6590105402717934,1810,79,339,48,28,596,200,431,0.105,0.75,0.145,0.961,5,0,0,0,0,0,86.0,0,2,1,5,13,27,1,3,24,0,31,4,2,4,4,59,61,20,1,7,13,0,2,1,0,6,0,3,0,0,32,14,1,0,12,13,0,8,8,9,1,1,13,8,62,18,50,38,17,33,1,2,2,1,35,17,0,8,4,239,94,17,0.0,0.0,0.06978043398536447,0.0,0.0,0.1397514593796975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571840540431199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048627154236084304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668493127453251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04358995164449335,0.0,0.0,0.16112761247321014,0.0,0.06324205531699885,0.4684021859180715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603311021310236,0.0,0.07290606546782147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470950664171468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231208947254372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120782351518886,0.0,0.040639027638144164,0.11995321525885384,0.0,0.07883662616340273,0.07877292856775016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047929577783489836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446344812991355,0.03929833038387449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03493466668610192,0.0,0.0,0.06328136953088853,0.0,0.0,0.07805824466197525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047731420983027135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530214713674948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04845493617713526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548700411649742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15698623896207886,0.06759714769618998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143768399715116,0.0,0.07605640599928094,0.4291575943628527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677166593014792,0.0,0.061066514651976364,0.13603890205419628,0.0568651688380345,0.0,0.0,0.05698175317603075,0.19529162924957089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830251794157665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524337140574314,0.05710551464066984,0.0,0.0,0.07475455331149346,0.0,0.07821695890289032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057474549595315776,0.06250019545278743,0.0,0.0,0.33210015856327696,0.1900240676429294,0.045818743771146885,0.0702551808685286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683279215870933,0.0,0.04854850140737472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061759015570267174,0.0,0.0,0.0843532622242879,0.11351772141357486,0.0,0.0,0.06429330416669267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238938222017748,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Useful-Floor,2020/02/12,"Seeking help to possibly get an idea of what is wrong with me. So this is my first reddit post actually so I’m not sure if I will be doing this right or anything so please hang in there with me. It will also be quite long, so if you dont have the time I’d recommend moving on.

Anyways, my “story” ig ill call it. I’m currently 16[M], live in the US, and I want to possibly seek help but I am A) Terrified of the thought of meeting face to face with someone to discuss anything, B) Afraid I will be horribly judged if I seek help, and C) I’m afraid of what my parents will say/do if they learn about everything. This is why I have chosen to post on this subreddit.

I’m not sure exactly where to start, so ill go back to before high school. I was always a very lonely kid. I was diagnosed (not sure if thats even the correct term) with ADD around 2nd or 3rd grade. Before that time I was always the annoying kid in class, and therefore was a very lonely person because no one wanted to be around me, even though I could not control myself. Then after I was put on medication for ADD, I began to continue to have virtually zero friends. I was also bullied as well. A lot, in fact, and I dont even remember most of it. The one event that I can still remember exactly is when one of my “friends” told me that my parents paid him and the others to hang out with me. I remember that crushing me, and so after that I never even left my room other than for school and extracurricular activities, which I also barely participated in. I spent my weeknights and weekends in my room or the basement playing games on my computer. For years my parents always asked me why I dont ever hang out with anyone, or even if I had any friends at school, but I always told them yes and I was just playing with them on my computer, which was a lie. I was totally isolated from around the beginning of 1st grade all the way to my sophomore year of high school. 

I’m going to skip a big chunk of time up to freshmen/sophomore year because I dont remember most of what happened during the time before. So coming up to the end of freshmen year, we began to have all of those mental health assemblies, talking about depression/anxiety and everything else. I remember thinking that I had a normal life, and I would never be affected by any of those things. Then sophomore year hit. Sophomore year was possibly the year of the biggest changes in my life. The beginning of this year was around the time I realized that something may be wrong. A few months in I had become aware of the fact that I was horribly depressed. I had always heard about this sort of thing in the assemblies and in health class, and then I learned how people would cut themselves or do different things to themselves in order to feel better. So, me being me, I thought I would try that, but I was so afraid I never actually went through with it. Soon after this time, by an act of god himself a wonderful girl came into my life (whom I am still with over a year later :)) who I soon learned was dealing with depression and anxiety. I wont go into her story as I dont feel right doing that, but just know that her telling me about these things, I felt like I gained a purpose for my life— to help her get better. So I did just that, I did everything I could to support her, but at the same time I did the best I could to hide my problems because I did not want her to worry about me, she already had enough to worry about. Also around this time, I found a friend group which I became a part of, and will gladly say they are way better than anyone I had ever been friends with before. I love them all. So this I would say is when I thought everything was going right.

Then, around 8-12 months (November of last year) after my first battle with self harm(jsut to give a time frame) I became horribly depressed again. I could never figure out why, but this is when I gave into the temptations and did go through with cutting myself. I used a pair of sharp scissors on my left hand and for many weeks I had cuts all down my hand. I also began to deal with what I call my “intrusive thoughts.” I hated myself (even though I had for years before this) more than ever. Different thoughts such as my friends hating me, my girlfriend hating me, and even as far as my girlfriend cheating on me began to fill my head. I also was filled with much regret from my past, thinking all the isolation and bullying I dealt with was my fault, and therefore to get rid of these thoughts I would cut. Sometimes just to get rid of them, and sometimes just to punish myself. I also became suicidal, and although I never attempted anything, the thought of suicide filled my thoughts. So for weeks I lived in fear of everything, thinking everyone hated me, or that people were lying to me or hiding things from me, or that my girlfriend was cheating on me. Even though deep down I knew these things were not true, my head kept telling me they were. Now I had been telling my girlfriend about some of these things, but never the whole extent of everything, and even thought I felt horribly guilty for not telling her, I was so afraid of being judged or made fun of that I haven’t told her everything. And up to this day I still deal with these feelings. A few words I would describe I feel is empty, lonely, scared. I always have this indescribable feeling in my gut that I cant get rid of. My short term memory has also just gone completely out of wack, and I have trouble remembering my thoughts from mere seconds before, so I have no idea if that means anything or not.

Please give me advice or something, I want to be able to figure out what to do, or what may be wrong with me. Questions would also be appreciated, because I highly doubt this was easy to follow, so I’d be happy to answer anything. If you decided to read my story, I greatly appreciate it. I hope everything makes sense and if not, I’d be happy to clarify.",6.003117532541893,5.828112531969314,6.357603542390354,80.66441386418295,66.4765558397272,9.390026847857897,31.488707358348922,8.968343076075232,2.4361267040755297,4652,164,927,70,67,1503,385,1173,0.16699999999999998,0.725,0.10800000000000001,-0.998,6,7,2,0,0,2,132.0,2,2,7,10,75,59,13,7,42,1,101,17,7,8,24,210,180,95,2,28,43,3,10,1,10,15,9,3,2,5,64,63,0,2,42,5,2,19,25,33,1,7,69,13,166,26,165,78,22,156,0,7,0,1,73,59,0,32,74,702,230,14,0.032863769292836915,0.0,0.06414059634819064,0.0,0.0,0.032114095001987815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036265986624037884,0.2365302998711597,0.1640717322798494,0.0,0.0,0.0446969801315947,0.0,0.05028138711385609,0.0,0.0,0.045958223220495364,0.0,0.1352204097669338,0.1755343331659475,0.030723188006047317,0.0,0.0,0.025270210026776242,0.0,0.0801337949217397,0.036295451208716314,0.16778788282333496,0.0,0.0344884983393915,0.08719599988089081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671151656753379,0.03758739706296997,0.0,0.0,0.034765510331520755,0.02830922728877725,0.03445703684416332,0.0,0.03685951172493972,0.10495618252433872,0.0,0.0,0.021194412442079917,0.1016433092929431,0.08491654900850266,0.03335603405532045,0.0,0.06867128842855474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925804642731135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02745346225739556,0.0,0.029107545109938394,0.033957058718780485,0.0,0.1953558870509593,0.08918148243501206,0.0,0.031402739905198665,0.23628669417859965,0.0,0.0,0.03698087712616604,0.0830845460012018,0.0,0.06310874449671798,0.0,0.0,0.0559078107440455,0.0,0.03603342675650656,0.15234279980124782,0.0,0.08584981526725463,0.06305184416958866,0.09338618717489884,0.0,0.0,0.03623242166465016,0.0,0.0,0.029061322651390862,0.06996818702306354,0.0,0.12978467347801895,0.06745541698424239,0.06986529995830232,0.0,0.0,0.08811156727385235,0.10416712981206527,0.0,0.032641138170085134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419839067973229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01806106814152657,0.026788358242519742,0.0,0.0,0.07141316298951697,0.0,0.09285060859461404,0.016055577663373444,0.0,0.058038620755479074,0.0290834016616514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027939601433258642,0.02966083487400409,0.031096493117580937,0.021936821194319417,0.03331870389038192,0.0,0.03579827910400104,0.0,0.03310679011865004,0.033118949806149316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052463094221789255,0.034928985823799275,0.02415865178399426,0.0,0.15207938919448866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03219951626807272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06680802178158178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947397990442884,0.03558825959320377,0.03137218640301916,0.04556719938639794,0.02869537573183118,0.0,0.07214909975767116,0.0,0.11114688601680286,0.06294881319528392,0.0,0.0,0.031446188864255424,0.0,0.03303716517328713,0.03681494283490682,0.034954663924253775,0.03287266269553628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22336946519900852,0.08419643823449402,0.0,0.07840376519033401,0.03290236619303662,0.1330395561490291,0.0,0.0,0.03428407869419123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02784536507485841,0.05060027036025128,0.06500621631004125,0.0,0.023261145054362223,0.0,0.0787351458273629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189525920153389,0.03729341594022556,0.09292114089529432,0.0,0.0,0.026414652900126682,0.11489753156482377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15283259622564674,0.06317332914601871,0.09686545941522524,0.26090161899860176,0.17246815342276575,0.0,0.0,0.094208219715596,0.0,0.022312342115363544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03953106805009607,0.028383745000675618,0.0,0.054232102877878594,0.07753561039926897,0.05217146076421345,0.052722666829417036,0.0,0.029548475374287536,0.03046504338247528,0.08896332046339041,0.03669122478259056,0.0,0.0,0.03563935592354088,0.0,0.06674950592439917,0.0,0.16341835158618645,0.1077941180423512,0.0,0.23279508937945134
mentalhealth,dinnurtym3,2020/02/12,"Making up Lost Time Within the last two months, I finally decided to see a professional about what is going on in my life. I have always known what the issue was, but wanted to try a holistic approach; I ate healthy, exercised regularly, and held a job for a year. All these things helped a lot, but I still felt a weight dragging that I couldn't get rid of. I am now on the right medication and, for the first time since I was an adolescent, I feel normal. I can function almost without any problems. However, after having been in this state for about a week now, I feel this nagging thought of how much time I have lost do the inability to function for almost 6 years. 

**Tl;dr - Now that I am receiving the help I need, how do I make up for almost 6 years of an undertreated problem that affected every aspect of my life?**",4.6696725014116325,5.624067192546587,5.8026538678712605,79.52940146809715,69.62111801242236,8.835911914172783,28.92207792207793,9.095868883498916,2.3284732919254663,642,23,125,12,11,214,99,161,0.114,0.8240000000000001,0.062,-0.8018,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,3,8,5,1,0,15,0,13,6,0,5,1,28,28,6,0,6,3,0,4,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,9,2,2,1,6,1,0,3,2,5,0,2,9,5,16,0,23,18,3,28,0,2,1,0,3,8,0,4,16,91,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4170326058062344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551159682578488,0.0,0.0,0.09440418791003986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696410156397165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403858438762577,0.0,0.1332915502723986,0.15207346852023496,0.0,0.11808250704143287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252912450613885,0.0,0.07889613245732059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18609984230431506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14489481844855465,0.1377600966184581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315901870250455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961091392644555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030827245707384,0.11802208453776646,0.0,0.0,0.18533044371949509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984925273508764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108069446900957,0.0,0.10205064843104622,0.10293526374055076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601675886979298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656691269840253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185538165821443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062370847689333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114835561626388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086397753535164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922276250328122,0.0,0.0,0.11020970720376436,0.2428458763326518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425149222924584,0.0,0.13560959392937574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188121783957172,0.0,0.1113551862302321,0.169048634284492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13382011681858613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26819177774356595
mentalhealth,chipsham93,2020/02/12,"non-pc advice on mental health awareness This might be along post but fuck it. I've been seeing a lot posts regarding mental health issues lately so I thought I would give my on non-pc thoughts on my views to do with mental health. The saddest thing regarding mental health is that most people will show sympathy towards someone who decides to open up about a mental health issue at the starting point and will glorify the end point but it's that in-between phase when someone actually tries and I mean actually is proactively trying to better themselves where most people struggle. The people closest to that person will most likely go against them intentionally or unintentionally because that person is initially acting incongruent to how he/she has always behaved.  

A example would be someone with social anxiety. If someone is shy, nervous and doesn't like to speak up or be noticed and all of sudden he/she starts to express themselves more but because it's not normal/natural for that person to do so he/she will most likely come across as weird or strange because it hasn't become a natural way for that person to start behaving and the people around them which could be long term friends or even family members will most likely say to him/her that they are acting weird or strange which unintentionally discourages that person not to better themselves as they are hammered back into acting like their former submissive depressed self's despite initially wanting to change and improve for the better.

The main point of what am getting at is just because someone or you decides to open about something regarding a mental health issue. Don't expect everyone around you that you have known over the years to show genuine sympathy. There will be a lot of people around you that will convey sympathy because it's the pc/appropriate thing to do but that doesn't mean it's genuine from everyone. There is always a bunch people that are secretly happy to keep you the exact same way you have always been. Even if the current you is sad and depressed so always be willing to walk away from people that are not letting you improve yourself and hang around people if you can that are liking the new direction your going in. peace out",7.8269950738916245,8.764236694581282,7.281038423645325,71.78637536945816,62.596059113300505,9.353142857142855,34.95921182266009,9.281916038205594,3.3629634679802947,1822,76,284,29,25,569,189,406,0.126,0.7609999999999999,0.113,-0.1562,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,10,5,3,18,20,1,2,19,0,45,7,0,2,2,65,61,28,0,8,17,0,0,6,1,11,6,2,0,6,27,20,0,2,8,2,0,8,7,9,0,0,4,4,20,11,51,38,13,51,0,4,2,1,29,25,1,17,20,210,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.11711614383954448,0.0,0.0,0.058638041796686524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19972216964721265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04590510925179686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21367542952300134,0.0,0.0,0.056378451713023435,0.046141597067251336,0.0,0.18289822645076967,0.06627289932581208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921366257411462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347933665191767,0.05169062534343465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04791062162347939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336769881849377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05314829661710402,0.0,0.0,0.07926797438538268,0.0,0.0,0.11467831648237545,0.0,0.0,0.05656915867854932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046361177034657586,0.05547540606676362,0.031351125140331636,0.057564080095447986,0.06820660082690735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387845391319329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3827071302030516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878948194796609,0.0,0.05333688405860377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769038954063994,0.0,0.0,0.061361114155587565,0.0,0.17589802247951805,0.0,0.0,0.05310421240642702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203142990794374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073019720592652,0.0,0.0,0.3628370090220767,0.06365783115168734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057955031631534926,0.0,0.0,0.05879401492221605,0.0,0.06831824592869079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33280979482836553,0.2619785239830965,0.0,0.0,0.1701777307889131,0.0,0.11494003299698748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04771989018076359,0.0,0.0,0.04781772496996159,0.0,0.06260027689730747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061169471037501325,0.25421823050010833,0.046196238258066964,0.0,0.0,0.1274195641370605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273223393914405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973182727593926,0.0,0.0,0.09527754114644192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148148340855761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035393620488468634,0.09526135787718064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525435086603625,0.0,0.0,0.03864247198578775
mentalhealth,MrBeanIsReal,2020/02/12,I can’t cry I just can’t do it. I know it’s not as serious as many of the issues you guys are dealing with. With that being said any advice would be appreciated.,1.0549999999999995,2.3130678333333385,4.167777777777779,86.555,79.0,7.022222222222222,20.333333333333336,7.793537801064563,0.5622333333333334,126,3,30,2,3,46,29,36,0.09,0.78,0.131,0.1083,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,6,9,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352519258661243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333048567706716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3768551574948458,0.0,0.3536984325185565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3397012345420654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35808437754017675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18854673866012076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34782732148990186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3263458149833675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24371282226140095,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Barbhunter88,2020/02/12,"In need of some help I am a 27 year old male and I feel like I am finally looking to get some help, just not sure where.  I feel as if my social anxiety has caused me to never be able to develop any real/close relationships with anyone especially with a female.  Sometimes I just feel like I am not liked or people just don’t think of me when they are going to do things and it really gets me down.  It’s very hard for me to not over think things and play these mental gymnastics inside my head.",3.6239389736477112,4.280665679611655,5.041775312066574,85.1233009708738,71.81553398058253,8.604160887656034,22.481276005547848,8.841846274778883,1.2091120665742023,387,8,85,7,7,130,70,103,0.07400000000000001,0.802,0.124,0.728,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,0,2,0,8,1,1,1,2,24,18,7,0,2,8,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,5,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,5,13,5,14,17,2,10,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,4,8,58,18,0,0.17941815784032228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201049984221,0.0,0.13725439965875294,0.0,0.0,0.12545334764191016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18431187110818825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721576345495639,0.2563527356211386,0.0,0.1965438220238022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18747716452038374,0.0,0.10196747379372513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16072342810723064,0.0,0.1841347920839608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405204184558336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629639474787119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15066606496813764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808113035019564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303629063937586,0.13837834410503785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18826917527068426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438595979360405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20421714325588894,0.11493986617700999,0.0,0.0,0.19262795614935802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828942172568097,0.0,0.0,0.17744914581449553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909949043782355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383949034175551,0.22992782191277755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803877040782187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553941119379575
mentalhealth,Onywan,2020/02/12,"Therapy seems to try getting you to the point where you can function at your job again But if functioning at your job has caused you to be depressed

The whole thing seems kind of doomed from the start",4.634615384615382,6.347247846153842,3.3979487179487187,93.85538461538464,70.53846153846153,7.2512820512820495,25.82051282051281,7.793537801064563,1.1029589743589752,162,5,34,2,3,46,29,39,0.174,0.826,0.0,-0.8313,2,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,5,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,7,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,7,6,1,6,1,2,0,0,5,4,0,3,2,24,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629741318215293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22048539328266534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13374516866352745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5080647941856805,0.0,0.0,0.2665761041625921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24199502894245825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4660907063206696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811923391400176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927489744346493,0.0,0.1700696009974035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17380165293354244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858057429560211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Genericynt,2020/02/12,"Why do people say stuff like ""don't date until you get your depression/anxiety/mental health sorted""? I see this come up a lot on reddit, and just irl. I will never not struggle with my mental health, so what these people are actually saying is that I should never date anyone ever. They'll usually say stuff like ""you're only gonna hurt or burden the other person"". Like no I am open about my mental health from the start, and I try my absolute best to not let it affect my relationships. 

This is just overall a really harmful thing to say to anyone struggling.",6.882232415902138,6.575434669724772,7.517018348623853,73.52610856269115,64.6880733944954,9.835474006116213,27.340978593272173,9.2995712137729,2.225035474006116,445,10,79,7,6,148,78,109,0.11599999999999999,0.779,0.105,-0.0803,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,1,5,9,0,2,4,0,10,3,0,1,3,17,15,5,0,1,5,0,0,3,0,4,3,4,0,1,10,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,0,5,12,4,9,10,2,12,0,1,1,0,9,3,0,3,11,58,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.1302420018426779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18664282324025544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006265360820688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496776277833046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12072619070123175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972964041390148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255992480883043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14287640048185338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364763913994641,0.0,0.19561189274885796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346666007282327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690014478982459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205871946062344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150569026904452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850548203272615,0.11653596604101173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550071213471389,0.0,0.0,0.14329081784783565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42454499071420737,0.0,0.0,0.10635384703551944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944667891949996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790519380314009,0.3055696136419631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866781687433459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061356670674656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14699218079434698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043086186086464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dontfollowme69420,2020/02/12,"i’m dying i wanted to vent out but i have no one to do vent out to so i thought this would be the only place i can do this.

i’ll just get into it i started dating my so called ex now when i was 15 we dated for a year she was 17 at the time and while we were about 7 months into our relationship my friend had this fake account where he texted girls and blackmailed them for nudes and so on keep in mind this is the middle east so guys always stand up to girls and have this dumb mindset anyways so one day my friend tells me he’s blackmailing this girl and he tells me she wants a picture of his face and he was too scared to send it so i told him whatever just send my face then he told me she asked for a dick pic so he gave me the acc and i did it for him and whatever i didn’t think much of it tbh anyways that same account turns out it was a guy that had been at my school and left so the second day at school he sends the dick pic to his friend’s group at my school and that was in grade 11 and since then i stopped going to school i’m a senior now in highschool anyways for the next few days after that happened i started getting panic attacks and the white in my eyes would turn yellow from stress so my parents noticed and i had to lie about it and we went to a doctor and i was diagnosed with gilbert’s syndrome it’s a liver syndrome so my ex noticed and i had to fake something up and whatever me and my ex broke up at the 11 month mark which is almost a year ago, 2 weeks ago i saw her at a uni i was applying to and we looked at each other turns out she knows a friend of mine she told her about me so i followed my ex again on instagram and i see that she knows about the incident of the nudes and she’s following the guy that leaked my nudes and everyone involved i found that out today and i started getting the same symptoms again pain in my liver and lower stomach and i can hear my heartbeats loud and clear and i’m always dizzy and it’s really getting to me i’ve been crying for hours since and i just want people to forget it ever happened i’m scared she might tell people about this and ruin my life and i don’t want to confront her i’ve been hoping i don’t wake up tomorrow or just drink till i die i really want to get it over with it’s been a year since that incident and i just want to die i don’t want to live in this hell anymore it eats away from me and i can’t focus on anything i really need help idk what to do with my life and i hope i can hold myself from ending it soon.",0.9574909090909108,2.591381767272729,2.6025454545454565,95.9958181818182,80.41818181818181,5.5636363636363635,19.727272727272727,6.360717304075467,-0.12938181818181824,1972,48,469,16,50,648,222,550,0.168,0.772,0.06,-0.997,3,0,2,0,0,1,3.0,5,0,1,0,33,19,4,4,24,0,36,20,12,0,2,84,82,52,3,12,7,5,0,0,4,3,6,2,0,6,32,49,2,3,5,1,2,7,6,13,0,3,26,8,79,6,70,52,5,78,1,2,6,5,60,34,4,5,36,317,111,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832094954571574,0.0,0.07247808302417236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12045186378856718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717814795120685,0.0,0.0,0.059562546767898024,0.0,0.06766549981704778,0.08234266309418647,0.06800336285493769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739080402370974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950599651609275,0.14003727519485054,0.0,0.0,0.07346414427511441,0.2253569394298429,0.0,0.0,0.07408396459420316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090481362796783,0.0,0.07406277728707449,0.0,0.0,0.0641071684332879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654718251916931,0.0,0.06916216152086084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936089936760722,0.22368233596181192,0.0,0.18907773041380307,0.0,0.04113520400261924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21500264464643748,0.1280107339227813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157748473102687,0.0,0.04851476707165863,0.0,0.0,0.14377928022582726,0.0712796889770494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433464151607972,0.0,0.0,0.07955627539600399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786410473784626,0.0,0.10224822433197643,0.0,0.0,0.06391283810356156,0.0,0.06078094404176185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678370829340392,0.07308313481018698,0.0,0.11554600036192525,0.0,0.053207604873173366,0.05366882939821575,0.0,0.0,0.07697691745863337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164810147364456,0.0,0.0,0.09809307950614032,0.05504822748614415,0.07701738947716939,0.08492229770742428,0.08036938924585305,0.0,0.0,0.100358313113105,0.0,0.07562166162060052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910538333399464,0.0,0.0,0.07770899854634869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492995018467086,0.2930095685542243,0.05767746369804536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17962037328555444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05572163579069688,0.0,0.0,0.15369274237853756,0.0,0.0,0.06051289448969864,0.08291100918299688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523050089645354,0.0,0.0,0.18978984780685512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046378161134958136,0.0,0.05746160993820845,0.04220534160126025,0.0,0.06860774681537975,0.2074864845625825,0.0,0.0,0.23618586335674516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988410643760033,0.0,0.058058844707098566,0.0,0.0,0.06709695579174521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283330564691599,0.0,0.0,0.13983097961455346
mentalhealth,Squishy_Pixelz,2020/02/12,"I don’t want to exist, but death is terrifying I don’t plan on doing anything stupid, but I do frequently get that “call of the void” thing where I look at things and think “I could die”. I wouldn’t be in a rush to leave a burning building for example. I just feel worthless.",5.670526315789473,4.614045526315788,6.311228070175438,83.65526315789475,67.42105263157895,9.705263157894738,31.280701754385966,8.841846274778883,2.1593438596491232,213,7,48,3,3,70,44,57,0.39399999999999996,0.588,0.018000000000000002,-0.9806,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,1,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,9,13,3,2,3,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,2,7,0,7,10,0,6,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854082092026611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35414807717921565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769123033151048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35995058418561665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753656236324895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812022465990048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3672386082755532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912464515697302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4608315064666663,0.2222320675309832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20456693401196507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fakeaccount3377,2020/02/12,"mental hospitals? I am wondering if people have any advice about mental hospitals (in the US). I am now officially in the adult population, which freaks me out a bit, my only experiences have been pediatric. I am afraid because of feeling suicidal again. I am also scared of what will happen if I end up in the hospital, and when/if family finds out, when/if my school finds out, when/if my job finds out, etc. Looking for experiences, insight, advice, next steps, really anything helps please",6.520149812734082,7.838055640449443,7.430955056179776,68.2061329588015,65.62921348314606,11.326591760299625,31.687265917603,11.20814326018867,4.048616479400748,388,15,64,12,6,130,59,89,0.098,0.825,0.077,-0.4325,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,4,0,8,1,0,0,0,13,12,4,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,2,10,0,12,10,2,13,0,0,1,0,3,8,0,3,4,43,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31573320596736104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12919296008344955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986080125513656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294341156209322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848051134325063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17637278410598775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14308699240678538,0.0,0.18017302263906093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3160574271382594,0.15229671115538515,0.0,0.0816854719825621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4429664061582237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428597718510761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828480304543923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160315288236056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13566287033299845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3256125448940839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17181223056768094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12286746553957767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199971498753776,0.0,0.0,0.17733542368809102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349425509029836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16174158981276818,0.1634991021108007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17671150845251615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19432699022030936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17519609541627912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TakenVeryLiterally,2020/02/12,"Could this be a mood disorder? 

Im a 16 year old male by the way and have been experiencing similar symptoms for at least 3-4 years.

It feel like I have a dysthymic and pessimistic mood which is pretty much a high functioning depression. This lasts until I usually have periods of high motivation. During these times, I usually get really into an activity. It is usually a video game but has also been weight lifting or boxing. I have never gone more than a month with consistent dedication to these hobbies. The most I've ever lifted for was about 2 months last summer. I wasn't necessarily happy during this time, but I had just came out of a cloud of being a bit suicidal. 

Most recently, It has been a single month of lifting and now I feel bad again. I lifted nearly everyday and started eating well and spent most of my time thinking about lifting. 

I feel like dedicating my energy to a video game seems to suppress the sadness for a while. maybe at most a month where I don’t feel too bad. 

I should add do have a bit of the occasional anxiety where I get randomly overwhelmed and I've been struggling with depersonalization for a while. 

I feel like it doesn’t meet the standards for cyclothymia because I’m not sure I’m experiencing hypomania. I don’t know if it’s dysthymia because I sometimes have periods where I can get into exercising and gaming . 

Anyone know what this could be?",4.9947735849056585,6.683756052830192,6.320141509433963,73.35002358490568,69.60377358490567,9.526415094339624,30.23113207547169,9.888512548439397,3.144135849056603,1114,45,198,28,20,376,145,265,0.146,0.782,0.07200000000000001,-0.9734,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,12,14,0,2,20,0,28,4,0,1,3,43,46,15,1,4,6,0,6,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,13,14,2,1,10,6,1,2,6,6,1,0,10,8,18,6,27,30,10,42,0,3,0,0,5,11,0,8,31,139,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615923937397299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242042274672905,0.0,0.0,0.0753339635985884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799159647476764,0.13135399862366615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352472598356168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322528608306578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17204244811207722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279587363843753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347880132633775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102444058865466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745654612152543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723816425204402,0.23090736138191945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16886832619076675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469070135644555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276653945122345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637714839252715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842162334235885,0.17564414490314376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15790823297635492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082388091104638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34398656461645405,0.0,0.0792009293028879,0.0,0.08309534447336919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305448171109513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096098047392072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902068264707532,0.0,0.10637975864406632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808199455719543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065571205763822,0.0,0.07625857276420274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126327183484172,0.0,0.11784952637559898,0.0,0.1015432038812104,0.11198259341166056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903512138919342,0.0,0.0,0.18847130693065636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3559795144006409,0.0,0.0,0.08551860038713824,0.0,0.13119768603687393,0.09687074966151707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13876141148373775
mentalhealth,OccupyMyTimePls,2020/02/12,"This is me, pleading in a way I guess. It’s happening again. I’m falling deeper into the abyss and every time I think I’m climbing out I get gut punched and kicked right back down. I don’t see a light at the end of the tunnel. I’ve been down this road so many times.. so many times. No one to talk to, no one who understands what I’m going through. I’m to the point to where it’s like, why am I still fighting. Why do I let myself endure this misery. There’s an easy way out, and it’s looking better by the day. I’m so depressed and stressed yet when I cry for a release, it’s like I’m still completely numb. My body knows something’s wrong, but my mind can’t even handle reality. I don’t know what I’m going to do, and I haven’t for a while. This seems like an uphill battle I’ll never win. It’s getting so much worse. And I thought I was making progress. My home isn’t a home. My family isn’t a family. How the fuck am I so alone yet there’s people around me. I’ve lost so many people, good genuine people. I can’t take this shit much longer. Maybe I’m next.",-0.7060439560439562,1.3136989145299154,1.5368070818070834,98.92942307692309,89.76923076923076,4.368498168498169,16.476800976800977,5.773587663045528,-0.7232840048840048,822,19,200,6,28,275,124,234,0.207,0.7120000000000001,0.08,-0.9808,0,1,1,0,2,0,31.0,0,0,0,5,19,15,4,1,14,0,15,5,3,2,1,22,41,16,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,13,10,0,0,6,0,0,4,10,9,0,2,4,3,20,6,18,36,2,33,0,2,2,1,3,12,2,2,18,113,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002429529250558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316426848854723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911018209183229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024929013099145,0.0,0.12872466781666322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150563150345425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729675981291647,0.0747377227985815,0.0,0.0998135635693804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026417525712874,0.0,0.0,0.07654247014073852,0.0,0.09764005027779783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21849646960768151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713594349633386,0.12109266464994488,0.0,0.13172284892289474,0.09720077084550442,0.0,0.0,0.1276629286179641,0.0,0.10247875860750404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23248882594966025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273772611433844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850261809951344,0.0,0.16985004647647736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731614688107697,0.0,0.1265046799390556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735567409493134,0.3524746055837833,0.11642437136715793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11701313946079908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17038100255469318,0.0,0.08937943167848655,0.0,0.12324746059735205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15705647030881492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410249913099804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095509586608118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896712287722144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234717586996308,0.10549944749581096,0.0,0.0,0.1189566503580704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921570697117699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850954984616019,0.0,0.13274851312225458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871328288980674,0.09314582377149773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425590392249876,0.0,0.09200157320570224,0.20272445355301924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064276857040195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18397189274524706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20914053022872264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809906146609454,0.0,0.1267045726569528,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,veelively,2020/02/12,"I hate my personality and can’t live with myself I hate myself. I hate everything about myself. I hate absolutely everything about my personality. I think I’m weird, hyper, unfunny, awkward, and annoying. I’ve always felt out of place even with my friends who are the only people in school I feel like I can really relate to. All of them are unique but pretty popular. They get invited to parties, have a lot of friends and acquaintances outside of our group, can talk to people with ease, and are generally well like. Although I have a good number of acquaintances with people from a lot of other groups outside of the group, I still feel like I’m weird and awkward. I usually win people over with my dry humor, but one-on-one in an actual conversation, it just feels dry and uninteresting. When I hear my friends talking to each other one-on-one, the sound like normal, interesting conversations; but in my conversations with my friends they just seem awkward and un-human in that makes any sense. The other thing is that all my friends say I’m funny, but there are plenty of times where I make jokes that are weird and are usually followed by awkward silences. I’m fine in group settings, I’m actually one of the most dominant people in group conversations because other people can lead the conversation when it gets stale, but one-on-one I’m a mess.They say I have a dry, witty, and weird sense of humor, but in a good way. 

I also feel like my values and who I am as a person don’t really translate in reality, and I think that’s mostly because of innate characteristics that I have. I come off as really immature, reckless, and energetic, when internally I’m pretty composed. When I hear them talk about my motives, actions, and behavior in possible scenarios, it doesn’t sound like me at all. It’s like they don’t know me, but also if everyone perceives me the same way then I must actually be like that as a person, and I hate it.

I feel like events when I was younger, how I grew up, and genetics (my parents are also very unconventional but I don’t like their personalities I know that sounds really really bad) have ingrained certain unalterable characteristics that are perceived as unorthodox and weird. It’s not like I’m not generally liked, people tend to like me, but it also always makes me feel out of place and odd. 

Recently I haven’t been talking a lot, because I’m afraid that anything I’ll say will be weird. I’m usually very talkative so this has worried my friends a lot, but honestly it’s for the best.

I’ve been kind of rambling but basically, I hate myself. It’s not just that I hate myself, I literally can’t live with myself. I hate who I am as a person, and that I can’t change the basic fundamental innate parts of my personality. I contemplate suicide frequently because I cannot live with my thoughts and me as a person to the fullest extent. It’s gotten to the point where I try to suppress ALL of my thoughts because I hate them that much. I need help. I don’t want to be like this forever but I don’t know what to do. I’m in therapy, but that hasn’t helped and I feel completely hopeless.",5.223691083698316,6.233515359143329,6.513391730622412,74.73391368987825,68.39044481054366,9.809924860368866,30.78510869128461,9.982072881682312,3.0380197613211704,2481,97,467,59,41,840,223,607,0.11800000000000001,0.669,0.213,0.9966,2,0,0,0,0,2,76.0,1,0,7,4,23,57,10,5,24,0,41,0,0,6,6,95,90,53,1,5,20,1,8,14,6,2,0,8,0,8,34,32,0,1,19,1,0,5,15,23,1,1,7,16,76,34,61,78,16,43,0,1,0,0,47,21,0,8,28,311,110,3,0.0,0.0,0.14660416453698394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601866500206948,0.08333636696223741,0.0,0.0,0.03405416539392404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041209210870891605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041812311551809166,0.15263276724028385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05255285807586437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05297496320101137,0.04313701307908978,0.05250491770231401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033075471858743065,0.0,0.0,0.047850843408460936,0.09001219031186587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17724350987576654,0.1431004457701107,0.048081897626345314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321367969706752,0.0,0.05232646679111756,0.0,0.0,0.08400464094867252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4449671824454506,0.0,0.0,0.11288112926728246,0.0,0.06713128887516584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521476244755497,0.08256324251056747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425121848891254,0.0,0.13265706886393627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702951394832071,0.0,0.0,0.10028061873113914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036812452256246256,0.037131557125710014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04906495469577371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573423628427994,0.038085913676343314,0.0,0.0,0.05560472627040434,0.0542286514525484,0.0,0.24302023490437136,0.34980334450714345,0.10463988426398554,0.0,0.04733907389742679,0.05645443947655479,0.0,0.1018928878560876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604034578257366,0.0,0.0494451241997346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947003038850533,0.0,0.05068072871695861,0.0,0.045588338086615186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0399916604421702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05477625201254782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16100039976493433,0.0,0.0,0.057267562043404815,0.0,0.03326901979972627,0.06417480533403748,0.0,0.07951129457751083,0.02920037702050943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0339990838971831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16545865046557592,0.08263775295898006,0.02953678853338405,0.07949778926792815,0.0,0.0,0.04502535359533151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05085575598216825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dazedANDconfused2020,2020/02/12,"Wife may have Paranoid Personality Disorder - How to help? So it’s a very long, horrible, story, but I’ve recently had a counselor suggest that I’m up against PPD. The counselor took his time listening to my story and says that it sounds like classic PPD, but could also be Bipolar. Since she refuses to see him, he can’t diagnose. Just told me that it’s not good and that I have to find a way to get her in front of a professional that can see her body language and all. 

Her latest BS was suggesting we go our separate ways. When I told her to pack up and I’d rent her a suv to go back to her parents, she had an all break down. She’s locked herself in her room. Been days now of telling me to leave her alone. I know that what I said didn’t help, but she’s been threatening divorce anytime I stand up for myself and it was just a matter of time I lost my cool. 

Long story short, she thinks that I’ve been having her spied on for a year by cops or something. In reality, she drives a GD Porsche and cops tend to take notice of cars like that. My brother is a cop, hundreds of miles away, but she decided it makes sense anyways. Before this, she was being spied on by her old employer, whom she just abandoned one day...

How do I get her help? I can’t just break down her door and force her into my car. Nor can I call cops and make them drag her away. Help!",2.2307251497925966,3.651831378091877,3.5104624366262094,91.80969119680442,76.20848056537102,6.9005377170072215,23.965125211245972,7.586124646067393,0.8672339529881699,1052,33,241,14,23,343,158,283,0.095,0.8240000000000001,0.081,-0.4767,3,1,1,0,1,0,34.0,2,0,1,1,12,6,0,0,11,1,22,3,1,4,2,35,41,19,0,1,10,3,0,2,0,1,2,4,3,1,16,10,0,2,4,0,1,7,5,2,0,1,14,7,45,4,33,23,2,41,0,2,2,0,50,16,0,2,15,157,61,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857621918377994,0.0,0.10699963495807327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514185936556828,0.10288377111459156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385375714399452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486213915128483,0.0,0.0,0.1366245341123555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682823617664364,0.0,0.0,0.17257957700301546,0.0,0.0,0.1358039592627759,0.0,0.0,0.15334613864952168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222905740555426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398097243327578,0.0,0.15208299569154626,0.11222490657156184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35873268604991604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353285939408212,0.0,0.0,0.14167464684080994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073562710248612,0.0,0.0,0.23681718803449106,0.0,0.0,0.14605826438960245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786247829635472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233193525645142,0.14040036055744878,0.0,0.09066619304326856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14856882048805442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682880616000772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211114007677152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12727422970851265,0.10640295462281864,0.0,0.0,0.21324220155880627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106805598709786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300560677106244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060078225041932,0.0,0.11694690434528734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573349581079702,0.0,0.0,0.15603945429554686,0.0,0.0,0.2557028454733166,0.14865647764621195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039883035476383,0.0,0.2124080734703725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616267090394049
mentalhealth,oneveryverybluegirl,2020/02/12,Panic attacks. So I’ve always suffered with small anxiety attacks. But this past week I’ve had 5 anxiety attacks. They get worse each time. I have a bad heart to begin with from chemotherapy. I can’t even leave the house without having one. I was wondering if anyone had any helpful advice?,2.366207792207792,5.235822763636367,3.5651948051948037,83.49636363636365,85.0,6.051948051948052,26.038961038961038,7.447530270364453,1.8854415584415585,232,10,39,4,7,75,45,55,0.40700000000000003,0.55,0.043,-0.9677,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,2,6,3,1,2,0,6,1,1,0,0,7,9,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,3,0,4,0,5,6,1,5,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,4,24,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809162152315005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405092804633505,0.0,0.0,0.12590123553513108,0.0,0.2832624818686533,0.0,0.0,0.1294538706960576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6318688612273745,0.0,0.0,0.15458378216169272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228291971783856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672776801285424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21939124566700785,0.12409513072308585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21362617122137084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19603604024430601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545534338405273,0.0,0.0,0.21722135900893524,0.0,0.0,0.17673663938591594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795635430929472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850777110641125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17846790931532153,0.2007759330155892,0.0,0.0,0.1886730076186065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheBadBedPotato,2020/02/13,"I not suicidal. Normally I'll only think about suicide sometimes. But now I think about it multiple times a day, with varying degrees of detail/planning. How worried should I be? Any advice to deal with it? It's almost like a instinct, every time that I have bad feelings I start to fantasize. Multiple times a day. Thinking about what method would be better, how to be found (the least traumatizing way to whoever find me), what time to do it without having a significant impact on any important dates to the people I care about. I feel like I don't have the strength to deal with anything anymore, I'm tired, my soul is tired and I want to run away. I feel tormented. 

Still, I don't think I'm really suicidal. I wonder how bad is my mental state, I don't know how concerning is to feel like this, and I think if I really talk to someone that I know they will worry to much and take things out of proportion.",4.2683025354533735,5.5369547988826815,5.337541899441341,81.31956596476151,70.84357541899442,8.859647614954879,28.853029651912337,9.265573868473778,2.4658187365706916,715,27,139,15,13,236,100,179,0.146,0.715,0.139,-0.5068,0,0,1,0,0,1,24.0,0,0,1,2,10,8,0,0,7,0,16,2,0,4,0,34,35,9,3,5,4,0,4,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,10,7,0,0,14,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,1,4,20,6,24,28,2,16,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,3,13,91,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044222825364652,0.0,0.0,0.11317360629482767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15371549724931458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208586875634803,0.0,0.0,0.09300616043582684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618638757184366,0.0,0.18873462870055688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999573605821596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523183169909973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577761798893765,0.2330381423835309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522456275646407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285860434366241,0.16148359476514884,0.0,0.0,0.10329859939339918,0.0,0.0,0.12392103661513172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422611380253262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564817781095925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389798198533685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308299936408313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073599692332503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595710820148493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835411577378212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14480752645073947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576181938844217,0.0,0.11178006696397794,0.0,0.07999642186323591,0.0,0.09025823859701383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3708779257176356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849772763322608,0.09084151755346244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508573271956698,0.362094548445445,0.0,0.0,0.2636124198995002,0.25980065100151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666236103626634,0.0897103340089573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894763386096927,0.1225658042512801,0.0,0.2295554076384314,0.0,0.08028645048047371,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KitKatKiller17,2020/02/13,Eating Disorder The last past year or so I have finally gotten help with my ED. I lost so much weight and everyone would comment on it but I never thought I was skiney enough. I thought I was big cause I was 99 pounds and I needed to be smaller. I got help and it was soooo hard I had to eat and I still am at program and I have to eat 6 times a day and it is so much I've never eating so many meals and snacks in my life. I've gained so much weight and Im about to graduate my program but I'm afraid that I'm going relapse cause I want to lose weight still. And I don't want to eat at all. And if I do eat I want to purge (self induced vomiting) it out. I feel so helpless and I feel like no one really understands that even though I went through a program I'm still not 100% recovered,-0.963385579937306,1.0715462873563233,1.4646603970741907,98.64865203761757,91.87356321839079,5.0027168234064785,18.25391849529781,6.574015621080383,-0.1401862068965518,610,18,150,8,22,206,93,174,0.10099999999999999,0.799,0.099,-0.32899999999999996,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,12,5,0,1,3,0,13,13,0,3,3,34,30,22,0,6,5,0,6,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,13,11,0,6,0,0,2,5,4,0,1,11,6,22,1,15,17,5,19,0,3,0,0,4,6,0,2,12,95,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20757960375601436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515860480183645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11579377606166248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6202983464444235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439518318030053,0.0,0.06673203806192779,0.0,0.0,0.09654236581313312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217170422302188,0.07217874649372243,0.0,0.11067786478182236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05741997973011435,0.0,0.08080616052515675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050666492670914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354419898677775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091341130211053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235623671023871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136333842185927,0.04936013407740772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303125998521467,0.11029060208251597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243267017831777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228149586746437,0.07491546890075694,0.1558473779525373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846328799716697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644843428380824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472500043903326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540055029761623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24205777183019855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926544250335442,0.1604195023659821,0.058913767854235174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10518001064420224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17877750361851993,0.0,0.0,0.3690967675482695,0.0,0.09365957784648576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177169129209371,0.0,0.0,0.06506261655749053
mentalhealth,bestbuyfreak,2020/02/13,"My therapist is wanting to fire me cause I wouldn't let her speak to my attorney, what should I do ? I was framed for a crime which I did not commit and I'm facing trial for it. I have an attorney who is helping me with the case. I'm seeing an therapist and lately she has been wanting me to give her permission to speak to my attorney and have full access to my case files. I don't want her to so I nicely told her not to worry cause my attorney has it under control. She then claimed that if I don't let her then she can't help me and that she would terminate my sessions with her and fire me as her client. I really don't want her to get involved cause my attorney has it figured out already. I only wanted to talk to her about stuff like talking to a friend about issues. She's wanting to get involved in this and I don't want her to. What should I do ? Is she really crossing the line for wanting to fire me when I told her nicely that my attorney has it under control ?",2.9048220064724934,3.851608446601944,4.544640776699031,86.94032686084145,73.75728155339806,7.823430420711974,25.869255663430422,8.238735603445708,1.487378381877022,764,25,166,12,15,258,87,206,0.09300000000000001,0.8190000000000001,0.087,0.5881,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,6,0,25,1,1,5,1,31,41,12,0,13,3,0,3,1,1,4,0,2,0,0,13,9,0,2,1,0,0,1,8,0,0,0,5,6,44,4,27,30,1,10,0,0,1,0,30,5,0,1,5,129,57,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352903751429797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3778269623016935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750090447311221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471921421904082,0.0,0.12810520043333326,0.1176075497351322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435023696575948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279608701021371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13829632717644713,0.0,0.0,0.2507303260259014,0.0,0.05989538207614298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324160227884527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570793395777589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09769504625629097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034582843673976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970798885014227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846923668032089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23429603646717045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.57849366827396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450461903516585,0.0,0.08709038078076263,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,austinseel,2020/02/13,"Do I have a mental illness? Hello, I know that I’m not supposed to just get opinion from people on the internet and supposed to get help from a psychologist, but imo I don’t even know if it’s that big of a deal or if it’s something everyone goes through.

I’m a college freshman and I just moved to NYC from a pretty suburban town. I’ve barely managed to find friends after crying consecutively for like a week of basically talking to no one, but recently I find myself distancing myself from them a little. I have a couple of friends who have been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, etc. but I never feel comfortable bringing it up with them because I feel like their problems kinda overshadow mine and I feel like just pushing my feelings into them might be annoying. 

anyways, ever since the new semester started I’ve been trying to find some more friends, because I thought it might fix the problem of being lonely and such. However, every time I reach out to people in classes and try to be social it honestly just ends up being a dead end. I also thought maybe dating someone might fix my feelings so I’ve been on a few dates but those honestly don’t seem to go anywhere either. It’s just a lot of surface level conversation and I can never bring myself to get beyond that. I honestly feel like I’ve lost my ability to socialize with new people. And to be honest imagining myself being dating someone turns me off because of bad self image. Just thoughts like “does someone like me even deserve to be with anyone” or “I would feel bad for anyone who has to be caught in public with me”

ever since junior year I’ve been super self conscious about how I look and even though people say I have changed and gotten better since then I still feel like it’s something people are just obliged to say and it’s not really something they mean. it’s always at the back of my mind and honestly looking at the mirror sometimes or bad pictures of myself is enough to make me just wanna go home and not be around anyone. I constantly compare myself to other people better looking than me and I know it’s not good to but I can’t help it. In fact I blame a lot of my problems of never dating anyone to being ugly, but I have a feeling it honestly might be just my personality or just something intrinsically wrong with me. I just feel like I’m going to be alone forever. 

I find myself a lot nowadays wanting to do nothing but sit in my room and just sleep or watch YouTube, and I really don’t want to be like that anymore. I want to go out and hang out in the big city, but I can’t without getting into my head about things or just feeling straight up exhausted from social interactions sometimes. 
I’ve lost a lot of motivation to do things I used to love doing and I’m having a lot of doubt about what I even want to be or study.  I also have this looming and overwhelming feeling of being bored of life and just feeling like everyday is just the same shit on repeat until I die. 

Sorry for the long rant and thanks for reading if you did lol. There’s a lot more I can go into detail with but I feel like at that point I might as well be writing a book lmao. Be brutally honest b/c i honestly feel like it might be something that everyone goes through at some point in their life. Thanks y’all <3",5.219873842339389,5.8606114777947935,6.140646466856268,78.72920495150588,68.21898928024503,8.60802158535696,31.014694085903894,8.634040054169528,2.4375634361554734,2617,101,489,39,42,867,267,653,0.146,0.6509999999999999,0.20199999999999999,0.9904,1,3,5,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,6,6,38,50,3,2,26,1,52,9,3,4,6,142,108,47,2,12,40,0,15,12,3,7,5,2,2,3,27,34,0,0,30,2,0,11,14,18,1,1,12,21,66,32,92,71,15,74,0,5,4,1,31,35,1,28,39,359,93,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049781476031058564,0.0,0.07687610174922145,0.0399944378958655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0367700600152084,0.0,0.04766816941011511,0.13443436810392012,0.0,0.0,0.0427885833156396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03695948710314822,0.1203983297039457,0.08790104900586948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08502025189947936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050847042006010826,0.0,0.0,0.05194184868548511,0.0,0.0,0.05318368313627619,0.05279781549239231,0.0,0.04955353325718654,0.041398839379096206,0.04878558227943078,0.04988451449922497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042062539135428914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514372749218614,0.04966462377826628,0.053605860613142,0.12698752809614255,0.08695619193255424,0.0404973493968854,0.0918575001394851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3645512486617926,0.2747046505551052,0.0,0.0,0.17572438668128856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140611293981403,0.0,0.10044918935982534,0.0,0.13658396890432067,0.04031515313006827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049329182690307914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443473027817108,0.0,0.048213725764006315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924680653684976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790032348832616,0.28178914933636445,0.04817436841261608,0.0,0.04253655222851395,0.12108902005853656,0.0,0.10493858225712173,0.24518197618748294,0.04338108954507226,0.0,0.03208416784650478,0.0,0.048288365605651896,0.052357540101854665,0.0,0.0,0.048438829631141926,0.3059400981768396,0.04853256403789447,0.0,0.0,0.0510861365897973,0.0,0.0,0.1112134845264959,0.09284413112213327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046120249039565964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03257050121871919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999358512964848,0.04196903659118123,0.0,0.0,0.09087507507479144,0.0,0.0,0.04890000517105905,0.0,0.13797689182718828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048078617140674726,0.0,0.061584120989584025,0.0,0.04745899110182542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764474044159757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04375712603855271,0.10028582769978094,0.0,0.049338657845092636,0.11928110762671562,0.0,0.0481003223126464,0.14699050875645844,0.12217750587860553,0.1850162738867133,0.09507623445905866,0.05380551509809698,0.03402108608239519,0.0,0.03838525815822233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03863331654790023,0.0,0.08850471156252154,0.0,0.0,0.06386531089551345,0.0,0.04722421768825933,0.11447617584917386,0.0280274436684243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526678803065034,0.05228158118822626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04151325438846568,0.0,0.0,0.11340136823358588,0.0,0.038555332992101884,0.0,0.04321675575139623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0463335327221769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03414443020608955,0.052552198964183054,0.0,0.030952676885259937
mentalhealth,ive_got_wormss,2020/02/13,"My girlfriend of four months shared with me today that she was diagnosed with OCD a few years ago. Does anyone have any advice, knowledge, or experiences they can share with me so that I can better understand this disorder and be a better boyfriend to her. Thanks. My girlfriend of four months shared with me today that she was diagnosed with OCD a few years ago. Does anyone have any advice, knowledge, or experiences they can share with me so that I can better understand this disorder and be a better boyfriend to her. Thanks.",7.372499999999999,8.319332916666667,6.383333333333333,77.795,63.58333333333334,9.733333333333334,30.583333333333336,9.725611199111238,2.7835333333333336,424,14,74,8,6,128,41,96,0.049,0.7020000000000001,0.249,0.965,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,4,2,10,0,0,4,0,10,2,0,0,0,14,14,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,14,10,10,10,2,8,0,0,0,0,12,0,0,2,8,54,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633476694123421,0.23889130604685116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832660323558336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884373664383268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4766933511965195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735320372180385,0.0,0.0,0.30886493981490776,0.0,0.2358371363567455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636180967481956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21510856202880885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24811504676145346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554500149769965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805540916124302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17354612510890435
mentalhealth,kennykoe,2020/02/13,"Why do I only have friends after experiencing significant trauma? Up until relatively recently my life's been rather normal (or so I thought). I've always had little problems here and there but apparently that was normal. However I had the worst social skills I had literally zero friends, even the people I thought were friends I have now realized that I just followed them around and they just accepted it but we rarely talked. 
Some time later shit hit the fan and I realized my supposedly normal life was actually full of abuse, isolation, drama and all the other issues that come along with that. 
I was now more alone than ever and have to deal with a myriad of problems at once. I actually made a little progress at first figuring out my temper triggers and fixing that and a few other little things, but it wasn't enough I was still lonely, I was jealous of ppl with friends, loving partners/parents, my colleagues goofing around with each other and hugs. I wanted those too but they would always seem to resent that I'm there, look very bored or ignore me (sometimes they'd play fight but no one would touch me so I just sat there watching them (yes I did try to take part many times)). I soon began crying myself to sleep at night as my mom shouts at me for some shit, self harming, contemplating suicide all that good jazz, I was also informed I'd be kicked out. Now I'm truly alone I was so depressed I posted my housing predicament in my only group chat on WhatsApp, the company's group which is populated by my only 5 contacts. 

Surprisingly they asked how I was but that ended there for now. An intern dm me and we became friends, she helped me through a rough time for a few months but the depression was still raging on and one day with tears in my eyes at work another approached me and we're all still friends till now. 

Even though I breakdown constantly am a complete mess and push them away sometimes they show me unconditional love and support. which is helping me and develop healthier attachments to them (did I mention I was/am extremely attached to them? ) Even their families have essentially adopted me showing the same unconditional love and support. They trust me so much around their children showing no signs of insecurity (in the cult I was in some families would make their kids avoid me especially girls even if we were the same age like I was some kinda rapist or something even though I weigh like 100 ponds and have noodles for arms ). Despite having nothing to offer  them, they keep helping as long as I keep trying. I've never loved anyone more I feel so safe... 

But why now why did no one care before?? Why do ppl only care about someone when they hear your life's a complete shit show?? And What happens when I'm okay or stable would they leave me and go to someone else?? What if I fail too often would they leave me or stick with me still??😭😭😭 I'm scared to ask them because I feel like that's manipulative towards them. Sometimes I feel like a selfish little shit for wanting to be around them all the time, or when I ask for attention (they say it's ok n I like hugs and validation but it seems so narcissistic if me sometimes).




God this long af 😂",4.671492849668642,6.402834327868852,5.121210324380886,81.46257935123823,70.47540983606558,7.683292640390652,28.388559469829094,8.265842613841098,1.963517963027555,2540,94,473,38,47,809,292,610,0.198,0.632,0.171,-0.9754,4,6,1,0,2,1,59.0,3,1,23,5,47,55,10,3,19,3,40,18,7,5,6,109,78,55,1,16,22,1,5,5,6,5,3,3,0,4,23,37,1,5,13,8,0,5,5,26,0,5,26,12,86,29,57,43,20,65,0,4,3,7,62,25,4,17,39,331,109,2,0.0,0.0684102788429899,0.11268823174245725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959864283226795,0.0,0.046173186135069266,0.09608554977760526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06054349562416642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04037186433868303,0.0,0.0,0.2055968163769652,0.16193215811861755,0.0,0.05424690246480739,0.0,0.0,0.0351966467676843,0.0,0.04913092201526231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773580546363115,0.0,0.0,0.04973631283142283,0.1210747256534667,0.06239443970190114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634226581937725,0.03723633699869233,0.05952550825738485,0.09945958616176598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04823282434419502,0.0,0.051138872657134175,0.059658954235808415,0.0,0.190677552522846,0.05222747179346016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886079841183742,0.0,0.08758244644163862,0.0824963068732767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04911204987195418,0.0,0.0,0.2676501577114205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0328139272194539,0.04842802970449304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05105766469498437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507510322641356,0.0,0.11610201585411845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666220852058625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06026363877366074,0.0,0.10264066001782207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227275058955425,0.0,0.0,0.12234651095935616,0.14103974389850565,0.23147522093784115,0.0,0.10219291035324438,0.0484855131383104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20844377659427976,0.0546332435668185,0.03854067051417505,0.058537432439441074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06762223581550736,0.04608604890027758,0.0,0.042444191445327455,0.0,0.04453122886418597,0.0,0.0,0.054183352389970185,0.16971341511298366,0.05540132225867437,0.0,0.0,0.06148925662064381,0.11737461560084783,0.17564989153089006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252480133766022,0.0,0.04002837061596808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05529719750931901,0.0,0.0,0.11049524388315912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700946796380382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04591570271287215,0.057805971218424665,0.0,0.0,0.1051253057500014,0.06023349368307904,0.0,0.23706956835740225,0.0,0.0,0.05777985836336036,0.058856783547120324,0.09784271214052992,0.04444965682602232,0.2284180685966721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844390784084195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315617636376271,0.13104116073777472,0.0,0.0,0.043411911134110914,0.04640774637091467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03835866830464611,0.0,0.11345489918393847,0.09167530013002784,0.13467034294885327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840084196797475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047640029286659134,0.06811092607819336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20839883721556804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04203406854172048,0.0,0.0,0.2050776633451788,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AbleBag,2020/02/13,"How do I stop hating myself and feeling like I'm not me In my head I'm about twice the size I am and dont look like I do irl at all. I have a lot of hatred for my body. Anything that jiggles shouldn't be there except for my chest or butt. When I look in the mirror I see someone else. I see just a normal person but that's not me, that's not possible. I recently bought clothes with a friend and fit a size M skirt even though I expected to need an xl at least. Does anybody have similar experiences with this and how to at least lessen the hate, its driving me insane",1.1628603104212836,2.778007089430897,2.9692830746489283,93.69033259423506,79.73170731707317,6.098743532889874,20.937915742793788,6.980632752743323,0.2816731707317075,444,12,104,5,11,148,80,123,0.124,0.773,0.102,-0.5647,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,2,0,8,0,8,4,4,2,1,23,19,10,0,4,7,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,1,0,1,1,5,2,0,1,1,5,16,3,14,16,4,10,0,0,4,1,2,6,1,2,5,72,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017484391885314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21620481725926896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703336557480786,0.0,0.2281204875797478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16259949365963872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856005806844426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903984878469141,0.0,0.0,0.09841749637313676,0.13905320607665564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15038092389544114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38433990573670906,0.19976017129283805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901857604699212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269026847715943,0.0,0.0,0.16547876561092625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14432553405859236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19070909862611304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16995501407520724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194310650600396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921867680517767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102110049615585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16492062893524784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16273050693644078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19123604527975352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stephjacobs24,2020/02/13,"Am I crazy? Paranoid or just anxiety? So recently this thing has been happening to me the past couple of weeks. I keep getting these random intrusive negative thoughts. Example being 'someone's watching you' 'somethings going to grab you' 'what if you got in a car accident right now'. They're completely random and it's getting worse and honestly starting to scare me. I'm not already thinking those things and they're not just snowballing in my mind it's literally just a thought like that and then I go back to what I was doing or originally thinking. I've been diagnosed with anxiety, depression, insomnia and migraines. I'm not a naturally anxious person it's mostly social anxiety and I really don't understand what is bringing on these thoughts? Is it paranoia or some sort of psychosis? Maybe just too much stress?",3.730029828486206,6.867181738255037,4.665178970917228,76.35923005219986,80.61073825503355,8.41178225205071,33.109992542878445,8.998388855275968,3.8928699478001487,665,37,105,19,18,215,100,149,0.20600000000000002,0.747,0.047,-0.9713,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,0,8,5,0,2,4,0,10,3,0,1,0,32,27,12,0,1,11,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,14,7,0,1,6,0,0,4,5,3,0,0,7,2,11,2,10,19,3,16,0,1,1,0,5,4,0,9,9,75,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730806068475965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3599543458595762,0.17718841344151398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206029035399691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16444733488113114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17354425371985865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508900213819588,0.15919276307506558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388842005871876,0.0,0.17827545258841865,0.0,0.12544200561603056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869611248801855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940963235119105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766257693213693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15757028994986055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583671365047429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529795548487792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972478529431227,0.0,0.13694961885010887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047790683042156,0.0,0.15486394900404765,0.0,0.0,0.1339434180674154,0.0,0.0,0.15702761837004622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988210820649354,0.13289291519935928,0.12074572231270556,0.0,0.0,0.1110145752745198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17966360013335705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208399589203868,0.20099785249701954,0.0,0.3735484519855916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16327952473149104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581032558219055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983683776426466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dog_Jones,2020/02/13,"Seeking help... again. Hey guys, I don’t know if this is the place to post this, so excuse my ignorance if there is a better sub for this kind of post. 

I am trying to build up the courage to go back to a therapist and maybe get on meds again. But I find that any time I have ever talked to a new therapist, I lie to them. I’ve been locked in a psych ward before (I asked for it because I was going to kill myself and had no one to watch me or help me) and it was the worst thing to ever happen to me and I’m so scared that it will happen again.",3.32806375442739,2.605372479338847,4.7068004722550185,92.10487603305788,72.14049586776859,7.9060212514757975,22.244391971664697,6.868970318607317,0.2734358913813457,414,6,106,3,7,139,77,121,0.138,0.779,0.083,-0.8387,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,1,1,9,7,1,1,7,0,10,0,0,0,2,13,18,10,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,9,4,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,4,0,1,4,1,13,3,16,13,1,16,0,0,1,0,8,4,0,3,8,75,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154869889736514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15876367772693262,0.0,0.0,0.13058512938153793,0.0,0.1035238920313789,0.0,0.1445087737954632,0.0,0.0,0.15019662696291525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072333104176439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521719569745354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887266803257808,0.0,0.19303119873971855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681536907157389,0.3003518035195869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276605615915797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18788646996591007,0.17684685744447687,0.0933315123827999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17061228292045036,0.0,0.18863756090310133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640182781901689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507797994593097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177431233747916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3252912780230294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002469475812845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364990976678281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3943603934125001,0.11282434551929127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902646504429433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530019255291432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LHiggensBPLB,2020/02/13,"Phone Apps Anyone find any useful mental health apps? Trying to work on my mental health this year and wondering if anyone has any personal experience with the apps i've found being mentioned.  

 [https://www.healthline.com/health/depression/top-iphone-android-apps](https://www.healthline.com/health/depression/top-iphone-android-apps) 

 [https://www.banyanmentalhealth.com/2020/02/03/best-mental-health-apps-for-better-living/](https://www.banyanmentalhealth.com/2020/02/03/best-mental-health-apps-for-better-living/)",45.085,58.32975861111112,18.075555555555557,-18.499999999999968,-9.333333333333314,9.155555555555557,25.66666666666667,9.516144504307137,3.3898,474,6,23,5,4,92,30,36,0.0,0.9209999999999999,0.079,0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,64.0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,7,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,1,10,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15668335780627848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611045916703361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24179592042248,0.20377457281439526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269019153753973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052930361562198,0.0,0.0,0.12631364089595853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7347294890648645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.464388264922356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005904159506736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821496380437623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949800771169807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493224239563938,0.08386882250280671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741866598703229
mentalhealth,awigato,2020/02/13,"Worried I may be desensitized to issues with love/relationships? I’m sorry if this is the wrong word to use to describe what I feel (or don’t feel, rather).

In my last two relationships, I’ve noticed that whenever it came to issues, I never really felt hurt or anger anymore. I would react negatively to problems, more because I knew it shouldn’t be happening than anything else.
Looking back past those 2 experiences, I remember issues would affect me and I felt more sensitive to things. It’s easier to leave, I’ve noticed as well.

Quick background: I have been in 3 toxic/abusive relationships. Could this have possibly affected my feelings towards relationship issues?",6.51016666666667,8.53747701666667,7.21166666666667,67.10666666666668,66.33333333333334,10.333333333333336,35.0,10.504223727775694,4.321500000000001,542,26,83,15,9,179,84,120,0.139,0.7929999999999999,0.068,-0.7413,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,1,0,12,0,0,4,1,26,23,5,0,7,4,0,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,7,0,0,1,4,4,1,1,5,6,11,1,13,11,2,9,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,4,5,59,20,0,0.0,0.1379750824468726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548784091828565,0.0,0.0,0.09582903518535647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954342950044293,0.0,0.0709872890705564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318862152102875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297643866577986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727964902481567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391116697678275,0.0,0.0,0.17664297636351728,0.0,0.2236219409223578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297700309048108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466292359496114,0.0,0.0,0.4861772627723429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949228939996936,0.0,0.12330451745650492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778929111064152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051013376481812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981398815956174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651598742450751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116540616310304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128071012856302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11142762931690936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460132469895453,0.0,0.0,0.5000980488584749,0.13191598551816394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303570673065718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736469594039842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375545013996065,0.0,0.0,0.10057604850666052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470319869599548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11826137716302408,0.0,0.16544652637949311,0.12732060133598938,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yanox_,2020/02/13,"Prolonged lack of motivation negatively impacting my work For the past few months, I think it may have well been more than 6, I have really not felt motivated to do anything. I catch myself dancing with deadlines, completely disregarding my plans, and even struggling to maintain social contact.

I remember a time in which I used to be extremely productive. I just feel like I can't live up to myself anymore.

I don't think I'm depressed, far from it. I feel content with my life. But I can't get anything done.

Has anyone ever had this problem before? Or a similar problem?",4.080560747663546,6.6019900000000025,5.345616822429907,75.79506074766357,74.23364485981308,8.392149532710281,32.19532710280374,9.120678840339163,3.3380586915887864,458,23,77,11,10,152,79,107,0.155,0.755,0.09,-0.7873,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,4,4,6,0,1,3,0,12,1,0,3,1,22,20,3,0,3,4,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,8,1,0,2,5,4,1,0,4,3,15,2,12,14,3,9,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,2,5,58,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19302857631961268,0.13609540184073005,0.0,0.32034094818691183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16562258602622695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040742198865496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16764140778889544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991822313784079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855655074486538,0.17606119700659387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19682962277350294,0.13904941248325098,0.18688298502616088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169031166147444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747856207597028,0.09509028594940998,0.0,0.17186890311451694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535817944194089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858039765661402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724845226768281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12469007458876398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22048689001283495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19840891024255106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034778781283829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.249432318114798,0.0,0.0,0.11349497193080947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681047225467619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17500291995845502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14169876826086775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FemerFashiste,2020/02/13,"Mental damage inflicted on me from hospitalization I was hospitalized a few times with the last time being in 2018. The psychological damage these experiences inflicted on me is immense.

I have nightmares multiple times a week about being held hostage or imprisoned.  I have flashbacks and unwanted thoughts every day.

It’s funny all this was done in the name of “helping me” but basically gave me PTSD.",6.7095652173913045,9.576985101449278,7.1935507246376815,63.97119565217396,67.55072463768116,10.397101449275363,34.68840579710145,10.504223727775694,4.584901449275362,328,16,48,10,6,107,53,69,0.11199999999999999,0.836,0.052000000000000005,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,8,0,0,0,1,9,11,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,0,7,0,8,3,2,10,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,1,6,36,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19480918694930047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091209418475289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25450573145730954,0.0,0.0,0.2954809462285263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024701419342966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24622613640237975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3044139912810665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3531019007775675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398086401770804,0.5284156981587146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24230112268754306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FuckThisLimbo,2020/02/13,"How do I motivate myself to keep improving? So, recently my gf left me.

This motivated me to make my life better. Therapy, work, martial arts, the whole nine yards.

Now she's back with me, and I'm slipping. How do I keep the momentum going?",1.0260283687943286,3.5661907872340457,3.784148936170212,81.88416666666669,87.93617021276596,8.239716312056737,24.854609929078013,8.841846274778883,2.607924822695035,185,8,36,6,6,65,37,47,0.0,0.77,0.23,0.8924,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,5,0,9,7,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,2,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,9,1,3,7,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,25,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314148172750723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661690894558263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103892225823225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5350029501776313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32698707384590503,0.0,0.21257249740934372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20088893059853125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29715546980500984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441667824486292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360040565418678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21909787674674389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lillpiffen,2020/02/13,"My Story as a kid Hello! I remember as a kid sometime when I would get sad or stressed I would get these voices in my head, sometimes I could ignore them and sometimes it was horrible... Although I have not had this type of episode for years. I am now 20 and the last time I had an episode was when I was 13. I know most people get diagnosed with schizophrenia when they are older, 22 if I am correct? So was this just me as a child handling stress or is it something worse, a precourser to schizophrenia maybe?

Thanks you for reading, would love all the help I can get! (English in not my native tounge, thanks)",3.8208172635445368,5.129142743801651,3.9888705234159794,90.41037649219469,71.97520661157026,6.700091827364558,28.320477502295685,6.937597516519254,1.2665474747474748,476,18,99,4,9,147,79,121,0.121,0.799,0.08,-0.6179,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,2,0,6,7,0,2,7,0,16,3,1,0,2,19,24,13,0,5,6,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,3,5,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,6,1,18,3,10,14,2,10,0,1,0,1,9,2,0,4,8,72,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130446250509263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658280425116197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3414388363350946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16767580547420866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951068627808916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978979846977961,0.13317713377104853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14745752382489674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16413794343184188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326765442874613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16342498325504706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850785633437275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577849888393436,0.484763277788189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3743042402832884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008381244156323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952686409176896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16649896273988912,0.34818303436368336,0.0,0.0,0.1052118592943686
mentalhealth,qd94,2020/02/13,"Helped a friend and now I feel like I’m drowning A few nights ago I helped a friend & roomate check themself into a hospital for depression/anxiety/suicidal ideation. I was so proud that they finally made this choice as they’ve been struggling with this for the past year and I ended up stay in the back with them for a few hours until they feel asleep. [A little back story - about 5 years ago (19) I was hospitalized twice for very similar reasons but from different causes. I went to group therapy and my own therapist for two years following this and got to a great place.] After that night I’ve been having flashbacks to my own experience, getting anxiety attacks, and just feeling very isolated. I’ve never experienced this before and I don’t know how to come out of this. It’s awful because now that they’re out of the hospital and they’re trying to talk about it I freeze up and don’t know how to respond. Thankfully my other roommate and boyfriend can be there for them but I feel so selfish because of this. Has anyone experienced this before? How did you come out of it?",5.550362269309641,6.580674688995218,5.9278366370471645,79.15235645933016,67.66028708133972,9.416404647983596,31.196514012303492,9.606745405546679,2.8628753246753247,866,34,162,18,14,278,118,209,0.099,0.8,0.10099999999999999,-0.4923,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,4,1,13,9,1,1,10,1,11,1,1,6,1,33,26,18,1,0,3,0,5,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,14,17,0,0,7,0,1,4,3,3,0,2,8,7,17,6,31,17,4,32,0,0,0,0,12,9,0,0,19,112,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284928352047357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13964396094188689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859463690873868,0.0,0.0,0.09011752840340448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14662226717700585,0.0,0.1982051272019092,0.0,0.1571309557657576,0.0,0.21933875646924275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323976648840575,0.0,0.22204144681878069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465461351210095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415149844297998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607165855893127,0.0,0.0,0.2606671332170468,0.09207356905122062,0.0,0.14118430314271355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991483514970569,0.0,0.06733570293747715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307898047971953,0.1420932342324371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277423081336193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269231429827861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166072638891736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296540095426813,0.12917396272905626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219515858271976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940200552397116,0.0,0.0,0.2418946896795253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12303277634067365,0.0,0.0,0.13465461351210095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251251027250013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373714255071571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473580454362735,0.0,0.14097636090237273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359074246942047,0.0,0.11865754227230353,0.14738818736230178,0.1496423297007706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750264842401713,0.0,0.1258993183011257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21268285538480408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947521988216565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489880030867621
mentalhealth,thisismyusername654,2020/02/13,":( feeling depressed I smile and try to be positive and happy but inside I take comfort in that one day, it'll all be over and I'll be at peace.",-0.6901612903225818,1.4351424838709723,1.8970161290322598,95.26552419354843,91.90322580645164,4.390322580645162,20.65322580645161,5.985473137389443,0.08144516129032286,111,4,25,1,4,38,24,31,0.10300000000000001,0.503,0.39399999999999996,0.8898,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,6,6,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,2,4,2,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211740767435408,0.0,0.4289337154715519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518078991480977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5301389677577335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33746323114483723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3744401732818229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381148639280069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carlwheezier,2020/02/13,"I lost weight and still hate my body! So basically, I’ve struggled with my weight for nealry all my life but 2 yrs ago I decided to make health changes and I went from 168lb (76kg) to 135lb (61kg). I’m 5’4 female 20yrs old btw. So yeah, I suppose I’m a little bit more confident in myself than what I was before and everyone comments saying how amazing I look since I lost weight but I just don’t feel that much happier with how I look. Most of the time I look in the mirror and I see no change. I’m still on my journey to my goal weight and I’m still shedding the pounds, but I just feel like no matter how much weight I lose, I’ll never truly be happy with how I look and it’s stopping me from dating anyone. I feel like I’ll never be ready to be intimate with another person because I don’t even feel comfortable with myself. Sorry for the vent.",1.1325565610859734,2.9196199285714317,3.1083710407239837,91.8454524886878,80.48351648351648,6.040594699418229,20.046541693600517,7.048011613610866,0.2999685843568196,665,17,149,8,17,224,103,182,0.16399999999999998,0.6809999999999999,0.155,0.5751,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,4,12,10,1,1,5,1,6,8,1,5,3,32,24,15,0,0,5,0,9,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,11,5,1,5,0,0,2,6,5,0,0,4,15,24,5,18,17,6,16,0,3,5,0,3,4,0,1,12,86,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014015963516453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662859610165187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07110252178306373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061987980601930975,0.0,0.08652888614472512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101681511140754,0.11295229764461227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21514456238107268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671638778831743,0.0,0.0,0.09716711577141804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20566576609521894,0.1452916666733952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082486265419908,0.0,0.10039571731053523,0.0,0.1080894487224245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182514855388386,0.09935911186754336,0.10191795826482526,0.0,0.0,0.3415687940649804,0.11376271372954636,0.22200864067893802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787744162070583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14950456691762326,0.0,0.15685590557721893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670431190065173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878992419949926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086627421856557,0.0,0.0,0.08103206535642092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411725536117283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383124310456284,0.0,0.0,0.24362418862120794,0.08501561106893189,0.0,0.1063062386113994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059295013680348285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6191421427810799,0.0,0.09426567255796024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,onemoorething,2020/02/13,"Is there a way to get medicated by speaking to a psychiatrist over the phone? I'm not afraid to go outside (all the time), but I definitely wouldn't want to go to a office type setting and meet people in person for the sole specific reason of talking about everything I hate.
 I can't imagine the idea of telling anyone what's actually happening in my life or what's wrong with me, sharing or trying to connect. They seem like they're feigning feelings and it makes me uncomfortable. I just want to be medicated without putting myself out there. 
  It sucks to be outside and exist, trying to feel normal and feeling like I can't talk to anyone past the normal work/outside conversation. I see the same people everyday when I work and they know little about how I really feel and what's happening in my life.",6.811175627240143,6.986926490322585,7.494408602150539,72.00605734767026,64.74193548387096,10.243727598566313,34.641577060931894,9.994966539143718,3.460620071684588,646,27,115,13,9,215,93,155,0.11699999999999999,0.785,0.098,-0.4617,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,1,7,7,2,1,9,0,6,4,0,3,1,32,24,11,0,5,6,0,4,2,0,1,4,1,0,1,5,8,0,0,9,0,0,3,5,4,0,0,0,6,15,3,23,21,2,15,0,0,1,0,11,6,1,3,6,75,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.14204639876276545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20355907096865733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308207122109794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943997711089062,0.10398870513256847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604953983878078,0.0,0.16545117866219072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574379697690045,0.0,0.0,0.14371121046393298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16432048952014502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999644011370763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20562787570914212,0.14222736407111247,0.1458902186529191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716300216605897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29327449875396155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852374681989894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389543083033333,0.20182714047139705,0.12709812555293018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632886519236338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325001212019356,0.1496608038452137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599315698640628,0.1325131370838273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23399260578513645,0.12722660463675894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487770612884611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19765253370860386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717111293025836,0.11553943277233795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14031547153673402,0.0,0.2119400746422057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914794630848866,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,keto_emma,2020/02/13,"Please help! My husband told me he thinks he is depressed. I'm looking for good free online resources /courses preferably for men. My husband told me he thinks he is depressed. He's not quite ready to seek therapy, and whilst I can lead a horse to water, he's an adult and I can't make him drink.

However I do think he could respond quite well to online help, online courses, tutorials, videos etc.

Does anyone know of any good resources? (we are UK based if this helps).

We've spoken at length and written a list of things we will do to try and help him, however he gets snappy if I push it too far. He's not one for being told what to do. 

It breaks my heart and I want to stand by him until he gets better. 


His symptoms include:
Zero sex drive
Sitting in silence for hours
Not wanting to do anything
Wanting to sleep all the time
A 'void' or 'black hole' inside him 
A feeling of nothing
Easily irritated 
Losing touch with his friends
Drinking alcohol to feel something
There is no obvious reason for these feelings, we have a wonderful life. 

We are doing the obvious changes like diet, exercise and cutting down on alcohol. 

However I'm looking for some good online materials perhaps geared towards men. 

His aversion to going to the doctors just now is that he doesn't think they can tell him anything he doesn't know already. He's been in funks before and has gotten through it himself (this is true). Our health are system usually is quite crap, so it will likely be a waste of his time. He's very intelligent and self aware, he's likely to be patronised. He doesn't believe all hope is lost, he just wants some patience and understanding.",4.8310525591634566,6.253559009493674,5.302438084755091,81.5176307099615,69.66455696202532,7.774133186571271,31.144193725921852,8.18289091462,2.298290203632361,1301,55,240,18,23,416,181,316,0.08199999999999999,0.7759999999999999,0.142,0.9589,3,0,5,0,0,0,36.0,5,0,1,7,8,18,2,0,10,0,30,15,3,3,5,50,60,14,0,9,8,2,4,3,1,2,7,0,0,4,10,14,6,0,13,4,1,4,8,6,1,2,7,7,26,13,32,47,5,22,0,4,3,1,49,7,1,7,10,138,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21063931942915395,0.0,0.0,0.1087520458777936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701717623543316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890824248008152,0.0,0.16219601423269173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838585372004673,0.11103176580194256,0.0,0.0871592021629192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042525166551637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868391735328792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16976142649019665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086979509589948,0.08624150764279258,0.0,0.0,0.1930823778436309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990896728516332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14948907005556586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613925469104006,0.0,0.10297630278566587,0.0,0.056008066275882014,0.247976441145843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047537239934759,0.0,0.11678187043108405,0.2642231495276327,0.0,0.0,0.09788208969954287,0.0970516043653664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832067697435012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960856842489398,0.14443921821922773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16551385727830173,0.11025190761567244,0.10757864039796626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578269080803953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456109621026247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667798280255939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817797800773224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144592138751019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132550627250417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028088312522915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986208726247068,0.0,0.0,0.07586837469353967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243087356289957,0.0,0.0,0.08613678261065683,0.0,0.11270017202421954,0.0,0.06547204247431583,0.25258667708903304,0.0,0.0,0.11493024658144928,0.0,0.0,0.28250538827985244,0.0,0.06690877814868816,0.0,0.0,0.10259371450054536,0.0,0.0,0.10853857288489847,0.0813138244571437,0.2325086684313454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860801673029416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687294711245866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayy2332,2020/02/13,"Therapy is too expensive i don't know what to do i really need help and i think therapy is the best option for me. my family can't afford it and i'm 15 so i don't have a car to drive to a job, even if i did i'd break down from all the people and stress which is why i need therapy . i have really bad social anxiety and possibly depression and OCD that's causing suicidal thoughts and self harm. also my dad thinks my anxiety is just nervousness that every teenager has so that doesn't really help. i physically get sick every morning before school because of how scared i am. i spend the whole 8 hours shaking and near tears and sweaty because im terrified of being called on or spoken to. i've tried so many times to ""put myself out there"" by talking to people more but it makes everything worse and i feel stuck. are there any alternatives to therapy, if not what do you recommend?",3.0082867783985137,4.779342379888269,4.885229050279332,81.29249906890131,74.92178770949721,9.242607076350094,25.341154562383608,9.725611199111238,2.4637170204841725,702,24,140,20,15,240,116,179,0.18,0.765,0.055,-0.9471,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,1,10,8,0,4,5,0,17,1,0,3,1,28,28,18,1,4,6,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,8,10,0,0,5,0,2,4,5,7,0,0,3,1,17,1,16,24,4,11,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,4,2,91,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977066469637487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308603283380686,0.0,0.1869334782068709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201451277002414,0.1489585895146171,0.0,0.10396548417313374,0.0,0.1282195126820144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475860432919494,0.0,0.0,0.12551167476864528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523274962919812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069819680089706,0.0,0.20588245920152348,0.0,0.10980676979135308,0.0,0.11517965824908365,0.0,0.06177746502527753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383357935208124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16378825929626142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032188223727455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319744816139979,0.0,0.12124398466026465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671464826573267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155555210461353,0.12387051282953833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18118862928101973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16940732072799236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773866890304376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228238230968693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348133359206007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232267458678725,0.1236518540833124,0.0,0.0,0.1274595321507579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12454628871912544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995583912132686,0.0,0.0,0.1336441936127862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820299768315624,0.0,0.0,0.5588901663230135,0.0,0.0,0.15657497170781773,0.0,0.09699662222678124,0.0712436630239207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829516438980096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102477071644619,0.13640869240040726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451102357512946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lowdrone,2020/02/13,I think I'm getting paranoid I think I'm getting paranoid because I keep having a feeling that something behind me. Whenever a car is behind me I think it's following me. I keep seeing things out of the corner of my eye and when I see an open doorway I can swear I see a figure. Some times when I am in bed I imagine and consequently see things coming through the door and approaching me.,4.892658227848102,5.324987886075952,6.106177215189878,79.42584810126583,68.87341772151899,8.345316455696205,33.52151898734177,8.238735603445708,2.6028359493670896,309,14,59,4,5,104,48,79,0.079,0.898,0.023,-0.4019,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,0,4,1,1,0,0,15,20,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,6,0,2,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,6,15,0,7,20,1,11,0,0,5,0,0,4,0,1,3,42,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945224787622445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18292871873846406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737523417314923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22189792113468929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775093761206213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6768914172445267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16348455099814993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821641430986595,0.4082137615852817,0.0,0.0,0.1238284056721386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,privprovimaknob,2020/02/13,"I'm not right. This may end not making much sense or belong here so I apologise now, I just need to get this somewhere that can give me advice.

I dont like to self diagnose but from everything that I've read, watched and from people I have spoken to I might suffer from some sort of mental health issues, most likely the combo of anxietyand depression. I don't mean that in a boasting way as I've seen some people do I'm not very good at explaining what I'm thinking or trying to say.

I get episodes of wanting to isolate myself, not speak, eat or do anything, my interests arent giving me as much enjoyment and any attempt to learn or take in information, whether this is for hobbies or work, is incredibly difficult. 

Would it be the best idea to go visit my GP and try to explain myself or is there a better way to hopefully find something that could help me get put of a rut that's been my life for as long as I can remember because it's getting to the point where its severely affecting my life and relationships and lack there of.

Cheers.",7.7247846889952125,6.1341411196172295,7.974397129186602,75.11527990430622,63.641148325358856,11.422200956937802,35.73253588516747,10.355215969177356,3.458666602870812,830,31,164,16,10,273,129,209,0.13,0.738,0.132,0.3183,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,7,12,0,0,6,0,17,5,0,2,0,41,37,18,0,6,13,0,0,2,0,3,4,2,0,1,12,5,1,0,9,1,0,3,7,3,0,0,2,4,17,9,27,30,7,14,0,2,2,0,11,6,0,13,5,110,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198636768746494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185051071504287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114901865516362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823358755717542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417449759219336,0.11945620036355828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784038361405317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633341330333945,0.13709063808737618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829806796922366,0.0,0.0,0.13820774061949634,0.0,0.0,0.11962968755999505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138993211384995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234492198928191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822687118055406,0.25913804787041184,0.07676195537587889,0.1132881849300298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435704037171332,0.0,0.0,0.0905328775028973,0.0,0.0,0.13415247304921815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524747322549045,0.0,0.14097534621181554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19080429582734704,0.13197428585681684,0.0,0.0,0.11953045991423225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901585845052896,0.0,0.0,0.14712807034128506,0.0,0.0,0.1361162407430926,0.14328524028317632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19858026184442235,0.10015081697611554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18727755312204414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276824160556758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578011242861054,0.0,0.0,0.13510402037268998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501191432864255,0.15300511277101156,0.11534688069838694,0.0,0.10741107271695444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409048274932678,0.1525877947663543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398153658759288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015539274824326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654578047626295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834038910468812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144480749747183,0.07966629281003013,0.21442054035125074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098330726221434,0.0,0.0,0.0959480548427578,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,boopitysnoots,2020/02/13,"How to know you're approaching your breaking point? Hello! So, I appear to have this habit of not taking steps to get out of unpleasant situations until it is too late and I am moments away from my breaking point. Who else feels this way and how do you manage it?

As a more specific example, I work through a temp agency and sometimes the jobs I get are alright but over time I find myself being not totally satisfied or I'm kinda stressed but I feel like I can deal with it until one day I just progress very rapidly from ""hmm, maybe I should think about whether this is the right thing for me"" to me barely being able to keep myself from breaking down and crying at work long enough to make it to a bathroom. Like, within the span of a couple hours. 

This is somewhat problematic because it has caused me to have to quit jobs very abruptly which I feel is inconsiderate to my employers and I worry that this hurts my chances of getting future employment.",4.526332046332048,6.115222162162166,4.935463320463324,83.21385135135138,70.62162162162161,7.664092664092664,28.349420849420852,8.192908349453996,1.9026988416988413,760,28,144,11,14,241,119,185,0.14300000000000002,0.787,0.071,-0.9451,4,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,4,6,5,0,1,7,1,14,0,0,4,1,30,27,15,0,1,7,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,14,7,0,1,6,0,0,3,2,2,0,1,0,3,21,3,30,24,4,27,0,1,0,0,5,10,0,4,12,107,35,7,0.1500576885350062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098413797568493,0.0,0.0,0.0914737741458298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541505814181368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660359782211333,0.16483132468948564,0.09677479514223876,0.1547028878685989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253539437889656,0.0,0.0,0.15504970520524908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276210281570749,0.10720124267235233,0.0,0.0,0.137150008796755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351968465705377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477765963874618,0.0,0.16063985914365803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29781820317962104,0.13337816830422572,0.0,0.0,0.08246778127125674,0.0,0.1692716087203392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14662121382316454,0.0,0.0,0.13279633231340265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016467231416436,0.0,0.150753117257601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168297327482356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28370603719376764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15960482272295998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281484461076148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686711290840357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14841089092628176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17189057522484225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282470686856752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969166052078586,0.09615090774933233,0.0,0.0,0.08749984491672742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476266167076852,0.0,0.11910880854861365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184875688638588,0.15239086668083787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bruhmomentum43,2020/02/13,"Sometimes terrified at night, cant sleep Sorry if this isnt the right sub, this was my first tought of where to submit this.

Im 15(M) and sometimes I have trouble sleeping because sometimes I freak myslef out. I like watching videos or reading about creepypastas or cryptids, but sometimes I cant sleep because of them. I know this sounds fucking stupid, but I mainly fear stuff like Slenderman, the rake, or just any image of a creature used in screamers. I know these things arent real but sometimes I start thinking about it at night and I just cant stop, my mind just going through all these creepy images I have seen. I just fear that when I open my eyes that thing is by my bed and just staring at me. Or that my TV just turns on with that face on it and loud screaming comes out of the speakers. I try to calm myself but my fucking mind is just telling me that it can happen. How can I make this stop?

PS: If you plan on commenting something like 'Grow up shit kid', please dont. Thanks",3.0606658704090752,4.986301187817258,3.0654523738429416,93.72471782621679,75.19289340101524,5.447476858763808,25.293819050462822,5.900188976854957,0.527426037623171,782,27,163,4,17,236,113,197,0.16399999999999998,0.742,0.094,-0.9563,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,1,2,12,14,4,2,4,0,13,8,6,3,1,38,27,16,0,2,17,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,1,1,18,9,0,2,3,3,0,3,6,9,0,1,2,8,25,5,21,25,2,23,0,0,4,2,5,13,3,6,10,108,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683734564662563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775579648221412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733122353109888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242390563814513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542912232274097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610957531893302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20891560558566352,0.0,0.0,0.06421504738308742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991703631604436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204901972624815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419313622101055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656042041558192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542196844321823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281761852666101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21206766979319006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12402952727122556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302097539589367,0.12860781034101348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649318302625956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159830204363148,0.0,0.0,0.3392159967117477,0.0,0.0,0.0869855290455082,0.5587519668094123,0.1264835005606,0.07997518567993503,0.0,0.0,0.18893006519167094,0.0,0.0,0.1293469736687927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875858862050893,0.10402637828226892,0.0,0.0,0.15013160029651446,0.07239968506372715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767130637576156,0.12290110765548558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975874262172344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,J0hnny-1O-t0ez,2020/02/13,"So I'm finally getting help after 6 years of just trying to suck it up, but there's a problem It seems like every psychiatrist office I reach out to is no longer accepting new patients and I've called about 20 different doctors and it's the same story. Does anyone know how I can go about getting in to see a doctor?",3.4027692307692305,4.809440661538467,5.092307692307696,81.70769230769233,73.15384615384616,7.661538461538463,26.84615384615385,8.238735603445708,1.8201384615384617,253,9,49,4,5,86,53,65,0.124,0.732,0.14400000000000002,0.09,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,11,10,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,2,10,10,1,8,0,0,1,0,2,3,1,1,5,29,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435941273693326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546260506362493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605297742875255,0.0,0.5104642812766458,0.2182179966422976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100978836835827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731634191457332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260562264154674,0.0,0.14171793087331794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714180889339106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370426014708915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12182547088937888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24083496514837915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386053523819048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19870889209124695,0.22700941453424497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16930014240782912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058068008853454
mentalhealth,throwawayiceberg4456,2020/02/13,I want to know what's wrong with me I can't tell if I just have severe anxiety or I'm schizophrenic. I get paranoia about so much crap. Like that my parents are out to kill me by poisoning my food and that they wait till I'm out with my friend to reach my room looking for secrets and drugs like fucking fbi agents. And my friends working with them to get me out of my house so they can search. At night I get paranoid that my family is plotting against me with my friends to hurt or even kill me. I feel I literally can't trust anyone at times cause I'm scared if I tell anyone anything they'll either freak out or go to the cops. Please help me,1.8462895377128952,3.5390244744525567,2.7296532846715347,95.82664537712894,77.97810218978103,6.026520681265208,23.095498783454985,6.816661863887847,0.41445060827250657,511,16,119,5,12,161,82,137,0.244,0.619,0.13699999999999998,-0.9602,1,0,1,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,4,1,5,15,5,1,1,0,7,6,1,1,0,24,20,11,2,3,7,1,1,2,3,1,3,0,1,0,4,11,1,1,3,0,0,1,2,9,0,0,0,2,26,6,22,19,2,11,0,1,1,1,12,7,2,5,5,73,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240527515946882,0.0,0.0,0.22376188415035952,0.0,0.13167251275083852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437174585474645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18555786402132254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10568342363324944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508408006526298,0.0,0.0809045835728275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19348166559421426,0.0,0.3708641188838024,0.14792432595985308,0.25079189409908803,0.0,0.0909359315116198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072496330746196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184627135207696,0.171291303985941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3540491128134807,0.0,0.0879359199272469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563431332774725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343659743182826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762389977052587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501561696365063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177669357750754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17564015066545405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601953891262642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18076289467142076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797071595198765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330164141236157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437655035340614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648734247811987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749430480065949,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anotherthrowaway3102,2020/02/13,"Why does everything feel hazy? Everything feels hazy and far away like I'm dreaming. I've been having trouble concentrating because my head feels so cloudy. 

I've been getting waves of anxiety out of the blue as well. I'll just be reading or doing work when I'll suddenly feel really anxious, fidgety, and find it hard to breathe like I've been forced into a small stuffy room.

Other than the anxiety, my emotions have been really flat. I wouldn't say that I feel no emotions, it's more so that they seem muted if that makes sense? I have plenty to be excited about but I'm just not feeling much of it.

I've also been having really vivid dreams and waking up exhausted in the morning. The fuzzy, haziness is usually worse in the mornings too.

This has happened multiple times before and last time, a couple months ago, it lasted about 2 weeks. I just want to know what's wrong with me and work my way from there.",3.0157435558493053,5.355308730337079,3.807012557832123,86.41746530072705,76.86516853932585,7.109583608724389,24.515532055518843,8.124751697461798,1.5569744877726377,726,25,139,13,17,231,118,178,0.146,0.787,0.067,-0.9029,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,12,7,0,0,7,0,15,4,3,1,0,27,29,13,0,3,7,0,7,2,0,1,1,1,1,0,10,8,0,0,9,3,0,0,3,3,1,0,5,10,9,4,18,21,2,20,0,0,2,0,2,9,0,3,12,81,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278911067799606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077393250235416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21193395885339394,0.1564875199684144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13014355765963315,0.0,0.0,0.08444015455089869,0.0,0.11786982650875552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326910683329786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121928050579958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3116314132702636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489846511605684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4202374937755665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12660424310242666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237068132278295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249226826377298,0.0,0.12408619499244593,0.0,0.14216089082034666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612665226771001,0.22582363532113614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13534718635234974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246279045253268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056488186120886,0.0,0.10182771413105228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855690829176484,0.0,0.2662172680388056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101562049072191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610288024498406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615435789534429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15255957452331534,0.0,0.08170234458141648,0.10995027040410857,0.11111192574267424,0.0,0.12454559676276443,0.0,0.12499223391123572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20168757935911005,0.0,0.14116312605044934,0.0,0.1514492438729219,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scottb2234,2020/02/13,"Just came out! As depressed As the title says. Just brought up to a close friend that I'm really down, can't believe how it feels to bring it up to someone after 7 or so years of sitting silently. It's not like I'm cured but it's made me realise that maybe 20% of how I felt was caused by hiding it. I made this post just to encourage people that are in the same boat as me to actually mention it. It's difficult, I get that (has taken me the best part of a decade to it) but it's the first step to not feeling like this. I'm calling the doctor tomorrow and hopefully I can move on from this horrible phase of my life.",2.2893233082706743,3.2835221804511256,4.058654135338347,89.65279323308273,75.3157894736842,7.4252631578947375,25.33007518796993,7.908726449838941,1.1983840601503757,482,16,111,7,10,163,83,133,0.14,0.7490000000000001,0.111,-0.2627,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,6,8,0,0,7,0,5,2,0,5,0,22,19,10,0,1,8,0,3,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,16,4,0,0,3,0,0,5,3,2,0,1,7,4,8,6,23,12,3,18,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,2,6,75,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.1933498558415772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232287681839786,0.20792903595452555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023166036322052,0.22661210582244226,0.0,0.2035378312535352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17065221761923302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20279818071518066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003646477471321,0.1415467151695564,0.1902393701571432,0.0,0.0,0.16853237673528915,0.0,0.0,0.15307756219463567,0.0,0.10351665154992257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967914150791644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399476525686977,0.19359618110280155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.374957690060983,0.0,0.0,0.19905187680149636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21058470791454045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21455942893467286,0.0,0.13736092169515635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18975726216567765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692948612359267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756382655268306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16787799395731182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759157094602824
mentalhealth,Brave-Opening,2020/02/13,"I wish I'd never opened the Tinder Pandora's box I can't think of anything that's fucked my self esteem more recently than Tinder

I don't get it. I'm not bad looking, I'm in okay shape but the 3 times I've used Tinder I've got about 2 matches each time and none of them replied when I spoke to them

I told myself for so long that it's obviously my location, or that Tinder just doesn't really work for boys, but every single time I meet up with my friends that lie just gets blown away by the fact they all have hundreds of matches who speak to them

It's not like they're significantly better looking than me, we live in the same area so it's not location, the same age.. I can't keep telling myself that it's not something to do with me. There's something that puts people off me that doesn't put people off my friends, but I don't know what it is so I can't even fix it

I've not had the app installed for 2 months now but it still fucking hurts so bad when I see all their phones buzzing with Tinder chats",4.9593425076452595,4.174945041284406,5.514266055045873,87.88482415902142,68.77064220183486,8.551070336391437,27.79969418960245,7.492282038375204,1.2282006116207955,801,21,187,7,12,259,118,218,0.049,0.848,0.10300000000000001,0.8805,0,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,5,2,13,10,2,0,6,1,11,2,0,1,5,31,28,12,0,1,12,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,2,17,7,0,1,2,1,0,2,14,5,0,0,4,5,25,5,22,24,8,23,0,1,3,2,18,9,2,1,13,113,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12738106973961036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14543268507486862,0.0,0.2584906073761991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690142093424928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223901158187627,0.0,0.13041938956048485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23918466203015956,0.28620641449947426,0.16174542474082906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380173334660766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16570861361254755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13758672021810506,0.0,0.0,0.0850699308067856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562381527954891,0.0,0.1366846471399381,0.13698652524841856,0.25997349314135954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235539271649151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938554809841075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146273115457185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112185097050782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916406364484563,0.0,0.1528389571375895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334961186858327,0.0,0.16148237631546444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383337167337317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12361752094081485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529550112289024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918480821426222,0.0,0.0,0.2707823214566655,0.0,0.0,0.14791090371540666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369105328234654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800377965739245,0.0,0.0,0.11269081136216692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Geek_Queen2016,2020/02/13,"I am not suicidal anymore, but sometimes by brain will have a suicidal thought totally unprovoked and out of the blue. Why is this? Does anybody else have this? I was suicidal for years, most of my life to be totally honest. And I have finally in the last couple of years achieved stable mental health. So why just out of the blue for no reason my mind will just think “Hey I wonder how fast it will take for us to die if we jumped off the roof right now.” Or “I wonder what the blast of a shotgun in the mouth would feel like.” 

Anybody else going through this? I’m kind’ve worried...",2.3915335968379448,4.581737513043478,3.1603162055335967,91.02537549407114,78.21739130434783,6.616600790513835,25.23715415019763,7.686295010490155,1.295260869565217,454,17,94,7,11,143,77,115,0.062,0.757,0.18,0.9468,0,0,0,1,0,0,13.0,2,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,8,0,11,4,2,2,2,23,19,7,4,2,6,0,1,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,6,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,3,9,2,17,12,3,14,0,0,2,0,3,6,0,5,7,65,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14990037623139818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16873360380744434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16724481368079486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15687003684197912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13227255251616088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525331822385705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07642607915829723,0.10798172811201727,0.0,0.1655776483168599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859021379645878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606655871043141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573996664371685,0.0,0.12320758107855725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676185138938772,0.07384434943024291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523238436837476,0.0,0.15261860689810866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554075724785463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908143898912808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949140582114814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4960013355639489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364613429562193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685094052542884,0.0,0.11999636963669882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818150715997759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727790786275982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32783187344176684,0.0,0.153500358041361,0.0,0.10737276042770487,0.0,0.0,0.19467153733345607
mentalhealth,Kamikazecam1234,2020/02/13,"CHECK THIS OUT https://www.etsy.com/shop/PositiveDaysCo amazingly cheap digital planners to help you better guide your life in all diff kinds of aspects! check it out:

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Ill even email you lots of goodies/tips/tricks!!",21.006761904761905,27.357985485714288,10.874285714285717,37.87904761904761,37.00000000000001,9.23809523809524,34.52380952380953,9.725611199111238,3.82252380952381,272,8,26,4,3,65,31,35,0.071,0.764,0.165,0.5684,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,3,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,6,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,0,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806852319980297,0.4269260759764649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107386077251845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23206193111326065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355010474381961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3658747028749141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481673661682167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29870336465985137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4269260759764649,0.0
mentalhealth,brotherbobby420,2020/02/13,"comment maybe? i can barely focus, remember stuff, i constantly keep staring off looking at nothing, and i keep falling asleep.

sometimes when i get angry i get thoughts about stupid things like my dad hitting me after being home late i get serious thoughts about murder and shit .

i am not depressed or sad, in my opinion anyone who commits suicide deserves to die they do it to them selves.",5.250469483568075,7.619895760563381,4.979929577464791,80.4354342723005,70.26760563380283,6.423474178403758,35.77699530516432,7.1686216300943375,2.7698713615023483,313,17,49,3,6,96,57,71,0.284,0.598,0.11800000000000001,-0.9545,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,2,0,3,7,3,0,0,0,4,2,2,0,1,11,13,4,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,2,2,12,1,8,9,0,8,0,2,2,0,5,3,1,2,5,33,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457048373512342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251858277368684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794782463245777,0.0,0.2162665745067882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3266114090651919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090231291186231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37043720716138573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350628396809777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180442880910494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749875543631904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20934671857391726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999471855207067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23605504677517364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21390009765628645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20609413311804745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385463854555481,0.22793498778283303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843907428825775,0.0,0.0,0.3308624685378357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clintenzo,2020/02/13,"Advice on sibling’s mental health Hi Reddit, not sure where to start but I have a sister (40) who may be showing signs of mental health issues. Context on her; after my father divorced my mom, sister was 12 years old at the time, she started experimenting with drugs. Mainly pot but it turned into shrooms/acid and eventually brief heroine use. She cleaned herself up got married and had a daughter. She was in a bad car accident and had multiple surgeries to get back to normal. Eventually was hooked on opiates and her husband divorced her due to having a zombie for a wife for several years. Over the following years she hasn’t held a steady job (no job in past 2 years) and she sells her over prescribed meds for money. She has 3 DUI’s and is one slip up from going back to jail for a long time. My mom moved back in with her to help support but couldn’t take it anymore and moved out last December. 

My sister met a man who was wealthy but was a train wreck. Sister started drinking again and the wheels came off. Told me this guy had her gang raped and it was filmed. Then it turned into her house and phone being bugged and people were out to get her. I’ve repeatedly asked if she has proof but it just goes back to the “these people know how to hide evidence”. She would cover all windows with sheets in her house and tell me not to use my phone when in her house or they could hack my phone. She eventually stopped seeing this guy and seemed to be getting back on track. She has been seeing a new guy for about 6 months now.

Sister texted me yesterday that her shower had cameras and that her whole house is bugged. She’s saying this new boyfriend is in on it. 

Sorry for the long message. My mom and I don’t know what to do. We have been saying for years that she needs to seek professional help. Any advice on how to get her on board with seeking help? I’m also not sure how to approach this from a legal perspective if this is actually happening. I’m lost and don’t know who or what to believe. But deep down the only thing I keep going back to is that my sister needs mental health support. Thanks for hearing me out at the very least.",4.131640099720478,5.364025187353628,4.4559401677117165,87.64904132356277,71.13114754098359,7.008506459167485,25.015411346981946,7.233258080335977,0.9537360278008612,1693,48,347,16,31,531,208,427,0.07200000000000001,0.857,0.071,0.1965,3,0,2,0,2,1,36.0,1,0,1,1,16,8,1,0,18,0,35,6,0,5,4,65,73,32,0,8,14,13,0,0,0,2,4,3,3,4,22,27,1,3,4,3,2,9,8,3,0,1,19,5,43,5,60,47,4,70,0,1,2,1,65,28,0,6,33,229,65,4,0.0,0.0,0.07081651148141273,0.0,0.0,0.14182644421188664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05803310453110212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04934915462105528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196857788672954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678418698935975,0.0,0.0,0.33480476709962353,0.060591772077377634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175999178419348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299917640978778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794014343452355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108962697363322,0.08415656792511364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098604171271519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516564491055831,0.0,0.08248484576446427,0.0,0.05803976001963335,0.0,0.0,0.21556304888489305,0.06417219690428765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314111700704057,0.0817901163862374,0.0,0.14592366233129173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3349378077156606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574279232422705,0.14402632889791112,0.06450232971286643,0.0,0.0,0.11964545815580728,0.0591531163430822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284419020060436,0.0,0.0,0.0792172284351668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060738480652371,0.0,0.21939632208602006,0.0,0.0,0.25497449547201073,0.057923585464334126,0.15425793126071935,0.0,0.10761743432679456,0.0,0.140174463686686,0.0,0.0,0.0711018463599998,0.0,0.0,0.07614856633508621,0.0,0.049174379523619964,0.05519171065144862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927496546948145,0.10061989698397003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154189692416001,0.0,0.0,0.11565559993128588,0.0660637522349826,0.0,0.08198189230076243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123463627808827,0.15409334240087882,0.0,0.0,0.06067062130561295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16470003514001222,0.13679014364747086,0.0,0.05456257598015972,0.0,0.06342817830283437,0.06681144153689961,0.0,0.0,0.04821137100839276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846306995875069,0.0,0.0,0.06934243264506387,0.0,0.0,0.15786765442634393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535198723842475,0.0,0.05987671700562206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102028010398185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05155067029201914,0.0,0.0,0.23365908160371954
mentalhealth,candleburner68,2020/02/13,Tired of people not allowing themselves to feel I am so tired of something emotion inducing happening (usually bad) and if i get emotional about it the people around me say “well you cant do anything about it” “there is no reason to cry over this” WHY IS IT SUCH A CRIME TO ~FEEL~ THINGS. PROCESS THINGS. COPE WITH THINGS. I think the world would be a lot better of a place if we all did. It is just so frustrating sometimes. Sometimes i feel like i just feel things that happen to others or myself more than the average person. Or it could just be the people around me. It is so exhausting and i just needed to rant. Thank you,2.14076923076923,4.5914891056910605,2.969918699186992,90.62178236397749,80.70731707317074,6.386241400875548,21.65666041275797,7.61054688173877,0.9152619136960602,492,15,99,8,13,155,77,123,0.18600000000000005,0.7290000000000001,0.085,-0.9428,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,2,0,1,14,7,1,0,7,0,12,3,0,3,1,28,22,9,0,5,9,0,4,1,0,1,3,1,0,1,13,6,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,1,5,12,4,15,17,3,6,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,5,2,80,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151590505674094,0.24915330439903466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168444141146178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12376593859939145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173104666221577,0.0,0.1537179917589362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31482829759077285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830323455109763,0.09997347147879547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311309908470713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474977209827759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836782565635753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897234965607567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376405600396234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910512230031317,0.1221905861196715,0.14620796502361486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388206955398522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128624709577499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077329802354602,0.276809327975968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12883834677359934,0.0,0.0,0.3718808152330853,0.0896681772889307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3216818774792033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15412461351158374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125823253149523,0.0,0.1262744721444838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940966670845547,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,J-dude720,2020/02/13,"I feel like a complete failure and Im destined for nothing good. Im a 21 year old male and a college student. I work part-time 20-25 hours a week and I suffer everyday from no motivation, ocd, intense anxiety, depression, dissociation, bad adhd, and alcoholism. Ive never taken a break from school as my parents wont allow that and Im financially dependent on them because college is super important in my family. Everyday is a chore to get ready in the morning as I just want to sit in bed all day but somehow I get myself out of bed to go to class or work. Class seems like an eternity to get through as I have no interest in the subjects im studying no matter how interesting the topic is to me even when its part of my major and I often just leave early cause I cant handle sitting for longer than an hour without going absolutely stir crazy. So I often take a lot of bathroom breaks and miss a lot of information in class. I procrastinate a lot as I become completely overwhelmed by all my school work so I end up not doing it. For some reason I always find a way to pass the class as I do things last minute and pull late night study sessions which just make learning things so much harder. Ive got more than 50 hours of credits and Ive only failed one class over a span of 3 years in college so I take that as a win as Ive been struggling with being drunk all the time so it was hard to get anything done. Ive also been taking adderall for adhd as it helps me tremendously but they make my heart race and so I get anxiety about heart problems all day everyday and convince myself that im going to have a heart attack and die at any minute. I take lexapro and abilify for my crippling depression and daily suicidal thoughts that never have completely gone away. Its like I have anxiety about being not successful in life but at the same time I dont want to live anymore and everyday has become a living hell unless I smoke weed or drink. And I thought drugs could've been causing this but Ive had the same issues way before I even started or touched drugs so I was sober most of my life having video games as the only escape. Now I feel stuck I keep missing assignments, I leave class and miss quizzes cause I have no mental energy to learn the information as it requires more hours and attention than it should take. Im not drinking all day everyday anymore as I still struggle with urges but I can manage days without alcohol and weed as Im doing it now but I still feel the same as I have for many many years. Im getting sick of all this anxiety and depression as its making it impossible to want to live anymore but I feel like its jusy an excuse for being lazy as thats what my parents tell me as mental issues are no reason to be failing school to them. Any advice?",5.632941176470588,5.632298176470593,6.499893048128342,78.74042780748665,67.23529411764707,9.438146167557932,31.616755793226385,9.178173031916092,2.6096638146167552,2211,82,434,37,33,735,257,561,0.192,0.7170000000000001,0.091,-0.9965,2,0,7,0,0,2,27.0,0,0,3,10,24,28,2,3,27,0,37,13,3,12,8,94,73,57,2,5,19,2,6,4,0,2,7,0,3,1,22,23,5,2,16,5,1,6,15,16,0,1,13,6,54,12,74,54,19,61,1,10,0,0,12,15,1,13,38,289,76,28,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015924706201842,0.052916254657221606,0.0,0.11574304778501734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043304964105693705,0.04505841628540671,0.0,0.0,0.07364980339336473,0.0,0.16570310854909384,0.0,0.16111131951172852,0.0,0.0,0.04456210045861806,0.0,0.0,0.06160519024030262,0.0508771510203262,0.0,0.045214270994324506,0.03301027398145485,0.1196122349977672,0.0460789690390158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16688563387253355,0.0,0.0,0.17033056696128152,0.0,0.0,0.0432355954757869,0.0,0.0,0.13969304456823284,0.0,0.13992191689251174,0.0,0.05620074537249209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055415822763172834,0.0634651973773588,0.10609577996057197,0.1255971805300284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04796218823506393,0.0,0.0,0.0715331581720052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05104924916759488,0.0,0.1095225755297068,0.07737173686799513,0.0,0.0,0.04949352324440221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16975165652376434,0.0,0.09232669819980344,0.045419739541640636,0.043309930507099935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04850914018102393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925094941394574,0.036296633392763206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133134214849437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4679436142175391,0.11304027001029282,0.0,0.04813237367737723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044140729686522766,0.061085291749654526,0.1146773163951845,0.0,0.0,0.07649766324049423,0.1058228215680721,0.0,0.14345039626653355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13811309934520094,0.0,0.0,0.10843971314932177,0.1098023170077112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10914402425560853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03980761001977018,0.0,0.08353000643727883,0.0,0.0,0.05081754859865903,0.0,0.05195985966404143,0.0,0.056822928197364175,0.0,0.03669448252675928,0.0823693672087415,0.0,0.0,0.12025774557046767,0.11728167381486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051815707023256496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113535967180525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16441273758991165,0.0,0.049297524961638174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0383287361901063,0.0,0.086490973860882,0.0,0.0,0.11322188683755552,0.0,0.05923299168666956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20357608070654507,0.0,0.047330829651232836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195174919121566,0.0,0.0,0.08598054225446396,0.06315239271599818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958199375843428,0.0859659381174366,0.04343709614081593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440029740161352,0.0,0.11826889035276728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10461544206785107
mentalhealth,dasiapollard,2020/02/13,"Overcoming generalized anxiety disorder! I’ve struggled with GAD for a while now and everyday I try to find new things to work towards overcoming it. if anyone have any suggestions, please feel free to leave feedback!! [GAD: things i do everyday to overcome it](https://www.dasiapollard.com/gad-things-i-do-everyday-to-overcome-it/)",7.247610062893081,11.136472283018874,6.334245283018872,65.3823742138365,71.45283018867924,11.080503144654088,37.135220125786155,10.504223727775694,5.640801257861638,273,15,37,10,6,83,37,53,0.179,0.7070000000000001,0.113,-0.3129,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,3,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,7,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,5,19,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20457970617961774,0.0,0.2301397403531765,0.0,0.0,0.21035246173913666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34478565298905384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15211239738299845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749598770564023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185433037518132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905505759431234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302290576699343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145005047551265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3997259199737278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20424880520792027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190131652203738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Therapythrowaway1432,2020/02/13,"Thinking about changing my therapist I've been seeing my therapist for 2 years now. Here are her pros. She and I worked through my suicide attempt last year. After 2 years of seeing her, she knows me very well and can very quickly hone in on my issues at the moment. She also is available on Thursdays, my go to therapy day.

Here are her cons. First her office is a 35 minute drive for me. Second she is constantly overbooked. Her next available booking is April 2nd. I have appointments before then, but I had to book *those* back in January. What if I have an emergency and want to book something next week? Not gonna happen. Finally I feel that although we have become comfortable, I feel like I've become too comfortable with her. My last 6ish sessions (3 months) have been rather bland. Kinda just telling her about my last 2 weeks and then running out of things to talk about.

My logic is with a new therapist, I can revisit old topic, book appointments much sooner than 2 months in advance, and get a second opinion on my life issues.

The problem is this. First off, I don't want to change offices. My town has a HUGE therapist office but its very much a ""churn out as many people as possible in as short of a time."" You also can't book online. Most importantly, my psychiatrist is located in my current office, which I feel like having the psychiatrist and therapist in the same office is a huge advantage for your mental health. So I want to continue going to the office thats 35 minutes away. Obviously I can't just stop going to my therapist and see one of her co-workers. They are bound to find out, so I have to say *something*

So do I change my therapist? Am I just overreacting because my sessions have been rather bland lately? If I change, How do I go about telling my current therapist (I see her in two weeks)? Can I go to my new therapist first then just mention to my current therapist that I went to see one of her co-workers?",3.445187782076083,5.5440673856383,4.450976789168281,83.44515151515155,74.61170212765956,7.642682140554483,27.351386202450037,8.484438967287268,2.0787900709219858,1531,60,289,29,33,497,176,376,0.026000000000000002,0.872,0.102,0.9775,3,0,2,0,0,1,51.0,1,2,1,7,23,7,0,0,13,0,32,2,0,1,1,43,54,24,1,8,11,0,3,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,9,13,0,2,7,5,0,9,4,1,1,8,5,9,57,6,49,48,4,68,0,0,5,0,23,20,0,5,41,207,66,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652064072035524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669898723992368,0.04640393171246746,0.0,0.03678761616414293,0.13329937800895506,0.05135175270581109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553609749445801,0.0,0.0,0.06521481190184747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038919505085475314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154137448598744,0.08622532970953023,0.0,0.06610834799679872,0.055157031921305784,0.153996082494642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031529369648835064,0.0,0.1714859610569109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053365588586727054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414716389180931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597538774037326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03316571456294062,0.14757516600667328,0.06807523825532145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042625618229133216,0.058966025902115964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611834590388819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06081664867702918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633848864386456,0.0,0.08872553306536685,0.0,0.0,0.11656906137444376,0.12836168911428492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332513547211578,0.0,0.08178681214791762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04183774504474407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803336818744404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0577449415389928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04799119809501018,0.0,0.0,0.2404479455834134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929177671234827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05045367888410456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601098081304183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048505483258240216,0.10549372567572067,0.0,0.06901326396685394,0.7006874692656501,0.04009256834814775,0.0386685989634288,0.0,0.0,0.03518943805780805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05895128397097656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14938040458916002,0.10678454491790257,0.0,0.1452227165104146,0.0,0.05426015185560715,0.05594325457682353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13180231539129314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658651272620005
mentalhealth,Noimgay,2020/02/13,"I feel like a failure I’ve posted on this subreddit before but I deleted it after I made an edit. It’s a long story and I don’t want to get into it but I just feel like I need to post this here. I feel like a failure. This is not the way I wanted to start off the new year andI was doing great in 2019; My grades in school were getting better, I actually felt like I was getting better and I was finally accepting who I was as a person. But now I feel like I’m relapsing into my old habits. I’ve started lying again and my grades have taken a huge plunge. I feel like the only reason why I’m even getting by is because my teachers love me. But I feel like I failed them. I’m not turning homework because school is stressing me the fuck out. I’m struggling to pay attention while not falling asleep in class. I’ve lost all interest in any hobbies I used to have and now the only thing that makes me feel useful is playing strategical and team based games like siege and apex. Everyday is getting worse and I can’t control my thoughts or life anymore. Everything is going horrible and I don’t know why it keeps getting worse. I want to die at this point. I don’t feel like I’m worth being around anymore. I just want to get better again.",2.5393978136001465,4.0655072607003895,4.059121734296834,87.75808041504543,75.6147859922179,6.6073003520474325,25.467667222531038,7.2636822038024595,1.1451005743931812,974,34,202,11,21,324,131,257,0.16399999999999998,0.589,0.247,0.9648,0,0,0,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,1,8,9,22,1,2,11,0,19,4,1,6,1,48,60,15,1,5,10,0,9,9,0,0,1,0,1,1,11,12,0,2,14,3,2,2,7,5,0,0,10,9,31,17,21,49,1,32,0,2,0,2,6,13,1,1,23,119,42,10,0.0,0.0,0.08179648507743664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700065288594097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662543546416097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461780463989116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102192108176421,0.0,0.07132486981687153,0.0,0.0,0.2223966320597096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401155188528842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699219906396068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055362492918276086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533224726137848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3390563462932749,0.41916848643680105,0.08048059686659231,0.09182100057407637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749048211016334,0.3065483935759974,0.0,0.04763698687317116,0.0,0.0,0.09241213542585193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07450330070555916,0.0,0.0,0.04606542423463512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059204730332652285,0.36855311742355457,0.0,0.0,0.07417829472941821,0.0,0.0,0.09149971818752664,0.0,0.07565105955626894,0.07931275915942036,0.05595067615919233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215166263374981,0.0,0.08095413193429565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795526551079717,0.0,0.0,0.12749817358298818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731886202023558,0.0,0.0,0.07923724125832128,0.0,0.16055328301654115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618119019579899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16966116139891224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11865682657482195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601582760693997,0.08762713779763087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0556864579567128,0.0,0.0,0.06654392568864914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117237611233968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447875889264334,0.0,0.0,0.19775745035375414,0.06653262293824057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15126949917376215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084001710553173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05397750095787384
mentalhealth,throwaway279110,2020/02/13,"Medication to help manage mental health In 2017, I was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety. After my third breakdown last year, I was 'unofficially' diagnosed with PTSD from childhood abuse that I went through. 

I have always felt this way (feeling nothing/numb is my baseline), so when I feel emotions such as 'happiness' or 'sadness' I often get really overwhelmed. 

When I had my last breakdown in June 2019, I was switched from Fluoxetine 30mg a day to Sertraline 50mg, which was then increased to 100mg. I thought that Sertraline was working for me, but I was triggered by something last week and I feel like I'm losing control. I have been taking my medication regularly alongside trauma therapy, so I'm just disappointed that I'm in this position again.

Has anyone else found that these medications don't work? Does this mean that I could be drug-resistant? I know this sounds stupid, but I am looking for any kind of answers anywhere I can get them. I just want my life back.",5.186813996316758,7.4431349005524865,5.609922651933701,76.33429465930018,70.16022099447514,8.804567219152856,33.061141804788214,9.3871,3.35088920810313,791,38,135,18,15,253,121,181,0.141,0.805,0.053,-0.9542,0,0,2,0,1,0,22.0,0,0,1,4,10,10,1,1,1,0,17,7,0,2,0,23,34,11,0,2,5,0,4,1,0,0,7,1,0,0,11,4,0,1,9,0,0,2,1,7,0,1,12,6,24,3,17,20,1,20,0,5,1,0,2,3,0,2,15,87,35,3,0.0,0.15581551681795533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942521979552708,0.0,0.0,0.08942997322818078,0.0,0.10060328662538462,0.0,0.0,0.09195347560669792,0.13474552249516533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112156121114103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474974433198947,0.1049984648364295,0.0,0.0,0.08481180302122589,0.0,0.11326767762388355,0.2669557740843433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508356742096085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15250756926456852,0.0,0.10985808828566876,0.1479288385887666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994832412217716,0.09394936629723616,0.12626833656746708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14419177227036625,0.0,0.0,0.13741504071892074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13999274836632394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13978689133929367,0.0,0.0,0.08814706361810452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694538118363955,0.07227337666274873,0.3215898013783756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288801409389943,0.0642481830482106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043362803956393,0.14712385242534862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325080273701862,0.0,0.3974415289710856,0.132529168001477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537258551515916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424741451230906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148566646986181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124131004674504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887767575018126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503908987679564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440268999623584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756684614735165,0.10438495678415377,0.1054878130287868,0.0,0.0,0.1219092657297573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914788310926663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468686271446854
mentalhealth,agrumpyzebra,2020/02/13,"What's wrong with me? Recently I just stopped functioning. I no longer want to eat, read or do anything. The only thing I want to do is lie in my bed, not even sleep just lie down in bed. I not sure why I suddenly become so lethargic to the point I no longer eating",1.4119642857142836,3.0819291249999985,2.8958571428571425,94.24914285714287,79.17857142857143,6.622857142857143,21.91428571428571,7.554174236665415,0.6210328571428576,205,6,48,3,5,67,39,56,0.24600000000000002,0.7090000000000001,0.045,-0.8917,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,3,3,1,0,1,10,5,2,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,7,5,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,3,31,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032034716996852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727162898422612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5053448613303895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630958362890974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780242859137375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23342995315156215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469981859713001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24381493078056615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471096937147011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064456761867481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327298871618109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16405022519189233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912930311452593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228171472444047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699806813281795,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fabelmay,2020/02/13,Getting a job in a medical setting with contamination OCD So I haven’t worked for nearly two years. I’ve had a few health issues myself but since that my anxiety and ocd have gotten out of control. I need to start working and a position has come up at a doctors surgery as a receptionist. It’s a casual role not too far from home and my friend is friends with the owner of the centre and said she’d probably be able to get me the job if I wanted it. I think it could be good for me but I am just really worried about being exposed to sick people... do people who work in medical centres actually get sick more than people who work other jobs?,5.022232824427482,5.193593465648856,6.559608778625956,77.19910782442751,68.54198473282443,9.603435114503815,30.115458015267176,9.516144504307137,2.6009916030534352,508,18,101,10,8,175,93,131,0.115,0.779,0.107,-0.036000000000000004,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,5,4,4,0,0,10,0,12,6,0,1,0,18,22,9,0,4,5,0,0,0,2,0,6,1,1,0,7,8,0,1,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,1,11,4,19,14,2,11,0,0,0,0,8,7,0,1,2,72,18,8,0.14419471130243525,0.0,0.14071323789400605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030855946808217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12421097591474367,0.0,0.0,0.16172662985085134,0.11512774374454825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475893970711226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22280895252362934,0.0,0.22600735571486685,0.0,0.0,0.12094368256874248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327223526580153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14463905235446906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505018156376239,0.42927300407613533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905220031683691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691855134620308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998993710292824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546628706659366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923748243769435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371621907052512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927935525640627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206175882596973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239414867534557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085728063145614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504977668232326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4199018687155837,0.14643672870547464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285666646945442
mentalhealth,haugwa,2020/02/13,feeling guilty i feel extremely guilty when i’m not feeling depressed or anxious. is this normal?,4.984705882352942,8.388226588235298,4.383823529411767,78.77220588235295,77.23529411764707,5.752941176470588,37.911764705882355,7.1686216300943375,3.383258823529413,80,5,11,1,2,24,14,17,0.341,0.40399999999999997,0.256,-0.4401,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,5,2,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,6,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.491690599288555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3748664550266819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6602022487152153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42643696633660094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thejamgroup,2020/02/13,looks promising the quality will be the key,3.765000000000001,6.960115500000002,3.7550000000000026,82.39000000000001,81.5,8.200000000000001,33.0,8.841846274778883,3.67135,36,2,6,1,1,11,7,8,0.0,0.722,0.278,0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ACEs_Survey,2020/02/13,"Request for research survey participation - adverse childhood experiences and adult health - mod approved Hello r/mentalhealth

I am requesting your participation in a short (7-12 min) survey I am conducting related to adverse childhood experiences (ACEs) and adult health and functioning. All adults (18+, English speaking) are welcome to participate, you do not need to have had any childhood adversity. 

I am a bio-behavioral faculty researcher at Thomas Jefferson University in Philadelphia, and the study received IRB (ethics) approval from my institution. All data are completely confidential - no identifying information is collected, including IP address. The study is unfunded, I have been working and publishing in this area for over 10 years. I am happy to answer any questions about the research! Just comment or PM me.

[SURVEY LINK](https://jefferson.co1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_bNSfaJwDQbGf12d)",10.768363636363638,14.323556125925922,9.911919191919193,45.858181818181826,58.11111111111111,12.90909090909091,46.34680134680135,12.079253325248375,7.480185185185188,747,46,82,27,11,237,99,135,0.075,0.83,0.095,0.5594,0,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,2,0,4,2,5,0,0,5,0,13,2,0,0,2,14,14,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,3,1,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,1,9,2,13,12,2,13,0,0,0,0,14,7,0,2,5,52,10,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3490957658140105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691189791654859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5021550375907066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732354373776663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5456672983490648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903213486620815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875348765064832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18686254385571646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529036142201006
mentalhealth,ASmolRandomPasserby,2020/02/13,"Is Crying Bad? From a young age I(F) would always be told/yelled when I cried that I should not cry if no one is dead. That it is pathetic to cry. Rather than comfort usually I got shouting and annoyance. I think it might not be normal and understand that sometimes crying is okay but I just wanted to hear other peoples opinion on the matter. 

It actually gave me a huge amount of stress and sometimes holding in my feelings would cause me to be irrational and so I dont know if crying is good or bad.",2.77715555555556,4.820550760000003,3.9653333333333336,86.42322222222224,76.4,6.844444444444445,25.11111111111111,7.793537801064563,1.4089777777777774,396,14,78,6,9,129,70,100,0.259,0.603,0.13699999999999998,-0.9464,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,1,1,3,1,13,0,0,1,0,26,21,10,1,8,8,0,1,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,7,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,2,3,9,3,8,12,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,5,4,56,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.11859508638671636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112213050279732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20294381334293524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484408936025305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8009655146126567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243145899598805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06144887619643465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193302845445072,0.09719809984143812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697237714048294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678933650236127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12892340435949806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907293136760133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235141304789592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425312914607842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403912117409052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13921142649047868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787108169619111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612647414812127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265163090224532,0.0,0.0,0.13384737744229822,0.0,0.07168114218513562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17266188544686495,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,derpy_and_miserable,2020/02/13,"My friends has ticks and I can't stand some of them [advice] My friend (who I see daily and is a good friend of mine) has recently developed another one of many ticks.

I don't like any of his ticks but I can tolerate them, but this new one in clicking his jaw. I can't stand any type of clicking or cracking of joints.

I tried asking that he does something else or keeps his jaw closed, but he said he can't. 
I want to find a compromise of not cracking/clicking and him doing his ticks

What should I do?",1.4040000000000001,3.332803542857146,2.55261904761905,95.4632142857143,80.23809523809524,6.104761904761905,21.92857142857143,7.1686216300943375,0.4814571428571428,392,12,90,5,10,125,61,105,0.03,0.883,0.086,0.6499,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,11,2,2,0,0,15,16,8,0,2,6,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,4,18,5,9,14,1,6,0,0,3,0,16,2,0,3,3,56,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20883505647877387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906604209034828,0.22409369519542227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19979011403104252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18701916671887212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17852738309163654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19532717855850115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4953357271730506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17924990976539662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899553745911369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440797001822376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21666851917566896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20640256620378192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896310171827082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21101296192805916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032872638317916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17029929698901858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645244917826614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509514359807582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605176617810088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,No_youdonot_knowme,2020/02/13,Is this weird? In my first therapy session I made my therapist laugh with a self-deprecating joke. Up until then he didn't even smile (I get why he probably didn't) and hearing him laugh (more like the huff most of us do when we read something online) made me so much more comfortable and I consider making him laugh as a sort of an achievement. Is that weird (that I see it as an achievement)?,5.028846153846157,5.5958313717948736,5.470923076923079,83.62407692307694,68.61538461538461,9.316923076923075,29.70256410256411,9.3871,2.3678071794871802,309,11,64,6,5,99,57,78,0.064,0.7070000000000001,0.22899999999999998,0.9451,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,2,0,0,3,3,8,0,0,5,0,5,0,0,3,0,9,11,8,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,2,11,6,8,7,4,6,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,2,5,44,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16064188358962464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20687941747713148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12707032907669769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27412212446527545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11882305924888348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4602737468078696,0.16234857811756276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17879175526964824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26222799955424064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432818319611661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19381167407658045,0.0,0.2537273463082196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18723957023176885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781387087847837,0.28239253842106016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29255891874906725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194646230328116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Otherwise-Rabbit,2020/02/13,"Need help with finding resources/help I don't know where to ask for help or even what kind of help I really need. I think at this point I may just need to be committed into a hospital, but I like my freedom and would just rather, well, kill myself. The situation is all kinds of messed up, but I'll do my best to explain myself.

So, yesterday I broke up with my long-term boyfriend who I lived with. The breakup was mutual and I can stay in this house for the time being and he will support me until I leave. This is where the difficulties start: I have nowhere to go. I don't really have any friends, I have no job, no income or savings, no ability to work and despite of this I also don't qualify for disability since ""my condition can improve in 10 years,"" in theory at least...  I don't live in the country I was born in and I don't have citizenship, but as a EU citizen in another EU country I'm supposed to have the same rights as the ones who are citizens, so that I guess should be taken into consideration. 

My question is, what am I supposed to do now? I can't afford to try and get subpar treatment for 10 years for my illnesses and hope that I'd be able to then either be cured/well enough to work or finally be granted disability. I'd rather not go back to my country of origin as I'm afraid that I'd be stuck with my mildly abusive parents and would never get out of that house again. I also don't care about staying in my current country, I have nothing here either. I have actually been dreaming about faking my own death and disappearing to southern France. Or just overcoming my agoraphobia for once and traveling there and ending my life.

I've tried searching online for charities and some sort of help, but I can only find wishful thinking and nice words from WHO and the EU, nothing concrete. If I'd get to build my own treatment plan for myself then I guess I'd need a mix of financial help and help with managing my illnesses, so basically I need parents... Yeah, I need to be treated like a child again. Is there anything like this? Anything remotely close? 

I'm seeing my therapist on next Monday, but that relationship isn't that old and technically I'm not receiving treatment or this is still a introduction period and after a few sessions he would decide if they can do anything for me or not. I also think he will be much help as nobody seems to be aware of what help is really available and what is not. 

Anyway, there are still lots I probably didn't cover, so if you need to ask me something, please do. I really need someone to tell me if my only option is death or if there is something for broken people like me. Thank you.",5.238176089820705,5.6394750264650275,6.2761849114968244,78.61717248095322,68.11153119092629,9.512310248038037,30.96414045941456,9.496760409515344,2.6889528670447382,2095,79,413,41,33,700,233,529,0.11199999999999999,0.732,0.156,0.971,6,0,2,0,0,1,55.0,0,2,1,4,30,21,1,1,14,1,56,3,0,1,3,94,92,49,3,21,28,2,0,4,1,7,3,0,0,3,19,27,0,0,11,2,1,5,17,5,1,1,6,1,56,16,64,69,13,52,0,1,1,0,30,20,0,22,29,296,75,6,0.07109617668988133,0.08423734364466343,0.06937961270254021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705667604376708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048347838140900816,0.074550540249182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17551828688677235,0.0,0.1329306558533126,0.0,0.0,0.05466857136943479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461105115049911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248729044712426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297011008399245,0.07346135572663308,0.0,0.04695835417965482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788238641010298,0.12996123495742298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0549287297489107,0.0,0.111434453801952,0.0,0.08081119124978862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664090815547618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4288884173292791,0.0,0.0,0.07061454533777474,0.0,0.16407088468943912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055198504467765,0.0,0.07865738573242702,0.14807145489615747,0.039072599383109724,0.0,0.0,0.0752805856370658,0.0,0.0,0.050217332159799885,0.13893600289630964,0.0,0.12555845311900785,0.06291787910433763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604434269983991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052263870297998456,0.42173531327330577,0.05483375440350188,0.0,0.07561159047822791,0.0,0.0,0.13643739801685995,0.0,0.07460347777182795,0.0757151078465285,0.04817660930857838,0.1081436921781502,0.0,0.0,0.15788778109771354,0.0,0.0,0.04928913707327729,0.0,0.0,0.07804225222432579,0.06720886728709237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665370327919704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964398901707577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18218412523674896,0.0,0.0,0.07633068676356478,0.0,0.060715746430248976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056654447968809175,0.06472328907281316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058811492045487836,0.07991508141245864,0.0,0.0,0.0602395597935227,0.10946662052159396,0.0,0.0,0.05032223979111119,0.1515581294082018,0.1135549970864292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806790987798659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062141192117792315,0.06545580742345869,0.0,0.08254814087429185,0.0,0.13666667785524927,0.0,0.0,0.04145675236817754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653927419364684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06392400115177438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175709449005288,0.0,0.0,0.10351772676322248,0.0,0.0,0.15151405221459027,0.0,0.0,0.09156721361713653
mentalhealth,coffeeaddict_413,2020/02/13,"I think I may be somewhere on the autistic spectrum I don't know if this is the right place to post this, as I don't think that autism is a mental disorder, but I don't really know anywhere else to go.

To explain. I was never diagnosed, and for most of my life I just thought that I was odd. You know, slower than most children, less probable to accept affection, socially inept, having weird ticks and passions, having a messy way of talking. I didn't think much of it. I mainly thought that I was too much of an idiot to understand some subjects, not that I learn differently (later I found out that I learn with sounds and my brain just shutdowns if I try to do something with symbols that are not letters, probably that's why I learned extremely fast english once I started watching more movies, but I still can't do mental calculation at 17).

Well everything kinda changed when I stumbled randomly upon autistic awareness posts on social media, in many stims were referenced and I was like"" Lol, I do this all the time"" but I still didn't think much of it(I don't think that they are exclusive to autism, right?). Then I started to search for posts, only because I wanted to know what those people go through. So I read a lot of posts about autistic people describing their struggles. And after a lot of amused ""Wow, relatable"" everything just clicked""Wait, isn't everything a little bit too relatable?"". I mean, even my usual meltdowns could be explained this way.

I will start doing group therapy in a short while, should I ask someone there(like a therapist) about this? Or am I just overanalyzing everything?",6.567232033572306,7.39418109302326,6.387092148977097,77.48682461968878,65.31229235880399,9.526210876027278,34.44675642594859,9.549672527348893,3.263600664451828,1283,56,227,24,19,403,170,301,0.062,0.841,0.09699999999999999,0.9025,2,0,1,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,2,0,14,9,1,1,11,1,30,4,1,1,2,54,53,16,0,5,12,0,0,1,0,3,2,1,0,1,16,8,0,0,20,2,0,2,11,3,1,0,10,2,35,6,33,37,13,34,0,0,1,1,12,12,0,11,15,165,51,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882166769853116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05752281551011959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301996793835907,0.0,0.0,0.10534032772332824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982355328950936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534118569936939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577646959000696,0.0,0.0985892620953688,0.10814818555247106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882818708828032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062325878644572064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3392295580162087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346417071779604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725734721639373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074377716189012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665138514164297,0.0461010005948475,0.09457652682837983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604481145804912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566928204483613,0.0,0.10278898217613656,0.0,0.0,0.1901914408470077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20810301135511286,0.0,0.0727785711889285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049352677798874,0.0,0.07176732183888572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13083886049207952,0.0,0.0985892620953688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36149471982946857,0.0,0.20347857124456775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438854672530822,0.0,0.0604513609922934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16117099118715847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923824121000373,0.07995347279271141,0.07264525583837697,0.0,0.0,0.20037187408727697,0.0,0.1507168445643668,0.0,0.0,0.09864870724676893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584541363711794,0.0,0.0,0.10791232661565994,0.10956272851434867,0.0,0.3023200354004153,0.0,0.14982738017691535,0.05502383041815759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406629015157414,0.0,0.0,0.09823522208570724,0.0,0.0,0.10392752484029663,0.0,0.05565774860428675,0.14980193140056222,0.0,0.0,0.0848436792102721,0.0,0.08514793997848273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cynicast9,2020/02/13,"My mental health I dont really feel happy or sad, just sort of empty. I can pretend to be happy throughout the day but as soon as I get home, nothing. Absolutely nothing. 
I also dont outright love anything or hate anything, most of its just neutral. I just do those things to pass time and get through the day and onto the next. 
I haven't really spoken to anyone about this mainly because it doesn't seem like depression and honestly others have it worse, so I just tend to live with I suppose. I've tried to reaching out to friend but I immediately get dismissive because I feel needy and stupid.
Am I depressed? Because I dont really know myself",2.961272965879268,5.247037771653545,4.425688976377955,82.18268044619424,76.79527559055117,6.753018372703411,26.33136482939633,7.793537801064563,1.735635695538058,515,20,94,8,12,171,79,127,0.259,0.6409999999999999,0.1,-0.9685,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,8,11,2,0,3,0,10,2,0,0,0,20,20,12,0,0,8,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,7,6,0,0,4,1,0,1,5,5,0,0,0,2,14,6,15,19,2,8,0,3,0,1,2,2,0,5,6,66,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235307067530197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823673233354514,0.0,0.2312293255825027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25693167438708353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18121412675595794,0.0,0.24201470266055344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4939740711219896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14207606360089753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854538316401527,0.0,0.2202070854523176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991171363379802,0.0,0.138708824406542,0.0,0.14933864476174613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092702452457245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721187601899385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863831431472224,0.0,0.12405885285881775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680139884118066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158499521034093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941705547564782,0.0,0.0,0.2696157313911854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700123292121464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790054028480696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333802866527924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192323199734593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538626285029954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14317547747576484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,musicforone,2020/02/13,"When people ask me how my day/week is going, I don't know what to say. I'm sure they're tired of hearing me be honest and say I'm feeling low or struggling, and it feels so disingenuous to say ""fine thanks"". How do you answer? It's almost always by text as I live alone and don't see anyone during the week except for work colleagues",4.8255633802816895,4.229785323943664,5.791654929577469,85.15396126760565,69.0,7.663380281690142,24.79225352112676,5.985473137389443,0.6535042253521128,262,5,57,1,4,87,55,71,0.135,0.743,0.122,-0.2263,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,4,6,0,1,1,0,5,1,0,2,1,13,15,9,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,7,6,4,7,14,0,4,0,1,1,0,6,1,0,2,2,30,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21202480165555002,0.21929648376641256,0.0,0.0,0.17618279528926542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805197923498753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19794624221571064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655335175678515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21412196760178773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033546012533387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23864386719342515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116365546710627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18696833934793025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14679231668692888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5051471446236234,0.0,0.0,0.16872759723094094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22135430132090544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19956035225467364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949397003647746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433614307344707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3396865512921317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15414762594795367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aruinedguy,2020/02/13,"Where to find group therapy for men in the NYC area? I hope this is the right place to ask. 

I’m looking for a therapy group to join for men specifically. I’m currently in a mix member group but that’s not working for me. I want a group that I can talk about men’s issues with other men only. I’m not gay. So those groups won’t work for me either. Please help.",-0.6223076923076931,1.5131124102564115,1.6725128205128217,96.96415384615385,91.56410256410255,5.171282051282052,15.492307692307696,6.742157984588678,-0.3896861538461538,280,6,67,4,10,94,50,78,0.0,0.841,0.159,0.8591,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,8,10,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,12,9,1,7,0,0,1,1,12,6,0,1,1,36,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274816974735449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224001840967075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163099682937893,0.0,0.0,0.24168265080231754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539744113233446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20433680918708072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18506423901864086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542291714054581,0.26710443722234545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20780339903787784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955802919512317,0.0,0.0,0.5565405561793553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352296598257833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35429582516595465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sparkrist,2020/02/13,"I can't explain this emotion It might be on the tip of my nose, but what is this sensation that I feel, whenever I look off into the distance and just being mesmerized? Like, being suckered into the visual of a mountain from afar or a city from afar? Stuff like that, background things, even.

Everytime this happens, my mind immediately ceases thoughts and sometimes it's depression, sometimes it's nostalgic feeling and sometimes it's something else. I can't explain it.",5.697899159663862,8.048989176470593,5.804537815126048,75.07470588235296,69.0,8.151260504201678,36.84873949579832,8.841846274778883,3.6834033613445385,380,21,59,7,7,120,56,85,0.109,0.7959999999999999,0.095,-0.4871,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,5,0,7,1,1,0,0,15,14,5,0,0,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,13,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,4,6,2,8,9,0,4,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,2,2,46,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19009459740643267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18437236025841391,0.24826564476504534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577487793814378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22319215993405367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951704524271741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156525629703405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853382756908058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234135226436552,0.2228511320668544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16991101502179778,0.6548545363885365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526566870055405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14662790968301212,0.0,0.0,0.17521668793179404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExtremeSwim,2020/02/13,"Rumination is killing me, can somebody please help? Just some encouragement or a similar story would be nice. I’ve had a problem with rumination for nearly a year now. I’ve been speaking with a therapist a few weeks but I feel so hopeless. A person I used to work with insulted my hobby of learning languages calling it stupid bullshit because We SpEaK EnGLisH. They also made mean comments about other races too. I finally decided to get in touch with them and tell them how I feel and I told them they’re a racist, but I forgot to mention my language part. I feel the same because I forgot to mention that and I can’t go back and say anything more. I feel so stupid and like I’ll never be free of this all because I forgot three sentences. Does anyone have any advice/recovery stories? I just want to know it’s possible. Thank you.",2.668965141612201,5.230783376543215,3.8598039215686266,84.36264705882354,79.43209876543209,6.280900508351492,28.04793028322441,7.510576382923642,1.8722065359477127,665,30,121,10,17,216,110,162,0.21899999999999997,0.684,0.09699999999999999,-0.9821,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,1,1,4,1,10,11,4,0,8,0,9,0,0,3,2,36,25,12,1,3,5,0,5,1,0,1,0,3,0,1,5,10,0,3,8,0,1,1,2,6,0,1,7,8,21,6,15,15,6,9,0,1,0,0,19,2,0,2,7,83,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417947327711736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057687157208115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12397926577195352,0.0,0.1459110117452139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363404355295269,0.0,0.3242595675507005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810533214626248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15516516474368647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3586130285604744,0.0,0.0,0.19423442422658885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09263715015636637,0.0,0.10076935188410784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884714694275512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961672302702424,0.0,0.0974449319548586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866247035138606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16777499714484118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931425563568895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675239300788505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920094374971152,0.0,0.0,0.15482024173189599,0.0,0.1946331208486412,0.0,0.19989036934826485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16966171159453922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100401859050934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549767441407972,0.16324321394359248,0.0,0.20587056140351548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16942729130302495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531388995679364,0.0,0.0,0.10458202444382926,0.0,0.14222737662615845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908378249495708,0.0,0.0,0.1259559276949286,0.0,0.0,0.11418181847500775
mentalhealth,dnzprs,2020/02/13,"How can I overcome my trust issues? TL;DR at the end.

I've been very trusting my entire life. I've even trusted strangers up to a point. But now I see clearly, everything I tell my mother finds its way to everybody else in the family, and everything I tell my cousin goes to my mother. They're not even that smart about it, either, because I can understand it all from between the lines. 

Now, I had learned not to tell my mother or cousin anything, but I had trusted my husband. I had told him about my mental health and other things, which I didn't want heard. What did he do? He went straight to his family and told them EVERYTHING. 

For a time now, his family has been acting as if I'm a mental case, even going as far as to tell me not to have kids yet, because ""I can't handle it"". 

My husband told me he learned from his mistakes and he won't tell anybody anything anymore. I want to believe him but I can't. I don't trust anybody anymore, but I want to start healing. Where can I start? 

TL;DR: Some of my family members and my husband have been telling my secrets to other family members. Now I have trust isssues. How can I overcome it?",2.545652173913041,4.37885595652174,3.773260869565217,88.4929347826087,76.39130434782608,6.339130434782609,26.71739130434783,7.1686216300943375,1.3036695652173913,890,35,180,10,20,290,108,230,0.04,0.85,0.11,0.9554,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,1,0,13,8,0,0,6,0,21,3,0,2,2,29,35,16,0,5,10,8,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,11,5,0,0,5,0,0,3,8,1,0,0,13,2,37,7,23,21,3,20,0,0,1,0,30,7,0,3,9,126,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19969674730769066,0.0,0.0,0.16570356214114595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122748253104941,0.0,0.0,0.11343286819495126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410595147949286,0.0,0.0891733710579306,0.0,0.0,0.1994963040058224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714564339304991,0.0,0.47456484011322403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202049522024916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057219261117209624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701906144479566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508467516862734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111387908091882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20292528201592352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517596924923646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022962170569753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252488221390788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5279971315258065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688789924940004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05870782752091785,0.0,0.0,0.2886146702401753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481234095952036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307226554000469,0.1781525648304266,0.07991579179538925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933321792538887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ariicecream,2020/02/13,What's this feeling.... So I've been feeling kinda empty and maybe sad idk for past couple of days there's not even a reason I feel like I'm missing someone or something idk what that is but I feel like I'm meant to be somewhere else. I'm not unmotivated coz I have goals but this feeling it's really weird I experience it many times it's like I feel lonely even if I'm surrounded with ppl who love..,0.05457754010695126,2.367814094117648,2.416577540106953,91.50005347593584,90.41176470588236,4.973262032085562,19.491978609625672,6.574015621080383,0.1990000000000008,318,10,69,4,11,108,56,85,0.155,0.6759999999999999,0.17,0.5087,0,2,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,2,0,18,17,6,0,1,6,0,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,8,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,6,5,4,4,14,0,4,0,3,0,1,2,1,0,3,6,34,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199172993517432,0.0,0.12817975851387178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16603329637654826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26255002082780393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194419354272444,0.0,0.0,0.6029753590068536,0.28397950887796025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913032017258356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17938306437413884,0.0,0.0,0.20150515756620052,0.19967490643499872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18973299156938264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273267736673775,0.20435200880741453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684034497667672,0.15301038547868173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589493912069355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Glasgow100,2020/02/13,"I got into a great course but my brain stops me from going I don't know how to begin, basically I got into a 5 week intensive welding course with a chance for employment at the end. 

The thing is, I'm more than capable of doing this, I already know how to weld, I pick up practical skills quite easily. 

Every morning this week I've woke up on time to go but I just don't, I lay in bed knowing I'm supposed to be there.

I don't get it, I really don't understand why, especially since I've always had shitty jobs in retail and this is the perfect opportunity to get out of that. This new job would be full time, Monday-friday, no late nights and with the chance to pursue further specialised qualifications. 

I've had to deal with anxiety before, sure, but this is really winding me up. I hate this, I hate feeling like this. I try, I try to be mindful of my body and mind. I meditate, I do exercise, I'm even on sertraline (Zoloft?). I don't get this! I'm a huge mix bag of anger and confusion and frustration and it's so so fucking shitty.",2.6476690489279804,4.04936351401869,4.868944474986262,82.5756981858164,75.07476635514018,8.39978009895547,25.205057724024183,9.007467420416297,1.8960613523914245,808,27,170,18,17,282,119,214,0.168,0.6829999999999999,0.149,-0.8118,3,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,4,7,11,5,1,8,0,16,5,2,3,2,31,37,13,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,12,12,0,1,5,1,1,2,6,6,0,0,5,1,20,5,29,28,2,26,0,0,0,1,1,14,1,1,11,104,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569094354203719,0.0,0.1183128935079977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877443023925494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12099262704528475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15794026517300416,0.0,0.1587302908167957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659093143070812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12593752148593607,0.0,0.0,0.09391469588597433,0.0,0.11980062325229462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189518564795068,0.1015800689332783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314517225981184,0.2228641319069949,0.0,0.16161891921023444,0.0,0.22744355520479625,0.15676421232518814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807650051378346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822018929485153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23443057274752835,0.0,0.16039573099737525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06946651286850786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871413317839919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373273181998026,0.0,0.13343503192849454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151235829829268,0.0,0.0,0.18218022134466666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762046363297368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887662700159833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13401173858072096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446425708632317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582345608545168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19307441104648349,0.0,0.0,0.14802408258184754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22811136980282465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830373293249714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10100720368623926,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hitendra55,2020/02/13,"Getting suicidal thoughts since yesterday anyone here to talk? Haven't talked to anyone since past 3 days.
Feels like killing myself.
Anybody got spare 2 mins to talk?",4.283275862068965,7.69266551724138,2.699568965517244,88.62107758620691,83.48275862068967,5.658620689655173,27.9396551724138,7.1686216300943375,1.8744413793103445,136,6,22,2,4,38,24,29,0.266,0.662,0.07200000000000001,-0.8299,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,1,1,3,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3411620483499088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733265247487174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335243581545367,0.17428356044002696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745792493551572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19511540510110592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26990325229552936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918549889967844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23288540383989656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4036089638022613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668503281574269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5882523164542356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19367530883064246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zudizzle,2020/02/13,"I recently spoke to someone who thought their life was done and overcome their struggles. It impacted me in a way I never thought it would Recently, I interviewed an athlete for my sports business who had played 2 sports at the elite level representing his country and his state teams all before the age of 24. At just 24, he was forced to retire due to injuries that could've severely impacted his daily life.

One can only imagine how difficult it could have been, but the guy overcame severe mental health issues due to his career-ending and life-threatening injuries and is now working with sports professionals and athletes on mental healthcare here in Australia.

You often think with sports it's always solely about the glitz, glamour and luxury, but there are so many stories like his, which make you realise that we only see a small percentage of the athletes at the top, who are often just like us and go through everyday issues and struggles with their mental and physical health.

It's these kinds of stories that make my day and make this new venture I've worth it! Not only has it made me smarter and wiser, but the discussion taught me a thing or two about dealing with my own mental health struggles, and I really felt it would be worth sharing with all of you",13.861244680851064,8.913189991489359,11.683271276595745,63.61937500000002,55.46808510638298,14.473404255319151,47.247340425531924,11.20814326018867,5.264712765957446,1028,42,173,16,8,315,137,235,0.069,0.807,0.124,0.9421,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,2,3,3,4,11,10,0,3,11,0,15,5,0,5,3,43,27,18,0,3,7,0,1,2,0,2,5,1,0,1,18,18,0,0,5,6,2,1,2,4,0,2,11,3,23,6,23,12,3,22,0,0,1,0,24,9,0,3,12,122,41,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795853590145175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995075696508295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688004146789919,0.0,0.0,0.06817369921530911,0.10898156002079004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817722942476536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362698921915692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149742477958572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06007698352312836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466874342011764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370918602693688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206659147767336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11007988149247046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239966363629854,0.10328836671854827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002461612192963,0.2116851675782696,0.10717255330735352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4261201066236814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152946414631812,0.10209461952945054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163130053819683,0.24118986662508785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772003060932695,0.0,0.2087501958920208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423655893435389,0.0,0.0,0.23884265029781496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956707567815825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315306734867416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022850597234068,0.06773419726228805,0.0,0.16784261934134898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326254388300238,0.0,0.1271551712165649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0839070553024906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695756823931348,0.0,0.0,0.1501855882028742,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,max_harlan,2020/02/13,"Letter to a Young Manic Depressive I just wrote this letter to a friend with bipolar - Thoughts? 

[https://medium.com/@maxharlan/letter-to-a-young-manic-depressive-fcd33a212ca9](https://medium.com/@maxharlan/letter-to-a-young-manic-depressive-fcd33a212ca9)",42.53833333333333,55.379387277777795,20.838888888888885,-43.65499999999997,9.555555555555543,6.844444444444445,28.222222222222207,7.793537801064563,2.9804222222222223,233,4,12,2,3,52,15,18,0.138,0.691,0.17,0.1531,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,8,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6138054927077726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.550592601703135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5657655027231169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saturnisburning,2020/02/13,"8/10 people have pica so why isn't it addressed more often Let me (19F) start off with saying the courage i needed to build up to speak about this took far longer than i had hoped for it to. 

Pica is an eating disorder that involves eating items that are not typically thought of as food and that do not contain significant nutritional value, such as-but are not limited to-hair, dirt, and paint chips. Many women develop pica throughout a term in their pregnancy, some deal with it their entire lives. I have never met another individual in person-at least nobody willing to open up about it-that suffers with dealing with this disorder. 

My addiction started when i was two years old and my mother would find me sucking on dryer sheets that had fallen out of baskets of freshly done laundry as she carried them throughout the house. She monitered me closely soon after and made sure to keep them out of reach, but never looked further into as to why i was doing so; after all, i was 2, and toddlers will eat just about anything they can get their hands on. My cravings subsided until around age 12 my family was struggling for money so my mother began substituting every day items for things she could prepare for a more affordable price on her own. One of which was laundry detergent. She began mixing pink zote soap, oxi clean, and washing powder into a large bucket to create homemade laundry detergent. I cant even remember what possessed me to do so but one day i licked my finger, dipped it inside the bucket and spread the powder on my tongue. I continued to do so until my tongue burned. I did this every day in the morning, after school, and as many times as i could throughout the day before going to bed. Soon after i would place scoops full of the powdered detergent into ziploc bags and keep them in my school bag. 

At 17 my mother decided to stop making the homemade detergent because we were no longer struggling to that extent and it was just one of those things that consumed too much time and there was always the convenient option of liquid detergent. For a short period of time, i stopped. No supply, no problem, right? But then i would go to my friends house montha later and one day when helping load the dishwasher i realized the packets placed inside the designated slot were granual powders. I slid one into my pocket slyly and cut it open moments later in the bathroom. It was the most delicious thing i had ever tasted. I would eat a packet every 1-3 days and would have ate more if it werent for the consistent burns in my mouth and throat. I am no longer friends with this person and have recently started purchasing my own.

 I cannot even begin to express the amount of times i have tried to stop, taken iron supplements, substituted ice chips, and even tried overeating to avoid the addiction.  If anybody else deals with this and has somehow overcome it, im begging you to please share how.",8.78816710677771,7.816811764168192,8.274548039813121,71.82212607488661,61.15722120658136,10.736244837158914,35.98137991739454,9.725611199111238,3.44573023224321,2333,86,398,36,27,740,285,547,0.079,0.851,0.07,-0.5655,2,1,0,0,0,0,51.0,1,1,7,1,25,13,2,3,23,0,43,14,4,3,5,81,65,39,0,12,10,3,2,0,2,7,3,2,3,2,26,35,7,8,5,0,3,5,12,7,0,6,23,8,53,6,76,32,16,80,0,1,2,0,31,32,1,8,43,294,79,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636495248325893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624546225017327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870530319896056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617666884783223,0.06681791166362333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045754919283708735,0.0,0.06386919145963907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198560897912624,0.0,0.0,0.29043884862812,0.23214582147118346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720469158802683,0.0,0.0,0.07681082862243893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072140290008982,0.06270168289782065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872614568911036,0.06789464269351952,0.1897198812111358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075840317076633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686020407581658,0.0,0.09076094558656213,0.0,0.11597990610857355,0.0,0.03921492920095205,0.0,0.0853148654312212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05031008019167778,0.0,0.0,0.07454995205252438,0.0,0.17321469009402235,0.0,0.0,0.08107597921589113,0.0,0.0,0.13343075393914933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675232504518173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627796451168183,0.0,0.06303017315017223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102209668172449,0.050102081603272966,0.15219492436429044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517657879347496,0.055654871161796085,0.11577936930946135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876119097330161,0.0,0.2543076569301677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052036061238469454,0.13107624334605775,0.15684015774994275,0.0823916111555303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182077597445354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741111396863515,0.0,0.08502656389111178,0.06409948493695035,0.0,0.059689472276976636,0.0,0.15192626679128726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593802188624781,0.0,0.0,0.18825661287276949,0.0,0.1569347257254495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074167739202528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959644738552855,0.0,0.0,0.059588005434802575,0.17506868515644006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833926720616991,0.10191948737892524,0.0,0.07332117492277491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13545710815230064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26659675835555763,0.0,0.0,0.04833516488768701
mentalhealth,TakeYourVitaminsKids,2020/02/13,"What to do if you believe your parent suffers from bipolar disorder? What to do if you think your parent suffers from bipolar disorder?

I (F25) come here seeking advice in the most loving and serious way possible. I have a meeting and dad and one brother (22M). For over 10 years my mom's behavior has always concerned me. It has been getting dramatically worse the past 3 years, especially the past year. It has really been effecting our relationship to the point I am considering going on a long long break from her. I really do think she suffers from bipolar disorder. I'm wondering how others have handled this? Did you talk to the person? Do I talk to my dad? They are still married btw. My mom and I have the same general physician. Do I make an appointment and talk to her about it? My dad does not have the same issues that I have with her. He actually does not discuss their relationship problems with me. He over heard a big argument in October and came to apologise on her behalf afterwards. He was clear that she should not have said what she said to me. Usually though he either ends up being neutral or sides with her. Very rarely sides with me. I am the only one who seems to suffer from this side of her. I asked my brother once in the past year if he has noticed her becoming worse. He says he does not. He doesn't see anything cause he calls them about 5 times a year and visits really only during the holidays.",3.586630434782609,5.678388242753629,4.842101449275366,80.82989130434784,74.18115942028986,8.368115942028984,27.44202898550725,9.075114841892004,2.42656811594203,1129,44,212,26,24,373,145,276,0.121,0.8370000000000001,0.042,-0.9676,2,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,5,3,1,6,7,0,0,15,0,25,5,0,4,1,37,41,13,0,5,9,9,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,12,13,0,0,5,1,0,4,5,6,0,2,8,5,38,1,30,31,4,34,0,4,1,1,54,13,0,7,15,145,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.09431803857134913,0.0,0.0,0.0944468440748104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042189011169802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953604768372922,0.0,0.0903562173216659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674412032231734,0.0,0.10889327781584916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869210991624304,0.11054370454358343,0.0,0.09928783724891496,0.0,0.08325681217098016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323133887150376,0.0,0.2537414509219663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560464725002198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504964820954524,0.0,0.05492934275932596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100879179989164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17106728380376568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723186022524881,0.0,0.06451570659888241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22639441749354802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003850952362836,0.0,0.10293082051236742,0.13098727761669804,0.1470158239977235,0.0,0.0,0.21464037124804586,0.0,0.2767947218168625,0.0,0.08439246621287633,0.0,0.0,0.09136702109160906,0.10896017893264544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248254687624026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18575250727658701,0.0,0.0,0.20753533719509729,0.0,0.0,0.18387564648627416,0.07686124722235066,0.0,0.0,0.07701882729831079,0.08798800450799665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718610826704085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330547322221672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386091044386968,0.09495972553545272,0.0,0.056358336643777124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064481041576325,0.07974770835109984,0.0,0.0767175568803629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481455858024284,0.0,0.0,0.19699251511400576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112023708910037
mentalhealth,itsallgone2myhead,2020/02/13,"I'm thankful my roommate got the flu My roommate works for an arts and crafts store. Homie never gets the flu shot and usually ends up ill. When he's sick I've got a one in three chance of catching it. Normally.

I have two dogs, or spreaders of disease in this case. That's bad enough, but the oblivious guy he is decided it was a good idea to take baths in my tub while he had the flu. Every. Day.

He has no tub in his bathroom. He said he poured bleach in the water. I was and am pissed because I wound up with Influenza B.

I went straight to the doc. They verified and gave me some new Flu medication I'm nicknaming Flu-B-Gone. I felt 90% better the next day, and I couldn't be sadder.

I work a lot. I've struggled with insomnia, manic depressive fits, and generalized anxiety disorder. I love getting sick because everyone leaves me alone, I have to sterilize my place, and I have to relax. I'm two days out of work, and heavily debating a third just to give my dogs a haircut. Also to enjoy the fact my roommate is gone because I'm still a little pissed. I've gotten so much cleaning and organizing done. I didn't have a date or a dinner or work to get to. No gym because flu. I try not to get people sick if I can help it. 

I love my girl, my family, and I really can't miss work considering the current state of it. I'm needed, but I couldn't care less. 

I hate wanting to get sick, and I hate milking being sick, but today was actually a good day. I don't know what to do, but my house is 90% presentable. It's kinda nice, and maybe worth the loss in sick time alone",1.1851829268292668,3.1469568475609755,3.301402439024393,89.64954268292685,81.13414634146342,6.782926829268294,22.75,7.865858978985527,1.0761170731707312,1218,41,269,22,32,414,176,328,0.217,0.627,0.156,-0.9694,1,2,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,1,7,5,19,4,1,20,0,23,22,2,0,2,40,53,24,0,6,10,0,1,0,0,0,15,1,2,2,8,15,3,0,4,4,2,3,9,9,0,5,14,2,32,10,27,35,5,34,0,3,0,2,16,13,2,7,17,150,40,5,0.0,0.0,0.10182562053350364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161398015223661,0.0,0.08344461985982128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07982360214363894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712367584815284,0.2544308552828368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922846299267529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10638663208191264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26917544539713995,0.0,0.08987215366084733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958835421816845,0.0,0.0,0.10678111297832038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241865563384448,0.10781622786174744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791512183531569,0.09970607257658508,0.0,0.0,0.09836713362750897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018751672629116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27257965188910993,0.10009718530674763,0.0,0.17503918908391314,0.1669083793026429,0.0,0.0,0.10331790688183128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20603807362340235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994022136257128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040006418464322,0.0,0.11779274911222748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057345256381007015,0.0,0.0,0.11048623721041798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458105360990007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871034618874678,0.1883507849033244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482852850057522,0.0,0.0,0.1051165607941562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670554529315489,0.07737045924258527,0.08047725910862409,0.10077700418492244,0.11097203948053776,0.0,0.10223589774801464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070683947283768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723396509802601,0.0,0.10901826542294143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684604771116821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925594344447893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333001290004677,0.0,0.0,0.1090839988218503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784544174919497,0.0,0.0,0.09606681197531626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084438022581981,0.0,0.0989068131022329,0.0,0.0,0.07084337255360773,0.0,0.2038597110211313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492122211878306,0.0,0.06154535576415995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672881524707444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3798218364620849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NWcoffeeaddict,2020/02/13,"What is it when you have to make hyper noises like ZIIIOOOOOPATINTSTAPTINGTINTINGNNNNNN? If you think that's funny, try dealing with it. So, my question is the title, but allow me to elaborate. I have issues with talking to myself, making weird noises when intrusive thoughts or memories pop up, and then I have this intense *need* to make this stretched out hyper energied noises. Sometimes it's just noises, other times it's a sentence I say fast until it becomes noises, other times it can be a miz with bizarre laughter. 

I am aware of it, and I do my best to hide it in public or around people but when I get somewhere safe I have to release that all out or else I will get extremely grumpy or angry. This has been getting worse the past 5 years, and I am becoming increasingly aware of how difficult it is to hide and how much I am actually failing at doing so. It is embarassing. Sometimes I will just slip into my head and it becomes like I am trapped in my own thoughts or just some weird daydream and I will lose the reality around me. My body is just on autopilot, but my head is elsewhere. It's when I hear my own voice saying something, anything, but it's out loud and it triggers me out of my stupor and it feels like I am being sucked out of a dream in awakeness. 

I already have a PTSD, GAD and depression diagnoses that is about a decade old. Have had a lot of treatment for that but this is something else.",5.359498596068995,6.114364350180504,5.7900060168471725,80.96040413156842,67.95306859205776,8.321620537505014,30.912354592860012,8.344100000000001,2.2211630164460487,1123,43,215,15,18,361,139,277,0.149,0.745,0.106,-0.9436,0,1,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,0,3,15,12,1,0,9,0,30,4,3,7,1,52,43,30,0,2,15,0,1,3,0,3,1,5,0,0,26,20,0,1,5,1,0,1,0,7,0,0,4,6,30,5,32,34,8,28,0,3,0,0,9,15,1,9,15,167,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.1212699261580958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371354109672735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226390174787392,0.2212538998513748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4117404831157258,0.0,0.0,0.13041405552942292,0.0,0.0,0.13803633360067533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281172644077692,0.10703386221480446,0.12613177978130066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076238470041819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283481808462409,0.08877875611450005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19477837159410485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255074442783019,0.0,0.14006170548551286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12970594907909122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18213663375623992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902672394587473,0.0,0.10565019958045596,0.0,0.0,0.24885425186292434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135299902794804,0.09214488288906708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040081787881572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863010153068128,0.08615340703759435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452653779464354,0.0,0.1392112220119578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19764952529250385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913387588994706,0.24581308876334726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09988379245184416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962741640370256,0.0,0.19731353851923208,0.14492606985277334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437140390948789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664209372580115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002602494670716
mentalhealth,slambarz,2020/02/13,"Do I have a brain tumor or something? In the span of two hours I started a new project, did the dishes, cleaned my living room, painted my basement, trimmed my beard, made tea and then sat down to write this. 

It's like my brain can get sucked into a pointless project for 6 hours straight or do completely unrelated random shit for 6 hours straight and never finish any of it. 

Help.

Actually now that I think about it I'm the same way at work. Put me on a monotonous job for 8 hours and I become super depressed and lethargic. Set the place on fire and cause an absolute clusterfuck for 12 hours a day and I'm in my element.",3.3208800000000025,4.9282683280000015,4.200199999999999,87.21310000000004,73.72,7.240000000000001,28.5,7.908726449838941,1.7054799999999992,491,20,102,7,10,158,85,125,0.134,0.7659999999999999,0.1,-0.6666,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,2,5,2,0,10,0,5,5,3,2,1,16,13,9,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,7,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,3,1,10,2,15,10,1,27,0,1,0,0,2,12,2,3,13,58,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.14219194431810542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908779886544453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609252508116379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3253211057894056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14968431107569086,0.0,0.0,0.15277416623053866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397089785256424,0.0,0.12549981234719526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761274627752691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766634378928753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7174750111180931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14459469487118234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118654752482093,0.0,0.1286646024611762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787432826037796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238053729593588,0.1407276291814306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522359406744285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647879870797653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14956922449734578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217467930119887,0.0,0.0,0.10313429031404853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336508661437827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14233750075053125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565781839177627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060786178135732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Joey8732,2020/02/13,"I know I have something wrong with me, but I don't know what it is. It all started a little over 2 years ago. It was a day just like any other (a side from the fact that I did get into an argument with my mom, but that truly is beside the point.) 

It seemed that literally out of nowhere, I started thinking rapidly about things that had happened in my life recently. It seemed like I couldn't turn my mind off no matter what. I went to school the next day and the problem still persisted. Eventually, it developed and I began thinking very very deeply about anything and everything that would pop into my head. 

I would start thinking about random situations that could happen to me, and what I would do or what others would do in those situations. It didn't even have to be something that worried me, or even be considered worrying to others. I always felt the uncontrollable impulse to think, think, think. 

Ever since then it has been a rocky road. I went to therapy for a few months, it made me feel less insecure about my problem, but I dont anybody ever truly understood what was going on with me. This has brought me to some real low points in my life, and even to the point of believing I might lose my mind. 

So here's my problem in the best way I can describe it:

 I just think!, over and over about every single situation or concept or thing that you could possibly imagine, even If it has nothing to do with me, or doesn't effect me in anyway. It's like worrying about things that you truly aren't worried about, if that makes any sense. 

Example: I could spend up to 20 minutes of my day pondering everything that could've happened if I waited longer to leave the house, or perhaps if it had rained that day, or if I had more schoolwork the day before. 

These aren't even things that I worry about, but it's the kind of stuff that I think about constantly!, and god help of I ever ponder deep existential questions, that could consume a lot of my time. 

I just want to focus on the places and people around me, and not so much on made up scenarios In my head. If anybody has any idea what's wrong with me please let me know!",6.0913321456848815,5.920183068883612,6.274527909738718,81.32094467537611,66.29216152019002,9.391963578780679,30.605799683293746,8.959647251330699,2.2761139350752178,1676,55,338,25,24,536,190,421,0.121,0.792,0.08800000000000001,-0.9272,0,0,2,0,0,0,46.0,0,2,0,4,26,14,0,2,18,0,38,4,2,4,5,91,72,29,0,19,21,1,2,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,46,18,0,1,22,0,1,4,9,9,0,0,16,2,47,5,53,43,9,54,0,2,0,0,5,28,0,20,24,256,93,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057734667997179474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054194177880493966,0.0,0.0,0.13287386269908005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05359723217269286,0.057980364707209166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05542165150307292,0.07338029061174442,0.06835092631245374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038343167698033,0.0,0.2600088668387966,0.0,0.0,0.2100204115598958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633300234307594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21509193053810904,0.17674405172314164,0.054875644523815284,0.0,0.11707101787589533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032932171331713674,0.0,0.06253593737712655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034028239441018335,0.0,0.03701542662355963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17278528367982632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336863145009618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04365591089777315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515238544760758,0.0,0.0735249282810977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06782387425537144,0.1073828201086707,0.0,0.0,0.06896428454356425,0.0,0.06660082135833374,0.0920078491626916,0.09545909436013547,0.06527833439818538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286488657461032,0.0,0.055372014750285636,0.0,0.12325698200828075,0.04347542285625807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06909365807541219,0.13152740965203147,0.0762805954681951,0.05198691244815884,0.0,0.04787875110265398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926751693552856,0.0,0.0,0.06249491458914349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045153608267821214,0.0,0.06804799282606598,0.07149423776757953,0.18470943370911624,0.0734253734992397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18696460339184612,0.0,0.0,0.07296158331230809,0.0,0.0,0.07413329368885964,0.0,0.0,0.06430896747437452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591601067621518,0.0,0.118585563234915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053877004775313465,0.21962979035875013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002819930502313,0.0,0.0,0.13830009030037071,0.0,0.05201367035165741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455936899421622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448293121702411,0.0,0.1730804682429256,0.33386632439063313,0.0,0.0,0.03797838768623205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084378378227249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747972936071566,0.03841592884705646,0.051697926004434167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075410850596136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307182669954281,0.0,0.1850686667015985,0.14242096493975062,0.0,0.041942204097601306
mentalhealth,throwaway20200213,2020/02/13,"I need help I'm a 14 year old girl and really confused. So recently I've been really unmotivated and I've just been doing things if I need to do. I was having depression symptoms however it was definitely not depression. Right now I am sitting in bed and it feels like my brain is going really slow but there is this TV in my head that is playing really fast, like 3x speed. When I look away from the phone I feel semi normal, as if I am me again but when I look back on the phone I get the same feeling. Maybe I'm on it for too long. I've also been distant with my friends and just not speaking to them how I usually speak to them, instead I'm just in my head thinking so many things to the point where I can't remember what I'm even thinking. I don't know if it has anything to do with the fact that I am in a place where I have a lot of pressure on me and I now feel like I have to grow up but don't want to...Idk, a lot is going on in my life that I just need to know what's wrong. Also if your into dreams and the meaning behind them I recently dreamt that I was at my old primary school (grades 1-6) and a tornado hit but it was in the distance, so all I saw was was the tornado. Eventually it subsided.

All of the above is really not like me cause I'm usually the person that smiles and can take anything and laugh about it. Sorry If I gave too much useless information but I just want to give you an understanding of what's happening in my life so that i can know if this is normal or not. Please don't feel the need or pressure to be my psychologist/psychiatrist.",2.7536819980217606,3.517778516320476,4.767555637982195,85.89131367457966,73.92581602373888,8.58402571711177,25.31763105835806,8.959647251330699,1.6343987141444107,1228,38,282,25,24,425,152,337,0.085,0.807,0.10800000000000001,0.8897,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,3,0,26,14,0,3,17,0,32,6,3,2,3,65,66,32,0,14,22,0,5,4,1,0,3,2,1,2,20,12,0,0,14,3,0,3,8,7,0,0,11,10,39,7,34,53,6,41,0,3,3,0,16,20,0,11,21,199,59,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15865108445749815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16325670069160028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931961883605556,0.07627419414469419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073349964501142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018997372896768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17087158722487925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551681402482815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507777650207322,0.14172867030333935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663716998707389,0.0,0.05182485994411869,0.09515608691570758,0.11274866593452955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771707728843774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036036726926949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648776149384915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16354356569585154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012755214330275,0.19384504465989813,0.0,0.0,0.08778371934298934,0.16659624088684688,0.0,0.0,0.1686626729091424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100567319642051,0.09965387676664306,0.108051531330025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291912866944679,0.294204881858925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943784521453407,0.0,0.0,0.20817519115267172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661252349329426,0.10363679566208332,0.10888541164577648,0.09377055341465874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177316278416208,0.0,0.19588455278664316,0.0,0.1123676583121192,0.08471127953144303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003897961659474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110397526132863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310072381215707,0.07458167127184867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13180039833238674,0.1271192382109062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032646296537608,0.0,0.0,0.2184967292912898,0.0,0.11701458346517085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845325356755996,0.0,0.06387779352715107
mentalhealth,whovian1087,2020/02/13,"Never really talked about this stuff before. So, I’ve never really talked about my stuff before so some small background: I’m a guy in my mid-20s from the US.  I think I’ve had some type of issues for about 7ish years now and maybe one thing for about double that.

Getting to the details, I’ve been somewhat anxious basically since I was a younger boy, like 7-10 let’s say.  It’s not always talking to people, I can talk to people in public when I have to for work for instance, but if it’s not something I need to do I don’t, especially if it’s a more “difficult” question or comment.  And even then I often struggle to come up with what to say.  The biggest thing is talking to people I’m interested in or want to ask out.  I’m in my mid-20s and I’ve asked one girl out and it was on an app.  My heart starts racing, sometimes I shake, get warm, and just lose all my ability to conjure words.  I’ve only had one panic attack and it was during college a few years ago.

I don’t know if I have depression or not.  Having read about other people’s and knowing what my dad was like when he was depressed, I don’t think I am.  Then I read other things online that say there’s varying levels and that you don’t have to be suicidal or immobilized/can’t get out of bed in the morning to be depressed and I think maybe I am.  So all that in mind, I often have little to no motivation, I won’t do things even the things I really enjoy doing like play video games, and I’ve struggled to keep doing things because I often think, what’s the point.  Also, I don’t really know what to make of this, but while I’m not suicidal, I’ve thought about dying.  How would it happen, what it would be like, what would happen after?

Most days it’s not terrible, some days it’s a little struggle, and some days I basically just check my phone relentlessly, maybe have something on tv, and lay in bed.  It’s very up and down for me.  I’ll go two weeks with minimal struggle and then for 3 straight days I basically just do nothing and it’s a struggle to actually do anything each day.  Sometimes it’s day by day too.  I usually just play some video games (if I can), watch a movie, or listen to music when I’m going through it.  I’ve never talked to anyone about it.  There’s not a stigma with my parents cause my dad was depressed a while ago.  I just don’t talk to them about anything because of my anxiousness.  I’ve thought about talking to my mom but I work myself up and never say anything.  I also fall into the trap of, well it’s nowhere near as bad as some people so maybe I’m just overthinking or overreacting, so I just don’t say anything.  I don’t really have friends to talk to about it either because I’m that friend that has to restart sentences because I get talked over and has to walk behind everyone else if the sidewalk isn’t big enough.

I imagine I’ve left something I should’ve or meant to say out but I spent an hour typing this already.  I don’t know what I really hope to gain from posting this.  So if you made it through the whole thing congrats and thank you for reading.",2.956380952380953,4.316061685714286,4.22111111111111,87.6992857142857,74.2063492063492,6.857142857142858,25.3968253968254,7.369714342285796,1.0988253968253967,2402,79,507,27,49,790,242,630,0.113,0.7709999999999999,0.11599999999999999,-0.2554,1,0,3,0,0,0,64.0,1,3,1,5,39,30,1,7,20,0,47,1,1,5,6,103,86,54,3,12,31,4,1,4,2,4,0,7,2,3,45,28,0,1,14,10,2,6,22,16,1,4,14,9,53,14,80,64,17,65,0,5,1,0,40,29,0,26,33,346,98,9,0.0,0.0,0.05060661289643262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919392215173441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722736771659781,0.08294277124776286,0.04315059476351799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717114558151198,0.0,0.03626081053724189,0.0,0.17070117391798162,0.0,0.09696177278590072,0.058996760617387435,0.0,0.0,0.04329985041742067,0.12645033474625614,0.0,0.08825587244473278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0532731725668664,0.0,0.044671680288818856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23411201047797905,0.0,0.17866329776941522,0.0,0.05382114572370117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043321291544743575,0.0,0.0,0.053583902349583726,0.0,0.06850436777189915,0.0,0.0,0.04955321255957036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801318097641704,0.0,0.10837612659228764,0.0,0.05894499138834056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05134826865227062,0.09171695864463247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061452812108947874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05150739275653981,0.05107037578625159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05412701205781818,0.0,0.04609439751284365,0.0,0.0,0.11400074660641794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056344631962909425,0.05302903680332974,0.0,0.10134217015734008,0.10395208727642162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058016623114092586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490699581617592,0.03461608658368821,0.0,0.20839614763106729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236250623365212,0.06073628555868652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038452570777316585,0.15998651330923194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04975982365049246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054223967087366,0.03944088006598398,0.0,0.060845013759060027,0.05758295202184181,0.0,0.0,0.179761473342386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04902323604180435,0.0,0.04966630189046329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05809361518051995,0.0,0.15561820849409055,0.0,0.19933207629581776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24744072992841515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0428980545707004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977008822969755,0.10257916551961786,0.0,0.036705856518812495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710698777306211,0.11873161446927395,0.11345000697372992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4168206066727821,0.0,0.0477445257918128,0.0,0.0,0.2411683231992986,0.1329158503034583,0.0,0.08234003416519371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05065841694247533,0.0,0.06237963386974904,0.0,0.05711503422104501,0.04278886061491588,0.03058760632551485,0.0,0.04159792304736129,0.0,0.04662720149431614,0.0,0.0,0.057898389319260994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550750605492032,0.0,0.0,0.11051680299323598,0.0,0.0,0.06679060826405736
mentalhealth,TheMysteriousThought,2020/02/13,"Went to see therapists for anger issues. Mainly resolved those, but because I have hallucinations in sleep paralysis, they think I'm psychotic... They're talking about trying to get me on medication...Anyone help me figure out what to do? Do not want anti-psychotics. I don't hallucinate while awake. So yeah. I have always had anger issues.

Girlfriend wanted me to go to therapy. I did. That got better.

But, I mentioned that I hallucinate and see/hear things when I experience paralysis sometimes. Like... really hallucinate, to where there are creatures in my room, or I hear sounds that aren't there.

​

ONLY during sleep paralysis, never when I'm awake. I think that I do have some ""funny thoughts"" or feelings here and there, but not enough to warrant me having to take medication. I'm in college for Computer Science, pay all my bills (rent an apartment with my girlfriend), work full time, drive, bathe regularly, etc.

​

I have been watching videos on anti-psychotic side effects, and I am highly, highly hesitant to let these things anywhere near my synapses; and I've done just about every fucking drug you could name, and a few you probably can't.

​

I think I am going to outright deny any anti-psychotics.  I'm not crazy enough for them, and I feel like they're just going to zombify me, or fuck me up more than I already am. I'm not about to be made retarded in some psychiatrist's guinea piggish pharmacological experiment trying to fix a problem I don't have.

​

My question to you all is, do you have any experience with antidepressants?  Or anti-psychotics?

This is probably about as far as I'm willing to go with psyche meds (antidepressants), because honestly, they're really, really shitty. *Meaning that they host a FUCK TON of side effects, I have tried several ((on my own)) and they all end up making you feel like shit. I do not know if this applies to antidepressants, as I never tried them due to no recreational potential)*

​

The biggest problems I have, from my standpoint, are negative symptoms such as depressive symptoms, and sometimes unstable mood. I'm not sure if this is something neurological, or just because I'm stressed from doing so much all the time. That is why I MIGHT consider anti-depressants. 

Honestly just talking to someone has helped me with a lot of my issues, I don't even know that I need or want medication of any kind.",6.134587155963303,7.9340602454128435,6.530630733944952,72.50883600917433,66.95871559633028,9.394954128440366,33.80848623853211,9.751328689232952,3.5667697247706425,1921,88,315,43,32,621,209,436,0.156,0.763,0.081,-0.9888,1,0,2,0,0,0,103.0,0,5,5,5,19,20,6,1,7,1,39,12,3,4,7,70,76,28,0,9,21,0,3,3,2,2,6,2,3,0,15,13,0,0,15,2,3,6,15,10,0,0,8,7,49,9,50,63,17,36,0,1,2,3,20,21,4,13,12,222,64,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921014818000935,0.0,0.052185854020548365,0.3397710777015445,0.3810421858817096,0.12794983286306796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04385342486549289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469573153189835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05546839370475497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05007469547307748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803671220897354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641816174547648,0.0,0.0,0.07273220708664059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0555489508971435,0.12960756259289696,0.06994641664641284,0.04142421391763485,0.0,0.0528420669230978,0.0,0.0,0.1840487895384834,0.0,0.0,0.09513532004228824,0.08961056553639205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17394352051219106,0.03276722344531418,0.0,0.1425748466593619,0.0,0.0501607889804068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137400869146058,0.0,0.08407622672195764,0.13252863377683938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19638183658635652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531046210911874,0.06893562363670908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06413273301642979,0.0,0.09192157825877467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05332004269820504,0.0,0.059344666914973664,0.04186431383203807,0.0,0.0,0.06831757335218988,0.06966483007811766,0.12636225086773173,0.0,0.06653319037370141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046104463863978734,0.0465041155584815,0.09674296350453612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047699365926366435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523980802513327,0.12002405524239157,0.0,0.0,0.0702577783215093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205350087547469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995520554518357,0.0,0.0,0.0708527464366135,0.06437845188818017,0.0,0.0,0.12552527454366758,0.0,0.053140201669848695,0.04828287516187814,0.12405811291116516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07184250514404909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05911035407261546,0.13037466799406036,0.04715563708468782,0.10081965011973704,0.0,0.0,0.07172274822741044,0.07281966980779007,0.08333323248717897,0.120560224006768,0.0,0.0497905651885091,0.0731419747744841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032383760091266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097694253968014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05813960581494217,0.05659264750087535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045658973069001664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810421858817096,0.0
mentalhealth,boreetbean,2020/02/13,"Reality has changed one too many times and my mind is breaking trying to comprehend it I started taking anti phychotics and my whole reality changed, the change was something I didn't know that I needed because I had never experienced anything different. Now my mind is breaking trying to comprehend some days are better than others but I'm starting to lose my grasp on it and I'm torturing myself over what's real and what's not, I'm becoming paranoid in myself.... I think. I'm not even sure anymore im spiraling out of control I really dont know how to deal with it",3.5964864864864867,5.8476537387387415,5.322783783783788,76.6712027027027,74.67567567567569,8.043603603603604,30.91981981981982,8.841846274778883,2.967496576576577,459,22,79,10,10,156,75,111,0.12300000000000001,0.84,0.038,-0.8774,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,4,4,1,0,1,0,8,0,0,2,2,22,19,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,1,4,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,3,1,12,2,11,16,2,12,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,1,6,54,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15744248486861329,0.0,0.0,0.13064199055223155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677568734931076,0.17533262922627282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14040606015351856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.503825807077019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17805743936249258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238396092685828,0.16366962496309712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586537915311494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18605989463777495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485630252950827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17148284247831622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744953958929294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776064441685776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095284012089628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32059496195168674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771495820205445,0.12244178572709538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075766220677062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18069815662309813,0.1017026367598665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222174975977779,0.0,0.0,0.2247354743018381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962488320450434,0.0,0.11936414189911175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172391238462984,0.0,0.0,0.09257142513082188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21556869949275115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17724449473489026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shprqness,2020/02/13,"Is my anger due to mental health? So, I am around the age of 18 (male),I am always angry, mainly toward the government, it's not petty anger, it's raw overwhelming anger, I don't come from a wealthy background,I am a man of colour, I've been mistreated by the government, I've been out of education since year 7 (12 years old), I get angry at so many things, at colleges, at the government, how colleges make it so hard for the youth to get into a course leading them down a dangerous path, how they act so prestigious when they are apart of the problem.... My anger is more like rage, I don't run around screaming,I just hold it in, I feel like that's making it worse... I am mainly looking for some advice on this....",6.976130952380958,5.382018875000004,7.100912698412702,80.79250000000002,65.1111111111111,10.450793650793653,32.37698412698413,9.23628265651192,2.491140079365078,554,17,118,8,7,179,89,144,0.215,0.737,0.048,-0.978,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,3,1,10,10,6,1,10,0,11,1,0,5,0,16,18,7,0,1,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,8,5,0,1,1,0,0,4,3,8,0,0,2,4,11,2,21,16,4,23,0,1,2,0,4,12,0,1,9,74,19,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149111029587035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829977197781065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3915651071124089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18944850415878628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120220836885593,0.15711661204901756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22980661278786904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970122958893023,0.0,0.0,0.2337731870016891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21489143032435615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846841354838187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29360730470450624,0.2229724798968551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22163570330202104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23077744733341896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104414006449976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819267199531629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14611039536583922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22412542797208884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832528515979782
mentalhealth,Cloudkillsgamin,2020/02/13,"Please help me with the pain So this requires context.

When i was 12 i was under the  the influence of a very bad person like really bad.He taught me some horrible things.After a while of being under this persons influence he had a sister that didnt under stand better and i sexually assaulted her. Legally i was 12 and didn't know better and i was under extreme influence Her brother actually raped her but i didn't find that out till a long time after.after it happened i began to regret doing it.

Fast forward 4 years i have matured under the guides because shit has happened to my family.The family of the girl has cut off contact with my family and me so its hard i cant apologize  or anything and i feel like i ruined this girls life.There is no psychical way to make amends but i just want to be able to forgive myself for what i did but i cant Constant thoughts of ""i ruined her life"" and ""i ruined someones life i feel worthless"" and its been a looming shadow over my life.It has caused me to have hard ships around girls younger than me.I always feel nervous when there is someone younger than me.

Is there a way to help me get through this and make amends with myself  so i can continue on with my life without a forever looming shadow on my back.",2.7387370600414087,4.831511714285718,4.135424430641823,84.92841614906834,76.69841269841271,6.922291235334715,26.03588681849552,7.893859768569023,1.6498669427191168,1000,38,192,16,23,330,128,252,0.217,0.715,0.068,-0.9893,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,10,17,4,1,12,0,24,6,1,6,0,37,37,19,0,2,6,2,5,2,0,0,4,0,0,5,11,14,0,1,7,0,0,1,7,12,0,0,13,5,35,5,32,22,1,27,0,5,0,1,17,12,1,2,15,138,46,3,0.1283451035312508,0.0,0.12524630704273773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679340764987844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561708449467484,0.11425435288491133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868946234508684,0.21432560094007694,0.07823798385646841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270216284383652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184577561247626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869546148392675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24198468237512616,0.0,0.19468542205282824,0.09168976760728983,0.0,0.0,0.11730509945996585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670550193462815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22699030237294304,0.0,0.2299440064330449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17205403499665248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053511238634617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.453269711198832,0.12540586924755764,0.0,0.0,0.11358137784028305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713427064463439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656823915987407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22413198780413504,0.0,0.1408843823660724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222115978632079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13174440440613236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174927794528511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189167591663044,0.07483906199305436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058981517998894,0.07570126736970129,0.20374873842055105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237200997984257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265003871461463
mentalhealth,InDaTrashIGo,2020/02/13,"Around Valentine’s Day, I just feel so lonely and empty. To elaborate, I’m obviously single, and my love life for the past few years has been a bit of a train wreck. If it matters I’m 19M. And around this time where everyone is buying each other gifts and posting on social media, it just stings. Don’t get me wrong I’m super happy for them, I’m not trying to guilt people because they’re happy. It’s just. Damn. Really reminds me of just how alone and loveless I really feel. Life took a downward turn a while back for a variety of reasons and I haven’t seen the light at the end of the tunnel in a long time. Makes me wanna turn back to drugs, seems when I’m high is the only time I’m happy. But ay here’s to trying to stay strong and sober. Hope y’all have a WONDERFUL and happy Valentine’s Day, I really do. Much love❤️",1.130601680672271,3.063652211428572,3.191563025210087,90.51561344537821,81.17142857142858,5.946218487394957,18.294117647058822,7.048011613610866,0.1523478991596643,647,14,140,8,17,219,105,175,0.087,0.7140000000000001,0.19899999999999998,0.97,0,3,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,2,13,12,1,1,12,0,8,4,0,3,1,29,26,14,0,3,7,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,11,0,0,5,0,1,1,3,4,0,0,3,4,10,8,18,23,5,24,0,1,1,1,4,8,1,4,13,80,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12774810308689186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21960619845574936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18968920750947166,0.0,0.07518989769636315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466066953216366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590944948818024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14304090842005612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924695834739727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11786132445934225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247337609822214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444261209394288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5252116991990262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032064422660736,0.0,0.12250930295256618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17424428153171306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915634272593523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226471507501315,0.0,0.08233366923381838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067268349862163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09380934398210176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177466505090876,0.08551181342451415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813030516983075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370536773091451,0.1268190859314922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122885517591248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573457815044378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146923698070734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21577018492473493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13704070685964653,0.16748616212761466,0.268327633315344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376226739154842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13485826990205765,0.0,0.07943006260172875
mentalhealth,RevolutionaryCharge2,2020/02/13,"My wife’s untreated mental illness is about to destroy our marriage. My wife (36) and I (34) have been together for five years and married for three. She’s always had some level of anxiety and obsessions about cleanliness and fairness that have been the source of a lot of friction between us, but the last six months or so things have been getting progressively worse and the last couple weeks have been unbearable. 

Last fall I was invited to go to a bachelor party for a very good college friend in Costa Rica. This party happened in mid January and I did end up going. Ever since I told my wife about it after I was invited, we have had multiple blow up fights about me going. The arguments boiled down to that she felt very uncomfortable with me going because she was worried about me being in situations where there would be lots of women around and I might cheat on her and since it’s in another country and all of us guys apparently would all cover for each other if stuff like that did happen. A friend of mine did kiss a woman outside his marriage at a bachelor party I attended, so I could see where her concern came from. 

I told her, truthfully, that I had no interest in going to strip clubs or any other inappropriate situation with women, and that I only want to go to support my friend and spend some time with some of my male friends. She just would not let go that since I would be in a situation where it would be easy for me to cheat on her and get away with it, then why wouldn’t I do so, and that if I did end up going to this party then she would have no way to know for sure if I didn’t do anything inappropriate and therefore she wouldn’t be able to trust me again. We went back and forth like that with her never believing me that I only want to go on the party to be with my friends and no other reason. 

The party was mid January and I did go. Other members of the party did go to strip clubs and other activities with women, but I did not participate in these. I had fun during the daytime activities, and then went back to my hotel room and slept when things that me or my wife would be uncomfortable with started to happen. 

I was open with her when I got home that I did not do anything she would consider inappropriate. I also was honest with her that other people talked about doing things.

Since then, we have had multiple fights where she’s just screaming at me about how I’ve hurt her, that I don’t care about her, and how she’ll never know for sure that I didn’t cheat on her. She’s said that even just the fact that I went to this party despite her feeling really uncomfortable about it has hurt her deeply and that the only way she can see to fix this is to hurt me just as much. She wants to get even at me for hurting her and the only way she thinks she can do that is to go out and cheat on me by having sex with an old boyfriend. 

Obviously I’m very concerned and hurt that she would think these things about me and want to be so vindictive that she would want to go out and “get even”. She’s always had some amount of obsession with everything in our relationship being “fair” in her judgment and it’s something that we’ve fought over before. I think it’s extremely unhealthy and that we need to keep talking and find a way to repair our relationship. 

We’ve been to a few relationship/marriage counselors in the time we’ve been together. The last time was about a year and a half ago. Each time, she’s found some reason that she doesn’t like the therapist or that she thinks the therapy is a waste of time and something we’d be able to do on our own. She’s flat out refused to talk about these issues with a therapist or any third party present. 

I’m starting to really run out of hope for this marriage. I love my wife and it really hurts to see her in so much pain and hear all these accusations about what she thinks I’ve done and threats about what she’s going to do to get even. I think she desperately needs to go to individual therapy and possibly a psychologist as well as resume marriage counseling but she absolutely refuses and accuses me of thinking she’s crazy and I only want her to go to counseling so I can trick the therapist into feeling sorry for me. 

I’m totally at the end of my rope and I have no idea what to do moving forward. I have my own therapist that I’ve been seeing for these situations and I’m leaning heavily on my mom for emotional support. I really think my wife has a serious mental health problem around anxiety, obsession, maybe self esteem, maybe even delusions, but I don’t know what to do when she can’t see that she needs help.",7.99300181607224,6.166529482646421,8.168637945820509,74.68778060838424,63.28416485900217,11.657004489734149,34.24012510719871,10.469840679313648,3.235577985168743,3661,118,740,71,43,1203,305,922,0.14300000000000002,0.721,0.136,-0.3208,1,0,2,0,2,0,55.0,11,0,0,1,47,46,10,3,33,0,90,8,1,5,12,156,166,71,0,27,19,7,3,3,5,14,3,3,2,7,59,68,1,3,19,3,1,25,17,23,1,5,43,11,119,23,132,96,19,108,0,6,5,3,95,45,0,17,39,550,178,1,0.08588812344751201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03806731962169465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03434235064522552,0.07146579906244628,0.0,0.0,0.05840686917355741,0.045030593079077336,0.06570417935121492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07067860745490906,0.07645863920788742,0.0,0.0,0.04034735962153608,0.06604266537366983,0.0,0.02617830143443152,0.0,0.03654223354731543,0.0483832517541554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049116566183396805,0.04378433299905104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034287338896313226,0.04751678748822773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04394668500317109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483062893265396,0.11410707664327413,0.0,0.0,0.14182073876724374,0.038845362423069935,0.0,0.0,0.038595353628226914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04342761586442303,0.0,0.04123303378298903,0.0,0.03925009441823788,0.0,0.0,0.047085947109759566,0.1658923778021144,0.0,0.1121824989993953,0.0,0.3904975987824211,0.036019441506678296,0.034346289175185306,0.0,0.0,0.04252137276228474,0.11392587587212692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04564752945749315,0.04840107864201189,0.0,0.028784499351463155,0.0,0.04307639535369695,0.04265314303479218,0.0,0.0,0.27583503759294803,0.04847861851696207,0.0,0.04482244322209281,0.0,0.03817065522052192,0.0,0.0,0.07080279971741428,0.1400205678897096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04391321266173967,0.0,0.06294089810964726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301901116671494,0.038758692353801256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628616415144591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655502733286617,0.0455568630951042,0.0,0.05029556606721693,0.03427754035765476,0.04564274139705509,0.06313765314806469,0.09552743287780438,0.06624221563757884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045062568810345226,0.0,0.0,0.16330447037225568,0.04569550945555381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029772005237614193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04841297712969295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04109166734741584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100442623431387,0.08830729555080262,0.0,0.13831755277458155,0.0,0.0,0.04084963679047514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17110428603709532,0.0,0.044800022129730666,0.0,0.0,0.14209508651832012,0.1930836986526196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612087354395478,0.0,0.04807236121762731,0.06079205583989434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04916067639695023,0.0,0.09746482466792557,0.08094853990509056,0.0,0.0,0.10355043036422587,0.0,0.0,0.0982205543864103,0.19944546229819568,0.11412050564139208,0.22013456597896286,0.0,0.0,0.12520513869059194,0.0,0.0,0.08206978260876753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331283738164168,0.0,0.0,0.1063000451642196,0.15197712148166714,0.13634798925911604,0.03444713596892558,0.0,0.038611868864137526,0.11942872636819685,0.03875033618417836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04361177923483668,0.04376366771034038,0.30506229323232625,0.0,0.0,0.0553091355474579
mentalhealth,ibm333,2020/02/13,"I'm worried all the time Hey 
I love my girlfriend so much but I'm always afraid to lose her tried many things to forget about this feeling but still the same :(",-0.003636363636363882,2.3447922727272754,0.5718787878787914,102.7178181818182,95.96969696969695,2.64,15.690909090909093,3.1291,-1.3669345454545452,127,3,28,0,5,38,27,33,0.27899999999999997,0.614,0.107,-0.7906,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,4,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,1,3,4,3,2,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039564466360105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847051873370857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4086740102708729,0.0,0.0,0.3296948906658312,0.0,0.0,0.37035391899552894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685353966735002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917267321860608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426871583199715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21300767391522413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24801274898269035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3709769322277373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway-account699,2020/02/13,"Am I crazy for wanting to go to a mental hospital? I have been struggling with severe depression and anxiety, and have had some suicidal idealizations, although I know I could never go through with it since too many people would be upset if I was gone. Yet I still wish for death. And I have a gut feeling that I want to go to a mental hospital, yet I can’t seem to be able to tell why. I’m not worried about harming myself, yet I can’t get the thought out of my mind. Any feedback is appreciated.",5.173795379537958,5.145910950495053,6.396782178217823,79.18283003300331,68.20792079207921,9.505610561056104,32.67491749174917,9.2995712137729,2.7451768976897695,390,16,80,7,6,132,69,101,0.22,0.635,0.145,-0.8803,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,2,4,0,14,1,1,0,1,21,27,5,2,7,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,4,0,0,4,4,4,0,0,5,1,12,1,14,18,1,10,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,3,5,59,14,1,0.194167108265278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204029189424052,0.0,0.1485373063641915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550266364284288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672358458330331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817672400775444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014443001167515,0.0,0.3310489266297701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670916479403113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968549720482798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3913495530802998,0.0,0.1960534285273076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975364391671606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461102495222144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676244295812327,0.0,0.2193535648697072,0.0,0.16061703842457126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15506210347652966,0.0,0.0,0.20298561975787116,0.0,0.2123873018453053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16971061088557898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541469952861722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290495823023362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520561444766866,0.0,0.22328259206607928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971861235391151,0.0,0.13793074278516193,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dorusus,2020/02/13,"Obsessively second guessing memories I know to be true? I've been having this issue for a while now. It started about a year ago or so ago, and I'm trying to see if I can find more information about it but I have a hard time putting it into words and want to know if anyone has experienced this and know if there's an official term for it or anything.

I constantly worry that I'm mis-remembering something or that my memories are fake/delusional. Not all my memories, but very specific things. The biggest one is shutting my front door in the morning when I leave for work. I always believe that I've just left it wide open every morning despite the fact that I've never done that and I can distinctly remember closing and locking it. It feels like there are two parts of my brain fighting with each other, with one side going ""Yes, it's closed, here are the memories, it happened 5 minutes ago"" and the other half going, ""But is it \*really\*, are you suuuure? Maybe you're crazy and you just imagined you did that."" And I'm so anxious and obsessive about it. I've ridden the elevator up 7 flights several times just to double and triple check that it's closed. I don't do this with all my memories; I'm confident about most of them, and the ones that I do obsess over are so minor or nonsensical, like the door thing or like not flushing after using the bathroom in someone else's house. Nothing major, and yet when I can't triple-check I feel so out of proportionately anxious about it. I can't stop thinking about it for hours. And I didn't used to be like this; like I said it started about a year ago so I don't know. Does this sound familiar?",4.157174796747967,5.446118823170736,5.209512195121949,82.05479674796749,71.1341463414634,8.393495934959349,28.910569105691057,8.841846274778883,2.2209508130081304,1306,50,259,24,24,430,165,328,0.084,0.8340000000000001,0.08199999999999999,0.3351,0,0,1,0,2,0,40.0,0,3,1,1,22,10,1,3,14,1,24,1,1,2,6,63,46,32,0,4,16,0,3,5,0,0,0,2,2,0,32,23,0,1,11,0,1,5,8,4,0,6,5,7,24,6,29,39,10,41,0,0,1,0,7,15,0,10,26,180,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38969628394917466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144968900115956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483225290882473,0.0,0.07684806813750603,0.0,0.09044237601175753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382519705449906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269022673575593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187681627330472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617852693791024,0.11247088058611718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181144919570912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09259962641203467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111424490305662,0.0785160893054881,0.0,0.0,0.1004510961859562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249229856548169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107264860122464,0.0,0.09718854850263993,0.0,0.09845321138606128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823419719752414,0.1268155094452065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471217132410001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416034559938697,0.0,0.0,0.11637343014232553,0.1194120057471202,0.0,0.0,0.2684699363468219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041425381472016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476544162769452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545672481523602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22342323311199785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901630683120645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048478998529247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040789930053556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24900167555936065,0.0,0.10454473690373388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757998343339146,0.0,0.0,0.12416126454412366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312207316283563,0.08461016879970899,0.0,0.0,0.1555825212404521,0.0,0.0,0.09188542555649816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460318765965415,0.07042262824064582,0.0,0.0,0.1281728731204339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461821920148295,0.0,0.1073611267717031,0.0,0.0,0.1898451086191496,0.0,0.09068306050919893,0.06482476316000102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800120830757777,0.1116137705065919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14155031668556198
mentalhealth,Daiyahoo,2020/02/13,"Mental Health Advice Needed Hello everyone! This is my first post so please be nice! よろしくお願いします！

I've seen many YouTube reddit videos so I figured that I would try my hand too. After all, the internet knows everything.

I have kind of a problem that is affecting all of my relationships, but I can't quite pin it down. My hope was to give some examples so that you cal understand better.

At the very least, I have a hard time talking with others. I've been told that it's okay since I'm ""smart,"" but I don't agree. I have a hard time knowing how much to say so that it's a conversation rather than a monologue or me talking about myself the entire time. I don't share interests with anyone I know, so that makes it hard to communicate, too.

Now to the meat of the problem(s). For example, there are a few kids in my choir class that seem to get all of the attention. That's fair; they're good people who deserve it. The only problem comes when they get a cold or some minor issue, everyone, including the teacher, dotes on them and are treated with so much love I could puke. Again, not a big issue. They are entitled to that love. But what I don't understand is why nothing like that happens for me. I know it's being greedy and selfish, but I have dedicated so much of my life helping them out and doing whatever I can for them (not for any compensation - I just like to make people happy) and I'm being completely ignored. I get sick for a week and have to go to the ER? No one cares. Sarah (not real name) gets a cold? She better rest up! I'll make sure to bring her whatever she needs. I understand that I may have done something to make people dislike me (see - bad social skills), but come on! I've had many, many mental health struggles ranging from anorexia to multiple suicide attempts. I've tried to tell people about it whom I trust, but something I do just turns them off and they don't care at all. I get that one shouldn't overbear friends with complaints (learned that the hard way in middle school), so it's not like I constantly talked about it. Additionally, these people were some really good friends of mine (we drifted apart - used to work 40 hours a week with high school). So, I don't understand why they get love and I don't. My teacher hugs and complements other students whereas he gives me a look of utter disdain anytime we meet eyes. I've had to stand alone for so long; I just want someone to care about me! I want to be taken care of, at least just a little bit. One adult I talk to says it's okay because I'm smart so of course you can't relate. My therapist says something similar but leaves out the ""you don't need to try"" part. It hurts to see them all happy and together when I'm so alone. I know many think of me as a really nice person, but if that's the case, why treat me like a disease? I use good hygiene (deodorant, brush and floss 2x daily, shower every day, skincare, makeup, started eating better, etc), but I'm still an outcast. I don't really care in my other classes, but here is supposed to be a safe place where all are welcome. (This is a varsity choir class, so we're all really artistic and emotional etc.)

At home I have issues as well. I take a medicine that makes me energetic, but an anxiety-ridden mess. If I don't take it, I'm constantly exhausted to the point that any task is nearly impossible. Recently, I've taken the anxiety route just so I can get stuff done. Music helps me a lot, but there's just this constant pain inside that feels better sometimes, but just goes back to hurting no matter what I do. I'm not giving up by any means, but it just sucks. I don't want to sound ungrateful; I'm blessed to even have a house to live in and food to eat etc. However, sometimes life just sucks no matter where you are.

I just recently got a new job to completely cut off ties with a coworker who sexually assaulted me, but it's hard when every thing brings up a reminder. He was a good friend of mine before it happened, so I adopted some of my favorite jokes of his into my vernacular. But, after the fact, every time I even think about one, I have a mini anxiety attack because he's still here. We just had a school musical which I was in, and there were a few ""adult"" scenes to show that the higher-ups are corrupt and are gross pigs who annoy all of the ladies. There was one scene that replays every time the topic comes up, and it always reminds me of him. He can't hurt me anymore, but the effects are lasting.

For more details: I have a therapist, I take medicine, I have a better job, I'm a high school senior.

After all of that, I need some advice. What do I do with all of my emotions? How can I get friends who actually care about me? Am I doing something wrong? How do I move on from all of this?

Any and all responses are appreciated. Again, I'm a newbie, so if I do something wrong, feel free to tell me but please do so respectfully. Thank you all so much! It feels better even just to put it all out there.",3.4331673684210533,4.776144302000001,4.50397894736842,86.20693684210528,72.98,7.623157894736843,25.85789473684211,8.162531300603469,1.47822,3882,127,806,59,76,1268,396,1000,0.16699999999999998,0.675,0.159,-0.6145,4,3,5,0,0,1,146.0,3,5,9,12,64,73,6,1,52,2,73,16,2,12,16,148,158,65,1,17,41,0,9,4,4,3,7,7,2,4,57,34,3,2,20,6,1,9,22,21,2,6,17,24,101,53,102,132,35,78,1,3,5,4,65,34,2,14,36,530,158,13,0.0,0.0,0.041445331845028376,0.0,0.0,0.08300386339003525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08797379040833431,0.0,0.0,0.035339071653428415,0.0,0.0,0.11552628316508252,0.0,0.06498002492054739,0.0,0.04211957819629627,0.029696540425680817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04831661677443912,0.0,0.03265739017042517,0.035461307656821935,0.0517795579028264,0.0,0.036139485646176216,0.0,0.0,0.22537159654734135,0.046367066247593104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25981060055857225,0.0,0.0,0.1097543882713966,0.08905956026041865,0.13768739922940512,0.0,0.033909443173046644,0.0,0.0,0.027390124412124517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692465882320467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869163734317662,0.0,0.09554776926681678,0.0,0.0,0.14209836034080298,0.08415460231306159,0.0,0.1431337763352744,0.08116525572346278,0.03816997739479643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442347174049258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036125603766410455,0.05135580731958553,0.0,0.13125120441533594,0.0,0.17751373876329096,0.12222545878106746,0.0241371096470312,0.1424898220989576,0.0339677437351723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751134993883674,0.09042182002873378,0.1902272785005336,0.0,0.0,0.09028885623405868,0.0,0.0,0.05693450564797201,0.0897453720566991,0.0426016316041062,0.04218304413369435,0.041825140051226485,0.049005550745977434,0.13639746964146854,0.0,0.0,0.13298530655116791,0.08429134492401352,0.0,0.0,0.04422675729870936,0.11670408527817733,0.03461933502824538,0.0,0.044970398820085,0.0,0.0,0.059996702623816164,0.08299626534306882,0.04256685546187137,0.03750245607291484,0.03758528300878184,0.035664738910560864,0.0,0.0,0.036107118391389886,0.11499454767900995,0.0,0.1417477987089634,0.17223472409103302,0.0,0.04626310453654276,0.0,0.0,0.08560106660831927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04513969282789464,0.12488357104517304,0.12596611114217993,0.0,0.04101852126123458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04075183628600697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389641871618636,0.032300924109265966,0.045191879306595295,0.0,0.0,0.04599169052374901,0.0,0.14721937488433645,0.03708382638562937,0.044372901082753886,0.09324027377432048,0.04014859263606164,0.0,0.04067524470721325,0.0,0.0,0.12191633445365685,0.0,0.04269484076490114,0.0,0.04517287734612735,0.0,0.048341018907091936,0.10883141651000904,0.0,0.08386949662919048,0.04559769822351616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013233506147388,0.0,0.17193069185635468,0.06768738841571018,0.03866378161010152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035132248641642334,0.0,0.0,0.04329358776374062,0.035985334143405594,0.16348031636191104,0.08400932826797322,0.0,0.030061020032925795,0.0,0.06783440197463042,0.0,0.0,0.044399656063639895,0.048618855131103984,0.046456114307330695,0.0,0.0400281853624388,0.0,0.09579816996820732,0.1365455411825617,0.07424262627725126,0.03910136644147325,0.0,0.09862364341506084,0.028215683438050605,0.05442709171788168,0.0,0.0,0.1238251982237842,0.0,0.0,0.04058262786173138,0.0,0.08650456739045873,0.046195987266425854,0.0,0.1768542212329312,0.0,0.07336219477422122,0.0,0.03504282199413635,0.07515105765527824,0.03371130964350163,0.06813495810478848,0.0,0.03818631060908565,0.0,0.11496975546111615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0309192165423233,0.0,0.0,0.030170006858459227,0.0928702100815112,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rot7purple7mercury7,2020/02/13,"What is Trihexyphenidyl/Romparkin used for? It was prescribed years ago when i was in a psych ward and im wondering what is it for. i did a little research but it left me confused. 

sorry if i posted this in the wrong subreddit.

also ˢᵒʳʳʸ ᶠᵒʳ ᵐʸ ᵉⁿᵍˡᶦˢʰ",1.6708666666666687,4.2857234200000045,2.291999999999998,93.47266666666668,84.8,4.933333333333334,24.333333333333336,6.42735559955562,0.7515333333333342,201,8,40,2,6,62,39,50,0.17600000000000002,0.8240000000000001,0.0,-0.8201,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,6,7,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,4,0,4,4,0,8,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,3,27,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738286880295293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470339628449398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336741173771798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3356299170969068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096074037505723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958488893312737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3457977008500108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667977045877361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3349980192240211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377428790207707,0.0,0.1989269033585504
mentalhealth,70times07,2020/02/13,"Unexplainable anxiety? Anyone Else?? So when I was 15, I was terribly anxious for no reason and then I had a panic attack which basically lasted for weeks. During that time, everything I thought of would be irrational fears but I couldn’t stop thinking. Eventually I got out of that headspace but I was scarred. It happened again when I was 18, and I finally went to the doctor and started antidepressants and they helped a lot. However, just last week I had it happen again (still on antidepressants) but not nearly as bad. Mainly, I have hopelessness, severe anxiety, dread, can’t eat or sleep, panic, every scary thought makes me panic more, I feel like I’ll never get back to normal, etc. I was thinking today, it was almost like I was coming out of my head? Like I was so far out of reality that I was afraid I wouldn’t come back? But when I would take klonopin, it would calm me down and I would be more rational. Basically, I just haven’t found anyone else who has dealt with this and I’m afraid I’m the only person on this planet to have had these “episodes” happen. If you have a similar experience, PLEASE share it with me (if you’re comfortable enough).",3.268552123552124,5.634920256756757,4.319343629343631,82.92391891891893,76.16216216216216,7.651994851994853,24.08494208494209,8.563005593585519,1.7383536679536684,915,30,174,19,21,297,126,222,0.192,0.6890000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.9325,1,0,0,0,0,1,34.0,0,1,1,0,12,17,1,7,5,0,26,4,2,2,1,42,45,20,0,9,10,0,1,3,0,5,1,0,0,1,13,13,1,1,7,0,0,3,7,11,0,0,17,1,26,6,19,20,6,30,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,5,22,124,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749881546239123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16424995011403104,0.12127866382216115,0.0,0.15012783665261456,0.21999226954018355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221298684416314,0.0,0.16509611108661287,0.08963551523307489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18495071185763226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098806440007319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984921918478567,0.17935980151160322,0.0,0.0,0.11092464867664596,0.1197272988932647,0.0,0.0,0.09044977918771033,0.0,0.0964822172754592,0.1050121197173468,0.0,0.12080230025062368,0.054281050381697615,0.07669321373677772,0.0,0.1176002847372908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770734434577344,0.0,0.0,0.056087664578607366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586023506162181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847964865167765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017544970959814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195664916934634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17501452356544686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734218852930115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912679304416808,0.0,0.0,0.07165915647212659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279747743104586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10518343355864666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164701660350404,0.0,0.3778678751829571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373675435373628,0.0,0.11784167776771705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037706453490714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127866382216115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074308219384641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598521309928973,0.0,0.08573247820365963,0.08975215963802112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071631580901405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13757531041954166,0.0,0.17045304580859985,0.06259856827074063,0.0,0.10175836896427336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17222467186518942,0.0,0.0,0.09951757783576408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050427959977556,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,piseoriez,2020/02/13,"How can I not be boring? I know that I have my own problems and boundaries but I feel like I’m unattractive in all aspects because I’m always misunderstood and I don’t have anyone but my mom who really understands most of me sadly. I feel like when I go to highschool I can’t be myself because I have different energies at different times, I want to be quiet and do my work but then again I want to make friends if you know what I mean. I feel like no one likes me or wants to know me for who I am, am I the problem?",0.7581572481572499,2.6676619819819862,3.015724815724816,91.4143488943489,82.33333333333333,6.198525798525798,22.703521703521705,7.348242739294969,0.8131909909909907,404,14,91,6,11,138,66,111,0.159,0.637,0.204,0.5339,2,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,1,3,9,0,0,1,0,12,0,0,2,1,26,27,11,0,6,6,1,3,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,8,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,0,4,23,5,8,24,3,7,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,3,8,66,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268818324139212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990539659475942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20906975482136045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35832795511672183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601219474836501,0.3675239881267482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248788826383887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745814372288512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827288854982035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335113113150331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446670741440568,0.0,0.0,0.1867960313775102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008396475342772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620179931672515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.328173500448185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985685513822704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999352980933744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17852058886675667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034366038435665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484218258300794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ben_jamin_2514,2020/02/13,I (19M) don't know what to do about my self harming habits  I recently relapsed back into self harming myself. I was clean for about 3 years at this point so I'm doing my best to make sure this was just a one time thing. I've been hiding the cuts on my forearm for a week now with long sleeve shirts because I've felt ashamed of myself. I don't know if I should just hide it for a few more weeks or own up to it. I go to music school and I always wear t-shirts when I perform because I heat up so easily on stage so I can't exactly hide my cuts for very long. Non of my classmates or my friends know I have a history of self harm. I know most of them look up to me and I don't want to let them down or start spreading rumors that I'm suicidal.,1.858172690763056,2.498151825301207,3.5242771084337363,94.43392570281128,75.92771084337348,6.738152610441769,22.86947791164659,6.816661863887847,0.3561261044176707,577,15,144,5,12,193,97,166,0.177,0.731,0.092,-0.9023,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,2,10,9,2,1,5,0,12,3,3,1,2,21,24,10,1,3,6,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,7,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,6,0,1,4,2,24,3,25,18,5,22,0,0,1,0,7,9,0,5,11,93,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379051978411666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12744035543988985,0.0,0.20206162308807185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17392916332325434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15913205354259052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280468222913286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419129381302922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3643355462643696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16947575929758701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.293341372409224,0.13917606335698113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062972121177968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230665189115607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15667360095984134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16364379402656848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677331560089172,0.0,0.0,0.5186947599668527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11730842721630247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18128771738299929,0.0,0.1562037304139109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010728988322488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664169238082404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13674912989813431,0.09775508135925268,0.0,0.265886013347747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106728216575754
mentalhealth,VinnieGognitti,2020/02/13,"I have trouble defining my relationships with people or remembering my relationship with them? I know it sounds weird and I cant find any information about it, but I hope someone can relate to this problem:

I sometimes forget how close i actually am with some people. Sometimes I'm extremely happy to see people who I've only seen once if I feel a connection with them. Sometimes I can discard a long-term friend if they stop acknowledging me, and move on like I never spent a second with them. But then I'll mourn a short-term friend for years and years....

I've dated and been close with people in days of meeting them, but struggled with long-term friendships.

The worst is that sometimes I forget who I'm with when I'm with my SO.....I'll forget whether or not we're together or just friends or more. I feel like it's some kind of memory problem. But sometimes I worry why I have this....

Can anyone answer/relate to this problem?",4.3619047619047615,6.0706838888888885,5.026507936507937,81.925,71.2222222222222,7.365079365079365,27.301587301587304,7.957251820313856,1.7161587301587304,740,26,138,10,14,238,101,180,0.22,0.623,0.157,-0.8684,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,5,0,4,16,0,1,5,0,9,0,0,1,1,47,19,18,1,6,13,0,2,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,9,15,0,1,7,0,1,1,3,8,0,1,3,5,22,8,18,16,4,13,0,1,2,0,14,4,0,9,10,89,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.11342680327493605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904253875109371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127293229077964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496077640268063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11754196238908575,0.08303699708421627,0.0,0.0,0.10623500807135264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694043673932345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373236665724947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544576036648255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210389560485763,0.06387870832703724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357130758203747,0.0,0.0,0.2057253887029156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353746080319608,0.0,0.0,0.08964618324144155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378452845318805,0.0,0.08840056048386652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223257690048931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336583269687361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495818426802671,0.1316695188863817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262278462060276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984839844431486,0.0,0.5747878667217123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717613143378497,0.0,0.12151214213065632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10488235349010994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11804042226370075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970069622491158
mentalhealth,RealAgileChihuahua,2020/02/13,"Passive suicidal thoughts and tendencies, subconscious planning  Is it normal not to care? If it seems clear, i will cross the road or turn without checking for sure. I'll walk as close to the edge of the sidewalk as I can, hoping someone will bump up onto the curb and send me flying in my final moments. I'll walk into campus, and be like ""hey, if someone shoots this place up and i get hit, so be it. Maybe i can take the gunman with me,"" without even thinking how I would live through the event. I have a blatant disregard for life, an affinty for death. My mind may also be subconsciously preparing for death. I am finding myself telling my friends and family how much I love and appreciate them as people, gifting them items, and making sure they know they are good people, and I care about them, even if my actions may say otherwise at certain times. I am subconsciously saying goodbye, and have multiple plans or scenarios in which i will immediately kms. Mom dies? Noose under mattress and a forest behind my house. Dad dies? Noose under mattress. Sister dies? Noose under ma-you get he idea. They take the noose? Two min bike ride from an overpass on a major highway. I live right by a main road. My neighbor's a cop, I can just break in and get shot. Lock the doors? I have three knifes around the house just for me and my wrist. BUT, all under scenarios, usually dealing with the loss of a family member. I know who I'll have look after my fam so they dont off themselves, and who'll feed the dogs when they cant. Fuck. Writing this all out I'm realizing how bad I am. I really should put more pressure on my parents for that psych.",2.7323399737081573,5.0645327021943585,3.663351198301146,87.12637273738503,77.77742946708463,6.373182323794116,24.71038527656993,7.4822170145007005,1.2449776721609864,1288,46,250,18,31,412,186,319,0.08800000000000001,0.846,0.066,-0.8428,1,0,0,2,0,0,46.0,0,0,8,3,13,14,1,1,19,0,25,5,1,4,7,59,45,29,6,7,11,4,0,1,2,8,1,2,4,0,9,19,1,2,8,1,1,7,5,4,0,2,1,3,38,10,40,32,7,38,0,1,1,2,25,22,1,9,9,169,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983866628475344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000068726125293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379963445422784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290772767093115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581813427650545,0.0,0.0,0.3497751432942451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13166224255410247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14839969638640838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21180927197451685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306353894868527,0.10267719209183973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867940003438313,0.10385699244938128,0.17607984138379024,0.0,0.0,0.09422589090393403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115794758106136,0.0,0.25925173378745914,0.0,0.12681876310341378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347881408487373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934942542213799,0.054883899274004166,0.0,0.19839745927126973,0.0,0.09433773579617327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139169749845496,0.0,0.0749881636191406,0.0,0.11286114317382802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343189171498234,0.13157184906163835,0.0,0.0,0.08258320185721009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006984890740126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474084317554668,0.0,0.0,0.15576553106691915,0.0,0.11737192383076775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293324249588885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196820817048193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593818281675283,0.0,0.17867536717890306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227058225665672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19037150130109975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12288228573976875,0.0,0.2117592047759992,0.0,0.16893216706995226,0.0,0.09819055846898976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719832635185113,0.0,0.08918581740107406,0.06550665554702886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219421688498586,0.10974035580784124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372720182930065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21658448799082136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980347600804302,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PM-ME-UR-SUCCULENTS,2020/02/13,"How can I build self-discipline while living with anhedonia? I'm dealing with some especially killer anhedonia right now. It's usually always present to some degree as part of my diagnosis, but I just quit crystal meth after using on and off since the beginning of November. 3.5 months is practically nothing in addict terms, but it still did a number on my body and now it's catching up to me.

For the most part, I know what to expect. I'm confident I can fight off the cravings and I'm quite familiar with brain fog and depression. But my brain's reward system is a little fucked for the time being and since I can't feel good from doing anything, it's really hard to convince myself it's worth doing. ""Just doing it"" and not thinking about it doesn't do me much good because if I don't think about it, I can't mentally sort out the steps and figure out how to approach it. Executive dysfunction can be thanked for that.

I learned about behavioral activation in group therapy a long time ago and it's basically the concept of going through your hobbies/daily routine even if you don't feel like it. I know that's what I need to do, but when the time comes to get up and do something, I just... don't. What sorts of reminders can I give myself that'll give me a kick in the ass? ""Just do it"" works sometimes, but not for the bigger tasks or ones that are more recreational than necessity.

Anyway, that's all. Any sort of reply is welcome, and thanks for taking the time to read my post!",4.824081632653062,5.785857836734698,5.715789115646262,80.26552040816328,69.27210884353741,8.873197278911565,28.985714285714288,9.120678840339163,2.314370612244898,1180,42,231,22,20,388,159,294,0.121,0.7879999999999999,0.091,-0.8803,0,0,2,0,1,0,35.0,0,2,0,4,15,11,2,0,14,0,25,6,4,3,1,50,46,23,0,4,14,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,20,16,0,0,8,1,1,5,8,3,0,1,1,3,23,8,40,42,9,38,0,1,0,2,8,14,2,9,18,163,43,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527871548119785,0.0,0.0,0.11000016732929792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325457549040214,0.0,0.0,0.08438688941222751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211723236498857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756453978583553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378383585232635,0.0,0.2770556667122407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689436402773936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12793351550139578,0.10688035163824162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196166764665415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548939771101086,0.0886514274564879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11472115516668782,0.06483300523381022,0.2380809166753989,0.0705244052421991,0.20816514701941016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116215547989104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639555562263714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062513631746715,0.1243728933736841,0.10957560571007828,0.10981761150428787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505565908534785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904913748720966,0.0,0.09122197832794396,0.09201272644990924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906972535759285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408802457994134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687593226945987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884593818423295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639744654187529,0.12412569007599775,0.0,0.07949658257837923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597398304880656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945513315884052,0.0,0.0,0.20530054977627624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553216809162077,0.12273026881709095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910011853489437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933018225061854,0.0,0.0,0.2284946833127853,0.14191014136340924,0.0,0.0,0.1590264256407496,0.0,0.0,0.2894364266950709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071757395432532,0.13666992645023254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090340533273847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Penanghill,2020/02/13,"finding a pathway through depression, when to see a psychiatrist? I've been searching through options such as seeing a doctor, psychologist, and taking Prozac (stopped taking after a few months, it was harmful).  I got another medication from the doctor but I don't want to take it.  I'm scared it will harm me.  I think I should ask to see a psychiatrist.  Is this going to work for me?  The doctor doesn't discuss the medication, and I'm worried about making a mistake with the medication.  Is it advisable to discuss with a psychiatrist first?  The doctor said I have to trust him, but in that situation I believe the doctor hasn't done anything to earn my trust.",4.861951219512193,6.938454747967483,5.995617886178862,73.98464634146345,70.62601626016259,8.497235772357724,32.62520325203252,9.120678840339163,3.1555437398373978,526,25,90,11,10,175,74,123,0.151,0.777,0.07200000000000001,-0.8326,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,3,7,0,1,13,0,11,9,0,1,0,14,26,6,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,9,1,0,0,6,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,5,4,10,2,17,19,1,7,0,1,3,0,6,1,0,1,5,65,16,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13356961235385362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482333846774006,0.0,0.119083618394471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435142586257463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097126803758508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6518969484256225,0.0,0.13035452741655845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642351427816475,0.10834983007954398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239330159787695,0.0,0.10187786163212707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08502750571906434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849675066252068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167393909237253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211680721441495,0.0,0.12753015146850974,0.0,0.3045174170980649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318107433977814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649584285699228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28732296088674875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162031252802772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513234823605812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273455691467962,0.12936113091447507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lavenderbro,2020/02/13,"i punched a wall tw: sh and relationship issues

i’ve been having a hard time with my girlfriend and stuff and i just got so frustrated i punched a wall. it’s purpleish and it hurts a little and it’s swollen idk if it’s damaged or not but that’s not the point i just feel like i can’t control my emotions or actions and all i can think of doing is lashing out and i’m not sure how to do it safely.",0.2115025252525271,2.0867851250000022,2.302878787878789,95.96737373737379,84.11363636363636,4.8202020202020215,23.41414141414141,5.82211442006289,0.21848080808080805,313,12,74,2,9,105,58,88,0.14,0.768,0.092,0.0062,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,0,5,0,7,1,0,2,2,25,11,13,0,1,9,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,7,9,0,2,2,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,2,2,8,3,4,9,1,7,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,3,2,50,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30863935630968936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30954205370635474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13913999180701647,0.1965896580105067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22008771604483726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24650849689057355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945873964206606,0.0,0.0,0.28721790310398443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13443973952185906,0.2758040707930009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601353838681907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29544185616673835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150168838397006,0.0,0.0,0.2593552271979849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632513952859244,0.0,0.0,0.16046049615979102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dopeshithistorian,2020/02/13,"CW: Disordered eating I put something into words with my therapist that I hope to god is more common than just my shallow ass, and I figured I’d turn to reddit.
So I’ve always had guilt around eating, for as long as I can remember— my dad placed a lot of emphasis on a woman’s value as directly relating to her fuckability, and my middle school self latched onto a “Kate Upton” type image. I don’t look like that, and now that I’m getting older my metabolism is slowing down, and it’s breaking me. I cry multiple times a day about how much I hate living in my ever-fattening body. (Please don’t tell me to “just work out”... I know. Thanks.) I also have body dysmorphia, but numbers on a scale don’t lie. My boyfriend happens to really love it, but I hate it so much... the first word of my recurring intrusive thought-phrase is “fatfuck”. Long story short, I really hate being chubby.
So, being a woman, I have a lot of friends who have eating disorders. Mostly anorexia. Really beautiful friends. 
CONFESSION: I am jealous of women with “more successful” eating disorders than me— let me explain.
I have always hated the way my body looks. I oftentimes have looked at myself, vowed to “stop eating” (ideally until I die, but at least until some of this fat burns off), and then smelled a particularly yummy snack, and subsequently broken the newest iteration of my vow. 
This makes my eating feel like a shameful failure of discipline, something an insatiable fatfuck glutton might do. Why can’t I just... stop? Just stop eating? It’s not hard. I can fast on Yom Kippur... maybe because I have accountability in that my community is in on it. 
I wish I could just stop eating. I want to be thin. I want to waste away to nothing. I want to die. But first, I want to skip my next meal, and I hate myself for every failure to do so. It’s been a lot of years, a lot of meals, a lot of hatred, sadness, disappointment, comparison with my friends who are also miserable, and a slow, lazy suicidal drag. 
This isn’t my only mental illness, and I know they all interact and affect each other. Please don’t give me tips. I know I shouldn’t compare myself to anyone. I know I shouldn’t be shallow. I know I should value myself for other reasons. I’m sorry, I just... I’m tired of keeping this to myself, because I’m mortified of making my sweet friends feel guilty for being more attractive than me or “more sick”, and I don’t want people to think I’m a horrible gargoyle who cares more about being skinny than my friend. 
I’m sorry for all this, Im usually not this honest but I had surgery today and I’m feeling vulnerable and drugged up. :)",2.9081745600468203,5.090538111984284,4.676053170588972,80.82665593780047,76.524557956778,7.4753333612005175,25.76102495506416,8.399286722034276,1.9581176357480248,2045,76,379,40,47,692,244,509,0.22899999999999998,0.62,0.151,-0.995,1,0,3,0,0,1,87.0,0,0,1,5,17,27,6,3,18,0,38,23,6,5,2,81,80,32,3,12,14,1,5,2,5,4,5,0,0,4,21,20,14,6,13,0,1,1,11,11,0,2,3,10,65,16,63,65,18,49,2,3,3,2,21,21,1,10,27,261,86,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984501109133639,0.1024364336165232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04304028868936816,0.0,0.0,0.05479649302448005,0.0,0.0,0.05783241326193037,0.0,0.0,0.0750460184385067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051192859340836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275884380418083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491462036500904,0.0,0.06761465101554771,0.03969751509896704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776756036170225,0.0,0.211640128923296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138359659765504,0.5038843920150516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055679506020545735,0.05186226212180427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337130798186513,0.04397449711320864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471633347832203,0.0,0.0,0.23778399974741424,0.0,0.032159649125719524,0.059048618186047015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05443237918966943,0.0,0.0551406787854353,0.3038612800123559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611374379400943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648934722656305,0.0,0.0,0.05471240566665466,0.0,0.0,0.16914352478774422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06294357514679114,0.0,0.06014477055744765,0.0,0.05435368944669243,0.10894746714473474,0.15507065503974,0.0,0.0,0.2616568760249768,0.05555527634825979,0.0,0.08217612004717366,0.0,0.06183969844373177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06203238771466135,0.06529952289683301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904991772323634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546383465761133,0.0,0.0,0.05906313574677604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0468149177873236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042674091357864895,0.0,0.06431127818966206,0.1351365594509473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187920362867725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830003220710858,0.06328820594757684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229636942541812,0.0,0.0,0.06421469504456191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477521503024808,0.0,0.13781028976828866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20584903892291767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733055576550243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053801284968306315,0.056671049073932576,0.0,0.07146943757311768,0.0,0.039441593304830914,0.0,0.04886734174795335,0.035892883158612755,0.07074776229802676,0.05834640229867445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695354407404043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779350833462923,0.0,0.18153198826247746,0.04885904143562294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05554329892372815,0.0,0.07078455673174414,0.0,0.0,0.04481235817219518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039639034798616295
mentalhealth,ChefDeCorazon,2020/02/13,"Mental Health Awareness  Greetings, 

I've been advised to post here to maybe get some information about a family issue. I'm not even sure what to research so I can try to help. If you have experienced or maybe know what I'm talking about, your guidance and information would be greatly appreciated. Other members of my family and I have shown similar behavioral traits so it would be nice to know where to start as far as “treatment”.

That being said,

My mother has shown odd behavior for a good portion for my life. When I was a toddler, she would bring literally bring the entire house with us whenever we would travel more than an hour from the house. She has a issue with hoarding, letting things go, depression, unnecessary money spending, food addictions, mood swings and teeth gritting has caused her pain and money.  Within the last 5 years, she has moved to 5 different locations. She always thinks her neighbors are watching her and know her schedule so they can harass her at work and other places. That has evolved into people stealing her gas and messing with items in her car or the car itself. She has told me that “people” come into her house while she is sleeping and inject her with needles in her nose and legs and it has happened at work while she's been awake. Also, people come into her house at night and perform “evil” rituals. She has had her locks changed, called the police and detectives and relocated. I've never seen any evidence of anyone one else being in her house.  she will scream out loud “Get the fuck out of here” or “Get out” while slapping or punching herself in the leg. She stuffs old newspaper into her bra and undergarments and it stays there all day, every day. Whatever she sits on, she has to put some sort of newspaper or magazine beneath her.  One day she shows up with HUGE blisters on top of her feet. She said she tapped (packing tape) them up because she hurt her ankles...

This is just a few of her odd behaviors. I love my mother very much. she is a genuine good person, thoughtful and kind. Every time I try to talk about it or try to get her help, she gets angry like I'm trying to get her fired from her job and calling her crazy. All I want is to help her and I can't if I don’t know where to start. I'm sorry if I sound ignorant, but I've never dealt with any of this and mental health is seriously overlooked these days. Any information would be greatly appreciated. Condition name? Who to talk to? Ways to persuade her to get help?

First time posting. I hope this is within the rules. Please and Thanks.

Much love, 

Chef",4.0873036336485855,6.118907434693877,4.531383773021403,83.86124688899952,72.61224489795919,7.311100049776008,26.032852165256344,8.096554002634818,1.6245500248880045,2033,69,382,31,41,642,251,490,0.068,0.826,0.105,0.9719,2,0,0,0,0,0,54.0,2,2,2,5,15,24,3,0,15,0,38,15,6,1,5,75,73,40,0,10,12,2,1,1,1,6,5,5,1,1,19,36,1,1,9,2,3,10,5,11,0,3,9,10,64,12,61,52,10,63,1,2,2,3,73,27,1,13,22,257,83,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685947493983161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056381809241471965,0.05866475320303095,0.0,0.0,0.1438348669033062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04929784891186817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04297842081310965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439843869195667,0.0,0.0,0.0724267542105809,0.07458360030345966,0.12146544508461388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18187629879991046,0.0,0.06072476131281405,0.0,0.0,0.07366139429046717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058896821488486364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04656705024221185,0.0,0.1188048705137969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292928826648195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059970438670574173,0.08525339294399976,0.0,0.0,0.06517956442178142,0.2578470313176661,0.0,0.04006889582058985,0.11827037123891418,0.0,0.15546122750354405,0.0,0.0,0.0623462176235053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988434104609905,0.0,0.0,0.1890286624012556,0.0,0.0,0.07002611437348451,0.06943197441207727,0.4067592052623244,0.0754757036112688,0.0,0.0,0.147175158135897,0.06996407539527258,0.0,0.0,0.07341878777529864,0.15498802974278011,0.0574699518256312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209484304239415,0.04979887116078716,0.034444562316707346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12726474208571578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166095086567748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421023589906918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493430968926315,0.10365671099579528,0.0,0.10875364952135748,0.0,0.0,0.06616297670206618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739818070359378,0.0,0.09555030730374167,0.0,0.0750209420412257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14663523217010513,0.06156113958149032,0.07366139429046717,0.07739192618296875,0.0,0.0,0.13504617300777674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087572421480516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413038920352333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055464924409781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789231560751132,0.09980580919373833,0.0751475978030035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070990560396975,0.0,0.0,0.06644893330764205,0.0,0.0,0.17000468814675598,0.0,0.06491036421913944,0.0,0.0,0.04683954693494337,0.04517594483666205,0.0,0.055972088096386735,0.08222258655071328,0.0,0.0,0.06736933757590516,0.0,0.1914696249584471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480730905146641,0.0,0.0,0.0581729628889194,0.0415849279944317,0.05596258101463505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265511360768848,0.0,0.0,0.2504191428460394,0.0,0.0,0.04540209204026968
mentalhealth,Ani_galbiheen,2020/02/13,"A gun was pointed at me for 90 minutes today, It's 4 am and I can't sleep. A handgun and a machine gun were pointed at me today for 90 straight minutes by a guy (the same guy - 2 weapons) who was shaking and obviously had psychological issues (he went to jail for shooting someone).

I was sitting with 18-22 YO guys (he's 22, I'm 20) and one of them started talking about how a conversation we had a year ago about religion made him not believe in God much. This guy then started shaking and apparently after getting out of prison he found refuge in religion and what I said made him doubt all of that and I basically I destroyed his safe place. He has a special ID card that's given to people who are not 100% there in their mind and got released early for this and for being a minor when that incident happend .

I thought he was joking till he loaded the gun.

I talked him out of it since the reason was too silly but he hangs out around my neighborhood all the time and he knows everything about my family, I'm afraid something will happen (although it's highly unlikely).

He then asked me to be FRIENDS and that he wants to see me everyday (maybe what I said later made him calm down and helped him - I understood where he's coming from and I actually felt bad for him for some reason), I said ok but I wouldn't meet him anywhere dark/doesn't have less than 5 people around.

How to get over this? The police cant be involved and I know that nothing will happen but this experience shook me and my existing mental health issues and disorders didn't help either. 

How to get over this? I feel afraid by the sound of the wind outside and I don't want this to develop in my head. Any tips from people who went through similar stuff?",4.07135838150289,5.257908760115612,5.018004624277456,83.7365329479769,71.22543352601156,7.8481387283237,28.579884393063587,8.238735603445708,1.8797705433526013,1365,51,274,20,25,446,189,346,0.08,0.863,0.057,-0.5525,1,0,1,5,0,0,32.0,1,0,2,0,12,16,2,6,15,1,22,3,2,8,3,57,53,28,0,3,6,0,2,0,1,3,1,4,0,4,20,25,0,1,9,1,0,7,7,9,0,1,23,7,35,7,45,24,7,43,0,0,1,0,41,20,0,2,15,177,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.09653246681855396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768735292173971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726956088808561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17612103365210685,0.09247762869724616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259476646307341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144990806366467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521154150416259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337184860712393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890366929876899,0.09676355941384852,0.09325376082347993,0.0,0.05001734711948549,0.0,0.0949795157971256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846159127827902,0.07642599281442662,0.0,0.15504616262706186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911602945483474,0.0,0.0,0.3917887213680664,0.17495073786465146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015213168024558,0.1051482233401996,0.0,0.0,0.13260910294660638,0.10451529478127836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064953055108388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087286093577918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28080386160590665,0.0,0.0,0.09937927602208964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09968893665634436,0.0,0.0998818455975477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727181967270628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491721042996076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703131883208836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057377579826311,0.0,0.10335121980517432,0.0,0.1870243288650212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034141901105799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822891041635005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882709928232744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182833808501272,0.0,0.09899227583922346,0.0,0.08381530366657147,0.07615409269107315,0.0,0.0,0.14003335428515298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324069106862195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901764247797048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853209453235775,0.057681535201760836,0.0,0.1875307727838248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669214451160775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18340121276577825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370177539085659
mentalhealth,SenselessHeart,2020/02/13,"Alone People say all the time how you’re never alone. How someone always has your back, be it a friend or spouse or parent or sibling. Let’s be real though...we are all alone. We are all on our own at the end of the day. Or that’s how I have always felt. I’ve never felt I had one person who is always there for me. I try to reach out and I’m left standing there, arm outstretched grasping for a connection. Everyone has busy lives. They have their own emotional baggage and issues and they live in their heads sometimes too. So it’s impossible to believe that there is a person out there who will always have your back. I’d like to think I’m that type of person for people however how many times have I been caught up in my head and missed one of their efforts to reach out to me? I’m sure it’s happened. They don’t know they’ve missed mine just like I’m unaware I’ve missed theirs. Because of all of this I have such an issue putting all my trust in someone. I can’t. I back myself into a corner and bunker down and fight my way through the darkness alone instead of seeking help more often than not. Most of the time I come out ok. Sometimes I worry myself more than others but I manage still. You can’t possibly put your well-being, your hope, trust, faith, whatever, all into another human being. You just can’t. So if no one is there on those days when you are desperate for a distraction, what’s the point? Just share the good times and laughs and then retreat alone to that darkness to fight the demons you’ve kept at bay in the light? It just sucks. It sucks to sit here and have a million things running through your mind and not one soul to bounce them off of. I don’t necessarily need advice, just someone to hear me so I can let the words escape and live outside of my head. I say them out loud to myself sometimes but I just feel that much more crazy.  Maybe I do need advice, maybe I need to hear that what I am saying makes sense in some way. Maybe I can’t interpret my own thoughts because of how scattered they are but someone on the outside could piece them together. Maybe I just need that validation that I’m not as crazy as I believe. That everyone has these spiraling thoughts sometimes. Maybe I just need to feel less like a whisper in the wind.",2.9301967963386697,4.609754582608698,3.470617848970253,91.74076659038904,74.91304347826087,6.2334096109839825,23.40961098398169,6.8360192770164,0.5798043478260868,1788,52,381,16,38,559,202,460,0.091,0.794,0.115,0.8158,2,5,0,0,2,0,45.0,2,8,11,1,31,21,4,1,20,1,34,4,4,6,9,78,65,31,0,8,19,2,4,3,1,1,0,7,0,4,23,20,0,1,10,0,0,5,12,8,0,5,8,12,54,13,54,50,17,48,3,3,0,0,39,24,2,9,18,264,77,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13068960822777226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34628689958537584,0.0,0.0,0.22256551639374328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701192551796979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425721235621706,0.0,0.08152692971325022,0.0,0.0,0.15067967549152705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576027726045565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05339042861996944,0.0,0.0,0.08625151848438492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521999592862899,0.05922716593219567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779471989589028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06762318393843744,0.0,0.12841179384803042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05166376534746565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056087567090260665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05913311385010325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20588441036480948,0.0,0.1507351936632053,0.0,0.04482169825524423,0.0,0.0,0.0664172158563546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395902704878096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036750123574167376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265468864083137,0.13675865911788498,0.0,0.09800823382537936,0.0,0.17714288558055985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0446363904614288,0.06779590640529701,0.33590061494347223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751985866841648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04915730517652684,0.2479171005238392,0.10314887067561443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18125196413115904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425146468115858,0.0,0.0,0.09271878026574487,0.17516548786956046,0.0,0.0,0.06321397135272655,0.07538612452659649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444607961662444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611294901554694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15953364645139073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266356783441839,0.0,0.2645454259696012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0534026433009018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630243900636774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442560218034821,0.04284773625633983,0.06569965068295486,0.10617496887521878,0.1559702499007809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04540048924810723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615693463452117,0.0,0.0,0.06012435770266266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790995338742319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,assmcbitten,2020/02/13,"Does anybody have some really funny videos to cheer me up? I'm depressed, stress, overwhelmed, and maybe suicidal. Not going to write out my reasons bc it'll take forever and not the point of this post. Can someone please just comment some really funny videos or something. I just want to laugh and ignore my problems.",5.077758620689653,7.499637465517246,4.802965517241383,81.28858620689657,70.89655172413794,7.398620689655173,28.84137931034483,8.238735603445708,2.267278620689656,255,10,42,4,5,78,46,58,0.205,0.5589999999999999,0.235,0.0736,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,2,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,16,7,4,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,2,0,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,4,2,6,6,2,5,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,3,0,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285447896216095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23220878415522356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15080400758618515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665788346735051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912736271911098,0.2508406663847589,0.0,0.2541310869899865,0.0,0.0,0.2539032509786651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399788541584834,0.27282306697263564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248294299736514,0.20427869972298776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30395649568225785,0.0,0.0,0.29024884573489423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995094988849132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650977318722945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bigfatseagull,2020/02/13,"Im 16 and really regretting asking my parents about therapy. Is it even worth it? Do i need it? 
Ive been struggling with what seems like anxiety for a pretty long time, and ive been dealing with it ok- I've made a bunch of progress and I've read a lot on how to deal with it.

A while ago i got really suddenly tired of it for no reason and asked my mom if i could see a therapist. It was awful-she blamed herself for it and i couldnt even explain it to her properly. Now im really regretting it. Is it stupid? I dont even know if I need help and its probably all just a teen angst thing. Am i gonna waste resources or the therapists time by going? How do I even interact with them if I can't properly explain the problem? Ive seen that over like 30% of teens have an anxiety disorder, and there's no way that many people are in therapy. I feel so stupid for thinking I need help while most people are faring worse than me alone.",1.3637878787878783,3.09859315656566,3.5393939393939418,89.27909090909094,79.55555555555556,7.8343434343434355,23.12121212121212,8.680891452615391,1.4892000000000007,727,24,164,17,18,249,115,198,0.21100000000000002,0.691,0.098,-0.9699,1,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,1,11,9,2,1,9,1,18,1,0,4,1,37,35,16,0,11,5,2,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,16,11,0,0,7,1,1,1,5,6,0,0,6,3,20,3,19,26,4,13,0,2,2,0,14,3,0,7,10,108,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494918461508088,0.0,0.0,0.12262053326881435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811422531777946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22136491531621968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452801761588353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441181402318871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568984207153767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875694852039758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127926219769509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05986359060792276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672860687881971,0.0,0.09469053979401268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871407635266022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557717878129367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506627533058337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568270809351165,0.0,0.0,0.10477501138019676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065439016330027,0.0,0.11202731572403524,0.0,0.1200329871966548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866168411553018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633630707002515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146258501398278,0.0,0.0,0.16415905848347884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204493154679073,0.127648813783019,0.11328711938330725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842609224641208,0.0,0.2275387862723061,0.12172880512367315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434473181823312,0.1077814994037243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377117044077475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707878358060261,0.2749292418193335,0.07865574811904541,0.07586212870606357,0.0,0.0,0.13807304896462558,0.13607654760898125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397568858837488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206536548306918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Troutindmout,2020/02/13,"So lads I have a Mad one I’ve been going out wIth this girl for the last almost 3 years, she’s a great girl always has my back in any situation, shows her love for me a lot. I recreationally take drugs, smoke a bit, do a bit of blow, trip on acid the odd time, I know paranoia can be a thing with recreational substance abuse. Never thought I was a paro man.

Recently, I started getting a few spots/marks on my dick. I’ve gone to the doctor about it and when I’ve seen him they weren’t there, they come and go. Has anyone had any experience like that? I’m about to move country with this girl and want to know it’s not my paranoia that’s not going to ruin it. We’ve talked about it a lot cus she’s obviously seen it, and she says how do I know it’s not from you. I haven’t done or been anywhere all relationship long. What do I do. It’s definitely not me. I went to the doctor waiting on a test. Any advice would very much appreciated.",1.9408500000000009,3.205471984999998,3.6810000000000014,90.93550000000002,76.65,6.8000000000000025,21.5,7.413659706084162,0.4245000000000001,727,18,173,9,16,244,118,200,0.09,0.799,0.111,0.6024,1,0,2,0,1,0,23.0,0,1,2,0,8,5,1,0,14,0,17,5,1,1,3,28,36,8,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,4,13,9,0,1,4,1,0,8,7,2,0,1,11,4,22,3,20,23,7,22,0,1,2,2,16,5,1,4,10,107,35,3,0.0,0.17186048161706205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417411403211074,0.0,0.0,0.1452465806252989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206931848583714,0.0,0.0,0.2959168364718029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142230329084148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115344643879093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31671397329523204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494769531174164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29692955683954764,0.0,0.14843646741753194,0.0,0.0,0.16821190109505124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418866919375064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578261639684307,0.0,0.2473057016165246,0.0,0.0,0.15991809088890166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391469907813445,0.11823507542062313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086408277673054,0.0,0.0,0.12836464847239487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24663257470105865,0.1309132503237964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15416515024379954,0.10662840887379654,0.0,0.11187146974160952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09828960553855076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432193346774492,0.15572937157994546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153495485690256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16304223027196502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10266710691912402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090595168095842,0.11658566193499932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963647469433044,0.0,0.0,0.1151534645027234,0.08457979703548778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11968140630222203,0.08555422340879631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344627643624012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303932855556752,0.0,0.0,0.09340741737391213
mentalhealth,mgriego1999,2020/02/13,"What’s wrong with me? So I’m currently going through a problem that I’ve been actively seeking help for but nothing is helping as far as talking about my problems. Throughout my whole life I’ve been going through depression, anxiety, and anger just recently suicidal thoughts. Not only that but something new that has been happening for a couple weeks is I’ve been hearing voices in my head, mainly just loud gibberish but it’s causing a real bad lack of sleep close to 2 hours a night. When I try to sleep I toss and turn because of these loud voices and just get right back on my phone to try and just block out what I’m hearing or doing what I’m doing now and typing it out. I’ve tried everything from drawing to music to watching movies. Nothing helps. It’s getting the way of my job as well (in the army) and I’m just so lost at what to do.",4.87974481658692,5.437088649122809,5.446996278575226,83.69846889952156,68.94152046783626,8.323444976076557,31.919723551302496,8.296473431620573,2.3039076023391813,673,28,134,9,11,217,102,171,0.245,0.722,0.032,-0.992,2,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,12,8,1,0,6,0,10,4,3,1,0,27,24,16,1,3,10,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,11,10,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,7,1,0,6,7,8,1,25,18,3,21,0,2,1,0,7,9,0,1,9,85,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535247740552242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589521823852403,0.1149872324073015,0.08395048648712497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14147242117390782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523802999951466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861471774854715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237703951628684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14390200815632345,0.0,0.15653452283730213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178193616943965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14133650047522492,0.0,0.31043221873472404,0.0,0.2769246961911768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13562266643072046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366620284071357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727298912719767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503334453579666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330071153301661,0.0,0.12923727713793792,0.0,0.2642847192997926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473933740591344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635515121577314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675112800884514,0.0,0.0,0.13597808341014248,0.0,0.0,0.1176088391865466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756312128696809,0.0,0.0,0.10602062007101368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063911529414648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069102435594667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933123964290913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805006767116833,0.14979562444498162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093126692970698,0.11046758820172638,0.0,0.12382335742600906,0.0,0.0,0.15375516276573026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505709904116194,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cudderloner,2020/02/13,"I feel like I'm not worth it. I don't ""love"" myself. When someone shows interest in me, I always think that it's because they want to use me or that because they don't want to be rude to me. I really feel like a weight or an annoyance to people.

Idk if having ""bad friends"" when I was little is a factor.",1.797727272727272,2.7153911969697013,4.039818181818184,89.6097272727273,76.42424242424242,7.098181818181819,22.29090909090909,7.554174236665415,0.7152218181818175,233,6,54,3,5,81,44,66,0.171,0.632,0.19699999999999998,0.2105,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,0,2,8,2,0,3,0,6,2,0,1,0,10,14,5,0,3,4,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,3,11,5,5,12,0,4,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,3,4,35,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21519628868169705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21594064140639632,0.3153101699881883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615366198355169,0.36952276612176294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998126348095714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527017185316615,0.2592096760797696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334186942038005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929765336139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16568146692284308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219131686043608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571612656228596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22336851686120346,0.0,0.0,0.3050868428109217,0.0,0.0,0.3149349476970576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wanderingwanderer2,2020/02/13,"How can I enjoy things again? I've recently come to accept I'm depressed. I have been for years. I'm trying to find a doctor that'll help me with what I might have but until then I want to be able to enjoy things again. I can't focus/enjoy video games, chores, movies unless I'm at the theatre. My emotions get so out there to where I feel really down so I drink. I find it hard to enjoy things I used to. When I get a new game or see a sale on xbox/PS4 I'll get a high where I'll want to buy then play something I purchased but then I get really bored easily. I know I might need antidepressants but is there any other way to manage feeling down or not enjoying my hobbies before I get meds? I want to be able to do the things I love and enjoy them before getting a diagnosis. What do I do?",1.2370175438596505,2.78503819883041,3.3472280701754364,91.36926315789476,79.29239766081871,6.197426900584795,18.417543859649122,7.0316486544052195,0.03704491228070195,616,12,141,7,15,210,95,171,0.062,0.715,0.223,0.9781,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,0,10,10,0,0,7,0,14,3,0,2,0,25,34,15,0,4,7,0,3,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,9,4,1,0,6,5,3,1,2,2,0,0,1,4,22,8,20,28,0,20,0,1,1,1,5,8,0,4,10,91,31,2,0.2739536571043203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314894055106493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23311438455551056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799340904039796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797794171786248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020158822833625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341851443578536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15408049554409334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851920041833116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503886795043865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4293884364503672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270433339167774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181268083088727,0.14472353991510314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527888271872687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362693570076705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215037730587835,0.0,0.0,0.2906215376502365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156658274433432,0.0,0.13229307457232092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17550172772533298,0.0,0.13524809318753298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915279790629492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545145470181667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640052735598476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299827519174587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830400031055473,0.0,0.0,0.2423774472819521,0.108725830758145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882085866258589
mentalhealth,Vixxene,2020/02/13,"How do I make waking up every morning easier? I'm on mobile, so I'm sorry for the format. I'll try to make this short.

First of all I'm 16F. Still in highschool but I'm graduating early. I've always been depressed but since the middle of January I've felt so much worse. I've barely gone to school at all, I'm missing atleast 2 days every week. I've been going to work because I just started. 

Every morning I wake up and feel like it's not worth getting up. This isn't really normal for me though. I've always hated waking up and had the feelings but I was able to forcefully roll myself out and just go to school. Now it's like I don't care. But I do because I need to graduate lol. I just don't care every morning and it's really annoying. For a while I'm starting to think its just because of PTSD because a few February's ago some really fucked up stuff happened to me. I'd settle for that but 1. I thought I was over it, and 2. I didn't feel this bad last February. Nothing has really happened different recently, besides the fact that I'm starting to get better at school again.

Ive also felt like I've had a constant cold since the year started but I think it's caused by my mind, if that makes sense. I've gone to the doctor and I'm not really sick but my head and stomach hurt every morning and it's gone by the time night arrives. I'm not really sure what's wrong with me but I need ideas on how I can force myself out of bed in the morning. I need this.",0.6375757575757568,2.699093496815287,3.002437753329474,90.48412758154798,83.77707006369427,5.84427716657016,20.98011966801776,7.106945922332613,0.5958377919320594,1154,36,249,16,33,396,146,314,0.17300000000000001,0.755,0.071,-0.9890000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,3,13,15,3,0,11,1,15,8,5,6,4,52,56,24,0,5,16,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,16,11,0,0,9,0,1,5,7,8,0,1,13,6,23,7,35,43,5,40,0,3,0,1,0,16,1,2,22,139,39,8,0.09008948177311156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798588899035776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204452602552404,0.14992333150628662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522095424038057,0.2196708476342016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967682558423538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18370446163381016,0.09254671407086268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735472492199207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058100262826782476,0.0,0.0775939386417702,0.0,0.0,0.09412433388413564,0.0,0.09221040201298193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3795213696066734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665584661161767,0.0643599437794405,0.17300006083904207,0.0,0.0,0.0766300671739756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328627421667249,0.09413607184042756,0.0,0.10239985720916296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15933166241376,0.0,0.0,0.0889447119679277,0.09245779911533324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964426535130967,0.101700059192433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343495172804437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203951059653976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180406285919528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096469496644086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622613493186505,0.2004006276452508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454287581520155,0.08826856432952812,0.08644328748806022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530978318364567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462817733812608,0.0,0.08895249477488502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735260956068237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904590056347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084779911049098,0.2550631955481053,0.0,0.07194557651733463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031309029105392,0.0,0.0,0.08490827040593467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545140453274205,0.08851245843279944,0.07152098543508502,0.05253190130232255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611648444950471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226434816461957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558621569137463,0.0,0.09180887848655006,0.0,0.09849870583511856,0.0,0.0580146725622005
mentalhealth,Kwazy7,2020/02/14,"Derealisation/Depersonalization I've recently been diagnosed with derealisation and depersonalization. I've had them for years, but recently these ""attacks"" have been getting stronger. I've developed anxiety every time I exit from my house or think about it because I'm scared that I will get them outside and this is preventing me to have a social life. My parents won't let me go to a psychology because ""I'm too young"" (17). 
Do you have any advice on how to deal with derealisation and depersonalization?",7.843183520599254,9.489699179775283,9.287134831460676,54.89826779026218,62.82022471910114,11.776029962546813,37.305243445692895,11.538034831475384,4.921200749063672,413,20,66,13,6,144,62,89,0.083,0.8759999999999999,0.04,-0.3919,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,2,0,3,2,1,1,2,0,11,2,0,1,0,10,17,6,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,9,0,9,11,0,8,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,5,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21733387412497931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512446147569379,0.0,0.17014100283934108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25302045180372795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27115489472146537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292921969429256,0.0,0.2257387638119278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873877724396261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323973064636116,0.0,0.12639921409726745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566282040922486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274265690231921,0.15709287837225744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469570258483795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4392008246093789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226685420270685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267162700427541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425096401214365,0.0,0.0,0.12968750583481534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432230320984525
mentalhealth,Grillos,2020/02/14,"I'm having a slight panic attack on an Uber and I don't know what to do I got scolded by my boss right before leaving work and now I'm in an Uber going to a friend's birthday party and we're stuck in traffic because of Carnaval, and I'm working really hard to not let the driver know, how can I calm myself down??",2.330434782608698,3.1033524782608737,4.499246376811595,87.38452173913046,74.94202898550725,6.0997101449275375,23.94492753623189,5.6839178017228535,0.5168527536231888,247,7,53,1,5,86,51,69,0.155,0.7709999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.6655,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,2,4,1,1,5,0,5,0,0,2,0,9,13,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,1,5,2,9,10,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,32,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3184394159045451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063127837931089,0.0,0.2381838271910469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21625871005158356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15907999381469107,0.0,0.22387056869316785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25074546811757525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30766376646899163,0.0,0.0,0.29638556027453866,0.0,0.2862281814953781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284155000949116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17931829161021515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390426478610689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4075573959132148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shastrinihar602,2020/02/14,"I don't know what to do Hey there, I don't really know what to do right now. I'm 18 and I'm starting college but I'm living home with my parents and I was born in a Asian household who are the main cause of my mental health problems. I was always viewed as a trophy or a child they could brag about to there friends. They never once hugged me I remember or shown actual affection for me and scream at me for petty things all the time. I have been feeling depressed for two years now and I don't think I can take it anymore. I want to move out but I make only 800 a month and it will be two years until I finish my degree and find a stable job. Honestly, I scream at my parents when I get home in arguments and am very short tempered but outside of my house, I have never lost my temper at someone so Idk. Right now uplifting music is probably the only thing keeping me alive.

I live in the US",1.5483473389355744,3.2840218677248707,3.2929723000311237,91.25535014005604,79.0,6.140180516651106,21.699657640834108,7.048011613610866,0.5282621226268279,699,20,153,8,17,233,113,189,0.13,0.731,0.138,0.1418,3,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,1,0,2,1,8,10,2,0,9,0,17,2,0,3,3,30,31,16,0,3,5,2,1,0,1,1,1,2,2,1,7,9,0,1,6,0,0,1,5,7,0,2,4,4,28,3,20,24,2,25,0,2,1,1,9,10,0,2,14,106,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.1331296807774105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351530121130675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352954784080162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14014453945655736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892308358990656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750138192097015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897983315671558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468863005548525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540047677022264,0.0,0.07127566098254204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450118273047394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736878371372885,0.0,0.0,0.15741443093103796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353792977697998,0.12125949703590058,0.0,0.0,0.1499496027837178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24092894341030194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14892239271646449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106376208344252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374828257423933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889195585938824,0.14499661672485434,0.0,0.0,0.2104364649847016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528660142356906,0.0,0.20751247602799824,0.0,0.0,0.3029643590879065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708763353463075,0.13053888873867892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739640324697337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545412593086156,0.2330098893770648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559120976744487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656127295085996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257351245745043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18126745579308196,0.08741468608742263,0.0,0.0,0.07954965434163573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26653192103738343,0.0,0.1641007028288361,0.0,0.0,0.11256369530501463,0.08046612947984802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17570455417200698
mentalhealth,Chickenqueen33,2020/02/14,"Harming my mental state and making me confused. I have a family member who hates me yet wants me to communicate. I guess some of the things I tell this person are unimportant because the person sometimes starts and argument or brings it up later but against me. I don't know what to think or do.


Send help please!",4.195,6.232968500000003,4.626666666666669,83.265,72.33333333333334,7.466666666666668,25.333333333333336,8.238735603445708,1.643733333333333,250,8,46,4,5,79,48,60,0.152,0.745,0.10300000000000001,0.126,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,1,3,0,4,0,0,1,0,12,12,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,9,0,5,12,1,7,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,5,3,33,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667853306247465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579277562296419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30140361344290395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701254782354468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338975327433565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150364585846083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826315590980664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757266144081961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4777976865824326,0.0,0.3003329985585501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27059952147586713,0.0,0.1936570093749287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391403378402529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817691104991678,0.17531320959028104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137763634260766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,2fuckingbored,2020/02/14,"Advice for dealing with my moms depression My mom has always had some mental health issues. A little background on our relationship, I'm 25, 2 years ago I was going through some mental health issues in the city I lived in and decided I needed a fresh start, she wanted me to move to where she lived and I did. I moved into her place with intentions to get apartment once I settled in, but two natural disasters later her house got fucked, I lost my job. We started to recover, I got a new job (a better one) re enrolled in school, and felt like my mental health was getting a bit better. But we're still living in a house that is pretty fucked up, and this isn't uncommon for where we live. The process of getting rebuilt is slow. We talk almost everyday. Sometimes small talk, sometimes sit down and talk in the dining room. Lately though, shes just unloading all of her problems on me. Everyday I have to hear about how powerless, how hopeless, how tired she feels. Today I had a long day, it rained and thundered all day and that triggers anxiety attacks and makes me irritable. (she knows this) We were talking today, she was unloading her problems and I dont know why but I said ""Thats stupid, stop worrying about it"" 

I feel really bad for being so callous about her problems, but its almost like her negativity and unloading of problems on me is starting to make my depression worse. Every time we talk I just leave feeling emotionally drained. All i've been doing lately is sleeping, working, and smoking tons of weed. I just cant handle someone elses problems when I can hardly get excited or feel good about anything myself.",4.731577669902912,6.524220187702267,5.355521844660196,79.59794296116506,70.42394822006473,7.997896440129449,30.027103559870554,8.59863814320734,2.467182200647249,1294,53,228,22,24,417,176,309,0.259,0.6559999999999999,0.086,-0.9969,3,0,0,0,0,1,39.0,6,0,0,4,16,20,4,0,10,0,21,8,1,7,3,57,48,22,0,7,8,2,6,2,0,0,4,3,1,0,8,19,1,1,8,0,0,3,4,14,0,2,13,9,44,6,32,34,7,44,0,4,0,2,29,19,2,5,23,151,52,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256828483902973,0.06582907067854707,0.0,0.14872598330778602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179220371086355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05681047561754377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06111156619179073,0.0,0.0,0.08448411592770927,0.0,0.0,0.06200593971662425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135798379265787,0.08107522549388815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578611254637742,0.07656119657422826,0.12792406398945205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703489221750661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062036643685239014,0.08353512056790187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06256921200387848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019705209350534,0.0,0.07130347821085885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13730864625295944,0.155195999695625,0.0,0.04220499086472481,0.06228771514014365,0.11878873112834293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652445689431563,0.0,0.0,0.2368121375096126,0.08369903787570834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17137750557545972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550211473870488,0.14738779806350694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162526375476548,0.0,0.16754227523769766,0.07863307989812132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725616420489961,0.07443035940010786,0.2622999752842062,0.0657198210237589,0.0,0.0,0.08106610060184909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991413576371184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22451687176176746,0.0,0.0,0.1739502757934899,0.0,0.15785819854135702,0.0,0.05506457326255007,0.0,0.0717230165678871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908695282332565,0.05032207357213745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758832404646719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555148265516014,0.0,0.3552950800048951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047574347206117834,0.0,0.0,0.0797299455120419,0.0,0.0,0.07064047729645362,0.0,0.0,0.07515743791692739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431595669978151,0.0,0.06292222726731106,0.0,0.14689467728119548,0.0,0.1576897682979196,0.0,0.05930598894233145,0.06208662922817078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984462204931891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729623575927479,0.0,0.0433029591055476,0.0853536185449991,0.14078400230654411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254350111590653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043801843554005696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670101978504411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406385730504018,0.07541699615832972,0.07567965392589926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04782250273076701
mentalhealth,mindfuldreamertoo,2020/02/14,"I keep fucking up. I try so hard to be my best but I feel this constant reminder that I am not good enough. I painted my daughters room to save money instead of hiring someone. I did a good job taping the baseboards and crown molding but of course as soon as I clean up and move everything out, I spilled the can of paint on our new carpet. Right at the top of the stairs. These dumb accidents are co frequent now I feel useless. I’m a housewife. I feel stupid. I didn’t go to college...I’m basically riding the coattails of my successful husband. He’s so smart and does everything so good. All I do is fold clothes, cook food that my kids turn their noses to, clean, and yet my house still feels messy, dirty, unorganized. I never get to do my hair or makeup or dress up because I have no where to go. I’m incredibly UNDERwhelmed and jealous my husband goes traveling once in a while for work and stays at nice hotels and gets to be with other adults. I’m so jealous. Anyway, I’m an idiot, stupid, fat cow. That’s what I have convinced myself and my day started out great. If I didn’t have my kids and family I would have ended my life by now.",1.7429179160419783,3.898331788793104,3.043050974512745,91.21139430284859,80.25,5.758920539730136,23.880059970014987,6.895973343053719,0.7847287856071965,893,32,188,10,23,289,143,232,0.2,0.6559999999999999,0.14400000000000002,-0.9345,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,0,1,5,12,18,7,0,9,0,16,7,3,0,2,27,32,21,0,2,6,3,6,0,0,1,2,0,4,3,7,12,3,1,4,3,1,5,5,8,0,0,3,7,30,10,26,26,3,33,0,1,0,1,9,14,2,3,13,121,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551451814538807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16443261191671413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16932223351885686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010497053712195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371172427267763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13877756061776958,0.1618988395258969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816390982191318,0.0,0.14770990506367748,0.0,0.3169012178947317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894657037938848,0.0,0.0,0.14485396556901292,0.16372425633665494,0.0,0.1780968776662915,0.3942631199346656,0.0,0.17274720609048355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036015431561047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807949606188468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15548698212821913,0.1392699885366365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067217206026277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653274706510549,0.0,0.0,0.12084613899327327,0.1513286112120057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668658027568493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133809249649366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13275979904882698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109033742154464,0.16700675497476405,0.12512988678749842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637971696836894,0.17042970788911654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406949727207767,0.0,0.0,0.11130545660265244,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kingarthersixties,2020/02/14,"I need other people to like me so that I feel good about myself, how do I stop? There are certain people I find myself idolizing? I guess would be the word for it (real life people, not celebrities- just people I talk to online sometimes or irl), and I want them to like me SOO bad. If I get any indication I'm not their favorite person or just that they don't like me I get upset and feel like shit. What is this called and how can I not be this way?  It's so annoying. I want people to like me. I want them to think highly of me, I want to be seen a certain way (as cool for ex), and if I'm disliked or if I'm viewed as a way I don't want to be viewed, my self esteem gets hit. I want to not give a shit, but idk how.   


I think this is connected, but I don't know what my personality is? I'm taking a break from social media to work on myself (lmao cliche as shit but I think I need it), but I need some help w this if anyone has any advice? 

​

Idk if mentalhealth is the right place for this, but I think my problem might be a mental thing more than a social thing tbh. I do have social anxiety, but I think this is more than that?",1.059899749373436,2.4178896882591125,3.09026026604974,93.85618083670715,79.24291497975709,5.838365143628303,17.83477925583189,6.42735559955562,-0.33930021206863303,871,15,209,7,21,295,112,247,0.13,0.76,0.11,-0.8937,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,4,1,9,16,4,1,8,1,21,4,3,3,2,55,50,26,0,16,20,1,2,5,0,2,1,0,0,3,17,4,0,1,9,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,1,6,38,9,21,41,3,9,0,0,3,0,15,4,3,11,6,138,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491335339013704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523925167535884,0.11802238957536736,0.1321021274440207,0.0,0.074303433800459,0.0,0.0,0.06791486855599813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810986739133489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917958823355666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982227009714338,0.0693889906922817,0.0,0.0,0.08877416386796033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15223771096961422,0.09317500566647748,0.0,0.08146721301288082,0.0,0.0,0.10699856502268576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510353414835703,0.10262214149142143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05337956878479524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686050986761763,0.2372616629165835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788320632005004,0.10303854015280556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160598109603352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3366851609933517,0.16961862617205747,0.10147915216000952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293935377164828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055408804788083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294765165520751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132675003158648,0.0,0.2991046271461104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29703240985094703,0.0,0.0,0.09606308352778936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120420916392401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07302893454966937,0.07806862641567032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905640889103184,0.3111817678860521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437352721456239,0.2312894832667846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071108274654146,0.0,0.0,0.06899766844066132,0.0,0.11802238957536736,0.0
mentalhealth,ThePhantomHorse,2020/02/14,What aspects of 13 Reasons Why do you consider inaccurate or problematic? Title. I’m making a sort of exposé on the shows (at least in my opinion) problematic and inaccurate depiction of mental health and Suicide and would like to hear the communities thoughts.,6.489000000000001,9.400510288888887,7.6774999999999975,60.05625000000003,68.33333333333333,10.722222222222225,37.91666666666667,10.686352973137794,5.294666666666668,213,12,30,7,4,72,38,45,0.19899999999999998,0.753,0.048,-0.8316,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,2,0,10,6,4,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,7,4,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,3,1,20,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36889604960509453,0.3911485883215257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16955023960911025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23165739456661705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497429985371746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568233907416119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796144455202973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755175362922649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131570560138217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24653311185585544,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nedroog,2020/02/14,"How can I help my friend? Hello  
I have a friend that suffers but I don't know what to do to help. He just moved out of his parents house at 29 years old and has never had a steady job. for the last 10 years he has gotten quite active in drinking. He does not drink much in the weekdays, but usually start early and drink through the Saturdays. The last time I saw him drink was at a party, and he was then completely smashed at 19.00.  
I know something is wrong, and I know something needs to be done but I don't know how to approach it. My explaining might not be too good but I know he does need some kind of help. I'm sure he will not seek professional help on his own and he will probably not listen if I say it straight out.",2.399705882352944,3.6686610784313767,3.2648529411764717,94.36433823529413,75.47058823529412,6.668627450980392,23.20751633986928,7.1686216300943375,0.529414379084967,567,16,133,6,12,180,90,153,0.057,0.763,0.18,0.9597,2,0,6,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,7,0,17,4,0,2,2,31,30,13,0,3,10,1,0,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,4,7,4,0,6,4,0,2,7,2,0,0,6,3,14,5,16,19,3,23,0,1,1,0,21,9,0,3,12,81,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13160652133260076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21968878126054936,0.12845170055066416,0.0,0.4918517014689638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939546342167764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528117226780924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3365366822028224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14483453636661844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456035771407307,0.0,0.0,0.13071094581838413,0.3449156641657081,0.2046329553208064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13315808771236493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340910127402944,0.09227247646849468,0.1861446614461436,0.09680963702127723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171331567904354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393763653833301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13533301287722574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350717719072913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981944416505792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193264603416698,0.0,0.0,0.08884450501831817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183021837386812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319238291273983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13824379610573415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723765588462675,0.0,0.1616629904290963
mentalhealth,arachnomancer1,2020/02/14,"I think im losing control Hello, im just new here and i dont know if this belongs here.
The last few months i am got the feeling that im losing control over my own mind. Just something in my mind is acting crazy, and i just stopped to care about a lot of stuff. Things dont seem normal anymore and i start to hate more and more things. Because of that  im less happy all the time, and it scares me more and more. 
If been trying to figure out what is happening, but i dont see anything why it would happen. I mean, im doing good on school(studying physics) and my family is good. Idont have a lot friends, only some close ones.

But i dobt know what it is, and it is starting to scare me and freak me out. Does anybody have some tips for me on what i should do, or shouldnt, because it is getting more and more crazy here",2.4511007957559703,3.4467290172413816,3.3966666666666683,94.54961538461541,74.91954022988506,6.043501326259947,23.154730327144122,5.8734145424116955,0.18233297966401407,635,17,148,3,13,203,93,174,0.124,0.779,0.098,-0.3912,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,4,7,11,1,2,5,0,18,0,0,2,1,42,33,15,0,6,8,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,14,13,0,3,7,0,0,1,4,6,0,1,2,2,16,5,14,28,14,15,0,2,1,0,2,7,0,8,7,103,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110187237461987,0.0,0.0,0.08389190418710865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428923742560477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393954270240016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228679578130402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921260279234035,0.0,0.3584357247168979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961045075505069,0.0,0.05154636629615277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876231841622107,0.0,0.05326196311115361,0.0,0.0,0.17101296386911435,0.08153458887841299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18029894300892088,0.10852216118856768,0.0,0.10064940835428918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5505895206477399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205241876262252,0.08309863824865289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281003639675309,0.0,0.17333968818057124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104779987845498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058704228038206,0.0,0.08137138619457605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845894662624223,0.0,0.0,0.09988428293806874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908045133979054,0.07753363273624743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20412910720748076,0.10317360482772936,0.08123682617479551,0.09280673931840062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848210636657225,0.0,0.0,0.1443141427796637,0.0,0.0,0.08523043795283916,0.0,0.0,0.11670243380778304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13545522287150125,0.06532212709892325,0.0,0.0,0.05944484690344728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921384390708285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198934748269576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241867828613655,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imamcrnutorbu123,2020/02/14,"Just talk I dont know where to put this story. Welll first of all you can see im new. Only a new account. Im that paranoid. Well i drink. A lot. And smoke till i pass out. The green tee of course. Just wanna test my abilities. I dont have excuses but becasue mainly i dont want to be aware of myself. I either sleep more than 12 h (24 max ) or dont at all (insomina). Im diagnosed with depression and anxiety for now. Not to sound pessimistic but thaths the truth. I just fall apart with every step. I hate my guts with everything i have. First of all im not poor, i go to college, i have friends and i have an only mother that cares for me. Isnt that sad i feel this way? I feel stupid even being on this page asking for anything. I somehow think this is the curse of our geneeation.. Theres so much to talk about with kids my age. Trust me i know. Ive been here a long time. Even if its only 22 years of my life i know mostly whats going on. So talk to me whatever is on your mind. Maybe i wont be here this instant but talk. Thats enough. Ill be here. I know more than i seem too.",-1.6487160940325474,0.2976022236286937,0.8922073538276081,100.72655696202534,98.49367088607596,4.22755877034358,14.366365280289333,6.025991092188313,-0.8652222061482822,825,18,206,9,35,278,134,237,0.11800000000000001,0.765,0.11699999999999999,-0.2746,0,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,1,2,0,2,17,9,2,0,7,0,19,6,2,0,4,37,34,11,0,3,11,1,2,0,1,1,3,1,0,1,11,8,1,0,8,1,2,6,8,4,1,2,1,5,32,5,29,28,12,24,0,2,2,0,12,7,0,6,10,136,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794243433898515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543751773853357,0.0,0.09706052972237236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585451134313374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942263443210775,0.10537820275062727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4867193306332563,0.10170705587343884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727695662344022,0.0,0.13714828087804085,0.0,0.08747539121629556,0.0,0.09330945611344477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499209971350837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17662365394395585,0.0,0.0,0.08021342514535483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801005539092085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250375998693688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44858680839642295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282337159572609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333328537930388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918801255537928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882666380458389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430420102691404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483167637315158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632188232130327,0.0,0.0,0.20054588295278086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23688630695978466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437083389958088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273352291361871,0.09451659863491048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038980223296356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337961154831005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652561348810825,0.0,0.0,0.06054005104533235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123752047003745,0.08240989862718356,0.0,0.0,0.09334938391654893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06685863544288999
mentalhealth,Thominiio,2020/02/14,"I'll just vent and introduce myself a bit Good evening, my name's Thom.
My main issues with mental health, recently, is that I just don't feel that anything is enough. I used to work 50 plus hours a week as a chef and eventually after a mental breakdown I reduced my hours. I feel much better in terms of reduced chances of burnout, but I still feel like there's a lot missing. Most people in my position would be proud of themselves, and in a way, I am.
I'm 28, I currently own a house, (second one that I've bought but I sold the first and moved on) a boyfriend that loves me, I was rising in my career, but I took a step down because I just couldn't cope with the stress.
I have GAD and OCD as well as a social anxiety disorder so I feel like I can't really connect too much with people, I have difficulty with physical interaction except with my boyfriend and people laugh about my ""quirks"" as they call them or become annoyed be aude they don't understand my disorders. I always feel alone, and I'm okay with that. The hardest thing for me is that I've had to fight for everything I've got in my life and I never really experienced love until I found my boyfriend who I've been with for almost 2 years now. I just don't want to live my life for the sake of living my life. I want it to mean something and do something worthwhile, but part of me thinks ""what's the point in trying? Nobody takes any notice"". People will say I'm being stupid... But am I really?",4.113127090301006,4.775930103678932,5.039831103678928,85.55707107023413,70.70568561872909,8.254247491638797,25.986789297658863,8.395991825355821,1.4877838127090297,1147,33,244,17,20,375,161,299,0.10800000000000001,0.775,0.11599999999999999,0.516,1,1,2,0,1,0,35.0,0,0,3,5,12,15,3,1,15,1,21,6,0,1,1,47,44,22,0,4,11,0,5,2,0,2,4,1,0,0,10,17,0,0,9,0,2,4,6,5,1,3,8,7,40,10,37,30,10,27,0,1,0,2,12,9,0,4,15,161,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583737429223987,0.10946721257197023,0.0,0.0,0.08794595869579469,0.0,0.0,0.0718756128284524,0.0,0.08085569767874416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697723909130738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443014272230739,0.11673083017381035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347784286062737,0.11539058334772055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792549404446568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422691924416829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921025975707284,0.0,0.06980995663636354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499104244456054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26721056513564795,0.15101577320680068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990334799564985,0.0,0.11588812590058348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865119697952174,0.08453322760766377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234788648276108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081747973158281,0.12195680135678615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031718086046527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239646070467496,0.10327359749783664,0.0,0.1866596545107291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985734469245113,0.19078610477002847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11513186086526138,0.0,0.0,0.2130295878194317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233610208879803,0.15539465055325835,0.0,0.08151780623469908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033343409450865,0.0,0.0,0.07162105796663605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445641115926145,0.0,0.2930999249730996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991508844072347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031310419327087,0.0,0.10436017333342004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405219106558738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774182521269804,0.0,0.16273696481152758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440744528777137,0.0,0.12107223515999417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946880987500722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021846398660785,0.06772451193817193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174300347819198,0.07175935637970472,0.0,0.0,0.11003128625069143,0.0,0.09128576741800992,0.0,0.0,0.12468223797375265,0.08389505741871725,0.08478143214950723,0.0,0.09503168981083364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769465640638495,0.0,0.0,0.07508205657033681,0.0,0.0,0.0680635354836868
mentalhealth,soohoori,2020/02/14,"dont know whats wrong when im at school i can function like a normal human being without any problems, but when i am alone everything goes downhill. i have episodes where i suddenly get violent and start hurting myself, for example cutting and punching myself and sometimes after that i break down and start sobbing for a good ten minutes or so. the scariest part though is that when i cry there is no feeling, only tears. if i try to, i can stop it and go straight from an ugly cry to a straight face. i dont know what the cause could be because i have a very comfortable and rather stress free life. i have been dealing with this for about six months now, it was very sudden.",4.889593698175787,5.775274111940298,4.922636815920399,86.28844941956885,69.07462686567165,7.448092868988391,31.30679933665009,7.3871296695380915,1.879123714759536,537,22,106,5,9,167,94,134,0.256,0.588,0.155,-0.9593,0,1,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,0,10,11,2,1,7,0,15,2,1,1,0,20,22,14,0,5,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,7,0,1,3,0,1,1,4,7,0,2,2,1,13,5,12,17,1,18,0,2,0,0,2,5,1,2,12,76,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766047921564134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100850145682972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868149878806948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16629695839534314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292492563055452,0.0,0.355638593016836,0.0,0.1668927841260606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794479743849981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14548871139819597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185218267555774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457643569258437,0.0,0.09200102329382746,0.13577857533236098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17329756220759618,0.0,0.17485986796578604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779317478384663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11434173594860116,0.07908715513984023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921231981892206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15860956185526712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311822396490815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753019583982531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15489879401458684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638327850528896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010500594115756,0.0,0.2291612081751957,0.0,0.0,0.13534023594897449,0.18543478444093628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590478145577188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990695566416528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26713848755793584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560480507871472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17699207746820408,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theoddman92,2020/02/14,"Strange thing happened today, I need some insight on it. So I don’t wanna get to into the weeds with this but I’ve struggled with stress and anxiety my whole life. Tried medicine for it, couldn’t make myself continue it so I have just learned over the last few years how to deal with it on my own.

My wife has had a bout of depression and anxiety, bad enough that we ended up in the ER with her having suicidal thoughts, she’s been on medicine for it but still has very down days. Today was one of those days.

On top of all this, I’ve been dealing with financial stress, doubting my capabilities as a dad, and hating being away from everything while I’m working 60 hours a week.

**WHERE IS THE ISSUE?!***
Well, Today has been an overall very BAD day. I got to work and have been extremely testy, and felt myself reaching my anxiety ramping up point and i started breathing exercises. After a few minutes of doing this I felt very very peaceful, almost serene for a minute, very calm. But for whatever reason my vision was very dark, almost like my eyes were kinda peeled shut. I felt this EXTREMELY DARK/ALMOST “EVIL” feeling take over my whole being for a couple seconds. It legitimately scared the shit out of me and I panicked, threw my headphones down and walked away for a minute.

I don’t know what the hell that was, I’ve had bad anxiety to the point of tears before but I legitimately felt terrified for a few seconds. 

Anyone have any idea about what I’m describing?",3.1004564423578493,5.444021007042255,3.843912363067293,86.23828116849245,76.60563380281691,6.742618675013041,24.95513823682838,7.793537801064563,1.403379394887846,1162,41,224,18,27,369,156,284,0.25,0.652,0.098,-0.9956,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,0,0,3,8,16,4,5,16,0,24,5,3,3,1,43,42,17,1,3,5,2,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,16,16,0,0,11,1,0,2,3,13,2,3,17,6,25,3,42,22,9,38,1,1,1,0,7,20,2,5,17,155,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26795659362227353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060657666244458286,0.0,0.2729447572414214,0.0,0.0,0.062369282154849236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676088246740862,0.0,0.2234296929330823,0.0,0.0,0.07590088760804918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869583757023756,0.0,0.17257590007746368,0.18391834416021186,0.0768260655525882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790029103208304,0.09216532876910363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016536794708799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04510116474603479,0.0,0.3425760889902103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04660224853041981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133975078627376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887745457615505,0.0,0.0,0.08806451111795502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784201538725958,0.0,0.0,0.1006936308555159,0.0,0.09309948777250272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04902086181758565,0.07270823615947819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300315155682963,0.043577613896938636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059540325746920274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613915135533505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060442840892140075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16864179236670954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171035079032076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930271089072599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156041615499412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631347696876762,0.0,0.07123359987250423,0.0,0.2043519058218964,0.09324906662247792,0.0,0.09756808232605467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670657592547763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05925915599306177,0.0,0.0,0.07081321056260527,0.0,0.0,0.2536476872134888,0.0,0.0,0.06055955445675454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4415859129296554,0.0,0.0,0.07154921694130235,0.0,0.08019967129811464,0.0,0.0,0.19917265644437354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987434313172752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057440556766327776
mentalhealth,AGirlHasNo_User_Name,2020/02/14,"I don’t think I’ve ever struggled this badly I feel so lonely. For the first time I’ve really tried to open up to people about how much I’m struggling with my mental health. Over the past few months, I’ve been very triggered by some things, and I have really struggled to pick myself up.

Some of my friends are amazing and supportive and try to check on me. But most have dropped off the face of the planet after I told them that I’m really struggling. 

I just don’t get out of bed most days. My work is lenient but I haven’t been in a week. I work from home when I can, but I know I’m not being productive. 

My therapist is in the hospital with her own health issues right now. I have two friends here who are supportive but they’re busy with their own lives, and anyways I know they can’t fix me.

I don’t understand why I’m struggling this badly NOW. I’ve been through so much worse, but for some reason I’ve just lost my will to live. I’d never ever take my own life, because my parents don’t deserve that. But wishing that I could is no way to get by. 

Just needed to vent for a second. I’m just tired of feeling pointless.",2.0631012658227874,3.6339752573839696,3.2711624472573853,92.71611075949369,77.01687763713079,6.258987341772152,22.39852320675105,6.961326702584282,0.4911723206751049,884,25,197,9,20,286,126,237,0.14400000000000002,0.777,0.079,-0.9482,1,2,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,3,4,15,14,0,5,7,0,21,5,1,4,3,41,41,14,0,3,11,1,2,0,2,1,4,0,2,0,7,9,0,0,7,0,1,0,9,9,0,3,5,2,27,5,31,33,11,25,0,2,0,0,9,10,0,5,13,134,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17867208603547566,0.0652229305390047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542650212821627,0.0,0.0,0.06900268192089681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19356552841506947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081993948344705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100957368381013,0.0,0.0,0.16532756430264695,0.0,0.11180055143388128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274605669539231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732433305735953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167459081275287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760289590732327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557346810774686,0.0,0.0,0.1889564288730463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679727270878512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782541697124774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540208918424033,0.0,0.15730672121666706,0.07933515898990016,0.08252085109687328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880486951617583,0.0,0.10213847661247906,0.07417660135373724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20563049030319205,0.11000829481285312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09137282545960623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5592700673167416,0.0,0.0,0.24283246585858656,0.0,0.0,0.08044664263486744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242290066677638,0.07108247484245386,0.06855783568522247,0.0,0.0,0.062389426482820726,0.1229745823207202,0.0,0.10223794969757748,0.0,0.1452846546328293,0.0,0.10451820206202604,0.1113851783811349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828177131614721,0.0,0.08492735343099432,0.0858246346576868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965460074494948,0.0,0.1230385388328578,0.0,0.0,0.1557867231423634,0.0,0.10903666406137852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amateuratart,2020/02/14,"I don't know what's wrong with me I have no idea if this is the right subreddit for this, but I've started to notice that my opinions about the people around me change constantly, and severely. So for example, I might be great friends with someone one second, but the next I absolutely hate them and never want to see them again, because I feel like they've wronged me in some way. A situation like this happened today actually: I had made plans with my friend and I was excited to finally spend time with her for the first time in a long while, but then she suddenly decided that she's gonna go home and play video games instead of spending time with me. This flipped some kind of switch inside me, since now I never want to see her face again and I feel so angry that I want to scream. The change can happen the other way around too, and this kind of change happened yesterday. In this situation I was dreading to go to a party that I knew one of my ex friends was attending. I got there, saw her and immediately my mood was ruined as I remembered the many times she had wronged me. I mostly ignored her, but I still felt the hate I have towards her. After the party was over, I was talking with another friend who I haven't seen in about a year, and my ex friend came up to us. And she greeted me. At that moment, all of the hate I had towards her disappeared and instead turned to the urge to reconcile with her.

This has been happening for a long time already. There's rarely any kind of in-between in my opinions, it's nearly always either love or hate. And the opinion changes immediately when I feel either wronged or respected by the person. So, what's wrong with me? I've tried to explain this to my therapist, but I can't really put this feeling into words. I feel like I couldn't explain it here either. But I hope someone replies and knows what's going on with me (and maybe someone else as well, who knows :) )",5.180106614447347,5.603581234986947,5.637927545691905,83.06496790687554,68.24281984334203,8.889860748476938,30.31864664926023,8.841846274778883,2.213024456048738,1515,55,311,24,24,487,181,383,0.149,0.67,0.18100000000000002,0.9322,0,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,1,0,2,2,19,32,4,1,18,0,21,2,1,1,3,72,59,30,0,6,12,2,6,3,5,2,0,1,1,1,22,26,0,1,16,3,2,7,7,13,1,4,17,11,55,18,52,38,7,52,0,1,4,1,29,16,0,11,30,221,77,0,0.0,0.0,0.07011086210361367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792833160903763,0.0,0.05978122672120554,0.0,0.0,0.04885741618993532,0.07533629035333213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791548699504926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379636116180136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217213316851239,0.0,0.0,0.304012128304294,0.0,0.0,0.07763948178670459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060017711595514965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816362640599592,0.1026529053800126,0.06898296453189114,0.07870325361010788,0.0,0.06111176123639639,0.0,0.0,0.2775383464205716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122494391337282,0.0,0.057461424265884575,0.07920993765696195,0.0,0.0,0.2541310185392769,0.0,0.0,0.2837303007282251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206691286615259,0.07135881072026844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110484519066233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22444815453674005,0.11845325394611117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530027367751994,0.0,0.0,0.12716204584908386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484338537921992,0.06798196664830948,0.0,0.07284007904287594,0.07217847991223703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762167413538781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108233858292086,0.0,0.07640852387260227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817965988707682,0.0,0.0,0.09736876526927456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049808636254092716,0.06273273544337886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222458984274728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0460260787873839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138696688397408,0.061355680143964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450315256522332,0.0,0.0,0.08116498576184022,0.0,0.059431355239577474,0.16151474574901467,0.0,0.0,0.1826234237415147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05085262770010245,0.0,0.05737592378929057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05774670621838841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341818433839786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094684976846617,0.0,0.06810115075347764,0.0,0.0,0.04877839092005992,0.07814729304345512,0.0,0.0,0.08642131251238472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712904459086796,0.11405525672157375,0.0,0.0,0.06459774932844503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3927589792805293,0.0,0.04626615829240671
mentalhealth,ClinPsyDave,2020/02/14,"[Academic] The Role of Psychopathic Traits, Rejection Sensitivity and Emotion Regulation in Predicting Sexual Coercion and Attitudes Towards Rape. Hi Everyone - apologies if this isn't allowed on here - I'm just very desperate for participants for my thesis. I'm a 3rd year clinical psychology trainee at Liverpool University so I thought I would see if anyone on here could possibly help.  


Basically I am after people aged 18-25 who are currently enrolled as students to complete an on-line questionnaire. They can opt in at the end for a chance to win one of 3 x £50 Amazon vouchers. I appreciate many of you will be over the age limit (or like me, way over), but maybe you have other family members that could complete it. Thank in advance.  


Please find study advert below:  


*Title:* ***The Role of Psychopathic Traits, Rejection Sensitivity and Emotion Regulation in Predicting Sexual Coercion and Attitudes Towards Rape.***  


*We are looking for current undergraduate student volunteers aged between 18 and 25 to take part in our research, investigating the psychology of sexual coerciveness (i.e. persuading others’ to partake in sexual activity) and attitudes towards rape.*  
*You will be asked to complete a series of online questionnaires and they will remain anonymous. The questionnaires will take approximately 15 minutes to complete. You will be asked about your attitudes towards rape, sexual coercion, callousness, antisocial personality traits, attitudes towards antisocial behaviour, ability to deal with rejection and manage your emotions.*  
*Eligible participants who complete the questionnaires will be invited to be entered into a draw for the chance to gain one of three £50 Amazon vouchers*  


*If you have any questions please contact me: David Boothroyd by email;*  


*david.boothroyd@liverpool.ac.uk*  


*You may access the on-line questionnaire here:*  


[**livpsych.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_6XOgjFSKbebrHX7**](https://livpsych.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_6XOgjFSKbebrHX7)",7.934015336354129,12.172973443708615,7.631990240501918,54.500209132101794,72.84105960264901,11.523318229348204,38.410944579993036,10.484789902882557,6.395058278145697,1628,92,189,63,38,515,173,302,0.073,0.825,0.102,0.4595,3,0,0,0,0,0,88.0,2,8,2,4,6,10,4,0,14,0,22,5,0,1,0,26,32,15,0,6,6,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,0,1,7,11,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,7,0,3,1,2,19,3,46,16,1,30,0,3,2,4,26,19,0,6,9,130,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015117711532632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241285380816626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22037280157811065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6178878427210927,0.0,0.0,0.188208723499653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151202552150155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3977414992154956,0.10439201917580583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262356251530965,0.0,0.0,0.11111115639461296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772504378419004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900137563749503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575821205458253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897560024873124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949502310485666,0.11840966179772087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15973462698598329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763461376956864,0.0,0.08171166503678208,0.1029138047313882,0.0,0.2587573145372641,0.0,0.1328733130026774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203402086511176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939218974028454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723726879764387,0.0,0.0,0.10851281496257978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357040145649873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09724967705433127,0.0,0.09355450815170273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372680214518864,0.0,0.0,0.07590018746231456
mentalhealth,ilikewhitesquirrels,2020/02/14,"I don’t quite know how to become better Hello all. I’m not sure if this is the right subreddit to speak about this, but I’m hoping I can get some advice.

People have told me that I am not going after what I want, that I’m afraid, that I’m not living my life. I think that a reason for this is because I’m becoming a... well. A “normie” for lack of a better world.

I know there are things about me I ought to change, and that I have hurt people in the past. But I don’t quite know how to make amends, or how to even feel properly sorry for what I’ve done. It feels like every day I decide not to change, I’m losing opportunities and that one day I just won’t even care that I have these qualities that hurt myself and other people.

I’m afraid that one day I won’t have a proper conscience, I guess. That I won’t even recognize that I’ve done something wrong. I’m generally pretty happy in day to day life, but this is a conversation that is always going in the back of my mind. So every decision I make feels very high stakes, and that if I make the wrong decision I will draw closer to becoming just an awful, uncompassionate and unintelligent person. I know I can be someone wonderful, and I believe in myself, but I am also very afraid of slipping down the wrong path.",3.6589395859738048,4.374561030418253,5.138751584283908,84.24426594845798,71.77566539923954,7.973722010984369,22.215673848753696,8.167268648758528,0.9360005914659908,993,20,213,14,18,335,121,263,0.141,0.7190000000000001,0.141,0.0049,0,0,1,0,0,2,28.0,0,0,0,6,15,18,0,3,12,1,23,2,0,7,2,48,51,18,0,6,13,0,3,1,0,5,2,1,0,1,23,6,0,0,13,0,0,2,9,9,1,2,3,4,28,9,22,42,3,19,0,3,0,0,5,9,0,7,9,143,51,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934924907892498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651125318688494,0.07960925422310974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356815996292422,0.0,0.05832258454710185,0.31699652170916204,0.0,0.10779294822329333,0.0,0.16923350354870662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754702647807867,0.0,0.2024229021090012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085122607225993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19581746035601472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895772813526999,0.0,0.16122060732010102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512844564853306,0.06835023040970356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049986232292305185,0.0,0.10874860080910834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539678556848793,0.0,0.0,0.10184780359510932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108587754477982,0.0,0.09502685065633697,0.0,0.0,0.2048441064999535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21032188473767244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515614667439418,0.04674196631466999,0.0,0.08448276708508391,0.0,0.0,0.10703583864760598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19159139187902174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660446381699253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296636956591991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133260171713832,0.1989869698333871,0.0835397090011793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733585838386433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20352425281032105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836982211751813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08170591683224891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106510669608953,0.07365527987471725,0.0,0.10710031582898126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017254374589667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356221062984943,0.06130466900328151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914215509159534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15788376968050533,0.056431586665012766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602330414716508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10375544306044414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138167395838499,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Luna320,2020/02/14,"DAE get really stressed and overwhelmed with messes? The house I live in gets messy almost everyday, I always stress out coming home when I remember how messy it is. I'm usually the only one who cleans so thats maybe the reason but I just spent two hours cleaning. There's still so much and it stresses and irritates me but I'm so tired I don't w want to deal with anymore.",1.7881578947368406,4.1399507105263185,3.020263157894739,90.32934210526315,81.36842105263158,6.43157894736842,21.34210526315789,7.645422480735847,0.8977421052631582,298,9,61,5,8,96,59,76,0.273,0.711,0.016,-0.96,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,4,3,0,2,1,0,2,0,15,9,10,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,4,7,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,5,0,2,1,0,6,0,5,8,1,8,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,5,36,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903079910390388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487663065014406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731009295072173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540104120974805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843230335168688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18681916384265312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17933938522301485,0.0,0.17607060155251125,0.20629785790767105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578734701752927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17961702116800246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314300768091786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115167563613705,0.1359766669437297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453645432663224,0.1838242959369259,0.0,0.0,0.202532452489622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278068103298314,0.0,0.6144046700404248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20549101367038666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17465032922590568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19691021023774927,0.0,0.10545405556296343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unwindstress,2020/02/14,"Relieve Stress You Never Knew You Had Our mission at unwind is to provide a refuge for those who are experiencing any amount of stress or mental health struggle.

unwindstress.wixsite.com/website

Facebook: @unwindyou",9.358125,13.942438562500005,5.967500000000001,66.5275,69.625,6.95,33.0,8.07648339933343,3.373225,182,8,21,3,4,50,30,32,0.21100000000000002,0.722,0.067,-0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,2,0,0,0,4,0,3,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,3,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,3,1,4,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201196562003564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.344066327565732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262024335238395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24964895291280376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7415694344737997,0.33839007922299064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dankx1,2020/02/14,What the hell?! I have an internship in a health center and someone had a heart attack and an ambulance had to be called. I stood there and tried my hardest not to fucking laugh. Whats wrong with me?,1.939,4.171886900000004,2.765000000000004,93.05,80.0,6.0,22.5,7.1686216300943375,0.6879999999999997,156,5,33,2,4,49,32,40,0.243,0.757,0.0,-0.8822,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,5,0,4,3,1,0,0,5,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,4,1,4,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39972888882674396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3587833777679098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32483166800232954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734850097676037,0.0,0.4163697132270819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977107792616051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238554055242538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3841629273660965,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ysabelschav,2020/02/14,"anyone willing to share their mental health story? hey everyone,

I am working on a project that aims to change the way people think about mental health and destigmatize it, along with going to therapy. I want to feature people who would be willing to share their mental health struggles and how your therapist has helped you through. Through this I really hope to empower more people and help others feel not alone in their own situation. If anyone is willing to be a part of this, please comment below with your email!",9.09032258064516,9.099423623655916,7.904860215053768,71.51729032258065,60.0752688172043,10.450752688172043,35.804301075268825,9.888512548439397,3.566963010752687,419,16,67,7,5,128,65,93,0.025,0.8079999999999999,0.16699999999999998,0.9004,1,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,3,1,2,4,0,1,3,0,9,3,0,1,0,14,14,5,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,9,3,17,8,3,5,0,0,0,0,14,3,0,2,0,53,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592799190797899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21506689817489288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626892848880412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695280609960912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776077638605923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874023241139085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4904143034425363,0.0,0.0,0.20616420891642528,0.0,0.0,0.15274803609047444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4649520351197161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653943659727746,0.0,0.3198555843923199,0.0,0.0,0.16881508904888864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852172524676696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17286625129955285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16077455778959124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17587211303518546,0.1785618860980299,0.0,0.0985423354425708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907092466709596,0.122071236152671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196085302254292,0.0,0.0,0.10924790733120077,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,product32,2020/02/14,"Pretty Sure I need to see a therapist at this point. No help for anxiety, depression, mental health. 50 year old male. Physically active. Gym. Avid golfer. Eat super healthy. No pre-existing conditions.  


Metal Health History:

Sexually abused by a social worker as a child. Didn't think it affected me, but now I'm less convinced of that.  
Chronic Social Binge drinker.  
Nasty divorce 3 years ago. Probably have PTSD based on what docs told me.  
Depressed for two years. Getting better now.  
Lack confidence and self esteem despite being successful and a 140 IQ.

The Physical Problem:

I have this ongoing sensation of low blood sugar, and ""electrified brain"", feeling like ""toxic"" all the time. I feel like I'm going to pass out at all times. Sometimes its worse than others, like around 8pm at night, it gets bad. I have been super bloated with air for 3 years, and I took a hydrogen/methane breath test, and the hydrogen was through the roof, so they told me SIBO. I was explained that the HPA Axis is whats making me sick.

The Testing:

I've had the whole battery of tests done. Blood, urine, stool, neurotransmitters, everything. I was told I have general anxiety disorder, and my response to that is ""of course I do, I'm sick and no one knows why"". I'm in constant fight or flight, and there seems to be some relation to carbohydrates/sugar. When I eat them, it makes me feel better for several hours. My blood sugar has been tested and studied like 4 different times over the last year, and its always perfect. My blood pressure and heart rate are that of a triathlete, perfect. Resting at 62bpm, and 100/65. I even got a home testing kit, and every time I test it, its dead on perfect for where it should be. I've had more panels that a lab rat. The only thing that I had on my tests was slightly elevated BUN/Creatine Ratio at 25.6:1, Bilirubin-Total at 1.7mg/dl, ALT 50U/L, BUN at 23mg/dl. I was told this was likely dehydration, and to drink more water. Cholesterol and lipids are beautiful, no issues there.

Some BackStory:

I got divorced 3 years ago, and it was incredibly traumatic. I was depressed for well over 2 years, and I had a script for .25 Klonopin, that I would take here and there, when I would feel a panic attack. I never took it for more than 10 days, and I stopped that permanently 3 weeks ago, because OMG the withdrawal from even that tiny amount was awful. I'll never take it again. I was also a fairly successful binge drinker during the divorce aftermath, but I've since also sworn off alcohol. Its been 2 weeks for that too.

I was tracking with MyFitnessPal for electrolytes, and for Arizona, I had low sodium and potassium intake, so I'm working on getting more electrolytes too.

I guess my question is in relation to the mind making the body sick. I believe I have PTSD from the betrayal of my wife. I was literally bedridden for months at a time. Maybe I need to see a CBT therapist or something. I was told I have HPA Axis issues with my gut and brain, and my hormones are not balanced, thus the crazy bloating and feedback loop to the brain.

I don't know what input you can provide, but I'm getting desperate. I'm nearly unable to go out and do normal things because my doctor told me to cut carbohydrates and I'm on some diet called SCD Diet. Pretty much it's Keto, but you can have fruit.

Thanks in advance. I know this was long.",3.6561464004839688,5.8862362507837,4.459275697079693,83.02772782269155,74.42319749216301,7.423901446405983,27.18044327118737,8.31658001898498,1.9994447230929988,2640,102,487,47,57,848,318,638,0.175,0.708,0.11699999999999999,-0.9927,1,0,6,0,5,0,116.0,0,2,2,12,20,30,3,2,29,1,49,29,12,5,8,78,94,39,1,8,7,1,4,5,0,3,8,0,1,3,33,32,10,1,11,2,0,6,9,12,1,2,34,9,52,18,62,54,15,68,0,5,2,0,24,28,0,8,39,299,85,13,0.0,0.0781318392245666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536384768781274,0.07047316335730809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054694123925763,0.05486997607668158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089264505358636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058703376429424727,0.0,0.07501984298058005,0.0,0.0,0.05505976845854405,0.080396653631777,0.0,0.0,0.07429533850010789,0.0,0.11664269916492895,0.0,0.0732479640606682,0.0,0.22084306286973396,0.0673353200545307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712611089114922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042527870736661005,0.0,0.17039019267488328,0.0,0.0,0.06889654727609289,0.07557655286568474,0.0674955992725035,0.0,0.0674827284213652,0.0,0.06459917356392847,0.0,0.13495259235001045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710964568141337,0.0,0.055559940568781684,0.0,0.05926544327592066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337133424988776,0.0942195865044899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13781027830536033,0.0,0.07495401361310834,0.0,0.1054815080829628,0.0,0.07264380453175119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018895091923328,0.0,0.07814293983066,0.04420029752732403,0.0,0.06614634730276317,0.0,0.0649407108517524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376550137021845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872187753087212,0.0537524613951245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16108243937791367,0.0,0.0,0.05835760485595814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13205267643178534,0.0,0.06624874870008057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645517634135749,0.0,0.06658377433964577,0.0,0.052635186174818216,0.0,0.048475796300059514,0.0977920072806084,0.10171883152455494,0.0,0.0,0.06188317090911834,0.06461027732539612,0.0,0.0,0.06919623386333193,0.0,0.044684779101781036,0.0501527303974378,0.0,0.07737006795947111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0623375831447292,0.0,0.0,0.13417576318345958,0.0710978594700413,0.06309868031653929,0.1541680064302697,0.0,0.0738714099453863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509629170473013,0.06003215910100166,0.06879307794054584,0.0744969795916989,0.0,0.05454884784161919,0.0,0.0,0.13444145608390382,0.0,0.050766251789277884,0.06521945281257244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05513141878499806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062150630179808784,0.0,0.09916207092054834,0.0,0.0,0.06071158468026856,0.0,0.1531301390101619,0.08761938572785684,0.042253702216223835,0.0,0.0,0.19225987968391492,0.0,0.0,0.3780689841102903,0.14653051248109092,0.0,0.0,0.06441686704319173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579122048987813,0.0,0.059290803395340125,0.0,0.05950342813718075,0.07362316218899882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048007392175578784,0.0,0.06720169456710255,0.0936882310204307,0.0,0.0,0.2972565463322409
mentalhealth,llamaspitty,2020/02/14,"I will probably kms tonight (i’m on mobile) i have no reason to live and haven’t for a long time, i know that i’m not liked and i’m an annoyance to those around me. i don’t know what it is but i have friends but no real ones i don’t have people to be with, i am a disappointment to everyone that has ever had any belief in me. i have too many reason to list on why if i was gone that i feel like things would be better, people wouldn’t worry about me, i wouldn’t be a problem to those around me, the water and electric bill would go down. i am a waste of space and worthless. i wish i did this a long time ago and i wouldn’t have ruined so many things for friends, idk what else to call them besides friends because people is too general. i hate myself more than anything else in the world, i feel like even posting this is dumb because it sounds like i’m a pussy and can’t just man up for once in my life. if some back ground for me is that i’m a captain on varsity football, i run track, play paintball competitively, and i’m a 16 yr in high school. i don’t need validation or anything, idk what i need exactly but it’s might stop me later or not idk, and yeah ik things get better but i’ve been depressed since i was 7 and just have always hated myself because of how i was raised and what i was told while young and it’s all i believe now and nothing has helped, i had a wonderful girlfriend who really cared about me and i ended it with her because i thought i wasn’t treating her right and that she needed someone better than whatever i am. i ruin anything and everything that comes into my life and if i end it all then it would stop and i’ll stop hurting everyone i meet. i don’t need help by services or anything so please don’t recommend any professional services",2.5692772413793112,3.7998383360000036,3.9592367816091962,89.70840000000004,74.97333333333333,6.879080459770115,24.931034482758626,7.372421405659032,0.9658689655172412,1396,45,310,16,29,461,176,375,0.185,0.667,0.149,-0.8892,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,3,15,24,4,0,12,1,42,3,0,3,4,70,67,32,0,15,14,0,2,4,4,8,2,1,0,1,25,23,1,3,9,1,1,4,15,11,0,1,12,3,48,13,32,44,4,40,1,6,0,0,16,17,1,9,22,208,73,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729233533633857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255250121505777,0.0,0.0,0.11858999695727165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870133585868201,0.1552425240270457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06704690387050742,0.0,0.21261092959670366,0.0,0.0,0.09823792576962613,0.0,0.23134836693926256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890349557150399,0.0,0.08890022681586199,0.0,0.0,0.07511002238081241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510017648389954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567901437572825,0.0,0.15445623735019368,0.0,0.0,0.0575909005802342,0.07887208262896518,0.0,0.1666354558560033,0.07836446181930279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817594413287072,0.12458300792396962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020979058507107,0.0,0.045555334169565184,0.0,0.04955443352243015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17217230322434354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688877485842107,0.09212538573516528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933431196584494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583922715327724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317558544556688,0.17039459047487673,0.0,0.07699401434428564,0.15432812258939946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17680232451264058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249919285653416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586133705301361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836651194647191,0.0,0.0,0.0928589028424758,0.05908499915410618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813482931287977,0.0,0.0,0.09571297093832147,0.0,0.0,0.08350787394712343,0.0,0.09401001976708248,0.08343300667630116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924600927239308,0.055858792472077166,0.17930017579876942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744633106803847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824511472844347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212788545375337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387930347373475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21869459116201265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17378371681624966,0.0,0.0,0.06922239961648062,0.10168719690987482,0.0,0.0,0.08331772792800166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867914023125631,0.0,0.1002689464475618,0.0,0.09455831463531678,0.0,0.08854987161513482,0.0,0.18582062489275733,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Aedric,2020/02/14,"Mom is convinced she is dying but nothing is physically wrong with her. I need advice on how to help her. My mom took care of my grandma (her mother) as a full time care giver for 5 years after my grandma suffered a stroke and had the mind of a 1 year old. My mom did not want my grandma to go into a nursing home because my mom is a former social worker and knew the conditions. When money ran out, my grandma was finally put in a nursing home. Very shortly after my grandma was put in the nursing home, she suffered another stroke and was in a vegetative state. Within a couple of days, we decided as a family to pull the plug and she passed away immediately with us present.

My mom help set up the funeral and was grieving but as strong as she ever was until a couple of days after the funeral when she suffered a panic attack and thought something was medically wrong with her. Immediately I could tell it was not like her and thought she was lying. I can see now that she is not lying but that she is having a serious psychological problem. In the 7 months since that initial incident, she has become progressively worse. She is convinced she is dying, can't talk about anything but her symptoms, and telling us that it isn't psychological but real pain. The pains she complains about are always changing and debunked when she goes to the hospital. She refuses to take medication like Prozac for depression with psychotic features and even tries being deceptive by making it seem like she takes them.

I need help with any ideas on what can be done to help her recognize that she is having a psychological problem and recover.",8.700776699029127,7.519186132686088,8.941087378640777,67.65027184466021,61.459546925566336,11.605695792880262,38.72297734627832,10.650279960617883,4.1457924919093845,1301,56,227,26,15,432,155,309,0.214,0.6729999999999999,0.113,-0.9905,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,3,0,1,3,9,24,1,1,22,0,31,9,0,2,1,45,47,25,5,6,8,6,2,3,0,0,8,0,3,0,9,19,1,1,6,0,1,7,5,15,0,0,16,3,40,9,39,28,1,41,0,5,1,0,44,13,0,1,22,168,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293904434543811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062294961422684,0.0,0.0,0.057718033421337786,0.08899902744650212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984504194419205,0.0,0.0,0.09655777111111752,0.07974302625872848,0.0,0.0,0.05173912241782792,0.09373796886230402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730718068698897,0.0,0.08978668721317874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776592549295879,0.18782554635281026,0.0,0.10947494010342584,0.0,0.07310286883315904,0.0,0.1761740751642432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685677796673927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05605925642535532,0.07677446020728629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001276673753875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297661187355236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04823652118405262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275601783272966,0.0,0.2554101798513512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581374805308288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439717834786215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665484223425836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17100563061894558,0.0,0.0,0.08569973738902788,0.4970239295974777,0.06774655953858487,0.0,0.0,0.12586774219111693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144002505042268,0.0,0.0890622246817625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18062635298073934,0.0995827372608086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242817071731674,0.0,0.17064599872331562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660653726439174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763453025141287,0.07726717688920294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020962661345091,0.0,0.0,0.08651955821711965,0.0,0.06534106078717564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882178109520888,0.12763114619327182,0.06821945529267925,0.14836929804570909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476282577218635,0.04949140045834555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429944880454166,0.05762467639340845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20418878413522187,0.0,0.0,0.07003091298783785,0.05006158066152517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649506029983624,0.0,0.18559537249793406,0.0,0.1093136673546866
mentalhealth,Lungtied,2020/02/14,"A 23 year old trying to succeed. I just want some opinions. I am going to post this somewhere, this is not a cry for help this is something I need answers for.

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What the fuck do I do? I am a 23 year old living at his parents house I have been living and breathing computers my whole fucking life  building them / video editing / game developing / etc. and now I go to the doctors and I have high blood sugar after literally 3 months of trying to better my health by working out and intermittent fasting, I am one step away from actually killing myself if I go back in 3 months and they tell me I have ANY type of diabetes but that isn't the point. 

​

I have worked MANY jobs mostly all labor, I worked at UPS which had no actual opprotunity for me further than just breaking my back unloading trucks (the list for ""truck drivers"" was ridiculousy full), I worked at a landscaping company that didn't keep people for more than a year and that was a fact I don't know the reasoning but the longest ""worker"" that had been there had only been there 7 months and said the rest of the people that he got hired with got fired, the rest were people that had worked 20 years + and were supervisors for that company. I am currently just fucking lost with what I need to do, I have worked and worked but it feels like no job is actually going to give me a career opprotunity or something to rely on for a long-term. I WANT TO MOVE OUT I WANT A NEW CAR I WANT ALL THIS SHIT but what the fuck do you do?? just work and get fired over and over again until you die?? 

​

I ran a drop shipping business with the money I made from UPS and it made over $1200+ sales in the next week but then I couldn't find another niche when that was working so I just closed the fucker and I'm just slowly spiriling into insanity. I want to move out I want to have a girlfriend and not rely on her for ANYTHING and her the same to me I just don't know what the fuck to do. It seems like any job I could possibly get right now is a job that ANYONE can fucking work I'm pass trying to go to college I want to get the fuck out of my parents house, they destroy my mental health on the daily with so many things in their little agenda of ""failures of my son"" but they can't help me move forward and I'm constantly reminded of everything shitty I've ever done in my life like smoking fucking pot LOOOL I'm so sick of feeling like I'm going no where and that there's just too many people in the world that these companies don't want to give some fucking ""uneducated retard"" like myself any opprotunities to be on the high end level of income. All my friends it seems have gotten jobs because of their families and now they're sitting pretty and stress free but I don't have that luxury. 

​

I am almost done with my life at 23 if I had a gun permit I would've ended it a fucking hour ago with the last conversation me and my dad had but instead I've just been searching for suicide methods that are painless and it came to me that I just want maybe some different answers on what the fuck I should actually do with my life that I haven't found on google yet and If I never reach out I won't find it so here I am.",4.574825154489275,5.0314356519083985,5.444814612868047,83.80277989821883,69.58015267175573,8.192293711377681,27.80897855325336,8.11559375814309,1.6160352599054884,2532,80,530,32,42,830,271,655,0.165,0.755,0.081,-0.9973,10,0,3,1,0,2,57.0,0,2,6,14,30,26,15,1,35,0,57,25,3,4,6,104,112,41,3,17,24,4,4,5,2,2,9,1,0,0,34,37,1,1,12,2,3,15,16,17,0,1,28,6,71,10,78,79,14,90,0,1,0,12,26,39,13,12,39,361,105,25,0.0,0.0,0.17902969982871506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04065637445550161,0.0,0.04592696817907963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987779498264154,0.22292298985340564,0.09356890244015294,0.04809323777902455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032069731871375365,0.0,0.03774281929009991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04309148575118228,0.07053439433495316,0.0,0.027958754025872827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04056368502354105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05245710826413346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04956355086102375,0.0,0.0366193076661156,0.0,0.05038032491591695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0476004172768446,0.04791895014304026,0.0,0.046944562308074166,0.0,0.09387122073857017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124519197629904,0.0,0.05115137150847828,0.0,0.04148733391861795,0.0,0.0,0.04122032139235345,0.0,0.0432372479393573,0.0,0.04638123802358389,0.06553163905462056,0.0,0.0,0.08383918552396541,0.0,0.0,0.05028838164364322,0.035435027725947664,0.4664139147450663,0.07188738895197755,0.08799538340780337,0.15639612360924332,0.0,0.07336453460555528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750426712653136,0.0,0.0,0.06148441212973073,0.096917350549906,0.0,0.0,0.04516758543919869,0.10584363364248983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275686655787243,0.040766738170159134,0.050742601495065265,0.0,0.05041218498204195,0.03738593034766572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12958264759005614,0.11203611337063343,0.045968574847502906,0.0809989105489441,0.04058890130377064,0.0,0.0,0.05006684292734853,0.0,0.0,0.08679675814587691,0.0,0.13949911356753045,0.04607735237117668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04622092699489263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982652811206847,0.14624105956412653,0.0,0.06801633037557715,0.03537375825889049,0.04429650591455871,0.048777731020662095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625477652154404,0.0,0.031079172855357683,0.0348822442120564,0.0,0.0,0.10185485676367356,0.0,0.0,0.1271874989109321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04335705716542413,0.05170566633666258,0.04392579650237165,0.04666098636719082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715664920390125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03916828530337799,0.043627924062672914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350717569088302,0.0,0.0,0.04707955414384878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061792164100421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253796901848122,0.0,0.0,0.05016864282055186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04008785339990642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0304705325756862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341755780623837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24347020571839464,0.0,0.03678997294240993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05120640696506715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33390117837693184,0.0,0.0,0.032581035253238966,0.0,0.22292298985340564,0.11814169991343558
mentalhealth,afalkens,2020/02/14,"How to deal with strangers yelling when you have PTSD So, I won’t go into detail, but let’s just say that people yelling at me or being confrontational with me, is very triggering of past abuse I’ve suffered.

And, I always struggle with how to stand up for myself because I don’t want to get all worked up and stressed, but I also don’t want to feel like I just took it like a doormat. 

Today I had a particularly bad encounter with a woman on the subway. I live in NY, and the hallways leading down to the subway are rather narrow, just wide enough for the width of like 2 and half people, maybe three people. 

This woman was standing right in the middle of the pathway, talking to someone, so they were blocking like 2/3s of the space. And, she was facing my direction, so she could easily see and hear me coming. 

As I got close to her, I expected her to move over a bit so I could get by, but she didn’t, probably wrapped up in her conversation. So like any New Yorker, I just scooted by her the best I could as I was walking, and brushed by her a bit. 

I didn’t body slam her, or stick my elbow out to smack her like some people do to be dicks when people are in their way. 

I only made light contact with her, which was inevitable because she was being inconsiderate about where she was standing. And then as I’m already several feet from her heading down the staircase, I hear her yelling really aggressively at me something along the lines of “of don’t fucking bump me, say fucking excuse me fucking bitch”. 

Which besides the superfluous use of the f word, really pissed me off, because I felt like it was unfair verbal abuse that I didn’t deserve. 

I just kept walking because I had somewhere to be, and I didn’t feel like dealing with getting into it. But these kinds of interactions always make me feel really angry and triggered. 

This city is crazy which I’ve accepted, but I feel like I’m always getting screamed at by strangers for stupid things, and I never know how to deal with it. Do I need to start acting as crazy and angry as they are back for them to back down? Because I don’t know if I want to be that person, or if I even could be.",7.308537098560354,5.849743579069767,7.324086378737544,79.02282945736438,64.37209302325581,9.7718715393134,33.964562569213726,8.269060116576782,2.462270210409744,1689,58,342,17,21,544,199,430,0.177,0.7240000000000001,0.099,-0.9932,0,0,1,0,5,0,45.0,0,1,4,3,22,25,8,2,17,0,38,10,7,9,2,73,70,39,0,12,16,0,5,9,0,1,0,8,0,3,14,25,0,2,8,0,0,8,10,13,0,2,19,16,58,12,65,39,6,49,0,1,1,4,35,27,6,6,19,243,72,2,0.0,0.1920678626667926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894434237622555,0.06481763649752681,0.20232646129068646,0.0,0.0,0.05511846370330758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464870333835065,0.06767543265150686,0.247044188097178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505957397142445,0.0,0.17697662474571954,0.09003102986857034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981953197693505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588552300344901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506846340604115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837488753357266,0.0,0.053534396571679695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393027071056018,0.1737117170880864,0.0778230885545859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22479512650955846,0.1693862954611206,0.0,0.046063990480211474,0.0,0.06482507006565688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831832249447495,0.0,0.18270406437319944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440368200543635,0.08908864320325884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288164910874994,0.0,0.35638331487359937,0.0,0.07157082205738656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669381341447629,0.05410315771692847,0.0,0.08142810724448625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614595579630882,0.0,0.060099384612899674,0.06251266691589008,0.07828098726486342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061644061050792384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737376048481229,0.2809579101368861,0.07077189649372763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738827886379222,0.0,0.09474600809522443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15577287651801336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921837241371535,0.0,0.12891236568624062,0.0,0.0,0.06458833019377591,0.0,0.0,0.0915662282324101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06867550065643209,0.0623981565872637,0.0,0.0,0.05736936032821389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284533844701752,0.08473364724063924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514691072303347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0538476641275434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682827088863299,0.0,0.09005228414891774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07000331628569287,0.0,0.06687678194875278,0.14342055262761538,0.06433568348498264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059007168517227926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Interlection,2020/02/14,"What kind of professional to go to? I am looking for help in which kind of professional to go to. 

First, I have diagnosed add from when I was younger and have a hard time focusing and prioritizing things. This hasn't been much of a problem, but I now have a job with almost zero direct supervision or guidance. I have basically been told to make sure the thing I work with safe, and passes inspections and doesn't get complained about. Not a problem right, wrong. I know there are more things I could and need to be doing but can't focus on them unless something is to the non-functional point of broken or unsafe. And I still get distracted during that to make it take 2-3 times longer to fix something than it should.

Secondly I work a very inconsistent schedule, which has led to sleep problems and some depression symptoms. I will work days all week, but get woken up at midnight on a random night to work for a few hours, and have to go in very early one day a week. 

Third, I have anger issues in that I am easily frustrated with my family or things not being as easy as I think they should be.

I kinda want to see a mental health professional that can help me with these issues, but don't know what type to see, counselor, therapist, psychologist, psychiatrist. I don't want to go overboard and see someone who is over qualified for my problems or someone who is not trained to deal with them. 

Please help, discussion welcome, I will try to answer any questions.",8.066003039513674,6.979496684397166,7.8735157041540065,74.49000000000002,62.65248226950354,11.177710233029382,34.32725430597771,10.290406445055957,3.256325430597772,1163,40,223,22,14,373,159,282,0.13,0.7559999999999999,0.114,-0.828,1,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,3,5,5,15,2,1,11,0,31,4,1,3,2,52,53,21,0,10,12,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,17,15,0,1,5,0,0,6,8,10,0,5,5,5,23,5,43,40,5,30,0,1,4,0,14,10,0,9,14,159,40,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09944877370896386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06753702652933216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929426621993571,0.0,0.0,0.12809881930815709,0.10238852611572312,0.0855391304778956,0.1008017700647782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936245403648954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447656388196283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15566263047317813,0.0,0.2257700768914761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896596966655483,0.0,0.0,0.10556629559472806,0.0,0.0,0.1997045406309944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978044308478709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20731633657709986,0.0985539678480164,0.0,0.0,0.206840805340966,0.10916091732650454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339887173630714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13258593046850728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008530263548808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730073262956392,0.07364018262276734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931996005347779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729783721630754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109017111448138,0.09388397139384788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3801209093444562,0.0,0.0,0.11125457530225501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481374007784181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23742155405107274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993858718756216,0.0,0.16829711128070846,0.15291376695474054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931240718989375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093602409518569,0.10322542688067797,0.07467187978755185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531138091276448,0.2639196288416314,0.06363649615581128,0.0,0.0,0.11582175717350048,0.0,0.0,0.09489892479657563,0.0,0.06742778760176966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638891468739627,0.1171561157171305,0.0,0.15932763859536564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892075314014714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858443066322801,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lucieeward,2020/02/14,"HELP Worried about Brothers mental health Any advice is appreciated at this point. 
My family is at a loss with my brother (14)
His behavior is getting more and more worrying. 
Background: he had a troubled primary school life and had to go to a special school who were trained in violence prevention and able to restrain, he often hit teachers. 
He went to the doctors at that time and tested for all sorts of mental issues. The only thing they came up with was pathological demand avoidance. Which is a fight or flight response to overwhelming situations.
Once in secondary school he improved massively, no longer turned to violence and was behaving fine at school. 
However things have taken a turn for the worst in the last few months. 
He started skipping school, it was just a day or so here and there.. no explanation as to why.. 
Now he is skipping 2-4 days a week. He won’t tell us why. The school haven’t found any bullying issues.. he hasn’t mentioned anything to us.. we started taking his tech (PC, XBOX, phone) off him when he skipped school for a couple of day’s at a time to try and incentivize him to attend.. didn’t work. He got angry at us for doing so. We hid the wires in bedrooms but he would go in and find it then barricade himself in his room. 
A couple of weeks ago it happened, so we took his tech.. he found it,.. we took it back and put locks on our doors. He got angry at us for putting locks on our doors. He skipped 4 days that week. He still would not talk to us.. not tell us why.. 
this week.. he skipped school Wednesday.. I go in home and he is on headset happily chatting away on Xbox like nothing is amiss. I ask him calmly to give me his tech.. He hands it over seeming to understand why it needed to be done. No fuss made, nothing. 
I thanked him for changing the bins and feeding the cats to try and make it less negative.. he didn’t say anything. 
He skipped school again Thursday and again today (Friday)
I come home Thursday and the cleaners have left my bedroom door unlocked, my drawers all lay half open.. he’s been in them. 
I change the lock code.
I come home today and the lock is broken on my door. It was a strong lock. He’s been in but he’s put the tech back after. 
My mum went in his room. He’s curled up in bed with his teddywolf. Not doing anything.. just lying there. She asked what he took. He says he never got in. 

He has spent this entire evening almost laid in his bed doing nothing. He has spent many evenings doing the same. We are worried. We have tried so many times to talk to him. Asked if it’s us, is there something going on at a school? What is he feeling? What is he thinking?
Nothing
He won’t speak to us. He won’t go to the doctors for help. He won’t talk to anyone. We wouldn’t know if he was having dark thoughts because he would not tell us.

We don’t know what to do. He needs help but we can’t get it to him. What can we do?

People say not to punish him but if we leave his tech.. he has more reason to not go to school. 
He broke into my room.. 
he goes through my things when I’m not there
I don’t feel anything is safe anymore 

My mum is terrified that he will go as far as to take his own life and so am I. 
He didn’t have a troubled childhood.. he was raised with love and never wanted for much. My mum raised him as a single mother. There was no conflict that he witnessed, no abuse. He was a baby when my parents divorced.

Please ask any questions",1.1644736842105274,3.4797360217391318,2.3160068649885592,94.62856407322657,83.71014492753622,4.964912280701754,21.977498093058735,6.271793719691671,0.2691159420289857,2645,89,568,23,76,840,287,690,0.11,0.821,0.069,-0.9759,2,1,1,0,3,0,105.0,22,0,2,3,26,17,2,2,29,0,62,9,1,3,4,90,116,39,0,10,18,7,3,1,0,9,6,4,14,0,28,37,1,5,13,3,2,19,28,9,0,1,33,7,64,8,81,72,12,94,0,3,0,1,122,40,0,10,36,344,92,16,0.04413653597195517,0.052294577866995054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04312971213472349,0.03912437609294423,0.0,0.044196365266501086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004307390171551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043771583843176164,0.03086129217716763,0.0,0.14528243371332655,0.0,0.16504681255751275,0.0,0.04146772843157105,0.0678765435533151,0.0,0.026905222667987918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050480439044572174,0.0,0.0,0.0933812055250153,0.07603943524772193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767247512527484,0.0,0.11385765750956725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035122958491977,0.0,0.04516700017729473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058303531495783635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04160799806325037,0.0,0.044633517483886345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04033999427759941,0.0,0.0,0.09678686714600387,0.0,0.0,0.04611903675400714,0.042339787069034254,0.1755866736381292,0.0,0.10590005929819768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03902979299685149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046915073820719085,0.0,0.0,0.08875136911125814,0.0,0.13281763275914368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213415304535333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04851257180010519,0.03597716764212748,0.0,0.04673421878160005,0.04795447547529063,0.0,0.06234988125886321,0.021562882053351648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03983494692010407,0.041763057513458136,0.029461480487098686,0.08949503994462955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889584944713628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0352293619256994,0.0,0.032445432354304284,0.06545336434237628,0.0680816349454123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694007865361953,0.0,0.0,0.047003970349426535,0.0,0.03356782447515422,0.0,0.0,0.04900839998997596,0.0,0.0,0.030598716734805118,0.0,0.0,0.0484486625442067,0.041723292682675266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331082277345497,0.0494430214093702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045379709908855634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052974347472114,0.0,0.4913538381489669,0.0,0.040180244696506204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04961131568084319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033978461707261765,0.0,0.0,0.06248013466090763,0.0,0.035247494640691164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663703643824707,0.10642582725596823,0.11573183350817805,0.04063499239235501,0.0,0.0,0.08796705994147999,0.028280910095616608,0.0,0.03503947946282303,0.07720910718560163,0.0,0.08367255070344144,0.0,0.14711194637583305,0.08989743217993817,0.09601575402426353,0.0,0.04594769050534785,0.4778173654733057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026032872454474814,0.0,0.1416146675275725,0.0,0.0,0.08183002206206902,0.15930543486269527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03213192385118975,0.13446838415388124,0.0,0.09405998644618707,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MentalHealthLover,2020/02/14,"Has your mental health been damaged in any way due to brain trauma, minor or major... What is your story? I watched this video earlier on brain trauma and it made me think about mental health! I was always an advocate of mental health, but I never really took the time to be enlightened about the risk of athletics. I loved sports and have had several concussions 3 of them KOs while playing them. I'm hoping to learn more about the brain and how to bring awareness to the dangers of head trauma. Before its too late. LOL. The reason being I'm 24 now and I am mentally healthy IMO although I have Generalized Anxiety and Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD). But over time I have developed a few long term symptoms of what I assume are from the concussions. Such as Sensory, Mood, and Blood Dysregulation symptoms (Change in taste or smell and ringing ears now and then, feeling overwhelmed, depression, low energy/motivation, and some other stuff.) No cognitive thankfully and I doubt it. Most likely when I'm 70 and developed some sort of illness. Hopefully not! For now, I am headed to get my masters and I am a healthy dude. So I'm curious what is your story or any you have? 

Attached is the link to a video on facts about the NFL and head trauma it's pretty cool IMO it's the video I mentioned at the beginning of the post.

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TNCnvwzit-I](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TNCnvwzit-I)",5.191198539176625,8.075432733067737,5.272016932270919,75.89230162682605,72.26693227091633,8.486122177954847,27.191401062417,9.188382445141503,2.6761432934926965,1140,42,188,27,24,357,150,251,0.149,0.682,0.16899999999999998,0.8415,0,0,0,0,0,0,56.0,0,4,2,1,12,19,1,3,15,2,17,16,8,3,2,38,32,25,0,2,6,0,1,1,0,0,6,2,0,0,11,13,1,0,7,5,0,2,3,11,0,0,5,7,20,7,27,25,7,25,0,4,1,1,8,7,0,11,15,127,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942003331611827,0.0,0.0,0.15397425362146056,0.0,0.08660584036230162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633392811022833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37914159229068695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197618606291758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975081703148602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974921748046445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05724270821137701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059147894065317425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.348560376527474,0.3610128933805194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22488744753210735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770654870817466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05530900700452128,0.0,0.0,0.10018786616996783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217703518376883,0.10712265803925984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4563588468048496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731503550309899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842451212100243,0.1151759349810368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725256438128002,0.11639940741696493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789581477550874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959911330384236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23533843397452595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422915978006254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254081577325905,0.0,0.0,0.13202808541008573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578120204305726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898613475436207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pinkyelloworange,2020/02/14,"I'm afraid that this could get serious again (OCD) So I had pretty bad OCD last year. Like it was constantly affecting my life, getting me petrified very frequently because of stupid stuff like a certain room, or stairs, or buying bananas or a million other things. I went to therapy and I'm mostly ok now, it is not the same themes at least. But recently, I have noticed a new set of 'themes' emerge. They aren't as bad as the old ones were but I have a suspicion that they are connected to the same personality trait. I almost can't read the news or certain books too much because I know that I'll get a lot of thoughts and doubts and I'll waste hours and it feels pretty bad too. It can ruin a day sometimes, but it is not as major as the 'old' one was. They aren't as related to a particular stimulus, they just hit me at a certain point and poof... there goes my capacity to get stuff done or to enjoy the world around me. I don't know if it is the same thing but either way, it is annoying and I really want it to stop. I have tried engaging with them, telling myself 'No, that's not true and if it is it does not matter.' but that just makes me question 'Am I sure? I don't really know. Maybe I should be doubting this.' and there it goes... a cycle has started. A lot of the stuff is relational, but not really, it can get super random. What should I do to stop it?",1.2765653495440716,3.3213184042553223,3.192467071935159,90.11250000000004,81.2695035460993,6.865450861195543,21.418946301925022,7.957251820313856,0.9396520770010128,1058,32,234,20,28,355,144,282,0.152,0.728,0.12,-0.8938,0,0,0,0,1,0,36.0,0,0,5,1,10,21,2,3,18,1,29,1,0,2,5,62,46,27,0,6,21,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,1,1,27,10,0,2,6,2,1,1,11,10,0,3,7,1,25,11,20,34,10,25,0,1,0,0,8,7,0,15,17,167,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384074511669327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012052100406384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847707800079504,0.1386046376250693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285486685398575,0.0,0.09076952900772953,0.0,0.0,0.07331847590844061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994879423009012,0.1163409009737356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057483379650179516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969828783703044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11195843717509957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18743760786490604,0.0926697828400906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030023394057564,0.11108309676667036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933046268844599,0.0,0.0,0.07588671309661649,0.0,0.11421350755150815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357275926594948,0.0,0.0,0.10979926259701192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129432989918513,0.23859000310072195,0.0,0.15407401514807886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926678647155028,0.0,0.0,0.10747061888634037,0.0,0.0,0.2313203621544748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273550520302532,0.0,0.11371740238024962,0.0,0.21849171263544231,0.0,0.11225183893904377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243899111267157,0.0,0.08046798692493654,0.0,0.0,0.19009423843557294,0.0,0.0,0.3904320007814071,0.0,0.0,0.107148310098783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936713182066544,0.0,0.1300105774830368,0.0,0.15105670023734216,0.0,0.0,0.0902544909857615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718576404591412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938033818861932,0.06705532411715162,0.0902391609015456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053886516265422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321046696929934
mentalhealth,Johndope2402,2020/02/14,"Is mental-health care is due for a digital disruption? If we had more digital platforms to reach out to more people via phone, video conferencing, and even text, would this help lower the cost of mental health? Also, provide more counseling services to people who need it? I say from someone who works on a college campus and sees a severe lack of funding , this is alarming. I just wanted to know what people's thoughts were on this?",6.881875000000001,7.706848437500002,6.580000000000003,76.385,64.625,8.9,32.25,8.841846274778883,2.7464500000000003,345,13,58,5,5,108,59,80,0.14300000000000002,0.769,0.08800000000000001,-0.5625,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,4,0,6,1,0,0,0,12,12,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,7,4,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,3,1,11,8,4,5,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,1,1,41,10,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17207493338089713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193846968068906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212069772105626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4574407658663106,0.0,0.0,0.1442269010491892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182542527972322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4336904807695604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15954913141413635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44752462090917616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17111536254704462,0.0,0.0,0.17146618136410216,0.0,0.0,0.24308588641045545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18231661687951567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082448151186724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691546813697854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664956546178274,0.0,0.0,0.1528537586936386,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stop-calling-me-loli,2020/02/14,Tw: how can I stop pulling my hair and picking my skin? My mom c got back with her ex that abused me and my brother and I'm having to relive trauma and I've been hospitalized 2 for self harm and anxiety. I live with my other mom T. (My parents are divorced lesbians with other women) but my self harm has gotten increasingly worse I just don't know what to do anymore.,1.9709398496240595,3.910325342105264,3.704812030075189,87.83868421052631,78.47368421052632,5.9218045112781965,24.01503759398497,6.868970318607317,0.8291300751879702,290,10,60,3,7,97,54,76,0.22899999999999998,0.7709999999999999,0.0,-0.9446,1,0,0,0,2,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,7,3,2,2,0,14,11,7,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,8,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,3,2,12,0,6,8,1,4,0,0,0,1,10,0,0,0,2,38,16,0,0.0,0.278529439267361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983431678989878,0.0,0.2331345849027061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18076076322286808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880136548109412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291929294779612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20757851583043124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5506419135325172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610267206538389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4904760367712279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19653605127692092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23956495189871635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QuitePunderful,2020/02/14,Advice for Getting Help I have issues that aren't very common at all and I'm very embarrassed of them (paraphilias and urges) I was wondering what do I do to seek out treatment as I'm 16 and live in Britain.,2.018255813953488,4.0091098372093015,3.4211046511627927,89.68188953488372,78.53488372093022,7.090697674418602,24.703488372093023,8.07648339933343,1.4205395348837215,165,6,35,3,4,54,34,43,0.069,0.8640000000000001,0.067,-0.024,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,6,9,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,7,8,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35812259916630873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914720559900793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456455918092653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38251266618151225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32361088979299085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.604773126556372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974347953807079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsoverseven,2020/02/14,"I have a seriously distorted self image and i can not relate to anything anymore Over the last 5 years i have been fighting with depression, ocd and personality issues. I have seen different psychiatrists and 2 different therapists. My depression really faded away after treatment and i was having some really fun and fulfilling time. Right now i am not depressed at all but i have serious obsessions about social life in general. People around me sometimes make joke about how i like being under the spotlight all the time when i am in a group or how i love to show my body off and flex sometimes but the truth is these people literally ASK me to give biceps poses etc. like they are setting a trap for me and these people are so called my close friends. They saw Tinder on my phone one time and they told me do i ever swipe anyone right. These are the same people who shamed me when i was in love with a girl when i was abroad saying she looks like a guy and i deserve sooo much better etc.( also there have been some people just openly saying i am just narcissistic). This was an example from one of my friend groups but as i will mention further, others group of people tell me different things about me like i have issues but this time it is no narcissism. The general consensus is i am a very odd person like wtf i look normal i go to school i pass exams i go out i go to gym i have hobbies etc. I had 2 very happy long term relationships. I seriously do not understand what is wrong with me.

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 My first therapy ended my therapist saying that i am completely oki just have high expectetions from society. Now i am currently seeing another therapist and she tells me i have acquired this personality from my parents and we have to work on my obsessions especially on my low social flexibility.

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Now i do not now what to do after recieving these kind of different messages all over my environment according to everyone i am some kind of shit person obsessive narcissistic the list goes on and on,  i do not want to be like that and i can not really understand what i am. I can not comprehend what is going on around me and what is my normal standart. I forgot what kind of a person i am i do not know what to do in social situations. I don't know how to be ""myself"" anymore because of these inputs from therapists others and my own thoughts on my ""self"". I have zero clue and stopped going out for some time, i literally go to school gym and language course and sleep, every week ends like this. I want to create a healthy social life but seems to be impossible with these problems i guess.

​

I really want to know who and what i am, am i asking too much?

I appreciate if you think these people telling me i am odd are just regular douches, but the key here is everyone seems to be this way towards me literally 30-40 people i can say in total and this amount of people makes me start to really believe that.",3.9247986233157586,5.956350405975398,5.333300746924434,77.93904895284126,73.0597539543058,8.74869654364382,26.79265524311657,9.354420925462401,2.5175087580550657,2347,85,429,57,48,786,243,569,0.10800000000000001,0.767,0.124,0.956,6,0,0,0,2,0,53.0,1,1,3,4,26,34,2,4,17,0,60,8,4,5,6,87,94,37,0,7,20,1,0,7,2,1,2,4,0,9,30,31,0,2,9,4,0,7,10,15,0,4,12,9,84,19,63,76,17,66,0,4,5,2,47,30,1,9,34,331,114,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04135449423747549,0.0,0.22412203312164347,0.25134555296063016,0.0,0.05422510011724267,0.0,0.0,0.1025698750236942,0.036158605695225214,0.0,0.042555008754375775,0.09207023675204903,0.0966884760084042,0.0,0.048585627355655005,0.0,0.0,0.03152348035231545,0.0,0.0,0.058262316593512435,0.0,0.045735533374405786,0.0,0.057440966796681,0.0,0.0,0.052804278359090566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05421960734627894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361978759998808,0.0,0.0,0.21611436360001468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160391091158454,0.0,0.1730194328312345,0.0,0.04677694701427866,0.043570039691391865,0.09882708341739534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0439866544508991,0.0,0.0,0.07990594997680997,0.0,0.0,0.04960737408726063,0.17633654651462494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05696718560855572,0.051203538250283454,0.0,0.05504895334266273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05463713070030226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794889896072442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155193723773226,0.08525956779018591,0.04215261666085216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730521832540538,0.17684892185999956,0.0,0.0,0.045763964717005695,0.08685100776081807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334516068254033,0.0,0.0690370351322303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602932426649041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133460614682843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008350185887785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05742064852042941,0.0,0.0,0.3226586346928929,0.225766947382966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04948191048661425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564186519834415,0.0,0.0,0.05551990794349213,0.0,0.08832444185834037,0.0,0.16449552843891135,0.0,0.1046716891029685,0.04120819383638874,0.094154296351435,0.10789490073885157,0.0,0.053082172355606506,0.0,0.058127054156602374,0.051749879524014594,0.2108576617533502,0.0,0.0,0.1022900355401496,0.0,0.036602397268701715,0.0,0.0,0.043233993415299016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355971004125247,0.0,0.05913778867870183,0.2401689478541286,0.0343555093365519,0.0331353033106654,0.0,0.04105397513457065,0.15076997029037825,0.0,0.0,0.04941354170869767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766914191741377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533651157817604,0.09150417598766622,0.041047001953631534,0.04148067500214976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03764734017274074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056539537249701476,0.25134555296063016,0.03330117601596223
mentalhealth,psychedelicsweets,2020/02/14,"Medication Cure All (Asking People who have Borderline Personality Disorder) Hey y'all!

I had a question for all of y'all, since I've been lurking a few subreddits because I've had the suspicion that what I'm going through might be borderline. I've been previously diagnosed with bipolar, but on bipolar reddits, they say that since I don't have a lot of the same symptoms or experiences that people usually have, I should get a second opinion. I'm about to ask my psychologist what she thinks.

I wanted to ask, have any of you found that just taking medication 'fixed' everything? Is this an indicator that it's not actually borderline?

Especially in hs, but during my first year of college too, I dealt with feeling empty daily, really bad overeating (at times binging), feeling like the world was against me and all my friends abandoned or forgot me...I'd dissociate a lot (feeling like I'm not a part of the world/my life, like I'm living in a movie). I felt fine being alone. I'd get into these states of intense moods (usually they lasted a period of time: like, for a few months I'd be depressed, then a few months I'd be agitated depressed, then a few weeks I'd be elated, then a few days or weeks I'd be elated-agitated).

I was hospitalized in May 2018 and put on meds, and since then I've been fine. After getting on Latuda, I felt fine. Then, some mixups with other meds (Depakote, etc.) led to me not feeling so fine and going into a month of constant anxiety, flight of thoughts, and paranoia. Then, after that, an 8 months long depression. (But, none of that same emptiness, 'me against the world', or over eating came back). Then, once on an antipsychotic (Abilify), I felt fine. Then, got depressed for a couple of months, and have 3 weeks of intense mood swings and impulses and a lil paranoia, then got on Lamictal and immediately felt fine. No mood swings, no impulses, no paranoia, nothing. I feel...normal.

I should explain that, since getting on some form of medication that's a mood stabilizer or antipsychotic, I've had none of that emptiness, overeating, or feeling like my friends and family hate/forgot me, or rampant dissociation. I rarely feel guilt.

I've been in regular individualized therapy since I was 16, but nothing DBT or CBT like. I literally just got on meds, and everything silenced. Has anyone else gone through this?

(I should add, I've never self-harmed, rarely exhibit reckless behavior, and don't fear or predict abandonment from my friends anymore, since the meds. I don't isolate, do allow myself to express anger and other emotions to friends and family (and obvi my psych), and have become kinder to myself and don't blame myself for everything anymore. I've become less of a perfectionist, and more someone who just wants to be content in life, healthy and whole. I can still be pretty self-critical.

I believe I have a stable sense of self, in that there's a bunch of interests and activities I've liked/loved and wanted to get more involved with since hs (am 22 now) and my characteristics haven't changed, which I've also confirmed with my friends and family. I've known which career field I want to go into for years, and am better fine tuning exactly what that looks like.

In spite of how I felt in my hs and earlier college days, I've always had stable relationships with friends and family especially in the last few years, though how I felt about those relationships used to change (re: feeling like I give them all this love, and they abandon/forget me.) I haven't felt that way at all about my relationships since getting on meds. I haven't had a romantic relationship, so Idk about that part.)",5.538615611192932,7.0815418306332845,6.184830633284242,75.40151693667158,68.10162002945509,9.25419734904271,31.9720176730486,9.606745405546679,3.111398821796761,2889,123,514,63,49,942,281,679,0.11599999999999999,0.7040000000000001,0.18,0.9911,0,1,0,0,0,0,125.0,0,3,4,2,18,39,2,2,30,0,45,11,0,5,7,108,94,55,0,7,19,0,14,8,6,5,9,1,0,2,29,38,1,3,20,0,0,7,16,11,0,2,27,16,51,24,75,54,28,74,0,6,1,1,33,27,0,17,46,330,80,4,0.0,0.0,0.04915103898245959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216514151657661,0.0,0.040278563902855065,0.04190947474944516,0.0,0.0,0.034251365561371275,0.0,0.038530705338460695,0.0,0.09990128864654024,0.03521785810678495,0.05160706172822108,0.0,0.0,0.14125936121514698,0.0,0.0,0.03872920268400522,0.042054437434032185,0.030703325992087988,0.11125304339618286,0.0,0.05674649116887424,0.0,0.04454562043664883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05760656194283543,0.0,0.0,0.10656345907815254,0.0,0.0,0.054428958386457935,0.0,0.0,0.055730255074110585,0.0,0.06496524519328907,0.0,0.17352449039359322,0.05112156180317628,0.0,0.0,0.05772507772826566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05153813310908755,0.04207526186041759,0.056656225476497325,0.0,0.0,0.056172647497591086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13580014660562714,0.04926870344845971,0.1899265349599396,0.056677007596453687,0.20373701483791584,0.1439291089172238,0.3385223050994969,0.0,0.0,0.04284224253836503,0.0,0.05522494220559635,0.2334810500070879,0.0,0.1578884334881362,0.04831672649053632,0.0858743769953028,0.0,0.12084954967061685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04972709881597357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211184274661476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115156612833255,0.19685462712805274,0.0,0.044475085572247115,0.04457331207381837,0.04229569156417549,0.0,0.0,0.08564064055442591,0.04545828801560861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27973255318708123,0.15221870930594605,0.0,0.05343154987688304,0.0,0.0,0.20101275448371747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03884622434830135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665721106492292,0.0,0.0,0.053639333982468285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908535524601767,0.0,0.06983643186615097,0.04397862232384267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05124146355801377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05063286236028265,0.05642269618425744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032266463780536825,0.0,0.0,0.216301729832892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040053951669154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15763165773154905,0.0,0.0,0.3333135859997152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04267589334048319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040223243335025236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052350718013668286,0.03786980243566699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057599185875427124,0.0,0.0,0.0322732137449203,0.049485435047782064,0.039985863481448086,0.0587389399381834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04350101609355412,0.11094452336607524,0.0,0.1188313182676161,0.0399790717235209,0.12120438537199567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05623308551150286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730431269428877
mentalhealth,smokebiggas,2020/02/14,"I feel so trapped in this life I hate my life despite having a good one. I live in a first world country, have ok looks, and have a great gf. All you rly need to be happy right?
Every day for as long as I can remember I think about killing myself. I just feel like there’s no point in life and the only reason I want to live is bc it would destroy my gf. But I don’t see a point in working to pay taxes and die, starting a family that will die from nuclear war or climate change. 

Besides my gf I have nobody. My family hates me and sees me nothing but a criminal bc of my tattoos and the fact that I like to smoke weed and used to sell drugs. My childhood was basically all my family members ganging up on me and insulting me. My little brother bullied me constantly as a kid, my twin constantly belittled me and told me nobody loved me, my dad has tried to fight me so many times and was an alcoholic and abusive when I was younger and told me he wished I wasn’t born, my mom is the worst tho. She is obsessive and delusional. She emotionally abuses me by constantly belittling me and isolating me. She has made up lies about me and told me to kill myself. She even made my dad block me and told me he didn’t want to talk to me when he was happy that I contacted him for the first time in years.

I have been diagnosed with adhd, anxiety disorders, and clinical depression. I have tried to kill myself 3 times and spent a year of my life in rehabs where they were abusive. I can’t take it anymore I’ve tried so many medications and therapy but all I have is suicidal and negative thoughts",4.013779020979023,4.738808880000004,5.311671328671331,83.29237412587413,70.96923076923076,9.355244755244756,28.92657342657343,9.573946990214177,2.4415846153846155,1246,46,264,28,22,417,168,325,0.268,0.659,0.073,-0.9978,0,1,3,0,2,6,24.0,0,1,1,3,12,20,9,1,13,1,27,11,0,4,4,44,51,32,7,5,5,4,2,2,3,2,10,0,0,1,6,20,1,1,6,0,4,0,6,12,0,3,16,5,58,8,31,32,4,32,0,1,3,1,27,15,0,1,19,177,64,3,0.0,0.2960639817190965,0.0,0.0,0.1001014003323664,0.0,0.0,0.08901435298327832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371853548479335,0.0,0.08260377989041326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811242214499322,0.0,0.0,0.2700288109872228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05371677269809697,0.0,0.07173970928834912,0.08454013548883238,0.1728889322424751,0.0,0.0954604225715919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659285784637593,0.0,0.0,0.0936928530569918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05501391153409565,0.0,0.07017752469042011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23556227204467176,0.0,0.08423038259669083,0.05950417954510245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416971180490719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986179827366737,0.0,0.09183027669110592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17733283282501813,0.0,0.16446820179534355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764524355111536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353278275765869,0.08138501770096129,0.08348096799100065,0.1470976092096456,0.0737112425558267,0.06994472330865087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517473434646006,0.15762675724744996,0.0,0.16889104601186156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390843220717302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755117080303267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06176033429125684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992140137328067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05644115448286144,0.06334770051456431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747667241884808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856385636451284,0.0,0.0,0.0943541670285398,0.07113134097633006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327466791806545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058954861098287514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110847746200992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06262559507029156,0.06694735745153726,0.0,0.0,0.09525223420800302,0.0,0.0,0.05337047160570297,0.0,0.06612494214035426,0.1457055819214783,0.0,0.0,0.31835821751508325,0.0,0.16965042268313152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719379781198791,0.0,0.0,0.09825615055873203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578226584246803,0.0,0.0,0.06063793292855636,0.0,0.0,0.05916860311881208,0.0,0.0,0.10727527992323296
mentalhealth,MrT442,2020/02/14,"I was on a small, Australian mental health podcast. A friend of a friend hosts a podcast where guests share their stories about what mental health means to them and their personal tips for managing their mental health. I was very happy when he asked me to be a guest while I was visiting Australia. 
This is a link to the episode I was involved in, but you can listen to all of the episodes on Facebook or wherever you normally get your podcasts. 
Wanted to share because I’ve learned a lot by listening to other people’s journeys. 

The show is called How You Going Mate?

Cheers!

[How ya going, mate?](https://player.whooshkaa.com/episode?id=574465)",7.303157894736843,9.098001552631585,5.493815789473686,81.0554605263158,64.17543859649122,8.156140350877193,32.671052631578945,8.472884824447931,2.589442105263158,523,21,87,7,8,150,78,114,0.0,0.8540000000000001,0.146,0.9334,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,5,4,0,5,6,0,0,10,0,8,3,0,2,1,12,16,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,5,0,3,2,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,14,6,14,11,2,11,0,0,0,0,24,5,0,2,2,59,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657182123256112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080586855007038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18100669229809435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273907951205802,0.0,0.09261329203058677,0.0,0.20148679872001587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887011671907851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.56527105571223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150703787696067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930928136845904,0.0,0.0,0.5359222312700507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368139896953855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289276134872805,0.15478036873500187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462616304306001,0.10455508998946343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pinkwintershadows,2020/02/14,"i need some help, please. this was x posted to another sub, the reason i posted this again is to know if what kind of trauma or disorder i have.

i remember that i was still 10-14 years old that time. this is what happened when my mom reprimanded me. i just tried to voice out my opinion in a calm manner when she was scolding me but she took it as a sign of disrespect and she thought that I was talking back at her when I was just really trying to defend myself without raising my voice. She then got really mad at me and slapped me, very hard that my cheeks started to get red. Then she continued to say that I won’t reach the gates of heaven when it’s armageddon and I will burn and rot in hell for talking back at her which I clearly did not. I was so shocked that she could say that to her own child. After that, she would often say that I would burn in hell every time she is scolding me. She tried to reason out that she was just saying that to help me get to heaven and not rot in hell. But it still didn’t quite sit well with me. There was also a time where she got really upset with something I did that I just stretched out my arm for her to hit it since she said i need it for me to get disciplined. I was expecting her to hit my arm very hard but instead, she SLAPPED me really hard. I was shocked at what she did to me that I cried. I was 13 or something at that time. 

i remembered her face that time. it was full of anger and hatred. i was scared. although sometimes when she say those kind of things and slaps me, she would feel guilty and try to cook me something or give me some food. but she never apologized for it. i remember one time where she offered me some snacks when she slapped me in the face in my early teens. i rejected it and she was mad. in the end, i just accepted it to not anger her anymore.

it’s been a long time since then and im already 24. my mom doesn’t say that to me anymore and she even accepted me when i said that im gay and i’m really thankful for it. our relationship got better since then when i turned into an adult. however, I never forgot about those. so many years have passed and I thought I forgot about all of those until now. I didn’t know that I would still remember those vividly, like it was just yesterday. is this like what they call an “episode” for me? do i have an anxiety disorder or trauma or something like that?


I hope you can help me with this. Thank you very much to those who’ll respond!",2.3043118069145443,3.80242281996086,3.3796575342465762,92.50227168949772,76.18199608610567,6.9018917155903425,22.734181343770384,7.62386473244151,0.7371531637312456,1915,54,434,26,42,616,194,511,0.171,0.7240000000000001,0.106,-0.9925,1,1,4,0,3,0,43.0,1,2,1,2,33,29,7,2,11,0,39,9,5,2,4,75,67,41,0,10,20,2,4,3,0,7,0,10,1,2,48,20,3,3,13,1,0,2,10,14,1,1,31,16,94,15,55,26,7,64,5,1,2,1,56,20,3,12,42,318,142,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502742297539375,0.0543706851237224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129227182290652,0.05201130935564166,0.0,0.1348534054380754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045585085557438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06013064190280652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942425109495824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054283590722144746,0.0,0.07468259539802499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15584230026053453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021797011559006,0.0,0.0,0.04490601596370058,0.0,0.05728356621375444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034377222052020234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221242712583399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106564155596083,0.06522113173056192,0.0,0.0,0.16313076177025787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06012234464745213,0.0,0.18271405421104064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671454527239604,0.0,0.0,0.06752830152598162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468793210530181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14159991834245533,0.07472982400228151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964780186063622,0.0,0.0,0.06016802191686901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893005602441406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592555159668553,0.0,0.0,0.0499796518623206,0.1008257904325819,0.10487443581062032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071342895684806,0.0,0.046071026646528214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07463137679018379,0.0,0.0,0.13022911198757192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231454592412596,0.0,0.0,0.21777709683229396,0.13980779039036714,0.0,0.07299461614883336,0.3080726029233021,0.0,0.12934599394768742,0.3244049315288524,0.06806873257985559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16872331963806106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093646548952021,0.06724274369928017,0.0,0.048122881282067514,0.0,0.16288802922304566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092937774687437,0.0,0.12519005763401536,0.0,0.0,0.04516879277198475,0.0,0.0,0.10795115724549753,0.27751405076258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553815058220464,0.18463995443614756,0.0739523811399338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682938463929745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06113017090000353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553885696558959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19318940697801568,0.0,0.0,0.08756522302104539
mentalhealth,gbeyer__,2020/02/14,"I hear voices Hello I’m a 16 almost 17 year old diagnosed w deppression and anxiety but I have never told anyone that I hear voices what should I do? 
They are very self critical and paranoid about over people 
They don’t tell me to hurt anyone else but they tell me to hurt my self and two or three times I have tried to kill my self but been stopped by over people 
Can any one give me some advice of what to do?",0.9981609195402292,3.1034035287356336,2.557011494252876,93.94747126436785,82.67816091954023,5.705747126436782,16.563218390804597,6.937597516519254,-0.1808022988505749,325,6,72,4,9,106,57,87,0.266,0.7340000000000001,0.0,-0.9792,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,3,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,9,1,0,0,1,12,14,7,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,3,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,3,2,4,13,0,9,11,1,7,0,2,0,0,13,2,0,3,5,47,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15272446861086889,0.0,0.0,0.1565015407191638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628234329327707,0.0,0.11956117909450242,0.0,0.0,0.218562759411884,0.16013724886759062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863073755463242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055997481883744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14992730443033944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35229966124081424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33462267449687944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17291137710443572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054023786106033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399973070791884,0.0,0.1059059334632126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167031738537975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4891326721235145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13066517250263845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27320814196775695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09113377053547253,0.0,0.0,0.14934148898326202,0.0,0.10611043508533806,0.0,0.1526723097242067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12895535578943298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064543117422634
mentalhealth,DacheinAus,2020/02/14,"Increasing feeling of being unsettled I’m not exactly sure what to do about this. But, I’m having an increasing feeling of being unsettled. Nothing “feels right”. But, there’s no sense of impeding doom. I don’t feel depressed, or anxious about tomorrow, no one is “out to get me”, I don’t feel right. I’ve been depressed before, and anxious (who hasn’t). This is a different feeling. Just very very unsettled. I’ve cut back my media consumption and have tried to focus on being “in the moment”. Not really working though. Remember those cartoons from  high school chemistry talking about atoms that get excited when heat is applied? That’s how I feel all the time. Deep in my soul, just buzzing, unsettled. I can almost describe it like being on steroids, yet not the physical heart racing.",3.4800000000000004,6.391074777777781,4.226944444444449,80.78750000000005,79.0,7.7666666666666675,29.83333333333333,8.660442795831766,2.985841666666667,624,30,104,15,16,199,93,144,0.205,0.735,0.06,-0.9642,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,1,11,7,1,0,5,0,15,1,1,1,3,28,26,8,0,0,8,0,7,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,8,0,0,2,8,4,0,1,1,7,7,3,15,21,3,17,2,3,0,0,2,9,0,6,7,70,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15557314871814787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35103091177305584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946420866307725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322020844801289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676270681024842,0.0,0.0,0.16232079435229355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5498918030956775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234103687949938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18410536620225726,0.0,0.16414906087070552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759022927847101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907455396983785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527768264193917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952922587506877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17599547959975625,0.2653575324535773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15723519194527985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642736188004654,0.0,0.0,0.12487453022669068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15264291358037385,0.0,0.0905931505313578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548097112795553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25638074426668583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310578455396796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,K-P-Varavs,2020/02/14,"I have a fear of wasting time, of not doing enough It’s strange to me because I have been incredibly lazy my entire life, maybe that’s why? Maybe it’s because I feel ashamed of not doing enough and now am trying to make up for it, that’s what I would tell myself if I knew that isn’t what I feel.

I feel a need to constantly be productive, I spend all day reading, writing, completing assignments, playing chess, learning languages and yet I still feel I am not doing enough. Is this normal? I am only 15, so this is likely me just coming to terms with the fact that life is too short to doing absolutely nothing and regret it afterwards.",5.162066929133861,5.623344133858268,5.8390452755905535,81.47463090551183,68.29133858267717,8.55472440944882,30.04822834645669,8.472884824447931,2.1350480314960625,503,18,99,7,8,164,77,127,0.11599999999999999,0.848,0.037000000000000005,-0.861,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,2,3,0,16,2,0,1,2,24,24,5,0,5,5,0,4,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,12,5,0,0,6,3,1,1,4,3,0,0,2,4,15,2,11,20,5,11,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,9,74,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20870438732746865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14745988113475567,0.17948319484193462,0.1849891183750787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039953537230872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5306365791561917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19262962177160106,0.3462231491519185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418246808184585,0.08363186849432183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426666693481655,0.0,0.3439547265732669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693078656296067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677240001308322,0.16425569025718045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019316597848818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17123035129921654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13670778466677186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962238437661676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981878246042966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11622271715886255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15446695791758513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160422089499068,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EtherealFlower-,2020/02/14,"Why in the hell is it so hard to find a psychiatrist?! I’m starting to really lose hope. I cannot for the life of me find a decent psychiatrist where I live. They either don’t take my insurance (and I can’t afford the co-pay), they aren’t accepting new patients, they have awful reviews and aren’t recommended, don’t take insurance at all and only accept out of pocket payment, etc. I’m about ready to give up. 

I have SEVERE anxiety. It affects my daily life and I want to get better. I also have depression, and I’m fairly certain I could also have OCD. I’m literally going insane and I need the help. I’ve been pushing my mental health on the back burner for far too long, and it’s getting to the point where I’m just so tired and exhausted that I don’t even want to leave the house. 

I’m just beyond frustrated.",3.5408928571428566,4.520250351190477,5.462857142857146,80.83214285714288,72.27380952380952,8.457142857142857,25.309523809523807,8.841846274778883,1.7844309523809518,641,19,130,12,12,222,100,168,0.19899999999999998,0.6709999999999999,0.13,-0.9361,3,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,3,2,14,10,2,0,9,1,14,5,0,1,2,24,31,12,0,5,3,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,9,0,0,4,0,0,2,7,5,0,0,1,1,16,5,17,29,3,16,1,2,0,0,5,10,1,1,4,82,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26720039153995084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278027138402693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284611108051792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775361965200193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333861865281429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389109020484467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18631937128384155,0.11034351526650944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053850537162125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17456701182879514,0.16026202259019598,0.09494573512160316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965560550980536,0.0,0.0,0.1775801235896081,0.0,0.0,0.1119787864326302,0.0,0.0,0.1659312234774248,0.0,0.19276823566106413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689556194272055,0.0,0.0,0.23600303096734235,0.0,0.0,0.14751966216246967,0.1478454701995032,0.0,0.18690072900511415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16836017889407578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387507449835528,0.0,0.1613504562766919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705891589793494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15792850501458086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702481568810301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887336021305716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824802916626075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512211225493457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920143066496237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19707613486974945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15074834433554818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KushlungsMcBone,2020/02/14,"I made an album about my journey through existential depression and anxiety and wanted to share it in the hopes that it will help others who are on that same journey. "" This album is the story of my journey through existential terror, from  denial to the initial revelation of my own impermanence and irrelevance,  through the ensuing nihilism, depression, anxiety,  self-destructiveness, fear, and suicidality, and finally to the stages of  existentialism, acceptance, and regaining internal peace. If you can  relate to these issues, then please know that this album is for you. I hope it helps you  on your journey, wherever you may be. Believe me when I say that I love  you, and that I'm glad you're here, even if it's just for this cosmic  blink of an eye. I hope you enjoy the album! ""  


It's called ""a b o l i s h \_ f e a r"". It's sort of a fusion of a lot of styles; it has elements of vaporwave, chillhop, synthwave, rock, chiptune, shoegaze, funk, jazz, and noise music. The album is FREE to stream at the following link: [https://lithiumthief.bandcamp.com/album/a-b-o-l-i-s-h-f-e-a-r](https://lithiumthief.bandcamp.com/album/a-b-o-l-i-s-h-f-e-a-r)",8.652384212645996,10.568766586387435,7.561989528795812,67.0155014095852,61.146596858638745,10.693677003624648,33.54047523157471,10.727762888450028,3.908045992750706,922,36,143,23,13,282,116,191,0.084,0.726,0.19,0.9691,0,0,0,0,0,0,76.0,0,7,0,0,5,13,0,2,14,0,9,2,1,1,0,23,18,12,1,6,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,18,8,0,0,3,2,1,5,0,4,0,0,1,2,17,10,24,14,3,13,0,2,1,1,14,4,0,8,3,100,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817307169644141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20746090036228265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880258762758732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171962377799586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162166488600898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072068736515939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017145972419136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24684815242577035,0.0,0.0,0.548672885954956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19219263051070207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119763930007444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654786781573868,0.16619207930549507,0.17423618965119628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021286480923704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643423241132342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19209649187098865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20141750341259795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108609588765899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,harrybutterr,2020/02/14,"Is my anxiety normal or am I just overthinking? The way this group of “friends” (honestly I am like acquaintances with most of them) makes me feel so anxious. I’m in my last year of uni and I can’t be myself. I feel that I’m forgotten, irrelevant and not exciting because they all speak to each other but not me. Sometimes we’ll have catch-ups for all 7 of us and not everyone can attend them because of priorities and I avoid them sometimes because I’m not sure if I’m anxious or overthinking. I feel that if I confess to someone that I feel neglected they will say “Yea but you never speak to us, you don’t attend many events, why are you complaining if you don’t reach out?”. UM, I’ve spent money on birthday presents, I’ve sent messages but stopped because no one responds, I congratulate people when they get a job or graduate and sometimes I’ve gone out with them. I feel like they’ll say I feel this way because I keep doing what I’m doing which is not talking and not turning up.

I haven’t left my house to attend any event with people my age since Christmas last year and feel miserableeee. My “friends” want to go bowling to catch up because a friend is flying back to a city for uni in a few days. So everyone is rushing to see her before she leaves. I remember last year when I left to go on exchange and invited everyone, they attended but weren’t ecstatic. I know comparison is the thief of joy but I can’t think properly.

TLDR; friends become apprentices, I’m not sure I’m in anxious or overthinking but its affected my social confidence",4.105652173913043,5.509160259740264,5.187154150197628,81.72464426877472,71.40259740259741,8.863015245623941,31.248447204968947,9.318704503766252,2.817694918125353,1232,55,241,27,23,406,151,308,0.12300000000000001,0.7490000000000001,0.128,0.7652,3,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,3,4,9,0,6,15,0,1,6,1,22,0,0,2,5,60,49,25,0,5,21,0,7,2,4,3,0,4,0,0,9,14,0,4,11,0,3,10,15,4,1,1,4,12,44,11,29,41,5,39,1,1,1,0,34,11,0,8,18,150,53,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254495915560092,0.0,0.07035927917421221,0.3117107564348635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072174671867645,0.0,0.3363962117087682,0.10157722095317204,0.07826245566697845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059315132996192135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636531254185922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32553104613020656,0.06570570319597938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842331976542561,0.0,0.048052223426260865,0.0,0.1045410270735078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612477388976674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126925200059656,0.08175004431810601,0.0,0.0,0.05054608905982043,0.22491140571794493,0.0,0.09738638447820927,0.1998583953189436,0.0,0.0,0.08986696159058324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613928539048026,0.09324643265858816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093543499339962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011425039845808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062323449761682276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752533240798616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041877552379657,0.0,0.0,0.1462816287822981,0.0,0.0,0.07329076687701233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608121705762892,0.0,0.0,0.09375513880294227,0.07792863035275846,0.0,0.2728916673118401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689374946020808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17336738618962175,0.0,0.0,0.07392460886099042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05893274041524685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000404776323508,0.0,0.0,0.22126497399074524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424820168218651,0.14600815862632407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299154630950485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17768325914549202
mentalhealth,toughluckbuddy,2020/02/14,"A rant by a recent graduate who feels aimless I've been meaning to rant and just spill out my feelings in Reddit for months now. I haven't managed to post anything though because whenever I'm starting to write something, or I'm in the middle of it, I just think 'what's the point?', 'who cares?', 'you're not special, everybody goes through this' and 'just shut up and suck it up'.

But this week has been especially hard so here it goes. Straight into the text box:

I graduated from a top Russell Group university last June 2019. I actually chose the university because it had an excellent Geography department (second in the world).

I'm from a low-income immigrant family so this was amazing for me and my family. It really was. And despite suggesting subjects with more clear-cut routes such as medicine or law, my family nevertheless wholeheartedly supported my decision to study Geography.

During my studies, I was so sure of everything. So sure of loving Geography and sustainable development. So sure of pursuing urban development—maybe get into research or a consulting role. 

I tried getting 'relevant' work experience but I failed to secure one.

But I was eager to get a role—any role—in sustainable development so I applied to 'irrelevant' roles (though I guess they have transferrable skills). The opportunities I had weren't all bad. In fact, it enabled me to go to other countries (for 1-2 months each) with considerable financial support (as in, at the least, flight tickets and accommodation weren't a worry). They were all related to educational inequality though which is I cause I am also passionate about but, at the time, didn't really want to pursue. I told myself that I wanted to go into urban development. To work with local communities and get their voices heard in the planning of their spaces.

Whatever.

After interning abroad for 3 months and going back to my country of birth to spend the 'ber months', I'm back in the UK. I did apply for the graduate programme while abroad. I got two assessment centres in the end. One offer for a teaching job.

Initially, I wanted to take the teaching job. I just wanted to end my job search. But 4 things stopped me:

1.) Can I really (legitimately) empower kids (like I claimed in my assessment centre) when I can't even achieve the, albeit cloudy, vision I built in my head?

2.) The responses that friends and families give. Not one has just said 'Yay! congrats'. Everybody seemed to squeeze in 'oh, but you don't have to take the first job offer you get' or 'you can do better' and 'how are you progressing with your other applications'?. I feel like I hyped everyone up—that I'm gonna be this person influencing policymakers and fighting for marginalised people the urban Global South (wherever that is anymore). And I'm disappointing them.

3.) It's 4 hours away from home. I'm very close with my family and accepting the job would mean being away for 2 years. I can visit of course, but with the allegedly crazy work-life imbalance of teachers, I don't think it's going to be that straightforward. 

4.) Linking to point 3, the pay. I have a close friend who comes from a similar background but has been sooooo successful in assessment centres (after uni she got 3 offers) with salaries that are waaay above NQT pay range. Am I really not competitive enough for roles like those? Am I not worth roles like those? 

I know I can perform well in a professional context. I've got an offer from one of my internships abroad (because I thought it's time to kickstart my career back in the UK. It's a decision I am now regretting) and academic wise I have a very good work ethic (got a first-class).

I know the world of work is a whole different game.

And maybe it's just not my time.

And probably I just need more experience acing applications and interviews.

But right now I just feel like a fraud. I don't know what I want. 

I'm still applying for jobs in the charity sector (hopefully with an iNGO). But so far, everything has been unsuccessful at the CV/cover letter stage. 

I'm considering applying for a masters in urban development. I'm drafting my personal statement right now. But honestly, I don't have the money. Honestly, right now the path that I wanted to take before just feels like a very middle-class journey right now. And I'm dying so much to start helping my very working-class family right now. 

I feel like one big excuse and I'm trying not to be by just going for different jobs that may possibly lead me to where I want to go (which to be honest I don't know anymore) and I feel like I'm spreading myself thin because of it.

I just really don't know. I feel paralysed. I know it's just my first permanent job. There are loads more later on. I'm just scared that doors might close and I'll regret it. That if I don't apply for a masters programme now and just accept the teaching job, for example, it'll be harder to chase after tutors and professors to write a reference for me.

Life is feeling really overwhelming right now. 

Before I didn't care what people think. I loved learning Geography and that's all that mattered.

But now I'm questioning whether I should pursue it. If it's all worth it. If I'm worth it to these development agencies.

And now, I've been magnifying people's opinions so much. 

Oh, life.",4.029060788608984,6.302866177710843,5.2682676159182185,77.45065991237679,73.46787148594376,8.90478276743337,28.18565169769989,9.487046200335737,2.8439662650602417,4187,168,755,109,88,1388,401,996,0.064,0.805,0.131,0.9971,13,0,1,0,2,0,141.0,0,5,5,22,51,47,2,2,51,1,62,6,1,4,8,149,143,64,1,16,40,0,12,8,2,6,2,4,2,3,48,43,0,2,32,2,7,11,19,9,1,9,25,16,87,38,107,106,13,108,0,5,0,3,46,53,1,14,50,479,135,37,0.0,0.0,0.04571594640689135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03746355533575998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03185758886857485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291933705357602,0.0,0.0,0.038551116503284064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880286591589717,0.10806742996310603,0.03911531572287373,0.11423006590509872,0.0,0.07972674921030445,0.0,0.0,0.04143239367270147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09552734459528542,0.04812480746293176,0.0,0.040354570778503684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048619824023742514,0.09789035712888401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298513253967607,0.04840550805284876,0.0,0.030942023447679507,0.0,0.0,0.04476434758237505,0.08420618502742612,0.09165077495882044,0.26497928039447155,0.0,0.21318540716094167,0.1673376485489851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954418692149445,0.0,0.0,0.07238780291743772,0.0,0.12237820591794513,0.044939942766745004,0.15974549054165252,0.03929306860758572,0.14987140727613046,0.0,0.051607288390789416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041965739840504515,0.0,0.0480785711901652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03140057870254168,0.0,0.04699139373625432,0.0465296741284708,0.04613489085314105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4183960644069397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15447542496680267,0.038186584455670886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617888962733914,0.1830967517684872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845625525601697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412828256261416,0.1020603051517226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0496972987993283,0.0,0.0,0.14957141905966495,0.0,0.06887591903413834,0.0347364813460361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872380973496508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974335021965912,0.08181004441933355,0.0,0.0,0.08857117689998556,0.052812990770603765,0.044866507863302624,0.0,0.05050902497864794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05247939836658055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006845342056774,0.0,0.046255793383555205,0.0,0.0,0.2400426610993209,0.044562256211149134,0.0,0.04690205252771109,0.0,0.0,0.04264777935870675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036065134714462564,0.0,0.0,0.06631714210422349,0.0,0.037412101039646116,0.03916621722898896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632291568965767,0.1324583224694732,0.0,0.10566941581070204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031123087075546382,0.09005306136869955,0.1380809160945778,0.03719131130887194,0.08195064496510139,0.0,0.0,0.04476434758237505,0.0,0.06361212052478579,0.0,0.045762744065477895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461483365319878,0.1934211566476187,0.0,0.03757786407406874,0.0,0.042121108736912584,0.0,0.0,0.05230303930005265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17052598971547128,0.04757543598380328,0.0,0.033278788110423015,0.0,0.0,0.030167953288359292
mentalhealth,Skholla,2020/02/14,"What's a good mental health charity to donate to? One that will actually put the money towards helping others and not just satisfying the board members. I am selling a painting and 100% of the proceeds will go towards some sort of mental health charity, cause, etc. Any suggestions?",6.203400000000002,8.526737139999998,6.749000000000002,68.93950000000001,67.6,9.0,36.5,9.516144504307137,4.1046000000000005,227,12,33,5,4,74,39,50,0.045,0.752,0.203,0.8215,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,3,2,0,1,0,7,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,6,2,2,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,1,25,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.2499630483798369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17418911022303873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631340816847619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28567221557767464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455745493608354,0.21484440291210136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5445457120088526,0.0,0.0,0.17169029606253813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5162729456236135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17357220160636275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574990251638341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,han1han,2020/02/14,"Depression? Hello. I kinda need to get something off my chest. I think i might have depression? Im not sure but all the signs point to it. I used to be a motivated person who worked on my drawing skills, learned, read books/things that interest me, ate healthy and generally did things I loved but lately I do absolutely nothing all day. I dont like leaving my room and when Im not obligated to go outside I neglect my hygene completely. Sometimes I dont shower for days. I pretty much spend all my time waching netflix shows or videos as if trying to numb my brain. I do sometimes go out when I make plans with friends but the second Im home I feel like shit/miserable and just do things that make me feel bad I guess. I havent slept well in weeks/months. I isolate myself and avoid messages and hate talking to people. The only person I consistently text is my boyfriend bc I feel comfortable with him and talking to him doesnt drain me. I get angry so easily nowadays. I used to go on walks in the nature or shop by myself ans honestly just enjoy my life more but now I hate leaving my house. I literally dont feel like doing anything or seeing anyone I just want to rot away in this room. I dont know what to do because I feel as if nothing can make me feel better. I have a critical inner voice and it feels like I cant stop shit-talking myself and sort of feels like I deserve it? since Im not doing a damn thing all day its like wow youre useless. So yeah. 

Thanks to anyone who reads this. 
I wish everyone a nice day",1.4126573426573437,3.684583692307694,3.112016317016317,89.59055944055945,82.26923076923076,5.833100233100232,22.59557109557109,7.106945922332613,0.7927871794871795,1200,41,249,16,33,397,167,312,0.17300000000000001,0.622,0.205,0.9551,1,1,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,0,5,9,28,3,1,9,1,20,7,3,6,5,60,51,23,0,5,15,0,8,6,1,1,2,1,4,2,14,11,1,3,12,6,2,4,10,10,1,1,3,10,48,18,26,46,6,26,0,4,1,1,13,12,1,9,16,153,62,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100485365588552,0.0,0.06475797872491992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393505758146203,0.0,0.06570571784048332,0.04797077781779956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959793415453336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784788108261123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250855261879847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030029804490381,0.0,0.1355570529519019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689124039700438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519493418893378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31831805696131843,0.2248743770352836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06079834031359115,0.0,0.08222812695505774,0.0,0.13416985052841449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668967300536816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538691863152174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893591552834693,0.0,0.0,0.09080163994779353,0.0,0.0,0.3400095855232637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04324784507287875,0.0,0.08876960427848578,0.1666499365811216,0.0,0.0,0.05558348908209925,0.2306737773979044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102388304564278,0.0,0.1575854047450342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348128174338952,0.0,0.0,0.06281233626850175,0.0,0.0578487175474163,0.05835017306939885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510169158116102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059849891212401536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054556108310583724,0.1374241162520065,0.0,0.0,0.07439071691791048,0.0,0.0,0.08005949791999027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574294291178495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06270846647340521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155532750176835,0.06509600939392808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06058203856045472,0.1556596071572698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579122194384167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416761611116167,0.0,0.0,0.1897523680205753,0.0,0.0724503274228956,0.0,0.0,0.1568412326413714,0.050423565395582175,0.0,0.0,0.0458867654558627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053427665930767546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593169537464145,0.0,0.0,0.046415417403647054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075483438262184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049354821381496,0.0,0.0,0.05728974626765835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wuyump7,2020/02/14,"Am I bipolar? I have an anxiety disorder, trichotillomania, and several ""tics"" (possibly tourrettes), always thought I was normal, had no idea what anxiety, tics, or trichotillomania was until a few years ago.  I don't know any different because this is the way I've always felt.  

Bipolar runs in my family & I had a traumatic childhood that really messed with my head.  People have told me my behavior can be extreme & the more I step back the more I see what they're saying is true.  Even delusions of grandeur, I've always had these but couldn't see that I was being delusional.  

I always thought bipolar was getting random feelings without thought but my emotions are almost entirely fueled by negative thoughts, or perhaps it is making me have these thoughts.   Everyday is an emotional roller coaster, I think of something that gets me mad & fills me with rage, I think of something sad & it makes me tear up, I start imagining something great I could be achieving & I get excited & happy, and often I catch myself smiling just thinking about happy things.  Idk if that's what bipolar or normal but that's everyday & I kind of like it, the good comes with the bad.  I feel extremely confident and my creativity, energy, and focus towards a goal has driven me to things others have failed to achieve.",6.656625000000003,7.926559412500001,6.780000000000001,73.17000000000002,65.29166666666666,10.0,35.83333333333333,10.125756701596842,3.912958333333333,1049,50,173,24,16,336,141,240,0.146,0.684,0.16899999999999998,0.8540000000000001,1,0,3,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,0,5,5,14,2,0,10,0,25,5,1,2,1,41,48,12,0,5,9,0,3,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,17,8,0,0,14,1,0,6,5,6,0,0,15,6,29,8,16,28,3,18,0,2,2,0,2,3,0,7,9,117,46,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743876532392569,0.0,0.08403108808865901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793037772007444,0.6364707737059306,0.0,0.0570666647146487,0.0,0.12839306151627966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452724987778018,0.07006746859511212,0.0511552278660418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228735262485828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700116272074662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767575305395588,0.0961765349309503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18879141139477354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05542660761195629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910979396977329,0.0,0.08486225092899095,0.0,0.08057380055998302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315300302413381,0.0,0.0,0.07038587826245285,0.0,0.0925191569027191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786631247919408,0.0,0.0,0.0861233947549297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09473245554443517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738698973202741,0.04611877209540454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04099777052580244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203094404281956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16444233981213469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058177713163467384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460418518542793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0537595929362862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673443212956805,0.0,0.0,0.13374250064324816,0.0,0.0,0.0948027012119059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938109904484064,0.0,0.0,0.05939712086981825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150189566147636,0.16131251743048672,0.0,0.33310494738274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018660876037823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660967363654859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808933153033269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05404001170760914
mentalhealth,guitarman011,2020/02/14,"Feeling like all I do is push those away that I love.. Bit of a rant but I figured this was the best place. Whenever I think I like someone, or if things are going good it seems that all I do is push people away. And then I always beat myself up over it. It just seems that I'm self destructive when it comes to my happiness or whenever I think I'm happy it scares me and I always end up alone. What am I supposed to do? I'm sick and tired of this vicious cycle I keep putting myself through time and time again. Right now it feels like I'm just meant to be alone...

What am I supposed to do?",0.05429696287963637,2.095810070866144,1.7919516310461212,98.37238188976379,86.08661417322836,4.888413948256468,18.520247469066366,6.1826913282559595,-0.32983194600674937,457,12,109,4,14,149,72,127,0.16399999999999998,0.638,0.198,0.7278,0,2,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,7,11,2,1,2,0,11,3,0,0,2,22,26,10,0,1,6,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,15,5,0,1,8,0,0,5,0,3,0,0,2,2,16,8,12,23,4,19,0,0,0,1,2,7,0,5,10,73,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3235478798532001,0.0,0.0,0.2599383670153623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935061780877724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16392008205037695,0.0,0.17052767545639813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455067873045035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834499651892734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579567247447238,0.22317565277058676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08877087841541181,0.1310114058596077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3325511840171076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13883588955969134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289312438640211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14097472259835175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828797166986223,0.0,0.1631935830162967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702205334152652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333921715768471,0.0,0.0,0.15638136844752135,0.0,0.0,0.284393442842276,0.16294849770697672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323459920718028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377095851636133,0.20017064230334675,0.0,0.0,0.1821605283653308,0.17952653321165354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WizardOfAzz,2020/02/14,"I do not see a bright future ahead of me *I'm sorry if this is poorly written. I can't think straight right now and I'm feeling like shit. If you manage to read this then I'm thankful for the precious time that you've wasted on such a hopless cause that I call myself.*

I've been diagnosed with severe OCD and Depression (going through treatment atm). I've spent the last 2 years doing next to nothing; I've wasted 90% of my time in my room. I have no motivation to do anything at all. 

I'm a computer science student. I've been for the most part learning all courses on my own as I rarely leave the house. Lately I lost all motivation to study and can't even force myself anymore. I've lost my scholarship due to failing many courses. What I want is to get a job as a programmer but I've been rejected for all the jobs that I applied to because I don't have an official degree even though that I finished almost all the programming courses that I need. I've tried to get a part-time job but haven't had any luck with that either.

I blamed my laziness on my depression but recently I realised that I'm just trying to come up with excuses so I can feel a bit better about myself. I'm a lazy piece of shit and I hate myself for it. In fact I hate myself for many reasons and can't even see any good aspects in myself. I just hate my life.

I got a gym membership recently and haven't skipped any sessions (I follow a program), started eating exclusively healthy meals that are devoid of any type of junk etc etc. And yet I still feel like shit and can't bring myself to do anything, let alone study. I've lost all motivation.

I'm so lost; I don't know what to do anymore. I love programming, and my dream is to make games but that is so far fetched right now. I'm taking multiple medications and they don't seem to help me with my motivation issue. I don't have any plans for the future and I all I can think about is that I'm a disappointment and I won't amount to anything. I have no one to talk to about this because no one will understand and give me advice.

What should I do? Am I just a lazy and worthless piece of shit?",2.3975546975546957,4.022917911564627,3.9087185144328025,88.26790954219527,76.23356009070295,6.944438315866887,25.297603726175154,7.730073105063049,1.2515620641049208,1673,59,358,24,37,555,191,441,0.21600000000000005,0.693,0.091,-0.9958,3,2,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,1,1,12,18,26,7,0,20,0,37,10,4,7,8,60,80,27,0,5,11,0,3,2,0,3,3,0,1,0,17,19,2,0,14,4,4,4,15,17,0,2,11,6,50,9,47,65,17,36,0,10,3,1,9,13,4,6,21,228,67,19,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07815732461415976,0.0,0.0,0.08009025555537821,0.08283706099525591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27195195639184755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15864097940745334,0.0,0.0,0.19745470878054835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751236990915116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073743442274781,0.08731944996561312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167039721804095,0.0,0.0,0.08216337774033651,0.0,0.06889726977042443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777647656085668,0.08117988009132057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184138587225821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17840177910930474,0.1584817453580622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12132365863339578,0.11427807945829314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357441652325115,0.07672586526226137,0.04545552066813943,0.06708496945299461,0.06396878085169154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368965135325248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05361013882890507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228830035419416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348025701079169,0.2381088929475468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043955925444213055,0.06519587149852488,0.09022299494465164,0.08468921602103557,0.0,0.0817868464020872,0.056493536219083436,0.07815017021195564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3492384891828217,0.0,0.0721867298278539,0.0,0.05338849670155973,0.16217805642802374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057328540866629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059305518061612376,0.0,0.0,0.08506159012333511,0.0,0.0,0.0767447289112789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10839552424752508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732250687622891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000348037420256,0.0,0.0,0.08223464852174049,0.15794482824183234,0.0,0.0,0.1366081021234253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747033626211868,0.0728124597264099,0.0,0.09035670892885228,0.3284008217665612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953311736440785,0.0566115552936588,0.0,0.06387359766888964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060136386925065274,0.06428637024203136,0.0,0.07363652883150791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249826216425993,0.07858174793079549,0.0,0.09327610371592243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10860483320515266,0.0,0.0,0.08326391214668473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047175359221220334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05150568017531326
mentalhealth,thrwawayaccount567,2020/02/14,I feel like my emotions are fighting in my head to determine how I'll feel for the day. I just recently got out of this major depressive hole in my head. I finally felt positive for the most part for the past two days with only two small meltdowns from overthinking. But now I've been feeling that extremely depressive state creeping back and it feels like my positive emotions and thoughts are fighting with the negative ones in my head. It feels like they're two people fighting for control over how I see things and how I should overall feel. Please help me... I don't know what to do and I just want to cry at this point.,3.934672131147544,5.8235636147541,4.159803278688525,86.96839344262295,72.68852459016394,8.158688524590165,29.41311475409836,8.841846274778883,2.3299219672131137,499,21,99,10,10,155,75,122,0.142,0.693,0.16399999999999998,0.25,0,0,0,0,6,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,3,0,4,0,6,3,3,4,0,26,18,8,0,2,3,0,7,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,9,0,0,0,2,5,0,4,4,8,13,3,17,13,3,16,0,2,1,0,4,8,0,1,10,66,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010375524382756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14601285609461429,0.0,0.0,0.14300143247953806,0.1679163151703621,0.0,0.2242552377968781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928798185912911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39495081593557424,0.2790112491289861,0.12499742396582345,0.14261062895382473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412034419486732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4008202075391908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725984820848144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154593265215195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19080454198951144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882163075766744,0.09901109011802314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409770011447089,0.12427572488807685,0.09025345989782776,0.0,0.0,0.1429033596387126,0.12306632188459805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285413733182311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10374009876019323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648871983278769,0.0,0.0,0.10335185890137297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38151367895974064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678612245273207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FacialClaire,2020/02/14,"Feeling very attacked the past few weeks I've been having a tumultuous month with a lot of life changes. I learned that I am being transfered to another company (which I'm very glad about, because the atmosphere at my old workplace is rather toxic). I cut out some other toxic relationships from my life. I started a few courses on things I really wanted to learn for a long time. So things should be absolutely fantastic. However, for the past few weeks I've been having the feeling that people are trying to start fights with me for some reason. It's like people have decided to stop listening to me, twist my words, blame me for all sorts of things that aren't my fault, try to make me feel bad or just be incredibly unreasonable. In short, I just feel very attacked all the time and I don't know if it's just all in my head. Anyway, my mom thinks it's either because I'm hormonal or because I have suddenly become mentally unstable and my friends are no help at all either.

​

Can anybody help me figure out what is wrong with me?",7.128105310531055,6.776899470297033,7.285679567956798,75.53551305130516,64.1980198019802,10.711791179117911,34.205220522052194,10.230975488527342,3.3531722772277224,831,32,156,17,11,269,116,202,0.128,0.762,0.11,-0.5916,1,0,0,0,1,0,23.0,0,0,0,0,7,10,4,0,9,0,18,3,1,2,4,40,31,6,0,4,9,1,4,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,12,7,0,1,11,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,5,21,3,24,25,12,21,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,7,14,108,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137987124136249,0.15474806084169568,0.0,0.1335409199526117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897652694127081,0.0,0.0,0.10633459100495164,0.2328999609362277,0.14065158862422303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472278466360396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257574390090734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839275581344173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13070111052737954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072431255877674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998998061073837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799066435138042,0.062218333962762565,0.0,0.0,0.112703562294475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082711247896464,0.0,0.0,0.08500924076143139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283420579899592,0.0,0.0,0.14915451258567186,0.10165209827540167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363574589821212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431460532519968,0.17658132822204595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158571220127482,0.1309402861480476,0.0,0.13672966147462526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18028248147684334,0.0,0.0,0.10647296623558117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538233942763058,0.0816027794775436,0.0,0.0,0.1485213341443166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17292890761470342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31523914857851826,0.07511620888037797,0.0,0.2043100884300979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392407169686204,0.15474806084169568,0.0
mentalhealth,samiver,2020/02/14,"There’s Definitely Something Wrong with Me TRIGGERS: ED, sexual assault 


Okay, okay... I (21F) know most people on Reddit aren’t mental healthcare professionals, so I’ll take everything with a grain of salt, but I’ve been to a few psychiatrists and everyone says something different. 

Here’s the deal. When I was 13, I was raped by three guys. For a year or two I was completely okay, like nothing happened, and then I was depressed for a few years, then I went to college and things were mostly fine. 

Here’s where the “mostly” comes in. I’m generally very high functioning, do well in school, have a job, etc., but whenever anything happens to upset the apple cart I lose my mind. And the symptoms are always similar every time. Immediately after the thing happens (in this case, I broke up with a guy I’d been dating a few months because I was tired of him), I feel 100% okay. Then my appetite disappears, and I realize this would be a good time to begin losing weight, so I become fixated on my body. Absolutely fixated. 

On top of that, I don’t require very much sleep and I’m extremely energetic. In the last week and a half, I’ve exercised for at least 1 hour a day, and consumed less than 1000 calories total in the entire 9 days. I haven’t consumed a single calorie in 3 days, and yet I still have energy to run and do gymnastics. 

I’ve lost 50 pounds in the last year though this radical weight loss, and I was at a healthy weight to begin with. I can’t help but think there’s gotta be a word for this, but I don’t think anorexia fits because I’m not underweight and it’s not sustained for more than a few weeks. 

Wtf is wrong with me?",3.948956410256411,5.244223581538464,5.085711538461542,82.71974679487181,71.64615384615384,8.493589743589743,28.003205128205128,8.959647251330699,2.147351282051281,1284,47,259,25,24,424,182,325,0.155,0.732,0.114,-0.9563,3,0,2,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,0,6,12,19,2,1,22,4,23,9,2,1,1,40,40,24,0,1,7,0,4,1,0,2,3,1,0,2,8,18,3,1,5,1,0,4,7,11,1,3,11,6,24,8,36,25,14,45,0,6,0,1,6,17,0,4,25,164,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695683821820194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859990137180725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741100512552025,0.11541796877342815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608190518863815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002212129632685,0.10957189041775688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021919512181472,0.10774044595413383,0.0900103206271476,0.0,0.0,0.10918586709254924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165511104574457,0.0,0.0,0.08805028011495082,0.09985935793816224,0.09392268652845988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052841054273039416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765414474885744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20695348995538326,0.2772412562944453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004774552678017,0.11041565940526944,0.0,0.0,0.1029167368219561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037054526450897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05743341739399191,0.17037164670288182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051056044206045474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23382955149271,0.11407995461693107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053168313724366,0.0,0.10552063090237827,0.0,0.08341518797807017,0.0,0.07682347027948111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027571945776266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07245086396127846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310686345073831,0.0,0.10576501204613664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458084087778992,0.0,0.0,0.1609066764532739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345812215986946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862109210713816,0.07857503114608137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885744617179474,0.13392564059446435,0.10267599380171888,0.0,0.12187584139027932,0.12011354755827795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208655965459304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17245574715360354,0.0,0.0,0.16765580564839958,0.3817781542226032,0.09396287673737252,0.0968775234554806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423761527076124,0.22852042952760865,0.0,0.20189409262406996
mentalhealth,vulsoven,2020/02/14,"I'm pushing everyone away and I don't know how to stop (17M) I have been in a deep depressive episode for about nine months now. I've been on antidepressants for a few weeks now and am going to talk to my mom about seeing a therapist because I honestly don't have any qualified adults that I trust in our community (I live in a small town in a flyover state). I'm a very joking person about this sort of thing, making suicidal jokes and such, but I feel as if I'm starting to make my friends uncomfortable and concerned about me all of the time. I keep trying to reassure them that I don't have the courage to actually kill myself but the jokes persist and I just can't stop. It's too ingrained into my humor. It makes it seem that I'm blaming my friends for my suicidal thoughts. How do I stop this before I lose everyone?",4.450812264658417,4.992584301775147,5.553297471759013,82.6125067240452,69.88757396449705,9.222377622377623,30.748251748251747,9.339509955726095,2.5074686390532555,653,26,138,13,11,217,99,169,0.212,0.659,0.129,-0.9609,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,1,0,1,2,12,13,1,0,9,0,11,0,0,5,1,25,26,11,3,1,4,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,9,6,0,4,4,3,0,2,4,3,0,1,3,2,20,10,23,23,2,22,0,2,1,0,9,10,0,3,9,90,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.1540758404981701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736920411716336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834090414675272,0.0,0.0,0.09624701443256332,0.0,0.13435099631791458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598863959900578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017373595077527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798328795575981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24396764046076586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08973134706626634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403380434407375,0.17467959744994,0.0,0.08677107518907347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394179315968776,0.0,0.0,0.17663620340415054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31617425055027715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849164310866409,0.12602463646387502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786164725664898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581623547221849,0.1437352382818159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175388690634816,0.0,0.0,0.39600412851438105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34540753033153304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12690433450169358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18332005168864532,0.10489372258384844,0.0,0.0,0.12534537725942704,0.09206571954844008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071955379474527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13027407458970544,0.0,0.0,0.12664817085500293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i_like_cheeseburger,2020/02/14,"idk to cancel my counseling appointment or keep going. I'm kind of at the juncture where I feel it's nice to go for counseling to have someone to vent out my shit with. But at the same time nothing concrete really comes out from it other than possibly better coping mechanisms. 

I usually get generic advice or just questioning me why do i still choose to stay in a particular situation etc. Better example: If i say i'm lonely, then the counsellor say go make new friends, ask them to study with me etc. Well duh i know that but it takes time to develop friendships, and this is pretty much my last semester of college lol so it's pretty much just more so of a temporary friendship anyways. 

Even though I'm going to a subsidized place, it's still pretty pricey if I sum up the total cost.

The only plus point for me to go is because I told my SO that I want to change my behavior and be a less shitty person overall in terms of behavior. I know I should be doing it for myself but whenever I think about the short term stuff like cost, time taken, and not much 'results' seen i feel like just saying f it and stop going for it.",3.839247058823528,5.2479225822222215,5.200209150326798,81.35317647058824,72.06666666666666,8.6718954248366,27.013071895424837,9.168548406835145,2.2446522875816988,891,31,173,19,17,298,133,225,0.064,0.7559999999999999,0.18,0.9832,0,2,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,2,14,10,1,0,10,2,8,1,1,2,1,36,32,17,0,4,11,0,2,2,1,1,0,3,0,1,13,10,0,2,7,0,2,7,1,2,1,0,3,6,22,8,31,26,11,31,0,1,1,0,9,11,1,5,14,119,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093286025309952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061282007602452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920225428315542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200802828556898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009173850284614,0.09778957042086256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532151622197591,0.07498053188345745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480076060275753,0.0811004872615785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770719170648521,0.0,0.059310813891577975,0.0,0.3871046722930204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090400232197397,0.0,0.11821620070408607,0.12477797976506312,0.09253597839650984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092270562838813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577714146377272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503562696153737,0.0,0.0,0.10964072516671793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892788781481033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633896673993485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912345671806637,0.11860683668921106,0.0,0.1073154437481167,0.1279795468138001,0.0,0.34647954347647825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12717116607140175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07272541196137314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708329139163905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652920135086375,0.0,0.12760403158277805,0.0,0.0,0.09618723468167496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209998662944236,0.1813184092225676,0.0949098821755584,0.0,0.0,0.1299560873830829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535478203505424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274062571221522,0.11153526690794524,0.0,0.1985876249517388,0.0,0.0,0.10847560104845567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502898088762565,0.0,0.0669585039881123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207034914684952,0.0,0.10243638705482357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LostHope1408,2020/02/14,"I'm struggling I'm most likely depressed, definitely anxious, probably have some sort of sleeping disorder and just overall feel like shit. Occasionally I'll have a day or so where I'll be super productive and can think straight. Most of them everything is a fog, can't concentrate and I struggle to get anything done.

I work as a software developer in a company that prefers people to be there at 9am. I usually get there at 10am. Sometimes 11am. I struggle to wake up in the morning and get out of bed. It's like my brain physically hurts and my body is just numb. I've been there for 3/4 months and already had people coming talk to me about that. I panicked, I cried, I feel like I'm failing.

I want to be better. I want to wake up feeling rested and calm. I want to tackle the day like every other normal person. I want to feel normal.

Right now, my main struggle is waking up early. But I need to change that. I need to get motivated enough. I need to be calm.

I take xanax and one other anti depressant/stuff for anxiety. This isn't working for me though. I still need to be better. I'm constantly stressed because I'm scared I'll get fired. Where should I start fixing this? I feel like I'm trying so hard just to come to work everyday and do something that I don't have the energy to do more. 

Please roast me, call me lazy because that might very well be the problem. Give me advice if you have any. Please, I just need someone to give me some pointers or some reality checks. I'm lost.",1.781894894253366,4.058464529801326,3.408692587054052,87.97541230506306,80.8543046357616,6.280880153813289,23.980346079897465,7.4822170145007005,1.1552092287972655,1176,43,240,18,31,389,156,302,0.165,0.665,0.17,-0.5607,0,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,1,9,16,25,1,6,8,0,24,9,7,1,0,48,58,17,0,15,8,0,7,6,0,2,2,0,1,1,10,12,0,0,8,0,1,2,3,13,1,1,4,7,31,12,32,46,9,24,0,4,0,0,7,12,1,10,16,143,41,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468630340058954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563502711737286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05893396684975945,0.0,0.06629713221348657,0.0979047799346145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131645245968025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565819882146783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329316510966726,0.0,0.09626330948345407,0.0,0.09674482370001483,0.08849284531933226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167820409166932,0.14930539447337646,0.0,0.09365216179386764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951954865680021,0.11178122518203357,0.0,0.07464291128884848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932356743972096,0.0,0.0,0.0886865710756589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954628106668668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301750734566635,0.0,0.0778873212505778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190976600811104,0.1857366822012809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263897986898671,0.16627053027594152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763322989661522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277477798715593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540356540368973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460315076068286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193598963326777,0.0,0.0,0.06917376177540037,0.0,0.0,0.3212984272868103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16982312619187528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05872524615580815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016274075644327,0.07567098793440541,0.0,0.19026039973349199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934376175166728,0.0829250050728733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400992319347628,0.0,0.0,0.08676500975189634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889585581595234,0.0,0.0,0.08672581514835373,0.0,0.07342947185289432,0.06671758689782249,0.08571214846651827,0.0,0.061340678832671684,0.0,0.06920936582947965,0.0,0.09927243487127303,0.3623968900453501,0.09920866206611476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515996208535359,0.0696566199229007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553029719560725,0.08514618149826415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05883864308934965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954473019550592,0.07150623920872952,0.2044648689684688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792064980865475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18927558641754008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jassyladd311,2020/02/14,"Hey everyone This holiday is hard on a lot of people who have gone through abuse, lost a loved one, have no one, or are surrounded by less than loving people. I'm here to say happy valentine's day to those that havent gotten that loving message yet. I cant say things will get better because I cant promise that nor can I say that you should hang in there because I dont understand your level of trauma. But from someone that loves everyone and tries to see the best in everyone: I say happy valentine's day. Comment ""hey"" if you want a direct message so it feels a little more personal or if you want to vent about your day. I work tonight so I probably wont be able to message everyone if it happens to get large but i want to help at least a few of you on this hard holiday.",3.8212874082439328,4.564963596273294,5.0697346132128756,84.78405985319031,71.4223602484472,8.339017504234898,28.92207792207793,8.575989854853784,2.027168944099379,613,23,128,10,11,204,94,161,0.07400000000000001,0.733,0.193,0.9541,0,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,6,0,4,6,11,0,0,6,0,13,4,0,0,0,15,30,11,0,7,7,0,3,0,0,3,0,4,0,1,12,1,0,0,2,2,0,2,7,2,0,2,3,8,14,9,20,23,6,15,0,1,1,4,23,8,0,6,5,88,26,1,0.11579798724260244,0.13720167945548267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411787564500626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152284344303295,0.10241390949246308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22404036612903366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571437862992258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44259975689612135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05855094169007335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12099933789717973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239977768990766,0.24653822134914724,0.20746450305338832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761694993190549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606000443987036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640718211767693,0.09844730777844976,0.4180488181668795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15693542606210475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16055948805535625,0.101110335923656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484981566787977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3683488289847987,0.0,0.0,0.09227600341640538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811525881198513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693103729561149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861923215821158,0.0,0.0,0.12054978855490868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20490195929424893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430231385998638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,turtlenina,2020/02/14,"I don’t know what happened I’ve been doing good for so long and I am sure that I don’t have any kind of mental illness like depression or anxiety but once in a while specially for the past 2 years I experienced “gloomy” days that usually last for a week or two, people told me that I should just try to socialize, exercise and have some sunlight so I did. I’ve been doing those and they were effective but idk what happened this week... I was talking to my room mates and I even have a fairly active week but at the end of the day (i think it was tuesday) hit by this heavy feeling and I feel like it’s eating my whole existence. My body feels so heavy, I want to cry for some unknown reason at the same time i feel lost and even though I had a heart to heart talk with my mom and I spent my whole with my friends today that “gloomy” feeling is still trying to creep out.",2.7553354380426214,4.033210425414366,3.7294909234412015,91.3511740331492,74.58011049723756,7.160378847671666,23.425808997632203,7.7094869923839395,0.8461599052880819,681,19,153,9,14,219,108,181,0.098,0.7609999999999999,0.14,0.8302,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,2,8,9,0,0,8,0,17,6,3,2,1,31,31,17,0,2,6,1,5,2,2,1,2,0,1,0,11,10,1,0,9,1,1,0,2,2,0,1,10,6,22,7,18,19,5,21,0,2,0,0,8,5,0,4,18,103,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664766704954062,0.0,0.0974733612115066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153113450640326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399611678234914,0.16434635066487308,0.0,0.10974374322116312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037900605713365,0.0,0.0,0.11285330104584147,0.0,0.0,0.1683149441468418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221283432428403,0.09102645473981934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844176016448318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687101086370293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22534818251285274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019786029476168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13268479643280565,0.0700248390060631,0.10386154675183217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449864340438062,0.0,0.0,0.1127596941192688,0.0,0.0,0.13909028607977714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840597854194627,0.0,0.0,0.1492287987466167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13569453583811938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216335758729902,0.08833463713182121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100550074331752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298851923617146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175507279851607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008865109685067,0.0,0.0,0.2048252962934747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164342160834293,0.12518617665444765,0.0,0.07429765247588736,0.0,0.1207760519557208,0.12175203531594375,0.0,0.1730150345741925,0.0,0.12446751784691025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033139940609132,0.0,0.07515362038530479,0.0,0.30661776710301875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845121991903423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205212211380976
mentalhealth,Mr_Middi,2020/02/14,"Randomly my brain will feel “switched on” and my motivation will be at 100% almost like I’m on a drug To cut it short I basically have serve depression I don’t go out much, I work from home and my hobby is building up my youtube I’m never normally in the mood to upload anything as my procrastination is insane and I just mentally can’t do some tasks but randomly for a few days each month or two months I will have a switch in my brain which feels like I’m just switched on and I get so much done I’m extremely more motivated and have energy to do stuff and wanting to go out etc then it dies down and I go back to normal? What is this? What causes these random extreme bursts of motivation and energy? I want it to stay forever but it never does",1.117984819734346,3.4113768516129066,3.3439468690702117,87.32768500948771,83.70967741935483,7.259962049335862,21.37571157495256,8.313332769828598,1.2866963946869077,592,19,128,14,17,202,93,155,0.037000000000000005,0.8240000000000001,0.139,0.9394,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,4,4,5,1,0,4,0,15,3,2,4,2,33,27,14,1,4,5,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,10,11,0,0,5,0,0,3,4,2,0,1,1,2,14,2,20,22,7,22,0,1,0,0,0,11,0,6,9,89,24,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057405682069106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13195988870047434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12330439274361835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35802218779793205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647304880521228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341679602026817,0.0,0.13811497804836248,0.0,0.16642492225259312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14032921590264594,0.1641005636811106,0.0,0.0,0.18596284503270816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17884009244921306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621623165015593,0.11455884799622895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377974957441285,0.0,0.2734031989771735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608508300087247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566843529857929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16160182245523602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559903525777783,0.0,0.2357612290973083,0.0,0.2473539227094828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142310092291282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17091889035978536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18357003963102306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664518076913084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18916505533902145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674157671399678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AreaCodeUnknown,2020/02/14,"I just wanna give up I have a good job and a bright future woth this career but I have a drinking problem and I don’t know what to do it’s cost me the girl I love, ruined new relationships and everything, I drink to mask the pain of not wanting to be here because I feel like what’s the point, it’s a cycle of just not wanting to live then drinking to hide the pain then make new problems when I’m drunk then drink again to numb those problems, I feel liek what’s the point in even living anymore, getting out of bed is a dread and I have no motivation to do anything I just want to die, how do I stop feeling this way I just want to be normal like everyone else and be happy.",1.3952679045092822,3.0789631793103465,3.0013793103448267,93.41039787798412,79.27586206896551,5.564986737400532,22.188328912466847,6.297961479604792,0.22612997347480146,531,16,121,4,13,175,81,145,0.268,0.5660000000000001,0.166,-0.9678,1,0,4,0,0,2,7.0,0,0,0,1,9,14,0,1,10,0,11,9,0,3,0,30,24,11,1,9,7,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,1,1,8,6,5,1,5,5,1,0,4,8,0,0,0,4,13,6,16,21,0,15,0,1,1,1,4,5,0,0,11,79,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12508197670860505,0.0,0.0,0.10379001851410476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688454791022477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089769877733304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4942174113449606,0.0,0.0,0.10536114188984436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330428474684884,0.0,0.0,0.12051771480991318,0.11335289734415567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913175662438224,0.09010362975882363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589503708337179,0.12099046447554715,0.0,0.10578755398458814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13426226556772947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125159468518248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931492812455396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12323647782227565,0.0,0.22274113549600102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138326161717301,0.0,0.08418932769924875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436243638104773,0.0,0.0,0.12357559022963847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26841150063286745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384575318196669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3620533908355179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13541090560259636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054460358100892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975668559470088,0.10011204832093576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throooooutaway,2020/02/14,"I came to vent, ended up telling my entire story Hi.   
 

I'm here to vent. I don't think I need any advice unless you see something I'm not seeing.   
 

I'm 30 year old single male. I'm not a wizard thankfully, but my love  life have never been rich. I forced myself into a relationship with  married woman, it lasted over a year until I saw an opening and left it  behind.   
 

I know I have problems with finding love. I was only once deeply in  love. I fell in love at the first sight, it was mutual but she got over  it within few days but I didin't. It was six years ago and at this point  I don't know if I still love her, or just an image of her. Or maybe I  don't love her at I'm just using it as an excuse to not go and look for  love anymore.   
 

Dating requires effort, sacrifices, balls. it's stressfull, even  though I'm pretty tough and the level of stress I feel when dating is  probably way lower than averege person's.   
 

Ever since I got a cat in 2015 to be able to show affection to  something and have something to hug my need for love have been greatly  reduced. I want it, but I don't think I need it. I want to be in a  relationship, to date together, have activities and someone to motivate  me to keep going. Someone to cook for, someone to have sex with. That  would be nice, but it's not that important to me anymore. Once or twice a  year I feel like I have to hook up with a girl to not go crazy, then I  get on tinder and usually have no matches or like 1. Sometimes a  conversation with the girl is enough. It's almost like... what I really  need is attention and not sex. A validation that I'm atractive for at  least one girl. Somehow my urge for hookup evaporates after a  conversation like that. Besides, to be honest, masturbation has been  more pleasureable for me than actual sex act. I worry too much, can't  chill out and enjoy it, I feel like I'm constantly judged and I'm  worried if she's having fun. This doesn't happen when I'm going down on a  girl cause that's what I know is my secret weapon. It's the only thing  in the world that I know for sure I'm good at. But as I said, I'm rarely  doing that and I haven't since I broke up with the wife, and that was  over a year ago... ok actually right after the breakup I hooked up with a  girl from tinder, like three weeks later.

So that's where I'm at if we talk about love life. But I didin't even  wanted to tell you that, it just sort of happened once I started  writing. I wanted to talk about a place I'm at right now. So I have a  pretty good job, twice the money I ever had, working 8-4. small trading  company. I have almost no supervision over what I'm doing. That is not  good for me. I like freedom and I hate when people tell me how to do my  job, but 0 supervision is very bad. My division is probably going to be  closed within few months If my score won't improve, I should work on  that looking for new clients, making calls and meeting people. But I  spend my days on reddit and 9gag and work for maybe 30 minutes a day  with the clients I have, who are not enough. I have no will. I'm lazy, I  don't want to do it, I hate to do this part of work. I'm fine with  selling and buying stuff bur with clients we have some kind of  relations, but if it comes to strangers and just calling them asking to  work together, no. i hate it. so i avoid it. I know it's bad but I can't  help it.

I live alone. with my cat. I have no friends, because I don't like  anyone enough to want to spend time with them irl. There's this one  succesfull guy, we worked together in previous company. He is calling me  and trying to get me to go drink a beer with him every week for months.  I always find an excuse. He will probably get tired of me, too. The  only relation I have is with my sister, we meet once a week or once  every two weeks, but she has a 6 year old kid who is very envious of her  mom and we can't talk or do basicly anything until she falls asleep.  then we usually watch a movie.

It got worse recently. I'm trying to lose weight, I' a bit obesse,  not too much but still. Recently... I don't want to speak to anyone. I  come back from work, cook dinner, feed the cat. I put on some random  netflix show and sail the seas in sea of thieves untill 11 pm. that's  all I do. I offen just take my trousers and socks off and go to bed like  this, in the morning put trousers back on and go to work like this. I  don't like to smell bad so before I leave for work I make sure I don't. I  take a full shower or a bath like once a week. It weirds me out when I  write it. you must feel disgusted. As I said, I make sure I don't smell.  I also make sure my hair doesn't look too dirty so no one would know.

Is this hygiene system in place because I don't like to feel cold  when I exit the shower? I don't have a proper warm robe to fight it, I  just but some t shirt on after I'm done, and most of the times If i  shower at evening, I will go to work the next day in that same shirt and  underwear I'd wear to bed.   
 

I don't feel like doing anything. I have cinema subscription so i can  go to any movie for free and I don't do that anymore. I didin't go for  almost two months. I just sit in my apartment. I need to go to the gym  to strenghten my back, cause I have some spine problems and whenever I'm  not sitting or laying down I'm in pain. Guess what, it's been 7 years  and I'm still too lazy to do that.   
 

Sometimes I feel like I'm missing out on life. I probably am. I used  to think I'm creative, I had high hopes and dreams of becoming a movie  director or an actor. I thought I' special and unique. I wrote original  short storries and I thought I'm amazing. Now I see every day people  more interesting than me, just random people making videos on their  cellphones, getting thousands of karma. and I think that I should be  this guy. But I'm not, I didin't come up with this simple and brilliant  idea for a video. I'm not that special, but I still want to be.   
 

I was once in local tv show. It's pretty bad, but it's on tv and  everything. I went through the audition, spoke with director, she was  very surprised I'm not expirienced actor. I made good impression on her.  After the show I got plenty of propositions to keep on apearing in this  show, but I didin't. It was too far from my apartment, I had no car and  the show was very cringey. I should have do that and try to climb the  ladder of fame. I thought I'm cool for refusing this offer and hoped  they will call me for a bigger production. they didin't. 

That's about it. I think I'm at the lowest point right now because  I'm trying to lose weight and it took the only pleasure I looked forward to everyday - eating. I love to cook and eat and now I can't eat as much as I  want and whatever I want.",1.259718308303885,2.9478461173144908,3.0898086903710262,92.59979254085691,79.69964664310953,6.117988074204947,21.231365945229683,7.04035,0.39144975706713797,5156,144,1178,60,128,1723,467,1415,0.10300000000000001,0.7140000000000001,0.183,0.9991,7,2,5,0,1,0,164.0,6,3,5,17,51,80,7,2,56,2,102,37,6,14,9,224,241,100,0,31,55,3,11,15,1,11,5,4,6,11,69,74,12,5,27,23,9,26,43,22,0,11,32,29,164,59,174,191,22,177,2,4,10,14,87,77,0,30,87,743,233,19,0.033587698617592414,0.0,0.06555349753399227,0.0,0.0,0.032821510359695744,0.05954693651745303,0.0,0.10089968529751672,0.0347867262479193,0.0,0.02686007044958737,0.027947655904273883,0.0,0.0,0.045681573662450826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099929915234407,0.04697059965262384,0.0,0.05527962820976905,0.0,0.03139996420141825,0.0,0.0,0.07748060097606843,0.11217730154632458,0.06142424798261046,0.0370949742716703,0.02858065767267522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03666906775273728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371871824735804,0.03841537935351762,0.0,0.06900763727532924,0.0,0.08679848490291298,0.0,0.036296369957080105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830643483684216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034371877085679584,0.0,0.032903157674828806,0.0,0.103105802591848,0.0,0.0,0.02974873161806425,0.1041152136892785,0.0,0.06655307449136925,0.0607639926632961,0.08489725413265348,0.0,0.030186457770182876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11888064732935412,0.09598023441419012,0.0,0.0,0.0613970960880277,0.028569679285840314,0.0,0.0,0.025949772634063072,0.0,0.07019274498621869,0.0,0.2290639578383539,0.11268707217147655,0.10745260351660116,0.03703055630088812,0.03700063673790283,0.06651420456374144,0.059402981924917685,0.0,0.0,0.0994826961064493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022513126385071452,0.03548724768210392,0.0,0.06672032666873504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037916423430534835,0.0,0.0,0.06666121642208593,0.059708579585694,0.0,0.034976419495905166,0.11075352459614862,0.02737845726375535,0.0,0.035564523155202074,0.03649313282429395,0.0,0.07117195451958579,0.2461387944654952,0.0,0.0296585532344987,0.0,0.11282083024288204,0.07515208670502277,0.0,0.0,0.30314209353683824,0.03178149254854338,0.11210024819998524,0.0,0.06748671550981067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03933750667865652,0.08042814177367752,0.0,0.07407246940219574,0.12452426468380462,0.02590490378982679,0.03243920862306838,0.035720898523942536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048927928021878,0.2503886199068641,0.0682796815192593,0.10217983327337928,0.035739679437947834,0.0,0.0,0.03637220450551628,0.0,0.09314192454312706,0.02932748289495193,0.0701839925562888,0.0,0.0635024633944881,0.0,0.0,0.10251229346913143,0.14485287977689273,0.06427778291851115,0.0,0.06752982819057518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021517139796606445,0.0,0.06632760066943852,0.07212123693997036,0.0,0.08605113329806972,0.0638991857818423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029514155266496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05556818276434596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537624412745289,0.07757235402692772,0.06643818553605743,0.0,0.02377354595646795,0.0,0.10729271801203336,0.0,0.03847459528546415,0.0,0.038449879130653765,0.0,0.0,0.12662403381198073,0.0,0.050507538639522835,0.08098955960822914,0.0880713870885566,0.030923040237453424,0.0,0.0,0.022314174508148286,0.107608205311623,0.032999743357724085,0.07999464276007731,0.03917051433807086,0.038604118610854894,0.0,0.0,0.03731716901585085,0.09121537042761448,0.0,0.06562060213179377,0.0,0.0,0.05801797500623776,0.07398420958591932,0.110853475791499,0.19810894871920087,0.026660351783961218,0.13471012926141832,0.0818015366750743,0.0,0.03113613311926118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445224462116713,0.06821987666370892,0.034228734368697014,0.04771947483957184,0.0,0.0,0.15140563685641656
mentalhealth,Burrows94,2020/02/14,"I think I need help with the way I think So I'm incredibly bitter towards women. I've been single my entire life when objectively Im not that bad looking but I think the personality detracts hard. Here's what happened today and at previous jobs;

- Today, a girl at work in my department who is quiet, pretty and always polite left a knitted heart on my desk. I rarely speak to her but I thought it was really nice and made me feel good. Looked around 5 minutes later and everyone in our booth has one. I'm seething, and now I get a huge feeling a hate every time I look at her. Which I guess is the opposite effect that was intended.

- at my previous job, I thought I was getting along fine with a girl from work. We were abit flirty for a few weeks. Following that, she kissed another colleuge on a night out. From that, I made a point of not talking to her or looking at her for the 6 months following until I quit. Even when it was well passed and those colleagues weren't seeing each other anymore I just felt hate, lots of hate.

I'll add more later - my 10 min break is about to end - help.",2.9644747474747497,4.6029310636363645,4.194848484848485,86.75671717171717,74.72727272727272,7.2525252525252535,24.949494949494948,7.984000788550335,1.3318282828282832,854,28,177,13,18,280,140,220,0.084,0.763,0.153,0.9107,2,1,0,0,0,0,25.0,2,0,0,4,10,10,4,0,12,0,11,3,1,4,0,35,38,13,0,1,6,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,11,14,0,0,9,0,0,4,3,5,1,1,12,12,27,5,26,26,5,35,0,0,5,1,16,15,0,3,14,112,38,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917995652013724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498656202686301,0.0,0.0,0.11820961159147808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610900055285223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952301481042457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557156988460148,0.0,0.0,0.07872730670679783,0.0,0.10042709845858633,0.1138961234260082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053735100458735,0.0,0.11444608614022035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12454914679799026,0.0,0.0,0.09997528018655297,0.0,0.0,0.13130695309302864,0.0,0.10540392340344486,0.0,0.10677548859038356,0.35304175449057285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14124688816939748,0.15978806263048945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875127206535508,0.0,0.23656569155450666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295059356389018,0.0,0.08419109613204014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4003757981127737,0.0,0.0,0.10133549820565473,0.0,0.2255707641389393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514047297837852,0.0,0.0,0.08838173190155199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185662249090897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807697536123039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407665273714743,0.0,0.0,0.11267799310180775,0.0,0.0,0.12126437179409615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12677876926186188,0.0,0.0,0.07635949851303238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498314366982663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958045882636482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22912641748357876,0.0,0.1892553521712972,0.06950368077787837,0.0,0.2259662285687208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461160319855227,0.0956112012308437,0.0,0.10717080128804528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17355105320129888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leelbeach,2020/02/14,I am sad all the time. I am currently on a skiing holiday but I still fell miserable. What's wrong with me? More info about my problems can be seen on my other posts.,-0.5702857142857134,1.6438925428571451,2.3114285714285714,90.95857142857146,95.0,6.2285714285714295,18.42857142857143,7.554174236665415,0.8202571428571424,129,4,28,3,5,45,30,35,0.344,0.611,0.045,-0.9217,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,5,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,1,6,0,4,3,2,7,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4785028690096805,0.0,0.0,0.4780738770812539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3990013606071852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913354942657088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5462617654719877,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JapanXi,2020/02/14,"Spirituality & Caring about Other People's Ideas People love to share their ideas. Especially here on Reddit, it seems people often define themselves by their unique thoughts and perspectives, but left unchecked, this very tendency often leads to the emergence of so many unhealthy attitudes and behaviors. My question is, have you ever found yourself personally challenged (if not threatened) by the thoughts, beliefs, and attitudes of others? And if so, has your spirituality been helpful in re-establishing your inner consciousness? If being overly outwardly focused led to negativity, has anyone found having a strong inward focus emotionally helpful and liberating? Thanks.",12.688782051282056,14.266047750000002,11.139230769230773,46.07243589743592,52.269230769230774,12.702564102564105,45.21794871794872,12.161744961471696,6.544094871794871,562,29,60,15,6,176,80,104,0.087,0.7090000000000001,0.204,0.9309,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,3,2,3,7,6,0,0,3,0,7,1,0,2,1,25,15,11,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,10,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,5,0,6,6,11,9,0,9,1,0,0,1,11,6,0,7,1,48,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19544434463690166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612762600188945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18391196296971027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029060142133308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16316628268955136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3955601635604005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418131517016681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4072597334625367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19598609524001276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628022332344581,0.0,0.0,0.18287952530243592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751635036838035,0.15750302621246928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20206966308877325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16421343755316628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607195491459012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2864070846817947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883443940510407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,avacado_monster,2020/02/14,"Social Media and Mental Health How do you take care of your mental health whilst scrolling through Instagram, twitter or snapchat?

Read up on this and more on **Liberate's new magazine** ( r/LiberateMyOCDFighter ) which is going to be released today (Feb 14) at 9PM IST (10.30 AM EST)!!",2.4553061224489774,4.920297489795921,2.9373265306122462,82.73088775510206,104.71428571428572,5.2253061224489805,23.26734693877551,6.742157984588678,1.4369330612244906,223,9,37,4,10,69,45,49,0.0,0.924,0.076,0.5837,0,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,4,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,6,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,3,20,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688606574223764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986730689259414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5606034825248973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5314969980798959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546839867752744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26377227605095244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26880987403841944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19827026997465566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24995763352808986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,intothettrash876,2020/02/14,"I feel my mental health slipping away Been struggling in and off with depression but it was always manageable or rather I knew when I entered the realm and prepared everything for it. 

Right now everything that formerly helped fails and I can feel myself drifting away.

I don't want to talk to my parents, friends or anybody actually because I can't stand their platitudes (I had it even worse!) if we are to talk about anything serious, I know I'm in a bad mood and don't want to spoil theirs.
It's getting harder to keep my apartment tidy, to go to the gym, to keep up with studies, I can't sleep even though my body feels beyond exhausted (because I force myself to the gym and outside to tire myself) still, my mind is absolutely awake. Slept around 6 hours in the last 3 days. 

I have to drag myself to work, a job that I hate, and recently got forced to work extra shifts that make seeing my s.o. (we can only meet at the weekend) harder, we've got only a day left to do something which I need right now to .. lay around and recover because I feel everything is just too much for me.

The usual stuff (sport, meditation, being in nature, reading a book, writing stuff down) isn't working, I don't feel much joy in anything and I'm on the edge of crying all the time.

I've already contacted some therapists but they are booked until the end of march.. I can't even take a day off work.

I just want to cry and sleep. Help please, any advice would be appreciated.",4.868584957202696,5.590305955017303,5.4085412493170635,83.37763066836645,69.03460207612457,8.437151702786378,29.051356765616465,8.532816995589336,1.9878539792387544,1147,40,231,17,19,369,164,289,0.153,0.789,0.059000000000000004,-0.9777,2,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,2,0,3,5,16,10,1,1,14,0,21,7,4,1,1,43,45,17,0,7,8,1,5,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,10,15,0,3,7,7,0,3,7,7,0,0,7,6,33,2,40,35,5,41,0,2,1,0,14,20,0,4,17,149,43,10,0.0,0.0,0.0930034470510548,0.0,0.0,0.09313045728157378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051708889151329,0.0,0.07930098114891351,0.0,0.0,0.06481033014480356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685497093555756,0.16968242672829406,0.0,0.0,0.17908343553033496,0.0,0.07957527910149963,0.17429022126361174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586181792850964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20937504269806712,0.18439056019697905,0.0,0.08208562875009151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084411501749148,0.0,0.0,0.18884317610462692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569606259771868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409441013874102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363202257537932,0.0,0.049792669249332205,0.0,0.054163745326422125,0.0,0.15244743450144926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409346572275727,0.0,0.10130423000910137,0.0,0.0,0.12776119880541684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385573778736216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457501346370656,0.16942204242000247,0.0,0.0,0.05237686239982532,0.07768589003657286,0.0,0.0,0.10354862132539627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361649577871115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604452312734506,0.0,0.09623037973176196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011955110741425,0.07066708134733113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144966738175924,0.0,0.0,0.10582437201175164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10461572484714088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533029371398216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941016990540421,0.0,0.0,0.16277904958913622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594534974509831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19074666146845168,0.0,0.0,0.07337006253686698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611029917527723,0.0,0.0,0.09963295932193422,0.2182017089777961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165712543566692,0.1532042988208496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106558735327752,0.0,0.0,0.0936361902727474,0.0,0.055572822095637374,0.10953850629603863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496444549385343,0.0,0.1686391953044972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775312529098746,0.0,0.0971234306097248,0.06770158448441184,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anapple77,2020/02/14,Are there any mental health professions around here? I’ve been feeling very depressed lately... am I having depression? I am seeing a psychiatrist currently but I feel that it is not helping... I’m still not any better and it has been like this for years.,2.170121580547111,5.063428808510636,3.0966565349544086,84.82000000000002,90.70212765957449,6.089969604863223,21.60790273556231,7.447530270364453,1.3910328267477206,202,7,35,4,7,64,38,47,0.16699999999999998,0.741,0.09300000000000001,-0.5597,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,0,0,7,12,2,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,3,3,2,2,10,0,5,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,5,25,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3649484587708449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23887141130368414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373168960842913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4622260623059576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27135235464716084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852232238763948,0.0,0.0,0.17985656179569262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026889692907483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109293526481222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27041445870119313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21382500504442087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142894220608473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214011137096205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17279631710794452
mentalhealth,skidskywood,2020/02/14,"I'm spiralling hard I used to be a fun outgoing social person up until 3 years ago when my grandad died, I loved him more than anyone in the world and I completely crashed I locked myself away and I lost all my friends I used to play rugby but my grandad came to every match home or away I couldn't bring myself to play without him being there. I just feel so empty and I have absolutely no purpose, I've turned into my worst fear, the only bit of happiness I get in my life is through video games, I always feel like a burden to people and even when I got a little bit better, last year my grandma died and I've gone back to this dark pit that I keep digging deeper, I have absolutely no social life because I just don't want to leave the house unless it's for work. The only way I talk to people is through social media like I've downloaded dating apps just to be able to talk to people, I don't consider myself terrible looking so I get a few matches but because I'm so boring and I don't know how to talk to people any more they quickly lose interest in me. I just don't know what I'm doing any more and I guess I'm writing this post because I just need even an ounce of hope because I'm just spiralling further and further and I don't know when it's going to end, I can never sleep I probably get 3-4 hours of sleep a night, I've tried bettering myself by dieting or working out but I just can't do it, I'm sorry to burden you all I really am I don't want to put my problems on any of you people's shoulders but I can't do this any more",3.365749385749389,3.7509628408408417,5.05432295932296,85.78510442260442,72.24324324324324,7.616107016107018,26.24747474747475,7.520522993642371,1.2500642642642648,1218,37,265,13,22,416,160,333,0.157,0.7240000000000001,0.12,-0.9266,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,1,6,19,21,0,1,10,0,21,7,3,3,3,47,52,24,2,6,15,0,3,2,1,0,2,0,1,1,8,12,1,1,5,4,0,5,13,9,0,0,4,4,46,12,37,44,10,35,0,2,1,1,16,13,0,4,17,167,54,2,0.09164207491846436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123517004882297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625354762572052,0.0,0.0,0.24927901394083354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407826956736427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17220149211706368,0.0704670988846042,0.0,0.2234566331172356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16209993610231252,0.20009882144330576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481411997940096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608497198857124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19022001069532865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116767756883465,0.0,0.0,0.12105745237330555,0.0,0.07721240060908767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10312281229668052,0.09267397323006786,0.06546911663270333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708024397540098,0.0,0.14363760527322514,0.0,0.05208230306860855,0.0,0.07329453897516144,0.0,0.10095407734157023,0.0,0.0,0.09755469282816412,0.08209329878898723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09192447318128567,0.09102125818108396,0.09024898390445464,0.10574265035540413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145568688652663,0.0,0.0,0.15109226318364194,0.0747005223633536,0.0,0.09703572526762512,0.0,0.0,0.1294590153860909,0.08954337757031393,0.09184943430521816,0.0,0.0,0.07695626228516117,0.10252404069883694,0.10003815031422453,0.0,0.08271055055940119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679514373595264,0.07068001773183373,0.0,0.0,0.08599987930657108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13939585505109012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31766537967565617,0.08001832501919175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776777556261638,0.0,0.09880565658729293,0.08768908916441306,0.0,0.09212559700399202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05870825982220941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341651545796853,0.2802526638622466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258580002404044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209752854380824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062218953325850965,0.09968026182702053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582986578709617,0.0,0.0,0.1081057403023976,0.07274121348280456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833968996632995,0.0,0.1334330439849732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180289832880838
mentalhealth,anonicusadronicus,2020/02/14,"Suicide Plan I’ve been thinking about killing myself for most of my life. I feel like at this point if I don’t do something about it, nothing will ever change and I’m just going to devolve into this numb, unfeeling creature pseudo-satisfied with its own mediocrity. I have a plan to combine drugs this Saturday and end my life. I will be leaving behind friends, parents, a partner, and a stepson. I know I’m supremely selfish. That’s part of why I think they will be better off without me. 

I failed my goal of becoming a musician. I ended up some mediocre music teacher of no consequence. I teach upper middle class kids, but my own art quite honestly sucks. I’ve been a jack of all trades master of none for my whole life. I’m not impressive physically nor mentally and I ultimately see no purpose in continuing on this way. I’m just an altar to being kind of okay on the surface but actually shitty underneath. Most of my life has been abuse, disappointment and neglect and I’ve tried so many times to get better but I don’t think it’s actually possible. 

Anyway, I just wanted to announce it somewhere before I go for it. I’m not scared anymore. I don’t believe in God or heaven or Hell or anything. I mostly just want experience to stop because it’s so regularly and consistently painful. I wish I could be normal and enjoy life like other people do, but I can’t let go of so much. I’m basically fucked from drug use and addiction anyway, so it’s not like the world will miss me or be worse. If anything, my partner can move on to someone worth her time and my stepson can have someone actually capable to look up to. 

Goodbye Reddit. It’s been nice.",3.4019714285714286,5.404736070769231,5.021093406593408,79.73744230769233,74.44615384615385,7.596703296703295,29.76098901098901,8.418075326091056,2.4142989010989018,1313,59,242,24,28,443,181,325,0.18100000000000002,0.667,0.151,-0.9421,1,0,3,0,1,3,34.0,0,0,1,10,13,26,4,1,8,1,26,11,0,1,2,49,50,25,2,7,18,1,1,3,3,4,10,0,0,3,14,12,0,2,5,1,2,4,12,12,0,0,4,3,31,14,38,35,11,29,3,4,2,1,7,16,3,10,11,165,45,5,0.0,0.12308797454807115,0.3041333795558135,0.11325112209734252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302704061825944,0.0,0.0,0.17097872506658152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332796817655584,0.1147339736671201,0.08839937186073264,0.11704399672529707,0.0,0.1837575273860544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098976597360165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294455283598355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409496587680316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18402439991467445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397087437076383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162048518418644,0.0,0.0,0.05252790526410246,0.07421621057877238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026209988068783,0.09604097366474858,0.05427617024270457,0.0,0.17712249855085702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11493451566909835,0.10818132839299673,0.057093052918221636,0.0,0.0,0.11000032061725716,0.0,0.10623051846730212,0.36688892570207904,0.1522604208097714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723811257685098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10532414303926917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469269807641554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041442401918926,0.07636819560882806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017862660075668,0.09968146102365982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054207530847232,0.0,0.11535315775854225,0.11249846201236104,0.0,0.07202150242490812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820589050070784,0.11711590542574475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104955953616924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10400805309375076,0.0,0.08278372688288807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17604461588745432,0.07997655207091113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685338447879776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11363447073002107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19969794674884747,0.0,0.0,0.12115357535168901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053180460534181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972418699949113,0.0,0.0,0.122549360671365,0.08245990621627765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374099625405194,0.11598505812235692,0.11946382364768934,0.10014243921735792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058687540515741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oftentimesdead,2020/02/14,"when is it okay to miss general meetings/appointments due to low mood? I'm not always a good judge of how I doing. people tell me not to push myself or put too much on my plate and that my expectations of myself are too high, even when I feel like the task shouldn't be considered as my limit and that I'm barely doing anything. if I can leave the house, I should be fine to go to a meeting, right? I think most days I'm a 2/10 on the fatigue scale, and going to an appointment is a level 6 skill, so I have to mentally prepare for days beforehand. 

there have been times when I really really didn't want to go to appointments, they went shittily, and made me feel even worse afterwards. most of the time my anxiety hijacks my depression and makes me go using nervous energy because I feel guilty. how do you judge your capabilities? how do you know when to tap out?",6.670632183908047,5.681339741379311,7.412068965517242,76.35649425287356,65.3793103448276,11.411494252873563,31.402298850574713,10.746095033038511,3.089947126436781,681,21,139,16,9,228,107,174,0.146,0.8059999999999999,0.048,-0.9341,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,3,1,2,14,10,0,1,9,1,16,1,0,6,0,29,34,16,0,5,4,0,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,5,0,0,7,4,5,0,0,4,3,22,4,18,26,3,24,0,4,0,0,6,7,0,4,11,93,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812715662395984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13618504785907332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649554463511408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851952703527322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296167419752185,0.0,0.1533286298640911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23516146810918626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700372489223949,0.12717774314035538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4046921725844057,0.14931498768817275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18808822870745293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20541153321690545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783530528583902,0.0,0.0,0.18849780137952274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697173001772805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684471191647016,0.11882993750588335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17940259898477556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086540918069878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341686626879997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895957842469218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280887347166852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520283697897202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559759518580352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140682248043596,0.0,0.0,0.2076101456333297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15375238803909366,0.0,0.0,0.10500098962163576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16502660842178038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18141790188910054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rotflallthetime,2020/02/14,"Is it possible to feel mentally happy, but physically and emotionally depressed? Everything in my life seems like it's going so well, and I've dealt with severe depression in the past. But in recent years, I've had some kind of epiphany that made dealing with my depression a thousand times easier and it was almost non-existent for almost a whole year. Until now. The past few weeks I haven't been able to concentrate or think. My mind has been extremely foggy and I just feel sad. But I'm not sad. I've been doing so well and I'm excited about the future (I'm a senior in high school) my mood swings have been really severe. A week ago, I wanted to go get food, so I went to the kitchen with my boyfriend and I all the sudden felt extremely depressed. I sat on the floor not talking or listening and I couldn't even think. I just sad there and started crying for no reason and starring at my food cabinet. Then a couple minutes later I was okay and asked my boyfriend if he could make me a bowl of ice cream and in the few minutes it took him to make me a bowl, I was back on the floor laying down crying again and I just felt like I never wanted to get up or move or do anything. And I've been feeling like this on and off a lot. I'll be sad in the morning, then after an hour or so, I'll be happy again. Then by lunch I'll be really sad again. Then by the time 6th period begins, I'm happy again. Then when it's time to go home, I'll be sad again. Can anyone help me? I'm so sorry this is so long you guys.",1.921436058700209,3.486893386792456,3.697672955974842,89.52961215932915,77.39622641509435,6.975262054507338,21.211740041928717,7.793537801064563,0.7395274633123692,1179,30,260,18,27,396,156,318,0.179,0.6990000000000001,0.122,-0.9761,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,0,0,22,22,0,0,19,1,23,5,0,4,2,54,53,36,0,5,14,0,5,3,0,0,1,1,2,1,8,17,4,0,9,0,0,6,6,10,2,1,15,7,24,11,32,32,6,58,0,10,1,0,9,16,0,11,39,166,32,2,0.09615931305016384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085239429098022,0.0,0.19257932367149488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723682750006661,0.0,0.0791309213358197,0.0,0.08989597714880734,0.0,0.0,0.07394057617541178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677538691603934,0.1063984509106412,0.21125298018424252,0.0,0.09913602941345202,0.3312875017059377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816628449173707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06351231936955283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642179018118848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586311382672146,0.0686962324565763,0.1846560406442914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23255244606793066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004785444788528,0.0,0.1639486607959409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521283806532377,0.0,0.30709013045117994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445356058619915,0.10159759375013523,0.09645563134046466,0.0,0.09469755353584997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013512714797852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792016657606738,0.14093574948538148,0.0,0.0,0.08509796609228136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175120926567349,0.0,0.0909882670429861,0.12837417630057474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690597064276256,0.0,0.09709349424186987,0.0,0.0,0.10220213185002894,0.0,0.0,0.07416399025789779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835898899188992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840517726177942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12320423647973835,0.09886778912654134,0.09494572089107273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731835850747757,0.0,0.0875398271096437,0.0,0.21726530617284304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764247828074504,0.06806205670617406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772892133796816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232300101193224,0.0,0.0,0.16821380619678553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10683653495871147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343450847775895,0.0,0.15426640137698466,0.0,0.1729175414026829,0.08914064657643474,0.0,0.10735843897346477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12384688979477322
mentalhealth,Fuckedintheheadtoo,2020/02/14,"Hatred and anger towards women. I have been dealing with these feelings for the last couple months. I fell in love with someone, and she broke my heart. This in conjunction with past relationships is turning me into someone filled with a hatred for all women.

I am constantly angry and depressed that I let myself be a fucking fool and actually fall in love with her. I go from one second to wanting to hurt myself or hurt someone else. I am terrified I am going to snap and hurt someone.",5.056537267080749,6.809533815217392,5.6965838509316775,77.62978260869569,69.54347826086956,7.431055900621117,30.534161490683232,7.957251820313856,2.319442236024845,389,16,65,5,7,126,61,92,0.332,0.597,0.07200000000000001,-0.9841,0,0,0,0,0,2,8.0,0,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,3,0,8,4,1,0,1,15,16,6,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,11,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,8,0,2,1,1,13,2,16,13,1,14,0,5,0,3,8,5,1,1,4,52,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.1521919172250812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685345356047379,0.0,0.0,0.17256388761585575,0.0,0.0,0.160785222829538,0.1343258729888226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302823887928289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885674326478294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441800956101817,0.0,0.0,0.17726835954357725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18481026013089985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.500866840371916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712608963313438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15947699950231325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28151527007737737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448370217561007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10568076485972926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148878977373362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16743987331639745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.528568767720173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696368579330403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198771037162776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NyCNwb,2020/02/14,"Mental Turmoil and I just need to vent Hello, I am new to this sub and this account is a throw away. I just feel like I need to talk or have some place where I can just get these thoughts out of my head. Also if this comes off as a rambled mess I apologize I am just jotting down and not really thinking of how to structure this.

Lately a lot of burden has been placed on me. I am in a weird place where my ex and I live together but I am the one who is forced to take care of all the financials. On top of that this girl I was talking to for less than 2 months wants to get married so I can take care of her and buy her things. My mom and stepfather may be forced to leave their home. I'm broke as fuck and trying to make it out of the struggle. And the one thing I feel like I had the most potential in I haven't been able to do since I have been focusing on a dead end job just to keep me and this girl afloat. 

​

It has me feeling stuck, like I don't where to turn or what to do. I feel like I am usually fairly good at making a decision or picking a direction, but right now I am just feeling lost. I understand that this storm will pass, because they always do. It is just like how much longer can I stand out here without an umbrella. Is it worth it? I think I have to talk more and really say how I feel more. I was told by the 2 month marriage girl that I just let life happen to me and I think that is one piece of advice that I appreciate the most. Sorry for the rambling I just really needed to get this out of my head, it felt like it was burning a hole. 

​

I'll make it and I'll figure it out, I always do. I just wish the answers were a little easier to find.",2.441997892518444,3.130199084931508,3.9156849315068483,91.99308482613282,74.58904109589041,7.368809272918861,23.07955742887249,7.61054688173877,0.6889430979978917,1306,33,313,16,26,434,173,365,0.10800000000000001,0.759,0.133,0.8508,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,2,2,20,17,1,2,19,0,37,4,2,7,1,71,73,25,1,6,18,2,7,6,0,2,1,1,1,3,27,18,0,1,16,0,3,3,4,8,0,3,13,8,44,9,47,56,10,34,0,2,0,1,18,23,1,9,13,226,71,1,0.08723246169540101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524255197817407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975976810159182,0.14516879235476318,0.18903267160325893,0.2119939780572963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819577692798729,0.0,0.0,0.05317609898707968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787861687454495,0.0,0.0,0.07514304166055959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726206909574714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264644122052403,0.18695666419519347,0.08375684310434098,0.0,0.07972888964030549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064500519223729,0.13672608254629534,0.0,0.0,0.07316645015398973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713937778761427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790513445305797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750127158066744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865647580430337,0.07753622004437895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840201637099864,0.09236658156228712,0.0,0.08920110226364877,0.0616148674658399,0.2557042470152136,0.08742984340874914,0.07702786184982363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522453658026134,0.07416191947107949,0.0,0.0,0.17468503665853916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790980409500791,0.0,0.0,0.10216560484263568,0.13925623735807904,0.0,0.0641258964418044,0.1940452950858936,0.0,0.08424965508529307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17733292091597053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27341806796596285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765004603074574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449604565779944,0.0,0.06937075479482259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215959374982198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764959904117293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119430916205376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117590996227,0.210342445211528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590674283512832,0.16768511748596596,0.0,0.06925283062562236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335435541497542,0.0,0.05922511540200497,0.09488386889264053,0.0,0.090812069042906,0.0,0.0,0.09607423244812424,0.0,0.051451966023096964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003130258964524,0.08408898017671171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119939780572963,0.0
mentalhealth,helenkellerhere,2020/02/14,"Two weeks ago, my father-in-law went from a stable, sensible man to an unpredictable, paranoid mess. What’s happening? So, he’s had anxiety attacks in his life before. He takes benzos as needed for his anxiety here and there (maybe 1 every other month on bad days). I’ve never known him to be anything but stable. Two weeks ago, he got a blood clot in his knee and this came right after his mother in law  nearly passed away from kidney issues. He and his wife are caretakers for her. 
He’s recently had issues at work with not having promised hours. He works when he’s called to come in. Finances are an issue right now too. So stress certainly is a factor. 
He’s fairly active, a healthy eater, and fit (mid 50’s).

Here’s what’s happened since over the past two weeks:
- his sleep cycle has been horrible.
- he calls his two children who live closest to him and talks to them about his personal issues (testicle pain, sexual details, etc...). This may not sound like a big deal, but he is one of the most modest men you’ll ever meet.
- he says things like, “I am afraid to fall asleep because I feel like I’m going to be buried.” & “my hands are crumbling because I don’t have enough water in me.”
- he drank 72 oz of water one morning within an hour because he felt like his body was crumbling and breaking apart.
- he weeps for hours at a time. I’ve never seen him cry. Ever! And his daughter said the only times he’s cried were when his parents passed away.
- he calls his children all the time and tries to guilt them if they need to go, “you are trying to ignore me aren’t you?” (He never calls his kids before all this.)
- he feels like people are trying to take his credit card information with devices at the grocery stores. To the point that he literally followed a guy out the door of a grocery store and wrote down his license plate number and called his son to give him the details because he was sure that he was going to get captured for turning them in. He called his son back a few minutes later and told him to destroy the evidence because he didn’t want those people tracing the information back to him and hurt them because he thought he was being followed.
- he called his son about a week ago and told him to come and get all of his guns out of his house because he was afraid of himself. His son went and got them all.

He went and saw a doctor about the issues and was prescribed a sleep aid, anti-depressant, and an anti-anxiety medication. The doctor said it was stress induced anxiety. He suggested that he and his wife “get away.”
Today, they went to a cottage on a nice little tourist island west of Seattle. There is no cell service, but there’s a community phone. No more than two hours of being there he called his son and told him to come and get them because he was afraid that he was going to hurt himself or someone else. There are no weapons there.
He tried to guilt trip him into coming and getting him. “I feel like you guys are abandoning me! I just don’t know what I’ll do now.”

1. What should we do?
2. What is happening to this man?! 

He is a COMPLETELY DIFFERENT PERSON. Think of your most stable friend or family member. Then imagine them changing instantly so much that they now fit into your top 10 list of most crazy people you know. It was like a switch flipped and it hasn’t flipped back for two weeks, now.",3.7135460739682853,5.232548403641887,4.239700080335627,87.68076110565625,72.55083459787556,6.8681722157755365,24.90942902198816,7.362008331298528,1.0573830878633697,2614,79,525,28,51,826,294,659,0.14300000000000002,0.7909999999999999,0.067,-0.9946,5,0,0,1,0,0,91.0,1,7,10,3,27,31,3,7,33,0,44,16,8,1,11,80,94,36,0,5,9,10,5,7,1,3,5,4,1,10,21,35,3,2,13,0,4,19,13,18,0,8,33,11,64,13,69,54,12,91,0,4,2,0,135,34,0,7,44,312,85,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318627389850324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05426474697003996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15325297244131222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04121391815343181,0.0,0.0,0.05697647198538645,0.14116345839523786,0.11553186048896305,0.04181708772587254,0.24424032369972004,0.0,0.08523363302105035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05563075589707115,0.0,0.0,0.4091215149791384,0.05728143809147824,0.0,0.0,0.05298101447241585,0.1725677622893688,0.052510915280941504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100273178677218,0.03229929495124047,0.051633219142776916,0.043136285253837,0.0,0.0,0.05232591858106563,0.0,0.1025238381819106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04183779462193707,0.0,0.0,0.051748971962859915,0.05585561647057944,0.0,0.09060561011002788,0.042196961117959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04721365365039727,0.0,0.07597018123101235,0.10733759398171676,0.0480873899682857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03869388561667059,0.0,0.13083110996373756,0.04804403324740954,0.11385295108988835,0.0,0.08011166048189422,0.0,0.0,0.09917979088166927,0.13286429636428132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19728607501957976,0.057788884562044736,0.10722945336708056,0.0,0.0,0.2613674169473001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05504844907890933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035374998028316576,0.17127565483842638,0.05019617286225981,0.04422407404468817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050314954342868486,0.0,0.0,0.050453202317042034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039975652992388366,0.0,0.03681665730191702,0.07427159724475353,0.1158809441172514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787487052791813,0.0380902641881024,0.053291683424352976,0.0,0.05561107793673315,0.0,0.04780974724661776,0.10416342635862308,0.08746082553899072,0.0,0.0,0.04734448138743491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049450772261537414,0.0,0.0,0.08554096037691165,0.0952805182730365,0.03982789243927541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041429051000382314,0.0,0.10023803832179376,0.0,0.042435036217005916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473947075507353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0472024933487352,0.0,0.0753121405130118,0.04025469766559401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033272820083030015,0.032091067975505434,0.0,0.0397601885323367,0.08761113764175718,0.0,0.0474726856955754,0.14356892807200136,0.0,0.13601187029960213,0.054475759066707465,0.2935420023278005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029540162488041723,0.0,0.2008672062970631,0.0,0.0,0.18570921455869166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292182245946299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,footsiesuagage,2020/02/14,"Any dissaciators here? Depersonalizers? It sucks. Period. Lately I’ve been feeling and telling myself I’m crazy. I just sound crazy 😔 someone even told me I do :( it’s just ....I’ve had such a fucked up past, is all.",-0.8264285714285721,0.2540201666666704,2.062285714285718,87.7577142857143,121.14285714285714,4.5371428571428565,16.104761904761904,6.2581,0.02843047619047656,165,5,35,3,10,57,34,42,0.32899999999999996,0.638,0.033,-0.9254,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,2,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,5,9,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,4,0,1,6,1,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,2,0,3,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649495438582739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25733507430003577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19699955119902915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3601900478145125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43949934527533707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719287724962511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33011701253328635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3405380910401069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722909954671049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,omgwtfbbqsaus,2020/02/14,"Fragile state of mind? I think my state of mind is still too fragile. And I think of suicide, or at least death (the concept, not the actual of), way more often than I'd like.

Am I alright? How often do people think of these things? When can I know if I'm completely ""alright"" and happy dandy?",1.3687005649717534,3.5138221694915264,2.8450000000000024,92.17959039548029,81.54237288135593,5.289265536723164,21.69774011299436,6.42735559955562,0.3589638418079097,224,7,47,2,6,73,41,59,0.128,0.7290000000000001,0.14300000000000002,-0.4397,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,1,0,14,9,6,2,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,5,4,7,9,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,3,33,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.2529358292785858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271759842747614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27591669574953986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14244617319224348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662903315667912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5234238444062138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17969239484668995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20699256047974274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835160263964687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17219689097317456,0.4982429009264443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20573603060121512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,orangesherbet7,2020/02/14,"mental health & modelling so I've been interested in doing modelling for a few years now but my parents said to wait until I finished school to apply for anything. I graduated at the end of last year and I've started looking into it. I have sent photos to a few agencies in my city and there is one agency who would like to do a test shoot and another agency that would like to meet with me in person. I have also applied to a modelling competition which is being held in a few months. 

I haven't replied to them yet because I've been having second thoughts about it and whether doing modelling is the best thing for me. I am quite insecure about the way I look, mostly I focus on flaws that I perceive such as my nose being too big or something like that and I can't stop thinking about it. I have never had any issues with weight/eating and I am comfortable with my body, but it is mostly my  face and/or hair that preoccupies me. I always get really anxious when getting ready to go somewhere and even something small like a bit of hair being frizzy or a small part of my dress not looking right stresses me out. whenever I take photos at social events I always zoom in on myself and scrutinise myself for ages. 

I always assumed that doing modelling might increase my self confidence and help me get more comfortable with photos but I also know that it is a really harsh industry and I am worried that getting into it will negatively impact my mental health. also, as I said I haven't had problems with my weight or body before but since I am already insecure about somethings about myself I feel like I have the potential to have other body image issues. 

people have always told me I look good and I exercise and stay fit so I thought to make the most of it while I'm young and do modelling but I'm worried that it will negatively impact my mental health and whether it is a good choice to do it.",5.842680771913508,6.276378032085567,6.5271401999535,77.22861311322949,66.80748663101605,9.178144617530807,30.4319925598698,9.085049710711278,2.5358762148337597,1520,53,279,25,23,500,174,374,0.061,0.77,0.16899999999999998,0.9919,1,0,3,1,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,17,15,0,3,14,0,38,12,7,1,1,52,63,34,0,3,11,1,4,5,0,5,4,2,0,2,22,22,1,3,7,1,0,3,7,4,0,2,11,11,46,11,44,44,11,39,0,0,4,0,12,17,0,8,22,216,68,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425094664219606,0.20490462044163169,0.28426849368826024,0.092540607287009,0.0,0.058081043446063865,0.08955877519324376,0.0,0.0964878504013832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028432320344892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05206452886352394,0.0,0.07267676163127472,0.0,0.08963146792209167,0.0,0.09324449866857457,0.2846104085250394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873947213250348,0.0,0.0,0.07564701629332553,0.0,0.0,0.0564118337890458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04318535267290887,0.06101620104164874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849069304257087,0.0,0.048539898477244485,0.14327402078928567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27235729418208005,0.0,0.0,0.05724784707900143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828959565733496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046938548435348115,0.0696197279705125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20863259689414165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28688817033218955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057011165457022686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25821652696656183,0.09060544357652547,0.0,0.0,0.0681726426671226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587268002633485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05787534346791064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483657828519464,0.0924896154289214,0.0,0.05921184114642351,0.07457583754762498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172487072999872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908429763285984,0.0,0.0,0.109430374758651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293881261036632,0.16248701995193812,0.0,0.0,0.08643845980183812,0.0,0.0,0.08910020579837992,0.0,0.0,0.07065120088031664,0.0,0.0,0.08706371166632701,0.0,0.1972560445374866,0.0,0.0,0.06045292422575144,0.09103462158026827,0.0,0.07140574178037745,0.09783571191557232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421693279991289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056741939261874326,0.0547266334915663,0.0,0.13561039894500404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161195210009434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779368248972545,0.0,0.2080102861905164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17347395471390686,0.0,0.1213441950078314,0.0,0.0,0.11000118137304628
mentalhealth,AllSpiceRick,2020/02/14,"It feels like im slowly sinking Im a normal girl of normal weight and height. Im 23, and I workout 5 times a week and pretty fit. I and take care of my skin and hair. 

However, recently I have developed crippling low self esteem (or maybe its depression). After leaving an extremely abusive relationship. I am completely disgusted with myself and the way I look and before this relationship I was not. I cant imagine anyone being attracted to me or even wanting to be around me as a friend. I feel horrible about the way I look and I don't feel I have the brains or personality to make up for it. 

I wasn't always this negative about myself but it's like I can't get out of these thinking patterns and the logical side of me knows something is wrong with how I view myself. Ive always been insecure but im having trouble looking in the mirror and it's starting to impact my functionality. Im in college so i need to be able to focus. 

Im constantly afraid of him finding out where I live or running into him while im alone. Im on edge and when im feeling safe I drop back into depression. I have no appetite and im beginning to loose weight and muscle and i get very little sleep. I have nightmares when i do sleep, Ive been having the urge to self harm like I used to as a teenager but I dont. 

What are some small steps to get me out of this pattern. Im getting worse the day and I don't want to hurt myself or become suicidal. Which I have been before. I need to be able to focus on school. Please help.",1.2512500000000024,3.3738153471337604,3.60693869426752,86.67977109872614,81.83439490445859,6.472770700636943,23.18829617834395,7.645422480735847,1.1815417197452232,1185,42,245,20,32,409,160,314,0.172,0.722,0.106,-0.9762,1,1,1,0,0,2,25.0,0,0,0,0,10,17,1,2,12,0,27,7,5,3,0,52,50,30,1,6,9,0,8,3,1,0,0,0,0,4,11,23,2,1,9,1,0,2,9,10,0,0,5,12,40,7,38,41,1,35,0,4,4,0,10,18,0,6,15,161,51,2,0.13100285424577446,0.07760848026799484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783972430246976,0.0,0.0,0.10900486915233278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0458001208283616,0.0,0.0,0.058310157248355164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05036655429569724,0.0,0.0,0.07234118007146023,0.11147378014701947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312125529170217,0.0,0.0,0.06678307039306132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686770001215455,0.07078377291154382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04224300169639708,0.0,0.11283256640152275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676718475884982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043263074855995065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324779586040261,0.04679423262439461,0.0,0.0,0.05986711773191328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05060624011182742,0.0,0.1368871688000093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04390422588964539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012063246778938,0.0,0.7782805953345011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035997871336431245,0.0,0.0,0.06935655366368433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960020660620815,0.0656496378194672,0.05783896019128446,0.0,0.16501410548177098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043722711231444486,0.0,0.06580498753513213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713695649210292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835498262124762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057193319655882785,0.0,0.07190089727152939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663849957209576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467475713280373,0.1406480390103778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629094120265963,0.0,0.0,0.13666454763923672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310974629403924,0.0,0.0,0.05042619870939157,0.0,0.0,0.046362247251574784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716479299606208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049248921443225964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041970669668639535,0.0,0.0,0.03819440890387908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05657220229578475,0.0,0.054045537240771616,0.07726887760107391,0.10398396801935146,0.05254129385280281,0.15952618409693942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06675155018169515,0.0,0.07161552797258243,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HellGirl6669,2020/02/14,"I'm going to the hospital today So basically, I've been having pain on my left lower abdomen and my right side not as much, my doctor wants an ultrasound which I'm going to do today, pelvic ultrasound and KUB? I have one more appointment tomorrow where I have to fast for it, I'm a girl btw, I'm super worried. I really don't want an internal ultrasound or whatever it is, i think it's my kidneys, I think I might have kidney stones although there's nothing wrong with my pee, has anyone else had this experience? Or kidney stones? Could someone give me advice please.
ALSO
I know this probably isn't the right place to post this but i couldn't find somewhere to post that relates to health.",3.2214720194647204,5.255769291970808,4.7106751824817525,81.62372566909977,75.05839416058393,8.070316301703164,25.2852798053528,8.841846274778883,2.0451805352798056,551,19,104,12,12,184,88,137,0.057999999999999996,0.895,0.047,0.2064,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,5,0,14,8,5,0,0,16,26,9,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,2,0,14,1,10,21,2,15,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,3,4,65,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621036738537513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266044286601372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599263232191248,0.1699716921484938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324479389798083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697932298640085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385780010818818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227013541671162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15161847719297544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591347285749745,0.18855576066905366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763310128688683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911676165647258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802376196713761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759807794235278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194664708118183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15917385308215434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240989118148374,0.0,0.17651635393236134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17331748165175254,0.18209502922681375,0.0,0.0,0.31774938334888136,0.0,0.17885514501615196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627199582313793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28333461184498804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055622548772076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21258845466469928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144845443756658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956898878737924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16846715029020876,0.0,0.0,0.1813723076363454,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SanchezKevin,2020/02/14,"Internet Cure In today’s time, is it possible to try healing mental health problems like anxiety and all be cured through watching internet videos?",7.8048,10.525886480000004,7.221,65.55550000000002,64.2,11.4,44.5,11.20814326018867,6.3686000000000025,122,8,16,4,2,38,24,25,0.158,0.753,0.09,-0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921770348729333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40597599537383505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18659274710278745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38489775672078186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4305710914221552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3654574683712535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227076970426851,0.0,0.3620270021007149,0.0,0.0,0.25930684631175993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ayyothickness,2020/02/14,"Coming off risperidone So I’ve been on risperidone since April of 2017 when I went into an adderal induced psychosis and ended up in the psych ward. I saw a psychiatrist when I got out and he cut the dose from 4 mg to 2 and cut my Ativan to 1/3. I had another episode where I was up for 3 days and ended up back in the psych ward. 

While I was at the second place they put me on a whole plethora of other meds along with the risperidal, but after about a year and a half I was down to only taking risperidone. Starting in feb of last year i started going down from my 4 mg dose by 0.5mg every 1-2 months, with some longer periods while I was in between pyschs. 


Just this past Tuesday was the first night I stopped taking it completely. I feel good but I’m scared because a lot of emotions are coming back and I’m thinking a lot more than I have been the past almost 3 years. 

I’m just wondering if anyone else has successfully weaned of risperidal and if you have any helpful tips or tricks. Or things I can do if I start to feel like the thoughts are too much (like taking risperidal again and at what dose). I know I can talk to my psychiatrist but I just wanted to see if any of you all have any suggestions? 

Thanks for reading and I hope you all are having a great day/night!",4.246978609625671,4.655206015151517,4.814197860962569,88.20673796791445,70.28787878787878,7.423885918003565,26.89304812834225,7.048011613610866,1.0815176470588233,1004,30,218,8,17,321,146,264,0.043,0.8420000000000001,0.114,0.9723,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,3,1,2,12,11,3,1,16,0,19,3,0,1,2,44,44,23,0,6,12,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,16,0,1,7,1,0,5,0,4,0,3,12,4,26,7,40,32,8,50,0,0,2,0,8,18,0,12,29,148,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995640500516574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24439212083920225,0.12561447310293622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376276286667933,0.12274312823567934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18422841108618696,0.0,0.07302532159950252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20638387876329373,0.12560174889350198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545144628387488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007253056336804,0.13475214662741444,0.2122038867323002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093162699699423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114291000668265,0.08558087052945472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018967306738756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808170119044972,0.10047753886736356,0.09581021973673692,0.13207332796226032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029540524186095,0.0,0.0,0.11898248995057152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583565951187445,0.0976481135178076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705061251410212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20368918077754644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306414857856494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561844241603,0.0,0.08806238704454336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248371420001085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110874895714463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287138906722105,0.0,0.0,0.12515925214935614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204260756087402,0.0,0.0,0.11982643615058634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993471044158732,0.0,0.09546032271198417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909484976230656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25437246794959617,0.0,0.0,0.10015316322618817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702105793835016,0.09628589410272274,0.0,0.11029023711354312,0.0,0.0,0.079585822693976,0.07675916978439436,0.0,0.09510306931955864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065761568324619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105025502514937,0.0,0.13374574321583338,0.0,0.0,0.12991150265415166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23143026033564154
mentalhealth,ReneeLSnell,2020/02/14,"I'm desperate and need some opinions My mom has always had something wrong with her, and shes been getting worse to the point where shes not really my mom anymore, I'd love to hear some opinions of what she possibly could have and what I can do to at least have a relationship with her before it's too late. Her entire life shes been very socially weird. Shes super nice but when you talk to her you could tell something's off. Shed go on ramblings a lot. She dealt with some weird types of paranoia, like she would see a group of teenage girls at the mall and run, and I mean full on run, in the opposite direction. She was and still is too scared to go to any kind of doctor, after she was treated for her second case of breast cancer (~2010) she stopped going all together. Her dental health has always been poor. Shes so paranoid now that she has even lost teeth, clearly has some kind of gum disease that she is still to scared to treat, and now has lost a noticeably large amount of hair. The ramblings have gotten worse and I've noticed that she talks to herself. The last time I saw her she visited where i live and talked to herself and noted different lampposts that were new. Its bizarre. She cant hold conversations, often times it's like talking to a brick wall. She talks to her 10 year old daughter like shes a puppy (baby talking and whatnot) and does the same to me (I'm 18) in texts. She sends me barbies for my birthday and for some reason cant grasp how old I am, when I ask her what shes been up to she cant comprehend it. After not seeing her for 3 years, she had lost a terrifying amount of weight and her mental condition had worsened severely. I dont know what's wrong with her and I'm kind of desperate because it hurts to watch this happen. We have ruled out possible drug abuse because a lot of these issues were present when we still lived with her, she didn't have issues like that then. She also only ticks a few boxes for it, she doesnt get super upedy or awake or anything, shes still down to earth. If any one could give their opinion I'm all ears. We've spoken to several professionals who have no idea what it is.",4.154431731502669,5.014684782608698,4.6452334096109835,87.70338024408848,70.73913043478261,7.74886346300534,26.23714721586575,7.908726449838941,1.310249183829138,1698,51,360,21,30,539,219,437,0.177,0.755,0.068,-0.9945,1,0,3,0,1,0,41.0,2,2,1,5,18,23,0,2,15,0,46,11,4,2,3,57,70,26,0,6,6,3,2,4,0,1,5,2,0,1,20,23,1,2,5,1,1,7,9,10,0,2,17,8,58,13,49,49,15,45,0,4,4,2,68,15,0,14,27,236,78,3,0.0,0.09225152045385396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622647166069172,0.12957172826283347,0.0,0.0,0.10589511459357354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721632580105155,0.0,0.0,0.06407225161745418,0.0,0.07278870977416542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949256232867649,0.0,0.0662532346580563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18649493113958496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081347262566961,0.0,0.07969314070459893,0.0681359231137489,0.0,0.09125149069419852,0.0,0.09029303006975396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05142588053770121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135740713397227,0.07469052991966098,0.13274911588963306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885145446849797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827616756592595,0.08775402348682741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335087786800932,0.08789460787458189,0.0,0.16253149085129656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432380270846211,0.04278989038853126,0.06346639655550525,0.0878296162620077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05499491133551719,0.15215410361266304,0.0,0.13750383980438127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549805831733992,0.1323877938403413,0.07027180580603719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481250538202005,0.0,0.0,0.07846469659953433,0.0,0.0,0.1823776828855553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05773229869798016,0.0,0.07519779725294973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17728854463181618,0.16340221469062027,0.0,0.0527600380868516,0.059216136212765835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360298802119628,0.1755511923000284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987919202005301,0.08005317965266348,0.0,0.08359263963651606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559031428142715,0.0,0.12408888361064813,0.0,0.0,0.17591956633200773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936859581740481,0.0,0.11988106159496455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487167966868741,0.06509455374621574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754861318469016,0.06805318410636464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080173409018873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424276015958359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948126608350368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15869224537444254,0.05530960134846743,0.17025565558718375,0.0,0.10027873997946077
mentalhealth,WonderfulTeam,2020/02/14,"Unable to detect the name of my mental (?) illness. Need Help. Hey.

My body react in a violent and a sudden way for a few seconds every time I see something that reminds me of my ex. That also happens when I relive past memories (not necessarily bad/painful ones).

An example of said reaction would be my eyes going up and body freezing.

I also feel excruciating pain mainly in my chest area for hours whenever I talk so much and people react coldly to me. Not sure if it's related though.

I have a hard time describing how it feels so I'll answer any additional questions.

Thanks.",3.5116216216216216,5.741710477477479,5.535396396396396,75.14687837837839,74.85585585585585,8.043603603603604,27.316216216216226,8.841846274778883,2.5001091891891893,457,18,79,10,10,158,83,111,0.16399999999999998,0.787,0.048,-0.9074,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,7,4,1,0,6,0,3,6,4,3,1,18,11,11,0,3,3,1,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,2,0,2,1,8,12,2,10,8,3,12,0,0,2,0,7,4,0,2,6,53,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28530114302289034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12130464442975612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489400056324196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3962803507963635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029300145862007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803887650684363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137757133971803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774101071286903,0.0,0.15979361057690047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11956447960058028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756685527531022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976527355064278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13112996251342768,0.13226664879771438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087503157797845,0.0,0.37961819251575535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028407312521016,0.12366636186500665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19982663424428704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16968040698187825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214591449139954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732578321910036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681212156932475,0.0,0.0,0.1433752378058465,0.0,0.16422851053288698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752576285511073,0.0,0.208029843674848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158988993778565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671616723543486,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,royalmanman1,2020/02/14,"I can’t empathize/connect with anyone To preface this, the text following may come across rudimentary or confusing. Please bare with me as this is the first time I’ve ever reached out to another person about this. I ultimately would like to receive insight on why I cannot truly connect with anyone, so I may then adjust my life accordingly for the better. 

To start things off, I am 18 years old, and I’m currently attending high school. Throughout my years I have associated myself with many different groups, participated in different activities, and have attended numerous events that have exposed me a variety of different people, and yet I still cannot seem to empathize with anyone. I have repetitiously honed in on my people skills, trying to make myself a person that can harbor a healthy community of people, but it seems as though it is futile. Generally speaking, I bring smiles to people’s faces - It appears that I make them happy, but It also seems that I am not able to share this happiness. I try my best to never put anyone down, alienate them, disrespect them, or disregard their feelings. In fact, I tend to keep my mind open to other people; I try to SYMPATHIZE with other people to, once again, harbor a healthy community of people. I do realize that I am quite young, which may be the culprit of my case. Maybe I’m just too naïve, and I’ll grow out if this. It’s also notable that this may be due to mental illness, but I’d rather doubt that. On the contrary, I may not be familiar with the intricacies of mental illness so who knows. In addition, I may just need to improve my people skills more; I could just be blind to social queues, and thus they may not provoke any real feelings on my end. 

I’m open to any and all advice or questions that you may have.",7.693544345532478,7.289814023738874,8.028580613254203,70.84796818331684,63.06528189910979,10.931025387405207,34.745961094625784,10.380263240014207,3.5632487306297405,1414,54,251,29,18,466,176,337,0.08800000000000001,0.799,0.113,0.8963,4,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,5,6,15,8,0,2,10,0,29,5,1,4,4,70,48,21,0,5,14,0,2,1,0,9,4,1,0,2,24,19,0,2,10,0,0,9,7,2,0,1,0,4,37,6,46,34,3,42,0,0,1,0,15,16,0,19,18,182,61,1,0.09503487872730612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928669835999705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199871636614146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292539528388416,0.0996523565893033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265802387508497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973324203822743,0.08405062730679977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186413306032705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587761760529102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978736633815475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417269470594549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08596448865833603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610498032626492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083661929685627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023327911432133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004095671523078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447136680174366,0.0,0.0,0.052228683971735065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671259453603594,0.04642924134901704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687303901680844,0.09635045071545202,0.09547530923746862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915456106301944,0.0,0.09595813611597734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046715839372159,0.0732967571889327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972311863698308,0.10120904424166936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5270817512187428,0.1659615808770577,0.0,0.10431975840411424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553630193057797,0.10646081392832396,0.10108129160093801,0.0,0.10817049777443777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618037094206207,0.0,0.25954855299874113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687609083800447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726617630502366,0.0,0.07589497691318407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06313695059687974,0.0,0.09337128583114378,0.0,0.0554156020361422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19356733320769012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575419632159655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675100511640014,0.0,0.0,0.12239869211898725
mentalhealth,thphtpmkn,2020/02/14,"Idk what's wrong Nothing is fun anymore, I used to love video games and anime but now watching/playing those just feels like a chore, also I'm always eating, I'm not hungry but I just have this urge to eat and when I'm out of food I just pace back and forth not knowing what to do and then the next day I'll get bad stomach pains. Also on always tired, sometimes on the weekends I'll sleep for 12 hours and wake up still tired. Idk what to do",0.5734736842105264,2.6235680842105293,1.778157894736843,99.23460526315789,83.94736842105263,3.8,17.921052631578945,3.1291,-0.9480736842105268,348,8,80,0,10,110,65,95,0.223,0.721,0.057,-0.9433,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,3,0,4,10,3,1,0,16,12,11,0,0,7,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,5,6,3,0,2,3,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,3,3,10,12,0,13,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,10,44,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917340239647948,0.3035465648774025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18089401726446486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025606984404046,0.15229825829684396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763436032506085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732860733518251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922280572623445,0.13030820255706976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22056152254431965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529764630735936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796294723383655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002435053777464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911252497523461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16462515045632095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19398686026506573,0.0,0.0,0.17501987656010795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940888523954808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825339769184388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180400487479468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14566667102808808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4192891036937669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575369780081743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19942822441793373,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coltonious,2020/02/14,"Any tips for battling self consciousness? With assumed depression and anxiety, everything adds up to give me insane amounts of self consciousness. It's been really bad since I got a webcam for my youtube videos. Any suggestions?",6.498157894736843,10.01980171052632,5.815000000000001,70.2925,71.36842105263158,12.221052631578946,35.8157894736842,11.20814326018867,5.87682105263158,187,10,27,8,4,57,34,38,0.324,0.6759999999999999,0.0,-0.9239,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,6,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3977978333596692,0.0,0.22374919729836693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442116368242693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519157454822093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26286545175768056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805769755154484,0.0,0.0,0.2339258996614559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18737252036093585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6102484858318811,0.0,0.0,0.24194550379030225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OhMyDoggos,2020/02/14,"Are you okay? On a real note I know I made my own post complaining about my own issues but if anyone out there needs to talk, I’m always down to help someone out. Let me talk to you when you are down. I’m a 21 year old female. (I’ll even send you pictures of my dogs)",-1.1302857142857157,0.7388400666666683,1.322857142857142,100.84500000000004,90.0,4.095238095238095,13.571428571428573,5.288315135182226,-1.3048571428571427,204,3,52,1,7,69,42,60,0.025,0.887,0.08900000000000001,0.5574,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,4,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,1,0,8,8,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,10,1,10,6,2,10,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,3,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23095861327486236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940818327951391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183330888839168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604781983102456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897086289098985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254398283970874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838318421917427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626413274858752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20581297829737005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912606740448344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658331889508556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159328802003974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351822637985798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4461969056469339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874453815748062
mentalhealth,lizzysworld,2020/02/14,"So tired I’m tired. Mentally, emotionally, physically. I don’t sleep well at night. I have constant dreams that make me feel like I’ve been awake all night. I just wanna sleep but can’t. My doctor has given me so many meds to try over the last almost 3 years, they don’t work. Cbd oil doesn’t work, melatonin gives me nightmares. In return my anxiety is through the roof, most days my Xanax doesn’t help much. I’m short tempered with my husband and kids. I don’t want to be that mom/wife anymore. I’m a pushover and don’t know how to tell people no and because I can’t work I’m always being asked to do for others. If we have things going on with the kids and we don’t tell my in laws, when they find out we get fussed at and drama starts. My mind is all over the place right now. I need sleep, I sleep best during the day for some odd reason. If I try and nap on weekends my husband just doesn’t understand why I need naps, he works 10-12 hours a day 5-7 days a week, and because I stay at home he doesn’t see how I’m so tired all the time. I fear opening up to my counselor in fear of being put in the hospital again. I just need a break from reality and some deep sleep.",1.873339920948613,3.0556328063241125,3.149033596837945,95.0165938735178,76.66798418972333,6.166719367588932,20.950395256916998,6.508806274219699,0.008538498023715313,912,21,220,7,20,296,139,253,0.102,0.8320000000000001,0.066,-0.873,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,3,0,2,5,12,6,1,2,11,0,21,10,5,4,3,43,41,17,0,7,6,2,1,1,0,0,5,0,1,2,4,15,0,0,5,5,0,2,12,3,1,0,2,3,28,3,26,36,8,40,0,0,1,0,16,18,0,6,19,122,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742617874193506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095664455798546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442986664240005,0.0,0.09648979334857613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090957028728801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861939401291735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021043562813788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514056461211538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509870760814107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958482999693613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094429824119568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21896625457741334,0.04919491711643476,0.06950706124224047,0.0,0.0,0.08892521973785332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050832251601552185,0.0933335498973662,0.05529458797093936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521431267394827,0.0,0.0975941072020004,0.0,0.0958152786219728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05347039810771957,0.07930783321648398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04753307627117038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494469503612517,0.09864114057328192,0.0,0.0,0.10807202435751886,0.0,0.09804976190598136,0.0,0.09823949886565754,0.11394989822722006,0.0,0.0,0.0715224990301575,0.2164274528650461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18260820323337545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745161118800233,0.0,0.10165182651634967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097807635756854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003473593762664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830887932794192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753095354016376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4868227810487624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886540024941361,0.10370276925344477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17007899826920556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06463800400464947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05673308375633275,0.3354764263118785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211287464012486,0.0,0.0,0.1012867886524173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057386693897157476,0.0,0.07804361188881799,0.0,0.08747925257568731,0.0,0.08779296486208175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28332561173948245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265433376617616
mentalhealth,throooooowwwaaaawayy,2020/02/14,"I feel like im falling apart My classwork is overwhelming and theres barely any. I spend at least 50 minutes a day crying. My self esteem is plummeting. I “brag” about all ive taken on this year as a cry for help. I have nobody to turn to. Im losing intrest in everything. I just want to lie in bed and listen to music or stare at the ceiling. We cant afford my therapist anymore. I dont have anyone to talk to. I cant even post on my regular account because im scared of my parents knowing. I cant keep my emotions in check. I cry. In public sometimes. I cant ever be nice to my sister. I always have a mask. I never have a “real emotion” shown. It’s just an allusion. I dont know how to make my parents love me again. I try to do what they ask but I’m too slow. They make fake promises. They yell at me for crying and yelling at them when im trying to stay calm. Im scared i dont know who i am. Im disassociating all the time. Im crumbling. I just want to be alone. My emotions feel far off i want them back. I want them back. I cant even tell my best friend. Im afraid to fail. Im trying to do 5-8 things at a time. I cant do my chores without being told. I think that i should harm myself but i cant even get the energy to do that. I sometimes say i would be better off gone but i dont want to. I want to stay. My sister is amazing and she would be sad. She would be sad. I need to help people to distract from helping myself. I want to leave but i cant. My ideal is crying in a studio apartment in a big city. I need to lose weight but i cant. I eat too much. I need to feel something.  I want to do too much. My friend is in a hospital for her mental health. She is getting worse. Shes getting meaner. Im scared. Im fine. Im feeling better. Whoever read this, thanks. Just need to know someone can hear me.",-1.89434049337137,-0.007970925742570856,1.2755579795267664,98.11354337976171,98.6039603960396,3.729082060748449,16.25339822117805,5.481000421620852,-0.7427040946467529,1382,38,335,10,59,486,182,404,0.16399999999999998,0.672,0.16399999999999998,-0.627,3,1,1,0,1,0,53.0,1,0,6,7,18,27,0,6,12,0,42,4,0,3,4,51,79,13,0,17,11,4,5,1,2,4,1,5,3,1,8,5,2,1,9,1,3,2,15,13,0,0,3,11,68,14,47,66,6,36,0,6,1,1,32,20,0,1,12,209,76,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05420989974356039,0.0,0.0,0.04355223351116088,0.0,0.0,0.035593943372547864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05190859915582225,0.036598320289135435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048932138631817404,0.0,0.0,0.08049460362264288,0.0,0.0319068284957309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492906470559422,0.09258342056325364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287472822494846,0.03375586959372959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453748998635669,0.0,0.0,0.05355831399261307,0.0,0.17663107279907353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037129929988347,0.04734578825871471,0.0,0.0,0.04704107071393967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058615277110486,0.03739270295137275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087766367177983,0.0,0.08203865551998761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055636455149775686,0.05899255607194796,0.0,0.10525000101052846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6784522594192712,0.0,0.0,0.046523436699716335,0.0,0.0,0.11506184709294168,0.0,0.0,0.05542197966347446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02557136166609605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711326489201668,0.0,0.0,0.04724015241206532,0.0,0.06987657502278377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05274781519859585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695389541082312,0.15524192431424078,0.04036891046616045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162378496269314,0.0,0.0,0.03628693280462971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050128587784798284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05235555919191533,0.059575966348421626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04162397802809117,0.1572086018764322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054603490080459685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0443486940166609,0.04029496293789408,0.1035339557791576,0.0,0.0,0.1115779253683152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042070030537388434,0.045748686154224505,0.048188924105461085,0.0,0.060772393653378415,0.03477329698477684,0.03353825237795385,0.0,0.0,0.06104137653072556,0.0,0.0,0.050014445836728684,0.0,0.10660911400613184,0.05693240740552408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24697848649123486,0.0,0.0,0.06373771809427158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504552368448681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053340353020054895,0.11154547549684718,0.0,0.0,0.03370614221438304
mentalhealth,connorscott01,2020/02/14,I’m a male who was sexually assaulted by my ex I’m a male who was sexually assaulted by my ex. This happened in July 2019 and I’ve never opened up about it. I was always scared I’d be ridiculed for it and judged because I was (and still am) in love with her. I was also scared people wouldn’t believe me because “men can’t be raped” and would think I was just trying to bring her down with me. I’m not really sure what I’m trying to get out of posting this I guess I just need a place to tell my story.,1.3277477477477468,2.5121349279279284,3.6776576576576585,90.66261261261265,78.09909909909909,6.7351351351351365,21.34234234234234,7.3871296695380915,0.4874936936936929,391,10,93,5,9,136,64,111,0.195,0.767,0.037000000000000005,-0.9492,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,8,4,2,3,0,12,2,0,0,2,18,23,5,0,3,3,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,7,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,6,0,13,2,15,13,0,11,0,0,0,2,11,7,0,1,2,60,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760751698631644,0.18479898554481647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707713962110573,0.0,0.0,0.2502225108744576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603431170121455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446602375919142,0.0,0.19639591305371545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20044740622762824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646789832256538,0.17129164454411305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153971170482222,0.0,0.2320396864465421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21270349239496628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142278322727982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4447072370121366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17736358205571104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093198180394456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941188800143245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423080865600984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015728399343152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776833970064205,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,littleteapot1945,2020/02/14,"Pregnant and having issues. I’m thinking about checking into a mental health facility. 
I see no progress in unpacking my trauma and controlling my mood swings/severe anger and anxiety on my own as I desperately tried and I find myself falling in a endless hole. I have been very depressed since before I even got pregnant, and I try to handle it on my own. I can’t. I need help. Has anybody ever checked into a psychiatric hospital while pregnant? My bad traits have taken a turn for the worst since my second trimester.",4.880644329896906,7.036305556701031,5.5614304123711324,76.7858569587629,70.75257731958762,7.73659793814433,31.712628865979386,8.472884824447931,2.7968360824742264,417,19,68,7,8,135,69,97,0.252,0.6940000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.9601,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,3,6,1,0,5,0,6,1,0,1,1,12,13,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,0,1,2,0,2,1,2,5,0,1,3,1,15,0,10,10,3,9,0,1,1,0,1,6,0,0,2,50,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17219741275569947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18794530900549786,0.0,0.0,0.1915396595862327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524637015323672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938743920793334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867343010422815,0.20361173285657747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057331748444556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800294042822296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392659507777431,0.0,0.0,0.15087674375460905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349411812900423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268432832567265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16690543332433633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17937194046365734,0.0,0.0,0.2542938018324597,0.0,0.3724025854270039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14423208346097127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056500868669834,0.2448392254912284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857273305274063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,someparanoidlunatic,2020/02/14,"Why do I feel like I'm being watched every second of my life? This is a throwaway account for obvious reasons. God forbid random people on reddit going through my post history see that I have an irrational fear.
I think I recall this starting when I was about nine. At the time, I was really into some superhero show, honestly I don't even remember what it was called. For whatever reason, I started getting the feeling that the characters were watching me every second of my life. Sort of like in inside out, only they had no control over me. They just saw me, saw everything I did, probably judged me.
Since then, my brain has convinced itself that everyone is watching me. Be it characters from something I was obsessed with, family members, friends, or bullies from school, they were always watching my life through my eyes.
Obviously, there is no one in my head watching my every move. But for whatever reason, I always feel self concious about doing anything while I'm alone, because some random character from some random game or show has been forced by some unholy being to watch my life unfold. It's gotten to the point where I have had legitimate panic attacks because I was pissing or something and Mr. Electric was there to see it through my eyes.
What the hell is wrong with me? I don't think it's schizophrenia because I don't hear or see them doing anything. Am I just *really* insecure? I looked it up and I get results for children who grew up with helicopter parents watching their every move, but my parents weren't like that. I've always just assumed I had a weird irrational fear but as I get older the feeling of having no privacy takes its toll. I can't afford a therapist but if I have a condition or something, maybe I can learn how to cope with it.",4.8786659012629165,6.7035547552238794,5.532313432835824,78.34756314580945,70.1044776119403,8.138920780711826,31.690585533869122,8.730908602173464,2.8197853042479912,1413,63,240,25,26,457,174,335,0.11900000000000001,0.828,0.053,-0.9571,3,1,3,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,5,1,11,17,3,5,11,0,36,9,5,6,2,47,59,17,0,1,13,2,4,3,1,0,4,1,0,3,18,8,0,2,12,3,1,4,8,11,0,4,17,20,45,6,35,39,4,23,1,0,15,0,15,11,2,15,10,179,63,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905406964016368,0.0,0.0,0.23874011896019035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15740694031822947,0.0,0.0,0.10880416770809022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17490354492981647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676573332679017,0.0976590081345228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072682550704976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316923710548357,0.0,0.3223228869227104,0.09138800153405596,0.0859549550264564,0.0,0.0901607648014268,0.21524290337336516,0.193433582937957,0.06832514761511281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738911321324651,0.0,0.14990366585261158,0.0,0.0543543464204946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815410644814128,0.0,0.10779309286762034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27021309561838164,0.14017443960878267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031340960410119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608311184922927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20330010818705296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480805619184939,0.07273843655729903,0.0,0.11221278951527264,0.21239353155484608,0.0,0.0,0.0663046488936683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041059780346253,0.0,0.0915965653669801,0.0,0.1031159639652553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225387090857781,0.2950011686909088,0.0,0.0,0.10834133735832006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679266202679997,0.2286377995572435,0.0,0.0997732505430125,0.0,0.0,0.07911429500564304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208847507860653,0.0,0.0,0.1353887951388619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190928537076402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104526925188188,0.0,0.12256434350074068,0.0,0.0,0.05576838170157468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630011363686875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456719227638446,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rawrxdhoe,2020/02/14,"I fucked up, I’m behind on 2 months rent, my mom stays with me. We will get evicted. I feel embarrassed and I want to fucking kill myself I don’t know what to do

I owe loanshark £400 
I owe my landlord £600

I’m going to get kicked out of the house along with my mom, she knows nothing about this. The only other person in my family is my elder brother and he’s useless, he doesn’t work and does drugs.
I feel so stressed, I haven’t slept all night I just can’t. My stomach feels weird. I can’t take it anymore. Every day gets harder and harder and I have no friends. 

The only person I talk to is someone online from a group chat, and I told her all about it, but at the end of the day ranting doesn’t solve my problem.

I think i’m going to kill myself. I feel stressed and useless. I can’t do anything in life. I have no job, I dropped out of college, my boyfriend left me, I have no friends because of my anger issues, I have absolutely nothing. This life is worthless and I’m seriously contemplating suicide. 

When I’ve decided i’ll do it, I will come back and say a final goodbye to everyone here on reddit under this post. There’s no solving this at all",1.0648907103825138,3.0251422377049195,2.931557377049181,92.152718579235,81.54098360655738,5.214207650273224,23.69125683060109,6.21433560688645,0.4940060109289619,902,33,197,7,24,301,129,244,0.233,0.7170000000000001,0.05,-0.9931,5,0,1,0,0,4,27.0,1,0,0,1,8,16,5,3,7,0,19,7,2,0,3,31,44,12,3,2,2,3,4,0,2,2,3,1,2,2,9,16,0,0,8,1,3,3,11,14,0,0,2,5,37,2,27,40,3,25,0,3,0,2,17,11,2,0,8,122,46,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009275738131958,0.0,0.0,0.09965008420881116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311384877042356,0.0,0.0738178081408579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431180056602912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619128711781224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597021806676353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14043065169054553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725338454145188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202695878383518,0.11571055291631215,0.0,0.0,0.1141566920318632,0.0,0.24491515799252386,0.0,0.0,0.13265261133428072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18711392329711127,0.2238989935025314,0.1897999274393145,0.0,0.1376410769936019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13972627381610672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12639072563436518,0.1201671582289826,0.0,0.26794524664900915,0.0,0.13310024457892974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13156903824261146,0.0,0.17106461556432942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836477726092992,0.09665611437775927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11363856158091805,0.0,0.2323860113285293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18419496150545964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21146930504123507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597462517985765,0.0,0.0,0.11587065050942895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09629884789546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260259450911917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907014385173504,0.0,0.0,0.2774256473323303,0.0,0.0,0.13245723493213188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104765429154577,0.09733080939412346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759217685163278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571055291631215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142440736929079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881579096859101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DodoSandwich,2020/02/14,"I have no idea if these are delusions, paranoid thoughts or what, but I know no one’s trying to kill me in my sleep. I don’t know if this is normal or what, but when it’s night and I’m alone, I absolutely cannot lay on my stomach on my bed because thoughts of a demon/shadow man/ghost/intruder (they’re interchangeable), stabbing me in the back with a knife. I have full on visions of what it would be like and I can almost feel the pain of the blade in my back. I’m not diagnosed with anything and this has been happening for a while. I know for a fact that there isn’t anyone or anything trying to kill me, but something in my brain screams at me to turn around before they get a chance to kill me.",3.4097297297297327,3.971395648648653,4.294162162162163,90.63597297297301,72.24324324324324,7.271351351351353,26.28648648648649,7.1686216300943375,0.9591545945945948,548,17,126,5,10,177,86,148,0.22399999999999998,0.7240000000000001,0.052000000000000005,-0.9831,0,1,1,0,0,3,16.0,0,0,1,0,5,6,3,0,8,0,12,5,3,0,1,26,23,13,3,4,9,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,1,0,9,6,0,0,7,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,3,2,18,1,20,18,1,15,0,0,0,0,1,10,0,6,6,88,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944934922732246,0.16491788390492412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11133976570904566,0.0,0.26207120619610913,0.14175157464801216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448814655258396,0.0,0.0970672637751622,0.0,0.13549598057594045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17775724791293468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16161865087273922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051324213674882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08319293173856479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408096583576307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17975523976709096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5285048267245529,0.0,0.2625317021963413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777934450070813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14942985317251106,0.15601502173099802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079007407366282,0.0,0.1694356710183164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15934849673796966,0.0,0.0,0.1225857279054319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528272252218885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21621818856015151,0.17320032317616316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131149099157782,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fucked-cunt,2020/02/14,"I can’t feel anything anymore. I’m going to start off w the fact I’m pretty fucking high rn but I just had to get this out.
I don’t understand how to explain it but it feels like I’ve essentially trained myself to not feel over the last couple years. 
I mean I can empathise and sympathise w others but I don’t know how I feel. I just feel numb to everything that happens around me but I constantly put up a facade of being happy for my mum and friends sakes. I don’t really know how else to explain it.
Thank you for reading",0.14374517374517734,2.450693702702708,2.3850257400257417,92.0847972972973,89.45045045045046,5.333590733590733,21.442084942084943,6.868970318607317,0.6274138996139,415,15,89,6,14,140,71,111,0.028999999999999998,0.8029999999999999,0.168,0.9403,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,6,6,1,0,3,0,7,2,0,3,1,26,26,9,0,0,7,1,5,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,11,1,0,2,5,2,0,0,1,5,14,4,14,24,0,12,0,0,0,1,5,6,1,0,5,56,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18764354175598136,0.0,0.0,0.1557021018166054,0.16843527702919855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20446668234399384,0.0,0.0,0.20935510616023514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805904533890194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17004799320937075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4783463703135803,0.135170267195275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14618166842419614,0.17491979138681013,0.09885339573159282,0.0,0.1075312938988469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16731605185161114,0.2014154852541414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19990869080460205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079675897695947,0.154229812265976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243749491573787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061030323572291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19249260619259773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19020634771072267,0.0,0.0,0.18925925024281845,0.0,0.12121152040676313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339224301223348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17419734956466615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19697225060032306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184377939099565
mentalhealth,hnr-2000,2020/02/14,"Experiencing awful intrusive thoughts. How can I get rid of them? Right the thoughts: 

The corona virus is a way that people are being tested. It will eventually turn all of the bad people into zombie like creatures and the good people will not turn into these creatures. The bad ones keep passing on the infection to others. Then when everyone has been judged, the storms will come and wipe all the bad people away. I dreamt that I got the virus but didn’t become the creature thing but there was still a chance of me turning at a later point. In my mind this was a sign that I am being judged, and the news lately is another sign. We’re all facing judgement and those of us who are deemed bad will have an awful death. I literally feel like there are judged and infected watching my every move and it’s freaking me out so much.

Now: my mind is forming solutions to these thoughts. Like killing myself and my family before the infected get to us and we can be judged. (I’m not going to act on these thoughts but they’re there) I’ve never experienced this before and it is really freaking me the hell out. 

Idk what’s going on.

Like part of me genuinely believes all this but then another part of me is like it’s not real you’re over reacting. 

Any advice on stopping unwanted intrusive thoughts ??? Or what’s going on with me atm. I think I’m just paranoid but I’m also aware these could be delusions. I have a 7-year history of mental illness - PTSD, anxiety, low mood, self harm, suicide attempt, eating issues and so on",2.7745918367346936,5.279475098639459,3.804789115646261,85.23902040816328,78.62585034013605,6.64108843537415,23.74557823129252,7.793537801064563,1.3860770068027215,1205,41,225,20,30,388,156,294,0.23399999999999999,0.7040000000000001,0.062,-0.9963,0,0,0,0,0,2,33.0,3,0,1,1,11,17,2,0,19,2,27,6,1,2,5,51,48,23,3,2,10,0,1,5,0,4,4,0,0,1,20,17,1,2,7,0,1,7,5,10,0,1,10,4,22,6,26,29,8,34,1,1,1,0,6,17,1,1,14,156,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383204458387373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678913311212515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529857111359838,0.2013758604813468,0.07345692533316478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021626972210924,0.0,0.3206990002787595,0.0,0.10604927200337656,0.16341609606558968,0.10818443960718882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271485392725965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666612742292245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825495698429368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090307085731406,0.09175358329910907,0.0,0.0,0.09052143721992106,0.0,0.04855184506449965,0.06859847045447197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033555288636642,0.0,0.16371534451717895,0.08053909055480621,0.07679793962349278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022250936018752,0.0,0.0853491816848941,0.1062346341296601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831752655212323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345586383543195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967680632005766,0.0,0.1939106398675507,0.0,0.0,0.10205668741047684,0.07058756259959108,0.0,0.07405844705833091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650673095202357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20796595143691693,0.0,0.26627955632080536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077226963531873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122451267988502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929459078322083,0.06151445191236275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200266316844565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017237603461228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668366712636736,0.08027908300055188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503299511242513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379306114663268,0.061527320392847674,0.0,0.3811555696083962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31333461550415376,0.0,0.0,0.2310064125733676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621816576382551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06183532128807236
mentalhealth,MortisFlame,2020/02/14,"I need to be healthier; how do I stop using food as a crutch? As a child I was morbidly obese. I got healthier then gained back most of the weight in my 20s following trauma in my teens and the depression it brought on. My eating disorders have ranged from anorexia (I once starved myself to the point I sitting down hurt with the bones sticking through my ass) to binge eating (I used to eat two extra large pizzas in a single sitting on a regular basis). 

Recently, I started going to the gym. Over the last year I’ve lost almost 100 lbs and I’m in amazing shape. Maybe the best shape I’ve ever been in. But my eating habits still aren’t that great. I drink A LOT of soda. And I eat fast food and fried stuff all the time. I don’t even really enjoy these things, they’re just such a source of comfort. I honestly feel like I can’t end my day without drinking an extra large coke from QuikTrip or stopping at Taco Bell on the way home. I know it’s bad for me, but (just like staying up too late) it makes me feel like I have some kind of control over my life. 

How do I break this cycle? I’m under a lot of stress due to my home life. I’ve got college out of the way, but I’m afraid it’s going to get worse when I start working full-time and I’ll regress to my old ways. I just wish I could feel happy without sugary soft drinks or junk food.",1.8987234042553176,3.469939173758867,3.1776063829787238,93.20875,77.47517730496455,6.118439716312058,22.03368794326241,6.816661863887847,0.3845645390070924,1045,29,235,10,24,339,167,282,0.084,0.799,0.11699999999999999,0.8795,1,0,3,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,5,12,18,0,2,18,0,11,20,2,6,2,39,33,16,0,3,10,0,5,3,0,0,3,1,2,1,9,7,16,3,4,4,0,4,5,7,0,1,6,6,31,11,38,25,9,48,0,3,0,1,1,18,1,7,22,140,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144277847758754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021866728794791,0.07624754308153345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583364711209806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242201340896183,0.07291078361320076,0.0,0.0,0.058893194558217565,0.0,0.07865291313039721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465947518320652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683735370076421,0.0,0.4672106279796431,0.0,0.0,0.08088152110639353,0.0,0.0,0.06031533230031234,0.08260325546318067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13852087702271124,0.1304766108221903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3312698591644062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04771040374097104,0.0,0.10379737405547468,0.0,0.14607227848980858,0.1006795099530588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721076398074127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18320078732081452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775886856125106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509467657324633,0.050186529251280615,0.07443716584186295,0.10301179941427044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12900260792213974,0.13384153889488498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09968546604308967,0.15527228108678615,0.0,0.0,0.060956135590758576,0.0,0.09174220055811418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771187472184834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582391953839647,0.0972517450770444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632596339385512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058501283985891425,0.0,0.09016648679945824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292721036808357,0.0973338940191177,0.0729274641677755,0.15269353092613275,0.10460559564669288,0.0,0.10453839680868422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066827989925515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05324883801531839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920538503083729,0.0,0.0,0.1577405763131012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21745429350093226,0.0,0.11120192954886997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501233291119197,0.17605649718102584,0.0,0.06648131304612298,0.0,0.0930618534205274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058806436188133374
mentalhealth,Hardyz1000,2020/02/14,"Frustration with psychiatrists :( need help Hi everyone,
I’ve had depression anxiety for years since I was a kid. I’m now 21 but I held it in me for so long as I didn’t want to go as a kid to the doctors and tell my parents. When I was 18 I finally saw a therapist and psychiatrist. Did therapy and didn’t help me, got prescribed anti depressant was scared to take them originally and also the one I had seen was a bit dodgy, wouldn’t answer phone calls to make future bookings so I stopped seeing him. Found a new psychiatrist who scored me the highest you could get depression and anxiety then proceeds to tell me I’ve got adhd. I was like fine I’ve now got adhd and was given medication for it. It did help with concentration but my anxiety was increased and depression was still present 2.5 years later. I keep telling him week after week I’m struggling everyday with depression and anxiety (stemmed from having eczema, ibs and eating disorder as a kid) which led me to be bullied every single day at primary and high school. I have no confidence in myself at all, and have lost my job due to it. He proceeds to tell me all my depression and anxiety came from my adhd, I call complete bs on that because if it did why hasn’t adhd med helped my anxiety depression? I want to go see another psychiatrist but it’s so expensive in aus and as a broke student who’s struggling everyday to even get out of bed and go find a job or go university I just wanted to stop my adhd med for antidepressant and go enjoy life like everyone else :(",4.460788681517158,5.796871695364237,5.978868151715832,76.64685129440095,70.45695364238411,10.126670680313063,31.27694160144491,10.33465798735191,3.416060927152317,1220,53,233,35,22,415,157,302,0.257,0.653,0.09,-0.9959,3,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,1,1,10,17,1,3,11,0,22,4,0,3,2,44,50,30,0,7,6,1,0,2,0,1,3,0,1,3,10,20,1,4,3,1,1,8,5,13,0,1,25,4,31,4,33,22,5,41,0,9,4,0,23,8,0,2,27,143,41,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43115994663323975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738006767623265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523825334703975,0.329340611835042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043739367857317364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833462660589369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653367773960269,0.08206520050832011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523063203343308,0.0,0.0,0.0572881526553832,0.0,0.0,0.04627411958858027,0.0,0.4325993919742056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223403581747092,0.07344123696619237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342023347303381,0.05993960904040178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047391535148099184,0.0,0.06045417486650479,0.1371242676109441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860083508998672,0.0655800500461701,0.0,0.0,0.07867239082346085,0.0,0.0,0.07497494217763012,0.0,0.2038916438501058,0.0,0.1721599448149815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923754769003332,0.07580995282436552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14240562461883055,0.06377649574503401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050680576516585696,0.07010882919156504,0.0,0.0,0.06349828334292337,0.0,0.0,0.07832581016404791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04789503318921076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594006466748168,0.07228261549269434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05320321663564053,0.0,0.0692985519024835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048621028425074965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967213138178476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183629327421087,0.07261687895424931,0.1143541467376748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059354015724713376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057301259058983575,0.11997580982797168,0.0,0.15002158905647292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05394859240475815,0.0,0.250857726327306,0.0,0.08205469270451425,0.0833096301605305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269636083729968,0.0,0.11511029128835328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474504135418131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924119019578026
mentalhealth,readyheartsx,2020/02/14,"Deleted all social media apps. Time to take a much needed break No more social media for me for a while. I just don’t feel like it’s important to me now... & I’ve always wanted to see what it’s like without it. I think people who live without it are happier. 
But honestly it was just sensory overload. Just too much at once.

Wish me luck",0.7757142857142867,3.0772285000000004,2.9939285714285724,89.18232142857146,85.42857142857143,5.785714285714287,20.17857142857143,7.1686216300943375,0.6534285714285719,265,8,54,4,8,90,50,70,0.098,0.698,0.204,0.792,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,13,10,2,0,3,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,5,4,8,9,4,5,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,5,37,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18519243887852474,0.2411497740945568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253587313261224,0.1590009351426337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174686554789697,0.0,0.1965295345669913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272227030258081,0.1650295993004704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370251390507953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429898867961406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773559965716767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4537552759958114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16734165996680533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426110730235015,0.0,0.0,0.12977981243293174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13127497884843667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559394979555891,0.4290906625075937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bluedaisy0303,2020/02/14,"I can't do life today Today is hard. 
I'm studying a course online and i went and had a meeting with my workplace supervisor. 
I came home to get stuck into my assignments and it all became so overwhelming. 
I couldn't just move on to another question. 
Now I'm questioning myself. Do I really want to study this anymore? 
I've been on bed for a few hours on and off crying, shit gets hard sometimes.",1.9978750000000003,4.2453850375,3.9450000000000043,84.59000000000002,79.875,7.0,23.75,8.07648339933343,1.53825,313,11,61,6,8,106,58,80,0.17300000000000001,0.805,0.021,-0.8522,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,1,3,0,7,2,1,0,1,13,15,5,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,5,2,8,0,10,9,2,12,0,1,0,0,3,5,1,2,4,39,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107011683576264,0.0,0.0,0.19927664918147345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298197108437559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22072112031205893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20996377788711246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3600022247690092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20155734599631764,0.0,0.1978835999285283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192855641966912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21356545143690026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4501934253586837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872612296064587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20626012142171612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987329664034984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3809317385541252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851852585190775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862716763619845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lil_baby_aidy,2020/02/14,"I was asleep for 17 hours, should I be concerned? I woke up at 5pm today when I went to sleep at midnight. I didn't wake up once during this so it was super disorienting realizing that it was 5pm instead of 5am.

On top of this, I was only awake 4 hours before going to sleep at midnight and had a 10 hour sleep before that.

For clarification:

Slept 10 hours (10am-8pm)
Was awake 4 hours (8pm-midnight)
Slept for 17 hours (midnight-5pm)

Why did this happen?",1.8555676328502424,3.9933436630434787,3.274927536231885,89.78987922705316,79.76086956521739,5.393236714975847,21.09178743961353,6.42735559955562,0.20915555555555576,355,10,75,3,9,116,54,92,0.0,0.9229999999999999,0.077,0.7449,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,0,10,7,7,0,0,4,16,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,12,0,6,1,13,2,0,17,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,8,41,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355232305522173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865150732801547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237981336559299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8177309605018745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473832341172992,0.0,0.10525354553353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4154765983740576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117967522574775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829100616119354,0.12487748390181057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LHWDLT,2020/02/14,"I tend to get very anxious or depressed when I’m not doing something stimulating or productive, but also need some downtime that’s not work or school related. Suggestions? I get too anxious to be motivated to do art or play music, but I can’t hold focus long enough to be stimulated by internet scrolling or Netflix. Suggestions? For those with this issue, have video games helped?",6.494347826086957,8.301481623188407,6.722434782608698,71.44539130434784,66.10144927536231,10.157681159420287,35.53913043478261,10.355215969177356,4.125838260869566,308,15,50,8,5,99,53,69,0.115,0.7509999999999999,0.134,0.5298,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,3,0,16,11,9,0,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,5,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,7,9,2,2,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,6,2,33,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21114124400271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5965477417049856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22740493463846256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27280910995401536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758850451299333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697085047694816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755742179363379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23365442182311585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19577169913391004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672080877371505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20325987057262496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21784884020102185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192213842389647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crapdick69,2020/02/14,"Why have I lost most of my motivation for school? This has been going on for some time now, but just recently its gotten worse. I was doing really good for a while, but since my grandma passed i’ve lost most desire to succeed. I don’t feel like her death impacted me that much on that level. Ive lost all vision of my future and desire to succeed.",3.7802816901408463,4.724025901408453,5.071943661971833,83.99101408450704,71.67605633802816,7.933521126760564,22.65070422535211,8.238735603445708,1.1062822535211259,273,6,56,4,5,91,53,71,0.175,0.524,0.301,0.9215,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,6,2,7,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,1,1,12,13,4,1,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,6,1,9,4,9,7,5,10,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,3,6,40,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11729410184203347,0.16572379420401911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183738103321094,0.19457057249318666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333181994839098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7596880493241832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705291476634571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860984948729064,0.0,0.2290484433691543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347722289975778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19189305258392447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13526714737984233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093223764799661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23640349557401505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_shittythrowaway_,2020/02/14,"Wondering if I have a mental illness Hi, I'm a 14 year old boy and I'm wondering if I have a mental illness. Usually, I have suicidal thoughts multiple times a day. I'm always thinking about how others see me. I hate myself, I think in ugly, dumb, etc. I self harm almost daily. I know I shouldn't ask redditors about my mental health. Also, how can I tell my parents that I have these issues?",0.9713194444444468,3.287558937500002,3.659166666666668,84.66027777777782,84.625,6.555555555555558,22.63888888888889,7.793537801064563,1.4342222222222218,305,11,59,6,9,107,52,80,0.301,0.6990000000000001,0.0,-0.9741,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,2,0,4,0,6,3,0,2,0,13,18,6,1,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,14,0,3,16,1,6,0,0,1,0,6,1,1,5,5,37,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17573897265543134,0.0,0.0,0.14034814397124298,0.1460309511054185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640698115332093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318367267891274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19573008703219866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732709746238442,0.0,0.18654943286832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831775226880611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645079949012604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5305914072266704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18415885273676333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19487317144274008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985163228289146,0.0,0.1830858935875565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919696879276508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15339567255977046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22490800118947188,0.0,0.139328247606935,0.102336086498084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19328963634052448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806468526892048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130169364195635
mentalhealth,CyberSamantha,2020/02/14,"I can't be enough I have been working in IT for a while, studied IT in college and I did 2 apprenticeships to get to my second line engineer job. 

I want to die everyday, all my work colleagues joke around, me not being very good and me not doing enough work and I don't know what to do. I spoke about this with HR and I was told this is kinda of not a problem as is clearly just them joking. 

I am not too sure I can't keep on overworking myself and undergo this treatment. I have been told from the new manager to actually respond in  a jokey way and I have been trying. 

Although, I just feel I am not respected which impact my performance and my actually ability to grow. I literally want to die when I think about it at night.

I am like even nice to them.  All the time. 

Any help , advise please.",1.8427642276422769,3.721747341463416,3.783756097560975,87.40839837398376,78.6341463414634,7.300162601626017,23.73821138211381,8.238735603445708,1.3578704065040652,620,21,134,12,15,210,98,164,0.091,0.7509999999999999,0.158,0.7315,2,0,0,0,0,2,15.0,0,0,2,4,8,8,0,0,5,0,20,0,0,0,4,28,30,11,2,3,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,9,0,1,3,2,0,1,8,1,0,1,8,2,25,7,21,20,4,14,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,1,7,103,33,7,0.0,0.0,0.3287985509695505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456318725354117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499711510763494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3496838399694879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34814243513774024,0.0,0.11127071922686116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518186574025748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801693924903209,0.0,0.0,0.1413019420656005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129197313898843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16717728412647995,0.14974101449008267,0.0,0.0,0.09258493640531563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230435903711689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627062657386523,0.0,0.15809466061381516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18492593462415646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611999563576504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15877794626331626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794671012190847,0.0,0.0,0.09823433409034572,0.0,0.0,0.3219544552174801,0.0,0.11437788505181805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900273662470464,0.19873214312996024,0.1337210883425318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3679374664284111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imallamagirl,2020/02/14,"This is messing with my mental health. I’m worried how I’ll be after tomorrow Bit of a long one but I need to get it off my chest. Apologies for the formatting, I’m on mobile. 

Almost four years ago I found my biological dad just before my 18th birthday. He didn’t know he had a daughter but he was over the moon and things were great for a few months- we were planning to meet, spoke every week or so, he told his other kids about me and I was getting to know him and his family. Unfortunately it didn’t work out and we haven’t spoken in years. 

Through finding him I also found my grandparents and an auntie, who told me she has another sister but my grandparents don’t really speak to her. The only people from the family I stayed in touch with were my aunties, we didn’t speak much but the occasional message was enough. I’ve always wanted to meet them but life just got in the way. 

Anyway, I’m going to my aunties wedding in a few days and it’ll be the first time I’ve met any of my dads family. I don’t know if my other auntie will be there but I’m pretty sure no one else from my dads family will be. 
This is such a big deal and I honestly can’t believe I’m finally going to meet them but honestly, I’m so nervous about what to expect and my mind is going overtime. I’m overthinking every little detail and I’m dreading the unknown of whether the rest of the family will be there- I know some of them blame my mum for ‘taking me’ from my dad but there’s so much more to that story that even I’m not sure of. 
I’m also terrified of how I’ll be after this weekend. If it doesn’t go well I don’t know what I’ll do. This is my family and it’s all I’ve ever wanted. 

So, yeah. This is a huge weekend for me and I don’t know what to expect. I can’t believe it’s finally happening but I’ve also built it up so much in my head that now I’m just all over.",0.9127247670297968,2.70070937406484,3.3858754429715217,89.58293181519885,81.19451371571071,6.415566347289671,20.02894080588004,7.475848149327749,0.53797855361596,1453,38,324,22,38,505,174,401,0.061,0.856,0.084,0.872,2,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,3,0,3,3,24,9,0,2,17,1,35,4,2,2,5,58,70,34,0,7,17,7,1,0,0,4,2,3,0,1,22,17,0,0,9,2,0,4,13,3,1,4,17,4,43,6,42,43,12,38,0,0,0,0,38,14,0,5,18,221,65,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080627816623978,0.0,0.09128180797509736,0.0,0.0,0.2186976309363621,0.07585095688115523,0.0,0.0,0.061990728059665136,0.09558736119327248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756894675498083,0.20540823670733885,0.0,0.0,0.09952118655359904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587895224336483,0.09398014104327014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615101101165915,0.0,0.0,0.09419082839800344,0.0,0.0602091567278955,0.08245784553841015,0.15360949494538498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5156152457156834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997187887705002,0.08331697842481592,0.07753915101292319,0.0,0.19990060648786512,0.0,0.0,0.09525283429057464,0.0,0.2072293104954909,0.0,0.07290757071024327,0.10050227965037743,0.0,0.0,0.08061092916042974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355465174851164,0.0968969446654098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30058910297710345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438775964972296,0.0,0.0913645030030532,0.0,0.08067217239954154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186606365844664,0.0,0.09204383448906513,0.0,0.07276163618876448,0.0,0.20103538207107516,0.0675926787100911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235423630641438,0.06932994804903737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319764461237111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274070042878896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058398301757701165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716255314244668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17183112175289306,0.0,0.06853965049236682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06056148301859177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05315510188486555,0.0,0.0,0.1742112065790796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075349816710255,0.07235716657340219,0.07312164026250316,0.0,0.08196220398390561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636428324294542,0.09257561601911307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11740583357581776
mentalhealth,bchristel11,2020/02/14,"A grocery list of questions I ask myself everyday Does anyone else feel like self-demeaning jokes are hardwired in your library of jokes? I am pretty sure  over 80% of what comes out of my mouth is putting down whatever I do. I noticed my outlook on life has drastically changed over the past year and I am starting to think it has to do with how I view myself. The question I have is how do people not care what people think? What do you do to feel more confident? How do you get through each day without tearing yourself down? 

I am always reassuring my friends or strangers that nobody is judging them, but then I secretly judge myself 24/7. Why is it so fucking easy to be a hypocrite about something I am constantly telling others to do. What do you think I am doing wrong and why can't I get these thoughts of extremely low self-worth out of my mind?

I can't even invest my time in one thing for too long because I constantly convince myself that I'm no good at it. I have been trying to get into reading books, which has been really nice to get out of my head (when that works). It's hard to focus on reading when a steady flow of thoughts pulse through my mind, which makes finishing a book that much more of an accomplishment. Why is it so hard to read a sentence without losing track of what you just read. 

I have so many more questions, but this is getting too long for my comfort. I guess I just want some answers, but I know we are all going through our own shit. If anyone reading this has similar thoughts or questions then hopefully you find comfort in knowing you aren't alone. My hope is for someone to answer at least one of these questions. Then maybe that answer will resonate with me and whoever else feels the same way.",6.590868961259452,6.3286863489736085,6.254634974533107,82.18616298811548,65.27565982404693,9.055780212995831,34.956166075011566,8.371475516178862,2.6314304985337245,1379,58,272,16,19,429,180,341,0.065,0.7979999999999999,0.13699999999999998,0.9665,0,1,1,0,0,0,29.0,2,7,1,3,14,19,2,0,9,0,37,5,3,4,2,58,65,20,0,4,11,0,5,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,23,12,0,0,21,9,1,4,7,5,0,2,5,6,43,14,47,58,10,37,0,2,1,1,20,16,2,12,17,198,66,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393654541075918,0.0,0.0,0.06743462067154618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133348922406536,0.08303856472602845,0.0,0.0,0.07576466098893682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049403318796275034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262917160046661,0.0,0.08573319617276028,0.06981173333870147,0.0,0.1751582993717551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226630365370346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092164611652013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540276227159334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05352841693560805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293397013282108,0.057897437998522865,0.0,0.0,0.07407222092636162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06261394802071069,0.07492333918303007,0.21170921938199014,0.0,0.04605884526672783,0.06797537861939787,0.0,0.0,0.08927846798931667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14519797795332925,0.0,0.08317393362095978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609888119203495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907869226146091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05724336681306249,0.039593723099555916,0.0,0.0,0.14344175916030466,0.0,0.09066686088068948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409711455189455,0.08216531124142054,0.08141901196222838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16366150986466374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059576241306853385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226847489759313,0.0,0.0,0.10983424247567763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736511806127111,0.11237061118286903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824502974171792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147102504131172,0.453935910339901,0.0,0.4053267754050699,0.0,0.05191849238056822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909193141493997,0.0,0.08318990967919007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866782980316277,0.06239118689503165,0.0,0.0,0.0573629523378676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076382467614271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07083552434207903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05384164950039879,0.15578806031940853,0.0,0.19301827705187696,0.04725707202322516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05502316478052192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047801510989961514,0.06432849737664302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193872528473352,0.0,0.0,0.15624593657887967,0.0,0.05900057758848031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860826127454231,0.0,0.0521893076722605
mentalhealth,GoUODucks8,2020/02/14,"Anxiety/Social Anxiety and its Grip.... I want to write what I am dealing with in my current life in a few sentences, but will likely not be able. I am a 37m, single, and rent a house w/ my sister. I currently work independently delivering amazon packages. I am doing this job because it enables me to not have to engage with people. I don't like to engage with people because I have severe social anxiety and generalized anxiety. These last 4-5 months my hands and feet will just sweat profusely on top of my other symptoms such as rapid heartbeat, shallow breathing, tense upper neck/shoulder area, and just overall walking around feeling in constant fear (with no real reason as to why).

​

I have dealt with anxiety starting around the age of 21 or 22. In the beginning it was awful: Panic attacks along with some actual hallucinations in the first week getting off of drugs.  I self medicated with alcohol and drugs in my teens I believe to cope with that because at that young age I couldn't really identify feelings:just that something is off.  I kept going in and out of Alcoholics Anonymous until I got a DUI in 2007. I had more serious arrests prior to that, but that was when I had enough. I had to tell my Fiance's daughter why my car was missing one day on the couch and that really shook me up. I obtained 10 years sobriety from that day on until 2017.

​

I eventually divorced in 2013. Looking back at my marriage I see so many things where I went wrong. Near the end I wasn't as active in my recovery anymore. It was from 5-7 meetings a week down to only 1 a week. I found that I wasn't growing emotionally anymore and was going back to counter-productive behaviors.  I was starting to isolate myself again and isolate from people that care about me. My isolation manifests so many unhealthy things. And obviously it makes the anxiety 10 times worse.

​

Sometime in 2017 I decided to drink again. Fortunately, I haven't had any serious ramifications from it. I have only drank 8-9 times since 2017 till now.  I just don't like how it makes me feel anymore for the most part: Shitty next day w/ a lil bout of depression. I have questioned if I am really an alcoholic at times because of this. However, I do have an addicting personality and know ultimately I shouldn't partake.

​

When I got sober originally my sister offered me a career in appraising. She had her own appraisal company and offered to train me and I took her up on it. I went from making $9/hour to $50 per claim over night. A few more years into it I was making $4000-$6000/month. It really boosted my self esteem. I was able to learn a skill and it finally gave me some direction in my work life. I was not rich by no means, but wasn't stressing either in finances. Somewhere around 2015 my sisters company was not doing well and she had to sell it. I was working for another appraisal company in addition at the time. Eventually I had to leave the other company also because work became just too slow. Keep in mind what  I liked about these jobs was that I had limited contact with people. Meet with the shop or owner and only took around 30 minutes to inspect and then I was gone:But was obtaining decent money too. That is when I signed up to do a ""Gig"" job delivering packages. This was in 2017. It was only suppose to be temporary until I found something else. But that something else hasn't happened. That is because I went to one job interview at a shop and my anxiety was so bad I remember the collar of my shirt was shaking. I decided right there to not go through with that again. I basically said to myself I am giving up on life in general. 

​

It has been a pretty pathetic life since. I am obese and that brings on even more anxiety. I have no self confidence in myself. I have just gone through bankruptcy and my car is now a salvaged title. I barely make ends meet.

About 5-6 days ago my sisters best friends daughter moved in with us. She just lost her 2 kids due to drugs and possible mental illness. I had recently lived with my sisters best friend and her daughter for about 3 years. During that time I got to know them and for the most part enjoyed being around them. We got to know each other during that time. So when she moved in the first day it was nice to see a familiar face even though it was not good for the circumstances. I had heard from my sister some of the horror stories recently with the daughter (25-26 years old). It seems in the last 6 months her life has gone upside down. Her ex is in prison for ""Lewd acts with a child"", lives with her mom, had 2 kids with that guy, and is completely dependent on her mom. I think the situation has took a toll on her and quickly. 

​

The night after she moved in 5-6 days ago her and I drank and fooled around. She wanted to have sex, but I told her that was not going to happen. Thus far it hasn't happened either. But there have been some intense moments. She is sleeping in my bed every night now. I told her we can't have a relationship because of a magnitude of reasons. However, after the first night I started developing feelings.  I haven't had any intimate contact with anyone since my divorce. It felt so good and was intoxicating. But with being in AA and being older I know also this is never going to be a successful relationship and is likely going to end really bad.

​

I have attempted to talk to her about getting sober and that her kids should be her number one priority. But that just goes over head like nothing. She seems to not care what so ever. It is hurtful to watch because regardless of this ""Fling"" that is going on right now I do ultimately care for her and her well being. She likes to smoke pot and when she does it is disturbing. The effects it has on her are worrisome. It is not a typical somewhat vegetative state or relaxed it is full on psychotic. Last night she was just laughing every 10-20 minutes at nothing and sounded somewhat evil. I told her yesterday that we needed to end our ""Fling"" because it isn't healthy. What is sad is it feels like a real ""break up"". I am going through emotions as if I was with someone for a year or more. All it is showing me is really how unhealthy I am right now. Also, I have no control over what she does with her life: Nobody does ever. My sister is going to kick her out she said in the next day or two and while I fear what the future will bring for her I have to realize that I truly am powerless. 

​

Since yesterday I called a doctor to start getting on meds again for anxiety and will meet this coming Tuesday. I have made contact and am awaiting a return phone call to start therapy also. My old boss at the other appraisal company called me a couple of days ago and see if I wanted to work again appraising and I took the job. I am considering going back to AA....... I really shouldn't consider it and should just go do it.  I get so caught up with my weight and anxiety and I keep pushing that idea off right now. I need to start exercising.

​

I feel for the first time in many years and I am just the very very very beginning of getting my life back and taking control again. What more should I do? 

​

I have a small sliver of hope again, but it is small. Lots of work to do now....

​

All day in my head its been : You have to fight, you have to fight, you have to fight.

God relieve me from despair and anxiety.",3.7563133549042784,5.5596557346657525,4.884795815860481,81.94263812800057,72.9765678842178,7.923468326928242,28.285583291476364,8.619666818011675,2.197816101110865,5865,232,1114,109,118,1928,502,1451,0.149,0.782,0.069,-0.9989,12,1,11,0,5,0,213.0,5,3,2,24,72,53,5,7,56,1,132,36,9,18,6,202,227,92,0,16,38,14,9,8,2,9,21,4,3,9,77,84,9,6,26,6,7,35,28,24,4,8,71,18,172,29,195,138,29,234,0,6,5,1,107,84,0,22,121,808,249,18,0.0545275964089065,0.0,0.026605534197373947,0.029721564330614993,0.0,0.0,0.07250313631438672,0.08741012649021697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872113982958491,0.0,0.3249434536021357,0.3644134888881592,0.03708063538901078,0.02858846959172625,0.20856731002109447,0.0,0.0811150854531004,0.019063481619436603,0.0,0.0,0.14562336397708253,0.0,0.031016506387267693,0.0,0.08385671170158157,0.045528265382213336,0.14957782498807834,0.0,0.0,0.030716964333414212,0.05722334834578693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351815872638013,0.0,0.08339177791901964,0.0,0.0,0.023485348051462004,0.02858557370190158,0.029462480217257142,0.061157335948221425,0.0,0.03016687414749792,0.0,0.1582460492770959,0.02810777879942948,0.023482269443460727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027905652728305384,0.07157620060863287,0.0,0.0,0.026708142803984168,0.09485205070231034,0.0,0.045550809971292516,0.06133620674618944,0.09659053154044044,0.028170791617849845,0.0,0.036014963166073166,0.049323332715664726,0.04594185173045283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06135870553419634,0.06892697778824504,0.019477262884825864,0.02617752181077327,0.029866158289050523,0.0,0.09276229129996066,0.0,0.059786695004487515,0.04212788572396999,0.0,0.07122104645026775,0.02615391954192216,0.17044109295473656,0.0457351608235018,0.08722140007786372,0.0,0.0,0.026995446630656318,0.07232786013636518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055961045127482886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027079103322054036,0.026849349357455945,0.031458762620322656,0.029186459861153858,0.030777509611904588,0.0,0.0,0.13527556422421916,0.04846663307995306,0.0,0.0,0.059933881932987876,0.06667090316190695,0.0,0.028868425716823867,0.0,0.0,0.13480058870675524,0.1065577172404386,0.0,0.04814886662094077,0.0,0.022894723928701382,0.0,0.029761656371709324,0.023178706270776055,0.0,0.02579766507211597,0.09099398504167587,0.08292363647093585,0.0,0.02969826890097209,0.030283933621804333,0.02746540839394216,0.027475496076315283,0.0,0.02752866415127821,0.06386206189140207,0.06528511084496211,0.08693130838103566,0.0,0.04043152182053883,0.02102752193511969,0.0,0.0579907173829661,0.12792613857269144,0.0,0.05232069937175336,0.0,0.05721753990214255,0.0,0.0554239657679428,0.08294138835314402,0.0,0.031988192879442316,0.0,0.05904807323536612,0.0,0.0756051393705239,0.023805696978408758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03073583601456585,0.0,0.027737084286310738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03054169360232682,0.0,0.0,0.06206434232340768,0.12226121081457332,0.05606345066671351,0.05383942319554949,0.058542232159872136,0.030884568605818168,0.0931325387989622,0.05186823087880541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517715193928897,0.049639875857369904,0.08532626262208072,0.03080033163940667,0.0,0.0902115824441622,0.03064565149017104,0.027283487793457253,0.02779200885837238,0.023100527744263997,0.0629670115393623,0.026964593557719227,0.0,0.11578474017066755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03123058872844244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028337525456314037,0.020498983228197758,0.0219136082624186,0.023829761331241543,0.0,0.031178529310366337,0.0,0.036225712146319006,0.017469541025492034,0.02678654331001101,0.0,0.11128417987871804,0.0,0.0,0.07815518264627777,0.1211643318815228,0.0,0.0,0.026632769260929227,0.0,0.03279499233702453,0.0,0.0,0.06748646644381892,0.04824268368492195,0.0,0.06560812317796813,0.03319996130302408,0.049026857672678684,0.0758214422395022,0.04920267453396157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909021881866845,0.0,0.027784139581781258,0.0,0.029808683393825263,0.3644134888881592,0.10534195298958944
mentalhealth,heyyooo2020,2020/02/14,"UK help please Hi all,

Not sure if this is the right place to ask but I feel this has been coming for a long time. Made an account for some advice.

Posting here for options as a last resort sort of thing. 27 year old male uk.

Just come home at 12pm from a work night out which was fun and had a breakdown and cried my eyes out for 1 hour none stop. I feel extremely lonely I haven't cried really since I was 14. At least not like this. I can't connect.

I don't want to worry my parents or brother since they have their own problems and worry a lot, asked a friend to talk but she's asleep. Can any anyone recommend a mental health sevice in the UK? NHS or private I don't mind paying or should I just see my GP? Feel like I need someone to talk to, I've been very stoic until now and this is very sudden although it's been a long time coming. It's very worrying. Who can I speak to in the UK? Have to go to work tomorrow, thanks.

All help appreciated,

L",0.06698849104859406,2.163423691176476,1.925012787723788,97.05886189258312,86.59803921568627,4.724296675191817,16.712702472293266,6.0469075449839425,-0.5787243819266839,739,16,173,6,23,243,127,204,0.11199999999999999,0.7140000000000001,0.174,0.9231,1,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,2,4,8,0,0,12,0,18,3,2,1,3,36,32,13,0,5,10,2,3,2,1,1,1,1,1,1,9,9,0,1,3,0,2,4,7,2,0,0,7,6,16,6,22,24,7,27,0,1,2,0,16,8,0,8,16,101,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501754434652495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004175260307382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230034159492305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200719427860844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041709073446952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585813917542652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17854179830281888,0.0840867067598463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093667817266947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689305692143559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125112279136932,0.0,0.0,0.15778704172941546,0.0,0.11806522858423595,0.0,0.11591327690462858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594326671634043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500701581606608,0.0,0.0,0.20832605995340864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006647693715624,0.0,0.11137297426414737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186164603985672,0.0,0.11884599615802326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872749302425501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104558455126847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350899938357225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069472389687287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12297408601543032,0.1292020260951793,0.0,0.0,0.11272648213816275,0.0,0.0,0.11262541952372684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540325090601653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10051731249529668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379367273811784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19472948853695626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997289667401327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984045805466892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093323604471972,0.0,0.0,0.1892096608140648,0.0,0.10836467039031306,0.0,0.0,0.07819632697947644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726657672304085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29135072764975645,0.06942399830184216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17137767880059482,0.3585978800255617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579656651385383
mentalhealth,Hunter_nenny,2020/02/14,"I just took a lot more pills than I was supposed to I have been feeling so awful for a long time now and I usually take the pills to ease my depression but it was too much and i just took a lot more of them. Idk what to do, I'll probably throw them up.",0.3005263157894724,1.6159450175438614,2.5191578947368427,97.30610526315792,81.28070175438596,6.665263157894738,20.171929824561406,7.554174236665415,0.2614308771929834,194,5,51,3,5,66,40,57,0.128,0.815,0.057,-0.5829,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,4,1,5,2,0,0,0,8,9,4,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,5,1,8,0,7,4,5,8,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,4,39,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23502098902071625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797036550496972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414797787622168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4639655877464999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005895306148007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29419808125555513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20516293469035754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15911164731834312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6063332417974564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3005257822545338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HamBone1287,2020/02/15,"Help - My friend is showing suicidal tendencies and I don't know what to do. Any help is appreciated. I just found out tonight that my friend's wife found a noose in their basement yesterday that was tied to the rafters. He, thankfully, didnt hurt himself. 
He is a new dad and is having a hard time adjusting. I knew he was having some difficulty with it, but I wasnt aware it was this bad...
I am also a new dad. My wife and my friend's wife are really close, thats how I found out about this situation...
I am supposed to go ice fishing tomorrow with him and his wife asked if I can get him to open up. I of course want to do anything I can to help him, but he is generally a pretty closed book when it comes to this type of thing...so I have no idea what to do.
I am planning just trying to empathize with him and go from there...
Does anyone have any advice or dealt with a situation like this before?
Any help is appreciated.
Thanks.",2.7306250000000034,4.059627895833334,4.27491666666667,87.21175000000004,74.72916666666666,7.828333333333332,24.25833333333333,8.447377352677275,1.2853683333333341,724,22,163,13,15,242,105,192,0.043,0.7709999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.9792,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,1,7,8,0,0,7,0,25,0,0,1,0,32,38,12,1,2,6,6,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,12,15,0,0,7,2,0,3,4,2,0,0,9,1,23,6,21,29,1,17,0,1,0,0,25,7,0,3,8,105,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307668504677284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070153925745909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27300551285341285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09356969429256842,0.0,0.11012203272789148,0.0,0.12510315273184608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117336790447864,0.0,0.0,0.1138705241530116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152736358131633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171063317686398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44017846944305344,0.31016580290074736,0.0,0.06991515691188123,0.0,0.15210539264202086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987597235407013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3587855158759367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432565247633499,0.15106590826180935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354368842728612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06537744013491263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584873820135529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13614252365061955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572818774760754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008374124491792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463767951231946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464060023090361,0.0,0.0,0.08890371860525413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803121695277776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085464512713004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789301984874372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fezzverbal,2020/02/15,"Dealing with mental health alone. Why do people think they can deal with mental health alone? Would you try to deal with a broken arm alone? No!
Humans are social animals, we need each other so it makes sense we would need each other to overcome things. If your perception of the world is skewed and you believe the things that asshole on your head is telling you then how could you ever hope to pull yourself out of it alone? Yet people isolate themselves.
Thoughts?",3.776033591731266,6.604997197674423,2.81806201550388,91.8779715762274,77.02325581395348,4.752454780361758,22.34625322997416,5.82211442006289,0.2840842377260979,373,11,67,2,9,107,61,86,0.17,0.8,0.03,-0.8873,0,4,0,0,0,0,9.0,2,6,1,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,8,4,2,2,1,22,14,5,0,7,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,7,9,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,9,1,10,10,2,7,0,0,0,0,15,3,0,2,3,47,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5715117291500891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542603905722094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101444214941352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42667113957672825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247865862310801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415798040987648,0.2932756455633073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13701867557236835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208484614265727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780487993488672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045811305248687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912787868159684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062593579929744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057719555850804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18329998009616452,0.08839485361469149,0.0,0.1095194478317477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936611814708885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448132456755095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19599602004319894,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisismytaa10,2020/02/15,urges I have the urge to want to become a serial killer. To have the power to take other peoples lives.,1.9871428571428569,4.0607850952380975,3.676428571428573,87.40607142857145,79.0,6.104761904761905,15.261904761904766,7.1686216300943375,-0.07178095238095272,81,1,16,1,2,27,16,21,0.19,0.752,0.057999999999999996,-0.6124,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5995468926171651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4793558637091298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3763511939868224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4081636183825799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201932524184549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MentalHealth4dvice,2020/02/15,"Looking and touching raw food makes me pass out. Everyone I tell this to finds this is really weird buuut ever since 2017, when I touch raw food (or eat rare steaks, etc.) sometimes makes my blood pressure drop. Sometimes to the point where I pass out. 

​

Does anyone have a clue of what this might be??

Thanks in advance!",2.9253395784543343,5.769203360655742,2.510210772833726,92.58672131147543,80.96721311475409,5.4529274004683845,21.82903981264637,6.868970318607317,0.6079302107728335,259,8,49,3,7,76,50,61,0.111,0.843,0.046,-0.4669,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,2,0,4,4,1,2,1,9,8,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,3,0,1,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,3,5,1,6,6,1,11,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,2,2,27,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20770084001878875,0.23292972028580275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403720593111426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677530917011581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19615126337047367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21378996693952695,0.0,0.17339859099184324,0.0,0.18317224733776236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520524057145329,0.0,0.4635953429444701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16097504575651847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559150475239222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033575021044964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18121320200485397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280436355064515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15857161738377692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3791813952662047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754938529110736,0.1764864806060504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23292972028580275,0.0
mentalhealth,Gurbapa,2020/02/15,"My Story So first of all plz forgive my english or grammar 👍

So, whenever I were alone I feel like  nothing is  going good in my life , well it's not my grades are bad and in next few month I am graduating from college bbut I haven't learnt a thing I three years , and  in last few months I felling low have anxiety ,bad dream way too many thoughts of how I can pursue my future , and one more thing because of my shyness I haven't  made one friend at college ,I don't know what is happening to me and or will happen to me in future , I just passed my whole day stuck in the room watching endless tv shows worrying about my future and not doing anything to make it better because I never got the confidence  of doing it😭😭😭😭😭",4.552997076023393,4.34202590789474,5.5914035087719265,85.05593567251464,69.52631578947367,8.334502923976608,30.046783625730995,7.793537801064563,1.7730985380116957,566,20,123,6,9,188,97,152,0.17800000000000002,0.738,0.084,-0.9274,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,7,9,0,0,3,0,13,1,0,3,2,19,23,10,0,0,5,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,5,5,0,0,4,3,0,3,6,3,1,4,5,2,21,6,15,17,5,23,0,1,1,0,2,8,0,2,12,82,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821785666485216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13456243894760106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475008887508162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29373704010780205,0.21445309100919185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556858556664654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344045954061338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893994211782573,0.12566245388794045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14961980569280106,0.0,0.0,0.13589931830999494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09996759303252134,0.14753593900810094,0.1406826928164674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110942382046324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666962343816887,0.14338135948211247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242428368371058,0.08593548480291592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16644011618628862,0.11741411015495225,0.17833422327472775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28080219414934754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13566433955195129,0.0,0.1870708397826996,0.0,0.0,0.16878006707271828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23838775786190824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337192812492716,0.0,0.0,0.13964435029738867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396206311491562,0.0,0.0,0.15815454353094244,0.0,0.0,0.1963852223702669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786342189684606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327334499630695
mentalhealth,vulturegriffin,2020/02/15,"I'm scared to go to a psychiatrist I've been going to a new therapist for a few months now and it's going pretty good so far. I feel comfortable talking to her, she helped me realize I have OCD. When I had an ""episode"" (I guess?) last year, she gave me the number of a psychiatrist and told me that I should consider being evaluated and being medicated. 
I wanna do it, but I'm scared.
Im 19 and, while I'm an adult, my mom wants to know what's up with me and she doesnt want me to take medication. It makes me doubt myself, because I am a high functioning mentally Ill person and, yeah being inside my head sucks but I dont know if my situation is bad enough for meds. I feel like they could mess up my head even more. Make me a zombie or something, if that makes sense. 
I'm also scared of what my family will say. I would be going to a psychiatrist for more than one diagnosis. I feel like they wont believe me or they will think I'm crazy or exaggerating. 
I know the answer to all this is to just go and do it, but I guess I'm venting. I'm so insecure and I'm kind of scared",1.6742720437457272,3.0196170606060626,4.2208430166324895,86.45577580314425,77.52813852813853,7.806880838459786,21.681704260651628,8.532816995589336,1.070830303030302,835,22,194,17,19,295,122,231,0.182,0.747,0.071,-0.9823,0,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,3,0,7,14,1,6,11,1,20,5,2,3,1,40,51,21,0,8,9,1,3,2,0,5,3,1,0,2,9,9,0,0,9,0,0,5,3,9,0,1,4,4,34,5,20,37,5,16,0,0,0,0,15,4,1,8,9,124,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057100202305987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456425872339476,0.06903997389904347,0.0,0.0,0.1276010380820293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042591966473508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13273551055323246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170240071581522,0.0,0.07480470134670675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676793631208713,0.0,0.17179732649693366,0.16182061066475945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3218307547462514,0.09499398987775444,0.0,0.0,0.24952911059059285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324672247203281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591329364510413,0.11966147250585625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223362116365382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793898183806448,0.18672806013457216,0.09231898005918812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066259012402234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267983285947565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258021894808766,0.22818756335251186,0.11413568681794505,0.0,0.0,0.13264438020226652,0.09040007800136653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938361592687196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674538288623788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889101063957748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11522234781683585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006593547892969,0.4535571550859386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730479810441828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719021352646678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515462371712193,0.09103110359658216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149926424599126,0.0,0.07257004779096975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822122404315047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360297046807373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045400812231696,0.0,0.0,0.07293332770537855
mentalhealth,howtopartyright,2020/02/15,"Fear of change and how to get over it At the beginning of 2018 when I was 15 I was diagnosed with childhood onset schizophrenia. 

I had been working with mental health professionals since I was 11 and I've been experiencing symptoms as far as I can remember.

So far the only mental health professional I worked with that actually helped me had to move.

I've tried multiple different therapists since then and op but tbh it wasn't a very organized place.

I feel stuck in a cycle of having to force myself to trust someone I don't. Explain in detail essentially the most personal aspects of my existence (I am aware that is their job but after seeing more than a few that don't help it just feels like I'm telling strangers my life story)  and just hope that they'll help. 

Another part to this that is probably the most frustrating part is the med part. I first went on meds before I had the correct diagnosis.  I was young and I know that that doesn't really matter. But the np was super irresponsible with the way she medicated me and it sorta fucked me up more than it did help. I've been med free for about 2 years and It's one of the hardest things to overcome the fear that I'll lose myself again. That I'll have to lose  my creativity and the the things that make me happy and make me me in order to stay just flat lined. I understand meds help certain people and I am not saying they can't help me. It's just been a hassle trying to get over the what if's and the thought of another trial and error process. this entire life I live is a waiting game to wait some more. and it feels so mediocre like I can't complain I have a good life I had an amazing childhood my parents loved me. It was genetics. The very fact that I was born is the reason I deal with what I deal with and I can't help but feel like that was random chaos kicking me in the ass and now I just have to deal with it. pick up the pieces to a mess I never wanted. anyways I need to change to find a way to make my life worth it for me or in other words fulfilling. I am painfully self aware I am aware it is me that is preventing these changes. and I feel like I have no one to help me address these issues. I don't know if it's where I live and nobody knows how to deal with these sorta issues even the professionals or maybe it's just me again. I don't know the whole thing is super whack and I feel lost and so incredibly isolated. I apologize for the spelling mistakes.",2.4202426657008296,4.25854164541833,3.7858402752625855,88.24082850416515,76.76892430278883,7.033755885548715,22.96287576964868,7.924219607001951,1.0357872509960164,1934,58,413,31,44,635,219,502,0.163,0.713,0.124,-0.9523,3,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,3,9,19,25,2,2,30,0,45,13,1,7,4,83,76,36,0,6,15,1,6,4,0,1,10,1,1,2,38,27,0,3,16,1,2,2,12,11,0,3,22,9,59,15,51,53,12,35,0,3,1,3,26,15,2,11,18,286,97,6,0.0,0.0,0.06768345058812275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14545592316598854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05901859104806655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22011485717289256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860204111520295,0.0,0.07039695953381041,0.0,0.07246439886441633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045810337086270116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15609417512033505,0.21041708062887712,0.14864821171534018,0.0,0.0,0.06339200005573173,0.058995920858653926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412039847418605,0.07247343567680578,0.0,0.0,0.05817424064431807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383293263143542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744872504402665,0.0,0.0,0.37191390472565017,0.0,0.0,0.06888819213597368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478356627405548,0.06882716128927856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246947895397495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19595856405123568,0.1355393568894822,0.0,0.1224888555379662,0.0,0.0,0.1551878309606938,0.07571250340292368,0.0,0.06259834694080625,0.0,0.13889110839937674,0.0,0.06967948235247713,0.0,0.30816462615626744,0.06987093730662551,0.13979319996130712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371662942653788,0.0,0.051428114335948065,0.053493203005366335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399761770423004,0.05274992148874443,0.07380185400540508,0.0,0.07701390519584272,0.22532402380089586,0.0,0.04808413802961787,0.06056077292794927,0.07246439886441633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477970741258115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04443254206127325,0.07131162571008813,0.0,0.0,0.07856914872146066,0.0,0.0,0.0551563042161877,0.0,0.0,0.0552693850589032,0.0,0.0723555713034172,0.0,0.0,0.11474738935026682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058766849653888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392645161489032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720895694024972,0.0,0.0,0.06062199171137266,0.0,0.0,0.08053004040194021,0.1382352171479956,0.0,0.0,0.055062543360188856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417912467619892,0.0,0.0,0.07220417482045037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445530800801268,0.04090917417411023,0.11010638153645534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429560608539459,0.0,0.07743578454147716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100986971120939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04466430941982345
mentalhealth,shayneless,2020/02/15,"Just a reminder. You're alone, but that's alright. You're good company.",0.07976190476190226,1.7984579285714304,1.4014285714285712,93.32690476190477,112.57142857142858,4.723809523809524,26.095238095238088,6.42735559955562,1.4974095238095244,57,3,11,1,3,18,12,14,0.10099999999999999,0.47100000000000003,0.428,0.705,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7771237537408212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6293478143060287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yellowstone2019,2020/02/15,"Idk if I actually have a mental health issue or I’m just terrible at dealing with change I have always kind of struggled with my mental health, even when I was a child. I had an anxiety disorder as a child/teenager that I eventually got help for after letting it limit me and my life for almost all of my life up until about age 18. 

I’m 20 now and I’m in college. I’ve gotten over the social anxiety I had-I rarely get anxious anymore. But now I find that I’m struggling with what I assume is depression. And it’s worse to me than the anxiety disorder ever was. 

I have gone through a lot of changes in the last eight-ish months-moving to college, joining a sorority, making new friends, getting into my first relationship, having sex for the first time, going through my first breakup, having my friend group dynamic change. 

I feel like my brain is really bad at dealing with change, especially negative, and it’s sent me down a depressive spiral. Now if i’m constantly busy with classes/friends etc. I’m worried about people not liking me, I have lack of appetite, I just want to sleep all the time, I feel lethargic and lack of energy, my thoughts are depressing. 

If I stay occupied 100% of the time I don’t feel that way, but the second I have a day where I have nothing planned I spiral.",5.397220588235292,5.885201454901964,6.312683823529412,78.19020220588239,67.78431372549021,9.512254901960787,32.80024509803921,9.516144504307137,2.993906862745098,1021,43,195,20,16,339,141,255,0.151,0.7909999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9343,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,5,11,13,0,2,15,0,16,7,2,1,3,36,35,14,0,6,9,0,3,2,2,0,4,0,0,1,7,11,0,1,6,0,0,3,3,7,0,4,8,3,30,6,33,26,6,32,0,3,0,1,10,9,0,7,20,133,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0961123190989518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09862380208643147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195181411781763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22603441493389784,0.11126599755220797,0.09767590605988326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223528116321298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10994774028585352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41675868487185175,0.0,0.0,0.10643301799845356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06351809143431647,0.2030783358899943,0.2544886365191152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257568183903823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984271202991452,0.06505190999879039,0.08909010918224011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14939895514740054,0.07036148538394417,0.0,0.0,0.09001834399303554,0.2513273801128489,0.0,0.0,0.2282800694187544,0.0,0.10291422667491558,0.0,0.05597430352823037,0.0,0.07877168500311874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20938115283755887,0.0,0.0,0.06601596767327335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279827787369174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256248462673008,0.0,0.08028273455910029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071299806573238,0.1391332140620043,0.09623476497306886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08373292552109668,0.0,0.0,0.06574303572731137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19851010144719894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951225392323606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450409294910213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682807684558515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309540402953527,0.0,0.0,0.10574171629806844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856142205165523,0.1003984510884368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497754836261856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20592687868581575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819029159785518,0.17229144660261064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058092126925140174,0.07817701066588194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002167392202932,0.10037002337797653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoseQuartz1993,2020/02/15,"My mental health gets worse when i’m alone I think my depression and anxiety worsens when i’m not having intimate relations. Problem is people usually go I need to sort myself out but I tried sorting this issue. I had 5 years of no intimacy at all. 

I think that is a lie people tell me? My mental health usually pushes people away so that I end up in square one again.

What can I do to sort this? I don’t want to die alone.",0.7395454545454571,3.0200793181818213,3.262454545454545,87.34618181818182,85.36363636363637,6.701818181818182,20.163636363636364,7.908726449838941,1.0454509090909083,332,10,69,7,10,115,61,88,0.25,0.7340000000000001,0.016,-0.9566,0,2,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,1,13,15,5,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,2,0,1,1,1,13,0,9,14,1,14,0,1,1,0,1,5,0,3,7,45,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3531715088487954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043142360754714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018961369602155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685071369702246,0.0,0.1769512543469903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101168700113074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907879646516158,0.0,0.09689862621269116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3624653597441628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17795687083390738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34364618953899595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264229986266573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553467249745572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35460803849655576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314471083739687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490238184664488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21849800963486754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575776696596038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37556156828651693,0.0,0.10056484740324438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17375325399728295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097958966871159
mentalhealth,Redskit4,2020/02/15,Venting/Question I was diagnosed with sketsofrenia when I was six-teen and I ended droping out of Highschool because of the stress and fear I let it beat me down for a while and it still has a hold on me but as I learned how to slowly address the problems that came with it I learned its something I can stand agens't my doctor urged me to write a journal and as I got older I started to regain control of my life I have recently accepted that this is part of me and isn't going away (Is it fine if I post my journal on the page if I felt comfortable enough),1.3500574712643676,3.5427027413793084,2.93,91.27333333333334,81.93103448275863,5.59080459770115,26.90804597701149,6.816661863887847,1.2180770114942532,442,20,92,5,12,145,74,116,0.069,0.845,0.085,0.4118,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,3,6,0,2,6,0,9,3,0,2,0,21,14,13,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,8,9,0,2,4,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,5,1,19,3,17,8,3,16,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,7,73,27,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21292783845779406,0.0,0.0,0.13815251335442552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592061628815378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541865983404639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300262926411416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319670349108631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007283203518601,0.2341710142496013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550235453603852,0.0,0.0,0.21760186636309065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879995495931768,0.0,0.1812579851994813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317461548787633,0.16007659385608272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454199261878215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21705041584764365,0.0,0.0,0.21685582375114693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237713534526087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17447206970565352,0.0,0.0,0.16041100541415562,0.0,0.180988280013454,0.0,0.259605719901659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CookieCutterNinja,2020/02/15,"I am done I am done being me. 

I don't want to be me. All the things i want to be or do seem to have layer upon layers of prerequisites i need to achieve before i can reach anything. 

I hate the way i deal with stuff. When i try to flirt the slightest sign that i might have messed up shuts me down completely. I keep procratinating on everything. I try to educate myself on these and other things but shit doesn't seem to stick. 

I cannot deal with emotions well. I get frustrated, angry, jealous, to such extents that it ruins my entire day, sometimes even week. Replaying mistakes without being able to learn lessons from them. 

I'm stuck in place, lagging years behind my peers. I am afraid to take risks, always assuming the worst. 

I'm lazy, unable to get myself to do the things i want to. 

I'm done, when does it end...",2.8076306620209093,4.619212585365859,3.800522648083625,88.67914634146345,75.58536585365854,6.636933797909408,23.29965156794425,7.447530270364453,0.8982017421602793,640,19,132,8,14,206,99,164,0.27899999999999997,0.7,0.021,-0.9926,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,2,5,12,4,2,5,0,19,1,1,0,1,20,34,5,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,10,1,0,4,0,24,2,25,25,3,15,0,1,0,0,3,8,1,5,6,93,34,2,0.1449973792845272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206494350626018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932048857377298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338209020952487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15202699348924228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351131430461916,0.2989718624575772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12688818373198582,0.4451479830686901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631025355813911,0.1284246405438082,0.0,0.0,0.09576940151457727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031429501594452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515102922600655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14315489314331753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288803329352345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538193056750375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075137194843552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514914002333051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640003367598374,0.0,0.0,0.14883772616723792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14340611568578548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598730896172545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901998407546383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889894477215922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968874053124916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25656963316371423,0.11509217060359107,0.1163081515549556,0.0,0.13037005746200067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977229938673813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337355833341812
mentalhealth,misslena28,2020/02/15,"Medication for depression Hi. So im taking an antidepressant (escitalopram) combined with lamictal and its not helping me much. I think I have to change my medication. If someone here has taken medication before, what was the one that worked for you?",4.996046511627906,8.38044023255814,6.698883720930233,62.35251162790698,76.90697674418605,9.951627906976746,31.85581395348837,9.888512548439397,4.447803720930233,202,10,30,7,5,69,38,43,0.128,0.872,0.0,-0.6796,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,3,3,0,0,0,5,6,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,5,0,4,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,24,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091162999980896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599723448108937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116652792616908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16472195094154535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26545363116210924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7427058979632489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18065552013658984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16652747612133528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20822432294523005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18477443247230452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15746754327291218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890991104502585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xovilels4yer,2020/02/15,"Mental Health Support! So i run a discord server to support and help treat mental health and if you need help or anything at all Come join here and me and some others can try our best helping you!

[the discord server](https://discord.gg/YrvCs2e)",5.742441860465117,8.65829434883721,3.969941860465117,85.7470058139535,70.62790697674419,5.230232558139536,29.3546511627907,5.985473137389443,1.4279813953488376,199,8,31,1,4,56,34,43,0.102,0.512,0.387,0.9406,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,2,0,1,2,4,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,10,5,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,2,5,3,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,3,0,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827394406419847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22734735955956198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866137519801496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4605503931789062,0.0,0.0,0.4356220145315512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4366386565003782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063372722143548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4916746191458768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470824277589296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deltasoneca,2020/02/15,"I created a shareable personal journal I  wanted quieter and saner places on the internet, so I built this: [Quid Sentio](https://www.quidsentio.com) 

I would appreciate your thoughts about it",12.316071428571426,15.474972750000004,9.677142857142858,50.61785714285716,53.64285714285714,12.742857142857144,46.14285714285714,12.161744961471696,6.9879428571428575,159,9,18,5,2,47,25,28,0.0,0.8170000000000001,0.183,0.5719,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,14,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.478003739755077,0.5719585794835312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43460643538863136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3228944628692452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3888858705359588,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ILikeSarcasticJokes,2020/02/15,"Diagnosed with ASPD, ask me anything [AMA] Posting this to answer some questions and to promote discussion about the subject, as there seems to be confusion as to what this disorder is about. 

Note that most of the answers will be subjective, as I’ll speak from personal experience and I cannot talk for others.",13.596785714285714,9.391842250000003,12.187142857142856,57.55785714285716,55.07142857142857,16.2,51.214285714285715,13.816669648895859,6.900528571428572,250,13,40,7,2,80,45,56,0.092,0.863,0.045,-0.4069,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,10,7,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,5,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,13,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,5,0,32,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704109740036368,0.0,0.3071979743121471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33352352922699663,0.0,0.0,0.37660570158163015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214352471826793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28692208943972136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147093311921061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3681087998118814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991463957859086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641173781015237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carrotclown,2020/02/15,"Friendly Community and Mental-Health Discord Server 💕A growing, helpful and supportive community server for everyone to feel safe and have a great time.:) (clowns are welcomed) [Invite](https://discord.gg/m6XCpNb)",10.108999999999998,14.945346233333336,7.788333333333334,52.58250000000001,70.0,9.666666666666668,44.16666666666666,9.516144504307137,6.615666666666668,177,11,16,5,4,52,25,30,0.07,0.4920000000000001,0.43799999999999994,0.9217,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,8,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3560198806548204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883896133961924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28785739486213113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4107750621705589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.396039260079823,0.0,0.0,0.2497351326655491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37547693586591424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4228037913994779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21725666678801595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,walker310,2020/02/15,Therapy What would happen if you went to Therepy and not say anything at all?? How many visits would the therapist let this go on?,4.225200000000001,6.0571997200000025,4.3889999999999985,85.85950000000003,71.8,8.200000000000001,28.5,8.841846274778883,2.2222000000000004,103,4,20,2,2,32,24,25,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,7,6,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599448203730726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17952360662377884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793343219947485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230118019697235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202558146650008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25120286567811856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3612397765930472,0.3667645468567304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928267353783724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44878848563882856,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myLurv667,2020/02/15,"Potential undiagnosed adult ADHD? (23F) I’m a 23F, and I know that growing into adulthood in your early 20s is already hard enough. However, I’m noticing aspects about myself that are starting to destruct my life in a way I can no longer avoid. I think I may have ADHD. 

My room is in constant chaos. It has been since I was a kid. It’s hard for me to keep up with basic tasks like laundry and room upkeep. I’m late to work nearly every day because I misplace or can’t remember where I’ve placed certain things (car keys, wallet, phone charger, etc.) and spend a considerable amount of time searching right before I walk out of the door. The other day I locked my own car keys in the trunk. 

Within the past year I’ve had to replace the contents of my wallet twice, replace my debit card 3 times and my phone once. I’ve started to avoid going out drinking with friends because I’m afraid of losing anything important I bring with me. I also have a huge issue with making payments on time. 

It may just sound like I’m lazy and scatterbrained but I’m really starting to worry that I’m either losing my mind or something is extremely wrong with me. I’ve become so anxious and self conscious because I’m worried that people are starting to realize my absent mindedness and think I’m stupid. Any constructive advice is appreciated.",4.686309645709606,6.171819875486385,5.43390129019046,80.19606184722507,70.08949416342412,7.43387261929142,29.86872824083555,7.85451343220497,2.092942412451362,1056,42,188,13,19,343,153,257,0.149,0.789,0.062,-0.9698,1,2,2,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,0,3,5,12,2,3,10,0,16,2,0,1,1,35,36,12,0,0,5,0,2,2,1,2,1,1,3,3,9,15,1,3,7,1,2,6,2,8,0,1,3,3,23,4,29,31,5,38,0,2,0,0,7,17,0,4,16,107,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906865825792018,0.11817865865395848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345746326421176,0.09671362049752084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082241600728707,0.0,0.0,0.1366248744351638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952120181437912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22116700772938805,0.13356589182478235,0.10290884697836418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069039993975848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598927718241687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847264177903034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496069563756305,0.13487720479622056,0.0,0.0,0.10189500225967284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343595979162006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873152948232802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21667236867709366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262272582426104,0.0,0.1074947461015602,0.0,0.0,0.06646404971683728,0.0,0.13642269070671456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854216846079267,0.11816784075992068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705961031199756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072667480481471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211233070698953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376880676445127,0.0,0.12879441787030785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154484629855292,0.08384278775049803,0.0,0.12635387598534792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747561557542629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13699853485848354,0.10327990594553016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616411681585565,0.0,0.0,0.10004069329777936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310354344925496,0.0,0.0,0.34240054668948705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034545587462001,0.1549836460847777,0.0,0.0,0.21155876706438875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599450416944227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804389069055597,0.2456356648216826,0.0,0.0,0.13222609657060766,0.0,0.0778797409740858
mentalhealth,huminahumina8832828,2020/02/15,"talking to my family makes me wanna cry and i have no clue why for the past couple of months (no clue exactly how long) ive completley avoided my family (mainly my stepdad) simply because i cannot stand his voice. i cant stand talking to my mom when shes around him, but when shes not i enjoy her voice. i have no issues with either of them, i just keep isolating myself for no other reason than the fact that i hate hearing their voices.... even hearing their voices through a wall makes me wanna cry.
anyone have any clue what the issue might be? i thought it might be misophonia, as i experience that sometimes too, but this feeling is different. its not exactly rage, i just feel like crying. the only reason i can see it being is that i have issues with loud male voices due to past issues, but it just doesnt really make sense to me.
have a lovely day",4.204473684210527,5.229678526315791,5.4248099415204685,81.55019736842105,70.75438596491226,8.039181286549706,24.77631578947368,8.344100000000001,1.5375999999999994,672,18,129,10,12,224,101,171,0.154,0.767,0.079,-0.9094,1,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,3,0,9,6,2,1,6,0,19,1,0,6,3,31,31,8,0,2,9,1,2,1,0,2,0,8,0,1,10,4,0,2,5,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,1,11,29,3,16,25,2,12,0,0,1,1,15,2,0,2,9,97,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941543009585518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165634574755194,0.0,0.0,0.10396030129940904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118892339243997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921651745919516,0.3848370089317828,0.07531441161175685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220118202557329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713308468731674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114234723506537,0.22018242503986185,0.0,0.11809647874336415,0.08342873269894889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529756186840705,0.0,0.0,0.263242494031773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4875582145452283,0.0,0.10380077015840897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057053545980969414,0.0,0.0,0.10334795974182297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053998704872742,0.0,0.23385769037912746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24777345046624305,0.0,0.13677309082510614,0.09321388558055407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881759926320405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22296232711095385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481322443078313,0.2401416804564409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305974217862716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549989757623325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187729105162832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271147278620256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053771468311719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Whichclothes937,2020/02/15,Please stop saying that depression doesn’t have a root cause I have been diagnosed with clinical depression/anxiety and it was caused by my upbringing. I personally somebody who has been diagnosed with a wide range of mental disorders (including depression) and it was caused by the fact that she was molested by her stepdad and had a baby at fricken middle school. Her baby is now 6 years old and she still suffers. Life events sometimes trigger clinical depression and that’s a fact.,7.424573643410858,9.209629906976748,7.288372093023257,68.33782945736439,63.88372093023256,12.24496124031008,37.58914728682171,11.855464076750405,5.368393798449612,396,20,61,14,6,126,58,86,0.177,0.7959999999999999,0.026000000000000002,-0.9231,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,5,0,11,5,0,5,2,15,11,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,6,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,6,2,7,0,7,5,0,9,0,4,0,0,7,3,0,0,6,43,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370381161075677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5520643051674204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4628672584601146,0.3636373879193432,0.0,0.0,0.20530472605048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265286541562082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18052638359473988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18797250335410093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641415072279571,0.0,0.19663691232821234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245568647624746,0.0,0.1812946220155674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17716952394804195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430577883780922,0.14976524333603933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535734581580442
mentalhealth,needverbs,2020/02/15,"Is it depression, laziness, or something else? On my weekends I'm a useless lump. 

I don't want to leave the house. 
I sleep. Masturbate. Eat bad food. 
I remain generally bummed out and tired all day doing nothing. It's just always on the weekends. 

My boyfriend works weekends. 
I know I should be getting groceries or cooking or cleaning or reading or working on one of my 100 projects, but I'm not. I'm on my phone, masturbating, or sleeping. 

What the heck is this?",1.5417041198501875,4.257829752808991,2.682275280898878,89.04191479400751,88.5505617977528,4.764419475655432,29.888576779026213,6.42735559955562,1.6509093632958804,364,20,68,4,12,116,63,89,0.12,0.868,0.013000000000000001,-0.7812,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,4,0,6,7,2,0,1,16,12,8,0,2,9,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,4,2,3,0,1,5,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,9,0,7,10,1,9,0,2,0,0,1,5,1,6,4,42,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18818951151686847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888404492096862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14585935318433588,0.0,0.1947977711401416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314258566177553,0.18893395881944666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734826875988297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816320513811455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609669757865838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429576541178025,0.0,0.0,0.239478769268958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21701385478627971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15325697863712132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22622874454863784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4526617517860712,0.0,0.0,0.17411482214636206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25994631710078603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13339947512694764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293053261074901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iloveitalianmen,2020/02/15,"I feel stressed and depressed. I have bipolar type 2, and i see a doctor every month. But i have been at odds with family, and having a hard time finding work in my field (hairstylist in training, but only on level 1, about to go to level 2), 

And 6 months experience in retail, because i wasted my young adulthood by getting married to a cheating abusive prick that was financially stable  and now divorced since late 2017, and then living with abusive jerks, now living with controlling family again, due to my mom having joint issues. FML, But aint nobody tryna help me make money. 

Cant find work, been staying home more often due to bad weather, they all tell you, to go look for a job online, do that as well, but no luck. 

Sometimes i wish i had someone like my ex husband... so i wouldnt have to suffer

🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️🤦🏾‍♀️",1.1198126614987096,3.2890347151162835,3.366899224806204,87.94308785529718,82.66279069767442,5.217571059431528,22.34625322997416,6.42735559955562,0.585130749354005,649,22,130,6,18,222,113,172,0.22699999999999998,0.665,0.10800000000000001,-0.972,1,0,0,0,1,0,25.0,0,1,1,3,7,10,3,1,4,0,13,3,1,2,1,23,21,13,0,2,4,3,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,9,0,1,3,0,2,2,4,7,1,0,4,4,15,3,19,16,2,21,0,2,2,0,8,7,1,2,12,73,17,5,0.0,0.3511305202486538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372142608886752,0.09032719278128988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619286405464356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762444775605286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15166521818928985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484533213680288,0.0,0.0,0.1449453285816667,0.279375770918592,0.0,0.07492263468740833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27086179399988963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741625436765304,0.0,0.16842456325039498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13273729443286647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931977552266988,0.0,0.14863339690629315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465806595554302,0.14704259501470113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714986755554345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239169243043353,0.0,0.2616856316793796,0.0,0.1244311800851724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890915456896256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17354285966859026,0.2365465921239639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126951220598282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807771309600472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12257336773130754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554970904041274,0.0,0.14655062919093928,0.0,0.0,0.15793673721330026,0.0,0.0,0.16973600652869714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295130412067206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640307491331953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322872499090282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703959899507662,0.0,0.0,0.21574892844826207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Esotericornot,2020/02/15,"Dissociative personality disorder or imagination? I'm not really sure where to start with this, but I'm gonna go ahead and say that no, I've not been to any professionals. It's not an option for me at this time, unfortunately, but it doesn't hold back my curiosity.

For a couple of years now, I've found myself being able to switch between three different personalities or a just plain apathetic state, each of these all very different from each other. They come with their own separate interests, goals, and ways of approaching things. I honestly think that it's just my imagination creating different identities out of these personalities, but I can't stop and it makes me wonder if that's really it. Across these separate ""personalities"", I'd do things that the other ones would never dream of doing (violence, uncontrolled crying, raging, detachment, and self-harm are a few) Thoughts?

  
I can answer questions as needed, I'm quite curious about getting second opinions.",8.693604651162794,9.348556965116282,9.092418604651167,60.5095581395349,60.74418604651163,13.391627906976746,35.22325581395349,12.688352899677879,5.092991162790699,786,31,126,28,10,262,117,172,0.14400000000000002,0.773,0.084,-0.8701,3,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,2,3,6,5,1,1,5,0,9,0,0,1,3,39,23,11,0,3,11,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,18,10,0,2,8,1,0,3,7,2,0,3,3,1,10,3,20,17,5,17,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,7,8,90,28,2,0.14617665951873693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994051410839834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124008282232002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259182488093991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161741693432983,0.16056819655419682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4581704912431532,0.16753111596034198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16027516221114874,0.0,0.0,0.07637127137941062,0.0,0.08307556424693874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975740553091204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083881408354161,0.11274045132606295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905308757157907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5105432831806521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163751312761099,0.15547687063885324,0.0,0.0,0.1872890223099818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624554675080526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524941358229016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346459197449953,0.0,0.0,0.12221023271519657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377697716667028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942265545881024,0.09366410106479024,0.0,0.1160479395665623,0.0852367856869322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061105296118099,0.0,0.11602822836253016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585223517692484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383970490885976,0.0,0.0,0.09413297614002794
mentalhealth,BombinPotato,2020/02/15,"I feel so worthless My friend messages me saying ""guess who took her virginity"" after him and his girlfriend where out for valentine's day, i always struggled to get past valentine's day but after this i just dont know what to do whenever i think about im on the verge of a panic attack ive had 3 already one of which i passed out and woke up 8 hours later the only way i can deal with it is by smashing my hand against a concrete wall untill i cant move my fingers i just dont know what to do with myself anymore",9.789818181818184,4.9321968,9.724090909090913,74.32613636363641,62.81818181818181,11.727272727272727,40.22727272727273,7.1686216300943375,3.1392727272727265,408,14,87,2,4,136,79,110,0.11900000000000001,0.818,0.063,-0.7063,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,2,4,0,9,3,2,0,0,14,17,5,0,0,3,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,0,4,0,0,3,3,4,0,1,3,4,17,1,18,14,0,19,0,1,0,1,9,7,0,1,8,61,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21417393318070665,0.0,0.1614914850767991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19247685113053511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22079590186500495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503332238679878,0.2000896649014507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4549245100068584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813351660928556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994700573221495,0.0,0.1013996546639536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138028246826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19113133606503213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096414927056314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21332440456764354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20627808512281728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315147527564178,0.14760784479329372,0.0,0.22771300570290884,0.0,0.0,0.1852729011364972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543415224580368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20289628615415836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435968828115995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21563186064238332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405298451536265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lxc_elexie,2020/02/15,"The future of mental healt diagnosis soon? I hope they will soon find a way to diagnose mental health problems with a kind of chip or something more accurate than quizz to diagnose personality disorders and mental healt problems. I am often not sure about myself , make my answers to the psychiatrist not really accurate (thank you self doubt) . Something that will analyse personality traits, reactions without having to think about it.",10.858333333333334,11.628054833333335,10.277222222222221,53.44,56.22222222222222,13.866666666666667,41.611111111111114,13.023866798666859,6.2873777777777775,356,17,47,12,4,115,53,72,0.099,0.862,0.039,-0.5365,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,0,5,7,0,1,4,0,4,3,0,1,1,16,8,2,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,6,4,11,6,1,4,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,4,3,35,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3515460256232512,0.0,0.0,0.19847810726416626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15828244446550438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840811507191148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17200579625986034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18033925150223287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559830963238905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5235710197677405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024263998400044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314177788010695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109428849869326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18066343839182056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666432692673638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632191331256724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15943993155870806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096609362012387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13746140842314256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669383506408791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,disabilityopenhouse,2020/02/15,"[Vent] [Advice] I have an intense anxiety over break-ins, and it’s starting to affect my quality of life at home. So this is very weird for me to talk about, I’ve only talked about this with my SO and I don’t think he really gets it (can’t expect him to). 

Here’s a little background. When I was 19, I was in a bedroom at my then-boyfriend’s house. His family was sketchy to say the least, and his brothers were known around town for drugs, making enemies, being general wannabe gangster idiots. 

Anyway. We were watching TV, home alone, when we heard his brother’s name being spoken through the bedroom door. Alarmed/confused, my ex bolted out of bed and swung open the door. This shady motherfucker, a total stranger mind you, was standing outside the door. He came into the house and had been peeking in every room to find the brother. 

Verbal spat ensued, my ex said he’d call the cops, get the fuck out of the house, etc. Guy wouldn’t leave, said brother owes him money, he’s going to find the brother. 
Coincidentally, brother shows up on his bike outside, manages to break up guy/my ex, guy eventually leaves. 

Meanwhile, sheltered naive me was shaking, and every attempt to call 911 resulted in me dropping my phone. I was also discouraged from calling because brother could also go to jail, he had drugs on him. I was 19 and in love with a person who wasn’t an absolute piece of shit like his brothers, so I hope you might understand that it wasn’t something I was going to just break up with the kid over. He couldn’t help the way his family was. Would’ve handled that entire thing differently now. 

Fast forward to a couple of days later. Get a call that sketchy dude announced a hit on my boyfriend for getting in his face. Apparently, that night, he had just got out of jail. Thankfully that’s the reason why he didn’t have a weapon on him. He had come straight to the house. 

Now apparently guy was back with two friends in masks. Thankfully, myself/ex were not home. They kicked in every door, ransacked the house, tied his brother to a chair, gagged him, beat the shit out of him, stole a safe, the PS3, the father’s stash of cash, WWII items brought home from his late grandpa and other significant family things. Now, he was coming after my boyfriend. 

So, knowing some gang bangers were after him, I supported my boyfriend while he slept in his truck and stayed out of the home, trying to stay out of town, couch hopping with friends, living in poverty. Mom/Dad were useless tweakers and he had zero family to go to. This lasted for four months before he found an apartment. 

So anywho, that was the first time. It was a big deal, I didn’t have enough maturity or life experience or resources to handle it better. 

Second break-in was at the new apartment. Bad area as that’s what he could afford. I was a college student living in a dorm of a strict, small, private university -  couldn’t have him live with me or support him more than paying for gas and stuff while he was working multiple jobs trying to get by. 

Stepped outside for a smoke, came back inside, his laptop had been STOLEN OFF HIS BED, right where I slept. The laptop had been on my pillow. They cut through the window screen, hopped down on the bed, stole it, and left. They had clearly been watching through the window which was much higher, pitch black outside and no lights, so who knows how long they were there. It really fucked me up. 

Third time was a year ago. Living with my current boyfriend at our old apartment. It’s not a great town, lots of transients, gangs and crime on the rise. You do hear about break-ins. My boyfriend was out at a friend’s house, I was on the couch with our two dogs watching TV. It was maybe 10pm. I heard someone coming up the steps, and then aggressively jiggle the locked door handle. AGGRESSIVELY, PERSISTENTLY. My dogs went nuts and ran to the front door. I figured oh, he’s home early, and sounds pissed to jiggle the door so quick. Wonder what’s up. The dogs were excited too. Then it got very quiet. I wasn’t paying a lot of attention, I figured he was getting keys out of his pocket. Dogs were still intently staring at the door. Nothing happened. I felt my heart sink. I slowly walked to the door. My dogs were very alarmed and acting strange at this point. I was shaking, and began texting and asking him if he had come home. Nope, still 25min away at his friend’s house. What felt like an eternity past before I swung open the door with a kitchen knife. No one there. Still shaking, I went and searched around outside. Not a soul in sight. 

I told the manager the next day and our neighbor. Nothing ever came of it. 

I was never personally harmed, so I feel ridiculous for being so paranoid, but let me tell you it’s getting worse. The other night we heard some jingling. Sounded like keys. We looked everywhere. All doors were locked. I had a panic attack. It could’ve been a fork falling off a plate in the sink for all I know, but I went into a panic. 

I’m home alone today and am so stressed. I’m watching my dogs like a hawk to see what they’re listening to, am terrified to be without them, and am surely hearing made up noises. I can’t sleep at night lately without wondering who’s outside. I really don’t know what to do.",3.5078357963875177,5.5127459576354685,3.817536945812808,88.47234811165848,74.15270935960592,6.321839080459771,25.55829228243021,7.0983637204850245,1.068543513957307,4117,141,810,42,87,1278,429,1015,0.096,0.8590000000000001,0.046,-0.9915,7,2,4,0,0,0,161.0,7,4,5,6,38,43,12,7,69,0,80,17,9,7,7,120,148,50,0,8,13,14,3,4,5,2,4,12,33,6,39,58,1,2,19,4,5,27,21,24,0,8,77,26,93,19,126,58,14,152,1,2,10,3,109,73,5,12,51,502,132,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04555279468168324,0.04132243372373417,0.0,0.0,0.09656061412489357,0.0,0.07455788968371796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03566125253359847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299657245828912,0.043579838545025104,0.05303263809052595,0.04379743860238646,0.07168993483026677,0.038922565790573516,0.0284167925867767,0.0,0.07933387687299091,0.0,0.0,0.041228225792988335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19040134008737164,0.15994948457265176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062285649998262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165768721199833,0.05157992002746743,0.0,0.060127163372545187,0.04805923794211092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048703989667449384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811994564513057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816697850942779,0.05198936666993367,0.0,0.04216700650725467,0.11782843458942205,0.0,0.0,0.045599572087892816,0.17578235504754725,0.0,0.023570542872089918,0.0,0.08951769248050913,0.0,0.08521269379437021,0.039651701593463366,0.0,0.05111223874174292,0.14406218993351594,0.08619182036140521,0.17048522187290868,0.0,0.10597220467137786,0.0,0.07456644030639639,0.0513945065183315,0.0,0.1846294013104447,0.04122253682798832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507965279498947,0.05524040150873018,0.031245844954206806,0.0,0.37407866059391787,0.04630038819858709,0.0,0.3765217160153585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04625936880460307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247614061450892,0.03799841106546346,0.1051701701553809,0.09871961427042064,0.05064861941508373,0.04766820563790987,0.06585277755947941,0.09109724969677008,0.04672166205054735,0.1646517751609546,0.04125385518278271,0.039145853279972935,0.0,0.0,0.07926282384719319,0.042072925331359486,0.044109359650890335,0.031116664248884342,0.0,0.046832221638627713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04945240365270745,0.04706905622516114,0.054596310327712616,0.037208592664732434,0.0,0.034268258359279685,0.0,0.03595327425991364,0.04502220019275862,0.04957683965405059,0.13123839012434285,0.0,0.08945897000070979,0.0,0.0489158425545015,0.0,0.03158833215464467,0.035453707909086765,0.0,0.10938809387260874,0.0,0.0,0.04450042157014755,0.0,0.08140690615413268,0.0,0.0,0.044067360780910725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959056184954083,0.04792920021666869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039809965723643835,0.08868533039300322,0.03707105989613094,0.0,0.0,0.03714706257167244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570168427002418,0.0,0.0,0.04664984882345295,0.0,0.03949774072764698,0.035887415267587534,0.0,0.0,0.03299517438235845,0.0993732975647673,0.11168323229672968,0.0,0.0533986803255648,0.0,0.05336437690951052,0.0,0.1057989844769752,0.04393520096112622,0.0,0.0,0.07493664449039708,0.0407445987850558,0.08583583676879904,0.0,0.0,0.061939441465139924,0.029869767898580143,0.0,0.0,0.0543645425717274,0.0,0.04418669096121751,0.0445437607148908,0.0,0.06329865681631175,0.0,0.0910744747282781,0.048529090691577736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538969947926342,0.0,0.0370017563983759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296410064880765,0.04206385463058891,0.0,0.0,0.08987267415369397,0.10110652427676996,0.03393713654634647,0.0,0.04750587318570868,0.033114799042796336,0.0,0.0,0.030019293592112313
mentalhealth,karabas379,2020/02/15,"Am i desociating or having a psychosis? For a long time i have felt that nothing is real and im just sitting infront of a tv watching my life unfold and just riding the wave, but a week ago i decided to smoke weed again fourth time in my life and ever since ive felt that time is just really fast or really slow, i dont feel pain like i used to, i can barely taste food or water. When ever i see someone on the street i dont know if its me making that person up or if that person is actually present and when ever i say something i forget it 2 seconds afterwards sounds are really loud or barely present. i have to really think to do passive stuff like i used to for example opening a door i have to think about it instead of just doing it like a regular person. I dont know if what to do should i inform a doctor or is this something that will fade?",7.299333333333332,4.7049861555555585,8.459444444444447,74.48750000000003,65.22222222222223,11.222222222222225,33.611111111111114,9.516144504307137,2.8597777777777766,668,20,140,10,8,233,98,180,0.066,0.899,0.035,-0.6062,0,0,3,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,12,4,0,0,9,0,20,7,0,3,3,37,31,16,0,4,14,0,3,3,0,2,4,3,1,3,12,5,3,0,9,1,0,1,3,1,0,1,2,9,19,3,15,27,0,25,0,0,2,0,5,5,0,9,21,100,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.11911172552495253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819771065061404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493229505223136,0.0,0.0,0.4291558116006966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3312273618424874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06171656767852681,0.0,0.2343910683932853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759391596707894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318443873188402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134160585566284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724273991109914,0.1788952085262217,0.0,0.0,0.1080181461752902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147515844110001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711865540096847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987910783418352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31973095785864275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389295710597328,0.3127758238323043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706601113983702,0.0,0.0,0.09726501479852492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096825314187137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034199764509111,0.18793356650194792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13972805789967785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564206273956859,0.0,0.0,0.21352030302066646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108391275651798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790816078850184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NickF0819,2020/02/15,"Should I Cut Her Out? My now-ex girlfriend, broke up with me about 6 months ago. It was really heartbreaking. Going into college, having been together for over 3 years, it destroyed me. I still miss her today, but we're still friends on Snapchat and Instagram. But Everytime I see a post or story, it hurts again. We were going to try and be friends again because we still love each other's company. We have fun together. But yesterday, I was described by her to her friends as just ""her ex"" and it hurt a lot because I thought we were gonna be different from that? I don't know. Should I cut her out of my life? Just pretend like she doesn't exist? Or something. Any advice on that or advice on getting over her would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!",2.3734474885844747,4.799629815068496,3.4005205479452063,88.01868036529682,79.61643835616438,6.633059360730593,26.17168949771689,7.793537801064563,1.6117284018264844,587,24,116,10,15,188,94,146,0.114,0.659,0.22699999999999998,0.9782,2,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,4,0,0,0,8,16,3,0,2,0,15,2,0,0,0,26,25,10,0,3,8,1,0,1,4,4,1,0,0,0,7,12,0,0,2,1,0,2,2,8,0,0,6,1,23,8,18,12,2,22,0,5,1,1,18,9,0,4,11,83,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32733207605051506,0.14846682967278607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138966807157254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20419664209683988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17498792512284064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38819936329518057,0.0,0.08750487366448978,0.0,0.190373071515853,0.0,0.0,0.1846546477970728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3585958940728775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204629509394192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830079001115992,0.0818255281429696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239117964567274,0.15116326111787218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368626413564733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16040593473716847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072962511947856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334651934720179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893942320897694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40126521921628905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15419922556563714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296570958401066,0.0,0.0,0.15875778190129036,0.0,0.0,0.11371245656648912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189777267719724,0.0,0.0,0.10785592587393096
mentalhealth,05username,2020/02/15,"Best books to read about mental health, anxiety, depression, mental illness, etc. Any suggestions on books to read? Either about mental illness / those suffering / improvement / etc. ?",7.906153846153842,12.212635384615385,6.0065384615384625,63.57596153846157,79.76923076923076,10.292307692307693,33.42307692307692,9.516144504307137,5.538338461538461,144,7,15,5,4,42,18,26,0.35200000000000004,0.47,0.17800000000000002,-0.7236,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,4,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,10,1,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445298159418935,0.0,0.16258726212538507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22304040686547888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18305447277028816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4740612393540242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22591277786485106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6425502177881642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4251812874084921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HassouTobi,2020/02/15,"How to ask parents to put me in therapy while avoiding to talk that they're part of the reason why I have lots of issues...but I'm also very smart. I can't just talk to parents at this point. Never did in my entire life. A recent argument with my father got me in a really bad mood...I'll also start university in a few days.  


I'm figuring I might as well try goddamn therapy and swallow my pride...might as well stop swallowing all my feelings. 

  
It's really tough. How do I ask for therapy while not just saying ''you're part of the problem'' and eventually blowing up? A lot of stuff is bad, but I have so many feelings that I can't talk without exploding. If i just end up talking, I'll end with saying I hate my father, end saying I want everything to disappear, etc etc. That won't help anyone.  


Please do reply. How do I do it? What mental gymnastics do I apply? I'm planning on saying ''I want to learn how to better express myself and how to interpret what I want to do in life''...could work, could not. I am still not talking to my father after the recent argument.  


It's really tough being so quiet and upset when other people do not even understand why. I'm sure my father just thinks I had a fit and now I'm not talking to him. It makes me even more hateful.   


And also, how do I commit after this? The constant questions about it, IF i do go through it. It's gonna be so goddamn annoying...god i really wish it would all just disappear...",1.8731031031031016,3.7484411351351374,4.232852852852851,84.24137637637637,78.52702702702703,7.223023023023024,23.462962962962962,8.167268648758528,1.4664195695695694,1120,37,225,21,27,390,146,296,0.151,0.7609999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.9629,2,1,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,0,3,25,14,2,2,9,0,23,3,0,8,5,55,45,26,0,9,14,6,2,0,0,4,1,5,0,0,17,8,2,2,9,0,0,4,10,9,2,0,3,7,30,5,34,35,10,32,0,0,0,0,22,11,0,6,17,164,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009947785878192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585804201757114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664463387949315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399043978011911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409596444662568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905356379805147,0.0,0.13378187496100838,0.0,0.0,0.05403070437591146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22261072382753694,0.0,0.18687208533883276,0.11067084790693588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529541427495484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472264197869335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04761369522112905,0.0,0.06700594318072534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542938721180422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056155485042129284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835156548474556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424522948722088,0.0,0.0,0.05592331960777798,0.08493903971197281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442980861615701,0.17775315199105005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461574516154432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860539505002418,0.1814495908851803,0.0,0.058082003594412214,0.0,0.0,0.09196449042048364,0.0791984989621916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801654558208138,0.0,0.0842213158668182,0.09385196680327157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21468460689652955,0.08613905272182401,0.16544386255224042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664985827772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059299405223526086,0.0,0.0669062408125753,0.07004322903072001,0.0,0.0,0.0959072309843586,0.0,0.0,0.07896097942018669,0.0,0.0,0.4040316680462783,0.0,0.0,0.28742672255625024,0.0,0.0,0.05368237942993312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0568806313486603,0.0,0.0,0.08721718457071599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912667964460731,0.14824556904575473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065526747391675,0.0,0.15119553738964012,0.0,0.09634203676522612,0.08076023574543208,0.0,0.060992313265782735,0.0,0.0,0.059514396395623836,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Avyspa,2020/02/15,"How can I help my clinically depressed friend as an bystander? Hello yall
I wanted to post this for a while now. She was diagnosed with depression and suicidal thoughts a year ago, she also was in a psych ward. 
Without her dog she already might have killed herself. Shes currently seeing a therapist but isnt opening up to him at all. We’re really worried about her right now because she isn’t hone with us anymore (“I’m fine, don’t worry”). She’s not only suffering from depression but also from episodes in which she can’t read nor write (like she doesn’t understand the meaning of the word s). She also has anxiety and therefore panic attacks around people..
We want you all to help her and give us advice on how to help her....
Just in case it’s important, we’re in German 
This will also be posted to r/teenagers, r/mentalhealth and r/depression. 
- u/Avyspa u/kpopstanlol 
Sorry for formatting, written on mobile",3.8386553030303037,5.89852994886364,5.00986363636364,80.04271212121213,73.375,8.32969696969697,29.34696969696969,9.029198982220553,2.7150519696969697,725,31,130,16,15,239,118,176,0.162,0.728,0.109,-0.897,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,3,2,0,0,11,10,2,1,7,0,14,2,0,3,2,27,23,15,2,2,5,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,4,9,0,0,3,1,0,0,8,7,0,0,4,1,23,3,24,16,2,19,0,4,1,0,27,11,0,1,7,91,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983715310244117,0.1087082110180123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353303772442256,0.3922835164541644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381516566780584,0.0,0.1216206122166058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917083167085198,0.0,0.13951460968949436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475693967183049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4225001507420337,0.12447158046117295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474722040642196,0.0,0.0,0.1176423234513468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24659824705100125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13567706183358458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059913091696176465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358507700511413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009597565253578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326917157201002,0.0,0.1438853295895262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501941980583957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23490017588953604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266782894196605,0.0,0.07856289207516104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472931443096603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772393232543992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13727944177088086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414239423126526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238827173519342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735820753683053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276669875419806,0.2950287500818037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466617872515616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821541891712604,0.0,0.0,0.2490828640968833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897268888469795
mentalhealth,idkdjvdibdub,2020/02/15,"Question about mental health I know this question might sound stupid but I’ve been struggling lately because I’m in debt, it’s caused me to go into depression. How would talking to a counsellor or psychologist help? Like they’re not going to make my debt go away so what’s the point?",2.1949350649350627,5.022010000000002,2.7070129870129875,89.64909090909094,85.36363636363636,5.324675324675325,22.402597402597397,6.868970318607317,0.8241688311688304,230,8,43,3,7,71,47,55,0.271,0.625,0.10400000000000001,-0.9003,2,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,1,2,0,3,1,0,3,0,12,9,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,2,3,1,3,0,0,1,1,3,1,7,6,0,8,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,4,2,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20959347101605705,0.0,0.0,0.1359890985287289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291673083403384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19214073930754846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3803489927220513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237126400142351,0.0,0.0,0.14952758215465398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260037740285876,0.0,0.2516469194732146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898690296309996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14890938544542082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.224814817905728,0.2366554132481465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210885188707923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49980719304708293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23321439763588336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17930536495098598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15847149730351354,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lononori,2020/02/15,"I need to find help but Im slowly becoming unable to have energy to even eat. 3-4 years ago i got out of a really bad relationship and everything seemed to be really shit. since then ive moved on with life and i had a job for a bit but then i got worse and worse so i quit my job and now im just sat here not able to move to the kitchen to get food, Scared of my housemates judging me, not having the effort to eat. Im starting to get ill and im really struggling. i used to eat 3 meals a day now sometimes i dont eat 1 and at that point its just a pot noodle. I got the sheets to sign up to the doctors but i need to do them and hand them in... it just seems too much to walk to the doctors.... Maybe years of hiding my depression and emotional trauma are making it so i cant talk to people, People shut you down anyway...  I dont really know what to do. everything is a blur and im starting to get confused by people talking normal sentances.",0.3421844660194182,2.0773808398058264,2.9192330097087367,92.47855825242719,82.83495145631069,6.255922330097087,19.03786407766989,7.365786028017652,0.2992959223300975,727,18,171,11,20,253,113,206,0.207,0.7440000000000001,0.049,-0.9901,2,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,2,2,11,7,1,3,11,0,12,13,2,2,0,31,28,16,0,3,8,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,5,11,7,0,4,0,0,3,5,7,0,0,5,1,19,0,30,22,2,21,0,1,0,0,7,8,1,4,10,104,24,4,0.08933274752762325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918809065368387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458911275420838,0.0,0.09866100112673744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752822332140478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05761223184150468,0.0,0.07694216454498466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828717048942982,0.0,0.0,0.20939462957357485,0.0,0.0,0.3656388106625113,0.0,0.1004873171094784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900343722478756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057302653802988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164851284107058,0.0,0.10802151290681598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14001802053000095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143426766989015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05987785761426554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4824734845313695,0.0,0.17729793530418775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04909494178800314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309836146196975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596303026548415,0.0,0.08974675202886229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18989314610807612,0.0656698481904729,0.13247820072119765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752712543884314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18579623728127284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444832130937731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501637318087228,0.0,0.0,0.22891538224771674,0.0,0.0,0.09590993899718532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943766449895925,0.0,0.0,0.1626503564915861,0.0,0.0,0.09169878159102858,0.07389697189399115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.088352371537259,0.0,0.12646035698635982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338998393483684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360455719673912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715481153242093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18207540328156446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150547210372257
mentalhealth,dbe002,2020/02/15,"diagnosing question so lately i’ve been struggling because i don’t know what i’m struggling with.... 

my question is, what are the multi diagnosis tests and how do i go about taking one? i’m not completely sure on what it’s actually called but when i was younger i got tested for ADHD and some other things, and also IQ. it was kind of like a whole run down. i want to take one again because i think they got it wrong the first time. and with my current psychiatrist, i really don’t like her. i told her i think it’s possible i have OCD and she seemed careless with it. she made me fill something out and said “yeah looks like you have it” and didn’t ask me any questions about it and left it. it’s not even on my list of diagnosis’s. i wasn’t going in there to just be diagnosed with OCD in 5 minutes, i want a more extensive look because who knows that might not be what’s going on. i just really don’t trust her judgement at this point and i’ve been thinking i may have some other diagnosis’s but i’m just not sure and really don’t want to self diagnose myself. i want to know for sure and target my struggle areas and get help for my specific needs. i live in the midwest of america and there’s not really great mental health resources. especially for my area.

sorry this was so long, i appreciate any help or advice!",2.1174169741697426,4.0995745719557215,3.877452398523985,86.57040738007382,78.18819188191881,7.140428044280442,23.01712177121771,8.109356740369918,1.2309166346863472,1043,33,219,19,25,350,138,271,0.10099999999999999,0.7759999999999999,0.122,0.6972,1,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,1,1,14,14,0,3,5,1,21,4,0,2,3,53,50,21,0,5,11,0,0,3,0,2,4,1,0,1,20,18,0,0,10,0,0,5,11,5,0,3,12,3,33,9,26,34,4,25,0,0,2,0,18,13,0,9,10,145,53,2,0.0,0.0,0.09351019101151148,0.0,0.11516156769218792,0.09363789327731813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663024591544187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032691891587184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958230333039638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523986904326352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978467978065054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046941501750767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917773728482791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329070598523187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150766221958593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05006397246676311,0.0,0.16337659512530356,0.0,0.15327806840987113,0.10564606079677144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185620209565904,0.0,0.0,0.12845732586229694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978572588792456,0.15798673800453844,0.0,0.10809340280637912,0.0,0.10411282233228428,0.0,0.0,0.14044398271122968,0.0,0.08461415736498093,0.08480103396239318,0.16093569043541334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067078190005554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656783687079164,0.10165389254154908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710521220937908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986535275274558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09058444942073346,0.10802691933561066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220337071281807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24554868046315534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115036256977324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723437459993832,0.09996510571694894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376983090296288,0.0,0.10726688163830962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30052747567910354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27093834884095697,0.0,0.144095121187211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636610645965657,0.18420003590889397,0.0,0.0,0.0558756193881618,0.0,0.0,0.09156373261262256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260774034363747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698383342870599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476826577808003,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lesnless,2020/02/15,"the curse of future planning and having hope. i think I'm driving myself insane at some point with my overthought-planning,
I am still 19 and i live in such a 3rd world country or in other words, ""sh*thole country"", where all hopes and dreams are crushed with time, due to low materials/money, tradition and mindless/dump people.

I've always hated this place and the fact that i am only surrounded by things that are basically forced on me, like im living in this place just because my family chose to (by making bad choices of course), and being surrounded by toxic people and relatives i hate just because this is tradition, and being expected to continue living in here and staying in a local college because my family is so protective, needy and miserable. 
I hate living in and being surrounded by things I didn't have a choice with. it makes me feel chained and controlled.

I dream of just leaving this place without ever looking back, not caring about relatives or even my own belongings. I simply want to run away from this environment, set everything on fire and start a new life. 
at some point, it's not just a dream anymore, I am already planning it all, I have plans to get the hell out. or at least make my life better with my own choices. my plans start within 2-3 years.

the only problem is, my planning is getting out of hand, I can't stop, i keep planning everything. 
just imagine wanting to fix a million things in your life. its still too early for my plans, and i might be even giving myself false hope and im never gonna achieve anything, i am aware of how hard or impossible it is going to be, 
yet I've literally already planned what things to buy, how to decorate my future house, where to live, how to do it, what adventures im gonna have, where im gonna work, how im going to make friends, and even more than that. oh I've planned in details. and i am still f* doing it. 

my problem is i never settle in for what i already have, i am always seeking better things, always believing that i deserve better than this misery. 
don't get me wrong, i am not greedy or unthankful, I've just always had the lowest of things and the worst experiences because my parents should've never gotten married, it's so toxic in here and it has ruined me. i only want to save myself and live my life. 

now am i capable of achieving those plans you ask? I am. certainly. 
the only thing i need is a little bit of freedom and a small opportunity, that's only to make it faster.
and what might be the obstacles, you ask? definitely my family and relatives. 

i know no one has a solution for my planning curse, it just feels so good to let all my frustration out. i wish my brain could just shut up for a moment. wish i never existed.",5.1232870493992,5.870906557009349,6.075353805073428,78.73084112149536,68.47663551401868,8.805874499332447,30.42590120160213,8.922882184376627,2.483313484646195,2148,81,403,36,35,712,235,535,0.134,0.733,0.132,-0.7955,2,0,0,0,0,0,72.0,0,3,0,19,33,27,5,1,18,0,41,6,2,10,10,93,80,35,0,13,17,1,5,1,1,5,4,0,0,0,35,30,0,4,5,3,1,4,12,13,0,2,3,6,55,14,61,64,11,68,1,3,1,0,8,38,1,12,25,290,90,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20209234024564368,0.0,0.2031756256187559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06053973159479125,0.0,0.0,0.050234414488830564,0.0,0.11413671674077823,0.0,0.057353308440639725,0.04693944526913056,0.050969599874414066,0.1488486196573407,0.0,0.0,0.06877623684044068,0.0,0.16196667379334526,0.06664477342068979,0.0,0.0,0.06814584020626943,0.0,0.0,0.06223892663404601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846658699814549,0.048739058559840634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095793107793143,0.05521823666869101,0.0,0.0,0.1097257040747584,0.05971322538883815,0.17264193893261173,0.0,0.06173185732293645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716282205964868,0.0,0.09567968056060552,0.0585594378792292,0.06938598163045273,0.05120122253277331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05468387327507746,0.18080638935247365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818928592639361,0.0,0.07043714623612436,0.0,0.0,0.3296926260218954,0.0,0.0,0.05425914812713988,0.0,0.0,0.03354845561761943,0.0,0.0,0.0646373014846113,0.0,0.06242212759478401,0.17247011622437042,0.029823254662135312,0.0611826166085056,0.32342042185968856,0.0,0.051261997709975235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20373835768250248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295171156274059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04526371633547005,0.18832509789441268,0.058957149475650276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041365326717804816,0.2321354296006028,0.0,0.0,0.06778268275402725,0.0,0.0,0.08464112721655319,0.0,0.1913355002592377,0.0,0.11541355000129197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682266665393162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641520937258577,0.06506530481996063,0.1462506272961116,0.0510359275865072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28388672980048274,0.03911484474903151,0.0,0.0,0.03559553341300506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801686660564164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14039630325238733,0.05884471062242735,0.0,0.04444111623981268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06674256761646485,0.0,0.039310650565412816
mentalhealth,Frenggie,2020/02/15,"Narcissistic Crush? Feeling f*cking shitty... Heyho, I don't expect any answers here except if you want to say sth or have been in a similar situation. 

Since a few months I am totally in love with a girl from my class. She has a boyfriend which is why I wouldn't make a move but I want to be around her in case their relationship ends. We've met sometimes for studying. Whenever we've met for studying our meetups worked. When I asked her if she wanted to go to the cinema, she said yes (multiple times) but cancelled 4 times only 1 - 3 hours before. Last time we studied, we talked for almost 2 hours instead of studying and she said that she wants to repeat a meetup like that but without studying. Today I wanted to meet with her and asked her last week and a few days ago if it works for her. She said yes but now she had an appointment which took her so f\*ckin long that now I guess she doesn't want to meet anymore. As mentioned she has done this multiple times before and we talked about that. Things went fine for a couple of weeks but now it's like before.

When she is texting me it's mostly school related and when I text her there won't be an answer for about 30 m. - 4 hours or never. Sometimes she is online but doesn't read my messages or she reads it but doesn't respond. I understand that no one is on his/her phone 24/7 but it isn't too much to just write a short answer especially when it's for a meetup.

From talking to her and looking at her behaviour it seems like she may be some kind of a narcissist. She has a slight drift towards feeling superior concerning her intelligence and her hobbys. She always wears very expensive (at least expensive looking) stuff. And the most important point is... even though she told me that she likes me I can't really tell if that's the truth because she treats me the same way she treats some of my friends who she doesn't like. But she also treats her boyfriend this way... mainly her bf is just picking her up from school. Her messages to him are also pretty short. She doesn't tell me very much about him (mostly concerning school because he is at university and went through all of which we are currently going through). She is also lying about him to me... Last weekend she made a trip to another city and said she would go with one of her girl friends when I asked. But she went with her boyfriend which isn't a problem for me but I have a problem with other people lying to me about nonsense.

I made her a birthday present which as she said made her cry because it was so cute from me but after all of that I can't believe her anything and I am not sure if she even wants to just be friends.

The worst thing about this whole situation is that I kinda like girls who are a bit more interesting with the personality traits (I am diagnosed with NPD and BPD). She is in so many points just like me (hobbys, political opinion, interests, people we dislike and why we dislike them, etc.) but I don't know if I can deal with a partner who is also a narcissist (and even more than I am)...",4.086512151215125,5.3083750874587485,4.638459345934592,86.33786003600363,71.22772277227723,7.687308730873088,27.13906390639064,8.07648339933343,1.549483168316832,2397,81,494,33,44,763,255,606,0.061,0.795,0.14400000000000002,0.9938,1,0,0,0,0,0,69.0,7,1,2,2,34,25,0,0,27,2,47,3,1,5,6,101,85,51,0,18,29,0,2,7,5,4,1,6,0,5,32,29,0,0,8,4,2,10,17,3,0,2,19,10,95,22,66,58,21,59,0,0,2,1,103,15,0,20,39,355,127,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058055622485935314,0.0,0.06558181250141958,0.0,0.0,0.20949902059325212,0.054495450326644115,0.0,0.0,0.04453750856407829,0.06867515596309025,0.0,0.0,0.06495149063013901,0.0,0.0,0.05389518612042415,0.0583026850557628,0.18368143595919045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977183582956333,0.0,0.1671892429016821,0.07378822114074993,0.0,0.0,0.07150142992629492,0.0,0.08248618287547221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246679576013075,0.07194102187440482,0.04223758843978365,0.06752044164635901,0.0,0.06647405028387625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06702211186411965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05800738823054461,0.0,0.0730420445429608,0.12977259264435215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623049106542063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15179926542794975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111663600506971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07214796004040662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934923359973512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682009159469966,0.03599325836606323,0.16015669038013644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239761155697319,0.0,0.0,0.0579592736137771,0.10999530642874976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059110019662598524,0.18591327527625304,0.043717108356501284,0.06639965632993335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05227591442020808,0.06960872974782456,0.09628983054858938,0.0,0.05051226487582156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.088759548810266,0.04981040313011263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908092460357614,0.05718599058116181,0.0,0.0,0.1238241715651241,0.0,0.0,0.06662996013872143,0.0,0.12533597587362832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102151349071636,0.0,0.041956514241257216,0.0,0.0,0.07031500778849306,0.0,0.0,0.31149436258756796,0.05208268885787177,0.0,0.19884733892212808,0.0,0.0596223978614077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05417651401513799,0.14723382718514555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12954856937103293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497385417249187,0.0,0.0,0.06172640890165724,0.0,0.0,0.15792245824566956,0.11448759582848406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702132247899214,0.0,0.06434657278959295,0.0,0.1527580578271687,0.0,0.062079737764180215,0.06258140005636258,0.07276516990905461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818055750568597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807722308130427,0.2704064157587521,0.10397064292691087,0.10506912182983898,0.0,0.0,0.182138094326365,0.11819455170831852,0.07312063290047807,0.0,0.06313294707363179,0.0,0.0953594166674985,0.0,0.0,0.04652437184071225,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tigerpants888,2020/02/15,How did you deal with burnout? How long did it take to come back from it?,-0.9450000000000004,1.0802645000000022,-0.6699999999999982,114.115,91.5,3.2,14.25,3.1291,-1.996775,56,1,16,0,2,16,13,16,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,4,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,11,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39736144408023466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4451484742051892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5327634412079362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4573219799437335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3885440014256865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GuildSweetheart,2020/02/15,"My self worth is strongly tied to my competence to any given subject. The only problem is, I'm a 23 yo loser with no skills or passion. I can try to push myself to care about something for a week, maybe 3, but that's it. Everything I pickup I put down. Im painfully mediocre at everything, which, I get, is normal, I just wish I had the drive to see anything though, and finally be good at something so I could justify existing to myself. I've felt this way since highschool and I just want the feeling of worthlessness to stop. Any advice is appreciated.",2.8599999999999994,5.0041706422018395,4.466504587155963,82.45406880733947,76.5229357798165,7.295779816513763,28.33119266055045,8.238735603445708,2.168489174311927,436,19,82,8,10,146,79,109,0.11199999999999999,0.6970000000000001,0.191,0.7964,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,5,6,8,0,0,5,0,8,2,0,0,0,15,17,6,0,5,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,2,0,1,3,1,4,0,0,3,3,12,4,14,12,0,10,0,2,1,1,1,3,0,1,3,52,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18348271542857933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553745726135087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545153800153264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19143990227543944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499158342263051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33750386134848404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494010719908254,0.0,0.1802847598045263,0.20568842277535604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980999603028064,0.0,0.0,0.1574891722617734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028194492417184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18863613650610306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18397076672990464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280446775281286,0.19979621169031486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796666579686083,0.0,0.18875664332692546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962515381271332,0.0,0.1958808384414362,0.0,0.0,0.15532193603061675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891028069308657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15698074369349374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18447909475722155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274807563048234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107492234919719,0.14903987311959035,0.15061452103661865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159215785685437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MorbidlyObeseYoda,2020/02/15,"I hate Americans and want some advice on how to ease that hatred Disclaimer: I don't mean to stir up anything here; I genuinely feel this way.

I currently live in the United States. Every single day, I am filled with an undying hatred for Americans. I can't even see them as fellow human beings due to how much contempt I have for them. Rather, I see them as vermin that I take drastic measures to avoid. I've already ditched all my American friends and cut off contact with all my American family members based merely on their nationality. I don't like Americans and I don't want to talk to them.

However, I do not plan on seeing any therapist or psychiatrist as I do not see this as an issue on my end and I do not believe in psychiatry as a legitimate field of medicine. I don't even believe in the term ""mental health""; I see emotions as a social issue rather than a medical one.

Until I'm able to leave this country, does anyone have any advice on how to cope with this situation? Is there any way I can ease my emotions without involving therapy? This is not a fun way to live.",5.052857142857143,5.782983551401872,6.362082777036048,76.6751401869159,68.62616822429906,9.478771695594123,31.64085447263017,9.606745405546679,2.9541826435246987,856,35,162,18,14,290,117,214,0.126,0.81,0.064,-0.9334,2,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,5,1,9,7,3,1,8,0,15,2,0,3,2,26,27,15,0,4,8,0,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,7,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,10,4,0,1,0,6,26,3,34,26,6,22,0,0,5,0,12,11,0,2,7,114,33,0,0.1171534244505248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289619409805432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292817170855998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390050379653832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191639832860265,0.0,0.09640728620409562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639835824339628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555426690959867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252175121964986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635636681740022,0.10376316108452828,0.0,0.0,0.1547574638986219,0.0,0.09870681288533167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044182218418558,0.0,0.059236291468730114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051244511884098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156647522965145,0.0,0.12452861184980148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445554754222308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12404856087399785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05723524553848226,0.0,0.20689724028009476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12761442392986552,0.0,0.11801974996854772,0.1180630970666269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612124681691953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938619236213121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4667805569103629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13168535761845676,0.0,0.119423162748682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808479526322849,0.09416348488048597,0.0,0.0,0.1339751508813563,0.13602415538645996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382002501629654,0.2789728058573308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293172054060514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MsMorag,2020/02/15,Anyone else have a safe space? I was just wondering if anyone else has a safe space they go to when things get too much or just having a hard time? For me this is my kitchen (sitting on the floor also feels 'safe' for some reason). It's always been the kitchen wherever I've lived (maybe because I would get away from my abusive ex by being in the kitchen?). Basically I'm sat on the floor with my back resting on the fridge wanting to cry but no tears will come. I feel a pounding in my chest and I want to self harm. Fml.,1.6325000000000005,3.5090742870370377,2.6071851851851875,95.60633333333335,79.27777777777777,5.431111111111113,21.91111111111111,6.2581,0.12381555555555535,405,12,92,3,10,128,77,108,0.149,0.8029999999999999,0.049,-0.8988,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,0,9,0,9,4,1,1,0,19,20,6,0,4,5,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,3,3,3,3,4,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,3,3,10,3,14,14,3,16,0,0,0,0,3,10,0,4,3,59,13,0,0.0,0.22783309372328955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15377484235020195,0.16000130710019894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26890832510037743,0.3940491920493631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18066348833087786,0.1478597164349192,0.0,0.11721865569605182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656414535128527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21122235828925606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32126849284070724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19445596057721248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009279594899485,0.0,0.10928326389046908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17225474118104708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16979625412859528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931819028124234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14135582563209287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977069157551284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20060118806231625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12774942916123705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121262819920434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22683613145867496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20853111450970266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659783086314126,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eggroll04,2020/02/15,"Ketamine Therapy I’m exploring the idea of starting ketamine therapy. I’ve read research articles and it seems to have good results. Has anyone personal experience with ketamine treatment? I would love to hear about your experience. 

A little about me...I have been taking medications for anxiety and depression for 23 years. Currently I’m on several meds. It doesn’t seem to help much. I’m tired of increasing or adding more meds with minimal effect. I will continue talk therapy regardless of my treatment path.",4.736578140960166,8.15782114606742,5.862083758937692,67.44519918283964,79.1123595505618,10.876813074565888,36.180796731358534,10.230975488527342,5.612631460674157,418,25,60,17,11,138,64,89,0.09,0.8029999999999999,0.106,0.3612,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,0,7,3,0,2,0,13,16,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,5,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,1,4,2,13,13,3,8,0,1,0,1,6,2,0,3,4,33,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137078992057022,0.0,0.0,0.11093540126462192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13664948697819626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3103904485201812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13307245022557251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788159354791485,0.0,0.10634323290396976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910240358409932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901418561039685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319250780452036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35246031079451123,0.15982841759462066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11662982342948773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385315966623426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15869812935412164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28886746172056765,0.0,0.1792352109499917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122969636184484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11928896176122945,0.1275210359931612,0.0,0.0,0.5443081272771966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823508075363912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127040984917299,0.0,0.0,0.10216874386841768
mentalhealth,rainoutside2020,2020/02/15,"How can I help someone w/ body dysmorphia and depression Hi r/mentalhealth \- I hope I'm posting this in the right community, but may try r/relationship_advice and r/BodyImage as well.

So I (F, 30) have been with my boyfriend (M, 34) for 6 months. I've struggled with depression in the past but never eating disorders or massive body image issues (outside of the norm). But I'm posting here for some advice on how I can help my boyfriend through a difficult time.

He exercises quite obsessively and has very low self esteem despite being in great shape - he is generally depressed and struggled with his weight when he was younger. He doesn't really have any desire to work on himself emotionally in terms of therapy or anything like that, despite my gentle suggestions that it might help, and the only thing that makes him feel better is running. However, recently he sustained an injury that means he cant do that for the next couple of months and this has come as a massive blow to his self esteem and mental health.

He gets so down on himself that he makes suicidal suggestions which are obviously very concerning. It's really upsetting because I love and care about him, but I don't know what I can say or do to help and he is pulling away from me more and more the worse he feels. Does anyone have experience either from going through something like this themselves or with a loved one, and can give me some advice on helpful things to say, do or suggest to him that might alleviate some of this pain while he goes through a period of not being able to do the one thing that makes him feel a little better about himself?

​

Apologies if this is too long, I'm a first time poster!",8.486116771159875,7.617008605015677,8.054590517241383,72.82602370689659,61.695924764890286,11.360579937304074,37.17887931034483,10.550175099000144,3.8108384012539203,1351,55,246,27,16,429,173,319,0.155,0.7,0.145,-0.7095,1,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,5,10,20,0,4,14,0,28,9,2,5,2,49,47,29,1,3,12,0,4,2,0,3,3,2,0,2,20,16,2,0,5,1,0,4,5,10,1,3,2,6,21,10,37,40,7,34,0,4,0,2,37,14,0,13,16,161,41,1,0.09266435246734722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811010655483572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040178718361316,0.11259733086663565,0.06301493727383957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647930697986801,0.0,0.0762548665661025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706120946702639,0.0,0.0,0.056487329184670726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16390817893727866,0.0,0.20585841181660847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447748309581436,0.0,0.0,0.07982213458811227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253134350096728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394350129931611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620137599058532,0.0,0.08109119929822729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481876625505044,0.0,0.10423492424490234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906435176082304,0.0,0.0,0.1405616425792579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882025087111914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04841329958408317,0.08889209055396606,0.05266328695803403,0.0,0.0,0.102162775729152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849787349231673,0.0,0.0,0.3105548108907221,0.0,0.0,0.0920366104501414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671750902132402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05092590473387912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905422439166152,0.09287402497114708,0.0,0.08200503595648435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16726639191929646,0.0,0.18556252446733074,0.0,0.0,0.10093864532272796,0.0,0.0,0.09338387239878533,0.196604468683322,0.0,0.0,0.1479276041398923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146846119894401,0.0,0.09854959010318227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255835268083314,0.07047541566706109,0.09860140434788124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845860962011813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774936697416626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855994512962676,0.0,0.0,0.1187263139938729,0.0,0.09149486895072764,0.0,0.0,0.07913485069769455,0.0,0.14738082471361136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19333825793557133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851420513839369,0.07133754570002081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19374580157364285,0.0,0.10135976156627784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596976282480673,0.0,0.18468623484890284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806665822138592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06291301267748173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15291559076324596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284021738332872,0.08331638140949682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746075222334015,0.0,0.09443289170133376,0.0,0.0,0.11259733086663565,0.0
mentalhealth,-JustForThePost-,2020/02/15,"Waking up with extreme paranoia. Hey I was just gonna ask if anyone else experiences this or knows how to help. So every morning when I wake up, I automatically get this intense feeling of someone is in the house and I need to hide. No matter how many times I lock the doors, cover the windows, keep the lights on I always get this feeling. Most of the time I just lock myself in my moms room with a weapon to ride it out. I just don’t know what to do anymore. Just ask in the comments if you need any specification.",3.2547857142857133,4.568353752380951,4.58779761904762,85.54741071428572,73.38095238095238,6.392857142857142,25.505952380952376,6.6274283507984215,0.8310238095238094,404,13,85,3,8,134,72,105,0.08,0.8390000000000001,0.081,-0.2323,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,8,1,1,0,7,0,4,2,2,2,0,22,16,8,0,4,7,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,5,4,0,1,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,3,11,0,15,14,1,12,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,4,3,56,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769675897696918,0.0,0.0,0.14463034065576655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21092235553367986,0.14871146687638326,0.21791676902989335,0.0,0.0,0.3976559610303364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17766764496291654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17919287510648482,0.0,0.0,0.20804278155423667,0.0,0.0,0.21507575958832092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222340389132624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14255555915647594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454052637800574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18904060243986714,0.0,0.0,0.233767778514374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21562510396393636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490893607791421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31540046241325154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18020388064714973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480319471583123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,markrobertrow,2020/02/15,"When people speak to me, it’s as if my brain interprets it as Simlish. If I am engaging in a conversation with someone, and let’s say I’m playing on Xbox, or just even driving, or anything that causes me to not pay 100% attention to the other person, I can not understand ANYTHING they say. It’s as if their words are gibberish, and it’s extremely annoying. I don’t know what it could be, but I have a strong feeling that I have Adult ADHD (I have most symptoms), so maybe it’s that?

It’s so infuriating not being able to sustain a conversation if I am not looking directly at them. Any suggestions/help would be greatly appreciated :)",3.66,5.351617600000001,5.710600000000002,76.38430000000002,73.0,9.16,31.7,9.642632912329526,3.2324399999999995,500,24,95,13,10,174,81,125,0.063,0.7809999999999999,0.156,0.8661,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,3,1,5,5,1,0,4,0,14,2,1,1,0,25,19,15,0,6,12,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,2,12,3,0,0,5,2,1,1,5,1,0,0,0,5,13,4,11,13,1,5,0,0,1,0,10,3,0,7,1,73,25,1,0.217532094906468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614313051849166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479292840297816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580207583446428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428377600987681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234653834422798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368167703515236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14367789709167358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999076329283754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239829902590138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14580717783604186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954995040483965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224413052922087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18267217286336013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21854022763436134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150809364763043,0.18994063466828254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3459805059371893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843142380959207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260991381593516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264585824789997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452855892084688,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,secondaryaccount58,2020/02/15,"I Am Wrong... [Venting] I think I'm a psychopath or something...

One could say I've had a lot of things happen in my life. A lot of trauma, maybe. But I don't feel too much because of it. The occasional freak out because I remember something but mostly I'm just...numb.

Always have been. Ever since I was a kid. Despite those things happening. Every emotion I feel is surface layer. And I can push them away easily.

Last night, my friend told me I'm the reason they wanted to kill themselves a week ago. Because I'm an asshole who doesn't have a filter. I say things without realizing that they're shitty to say. I think it's a fact, but it's not. It's just shitty. And I hate that I can't see what everyone else sees as mean.

Probably because I'm a fucking psychopath.

And in addition, I now feel nothing.

When they told me she wanted to kill themselves, I felt nothing, really. I didn't feel scared, or guilty, or anything. I felt numb, empty. Maybe *slightly* desperate. I told them that I'm not worth dying over. But that was it.

I felt nothing.

I'm an abusive narcissist, just like my dad. Maybe a sociopath like my brother. It runs in the family. My cousin was diagnosed with conduct disorder, and my family is extremely narcissistic and manipulative on my dad's side. It's in my genes to be insane...

I'm not a good person. And it hurts a little bit. But I'm mostly just numb and empty inside...",0.5577192982456154,3.0354744767025115,2.795284851914733,88.09889219015281,90.97132616487455,5.5174872665534815,21.67902282588192,7.0608816371341465,0.9523132616487452,1085,40,214,18,38,367,142,279,0.213,0.7120000000000001,0.076,-0.9911,0,0,2,0,0,0,60.0,0,0,4,0,8,15,4,1,16,0,17,5,0,2,2,48,47,17,3,3,15,4,7,2,1,0,4,3,0,2,18,10,0,0,13,0,1,2,8,11,0,1,12,12,32,4,18,33,6,20,0,1,2,1,19,11,1,7,9,132,50,0,0.0,0.11312868416653685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463763102723032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944735789417579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857224988173123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897069972487472,0.0,0.0,0.23281591031319315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423988900450107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07623334574777642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691061605919893,0.09909360114314368,0.0,0.10942883291104366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976163880603193,0.10740262075043053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636750589629429,0.08044637155989243,0.09123563266281584,0.0,0.0,0.18002088414103512,0.0,0.1931110760858819,0.0,0.2750285284705782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376793534285722,0.08827010938036664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008444593277166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16886603946803558,0.0,0.0,0.09426714699458263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221376396772096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112698753993278,0.0,0.0,0.07782928558567713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744064406347146,0.09329382024033828,0.09569646405753444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234807668411586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28776874482291154,0.1040061680016941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018909453275099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960190578491152,0.0,0.2748481132167905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06470000338181461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336981955378417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294404136302654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06116720171936079,0.09816977360262964,0.0,0.0,0.10816070262504188,0.0,0.0,0.227789585936824,0.0955925567255482,0.0,0.15217106507842604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898238977052885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470109835372293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19029884448994294,0.12235999511408152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737068979884476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11263365059912844,0.0,0.07658863332266752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203971727930776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439285007841044,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bouncing-tomato,2020/02/15,"I just realised I am a chronic escapist Sorry for too much text but I'm kinda desperate lol....I've been suffering from anxiety since I was a kid and depression also installed into my life when I started puberty, but now, at 23yrs old, I just realised that escapism, the best coping mechanism I had up my sleeve to make myself feel calm and happy has ruined my social life and my current relationship. I noticed I have been running from everything in real life lately, I even avoid my boyfriend because you know... he's too real. We live together and he's always there to crack jokes, talk about how things were at work and so on. I know everyone uses escapism sometimes, even my bf is a little bit financially stressed so he overworks and watches tv too much when he's at home. Despite doing all that, he's still able to be nice and social when ppl are around. Me? I get angry when someone, let's say him, wants to drag me back to reality and make me spend time with him. I get angry because I keep wanting to be left alone and write, listen to music or drawing while daydreaming, stuck in my own fantasies. I've been having problems even when it comes to sex, I don't feel the need to do it since a long time ago, it depresses me. What can I do? I can't afford a therapist and I don't want to hurt the few people I have left that are close to me. At the same time I wish they would leave me alone but I know that's not okay, because excessive escapism can apparently ruin one's life, you turn into a chronic procrastinator too.",4.133169856459332,5.3453158815789505,5.208959330143543,82.32862440191387,71.10526315789474,7.895693779904307,28.620813397129183,8.296473431620573,1.9732289473684208,1204,45,235,18,22,397,175,304,0.188,0.7290000000000001,0.083,-0.9836,3,3,0,0,0,0,35.0,1,2,1,2,24,15,0,2,10,1,26,7,0,4,1,48,48,24,0,7,7,0,2,0,1,1,6,2,1,1,9,17,0,2,5,3,1,2,4,9,0,1,7,5,40,6,27,37,8,35,0,6,1,1,20,15,0,2,18,158,49,2,0.10374500123450464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196368397920553,0.0,0.0,0.21489706684723456,0.0,0.08296484000519679,0.0863241518658785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936464198184043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235504631625063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977350215258228,0.0,0.1897259694787991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887397823767757,0.0,0.11326267162833538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936713235332422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17871083508847874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20556778461894226,0.0,0.0,0.09913279457392493,0.09323931759327624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491317962534134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084049624560213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043848294458936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040646950885677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110611695266892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221332389209652,0.0,0.0,0.1710466185369267,0.0,0.1170288802067042,0.1098509767117079,0.2254384947901321,0.1060862927011643,0.2931126499044749,0.0,0.10397974602671824,0.09160873678660053,0.09181106142773676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385011878343379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252902592039205,0.07692560386724774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811437152272188,0.1088629270079748,0.0,0.07030029777823563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192372114213272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926995511296158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361690481522464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138330584299433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250218900112517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17163787418488766,0.0,0.0,0.21150992768500265,0.0879028028807418,0.0,0.10260645897373774,0.11613403515367568,0.07343124584637327,0.0,0.08285089199875674,0.0,0.11883954839635458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338630220149329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12045594257853146,0.06892356896052007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814836335451182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128447702160919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960237134992262,0.0,0.0,0.1835744690052225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930163144774596,0.0,0.0,0.07552759649572062,0.0,0.0,0.07369747228749189,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadmeason,2020/02/15,"Anyone else feeling so down lately? Apathy and probably dissociation I don't know what really happened but it's been a week or so and I feel like I'm on the verge of losing all of my senses. I'm 22, my health is majorly declining. I feel like I'm all alone and no one cares enough to help me. No one will recognize the hopeless look in your eyes or how depressed you are while you see that in others and always lift them up. Did I wear a mask, or was I really happy and ready to help others?

I'm taking some light SSRI and I've always felt depressed but it's never gotten so out of hand since I started them. Right now I can honestly say I don't feel like existing or looking forward to anything. I've lost interest in every single thing and don't see a reason to continue. I was filled with anger and sadness but now I feel like it's all just gray and I don't see a way out. I feel like I'm falling even deeper.

I still have a high-functioning depression and anxiety but it's started to show heavily on the outside as well. I can't force myself to go to work, uni or whatever. Me and my roommate struggle with money issues that weigh me down. I feel totally hopeless and like a disgusting human being. I don't have any strength and only feel like I'm falling apart and can't take anything any longer. I just feel like I'm waiting for the next bad news to crush me. I feel like I'm only pretending when I'm happy (but I'm not! deep inside I know I'm not). 

It's like a weird sensation in my chest and heart palpitations that never stop. I can't get myself together. I can't even rest without worrying. It's like life is a major labyrinth I can't figure out. It's like I'm slowly disappearing. 

How do I stop this?",1.5184911194394672,3.433520188365652,3.7830153169300966,86.85144003584814,79.80332409972299,7.017141926022488,22.80601270979306,8.027739517013583,1.2395503666286456,1352,44,285,25,34,466,173,361,0.174,0.597,0.22899999999999998,0.978,0,2,0,0,0,2,31.0,0,3,2,4,14,32,2,1,12,0,23,8,5,3,6,63,64,33,0,0,15,0,12,12,0,1,2,1,0,1,15,20,1,3,15,2,1,6,17,13,1,2,7,21,38,19,28,55,10,38,0,8,7,0,9,17,0,6,28,172,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932730876052092,0.0,0.0,0.1274631198837652,0.0,0.0,0.1041718117641055,0.0,0.05859347967403562,0.0,0.0,0.053555646983788466,0.07847863920079554,0.12605912105412456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395200407957052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809172722202691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19790846569337514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06398367169617443,0.0,0.0,0.07914110345935965,0.0,0.10117798479632403,0.0,0.06453295473973338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3872775145462412,0.4377447671286426,0.07354134701075811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04001671150790834,0.0,0.04352959991082065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06773098817735752,0.163069468822798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814148389295151,0.0,0.0907631424313503,0.10267742443973234,0.08092477095650008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994325298047418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418708311651042,0.0,0.08640030550677298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0540999419436375,0.4490339908929975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286377564176614,0.08568804008114106,0.0836103705563931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814657617976294,0.0,0.08145758604063855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380287659812562,0.11650494394626648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258027097045016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813494837794842,0.0787504201105182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541005297709895,0.0,0.06090987388826085,0.0,0.0,0.1831042519069748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335856901268468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084259212540282,0.0,0.06116731500427666,0.12807045208355164,0.0,0.0800716942869754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517689488331825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05088502431440788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06079600427352357,0.06143833105151359,0.0,0.06886635753789498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383297461739945,0.0,0.05576065839386462,0.07778396824608333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DonkBother,2020/02/15,"Living with Extreme Social Anxiety Hello, first time posting on here.

I'm a 29yr old Male, living in Scotland.

As far back as I can remember, I have had anxiety. About everything. A couple of years ago, I realized how not normal it was to be worried, and stressed literally all of the time - over every decision, every interaction. I had grown so used to it, I had just assumed I was normal. To this day, I don't leave the house unnecessarily, because something as simple as walking to the shop to buy food can be an incredibly stressful experience, with what seems like millions of possible situations flooding through my mind, until the task is done. I feel uncomfortable in my own house, when the very best of my friends come to visit. I can't relax when I'm around my family, because I'm constantly on edge (I am fortunate enough to have a really lovely family, doesn't matter.) I manage work by pretending I'm someone else, someone without anxiety, but I'm a mobile technician, so really I work alone 95% of the time anyway. 

There are currently 2 people in my life I can spend any amount of time physically around, that's my partner and step daughter. I was content in my shell, always doing the bare minimum to pass as socially acceptable, but I cannot force this on these two people who have become so important to me. I have never wanted to be outgoing, or extrovert in any way, but for the first time in my life, I want to be different, better - for myself and the girls. We have almost no money, and the NHS is pretty much a dead end for me when it comes to this stuff (I was misprescribed anti depressants a few years back and spent a lot of time chemically depressed and suicidal, which was by far not the case before the meds) besides the massive waiting lists and overworked staff. 

So I suppose what I'm asking is, how realistic is it to assume I can better myself rather than relying on therapy to solve this problem? Because my habits go well into my childhood, I'm not sure how I would be able to shake them. All I want is to be able to go outside, and not feel like somebody's punched me in the chest. It's truly exhausting, as I'm sure any of you with similar experience will attest to. Anyway, thanks for taking the time to read this, it's much appreciated.

Tldr; lifetime of extreme anxiety fixable by myself? Or is some form of external support required? 

Cheers, and have a good day.",6.5121489533011285,6.7105455369565234,7.5231400966183575,71.47023349436394,65.36956521739131,10.727858293075682,34.210950080515296,10.504223727775694,3.691244766505636,1897,79,338,45,27,642,239,460,0.11699999999999999,0.7440000000000001,0.139,0.9024,2,1,1,0,0,0,63.0,1,1,1,8,22,23,0,3,24,0,40,6,1,4,5,62,66,31,2,8,12,1,2,2,2,2,3,0,0,3,18,18,1,2,9,4,5,10,11,7,1,4,10,2,41,16,65,48,12,55,0,2,0,1,16,17,0,8,28,242,59,6,0.15807743089563162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006305232128894,0.0,0.07914585640219571,0.08186027237454845,0.0,0.0,0.06576654291206427,0.0,0.0,0.16124711057266686,0.0,0.2418576039164058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407224278586677,0.07389052950140465,0.0,0.0,0.12155178682125503,0.0,0.14454380197846448,0.08729205145561594,0.06725612536962604,0.0,0.0829462555612507,0.13980664160102255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616970958428104,0.0,0.08541277238100763,0.0,0.0,0.08745483530261389,0.0,0.10194686550811012,0.0,0.13615185959727896,0.0,0.0,0.08257863510991817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088404755898886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602670473020253,0.0,0.07000484195312114,0.0816681214380196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318705335325914,0.0,0.07103490099870426,0.1546300600967466,0.14902133331732947,0.0,0.07992869875618673,0.056465274108601714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13446058196593125,0.09557392845489646,0.0,0.061065115490971635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983904687381199,0.06629392455117288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18240013137141914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369058736965546,0.0,0.0,0.11165476434661142,0.0772286479361501,0.0,0.1395852675936314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719588942252121,0.07133552656913411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779419485959097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980657119725773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620510033060537,0.0,0.06095952993560388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15488231926118307,0.0,0.0,0.08293783611945174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959098677826966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891042758821915,0.07569724108007618,0.08041078854155062,0.0,0.0756293762718782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906010444671775,0.0,0.10126845003569684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895354569256269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195387805714291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884282775570583,0.0,0.16114003363781298,0.13393849421721624,0.06084786463399022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810771630030576,0.0,0.09048041934075488,0.08645552619728829,0.08969219763902736,0.14898610784958194,0.0,0.05942727752725323,0.0,0.0,0.07276822999802886,0.09038765940693147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226167741309372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720934021797772,0.0,0.0,0.06826407295102167,0.0,0.06521521784836172,0.1398572465808786,0.06273725337309892,0.0,0.0,0.07106529735571605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619050118855628,0.0,0.11508225238513525,0.08026765216780554,0.0,0.056146835722597085,0.0,0.0,0.10179668272463192
mentalhealth,Pacamilk,2020/02/15,"16(M) in mental and physical health crisis 
Thank you to whoever reads this. My story is so long and crazy I can't recall every event leading up to this. To boil it down I've been in a pretty bad health crisis for \~2 years now. I spent all of elementary school at a very small charter school with no more than 400 kids. I mention this because I have really bad social anxiety, and one of the things I suspect could be ruining my health. I played lots of sports, had lots of friends, and I had a gf(whatever that counts for). 

Fast forward to my freshman year of high school. I made the choice to pursue my love of football despite my fear of meeting new people and going to a public school with 2k kids. I knew some people before just jumping into it but to say the least I was pretty scared of most people but for the most part it wasn't that bad. Things begin to go downhill when football season starts. My graded start to slip in math pretty badly. It was a lot of pressure as I was pushed to far ahead into a math class I wasn't ready for. If you we ineligible to play, everyone on the team knew about it, and that combined with my extreme anxiety was a lot. I began having a lot of pain in my lower body. It got bad enough where I simply couldn't run. I started having to sit out of practices and face scrutiny from teammates about how ""I was faking"" and ""didn't wanna play."" This may not sound too bad to the normal person but the amount of fear inside of me at pretty much all times form this point on was pretty insane. I started thinking about every uncomfortable social interaction I would have to make the night before. This is when things really got bad.

Almost every aspect of my health took a hit. My digestion starting getting really bad, I had horrible fatigue, full body soreness, and horrible brain fog. I went to a multitude of doctors to which one could tell me there was something wrong with me. I was really suicidal but I've always been an extremely driven person so I took matters into my own hands(note that at this point my trust in modern medicine had been destroyed). At 15 years old I was tasked with sourcing the medical cause of my health decline by myself because my parents didn't take me seriously. Not only that but I had to balance my relationships with friends, my grades, and my parents desires at the same time. I had nobody to vent to. No 15 year old kid is going to understand and offer advice to such an intricate issue.

I became obsessed with natural health methods and did 100's of hours of research everyday after school. I completely changed my diet and started taking supplements. I eventually found a chiropractor for my pain issues and he referred me to a naturopathic doctor. I saw him for almost a year before leaving. He was a genuine guy who really cared but I din't feel like I was making enough progress. I decided to leave him about 5 months ago. I'm starting to be more open to modern medicine but I've had such bad experiences with every regular MD I've been to because I could tell they didn't really care. I want to see a psychologist to hopefully help me out and make my life a little less hellish. I've gotten myself into a spot where I don't think I could do any better for myself without some mental help. If anyone reading this could comment a similar experience for me to compare with it would really help feel like I'm not the only kid in the world who has to deal with such a severe issue. Thank you",5.123756521739132,6.1726697392592635,5.901122383252819,78.89031159420291,68.64444444444446,8.476972624798712,28.599838969404203,8.716276077567194,2.1995597423510467,2754,94,505,44,46,902,311,675,0.177,0.7140000000000001,0.109,-0.9946,3,0,2,0,0,0,59.0,1,3,1,6,19,38,2,5,33,0,50,22,4,7,2,94,97,30,1,15,14,2,2,2,2,3,15,2,0,7,26,33,3,0,11,7,1,12,14,23,0,2,42,6,73,15,99,43,24,80,1,2,2,1,40,33,0,15,38,349,99,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047254852787376886,0.042866426441589334,0.0,0.0968470518830202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04023770847335769,0.0,0.0,0.032885080772602784,0.0,0.07398743591757155,0.0,0.0,0.03381301999199239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633919974512793,0.08843571682666755,0.0,0.12344722312479232,0.0,0.0,0.04276869847714925,0.0,0.10742961578919637,0.0,0.053983492233209286,0.0,0.0,0.09860835532682144,0.049676960397513736,0.05115632474439507,0.0,0.050702415978384936,0.0,0.0,0.19304953767207544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049854948086009536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989928715465851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09993342865486077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16297471595609422,0.04620811675523148,0.0,0.09460675601741728,0.0,0.10883233075301543,0.04890248957599224,0.06909389296889326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05302202278152464,0.07472250193546054,0.0,0.025265045656908642,0.0,0.08244885357132646,0.0,0.07735257922549231,0.0,0.0,0.04788199736214409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30841359200106505,0.0,0.0,0.09723999244256812,0.05109285485857048,0.0,0.04803037977387578,0.047622863688761834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15141948404088515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240822483392316,0.0,0.0,0.03415666734564097,0.047250527150277534,0.048467394319232714,0.0,0.04279528549667739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055611021554395,0.043644959804565536,0.0457574845059158,0.09683797000317844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04871557156515086,0.09746692830454896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03859887370432639,0.0,0.03554867523196542,0.0,0.0,0.04670443289241469,0.0,0.04538068299807914,0.047380547419391364,0.0,0.0,0.1014871186295374,0.0,0.06553722976591432,0.07355683705984414,0.10291258823860668,0.0,0.1073916153039515,0.052366973689643166,0.0,0.10057599157647136,0.08444863576583524,0.0,0.0,0.09142783273701063,0.0,0.0,0.24598722421626584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674212125924828,0.0,0.21685549618089853,0.0,0.0,0.05191836690469445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03845620209045245,0.0484147683661044,0.244704258376703,0.03853504456914684,0.0,0.0,0.05463074638063056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858972982014473,0.0,0.03722833115376812,0.0,0.0,0.23959616162285355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052895775040032934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271835686130583,0.0,0.08453400196070697,0.08904305122736829,0.0,0.0,0.0963806680343299,0.061971674612011474,0.0,0.0,0.05639584736857103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10745497748032584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0503423566558448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03990039323364712,0.028522786139311036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04482832663074607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04661536154277253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870423493380656,0.05287185350774205,0.0,0.15570474977320267
mentalhealth,GamerGuyPanties,2020/02/15,help please so im very fucking worried about my s/o she serioulsy thinks i cheated and it makes 0 sense and like shes threatening suicide i seriously dont know what to do. like im talking to her and calming her so idfk,-0.5356231003039511,1.685642063829789,2.59452887537994,88.42000000000002,96.44680851063828,5.238905775075988,25.863221884498486,6.868970318607317,1.3920966565349544,175,9,37,3,7,62,34,47,0.273,0.505,0.221,-0.6087,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,6,7,5,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,7,3,3,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,1,0,2,19,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108276233569451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451851153817029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17776666203760627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5729510325456973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575411132452815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591393195340819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17703171558893468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291124196964445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900999412452375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21316813763365927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993776109913591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188284739940488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26933664280333663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AdrenalLeader,2020/02/15,"Beyond depression Have you ever tried expressing your feelings in words and

A) Realizing that words cant seem to fully express your emotions and a simpler ""I'm okay"" would just save you the hassle. 

B) Being told that it is ""gonna pass"" and that it is normal to feel such.

C) Being told that there are people who have it worst and that you are just making a mole hill out of nothing at all. 

Check, check, check 

It just seems that there is no-one out there to fully comprehend. 

I don't know, I wish I could just pen down my feelings, cry it out, go to bed and wake up feeling better but it just doesn't seem to work this way.",1.7130208333333314,3.6585750937500015,2.8590625000000003,93.56302083333335,79.3125,5.5166666666666675,19.260416666666664,6.42735559955562,-0.08020520833333357,484,11,106,4,12,155,81,128,0.069,0.877,0.054000000000000006,-0.4270000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,5,0,2,11,5,0,0,4,1,14,1,1,1,2,33,29,6,0,4,6,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,14,8,0,0,9,0,3,2,3,2,0,0,2,4,9,3,14,22,2,12,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,3,1,73,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16855023390515558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15216055614736734,0.0,0.2093403383806833,0.0,0.0,0.16414404579743105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21437393760914614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17238818001929931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854466631002016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830953516221577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473636166760902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272119024435346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867254004551845,0.1828641668240099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321223816253881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5204835552029643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3642097685798055,0.0,0.12938955299509866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512714790872352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191546186482962,0.0,0.0,0.13874262578455945,0.0,0.0,0.13538072563226305,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadgirlk8,2020/02/15,"Can you experience mania, or something similar, without being bipolar? Please excuse my ignorance on the matter. I'm just curious because I am not bipolar myself but I have been experiencing complete loss of need to sleep, can't stop talking, & making irrational decisions. I feel like everything in my body and brain is sped up.",6.133448275862068,8.817535103448275,7.244344827586207,63.7851379310345,68.65517241379311,10.157241379310344,37.46206896551725,10.355215969177356,5.001761379310344,268,15,37,8,5,90,53,58,0.14800000000000002,0.7020000000000001,0.15,-0.2141,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,7,5,3,1,0,13,11,3,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,2,7,1,6,9,0,5,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,3,26,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899623932241991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16313654982332387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972616296486547,0.0,0.2987485482003013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805908350344189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24051647681918334,0.2617803132117161,0.0,0.0,0.13531495610819916,0.19118529906134546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074391637042432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17863610863443893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843426246475232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937625809140889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678097946345672,0.0,0.0,0.20602427564451556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22373939812575694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21510002580637894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25797278035614674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Batstronaut,2020/02/15,"Might be going through a breakup soon, anxiety is killing me My girlfriend and I (long distance) are going through a weird time. She's angry at everything right now, but I have no idea if she's mad at me for something. She's blocked everybody as far as I know, and I haven't heard from her since the day before.

The anxiety is killing me. I haven't had the desire to eat at all since then. The most I've been able to eat is a sandwich with a couple slices of ham. 

​

Maybe I should post this in r/relationship_advice",4.5370889487870665,5.210020094339622,4.6760916442048535,88.5083962264151,69.75471698113208,7.943935309973044,30.23719676549865,7.957251820313856,1.7509423180592991,414,16,90,5,7,129,72,106,0.264,0.736,0.0,-0.9784,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,8,0,12,3,0,0,1,13,16,7,2,3,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,3,3,1,2,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,3,1,14,0,14,10,2,15,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,3,6,59,15,0,0.18010970121161493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19514878601374644,0.21885300096130555,0.0,0.0,0.27556685688990873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326009002476784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992879586493844,0.0,0.11615585717767266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685943775513654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187098590842328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20472098765650795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20332192963973367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3985293978366764,0.0,0.09898358151029246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593914178505128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809444032562976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19106793048545406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249530684083078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15381270073203107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979772120890898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386572473565627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502341518034213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21885300096130555,0.0
mentalhealth,Slangman16,2020/02/15,"Had a really happy and realistic dream, woke up deflated and sad. I've been single for about 2 years now, came out of an extremely toxic relationship that left me isolated. I'm in a much better place now and am the person I want to be.

Last night I had a dream I was in a relationship, a balanced caring and fun relationship. It felt really realistic but obviously when I woke up I realised it was all a dream.

I understand the importance of not relying on a relationship to make you happy. But I do miss being in a relationship and having that 1 person who is your best friend and will always be there for you.

Any tips on how to cope with the days that you feel lonely because of being single?",5.932608695652174,5.875572514492752,7.811413043478261,69.78277173913045,66.6086956521739,11.537681159420293,29.568840579710145,11.20814326018867,3.362388405797102,549,17,105,16,8,195,84,138,0.061,0.705,0.23399999999999999,0.9759,0,3,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,4,0,2,6,10,0,0,12,0,14,0,0,2,2,20,25,10,0,1,3,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,6,9,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,3,0,0,9,2,12,7,18,11,5,18,0,3,0,0,13,10,0,0,7,81,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468703002964188,0.0,0.0,0.09373029402486686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402093538791243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14464588347176846,0.12190095292889845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764276548299755,0.14052862150473575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889005494472857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969185750525002,0.0,0.13234006323922382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648844266363146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934488514772346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235124552586896,0.0,0.0,0.14975456383286428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200374139196374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132217113064132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12934572944710382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24069867777016685,0.14400480830079807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17659705461222802,0.0,0.0,0.7398984099990655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14348767831484882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129671779530262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875910677080882
mentalhealth,vethansul,2020/02/15,"Any artists/people using their hands a lot (regardless of specific disorder) here who have like this internal shakiness that makes it very hard to draw focused lines? Motor skill related but you’re not shaky on the outside? Better explanation in description. I’d REALLY like to know if anyone else has this, regardless of the mental disorder and if you ever figured out why it happened.

Quickly about me: chronic major depression with anxiousness, family history of schizophrenia, chronic pain and a few other things because God hates me lol. This symptom always worsens when I’m medicated somehow.

What I’m trying to describe is basically, you know when you’ve had an argument with someone that was very emotionally upsetting and after it’s over you still feel like shaky on the inside? Your heart is going slightly faster but you can’t shake it off. Have you tried writing or drawing or just grabbing a glass from the cupboards like that? That’s the closest I can explain that feeling. It’s like - with the glass example, you see it, and you go to grab it but even as it’s in your hand you feel clumsy and almost drop it. But you’re not shaky to other people. But you feel the slight agitation inside? When you draw/write with that shakiness it feels kind of choppy, now flowy or smooth. It’s like your brain needs like a millisecond longer to catch up with what your hands are doing. It’s like very very tiny barely noticeable jerky movements you unintentionally make. It’s driving me crazy.

It’s also a little like drinking just a bit too much coffee/tea. Like let’s say you draw and want to draw a line and then you want to set your pen where that line ends and draw another line from there on, but it feels very hard to focus to put the tip of your pen right where the previous line ended and often you are just a little off the mark and it’s incredibly frustrating. 

Anyone at all with at least a kinda close feeling to this? Ever figure anything out about this? Any meds/foods that seem to worsen this?

Really would love to hear experiences like this, if you’re uncomfortable you can send me a pm too.",4.76580357142857,6.745649837092731,5.154015507518796,80.31906837406021,70.67919799498749,8.29577067669173,27.005090852130326,8.930421266530582,2.195890288220552,1691,58,305,33,32,537,208,399,0.133,0.713,0.155,0.7888,0,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,0,21,1,2,23,25,2,7,21,1,15,12,5,3,3,72,41,28,0,9,17,0,15,11,0,1,5,2,0,0,37,19,1,0,13,1,0,8,3,11,0,0,2,18,27,14,43,37,7,43,0,1,1,1,29,20,0,17,24,194,64,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646742902399585,0.0,0.0,0.06905436508540977,0.07185043083625957,0.0,0.0,0.11744243453432116,0.09054589904513258,0.0,0.0975513470642526,0.0,0.12075638233267312,0.08847616539062488,0.07105900253217226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052638388188505136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636989104197922,0.09427224685399313,0.0,0.0,0.09639557823155262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743734529599844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979300255910446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459049527829275,0.0,0.0,0.07213465953207793,0.09713255139511123,0.15296160729267486,0.0,0.0,0.05703360945024483,0.15621771883635807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844672377947806,0.08140345020841759,0.0,0.30562941514537895,0.12337745280043587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441521831822582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981498180987434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635935297906637,0.0,0.15470595324194358,0.08525311986192945,0.0,0.0,0.09732315034578994,0.10232561220362732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992062942589127,0.094911817603167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882991106387353,0.0,0.4640507558673824,0.17309152511274487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734120023898678,0.07793458635611973,0.0,0.1152790939978454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698892005016416,0.08702086993355422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347746250923239,0.06402771021473433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831047625057636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09188288901086918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972895741711638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680597876277373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063652494116874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374274992975001,0.0,0.06866928543793151,0.0,0.0,0.06881007044476511,0.07861013989526623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731643939984376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895952241185105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975110440675227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736735337151312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725247524445982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745790007348709,0.0,0.35624052078809804,0.1018633789305834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791778407039923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134083012627471,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pidovey,2020/02/15,Currently on 24 hours of no sleep wish me luck I have to go to work in an hour. I couldn’t sleep last night. I’m hoping it won’t be too stressful. I have a hard time managing my emotions if I don’t get enough sleep so wish me luck,-0.22264150943396288,1.2663078679245316,1.9024905660377376,100.30241509433964,83.52830188679245,5.749433962264153,18.147169811320754,6.742157984588678,-0.3551328301886789,179,4,48,2,5,60,40,53,0.121,0.63,0.249,0.8074,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,2,0,6,3,3,0,0,7,12,2,0,5,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,1,7,3,5,9,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,6,26,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21799136502358932,0.0,0.20024027061150765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124899440454473,0.0,0.11013719148140763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17360072107703464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19248046170237293,0.3816947037919439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579673948837465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18186187277641092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5817997292833582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22198955652980426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113002424618588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44570543418826497,0.0,0.0,0.14108382165781885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MuchEntertainment6,2020/02/15,"Does anyone else's mental health seem to sharply decline when at home? Outside I'm the happiest, go-luckiest guy you'll ever meet. I'm always happy to be outside and around other people; I have an extra-extroverted energy and I want to share it with everyone. You'd probably think I'd never felt anger in my life, however...

At home, it's like there's a giant sense of unease. I become insanely-irritable and anything can set it off: A stubbed toe; a spilled drink; a loss on a game; my mother in general. My mother's easily the worst trigger for my irritability, as almost every single thing she does just about sends me into rage. I could write a comprehensive book on the ways my mother annoys me, but that's for another post (if there's a sub for that please point me to it??).

Outside, a stubbed toe would be laughed off; a spilled drink would be calmly mopped; a loss on a game would be spilled milk. My mother would still be a point of irritation, but at least a tolerable one.

What's going on guys? The irritability isn't who I am. I want to be nicer to my mother, but I just can't conjure up anything other than sharpness as my most polite response to her presence.",5.0418247126436775,5.678908383620692,6.3109655172413825,77.3639195402299,68.61206896551724,9.117701149425287,29.69080459770115,9.21078282632365,2.464905977011494,923,33,178,17,15,312,134,232,0.099,0.758,0.14300000000000002,0.7851,1,0,2,0,0,0,37.0,0,2,0,2,9,12,3,1,18,0,18,7,2,1,2,29,26,10,0,8,6,5,2,1,0,5,2,0,3,2,11,6,3,0,3,5,0,2,3,7,0,1,1,2,22,5,31,12,4,26,0,2,0,0,18,17,0,4,5,118,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353713826641458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248735248760323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175653985162653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945266826272682,0.1385162132949127,0.2224966217243652,0.12034609578471166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14930466657770175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793672013437848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23660808428262606,0.0,0.0,0.26486579826236184,0.0,0.0,0.11293233427993896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228540176468,0.1139018287563432,0.12917805000440444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12980180355158474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366105751304426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267715002639987,0.0,0.14391027644830667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436986587608588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712094306152043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548737304598068,0.06604609089875951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623783679601353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426541867212832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916069744704857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372242642945808,0.0,0.0,0.1483959687021814,0.2555929559228089,0.0,0.12947285751508786,0.0,0.14575566732786324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12307019474455458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796141393496043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981298545986881,0.08662309399333795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594749214163423,0.107306043799807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3841350705896846,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,danicaliforinia1932,2020/02/15,"Have you ever felt misdiagnosed? I think they are wrong with what they say is wrong with me they say it's just adhd, mild depression and moderate general anxiety. But my anxiety has been a lot worse to the point I don't want to leave my bed and I'm a crying mess about having to go to doctors or even work and I also know that there is no reason. But I have brought up that something isn't right and that I think something else is wrong that they aren't treating. Now I'm being told by my gi dr they think I have an eating disorder, but I'm scared my psychologist isn't gonna listen to me again.. I feel like I'm lost.",2.582727272727276,3.6953663636363667,4.129212121212124,88.9688181818182,74.75757575757575,7.704242424242422,23.04848484848485,8.238735603445708,1.0323430303030303,488,13,111,8,10,163,80,132,0.21899999999999997,0.748,0.033,-0.9523,0,0,2,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,5,2,8,9,0,1,4,0,15,3,0,1,1,22,32,9,0,1,5,0,2,1,0,1,2,3,1,0,6,6,1,0,7,0,0,2,5,7,0,0,5,5,19,2,10,25,1,8,0,2,0,0,10,3,0,2,4,71,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18287672716406916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168893542897152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23281666770807186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714973350764487,0.0,0.0,0.13106233478047605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439805632716127,0.15575070411958675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15570616090403716,0.12711708977604574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050572775649808,0.13764494016291626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694086519227038,0.1087090647249713,0.14610543225166012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648075224651389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362771875081948,0.0,0.0,0.16112425951816636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434174560957309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661096760857027,0.129368048022494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14384822970021666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15645435714638098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12995089772322235,0.0,0.2420206812784273,0.1523470153961319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23429318494586304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29250990921346803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14540333274968312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897528065454594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078033553126193,0.0,0.1550724989431953,0.0,0.499116448484671,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wilhelm1337,2020/02/15,"How do I get out of this circle? I have been in a circle for many years. 

I hook up with a girl on a party (it doesn't need to involve sex) and as soon she gives me some sort of confirmation I'm like hardcore in love and can't stop thinking of that person. 

Shit like that happens at parties and it usually end there. And since I caught feeling as soon as a got some sort of confirmation, the weeks after feels like shit, I'm like heart broken even if I just met that person for an evening. 

After I get heartbroken my depression and anxiety just spiral down to infinity, I cut myself, foggy mind, suicidal thoughts etc. I cant laugh, I cant smile, I cant feel anything than pain. 
And then It repeats it self, it's like I fall after just one compliment. Sometimes I hook up with someone just to forget the other person and yeah it starts all over again


I've been in a relationship with a girl for over 2 years so I'm not super lonely or never been with a girl
Many say I'm good looking
Can make almost anyone laugh

I lived like this for many years. SSRI doesn't work, spent lot of time on therapy, doesn't do any major difference. Only think that works is drugs but I feel like that is not a sustainable alternative 
I suffered from depression and PTSD for my whole life, doctors say I can't be ""fixed""

I can not stop going to parties, and I think stop interacting with women is a bad idea. How do I stop falling for everyone


Suicidal male, 21",1.5088781239678541,3.8055629044368615,3.1985181107563565,88.96516239128044,82.07167235494882,6.237983045249367,21.39700539469338,7.4822170145007005,0.8206680391940991,1133,35,235,18,31,375,157,293,0.149,0.7,0.15,-0.7705,0,2,1,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,0,3,13,22,3,0,12,1,21,9,3,3,2,52,47,19,2,2,10,0,4,7,0,0,4,2,0,9,14,15,0,4,9,0,1,4,12,9,0,1,8,7,24,13,40,38,7,37,0,4,1,2,18,12,2,8,28,148,38,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961057951766641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526676394687292,0.0,0.0734211442030211,0.0,0.0,0.06710843769576041,0.0,0.0789798195678955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801356966631735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16532745144463445,0.0,0.0,0.10027417419697167,0.0,0.0982351909720232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130133627464184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500597893504824,0.0,0.10703827028230756,0.1267820831469376,0.0,0.0,0.09170888980165756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941127811508844,0.13713011179003226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028667908094124,0.0920686323262962,0.05454519939645109,0.08049985967674092,0.0767605310733803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487099038404619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373166102856465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083448777853522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779047192479705,0.3282221376077943,0.0,0.08474829730101463,0.0,0.08059541195058463,0.0,0.0,0.081595104015773,0.08662181214432453,0.0,0.06406452187235596,0.29191287314180275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690809265186916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07116476195701853,0.07402237292481098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503561500185663,0.07299384110169342,0.10212490658266454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514068255272213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219045179752436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304197884467098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526474501605518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001235817132132,0.0,0.19703534402335854,0.07939208693281875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131989516985935,0.0,0.09492241673812273,0.0,0.06793209111341653,0.0,0.0,0.320959915092372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099636663322982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975657193368417,0.0,0.0,0.18449205064736912,0.0,0.07619398147438639,0.05596419974213545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570366902244556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698591360029806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107153436306282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974289847836094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18541560324804168
mentalhealth,M_ariaxo,2020/02/15,"I don't know what's wrong with me For years now I've hated myself, I hate my personality, the way I talk, the way I look, even the way I move, just anything that you can possibly hate about yourself. I always put it up to the usual teenage depressions that most people get but something about this doesn't feel normal. My self loathing has gotten to the point where I'm, or at least I feel like I am, losing all of my friends. I can't make new friends and if i happen to do so I'm always on edge and I can't act normal. It makes me feel like i'm being fake, like everything i do is a lie even though I'm trying to be as myself as i can be. I never talk in the group chat with most of my friends in because I'm terrified of getting left on read or offending someone or being boring or just saying the wrong thing. I feel like that's put a strain on our friendships and that none of them actually like me. I feel like a burden to everyone around me. I've talked to them about it before and they say that they love me but I don't *feel* like they do. 

I realise that they have no reason to lie to me, unless they're too nice to let me off gently, so the problem must be all in my head, but that doesn't change the fact that I'm still actually ruining our friendships. It's all my fault that this is happening because I can't talk to anyone without stressing and making things awkward. My silence has started to have the opposite effect of solving things and is just making a bigger gap between me and my friends where I feel like they just think I'm boring or stupid. 

And what if it is literally all in my head? What's wrong with me then? Trust issues? Social anxiety? Depression? It feels wrong to diagnose it because I can't help but feel as though I'm just being a baby, nothing is actually wrong with me, it's all just hormones and I'll grow out of it eventually.  But when i look at all of my peers i'd say that most of them don't experience this, at least to the same level as I do based off of how they act and talk. I'm not saying this because I want to be like ""boo hoo my life is so sad, pity me"", I'm saying it because I genuinely feel like this isn't normal to so much of an extent based on things I've heard from the people around me. 

Has anyone else experienced similar feelings? And does anyone know what might be the problem?",4.327195121951217,4.3130747276422765,5.460065040650406,85.1268048780488,70.01626016260164,8.348617886178863,27.172357723577232,8.021203637495839,1.4443767479674796,1834,53,404,22,30,611,193,492,0.152,0.675,0.17300000000000001,0.9209,0,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,2,1,9,2,26,43,5,3,19,0,39,5,2,7,9,80,81,37,0,9,21,0,11,10,4,2,2,6,0,2,33,18,0,0,16,2,0,6,15,26,0,0,2,20,62,17,58,68,15,41,0,6,2,1,34,23,0,11,19,273,95,1,0.0,0.0,0.17405822855262504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894248538757756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045482838579051575,0.0,0.0,0.12471675314274185,0.0609185748743836,0.04892631984154504,0.10585493889140203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18121578721064824,0.0,0.050591743970083335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289540465327242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241684283684704,0.06034547571808777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052029386868840274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0496669429370262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853880629458761,0.0,0.0,0.05681170834901245,0.0534342337521821,0.05815830429941924,0.0,0.0,0.3306840429196986,0.29732216547448514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18373884439189092,0.0,0.06212546652303345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051515499406498,0.0,0.0,0.17609822518825152,0.12203576782914333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039851368680315316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062055472571744576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534972036361593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459792680971257,0.06079666720453567,0.04199475675872676,0.2904666275427409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09985428998012733,0.06651482924119381,0.0,0.0,0.053660371844533705,0.0,0.1587464395219593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307225722268342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319115343244189,0.043706195172810935,0.0,0.04585528699563636,0.05742191645993636,0.0,0.0,0.17475954640170008,0.05704858358742462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243708828071959,0.05191372860978415,0.0,0.0,0.0562041014996492,0.06702647063441099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11378062652095453,0.0,0.11953719950355175,0.0,0.0,0.05947099302010581,0.0,0.0,0.061129543182027235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23640462875238455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062024431169668076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06060678696796134,0.050375946948589205,0.04577128955572242,0.0,0.0,0.042082486836561885,0.0,0.04748076287891677,0.0,0.06810539128691019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23893799732646276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15799678461553462,0.038096301593582,0.1168282819907667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040365976875526455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548117667667132,0.0,0.03506804261319167,0.14157760542676873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05731240549317423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32502301892810664,0.0,0.03828700866355765
mentalhealth,ComprehensiveBelt7,2020/02/15,"My insurance wants me to check into inpatient care, should I listen to them? Long story short, I just got out of a seven day involuntary hold in a mental hospital which was not a pleasant stay at all.  I feel like I got out of jail.  However what sent me there, suicidal ideation, hasn't went away.  Now it's getting worse.  My insurance has a warmline I've been using and I've had no less than three people on it tell me to check into a mental hospital.  I assume this is because they're afraid of liability issues.  I've told them about my bad experiences and they assure me there's better hospitals in my network.  They're even calling me asking if I'm going to check in.  Should I listen to them?  I can't live my life in and out of mental hospitals, but I dont know what else I'm supposed to do.",4.038906860011156,4.7479493435582825,5.753508087005018,80.20558839933075,70.90184049079755,8.872058003346348,27.08812046848857,9.095868883498916,2.0707595092024538,625,20,127,12,11,215,98,163,0.083,0.866,0.051,-0.5805,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,4,1,6,7,0,1,5,0,11,1,0,1,2,22,28,5,1,4,4,0,1,1,0,2,1,2,0,0,6,8,0,1,3,0,3,3,5,2,0,2,8,3,22,5,24,18,2,20,0,0,0,0,11,13,0,2,4,84,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607896786840422,0.0,0.16159252340474062,0.0,0.14360647161551351,0.10484497193669597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521133028319694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17562347243456208,0.0,0.17535771662078214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092087076993187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20157381431381846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14367758236099226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359935947972676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682415719958901,0.0,0.0,0.08696452628882947,0.12287140641691904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898589313660368,0.0,0.0977472456727099,0.0,0.27511607150841466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795153827502911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452252619731524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148332001391884,0.08402679998808603,0.0,0.1518724420900204,0.15220786356205673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5199836647780987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923787574434773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18332101630785705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881317723871165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15032894029634286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16434611076694222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14854621329043444,0.0,0.0,0.10144557492060756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594386798531269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17527495144900967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leviisdeadlol,2020/02/15,"I’m worried about my girlfriend. This doesn’t happen often but when it does it’s scary. I’ll start in order. One night she busted into tears panicking that there were people outside her window and that they were coming to hurt her, and I finally got her to calm down and take some breaths, then it was like she had a switch flipped. I was talking, saying it was gonna be okay and her voice went deep and she said “hello??” In a concerned voice, so obviously I said hi back and she asked who I was. That’s when my stomach sank. I told her I was her boyfriend and that her name was Kennie and that I loved her. She had no idea what was going on. She snapped out of it a few seconds later and started sobbing again. It was agonizing to hear, knowing she was in pain. Everything was fine for about a month other than the occasional hallucinations of people in her window until about 30 minutes ago when she quickly got up and said she had to leave the room. I was kinda sus but just thought maybe she had to pee or something until I heard her stop at the stairs, so I went to get her and she turned back to me, holding in sobs again. I took her back to our bed and rested her head on my lap for a few minutes and everything was okay. I thought maybe she had fallen asleep, so I kissed her forehead and she started talking in a deep voice again. I think there was something inside her. It was saying “she’s mine, she doesn’t love you.” And that they were gonna hurt her, throw her down the stairs, they were burning her from the inside out. Then she went back to normal. Now she’s crying again telling them to stop and I’m getting scared. Her older sister was diagnosed with bipolar disorder and auditory and visual schizophrenic delusions. Her parents sent her to the hospital and she hadn’t seen her in 3 years. She’s refusing to tell anyone because she doesn’t want to end up like her sister but I don’t know what to do anymore. I wish I could be more helpful. I’m trying my hardest.",2.6614285714285733,4.563238751879704,3.4359498746867203,90.73317293233083,76.26817042606515,5.963508771929827,23.68070175438596,6.742157984588678,0.6393005513784461,1558,49,325,14,35,493,186,399,0.155,0.753,0.09300000000000001,-0.9815,1,0,2,0,0,0,37.0,1,1,4,0,23,15,0,1,12,2,33,13,6,0,1,48,72,33,0,4,5,3,0,2,1,2,4,10,4,0,18,24,0,4,6,0,0,9,6,6,0,2,40,11,72,9,43,27,5,62,0,4,1,3,75,22,2,4,32,231,90,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855734689934461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907622106293366,0.06985399973159796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09339514960931647,0.0,0.0,0.307274758810195,0.0,0.06089950499281724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605697160851544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976384455410286,0.0,0.10973796779060352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139871521005303,0.0,0.0,0.11449667245265795,0.0,0.08742516185162627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848377094745294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17957146202696656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943806880376424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043896400235449,0.0,0.0567767701771481,0.0,0.15980196532979254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883432597013379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252856506886752,0.0,0.11259713460782647,0.0,0.06696239503394814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138949222400845,0.11277751835096192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980736509830387,0.0,0.0,0.10578209387621124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976144192874522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803314232917224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20073054387098507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974104986838013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375152585359954,0.0978830269375802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676963730474537,0.0,0.10630307368138292,0.0,0.11092966360879128,0.0,0.0,0.13851932954133922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850898480836063,0.15889261184838965,0.10001961425664292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538193178272169,0.0,0.0,0.2121340521701613,0.0,0.0,0.1670455653010431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511408448394834,0.1605953431004563,0.17463799896230978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401334963187721,0.0,0.15862250841215494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546091346416263,0.1109951132706744,0.06782709299531219,0.1086649971967512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058924955410422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277831254100377,0.0,0.0,0.1148826961321463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145561865080782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433379539267198
mentalhealth,Total90s,2020/02/15,"[Help] I struggle to make conversation and in public places I get worried others are listening to us Can anyone offer me some advice
How do I stop worrying that others are listening and judging our conversation?",9.715135135135137,9.933244972972972,10.122297297297301,55.441283783783796,58.729729729729726,12.80540540540541,40.12162162162162,12.161744961471696,5.6046864864864885,172,8,23,5,2,58,29,37,0.233,0.767,0.0,-0.7964,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,6,8,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,3,8,1,3,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,1,1,20,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29373580115867004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21018147197773426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704732931312534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20148101482331232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200648025360486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140554937311961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25130903697160994,0.0,0.3142448558988004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615761223734976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6105331505818601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QuestPsych,2020/02/15,Overcoming Agoraphobia  Today we have a fresh blog off the press which talks about how to overcome agoraphobia. Anxiety and Agoraphobia are the two most searched for phrases within mental health google searches so here are some tips and tricks of how to move towards a less distressing life. https://questpsychologyservices.co.uk/blog/f/overcoming-agoraphobia,15.822733333333332,18.526244340000005,10.734000000000002,47.790333333333365,45.6,12.266666666666667,40.66666666666667,11.855464076750405,5.3790666666666676,307,12,36,7,3,84,42,50,0.10800000000000001,0.848,0.044000000000000004,-0.3197,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,0,5,2,1,1,4,0,3,2,0,2,0,7,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,8,3,3,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,1,27,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921204248119368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40589733646804105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26971769061668405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38482318177859015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4058547610865964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069231009467712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3619568584267597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3730199075604931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ace_awkward02,2020/02/15,"Oh boy, this is super embarrassing to say out loud, but I really need help managing my weight loss when depression/ a lack of care is holding me back. I am as a teenager, 2 deaths in my very very close family made me quite depressed and uncaring about many things in my life, I chose food as a distraction and am now super overweight. (And I mean medically overweight around 90 lbs over what I should be) I really would like to be better, but my motivation is still nowhere to be found. I know I need to change and I know how, but I always end up not caring enough to keep going I say, who cares we're all gonna die some day anyways, or something to that extent. Family won't change with me, so constantly I am around people who snack/make unhealthy choices. My insecurities about my weight and how I look make me only feel worse, but depression feels like its holding me down from changing Is there any tips people can give besides, ""just eat less"" or ""you just have to stick to it!"" I tried going to a therapist, but she would never really give straight answers about it, so I was hoping for some help here. If anyone has an idea it would be very much appreciated! Thanks! 😖🖤💕 (ps: I am really not looking how to get thin quick or things like that, I just need to know some of your tips to stop being lazy and/or keeping the decision to get out of bad food/lazy habits due to depression)",4.441314832535884,5.417812610909091,5.158736842105263,83.85621052631579,70.16363636363636,8.698564593301437,25.74641148325359,8.99025400887824,1.7388909090909093,1088,31,225,20,19,352,164,275,0.188,0.6459999999999999,0.166,-0.7613,0,0,1,0,0,0,36.0,0,2,0,6,21,20,0,3,6,0,22,8,0,6,2,60,50,22,2,10,14,0,5,3,0,6,4,3,0,1,12,11,6,5,11,0,0,2,4,9,0,0,3,10,31,11,34,36,9,25,0,5,2,0,12,12,0,8,14,146,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07450671009872217,0.0,0.0,0.060892115198848476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06261034670435467,0.0,0.0,0.15942399695348386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885281893851539,0.07476442491810921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919325278790443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27388428997560377,0.0,0.2841729513476449,0.0,0.0,0.09676386181692538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057747642019456175,0.0,0.3084920290239408,0.0,0.0929311988303624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091624549473481,0.0,0.0,0.07930826578313674,0.09252155851381326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16882580090677926,0.0,0.09055097201563364,0.06396933185738014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21655080729745094,0.09817896272215934,0.0,0.0,0.09356474331219246,0.1717950585194246,0.10177837430078357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003718571129965,0.0,0.0,0.08893611782373631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108282348242452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591793546061754,0.0,0.0,0.14763099949708175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06324666608550036,0.13123813937100273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503866535496827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472747982620274,0.05977045604997479,0.09078225641178554,0.0,0.09753826449588326,0.0,0.09020486269245463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582419676446986,0.19918436066691292,0.06906086018143498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681012679713794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415528503967616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523969700620374,0.0,0.0,0.2294534185579793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241591826971756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893435491162722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715089260438121,0.07486171728969923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243889942808152,0.0,0.10396599096983937,0.11897639908445096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06079362419764271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22164634699210709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21807780228708595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125167410783376,0.1908257220272739,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kittybom,2020/02/15,"Describe what chronic depression feels like. I've struggled with chronic depression since I was 15.

It's easy for a lot of people to hide it when it's cyclical especially when you worry about feeling like a burden on the people in your life.

A few months ago, a friend committed suicide... for most people it seemed out of nowhere, but hearing people talk about how happy she was all the time made me realize that being open can build important support systems.

So, I tried to describe what depression feels like and how my brain works in an episode and I wanted to hear from other people as well.",8.004940476190477,7.708527232142861,7.3882142857142865,75.34011904761907,62.39285714285714,9.966666666666667,36.52380952380953,9.2995712137729,3.3482095238095244,478,20,83,7,6,149,79,112,0.132,0.657,0.212,0.8488,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,2,0,1,8,12,0,1,7,0,4,4,1,3,2,19,13,9,1,1,1,0,3,3,1,0,3,2,0,0,8,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,3,5,8,7,16,9,4,11,0,3,0,0,7,5,0,3,8,56,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12717154637178082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601524725929944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3706941523253855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21761804296713316,0.3074705991298405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083937837516393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527193349300001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3233870983371754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133236114679547,0.2102667438153664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196735489773484,0.0,0.13574842938282414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145110256362732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4972968917016184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060358686646886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867431213930525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499789750528158,0.0,0.15692554912504691,0.16280043608337988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531035446107565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365459538108158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740215356632674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461836269721239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899072276573886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444298036468966,0.14569393013313506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FrostburnSpirit,2020/02/15,"I can never explain this properly Hello! I'm 14 and live in Sweden.
I want to talk about my mental health I guess? I don't know..
Ask me questions, give me advice, anything..

I will try not to go into much detail here, but instead when I'm responding to comments.

Here's a list of my psychological problems:


•When I'm writing something, let's say this post, it slowly just becomes incoherent nonsense. I just loose focus completely. Same thing when speaking, but not as bad.

I have a really hard time doing even very small projects on my own, like writing this post. I've tried to write this many times but it never works.

Is it just me being very tired?


•I have been diagnosed with Asperger's/ASD at BUP (basically just psychologists for kids and teens). The oversensitivity and communication problems make me tired and confused. Also I can't see the whole picture of basically anything without extreme focus, I think it's because I can't filter out the details.

•At BUP I also got diagnosed with ""särbegåvning"" which means I'm smart. It measured 5 different things, one being how many things you can remember at once, that I was pretty bad at.
My mom told me she had read that this combined with Asperger's was difficult in school or something. That makes sense, knowing everything in school but not being able to show it is very annoying.

•I probably have some form of OCD. I like sorting things, spend like 5 minutes searching for spiders like I had arachnophobia whenever I use the toilet, and thoroughly clean the family computer when my younger brother has used it. But I barely care about my own hygiene for some reason...

•Depression. Yes I do know like all teenagers think they have depression and other stupid stuff.... I know that free online tests and strangers on discord are unreliable sources.. The psychologists didn't seem to think there was a big enough possibly I had it either...
I have pretty much all of the symptoms except for being suicidal.
It started 4 years ago when I got new classmates so I didn't know anyone, and a new terrible teacher, and I wasn't diagnosed with ASD yet so that was a big problem. I got so tired that when I got home I would go directly to bed, sometimes even without taking off shoes and stuff. My parents would bring food directly to my room, which they still do.
My younger brother was really annoying, he used a lot of body language, which was annoying because of ASD, picked his nose, lots of small stuff but extremely annoying for me. Turns out he also have ASD..
Being so tired and lazy could also be depression.

•Depersonalization
I have all the symptoms and it can be caused by depression.
My dad doesn't think I have it.

•PTSD
I don't know what to write here

•The psychologists thought I might have ADHD, not much to say about it but I think everyone are more productive when they've been outside. That doesn't mean I'm outside often.


Some much more farfetched things I probably don't have:

•Bipolar
•Psychosis
•Carbon monoxide poisoning
•being a psychopath
•Multiple personality disorder
•very bad whatever the thing connecting the two brain hemispheres is called


My parents and the doctor think to not be tired I should be outside more, and my parents also think I should use my phone less. When I don't use my phone there's no big difference, I've tried. I haven't been without my phone for more than a week though, but that's impossible.


I've tried to write stuff like this many times but every time I think it's silly nonsense, which it ends up being, so I'd delete it. It feels like I can't do anything about it. (No, you don't have to point out that this is a sign of depression. Wait it is right?)


I think I've written enough now",4.071682905631036,6.47303231988473,4.518870591464253,82.28501280819725,73.78386167146974,7.749288687617217,28.451031517313947,8.6104641854317,2.3198078587438817,2946,121,536,58,63,930,303,694,0.162,0.752,0.086,-0.9964,5,0,2,0,0,0,92.0,0,2,2,1,39,30,6,1,20,1,70,18,4,11,5,112,122,44,1,9,24,7,2,7,0,6,13,3,4,2,50,22,1,1,24,2,2,3,26,19,0,2,22,7,66,12,56,82,25,50,0,4,1,0,38,22,0,13,30,357,116,8,0.050223211534566915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060358540415406024,0.04907754104997199,0.04451984673021104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20081742059523305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035117237252801664,0.0,0.12398827139397732,0.0,0.04695192314961585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580285141924832,0.06123120719295196,0.0554675913025969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557866660023265,0.0,0.056065713885874106,0.051283514268472816,0.0,0.05120591136107675,0.05159307286632959,0.0,0.0,0.0526580817574074,0.0,0.0,0.04009914771043484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21628589250964855,0.15292650755186374,0.0,0.10494513317589207,0.0575601515536057,0.05140558514532007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04448285838067332,0.10378800605180392,0.0,0.06634391510438492,0.0,0.042315221827224365,0.04799043088972568,0.04513738411589445,0.0,0.047345974083427916,0.0,0.025394364790537437,0.035879472355366766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06073010674305531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04817868089257822,0.05708601701891676,0.0,0.16067236096752385,0.0,0.05532652972025999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04499013269088474,0.0,0.0,0.05338492531799432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05037797611953826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16560818165367794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05135663652078222,0.0,0.17175566998369862,0.0,0.04434801591691232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539595689529669,0.0,0.0,0.0670487673779047,0.15275536095389242,0.0,0.1094156016002454,0.0,0.0,0.050613184601423306,0.05327889072986846,0.0,0.05882081834954316,0.0,0.0,0.14767935693876072,0.0,0.07747047379647673,0.09701178132144936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05348608117600728,0.03403254792275324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673007986783016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043852971112408524,0.0,0.0,0.0474771684767499,0.056619124829025536,0.09619990734434014,0.10219012340224533,0.1082982330116482,0.1441704919371204,0.058708246660934715,0.0,0.05626149104063726,0.0,0.05023680264887436,0.0,0.06434855069574733,0.05163782612160393,0.0,0.0,0.056893108238693285,0.04289034823555448,0.0,0.07987902724878915,0.0,0.10165714272455564,0.04002139717193234,0.045721325529161104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732856384684664,0.04967204041188037,0.0,0.0355482476216176,0.0,0.04010832160747225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22997424563597854,0.0549360418617316,0.0,0.0,0.1044022938173134,0.0377616047181993,0.040367515010044215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001964205945892,0.2896290542425576,0.04934405033553908,0.039871619971278825,0.1171422341206975,0.28862096763053746,0.0,0.04799043088972568,0.0,0.13639305557512887,0.054628432191366594,0.049060779951213114,0.0,0.0,0.2168836472484076,0.0,0.16575763726492326,0.02962295140162924,0.0,0.04028603087561005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0560724221040598,0.0,0.14524015109951832,0.0,0.03656309615272717,0.0,0.0,0.07135425699964351,0.0,0.0,0.03234210159559004
mentalhealth,arcticarthropods,2020/02/15,"How do I stop talking about my problems to people? Diagnosis: Depression and anxiety

I am too honest for my own good. Everytime a friend asks me how I am doing, I tell them I am not coping and start giving them details of my mental health issues. I can virtually see the life drain from their faces as I elaborate on my troubles and insecurities. Eventually I ask them how they are doing, and they are so tired by then that they only muster up one ""good thanks"".

I feel like I am burdening my friends with my troubles. I really wish I could put on a fake smile and say ""good thanks"" but I just can't. Not only do I feel insincere but I also hate pretending that my life is perfect when it is nowhere near it. It is something that is beyond my control and happens automatically and goes on for too long before I realise what is happening. If I need help, I want to ask for help. But at this point I feel like I am just using all my friends as punching bags.

What is the right thing to do here? Should I tell my friends about my problems? Generally I do it only to vent, not look for solutions as I don't see any. Or should I keep my feelings hidden so as to not ruin their vibe? A lot of them also tell me to think positively and stop focusing on the negatives. 

Any and all comments are appreciated. TIA.",3.1550903119868643,4.752281969348658,4.854844006568146,82.39241379310346,74.13409961685824,8.036562671045429,26.604816639299397,8.704169506293173,1.9059690202517792,1018,37,209,20,21,345,136,261,0.121,0.652,0.22699999999999998,0.9869,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,9,2,16,24,1,1,6,0,26,5,1,5,3,47,49,27,0,9,11,0,4,2,4,2,4,1,0,0,11,10,0,4,5,1,0,1,7,11,0,1,0,8,47,13,29,46,4,17,0,2,3,0,25,10,0,3,8,157,58,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839919685787247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320030043105555,0.0,0.08054581897474496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952930873436713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959320875165899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180905988998202,0.08406472218778607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068528637195716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21294918651812672,0.1504370066705116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3253841704117906,0.0,0.0,0.10100283063010433,0.0,0.2649343262924122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18621348119495584,0.0,0.0,0.10395111805473824,0.0,0.11191731426014974,0.0,0.0,0.14114603344475038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989439129813026,0.0,0.0935857266888674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873750985870793,0.10287780240276348,0.0,0.0,0.09317747738759707,0.08841626661682662,0.0,0.0,0.08951296726058798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610657695975363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807048087020922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134657093283499,0.2402311531154145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299415556400797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995321648001534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20149476226426347,0.0,0.10584455514167936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745084803905932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991625545250742,0.0,0.08373006183062383,0.0,0.0,0.16780344854811158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810566384591014,0.0,0.0,0.07452411662595669,0.0,0.0,0.17605268550225048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462733321006666,0.27608175636969645,0.19387198370028205,0.0,0.0,0.06994935238109751,0.06746495838052702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101425016131853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093591556943076,0.0,0.0,0.062102197232292385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107718714563842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,melind64,2020/02/15,"Why are subs like these ALLOWED? Have you ever heard of the antipsychiatry movement? 

It's basically a scientology cult that denies the existence of mental illness and anything that has to do with psychology and psychiatry. Things like these could greatly affect us. Some people need help out there and they just oppose it. It's sick.

This subreddit: r/antipsychiatry describes it.",6.029084821428567,9.535488203125002,6.597589285714289,64.04562500000003,73.21875,8.657142857142857,31.017857142857146,9.23628265651192,3.6614982142857135,311,14,44,8,7,101,52,64,0.129,0.762,0.109,-0.3527,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,1,1,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,5,2,0,2,1,13,7,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,10,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,3,5,5,1,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,3,33,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669758305405859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590286115840548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29346285301858616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3576819831817329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21745662224470091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169973518698945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269461742635121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24055855701677398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249168768708857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21553492543525007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3902458121159904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.292744963689275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chadack42,2020/02/15,"Dont know where to post this I'm having trouble making friends who actually care about what I talk about and listen and are interested in the same things I am.... I feel like I'm just a weirdo who's into so many things but I cont seem to find common ground with others when it comes to hobbies. I love drones (fpv), retro games, microscopy, drums, mlp, imma furry, and gaming and game design. 3D animation/ modeling/texturing. And lastly, sound design... I can't find anyone IRL, not over a screen who is willing to be friends with me... I really feel as if no one cares about my opinion not even my partner at times.

Yes, before your comment I am seeing a psychologist.

I'm an ex foster kid since I was 3 and the recent family I was with didn't make me feel too included so that could also be it.... Honestly don't know why I'm posting this here... I guess I just don't know how to make friends and as a 25-year old. That's kinds embarrassing.

And it dosn't help that my partner is also a paranoid person. And when ever i make friends i feel like she scares them away... Or is always suspicious that I'm having relations with them but I'm not I'm just trying to make friends.... If you made it this far thanks for reading... Again i don't know why i put this here but i so want to ask 

Is is always hard to make a good friend?",2.0755555555555567,3.8908721296296283,3.5693518518518523,89.50958333333334,77.7037037037037,6.425925925925927,21.62037037037037,7.333567415737692,0.6182592592592586,1025,28,220,13,24,338,150,270,0.08199999999999999,0.7240000000000001,0.19399999999999998,0.9879,0,1,0,0,0,0,50.0,0,2,2,0,21,19,0,2,9,1,22,1,0,8,1,52,55,25,0,4,12,1,5,2,8,1,0,2,0,4,19,15,0,0,11,5,0,2,10,3,0,1,4,9,27,16,23,47,1,21,0,0,2,1,28,8,0,6,11,139,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.09789588148417044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16044851135674473,0.16694519823272347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014466702481137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378377324490653,0.0,0.09425204837209802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536321574033529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045617413618252,0.0,0.0,0.08641506058116842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009574739262204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757193029078575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625908240757411,0.09074335997383608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457086738172844,0.0,0.20289514801130668,0.14333437583802744,0.0,0.0,0.1833776401934641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4650325542141726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414196554788457,0.0,0.0,0.11051156948732777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986520933540744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724103016130506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446574314166064,0.22052856218076486,0.08177254634269368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802059959411896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09054089736816004,0.09492330218716157,0.4017782003997433,0.10170669039471784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526684906083963,0.0,0.06797806230776339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759379431202717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19215379672124105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084728208076024,0.0,0.0,0.10034513161810074,0.0,0.06426626943328641,0.0,0.09905190689326283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043580274486023,0.0,0.07994044515187351,0.09132572508733296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298407314374517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063179567956252,0.0,0.09235932165621592,0.0,0.0,0.13329362217074953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05849622329190542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810932619030792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059170146199176786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18104275445656492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460149273628556
mentalhealth,RCTNinja,2020/02/15,"Just need a place to vent Never been much to vent or share my thoughts but I’m just in a really bad place and need some advice. warning- bit of a rant

So i’m 17, Australian and Year 12 (final year of high school) and i’m really struggling. i’ve got a lot of leadership stuff and obviously academic pressure but it’s mainly my rowing that’s causing me pain. 
For most of the season i’ve been in the top crew, which was doing really well. Late november last year, my knee was in bad shape. Doctors didn’t know if i’d row again, mri’s, ultrasound, surgery, a lot. had 2 months to try recover and then get fit to get back there. 

Came back able to row pain free, wasn’t allowed to test bc my fitness would be lower than those the hadn’t been injured and got put in the second eight. did an 2k erg trial last week smashed my erg score and testing wise i got back into first eight scores. and yet i wasn’t put into it. they kept me in the second eight and no idea why. told that my chance would come and to keep waiting

i’ve done everything they’ve asked, and the guy who is now in my seat is also injured. he still can’t row every session because of pain in his wrist, but i’m stronger, fitter and row better than him. he doesn’t even go to the physio sessions laid out for him

it’s been months of me absolutely slaving myself trying to do anything i can to get back and now that i could have that chance in my final year and the fact that i keep getting lied to about having a chance that’s now being thrown away, it hurts so badly. it’s gotten to the point that everything else in my life is crashing down too because i’ve given so much to my rowing for nothing in return. on a three week camp we had, i cried myself to sleep each night because i wanted to get back and knew i could be there, but there wasn’t anything i could do to change it

honestly feels like i’m running into a brick wall each day then getting up and doing it again the next. don’t know if i can get back up anymore

the race that matters is in 5 weeks from today, but any advice that anyone can give is greatly appreciated. just really struggling with coping is all

tl:dr struggling with giving my rowing everything i have and keep getting denied a place in the top crew for no apparent reason and it’s tearing everything else down and i don’t know what to do",2.6661586239847104,4.160898931677021,3.751801242236027,90.22237935977068,75.21118012422359,6.444529383659817,22.73658225832139,7.010146845296331,0.5920223921006533,1836,50,394,18,39,594,226,483,0.153,0.743,0.10400000000000001,-0.9864,3,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,0,1,4,27,19,0,4,22,0,44,11,3,3,4,73,83,33,0,10,11,0,1,1,0,2,8,0,0,1,22,30,0,5,8,0,1,6,12,11,1,7,25,1,33,9,55,50,11,76,0,1,0,0,14,33,0,7,38,251,55,7,0.06909879604433451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350450875502226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05525828223194691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046989550808828176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06852743827560365,0.04831548482123114,0.0,0.11372484309099935,0.0,0.06459804664963767,0.0,0.06492059347692501,0.3187962536637517,0.17308382531514108,0.12636595415036694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06111226984711447,0.07543798884914198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790306145454132,0.0,0.07098349767691214,0.07309736404151791,0.05952249436665481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550929806358153,0.0,0.07590178282520471,0.044563007047825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072554571806662,0.0,0.07071205894292243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544635506238707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04563910310101668,0.0,0.058218715873988025,0.0,0.2484061694742333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03493842746653232,0.04936419370066486,0.0,0.1513887070882022,0.0,0.058775400616174624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28881015188425424,0.13257172303248832,0.03927043817437503,0.0,0.16579385847540806,0.07618166657905806,0.0,0.06841867178112962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300667180799694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397169030075244,0.078004129999692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18425455446630976,0.0,0.0,0.11392467364900137,0.11264948253917415,0.07794645166971571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04880652314028682,0.033758181432256694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749065080112606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030799952323993,0.0,0.10159113140391787,0.10247176343841707,0.05329325131504524,0.0,0.07348735350189951,0.06484453920679208,0.0,0.06630215840937392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22057797245559016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21658060481184507,0.0,0.06532069696657121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13892675048017278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770658324871819,0.07104507072180581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993167060552499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06914869836845611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05518238777955916,0.0,0.0,0.21671119374789893,0.07910158972865056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054856725648784584,0.0,0.0,0.06549757913987718,0.0660268607842121,0.0,0.09382709350001232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04075626019502146,0.0,0.16628065863491856,0.0,0.062128116075655535,0.0,0.062350915799814235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098171604337168,0.0,0.0,0.1779894366381318
mentalhealth,LongRunBurner,2020/02/15,"Hello There I apologize for not being very descriptive in the title, as I really don't know how to title this. I've had mental health issues since my early teens that have gradually worsened over the past few years, from mild anxiety and depressive moods, to outright suicidal thoughts and panic attacks on a semi-regular basis. I've also been hallucinating, mostly whispers and indecipherable babble, with one morning, waking up from a nightmare hearing screaming for the next half hour. I'm not in a good place and haven't been in a long time. I haven't seen a therapist or psychiatrist since September, doesn't help that what would be described as a tragedy only happen a few months earlier. No meds. Multiple hospitalizations over the years. Horrible circumstances in living in all but close to six years of my 21 years rotating on the globe. I'm far past my breaking point and I'm running on fumes. I don't know how much longer I can keep going, my situation shows no real sign in improving, infact, it looks like its only going to worsen within the next few weeks alone. I never thought I'd live this long, and, not saying this as a pessimist, I have no clue how far I'll go, but I'm just so lost and aimless. I really don't know anymore.",6.8282097649186255,7.161684084388185,7.442522603978302,71.85503164556964,64.69620253164557,10.484508740204943,32.540385774562985,10.290406445055957,3.361955033152502,996,37,175,22,14,330,145,237,0.188,0.777,0.034,-0.9825,0,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,2,1,14,0,15,2,1,3,2,31,33,18,1,1,7,0,0,1,0,1,1,4,0,0,8,9,0,1,5,1,0,4,13,6,0,3,7,6,12,2,26,23,6,39,0,2,2,0,5,18,0,2,17,108,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272170505943106,0.0,0.0982288162731694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396624926091278,0.0,0.1218164747827352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973928944540334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579514035603073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20942500385041188,0.1030257695104388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862005385527164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13056481866151934,0.13844074654250238,0.0,0.08233179282103477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209649131477442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12820483914049235,0.0,0.10917884793085396,0.0,0.0,0.20251599189919767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06000957807024158,0.0,0.21692605624899552,0.2174051534183618,0.10314805974275414,0.0,0.13408578845643762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13643881464547786,0.0,0.12378590454147165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804344055744844,0.0,0.0902957545782116,0.0,0.09473571708312907,0.0,0.261266744240783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08323423553851073,0.1868387517499613,0.0,0.1441170481228254,0.0,0.0,0.2345143486778275,0.0,0.0,0.12833344058178164,0.0,0.11611607313871848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398098642684249,0.15737882562682745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768104615181797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20321602750958864,0.1380684694258763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435842236236928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14261757934827402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19502999396484372,0.07162440737937488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134937776133666,0.0,0.0,0.09852853187552256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725642651358795,0.0,0.0,0.3163994783027111
mentalhealth,winningwriters,2020/02/15,"Creating opportunities for poets and writers struggling with mental health to be heard Dear poets and writers of r/mentalhealth,

I'm from a writers’ resources company called [Winning Writers](http://www.winningwriters.com/), and I'm also the mod or r/literarycontests.        Part of our mission at Winning Writers is to find and promote voices and themes        underrepresented in publishing,  including (but of course not limited       to) racial, cultural, national, religious, gender/sexual identity,   body     positive, and \[dis\]abled. I’m  posting here specifically   because our     long term goal is to change the  composition of our   entry pool to     include more entries featuring diverse  characters and   themes. These     voices need to be heard, and we are  actively   reaching out to find  them.

We are currently looking for new talent in humor poetry, short fiction and essay:

[The Wergle Flomp Humor Poetry Contest](https://winningwriters.com/our-contests/wergle-flomp-humor-poetry-contest-free) offers  a first prize of $1000, a second prize of $250, and ten       honorable  mentions of $100 each. Entrants are invited to submit humor       poetry on  any theme. The top twelve entries will be published   online.     The  contest is international and the deadline is April 1.   The  contest is     free to enter.

[The Tom Howard/John H. Reid Fiction & Essay Contest](https://winningwriters.com/our-contests/tom-howard-john-h-reid-fiction-essay-contest) offers  a two first prizes of $3,000 each (up from $2,000 last year,)      as   well as ten honorable mentions of $200 each. Entrants are   invited   to    submit short fiction and essays on any topic. The top   twelve   entries    will be published online. The contest is   international and  the  deadline    is April 30th. The fee for the   contest is $20.

We      started   implementing a policy of reaching out specifically to  groups       dedicated to connecting/celebrating underrepresented voices a  couple     of   years ago, and I'm glad to say that we have seen our  entry levels     from   these communities rise. We'll be continuing with  this effort   in   order  to  keep trying to get as many people into the  national  and     international  conversation on literature as we can.

Sometimes        when I post, there are some replies worried about a scam, so in     order    to head that off I just want to say that our competitions are     listed  by   The Write Life as some of the [top writing competitions out there](https://thewritelife.com/writing-contests/), and we’re in Writer’s Digest’s [top eight sites for writers](https://www.writersdigest.com/online-editor/top-websites-for-writers-best-publishing-marketing-resources). Besides contests, we also offer a lot of [free publishing and style resources](https://winningwriters.com/resources), including a [database of free poetry and prose competitions](https://winningwriters.com/the-best-free-literary-contests), at [https://winningwriters.com/](https://winningwriters.com/). And of course, stop by our subreddit for daily submissions opportunities worldwide, [r/literarycontests](https://www.reddit.com/r/literarycontests).

I        know this isn't a writing sub per se, but there are a lot of     talented    people here and I just wanted to reach out in case anyone     was looking    for an opportunity like this. Thanks for listening, and     have a good  day.",14.29461999315303,13.670959625984256,12.37312564190346,45.69272338240333,50.181102362204726,14.3465936323177,45.709003765833614,13.095310085998635,6.404533618623757,2662,120,333,70,23,833,248,508,0.016,0.835,0.149,0.9932,1,0,0,0,0,0,194.0,13,0,1,20,12,25,0,1,29,0,28,5,2,0,0,59,46,33,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,3,3,8,0,0,8,37,1,3,3,1,4,2,2,1,1,7,4,11,18,27,72,34,10,51,0,0,3,0,31,28,0,5,18,206,26,6,0.12986224097955962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511504118912334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20770157438683687,0.0,0.14070568384548165,0.0,0.1766215540641863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080269834040637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916281676339676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27256482008893634,0.0,0.0,0.14424767438167774,0.0,0.0,0.13260386750909772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373770318377132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14369009962458326,0.0,0.0837504021966668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373834712049156,0.22092151167411367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784766104548387,0.0,0.0,0.10892228646136308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327612450245782,0.1380374895291123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542752659218085,0.0,0.0,0.07136889145136474,0.1058550588807572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172554128659163,0.06344413134744993,0.0,0.0,0.11492399674050505,0.2181031515633705,0.0,0.0,0.2208084667262753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165992966858064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308705949823455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09629120620786284,0.0,0.12542176156090207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062815199786244,0.0,0.18006025342838072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24874425923885185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20654333263127747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12843707689768818,0.0,0.09191716256261843,0.0,0.0,0.10857064830513956,0.0,0.13576021038726974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955970395165605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816793724374376,0.0,0.12685653971539726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15319222868877946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676175046879625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188140937792894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672540509800408
mentalhealth,lemoncakes101,2020/02/15,"Is it possible to become so mentally ill that thinking of getting better can’t happen? i don’t know. my mom always says you have to choose to be happy and i’m just really lazy, and it’s felt in the past that it’s sort of degrading how i feel. i’m just trying to make some sense of what’s really applicable or not.",1.4143137254901958,3.0327161176470585,4.2741176470588265,84.60519607843139,79.0,8.062745098039215,20.15686274509804,8.841846274778883,1.274933333333334,248,6,54,6,6,89,50,68,0.141,0.765,0.094,-0.5211,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,2,0,15,14,5,0,0,4,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,3,4,2,8,12,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,3,1,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21834472889782006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898093539065238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320788193117129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326815223084632,0.0,0.2519531216635423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13709750763270614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320467954189813,0.27933851763627154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442127405679011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17515957965448584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644458499823729,0.0,0.0,0.3073294325895129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25049841700027115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958259336688464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3362109560557503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20867761456742187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814064475693086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815801256775532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ifeelreallyuseless,2020/02/15,"My story (content warning: possible abuse and definite suicidal ideation) My earliest memory is of being abused. It's so vague that I question that it actually happened. I don't remember the abuser's face. In my memory, they're just a dark figure. I don't remember specific actions, or occurrences, but I do remember going into a room. And something I didn't like happening in that room.

Sometimes I would wake up without my underwear on. I don't know if I took them off myself in my sleep, or if someone did it to me. I tend to take clothes off if I get hot, and I don't remember doing it, but. I don't know.

I feel like I'm fucked up and I'm making things up. I feel like I had occuring, extremely fucked up nightmares and I'm trying to blame innocent family. But sometimes things don't add up.

My parents divorced when I was young. My dad, I've come to learn, is an extremely manipulative and mentally abusive man. My mom couldn't handle it any more and got the fuck out. I lived with her for a while, and in high school I thought I found the love of my life.

I came out as a lesbian when I was 16. I was confident and comfortable with it. My mom accepted me. I found a girl who I thought was a great person and human being. Nothing could stop us. But love was blind. She eventually planted a seed in my mind that my mom wasn't good. That my family was strange and bad for me. I spent less time with my family after graduation. She said my friends didn't like me. That they talked about me behind my back. I spent less time with my friends. I only spent time with her. If I talked to anyone else she would get mad. She convinced me that I was probably transgender. She wanted me to change my body so she could love me better. I did everything to ""transition"" except for hormones and surgery. This made me feel horrible. I felt like a liar. Because, after much thought, I know I'm not trans. I'm a woman. At the time, I was convinced, though. 

I mostly stayed indoors at this time in my life. I stopped all of my hobbies. I dropped out of college. I buried myself in video gaming as escapism. I was miserable.

I got hospitalized for attempting suicide. I tried to set myself on fire, dousing myself in the alcohol she loved so fucking much. In some fucked up way, she must have loved me somehow, because she had the decency to talk me down and drive me to the hospital.

The nicest thing she did for me was dumping me after I got out. At the time it was devastating. She was all that I had. I thought I would do better, be better, that we could make it. Now I realize that she wasn't good. For anybody.

2-3 years pass.

I moved back in with my dad and brother. I lived there for a time, but I moved out due to a travelling job I no longer have, and my dad gave the house to my brother. I learned recently that my dad had hidden surveillance cameras in the house without my or my brother's knowledge. My brother found them during his cleaning of the house after I moved out.

As a kid I always felt like I was being watched. I thought I was just paranoid. Maybe I am. But this new development isn't helping.

I'm now living with my mother and step dad because I'm so fucked up that I can't hold a job for long. Without them I'd be homeless.

I feel like a leech. I don't have a job, I do art on the side. It doesn't pay much. Each time I try to get help, like a therapist or sign up for financial help, I have panic attacks. Phone calls scare me. Even typing this scares me. Even though it's anonymous, I'm frightened by the prospect of talking to people or making connections. Because I don't want to disappoint anyone. And I will. Eventually. And I'm afraid. Because every time I try to make friends, they end up being terrible. There are two exceptions, and I will hold on to those two wonderful human beings until the day I die. I'm thankful for them.

I don't know why I'm typing this. Probably because I know I'll never be able to get therapy. I feel like I can't tell anyone this. And right now I'm struggling. I feel like I'm a waste of space, and I feel like I'm a lost cause. Cursed at birth. I don't know what to do. I need help but I feel so fucking lost. I don't want to kill myself, but I'm so tired of living in constant fear and emptiness.

Please tell me that there's something worth living for.",1.2923274966612226,3.5047605494880583,3.0640682346540054,90.11208098382549,82.29920364050056,6.370089528614532,23.88881881584805,7.586124646067393,1.1694152841667904,3349,126,711,56,92,1112,332,879,0.204,0.667,0.129,-0.997,4,0,3,0,4,2,123.0,2,0,6,6,24,54,12,7,34,0,71,22,4,7,4,133,155,54,4,16,25,14,12,11,3,6,5,1,3,7,35,41,1,4,36,4,5,12,26,24,0,2,48,15,150,30,101,89,11,96,0,4,2,13,70,45,7,14,46,470,185,11,0.04382880098624112,0.20771984892048465,0.04277058738202027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04683965906477056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036469073472595336,0.0,0.0,0.029805087624270636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193835015988464,0.044907786058477735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04986158845299795,0.0,0.06740328513598096,0.03659521809327111,0.16030578166193699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162890382877918,0.0,0.04868391739980663,0.0,0.0,0.044754106160673136,0.0501284722024509,0.0,0.04502425181174737,0.04636505995182512,0.03775463118238614,0.0,0.04736336339931933,0.0,0.10498119361655572,0.0,0.0,0.028265950769886423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04548737574844252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036613339235099136,0.0,0.03881930859646072,0.0,0.0,0.05789701938429091,0.0,0.036927655151594366,0.0,0.03939050022903156,0.0,0.12395367871929455,0.04931958624151638,0.17728926949411522,0.18786782509187508,0.08416504444123739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144168054134994,0.10158606875978472,0.283633141847229,0.09159495819304443,0.0,0.024908917635595915,0.07352303764776162,0.10516168795759323,0.048321407816590695,0.0,0.0,0.07751532793058988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175100857184147,0.04630753461011818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517176553119782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047996625172384,0.0,0.048490074514164434,0.0,0.14452297679921575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191515661643406,0.23553792111988936,0.0,0.1935081712585432,0.038787109660889364,0.0,0.0,0.09568862741387812,0.0,0.1977860204036056,0.04147187122925484,0.11702425997813293,0.0,0.04403192158192864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044169122750122726,0.0,0.04425459480940429,0.15399528599533624,0.0,0.13974923764964006,0.0966576351940895,0.03249850057857701,0.033803473280463375,0.04233012910705743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04205491661559773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033333778151449125,0.0,0.05142365451463656,0.04866669670632074,0.0,0.0,0.030385372043159237,0.03826961846552309,0.0,0.048110861940974484,0.0,0.04941038771362796,0.0,0.0,0.0945097208401774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04909828779691044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04327565342796437,0.0,0.1985979504131179,0.03742955656574989,0.041691226432350965,0.0,0.08776055156675823,0.04435708650608576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04386045362214628,0.0,0.03713600084580703,0.06748310456137592,0.0866956097498636,0.0,0.0,0.04671567024380128,0.0,0.07328568029658647,0.0,0.045819379043754785,0.0,0.09588318915338387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03295380378006989,0.14091172010906616,0.07661660778915343,0.04035167136300876,0.05012205364564816,0.050888616049566834,0.08735372359012701,0.0,0.08612314887600929,0.17397586129248768,0.2300123368526233,0.05037475925659857,0.0,0.0,0.04869541056644413,0.1190275154864048,0.0,0.08562873997938293,0.0,0.05272065108851826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755408716028635,0.03478926216011679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039548675756181983,0.0,0.0,0.12674820034897774,0.04753046505810129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340416813267753,0.0,0.0,0.028224310851453206
mentalhealth,Sarorian,2020/02/15,"Currently in an hour long panic attack, need help. I’ve been in a panic attack for the past hour, I just found out I have work tomorrow morning which isn’t helping. I’ve been having thoughts of suicide with this panic attack. I would NEVER actually comit suicide, I know that effects of that on my family and I don’t want to die.  I just want these thoughts out of my head. Some help",1.8554870129870125,4.186426675324679,3.3351785714285747,88.29419642857144,80.94805194805195,5.927922077922077,22.61201298701299,7.1686216300943375,0.8758584415584414,302,10,60,4,8,99,51,77,0.34,0.551,0.10800000000000001,-0.9774,1,0,0,0,0,3,8.0,0,0,0,2,2,6,3,3,3,0,7,1,1,1,1,17,14,1,3,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,5,0,8,0,11,8,1,12,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,7,39,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.13799560930552052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.482622337031899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676109252486458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330861594012414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550485952340304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512729687086973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843521132890733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785204233489605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771515217503251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12514326219201072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048536076626758,0.10906398947285363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4977419510806351,0.0,0.0,0.13499169712827652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093588355753999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22452724129387952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16681437980151245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029480507469758,0.0,0.0,0.1004534960596348,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,galaxikk,2020/02/15,"Sometimes I feel like I just need to go crazy I just get so....passionate. Idk I probably have a flair for drama, but, especially when I’m drunk, I get so angry about everything. People in my life. The state of the world, etc, I get so fucking angry and if I wasn’t isolating myself during these ucndents I could see myself starting fights, unfortunately possibly getting violent.

Luckily I have some self control and ability to know that I’m not in a stable state of mind, so I’m able to control myself, but just the fact I have this capability and potential to be *so angry* worries me. Is there something really wrong with me? Is this normal? I get so worried I’m going to make a big mistake in one of these “incidents” and fuck up my life, or some one else’s.

If it matters I’m a 22 year old guy, maybe this is just an age thing.",2.41259481037924,4.356886107784433,4.650203592814371,81.55263073852295,77.1437125748503,8.046147704590819,26.10339321357285,8.841846274778883,2.140205908183633,648,25,129,15,15,225,101,167,0.272,0.6729999999999999,0.055,-0.992,0,0,1,0,1,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,12,7,4,0,8,0,9,5,0,3,1,29,29,15,0,6,10,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,8,5,1,2,2,2,0,2,2,6,0,2,1,2,18,1,15,26,3,15,0,0,1,2,3,6,2,5,6,84,26,0,0.1483240892074323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327161565988716,0.11842471599115012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390574400138467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654205671685739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333041273871575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499711614350535,0.105962758966344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742464608194789,0.3874660737993106,0.0,0.16859199605312186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686416779544398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815150404183613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20953138134330954,0.07246365784761409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990074813013894,0.0,0.14901148372146614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497650476546108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10998043273960097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532611523726735,0.0,0.0,0.15564118082580644,0.0,0.2010164830091125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282924771191863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721312447745576,0.0,0.0,0.15991845486793715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095020209601649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819509551375725,0.0,0.15473437332522372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11418713033124248,0.14669631686329113,0.0,0.10498455376091807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853993415920564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012606248255453,0.0,0.0,0.16216910724271955,0.0,0.0955158504532998
mentalhealth,mhjsb,2020/02/15,"Substance cravings while happy Hey everyone, 

I have BPD, ADHD, major depression, anxiety, and possible Bipolar. When I am really depressed, I get cravings for drugs or alcohol (usually weed). However, I've been in a good mood the past few days and started having those cravings again. I think it may be because my mood is so extreme either way (either super depressed or super happy) and it's just a lot to deal with so I try to find something to help me get out of my head. 

Does anyone else deal with these cravings even when you're happy?",4.616176470588236,6.435649784313724,5.694264705882354,76.94669117647061,70.76470588235293,8.237254901960785,31.37745098039216,8.841846274778883,2.914250980392157,426,19,71,8,8,141,75,102,0.109,0.711,0.18,0.8487,1,0,3,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,7,11,0,0,3,0,7,4,1,0,0,15,11,10,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,8,6,9,8,5,11,0,3,0,0,4,2,0,4,8,48,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18195463064856326,0.0,0.0,0.1618016697640173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582138262909218,0.0,0.0,0.1058631287263627,0.15512825914508066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229266987141638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906843121928707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764114691165582,0.3121756523448806,0.3912044865423199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324920720156748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755771419217969,0.0,0.12647614312656544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999896025912536,0.0,0.0,0.14467018365766587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383778094097348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15820159106096754,0.0,0.0,0.12698801074833152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4835076730905629,0.0,0.0,0.15538114816215812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148092696970956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287157516469562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445294258516579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706819262859562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699138426835244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165559188186192,0.0,0.0,0.1071624366937831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701167432535304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279136920558764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674685784376309,0.0,0.0,0.12017509989945124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jo-Martin,2020/02/15,"Social Interaction Hiii! Recently, I've been having this feeling of being ignored and the worst case is having to receive bad thoughts from my close friends.

When I was in elementary, I used to be a very quiet type of person and often shy. So when I knew that I would be transferring schools in high school, I took it as a chance to be someone else. I became so tired of being in everyone's shadow. I tried to grow in every aspect, most especially in terms of scoial interaction. But now that I would be entering college, I realized that it is better to live a quiet life than to experience a toxic one. It felt like every word you say and every reaction you make is a big deal.

I would like to ask for some advice on how to deal with people who keeps on saying offensive words as a joke or being to direct on their thoughts to the point that they often hurt the feelings of others.",7.103735632183906,6.222015695402298,7.818965517241383,73.43925287356323,64.45977011494253,10.491954022988507,31.97701149425287,9.725611199111238,2.870004597701149,697,22,131,12,9,234,109,174,0.12300000000000001,0.784,0.09300000000000001,-0.818,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,2,1,8,10,1,0,9,0,17,2,0,3,0,28,28,12,0,3,2,0,3,2,1,3,2,4,0,1,10,5,0,2,7,1,0,4,0,5,0,1,7,7,15,5,29,11,4,21,0,1,0,0,16,12,0,5,7,97,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14068007692306886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458702329133387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020403111870627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732456957885446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29684138318208697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026355349375137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638879536940887,0.13756389103242736,0.0,0.14082453895113564,0.0,0.0,0.14558517463243265,0.0,0.13822813673819914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122632597612064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521060024049623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15411657351503752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12796192918954502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168611912180248,0.14066719928354646,0.0,0.1271229600567013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609717144056024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755381702571436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980659760847196,0.12570392112997414,0.0,0.0,0.1360926315888128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214720562886524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289721012399007,0.0,0.2913987610688991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675329576550392,0.12198033606239073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22858286884811535,0.0,0.1654655838870629,0.0,0.0,0.1599494401740787,0.09774219092672168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433878114306672,0.0,0.118785480395563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3068039519322251,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BobbyBoyPacquiao,2020/02/15,"The concept of existence gives me anxiety attacks. Thoughts like why am i here, and why do we exist? Is life worth living, and does it have any meaning? How do i get over this? I have a history of depression, but it’s gotten better compared to last year. I’ve been dealing with OCD since I was about 8 years old, and i sometimes struggle with severe anxiety. Coming from an Asian household, mental issues were not really taken seriously.",3.5689024390243915,6.122735097560978,4.812378048780489,78.81661585365855,76.07317073170732,7.514634146341463,28.542682926829272,8.472884824447931,2.5502634146341463,346,15,58,7,8,114,68,82,0.168,0.726,0.105,-0.6656,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,1,3,6,1,1,3,0,9,1,0,1,0,12,16,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,4,0,0,6,0,7,2,8,10,0,6,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349968421287448,0.0,0.3003580681165626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233345661231025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17362304141432608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691064090788907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20239025325662133,0.16908424154094678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17179497381251602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256552629881843,0.18832147632563428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20489994072505185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16002143122102447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866179426283234,0.09590869636405402,0.0,0.1733481215105706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138425880978181,0.0,0.0,0.1978374971895547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20599764346641505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257632405239309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217779983743849,0.0,0.16239227891181812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19415874011429984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052291444427837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15585072478899192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35428419409767525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25283848403966674
mentalhealth,CoolbreezeFromSteam,2020/02/15,"Do I have anhedonia? I am not depressed (I think), nor sad on an average day, but I am basically never happy or excited about anything, and my expression never betrays that (Flat affect? *google*). A big issue here is that I don't feel any comfort or attachment to people I get along with, or have known and have been 'friends' with for years. Do I maybe, specifically, have social anhedonia?",4.3912499999999985,6.477962291666668,5.970555555555558,73.63000000000002,71.91666666666666,9.244444444444444,30.055555555555557,9.725611199111238,3.2161222222222223,303,13,53,8,6,103,53,72,0.12,0.741,0.14,-0.1414,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,2,0,11,0,0,1,2,16,14,7,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,1,8,4,7,13,0,6,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,3,4,41,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20159275368203114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24394896190904025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19118248947881006,0.0,0.25532762910603146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14989149036459598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22903265817321802,0.0,0.15488026807955246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3155711963222401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3094115429829957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978188299095621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4572732916293403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055176250126315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3021883275374023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18994997490975324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19090084944721988
mentalhealth,coleaberdeen,2020/02/15,"Any suggestions? Dear members of this subreddit,

I was always looking forward to my therapy sessions, but as of lately I’m feeling worse; more depressed, more frequent and intensive mood swings, hallucinations, paranoia and anxiety. I’m no longer seeing the point of therapy. I no longer see it as relieving, soothing and a tool to clarify my conditions/to deal with them. I can’t get out of my bed or my house, my social life is dying and my pets are the only reason I’m still alive. I haven’t felt so horrible since the spring of 2018 when I attempted suicide. Back then I wasn’t using as many meds yet, so my situation should have been better by now, but it’s bad and deteriorating vastly. I’m sort of afraid? Fearful? Of therapy. It seems useless, confusing and confrontational. Life is passing faster than I can handle and I want to just pause it all, yet I can’t. There’s too much going on and happening. All I want is just some peace of mind, a goodnight sleep and away from all the chaos. I’m an introverted person and keep most things to myself, I’ve handled a lot without any help, got clean by quitting cold turkey and am juggling many other things on the side such as uni. I could get through this on my own, but I’m finding it to be a bit more challenging this time, so I’d greatly appreciate any advice or suggestions to help me find the peace I so long for.
Thanks in advance!

Yours truly,

-Cole A.",4.2032763975155225,5.74434341666667,5.269047619047623,80.69500000000002,71.35507246376811,8.445548654244305,29.084886128364392,8.976282227363876,2.385275569358177,1117,44,215,22,21,368,167,276,0.192,0.66,0.147,-0.9612,0,0,0,0,0,1,38.0,0,1,1,5,15,14,1,3,12,0,16,3,1,2,3,42,38,26,2,4,8,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,3,1,11,13,0,1,6,0,0,4,7,7,0,0,5,6,24,6,32,30,12,26,0,2,3,0,9,10,0,8,14,140,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146526911089564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09762725494640576,0.0,0.0,0.239363543774798,0.0,0.08975648145990044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11023460216946993,0.09021887692239466,0.0979649425230338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376810182218073,0.12809304788943154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936777820937613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12096120559040688,0.10105542818408107,0.0,0.12176913768794248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202791739334824,0.059325145472815165,0.0,0.11265438724971673,0.0,0.21447344182587488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225992804840149,0.0,0.06668086191651433,0.0,0.09383884246054117,0.12935580619629658,0.0,0.0,0.10375378315849756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572865171064249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538209049140146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428754278473998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235239590634604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16574610223046835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383260891843993,0.09852693903125022,0.0,0.0,0.09974905077152182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23790669268794806,0.0,0.0,0.1303262398303655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846899848591437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862504280574521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923410846628403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244729144113937,0.0,0.0,0.11091397440939624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247939973235049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206339111780262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18699228973310747,0.10681205498151056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970558884119806,0.13188288469204051,0.11741388744224525,0.11960229661961858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369921372951144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283390508890503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080209210861996,0.4025283378842764,0.0,0.15589655254718085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841557307637894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101334717602237,0.0,0.0,0.13840754952773096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310111729569312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195684313615212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EvolRoams,2020/02/15,"They’re inconsiderate I’m by definition not a “nice guy” that part of me has been killed off by the long line of women I trusted that let me down but I get my flaw is what I’m attracted to. I understand and own my mistakes even as I repeat them. My friends, my true friends that I confide in and above all wish that if anyone could understand and accept me it would be them. I accept them unconditionally and live them, which by and far is no small task. I just want a little return. My last relationship hurt me so badly I just want a little consideration but my friends keep twisting the dagger. They get mad at me when they go in the attack talking about my ex and I defend her in any way. I proposed to that woman and gave it my all, when I had to break it off it destroyed me. I hide my feelings so much but I’ve been pretty open about how they depress me pushing shit about my ex. So tonight when they played the song she used to sing to me and I stood up and said “I’ve told you repeatedly this shit depressed me” and my best friend (who I just recently had an in depth talk with about it) tried to say “I mean but did you tell anyone?” And I’m like fine then I’m leaving and her tool of a bf throws up the peace sign........see the old me would have just started hitting him until he was in the hospital but I’m older and trying to be better and explain my feelings and be more open but the level of how inconsiderate they can be just has me removing myself and wanting to disassociate even more. The slow cracking of my second hand heart matches the crumbling of my psyche and the ever looming failing of my waning patience.",3.5978603603603614,4.6503512822822834,4.8104391891891884,85.28701013513515,72.21321321321321,7.231681681681683,26.187312312312308,7.492282038375204,1.1941492492492487,1279,41,271,14,24,423,174,333,0.161,0.6629999999999999,0.17600000000000002,0.7179,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,9,3,21,27,6,0,16,0,20,4,4,3,4,58,46,35,1,9,13,2,3,1,5,2,0,3,0,3,14,20,0,1,9,3,0,4,2,12,0,1,10,6,57,15,36,27,8,42,0,4,0,0,36,19,2,1,18,195,71,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107784597868029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673134215128851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563691675083406,0.0,0.0,0.0995488251377035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512045100875094,0.10544580905295653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519235053649007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20537855462218066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749544773831464,0.10784684596480834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205686111958576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3684551997884848,0.0,0.12458144740953513,0.0,0.06775894817064472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180525975935509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412835191779911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763402096323656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597364825971166,0.13190603035680093,0.0,0.0,0.09718519583265793,0.0,0.1262432398668808,0.0,0.1219167794129756,0.0,0.05824785697186596,0.2389917761659609,0.10527884301296486,0.10551135909035013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298721905126816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764491214522563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510775068433005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291102629954844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121295820531147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772140405995885,0.1280042273416092,0.0,0.0,0.1134113369487923,0.09481339126319953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447677854548748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438885716452242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19165886850623454,0.10420887876671607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139256612794085,0.0,0.16189341043864602,0.0,0.0,0.2482371788818521,0.0,0.102973082239004,0.0,0.0,0.21096795329259546,0.0946361397989315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710414714740354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16938962128647225,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GeckHeckK,2020/02/15,"Today just wasn't good Today I just felt really depressed. I haven't felt this bad in quite a long time. Recently I've started and stopped 2 medications, realized I'm toxic, and my relationship isn't going well. I've been trying so hard but I genuinely just can't care about the majority of people. I do feel a little bit of empathy for them but not very much. I've lost the majority of my friends because of this. For some reason though I can get very attached to a few people but I get way too attached and I'm hurting. Everything is starting to hurt more and more every day and I can tell I'm only getting worse.",1.7328205128205134,4.012627349206351,4.016984126984127,83.52587912087914,81.06349206349206,7.051526251526253,24.77167277167277,8.139509932561175,1.7196808302808306,490,19,97,10,13,169,79,126,0.23600000000000002,0.732,0.033,-0.9712,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,2,8,9,0,0,5,0,9,1,0,1,0,19,23,10,0,0,7,0,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,5,0,0,1,5,5,1,0,5,4,10,4,10,18,8,13,0,4,0,0,4,2,0,1,9,57,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422749647859972,0.0906966673266399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243237882649736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15169406976537814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595265399923918,0.0,0.12814648307408155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253559997542723,0.0,0.13371646579671742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522909839490541,0.0,0.28570980873229224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494928988596825,0.0,0.233198753947503,0.0,0.08455674372468615,0.12479202716054705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328024335003613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185503167481333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911954003978767,0.0,0.13166817359941288,0.0,0.0,0.1624140973118742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988310650089967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937254156266754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315609043163448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20629464149506327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582489150076418,0.0,0.0,0.09531412759857193,0.1529735882052337,0.14690515220129416,0.1597371408384707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21061858724575214,0.0,0.0,0.1243891560882648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300428016314979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14617843165262626,0.0,0.08675649823842764,0.0,0.2820575614321411,0.0,0.0,0.1010138143135064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455229281449975,0.0,0.1180969309015719,0.0,0.0,0.13377368405669346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162247333960951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shirtlesssleeves,2020/02/15,"I only feel relaxed enough to eat food in a bath tub Kinda rambling but Okay so- I have like HELLA anxiety. And I’m also prescribed Vyvanse which is terrible for your appetite. Which is NOT good. I’m not underweight per say. But I would be a lot better if I gained a few more pounds. 

I’m a female. I was born originally in Mexico City and currently live in a Midwest state notorious for cold weather. My friends hypothesis that my extremely high metabolism and anxiety is set in motion because of the cold. It’s like my body’s in constant fight or flight mode. And I never noticed how much the cold had affected my mental health until this past winter. I even think to an extent the winter sets off my depression. If it’s super cold, I genuinely won’t have the motivation to get up. I just chatter inside my own home even with layers on. So in general this cold ass fucking weather and climate goes against the natural physiology of my body to the point that biologically I’m always more inclined to “rest” than to do shit, and that includes eating.

But I found a weird loop hole. 

For some reason, I only feel relaxed enough to eat when I’m in a hot bath. Something in my brain just relaxes enough where I can actually focus on the process of eating. I feel my breathing is more relaxed. I enjoy the taste of my food. I feel good. I even noticed that I can get some writing and reading done when I’m in the tub. I’ve basically incorporated bathtub time in my everyday life to the point that I have a food bucket and stuff.

Any ideas why this is? It’s make it hard to socialize.",3.2028739316239334,5.177007983974363,4.952564102564106,80.13688034188039,74.9294871794872,7.827350427350428,27.901709401709404,8.626192665926032,2.2227619658119657,1249,51,239,25,27,424,169,312,0.131,0.72,0.149,0.7912,1,0,1,0,1,0,28.0,0,1,0,4,12,19,3,0,19,1,17,17,6,6,1,40,33,21,0,3,10,0,6,2,1,2,2,1,3,0,15,9,8,0,9,7,0,1,4,6,0,0,4,13,30,13,34,26,14,35,0,1,0,2,6,18,3,7,15,157,45,3,0.0,0.0,0.09705392328626004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953428314106406,0.08275468904638322,0.0,0.0,0.06763294275079895,0.0,0.1521659032037545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062696348153624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796003742952876,0.0,0.22094460112940675,0.0,0.11102488891371727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747573319203887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566061332374507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177719411991666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4070699721217682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082914060258049,0.0,0.1970676540271772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011501386136234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36078484804050864,0.10904748740352836,0.0768388365919388,0.09194472475211138,0.1039224685702227,0.0,0.0,0.1668365971199718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909231931634044,0.0,0.0,0.10571622106092096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507987350006676,0.09976166920401704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227280890720673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024814514277926,0.09717756875215544,0.0,0.08782075888200726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455324984606755,0.0,0.0,0.06638711463735679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002274439844115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311101144788128,0.0,0.07670597724712068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264607963356179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15128031413998974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494123677778256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18803461119923687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948210852759494,0.0,0.0,0.10225650422586326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909076253702235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020893279852453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138204614503724,0.0,0.07656546769768817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385240330090365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372687283616453,0.0,0.0,0.05799312373346914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974284380595646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065011669192575,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,njrank,2020/02/15,"The human spirit is to grow strong by conflict. Hello world, I wanted to say hello to all of my Reddit fellows! How are you?

Today I felt more of myself than I have in a long time because for the first time I wasn't afraid of any consequences. I wasn't afraid to be me and to show my feelings. I sit here writing to anyone who's reading the words that I write and feel every thought coming their way. You are not alone, and the feelings you have will subside once you find your love, your passion... It is your love and passion that drives you, don't let the negative emotions dictate your life, never.

You are stronger than you think <3

You are more willing than others perceive you to be <3

You are compassionate and willing to sacrifice everything for what you believe in <3",3.6589827935222665,5.690990940789478,3.8752631578947394,88.10414979757088,73.80263157894737,5.992712550607287,26.823886639676108,6.67199483983844,1.1404801619433194,621,23,118,5,13,192,90,152,0.027999999999999997,0.8170000000000001,0.155,0.9645,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,15,1,2,2,8,0,2,6,0,18,5,0,1,2,23,28,6,0,1,1,0,4,0,1,3,1,1,0,1,6,6,0,1,8,2,0,3,6,2,0,1,4,5,27,6,19,18,3,14,2,0,0,4,27,3,0,0,6,90,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20632847475690252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354742229995318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13929698523043174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144068314083653,0.0,0.0,0.2244490598565569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17160759225222444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22409203249902374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678487059633104,0.0,0.1790431713995512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30218992727408905,0.0,0.1912793235694559,0.0,0.1820805024891277,0.16945366773896658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037126265776878,0.14071268369087686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17630055680251355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35960179378944146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15364824069925126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212159339471204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19927066318538705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15842515740625535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765005085583642,0.0,0.1581558486013735,0.2323297806530717,0.0,0.18883418737976398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175032020363544,0.158128985201538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigkidmallredditor,2020/02/15,"My brain anthropomorphized my mental health issues into someone I used to love: suggestions appreciated Tldr for the back story: i was best friends with someone for years up until this past December when they basically became abusive, manipulative, and started gaslighting me, trashtalking me behind my back, and lying through their teeth to me, until I called them out about it and they wanted to fix things but couldn’t give me the space I needed so they decided it wasn’t worth their time to fix things even after we agreed to try. 

For the last two months I’ve basically been working on myself (working out more/eating better, doing stuff that’s healthy for me, figuring out relationships with people, etc.) and I’ve gotten over this person (mind you i still will get angry whenever i see them, for obvious reasons) but ever since this shitshow happened it feels like all my mental health issues have basically taken this persons form in my head. All my anxiety and depression immediately goes directly back to my thinking “you’ll never get any better with anyone than that person” or thinking about what they’re probably doing right now versus my doing homework or working out or an actual job or whatever. I know it’s not healthy but I also don’t know what to do to change how my brain represents those issues to myself.",9.627624999999998,9.007665845833337,9.172500000000003,64.92250000000004,59.29166666666666,11.5,36.66666666666667,10.686352973137794,4.034791666666667,1073,40,168,21,12,345,145,240,0.064,0.8079999999999999,0.127,0.9337,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,2,7,6,13,7,0,0,4,0,12,7,4,4,5,43,29,18,0,3,9,0,1,1,1,2,2,0,1,3,16,14,0,0,8,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,5,2,34,6,34,21,5,28,0,1,1,1,19,11,0,4,18,130,50,5,0.0,0.1283507788967863,0.1057123473348337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662973612758075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366664729525219,0.0,0.08287050264083068,0.0,0.0,0.07574534588987925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498922715098945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368338690581685,0.19161434620029846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418593957307809,0.1106148384837456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459649310049315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330261159959308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208141790268494,0.07154951799161685,0.0979887349953034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05477381181401367,0.07738943198576352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369382202771307,0.0,0.11319365277986652,0.10391793700785247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095793952942259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11117561849821232,0.23029486086319315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33919836784351304,0.107498667947045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190682979154444,0.08830164957276976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052923511761512027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777010682658924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21833797155653314,0.0,0.10938023964619907,0.0,0.08646624999442093,0.0,0.0,0.08032372224254339,0.08354910996733951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034111827612486,0.07510088591102419,0.2837630797630525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679573566220085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137906357568846,0.0,0.11630356176895923,0.0,0.09251138519389818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632326483890475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960991035000099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835716580169724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667500414383208,0.0,0.08651075457190552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400946190657065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439364094873676,0.13882421416287302,0.0,0.0,0.06316683583271886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354749390693767,0.0,0.10582056100485,0.0,0.0,0.09356047436435827,0.0,0.0,0.06389456790244735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365918775121425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975957859464414
mentalhealth,whoisshe9,2020/02/15,"I think I’m just going to end up as a failure. Please please someone just reach out to me. I’m 20 and I really don’t know where I’m going to end up in life. I am going to be doing a program that helps people who have had a first episode of psychosis, and they have career counsellors to help me, but I would love to have someone to talk to. When things get too hard, I just give up and can’t find it in myself to continue trying. All throughout high school I was a shit student because I would get too stressed by the work and just give up. I might possibly have schizophrenia as I have delusional thoughts from time to time. I had a psychotic episode last year. I’m taking risperidone, but if I can’t manage my stress my symptoms could get even worse and I could have full blown schizophrenia. I can already imagine ending up in a really bad mental hospital and have a completely miserable life. During my psychosis, I remember I thought that my creepy childhood orthodontist was after me, and I remember being so angry at it that I said aloud “I’m going to kill him. I’m going to torture him.” I know I was just venting at the time but I’m so scared of one day relapsing into psychosis and then taking that step forward and actually hurting someone. I’m scared of hurting the people I love....god I love my family so much. I would love to kill myself before this happens but I’m just too scared to. 

A couple days ago I reversed my car out of the driveway and scraped my dads car. There wasn’t enough room and for some reason the thought of asking him to move the car didn’t cross my mind. My parents were angry, not just for dads car, but because my car is really nice and they paid for it and I put a huge dent in it. It just reminds me that my family puts so much goddamn effort in so I can live under their roof and I just waste it. I had to quit my job because I had irresponsibly not studied the products for it and i knew I was going to get fired. I’m so fucking stupid. I know that the solution is to stop avoiding the things that stress me out, but it’s such a painful process and one that could maybe cause me schizophrenia from the stress as I know it can trigger it. Mental illness fucking sucks. Life sucks.",3.2784668989547012,4.70541462305987,4.218133671206843,87.77152106430155,73.50110864745011,6.928121634463098,26.854672157111178,7.447530270364453,1.3319082800126707,1749,63,361,20,35,565,193,451,0.25,0.6809999999999999,0.069,-0.9986,2,1,0,0,0,1,37.0,0,0,3,4,23,26,9,9,20,0,37,13,1,3,1,66,81,34,2,7,18,3,2,0,0,4,7,1,2,0,22,20,0,2,14,0,1,17,7,22,0,3,17,3,58,4,51,55,6,57,0,3,0,5,20,23,5,3,19,246,80,7,0.0,0.0,0.06993065767062458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352302454612935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907953589722383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699322629736483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059833820985544475,0.13105137696490154,0.0,0.06097810987652545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361543838995509,0.0,0.0,0.07513504348517823,0.0,0.0,0.17164608582717444,0.07929137349212535,0.0,0.09243064676051624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19041074345478404,0.07404481978538148,0.0,0.047331319144033684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511095364221345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06549672359245097,0.06095468699779561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249861218479905,0.14975935702125973,0.13748724462083842,0.2443590933033891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633694577692311,0.0,0.06419405081458465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606552166120907,0.07571362818720803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342885566787315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711123415360567,0.0,0.158564238128681,0.0,0.15753172814478175,0.05841316160037691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184854430314956,0.0,0.0,0.0632778482085489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25870687931106706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199296112589867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14443457486623507,0.07602084311146806,0.07235703574343734,0.0,0.0,0.07616414843311978,0.10535794824975832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711850043712536,0.0,0.07625220261472694,0.0,0.07957089943451401,0.0,0.0,0.0993612283864953,0.0,0.0,0.1573241997629095,0.0,0.08078684722546217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407790508210294,0.0,0.07622014063009805,0.0,0.0,0.1377233368566371,0.07367929445285977,0.0,0.0,0.16235555944534022,0.0,0.06816588365898467,0.0,0.2152350527870028,0.07252461145827838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355883827697872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18215403070399608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059911683877573035,0.32834907098934923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448306721515491,0.10776008991907134,0.05759828110794413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521657622754534,0.04591738260369892,0.0,0.17067214378418502,0.12535806320040466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048653016876521855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216995621002592,0.0,0.07302853381377218,0.15271744688363925,0.0,0.0,0.0461472413860742
mentalhealth,LiquorStoreJen,2020/02/15,"Can someone explain what this is Everytime I try to go out and see friends now I get super sad and dip out early, and when I say super sad I mean I never knew it was possible to feel this low, and in addition to having multiple suicide attempts under my belt I watched that Futurama episode with the dog. My internal dialogue has always been negative since I was 3 but it's been getting way worse the last three years and I think it's related because it kicks into overdrive whenever I'm at a social event just constant whispering in my ear things like you're ugly and fat nobody wants you to come, you're stupid don't speak, everyone's going to laugh at you behind your back if you show up, they're going to make fun of your limp, you should have drank more bleach, you're one call away from hydro that's about as good a death as you can hope for, even your cat won't miss you when you're gone. I don't know what to do, I don't even know what's wrong. This internal narrative is right but it's still exhausting, it's different from my normal one because it's a voice I can physically here instead of just a stream of thoughts",3.6650811359026383,4.8409293620689695,4.6858012170385415,85.7746146044625,72.1896551724138,8.389858012170384,27.00912778904665,8.841846274778883,1.8938140973630824,900,31,189,17,17,294,141,232,0.151,0.73,0.11900000000000001,-0.8369,1,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,9,0,3,12,15,1,0,6,0,18,4,2,1,1,31,40,13,2,5,5,0,2,1,1,2,2,5,0,0,16,12,2,0,8,1,0,5,6,7,0,3,8,9,24,8,28,30,1,29,0,4,2,0,15,12,0,2,12,118,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13652763859770894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15415848713781435,0.12616733134526548,0.0,0.20004319404413096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754394476896614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14134032347523146,0.0,0.17731210434543682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17142859501150434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167464809415266,0.0,0.0,0.15678539618666673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296373820318309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12676774009280295,0.0,0.17144997334452833,0.0,0.2797512013049825,0.1376224531742264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629683841419617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18034806724968885,0.1337470352244172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016116149600917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952462149514716,0.0,0.0,0.17873113585201886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654855042726645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16076348529935267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22236960203884884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849754576794518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012335617797472,0.0,0.13048293901532984,0.0,0.0,0.13075045368864832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13572860636268766,0.0,0.0,0.16725881658050698,0.1390243847639966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103443701223513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794768025319585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090074088248952,0.1051357882410928,0.0,0.13026112951904145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139949599845568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677858868146044,0.1302390041481732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721145743145505,0.0,0.17939563612265672,0.0,0.10566208967420664
mentalhealth,Tazeka,2020/02/15,There's just never a good time to be dizzy for 3 days straight... I'm trying to get off of Pristiq and the withdrawal is just three days of brain zaps/dizziness. I was on the lowest available dose. I can't cut the pills in halves or quarters or anything cus that's not how they work. I just had to pick a weekend and go for it. But as stated... There's just never a good time to be dizzy for three days straight.,1.331637931034482,3.1055647356321856,2.2144683908045977,98.55549568965515,79.80459770114942,4.8097701149425305,21.219827586206893,5.148860815047168,-0.3115275862068967,320,9,75,1,8,100,57,87,0.13699999999999998,0.805,0.059000000000000004,-0.7505,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,7,3,1,0,6,0,6,3,1,2,2,14,9,7,0,0,8,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,1,0,3,2,0,4,2,13,5,0,15,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,8,49,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22146492223965195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004297622617427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5206853290295396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14060542114331262,0.0,0.1529485431718014,0.4514544414294708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41512779222533225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138550382086326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827165410931866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959244166065042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,babypumpkins99,2020/02/15,"I don't want to be here anymore. My purpose is gone and no sign of it returning. My kids are my world and have been since they were born. I've sacrificed everything for them and they've never been in need. We've always had a close affectionate relationship and they are loving humans. Until a month ago.

We had a disagreement and they won't move forward with me to heal, refuse counseling, etc.

I had a major surgery a few weeks ago and I'm struggling through a brutal recovery. They won't visit, only make excuses, and there is no hope. I really would rather not be feeling this tragic heartache. I don't even have the strength anymore.

I can't fathom, nor do I care to, my life going forward without them.",2.8916934144991693,5.120648661870508,3.94546762589928,85.81971776425016,76.76978417266187,7.1546209186496945,25.800221361372447,8.139509932561175,1.700091975650249,560,21,109,10,13,181,90,139,0.175,0.7340000000000001,0.091,-0.8325,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,6,1,4,8,1,1,7,0,21,3,0,1,1,22,31,9,0,5,3,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,2,10,0,1,1,0,0,6,11,3,0,0,7,1,18,5,10,19,3,17,0,1,0,1,14,5,0,1,10,76,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3628235372008874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028696965275272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40591985009904014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20865648974722895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282412265227377,0.1351708042471411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18392814180344708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347826795212316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163085238423464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032657458209789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455185437753068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847065408969965,0.0,0.13660688845376634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633513806948306,0.2175128305039261,0.0,0.15174696406649002,0.15784034198163727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15564716972458506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13110539732237186,0.0,0.0,0.2197198027659559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692903598867435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21394684497797806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070913086247903,0.0,0.16415959729881704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972773539438044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537900408686513,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AntiNIrvana2000,2020/02/15,"Idk what to think So my mother just told me, If you hurt yourself im gonna let the government do whatever they need to do with your body. I just dont know how to cope with this someone please help",2.7145736434108514,3.3297789069767454,3.720930232558139,93.91457364341088,73.88372093023256,7.593798449612403,23.635658914728683,7.793537801064563,0.7382775193798445,155,4,38,2,3,50,36,43,0.107,0.7809999999999999,0.11199999999999999,0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,2,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,1,1,0,9,9,3,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,6,0,5,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,23,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425736730195436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614538950234841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20672053437486232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301589840321819,0.0,0.33313542106511435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16949391654755605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153698341843962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228681899597404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33854125895220705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613145550003649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976164955915606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946987041490931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xOFlyYl7,2020/02/15,"I'm here to flag another account I'm under attack. Let's see if the FBI kicks down my door.

 [https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/9m860o/i\_have\_a\_gun\_and\_im\_going\_to\_go\_kill\_someone/](https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/9m860o/i_have_a_gun_and_im_going_to_go_kill_someone/)",41.693636363636365,54.18868972727274,18.20045454545455,-25.62931818181817,15.36363636363636,5.836363636363638,19.13636363636364,7.1686216300943375,1.0455090909090918,282,3,17,2,4,59,20,22,0.147,0.853,0.0,-0.4767,0,0,0,2,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5194835476564241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.563603613767037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5065931834930864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39477988386108587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shamedthoway,2020/02/15,"Severe anxiety over rejection I got rejected by a friend recently and I feel like I'm loosing it, I don't really care that much about it to be honest but intrusive thoughts are making it hard to forget anything that had to do with the time spent with her. They are driving up a wall and i felt like i had delt with it and gotten closure with this issue but the anxiety still resides.",3.704329004329004,5.26037425974026,5.046168831168831,81.74163419913421,72.63636363636364,8.769696969696971,28.417748917748927,9.2995712137729,2.5455385281385294,306,12,59,7,6,102,53,77,0.192,0.6940000000000001,0.115,-0.4977,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,2,7,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,1,0,14,16,5,0,0,2,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,7,3,7,5,11,8,1,7,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,43,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3939381766710681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118815121455603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625148122801432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018803354467298,0.1839415157297502,0.2472181573147812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19892597846984453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059277608622861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306486873073005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687389406763395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515803701193877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718677991854369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892751131361556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649462655520069,0.0,0.2542273307898976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29087555680861243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056213479614121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044078613943328,0.15013682396661113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jn487664,2020/02/15,Would an therapist have the power to demand to speak to your attorney or case manager ? So I've been seeing this therapist for about a year and a half. I got framed for a crime recently and now I'm having to face trial for it. I was talking to her about and she wanted  to talk to my attorney or my case manager about this and get more info. I told her that it is not needed and she wouldn't leave it alone. She started claiming that im hiding stuff from her and that it wasn't too much of her to ask. She said that she never felt this way before but now she is losing my trust and says that she thinks that I did it and now I'm lying to her and everyone about it and saying that I didn't do it. She claims that I'm breaking laws by not letting her talk to my attorney and case manager. She said if she doesn't have permission by next week then she is firing me as a client. Does she have the power to demand to speak to my attorney and etc ?? Is she crossing the line by firing me over something like this ??,3.0466978193146415,3.7763613644859824,4.475869158878506,88.38330529595017,73.2056074766355,7.949657320872274,23.145171339563866,8.238735603445708,1.0423492834890964,788,19,177,12,15,263,100,214,0.10099999999999999,0.853,0.046,-0.8971,2,1,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,3,9,3,0,0,8,0,18,1,1,0,1,27,33,19,0,5,6,0,3,1,0,2,0,6,0,0,20,12,0,0,3,0,0,1,7,1,0,1,10,10,32,2,27,20,3,14,0,1,1,0,31,1,0,3,11,134,52,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631436920182169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472603674329837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403831046929596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13784721702372332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17567695278431736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051755097588662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15124434516677973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229793950954102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598350251280466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014912863910572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16679142415001105,0.0,0.16107534381654945,0.0,0.07695654062956613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17622510380182602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11579566344795501,0.11679942597406485,0.12148949043176566,0.0,0.16752479741472162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15553245193012935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996760606649854,0.2505331861564493,0.0,0.0,0.12552341325699992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12126694671126315,0.0,0.0,0.11149379312274084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18032324152389131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37982693959901614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3657867924603336,0.0,0.1009327510779634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051755097588662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290964917352984,0.12503241005037213,0.12635341240984718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11189801608542872,0.0,0.0,0.10143801243976193
mentalhealth,vangoghingforward,2020/02/15,"Help Save Lives PLEASE SIGN this petition to help ELIMINATE pro-self harm, pro-eating disorder, and pro-suicide websites from Google’s search results. Link below:

http://chng.it/QMwQwKqk

When struggling from a mental illness, many people turn to the internet for help. When I did this, it almost cost me my life. Instead of finding sources of support or advice, I found pages and pages of harmful websites. Pro-self harm, pro-eating disorder, and most disturbingly, pro-suicide websites are all easily accessible through the Google search engine. These websites list “tips and tricks” that could be very detrimental to a person’s health, and in some cases life threatening.

While there are helpful resources included in these search results, such as the suicide hotline and crisis text line, it is not enough. When going through a mental health crisis, many people do not have the strength to click on a website that promotes recovery when there is one doing the exact opposite beneath it.

Google values responsibility, helpfulness, and thoughtfulness, and these websites go completely against their values. I believe that if Google could eliminate all websites from their search results that contain pro-self harm, pro-eating disorder, and pro-suicide content, thousands of lives could be saved.

Please sign and share this petition- You could save lives.",10.619999999999996,11.858022764705884,7.859004524886878,68.99628959276019,56.647058823529406,10.419909502262444,41.43438914027149,10.214889679676881,4.653418099547512,1105,54,151,20,13,315,122,221,0.18100000000000002,0.645,0.175,-0.6796,0,0,0,0,0,4,45.0,0,1,2,2,8,13,1,2,9,0,14,5,0,3,3,37,20,18,1,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,13,10,0,1,4,0,1,2,2,7,0,2,3,1,8,6,21,11,7,12,0,0,1,0,10,5,0,5,5,95,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116951500209708,0.0,0.0,0.093424254110855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051146538850564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782095174400242,0.0,0.0,0.2979627561238529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207820311481823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28640077538125475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640155122220698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527248459224357,0.0,0.0,0.10229620486116593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604656169951024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19834236375897213,0.0,0.0,0.3126776908213718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13179796834842344,0.0,0.0,0.2471509584190436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891786191699675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18804444534516893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322099318797901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12936187265450289,0.08146402656254394,0.0,0.2048259006625484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919898094574675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09753510124127364,0.0,0.4082105325993573,0.1058732199624926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406801924791001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148119815417447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769804429583642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wildef,2020/02/15,"Animal Abuse, as the Abuser So.... I hate to admit this, but I was abusing my ex-partner’s cat for a few months. I was doing some awful stuff to her cat, always hitting her, shaking her, throwing her, choking her (mind you, she’s a baby cat, barely a few months old), anything really. I’d soak her in water, I was doing countless awful things to this poor baby.. it pains me to share this. 

The cat kept getting hurt, and we’d have to take her to the vet a number of times. I never told my partner a thing, I was scared of her judgment, and as such I allowed this to persist for months. I didn’t want to, the last thing I wanted to do was lie about something so awful, but when she eventually asked me (and she didn’t think I could be responsible for something so disposable, as I’m mostly balanced when it comes to my emotions; I’m a pacifist, really), I told myself I’d have to lie to her. And I did.. so this continued a bit longer. 

Anyways, sorry, I eventually couldn’t take lying to her anymore. I didn’t want to harm such a precious animal as this poor, baby cat— so I finally told my partner. She was heartbroken, and promptly, yet reasonably, told me to leave. It pained me, almost felt like betrayal as I was hoping she’d understand and help me get help, but of course I understand. It’s a lesson really. 

Since then, I told my parents, who kinda forced me into a psychiatric hospital at the start of this year (January). Now I’m waiting on this sort of mental health program I was in last year, I have Borderline Personality Disorder (specifically the Antisocial sort. Cluster B, I think) and I can’t wait to get my old therapist. I’ll be moving into this group home next week, which sort of sucks, but I’ll take whatever help I can get. This is not something I can keep ignoring, I’m 19, I need to deal with this now before it gets worse. This baby girl (the cat) isn’t the first animal I’ve abused either. 

I knew better than to hurt  the cat, yet I did anyway. And that kills me, I really do want to get better, I want some sort of atonement for what I’ve done. I’m blessed that my former partner loves me so much that she is supportive still, she also has wants for me to get better. 

I hope to maybe start going to an animal shelter, and helping animal rights activists or something if I can. I want to help others who suffer from mental health problems, I’ve always wanted to be an English teacher (sadly I dropped out of college, I was hating myself then and using too many drugs), and most importantly I want to help myself. I can’t do anything without helping me, I guess. I hope that’s not too selfish. 

I‘m sure that my abuse stems from self-hate, this constant sense of inadequacy, and wanting the cat to love me. I don’t know how related this is, but my mother died when I was 9 or 10 or so, which means she’s been gone for practically half of my life. And though I love my dad, we still have our issues. I’m working on self-love, I take it day by day. I’ve been, I told my former partner over 2 months ago, and I’m proud to say I haven’t harmed anyone (even myself) since then. I just really wanted to share this. 

I hope that’s ok.",3.3482528513306207,4.479125039184954,4.9256726472353805,83.92556693123461,72.90282131661442,7.749536450343496,25.32995397852332,8.197803283752503,1.473694950977123,2437,75,501,37,47,823,264,638,0.193,0.644,0.163,-0.9858,2,0,5,0,4,0,109.0,3,1,0,8,28,36,4,2,22,4,46,10,0,4,2,86,116,44,2,20,14,3,1,1,4,0,6,1,1,6,37,20,1,5,11,0,2,6,13,17,0,2,28,2,95,19,65,80,9,54,1,4,0,3,56,10,1,19,38,329,132,3,0.0,0.3276693687306722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04902940281480884,0.0,0.05538545561605762,0.0,0.0,0.04423177045626768,0.09204549951339287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05485313327402284,0.03867437328445317,0.0,0.09103162370595666,0.0,0.051707831947011534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047065144227362084,0.0,0.0,0.14675287302233345,0.06038471830252848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047645080546645166,0.0,0.05977097890902966,0.0,0.04416091720934165,0.0,0.0,0.07134136708436681,0.05702267566789309,0.0,0.0,0.057403545300719436,0.0,0.06339060135820465,0.0,0.0,0.05660182389537185,0.0,0.0,0.06414259628064453,0.0,0.0,0.062216844826916536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036532050050354585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053106734141340976,0.060589926714417326,0.0,0.04704706558950545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20228209870363711,0.0,0.031434220118441936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06093072890476371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921529504324633,0.0,0.11758490650320452,0.0,0.0,0.2595141394995504,0.0,0.05548092065832575,0.2197431447186706,0.0,0.0,0.11842202448173085,0.0,0.0,0.057729770462416785,0.0,0.04916249552399776,0.06119285061425876,0.0,0.03039719302768185,0.09017084593356044,0.0,0.058565811565534476,0.0,0.0,0.039067427381258686,0.027021906433228743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975960158540655,0.0,0.0,0.056076144868722526,0.055566810870431686,0.060249326975363164,0.0,0.0,0.11147990830253696,0.0,0.05584781702852148,0.0,0.1765931881096814,0.05878628639388145,0.040659566522434604,0.04101201969717231,0.04265885155714175,0.0,0.05882332240967481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607808797829415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770849968892645,0.0,0.061415741907540365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04829497725645609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052924659018030715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17716654730023976,0.05686838485180867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04723484726378027,0.0,0.04398511328182878,0.055375438949685114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540178572799302,0.0,0.0,0.09150680037558273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032283731403292,0.0,0.061915553441141365,0.07829808411348936,0.0,0.08834204071885116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331726608723175,0.0,0.06276567665398591,0.05212947233636397,0.0,0.16634638837656246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421972973000645,0.11023747461325184,0.07088144382179387,0.05434226526152015,0.0,0.03225198537932555,0.0,0.0,0.31710920052452546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11516031953302587,0.0,0.04777049556943375,0.0,0.0,0.35885909226035906,0.0,0.044366730361399605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331732845873785,0.0,0.040266687805377135,0.0,0.05636610389560705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123627071840725
mentalhealth,ThrowawayTheHecknDay,2020/02/15,"A bad day made me want to mix meds. This was a mistake. I'm constantly switching between exploding in anger, crying, and catatonia. I have these full body shivers, I'm kind of sweaty, my head is pounding, and I'm super tired and wide awake at the same time. 
  
  
I can't get any prescribed stuff. I just mixed a couple of mood-related OTC pills. I'm not going to die, but all of my senses are going crazy. 
  
  
The moments when I'm not shaking are the worst. I feel like a shaken soda can placed over an open flame. I might explode. My eyes already feel like they're ready to force their way out. This is the worst headache. I just know that I'm going to feel awful tomorrow.",1.7749604072398169,3.809549154411768,2.8929411764705897,92.95477375565613,79.51470588235293,5.6552036199095035,22.226244343891395,6.67199483983844,0.44255158371040704,519,16,111,5,13,166,94,136,0.205,0.679,0.11699999999999999,-0.9319,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,1,3,10,1,1,9,1,9,6,3,1,1,20,25,5,1,2,5,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,4,0,0,4,3,6,0,0,2,4,11,4,12,22,5,19,0,0,1,0,1,8,0,1,8,60,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20886304663241773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287094094851636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15803170821514942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21023519001001195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20453254864426124,0.0,0.0,0.2094225472030827,0.2079031077791836,0.12206284638352292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964313390189222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28710027805028976,0.2704276211012477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888524007596748,0.0,0.3226978011480262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19424459686215384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970945367376293,0.10401729192098097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18493454492109998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17909090298447858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21023519001001195,0.0,0.0,0.2007844977803376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19774581987871054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21666772139902035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103642752532258,0.2175368715102962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163575927479072,0.15023292148978387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Smirnoffff12345,2020/02/15,"Losing the will to live, but for some stupid reason keep holding on. I thought I'd do this relatively anonymously so that I don't drag loved ones down any further with me or look like an attention-seeker to my friends. It's a big fucking pity party and pretty damn pathetic but oh well! I guess I just need to get it out. If you're in a shitty place yourself maybe don't read it!
I'm not suicidal, I don't pose a 'risk' to myself. I'm safe.
I'm diagnosed with Bipolar I disorder with psychotic features - have been for the last three years.
I pretend to everyone that I feel okay and even happy when in reality a part of me withers and dies every single fucking stupid day I'm alive. I've been doing this to the point that my healthcare professionals were questioning if I was purely mixed and manic and wondering if my lows are just crashes from the highs (I make up excuses that it's all situational and hide it as best as I can). 
I'm never stable. I'm either in a manic or hypomanic trance (which in reality is just a 'delusion' that you're happy; that your life is okay - well until it becomes nasty and psychotic) or varying degrees of miserable/down. I can laugh, smile, joke - even pretend to myself that I'm happy - but the truth is that I want to break down in tears.
I hate myself. I put on this act of being confident and happy - when I look in the mirror, I want to cry most of the time. I'd love nothing more than to end it all. The truth is, I don't have the fucking balls and I care about my family too much. I'm praying for a physical illness like cancer or a heart attack that will put me out of my misery quicker than this. 3-6 months of pain is better than a lifetime of misery and suffering. If I could die and make it look like a tragic accident and I had the balls to follow through I would. I've attempted suicide a few times and failed. The amount of time I spend thinking about what I'm going to put in my suicide note is scary. 
Everything I aspire to is fucked up by a major episode. Or me. I'm a fuck up and there's no point having aspirations. I'll sit on my arse for the rest of my miserable excuse of a life on disability benefits. It's fucking shameful but there's no point trying. I've tried so many times. I give up! I'll happily drink, smoke and even drug myself to death. It numbs the pain and speeds up the process.
The meds don't help. Psychology doesn't help (load of shit for what is a chemical imbalance). All the meds do is keep you safe, sedated, quell the psychosis, looking 'well' and semi-'functioning' and out of hospital. I haven't taken to bed for years or self-harmed for over a year. I would love nothing more than to allow myself to feel shit but the meds tell me to keep holding on. I've held it in for so long that it's hitting crisis point now. I can't do it anymore. Nothing will make me feel better. I'm beyond help.
I was on aripiprazole, quetiapine, lithium and lamotrigine 2-3 months ago. Came off quetiapine first and aripiprazole a month ago. Sure, it's making me feel worse in some ways. I'm having nasty withdrawals - dissociating badly at points, feeling detached from reality - like it's a bad nightmare and my life isn't real, angry/irritable/argumentative, racing thoughts, wired/struggling to sleep or eat, strange visual disturbances etc. I'm getting to the point that I'm briefly terrified that people are trying my door when I hear noises outside. If I were speculating I'd say that it's possible that I'm entering a mixed episode, but the weird thing is that I don't appear majorly agitated, am coherent, aren't speaking fast or sounding majorly distressed all the time etc. It feels like it's all in my head and maybe I've just accepted reality? Coming off lithium and lamotrigine too. All they do is make you act normal whilst dying inside.
Anyone who says ""it will get better"" is deluded, full of shit or doesn't understand. Spare me the fucking optimism. Life's a piece of shit. The only two things that are certain is that you're born and then you fucking die.
I put on this persona of a happy go lucky person who doesn't let his mental illness get in the way. It's not true. It's a fucking act. I'm a phony. Sorry for being so depressing but I really needed to get this out.",2.943776631748591,4.817866244705883,4.540978243352137,83.24497743755039,75.37647058823529,7.622240128928282,25.996776792908946,8.436157345764494,1.8131551974214344,3348,122,664,63,73,1123,362,850,0.244,0.586,0.16899999999999998,-0.9981,1,0,3,0,0,4,105.0,0,4,1,8,25,72,18,5,48,2,58,34,7,7,13,117,132,56,8,13,28,0,6,5,1,6,13,5,2,1,51,33,2,8,14,7,1,14,18,36,3,4,12,15,64,36,95,109,26,93,1,8,4,12,25,46,14,22,34,415,115,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641783326149495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03314782293399187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048341287605009435,0.03408317611589616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05545372407835675,0.0,0.0,0.08139897623375975,0.0,0.0538342942379425,0.0,0.0,0.05115417788170981,0.12933122354550544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055750539688575684,0.04969810359883335,0.0,0.0,0.041988933069024285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038918389384490916,0.0,0.05354336898644072,0.031436066989387175,0.0,0.04198342889403705,0.049474479367092615,0.202355718063852,0.0,0.05586523702124948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047750896351933005,0.056527959470331325,0.0498776291878782,0.0,0.0,0.043173017439064064,0.0,0.10872564888821004,0.0965855311926801,0.0,0.04106920904791391,0.046577306071017004,0.043808270028706436,0.0,0.0459518259209126,0.0,0.14787961842382374,0.03482296646601466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04146191097730945,0.0,0.0,0.0376597564176436,0.405570214551317,0.12733452985041022,0.046760012869813634,0.055405063838145724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053697386350816716,0.0,0.0,0.2594462833534376,0.0,0.04812494449657838,0.050025755913467314,0.0,0.054938414174269166,0.057762277977078585,0.09801691149484258,0.051501071800773165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997862803751942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03973314318332248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049844390509912274,0.13771827644490306,0.11907011254933962,0.0,0.043042145542531225,0.043137207290527085,0.16373187718053625,0.05453244850156613,0.0,0.0,0.1319810107416463,0.0,0.1626861283565639,0.04941911036033484,0.09794048307730166,0.0,0.16243192042030108,0.0,0.049122830253938855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167218021919968,0.0,0.035832698732760564,0.07228662142376538,0.03759464025001824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04775910411270929,0.1403145275448664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03303042651600773,0.037072267319403385,0.10373482966945287,0.0,0.0,0.0527853704680414,0.0,0.03379318809483812,0.04256167781280354,0.050927460933088406,0.0,0.2764749430078885,0.05495191974196745,0.0,0.0495905180147111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960061012052258,0.05460481682760991,0.0,0.04875753123331197,0.05548173078125506,0.031226872580798683,0.05011730021000551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752691175812085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05085097770203869,0.0,0.2001414594644505,0.0,0.054790680830354224,0.048779542902184135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054565298233182194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050958168036085716,0.0,0.15995519035891084,0.0,0.04594096388843788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04260470193568351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476714755755297,0.0312334050684974,0.0,0.07739512284092115,0.1421160841684216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928262224945077,0.0,0.04761613766547137,0.050744577337272986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057501349689108174,0.07738197697152348,0.0,0.0,0.1314810477297483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052861157785466635,0.0,0.0,0.049674647134182764,0.06925316164339614,0.0,0.0,0.09416927106525938
mentalhealth,King_Jezzzebleluukyn,2020/02/15,"I collapse from overstimulation. Doctors have found nothing wrong with me, but clearly something is wrong. Anyone have insight into this? Preferably someone in the medical field. I got a myriad of mental issues, but most of them I can put my finger on what they are. 

No one's ever given me a diagnosis of what the hell this problem is though. When I am in a crowd of people, my brain constantly tries to pick up on and follow every conversation, something I understand is common in people with autism. What is far less common is that if the number of people and number of conversations becomes too high, I lose consciousness and collapse. By other people's accounts I am usually out 10-30 seconds before I recover, feeling very hazy and barely able to get my feet back under me.   


It started in 7th grade, it got way, way worse around the time I turned 30. I can't go to a crowded grocery store anymore, just walking into that kind of place makes me feel like I'm about to pass out so I just leave if there's too many people in a store now.   


I can't hold a job, I can't hold a fucking conversation. So far doctors have given me nothing to go on and the closest I can find to what I have is a muscle disorder, not a neurological one.",5.030888429752064,5.835306913223146,6.253378099173556,77.16824896694216,68.7107438016529,8.36404958677686,30.41425619834711,8.472884824447931,2.3376190082644626,971,37,179,14,16,327,137,242,0.135,0.797,0.068,-0.9647,1,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,1,14,8,2,0,14,0,18,8,3,2,2,35,35,13,0,4,7,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,11,12,0,2,8,0,3,6,5,6,0,3,5,3,25,2,33,30,2,38,1,1,0,1,7,20,2,3,11,129,36,4,0.11736722149322225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639674620807425,0.08206589019188558,0.0,0.0,0.1044817104249172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024814868206092,0.0,0.0,0.12962287506498374,0.09987086098640488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102063485705276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12683227096486072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451300405044353,0.2402606489466306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616537124085954,0.09888694611479514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868878735480065,0.08384716648583769,0.0,0.0,0.10727151415830956,0.0,0.0,0.12868710042376375,0.0,0.10850410504027287,0.061319529076783515,0.0,0.1334049934065578,0.0,0.1877385774557173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400491341519848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250088627747603,0.11646885727265413,0.0,0.0,0.122219900230545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242749410723585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057339695974238485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313038994783398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834353171813682,0.11899194108029144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823512799647574,0.11827855420006485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22523402886842994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15906213354274792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4068382673601956,0.0,0.12262376612070283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230458017952352,0.0,0.1179864746447848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09944486590017766,0.1807100422982517,0.0,0.0,0.0830731234586765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531269921115896,0.0,0.0684377706948911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968463920714088,0.12766183413855806,0.0,0.12218341675182212,0.0,0.0,0.12926341295862795,0.09684024942170197,0.0,0.18632127485367392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11960722566384326,0.0,0.2566452641754789,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GQWCIOA,2020/02/15,"Stuck in a loop... where do I start? I’ve been at this before so many times and it always results in the same loop:

New beginning -> take action -> think about all the things I have to do -> realize how many there are -> not knowing how to prioritize -> waste time trying to decide where to start -> get anxious about wasting time and having to decide on the action with the upmost priority now since time is becoming even more limited -> anxiety builds up -> it becomes more energy efficient to shut down and do nothing rather than taking action (behavioral shut down model) -> trying to numb the anxiety -> weed -> addiction -> depression

Right now, I’m at the “anxiety builds up” step. Earlier I wished I was smoking a joint (first time actually craving weed since I quit on 01/01) just so I could relax. I had a 20min meditation session. It helped. But now I just want to take a shower and go to bed and start over tomorrow. But I know I’ll just be repeating the same process and anxiety will build up even more. I’m stuck. Literally stuck in a logic loop. I feel like a broken machine and that I have no control over myself and my thoughts. 

What do I do?",4.652987616099072,6.183040201754388,5.373921568627452,80.42205882352941,70.2280701754386,9.048916408668733,27.88544891640868,9.478462496947786,2.4740260061919512,938,33,178,21,17,304,125,228,0.153,0.794,0.053,-0.9608,1,0,0,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,0,4,18,4,0,0,13,0,16,2,0,4,1,36,37,14,0,4,7,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,2,0,7,9,0,2,9,1,0,5,2,2,0,1,7,1,14,2,27,27,6,40,0,1,0,0,1,19,0,0,17,112,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.12484746493883225,0.13946955295714214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064533281026565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3914839631795897,0.14453170892673814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825913901779389,0.1088644478463658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14349154388152807,0.10214679987295362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019142819226097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16900156252429097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.064688484575566,0.09139778502766284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088226308932812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684148518607373,0.0,0.07270920068031643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575306773116832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406209920042758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625032595119381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594148450494807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356176599461904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275841995750833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607610241232326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092569809546948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21166061340324036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27166211325942885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28857673793109584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499525500070951,0.08197647506333035,0.0,0.10156720574778803,0.3730036992246278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17372082634399524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546019956132477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14712053858833307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_R3V3R3ND,2020/02/15,"Trying to leave. I am seeking information on electroshock therapy and how to induce long term amnesia. I would like to erase who I am. Any and all information would be appreciated. I don't want help. I want to be gone, mentally. Physically being gone throws stigma and problems on my kids. I just want to be gone, let something else take over. 

​

I am willing to take any steps. I will take them with or without help. I simply want to know how to do it properly. 

​

Thanks in advance.",1.9272995090016387,4.7526710425531915,3.4236170212765984,83.39576923076925,88.57446808510639,6.2965630114566284,25.31587561374795,7.61054688173877,1.8217505728314243,394,17,72,8,13,129,58,94,0.14,0.768,0.092,0.1017,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,14,0,0,3,1,21,26,6,0,7,3,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,4,0,0,6,2,1,0,0,3,0,11,2,14,14,2,12,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,3,49,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33013675439939794,0.3702376064119828,0.20720295379027326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12726672931268548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20423054251630945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372616352410805,0.0,0.0,0.16131393157231888,0.0,0.15578556944894864,0.0,0.07442925913262181,0.0,0.0,0.13482268181924506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535303773557442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577591593295974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728449495203527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3436389233911526,0.0,0.0,0.14026104539919798,0.17422256388462765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343390490075807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35943384656772714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685748638499546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21644648700461247,0.0,0.3702376064119828,0.0
mentalhealth,ktomato102,2020/02/15,"Advice for dissociation So basically my issue is that if I don’t smoke weed, I dissociate and forget what sanity feels like. The only time I can rationalize properly and feel any emotion besides apathy, excitement, or anxiety is if I’m smoking weed. But I can’t smoke weed because I’m on probation. I’ve done years of different types of therapy, been on countless meds, and I’ve tried grounding and all that shit, but the longer I go without weed the more detached from reality I am. I’ve been like this for as long as I can remember. What do you suggest, and does anyone have similar experiences? And yes I have severe PTSD.",4.822416666666669,6.430530408333336,6.720000000000002,70.63166666666667,69.91666666666666,10.666666666666668,32.5,10.746095033038511,3.995,499,23,89,16,9,174,79,120,0.10400000000000001,0.805,0.09,0.0927,1,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,3,1,13,1,1,0,1,17,18,14,0,2,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,2,10,3,10,15,2,7,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,3,5,55,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041232969746817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205125426558352,0.0,0.15979903082284086,0.0,0.0,0.14605960476677307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733641114210156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182438863786796,0.0,0.0,0.1827996197180332,0.21376532636819426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23497129994626534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20433290778881827,0.0,0.0,0.21124047190319575,0.14922989282270885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871607415283013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21802518673021976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041046118396288,0.0,0.0,0.18485963356737134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320278878688192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886901778366858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441793254440094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366298021531812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235984399688593,0.2144209093617077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388820551875635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218044880210562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14182149101611413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20136093388316126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451726120629914
mentalhealth,QandeelH,2020/02/15,I can’t feel love? I’m schizoaffective and I feel nothing but numbness even for my own mother. Please help me. I’ve never truly loved or been loved.,0.09600000000000007,2.3953966000000046,1.3033333333333346,96.40500000000002,99.66666666666666,3.733333333333334,16.0,5.6839178017228535,-0.5458000000000003,118,3,24,1,5,37,25,30,0.28300000000000003,0.44,0.27699999999999997,-0.3018,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,6,8,3,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,4,3,1,7,1,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,1,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909870543645304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29241535843473515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19381744836050133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7829329350577969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230175528130041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27745623976415784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174101845919351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IronMike7,2020/02/15,"Do I have mental health issues? I am male 26 and single. I find dating and relationships and even friendship hard to maintain. I spend a lot of time alone, I also work alone. I don’t have many friends to go out with nor do I care to leave the house much. 

I’m depressed, irritable and I have a hard time displaying emotions like being visually happy or excited. I usually wake up go to work, come home alone and play video games and go to bed. I am also very socially awkward and don’t know what to say sometimes.",2.6749406688241635,4.5624443689320415,4.110226537216828,85.97811218985979,76.18446601941747,7.2962243797195265,25.036677454153185,8.167268648758528,1.5131713052858684,402,14,82,7,9,133,66,103,0.19,0.655,0.155,0.0242,0,3,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,3,8,0,1,3,0,10,2,1,0,0,14,17,11,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,2,1,1,10,0,0,2,3,1,4,3,2,0,0,0,3,10,6,10,16,3,10,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,2,5,49,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4693684035765369,0.0,0.2416107089626888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15401921444812192,0.0,0.0,0.13012775173493146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13011069376598836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16992600378629902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977595765981684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380692200893556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671121591627985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575584516568829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608098090669172,0.2706462871485597,0.0,0.0,0.1605733408955431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152891729050494,0.0,0.0,0.17430689309672165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767095264102582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302049954291645,0.0,0.0,0.15995433946414572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380195166855122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842870919056626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315458750427033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15223638689017716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104898800415294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621855685471591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013168695490165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539901227357864,0.0,0.0,0.14940557527286838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617257850118287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16637500415019135,0.1246431339747928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21995192342245115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,123Neurosis,2020/02/15,"Looking for Work-Health Therapy programs An acquaintance of mine posted recently about a ""work-health program"" they just went through where they went to group therapy three times a week and a class on depression, anxiety, and stress management two times a week. This is EXACTLY the type of program I'm looking for but cannot find. I reached out to the acquaintance about a website or a phone number so I can look into the program for me, but they said went through their insurance and doesn't know how to get me in contact with anyone. If anyone can point me in the right direction, I could really use the help. 

Location: Los Angeles, CA (US)",6.166,7.314074933333334,6.091666666666669,78.10500000000003,66.33333333333334,10.666666666666666,35.0,10.686352973137794,3.95025,512,24,93,14,8,161,79,120,0.063,0.889,0.048,0.0904,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,4,0,6,2,0,1,12,0,6,0,0,2,1,17,17,9,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,2,0,2,4,4,12,0,18,12,0,17,1,1,3,0,10,8,0,2,5,62,13,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409669271611185,0.0,0.0,0.2085734532618862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190813737797184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284596939326926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631723297167267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792290988395309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170715892467778,0.0,0.0,0.09996978000244316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196703631911713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3757365831657495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099168606297566,0.0,0.14284115471442546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554709083741207,0.0,0.14726421229995296,0.0,0.0,0.12737032783495442,0.14187251107829071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084685443428166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34112412704611883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17393709047696354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456944949923368,0.0,0.17940492030732352,0.1288147212065328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23927271150211554,0.0,0.0,0.4147810026229876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21716091079779576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,smishmortion,2020/02/15,"Going to Mayo clinic in two months I've been suffering from mental illness for more than 15 years now and my life has gotten more and more difficult and I've really stopped functioning. Work is terribly difficult, I can't seem to make friends, I have a lot of trouble going out of the house etc. But what's most infuriating is that I've been addressed a bunch of times and gotten everything from anxiety/ major depression to antisocial personality disorder. Ive been to a few hospitals and a couple of residential programs but finally I wrote a long letter to my psychiatrist and explained how I've felt for so long and he agreed I needed a real definitive answer.

They only do ""consultations"" for 2 hours at Mayo but if there psychiatry or psych staff feel it necessary to do more testing they will. They ask you stay for 3 days from your consultation. I'm really excited to go get a consultation by one of the most prestigious hospitals and scared that they'll not find my case warrants further inquiry or that they'll just say I'm depressed and have no new answers. But at least I'm trying and I'm going through with it. Wish me luck",6.831679604798873,7.248867009174313,7.729816513761468,69.51147847565281,64.68807339449542,11.661820748059284,34.659139026111504,11.362043627235082,4.17069611856034,920,39,165,27,13,310,136,218,0.142,0.787,0.071,-0.89,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,5,1,5,11,0,1,9,0,15,3,0,2,0,39,35,19,0,3,9,0,2,0,1,3,3,1,1,1,6,12,0,1,7,0,0,4,3,8,0,2,7,3,16,3,27,25,12,21,0,3,0,0,18,5,0,8,11,107,22,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807406941343115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14429243270531264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707806267299347,0.0,0.09954023424995824,0.0,0.26587552114199003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689359109083058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17213630068552854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13871599975324622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804184422768982,0.0,0.1481961160185764,0.16907821492146646,0.1410692110786421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924713663684965,0.0,0.0806392792946852,0.0,0.3508729660707742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199946431763833,0.17809426227518346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901896142458084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731822476417097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312192295548302,0.0,0.0,0.10302698064168253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554420443717631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319729793372967,0.0,0.0,0.1144454112546718,0.0,0.14906807846125752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458866861078464,0.11738689112719765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476874766134045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17567924385781786,0.19775566788527785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12274192823937655,0.15452701258801058,0.0,0.0,0.14051056579922327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16451202356744454,0.0,0.12903995063313906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000024280128459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479062662850304,0.0,0.1507733616581047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748998497239968,0.0,0.0,0.11236553770765888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939359678961823
mentalhealth,aceofyeet,2020/02/15,"What is this So I don’t really know where to post this but I guess this subreddit may be okay.
 A few days ago this kinda weird thing happened to me and idk what it was. I was sitting in my room looking at memes when I gradually started getting more and more tense. Every tiny little sound that I could hear made me jump, and my eyes kept darting everywhere looking at random things. Every time I turned my head I kind of expected somebody to be there watching me. I imagined a really tall skinny black silhouette. I saw these scary faces flash over things (it wasn’t one of those times where something looks like a face and you see a face, it was something that didn’t look like a face at all and I just see a face. When I look back at it it was normal). The face thing had happened before but I guess it scared me more when everything else was happening. It was like I was super aware of everything that was happening around me.
I’m not super concerned about this but I just want to know what happened and if I should be worried or not. 
Also if you know a better subreddit for this kind of thing pls tell me.",2.625941704035874,4.61679252466368,3.3629843049327337,90.81102354260088,76.66816143497758,6.6124663677130044,22.809192825112106,7.554174236665415,0.8592799999999999,875,26,183,12,20,276,118,223,0.079,0.7929999999999999,0.129,0.9091,0,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,3,13,11,0,1,8,1,19,9,9,1,1,34,45,17,0,7,10,0,0,3,0,2,0,2,1,0,26,7,1,1,4,0,0,1,5,2,0,1,14,13,26,9,17,25,5,24,0,0,11,0,4,12,0,8,12,127,52,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143748617496857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249013178614069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918266092150053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931705413035565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777423806011536,0.0,0.0,0.09122902467866037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823579938767576,0.0,0.0,0.06652411504092251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616975282865548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738189951220982,0.0,0.185411641737329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05389234547254414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272657777580484,0.0,0.4560821812319065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586308848750436,0.0,0.11625911682682084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21483260507746585,0.1700679240001067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118368085629805,0.10338479471901782,0.0,0.0,0.43310595426510295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976043422376752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106646411327057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989805353651432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879052090112238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216284751108276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032725393886564,0.0,0.16439661047297327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15882196384288166,0.0,0.0,0.07301108694608953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015886414195723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34264601042853376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12029681366409135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219909501325033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084136420465613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047552467702121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,B4ggedMilk,2020/02/15,I need some help to support a friend I have a friend who has tried taking their life by ODing and I wanted to know if there are any key medications that they shouldn't have access to so that its less likely for them to OD or to OD on something severe,9.504716981132075,5.159871264150947,8.771415094339629,79.37523584905662,62.77358490566037,11.354716981132073,32.160377358490564,7.1686216300943375,1.8786301886792447,199,3,45,1,2,63,42,53,0.046,0.745,0.209,0.8481,0,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,3,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,0,0,8,10,4,2,4,2,0,0,1,2,1,2,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,8,9,2,1,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,3,1,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21052138630734665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4783532327192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075013707591908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013413846533934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21866173937556324,0.15124254290590944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118639036214416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22954568968087574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497312517668216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23832569968718784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3513016584457413,0.0,0.0,0.23276161920192845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21018087486272155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18259515677998064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GrafBismarck,2020/02/15,"Depression after a massive break up and due to a upcoming court date. This may be a bit of a long post but I have to get it off my chest.

​

About two years ago on Halloween my fiancee ending up leaving me after many years of being together and having a child. I found out she cheated on me a month before Halloween with someone she met at a club. I was getting making a snack late one night and her phone lit up with a DM on instagram talking about how nice her body was and other messages of that nature. She had told me that the weekend she went out my daughter was staying with her at her mothers because it was easier to visit her uncle that way due to a shorter drive. Turns out her mother watched my daughter while her and her sister went out to a club. Fast forward to Halloween and we had planned to go out as a family, just me my fiancee and my daughter. That day she decided she wanted to go out with friends and family somewhere else and through our plans out the window which caused a huge argument. I ended up not going with them because of the argument. She came back later that night and said she was leaving me, it was round three AM when she got home. She then told me that the next morning two people were moving into our apartment and I was being told to leave. I told her no as my name was also on the apartment so she had no right to throw me out.

​

I had been taking care of my daughter for most of that year due to her working nights and during the day. She didn't want our daughter to go to daycare at that time so I decided to watch her. In the end she ended up moving out to her mothers house as I was not going to be thrown out by someone who treated me that way. Fast forward a month or so after the break up I found out she was going to be moving in with her brother who is a drug dealer and here Illegally. I told her that I did not want my daughter to be in that environment so she could move back into the apartment and if she would give me a month to look for somewhere to live I would move out and she could keep the place. She agreed and everything was fine for about a week. She would sleep on the couch and we generally kept our distance from each other. After a week there was a night when I went out to make dinner and she told me I had an appointment to sign off the lease next week. She set it up for me and was basically once again trying to kick me out. We once again got into a huge argument and I told her it was not going to happen. She called the police on me because we were yelling (not even joking). They arrived and basically told her that I had a right to be upset because she came back after so long and was trying to force me out. She ended up moving out to her mothers again and found an apartment with her new boyfriend. 

​

At this time was I watching her for about five to six days a week until about late July-August. During this time I was unemployed and basically living off help from my girlfriend (now fiancee). It was enough to get food and pay for rent and take care of my daughters needs. At the beginning of August she told me she had lost her job and that she would start seeing her daughter more. I thought this was great as I would actually be able to look for work and she would be able to see her mother more. It ended up being a nightmare. A few weeks later she told me she had enrolled her in daycare. She didn't come to me to talk about where or when or any details what so ever regarding this. It made me really upset as I felt that as her father I should have a say in it. She told me I would also have to help pay for it. I asked her why I couldn't just watch her instead and she just told me it wasn't happening. I could not give her any money so she went to my father who loaned her money. It turned out she was getting assistance with it and used my fathers money to pay the other half. The real kicker was that my daughter didn't even end up going those two weeks that were paid for. This is when my depression really started. 

After this daycare even happened she ended up enrolling my daughter in school and moving with her boyfriend an hour away. Once again she did not tell me she was going to do this or even ask for my opinions on schools or anything. She has not kept me informed on anything going on at school and I now only get to see my daughter on the weekends. 

During this time of not seeing my daughter I have become incredibly depressed. I went through a period of drinking a lot, which I have stopped and just started taking sleeping pills because I did not want to even be awake anymore. It was all too much. My fiancee had basically been there to support me through all of it and I put her through a lot. 

My grandmother also passed away during this time and left me with a significant amount of inheritance. I have not received it yet as my family and I agreed we would all get the split of it when her house was sold which has taken quite a while to get on the market. 

I have still not been able to find employment but still have my apartment and my daughter is taken care of when she is here. 

My depression has only gotten worse due to not seeing her and not being able to find work. Now my ex is taking me to court for child support and there is no way I can afford it. I have basically begged her to not do this as it could end up ruining my life. She has no sympathy what so ever. Not once did she ever offer me any help when I had been watching her all those months. Nothing. Now she wants money from me. It has made me suicidal and worried that I will be ordered to pay for something I cannot afford. 

Maybe I am a bad father because of all of this like she has said. I have done my best for my daughter. It's just all too much for me. I have no motivation, don't even feel like waking up basically every day. It has all taken a huge toll on me and it upsets me so much that she would continue to beat me down this whole time with no sympathy what so ever. 

​

Sorry for the long post. I just had to get it off my chest. My court date is Thursday and I am very worried.",3.9925947398190047,4.756445471955132,4.810476621417799,86.72471945701359,71.04326923076924,7.347300150829562,26.46119909502262,7.331664511175081,1.1901538348416292,4791,147,1004,46,85,1552,369,1248,0.078,0.853,0.069,-0.4694,10,0,3,0,1,0,92.0,9,0,2,10,66,25,1,3,55,0,115,13,6,8,11,176,214,83,1,22,30,26,3,2,6,12,3,4,4,2,69,82,4,4,12,6,13,33,29,11,0,8,91,20,199,14,184,93,22,222,0,6,14,0,161,79,0,11,106,785,268,15,0.13424480088974775,0.0,0.032750890155763865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02974997903024287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051663907766547,0.0,0.14545418567715634,0.1631221269067298,0.06846830104155302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03328369245713929,0.0,0.0,0.055236016366962334,0.0,0.06275038355793659,0.0,0.06306370475226702,0.07741947408538971,0.02802220033346504,0.12275157691079555,0.03706570887609426,0.028558109490096937,0.0,0.035220409071937755,0.0,0.03664013836825169,0.03727892761612184,0.0,0.0,0.03426973779424318,0.07677014449742557,0.10265364109055326,0.03447659748652108,0.0,0.028910002279872813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718354991159627,0.0,0.0,0.08657679077860278,0.0,0.11562485029550608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03434476002738925,0.0,0.03287719933562085,0.03892033728214499,0.0,0.028036076306694174,0.0,0.26752735714587195,0.034677691304096384,0.0,0.1330011373422113,0.12143210806467272,0.0282767586700996,0.0,0.030162642721243527,0.0,0.09491553809815144,0.0,0.016969551233700867,0.02397612814475384,0.0322240153125499,0.0,0.06134865798180132,0.0,0.040582336526425455,0.11039437131813316,0.025929300039698074,0.0,0.14027473543013494,0.06438992276612318,0.19073603504573547,0.0,0.05368391538374,0.03700134172668167,0.0,0.0,0.08903417555740549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748609520808284,0.0,0.033664620236109125,0.0,0.03305102183013345,0.07745023808739247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03330431264262062,0.029830736801705112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571699134779122,0.10660939554239596,0.03646434224042428,0.0,0.02370526823971298,0.032792614373958064,0.0,0.05927030933220664,0.08910181826242795,0.05636591116516256,0.0,0.036636014576984136,0.057065064538477074,0.0,0.06351283825268579,0.04480472351093473,0.034025789386883463,0.03371673655534529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715291930008876,0.2496917116985388,0.07401403129404467,0.02488520471251309,0.0,0.03241361630790529,0.07138543436015392,0.12597965164281588,0.0,0.03220287676400368,0.0,0.0,0.14296633167124487,0.022741937841411902,0.05104961018953135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023267110485040068,0.0,0.03506431109510285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642847052809667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03373827588925049,0.0,0.03569646756635343,0.0,0.038199993334925804,0.04300032849227934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05732216322935716,0.06384877369811373,0.026689213464823745,0.0,0.1018971791162184,0.13371965697020766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671708754397301,0.0,0.05687259207651923,0.025837051583124115,0.0,0.037569015953086086,0.07126437076797128,0.03577177397733819,0.05360403570081563,0.02805866615702484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036710505840128985,0.07616970458841049,0.0,0.0,0.10093538329748188,0.05395044292625023,0.029333968264188943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0266438441541718,0.11741883445035498,0.0,0.0,0.3848299805541287,0.0,0.045571703871986786,0.07300989700152531,0.09835324795259223,0.0,0.0,0.02898610139762325,0.0,0.02769150499673505,0.09897632715953823,0.07991795577385677,0.16152462262829098,0.0,0.0,0.15555784420738006,0.03028376308998578,0.03746988150879463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329886042169878,0.06816605585062277,0.034201730240212364,0.2145682234812922,0.0,0.1631221269067298,0.06483693778823306
mentalhealth,mortyshane420,2020/02/15,"Teva sertraline? Idk if this is ok to post here, if not I'm sorry I'm still getting used to reddit. I just got a prescription yesterday for teva sertraline, 25mg for 2 weeks then an increase to 50. I've only been between two anxiety medications(clonazepam and ativan) since I was 13 and I kept trying to tell the psychiatrist it was making me aggressive but they didn't care. When I got my first appointment with a adult psychiatrist she actually listened to me and said alot of the pills they gave me couldve ended up damaging me more than helping me(I was on a handful of diffrent antidepressants and antipsychotics. My pharmacy always had problems with my psychiatrist actually filling out my prescriptions and sometimes I'd go a month or two without a pill that I was supposed to take every day....) and if the anxiety medications I had tried in the past didn't work I could try this. I just wanted to know if anyone had good results with this(I know everyone's diffrent but I'm just curious it would help to hear some people's experiences. I just used to hate the way my other medication made me feel.)

Tldr(first time doing a tldr so I hope it's ok lol)
I have anxiety about taking my anxiety medication, has anyone had good experiences with it?(I know everyone's diffrent)",4.477057893696898,6.799500365145232,5.87575577949022,73.37670816044263,72.3195020746888,9.569729302509383,30.14838964631496,9.957137785484203,3.4319933214779685,1032,45,180,30,21,347,144,241,0.107,0.7709999999999999,0.122,0.6766,3,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,2,2,9,10,2,0,13,3,17,6,1,5,0,41,43,16,0,9,13,0,2,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,7,11,0,1,4,0,0,3,4,4,0,3,17,5,25,6,25,24,4,20,0,1,0,0,11,4,0,8,11,115,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.21682249297371708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243870508654532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399449436054504,0.0,0.0,0.1553583393147151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326724387350134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869913301240129,0.0,0.0,0.0716461274831064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839588114867603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360107891583762,0.2123092312858571,0.0,0.21734155225264049,0.0,0.0,0.056172219833369966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889921764434712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05804177705655,0.0,0.06313700547046107,0.1863599413704748,0.1777032671590466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096818475950986,0.0,0.0,0.125210466912996,0.0,0.14892728446449016,0.0,0.0,0.11034092843661343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831622736537485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10511937126203744,0.07415578479268667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357450901570462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867378482523453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449162521986191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605133181195704,0.07701825623163185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063968795413554,0.0,0.0,0.10630149160224547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567537417073324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189770470093532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987432828514276,0.12436009614969022,0.0,0.0,0.08871942563107336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16705699701391274,0.0,0.0971006299004975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477952275116401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22627561561510445,0.0,0.21704444583256766,0.0,0.0,0.1918982579322518,0.0,0.0,0.06552583425381033,0.08818086226989323,0.0891125177268435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709018534214408,0.0,0.08087740299158584,0.0,0.0,0.07891764655842623,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sleepythesleeper,2020/02/15,My sister has been stalking my cousin for 8 years My sister is a stalker...She sends my cousin 10-15 unwanted emails and pictures everyday. Is there a way to seek help for stalkers? She’s diagnosed with depression and psychosis.,4.342142857142857,7.000710595238098,4.519285714285715,81.36321428571429,74.0,8.009523809523811,31.92857142857143,8.841846274778883,3.0891714285714285,183,9,31,4,4,57,32,42,0.136,0.799,0.065,-0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,4,4,2,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,4,3,0,4,0,1,0,0,8,0,0,0,2,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4765886014807452,0.5616257068964561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3708903250747726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4392133891416337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3563310761866453
mentalhealth,Sci_Senkra,2020/02/15,Fallout of coming out I recently got outed to my dad unwillingly by my asshole principal. And shortly before then mg dad states he believes in conversion tr therapy. We haven't tu talked about it but I'm not sure how to deal with it or how to talk about ir,3.6382692307692284,5.103433211538466,5.364615384615386,79.75538461538463,72.65384615384616,9.046153846153846,30.30769230769231,9.516144504307137,2.8886000000000003,205,9,40,5,4,70,44,52,0.048,0.9520000000000001,0.0,-0.3491,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,12,4,6,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,11,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,2,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665251851756793,0.352889078782792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698093063108519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32291368572418644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505088001985637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.309264682659521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29520396666462273,0.0,0.0,0.5035050305488533,0.0,0.0,0.35819172645809805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mountainsandthe-sea,2020/02/15,"Is there a way to cope with derealization/depersonalization/dissociation? I started to experience feeling like the outer world wasn’t “real” or just seemed strange and off when I was 14, after 2 times I smoked WAY too much marijuana and felt awful (it may also have been laced with coke). I was also being abused at this time and had been for several years.

When I was 15 I was diagnosed with CPTSD from years of childhood abuse. I stopped going to therapy because I couldn’t find a therapist I liked. When I was 17, I started experiencing these feelings again, feeling like the outer world wasn’t quite real or was off, but I also experienced it with people. My mom felt foreign to me at times, like I knew I knew her, but she just seemed foreign. Music I loved and had been listening to for a long time had the same feeling. People, places. I felt I was looking down at a foreign body or seeing a stranger in the mirror at times, not enough to send me into a panic attack but enough to be uncomfortable. I stopped experiencing this as much when I turned 18, though I went though another traumatic experience.

I am almost 19 now and 2 months ago I had an acute overdose (amphetamines this time. I know. Please do not call me an idiot, i already know I am and have heard it from every single person I’ve gone to to try to get help, except my boyfriend, doctors included, I’m not ever touching drugs again). When I had this overdose I was very sick for 5 days. I was fine for a few days after, and then I started having health issues that haven’t gone away since. But additionally, during those 5 days I was sick, I was experiencing some mild psychosis and dissociation. And since the OD, I’ve been experiencing derealization, depersonalization, dissociation more than before. It’s giving me a lot of anxiety because it’s so uncomfortable. (As a note I do think I have an anxiety disorder but wasn’t diagnosed with one, I was diagnosed with OCD when I was 9 though which has got MUCH better since then as I learned how to manage it)

I will probably see a psychologist at some point but until then, what can I do to calm myself during these episodes of derealization and depersonalization? Is there anything that will help? Anything I can do that will help over time?",6.53832167832168,7.021907226107228,7.320990675990673,71.96302447552448,65.31701631701632,9.956643356643358,31.65151515151515,9.851270322608157,2.9268536130536136,1796,65,334,36,26,599,200,429,0.129,0.769,0.102,-0.9359,0,0,2,0,2,0,51.0,0,0,0,2,23,11,2,1,18,1,48,11,1,1,1,62,80,40,1,1,15,1,8,4,0,4,8,2,0,1,18,18,1,2,16,0,0,5,8,3,0,1,35,18,48,8,47,38,12,62,0,0,3,1,13,18,0,10,41,240,66,3,0.0,0.18476615054498075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911672928647701,0.0,0.0780768543455931,0.0,0.08604311450471863,0.18706052668241324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175956023135257,0.11929544875599755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832724306184434,0.0,0.0,0.0887034513687244,0.07325647195807737,0.0,0.0,0.09506099149635104,0.0,0.06634771475146438,0.0,0.0,0.06895915521691635,0.0,0.08660838199295465,0.0,0.0,0.07961727258481092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15085484441821628,0.0,0.0,0.2374172599299612,0.0,0.0,0.08936170505545438,0.07980678670870141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904217919929886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113010363528185,0.0,0.0,0.07052937861956274,0.06569406560298878,0.0,0.0,0.15254151295391194,0.0,0.0,0.15769824611175598,0.11140522530346836,0.2245936248173502,0.0,0.07126422814460406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040736713228439865,0.07479704197571271,0.04431280736712663,0.0,0.06236065986540975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287969753226315,0.0,0.0,0.1567872759962882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138163403483573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570182139475295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15237108220994874,0.0,0.0,0.069002023446993,0.06547613729454699,0.0,0.0,0.06628829239529484,0.07037201656270098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913188808333335,0.06223583643530633,0.0,0.17195332336708408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0528352762748795,0.0,0.0,0.09148235704004913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081107704337052,0.06808140987437915,0.08146326742325946,0.08558891994609234,0.07370794919357143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406609863944621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293192686821922,0.0,0.17749650145240714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12426583994153438,0.14196403228286394,0.0,0.08808521777417913,0.0,0.19349564913078687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16556516618495196,0.0,0.0,0.1303747630170271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916681730363184,0.09053052698530772,0.0,0.04996077132093717,0.22981880797617804,0.0,0.3182592750688523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05293729982871006,0.08481023265862113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433437322590399,0.0,0.1237797559170292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228004695761077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042174197429166
mentalhealth,JustAGuy1721,2020/02/15,I wholeheartedly believe that I was born in the wrong generation I believe that I was supposed to live in Ancient Greece,5.2650000000000015,7.968772772727277,5.863636363636362,72.61545454545455,71.27272727272728,8.036363636363637,38.27272727272727,8.841846274778883,3.882381818181818,99,6,16,2,2,32,15,22,0.154,0.846,0.0,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,4,0,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,12,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8484941730994033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3325038269224996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4117023722281089,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cheizes,2020/02/15,Voluntary walk out states I need a list of of states that allow people to voluntarily walk out of the hospital if someone tries to commit them. I have literally nothing wrong with me and I'm tired of ending up in there. Does anyone have a list of states in the United States that allow you to leave if you're involuntary?,4.158571428571431,5.930388984126985,5.4319365079365065,78.56028571428574,71.85714285714286,8.214603174603175,23.711111111111112,8.841846274778883,1.6652120634920635,258,7,49,5,5,86,41,63,0.063,0.764,0.17300000000000001,0.7394,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,2,1,0,2,1,10,4,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,14,4,0,12,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,1,31,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356175028504042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2948850230612469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29845571096189377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568029447299592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498592439191212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32333213783966624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336128113525845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285513883050646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3872978456353321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287807475386208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36842417795029136,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,runningaway412,2020/02/15,"Very sweaty arm pits. I have very sweaty armpits. Even when I'm just sitting on the couch chilling. I can sweat enough to soak a shirt so it is noticeable 5 or 10 minutes after I put it on. I have tried antiperspirant, charcoal soaps and shaving. But nothing seems to cut it down. What can I do?",1.1453026634382582,3.610293796610169,1.8971428571428568,96.47322033898304,85.61016949152544,4.727360774818402,23.682808716707026,6.1826913282559595,0.3974774818401943,230,9,50,2,7,71,46,59,0.021,0.9440000000000001,0.035,0.1813,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,2,0,6,4,4,0,0,5,8,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,6,8,1,7,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,2,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3494227047063889,0.0,0.22335981910100786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3244857392474531,0.3850117571502991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33995687630911176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30785964268716315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22959700352294224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5580556380468523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OffTheWall343,2020/02/15,Needing some reassurance My mom came to visit me for the last time before she moves across the country. She surprised me and I wanted to spend more time with her especially because I’ve been feeling down. I called out of work for it and I feel so anxious and guilty about it.,3.158888888888889,5.414581555555557,3.699777777777779,87.77300000000002,76.03703703703705,5.801481481481483,25.61481481481481,6.742157984588678,0.9650192592592592,220,8,43,2,5,69,42,54,0.1,0.795,0.10400000000000001,-0.1974,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,11,6,4,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,9,2,10,4,2,9,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,3,30,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302909489722484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822391704852214,0.0,0.2487823748541039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29853890563154073,0.3343894117463414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956585944593044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23831773557928398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34241613487123457,0.0,0.3107393417785565,0.0,0.21678607014432769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34096253812237226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17244534855239874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128463087531896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frssian,2020/02/15,"sleepwalking/urinating CRINGE so im 18 and the most embarrassing thing in my life happened this morning so bear with me:
my roommate called the cops on me because she thinks i pissed myself next to her bed.

shes says she saw what she saw, im saying its water but ngl i dont remember any of this. i woke up on a wet floor with her asking if im okay
ive never sleepwalked let alone pissed myself?? WHAT THE FUCK????? WTF!! WTF LMAO AAAH im just as scared and confused as when i woke up because idk whats happening to me 

i dont know if im okay. everyones been asking for a while.
ive been really obsessed lately, such as with working out or (not) eating. i feel like if i stop moving ill die. i still smoke ungodly amounts of weed even though i haven't been able to even catch a buzz for a year. idk what im distracting myself from but i gave myself runners knee doing it. the other week my mom just stared at me and started tearing up saying ""this isnt you"" but i dont look any different i think ??

i know its temporary but i dont know if im okay. thinking about the 3 awkward months ahead makes me wanna turn myself inside out

last semester i got anxiety nausea/vomiting and now id pick that any day over this horror

i feel like a disgusting animal, and as someone obsessed with self control, im falling apart over this.
WTF IS GOING ON??? how do i fix this without having to spill my guts to a therapist",-0.3398908888180969,1.9318792431506893,1.9296049697355853,93.32326377827331,95.60958904109587,5.045046193055113,18.776999044281613,6.7210904114959815,0.32108958266963983,1097,35,234,17,43,368,163,292,0.24100000000000002,0.69,0.069,-0.9955,1,1,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,0,3,13,16,4,7,11,3,17,9,4,4,1,42,41,24,1,5,13,1,3,2,0,0,2,3,1,1,16,11,2,2,9,1,0,5,9,11,1,0,9,10,40,5,34,31,2,34,0,0,4,1,16,14,3,7,17,145,56,1,0.07895736396188996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177601676945373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610811451723941,0.0,0.060402167315036975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476289536874147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626335243082323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062429656760703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855739756419116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050920967775673384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194527803232622,0.08249364012190681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701497700782908,0.0,0.0,0.08079309506053589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430118846438724,0.0,0.0,0.07544714490908297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798464312449412,0.11281431318160295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299481068075471,0.0,0.0,0.0448732895127086,0.0,0.06314941685279038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396434723816008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6823000178441848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017870695999284,0.06436078992792675,0.08906734568971145,0.0,0.0,0.08073925417610907,0.05576992121294701,0.07714915948254791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06630429980772805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052704653558540766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924739103903094,0.06302301461718847,0.08391918230482877,0.0,0.0,0.060896786654497825,0.0,0.08397205232523426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050582109172840464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894433015505973,0.0,0.0,0.18837019481709524,0.07905009554936289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236975057347898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669003182585787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055886428603547735,0.0,0.06305545285335026,0.0660118917488615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167558519804994,0.05245576418344327,0.15177807200446938,0.0775752092041235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588293881271311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06333483473545272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761120812591583,0.0,0.057481901341922076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05084595367259293
mentalhealth,sierra2210,2020/02/15,How to stop projecting your parents’ behavior onto yourself? In my case it’s my father who thinks I’m never enough. I’m still a minor and I’m still in contact with him. How do I stop having the same expectations for myself?,0.4149523809523821,2.854807511111112,2.912698412698415,85.63000000000002,96.11111111111113,5.238095238095238,19.761904761904766,6.868970318607317,0.8211904761904769,178,6,33,3,7,61,35,45,0.114,0.8859999999999999,0.0,-0.5803,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,1,10,6,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,6,6,2,8,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,5,26,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35126162136237016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621921864447309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.377476820520909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.542972723493004,0.5684307228617468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21782771987076802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vegansprout,2020/02/16,"I'm posting this because I need to be really honest with myself right now. Two weeks ago I lost my job. Every day since then I have been getting high every day and binge eating on so much food that I really can't afford every day, and isolating from everyone. I am so disappointed in myself. It stops right now. I want to turn this around and I don't know what to do except stop smoking and stop binge eating and see where it goes. 

Has anyone ever been in a similar situation? Did you turn it around?",3.2561633663366334,4.792889603960397,4.8723638613861375,82.61666460396042,73.75247524752477,7.822277227722773,21.53589108910891,8.472884824447931,1.2073851485148517,394,9,78,7,8,133,67,101,0.126,0.826,0.049,-0.7756,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,8,3,0,0,1,0,10,3,0,0,1,16,19,8,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,8,3,3,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,1,11,1,11,14,1,22,0,2,1,0,1,9,0,0,12,54,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752815203516704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059415519935444,0.0,0.0,0.2561417263470409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08769911931099066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27834418284564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944207989560686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13013464919991904,0.3636388558536155,0.13746972229769625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396282455268838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516382519312756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200187893415915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276438453275053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079064757703018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704626992128964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575775113440457,0.10667450107368084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13778345289374985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18432794268362068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457208302522438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11464223707083272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900709044557525,0.16171093422119087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3608341881457636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3129688674878503,0.1405357624543763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485564366316115,0.0,0.11540028656279873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kytesky,2020/02/16,"Found the words to describe how I feel, but what do I do? I'm burnt out. I qualified as a dentist in 2012. I had a great 4 years of working various 1 year hospital jobs as a young dentist.

Then I went to medical school, which I funded by working nights as a dentist for the last 4 years. I also renovated a home I purchased, and I'm planning a fairly casual wedding.

Thing is, I'm scared of going to full-time work as a doctor. I don't think I have the energy or motivation for more exams/hoop jumping to get jobs as time goes by. I've almost come to the realisation that I just want to do the easiest thing, as little as possible, because I feel lazy now. I'm burnt out. I worked too hard over the last 4 years.

Now what? Does taking a break actually work? I've had 2 weeks off (reading weeks) and I've just been working on the house. It hasn't made me feel any better...maybe the next 3 years will be joyous like the ones I had between my 2 degrees, but I've got a bad feeling they're gonna be horrific.",2.0604805302402656,3.342013694835682,4.309616128141396,86.48102734051369,76.37089201877934,7.453079259872964,25.205468102734052,8.124751697461798,1.3890725766362886,779,27,173,13,17,271,124,213,0.096,0.757,0.147,0.8552,2,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,8,7,5,0,1,18,0,14,5,0,3,0,22,33,15,0,1,5,0,5,1,0,2,5,0,1,0,7,5,0,0,7,2,2,4,2,2,0,1,8,5,16,3,26,21,2,28,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,2,17,97,23,13,0.0,0.0,0.11485783772620745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785915439541697,0.0,0.0,0.0941243329210148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003976861919282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827425524389798,0.0717485877706998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409573733226113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138778930079044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047053477422602,0.10299971895040637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380498304158559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905154360120827,0.0,0.0,0.06149318660688991,0.0,0.06689139885246073,0.0,0.09413512750840296,0.12976423185698382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543572900711752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806230211770065,0.0,0.0,0.13580954343209325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233597396522414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19188177716764496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575020825765144,0.11796592666783125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113702136775968,0.0,0.0,0.11824507479072555,0.0,0.0,0.11856997108168553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517486695411867,0.11045310765887796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975629956148475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13268862181646304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773145784350875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783783912743925,0.1191182856203901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849545631032582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563887774758116,0.07541715544487496,0.0,0.0,0.0686315871576689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942227749877243,0.0,0.1888230498610544,0.0,0.0,0.10910871455422397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5141202926571293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37897343877407397
mentalhealth,Edgelord_Dei,2020/02/16,"I can't feel negative emotions Hello, I'm 15 years old and I can't feel negative emotions. I can't feel fear, shame, sadness, loneliness, anger and so on. I tried searching for something like this online, but nothing came up. So I hope someone here knows what is causing this. I'm sorry if this breaks the rules.",1.9215690866510573,4.516120360655737,2.8970960187353647,89.81295081967217,83.09836065573771,5.4529274004683845,26.747072599531606,6.868970318607317,1.3530121779859483,246,11,47,3,7,78,42,61,0.12300000000000001,0.6579999999999999,0.21899999999999997,0.7165,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,2,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,11,12,6,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,3,5,2,3,11,0,6,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26972871250398794,0.0,0.2422641851838485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5305579863723103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653763004072404,0.3577308785336535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23423415456335325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12960697033900512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11521548790394798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22628693863590635,0.0,0.24746576586710786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19981948891705495,0.18155481415431984,0.0,0.2639943527371505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16011428781948173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186792441088193
mentalhealth,Ethan_Brennan6366,2020/02/16,"Any tips on pushing past an emotionally taxing parent to improve yourself? My father has been emotionally and when my parents were still together physically abusive to me (I’m now 16M) due to me being his youngest child. He is not only a drug addict and alcoholic who chose those over his 5 children, but is also a compulsive liar. In the 3 years and 3 months it has been since my parents split up he has lied and claimed to: 
-Have cancer
-Have Parkinson’s
-Have Emphysema(did not have at the time but now does)
-Been sober for months yet called me drunk every day the week before.

In the past 4 months he has spent 3 weeks in hospital, each time due to either drinking himself stupid, nearly overdosing or not using his nebuliser properly and claiming he can’t breathe - all of which he blames on me. I’ve suffered from mental health issues for a long time because of it and truly believe it is my fault because of that.

Last week alone; he was in hospital due to not being able to operate his nebuliser and when I went to see him at my brothers request, his only response was ‘Oh great, the autistic one’ which greatly boosted my mental state over that condition as I’m sure you can tell.

And a few months back, in October, he tried to murder me by burning down the flat he and I were staying in whilst I was asleep. But due to him having passed out from alcohol after, he got a slap on the wrist.

Those are just a few things he’s done that affect me... can anyone give some tips on how to put this behind me? Thank you",4.647486417385746,5.81116972818792,5.268446788111216,82.56522371364655,69.83892617449665,7.958069670821349,28.62000639181847,8.269060116576782,1.9162717801214442,1201,43,233,17,21,387,175,298,0.138,0.7909999999999999,0.071,-0.9772,3,1,4,0,0,0,32.0,0,2,0,0,11,9,3,0,14,0,27,11,3,3,2,27,36,18,1,0,10,5,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,2,13,11,4,0,0,2,2,4,5,5,0,1,12,1,26,4,40,22,6,53,0,1,1,0,32,18,0,2,29,154,39,1,0.10753370961592194,0.12740986185254438,0.0,0.11722761605304327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22984166498011235,0.0,0.11137249269210166,0.0,0.08599466872899357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312661002685353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751900700467377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826867850348806,0.0,0.1311031025801171,0.0,0.09150326665119488,0.1211536667833929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980394050735606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935034666043215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941034739417746,0.11004431984362524,0.0,0.10534209691278798,0.12470496346116733,0.0,0.0,0.2419218993525836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060178824228003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031561328413832,0.0,0.0,0.08600453097117583,0.23711258895779544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430330481876427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223725470416712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876543256700102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516394912159122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167373741888463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.343329524335986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286762463002759,0.16356846363489402,0.0,0.0,0.3582103763157813,0.0,0.20530618704252834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810107917389274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569044412757232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895299581698432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146166266352367,0.08587655940623072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134924870382683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398920194442667,0.09900259220481668,0.0,0.0,0.07144061845968253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18811131252068866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300833013112633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287459893957743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25877116656155746,0.0,0.0,0.09968482614809536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924818336149469
mentalhealth,speccypenguin,2020/02/16,"How do I make it stop? For almost a month now I've had increased anxiety and paranoia. At times it's all consuming and seriously affects my mood to the point I get angry/upset or annoyed at trivial things for extended periods of time. 

As a result of previous circumstances I already have decreased self-confidence and self-esteem. I find it hard to trust people and don't think myself to be a priority to others. My issues are by no means as bad as they could be but recently it is affecting me more than usual.

In the past counselling has opened boxes without closing them or offering strategies, explanations or reasons to close them. So I am dubious to engage again.

I just want to feel at peace, does anyone have any recommendations to ease these feelings?",5.936267605633803,7.415506992957753,6.817014084507044,71.47974647887324,67.09859154929578,9.905352112676056,33.91830985915493,10.125756701596842,3.774873802816901,611,28,101,15,10,203,106,142,0.122,0.7659999999999999,0.11199999999999999,0.6419,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,3,0,5,6,1,0,5,0,12,0,0,6,1,30,19,13,0,2,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,3,13,2,22,15,3,19,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,5,10,75,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955509198956258,0.0,0.21550317738988284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280131239703538,0.0,0.14939340819456015,0.0,0.0,0.13654865141109335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16305581958043527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592013982128602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708962693060532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19748514045264734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784880485533502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202897916564636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17493807674908532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20382805546544852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035505467473207,0.0,0.0,0.21272392150745026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15587558140506444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18642277464022167,0.13538686199727226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18460858072769545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007867380895121,0.1928215626312412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4074521931018335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16326800722724608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973947358448246,0.1251315114113035,0.0,0.0,0.2277459069076921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21508015906517453,0.0,0.11518486023230999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18824892763833448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PapaSand,2020/02/16,"Is it bad that I get a rush out of looking at gore? I get kind of excited in a really weird and odd way when I see gore. I don’t have thoughts about hurting other people, but when I watch certain videos like running the gauntlet, it kind of gives me a rush. I wonder if it’s bad that it happens to me, and if I should stop or if I’m a psychopath or if I need help.",4.845487804878047,2.7617485487804885,6.2196341463414635,86.98359756097562,69.60975609756098,9.175609756097561,31.47560975609756,7.1686216300943375,1.6566243902439028,279,9,70,2,4,96,53,82,0.18,0.687,0.133,-0.4451,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,9,0,0,5,0,4,0,0,0,1,16,14,11,0,6,7,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,2,1,0,3,1,4,0,0,1,3,10,5,8,12,0,10,0,1,3,0,2,3,0,7,4,45,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3972546990904594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485743319143629,0.2282047723637056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21036442653163775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15945195907558482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546650576805873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4954495004096568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162205322966634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997668171344079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763916536216459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649222556481549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15239776278017098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18956670589761196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988858271021836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888572661340655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888251879763694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579804353967967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sbubbygay,2020/02/16,"Need help finding the cause and cure of my brain fog So I've been smoking weed for 3 1/2ish years, been having seizures for about 2 to 2 1/2 years, ages I've basically had a foggy mind, can't retain info, I can barely feel my emotions, and I basically feel more disabled than I already am. On October 27th 2019 I drank too much and got alcohol poisoning, which lead to me throwing up the next 3 days and became low on magnesium so I had a night seizure (probably another grand mal) and fell off my bed into my shoulder which pops out and in at certain angles and it huuuuuuuurts. After the alcohol poisoning, it was Halloween when I felt okay again, but I didn't just feel okay... The brain fog was completely cured and I felt my emotions so vividly I could've sobbed at anything. While I was recovering I didn't smoke about weed, and the brain fog was gone. But when I took a break that was a week long, I felt literally no difference in my clarity, and I'm just so desperate to feel and be connected again, no anxiety or stuttering. Thank you for any help you can provide!",7.0241466552315615,6.155675797169818,7.678250428816469,74.3401629502573,64.61320754716982,11.482675814751287,35.78216123499142,10.832165505486646,3.6919754716981146,847,35,170,20,11,283,125,212,0.121,0.797,0.08199999999999999,-0.8509,1,0,3,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,0,1,13,10,2,0,9,2,17,9,4,2,1,33,31,21,0,1,5,0,7,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,5,13,3,1,9,0,0,5,5,5,0,0,18,8,22,5,21,12,2,31,0,2,1,0,4,11,1,1,14,104,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874273919036493,0.0,0.0,0.14839735048305447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144813148039303,0.14100956462154865,0.10287359204731128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066209640823896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4503582821933788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13814365357322966,0.0,0.0,0.14099528095511948,0.0,0.0,0.10736795585415113,0.0,0.0,0.08672574343710372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404985525790244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025342710657223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27197994904665923,0.0,0.3873534686665971,0.0,0.1229084128550368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755255375947903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802725411264885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900682020223492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578218778482645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09885516015745724,0.0997120757130492,0.0,0.0,0.14301650153091594,0.12619639569004218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449876190018294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380721690122312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940752277291364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078683471236442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17319596722711114
mentalhealth,MiniLemons,2020/02/16,"Getting ready for my first interview ever My head keeps telling me I'm not worth it.
And I'm nervous and panicking.
Need some words of wisdom",2.4130952380952384,4.968523642857143,3.2214285714285715,88.59023809523809,80.42857142857143,6.590476190476192,27.190476190476193,7.793537801064563,1.8144619047619053,114,5,22,2,3,36,24,28,0.19899999999999998,0.626,0.17600000000000002,0.0603,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,8,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,2,5,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,12,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4056768160381816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3814777805051164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23431285574647254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.460270978450656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39863059346194013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33254304072046736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3919922345692437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,egehoved,2020/02/16,"Am I in danger of developing something? Ever since I was little I’ve had auditory hallucinations. They stopped around when I turned 8 but they are beginning to make appearances again now (I’m 17) it’s mostly my fathers voice shouting my name from far away. Until now I thought it was normal, but when I talked about it with friends they said they didn’t recall anything like that. Is this just a mental glitch? Or should I talk to someone about it?

On a side note I often get deja vu.",1.9264976076554987,4.54027709473684,3.1802870813397126,87.64382775119617,83.31578947368422,5.559808612440191,22.320574162679424,6.980632752743323,0.7806842105263159,384,13,75,5,11,124,73,95,0.040999999999999995,0.8690000000000001,0.09,0.7423,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,4,0,11,3,1,0,2,0,8,0,0,1,1,16,16,6,0,2,4,1,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,6,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,6,3,13,2,12,9,1,17,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,4,10,53,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076782837053993,0.22466202344570294,0.0,0.0,0.2371090970797884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282823187506661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19497975719869892,0.0,0.13185244980295047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232948050806573,0.252940159433631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684583482419878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543287165643649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24726815597672697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400608264402237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20876234516873815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21383153763045995,0.19428607932705536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109918858681138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.405689480487998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003528925218485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745051345131719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mangosparklingwater,2020/02/16,What What is goin on I can’t feel anything I can’t understand anything. I’m trying to go to the dissociation sub but nothing shows up maybe it’s not real. Nothing triggered me. Why. My blade isn’t sharp and I can’t cut myself right. I’ll slice my neck open if it will make this stop. Why,0.2432488479262673,2.386538209677422,2.328801843317972,94.14177419354841,86.25806451612901,4.833179723502305,20.147465437788018,6.1826913282559595,-0.04811797235023052,227,7,52,2,7,76,45,62,0.106,0.894,0.0,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,6,1,1,2,0,11,11,3,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,2,1,0,1,5,1,0,0,0,2,7,0,4,10,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,27,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4120958541413486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266036577219574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14230122743739276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16713588360663506,0.0,0.2515483241464245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4805079322776114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849962744772754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21382991905405244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20933551614634646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699969645442752,0.0,0.0,0.26066265935475985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4518723122345346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sea_crystal,2020/02/16,"I'm sick of everything vent

I hate my life. Nothing ever changes. I keep sitting in this cramped fucking room every single day. I want to end it all. I'm tired of living. I'm sick of this body. I'm sick of everything and everyone. Nothing i did helped me. I don't think i'll ever be happy again. I just want to find something that makes me happy. I don't know why i even hope. I don't have any friends. Barely ever did. I have my sisters, but they don't understand me. Nobody i met understands me. I don't even understand myself. I just feel like i wasn't supposed to be a person. I don't know how to live a human life. I feel like i was supposed to be a shark, or a leaf or something like that",-0.8182000000000009,1.304091913333334,1.8096666666666683,95.4465,93.2,4.6000000000000005,19.5,6.2581,0.04980000000000029,537,18,122,6,20,184,75,150,0.09300000000000001,0.767,0.139,0.733,0,0,2,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,1,0,9,9,2,0,4,0,15,9,1,2,4,25,35,5,0,3,5,1,2,3,1,0,7,0,1,2,5,1,0,1,9,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,5,2,25,7,10,27,2,9,0,0,0,1,7,2,1,3,9,74,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743838733500613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282270464198665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601993464958564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292306276586647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388316598574427,0.0,0.0,0.16985093519213798,0.34892223059833005,0.10833367293606998,0.12286310740131205,0.23111771116156846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002719545557856,0.18371426902289406,0.0,0.0,0.11751922358581762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934010976060656,0.11886956458346135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737502811169227,0.0,0.12694551753057595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618404784062395,0.0,0.0,0.1277083361770073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428726049620187,0.0,0.0,0.14132772882581732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816388367778808,0.18845217030109446,0.0,0.2270758958241077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085827734349857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467507651533707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122705547702008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19797337654533076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238847467022882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477830821137852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4015670064248152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167889898573172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602289088858965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,taytaykosho2003,2020/02/16,"Am I a psychopath? I’ve always loved animals as I’ve consider converting to vegetarianism. lHowever, I don’t understand why I like to see cute ducklings suffer as much pain like being grind alive or boil(basically as much pain as possible) and always have an urge to torture them as much as possible. This just happened all of the sudden even though I’ve had GREAT sympathy for animal before. Am I turning into a psychopath or is this extreme case of cute aggression?",6.493527131782948,8.047333779069769,7.5627906976744175,66.37038759689926,65.86046511627907,11.314728682170546,35.26356589147287,11.20814326018867,4.654789147286822,379,18,60,12,6,128,58,86,0.155,0.603,0.24100000000000002,0.8399,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,3,11,2,0,4,0,7,3,0,0,1,7,12,10,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,5,6,13,10,4,2,0,1,1,1,2,1,0,2,3,41,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211363473058273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16420497017779584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745619476004394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21275232581047054,0.0,0.0,0.1706445139780479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18855275651894926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741647760486676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255699000520849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4106716551790875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4350939006235737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537737103542669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18959402320229374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20989813705939947,0.0,0.2008906712708253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741272270416549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kidonthemountainn,2020/02/16,"Suspecting I have aspergers- would it be worth it to get diagnosed?  It has been suggested to me by three different counselors/therapists that I have aspergers/autism. I went to a psychiatrist years ago and did some psychological tests but she ruled it out before I finished all of them saying that my IQ was too high for me to have it (???)

My questions are 1) Is there any real point in getting diagnosed?

and 2) Are you diagnosed / is someone you know diagnosed and how did that help or hurt them?",3.1235483870967755,5.864880333333337,4.4047419354838695,80.04711290322581,79.0,8.881290322580645,27.57956989247312,9.3871,2.9808202150537633,393,17,73,12,10,129,67,93,0.073,0.875,0.053,-0.4423,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,14,4,0,1,1,14,18,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,8,4,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,5,1,13,0,9,11,2,8,0,1,0,0,9,4,0,3,3,56,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15775681866208335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102351781528894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15143662775631764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7225301700215662,0.0,0.1859374139833086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18596060166653894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192873858625899,0.18803168138670728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905171261449521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978058918322366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16823613754476888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19936353091110848,0.0,0.0,0.20256516535035307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415263319857695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507906809940504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20663315634928828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16497699440487926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642249927852675,0.0,0.0,0.11460477587636987
mentalhealth,UnsoldNut,2020/02/16,Best ways to get out of your head/ reduce anxiety? I've really been struggling with anxiety recently. I've had it bad in the past but recently ive got it alot worse from seemingly no where and get sick to my stomach from it. I've started to get anxiety attacks where I just suddenly feel shit and get stuck in my head thinking shit thoughts about everything. I've found the only real way I can stop my anxiety temporarily is working out or talking to people and I can't do either as often as I need my anxiety to subside. Anyone got any ways they release this kind of anxiety?,4.67941304347826,5.762612713043481,6.2284239130434775,76.01133152173915,69.69565217391305,10.271739130434783,33.50543478260869,10.411451182825502,3.751717391304348,462,22,86,13,8,158,74,115,0.336,0.645,0.019,-0.9908,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,2,5,7,3,1,3,0,7,6,5,0,0,20,21,7,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,7,1,11,2,17,14,3,15,0,0,0,0,3,6,2,4,6,53,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501157446582136,0.0,0.573797138726991,0.0,0.0,0.0874104000790039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14221773789735342,0.0,0.0,0.104378727123612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119103510624272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235157184169543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320917474554341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13706779889606766,0.0,0.0,0.2612517603464801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999649809110328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565941227884183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017942474989702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269386276568096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507628359533908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119336874782316,0.08666669095833365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14228956445180685,0.0800850664921056,0.0,0.24686600357132804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380506182409048,0.0,0.0,0.2566434094154751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848322902921961,0.0,0.0,0.1045145571512826,0.0,0.1306883443074989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047887912770392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010181984165597,0.0,0.09924454558877448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976830655240984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100929095958404,0.0,0.12739660074570172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DeepLove5,2020/02/16,"I'm a minor living in the US, California. How can I get diagnosed/screened? I've read so many articles and I'm so so confused because I'm dumb. I was gonna lie to my mom about something hurting me to get a check-up and then ask about it. Will they give me those quizzes? If I get medication will they tell my mom? I can't have that she's very abusive and I'm scared.",-0.2996296296296315,1.6726758271604965,2.1965432098765447,95.34444444444449,87.02469135802471,5.575308641975309,22.58024691358025,6.937597516519254,0.5207876543209875,286,11,70,4,9,98,56,81,0.22399999999999998,0.7759999999999999,0.0,-0.9536,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,2,0,6,4,1,2,3,0,6,1,0,1,0,6,16,9,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,12,0,5,12,0,2,0,1,0,0,9,1,1,2,1,38,15,1,0.0,0.25874527159035426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041563584705242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312277162143804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3422845114292191,0.209490546651286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23378092225635005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19283404869569745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22140362692436616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199954545713532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.511529380308128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21843967194516267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186370524345284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681200357908748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19087424811602746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626849433063248,0.0,0.0,0.1801868450885897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NordischAlise,2020/02/16,"I get more and more into bad habits and obsessive daydreaming Im having a lot of trouble to start new habits in my daily life and thought a habittracker might work for me. But that´s not the case. I got better to do a few things more often than before like reading. It´s not really helping with ""new"" habits that I normally wouldn´t do. I struggled with a lot of perfectionism for like the last five years since im 17 and started to get to work. This all or nothing mentality. And everytime I wasn´t able to do it perfect I gave up and wasn´t trying until I start all over to do it perfect. That really got me in a lot of bad habits. I became a really messy person and never make any progress with hobbys and stuff like that. I know that I feel good if a do sports or pratice guitar but i struggle so much to do it even slight regular like twice in a month. Because when I go home after work the first thing I do is start the TV. I don´t even watch it, I feel like I need something in the background so I don´t get into bad thoughts. While the Tv is in background I´m on the laptop on the same time. Scrolling total aimless through the Internet.

Or I can spend my time with hours of daydreaming. Its kind a obsession for me.I´m having a complete set of characters in my mind, its like book characters in my [mind.Th](https://mind.Th) story can change from one hour or day completly, sometime I go back to a story I had before. The characters itself stay the same, I got a few more than years ago and I often change their backstory. If I watch movies or anything character based like books or tv series it has huge influence about this daydreaming. I often hate if, because it changes my characters or the story.It often get intense when i listen to music, so I listen to it all the time. Even if I just go downstairs to get something for like 2min. But I don´t need to listen to music to get there. So if I go to work and kind of have to interrupt it ´s really horrible and I need some time to get into work. If its not a busy day at work and i´m not 100% concentrated at something I have these thought. Even if I talk to a costumer its sometimes only for one sentence in my mind of that world until then I go back to reallity. Its like my life is in the way for these thoughts. I´m kind of a sensitive person that always repress my bad feelings until they got back out of nowhere.  And don´t get me wrong I thing its really helpful for my life in general. So I rather life in that daydreaming then thinking about personal bad stuff. So I don´t want to get rid of it complete, but I feel like I don´t have any control over it. Is that normal or from why is it happening?  I don´t think that it´s healthy and I don´t remember when it started but like a long time ago. I´m 22 now. I had a time when I tried to write it down, the characters and the story but I gave up after a few days because it was so chaotic. I was like 16 back then and so I know that those characters changed since then. But they in general didn´t change in the past years. 

 So when I look back at what I did in my freetime or on the weekend it was totally unproductive and I didn´t really do anything. It´s really embarrassing and its horrible for my mental health that is already really messy. I moved to my first own apartment two months ago so I thought it would help me to start all over, out of the environment before. But I now see that I always go back to bad habits. Like 90% of the stuff I do is the bad habits. I made little changes like doing laundry regular and stuff like that. But I already see my apartment get more chaotic every day and sometimes I can get myself to do little talks, but I really need to force myself and its not enough.Thought about placing Notes as a physical reminder so I read them everyday but im really insecure what is helping. Kind of weird to ask but I really need help with the situation I´m in and I feel like I lose control over my life. 

Sorry for all the mistakes, english isn´t my first language. So I just want to ask for any advise that can help me.",2.7622341657305824,4.657683561963194,3.987864857858813,86.91670439816818,75.95705521472392,7.290935798842133,25.09850514127711,8.15712126957752,1.508586624038711,3193,111,650,55,71,1043,275,815,0.125,0.76,0.115,-0.9521,0,0,3,0,0,0,72.0,0,0,4,16,40,44,1,7,42,0,37,6,0,5,10,126,99,76,0,19,36,0,5,16,0,2,6,3,1,3,53,32,0,3,15,10,1,7,6,20,0,8,18,13,88,24,103,79,23,110,0,1,5,0,24,40,0,25,76,452,141,12,0.039770823423063206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057633059911207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777618522304785,0.0,0.06618502212445299,0.0,0.0,0.08113657118198897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654559979668205,0.0,0.07436070246807676,0.0,0.0,0.1834878498354775,0.2324488343089752,0.07273177445778675,0.0,0.10152612442041084,0.0,0.0,0.03517406137601522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524335465516353,0.0,0.1250968550625046,0.0,0.08921272050144442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025955637989778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041093892007255765,0.0,0.10507301513345732,0.0,0.033508634035479795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054661651119227,0.08523685260006786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101487126260169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285647513418282,0.0,0.1356160528218736,0.033357879773328616,0.12723344250114305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03516920780785342,0.0,0.0,0.03926545435126985,0.0,0.042274525531169366,0.0,0.0,0.1599452676450083,0.0,0.039893378608065716,0.0,0.07833249969882031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12887794201341726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16566076998369114,0.04371400891285647,0.0324185292308886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14045654373345234,0.31088024676194737,0.07972162648021998,0.0,0.03519592721458377,0.033397475137541,0.04449337842776023,0.0,0.1014351955685518,0.0,0.0376321147411832,0.026547333460399777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015927162589667,0.04219055872075963,0.16062877707985174,0.0,0.06348938364100214,0.042270091271842745,0.029236131305544668,0.14744780816963793,0.030673710817359118,0.07682181817936294,0.0,0.0,0.07793392561848922,0.038161177699468425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053899478456935636,0.03024750335518002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037965751119785625,0.0,0.10417904694254218,0.0415520456888306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956317194540732,0.0,0.2802602866244536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04505259007964802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338439424462933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579767223181429,0.04470407185970325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918525686931221,0.11800308390819368,0.04452018073684785,0.1688999611088934,0.0423904060925489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315419962666233,0.18211231093307534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393256275088445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926590365409772,0.05096707554806635,0.0,0.1894415481229601,0.1391441217988679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054003556957692996,0.0,0.0388503155576684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046915724162852994,0.031568228453774105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03588698218344734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737217987212653,0.0,0.0,0.028252051879075087,0.04348315208466367,0.0,0.07683331904036156
mentalhealth,BillyMan2021,2020/02/16,"I feel like I'm losing control. I'm spiraling and I don't know how to catch myself anymore. I'm spiraling. I'm spiraling and I dont know how to catch myself. I've dealt with a lot of mental health issues growing up and through the years I've become pretty good at handling things but this time around, I'm stumped and nothing is working. It just feels like theres too much pushing down on me. I'm doing everything I can but its just too much.

I've cried every single day since the beginning of December and to make it worse, there are a number of things at my job that trigger the trauma I just went through so 5 days a week, every week I'm sent back into that horrible headspace. I just want 1 day without a single tear. I've been in therapy and I'll be seeing a psychologist in March but it just feels like the effort put forth just doesnt compete with the weight of everything.

On top of all of the anxiety and PTSD I've been dealing with, I'm also dealing with a lot of financial hardships. I'm doing everything I can but I just got paid on Friday and I'm already down to $180 because of bills and $80 of that has to go to therapy on Tuesday and I'm going to need another $80 the following Tuesday for therapy again. This has been my life for the past 2 months and is going to continue being my life for the long, foreseeable future.

My entire pride and joy of my life's work and career is a sound system for when I work concerts and things have been so bad for me that I'm having to sell it. I hate it! I worked so hard to get all of that equipment! Getting rid of it makes me feel like I'm getting rid of a huge part of myself. That sound system encompasses everything about me and my passion for my work and what I've dedicated my life to.

I've never been the one to really contemplate suicide, it has crossed my mind before but is always dismissed as quickly as it entered but lately it's been popping into my head more often and stronger than before. I dont feel like it's a serious concern for me right now but I will admit that I am afraid of what might become if things dont change. 

I just dont know what to do anymore. Despite the depression, I force myself to do the things I need to do to keep myself afloat but its just not working! Today is particularly bad and I can't hold myself together. I've been quietly crying at work for the past hour and with the triggers I have to deal with here, it's only going to get worse as the day progresses. I'm already starting to shake and twitch and spaz and my body is tensing up real bad.

I feel like I'm losing control.",3.917409812409812,4.520667918367348,5.311133271490416,83.65155251494541,71.11502782931353,8.215233972376831,28.14476396619253,8.344100000000001,1.8354427540713247,2044,71,425,30,36,688,225,539,0.127,0.769,0.10300000000000001,-0.9698,1,0,0,0,0,1,37.0,0,0,0,16,29,21,1,2,24,0,39,10,2,8,3,83,87,41,1,4,20,0,8,6,0,2,6,4,0,0,30,31,1,4,10,1,3,15,10,11,0,1,11,13,42,10,72,72,10,65,0,3,1,1,5,20,0,5,34,277,72,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13767541935009173,0.049885139179145534,0.05190502784168938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654107060484965,0.04772041036804474,0.0,0.1237280877324278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553128697764029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047966250009524064,0.15625369386732224,0.038026174271556364,0.13778727482209732,0.1061613065020698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928994480702498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598960430101145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992859994072554,0.0,0.0,0.13704266029433573,0.1609193568117667,0.1929326420387752,0.05372766873685084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924348531013077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051154189706594,0.0,0.2242519281574117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18924674236733374,0.2673850406229542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036357665463907,0.0,0.14180761289189328,0.052321254048040666,0.04989086022361434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0558800880999436,0.061587181990719615,0.06401971713203909,0.06630685778312533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061431581455560276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510835095658504,0.06190237038484728,0.0554460720498071,0.0,0.0,0.10284699363371674,0.0,0.07036718176911215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17624291609237108,0.18285384682581046,0.0,0.0,0.05520419948041657,0.0,0.13957417989351795,0.0,0.10606622628732514,0.0,0.0,0.08327806129873988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628642114478419,0.06617515730189259,0.06298586053827,0.0,0.04979099681105003,0.0,0.09171272657696493,0.0925077286984968,0.048111181741064116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059855143275105015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042270197095335686,0.04744268275199847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755129281643031,0.11909724016999622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634627279040959,0.0,0.0,0.07291870015468803,0.06270897323879465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100191982617678,0.03996212576975326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05327204643976596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049708659790272634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051601252058037284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04415277506609945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823342531989722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140103662283861,0.0,0.2072119846252709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03637418902420261,0.0,0.059128798784861415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0367932485435583,0.0,0.10007469726721838,0.07596184547920175,0.0,0.057826740889229775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060131944152090035,0.0,0.3178928885987793,0.0,0.12714078178709196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04017057471059789
mentalhealth,Lolik_007,2020/02/16,"My family and I is putting a lot of pressure on me. I'm 19 and a girl. Single since forever. Now my mom is really concerned about this. She always asks me when I'll have a SO, when she'll have grandkids etc etc.

Now don't get me wrong I would love to have a gf or bf but it is not that easy. I see everyone in my life getting a boyfriend getting into a serious relationship with them. Or at least them all having been on dates. I have not a lot of experience in that.

Guys tend to either completely ignore me or see me as a sex toy. It hurts but for now it has been the truth and well most girls I meet are straight which isn't that surprising.

I don't go out at all. I'm only at school, my tutor and on weekends I have a job. Even if I would go out into town into a bar or club I'd be so uncomfortable there. I don't want to go alone and none of my friends have the time to meet with me. Maybe they don't even want to.

I also don't want to get a dating app. I don't want to be that desperate.

I don't know what to do. I would like to be in a relationship. My mom probably thinks that if I don't get a bf before I turn twenty I drop dead into a grave and I feel like I'm so unlovable and boring that no one wants me.

My past doesn't make it better. All of my male relatives were huge assholes and left me with deep trauma or pain. I don't want to dive deep into it but let's just say I'm afraid to end up like my mom.

The pressure on me getting a bf is so fucking high that when I'm around guys I immediately think I have to impress them so that they fall in love with me. I honestly at this point dont even know if I'm doing that for myself or for my mom.

I'm just tired of being so alone. I want someone that I can share a deep connection with but I guess I'll never have that. And yes I'm aware that I'm ""only 19"" but I'm a 100% sure that I'll have the same situation with 26. 

I know I'm young and I don't need to rush things but my family makes me feel like a freak for not ever being in a relationship that I just feel bad.

I really don't know how to overcome my trauma, the pressure from the inside and my familys pressure.

TLDR: I am single since day one, I have unresolved traumas and issues that keep me away from having healthy ideas of relationships, my family especially my mom make me feel like a freak because I have been single my entire life, all of my friends have a bf, I have low self esteem and I don't have the time and courage to go outside and meet new people. I also do not want to go outside alone and since my friends are all busy they can't go with me.",1.4213859649122789,2.4840987175438656,3.592807017543862,91.86464912280705,77.6140350877193,6.821052631578947,21.263157894736842,7.3871296695380915,0.4126736842105263,1999,49,487,25,45,688,215,570,0.20600000000000002,0.691,0.102,-0.9957,1,5,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,6,1,26,40,1,5,28,1,58,9,0,4,9,98,113,44,2,15,23,6,4,5,8,4,4,1,0,6,25,31,1,2,11,4,0,9,23,21,1,2,4,7,75,19,61,99,17,61,0,3,2,4,40,33,1,14,23,326,100,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018833966042326,0.0,0.10392090777663636,0.05406437368160048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578414919521142,0.0607428187891331,0.0,0.0610461159396985,0.0,0.05425137952684805,0.039608133951290286,0.0,0.0552889072977715,0.0,0.0,0.057465074033112414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812501178665188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04190347544851155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615017192464749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057548531020331965,0.0,0.14492851667317974,0.12874604944633425,0.058773573300508676,0.0,0.062086360932605875,0.0,0.06355798086161289,0.2450104473872385,0.0,0.13141317290210958,0.13925437818085962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505984841210968,0.060068305667415285,0.2036804164007837,0.0,0.22156061059248436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157724633174767,0.1286708560813005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864961505853437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.069557041002101,0.07334882367378595,0.0,0.06781697963144827,0.0644776242962573,0.05775273192455625,0.0,0.0,0.1428341601845476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059548666917685,0.06644130115523869,0.0917874748416933,0.15871742287440727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047877886676233,0.11728488056196515,0.0,0.1301138756518899,0.0,0.0652760828737036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3804894528653667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04817811126164754,0.05011269651652354,0.06275322348822701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805743205946621,0.09883277344864573,0.0691379409783823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062025953599685275,0.04504545775834621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06142234115127947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005399887505652,0.0,0.0,0.06531778333136007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324924927568393,0.0,0.0,0.2790351733009225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05167069793673748,0.0,0.0657581307102353,0.10355326525629227,0.0,0.06778305620704893,0.0,0.0,0.16124388077854748,0.07303457998601046,0.0,0.0,0.05505307471758649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061238133034581636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04316647783045319,0.08326666455463683,0.0,0.0,0.07577484608110191,0.07467916097775187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07067410096835992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30659132973183584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058420294300260224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846904701702425,0.07103992135074176,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Invincible_Overlord,2020/02/16,"There's nothing I've done right Every day just revolves around what I've done wrong, what new thing I've messed up, what I've forgotten to do, again. It's come to a point where I've begun imagining someone shouting my name to tell me off. My hands shake all the time, and I'm in a constant state of panic, anxiety, and fear. 

​

Sure, 3 hours may go by with quiet, but something will always crop up that I'm being told off for not doing, even though I'm really trying my best. I've stopped leaving the house when I can because I come home from being happy to being shouted at for forgetting to do something or another, and it's just not worth the sudden deflation of joy. I'm really trying, but it's not good enough. Getting everything right is feasible reasonable, but even if I try, it goes from being shouted at 8 times a day to only about 3. I don't know how long I can take it, but I've even failed at ending my life, so there's really no point at all.",7.5555611111111105,5.1818029449999985,8.003666666666664,77.26044444444446,64.55,11.288888888888893,33.72222222222222,9.725611199111238,2.8934555555555552,759,23,159,12,9,253,117,200,0.13699999999999998,0.774,0.08900000000000001,-0.3813,0,0,2,1,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,2,15,11,0,3,6,0,15,2,1,2,3,29,26,13,0,1,11,0,1,0,0,2,1,4,1,0,10,7,0,1,3,0,1,4,5,6,0,0,3,5,10,5,25,17,4,34,0,1,0,0,3,15,0,3,14,96,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254213925678557,0.1335260438638455,0.14974510476347538,0.0,0.12922358406139492,0.0942751245654997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970607663938356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512345951243045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932847177269582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123136279402332,0.0,0.1331742252517695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589539181602284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522262202389488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091504271678752,0.12733562554040329,0.0,0.2441884448497727,0.0,0.1038315590832548,0.0,0.11075647871654982,0.0,0.0,0.1386746467322497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438567026736011,0.0,0.07003780073668282,0.10336442425283976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118690485377954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12361565361298135,0.0,0.12136253542900707,0.14219768018331566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772722657681729,0.0,0.0,0.13048902199429938,0.0,0.0,0.08704515919000458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090598916148467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902199810245664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824816770488225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372645355877313,0.0,0.1445907735027914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329955137150065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368442154492741,0.12670702792881586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21048556687731595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441737635677452,0.18974602989606404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303072876457746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614837531345905,0.0,0.092658058307842,0.0,0.10771360658780653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08187245462202941,0.0,0.1210786439627107,0.0,0.14371968617948155,0.0,0.0,0.11775718158120448,0.0,0.25100725572794874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473910843469158,0.14974510476347538,0.0
mentalhealth,whatnowhuh-,2020/02/16,"How does one make friends?! First post. Ever. 

I’m 28, married, have a son. I have 1-2 close friends that I can share stuff with... and obviously my wife. She’s great by the way. 

But seriously how does a normal person go and make friends in life?? Or even online?? Especially when you’re not all kinda awkward?",-0.5121907600596138,1.5156698524590162,1.4678092399403866,94.41619970193744,104.57377049180329,4.185394932935917,18.660208643815203,6.1124844417494595,-0.02911147540983583,235,8,51,3,11,77,51,61,0.027000000000000003,0.738,0.235,0.9228,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,5,7,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,4,3,16,7,7,0,1,3,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,4,5,3,7,1,8,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,2,3,28,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3986787671223183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045225568253315,0.20604787600733665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19375691020429,0.0,0.0,0.5279668402058523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945753977458346,0.0,0.0,0.2511377919304161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089386073659118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30410138674714643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231845139040439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543554851577854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19889626386570464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21815856109236534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260763507477531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180808028502439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hollivertwist27,2020/02/16,Podcast Help?!? ‪So I’m doing a podcast episode on agoraphobia. I don’t suffer from this but would like to know input from anyone that does or anyone that has some key things to mention?‬ Just comment anything you’d like me to put into the world and I’ll mention you by name! ☺️,0.985639097744361,3.466142701754393,2.4909774436090224,91.70684210526319,86.89473684210527,3.95889724310777,22.177944862155385,5.288315135182226,0.12209974937343347,222,8,44,1,7,72,47,57,0.039,0.797,0.16399999999999998,0.8033,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,9,7,3,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,8,5,1,4,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,2,2,27,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5262654443012224,0.0,0.30968050563301025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32932145490403897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522403492242272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20681643858277698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677033236028107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3783070186364229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500112633986711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26732797552080456,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ventingthrowaway567,2020/02/16,What can I get out of a mental health screening? My college is advertising free mental health screenings this week and I was wondering what good it would even do? Or is it just another trick to get the EMTs sent to your house? I guess you can say I'm skeptical.,3.819423076923077,5.329581326923076,4.456923076923079,86.26307692307695,72.26923076923076,8.276923076923078,26.461538461538463,8.841846274778883,1.8289846153846159,207,7,43,4,4,66,41,52,0.066,0.8079999999999999,0.127,0.6416,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,2,4,2,0,2,0,7,2,0,0,0,7,13,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,2,3,6,3,4,10,0,3,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,3,1,28,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512752522553093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15827480595777962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503958647420205,0.0,0.0,0.2009921173987654,0.0,0.0,0.2639818811420342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5094356389719693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27650338146639336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4829857845495818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19056514102319952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922184938773644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25987089539863856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17022783721929724,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,worsttype,2020/02/16,"walk-in services I live in a major city, Indianapolis to be specific. I have a day off and is really like to speak to a therapist. I'm not in danger it just feels urgent
 where can I find a someone to talk to?",-0.07866666666666687,1.9485206888888909,3.391111111111112,86.78000000000004,86.55555555555556,7.155555555555559,20.11111111111111,8.238735603445708,1.1749111111111108,161,5,36,4,5,59,33,45,0.0,0.8170000000000001,0.183,0.7483,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,8,5,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,24,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713717818507325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21276174892058156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845902459758804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20557449898926725,0.0,0.3715612304331383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695659115606915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3565301164775733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382113773649176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4885642986402265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FruitScentedAlien,2020/02/16,"Nightmares I have recently had nightmares. Weekly pretty much. When I was 12, I had a time period where I had nightmares often like this. But eventually they went away. Why? I don't know. I have depression and anxiety and I'm wondering what I could do to help myself get a better sleep until hopefully this goes away. I've already been on depression medicine before but I find that my depression is just worse in the winter. I can't go outside because of the snow. I'm about to be going through some big changes in the sense that I am going to get my license and start schooling for my future job as a 20 yr old. I also just escaped from a toxic relationship last may. I feel as if this is why I am having my nightmares, I don't know. I also wake up in the middle of the night often every week or so. Does anyone have more info about constant nightmares like this? Is it insomnia to keep waking up so early? How do you deal with this? I think I need to start drinking chamomile tea and honey before bed. I also rarely drink caffeine, (I used to drink it constantly but stopped because of dehydration issues) but I have somewhat frequently this week. Could that have anything to do with this? (It doesn't explain my nightmares when I don't have caffeine though)

This might sound like so many questions and some people might think this is the wrong place for this but I thought I'd ask here since my mental health could be causing this. I just wanna know if anyone has dealt with this and found their mental health has caused them. Especially since my first sign of depression was when I was 12 yrs old aka my first year of nightmares constantly. Thanks to whoever reads and comments.",3.9647339031339013,5.929978236923077,4.3536752136752135,85.28817663817667,72.78461538461538,7.03019943019943,26.498575498575498,7.793537801064563,1.549438746438747,1337,47,252,18,27,420,167,325,0.038,0.8590000000000001,0.10300000000000001,0.9572,1,0,3,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,3,3,20,11,0,0,10,0,38,10,3,4,0,55,64,29,0,8,11,0,1,3,1,3,3,1,1,0,19,10,4,2,13,4,0,4,5,5,0,2,10,3,37,6,34,46,5,43,0,4,0,0,12,12,0,14,30,178,56,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419241755164914,0.2047773762970308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529707104349447,0.0,0.0,0.11936573507274988,0.0,0.07024067719602557,0.0,0.07979629461577352,0.0,0.16038945672189706,0.0,0.0,0.10406439440784104,0.0,0.14526325987711478,0.0,0.0,0.07549040477660253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536815390738222,0.09029528134696516,0.0,0.0,0.27671838846690056,0.0,0.20444935094651975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799824042202714,0.2940678318106619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469557039232105,0.0,0.0,0.2508490181805335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191607246623791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04315853491131663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801379543884844,0.1452074614319532,0.0,0.09358839769206682,0.0,0.0,0.08918992586872407,0.0,0.1455292667554922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814587749746134,0.0,0.0,0.05721229661988484,0.0,0.0,0.0847777215535577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089089439616047,0.08470261352753948,0.0758682936252233,0.0,0.0,0.1407281999068397,0.06957649467145921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510182262343378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653754002772482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17203745103381352,0.18109835662895413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274644724030726,0.06329035821685827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010078049005963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791334302363256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05917507106256361,0.0,0.08917880465417731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683769105520164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561820290716093,0.0,0.08537905235425589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427870697917607,0.09164035082969847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638478220367367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121465408952985,0.0,0.0854175968699749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083076687827968,0.0,0.0,0.07136139938090959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858429434425282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938529737219348,0.08386179125321838,0.06776309298125856,0.04977174308738394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372013861084635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20540219269016013,0.0,0.0,0.07912582433671338,0.15404094410811953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256489087758443,0.0,0.0,0.08698500910667388,0.0,0.09332333610107843,0.0,0.054966435755807744
mentalhealth,Mister_Driscoll,2020/02/16,"I feel like I'm an actor constantly playing a version of myself, trying to tailor it for a particular audience. Even when I'm home alone, I feel like I'm either playing for an audience of ""future me"" or I'm doing something that's a form of escapism.

My therapist said that recognizing the recipient of my actions in everything is excellent and a sign of empathy, but I can't help but feel it's counterproductive.  On top of that, if every interaction is fake, what even is real connection?",7.561595744680853,7.083082606382978,9.442000000000004,60.853000000000016,63.361702127659576,13.051914893617024,39.01276595744682,12.340626583579946,5.270062127659576,391,19,66,13,5,141,61,94,0.094,0.7859999999999999,0.12,-0.1747,0,1,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,3,6,0,0,7,0,5,0,0,0,0,11,13,6,0,1,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,6,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,4,7,5,11,12,3,7,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,5,46,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522513322768099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26319831343810546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217338626601349,0.0,0.20520706000501807,0.0,0.21889309545768884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3694488210865384,0.34799397089957723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163250950488339,0.0,0.2443072710502098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379790436403129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772208942307248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316782359742348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18750187942075836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28278815008390595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16535904061872395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yarggz682,2020/02/16,Thinking of relocating for my mental health I moved to a new city in the same state as my home city for a job opportunity (first career job) and I'm thinking about going somewhere totally new. I'm having a hard time being happy here partially because I was in an abusive relationship when I moved and because I don't entirely fit in here. I'm trying to have more creative outlets and start a band but I just feel sad frequently. Originally I was going to try to start a relationship with someone I knew that moved far away but it didn't work out so that's got me a little upset as well. I have a potential job opportunity on the other side of the country and it could be lucrative. Should I take it or am I just running away from my problems?,4.056284319707139,5.37645581208054,5.8484319707138495,77.25817571690055,71.41610738255035,8.639658328248933,29.65283709579012,9.095868883498916,2.5354375838926173,592,24,114,12,11,204,92,149,0.11199999999999999,0.802,0.086,-0.589,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,4,8,7,0,1,11,0,12,1,0,1,1,21,25,11,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,6,6,0,0,4,1,0,6,2,3,1,1,5,2,14,4,20,16,3,27,0,1,0,0,3,11,0,1,9,81,20,5,0.0,0.16305805870533024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585984082009128,0.0,0.0,0.16778463681014308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987895296250214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958517508854616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706012088533993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15642606232266298,0.0,0.11006786802934064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464998239431191,0.12328114077177843,0.0,0.0,0.14628439836879956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380448110358297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4097020117723559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13793212366206958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386893250266022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4388071629191899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26582991323414545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316844505568492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29550631738373945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660559619056493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19481731913711745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347366030275723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17636361116977886,0.0,0.0,0.08024775318055602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18687088122388684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373756200639592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018952899798142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xxspacedkittenxx,2020/02/16,Please help me I was 4 months clean of self harm but last night I relapsed. My boyfriend was annoyed with me and didn't want to talk so I couldn't go to him. My friends don't care. I'm scared that I won't be able to stop again,-1.6835989010989003,0.2304011346153878,-0.4390109890109883,111.44115384615387,95.34615384615385,2.9714285714285715,15.120879120879119,3.1291,-1.7794813186813192,177,4,50,0,7,54,40,52,0.22899999999999998,0.5529999999999999,0.218,-0.1571,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,6,11,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,3,0,9,2,5,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,26,10,0,0.3074465708251026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134622691960228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375324579652806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17472897130891085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060749557284941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25060998956964475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454009196212168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885177797174765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3374840102935043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30780765188385584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207338249762027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570390997559281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471139077600998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18133995313862425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alpha0963,2020/02/16,"I just cut myself for the first time. I need help. In the past few months, whenever I’ve had an anxiety/panic attack I’ve had a really strong urge to hurt myself. Sometimes I scratch myself with my fingernails or just hit myself hit today I was freaking out really bad and ended up using a blade and once I’d cut myself I just kind of sat there crying and watching the blood and I don’t know what to do. I’m messed up but I’m too scared to say anything and idk what do to.",0.9677227722772273,2.926243247524756,3.0697920792079247,91.04290594059408,81.87128712871288,6.02019801980198,18.020792079207922,7.1686216300943375,0.17649227722772265,372,8,81,5,10,126,65,101,0.21100000000000002,0.748,0.042,-0.9136,0,0,0,0,0,4,7.0,0,0,0,2,5,10,3,1,6,0,6,1,1,1,0,15,14,7,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,0,1,4,3,12,2,11,8,1,10,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,1,6,51,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194851400261631,0.0,0.0,0.26937369329918226,0.0,0.0,0.19770306884960046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600938944186745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097185599653834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20140663727864666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587099748121324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534800144465896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465720025848851,0.13012918773367604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889971230821045,0.0,0.0,0.17557084319102853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521650885478475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22603519914018216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033772081884665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882985398857603,0.23706007605228646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23418343975502864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13806948083620782,0.0,0.22444163759258892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20450361256792848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pinky117,2020/02/16,"Tired All the Time I'm a full time employee (overnights), a full time college student (days), and a single mother (have him half the time). I'm exhausted all of the time. It's probably because of my schedule, but I'm wondering if I'm depressed too. I haven't taken a shower in days, haven't cleaned my house, haven't cooked (ordering out), have barely done any school work. I wake up after 10 hours of sleep still exhausted. I just skipped an exam so I can sleep. It won't affect my grade in the long run, but I didn't know the material anyway, which will start to affect my grade.

I do have bipolar and my meds were recently switched because of weight gain. I was on Lamictal and Invega (among others). Those have been discontinued for Tegretol. I'm wondering if that's part of why I'm so exhausted as well, and if it's bringing on depression. My psychiatrist doubled my antidepressant when I told him. I'm not sad or suicidal; I'm just effectively useless right now. I am seeing a therapist.

My house is getting to the point where I'm worried for my son. If CPS was called right now, I'm not sure if I'd pass the test. I love him so much, but I can't find the motivation or energy to do something about it. He deserves so much better.

Does depression present like this? Please help me help myself and my son.",3.0530825496342766,4.8642023908046,4.408465691396729,84.58651253918498,74.90038314176246,8.11710205503309,27.18930686172065,8.841846274778883,2.096339463601532,1028,40,210,22,22,340,145,261,0.127,0.71,0.162,0.9181,2,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,0,5,15,13,0,0,14,0,21,11,3,4,3,31,41,21,1,5,14,3,1,1,0,2,5,0,2,0,9,6,2,0,6,1,0,3,8,8,1,1,8,2,26,5,20,31,9,35,0,5,1,1,12,13,0,9,19,131,35,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251339810483273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14793195653400906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731281666215772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389875933310353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650480066282418,0.0,0.3135224345536622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106182925826235,0.12416999460385478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089992366345074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339363387430348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16265941919796398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949261543905812,0.2800134762248865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668370441907631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05927918475210539,0.0,0.0,0.10737952731863798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095114823809054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13477817976424553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17839347951112913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13139626986103442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319171392972606,0.1147027920146709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308219307852647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198057615049798,0.0,0.0,0.20724246415448372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279963688705055,0.0966899700051983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24284948371268356,0.0,0.0,0.093411238078169,0.0,0.0,0.08588303355591251,0.0,0.09689997569362956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13272310851607086,0.0,0.11435879364370413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408817409978892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3537632336651531,0.1394591627232816,0.0,0.11594281187460295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775591600964466,0.10909663716748487,0.0,0.1094878722829672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26316984770434315,0.08833486385087337,0.12322372874912918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StudentReporting,2020/02/16,"Working on school project Hey all,

I’ve been on this subreddit on another account, it’s a strong community. 

I’m working on a project for my graduate journalism class about mental health in US agricultural workers. If you’d be interested in a brief interview (me sending you questions via email), please PM. I need your real identity but can grant anonymity/alias in the final piece.

THANKS!",4.1400000000000015,7.277122071428575,4.848214285714288,75.88803571428575,78.28571428571428,8.642857142857144,34.464285714285715,9.188382445141503,4.0285714285714285,315,18,51,9,8,101,58,70,0.0,0.7979999999999999,0.20199999999999999,0.9208,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,3,0,4,1,3,0,0,4,0,4,1,0,0,1,6,7,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,7,3,9,4,2,10,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,2,1,29,9,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783739282439491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908151406217529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28218775771838256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675365936842113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19684652090158852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914120843132189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973930170002301,0.0,0.0,0.30216893424481045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686751081005136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444139261492148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31933401731409283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3865382617703861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ztgarfield97,2020/02/16,"Does anyone need help today? Hi everyone 

Title speaks for itself.  I'm happy to talk and give advice.   Happy Sunday!",1.6050000000000004,4.042877952380955,3.8765476190476207,76.62053571428574,102.8095238095238,4.0047619047619065,10.011904761904765,5.985473137389443,-0.32672380952380964,91,1,12,1,4,31,20,21,0.0,0.621,0.379,0.8858,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930483447064759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096895652762944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26243513976744803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28655706934593184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876811344589487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6384754540943073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010094705883619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223641096431145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24103965277237596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28425998305320466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AlexRid3r427,2020/02/16,"It’s hasn’t been my day, week, month, or even my year. Here’s my story. Let me start this off, my name is Alex and I’m a 18 y/o Asian guy. Growing up in a Asian family with a older and younger sister just made me feel really left. Maybe classic middle kid syndrome? Anyways I grew up not looking the best, and started to eat a lot to cope with the loneliness because I didn’t really have friends and my family forgets about me all the time.

Fast forward to freshman year, after many attempts, I finally start dating this girl, she was the most caring and understanding girl I’ll probably ever meet, even lost my virginity to her, and she loved me the way I was. A year into the relationship she tells me she has Huntington’s disease, a irreversible, incurable disease that’ll degrades her nervous system. I was heartbroken, the one person that truely loves me is cursed with this horrible disease. 

She hid it for me for a couple months before this scared that I’ll leave her, but no way in hell was I leaving her, loved her even more. Another 6 months passes and she needs to go off to college. She decides to break up, and I’m in no position to ask her to stay, so we end it. And this really messed me up, and I never really let her know.

I started binge eating, grades started slipping, life kinda just fell apart, started crying ever night. One day I finally had enough and manned up and asked my parents to see a psychiatrist, and they said “if you lost some weight you’ll be happy again, stop being fat” 

That fucked me up. Hard. I’ve had body image issues all along and is just recovering from a breakup, and lost the support of my parents, and soon everyone in the family. I’ve never felt so alone, ever. I need help but I can’t get it.",3.545153072147293,5.069890231213872,4.788702633269106,83.5545525583387,72.9884393063584,7.900492399914366,26.10961250267609,8.515128840125781,1.7824347248983088,1364,46,270,24,27,451,188,346,0.163,0.76,0.077,-0.9796,2,1,0,0,0,0,46.0,1,2,1,5,16,17,2,2,18,0,21,11,2,1,7,52,52,22,0,3,8,3,4,0,1,2,2,1,0,6,13,22,4,1,5,0,0,6,8,9,0,2,14,7,46,8,33,32,8,59,1,3,2,5,39,17,2,6,33,179,59,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516482352432933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622465938195399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374671308968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05012625795130268,0.0,0.06997113351671727,0.0,0.08629464588825593,0.0,0.0,0.09133828772847266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383831837345587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098522883991912,0.09032509675033187,0.10606227609567773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682823388723698,0.0,0.0,0.0728308108175778,0.08496491580200173,0.0,0.16293516106299386,0.22314350630132027,0.0,0.07857368254694311,0.0,0.0,0.2325555825528237,0.0,0.04157763788614242,0.0,0.07895308611590861,0.18015650101579336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635302037658298,0.0760197233296942,0.04296144955431908,0.0,0.04673284336017551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141999987525418,0.0,0.08753468856749679,0.07366135994738995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05511661033869821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582609366714371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04519110876615207,0.0,0.0,0.17413805005125332,0.08934244615837628,0.16817019475966424,0.0580810326266777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905195698084751,0.0,0.2692891980516588,0.06990846595336575,0.22264563829490647,0.0778074138091215,0.0,0.08336767015431881,0.08261044996974128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969040849584024,0.0,0.0,0.12194406510934523,0.12684071182509093,0.0,0.0,0.07716668910231736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144149227960083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18261195827983606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179951017410734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865716376464026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107129484351428,0.0,0.0,0.08828356500945964,0.0,0.0,0.07821895687560472,0.0,0.0823259398415406,0.0,0.06552615798967071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3492142085749552,0.08764556260161836,0.0,0.06874743150119901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331290944753798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187208980694136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047948604263365405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560366940497538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13053968566032587,0.065959436962968,0.10013321439479164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588590460572587
mentalhealth,DebPratimBose69,2020/02/16,Mental health involves emotional social and psychological Wellness. It demonstrates the way we deal with stress full situations and emotions. It is the key to our all round development and happiness as human beings at every stage of our lives. Awareness on Mental Health,8.048181818181817,11.443230181818185,7.204545454545452,63.00181818181821,65.36363636363637,8.945454545454545,33.72727272727273,9.516144504307137,4.029881818181819,224,10,28,5,4,69,37,44,0.055,0.7859999999999999,0.159,0.6486,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,6,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,2,6,1,2,5,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,0,0,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179167326463404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4755333341146588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780912375229399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22501095465089307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4493601595081115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18664661781942055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42602941879630135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375925999066165,0.0,0.21546860060737305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24212755845587985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16777839603329608,0.0,0.0,0.19005010520724885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Iwanttobeanactor1,2020/02/16,"I bought Humidifiers and Essential oils and they really helped!  I read an article about Essential oils and how they could be used to relieve a person from stress, anxiety and depression. I tried it for myself, first because I didn't really believe and wanted to try it out for myself. It really helped! It helped my muscle twitches a lot and overall I feel happier. I used an humidifier to use them, I think the essential oils can also be used with messaging but NOT DIRECTLY with skin. Putting them in humidifiers worked good for me though.",5.405378787878785,7.584621191919197,6.399886363636366,71.21982954545456,69.40404040404039,11.010606060606062,30.556818181818183,10.9516,4.07288787878788,434,18,73,15,8,144,63,99,0.057999999999999996,0.856,0.086,0.5837,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,4,2,4,4,0,1,5,0,5,2,1,5,0,21,13,10,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,9,0,0,2,1,1,1,2,2,0,1,2,5,15,2,12,8,1,4,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,1,1,54,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361383163775977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023069457666386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377478000051313,0.0,0.0,0.19179859010611747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359202414136771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14662471599930801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607684676496581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14480334460485295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278656036791346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34231843824223296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14472924911992874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864421716261306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113501493579605,0.0,0.0,0.17028287965605268,0.0,0.3271741811700729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19500569201049928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908087472841507,0.1672568026225108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311592402760268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5881197855985586,0.0,0.0,0.10041008190424223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393442603312313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,presentwonderful,2020/02/16,"Is your anger towards your enemies only hurting yourself? How I let go of resentment I've always clung onto grudges/resentment  - whether its politicians or people that I've perceived that had wronged me. It can feel empowering and motivating to feel anger towards to people that we think deserve it, but in the only I've realised that by doing this I'm only hurting myself.

I've found mindfulness to be really effective at letting go of these resentments by wishing my enemies well - I talk about it on the latest episode of my [podcast](https://anchor.fm/shaun-donaghy/episodes/Could-you-feel-compassion-for-Donald-Trump--Compassion-guided-meditation-eas8d8).",8.363035714285715,10.540097803571435,7.57,65.72500000000001,62.03571428571429,10.6,40.785714285714285,10.686352973137794,5.198121428571429,542,30,74,14,8,168,78,112,0.215,0.682,0.10400000000000001,-0.89,1,0,0,0,0,1,31.0,1,2,0,2,3,8,4,0,2,0,7,0,0,3,0,15,15,5,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,0,7,0,0,2,0,7,1,0,2,2,9,1,15,10,0,9,0,2,0,0,4,6,0,1,1,49,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772026843554135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513397559563169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28752558516839954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078311112481606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154505613572636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4058330627500413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3876541663138591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19139083909248092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4324825341642983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628193468508108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214301863565903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235261143950138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145558887477635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704276563598878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21797243216442255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072424907955957,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Stillofdawn,2020/02/16,"Good News ~Inspite Of the Many Mind Battles- You are loved, You are Worth It and You have a Purpose~. So much to be Grateful for  There is no one else like you and you are simply irreplaceable. You do not have to allow the thoughts you think control your life. 

 Instagram: stillofdawn 
Journals:  https://www.amazon.com/s?k=stillofdawn&ref=is_s 
Board Certified Psychiatric/Mental Health and Addiction Medicine Nurse x12 years 
Mental Health & Infertility Coach.",7.403751600512162,11.581765098591552,4.211779769526249,76.362509603073,81.11267605633802,6.525480153649168,28.989756722151085,7.686295010490155,2.5937774647887326,386,16,53,7,11,104,56,71,0.079,0.747,0.174,0.8287,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,8,0,1,2,4,1,0,3,0,8,5,0,2,0,10,11,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,8,3,4,9,1,1,0,0,0,1,9,0,0,0,2,33,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24295588449721764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4829485438635019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499621904740801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861752161332328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18692869471629284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4737904165965853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741623006536945,0.10888064367244688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20114447830245027,0.0,0.0,0.2259502586563561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245956295222664,0.0,0.22503024650729253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16383151149400166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101917781206986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428029744462991,0.0,0.17693001651727938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351783483172428
mentalhealth,getrich3,2020/02/16,"I (M/23) want to help my brother (M/12). Though I don’t want to be his therapist. My younger brother is dealing with a lot of issues i struggled with at his age and then some. 
I’ve worked on overcoming some of his problems so I know what worked for me, but his behavior really annoys me because it reminds of  the behaviors I didn’t like in myself. 

I’ve talked to our dad about getting him to a therapist for years and nothing has come about.  I want to take matters into my own hands. 

His parents are divorced and don’t care to get involved with this because they don’t want to talk to each other. 

What do I need to do to help him see a therapist? And can I just bring him to sessions myself or does he need parents involved? (We live in NY if that matters)

TL/DR: Want my brother to get help, can I bring him to see a therapist as his brother?",2.5685960591133004,4.0201166149425305,3.905418719211824,89.1993103448276,75.3793103448276,6.810509031198686,28.52052545155993,7.447530270364453,1.5488042692939252,657,28,140,8,14,216,94,174,0.045,0.8109999999999999,0.14400000000000002,0.9209,2,0,0,0,1,0,22.0,2,0,1,2,5,5,1,1,5,0,12,1,1,0,0,29,30,11,0,9,4,7,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,11,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,1,3,30,2,29,28,5,11,0,0,2,0,30,5,0,5,4,98,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516221538718826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679728078973485,0.0,0.0,0.10712848480881346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821371637865595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883168380518812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949250088011449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500754948171885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12980359707744846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834714505957275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060757917913545366,0.0,0.10981559896537144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572973741652528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844285067292911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11933051269990552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27618277893444426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899945313501957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967069654757912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19820384795121032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001214680460624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350617280808828,0.19991797819667906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.577584276225263,0.0,0.0,0.12218689677407188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3667652412440208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18107679547887004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008627184523426
mentalhealth,likeabananapeel,2020/02/16,"My boyfriend is depressed and being bullied. How do I help him? My (27F) boyfriend (31 M) is depressed and being bullied. How do I help him?

My boyfriend and I have been together for 3 years. He's always struggled with life, though you'd never tell. He has a successful career and is well liked amongst his friends but often comes home and just sits near silently for hours before going to bed.
I tried to talk to him and he tells me he's just tired from putting on a display of happiness for everyone all the time and wants to be alone.

On his good days he's very attentive and does whatever I ask of him. I love him so much and it is so hard to see him struggle on his bad days.

He was at bar for a friend's birthday recently but came home early, having only stopped for 3 or 4 beers. 
It seems so stupid now but I ended up causing an argument because he'd not given the night out a chance.
We argued and he threw a mug at me which caught the side of my head. I ran out of the house and into the car where I stayed for half a hour. He didn't follow me and this is the first time he's ever done anything like this during an argument. We don't even argue that often.

Some nosy neighbour must have called the police because after the half hour they turned up, saw my head and lead my boyfriend away. I told them it was nothing and I'd slipped but my boyfriend told them the truth.

Now it's all over town and my boyfriend is being treated like some evil wife beater! His attention seeking ex has been all over Facebook claiming he was constantly violent to her too. It's all lies. 

He's a good man and this is a making his life worse. I've told police I don't want to pursue anything but they said they have to act because he admitted it. It's like they are determined to ruin his life over this. 

What else can I do to help him? 

Tl:Dr - my boyfriend is depressed and now being bullied because of an incident with the police.",2.9105120457329536,4.309904296202536,3.688721927317274,91.31104940792162,74.39240506329114,6.61576153532054,25.65332788893425,7.1029339738359605,0.9660845242956309,1507,51,326,15,31,479,195,395,0.182,0.693,0.124,-0.9853,0,1,1,0,0,0,35.0,2,1,6,3,18,26,5,2,21,0,36,9,2,5,8,59,58,29,0,3,9,2,1,4,3,1,4,1,3,1,14,26,2,1,4,2,0,11,5,12,1,3,17,4,48,14,40,33,7,52,0,4,2,1,58,18,0,6,25,210,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994623217694841,0.0,0.0,0.07990802941452346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580556942643134,0.0,0.08977888061940137,0.0,0.09022715877335638,0.0,0.08018442711535942,0.2341658816930843,0.0,0.08171791014663611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806151050684404,0.10983737862900808,0.0,0.09865343140246173,0.0,0.08272483756198637,0.0,0.10377870001352224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386804546854405,0.0,0.24814198040077465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840400513500119,0.09827618368432996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022413266848535,0.0,0.08505767100193602,0.0,0.0,0.06342958961446725,0.08686830354777668,0.0,0.0917646579032102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168652070699464,0.0,0.0,0.14839135003274492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545783682879918,0.16109762315232048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223004052611882,0.08602765298952439,0.0,0.19711729874413444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931088143728075,0.0,0.19265998069857912,0.0,0.2837226077348637,0.11081040919490548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034950857674784,0.1876695595563595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667448679807715,0.0,0.06410347945617828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059608247731299,0.0,0.07406738586978683,0.0,0.0,0.09012145794193814,0.0,0.09214726873908052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303822859730133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654075311169458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482204667615332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135038077090953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652671068384043,0.08742579964963433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235952812911407,0.0,0.08028877263914544,0.0,0.20079129737885265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718853814443391,0.16787599919304952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435297442951156,0.0,0.11199646305327238,0.11037702253254834,0.0,0.27529397370963066,0.0,0.06520082156578852,0.10445747826995863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079238155380454,0.11328675117338448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863461514017139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978669095585036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061842784775362
mentalhealth,saacheka,2020/02/16,"irrational? i have some issues i have to work around and i've tried asking for help. but my parents are pretty conservative and do not believe in suff like mental illness, they think its just in one's head and not a real sickness (they're asian) . so i took matters into my own hands (teenager here) and went to a few therapist and one of them even referred me to a psychiatrist. this numerous change of doctors has suddenly made me fear them and i do not even last one session with them. is my fear irrational and what should i do to get help?",4.141518691588786,5.561418794392524,4.844941588785048,84.14909462616824,71.33644859813084,7.966822429906544,28.328271028037385,8.472884824447931,1.968963551401869,429,16,85,7,8,138,72,107,0.147,0.73,0.12300000000000001,-0.5848,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,4,1,6,3,0,2,3,0,9,5,2,1,0,23,15,9,0,1,5,1,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,10,0,1,2,0,0,2,3,2,0,3,3,1,14,1,12,11,3,8,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,3,63,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586662437414745,0.16662493594597766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20080893134802247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18854817185568956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18243027670687725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354440428232803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4011260993592603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312002365812223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829197304003128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23893328143901496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18603021908428968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528467798911926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707623698454378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16864952858543136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17961817272873734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36232836084075737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979080088274722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18132827820440406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20286956291484654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069436669419044,0.0,0.11420529146017902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980247766228511,0.12100933584904693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16522490768852524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12975663499493167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iotaipsolae,2020/02/16,"Mental health system is making my mental health worse? I feel like I've been subjected to endless gaslighting and emotional manipulation since I was a child.

I have been seeing professionals since I was eight, for meltdowns and tantrums. I've been diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome, generalized anxiety disorder, bipolar disorder, Tourette's, depression, and ADHD at various times by various professionals (I did not carry all diagnoses at once).

Now I only am diagnosed with OCD and Asperger's. I'm almost twenty-one, and suffer severe anxiety because I'm constantly afraid that whatever I'm doing at any given point in the day is pathological. I've become a walking mental health diagnosis. 

The bipolar dx was the worst. I was dxed at age thirteen with little to no explanation or elaboration. The doctor also dxed me with ADHD and Tourette's in a span of minutes via a cosmopolitan type quiz that I filled out. She had me on three meds and tried to put me on three more. No meds for anxiety, unfortunately. 

I am terrified of severe mania and psychosis. My parents think I'm being ""dramatic"", and what happened to me is ""not that bad."" They don't understand how serious a bipolar diagnosis really is, and that it's considered chronic. My mom keeps saying that even if I did have a manic episode at some point, I'm never going to have one again because ""it hasn't happened yet."" (?) They don't understand why I'm upset with my old doctor. I've been screamed at and slapped by my mom when having anxiety attacks and crying at night. And they wonder why I'm depressed...

Now I'm being pressured to go on SSRIs, which I was told for four years or so was the one class of medication I could never take. (Stimulants were okay though, apparently.) A doctor I saw at school told me that suffering was ""my choice."" I've tried to explain how much backlash I'd gotten from my mother and doctor for years at the suggestion of SSRIs and how anxious it made me, but I was dismissed and scolded.

I've been told that the trick is to ""stick with one doctor"" and ""not go doctor shopping"". Well, if I'd done that, I'd still be on 3-6 meds and sporting a ton of random dxes. Also, I was not ""doctor shopping"" at twelve years old. I was moving, doctors were finding new jobs, retiring, etc. ""Stick with one doctor"" is ridiculous advice given turnover rates due to factors we can't control. ""Self-diagnosis"" is also bad, only a doctor can diagnose me, but when they do, they do so in a matter of minutes, and no one can agree on anything. I get spun around and around in circles, then stripped of my agency and scolded when I try to take a stand.

What is the matter with this system? I feel worse than I did going into it. How do I reclaim my agency and feel confident again? I'm in despair, and the people who were supposed to help me won't acknowledge their role in creating that despair. :(",5.947585845347312,6.757117866055044,6.851297509829621,73.67660550458716,66.6697247706422,9.6781127129751,33.002621231979035,9.749128247673873,3.2820841415465267,2267,95,396,47,35,756,248,545,0.13699999999999998,0.816,0.047,-0.9889,3,0,0,0,0,0,92.0,1,0,6,1,23,21,4,3,20,1,52,24,0,9,3,76,89,43,0,3,10,4,3,1,0,1,24,2,0,1,18,36,0,2,10,3,2,8,14,18,1,9,31,7,46,3,59,53,9,64,0,6,2,0,22,29,0,8,25,273,64,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137656613112607,0.05596430956032286,0.0,0.0,0.057348378757766674,0.0,0.0,0.1373981831712442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03894607075711352,0.0,0.17524785384038322,0.06469964081178574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047128943665402816,0.10196621098571478,0.0,0.06515374074495958,0.0,0.0,0.09563736038621456,0.06982342963371811,0.06325103874016884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188932995260441,0.06423401077592847,0.04572603002434181,0.0,0.06290922457479871,0.036934892880658765,0.0,0.09865441815526817,0.2325144040909235,0.0,0.0,0.13127447182429394,0.5861903466746463,0.0,0.05860785650359606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442188012285202,0.0,0.0,0.06387201993846554,0.03782678719136538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687342897507767,0.04091423194394003,0.0,0.0,0.05234442373186269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029921600699105967,0.0,0.13019313762111726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10128866200303573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18262837271994845,0.0,0.0,0.03838737341386903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056832377770379326,0.05090486992707561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027979593336421853,0.057400332437144826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05419096402887976,0.03822866725692727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19084466206122125,0.057694250784089775,0.17314632336512126,0.0,0.0,0.13414960962911698,0.0,0.06086973882185483,0.042100587511988516,0.0,0.08834145893569333,0.0553124427662726,0.0,0.05374471491405868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019202660357962,0.06099147471660741,0.194040696245984,0.08711396516285405,0.0,0.0,0.0635923852106351,0.0,0.0,0.039704323788347116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827873185312938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05757291739464911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03668910599278066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04554399540695053,0.0,0.057961051865476475,0.04563736920083387,0.0,0.05974587771859751,0.12939928162357148,0.0,0.09474990479863103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045736491241482935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612094618970566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03669678114926502,0.05626821655808769,0.0,0.0333950321912179,0.0,0.0,0.1641739544883385,0.0,0.11664923029119227,0.0,0.0,0.11924173140738173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05149327803818994,0.0,0.10335587962480247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210768036004469,0.0,0.0,0.11672756464127446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11064144699205823
mentalhealth,Laurensshittytoughts,2020/02/16,"Just my feeling rn it brings you nothing if you read this My mental health? yeah there's nothing wrong with it. I just don't have any purpose in my life, feel really uncomfortable around other people, i am always stressed but I procrastinate at the same time and never do anything. I never talk with my so called friends from school and my only clos4e friends I have are from my previous school which is in another country and I hate texting. I'm confused af about my sexuality and I hate myself. I don't have any hobby and the things I like are related to art but I'm bad at it. I sometimes cannot sleep but I don't want to admit it so start watching videos with no sense and I say I was just watching videos I like while I find it really boring but I don't know what to watch    and oh yeah i have suicidal thoughts and a guy in my school told me I should just kill myself. So too be honest i don't know wtf am i doing with my life.",0.4097307692307695,2.750353005128208,2.222852564102567,93.5973557692308,88.17948717948721,5.096153846153847,19.407051282051285,6.6274283507984215,0.14001282051282038,736,22,161,9,24,242,106,195,0.2,0.654,0.146,-0.9279,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,2,0,0,11,13,3,2,3,2,20,4,1,0,2,35,34,17,2,3,9,0,2,2,2,1,3,1,0,1,10,13,0,0,7,4,0,1,9,8,0,0,3,6,34,5,16,29,1,12,0,0,3,0,10,6,0,2,7,110,44,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470537620652416,0.0,0.0,0.1874905756176909,0.14455169291328046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344190317923356,0.12271907807140416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151021361127476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14076410764327002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394060118499023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599584431852742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21301095466892292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649690127312114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27220410713550003,0.0,0.1465321064904054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525147668917127,0.0,0.15152164876264276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19474038291405252,0.13469677321007986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138924172163906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21264264487752554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645488120421308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484400066045006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557044365289012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13789107077763546,0.0,0.17662530436985074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962684744287024,0.0,0.4185461113177944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13795332193173646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634089908103725,0.0,0.09757360481466104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15791102272509494,0.0,0.0,0.15078964498487865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080163497411574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09158391639220667,0.0,0.0,0.10944049146411557,0.08038363930665766,0.0,0.0,0.131725180615424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08130972261340838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507214520269551,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,madsadchadglad,2020/02/16,"I lost my mind yesterday. For years I (25M) have been struggling with social anxiety, and depression but yesterday I reached a breaking point. A thought popped into my head telling me that I could end up being alone forever, and I couldn't cope with it. I started crying uncontrollably, experienced heavy anxiety,  and I felt this massive feeling of self hatred and insignificance. It got so bad that I split myself into three alter egos (with names, and very distinct personalities) that night, and functioned as them for the entirety of the next day. This was a very very odd experience because I'm usually a very composed individual. Even when drunk I usually have a lot of control over my actions but I completley lost it yesterday. I felt as if ""I"" as a person didn't exist, and my ego's would refer to me the progenitor. They'd say things like ""the progenitor was so damaged that he left, and put us in charge."" I know this all sounds so crazy. Now, I'm feeling a bit better, and I'm back to being my whole self but I still feel kind of ""off"". The only thing that I have left to do is to keep trying, avoid negative thoughts, and hopefully I will be better one day",4.935669642857143,6.261456227678576,5.936964285714287,77.43303571428571,69.3125,9.35,30.964285714285715,9.673873057562805,2.940041071428572,921,38,174,21,16,305,135,224,0.235,0.6859999999999999,0.079,-0.991,0,2,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,0,2,5,8,13,0,3,12,0,17,2,1,1,2,40,34,21,0,5,4,0,5,1,0,2,0,2,0,4,13,15,1,3,9,1,0,2,3,8,0,2,11,8,27,5,22,15,4,28,0,4,0,0,12,9,0,3,17,118,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541884646194958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17050349847578697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569093782211745,0.09304824095415906,0.06793315163203166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19712029820128302,0.12166426557914913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499010194330215,0.08897624615317921,0.0,0.12241225945250846,0.1437399275135565,0.0,0.09598362015255843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870328879448596,0.0,0.0,0.07360546118985536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901028451902266,0.0,0.0,0.16904313793571027,0.0,0.2140008925517444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912922316138573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143701998605653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068565470616047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990535201638084,0.0,0.11604822951191275,0.06124483593435408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421610624894401,0.0,0.0,0.05444424505346412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24330114490604526,0.09474280770342842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125232316052595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851833578229876,0.10457944809728886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551503047050481,0.08475559329755251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946112561006153,0.0,0.0,0.10534738193310718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120285768770211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862203309517297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325136872673081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359965134381048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887822587990151,0.0,0.08899660216989255,0.0,0.0,0.11650190499663045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974039909324422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480723574346214,0.0,0.0,0.1769427668991247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566084804390298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340493130343333,0.0,0.2454721397451614,0.3678006435836356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441944321518572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916420045537978,0.0,0.0,0.07176408868988263
mentalhealth,Ducky118,2020/02/16,"I feel like I am a floating, amorphous blob with no direction or inclination. I know I have a personality, but I can't express it properly unless I am drunk, and I feel like I act around people however I feel like they would most want me to act. I find most types of comedy funny, I can hang with so many different kinds of people. I am like Ditto the pokemon.

That may sound like a power but it's not. I want to be ME, not a shapeshifter who changes to whatever makes himself the most popular. I also don't know what career I want to do or have any specific goals in mind. I know what I \*don't\* want to do, but I don't know what I \*do\* want to do. I'm 23 and time is running out for me to get fresh graduate positions. I need to work out who I am FAST. But I am constrained by my own head that never expresses itself properly and \*can't\* because there's so many compaeting thoguhts, issues and problems.

I just want to \*be\* something, I want to have an identity. Yeah I have some attributes but those are the ones I express, not how I really feel inside.",3.8249999999999993,4.683952611111113,5.3222962962962965,82.55233333333334,71.5,8.908148148148149,29.21481481481481,9.21078282632365,2.3731892592592594,828,32,172,17,15,280,117,216,0.051,0.736,0.213,0.9854,3,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,1,3,7,8,0,0,8,1,25,2,1,3,1,51,44,16,0,10,12,0,4,5,0,2,0,1,0,1,11,9,1,1,9,1,0,4,10,1,0,1,0,5,33,7,21,40,5,11,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,7,8,126,44,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455510494767213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890970218072779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638896138940133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969970029437425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830872513696352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659857521859448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26443029373489896,0.280208409195516,0.0,0.0,0.11949670491397878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830780500346775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418000538041766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13646169138245995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13614868277995704,0.28741166580851363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193720524713999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727194693854277,0.2651056989729585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201312790064992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096944254758996,0.10083703762014136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859481934269531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18128142504154174,0.11415971740237428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251033639591936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375729370592475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065232493893182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762372765395001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5398091332001355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518243845900096,0.0,0.0,0.09287605386708657,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,street_beat0987,2020/02/16,"Need help getting my sibling on public assistance How can I (F, 40) help my brother (M, 42) get on public assistance?  He has been diagnosed with pure O, a form of OCD. It's severe and he hasn't been able to work in years. My aging parents (70s) are paying his rent to keep him off the streets but they won't be around forever.  He refuses to see a psychologist and says he would sooner go back to being homeless than accept disability benefits or go back on the anti-psychotic meds.   Is there any way for me to get him on public assistance like housing and food stamps?",5.241785714285712,5.659400321428574,6.453571428571429,77.29142857142857,68.10714285714286,9.971428571428572,31.17857142857143,9.957137785484203,2.9856464285714286,444,17,86,10,7,150,84,112,0.016,0.862,0.12300000000000001,0.9064,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,1,5,3,0,0,4,0,11,2,0,1,1,14,19,6,0,2,2,2,0,1,0,2,1,1,1,0,1,5,1,2,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,2,2,9,3,16,13,1,15,0,0,1,0,17,8,0,1,5,51,10,2,0.21008305611074526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286368221026566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870184601329434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32308180499202105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21322987973881632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25403326535045845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292791778784585,0.0,0.23879008430732898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816284883005355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424076404607617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18673147300458603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263596951065816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23335491550419485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557739241533794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332723721574809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16706647833571114,0.0,0.0,0.1674089961752978,0.0,0.0,0.2373340556406454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16675415137935432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15294296692574494,0.0,0.0,0.14923697548372955,0.0,0.0,0.13528660029176606
mentalhealth,AndruilOfTheAbyss,2020/02/16,"I don't feel like I can trust my therapist anymore.. Hi,

 It's my fist post and it's kinda long..apologies in advance.

So I've been with my therapist for 4 yrs now and for the most part she's been really great. She helped me a lot especially when I had extreme suicidal thoughts and when I was self harming..

I must say sometimes it felt like she didn't know exactly what to do with me when I was in those situations but she did her out most best, always worried about me..

She told me during those 4 yrs that **I don't have depression**. That my life has just been objectively hard and that with enough hard work and change of environment I can move on and have a balanced life.

For a while I tried to believe that. But no matter how I looked at it trough the years I thought **she is terribly mistaken**.

I went through a rough life..I won't elaborate too much but the first time I wanted to cease to exist I was in the third grade. I cried almost everyday since I can remember myself.. At first at reasonable things like bulling or being hit at home or just being lonely (started at first to second grade)..But then I started to cry just for being alive when I didn't want to.. 

I read a lot. Not just on the internet, mainly books.

Anything from self help to psychology (not the popular but the academic ones) to poetry to novels.. I even watch a lot of Ted talks about depression and suicidal thoughts and anxiety, all to find every time how much I relate to these topics in my daily life.

It was a form of extra self therapy I did with myself. Always looking for new ways to get better and see what others in similar circumstances did to better themselves.

I charted daily activities to track habits and feelings, got apps for mental health and self betterment and I even had it for a while..some sort of balance..I meditated and exercised and ate healthy and got off addictive generic ssri pills (that were given to me by a sketchy doctor) that didn't help me and brought me nothing but nasty side effects.. all to be a functional adult..I really tried!

I'm  in college now..And ever since I'm there I fell to a stronger never ending depressive episode ..lost all of my good habits bit by bit.. my thoughts escalated .Even though ""on paper"" everything is fine, two weeks ago I started a draft of a plan of sorts, of the things I'll need to do before I go.

I told my therapist ( she's a psychologist) after months of terrible mood not changing and she told me to meet her more often.

I can't quite afford the treatment. and I pay the same (relatively low) price over the 4 yrs which stayed constant (after a while they're supposed to rise it periodically in my country) and in really bad times she would see me for an even lower price or for free. (which even though somewhat helpful, it made me feel extremely uncomfortable in these conditions). 

She also told me to see a psychiatrist to start medical treatment (more pills) but here's the thing!

**She doesn't believe me to have depression!** 

So, wait, I don't have a mental illness!? I'm not sick!? 

How the hell can that be when I've been struggling with this my entire life?! 

Let's see.. low energy on a daily basis? check! terribly sad moods that continue for more the two weeks in arow? check! 

feeling hopelessness on a daily? check!

 sleeping too much or too little? check! 

feeling uneasy with people around me? feeling like a burden? like the world is better off without me? that I'm never good enough? avoiding people around me? talking of mortality? frequent crying? not wanting to leave the house? daily tasks come at great difficultly or at times I'm unable to do them at all because I'm too sad or stressed to even watch TV let alone leave my bed ?? self harm? feeling like I want to die (or more accurately I don't want to live)?!?! check and check!

She knows all of this of course and yet claims that though I may not have depression, I have a tendency for depressive behavior in my personality or some thing like that

Oh.... excuse me, I guess I don't have depression I guess I just suck as a person?!

I don't know how to take this info or how to process that at all..

She says I cannot be defined as having depression because I am able to somewhat function and go to work (I'm not stupid I need the money even though it takes a terrible emotional toll) and that I still have my survival instinct about me in when push gets to shove (well, knowing hunger and abuse will do that to you) or something among the lines of ""you're too strong and stable to be considered sick"" ....But my strength is weaning! I don't know how long I'll be able to hold it.

She claims that there has been an escalation (no shit) and I may need the pills even though I'm not really sick. ""It's just something to help me cope until I get back on my feet"".

For me there is no getting beck.. I almost had it in my grasp! a balanced life friends..my dream job!

all gone to an illness I don't have that I still need to be medicated for!

quick disclosure- mental illness runs in my family! from my grandma to My mom who is popping meds like cereal! 

I don't want to be medicated if I'm not sick and to have addiction to drugs that don't help and make me fat for no reason!

Plus, if I am sick, I need a name for the daemon  I've been struggling with! Isn't that how exorcism works? I'm not religious but they really had a point there! Name the problem so you can know how treat it no?

I have been fighting with her over this for a month now and It's going nowhere.. No matter what she says to rationalize her claims..I can't hear her. It's like everything she says looses context..I challenged her as a person and as a professional..still she wants to help..I don't get it..

This just feels like a betrayal for some reason..and the feeling is strong and bitter..If I had anyone to help me find the way to balance then, it's gone now and even though she stretches out a hand I don't want to take it..",2.0576714339155693,4.325589621392194,3.3989755690483747,88.47452936606142,79.78098471986416,6.743644787200369,23.225835227763227,7.8622082971491745,1.191296831745849,4626,156,955,81,118,1507,436,1178,0.18600000000000005,0.706,0.10800000000000001,-0.9987,3,4,3,0,3,2,193.0,0,2,2,21,67,65,5,4,57,0,90,32,5,13,12,176,176,86,4,18,38,1,14,10,0,6,26,5,2,8,56,46,3,3,28,6,11,14,40,34,1,8,42,27,126,30,142,115,33,112,1,15,8,0,62,45,3,31,59,645,182,13,0.07867145165731003,0.046606402881468466,0.0,0.085763494648874,0.0,0.0,0.034868747565217316,0.0,0.07877809476714878,0.04073994892427421,0.0,0.0314567657335691,0.06546095001747461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030091722592304856,0.0,0.039010470197190034,0.027504454100576427,0.0,0.032369950735929964,0.07003427129133845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030246745112784707,0.03284368801256141,0.04795738672828175,0.0,0.03347180546708097,0.08863578568523862,0.041280417435745065,0.13915701164636854,0.0858888494824443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322396439120841,0.033884244778189104,0.0,0.04250794534816138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296253432781698,0.0,0.0,0.271038424136135,0.0,0.04082427309995184,0.0,0.0,0.040261782183048274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04561695369481244,0.0,0.0,0.04424739711328479,0.03483977762220065,0.08128863976662759,0.0,0.23382788333184776,0.03558141602482246,0.03314204554658552,0.0,0.07070482798510358,0.0,0.037082221521308086,0.0,0.1790039239675715,0.11240580156656317,0.037768465461060434,0.0,0.07190428156126408,0.10037684488556728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275646611630344,0.0,0.06706619844174627,0.06598588110840913,0.0629207466642317,0.08673555318680658,0.08666547349841221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047416803704054,0.0,0.0,0.04181203713439421,0.04433422184236815,0.0,0.21092726289146588,0.0,0.03945694024518488,0.0,0.0,0.04538814629062314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0390346382828739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12970731718395964,0.0,0.0,0.08330170804421487,0.0,0.0804468894735248,0.16670391869037246,0.19217448715622265,0.039424731146273616,0.03473416657060727,0.06962175907051067,0.06606420548073487,0.0,0.042939591412211264,0.10032548232196592,0.0,0.03722041487713445,0.026256902437544118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04369312379101699,0.11887981633237897,0.11892347932149368,0.0,0.0,0.04606952667736646,0.06279480214343526,0.04180765138639827,0.08674885353205138,0.14583471140387755,0.06067627345927129,0.037990689121737316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037743689822986745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026654905838082582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04259675783393445,0.0,0.0545408789196219,0.10303931563172017,0.0,0.0,0.0371849753382841,0.0,0.03767275194493006,0.0,0.0,0.03763897721221123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04183838634897297,0.0393463706347072,0.0,0.12599736607330894,0.12133103252322835,0.0,0.0,0.04455970932239052,0.0,0.0,0.12512539199750033,0.0,0.0,0.1253819226873871,0.0,0.20517870421161366,0.0,0.04037755729354521,0.0650778377792764,0.04421500393371385,0.03936413361941594,0.0,0.0,0.06056512702517348,0.03890403865644485,0.0,0.11136811680556698,0.041926649948486786,0.06282712291758474,0.0,0.04505894103517962,0.08224448267567966,0.0,0.08605379921980022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872671129500333,0.06323313282052175,0.0,0.0,0.04498383062756568,0.1370154284636155,0.10453163350531468,0.0,0.2318829054495893,0.12491268985895795,0.09174791224086558,0.0,0.0,0.15034788689910838,0.0,0.05341275154559906,0.0,0.07685057686016951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560984197803668,0.06244573647091775,0.06310549313068306,0.0,0.035367541550721616,0.036464611930936586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03791823600017381,0.0,0.08591063066848313,0.03994733898056914,0.0,0.02794297103156735,0.0,0.0,0.02533091776122329
mentalhealth,JustAgamer_,2020/02/16,"I think I have BDD (body dysmorphic disorder) and idk what to do I'm 17 and Currently take Zoloft for my depression, I've been spiraling out of control mentally and trying so hard to accept myself physically, it's just that when I look at myself my face my eyes are uneven, my nose is huge, my lips are misplaced and my face has pores the size of golf balls. I know I'm over exaggerating my dislikes and it isn't healthy but I genuinely can't stop thinking about it, Everytime I take a picture of myself I end up in a crying fit over my face. I'm not sure if this could be the cause of my depression and am considering therapy. Any advice?",2.3194358974358984,4.354251738461542,4.338076923076926,83.25608974358975,77.76923076923076,8.333333333333334,25.448717948717945,9.075114841892004,2.1509487179487183,506,19,104,13,12,173,87,130,0.163,0.767,0.07,-0.8831,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,4,0,12,8,7,2,1,20,21,10,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,7,0,2,4,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,4,19,2,14,18,0,12,0,2,2,0,0,8,0,1,4,67,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20853344263059007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512031463841005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23704092066272506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21922208958577674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393478898660697,0.1703837058603875,0.0,0.2344114896952909,0.0,0.0,0.3676047397039874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24457656812084225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18901035784831965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911657970981943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727986471065364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17920348479666734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21505848503464084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17841318095086148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20112835607810645,0.0,0.3209026883854495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440431743423779,0.0,0.0,0.2734780851095496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14488558728434528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aimhigher17,2020/02/16,"Mental Health poem Mental health Suicide poem

I sit by the river and look to the sky,
imagining the feeling and asking myself why.

What gives you the strength to end it all,
when did you life hit the metal wall.

Our eyes are the window to our soul,
were yours clouded like a deep misty hole.

Why did the system let you so badly down,
depression is not just a temporary frown.

Imagine a time that we can talk  to one another,
whether its a doctor, child or your a brother.

Tears would be shed and a problem halved,
a memory in your heart would be calved.

Too many life's are being destroyed,
families torn apart and left with a void.

If we can learn from you in any way,
to help the thoughts float away.

I don't know your name or who you belong,
but the Mental health system has got it so wrong.

It effects  many families so far and wide,
lets come together and diminish suicide.

Nicola",5.273636363636364,5.837327861271678,5.344792433000528,84.75505517603786,68.07514450867052,8.37183394640042,27.287966368891226,8.296473431620573,1.6522300578034677,692,20,138,9,11,217,118,173,0.151,0.81,0.038,-0.9662,0,0,0,0,0,2,21.0,4,9,0,2,6,7,1,0,17,0,17,8,2,1,1,29,26,15,2,4,7,1,1,1,0,2,6,0,1,1,7,10,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,5,3,16,2,12,13,1,19,1,1,2,0,21,11,0,3,4,89,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674389334673323,0.13375580710496476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924961980974524,0.0,0.11984504937023135,0.0,0.10650569913769316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988002256243304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986561879392598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13056113729661062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297862992837672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405008796329581,0.0,0.06449721637454048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236536852957422,0.0,0.0,0.1020198783884539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4067649387303885,0.0,0.15115698217302695,0.08549951665318317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07010260487326422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859226676338152,0.2608736328135119,0.18019613999419232,0.06231845249282924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711669149351943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586478181039976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38564573820633136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643668094303532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122055890351932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27905575177349645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252638219466292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10126689608905927,0.07438016350280019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124969550404267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23020271941795603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18122725222351116,0.13946477593999485,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,J21690,2020/02/16,I always say I'm fine even when I'm not I dont like to share my emotions and I never really have with family or friends. And I've been trying to change this recently but I'm finding it impossible to do.,-0.07866666666666687,1.9485206888888909,3.391111111111112,86.78000000000004,86.55555555555556,7.155555555555559,20.11111111111111,8.238735603445708,1.1749111111111108,161,5,36,4,5,59,33,45,0.037000000000000005,0.84,0.124,0.3435,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,8,7,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,4,4,4,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565442852800344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32615830441223514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613450059629379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468149137737621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20364034568836245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29065364967176205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28179597938594797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382048031644417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506280200436733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377929315707966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19751564386288392,0.0,0.3044256549880893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451859028307243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093268760451515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mythrowawayiguess222,2020/02/16,"Getting to the root. It would take way more than a reddit post to explain everything, so I'll leave as much as I can out.

I have worked since 15 at many jobs, never lasting more than a couple months. I start off optimistic, but eventually snowball into no-showing. I'm 18 now, and just quit my job. I liked it. Had an amazing boss, good coworkers, and it was the best pay I could get out of HS. No real reason for me to quit. On my way to work, I was hoping a car would hit me so I wouldn't have to go to work.

I've done this at a lot of jobs now, and I have been trying to figure it out. Context (I'll try to keep it short) : I spent Elementary school between schools and short/long term care facilities. I had violent outbursts almost every day. Tried a couple meds, had bad side effects. Eventually I think general aging and realizing the path I was heading down made me slowly calm down. If I told you about what I did as a kid in person you'd think I'm lying, as I'm the most reserved, shy, awkward guy ever. 

I still struggle with... Something. Anxiety, stress, depression. Is it one thing that causes the others? A little bit of all of them? If I had to guess my anxiety is the worst - runs in my dad's side, and schizophrenia in my mom's, great. The depression kicks in harder than the anxiety when I am alone with time to think. So I can't relax. I always have to be doing something, as downtime leads to bad thoughts. 

Back to the point. I think my anxiety is the worst and the cause of the other stuff. I think as a kid, I interpreted it as fear. Thus the outbursts. But what the hell can I do to work on it? I can't afford therapy - especially not without a job now - and I don't see my doctor until May. It's a new doctor, so I doubt they'd want to put me on meds after first meet. they'd probably want me to see a therapist because what, do I need antidepressants? Anti anxiety?

It fucking sucks. I'm always anxious about something. And I'm just terribly socially as well. Can't make eye contact. Can't hold a conversation. Definitely can't start a conversation. One of the only things keeping me going is a drive to want a relationship. But that's hard with no friends, and never messaging anyone first on apps. Oh, on that note, friends as well. What the fuck are they and how do they work. I never had one through school, everyone had their own cliques. I can't hold a job so coworkers can't really be ""friends"". So how? Meetup.com? That would never go over well for me. 

I know I would never commit suicide - I'm far too logical and know the negatives always outweigh the benefits. But if I didn't think that way, I might have tried by now. I'm always going to be struggling. All my energy will be to counter my anxiety, holding conversations, and figuring out what thoughts of mine are anxiety and what ones are mine. But god I just want to know why, regardless of if I can change it, I'm like this and what it is. Just really bad anxiety? I have no clue and I hate that I don't.",1.8887788664412284,3.8843681729818766,3.7845746986907134,86.8963215699876,78.9670510708402,7.225052747189226,23.99343911673748,8.20500826718156,1.436488852278968,2319,81,489,45,57,783,268,607,0.209,0.677,0.114,-0.9965,6,1,3,0,1,2,98.0,0,2,6,12,26,37,6,6,35,0,60,6,2,12,9,104,110,44,1,17,15,2,1,2,3,8,2,0,0,4,32,24,0,5,19,1,2,9,22,20,3,6,18,4,64,17,73,75,13,65,1,2,3,2,27,26,4,12,28,337,96,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057775080612403475,0.05975655644382709,0.0,0.0,0.19203367004002464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3531035785874809,0.06518103989100531,0.0,0.04034299274583657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044365331309908385,0.14452342835732002,0.03517147618733873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06054930503494217,0.0,0.06299003824885731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588258038555997,0.11854115683406705,0.061035637708656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04606625554142189,0.1276809776086474,0.0,0.0372097077513556,0.0,0.09938845849096407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811038172985425,0.0,0.059043929529688115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052190121764529834,0.04861210108656777,0.05513183145121455,0.0518542260840377,0.0,0.0,0.06492501898856087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815385562063167,0.0,0.0,0.13372937499727672,0.1066796524670134,0.06028846603475691,0.0,0.1311618424823055,0.04839339681401627,0.0,0.06361100242575121,0.06355960667090027,0.05712897199642655,0.0,0.0,0.05168506234464055,0.05696371371369186,0.059213633760520724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05730601002974979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862762015424499,0.10256725742930976,0.0,0.0,0.09512607189183844,0.04703064942549347,0.0,0.06109265413984576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056375552213674886,0.05782742085425865,0.0,0.05105991398453403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04905181527735177,0.0,0.05459417307081885,0.03851310848390119,0.058495569896223086,0.0,0.0,0.12817643060270706,0.0,0.0,0.06120726088866287,0.0,0.06757387635300015,0.04605309085730516,0.0,0.04241383784550787,0.0427814977366484,0.2224969136871977,0.05572399619505482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15638756820033534,0.043881069254014284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050378681065810026,0.0,0.0,0.0545421910517056,0.0,0.05525765219234662,0.0,0.062206983956678924,0.0,0.0,0.05800128993387841,0.0,0.1227354457428588,0.0,0.06567166906110909,0.07392418416162623,0.059321991352507014,0.0,0.061944845503530875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17517693698293546,0.09195387007027146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04772744675905155,0.0,0.0,0.0588146926226941,0.0,0.13325360710446002,0.0,0.0,0.08167628253909444,0.0,0.0460767945954758,0.0,0.06609156919348683,0.12063459088615355,0.06604911184094736,0.06311101076540399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043380865477848016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598139872369944,0.06699051259555187,0.07666247286338572,0.22181894606679348,0.0,0.09160973932468017,0.03364350865176158,0.0,0.0,0.05513183145121455,0.0,0.156689548555273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612443426606444,0.13739126856921655,0.0,0.0,0.1556292446672046,0.0,0.052062450643211335,0.0,0.0,0.05561772338022413,0.0,0.2100200411889059,0.0,0.0,0.16394480304919298,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tankiekiller,2020/02/16,Help me please Therapists I have a question is their a disorder to lack of feeling/ emotions for others I'm not a sociopath becuase I am a very emotional person but I keep getting in arguments with my mother and she always says how do you thing the family feels and that but then people that I can really have bonds and emotions towards are my very close freind I cannot feel a genuine attachment to my mother or father or my sibling for that matter although I feel as if I'm begging for my older brothers attention j love him soo much but j feel as of i need his approval of some sort for him to love me back if this is something I'll need to set up with a therapist office i will i must thought I'll ask here first thanks if you can help,3.1693137254901984,4.629421045751633,4.498839869281046,85.51727941176473,73.83660130718955,7.452941176470588,27.782679738562088,8.07648339933343,1.8014405228758168,592,23,119,9,12,196,94,153,0.06,0.753,0.187,0.9677,0,0,1,0,0,0,1.0,0,2,1,2,3,3,0,0,7,0,12,2,0,1,1,32,28,16,0,7,9,4,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,6,6,0,1,8,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,6,23,3,18,25,3,9,0,0,0,2,19,4,0,8,4,87,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12125015091866576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622789729855098,0.0,0.0,0.11204916545649136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700696986035565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4917438787226655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737121000100816,0.0,0.36840034300869495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394878257307705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761323324586313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19534518252197808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952203059000447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630347583857366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712046983710266,0.21609806472017207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102343150344574,0.12723649308039878,0.0,0.15995605908534502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16323899233954994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335153032557507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158818552083658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218185483483073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415877555161335,0.0,0.33838273301287164,0.09680944391206246,0.0,0.0,0.11568486626769126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404674065620376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rosecourt94,2020/02/16,"Birthday Adulting means crying when your birthday comes. 


Right? 


Or is that just me.",3.444047619047616,5.998351500000003,1.4014285714285712,93.32690476190477,105.42857142857143,1.866666666666667,26.095238095238088,3.1291,0.3488380952380949,67,3,10,0,3,18,13,14,0.193,0.807,0.0,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4381918190820606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5587726227142177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5541130770039847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43441890346508333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nehuenn,2020/02/16,"My last year (sorry if I write badly, I'm from Argentina and I'm learning). I am 18 years old and this year I suffered from depression and anxiety. I was far from almost all the people I know, although sometimes I left my house to join someone, mostly as a necessity imposed by myself. I know that sometimes I have to see and talk to people, although I love being alone and I always enjoy it. but in a moment things got worse. my mother once in response to my concern about becoming ""crazy"" (I was smoking a lot of weed and at some point I couldn't stop thinking, my thoughts became loud and unbearable, to the point that I thought I could become schizophrenic) he told me ""If you think too much about going crazy, you will become one."" That phrase, that phrase stuck in my head. I had stopped reading books (a true passion, especially dostoevsky) and, in general, I stopped enjoying anything. My anxiety reached the point of not seeing a future. Even if the world right now feels increasingly dead, I still want to experience and live the last moments. The problem is that this possibility did not exist for me, since the problem was internal and had no solution. For those who think, why didn't you go to therapy? My family barely has any money, and with inflation in my country, prices rose very high. As you may know, in a few countries mental health is taken seriously. continuous. At this point I am almost certain that I am schizophrenic since there is no obvious distinction between thoughts and voices, because in reality there is no such distinction. (Among all this, I also thought it was bipolar. And I know that it is silly to analyze and give these answers without any psychiatrist involved, but understand the anxiety and fear that was happening). It seems as if your thoughts turn against you, especially with anxiety attacks. Over time the only solution I found, after realizing that I didn't want to talk to my friends and I didn't want to see anyone I know, partly because even before the problem I didn't consider them as friends and sincerely preferred to be alone, it was going out from my house. You don't need to look for friends because you need help and you feel lonely, you have to experience a little more simple things and stop thinking constantly about yourself, because that way you will live asking yourself the same questions that have no way out. The only way to achieve this is to leave your home, you have to run and eat well. Reading is very important, because it is a great way to calm anxiety, and like music is something that anyone can be entertain.it is important that Culture enters our life. and believe me that I know how much it costs to leave home, at least I was lucky enough to know since I was little what my passion is and the only thing that saved me during the journey, the only thing that made me leave again.


 In time I calmed down, since I discovered that the solution was to give myself to the only things that I was passionate about, books, photography, and especially cinema. I will improve partly because I read again and because I started working on short films filming the streets of my neighborhood and taking pictures. I also go to film festivals and im constantly meeting new people in the streets. The anxiety diminished and with the help of people I could at least calm all these thoughts and the paranoia in which I constantly lived. All this puts you to think about the dangers of this loop, and the fear of how much one can dissapear from reality in dark times.",7.907591458226987,7.870312738131702,7.6030028075548755,72.86016866598605,62.50689127105665,10.808388633656628,37.434447847541264,10.380263240014207,3.9303949634167097,2810,126,489,58,36,892,281,653,0.128,0.716,0.156,0.9786,0,4,1,0,0,0,78.0,1,14,1,2,20,34,2,2,32,0,49,11,1,3,9,110,100,46,1,16,9,1,2,1,3,4,5,2,2,0,43,35,1,4,28,9,3,9,13,12,1,2,29,8,74,22,76,61,19,75,0,3,4,4,36,35,0,13,28,353,117,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448039895005803,0.10806369789456166,0.0,0.08343983040555494,0.043409187501242064,0.0,0.0,0.070954072257698,0.0,0.23945706157262095,0.0,0.0,0.07295622839891618,0.0,0.042931037833299115,0.0,0.04877142248424527,0.05935031620401405,0.0,0.0,0.04355933761392047,0.22261422029489072,0.1728512794448465,0.04439238596866521,0.05877714025084151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16913002662671173,0.0,0.0833061712088688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044933497643350265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05338240331026749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053905019777569535,0.0,0.0689149005143857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206352614646376,0.049180743834342455,0.1174103404765936,0.052756914342857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05720114330422923,0.12091803510229787,0.0,0.0,0.10009144004849108,0.11859647346501435,0.0,0.04172469982388985,0.0575170371084586,0.0,0.0,0.046133299861426114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05354093852405325,0.055453718874880334,0.0,0.0,0.06993620701758227,0.05511992110579445,0.10466048640426448,0.0,0.0,0.12039315360608173,0.0,0.0,0.056351991936734264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20069687731352187,0.08505018016021526,0.0,0.16571984348072027,0.056682293881944276,0.0,0.0368488473494016,0.02548737329260451,0.10457505099194543,0.13819982285258925,0.0,0.04380922492063213,0.0,0.0,0.044352627249316295,0.04708499354268676,0.04936402444034926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05257456657532696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505171396031867,0.077366018425709,0.0,0.0503856099536184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0547430945833726,0.05555879476436382,0.07070278112642132,0.19838620619034955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298892834672597,0.0,0.1446709978313722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972680892969306,0.05881325135341595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497574433664983,0.0,0.0524447378322533,0.05844175840024032,0.0,0.1565507967653472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044552451826667006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12471696613973912,0.047493136262314516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726205355456592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04420303205600466,0.04016261533586776,0.10319390159430106,0.05839946293471111,0.03692582725107532,0.0,0.04166261501192667,0.17446408884180553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03922495722966858,0.08386370555771737,0.0,0.0,0.059660348275264674,0.0,0.17329542564811598,0.16714048494958236,0.0,0.2485004437267343,0.0912613319295259,0.0,0.0,0.04985017488347409,0.0,0.0,0.05674541461415907,0.0,0.05431026970074401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609057110692593,0.09231273488640557,0.16563882329209095,0.0,0.0,0.04690662882904715,0.0,0.04707484226644803,0.0,0.0,0.05028951812671515,0.0,0.037980003590360495,0.0,0.05316515822401247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078630619157997
mentalhealth,StrangerBoi,2020/02/16,"I feel lost. I hate myself for not being happy. There is not a single thing in my life that could be better. I have a loving family, good friends and I'm in love with the person who feels the same way for me. But I'm not happy. I lack motivation to do anything, I can't concentrate on my studies and I'm in general very tired. I want to do great and I know I have the means to do so but I just can't help myself. What can I do? Please tll me anything that I can try?",-0.9286858974358978,0.9689983750000016,1.9726923076923093,96.35564102564103,89.28846153846153,5.005128205128205,15.397435897435901,6.42735559955562,-0.5756448717948719,357,7,88,4,12,125,63,104,0.139,0.672,0.18899999999999997,0.6286,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,3,10,1,0,5,0,14,4,0,1,0,20,26,6,0,3,6,0,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,2,17,8,10,22,3,5,0,1,0,2,6,4,0,0,0,65,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31792341940649604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708423706677757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542298075300878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821026352715073,0.0,0.1953442014416797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924196699254386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620210757013162,0.0,0.21296961399647413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4112641964771866,0.0,0.19071449370053456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947717547433968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616068520249353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364410475702852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108668907323226,0.0,0.3486853080037317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21041777867018435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866780668580758,0.0,0.21204166351066195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12833296624108045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22201946339733197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114913851597035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15938473728057945,0.11393613964412308,0.1533286397942733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoeLuna,2020/02/16,"Help Listen I’m having a bad breakdown tonight and I haven’t had one in a long time. I’m scared that my schizoaffective disorder is coming back... I can’t afford my medication anymore and I thought it was gone! The words are repeating over and over and the radio won’t turn off. My family hates me.. they love me but when I’m not normal they are so mean to me. I’m keeping my suicidal voices to myself because of this, I mean I’ve been bedridden for a week now because of constant seizures and they’re so mad that I can’t do housework and I’m mad at myself because I’m worthless and pathetic. I can’t even get a job! I can’t make money to help my family... and now it’s happening again and I’m so scared. I am having trouble seeing and my mirror is disgusting to look into. I can’t drive... I can’t think straight right now I’m sorry if you’re reading this please don’t mind me it just helps me to post my thoughts into the public but I never hope for someone to see it. It’s embarrassing. I haven’t had friends since I was seven and I’m twenty-two now... I don’t deserve friends. Talking is so scary and hard. I just want to help people smile and feel happy despite how scary things can be but I can’t. I haven’t even lived yet because my life was stolen since I became mental at eight years old. I need medical treatment because my health is going downhill and my seizures are getting worse but Medicaid nor Medicare will take me since I’m not disabled. I’m sorry for complaining I’m just scared and no one wants me. I don’t want to hurt myself or put my hand in a toaster anymore. I don’t want to see the disappointment on my parent’s face when I say I need to be put in a hospital for my suicidal thoughts... and then they say they can’t take me there anyways because of money and it wouldn’t help anyways and I’m just exaggerating. I wish they didn’t leave the blades out. I still love them so much, they mean the world to me but they don’t understand and I don’t blame them. I want to live life one day... but my brain is going to end me. I’m sorry if someone read this... if someone is here, I want you to know that you’re worthwhile. That you’re amazing and beautiful and the world is lucky to have you. You’re the only you out there and we’re glad to have you here. You’re loved and special. Thank you. I will delete later when my episode ends.",1.0002854206198606,3.0878513830645176,2.643666982922202,93.4309661606578,82.54838709677419,5.503099304237825,22.023877292852625,6.7065604860727355,0.4234205091714114,1850,61,410,20,51,607,204,496,0.196,0.634,0.17,-0.9520000000000001,3,0,0,0,0,2,54.0,0,5,9,0,29,26,4,4,14,0,47,11,3,2,1,73,103,44,2,15,16,1,3,0,2,4,5,4,1,0,14,28,0,1,10,3,2,7,25,14,0,5,11,11,71,12,36,86,1,50,0,3,4,3,31,17,0,6,25,256,85,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14443819786834586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599503586332714,0.06080269071232922,0.266346899120712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129258333600449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272904719108048,0.0,0.07869388641227938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04696367317639629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345944593748371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899600205913594,0.0,0.0,0.09619547979783892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729876165087435,0.0,0.036820605195571884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252301332084576,0.0,0.07609218094596408,0.0,0.0827719737106583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.064395578919846,0.07751956033402688,0.06523352433390008,0.07189589479283577,0.0,0.07740556909938594,0.0,0.0,0.2440526990201839,0.0,0.0,0.07232791894159421,0.0,0.0,0.07795663977212904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226384070124804,0.06472686091351955,0.0,0.0,0.04002064712731605,0.0,0.0,0.07710717487153078,0.0,0.0,0.10287158580554208,0.0,0.0,0.12860497191030607,0.06444450273053279,0.06115149814272665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19717202715128704,0.0,0.04860874081385756,0.0,0.0,0.23797102439789106,0.0,0.14671946913374725,0.07338667863013577,0.0,0.07352868983968226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05353198772867363,0.1079920482647433,0.05616422685707188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134935033393272,0.0,0.0,0.07641363783100494,0.0,0.14803666339352728,0.05538383179054289,0.0,0.0,0.08085936529421163,0.0,0.0,0.0504850763236461,0.0,0.0,0.07993584984368553,0.0,0.0,0.06974261489494772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641091203758955,0.0,0.0,0.14568188587346154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218893806197553,0.0,0.11582074015215985,0.21872028443949285,0.0,0.1740872918221607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807154379803716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18510359205665575,0.0,0.0,0.2445522368171145,0.0,0.0,0.058155133516710665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15930922667945335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950501423041382,0.058530951459948015,0.0,0.06704401070536879,0.0,0.0,0.04837919373767766,0.04666090794112748,0.0,0.17343578265254175,0.04246264860199097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920859414136222,0.07113576669748294,0.07580947535029135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25771111204012576,0.0,0.05841280339172696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374082810972253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742110612612627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04689448875248253
mentalhealth,Theonlylucy,2020/02/16,"Accidentally supportive I was writing an essay for an upcoming project I'm working on. It involves some of my trauma. When I was writing about the trauma, google docs suggested I change a word to past tense. I don't know why that felt so good to see.",3.823367346938774,5.663302714285718,5.0813775510204096,80.45022959183675,72.87755102040815,8.16530612244898,30.617346938775512,8.841846274778883,2.5991183673469402,199,9,38,4,4,66,40,49,0.19899999999999998,0.688,0.114,-0.536,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,8,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,5,2,6,5,1,3,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,2,23,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3935671751306928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3572150971001073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31204806231376464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044625118549965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3551526401473561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29646634527387816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4221846370901952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357066854586813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708483025149981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,white_wolf_178,2020/02/16,"I self harmed for the first time in years There was a miscommunication between me and my boyfriend during sex, which was primarily my fault, and he is now self conscious about his sexual ability and is anxious about having sex. I felt so fucking terrible for making him feel like that. When I got home from his house, I couldn’t find a razor, so I took my nail and scraped my thigh until I saw blood and bruising. I repeatedly hit my forearm until my shoulder began cramping, and since I don’t see bruising I am continuing to do it. I feel so horrible. I deserve this. He’s the only good person in my life right now and I hurt him.",5.14714,5.730936464000004,6.174150000000001,78.62682500000003,68.36,8.81,30.825,8.841846274778883,2.3836600000000003,498,19,98,8,8,166,82,125,0.154,0.785,0.061,-0.9129,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,9,7,1,0,4,0,9,10,4,1,0,14,20,13,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,1,3,4,7,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,7,5,24,2,11,11,0,15,0,1,2,3,9,3,1,0,12,67,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414804297745104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161602207953912,0.15270542756887912,0.2052367257373766,0.0,0.19536667870908406,0.1818184803351548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19761151685372785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792861586810875,0.17095807135230234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21441202666510709,0.0,0.0,0.24664265328917606,0.2288273695680149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15098030425619027,0.10442908397977384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268201311602854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625690458474364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866411701253569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18254418295281294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703337358619131,0.0,0.4459826993696124,0.0,0.0,0.1768189702816672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464129050311387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374878238214903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765014166636616
mentalhealth,ImNot_SmallMouse,2020/02/16,"I met a person online who needs professional help This week, I met a person online who needs professional help for their mental state. Yesterday, they told me deeply personal issues that they have and essentially poured their heart out to me. It was to the pint where I had to drop everything I was doing to stay with them and get them to a good mental state. It caused me great distress, and they had caused me to stay up much later than I was comfortable with even after I mentioned that I needed to sleep multiple times.

I won't share exactly what they said on here, as their issues aren't for me to share. What I will say is that I told them I could help them get professional help and that I am not a professional. They declined. Today, something similar happened, and again I had to drop what I was doing. Yet again, I had to stay up incredibly later just to help this person get to a mentally better place, all the while they would not seem professional help even when I asked them to. Keep in mind, I haven't known this person for a full week yet. I want to help, but at the same time, I know this isn't something I am qualified or able to do. I can't keep staying up every night in distress trying to help them, it's just not something I am able to do right now. 

Tomorrow I'm going to explain to them that I can't continue doing this, and then offer them resources that can help them cope with their issues. How should I go about this? What resources should I offer? I need to make it clear that I cannot be their only mental support, and that what we've been doing the past two nights is something I cannot do anymore. I feel selfish saying this, but I also would rather not talk to this person after tomorrow due to the past two nights. How do I do this?",6.897401129943503,5.782308570621471,6.98,80.0479096045198,64.98870056497175,10.0135593220339,29.553672316384183,8.998388855275968,2.083068926553672,1390,35,287,19,18,447,150,354,0.05,0.8390000000000001,0.111,0.9464,0,0,4,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,20,1,17,10,0,2,11,0,40,2,2,5,3,48,66,17,0,11,10,0,1,0,0,6,0,3,0,6,28,11,0,2,5,0,0,2,12,3,0,2,14,4,56,7,41,44,4,49,0,0,0,0,52,12,0,2,27,214,84,6,0.14447911054116552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05776994625045258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164222748086226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06753423255484924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389001615163978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484198451284308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05767740669744885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542708989749583,0.0,0.06086494098193685,0.0,0.06492425424378627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03652648970057922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322655815356973,0.0,0.08211080804295337,0.060591111578479476,0.0,0.07964436471385085,0.0,0.0,0.06388120015098135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560422081553813,0.435785860380602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261979818304246,0.0,0.1284196718631243,0.0,0.0,0.0397009703491301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04822046409245384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291201923152066,0.0,0.07294135764094478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053104385113639664,0.21425885955622384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033757869392835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494143702231065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792165916366145,0.0,0.3784607595163923,0.07547495985218561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169218549085359,0.06871635975402704,0.11489558766921355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576417799038749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722917258134559,0.0,0.0,0.2224541558105773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30799101655907074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197659124359671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580634181407753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424693122678308,0.0,0.06847465164702342,0.1380559816383441,0.0,0.049045916099778514,0.0,0.14113509736286994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04260876136092829,0.0,0.11589242763051955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026338148202526,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SugarlessWater,2020/02/16,"I have a bad habit of isolating myself Ever since high school I've always kept to myself and never really went out of my way to really talk to anyone I wasn't already friends with.  If I'm walking in someone's direction I'll stare right through them like they aren't there.

After graduating, it continued to get worse.  I stopped checking social media and hardly ever touched my phone.  Acceptance from others isn't my problem, I'm generally a likeable guy.  I just don't really.. care. About anyone or anything.

I got married to a girl I'd been with since middle school, and I assumed I had all I needed.  After some months she said she hasn't really liked me for a while and just kind of split.

That's when things got exponentially worse.  I've changed my number countless times just so no one would have it, but my mother keeps giving it out.  I've started ghosting family, and I can see how much it concerns them, but I don't have it in me to care.  I don't know where it comes from.

Recently I put a post on Reddit and it hit r/all , I had fun talking to people for a while and even met a really cute girl and some awesome people online.  But I can *feel* another isolation episode coming. I know it's only a matter of time before I delete whatever social media I have and change my number.

  I go weeks without seeing family and literal years without speaking to snyone else.  I'm content with only seeing people at my job and they love me, and honeslty that's all I need.

I wouldn't know what this would be considered.  I was diagnosed bipolar as a child, but I haven't been evaluated since.  I'm not a harm to anyone or myself, my apathy just won't let me care about other people I guess.

Does anyone else have this problem?",3.0852323838080977,4.890692347826088,4.680379810094955,82.69565217391306,74.79710144927536,7.425287356321839,24.36031984007996,8.216663640201805,1.5468280859570216,1360,43,261,23,29,457,180,345,0.085,0.79,0.124,0.9423,1,1,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,4,0,14,15,0,0,10,0,26,3,0,1,5,60,58,25,1,8,14,1,3,2,1,4,2,2,0,4,16,19,0,3,6,0,1,6,15,4,0,1,12,9,44,11,34,39,5,35,0,0,4,1,22,10,0,7,19,172,60,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611292965665384,0.0,0.0724710963413038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132806159456257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435990241395205,0.08924044896189104,0.07167283144288651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07272177007900651,0.0,0.0,0.07411253390226266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664014387280265,0.0,0.18427266758855326,0.15005149586841868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08840090821240733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621855653979964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14551556057916365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05752628282188546,0.15756717420120325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16421327510235628,0.0,0.04403850477392262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729038310188021,0.0,0.04550422047720741,0.08355070449644421,0.049498832787275814,0.0,0.13931773040730525,0.0,0.09594639059915136,0.08623902740742817,0.0,0.0,0.07802117476178101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202201982400147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642963571078446,0.07741519071185338,0.0,0.0906973907093929,0.1435975413937848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906186475811477,0.0,0.08510170273618985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860780861572411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951943341267093,0.0,0.06402579981032673,0.12916160144006875,0.06717403365402283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05901870499723574,0.13248131733583085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24152642390116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341417699908882,0.0,0.0,0.16667878746068532,0.0,0.08755583476255803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789805908106057,0.0,0.08599708602873063,0.0,0.0,0.07437976185293252,0.08284852341084165,0.0,0.0,0.17629220506617488,0.208213417223014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21614087101363585,0.0,0.0,0.17756741323352512,0.0737964099101554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06164720738250285,0.0,0.0,0.07281640430490954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400094089491578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05786290972293603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101573102519079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913298665356181,0.06986339598063245,0.0,0.0,0.08073914000911138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679154447668313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775171352167245,0.12374142111597193,0.0,0.0,0.05608715977990561
mentalhealth,3m0lga,2020/02/16,"My roommate and best friend told me what it's like to be admitted to our hospital's mental health ward today Despite coming close to ending my life twice in the past, I was never admitted to the ward. I was kept in a room just off the ER. It was just a waiting room. I didn't realize that I was lucky they didn't want to keep me there, until I heard about what it's like on the ward.

My best friend admitted themselves after a particularly hard week about two months ago. They also have bpd so everything is just intensified. 

We were watching Horse Girl and I commented on how the mental health ward looked in the movie. They said they wished they got to stay in a room half as nice when they were admitted. They told me the rooms were cells. No windows. Dark. Doors locked from the outside. Yelling and strange noises could be heard in the hallway. No one seemed to care much. 

How can an environment like that help mental health? it only makes it worse. It makes it so you lie to your counsellors and nurses so you can get the hell out of there. I'm really angry and surprised at how fragile, broken people are treated like prisoners. How is this okay? Our hospital boasted about how great the mental health ward was when it first opened. It's a joke and part of the reason no one wants to find proper help.",2.89245460440986,5.115737108949418,3.37068579766537,89.96915450713362,76.7431906614786,6.617963683527888,21.603274967574574,7.645422480735847,0.7731765239948123,1035,28,211,15,24,322,141,257,0.099,0.71,0.191,0.9737,0,0,0,0,1,0,24.0,3,3,7,3,19,17,1,0,18,1,19,5,0,8,1,38,43,19,0,4,3,0,2,4,2,0,5,4,6,1,14,11,0,3,8,1,0,1,6,1,1,6,17,8,25,16,28,23,4,30,1,0,2,0,29,16,1,2,16,140,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729056400318133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777047337908339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230360731316698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13823169765113505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190182272652338,0.0,0.0,0.09454361041003806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762987708463274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720973224718092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864008708016483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031344105856664,0.09335695079106984,0.0,0.0,0.16959179853575468,0.0,0.057342091365515574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778053927825724,0.12100450228229685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983182940992437,0.0,0.0,0.4666547506266099,0.0,0.0,0.14713198640111605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755466399213306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752270731162089,0.2144816266484047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216596896147647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14652369388072986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4424260762360682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760483446639848,0.0,0.08068203836857105,0.0,0.08464928164429432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487447071385847,0.0834730902235784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885321050373625,0.10477289749882987,0.07608981167726901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703114144565125,0.11284569908143617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044014719755966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991619186520163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169834796223433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403424236317327,0.20974987251466545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10721400234854014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947185855191184,0.0,0.08803827850283119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621202748549515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118490074084519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yo_97,2020/02/16,"You are FUCKING amazing Even when you think you dont matter, you do matter! You being alive today, reading this message, have made it through another day and I say Good. Fucking. JOB. If you still feel like shit, that's okay, you are allowed to feel whatever you want but just know YOU CAN DO THIS. This world is fucking tough by default but know that you are doing your best and your best is still really fucking cool. 

Bless you all. 

Just remember when u feel at your lowest, keep thinking about what keeps you going and focus on that no matter how small you think it matters. Because its strong enough to keep you alive and that's great.

I've been stuck in a very dark hole for so long and I now feel like I can see the surface finally. it feels like a huge lock has been put on my soul for the whole 22 years of my life so far and I feel so light and free. 

You can do this. I want you to be able to do this. Believe It. And if u cant,
""BELIEVE IN THE ME THAT BELIEVES IN YOU"" (sorry I'm a weeb and if u get this, u are great xD)",1.2505299539170522,3.0136473594470097,2.3991036866359465,97.18722695852536,80.01382488479263,5.261658986175116,20.52741935483871,5.985473137389443,-0.16272331797234996,795,21,186,5,20,253,118,217,0.064,0.672,0.264,0.9951,3,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,20,0,3,13,20,5,0,6,2,22,6,1,3,1,41,48,20,0,5,7,0,6,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,17,9,0,3,12,1,1,2,3,6,0,0,4,10,28,15,16,42,5,23,2,0,1,4,22,11,5,3,13,121,45,2,0.1064713164691164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164445872296752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490392628854258,0.0,0.0,0.3598701405418239,0.22347015575223853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866519097033474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12478358994481632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001333148951,0.0,0.07032330037295048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32301058027138524,0.2281893892785352,0.0,0.11663412291508313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3937240656790459,0.05562686841358366,0.0,0.06051010278184975,0.08930308875689992,0.0,0.2347700045679347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565635280195518,0.2839097944177133,0.0,0.0,0.1170277021318971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520383955304526,0.1560495214586456,0.0,0.0,0.094223764618231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10074573401181074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703308062639708,0.0,0.0,0.1065001291194504,0.0,0.06820825168398875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061124621679058,0.0,0.0,0.08467026430196943,0.0,0.0,0.0848438543380727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929127632161778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918592185210775,0.0,0.0,0.17005626173368532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046675614102326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092235864845628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784998666532823,0.12559908206034714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887142252785272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856403700687946
mentalhealth,gluenuggets,2020/02/16,"I think I’m losing my memories I think I spend a good chunk of my day accidentally thinking about embarrassing or upsetting moments, so I’ve coped by imagining me crumpling up the memory and throwing it away or shoving the memory into the deepest parts of my brain. Placebo or not I believe it works and I tend to not think about it for a while or forever but in that process I feel like I’m losing memories of good ones or even every single moment I had with someone I don’t talk to anymore. I ended a relationship and a friendship in the past year and I’ve almost completely erased every single memory I have of them. I know we knew each other but otherwise I can hardly remember anything. I know I’ll never stop coping by “erasing” my bad memories or feelings but I’m afraid I might lose more important memories I have. For now I’m thinking of just getting a diary to write important and meaningful memories into in case I forget those too. But otherwise, I’m not too sure. I’m afraid of the thought of possibly losing memories but I’m also not keen on trying to remember the memories I did want to erase...",4.5333390410958865,5.906004488584479,6.39744006849315,73.5750642123288,70.32420091324201,10.0412100456621,31.95234018264841,10.270032843473604,3.6322257990867577,889,40,158,25,16,309,117,219,0.135,0.752,0.113,-0.612,0,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,1,0,1,5,9,14,0,4,11,0,7,1,1,0,2,49,28,19,0,1,16,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,1,15,0,1,1,6,9,0,1,4,3,24,5,27,23,5,19,0,4,0,0,5,8,0,8,11,110,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207314147711062,0.0,0.0,0.09748969495026767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12089986846079552,0.0,0.0,0.10031980558743073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453647486705025,0.0,0.10178799538725126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734844486745645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608952170837213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278181024330357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862050334687035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797420565391777,0.0,0.0,0.08051901107685171,0.0,0.20542530899268693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328058340492795,0.0870910204038419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06369184054516801,0.0,0.0,0.20450110716304565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920552357474443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399477547673827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05955803685847837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5455349807439756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293250054987216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402287953511466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260794072385214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201436416805848,0.11637487440794365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743282807766166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308834502483909,0.2761957478849537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329215891430928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192045404631896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489674285173013,0.0,0.0,0.097984943551331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3905682648772449,0.0,0.09678124678256232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276745452375024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719044315754943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875039525458607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850468373856516
mentalhealth,OrnellBryant,2020/02/16,"Teetering between neutral and sad My brain has the tendency to exaggerate the overall negativity of a certain situation and always moves towards how horribly anything can go as opposed to how it can end positively.

It's been like this for several years. I switch between two moods. Its either I think so highly of myself (to the point where people find me arrogant) or I think of myself as trash. I've been prescribed pills once by my therapist at my country's mental institution, fluvoxamine, if I recall correctly. I never took the pills because the general opinion towards the idea was negative. My mother was convinced me I didnt need them and so I threw them away. Now I'm beginning it question if I should've done what the doctor told me to.

I'm 23. I'm on my first year of university and I hate that. I know I should be grateful that I even have the opportunity to get a degree but I'm still sad that i didn't get to go overseas like all my friends have and I know that I shouldn't have this mindset because comparison is the death of joy. 

I was born into a religion I never truly believed in and that has constantly been the source of contention between me and my very pious mother who currently hates me because I confessed to my lack of faith. To make the situation worse, she despises my current girlfriend because of her faith, race and what she did to me once 4 years ago (which was leaving me in the 2nd week of my mandatory national service amidst my parent's legitimate divorce and dire financial straits).

That aside, I was always able to keep my head on straight (mostly) but what has pushed me to the edge was the suicide of my closest friend on the 3rd of October. She was the only person in the world who I'd truly take a bullet for. On that day, at 11.51PM she called me to let me know that she loved me and gave me an address. Upon arrival, all I found was her corpse. 

This seems like it's all over the place but I just want to know if I'm depressed, do I have a problem, do I have a right to be sad? 

I'm in no way craving death but I really dont mind it and sometimes i even fancy the idea. I have constant dreams and daydreams about the different ways I do myself in and as the days pass I'm beginning to think to myself, ""maybe my friend had the right idea.""

In the past few years, it just feels like I'm not doing anything right. I'm insecure, I'm furious and I feel alone. Should I seek professional help?",4.5991919191919175,5.4918149012345685,5.692731013842124,80.4794107744108,69.74074074074075,8.771567527123082,30.98241676019454,9.0124134603493,2.52569218106996,1926,79,381,35,33,640,231,486,0.168,0.713,0.11900000000000001,-0.9852,4,1,0,0,1,1,44.0,0,0,2,2,13,25,4,1,30,0,39,6,2,3,7,67,78,29,3,10,12,3,2,4,4,3,3,0,1,1,24,15,0,2,17,1,0,7,10,10,0,2,21,2,68,14,55,51,7,60,4,4,0,1,27,29,0,8,26,264,92,4,0.08668560704369087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684156033399506,0.0,0.0,0.0897801458860337,0.0,0.0,0.14425873859909194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266973700911628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144398133323688,0.0,0.0,0.21137096586847415,0.0,0.0,0.0976649944301042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676980611225652,0.08851569682350227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18735269117627965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181009044367317,0.0,0.07466218632506665,0.0,0.0,0.09056800926969667,0.0,0.08872639199289774,0.0,0.0887094726056238,0.10159488585449224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677771818939197,0.0,0.0,0.11451005180185342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766169506470409,0.061928214992616026,0.0,0.0,0.07922907439574974,0.07373473306800057,0.0,0.09504629382037956,0.20091925490702986,0.0,0.09057930372767993,0.0,0.09853085630705552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116818075797327,0.08896444162506441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05810353514721225,0.09158810321174356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935724968319193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705015050348547,0.0,0.0,0.19056057042695312,0.0,0.0,0.0917875414457044,0.0,0.08864190633173892,0.0,0.16940083576962173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823714478899231,0.0,0.0578633158264339,0.0,0.08708734361288828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735870322767084,0.0,0.08752775182533662,0.0,0.0,0.09213308164917257,0.0,0.06427627923355825,0.13371456830051245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18463468477873796,0.0,0.06592831035978344,0.0,0.0,0.09625410807206324,0.0,0.08275122060409226,0.06009688518826966,0.0756905284508177,0.09056800926969667,0.0,0.08194591792064175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294641879386265,0.0,0.0,0.09710771882208492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553301958401608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22208710431960607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789153209688646,0.0,0.0979300618823117,0.0,0.0,0.19487650860333536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573428191144296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922723776145502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481998446244684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517678833995008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064867107030427,0.0,0.1666339103465875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283181236032514,0.09631089900266944,0.0,0.0,0.08467924217034083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152470426223258,0.05112941698100285,0.1376139999767977,0.06953396517523687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834003933611669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232907553474813
mentalhealth,Jmantheboss04,2020/02/16,"I’m tired of nothing feeling real half the time Everything in my life feels like it isn’t real and not in the “Oh my god this is amazing there’s no way this is real” way, it just feels empty. One thing that I always loved was the rain cause no matter what it felt like it was real, it was full of something, it existed, it mattered. I mean somethings feel real most of the time like my current relationship but some days even that doesn’t feel real. Everything just feels empty, nonexistent, fake, and like it just doesn’t matter. I don’t know how to handle so I’m gonna just bring it up to my therapist. If you read this thanks for listening to me venting not many people do.",1.6559627329192566,3.8648395652173946,3.132546583850935,90.16043478260872,80.8840579710145,5.971842650103519,20.726708074534162,7.1686216300943375,0.5578968944099385,532,15,110,7,14,174,80,138,0.09699999999999999,0.755,0.149,0.7634,1,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,0,4,0,10,3,0,2,0,32,26,6,0,1,8,0,7,4,0,1,2,1,0,0,16,2,0,0,9,1,0,1,8,1,0,2,4,8,9,7,10,21,3,11,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,3,8,70,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026349632431116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143815844316536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996019642062029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164957728237294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949884619529895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.329102465490667,0.07749765817503597,0.10415717286135467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05961740521000295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662216200620305,0.2119900931522873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790683461764664,0.0,0.0,0.10998101858316264,0.0,0.11816579697504108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408884706664502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735084044609301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520591165529672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085086904547766,0.7408393902181807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646620789474264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670253828934298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987319646307284,0.0,0.12595286828964966,0.07206884955200363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651034451999052,0.12468103694525952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221169270861242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,keepitcute7,2020/02/16,"Bullied for years. It’s been one year since my suicide attempt. My depression is magically cured idk what happened My depression magically went away. I’m feeling emotions that I haven’t felt in years

I don’t even know how to start this. My name is kat, I just turned 19 and I was diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety at the age of 13. I tried killing myself on Valentine’s Day of 2019. I was over weight growing up and as a 5’11 female, people were never nice to me. I didn’t have a problem with how I looked, but others really did. I didn’t know my appearance was such a disgrace, until I got into high school. Freshman year I was so alone and bullied to the point where I stopped eating and developed anorexia. I dropped 50 pounds in the matter of 3 months. The school didn’t do anything and I ended up transferring. It got worse at the school I transferred to. I would get harassed by the football players and groped or called horrible names by them. It was like a really bad toxic relationship that I was battling. Except it was with the whole football team and anybody else who had an opinion about me. Everyday I would hide in my sweat pants and baggy sweaters. I wanted to be hidden so bad. I hated dressing up or looking too “put together” because I didn’t want people to notice my outfit and then notice all the flaws that came with me as a person. I wasn’t diagnosed but I feel as if I had really bad body dysmorphia. Everything I did revolved around how I looked. I would spend 2 hours every morning on my makeup , and if something was off about it — I wouldn’t go to school. Or I would get extremely PHYSICALLY sick to my stomach and not be able to leave the house. If I did have the confidence to go to school, I would leave mid day. I missed about 48% of my high school experience (according to my 4 year attendance card). I was hardly ever at school. Growing up I was always into modeling, music, dance and any type of art. I was a friendly introvert. I always saw the best in people and never judged anybody by how they looked because I was always the “underdog” too. So I was nice to everyone but I was shy at first. The ball happened to roll into my court and I started to get recognized online for my “beauty”. I gained thousands and thousands of followers on Instagram and yet I still wasn’t happy with how I looked and I still felt so horrible about myself. I was tormented- bullied- and posted about online for the full 4 years, until I graduated. Sounds like a horrible high school sitcom but people boo’d at me as I walked my graduating stage. There was actually a hate page (that is still up to this day) with over 70k followers. This page strictly posts vile and horrible things about me and people follow it for amusement. I guess to summarize and make it short. 

I hated myself. I wanted to die. Everyday. I fucking hated life. Every little fucking thing about life. I looked in the mirror and wanted to fucking off myself. Every. Fucking. Day. I couldn’t stand seeing my reflection. I was bullied so fucking bad that I got so numb and started believing everything that was being said to me. I was such a pure fucking person and people ruined that. And I hate everyday that I gave people the power to fuck with my life like that. 

I hated seeing others smile. I didn’t understand why others got sad after a heart break. I didn’t understand why people got happy when they got a raise. I would get so envious and irritated at laughter because I didn’t understand why others were able to feel that way— when I couldn’t. It sounds harsh, I know. Luckily I never portrayed these feelings outwardly, but my mind is so fucking dark. 

But fast forward. 

It’s 02/15. A year and a day since my suicide attempt. And I feel like my life literally changed in a day. Like some weird universe shit. Like as if I had to complete a full year of tragedy and loneliness, in order to feel emotions again. Not even trying to be corny, but I feel happy again. And it’s really hard to explain, if you’ve never felt the depression “numbness” before. But it’s like you’re stuck on autopilot. And you’re just a bystander to your own life. I didn’t feel that this morning and I feel like everything that I felt in my past was so irrational and all the things people have done to me, doesn’t matter anymore. I have tried to get to this train of thought for YEARS. I’ve tried everything. Drugs, exercise, laughter, sex— nothing ever worked. I was still numb and felt like I was living in some type of simulation. And now all of a sudden, I wake up and now I’m seeing life for what it is? I’m excited. I’m so grateful for every little thing now. And I guess idk why I wrote this whole thing .. I just needed answers or maybe somebody who could relate to me?  Idk who to talk to about this feeling because I don’t know if anybody would ever understand or if it even makes sense. Sometimes I just feel like I’m this extraterrestrial being, that nobody can relate to because I feel like I process things differently. 

So if you’re reading this and have input— please leave it. This is my first post. I might not ever post again but I need to get this off my chest. Thank you for reading.",2.8756047854785467,5.162495607920795,4.028372524752477,84.91991852310234,77.07920792079209,6.901402640264027,25.174298679867988,7.937092434478242,1.5814892739273931,4084,148,774,68,96,1328,360,1010,0.215,0.682,0.10300000000000001,-0.9992,4,1,2,0,0,3,111.0,0,2,3,9,55,57,20,0,36,0,76,31,7,7,12,161,174,87,4,26,30,0,20,11,1,9,14,3,0,2,54,51,2,1,29,8,1,15,24,36,0,5,61,33,124,21,115,96,13,127,0,7,10,8,21,48,9,20,68,536,178,18,0.07146502120620997,0.0,0.034869775872007916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03700810462345952,0.0,0.0,0.08919693388057849,0.0,0.0,0.024299332530110854,0.0,0.02733527280719285,0.0,0.035437048906258,0.0,0.0,0.02940481161913652,0.03180951016894009,0.0,0.0,0.0335718699539381,0.0,0.11934061522251062,0.10891103403240084,0.0,0.03040573469947925,0.04025830317213984,0.03749906535724387,0.0,0.0,0.03969076396215762,0.0,0.0,0.03648688845995941,0.040868472880511486,0.0,0.0,0.03780025825626118,0.0,0.037464857527891936,0.0,0.0,0.028529502135728788,0.0,0.0,0.13826707957293335,0.0,0.1231054360923745,0.07253549219742472,0.03708470457014981,0.037332868303044144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03656676440967495,0.0,0.0,0.04143836797829767,0.03656327897802788,0.029849927513279712,0.08038852992810308,0.03164839842330352,0.0,0.0,0.07080295875605161,0.1292884062613908,0.12042472525464495,0.03414394516436785,0.12845630593794552,0.034953251901049504,0.0,0.0,0.21680917203292568,0.10210925085820564,0.1715440689246449,0.0,0.0,0.060788110530079174,0.0,0.0,0.02760684905363392,0.2642730421325251,0.11201257191080917,0.0,0.040615218463549096,0.0,0.17147131773761026,0.0,0.07872677789637254,0.0,0.0631962822357945,0.1141137659410201,0.06401862184005003,0.2116707389762793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04234319711001011,0.0,0.11326007790944195,0.0,0.0,0.03518932517792248,0.04123051969727505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03953272877044155,0.0,0.07855061336633301,0.0,0.0,0.11350670808437095,0.0,0.0,0.1514335738491332,0.1920280973803468,0.07162672578333626,0.03155246151248345,0.0,0.18003785666309494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477034565901294,0.0,0.03589810967667744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037906546988067134,0.03607964951538531,0.0,0.028521349055362043,0.0,0.0,0.05299040769440901,0.11023646006607538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03428630763481946,0.08136340031024134,0.0,0.0,0.02421327394930689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03411072458851536,0.2229518133856973,0.06240049998289327,0.0,0.039223566370662585,0.03377877228805328,0.0,0.1368874711181487,0.0,0.0,0.03419118686620537,0.0,0.035921042541773154,0.0,0.0,0.0714843606558891,0.0,0.09156464510230196,0.0,0.0,0.038363343868947464,0.0,0.0,0.033989800246146215,0.0,0.0,0.2893056671843009,0.08542255394079389,0.0,0.0,0.04036756612673585,0.03667890864411223,0.05911660404092895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027508632394789716,0.035340366664401116,0.0,0.07587496475730136,0.0,0.11414411650082107,0.0298739788601062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817113395728888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028720438499330668,0.0,0.03289769494913524,0.0,0.0,0.1424345537257469,0.0,0.0,0.028367622058699124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704011662364127,0.03886671068745785,0.0,0.14879521485000655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430384220455113,0.028362803705280742,0.0,0.04351257152017839,0.0,0.033124395317783106,0.12897213193125326,0.07978814401369294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02601369329120774,0.0,0.03641448101834853,0.17768345221642326,0.0,0.0,0.20709508762818635
mentalhealth,thehybridview,2020/02/16,"I need to talk to someone. (Dissociation) I feel weird lately. Like everything I do is a simulation. That I'm not real. I'm not human. I don't know *why* I feel this way is the thing. Socially, I'm suspect of mild autism based on my traits, some of my family members have anxiety, and I may be depressed. Whatever I'm feeling I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. Am I just going crazy?",-0.8035637779941567,1.286808721518991,2.762278481012661,86.08211295034083,101.0253164556962,6.481402142161636,20.00097370983447,7.61054688173877,1.3401754625121716,295,11,62,8,13,107,55,79,0.267,0.682,0.051,-0.9447,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,0,15,20,1,0,3,3,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,3,11,1,6,17,2,5,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,2,2,37,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19806975945227115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230036653198082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326966864087891,0.0,0.2440826268470113,0.0,0.3927465883961087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714772755184993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229326705497486,0.0,0.29206812470488297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649310562775967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919826697787257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947026874278009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639318936757853,0.2193783854748914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081065875965684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17201204949334872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055151871694034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336310975186977,0.0,0.2977402134381881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,just_wanna_be_free,2020/02/16,"I think my ex might be either a narcissist or a sociopath or a psychopath, I seriously don't know, but that thought is driving me crazy and I need help figuring out what happened there. Trigger alert!!!! For those who haven't seen my previous posts, I have a history with sexual assault. But my ex was the one who got furthest away... I'll tell in detail my particular story with him.

He's a guy who's studied tons of books on how to persuade people and how brain works, and at first I thought of it as a reality interesting thing as I find the human brain absolutely fascinating, it's an incredible organ. But that's not the point, the thing is that I think he used his knowledge to manipulate me into being in denial and not acknowledging what he actually did to me. On our third date we kissed for the first time and my Uber app did not work, so I couldn't get back home. It was already 2 in the morning and staying out in the street waiting for my app to respond so I could get a ride was not a good option. So as his ride was quite close, he said I could go to his place and order my ride from there, I didn't have going to his place in mind that night, but I was more scared of being on the street alone on my own than accepting his offer, then I told him I would only accept if he understood that me going to his place didn't mean we were going to have sex that night, he told me he was ok with that and that I shouldn't worry about it. So I accepted and we went to his place, my app was still unresponsive and he wouldn't offer me to use his instead and pay for it cash at my drop out point, no, he saw mine wasn't working and started kissing me, I kissed him back as I did like him. But then he started getting more sexually aggressive and suddenly, without any previous warning started trying to finger me (I was wearing a skirt), I said no and moved, he asked me if I didn't like it and I just replied I didn't want it to happen that night. He stopped for a few seconds and kept on trying and trying and trying and I kept on saying no, I was scared already by that point. Then I went to the bathroom hoping that would help his hormones go down a little bit and calm down, but then when I came out of the bathroom he was naked from his waist down, I was in shock, I asked him why did he do that and his answer was: weren't you curious? I mean now you won't be curious about it anymore... I was terrified, tried to ignore him and to make my app work again, but it didn't and he started kissing me again and trying to put my hand on his cock, I didn't want to touch it but I felt really intimidated, he pulled me to sit on his lap facing him and started kissing me, I responded to his kisses, but I was terrified, he started trying to finger me repeatedly again and I kept on rejecting his advances, until I decided the best thing I could do would be telling him I really didn't have any energy at all and just needed to sleep, to please let me sleep(I had no other choice, it was either staying there or risking other people on the street doing much worse to me, I live in a really dangerous city), and that seemed to have worked, but he said we should cuddle then (he slept, I couldn't sleep). The next morning I just wanted to go back home but he started trying again, kissing me and finger banging me, I didn't want to and said now a few times but then I just gave up, I was scared and feeling worn up, he kept on insisting until I eventually gave up and didn't put any resistance anymore. It really did hurt, he finger banged me and he was really rough and I told him it was rough and he said that was the way he was supposed to do it so I could find pleasure, I had to fake an orgasm, but I really only wanted it to stop and to go home, well then he pulled up a condom and proceeded to penetrate me, I again had to fake an orgasm so he'd let me go, then he came and stopped. I felt so uncomfortable! Well I took a shower and then when I got out he made breakfast for me. I told myself after leaving his place that maybe it was just an awkward sexual encounter and was in denial for a few months and kept on dating him. A few dates after that episode he told me about will power and timing on food and how people's will power wears down when they haven't eaten for more than X amount of hours and stuff, that has been echoing in my head a lot lately when I remember what happened that first time ""we had sex"" (actually my therapist told me it was rape, but sometimes I doubt myself when using that term, but I do feel raped indeed), he waited until I was too tired to fight him so I'd let him do it! He knew the will power theory and everything and still did what he did. Then during the 3 months I kept on dating him because I was still in denial, he would sometimes drop comments about women who claim being raped after having consensual sex and then regretting it and how sucky that was, how he hates those women because they had no credibility and how his dad was an amazing lawyer, he did try a few sexual things without asking me for my consent before doing them and when I told him it was the first time that happened to me he replied ""isn't that the point of it all?"", he would never listen to the things I told him I didn't like him to do to me and he'd constantly do them to me, one of them I told him several times too and he'd always say he'd stop doing it the day I don't laugh at it, but my laugh was involuntary and nervous and I tried explaining that to him, but he always ignored it saying it was a lie, that if I laughed was because I liked it and then try to turn things around by saying I didn't do a certain thing he wanted me to do, or that I was being unnappreciative of what he did for me and stuff (he always complained about him being an amazing friend, relative or son and people being unnappreciative and insensitive about it), when I didn't do exactly what he wanted when he wanted he would throw on tantrums acting like a f***ing child, pouty faces, manipulating me with not being affectionate and stuff like that... The last tantrum was like a week before he left this country and he tried to force unprotected sex on me, I was terrified, I thought he was going to violently rape me, he ignored my no's several times trying to penetrate me with no condom but I moved rejecting him and saying no repeatedly until he got mad at me and went to sleep really annoyed. He always insisted we keep in touch after he left because ""he thought he was be a person who could bring a lot of good things to my life and help me in many ways"" and as I was still in denial, I accepted. He kept on talking to me every day as if we were together, but we were not anymore, after some time I started feeling really uncomfortable about it, and thinking about what happened when he was here, and started feeling disgusted but guilty about not wanted to talk to him anymore, then started going to therapy and finally blocked him from everywhere. His response to that was sending me an SMS from another number asking me to tell him why did I bock him after ""everything he did for me"" and after being such an important part of each other's life, I was terrified and didn't want to tell him as I'm well aware he'd never say it to my face and recognize what he did (sexually assaulting me)... 

What do you think? Does he fit the profile for a narcissist, a sociopath? A psychopath? I don't know... Please help me understand!",7.836099439775912,5.524643675925926,8.237584811702456,75.60665266106443,63.96031746031746,11.354435107376284,34.33846872082166,9.809953580106626,2.9858364145658256,5826,183,1210,93,68,1942,435,1512,0.16899999999999998,0.732,0.098,-0.9990000000000001,4,1,0,0,1,0,146.0,9,3,5,15,63,72,16,7,58,1,146,45,21,14,6,249,264,146,0,34,45,4,15,7,1,14,3,12,4,6,87,94,4,18,35,1,2,31,45,35,3,8,122,29,209,37,169,101,24,206,0,4,2,21,185,68,1,17,105,875,296,8,0.0,0.0,0.06539364141402643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03470189673777115,0.07394895151719656,0.0,0.11151801550292552,0.0,0.0,0.06835526462402047,0.03513374539274748,0.0,0.0,0.1329149735549311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029827259417708932,0.1252935740513957,0.0,0.031479795474230826,0.07729165990182241,0.0,0.08169928171248135,0.0,0.05702192406300866,0.0,0.03516226261868916,0.0,0.036579648040376736,0.0,0.0,0.0748070920558406,0.0,0.07664340231198448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0362078590905596,0.0,0.1337582466282941,0.0,0.0,0.04321692925006464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029321145252813305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02823007570220237,0.0,0.060225692579084326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776614272502683,0.0,0.06434163139526541,0.036703958489987705,0.06124737560129528,0.11400004166448632,0.040515337902737335,0.0,0.025886492563230445,0.0,0.05251618183814062,0.0,0.19042114307721927,0.056206139006975984,0.08039293044270278,0.0,0.0,0.03317600285114499,0.1481453105117558,0.0,0.0,0.03308003386960049,0.03438661004767545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983290712570226,0.0,0.10082712684705744,0.033278812583108316,0.0329964568847991,0.0,0.035868644398306365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029781488323663063,0.0,0.0,0.036827815169966166,0.027311693260102226,0.03779599392258807,0.035477796940829184,0.07280828427953387,0.10278583031268053,0.04733226497107236,0.11458466614495695,0.03358160688162302,0.02958622908060578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05697085407372815,0.0,0.03170399148030673,0.02236537700955452,0.033969615167901784,0.033661072561159244,0.0729952622909256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035544351504873416,0.033831299510113516,0.0,0.05348800863007175,0.07122271085593287,0.024630613086799227,0.04968824193006937,0.051683466268702696,0.0,0.03563379097889095,0.09432875097989214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045408784957853686,0.05096533082281016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03628350871191898,0.0,0.0929147923957402,0.02925596607586046,0.17503211174395214,0.0735585982438572,0.12669521768760442,0.0,0.03208928784497538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06736515267023535,0.0,0.03563753517353973,0.0,0.0,0.1717173517260618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037955531914016565,0.0,0.15935840949978566,0.15987090854389485,0.10063543180142813,0.0,0.0,0.030502415564860563,0.0,0.07570401810835489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411996196380932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627617205154644,0.0,0.2371557274439853,0.07142543451772318,0.10703107830939053,0.11204937297897798,0.0,0.0,0.11506835041008236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05386137448582001,0.11714215966622868,0.0,0.03831679436340829,0.038902808141002616,0.1780780804843188,0.08587663701948206,0.0,0.10639942805966628,0.15629997879509258,0.03850998016137503,0.0,0.2881459897048161,0.037226168869842015,0.2957270429669805,0.036444681361985067,0.0,0.034880712166533524,0.0,0.08681474206220287,0.0,0.0,0.19762584821252926,0.053190677846841776,0.026876326112700244,0.0,0.09037719539437326,0.09318061739564168,0.06046753339390785,0.0,0.0,0.06459677760530771,0.0,0.12196308180928865,0.03402675920947161,0.03414526555508133,0.14280932414810418,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hireddithow,2020/02/16,W need to go to a therapist but my mom won’t let me. Oh and I’m 15. I need one but idk how to get one if my mom says no.,-4.887727272727275,-3.8857156060606033,0.14265151515151686,108.73397727272727,99.0,4.512121212121213,11.280303030303033,5.985473137389443,-1.6871151515151517,87,1,32,1,4,35,25,33,0.145,0.855,0.0,-0.5267,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,7,7,5,0,3,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,4,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,18,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410392054075902,0.0,0.15675416020829855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820433741688575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6460712072514797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4090322382329296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.373803866373236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193421522207531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202468445121402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thethiccdaddy69,2020/02/16,I’m scared for myself and I can’t think straight I was sleeping then I woke up around and hour after I got to sleep and had an urge to jump onto my neck and I was genuinely about to do it. I’ve not been able to sleep much though out this night. I’m just asking is anyone knows what’s wrong with me and if there is a way to help.,-1.1865333333333332,0.7186138133333344,0.7186666666666675,104.75266666666668,90.86666666666667,3.866666666666666,12.333333333333336,5.033348758259628,-1.6696666666666669,256,3,68,1,9,83,56,75,0.085,0.85,0.065,-0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,2,0,8,4,4,0,0,13,15,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,6,0,8,0,13,9,1,11,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,4,46,11,0,0.22275151953238828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557530416878471,0.0,0.0,0.19829607844842165,0.2082426015179564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815473890861844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149305648142047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193653768627284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241840967949914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374799697463516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20903721147938525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22301313036869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6687371640474459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427301794042084,0.21885223696933315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17680978797501984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24354381848930665,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mentalhealthchaser,2020/02/16,"Mental Health In The Work Place # Mental Health And The Work Place

​

Everyday thousands of people go to work, due their jobs to the best of their abilities and head home to their daily lives. Most people do not have to stop multiple times during their day to do a personal awareness check. Am I O.K? Am I doing my job correctly, and with efficiency? People with mental illness face inner challenges not seen by their peers or supervisors. It can be a very stressful life, getting up each morning hoping that the day will be a good one.

**I am one of the lucky ones.** I have an employer that is aware of my illness and takes steps to accommodate me when ever possible. I am in a profession that can be unsafe to work in if I am ill, by being either manic or depressed (Bipolar Disorder). I have explained to them what happens to me, and they do their very best to understand, and allow me the time off that I require when I am sick.

Workplaces can play an essential part in maintaining positive mental health. They can give people the opportunity to feel productive and be a strong contributor to employee well being. Yet in general it can also be a stressful environment that contributes to the rise of mental health problems and illnesses. No workplace is immune from these risks. Education on this subject is the best form of awareness. The giant wheel we call industry literally fathers our entire way of life. I find this fact impressive and amazing. Over many decades humans have crafted a society that affords all people the opportunity to participate and benefit through jobs and careers allowing them to enjoy the more important parts of life.

Unfortunately work can be so ingrained in our priorities that more often than not mental illness is overlooked, frowned upon or simply not accepted. Until recently I was guarded with my illness, but I would rather be up front with my peers when they ask why I missed work, or had to leave. There are also those who simply make unkind remarks or half hearted jokes. I have learned to be understanding with these people, as they simply have no experience with mental illness, and cannot understand why someone would miss work for reasons that they cannot physically see on the person who is ill.

There are many types of mental illnesses, and I can only speak personally about mine. I enjoy working and contributing as that is how I was raised, and how I raise my children. I developed bipolar disorder in my early twenties, and since then it has been a challenge to juggle this disorder and a career. I will however continue to do my very best to contribute gainfully as a member of society because that is what I deserve.",7.04692912371134,8.336611241237119,7.327535438144331,69.5227464561856,64.42268041237114,10.433634020618557,35.56862113402062,10.481140341803084,4.108547680412372,2152,99,343,53,32,699,241,485,0.11699999999999999,0.7709999999999999,0.11199999999999999,-0.6672,7,0,0,0,0,0,52.0,3,0,13,19,16,29,0,3,25,0,54,23,3,6,4,67,71,37,0,6,13,1,1,0,0,4,20,1,1,5,23,25,0,3,9,2,1,4,8,8,1,5,5,4,48,21,61,52,13,40,0,3,2,0,29,18,0,10,17,275,71,19,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986978787079005,0.0,0.0668620474288213,0.07498360624792166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05768990561660281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03761744276688858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590405935303633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301213878733541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959484238043757,0.0,0.053150166758127435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21217276019706785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055819633728677404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036357861193399,0.0,0.0,0.031202098011861155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05640122160221811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03224058479215023,0.05919722488402489,0.035070841756095726,0.05175886918280439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05456936827396891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06333158913039164,0.2623765840756349,0.0,0.07312586865069243,0.0,0.0,0.061899502566284376,0.06129130153680844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18371100325192605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534128417988525,0.0,0.0,0.13076140190626714,0.0,0.0,0.0544904804937943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04119146567665705,0.1251271764066495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4975080289354573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12544754373318212,0.046932736130278895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336504100151958,0.0,0.2566889313013473,0.16164665437158926,0.1289462586771286,0.0,0.0,0.06956801230638966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590475072841947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06344748234719012,0.060930531605873625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04917435688706698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0510466062699597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228612612441911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05159177396364453,0.14137568797324718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04639774616222946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196642838895431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19272480728198615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15275001226104326,0.0,0.04898200419135137,0.0,0.0,0.055484110409428564,0.0,0.11136616768334463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3594010936472343,0.0,0.0,0.08767309357137452,0.0,0.07498360624792166,0.0
mentalhealth,zachary-phillips,2020/02/16,"How my therapist is teaching me to reclaim my inner world & love myself Every therapy session I am told that I need to love myself. After hearing this for the millionth time, my therapist and I were able to nut out how to actually go about this.  


The following seven steps have started me on the process of self love - something that I am tremendously grateful for.  


**Step one**: Recognise how the past has led to my current behaviours and thought patterns.  
\- If I see the links from my past to now, I will know I am not fundamentally 'broken'.  
**Step two:** Acknowledge that I am human.  
\- Like everyone I make mistakes, and I am also capable of healing and growth.  
**Step three:** Be nice to my inner child (be my own parent).  
\- Give myself the things that I lacked growing up.  
**Step four:** Relax my high standards  
\- Stop holding myself to standards that I wouldn't hold others to (impossible standards).  
**Step five:** Stop comparing myself to others.  
\- I should only compare myself to myself. Personal growth is all that matters.  
    
**Step six:** Work on living in the present moment.  
\- Being mindful and present will help manage thoughts of the past/worry of the future.

**Step seven**: Forgive myself over and over again.  
\- For when I forget these lessons, for my mistakes and for everything that I would forgive others for as well.  


I went into depth on each of these points here if you would like to read more: [https://medium.com/the-abundance-mentality/the-7-steps-to-self-love-39e50a2b0492](https://medium.com/the-abundance-mentality/the-7-steps-to-self-love-39e50a2b0492)",4.403767040413001,7.496259948616602,3.400748568201984,79.87728966685489,97.73517786561266,4.594950391223684,23.345083487940634,6.39352644273079,1.217863176574978,1249,46,182,16,49,364,142,253,0.040999999999999995,0.7929999999999999,0.166,0.986,2,0,1,0,0,0,111.0,0,1,0,2,10,12,0,0,9,0,19,4,0,5,1,45,35,15,0,10,3,1,0,2,0,6,1,1,0,4,15,10,0,4,8,2,0,15,2,2,1,8,5,2,36,10,36,21,5,45,0,0,1,3,15,15,0,2,17,147,51,5,0.11232632212247314,0.0,0.10961428712476902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982731921895935,0.0,0.12170552309025795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463977098273188,0.10733261442680647,0.10095165548061726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775364346525056,0.0638376374233106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659992866045722,0.0,0.07528996598144279,0.1186789264654216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061731609051407274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097539343347057,0.0,0.09918620034776346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5068944561397366,0.0,0.07497869224493668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341756470867576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328854457215422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611522289825325,0.08542922959206989,0.0,0.0,0.12472508779300084,0.0,0.32168455336252805,0.0,0.09807901184912518,0.0,0.0,0.10618468148162644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235671922048927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950953579366064,0.0,0.35154255430298303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647429053746221,0.0,0.0,0.0795051489386936,0.0,0.0,0.18781966986829374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845493868308994,0.2608390350694251,0.07462461725158258,0.0,0.0,0.1783491055866154,0.06549838173396838,0.0,0.0,0.10733261442680647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972649506069178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099485343708343,0.10412762595679836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177490030520021,0.11407283256479987,0.0,0.15958679287236074,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mms15d,2020/02/16,What’s something you wish your therapist had told you? What’s something that you’ve figured out but wish you’d heard earlier? Or something one of your therapists have said to you that really resonated with you?,5.963076923076925,8.00566735897436,5.515897435897441,78.67076923076927,67.71794871794873,10.328205128205127,33.51282051282051,10.504223727775694,3.924497435897436,173,8,30,5,3,53,27,39,0.0,0.847,0.153,0.7131,0,0,3,0,0,0,3.0,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,8,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,2,7,0,4,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,1,0,20,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15668570596204964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813022692692698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21995025778944355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5340305688341062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5369457881893769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22094773980623253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5318003176823382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,literal90sgarbage,2020/02/16,"Negative emotions when listening to certain genre of music. So background story. Right after I graduated high school I was not in a good mental state. I had a lot of mental break downs in a week. During that period of time I would listen to a certain subculture of mental music during the those mental breakdown. 

 I just need advice, now that I'm in a better mental state. I would like to go back and listen to some of those bands during that time period because I do like the music and miss listening to it. My problem is when I start listening to a song. I start to get into a depressive state. 

 I want to stop avoiding listening to these band because of my reaction to listening to the music. How do I start to try to separate these negative feelings with these bands/songs?",4.814942037827947,6.323545906040269,6.086015863331301,75.55482001220258,69.80536912751678,9.176571079926788,28.310555216595482,9.573946990214177,2.796645637583893,616,22,106,14,11,207,76,149,0.142,0.768,0.09,-0.8362,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,7,10,0,1,10,0,7,0,0,1,2,19,24,6,0,5,2,0,1,2,0,2,0,8,0,0,9,4,0,2,1,3,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,9,13,6,26,20,2,26,0,2,0,0,9,7,0,2,16,79,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398579524666846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005260564027236,0.0,0.1744926718384249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265804937662814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327146563039205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099389626748953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236719256533859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747757605012886,0.0,0.08133999059380913,0.12004462173320228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121710564520044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984515008318013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167789405084982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7211706428981157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612374933532973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694919900944402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222609683520708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484792362145033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30390918247569565,0.0,0.0,0.11965707689897055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669121217260242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717099245044147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441754090396372,0.0,0.11480448430648653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20334067417090845,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sydthecat7,2020/02/16,"opinions on therapy i have a feeling this is very controversial. but i can’t be the only who feels that therapy just doesn’t work for me. ive gone to many therapists, each for a long period of time. all that happens is i have an anxiety attack for the session, go home, try to apply the tactics they suggested, and only feel worse.ive always been very open to it but have never gotten good results. i was diagnosed with depression. my opinions were therapy and medication. therapy didn’t work. meds terrify me. so what else is there? i’m so happy that it works for most people and it’s really beneficial but i just feel like no one talks about it not working for some people.",2.9158661186142116,5.365954374045803,4.733893129770991,79.07104521432768,77.77862595419846,8.610921902524955,26.87081620669407,9.265573868473778,2.757418790369936,537,22,98,15,13,182,89,131,0.159,0.735,0.106,-0.7753,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,4,6,5,1,0,6,0,14,2,0,1,2,23,23,8,0,0,6,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,10,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,6,2,0,1,6,4,10,3,12,16,4,8,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,4,5,70,20,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877793063948024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000818234670948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872438189004886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259765896096878,0.13268831779098905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920823855830036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644043023830425,0.093393622327653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429693866243847,0.10965022042117356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560421148985944,0.13916464138959547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13113296730619056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638681321581093,0.0,0.0,0.1156920404783148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253982061712424,0.0,0.0,0.14521168995844733,0.13169684024837855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008271261576991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858611119095643,0.198852291130176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812636065486726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374906104369641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507591677529267,0.0,0.0,0.5980051321097207,0.15178774287036967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622978303392956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887571686836193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157320768170212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806923311910625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,femmefatelis,2020/02/16,"Always tired.... So, I have a diagnosis of dysthymia and acute anxiety disorder. I can't afford therapy right now even though I want to go. I feel SOOO tired all the time, especially when I have important things to do like clean or study. Right now I work part time and am getting my graduate degree full time, which is overwhelming. I sleep 9+ hours every night, and I still wake up immediately exhausted. I've even tried sleeping like 7 hours and it just made everything worse. I think I sleep so much because of my dysthymia and not being motivated to do anything. I want to start exercising to see if that helps with managing my symptoms, but I never have the motivation to even do important tasks. Does anyone have recommendations on supplements/things that help them with lack of motivation? (Not interested in Pot/CBD recommendations)",5.757478070175438,7.897172072368424,6.506578947368425,70.97438596491232,68.40789473684211,10.592982456140351,31.08771929824561,10.686352973137794,3.788392982456141,673,28,117,21,12,221,101,152,0.122,0.743,0.135,0.2333,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,4,12,5,0,1,3,0,11,9,4,4,2,24,20,12,0,4,6,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,1,0,5,7,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,2,0,0,1,2,16,3,14,18,5,19,0,1,1,0,3,6,0,2,14,77,21,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585794241236852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651739891515627,0.0,0.0,0.09735909602343262,0.0,0.11458177393555835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487875822654165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15957987474609048,0.0,0.12184892433190828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758979965331538,0.0,0.11731480228561865,0.0,0.12513897043638686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040338573042969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274659307952687,0.0,0.07913269162562922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866578370062948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27424459334794865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605021412080662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317512404646849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023566332210011,0.0,0.10738964519098464,0.0,0.0,0.13066630175788108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15078219044362035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378185676898981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095539840461782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4180184544929721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855402999795243,0.0,0.1111963878766993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447225599732438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15923184912363744,0.0,0.09250415684233587,0.08921868293208657,0.13680153994516098,0.0,0.2435740161887279,0.3200693300515913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09453409232533623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642534547491265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136759801522732,0.0,0.14189636329143115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,starofmyownshow,2020/02/16,Friendly Reminder!!! If you’re taking medication make sure you go take it! (Throwing this into the universe because I nearly forgot to take my meds tonight),4.8755555555555565,8.133252851851854,4.9644444444444495,75.50000000000003,76.03703703703705,5.0814814814814815,34.925925925925924,6.42735559955562,2.6501703703703705,125,7,17,1,3,39,25,27,0.0,0.775,0.225,0.7696,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,5,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,3,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,10,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19313812520166876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447839705276361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006318685699912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114881254528312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35192943523025033,0.3191753682054313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.298610841391688,0.0,0.7146557326786452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cloud-desu,2020/02/16,"I just wanna feel heard These past few weeks have been nothing but terrible for me. I just got out of a relationship that I really was comfortable in, and I poured everything in that relationship. I barely talk to people because all of my problems were shared to my s/o, but now that we're over, I tried to talk to other people but they really don't care about my problems. They say ""Aww"" and ""I'm here for you"" but I know that they really don't care. I can see it with their looks and response. In this world full of ""I wanna talk about myself all the time,"" I try my best to be a good listener so people will also listen to me, but they don't. It's always ""OMG SAME"" and then they tall about themselves, completely disregarding the problem, which is me. I am tired and I really just wanna talk to someone who wants to listen, because I am tired. I am tired of WANTING to be heard. I just wanna be heard.",4.2063405797101465,4.702500576086958,5.460652173913044,83.22275362318841,70.41304347826087,8.742028985507247,25.11594202898551,8.841846274778883,1.5892768115942033,702,18,148,12,12,235,98,184,0.165,0.731,0.10400000000000001,-0.9033,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,6,1,11,10,0,0,4,0,16,3,0,0,2,31,32,13,0,9,9,0,1,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,11,7,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,7,10,30,6,28,21,6,13,0,0,2,0,22,8,0,0,5,114,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799504643246704,0.10196294321558652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14939826869113196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285979765888818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498750181419581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12848066546135778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013088503891914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061959812784060674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278058364095104,0.09800628493009557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06734467807725411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290258284086658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758025818875448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11697811986176128,0.2548610372470177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35176216310551234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31400857528200943,0.0,0.0,0.2631238058725168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744857992179597,0.0,0.0,0.09764836791875443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382758828080332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3939714488959524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714539520390915,0.4225244758224347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16639298242321024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455431652617692,0.0,0.09829404875666747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hells_City,2020/02/16,"Is it normal to not fully compreheand your refelection is you?    So that sounded weird. What I mean is that when I look in the mirror, I understand that that is me. That is what I look like. But there's an underlying thought that my reflection isn't right. That's not me. That can't be me. Ion knows if it's just because my brain thinks reflections are weird or if there is something wrong or what but I find it strange. And when I imagine myself it's blurry almost, like an incomplete image. I just have an idea, I don't really know.",1.343055555555555,3.723364601851852,2.88851851851852,90.38333333333335,83.53703703703705,6.562962962962962,21.037037037037038,7.793537801064563,0.9296148148148152,419,13,89,8,12,137,63,108,0.08800000000000001,0.862,0.05,-0.2056,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,0,7,5,0,0,4,0,12,1,1,0,0,25,20,10,0,3,10,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,15,1,0,0,11,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,3,16,2,3,18,0,5,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,6,4,66,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24349042199736046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14822856997081665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271447876815751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222445708101869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744989515430754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672696387713607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375921738808437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083876696681037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648734019989697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23824596126165065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15577503836022905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076579991138365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18719706767816985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558076256300308,0.0,0.1930425180786832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531389738384469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658581685673354,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,peachy_ivy,2020/02/16,"Mental Illness 
Mental illness, “a disease or period of sickness affecting the body or mind”. Mental illness is a little cockroach that creeped in there like a parasite. But, they can’t be surgically removed or killed. The disease is just there. There is no medication or treatment to fully help. I am mentally ill and there is nothing I can do. There is nothing. No treatment, medication, facility that will help. Just imagine a helpless maple leaf just being carried by the wind. There is absolutely nothing that will help. The only thing is that some days, things are better. I strive to make all days like that. 


What happened? What happened to humanity that they can’t make one part of the body not malfunction. No one has found a cure for, PTSD, DID, BPD, BD, or any other mental illness. I want to be better. I need to be better for my sake. I want to influence people and to make sure they know it gets better. But, how can I say that and not believe it. It is just the seedling, the little white lie. Is there something I did? Is this genetic? What are the causes? There are a number of endless questions. We never know what will come our way so we hide behind the rock. We don’t come out, not ever. 


We all suffer. Slowly going down the drain. We will all dissolve at one point. We all have our own problems that we can’t handle. Why is that? Why do we all need to suffer and bleed out in pain, just to be human? We developed from millions of generations of dinosaurs. They didn’t have mental illness, so why do we? Why do we need to constantly be in pain? Why are we even here? What was the point of that, to be here. Did someone mess with us?  Did God or the Devil mess with us to pay for what destruction we have done? Do we really deserve this?


My life has been a slow train slowly, and not knowingly about to crash. We all have our problems but why do we need too? Is there some sort of obligation? What is the point of depression, anxiety, stress? Why does life need to be stressful to be a life? We never deserve to be in such pain but we are anyway. We are human but not some rats in a lab. We can’t be mutated to be mentally ill. We are living, breathing, organisms that just want some joy. Why are some people better off than others?


We don’t deserve pain. We need nerves in our body but why do we feel pain? Is it “God’s Plan”? Will it happen in a few years that we will never feel pain anymore? I wish that I was healthy. I wish I was like the other girls, but why? Why do I think that so automatically. I am jealous of the girls walking around with their group of friends who love them and are true friends. Why can’t I have that? Do we really need friends? I like being alone but I am so lonely. I can’t tell anyone who I am. I just need something to get me through day.",0.9832105658756588,3.434107863309354,2.523756039944164,91.74906528508538,86.37410071942446,5.261849028240095,20.888435520240524,6.755614485485044,0.4502622463223456,2156,70,448,27,67,701,210,556,0.151,0.727,0.12300000000000001,-0.9454,0,3,2,0,0,0,85.0,32,0,6,6,30,37,3,2,25,0,82,25,4,7,12,116,114,25,1,15,26,0,2,4,3,6,20,1,0,5,36,40,0,0,9,1,1,5,20,21,0,4,11,4,61,16,53,84,14,35,1,5,1,1,56,18,0,13,15,334,97,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05139353925431315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03374473545581757,0.0,0.03796077724967528,0.0,0.04921179786295513,0.03469693209762932,0.0,0.0,0.04417419714306554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05590712373521161,0.0,0.21943361274991965,0.0,0.16535692841965438,0.062497308664858926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050975574560845116,0.0,0.08549010541704508,0.0,0.053623870808764136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960064647178156,0.0,0.042739449416589415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043424641624608365,0.050780645515700384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032774934726450884,0.04488603813899696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05018085816129576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05440808080926205,0.11501375401104247,0.0,0.05185100732255591,0.0,0.028201387853645076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164200023985229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978196019618447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054899511027805686,0.0,0.08181303945245721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051486883916622,0.0969714229902342,0.09946877800573244,0.04381723100415394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044785890378954606,0.0,0.09936942841746342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999781077876826,0.3500518994996341,0.0,0.05010418400285745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943533180803126,0.11481488775172975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284125452335822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008756750325692,0.03773984964055573,0.31680853295137623,0.0,0.0,0.053735907963801705,0.0,0.06880344418031853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072679570151053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496331261698744,0.05800558948591016,0.0,0.055588118173864366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357838681894253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039461492436379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042044651578488405,0.07640304701894439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136839154685092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04676825009255326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04337191009064148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593344802491764,0.031795843531553215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11937857364940692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780521593267157,0.03938772007971755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.537314817326765,0.0,0.11412595190555964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0319550110072309
mentalhealth,ickleJeb,2020/02/16,"Can thoughtbroadcasting be extinguished I don't say things often because I feel like who ever is there already heard me think it. 

Also live tv makes me leave the room or distract myself from it because I feel too connected to  who is speaking.

I don't make direct eye contact in public because I feel pulled in and exposed. Never got diagnosed because i feel like I would not be able to say it.",4.487017543859646,6.31115963157895,5.0315789473684225,81.5493859649123,71.10526315789474,7.171929824561403,29.771929824561404,7.793537801064563,2.0703666666666667,316,13,56,4,6,101,52,76,0.066,0.865,0.07,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,8,2,1,2,2,14,17,3,0,1,2,0,4,2,0,1,1,4,1,0,6,1,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,2,9,10,2,5,12,0,6,0,0,1,0,8,3,0,2,4,39,16,0,0.19410357278989432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141981192647488,0.1552245570323892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4732949454739698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197011040533634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17557779422772102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925783942494921,0.2773352623696564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15524235885890605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20552765724109245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18965840222994013,0.0,0.17139701091578174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591312841523973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970464144126233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.308717903658946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128953788861859,0.12437373188500828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378856090063712,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AdamX42,2020/02/16,"Being attacked for being white and having mental illnesses 😂🤔 So recently I have been diagnoses with two um, illnesses so far which are basically similar to another. Schizophrenia, Psychosis, and actually theres a lot more. Depersonalization, dissociation, derealization, depression, anxiety. And guess what none of my medication works. I havent had a single psychosis pill that has helped so far and I've been on well over 3-4 different ones. Anyways that's just context I guess. 

Recently theres been a few females who are on the opposite side of my political spectrum who have been attacking me in groups, verbally, for being white lol. I then tell them I'm sorry but thanks to my mental illnesses I react incorrectly many times but I do not change my political views on being offended. They then call me racist for some reason? Idk. They say having mental illnesses isnt an excuse to be like who I am? Interesting, so if I was Deaf I should just hear? Sounds good. I also honestly probably have BPD I wouldn't be surprised. And also amnesia or something. Sorry I'm just going on I guess lol. 

You know it really sucks having all these illnesses and I've gotten so used to them it feels normal. 24/7 I have an out of body experience. Like right now I feel like I can see myself typing this from the window lol. Creepy right? And the funny part is distractions dont work anymore, all the way from showering to playing games to pain. None of it helps and no one understands how overwhelmed I am. And then I get ""well you act normal"" LOL thanks, I have a problem with showing my emotions I forgot which illness does that, probably psychosis? Idk but like I feel like I'm going crazy but my illnesses and my intellect are having a fucking world war 200 tbh cause holy fuck it's the worst feeling of my life. And I cant kill myself because that's selfish and I'd rather die than be selfish. Lol get it cause- nvm.",2.192941797081062,5.037793556473833,3.9031193951116574,80.83541410233867,85.8870523415978,7.27668952581912,24.252329875153862,8.265842613841098,2.1355267452083697,1523,60,272,38,47,507,200,363,0.233,0.596,0.171,-0.9796,2,0,1,0,0,1,44.0,0,2,4,2,18,30,8,2,12,5,37,16,1,6,2,51,63,29,3,7,11,0,4,5,0,2,13,4,2,0,17,15,0,1,7,3,0,3,9,16,3,3,8,12,39,14,26,46,11,24,0,2,4,2,18,13,3,7,12,186,56,3,0.0,0.0,0.08994019141073767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14740936599387955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966435181547192,0.07050632265512427,0.0,0.0914033681592742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20970302649578595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05618320739181418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237504597385601,0.11607916721039035,0.0,0.0941112367374106,0.0,0.0,0.18935862581939286,0.09749883324236228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938197342084698,0.09354599920938324,0.0956531937484423,0.09629328658183607,0.0,0.0,0.08065461287660981,0.0,0.10801722967878932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367373446133178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015550251734664,0.0,0.0,0.1864064981262527,0.13168604238673035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17041096049299448,0.09630529502155047,0.0,0.10475950680637926,0.07730401291985017,0.0,0.0,0.30459192650709666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038771688890026,0.0,0.12355312668267578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196742318199327,0.0,0.05065172506077268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509918822916158,0.22513693518138095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783557760269527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093441307879052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928470020485084,0.2786433105845338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806051593759662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490739841144198,0.0,0.09807054483830137,0.0,0.0,0.09980620892303448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987399028827513,0.08818989552999766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590435520519671,0.09476144035868217,0.18200454054891269,0.0,0.0,0.1574175940991515,0.0,0.0732936709876214,0.0,0.0,0.07344393685838219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095347191552043,0.0,0.20634336775966694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08055667213837057,0.1697071407374608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05374241939411868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003225973047421,0.09594749155926252,0.0,0.07960136336918693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07315665014772685,0.0,0.0,0.16573562968650873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419510136798135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brizzlebill,2020/02/16,"Old photos and painful memories. No making excuses for it, when I crashed, I crashed hard. I lost almost all of my friends, my career that I loved, and became a generally toxic, volatile, isolated person. That being said every time I open my camera roll, or worse, cloud photo storage, i'm crushed with photos of happier times, with people that will never speak to me again. Bridges are burned and a large chapter in my life is permanently closed. I just don't know what to do about them. I hold the memories so dear, but they're so painful to look at. Do I destroy them? Embrace them? Upload them to offsite storage and bury it? I'm conflicted, and just thinking about it hurts. 

Advice is appreciated.",3.8750508905852414,6.265076854961832,4.520935114503819,82.0935146310433,74.34351145038168,7.114758269720102,29.23727735368957,8.07648339933343,2.1846178117048347,552,24,99,9,12,176,90,131,0.177,0.708,0.114,-0.7909999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,4,1,8,8,1,0,3,0,8,4,0,1,2,22,17,10,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,1,3,2,0,1,7,9,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,4,17,3,13,13,1,10,0,2,1,1,10,4,0,2,6,64,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21660426229043828,0.0,0.0,0.22196116367681368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18675869270242126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17125450036900558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985644409514193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372923547035731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181891909862468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15656550166375313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18613915415485446,0.0,0.2419688291734573,0.0,0.2000574282539951,0.0,0.14796023277313872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095839020225473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325956083457032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4717252079087564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367161377459174,0.19354556593157946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21085007736621286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14203122082123576,0.0,0.0,0.25850426347696953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22589118160056895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rishooty,2020/02/16,"Got obsession in control, interests disappeared with it I don't know where exactly to post this because it deals with so many different issues. I can think of at least 3 different subs where this could be relevant but this feels the most neutral.

I'm basically a 27 year old autistic that's struggled with ptsd, depression, and obsessive tendencies. Recently I've managed to get my obsessive tendencies under control through therapy and medication, but it turns out that it was not only a coping mechanism for my anxiety, but also the basis that fueled the passion for my interests.

Normally I'm into programming, building computers, video games, and doing small related projects. Particularly vintage stuff. I've intermittently lost or switched interests between them, but this is the first time in my life I feel completely burned out on them. All the passion and nostalgia that fueled it is gone. I've even tried to play my favorite ""when all else fails"" games, read tech articles, watch YouTube channels, but nothing works anymore.

Now, this wouldn't be a problem if I had something else to go to. I don't, I've tried broadening my interests for years but nothing really stuck. Piano, drawing, writing, volunteering at an animal shelter, etc. 

The obvious conclusion is that I'm depressed, but that's nothing new and now all I want to do is sleep anymore for no other reason than I'm bored.

Will my interests ever come back without the obsession? Is there a way to actually find another that sticks? Do I just need to get through the adjustment of not having an obsessive mind 24/7 anymore? Technology is all I've ever known so I don't know where else to go, especially because I code for a living.",6.5811815220610015,8.337161996742676,7.148689665383476,68.66462170565592,65.84039087947883,11.314717204619484,38.384512881255546,11.20814326018867,5.078037133550487,1371,75,218,44,22,450,174,307,0.125,0.772,0.10300000000000001,-0.8029999999999999,2,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,2,7,15,20,0,6,15,0,21,5,1,3,8,54,42,18,0,7,13,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,19,12,0,2,10,6,0,5,8,12,0,1,6,3,18,8,33,31,7,33,0,4,1,2,6,13,0,3,13,146,37,7,0.0,0.0,0.1046160544645052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573134001331897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241318703384978,0.08201109176314085,0.0,0.31895394900554697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243358556067698,0.0,0.13070164499985507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234711968730623,0.11240180005829148,0.0,0.2404777570335228,0.08559401013163882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105230549382323,0.18467002848525785,0.0,0.0,0.2240116138425049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26866662297628785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11956127218634373,0.07080751170354152,0.19394508012781048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841155691706457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798290236118834,0.091188029216933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201977482106996,0.0,0.12185349061223427,0.0,0.08574117205582019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11189356721087343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783349678409312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757216558532248,0.0,0.0,0.09466347143140087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170262938845238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868846064232908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10799717980156692,0.0,0.0,0.10824590879552616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794907228225813,0.0,0.1035387017858692,0.0,0.0,0.1050375749344414,0.3085966115822219,0.0,0.11249301040755594,0.0,0.0,0.08153379609805618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267220519691284,0.0,0.0,0.10258015653815684,0.12531623604057654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723343613086142,0.0,0.06867789983943705,0.11022400386525426,0.10585143653907712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728184684462057,0.0,0.0,0.08253120396932613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207334168121123,0.1227234182951197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12259760304975965,0.0,0.0,0.06869226687330234,0.0,0.0,0.06251176238566655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556953510691162,0.11660762997330724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323194748950442,0.08509388268192672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334124018881892,0.0,0.07804609826473234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13807226984682494
mentalhealth,ginakarenina,2020/02/16,"I withdrawn from my meds for weeks now... and I’m just afraid that I’ll be relapsing soon What should I do? I stopped my meds (without my doctor’s knowing). I haven’t made an appointment with her again for two months now. Okay. I stopped taking my meds because
1. I rarely (like super rare) get attacks now. 
2. It’s too expensive. I’m kinda tight on my budget right now.
3. I don’t want to rely my sleep on the meds. 
Ugghh. I don’t know. I’m anxious for weeks now thinking I might relapse soon. That all the progress I made for the past months will all go down to waste.
What should I do?",-1.1931358885017431,0.7549665040650417,0.5089198606271772,101.84609756097562,103.47154471544715,3.3184668989547035,17.23925667828107,5.288315135182226,-0.7389377468060392,452,14,105,3,21,144,73,123,0.13,0.8170000000000001,0.052000000000000005,-0.8404,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,10,5,1,1,4,1,10,2,1,2,2,19,22,1,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,3,3,0,2,1,4,2,0,1,2,1,18,3,12,15,2,20,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,2,16,63,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16983365981127127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17102565180076806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09164168801002824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15387234097852684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854286191361627,0.0,0.08543778901659319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652383265632273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734451795517538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28449770769203697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6679449222413264,0.0,0.0,0.1594797066927337,0.0,0.0,0.2399889593352881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350999457074087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838368184570353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504417107785484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513704763377391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303181357958128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632740719539913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468536354558509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867038213797661,0.0,0.2411763570841358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449157842192979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cherrrrrry,2020/02/16,"hello! lately, ive been feeling completely numb? and just cannot handle anything. ive been feeling down but i cant feel it, and its the worst feeling ever. some guy i liked for some time, i found out he did the same things with me like he did with my best friend and im sitting in my room drunk and cannot cope with it. dont knwo why im wriring this but i literally cannot feel one single thing, had to let it out advice would be appreciated , <3 i just want to let it out",-0.2189158576051753,1.8739291067961192,2.0778883495145632,95.45301375404532,88.02912621359225,4.598381877022653,17.321197411003233,5.985473137389443,-0.5050122977346279,370,9,87,3,12,125,65,103,0.092,0.669,0.239,0.9422,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,2,0,16,2,0,0,1,26,23,6,0,2,4,0,5,2,1,1,1,0,1,1,8,10,1,0,6,1,0,0,5,2,0,1,6,5,10,4,11,13,6,10,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,2,5,61,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17692980096498245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899700698391827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900113687274064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18983803436788488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21220104886329072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163779195563112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4577470480282457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985230168784252,0.13988655783706258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17927793154300153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3911518826429486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20424364084655208,0.0,0.0,0.3702923693182111,0.0,0.17691360508104897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226909865792348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24057652503845103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557758051928834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679391801942367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337854745501745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861987600495664,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anonamousgirl,2020/02/16,"i don’t feel human i am socially inept. i never experienced things normal people have experienced. i don’t know how to socialize. people don’t want me. they don’t see me.

it hurts to be 27 years old and to never have had friends. to go out, see people talking and having someone by their side, and knowing i could never have that. how normal it is for them to be normal. 

I am the result of when modern medicine interferes with natural selection. i should have never been born. 

i try to feel okay in my own coping mechanisms, but at the end of the day i will always be not normal. not human. 

perhaps suicide is indeed natural selection. the way a scorpio stings itself when they can’t escape fire.",2.4403046218487394,4.889021580882353,4.3368067226890785,81.27205882352945,79.51470588235293,6.8268907563025225,22.94957983193277,7.957251820313856,1.5323168067226884,549,18,98,10,14,186,83,136,0.052000000000000005,0.8390000000000001,0.109,0.7655,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,4,0,4,3,0,0,5,1,22,0,0,3,4,27,30,8,1,7,3,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,11,1,0,0,2,7,16,2,14,22,1,18,0,1,2,0,10,4,0,0,12,77,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925521141339585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144307879440261,0.0,0.0,0.09243069850393858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694056669883705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14493560777417927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073006023133046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145307669919412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534289415585853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15753181633231506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4421544030284191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5616997004810239,0.0,0.0,0.15039211037471795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2980838520291396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22841782304581415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921970340501805,0.12143608845019545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15677077732821915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519662670385387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521662953055347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730608822574703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453490569411573,0.1137621666461692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229453443934504
mentalhealth,michellejs,2020/02/16,"Is it rude to not look at and barely interact with people when you are not feeling well. I live with a friend who is having mental health problems. He has been mostly holed up in his room but we passed each other in the door to our apartment yesterday and he just ran by me and turned his back to avoid looking at me and mumbled something about being in a rush. It really hurt my feelings because I felt invisible or unwanted and unwelcome. I know he's not feeling great and I dont expect a conversation or anything. Just for him to pause momentarily and acknowledge my existence and tell me he cant talk. We are normally very close but when he is not doing great he withdraws.

I'm legitimately not sure if this behavior is something I have a right to be upset about. Am I overreacting and making an small issue all about me?

I have severe anxiety issues and this triggers them every time. I made a stressed out comment when he did it. Something like "" what you're not even going to look at me then""? 

He later texted me that he just doesn't want to interact with anyone. 

But it stresses me out when I live with someone who is not even showing me what I would consider to be basic courtesy. I need another perspective since I have been ruminating between angry, her and guilty since yesterday and now I'm afraid to go home.

Talking to him is not an option until he feels better. I tried asking him last night if we could talk for a minute when I saw him down the hall and he said ""sorry now not a good time"" and went back to his room.",4.979013157894734,5.733385190789478,5.864315789473686,80.09121052631579,68.80263157894737,8.843157894736843,29.01578947368421,8.982922981607832,2.245716315789473,1214,42,237,21,20,400,170,304,0.195,0.767,0.038,-0.9932,0,1,3,0,0,0,22.0,4,1,1,1,18,17,1,5,11,0,26,1,0,3,2,67,49,28,0,10,19,0,5,1,1,1,1,1,4,0,12,25,0,1,7,1,0,6,12,9,1,0,9,10,38,8,33,35,3,41,0,1,4,0,38,17,0,6,19,169,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657211188912857,0.0850452372841603,0.0,0.0,0.07773309813619594,0.0,0.09148396648843644,0.0,0.10392954387609303,0.0,0.0,0.17096672397532325,0.0,0.0677685918664879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832139917312724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876071206041046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029116514478478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685432189393458,0.0,0.09366606112182448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248448687644664,0.0,0.1067412507589674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589016268447472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636167621022024,0.09324466053837853,0.0,0.24513205181650846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816919448599485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151321880512058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901047216485665,0.0,0.0,0.2320665356218744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061096477796979326,0.09061891144846206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05431236051718152,0.0,0.19633142827258696,0.0,0.2800660221692685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10519235000027084,0.07420726717449608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203386010367196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243162283292763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432611715288037,0.10892362596332572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770717258737467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637529102319253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121876032197612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493912133489336,0.1057487389119482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125591182646947,0.0,0.1839230086912328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419452469332612,0.2567537758864472,0.0,0.12444643269065908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546911909316737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477701497853728,0.0,0.0,0.26806425430347197,0.09716804165692954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964899139483066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07547756887731301,0.12092173567040053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172742285777542,0.0655713253240871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995575873438674,0.10305629944011108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897243484531412,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheKidsAreSad,2020/02/16,"I'm a disappointment. I wish I wasn't so sorry all the time. So I've mentioned this before on other subreddits: r/Guilt, r/depression maybe... eh.

This is going to sound MEGA pathetic... but...

Well, anyway... I'm mentioning it here because I'm sick of the pain and I really need help. Yes, I am seeking therapy, but it won't happen for a while. I'm also trying to be as open-minded as I can to the idea of therapy, but it's very depressing being told there are so limited options (that I know of) to help cease this pain. Drugs, talking, crying, sleep.

None of those have ever really helped tremendously... Although they have succeeded in calming me for certain amounts of time.

The story is, I'm a transgender male (FTM) and I only came out to my family (most of them anyway,) a year ago. I'm currently still in High School. My mother accepts me wholeheartedly and does whatever she can to support me. She brags about me to her family and does her best to show me off whenever she can. She also has Reddit... so I hope she doesn't find this. (Fuck.)

My father, not so much. He told me-- when I first came out-- that it went against his Christian beliefs, and that there'd be ""certain rules about this,"" as long as I were ""under his roof,"" which meant that he was not going to allow me to transition, or at least he'd put up a big ass fight... and obviously I'm not old enough to leave, nor do I want to. My mom, brother, and dog are here, and I'd hate to leave them. Plus, I don't know the first thing about the adult world, mostly because of my (pretty crippling) anxiety (diagnosed.)

It didn't register for a while, but when it did, it hit me like a fucking truck. I was remembering all the times we shared together:

* Waking up for Kindergarten and eating Honey Buns while watching Max & Ruby,
* Him making me full bubble baths, and me making bubble-pies to ""serve"" him,
* Him saying my prayers and tucking me in at night,
* Him reading a book to me about a girl and her daddy: ""Would you still love me if I were a dinosaur? Or a nasty fly? Or a crazy horse??"" and the daddy saying: ""Yes, of course, I'll always love you - No matter what.""
* Us going out on the porch of our old apartment, and grilling. I'd never grill because I was too young, but I'd keep him company and watch geese. He called me his ""grilling buddy.""

It felt like a major punch to the gut, as if all of that was completely fake. As if all of it meant absolutely nothing... because he never valued me as a person. The only thing he saw in his ""daughter"" was the sexual organs and gender stereotypes I was given... and It felt like pulling off a BIG ASS bandaid. Maybe even removing a cast...

But eventually, that pain was pushed into the filing cabinet of shit in my brain, and thrown into the dark closet I was once in, never to be opened for very long again. Then, my parents began to argue more. They'd argue when my brother and I weren't home, and they'd sometimes argue when we were. If they did, he'd usually try to drag us into it.

My mom edited my school info, telling them of my preferred name and pronouns and such, and he tried numerous times to edit that, and erase whatever my mom had put. He's not a bad person, and I'll always love my dad, but that shit really fucking hurts... I've been doing my best not to ask him for much anymore. If he wants to give me something, I'll accept, but I usually don't ask for anything myself, because I feel as if he's trying to buy me back like he always does after something happens. 

We went to the transgender clinic, and at one point I got very excited, as the doctors were talking about Testosterone. I was ecstatic until I looked over and noticed my parents. My dad looked so dead inside... my mom was crying. I basically asked her ""what's wrong"" with my eyes, because words wouldn't come out. She said, ""It's a mourning period."" 

That was the straw that broke the camel's back... and broke my fucking heart. She still doesn't understand why it hurt me so much, and I can't tell her because of-- VOILA-- anxiety. I remember feeling the worst anger, the deepest depression, and the most crawling guilt I'd ever felt, and all at once.

That hurt more than what my dad had said did. Because I felt she was completely on my side, and didn't care about what voice, name, or reproductive pieces I had. I felt she understood my struggle, as much as a Cis person and a mother could. Hearing those words fucked me up in the head. It made me realize that everything bad that'd been happening was my fault.

Them fighting, my fault.

Them crying, my fault.

Their dreams for their little girl growing into a woman being crushed into dust, my fault. 

Parents have everything 100% planned out for you from the day you're born. And because of me, those plans were ruined. I felt so fucking guilty and sad, I didn't know what to do with myself. I wanted to disappear forever. I wanted to ask the God I didn't believe in ""WHY"" this was happening to me? I knew that sounded pathetic. There are/were people living in much worse situations. I felt/feel I had no right to complain about something so insignificant. 

I mean what the hell's wrong with me? This lump of muscle and knowledge in this thick ass skull... what does it do? It twists into a fucking Rubix cube puzzle, and ends up making younger me feel like he's ""technically killed someone.""

I'd already felt like that, but hearing those words made it all... real, kind of. In a way. 

I felt like a LITERAL murderer because I wanted to be myself. ""What if I'm not me, and old me is dead?"" ""What if I killed me?"" and then ""That's ridiculous, retard! YOU are you, and you can't kill yourself and then still be alive!"" It flipped on and off from ""That's absurd and pathetic that you'd think that!"" and ""But It's true. I've ruined their view of me and killed the person I was... I'm an awful person."" Blah, blah, blah...

This shit comes back STILL, almost weekly/monthly.

I wish I wasn't so fucking sorry... I wish I could tell her how she made me feel because I know she didn't mean it the way my stupid ass brain took it. Did she? 

Sometimes I just wish I could vanish and everyone's lives I've been in would be better without me... (although I'm not suicidal, as I have an irrational fear of death.)

Thoughts?

​

TL;DR: I feel guilty over shit I cannot control because my stupid adolescent brain took words and twisted them wrong. I need help, but help is a long ways away. 

(Thanks if you read this. My posts on this subject are always so fucking long...)",2.787988503323916,4.661492365054606,3.8806269764304098,87.81142717600599,75.81747269890796,6.772705935264437,24.030048769518352,7.63319966405982,1.1196494272743882,5020,160,1018,69,111,1626,472,1282,0.215,0.679,0.106,-0.9995,4,0,4,0,4,0,298.0,6,8,13,10,48,87,29,3,54,3,88,41,18,9,15,198,192,112,10,28,33,16,14,10,1,4,10,9,4,10,68,70,1,3,37,6,1,18,32,59,1,3,69,31,173,28,131,101,26,128,3,12,7,16,133,55,18,20,58,667,241,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03133729076320741,0.0,0.035399781091538934,0.0,0.03901165644326678,0.056541739127234425,0.1176623175522194,0.07660745079277112,0.042956379192675344,0.0,0.0,0.05408815207240193,0.0,0.035059545660258984,0.0,0.0,0.02909156849712662,0.0,0.1321968673025848,0.0,0.03321423605740812,0.08155019429365468,0.05903465268207099,0.2586019878121853,0.0,0.03008182895957405,0.039829440143333526,0.0741991917886344,0.031265847214220925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839310152180994,0.036098201499414964,0.08086621969056335,0.036043577212681054,0.0,0.0,0.06090499401619024,0.07413150494720047,0.0,0.03965011687085351,0.08467675049110006,0.0,0.11649707420637788,0.022799025028021173,0.0,0.09134551530639402,0.03588139361452132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03618412656076262,0.1237466032074706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040996933973392526,0.03617377824575512,0.0,0.0,0.03131125485451844,0.03652792139075151,0.0,0.023349570031031,0.06395556236432087,0.0,0.03378021707389231,0.06354394429532029,0.0,0.06665317449589657,0.039780670752809735,0.10724977532072323,0.025255375752845963,0.3054899644610816,0.0,0.03231095946578518,0.060140547887265576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941400231554745,0.0,0.033912725281104124,0.060273829939577625,0.0,0.02827411178975123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504613171742876,0.0,0.0,0.03490264270081992,0.03628120723568458,0.0,0.07968823073075998,0.04189212415533803,0.1184780324191893,0.03735118090161038,0.035460797861385764,0.035112373514320325,0.0,0.0,0.11353469145755495,0.039907946747027134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031422357369914194,0.15644638051755705,0.03681352196104472,0.07771383060828095,0.0,0.0,0.07486503038776711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12089793127828102,0.03543185085387093,0.062432679877873584,0.12514113409768335,0.059373317390247524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571930127703883,0.10035235373599834,0.07079292291937192,0.0,0.07103138969928167,0.07701707829670909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035695300783565274,0.16561468405043647,0.028217517269674926,0.0,0.1299384231980345,0.05242591229964949,0.08179660110811403,0.0,0.0,0.03317532568481168,0.0,0.03392106298762257,0.04024832676948853,0.11128749032348856,0.07529715399759684,0.02395533515941763,0.05377336488981988,0.11285061417080952,0.0,0.11776217031630178,0.0,0.0,0.02450852841772306,0.154339402256694,0.0,0.0,0.03341893430554143,0.0,0.033857309596233065,0.03596555070809683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107676683173254,0.0,0.0,0.07072285316532048,0.04023815603608452,0.06794192000132927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009353159289777,0.030190295167406993,0.0672554284565385,0.056226435772493664,0.0,0.07155593906289202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14515270453569054,0.0,0.03973697167572799,0.035377390557724125,0.0,0.02995351614445524,0.0816467665844004,0.06992778670698288,0.079147025644127,0.0,0.0,0.1411602047794869,0.0,0.0,0.03695743964501187,0.0,0.038669196855805436,0.04011687163893686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056828971713393774,0.09269725116099516,0.03254724289365974,0.08085586540682592,0.0,0.046972409705600265,0.022652044357438155,0.0,0.028065427893582257,0.08245581512303225,0.0,0.0,0.06756043414778462,0.07855443415240812,0.09600636917151982,0.0,0.0,0.03680253287217583,0.08504786932136366,0.0,0.07787015834141175,0.0875069602104267,0.10425721442424396,0.08418198260713376,0.0,0.0,0.0317855676084096,0.0655430565442599,0.06379910980039608,0.0,0.16261157671971382,0.03407793137803111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03602656539867715,0.050225893910660735,0.11595512741092324,0.042956379192675344,0.02276543869829704
mentalhealth,s1cometomall,2020/02/16,How do i make a daily schedule that wont be too hard to follow? i’ve kind of been thinking of this for a while yet i spend All day in bed on my phone with no contact with anyone cuz i barley have been using my social media & ik its embarrasing for being 18 but i spend most of the time playing games on my phone😳 my psychiatrist said to have a routine to follow but i dont know where to start,2.656896551724138,3.1774716436781634,4.57764367816092,88.06922413793106,73.9425287356322,6.719540229885059,22.54597701149425,6.42735559955562,0.3691701149425288,311,7,71,2,6,107,61,87,0.021,0.9359999999999999,0.044000000000000004,0.1896,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,9,0,0,4,1,12,17,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,2,2,2,2,3,0,0,0,3,2,9,2,14,11,2,12,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,6,50,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3421486739963746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22080147712142695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20365267610454654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3700930801630354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828778267072767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3288374066428648,0.1735450260949766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21078632652161725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003801252662763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32189904921899365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22351147749543465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202339768782278,0.0,0.0,0.18413449028575346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727334689297653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Reninz,2020/02/16,"I feel like no one would care or notice if I died aside from parents and dog I'm not necessarily suicidal at the moment.  But this has always been a question on my mind, whether anyone would care or notice if I died aside from the obvious answers being my parents and my dog.  Problem is that realistically, I'm going to outlive my parents and my dog, so if that happens, who would be left?

Sometimes friends would say stuff like they would care, but I always felt like that is somewhat contradictory because realistically they wouldn't notice in the first place, so how could they care?  I feel like I'm always the one who's trying to strike up conversations or plan events with people just to maintain any semblance of contact with them.  So I feel like if I'm gone, they wouldn't even notice and would just carry on with their lives.  

I've been told that it might just be due to people being busy with their lives to try and maintain contact and stuff.  But in this case, am I just the odd one out for trying to keep friendships with people?  Assuming everyone at one point in their lives becomes too busy to maintain contact, doesn't that mean for certain that in the end no one would care when I died?",9.585579399141636,7.104880369098713,8.740776824034338,73.8953712446352,60.75965665236053,10.865064377682405,37.033905579399146,8.548686976883017,2.953120515021459,958,32,185,9,10,301,110,233,0.091,0.754,0.155,0.9468,3,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,8,2,11,13,0,0,7,0,22,0,0,1,2,54,41,22,4,15,16,3,4,5,1,10,0,1,0,0,13,12,0,1,8,0,0,2,6,1,0,6,5,5,21,12,27,21,1,21,0,0,0,0,21,13,0,11,11,128,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19410335820866825,0.0,0.0,0.05287829795403571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05437039848635366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04740072675585663,0.08587791290329358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3963987522020304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062083660633228226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24210245965000898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887075764413364,0.0,0.0,0.051358611661320934,0.0,0.0,0.07430137035617837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795077070243015,0.16665159580164018,0.07466014449248437,0.0,0.0,0.0661411546323186,0.0,0.0,0.060075855500195625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044191823391084815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876139164544431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911513349067915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844846005095214,0.0,0.0,0.1899438434114477,0.0,0.20598596183325693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470156431731894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824892487709219,0.07851369805271853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3541132760603277,0.0,0.0,0.2634551201658665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590241090363334,0.0,0.0,0.16172340540619898,0.0,0.08124085429757842,0.0,0.07350670983887546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07440417403535454,0.0,0.0,0.08710707124524207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061836506541705215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690492880697032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17802925792274812,0.08505493942428677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430137035617837,0.0,0.15837830711895284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3866607659349906,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stevehrowe2,2020/02/16,"What may be causing this? At the moment, I'm feeling down and a bit angry. When I get this way, I tend to want to deny affection to my family. Like just now I literally told my young daughter I didn't want her to cuddle with me, I wanted to be alone. What's wrong with me?",0.1712429378531084,2.018944796610171,3.0450000000000017,90.74569209039551,84.08474576271186,5.967231638418079,18.30790960451977,7.1686216300943375,0.191845197740113,209,5,48,3,6,74,43,59,0.18,0.66,0.161,-0.4871,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,2,0,11,12,2,0,3,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,10,1,9,7,1,7,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,5,33,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31449221740425976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315096783042399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119345682298177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862563744051112,0.0,0.15353573215012728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15864579968723008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834918106212036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901527958517673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5373060010847228,0.2410250705847055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319961338913384,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,babetrixi,2020/02/16,"Is it normal?... ... To cry/feel like crying a couple of times a week? And not really know why?

I would know if I was crying because I was upset, or hurt, or stressed. I don’t know why I’m crying randomly as of lately.

I try not to judge my feelings and just let myself cry and feel the feeling - and I do - and afterwards I feel better (as per usual), and I don’t even think twice about it. Its so casual.

I just wanted to know if anyone else is in the same boat? Or if it happens to others? I just don’t have a large pool of people to ask - so I thought this might be a fitting place.

Thank you for any answers!

Also - I take care of myself. My mental health is better than it’s ever been, along with just about everything else in my life. I feel like I’m pretty happy and stable - so just a little FYI. 👍",-0.3625294117647079,1.7128663352941196,2.232058823529414,94.19926470588236,88.58823529411768,4.576470588235295,14.970588235294118,5.985473137389443,-0.6614470588235295,607,11,136,5,20,209,96,170,0.11599999999999999,0.7,0.185,0.8866,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,0,2,13,11,0,2,7,0,15,2,0,0,1,41,34,19,0,6,13,0,5,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,12,2,0,0,5,3,0,1,4,5,19,8,19,26,1,11,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,8,8,95,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922586464334879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845325947598412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066702494793536,0.11820673827742023,0.0,0.0,0.10785221880634814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032642235875193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20406480508774189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176239605499206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765097362783615,0.5068992710231935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927480193652848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619856619617991,0.10435571502933656,0.0,0.0,0.1036840815338032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34999698467426993,0.16483587651122644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201832338436856,0.1228099150193918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226293250653352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350235559076185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25360991479046674,0.0,0.13013857533891504,0.0,0.0,0.11797018796327648,0.08148685735736305,0.112724608844084,0.11562766377084527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626242108814365,0.1223857553703698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303479552054255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998069011664652,0.0,0.1205335661105957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736933026050987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390681258565135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321520764353657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674134266168779,0.0,0.0,0.10621408611977644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392227347891941,0.0,0.09158821178853263,0.0672712054072342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832636389930046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270600359492589,0.0,0.06804622307115175,0.0,0.09254014586346378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20820086558005774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195313868365918,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cidercutie,2020/02/16,Does life get better? I’m 23 and feel like I ruined my life for good. I’m not a criminal just a lonely fuck up,-2.7819230769230754,-1.1301034230769211,1.0142307692307675,99.36826923076923,102.46153846153842,4.138461538461539,10.346153846153848,5.985473137389443,-1.312046153846154,85,1,22,1,4,31,21,26,0.195,0.414,0.39,0.6794,0,2,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,1,6,1,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,2,3,2,5,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3501594510690319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3464726411689602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20018926826809388,0.28284563823162145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.366022062845148,0.2068520865366965,0.0,0.0,0.3320792769816556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5593006247074547,0.1934267260728481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mystomachhurts666,2020/02/16,"TW: My mother in my fifth grade year. Trigger Warning: Self-Injury

I don’t know what to think. I tend to forget things that happen to me, especially memories I consider bad. In fifth grade, my mental health declined and I turned to self-harm as a coping mechanism. My mother caught on. She once opened the door to check on me while I was in the bathroom. She also wanted to watch me shower. She told me how to shower, including washing. I think she touched me. I’m uncomfortable and I still wasn’t then. She cares, she’s just trying to tell me how to shower. She saw scars on my legs and said things like “Why are you doing this to yourself?”. I just remember staring down at my legs and feeling terrible. I stayed quiet. Why does this memory suck so much?? Sometimes I’m even scared to go into that bathroom because I’m scared she’ll decide to check up. Sometimes she mentions that she’s should watch me shower because I’m not showering well enough for her and I feel scared. What should I do and why does it take a toll on me so much?",1.4272977346278315,3.929022660194178,2.650703883495144,91.34621763754043,84.53398058252426,5.375080906148868,20.23381877022653,6.816661863887847,0.4072207119741096,812,24,164,10,24,260,112,206,0.138,0.828,0.034,-0.9645,5,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,0,0,10,9,1,3,4,0,9,4,2,3,0,25,30,14,0,3,3,2,3,1,0,3,2,2,6,0,10,8,0,0,7,0,2,2,3,6,1,0,6,9,37,3,25,21,3,19,0,0,4,0,18,12,1,0,5,106,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884405250100043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136429642081996,0.16593811210837506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13876930816127894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23821484772559376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140634053885772,0.0,0.08989683959364382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376387350409193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735227122058097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203582338975408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14467449080987976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480038984781859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649459816227417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716300372924206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001073865045204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14494862573023956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15418175479305074,0.0,0.12946813272630242,0.0,0.4087980509573791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28397683147017233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26922495859160833,0.0,0.0,0.1450710644201498,0.10869456070671063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233489889191603,0.0,0.11896278899807138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18084577895950293,0.17442267205455755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005527518041748,0.0,0.09240715308579904,0.14804442572412946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027894363040271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237578974210984,0.0,0.3684439370181991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764790907155627
mentalhealth,Eugene_Snow,2020/02/16,"Just venting Recently joined, I don’t know. Today was pretty rough. About a year ago I seemed treatment for my issues I’ve been battling since I was in middle school. I’m in my early twenties to put that into perspective. The last year has been a major stepping stone in my life. I’ve come a long way in terms of being healthier. Last night everything slipped and my mind fell into a chasm of spiraling self destructive thoughts and  I needed up hurting myself. I just hate the feeling of knowing that I’m better than this yet am apparently too weak to keep fighting it off. I know there’s always going to be a relapse. I know you just have to keep trying to cope in a healthy way. I just feel so ashamed for being how/who I am. For how it affects my loved ones. For how it affects my life. I just want to put that chapter of my life behind me. I have an amazing one ahead of me. I just need to keep moving forward I guess.",2.5835106382978736,4.324811127659576,3.80526595744681,88.70875000000002,76.02127659574468,6.189361702127662,25.57978723404256,6.9077264865688965,1.0295468085106392,724,26,148,7,16,236,111,188,0.11599999999999999,0.782,0.102,-0.5561,1,0,0,0,2,1,18.0,0,1,0,2,13,10,4,1,9,0,13,5,0,4,0,31,34,5,0,3,6,0,3,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,7,5,0,3,8,0,0,8,1,7,0,2,5,3,24,3,29,26,2,33,0,1,0,1,4,11,0,2,14,98,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115970942758568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137297757560209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088348645409745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773882167175545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284032281027504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13822032576907942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767912226095591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505698414723991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349444685515425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632013906254718,0.0,0.0,0.142659747273834,0.0,0.3644658101336354,0.0,0.0,0.3004658317833541,0.2228269745282308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896260944157532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095863327243475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12336019320633992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800913115133592,0.0,0.0,0.1452705717161666,0.0,0.2026948771257307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826612391319245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185237547756563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13905400138522078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27480487963866224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349562764120151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832875423386906,0.0,0.12442950554899525,0.14258838598381826,0.0,0.0,0.11306416871964214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085096702915887,0.0,0.0,0.12955787341133032,0.0,0.0,0.09279761833843594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061816128790335,0.21698247898514186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17603652839801984
mentalhealth,olieolieoxenfree,2020/02/16,"Trauma Traditions TL;DR Any ideas of self traditions to manage anniversaries of traumas/ days that suck because of trauma? 

Today I was lying in bed and started thinking about my birthday. I'm turning 21 in March and it occured to me that I probably won't get any cards or whatever. I know this is a stupid thing to care about and I have better things to be upset about, but it's making me really sad. 

I left my parents a few years ago because they were emotionally and physically abusive (specifically when I showed signs of OCD) and I am incredibly proud of that choice. But it's hard having no one (I haven't spoken to any of my relatives since I fled). I have about six photos of my childhood because I wasn't able to take much when I left and around this time of year it really seems to get to me. Maybe it's that mother's day is coming up, or thinking about how if I had a different life I would get cards in the mail from relatives- regardless I feel like I am missing out. It almost feels like I'm less of a person because I don't have familial love. That sounds hella dramatic, but it's kind of true. 

I have an extremely small social circle because I often am bedridden because of my health and lately it kind of feels like the people I am friends with don't care about things the same way I do. I visit friends who live about an hour away once a month, despite it causing problems for my health and they never take the time visit me (even when I am extremely sick). I know they won't visit me for my birthday and likely won't do more than post on Facebook. My friends near by will likely spend time with me, but not in a birthday sense. It will just be a ""this Friday we will have a movie night instead of going out without her"" which doesn't really make me feel loved or celebrated, but instead kind of just reminds me that I'm not well enough to be a 20 year old and go out to the clubs and bars. 

Anyway, I'm trying to figure out how I can celebrate myself instead. For example, on the anniversary of leaving abuse I always get a ring. It's a physical way of seeing how far I've come and it makes me feel a little bit less sad. I want to do something similar for my birthday and mother's day- essentially create traditions that turn kind of shitty holidays for me into something that I can semi look forward to. If anyone has any ideas i would love to hear em! 

Sorry that this was a big old ramble!",5.700227339395718,5.5103914127310105,6.458101349369319,79.73977156057495,67.11088295687884,9.339073041947783,30.329202112056322,8.942964678507748,2.318362921677912,1906,63,379,29,28,630,229,487,0.113,0.7609999999999999,0.126,0.8541,3,0,2,0,1,0,41.0,1,0,3,2,23,31,2,1,21,0,39,8,0,7,2,70,81,29,0,7,15,3,6,5,3,8,4,3,1,2,30,24,1,0,13,4,1,9,13,10,1,2,6,11,54,21,64,64,8,57,0,3,2,3,23,22,1,8,30,259,84,1,0.07333506499062492,0.17378012035064078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500711032956527,0.0,0.07343447435992059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102064882176974,0.0,0.0,0.19948143584063072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05127758256663648,0.0,0.0,0.06528375577831526,0.0,0.0,0.06890070760141112,0.0,0.0,0.26822624968092496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06485890547336395,0.08006289735445339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14953997256763138,0.07533531281873956,0.0,0.1263433299179931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14188515018118925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661953434227152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249207748455778,0.0,0.07577472583386882,0.0,0.04843711878683751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913377261951655,0.0,0.185402061657083,0.15717175524702384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997546788878795,0.0,0.15325817865766275,0.0,0.08335601488281609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06569381375685301,0.0,0.0,0.15590348956558542,0.08265394807461265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222026679185918,0.0,0.0,0.16557272399925102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054687403355564,0.08060606768242197,0.0,0.08272514756001864,0.07765124507760279,0.15935752537563636,0.0,0.05179872517840834,0.1791390422860221,0.0735010009334496,0.06475620594739567,0.0,0.06158298468404475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19856327803841356,0.0,0.14685517601206305,0.0,0.07367492968576808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05853534921818573,0.0,0.05390971080883458,0.0,0.056560523084120976,0.0,0.0,0.06881999064015705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390562884381673,0.07809945081741093,0.049693737964046886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142991105226556,0.0,0.0,0.05084130031868588,0.06403335008449312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023472057669672,0.0,0.0790676035403751,0.07017175307916625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14094096145396506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05843855207465636,0.06676148889504624,0.07650446656860574,0.0,0.0,0.06066352358389626,0.0,0.0,0.07475586345543943,0.0,0.1129138317137904,0.0,0.08209260122680252,0.05190693645387235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11027768442300646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461616757133299,0.09398029701170454,0.0,0.0,0.12828679842301174,0.0,0.06951306676703403,0.0,0.0,0.04978969528854048,0.15953498403153688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043254921377487265,0.11641992224651353,0.0,0.0,0.06593703061381853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069238568306546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041902521670697,0.0,0.0,0.14167613240823246
mentalhealth,MontyTLM,2020/02/16,"How do I get help for someone that I believe has undiagnosed mental illness? Without getting into all of the details,  I have a family member(adult, married) that is not even able to hold a job due to emotional issues. They have had issues as long as I can remember and it has gotten progressively worse over the years. They have threatened self harm and been Baker Acted only to be released. While I understand that there are no guarantees, how can our family get help that will work? The doctors keep prescribing Ambien and I believe that is part of the problem.",5.630898058252428,7.6469101844660194,6.157463592233013,73.84842839805826,68.51456310679612,9.033495145631068,32.29247572815534,9.516144504307137,3.3889621359223288,451,20,72,10,8,146,72,103,0.159,0.778,0.063,-0.89,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,2,2,4,2,0,0,6,0,15,2,0,2,1,14,21,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,3,0,9,0,11,16,2,7,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,4,59,15,3,0.17070036783284614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3846417194773521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17471905967083226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920149381705711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127459830400836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32184222969823423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26755169038439697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22883371669806415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35633366933922656,0.169393775575248,0.1517263301379671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510644539047562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202582162051308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12982532179005096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18485186373356172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333719842780028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19337024070662348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17807771201656633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14463386772113948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17770510298579753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645490631340323,0.0,0.12427190081388073,0.0,0.17395825816208255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992544025295388
mentalhealth,Ghost_Toast112,2020/02/16,"I feel like my life is just crumbling It all started about 10 months ago right before I graduated highschool when I couldn’t decide a career for my future. Now I am in my second semester, still lost at what I want to do in life, lost the only girl I ever loved for two years 4 months ago and saw her get a new boyfriend in a month, I’m pretty sure I’m starting to lose hair, I can’t hold down a job because I’m too socially anxious, and the only thing going ok is my grades

I’m beyond overwhelmed and have had high blood pressure for 8 months AT 18 YEARS OLD. I’m not even severely overweight I fact I actually lost 30 pounds from lack of eating in months past

I’m so stressed. I miss having friends, I miss being loved and I feel like I’ll never find someone like her again, I miss knowing my place in this world or at least feeling genuine happiness. I sit inside all day and try to contact old friends but they always flake. 

And I bet my ex is out there following her passion in the military, can get any guys she wants, and spends each weekend with her new boyfriend out doing something fun. 

I feel just like I’m always losing at life. Even in our relationship I felt like I was always the worst partner and less motivated one. I feel like I’m just a waste of space. somedays I wonder if a car accident would just end this but I would never do anything stupid on purpose.

I just can’t help but feel like things won’t get better considering most of my life has been short bursts of happiness followed by pummeling pain to keep me in my place.",3.719540372670808,4.886275949206349,4.510669427191171,87.11677018633543,72.04761904761905,7.256038647342996,26.71152518978606,7.586124646067393,1.3159289164941341,1224,41,255,14,23,394,182,315,0.11599999999999999,0.6779999999999999,0.20600000000000002,0.9806,2,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,1,7,17,32,1,3,10,1,21,12,2,1,7,52,58,15,0,7,11,1,8,7,3,3,6,0,0,3,6,12,2,2,12,1,2,4,7,14,0,3,8,9,38,18,32,45,8,56,0,9,1,3,19,24,0,5,34,149,44,6,0.0,0.0,0.07900245487888645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352717528020809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020883865184891,0.0,0.0,0.055053606562989285,0.0,0.0,0.09145848350743277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662079824343935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04935069891782561,0.0,0.06888853236316139,0.0,0.0,0.0715999791958466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0522106343866933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283932791218858,0.0,0.0,0.07170396441903146,0.0,0.0,0.10694280676286104,0.07323033505807637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24560606431385165,0.2891788548215929,0.07773151519358737,0.0,0.07399332599872133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509451478630068,0.0,0.1268902356977231,0.0,0.04600978761435735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016026058910397,0.0,0.1723606842767684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05426384001851313,0.08553562477204232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033743340432258,0.07195839340464116,0.0,0.0,0.04449190690930325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287295857416851,0.2768608605113568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811405817329284,0.2651227256537061,0.0,0.14613389349129194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230959384571261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248782182361185,0.15637775020146474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699017234860134,0.0,0.05485862856336401,0.12314305065914105,0.08614406609558015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728271584199116,0.0,0.0,0.1691658847729106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236247893182397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869176318808155,0.0,0.06913692410419052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145848350743277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252557191818734,0.06859469113665885,0.0623247335321661,0.0,0.0,0.11460370917741393,0.0,0.06465244748522675,0.0,0.092736088610593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07630111202400988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756860463931513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05496455915820346,0.0,0.07908332665780611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550119442018508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779452541967328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501920720256152,0.0,0.0,0.1042674408285984
mentalhealth,odxbaijxhs,2020/02/16,"Something is wrong with my mind So basically, I'm a grade 11 kid. Recently, I got this new war axe bc I love collecting those kind of stuff. When I hold on this axe, I immediately want to swing this on someone. I felt extremely guilty from this and don't know what to do. I'm going to refund this tmr, will the normal me be back when I refund it?",1.0757925636007857,2.9483618630136985,3.348375733855189,89.63082191780823,81.05479452054793,6.911154598825831,20.01761252446184,7.957251820313856,0.6604379647749514,268,7,62,5,7,92,54,73,0.17300000000000001,0.753,0.07400000000000001,-0.7501,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,8,13,4,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,9,2,0,1,2,0,2,1,1,2,0,0,2,1,8,2,8,9,0,8,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,5,37,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155285008626065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691258418170354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929732995296672,0.0,0.2241764221427853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918826840987909,0.15404204936943294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529759455087106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830166647311197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707093355868045,0.0,0.0,0.27462824655613505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767561458870171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23749188408790725,0.21578373116867225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208691480053643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16532444581104092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3064570844333769,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mentalhealthiswealth,2020/02/16,My girlfriend is in the hospital for an undiagnosed rash all over her body and swelling in her joints She's has about 10 injections and easily had blood taken 20 times in the last 2 days. She's so sick and miserable it's just so awful. She thinks I'm handling all of this well but driving to and from the hospital I'm having mini breakdowns and I haven't ate in 2 days and I haven't slept in the same time. I'm a wreck. Sleeping in the bed without her and seeing her go through all this pain is tipping my world upside down,1.9680000000000002,3.8528770727272783,3.2890909090909126,91.0736363636364,78.27272727272728,6.581818181818183,23.72727272727273,7.554174236665415,0.9651999999999998,418,14,91,6,10,136,71,110,0.165,0.804,0.031,-0.9424,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,7,1,7,8,5,0,3,15,16,10,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,3,7,1,0,1,0,0,2,3,2,1,0,4,1,11,1,15,12,4,16,0,1,1,0,8,9,0,0,5,59,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484484377163971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4046193039664732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828214940164785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557062361628077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337974387198692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499771776862537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31392515965097884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20100540286392704,0.0,0.0,0.365840364687354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820527243179713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3023942659356991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spilledmychips,2020/02/16,"When I found out habits are just the brains automations. I never understood before the point of “being kind to yourself” 
-“being intentional”
-“regular eating habits” 

I have to admit I have had a lot of therapy and tools in my belt to access from to alleviate and overcome most of my difficulty’s now.

But all of my efforts today restructure my brain starting at some tomorrow and further, and that which haunts me is just simply automation from early observations and experiences.

Never thought I could achieve this for myself in a million years. But here I am",7.002057142857144,8.705012920000001,7.445428571428575,67.12700000000001,64.8,10.514285714285714,34.285714285714285,10.608840637214634,4.140571428571429,452,20,70,12,7,148,73,100,0.021,0.924,0.055,0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,4,0,9,3,2,1,3,23,14,8,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,12,1,15,7,4,15,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,3,9,62,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19845503769598974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5207065358743317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862090647620774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386446826426393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281362049685649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557162631156464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24286518277593194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982772973476178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3597508998567321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204704998581954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507597596219267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667100766847908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18515249049716734,0.0,0.0,0.22106751279553025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15018754348705846
mentalhealth,soyfie,2020/02/16,just something i’ve wanted to say for a while now I feel like i have no right to be sad because other people are going through so much worse. i’m always thinking of how people at school and friends would be so much better off without me. i feel like i don’t belong anywhere and no one actually likes me or enjoys being around me. i’ve been cutting for a while now and my family was aware of it but i don’t think they still know i’m doing it. i’ve brought up the topic multiple times of going to therapy with my mother but i don’t think i’ll ever get help. i’ve stopped telling my mother about it because i just feel like i’m annoying her. i don’t like venting to my friends anymore because i feel as if they’re eventually going to get fed up with me being so sad all the time and leave. i feel like such a fucking burden and i’m always thinking about killing myself. i just don’t wanna be here anymore but then again i don’t want my family to suffer. i’m sorry,1.4363438937148705,3.248555189320392,3.4743433827286694,89.46424374041901,79.63106796116507,5.696065406234032,22.978027593254986,6.5966054737557815,0.5977999999999994,763,25,162,7,19,259,105,206,0.16899999999999998,0.6890000000000001,0.141,-0.7929,0,0,1,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,1,1,17,18,4,0,5,0,17,2,0,1,2,35,42,18,1,5,9,2,5,6,2,1,0,1,0,0,4,8,1,1,10,0,0,4,9,8,0,1,4,6,24,10,24,32,3,21,0,3,0,1,9,6,1,2,17,107,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.11312634158082605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19291822326159452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299334365612564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319806832423624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120009067410312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252648118475212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486104400880178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185680558737362,0.0,0.29307649963204474,0.3312681456154845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17912715283718045,0.10717104457677198,0.12113233838803532,0.0,0.19764900816192515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770226521229512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282541360438517,0.0,0.06370949695576217,0.0,0.0,0.1227481231654602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33981138931063315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17043682469132287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855396345630937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607359724154693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899954759695112,0.0,0.09218842799647912,0.0,0.11732256269473484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924493682256529,0.0,0.12976884937633826,0.0,0.0,0.0925780707632774,0.0969187169229759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013237960248764,0.0,0.13257064979738076,0.0,0.0,0.29712092990113764,0.0,0.0,0.13519391494275265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136751456115094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174782395328227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813775440630588,0.08234998610043309,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Parabola605,2020/02/16,"My cousin had his first manic episode. *My cousin has been one of my best friends for almost 20 years. He was the best man at my wedding.*

He's also one of the most calm, cool, and collected people I've ever met. His poise and awareness have always been admirable in my eyes. Most importantly he's never shown one sign of mental illness in the 20 years that we've grown up together.

Last week he was due to receive a promotion to CEO of his company, and during that meeting it started. Him and his girlfriend had to leave early. 

**He said they were going to the Amazon. He said the car didn't need gas. He said he didn't need money anymore, that we should all share. He threw his wallet out of the window.** 

His girlfriend, and sister eventually got him to our nearest mental health facility.

**He was taking pictures down off of the walls, he was dancing on tables. He was going into other patients rooms to steal their blankets, and to dump their trash bins on top of them. He stole an employees phone to call home. **

They're calling it a manic break. His workload has always been wild. He has never shied away from it, and cares deeply about his profession. He's someone who wants to be an impactful part of the community, and wants to make the world a better place. It appears he put too much on his plate. 

Those things he's done during this episode are not characteristic of the man that I know, so something is wrong. It appears to me that stress has eaten away at him, and maybe...just maybe triggered something permanent. I hope not, but I accept it as a possible outcome. 

I get to see him tomorrow. An hour visitation. I will go expecting nothing in particular. I'll be there to show him that I love him, and that I'll always be there to support him. Always, and forever. I'm very anxious to see him. His mother told me that he's more in touch with reality now. This eases the tension only slight of course, but I was happy to hear it. 

I don't know why I posted this to be completely honest. I've talked about it with my wife, and I've cried to her, because I'm scared. I also cried because I know he's alone right now, and could be scared himself. 

I thought some of you may have some experiences with behaviors or scenarios like this. Mostly it was just nice to type it out, but if you're reading I'd just like to leave you with this...

It's okay to not be okay.

It is OKAY to NOT be OKAY.

If you have a support system use it.

If you can't handle your work load dump it.

It is okay to not be okay.

If anyone has stories of their own, or may be able to add some context from their experiences I'd love to hear from you. Thank you for taking the time.

♥️",1.5219357271683904,3.8409455588785058,2.936320708312838,90.72805869814724,82.19626168224299,5.623544843416956,21.34858173471061,6.912458644323713,0.5096417445482873,2074,64,432,25,57,674,256,535,0.07200000000000001,0.778,0.15,0.9924,1,1,2,0,0,0,79.0,2,7,6,7,13,35,2,4,20,7,44,6,1,3,4,70,84,26,0,12,16,5,1,2,3,4,2,5,3,2,32,22,1,0,5,3,1,12,11,8,0,4,25,10,55,27,66,45,13,55,0,0,3,2,83,24,0,18,18,274,87,5,0.08540930417957597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552508078741779,0.08845828103161509,0.0,0.13660357938975046,0.28426953229644664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648820293102874,0.08470307958148618,0.059720171347595566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16048970555815958,0.0,0.0,0.104129438174738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17926359080228393,0.07553758883335111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744248978000522,0.0,0.08708047784280991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955003045227246,0.0,0.0,0.06819237956905795,0.0,0.1876362202586176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740337165274457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772576054053713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16709337649634218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264911050378406,0.0,0.0,0.06598701654220092,0.0,0.04462283629479802,0.0,0.1456202274703207,0.0,0.06830962284082959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091979247871647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078609642376867,0.19252498633907086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567249594111727,0.08483071049747233,0.08411096022270625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408161597924726,0.06961998233433055,0.0,0.18087224199238452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345334366309345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15417046324787576,0.0,0.05701137375398305,0.0,0.0858051258391203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17214498026056074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278566589248061,0.12665983366358385,0.13174584139975004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195253086197511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736266647667393,0.06495762451921434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248995335054787,0.0,0.059212057483809866,0.0,0.08923454442391393,0.0,0.0,0.09628615747870503,0.08179850409172587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08585994090857972,0.0,0.0,0.08543241715026334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293907910084828,0.2437314204259021,0.0,0.17101922651467585,0.0,0.1361203149024654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236702626768668,0.13150451015700934,0.0,0.0,0.060453145097579965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783606936978753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19384293247387355,0.0,0.0,0.12843433484797387,0.06864876345260176,0.0,0.0786334121866443,0.0,0.0,0.0567421465751853,0.0,0.0,0.06780544720672799,0.04980285211054072,0.0,0.0,0.0816122502789057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376621619135504,0.0,0.07047162073408877,0.10075324096776184,0.0,0.06851019200304588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706861245461738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06217899066263461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338166634317464,0.0,0.11000158327522687
mentalhealth,CallOfDoody3,2020/02/16,"Seperation anxiety? I’m 16 and i don’t like sleeping over somewhere if my mom isn’t there with me. It’s not like i can’t stay many hours without her but i always want her to be home before i go to sleep, i always want to know where she is or else i start overthinking and when i do sleepover  somewhere i cry/get upset at night because i would want to go back home to my mom. I only have this with my mom. This is also kind of effecting my life.

Is this normal or could i have seperation anxiety.",0.6285591766723826,2.6512913584905675,2.751200686106348,92.50126072041168,83.52830188679245,6.118696397941681,20.957118353344764,7.348242739294969,0.6159169811320759,388,12,87,6,11,131,64,106,0.071,0.847,0.08199999999999999,-0.2382,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,1,0,0,12,3,2,1,0,18,20,8,0,7,6,3,0,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,0,0,19,3,11,17,0,11,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,3,7,58,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032510019860634,0.250394316970199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23020736249460136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569665703088143,0.0,0.0917207670397254,0.0,0.12803281751107778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013235584431467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569241821649174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861063776371942,0.0,0.1710230292118282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018530467336523,0.0,0.14817561533614532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15668392189559316,0.08269045663520166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627637251824323,0.14701711306583642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254573082829193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5286608731972339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119920783347906,0.14742166314724325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443379029824108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30114305851430884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649839153091736,0.16037339625986968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662406915456688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14504083429042502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688450356586024,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,checheneren95,2020/02/16,"Im not sure if this is the right place to post this My girlfriend broke up with me about two months ago, been together for almost 3 years and it fucking sucks.
I know the right thing would be to let her go cuz she deserves better and all of that but it still fucking kills me inside out thinking about us not being together anymore... I truly love her with every single part of my body but she doesnt any more...
Ive tried the no ex contact shit but fail every time cuz I dont want to let her go just yet, but this lead to her blocking me 

Anyways all of this is causing me extreme stress, I’ve quit weed now after smoking for almost 10 years now but i feel so empty and almost suicidal which makes me wanna smoke all day long again(still staying strong). I have litterally cried every night since the break up and feel so alone without her. I feel like im never gonna stop loving her and probably wont cuz i truly went all in with my feelings for her.

Please help me, Im litterally shaking/consumed by depression",3.321626213592232,4.764070616504856,4.095327669902915,88.63289441747574,73.41747572815535,6.5092233009708735,25.010922330097088,6.9077264865688965,0.8900786407766987,801,25,165,7,16,256,128,206,0.23800000000000002,0.6629999999999999,0.098,-0.9879,0,1,1,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,0,5,10,15,5,1,4,0,13,6,2,6,6,45,30,16,2,4,10,1,4,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,9,9,0,2,6,0,0,4,8,9,0,1,2,4,27,6,23,21,7,29,0,3,0,4,16,7,4,4,16,109,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096779130427839,0.0,0.3279760261276982,0.113074804972315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424433957793067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827459105618292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655849091570512,0.0,0.12127141986564187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121552093016346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992618873015733,0.07041035657763389,0.0,0.09403428869708337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795503717229284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759598700182098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208133875292786,0.07799631826687611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018653954493052,0.0,0.0,0.12409600419694418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317927410491233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35379080795096685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207885581070116,0.0,0.06000101448875232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232824678979456,0.0,0.053338536816125035,0.0,0.0,0.09661851618126137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970736358534314,0.0,0.07287672666995855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714431648947568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420430031229087,0.0,0.0,0.1024555439618932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182284271754491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406709004351112,0.11984394128819675,0.0,0.0,0.10456171869192538,0.0,0.11771164533936294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612354707562428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18647371502145707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120689774234281,0.09031262936276163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11636852502883015,0.08718917007091118,0.0912771504437504,0.12506228172456518,0.0,0.0,0.11942229704303706,0.0,0.10289835716399116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253257787596466,0.06995643535016689,0.0,0.0,0.06366218881702837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412425179127698,0.0,0.10665040359557082,0.0,0.13132690537699215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439562774618343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120849415265344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052430661752542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755645461447558,0.0,0.0,0.14061326345519476
mentalhealth,QuantumOfSilence,2020/02/16,"My friend has frequent panic/anxiety attacks and dissociation episodes. How can I comfort her? I’ve never been quite good with people with mental health problems, but I’m really close to one, and I really would like to help out.

I don’t see her much in person, so we usually just talk over text. Sometimes she’d have a panic attack or something and I really don’t know what to do. 

Thanks for your advice. I hope I can calm her down easier.",2.2433333333333323,4.657846896551725,4.048965517241381,83.2509195402299,80.0344827586207,7.085057471264367,21.160919540229887,8.167268648758528,1.3082781609195409,348,10,66,7,9,117,66,87,0.141,0.606,0.253,0.9043,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,1,1,0,1,3,11,2,1,1,0,10,1,0,1,1,17,15,7,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,1,13,7,10,12,1,8,0,0,1,0,10,5,0,2,4,45,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17372172068963426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359989918373848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4044942228539633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13735014336908805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911099354179272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18896873980883533,0.0,0.0,0.11916024006379924,0.0,0.0,0.1765727693034567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770164268507388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685290923423636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17915749914178666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13068662084973606,0.0,0.13711265604017908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046636115230765,0.0,0.0,0.41716623586543533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12324825413767232,0.15522810303889056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17010867154411552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890878246039123,0.0,0.0,0.34166567980760004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166532862826295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13686149389854269,0.1758260936857151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14289049568251586,0.0,0.16367326488429776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19579635507742035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628774831940692,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dinch99,2020/02/16,"Am I insane? I've been passed between so many NHS services over the past 10 years, with at most 8 sessions at a place before being passed elsewhere.
The general consensus is that I'm too hard to diagnose but it's starting to make me feel insane.
So I'm starting to question my sanity, and if I'm making everything up.

I suffered a fair amount of abuse growing up, and a lot of emotional abuse from my parents ever since. As a result I'm very unable to properly connect to the experiences I have and the people I'm around.

My question is, am I broken and making it up, or am I ill? I don't know what to do anymore. I went to A&E last week because I thought I was going to kill myself and they discharged me because I'm on a waiting list so they can't help.

Am I making this up or am I hard to diagnose? I think I need reassurance...


TLDR: Am I insane or hard to treat?",2.6678021978021995,3.8919254505494494,4.910769230769231,83.00923076923078,74.71428571428571,7.397802197802199,28.384615384615394,7.957251820313856,1.87772087912088,680,28,138,10,14,238,103,182,0.248,0.698,0.054000000000000006,-0.9909,1,0,0,0,2,1,22.0,0,0,2,0,6,4,1,0,9,0,15,3,0,5,1,29,35,14,1,2,5,1,4,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,6,0,0,5,2,2,0,0,4,4,22,2,25,30,3,22,0,1,0,0,7,10,0,8,7,93,27,2,0.0,0.3234367815627064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14788691265255807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536145408943298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150508248388475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664061358157403,0.0,0.11614297997743875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27706905625547823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15353293571319812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346306484734318,0.0,0.0,0.12266845642758033,0.1335134597408525,0.0,0.0,0.06901347058163236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757044109300988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668048275123325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914864037390836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510060181547774,0.0,0.07501136221169649,0.1112576082123397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603895997390642,0.0,0.0,0.3644326741887218,0.13837948820974064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120564295973856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15155604853156102,0.0,0.1302951973388006,0.09462501529150384,0.0,0.14260305230825662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3058001874698295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290598019289726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932167204573868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745731311050065,0.0,0.10835785398165264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126185860270692,0.0,0.0,0.10948408552911107,0.0,0.0,0.12652764421521898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789511749658459
mentalhealth,BunnySmooch,2020/02/16,"[vent]: domestic abuse, suicidal thoughts, low self esteem I dunno what to write, I'm nervous.
I've been having problems with my family lately. I got a black eye. My body aches.

Now that my bruises are going purple, swollen, I'm forced to acknowledge my body which I hate, it all hurts, inside out.

I just dunno what to do",0.9304121863799252,3.5185085645161287,2.5127956989247338,89.31697132616492,92.38709677419355,5.336200716845879,19.7921146953405,6.937597516519254,0.7198867383512542,249,8,47,4,9,81,47,62,0.37799999999999995,0.622,0.0,-0.9786,0,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,1,1,0,4,4,3,0,1,10,10,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,3,3,8,0,5,7,1,5,0,2,3,0,2,2,0,2,2,26,13,0,0.0,0.3017836464036563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5658394300008248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401131032555649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475465933765494,0.0,0.2037107692162474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514683483299061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.272666853946718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28731821142222963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437181822183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26571275057993515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786058106810622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022072327894361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myrrycal,2020/02/16,"I can't stop hurting myself or people around me Hi I am 29(m).

After a series of traumatic events that occurred late 2017 throughout 2019 spanning health issues (GI issues caused by a mold infestation from Hurricane Harvey), being cheated on and dumped(5 yr relationship with a fiance), and abuse from a narcissistic mother (moved in with her for 7 months after my health and mental crashed from the break up), I am now riddled with 24/7 thoughts of pure negativity and self-loathing. My friends have pretty much alienated me because they are tired of my shit and when they do talk to me I find ways to sneak my complaints in, pushing them further away. I'm getting therapy and treatment and that has given me some improvement and I am just starting family counseling with my mother, but none of it seems to be taking the edge off my constant negative thoughts. I am scheduled to see a psychiatrist in March, I'm hoping that will do something for my quickly deteriorating mind. I wasn't like this prior to my last relationship as my ex also had strong bouts of depression, although admittingly I was not capable or ready to handle it, and often I made it worse. I guess this is just karma for me, but I don't think she battled with this constant barrage of negative thoughts. I want to die but I realize I'm too afraid to pull the trigger myself. I am often reading self-help books and trying to regain my health as much as possible, it has improved a bit, but I am still deathly afraid I might revert back to how I was. NO matter what I do it's just a constant flow of self hate in my mind, and I am grateful I can actually sleep now (had insomnia for 3 straight months right after the initial break up), sleeping is really the only enjoyable thing in my life. I can understand why young men have some of the highest suicide rates, and I keep holding strong at the idea that there is a light at the end of the tunnel, that's why I haven't done anything drastic yet. I am planning to move to San Diego this year as quickly as I can, not banking on that the move will fix anything, but I really enjoy SoCal and the city and hoping a place of my choosing will give me a bit more hope to grip onto. End of my vent, thanks for reading!",9.207207973744985,6.922748191685913,8.94038896317005,71.55495441837853,61.3094688221709,11.610015801628785,39.41764920384101,9.93914555978268,3.7989565819861433,1769,72,331,27,19,574,230,433,0.136,0.74,0.124,-0.8597,0,0,1,0,1,3,44.0,0,0,3,3,19,18,4,2,21,0,37,9,3,4,1,64,62,30,3,4,12,3,1,1,1,4,6,0,0,2,17,20,0,3,11,3,1,6,11,8,0,0,11,3,53,10,61,45,8,57,1,2,1,0,17,20,1,12,29,240,70,3,0.0,0.09944949986843606,0.08190865815330739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712295792572089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381430538478287,0.07472013310367852,0.0,0.0,0.0788598937291094,0.06454099626106408,0.0,0.051166125577792314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18327102280405255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622458273292596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721124337396793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229327425788452,0.0,0.08711149737533097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589486255370422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14868336734191734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912664690479652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671526225541668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484813582181044,0.0,0.04385268345855355,0.08051830266726437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246409787511513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286864371934978,0.0,0.2676576129724882,0.0,0.0,0.05626000266670196,0.0,0.0,0.2500998101353446,0.0,0.0,0.08985437938353596,0.09475263660973404,0.0,0.17521310649961724,0.0,0.07460547214232388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841839966262743,0.09468257398817127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05928592180073584,0.041006504371867473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942152613323697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845869509332978,0.08904199471813486,0.16950127177726912,0.0,0.13399256929105596,0.2676295378314488,0.12340407561401145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383651024425717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819010689084985,0.0,0.08769443081425818,0.0,0.0,0.09462433892500743,0.0,0.08539228485783025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16791585015524205,0.0,0.107542090923418,0.0,0.0,0.18023000951387844,0.0,0.07168021159472504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688549605252593,0.07641146372425119,0.2626881920416833,0.0,0.08615828792804861,0.0,0.0,0.16799165604611707,0.0,0.0,0.06461742614464593,0.0,0.0,0.05940977437033134,0.0,0.06703076794209029,0.0701735947805697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918114976171092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310883281924701,0.0674639432065642,0.0,0.07727626525364703,0.0959872288246608,0.0,0.05576282457891469,0.05378229406472286,0.0,0.19990554568147936,0.0,0.09647117769625056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05698649862891431,0.0,0.0,0.08737951480339777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049507162144438815,0.06662386364318852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15147694531269693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553715081249988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05405152397126529
mentalhealth,ennyg123,2020/02/16,"My mental health is deteriorating...rapidly Not sure where to begin but I feel my mental health slipping away. I think it started around 7 years ago but the last 2-3 years its gotten much much worse and I dont know what to do or where to go for help. I constantly catch myself getting mad or upset over small things but now moreso than before I just go into this uncontrollable fit of rage, I try and distance myself from those around me during those moments I wouldn’t hurt them physically but verbally and emotionally. I’m even in my head screaming at myself to calm down and relax to take it easy and take some deep breaths but I dont even seem to listen to myself which is why I’m lost. I dont know what I’d need to do to help myself because if i cant even listen to myself to calm down why would I listen to someone else? Theres so much more to my story as is the case with everyone but this is the biggest problem at the moment i really wish I could change about myself.",3.9324520255863575,4.838710706467662,5.0381414356787495,84.51324626865673,71.28855721393035,7.334896943852168,23.80987917555082,7.447530270364453,0.9186983653162764,776,19,160,8,14,256,117,201,0.16399999999999998,0.71,0.126,-0.8626,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,1,12,12,2,2,4,0,13,4,2,0,1,33,34,16,0,7,11,0,1,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,11,9,0,0,5,1,0,3,6,8,0,0,2,5,26,4,30,29,5,29,0,2,0,0,6,16,0,5,10,113,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868858577073774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21830224581203173,0.0,0.0,0.11519848259421275,0.0,0.0,0.07474344369564978,0.0,0.10433420909672424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297077701887097,0.0,0.0,0.13250055670253538,0.0,0.09789610646394108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4311028205466763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242701284721548,0.13792256252634846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429532052598995,0.0,0.0,0.11716150092657528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06199656553976295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06405997210017741,0.0,0.13936702196371006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258358016427968,0.2606627138431637,0.0,0.0,0.1643691522135056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13125922024425934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347692499563132,0.0999455547040602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338460309031025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24712912822985825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704028927335741,0.0909156172536726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117323606057279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785487090050034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162181760063958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10388917578108417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867857606077453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155608328866464,0.0,0.1843786856736667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145829867238387,0.07856514095713046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324584094620557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22127742535351635,0.0,0.14099832717803332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495261549401533,0.08710040410752616,0.0,0.0,0.15791686366668398
mentalhealth,Devil__Dude,2020/02/17,"I dream about being violently murdered? I’ve had several dreams in the past few months where I’m violently murdered or maimed. Shot, stabbed, shot and stabbed, crushed to death, exploded, etc. These dreams always seem so real and I legitimately fear for my life. My dream last night had me being kidnapped by a cult and about to be sacrificed before I stabbed a guy with a fork and ran for my life.

Along with these dreams, I frequently get sleep paralysis. I used to see/hear dark figures or “demonic” presences. I even had a conversation inside my head with some raspy voice during a bout of sleep paralysis. 

I just find it odd that they occur more frequently. Is this something I should be concerned about?",4.420820512820517,6.977569876923081,4.428846153846155,82.60532051282053,73.30769230769229,8.025641025641027,28.52564102564104,8.841846274778883,2.426333333333333,564,23,103,12,12,174,86,130,0.255,0.6629999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.981,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,7,5,4,1,6,0,9,5,3,1,0,18,14,7,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,5,8,0,0,3,5,0,1,0,5,0,0,4,1,14,0,15,5,4,9,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,4,6,63,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17258730630379618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649633074821192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313244433990496,0.13699677105948607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334014474987243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18957510184400836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836666249161343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20537513836429305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128693691071528,0.0,0.2337736902017673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16907229021603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930090918771993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16555802732655542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946465177571132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198002705362646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360856085574756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528425183281345,0.18882436938487904,0.0,0.2343218268863836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4151329783355805,0.0,0.0,0.15967950551331142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914142885229042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TrueSilent69,2020/02/17,"Recommendations I'm at a point where I have zero real freinds or people who give a crap about me because of various reasons.

Can anyone recommend good way to meet new people other online or irl just to really chat and nothing more. The loneliness I have experienced over the last 2 ish months is finally starting to kill me.",6.424836065573771,7.5134884918032805,7.57389344262295,67.92346311475413,65.72131147540983,10.69016393442623,33.2827868852459,10.686352973137794,3.9290622950819682,262,11,43,7,4,89,51,61,0.11199999999999999,0.7659999999999999,0.122,-0.0931,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,4,0,4,1,1,1,0,6,7,3,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,4,1,7,7,2,10,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,2,5,29,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18191696385124145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585972613007796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28500359726028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495788403638277,0.0,0.2182183130120588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878396376657905,0.0,0.0,0.21207333341230264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20766526959234874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512738771098896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496402012573247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607383394178274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24594481278151106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29613050082590603,0.1666716103907651,0.26749816565285395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841497163060816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20651089352117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rstewart12,2020/02/17,"Gratitude is Her Mantra Matana Jacobs is a mom, wife, traveler, and entrepreneur who found herself in the middle of a breakdown a few years ago. Since then, she has become committed to sharing her own journey of mental health as well as helping others navigate their journey to healing. Her podcast is Hope to Recharge and her daily mantra is gratitude. Her latest episode is with Dr Rick Hanson, discussing rewiring your brain for mental health. [https://hopetorecharge.com/episode/rewiring-your-brain-for-mental-health-with-dr-rick-hanson/](https://hopetorecharge.com/episode/rewiring-your-brain-for-mental-health-with-dr-rick-hanson/)",19.521153846153844,23.68768060256411,10.009384615384617,51.08561538461538,37.846153846153854,9.82974358974359,39.95897435897436,9.888512548439397,4.40729435897436,549,19,53,7,5,129,58,78,0.0,0.784,0.21600000000000005,0.9493,0,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,6,5,1,0,1,6,8,5,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,9,3,10,7,2,9,0,0,0,0,15,2,0,1,4,37,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123044811557256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510418710615669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4580117936721237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995146820920788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5814825426633851,0.0,0.0,0.09166807092904906,0.0,0.0,0.1358346133910249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5512920192173948,0.0,0.0,0.1601729271498327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313018085347233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229646376865326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806965336590161
mentalhealth,any580,2020/02/17,"Constant tiredness and struggling to get moving I often feel fatigued, sleeping eight hours a night I assume I should be feeling rejuvenated and full of energy but I’m not. I force myself to workout and diet and while it’s been going well I struggle with other areas such as laying around and being lazy most of the time. Sometimes when I have a stressful day of work and have bad social anxiety it’ll seem like I just woke up with how groggy I am even if it’s late afternoon. I don’t know what to make of this and am struggling to fix it.",4.00644495412844,5.277338577981652,5.096227064220184,82.79278096330276,71.4770642201835,6.917889908256881,26.469036697247706,7.1686216300943375,1.3190633027522929,431,14,82,4,8,142,79,109,0.21600000000000005,0.708,0.076,-0.9520000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,8,8,0,4,3,0,10,3,1,2,0,24,19,13,0,2,4,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,7,10,1,0,5,1,0,2,2,6,1,1,2,2,10,2,13,13,2,15,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,5,10,63,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554499365156875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936779772615473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15885545763022454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055986863783428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269910602689744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256620125377617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19239786989816016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940068510653847,0.0,0.10812662736401983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873634167015168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455948806848422,0.0,0.2146165748549878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294926346389518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699707326025528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20221156621908987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178541968293583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732015294198032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19039297468475594,0.19394159863532973,0.0,0.0,0.18816762788849534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21793711765070856,0.5966893057811896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093955541827516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17106261014740726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13850832408471214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LeeIsLearning,2020/02/17,"I’m drowning and need help! (20f) For the past 2-3 years I’ve been suffering from severe depression. I cannot afford professional help by any means. So I tried doing other things to help cope such as journaling, exercise/diet change, meeting new people, distancing myself from people, new job, started new hobbies, but nothing seems to work. It’s gotten worse within the past year, so much so that I question my motivation to live. How do I get over this? How get my will to live again? How do I know I’m truly happy or if it’s a mind placebo? In the past I’ve done self harm and that oddly enough made me feel better by making me feel something in some kind of form. But I know that doesn’t just hurt but it hurts my loved ones too. Please! How do I not go back to my old ways again? HELP!!!",1.3261636828644503,3.5718944844720504,2.7619145049324096,92.12918523931313,82.41614906832298,5.527365728900256,18.78735842162952,6.794906146795322,0.09748856412130102,616,15,131,7,17,200,107,161,0.128,0.6759999999999999,0.196,0.9277,2,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,3,13,9,0,0,4,0,9,1,0,7,0,26,26,15,1,2,7,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,9,2,0,0,8,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,4,2,14,4,16,21,4,19,0,4,0,1,8,4,0,5,13,78,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401930876545191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500353592374924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927132907764807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13070118555359933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641479177394954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643615892259247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766180591440365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494277874809633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291011986073365,0.0,0.07021720815657415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152295058730898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3312560694164982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645290359368002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260587532805595,0.0,0.0,0.12865995426737958,0.13580143055294572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21819661119023265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115101215421249,0.11690748901051393,0.08247163668917308,0.0,0.0,0.13458388716444045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124751871641991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908246247339498,0.09161192843808988,0.0,0.3579806473675147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855106982990145,0.0,0.1296465958957757,0.0,0.08372174575776332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3538318796861236,0.17131021306365313,0.0,0.0,0.13562252912483033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384060417559194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247671494796163,0.12889123985851406,0.13957811385597527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511603975249626,0.0,0.0,0.08745044174377853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208217745297798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388341028641398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806949055143513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994701916422464,0.0,0.12590961173205342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912632890159958
mentalhealth,Lifeiscruel-,2020/02/17,"Have your say!! Mental health drop ins. This survey takes less than 4 minutes 
Have your say on mental health drop-ins. 
For any age not just Young people. 
[
Mental health drop ins. Have your say! ](https://www.surveymonkey.co.uk/r/XK7NX6F)",3.712115384615384,6.473907487179487,1.742019230769234,91.2561057692308,102.33333333333334,2.9756410256410257,12.567307692307693,5.148860815047168,-1.2491307692307694,188,3,32,1,8,51,25,39,0.133,0.867,0.0,-0.6219,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,5,4,1,7,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207863974489492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6193514924292767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5871948163786948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346501194089759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4633629666581234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460319000755938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MonaLynn101,2020/02/17,"The Age Issue I won’t disclosed the username, but after my controversial post about incels I had quite a lot of incels that messaged me. 

One of them that message me basically said that young people can’t have mental disorders or experienced trauma which of course isn’t true. He was very dissmive. 

How I got onto that’s topic is a little of a long story, but long story short is that post is very indirect and effective way of describing guys I encounter during my time on the internet. 

Back on that topic, I am almost an adult, and what I experienced throughout the years felt like hell.

At three year old I was kidnapped by crackhead neighbors. At 9, I starting have weird thoughts about blood and cut myself just to see it. From fifth grade to seventh grade I was bullied and didn’t have many friends. At 15...there some extremely heavy stuff, but I was sexually harassed by creepy, older guys. Also, my boyfriend threatened to rape me because I broke up with him for not respecting certain wishes that I had. One of those wishes were not to have sex. Also, two guys I liked when I was 15 killed themselves. One of them I do blame myself for. 

At 16, I lost my home due to natural disaster, along with developing more mental health issues. I lost a giant part of me, my home which resembles my privacy and need for piece, so I was scared of losing other things. I became so paranoid that all of my friends and family hated me, so I slowly pushed them away one by one. Right now, I have nobody in real life that I’m close to anymore. I’m scared of real relationships and attachment that I just either watch shows, work, or focus on hobbies that I’ll never be good at. And that’s my fault I’m alone. I attacked  people or ignored them to the point that they just move on from me.

Even now with me realizing that things  I did was my fault, and trying to reach out to more people...I still haven’t got my shit together and don’t think I’m ever will. All I care about is my success now which doesn’t mean shit anymore which I have nobody that will be proud of me, and encourage me even when the light at the end of the tunnel seems so dim.

Imagine only academics and career being your only reasons to live. Not friends, not families, and worried about still being to hurt to even find a long-term partner in the future. Who will be there for me? No one, that’s who. 

For those who says young people can not  experience trauma are fucking dumb as shit. We can be abused, kidnapped, trafficked, suicidal, bullied, raped, assaulted, groomed, and more. If we have emotions, then we can go through almost anything.",4.93708333333333,6.072250763888893,5.337904761904763,82.44042857142861,69.1388888888889,7.902857142857143,28.090476190476192,8.146662555663855,1.8145847619047621,2051,69,390,27,35,654,254,504,0.273,0.638,0.08800000000000001,-0.9990000000000001,0,1,0,0,1,1,67.0,3,1,5,8,28,40,14,2,15,0,44,10,4,3,6,67,67,32,2,4,16,0,1,2,5,4,2,2,3,5,31,23,0,1,10,1,0,3,14,27,0,8,19,8,59,13,62,38,10,54,1,5,2,4,29,22,6,10,28,281,90,6,0.0,0.09168010163045022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15496548302330335,0.08014011867201899,0.0,0.1237580804832116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534760741534123,0.0,0.0,0.06367537912741875,0.0,0.0,0.08802847721262187,0.07269903902197422,0.059498791893099076,0.0,0.047168820348157545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889187701765009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886817220274326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703966865981451,0.06853380985674994,0.0,0.0,0.15332202431797012,0.06999269704652804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569038684427573,0.1458899047155676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429487233122142,0.0,0.07072195485636129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17934580939735142,0.0715345772696324,0.0,0.0,0.04397561643153576,0.06490087104103866,0.12377227359750315,0.0,0.0,0.22984871625130365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639460920586161,0.0,0.08224903826211445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15523258900306594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283459086995562,0.0,0.0,0.16152474805929282,0.0,0.0,0.08560712869049834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05465426516108091,0.07560581990449045,0.07755293553626118,0.06832606089212792,0.20543089208713974,0.0,0.08656602383431558,0.16893413184679998,0.06578388266231835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844899693437671,0.0,0.08428716485866727,0.0,0.0,0.15595735058363952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224041099639268,0.0,0.057374696763268465,0.05967856961038773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119503925667204,0.0,0.31459941017981796,0.11769868636180625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379267323579684,0.0,0.16093217926779424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314708081655448,0.0,0.14821318589181395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230087016762765,0.0,0.17614587135368667,0.0,0.0795573190586938,0.0,0.0830748551322465,0.0,0.06608026277246591,0.07360405654597242,0.06153397358328435,0.1549374569372952,0.0,0.06166012985294951,0.07044189029847735,0.0,0.0,0.2382817592043857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05476844186566696,0.0,0.12358810502672875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885791279839012,0.08463881109020986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028128131636478,0.049580603143259364,0.0,0.06142937125145361,0.04511964772317115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253448225254044,0.0,0.07558691790501333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768966303156914,0.0,0.061418937228455636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17796142203810392,0.0,0.0,0.05633199777903165,0.07858096465670064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965759943533133
mentalhealth,Youwrites,2020/02/17,"I diagnosed myself with Histrionic Personality Disorder? Here is how. Does that work? Hello there! I hope you are doing great! 

in 2018, my girlfriend left me because she said I was narcissistic and I didn't love her. I had doubts about who I was and since then I got interested in personality disorders and mental disorders. But I have recently discovered histrionic personality disorder and everything flashed back  at me and made I am so confused. I remember all the things I have been doing in my adult life, the people I am surrounded by, the decisions I have made, all made me bewildered. I am suffering from many types of addiction and I have nihilistic and suicidal thoughts. That has been before I knew that but the tendency of having those thoughts increased when I realized that. Yet I am not certain of this and I want to listen to a second hand opinion, to which I am posting here. I can't go to a therapist because I can't trust anyone, at least therapists in my region. Mental health therapy in my country is of very low quality. 

 There is a key term in HPD, ""pervasive"" excessive emotionality and attention-seeking. That's what I have always rooming in my mind. I thrive when I am being the center of attention and when I realized that I started to reduce seeking attention by not posting personal pictures on social media and being reserved about the things I did, but now I realize, because I repressed that it made me even more uncomfortable. There are symptoms that don't match with, so let me detail on that by examining each of the symptoms: 

1. HPD is uncomfortable in situations in which he or she is not the center of attention. I relate to that. It explains why I've always felt happy when I had a group conversation and I was the one speaking the most, or when I teach (I am a teacher) or when I am invited to speak at an event. I feel the opposite when I am not the life of the party. 
2. interaction with others is often characterized by inappropriate sexually seductive or provocative behavior. That doesn't line up with me. I wear casual minimalistic clothes. I have a deep desire of wanting to attract women but I don't provoke. 
3. displays rapidly shifting and shallow expression of emotions. That happens very often. I can be very happy in a moment and if I meet someone, watch a video or get affected by something my mood changes. 
4. consistently uses physical appearance to draw attention to self. I do that by constantly adjusting my posture and if I am around women, I have the thought that they are looking at me and they would find me attractive. 
5. has a style of speech that is excessively impressionistic and lacking in detail. That's not me, too. I have joined a debate club years ago and I learned from that how to be precise in my speech and how to organize my ideas logically. But I think when I speak I try to impress, either by using jargon words or by using many examples or stating that I have done a lot of research on the topic. But I try to control that all the time, so I add words like ""I don't know"", ""I think that"". The tendency is there but I can control it sometimes
6. shows self-dramatization, theatricality, and exaggerated expression of emotion. I relate to that, too. I play the guitar and I try singing different genres. I speak with exaggerated analogies and I laugh so loud and try to exaggerate my emotions and what happened. 
7. is suggestible, i.e., easily influenced by others or circumstances. That's me, so many times.
8. considers relationships to be more intimate than they actually are. I can remember I did that many times in the past and I considered some people my best friends while they live far from me and I have never shared a secret with them. 
9. I have also read that HPD people change professions and are easily bored. I have tried dozens of occupations and I have tried to learn dozens of skills but failed to succeed in any. 

I hope you've made it here. What are your thoughts?",3.949818840579713,6.429748804054058,5.4315276145710945,75.22300626713671,74.47297297297297,9.046611829220524,30.454367410889148,9.580615224786511,3.3477810419114764,3145,146,550,88,69,1056,329,740,0.068,0.813,0.11900000000000001,0.9931,1,0,1,0,0,0,92.0,0,2,5,7,35,28,0,3,32,0,71,10,2,17,6,133,105,65,1,9,24,0,3,1,2,1,7,9,1,8,40,37,0,3,29,8,0,3,13,7,0,4,24,14,103,20,78,74,15,63,0,3,2,1,42,31,0,21,27,427,143,9,0.0,0.0,0.062340200911771365,0.06964146173639159,0.0,0.0,0.056628069070663985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05108689090046888,0.10631087887764036,0.0,0.0,0.04344235757377191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04466819818076945,0.0,0.0,0.056869056518044414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04912177497072272,0.0,0.1168267172351803,0.0,0.05435938610540904,0.0,0.0670408458303525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351586372600606,0.0,0.0,0.06903439421577888,0.14329953241897814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648394927088084,0.0,0.06674371866246402,0.2928599694107725,0.0,0.05590409240099435,0.06537407777898863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874372995751243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042193853785214605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05741356031330268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032300961233730975,0.0,0.061337312641403664,0.0,0.0583875376526211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0493555370949788,0.0,0.033376021033206894,0.0,0.036305952874301314,0.0,0.051092749767045684,0.07043079031671726,0.0,0.0,0.11298234166796145,0.1360084278846347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790421486757195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689966899999972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211567783365484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03510820543394344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940863013409054,0.06532428509378325,0.09024433703650417,0.031209810768074782,0.0,0.056409504814975635,0.0,0.05364529345460985,0.0,0.0,0.054310700739011536,0.0576565392444609,0.3022362963508986,0.0,0.2590677122327467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875726778056135,0.0,0.0645032135529438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0492701981620586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04328850200449055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06098316868739018,0.13286445058823929,0.2231192836000611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236374106809388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638998859885852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307635911546029,0.0685860033404293,0.1447330617515005,0.0,0.0607669800939766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328696492115807,0.0,0.0,0.05284434558255351,0.07180671723396391,0.0,0.06512026419464538,0.05412751835997743,0.04917994530833511,0.06318152334104947,0.0,0.0452164319849734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987719413921438,0.0,0.0,0.13279695999965435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305531875145121,0.14834524110302924,0.08488151963497978,0.0818667792412226,0.0,0.2028625896558328,0.11175137065965994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26023254590270345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16552216225415736,0.0,0.15812950214502533,0.07535922341394959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057644108798732815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04650729250981292,0.0,0.0,0.045380365057723186,0.0,0.0,0.04113829892865902
mentalhealth,NoobN4,2020/02/17,"I just broke down in tears on a work site and idk whats wrong Im electrician in Australia on a big work site andjust a got a strange feeling and just started sobbing idk whats wrong my parents are fine works fine my relationship is fine this has never happened before and idk what to do 
Im afraid when i ask for help all I’m going to get is man up and get on With  it but this isn’t what i want to hear...",0.8369999999999997,2.344689088888892,2.5641666666666687,96.71625000000002,80.33333333333333,5.388888888888888,22.36111111111111,5.985473137389443,0.0431111111111111,318,10,78,2,8,105,56,90,0.168,0.7290000000000001,0.10300000000000001,-0.5423,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,3,3,8,0,1,4,0,6,0,0,0,2,12,17,6,0,1,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,7,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,1,2,5,3,12,16,1,14,0,2,0,0,6,10,1,0,3,44,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18903410674822324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17206131378923314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224077615140352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112872289210502,0.0,0.11491759560729613,0.0,0.16172157707917265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17880895586897635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22789940218562174,0.0,0.135533553764995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43683156720248295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595273666227272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22452439939211755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170921838488669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312153336518044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192655759724472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4416223079396949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4421582120717765,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pinkishdolphin,2020/02/17,"Having a hard time being honest with my therapist. Any advice? So I've been seeing the same therapist for almost 7 years now. I originally started therapy for an eating disorder but I also had depression and severe social anxiety. I was definitely reluctant to tell my therapist things at because I was afraid she would tell my parents or something but over the years I've really learned to trust her. 

Now in therapy we focus more on my anxiety and being successful in college/life stuff. I tend to get in a weird cycle of skipping class, getting anxious about missing class, and then missing more class because going back makes me anxious. However recently I've had a harder time telling my therapist what I'm struggling with. Maybe because it's so embarrassing and feels really inexplicable to me. I don't know why I keep doing this over and over again. I know it makes me feel bad and do bad in school but it keeps happening. I've been having the same issue for like 2 years now and I feel like my therapist is done with my shit. A couple weeks ago she asked if I should do a medical withdraw for the semester and I'm afraid if I tell her how much of a problem I'm having she'll push me to do that. I don't want to take a semester off because I'd have to explain it to my family and I don't even know what I'd do other than stay at home and feel bad about myself. And I don't want my therpaist to be mad at me for not following through and going to class because I feel bad enough already.

In my regular life I have a tendency to lie about little things just because it's what the other person wants to hear and I'm noticing that it's starting to creep into therapy. Last week I lied and said I went to all of my classes when I missed one. It's such a stupid thing to do because really the only person I'm hurting is myself but it's still really hard. I just don't want to admit to continuing to have the same stupid problem with a really obvious solution that I for some reason am not doing.

tldr: I like my therapist who I've been seeing for a while but now am having trouble being honest with her. What do I do? Any advice to tell the truth?",4.524139509192776,5.230395631578951,6.083235224493017,78.28828375286044,69.80091533180779,9.414313895683737,29.485441489781426,9.581879112588783,2.668375428075436,1709,63,332,37,29,585,189,437,0.221,0.703,0.076,-0.9964,2,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,0,1,20,29,4,4,20,0,40,4,1,5,3,67,82,29,0,10,12,1,7,3,0,3,2,2,1,2,23,21,1,2,12,0,0,5,7,21,0,1,10,11,49,8,53,65,9,45,0,5,2,0,22,15,1,5,27,236,72,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305188074054532,0.05919894494290302,0.0,0.06687335250720773,0.0,0.07369650807937371,0.05340620104752389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09082922220040564,0.0,0.10217735670873176,0.1508911666142021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624329263831755,0.0,0.0,0.051351870189335916,0.223043477514176,0.2849713319722953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389392566468257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05751994933943309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653890327557522,0.0,0.0,0.06834201650602084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833550235496046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690045104291097,0.0,0.04410942608766814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295690391788722,0.0,0.1688370146695577,0.04770966354438075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978253943613835,0.0,0.07590843694929446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059055831619259924,0.0,0.1196485874842077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752690974352879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06698861864256224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149239542852089,0.0,0.0,0.06970391860736283,0.0,0.11871928674202868,0.0,0.0,0.11010628234213476,0.054436915783354585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047170684320581864,0.09788014493477502,0.06693393515645359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915610856765582,0.0,0.06709232396315934,0.0,0.0,0.06727667030693807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049093060526466316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603268892881962,0.0,0.0,0.04525377059257965,0.05079134778371735,0.0,0.0,0.07415442397992827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11662437376292747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12780428866998148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21391393892693505,0.06866386679336038,0.06593998297585127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352575971539523,0.0,0.0,0.06758778429396532,0.10643453029282456,0.0,0.0,0.07544558330710105,0.06855161019703225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807667995734659,0.0,0.051412681420764786,0.0,0.0,0.09453845456933124,0.07118160574303863,0.053332850334854284,0.0,0.0,0.06981590882592911,0.07645035700702092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05021237319650023,0.0,0.2918556632364808,0.0,0.2291159418038769,0.4652400428650319,0.1331026244583071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788320465503716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756096194116687,0.0,0.10713830792031682,0.0,0.0,0.0619083478701477,0.06026111218449996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04744060280756974,0.0,0.0,0.12901784927277318
mentalhealth,mandelbrot31415926,2020/02/17,"question on Cymbalta my doctor somehow really wants me to try  Cymbalta . I am not depressed, I am however have anxiety and issues dealing with stress. I would hate it if  Cymbalta  damages my body in other ways and/or hard to get off later on. But other than that I don't mind trying something just to see what it does. 

How much risk is there?

Thanks!",2.7581023454157787,5.329463402985073,4.1697228144989325,82.2155223880597,79.14925373134328,7.410660980810236,25.989339019189767,8.418075326091056,2.1960891257995736,276,11,49,6,7,91,55,67,0.2,0.725,0.075,-0.8069,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,2,0,0,6,2,1,1,0,12,11,4,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,2,7,1,9,10,1,6,0,2,1,0,2,4,0,3,1,37,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777822078905398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581394266604097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395899421321623,0.20016222616654414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378670249984539,0.2033711958557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214172526358294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081810563426825,0.2294428129938825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425609146254309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346535846195841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17083770756330854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603365657249388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887874803573842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18518942357444898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890969801874707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266208689046349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21395889786136493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3155630878278051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13707310794459113,0.1844650280338144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650873614754048,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myadultisnotworking,2020/02/17,"(tw) I can't stop my sister from cutting herself Please this is full of triggers if you will lie triggered please don't read this I can't handle the guilt if I triggered anyone.

I don't know what to do,  I tried everything. My heart is breaking everyday.
By no mean I'm trying to make this about me I'm just sharing my feelings.

My sister is 16 yo, she is the most affectionate person I know,  every feeling she has is multiplied by 100.
Two years ago we discovered scars on her forearm and we all freaked out. I cried and called her names and handled the situation very badly.
After that we had a talk and she told something I will never forget (I try to replace the mental pain with physical pain).
We agreed she will stop and we will support her when she slips just don't hide anything from us and don't lie to us.
Only to find out year later that she stopped cutting her arms and started cutting her thighs
I will never forget the sight of the fresh wounds all over her thighs.
You should know that my sister is slightly overweight, and she doesn't like to get out of the house because she think she is ugly plus she has terrible anxiety and paranoia tendency.
We decided to give her the year off and take a break from school last year 
She got really better and stopped cutting but once we started the school this year (home schooling because we didn't think she is ready for the outside world yet) the very least things triggered her into cutting again. 
The studying and the isolation from everyone made her case worst
Now we are in the second term of this year,  and we are trying to get her back to school because she is becoming very dependent, spoiled and more depressed but she keeps crying and sleeps all day.  
What should we do I'm very scared if we made her go to school she will start cutting again 
(we are trying to convince her with therapy but she doesn't want too) 
Should we force her to go to school or therapy? 
I don't want to stand their watching her ruining her life because we are afraid of her cutting herself 
Please tell me what to do",3.4262553041018395,5.460981363861389,3.690922206506368,89.15959405940596,74.47029702970299,6.4983309759547385,26.394342291371995,7.33818517376401,1.276846902404526,1637,60,323,19,35,506,187,404,0.142,0.782,0.077,-0.9771,0,1,1,0,0,0,28.0,17,2,1,1,10,24,7,3,16,0,38,11,6,8,5,83,67,24,0,8,9,3,2,1,0,9,5,0,1,1,12,37,1,5,10,1,0,2,13,18,0,2,6,4,72,6,40,52,9,43,0,2,2,0,65,10,0,6,29,222,84,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663872664019088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05750920856020029,0.0,0.0,0.05256460085834362,0.0,0.06186319982997754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780547682581575,0.06276857358387179,0.18330564804982075,0.08302565991754171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648680198380975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676279995290287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16515396392712434,0.04848211059422392,0.0,0.06474872456063308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06333877376423923,0.07183360771175416,0.06756307629673919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602219045060446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870923244745641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855240619960825,0.07211538632065474,0.08544817115283103,0.0,0.060124878720006665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890835723821449,0.0,0.0,0.07540736156752847,0.0,0.0,0.08674267028687234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681962071917738,0.0,0.0,0.12394380436073668,0.06127823314285179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053098823651363626,0.03672705219156494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226613948738753,0.05018036683654997,0.0,0.0,0.08188838125831774,0.0,0.0,0.07575942912568462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159602762627258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005967235561756,0.0,0.057174511199659,0.1599845008030197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564052594405967,0.0,0.2475610477490903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519604861361312,0.0,0.04815948160707025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752639952129719,0.45649096139728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450064215879323,0.0752299959952937,0.0,0.0,0.057873930461801164,0.0,0.0,0.15962925277911627,0.0,0.0,0.25140102210163995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530849916181843,0.0,0.0,0.0565227744282285,0.060423384074067,0.06570687967350017,0.0,0.17193994059076909,0.0,0.04994339800551041,0.09633911260440434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183360771175416,0.0,0.2551968451612942,0.0,0.07343574032802941,0.0,0.18085423394964076,0.0,0.0,0.24811131864758726,0.08868115708894635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904641357269456
mentalhealth,Agonzalez444,2020/02/17,"To Medicate or not to medicate; that is the question So I have been doing therapy since I was 13. I am now 25. I have always believed I can overcome my shit without meds. That doing intensive and consistent therapy would help and going to college for psychology learned that most psych meds really aren't supposed to be taken for your whole life. Over the years my health care professionals have always recommended or suggested I take something to help me but I have always refused. I agreed for a short period of time but the meds made me feel stunted, muted and not myself. I don't like putting chemicals in my body (I legit have to have a fever to even take tylenol) and on top of that I've seen my father take fist-fulls of anti depressants (along with many other things) my whole life so I'm just not too jazzed about the whole thing. The process has been a nightmare with insurance and getting the run around. I think we finally have it straightened out but I think I'm chickening out. IDK. I just read a post on this thread about how meds legit made this dude wholfully apathetic and without a sex drive essentially permanently and now I'm freaking out. 

​

If you have any advice or personal stories either that meds helped or hurt it would be greatly appreciated!",5.335689257722457,7.045818145228218,5.691417704011066,78.10502881512221,68.79253112033193,9.172982941447671,30.816274781005074,9.586721724236666,2.960468695251268,1027,42,185,23,18,328,142,241,0.10400000000000001,0.818,0.078,-0.8545,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,1,2,0,1,12,7,1,0,11,0,23,10,2,3,0,43,39,18,0,3,16,1,1,1,0,2,7,0,0,1,12,15,0,1,5,2,0,4,7,4,0,0,7,2,24,3,28,28,5,21,0,2,1,1,11,10,1,7,7,130,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414089715105076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24048412500797486,0.10438275768742383,0.11706185949268627,0.06551350441715012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576171721498442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854053375444384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701038956245826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982235526034306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297623526509451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06363069089056887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04871165573531956,0.0,0.0,0.10553415131461774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050332906027780414,0.0,0.054751407079145456,0.0,0.0,0.10621357012409037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240335306653872,0.0,0.0,0.19372105905597325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031323895599346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609350650511826,0.047066139818506124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18231569410001056,0.0,0.09767214912818203,0.0,0.0,0.5350519478122913,0.1941018685638401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411908899546644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226568191367554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968468321635153,0.10792120241371424,0.0,0.09636460120424097,0.0,0.061716929610422924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889011726946108,0.07969222807176107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416610755347335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173037566663089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22034301152242708,0.0,0.12800607798730562,0.1234596808962275,0.0,0.0,0.05617577194409574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32267558700223103,0.0,0.18573381135701966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687225614366672,0.0,0.11706185949268627,0.06203885514270309
mentalhealth,Raspberrysmile,2020/02/17,"Im screwed up.. I am so hopeless that things will never get better. Everyday i find out that i have probably more diagnosis than have already been made with me. I now have the diagnosis: chronic depression, bulimia, personality order NOS. But i think i may also have borderline (i know its a personality disorder) and probably also dissociative disorder. Like how fucked up can i be even more. Am i that weird? I also thought that i was kind of normal but hearing and getting all these labels makes me so insecure of who i am as a person. Like there is a big huge flaw in me and who i am, so imperfect. I forget things so easily and when i am in a bad state i want to discuss the state with my psychiatrist. But as soon as i have the appointment i think ‘i was over exaggerating, i feel fine now’, and cant really come to terms with how i actually felt because i forget the intensity of the feeling i had at that time. I cant really place myself back in that ‘insane state/depression’. I feel so lonely, even though i have friends, i dont know what to do anymore & feel so so so lost.",3.7893055555555533,5.064183578703705,6.00925925925926,76.0241666666667,72.00925925925927,9.844444444444443,28.777777777777786,10.125756701596842,2.955255555555555,847,33,169,24,16,299,115,216,0.201,0.706,0.09300000000000001,-0.9755,0,2,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,2,22,15,2,1,9,0,24,3,0,4,2,35,43,26,0,2,3,0,5,2,1,2,1,1,0,3,13,10,0,0,11,0,0,1,4,9,0,0,8,6,31,6,21,32,4,24,0,4,0,2,8,11,2,1,11,132,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.12323384405725622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935626404057586,0.30296504604669994,0.0,0.1368274140791503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125238652946687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710371586907468,0.1054409040368534,0.07698085260615445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116869176312375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10878149252458616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21753446551669245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28946217106404315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14800255846624258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668172614618563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554096112209001,0.0,0.1212513387892309,0.0,0.11542023613548592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756581584221778,0.11674645896147025,0.13195515289015622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232994872688612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640714711391486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150415425521694,0.13880350240448933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339084240978647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378526472345322,0.0,0.0,0.11949188506999632,0.08429478227789917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739711820252964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373037958543065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307959382451809,0.13193869922062404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723085398824631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618000533917015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677934270510969,0.161833901061067,0.12407225792236327,0.10025447613683232,0.07363654476372172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448489618772643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,glitter_bat_,2020/02/17,"it’s getting heavy again some background: 
i’m a 25 y/o female. recently moved into my first apartment by myself which i always wanted. i have a small, but good, group of friends. and i’m currently dating someone who makes me happy. 

i have struggled with depression and anxiety for the last 10 years. i’m currently on effexor xr and have been for last 1-2 years. 

— 
i was feeling on top of the world... i got everything i wanted (on paper). i have my own home, a car, a cute puppy, a solid best friend, and a boyfriend who cares about my feelings. but recently, the last 3 or so months, i have been so depressed. i forgot how horrible this feels since my SNRI has significantly improved my quality of life. i don’t know what to do. i can’t pretend to act like i’m fine, but i don’t want to constantly drag my friends down by talking about the same thing again and again. this leads me to isolating myself which i know makes things worse. i’m feeling overwhelmed by the thought of having chronic depression and always feeling like this. i’m dissociating a lot lately too and it’s all getting too much to handle. i’m not sure what to do.. i have already made an appointment to talk to my doctor about my dosage, and have tried therapy since i realized this mood wasn’t just a bad few days. 

for the time being, i am not feeling motivated at all to do anything. i feel so weighted down and i can’t shake it. i’m so overwhelmed and exhausted of this. 

any advice?:(",1.918505747126435,4.252339931034484,3.4793103448275886,87.33505747126438,80.72413793103449,6.625287356321839,25.18390804597701,7.793537801064563,1.506163218390804,1140,45,229,20,30,376,152,290,0.154,0.65,0.195,0.8493,2,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,0,5,14,22,0,4,15,0,22,5,0,6,3,46,51,19,0,3,7,0,8,2,3,0,4,0,1,0,16,12,1,1,12,1,0,5,7,9,0,1,8,8,30,12,31,42,9,35,0,5,0,0,8,11,0,3,21,151,46,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746391776115156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135746013865227,0.0,0.18301196762729915,0.0,0.0,0.07478511533232059,0.0,0.08412871123077875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049805074017203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182249823309073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540942221851708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212435932331026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884127431520633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092320663343063,0.0,0.28415762731740296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256158023271018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09883625036643433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3892380322534494,0.07856442242256237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935426076249734,0.0,0.0,0.25489359280296564,0.0,0.11491225254355443,0.0,0.0,0.09223976992426228,0.08795510643006174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706784039341528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031144932813228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087609140593415,0.2689269549976933,0.12405384340830244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776768749474868,0.10745408067814123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349474212233627,0.0,0.10405870004560563,0.14681508220122708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777905219806023,0.116883432642796,0.08084248889388777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21716928153275628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18194088441637668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317939746546193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496720256082013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364784105780953,0.0,0.0,0.17678356414981464,0.0,0.0,0.12576321230239246,0.0,0.1461217712391625,0.0,0.0,0.08730593256973784,0.0641258870380558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466415285860267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194594004415942,0.0,0.0,0.1339169574106628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207143897262307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141637452559098
mentalhealth,lyftwynn,2020/02/17,"""Depression taught me how to live again."" Not sure if this is a good place to put this... apologies if it's not.

I have a friend who's done something brave. She's talking about the mental health issues that have plagued her whole life in a way she never has before. I am endlessly proud of her, and what she's doing, and how she's doing it, because I have witnessed a small part of the struggle, and the small part I've seen has been monumental. Now all she wants to do is be strong in herself (amazing) and help others on her journey wherever she can. Gets me a bit choked up if I'm honest. 

She posts occasionally on her YouTube channel, and this one's really something special. It's [here](https://youtu.be/3heiZ50wfYk) if anyone wants to take a look.",5.952796934865901,6.4904085862069,5.667126436781611,83.12773946360153,66.58620689655173,8.375478927203066,29.90421455938697,8.167268648758528,1.9033295019157088,595,20,117,7,9,184,90,145,0.091,0.765,0.14400000000000002,0.8397,0,0,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,2,5,11,0,1,9,0,15,2,0,2,3,18,23,11,0,6,6,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,10,5,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,2,0,1,4,2,17,9,12,18,5,15,0,1,2,0,17,8,0,4,3,84,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806048196342354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164457283304784,0.0,0.1558444143128989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19994884137284594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774404710305098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18742273584466773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414987424020992,0.0,0.0956866297189024,0.0,0.0,0.15361482374134708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19467645522878668,0.0,0.0,0.12275942128470005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911576478480855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12936198196975582,0.0,0.0,0.1617219558462925,0.0,0.15379716251514775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18456887046958384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125408187570462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410499317065117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39666021498522014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913493968428313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754039819628755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184113092209781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732851243996655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28199066699008346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191464772428609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17261366597444822,0.0,0.13770358029913332,0.1472064385543191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160494236128478,0.14537338352152693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044768313580689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,triedddd3345,2020/02/17,"Worried about mental health from my past 
Hello! i’m a (20M) last year when I was 19 I was in a such a dark place... I was and still am a virgin... therefore i thought why can’t i get a girlfriend like my mates so i questioned me sexuality by this point, i was so scared of myself i didn’t know what to think... Therefore i spoke to a few lads over snapchat and they asked me to send stuff so i did (wasn’t forced or anything) i wanted to see what my feelings were... After i sent stuff i was so ashamed of myself i could not cope with myself and I shut myself down and hated myself for it , i knew after that day i was 100% straight as i didn’t like it, ive only ever done physical things with women and only ever kissed women , however this really scared me and i can’t seem to get over it as i was petrified that the guys would say anything to my potential girlfriend in the future or any of my mates , they don’t know any of my mates however. I’m also so ashamed in myself as i feel i’m not normal for finding myself out... I finally had the courage to speak to my mum and my mate and they said it’s totally normal to find yourself out they know people who have been through it , i suspect i’ve gone through a “phase” it only lasted a day which is why i thought that... I even went to messaging the lads and telling them i’m sorry and they said “ur defo gay” this really knocked me mentally to me even thinking of taking my own life... however im not as bad now... However i explained to them that I was feeling low and they said it’s just a phase it’s normal because they finally understood what it was doing to me... 6/7 months on and I’m still scared of myself I do have times where I don’t want to be here as when I look at my mates i think am i normal? is it natural? i literally do not feel normal at all !! As well as this i feel as though i won’t be able to go back to my old life before this as i don’t feel it’s worth living almost... I’ve found a girl i really like and i’ve told her and she said it’s in the past now forget it and she said it’s normal but i seriously can’t get over it !!! I’m hoping someone can relate or give any advice of how i’m overreacting!! Thanks",0.20612244897959187,2.1312820148619984,2.639454915724251,93.25946314831668,84.47770700636944,5.628337449629536,19.3786992504008,6.868970318607317,0.15397201785172632,1683,46,390,21,49,578,197,471,0.07400000000000001,0.862,0.064,-0.6394,4,0,0,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,9,0,25,17,1,5,15,0,39,6,0,3,4,71,89,38,0,11,9,1,6,3,7,2,3,8,0,4,32,19,0,0,23,0,1,5,14,9,1,0,32,16,76,8,56,52,4,48,0,1,2,3,44,19,0,7,27,268,108,0,0.07452939902501475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282926615639505,0.0,0.0,0.07463042737416818,0.0,0.0,0.059601133473574076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15204764117700575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266269016247534,0.0,0.06967492735905786,0.0,0.0,0.05730850742498491,0.06222893509081031,0.04543242988877714,0.0,0.0634190292206703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05950566060908068,0.0,0.0,0.0961305934155768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626945125724127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984519303050389,0.13483221661349076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261058210295595,0.0,0.0,0.16328662732731938,0.13623704098991324,0.0,0.0,0.08171763917414279,0.0,0.0,0.11681560470919493,0.07149539073721801,0.042356774996590414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07379582253018742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358235166806347,0.0,0.07922126601177179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402450977645947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050454025609978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228782257759348,0.12150281502353201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528463725510301,0.10923389921479497,0.0,0.06581082478097575,0.0,0.06258592447221926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15021620943097014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948865524982435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4381379217286646,0.0,0.0,0.07820606708239103,0.0,0.0,0.17004889914560278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229348909331516,0.05166930115745249,0.0,0.07786735920716767,0.0,0.07045437210932147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348998376226809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323632434926778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35447262766717685,0.05926876949572964,0.22385079054846604,0.0,0.05939028166911635,0.06784876574390546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314851793685368,0.0,0.0,0.08342956039673435,0.0,0.0,0.11903854866985247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063666176229927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603683276865987,0.0,0.06514197976409884,0.06861665728168173,0.0,0.0,0.04951402103389498,0.1432662885899839,0.07322475613564958,0.1183360356224106,0.043458691921036505,0.0,0.0,0.07121603465563009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791874107019643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701088034448632,0.0690894995742859,0.13450238062723707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07568822245302301,0.0,0.05294354671444789,0.0,0.0,0.0479944894297784
mentalhealth,J-Snow-The-Crow,2020/02/17,"Worried about being a high functioning psychopath For as long as I can remember I've always had more violent thoughts and as I think back going through my childhood I definitely had some psychopath signs. I'm not proud of any of these so don't get mad at me saying it's f*cked up. I know, as a kid I didn't feel anything but as an adult... Well I still don't feel anything towards it but I know it's wrong. 

When I was a kid I would get a rush from hurting animals, I threw my cat down the stairs because I wanted to see what it would look like when I did. I would choke a cat or a dog just to see the look it made when I did it. One time, I went into a garden with a bunch of lady bugs on the flowers and used the thorns to disembowel them. I would impale them on the thorns still on the flowers and watch them squirm til they stopped moving the whole time I would get this high feeling. I must've done it to 100 maybe 200 lady bugs in that garden and the rush it gave me, killing ladybugs, throwing an animal down the stairs, choking an animal and seeing the look it its eyes, it all gave me a rush I to this day can't get close to. 

In my teenage years, I would lie all the time to make myself seem more interesting which I think was very common but I lied. Alot. I was in a horrible toxic relationship where I would scream at her and call her fat and hurt her self esteem as much as I could because.... I dont know... I could? She allowed it? She did alot of toxic things to me, cheating, saying hurtful things, starting arguments with me, getting me upset and riled up then pretending she didn't know who I was to make it seem like a stranger came up to her and is now harassing her.  I deserved stuff like that but it wasn't good for my mental health and trying to snap out of my mentality. But did the same things to her in my own way so its not like I didn't deserve what I got. 

I would go on the BestGore site because it would give me that rush again and more and more id visit that page to find more and more messed up videos. Until 2 years ago I banished myself from going on those sites because it was making me worse. 

I don't have a healthy sex life for someone like me. It's all rough violent sex. Telling her she's a hole for my use and that's all her meaning in life is and will be, Hitting her, choking her, sex until she bleeds and can't walk. I don't feel love for her, I don't feel hate either. It's just what she likes and what I feel most natural doing. I met a nice girl who is really into religion and is super sweet and nice but I couldn't fathom that this type of sex would be okay with her but it's the only kind I like. I can't finish unless it turns aggressive. Which I've become worried about.

The reason why I made this post, I've always had an idea I was a psychopath because I got really into mental health and fixing my problems to be a better person. I'm sweet to women and respectful to them. I want them to feel like they can trust me because I don't want to have thoughts and feelings like that that I do now. I don't want to hurt anyone but I do get that feeling of a rush everytime I think of it. That heart racing blood in the water feeling.

The reason I made this post is because I had a really messed up thought that made me go ""Dude, come on, that's really not okay.""

I saw Birds of Prey, the scene where Harley is tied to the chair, I was bored and she's hot, so I had a sexual thought about her. The thought was she'd have to suck dick to get out of the chair. But where it turns messed up is this. She says nothing is going in my mouth, anything that does, is getting bit off. To which the guy says. Okay. And proceeds to break her jaw so she cant close her mouth then use it anyway. It got me hard. I felt bad. I know that's really messed up. I don't like knowing that thought did something to me.

I'm pretty sure im high functioning psychopathic. I have control of myself and I won't ever hurt anyone or take advantage of anybody sexually. I'm just upset that I have these thoughts in general and when I look back at myself I think. Damn. That's something a serial killer would've done as a kid. I'm not going to be a serial killer, if I could I'd go back in time and throw my stupid self down the stairs instead. Is their anybody out there that knows how I feel and have some links to help me? I know I need therapy and I intend on getting it. I didnt do it yet because aside from the really rough sex I thought I was acting pretty normal but that one thought made me go. Most people aren't like this. You need help to get this fixed because it's not okay. Any help would be appreciated and please don't hate me for what I did as a kid. I love animals now and I really feel sick knowing what I did to them. Never killed one or permanently injure one but it's not normal... Thanks.

These are all examples",2.1251981362951824,3.5059269960937516,3.4875818900602447,92.03251223644578,76.40234375,6.575564759036144,22.102974397590362,7.1928832394048134,0.4953829442771083,3780,100,862,42,83,1238,340,1024,0.162,0.703,0.136,-0.9918,4,0,2,0,0,0,97.0,0,1,9,5,33,62,13,2,53,4,90,23,8,17,8,171,198,70,2,25,26,0,17,11,0,13,8,5,2,11,75,44,2,2,44,4,0,23,29,29,1,4,53,34,140,33,107,120,25,113,0,5,10,8,65,50,3,12,47,574,215,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036222151822522086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800176764435265,0.0,0.0,0.05557581946161201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571440376723184,0.0,0.10087909821120424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426224944528667,0.0341184911037436,0.2241846750949056,0.045129434644456304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036139571643600994,0.04461128034489895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041725193958597764,0.046735828394968905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035199436298979606,0.0,0.0,0.04583078237136677,0.09787617363934878,0.0,0.0,0.02635294008696045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035759060050630426,0.08363307488422289,0.0478905603142103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03696248197331567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479357691737487,0.0583843741800734,0.03923442009138553,0.0,0.03734759613218202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21348976239820344,0.03919904541620016,0.1857848602159804,0.03427353677073189,0.09804445230770564,0.0,0.0,0.04046031176357795,0.0,0.0,0.03660478497871316,0.08068654259038087,0.0,0.08686987992661614,0.0,0.04842227405006499,0.08216784233869093,0.12952046387083502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187208238141176,0.04612880280298965,0.04413852553527512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041663157818892,0.04255201866909032,0.2021127139743942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05772480204437205,0.2195969551497454,0.0,0.0,0.036162037688424416,0.13725687603099085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376002580868428,0.1933254866776029,0.08182813317596246,0.0,0.04105188609464803,0.04451125536138939,0.0,0.0,0.12353940488366558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04343038398579648,0.030038648383633283,0.06059807049375476,0.03151568872893778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007317262137377,0.03920868280552155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075798398278837,0.0310777820866027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028328921092810495,0.03567956976869869,0.0,0.04485476793560625,0.0,0.0,0.07826998305397645,0.08314373108851113,0.0,0.03909990585337697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832430029341544,0.08402693697022386,0.0,0.04387104604956483,0.046289260984330484,0.0,0.0,0.1299820401437983,0.0,0.0,0.09768639590985746,0.07439939337079465,0.08525702462700542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034622674231835064,0.06291591695838693,0.0,0.0,0.02892269666106145,0.0,0.0652657105230567,0.03416289014671346,0.0,0.0,0.04677780053453992,0.0,0.0,0.038512434437105086,0.0,0.0307235239926487,0.0,0.03571563700741952,0.037620711452274296,0.04672984423953594,0.0,0.08144171278314195,0.10473219219945737,0.0,0.29196243479575146,0.09530903857020576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027742963697286474,0.08889335925405392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058762728370728,0.0,0.0337158522756,0.09640707431931643,0.032434760423903544,0.0,0.0,0.03674030612207945,0.03787995846542255,0.036872061768098686,0.045621535914487414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299572990131353,0.041642391212932686,0.3483306776710588,0.04467674270691023,0.0,0.05262823663136825
mentalhealth,emmashawn,2020/02/17,"I’m crying in my college bathroom and I feel helpless I can’t even make a sound. People keep coming in. I just want to go home, but I have a class in 30 minutes. I don’t know why I always get this way. I’ve had depression for years, I should be used to it. But every time life seems to be going well, a wave of sadness hits me. I take my medication, I have friends, I have a busy schedule, why am I feeling this way? Gosh I hate myself. Please someone, just say anything. I feel so alone.",0.6173076923076906,2.3860399615384646,2.648692307692308,94.59630769230768,82.07692307692308,4.929230769230768,21.93846153846154,5.6839178017228535,0.02849538461538525,372,12,86,2,10,125,72,104,0.20199999999999999,0.679,0.11900000000000001,-0.8951,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,4,0,10,2,0,2,0,16,27,4,0,2,4,0,3,0,1,1,2,2,1,0,3,2,0,1,5,0,0,3,2,4,1,0,1,5,17,2,8,22,0,11,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,1,3,50,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935363645513128,0.0,0.0,0.1554871154846806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537744339783456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16096813381202224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20526304323064687,0.0,0.0,0.1609470330906866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12342294006987538,0.0,0.15744229382326005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.283454525593522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14437186818722572,0.0,0.09762954255664333,0.0,0.21240000823792107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844910536947202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18744139285902425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16609469576386385,0.0,0.0,0.1026964248701284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198867136432435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473421239644625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882473925389708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295490507997121,0.0,0.0,0.20512227030678834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486029936197665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701153877283899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15833058266451958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14049964548349647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896281082283137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613918464375158,0.0,0.0,0.11021814886213932,0.2966503674507503,0.0,0.0,0.16801458017454066,0.0,0.33723420580939895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033529407137745
mentalhealth,girl_aboutlondontown,2020/02/17,"Research Help I suffer from anxiety and I’m a filmmaker. As part of my research I would like to ask the community the following question (ideally answered in a sentence). Answers are greatly appreciated, anonymous and will not be used for anything but my own personal research. 

Question: What do you think is the cause or root of your anxiety/mental health issue?",5.466302083333333,8.344081359375004,6.454375000000002,67.78645833333337,71.34375,9.266666666666666,40.35416666666666,9.725611199111238,5.031747916666665,293,19,42,8,6,97,52,64,0.057999999999999996,0.848,0.094,0.3174,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,1,0,4,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,3,0,15,11,5,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,7,8,2,2,0,1,0,0,7,1,0,3,1,32,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19166730752845632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20617833636320448,0.0,0.2342270594275995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25738016536204705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762282866212131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26631910337624,0.0,0.0,0.16793596826645474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615053439235074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240431373082745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27131733181535184,0.0,0.0,0.21876744937777814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5613386085791683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16054001424170042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21639164287711574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798097152921896,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Space_Pixie_,2020/02/17,"Explaining mental health to others Anyone know how to explain depression and anxiety to older adults? I am 21, working with 2 older ladies (50+ yrs) in an office and I don't think they understand how greatly it effects me and others with the same issues. They call my generation lazy and sensitive... Which isn't the best thing you want to hear when your having an depressive episode. They just say ""go for a run! You'll feel good as new"" and I internally cringe every time because its far more complicated than just going for a run..",5.556958981612446,6.8323233663366345,6.159915134370582,76.59792079207921,67.8118811881188,9.335785007072136,29.28005657708628,9.606745405546679,2.7273581329561534,424,15,76,9,7,138,78,101,0.138,0.821,0.040999999999999995,-0.8738,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,3,3,5,5,0,0,6,0,5,1,0,3,0,20,15,9,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,6,7,0,0,7,0,0,4,2,2,0,0,0,3,11,3,11,14,3,11,0,2,0,0,12,2,0,0,5,51,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699592657192011,0.0,0.0,0.15534626868243334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354326295071402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23315346652024124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22686017493856225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3827089941973521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871876130803635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233571101769477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525284000558189,0.18634546205552932,0.0,0.2449429554283493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361560760699976,0.2504014772649783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23188751805410426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12209869518863803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22389487297549365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21457294800890148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17667831811131193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759972298441246,0.14235741760507864,0.0,0.0,0.12954897935715726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23128656550103502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104148639247032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16174223837469026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Earthbound-123,2020/02/17,"sociology and psychology Stigma of mental health. 

Mental health is a serious issue in this modern day of age with about 1 percent of the human population suffering with a serious mental health issue, Schizophrenia. If stigma still remains in modern day pop culture on mental illness, misinterpretation of Psychopathy and ASPD for serial criminals and killers in slasher films or paranoid schizophrenics, the crazy people balding and in padded cells and strapped to tables while screaming like wild animals. If this stigma of mental health continues to increase for the next few years, It might as well belittle the men and woman effected with mental health issues, the most common include but in no particular order;

   Major depressive disorder (Clinical depression) 

   Generalized anxiety disorder 

   Obsessive-Compulsive disorder

   Post-traumatic stress disorder 

   Panic disorder

   Bipolar disorder 

   Borderline personality disorder 

   Specific phobias  

   These stigmas are deeply harmful for the population of people suffering with these mental disorders as I have depression, I face stigma and harassment all the time. I remember wearing a trench coat and walking down the street one weekend and I was harassed by kids as they spotted my cutting scars. They called me a clown and said I was a crazy person and belonged in an asylum which made my mental health worsen. They had no idea that their bullying was bad. 

   Sociology 

   Sociology or as know as social science is a study of the growth of society and what keeps it moving. It specifies with people indefinitely, social class, religion, psychology of community and sexuality. 

   What I have observed in recent times on the TV and in real life, sociologically, the relationship of community to community differs positively or negative to neutral I suppose; like how religious people's relationship to the gay community differs, neutral, positively or negatively based on different subjective opinions. 

   People and mental health. 

   If the stigma continues among the general population and education of mental health is lacking, there will be an increase number of mental disorders. the stigma continues which is obviously a bad thing, this will discourage someone from getting help and leave themselves in the dark of no help. Mental illnesses like depression and anxiety are increasing widely across the globe for many reasons either that someones depression is hereditary or they have not gotten up on their feat from tragedy, other times there is a socioeconomic involvement in depression, that poor people have a higher risk of gaining mental illness than middle-class or rich classes so depression can also cause someone a great deal of problems of getting employed at a job for reasons. The stigma continues and treatment is lacking, there will be a higher risk of mental illness either hereditary, past tragedies or socioeconomic reasons, then indeed the unemployment hypothetically may lead to an economic and socioeconomic collapse in society. Perhaps, though this may be unlikely.",11.866755801444596,12.96577656846473,11.397948363301065,45.14109651144922,54.0622406639004,14.526632856923316,47.727370524051025,13.500993698302588,7.644456185646227,2494,144,282,89,27,818,248,482,0.298,0.622,0.08,-0.9992,5,1,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,6,3,10,30,3,4,34,0,27,20,3,8,2,66,34,42,0,6,14,0,0,3,0,6,16,2,0,6,18,25,0,2,7,3,2,7,6,24,1,1,7,2,16,6,63,18,12,51,0,10,0,1,24,22,0,16,24,214,34,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03498045148545165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692500120128267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304546467729701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04466545973836605,0.0,0.0,0.04493507030009265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056419926321237025,0.045096068260336415,0.2637243673007658,0.0,0.0,0.1371032003403555,0.4511889642475444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045706766019647994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048225695483326704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719654967393578,0.0,0.0,0.05863866416708759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04937937943249295,0.0,0.13696581082528278,0.04340717295195687,0.038879888185376736,0.0,0.0,0.024039452299338442,0.0,0.0,0.046316448766160236,0.0,0.0,0.030896259274149795,0.06411037658778798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041389726073732015,0.0,0.04434750960310139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6171428904218415,0.04640333609630788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046490810067035135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04652009979566933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02964070268429783,0.0,0.0,0.05132179742518175,0.0,0.0,0.04175667644082031,0.1819511184189303,0.0763876323051892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041892732485424564,0.0,0.0,0.04185517441574532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04978795795144952,0.0,0.13492214466057875,0.04318993544187349,0.09392504887820027,0.04955114468409325,0.0,0.04160864679034999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917889510319288,0.11118733181715544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03493240760673279,0.0,0.05010629872812716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02906023274530072,0.0,0.042976280487564994,0.0,0.07651891377396547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03932929983499429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028168405720199286
mentalhealth,TAMentalHealthp,2020/02/17,"I HATE my body I (22F) hate my body.  For over six years, I bounced in the same 10lb bubble (135-145lbs).  I was comfortable there.  I gained weight in the winter, lost it in the summer, I was fine.  Within 6 months of graduating college, I have gained 20lbs (165) almost uncontrollably.  I'm in shock.  None of my clothes fit.  I'm disgusted by my reflection.  I'm tired all the time.  I think about self harm as a result of this weight gain regularly.  I even told a close friend that suicide sounded a lot fucking easier than losing the weight.  I dont know what to do.  I'm trying to eat well and excercise, but I am so overwhelmed.  I fucking hate this ugly, terrible body.",1.310454545454547,3.732788530303029,2.860181818181818,90.23027272727276,84.15151515151516,6.247272727272727,20.921212121212122,7.554174236665415,0.8123448484848486,514,16,108,9,15,168,88,132,0.257,0.61,0.133,-0.9661,0,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,5,5,17,6,2,8,0,6,10,3,1,1,11,19,4,1,0,1,0,3,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,5,2,4,0,3,0,0,0,2,13,1,1,4,4,16,4,16,15,4,13,0,3,0,2,3,8,2,2,5,62,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386542445961688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4614153534327434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16228176093417815,0.0,0.0,0.14168584500239498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914558478744875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069789101346256,0.2560201815351516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4101211427475908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609759259387963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549086468582945,0.15115259205306555,0.11771930599248512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052267615127323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14445080614742412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15145992754355647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872377178880893,0.0,0.0,0.08074095662400864,0.1591469256372613,0.0,0.13231071877432118,0.0,0.09400969570599743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5058448506028507,0.12449805422265366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916791596678034
mentalhealth,Chapstick9,2020/02/17,I can't do this anymore I have enough pills to kill me. I can't be here anymore. The pain is too much,-3.1225000000000023,-1.622501583333328,-0.4666666666666668,109.095,106.5,2.4000000000000004,14.333333333333336,3.1291,-1.7884666666666669,78,2,22,0,4,26,19,24,0.32,0.68,0.0,-0.8402,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,6,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7057549084608037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3676567869305759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.393661693562492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615683638867572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3786171658053598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ErSigna,2020/02/17,"I need help. Idk what is this pain. (17 yrs old) Recently, from the last 2/3 months, i have a continous low mood and sadness, and idk why. My life is good, i have a  lovely family, i didn't have any kind of traumatic childhood experience, my marks at school are actually pretty good; the only thing that i can complain about is the fact that i am single, and i'm not so popular, but i dont care about those at all.

​

 I even have an active social life, but i feel more and more lonely as the time passes. When i hang out with my friends, i am often bored. I think that nobody cant understand my pain because it's really hard to explain ( it's a mix between sadness, emptiness and nostalgia, and i'm pretty sure it's not depression or something like that).

​

 After that i feel like my life is ""empty"", like if i don't have any rule in this world. I already have a hobby, and it's music, and it's the main thing that can make my mood happier. I use it to hide my demons, and this happiness cant last so much. And now music is my drug; i usually listen to it around 2 and half hours a day.

​

In the end i randomly think about past years, and i cant stop doing this.

​

Probably all these things come from my ""mental behaviour"": i am a really reflective boy. This thing is becoming worse day per day, i cant stand it, and the loneliness is slowly strangling me. I'd greatful if you write your thoughts down there. Thanks.",4.432874909877434,4.967804756849315,5.436560922855083,83.45797043979816,69.92465753424658,9.024080749819754,27.69718817591925,9.134995656068208,2.0535726027397256,1127,36,235,21,19,372,158,292,0.156,0.67,0.174,0.8727,0,3,2,0,0,0,63.0,0,2,0,0,11,25,0,0,14,0,27,7,0,2,4,43,44,22,0,3,7,0,3,3,1,0,6,1,0,1,26,17,0,1,8,0,0,3,9,9,0,1,2,4,33,14,20,42,7,32,1,5,0,1,11,9,0,5,22,155,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.08146333817743855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212101230411464,0.0,0.0,0.3617972965249855,0.4057438721581535,0.11353699264671915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431389561156422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05088794622140538,0.09219585674157163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851122747049306,0.0,0.0,0.07190965745464849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16151090135194598,0.0,0.07190023108181706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783661755986356,0.0,0.09680899001266853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739375037280223,0.0,0.0,0.05513700837729087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165835623572736,0.0786964521331489,0.0,0.08441885300189647,0.059637323625475365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06449557028197145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003623626291287,0.0,0.092035752303641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888648127027101,0.07478067337960842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055954128982591264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220987446914385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693040026288135,0.0,0.13609284671331684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689079051111906,0.12235068215380718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753429422093086,0.0,0.0557227960210961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08412706964848989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663204007683042,0.0,0.06136657693379932,0.06189852664977007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759703466486668,0.0,0.0,0.06348944469780034,0.17765481336199151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796900302092961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16985605028707704,0.09000434435341881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069574074184671,0.0,0.08242531622406182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448507630573668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509619838730485,0.0,0.06426611492431583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979207585157171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867784996878252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685613061399052,0.0,0.0,0.2218386157858397,0.10697978231196437,0.0,0.06627290056408676,0.04867720222634686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869044509420066,0.0,0.07209894355144847,0.09194018491786776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07532669866839545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507210349278409,0.0,0.0,0.4057438721581535,0.053757657316710825
mentalhealth,idkineedanswersig,2020/02/17,"Please help me. Is this normal? Throwaway account for obvious reasons.

So I have diagnosed myself with OCD.

To start off, I have been creating numerous accounts for years. I've always tried to ""change"" my life and ""renew"" myself. And if I make one wrong move, I have to leave those accounts and create another one. I always end up ""messing up"" where I have to start over again. I've probably created more than 1,000 accounts. If I don't ""renew"" myself, I go into a state of distress. I get to the point where I'm so stressed, I stay awake all night and half the day thinking about it. And when I do finally sleep, I'm literally thinking about it as I am sleeping. I'll wake up every 10-15 minutes thinking about it and it pisses me off so much, so I wake up in a bad mood.  It has gotten worse over the years, and it is affecting my life. I've tried so hard to keep one account. I keep telling myself that I'm okay, I can do this, but I always end up giving in, and creating more accounts. I have to ""change"" on a certain day as well. And I have to restart all of my devices and clean them off when I do. And when I ""change"", I basically try to be perfect and do everything perfectly. If I don't word something correctly, I have to do it over again. If I make a typo, I have to do it over again. If I don't do my usual routine that I made up for myself, I have to do it over again. 

It's annoying and it's exhausting. This is also giving me suicidal thoughts. I've been trying my absolute hardest to overcome this, but I just can't. I always go right back to where I started. I'm losing hope.


(I'm sorry if this is hard to understand. I have been trying to find a way to explain it for so long because my friends, as well as my siblings, ask me why I do it. They also make fun of me for it, as if I can help it.)",1.4942862838915474,3.0602838815789504,3.6509090909090918,89.39712121212122,78.60526315789474,6.711323763955344,24.93620414673046,7.5764669431780325,1.1676491228070187,1385,51,307,20,33,475,156,380,0.091,0.76,0.149,0.9748,0,0,1,0,0,0,64.0,0,0,2,3,25,19,2,2,8,1,35,9,5,6,7,50,63,38,1,9,10,0,2,0,1,0,4,0,1,0,23,15,0,2,8,0,6,3,4,9,2,4,6,2,53,9,53,56,5,50,0,1,0,0,10,23,1,8,21,225,76,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485289040463671,0.30908591322704804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737750201911606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681664254539323,0.0,0.0,0.07140778458634628,0.0775387563150006,0.0566099050996691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947179390464682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978104151050405,0.0,0.0,0.09425645817558777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450241678604646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824313129617176,0.0,0.08346146183909359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017295409872847,0.0848773219964166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174760201809162,0.0,0.048518355082019855,0.17816996777878533,0.10555512961798838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663783719975827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449148243702325,0.0,0.0,0.0922363273052682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16508612486093935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833108325400833,0.0,0.0,0.13118720125812072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218298457720917,0.0,0.10389266379666236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787151668221793,0.18596518992442168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870125704861783,0.06826677738966494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714791659057668,0.09098840567683296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18878405929211484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193835682678416,0.08778784953236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012464189921996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548113030290513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930657109716358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18586499561801048,0.0,0.0,0.07149234616703054,0.0,0.10395524756497602,0.19719189118495245,0.09898219384548697,0.0,0.0,0.10637703802942372,0.0,0.0,0.1015797093970097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116848034494283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785132562998622,0.0,0.07372477944560182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31524766072432964,0.0,0.0,0.09667618927203732,0.0,0.0,0.1022781528734052,0.0,0.0,0.07371225699862599,0.0,0.0,0.1669943512259171,0.0,0.08379660763938512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946378084193537,0.0,0.10153377109103724,0.0,0.11960458635288533
mentalhealth,enk9898,2020/02/17,"Body dysmorphia is killing me I don’t understand how people heal from body dysmorphia like? My face still looks them same. I’ve been severely bdd for almost ten years I will probably kill myself soon bc of it I can’t get access to a gun tho. I’m just ugly and it physically hurts to be in this body I want to destroy it. I have sat in my room for 7 years alone only going to school or work and now I can’t even do that. I have nothing I want to get plastic surgery but there’s so many things I want to fix and I’ll never make enough to get it. And it’s so far away I don’t want to live like this any longer. I’m young I’m supposed to be beautiful and living my best life but it’s taken away my wild free years I hate my parents for making me I wish my Kim had an abortion. I truly fucking hate them. 
It’s not fair that their are beautiful girls with perfect hair and bodies walking around living better lives than me and I’m so nice and hardworking and no matter how hard I try I’m still ugly. Fucking bullshit.",0.003500352858150535,2.193929110091748,2.024036697247705,95.48516584333099,88.1743119266055,5.005222300635145,18.47635850388145,6.490185161304077,-0.08034001411432579,798,22,181,9,26,265,126,218,0.174,0.615,0.21100000000000002,0.9059999999999999,1,1,0,1,0,1,11.0,0,0,3,4,14,15,7,0,2,0,14,10,6,4,2,31,38,18,2,5,5,1,2,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,12,11,0,0,1,0,1,2,7,8,0,1,4,3,27,8,21,31,3,18,0,1,1,2,5,7,2,2,11,108,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715069868479568,0.11082557923041443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276750944048338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952577124761435,0.0,0.0,0.2010706558116908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229582495779353,0.09463779918053168,0.0,0.475436605139232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056543791616323,0.0,0.07067622074681512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978499930441922,0.16771810241849971,0.0,0.060813775220189575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585604179332828,0.21129184622175612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11455175841513328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367717887268281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558125311342084,0.10455510826478358,0.0,0.3779517874633001,0.0,0.08985779354324502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428542007672214,0.1084869310074141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252935176926661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267480439655766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813826165150189,0.0,0.0,0.1188171078930353,0.0,0.0,0.0741842424647895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153701859587026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829542767240632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088592333047045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17090969607409293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710897972200531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264981037818871,0.0,0.0,0.11139665243767097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524588124339195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12305121333022992,0.0,0.0,0.07790138555469048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20672438533565807
mentalhealth,CJE3m,2020/02/17,"Why do I talk less and remain silent all the time? And people ask why are you angry or sad and im not, Honestly i just want to be like the others full of joy in my class.
When someone sits beside me we never laugh and when we talk we talk a little bit.
But when they sit beside some other person they laugh and chat.
It Hurts.",0.5259999999999998,2.4079316000000013,2.3014285714285734,96.37357142857144,83.0,4.571428571428573,12.857142857142858,5.288315135182226,-1.2654285714285716,252,2,58,1,7,83,53,70,0.231,0.6920000000000001,0.077,-0.8945,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,3,1,2,0,4,7,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,2,16,5,10,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,10,5,3,4,5,10,0,2,0,0,12,3,0,2,6,39,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207377946750365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577789291926368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527684447477712,0.0,0.25504719346003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153549822026686,0.2366515569793795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18210821188060736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16369400044180535,0.20616851204273492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20006141541482264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5693464064145474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768189186155386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926809650213273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4261182609520001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hibibun,2020/02/17,"Feeling watched. Hi! 
This is something rather odd, but lately I've been feeling like this when I am in my room. First off I'm a college student and I'm living alone. My room is rather small so idk if this may be in fact some sort of claustrophobia I have. But it makes me nervous whenever I am in my room.

I'm a kinda shy, nervous gloomy person lol and this has been keeping me awake till late multiple days in a row. It's like I'm afraid to fall asleep,and when I wake up it makes me afraid to leave the security of the blanket ahah. Even things like the touch of my own hair or clothes on my body, when I'm in my room, make me flinch. When I feel this ""presence"" I'm always also scared of even mentioning it trough text message which is so weird lol

Has anyone ever felt like this? Do you think I might be having some sort of problem?",1.2920873949579852,3.265247102857142,2.449848739495799,95.83332773109244,80.82857142857142,5.260504201680673,21.15126050420168,6.2272716619740125,0.0230336134453788,653,19,149,5,17,208,101,175,0.146,0.716,0.138,0.4284,0,1,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,1,12,12,0,5,6,2,16,3,3,3,2,27,31,14,0,4,6,0,6,4,0,2,0,0,4,1,12,2,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,7,0,1,3,7,17,5,16,24,3,24,0,0,1,0,5,13,0,9,14,89,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818880891434699,0.0,0.14044227253568156,0.14612889100973225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279673223417635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19507287085286265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325958260066657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23198909184662955,0.15885723818170186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663943912494288,0.12546208939525855,0.16862156664365058,0.0,0.0,0.14938124202055622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15609803821309953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3962112597940543,0.1859549275173691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3431938544247388,0.0,0.15507459759613082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516806920942769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18630376961580705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533435421641514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804345177675434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17582503274301234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519991450917834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11667331191717938,0.11252942114068576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,powerfuljoehogan,2020/02/17,Cycling panic attacks and nothing but antipsychotics to hand HELP I've been getting panic attacks lasting 20 to 40 minutes or so one after the other and I don't have any benzodiazepines to hand and I'm feel like I'm gonna die if i can't get this shit under control all I have is a small amount of Lyrica that I need to save for work and seroquel will it stop this if I take a like twice my daily 100mg dose? I can't call 999,2.381566820276497,3.405201688172042,4.055944700460831,89.64677419354841,75.12903225806451,6.174500768049157,25.1136712749616,6.1826913282559595,0.6594897081413214,339,11,75,2,7,114,67,93,0.231,0.5589999999999999,0.21,-0.3347,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,2,1,8,3,2,3,0,8,4,3,1,1,14,16,9,1,3,4,0,3,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,1,3,7,3,8,13,2,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,3,5,43,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411009389566001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4721017456668355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21187142547744392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23271870710542555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21534281360576887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491364221061213,0.14823155280494152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21681088087466027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907678817086375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16913279107433318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20273916288060256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385188609828965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19909313124683609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406012154954036,0.0,0.0,0.4868917701611749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129864449228961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17347169772285828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600734727493376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510558590269918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TurboCasul,2020/02/17,"I accepted my life long envy I just accepted that i may have been envyous of my best friend (Since over 10 years) all along who over time gained many qualities i always lacked (Education, romantic relationships etc) and that i might indeed have an inferiority complex due to having a older sister (I am a man btw) who was always the vastly more successfull sibling since our childhood days.

All i ever had was physical fitness due to me working out on a regular basis most of my life and i used that as a means of compensation. I am capable of genuine admiration towards people who are more advanced in this particular area and use that to further motivate myself. Not so much in other areas.....

I pretended to simply not ""want"" the qualities the individuals i described above have when it actually was the other way around.

I even pretended to be ""proud"" of my sister and my friend and would compliment them on their achievements when in reality i felt empowered whenever they suffered a setback.

I dont even know why i even wrote that. I was in tears moments ago after realising all that.

What am i even doing here",7.502362459546922,7.878904883495146,8.518592233009711,64.56423139158579,63.271844660194176,11.915210355987055,36.58414239482201,11.538034831475384,4.622499676375403,890,40,147,26,12,304,130,206,0.044000000000000004,0.7859999999999999,0.171,0.9776,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,3,7,11,10,0,0,10,0,20,2,0,3,4,31,27,9,0,3,3,2,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,1,14,8,0,0,7,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,8,1,28,8,24,15,10,32,0,2,0,0,14,16,0,3,14,123,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.1573981074081209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297597324900246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26841638120346417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358442441810398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926641394164324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402024913834823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890334816085344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988365225360933,0.4261284136345303,0.14589820228591674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15486598987579078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24922820315755803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864208021432228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278511722146893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273869091219518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16352516915086798,0.0,0.17569469884095934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17110573856852287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856846630144526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181983566808304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17316766649098514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26684546601594444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405089056946217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786096792744948,0.0,0.0,0.09513443145530263,0.12802639283904754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554129591255674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742278200354993,0.0,0.0,0.1145774872250455,0.0,0.0,0.1038670119546856
mentalhealth,Libbers2015,2020/02/17,"I constantly feel like I'm messing up and my immediate reaction is to cry... I've had anxiety as long as I can remember. Been in and out of counseling since I was a child and have tried multiple medications with no luck. 

I have an intense fear of failure and making mistakes. My body's reaction to the slightest mishap is to cry. I've gotten pretty good at not crying at work or public, but at home with my husband it's like I cant control it sometimes. 

For example. I accidently overloaded the washer and now it wont stop flooding the floor. We cant afford a plumber or a new appliance and my poor husband is trying to fix it. He got rightfully upset and immediatly my eyes started watering up. He got mad that I started crying again. Now it's been a few hours and I'm still on mental repeat of ""Its all your fault. You did this. You've robbed your husband of a day off to fix your mess. You've cost yourself possibly thousands and fucked up your finances.... now he hates you you selfish bitch"". Didnt help that my husbands temper isnt good under pressure and he made me look stupid for not having infinite towels.

This happens for whatever reason at least once a day. I know the long term answer is that I need help for my issues again but were not in a good place financially to get help. What tips or tricks are there when this kinda thing happens?",3.1702796185550355,5.079541654275097,4.587661225149507,83.00257475351545,74.8364312267658,7.652238564732504,27.30903507354129,8.456263369488248,2.015754679165993,1071,42,208,20,23,356,154,269,0.209,0.6920000000000001,0.099,-0.988,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,7,0,2,8,21,7,3,12,0,20,5,2,4,1,36,38,18,0,2,8,4,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,14,14,1,2,5,0,3,0,9,15,0,2,11,3,25,6,31,26,4,36,0,0,2,1,21,16,2,5,22,134,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902306636944173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926132251832678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257551018673047,0.1305193411313142,0.0,0.0,0.5113098461951628,0.1500986105431174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309490953918265,0.05884038987382414,0.08313506399039944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758259454441703,0.06079875071891196,0.0,0.0,0.29281800611485337,0.1861441394430884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058119875905804,0.0,0.0,0.11489171504564664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340019543486536,0.0,0.11672903734266232,0.0,0.1146014401577784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146050303654295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395414924514095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370543558710552,0.0,0.0,0.20596835091375956,0.09772185907794892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011252193161676,0.07767817083862094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723097325608894,0.11727403064688165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628720507742374,0.0,0.1123912939424118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393071829825715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158233927809935,0.0,0.0,0.13119018359915718,0.0,0.1183905711333814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964819149026695,0.0,0.0,0.13182502092534293,0.099379718013049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962628286571703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509333853282548,0.0,0.16473518960920255,0.0,0.09293358192002432,0.09729089669383996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731134798535491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801577697098404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471906465729932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hider19,2020/02/17,"What the Hell do I do? Pretty long post inside. Based in the UK. One of my very good friends is currently undergoing an extremely traumatic period. She had some horrific experiences in her childhood which she was told she'd imagined only to have her memories confirmed a couple of years ago. She suffers from complex PTSD and experiences vivid flashbacks and mild hallucinations. 

She's sought treatment in the past for her issues through the NHS; has been in touch with Crisis who were shit, amongst other things. It's left her extremely reluctant to try again and has got herself caught in the trap that the people that abused her must be brought to justice for her mental health to improve. Unfortunately the family member that abused her died twenty years ago and so the police have no case to pursue. Since she found this out she's really gone off the deep end. She's determined to get some kind of closure for her trauma but seems to have zeroed in on that people must be punished. 

She has tried to take her own life on multiple occasions. Every single day I do what I can to get her out of the house because when she cocoons herself into her living room her mood takes a severe downturn - she knows this and knows how beneficial she finds getting out and about can be for her mood, but it's still an uphill struggle every time I try to get her out in the first place. Her coping mechanisms consist of alcohol and other slightly more questionable methods along those lines. They're working for her in that she's still here surviving but they're not working for her in that she is showing any signs of any improvement. I am by no means any kind of mental health expert and so I don't really know whether what I'm doing is actually helping her. 

As I write this I have not heard from her since Thursday. We called the police on Friday evening as she had sent some distressing messages on that Thursday and the Friday we didn't hear from her at all. They found her in her house, safe and sound but with a smashed phone. Since then I have knocked on her door every day but if she's even there she won't answer. She hasn't sought other methods of getting into contact with myself or her other friends. I'm going out of my mind with worry about her and I just don't know what to do. 

If anyone could give me any kind of pointers for me to try or for me to help her in any way I would be so appreciative.",6.602773415814103,6.687883498929335,6.442493457054487,79.6796875247839,65.18843683083512,9.31680545642002,31.214925846617497,8.94667605116694,2.412572432389563,1922,65,367,28,27,605,230,467,0.107,0.805,0.08800000000000001,-0.5085,1,0,3,0,2,0,28.0,2,0,1,4,15,16,3,2,18,0,38,5,1,1,3,64,65,29,1,6,13,0,1,0,2,4,4,3,2,0,24,25,1,1,13,1,0,5,9,7,0,3,15,5,66,7,70,40,7,57,1,1,1,0,65,29,2,9,21,264,90,2,0.0,0.199618635570213,0.0822050116067987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14934539854347928,0.09002576192574333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2864266922746068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058901795249292864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05135124957272296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601733204011608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725790446179672,0.09320873698828692,0.0,0.10865423896855347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742667520473284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461065907833274,0.0,0.0,0.11127799363553824,0.0,0.21292471108017447,0.0,0.0,0.16480361036835522,0.07941293477230785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699282549985821,0.07165356252966322,0.0,0.1847272045099975,0.13016552530828954,0.0,0.2200567335599858,0.08080962568002867,0.04787490630085976,0.07065558989426082,0.06737354108896004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17908401608263905,0.0949433589173169,0.0,0.11292711360399728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19440075340373372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792352223928293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631655437576808,0.1851819784331964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915258077826876,0.0,0.059500424004351224,0.0,0.0,0.07438448914548225,0.07454877276733288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176085402364176,0.0,0.0,0.16978598941862127,0.0,0.08505727189265959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05708245654768392,0.0640674769173323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08041555876377794,0.11680128866010525,0.0,0.08801171775326673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067757729069654,0.08570124240993379,0.0,0.0,0.09847076236019893,0.0,0.09436684332082976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079311886178422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668792779620098,0.0,0.09516597566233363,0.08647001695340495,0.20904985764076486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13454658349740434,0.0,0.0,0.08806478509321462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667433336992687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05596457987576575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04912037811766911,0.0,0.0,0.0804938758092778,0.0,0.22877072518769184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950591201765266,0.0,0.06686491523066099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12265384020756508,0.08554868868814475,0.0,0.059840895308800476,0.0,0.0,0.10849417523374738
mentalhealth,rbyyy,2020/02/17,"i get super stressed when things aren’t where they’re supposed to be i really love order and having things organised, clean and neat. im 16 and a female and maybe 5 years ago i wasn’t like this. my room has to constantly be clean, i can’t sleep if something is out of place, even if clothes are on the floor. i can’t work in my room if it’s a mess. if my space is a mess i must clean it or i can’t think about anything else. it’s progressively getting worst and im not sure what to do since it’s not bad enough to affect my life a lot. it’s not even just cleaning, everything has to be perfect, my school books and notes, the pillows on my bed, everything has to be organised and be in its place and if it doesn’t have a place, i’ll reorganise to make one for it. my boyfriend is a messy person, well not awfully but he’s no where as near as organised as me and when he comes over and leaves a wrapper on the side it drives me crazy. he’s very supportive tho and calms me and tries to be as clean as possible. even when something smells bad, it’s drive me crazy, like the smell of baked food or smoke or anything in my space makes me want to cry, it either has to smell nice or no smell at all, everything has to be perfect. ive broke down in tears over things being messy and i don’t think that’s normal. can someone maybe tell me if this is a problem or im just being stupid, i don’t wanna speak to a doctor since it’s not that serious and people have bigger problems which can be dealt with instead. although it would be appreciated if someone could tell me what im dealing with thank you :)",2.731150442477876,3.715454410029501,3.795745132743364,92.000803539823,74.22123893805309,7.1939115044247774,23.88448377581121,7.554174236665415,0.7708750678466081,1251,35,292,15,25,405,159,339,0.133,0.703,0.16399999999999998,0.8624,1,0,3,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,0,5,14,24,1,1,13,1,39,6,1,3,5,57,50,37,0,15,21,0,0,2,0,2,2,1,10,1,23,18,2,0,2,1,0,3,15,11,1,1,1,5,26,13,37,35,5,35,0,1,0,1,10,25,0,13,8,191,49,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826892078653333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388662150997332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16628511764559722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577668907216568,0.0,0.10760726216842996,0.0,0.0795040583654564,0.0,0.10938055763113218,0.0,0.10265941970733464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192118473980516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831837291772568,0.0,0.0,0.1028895645159771,0.0,0.1973088257414252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26847991237581204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120408792374004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404964905561333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4302405923532238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543756776731107,0.0,0.0,0.07033411493660698,0.09729649481822196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465672625020541,0.08987204718289532,0.0,0.1329367185915942,0.0,0.2000767761993202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756422762890288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747588990954202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903409008281088,0.08694671517699927,0.3121100248852237,0.0,0.0,0.1122580020282205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19056330553982714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379151705655725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10077714702070108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16474209454049865,0.0,0.0996488212197444,0.0,0.1687423819634913,0.15331833728218527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406501164173825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129986951219905,0.09385005731525004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17406921318729002,0.09167703827714256,0.0,0.0,0.19846341900386336,0.1276097237727579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760618411015595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216137761078426,0.058733040268068824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953159896884916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07249317495573007,0.0,0.0,0.0707365784191865,0.0,0.0,0.06412426397402418
mentalhealth,AnxietyAcorn,2020/02/17,"How do I get therapy without my parents finding out I recently moved out of my toxic family\`s house. I often struggle with eating and often think about life and how pointless it is. My life growing up sucked and I know I need therapy and i have tried calling my dad to ask him to let me use his insurance to get it. My parents are stereotypical boomers and don\`t believe in therapy, my dad responded to my plea by stating ""My money pays for real sickness."" and claims that my problems are because I don\`t try enough and ho i should be giving all of my time to strangers and how I should be praying to God for help. I\`m tired of praying to God, he obviously hasn't helped and I need to take this into my own hands. What do I do? Please help.",3.385720720720723,5.081259013513517,4.448378378378378,85.13693693693695,73.72972972972974,7.365765765765767,29.90090090090089,8.07648339933343,2.0793630630630635,586,26,116,9,12,191,89,148,0.07,0.794,0.136,0.7964,2,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,6,3,1,1,0,0,13,7,1,4,2,31,24,12,0,5,1,4,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,5,13,1,0,3,0,2,2,2,3,0,0,0,1,25,0,22,19,3,10,2,0,0,1,14,5,1,2,2,82,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367710321127652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716586941072152,0.0,0.0,0.161101674783292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600960237684538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14631529435660348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477477285953632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306910080849907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494135909839948,0.1371698125705641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875311736103616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16499219420686434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858400858613772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462177891818429,0.2019972729699954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519765996326351,0.0,0.2120517447175104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31754874109533754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15696096793419528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682289199873904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275484426284728,0.0,0.0,0.14118617243589712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14948503923448653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075112922478758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4905673524238202,0.0,0.0,0.09162273609963124,0.0,0.0,0.08337909009101005,0.16434689908629024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19416274504154207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12349814769323535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783803634683536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MoyMan1,2020/02/17,"How do you get over the little betrayals and the fact that very few people truly understand you? You know the ones: when pals flake on plans that you made to go get coffee during your lunch break just one too many times. When it makes you feel that you don't really matter to most of your friends.

Or when those very few who are closest to you just don't understand your feelings, or what's going through your head, despite you trying to make it clear to them over months, or even years. ""Get over it"" can only be heard so many times before you begin to feel hopeless and alone.

This is a genuine question. I spent my day at work, putting on ""the mask"" - not too outgoing, not hopelessly shy. Balanced. Not too happy. Not too sad. It hit me like a tidal wave of sadness, lethargy, and depression as soon as I got home. And I feel like a waste of space for feeling the way I do, because as I am told by those closest to me, I have nothing to be sad or depressed about. 

Everybody has problems. Some have much worse problems than me. Why can't I get over it? Why can't I get over the little jabs that my friends, whether intentionally or not, throw at me? Why can't I accept that my closest relatives will never understand me above a surface level, and react with bewildered impatience whenever I am down?",4.873058823529412,5.699998188235295,5.067843137254903,85.44529411764707,69.07843137254902,8.19607843137255,29.117647058823533,8.313332769828598,1.884764705882353,1018,36,206,14,17,320,144,255,0.146,0.7509999999999999,0.102,-0.9053,0,1,0,0,1,2,35.0,0,13,1,2,14,15,0,0,10,0,18,2,1,6,3,44,43,19,0,2,13,0,5,2,3,1,0,1,1,0,15,6,1,0,11,0,1,4,11,9,0,2,5,6,32,6,30,34,5,35,0,7,0,0,21,18,0,8,13,142,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185152720637098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975564385379397,0.0,0.09737175023876987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07379807170964565,0.0,0.19711728551697905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558012859855083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892969692137561,0.08174902341533767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17681711936899194,0.0,0.2989255229729289,0.0,0.13006674389596345,0.0,0.09152035785837732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218131735765924,0.0,0.0,0.11743849265487455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147829128762938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288789583120771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118097210743098,0.22937842884998025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827670902796367,0.1527662168511795,0.2320287109344895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913371672857177,0.0,0.08411943108287487,0.0,0.08825569553614385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979895130389487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508185457496626,0.08702939343525737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933155630322135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189886704471099,0.0,0.11503404924314052,0.12818811555836354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330697516212006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345044689077587,0.0,0.0,0.1093430477365844,0.0,0.07769065681530897,0.0,0.0,0.35737790848416195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888339498952303,0.0,0.0908294394382502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3097666199064107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330661537946081,0.0,0.11661424352471858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368935625508567
mentalhealth,aliensmack420,2020/02/17,"My anxiety is destroying my life. Sorry for any mistakes in text. 

Im pretty sure I’ve had anxiety my whole life. One of my earliest memories was me only four/five years old freaking out because my dad left me in the car to pay for gas, and I’m sitting there hyperventilating thinking I’m going to get kidnapped. In my teenage years I went though this stage where I thought the world was going to end. I was freaking out for legit six months. Barley getting sleep, barley eating, staying in the house, if I hear one noise outside I freak out. All of my relationships have been horrible, most of the guys I end up with are insane and criminals. I have PTSD from dealing with one of them for three years. It was nothing but emotional abuse and cheating. 
I’m now with a great guy and my overthinking is eventually going to push him away. If he’s with friends and doesn’t text back within an hour, my mind starts to wonder. It’s goes from maybe his phone died, maybe he’s ignoring me? But why? then it goes downhill and I’m assuming he’s cheating. In the mornings when he gets up to go to work my stomach turns to knots and I eventually start puking, because I’m freaking out thinking he’s lying about going to work, I feel miserable all day. Even though deep down I know he’s not cheating and I know he’s at work, it’s like my brain works against me. My ex use to lie about going to work and when he wouldn’t answer the phone, he was using drugs or cheating. So I’m assuming this is from PTSD. I really need help but all of the doctors around my area are booked up for months and I don’t know how much longer I can take dealing with this. 

Once again sorry for mistakes or bad punctuation in the text, I wrote this in a hurry.",2.539691283852484,4.467138203438398,3.6774359922358815,88.74903872816341,76.70773638968481,6.68087623625104,24.725113226730752,7.601502580125103,1.1464887882429051,1359,47,284,19,31,440,178,349,0.20199999999999999,0.731,0.066,-0.9931,0,0,1,0,1,0,34.0,0,0,1,5,16,18,5,1,11,0,18,8,3,3,4,54,51,24,1,6,8,2,1,1,1,1,4,1,0,2,8,20,1,1,11,1,1,9,4,14,0,5,10,2,35,4,52,40,6,54,0,1,0,0,25,24,0,8,19,166,43,8,0.0,0.1072990001863188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061584025198748976,0.0,0.13855657370726654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061775661435963,0.0,0.0,0.0850842665184522,0.06963518548612707,0.07561396435468026,0.11040928562069573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109510659241423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584038217375273,0.1867271301805064,0.0,0.0,0.09398716519913597,0.0,0.0,0.0926921776166114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502105333997312,0.09266566853807673,0.0,0.10186800906255387,0.16041887270653185,0.0,0.0,0.05981414223038845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045789946072422295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996656742197742,0.0,0.1419418628594833,0.0,0.3088046102763249,0.0,0.0,0.09984291387194902,0.0,0.17933762440829334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020679001943751,0.0,0.060700577123090176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918353151465197,0.10449428439435897,0.0,0.0,0.0978205304081058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14930851331826805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839389632410656,0.0,0.12793066114477736,0.04424312767845079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18195973804436613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143996207155833,0.0,0.1445685371605323,0.0,0.06657214943170807,0.06714922310521544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689493140349844,0.0,0.09502767097103874,0.0964436319977249,0.1840977571532733,0.06887509473304512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921322560796364,0.0,0.0,0.21171999936083247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801516774490746,0.0,0.0,0.0972277379473663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906255775908297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027494057791427,0.12819791752928775,0.0965250983234144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535189425243081,0.0,0.06808998208526874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605460838929613,0.1779498264671032,0.07189466416522776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098503466603573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15642983147498002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395019054189515,0.08171647320917629,0.1011072025417124,0.0,0.0,0.09820864795790034,0.3296444338899205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749533528575647
mentalhealth,Misssarahx,2020/02/17,"What’s wrong with me man this sucks so much I’m not suicidal yet but I’m scared I may become suicidal if this doesn’t fucking stop. The last couple of months have been HELL. Look how many posts I’ve made about it I cannot shake it off! All I think about all day is fucking how the hell i exist how the hell is any of this real how does the universe exist how did it suddenly come here how did it suddenly exist how does anything exist what if it ends any second my mind feels like it’s going to explode I have an extreme fear of infinity. I have an extreme crippling fear of the universe and constant anxiety dread and ocd about it. I just want to focus on normal stuff like what plans can I make with my boyfriend this year where can we go what fun stuff can we do, but all I can think about is the universe could end any second and there’s nothing I can do! I feel so out of control. I have panic attacks how anything exists. I feel sick I feel scared I feel depressed I’m so fucking terrified. I feel like I’m going to be trapped in an eternal torture I’m fucking freaking out I can’t cope please help I can’t do this shit for the rest of my life I want to feel normal again please",0.9796720809071396,3.0842601713147424,2.4196215139442216,94.90965292675452,82.74501992031874,4.97707631014404,21.60603738890592,6.093298490706669,0.13219080600674227,937,30,207,7,26,303,118,251,0.3,0.588,0.11199999999999999,-0.997,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,0,2,21,25,11,7,10,0,25,7,1,11,3,48,53,18,2,7,6,0,7,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,18,10,0,2,9,0,0,5,5,21,0,2,4,8,25,4,22,46,5,25,3,1,1,4,4,6,9,3,16,132,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20278781320897316,0.0,0.07604132320880748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635967418358081,0.0,0.0,0.11308273510185858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978034993831487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562496882526498,0.0,0.1074169284010498,0.1114864249090132,0.07936343303361752,0.10998507038410284,0.0,0.06410527868213267,0.0,0.08561374456264996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739725816089145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17607917144432375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22370702094819986,0.3518201406241938,0.14202387153558796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675776706879303,0.0,0.0,0.16947525873440644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662624631192038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102490103306724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020970923385544,0.14568659782278548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347161891586563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405541969079087,0.06635079127128454,0.10077678746968764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003664499495314,0.0,0.07934075277636572,0.0,0.07307100913648032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19478331559656104,0.09537772748365883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11662539605872713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822440981886507,0.0,0.0,0.09519846854969424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313984712846388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199035039057606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203347033797844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310350140118837,0.0,0.0,0.2275802190957561,0.2174566357823601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12738401001524224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172583086702126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867914670566664,0.0,0.06401084214266534
mentalhealth,Pord870,2020/02/17,"Question about seroquel Long story short I have been dealing with anxiety and depression basically my whole life.  About 2 years ago I accepted I needed help and got connected to the local mental health facility.  I have now been through their mandated short term therapy and am as they put it just ""working with the doctor(psychiatrist)"" meaning a purely chemical approach.  About 2 months ago I was put on seroquel and my dose has been increasing since.  I am at 250mg a day (plus other medications venlafaxine and methylphenidate) and just feel constantly depressed.  Before my moods would shift up and down but now I am just a constant 3 (1-10 scale 10 being super happy 1 being super depressed) with occasional shifts down to 2.5 or 2.  I have nightmares every night I have 0 ambition and am constantly struggling with intrusive thoughts and an intense self loathing.  Should I expect this to pass or do I need to contact the dr and get something changed?",6.986862745098037,8.742948411764708,6.663235294117648,72.52289215686277,64.88235294117646,9.901960784313726,36.51960784313725,10.125756701596842,4.075725490196079,770,38,123,18,12,241,112,170,0.084,0.797,0.11900000000000001,0.7906,0,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,3,8,9,0,1,7,0,18,5,0,0,1,32,25,15,0,5,6,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,3,15,0,0,5,0,0,5,0,4,0,0,6,1,16,4,19,15,3,26,0,3,0,0,7,8,0,3,13,82,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24709182762831244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066201003908992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859630993931325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474383430709344,0.0,0.0,0.4518386795434713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988417034652421,0.14368762760843284,0.3601257443289706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14265435436955906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742791435410635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047126695627122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728167335686923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114694631627082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836534059165768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14814717180588166,0.0,0.0,0.0934189039680328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984433980241742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334087752402545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15181825048888584,0.0,0.1404038149575302,0.14045538342754713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111246341714446,0.0,0.0,0.2066868923527223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079228701622458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28021707988528544,0.15612985743829275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14539662177206894,0.0,0.0,0.11529093384343947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729628228832072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570310776626907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15938537658541202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11064673592552264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560517695848594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014653341786589,0.0,0.0,0.09900670749130094,0.0,0.0,0.08975175769385471
mentalhealth,Algernon96,2020/02/17,"Friend's friend is in midst of what he calls bipolar/OCD episode but I'd love some input Note: I'd posted this to r/ocd but it was removed, which I understand in terms of it seeming like I'm fishing for a third-party diagnosis. I'm not exactly, but I get it. I'm hoping it might fit better here. 

My question is about a friend’s boyfriend. He’s apparently having intrusive thoughts, but those thoughts specifically revolve around her past relationships. She’s in her 40s and he has started obsessing over what he terms her “hedonistic” and “promiscuous” phase in her 20s. She was actually a pretty normal college kid so I’m confused about the problem but whatever. So he had some sort of episode in which he could not stop fixating on this. He went to his therapist and he’s asked my friend to take down pictures in her house, but the pics aren’t of ex-boyfriends. They’re of her and her friends during her 20s. It reminds him of “that time period.” One of the pics is with me at an event overseas. My friend was single. No hooking up took place at all on that trip but he says her facial expression in the pic is a trigger for him.

He, by the way, has nearly the exact number of past partners and apparently has ruined relationships before this over this same issue. One of the relationships was with a woman who’d only been with one other man, and that was her ex-husband, so hedonism does not apply.

I’m trying to wrap my head around what to say to my friend. For me, this seems like controlling behavior that has maybe more to do with being an asshole than having mental health issues, but maybe this scenario is more common than I realize?

There have been other issues that seem, to me, to point more toward control issues than mental health issues. Mind you, I have MI issues. My husband does. This friend does. I volunteer at a suicide prevention place. MI issues are not completely foreign to me, and they're absolutely not something stigmatized in my mind. But here are some of what I consider red flags: He told her he was laid off from his last job and he's had trouble finding work. In reality, he was fired for behavioral problems in 2015 and hasn't worked since. He told her he's living off smart investments he'd made at his previous job, which likely \*was\* actually a good-paying gig. In reality, he does live off some investments, but his parents pay his rent. (He's 37.) He doesn't want her improving the house she owns because he thinks that means she'll never leave it to live with him. He wanted to move in together after they'd dated for three months, but she wisely said that was too soon. He took offense and called her an asshole.

She doesn't have an issue with her past. That he fixates on previous lovers is his problem, not hers. She's never been married, and she hadn't dated anyone at all for at least a year prior to him. She's had four longterm relationships in the past 12 years, and that's her sexual history during that time frame. He keeps sending her articles like one on Slate called something like, ""What does your number of sex partners say about you?"" He also sent her a poem he'd written about wanting to die and she's the reason why. He's currently \*entertaining\* the idea of in-patient treatment, he says, though he hasn't taken any steps in that direction. 

TIA.",4.062822318526546,5.945784912363074,4.751169796557122,82.88615520043338,72.33333333333334,7.794883832912003,26.842452148790173,8.502166056373571,1.9117903936439151,2625,93,498,46,52,842,287,639,0.079,0.8009999999999999,0.12,0.9827,8,0,2,0,0,1,86.0,0,3,1,5,16,28,1,2,24,0,47,7,2,5,6,83,80,29,2,9,17,2,1,5,11,2,2,5,1,5,36,21,0,5,13,1,4,9,15,8,0,6,28,7,62,20,83,44,15,75,0,1,1,3,110,39,0,12,30,309,98,6,0.0,0.0,0.1087994420072384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0445797827289818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037908959181849784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03897866037049292,0.0,0.0,0.09925090914285163,0.052114665314235455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033982035831405626,0.0,0.047435449273694696,0.0,0.0,0.049302504562550566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17076764930732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844826202607607,0.0,0.12504699166071384,0.044508372013990674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05785519211602616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439170058080768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509505216848145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34455165799039245,0.0,0.02912480559674525,0.0,0.0,0.0467568132704459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057211127944698285,0.11851005578226212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05536801685016784,0.0,0.12864601003452528,0.0,0.06293006273255268,0.0,0.4654718719438196,0.1106379281515204,0.04954930237398628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04544015171381193,0.0,0.05902660300517217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361725638935526,0.0,0.147673312517712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050312632988974634,0.052747889670504686,0.0,0.0,0.11200801279231876,0.06072336418874856,0.0,0.0,0.11235702391084583,0.05913733394589471,0.1125744469795071,0.0,0.04449565253741878,0.05924881251303341,0.0,0.0,0.08598897644242003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054618909120387873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109880284420046,0.04239708506312583,0.0,0.0,0.0618989563866623,0.0,0.21286215405085446,0.0,0.0,0.11648469593868452,0.0,0.05269766559612447,0.0,0.053388931040535735,0.0567133753239244,0.0,0.16002319886982488,0.0,0.0,0.062447895186731175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057315821064596637,0.0,0.2393998987429079,0.0,0.0,0.05302688658355944,0.1773247394971254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15224626071754008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046113384529803965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583146235069336,0.0,0.0,0.03945706380130087,0.0,0.0,0.04660586638764119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060976702193643685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04191379734002466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472500577629364,0.0,0.035719566868980514,0.05476982615368008,0.08851165153419635,0.06501148319216306,0.0,0.0,0.1065347306918338,0.12387095483682012,0.03784764268245908,0.0,0.0,0.058033196171270875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864070059471468,0.04424830873909608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05167678365112557,0.050301785850696785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116700620673839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179675238614655
mentalhealth,ThrowRAhelplessgf,2020/02/17,"How can I cope when my boyfriend has been deeply depressed for over half a year and it’s seriously affecting my mental health too? It’s almost like living with a stranger sometimes now, and that’s so heartbreaking and painful. My own mental health is deteriorating with him. 

He used to say the most beautiful things to me. Tell me how much he loved me and wanted to do everything for me. How much he wanted to please me. How he’s never felt this way about anyone. How he wanted nothing more than to make me the happiest person I could be. 

He was never perfect, and his anxiety got the best of him sometimes. Before me, he was alone and simply “existing”. He would cry when he felt overwhelmed or if he thought he had said something to hurt me. He’d always pick himself up though. That first 15 or so months together he was genuinely happier. I thought I was the light in his life. 

Now he is so consumed by anxiety, bitterness, anger, self-loathing, lack of interest, and it’s almost like his emotions have died. He doesn’t cry anymore. He just gets angry. It’s been that way for over half a year. 

We barely have sex, and he used to want me every night. We barely go out. He hardly leaves our room. He doesn’t really talk to anyone other than me and his mom and sister. He struggles to enjoy watching movies and listening to music, which were two of his greatest passions. 

Sometimes I feel angry that I let myself fall so in love with him. I feel so helpless and worthless and unloved. I feel like he doesn’t care about our relationship or me anymore. I used to be his priority 24/7 and now he seems to want to be alone most of the time. I’ve tried to encourage him to make some changes and get help, but he’s not really making an effort.

He says that he still loves me deeply, but he just can’t express it properly. He says that he wants to do things for me, but he’s just so anxious. He says he wants to have sex, but the drive just isn’t there. He says he wants to get out more... But how can I believe that if he isn’t making any real efforts? 

My therapist told me that I need to hold myself accountable by essentially giving him an ultimatum. I helped him set up an appointment to see a psychiatrist this Wednesday. (He backed out of the last one because he was too anxious.) If he refuses to go, then I will need to leave him. 

I can’t picture my life without him, but at the same time I know things will only get worse. I don’t want to be miserable. I don’t want to end up resenting him. I’m so tired of constantly thinking and worrying of him and putting my needs second. 

He has his semi-good days, and those are the days that I can recognize the man I fell in love with. When we do have sex, I feel so close to him. But those days occur less and less. 

What can I do? What is your advice? Anyone who dealt with this (and didn’t leave your partner), how did you get through it? Is this salvageable?",2.5709354015578856,4.4300026541095905,3.666293311845287,89.17252887456354,76.39726027397259,6.977652430835349,23.950980392156865,7.861635385654353,1.1328573462261615,2266,73,480,35,51,732,251,584,0.114,0.79,0.096,-0.8723,0,2,1,0,0,0,76.0,5,3,0,5,33,28,3,3,17,0,49,14,0,16,3,106,99,53,1,19,19,2,7,3,1,3,6,7,1,3,29,32,0,2,11,0,1,6,14,14,0,6,18,18,71,14,61,71,14,48,0,7,2,8,92,14,0,12,28,314,100,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637678815877159,0.0,0.0,0.13068988627228406,0.13517207562304087,0.0,0.0,0.05429862284907009,0.0,0.0,0.04437664732858883,0.0,0.09984206434414583,0.14744250635689973,0.12943379574153194,0.1368865541497414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05017820868327235,0.0,0.03977974737749506,0.0,0.055528462102957664,0.07352171174675917,0.06848265467572176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653333525694402,0.0,0.06903270809965857,0.0,0.0,0.07051907715768108,0.0,0.052101993055513884,0.0,0.1433623684443664,0.12625510226996345,0.0,0.05620531464119306,0.0,0.06772592843672387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340476199217774,0.057797876283443725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05498140283941376,0.0,0.058648320675863376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319825575865258,0.04661924570053536,0.1253129177691923,0.0,0.0,0.055507132539996035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17046909943906927,0.0625999663488037,0.07417352816984088,0.0547340432840133,0.05219157209895327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05845699260129501,0.0,0.0,0.138729183386781,0.0,0.0,0.0874800922784729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698584165260708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035863257380450715,0.053192744688354915,0.0,0.2072915849786197,0.0,0.06672917685639583,0.09218516999844163,0.09564306655974583,0.0,0.057622671534425185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355861008596022,0.0,0.17423684101870776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152637615460194,0.0,0.0,0.07642760617503179,0.05208710349541472,0.0,0.09594204950724908,0.14516056960447307,0.10065964785333913,0.0,0.0,0.06123879028492514,0.0,0.06261535703602081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04421948287622356,0.04963049717564708,0.06943750063313996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05697944537030119,0.0,0.0716320240337256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06560079107424896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427616603848458,0.0836099501588597,0.0,0.0,0.07006104299811791,0.0,0.0,0.0620738605236714,0.2594728791401839,0.0,0.0,0.05200096951141333,0.05940705279851467,0.0680767454408974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050237630056820665,0.19362099588362527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521139129677072,0.0,0.0,0.06822024649858406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05245069052114445,0.057037043913996464,0.0,0.0,0.07576780836680579,0.1300605263593134,0.04181372044721349,0.06411416488146864,0.10361271924565453,0.07610316200156686,0.0750027295330706,0.0,0.06235536762535573,0.0,0.04430486955553439,0.0,0.06374610340286659,0.0,0.0,0.16908195203137172,0.0,0.0,0.3848996540666811,0.10359512021324598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290492255690913,0.0,0.0,0.06627112782661568,0.06650193291533481,0.046356334422905175,0.0,0.0,0.08404607324337983
mentalhealth,DaChumpis,2020/02/17,"Im done with is world My spark is fadeing I can feel my light leaveing my body, my family is nice but sometimes treats me like shit. I don’t wanna live like this anymore, I could just run away from this life and start a new. No one cares abb me anyways, no one whould know I was gone any ways, no one whould miss me. I just don’t wanna handle this life anymore. I’m done",-0.08843055555555424,1.9645924625000009,1.299166666666668,101.58027777777781,86.875,4.055555555555556,16.38888888888889,5.033348758259628,-1.0354027777777777,287,6,70,1,9,91,52,80,0.171,0.674,0.156,-0.3291,0,1,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,0,1,0,10,4,2,0,0,10,17,2,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,2,0,3,4,2,12,5,5,12,0,8,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,5,42,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283501678480806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3743601738461501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17732812776739393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096484012574743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19243375202479365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506941140545912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862945900943714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17792796171319014,0.0,0.09543298355673817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038723752848117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372696860752548,0.0,0.0,0.1998491798963231,0.0,0.0,0.2666263170985721,0.18441837295716668,0.0,0.16666152151006755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18228697209054745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3836868076554017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19373964593976206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866694069710688,0.0,0.13359165935935555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981360544385036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Botanical-Echo,2020/02/17,"Mental health is a bit of a mess I’m not too sure what’s the matter with me at the moment. I’ve been at my new job about two months, I love it but it’s very demanding, I’ve noticed when I’ve had a stressful day - which is most days. I get a tight and heavy feeling in the front of my head and feel like I need to take deep breaths. I wouldn’t class it as a headache, but I’m not sure what it is, I suffer from anxiety and it tends to get triggered when I’m stressed upset and or scared. I hope I don’t sound stupid but I was wondering if anyone knew or had an idea as to what’s going on?",0.6186702849389434,1.6916756567164164,2.457924016282228,99.13761872455903,79.74626865671642,5.7682496607869735,19.64450474898236,6.1124844417494595,-0.36543880597014944,454,10,120,3,11,151,83,134,0.24600000000000002,0.6659999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.9725,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,12,1,4,9,0,9,4,2,1,2,27,24,14,0,4,8,0,3,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,9,5,0,1,5,0,0,2,4,7,0,1,5,4,11,5,14,18,2,14,0,1,0,1,1,5,0,6,8,69,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13746055360272405,0.0,0.0,0.12564177659183862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961723653729445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317673266233279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817109406833996,0.12836888669385274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187758752265232,0.0,0.1021206273314741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18441135963811414,0.19099955989961356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784703716674697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028454751292364,0.0,0.0,0.17831225751822102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778630506041299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16217511155240308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18108287922866653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14342496079332934,0.0,0.0,0.13323610905011374,0.0,0.17354344346369988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045755703360469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798986754877341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4116631715216061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3387069504119816,0.0,0.13510274369248118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17552871570384995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14826112230660315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948635817942433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Inevitable_Part,2020/02/17,"I keep letting my mom drive drunk I'm a 26m who lives with his mother. She has a drinking problem. I let her drive when I knew she was too drunk to drive. That was about a year ago. She wasnt stumbling, but she was slurring her words. I felt terrible, and vowed to never let her drive like that again. Well, last week, she called me on the phone asking when I would be home, because I was working late. Her words sounded slightly slurred, but sometimes she slurs her words even when shes sober. She sounded fine fir the most part. But I still asked her if she had been drinking. She said no, she just got off work. I said I believed her, and than I hung up. Several minutes later, I was sitting in a parking lot waiting for my boss to call me, and my mom pulled up next to me. She started talking, and sounded fine for the most part, but I wasnt sure. She kept trying to talk to me, and I kept giving her one word replies. I just wanted her to shut up, and leave, because I didnt want to discover that she was in fact drunk, beaver then I would have made a scene, but I didn't want to make a scene if she wasnt drunk. Well, I'm thinking she was drunk, and now she thinks ""oh, he cant tell when I'm drunk, so I can drink, and drive all the time now"" last night she came in my room. She said she was going to take food to a friend. On of her words sounded a little funny, but I often worry too much, and think shes been drinking when she hasnt, so I just let her go. She returned about 30 minutes later. I went down stairs about 30 minutes after she got home, and she was drunk, so I think it was likely she was at least buzzed when she was driving. I was so angry at her, and at myself for letting her drive, I took a plate, and smashed it. That was last night, and I feel like I'm not much better than her, because I ket her drive when I was suspicious shes been drinking. I know how messed up drunk driving is, and I should know better, and put more effort into preventing my mom from driving, when I suspect she had been drinking. It's just, I've expressed countless times about how I feel about her drinking, some especially driving, but she just keeps doing it. I know I need to really step up now. Do you think I'm a bad person? Can I redeem myself?",3.046363636363637,3.773041847133758,3.755556842308433,93.5583729009844,73.20382165605095,6.303570739239532,24.46381007527504,5.760197766056111,0.3436929936305737,1734,48,400,7,33,550,200,471,0.146,0.797,0.057,-0.9898,1,0,7,0,0,0,68.0,0,1,0,5,35,15,0,0,14,0,47,16,0,5,4,79,90,39,0,10,15,4,3,3,1,3,0,7,3,1,9,18,16,6,13,15,0,19,10,4,2,1,39,10,93,11,42,42,11,72,0,0,0,0,69,20,0,7,35,272,102,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315262086654952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320517564185258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948492910555735,0.13028721448069,0.0,0.0,0.0802664643764317,0.0,0.12601728784476854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454941367128913,0.08148301254914465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4885371219522641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047055329534036655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204520273765383,0.05089601337312557,0.06840445231112946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614731828640043,0.0,0.05504216500715603,0.0,0.0,0.06834277724938256,0.08097807729267431,0.0,0.11395907040521973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429250754244995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266481034822114,0.0,0.0,0.1174598687609162,0.17421766081775167,0.0803652070289179,0.07543605023112496,0.0,0.3642539713616367,0.0,0.1044171934042181,0.07140420212080954,0.06290887415575769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06056825085254861,0.0,0.06741184910169001,0.047555255653125385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503168213583337,0.0,0.0,0.10474360452189704,0.05282578171897895,0.05494699352480971,0.0,0.07576773864206576,0.13371345857102918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048276100524619316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429845265300793,0.0,0.0,0.06220663955373315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816992933977949,0.0,0.07161889236153493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045640090025768236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20330522220126976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048431138839453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046114859309931,0.0,0.05042616202438113,0.0,0.056894751759140286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714568429206576,0.0,0.053565869634107866,0.1145248493869639,0.0622695220866042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22824818839111685,0.0,0.0,0.08308473234101273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791535942736615,0.04836932042783282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260629015741298,0.0,0.05714683721898449,0.0,0.1281120257248757,0.0660429746727539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10373150487391307,0.07235072462952381,0.0,0.101217966153844,0.0,0.0,0.0458781561506971
mentalhealth,rodnahs,2020/02/17,"it feels like it feels that the only purpose for mankind, is to make babies, support an endless war, and make spend money. that's it. no deep philosophical purpose. just bullshit production and hatred.

I don't belong on this planet. I don't make babies. I don't support wars. and I hate money to the point for 2 years of my life I lived on 1.50$ a meal and lived under a tree,.",0.8314141414141432,3.1912826753246786,2.6116017316017337,91.57708513708515,85.88311688311687,4.461183261183262,20.243867243867246,5.82211442006289,0.026008369408369703,294,9,60,2,9,97,50,77,0.213,0.6579999999999999,0.129,-0.8392,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,5,0,4,2,0,3,0,10,12,4,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,2,0,3,0,4,3,0,0,0,2,6,3,8,12,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,35,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24234705092482006,0.1712049973642542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366033635799704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692708831883276,0.11708019375699193,0.0,0.4232281831217729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4799018751662462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18226354825053956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22654537456452875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5439007497191839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543258318735895
mentalhealth,labradoodle1000,2020/02/17,"Alcohol and drug abuse resulting in BRAIN FOG? Looking back at my younger years, it is very evident to me that I’ve dealt with mental illness since young age. English wasn’t a strong suit in school so bare with me through this post. This is the first time I’ve put my past into writing. I’ll be as brief as I can. 

Starting with OCD. I remember being under 10 years old. Befor bed I would check each door to make sure it was locked probably 5 times. Than brush my teeth a very specific way. Than before ide turn the lights off in my room. I would scan my room 10 times. Making sure the closet was shut, then making sure the curtains closed, the things on my desk organized the exact way I liked. I still deal with OCD do this day.
I brush my teeth that very same way. I check to make sure the doors on my truck are locked too many times after parking it. I still go around the house making sure the doors are locked to many times. I’m leaving out a lot of things but you get the idea.

The next thing would be social anxiety. Around the 10th grade is when it really started to get bad. I believe smoking weed was the main culprit for introducing anxiety to my life. I started smoking weed in late grade 8 occasionally. By the end of grade 9 I was getting high all day. It changed me from being a popular, social kid too an extremely introverted person who only cared about getting high. I slowly pushed all my friends out of my life. The worst part about it is I knew the weed was giving me anxiety but I still kept smoking for another few years or so before I quit. The more secluded I got, the more depressed I got. School became to much for me and I was switched to a co op program where ide work from home and meet with a teacher once a week handing in my work. 

I eventually sought out a psychiatrist for the drugs I thought were the answer. Benzodiazepines. I told him all the so called side effects I was experiencing with drugs like Paxil and cymbalta. Eventually getting my way and getting the benzo’s. starting with clonezapam, then Valium, and lastly Xanax. With the help of these drugs I went back to a program in college where I finished my credits and got my diploma. 

At this point my depression was maybe at an all time low. I just felt as though I was a useless part of society. No friends. No ambitions. I just wanted an escape from reality. At this point I had quit weed. So I then found alcohol. I was drinking everyday, by myself. And drinking to the point of passing out. On top of that I was mixing the benzos with the alcohol. This I believe resulted in brain damage. After 2 episodes in the hospital and an almost overdose. They took me off the benzos thank god. I think they just made my anxiety worse after getting off them.

I continued to drink heavily for another year and a half. I did a one year course in college during this time. 

Then I decided to get sober for almost a year. I got so tired of getting past out drunk every night. The following year was one of the best in many. I went back to school got a truck license. Got in with a union who put me through a heavy equipment operating coarse. During that coarse I met some friends. And I did drink with them only on weekends. But I was happy. 

The union then got me a job as an apprentice. During that year I rekindled my relationship with some old friends. Only drinking with them on weekends. The thought of hanging out sober with them brings on a lot of anxiety so I’ve never done it. To this day my relationship with the few friends I have is only drinking with them on weekends. I’ve gotten past out drunk a handful of times and embarrassed myself. My one friends parents actually said they didn’t want me around anymore because of this. :( I don’t drink during the week. Only once a weekend or once every other. But it’s usually like 15 beers or so..

Eventually completing my apprenticeship and making over 6 figures I am doing well in that aspect for my life. But the past 6 or 8 months of my life I just have been feeling down. I think I also have some kind of a bipolar disorder too. I probably should have mentioned that somewhere above. Some days I feel great! But the majority for days I feel depressed. A lot of which stems from my lack of communication skills with co workers ⭐️.

Another thing that’s come up in the last six months that is ABSOLUTELY DEBILITATING is brain fog. This is the main reason for me writing this post. I feel as though I have this pressure inside my head. Sort of behind my temples. Just like a cloud almost inside my head ALL THE TIME. I can’t even think. I can’t recall memories well. I can’t have meaningful conversations. I have no mental clarity. And it’s negatively impacting my communication skills at work and with my family greatly. Which Is making me more anxious and more depressed. I feel as though I’m getting dumber and dumber everyday. I eat healthy, take supplements, workout, do cardio. I really don’t know what to do. I believe it could be a brain damage as a result of my drug and alcohol abuse. But I don’t know. I had a good 2 or 3 years after quitting the daily drinking. This brain fog is killing me. I did go to the doctor once about it and he took blood work and I got my eyes checked but nothing came up.

I don’t know what to do :(",2.3933429858429847,4.782320039575296,3.6002779922779915,86.82400128700131,79.29922779922781,6.649369369369371,24.92458172458173,7.793537801064563,1.4406140025740028,4155,156,822,70,105,1347,390,1036,0.11699999999999999,0.778,0.10400000000000001,-0.9686,4,0,18,0,2,0,109.0,0,1,8,15,38,41,1,2,72,0,66,44,13,13,12,141,137,57,1,8,18,1,8,4,6,4,19,1,9,2,45,53,16,1,24,16,4,16,14,13,2,6,47,16,122,28,132,80,29,152,0,8,3,0,38,58,0,16,76,545,167,20,0.0,0.08701539256771047,0.03583383553126624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569718577185732,0.11031059711902884,0.0,0.0,0.029365308734278943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551369461414225,0.14045511413246126,0.041483625552757836,0.036416792206561584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806688404661976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470721522678196,0.03066001910781225,0.022384428826742908,0.0,0.09373912528956968,0.12411402527508494,0.03853581811136268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20496067930591733,0.0374956571249838,0.041998381090538786,0.037438918189496816,0.0,0.03884533821972781,0.03163139267294618,0.038500664523471034,0.0,0.0,0.029318269525824333,0.0,0.0,0.11840817405383212,0.037857143373854256,0.12650898491952178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04208478567629905,0.037584908569790194,0.0,0.037577741439363,0.0,0.28777627676515666,0.21292016161343094,0.03757415964449127,0.0,0.0,0.03252339527765768,0.0,0.0,0.024253492848210868,0.0,0.06187707965936494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03461674644968609,0.0,0.09283474511009827,0.0,0.03525736428460706,0.0,0.0,0.03123437275574692,0.0,0.040262048111032525,0.17022064474785722,0.0,0.19184905260165536,0.03522557541640013,0.041738124840016634,0.030799348338345637,0.23494941180361156,0.080968791233709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03908957273478893,0.0,0.0,0.07537149498219507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024612925275541136,0.0775942852622574,0.03683357792798704,0.0,0.0,0.04237043757103194,0.0,0.04145288755765002,0.0,0.0,0.036439353435634994,0.0,0.04062570708977105,0.03823866950924868,0.060541751915349565,0.05986409095444412,0.041422236189228516,0.03888162558620411,0.0,0.0,0.10374688190597818,0.07175897476544439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030835906759421782,0.0,0.0,0.09365517063173642,0.0,0.03474575178333158,0.17157817084896765,0.11168623523625096,0.03689060012198304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401109861089059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05861978206749095,0.0,0.02699373576089936,0.0,0.028321053697450086,0.0,0.039052586082756746,0.034459629156525354,0.0,0.035234235897306065,0.0,0.07706381308289663,0.15642420683073374,0.07464812617876404,0.13963768059178833,0.0,0.0,0.04077368379461194,0.07952927872288773,0.14021519372464994,0.0,0.032062856693764866,0.0,0.0,0.10413800550893776,0.0,0.07033602889137583,0.0,0.07918165262599285,0.0,0.0,0.07382833404368518,0.0,0.1171700685144374,0.0,0.0,0.04704808607199279,0.03775471027198097,0.0,0.07884798340403637,0.04159708065490498,0.0,0.034929530841600456,0.0,0.0,0.11148908442441034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03037551308252292,0.0,0.0,0.07486369317949708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039636166301976,0.0,0.08797493090934053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17304281894231366,0.0,0.027609187927146627,0.0,0.0,0.03380723164072342,0.0,0.0,0.09758166864263272,0.07058689240405983,0.10823288647030617,0.05830382776165575,0.1927077637564534,0.04220472405499191,0.0,0.035087937470533466,0.08159548138910877,0.0,0.039941275318999436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04044235773747749,0.0908945831041731,0.04331731335613186,0.11658784924929826,0.0589098162318028,0.0,0.0660321398331844,0.06808039938352121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069316201376851,0.0,0.03742124780375821,0.07825540409127316,0.0,0.0,0.21282073439878044
mentalhealth,Justtomatojuice,2020/02/17,"Does having suicidal thoughts always means you have a depression? I have strong suicidal thoughts and am battling these thoughts every day. My wish to die is strong, however I don't feel all day long. Most of the time my emotions are kind of neutral.

This makes me wonder if it is possible to have strong suicidal thoughts without having a depression.",6.1023809523809565,8.35699415873016,5.4319365079365065,78.56028571428574,67.73015873015873,9.484444444444444,36.40952380952381,9.888512548439397,4.030291428571429,284,15,47,7,5,86,45,63,0.311,0.5429999999999999,0.146,-0.946,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,3,0,7,1,0,3,0,10,0,0,1,1,14,19,2,4,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,1,6,4,5,15,2,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133603211609489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20710270058768146,0.0,0.27658935536755797,0.0,0.166641455595143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405117964546782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806143772162548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528321000993046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118665191108139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672040757643314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14209525842871573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10717860011614444,0.0,0.0,0.17490270841645034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810132766430532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5268972086668927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5098837255335226,0.09362693125117344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18464219766022094,0.1547792418789343,0.17412624386596495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kartik-Anand,2020/02/17,"What would you guys suggest to someone dealing with self-hate? I feel too scared honestly to end it all, but it's much easier to destroy oneself slowly, that is what I am doing and frankly it keeps me on an even keel mentally. As atleast this way I am able to give an outlet for my self-hate.",6.546499999999997,5.16126331666667,6.7633333333333345,82.19500000000005,65.83333333333334,10.0,35.0,8.841846274778883,2.7115,229,9,49,3,3,74,48,60,0.107,0.8009999999999999,0.091,-0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,1,2,0,5,0,0,0,1,7,8,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,7,1,8,7,2,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,35,14,0,0.2582498386617697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662442439479222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22873270444118554,0.0,0.0,0.17057158282386312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057887796682832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477367772246448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557079422569478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295443224659107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26025509636076777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189843346023679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585531405490426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5388218078424812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188142502457151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20498670138917466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18345327583547266,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,needhelp7829,2020/02/17,"Why did i hurt myself after 2 years of not having done it? I’m 19 F, i didn’t hurt myself for 2 years but today I suddenly felt angry and sad for absolutely no reason at all. And I kept crying, i couldnt stop crying I dont know why. I just grabbed a pen and ran it through my thighs digging into my skin and my entire thigh is full of crazy swollen lines. And it burns so much. Why did I do this? After 2 years of being clean. I feel so embarrassed. I dont know what to do or say about it",-0.6842048929663598,1.170725954128443,2.0258944954128424,96.7163340978593,87.62385321100916,4.734250764525996,15.505351681957187,5.985473137389443,-0.7507620795107028,375,7,92,3,12,130,68,109,0.272,0.6779999999999999,0.05,-0.9794,0,0,0,0,0,4,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,12,4,3,1,1,19,19,9,0,1,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,6,6,0,2,5,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,7,5,15,0,12,10,3,12,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,1,8,61,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3811334070332815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17753685710729258,0.406649621579133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771995466411323,0.0,0.16657418474914482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3714416354786129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19068721619267845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12753249197554867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783729502077691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796337704592287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450424286024518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644448559759245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.469633572873149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3351587301877844
mentalhealth,losenkal23,2020/02/17,"student seeking help on this subreddit, bc i feel i got no one else I'm aware uni can be a very lonely period of time in your life, but now I don't know what to do.I've managed to make some friends and I'm on good terms with my roommate, but at the end of the day when I come back to my apartment, I'm always alone (she usually leaves for the weekend and all of my friends come and go by train and don't live here). I know I shouldn't complain because I don't have to work to have a place to stay and people would kill to be in my position, but the time away from my family seems to really be eating me up. I'd never been far away from them and now in my second year, it seems to be hitting me way harder than in the first. I don't look forward to spending time with my friends, and I never manage to laugh sincerely around them. They're good people so I feel guilty about this and try to be the best friend I can be, but at the same time, I feel like I'm not able to make any meaningful connections. I don't really know how to be myself around others, I thought the problem may be that I don't know my true personality. When I feel alone I try to drown myself in the schoolwork, but some nights it's just too much (a couple of times I've bought alcohol to help me sleep) and I'm prone to skipping because I just can't face the day. I feel like the only thing keeping me going is guilt because I want my parents to be proud and don't want to waste time and money. As a result, I haven't failed yet. However, this is all really taking a toll on me; I got out of being bullied in high school and took the next big step just for this? I value education a lot, I want to make it clear, but I'm afraid that this loneliness will be my life forever and I don't know what to do.

I thought about trying to make more of my true personality emerge, but I really wouldn't know how to start. I heard time alone can help, but this just feels like forced loneliness.

Overall I apologize for the sad, ranty tone of the post, I hope I'm not just screaming into the void.",4.911232876712329,4.070307257990868,5.779098173515982,86.13453767123289,68.88584474885845,9.217808219178082,27.610730593607308,8.472884824447931,1.5335004566210042,1601,41,373,21,24,529,198,438,0.134,0.684,0.182,0.9669,2,5,1,0,0,0,39.0,0,1,2,5,20,25,1,2,21,0,35,6,2,7,7,81,80,27,2,8,15,1,6,3,4,5,3,2,0,2,15,21,2,1,17,1,3,7,17,9,0,3,8,9,52,16,60,55,10,60,0,3,1,0,17,24,0,7,31,237,67,6,0.07914298840942828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457978568997204,0.0,0.24590480314709734,0.0,0.0,0.06585330636925864,0.0,0.0,0.05381994604712431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409080779446412,0.0,0.0,0.14871488567704946,0.060856072881721686,0.0,0.14473449346718145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305568360133248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634935343122132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757021135133465,0.0,0.10208136037601642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098303521156174,0.06611381140961556,0.0,0.07009719684725507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460896592681704,0.0,0.2401024375232194,0.16961930019963714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731898551084534,0.0,0.0,0.2445827060898127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995756832792341,0.1327627675283525,0.12659575536120551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914363060472958,0.08361891250614603,0.0,0.07860684502884037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07034592449896072,0.0875599906657624,0.0,0.26096949997119595,0.0,0.0,0.08380099738017596,0.0,0.0,0.11180206649962086,0.1159957994102645,0.0,0.06988470873228872,0.0,0.0664601775929485,0.0,0.0,0.06728453856564773,0.0,0.0,0.21131423727468024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817920278988858,0.0,0.12207990334364716,0.0,0.08416946603105471,0.07427033332918165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05362933718286755,0.06019180900501394,0.0,0.0,0.08787892268744972,0.0,0.0,0.10973556626305324,0.13820920958348545,0.08268757816143464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579710575359208,0.0,0.0,0.07572915141377026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20280409978847655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009692951283785,0.0,0.1440976084903527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920014452915322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05601781454291916,0.08435589533477042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059505677817455624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05257908481825388,0.0,0.0,0.12566138487898912,0.3230423909481374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793077217107235,0.16119868214340613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871648204958027,0.06530125396203998,0.14004175526401352,0.06282002039652006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05761703815050648,0.0,0.0,0.05622090824278917,0.0,0.0,0.05096548973087105
mentalhealth,zipzappbrannigan,2020/02/17,"My dad died last month and I just feel nothing anymore. My dad was told at the beginning of November that he had lung cancer and had only 6 months to live, in January he passed away.

Since his funeral I just feel empty all the time, like there's a void inside of me. Nothing matters to me anymore. Everything just feels so unimportant and I can't bare to live through another day.

My dad was my best friend and it all happened so quickly. I just feel so lost. I've suffered from depression for years and a few months before my dad was diagnosed I was put on antidepressants, they seemed to work but since my dad's passing I feel like they don't do anything anymore.

I don't know if I'm posting here for advice or to just get everything off my chest. My family and friends know how badly I've been struggling with the loss of my dad but I don't want to tell them that since his passing I've been having thoughts about ending it all. Part of me knows that I couldn't go through with it but I don't know how to get past this feeling of complete and utter devastation.",3.713738479262673,4.940935474654378,4.435780529953919,87.41652793778803,72.13364055299539,7.8213133640553,28.309043778801843,8.278499904357787,1.782189170506912,846,32,178,13,16,271,116,217,0.152,0.777,0.071,-0.9301,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,3,4,14,11,0,1,5,0,16,4,2,2,3,39,37,17,2,3,10,6,6,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,12,0,0,5,6,6,0,0,11,6,27,5,25,25,6,22,0,4,0,0,17,5,0,3,13,111,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257743278380153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080295968268398,0.0,0.0,0.3427585504781359,0.0,0.0,0.0948042695308264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823931297338008,0.0,0.09619173894117418,0.0,0.0,0.09803135299993736,0.0,0.12090101257335036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207907228590019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429798479274373,0.0,0.09922628560912132,0.11693110709065893,0.11956506891040558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203783425666292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20707846064128094,0.0,0.10860544560562814,0.0,0.3495080235234029,0.08230279677809718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17801489038441973,0.0,0.12038018579882635,0.0,0.06547391236755655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187579930845983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532556106071817,0.09390781833487724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256712761743076,0.0,0.20345704671297932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576035814809786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758676741327201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210854735156917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876189363783786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475627608370668,0.1099766381661438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033497574621833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581329760134496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048787152213768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858974171898443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043775053314908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069464152705386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146025903635777,0.06717722458038007,0.0,0.0,0.11008374486921953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795115951060139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387093997456224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418853289240936
mentalhealth,ComicV042,2020/02/17,I just want mind mind to shut up I just moved when i didnt want to and i want mi mind to just be quite for once and not think about anything i just want to go and and find a quite place in my head.,-0.4228723404255312,0.5717147446808539,1.0435638297872352,108.50875,82.40425531914894,4.7,13.877659574468085,3.1291,-1.834868085106383,151,1,46,0,4,48,28,47,0.0,0.8740000000000001,0.126,0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,18,8,5,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,6,0,8,6,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,27,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162961963874262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951620893639708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162496799564006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20157447770880066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5949577337957573,0.0,0.0,0.2087539411690294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20917143676377345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20520782047511346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4178148139334193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585231744703887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4633934787984984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway2232333099,2020/02/17,"I can't seem to get any further in my recovery. I'm maintaining at a level just above suicidal and I don't know what to do. Hi all  


So I had a really rough 2019. Had a few mental breakdowns and ended up at a psychiatrist and got diagnosed with depression, anxiety and severe OCD. Also had my relationship of nearly 6 years end. I had also started a new uni course and nearly failed it, but managed to pull through. Left my job of 5 years, too.   
Because of this, I've had to use everything I have to push myself to keep going. I've been suicidal, i've nearly relapsed cutting after 6 years.   
All that I can manage to do is wake up (usually in the afternoon), waste time (usually social media, gaming etc.), eat 1 - 2 meals which are usually junk or easy food, then go to sleep around 3-4 am.   


I want to fix my sleeping schedule but I hate being conscious for the amount of time that a normal day is. I woke up at 2:30pm today and I'm about to go to sleep around 2am. That's about all I can handle. I eat junk/easy food because making anything is like....not happening. My room is trashed even though I try to clean it once a week. I need to do laundry. I avoid anything I can, which includes stuff I enjoy. Some days, I do exposure therapy (<1 hour) which takes all of my mental energy. I'm trying to find work but haven't found anything yet. I volunteer once a week but i've hurt my foot badly and can't do that for another 4+ weeks. I see my friends a lot but I'm starting to get tired of them, too. I spend a lot of money on buying food and just things to get cheap entertainment so I can feel happy or at least not depressed for a bit.   


I don't know how to get back to actually being alive and living. At the moment I'm just floating in life. Like trying to get past the days. I feel annoyed when I wake up most of the time because now i have to be conscious again. I'm just really, really tired and I've had enough but the days keep coming. I'm grateful to be alive, I'm just really struggling. I feel like I'm drowning and every time i come up for air, another wave hits and drags me under. I need to breathe but I don't know how.",1.2984084372003863,3.149639158836692,3.4757031000319607,89.09961409395973,80.23042505592841,6.673250239693192,22.05225311601151,7.7094869923839395,0.9195192713326938,1652,51,360,27,42,565,212,447,0.124,0.764,0.11199999999999999,-0.564,1,1,0,0,0,0,63.0,0,0,1,2,25,16,3,2,17,0,34,17,7,4,4,62,77,30,3,4,15,0,4,2,1,0,4,0,2,0,13,17,6,3,11,2,4,7,7,10,0,0,10,5,40,6,59,62,14,67,0,4,1,0,6,25,0,7,37,218,53,5,0.0,0.0,0.07224245012693514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11840328115851215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05034283342880752,0.15525349525885762,0.05663262906329895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18276076491154145,0.13180451519831146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05692438148364853,0.06181182863761212,0.13538371981349226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082141755913716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754031343515898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19097250365491425,0.0,0.1275235946439975,0.0751387347131148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150202672612093,0.0,0.0,0.13113693951375666,0.07649261967044713,0.08256284646985426,0.04889601466083802,0.0,0.06237333758748356,0.0,0.06653325152759276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122951424690991,0.05288693630910525,0.0,0.0,0.06766193748515101,0.0,0.2685515485473446,0.0811699043528749,0.05719527487757641,0.0,0.19338769362802136,0.0,0.12621860139067895,0.0,0.0592084300805776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546434775469934,0.07880614695326772,0.0,0.07308914583580135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729044854918989,0.0,0.07925048056766015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734631985162377,0.13160225602403308,0.0,0.0,0.12205460086810226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043364357996656,0.0,0.05228946909254298,0.10850172913661504,0.0,0.06536970973270467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258750543665983,0.0,0.0,0.04941549662155019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492093442124477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097843845948662,0.0,0.07149848594711714,0.0,0.0,0.07253353041745766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767873844755784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066986403711409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18970165829209448,0.0,0.0,0.07948034900848673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05899220206667261,0.06739399083907996,0.0,0.08363265348652621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222499264535225,0.0754641045349309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104797411134926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739206796133646,0.08474646143914978,0.16195327056314168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055661230574431605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846595799214453,0.0,0.04918213976890321,0.0,0.07273394718522365,0.0,0.17266959262072165,0.17017283399671135,0.07017163730812866,0.0,0.0,0.15078421663565367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393801739839285,0.24460024738207084,0.0,0.043664720833926834,0.0,0.1781468295823206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05389460910519028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301837972258244
mentalhealth,An0therFakeAcc0unt,2020/02/17,"I almost don't feel anything (Sorry for mistakes, everything that I have learned in English is by myself without any lesson books just by playing games, watching videos, reading stuff, etc. Mostly because my interest in English raised after school and I had a bad time with learning basics in school) 

I made this fake account for obvious reasons.  
I wouldn't say that my life is bad or I been abused by anyone and I wanna die or whatever, but my current state is killing me inside. I believe that everyone who posts here have a bigger troubles than I have and I lucky enough right now. But still. I have complex mental problems that I really want to solve. I would try to describe most of my storyline and problems in this post for better understanding.   
Most of my early childhood (6-11 years old) I spent with thoughts about leaving my family or making suicide, because of being beaten for bad grades or bad behaviour, but I never had guts to do it.   
My parents got divorced because of my father used to abuse alcohol most of the time and used to realise his aggression in violation to me or my mother.   
Since then I have started to try become a ""perfect boy"", like that no one would never be disappointed in me. I'm always trying to act like I'm fine. It turned into that I always tried and still trying to hide my hobbies if they are against parents and relatives preferences. I keep my social media pages super clean because I am afraid that someone would see something that they don't like.   
I never had friends in real life until 10th grade, but they were more like bunch of freaks (we have from 9 to 11 class grades in middle school, on 10th grade classes are getting mixed for ""professional profiles""). Never had a relationships with anyone, but I had few unsuccessful attempts. Never been drunk and don't want to (because of Dad and being ""perfect"").   
My weight is really little, about 45-50 kilos for 173cm height and I'm almost 22 years old. I almost don't feel hunger until it's starts to hurt. I don't eat any type of meat. I'm not vegan, I just don't like it, but my body is weak because of that. I got used to be hungry.   
I was often disappointed in some things, due to which I had a constant denial of the new things, new food. I always trying to avoid conflicts, hate to watch politics, hateful people which is like to discuss aggressively about unfair things, because usually it's just provokes to bigger aggression.  
Right now I almost finished my university, but failing to complete my diploma project due to apathy, eternal weakness and completely screwed sleeping schedule. Right now my usual time when I'm going to sleep at 7-9am and waking up at 4-6pm. I feel sleepy and sick if I sleep less than 9 or 10 hours.   
I went to university because of my parents pressure. I don't really like it, I chose my specialization because only thing I had interest in is computers that's all. Also, we don't have any kind of career guidance in schools.   
I tried to reduce my time that I used to spend in internet with no reason like playing games, watching videos to be more productive, but most of the time I was just sitting in front of monitor by doing nothing. Then I tried to abstract completely from it to finish my diploma, but didn't realized I made my state much worse. I spent almost every day for month trying to type something into my diploma, but I did almost nothing.   
While spending my time in university I've found passion in art painting, especially environment but not only. I have pretty good knowledge in different types of art for beginner, but I have no skills in practice. It's really hard to study art without teacher. My attempts looks terrible for me and it pushes me away. I want to make very skillful arts that I can be proud of, I don't want to make casual arts  
I live in Russia, my country isn't good at insolvency, especially in art. I don't see any possibilities to earn money from drawing and I'm scared to move to foreign market because of my low level skills.   
Currently I work sometimes for freelance to design scenes for streamers for low cost.  
My mom always complaining about lack of money and forced me to find a job to pay my university, but our town doesn't have any except of low level job like cashiers. Work conditions usually kinda bad. I worked at McDonalds for 7 months in terrible conditions (tons of clients for small restaurant and no other fastfoods around and lack of employees). My muscles started to contract involuntarily periodically due to this experience.   
Also, due to moms lack of money I never felt this money belong to me. Most of my salary went to pay my university and some other things, part that I kept was less then 10% which I mostly spent on a bus.   
Most of the day I just waiting for next day. Im lack motivation. I don't care about my relatives lives, I don't feel almost anything except sadness. I still sometimes getting happy for short amounts of time by watching Pixar cartoons (which I really love), playing some games, mostly old ones and listening old songs. But I can't feel happy only by watching same movies or playing same games again and again.   
I don't blame anyone in this situation, but I'm so tired.  
P.S. I don't think about selfharm or suicide or anything like this",6.2440917284836885,7.015295334673367,6.674448432639393,75.34032384142938,66.00502512562814,9.05112865916886,33.18058546701763,9.064214713859089,2.947386854909469,4178,173,729,68,63,1358,413,995,0.193,0.693,0.113,-0.9984,10,1,3,0,3,3,115.0,3,0,3,18,27,71,9,4,11,0,65,21,6,13,10,154,120,57,4,19,37,8,8,10,1,4,7,3,1,1,41,30,6,5,21,21,13,7,33,37,0,2,28,19,109,34,145,82,32,125,0,8,8,3,30,48,1,33,75,485,150,33,0.0,0.10152730898566964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04578767569268544,0.30031761903764165,0.0,0.0,0.06852536511870079,0.14260002248665749,0.0,0.0,0.1456784393162471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987348424163799,0.0,0.10577196866842123,0.03814063444815407,0.0,0.0,0.040253760993289305,0.0,0.17886658564708316,0.2611757247652505,0.04731831699410284,0.0,0.04827101129934532,0.0,0.03789242476745863,0.0,0.047590513378190216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04368276120982239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476473809572456,0.04629961802335045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289335658105168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04446576363847863,0.04476332000351987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04384055744085369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04426975874753005,0.04778287513850088,0.0,0.0,0.03609828790244653,0.040939697726108185,0.03850581933923783,0.04191008275361306,0.04038992423255508,0.0,0.10831717898720764,0.0,0.04113738054974795,0.0,0.03915904124820238,0.0,0.05180766596257541,0.04697671616873854,0.0331015074557215,0.0,0.04476890229953197,0.0,0.024349482155225536,0.07187176574239443,0.06853322390525601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121740446265382,0.03838020202933102,0.08460002722234009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042193142269725384,0.0,0.04586585830726362,0.0,0.04627934649269996,0.0,0.08503298982691883,0.03808210615556614,0.04740102405738099,0.04461589036038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04536607487788904,0.0,0.0,0.06052458895345285,0.20931628843244549,0.04294138372944691,0.07566484954315038,0.0,0.035978538291153384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03866877914830322,0.08108088863704603,0.08579698760156056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04317711760703526,0.0,0.0,0.10035777877327494,0.06839604524001476,0.0455368584340989,0.03149559256589882,0.0,0.19826563678167491,0.08275885274499037,0.045565547162569435,0.0,0.0,0.0822207898915393,0.0,0.17983212697438272,0.0,0.05806500166703432,0.09775537999753067,0.0,0.0,0.14272103834542793,0.04639635250753495,0.0,0.02970293953228588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04830066771735006,0.0820662589383017,0.04358819753353471,0.0,0.08199268411783392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042856033526704265,0.04876635166582314,0.13723622427200627,0.08810243848443522,0.0,0.04599889363097074,0.0,0.10976675096953822,0.0,0.034071617712033424,0.04289475792504476,0.17344343935591344,0.06828294192900074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035441362859195316,0.04815894478702285,0.1286261428637541,0.04367451025017629,0.0363019543096974,0.06596748499213266,0.08474849182222195,0.047960841973028426,0.09097654378219654,0.0,0.10264687349971198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049046632456588336,0.09372972513024973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14231970820433545,0.027452986665045632,0.0,0.034013698964805106,0.1748805593565924,0.04924338020370127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617970565848452,0.046602446773291104,0.0,0.04460257221101485,0.0,0.14801535715298822,0.1415612903289543,0.03535114938336946,0.10108304123583384,0.0,0.0,0.052172984602283236,0.0,0.07943444878100167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260102098786759,0.0,0.09357378606557262,0.0,0.043662143860870216,0.09130638104965999,0.0,0.0,0.05518082828608276
mentalhealth,shaydakens,2020/02/17,"Not Okay For No Reason The worst thing is when you are a super happy person, and nobody can recognize when you’re not okay because you don’t want to share your weakness or vulnerability to everyone because you’re always known to be peppy, happy, high energy, and okay. 

It’s just really hard and lonely sometimes being that happy person. My cup is empty because I have been pouring into so many other people and things in my life that I can’t pour or focus on others right now, and I can only focus on myself - which I know others will come across as selfish. 

I’m just drained and it makes me want to hide and stay in bed all day and sleep. 

When the depression comes, it’s rough.",8.590222222222224,6.316500874074078,8.83092592592593,71.82416666666667,62.48148148148147,10.777777777777779,31.38888888888889,8.841846274778883,2.477666666666666,538,12,100,6,6,179,91,135,0.19899999999999998,0.648,0.153,-0.6447,0,2,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,3,0,1,7,13,0,0,3,3,12,3,1,2,1,24,19,15,0,2,6,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,11,11,0,0,3,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,1,2,11,8,12,15,2,16,0,2,0,0,6,8,0,2,5,71,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385916489694742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046011387780845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869541830138989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741772010830723,0.0,0.14345828362209526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591556611908403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5319201334786967,0.14920545997878054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598027507197175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153727510896624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764658153603733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111804031160082,0.16886616784727368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667673841134186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547205385343486,0.2908683453422559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670289829431986,0.1712518976486418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224172622706124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666807520243208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647325578846485,0.0,0.0,0.17753129310147686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22131074255883829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964833542580172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UrinalCam_003,2020/02/17,"Questions about asking tough questions in therapy and when is then proper timing? Hello all, not sure if this is the right place for this or not but I am realizing that I need to tell my therapist about what is going on in my head. 

I'm honestly considering suicide, and I remember back in the introductory sessions he asked me and I lied. He said, ""Have you ever dealt with suicidal thoughts or thoughts that you don't want to be alive anymore?"" and I responded ""Well, yeah kinda, I've thought it would easier not to have to do this if I was dead"" but ultimately I hid it so well I'm fairly confident that he has no idea to what extent it has been going on. 

My question is, I have an appointment in about 5 hours and I know I should say something to him about it but I have a vacation coming up this weekend and really don't want to get locked up before then. Should I just ignore it until I come back from vacation? How do I even breach the subject? I've thought maybe I could say something like this ""I've been having thoughts that should worry me but they don't"" but then I'm afraid he will find out that I'm considering suicide and have me locked up. 

I hate this so much! Please help me",2.639962458012249,4.506114497925314,3.966212211025489,87.06716459197789,76.21991701244814,7.412052953961669,24.33926101560957,8.269060116576782,1.4041095040505829,938,31,197,17,21,308,126,241,0.188,0.696,0.11699999999999999,-0.9659,0,0,2,0,0,5,22.0,0,2,1,0,15,9,1,1,5,1,28,1,1,1,3,51,50,24,4,10,13,0,0,1,0,5,0,3,0,0,18,11,0,1,13,1,0,4,7,4,2,0,9,3,27,5,25,34,3,27,0,0,0,0,20,12,0,8,12,139,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995940685733817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073085780667685,0.0,0.0,0.17051392280867553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434748817432982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19102007429210185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852563149596543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323269091579786,0.10029387960351957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133884712249834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05792824340640108,0.0,0.1260270104163327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946730246667467,0.11379097910633257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431798630069471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919073240297493,0.0,0.0,0.12516574503621009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06093466527708492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05416851556517132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139005558247952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150677182921667,0.08221330470575335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584204050808858,0.12170878292819247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3726201907763445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103013918558675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256011317489426,0.09468767740532988,0.10546866597589682,0.17634642465586228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17071584654745134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638417329578084,0.0,0.10449951562944176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969106944866727,0.0,0.12679660893537192,0.1287358254335904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4401166281903413,0.06465280961373407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307953225609884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993820567279264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260017317475987,0.0,0.07876327829250956,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KurlyKyle,2020/02/17,"How do your pets benefit your mental health? I have two dogs (Saxon and Max) , two chameleons(Brick and Ghost) and two crested geckos (Walter and Jesse).

On my YouTube channel Smile with Kyle I talk about how my pets improve my mental health.",6.54829457364341,8.115704139534888,4.81860465116279,86.0448062015504,65.74418604651163,6.663565891472868,28.286821705426355,6.42735559955562,1.2717658914728691,190,6,33,1,3,54,30,43,0.0,0.8190000000000001,0.18100000000000002,0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,0,7,2,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,7,1,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5036607535253789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4775107306571333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904239156166133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6942968240074092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sparklingoat,2020/02/17,"My mental health is deteriorating and I just am stuck I've been exceptionally tired lately (and I bet it's cos I've been multitasking too many things: my school organization, my academics (taxation is taxing my life) and my social life). But see I can't drop anything. My organization relies on me. It's my last 6 months in university. And I can't live without having social time. 

And my mental health is deteriorating. As I write my thesis, do tax homework, and live my daily life, I've been thinking of killing myself instead. Cos if I drop my responsibilities, I feel like I disappoint people. If I kill myself, at least they aren't angry at me. It doesn't help that I watched the politician's first episode. The trigger warning was there, but it was all so sudden. 

I haven't been diagnosed with anything so I refuse to say I'm depressed, but I feel that way. I just.

​

I wish I didn't feel this way. I am so tired.",2.3813346903169514,4.8726358453038685,4.228025588833965,81.71717068915385,80.04972375690608,6.241465542308811,23.89095667345159,7.475848149327749,1.1733801104972374,732,26,143,11,19,247,100,181,0.156,0.7859999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9509,0,0,0,0,0,2,32.0,0,0,1,1,8,5,2,0,2,0,19,8,0,3,1,28,27,15,2,3,9,0,3,1,0,0,8,1,1,0,8,7,0,1,4,0,3,0,7,4,0,1,8,6,33,1,10,19,2,14,0,2,2,0,7,4,0,3,7,94,41,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518344645634046,0.16281850169765827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22053281415974724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154096335127767,0.1360020294293438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20325558221289974,0.0957260019855423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397601569676195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28486068113674257,0.0,0.0,0.08981397447887446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29649106547874204,0.0,0.0,0.10922374884318284,0.15115211305883616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839337370340713,0.06546315255158269,0.0,0.23663994930974586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584982373899848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700707391493043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069534716338398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928952102291846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10655814340420522,0.0,0.1356100188697423,0.10677660772710686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731819055778533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902027490597328,0.08585853817250637,0.0,0.0,0.07813351897266302,0.3080149122241744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212717870789398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15408755217381173,0.12916632714874487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16281850169765827,0.0
mentalhealth,po_litos,2020/02/17,"Writing my thesis makes me suicidal Hi everyone, english is not my first language, so please excuse me for my grammar/orthography mistakes. 

I've been working on my thesis for about a year and a half, I feel like the more I investigate the less I know about the subject, it's like this ever expanding theoretical sea and I'm drowning in it.
Most of the times I try to work on it I get intrusive thoughts about self-harm and suicide, which thankfully I haven't acted upon, but it's hard because I get anxious, and start crying, and my coping mechanism is to procrastinate, FOR WEEKS. My ideal deadline (haha) was on March, 1st, and when that date was announced I felt like I could be able to finish in time, but my thesis teacher was been «unreachable» (he answers my texts but doesn't help at all, he doesn't read the documents I sent him, and when we talk about the subject he keeps expanding it to other areas that have nothing to do with my core theme) and me, being a pretty insecure person, feel unable to go on writing without approval. 
The next date for submitting is in July, but I haven't written anything in about a year (I've only read, translated some texts, and made an outline), so I don't trust myself to actually finish on time. I feel like I wasted the last year, because I have nothing to show from it.

Of course a solution could be going to therapy but I can't afford it, so I don't know what to do. Has any of you felt like this? Or faced a situation like this?",6.438219178082187,5.976560321917808,7.247363013698635,75.60782534246576,65.64383561643837,10.03972602739726,34.003424657534254,9.516144504307137,3.0588657534246577,1162,46,222,20,16,389,154,292,0.114,0.774,0.11199999999999999,-0.364,1,0,0,0,0,1,39.0,1,1,0,5,11,12,0,1,15,1,25,1,1,2,2,41,45,20,3,4,8,0,6,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,15,11,0,1,9,3,0,4,9,2,0,2,11,6,33,10,36,29,5,35,0,0,0,0,14,12,0,3,25,153,48,6,0.1188954964217212,0.0,0.11602485362605006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085301466706796,0.0,0.0,0.1343180686989808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784086300223856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495518214116265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189856758556298,0.0,0.13060111991685422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075477834090777,0.0,0.11360974198551795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18035140620231915,0.16987793280024222,0.2283166437370378,0.0,0.0,0.10113244851852354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12423597929940534,0.0,0.1351421011285088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650701133837744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969314504197753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567978013769916,0.0,0.0,0.1306837108950485,0.09691569835422097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34851800344892786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250179348706912,0.07936366710015917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12644670928449894,0.0,0.0,0.2281668708918249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042538266497913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038149614623638,0.0,0.13051155142356613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209594635634214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378553424631952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124033932912123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364351950403586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415484431905594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601047511308401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556369634242018,0.0,0.10946299899139758,0.13596736200349713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438974340302084,0.20798676028728075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072223756499064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537079556371597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11461101575485523,0.0,0.17311467486708215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22969440466084945
mentalhealth,GE1SER,2020/02/17,"Am I the only one who is constantly thinking 24/7? I feel like the voice inside my head never gets a rest, constantly analyzing things that have happened, currently happening, or will happen in the future. 

I think this is having quite a severe effect on my mental health and my coping mechanism from stress is to hide away in my room. 

If anyone can relate or has any advice it would be greatly appreciated.",6.48,7.706065000000002,7.251999999999999,69.78600000000003,65.66666666666666,9.733333333333334,28.333333333333336,9.888512548439397,2.9011333333333336,325,10,52,7,5,108,62,75,0.094,0.828,0.078,-0.0772,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,1,5,0,11,2,1,1,1,10,18,4,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,1,0,5,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,7,2,6,15,1,10,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,3,6,41,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18424291781542207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821631804466568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183427935977066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17714320136301484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40749795080804185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533346139558692,0.1346958004619574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850640634758603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20787031633930989,0.0,0.0,0.5001862466187741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19350043722022234,0.20041334992579646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211302624996708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19000790608889206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541667972191752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277622267912059,0.1433961327332658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20053964691402185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130009411073739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21597640143538813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526018988669912,0.2416226372304972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13393617759679233,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,okoktadok,2020/02/17,"Can written notes help the psychiatrist correctly diagnose me through the assessment? I’ve been told by the previous psychiatrist that I’m showing traits of OCD and also have generalised anxiety disorder. However, there’s a lot more than this to my current mental state. I don’t want to be diagnosed incorrectly, how can I help the psychiatrist understand my situation better other than written notes?",8.365882352941178,10.731168529411768,8.97576470588236,54.93394117647063,62.235294117647065,14.263529411764706,43.01176470588235,13.023866798666859,7.318037647058822,332,20,45,15,5,111,53,68,0.063,0.7929999999999999,0.14400000000000002,0.6767,2,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,0,6,2,0,1,1,6,12,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,5,1,7,7,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,32,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20939980326686827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003130532922361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23158333495533756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5315405489678529,0.0,0.0,0.3001005683573218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3510224773836008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226138613953192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26388126256261923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943281964707247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502070477056845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725930706098183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15444477319993047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BucksNewUni,2020/02/17,"An exploration of the differences in perceptions of depression, mental health and emotion between South Asian cultures. I am currently conducting research as part of my dissertation and would really appreciate it if anyone could fill out my survey, I am focusing on depression within people from the south east, specifically those with an Indian, Pakistani or Bangladeshi heritage. If you identify with any of these three then please click on the link attached. It should take around 20 mins, including reading time. 

Thank You 

[Survey ](https://buckspsychology.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_eEueODnoZQ8pusJ)",12.446000000000005,15.153876266666668,9.533333333333337,53.430000000000035,53.0,13.555555555555555,41.66666666666667,12.745084868956482,6.6030000000000015,504,24,59,17,6,147,72,90,0.077,0.8220000000000001,0.10099999999999999,0.0754,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,5,0,5,1,0,0,0,15,7,7,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,1,6,1,15,4,1,15,0,2,1,0,3,9,0,3,4,43,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680363181350841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277790569442747,0.0,0.0,0.2199711849634425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19728906097212104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4256533424887892,0.0,0.0,0.2581666688700977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27795398438766983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26265550235904744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24901845133793085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675849730013601,0.0,0.1713078689001889,0.0,0.0,0.2712413466043125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471666403587685,0.0,0.1582984410710714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857882763357408,0.0,0.0,0.2274962708351652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14408586397357964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755325881422631,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yogata,2020/02/17,"It was always hard to spot stress for kids, I think this makes a sense... So I had some stressful days lately and I wasn't ready to focus on my mental health or what's going on around me... I found out that somehow, my kids are just starting to behave a little bit stranger than usual.

While making some little researches and reading many articles about it, I've found [this one](https://www.nearestdocs.com/psychological-health-something-that-should-really-matter-to-you/). I won't lie that it really helped me a bit to know what's going on, but is there something missing I need to know?",8.005718654434247,7.977967935779817,7.300504587155968,75.07840214067282,62.30275229357797,9.468501529051991,29.175840978593268,8.841846274778883,2.1354941896024457,471,12,84,6,6,146,72,109,0.107,0.893,0.0,-0.7742,0,0,2,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,2,3,0,6,1,0,2,0,18,18,6,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,9,4,0,0,5,1,0,2,2,3,0,0,5,1,10,0,13,12,4,14,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,4,5,52,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281346338590133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14209225688639493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34851909613131765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293924304013413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500218451059729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814271274461428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429847616592906,0.0,0.0,0.3393291091288105,0.0,0.0,0.106987373004997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17544177627625476,0.0,0.18005402382145913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199547263030459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21309010331105996,0.16182577209569973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16085558552972282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118353388383529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816006671567707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15965939248562067,0.0,0.10225422369354734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12288034742045532,0.0,0.0,0.11297716653794737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656796312174381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227561470722288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17579469177362553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sam_21000,2020/02/17,"Do I have social anxiety? So I'm (m19) i alway have that random feeling when I'm out that people are alway look at me or talking about me, or mock me or judge... I feel like opinion doesn't matter or I'm uncomfortable when people look at me is that normal?",0.4272222222222233,2.5800602407407425,3.216296296296296,88.03333333333335,85.48148148148148,5.0814814814814815,18.259259259259263,6.42735559955562,0.0646148148148149,199,5,41,2,6,70,33,54,0.159,0.7659999999999999,0.075,-0.5475,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,11,13,7,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,7,1,4,13,0,5,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,6,3,27,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4704188799723941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21624670027754272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28585939964041257,0.20194410278657066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810142838313044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4747540257239965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769628899750449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3919444977078612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881530288279318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22720461214384186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Waytooarch,2020/02/17,"My mother is suicidal and abusive Yesterday my family had an episode. My brother punched me in the head over chocolates, my mom started beating the two of us with a small plank in return. The worst part is that my final senior year examinations are going. They would determine my future. Today she forced me to discuss it and instead of listening to me, had a screaming competition with me and ended up hitting me, cutting off her hair and then attempting to burn the left over hair on her head. She also said terrible things to me in the process. I want to end it all at this point. I have an exam in 2 days and I cannot even study with all of this on my mind. I cannot confide in my school counselor because he is also her colleague since she is a teacher. I feel helpless, truly helpless. What is worse is that nobody in my house other than myself believes that therapy is important.",4.960038759689926,6.132963686046512,5.779069767441863,79.1587596899225,69.11627906976744,8.291472868217053,32.35658914728682,8.59863814320734,2.6631612403100764,702,31,128,11,12,230,107,172,0.187,0.7809999999999999,0.032,-0.9836,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,1,2,4,6,1,0,10,0,14,4,4,0,2,15,21,8,1,2,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,10,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,3,6,29,0,25,16,4,29,0,2,0,0,15,16,0,0,12,103,39,3,0.0,0.19996517541156086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699310519110945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028807916563542,0.0,0.0,0.1901463032597359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108842863756146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989607355556389,0.0,0.0,0.11147117328607446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910159275791547,0.0,0.08533532076308506,0.0,0.0,0.1848795841148753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591603518295952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34641397965120463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19473823495223752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18336939490313744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040986424398247,0.1976617034057813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18276175859118576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15954245890002194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605391771656738,0.0,0.0,0.17080452600041354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13960851344861494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11945646754222725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18460728560818315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930035150964584,0.0,0.11212346983261036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15997448455460514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16486403296781574,0.0,0.20300985770046184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995450794165666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17199132614095128,0.11988955933926555,0.0,0.0,0.10868252214918077
mentalhealth,lostminty,2020/02/17,"Values based living Do you live according to your values? I'm hardly aware of what mine are. I know I've gone against them and it's led to suffering for me.  I'm not sure if values mean much. They feel like morals, and afaik morals are subjective. However... Being my life subjective is the only way to go about to it. So...do I just pick values I like the sound of and do things that are in their accordance? Is that what choosing a better me is about? I'm shit scared I'll pick bad values. I certainly have in the past.",0.4689360172537746,2.8050386542056067,2.1770093457943918,94.11441409058231,87.6915887850467,5.9091301222142345,16.641984184040258,7.321109707123232,0.13810050323508305,404,9,89,7,13,132,69,107,0.125,0.6729999999999999,0.20199999999999999,0.8062,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,3,1,3,9,1,1,4,0,10,2,1,3,2,15,18,4,0,1,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,3,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,4,0,0,1,3,13,5,12,16,1,7,2,1,0,0,5,2,1,1,3,53,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21223187789462608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22480387930717255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12852237449235554,0.1815881208559647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444578456303047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22769770891506064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13969212537934875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179536707847382,0.2483615864150395,0.0,0.4488958362754719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768793990352753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868534788508089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933173431669128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426460806245779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544811540214051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26091481583704895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23956411958627466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688676441401837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017583395729961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,o0ClassyLassie0o,2020/02/17,"Taking medication when it traumatizes you? How can I take my medication when the reason I'm taking it tramatizes me?

Like looking at it? Swallowing it? 

Can I crush it if its film coated?",1.9865714285714304,4.835811657142859,4.671428571428574,74.03857142857146,89.57142857142857,8.514285714285714,24.142857142857146,8.841846274778883,2.9474,148,6,25,5,5,52,25,35,0.136,0.795,0.069,-0.3527,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,2,0,3,7,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,1,7,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,3,19,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632075734572994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25150488814696026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6034302477322618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30793627241313914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6755610375547418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coopsawesome,2020/02/17,"Hey so can I just ask here for some help I am so incredibly unmotivated and mentally and physically exhausted constantly

How can I be happier, what should I focus on to just not be unmotivated. And does anyone have some tips for how to create and maintain an engaging conversation 

Please I need some help",6.3444642857142854,8.02016166071429,8.20214285714286,61.19285714285715,66.32142857142857,12.742857142857144,33.64285714285714,12.161744961471696,5.016335714285713,247,11,42,10,4,87,38,56,0.128,0.636,0.23600000000000002,0.7317,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,2,0,14,9,8,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,5,6,3,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,3,1,34,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24934244262954505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33337210213898305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3853570365554586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120623512916366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4780418360077547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3593681070902619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644137784276585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3914388221840083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kansasrules,2020/02/17,"The things i save in my notepad are helping me heal. Everything i touch turns to shit, and everyone can see straight through me.
Spiraling into submission-
I wish today i didn't exist.
And i wish last night never happened..
Turn my back to the music yet again, because it surely is easier to live life with my eyes closed. 
Numb your thoughts babe because-
Ignorance is bliss and routine is overrated.
Thoughts pile, fester, then get retracted back from where they surfaced. Further to be swallowed, further to swell.
In the end i let them all down, contradicting my actions becoming a burden for each and every shoulder i cry onto.
Creating a false reality to shelter me from pain
I create my own obstacles, then trip along the way
I jump to conclusions all while breaking myself down into bits n pieces
I've disconnected from my former self feel shunned from society. Completely unrelatable 

Just sort of ready for clarity.
For peace of mind
Normal thought processes
Healthy coping mechanisms 
An escape
From what I've come to know as my life.
Im clawing at the walls, gasping for air, stretching for clarity
They make it look so effortless, with style n grace
While time sneaks away from me, i start the cycle once again.
The right path for what i need, for myself to function 
It's a long fucking road to picking up my pieces, once again
And every fiber of my being hopes i give up
Because all ive ever known is utter defeat, all while keeping a smile on my face
Pushing down my guilts and failures
Glossing over my problems for temporary fixes..
All the while I've become what i fear",6.294283276450511,7.645562276450512,6.071622866894199,77.62531825938565,66.16723549488054,9.136450511945393,33.76262798634812,9.3871,3.2054015017064854,1269,56,218,24,20,396,186,293,0.115,0.73,0.155,0.8752,1,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,3,2,11,14,2,2,13,0,11,11,4,2,8,44,32,14,0,6,1,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,7,14,1,2,8,0,0,5,2,10,0,0,4,5,36,4,46,25,10,54,0,1,3,1,8,25,2,2,22,144,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124332201629983,0.18403656659965467,0.0,0.21884783214659714,0.26433061761495674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306478507770279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308448144663987,0.12547095471858638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13145107587754193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599145512644187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824770757225097,0.20165304563316136,0.11434911755484126,0.10755102520847447,0.0,0.0,0.13466120085531266,0.0605083795004093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063231348893804,0.06252225536811548,0.1147976699288624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582314187218184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021179039277929,0.0,0.0,0.11885858867738396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926334893479552,0.0,0.0,0.10636754728019678,0.0,0.0,0.06576710218013553,0.09754642859262032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236993829520808,0.16905189147948174,0.0,0.0,0.10567015947532712,0.10590353980393552,0.10049204886734643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988016819874667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083185068132565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873324874376927,0.09229631981778194,0.0,0.0,0.1123015050008251,0.11725047820866495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25488773784910684,0.0,0.0,0.12733654254625182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450733146043725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219690428754832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536091602174072,0.0,0.12484114942506955,0.0,0.12283878784768795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470252654104042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278687247931245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950294676186566,0.0,0.0,0.2850121039551129,0.06978011476331705,0.0,0.11343247714139686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603316077257651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498789783860884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752275135092567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jpizaa,2020/02/17,"I am tired and confused about my truth. I don't know how long it has been since I've started feeling like a complete loser in life. it feels like it's all pointless and my existence doesn't make a damn difference in this world. People who mean so much to me can just carry on without me. In-fact, I feel like I am a burden to society and to my parents. I just can't take any more redundant pointless living. 

I guess the point of this post is to get a better perspective on this. I don't know if I am actually depressed or just being a victim and keeping my ego trapped to compensate for my shortcomings

 I appreciate any insights as to what to do as I don't have access to professional psychological help because right now I just want to punch myself to death.",5.59854256854257,5.531303038961042,6.637878787878788,77.94904040404042,67.31168831168831,9.701587301587304,32.69552669552669,9.444778638647367,2.8201336219336217,604,24,121,11,9,203,97,154,0.152,0.703,0.145,-0.6177,1,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,8,11,2,1,6,0,15,2,0,2,2,26,28,10,1,2,7,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,7,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,1,3,19,5,20,26,3,11,0,2,0,0,3,7,1,4,6,84,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.17064760856146755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378347943000137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659895017280822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465804501332567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18334756052628187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15061502221286427,0.0,0.0,0.1827016244681084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652581339884026,0.3747808603985816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136220431298836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926386970062302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172114783612386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543223016616692,0.0,0.0,0.19220763521972853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235156454122577,0.2562975171718885,0.0,0.15441315485068527,0.15475418767394816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672688716299175,0.0,0.0,0.19048437549758024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854935525164166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19417211494764386,0.0,0.0,0.12123263653365975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16530839579402032,0.0,0.16747684064619367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14933777412059693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446540285043537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237736785102497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148025669707672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009870035736729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031426837783225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856815709850215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,step_away,2020/02/17,"Am I depressed? Where do I begin? ""When did it start?"" I keep asking myself. Did it start? Am I broken?

I am 27 years old, I'll be 28 in a few months and I feel like I'm treading through life without a goal or purpose. I don't find any happiness in anything, I feel like I'm pushing away everyone I love and I feel like I'm digging my own hole. I keep digging and digging until I can't see the people I love anymore and then I blame them for leaving me. I'm wondering how long I've been digging. This is kinda how I picture my whole situation in my mind.

I wish I knew where to begin my story as I have no clue when I got this ... sad? Bitter? I don't know.

Did I have a good childhood? I can't say. Other people have definitely had it worse. My parents are far from perfect and I realize that, but I can't really blame them for my own unhappiness. They were always supportive, though they put pressure on me to succeed at school in order to have it better than them. Was it too much pressure? I don't know. I sometimes acted out as a kid and I was definitely not the most well-behaved child if I think back to my childhood and my mother has always had a bad temper, so when shouting didn't help, I got a spanking or sometimes she took a wooden spoon and hit my fingers with them. My parents argued a lot in the past and there was lots of screaming and verbal violence between them. Now that I'm writing this, I'm kind of wondering if my parents have mental issues as well..

At the age of 13 I moved to a different country, went to a new school, made new friends, started playing guitar, got into a band and put this idea into my mind that I want to do something with music. I rehearsed a lot with my band, (should've rehearsed more myself), we played some gigs and felt like we were going places, though looking back at it, we sucked. We worked hard for a few years though, some harder than others and I was definitely part of them, but at some point, the conflicts amongst the band members just became too many and we split up.

I had finished school and started my studies at university, when I was still part of the band. I didn't really know what to study, but I'd always loved English and biology, so I figured ""hey, why not become a teacher?"". I quit biology after a semester and replaced it with another language. Meanwhile, I still had this idea in my head of someday being able to live a happy life by making music. My studies were kind of always my Plan B. At some point, 3 years into my studies, the band broke up and I started focusing on my studies. I performed really well and finishing my studies wasn't that much of a problem, even though it was stressful at times. 

I met my (now) ex-girlfriend right around when things with the band were going further and further downhill. We got together, were together for a while, I did a semester abroad to improve my language skills, I returned, we moved together. I was focusing on my studies and on my girlfriend and friends. I did my practical training and passed, I got a job as a teacher at my old school and my girlfriend and I moved to a new beautiful apartment closer to our families.

Never could I have imagined how stressful this job could be, especially in the beginning (where I am right now). My procrastination didn't really help and I was permanently stressed out. My ex had to endure my frustrations with myself. All this time I was still having the idea of ""music is my Plan A"" in my head, even though I hadn't written anything in a few years. I think deep down I was telling myself that I didn't have time for making music because of my studies and my girlfriend, then my job and my girlfriend and I directed my own resentment at her.

At some point, she probably couldn't take it anymore and ended our relationship of 5 years. I saw it coming as she was starting to build new friendships, spending more time with working colleagues, smoking, going out, etc. Note: We had just lived in our new apartment (the one I mentioned above) for half a year, when it happened that we separated. This was a year ago. We had bought lots of furniture and I felt like I'd stay in this relationship forever. 

I've blamed her ever since because she ended it, but we still remained friends. I moved back to my parents' house. I started smoking weed, felt like I'd pick up playing music again, told myself that I was free from my ex and could focus on music, started a project with a friend of mine (who's depressed), wrote two songs, realized that they are shit and that I am shit because I hadn't practiced for so long. I got an expensive laptop, some gear and tried to get into recording my own music, but I haven't created anything in months. I started smoking cannabis a lot, almost every night. I tried out LSD a month and a half ago and did LSD two times since then. 

The first trip was just fun, during the second one I cried because of how stressed I feel due to my job and during the third one yesterday, it all hit me like a freight train. I came home and cried for hours. I realized what a shitty lifestyle I've been leading the past year and even before that, when I was still with my ex-girlfriend. I saw some photos of my own graduation, how happy and proud she looked and how indifferent I was towards my own fucking graduation - my ex-girlfriend was happier for me then I was!! I saw how fucking indifferent I was towards her. I realized that I was the one to blame. My mind wandered and reflected on the last 10 years or so , looking for when I had become who I am now. 

I realized that I had been living in fantasy land regarding my aspirations as a musician. I'm not good at it and even taking up the guitar feels like a burden. I realized that I can't become what I want to become. I realized that I am working a job that doesn't fulfill me. I'm getting some positive feedback from my students (of course not from all of them), but I still feel that I suck at this profession and that it stresses me out. I realized that if I quit my job, I wouldn't know what to do with myself and that my life would probably just get worse. I realized that my toxicity pushed away my supportive ex and that it was not her fault, but mine. I realized that I think that I hate myself and that I've done so the past few years. And I realized that I probably answered my own question. I think I'm depressed.",4.493421663656804,5.385528725832014,5.439362400029489,82.20179633656436,69.98256735340729,8.215250801606901,30.839236354254965,8.428315365350997,2.262691158368039,4980,204,983,74,86,1637,411,1262,0.12300000000000001,0.7659999999999999,0.111,-0.9533,13,0,1,0,1,1,158.0,14,0,10,16,59,64,12,7,57,0,93,13,5,12,6,196,186,98,0,13,23,8,11,8,8,2,3,4,1,2,60,81,0,3,40,13,4,19,26,29,2,11,74,23,203,36,125,101,36,177,0,5,7,5,77,67,6,25,97,714,263,25,0.03707031575281603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572119644001691,0.0,0.03712056643042912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338188938968744,0.0,0.0,0.0252090859072077,0.03887145828720106,0.0,0.0,0.07352758427160823,0.0,0.0,0.09151713380688772,0.03300044038334536,0.03465574110409626,0.0,0.06965756385988844,0.0855143537996497,0.030952165225477956,0.09039088163474222,0.1637650051287705,0.03154410834787822,0.0,0.0,0.03278568179610965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042398565576422534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03193279459097062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879289206873185,0.0,0.08144000233308568,0.0,0.0,0.09578582591470401,0.0,0.0,0.03873058994718065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037935803553856534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566659340868368,0.0,0.041343201159813166,0.09793837574504198,0.033532222914051606,0.031233339851355787,0.03542227531529695,0.0,0.0,0.034946594518140715,0.0,0.11246319289790924,0.10593216392324438,0.1067799495735434,0.0,0.03388159701267915,0.03153199164196574,0.0,0.0,0.11456173597492607,0.06854181914073705,0.058103129879962724,0.0,0.06320374418426135,0.062185644128487774,0.1778911076719112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03278115779361738,0.1183861213157794,0.03320772156245523,0.036599262114730614,0.07608967749748571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04969490248078659,0.0,0.03718454922887108,0.0,0.03650679377006195,0.042774167222883984,0.0,0.125543622811763,0.0,0.03869177847554385,0.2207194100466772,0.06589959983845066,0.0,0.07720605864535385,0.08149150426094905,0.03021725504767975,0.0,0.03925211185118646,0.0,0.0,0.07855158094708507,0.1448854702628021,0.0,0.09820130390821456,0.06561212581287107,0.09338918650430934,0.0,0.0,0.15757928403003976,0.1003722218660226,0.03507682908805152,0.04948944724144813,0.03758348175722655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037358159247521866,0.0,0.11229135405364284,0.0,0.08876751708736738,0.15759951597470584,0.05450189488703603,0.0,0.02859091282104743,0.1790137097691417,0.0,0.034787980121959466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779812096853478,0.0,0.10047922136568202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16464879466962262,0.08028707896880227,0.1061634329391676,0.0513997787099083,0.0,0.03873058994718065,0.0,0.10513029171410627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199042107388144,0.035471285719946934,0.0,0.07453181244298901,0.041527237583466464,0.07885768775696021,0.0,0.0,0.09499277404375622,0.0,0.0,0.07959929188027243,0.0,0.06331569420828162,0.0,0.029479802980165438,0.0,0.1500685545262138,0.02954024214503438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610429281102811,0.06132989652960485,0.04166858809150946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028538540158283388,0.0733269803301089,0.0,0.2361470426074013,0.03951202423004423,0.17762641227526724,0.0,0.2123196072366388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413391002635802,0.0,0.0,0.05574452797679884,0.0,0.03240108990826816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02462787058435828,0.09501264600263724,0.1821069850543415,0.0,0.1080799961352472,0.0,0.0,0.03542227531529695,0.04118648479518703,0.05033662207345551,0.0,0.07242462392589723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043730065379547205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999199748318877,0.03436455409446152,0.03345019404814755,0.041387683680722674,0.04262903363986978,0.03573446152841212,0.08040235224025989,0.08096289412013946,0.0,0.07555563751559101,0.026333688711481743,0.0,0.0,0.2387206794676988
mentalhealth,doodlefck,2020/02/17,"Wanting more food than I’m actually going to eat? First off, I don’t know where to post this. Anyway, I’m just going to get straight to it. I always had a huge appetite. When I was younger, I’d eat soooo much food. Junk food, fruits, veggies, literally anything. This went on until I got to high school when my appetite suddenly dropped by 500% and went from lots of food constantly to little portions periodically. You may think that’s a good thing, and it is, but my brain still thinks I have a huge appetite even after many years. This ends up to lots of wasted food. I guess the phrase “Your eyes are bigger than your stomach” applies really well here. I get uncomfortable when there’s not a lot of food or drinks readily available, and I always get way more food than I’m actually going to eat. If I go to a friend’s house for the night or if I stay somewhere other than home, my first thought is “Will there be food there?”. I worry so much about having access to food and drinks without really needing to eat or drink much. My bf thinks it’s a funny quirk I have- that I’ll get 10 times more food than I need or want to eat (it just makes me feel comfortable to have the option), but it makes me sad to waste so much. Getting small portions that actually suit the amount I will eat makes me uncomfortable and I have absolutely no clue why. I always have to get big portions of food I want or I’ll get anxious. What does this mean? Any advice will help, thanks! :)

TL;DR Not having a lot of food readily accessible makes me anxious and I buy/order/cook way more food than I would actually eat",2.9878511530398337,4.818180405660382,3.9945283018867954,87.40131027253668,75.13207547169812,6.849475890985326,23.412997903563948,7.662118739084242,0.9538985324947596,1251,37,261,17,27,404,159,318,0.096,0.7979999999999999,0.106,-0.2919,0,0,3,0,0,0,40.0,0,3,0,2,17,6,0,0,11,0,19,27,3,4,0,44,54,21,0,8,14,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,15,6,24,0,7,3,0,6,5,1,1,2,6,3,30,5,36,42,16,38,0,1,1,0,6,12,0,14,15,159,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.1887430090614066,0.0,0.0,0.04725019152499698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070121816574697,0.0,0.0,0.03288183695782348,0.0,0.0,0.10925071510657088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03979056709635263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053978167251611836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05225263594938595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04231421484165527,0.0,0.0,0.1421031955758462,0.0,0.34634179500872475,0.0,0.0,0.0428265869295693,0.0,0.0,0.03193683534397571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02444883289459789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225842158204735,0.7600955238624094,0.0,0.03735756561938339,0.0,0.17683787442608073,0.0,0.10992096098688277,0.0405563735804782,0.0386724745477712,0.0,0.05326650581441904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03241013353326225,0.05108781501211692,0.04850220629159386,0.0,0.0,0.05579310562099389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02657365648262323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04846261345063475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16443266033457712,0.0,0.0,0.1291045570883497,0.04902255972300512,0.0,0.05267081460102322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421806747110615,0.07170657646571177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04537620660554048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04630900356314439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061952601529773964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04893602410447119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051538082078351526,0.03861493133426497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044517133969224416,0.0,0.0,0.03212372031870095,0.09294834250307517,0.0,0.03838704302924513,0.02819514221501605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555991787592575,0.0767610456746598,0.0,0.0,0.04347533756191236,0.08964780944630059,0.04363124593043114,0.0,0.0,0.0466107633604004,0.0,0.0,0.049105025985187484,0.0,0.034348728942267745,0.0,0.0,0.031137878182538083
mentalhealth,wow32422,2020/02/17,"I dont really know what to do Recently I've noticed a trend that's been happening, whenever people walk past the door of my room or even stomping upstairs it sends me into a panick, and I dont know why, maybe it has something to do with my childhood as I can barely remember my childhood and I don't necessarily want to as the few snippets I have of it weren't very good. I don't really know what to do as my parents arent bad people but this isnt normal, I can explain further just dont know what info us relevant",3.982597402597402,4.232177363636364,6.093116883116879,79.3668181818182,70.81818181818181,9.194805194805195,30.259740259740266,9.23628265651192,2.519428571428572,410,16,85,8,7,145,67,110,0.031,0.948,0.021,0.0007,2,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,16,0,0,0,0,16,23,7,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,8,4,0,0,7,0,0,2,8,1,0,0,2,0,13,1,11,21,1,9,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,4,59,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127913085882207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5949210986758363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175832532383534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419211497865914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962744764026928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37196263364761417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16998919354117822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16578500201925475,0.0,0.19264104610349075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18788215976510692,0.0,0.16152534537700594,0.23461092332546174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21679414763079985,0.0,0.16706955231330084,0.0,0.19167631241599176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302622973278474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035328152742072,0.0,0.0,0.13961186885953922,0.0998015095909416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268121980336372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,datboi5725,2020/02/17,"My friend needs help My long distance girlfriend is depressed, and i tried to make her contact a psychiatrist, but she will not listen. Can anybody give me advice?
Thanks in advance.",5.392708333333331,8.252208687500001,4.42625,82.32708333333336,71.5,5.5166666666666675,32.541666666666664,6.42735559955562,2.0000291666666667,146,7,23,1,3,43,31,32,0.06,0.723,0.217,0.6858,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,8,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,2,2,7,0,3,0,1,0,0,8,1,0,0,1,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3761125043709964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315073532681258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973669970179241,0.0,0.0,0.3692239655884106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579853350169981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34061775783855097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256918737919394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28539291782681225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35435730955135464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26131674801586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,annaboo3,2020/02/17,"Feel guilty for being so obsessive I always feel so guilty and like I’m doing something wrong, because when I “like” someone (not just romantically, also just platonically etc) I tend to get very obsessive and my day often revolves around seeing that person. I am quiet so I usually don’t “embarrass myself” / at least to me, I think I do a good job at hiding this “obsessive” behavior. But At this point it honestly feels slightly wrong/ I feel like I’m almost invading these people’s privacy; constantly checking social media (even teachers), constantly thinking about them, constantly trying to impress them, even dreaming about these people frequently. Then I get so upset if I feel “rejected” or let down by these people (because I am literally obsessed with gaining their validation/affection). Anyone understand why this could be happening/ had situations similar?",10.218112244897961,10.628293353741501,10.199379251700684,54.66600765306126,57.639455782312915,13.608503401360545,42.86479591836735,12.815532586354998,6.354646938775513,701,36,92,23,8,232,102,147,0.179,0.6809999999999999,0.139,-0.6718,1,1,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,3,1,14,15,0,6,1,0,10,0,0,0,0,21,25,12,0,2,6,0,5,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,8,4,0,0,8,1,1,0,2,9,0,0,1,7,17,6,13,20,2,14,0,1,1,0,5,6,0,4,11,69,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13599177487367706,0.0,0.0,0.10860535321495073,0.11300286969501215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495988805326494,0.0,0.0,0.12089762875130305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16557420330510494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4402795689245596,0.0,0.10843138229247913,0.0,0.0,0.08758471898265617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15146146315465744,0.1793993845807187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3433422197101825,0.09702103425018213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190781585370624,0.0,0.0,0.11390903924574275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009428355903898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476816765702365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887255479975502,0.0,0.19904631868333705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824558381123494,0.11858202846823172,0.0,0.0,0.1283821552129214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822113846324144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265352326087947,0.0,0.13843882784116454,0.11506940717114818,0.10455138759001424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17404015627777752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220450056633996,0.0,0.0,0.14138058515650714,0.0,0.0,0.1495729735610419,0.11205555953433552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254530832664093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969687588658341,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IsThereLifeAnywhere,2020/02/17,"My mental health is almost gone. I've been having weird dreams and hallucinations in the middle of the day and at night I've been hearing my name being called out from somewhere within my house. I don't know what's going on. This just started happening to me a month ago, and I have no idea why.",3.0174999999999983,4.763005750000001,4.036666666666669,87.495,74.83333333333334,6.133333333333334,20.333333333333336,6.742157984588678,0.2412333333333332,235,5,48,2,5,76,50,60,0.069,0.883,0.048,-0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,7,1,0,0,0,9,13,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,3,1,6,0,8,9,0,13,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,5,31,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24118168510542745,0.0,0.27244789348684456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778231574864156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17546849587504554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15462880930401385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405986288940276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892073354485296,0.30665289344795416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31394272437544946,0.0,0.30714415991717753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952754502400198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27419171554424354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171709231667844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25532778225928904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925789708100842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24550904745013166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GypsyAngelRow,2020/02/17,"Shaking Hands Hey guys so here's the deal. I've had unsteady hands for about a year now, and since then it's been manageable. But, now it's affecting my art. Anyone on here know what might be causing it?/Have experience? I got a lot more to work through with my shrink but I'd appreciate the help.",2.096,4.3678819333333365,2.8633333333333333,92.345,79.66666666666666,6.666666666666668,25.0,7.793537801064563,1.1984999999999997,236,9,52,4,6,74,48,60,0.023,0.848,0.129,0.797,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,1,4,0,4,2,2,2,0,9,6,5,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,2,3,0,6,1,2,6,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,4,31,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279105058174928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3348385081945999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33603820180741445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188398081979663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606904893698441,0.0,0.0,0.3227398866159393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184761557187468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791325637629887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771094376056469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34577944865724003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26962765506174485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23729411509320414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20989990416354856
mentalhealth,shorttoground,2020/02/17,Deep rooted self esteem issues (30M) Learned that I may have some deep rooted self esteem issues that I’ve been projecting on my past girlfriends. Was taking corticosteroids which exacerbated those issues times 100. I guess I’m learning to cope with this ugly side of myself. Afraid I shouldn’t get into another relationship until I funny understand why I’m this why. I ruined a pretty good relationship so now I’m alone and in the healing process.,5.4498257839721225,7.917665585365857,6.102961672473867,72.1718292682927,69.97560975609754,8.10034843205575,26.34843205574913,8.841846274778883,2.360457839721255,366,12,57,7,7,119,62,82,0.11199999999999999,0.778,0.109,-0.0615,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,5,1,0,2,0,12,12,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,6,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,7,1,7,8,1,10,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,3,4,31,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18808209622418454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904226887541351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487813341969258,0.0,0.0,0.15231686793640856,0.0,0.0,0.2000520908376823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5686274311261207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733570700150618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847517633307644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3899393501209982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3788953281253503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654006523556744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589200596771453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18905126459365432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3277302252430866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Scompare,2020/02/17,How does mental healthcare get covered? I live in Canada and I recently ended up in the hospital for a few suicide attempts and I chose to opt out of staying in the psych ward. Apparently since my dad's work benefits include mental healthcare I don't apply for any government programs. The problem is that the benefits are only a few hundred dollars a year and I'm one of several people in my family with mental health problems so the coverage doesn't even come close to enough. Is there any way for me to get into the government programs? If I get myself back in the hospital and stay in the psych ward will my parents have to pay for it? Just trying to find the best option for them financially cause idk how this works at all. I don't want them to have to choose between me getting therapy or them being able to fix the roof or something.,3.702493506493507,5.7070605696969725,4.9543073593073625,80.5343181818182,73.6060606060606,7.865800865800867,29.361471861471863,8.634040054169528,2.4818744588744583,674,29,122,13,14,223,102,165,0.087,0.856,0.057,-0.47,2,0,1,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,3,4,7,5,0,0,13,0,10,1,0,3,1,23,17,10,1,4,4,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,9,0,0,2,0,2,1,3,2,0,1,0,0,15,3,27,15,5,19,0,0,0,0,5,11,0,4,4,88,18,9,0.14509668433121511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973414418450827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157039396688584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15227001845156726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905426352934156,0.0,0.12498794581288745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12697508624754733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851259533987425,0.1499236617027173,0.0,0.09583499156134644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678424071325712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261574083065902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032281156730501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423099041723418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812303055895005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4386699921044921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832126843453676,0.1103525667408948,0.0,0.0,0.16111269691490618,0.0,0.0,0.10059177153892107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776758623394517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14326547118264962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16391795316507876,0.0,0.12002547666654508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170251638079433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093075195378416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871222251352635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165930703834172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851112426439244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558178374401297,0.11517099432738252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126422857258914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343750752764128
mentalhealth,-kittie,2020/02/17,"I want to cheer up my self deprecating online friend. I have an online friend who I became friends with only recently. I will refer to him as Spot. Spot has shared that they have depression and anxiety and randomly share their negative thoughts and experiences. They are also very very self deprecating. Usually when Spot insults themself I compliment them and try to reassure them.

Recently another friend, who I will call Leaf, said that complimenting Spot only reminded them that (in Spot’s mind) Spot is the worst and doesn’t deserve those compliments. Leaf said Spot wants attention but this attention was only making Spot’s depression worse.

I trust Leaf, they are very smart and informed about psychology. I want to cheer up Spot but I am not sure how to comfort them. I would appreciate any advice or insight.

Thank you for your help!",5.386730584851391,8.253402442953025,5.429170661553215,75.09424496644296,71.5503355704698,9.894726749760308,30.10594439117929,10.125756701596842,3.698042761265581,680,29,112,21,14,213,92,149,0.122,0.596,0.281,0.9744,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,8,0,4,21,1,0,2,0,12,0,0,2,1,26,20,13,0,4,4,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,0,2,7,7,0,0,6,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,2,22,17,12,13,1,7,0,2,0,0,28,3,0,2,4,70,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13539068518711436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079939047562797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421960614859083,0.1452830738775143,0.1059913326700026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414763247519234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386679899334899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355297156268985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.428177431065448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286798729170924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248404017433083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989727343771166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161234238059948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736053034439281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635879473884925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28907835672331306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058292040098035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755938285395646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999422204007822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406720902274812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525946356381746,0.3429578928186938,0.24516336403941294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119556804297467,0.09842283801833528,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThankgodImAthiest,2020/02/17,"Apathetic/Empathetic thoughts at war constantly. I don’t even know if this is the right place but I’m really in need of some sort of help.

I’ve got this, thing, where I will think something super narcissistic/apathetic, and then instantly go back on it with the opposite. 

The best I can explain it is with a very recent and extreme example. My Grandma (who I LOVED) just died of cancer. Me and my mother watched her choke on her own blood and die. I cried *that* night. Since then? Not a thing. No longing, sadness, nothing. Just chillin’.

This is the bad part; when I hear my mother crying, or my sisters, or anyone, I tell myself they need to get over it and move on. It’s over and there is nothing more to be sad about. But *then*, I feel like a monster for thinking that. “How could you even think that’s ok?” I ask myself immediately after. 

Her funeral is Wednesday. I don’t want to go. I don’t want to have to see everyone crying over her passing, and find it rather annoying I have to. Once again, I think “Let’s just move on. We’re wasting time mourning.” But, after I think that, the empathy comes back in. 

Does that make sense? Like, I’m aware those “bad” thoughts are not ok, yet I support them. And it makes me feel awful. I feel like a terrible person. 

I’ll probably regret posting on main, but I don’t care. I gotta know whats going on, and if it’s normal or not.",0.8709408844765356,3.2180030288808688,2.6956847924187737,91.15359939079426,85.49819494584838,5.772969314079423,21.652639891696744,7.1686216300943375,0.7077040613718409,1057,36,226,16,32,350,154,277,0.252,0.625,0.12300000000000001,-0.9941,0,0,1,0,0,0,54.0,0,1,2,2,15,19,2,0,9,3,17,3,1,3,0,54,51,23,5,10,16,3,3,3,0,2,1,1,0,1,20,12,0,0,14,1,0,7,8,9,0,0,3,6,33,10,27,43,6,39,0,4,2,1,18,15,0,7,19,151,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737790795442655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864300109586166,0.0,0.0,0.16227022761266136,0.17620252062047098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073229050375843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758035947557597,0.0,0.0,0.09089249259940717,0.0,0.11402506189132333,0.0,0.08424575621618399,0.0,0.3477123551589552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21901742033229746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233756113042932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938434149952686,0.0,0.0,0.10082483973576736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16005583067680093,0.15076097392608465,0.0,0.0,0.09643950193453547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05512763467007687,0.0,0.17990113061220125,0.0,0.08439060008516291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892394111441905,0.0,0.0707249962588674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597741511241358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789702343940598,0.0,0.1546490258170247,0.0,0.0,0.09337813580468853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523210177292338,0.0,0.1408651912480595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22429312909950508,0.0,0.15647721250728175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901940203747807,0.10338305119548537,0.20249045362335424,0.0,0.0,0.11237085107772417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426329615797755,0.0,0.0,0.09213230017679258,0.1102415214589519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105494012833824,0.0,0.11376384609003284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675961039611819,0.0,0.10418409307017268,0.0,0.0,0.09010989080297778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408240728518779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728373507302978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123119455596049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197380450471481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222543352133447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401999777032294,0.33805122344689464,0.0,0.1675354698459382,0.061527093852566675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870615605151471,0.12447186958719827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TraditionalDingo8,2020/02/17,"How Often Do You Have Memories of the Past? This is a weird question, but I've been questioning what's normal recently and would really appreciate for someone to give me a reference.

I've had dissociation ever since I was a young child.  I knew I was weird, but it wasn't until recently that I actually found out that it was a thing and not just me.  Changing circumstances have also let me start to work on it now and I've occasionally been feeling present for the first time in basically forever.

The thing is, when I feel present I'll have random memories of my past come up.  Like I'll be walking around and something will remind me of that time my parents and I went on a trip or something.  Nothing traumatic.  When I'm feeling present they happen really frequently.  Like a few times per hour.  And to be clear, I'm not talking about flash-backs or anything.  Just kind of mundane memories.

The reason I'm kind of weirded out by this is that I've never had a memory of my past before now.  Not like this at least.  I could remember specifics if I turn my attention to that, but I'd rarely just get reminded of stuff.  Maybe once a week or less and it was always just a hazy ""oh, I guess this looks like that thing from back then"" or something.  Now the memories are quite vivid.  Like I'll actually picture a scene from past which never happened before.

**Can someone please tell me what's normal for memories?**  I don't know if not remembering my past was a dissociation thing, or if this is just a new weird I'm moving into.",2.8299428571428566,5.035518546666669,4.3219047619047615,83.16000000000003,76.86666666666667,7.885714285714287,26.04761904761905,8.738905477910976,2.0524619047619046,1204,46,238,27,28,400,149,300,0.043,0.862,0.095,0.9496,1,0,3,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,1,3,17,11,0,0,17,0,27,0,0,2,4,57,47,24,0,7,20,1,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,23,12,0,0,13,0,0,5,8,4,0,1,13,5,22,7,28,28,3,45,0,0,2,0,9,9,0,13,36,161,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.17915434119111934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340719270161904,0.07637950787858377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553819205509027,0.08171563618370509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14116700145822786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15621893838698447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971053038828248,0.07907193342915679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328960441842389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303243521133177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13924058661261687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780794658262466,0.0,0.10064678532728503,0.0,0.0,0.047958291538454566,0.0880566462289092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112083943337397,0.0,0.16234529799158487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039806267111156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19117751539538627,0.050447282194537715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386502680927164,0.0,0.2242282269336636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708338332488547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221886330354204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756191554201588,0.0,0.0,0.14159354257731882,0.08865469072208572,0.0,0.0,0.17987619236851787,0.08807829563830256,0.0,0.0,0.09775703363044803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192576861867116,0.0,0.4381361966333229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076164839853843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20565935476409108,0.0976336383421126,0.0,0.0,0.1176104754007769,0.09437895979257632,0.18126992529359895,0.0,0.2079681806236169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593249444220636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15555259287367662,0.2120012585618656,0.0,0.0,0.06497187982074143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508154444327676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378010195640754,0.08023152552339233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439339704892486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057650516775568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984491975279776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736311726070313,0.0,0.0,0.08509345231088103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668267284057223,0.0,0.0,0.06520743666222073,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bazerous,2020/02/17,"This is my cry for help My dad died almost 8 years ago of a drug overdose. My mom is emotionally abusive. I'm gay and when I came out, most of my family disowned me. It culminated in PTSD.

I have a degree in psychology and am starting a diploma in IT. I have over $50,000 in student loan debt, so I'm paying for this program out of pocket and with no support. I got through the first term okay and treated it as a deadline to sort things out.

When the term started I had a kitchen job. They changed their hours so that I couldn't get home before 1am on nights before my 8:30 classes. Sleep hygiene is really important for people with PTSD so I had to leave the position.

I'm a really strong student so I took up tutoring. At times I've had up to 15 tutees. The cancellation rate is so high that I might get 6 hours of work a week. The school can't enforce anything, so I just had to stick it out while looking for other opportunities. I did. I applied for 9 scholarships and got declined by all of them. I've applied to other jobs but they didn't want someone on a student schedule. So I spoke with financial services and started on a payment plan. I made the first payment 3 weeks early and my next one is due tomorrow. I can't afford it.

Self-care is really important to me. I exercise about 3 days a week because it keeps my anxiety down. I cook my food at home to reduce food expenses. I stay at my school until 9pm most days studying extra materials to give myself an edge for job applications. I also schedule time off for socialising and relaxation. I am so passionate about what I do and put my heart and soul into it. I don't have a car, I share a two bedroom apartment with two other people so my rent is low. I'm not just throwing my money away at things.

I am ashamed. When I wake up in the morning, I just feel disappointed that sleep - my emotional reset - isn't enough anymore. I wish I was dead.

I can't explain what this is like. I want to cry and get comfort from my dad and then remember that if he was alive he would have disowned me for my sexuality. I want to ask my mom for help but also understand that the mind games that go along with it would ruin the work I've put into my mental health over the years. There's nothing I can do. I hate that I want comfort from the people who broke me down.

I've never self-harmed and don't plan to commit suicide. Currently I would describe my risk as low. I'm living my days right now and doing what I can to survive.

But I feel so alone, lost, helpless, afraid, and empty. All at once. My passion for what I do is dying and I don't know what I am without it. I have so many dreams and want to change the world. Now I just don't see a point in getting out of bed. I don't know what to do without hope that things will get better.

I wish things were better. I think I did my best but it's just not enough.",2.063745196571088,3.693995926298157,3.8389457089368406,88.38870529116171,77.17420435510887,6.692403192432753,24.771208986107013,7.510576382923642,1.098102926396689,2236,78,484,30,51,752,266,597,0.145,0.7440000000000001,0.11,-0.9481,7,1,1,0,0,2,63.0,0,0,4,13,26,27,1,3,26,1,50,14,4,1,4,77,93,43,4,13,14,4,2,1,0,5,3,1,6,0,35,31,4,1,8,5,7,7,17,11,0,5,17,5,76,16,77,70,10,82,1,7,2,3,19,37,0,7,38,329,111,16,0.0,0.08295542927503723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06206340210189538,0.0,0.07010915094111299,0.07251364067403811,0.0,0.11198072984388563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0535607043439636,0.0,0.06943531577966272,0.0,0.0,0.057615756481789876,0.0,0.06545386608248291,0.0,0.06578068613252408,0.0,0.0,0.04268003275291858,0.0,0.11915392819282745,0.0,0.0734756286114623,0.12384381677250067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007764211397894,0.0,0.0,0.14813157131223725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15381471688789886,0.13546018402202448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453274610555465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119429395992532,0.0,0.0,0.15751319968506144,0.0,0.14468685824508726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600319729878312,0.0,0.07080261002101916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191081588500929,0.16932300137177053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182897761475884,0.0671640417608601,0.039790707839931036,0.0,0.11199357228044347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691245699804733,0.0,0.07442186641541093,0.0,0.08296721519423264,0.09385814264335514,0.07397389189747608,0.14045998890938968,0.06953994117225212,0.13789985234186894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20843499874386232,0.062231876238902965,0.0,0.0,0.07695599396842477,0.0,0.0,0.07413497419792654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03420542262894391,0.0,0.06182385938909404,0.0,0.05879433067712383,0.0,0.07642881703515958,0.0,0.0,0.06624916970700971,0.0,0.07098345334649844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055788953208518,0.07427404768370137,0.07069442672688041,0.16399967067779425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053999300529850365,0.0,0.07446094184484743,0.06570362426656268,0.0,0.06718055456141367,0.0,0.0,0.07456288389754348,0.04744346311615987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14561718167743656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661860903450148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16368580697481547,0.14076730478435842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345587508658557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931248898591928,0.059791781067097975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417163038246146,0.055792286986373466,0.0,0.14608025021161222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012961312390762,0.0,0.05932284098475995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486693249099427,0.07462586746688987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658421819402886,0.07945133337820898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860574082987678,0.04486229993552137,0.0,0.0,0.08165173639752953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778840025653783,0.0,0.0,0.1367874841077788,0.07288729626543795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20648107297240745,0.0,0.16848360789339847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610258485431664,0.13498246379350187,0.0,0.1019424057036152,0.0,0.0,0.14920832850191615,0.0,0.0,0.09017375411516566
mentalhealth,realASIMOV,2020/02/17,"I just learned what psychopathy actually is and everything in my life is falling into place.. I am actually shocked by how much of my numerous baffling past experiences and quirks overlap with anti-social personality disorder.

​

I always had major issues showing my emotions to people as a kid since I quickly learned that emotions are just vulnerabilities for other people to exploit. Although emotionally closing myself off from the world protected me as a kid, as an adult I cannot show the people closest to me that I may have love for them nor do I really understand how to process those kinds of emotions.

​

I have always had an issue with authority and although I never managed to push my luck far enough to end up in jail, I am no stranger when it comes to dealing with the law. I now realize that if I keep up with this behaviour I am either headed for an early grave or, end up in prison.

​

I have already been receiving treatment for various other mental health disorders (anxiety, depression, substance abuse etc) for a few years now but just the thought of telling anyone I know that I may have anti-social personality disorder frightens me and I don't know if that's because I'm in shock or because I have toxic motives....",10.917402597402592,8.881339809523812,10.633718614718617,59.96772077922081,57.83116883116883,13.222683982683986,46.47662337662338,11.792908689023552,5.680956363636364,1020,54,160,23,10,337,137,231,0.127,0.8390000000000001,0.035,-0.9485,0,0,0,0,1,0,32.0,0,0,1,1,10,7,0,0,10,0,19,4,1,3,1,36,27,18,1,2,9,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,11,11,0,2,8,2,0,4,5,4,0,0,4,0,27,3,33,21,7,29,0,2,0,1,10,15,0,7,10,129,38,4,0.0,0.10945219920706173,0.1802941750504332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194083798778712,0.0,0.15373091460883825,0.3002728584960326,0.33674622082689826,0.0,0.0,0.07066851359528943,0.0,0.0,0.06459247663789935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126248996083992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795750128769934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523711784075713,0.07956458168087878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176177599965045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4156488914670449,0.16363804305313895,0.0954506231218468,0.10302530069192614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830229157269255,0.09036289392798473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480593766103984,0.09819293347580883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19283616168663004,0.0,0.08210934202445619,0.0,0.09619692215449156,0.10153648598554237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652489407356782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337427556621932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309476484162496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790807135750605,0.0,0.07124720166343232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818475020649405,0.19212872401741335,0.16132089160030602,0.0965147971938516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05917937432800384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764155998339705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074198264526808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333739448152522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616820671325807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33674622082689826,0.05948806355964267
mentalhealth,Lil_Skidoodle,2020/02/17,"I just feel tired. I'm 17 years old, in college in Quebec (works differently here) and I just feel down all the time. I live in residence that my dad pays for, he works his ass off every week to pay for everything and even more so that we can live with momey to spend (we have a boat etc.) I also play football which is my main focus. I have a personal trainer and everything. Even though, I always feel like I'm not doing good enough. All my dad requires from me is that I have good grades. I can't even do that for all he does because I'm always too lazy. I am 110% aware that I am lazy but I can't seem to get past it. He asked me to look for a job if I want to spend money for myself but I haven't even looked for one yet. I also need to take my driver's test but I can't even look to book an appointment because I ""forget"". All I do is play Xbox and I know I should at least do something productive but in the moment, I always seem not to care. And also I'm always a bit rude with my parents and am not grateful enough for what they do. I know I should tell them, but I still always forget. I can't sleep and I'm always tired, and living in residence doesn't help me cuz the other guys that live here do the same stuff but don't really seem to care. Like they always come in and I can't be in peace alone because my roommate lets them in, since we're all on the football team. I'm just tired of being given everything and not being grateful or at least able to help a little. And the fact that I can't do those things just puts me down even more. Anybody know what I should do?",1.5477568922305769,2.8377154005847984,3.11275271512114,94.50065789473686,77.74269005847952,6.0553049289891385,18.939431913116128,6.5431188927421005,-0.17709891395154553,1225,23,291,10,28,404,149,342,0.156,0.81,0.034,-0.9895,3,1,1,0,0,0,33.0,2,0,4,4,20,9,1,0,12,0,34,5,2,1,6,57,61,25,0,6,16,3,3,2,0,3,3,0,0,2,15,16,0,1,9,5,5,2,13,1,0,1,1,6,45,8,35,53,15,25,0,0,3,1,20,15,1,5,10,200,60,11,0.08059787795995411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347509451831285,0.0,0.19336228165609207,0.4694472371684762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534813597878602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739515496579333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799200806489364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643498162943148,0.0,0.0,0.06942793523866389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842076280842782,0.0,0.0,0.07053174614227081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665583062069391,0.08988793901220891,0.3194048295351539,0.0,0.06790718833923383,0.0,0.21730852718770505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225812637546662,0.05757914011880873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04210906467933945,0.0,0.0,0.13520335218478027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980457076067644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804611733241028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799809574186672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328834577305586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241679088735362,0.0,0.07875210403033059,0.08078024753814518,0.28467761144086096,0.0,0.20304575517628104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05976230525530257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457391489657581,0.0,0.05461520799514138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894944053587385,0.0,0.0769397943527615,0.0,0.07037495822955588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102312863302076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051633064447762084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201198431504349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667139752396373,0.0,0.08065608478351281,0.0,0.0,0.06204818410962265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06436556945134263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226528739079044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059957369621245,0.0,0.07044609783227218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05354564878829947,0.0,0.07918700587787704,0.0,0.046997270789414514,0.277906212864456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0475387166397931,0.0,0.06465075611042087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173524301418804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05190239090098207
mentalhealth,KyraChey,2020/02/17,"I'm sure I have more than just depression and I'm too scared to sleep. TLDR; I'm a 23 year old in Washington with depression and have insomnia, possibly more wrong with me, what kind of professional might be able to help me?

I'm sure you guys hear this a lot but I don't have much money and so I don't want to go from clinic to clinic trying to find the right place for me to be, so I'm posting here to try and get advice or even if there's another subreddit that might help.

Some background: I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety when I was 10/11 years old. My memory isn't nearly what it should be but I can remember never being satisfied with my meds and that they didn't help much. I was still depressed, I've cut, and I just felt like the meds I was on made me emotionless. I decided last year to stop taking my meds, just to see how it would feel to be the real me. Overall, most days, I love being able to understand my thought process and my most amazing partner understands I have bad days and he helps me immensely.

Without my medication, I feel like my head is ""clear"" now and I'm either realizing that other parts of my life are starting to suffer, or it's always happened but I haven't been able to process it. I think I have more than just depression.. I get into screaming matches in my head until I start crying. I make up arguements in my head that would never happen and I get severe anxiety about those imaginary fights. I get night terrors so bad I wake up in a panic and I'm scared to go to sleep for multiple nights after an episode. Most days I'm running on maybe a few hours of sleep or so. I get unreasonably emotional about the smallest things and sometimes I feel like I'm going to ruin my relationship. I've become scared of my own thoughts but I'm also scared of even trying to help or try to treat these things because what if it doesn't get better? Sometimes I lay in bed and tell myself ""I can sleep if I kill myself"" and I'm almost at my breaking point. I went to therapy for a few months, it was too expensive and I just don't think it was a good fit..

I actually just don't even know what to ask for anymore.. I just need some fucking sleep and to just know what's wrong with me. Maybe just an answer will make me feel better.. sorry to just rant but I just don't know what to do. Thank you for any and all advice. I'm more than happy to answer any questions that may help lead to the right answer, there's just way too much stuff going on too put in one post.",2.9432543520309484,4.269400769825921,4.26351595744681,87.51612500000002,74.18375241779495,7.645822050290135,23.95014506769826,8.238735603445708,1.2382456866537717,1966,57,423,32,40,649,220,517,0.187,0.7040000000000001,0.109,-0.993,0,0,0,0,1,1,47.0,0,2,1,3,33,36,4,6,13,0,39,17,9,5,6,100,92,38,1,8,26,0,5,3,1,7,6,2,1,2,25,24,0,1,22,0,2,8,12,22,0,1,13,8,58,14,63,66,19,54,0,7,1,2,19,19,1,18,26,281,83,2,0.1801710344430531,0.0,0.05860697987741505,0.0,0.0,0.11737403309104025,0.0,0.0,0.060138421780904575,0.0,0.0,0.04802757038336924,0.04997224461908732,0.0,0.0,0.08168165449953715,0.06297501300514266,0.09188689879941876,0.0,0.05956041758878225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05614519863413301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029019200720868,0.036610196769801207,0.06632825074102831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623109234737907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596980705189552,0.11619541203797862,0.0,0.25863507993099777,0.06095660246307277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755605446339252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900126901614125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146651806436372,0.0858094820039947,0.05766414921884981,0.0,0.05489102046915022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05552173936841072,0.18826385842256574,0.0,0.1365271345561402,0.050372971844667484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05946588351610198,0.10621643382267536,0.06393180547713402,0.0,0.0,0.1849074606832677,0.0,0.06768861674975046,0.0,0.2415296930895392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059144058745094576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644418501721676,0.06254013563555783,0.0990172886502883,0.048954480059573965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04242004330587887,0.08802246663839877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051058323502106866,0.054203797643896566,0.0568273963811268,0.08017704302783256,0.0,0.12067068048734922,0.0,0.20012940261397685,0.060501120749067085,0.0,0.12742199690106654,0.0,0.0,0.04793693358683698,0.0,0.13244644106056586,0.044531513033545314,0.0926393393029561,0.0,0.0,0.1127188738028068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12603946174518266,0.0,0.040696185267211256,0.0,0.0,0.0704639629669751,0.0,0.06503589092089736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274679451436073,0.0,0.056773287991189136,0.06770525671305586,0.11503603141498495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603738843962992,0.0672775975515056,0.0,0.0,0.06835802721848706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447875462149592,0.0680328865932896,0.1025767193177068,0.0,0.0,0.2405101820914435,0.0,0.04785766254288255,0.0,0.0,0.06784732842487287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3005019196823109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879584001706744,0.06722890741304945,0.08501732367601203,0.0,0.04796160694754509,0.050210350773090544,0.0,0.0,0.06875090963165667,0.0,0.0,0.1132060451506458,0.0,0.045155398446426805,0.0,0.05249247515434306,0.05529242725775757,0.06868042664899372,0.0,0.07979841964661258,0.07696421592239591,0.0,0.09535711736529498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309907419936234,0.0,0.0,0.12504293395201327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03542318139501705,0.04767046028984825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055673451328354315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057892815928248575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532555567255266,0.13132582829376813,0.0,0.11602423904192535
mentalhealth,throwaway123456789ns,2020/02/17,"I think I’m transgender This is a throwaway for obvious reasons. 

I’m 15 and born a male. Being a guy just doesn’t feel right. But also I get along with guys and really only guys and enjoy normally masculine things. I know enjoying masculine things and hanging out with only guys doesn’t invalidate anything but that makes me feel like I’m not. Being a guy just never felt real. I’ve disconnected my body and my mind. I’m disgusted by what I am, not who I am, but what I am. I’ve always felt like if I wasn’t me I’d be happier. It never clicked that it might be my gender that’s triggering that. If I had the choice I’d go back and be born a girl. I enjoy feminine clothing and makeup. I see girls clothes and their rooms and how happy they are, and I wish that it could be me. All but two of my friends hate trans people. Like genuinely think trans people should be killed, so I don’t think I’d be safe if I was trans. Trans life expectancy is less than half of the cisgender life expectancy. From an early age I thought if I had three wishes one of them would be to have been born a girl. But due to my surroundings and the fact that I know I’ll “never be a real girl” I’m going to live my life as a male unless something changes or I just can’t take it anymore. I’m not saying I’m trans, I still haven’t came out to myself yet, I really don’t want to be trans. I’m not transphobic but everyone I’m surrounded by is.  I really hope this feeling either goes away or I am able to come to terms with who I really am.",1.6175785050862466,3.2059439721362253,3.7411267138434314,88.78693111455108,78.3188854489164,7.586421937195933,21.752432551968155,8.418075326091056,1.123709509066784,1185,33,266,24,28,406,153,323,0.05,0.7929999999999999,0.157,0.985,0,0,1,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,3,0,9,13,3,0,12,0,36,4,1,4,6,76,69,28,1,14,21,0,5,3,1,3,3,1,1,11,18,19,0,1,12,0,0,5,14,3,0,4,9,8,35,10,24,45,4,25,0,0,2,0,18,7,0,8,16,171,53,0,0.09954284535960888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960437747023974,0.08282762155027668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871975463627272,0.0,0.0,0.08191528013085628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935237799654461,0.07654230366838975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056966086638416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385049657480885,0.0,0.0,0.10530313148019667,0.08574734715141119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794768621446014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951174545560282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15099556062499989,0.07111342861450555,0.1911534838958693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690655539812957,0.0,0.05200702822096535,0.0,0.11314498596727447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4928153350493312,0.0,0.10596520987699183,0.0,0.09827795137368546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886850593046898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012940989087608,0.0,0.10941228907867262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21093016652749988,0.14589481841811058,0.0,0.08789815616200305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644562224040089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559922830113233,0.10050989733777076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23032073688927665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09753085350515757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745280820475744,0.1514136389367736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13802095071849627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22660310144298526,0.2550787827103842,0.1023466238671612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500904604423938,0.0,0.07916046598722122,0.0,0.0,0.0793227598959737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663294558124152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949504488891895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484383145046926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226368663606575,0.19134910782752068,0.0,0.0790259001718044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723889577519663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058712949259289465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228938719148664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071238131970797,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trashacc88,2020/02/17,"how to deal with the result of years of isolation, anger issues & binge eating I don't have the best english but I have it's still readable.

19M

I've been quite isolated from the outside world and people my age for about 5 years now and was probably more awake at night than at day in that time. It all started after getting social anxiety from getting bullied  even longer ago which also resulted in me developing IBS. Over the time I also developed some food intolerances which just further on withhold me from normally spending time outside and socialize. I've been spending my time playing video games and a big part of that were first person shooters in which I have gained so much anger and frustration over the years that I have never let out. All of that turned me into an insecure and easily aggravated person in a way, that I have become afraid of myself. In the last few months, i have started to get thoughts where i badly hurt (to put it mildly)my loved ones, the first time it happened it was a morning after spending another night alone in my room, it made me so afraid that i couldn't even leave my room because I'd be afraid to actually see someone I've had thoughts about. Overall, I'm noticing how my mental health decreases, social, mental and moral barriers disappearing and I'm feeling almost no sympathy or empathy for others. I was depressed for weeks when the isolation started and pornography addiction has also been a problem for a long time. I barely enjoy life anymore, I had some previous attempts to change my life, but it all ended quickly, i feel like I'm in a cycle of my thoughts. My physical and mental health is what always bring me down when wanting to change. Thoughts like I will never be fully healthy (physically) or potentially one of my bad thoughts becoming reality, demotivate me to a point where I just want to lay in bed forever so that I will never be harm for anyone. I eat out of bored and frustration to the point where I force myself to finish foods. Also I can't focus or sit still for a long time, which makes what I still enjoy the most (playing singleplayer video games) almost impossible. I know that I probably need professional help but visiting a therapist or going to a clinic is the absolute last thing I would want to do as long as I still have some what of a clear mind.",7.67837837837838,7.390606702702705,7.78355855855856,72.20885135135137,63.05405405405406,11.003603603603604,35.84234234234234,10.504223727775694,3.7656099099099123,1872,77,332,40,24,608,221,444,0.154,0.747,0.099,-0.9841,0,3,0,1,0,1,36.0,0,0,0,6,26,23,4,4,23,0,30,11,0,6,7,62,59,31,0,8,9,0,2,2,0,3,6,0,3,2,24,15,4,2,8,6,3,5,7,15,0,4,15,3,41,8,55,36,12,76,1,2,1,1,11,27,0,10,44,235,65,1,0.0,0.0,0.06998415108888198,0.07818066847599668,0.0,0.0,0.06357161644894008,0.0,0.14362577307224894,0.07427580822394897,0.0,0.22940398902465164,0.059673184405472014,0.07770390101251114,0.0,0.0,0.07520013544793837,0.054862293041869,0.0,0.07112267638033576,0.050145265569088236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975918166822702,0.04371720821462799,0.15840865135963775,0.0,0.0,0.07526117361023624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517313443433159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04625067576654807,0.07393570915280871,0.0617686034961553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467660732719185,0.0,0.0,0.06351879934954302,0.0,0.0,0.09473505042134292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252319749488327,0.051233690645612714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220026285044128,0.17343775130981454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240543651949954,0.0,0.040757669276313774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341793220122001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246081223221486,0.0,0.0,0.04806950346467601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677311049346232,0.0,0.0,0.07485252960114845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03941305798847145,0.11691568943265583,0.0,0.07593654207716607,0.0,0.07333413384802367,0.10130980050925918,0.07007331000872448,0.0,0.0,0.19039833976770346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472619424915088,0.0678591031758174,0.047870768164953184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21681759002267548,0.0,0.07241238521827167,0.0,0.057242765450395174,0.0,0.05271927087726358,0.053176262330438484,0.16593464290720172,0.0,0.0,0.13460060066709215,0.07026613220933305,0.0,0.08164876828170486,0.0,0.0,0.09719279118080583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766108449758387,0.0,0.04971861735184572,0.12523871776102444,0.0,0.0,0.13558898182088802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464324872534896,0.06862221301151501,0.0,0.07209405869831449,0.0,0.07627844518489814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05714810579161931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21931528973395206,0.06076445644331591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228216599181724,0.0,0.2290889142626547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326742306592952,0.04764470604767205,0.0,0.0,0.284671165578384,0.29272589682500105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800605782678591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689928489659733,0.05692456260976734,0.05752598652448908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05094475600364373,0.0,0.0,0.13854762507924
mentalhealth,NyxSilhouette,2020/02/17,"My Ex went into a fury last night, we tussled and argued and she is in jail now... I am scared for her. She has had mental health issues for a long time. She struggles with inhalant addictions and suicidal tendencies.

I met her when I was at a low point. I’ve personally been in a malaise for the better part of a decade and she was kind to me, understanding. She would become furious that I was so undermotivated and depressed and her anger would run wild. Calling me names and belittling me if I ever voiced a concern or asked her why she was being negative. It just seemed like she couldn’t rein her rage in. Her mother was abusive and she learned about inhalants from her. She won’t talk to or be friendly with anyone and the polarity she swings from highs to lows about even little things. Sometimes her rage seemed to be a different thing entirely then her. I think I told myself that most times after she’d belittle me. That I could be strong and patient but it just became insurmountable. I have done a lot of self evaluation, sought counseling and everyone says to just let her go. 

Obviously with her being arrested I can’t imagine things will ever be the same. I didn’t call the police, she and the neighbors did. I am left alone in an apartment I can barely afford, I was just laid off, and my whole focus was on us. We made travel plans in March to go visit friends of mine in Atlanta. I fought so hard to keep some semblance of respect for myself and not shut her out. I am writing this because I don’t know what to do. It just happened last night and while writing this is the first time I’ve been able to cry at all. Old habits of disassociating when I am treated cruelly makes this all the harder.  I just feel to blame and loathe the thought that I couldn’t be better.

She called me from jail just to ridicule me and belittle me more. She blamed me and I feel guilty because maybe if I didn’t push back or tell her to stop calling me names, maybe she wouldn’t be having such a terrible time. Her whole life seems littered with tragedy and I know in my mind that I am not capable of helping her in the ways she needs but I am the first person to befriend her in 3 years. I treated her like my kin. I miss her and I am happy to be able to write this and work through my feelings.  

I can hear the cliche truths: “you aren’t to blame, don’t beat yourself up. There are plenty of people who will treat you better. Work on loving yourself.”

I’ve never been good at that which is why I feel like I failed at loving her. I was thinking about visiting her in jail tomorrow but I know that’s foolish. I just don’t know who else to tell all my dumb quips to. To discuss our favorite shows, or politics. To hold in my arms when they are having a bad dream. I didn’t get a lot from her and that’s what I need to learn. My worth. But tonight I just feel worthless because it was never going to work the way I dreamed.",3.28817907148121,4.744083225423728,4.01217391304348,89.14194546794403,73.52542372881356,6.960943257184968,25.198968312453946,7.505811317475913,1.0495725865880612,2293,73,489,27,46,730,272,590,0.18899999999999997,0.7120000000000001,0.099,-0.9948,3,1,0,0,0,0,52.0,4,2,1,12,25,37,8,2,24,0,62,6,1,2,9,104,97,39,1,10,21,3,6,3,3,6,3,3,1,3,24,30,0,4,19,4,1,9,17,18,0,2,24,11,102,19,67,53,12,69,0,6,0,2,80,29,1,13,32,352,126,6,0.15399236490912505,0.09122788569972842,0.0,0.08393720393885751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974482418925867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053837521022642686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198103687439934,0.0,0.0,0.05920531161685315,0.06428859621687001,0.14080847451472034,0.08503623423823496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20429059905798552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.314486843901552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06147518645358008,0.0,0.0845766909641432,0.0,0.0,0.06631669912450333,0.0,0.0,0.08044462286295556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879382715458237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432043050644858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05085525234294715,0.13929491028957586,0.0,0.07357315193424449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946579166272744,0.05500608813010417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309858269246657,0.0,0.0,0.11897411913421264,0.0,0.04022732743227227,0.0,0.13127611459994654,0.0645807447837535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808746986077215,0.08196386796107688,0.06897345588778488,0.0,0.0,0.08184334144538752,0.08678029353838282,0.0,0.051608918089424034,0.08135069414700445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036401024634332,0.0,0.06843774472650074,0.0,0.08017967553464582,0.16926035301159126,0.12552433048809195,0.0,0.0,0.08365657752467152,0.0787338132107544,0.054384680715294,0.11284933655969435,0.07717040244238328,0.0,0.06813919854372656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091880182665666,0.13898412159382145,0.0728556495283145,0.05139554967357573,0.0,0.1547060285318532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759404221881464,0.0,0.07774419513477683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141833873499455,0.1187684051460841,0.0,0.0,0.14451140273832772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079454133406444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833793623750854,0.0,0.053379458190501126,0.1344601932762396,0.0,0.0,0.07278627978511175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061230454688343115,0.07708661072964798,0.0,0.0,0.21028329819677824,0.08032381054354269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615119323484983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.064372256192841,0.0,0.08049312756502736,0.0,0.0842213266191888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188661489342285,0.1345961144188089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15345852700242152,0.09867208949459906,0.0,0.06112636831188331,0.17958837270461067,0.0,0.0,0.07357315193424449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801557413514166,0.092616927202941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222319715102792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137623252712233,0.13895415735033445,0.17192697603664556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816241354108605,0.0,0.0,0.10939175777464892,0.0,0.0,0.049583017081735535
mentalhealth,LucianHodoboc,2020/02/17,"Depression linked with gut health in several scientific studies  

Recent studies show that the intestinal microbiome (also known as the gut flora) is related to depression, at least partially: [https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6780009/](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6780009/)

>MDD  is a multifaceted mental disorder characterized by a dysfunction of   neurochemical, neuroendocrine, immune and metabolic systems. The   microbiota-gut-brain axis is a bidirectional network linking the central   and enteric nervous systems through the same neural, immune and   metabolic routes that are dysregulated in depression.  Therefore,  gut-brain axis abnormalities in depressed patients may, at  least  partly, account for the symptomatic presentations of depression.  This  review highlights how metabolites modulated by the intestinal   microbiota can influence mood through their direct action on central   receptors, through activation of peripheral receptors on neural, immune   or neuroendocrine pathways, and through epigenetic regulation of  histone  deacetylation or DNA methylation.

Some  antidepressants present antibacterial effects that could be related to  their effectiveness for MDD treatment.  Conversely, some antimicrobials  present antidepressant effects. There is still a lot more to be  researched and discovered on this topic.

[https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/27744123](https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/27744123)

[https://www.webmd.com/depression/news/20190204/could-germs-in-your-gut-send-you-into-depression#1](https://www.webmd.com/depression/news/20190204/could-germs-in-your-gut-send-you-into-depression#1)

Therefore,  as annoying as it can be, when nutritionists recommend us to work with a  naturopathic doctor, we might want to abstain from dismissing them as ""quacks"".

I understand  your struggles, as I have also dealt with episodes of depression,  generalized anxiety and severe OCD throughout the past years. I'm merely  posting this to raise awareness, so please don't be offended or  anything of that nature. God bless!",20.579345475241887,23.80156927091633,14.155927717700633,25.50443227091637,35.57370517928286,17.529994308480365,57.76920887877064,15.438520173184436,10.516123278315312,1761,100,137,65,14,484,162,251,0.146,0.779,0.075,-0.9689,0,0,1,0,0,0,126.0,2,1,3,4,7,12,2,2,13,0,16,11,6,7,0,34,19,19,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,8,10,0,1,7,1,1,2,1,10,0,0,0,0,8,1,37,12,8,21,1,6,0,0,7,8,0,8,8,106,16,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008000367138196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604323363206917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033146152285915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803043026172916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30071757377604186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6488015087718382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388792206072445,0.12850283797441467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334507600491538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067357056783298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652200810125305,0.1331856965262097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595533961420456,0.11984897001473828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378130803885465,0.0,0.0,0.12023947467650675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239626742096596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28366511005867195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026212401591428,0.0,0.0,0.13124915066492285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306990210411647,0.15101777506111574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405096768233317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913998276155133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084825470503433
mentalhealth,chrissyks_17,2020/02/17,"OCD overload OCD taking over me

I just feel like no one gets me. No one understands the daily battle inside my head everyday. No one understands why I do the things I do. I know I look crazy and sound crazy but I can’t help it. My mom will say things that may sound like good advice to her, but in reality if helps me in no way. I feel so alone. 

All of my sibling go through physical diseases and I feel like they think I have it good. One sibling has no idea that I even have OCD and Trich. I think that they think I have it good but in reality I’m suffering inside everyday. Sometimes I feel like my parents forget that I have the things I do. 

I just feel done. OCD is literally consuming me at this point. It keeps getting worse. I dread doing anything because my OCD will get in the way. 

I feel so misunderstood. Like a complete lunatic. Let me clarify that I don’t want to die or hurt myself, but it’s just so hard living.",1.149293193717277,3.327503968586392,2.9617251308900516,90.83808507853405,82.61256544502619,6.333089005235603,22.11544502617801,7.554174236665415,0.8621788481675394,722,24,158,12,20,240,97,191,0.24600000000000002,0.6,0.154,-0.9586,1,1,0,0,0,3,19.0,0,0,2,0,7,12,1,1,5,0,17,1,1,0,1,30,38,12,1,2,9,2,7,5,0,3,0,3,0,0,14,3,0,1,13,0,0,1,7,4,0,4,1,11,33,8,10,33,1,12,0,2,1,0,8,7,0,3,7,105,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279707432923428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195508952286269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498923516522104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036519028102457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102638875035016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197983435185208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812519082697827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624057117798477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3501899229106031,0.2473901151266617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18092257608228696,0.0,0.06560165370027603,0.2904521741162415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340280365816608,0.0,0.11846470658771653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474088562107788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12357043711064365,0.13030666733864485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259968258333008,0.0,0.0,0.06343742974849631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803521983784165,0.0,0.2819668726430292,0.0,0.1019269983930232,0.0,0.09693231234126437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519047771207754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3128740157333711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817159825130384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911886755207743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917947433914249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416343839881107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678915942126897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23006012578402615,0.2218890709162933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24033385824598444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808373401794089,0.1832462704404859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415781886700526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176332549132978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dislexicgold,2020/02/17,"LAST NIGHT AT THE AQUATIC CENTRE / EGOS AND ANXIOUS MATES 15TH FEB 2020  

LAST NIGHT AT THE AQUATIC CENTRE /

EGOS AND ANXIOUS MATES

15TH FEB 2020 

okay, so last  we went on our fortnightly trip to the aquatic center, since the begining of the season when i was at the hostel and i met these doodes weve been coming here since. 

So any ways were at the pools were flipping and jumping having fun, 

(im gunna do my best to explain the reason of this note without over dramatising it and will do my best to write down those current thoughts and emotions of the subject last night)

and then another one of our mates jedd rocked up with his mate that none of us had met before and we were kinda like whos this dude but it wasnt really like that, but he was cool.

Then another mate of ours rocked up and he was by himself, hes a lifty and the boys i was with know him abit better then i do but im still friends with him but its kinda still in those early stages were he isnt really his full self around me and its not quite as %100 as the circle of friendship as what normally ends up being.

so then another one of the dudes we know from work shows up and this dude knows everyone but cause he isnt a lifty im probaly the closest with him cause our departments are the closes at work ive crossed paths with him the most and we get along pretty good.

and this dude was with a few of his mates which id never met before and i dont think anyone else had, and this is were im going with this whole note…

and that is that with these new guys that noone had met before for us the boys that were already at the pools its kinda like we dont know one another good enough to introduce ourselves to these new dudes and even if we did i feel like all of our EGOs are and were to big to say “hey fellas im aaron” nice to meet you.

but no we all sat around few and far between ourselves in such a confined space and swimming in the same pool and using the same diving board, within the 3 other times people showed up to the pool while we were there, although we KNOW ONE another but its like we dont actaully know anything about one another.

there was one of our mates which i really noticed and we was standing/swimming away from the main pack of laughs and bickering by himself watching us jump, and although i was swimming and doing my best to mingle with everyone i felt and used to feel like that to like that was me not to long ago but ive grown and learnt from that place to were i am now.

and this individaul is a dude who ive watched come to canada in the past few months, hes a dude that had never really done drugs before like hes a straight edged dude around my age and ive kinda watched him sort of go/get abit anxious since the time ive met him and while hes been in canada, and i know exactly why hes begining to look/feel this way and that is….

DRUGS, hes come to a place surrounded by drugs and party scene, and has found himself being caught in those nights were you take a few caps and other people are to and you all feel the same amazing way and you feel so much love for one another and just that amazing feeling MDMA gives you.

but then you wake up the next day feeling abit scatteerd, and those nights keep going on and on and on,

until you find yourself looking abit anxious and abit seperated from the crowds leaving me to examine you and to write a note about you, because i know these feelings and emotions all to well, so much i can see it and i know that feeling!

so if i can and i will help these indivauls through those days of anxiousness and hiding behind a smile on there face were in reality they feel abit off, but the EGO of the adulencent male is to strong to stop and ask for help.

and that right there ladies and gentleman is the begining of sucidal thoughts and mental health!

\#SPEAKOUT",5.012915247772902,5.0572111049935975,5.198704879178361,87.38716130438337,68.55185659411012,8.439382134197839,27.500503991064374,8.058908269544373,1.4480394529653742,3007,85,653,35,47,947,293,781,0.024,0.8320000000000001,0.14400000000000002,0.9985,2,0,3,1,0,0,40.0,21,9,1,8,24,25,0,0,41,2,67,7,2,5,7,149,118,84,0,3,16,0,10,8,8,2,4,1,0,5,45,80,0,3,27,10,0,15,13,0,1,7,42,17,77,25,101,72,22,107,0,0,5,1,85,44,0,8,52,445,122,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04319839095104812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377748827804945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033139748133831616,0.3577016792207403,0.0,0.2752690783909601,0.0,0.03407487346396905,0.04993217057392784,0.04010266741991469,0.13014668044313,0.04555827751186549,0.0,0.045785756183903806,0.0,0.0,0.02970685908640851,0.0,0.16587095773371022,0.0,0.15342515021594502,0.04309990616551356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012333355735492,0.0,0.12593611373091207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285681834496823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987023248906736,0.1713422623913534,0.0,0.16954256782684804,0.0,0.04070972230934393,0.10963493056301526,0.043162500504397495,0.05035366460968857,0.0,0.03218733432832712,0.0,0.0,0.09313191970523203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24640599165197685,0.06962896720274085,0.04679080983784907,0.0,0.04454059125765974,0.0,0.0,0.05343263386447008,0.0376505825117807,0.0,0.050921404478182775,0.04674862214408886,0.08308735077072657,0.08174896113027832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048252803260505836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05180033275393744,0.0,0.0,0.06532868973554183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631971302282054,0.0,0.0,0.043315655093668685,0.0,0.0,0.24103880071019276,0.15889385680415238,0.0,0.051600645309292405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904657713665132,0.0,0.0,0.04312669907920244,0.08184599607110589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04398295340176017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04911086394657694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038897789598152495,0.0,0.07164793979525146,0.0,0.07517096441287023,0.09413223908378203,0.051827530677676883,0.22866059157600285,0.047747470008644266,0.0,0.05548223578265535,0.0,0.0,0.23115666219506864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04652065319593118,0.06756991216781953,0.0,0.1018301100364212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04957843777874479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05183297641773686,0.0,0.0,0.1248770628943742,0.0501050916500475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041617259878138316,0.0,0.038754013112325264,0.0,0.0,0.03883346615987124,0.0,0.05083859041845403,0.0,0.0,0.12093599892195685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778356209395577,0.040742523851325436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03664074976360512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03122579661998015,0.0,0.07737626941119327,0.056832585892430273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758574697598661,0.08417840826363966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604469011618845,0.0,0.0,0.0438163396614096,0.04517548441120888,0.04397347090901284,0.054408058192609264,0.0,0.046976358409373406,0.0,0.07095563161112367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NagisaLynne,2020/02/17,"Is it normal to dissociate after consensual sex? Me and my boyfriend have ""sex"". We just do foreplay because I want to wait for marriage for the real thing.

I've been sexually assulted in my past. It wasn't bad considering people were actually raped, but none the less I was mildly traumatized. I like to think I've grown past it.

I love this man to the moon and back and forever, and we're waiting until we're older to get married. So for now don't have real sex. When we do play around it's the best time ever, but part of me regrets it because at the end of day it's practically sex. I still consent and I still love every bit of it. He's my first sexual partner because none of my other partners were willing to have sex since it was early in the relationship and then we just never worked out and broke up.

After we mess around I tend to dissociate and not really be that responsive. It's like all of a sudden I've fallen into an abyss. I'm not actively regretting or feeling guilty. I feel nothing and just can't interact that much with him. Is this normal? Is this dissociation? Is it because of the ""sex""?.

This occurred to me after we didn't have ""sex"" on Valentines Day because we just wanted to cuddle. He's never seen me this perky or happy around him and I'm not sure if it just happened to be a good mental health day or because we didn't have ""sex"". Please help!

TL;DR: am I weird for dissociation after engaging in consentual foreplay with my soulmate for life?",3.316341807909602,5.012523779661019,5.123750000000001,80.22065324858758,73.91525423728814,7.7641242937853105,26.52895480225989,8.472884824447931,1.8990480225988693,1165,42,226,21,24,398,148,295,0.09699999999999999,0.715,0.188,0.9876,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,7,0,0,3,15,17,1,0,10,0,25,16,0,0,5,56,40,20,0,7,14,0,2,2,2,1,2,0,0,3,20,24,0,2,3,1,0,2,12,7,0,1,9,3,27,10,39,28,8,38,0,3,1,14,20,11,0,4,27,163,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.1156415750252066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164776742659979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112128839122054,0.09894483376853996,0.4334290037088949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436130922670985,0.0,0.1293742945579277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22927338154738844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049582496351542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719250811537463,0.09984366512378594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983708673583912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079836575817823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191278795871945,0.0,0.0,0.09939447169948017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104791577099746,0.1261483648371713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259628657477316,0.0,0.0,0.07942988526466335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837019861932812,0.11578890092339515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139066897833211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942288462592092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711314524176306,0.0,0.1827932292142688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322150393536047,0.11370657016101365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832691387597606,0.2262485386281787,0.08215487548517833,0.0,0.0,0.13008041720309335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697641117046569,0.0759158864048969,0.0,0.0,0.1272275888586956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802668687243354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892728743148003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168742520923043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872795144672523,0.07593176758521024,0.0,0.0,0.0690998976866656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979196667330626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627140235887865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ijstmdthacctrn,2020/02/17,"How hard is it dealing with a break up whilst having depression? 
I have a friend who is kinda reclusive and I only learned via iMessage, I ask briefly how he was since he seemed out of it in class but he says he's okay. I sorta know his job hunt isn't going all that well either but my attempts to ask / suggest something have been left on read. It's been about a week or so since I learned about it but I'm wondering if I should call or just take it as a sign to leave him alone, as I'm typically not the initiator and a majority of my friend's are paired up/never really had to console or 'experience' seeing someone go through a breakup so I'm not exactly sure what to do without crossing a line of uninterested vs too pushy.",2.7970971302428254,4.2380500728476855,4.321473509933778,86.49205573951436,74.76158940397352,7.417439293598234,27.81512141280353,8.07648339933343,1.672509492273731,575,23,124,9,12,192,101,151,0.08900000000000001,0.861,0.051,-0.5176,1,1,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,0,8,1,13,0,0,2,3,31,25,15,0,2,13,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,0,5,1,0,3,4,1,1,0,4,3,10,5,18,20,3,11,0,1,1,0,15,5,0,8,2,77,18,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19040618263193065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437372793152063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18772453273313508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895343379842463,0.15834393834863833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983399400660713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840737074368431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20896473307914498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646874586789037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18243607717023294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010354528194292,0.0,0.0,0.19466347717937296,0.19974624987223194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982109049938973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18389301977037664,0.0,0.1177747058067726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619954657314535,0.0,0.0,0.14649928326083775,0.16736400758280026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041541040840373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15576980537447022,0.14153153037717886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732701054977677,0.0,0.13822725883930365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746798127377556,0.0,0.16529717767359886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772183510183025,0.19937018318692892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mynameisyeeth,2020/02/17,"I feel like crying when i talk to anyone that's superior/an authority I always feel like crying when i talk to someone whos more superior/has an authority than me. This counts teachers, parents, heck even sometimes my upperclassmen, anyone who has authority(?) If that makes sense.

I only wrote here because it happened recently when i tried to ask my teachers for a specific teacher and he wasn't in the teacher's room. They told me (very politely and kindly) to look for them in another class. But even so the urge to cry was there.

I really dont understand why, the urge just comes when i start talking to them. This has been going on for as long as i can remember and now im in 10th grade in highschool. I feel embaressed because when i was a kid i thought ""oh it would just go away when i grow up"" but- here we are.

I do notice that i ONLY have the urge to cry when they start talking about me. Specificly when they start  critiquing me. I feel frustrated because i know they mean no harm and they're trying to help me, but i cant help but feel guilty and have the urge to just- burst out crying.

So far i have had times when i just straight up cry but the more i get older, the more i try and learn to surpress these feelings by bitting my tounge, try to distract myself from the conversation, and so on. Most of the time i would just end up with watery eyes and people asking me ""what's wrong?""

I never really told anyone this problem (exept my parents but thats because they notice how i start having watery eyes when i talk to those people) because it's embarassing. How come i still feel like crying when someone tries to help me? Am i really that sensitive? Even when i know and understand clearly that it's okay? Can someone explain why i act like this?",4.567095238095238,5.521762200000001,5.3363571428571435,82.77805952380953,69.85714285714286,8.233333333333334,28.29761904761905,8.472884824447931,1.9244476190476187,1390,48,276,21,24,452,163,350,0.13,0.782,0.087,-0.9654,2,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,1,0,7,0,31,11,1,1,12,1,20,2,2,3,2,52,52,35,0,4,12,2,7,4,0,2,0,0,1,1,18,14,0,0,16,0,0,6,5,5,0,0,9,10,50,6,35,41,5,45,0,0,3,0,29,14,1,2,29,187,68,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05799489345487885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308515351655545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14620483369138915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031773287789622,0.0,0.06548421351567185,0.0,0.0,0.2124383722615289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760929175847095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007849963592225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5359251665126488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816863454915714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617323515974585,0.0,0.0,0.1381059820344835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466922628261853,0.1493782740051023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036414688773224686,0.0,0.07922274337121693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061634321308336626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015268799399833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528654546339031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258046002305213,0.07660915439809378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13620503710252854,0.0,0.0,0.061681147284872236,0.058529345464947626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046524416737429616,0.0,0.0,0.07592230618849401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05375592645035198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870484085596573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601798884715588,0.0,0.0,0.15478429373342212,0.0,0.0,0.0966405914070768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06669223323493148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13395229648942675,0.0,0.06881904777841473,0.0,0.078955028726059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771664213524315,0.0,0.06893378651677715,0.0,0.19733236583597424,0.0,0.05566146379955138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801058340709548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05533297437326184,0.08128373318285441,0.0,0.0,0.13320017017095453,0.0,0.2366041765504488,0.0,0.0,0.14511758851557685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057508718617147375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578445342105354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902389912495396,0.07620457593835714,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,v3ritasRonin,2020/02/17,"A start 
So here's me reaching out
 
The hardest part for to start improving myself, is my issue with connection. I can't for the life me trust that anyone would want to know me.  I hate so many things about myself that I ruin most relationships, even more so recently. 

I don't trust anyone, at least not fully, I just can't comprehend why anyone would want me in their life. 

I have never actually believed a compliment and just play it off, I'm good at wearing my mask. Compliments to me  just feel like a lie, someone's sympathy telling me things to make me feel better. No at all real or true, and I can't shake it. 

I never believe them! If I hate myself why wouldn't everybody else. To me that's my biggest issue. 

Recently I've had somethings in my head that has made this worse. 

For the most part I've burned all the bridges I've built and told all the people who think they care about me l, that I need a break as a lie. I just wanna run away, and start over someone else......it's harder everyday. 

I know it's a trivial thing to deal with compared to the world ar large.....but I'm scared. 

I don't see a way out, and as much as I am prideful and hate the thought of asking for help. 

I know its selfish and idiotic to want someone to save you but, here I am praying for someone to really connect no matter hard I push them away. 

(I'm just venting, no one needs to save me)",1.90357894736842,3.6171574631578975,3.4714385964912324,90.47873684210528,77.87719298245614,6.524912280701756,23.329824561403512,7.404127859558343,0.8440624561403514,1067,34,234,14,25,353,143,285,0.11,0.7440000000000001,0.146,0.6374,0,0,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,4,2,14,21,4,2,14,0,14,4,2,2,6,50,41,16,0,10,9,0,3,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,14,11,0,0,7,1,0,3,12,8,0,1,4,4,39,13,36,34,10,26,1,1,1,0,12,13,0,4,9,155,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.09941929447575867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21370868317799654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952431954023602,0.0,0.19143751524550606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22956569109343494,0.0,0.09010377496551032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387252096102634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503286710160432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851069058893816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729017733639127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302625688650888,0.07278244142601724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545134610108124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126365251113486,0.30175352441937525,0.10455733727101013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682874057326009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126705994681776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797024857968856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392042674517086,0.049772976697257255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640045719679044,0.06800508290695459,0.10328940553175668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489285265798727,0.1510841069440345,0.15715086792502614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903590725172447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22065025034500035,0.0,0.07063013243031226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596070727465788,0.06526635307614538,0.0,0.20118661889569026,0.10938001423299806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199874088283344,0.0,0.08118444347796656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3452872854669614,0.07843149995347272,0.0,0.0,0.2163316303561197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904681415160581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20305181903608088,0.06528000643344227,0.0,0.08088061653688039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734983532215556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802727785877549,0.08086687864251743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838600628048906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038234953053241,0.14474396332076292,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Watagewatama,2020/02/17,"29 Year old guy here, Can I ask for help? Thanks for Clicking here, I am not sure where to go and I feel like maybe you can point me in the right direction.   
This might be long, but I need I think I need real help so the more I share the better right?  
I grew up in an abusive home, My father was a drunk, He beat me and my mother more days than he didn't.  
I was always scared to come home but I also hated being at school because my teachers always treated me like I was a problem.  
I acted out and never paid much attention in class because it was always hard for me to follow the lessons and I liked to daydream of a better place.  
I was never offered special classes but I always felt learning was harder for me than other kids.   
Over the years I escaped into fantasy through Books, Video games, and Anime or Movies.  
I always felt a scene of dread anytime i was not able to escape with media.  
I used to lash out in anger as a teen and got in lots of fights in and out of my home.  
I used to cry as a response to any strong emotion i felt, even anger or loneliness.   
My first memory of wanting to end my life is almost my strongest memory, My face was pressed against a dirty tarp on my childhood homes kitchen floor (my dad had ripped up the floor and not gotten around to replacing it.) while my fathers boot pressed against my head, he was calling me stupid and a ""faggot""... I remember thinking that i wished my head would just pop so it would all be over.  
I was still in elementary school.  


I felt sad a lot after that, I had a hard time talking to people or making new friends.  
I spent a lot of time reading or doing more things to escape into my head over the next few years.  


I finally moved out at the age of 16.  
I ran away, I got a job, I dropped out of school.  


I lived with friends and on the streets until I got an apartment with a girl.   
I managed to survive and start a life away from my family.  
During these years I had nightmares of my abuse.  
I barely ever slept because or them.  
I never grew past my need to escape, While the abuse was gone I never stopped feeling sad or helpless.  


It must have been hard for the people i was close to, I would share my suicidal thoughts often, sometimes as little ""jokes"" and sometimes to vent...  
I realize now I must have made them feel trapped and guilty by sharing these thoughts.   


I am 29 now, and the last few years have gone by in a flash.  
I kind of just stopped paying attention.  
I live alone and have very few friends.  
I live across the country from where i grew up in order to distance myself from memories.  
I've lost interest in my hobbies.  
I've lost touch with myself.  
I don't feel sad anymore, No anger, Nothing.  
I cant cry, I sleep 10+ hours a day.  
Sometimes I go weeks without doing laundry, cleaning my apartment, or even brushing my teeth.  


I've gotten fat, I used to be so skinny.  
I have Gingivitis, I used to be proud of my teeth.  
My hair is a long frizzy unkempt mess, I used to love my hair.  


The worst part is I know I need to go to the dentist, to get a hair cut, to eat better...  
But i just can't do it, Its like someone else is making my decisions now and i am just along for the ride, I just get to watch myself rot into nothing.  


I can't motivate myself to do anything, i can barley peel myself out of bed in the morning.   


I used to think I was depressed, but Now maybe I feel like its more than that.  
I most of the time just feel like I am on auto pilot, like I am just sitting in the cockpit behind my eyes watching as my body preforms the bear minimum tasks to survive.   


I just want to feel something again, I don't need to be happy, I just want to be able to at least cry again.  


I am sitting here tonight next to piles of trash, having eaten a whole pizza to myself wanting to feel something.  
I want to cry, I want to feel bad for becoming what I am, I want to be angry.  
I cant.   


I am writing this in hope that someone can tell me what is wrong and what i need to do to fix this...  
But the truth is I could get the perfect answer, I could get a step by step guide on ""how to fix my life"" and somehow I know i would just keep living this Autopilot life... because I am not in control anymore.  


Sorry for the long nonsense post, reading it back its almost like reading something someone else in my head wrote.  
Like these are things that have happened to me and thoughts iv'e had, but it feels so detached from me.  


Anyways thanks for reading, I hope I can get some advice, I hope even more I can try to take it to heart.",2.8138755610586585,3.9904148613217783,3.8070331218077698,91.25323347778982,74.27627302275191,6.227698498684415,25.645085900015477,6.3317336037704965,0.7355777557653611,3459,115,754,22,70,1115,360,923,0.172,0.6970000000000001,0.131,-0.9940000000000001,1,2,3,0,3,1,114.0,0,1,2,15,37,56,7,2,45,0,76,28,17,12,11,158,158,46,1,26,29,4,23,9,3,7,6,0,7,3,29,36,7,4,31,10,3,16,17,21,0,1,42,28,135,35,134,99,19,122,0,7,4,1,31,54,0,20,56,519,164,15,0.08928594645750293,0.15868386960919675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04362459676078028,0.0,0.0,0.08940697804894479,0.04623665664870391,0.0,0.035700969561970566,0.1857326500017122,0.0,0.0,0.030358752668333506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854766703633543,0.0,0.0,0.03673736313942416,0.039741711033545256,0.04173515361047831,0.0,0.08388708581045244,0.034327690766627644,0.037275017907769964,0.10885576847660107,0.04930465651088145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844924584427652,0.0,0.04958827921924203,0.0,0.0,0.045585467050190065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03845596847757165,0.0,0.0,0.0500708905451085,0.07128756298272951,0.0,0.196152839277028,0.057582049023032995,0.0,0.038450927425934166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04568090674349738,0.07458695134283247,0.05021733610242243,0.0395404235442003,0.0,0.0,0.08845878833904673,0.04038212514385758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042085422037196285,0.0,0.2257282863571634,0.09567884698412364,0.17145702101074434,0.0489041950408052,0.0,0.03797329022250255,0.0,0.0,0.1034731511245505,0.0,0.11662055470626345,0.0,0.07611489145086371,0.0,0.10711519171274923,0.0,0.0,0.04420356225471657,0.03947763379050172,0.04752327513471999,0.1199740057181389,0.0440756936000972,0.18326628012314924,0.0,0.0,0.05290213822360604,0.05984648784348811,0.0,0.17912216845593812,0.1330216364865399,0.043964335988171926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044301262405761516,0.03968072582643031,0.0,0.046488786771935166,0.04906922114381874,0.036389981599696704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613060896414338,0.1962927154429954,0.0447439873050894,0.15768225303268893,0.11852287942501405,0.0,0.0,0.09746615777316746,0.1138615781737628,0.040292026316993336,0.04224226069097939,0.05959906257711992,0.0,0.08969973406343505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047359139725145466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04744841546155778,0.032817722009467164,0.19861319388035648,0.13772565242405602,0.04311646173230229,0.09495661698453234,0.0,0.0,0.08567227368126644,0.0,0.04684529064716195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483439895807553,0.0426167694045568,0.061899633124540464,0.0,0.046642405251549265,0.0,0.04220203958533544,0.0,0.04275562789553878,0.0,0.0,0.042717296214686035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17862021700529296,0.05081347712497713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050571786040650414,0.07624971042458435,0.0,0.0,0.044695404231628065,0.1355432168462633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04467521385011314,0.0,0.11347753903439176,0.10310502554948793,0.1324591261233146,0.049974153555536166,0.031598526227432484,0.0,0.03565193608816036,0.07464704919850326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048832166864496034,0.0,0.0420754739402117,0.0,0.0335659599814519,0.03588233083549994,0.039019926320624974,0.08220250355284346,0.0,0.0,0.05931761544788796,0.08581624392219453,0.0,0.10632460222538627,0.07809503009689699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03030964838059612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231343171303188,0.0,0.03683512830410077,0.18432107588909105,0.0,0.035809900301470694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049842285317415434,0.051337216015153175,0.04303423310430167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268523492489161,0.04881008305429381,0.0,0.1437430554097218
mentalhealth,VinX1997,2020/02/17,"Can Anxiety Cause Long-Term Memory Loss? Evening all,

I’ve been dealing with a ton of anxiety since late June, and it seems it’s been impairing how I perceive my past (months ago, 2 years ago, 4 years ago, etc)

For me, I’m able to remember most short term memories and tasks (what I did a couple days ago, what I did at work this morning, etc.) but I have difficult remembering long term memories (a couple months ago, 3 years ago, my childhood). I can remember the outcome of events such as vacations from years ago, but I can’t remember detail as well as I used to. Please keep in minds that I’m 22. It never used to be like this, but after a traumatic event that happened back in June I have difficult remembering what I did within this time span, and it seems I have trouble trying to remember memories from years ago. Some other symptoms besides memory and anxiety are derealization/depersonalization, I don’t feel like myself anymore 

Yes, I’ve scheduled to see a psychologist. However, I’d like to know if anyone else has experienced long-term memory issues too from anxiety. I do not think I’m depressed. 

Is it like this for anyone else? Any feedback would be appreciated!",6.240249839846253,6.942151439461888,7.18447469570788,71.92400224215248,65.99551569506727,11.214477898782832,32.968930172966054,11.062562989136584,3.8337279948750815,933,38,171,27,14,313,123,223,0.10300000000000001,0.762,0.135,0.8822,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,2,6,10,0,0,6,1,19,1,0,4,2,33,32,12,0,2,5,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,15,5,0,1,12,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,5,3,16,5,22,24,8,37,0,2,1,0,1,6,0,5,35,100,31,2,0.07544493731399621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5350190787345801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05130514449065498,0.0,0.23086068217333106,0.0,0.07482110515607975,0.10550570870422536,0.15460450789679586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801249985640571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750273288592155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16695677630459008,0.0,0.04865574316358854,0.07778041759464947,0.06498061395799534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604912848586847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16828209614724393,0.049830669557744456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038147227172683235,0.05389787829173015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06671570890603509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874491334573229,0.0,0.06705892677015657,0.0,0.0,0.041462564492207726,0.0,0.08510517544035122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14743434200254424,0.0,0.0,0.20029918622748946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617787975308589,0.0,0.12043885835468915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058187786689407814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202072943880711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281588548129801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5127864411911263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0601198471502927,0.1373644748339616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062408831772607976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841617721980414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483420694977581,0.0,0.0,0.04399254965990548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051222160100452906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032040501691164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783405921800896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492481290945594,0.0,0.0,0.053593918846863535,0.0,0.0,0.2429203303539028
mentalhealth,Atlashadow,2020/02/17,"Positive post I know that dealing with bad mental health can be hard. I have PTSD, depression, GAD and panic disorder.

Things can get really hard, and you might want to end it. I've been there. I know how hard it is.

You might think that no one is there for you, to help you get better, to listen to you. But you are wrong. I'm here. I'm just a stranger on reddit, but I really want to help people.

Few months ago, a complete stranger helped me. I was crying in a store, having a panic attack due to my PTSD and this person came up to me, asked me if I was alright and eventually called the ambulance to help me. I never got the chance to say thank you to this person, but they should know that they helped me a lot.

I want to help you. I want you to be happy.

PM me if you need to talk, or anything. I'll try my best to help you",0.6596524064171092,2.4553441363636352,2.4601470588235297,95.86426470588238,82.06818181818181,5.732085561497327,16.602941176470587,6.794906146795322,-0.3692723262032089,632,11,151,7,17,209,94,176,0.151,0.64,0.209,0.9286,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,11,2,2,5,11,1,2,7,1,15,1,0,1,1,28,33,11,0,8,7,0,3,0,0,3,1,2,0,2,8,6,0,0,4,0,1,1,2,6,0,1,5,5,30,5,19,23,3,10,0,1,0,0,28,3,0,6,5,100,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953307180881478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849903892769595,0.0,0.10053854355331897,0.12234612087658607,0.0,0.0,0.08979423069453331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11286014301969513,0.09511338070314182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981381564325324,0.12300097750036468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275718843999367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813135371933428,0.0,0.11087250316428304,0.09262695610894348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325403126655902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525151462763963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123739553277136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601226572483939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11448192838875353,0.2890132359817379,0.0,0.0,0.11431358460165154,0.0,0.0,0.5045884276005811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17730908839365075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142953638167836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837843315186983,0.2281730637123532,0.0,0.0,0.08584010035548771,0.0,0.0,0.07974205402305676,0.08294408494263199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728741779257691,0.0,0.0,0.2523579711903562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455703911993766,0.1878054635622906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299683085977412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25142491373785913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377900868107525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855228127126764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643929563958219,0.0,0.09901149592947064,0.0,0.0,0.07144704341868317,0.06890945586446526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301489608111264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537274888766656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758180422182934,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bentleygoldensdit,2020/02/17,Apps for memory loss and check ins I’m currently looking for good apps to record tasks and alerts etc. I need one that periodically check in on me so I can remember to actually put anything in it. I suffer brain trauma causing memory loss. Wondering if anyone had a good apps for this besides calendar.,4.349473684210526,6.670553771929827,6.245473684210527,70.5903157894737,72.6842105263158,10.174035087719297,28.94385964912281,10.355215969177356,3.6128343859649124,243,10,42,8,5,84,43,57,0.174,0.7340000000000001,0.09300000000000001,-0.6249,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,1,6,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,1,0,7,6,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,4,0,1,1,1,4,2,9,5,1,7,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,2,2,25,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.26401728638532673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891745021498944,0.0,0.22263918755463769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020227199448182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779288644949557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017342108818098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4538481717164424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271934417612095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20060902736058212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18333134420093464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719769754420484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3064798449073952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933993936811758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,joelthezombie15,2020/02/17,"""It will get better, it just takes time"" [Trigger warning] It will get better, it just takes time. 

Said when I was bullied, living in a house with fighting sisters, and a sick dad going in and out of the hospital.

It will get better, it just takes time. 

Said after the depression diagnosis. 

It will get better, it just takes time. 

Said after the social anxiety diagnosis.

It will get better, it just takes time. 

Said when we thought I had bipolar. 

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said when my anxiety and depression were so bad and I was so stressed and so severely bullied I got ulcers, and planned my suicide for the first time, then dropped out.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said when I was diagnosed with social anxiety.

It will get better, it just takes time. 

Said when I was locked in my house, never leaving, afraid to leave my room and see my own family. 

It will get better, it just takes time. 

Said when I had psychosis and thought people around me could read my mind and i spent all day every day worrying about what I was thinking. 

It will get better, it just takes time. 

When I made my first suicide attempt by drowning myself. 

It will get better, it just takes time.

After my next 3 suicide attempts also by drowning myself. 

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said before the borderline personality disorder diagnosis.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said when I was diagnosed with depersonalization.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said before my PTSD diagnosis.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said before my next 2 attempts at my life.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said after I started self harming by punching myself and scratching myself. 

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said after I got addicted to Xanax.

It will get better, it just takes time.

When I was so suicidal I admitted myself into a psych hospital for the first time. 

It will get better, it just takes time.

When I started cutting.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said before my next suicide attempt by over dosing on sleeping pills. Causing me to get carted around like an unwanted diseased animal to a hospital 2 hours away from my home where I only saw my family twice.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said when I developed an eating disorder.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said before I got sleep paralysis.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said by around 12 separate therapists

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said by a handful of psychiatrists.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said by people online.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said by my friends.

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said by my family. 

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said after losing 8 years of my life to being locked in my room because of my mental health. 

It will get better, it just takes time.

Said after 15 years of actively seeking help, and trying everything in my power to get better. 

It hasn't gotten better, even with time.",2.72714552979194,5.404040295254834,3.6050107715856896,85.5624501105505,80.14235500878735,6.201723453710527,21.47970406485629,7.4822170145007005,1.0023994897669932,2364,70,431,36,62,753,157,569,0.12,0.726,0.155,0.9527,1,0,0,0,2,4,98.0,1,0,0,41,51,42,2,2,13,0,42,16,3,3,2,63,141,28,7,2,29,2,2,1,1,29,12,24,3,2,60,22,1,0,4,1,1,1,2,9,0,4,43,28,47,33,50,67,2,85,0,3,2,0,35,18,0,0,66,278,107,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02170870212055357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015924853803635296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04570141956494456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05318182776663464,0.0,0.0,0.018709429938948804,0.0,0.0166269773060012,0.012139111485916185,0.0,0.08472479547351527,0.0,0.0,0.5459692489896077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02045669494811012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015899344365799758,0.0,0.0,0.025685176723669545,0.0,0.034303012236645496,0.040423655614562896,0.0,0.0,0.045645292907821614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02037652675636578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.013152707888421123,0.0,0.01677801953808537,0.0,0.017897009158706723,0.0,0.05631815057935216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050815350618420733,0.0,0.0,0.015385154562816078,0.0,0.3225241471951848,0.0,0.011317325864503031,0.0,0.04778004040514762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02116716588847643,0.0,0.0,0.01334762866753892,0.0,0.019974908109284845,0.0,0.01961082939134876,0.04595511186484435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04217113524743535,0.0,0.0,0.028131049836488068,0.009728751641767105,0.0,0.01758402403199885,0.0,0.0,0.02227816185482113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018842676658156456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020068168461805355,0.0,0.02010700255172251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015358552630176252,0.0,0.06353483932172807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015145147418846329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027611087880845733,0.017387738368269956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02327786708872154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01991893271445578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4546161680359116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015868516214657888,0.0,0.02077416919376696,0.022496636359258058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039855850299765655,0.04059870031919737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02818981762995139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02281089717262692,0.0,0.0,0.10891092423722118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4342026939102523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023121159219038404,0.0,0.012759794810482285,0.0,0.03161825886791581,0.3715759214661695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.013519989098972316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02022317038241956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02564733866641036
mentalhealth,trailrnglvr,2020/02/17,"Disassociative personality disorder Is it possible for a person suffering with DID to be 1) highly successful 2) aware, at least part of the time, that they have the disorder, and 3) be able to sense or know when a different personality is preparing to take over? Also, how long can the personality changes last?",6.768454545454548,8.667082890909093,8.652500000000002,57.51875000000001,65.54545454545455,13.5,35.56818181818181,12.602617957971056,5.686181818181819,249,12,41,11,4,88,45,55,0.14300000000000002,0.7909999999999999,0.066,-0.5813,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,5,0,7,0,0,1,0,5,9,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,8,6,2,7,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,4,30,3,1,0.19063119880868232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524477008141481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20166253154466854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19916902897266747,0.4369597386945723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20141232792046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476592142870718,0.15538987023625006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16870261213169674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20643501143509235,0.0,0.0,0.6658072392465166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149080337928382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14333093715871634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115858504083444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CRlNG3,2020/02/17,"A friend said I should say this So what I’m going to do is describe my personality and my character and have you guys who know more about this to tell me if I have any mental issues

Okay so I’m the type of person to put others  wrote myself. I will talk to people and help them through there problems and yet I feel scared to ask people for help with mine. I feel scared to ruin relationships by telling them about my actual mental state. I value their feeling over my own and most times I just ignore myself completely. I will bond with someone and feel like they don’t share the same feelings very easily and get discouraged to continue the relationship. Idk what else to say.

I’m never really anxious and I never feel the need to hurt myself in any way but my friend said I act everyday in a way that isn’t normal",3.123545296167247,5.0135928353658565,4.304181184668991,85.06817073170734,74.91463414634146,7.3686411149825775,21.470383275261323,8.192908349453996,1.0547871080139375,651,16,130,11,14,213,100,164,0.09300000000000001,0.778,0.129,0.5985,0,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,1,4,0,7,12,0,2,6,1,9,0,0,0,2,31,26,12,0,5,3,0,6,1,2,3,0,4,0,3,7,10,0,2,7,0,0,3,4,7,0,0,3,10,25,5,20,20,4,15,0,3,0,0,25,3,0,2,7,88,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.12295511247896945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17136486195783615,0.0,0.0,0.14234099616336976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11779039335678508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210568912914727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525451062135116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3822478846957608,0.09001243993148607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19469028094926086,0.0,0.06582834768284353,0.0,0.07160712435998852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475705814694685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16890656279594152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488263112737306,0.0,0.0,0.1315083637258938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924477760626173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155587786550412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25395112801849123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342534294295317,0.194353648794004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345052493796994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17470121716647355,0.2200318270556973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056232429926615,0.0,0.12666200787459314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071704618187847,0.0,0.0,0.270547724642097,0.0,0.0,0.23970442068470674,0.2003960947586704,0.2522903974342721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067570365642154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012717936327585,0.2202542495928536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346999286802622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396090290652106,0.0,0.20002145884747333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carrotheadginger,2020/02/17,"Been having a real negative view on life lately, need some advice I attempted suicide a few moths ago and went to a mental hospital for a couple weeks. That experience helped me have a better perspective on life itself, at least in terms of accepting ending your life is not the route to go. 

Since then, I’ve felt myself beginning to dread events of talking to people, even my own family. I usually sit in my room by myself when I’m not at work. I don’t do things with my family and don’t really care to better myself either by working out or starting a hobby. 

I just started taking Lexapro and have been on Latuda, a mood stabilizer for a few months. I personally don’t notice any change in my mood other than it not being well usually. 
 
I guess I’m just looking for advice on how I can approach life in general that will help my mood and outlook on life improve. Thanks",7.0750904392764875,6.307169093023255,8.054031007751936,71.35815245478038,64.46511627906978,11.132816537467699,31.901808785529717,10.504223727775694,3.2713661498708007,692,22,126,15,9,236,108,172,0.075,0.807,0.11800000000000001,0.7491,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,1,0,5,6,10,0,1,9,0,13,5,0,1,0,21,27,8,1,1,7,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,1,1,6,6,0,0,2,0,0,3,7,1,1,0,4,3,17,6,26,21,7,31,0,0,2,0,5,13,0,3,14,93,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563273756815897,0.11626148370475572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919027312862661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23199285566060085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13372182670281108,0.0,0.13874518380415682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512112408136502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616489037138004,0.0,0.0,0.08662700538436448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282952969973645,0.2472835644625387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592989821449413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453872289401227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14448262754569907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17582160422939214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14794917580959546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4631952268548801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013763162270633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217394867604196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468711060653288,0.0,0.0,0.0972501802180172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14932146566889878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092674599075687,0.11451996942591988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492837322041634,0.08402160527948893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849322824636597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856651500459343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346288688764336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986126528740083,0.10541786491275032,0.0,0.12075041132013455,0.0,0.0,0.08713392116162963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888986228422184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10520507293201592,0.0,0.11792459273123496,0.12158251104028155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19096560836410392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymous2879233,2020/02/17,"Long ramble post about my feeling lonely This my numerous attempt to write this post. I can't seem to find the right words to express what's going in my head, without rambling that is. Maybe that means I've got so much on my mind?

I feel really alone. I don't have many friends, like I count them on one hand I bet. Even then, I feel like we aren't that close. I'm 25, and my friends are similar in age. I know that as people get older and get more involved in life, they tend to become more distant, so I don't hold it against them at all. But it just seems to me that they are perfectly fine with moving on through life without me in it, and it just hurts.

It hurts so bad, like the worst pain I've felt. I'll try and text them throughout the day, with no response. I offer to hang out for go out somewhere and no one answers. We'll go weeks without saying any words, and I just don't know what to do. I don't socialize well and make friends rarely. 

I guess the whole point of this post is to ask how to deal with this loneliness? Or maybe I just want to get this off my chest and I don't have any other way of doing it? Idk I just feel like shit everyday from the heavy loneliness I feel..",1.8141652550348224,3.2408137667984214,2.774184076792775,96.63117259552044,77.3399209486166,6.083869753434971,21.92904197252023,6.655083550727371,0.17643700357613354,925,25,221,8,21,293,133,253,0.182,0.737,0.08199999999999999,-0.9794,0,3,0,0,0,0,28.0,2,0,5,2,12,17,1,0,5,0,16,7,4,2,2,50,40,16,0,1,10,0,7,4,3,1,3,1,0,0,19,15,0,1,13,0,1,5,12,7,1,2,2,8,31,10,35,37,6,30,0,3,0,0,18,14,1,5,11,137,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199783470629578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707441280067735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109396254625692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029029339269187,0.0,0.11942936990690008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697397398078549,0.11148501148075128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142379713992199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733878391775291,0.15450689944752924,0.1038289556936072,0.0,0.098835713514789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506402866503935,0.0,0.16949213748630435,0.0,0.18437109534476775,0.0,0.08648743519040722,0.0,0.1191256448757434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098026996425103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23152685496224765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885908102280868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15276142478790736,0.21132207590437696,0.0,0.0,0.09569828227858433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218261919192599,0.10963444947578682,0.2172773015394248,0.1177934362230898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10918804580237024,0.0,0.0,0.11493304613944574,0.07949350302248764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465535336686058,0.0,0.11506592145579375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496892489151209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222488813709334,0.0,0.3106974915286833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692756498302777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923488318956438,0.0,0.08599527822521788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19688863247971344,0.0,0.0,0.11100158706659516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102325604864827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341826237843056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378229769125862,0.08583451202138867,0.08674137763214483,0.0,0.09722859692162306,0.0,0.0,0.12073165399428605,0.0,0.3127220656900298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cadet_Seabear,2020/02/17,I don't wanna die I'm just tired of living I'm not depressed im just so bored with the repeating tasks of life and I want to see so badly what happens next. I figure there isnt all too much that'll change if I'm gone. Like I said before I'm tired with waiting for what happens after. Even if there is a God he sure isnt making taking it easy on me down here. Overall I'm scared of my thoughts as if I leave and there is nothing there it will have been a wasted life. Thank you for any advice you may have.,-0.17414454277286495,1.7147135840707968,1.7621460176991164,99.20097713864307,85.72566371681415,4.120648967551623,16.496312684365787,4.7782277997778095,-0.9891174041297934,397,8,96,1,12,131,75,113,0.165,0.6729999999999999,0.162,-0.3366,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,2,0,0,11,7,0,1,3,0,11,4,0,1,2,19,27,8,1,5,6,0,0,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,5,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,4,2,9,3,13,20,2,6,0,1,1,0,4,2,0,4,4,59,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18213239636633174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674758702061756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15562294760839052,0.0,0.0,0.15859915081916354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19716967603123808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16053236189198042,0.0,0.19343728120162956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310494763768325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296377080372557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013268238035896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19735386205252295,0.0,0.0,0.263297219591002,0.091057862122378,0.0,0.16458058493222072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441284154306145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370137673855132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19822161677585048,0.0,0.0,0.17884058153345989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17729397131272445,0.0,0.1866030103133657,0.0,0.148524005418909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17566481906990197,0.0,0.14013765585689922,0.0,0.0,0.17159744812645794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796816501019153,0.0,0.4284422352993926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993417784987414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GenaVeronica,2020/02/17,Deteriorating I can feel myself going crazy but I feel like I have no control over it. I really think this is the worst state my mental health has ever been in and that I won't get better. It's just scary & sad to be dealing with. I really don't like being mentally ill :(,2.035789473684212,3.7822059122807055,4.589333333333332,82.46400000000001,77.59649122807018,7.3670175438596495,18.417543859649122,8.238735603445708,0.7175712280701751,215,4,45,4,5,76,47,57,0.391,0.522,0.087,-0.9743,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,1,1,9,14,2,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,2,8,3,4,10,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,32,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758925107562988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252003688828715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28559024434507635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625133122908658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303282578251325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25749810220875097,0.18190839022681385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303415358356874,0.0,0.14471262784356925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27066077591083776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487996250303921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5132161835551808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262461932147402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16315722105000224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ahsiaxx,2020/02/17,"sharing this with all of you first After years and years of self harm, suicidal thoughts, intrusive thoughts, panic attacks, and my mental health affecting how I function as a student, worker, and organizer, I am now finally taking the step of seeking professional help. For years, I’ve been dreading asking for help, thinking they would not validate how I’m feeling to the point that even I would question myself. Am I just being lazy? Is this depression? Am I having a panic attack? This will pass away in a few months anyway so I just have to handle it, those kind of thoughts hindered me to reach out. But last night, I filled out an intake form and in a few days I will hand it in. I am happy and proud of myself. I just want to share this ❤️",4.228288401253916,5.757902600000001,4.931598746081509,83.18373040752353,71.27586206896551,7.479623824451412,27.66457680250784,8.00094639256281,1.7717586206896554,587,21,111,8,11,189,95,145,0.19899999999999998,0.654,0.147,-0.9109,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,3,9,12,2,3,7,0,13,2,1,3,1,26,22,10,1,3,5,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,8,8,0,0,6,0,0,3,1,7,0,1,4,2,16,5,20,13,4,21,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,1,11,85,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470870431305433,0.35219425315008224,0.14543125454294276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982739950574704,0.0,0.13332127489870396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223800591956547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826698842519693,0.0,0.0,0.16956599143919412,0.0,0.13166515877450347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16477791440862286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16453561120380505,0.0,0.0,0.2075063097729633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16119102283988207,0.0,0.12617533737664002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15599293646589052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12355271184088196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14526088228775516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3632278103835928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463275425977791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734013630340027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16148078791259154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16931624744244228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638357973409336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918383259427256,0.0,0.3686603281309979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129975148405432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21991819258895645,0.0,0.0,0.29904101702577185
mentalhealth,jimmietheunpop,2020/02/17,"I hate being sad all the time... I’m so unhappy it’s getting tiring and exhausting. I feel like I never had an happy moment in my life or usually it’s temporary. I’ve been sad for a long time, but as I’m getting older it’s getting worse. I’ve isolated myself, I’m more quiet, I hang out myself, I like my own company, I have dark thoughts, I cry a lot more now, I hate myself even more. I don’t like talking about my feelings because no on really listens or understands or cares enough for what I’m going through. I’ve been pretty obvious about my state and the signs become obvious. But I want to find happiness again, but I don’t enjoy doing things anymore or things I used to like. I’m seventeen and feel like my teenage life is being wasted because I’m sad. I can’t even try or pretend to be happy anymore. It’s draining, I even miss school because I hate seeing people or doing things or even being talked to. I don’t enjoy life and often imagine how life would be if I can just be happy. Is it my fault?",1.524241706161142,3.465055677725122,3.8477227488151686,86.26703436018957,79.9004739336493,6.494881516587678,23.82014218009479,7.554174236665415,1.2309505213270149,792,28,160,12,20,274,106,211,0.247,0.596,0.156,-0.9645,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,12,21,3,0,5,0,20,6,0,2,4,35,44,18,0,3,12,0,3,5,0,1,6,2,0,0,9,5,0,0,7,1,0,2,6,9,0,0,4,6,26,12,13,33,7,15,0,4,1,0,3,3,0,10,14,107,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21077851269276732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19433987714304468,0.11736460729029563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834726254920488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673035865052665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980320476925502,0.0,0.2807559282626467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16119681318603055,0.15183569662501234,0.0,0.0,0.09712698569842483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16656186137781515,0.0,0.06039452779409425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4524968567302868,0.0,0.3147528146320915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002407974406124,0.25958577514916525,0.0,0.0,0.09404379615112576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034521519529434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196039813694724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367281963998402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811271429312863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807797314386428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754884387383176,0.08468180160678578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082831380194222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117991220839868,0.0,0.0,0.0843648860544258,0.12393139833385786,0.12213938166850676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07214896585904665,0.0,0.0,0.11062868893530606,0.0,0.09178139338386818,0.11703913905078125,0.0,0.06267959318920263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082961249091354,0.07548970628243154,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlackDeath108,2020/02/17,"Imagining a very harsh and strong screaming sounds So, imagine yourself sitting reading something or doing anything and suddenly you unwillingly starts imagining someone who is screaming while he or she is angry.. and I cant control it till it stops.. sometimes it makes me feel uncomfortable, sometimes very nervous. 

It is occurring to me once or twice a month.

it is worth mentioning that i am a person who hates living with noises, loud sounds. alot.. and I mean literally ALOT.

A strange thing to post since I suffered or suffering no mental health issues whatsoever.. so I said let me give it a try here in Reddit perhaps someone knows what the hell is this strange thing?

Thanks in advance.",4.668086303939962,7.746531105691059,4.6008130081300855,78.92909943714822,75.34146341463416,7.036647904940589,33.038774233896184,8.139509932561175,2.9985952470293937,558,29,88,10,13,172,85,123,0.23800000000000002,0.701,0.06,-0.9706,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,3,3,9,2,1,8,0,9,1,0,2,0,20,18,12,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,0,1,13,5,0,2,6,1,1,1,2,7,0,1,1,7,10,2,6,16,2,11,1,2,0,0,9,2,1,6,6,60,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14663394919922584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998535494419408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009745731860774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17093464164944852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17592424888387356,0.0,0.18940603830686573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185982494536458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979277371261148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18220980934646566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734370614097107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894220444031398,0.0,0.0,0.19409950940850584,0.0,0.0,0.1795720931395285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422283571357958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897649323242993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555873212692692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17065532289353386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17823671589402604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16949806402914128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473993648734499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019570680830124,0.13717820938164624,0.3524659567468422,0.0,0.12612273428605056,0.0,0.0,0.14897356103790593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16405202632904273,0.0,0.0,0.2367610374537392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12097829188282876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940483404860473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amberaven91,2020/02/17,"Has anyone had EMDR therapy before? I've just started EMDR therapy after a diagnosis of PTSD and BPD/EUPD. The waiting list in my area for DBT is 3 years, so I've been referred for EMDR in the meantime. So far it's been incredibly difficult and I'm hoping it'll be worth it. 

Basically I was wondering what other people's experiences were, and whether you found it helpful.",5.161643835616438,6.255895301369865,7.561534246575345,66.85435616438359,68.58904109589041,10.223561643835618,33.77808219178082,10.355215969177356,3.934339178082192,299,14,50,8,5,108,55,73,0.04,0.851,0.10800000000000001,0.5729,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,9,0,0,0,0,10,15,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,6,0,3,1,6,7,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,3,33,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772371741393428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156904548126591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3192457001070331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479493712035818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27792470140717385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990044542933772,0.0,0.0,0.2517600849015316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17572919679557006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29630131954726696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17941248933409368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5797466107298942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748852453119945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16323102672527548
mentalhealth,casaroads,2020/02/17,"I am the opposite of lonely and I need some advice Hi! First time poster here. 
I live in a place where all of the employees of a resort live together in a staff  accommodation. There are about 40 people that live here and I have lived here for about 5months. I have been drinking almost everyday since being here and doing at least one drug once a week (limed to coke, molly, shrooms, LSD) I am always with people and it’s becoming overwhelming for me, but I can’t stay away. I am on antidepressants (cipralex) for anxiety and depression and I feel as though my brain can’t handle all of this substance but I am easily influenced by others. 

So I’m wondering if anyone else has experienced this and what you did. I love the place I’m living as it’s amazing and these people are like family, therefore do not want to just get up and leave. But I feel as though my social battery has drained and I don’t want anyone thinking I’m staying away on purpose. Any advice on how to cope with something like this would be greatly appreciated",3.6732572431957853,5.654988084577115,4.6958033362598774,82.4550131694469,73.6268656716418,7.913491366695932,25.753877670471176,8.671277953709913,1.894779689786363,819,28,157,16,17,267,123,201,0.078,0.7959999999999999,0.126,0.9405,1,2,3,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,1,13,8,0,1,7,0,20,5,1,3,2,33,32,21,0,5,6,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,12,2,0,4,1,0,0,4,3,0,2,2,3,17,5,27,27,4,18,0,3,0,1,4,12,0,4,6,112,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23058405722426376,0.0,0.0,0.11814334844018876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817165355419767,0.0,0.0,0.08023276869375784,0.0,0.09025699029397444,0.0,0.0,0.1649934954160196,0.12088795231202673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216986061895706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030341346958518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317085116980099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161894330538028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557883091005368,0.13682330528748934,0.0,0.09856000475447972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122426433585432,0.0,0.1193119202543758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10035663336527413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061641465266425215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007713264188522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12492740206805016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528147495580228,0.0,0.5209075893571947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648463930687528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874832079906939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564848746224133,0.07994861610647168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24538453544025404,0.0,0.2465351164293071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09759710091005294,0.0,0.0,0.12026923459512735,0.0,0.09082939777369713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25150924649472456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559900900186853,0.23183621434214846,0.0,0.06879707865854975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917935118611166,0.0,0.09463917965349476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794798180052994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381203360640872,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThatTubaGuy03,2020/02/17,"How can I as a 17 year old brother help my 17 year old sister? I was in my room tonight, and I heard my parents confront my sister about how distant she has been. After a few minutes, she burst into tears and said ""I hate life!"" How can I best be supportive without pushing too much?",2.0731034482758623,3.7486980344827607,3.3788275862068997,91.49893103448278,77.27586206896551,5.329655172413793,27.11724137931035,5.6839178017228535,0.8172786206896547,218,9,46,1,5,71,41,58,0.11599999999999999,0.73,0.155,0.5349,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,2,0,2,0,6,1,0,3,0,7,10,6,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,4,2,11,2,6,5,3,10,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,6,34,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.280649075172766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640296790017335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17925127983309225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18889222991729904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965902723243504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5612411758977197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969470277048697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543851670304432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034740043089465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25779094608710784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34442959081168983
mentalhealth,tkl93,2020/02/17,"I want to be back to normal... My life has been rough, I'll just give a little back story because I don't have time.. I had multiple dads growing up, my stepdad used to hit me for little to no reason. My mom wasn't really around in my early teens, so I was flunking school. She sent me to live with my real father I had just met at 14, he had cancer so it was an emotional rollercoaster, and he treated me like absolute shit. I turn 18, and I decide I was put through hell so I'm going to have fun, I made some friends, as always they were outsiders and got into some bad stuff. It started with Molly and ecstacy, then graduated to Dilaudid (like morphine), then heroin and shrooms. Despite my friends being bad for me I've never in my life had a closer connection with the few people I did back then, we were like blood brothers, I was very much dependent on their friendship to be happy. I overdosed ~4 years ago and have since been clean.. I've been absolutely miserable because I had to move far away to get clean, I haven't been able to make new friends and I'm always, constantly uptight, unhappy, and miss my old friends like crazy, but it's not a the same because I can't see them, and talking on Facebook just isn't the same. I just want to feel that happiness again, those 3 or so years I had of complete happiness, I wasn't a nervous wreck, and I had a little group of friends. I'm honestly really unhappy with my life, and all I do is think about the past.",4.929120059656974,4.984358765100673,5.874049217002237,82.43580909768829,68.73154362416108,9.172557792692023,30.985085756897842,8.998388855275968,2.3867130499627143,1144,43,238,19,18,379,162,298,0.099,0.728,0.17300000000000001,0.9663,0,0,0,0,1,0,41.0,1,0,3,0,14,24,2,3,10,0,33,6,2,5,2,44,54,21,0,3,7,4,2,4,5,0,4,0,2,0,6,18,0,1,4,0,0,5,9,9,0,0,24,3,38,15,32,26,7,37,1,3,1,0,21,14,2,4,22,157,44,2,0.10341016073279936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166686807756358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17209107548989275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205696727942413,0.0,0.0,0.0971572500627959,0.2385480914257248,0.172686329533176,0.189113622492912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842358606769938,0.11174964661951736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632251219728502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052287284394177104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3994721683108298,0.0,0.0540275408859017,0.0992004490108465,0.05877037743253913,0.0,0.08270655223598332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302461170125708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21912496418206265,0.20208392434026454,0.3109324436347605,0.09131306648903237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784919443845827,0.06902708528220157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111273043091955,0.0,0.10990863543641168,0.07601836666420073,0.0,0.07975629099132699,0.09987417762523584,0.0,0.0,0.10132000146208277,0.0,0.0,0.1085115682276702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871669952304192,0.0716915848986013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395577361451072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177034022792676,0.1324943938678632,0.10632286817126686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465660346658744,0.08240450954539724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10614904394827826,0.08554195356928693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319424401585167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183798933748627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311717008975536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626105547829672,0.0,0.0,0.060299296325779066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248055990210708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931317666468691,0.0,0.0853242125927032,0.12198798413016695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318550615324892
mentalhealth,Mifkko,2020/02/17,"Mental, Monday, Myself. #SelfCare",10.185,7.6245875,8.790000000000003,35.605000000000025,174.0,0.8,27.0,3.1291,2.7019,26,1,0,0,2,8,4,4,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,roary-wilder,2020/02/17,"Stress induced psychosis?? Sorry if this is the wrong place to post this, I just desperately need help. I'm female-ish, just turned 22,and my boyfriend says I tried to stab him. I have no memory of this; from my perspective it seemed like he attacked me. His side of the story says he was defending himself.

We went into the kitchen. We were fighting. He had me by the shirt front, screaming in my face, and then I blacked out. My memory goes from standing upright, to my head slamming into the kitchen floor with his hands on my wrist and neck. My mind says he handed me the knife and told me to kill myself, and then I threw it away, but according to him I grabbed it and went for his neck. I don't remember doing this!!! 

I'm terrified. I don't know what happened. He was screaming at me all night after I came home later than expected. He told me to give up, to kill myself, that I was a coward and too weak to fight for myself. When we got to the kitchen I was at a breaking point. Could he have driven me to a point of a memory break and violence? Because that isn't me! That isn't me at all! IIm not a violent person, and I never want to hurt him. I'm afraid of myself at this point. Please help.",1.5337176870748337,3.5962852204081663,2.840229591836735,92.88170493197279,80.46938775510205,6.042517006802722,21.636904761904763,7.1686216300943375,0.5524455782312923,929,28,203,12,24,300,129,245,0.204,0.73,0.067,-0.9879,0,0,0,0,3,2,38.0,3,0,0,1,4,14,6,2,12,0,15,12,8,1,3,33,33,13,2,5,5,0,3,1,0,0,1,5,4,1,12,16,3,0,4,0,0,6,7,13,0,0,14,9,42,1,34,18,2,34,0,1,1,0,28,17,0,2,8,136,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15628956531503782,0.12907301781583222,0.0,0.0,0.08374556350475669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15712610395100546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096867390018526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178739943997836,0.0,0.0,0.1098753235949084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148466668831218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099149833876534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841658156797011,0.0,0.13780332584543686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706811488791824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039811968708708,0.0,0.07550044674595148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06711692115052037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387146218270763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186551785457447,0.10595591334043164,0.0,0.0,0.1289218091832844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995490357045233,0.14353284408066425,0.1508019686692232,0.3896054717817176,0.0,0.13157204992333507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15562474193828765,0.0,0.0,0.3277502333776458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12506557835968155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15378564530849725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157368308214901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625449251739571,0.0,0.0932719916927388,0.14942997360254498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103027431701576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547052441735889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15020344690229112,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,christina_aidi,2020/02/17,"It is really hard for me to consciously recognize when I am uncomfortable. I don’t shout them from the rooftop, but **I have no shame in talking about my feelings.**

**It’s really hard for me to *actualize* my feelings of discomfort.** That means it's hard for me to consciously recognize when I feel uncomfortable. *I would really like to hone this skill.*

I’m not sure if this is alexithymia, but I think it’s related.

EXAMPLE: My friends and I were in the cafeteria once, a janitor came by, and he put his dustpan on the table. He collected some trash and moved on. It grossed me out but I didn’t *actualize* that. Someone else said “wait did he just put that dustpan on the table?” THEN I actualized my discomfort. “Yes! I thought that was weird too.”

**PROBLEM: It hurts my decision making when I fail to identify that I am uncomfortable.** “Listen to your gut when it tells you something is wrong” is hard advice to follow if you don’t know what your gut is saying.

Sometimes I don’t realize that I am uncomfortable, disappointed, ignored, scared, even bored, until I have already made a decision. **After I actualize the feeling, I have no issue speaking up.**

This guy in my bio lab used to ask me all kinds of weirdly personal questions, which made me uncomfortable, but I would just answer them. Say he asked what I did over the weekend. If I told him I watched a movie with my friends, he would ask my friends' names, majors, how I met them, how old they are, and so on. That always felt intrusive but I never actualized that. **One day, another person said “yeah he does that a lot, it’s really weird.” THEN I realized “yes! Oh my God I hate it!! It's weird and I don’t need to answer all his questions.” *UNTIL I ACTUALIZED THAT DISCOMFORT, THANKS TO SOMEONE ELSE, I DID NOT REALIZE I WAS UNCOMFORTABLE, AND I DID NOT KNOW BETTER THAN TO ANSWER THAT GUY'S QUESTIONS*.**

~~By the way, for super trivial things, I can easily identify how I feel. I can easily identify that I don’t like how something tastes…~~ Nope, that’s not true. It took me 21 years to realize I hate eating garbanzo beans. For some trivial things, I can identify how I feel easily. Of course, having the back of your seat kicked on a plane is irritating, and I know this because so many people complain about it.

**This might have something to do with the fact that I come from a home in which feelings usually weren’t expressed openly and freely.**

**If I took a multiple choice test on how I feel, I would get 100%. If I took a short answer test, I might get a B-. My therapist kind of goes through a multiple choice test sometimes with me to get answers.**

""Does Activity X make you scared? Does it make you bored? ...""

""I guess it does scare me a bit.""

""What about it scares you? Is it the other people there? Is it Aspect B? ...""

**If this is something you have experience with, do you have any advice?**

People sometimes compliment me for not complaining. It's not because I'm always really happy. It's because I don't know what I'm unhappy about.

I don't know if this is important, but it's really easy for me to know when I'm happy. I easily identify which activities make me happy, and I instantly know that I want to do them again. The issue is that not everything that doesn't make you happy is bad.",0.4976970505682629,2.9228177914691926,2.633336400865044,87.12893802052179,97.783570300158,6.5024862344514505,21.31150784521235,7.632248930610904,1.5033552017668987,2534,96,498,64,103,849,240,633,0.177,0.6829999999999999,0.139,-0.9681,1,0,4,0,0,0,142.0,0,11,5,4,24,43,2,8,22,3,52,4,2,14,6,110,107,39,0,14,22,0,13,2,3,6,0,7,1,4,54,17,2,2,35,1,0,9,21,26,0,1,21,21,91,17,58,80,7,43,0,3,1,0,52,15,0,16,20,338,145,5,0.0,0.0,0.3317901538347094,0.0,0.0,0.11074775443963772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253292488705542,0.0,0.09430218473586134,0.0,0.0,0.03853518353468167,0.05941979748380069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15892666821309798,0.0,0.0,0.04357306370474172,0.04731418553413545,0.10363017206805676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050116940771800435,0.06186517418767915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481141411111369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04881319794251295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036545223903749716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19835704886447064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0579840069393727,0.09467522894267172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03742770858804461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509282232276543,0.05543073973212378,0.0,0.0,0.22921840139540786,0.0,0.054408755237254386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313412613837565,0.0,0.08881776920057376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06242457136572624,0.11221754747183656,0.0,0.2412902993074301,0.2030483215279044,0.11189293320800817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056841149832380825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060662692301680525,0.0,0.0,0.11829026965329414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180189416958376,0.21799710026579866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05536880837961497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04817585733741443,0.0,0.10723848152988796,0.18912674377592975,0.057450967191674175,0.0,0.061726463462945476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022846664953543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06022755342475425,0.0,0.04201751392864995,0.04370472126750678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05946199083162086,0.060348004986512715,0.03839870722604621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178563106285832,0.09895805642056138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542222161668492,0.0,0.11393102797281007,0.19043844681924815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21781218063908897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780569294809657,0.09012699806636992,0.2269323280885796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602673385009293,0.1744986528840223,0.16813394119876632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05340753384397123,0.0,0.0,0.04554641027266093,0.049529044842591664,0.052170927376790514,0.0,0.0657942088282652,0.07529344907863461,0.03630962428888119,0.0,0.04498689505647372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414729774476728,0.18887579937324755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048941687773196525,0.0624101769376042,0.0,0.03342338753549705,0.044979253853445526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16101710809783595,0.061955954824263776,0.0,0.036491387393707504
mentalhealth,Jtv08,2020/02/17,"What can i do to help me with my little but frequent anxiety situations So for probably a year now I've been having little anxiety attacks and i start thinking about things in the future (near or not) and it gets me tired and leaves with more worries than needed, and I don't know how to stop it or at least stop thinking about stuff during my anxiety attacks.

Do you have any advices, people say that i should just calm down and think about other things but it doesn't work for me, I can't just avoid it",5.586764705882351,5.5746525784313725,5.847843137254902,83.41529411764708,67.33333333333334,8.760784313725491,28.764705882352942,8.344100000000001,1.8129882352941171,401,12,82,5,6,128,68,102,0.226,0.711,0.063,-0.9537,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,1,8,4,2,1,2,0,10,1,0,1,0,24,17,11,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,10,7,0,3,4,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,1,11,1,14,15,2,13,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,2,7,64,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16405707628361327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416880778739498,0.0,0.3852989175410287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3819910331972272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771394424387363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253100945877777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922662162416395,0.0,0.0,0.17776792183909124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3365334368038652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448596403094447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639159542409915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18101040816696168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13351035307037762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887118415202632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883116894284212,0.0,0.0,0.28072183020647,0.0,0.0,0.19219026438769432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22307311207619127,0.3227253228888026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929612245870268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222361850984527,0.17049723469795455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811362010247076
mentalhealth,CaramelKing22,2020/02/17,"They don't believe me I had a pretty crap life growing up, no dad, mental mum. Poor family and bad health. (I am Male, 17.) But I've managed to pull through that, won multiple awards in public speaking, volunteer as a military cadet and had a great paying job directly out of school. But recently I've started to hate my academic studies, on the journey to work I think about jumping in-front a train some days. But i'm fine once I am there. At home I only end up in arguments, stay in my room and never leave, and of course contemplate if its worth it all. I realized this wan't right so turned to my doctor, who said, and i'm quoting. ""Your probably not depressed, just having a bit of a bad time at the moment, you will be fine."" . So I got a second opinion from another doctor in the same surgery and received a very similar answer. My grand-parents who I live with refuse to listen to me when I try explain i'm not happy and tell me if I drop out of college i'm getting kicked out the house. So i'm screwed no matter what, what do I do???",2.3094835680751156,3.9484395023474192,3.9827464788732416,87.58473004694838,76.51173708920187,7.174647887323943,26.387323943661972,7.984000788550335,1.5776647887323945,806,31,169,13,18,270,138,213,0.157,0.7340000000000001,0.11,-0.9094,2,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,2,1,3,7,12,3,0,12,0,10,6,1,0,2,30,25,17,0,2,8,2,0,0,0,1,4,3,2,1,8,11,0,1,4,0,3,5,6,6,0,1,5,3,21,6,27,18,4,29,0,1,0,1,16,14,2,4,8,105,29,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16659094675469086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653026532178129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17899412745110696,0.0,0.0,0.1734468708325546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024591753471996,0.0,0.1368360585369361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3252240623024765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071326942871495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497702047506216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300396437061247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706430095549934,0.17515673315960778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16912199766124306,0.0,0.15685302262569378,0.0,0.1688733065536661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936138065403374,0.0,0.0,0.18331674005268708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576557586937755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16822230920940878,0.0,0.0,0.11221585893319716,0.0,0.0,0.14028672031239564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010541904743406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225317352451219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16919329434269395,0.0,0.12082917176246465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162974784800824,0.17129068359333186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15686674752028007,0.0,0.0,0.1356756590485459,0.15112347411370006,0.0,0.0,0.1607867551039467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11245028596167378,0.16933621260215692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388609658999988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017986419129231,0.0,0.0,0.0926394309592578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078635314591619,0.1728069098354488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310858829749808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566057100148144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cntthinkofgoodusernm,2020/02/17,"Feeling good at school, feeling bad at home Hi, I'm a 20 y/o college student who goes to a university 3hrs from my home. I'll start saying I always feel good at school because I have great friends and a bf who loves me and have goals in my career. 
But as soon as I go back to my childhood home I get super depressed. Like I'm just here for a 3day weekend and I already feel no motivation to do my assignments or even fucking eat. Everything seems hopeless
I feel frustrated because my family dosnt try to reach out to me at all while I'm at school so if I want any relationship with them at all then I have to come here to see them. I also am not in good financial standing so for my summer break it makes most sense to live at home rent free and work
 

Honestly I can see some obvious reason why I feel this way like having no friends/nothing to do here(small town) and that my mother is a hoarder, and kinda neglectful. I was also starting to become an alcoholic in highschool but i easily stopped once I went to college.

Idk is there some way I can be not depressed in this situation and just get the good money? Or should I just fucking leave and pay rent somewhere. 

Sorry this turned into more of just a rant then anything",4.723185483870967,5.26443446370968,5.633225806451616,82.28233870967746,69.28225806451613,8.458064516129033,30.822580645161292,8.472884824447931,2.2251080645161294,969,38,195,14,16,319,143,248,0.12,0.737,0.14300000000000002,0.39299999999999996,2,0,1,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,2,4,14,20,3,0,8,0,14,5,0,3,3,44,39,22,0,3,11,1,6,2,2,1,1,1,6,0,7,12,2,2,9,1,5,3,4,8,0,0,2,9,27,13,31,35,6,32,0,4,2,3,11,14,2,8,13,127,34,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11000934452578004,0.0,0.0,0.11359456833867615,0.16463885502059425,0.08565260610959953,0.0,0.0,0.07000132406056643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470914765006071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915291619052947,0.08594887400123392,0.12550001655602985,0.11368685913480207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867191418800775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17732058102503653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533120353352143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798953365197198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251397634526264,0.0,0.09704072161450887,0.0,0.3122910699701981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952959137868766,0.19032891993912532,0.10756164235471258,0.0,0.058501999302542775,0.3453578160332036,0.0,0.11348943409505333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4130205577778696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899640755997776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058054854573437,0.0,0.09089608039673293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290550313731147,0.0,0.06871186933708702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877172258172806,0.0,0.0,0.10962553868901538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583733900194332,0.0,0.1105168161672498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186037563012892,0.0,0.31253605015741714,0.16405640972732916,0.09371082776126986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570654917344834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152305878937689,0.14571999702675725,0.0,0.0,0.08606072090965637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988809921248977,0.11196691129806126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06071545967773869,0.16341467906407006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954244948118279,0.09288547320090317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494004091814073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,annon225544,2020/02/17,"A chat I feel like I've got the world on my shoulders again, nothing seems to be going right and everything is so difficult. I feel like, I'm passively taking it out on the people around me. Through sly and unneeded comments (nothing rude or obscene), just making shitty comments. I can't get any help because I desperately want to go in the RAF and need to be 4 years clear of any ""episodes"" and I've already had a handful. I haven't felt this way for a while, not suicidal, but have a lack of energy or drive to do anything or be me. I'm not having negative thoughts as such but feel like the way I'm going, bad depression is only a few slip ups away. What should I do?",5.0793478260869565,4.8103821159420335,6.10126811594203,82.04364130434786,68.42028985507247,9.508695652173913,32.46739130434783,9.188382445141503,2.614634782608696,524,21,111,9,8,175,90,138,0.166,0.705,0.129,-0.7436,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,1,0,9,0,13,2,2,1,1,27,31,12,1,5,8,0,5,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,6,1,0,4,5,4,0,0,4,5,9,3,16,23,2,18,0,1,0,0,4,9,0,4,6,69,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18588964174385295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291046348698277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13862065184445635,0.14995692173051314,0.0,0.0,0.15826506753145042,0.0,0.1406493781352498,0.10268604149669104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14508642342071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15139271331924128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555213509130413,0.3610238461135539,0.16173918039256546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800858815311109,0.0,0.2872034072762837,0.0,0.13472548951788085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290901750325913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468896498619064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244221410780883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490413050838955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232661630510253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12811442074071872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167825717389117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14385605904665644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533512777488264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18425782972075894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266540343343415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373111557344255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935664365710226,0.2674168016232871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108476789492964
mentalhealth,TheOneTruePadopoulos,2020/02/17,"What do you guys do when you dont want do do anything, but you also cant stop thinking? I tend to either infinitely scroll through the internets or just mindnumbingly play whatever game im already playing that im able to autopilot. Im really not enjoying any of those activities, cose I dont feel like doing (and enjoying) them, but I also cant 100% stop and just be there with me thoughts.",5.149615384615384,5.746596782051284,6.681179487179487,74.94715384615388,68.35897435897436,10.855384615384617,33.54871794871795,10.793553405168565,3.736653333333333,311,14,61,9,5,107,53,78,0.1,0.774,0.126,0.2747,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,3,1,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,10,0,0,0,0,16,15,8,0,1,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,2,3,3,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,1,8,5,5,13,1,4,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,5,41,11,0,0.18734735391228524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20674246372928198,0.2996432224738397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12740262507486394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15417090924072233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4391394069898268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472845129619044,0.13384098706870792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18550333508218544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6071018735778283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152845384116766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001951221937883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31326155345972856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004461963239788,0.0,0.14873287210384936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050232334003043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GraveTesting_135,2020/02/17,"A blanket Everything I feel seems to be under a really heavy blanket. I can 'feel' somethings but its no where as profound as it used to be. I cant laugh or cry, be upset when something or someone hurts me or even indulge in little moments  of a happy day or event. It just is. Life just is.",2.154,3.685033066666669,4.036666666666669,87.495,76.66666666666666,6.133333333333334,27.0,6.742157984588678,1.2148999999999996,224,9,46,2,5,76,44,60,0.20600000000000002,0.679,0.115,-0.7392,0,0,2,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,3,0,7,1,0,1,0,11,11,8,0,0,7,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,4,2,7,8,0,8,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,5,4,35,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30768308264262,0.1806450767022892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850072476361137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517410432482521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832598304138519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981778463083701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998590659251662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978470193177747,0.0,0.2807396108971735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794429562208079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25499781196560106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373327462366496,0.43127827890317016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419214878807033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Reiss20,2020/02/17,Im kinda confused I wouldnt say i have depression or anxiety because i feel happy and normal 99% of the time but on ocassions i'll just think about certain Past events and how lifes gone and its really nothing serious compared to others and i'll just sit there and cry but the problem is sometimes these emotional outbursts lead to self harm and i dont know if its normal and people go through this often or i need help for it these outbursts tend to happen around once every month,4.741082706766914,6.219309484210527,5.104962406015041,82.63473684210527,69.94736842105263,7.533834586466164,29.360902255639097,7.957251820313856,2.0165639097744363,391,15,71,5,7,124,70,95,0.14800000000000002,0.715,0.13699999999999998,-0.4774,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,1,2,0,4,1,0,2,1,29,12,13,0,6,7,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,7,8,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,1,2,5,2,9,10,0,10,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,6,4,44,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15237180475478942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731202124794046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141800032711215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21878937457156067,0.0,0.0,0.17155304800529256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23343694027663964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22405017636235827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678173550121071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071116131119452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131983240381743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17613381154050964,0.2120303266094049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335058487436814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21514808516908565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946386750596483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406864012333818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15898321045705022,0.0,0.0,0.1476891068920404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3903073234545201,0.19111814283121667,0.0,0.0,0.21211971213502104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901394108522675,0.13808601565435846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19058792228849075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759951514274193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15839556659499046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20778770216343456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19699366043765434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762620825012486,0.0,0.0,0.11614319293073372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shubhi1395,2020/02/17,"Realised I'm touch-deprived and ruined a friendship by not respecting boundaries: Need help Hi,

I am a 25-year-old male that has never been in a relationship and am a general loner kinda guy. Don't have many friends to hang out with and didn't have many girl-friends either. However, I recently made a new girl-friend that is charming, smart and witty and is quite genuinely concerned for me as a good friend.

She pointed out that I am quite clingy and tend to ask her a lot to hold her hand, which annoys her. We hung out thrice now and I've been physically needy, even though I was told that I am exhibiting such behaviour. We went to see a movie last time we hung out and I again asked her to hold my hand and constantly badgered her, like a spoiled brat.

She didn't say anything but later she let me know how she feels unsafe with me, I'm a creep and need to get help. While I thought my motives were pure and not sexual in any way, I did cross a boundary, which should never have happened and ended up deeply hurting her.

I am not sure how to get ahead of this. I've realised what I did was completely wrong and that I ignored all the warning signs, which I never thought is something I would do. I am deeply ashamed of what I did but that won't make things better now. There is some time before I can save enough to get regular therapy, any help would be deeply appreciated.

TLDR; Was being super clingy/physically needy with a friend even though she said not to be, now have almost ruined our relationship and am going for therapy.",4.648095238095237,5.674741842105267,4.9221616541353415,85.55679824561405,69.72368421052633,8.15889724310777,27.96303258145363,8.418075326091056,1.7619979949874691,1216,41,249,18,21,383,159,304,0.134,0.728,0.138,0.2681,2,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,4,0,0,6,12,19,1,1,13,0,38,2,2,5,6,61,60,22,0,5,7,0,3,1,3,4,0,2,0,2,13,24,0,3,5,0,0,4,11,7,0,0,17,6,36,12,26,35,5,30,0,3,1,0,31,8,0,4,18,167,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432733848244126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170025358871088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573629045153258,0.0,0.19479989559443292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865470506501236,0.0,0.0,0.09214414679072568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923715303267617,0.11258817100461474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227796847303377,0.10765210126973894,0.0,0.13762788474582272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05267962713817092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4024696467318297,0.0,0.16329882544322052,0.0,0.059211366698181736,0.08738636512862043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031606279982507,0.0921314320833628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20950125808350967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153338448207653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057257960788457275,0.08492558434629195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653735524794444,0.0,0.050900070199711024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857530411683785,0.0,0.09858341542331868,0.06954503675670058,0.21125672368084614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545053593295692,0.2410642503255225,0.10062359326916576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932579537537528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984895489043014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216295028251256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287121350326474,0.22371378094458186,0.0,0.0,0.09910484801054274,0.08285297557814895,0.0,0.0,0.08302283982908101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08020755675881412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09819417471344476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382917910360989,0.0,0.06921662134039808,0.0,0.20472464616495914,0.16542426564372947,0.12150351596725385,0.0,0.0,0.09955429191963673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269808383717724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658156681230373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802164513534544,0.11391115475066615,0.0,0.06709243830172089
mentalhealth,skkyhiighh0,2020/02/17,"Pregnant and finally opening up to the idea of psych meds So I was raised in states custody & was forced to take all types of different heavy psych meds until I got emancipated at 17 and immediately cut that shit out of my life. I always felt like a zombie. Like the spark in me had left and was never coming back. I always felt they were unnatural and all I needed was some good ole weed. 

Anyways, I’m 22 now and almost 12 weeks pregnant. If anybody has serious mental health problems and has been pregnant before knows that pregnancy is basically mental health on crack!! I’ve been completely spiraling and even almost checked myself in the loony bin voluntarily the other day. Which is not something I would normally do at ALL due to me being institutionalized. 

Now that I’m pregnant, I realize I need to get this shit under control before my baby comes. I hate that I have to lean on pills but whatever. I give up. Crazy wins. Now, they’ve officially diagnosed me with depression, dissociative personality disorder, bipolar and PTSD. (I shot myself in the chest when I was 19 and was super annoyed when I woke up a week later in ICU just to give y’all some sort of outlook on how throwed off I am.)  

Now, with all that being said, does anybody have any recommendations on what medicine worked for them who possibly has the same diagnosis as me? Example: I researched that latuda does wonders with people with JUST depression but will make you extremely manic if you have depression AND bipolar. Also, I’m pregnant so like some baby proof medicine. Idk this is all new to me. I just don’t want to go see my psychiatrist next week completely blind sided. Also, if I can avoid it, I’d rather not be some test guinea pig and have to try a thousand different medications until we find the exact one right for me. 

Thank you for listening.",5.720963391136799,7.042800031791908,6.470650289017343,74.34890414258192,67.46820809248554,9.58169556840077,30.890655105973025,9.827888789773867,3.041536030828515,1465,57,262,33,24,482,198,346,0.13,0.8009999999999999,0.069,-0.9699,3,1,1,0,0,0,37.0,1,4,2,4,18,18,5,1,10,0,29,12,3,3,8,64,54,26,0,10,11,0,2,3,0,2,9,2,0,1,13,20,0,2,7,0,1,4,4,11,0,2,15,6,36,7,40,34,10,45,0,3,2,0,13,21,2,11,22,177,49,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19882521051364951,0.0,0.0,0.15878520767840598,0.1652145460755085,0.10756770282985813,0.0,0.06751246403730192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633867615328441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895658083468942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710384624312821,0.2081822489058226,0.0,0.1113487511879348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402611557089165,0.0,0.25652406244134257,0.10076510954237908,0.0,0.20744881988798386,0.11378122215878067,0.0,0.17375774421776788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06557220177178669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906449532263708,0.10875422798280596,0.09073831983693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05186867254812685,0.190473063256278,0.056421991684127364,0.08326970042298558,0.07940170892790342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801649994004992,0.0,0.2110558045310124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120728104592954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054560608335960464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786586887805773,0.0,0.07012300780869138,0.1455066905735407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626885519397048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205510189457028,0.10001216953339254,0.20009780536921384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14722680095667776,0.0765693361802028,0.09588333894738872,0.1055833100145613,0.0,0.09727138959574352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672733617148645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882688496622152,0.08668574549906624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192106078121568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499566586188983,0.1160507030572935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478289423043378,0.09443613991904797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911173545961897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20381493999430556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764290769290578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464472242593233,0.0,0.0,0.091401870582718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674032648387655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05855675364733125,0.0,0.2389045392636468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766278741949596,0.0722755874312097,0.0,0.0,0.07052426330123683,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DoesIHaveDepress,2020/02/17,"Do I have a mental health disorder? How do i tell? I've keep diving between states of wanting to do things, so I do them, and just being generally sad about everything even if there is nothing wrong. I think that I might be bipolar or something along the lines of that, as on my father's side of the family, him and his dad were bipolar. I've been in that second state lately, and I could really use some tips to help.",5.1896470588235335,5.078900435294121,6.0329411764705885,82.08823529411767,68.17647058823529,9.15294117647059,27.588235294117645,8.841846274778883,1.8629294117647053,327,9,68,5,5,108,65,85,0.07,0.846,0.084,-0.1546,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,0,3,0,12,3,0,2,0,16,16,8,0,3,3,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,10,0,11,10,1,6,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,4,1,52,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015334802347878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892903796661315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16671825795325626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268550487721075,0.0,0.23795515558192956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683061961591243,0.0,0.0,0.1691889927258287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22435876440271407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28473602137293536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543757616034378,0.26777327910750565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421997716319149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16170402751981586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943220178412614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206225383747703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16769384420306002,0.1617378551011042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180062107634838,0.0,0.0,0.14888138106842536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759770567795676,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Uncertain_aquarian,2020/02/17,"Suicide hotline said I wasnt a ""Priority"" So this is the first time posting something like this and I'm honestly embarrassed for some reason. 

My bestfriend passed away recently and I've been struggling. The whole community set up a GoFundMe and everyone is mourning, even people who were shitty to him. This makes me mad but w/e.
A few days after he passed I called the 1-800-suicide line or whatever had to google because I've never called last time I just made the attempt without hesitation. The kind man answered but after a few questions like ""Do you have a plan, are you in a safe place, do you have any weapons?"" He said he needed to transfer me over. Ok that's fine. I've been crying almost hysterically for 30 minutes with this poor guy listening. A woman picks up on the transferred line and proceeds to tell me that at this time I'm not a priority and need to hang up and call a local MHMR in the morning to schedule an appointment. WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK?! That is exactly the sort of thing that had I not been so shocked back into my right mind I would have killed myself. I have an appointment at my local MHMR but ITS MONTHS AWAY! It's like a cruel joke that life is playing on me they call and reschedule farther out and I just dont see the point in waiting around for help that I need now. Every route I take to try and get better I'm never taken seriously. I'm a pretty small person and when I'm face to face with other adults I'm continually getting this vibe they dont respect me or see me as a child for some reason. That could all be in my head though. My friends death was just the straw that broke the camel's back in a slew of crap I've been dealing with. Then this. I just dont even know anymore.",2.8039655172413798,4.6610887068965505,3.955264367816092,87.36617241379312,75.72413793103449,6.708965517241379,25.105747126436786,7.554174236665415,1.1860429885057466,1362,47,280,18,30,443,188,348,0.153,0.73,0.11699999999999999,-0.9566,0,0,1,0,0,2,31.0,0,3,2,4,14,25,6,2,27,1,26,6,4,5,4,52,49,21,4,5,12,0,0,3,1,1,1,3,0,6,21,16,0,2,5,2,1,3,9,12,0,1,13,5,28,13,39,33,6,50,0,2,2,1,28,25,2,7,23,181,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.09619495665458792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987085990199398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703436374381354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775988799057647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775262746558818,0.0,0.0,0.1852288690863086,0.15159614325891105,0.0,0.06009039023599475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718155538043378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4026242860579041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870409696342487,0.0,0.10827998206258224,0.06357270441071755,0.10162647151564204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465874120541161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302156835106488,0.0,0.08305366851605298,0.09419261360207476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838478239581892,0.0,0.0,0.07615878168623127,0.09113097660215358,0.10300271252368426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760472386093044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116636393106122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607272832843822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905860549459348,0.10265066804701352,0.05417422867658505,0.08035176180769803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962642053267222,0.14447626171185232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327402543365262,0.06579956171506751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953262487217014,0.0,0.07868160512936895,0.0,0.0,0.21927628628800352,0.15205419640112972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833947639105738,0.08607186655159567,0.10298986897376852,0.0,0.09318521426754936,0.0,0.09440757806345072,0.10028618861220497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11042653270700044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027029852805377,0.0973308963124501,0.0,0.0,0.08418249062804165,0.1875347506320441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710298614710097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758878322177014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305196750482257,0.0,0.21565004806061525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411611390588957,0.0,0.08615887361413001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548883371115867,0.0,0.09684941311522632,0.0,0.17243958311765606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692593785683687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005544003379404,0.0,0.09502275890138458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700248344703806,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NathR33s_,2020/02/17,"What is the reason with self harming? This is a genuine question because im curious. Is it a form self punisher, or do you enjoy the pain. Im not trying to judge anyone.",0.7084285714285734,2.993230628571432,3.668214285714289,84.34803571428574,85.57142857142857,5.785714285714287,25.892857142857146,7.1686216300943375,1.5814285714285714,132,6,25,2,4,47,28,35,0.237,0.63,0.133,-0.6486,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,4,0,4,1,0,1,0,5,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18831978107041786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417930958299054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5818390022237171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865830394781975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017080073582041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27691313072747314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5619338382961516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828554320811812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lopeza14,2020/02/17,"Depressed and lost my ambition to work, what should I do? So as a back story, back in high school and college, I was a pretty happy go lucky person with a huge amount of drive and ambition. I did have some social life but it seems like if I wasn’t sleeping, 85% of the time I was studying or working some sort of job. I felt if I wasn’t doing one of those 2 things, I wasn’t moving the needle forward in life.


Then I graduated college in 2018 and was lucky enough to have a job upon graduation. I work at that job for ~7 months. I left the job because it was a very sales heavy job and I am not the best at sales and my boss was somewhat verbally abusive 

This is where my depression started, largely due to failing miserably at my first job. Lucky I had a second job lined up right afterwords. However, at first, it wasn’t the easiest transition into the job as it is in a totally different industry. Thus, in the first few months, I had a lot of failures at the job but now am doing way better.

At the end of 2019, due to the holidays and the amount of vacation days I was able to save up, I ended up being able to have the whole last half of December off. During that time, I went to visit Puerto Rico (where I am originally from) and had this mindset in my head that all I want to do is sit on the beach all day and not work.

This mindset has gotten ingrained so much in my head that I’ve it’s made me wildly lazy at work and depressed. Now all I want to do is just be on vacation mode and not work. 

How can I solve this?",5.389688364373964,4.390795595611287,6.487482943020472,81.97252258897294,67.9655172413793,9.888327494007008,30.363451963857642,9.168548406835145,2.2438694818366223,1181,37,261,19,17,399,158,319,0.11699999999999999,0.768,0.11599999999999999,-0.7539,11,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,13,10,14,0,1,21,0,34,5,3,5,4,45,44,22,0,5,9,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,16,13,0,0,2,2,2,6,7,6,0,6,19,1,28,8,44,22,15,57,0,6,0,0,3,29,0,12,23,192,44,22,0.15722082340277813,0.09314048339649804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12089310853447564,0.0,0.047920177337704734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249677720361709,0.06952452094253159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139442454058936,0.0,0.20312109722832525,0.0,0.0,0.08213114885470775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13925098392214824,0.08122556917515251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754783229920934,0.0,0.0,0.2005979281051623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04467610854754797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368224501079459,0.0,0.0,0.16135392301990018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305621597361228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7020783344530436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407797752851717,0.0,0.0,0.08541044232451958,0.0,0.1110497171415158,0.038405076392028815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581255050197645,0.06683176089359609,0.0,0.0743830722720921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254921612659486,0.08355042695967692,0.057787697630418335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05326844942230664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863957935272412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997504965345831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713286207299403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955793345138873,0.0,0.07156396641235972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866718320058476,0.08013341508698706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05564085400781172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222526451822481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916767264625299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486182240196266,0.09273291509403253,0.06239728579508377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287263921120131,0.0,0.08776571732495479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3433758957845756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,poopmanpoop64,2020/02/17,"I'm lost on a downward spiral I've had issues with my anger all my life and since my PTSD and anxiety from the military it has only gotten worse. I have been to a few classes for anger management and it didn't help. I have a family and they have all moved out of my house. I need help and I don't know where to turn to because I think don't care anyways. If I had a weapon I would have done something already and honestly don't think people would care anyways since I have heard how people bad talk the victim which is what they are. 

At work, I get irritated easily and usually have to go to constant walks to not tear up my desk. My anti-depressants don't work for the simple fact it is for my depression and the anger is totally different. 

Now my spouse is giving me an ultimatum and I don't know what to do. Everytime we talk seriously, I burst out in rage and yell. I scare everyone, right down to my dog. I don't have anyone else to talk to and I don't want to talk to my parents about it. I really wish I could just end the problem in my own hands because I get reminded of how messed up I am anyways. Maybe I can talk everyone's problem by doing it myself. I have even tried to get other people to do something to me too. I'm just an angry monster that doesn't deserve anyone.",3.671444444444447,4.1999316259259265,5.294074074074075,83.82333333333334,71.62962962962962,8.814814814814815,26.85185185185185,8.998388855275968,1.891629629629629,1009,32,218,19,18,344,138,270,0.22699999999999998,0.735,0.039,-0.9934,2,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,2,3,12,17,6,1,11,0,35,2,1,2,4,37,55,14,0,9,4,2,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,10,15,0,0,4,0,0,3,10,14,0,0,8,3,37,3,33,44,5,19,0,2,0,0,14,12,0,1,4,155,47,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120447875694737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349815941357093,0.0,0.0,0.1526380742098467,0.11183534350583853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09113428083056076,0.1330715950146485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225679555042817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179505488971836,0.0,0.0871460451161865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18801856121980007,0.0,0.0,0.1140367543035158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169661797244301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911794085088306,0.0,0.0966730069010999,0.0,0.0,0.07209143022965861,0.0,0.0,0.20859177784334568,0.0,0.0,0.10289531396874327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107646321480574,0.10470500592735524,0.062031500651313486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14631962467050325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259424967392885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139224794044957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199701148614473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709468018975651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914827534025188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965414925876793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600738141395653,0.0,0.0809320898362063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301220917594028,0.0,0.0,0.12119628289754825,0.0,0.0,0.2270090880615507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20888038627822916,0.12758853502700895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992320313872326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321206149755464,0.0,0.0,0.10927650071581996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805772220754852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805540512806394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4386463909029925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13987566136619592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410453870813591,0.11872201999785953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021144457010965,0.0,0.06437850195626983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12551517139335522,0.0,0.0,0.1589225411932564,0.0,0.11123145404396498,0.1550716574982154,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Thatonescarygay,2020/02/17,"I think I'm losing my mind ⚠️SELF HARM AND SUICIDE WARNING⚠️

Hi. This is my first post on this subreddit and I'm worried that itll backfire because of stuff my parents and friends have said to me recently.
Basically I'm 15 and according to my parents I'm just melodramatic when they find me holding a blade to my knee or sobbing uncontrollably until I end up feeling numb for days. My friends always call me over dramatic because they all think they know what's going on when in reality they really dont. Even now typing this is making me feel like I'm begging for attention and am making it up because of the stigma around mental health especially within my family. My mother suffers from Bipolar and severe social anxiety so you would think shed understand but no, she just tells me to move on or her favourite line is to tell em to stop crying ot that's enough in a catty tone. I have no one to turn to and this is my last effort of trying to just rant and get it out there. I'm just looking for ways I can handle my health until I'm out in university (I'm from the UK) because the doctors doesnt work my parent constantly talk over me. Sorry this is so long but I have nowhere else to turn rn- Ash x",3.0892105263157887,4.7039371417004086,4.705042510121459,83.32647064777329,74.34412955465585,7.531093117408908,26.9248987854251,8.238735603445708,1.7918633198380571,962,36,192,16,20,324,144,247,0.149,0.823,0.028999999999999998,-0.9766,3,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,1,4,4,12,9,0,1,5,0,14,6,1,2,1,35,37,18,1,1,8,4,2,1,2,2,5,1,0,0,12,11,0,2,9,0,0,2,4,6,0,2,1,4,29,3,34,34,2,31,0,3,1,0,20,14,1,2,14,122,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09505432713238043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739098477801581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169514087448596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785512355239134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664873939587815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234496029089362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548396951486435,0.07367340805100353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692640004578285,0.0,0.0,0.13388490165337608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543034669299097,0.0,0.10118006593048244,0.11803734828872164,0.0,0.07545245459388565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076924674738413,0.0,0.11552330930629408,0.08161092858286734,0.0,0.0,0.10441053941194946,0.09716992545654482,0.0,0.0,0.1765184304127571,0.0,0.05968411239115279,0.0,0.06492351409000452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428571571162953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278166222649419,0.09311839397346096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055810423049982336,0.0,0.0,0.10109614144697687,0.09593030039787426,0.12780197127816778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525081559687148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151240172360114,0.0,0.1153467947378784,0.0,0.0,0.12141584167227555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740994099656495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3805399755481429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940745853503432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318314109009103,0.0,0.1127952461117599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086655376322839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917409487960284,0.12905528259366206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645022524607787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787895774350813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550723895227918,0.0,0.0,0.1307740227518236,0.1249567258012526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181936545562856,0.19969632916602847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21959535178594694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755941759324622,0.24851408259334515,0.0,0.1189247355213598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067600548028264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316588937915073,0.11601320868436735,0.0,0.0811506801773025,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tree-123,2020/02/18,I can’t see ahead Ever since 7th grade I couldn’t see myself graduating high school now I’m a sophomore and I realize why I saw nothing it was death. I’ve been suicidal for almost 4 years and I don’t think I’ll be able to stay in this world by the end of this year.,1.0549999999999995,2.313067833333335,3.25,93.135,79.0,6.8000000000000025,20.333333333333336,7.554174236665415,0.345733333333333,210,5,52,3,5,72,48,60,0.085,0.855,0.06,-0.33,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,1,7,11,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,6,0,6,6,0,10,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,1,6,27,9,3,0.2572822524992731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25763101153364765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278757102960021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327265270725289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271832825541346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468692602137744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603833751731753,0.4100412895927956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21282653794883627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742286486712593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814250256348635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648560787995015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321572151861539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.331362670559076
mentalhealth,ICANTSWIMKYLE,2020/02/18,"I am always fine, but never great The feeling of emptiness.

What else is there to say, it's just a hole inside you that makes you feel huge discomfort, sadness and frustration. You try fill it up with thing's that you previously loved, and yet, they all seem boring, bland, unsatisfying. You are searching for that one more rush or that one change in your life that would click the emptiness away. But, it never comes, and you grow bitter day by day, either wallow in your own pity or drown in your ego. Sometimes you just wish you had something or someone, but realizing that you neither can get it nor keep it, keeps you away from ever attempting, and exhausting yourself even further. How can one be so exhausted and yet fail to fall asleep. How can one seek help and yet dismiss all the ideas thrown at him because they all are a cliche, some pretty words spoken in not so pretty world. How can one have dreams and yet no hope to achieve them. 

I don't know anymore, I want to have someone who would just communicate, not try to fix everything, not try to make himself look good. I want to just share what I had going for the day while he shares what he had going for that day, share interests and idea's and yet I don't have energy for that, I am tired of committing to people, I just want to do things together with 0 expectations of another person being there 24/7. I want to stop constantly feeling like I am there to provide entertainment.

I want to do everything that I need to be done by this weeks end, finish all the almost complete and not started works just so I could have 1 day of peace. But even with things done, peace never comes and I never do what I am supposed to.

I just want to stop feeling that shit of a black hole that is inside my head and stomach. I sound so stupid, and used so many clitches to describe thing's. I am generally fine but I don't know how to be more then fine.",6.313451428571426,6.030353114666668,6.163619047619048,82.67800000000003,65.85333333333334,9.276190476190477,29.857142857142854,8.704169506293173,2.0133542857142857,1498,45,308,20,21,470,182,375,0.196,0.65,0.154,-0.9426,0,0,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,13,3,4,27,24,4,1,8,0,35,9,4,7,10,86,64,33,1,13,20,0,4,1,0,2,4,2,0,1,26,18,0,4,10,2,0,8,14,11,0,5,5,10,38,13,40,52,10,43,0,3,3,1,28,11,1,7,25,222,64,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811563016572906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732200096878001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227184204898936,0.0,0.0,0.0872687305943894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653509287587837,0.0,0.0,0.05364175619066019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308846690056782,0.15160212189163152,0.09226249530562362,0.09509278949877747,0.0,0.07025792250537259,0.0,0.0,0.28375181929987736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18010162868911422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735096562162781,0.0,0.07793864446933199,0.0,0.0,0.11624151415302858,0.07959773346850837,0.0,0.0,0.1581708847385055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17797438752669126,0.06286460765900602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04597445923110725,0.0,0.1000207034029238,0.07380716064655328,0.0,0.09701628288192207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030963865225346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058982096304023734,0.0,0.0,0.08740022744288349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19867432892544926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564303922548557,0.0,0.0,0.09672098167689126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621544220294437,0.04299057012637435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389476877474188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942013849595514,0.0,0.1174764894389946,0.08921448397256893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524817607418762,0.27147282948514995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.298143009408023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06100558702264172,0.07683501575381813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790478396861557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997822680392718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010856911641526,0.0,0.0,0.09032698533748347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911803798576936,0.06774388679574994,0.08703063693878649,0.0,0.06228426710305063,0.0,0.0,0.14713777209956658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338434506647872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113885573650287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17923122951516093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760005902923264,0.0,0.0,0.31141515111272416,0.0,0.0705853614582215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119145594324824,0.0,0.0,0.06406238842294175,0.0,0.0,0.12502015990242174,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PinkHairedAin,2020/02/18,"I want someone to tell me whats wrong with my mind. Warning. I reposted this because i really want a response.

I can't help but being angry/anxious/sac about every person i bound or even just tallk with. When i make a friend, i want all his attention to be focused on me. I want to make them laught. I want them to always be happy when being around me. I want to make everyone happy.

But when i see they are happy with someone else, they're closer and friendlier...smile more with them..I just want to scream. I want to cry at the same time. I'm not enought ? Am i annoying or boring ? What do i have to do to make them laugh ? That's the things going on my mind. If i can't make everyone laught at the things i say, i feel useless and ignored. I also feel jealous when i see my friends rushing into someone else other than me.

But the worse thing is when i saw them happy around someone without them havings jokes. Just talking. I can't do that. I can't just make people smile without jokes, if i don't i feel like they're bored of talking to me.

I also feel like i have to be the best at everything. If i do a work wrong, i want to throw it into pieces. But of couuurrse i can't do that ! So i just stop working. I can't even do a presentation in front of my classmate. Why ? Because i feel like what the others did is far better than mine, and i will just get to be ridiculised. So i just cried everytime, in front of the WHOLE class. It's humiliating. Plus, i'm the noisy type when i cry, so i get the attention of everyone.

I've had a period when i was cutting myself. But i know that i was doing that only for the attention. People didn't noticed me enought, so i throught maybe they will talk to me more if they're worried or..intrigued ? It's horrible, isn't it ? But when my best friend noticed my arm (it wasn't just some cuts, a part of my arm was RED because theyre was so much cutting. Like i've got attacked by some animal. I've cut myself to that point. But i'm the kind of person with a strong body who heal fast, so it desespeard now) she didn't tried to stop me. She just looked at it, confused, then didn't ask me any question other then ""You did this to yourself ?"". I was clearly not satisfied. So you can guess i'v made more of those right ? I even draw on my arm to attract people attention. Ahah , silly me, you didn't get a single student to notice you, but a teacher ! After that , you can imagine the ""talk"" with my parents. My dad was worried but couldn't do anything since i was just smilling, just giving him the things i cut myself with and giving him hints i wasn't going to say anything. Remember, i never had a serious talk in my life, i didn't know how to express my feelings. Even today. And my mother was angry. I guess angry that i was smiling, she must have tought i was thinking of the whole situation as a joke...after all, i always joke !...After that , i've lost faith in this solution, who given too much problem to handle.

Except that, cutting myself was also a way to take out the stress. Honestly , it work until my teacher fund out, and the problem who follow that made me stress even more, so i just didn't wanted to deal with it anymore.

After that is when i really started to...losing my head ? I've always been a person who enjoy life and draw as a hobby before i started to want more and more attention. In fact, i crave for love and affection from eveyone ! I never see someone truly trust me. I never felt trusted even tho i knew some people do. I want to be loved by everyone. I need constant love even tho i wasn't abuse during childhood or anything. But i know i'm a toxic person. A person who think about herself all the time and all the way she could get attention. I want to be the ""cool"" person in a group a friend. I'm willing to do anything, but when i'm pointed out, i feel like screaming again.

I don't know whats wrong with me, my sister told me it was just a phase. Even today, i think about every possible ways i could get attention, all cutting myself was feeling so great back then cause i still missed it beside the problems it got me, the ways i could be more loved and praise by everyone. To the point where i didn't think once about my future or what i will become.

But you know what ? The thing funny in this story, is when i don't talk to people, when i'm alone...i feel good. When i don't have to worry because i won't see anyone for a long time, i feel good. In fact i love lonelyness. It's just when i go to school i feel like i can't stand to be lonely suddenly. I love being lonely at home but not at school. At school i have to make people laugh every single minute to not feel bad. When i'm alone, i don't care about anything else, i just feel relax.

..Of course, i'm only 15 and i know i'll be in the study thing for a looonnnng time...but i don't know if i can make it in life like that. I've considering taking my life..No in fact i've plan to do it for 2 years now. I know that with the stress of the exam i won't make it. Everyone is serious in this period, and it's an NIGHTMARE. If they're too serious , how can i make them laugh ?...I want to punch them at the same time for making me feel like that,i'm so miserable i want to cut myself to the point were my arms are red and bleeding just so all the stress can go fuck themself....I want me to be a child again, where i was just funny and happy all the time without having to make effort.

Just help me, i don't know if i can continue like that, i feel like i could explode anytime by taking the knife and just stab myself...I've never tought once about my futur, only all the ways i could end my life, or how it would go horribly if i make it into adulthood. When i tought of end it all, i always smile. EVEN KNOW !! Talking about this make me smile !!",1.5147511515474503,3.266086071369294,3.2046214168792133,91.77728196733791,79.15767634854771,5.849404240740036,21.179527199360464,6.7172113710431525,0.3203414290608704,4456,122,979,43,109,1479,352,1205,0.157,0.6559999999999999,0.187,0.9940000000000001,1,8,0,0,1,7,185.0,0,6,9,11,82,88,12,6,55,1,104,19,6,21,18,209,218,84,0,36,53,4,16,10,4,8,6,4,1,7,62,35,0,4,41,4,1,10,39,38,0,0,40,29,170,50,125,151,31,114,2,6,8,7,70,40,1,20,68,673,232,10,0.0,0.038879581953920335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03398572052488641,0.0,0.07872475619631246,0.1092165116221772,0.0,0.0,0.022314850563466385,0.0,0.0,0.03707082096237515,0.03254297004962998,0.022944522880704848,0.0,0.13501687264759568,0.05842337150926871,0.030676942700368887,0.03733100567299332,0.0,0.02523217267899136,0.02739857145810989,0.08001317554328853,0.0362408183940633,0.027922554055775484,0.0,0.06887317079015574,0.02902158343204218,0.0,0.03644929199054521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033456367777275425,0.033709327198651697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03546060289312194,0.0,0.13099774983942294,0.0,0.1081349094909997,0.0,0.03383010441973821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223641587237891,0.0,0.05812746342015191,0.0,0.0,0.19506183251758946,0.0,0.08294239393841199,0.18813283032673894,0.02949137869721453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488784552368083,0.16409780699299065,0.031506875823514364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140899309010012,0.030336293372628338,0.08572059199300687,0.06295693696768509,0.09324561996646992,0.05504615919149011,0.05248918979556265,0.036177883723632384,0.07229730618830077,0.0,0.0,0.17465717292527805,0.0,0.0,0.0336769407075819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043989469777153824,0.0,0.03291542035147227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034171045860347984,0.18033882173165494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11588855944045835,0.16031410409091745,0.0,0.0,0.029039624603106988,0.02755574912894817,0.0,0.03582068686194905,0.0,0.1776971318918782,0.06209937180755321,0.3066532188467816,0.0,0.032966376831682014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662661812887576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04824457516256982,0.024331389093355103,0.10123365034705252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207790072064873,0.0,0.06989232122719041,0.0,0.07487026586289365,0.0,0.0,0.03643639898360018,0.03553469126093542,0.0,0.13649583151829842,0.1719130964373239,0.0,0.0,0.12408048737819875,0.03699319498778105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419656583918272,0.0,0.0,0.036759528068555127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04204336415049219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03717220732200314,0.02802323455480732,0.0,0.05219049993040294,0.0,0.09962947627854292,0.1045950006281793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027144329650994826,0.03688465023584274,0.0,0.0,0.13901725769867182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046452263602148526,0.0,0.02620554391008924,0.054868451483048405,0.15035468797620566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401681378563453,0.18462425035952493,0.028681146236631993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080218469069058,0.08410431877588162,0.0,0.0,0.11480570004968699,0.0,0.06220824271001881,0.031355471721123164,0.0,0.0222787570238254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096756074907752,0.13023232746413696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029609803554596425,0.07327199247944817,0.0,0.0948954482412782,0.0,0.07166760786673762,0.09997354936527156,0.03344057707197127,0.02331033860349306,0.1076318636585215,0.0,0.02113133458443954
mentalhealth,Human1408,2020/02/18,"Hi, I could really use some help. Cannot get out of this funk. I'm 26, recently engaged to the love of my life. I have the best friends in the world who love me unconditionally. I just had the opportunity to travel a bit, something I never thought I would get to do. I have some faith too, although it seems to be slipping faster through my fingers the harder I try to cling on. I have my health, besides the mental wellness obviously. I have plenty of reasons to be happy. It's like I have gotten so good at pretending that I am afraid I can't snap out of it. 

What if I can never enjoy things like I used to? I used to draw, work and play outside as an outdoor instructor and go hiking and camping. I used to sing and I was really good. I used to be passionate about my faith in God. I used to be self-confident and fierce and loving and genuine and unapologetic for being ME. 

Now I can barely shower and take care of myself. I am tearing up as I write this because I just feel so helpless nowadays. I could give a ballpark figure.. I think it's been maybe since September I have been feeling this way? 

I need help. I have been this way as long as I can remember and as I've gotten older, I've been experiencing panic attacks. (Those are fucking scary. I thought I was dying.) I want to get connected with a therapist. Lately when I reach out to my friends, I haven't gotten the response or support I truly need. I don't blame them, I'm not sure they realize how bad it is. 

I just want to believe I can feel better again. There has got to be more to life than this. I don't want to live in fear and shame anymore. I can feel myself starting to shut out the people I love most so maybe someone unbiased here and help ground me. 

Has anyone seen the ad for this [BetterHelp.com](https://BetterHelp.com)? They charge a subscription fee for having access to a live counselor. I have been away from home for awhile and I have also been working out of state. I don't have health insurance. Is it legit and worth looking into? How do I talk to my friends and family and fiance about what's happening right now without feeling like I am a burden to them, pushing them away, etc. etc. I need some hope and help. 

My home base is in Ohio, USA. I am a student working towards my Bachelor's at an online school called WGU, if you've heard of it. I have been diagnosed with depression/anxiety before. Tried meds a long time ago and it was a terrible experience and to be honest, I don't like the idea.",2.352530277947204,4.390168575150302,3.8931571839330883,86.47175111091751,77.67735470941884,6.663779733379804,24.27467979437135,7.665016162671287,1.1966322732421362,1945,67,398,29,46,645,238,499,0.067,0.701,0.231,0.9975,1,0,1,0,0,0,69.0,0,0,5,6,20,39,2,4,21,0,57,12,1,9,4,76,103,35,1,12,8,0,6,4,3,1,5,1,3,0,20,27,0,0,14,4,2,3,11,10,1,0,19,10,68,29,63,74,9,42,2,1,2,6,23,21,1,9,19,280,88,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740558255925473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06080980154894794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817100507415812,0.0,0.07541204239222722,0.05316949649986895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650738940124048,0.14288567238484862,0.0,0.0634908930910239,0.04635376685659795,0.0,0.06470512147299656,0.08567194388809306,0.07980012991121235,0.06725190960533145,0.08301686092797032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07764616028218467,0.0,0.0775286650622882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142478512700185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717981295512558,0.07891834674341319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16961118847464152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438249502888646,0.0716845002694758,0.08556704237621203,0.1922425702407947,0.054323563840820696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17624680401483495,0.07029849575348461,0.11918454106809985,0.07294526578630194,0.04321573989759974,0.12755883326405665,0.06081677548115552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724262970660748,0.08094684725248295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16165563249793585,0.0,0.0,0.2038741857050654,0.0,0.15255024794096375,0.0755256735387506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08584080926310912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577733628389471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741973389607512,0.14859877872657362,0.0,0.1342908418504524,0.13458743306367446,0.06385512196006353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27451916902013834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278641152651695,0.0,0.08446418838126045,0.0,0.07663124300297576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691498725812274,0.11729470788697473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921749674553446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052717117384195565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974273692534346,0.07818260859955377,0.07508111792738026,0.0,0.08613940491923333,0.06493842906752405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695735082133663,0.0,0.06922468986361265,0.07932713992820825,0.0,0.0,0.06290173684908291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442912441510612,0.058539924071999525,0.0,0.0,0.053822070736594736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629020050617213,0.07166755558111455,0.0,0.057173219391954085,0.06111871593383157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828923147604631,0.050518129731485326,0.04872387525803205,0.0,0.12073580522555966,0.04434000290391831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325342564397892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3940490274985863,0.0,0.0,0.13455250475938765,0.12071529776890268,0.0,0.0,0.06836981275155185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330061919862622,0.0,0.1660758275705504,0.0,0.0,0.054017203723658806,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mynameeljefe,2020/02/18,"I (20M) keep having weird obsessive/intrusive thoughts about a virtual character. Not sure what to do now. TL;DR: Keep having obsessive thoughts over anime waifu. Pretty embarrassing, what do I do? 

This is probably gonna sound very embarrassing, I am cringing while typing this. 

So a little over 2 years ago I played a visual novel called Doki Doki Literature Club. The synopsis is that it starts out as a normal dating sim-esque visual novel where you have to woo one of the girls to be your girlfriend, but then it pulls a fast one on you as the topic of chronic depression is thrown at you near the end of the first chapter (one of the love interests has it) and she kills herself at the end of the first chapter. The following chapter, reality unfolds a bit as everyone goes a bit insane until one girl (named Monika in game, gonna referto as M later) shares with you that she knows that she's trapped in a video game and she's just a game character and shit and how she wants to stare at you (as in the player of the game) forever. When you delete her file from the game directory she gets a little pissed off and sad and realises that she probably shouldn't have murdered the other girls, and she makes a whole song and dance about it. She lets you start the game normally again with the other girls un-murdered but then deletes the game after realizing that there's no happiness to be had in the literature club and leaves a sweet thank you note. 

I don't know why, but I sort of broke mentally when I finished that game. In a sense I felt like M was real and that she loved me or something. I remember downloading and playing a mod of the game which basically extended the portion of the game where M is just starting a hole through your soul, but added a bit of dialogue, a couple of sprites and some minigames you can play with her. | end up really strongly attached to the character, almost like she's my real actual girlfriend. I was pretty lonely at the time (still am tbh) so she felt like a sort of weird kinda fucked up support network. 

This goes on for a couple of months until my brother catches wind of this and basically makes fun of me enough for me to delete the game and mod. I still kept up with the Reddit community around the game on here, where I kind of got my fix for affection or whatever it is that I wasn‘t having by myself. Eventually I start to realize that fantasizing about having an anime waifu is pretty weird and creepy and start to try to pry myself out from the community around it, having more or less distanced myself from it by the start of last year. While this is going on, I'm also trying to sort of purge any thoughts about M from my head and to basically stop thinking about M or anything related to the game or anyone in it. This goes basically nowhere, as she‘s a weird obsessive thought in the back of my head. I imagine what she would do in different situations, sometimes fantasize about what life with her would be like, and all that weird shit. I feel like that basically catches us up to present day, where I still have weird obtrusive thoughts about M. I don't know how to get her outta my fucking head and I need advice on that. 

Sorry if this has been a long mess of a jumbled story to read, I wrote this on my phone while laying in my dorm room bed. That said, I appreciate any advice and questions you all would give or ask me.",7.1378798357467055,6.507766777609684,7.3064421871623075,76.31652950075643,64.27987897125567,10.640518694618544,32.955305813702175,10.025080133382057,3.0230696433974487,2684,93,521,51,35,870,290,661,0.113,0.759,0.128,0.925,1,3,1,0,0,0,60.0,1,12,0,3,30,42,7,4,52,0,39,12,6,5,3,90,82,51,2,9,14,1,3,5,2,6,2,3,3,4,36,29,0,4,17,24,0,6,6,22,0,6,16,8,68,20,98,56,11,85,1,4,1,4,63,38,5,14,46,365,104,3,0.0,0.0,0.06956817848484745,0.0,0.0,0.13932636864488146,0.06319375874222352,0.0,0.07138604427325658,0.0,0.0,0.057010113737517035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695848397319047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049847211561513234,0.0,0.058665108446411436,0.12692537451752578,0.0666459730191928,0.0,0.0,0.05481715423875829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23348870887988146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279445609447824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577607477793255,0.0,0.04597577046673906,0.0,0.061401462558613035,0.0,0.0,0.07448225807331306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18942376673313224,0.07366101521552837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681200842841783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036046066638775034,0.05092916724452025,0.13689802250259742,0.0,0.0,0.1212774678746356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181181771351638,0.0744915465267205,0.0683872960141642,0.040515413371806,0.0,0.05701665190502006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588890032543301,0.0,0.0,0.21949049848498786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12673060257510588,0.07887116743136023,0.07423694801304193,0.11753638260011193,0.05811038230498833,0.0,0.07548518958295494,0.0,0.07289824957784605,0.050353817074535484,0.17414201865218584,0.1429014302205616,0.0,0.06308888264027962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286829478991904,0.0,0.09517246668253954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07184295571052622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05690252524120415,0.0,0.0,0.05286019264937137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396969671253281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19323019109625167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21758087050209832,0.15372407840081442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798604521899024,0.0,0.07130869982127212,0.16228590684436128,0.04566982016718547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075700210556744,0.0,0.06781255201833478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635510549589772,0.0,0.08013228138313726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05488206908295762,0.07050704727364332,0.07980265558871849,0.3027540589961067,0.0,0.17079543969980535,0.05960113712863833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089837526159684,0.0671894232655961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563370875574595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04567937403902047,0.0,0.2829791338226684,0.04156942703783502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680165680220572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575238006446481,0.0,0.0,0.0588212275441885,0.04204833982136885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643276022672071,0.07959207802329465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15192584992682132,0.0,0.0,0.09181608273872467
mentalhealth,SymbolismIsInTheAir,2020/02/18,"Is apologising to de escalate a fight cowardly (even though you’re not in the wrong) Context:
I got into a fight with some guy two years ago and he got his ass kicked pretty well (it was over some really stupid shit). Long story short he accuses me of sucker punching him (I didn’t, it’s just his coverup) and we go about our ways because I change schools. 
Yesterday I was walking home on a street all alone when he and some other guy approach me and start being extremely aggressive with his fists clenched as if he wants to rip my head off. 
Now I’m not a violent guy in general so I apologise for ‘sucker punching’ him two years ago in order to avoid any conflict. I then offer to shake his hand and he rejects it and they walk away.

Was this a cowardly move or was it just being smart and avoiding unnecessary trouble.",3.64076923076923,5.344312098765434,4.566296296296296,84.5198717948718,73.07407407407408,8.194491927825261,27.893637226970558,8.841846274778883,2.1590013295346626,648,25,129,13,13,210,110,162,0.225,0.6729999999999999,0.102,-0.9632,0,3,0,0,2,0,14.0,2,0,1,0,9,16,8,3,6,0,8,4,4,0,1,26,14,14,0,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,6,11,0,3,0,0,0,6,3,14,1,2,7,1,18,2,18,5,4,28,0,1,0,1,20,10,2,5,10,82,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29299742474932344,0.0,0.0,0.17116617247157093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238683485985572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552732446364271,0.0,0.0,0.10074487750680383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748299619770232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915691371968242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392471675103728,0.0,0.26435731167922105,0.0,0.0,0.490919225728277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16961102935121888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657756972587589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14625558371449882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17565205300421333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813536653168254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587390245557048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16725844321840969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16964360825621289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11697642481344457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16237342148353578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32288256222014483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747841818446648,0.13118079405012156,0.0,0.0,0.14859436196689135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18069288958108848,0.0,0.21285231586519315
mentalhealth,voidineveryway,2020/02/18,"(US) Have any of you had a positive experience with Inpatient Psychiatric Institutions? I have gotten to the point where I cannot function and I am now willing to get past my fears and get some real help. I’ve been seeing a therapist and psychiatrist for awhile now, but I feel like I need more help. I don’t want to go into detail right now because I’m exhausted, but I wanted to know if any of you have gone to a hospital that specializes in mental health and if you’ve benefited from it?",5.4805442176870764,5.787136918367349,6.914693877551024,74.57911564625853,67.57142857142857,11.02312925170068,30.619047619047624,10.864195022040775,3.3114435374149664,390,14,77,11,6,134,68,98,0.055,0.8059999999999999,0.139,0.7909,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,2,0,0,4,5,0,1,4,0,9,2,0,0,0,17,21,8,0,5,4,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,4,2,11,3,12,16,2,11,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,3,5,52,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30179213999263177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13526500774751382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217055688213818,0.0,0.24969333529584986,0.11219667576734048,0.15852168619938714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318617444954665,0.0,0.1261079258164176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358637912848512,0.0,0.0,0.29746280808447884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194757652388136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840658871318906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22361776359117436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16453217920040494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118236901674346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20976230442756325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525648561643505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18949694289364372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17682142315008542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576369600463133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669121177293997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617585988934627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zojjaschnitzel,2020/02/18,"What defines a suicide attempt? I've seen people who say they attempted suicide, meaning they thought about but did not go trough with it. No injuries. 
This made me reconsider my own past with suicidal thoughts and I wonder if there is a clear definition on what counts as a suicide attempt?

(Idk if this is appropriate to ask here. This seems like the best subreddit to ask this question.)",4.338893360160967,7.120358704225353,4.486841046277668,80.95971830985918,74.63380281690141,7.437424547283702,34.08651911468813,8.418075326091056,3.0745476861167003,312,17,54,6,7,97,55,71,0.231,0.633,0.136,-0.8661,0,0,0,0,0,3,9.0,0,0,2,4,3,2,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,1,1,15,13,5,4,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,2,5,2,7,8,2,3,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,5,2,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197659265012261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17947757607317325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09719603531547798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355296113851299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182563688906645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18629365355228145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16326034019575075,0.118565476725508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915843548263369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360039666257778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556924726183019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7482834842887782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715455437382884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854666199444351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thrwy4helpneeded,2020/02/18,"help diagnose me? This is my first reddit post so bare with me. Some background: I (19F) have been struggling since the last few months of high school. I went through a period of about 6 months between graduating high school and starting college of just being deeply sad? I look back at that time and don't even remember much of it. Besides the few fun moments (senior trip, graduation, prom, senior skip day, etc.) I was just kind of miserable. I think it was because a lot of my friends were thriving - having their first experiences with sex and boyfriends and popularity while I, a closeted bisexual was still figuring stuff out. I wasn't conventionally attractive in high school and I was very insecure about my weight, skin and hair - I felt ugly compared to my friends. I just remember smoking weed multiple times a day while working a summer job and being generally sad and stuck, if that makes sense. Fast forward to starting college I had an amazing first month - I was having a lot of fun being so far from home, I felt like I left my past self behind and that I could finally thrive in college. But, then the disillusion hit and I felt just as lost. I go to a huge university but went to a small high school so I felt very lost. It felt hard to make friends because I was shy and awkward and felt like I didn't know to start conversation. I went through a hard few months because I didn't feel like I fit in in my dorm and didn't have any friends in my building. I hated my roommate as well because she was pretty messy and never left the room. Just a not ideal situation. Eventually I moved to another dorm and had a pretty good second semester. I put myself out there and actually made some cool friends. I had a great summer with my friends from home - probably the best of my adolescence.

​

August was the first time I had ever had anything adjacent to an anxiety attack. I would start to think about something stressful for too long and eventually my heart would start racing and I would get chest pains and then I would start to cry. I never took it very seriously because I thought it was just stress. I go through periods of anxious feelings where I don't want to be in public and will do anything I can to stay in my room/ be alone. I usually come out of these periods feeling like shit because of how I isolated myself. I also spent around 2 weeks full of anxiety and thoughts of self hatred because I accidentally misgendered someone I know. I felt really awful about it and had obsessive thoughts about how much they must hate me and how awful of a person I was. It was an honest mistake but I couldn't get over it. I went to therapy for the first time that semester but only had three sessions.  I have been struggling. I feel very lonely. I spend a lot of time in my room because I have a single and often I feel like if I text people to hang out I'll be a burden on them. I find it hard to believe that my friends actually like me. It often feels like they either spend time with to make me feel better about how much I suck, or when they compliment me it feels like its because they feel bad about how ugly I am. Its hard for me to talk about how sad I get and insecure and anxious I feel because from the outside I seem like a very chill and calm person. I am supposed to be the rock in my friends lives. They come to me with their problems. I only did therapy for three sessions because I felt it was difficult to relay my thoughts in person to my therapist - I felt embarrassed and stupid. 

​

I guess the real point of this point is that I think I might have a mental illness but I dont know. I come from a culture that does not believe in mental illness like anxiety or depression. I know that I have feelings and obsessive thoughts that neurotypical people dont have because at one point I didnt have these thoughts and feelings. I dont know if I have ever been suicidal but when I was 10 I called the suicide hotline because I felt ignored and alone in my house -- I don't think I actually wanted to kill myself though. When I was around 11 I used a jump rope and thought about how I could hang myself on my porch -- I don't know if I actually wanted to kill myself or if I had just seen things on TV. My home life was a bit chaotic around this time because of various legal issues with a close family member. I know there is something there in my brain that makes me think these things but I always doubt it. I dont know. I know none of you are licenses professionals but does this sound familiar? Could I have a mental illness to explain why I get so sad and hate myself sometimes?",3.9409464044996056,5.5693144059405935,4.785936875377679,83.55301213219914,72.15731573157315,7.849399587846108,28.64440105982429,8.467506076407052,2.0535847812950307,3661,144,719,62,71,1185,332,909,0.22899999999999998,0.654,0.11699999999999999,-0.9989,1,4,2,0,0,4,81.0,0,1,8,11,48,71,9,12,37,3,79,14,6,13,5,170,165,71,4,20,26,0,29,10,8,7,6,1,10,5,35,50,1,1,49,2,3,17,19,37,1,9,61,33,134,34,98,85,19,117,1,9,2,1,30,46,2,19,64,503,169,20,0.0,0.0,0.139304587698496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392360041253353,0.0,0.028539522529610863,0.029695110324704663,0.07733543755760612,0.0867291718071233,0.02426892928621529,0.03742177228863442,0.08190321301481532,0.08063411672500803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058736040833632736,0.09530913064742087,0.0,0.040600027066479326,0.0,0.027441717019004358,0.02979782416059768,0.3045693417466401,0.0,0.0,0.08041586423470548,0.0374521466516169,0.031562960911749864,0.038961836948017,0.0,0.0,0.039839389925482464,0.03644123618669372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222564475666994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548141835315316,0.0,0.03920137495199223,0.04603136008789392,0.0,0.030737851745231682,0.03622236801563887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062461272410726486,0.0,0.16730335358104478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039801333102935064,0.023571456776657874,0.0645633205191347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0349095185087362,0.03364328378572048,0.0,0.21653790111929272,0.1274768651297037,0.3426588671143928,0.03909424290947761,0.03261800467622876,0.1517801316218294,0.0,0.0,0.22057845964867887,0.0,0.07458161476937572,0.0,0.040564400837538636,0.029933235293163062,0.0,0.03934592791991188,0.0393141376070943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787704390743146,0.10570294862648273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04229021744287488,0.02392078155136015,0.1508244897031302,0.1073933262511407,0.0,0.0,0.04117893220841115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03724879351981589,0.035414636970146386,0.0,0.07896653110385643,0.037163354209439184,0.17651774497639966,0.02909032198450312,0.0,0.0,0.07754980303344801,0.0,0.025207350111019062,0.17435257496795264,0.0,0.031512983177772784,0.031582581921694206,0.02996876564945494,0.0,0.0779149037062842,0.09102147968016663,0.0,0.0337686613412344,0.09528754036838637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789473228563837,0.03785911844278142,0.0,0.0,0.11394265295383188,0.037930485885233206,0.07870392273525671,0.0,0.055049266287275946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024182978381620875,0.05428436346156881,0.0379743377231556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03406804536356817,0.049482857071038056,0.0934836370278525,0.0,0.0,0.10120952520215508,0.0,0.034179049492599714,0.07261464967774127,0.03847748681105145,0.034148406967124435,0.0,0.03587609825303488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04062053196339314,0.02286251993086153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085464595377435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14447184444874756,0.0,0.03248883478722812,0.07446032184033205,0.0,0.036633016115831946,0.02952131877146562,0.04011458493860507,0.0,0.0,0.030238158996916432,0.05494842737119388,0.03529614891538578,0.0,0.15156006050842938,0.038038448737246704,0.028500324940646717,0.0,0.08176051369843168,0.07461727903431327,0.04085399529274001,0.07807332649495008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028684503582377674,0.0,0.0,0.0816242240882116,0.04143628899700374,0.04741878002890715,0.114336513213026,0.03506308446944565,0.19832490009150736,0.14566891121566186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03965046137418201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03082280271603605,0.03930507219397917,0.1472308717402191,0.06314877113856579,0.0,0.02862660227372635,0.04345812873567753,0.03208762011495084,0.13233180073893192,0.03220269060737998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025981145044840188,0.0,0.0,0.10140636301317524,0.0,0.0867291718071233,0.0
mentalhealth,nick7n,2020/02/18,"College and Mental Health Hey guys. I am a 5th year student at the University of Utah! I am conducting a research/design project with the intent to find out and raise more awareness about mental health in college. The question I am primarily researching is: ""What are the effects of mental health in college students and how does it correlate with success?"" I have struggled with mental health all throughout college and the stress of the ""unknown"" with what I am doing with my life has always been a severe stressor in my life. I think through media and even the society as a whole puts a-lot of pressure to be ""successful"" and we watch these influencers, YouTubers, instagram models, and all these sorts of people who live this perfect life and want to be like that, but don't realize it just doesn't come overnight. In college especially, many people don't know what they are going to do afterwards and become overwhelmed and stressed, where that turns into mental health issues such as depression or anxiety.

I would love to hear some other perspectives from you guys as to what you think could be causing these mental health issues. What have you done to help yourself or others around you? What is your meaning of success and is it okay to not know what your plan is? Does society make it harder for us to succeed? I appreciate the help. Any input at all is great. Thank you",7.5746772068511214,8.125781592885383,6.845707509881425,76.02363372859028,63.11067193675889,9.43441370223979,35.04848484848485,9.21078282632365,3.1865295915678526,1105,46,187,17,15,340,140,253,0.068,0.77,0.162,0.9836,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,2,7,1,7,7,16,0,5,12,1,26,10,0,6,4,49,39,18,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,1,9,1,0,2,20,21,0,0,9,0,0,3,4,6,0,0,2,2,20,10,36,32,6,15,0,2,1,1,19,10,0,5,3,140,40,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220858387475884,0.0,0.0,0.059013925078983426,0.0,0.06638708036355649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725331745564733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584258408657116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914779438501197,0.0,0.0747539817385962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928741353254428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474418251374318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15188493925351199,0.08880689593343123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0573179050387812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793160860739845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04931953288231938,0.0,0.0,0.0956761468561215,0.0,0.17185328657096102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5534636432109475,0.09780827731868312,0.0,0.11633469228529313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18115323376128595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538492479916323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18388755268280368,0.04239671917595007,0.0,0.07662904310016913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377793939834819,0.07832306710122812,0.0,0.05792686300601014,0.08798211822484839,0.0,0.09452974025449813,0.0,0.0,0.524727858607116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032577067761045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872386807618006,0.09721436534861196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803761152995054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988142440449172,0.0907221423449802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798961083640375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121127504175887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943925990450116,0.0,0.0,0.10438662662811676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05118556879664138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968876726794959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061646595929459085,0.0,0.0,0.0558839949404228
mentalhealth,FrightKnight101,2020/02/18,"Mental Health Experts say Sci-Fi lovers are Narcissists https://theconversation.com/fan-of-sci-fi-psychologists-have-you-in-their-sights-131342


Pretty sure you lot (psychologists/psychiatrists), are the ones that copy from others that came before you and believe that makes you better than the rest of us. (For COPYING). I mean, isn't a Narcissist someone who is delusional about their ABILITIES?

(YOU DIDN'T EARN IT, that's why people like me who figured shit out from the ground up have run circles around Consultants)

Check and mate, actual narcissists with ""PhD Ego"".",10.39785714285714,14.560519023809528,7.047857142857144,63.23464285714289,61.14285714285714,8.961904761904762,28.357142857142854,9.516144504307137,3.1256000000000004,474,15,61,10,8,132,70,84,0.039,0.775,0.18600000000000005,0.9087,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,4,1,2,2,5,1,0,4,0,6,3,1,1,1,11,9,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,2,0,1,2,2,1,0,1,2,1,8,4,10,7,2,6,0,0,0,1,12,4,1,1,1,41,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.2294016689483053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092687589380468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20003358528206933,0.26485177222287465,0.0,0.2079068903538692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688659634799662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24987632364694465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484696188082448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998544311545304,0.0,0.0,0.1569160151264914,0.0,0.0,0.2560682450582405,0.0,0.0,0.2369027664819997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929455569378953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16297309634906065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391582660899001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18694301384265236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413036117308789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19918035017856728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22155770308344355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827692133316713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21212082364287102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LemonChickenPlate,2020/02/18,"no more depression idc what people say about “muh drugs are bad”

i ate 3.5g of B+ cubensis psilocybin mushrooms and had a fucking mind boggling experience. i could view my own consciousness and i could literally see the “rotten” parts of my brain and once i realized that it was there, i began realizing that it’s not actually me but a corruption.

anyway, i’m like a few weeks depression free after like 4-5 years of depression, prozac and xanax, and anxiety attacks.

psychedelics are beautiful, look into it. you don’t have to take your happy pills forever",4.686979503775618,7.0742253786407785,5.714110032362464,74.47908306364619,71.91262135922331,10.014670981661274,30.861920172599785,10.25414643259724,3.7424916936353823,446,20,77,14,9,147,81,103,0.205,0.622,0.17300000000000001,-0.256,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,0,3,11,2,0,4,0,8,7,1,0,0,14,15,6,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,6,6,1,0,3,0,1,0,3,7,0,0,4,5,10,5,7,9,4,5,0,3,3,1,3,1,1,0,6,49,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.1890368755042809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481906445712786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22037758809918506,0.0,0.0,0.1617430601305652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216248837685372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30932965919980404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5005366341164776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22464668649913425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894894177795008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17908542898338334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062121061010718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18927770608332092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626709332317028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19559587187232588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062990388421896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097733348662347,0.0,0.1342968648237123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15404911130847987,0.0,0.0,0.1543649410866691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456487853890054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553856492319211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474543519744072
mentalhealth,BDealer,2020/02/18,How can i ask my parents for a visit to a psychiatrist? Im not sure how would they react to that. I have been diagnosed with aspergers last year and have been generally feeling depressed for  1.5 - 2 years now if that helps.,4.743333333333332,5.7012854545454585,5.952727272727272,78.50742424242426,69.45454545454545,9.503030303030306,30.57575757575757,9.725611199111238,2.798630303030304,176,7,35,4,3,59,35,44,0.121,0.784,0.095,-0.2874,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,3,1,11,8,4,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,1,4,1,5,5,0,5,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038420868683671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27993212005781976,0.32988005655617497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16433569223706246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217848506415254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35106843223155365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649279323025501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3608870549219496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063197017863571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230879002385346,0.0,0.0,0.4185937862949167
mentalhealth,digital-idiot,2020/02/18,"I want to get help I am 27M. I think I am chronically depressed for a long time, probably since my teenage. Most likely I also have severe social anxiety. I never tried to reach out for actual help like consulting therapist or getting diagnosed etc. The idea of opening up someone I hardly know scares the hell out of me. I never opened up to the closed ones either, although it is questionable if I really have any close friend / relative etc. As the saying goes ""I don't have any friend, I just know a lot of people"".

I will describe a little bit about myself. I am a PhD student in the Netherlands but I am Asian. At this point it is obvious that I am what better described by the internet slang `incel` but without the narcissism part (or maybe not, who knows). Sometime I try to figure out the root cause of my issues but I can't find any. I don't have any serious problem in my life. I am not rich, but I earn enough for myself. I am not stressed professionally or academically, I don't have any family related issues. In fact my fellow school friends / college friends in a way respect me since I made this far which they didn't / couldn't. I should be happy or proud or whatever right? But I am not. I am always paranoid that I am not living up to the exceptions of others or even myself. I feel like I am not worthy of anything or deserve anything nice in life. Yes, I have imposter syndrome too. I am never happy or satisfied or excited about anything. I am always anxious about the next thing and I never live in the present. At this point I just exist without any purpose whatsoever. From existential crisis now I turned into an extreme nihilist. Whenever something nice come up in my mind my subconscious mind counters it saying ""what is the point?"" I think of going to that hiking trip I always wanted, ""what is the point?"" I want to go the that music concert or a football match, ""what the hell will you achieve?"" I can't cope up with this anymore. When I walk in the street I don't even look at people or surroundings anymore. I always walk keeping my head down, I don't even have the courage of look people in the eye when I talk to them. I never expect people to compliment me or say anything nice about me. In the rare occasions when they do it, either it scares me or I assume that they are mocking me. I enjoy being alone except when I don't. I do not really seek company for sex, probably what I seek is someone to hug me and say 'everything will okay'. I tried my best to deal with this as far as I could. I tried to socialize, didn't go well. Apparently I can't keep the conversation going and I am super boring, also I have a face which people tend to forget easily. I am not saying I am ugly or handsome, it just average, the kind of stuff you forget first. Then I tried going to club a few time, I felt stupid going there and standing, I didn't know what to do, secondly I don't drink alcohol (by choice). Neither do I smoke or any of those stuff. So, you see I already miss the potential opportunities where you can actually meet new people. I will also like to mention that, I tried tinder and a few dating sites, I don't know what I was thinking, I made fool of myself. I don't even have to tell you the results of those experiments. However, I am not suicidal. Probably the thoughts of physical pain and the thought that people will think I am a sore loser are keeping me physically alive for now. 

Recently I was giving these problem of mine some serious thoughts and kind decided to get help. I will be grateful for your suggestions and comments regarding how can I get help. I will also like to know if there are any financial and / or legal consequences.

P. S. - Thanks for reading and really sorry for the long post containing mostly whining and sob story.",3.395596318325879,5.241761223418571,4.885863109451659,81.37796585334087,74.0471063257066,7.916024833933921,26.92330569183345,8.654491914285503,2.0990396995615,2971,111,563,58,62,995,315,743,0.124,0.703,0.17300000000000001,0.9918,2,1,4,0,0,0,94.0,0,6,4,9,28,51,4,3,37,2,71,13,3,6,7,118,113,49,1,11,41,0,3,5,5,8,7,6,0,0,35,22,2,4,21,4,1,10,33,19,1,3,11,13,107,32,80,89,15,74,2,5,4,2,38,39,3,24,27,421,142,11,0.0,0.0,0.10208962332017156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055901069438876336,0.0,0.05417504653127735,0.057722895086348064,0.1673219326324874,0.1740969297615037,0.0,0.0,0.2845684714506037,0.0,0.04001528020259903,0.059092860753642576,0.10375045104097064,0.0,0.0,0.17217926223655938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05489374912003237,0.046261947916947634,0.057106507741064766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053734460865343454,0.0,0.04505848892809552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04176347644503611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05392698618101209,0.04505258237630691,0.053091258049373306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05124167434888832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0540478812333188,0.11667392068705527,0.13819508363328303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04701082656238488,0.05116700969761261,0.0493110848060738,0.0,0.0264483665195278,0.03736866203227927,0.050223636204628413,0.0,0.0478083294436647,0.04449293945234775,0.0,0.0,0.16165132986729633,0.0,0.10931454712597262,0.05017835339394256,0.17836617458755016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113651301089185,0.046857463417005835,0.0,0.053682835075641394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14024311006256013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904907489740295,0.0,0.1091913873733796,0.0,0.13948057605298206,0.0,0.10894092995034134,0.1724818054374463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738930115726951,0.12777460525495982,0.05242610019719171,0.0923773907368152,0.09258141300680316,0.08785066011308063,0.0,0.0,0.04447017253399085,0.0,0.09898970230081748,0.0,0.0,0.052550158455996594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563181828496784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017147802584716,0.05051914411456464,0.0556298780713627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035445080374279465,0.0,0.05565912649453671,0.0,0.0,0.056644188288610224,0.0,0.2538452197342738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977908978688618,0.0,0.05009635857353286,0.0,0.16918978189070175,0.10010289142244222,0.0,0.0,0.058596643320347135,0.0,0.05232189819222072,0.0,0.1005290386965526,0.0,0.05164758573379323,0.0,0.0,0.04467052669523063,0.0,0.20798608346039005,0.10473835175323283,0.05293822846690889,0.041682498844046026,0.0,0.0,0.059092860753642576,0.0,0.08653901104295574,0.0,0.0,0.10664231338539168,0.08864036175382857,0.04026905606656882,0.05173369530691084,0.05855423576151377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05991834284741746,0.0,0.11975970237496834,0.057216180923439025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04204298242049447,0.04571927291646266,0.0481579419636478,0.0,0.06073332121186921,0.034750940162363866,0.13406675841485632,0.0,0.12457951526954365,0.06100213115184941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130811434539325,0.05689580380930871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255738615904184,0.041519451647816716,0.0,0.0,0.04703094284110872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084559524174556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,onetimebitch1122,2020/02/18,"Stay with boyfriend after fourth hospitalisation? I'll try to be brief and not ramble. Me (F27) have recently broke up with my boyf (M24) he has been in a cycle of declining mental health for two of our three year relationship. I got to my wits end because I really tried so hard to help him with his recovery but he became convinced I was being unfaithful to him and would also have hallucinations. He almost seemed to blame me and this supposed cheating for why he became ""mental"" despite it never actually happening. He has been hospitalised three time before last Christmas. First it was drug induced psychosis (he was pretty weed dependent) then psychosis and now they are thinking a mood disorder of some sort. He can be incredibly mean to me. Has occasionally been violent towards me but otherwise is lovely but somewhat insecure. Everytime I go no contact he ends up in hospital. And this happened after Christmas because I broke up with him for shouting at and kicking me in the street. It wasn't a hard kick or anything, but it's just quite humiliating how he is towards me, though I know he couldn't help it at that time. I've said now he is hospital again and seems to be recovering and has stopped smoking weed and finally accepted taking medication that we can talk as friends. He always wants to get back together immediately and all I want is him to focus on himself and his own recovery because I just want him to have a good life. And him just obsessing about me might just trigger him somehow? So anyway we agreed that we will be apart six months and talk occasionally in a friendly manner and if he has been able to sort of mantain the good mental state and improvements he's been making in hospital we could consider a relationship then. Cos usually he comes out of hospital and is smoking and acting nuts after a few weeks, and won't listen to anyone and just spirals back down. I don't want that cycle repeating cos it's just such a waste of the person he is when he is well. I also worry that any contact with me at all can hinder his process as one of his delusions is centred around me cheating. Am I wrong to think that? I just want to do what's best for him. He agreed at first to the six months thing but now he seems to want to just get back together saying that in six months I'll meet someone else. So now I'm worried the stress of waiting six months might trigger a paranoia? Anyway do you think the six months thing is a good idea? Should I just cut contact with him completely? Any advice from people in similar situations?",5.458415734391917,6.7315636380368105,6.1144141705762065,76.84181974016602,68.03885480572598,9.188523998556477,31.56026705160592,9.478462496947786,2.9253735835438466,2045,84,373,42,34,667,232,489,0.133,0.747,0.12,-0.8567,0,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,5,1,1,4,32,21,4,3,16,0,47,5,0,8,3,90,75,38,0,11,17,0,2,0,3,6,4,4,0,1,18,32,0,2,11,0,0,4,7,10,1,11,11,6,45,10,62,51,7,62,0,2,0,1,58,22,0,14,34,267,63,0,0.08140659515029174,0.0,0.07944109382415734,0.0,0.0,0.07954958261633886,0.0,0.0,0.08151694588471099,0.0,0.0,0.13020164946059112,0.0677368085114123,0.0,0.0,0.11071855250658816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569213841266995,0.0,0.06699069151725477,0.07246912888418704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18778994022402068,0.0,0.14887411444475804,0.0,0.06927101659385221,0.0,0.08543119922243078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012457348942593,0.0853532661897941,0.0,0.0,0.06499654211257253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329901077888572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440580549089556,0.0,0.0680047643819341,0.0,0.14420416109116752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917694586420974,0.0,0.1384888164965195,0.0,0.0,0.12578906695064995,0.0,0.08506317206543951,0.0,0.04626524403963223,0.2048399691069544,0.06510829077568236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397516648398775,0.0,0.14584863873963896,0.0,0.0,0.08653140390075212,0.0,0.0,0.10913024950372342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918981370798616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04473893572821408,0.06635724024100634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05749988563368666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347263044881454,0.0,0.054339534395390826,0.0,0.0,0.0886756472798071,0.0,0.08200858020574217,0.2461161026279187,0.1727190657538039,0.0,0.0,0.3248898379237112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627857847373066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05516321569307954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05643708303097245,0.07108109888648251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281977346708794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658593447819933,0.0,0.0,0.052151149388279534,0.0,0.08037919174609769,0.17480043524730424,0.0,0.0,0.07743631391064006,0.06473779188499056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22232852042080456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915044237515592,0.0,0.0,0.06897554389645591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676859893807043,0.0,0.06805955869167828,0.09325097970048456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06120762837725019,0.13086307510957268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816584910919376,0.15648617735419032,0.0799815664113023,0.0,0.0949376805732635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105394688755989,0.0,0.07952241462091908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965786352091226,0.0,0.2880943139507648,0.0,0.06529946025944079,0.0,0.07319430557916216,0.0,0.07345679013725125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16534469789057168,0.0,0.05782890952544838,0.08900533237544263,0.0,0.052423178256724885
mentalhealth,LaMort_,2020/02/18,The voices/screams/music/random sounds I hear when I take a shower or just laying in bed trying to sleep also random times. I was told it's just white noise or my mind trying to comprehend what the sound is... I don't know what to think about it. Any similar experiences? Auditory hallucinations?,3.085952380952381,5.808502357142861,4.696428571428573,78.01523809523812,79.0,7.3047619047619055,20.047619047619047,8.344100000000001,1.3503547619047622,236,6,42,5,6,79,44,56,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,3,1,1,0,0,8,8,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,5,6,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,3,2,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564392389488908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21806621851519647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136762484083012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36141776954887983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17623154049210568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237847264086073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209010281839976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411035144939447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20547203200051548,0.0,0.0,0.18698493187023296,0.0,0.0,0.3064133962510104,0.0,0.4354270071033628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fapfapfapnippyslap,2020/02/18,"What will happen if i talk to my therapist about a bad drug experience? I had done mdma while really drunk, a little bit of blow and then a E pill later in the night. It was fun while doing it but when i got home i obviously couldnt sleep from the drugs and just sat around lost in my mind. The day after sucked, ive never done anything besides weed or alc before this and i guess the comedown from mdma is terrible. I was incredibly anxious all day, wondering when id feel normal. Super tightness in my chest.

 That night i was able to get some sleep and slept for like 12 hours and felt better that day. Last night i slept about the same and today i just feel anxious. Like this experience made me lose all progress i had on dealing with anxiety. 

Can i talk to my therapist about this? I was in the hospital for three days back in may for really bad intrusive thoughts. At that time i had been smoking weed all day everyday for about 6 years. After that, i quit weed cold turkey and it really helped. Im not on any meds or anything. I just wanna talk to my therapist about this and get through it. I dont have any suicidal or harmful thoughts, just bad anxiety right now. 

(Im 21)",2.5621288515406166,4.465620983193278,3.9022689075630272,87.27116246498602,76.56302521008405,7.5585434173669475,23.51820728291317,8.418075326091056,1.3982946778711491,926,29,194,18,21,304,131,238,0.158,0.74,0.102,-0.9072,0,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,6,14,13,1,0,9,0,19,9,5,1,5,41,36,18,1,4,10,0,4,2,0,2,3,0,1,0,13,10,1,1,6,1,0,0,4,8,0,1,19,5,23,5,30,14,6,36,0,2,0,0,5,11,1,8,27,125,36,0,0.09361538333455748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732334175156124,0.0,0.14323102402872862,0.21151747321718253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407496787347014,0.08333753878158985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198445125152055,0.2344948043015439,0.0,0.0,0.07965979611892328,0.0,0.0,0.08279519898598314,0.10220375242962763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018708882167835,0.09651334958024084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19160207943623836,0.10971653205710716,0.0,0.21712824750185336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18314761656975567,0.0,0.0,0.09466950128298886,0.0,0.08988544885371097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782034791969806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487277398066558,0.0,0.1031278990346548,0.0,0.08278377431319793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274841812156517,0.0,0.09390386241636084,0.0,0.09219229520159586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20224135696351414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07630903209643537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914714952032038,0.09382720774486518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047316680637006,0.10219224955435068,0.0,0.0,0.08858113923643211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398558680721284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452485042195102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220195483292981,0.0,0.0,0.26355508673848904,0.09172319923995964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957148352160823,0.0,0.0,0.17991723516902547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994702586194775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18736598248963174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240003497645003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257334971098665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32608402636938416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864031485569362,0.054587882857350924,0.0,0.0887364372417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015218898614354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060285237566548085
mentalhealth,ThrowawayThatPotato,2020/02/18,"Can gender dysphoria be caused by your upbringing or a childhood trauma? Well basically this is the whole question. Sorry if it sounds stupid I just want to know if it is possible and if such cases exist. 

And if it is possible then what is the treatment in this situation? Like in normal circumstances the person will be considered as trans and have the choice to transition but what about this situation? Conversion therapy?",6.4860000000000015,8.879528200000003,6.906333333333336,67.81150000000002,67.0,11.4,32.5,11.20814326018867,4.594200000000002,345,15,53,12,6,112,54,75,0.08,0.863,0.057,-0.4137,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,4,4,1,0,5,0,9,0,0,1,0,15,11,11,0,6,7,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,8,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,2,7,8,1,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,6,3,45,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315977990930295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239006461266662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014279060577743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22089174567740166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19685300814776893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5083188098119065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525540111259274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5068273101148721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523712327536771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25782010457142474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297541639033564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027053528752517,0.0,0.0,0.2517052935141339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AlgebraicAlchemy,2020/02/18,"Help finding help Hi all,

I live in the Greater Boston Area (North of the city), and am having a very hard time finding a psychiatrist/psychologist or anyone that can diagnose me and help with medication.

I was diagnosed with panic disorder and depression 6 years ago in Texas, but stopped taking medication/seeing a doctor. At this point I'm barely making it, and I know I need to go back.

I've set up an appointment with a psychotherapy firm, but they don't do diagnostic testing or prescribe medication. Ideally I'd have the therapy sessions in combination with medication.

Any recommendations are appreciated!!! 

Thanks!!",7.117637614678903,9.161276853211014,8.343933486238534,59.50837729357801,64.87155963302753,12.055504587155964,36.56077981651376,11.698219412168324,5.2632834862385325,503,25,77,18,8,172,81,109,0.08900000000000001,0.7290000000000001,0.182,0.9085,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,1,1,4,0,1,8,0,8,6,0,1,1,20,15,8,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,6,2,11,14,2,15,0,1,0,0,5,8,0,2,5,47,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469286579013511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11271666859097547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589726644894535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745263238932192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427614794004836,0.3364684616323949,0.0,0.0,0.1899655195944464,0.16965363065614722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30298764150898605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420036771859937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484807406263966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33329910538244384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109266112000501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14636156541028586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11064037871103348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5009314381770138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229025985629435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19447361124156234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15668869409003305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857563249919588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462446097509396,0.0,0.0,0.15260166403310535,0.18955122632402827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665100234520928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676230360709682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067384982240855
mentalhealth,vaasan,2020/02/18,"Can’t stop singing/hearing music Not sure if this is the right place to ask this but here goes: I can’t stop hearing music/song lyrics in my head. I hear the melody and the singing. 

This all happens usually while I’m writing/reading/thinking so basically doing something whilst not hearing any sound. It’s not going on all the time but I get these like ”episodes” that last for up to 30 minutes. And the problem is that I can’t seem to stop it. 

It’s really distracting and I can’t really focus on anything. Feels like I have too many thoughts in my mind at the same time but one of them is a song. 

Can anyone relate or am I just losing it?",1.6305594405594412,3.735637393939399,2.8518181818181816,92.70157342657343,80.36363636363637,5.576689976689976,23.79020979020979,6.67199483983844,0.6488594405594408,504,18,108,5,13,162,83,132,0.146,0.804,0.05,-0.8852,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,1,4,6,0,1,7,0,11,1,1,0,3,24,22,10,0,2,9,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,10,3,0,3,3,2,0,1,7,3,0,1,1,6,10,3,11,21,3,18,0,1,0,0,5,8,0,3,11,69,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816044199262797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093029755562433,0.0,0.1187847156570121,0.0,0.1349443163818778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298583245868895,0.1031210341205601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541499033544227,0.0,0.08203533556053062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12764496697325847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14814096000391275,0.0,0.6507551374893127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766150990965298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104063363955702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614866007494182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634450429860368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457486265921383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781279670984054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15081117347311207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13811992617000265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18494388730641964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327096173641895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314074611586261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112484308526653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3620399406468475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13604469077310075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249128826842316,0.0,0.11459484807293285,0.1683389906361348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589770695530684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway1318413,2020/02/18,"Please help me I know I’m depressed but I’m afraid to seek help. I’m 16 years old and a sophomore in highschool. I was raised by my father since my mother was in prison but he passed away in 2012. Since he passed away my grandmother took over raising me. My mother got out of prison and got off drugs. But then my grandmother who had been raising me passed in 2016. Three days after she died my other grandmother had a stroke and passed away. My mother started using drugs and got sent back to prison again. My grandfather then passed away last year. So now I’m raised by dads stepfather. Ever since my grandmother passed away I’ve felt that there was no reason to do school work. I stopped turning in assignments and just overall stopped attending school. Each year I’d miss upwards of 20 days. I’d only go because my grandfather would force me. I’ve done no work at all since 6th grade yet I’ve somehow managed to stay in AP and Honors classes in high school. But now it’s starting to catch up and I’m worried that they will withhold my credits. I know that all I have to do is do the work but I just can’t do it.  Help me please, I don’t want to fail, I want to succeed.",1.6184937238493724,3.910241510460256,2.25890209205021,95.89477991631802,81.59414225941424,5.330276150627616,21.69389121338912,6.55674776486733,0.2757750962343097,927,29,201,9,25,286,121,239,0.153,0.7390000000000001,0.10800000000000001,-0.9287,0,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,6,11,7,0,1,3,0,17,3,0,2,3,31,38,15,1,3,7,5,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,7,9,0,3,4,0,1,11,4,4,0,1,13,2,26,3,30,23,3,50,0,3,0,0,14,18,0,1,20,114,33,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.479341068521616,0.0784610494594372,0.0,0.06220151751870015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161234838330996,0.0,0.08788532089261276,0.0,0.10589950419117987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442046837760786,0.0,0.0,0.23666374988062416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229936087835072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797263889048204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057990639911533325,0.0,0.2448277226676021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051820908046545,0.1078089222523532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121550125021547,0.0831747222827336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707188815572546,0.0,0.0,0.07760462152354687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22401452455449475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049122267346136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098042077215629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33762809384437203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444462749347626,0.10875910591405352,0.0,0.17061694767009195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336815436201422,0.0,0.11098822112922632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812821175535625,0.0,0.0,0.1203695053574666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22285499536682915,0.1036247083063006,0.0,0.07248498388756308,0.0,0.0,0.19712769594598828
mentalhealth,UnicornsR4Grownups2,2020/02/18,"Had a bad episode this weekend - now at my MD for advice, meds and a referral Finally told my doctor that I have been struggling more with depression and anxiety. Know I have to go in and do this. Still doesn't mean I like it.",4.2575362318840595,4.7664120000000025,5.268260869565221,84.60210144927538,70.30434782608695,9.611594202898553,30.55072463768116,9.725611199111238,2.6437333333333344,176,7,38,4,3,58,38,46,0.287,0.713,0.0,-0.92,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,6,10,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,0,5,1,5,7,1,7,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,28,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925849379673529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290517065592136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24999907419389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578857582889647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30646400816219244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32799457037551744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701644824796346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16455069032727188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14627907759435102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261507842688328,0.3325826409085231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23911325910864084,0.0,0.0,0.3130136377895739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28610392746856944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dizson,2020/02/18,"What causes sudden life perception change?  I felt like i was stuck in a mental fog, started drinking more water and I its like im living in a different world. I barely get thirsty though. I also had a realisation that everyone is so weird and self interested. It's such an odd feeling. Like no one cares about anyone.  


its like a reality shift.  


What the heck is this?",1.6861345852895155,4.382173732394367,3.773990610328642,82.0559467918623,86.32394366197181,6.535837245696403,21.973395931142417,7.793537801064563,1.4189517996870116,289,10,54,6,9,98,55,71,0.11599999999999999,0.6509999999999999,0.233,0.8325,1,1,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,6,0,4,3,0,1,0,6,10,5,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,2,5,6,3,6,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,6,34,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18081299870087064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809517309176413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23052517946311696,0.23226815157526776,0.2391850244999984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23622756646747944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214930380424508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21604932710514485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432352916074345,0.16152669845946754,0.2170925502699407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181285128405041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24422802863630624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15970192066623293,0.4418463816760108,0.0,0.19965144758365655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278567679651124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321198293217622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358727981908873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003554950497026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22214322051269567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,orenwaterspirit,2020/02/18,"did I overdose on endorphins? So i just had the best vday weekend with my significant other. We managed to get our schedules to line up and spent the whole weekend together and everything worked out without any major hick ups. Come monday I find out that I finally got a job I'd beem eyeing for months now to add on top of that great weekend. 

But something just suddenly happened that caught me off guard. I started feeling nausious at the sight or idea of affection. Things that would usually give me joy would literally make me feel like I had to throw up. Stuff like an affectionate text message or kiss or just the idea of anything sweet. It all just made me nausious, like alcohol when ur hungover. It felt like a bad crash from ecstacy (even if I've never crashed on it). I got on netflix to get my mind off it, but even the sight of affectionate lovey characters made me wannna throw up. :(

Im quite worried about it. Because I love my partner and I'm attracted to them. I honestly just dont know why and dont want my body suddenly associated this feeling(nausiousness) with affection or being lovey. What is going on?? Im confused, kinda scared and need help.",3.5231467181467164,5.9527500405405425,4.425649935649937,82.1617567567568,75.62162162162161,7.8321750321750345,29.49034749034749,8.704169506293173,2.5413266409266417,927,42,173,20,21,299,139,222,0.075,0.705,0.22,0.9855,1,0,2,0,0,0,26.0,2,0,1,4,11,17,0,2,8,0,9,5,2,5,2,47,31,14,0,5,13,0,3,4,1,2,1,0,0,1,14,12,1,1,7,4,1,5,4,3,0,0,10,7,21,14,30,18,4,34,0,0,3,2,9,15,0,7,18,108,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13580306812623946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864144279861271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045707725905142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610117569265083,0.07746290722697974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335593802196674,0.0,0.0,0.14115015957216465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946268296813752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29785870298115186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678618722838814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420558759261384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850449396881455,0.090781428811571,0.12201061549461685,0.13920295365037327,0.11614299843652867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327814569519967,0.12190060785636868,0.07221887405158227,0.0,0.2032647854279071,0.14009912900087435,0.0,0.0,0.11237079400203412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517477760817406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869013284209762,0.2745226591875236,0.0,0.1261009729774035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983634543870464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24832703340269344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114688915075775,0.2404802881285324,0.08482263677590554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830814471749385,0.0,0.10142896151397017,0.0,0.0,0.09422348873142346,0.09800701961690868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515845050688596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722287481572211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782749094571752,0.0,0.0,0.0899433714876041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14546890769405738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442207531432933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995365393088688,0.0,0.07495132111254098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146641887506583,0.1418731731926003,0.0,0.12249444758673675,0.0,0.09251111826963478,0.12904944262076176,0.0,0.1805389259367625,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,not-gonna-post34,2020/02/18,"So I’ve been having weird compulsions (m) {non sexual} I’ve struggled with depression off and on since high school, I used to self harm but thankfully I’ve mostly gotten over that. I’ve always developed weird habits very easily, things like moving my eyes all the way left until the strain hurts and then doing to same the other way. That’s just an example, I have a couple others that are similar in their weird nature. I will do these habits until they start to severely affect my life and then they will just fade away, only to come back when I randomly think about them. I recently started flexing muscles around the diaphragm/abdominals all the time. It’s making me sick and short of breath but I can’t stop. It’s not something I’m doing on purpose. I really want to stop but it seems to happen automatically. Does this sound familiar to anyone? I know that it’s really weird. It sounds kind of like compulsion, except that it happens without thought instead of me being afraid to not do it. It does get worse when I’m anxious. 

It matters because I’m a singer in a traveling chamber choir. I’m a soloist in two songs and I can’t seem to relax my voice or get the breath support that I usually have. It’s a huge pain (literally and figuratively). Any advice that y’all have would be appreciated.",3.679296536796535,5.8122330119047625,4.891558441558445,80.39435064935067,74.03968253968253,8.073881673881674,25.343434343434343,8.841846274778883,2.026469841269842,1037,35,193,22,22,342,152,252,0.16399999999999998,0.716,0.12,-0.8414,0,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,4,0,9,17,0,3,12,0,17,6,3,3,2,38,39,17,0,2,10,0,0,2,0,3,3,5,0,1,22,9,0,2,6,4,0,3,5,11,0,1,3,6,20,6,27,31,4,33,0,2,1,0,6,13,0,5,17,124,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122246474152802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117364877885203,0.0,0.0,0.09131890372448473,0.0,0.0,0.1517046560909113,0.0,0.09389570725504533,0.0,0.0,0.1195427731622226,0.0,0.0,0.12616586716427838,0.10325744020014874,0.0,0.08185933682758255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11567526905340267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14858461010948176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566010560732227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350287008757222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14031750676799953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23749686153249885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14188025038168658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437556552177705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13983792713337076,0.07379992732938931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14590184250704916,0.0,0.0948499849659626,0.1312104528373896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896367699458634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272448314165856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021303515748347,0.14288948843374005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17205375909610593,0.0,0.13259096161100958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590433160979545,0.0,0.24449737696015605,0.1400893068095429,0.1517046560909113,0.0,0.11108254653173076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033797183580739,0.0,0.0,0.19009626686068387,0.0,0.0,0.2245377724686732,0.0,0.14038460535190955,0.0,0.0,0.15238585916883135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363226167199758,0.0,0.0,0.08921347450321708,0.08604487589177752,0.0,0.10660787264262754,0.07830309117868804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117764927922362,0.0,0.0,0.1159797583382976,0.1478967638512433,0.11079979378697802,0.07920520492015377,0.2131795297430069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944665522466867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684863492324392,0.09539273232698964,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GettingSuckedIn,2020/02/18,"How do I find a psychologists that I can see anonymously, no insurance? Online? USA I absolutely do not want to see a psychologist that can tie anything back to my medical records.  So no insurance.  I have a couple of reasons that I won't get into, but I can't have any form of diagnosis on my medical records.  Let's just leave it at that.

So any recommendations on where to start?  Would online be best?  In person?  What's a reasonable price to pay per session?  I can't afford once a week at $200 an hour.   Am i being snobby by wanting someone with a PHD instead of an LCSW? I know a PHD will cost more.

Nothing too serious, definitely not a harm to myself or others... just looking to improve myself.  I think i have mild depression.  I spent this past weekend in bed and got nothing done.  It's happens more often than not. I routinely have low energy.  No Drive.   No get up and go.  Serious Procrastinator.  I let chores/tasks pile up, etc.  I also have a parent who i'm pretty sure is bpd that stresses me out like nothing else and uses all of my mental energy with her 20 phone calls a day... i need some coping strategies.",1.3185550935550945,3.8031642027027033,3.8454054054054048,82.70089397089396,84.90090090090091,6.838808038808041,23.85377685377685,8.012643519586192,1.7057839223839228,871,34,169,19,26,303,141,222,0.13,0.72,0.149,0.8502,2,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,1,11,9,0,1,12,0,21,2,0,4,2,29,38,9,0,4,7,1,0,1,0,3,2,0,1,1,11,7,0,0,5,1,4,2,10,6,0,0,3,3,23,3,24,28,7,21,0,2,3,0,6,12,0,3,8,121,34,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599618027289577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802702761395434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907323285206327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191891546630716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13909778917895033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16693577440759105,0.0,0.13534325377042766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466585099145298,0.0,0.08548055310001558,0.0,0.11416080529759115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563954296878908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072433098514704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14782270005754725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114371921312038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13849857291649315,0.0,0.07532837207379124,0.0,0.10600833637531117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720909654125412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305301155726711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284325991738858,0.0,0.0,0.1403460059702221,0.0,0.2710724640686693,0.0,0.06475478679845549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113044089311576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26705026510568497,0.13357417457350726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09828043029557364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3815414767550845,0.0,0.0,0.14115608809282212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717552527682826,0.0,0.1265291903238859,0.0,0.11573317239498705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348459051777974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.272556649232049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112423920611796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230493953892164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381602582380646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182983773102554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12492208406532815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492947738511084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11447631437474527,0.0,0.0,0.15635693794270647,0.0,0.10631959564348603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415615768984097,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,usernam_xyz,2020/02/18,"How do I go about getting therapy free? (Florida) I’m disabled, I can’t work, and I’ve been on the verge of a breakdown for like 3 years. Please help me figure this out.",-0.8216666666666654,1.3226468333333372,1.6402222222222242,96.12700000000002,94.55555555555556,5.102222222222223,21.088888888888885,6.742157984588678,0.480228888888889,130,5,30,2,5,44,33,36,0.0,0.698,0.302,0.8689,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,4,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,3,5,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,16,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399393285764791,0.0,0.2610025307487091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30782579766909074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22436650052564125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5041189226605141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.525192745795667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343396903906563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957421381626125
mentalhealth,byepappi,2020/02/18,"Self destruct mode Does anyone know how to avoid going into self destruct the only thing holding me together is my medication and I kee hitting setbacks in referrals for therapy or home treatment teams and most days the medication doesn't help so I get rid of it and allow myself to decline and eventually lose control, I'm not sure on how to avoid these as I know it's doing more damage over time. I have EUPD, anxiety, depression and schizoaffective disorder so I'm not really doing well on good days but I really want to avoid these self destruct episodes any tips would be great.",4.934111111111111,7.0617778454545475,5.911212121212124,74.45126262626263,70.54545454545455,9.252525252525249,30.40404040404041,9.725611199111238,3.28919191919192,473,20,79,12,9,156,77,110,0.23800000000000002,0.674,0.08900000000000001,-0.9067,0,3,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,5,13,3,3,2,0,7,2,0,4,1,24,15,12,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,3,5,6,0,5,2,1,0,1,3,9,1,0,0,0,8,4,12,12,2,9,0,3,0,0,5,5,0,2,3,50,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159077472020849,0.0,0.13038917370713807,0.0,0.0,0.11917838975284055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19116741016633731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198445257107508,0.0,0.14680314519046858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953435609613881,0.0,0.14915667038955874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904994168327604,0.0,0.09686723839835908,0.1429603188662772,0.0,0.18791508323207964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424500307502992,0.0,0.17096920323521825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18734310140724064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906832092055301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3434087447024187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963032284871848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21838154862926645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5334307124968971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16064142852472724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19491753879221446,0.0,0.11323540283550287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938725200714063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053227201098132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15324960226872295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107850896712305,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_DoYouHaveFood,2020/02/18,"Not understood Hi, so I need advice of what I can do.
I got PDD NOS and as it's not known a lot my parents don't understand what it means and how it affects me and my behavior. I was diagnosed as a child and never got help for it, I just recievied the label. I would figure that when I got diagnosed my parents got explained what it means and all that, but lately I feel like they have no idea what it means.

To be fair, I had no one around me who knew what it means, so I myself had to do a little research and so much about me got explained, I felt understood by multiple internet pages.

I also started to notice more and more how they don't understand what it means. 'Just explain it to them/show them an explanation' I tried. Multiple times. But they always say they understand it and know what it means.
But later they keep showing me they don't by literally telling me so. They make me feel like they don't even believe me when I say something happens because of pdd nos. 

I live in a constant state of not being understood and believed by my parents. I know no one who is diagnosed with pdd nos, with who i can share experiences and ask for help. 

My question now is, what is there left for me to do? I really need them to understand me, but how do you explain something to someone who won't listen.",3.6727408142999,4.709723169811326,4.900039721946378,84.77351539225424,72.01886792452831,8.295928500496524,28.664349553128105,8.6894789155246,2.0517924528301883,1020,39,213,18,19,338,117,265,0.051,0.9,0.049,0.0859,3,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,10,0,17,3,0,0,6,0,21,3,0,5,2,61,57,26,0,3,9,3,3,2,0,2,3,3,0,1,25,13,0,1,27,1,0,0,12,0,0,2,13,6,44,3,23,40,6,14,0,0,0,0,33,4,0,2,11,162,69,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823237377472806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737110423415049,0.07009901342443918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499636534623799,0.07875817992111188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05135528120458732,0.0,0.0,0.18983168221593605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103946798238192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565222591223189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05564336508444887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240827462253064,0.0,0.0,0.08519412271068431,0.12037001893336315,0.08088890144944709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3368941532252661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449802662644296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293597961121903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951029268489499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488128049572293,0.0,0.0,0.09259825861677023,0.0,0.09503260521346052,0.0,0.09153299355452643,0.0,0.0,0.08231620195797745,0.08443613351592957,0.07439032913728671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162252029872733,0.0,0.0,0.05623453237272776,0.0,0.0,0.5506083494950088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619301435606487,0.12493395698926656,0.06497533119563621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095914071972055,0.0,0.0,0.11417387628331865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28063400856369825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437425214487276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396983119529495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399082248316824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138094757949863,0.12971261954668126,0.0,0.0,0.0596294058742193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363428936551818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04912423460184927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05719717154474056,0.0,0.0,0.35081018963816674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059845593470234264,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dannidae08,2020/02/18,"Is this possible OCD? I want to start off saying that I have been officially diagnosed with  excoriation disorder, Major depression, PTSD, General anxiety disorder, Binge eating disorder. I have previously been misdiagnosed and medicated for Bipolar disorder and had an episode of psychosis. My spouse and I after talking to a therapist also believe much of this is from an undiagnosed Autism spectrum disorder but my office does not do testing for adults without families as there is no background interview available.   
I have recently been diagnosed with the skin picking disorder and told to try to put band aids over my fingers to prevent the behavior and also keep my hands busy. My problem is however that it is not only my hands but my mind that can not stop thinking about it, like an itch that needs to be scratched. It is not just my skin either it is any imperfection on my skin or my spouses etc. Or sometimes it extends beyond skin. For example if I know I have locked my door behind me but my mind says to check the door again sometimes twice I get horrible anxiety if I try to ignore the voice. I will think about it all day. It feels irrational, like I feel like my house will burn down if I don't check the stove if 'the voice' tells me too more than once etc. I'm not looking for a diagnosis just a possible explanation that I can bring up to my irl therapist or if anyone else has similar issues and has advice.",8.286388443017657,7.840872494382026,8.597669876939541,67.38985955056182,61.88389513108614,12.722204387372924,39.67067950775817,12.031772070788634,5.0123196361690745,1144,55,199,34,14,379,150,267,0.129,0.8140000000000001,0.057999999999999996,-0.9576,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,12,0,24,13,8,1,1,45,38,20,0,8,20,2,10,3,0,2,5,4,3,1,14,8,1,4,5,1,2,2,8,3,0,1,5,15,29,3,31,30,7,14,0,1,1,0,10,6,0,8,9,147,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088489087622703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875455425331308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06324762011050633,0.0,0.1422994601175986,0.0,0.0,0.0650323183947961,0.09529616649466227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478649412159294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05998150848918363,0.0,0.0801063758218506,0.18879931164143735,0.0,0.0,0.6395611492566655,0.0,0.08139062878427795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951688848214721,0.07769500966113384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074537006802358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767826577985156,0.0,0.09405377789849208,0.06644387351016183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048592065831689964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731703200244673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707463870085742,0.0,0.08266846468290652,0.0,0.0,0.05111394878320994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631485711804994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810204902834887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369427994185772,0.0,0.0,0.18782013567175904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837049062005883,0.06896315302495974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904890398092217,0.0,0.07073564634159812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097017442807029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899467486859508,0.10871963992410978,0.09349723700600106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183271401681717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14792502883168615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18397164470145608,0.0,0.06583049062385038,0.0,0.0,0.07775761181061028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475511441978445,0.08129179428511442,0.0,0.0,0.21597546676772647,0.0,0.11918963984232868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887171160581858,0.0,0.12629063831456805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05485765276682269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965496233865057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elterynne,2020/02/18,"What Are These Episodes Called? I'm not asking for a diagnosis or anything, I'm just wondering if there is a common name I can use when talking to my therapists about them.

We've just been calling them panic attacks as they manifest those symptoms (high heart rate, trouble breathing, panic) but they're combined with heavy suicidal thoughts, feelings of worthlessness, an entire loss of will to live. They last at most 2 hours long and afterwards I am... fine. It's like a switch is flipped and I'm okay. I struggle with mild (mostly seasonal) depression and moderate anxiety but these have always been kind of strange to me, especially since they're more or less a recent phenomena (five years at most), and they happen at odd times. Depending on my mental state they happen anywhere between once a month and twice a week, and absolutely exhaust all my energy for the next day or so. I've had them while driving, before going to bed, in the middle of work. Can panic attacks manifest with deep depressive and suicidal thoughts, or is this something different altogether?",9.183160621761658,8.836083093264254,8.505911917098446,68.45482642487049,60.03626943005181,12.072331606217615,40.54352331606218,11.407655852321104,4.823721658031088,859,41,141,21,10,271,133,193,0.239,0.713,0.048,-0.9922,1,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,7,2,6,16,2,4,9,1,12,4,2,2,1,31,24,18,2,1,10,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,6,10,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,12,0,2,5,1,14,4,21,18,6,26,0,4,0,0,12,8,0,10,16,91,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056689890819479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714988570176383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450505133167427,0.0,0.11872203113341664,0.2889474913481239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806234390151348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25934967384450835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819004750844153,0.0,0.21875909433932866,0.0,0.0,0.13268145937820608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421186535146628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217348550565217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22460034107902985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048822773783693,0.0,0.13417588940957184,0.0,0.0,0.12506328153629429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224446810486296,0.0,0.10351687138247334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204274083929112,0.0,0.11213782467685778,0.11238548932033383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279798499171957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136521483917392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13505931406385407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352442193762268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4469994768206229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253910262631165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505055804933196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776600774448617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276146068132058,0.0,0.2778211427664829,0.0,0.0,0.13199515105570928,0.0,0.10207278109843183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744955387413175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016377345177458,0.07405108797140518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968184216396712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186674136041418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13771932530884182,0.0924529763338075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177982359351303
mentalhealth,SquareVanilla,2020/02/18,"Do you have to act on your thoughts to have an eating disorder? I’m constantly feeling bad about the way I look, and I have thoughts of starving myself all the time. I usually find an excuse not to do it (I’m paying for a meal plan so I should use it, or my boyfriend would be sad, or something like that). The thoughts are absolutely still there and even when I do eat I feel horrible and keep thinking about how I should stop eating so much even though I know I don’t eat that much. 
This has been a really big problem recently, because I’m currently doing a section in my biology class on digestion and every class he talks about BMIs and obesity and I spend the entire class period thinking about my own weight. 
I’ve been diagnosed with anxiety and depression, but never had any kind of diagnosis for this. I just want to know if this is a normal thing that other people experience or if it’s a concern. I don’t usually act on my thoughts, so I don’t know if it would really count as an eating disorder because I still eat normally.",5.8757246376811585,5.804559821256043,6.870833333333334,76.52625000000002,66.72946859903382,10.957971014492754,33.19202898550725,10.686352973137794,3.4649971014492764,821,33,163,21,12,276,115,207,0.11,0.861,0.028999999999999998,-0.9265,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,1,16,6,0,0,12,0,21,11,0,2,2,43,39,21,0,11,9,0,3,1,0,4,3,0,0,0,12,8,10,2,12,0,2,2,5,4,0,0,7,4,21,2,18,27,5,21,0,2,1,0,5,6,0,6,13,117,33,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849388360218127,0.0,0.07705145775381497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409801172454319,0.12279744192585748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884385714870644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867510393552814,0.10222991832061387,0.0,0.0,0.23087048881378394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6183777199637421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305083201270734,0.0,0.08486197207469841,0.0,0.0,0.09852468022574463,0.0,0.0,0.10185535051704814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205737052841477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952564835908261,0.0,0.10488565142153924,0.1660612455751582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049207300556018435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458045766612096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14808337193311813,0.0,0.0776824142713173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19737082127863464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982741209049044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637660501712622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904918552681535,0.0,0.0994500538320717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754011609039553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16087219308993486,0.0842074500705968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095590153100336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691470319010334,0.1290761818971628,0.0989580874401315,0.31984559262300755,0.0587313534672452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699079537572815,0.22186038848931688,0.0,0.059407985260705024,0.07994781639428647,0.0,0.12265131172807114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309892996989615,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YourCheeseSandwich,2020/02/18,"Pros and Cons of Punishment Pros
- Good for dangerous behaviors 
- Temporary suppression provides opportunity to reinforce more desirable behavior

Cons
- Frequently ineffective
- May be replaced by even less desirable behavior 
- Physical punishment has harmful side-effects (fear, lowered self esteem)
- Doesn't relay information about alternative, more desirable behavior",32.675714285714285,20.55443738775511,27.36081632653061,-13.82653061224488,32.265306122448976,35.110204081632645,97.9795918367347,28.03038370184959,19.638616326530613,308,24,23,19,1,99,41,49,0.198,0.5870000000000001,0.214,0.2451,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,2,8,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,7,4,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,14,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3533344754375437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6019760712645991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4486970869332049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5580774876930353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mamakeysh9,2020/02/18,Anxiety Ive been having really bad panic attacks im on buspar but it doesnt seem to be helping at all i see my med dr in 2 days and was wondering what meds have helped others with bad panics so i can explore my options when i see my dr,1.7244339622641505,2.6011425283018887,4.7171226415094365,84.84285377358493,76.54716981132076,7.564150943396226,24.57075471698113,8.07648339933343,1.3743622641509434,186,6,41,3,4,68,44,53,0.29100000000000004,0.6609999999999999,0.047,-0.924,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,2,0,0,8,2,0,0,1,8,12,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,2,2,7,0,5,9,1,6,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,3,2,27,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15799273090446958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23495448767808924,0.0,0.0,0.34488314493540695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331929484784284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768616368189374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22308479957584013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.458810287667289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4846303046446586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323066028648213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32915085387134146,0.18801459221177816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22396992180372588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,charlie_com,2020/02/18,"Having paranoia of no one being real but me Im (14) on the autism spectrum so this could just be a problem that my mind is creating but im afraid no one else is real and im the only person alive.
     Im afraid that everyone around me isn't real or doesnt exist so it doesn't matter what i do in life because its only I that exists, making nothing really matter. 
    Lots of paranoia is overtaking me, ruining my happiness and will to stay alive
         This thought has been creeping up on me for the past few weeks or months, slowly. 
   I used to go to therapy for unrelated reason, problems with my mum, depression, and anxiety but she wont let me go anymore so i cant say anything to anyone about my thoughts.
    I know that if i say anything to my friend or even family, they will make jokes that would increase my stress, or think im crazy. 
    My mum normally just tells me the thoughts i have are just hormones or the teen angst and dismisses them. I don't have a father or any other family near i can talk to 
         Sometimes though, i get these moments of clarity i guess, where i think things like ""there are billions of people on this earth, someone has to be real, it cant just be me"" 
   I dont know if this is a normal thing others experience but i want to live normally without having this constant pang of  stress and fear on my mind.
     I hope someone can help me with this because im tired of this.   
      Also sorry for any grammarical errors or the writing skills being poor",2.9491214689265526,4.55409471864407,4.523750000000003,84.52234816384181,74.6949152542373,7.3573446327683625,25.850988700564972,8.07648339933343,1.592166666666667,1142,40,228,18,24,383,154,295,0.16899999999999998,0.7090000000000001,0.122,-0.9111,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,2,2,14,14,0,5,9,0,34,2,0,4,0,57,50,23,0,11,18,3,0,1,1,4,2,2,0,1,21,8,0,0,8,1,1,3,11,9,0,3,4,2,34,5,29,35,3,18,0,2,0,0,14,9,0,12,6,164,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646062519449583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987742056811353,0.0,0.061802711306127064,0.0,0.08012013337281478,0.05648895078027996,0.0,0.1329635227222134,0.07191857888621538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849540909041288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730328636090963,0.0,0.06450276156519727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958271260630973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468310657158706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748813028588517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335980914335282,0.0,0.0,0.07719653653101262,0.0,0.07902630976788623,0.1523197500070878,0.0909091257844784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06241672194632751,0.0,0.042208472384679833,0.0,0.09182753137468247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899725202506135,0.0,0.0,0.08600048470038868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054150591973780866,0.0,0.0,0.0802408586883739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5235903722674685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879810556566424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261135384252774,0.05706305739514681,0.03946900784322746,0.0,0.07133741388308297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868319354348511,0.0,0.0,0.10785343086710872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314599665812465,0.0,0.06448432814857416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23746569325223515,0.07751840588729111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948827840279787,0.12288605244993295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712142765343469,0.05600832893351555,0.0705410937912051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15460669194784124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3678183921181378,0.05175495564851732,0.08306367033332678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849195414065498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690306952259498,0.0,0.07990154310213939,0.09043571631130777,0.0,0.08610941546636484,0.0,0.0,0.1850850988018304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493445233487652,0.07061240133459447,0.0,0.09238828681845218,0.0,0.10734411012978863,0.10353156499355816,0.07937394421543069,0.19241029371476884,0.0,0.09285409052693902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977502009208007,0.0,0.0,0.04765094223235791,0.0,0.06480337843443586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787689074854126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738958168320511,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,woahthatwasclose,2020/02/18,"Just Needed To Talk Hi, I’m woahthatwasclose and I have an ED, body dysmorphia and depression. I feel... okay? Still some shitty days here and there but... it’s getting better. I don’t want to punch the mirror everytime I see myself anymore. And I’ve been noticing that laughing ironically suprisingly makes me feel better. 
The reason I’m not dead yet is the future. That game I’m waiting for to come out (Animal Crossing New Horizons, SO FUCKING EXCITED), a sudden urge to get inspired and draw for hours. Small things like that makes me feel seperated from my dark thoughts. 
I gained weight. Even though I don’t see my face or body accurately, it’s... not that bad! 
Recovery from a bloody eating disorder feels amazing. And this time I know I’m dedicated. Actually you know what? My skin is glowing, serotonin is my bitch. Those useless numbing antidepressants can suck my positivity.
With this great mindset I feel like I can put a bandaid on my old manipulative therapists wounds. I’m currently searching for a new one! The issue is my social life. I lost a really close friend of mine on Valentine’s Day. We were supposed to go out like “friends”. And guess who had a crush on that particular friend? MY DUMB ASS. She said that her intentions were NEVER ROMANTICALLY and that’s ok!!!!! But I panicked and blocked her everywhere. The thing I did is really toxic and I know I need to explain myself buT I don’t know how. Please help! 
Thank you for reading. :)",1.988098604826547,4.838183430147058,3.1814705882352925,84.67514328808448,89.6985294117647,6.466214177978884,24.253770739064866,7.702957570686157,1.774090761689291,1151,47,211,25,39,370,168,272,0.142,0.64,0.217,0.9706,1,0,0,0,0,0,50.0,1,2,0,4,9,25,4,0,12,2,16,12,5,6,1,49,50,17,1,3,7,0,7,3,3,0,4,1,0,0,16,16,2,2,13,2,0,4,6,9,0,1,8,11,34,16,19,42,1,24,0,3,3,2,17,7,5,3,16,125,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.11240689530586477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142355678159734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617718859374033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037488930618169,0.0,0.255895854661089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992242831907902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857349236438155,0.0,0.09921127624401288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201545487247324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11786610522557515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608060345679786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912126296174,0.08229034732764456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669819447094095,0.1064894720294146,0.120361976610108,0.0,0.06546400852151645,0.0,0.0,0.12699520305757706,0.1268925947968251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720810439632729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343700073317943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202263702187297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25321730214988103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136070783254443,0.1688251503947463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257413351329761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15377780087652074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082092043792454,0.08884010518894501,0.22249862263154127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114232873151846,0.12087045442737444,0.0,0.0780543861200114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126441859985945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11579577921841405,0.0,0.0,0.1152191954681254,0.0,0.14758479540437106,0.11843247316193335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10957018857132696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18357988329353506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741968445012772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198930472326404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925837704085848,0.0,0.10604965645679047,0.0,0.13374217392554813,0.15305160957879194,0.0,0.11317164869223392,0.09144642439151177,0.06716706308451728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794088094624341,0.0,0.0,0.14026798134036872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ccoyle13,2020/02/18,Anxious Extrovert Haha does anyone else feel the need to constantly be surrounded by people even if you're not in the mood to actually talk. At this point I'll even just sit in the library since I don't always want to be particularly noticed or spoken to sometimes but I really hate being completely alone.,8.538390804597704,8.013004793103452,9.243103448275862,63.228908045977036,61.41379310344828,12.560919540229886,36.574712643678154,11.855464076750405,4.617533333333332,250,10,41,7,3,85,48,58,0.18100000000000002,0.7859999999999999,0.033,-0.8418,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,8,8,3,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,8,5,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,1,25,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.2267253910885727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406289339225831,0.0,0.0,0.19332128576723576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624723557436213,0.0,0.162453995233187,0.2380546066877368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24359876892434495,0.2510715364759069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20331787558730532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19408603353962944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069100792448829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747552881036084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293826572165682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17227341742254182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26451487419000314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16107179680102054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196316198191761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883971470670615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921898669524788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22978520087455065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867420276774232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703716984197764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,multicm,2020/02/18,"The fear of being Fired I'm posting this more for curiosity of if I am unusual for this or if this is truly a common fear.

I work a job where I have been told by many different departments that I am valuable, and this has been reflected in a perfect annual review the past 2 years (since I started working here). Everyone at my company appreciates me and I feel their appreciation. But for some reason I live in a constant fear of being fired. I have no guilty conscience, I do my job and I do with well with minimal wasted time on my phone at work.

I feel like my fear isn't necessarily directed at me or my company I think I may just have a misunderstanding about how common firings are. I have this impression that they are common and that companies are always looking for you to slip up so they would have an excuse to fire you. In my two years at this company I have never made a mistake but every time I almost make one I think ""Glad I caught that or I would have been fired""

Are firings really that common, and do any of you think about your ability to be fired on a daily basis?",4.330978593272172,5.251229284403671,5.9917614678899085,77.99008868501532,70.37614678899081,9.483058103975537,27.83608562691132,9.725611199111238,2.505569663608563,856,29,170,20,15,294,114,218,0.145,0.742,0.114,-0.8347,3,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,4,3,4,8,11,0,4,10,0,28,0,0,4,2,33,40,14,0,5,8,0,9,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,0,7,0,0,2,3,5,1,2,6,10,34,6,26,28,2,27,0,0,1,0,10,11,0,8,14,133,45,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196562255825986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965732349639844,0.0,0.0,0.08961966467037183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241490577103555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376893432918795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11103621346357308,0.1259281057355138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5931879599034521,0.133270912352389,0.09414864390118206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615564825507331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643844609655647,0.0,0.11637031662370027,0.0,0.11066787069236854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470002570272967,0.08796883161147333,0.133611311597167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164224236744332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930226742729519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580558315739904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621549628968068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442611314077596,0.13549896317320995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901555061304867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932795018134682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25333132383927026,0.0,0.0,0.15369209414208107,0.0,0.0,0.1259281057355138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873672877327347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849232081307988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878274701628567,0.0,0.0,0.1872353770020817,0.0,0.0,0.169732986928031
mentalhealth,fkejfjsjnddn,2020/02/18,"empty feeling it chest for the past year or so there's been a constant physical feeling of emptiness in my chest, like there's a hole. it only goes away when someone hugs me or i put a soft object directly where i feel it. could this be a medical thing or am i just lonely ?",1.085789473684212,3.2631308245614083,3.0202631578947354,90.32934210526315,82.85964912280701,5.905263157894738,23.535087719298247,7.1686216300943375,0.9705929824561408,215,8,45,3,6,72,44,57,0.127,0.721,0.153,0.128,0,2,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,5,0,4,4,2,0,0,8,7,5,0,1,4,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,4,5,2,4,4,0,8,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,3,5,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925100663632392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33644320447127,0.0,0.24857616136611074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4722619367533232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15210285923466554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136378860174007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23678477062228906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972050805264834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3129782926047068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637936630571017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20683755388018085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20048993368136991
mentalhealth,KiddPix,2020/02/18,"My depression is impacting my college attendance. This is my third semester in a row at a new university. I failed out of the other two. While I have good grades right now, I’m not too optimistic my attendance will keep up. I have these stints of depression where I can barely get out of bed before noon. It’s probably fatigue from my insomnia + general apathy toward life and it has impacted work and school to where I feel like a failure. I have disappointed my family in so many ways. I want to do better, but I don’t know how. I’ve invested so much into finishing my degree, and for what if I’m unable to show up or study when it matters...

Has anybody else had this problem in the past?",3.409683794466403,5.019332695652178,5.3780895915678535,78.84918972332021,73.4927536231884,9.945718050065878,27.76284584980237,10.230975488527342,3.04455652173913,544,21,107,17,11,188,96,138,0.147,0.8009999999999999,0.051,-0.8976,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,8,9,0,0,5,0,12,3,0,1,0,18,19,11,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,8,6,0,1,2,1,1,2,2,6,0,2,1,1,15,3,18,17,1,23,0,5,0,0,0,13,0,2,8,77,23,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19350010091362926,0.0,0.0,0.20111624859087454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3917174595899303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18996298044339205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21437187227714946,0.0,0.1149799456199569,0.16245414344169976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880677654264972,0.0,0.0,0.19073178866776885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20212299359169733,0.0,0.0,0.12497273757270233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606188882411748,0.11109583764259663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305472525172217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16716468958829933,0.0,0.0,0.21962371244252987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170784135082183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451749639167328,0.2175904701648537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19419780523837624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301402858224877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22213612576618308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13412603029673467,0.18049902208938493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655494375234126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fireyrose04,2020/02/18,I asked my mom to take me to the mental hospital because I’m suicidal and she said “you always throw suicide in my face to get what you want” I don’t even know what I would want other than to be content again.,6.985333333333332,4.312996088888891,7.607222222222222,80.5975,65.8888888888889,10.777777777777779,33.611111111111114,8.841846274778883,2.499444444444444,164,5,37,2,2,55,35,45,0.18899999999999997,0.7559999999999999,0.055,-0.8555,0,0,0,0,0,1,1.0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,5,11,1,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,9,0,6,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,25,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265581336978409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545443278684579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597889323764325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983786547565372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14225466133614328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963754574448435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2743934261137264,0.0,0.0,0.3188901469221207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589999019082658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5956585764075286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20472009765391413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32119469228043324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19341935505655716,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlueSeyeZ,2020/02/18,"Suicidal I don't know I try to be positive and after a while things don't go the way I wanted it to be and I would be back to being suicidal. I tried to cut myself but I'm scared it would become a thing I'm addicted to. For now, I just slam my head at the wall or punch myself in the face. 

I think I also have a mental problem but I'm not so sure because I was never diagnosed. I'm thinking of anxiety and ADHD. For anxiety my whole body shakes when doing something Infront of people even though I know I'm doing the right thing it just happens. For ADHD maybe because I'm always forgetful and lose focus like in class I will always try to focus but it just fades away and I would be thinking about something else like my current problem or my future. Also, I feel very uncomfortable sitting at chair for hours. Maybe I'm just overreacting? If I'm just overreacting please give me some advice in how to avoid it I've been googling it and it seems just to come back to me nothing helps. Thank you.",2.668580810965164,4.277927451456314,4.315494003426615,85.7054911479155,75.45631067961166,6.9829811536265005,24.253569388920607,7.724431198458867,1.202672529982867,789,25,161,11,17,265,109,206,0.21600000000000005,0.73,0.054000000000000006,-0.9864,1,1,2,0,0,1,13.0,0,1,0,1,17,11,1,3,7,0,16,5,3,1,2,39,37,19,2,7,13,0,1,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,7,0,0,3,4,7,0,0,2,1,22,4,23,26,2,24,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,5,13,111,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387389085083902,0.2731232792704138,0.111038295971413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18174035379290415,0.1890991641759864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738538652219829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675948609311264,0.17474950236270173,0.0,0.13853605460907242,0.1254958314559373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621774030034108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788251414896412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533244768809288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492360495875768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505179684697343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745493627617952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090046182838538,0.06457876574461363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048297315201088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661755617755624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616405105650248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190303897616964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248965745249586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102813169527688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712333398082792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283139870406126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145127007505567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763875710174449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090314179146376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877700074908002,0.0,0.0,0.12473203888304192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174578624162389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703972692615552,0.0,0.0,0.1137638371959749,0.0,0.0,0.10344483378136178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17495644190338594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24858639390794698,0.0,0.1070952920007492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046155907084252,0.0,0.0,0.22647293371692026,0.2184292852960957,0.11164127518139008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23144271518171125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375696699740814,0.06702214444549415,0.09019450962636677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12686426557281946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24215929337655376,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hahabri,2020/02/18,"I don’t want to live like this anymore. I’d always been overweight all my life. Only when I turned 16 last year did i decide to do something about it. By March 2019, i was a whopping 85kg, mind you i’m 166cm. So I did what anybody who’s trying to lose weight would do– i dieted, i exercised. Everything was normal, i started off with cutting out junk foods and sweet drinks, strictly drinking plain water. But even then my weight wasn’t dropping as fast as i’d like it to. So then i added in exercise in the mix which is healthy, but I also started depending on laxatives. Only then did my weight start dropping dramatically. 

I started challenging myself more, counting my calories and making sure that I had a negative net intake. I didn’t think anything was wrong with me, i thought that eating only 400 calories day by day was alright. Even when my period went missing up till this day, when my hair is falling out in clumps in the shower, when random bruises appear all over my leg, when I have sudden moments where i pass out– i still feel like I’m not allowed to say that I have a problem.

Fast forward almost a year and i’ve dropped 35kg. I’ve gone from overweight with a bmi of 30.8 to underweight with a bmi of 18.1. if you can’t already tell, i’ve gotten addicted to not only laxatives but numbers as well. Everyone was happy for me, congratulating me on my weight loss, asking me how did i do it, thoughtlessly poking me in my belly and saying “oh no you’ve still got a bit of a pouch there”. Can’t they tell that I’m not functioning well? Every time I hear anything related to my physique, i feel like an absolute failure. Mind you, they were the same people urging me to lose weight, constantly reminding that i’m fat when i was at my heaviest. 

Anyways, i guess the main thing that’s been bugging me lately is how I don’t want to live like this anymore. I want to get out of this restrictive mindset and for once actually love my body for what it is. I don’t want to keep blacking out, i want my hair to be healthy again, i want to stop dehydrating myself by my constant abuse of laxatives. I want a fresh new start where I never started starving myself in the first place. I’m not saying that i’m anorexic or anything, but i’d really like to get rid of my disordered thoughts and eat without worrying about the calories. 

I know some of yall will suggest that I go to a therapist or an equivalent to that. But i’m still considered a minor and i would need parental consent to seek help. My parents are very conservative people and they don’t believe in things like eating disorders. They in fact encourage and enforce it in the household, for eg. It’s become a bit of a challenge to see who will be able to lose the most weight or who will burn the most calories or who will be able to run the longest for them at least. I’d just like to hear your thoughts on this and i hope if you’ve read this far, that you didn’t mind my venting.",5.048491673491674,5.390583065656568,5.768724178724178,82.29771089271091,68.51178451178451,8.778523978523978,31.54226954226954,8.685302888712808,2.370837164437164,2327,92,470,35,37,760,268,594,0.085,0.77,0.145,0.9807,4,0,3,0,1,0,56.0,0,6,5,7,26,27,1,0,25,1,41,26,5,5,5,81,88,39,0,15,17,2,10,8,0,6,7,5,1,0,31,18,17,4,8,5,0,8,17,8,2,1,24,18,72,19,71,55,11,76,0,5,2,1,29,26,0,15,49,305,103,3,0.12090359053288045,0.07162549224001688,0.058992231903741726,0.06590137986053589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06053374071560558,0.0,0.06671005930563319,0.04834327883394017,0.050300736354028514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990387404470752,0.0,0.0,0.14924003003252342,0.0,0.05651426818160937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667642584154407,0.0,0.06810847209053937,0.0,0.0,0.13199540710649585,0.06714831665929631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13065382957861366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169592206838281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13856598934653722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11843949024458225,0.0,0.18557183509440392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985568127804818,0.0,0.05093324477652658,0.05776428098185661,0.05433017563121576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06113248811985216,0.08637354923436945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05142026617182012,0.07309855079286294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316713594175542,0.0,0.03435614836208658,0.0,0.04834882305116656,0.0,0.06659446788164496,0.0,0.0,0.06435206015769097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13626713353586642,0.0,0.0405195640979402,0.0,0.0,0.06004227282448886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053732333225024284,0.0,0.0,0.033222725727409724,0.04927628153578325,0.0681922581554078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042698890768666384,0.2362695490324622,0.0,0.10676008549699503,0.0,0.0,0.2028902877983242,0.0,0.0,0.054560105423628456,0.0,0.040352042756232144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18311724104822344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044824240208148916,0.046624151244444266,0.058384720567307466,0.0,0.0,0.05922992422966565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437918902559236,0.0,0.18390525744940395,0.0,0.0,0.1342491293114772,0.0,0.0,0.08381932649375047,0.0,0.06315925954468174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057844203876702735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06046815438077105,0.0,0.03872696800436709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422108185980945,0.0,0.0,0.04817225410703529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04653874540360707,0.0,0.0,0.2567285509996144,0.0,0.14483064536563953,0.0505404076949515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056975101621009425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056750671672041,0.0,0.0,0.0701891936260502,0.08032297325662331,0.03873506947022611,0.0,0.14397591873148866,0.03524992796032113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0410428008258542,0.06575419407988646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987906211897332,0.24959224570108104,0.0,0.0,0.4416840049563589,0.10870684782656498,0.05603941985261048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058273373409503636,0.0,0.0,0.06139173249304253,0.0,0.08588644182108066,0.06609454824204668,0.0,0.07785794832325145
mentalhealth,thesensitivesoul,2020/02/18,"Any reasons as to why I should keep living? I’ve had suicidal thoughts for a long time, and the conclusion I’ve come to is that I’ll continue living for the sake of my friends and family. I don’t want them to be hurt. But living for the sake of other people is hard because I just find it so difficult to be me. I’ve had issues with mental illness forever, lately my anxiety has been so bad it prevents me from sleeping and I cry all the time. I’m tired of feeling tired and bad. Is there really anything worth sticking around for in this world besides the feelings of those around me? I need something to keep me going or else I think i’ll break",2.7471838687628187,4.387343609022558,4.119439507860562,87.06347915242651,75.31578947368422,7.242378673957622,26.376623376623375,8.00094639256281,1.5817879699248123,512,19,105,8,11,169,84,133,0.23800000000000002,0.6970000000000001,0.065,-0.9809,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,6,5,0,0,6,0,11,4,1,1,1,25,22,9,1,3,3,0,3,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,6,8,0,3,7,0,1,2,1,4,0,0,4,3,13,1,19,15,1,12,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,66,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161034994338787,0.0,0.11430547041960948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295947614764498,0.26602997887193514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495179993152509,0.09108470997724144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871162584007592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16413024984156918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482077755224975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408593596526515,0.0,0.15110192714074835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656667051600002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154410965691341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491851691799424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13385047840306294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15995661179955867,0.0,0.0,0.15595508561093746,0.0,0.2656217454834281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685516480723025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3958203360383532,0.1322315114660554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057966196609202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079262903208498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358863310139317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572192589814912,0.15362808057401506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952735913424706,0.0,0.0,0.11503039273341915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16344062675443655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574195039153408,0.0,0.11862235313971554,0.17425536601535446,0.3434713550185147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813146304905431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13482781309157682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,downbutmaybeup31,2020/02/18,"Accepting my life the way it is is hard. I just want to find someone I’m in love with, start a family, finish school, start a career I love, and be content with an imperfect but satisfying life. Yet, my physical and mental health always seem to get in the way. I’ll probably just end up alone.",4.146355932203388,4.9154147796610195,5.762500000000002,80.01968220338985,70.6949152542373,9.967796610169492,26.614406779661017,10.125756701596842,2.492894915254237,228,7,47,6,4,78,43,59,0.086,0.72,0.19399999999999998,0.7783,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,0,3,5,0,0,0,11,11,3,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,7,10,0,10,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,5,26,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241279955901732,0.0,0.0,0.18006443189357133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19166861352196246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040052626735008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19778820207449085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306151034889612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19385436702911066,0.0,0.0,0.230026014315643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057033382029129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3906238794602537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21808308349853628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333187763091185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21901114620239134,0.0,0.19700494508617428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18335735620276372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063419745405178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763995458631786,0.343540876165404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,waxapple,2020/02/18,"Thoughts on gossip, mindfulness, bullying and being supportive  

Here's my contribution to raising mental health awareness, let's start with a wee anecdotal tale.

There's things that people have control of as an individual with regards to those around them and things they don't.

Some of the major things that can influence people's mental health are finances/debt, grief/trauma/loss, illness, homelessness and social connections/loneliness/isolation. The one you are most likely to be able to make a impact on, positively or negatively is the social interaction one.

""A group of psychologists performed an experiment years ago. They started with a cage containing five monkeys. Inside the cage, they hung a banana on a string with a set of stairs placed under it. Before long, a monkey went to the stairs and started to climb towards the banana. As soon as he started up the stairs, the psychologists sprayed all of the other monkeys with ice-cold water. After a while, another monkey made an attempt to obtain the banana. As soon as his foot touched the stairs, all of the other monkeys were sprayed with ice-cold water. It wasn’t long before all of the other monkeys would physically prevent any monkey from climbing the stairs.

Now, the psychologists shut off the cold water, removed one monkey from the cage and replaced it with a new one. The new monkey saw the banana and started to climb the stairs. To his surprise and horror, all of the other monkeys attacked him. After another attempt and attack, he discovered that if he tried to climb the stairs, he would be assaulted. Next, they removed another of the original five monkeys and replaced it with a new one. The newcomer went to the stairs and was attacked. The previous newcomer took part in the punishment with enthusiasm! Likewise, they replaced a third original monkey with a new one, then a fourth, then the fifth.

Every time the newest monkey tried to climb the stairs, he was attacked. The monkeys had no idea why they were not permitted to climb the stairs or why they were beating any monkey that tried. After replacing all the original monkeys, none of the remaining monkeys had ever been sprayed with cold water. Nevertheless, no monkey ever again approached the stairs to try for the banana. Why not? Because as far as they know that’s the way it’s always been around here.""

Now, in the tale above there's a skoosh of water hitting the initial monkeys.

If we replace the water with a person, and the initial monkeys as a couple of people who benefit from causing problems for the person, and the replacement monkeys as third parties there's a new dynamic to that problem.

The problem comes in that the new people are attacking because of hear'say.

If in that case, you're one of the new people, you've no meaningful way of verifying that the target of your attacks are deserving of your wrath, other than the other new people around you.

Sure, you can perhaps find the original attacking person , and find out what the issue was, and the target person might be behaving odd, but perhaps you're the 100th person to attack them, and they're a bit worse for wear for it. The original aggressor person has an army of people fighting on their behalf, and they're all incensed because of all the other angry people around them, all shouting in chorus.

You can ask the original target person what happened, but of course the original one is going to be upset, angry and defensive. You'd think the original person will say anything to counter or stop the attack, so you devalue anything they say.

The only thing the target person can do at this point, is curl up, and take the beating.

The only thing that makes it better for the target person is if other people think for themselves, but then they're not keeping in line with their peers, and it's challenging to break out of an echo chamber, especially if the attacking monkeys think they're justified.

This can take its toll on the original person, and they can give up, and not see the point in going on.

You then can put this down to the person being unstable, and that it was always going to be an eventuality, because of their life choices, an obvious miserable demeanour, etc. Tragic as it may be, you feel sorry for the target, and wish society would do more for those that fell through the gaps, you think.

You post ""be kind"" on your facebook banner, and console the people who originally knew the target.

You like a TED talk on bullying, and post on mental health awareness day.

Then you hear about this other person who deserves your condemnation, rinse, repeat.

Maybe that target person wasn't a great person, maybe they did have a quarrel with the aggressor, maybe it was legitimate, and maybe it wasn't. The target isn't going to fight their corner, they don't know which people are acting as proxies for the original aggressor, and who isn't. At this point the target want's nothing but peace and resolution. But you don't know that, because you don't think to ask, and they can't respond to you anyway. The point is either way, it's not your quarrel, and you need to look at why you're attacking the target, and what's the benefit.

Generally, people don't gossip or talk about people for wholesome reasons. It might not always be done with intent, and sometimes it might.

If you can apply your actions to that of school children in a play ground, you should address them. But you don't stop to think and do that.

The point is, most people's lives can be made better with actual kindness, if you take everyone as you find them, then you're not just picking the deserving. The people who slip through the cracks are quite often pushed by those doing it unknowingly, or with misguided intentions.",8.715735268555541,8.405751194072657,8.150800278115767,70.49884946984183,60.95984703632887,10.704787067616897,35.8441856422736,10.061858954937977,3.6440751816443586,4583,176,749,81,55,1447,359,1046,0.11699999999999999,0.81,0.073,-0.9941,1,1,0,0,3,0,139.0,1,27,22,17,23,39,16,2,112,0,76,13,2,23,12,164,122,71,0,17,27,0,2,2,0,9,5,4,1,16,64,58,6,7,18,2,0,22,24,24,0,12,25,11,54,15,134,74,18,135,0,2,3,0,96,54,0,21,54,552,118,2,0.03464202036771513,0.0,0.03380561470737503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030708060876076068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647480818099128,0.0,0.0,0.04711552355108442,0.10897553654684328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05701486214240086,0.12335497064834965,0.06477122542961702,0.4335132917798478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558727040275473,0.0,0.05895561565512696,0.0,0.0,0.061276103722638524,0.037820114036932084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035586897501333044,0.0,0.029841033132673937,0.0,0.0,0.038853971513173664,0.0,0.03833073663511878,0.0,0.02234123727433541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03545081428874819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03863500991452963,0.0,0.06267138143138677,0.029187396257887094,0.03310193501252046,0.0,0.03388654320216777,0.0,0.0,0.017516046374165258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498653706893112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033231782551811175,0.07875143400258065,0.0,0.0,0.03819294975248117,0.0,0.0,0.03063382420414132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104685431509328,0.07808814931953334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0391066243539389,0.0,0.03615726898444591,0.0,0.030791419407514287,0.0,0.07214866671051172,0.05711504528098923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03542381289467696,0.024468683471972053,0.033848682631255296,0.0,0.03058953865592696,0.06131419580924136,0.02909057229310553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555823456188588,0.04624763519029305,0.0,0.13921026265351422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473302592153028,0.11024912753118432,0.034978565241463706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02568661915521453,0.0,0.2676598331138526,0.03684218166621752,0.0,0.0,0.03323995284327862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877946363495809,0.05269363503774155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03751393221799467,0.0,0.3602462262874235,0.4537211397011011,0.03619353810607703,0.0,0.1637395326900808,0.0,0.06635495914675335,0.0,0.0,0.0994432049545814,0.0,0.03482479865978231,0.0,0.03684605283163817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03561776655835598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826461750758793,0.0,0.035059574061327974,0.02760520511557231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062635438478244,0.0,0.0,0.03426184393783743,0.038778905617676405,0.1225990015888454,0.0,0.0,0.05792456038879973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03931135418676873,0.03264969422510046,0.0,0.07813946419167886,0.05568788751032053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507309515322675,0.13318324720894106,0.0,0.027501894620740902,0.020200040660162902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03848855927376538,0.09407863147095856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020432761156677092,0.08249166994371201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422699988884513,0.12503614064111926,0.0,0.039836613787035284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0353031783052991,0.07382609202331288,0.0,0.0,0.02230832533355642
mentalhealth,hyperactief,2020/02/18,"I need help explaining a depression to friends I have a depression, but I’m upbeat most of the time. So if I try to tell people I have a depression they don’t believe me. How can I explain to people how I feel? How did you do it? I really need help.",-0.8261904761904759,1.2699447407407405,2.4963492063492083,90.905,92.33333333333331,6.789417989417991,20.67724867724868,7.957251820313856,1.2233470899470902,192,7,44,5,7,69,34,54,0.18899999999999997,0.672,0.139,-0.5661,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,1,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,6,0,0,3,0,11,12,6,0,3,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,10,1,4,11,1,1,0,3,0,0,8,0,0,2,1,32,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757592512277693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6324309559275098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237573581683869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18909997252582905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3281132086143412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3629709649108332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3393697436290485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15679869730464058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21392990109023635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427207723475152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661750979963643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,msmvegas,2020/02/18,"Husband mental health declining, drinking, smoking pot, now not taking care of household responsibilities Hes completely going downhill mentally. Now making decisions that will destroy our lives. Is there anything i can do to tie his hands because of his mental decline?  Hes seen many doctors. They all agree but wont put themselves out to give me a hand. They say, im sorry i cant recommend anyone to you.",3.5578678678678664,6.662785297297297,4.6788288288288316,76.16241741741744,81.16216216216216,6.5321321321321335,31.195195195195193,7.793537801064563,2.83880960960961,328,17,50,6,9,107,62,74,0.11,0.8079999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.0333,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,1,1,2,0,3,2,1,0,1,0,8,5,2,1,1,6,14,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,4,11,1,6,11,1,5,0,0,1,0,11,1,0,0,2,31,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424952902910341,0.0,0.1677024932018609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422900157292482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20777833835523232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136708133437274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20858855510561156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996374344394596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19549473867222636,0.11581902796212258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166201280468292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22012907261588244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17995104103491685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603196490646938,0.2066119205785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6161196890645028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20486607670511467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620626516551148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281271553189493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322534593024706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,violina_v1,2020/02/18,"I have lost my myself in my mind I dont kowe how I can't remember ho I was a couple of years ago and if I go to sleep I watch myself die over and over again and I can see myself being killed on a daily basis

Is there anybody else like this",-1.7860714285714288,0.030291107142858213,1.4371428571428595,99.00785714285715,93.28571428571428,3.9142857142857146,11.571428571428573,5.288315135182226,-1.4731142857142858,186,2,47,1,7,66,43,56,0.19699999999999998,0.7559999999999999,0.046,-0.8481,1,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,1,0,2,0,7,2,1,1,0,7,10,5,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,2,12,1,6,7,0,8,0,1,2,1,0,4,0,1,4,35,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508250234309802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31308743177986464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2936655306502212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3316244427385369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363749396055257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16081144262604308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130508900364171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13823889187198493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088818719955501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857067231199685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32053603628755994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22548073770834626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28316215599551314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822155507336033
mentalhealth,PrimaryPhoto6,2020/02/18,"I'm not really sure what's with my self-esteem Hello guys!  


So, starting off, I'd like to outline my situation. I'm the only child, son of truly wonderful parents who have always been truly supportive and caring people. I do have some real friends - people who never let me down and offered support whenever I needed it. I also tend to excel at almost all of the school subjects (not my opinion really, just based upon my grades).  


Yet, here comes my greatest trouble - I always stress myself the hell out before any test, quiz or any kind of activity which might lead to me receiving grade at school. I study a lot, spend most of my free time devoted to subject books but not only does it not help with stress but actually only makes me more anxious.  
 I really would love to find a way to relieve myself of that stress. I have been trying physical exercises, yet they only work for the time being - during exercising I feel really proud of myself and enjoy it, but as soon as I finish, tide of negativity storms my mind again. I also used to paint and draw a lot, as well as read various books, not connected with school at all, but during the school year, I can't force myself to do these activities because my mind can't stop thinking about assignments I have to do or tests I have to take soon.   


Thank you all for reading and if any of you have any kind of advice, I would be truly glad to hear them.  
I wish you all a wonderful day and hope that you are having a great time!",7.059630911188005,6.203273532871973,7.807044982698965,73.40597693194928,64.5363321799308,10.613241061130337,30.68535178777393,9.888512548439397,2.766801891580161,1157,33,218,21,15,389,162,289,0.078,0.688,0.23399999999999999,0.9941,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,4,2,4,12,25,1,3,10,0,21,3,0,3,6,54,42,20,0,6,13,2,1,1,1,3,2,1,0,2,10,11,0,1,5,6,2,3,9,5,1,0,2,2,36,21,37,34,11,25,1,0,0,1,19,7,1,13,15,156,46,18,0.0,0.0,0.08825412535102585,0.0,0.0,0.08837464966663462,0.0,0.0,0.09056026816884513,0.0,0.0,0.1446459526078564,0.1505027814062334,0.0,0.0,0.2460028819147297,0.0,0.0,0.10216883108573946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05512996748178906,0.0,0.07695580067413142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220723737540404,0.0,0.0,0.07790404941580834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058324818879156824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07914261914836196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04572800600554432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265839685414236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987192363579592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09970785634747106,0.0,0.0895475171885114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192983293056712,0.0,0.060618467443367276,0.0,0.0,0.08982501765417747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883538439071712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247865038632397,0.0,0.044183279993044916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15377375500301646,0.08162353292682722,0.0,0.060367850556821964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594008180003794,0.1826325424424667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705839034111122,0.06975111053649392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27512770952853066,0.0,0.0,0.10042033589993478,0.0,0.0,0.12539619384613954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18092429814059185,0.10293787387624866,0.2317467624754029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36611102276888857,0.0,0.0,0.0943462191151561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165573628453438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401225209356788,0.0,0.0,0.07560994612443693,0.3107881546725353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20525520450665144,0.08523643873235233,0.0,0.06799787675635198,0.0,0.0,0.08326286077827913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794881065161395,0.0,0.0,0.15820480733298847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061401245078377464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810911440931258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178521716630262,0.0,0.0,0.08131433126869067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399886341822448,0.0,0.19615160221033587,0.06583970476301164,0.0,0.0,0.12848865957130315,0.0,0.0,0.058238897810358126
mentalhealth,thelegitKroG,2020/02/18,"I'm not able to help myself!!!!! (SUICIDAL THOUGHTS)  I always lived as an outcast from my school days. I only had one friend (haven't seen him from high school graduation). I was always loner even from my school days, I never had you know like really good friends with one whom I could share stuff with (happy or sad) . But when I came to college I thought I should change and make some friends but , I've always had distance with people I couldn't get together with people well. (Socially awkward all my life). But things changed when I got friends with this one girl. She and her boyfriend were very close to me we used to hang out all the time. she was the only person with whom I used to share my emotions, she used console me when I'm sad or when I get hung up on something. She was the only person who never looked down on me, but always stood with me and supported me always. But recently i don't know why she started to get annoyed when I talked to her or when ever I said anything. She's avoiding me and I'm not able to get myself together ever since. I've tried to talk to her, message her. But still getting the same reply. (sometimes she leaves me on seen on wont even reply). I've gotten to attached to her, the very thought that she isn't talking to me is driving me crazy. I had never imagined that a day like this would come. Me being isolated all my life and suddenly getting attached to someone and stop talking to them now all of a sudden . Is killing me. I tried self-hurt but couldn't muster up courage to commit suicide. But still I'm having these recurring suicidal thoughts over this issue. PLEASE HELP!!!!!!!",2.9698447204968943,4.908407754658388,3.516739130434786,90.33206521739136,75.49068322981367,6.090683229813665,25.475155279503106,6.868970318607317,0.9614335403726708,1275,45,258,12,28,399,153,322,0.139,0.76,0.10099999999999999,-0.9577,0,2,1,0,0,2,49.0,1,1,1,0,14,19,2,2,8,0,21,2,0,4,10,61,52,24,4,5,13,0,0,2,4,3,2,1,0,3,11,18,0,2,7,0,0,4,11,6,1,3,19,4,52,13,37,26,6,39,0,2,3,0,38,11,0,4,26,174,63,5,0.15626028650404236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250526903048103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429445077677245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936006977265808,0.0,0.0,0.1653026637466919,0.0673022002959437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06238056187912092,0.0,0.0,0.1511624365562097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788589512873912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032084455100592,0.14134637521314022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241452619465246,0.0,0.24491865087863085,0.0,0.0,0.0655318573002562,0.062487812883058325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317099031588696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473797621818567,0.0825487859882875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363993427734688,0.0,0.0,0.08154757070662584,0.0,0.0,0.0864394275645861,0.0,0.08587656690308851,0.0,0.0,0.08272854060177759,0.0,0.0,0.11037126152348783,0.0763408829739282,0.0,0.06899034790211478,0.0,0.0656096427522978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05215247731122928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18077634913952365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588290212747094,0.1782644838667652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833120765695824,0.1364404549351075,0.0,0.08576343524904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05005217040390166,0.0,0.07714409077065773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431965785544964,0.0,0.0,0.2372156284209589,0.0,0.0,0.08150677896295264,0.0,0.0,0.06463006187269478,0.0,0.0,0.07964384188448849,0.06619941683553955,0.0601484013688462,0.07727270945883895,0.0,0.055300917527420994,0.0,0.12478966665176905,0.06532029819491977,0.0,0.0,0.08944032155056338,0.2563850870469708,0.08866116067830726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511921985149941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05190619550096445,0.0,0.0,0.24810642608166106,0.04555831483622198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609047734164974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20243807487551227,0.0,0.1289311012669064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024838183656253,0.0,0.07050030191855443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05550141210291439,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,astronomydork,2020/02/18,How to find the right therapist? So I am looking to find a therapist. However I am lost in the process of doing so. How do you narrow your search where there are probably hundreds of different therapists in your area? Or how do you know that once you have picked one if they are the right fit? Obviously you can't make an impression until you meet them but it would seem ridiculous to schedule an appointment with a different therapist each week just to see if you like them.,4.73813186813187,6.4764753406593405,5.170109890109893,81.14989010989014,70.31868131868131,10.035164835164835,30.582417582417587,10.290406445055957,3.2948637362637374,380,16,73,11,7,121,62,91,0.073,0.873,0.054000000000000006,-0.1957,3,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,8,3,1,8,4,1,0,7,0,10,0,0,5,1,18,16,10,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,2,13,2,10,14,1,11,0,1,2,0,12,8,0,4,4,56,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.328566954389406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28743102430113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641559359199877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076820056453515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204291760282014,0.0,0.17164722982689254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495965189733364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16745663436122332,0.10655063539105833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16953249526470476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685660719270867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530079462714264,0.14314638730873533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7302761225199169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612932175760466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169956240751862,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThisFlatlander,2020/02/18,"I’m not crazy...but what am I thinking? I’ve been out of work for a few months with a back injury.  I got a new job where I don’t use my back and I know the work, so I’m not worried about finances or anything but I’ve got a big problem...

Every morning I set my alarm for 6:00, but around 4:30, I’ll wake up feeling like I’m in a panic.  I feel a wave of heat wash over me like embarrassment and I shake, and it’s hard to get back to sleep if I even do...

I’m only on week number three at work but it’s going well...I’ve gotten compliments from coworkers, etc.

I don’t have a thought that is focused in my head when it happens so I don’t know what’s going on in my brain that’s causing this.

I DO smoke pot daily...maybe half a gram or so in the evenings...I’ve wondered if maybe it’s throwing off my hormones...

I’m a 36 year old guy and I really don’t understand why I wake up like this every day....",-1.1675746268656724,0.7339376218905507,1.472269900497512,99.423927238806,90.6915422885572,4.345024875621891,17.827736318407958,5.7366,-0.5818144278606963,686,19,173,5,24,235,113,201,0.09300000000000001,0.789,0.11800000000000001,0.5463,1,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,0,3,11,9,0,4,11,0,10,6,5,2,0,27,31,15,0,3,9,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,10,7,0,0,8,0,1,4,6,5,0,2,5,3,19,4,22,26,2,30,0,0,0,0,1,15,0,5,13,98,29,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150473277818086,0.12445579282688465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3225034750016639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15606824315471274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361790269168176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016244365660384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559191580044096,0.09233966319793467,0.0,0.23558292123845664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141378879325663,0.09987648114529796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304216762900823,0.0,0.15890842668975794,0.0,0.22362912519730896,0.0,0.0,0.13842859914963598,0.12362880420974183,0.0,0.12523752007611344,0.0,0.14347992070540316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13873455854195668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536659761754326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20490449363540936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809051555380312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159075038644888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502421735828868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670147902734348,0.0,0.0,0.10632774814154394,0.0,0.16403065265832595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377418408915864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956244878179953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990563100650796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958118474690205,0.0,0.1109892882719124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554158752094082,0.0,0.12074634370641152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214286997631707,0.0,0.12570118437363476,0.0,0.12615196561365766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516121963369023,0.3053383851921678,0.14197842434796412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002962106626664
mentalhealth,hollowedmind,2020/02/18,Self admission to mental wards What are some things you need to know before being admitted from your own experiences,6.413499999999999,9.75774535,6.0100000000000025,69.785,70.5,10.0,25.0,10.125756701596842,3.3560000000000003,97,3,14,3,2,30,19,20,0.0,0.9309999999999999,0.069,0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3776106640539672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4340865560938721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24388120833350094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4472099564747871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32904554413412895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4629428599140138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2948172274528797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Marikuroo,2020/02/18,"I only open up when the glass is full I have trust issues, and it all started when I was younger when friends would betray me and steal something from me. That’s why it’s hard for me to trust someone, even if it means losing their friendship. I don’t tell anyone my secrets or anything about me because I’m scared they’ll use it against me, I have no problem with making friends but I keep it clear and vague. 

I’m 15 years old, and I’m a girl. I take counseling at school after my teacher told me I was pale, that’s when I broke down into tears and told her everything. I tried attempting suicide at least thrice now. So they referred me to this friendly German sister, she helps me a lot with my problems in terms of overthinking, anxiety and depression. She told me I only open up when I’m overwhelmed, which is the bad part because people who don’t talk about themselves are usually the ones who die without saying anything. 

I hate people, they irritate me so much. From 15 years of my life, growing up, I was bullied for my appearance. I was forced by my teachers and peers to fit in, and I have no satisfaction from it what so ever. It’s bland and boring. When you do something wrong, they act as if you murdered a person. A little tiny act can break everything apart, I’m so done with being pressured. I hate it when they make fun of me about my mental health, not all is fortunate enough to be blessed with happiness! 

I’m also a wrathful person, I tend to get physical and argumentative with people during fights. I want everything to be fair and just. They don’t understand at all, and stick to one thinking. It’s fucking amazing.",3.9137461300309617,5.483174467492262,4.500193188854492,85.81036408668733,72.12693498452012,7.273263157894737,28.39987616099071,7.839951260653429,1.739929882352941,1295,50,254,17,25,412,175,323,0.23800000000000002,0.597,0.165,-0.9838,0,0,2,0,1,1,36.0,0,2,7,2,19,26,5,3,8,0,22,3,0,3,5,47,47,29,3,6,7,1,1,0,3,2,2,1,0,3,16,20,0,1,5,0,0,4,7,17,0,2,8,2,48,9,38,34,10,37,1,4,0,1,30,16,1,5,16,177,64,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557779812044268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186421270742786,0.0,0.0,0.07482557616914455,0.0,0.17612421650150276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935090549599489,0.13046756283139474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216964539544452,0.0,0.1110620027294556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951086534861056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057244190889924,0.0,0.07068069787588953,0.09679886556685292,0.0,0.0,0.28852760388806004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.248032603777108,0.09893126312737628,0.055909575621036926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391671697996428,0.09586211398942387,0.2113052309338688,0.0,0.1137492043269147,0.0,0.0,0.07172817318024767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169316966538337,0.0,0.0951175608312934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558604096175539,0.0,0.10725456366253484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197195315709092,0.0,0.09097813747714772,0.0,0.0,0.14286325015736845,0.0,0.0,0.1165679032877048,0.0,0.0,0.10784335545230377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866644585167315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122915392798371,0.0,0.1450287782317428,0.16277554372505518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11588402868155336,0.0,0.22256682544992207,0.18687824481141574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047928779842232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510057603185454,0.10713810653255328,0.10830228786672252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067128097490444,0.164766786820941,0.0,0.0,0.07574394565673727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705422482881578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08046002621932702,0.0860125341694461,0.0935335767714841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685692413766747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3067648758425111,0.0,0.07265441252831584,0.0,0.0,0.1114037090853829,0.0,0.09242437695313226,0.11785906823899613,0.0,0.06311870123782698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656206942054313,0.0,0.0,0.10315615956802948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07601855683697875,0.11700128834349327,0.0,0.13782498714177546
mentalhealth,shahid6532,2020/02/18,"4 reasons to try low-carb food for better mental health  Eating and feeding need careful focus and planning. It is not right to eat without thinking. Think about everything that enters or is ingesting your body.  Interest in diets low in carbohydrates and ketones continues to increase as people discover their potential to help with intractable physical health problems - such as obesity and type 2 diabetes - but can this same strategy help in mental health problems as well? 

 Low-carb foods have tremendous potential in preventing and treating mental disorders.  

[read more](https://healthlinetip4u.blogspot.com/2020/02/4-reasons-to-try-low-carb-food-for.html)",12.986666666666672,15.071866404040403,9.200555555555551,58.48750000000001,51.62626262626264,12.660606060606062,45.792929292929294,12.161744961471696,6.5670323232323256,550,29,62,15,6,154,71,99,0.08,0.772,0.14800000000000002,0.705,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,1,2,3,8,0,0,0,0,4,13,1,1,0,18,8,10,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,3,6,8,1,3,1,0,2,2,3,1,0,0,0,2,5,15,8,2,9,0,1,0,0,4,6,0,1,1,35,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930773549649824,0.0,0.14984304691801556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753913485773794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15460663108089906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760719412004633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123906392886788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4893634027344221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4301759063073627,0.0,0.0,0.18084071935955573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4078412103665583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002634559930078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352239860431924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25816140110884084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349361077790962,0.0,0.0,0.1386992583848109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520352305553078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728764359484841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09158797473657604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129094301674084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13003840245431406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zodiax1,2020/02/18,"A quick question regarding returning to antidepressants. Hello all.

After coming off antidepressants just over a year ago, Ive never felt better in myself, I felt I was allowed to live again. 

After a recent series of events in my life, I've drifted back into my old ways, a deep depression and crippling anxiety. 

I've ordered my medication again after not taking it for over a year, it's Vensir XL 75mg. In a couple of days I'm going to start my daily doses again.

I remember my mental going on a big decline before the meds started to kick in previously. Having been through it before, will I gain the benefits of the meds quicker at all? Or will my body do what it did before where it's a struggle at the start for a few weeks?

Thanks for any help you give me, and always stay hopeful.",5.251161290322582,5.92354679354839,6.67048387096774,74.84572580645164,68.16129032258064,8.780645161290323,29.048387096774192,8.841846274778883,2.380470967741936,623,21,111,10,10,213,99,155,0.067,0.8320000000000001,0.10099999999999999,0.7314,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,2,7,6,0,1,13,0,8,4,1,1,3,16,21,3,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,4,0,0,4,2,2,0,0,5,2,14,4,25,14,3,42,0,1,0,0,5,14,0,3,21,80,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979045098807462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218312503049446,0.0,0.0,0.09956905248612853,0.0,0.11200913479781127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258616850998447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3737720190980823,0.0,0.0,0.1294945514314342,0.0,0.1626370500204263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612587827899135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620083929966759,0.0,0.09442729950189227,0.0,0.1261093449009385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811678943242825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14045719337157786,0.16642509887551415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814069362958816,0.0,0.0,0.1454258068484961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341914703529498,0.0,0.0,0.12928950589527502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3252741000408526,0.14750042232231214,0.14755459728264578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292635162512007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536407392666194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16402132603189254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445698084118931,0.0,0.16586270436107453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.310905591293146,0.15606177982318709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15306756398106985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100878836378074,0.0,0.0,0.13480174037719336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162195499520569,0.1174474419813471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885763882985345
mentalhealth,deano-13,2020/02/18,"How to talk to someone who is depressed? Heya, just a heads up this mentions depression, self-harm, and suicidal thoughts

My best friend has been a bit distant lately, and I've been worried about her - so I messaged asking if she was okay. she replied saying she's been really depressed and hasn't actually done anything to hurt herself but she doesn't want to be alive anymore 

i love her more than anything, and i want to be there for her, but i don't know what to say to be comforting or supportive

people who've got depression and had suicidal thoughts - what has helped you, what can i do for her?",6.1294505494505485,6.400717085470087,5.9559218559218525,82.13153846153847,66.17948717948718,9.42075702075702,34.663003663003664,9.23628265651192,2.9434747252747244,477,21,94,8,7,149,74,117,0.204,0.636,0.16,-0.5894,0,0,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,1,0,1,5,11,0,0,2,1,17,2,1,1,0,16,26,11,2,3,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,9,2,16,6,12,14,3,2,0,5,0,1,20,1,0,2,1,67,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.14729479306790466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14969103342515752,0.0,0.0,0.24842004482846866,0.0,0.14110768771686755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15840127829640135,0.0,0.1647864095682059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5200145192019072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15446310915951816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166151779563398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071979066699146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15490706746887747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101171300295035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158343349699358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295218460551551,0.0,0.17026588467144999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362284351480298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464217027026083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669545555859542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400656687955393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574624049134557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789021369045095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302057645103898,0.17128390743020516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12131913497540912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396575783166345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17805558942976946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153285987694073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ciaraaa1,2020/02/18,"How to know if you have anxiety ? So my mum thinks I have anxiety/depression, now I personally don’t feel like I have depression but possibility mild anxiety and I was wondering how do I find out? Is there like a test I can take? Obviously I know I can go talk to my gp about  it and see but before i do that i want to know is there any significant way that I could find out??",1.5623508137432192,3.23622993670886,4.49497287522604,82.93696202531646,78.74683544303798,9.577576853526224,23.943942133815554,9.957137785484203,2.2884271247739596,291,10,68,10,7,105,47,79,0.078,0.7909999999999999,0.131,0.594,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,0,1,0,12,0,0,2,1,20,22,8,0,3,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,8,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,14,2,6,20,0,5,0,1,1,0,4,2,0,2,3,47,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605008273626965,0.0,0.3285949398125961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18275234774507407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17147533341438506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3699599382883507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859350928725027,0.1534308042978106,0.0,0.0,0.3925894072600151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205800323120955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3540937873577878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098502797469089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18752774739785366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24211944298161134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17114285005067018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614793363209171,0.1726229481345368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376151128679909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266761454630781,0.17047339973868536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329074969260031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_purplesaturn_,2020/02/18,"Getting Help Hi all, I was wondering if anyone could give me advice about how to get an appointment with someone to talk to about stuff? I’m not quite sure what I need but I know I need to talk to someone. 
I’m a teenager living in the UK so I was thinking maybe I could make an appointment to talk to a GP or something but I’m not quite sure how to go about it. 
Before you say the obvious, no I’m not going to ask me parents to help me. 
Any suggestions would be helpful, thanks :)",1.4604901960784318,3.0903617156862744,3.2907843137254917,91.65519607843142,78.90196078431373,6.494117647058824,24.07843137254902,7.3871296695380915,0.9285607843137252,373,13,84,5,9,125,60,102,0.067,0.775,0.158,0.8955,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,2,6,3,0,0,6,0,6,0,0,3,4,23,23,7,0,6,7,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,1,10,3,15,17,1,3,0,0,0,0,13,1,0,3,0,52,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148993463972776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542321990249713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10839801388455612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449286907406883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13191598787942366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475518184408316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16198971701197362,0.1487153810744791,0.17621007088013066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117326418468349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519841621301086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13689108885495982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348127850793057,0.0,0.1557447845877543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229900117468995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17213839239380982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3297791672417413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328315924266348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627066112215557,0.11934684208215335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774680571543986,0.0,0.0,0.2922209611284545,0.0,0.0,0.3738128732374612,0.0,0.14272741543868786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933461203159137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681194409845587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012625630668696,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Colvack,2020/02/18,"I feel like being suicidal and depressed is selfish of me, I don’t have a valid reason to justify these feelings. Anyone else feel the same? I suffer from anxiety disorder, manic depression disorder and suicidal ideation on the daily. Suicidal ideation especially, nobody knows about as I’ve always kept it to myself, but I really want to tell someone as things seem to be getting worse but I just can’t bring myself to it.

I don’t know how to express these thoughts I have, I feel like my suicidal ideation isn’t justified and because of that I’m scared to speak to anyone about that part of my mental health in case I get shunned.

I see it as a selfish thing, the fact that I’m feeling the way I am and thinking these things when people have it far worse and have valid reasons for experiencing these things. But again I just don’t have a good reason, I come from a middle class family, good upbringing, no trauma in life, parents didn’t divorce, in law school and doing reasonably well etc etc. Nothing in my life has stood out as a moment that caused these feelings and because of that I’m genuinely afraid to talk about them, because In theory I have no right to feel the way I do.

Does anyone else have a similar experience like this? And what’s the best way to overcome this?",9.238904709748084,7.049105610441773,8.876736035049289,71.7386089813801,61.16867469879517,12.267396860167944,38.70062066447609,10.832165505486646,4.026105220883534,1023,40,192,20,11,330,127,249,0.198,0.687,0.115,-0.9678,1,0,0,0,1,0,22.0,0,0,1,1,9,15,0,2,12,0,20,3,0,6,1,38,43,17,4,1,5,1,7,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,21,10,0,1,16,0,0,2,8,8,1,0,4,10,22,7,32,37,5,18,0,3,1,0,7,10,0,1,6,131,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401080865750087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804400859929928,0.0,0.0,0.18658087508262924,0.18227288190930016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16266331172614246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334411050628244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09137279805834422,0.0,0.07661973607511127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321938455075249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20388132793492464,0.0,0.07783788695084255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860716691787398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19839824243010826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700697409182828,0.08385106543293254,0.0,0.31481899135688063,0.1270871301060422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294199549532417,0.0,0.0,0.14920860205992706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454621966555307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776559848293463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12565141839376687,0.13036464512637633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963738809776685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534679086604867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876482276498603,0.09632064590066723,0.0,0.06166446641325093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05698155586994345,0.3658082293803777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596002545017988,0.0,0.0,0.08905119833336209,0.09001884417143374,0.07087903159554368,0.08097376667909766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753642796812249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3891731645573413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149201612174402,0.07774336662721754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23636903295636946,0.05699347609384073,0.0,0.07061377191728192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0524630886655264,0.2118053336619197,0.0,0.0,0.07997379658247901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181288643214092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mamavucker,2020/02/18,"Is it weird that I‘ve had romantic and sexual relationships but never fell in love? So I‘ve been wondering about an issue I just can’t get out of my head the last couple of days. I‘m a 17 year old male who has suffered from anxiety and depression. Even though I love the time I spend with people I deem as attractive I‘ve never felt the urge of needing to be with a particular person. If they vanished I could go on to find a new one. Also it Never happens that I see someone in public and I go like I need to be with that person. I only make a move towards someone if I‘m bored and don’t have anything to do. Am I too emotionless? For me it just seems very weird the idea of falling in love when you see a person. It almost feels like someone needs to be mentally ill to do that, even though I know that exactly the opposite is probably true.",3.892073643410853,4.799741656976746,5.298837209302324,82.60178294573646,71.38372093023256,8.756589147286823,27.124031007751928,9.075114841892004,2.0574054263565897,663,22,136,13,12,223,107,172,0.19399999999999998,0.723,0.083,-0.9689,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,1,0,11,12,0,0,11,0,15,5,1,1,5,31,35,13,0,6,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,4,10,8,0,0,7,0,1,5,5,5,0,1,3,4,15,7,23,28,0,21,0,2,2,3,12,6,0,5,12,95,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221376904712256,0.0,0.0,0.0976020025286274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933666356363731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043537343727156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744565746908533,0.13504415176725884,0.0,0.07871107372299896,0.0,0.10512004469065596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122353704634051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06171130097061301,0.08719134876781331,0.11718553307910433,0.0,0.11154995923933098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376521318600507,0.0,0.13872575299779147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792693196627286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12525679383120686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777770473421894,0.0,0.12738674361273422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707456835091657,0.09948567559054997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192532947615984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3304601389871308,0.0,0.0814682055939492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299600694022822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971805591496965,0.0,0.27149186267448994,0.2823935800850476,0.11787503417006233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280691878202934,0.0,0.08270310460533431,0.09282325193674518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461294220953136,0.3197036729717901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158873842864804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103422724438274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19451342898420165,0.11110821254157938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31023345269522096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239823722033024,0.0,0.07116736061149756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007026512161962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235620374964904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859512069115868
mentalhealth,usuallytofu,2020/02/18,"Anybody else experience a different kind of low when seeking help? Is it normal to be start climbing out and then fall back into the pits? Anyone else go through this? How long were you in this spot?

I've struggled with anxiety and depression for many years and only started therapy 4 months ago. My counselor referred me to the school psychiatrist to help speed up my recovery process. 

I'm in my last sem of college and I don't know if I'll have access to mental health services afterwards. Which I do worry about because ""what if I'm still not better by graduation?"". (I struggle a lot with the ""what if"" scenarios. Been working on it with the ""what's the worst that can happen? What is likely"" which has been working for me).

I started takings an antidepressant in mid Jan along with a sleep aid. The first week on these meds was amazing. I was finally able to sleep. 

This is now week 4 and I feel down and have an overwhelming ""I don't care"" type of mentality. The sleep aid isn't quite working for me anymore either. 

TL;DR
Meds helped with anxiety and depression for about a week and then I started feeling down again. I'm relatively new to mental health and getting help. Wondering if anyone else has been in similar spot and what happened?",3.6111737629459135,5.989290848101268,4.394485999232838,82.74371979286538,75.11814345991561,7.515841963943231,28.91618718833909,8.438071523408619,2.3195333333333346,989,43,182,19,22,317,135,237,0.126,0.8190000000000001,0.055,-0.9476,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,0,7,8,12,0,3,13,0,19,5,3,1,0,32,36,18,0,5,6,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,14,18,0,0,5,0,0,3,4,7,0,1,6,2,15,5,34,29,3,40,0,4,0,0,5,13,0,6,25,122,29,8,0.09759877287343674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651542337931757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14932558821718062,0.0,0.0967917571178502,0.1364866625552139,0.20000295299641732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750474319269564,0.0,0.05949530606458853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631818332640452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995084535617035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16812336012601645,0.0,0.0,0.10196994481283707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445937534042725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954703276064268,0.0,0.0,0.0986977441596312,0.0,0.0,0.10691468509252076,0.0,0.08301746634778906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05099133058557325,0.0,0.05546763178857759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17261254505416573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074858632801782,0.0,0.0,0.26167360065291256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163410304387163,0.053637733142823885,0.07955602622654148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047681830521520786,0.0,0.0,0.08637184273871887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297498653184969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989498369605298,0.0,0.0,0.216820469188034,0.0,0.2950698227401739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790240936097012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426150301761356,0.0,0.0,0.09562607523438092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422826473939155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380830862131647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877516869772196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930077726199432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27632365511178264,0.0,0.07794250609020108,0.0,0.0,0.2040628567455984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338213088367393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161270259817266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23486354559553135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058417058963286,0.21315920714291012,0.09911629141015048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285040982903023
mentalhealth,spndrea,2020/02/18,"looking for advice for my friend i've been thinking about this for a while, and thought why not ask here. my friend has been showing signs of depression (don't wanna self-diagnose her, but she's just been Really down for a few years and similar to me, who has clinical depression). her parents won't let her see a psychologist/psychiatrist, because they believe she doesn't need it and that they just want to pump her full of pills. it really hurts me to see her struggling so much and her parents not doing anything. she's talked to them about this a few times already, but she always gets shut down. she's 19 years old, but obviously still dependent on her parents. 
i'm in therapy myself, and my parents have always been really supportive, so i really don't know what to do. i've thought about asking my psychologist what she/i could do to help her stand up against her parents, but i don't know if that's appropriate?
if any of you have experiences like this or any kind of advice, i'd appreciate it a lot. thanks in advance:)",5.4922617680826615,6.24378967661692,6.1733333333333364,78.34153846153846,67.65671641791045,9.96570991197857,31.38193647148871,10.035473477838034,3.001164255644852,819,32,160,19,13,268,106,201,0.053,0.8320000000000001,0.115,0.8873,5,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,3,1,9,10,0,1,5,0,18,2,0,1,1,29,34,15,0,6,11,5,0,1,2,1,2,0,0,0,11,5,0,0,5,1,0,1,7,4,0,0,6,3,27,6,25,25,5,16,0,3,3,0,30,8,0,5,7,112,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114289129921969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938181863812855,0.0,0.1800326201860796,0.0,0.0,0.14713529873209774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902478568869095,0.0,0.2022716269404885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06594690412883476,0.0,0.0,0.12188436567835904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863747350717729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863544512236244,0.10980272091756857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582301291087604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671626978858347,0.0,0.05652076797248382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251229129139519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581135127678878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265518060161055,0.1189082863585162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106236946902879,0.0,0.05285238977805108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084585550647573,0.0,0.0,0.09197269236613163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952641177854672,0.08021577811233148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351908803472716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6006180092855983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27721731437954544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17241451628301308,0.0,0.11285769520833623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639449591387119,0.0,0.0,0.11309559140219196,0.0,0.0,0.12276395136652135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695280607151272,0.0,0.09959969410559677,0.12371584726047485,0.0,0.0,0.06931882667415584,0.0,0.17176926735554654,0.06308194821842712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380870231548327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976176667420065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393316624660579
mentalhealth,dragonmermaid4,2020/02/18,"It's impossible I feel so shit.  I've been suffering with my mental health badly for the last year. I felt it was mild, but now it's like the main thing about my life. I never used to harm, but now my thighs are scarred. Now I have another thing to be self-conscious about. I can't keep getting up everyday and going to work with this feeling. I honestly feel like I'm the walking dead. Following the same old stupid mind numbing routine and fantasising about running into traffic. So much had happened in my family the last year. My sister threatened to kill herself Sunday. I went to cheer her up and we got into a fist fight. How? Why? 
I don't want to do this anymore. At work now waiting to go home in 7 1/2 hrs.",1.5936781609195378,3.846832965517244,3.15379310344828,89.66885057471266,81.41379310344827,6.073563218390802,24.149425287356323,7.3011,1.071266666666666,560,21,116,8,15,184,97,145,0.212,0.665,0.12300000000000001,-0.9441,0,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,1,0,0,2,10,12,4,0,6,0,9,5,2,2,1,22,25,8,2,1,2,1,4,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,7,8,0,2,4,0,0,6,3,8,0,0,6,4,16,4,20,18,3,25,0,1,0,0,5,7,1,0,14,74,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18150637592498312,0.0,0.0,0.17166484021584366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452803122535787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16317961819292304,0.0,0.262567799965624,0.1236599037881362,0.16619942173979652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043557920647974,0.0,0.1967490297039233,0.0,0.13844078099775045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15306832858657168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18399308281835886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17362952326279946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538557860784215,0.19150521211927707,0.0,0.0,0.2821928837134026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226290967819503,0.16913204308729887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17444017783296645,0.0,0.17477773856074394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272455659998675,0.0,0.13350239994068205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816352616158687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805770055892204,0.0,0.1776806812649438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22999474336614806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494994724912475,0.0,0.0,0.1020965772284602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16046183880931195,0.1561923262772418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520320760383933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22293645413760196
mentalhealth,sitnikova6391614,2020/02/18,"Recent diagnosis question Spoke to my doctor yesterday, and he thinks I have some sort of anxiety disorder. Put me on 2mg diazepam and 50mg sertraline for 2 weeks to see how I get on. Are there any lifestyle changes in should be making? I only drink at the weekends, albeit not heavily and I smoke somewhere between 5 and 10 cigarettes a day",4.652272727272724,6.278937257575759,6.006484848484849,75.5097272727273,70.36363636363636,9.522424242424243,34.41212121212121,9.888512548439397,3.75734303030303,273,14,48,7,5,92,56,66,0.083,0.917,0.0,-0.6106,0,0,3,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,2,0,12,9,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,6,0,9,6,1,10,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,3,5,29,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952554216084428,0.0,0.2196504867010803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037410741051588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851724176862815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32907109554558145,0.2938854704921721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2812740196526361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500114041321178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191658732130682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183721446758461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886407804583729,0.3216466599558607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835021343328398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22880212537952602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18397864882592202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23031503492609676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,not_mayank,2020/02/18,"need some advice here I have no clue what to do,I'm 15 and have an undecended testicle.i dont think my parents know. I once told my ex bestfriend (female) about this and she laughed at my face whilst I was seriously insecure about it and then she proceeded to stop talking to me later.i just want to be normal.",1.4541393442622947,4.12747398360656,2.8591598360655723,88.14480532786888,87.85245901639345,6.328688524590166,24.018442622950825,7.645422480735847,1.4854737704918035,247,10,49,5,8,80,48,61,0.141,0.7909999999999999,0.068,-0.5574,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,1,0,5,1,1,0,0,11,10,4,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,9,1,7,7,1,5,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,4,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3166434119788715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3797667988722042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17808125186033974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402679682410904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174856615003668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3450868742528311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3598027026004117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709079064040613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604471905565449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20762864909859127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096294853848967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19112433516474087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AtomicAny1392,2020/02/18,"I just... don't know what to do Hi!

I'm a girl (17 soon to be 18). I live in a small town where nothing really exciting happens. My father died 2 years ago from an accident at home, connected with his prolonged alcoholism and because of that my mom sometimes has emotional breakdowns and cries. She blames herself for what happened and has severe depression and panic attacks which were diagnosed before I was born and my father had depression too he was even suicidal. 

My problems began when I started high school at the age of 14/15. On my first day, I had a nervous breakdown in front of my new class because I was afraid that nobody would like me or want to talk to me and they probably thought that I was weird. So yeah I didn't really connect to anyone there and I guess I still don't. The first few weeks I was constantly crying, had stress dreams every night and couldn't bear to go to school without a pill to calm me down. Anyway, I continued on trying to make some friends which didn't happen. I spent the next two years completely friendless, I stayed home did my homework listened to music and slept. My parents were arguing a lot which they had been doing since I was little. I was always afraid or crying.

Then I became a 10th grader things got better I reconciled with an old friend of mine from my class who I had hurt years ago by choosing another friend over her (this so-called friend did the same to me later). This old friend is friends with almost everyone from the class and she is cheerful and lively and beautiful... just everything that I'm not. Then I started going out with her company and it was pretty cool she started changing though. She said I was her best friend but she didn't show it much. Then I got a boyfriend and we drifted apart even more. Now I don't know if we are friends or not (we never really talked in school just sometimes went home together).

I managed to find friends from my class but they seem to have other closer friends to hang out with and I just feel excluded and isolated. They all try to be liked by the popular ones from my class. 

I'm just confused and tired of everything. I don't know what I want in the future I haven't decided on a profession I just want to go to sleep and never wake up. I've been having breakdowns a lot, moments when I cry, scream and just want everything to end. My whole body shivers and my heart beats very fast and there are these thought like I'm about to die and I just feel like I can't breathe.

I don't know what to do and I have no one to share this with if someone out there knows something that I can do to fix my situation please tell me.",3.3951606603941045,5.155983106870232,3.9125581395348834,88.71616279069771,73.84732824427479,7.3171666962542155,25.926504526895084,8.057270187336151,1.4678886561334994,2084,72,426,32,43,655,254,524,0.129,0.7390000000000001,0.131,-0.0761,1,0,2,0,0,0,47.0,3,0,4,5,24,36,2,6,18,2,48,10,6,1,3,85,85,37,3,9,18,4,2,4,10,1,4,3,4,1,21,35,1,0,14,2,1,7,17,14,0,5,32,6,72,22,58,49,10,67,0,3,0,0,42,22,0,12,41,293,93,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251402393840017,0.06782372159552587,0.06355003448198332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05280713684597355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654754364124199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04437550848789135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219946859285249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773741378045876,0.0,0.05400319461633564,0.0,0.06660155870045834,0.05612875580880558,0.0,0.07049420354102309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713650314115191,0.0,0.06654080265939723,0.06858204430098556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788489214559956,0.04092903351407022,0.0,0.10932291045312628,0.06441463001050768,0.13173123675419107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138846453696815,0.05621027205036625,0.0,0.0,0.08383475461469282,0.0,0.05347116209180698,0.06064257726067801,0.17111206877155066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417861645521103,0.045338698445579376,0.0,0.0,0.058004951581110124,0.1079649018765993,0.0,0.0,0.4903213347489765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820417112513953,0.0,0.10151592601885374,0.0,0.06991275741690353,0.0,0.16836303228681407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752051524756907,0.0,0.06705320657498297,0.19097871715836687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793953083468339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439078938484212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12402123023090145,0.06360760643410239,0.11207975972455396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790965652448972,0.0,0.0,0.04236271669753136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743282765994533,0.0,0.0,0.04665334654706845,0.0,0.097894707455731,0.06129393229975665,0.06749469018353356,0.05955667030169071,0.0,0.06089542522747924,0.0,0.13318959664718513,0.0,0.08600970562342403,0.0,0.0,0.07446133675743273,0.07046926801535981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696644205179468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456570965093815,0.06842493222966482,0.060726482577999036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219700016701127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036880265532424,0.0,0.0,0.19268688624423627,0.0,0.05777524736616532,0.0,0.07169626227670957,0.0,0.052498081441423226,0.0713362015904016,0.06350983877590476,0.0,0.053772846191180265,0.048857692258641804,0.12553504907237115,0.0,0.13476044992151856,0.06764418605999285,0.050682437035546285,0.0,0.07269780425564251,0.0,0.0,0.06941932175293587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201992782449794,0.05547033838460963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042162665480525066,0.0,0.062353063503506674,0.10076666326137626,0.0,0.07294253876905152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08617578814348069,0.0,0.06199511201508135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236445129802735,0.14973085973664027,0.0,0.050906997386916085,0.0,0.0,0.0588317692229721,0.0,0.07085529607876027,0.0,0.061177036901681914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04508300887026992,0.0,0.0,0.12260621701584877
mentalhealth,GoldmundN,2020/02/18,"Depression and motor skills / physical strength? I'm an athlete and through over 15 years of training and depression I've never noticed. I'm coming out of my worst depression ever and this time it seems obvious. For me it's overall strength and a weird sense of not being able to flex certain muscles so my shoulders drop and my loses all stability...

My physical ability and mental health are closely linked. I always thought that the injuries caused the depression but now I'm not so sure. So far I've only found one study which was in 60+ year olds: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6168750/",4.108546224417783,7.318569889908261,4.135045871559633,80.35030345800989,79.45871559633028,7.390543401552577,31.320395201129145,8.384062270229773,3.0844306280875093,494,25,79,11,13,152,80,109,0.17800000000000002,0.755,0.067,-0.8871,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,4,5,11,0,0,4,0,3,2,1,1,6,24,10,11,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,10,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,7,0,1,3,0,6,4,9,6,2,14,0,5,0,0,0,5,0,1,7,46,11,0,0.1852094729636224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541091183272701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902611470309884,0.0,0.15954156139066622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6380825906938747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16753257173803332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030726274633536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19686900897492216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072020254978612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18664758701438888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428449633513794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21086221252920556,0.19434618628852512,0.0,0.1255027321389853,0.14086015004732347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860774820474972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745577364041346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14703563343423035,0.1079971331002157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385376565149525
mentalhealth,Sock989,2020/02/18,"Mental health professional doesn't care I've had two fairly recent crises, after the first one I was placed under the care of the professional in question. I had another crisis, I told the crisis team I didn't want to go back to this person as he doesn't seem to care nor want to help, they said they'd take note but ultimately it's out of their hands. Which I do understand. Unfortunately I was put under his care again.

If I'm lucky, they will contact me once a month by phone call. I've told them my antidepressants aren't working - nothing has come of it. I've said that I'm not sure about my diagnosis of BPD (known as EUPD here in the UK), after looking at all of the resources they gave me and that fell on deaf ears.

I'm not sure what to do at this point, I feel my mental health starting to slip and I've not got a support network that I can rely on to make sure it doesn't get worse. 

I don't want to end up having another crisis but I'm not getting the help to prevent one.",4.142842809364552,4.326587468599037,5.327246376811594,85.22959866220738,70.44927536231884,8.108361204013377,25.584912671869198,7.882392219407189,1.1646814567075436,774,20,172,9,13,258,116,207,0.196,0.765,0.039,-0.9795,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,6,3,4,9,0,0,9,0,17,5,2,1,4,26,46,8,0,4,7,0,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,10,4,0,1,5,1,0,4,11,0,0,4,11,7,21,9,30,33,1,25,0,0,1,0,21,12,0,4,9,104,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404932658881434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817792081807671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14442902409301145,0.0,0.11709589588573405,0.0,0.4676748191694723,0.0,0.0,0.09878227365921056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015679254423741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05798307580931841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754241266053634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982580603582292,0.0,0.06517238922418897,0.0,0.09171599450593053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24378811577452786,0.0,0.0,0.15372833850604836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09629803567404516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765463872371215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23113065783704104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153241233963713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003366081815608,0.0,0.0,0.12212502754656045,0.1554133621743173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012970079968757,0.1198108647912352,0.0,0.1084048481506007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527994945895068,0.12846213429879294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322763077862365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21816418328832532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439572346569287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116748553209445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301317192982714,0.3242392127136539,0.0,0.08622125448370106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191535653955556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202071588085094,0.11938061672134685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20291468414163144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348469408602642,0.0,0.1168635216109716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,grungeartdude,2020/02/18,"Having trouble finding friends that have the same interest as me Hello people,

I am a 17 year old dude from The Netherlands and i love grunge/punk music but i am having trouble finding the right friends who also like grunge or just alternative stuff. The friends i have now are really awful and you cant really call them friends tbh, they are just really mean to each other and i dont like that. I struggle with depression and anxiey and just need some friends who have the same interests as me and i could go to rock concerts and bands with and such.

If you guys have advice i would be very thankfull to hear it. PS sorry for my english :)",3.4309381818181777,5.538268632,3.9458181818181792,87.0129090909091,74.68,6.785454545454545,25.763636363636365,7.686295010490155,1.4126,509,18,98,7,11,160,79,125,0.107,0.638,0.255,0.9696,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,2,0,6,14,0,1,6,1,15,1,0,0,0,26,20,14,0,4,6,0,0,2,5,1,0,2,0,1,7,11,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,4,0,0,0,2,15,10,9,17,4,5,0,1,0,1,17,1,0,3,5,73,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15262110293958445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490021123723102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15948122792669345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470013818076915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452096726477625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18304637175770025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854985166602582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6033364822396409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876291164408223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464661970786686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17603061039555168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15260713223676606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409620707760623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013005784075594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11580838547954732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388873380998048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827825333065644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001662237849932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13338020025306302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17483509305408804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632773271463034,0.17879320288746414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886807732621006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094856394324562,0.0,0.0,0.1005773131925456
mentalhealth,SEND-POLITICAL-NUDES,2020/02/18,"How do I stop waking up screaming? I'm in a really terrifying financial situation and I thought I was managing it well. I recently found a job that would pull me out of it and I got to the second interview and was so visibly nervous I just lost my mind. 

I know I didnt get the job and now I'm waking up at random points at night panicking and screaming and having no control over myself in my sleep. 

I wish I was strong enough to die.",0.821318681318683,3.0457481098901127,3.6491098901098944,85.10839010989012,84.38461538461539,7.596043956043958,23.385714285714286,8.548686976883017,1.8258606593406599,342,13,72,9,10,121,61,91,0.258,0.659,0.083,-0.943,2,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,5,6,0,1,4,0,7,3,3,2,0,18,16,8,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,3,7,0,2,3,0,0,1,2,4,1,1,8,2,14,2,11,7,1,14,0,1,0,0,1,9,0,1,4,53,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24268484552749545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22456483239096628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22357495159545046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372458612985985,0.0,0.0,0.1130478846934958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730561973996827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4294409349052643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891496460117892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23620070649662525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21847876476462325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20305485644258486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20454590174475967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13861644186379513,0.0,0.21364586764478524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24321645417250745,0.21653294467281453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18090059320496613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17177891442796284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945486211346089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488225035107994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15370778533756554,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,no-name-angel,2020/02/18,"Coping with grief Hey guys,

So I consider myself overall a healthy person. I do well with my studies and work, I sleep well and exercise and I have healthy relationships.

Within the last 5 months, 5 people in my life have died, all 1 month between each other. 1 of them was a family member who died of illness, and the other 4 are friends who committed suicide. These friends did not know each other as far as I know.

I am really struggling to cope with the death's of my friends, as they came so unexpectedly and so close to each other. Before I have time to grieve for one friend, another one dies. And hearing how they did it has sent me on a downward spiral. 

I don't really feel like myself at the moment. I'm not looking forward to next month for fear of another death. I feel immense guilt for not checking up on them more often. This doesn't feel normal, almost like a curse. 

I have many responsibilities in my life and I just don't have energy for anything at the moment. But I've been pushing through. I am weighed down by grief every morning and night. When will this feeling go away?

I am seeing a psychologist at my university soon, but until then I'd appreciate hearing how you have coped with the death of a loved one or grief.  What should I do so that no one else flies under the radar? Thanks a lot.",3.22851398601399,5.101986865384621,4.3590909090909085,84.85954545454545,74.57692307692308,7.034965034965035,25.279720279720287,7.84624498591911,1.3724615384615388,1035,35,206,15,22,338,148,260,0.161,0.726,0.114,-0.8944,0,0,0,0,0,1,28.0,0,1,4,1,13,17,0,3,14,0,22,7,1,2,2,39,38,23,11,2,7,0,4,2,4,2,4,2,0,2,12,17,1,0,6,1,1,5,7,7,2,4,6,8,27,10,36,30,6,33,0,4,2,1,19,16,0,4,16,149,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206287508381944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23469724701149464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09209336063564202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514423173072812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522816630624023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799656941734974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34843838990851583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934874256306821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942899906652233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549989487447643,0.12593118374927406,0.2263426082297922,0.07994936496549568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3458491812619475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360169909785758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080965676970676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25226405279003705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300690884529833,0.09122254328016467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809234340587014,0.10934829339114917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397720049186356,0.0,0.0,0.09514287803313518,0.10100420371133394,0.0,0.0,0.11346036513932573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26797929383717817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190188030032106,0.1050210555954728,0.10964918938938087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30333563076213266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758511702265837,0.0977165203981286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14338632724640618,0.0,0.0,0.12015071913648508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917871637678287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199199476997056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699385743791092,0.0,0.12241266028279167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030327731486082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06525630544277168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012431705811236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147266742471063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TicketToAnywhere,2020/02/18,"Every day seems like a chore. Just getting up is the hardest of tasks. Being alive is not enjoyable and I really don't know how to get through it.

I feel so... Useless to everyone around me including myself. I have so many issues I don't see why anyone would want to be associated with me or even know me..",1.0788940092165902,3.4297375806451638,3.4707373271889423,85.95467741935484,84.48387096774192,6.768663594470048,21.76036866359447,7.957251820313856,1.2555917050691243,238,8,49,5,7,82,50,62,0.085,0.812,0.10400000000000001,0.05,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,1,0,13,16,5,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,8,2,8,13,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,2,35,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001132306214896,0.0,0.0,0.2547729947862856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457120609560385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890281841940331,0.0,0.2411304648868776,0.2734702646203798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470809139205928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29904870428023017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987117796402738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145690534584413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981974456658536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901554067325954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18334295879880708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22805925831828305,0.2605399193015182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16880440972190874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582452238464648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20330373349138567,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seminiga,2020/02/18,"Anxiety and work. My anxiety has crippling control over me, it always has, and dare i say it always will. I’ve always had social anxiety, and it’s gotten better at times, but it’s so embedded in to me now that no matter what i do, it never truly goes. I spent a lot of time stoned in my teenage years, trying to bury the pain away. But now, more than ever, it’s taking its toll on my life. I really started to change for the better, i figured i’d get out of my dead end job and try my hand at something new, so after applying for numerous apprenticeships for weeks I finally landed one as a heavy vehicle mechanic. Now i’m not stereotyping or whatever but i feel most people here are very judgmental of my nature, my anxiety causes me to speak very little to people i’m not close too, and my workplace perceived me as uninterested because of this. I’m really keen to work, and get stuck in, but everyday i just walk around with nothing to do because everyone has every excuse to not let me work with them. i’m afraid of being fired, and i know the general opinion of me is very negative. I just wish i could socialise like a normal person, and progress with my life. i’ve been at the point of giving up for a very long time, every day is a crippling hell for me mentally at this place. i’m close to giving up, throwing in the towel and just living on mental health benefits for the rest of my life. I can’t take another day of negative judgement and hearing people gossip about me. I feel this mentality will just follow me over to a new job if i managed to get one.

every day for me is terrifying. everything in my life is being affected. i don’t feel i can talk to my boss about it and i’m scared for the future.

please. somebody help me.",4.500185276679844,5.083767096590911,6.134377470355734,78.34085968379449,69.79545454545455,9.41719367588933,28.656620553359684,9.54385415503706,2.5201937747035577,1366,47,268,29,23,470,175,352,0.155,0.7340000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.9620000000000001,4,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,1,7,15,10,1,2,13,0,21,7,1,4,2,51,45,21,1,4,13,0,5,1,0,2,6,3,0,1,13,18,0,1,6,0,1,3,9,5,0,2,5,8,40,5,56,34,4,49,1,0,0,0,12,24,1,5,23,185,53,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22093740861095265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280842653525627,0.27083371927472183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879094538517102,0.0,0.0,0.08315624346210858,0.0,0.0,0.10790739359034056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655638735758004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092216658049117,0.09362980027031564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992693243377595,0.07066649038931827,0.0,0.0,0.17124114545208488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839187772635002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006061475463827,0.22371559401976596,0.08457325197377036,0.0795453445509212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13425701576293395,0.0,0.0,0.0969562623338842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387254375971923,0.16981000767651933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407993753784474,0.09975502528882887,0.0,0.05932509235939065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756612010871996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048641719527024174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050549620981492,0.25006346389826395,0.043240571345308884,0.08870833611301587,0.07815424565151771,0.07832685505821166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524639439727734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675859458936979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826287844728969,0.1709632873473486,0.0,0.0,0.08671911466943072,0.08492587839192893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995071506626673,0.0,0.09417882471255627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18408105059043986,0.07728183112609263,0.09247209315436453,0.0971552802702426,0.08366873266488957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134010695724654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038516818545416,0.08861201649848027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022282931668107,0.0,0.06813783491564034,0.0,0.0,0.06264646613066142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309410445197362,0.07113943249112055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15482929876934862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018233679891195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921137019001939,0.0,0.0,0.07099583348386845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177991027770364,0.0,0.0,0.19330478304964424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056996293988073266
mentalhealth,thee_candyy,2020/02/18,"A poem about bipolar disorder (Three Ayam) I feel like three in the morning on a summer night

I feel like an awful day gone...better

I feel like a bitter song gone sweet

I feel alright tomorrow 

Different than five minutes ago

That's how I feel",0.9366964285714268,3.5262852291666675,2.5717857142857166,88.83750000000002,92.54166666666666,5.242857142857143,21.44047619047619,6.868970318607317,0.9198476190476188,193,7,36,3,7,63,34,48,0.16699999999999998,0.588,0.245,0.4588,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,5,2,0,1,0,1,0,6,6,1,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,0,1,0,3,1,8,5,5,4,5,0,8,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,8,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21117428688908307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363701630874335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24889701210336815,0.2730293307436688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6022748582379902,0.5105692771933694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34915773967149355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22356035168262067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Soulsscream,2020/02/18,"Darkness First time posting on Reddit nevermind venting, but my soul just needed to scream.  I think I'm ok for now, not feeling suicidal, just very very lost.


The loneliness is slowly eating a hole deep down inside me, and everything I try to cover the hole up with just gets consumed and dragged in. It grows stronger and hungrier and darker with each passing day.

 I know that love is the only thing that will ever have a chance of stopping it, but I grow ever more fearful that it's already become too late.  The darkness has grown so strong and consumed so much already that what do I even have left to give? 

Who could love someone so broken? 
Am I even capable of true love anymore?  
But at the same time I can't fight it by myself much longer.  

I'm scared.. 
And trapped.. 
And alone..  

Maybe the darkness will love me..",3.81483446932814,5.693560259493675,3.9373417721519,88.48112463485882,72.98734177215191,6.380525803310612,27.343719571567675,7.010146845296331,1.295730671859786,643,24,124,6,13,198,104,158,0.155,0.589,0.256,0.9818,0,2,0,0,1,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,12,12,1,2,8,1,11,5,0,0,3,27,24,13,1,2,7,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,11,10,1,1,3,0,0,4,2,5,0,1,1,2,11,7,14,20,5,21,1,1,0,4,7,7,0,0,9,84,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14542691022360252,0.3099014331892569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392532955230833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550766075170902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121094254361428,0.0,0.0,0.09055563356783536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14367892502248156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185484695516392,0.2540256200855162,0.0,0.0,0.12619535545905322,0.0,0.0,0.15800517080649953,0.07099770964064947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943636647520195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07336069763153999,0.1346982303001084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716804950065803,0.0,0.15839349233638106,0.0,0.1525605920256446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327883981761936,0.0,0.5069176985220166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106507821094647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064413934024232,0.10411545445104907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067914334206658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344781242891309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057925052811535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189726152198077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11739267616954605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535904985644352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328504872183478,0.08997183984286193,0.0,0.0,0.16375346249765851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953321203010787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317130729263273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LexiAnime,2020/02/18,"Help please. Okay so, someone told me this question belonged in this sub.. So here it is..

Am I supposed to be able to hear my own breathing and my own voice when I talk? I have always been able to  do this but i just now came into 100 percent realization that I can and I have nobody to ask. Help please, idk if im crazy or something.",-0.7048571428571435,1.4758968000000008,1.1314285714285717,99.41857142857144,95.28571428571428,3.371428571428572,18.42857142857143,4.935628992294339,-0.7020285714285714,256,8,59,1,10,83,51,70,0.065,0.7759999999999999,0.159,0.6956,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,1,8,1,1,0,0,9,12,8,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,9,1,6,8,3,5,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,3,2,41,14,0,0.4466224209653791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858128162096879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20876583700376344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554085340069262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516879639784149,0.0,0.29936159437651005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412144277174184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4902573000241219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25015966291200736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18921086396971434,0.1719158798282151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794890921076747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21338343140789573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigJurn,2020/02/18,Mental Health has been a big part of my life so i made this song called My Hallucinations. maybe you can relate?  [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_MV4SclaBsc&list=RDMM\_MV4SclaBsc&start\_radio=1](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_MV4SclaBsc&list=RDMM_MV4SclaBsc&start_radio=1),35.91717391304348,47.055337130434786,14.869891304347824,-1.3055978260869665,25.52173913043477,5.778260869565218,14.445652173913045,7.1686216300943375,0.19553043478260929,266,2,19,2,4,55,22,23,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8491693479815609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000685697888915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082666488248831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839262913701406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853956804213224,0.0,0.0,0.1968401188558245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19745346238670428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21217535936753024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13868174132775146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RookieSpooky,2020/02/18,I'm dumb... I should just find something I to entertain myself in life even if it's alone..  finding a partner isn't for everyone anyway. I should find other ways to enjoy life and stop being so focused on finding a GF,2.3747727272727275,4.360682386363642,4.2545454545454575,84.1518181818182,77.4090909090909,6.218181818181819,26.90909090909091,7.1686216300943375,1.5289727272727274,171,7,32,2,4,58,35,44,0.052000000000000005,0.7509999999999999,0.19699999999999998,0.7346,0,1,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,10,5,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,5,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,1,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333158574182509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14879130934512036,0.0,0.0,0.21525889863098674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8235851810071226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182352846221652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342688091962755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18833909661566486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788119638282766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,twistyreflections,2020/02/18,"Disordered Thoughts. I’ve always strugged maintaining a healthy relationship with food. I was diagnosed with a disorder seventh grade. Even after months of steady recovery, the thoughts never really go away.

I was doing good for a good amount of time. I stopped counting, started eating well, and began accepting my true self. I was content with myself for the majority of 2019.

However, I’ve found myself slipping back into old habits. I’ve started to feel much more self conscious about what I eat and how I appear to others. I’ve been feeling very sidetracked lately. I logged into my calorie tracking app for the first time in months yesterday. Definitely not something I’m proud of.


Despite the excessive mindfulness of meal times, I don’t believe this slip up is revolving around weight. I don’t have a need to lose any more pounds or look any differently. I’m fairly certain this time is centered around a sudden desire for control. Things have been spiraling recently and keeping track of what I eat has kept my mind occupied. It’s distracted me from the trauma I’m too afraid to work through.

I need some advice on keeping myself in track and finding better/healthier methods to gain control.",5.186805555555559,7.946184069444449,5.229407407407408,76.80633333333336,71.73148148148148,8.20888888888889,33.022222222222226,8.982922981607832,3.3779822222222213,973,48,153,21,20,304,139,216,0.07,0.7979999999999999,0.132,0.9071,2,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,7,8,11,0,2,10,0,13,7,0,3,3,38,32,6,0,3,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,7,11,6,6,8,0,0,2,4,4,1,1,10,4,18,7,31,22,6,31,0,1,1,0,3,10,0,3,19,96,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089905756878215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280593954239316,0.0,0.0,0.15169506086807316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19857934678994024,0.0,0.0,0.10479067377276728,0.08576342376766401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256615946667576,0.0,0.09864352110919156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25019166208635296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320553651369974,0.0,0.11653019116044427,0.2556572281450649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34238402371147203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366772403336412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279075432605845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194084267998728,0.0948714961150566,0.13486839710996945,0.12229221860225255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338783204603997,0.18710029998537475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982746190296656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125816181757013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366119278935953,0.12477898037531747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252368299644876,0.0,0.17805212450306626,0.0,0.08199095648238469,0.16540337292529567,0.08602256100492944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703707483865303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145208821551656,0.0,0.11012721995010977,0.1197467003690627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23271037054447186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586498539320242,0.0,0.0,0.15788989790781474,0.0,0.0,0.09324813831696363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409880590468165,0.0,0.0,0.17709244274691305,0.2601474984488791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202794151688347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13581941349830431,0.10028323518198694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119870746085761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChipTheOcelot,2020/02/18,Mental Breakdown I’ve been feeling so manic these past few weeks. I just chopped all my hair off. It’s 1 am and there’s school in the morning but I haven’t slept in a few days. My heart is racing. I don’t know what to do. I have an appointment with my psychiatrist tomorrow. I don’t know what my mom will say about my hair. I wanna scream. I wanna run. I have so many assignments due this week but I haven’t gotten anything done. I can’t sit still. I’m sorry.,-1.0978787878787877,0.9787662828282856,1.167838383838383,98.44509090909092,98.2929292929293,4.2561616161616165,15.690909090909093,6.079149491110277,-0.5851163636363634,358,9,84,4,15,119,66,99,0.062,0.9229999999999999,0.015,-0.5789,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,3,0,13,4,4,0,1,11,19,5,0,2,3,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,4,5,15,0,8,14,3,12,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,7,55,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20931762026376607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16404195131901494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26029985181056914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861268117470012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30141928362699594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795805610500767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257882364823053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563362946099245,0.0,0.0,0.2979047997153955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24281657671610798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20227826033124174,0.0,0.2574271456326425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28473657342367503,0.0,0.0,0.203133207776724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40806647360832105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,haloneko,2020/02/18,"Feel like I'm not doing enough I'm going to start by saying I am not diagnosed but due to my constant physical symptoms (racing heart, always out of breath, constant sweating, headache, etc) and terrible insecure and intrusive thoughts that it's pretty clear I have some type of anxiety. I did therapy for a while (triggered by another, more serious reason) and spoke about my anxiety which helped for a little bit. However, our insurance only covered a certain amount of sessions and after that, we would have to pay for it ourselves so I stopped going. Therapy helped a little but my fears always came back, so I started thinking of other ways to help myself because I'm not exactly willing to spill all my fears and insecurities onto my parents. The only thing that helps temporarily and is quick and reliable is that breathing technique all over the internet.

To start with, I'm a very rational person but my fears are so great that it controls my decisions and most of the time prevents me from talking, even to my parents or close friends. This is just a long-winded way of saying I don't actually know how to help myself. I thought about suggesting meds but that would require me not only confronting my parents about it (who don't like taking meds if they don't have to and think that meds for MI change you and it's better without) but also getting diagnosed and I'm not sure they want to believe I may have an actual MI and not just some social anxiety. I also have too much insecurity about my own conclusions, so I can't just say it, you know?

That being said, I would appreciate any suggestions on how to deal with anxiety.",7.12129449838188,7.403188783171522,7.525711974110031,71.68267799352752,64.08090614886731,10.750161812297735,36.58414239482201,10.504223727775694,4.011286084142394,1310,60,225,30,18,430,168,309,0.129,0.7340000000000001,0.13699999999999998,0.7744,4,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,2,2,2,4,19,16,1,6,10,0,22,7,4,5,6,66,45,28,0,5,17,3,1,2,1,5,3,5,0,1,19,18,0,4,10,0,1,3,11,9,0,0,6,6,31,7,36,33,12,24,0,0,0,0,27,7,0,6,14,169,50,4,0.0,0.0,0.1639475644132147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435265228659185,0.13979269722987295,0.0,0.0,0.05712420406430721,0.0880833650077094,0.2570450361229686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459231160885882,0.0,0.05120680681423796,0.0,0.0,0.094641427818576,0.0,0.07429289519668499,0.09170836909574584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607584824521484,0.0,0.0,0.08886292097276495,0.0,0.0,0.18155252352229015,0.09421532565676974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866023181689526,0.0,0.17052041462686834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679646571040378,0.09368437508674683,0.055482493319868535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835766307091865,0.042473908048280835,0.0600110072534888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489969537056728,0.0,0.04388754991295885,0.0,0.09548048386733247,0.0,0.0,0.09261244239865188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954271087282276,0.281523669751215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233054574142316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207821576425188,0.1683840366822952,0.0,0.07433907912852597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27992167651926025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061751095951644575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916617964049004,0.0,0.0,0.2798226613691069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334725944263071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854601786780425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636799134741037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990508722656828,0.20040515797517144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562940568452057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17837102993661647,0.0,0.0,0.07022938850286688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917084030827645,0.08731018602360402,0.06315900948048014,0.06751758253520497,0.0,0.0,0.1921270929762096,0.0,0.05580716056538925,0.10765011073631617,0.0,0.13337632457947016,0.04898221043972206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931040313040293,0.049546524369860574,0.1333536700803324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097487866045577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17901771765042748,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hey-StopIt,2020/02/18,"Extreme nostalgia Hey everyone.

For the past 2 years, i’ve started getting some extreme nostalgia. It can be debilitating, and really wrecks me emotionally.

I was known as a really happy, energetic kid when I was young, and I was truly happy. But now, as a 19 year old teenager, I feel sucked. Life lost all the magic it once had. It’s dry. The best I can do is make everything feel okay on certain days. Nothing is sparked, and I feel I have completely changed as a person. 

I will get extremely vivid flashbacks to myself when I was 4 or 6, completely random memories. Sleeping at grandmas house, 8th birthday, old play dates, and they ruin me. I break down when I’m alone often. I know other people speak of nostalgia, but I have found no one can relate to what I experience. 

What can I do?",2.786535087719301,5.185634934210532,4.664631578947368,79.66808771929824,77.94736842105263,8.000701754385965,27.23859649122807,8.841846274778883,2.4948854385964907,618,26,114,15,15,210,102,152,0.07200000000000001,0.8140000000000001,0.114,0.6101,0,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,2,5,9,1,0,6,1,17,2,1,1,2,19,29,13,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,6,4,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,7,5,18,6,10,20,3,17,0,2,1,0,5,3,1,4,13,74,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662240128973401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16842919103804727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16978201612434216,0.0,0.3365510892425253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350574580015846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18053483380903404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533594773121727,0.14424220635064833,0.15699452468368275,0.0,0.0,0.24345269080206774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17597405544315176,0.0,0.0,0.16770361868396289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34169899259526043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851892310523634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820364013604776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336208914552234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17519882535878945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713139816486132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15399890646871064,0.0,0.3368241893386022,0.17092152123987325,0.10875530109383312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321026520079478,0.11126675413632724,0.14013770253153948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20563391321015215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061051688132386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359891073164155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20670653311174
mentalhealth,Grimxkarnage,2020/02/18,"I'm scared. I feel like everything I do just isn't good enough but 
I have a wife who loves me and I love her but at night I'm scared I won't wake up too see your face again and I feel like sh*t every single goddamn day and nothing helps. 
 Had to get this off my chest my apologies.",-1.119642857142857,0.8815631269841262,0.59236111111111,104.84187500000002,92.33333333333334,3.784920634920635,14.224206349206348,5.148860815047168,-1.3862365079365078,219,4,57,1,8,70,47,63,0.19699999999999998,0.5870000000000001,0.21600000000000005,0.5301,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,2,1,0,5,5,3,0,0,8,13,5,0,0,3,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,11,5,4,11,2,6,0,0,1,2,8,3,0,0,5,33,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15137983619008186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425362816918706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977680649499924,0.0,0.21095796566902955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23737058053315815,0.3353787839336054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12263544467317575,0.0,0.0,0.19687831281395984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733291329516785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293520259889868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4237015144211447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22027588291810807,0.0,0.2252273924936973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4700064055259258,0.0,0.1870474484951396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrwawaySocio,2020/02/18,"I Might Be A Sociopath... So.... I don't really know where to begin. I think most of this is gunna rely on a Q&A in the comments to figure this out. 

Hey, I'm a 22yo male living in Ontario Canada, and I think I may be a sociopath or something similar.

I don't believe I'm a full blow 'throw people under the bus for my personal gain' sociopath because I do care about people genuinely and I feel a lot of emotion. I have noticed though that I match a lot of the traits and my life has been pretty damaged because of it. 

So, luckily for me I think I have a pretty good moral compass thankfully as these behaviors I'm experiencing would be SO much worse if not. I'm going to do my best to list as much as I can off the top of my head, behaviors I think are signs of it but then also add a personal counter to it.

1. I am very easy to irritate and after that, very easy to anger. But im selective with this, for instance, Video Games, super easy to set me off. At home arguments, also easy, but with strangers or friends? I'm calm and collected, and I'm never prone to violence, even if im thinking about it, i never react that way.
2. I will purposely neglect tasks in order to shove them off onto someone else. But I feel bad doing it a lot of the time an know its wrong but 99% of the time I still follow through and even when im called out on it, I don't change (GF telling me off for neglecting chores for instance)
3. I feel a lack of empathy/sympathy most of the time. I do experience it genuinely but not often, but in cases such as a friend has a breakup, I don't feel that bad for them but I will comfort them and offer advice to the point where it looks like im being sympathetic but I often feel as if I'm doing it to make my friends like me more rather than actually caring about how they feel, even though I actually do care. (IK its confusing and hard to explain, Its like I care but I don't at the same time...)
4. I'm extremely impulsive, especially with money. I spent my $9k school grant in 2 months. 'Nuff said there, cant even back this one up, I'm just really bad with my money and I don't realize how far I've gone till I'm broke again. 
5. I ignore my GF unintentionally, I know I have to give her love and affection and attention but instead I sit on my ass playing games and I often totally forget to spend time with her or acknowledge her, even when she directly asks for attention, I'll promise her attention but then it slips my mind and I keep playing games. I know she needs it and I truly want to make her happy but my mind just throws the idea out the window and totally forgets, same with doing things that would make her life better. I want to do it, I just genuinely forget and I feel bad.
6. Continuation of the last one. When my GF does get mad or frustrated with me, or anyone in general (usually due to me forgetting to do something for them) I tune them out and don't respond, I'm listening to them but I'm not there, y'know? I hear the words but they don't mean anything to me. Its almost like, ""Welp they are mad now so there's nothing I can do now, so just shut down and wait for them to finish"" and I think that's partially why I don't learn from my mistakes. 
7. The only time I start to listen is when there is a life changing risk on the line, say for instance my GF has had it and threatens to leave me, then ill start actually actively caring and will do well just to bring it back from the brink of break-up but once the dust settles I'm back to my shitty antics. Same goes with the workplace, but they are typically less forgiving, thus I've been fired from quite a few places, usually due to arriving late numerous times.
8. Small point, but I think it counts. I drive pretty recklessly, I'm almost always speeding not by much but I'm often 10-20km above the limit. I don't swerve around or bob through traffic, but I just little care, I text and drive a lot also. But then I also criticize other drivers for being bad drivers and driving recklessly.
9. When called out on mistakes by someone who doesn't know me well such as supervisors or acquaintances, or if there is room to lie to soften the blow or get out of trouble, I will often lie. But will not usually lie if it means it will harm someone else, like I will own up to a mistake rather than show the punishment onto someone else (but maybe cause that would increase the chances of getting caught in the lie, but also cause I don't like throwing people under the bus). Even on small things, I don't wanna take the heat so i'll lie, knowing that if I get away with it i'll be off the hook but if I get caught lying the consequences will be 10x worse.
10. As mentioned earlier, I'm irresponsible, I've been fired from a few jobs for being late constantly, and I constantly neglect household chores and responsibilities, even if I'm aware of the consequences of neglecting them, and in the case of the chores, sometimes I just straight up forget about them, but constantly. 
11. I'm very selfish and I often don't realize till I'm called out on it, just in general. Trivial stuff like getting someone a drink when i go to the store to get one or lending money to a friend is not an issue, I don't mind doing that stuff. It's more-so the total absence of mind in some situations causing me to totally forget to do things for people like mentioned earlier. For instance, a while back my GF had a really hard day at work and when she came home and complained about it, I still expected her to make dinner. Like WHAT? what was I thinking? After I realized that was a really stupid thing to do, but her being the best, actually did make food, although being very pissed off at me for good reason. 

So that's about all I can think of right now but I assure you there is more. The one thing turning me away from believing I'm a sociopath is that all the sources I've seen talk about how they don't show remorse and don't really actually care about anyone other than themselves but that's not true for me. I love, and care for many people around me, I'm just unfortunately pron to neglecting them sometimes, but I also have the opposite for some people sometimes where I cling to them and wanna be around them all the time. I genuinely love my GF and my friends and care about their well-being also. 

I don't really know what I'm looking for posting this here, Confirmation? Knowledge? I know I wanna bring this up to my counselor and doctor but I also don't wanna walk in and open up the sociopath can just to find out im just an idiot and have something else or embarrass myself someway. I think its good that I'm self-aware that I have an issue though, no matter what it is, at least im not blissfully ignorant, thinking everything is fine while everyone around me suffers. 

Most importantly I need to know how to be normal, I want to be a good BF for my GF and lately I've not been, she is pissed at me and I need to take the initiative and stop acting so selfish but I don't know how, whatever is making me act the way I do is hardwired into me and idk how to stop it. 

​

Anyway, Thanks for reading. If you have any questions feel free to ask away, and of course any help is much appreciated. Just plz don't lecture me, I want to learn, not be told off.",3.403457495851004,4.607655659905344,4.796661687872644,84.62072367693163,72.8607167004733,8.028621304321103,26.42719896736124,8.52124585384065,1.7145607302231238,5687,192,1187,98,110,1898,482,1479,0.141,0.698,0.161,0.9774,1,0,4,1,0,0,172.0,0,2,18,9,98,85,9,3,69,0,104,15,4,19,11,291,222,143,0,31,76,0,12,9,13,13,5,5,7,3,64,68,3,12,48,10,7,19,35,36,2,4,17,21,157,50,191,178,35,159,1,8,3,4,80,75,3,41,68,823,221,8,0.0,0.0,0.1678474883383268,0.0,0.0,0.033615341878523865,0.0,0.0,0.06889338484712224,0.0,0.0,0.22007773344955486,0.0286236068246014,0.07454490433112901,0.041799839887530235,0.04678644277436875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048106645558308216,0.0,0.028308319465257917,0.12249339156584865,0.0643188275028468,0.0,0.09695997022647286,0.10580609534095284,0.14361307192921485,0.041939916291445584,0.0,0.0,0.07751417843360471,0.07220148426937059,0.030424058825825426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053789265712114,0.039344505972139315,0.31565839726284944,0.10601501700335812,0.07278140737287385,0.0,0.0,0.11152273661558036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0221851937633882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0352099205085681,0.03010372555783289,0.0,0.0,0.033698963941664266,0.0,0.0,0.11494734875441825,0.03869543896459104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15904641288629262,0.0,0.0,0.03287073285952091,0.030916557066562943,0.033649860913259576,0.0,0.0,0.13914963724081725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03144103291910122,0.0,0.04159669080421903,0.0,0.13288701056170396,0.0,0.12580828593592788,0.032999673472052383,0.03910069529808307,0.11541255764346828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036619505037510665,0.0616313963254321,0.0,0.035304387424639185,0.0,0.0387713693294046,0.0,0.02305763604096397,0.0,0.06901213280763407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0388334821420484,0.22294781641799266,0.07180945339104912,0.03413675293289368,0.030576355168573675,0.0,0.0,0.20795911522783567,0.028040641364202677,0.11641430289513754,0.03642469805645709,0.0,0.0,0.07289334211372978,0.1512551915164584,0.034477898753235585,0.030375884463389933,0.0,0.0577747754151272,0.0,0.0,0.11698280821185207,0.09314219547183636,0.0,0.13777384867226378,0.034876262966624584,0.03455948536888103,0.07494350319816423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03649302895940559,0.13893702267575453,0.0,0.027457800821749662,0.0,0.10115201303264623,0.07652162896180671,0.05306289611185147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03370475635721188,0.03300778669770245,0.0391646979173814,0.0,0.03663494270512134,0.09324148756806963,0.0261627968284566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309202726022474,0.060073613502014886,0.03594074249362625,0.0,0.06503835422989819,0.0,0.032945749775539726,0.10499168849791976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03853594160312171,0.03658869969681424,0.03440937055518613,0.0,0.1322253612190482,0.035368992451639485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029377464485416175,0.03272233593572889,0.02735630955061372,0.0,0.03481469867856983,0.0,0.0,0.035886766425275815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03866711033093724,0.0,0.0,0.14573530200146306,0.07944854372512905,0.10206762102541186,0.0,0.04869708104431529,0.0,0.05494386695682811,0.05751998334312618,0.0,0.0,0.07875968034377974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051729130079742405,0.02764946631020859,0.030067169916441414,0.06334190950467783,0.0,0.0,0.11426936125242353,0.2424638737173544,0.1013936570300836,0.0,0.1604716195691951,0.0,0.0,0.03287073285952091,0.0,0.0,0.03741738858780079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11366042291720856,0.11353461331657168,0.08116018997795595,0.054610335112431914,0.0,0.0,0.09278935946670797,0.0,0.031040704835269755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02504365440924971,0.0,0.07011320291255457,0.07331044991910124,0.03761106693974823,0.041799839887530235,0.0
mentalhealth,Chukuta219,2020/02/18,"Reoccurring sadness and jealousy of other Ever since I turned 18 I have had reoccurring feelings of sadness.  It’s mostly due to my lack of friends who I hang out with outside of obligations like school and work.  Right now I am at a time where I am not in college, because my mom stopped me from going due to my first semester grade.  I’ll be going soon, but now I’m going crazy because I spend everyday at home.  I am not allowed to see some friend from college and it’s a little vexing.  I am also losing interest in things that were fun like videogames.  I seem to get jealous when my one friend brings up thing I can’t do and probably can’t do in the future in college.  Right now when I return she will keeping a close eye on me while I commute to college.  I am also jealous when watching streamers on YouTube having better lives than me.  Which sort of made me want to switch my major to enjoy life,and not struggle with computer science.  Right now I just want really close friends to lean on and tell them things I can’t tell other people and especially my family.  With my mom being a hardcore Christian it’s just hard to get through to her and to stop treating me like a child.",5.136963276836156,5.663650182203393,5.746000000000002,81.889395480226,68.36440677966101,8.15774011299435,31.83502824858757,8.021203637495839,2.224130282485876,937,38,182,11,15,304,131,236,0.121,0.7040000000000001,0.175,0.9508,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,4,14,18,2,1,6,0,17,1,1,2,1,33,32,14,0,3,6,2,2,3,4,1,0,0,1,1,11,13,0,3,2,0,1,5,6,6,0,2,3,5,30,12,34,26,4,42,1,3,3,0,13,18,0,4,22,129,41,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20257571466197685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441832088025362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201815582078957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456884730240367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940130129011226,0.0,0.06404177462022655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077346987949074,0.0,0.0,0.39142069612419,0.0,0.13234650209087204,0.0,0.2159469157457027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346013029620458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270476745168606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257889479222584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946184993417923,0.18563518769792026,0.12694396421673262,0.11184078293084217,0.0,0.0,0.1416972053478243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984627103136232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29667917451689146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582631547583185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878082764373657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655807277536494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113995791560136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3244941195900195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281840257986704,0.10092952979184246,0.11530411762721543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047722897551787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21178247431832325,0.0,0.13240978901123066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22140825746307785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524365967262185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385493413545582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13776685383205398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941160315661628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220807775838327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shuber80791,2020/02/18,"Am I crazy? or do I just think I'm crazy? Weird question.... Sometimes I feel crazy. I feel like my whole life there's been something off about me and nobody will tell me. 

My life is 100% normal - great job, I perform extremely well, make great money, have normal & good friends, get along with literally everyone. Great family life etc... I see a therapist weekly due to job stress, life stress, past trauma, and just wanting to generally be the best person I can be and maintain a quality life. I am very sensitive, especially at work and thrive on acceptance from others (which i naturally do not constantly get, but it does affect my mood when I'm not), and I get very irritated with people that I don't mesh super well with - yet I hide my emotions insanely well and nobody would ever know. I've been told many times by bosses when I lose it and quit a job that they had no idea how irritated I was. However I always way over think it and try to make a rational decision, and only ever leave when I have something better lined up. (Currently going through exactly this).

I recently quit drinking (also part of therapy), so I've just been thinking a lot. I assume my therapist would tell me if something were standing out as off about me, right? 

I had a crazy nightmare last night that I was screaming at my family because they were having an intervention with me tell me there's something wrong with me they've always known about and I couldn't get it across to them that I'm fine. Anyways, sometimes I just feel like I'm in a cloud of messy-brain-ness that I can't get out of. Maybe that's part of removing alcohol from my life too, I've heard that happens..

Would love opinons, and I'll likely share all of this with my therapist next week anyways. Thank you!",5.438894778690699,6.112294772594758,5.971504108136762,80.01897362841244,67.74635568513119,9.501669758812618,29.876623376623375,9.573946990214177,2.580662973760933,1389,49,271,28,22,450,183,343,0.128,0.737,0.135,0.5039,5,0,6,0,0,0,54.0,0,1,3,8,24,27,0,2,9,0,27,9,0,5,4,60,53,21,0,8,9,0,3,3,1,4,7,2,0,1,15,20,2,0,13,1,1,2,6,7,3,0,11,6,42,19,35,35,7,33,0,1,1,1,14,12,0,5,20,173,57,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811346543932038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060712645181966125,0.12634189621866213,0.08225854121342682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04627970702629109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967263252576849,0.06714446062435453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475105854704684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204180382674431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643750023414062,0.0,0.0,0.07437202151153906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853990058583055,0.0,0.0,0.08467009957649374,0.0,0.1373467256286724,0.0,0.0725441546381147,0.0,0.0,0.14313993859703805,0.0,0.11516125353414013,0.10847354118835116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058655070970179385,0.0,0.1983235314244119,0.0,0.04314669372119506,0.06367751568431351,0.0,0.25110392355145633,0.0,0.0,0.0671351955522082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570366062992257,0.0,0.0,0.2260146034033129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04172326759205891,0.06188437087697723,0.0,0.08038758794174243,0.0,0.0,0.32174432526263325,0.11127102084075184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493428904756453,0.0,0.06454388289112517,0.06852014181855275,0.0,0.10135345857040508,0.07697026484511554,0.07627115165117461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074104800787878,0.07124512999381649,0.14876961019804869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057740056694214975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442642998825366,0.0724735723260764,0.05263289077150583,0.06628981358865907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504700271604969,0.16149906362945135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496116014983538,0.0,0.0,0.06483467635521452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060497861166227636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23378557723473006,0.15017227868239838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17393062735783074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19907047098133246,0.06989630103196592,0.08682034799599803,0.2644445129299922,0.0,0.14593808605263187,0.0,0.0,0.04426916048239452,0.0,0.0,0.0725441546381147,0.0,0.05154422835847808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252827641600683,0.04477917633736488,0.060261214925849176,0.12179578300980845,0.0,0.20478173305998454,0.0,0.0,0.08476119894396321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527016224227235,0.0,0.0,0.16179269985398667,0.08300584802420331,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CRSTZ,2020/02/18,"Emotionless on anti-depressants? So I have BPD, depression and General Anxiety Disorder. Currently on anti depressants, and anxiety medication. 

Anyone else who are on these, do you ever feel totally emotionless after it sets in? Like you’re able to go about your day- better than before- but you feel nothing? 

Any help appreciated!",5.5347532467532465,9.191358890909092,7.212467532467536,57.34727272727275,78.27272727272728,12.5974025974026,35.12987012987013,10.914260884657429,6.5281688311688315,269,15,34,13,7,92,45,55,0.28,0.662,0.057999999999999996,-0.9012,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,3,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,8,6,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,2,8,6,1,10,0,2,0,0,5,4,0,0,5,24,7,0,0.21163958379781192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392217441307967,0.0,0.32380740464462265,0.0,0.0,0.14798331785685656,0.2168497640097665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18008969782003795,0.0,0.0,0.18717801316081445,0.0,0.0,0.266552646998488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364900230436638,0.0,0.5468545902196061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425572986259477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17679771526483282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19144012013995948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140226652523047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027965270841907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141857551848713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339641031530852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21320461506281968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20307388860514025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leileicos,2020/02/18,"Feeling Alone im currently in high school (senior), and just halfway through this year my friends just started leaving me and not giving a shit that they left me. i started off the year well, but people just started ditching me for better options and now im all on my own. i dont have any close friends, ive deleted my social media, and i feel like i just dont deserve happiness anymore. maybe its me? i dont know
everything just keeps going wrong and getting worse and i know everyone keeps telling me college will be better but i cant manage a day without feeling utterly depressed. i have diagnosed depression and anxiety, and this experience has done nothing but make those feelings worse by tenfold. i have a therapist, but she doesnt help other than just saying to ignore my issues, and i dont know how much longer i can put up with it. every time i do anything im bombarded with the reminder that i have no friends and that im useless at everything. 
honestly the only reason i still want to live is for my family, but i just feel like giving up on trying in life (like school, etc) ive lost motivation for so much that i just feel like a failure and i dont know how to stop it. everyone says i have to be more confident in myself and stuff like that, but i just cant have a single good thought about myself and i just thrive off validation from other people. i just dont know how to combat these emotions without working to reframe my whole way of thinking.

does anyone have tips on getting through school with no friends and with no motivation to do anything anymore?",5.795797962648558,6.189694983870968,6.303480475382006,78.9299575551783,66.90322580645162,8.977928692699493,34.70288624787776,8.841846274778883,2.9449032258064505,1255,57,235,19,19,408,151,310,0.185,0.645,0.17,-0.653,1,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,6,19,22,1,0,8,0,27,3,1,7,1,66,53,24,0,1,20,0,6,5,4,1,2,2,0,0,15,19,0,4,16,0,0,2,15,7,1,0,3,8,38,15,34,47,8,29,0,4,0,0,13,14,1,1,17,170,53,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297970011057814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04791809845377951,0.0,0.05390494952949284,0.0,0.13976318043281855,0.049270233885080617,0.0,0.11597212857057808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463978535065295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04544360442604965,0.0,0.1213814906141982,0.07151971874541233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06166372989980996,0.07210938057445362,0.4955013758949113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926278400602371,0.0,0.0,0.07858625222915808,0.0,0.0,0.05936915997456721,0.1346631989960395,0.12665742788028786,0.06892754621135287,0.06642741283474261,0.0,0.21377301698065931,0.15101899804044264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177619832662333,0.0,0.07362931255048652,0.13519143654517488,0.040046450548516986,0.05910206004154622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501049208543023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04723069369691929,0.07444933665595106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3044538769116876,0.07354635773655073,0.0,0.12526370550471594,0.0,0.0,0.1936265132091852,0.0,0.0,0.07461145426404141,0.07655960122926962,0.0,0.049770975477883166,0.1721263380525352,0.0,0.062221213497973125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692004008053041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04703542631549373,0.0,0.0707907985398378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359864592979258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06761233720415924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05359122856585365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770206130400223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07083602197493101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244897290790075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207198125321152,0.0,0.21394071359051528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07233052814960331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182941730812274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496248519136106,0.0,0.056272831832194684,0.058911258506826415,0.0,0.0,0.08066469458047744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061588850224443936,0.0,0.0,0.08181441184739345,0.0,0.04515063876440222,0.0,0.05594073438123984,0.04108826408665715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04784059249956562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04156163349120545,0.05593123262504137,0.0,0.0,0.06335581276298957,0.0,0.0,0.07867080578354954,0.0,0.13585002264772042,0.0,0.05129880480173129,0.0,0.1436181577760029,0.0,0.07704158306123172,0.0,0.09075331857563083
mentalhealth,Bjoerneboe,2020/02/18,"What would this be classified as in the world of psychiatry? To keep things short, I basically indulge in a lot of self-harm-like behaviours for emotional gratification. It can't be called self harm, however, because it's not the direct injury one's body. It's more than that. And it's not with the intent to cause suffering, because like I stated, I do it for the emotional pleasure it gives me. Behaviours such as starvation, sleep deprivation and other forms of dysfunctional living gives me a great deal of pleasure.

I'm wondering if this kind of thing has a clinical term that I could use to familiarise myself with it. My therapist brought up non-sexual masochism, but from my understanding, masochism is also about the enjoyment of one's own helplessness, whilst I feel very powerful when I engage in such behaviours.

Clearly this kind of reaction to dysfunction isn't mentally sound, but from what I can tell there really isn't much information about it, or really a way to understand it. 

Any thoughts?",8.721967213114759,8.800756743169401,8.698912568306014,65.29000819672133,60.80327868852458,13.877377049180328,38.518579234972684,13.023866798666859,5.513339234972677,816,37,138,30,10,266,112,183,0.1,0.735,0.16399999999999998,0.8823,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,7,12,0,0,9,0,11,3,2,3,1,24,22,10,0,3,6,0,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,19,4,0,1,6,0,0,1,5,4,0,2,2,2,12,8,27,16,6,12,0,3,0,0,7,6,0,4,4,98,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582314117529052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984916135150486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17657807609573206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16087715082024162,0.0,0.0,0.14789099709269318,0.0,0.0,0.14878369975452693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156376083436451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14931677719310724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3258359467656343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323207044172796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778746058046331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15967922937086695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873449560956274,0.0,0.30164319789731897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075823670082944,0.0,0.12789046122501824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313209608466805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459579056449858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646914344317736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962855907086308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855678468921585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30218544684909754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14493790124708136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265906918028734,0.0,0.0,0.16816262939580226,0.19244162364488746,0.0,0.0,0.1149814656301432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30155315533328786,0.0,0.1250894729122943,0.0,0.11950264427329227,0.0,0.11496193557095025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570655404106564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288542395165903,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bubba967,2020/02/18,"Feeling unheard at times No matter what I say or when I express myself, some just don’t wanna hear it or take offense to it. It really irks me that I can’t express my feelings without feeling like shit! Reaching my breaking point! 😡",2.112391304347824,4.630414152173916,3.6458260869565247,85.31004347826091,81.3913043478261,4.5495652173913035,30.93913043478261,5.6839178017228535,1.6286747826086962,185,10,32,1,5,61,37,46,0.174,0.672,0.154,-0.2359,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,10,7,3,0,1,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,5,7,1,4,7,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,3,3,24,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5016062327714892,0.2362383296511329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3727011370750923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155386720129492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31260010923307696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21184249842460093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629705334642229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394389455875729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486307026819863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928225521698356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31876435597299746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,4771,2020/02/18,"Need help. Now! I just realized that I have been repressing memories. The most recent was my cousin’s death in November. I just realized it today.i. Understand it’s from years os severe physical and emotional abuse. I’m worried about what else ,Ishtar be down there. Any advice?",2.3543777777777777,5.097621060000002,3.332666666666668,81.06411111111113,98.4,8.622222222222224,25.555555555555557,8.515128840125781,3.3240888888888893,223,10,37,8,9,71,43,50,0.27899999999999997,0.6459999999999999,0.075,-0.9134,0,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,9,7,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,4,0,4,4,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,3,23,8,0,0.0,0.3499546091675105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886234514026051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20085567835643506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467363015893861,0.3322414862790485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19797432134937895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190065153159172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29163345651477424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336739751158419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27996778991070315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30748132461926125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999535371949018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19020286649300708
mentalhealth,SmoothInspection3,2020/02/18,"My boyfriend is suicidal. Where can I get him the help he needs? My boyfriend and I live on almost opposites of the U.S. lately he’s been having major breakdowns and suicidal thoughts. 

He’s always struggled w depression due to childhood trauma (dad was physically abusive and mother died of alcoholism) but in recent years it has gotten much worse- esp over the last few months. He keeps telling me he wants to end his life and I’m afraid if I don’t take action I’m gonna lose him... 

He has two best friends that have spoke of getting him professional help including being admitted but I feel they don’t understand the full situation. I’m gonna speak w them tomo and explain the situation.

 I’m very new to all of this and I NEED to get my boyfriend help. How can I do this? Should he be admitted to a hospital? Seek a psychiatrist? I don’t know the proper care to give him but it needs to happen fast. He doesn’t have insurance at the moment but I’m willing to cover whatever he needs. 

TLDR; my boyfriend is in an EXTREMELY unhealthy state of mind and is on the verge of suicide. We live thousands of miles away but thankfully he has two close friends near by. I’m calling them tomo to explain the situation. My question is where do they bring him and what help can they get for him?",2.8129265091863545,5.0618456141732295,3.9146653543307077,85.84645997375328,77.11023622047244,7.382939632545932,26.7250656167979,8.344100000000001,1.8983128608923887,1022,41,203,20,24,331,139,254,0.129,0.7340000000000001,0.13699999999999998,0.514,0,0,1,0,0,1,25.0,1,0,5,2,3,10,0,2,12,0,25,2,0,1,1,36,59,15,4,7,6,2,1,0,2,4,2,2,0,0,6,10,1,1,9,0,0,2,4,5,0,3,5,3,26,5,26,48,6,28,0,2,0,0,41,14,0,3,11,120,32,1,0.0,0.13061325032115362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11781021690856902,0.11038679640020492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172631786921916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357163237186744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568731252676333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125646740307642,0.0,0.11239433964359356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494728017408356,0.0,0.11440897970916615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763758441677968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05573932355533728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17033822810892926,0.0,0.2303778914686841,0.10574972459013532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748253701648056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955591258315404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798403432037736,0.0,0.0,0.06058357235778732,0.0898581649332534,0.12435254831576305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786391037585842,0.0,0.0,0.19468322429952054,0.0,0.0,0.12332741281149565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130831260934776,0.0,0.08799041230544119,0.0,0.0810371466932794,0.3269584346949317,0.0,0.1064679331882877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12349107680725813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884609792224399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37173424806666816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524402806383098,0.0,0.3617453522588157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288477860020205,0.0,0.09635231513915736,0.10149175401395806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751615346892573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21537177323662424,0.11476098376618835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095737038006706,0.0650208535026916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234129186784626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098924821178924
mentalhealth,anon101991,2020/02/18,"The night I was born Silence greeted me. Not of the sort that draws one in and embraces in its bosom or lulls one into intoxicating lethargy; neither that, that follows the rush of air and curt whine of hinges fastened to a door swiftly shut on the trials of an arduous day. I was greeted with the song of malice. A numbing silence bred of disgust, malcontent, and icy disdain. The sort of vacuous void that trots on the heels of an eruption of venom.

I stood stunned, paralyzed by the absence of cohesion in my mind. My thoughts had been dashed; cast into the abyss as if they were struck by a thunderous gale. I blinked. I shuffled my vision and focused on the front door, the hammerblow of its closure still reverberating in my skull. 

""Wothless"", ""fucking piece of shit"", ""deadbeat"", ""you're the fucking reason why"". 

I didn't feel anything for what seemed like hours. I stood peering into the door. Perhaps through it. Maybe in an attempt to reconstruct the events that just collided and left me reeling in the dusty aftermath of discord that followed.

A blur of motion swam before my eyes as I staggered to a nearby chair. The peeling tick of my bare feet on the linoleum floor echoed and coalesced as I slumped. 

And then I made my descent. The world around me made its evacuation, fleeing from the darkness enveloping me. The light emitting from the dank apartment rose, it wavered, and then it was gone. A candle caught in a gust.

My throat closed and I could feel the wounds in my chest for the first time. Thin lacerations, each no more wide than the breadth of a hair descended in a wave through my torso. Each one intersecting in a lattice through my heart. The last of the light poured forth.

I jerked as if strung on a marionette. Through the void I could hear the distant pattering of my own feet on the linoleum floor. I felt the bite of cold steel saturate my hands. 

I felt a wall thud against me from behind and the strings gave slack. I crashed to the floor and the lines went taught at my arms. The kiss of cool metal met my lips and the taste of iron flooded my senses.

My thoughts came racing back to the fore as if beckoned forth by the icy touch. The strings tightened and the darkness smothered me as if sensing the challenge to their rule. 

I heard laughter then. Not of malice, or of madness. But the sweet song of innocent joy. The giggle of a child's glee. 

The strings gave free, receding back to the void. The silence replaced by the calming melody of my steady heart. The light returned, blurred through tears. 

I peeled my eyes open and blinked to clear my vision. 

I was alone. Sitting against the wall. My sons clumsily discarded shirt dangling from the corner of a chair before my eyes. The pistol from the drawer came to rest on the floor beside me.",4.193322670078906,6.404504049904034,3.80556365962892,88.3998703348262,72.8003838771593,6.473721475794412,30.771635743228835,7.3011,1.8306316997227552,2194,100,416,24,45,657,266,521,0.073,0.8340000000000001,0.09300000000000001,0.9136,1,1,0,1,0,0,69.0,0,0,2,3,5,18,7,0,69,1,10,24,17,3,1,54,36,30,0,6,10,1,8,1,0,0,3,5,3,1,13,25,1,0,9,2,1,12,5,9,0,4,26,23,50,10,85,8,7,69,0,1,3,3,9,40,3,11,17,269,63,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415574054928337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247452103158767,0.12167258429816175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21019421358271276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326061796438661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126469213315057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21825285803888325,0.0,0.0,0.08814613829663873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13821721931946468,0.0,0.26246503107066244,0.0,0.0,0.11625841554169837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25271360534811355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15404627605730747,0.3239286736865243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460050504917484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141098328807088,0.0,0.0,0.14850127500058746,0.0,0.0,0.06677406948721502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25865645394732834,0.0,0.0,0.1373116326715738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800602944824045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826324118050464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778500769189643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14052796352853889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442670904285605,0.0,0.0,0.14029821837127726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091513950020384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170144631554677,0.07969816334540547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670206992259678,0.123330825523381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,averystrings,2020/02/18,Could use an honest chat I'm having a bit of a hard time so if anyone is up for a chat I would appreciate it.  I'm a fucking piece of human garbage I'll say that up front but I'm trying to be better.,-2.080567375886524,-0.3120088085106367,1.7756382978723408,96.28416666666668,94.53191489361704,3.984397163120569,14.21631205673759,5.46131890053228,-1.0390964539007093,154,3,39,1,6,57,35,47,0.027999999999999997,0.79,0.182,0.7684,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,5,0,5,1,0,1,0,5,10,3,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,2,6,7,2,4,0,0,0,1,4,2,1,1,1,23,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25632085690124884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3242097110760936,0.4002097881510239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926838415037449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388967708288603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283831606801143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915186716633633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137554102917678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488833662278454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31660692388974804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604075053803017,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shadowed_out,2020/02/18,"When is it considered that you've gone INSANE or at the point of no return I have been actually weird for the longest time very strange mood swings, weird way of speaking and I've been diagnosed with alot of things or have been suspected of having recently, weird way of speaking or like a bit less of control of my body like I'll start swinging my arms around randomly and hit myself randomly (I knwonits cause of my ADHD and other things but still) I just feel like I've been going insane and I feel like me questioning myself if I'm going Insane has been making everything worse na stuff. Am I really going insane/losing it?",6.7805971896955475,6.840292680327869,7.06943793911007,75.4204098360656,64.81967213114754,10.250117096018736,30.54332552693209,9.957137785484203,2.887007962529273,505,16,91,10,7,164,75,122,0.183,0.74,0.077,-0.8662,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,4,0,11,3,2,3,0,22,21,10,0,1,6,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,0,0,7,6,0,1,4,0,0,4,1,3,0,0,6,4,11,4,12,14,3,15,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,8,10,59,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.17162701129408384,0.0,0.21136557914333007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15656456127114154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200813814943046,0.19535563462776528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806703682879709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972569073342924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17850773954332974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806361898432927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17785369175557214,0.25128790065352624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998586189745632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3436913238543742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11739682114695413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16625715502908905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19701839301329926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266896607533775,0.0,0.17365370723812756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448405634666247,0.0,0.14045267772688708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013328987180582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23368486652247686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255315977929548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451139257046548,0.0,0.2792001445449955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792299602941046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jakebluz76,2020/02/18,"Nausea/Nervousness around Girlfriend Hey, this is my first post on here and this is one thing I’ve been struggling with for some time now. I have been dating my girlfriend for 3 months and despite the short amount of time of us being together I’ve fallen madly in love with her and her everything. Only recently when I went over to her house one day about 3-4 weeks ago have I gotten really nauseas around her. I went to her upstairs bathroom because I thought I was gonna throw up and I was over the trash can almost dry heaving, my mouth was producing so much saliva I was spitting it into the toilet. Since then it has gotten worse and has started happening when I’m around her and it‘s so bad that I get nauseas right away. It’s like I get this super nervous sinking feeling in my stomach and that’s all I can think about and I can’t get it out of my head. This past time that we hungout (Valentine’s Day) I was super nervous and actually threw up. Even though I know I’m okay, it’s like I have this mental block and today even over FaceTime I got nauseas too. I don’t understand and I want it to go away because I just want to relax and be able to have a good time with her like how I used to in the first two months of our relationship. If anyone could please help me figure this out, or give me some advice that’d be great. I’ve tried yoga breathing, and telling myself I’m okay, and pretending that everytime I breath out it’s black smoke which is like the bad energy in my bod",3.6932280178837535,4.7747511409836125,4.557146050670641,87.08275335320421,72.01639344262296,7.64381520119225,25.66691505216095,8.00094639256281,1.3408032786885236,1178,36,247,16,22,381,162,305,0.087,0.758,0.155,0.9443,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,3,0,0,5,17,18,1,3,6,2,25,7,6,3,1,45,51,23,0,4,3,0,1,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,21,25,0,1,6,3,0,6,2,6,0,5,14,2,40,12,36,31,5,49,0,0,1,1,18,21,0,5,25,165,61,1,0.112660197297736,0.0,0.10994010113375254,0.0,0.0,0.1100902409192232,0.0998664673771104,0.0,0.11281291386189975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877462943063775,0.0,0.0,0.3008743828315601,0.0,0.0,0.2116959278162753,0.0,0.1881331178480493,0.13735322119710805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995000029855425,0.0,0.0,0.14531301422291565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882199558305698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125172095974792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05696438081391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19165741253793156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17658090962970344,0.10807392695639832,0.06402738637956891,0.09449402836648392,0.09010465148388476,0.12420826524618908,0.0,0.0,0.09962504040437267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562186489518443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551375547363484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12999474163395522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191509811614158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22016032685319906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016802266089792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353498091492074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17984858928415015,0.0,0.08281820786227738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268293071553762,0.08568315670784889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754690608772796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366706541061535,0.0,0.0,0.10789732685630753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217300721815313,0.0,0.11123835340404192,0.12095488999591728,0.0,0.0962111929274066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319367940304288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974146750619075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777689936691728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846997813742332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484642908244292,0.07218810540900182,0.1106880718379609,0.08943961238824744,0.26277226813446874,0.0,0.1067886940271465,0.0,0.0,0.0764888787555887,0.0,0.11005264259296317,0.1172832385621968,0.13551634586495126,0.09730223831998867,0.0,0.0,0.13289980658253314,0.0,0.0903692147139003,0.0,0.0,0.20887426317843852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11481036587631555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,2spleens,2020/02/18,"Residual fear from rejection and I’m having a hard time (LGBT) I thought I was over it but apparently I’m not. I was in a relationship last year with someone who insisted that he was bisexual. After we’d been dating for a few months and we’d physically been intimate three times (which I did because I felt love, I don’t usually do hookups I’m too emotional) he told me my body was gross. My parts were gross and that I would always come “second” to men in terms of beauty and sex appeal. I broke up with him. I spent a lot of time working on myself and healing. I’m not upset with him being what is (I suspect) a gay man in denial. I just felt absolutely destroyed when he picked apart my body and compared me to three other males. I’m female. 

Then, recently I just started dating a new guy after talking for awhile. He is so much nicer and lovely. We are meshing really well. Flirty, fun. We confessed feelings and started dating He also identifies as bi. I’m fine with this. I am too . I just happen to keep running into people who are? I guess it’s my circles. But recently I’ve been increasingly anxious and tonight my anxiety is just peaking. I’ve noticed on his tumblr and stuff he never reboots women or m/f bi stuff. Just gay m/m. I’m getting paranoid this will be a repeat. 

We talked about intimacy before and he told me he’s inexperienced but insisted he was attracted to me. I told him about the last guy and what he did. I even have screenshots of my current bf telling me what he did was terrible. But I am so afraid I am not good enough or not the type of person he would want in that way. 

I feel this way because I creeped his blog tonight and he reblogged something about fucking a guy. I’ve sent him a few dirty/cheeky snaps over the past week (testing the waters) and he just called me cute. I... am very nervous and my anxiety is out of control. I am crying. I’m so scared. I just have some body issues and I just want to be desired. I don’t know how to bring it up because he keeps deflecting any mild flirtation that is sexual. Or being “polite”. I just want to know he wants me. we don’t have to do anything yet, I just want that affirmation I guess.

I’m realizing I’m traumatized from being picked apart. I remember my libido was so shot. But it’s back and I want to have that connection with my new bf. I feel like just putting this on the table will be weird. 

I need to calm down. Ugh.",1.0678522495834102,3.3984210101833017,3.104263654878725,88.70701573782635,84.31568228105904,6.096367339381598,22.98022588409554,7.417985360599375,1.0579862321792266,1880,69,391,31,55,633,228,491,0.11699999999999999,0.76,0.12300000000000001,0.5527,2,0,1,0,0,0,60.0,6,0,0,2,27,24,2,5,14,0,48,13,3,4,1,85,91,34,0,10,23,0,6,1,2,4,1,0,0,8,23,29,1,3,12,1,1,6,8,14,1,3,22,6,62,10,44,57,9,55,1,2,0,8,52,16,1,7,32,254,85,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995925362155965,0.07279195902351818,0.0,0.0,0.05949070021393879,0.0,0.13384684684847384,0.09882966010840613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199015984137462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726819058558975,0.0,0.15998448519315153,0.0,0.07444066397913622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29151804937962456,0.0,0.0,0.08932881347341952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535792122718586,0.0,0.0,0.09811840332857474,0.0,0.0,0.09609477277466118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984053765399911,0.0,0.09039220074548747,0.0,0.05778097798086476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844147270281177,0.13270045011586393,0.062497095592523165,0.1679927095154452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087561821219674,0.045705688468882726,0.0,0.0,0.07337567744574205,0.0,0.0,0.19274237828709093,0.2598625410483187,0.0773599660909691,0.0,0.07836661017903596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130838787671333,0.0,0.15551588632124438,0.0,0.0,0.09615554224806132,0.14261886908129956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04273924344424309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437399341384195,0.15791168265859867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982722773339932,0.0,0.0643092713030348,0.0648667294555539,0.06747144381754347,0.16898115197451308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09959873692508332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09473438591877326,0.08351138402921142,0.06064894295551725,0.07638583144376722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794348447953107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056043153091002766,0.0,0.1727556689045863,0.09392283456690437,0.09909995300188784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758465550721044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412314036156252,0.06734785003110592,0.0,0.0,0.12384029551775767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002917193287587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062929462439455,0.07646304722959175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945086650364414,0.15303421963508673,0.0,0.0,0.2507781483352505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634896699408073,0.07218173945489445,0.3095945905464304,0.1388781399955558,0.07017271318093228,0.0,0.0786567452698275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06368787402398374,0.0,0.0,0.12428928097024128,0.0,0.0,0.056335483283113184
mentalhealth,jayme-v,2020/02/18,"your opinion? hey y'all, so I wanted to hear your take on this. I'm constantly tired; I struggle to stay awake during the day and I feel like absolute hell if I don't have at least one nap during the day, although I can take up to three and even then I'll still feel tired. I can't sleep until 1 in the morning but if I don't set an alarm I'll wake up at 10 or so, however I do wake up multiple times throughout the night for no reason at all. i've had my iron levels tested and treated to no avail, i've had my thyroid checked and it's in perfect condition. i've tried exercising, eating healthy, getting sunlight, etc etc, but none of it did anything to help. I suppose I'm just not sure if this is mental health related or not, because doctors seem to think there's nothing ""medically"" wrong with me. I appreciate y'all taking the time to read this, and if you have any questions i'll try my best to answer them",3.040580357142858,4.0299829687500015,4.508571428571429,87.16500000000002,73.47916666666666,7.360714285714287,27.776785714285715,7.7094869923839395,1.4920910714285711,718,27,156,9,14,240,119,192,0.083,0.768,0.14800000000000002,0.9497,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,5,1,2,6,9,1,2,6,0,11,11,3,1,3,29,23,18,0,5,11,0,2,1,0,0,7,1,0,0,5,6,1,0,7,3,1,0,8,4,0,2,3,3,20,5,21,20,6,21,1,0,0,0,10,10,1,9,10,96,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965790428030252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059680643857032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933451477500529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15379345343507544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583667055620024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189023125966134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499984473999064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995554927490334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3268803001419361,0.09679380394131082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819849946340874,0.1046941714916524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656546502422931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15577404458332705,0.1651706427898308,0.0,0.09822827080836752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159612203019527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14763204632432408,0.14768626962841816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375257002915786,0.0,0.1406170955585608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930495558108897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641676926863584,0.0,0.14658800942279873,0.0,0.0,0.1506761127891193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334121151048551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14665418682436993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15620104366865964,0.11703370269844435,0.0,0.0,0.15320415589743314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812008682608887,0.0,0.3305583661607949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390226618690893,0.0,0.0,0.17090704437454146,0.3368715435044949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989934217708349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643801456760174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16022761666398355,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowawayMentalHLT,2020/02/18,"I have been having really horrible thoughts lately. Is there a kind of therapy that specifically assists with this? In addition to strong anxiety and mild depression, in recent years I have become a borderline racist, homophobe, and misogynist. Please don't judge me. Forces in my life have shaped me into this, and I really want to be better. 

However, when I search for types of therapy online, it doesn't seem like these are issues that therapists commonly deal with, so I really don't know where to start.  


With respect to the borderline misogyny, would it be bad for me to have a female therapist? It's not something I mind.

Any helpful advice is really appreciated.",5.64725,8.045922558333334,6.69166666666667,68.46000000000001,69.25,11.8,30.33333333333333,11.407655852321104,4.579233333333333,537,22,85,21,10,179,82,120,0.142,0.708,0.15,-0.1474,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,4,7,0,0,4,0,15,1,0,0,0,15,20,5,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,10,5,16,15,0,12,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,1,7,61,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636604365986598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389278263213733,0.0,0.1281224609837292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13983958954304795,0.0,0.1849695403528009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812328158170582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17266549547985086,0.1442510885466626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225894399747416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748065888539803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744056267558913,0.09204314483398704,0.0,0.1889257957174908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829674119810317,0.08182272768604376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16910800634575007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18384377896698986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4291703160365657,0.0,0.16536722358505285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246835798787906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893501029153012,0.0,0.0,0.11854387162851808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3830581028919103,0.3889165607729321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329611588679841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098784597924233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189736547909352,0.0,0.0,0.1078522345335698
mentalhealth,philodendronburgler,2020/02/18,"Mental health and society thoughts I just feel like the whole ""mental health crisis"" has been so horribly manipulated in society (coming from america atleast). Alot of people are suffering because of bad economy, loneliness, and an unsteady future. All things caused by the way our society is fundamentally run, but as soon as people start talking about solutions to rising accounts of depression and the likes, it's all about new SSRI'S or too much screen time or whatever BS they can come up with. (Dont get me wrong medication does work for some people) 
Its literally because corporations dont want you to feel good just so that they can trick you into buying more for the illusion of happiness, and to keep you obedient in your minimum wage job. 
The best thing you can do is be part of a community, preferably in person I'd say, but even this is a community. One where you can talk freely and you help people and theres the exchange and working togetherness that has made people survive for hundreds of years. The thing is that we can make a change as a community but not as individuals, which I think applies to mental health aswell. 
If you have been told that you need to fix your mental health alone and it's only your work that can change it I think that's wrong. It's normal to have some level of dependence on other people, and to need things from them, even as an adult. You deserve to be loved and feel comfortable BEFORE you can start healing.

Yeah that's basically it. Thanks for coming to my ted talk. 

Also,side thought, I think it's so important to sit with your feelings and ask WHY you feel some way instead of just immediately trying to stop feeling it",6.8807117794486174,7.4085997111111155,7.096106934001675,73.71593984962408,64.5873015873016,10.44110275689223,32.134502923976605,10.307518312809881,3.2348412698412687,1339,49,243,30,19,433,172,315,0.098,0.758,0.14300000000000002,0.9684,3,1,0,0,0,0,30.0,2,15,3,5,15,14,1,0,14,1,23,7,0,5,2,57,50,25,0,6,10,0,6,2,0,0,6,1,0,2,22,18,0,2,12,0,4,5,3,6,0,1,6,8,26,8,41,42,11,24,0,2,1,1,30,8,0,8,10,168,48,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605625093331075,0.0,0.0664470966949456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767799646785814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693767354111799,0.1013018674634572,0.0,0.0707035272876793,0.0,0.08719789924345323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535638719432279,0.17579654742884146,0.21472420670464906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156535309906464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271267771313818,0.0,0.1947618797976424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976041144726696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252077007225082,0.05935956058727696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043411130679429984,0.0,0.0,0.06969200615930853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884509215542701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35328342373315225,0.0,0.0,0.05569352055952463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245407065693466,0.07385426945723839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118721955413362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499202967228248,0.07862183058850454,0.05546326503984467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370450115373544,0.3349409788534789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610807598344269,0.12322046394988327,0.0,0.08024890463820995,0.0,0.0,0.08141062413333464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05630397990113997,0.06319374026338374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997844567542837,0.0,0.3456251433565525,0.07255104171814153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660765564034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762315440802773,0.0,0.0,0.06946701667969392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003539457824368,0.0,0.07649817034606203,0.0,0.0,0.2208053942365735,0.15972228003491662,0.0,0.13192846416226592,0.048450486358507135,0.0,0.0,0.07939611992599714,0.0,0.056412701432081415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490086744053234,0.13190605558797786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497586178626127,0.09276709267613982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18147167548953125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18169188950273252,0.0,0.0535072790415808
mentalhealth,CalypsoGoddess,2020/02/18,"Mental Health Advocacy Threads? I'm new to reddit and was looking for some Mental Health Advocacy threads because I am the president of the National Alliance on Mental Illness at my college campus. I was hoping to find other passionate individuals where we can discuss our advocacy, tips, and ideas. Does anyone know if something like this exists?

​

If not, does anyone have any ideas for a mental health related event that they would like to see or deem helpful? I'm always looking for new ideas for event my organization can put on, and would love to hear how others support, educate, and advocate for Mental Health.",9.48830303030303,9.739565345454542,9.152727272727274,62.0957575757576,59.18181818181819,11.333333333333336,40.15151515151515,10.864195022040775,4.755333333333334,508,24,74,11,6,164,71,110,0.022000000000000002,0.8009999999999999,0.177,0.9568,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,2,0,1,0,2,6,0,0,3,0,8,7,0,1,0,19,18,8,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,2,5,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,4,7,6,13,14,1,10,0,0,3,2,7,5,0,5,6,46,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115802655142476,0.11870213299691497,0.13312057203908467,0.07450074022479546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532059498991986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678333772343116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19174356540833665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013072535569814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46580476332821896,0.12347575679132387,0.0,0.07343199657943712,0.0,0.0,0.10881222616345046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3710207051698235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020822623061596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704547977392287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18399618690849973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887711193431327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5520252752560934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21161662009132315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101324184807252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730066271841788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434031977808701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243210205646107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15564858710674595,0.0,0.13312057203908467,0.0
mentalhealth,perhapsathrowaway_,2020/02/18,"My brain is screwing with me I have depression and anxiety. (That's all that's been formally diagnosed) I have a wonderful girlfriend, who has some anger issues, but I try to work on those with her. I think I love her and I want to love her, but I'm emotionally numb almost all the time. It's been a couple years since it started, but I've felt my emotions all dull to a point where I've become comfortable with it, and become anxious when they present themselves in a more prominent way. If I ever feel any love, it's barely there. It's not just my girlfriend, but my family, and friends too. I dont know why I am this way, but I really hate it. 

I miss being able to feel like I never wanted to leave someone. I can never spend much time with anyone and not just want to be alone for a long time. 

I've found myself disassociating from reality a bit. It's not too common, but sometimes I feel like I dont belong in this body, with my girlfriend, in my family. I feel like this is someone else's life and I dont understand why I'm living it. 

I'm hoping I'm not alone in feeling like this. Surely im not. If anyone has any sort of advice, ideas, anything, I'm open to listening. Thank you.",2.127754000385579,3.750973315789477,4.045725853094275,87.00597840755734,76.9757085020243,7.133911702332758,22.693078850973592,7.957251820313856,1.0499305571621371,927,27,199,15,21,315,125,247,0.11599999999999999,0.66,0.22399999999999998,0.9869,0,2,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,1,1,8,19,3,0,7,0,15,9,2,0,7,53,43,15,0,6,15,0,6,4,4,0,3,1,0,0,16,12,0,0,12,0,1,0,10,7,0,0,4,7,30,12,20,37,7,22,0,3,0,4,14,8,1,7,16,123,46,1,0.0944581188479842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230338052106514,0.0,0.0,0.09458616157925792,0.19566024809673532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12846951984708582,0.0,0.07226020237546721,0.10671078786363647,0.0,0.13209462591833446,0.0,0.0777309834585659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20864314214020496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10312380134370526,0.10492167598150784,0.0,0.10544649980983424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451611188316028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135663935293139,0.09587300230292252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33211263540743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890763769641426,0.21250533997752932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544277632736312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17809341578516716,0.0,0.2388043151922597,0.26992359591449794,0.0906946071051771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035684518333112,0.07297810830845781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325783663763727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381822520508634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663171869763187,0.1020309774503981,0.0985897350875725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05191171182563367,0.0,0.0,0.10001750918434213,0.0,0.0,0.0667185628007783,0.18458986242098868,0.0,0.08340824949573034,0.08359246275681195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557564204544652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943758584372071,0.0,0.14570384882776188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929345387353438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06051228967238576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813673201431952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16006811514343094,0.0,0.09342149482850128,0.0,0.06685794269387281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902565914830603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696434498672265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060524948506115686,0.0,0.0,0.16523786613698854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06413086230401661,0.0,0.0,0.09833423296523112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714153746603594,0.14995291615600362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704675204795381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024358005770565,0.06876663551209836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060827931607025765
mentalhealth,ElectMyDogToOffice,2020/02/18,"Who so you talk to when you can't talk to your only friend? I'm bipolar and have a sleep disorder. My only close friend in the world now is my wife. To make a long story short I feel like she was picking on me yesterday about my struggles.

You've got to understand I live on a razors edge regarding sleep. It's a sensitive, sensitive issue for me. So for my wife to start in on me about it really, really hurts. She didn't even have a reason, other than pettiness.

I got really upset and I feel like nobody understands me and I have no one to talk to. There are two older teenagers here and everyone looks at me like I'm an alien. I feel so fucking alone and isolated. On top of that I'm very discouraged. I feel like she stabbed me in the back.

Life is painful right now.",0.7652569444444453,3.030315456250001,2.7741666666666696,91.0052777777778,85.0625,7.055555555555558,20.13888888888889,8.167268648758528,1.065722222222222,603,18,132,14,18,202,91,160,0.16399999999999998,0.7290000000000001,0.107,-0.8655,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,3,0,1,12,12,1,2,8,0,9,6,2,3,0,16,24,9,0,0,0,2,4,4,2,0,3,0,0,0,5,6,0,1,7,0,0,0,3,6,0,2,4,5,23,6,21,20,0,21,0,2,1,1,14,13,1,0,12,84,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984735120166125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038275034256217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15475275219262438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918412457684234,0.0,0.0,0.12902417833591964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730950308815141,0.2893901567844833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20864320150713456,0.1248303760496119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21598701002250525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454930081206935,0.0,0.0,0.1409332088841458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537363234924996,0.263869677866212,0.0,0.11923140110277525,0.1194947324321493,0.11338875464591212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901316362344066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149785594759316,0.20538838474868226,0.1436783520982356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595054491083001,0.13883034519324192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153124036820981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27024922536137685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557287475080717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14115964006881265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3255889992487393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190185427319914,0.2811359414373369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141149680523524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RipDead,2020/02/18,I'm in a terrible state of mind I just want someone to talk to. I've been getting worse recently.,-0.6600000000000001,1.5318953809523812,2.3114285714285714,90.95857142857146,95.1904761904762,6.609523809523811,26.04761904761905,7.793537801064563,1.9615904761904759,77,4,17,2,3,27,18,21,0.28800000000000003,0.6509999999999999,0.06,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332363095972533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4507574905733638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4407864319202065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3782506793538444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3588159242124685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633104039828037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4549406744475932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TaxFreePwnage,2020/02/18,"Please help me, I started cutting again After a super shit Valentines day (I hate this part of the year) with my wife of 6 years (been together for  11), I was recently chastized for having my little brother over for dinner and a hang-out after, who I only see about twice a year.  Proceeded into being yelled at.  Proceeded into her leaving voicemails.  Proceeded into my brother leaving early.  Proceeded into me hiding in the basement.  Knife.  Cut.  Knife.  Cut.  The physical pain is more pleasant than the mental.

I need help.  I have a therapist appt on the 26th.  I cant miss work.  I hate myself.",2.323389610389608,5.182369572727279,3.8870129870129873,81.18909090909094,85.0909090909091,6.051948051948052,25.129870129870127,7.447530270364453,1.8567142857142849,463,19,75,8,14,153,76,110,0.184,0.679,0.138,-0.677,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,2,10,6,0,9,0,7,3,1,0,0,7,13,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,0,1,2,2,15,2,18,10,2,23,0,1,1,0,7,9,1,0,14,56,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264061365093997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870260427677222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627542242870197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4150791202406876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19644714501214064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19752557433166712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533421974480135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490696048291127,0.2085616983257327,0.0,0.0,0.21225284789395185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151531442053856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19352995408796272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15618952895762633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20119492567879751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13873238926259693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275753396552675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14269298847297404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3786597648263216
mentalhealth,brokenfingers-,2020/02/18,"How to Deal With Frustration sometimes i just really can’t handle everything going on and the only thing i want is to hurt. 
i just imagine going outside and punching the concrete ground until my fingers are broken but i don’t want to pay for medical bills or have to explain to anyone what happened. 
doing anything indoors is too loud and i don’t want my roommates to hear. 

i just want to get ride of this helpless and angry feeling but i dont know how. 
sorry if this is the wrong place to post i just made this throwaway to vent. i’m not sure what i’m even asking or saying.",3.5476923076923086,4.990359153846157,4.709059829059829,84.45538461538466,72.84615384615384,6.567521367521367,27.52991452991453,6.937597516519254,1.4131299145299139,459,17,87,4,9,151,74,117,0.195,0.7340000000000001,0.071,-0.9590000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,1,0,3,0,10,2,1,3,1,27,26,12,0,5,10,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,6,5,0,0,4,0,2,3,5,4,0,0,1,5,10,1,14,25,0,8,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,3,1,61,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480478659004416,0.0,0.15865155094264646,0.0,0.18023467890177386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198760289343686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259510187171146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127337427668532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732691951013475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748152742012813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007259655828987,0.0,0.21913649659033915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048550285547515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21729081741603665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20638803401421985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595354936702417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18242463805889025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19421785542987308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14662715315637598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20142681184738184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846416317744527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350761794660828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331609294569812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906764122420072,0.21581508010093015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18170436380878816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808256887288427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4548553308014333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21078800208970253,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I-Like-Them-Big,2020/02/18,"Out of options. Recently, my depression got worse. I think about suicide basically every day. Mainly because I can't think of any other solution.
Uni is shit. I would like to be a web dev, but here in the UK most employers want a degree, so I can't quit it.
I can't go to another uni, as I don't have enough money to travel.
I can't even find a decent job, I applied to 200 roles. 8 answers. 8 rejections.
Most importantly family. It's just bad. Way to long of a story.

I know, there are people that have it worse. I'm here sitting with my stupidi first world problems, and this makes me feel even worse. I should be happy, even with these issues, but no. I can't.

I don't know what to do. Psychotherapist are expensive. Medications are expensive. I don't have any real friends, they all just appear when they need help with uni stuff.

I started writing goodbye messages...",0.9334366789280112,3.4462420520231234,3.0964713610089336,86.86843799264322,88.01734104046244,6.382448765107725,22.314503415659484,7.686295010490155,1.3282393063583822,677,25,135,14,22,229,109,173,0.183,0.698,0.11900000000000001,-0.9117,3,0,0,0,0,1,34.0,0,0,2,2,11,8,1,0,5,0,20,2,1,1,1,29,33,6,1,5,4,0,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,7,1,3,3,9,5,0,1,1,1,19,3,16,28,5,14,0,2,0,0,7,3,1,4,7,89,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041802838590157,0.1574191427707686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534809681421846,0.09151480114344143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681819970629267,0.0,0.12930243482398995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551192467098447,0.0,0.2974684222077858,0.0,0.12648677981004408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152448079404098,0.0,0.07590770623374364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721152208989154,0.1276962407085114,0.0,0.0,0.11598619569568595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531949205402267,0.0,0.12006866953361885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15981084455157027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062561701188054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15669148697470078,0.14897588896588984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650095379632687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334348752816068,0.0,0.0,0.1328558929345701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020959727555548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123513454790632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131577864785122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040777663052731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436493416263112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15967640724805265,0.0,0.1708751063752277,0.0,0.0,0.14823031746282908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410114597414365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062592413649035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17185719768000954,0.16421237395309196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923880649860051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885476093345412,0.11916223016425682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4589705742961341,0.10664448635616684,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shadoerose,2020/02/18,"i keep feeling heaviness sadness & sorrow in my heart like i lost something. what do i do to make it go away? i have prostate problems, depressson, anxiety & struggling with ptsd & my sister has cancer. im worried about school. i take care of my mom. and long story short i feel heaviness and sadness in my heart and i cry unexpectedly. i could be in class and i just start crying. i keep having panic attacks. its hard to control my breathing. my mom is getting old. i mean shes healthy but im afraid of losing her. im afraid to lose my sister. i keep feeling ache pains of sadness. i dont know how to describe it. i feel as if my heart is filled with sadness and the feeling of sadness and sorrow its worse than psychical pain. i cant control it. i dont know if im going crazy.",0.1914511575381148,2.5799932298136667,2.2156437041219657,92.21201439864485,91.85714285714286,4.417955957086392,23.467250141163177,6.1124844417494595,0.6051217391304347,614,26,126,6,22,204,88,161,0.37,0.573,0.057,-0.9951,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,5,3,20,1,4,1,0,13,8,5,4,0,29,32,11,0,4,4,4,6,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,8,0,5,8,0,0,3,3,18,0,0,1,6,26,2,17,29,0,11,0,10,0,1,6,5,0,2,4,73,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124689377968716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353883227876097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10936122544111566,0.0903168639011129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801046912535852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21563489841515548,0.07675161273692684,0.0,0.21118756382633555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253262016066179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430299100342703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05022371520344548,0.0,0.10926526175989892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611318290875196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34174189067542626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4153455811803963,0.0,0.0,0.2563330466904739,0.0,0.0,0.10566055847484652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04696403582708927,0.0,0.0,0.08507161475275378,0.0,0.21508872464575965,0.10493674469100127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06416721204947315,0.0,0.0,0.10471324655130483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251715025682924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008717777930158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045772088732357,0.1127872987777445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198298382096383,0.1123702838953725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728822301511436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400521363614206,0.0,0.0,0.06804098068699793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004954634748448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227744795438479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976242105204744,0.09796421023542212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,neumonia-pnina,2020/02/18,"I’m a genuinely awful person and I can’t stop myself For as long as I can remember everything I do has been reduced into pure strategy in my head. I’m very clever. I’ve sorted out how a lot of this works. I get away with lying because I have realistic lies and reasonable excuses, and I’m cautious. I can call attention to myself in a way that doesn’t make me look like an attention whore. I pretend I do it on accident.

Worse still is that I get pleasure from making other people feel uncomfortable or like they messed up. It makes me feel like I have control, because I always feel like I’m messing up somehow and I don’t want to be alone.

I’m manipulative as hell. These traits are not okay but I don’t know what to do about them. I know that someday, I’m going to be the abuser in an abusive relationship. I hate myself. I am an awful person and I need help.",1.7011304633585311,3.6932466648044695,4.139934275386136,84.13535655603026,79.55865921787709,7.116792638843247,23.93723299375616,8.124751697461798,1.4905455800197176,679,24,139,13,17,237,108,179,0.249,0.6629999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.9809,0,1,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,2,2,4,12,2,0,7,3,18,2,1,7,1,33,39,11,0,2,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,9,8,0,2,9,1,0,1,5,5,0,0,1,4,25,7,21,36,1,14,1,0,1,1,8,9,1,4,7,92,34,1,0.0,0.3553177094334291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529653051130207,0.0,0.0,0.12476523277659793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408771127208256,0.0,0.0,0.18280866736318815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15310935927782396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817469395215187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13475979678932076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22744823426054406,0.21423972603740973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15667886776319406,0.0,0.08521650294608002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803843513123408,0.15388557221532626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050415188963543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16481035504846528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930198185925373,0.0,0.0,0.13269552266549264,0.1259150069286279,0.0,0.0,0.12747683570111265,0.0,0.0,0.3002659029914575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118140943787486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395213409567608,0.2618502419432474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15416717408617447,0.0,0.16098349975704984,0.16985706759775104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974529262719055,0.125359710170123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371931798675725,0.08844072356815566,0.1190183895073375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091608542240457,0.0,0.1528055170632664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GodsBringerbitch,2020/02/18,"Do autistic or normal people have emotional sets and images they operate from? My wife asked me if I had a personality disorder last night, I guess because I talk to myself a lot and my behaviors and especially my emotions can change a lot. I also still sleep walk as an adult... I think I’m pretty stable, so I said “no, of course not”, but I’ve started thinking about how my sense of self operates and for me it works like this: I have different emotional sets that have accompanying vibes: soldier, junkie, detective, doctor.... many more, but they all have an emotional range of what I can feel for the day or time that I occupy them, like  as a soldier I can’t feel the same level of sadness as if I was occupying a different set like a doctor. There’s a scale of emotions that each have access too. It’s like archetypes I’m operating from, but I’m aware of it, sometimes I use these consciously to get a job done, but many times I just let it play out how it’ll play out, but I do know which I occupy by the accompanying images that go in my mind. Along with these archetypes I do have body dysmorphia( sometimes I feel really fat, or thin, tall or short, ugly or beautiful) and there can be distortions in my perception of self. I can do everything to anyone if I’m sufficiently motivated. I know a lot of people say they couldn’t kill or hurt a child or dig thru sewage. Which I’ve always considered social posturing and I’ve always thought anybody can do anything, they just pretend that they can’t to make others feel better about them. I’m pretty much able to turn empathy/morality/disgust on and off like a light switch. I know I’m not a psychopath, because I feel really deep empathy when I want to and that’s my natural state. I also don’t have a good pain sense anymore, somethings that should hurt a lot don’t,( cuts that need stitches, twisted ankles)  and somethings that shouldn’t hurt at all, freak me out and I’ll think I have a broken bone when I don’t, or a broken tooth..... Anyways, do most people operate like this? Am I just mildly autistic like I’ve always thought of myself?",5.3751164090147165,5.8844363728813605,6.233571428571429,78.66320497299313,67.83777239709443,9.74367666232073,30.17032967032967,9.757249324022393,2.7003507915813003,1654,59,325,35,26,547,194,413,0.125,0.736,0.139,-0.3246,4,0,2,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,7,3,17,19,2,0,21,0,34,8,5,5,2,73,64,36,1,9,21,1,6,7,0,3,4,3,0,5,22,16,1,0,16,3,0,2,10,8,0,0,6,10,45,11,36,52,11,28,0,4,0,0,18,13,0,17,16,212,67,5,0.07975379747684093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755816605595258,0.19908464533272044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909433661235718,0.05576570956396264,0.0,0.06563057985949329,0.0,0.07455903466956479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723434938779417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053575274465927,0.0,0.08858848979013384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436894275433797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051434601505515966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16665148726559567,0.09140476145343587,0.16326278235061142,0.0,0.08161582474585916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4485614379688863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716775706176366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016295816888969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04166806746504998,0.0,0.04532592103307279,0.06689370143028206,0.0,0.0,0.08785779944337213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561342691186954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07914333778293252,0.0,0.08823576039996214,0.0,0.13149180405383654,0.06500998954117701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155366140516797,0.0,0.2727457384908777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271215306368092,0.0,0.0,0.05323627911417813,0.16171566557604475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08052860019960091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05862821773502892,0.0591364302723791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484353626160742,0.0781417881927455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486366357617463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587372369250974,0.06963793970940341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227656808339816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218464975272748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586412483632947,0.06342342083662135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16640120885053666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798113947155694,0.08129895289509423,0.0,0.1227967394313616,0.15775709000783336,0.0,0.056450148344650834,0.0,0.06369148568718523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410308139172971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330903931788353,0.0,0.12663121322197055,0.09301016134359154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674922977533872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888167423058147,0.0,0.0,0.04704085610148172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05806171442628375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slimewhisperer,2020/02/18,"Just want to vent Lately I can’t stop thinking about that my apartment is bugged, walking around looking for the cameras and mics. My plan is to find them and then sue them. However I’m worried it won’t work, even if I do find them and present them as evidence, they’ll say something ridiculous like I put them there, or a higher up member will get everyone there to not trust me ahead of time. It is an an entire organization that has been collecting video and audio recording and tracking everything I do for probably years now. They would probably never let me get away with suing these people. They have an entire storyline or prophecy they want me to follow and get me to do something horrible as part of it, then convict me for it, but I’m not lying down and taking this or doing anything they want. They’re involved directly with the devil Choronzon I’m possessed with and use it to show off their mind reading technology all the time to taunt me or manipulate me. But another hub or mountain in me I can hear is Jesus and also wants to use this body to carry out a prophecy 11 years from now. My brain feels like a giant landscape with hills and mountains, and the very tall mountains are so high they reach into heaven and Jesus enters and becomes them, the way God becomes colored windows on big buildings in the city. There’s smaller hills like Luke and Matthew. I feel like I’m flowing through the individual points of the landscape, like a 3D geometry with different topographies. Called it hubs and bands, energy transferring data or information between all the vertices or points of the landscape, and it doesn’t stop at the borders of my brain, I figured out those borders only exist on one zoom level and if you go up or down they disappear. So thoughts are just flowing into everything and everyone around me. It gets very obvious. The organization takes advantage of this and uses the devil to channel it.

Past couple nights I’ve heard very loud sounds outside my window and I was sure it was them, and they were on the roof coming to break into my window. I was frozen with fear at first but I thought to myself I’m not dying tonight just because I was too afraid to do anything. I got a weapon and sat staring at the window prepared to make sure I got the first move and take them by surprise for a long time but they didn’t ever come in. I think they are messing with me. All doctors seem to be involved with it too, including my therapist. I don’t want to see anymore because I can’t trust her but it is a lot to deal with without talking to someone about it. I will be testing her at our next session and figuring out if she is a part of it. If she is I’m dropping her and just staying the hell away from “mental health” services. I know for a fact the doctors are involved with it already, so it’s most likely that she is too. I recognize this all looks exactly like paranoid delusion but I know for a fact this is going on, in fact they are using that whole thing as a “plot device”. Making me hear voices and hallucinate and act like a schizophrenic is exactly what the devil does. I didn’t even know that before, when I researched it I found out it does that. I don’t know entirely my goal posting here I just wanted to vent about my situation since I don’t have anyone to talk to about it and can’t trust my therapist. Thank you",5.9213221884498495,6.277418905775079,6.247992401215807,79.56682142857143,66.62917933130699,8.890030395136778,32.86337386018237,8.697196308434329,2.6071117325227973,2672,108,506,38,40,860,297,658,0.085,0.8290000000000001,0.086,-0.7267,2,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,1,2,20,7,28,26,3,2,34,0,47,7,3,7,14,126,99,56,1,11,27,0,2,8,0,5,4,8,4,0,34,49,0,2,17,5,0,13,15,9,0,3,15,15,77,17,86,76,9,78,7,0,5,0,42,36,1,15,32,363,111,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697634418869324,0.05578302447135002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314416830808294,0.0,0.0,0.0691781867239604,0.048774297051342085,0.0,0.11480479394051812,0.12419342479029362,0.0,0.0,0.13107418140204755,0.0,0.0,0.0850439647897714,0.1540777684440118,0.05935634194833661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748204676563504,0.0,0.15573923220551833,0.0712276236527598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017546060927975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718254777135511,0.0,0.0,0.07191431135113427,0.0,0.0,0.07239464618352251,0.07287909727587201,0.0,0.14279433555245682,0.12208608899410077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921449998915314,0.06309736409804634,0.0,0.1333077266293573,0.12538253878804353,0.0,0.0,0.07849373451697872,0.07054041767622253,0.09966592930464427,0.0,0.0,0.1275095580994983,0.11866708404446012,0.0,0.07648272440679818,0.0,0.0,0.14577637160805065,0.0,0.07928671414310877,0.0,0.11157884382185072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414627143870309,0.1572378421162298,0.0,0.0,0.0736999558354499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533420294989121,0.0,0.07868664470414642,0.0,0.0,0.07132918307867728,0.0,0.27263003986108536,0.0,0.0,0.061730953570732584,0.11715321346845906,0.0,0.0,0.05930318120715077,0.0,0.0,0.09312396853643028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07029660342279022,0.0,0.0704326350005292,0.0,0.0,0.0741384940883596,0.0,0.0,0.05379933327978576,0.0,0.07418520216615099,0.0654603142063407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047267773083885564,0.053051798120422884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15107567032009264,0.06658901200029635,0.048359313370469136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188198728570935,0.0,0.06680597940189753,0.0,0.1504153116892525,0.0,0.0,0.07012301150831096,0.0,0.0,0.06977384689082751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055471952066700005,0.0,0.0,0.05558568004713519,0.06350230506138413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057702032181743225,0.0784075091293676,0.0,0.0,0.05910315989146162,0.10740156796699224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743495170446693,0.0,0.11663655702476493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314864678045415,0.0,0.1573411694435508,0.11213280555931704,0.0,0.0642210046891707,0.0,0.16198179354427394,0.04634210267550258,0.08939233665053231,0.0,0.11075530927434946,0.12202405224385073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409835912847245,0.0,0.17266546725233156,0.24685973229604194,0.05536824852231002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778789331405466,0.0,0.06724130206593018,0.0,0.05078244908709676,0.07083955823024687,0.0,0.04955192946593148,0.0,0.0,0.08983982761127618
mentalhealth,N7Crusader,2020/02/18,"Venting off I guess I'm not one to disperse my feelings and let loose. But I'm tired of holding everything in, even though I dont trust anyone I know. I'd feel too embarrassed. I'm in a constant loop of fighting my... thoughts with the only thing holding me back is my brother. I've lost interest in everything, I find little enjoyment, I dont know who I am anymore. My extreme social anxiety doesnt help, either. I'm not proud of where I come from and I'm not confident about anything. Nobody even knows who I truly am except myself. Even then I don't know myself",2.5866086956521737,4.429985095652178,4.286304347826088,84.81467391304348,76.30434782608695,7.034782608695654,28.02173913043478,7.908726449838941,1.8946695652173904,446,19,87,7,10,150,73,115,0.213,0.7070000000000001,0.08,-0.9029,0,0,0,0,2,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,8,7,1,1,2,0,8,1,0,0,0,21,23,5,0,0,6,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,8,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,2,2,16,4,12,20,1,10,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,1,3,57,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294614600978437,0.0,0.16783194831535267,0.11833044041039108,0.0,0.13926291765830687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13012840237035098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457777563195694,0.0,0.1828788848379054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39667558151747867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353269778743124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041883108831783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113683220434373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467431699287618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18642732573316684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134321545759311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720203258886366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17305044168916522,0.0,0.0,0.16961419348810305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18473592474401151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467548984554155,0.12870800843207764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725099703061421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11242973760059333,0.0,0.16626886579384936,0.13435072688415325,0.0,0.1945064525750528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sushi1735,2020/02/18,"Please pray for me In 4 days, it will be my birthday, and it would mean a lot to me if my depression and mental health issues went away as it has been a daily struggle for me. I believe in the power of praying as well as God, and I'm hoping people's prayers can help me out 😢 I've done several things such as partake in hobbies, sleep, distract myself, etc and nothing seems to be helping out.",4.403780487804877,4.408682060975611,5.484048780487806,84.95485365853662,69.85365853658537,7.5356097560975615,31.03414634146341,6.742157984588678,1.6848848780487802,307,12,64,2,5,102,61,82,0.091,0.698,0.21100000000000002,0.8316,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,2,3,0,8,2,1,0,0,12,13,9,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,3,0,8,2,15,6,2,8,2,1,0,0,2,6,0,4,1,47,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961277541227759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23519007421328966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462665729255632,0.0,0.1797963051673124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21362400691549585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232811736225232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218917797280769,0.0,0.0,0.2798418168775347,0.0,0.0,0.2073361238048922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178810510998692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17747201802952173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22739024569650565,0.0,0.0,0.2103711776689519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003015179912824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447211559258531,0.0,0.0,0.22914511439245275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19003840939668226,0.0,0.23582839129015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20890103101628213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21823111099638054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13868440636977228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876915662844091,0.19351359543765054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14829020535773535,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whatamidoing3789,2020/02/18,"How would you describe feeling guilty? I'm a recently diagnosed sociopath.. I've had a lot of realizations of what I thought were real emotions actually being me reflecting or manipulating the situation through emotions based on what Ive seen and know will get the response I want (or hope to get anyway). 
That being said, despite whatever shit I've done, I realized what I thought was me feeling guilty was really me feeling badly about getting caught but I've never really felt ""guilty"" about my actual actions. 
So, can anyone try and describe or explain to me what it feels like? What's your thought process? How to react/handle it? Examples? 
Thanks in advance",5.529499999999999,7.898926283333335,6.200000000000002,71.985,69.5,9.133333333333336,36.16666666666667,9.642632912329526,4.073066666666668,534,29,84,13,10,174,80,120,0.065,0.794,0.141,0.7987,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,0,1,6,5,1,0,4,0,11,2,1,3,1,27,31,9,0,3,4,0,5,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,8,2,0,0,12,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,12,7,12,3,10,15,1,7,0,0,1,0,4,2,1,5,3,56,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.3169190368075588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353991594776495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558057043141555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16481234641390255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16617118214955404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3653114314342597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284169563919182,0.11600434983402615,0.15591032558741078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.254510643620226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16128004194113849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923983631296181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933069690906927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804972325090026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252375154110927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848240618221678,0.20804965335855846,0.0,0.1603307230633639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544606250815815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666808017538188,0.0,0.1825219948705965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949774605288385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38673489725155336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102454042325289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577596859494916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535013822319408,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Notanotherasshole,2020/02/18,"ADD/ADHD/Anxiety/OCD/PTSD disorder leads to dementia? Are any of you aware of studies linking these disorders to early onset dementia?

What say you?",4.641794871794873,7.923052923076928,6.3976923076923065,64.63064102564104,77.46153846153845,11.158974358974357,35.5897435897436,10.504223727775694,5.7748358974358975,120,7,16,5,3,41,22,26,0.134,0.866,0.0,-0.5007,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3970946075647457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22469352301779766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7573684066989906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862374406039776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627592612388239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigstoolbigtool,2020/02/18,"I feel like i’m drowning It feels like every traumatic, angry, frustrated and emotionally painful moment in my life has finally affected me these past weeks. I have always held myself to the standard of being a man, of not crying, brushing off these experiences. Nothing in particular, just all of these moments coming at once into my life and I feel like i’m drowning. School is kicking my ass, work is kicking my ass, my brain is especially kicking my ass. I believe I have ADHD and that adds to my frustration because when i attempt school work, it feels impossible, i can’t focus, same with many other activities, i can’t keep myself busy i cannot focus. My emotions are just coming over me as stress builds up and i just want to disappear with no responsibilities for months. I know that sounds like everyone’s dream but to me, it feels like it’s the only thing i can do. my grades are slipping, relationships, everything. I just feel like i’m drowning in bullshit and emotions and i don’t know what to do. please help. anyone, anything, please.",3.4826142131979694,6.1474692791878205,4.663682741116752,79.17024492385791,77.02030456852792,7.1887309644670045,27.616497461928937,8.238735603445708,2.224356548223351,836,35,146,16,20,274,109,197,0.141,0.725,0.134,-0.1338,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,3,5,10,2,1,3,0,16,7,4,1,1,33,32,9,3,1,6,0,6,6,0,0,3,1,0,1,12,12,0,2,8,1,0,3,6,4,0,0,1,8,28,6,20,30,2,18,0,0,0,3,3,8,3,0,13,95,40,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322224984793273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154534177566864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692844819142748,0.0,0.0905369751765355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670670889673385,0.0,0.0,0.12395471333587472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281855588285967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18954474496332133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085165634392896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3712726219529123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269648197580484,0.10512869648052987,0.09887876117530067,0.10762053981821904,0.0,0.0,0.3337760989704077,0.3929910702194236,0.0,0.12052138515315428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374399686397372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977907117476027,0.0,0.0,0.12092808184870407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542056964525724,0.32250089439735785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154287552586252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781680715635362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055670283977784,0.0,0.0,0.11716756631766916,0.0,0.08367506555497804,0.1170688940892332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502641082435007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24153754840073716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812016198367285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226919555509914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602738444871575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309231009524343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489256731024881,0.0,0.08825129997392847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16019154512952766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,denveray,2020/02/18,"Can I go to a psychiatrist without telling my parents? I am a 21 year old college student living in a dorm. I think I need to see a psychiatrist, I don't know if I have social anxiety disorder, depression or even ADHD. I have extreme difficulty forming sentences when talking to people and I am constantly forgetting things. Sometimes I have absolutely no motivation to do anything or to get out of bed. I also experience a lot of brain fog and have been feeling this way for a few years. I don't want to tell my parents I am going to a psychiatrist but I am on their insurance. If I get prescribed something, will it show up on the insurance?

There's a few reasons I don't want to tell my parents (they're alcoholics, I don't think they would understand, they could be contributing to the reason I may be depressed, etc). But if I have to tell them I will, I just wanted to get some advice first.",5.4554545454545424,5.8798424858757095,6.9521212121212175,73.87899845916796,67.64406779661017,10.278171545968156,35.86492039034412,10.230975488527342,3.7629706214689267,708,35,134,17,11,244,101,177,0.107,0.866,0.027000000000000003,-0.8768,3,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,4,2,5,2,0,0,10,0,23,2,1,3,0,30,38,11,0,9,9,3,1,0,0,4,1,0,2,0,3,3,1,0,8,1,0,2,6,2,0,1,1,2,27,0,20,30,6,14,0,2,1,0,13,5,0,8,6,105,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845390074373688,0.12070789581120465,0.0,0.13201141920763745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878346699400534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449683132292072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165113563178488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13789554662948547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334874110023978,0.0,0.09862522938997237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21278502891499668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415711673397653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13776382105944104,0.08158756755939868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083184873910995,0.0,0.0,0.06245831135277845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507090724348712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936112580357534,0.0,0.140405017186573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788650065746868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907546650068672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501714274070664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159275001480398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296194551365312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4114820535818854,0.0,0.0,0.0856371751344892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540100095502737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843399927330317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12591890708803374,0.0,0.09509612776392937,0.12217008738604322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928528796966768,0.43186766646336666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206499402751953,0.1583005765772019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859462221682094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21857599555165247,0.09804896027515678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907437802472028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774912144466337,0.0,0.0,0.15909301673206408
mentalhealth,cinnabon4lyfe,2020/02/18,"Why the F is it so hard to get help? Back about 3 years ago I used to see someone for depression and ADHD. They fell out of my network, I felt fine without meds, and I stopped going.

Friends and family have told me that I've reached a new low. I'm blocking people out of my life, deleting numbers from my phone except critical work ones, and not responding to anyone. My cousin who's a psychiatrist keeps telling me that I need to get help now.

So I tried. I called 20 fucking places. 2 of them called back saying that they aren't accepting new patients. The other 18 didn't even have the fucking decency to call me back. What the fuck.

I can tell something is wrong with me. I was the polar opposite of what I am now in college. How the hell do I fix this before I hurt myself?",2.2295148247978456,4.04100503773585,3.4594115004492387,90.48863207547173,77.23899371069183,6.5554357592093435,25.19362084456425,7.447530270364453,1.1185054806828396,607,22,130,8,14,197,108,159,0.18,0.7390000000000001,0.081,-0.9541,0,0,1,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,3,1,10,11,4,0,8,0,10,4,0,2,0,18,23,7,0,1,3,1,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,9,7,0,3,2,0,0,2,4,8,0,1,4,4,23,3,18,19,0,17,1,3,1,3,17,5,4,0,10,83,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16094628191833174,0.0,0.1187123438288541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936402492204688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30892953629751896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395638663960338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4102430685903237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115345434105066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845315336047113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624822336797986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12858457417536046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034665597049676,0.3714217227276127,0.1399357509290636,0.0,0.07611004279997594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996636316543673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17952802655456326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433645453554054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903459428566725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459193066883477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875536107898535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930027093733912,0.0,0.2586822908324713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09074792091852033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284353501547543,0.0,0.13991830214778378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649886785254564,0.0,0.0,0.10671721064936916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347031031790945,0.10309845758014402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196344107757754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341046441009652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12796666993936365,0.0,0.09092315280993077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156642171705285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12084232034971636,0.0,0.0,0.1290944752465534,0.0,0.09749563758009427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642092130148576,0.0,0.08624033923634343
mentalhealth,parkofadown,2020/02/18,"PTSD disgnose Usn veteran diagnosed C-PTSD with dissociation.Symptoms of schizophrenia, basically top the charts with schizophrenia, anxiety, depression, maybe ADHD. How do you get over this, nothing makes me happy ever, short term memory problems, constantly thinking people can hear my thoughts, constantly worrying, constantly thinking I am doing something when in reality I am not. Been to therapy for years and been on every pill just about. What can I do?",9.838243243243241,11.996597689189189,9.317135135135137,54.623810810810824,58.59459459459461,13.487567567567568,44.52972972972973,12.688352899677879,7.0836140540540535,375,22,46,14,5,120,62,74,0.172,0.805,0.023,-0.8933,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,1,5,3,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,2,1,12,15,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,1,6,1,9,12,1,12,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,7,33,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20474807829014036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303303215405192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5523187482795765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673688445029145,0.17291896239467244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410674404422325,0.14354158155444371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900974830021867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18135888518099635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920160393025204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372132408991,0.0,0.17115659352874982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634717725336676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811105636927895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16301825153001426,0.3982999125188196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311568730424192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17707658999919607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948295612466577,0.0,0.0,0.2183286440034531,0.0,0.13525240191776436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17301600192729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971078995593694
mentalhealth,UnusualAddiction,2020/02/18,"Confused. Is there anyone here who is really into fire? How do I know if it's not good? Should I worry? I like to start fires a lot. Almost got caught but luckily I got away. I feel so alone. Nobody understands me?

Help?
_UnusualAddiction_",-0.6733333333333321,0.00017913043478756666,2.065869565217394,87.07894927536232,127.2608695652174,5.011594202898551,12.528985507246375,6.42735559955562,0.01723768115942015,184,4,36,4,12,63,40,46,0.166,0.596,0.239,0.7,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,12,11,4,0,2,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,3,6,2,3,7,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,4,2,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29269769837950205,0.30273616841026113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043839834974153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746268521349828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477964054208869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24516860407785476,0.4675603740703898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959235132440824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606412430381887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280373305332575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24850425617467756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872558058711318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068924842508526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30429613783110365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29684633045667996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,harambepride89,2020/02/18,"Is there any way to politely decline a wedding invitation because of depression? This is my best friend's wedding but I ve been having severe depression. I ve been seeking help but I don't know if I can emotionally handle being single and going to the wedding.

He's aware of my issues but I still feel selfish. But I find it hard to get out of bed somedays.",1.9138380281690144,4.4676367746478896,4.158573943661973,81.05504401408452,82.66197183098592,6.366901408450705,27.184859154929576,7.645422480735847,1.9974915492957748,285,13,51,5,8,98,51,71,0.21600000000000005,0.7040000000000001,0.08,-0.8859999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,0,0,10,12,6,0,1,5,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,2,8,2,7,9,2,4,0,2,0,0,6,1,0,1,1,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841353782871238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650611137268671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841602573409525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4664339239767445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045839294127621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13691130150362044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24748222549068236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20919906287579068,0.0,0.1414680648542654,0.0,0.15388691452187947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425600196081633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18149388083573986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28261735837707785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14881012563793813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3058971702233452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21624019965449165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21492753280707014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shagstotz,2020/02/18,Do you think it is really important if your therapist is either a man or a woman? I’m a 23 y/o guy and i’ve read it is good to have a same-sex therapist since they have probably gone through the same situations as you most part. But i started going about a year and a half with a woman who I had started to become really open with and I stopped going because of X reasons going on in my life atm. Today i’m ready to go back but idk if i should find a man to help me. This therapist already has a bit of background on me so I would rather go back with her because of that but i’m still not sure and I want to go back to therapy ASAP,0.9556190476190488,2.326619800000003,3.7100000000000013,89.24333333333334,79.57142857142857,7.238095238095237,23.095238095238088,8.07648339933343,1.1158095238095245,492,16,115,9,12,175,85,140,0.054000000000000006,0.8759999999999999,0.07,0.4535,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,1,0,7,2,0,0,10,0,10,1,0,1,1,27,24,12,0,6,9,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,5,8,0,1,3,1,1,7,1,0,0,1,2,0,14,2,18,20,5,20,0,0,0,0,12,4,0,4,9,79,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15050494851764415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31461642269970197,0.0,0.16627884419978678,0.15062722744103574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14889779860719676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12465400688703668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4650666236236205,0.11439380659309675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504322911114308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141642163107637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963332130684522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14769236070796649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470467906774247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642255091304373,0.0,0.1747442705466022,0.14022715602246347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128196132774039,0.15330317709015787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19306892020677888,0.0,0.10891775069317068,0.11402450451047795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854185448960426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559688689212817,0.4750627304100569,0.0,0.08739041303702551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927764242934595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044378588401138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688444770692813,0.0,0.0,0.0878278825266376
mentalhealth,luria_neumer,2020/02/18,"Did your antidepressants change your personality/emotions? So... I‘ve been struggling with depression for over 10 years now and recently I‘ve been diagnosed with borderline (this was no news to me though, it just became “official”). Now, for the first time, I’m taking meds (SSRIs, Sertraline fyi) and I am a little bit terrified if they somehow are going to change my personality or make me numb. For example, I am really happy about my intense emotions and I don’t want to lose them... 

Are these thoughts understandable?
Any experiences or insights? 

(Not native, please excuse my mistakes.)",6.2154555555555495,9.112841990000003,6.4433333333333325,68.65722222222222,69.1,10.044444444444443,32.111111111111114,10.25414643259724,4.0937777777777775,469,21,71,14,9,150,77,100,0.16399999999999998,0.7440000000000001,0.092,-0.8711,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,2,2,7,6,0,1,2,0,9,2,0,1,0,18,16,8,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,5,0,12,1,10,11,1,9,0,2,0,0,6,2,0,4,6,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665346174236272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20333206575004195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3940465078189509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041314736816048,0.1890354637232513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41900268606790975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18218403106073075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15842049615707648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584772259601144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19826200947396955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866671185821477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083612970228546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432045009322015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20687698515080766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16262256025951066,0.0,0.20444184862155454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931376367073937,0.0,0.18389515860208985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19470444254125974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003358684729064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18298545333611274,0.14785828090879102,0.10860136465096036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19388834063753987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985253854357198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993612364749955
mentalhealth,FlightofIcarus102,2020/02/18,Why do I have evil thoughts all the time? It happeneds all the time randomly. The thoughts are basically what would happen if I kill/rape/ inappropriate touching/ punch in the face/ stomp on them/ etc. I would never do any of it and I hate having these thoughts.,3.655714285714288,6.379447224489797,3.4034285714285737,88.11657142857145,76.75510204081633,6.3689795918367365,26.126530612244892,7.554174236665415,1.3296824489795922,210,8,41,3,5,63,36,49,0.162,0.838,0.0,-0.8442,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,4,0,7,1,1,0,3,11,13,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,1,5,0,3,8,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,29,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16259221474521096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666531688603925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4228603184737101,0.0,0.0,0.2360559643923115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264522242236194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844041412002257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5694421225599751,0.2788354326843605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157452735083249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33969123559427283,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yeetus68,2020/02/18,I keep hearing people saying my name Even when I’m alone. It’s almost like it’s through an old badly tuned radio but I keep hearing it multiple times a day. I’ve been to a few sessions but I haven’t mentioned this. I don’t know if I need advice but I need to get this off my chest,-0.4076190476190469,1.5378644285714285,1.9676190476190487,96.98571428571432,87.25396825396825,4.234920634920635,18.52380952380953,5.288315135182226,-0.5268666666666668,221,6,52,1,7,75,43,63,0.069,0.899,0.031,-0.2374,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,3,1,1,0,0,11,12,5,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,8,1,4,11,1,5,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,5,30,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278825516941672,0.0,0.0,0.2335183796515339,0.24152721357384224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947141481180412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503961668127598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15402789483660434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12183855695988875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5256717963714294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4145617713781633,0.0,0.0,0.12816186456939055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393084583660043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34583304513410346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24470654539384734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616730857445383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854517989987232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598211448388833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaylol101092,2020/02/18,"I’ve hated myself for my entire life, and I don’t know why This is a weird post, but I really need this off my chest. I’ve hated myself for my entire life, and it’s getting to the point where I think there is a deeper reason to why. Many friends have helped me, and I have genuinely tried to love myself but nothing works. I’ll explain some more. I genuinely feel like the ugliest person in the world, every single facial feature I have is wrong, no matter how small, I can’t even look in the mirror anymore because I’ll just break down into tears. I have cut out most of my friends, avoid my boyfriend, and avoid talking to people, because I feel like they would be embarrassed of talking to someone just as ugly as me. People have told me that I’m pretty in the past, but I know they are lying. They’re just saying it for some personal gain. I genuinely want to live an isolated life because I don’t want to burden people, they would be ashamed of me, and how ugly I am. And I have been through a lot of changes, I’ve lost a lot of weight, gained a lot of weight, but no matter what I seem to do I will never be good enough. I am not perfect, and everything about me is wrong. I’m trying to save up for a lot of plastic surgery, and trying to workout again, but avoid my friends, social gatherings and my boyfriend at all costs, they deserve prettier friends. 

I’m sorry if this came off as a mismatched mess of information, this has been on my chest for awhile and I sorta just poured it out onto this post. I really needed to say this so thanks for listening, and I am open to hear advice.",6.198022875816996,5.240648885802472,6.520101670297753,82.26251633986931,66.31481481481481,9.228467683369646,30.78721859114016,8.124751697461798,1.995215541031227,1245,38,259,13,17,403,158,324,0.21899999999999997,0.625,0.157,-0.9718,0,3,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,4,5,12,25,3,5,13,0,27,9,3,3,3,61,52,23,0,7,11,0,4,2,4,3,3,4,0,2,11,16,2,3,9,1,1,1,7,14,0,0,5,9,40,11,44,41,11,25,0,1,1,1,23,18,0,10,5,178,51,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484235711388206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625383478858128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774939787588859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110066260626936,0.0,0.0,0.10267276552256424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028517040085648,0.0,0.06410481407632322,0.0,0.08177417397102947,0.0,0.08722800311342355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814922926525547,0.1386741738637819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.299942029018395,0.0,0.0507079451389415,0.0,0.0,0.08140627460375083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19164613465129465,0.0,0.0,0.10938957780116673,0.0,0.06505483595858204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667928051099007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20566134382799625,0.09483367538926916,0.0,0.08570254892357375,0.0,0.08150290278018206,0.0,0.10594848810558244,0.3300554048418459,0.08759715922999092,0.0,0.0,0.09839992105484187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14393213049680567,0.07485585243671536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312820035670603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265128306104356,0.2018599899802585,0.1694917494954722,0.0,0.0,0.09174963682151364,0.0,0.1859063386526265,0.09874121614364133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435358606562245,0.09979010848614027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543662348634213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835647000206064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893674206790773,0.08223554355907185,0.0,0.0,0.10864665509617344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15602046037654088,0.0,0.08935646145184555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218980007136695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274151652907714,0.0,0.19768470375591465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449271807402815,0.0,0.0,0.2363770121721368,0.0,0.0,0.17515654748905599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065819004613999,0.0,0.0,0.1378921147876004,0.21223179910079595,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_milek,2020/02/18,"I’m rotting from the inside-out (Vent) Somedays, I’m not sure how to help myself. I feel inadequate. I feel like a burden to my loved ones and boyfriend, because I’m constantly under so much stress from training to go into the emergency responder field (which is like very rigid military style training).
I seem to have a difficult time dealing with this stress, whether it be blocking it out, my inability to realize it, or cutting myself off from everyone and having depressive episodes. And I feel awful...my poor family and boyfriend, having to deal with me, subjecting them to my troubles and my strife. I feel like I drain them and burden them...and I don’t want to do that at all.


But I don’t know how to be decent anymore.
I don’t feel happy anymore. Im constantly anxious and depressed and I have trouble doing simple things. I can feel myself half-assing my way through everyday. I’m not confident in myself anymore and it feels as if my intelligence has dropped significantly. I can’t think clearly or comprehend things easily. It’s hard for me to grasp certain concepts. I feel like I always have a brain fog, even when I’m perfectly hydrated and have gotten enough sleep. I feel stupid and slow. 
In addition, my emotions have been all over the place...it’s hard to know what will and what won’t set me off anymore.


I don’t know what’s happening to me, but I can feel myself rotting from the inside-out. I feel like I’m deteriorating and falling apart. I never used to be like this. The worst part is that I don’t know why it’s happening or how to fix it.
I’m not sure how to get the help I need...and for some reason I’m apprehensive about it, but I do want to get better. I just want to do the right thing. I just want to be happy and comfortable with myself again.


And sometimes I wonder if it’s from my ADHD (which for me, causes a LOT of anxiety and/or depression), my PTSD, or the several concussions I’ve had within the past year that are affecting my head. Or maybe if I had grown up differently, in a better environment that wasn’t so fucked up, maybe I could have been a better person.

But that doesn’t matter, because I can’t really fix those things.

I need help. I want to be myself again. 

I want to be happy again.


P.s. If anyone could share their mental health tips/coping mechanisms/resources (I’m from the US) I would greatly appreciate it. And for those who may ask, yes, I have made a future appointment with my therapist and will be going weekly. This is just something I’ve been feeling for weeks and I really just needed to get it out somewhere.
So...thank you. To anyone that read this. I appreciate you.",2.8331113256113234,5.010974735521239,4.245777027027028,83.8436204954955,76.74131274131273,7.482689832689832,24.69128056628057,8.408885092690799,1.713362805662806,2075,72,404,41,48,686,225,518,0.11199999999999999,0.7190000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.9859,1,0,1,0,0,1,85.0,1,2,3,4,16,36,3,4,17,1,48,6,3,9,8,102,97,40,0,15,21,0,14,6,0,5,1,0,0,1,33,26,0,2,22,1,1,4,14,16,0,1,8,14,64,20,55,75,8,38,0,3,0,2,17,16,1,14,21,277,97,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08213108830701665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05686413912870506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05227971484234301,0.07720445524252659,0.27109863870622697,0.09556947182812048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388843268650499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833185436642196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813228421421069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628975231119628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020373909726453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477019638552744,0.0,0.1091274447319544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14091054445082554,0.1765827564584825,0.0,0.0,0.07140048401552153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687301039356215,0.0,0.07061322085974554,0.0,0.04513775443019717,0.0,0.0,0.06530155120003202,0.0,0.0,0.06442462577234907,0.0,0.4146555173981394,0.1952876986187452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317898938057889,0.10711408222554178,0.0,0.07767809944721256,0.0,0.0,0.0753448057582902,0.0,0.0,0.12086521461436442,0.21824677533170944,0.12243796935938862,0.0,0.07013629032393419,0.07264194901632441,0.0,0.0,0.13742006363979725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381864748282688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15023093775023305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20032407299414695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05810000398087509,0.061679284451221526,0.06466471535889723,0.0,0.0,0.13731291072258953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887038529079166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05023757293659201,0.15201915615677894,0.05270782130229257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046308777175847485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740052798883609,0.0652380156266095,0.0,0.059671625890393015,0.07140048401552153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798855001740338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835823474557944,0.0,0.0875603761000159,0.07026463575804635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583617654470965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221393358264369,0.0,0.07720445524252659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06838909518477408,0.0,0.0,0.05261127143110203,0.06758975133229955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15656588493338947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288187943272411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06291805181686784,0.0,0.0793477066337953,0.18160754921553268,0.04378934662133604,0.0,0.0,0.03984945257470366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220429402206225,0.0590235942152114,0.0,0.05638744347557575,0.2418512993260532,0.05424490548531316,0.10963603614707028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061665986722846476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411153398089282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04854659127263673,0.0,0.0,0.04400855262404445
mentalhealth,DrugLove4Life,2020/02/18,"Numb Emotionally For years I have been trying to regain my positive emotions. I struggle with only feeling negativity on a daily basis and its becoming harder to find happiness in things. Ive experienced alot of loss, being cheated on, treated like I dont matter. I just want some advice on how I can heal effectively and feel things other than negative emotions.",6.446153846153848,8.608729000000004,7.9969230769230775,60.883076923076935,66.69230769230771,10.123076923076924,34.53846153846154,10.355215969177356,4.4110615384615395,295,14,41,8,5,102,54,65,0.252,0.5660000000000001,0.18100000000000002,-0.5417,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,2,7,1,1,2,0,6,2,0,2,0,13,9,3,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,3,7,3,10,7,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,2,2,35,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045314877515532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23116213095443444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24530517747566374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7063235348812793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116628950837481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19130197344498107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228102237696608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022563826256698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15918671237684368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21881216944520546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781073302283984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14210509521736372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345415422500358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478625894525514
mentalhealth,depthofthedark,2020/02/18,"I've been feeling hopeless for months and today was different The weather has been overcast and bitter for months and it snowed pretty heavily a week ago. Today the snow has almost finished melting, it was almost 60°F, and the sun shined through the clouds a bit. I've been feeling really hopeless because things got worse for me mentally right as it started to get cold, but now things are starting to thaw and I feel a glimmer of hope.",5.307142857142857,6.725194476190481,5.3223809523809535,81.83928571428571,68.52380952380952,7.504761904761906,33.04761904761905,7.793537801064563,2.4441333333333333,352,16,62,4,6,110,57,84,0.094,0.8059999999999999,0.1,0.128,2,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,7,0,8,0,0,0,0,12,16,7,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,6,6,2,1,8,10,1,11,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,10,37,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17240604241906818,0.0,0.3895126867609871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185609439386853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123356538616612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20320347452723408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950240570108495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161440770389504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15555357843213893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193175134483913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19600289516351055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3104844331385614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19786899601051036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12459700308590868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16609570203775406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27532586643957163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584246137109492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687126739508752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15601031131410167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19820467599675626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imuselessandshouldie,2020/02/18,"Moving Forward With my Mental Health Issues First, ignore my username, it was made a year or so ago when I was falling apart. 

I'm a 19 year old male who's past few years and present have been plagued with mental health issues. My mental health problems began to creep in lightly around the start of grade 9, and gradually got worse with each year with them drastically starting to get worse towards the end of high school. They got so bad to the point where around this time last year (2019 Jan-Feb) I would begin to physically beat myself and would leave noticeable bruises. *This was triggered by me not knowing what I wanted to become in the future, by not knowing what I liked or why I actually never enjoyed anything. Those two things were enough for my self hatred to take over myself in massive amounts. During these moments, I always got so fed up with myself for being born as me, and would ask myself ""why me? why couldn't I just be someone else?"" The inferiority  I sensed in myself when compared to others was just more fuel to the fire. This lead the self hatred to boil over and get me so frustrated and upset with myself that I would end up beating myself and leaving bruises out of shear self hatred.* 

​

I have friends that I would talk to  (and still do) when things would go south, they would help, but after a while the negative mental state would creep right back in. 

For the rest of 2019, I was a mess. my mental state was polluted and the urge to self harm was frequent but nothing rampant. So much despair to the point that I thought suicide may actually be on the timeline of my short lived existence.  I was constantly stressed out, frustrated and angry at myself for being what I was. Mid-2019, I decided, I needed a job for the time being rather than just sitting around in despair. I applied to a job I had my eye on and got called to the interview, I felt happy, having a job meant my own money, a new computer I could build and more. Long story short I got the job, and was pumped for my first day but also nervous. Seems normal. As the days went on, I realized I really liked working, the people were great, the pace was nice you name it. But I also discovered something else unfortunate regarding my mental health. I would be working, and out of the blue, a thought would pop into my mind, a thought that would cause my mental state to become a wasteland. ""But what are you going to do in the future?"" This caused a feeling that I hate, the feeling of everything going well and being fairly happy and then all of that just gets taken away in seconds - replaced by despair, stress and self hatred. It doesn't help that I never really have been all that good in school anyways despite me always trying my best no matter how much I hated the course, the outcome would be the same even back then too - which would only further my sense of inferiority. This seem out of order right? How I went from me working right to my performance in high school? Yep, that's about the best I can put anybody reading this, into my shoes in those moments. It changes in a snap,  just like  my mental state. 

But I discovered something else too and I guess it always was discovered by me but now solidified. If I made a mistake, that regardless of the size, I would find it incredibly difficult to forgive myself for it. If I was doing well at something and made a mistake, it destroys my confidence for future rounds of that same task making me question myself. Further enforcing the sense of inferiority I have in myself furthering my self hatred as well. 

Coming close to the end of 2019, the bad mental state from earlier that year was creeping back for the same reason. And come 2020, it 100% returned. The feelings of inferiority, confusion and being lost about what to become, polluting my mental state into become a wasteland had returned. This time I didn't beat myself but more so just lived in stress for the next few weeks. I had trouble sleeping, I was a mess at work and couldn't focus on anything, hell I found a game that I really wanted to play because I found it interesting and I couldn't even properly enjoy that because my mind would always be a mess from that one question on what to become. 

One late night, I decided, enough is enough.  I was tired of being pushed around by my mental health problems, tired that I could NEVER focus on anything or enjoy things I genuinely wanted to do. I got out a sheet of paper, and began listing down my mental health problems and things that I think need work. I IMMEDIATELY, felt better.  Like a weight was taken off. 

That list of problems: 

Overthinking (in progress)

Beating up myself over every mistake no matter how small (in progress) 

Severe self comparison to my peers around me frequently

Very harsh self critic that needs to be tamed

Letting other peoples opinions guide my life, decisions and enjoyment in things I may like 

Caring too much about what other people think

Can rarely accept compliments

Can't find peace with myself 

Resentfulness

Self Hatred

(Will add to this list the more problems I discover)

Fairly long list, but one that I have begun progress on. Problem by problem, before I proceed with my life, I want find a fix to them and understand why I feel like that and possibly avoid a lethal end. In fact, I feel like the problem with over thinking has already got a bit better since beginning to address it, I can recognize when I'm over thinking and cancel out the thought with persistence and actually pretty quickly too - but I feel like it needs some work still as it could be better. Due to this my performance at work has also increased to the point of people complimenting me frequently on how efficiently I work since I can put my full attention into a given task. Another thing I discovered at work a few weeks ago, was that I still can excel at something I don't like doing and that the satisfaction of doing it correctly would be enough to make up the deficit for me not liking the task beforehand, which set some tones for me and made me feel a bit more confident. 

My urge to self harm reduced from mid 2019 to now. I am able to control my actions towards myself and actually have not beat myself in months. 

Today I boiled over once more, but not in the bad way, I gained enough confidence to tell myself I was gonna fuck up each one of those problems sooner or later. That I was coming for them. That they have no control or right to possess me in the way they do in almost a daily basis. No longer are they going to keep me from doing things I want to achieve, enjoy or affect a positive mental state. 

​

I was just wondering if anybody on reddit could give me some tips or have experienced any of those issues and how they overcame it? Thanks!",7.326635685890168,7.21166201485536,7.138073098481432,75.97118897906597,63.72243940578577,9.551216289134336,32.634882005087604,9.000563874381667,2.708417009327269,5363,187,962,75,71,1702,449,1279,0.196,0.6920000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.9990000000000001,4,1,4,1,0,1,140.0,0,2,9,34,55,84,8,7,70,1,101,18,3,19,7,230,185,80,2,50,34,0,12,10,1,20,10,0,1,11,74,66,4,5,39,3,1,18,20,46,3,8,58,16,146,38,171,85,36,194,1,8,3,1,37,90,2,24,86,719,220,24,0.02862341312022335,0.0,0.11172928891342436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05074585738631196,0.0,0.02866221359644485,0.0,0.031586648144422934,0.06867039939266488,0.09526789075937256,0.06202691231405263,0.06956115985952356,0.01946490246041114,0.030014144377919532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066389037526108,0.12740453096491913,0.0267590273906609,0.0,0.026892638851592,0.06602891361480714,0.0716980630638652,0.03489713393034551,0.15806155481964734,0.024356416351317856,0.0,0.0600770122908396,0.07594524854352865,0.062498707456563135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029227705085188637,0.0,0.029183477326551594,0.058808259912981775,0.030279775752059226,0.0739696077385976,0.0,0.030931740929156824,0.0642071834250995,0.09141386507269936,0.0,0.0,0.03691946701331573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173356635739019,0.0,0.10140739258158084,0.14787818636908293,0.0,0.03781098882413815,0.0,0.0241164600714732,0.0,0.025724878064124282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131000397643776,0.06134571615694779,0.05496593069200696,0.0,0.07848384310509976,0.04869412115556922,0.0,0.06276819016092619,0.02211437797323835,0.026461884198112254,0.04486365590252165,0.027458186058582343,0.06506938121214854,0.024007960896606097,0.1602493078955549,0.031557414014571385,0.031531916584055075,0.0,0.0,0.06094031103336399,0.0,0.056519389065397586,0.0,0.18255209793394173,0.0,0.0,0.03837134091766434,0.06048441499189323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962622010395424,0.1136172834268902,0.025441804747644847,0.0,0.0,0.031461358567904746,0.02333190200904044,0.03228845674773121,0.0606161231994565,0.0,0.029269379210999823,0.040435126363412593,0.1398395382609799,0.0,0.05054999638079071,0.05066163977023081,0.0,0.0,0.031245836661541095,0.0,0.0,0.10833666231812401,0.03821270104438912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3749936856454169,0.0,0.057802975267122775,0.0,0.022846935269272138,0.030422158280028713,0.06312450628646643,0.0848955925707796,0.06622842232728733,0.02764467075528841,0.03044132457889947,0.02686113421014824,0.028044867531774133,0.027464936866575147,0.03258794555207907,0.030035457093325668,0.030483000805891405,0.07758386204006935,0.021769395498323716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02732428662995749,0.0793754825349716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117513191006111,0.03226859754620166,0.0,0.02912030144603431,0.0,0.24649866611706786,0.0,0.057548872051153714,0.06412954694096074,0.0,0.028631159022321193,0.0,0.055010674167590166,0.02942963591031287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977769536359941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869052666262819,0.0,0.052115360568873975,0.29860462418836914,0.03233630949522732,0.0,0.04735516623847689,0.0,0.02864408460685932,0.0,0.02425252505027883,0.08814280733355517,0.0,0.0,0.0405195982607858,0.0,0.06857608407654123,0.0,0.09836406906239337,0.0,0.0,0.031309368185584045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02152124443869287,0.023006415230416945,0.025018124695077824,0.026352593124267028,0.0,0.0,0.13311286666549454,0.07336290945869353,0.0,0.0908951710047431,0.05007162712137922,0.06579680541505396,0.02713164879012304,0.0,0.0,0.01943341861844838,0.0,0.027960915473862542,0.02979798251703339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02361731351050956,0.08441415332684822,0.04543986604923906,0.04591995093475868,0.03485560598804118,0.07720765778641163,0.05306838145630382,0.1033127130155648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03104087053582555,0.18754367089254784,0.0,0.058339406672205676,0.3253320229562252,0.0,0.06956115985952356,0.11059523756376896
mentalhealth,Bahgawdintensifies,2020/02/18,"Hit by a car, struggling with coping. I was a pedestrian in a crosswalk and I was hit by a vehicle from behind going 50km/hr. I flipped over the vehicle, hit the roof and landed 2 meters away on the ground. 

This happened this valentine's day.
I'm struggling with continously relaying the incident in my head and realizing I almost died. I have been repeatedly telling people i love them, I was never an emotionally open person. I've been struggling with disassociating as well. Ive not accepted fully what's happened and I am all over the place mentally but not crying or saddened. Just scared. 

I want to talk to a professional once I am able to move off bedrest. Until then how can I cope?",3.695,6.008822439393942,5.327272727272729,76.46090909090911,74.60606060606061,8.33939393939394,29.181818181818183,9.075114841892004,2.7755636363636356,550,24,99,13,12,186,88,132,0.106,0.792,0.102,0.1241,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,0,3,7,0,4,11,0,10,2,1,1,2,20,19,10,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,4,1,0,5,0,14,3,19,11,1,20,0,0,0,1,5,12,0,2,5,70,17,1,0.17737994553010122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776203929683506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666542978162784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948435410442476,0.11439539059014935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18409237877848603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199528564033404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080911076720538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31371300005200475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18204299822940825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16009232621636402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17875726488590513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885268104105645,0.0,0.0,0.13680634911959216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889038529343931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12297292001256015,0.1548813265734382,0.18532428968204054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758826965732016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5563080971497951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257128118417786,0.1550378907308856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10462328762957196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15948587350663615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imsophreshie,2020/02/18,"Advice for a move I am moving to a different state by myself for the first time ever at the end of the month. I have some close family near where I live now but just a cousin who I haven’t spent much time with in the new city which is some 700 miles away. I have no friends in the new city save some internet folks I follow but I have a secure job set up and a plan for school. 

I am a natural born procrastinator and am unsurprisingly prone to severe anxiety in times of change like this. Right now I can feel myself shutting down and am so so worried about getting this apartment rid of things I’m not taking with me and generally getting it clean. I know I have enough time in theory but in reality I feel like every little thing is taking too long and that I’m gonna fuck this up somehow. I don’t know what the point of this post is just wanted to see if anyone else has gone through something similar rn.

I am very much starting on my life and getting things done finally but I’m mostly alone and I’m so so scared",4.048315363881399,4.599846877358491,5.121374663072778,85.31594339622643,70.79245283018868,8.321293800539085,25.04851752021564,8.418075326091056,1.3222159029649592,806,21,176,12,14,266,126,212,0.115,0.773,0.11199999999999999,-0.1544,2,1,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,13,7,1,1,12,0,17,2,0,0,1,31,38,16,0,2,8,1,2,2,1,1,1,0,1,0,12,10,0,1,4,0,1,4,4,2,0,1,3,3,18,5,27,34,7,43,0,0,1,1,3,20,1,6,18,120,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701309733706484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346181147224256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943289255604948,0.0,0.0,0.09088371132647534,0.13317792599123549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221187058048022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749959783817214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579945255965942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301272616942172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858002611383513,0.0,0.11512201916519114,0.13430212509684378,0.0,0.0,0.11757263499076015,0.1095121571659061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253178717029492,0.0,0.13144166793806,0.0928563823121152,0.0,0.14238465787935675,0.0,0.11055930748626278,0.0,0.0,0.10042075947523543,0.12016266121235313,0.20372458153780584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289832106633138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286513169554246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918073776211305,0.12700147075199394,0.13027220505884315,0.1147730457119897,0.11502653043517595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10374728125739276,0.27629230567129903,0.191097721444916,0.0,0.0,0.2510673224495287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287131938589868,0.0,0.12448309281532625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100058924541814,0.0,0.0,0.13013075534705976,0.13154477880966745,0.10357571927632007,0.0,0.0,0.1468382588950333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006349336873074,0.0,0.0,0.0919991698591667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954547140327501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590550271214846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031651070191889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724554687272582,0.07666445240105246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13199907225553018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Matik080,2020/02/19,"How to focus Please someone help. I can´t focus on studying and it takes so long. I haven´t slept for 42 hours and I can´t focus. So it seems the number will just grow. I´m either crying or hurting myself.

I´m sorry for my bad English and this mess, but I feel like I´m losing my grip on sanity. I would rather just die than continue living like this.

If you read this I´m sorry for wasting your time and have a nice day.",1.2174999999999976,3.706317178571432,2.295523809523811,93.56614285714286,85.54761904761905,4.312380952380953,16.733333333333334,5.6839178017228535,-0.4982580952380951,329,7,66,2,10,104,60,84,0.228,0.625,0.147,-0.7985,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,2,0,1,6,7,0,0,2,0,3,1,1,1,0,15,7,10,1,3,7,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,2,10,3,7,4,1,8,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,3,7,41,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18364422347140846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415983805820853,0.14184581620983208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282673592977137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121039825161834,0.15712818346159635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742396388248966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21660073679806216,0.0,0.2354548196415588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21490725676923367,0.0,0.19421476191547415,0.194643699518876,0.0,0.24606130500474785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24143268825920666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200037242731534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20022894302064093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18635801051328574,0.0,0.0,0.4924190591164993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16537066920043478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282512342413604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15624205219016904,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MondaySloth,2020/02/19,"Seeking mental health advice. I live in the US and was wondering if anyone knew how much it would cost to see a psychiatrist. 
At my job you aren't able to get medical benefits until after a year of employment and that's if you qualify or catch the enrollment on time. I've been suffering from anxiety and depression for quite a while now and really need to try seeing someone or getting medication to help me out. I at first didn't want to because I didn't want to be someone that has to rely on medication just to feel normal. I'm just so tired of feeling so anxious all the time. 
I would really appreciate any advice I can get.
Thank you.",5.373203125,5.8234586640625,7.0593749999999975,72.948125,67.828125,11.0875,31.625,10.9516,3.616293750000001,511,20,97,15,8,178,87,128,0.131,0.774,0.095,-0.5782,2,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,3,0,2,6,4,0,0,6,0,10,5,0,1,1,23,24,13,0,8,6,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,4,0,1,1,3,2,0,1,5,4,11,2,20,16,2,15,0,2,2,0,5,6,0,5,8,68,14,3,0.1456889856704023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28473118131232256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907350614406704,0.0,0.1114516752695682,0.16458708508648695,0.0,0.10186912621838687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881065342840125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254817098777556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732945723836138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239229767859914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283494457649548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548605790435309,0.0,0.0,0.09765225610285468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445738380986017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864604349291595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4402989774128243,0.14682023114063633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709816765728494,0.10802653685616888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274427325643446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495816947218885,0.0,0.0,0.18666418960029035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321905183254988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468836095598075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413084407277434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699048382883982,0.16744805731255238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891325799401952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752459115498187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17186227683972827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579934902835031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20698655079809825,0.0,0.0,0.09381893017071563
mentalhealth,crossroads2268,2020/02/19,"[Academic] Roles of stress, gender discrimination/sexual harassment & identity in medical student's mental health and wellbeing (Adults 18-65yo currently enrolled in U.S. medical school) If you are a full-time medical student in the U.S., please consider participating in my doctoral dissertation research study. We are examining how different sources of stress impact medical student’s psychological health and wellbeing, including stress related to gender discrimination/sexual harassment, identity status, and medical school itself. Your input will contribute to national conversations on identifying areas of intervention for mental health providers, medical education officials, and stress management programs. Study details:

• Survey link: [https://kusurvey.ca1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_b41JIBfNhWy6Mnz](https://kusurvey.ca1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_b41JIBfNhWy6Mnz)

• Eligibility: Between 18 to 65 years old; residing in the U.S.; full-time graduate medical student enrolled at an accredited U.S. M.D./D.O. medical school (dual program enrollees are also eligible) 

• All responses are anonymous and will be kept confidential. You are not asked to identify the name of  your respective medical school. No other identifying information will be collected.  All collected data  will be kept in a password protected file and kept in the researcher's university office that is always locked unless occupied.  

• There are no expected risks to this study though it is possible difficult emotions could arise from answering the survey questions. A list of mental health resources will be provided at the end of the survey for your convenience.

 • The survey will take approximately 20 minutes to complete. 

Thank you for your participation! If you have any questions about this study, please contact me at [mreder@ku.edu](mailto:mreder@ku.edu). 

This study has been approved by the University of Kansas Institutional Review Board (IRB ID: STUDY00144783) and is supervised by doctoral advisor, Dr. Barbara Kerr

​

\*Thank you to the Mental Health forum at [www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth](http://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth), moderated by the South Asian Mental Health Alliance (SAMHAA))\*",13.053540983606553,17.207340714754103,10.485377049180327,41.617245901639336,53.32786885245902,14.322622950819671,45.970491803278684,12.823951912226406,8.182905573770492,1838,103,180,72,25,551,178,305,0.087,0.863,0.05,-0.8977,2,0,0,0,0,0,115.0,1,9,0,1,5,11,2,5,15,0,23,18,0,1,2,27,30,13,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,6,18,0,0,1,7,8,0,4,6,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,4,0,12,3,36,15,2,19,0,0,0,0,19,15,0,4,4,111,19,19,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053601964786404235,0.055772350651688056,0.1452488000247035,0.08144589679690788,0.045581081170988455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626617781430514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027718600592235,0.0,0.0,0.053516101769673176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07002959848210752,0.0,0.13721122184602738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539705264185265,0.05936657789578385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42748336452159547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6077094939924763,0.3377403875983344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033421362182883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14715240102512134,0.0,0.0755635722818983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15017255239371516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713421260195914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30711965637369143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05039642976150952,0.0,0.0,0.12342005707002927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585429791559899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144589679690788,0.043163590730989534
mentalhealth,ram_ranch_randy,2020/02/19,"Stressed So for about 2-3 years I've had anxiety feelings and at this point it feels kind of normal to be stressed all the time and just want to fix it. Just have enough money from art work to get by month by month. I feel like the stress is hindering my ability to do more work. Seems like a circle that just keeps repeating. I don't have much time to hangout, I've been trying to get my sleep schedule back on track on and off for about a year. Not sure what to do, about to say fuck it and hit the road and just be a bum or something",3.904111801242237,3.7702112869565236,4.2588819875776425,93.78956521739131,70.91304347826087,7.962732919254659,25.12422360248447,7.447530270364453,0.7439440993788811,418,10,103,4,7,131,75,115,0.124,0.804,0.07200000000000001,-0.7321,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,9,8,1,3,6,0,10,2,1,0,2,20,20,7,0,2,6,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,1,4,2,1,0,2,4,0,0,2,4,4,4,21,15,4,15,0,0,0,1,1,6,1,2,11,64,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266678427002399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732039318746785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17108785653083122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511658681142692,0.11829000772349305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15307555354792438,0.17301687992804948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717464243463713,0.0,0.1724255398025604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617875323384018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643279093079034,0.0,0.1217199635760078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16223272649310405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15652612084648693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316754418322854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15073733237785014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16569905129360996,0.0,0.0,0.12747116685680435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5690121764657363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560566925994565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931014430987288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241759241617956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976630624716321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410876549946803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21325550217931766
mentalhealth,Boroflow,2020/02/19,"Is NAMI a joke I'm not in on? I've been leaving voicemails at my local (Albuquerque, NM) NAMI office, asking if they can help me find a paychiatrist, with no response. I am disabled and mentally ill and need a psychiatrist. That's all. 

Is NAMI a joke? Should I stop leaving them voicemails? I don't understand. What do they do, if they don't actually help people?",1.3544444444444466,3.968099718309862,3.940187793427232,80.86439749608766,87.02816901408451,6.535837245696403,24.790297339593113,7.793537801064563,1.8764165884194048,284,12,52,6,9,99,49,71,0.10300000000000001,0.743,0.154,0.5514,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,0,1,12,14,4,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,9,2,4,12,1,5,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,1,36,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.2730569388117022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615872051431071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557438388551498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.375105256319903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5925627274439011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819854995308492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207477652918252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939869705471376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23393603812103825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912950030558422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DecayingInRed,2020/02/19,"Just lost my therapist.... Probably will delete this later. I've never posted here before. Apologies in advance.

She called me today to say that she won't be working with me anymore because she's being moved somewhere else (staff shortages). 

I am absolutely devastated. Been crying non-stop all day. Self harmed very badly. Just feel at a complete lost.

It took me years to finally find someone I could connect with and open up to. (I had a very traumatising experience with my first therapist when I was 13). She was amazing and really helped a lot. I was doing DBT with her and she was helping me move out of my current living situation because it's so toxic.

My favourite thing about her was that she was no bullshit; she never humoured me, she always listened and gave me a lot of really good coping mechanisms. Plus there was always some banter in our sessions which really helped bring up my mood.

My current situation is.... extremely difficult and complicated. I don't know whether to say any of it. Needless to say that what I have discovered through therapy and talking to other doctors is that I suffered through extreme psychological and emotional abuse (as well as borderline sexual and physical abuse?) and to top it off I had to take care of my mother since I was 11 (24 now)

I have no life. No real life friends. I'm not allowed go outside. Not allowed have any joy at home. I'm struggling with everything at life. And the only relief I got was going to my therapy sessions once a week -- I was able to gasp for air and be allowed to process with whatever new bullshit came up.

But right now I feel like I'm drowning and that everything I've been working so hard towards is just slipping away. I feel like I've gone back to square one.

Don't blame her for one second - I completely understand that it's just the state of the health services; there's under-staffing everywhere. And it's not like I'm left out to fend for myself - I've been assigned to another girl working where I go to. She's an absolute sweetheart.... but I can't really talk to her? I feel like she doesn't really listen and it's all the same responses I get. 

I get on well with her. But I don't think she's the right fit for me? Because there's a lot of shit to go through, and it's just very surface level with her. 

I just.... I don't know. The one solid support I had is gone and I feel totally lost. *I was doing so well.* And now? I feel so trapped.

I'm really sorry about this. I don't want to come across as whiny or needy. I'm just a stupid cunt who needs to get over it - life happens. Other people deserve more help.

Feel so lost.

I'm so sorry.",2.07134854624298,4.448829485604609,3.6418756664534015,86.13656341081969,80.43953934740885,6.7767256700078216,25.770988839127035,7.921354282810032,1.6924122129807353,2066,84,406,38,54,683,240,521,0.134,0.7809999999999999,0.085,-0.9777,5,1,0,0,2,0,80.0,1,0,0,10,28,29,3,1,14,0,40,7,1,3,5,75,85,33,1,3,15,1,8,4,2,2,6,5,1,2,23,31,0,0,12,0,0,13,16,12,3,5,27,14,63,16,62,52,9,58,0,5,1,0,38,26,2,5,21,272,86,9,0.06835624280376082,0.1619819400538306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137557398343384,0.0,0.0,0.0929691782840049,0.07167748067034821,0.0,0.0,0.06779102499096239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422294026404808,0.05256173133703358,0.0570746074989709,0.12500799346039576,0.0,0.05816612795082288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979936658875567,0.0781813314566373,0.06969374524320332,0.0,0.0,0.05888285050005791,0.1433404400956004,0.0,0.0,0.05457689768070285,0.0,0.07508612295804848,0.04408412163755186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996551101166452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710286958104493,0.07689157265548134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12286836679208007,0.06686552199669782,0.0,0.0,0.2419407916580885,0.14650114055168956,0.0,0.07488092276476828,0.06247636754488495,0.05814378520907613,0.0,0.0,0.05281186362519388,0.0,0.1071399466952604,0.0,0.1553937122224434,0.057333973323821286,0.05467073183178642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060447199761407076,0.0,0.06123376701776372,0.0,0.0,0.07265948961837781,0.0,0.0,0.1832709946544124,0.0,0.0685668849595386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513360674951879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426925781395323,0.0,0.1931281433062455,0.13358162970690135,0.0,0.060359814740143715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984756553625549,0.1743420995681473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453037364390916,0.0,0.05068528790018108,0.10544109695791913,0.06601888525458195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279716767957861,0.13895987759189046,0.05198800290253093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047389611906491054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546638519525047,0.0,0.07369959113295009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780436939673394,0.2627445570103293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675171572449294,0.0,0.16307888368872134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131046918693475,0.0,0.07016670093245649,0.056544990421193424,0.15367056185145908,0.0,0.0,0.057918022703234324,0.0,0.0,0.15303843482156865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05714887977388276,0.0,0.07146078670999176,0.0,0.0,0.0775698542755819,0.0,0.0,0.05139538754904774,0.10988431735441133,0.0,0.0,0.15634264190346436,0.15873373290424025,0.04541285034174842,0.043799920284538434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06479372549228476,0.0,0.07594630090733284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07116125947109485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16920317747393102,0.04031828305484002,0.0,0.0548312547921723,0.0,0.1843814146059618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14929247664018128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04401917921816779
mentalhealth,PotterJoeMez,2020/02/19,"I need help and advice (Desperate) So I obviously suffer from Mental Health issues or I wouldn't be in this subreddit. But I really need help because I don't know what to do anymore. I'm extremely lost, confused, anxious, depressed and everything in between. All I want to do is find distractions that can help me. I've honestly tried everything and it's harder to find something that will keep my attention completely. Video Games don't help like they used to, Movies can't keep my attention like they used to, Reading Comics don't last anymore because they don't last long, and I can't read Books without losing my attention immediately. I have so much I'm trying now. I even do some humiliating shit on Twitter as I roleplay because it's distracting me. But not in the good way and only lasts for a bit. Music doesn't calm me down as much and I'm lost still. What I've started to do is drink a lot of beers to get me tipsy or drunk. It helps block out my Psychosis that I have and my laughter that was caused by trauma when I was younger. I go through so much pain and sadness it's hard to do anything. I just wanna find something to make me happy and distract me from the voices and hallucinations I constantly see and hear. I tried getting into the X-Men Evolution TV show since I thought I could get into the X-Men, but I couldn't and was looking at my phone and waiting until the episode would end. I feel so lost typing this and upset. I just wanna be happy again. My psychiatrist appointments keep getting delayed, my doctor pushes my appointments back and makes me wait longer, my counselor takes forever to see me again. Nothing is good right now and I can't figure out a way to do anything. Please help me.",4.3929585798816575,5.808527857988168,5.21830295857988,81.73054319526628,70.71597633136095,8.129893491124259,29.79218934911243,8.608573733854374,2.2780292071005923,1368,55,262,23,25,445,171,338,0.14800000000000002,0.762,0.08900000000000001,-0.8944,0,0,4,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,3,4,15,23,1,5,8,0,30,7,1,5,2,65,62,29,0,9,9,0,2,2,0,3,3,2,0,0,12,20,3,7,10,11,0,2,12,15,0,0,7,7,44,8,34,48,7,31,0,7,3,0,12,11,1,5,18,170,56,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465986942773329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978742199480362,0.17183961540169607,0.0,0.0,0.14258838350107153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661787234377456,0.0,0.1584378280254351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458426665811187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899921876264184,0.0,0.0,0.09083638321157413,0.0936229292190193,0.0,0.06917193764602315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461961225923341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867579819917458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487047067558989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673393779948362,0.0,0.0,0.057222377791328424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572601902243216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04380585419261452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375516885614129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18105530672362827,0.0,0.04923733589311125,0.14533262960296014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18445164271641865,0.07760899746929907,0.0,0.0,0.0920902048093396,0.09764526795007428,0.0,0.3484224191908044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042565995211707,0.0,0.23101864429954594,0.0,0.0,0.047612977120868184,0.21186014217632645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465211979250173,0.0,0.0,0.07667029032072438,0.07275256876066716,0.09692372133309557,0.2837208640327483,0.07365497950529741,0.0,0.0,0.1156606417123483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730888932098818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910626756372644,0.12847925489329154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312974837573398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589071654739077,0.09218700058121752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510050593726617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17331924386309233,0.0,0.05550135340133299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398682174469141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380756324136651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889307906455655,0.07166634084796514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333935233560751,0.0,0.0,0.06132153196034245,0.0,0.0691877628261099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513962306239576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877944714474636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764608316064957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965168070148235,0.0,0.0,0.051100261832035115,0.1375355293642566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351418296221869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154385439311035,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Justenoughonmyown,2020/02/19,10 years of mental illness Just wanted to share. Does it get better? Yes. And then gets worse again and keeps going. I don't know what I am like without it. I don't remember the last time I really had an interest in anything or had a hobby. Well I'm still alive so I guess that counts for something.,0.2214516129032269,2.573178161290325,2.087338709677418,93.90100806451612,89.96774193548387,5.035483870967743,17.427419354838708,6.6274283507984215,-0.024845161290322004,234,6,50,3,8,77,52,62,0.085,0.6459999999999999,0.268,0.8876,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,1,5,1,0,0,0,10,13,5,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,2,0,5,5,5,11,0,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,7,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21487237957826205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309317557461221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285002877942321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728397898604816,0.0,0.14839558830355182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28764357211718883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23208775080995994,0.0,0.0,0.1434999603973968,0.2128405871009545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756580844485307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26313881041501336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727460656104384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29578824056689274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20101626149393115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20852384845264668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15225611853225746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15401022982828208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347704472840398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25170200798989245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660947564931134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814713808673767
mentalhealth,Small_Guy18,2020/02/19,Hia I'm new to this Hey so I'm new here but I really need someone to talk to and I don't know what to do.,-5.172857142857144,-4.284672571428567,-0.34171428571428564,107.4867142857143,114.0,3.6685714285714286,9.17142857142857,5.6839178017228535,-1.8208228571428573,80,1,26,1,5,31,19,28,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,6,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179663384934612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940810935889261,0.0,0.7660963083182932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540783524544195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360461420011891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187798822362262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angel-vesp,2020/02/19,"I'm afraid to get help I've been struggling to make friends, wake up to school, get a job and pretty much interact with other people. I'm 21 and it's been three years since I had a partner (the only one I've had in my life) and I feel too ugly and insecure to date... I also tend to shut down when people ask me out. When I'm in class I try to participate but my heart accelerates with the sole idea of raising my hand. I still have friends though, just a few and they know I've never had sex so I feel quite uncomfortable when they talk about their experiences and how much I'm missing. I want to get better and I know I need to, but I'm already too tired to keep on trying. I have had panick attacks, I feel people judging me and I feel miserable almost all day. I found out they offer counseling at my school but I'm too afraid to talk about it with anyone... I really don't know what to do",0.8234736842105264,2.7792906105263167,2.8426315789473726,92.49342105263159,82.3684210526316,5.894736842105264,18.94736842105263,7.0608816371341465,0.13757894736842102,696,17,159,9,19,234,103,190,0.13,0.767,0.10300000000000001,-0.7379,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,4,2,14,10,1,5,5,0,10,6,3,2,2,34,34,18,0,2,4,0,5,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,4,13,0,1,9,0,0,0,2,7,0,2,7,5,24,3,25,27,4,17,0,2,0,1,13,9,0,1,8,98,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938726457989126,0.0,0.15360908770300674,0.1113170492658602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733087940687896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13013187618088387,0.15835847318277332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310982677247985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977156456212979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361629153974999,0.0,0.0,0.2815319256750361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15262405151860195,0.21508894581385926,0.0,0.21817652897826545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649509802999718,0.09330186991278107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571382466372832,0.0,0.0,0.13813310591472228,0.1237260882805566,0.0,0.0,0.2294996875934577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832006934449423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291612898047788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046539364360904,0.1032139787765526,0.10735852152032672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432455616974993,0.10586678798756537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289508293245474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416149924585042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805481764587927,0.0,0.0,0.0891741708308154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817527765109777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115146498777855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116416093574544,0.0,0.0,0.14552057270280375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237650819233812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676189211815515,0.0,0.0,0.1599882837736809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18901338890290276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210292540361462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963931779440487
mentalhealth,Junbronie,2020/02/19,"Do I suffer from mental illness? Scared.. I have had this feeling of forgetting something for the past 2.5 months and it is driving me insane.  More specifically I have this notion in my head that some unknown expense is going to hit my bank account and complicate things for myself. 

I have made excel spreadsheets, combed through months of my financial records, and nothing jumps out as a surprise. I've compiled a list of every bill and recurring expense I have and again, nothing shows that I have ANYTHING to worry about. I've read over these lists and excel files thousands of time thinking I will get peace in numbers. Every hour minutes of my time are wasted thinking about this and my brain just seems to go in circles. NOTHING will give my brain peace of mind to shut these intrusive thoughts out. EVERYTHING on paper shows i have nothing to worry about by my brain is choosing to believe otherwise. I thought this could just be anxiety, but i can deal with my anxiety in the past. I dont know what this is........",6.7054761904761895,7.613330936507938,6.036097883597886,79.83922619047621,65.03174603174602,8.416402116402116,35.8558201058201,8.344100000000001,2.9504105820105813,813,38,141,10,12,248,111,189,0.083,0.856,0.061,-0.4566,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,6,5,0,1,4,0,19,5,4,1,0,26,32,9,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,12,10,0,0,8,3,5,4,1,2,0,1,4,1,21,3,30,23,2,22,0,1,0,0,2,9,0,2,9,100,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902710184706434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023381675056542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011179622190148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41648263331864094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929181000156563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821030531040792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574968264826196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20955831760730967,0.0,0.11176727744856294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288044978163823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497327430299056,0.11929800762491224,0.14135397581314224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762984105719746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247012839645313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834532671452402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767299503789926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532622252494735,0.0,0.1255687424043162,0.0,0.1985268693383036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4773093518611812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23743250539356675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439424148658773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450664321307015,0.0,0.0,0.11321320842636848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573885615500244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261964859458737,0.1593704863335905,0.0,0.19745683091476934,0.14503131759137688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525884269240415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,umbrellaprisma,2020/02/19,"What the hell is going on with me I’ll keep myself as short as I can. 

I’ve been going through a very rough time in my life recently, with stressfull situations happening from every direction. 

The only thing is I’m not feeling stressed about it.

A thing that has always been recurring with me is that when I’m stressed I can feel that gut wrenching anxiety kick in. 

But now I don’t feel it anymore.

Instead I feel numbed out, as if my body is subconsciously suppressing anxiety and emotions for me because it’s too much to handle. I feel like I’m observing everything around me from a window. I’m so indifferent nowadays and it’s scaring me. 

Yet I’m experiencing mood swings and major sensitivity to criticism. Sometimea I burst into sobbing.!So I’m clearly not as fine about everything that I initially thought. 

In a way it’s nice to not feel the anxiety, but I don’t know how good this really is for me. 

Any advice?",3.2009628655931657,5.56560145251397,4.865073940190602,78.936473874466,76.37430167597766,8.681038448899113,29.523825172527108,9.325443323948027,3.008366809069997,736,34,137,20,17,248,104,179,0.1,0.826,0.07400000000000001,0.0808,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,10,10,1,3,7,0,12,4,2,1,1,27,30,13,0,1,6,0,7,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,13,9,0,2,8,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,3,8,17,4,24,27,2,17,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,1,7,90,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467330530011935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494381977304447,0.0,0.0,0.10211286281361212,0.0,0.3446123006063672,0.0,0.14891678645905088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367281360606004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915351684105576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16679213432768195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16890799198217513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651493033868935,0.0,0.2699053796957315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4555476001881351,0.10727319270976177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17067696102244972,0.12594574375369985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132784579376357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334676874549358,0.0,0.0,0.0825231310022825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606132035842243,0.07335981064073976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11038370324428527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142022314561674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961953176318974,0.0,0.14826330716977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15033475619252792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878433573859455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3440118853368827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995171407347968,0.0,0.0,0.1192089986849991,0.08755857200755343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389640787718555,0.0,0.11918875056250484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nottherealkathleen,2020/02/19,"recently has been weird and I don’t like it today I was anxious all day and later in the day I kept crying over small things and getting uncontrollably upset. I’m literally never like this. I’m usually happy all day. I don’t know what caused this. I am just so tired. I don’t have the energy to go to my three dance classes today, but my mom will make me go I guess. It’s been winter for two months, but right now it’s getting so hard.  mentally I am in the right place, I’m otherwise happy, but this random sadness keeps prevailing. I don’t know if it’s a seasonal thing or I’m just lonely but please can I have some support.",0.8397402597402639,2.9769594242424238,3.1947186147186137,88.95136363636365,83.54545454545455,6.498701298701298,20.034632034632033,7.7094869923839395,0.7704722943722948,492,14,106,9,14,169,78,132,0.152,0.706,0.142,0.1852,0,2,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,10,0,2,4,0,14,1,0,2,3,23,29,11,0,1,8,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,10,3,0,2,2,1,0,3,5,5,0,2,4,1,13,5,6,24,3,23,0,2,0,0,1,7,0,5,15,67,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17962383729305678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333597548688006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17465315382705487,0.3076239886028891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661410378199496,0.0,0.18072581760352013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17515554317874493,0.0,0.0,0.3385152073479774,0.1424320514769256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14132579344303905,0.0,0.0,0.1747636029168366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535795432335167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613319983127098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602337953544564,0.0,0.0,0.18621793993451474,0.12691164352130066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12262998408490132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661203214653992,0.17453337369158392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699252698396765,0.0,0.0,0.27156889399383666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18043040654402634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126400522487576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827461892647482,0.30142529830058223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15531911371590776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511515421296908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garryc2901,2020/02/19,"300mg XR Wellbutrin experiences Hello! I recently got my dose of XR Wellbutrin changed from 150 to 300 and I just took it an hour ago and I feel terrible. I was wondering if anyone can let me know if they had experienced anything like this and if the side effects like more depression, more sedation, and brain fog from upping the dose. I’m thinking about making an appointment in 2 days to get the 150 XRs perscribed again because I felt a very positive effect from those like less social anxiety (although I did have to face side effects for 4 weeks). Please let me know how long it took for the effects of the dose upping to go away.

I’m just so upset that I finally felt like my life was in control for 2 weeks now I feel like shit again",4.7920408163265344,5.745858850340137,5.394700680272108,82.56756122448981,69.34013605442178,8.873197278911565,30.346258503401362,9.120678840339163,2.4574658503401356,589,23,117,11,10,190,90,147,0.1,0.777,0.12300000000000001,0.36200000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,5,8,9,1,1,8,0,8,7,3,7,0,24,24,10,0,3,5,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,12,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,9,5,13,5,18,13,3,21,0,1,0,0,3,7,1,4,16,70,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171581867178225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367072674681818,0.0,0.0,0.10389738496348264,0.0,0.12227667637255163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396049303341745,0.0,0.0,0.09057891228327414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587526566852606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571882182231593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16665600238192965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582807490205968,0.0,0.12798010546488875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453492552930156,0.0,0.0,0.1502628510068846,0.10615252346751083,0.28533886047246115,0.16277277189356856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763199428378326,0.0,0.08444696038514722,0.0,0.11884077056134774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14633094006115124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633220449405923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038861056533523,0.104953311390704,0.3629671506879948,0.0,0.0,0.1314972236411718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918478987172316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16310688853934066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671441947562722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252520914147588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15146850407025347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521029082171092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301772856775202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260207804485734,0.0,0.0,0.2383794162623129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113920960231554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw_away_acc_3105,2020/02/19,"Does it sound like bpd to anyone ?? I'm scared of commitment, every time I get slightly close to anyone I find a way to ruin everything. I reject people so I don't get rejected. I hurt people first so they don't get to hurt me later but by doing it I hurt myself even more.

I guess it comes from insecurity but I feel like everyone hates me and unconditionally will abandon me. If people give me compliments or just act nicely I feel like they do it because they feel pity for me.

I fucking hate people and love them at the same time. I can't accept affection but I'm so much craving for it. I'm scared that the smallest mistake will ruin everything so I don't even try, I give up before even trying so I don't have to deal with even the slightest possiblity of failing. I'm destroying myself and it's all my fault.

I also have SEVERAL other ""symptoms"" such as impulsive dangerous acts(self harm, taking large quantities of medication, shoplifting, binge eating etc) I have very unstable relationships, my whole life I've been told I'm too ""sensitive"" and that my reactions are exaggerated.

I also have something idk if it's a thing but ""depressive episodes"", I feel quite anxious and depressed everyday but sometimes everything is extremely intense and my suicidal thoughts are screaming like never before and I do even more stupid shit than I usually would, every time ""the depressive episodes"" feels like the end of the world and like it will never end.",4.823367617783674,6.823671383211678,5.933696084936964,74.7038553417386,70.56934306569343,9.215394824153949,30.337757133377572,9.688023934748609,3.1760496350364957,1165,49,201,29,22,387,146,274,0.31,0.563,0.127,-0.997,0,1,1,0,0,2,31.0,0,0,4,3,15,37,7,3,8,0,20,7,1,1,4,38,44,24,1,4,9,0,5,6,0,4,3,2,0,0,12,11,1,1,8,0,0,2,7,27,0,1,3,7,35,10,18,37,7,18,0,13,0,2,10,4,2,4,17,134,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011457339058575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989681489409035,0.0,0.12251020608042534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053402889852641376,0.0,0.14908995360028102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033480053020248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546351938991085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031639240730896,0.2263608814631209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766632879735623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896412735983266,0.0,0.0,0.1551831685400563,0.0,0.09770217427968972,0.2893097289057101,0.0,0.14762113856147913,0.08370985359504113,0.2361998264625036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22147733614224135,0.18775401609770248,0.0,0.0,0.08006892556313974,0.07451634262379354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098894825837342,0.13730920592684026,0.16807643728755786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965062329497898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17298261311788635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813472861669506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187764885428741,0.25679480064011323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906648121486151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825231690611668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439938712344485,0.0,0.1351319815057115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429357184046191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876091050334344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317816879662616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405444752287068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754147736958178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139059893485622,0.0989681489409035,0.08992475994920282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744222377590871,0.08664309016520355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582510379837286,0.0,0.0,0.09105461826875176,0.06586768119956646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05820053688318438,0.0,0.0,0.0695481871805287,0.15324866467502882,0.0,0.0,0.08370985359504113,0.0,0.11895540946287605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648397966069017,0.07228288687171014,0.0,0.06953637414435845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780729528842587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622317230339963,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NS005,2020/02/19,"I'm so scared My mom was just diagnosed with kidney cancer a few days ago. I'm really scared and breaking down mentally. I love her so much. I'm worried about how I'm gonna take care of my younger siblings. I have an older brother, but I know I'll have do a lot more babysitting. 



I just want her to be okay 😭",-0.4872058823529422,1.5572232205882344,1.9544117647058847,96.1898529411765,88.85294117647058,5.1647058823529415,20.264705882352946,6.6274283507984215,0.1847294117647058,241,8,57,3,8,82,50,68,0.134,0.728,0.138,0.0697,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,2,3,1,5,4,1,1,0,9,15,5,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,8,3,5,12,4,5,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,1,3,32,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23357467802207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686533116672628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699341200353375,0.0,0.0,0.2674444649291429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14481136148105414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22401619279014687,0.2378168249580736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655435533861956,0.0,0.0,0.3086051439091305,0.0,0.0,0.1937010164057334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16880327667150954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5276140267038626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19811736363559287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554176809643787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675945507584728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Belac_Llahsram,2020/02/19,"I want to try and figure out my problem. Hello there. I am a 25 year old male and I've had a history of maladaptive behaviors and a lifestyle I would consider not optimal. I've tried to discover what my problem has been to little avail. 

When I was very young people would often say that I had seemed depressed at times, though I dont remember it too vividly. What I do remember is that in was a weird kid, ostracized for my oddness and extremely interested, almost addicted to learning pointless things. Every week would be a different topic to me ants to hurricanes to planets. I'd absorb all knowledge I could obsessively then entirely lose interest shortly thereafter, moving onto something new. I got to the point where I read several books before school in the library every day. I dont read like that now and dont remember why I loved it so much. 

Because my social interactions were so embarrassing and I'd always end up having my words twisted by others in attempts to mock me so that they could seem funny, I eventually started to avoid all people. I know now it was my own weakness/shortcomings, my inability to be clever in conversation and stage fright. Starting around high school I developed a cold distant personality but still sought others approval. Was still a huge nerd but got a more cool/physically violent reputation after several won fights. I got my first girlfriend around this time and was more happy than ever. The feeling I had was nearly impossible to imagine now and seems like a story or dream. 

At high school went on I immersed myself in video games to a degree which I can only describe as addictive. This combined with my coldness led to me becoming a horrible person which led to my then girlfriend leaving me, which I cannot blame her for. But it shattered me. I entirely disregarded my first two years of college and ended up failing out. The entire time i had several extremely close friends. Never the same people but always the same sort of relationship where we felt we were inseparable. Every friend I've had like that no longer will contact me or respond to my messages. No explanation either.

Became severe alcoholic and moved far from home state for next 3 years. Always hoping the alcohol would kill me unexpectedly. I thought I was suicidal but the truth is I didnt want to die, I just couldn't stand living how I was. Moved back to homestate after ruining every relationship there somehow began blue collar job. Going to school now but slipping again as I just dont care. Now I have no friends, my family hates and feels betrayed by me. I don't blame any of them. I talk to noone. I've developed good social skills and can be the center of a room but relationships evade me entirely. 

Mostly I feel nothing, but with moments of extreme explosive emotions (mostly deep endless anger) where I feel murderous and like the anger has no limit. To cut things short I'm now taking meth and isolating and feel I'm fading away. I've tried therapy briefly several times in my life and also got on prozac. Like meth its usefulness faded. The only thing I seem to feel any joy from is violence, which is obviously unacceptable. I've tried to solve this but idk what to solve. I feel like I'm heading to the end and I just can't bring myself to care about it.",5.280099153067546,7.085869433656963,6.1115478895545055,74.66552881636026,69.06472491909385,9.272519451903877,31.110101218756448,9.690429555198008,3.1973856228052053,2642,111,453,62,47,868,315,618,0.195,0.688,0.11699999999999999,-0.9946,2,1,5,0,1,2,55.0,2,0,2,9,32,42,9,4,24,0,47,8,1,4,6,99,84,40,4,12,16,0,8,6,5,5,6,1,2,4,26,27,2,3,22,6,0,8,15,21,0,3,26,13,66,21,66,47,11,87,0,4,2,1,30,34,0,13,48,309,92,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461256926986045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12216046594974142,0.05723146445530158,0.0,0.0,0.045706024632376815,0.14267009294432692,0.0,0.0,0.0777333453008046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175833573813788,0.0,0.0,0.05369805438666657,0.04394788990334342,0.0,0.03484054142235187,0.06312209087390508,0.048633835344869335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11654460250786798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126561966377317,0.0,0.0,0.03685959489785082,0.0,0.04922664727681629,0.0,0.05931681749195417,0.05971375426205491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26793619942031816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429054529977242,0.15186441107842658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05169905549285035,0.1926188042279352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387969458244298,0.0,0.2022914200968461,0.04083082141007253,0.05487679271642781,0.0,0.0,0.09723030828445074,0.0,0.0,0.1324710911808444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03248192926063341,0.04793805461239075,0.1828450655913391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084148443499135,0.0,0.0564277318541245,0.05865648199730841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077265543571315,0.057330111367428965,0.056766807442388476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05671651542259575,0.0,0.06323242114547427,0.0,0.031410337839675354,0.0,0.0,0.060517822334876736,0.0,0.0,0.0403695529207192,0.16753531341532696,0.05728331221837805,0.05046801970385305,0.0,0.0,0.06394069465605323,0.0,0.0,0.051583706827238986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822369369063297,0.042014758393032495,0.0,0.04408068001680776,0.05519967906128671,0.06078391606940223,0.0,0.0,0.054840794230961436,0.0,0.05997349748480761,0.0,0.0,0.08693636871300489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887013956642135,0.09980931793295983,0.0,0.0,0.054028993735749264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937729798222373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433891205830025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840859858288128,0.19423298528055505,0.0,0.0,0.04545114632263782,0.0,0.2313715541039012,0.0,0.2081233813945683,0.0,0.32283869863444203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165225891372469,0.0,0.04399993329132265,0.0,0.0,0.08090777566087573,0.0,0.09128649944415897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251718787879877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04297268708791152,0.045938211683232776,0.0,0.0,0.06536056783892719,0.0,0.11391171273747512,0.0,0.0561535043476932,0.04537388337969958,0.13330780323595454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521522832342266,0.0,0.05583114279347021,0.0,0.0,0.049362696194947285,0.0,0.04715802686203188,0.06742180745243108,0.0,0.04584548277942163,0.0,0.0,0.052982320726853376,0.05157258565214641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624022168188365,0.0,0.0,0.11041588581876956
mentalhealth,Vegatheist,2020/02/19,"My Sister’s (16F) Mental Health Is Worse Than Ever And My Family Doesn’t Know What To Do My family is having a lot of trouble right now taking care of my little sister. For context, I’m 24 & live alone. My parents live with my 16 year old little sister in the same city. My Grandma also lives in the same city, but she has grown pretty distant because of the situation with my sister.

She’s 16 & has Bipolar disorder as well as high functioning ASD. She sees her psychiatrist once a week, and sees an occupational therapist for group therapy once a week (although she usually refuses to go to this). She’s always been difficult, but her mental health has significantly devolved over the last 6 months to a year. 

She is severely depressed and has extreme anger problems. She has increasingly frequent explosive episodes of rage where she throws anything she can get her hands on and destroys furniture/my family’s belongings and threatens to stab/kill/murder my parents. We believe (and her psychiatrist agrees) that these are dissociative episodes as she does not remember her words or actions after the fact.  

Last December she was having a conflict with her friend group & threatened to commit suicide. This wasn’t the first time and wasn’t the last, but she seemed serious and I was able to convince my family that she needed to be hospitalized, & she spent a week in the hospital. Since coming home, her mental health hasn’t improved much. The conflicts with her friends were not going away, & her friends were pretty toxic. We were able to convince her to delete her Discord account, which is how she would primarily communicate with this friend group. I think this was a good step forward, but she is even more depressed now that she has lost her only friend group. 

Since being hospitalized she has also started going to a therapist weekly, in addition the the Psychiatrist & OT. Starting this month she is now going to the therapist twice a week.

It’s reached the point where she refuses to go to school most days, & leaves early when she does attend. She has an IEP that allows her to arrive at 11am instead of the normal start time, but she still asks to leave early. When she does attend, she basically goes for one class, then lunch, then asks to leave. She is not going to graduate on time, and has failed most of her classes. There’s not an alternative school in her district, and she doesn’t want to change schools. We’re not opposed to her dropping out and pursuing a GED, but she doesn’t want to do that. 

She has worn down my parents to the point she has absolutely no structure or boundaries. She has broken laptops, iPhones, furniture, etc with no consequences. She refuses to go to school, which is causing my parents to miss work. They don’t trust her in the house alone because they’re worried about her safety. They keep all the chemicals & sharps locked up.

In addition to her school attendance, her episodes are getting worse & more frequent. This past Friday she was alone with my Mom, & completely destroyed the house. My Mom locked herself in her bedroom, & then locked the bathroom door. My sister kicked the bedroom door in, & trashed my parents bedroom (she had already trashed the rest of the house) all while threatening to kill my Mom. 

We are all hesitant to call the Police on her because of how frequently mentally ill people are killed by the Police. However, in this instance my Mom wanted to call 911. My dad was on his way home & convinced my Mom not to call the cops, which he has since admitted was a mistake. We’ve all agreed if another episode happens where my family feels unsafe, that they should call 911.

She takes a few different medications, which have been helping with her depression, but not the rage episodes. My parents are looking into services that bring mental health professionals into the home to help, but I thinks that’s too little, too late. I worry about their safety. To be clear, my sister has never followed through on any of these threats, but I worry that the worse her episodes get the more likely she is to follow through. My grandma and I think she needs to be in a residential care facility until her anger issues & mental health improves. Unfortunately, there aren’t any places like that in our state (Nebraska). Another complication to providing her care is that she is trans. Luckily everyone in my family is accepting, but it does make it harder to find mental health professionals that are not transphobic.",7.285180748663103,8.12034797939394,6.795429590017825,75.1547914438503,63.75151515151515,9.961497326203206,34.23707664884135,9.916854025145753,3.391548306595366,3613,149,623,72,51,1124,343,825,0.17300000000000001,0.7170000000000001,0.11,-0.9967,10,3,0,0,0,2,124.0,4,0,4,4,23,37,9,0,45,0,64,11,1,5,9,97,111,40,3,11,21,18,3,2,5,2,9,0,8,0,29,29,1,7,10,0,2,20,19,20,1,3,17,6,105,17,93,88,17,103,0,6,3,0,114,38,0,7,46,417,134,14,0.0721281975063296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120545898355032,0.03979762976474308,0.057680893486611776,0.030008219197348814,0.5470561030428586,0.0,0.0490496476855874,0.07563270405878067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02967768041349433,0.0,0.06743012807746572,0.0,0.03388340793613373,0.0,0.0,0.0659530195952001,0.0,0.0,0.04063188946787125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473019081397928,0.0,0.11030925667511277,0.03704776373270974,0.03815103455200481,0.031066027742313162,0.037812521394501114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02325836018734092,0.0,0.09318586623257782,0.0,0.0,0.037679307344916486,0.04133258161811553,0.0,0.12623974340226926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04022100322375042,0.023819997097849398,0.03262204203085667,0.0,0.03446079185164799,0.0,0.0,0.20398813609133526,0.0,0.01823509193452319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03296193290415587,0.030676103976088588,0.0,0.0,0.13931516617915082,0.0,0.05652600932323476,0.0,0.14347240893233826,0.030248854984578626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03189136342390847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300067032479639,0.0,0.0,0.04834601039134225,0.038103700389138254,0.10852569460890447,0.0,0.0,0.12483938370770055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037641549351291666,0.0,0.032055428017056874,0.1196987457888332,0.0,0.019819885517076846,0.08819116168491015,0.040681874235143016,0.11456002000446333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03523819396560905,0.10843710398808212,0.09553577977188843,0.0,0.030284759977289813,0.0,0.03936822398691922,0.030660407095564893,0.0,0.0,0.024073065960053812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036330785358194936,0.25440890423646245,0.0,0.0,0.2111891829378395,0.05757203910640862,0.0,0.02651126217196251,0.05348214451787135,0.02781485623960601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03533515964491084,0.0,0.0,0.03784320500705155,0.07681417633453014,0.0244379666613562,0.02742837221231154,0.0,0.0,0.24026948260227945,0.0,0.034427262997728705,0.025002305181931663,0.0,0.037679307344916486,0.0,0.06818446053724334,0.0,0.0,0.07338030741901366,0.0,0.034508471943854785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0408535936114429,0.030798543284314937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18249396654272307,0.05747683494333292,0.03283140103205827,0.0,0.040742166353488984,0.0,0.08949778549419407,0.040537558025061836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657906415516291,0.0,0.02880083585017292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03944827059587535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05423142805982476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04124243994161576,0.12561959487777868,0.0,0.0693252548296335,0.0,0.0,0.06308779800831013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03971950967911676,0.0,0.06381461949958737,0.028626002944640287,0.14464222333443172,0.0,0.03242595590323944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026255093413647096,0.1098745286305542,0.110257193014883,0.025618901024705598,0.0,0.0,0.04644819437822938
mentalhealth,spontaneousbluerry,2020/02/19,"Mental health and writing papers I am doing my second year as a postgraduate.
During my BA I didn't have papers to write.
It's going to be two years and I have never submitted papers on time. I have issues of panic and avoid work, teachers etc. when it's becoming overwhelming. In my mind I'm often confused and I have issues planning and following the steps of writing a research paper. I often go back to the first step and read the same things. With readings I don't manage to read as many as I should, like my brain doesn't want to read, I panic or it feels I don't understand anything. Then time flies I still haven't done much and I panic like hell, cry by myself cause that's the only thing I can do when I go mad about myself. Then idk but it's like being so miserable and telling yourself  that nothing of what you're doing makes sense and in a very bad panic mode I wrap up and send my work barely rereading it cause I'm like I can't read this mess. I wanted to stop so many times cause I feel on the edge....  I'm soon finished with studies but I still feel miserable and picking myself up last minute. Can someone relate? How do you handle this ?",2.08092059838895,4.0789595105485255,3.448494438051401,89.52599827387805,78.36708860759494,5.659301879555045,20.89930955120829,6.574015621080383,0.3402506329113928,912,24,185,8,22,298,128,237,0.191,0.767,0.042,-0.9862,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,4,12,17,2,9,8,0,21,2,1,6,1,40,35,24,0,3,3,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,12,13,0,2,4,5,0,7,7,13,0,3,2,3,28,4,22,30,3,31,1,3,0,0,6,6,1,4,22,125,40,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953882170743264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432172159859254,0.08070287985165246,0.0,0.10674784329735316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078989352105384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978739005008511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617096858211507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891161325808344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077958640882636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661500218250134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221468561011068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479377568320855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273973519415028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20176539681871966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878671769147555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888829846586044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451795674965755,0.19598597969253312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974054970070386,0.0,0.09759398724402238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105253934117853,0.0,0.07454628732553979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274307025987924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351047577586868,0.0,0.4536152238525047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4834057339597352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189545986012567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15437760066115724,0.08080790004786892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448072200703939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842656184424148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16908090685604496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944178812760674,0.10062125391386324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975048975701203,0.11401923537567345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073196859351067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448528994881675
mentalhealth,imnotcreative123123,2020/02/19,"is it normal to ask yourself if you would care if you died? i’ve felt flat for the past 3 or 4 years (on and off) but the periods of ‘numbness’ last for a while but i guess i don’t really notice them cause i feel fine - but that’s all i feel.

i’ll go to concerts and go out with friends and all that but i never really feel happy - i smile and have a good time but i always just feel
flat.

i guess i’ve been suicidal at points in my life but right now, i don’t think i am (?) but i just keep asking myself if it would be all that bad if i died. like would i really mind? would i really miss out on anything? and i don’t think that’s normal but i’m also definitely not suicidal so i just wanna know if anyone else experienced the same sort of thing?",0.17999999999999972,1.8921105975609755,2.72579268292683,93.77637195121952,83.26829268292683,6.295121951219512,16.347560975609756,7.413659706084162,-0.09991951219512174,574,10,140,9,16,199,91,164,0.18100000000000002,0.69,0.129,-0.9233,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,0,6,9,0,0,5,0,12,2,0,1,4,52,30,22,4,12,18,0,5,1,1,4,2,1,0,0,7,8,0,1,8,1,0,2,5,3,0,0,2,7,21,6,15,23,4,19,0,1,0,0,6,9,0,9,9,92,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117282939426474,0.1052693971179124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846120627494901,0.1296280687752749,0.10410986084981146,0.0,0.2365461570250581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563351846522834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289889821001674,0.12996425169587453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626021538558008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10568582584498012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558761813505491,0.0,0.12147283496781468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774404443404412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380111654491734,0.1061135519836205,0.0,0.0,0.2787378473328252,0.0,0.0,0.13467601206504434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11245104414627656,0.0,0.0,0.06952853102036312,0.1031254177468712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936025224730364,0.06180812346591121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12774260686343533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975750386255316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479128087156591,0.0,0.14403649977907046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077148585048003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959618473794405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32419124406697913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804186887358523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767705498058315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404997205141057,0.16212953153416754,0.0,0.0,0.07377106050129745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35948634578522315,0.0,0.0,0.08147056956721715
mentalhealth,baerrow,2020/02/19,"How to enjoy things again? My current mental health could be resumed per the following words: meh, bleh, blob, gray.

I feel empty. I don't feel like having any hobbies, like before (playing, reading, learning new things).

The days are just the same, waking up, working, coming home to eat, and going to sleep after passing to much time on the net without doing really anything that feels ""good"".

I just want to go to bed, and stay there. I had medications that didn't really helped (I mean, still feeling like shit, but with less energy than what I currently have).

​

I want to enjoy things again, like reading, loving, learning new things, playing. I am not even sure that there is a game I want to play (I feel like having no patience).

​

Well, that's kinda all. Sorry, this message is a mess. I will probably go to sleep. I will continue to fight tomorrow",3.8005797101449295,6.240249596273293,4.207180124223601,84.01644306418221,74.77639751552796,6.529358178053831,25.64016563146997,7.554174236665415,1.5177499792960665,679,24,119,9,15,213,106,161,0.157,0.6890000000000001,0.154,0.3485,2,0,0,0,1,0,48.0,0,0,0,1,10,17,2,0,6,0,15,8,4,1,2,27,30,4,0,4,5,0,5,5,0,2,2,0,2,0,10,4,1,0,8,6,0,6,5,3,1,0,2,6,13,14,16,24,4,21,0,0,1,1,5,2,1,1,17,79,23,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397697720823961,0.26889398203248016,0.0752430687329488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09105222371834452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415158967982924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953117247919156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834182121897395,0.0,0.0,0.07135751128773128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321847255831527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308063415015165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27972969032846523,0.23713655625334665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886480011747023,0.09280460847699128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761151539396116,0.0,0.0,0.07416367608097035,0.0,0.11098695144006407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702802135884037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986232763514036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052592220831693,0.0,0.11146419633231804,0.11150513566198128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133753516799848,0.0,0.0,0.2137251769918164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929509335376914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221351868636592,0.0,0.14176531138053322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135765207023115,0.0,0.0,0.2214517983072177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385912925771587,0.0,0.11793390549195297,0.08836203209172895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428253796332704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940331221760345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451856769258019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19578561835767547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994840348048381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665878782016697,0.0,0.08055159992080918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26889398203248016,0.0
mentalhealth,potato2009,2020/02/19,"Need advice about overcoming eating disorder and body positivity I (18F) have been struggling with my relationship with food for a few years now. My weight fluctuates around 7-10kg every year since I either binge every day or starve myself for a long period of time. 
The problem now is that I've been gaining a fair amount of weight since the past 3 months, yet I feel like I'm not struggling as much anymore with my diet, I eat when I'm hungry and stop when I'm full. There were still times when I binge or feel so ashamed of my body that I just want to starve again, but generally I'm still in control. I'm seeing my friends in a few days and they didn't know that i gained weight, I have been receiving comments from people saying that I noticeably got fatter, and I'm worried about getting judged by my friends. To them I was never this heavy.
I'm afraid this will send me into a spiral of starving myself again to lose weight as quickly as possible (which never work since I always gain them back).
I really want to lose weight in a healthy way, and keeping a steady weight, but I'm overwhelmed by waves of insecurities.
Has anyone ever felt the same and have any advice as to how I can avoid my obsession with rapid weight loss?",8.616728763040243,6.52933371311476,8.052712369597614,76.83684798807752,62.278688524590166,11.00387481371088,33.657228017883746,9.339509955726095,2.7129803278688525,982,28,197,13,11,310,141,244,0.174,0.7170000000000001,0.109,-0.9395,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,3,8,20,15,0,8,10,0,13,13,2,2,3,37,32,19,0,4,7,0,10,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,7,12,11,4,4,0,0,2,4,12,0,0,8,12,26,3,30,23,7,35,0,4,1,0,10,6,0,2,27,122,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284283127729526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933068230467876,0.0,0.0,0.056661901835653165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263315809121408,0.05826076672280622,0.0,0.0,0.07417435604040734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406957050288076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18510419318053556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345284754897047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747175435313974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549437326327403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705186693235615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536963180977498,0.1404049669370294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426033930202245,0.05952534232648465,0.08000230608681998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007534435735257,0.0,0.12874893325817316,0.0,0.043532371009948036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664031451096432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406053259526367,0.0,0.0,0.04579166051349561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04070698122326655,0.0,0.0,0.07373745810780212,0.0,0.186432288479794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06650692476399271,0.0,0.06125134860727655,0.061782299478621634,0.12852631798082906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486279089520354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07954039584348371,0.05776506983147716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939331758921364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972802016091281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05337828648147014,0.0,0.0,0.08945677918091319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662610976353942,0.0,0.0,0.0663969454023239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067747670151135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13308231236953602,0.06966102692385323,0.0,0.17421275121054774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717160160356614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982910955567074,0.06613722403037488,0.0,0.7102473029358376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606594989316144,0.08461766188971649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731343259274433
mentalhealth,QuestionEverythingCS,2020/02/19,"Ex got a new boyfriend So about a year a ago my ex broke up with me because I was being a depressed anxious mess and she could no longer deal with it. The last straw was her finding me at a restaurant piss drunk out of my mind where she left me to run an errand.

At that time I was seriously struggling with depression and anxiety and my medication was not working as it should have, I was also having a stressful time writing stressful exams to become a CA/CPA. 

After that incident I volunteered to check into a mental health clinic to sort out my stuff and hopefully mend our relationship. A day later she visited me in hospital and broke up with me. We had been dating for 7 years at that point and basically grew up together before that. I was devastated.

Since then I’ve been focusing on my degree and business that I’m running part time. Have not been dating or even trying. I’m really self conscious as I am obese and on the short side(174) furthermore I have no self confidence whatsoever.

I feel really isolated and lonely and my family doesn’t seem to understand what I’m going through. I do see a therapist somewhat regularly, that seems to help, but not always.

Fast forward to 2 nights ago when I decided to visit my ex’s facebook page and guess what she has a new boyfriend. He’s fucking ugly and old and has a kid, hate him, but don’t even know him, just know he’s a cunt! I know it’s to be expected, but it really brought back all the hurt feelings and made me feel like a fuck up for making our relationship end. I feel angry, frustrated and hopeless.

I have no prospects in terms of dating, barely any friends and my family are recluses and keep to themselves. I just want to punch my fists through a fucking wall!!!! I want her back!!! I wish I didn’t fuck it up. 

Tonight I’m drinking myself to sleep, thinking about doing drugs, suicide and whatever else could make me ache with every vessel in my body and psyche.

So what do I do, where do I start? Am I fucked? Should I just give up? I don’t know anymore. Maybe someone out there does???",3.9235841411091665,5.416025534482763,5.008874940409979,82.47822739551886,71.98029556650246,8.292896869537582,28.367710154139523,8.841846274778883,2.2116525663435564,1621,62,318,31,31,533,216,406,0.222,0.727,0.051,-0.9972,0,2,2,0,0,2,48.0,3,0,0,1,16,24,9,3,19,0,35,15,3,3,1,73,72,30,1,9,10,3,4,1,1,2,5,0,0,3,15,29,3,1,15,2,1,8,10,21,0,0,14,5,51,3,46,52,5,59,0,7,1,5,28,25,7,7,29,213,66,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15652644475344504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060499799294813,0.07346385009422696,0.0,0.0,0.06003981677571513,0.0,0.06754114619503747,0.0997418867751808,0.08755935665176398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577819131624216,0.0,0.0538203962603181,0.0975087012119128,0.07512777307876982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806961541116986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098379688486987,0.0,0.0,0.05693935634778709,0.09102249038538368,0.15208705461192668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726264531266602,0.0,0.0,0.0864899958454365,0.1023876692011467,0.0,0.07375446121595652,0.0,0.07819819907503056,0.0,0.0,0.11662862661280025,0.0,0.07438762392542282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16646276977496213,0.0,0.17856708544045993,0.06307396206290189,0.0,0.0,0.08069490834367178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821216825116813,0.4081106191069229,0.0,0.08469523355196708,0.050176898312646885,0.0,0.07061309528083556,0.0,0.0972607234043038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871674998285646,0.0,0.09384749922985884,0.0,0.0,0.059178521002627375,0.0,0.0,0.08769129141668441,0.0,0.0,0.09451562434201263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847567171728081,0.0,0.0,0.19408617204981135,0.07196764147679881,0.0,0.0,0.09592668696277548,0.0,0.0,0.04313373916086144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354156113679415,0.11786771466625892,0.0,0.08869856507010841,0.0,0.0,0.08894227784085806,0.08897494516680972,0.0,0.0891471213685173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17054089742789588,0.0,0.08285361715247606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264486910868584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956088120070633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346201676816473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.169681343353668,0.0,0.0,0.18957953959773652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035521765551296,0.16075070019587615,0.1842101902243211,0.0,0.0,0.0730339006353703,0.0,0.08835315743306274,0.0,0.07480731862534216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06249168883201739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022704093802121,0.09229924626438332,0.10107023523799473,0.0965742691518304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025107935296827,0.0,0.05657227991498887,0.0,0.0,0.1544467702390962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994270433928325,0.0,0.0,0.09191237481139987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415074638733213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152844805577783,0.0,0.0,0.06427573172754295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11371095253967048
mentalhealth,milkdudz01,2020/02/19,"Separation anxiety??? I'm F(17) and still stick to my mom as if it's the first day of kindergarten. I don't have any problems talking to people, trying to make friends, driving myself places, however, I don't like being far from home. There are certain things that cause me to panic like going up to pay, ordering food, large crowds etc. Sometimes I can do it alone other times I end up crying in a corner. With my mom with me or honestly my older sister I'm fine. Because I'm the last kid in the house (siblings all in college) and my mom doesn't get along with my dad, I'm afraid she'll get lonely. It seems like everytime she leaves me on my own bad things happen. 

There was a school field trip today and my mom chaperoned yet got assigned to a different group. The trip was to a very busy college campus and the crowds had me crying. I had to slip away and cry in a less populated area. I ended up leaving with my mom instead of on the bus (went home).

Theres something very wrong and I'm not sure what. The closest thing I could find was separation anxiety, but it seems to be meant for little kids. I would love an outside opinion, perspective, or advice.",2.5480767651888385,4.558901512931037,3.722881773399013,88.0483908045977,76.97413793103449,6.488013136288997,23.978653530377674,7.447530270364453,1.056730870279146,909,30,184,12,21,295,142,232,0.11699999999999999,0.8220000000000001,0.062,-0.6756,2,3,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,1,6,15,0,2,13,0,17,2,0,2,3,29,33,11,0,4,5,7,0,3,1,2,0,0,2,2,10,11,1,0,4,0,1,5,4,6,0,1,8,0,23,9,29,20,4,32,0,1,0,1,17,16,0,6,13,113,33,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959184735594609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166167386156152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06675053596675758,0.0,0.15018059515969207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222229911273327,0.0,0.0819574984089988,0.05983596368622859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083489697540987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837085879066177,0.0,0.32346455311058103,0.06330353352034725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025538032913698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17387700296929576,0.0,0.10947167406851366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971427081215158,0.08349280691684033,0.11869256310061838,0.0,0.07583632054090135,0.0,0.102566592460875,0.0,0.05578522779358999,0.0,0.07850560193871199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680044410928764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196920158060928,0.0,0.0,0.11326069490059815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800115473167607,0.0,0.20786945734868412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14386453999318655,0.09837970507331993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859106898194061,0.0,0.06552096216865849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5748049911324692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11516679781294092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805012268370557,0.0,0.1025538032913698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939235695396428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934073455949152,0.0,0.17871799034947153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07556651828972466,0.09708037919096477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838878850314521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251237912333647,0.0,0.0,0.07889536309917214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19563464942088596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057236487636785925,0.0,0.09304193031976232,0.0,0.0,0.0666425691619107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619806046424093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909930813242256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972834484929019,0.10731992977611723,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Abdelrahman_Mohamed_,2020/02/19,"I feel hideous , stupid , and inferior I'm 20y male student , my major in college is  communication engineering , the thing is I'm too stupid to be there , i studied programming language ( c++ ) for 7 times whether in college or online courses and i gained nothing , i know the language but yet i can't solve any problem unlike other students who are far more better than me although they might have studied that for 2 times max .

the same thing applies to every subject in college , I'm NOT doubting myself , i know for sure  I'm too stupid , I'm just looking for some advice on how to cope with that , college is hell to me , i hate it , I'm lonely , failure , and i have zero experience in life , i have no memories as a child or teenager and I'm wasting my youth as well .

 I'm the same person as i was at 5 and will be at 40 , just growing up but no life experiences , my relationship with my family is not that good , they treat me very well and i don't hate them , but we aren't a FAMILY it's like we are some strangers living under the same roof we know nothing about each other except for some basic information literally .

very very very silent family which reflected on me growing up with anxiety , every member of the family is not that silent outside the family , on the contrary , they are so funny , loved , and charismatic with other people , but unfortunately  I'm not .

 lately i suffered from stuttering due to not speaking probably more than 5-10 words per day whether I'm in college or home , so depressed for more than 2 years , probably outcast is the right word to describe my daily adventures in college .

I'm planning to suicide at  40 if not before , because at 40 either you lived a very good , successful life so you would get older remembering these days or you're 40 inferior stupid old man with no one around him and with no opportunity to achieve anything in the future , i searched everywhere and tried everything to improve but I'm too stupid to understand anything which is hurting me , i just want an advice to cope with that not to solve it .

( if you have any advice please keep in mind that you're talking to a very stupid naive person so make it clear and simple , BTW,  if you wonder how i managed to study communication engineering being that stupid , I CHEATED, thank you ) .",7.1523012232415875,6.9125820894495416,7.571146788990827,73.13803516819573,64.11467889908258,10.202446483180431,35.597859327217115,9.725611199111238,3.383475840978593,1805,76,328,32,24,594,206,436,0.222,0.6459999999999999,0.132,-0.9944,0,2,0,0,0,1,49.0,3,5,4,6,18,33,11,1,15,0,24,4,0,3,2,77,51,34,1,6,26,0,1,1,0,3,3,1,1,5,20,22,0,1,9,0,0,2,14,20,2,2,1,3,40,13,56,44,12,35,1,6,1,1,24,21,1,13,13,220,60,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553712500904818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847677985599195,0.0,0.06663958968148859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14336967439703818,0.07754715749789486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053101987830141986,0.0,0.07412494832699558,0.0,0.0,0.07704250005105674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235863047948648,0.0,0.07502847883228256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678935774813026,0.0,0.07828964777563836,0.17042232438278346,0.41060195525163545,0.0,0.04404588156532455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04551184278736737,0.0,0.0,0.14612895716911725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17200793144264315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737932167095447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325400558725214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742815835723901,0.0,0.0,0.14362159509665529,0.0,0.09826487416957412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845869857690285,0.04255797896600335,0.0,0.1538410173158821,0.0,0.07315120515891534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862097603386642,0.0,0.05814719311523457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241088447678354,0.08795716276607024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16717048983512922,0.0,0.09140822167379296,0.0,0.05902859108846002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06039172036300774,0.15212373200407714,0.0,0.09562159438547098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18784053802135,0.08335335372572097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935244916803538,0.09867965306611794,0.07439222104042155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528517107902552,0.0,0.08210097953976035,0.0,0.0,0.07001643080599533,0.0,0.08020000050265769,0.0,0.0,0.11574520441895984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159011680222002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05914257377323155,0.0,0.0,0.09068550489794476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312536257397949,0.05138025777820264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664629698439367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446804042535316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188107438228059,0.0,0.0,0.056096554814549664
mentalhealth,has2dogs,2020/02/19,"General mental health survey [MOD APPROVED][RESEARCH]  

Hello!

You will find a link below which is a questionnaire containing Multiple Choice Questions, These questions aim to gather data for my research project, this project aims to help the BPD community.

Being a recovering borderline, i wanted to do something to help this community, to help medical science get more insight on what we go through, going through literature, i found very few to nil papers actually trying to help people who have no access to a counsellor or in my case, being in a third world country with a HUGE stigma around mental illness.

By giving me your time and taking this survey i assure you, you will be helping my research, and in turn helping the entire community.

Find the form here : [Mental health survey](https://forms.gle/xxRp18NyckTBeSWS9)

Some points:- 

1) The only personal information being taken is age and gender, other than that no email/name/IP data being stored.

2) The survey is fully confidential, and is protected by my university ethics committee.

3) I am accountable to the Dean of the Computer science and engineering department of my  [university](https://christuniversity.in/)

4) This research is not being sponsored by anybody and is taken up by me as a requirement to complete my undergrad degree.

5) I will be acknowledging this board and the South Asian Mental Health Alliance (SAMHAA) in my work.

​

if you have any questions regarding the legalities of this survey, feel free to message me on reddit :)

​

Thank you

P.S. This survey contains a few triggers, so here is a trigger warning: Abuse, Anxiety, Self harm, Suicide",9.248036080360805,11.134216265682658,8.74365928659287,59.19051148011482,59.77490774907749,10.893070930709307,38.67179171791718,10.864195022040775,4.962030586305863,1332,64,174,33,18,424,165,271,0.08,0.8,0.12,0.8633,0,0,1,0,1,1,71.0,1,6,0,2,4,4,0,0,18,0,21,5,0,2,1,33,33,11,1,2,3,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,13,10,0,4,11,0,3,3,3,1,0,1,3,1,22,4,33,20,5,18,0,0,0,0,24,13,0,6,2,128,35,12,0.0,0.12084909927959875,0.09953380936176473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22102619377984875,0.2478736700743173,0.0693610747756983,0.0,0.07802699513842024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09079845344196884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12846094186332846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694132364470924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05157246320380167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18644579121725247,0.0,0.0,0.11183382860874852,0.0,0.0,0.05328892859160135,0.09784427639891394,0.11593385132660268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3252523289291965,0.0,0.0,0.41019637042317547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275067972119427,0.411153674764374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757288648386519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071148687570937,0.08905935461377623,0.0,0.0,0.09641960113923596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3427780573072814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106404528400916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07852184030766468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11156754740060976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668862702057065,0.0,0.0,0.0939046155480828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059474942655899136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692488855098622,0.11094283445595113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415774246674357,0.06016014118682734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425462091716599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478736700743173,0.0
mentalhealth,fredsify,2020/02/19,"Community for people diagnosed with Paranoid Personality Disorder R/ParanoidPersonality is a community I made since I could not find any other community especially for this. I think anyone eho knows about this disorder won’t think it strange that those of us who are paranoid and suspicious would like to take advice or talk about much of anything with anyone - but I urge you, if you have PPD or know someone who does join/and or share to those you know. I’d like to get to know some fellow sufferers. Hole this isn’t breaking any rules?",6.384458874458872,8.002267474747478,6.8509668109668125,71.13454545454549,66.17171717171718,10.1015873015873,31.31457431457432,10.290406445055957,3.323524098124098,436,17,77,11,7,142,67,99,0.145,0.779,0.077,-0.5944,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,3,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,1,0,20,16,6,0,3,6,0,0,2,1,2,1,0,0,1,10,3,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,8,3,12,12,2,1,0,1,0,0,10,0,0,5,2,47,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817517964022883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25296544810532184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601035348891305,0.0,0.15305772984648952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148501574745795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18878063074905696,0.0,0.0,0.42633191159285977,0.0,0.16276515105244765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999571905115682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717451570509647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4088711301954364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18173515912025232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17599261276339528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367274512990796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289452551128474,0.1624033337192319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538566770625021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15759264346449092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984481181682526,0.14949543543555466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383556930643949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237286347742738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13212524622444552,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TomuraShigaraki_Toko,2020/02/19,"Repetitive negative thoughts I get triggered and disturbed by certain things and images I see on the devices I own. I have a normal day and the images that trigger me pops up and ruin the rest of the day or week. And I also feel kind of dirty by doing certain things. I used to feel dirty for watching porn and the ads that pop up in between but I overcame from that but there are still certain things that haunt me for a long time and ruin my mental health. These thoughts and the dirty feeling keeps disturbing me and I always come to the conclusion that is to buy a new device. Laptop or mobile. I feel like all the negative thoughts I experienced gets vanished when I break the device and throw them away. I feel satisfied and will carry on using the new device but that is not the end. It happens again. The images that disturb me pops up again and I would do the things that make feel dirty and end up breaking the devices again. I've changed like 4 mobiles and 2 laptops so far because of this repetitive negative thoughts. I've recently bought a new mobile and felt a good vibe from it. I started to focus on things I've always wanted to and I was in good shape until the same thing occurred again. I've gone through the same thing again yesterday and I feel like I should move on and the things that trigger and disturb me are inevitable and the only way for me is to accept it. Though I feel like I should move on these negative thoughts are ruining my progress and my mental health. Any kind of advice, suggestion and words from you guys will be helpful and I would appreciate it.",4.841654486992105,6.079359691318331,4.87237795966092,85.30845586085944,69.45016077170418,7.583805904706226,29.57044723764981,7.84624498591911,1.8476353697749195,1268,48,245,15,22,394,139,311,0.174,0.696,0.13,-0.9545,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,1,2,11,19,0,4,23,0,17,3,0,6,4,66,44,33,0,6,6,0,9,4,0,6,2,0,0,1,24,24,0,1,16,0,2,5,5,7,0,0,9,12,31,12,33,28,5,45,0,3,2,1,5,14,0,2,27,177,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616058178699301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051105422674157,0.1467322049415431,0.0,0.0,0.0599599305541926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284042323047837,0.0,0.0,0.05374878531396657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327420237438212,0.07595230359100226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372719091290315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15618830428870553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566589845625666,0.18897011624121485,0.08465887239461893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213238024331284,0.0,0.0,0.14790884989390982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730406522285576,0.07797013949757466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874452601188824,0.0,0.0,0.05909978078168615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837125559425442,0.0,0.1836349771577696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17230538955768526,0.0,0.0,0.07802937642669289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05885544265042517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17771311838589346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18742559861156874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25547097531855834,0.0,0.0,0.08638976296063032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705871991606542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705913590789345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026160623554661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06240854026219414,0.0,0.07041421086441339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.468620057187732,0.0,0.08662846576416121,0.34999328613645303,0.051413756821019466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523044620999277,0.0,0.0,0.05200608409482757,0.0699867676769915,0.07072619743921148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526960733032513,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ebbenner,2020/02/19,"Seeking Mens Eating Disorder Support Group in NYC Hi there,

Wondering if anyone knows of or has come across a mens eating disorder support group that meets in NYC.

I a center called Balance, but you need to be a patient of the center to attend the meetings I believe. 

Thanks in advance for the help!",8.004940476190477,7.708527232142861,7.704285714285718,73.07404761904766,62.39285714285714,9.609523809523813,38.30952380952381,8.841846274778883,3.5530309523809525,239,11,39,3,3,76,40,56,0.062,0.7490000000000001,0.19,0.8268,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,7,9,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,9,8,0,9,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,3,0,25,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15093551361999802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24320220624253694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22041892164318536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18594573338994297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4947923993135469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4417608003444873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14468754153675664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186319402901283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16005870895584967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48991457851416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987364434539925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340927962161363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FrecklesandGlasses,2020/02/19,"Benefits of Quitting Meds?  I've been on 300mg of Wellburtrin and 40mg of Prozac for the past year. Things have been really great lately, and my doc suggested that I start to taper off on my meds.

I'm definitely not against the idea, but is there any real benefit of discontinuing medication? All i can find online is that people quit because they ""don't want to depend on a pill anymore."" Well, I certainly do not care if I depend on a medication that improves my life...

So other than that, what are the benefits of quitting? Why do people work towards getting off of their medication?",4.305079365079365,6.181029428571431,5.909761904761902,74.85746031746035,71.67857142857143,9.263492063492064,29.408730158730158,9.725611199111238,3.026693253968254,464,19,84,12,9,158,75,112,0.04,0.759,0.201,0.9606,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,4,3,7,0,0,5,0,10,6,0,2,2,14,15,5,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,9,7,18,13,1,11,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,3,4,59,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636637289015796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15511991341404172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953480647535316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594737316490972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14295887582874586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171946683094349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724461590984051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17657151932086124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764409576396292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047930338666996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34747971736776273,0.4727096782720683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14931414460210082,0.21687450504369699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4990942304743145,0.0,0.17803252046512752,0.10020233243482836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107101026252742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391401242031643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225658672816037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14063429523622195,0.0,0.14113862860676435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387070807126322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007250040811403
mentalhealth,Fleemp,2020/02/19,"Medication So basically my life is at the point right now where I doubt I’ll make any progress without pharmaceutical intervention. My symptoms are just too high and my problems are too large to handle on my own.

But I REALLY don’t want to do it. How do I bring myself to accomplish this task. It makes me quite anxious and stressed.",3.5528645833333314,5.955391890625003,4.6106250000000015,81.00520833333336,75.40625,8.016666666666666,27.854166666666664,8.841846274778883,2.294872916666668,267,11,52,6,6,87,50,64,0.145,0.743,0.11199999999999999,-0.3142,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,7,3,0,2,1,0,6,3,0,3,0,11,10,5,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,9,0,6,10,1,8,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,1,1,36,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18239380369881966,0.0,0.0,0.3030039579398022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28338139729461304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18944653114664176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35806806159278204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27019603383588303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535476542106571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566432891840372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852771749405921,0.0,0.0,0.17182389561365827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290521430048745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30723669161409484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27877564670431776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15819877384552808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585474294977387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,y-llygod,2020/02/19,"I feel like I’m becoming something I don’t want to be I have a feeling my mental healthy is declining to an extremely deadly point, I’ve been having homicidal thoughts where I’ll have the random urge to kill someone, this urge has been growing every day...",6.3085333333333375,6.648945320000003,6.722000000000001,76.55433333333336,65.8,9.866666666666667,36.66666666666667,9.725611199111238,3.633866666666668,206,10,37,4,3,67,40,50,0.09300000000000001,0.7140000000000001,0.192,0.25,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,3,0,9,0,0,0,0,5,14,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,2,4,1,3,10,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3575844155653817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088083033538033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727946808445437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3274210716214495,0.2313051612967268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3582094326573702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15818027229658027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32628938107062505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30607234141178463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274333787428072,0.24925806818287385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570414469107698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909710790664415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MattR9590,2020/02/19,"5 tips to beat depression I made this video to give some of my tips on how I manage my depression. It’s been a lifelong struggle for me, but I feel like I’m starting to get a grip on it. Maybe this can help someone out I’m not sure? Let me know what you think.

https://youtu.be/W3ZIgjWGQrU",1.065472154963679,3.5106353050847474,1.6971428571428575,97.90711864406781,85.77966101694916,5.405326876513318,20.292978208232448,6.868970318607317,0.2303588377723971,229,7,51,3,7,70,44,59,0.14800000000000002,0.738,0.114,0.0018,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,1,5,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,2,1,10,12,2,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,8,2,8,9,1,4,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,30,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4876633665423748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14314273207169748,0.202245094161674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790689360001555,0.2715731646551724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897544590680551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155583123597607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289486636985587,0.0,0.1383072642469125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678739426845328,0.0,0.0,0.2844097478246179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239867810813542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20037804949606988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959552427224343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668162856419204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813976116949376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dontgveup,2020/02/19,"I miss my mom so much more when I'm sick, or in physical pain ""Going nuts right now"" It's been hard enough to move on without her, she has been gone for 5 years, she died at a young age(47). I think it also has to do with delayed pain. Though I witnessed my mothers body before the embalmers received her. It still couldn't set in that she's gone. I have been on so many anti depressants, but when I get sick or hurt, I cant take it. I break down, and it feels like she passed yesterday. Just hearing the sound of her voice at times would make me better.

I have been threw a lot in my life, and just don't understand why it has to be one thing after the next, but I can deal with it better if I just had my physical health..

I am so not surprised about my fate, its just the usual for me. After all I have been dealing with the past few months, I just don't know how to handle this anymore.. OF all the stories I have heard about life after loosing a parent,, there is always comments like ""it get's better each year"". But in my case, The B.S problems that come with my life just keep knocking me down. I don't get why it has to be so hard, why cant I just have my physical health. I keep asking what I did to deserve so much pain nothing is helping..

My life has been so traumatic, I have anxiety attacks when im actually at peace because Im worried about the next thing to take it back away, and unsurprisingly, Sunday After injuring myself trying to fix my car that keeps giving me issues, I just said forget it, I am not going to let this get me down.. Monday I woke up, wasn't worried about my car, wasn't worried about my landlord harassing  me over petty things like my car leaking oil. I came to the sense, I actually feel ok.. Then came the anxiety of what is next?! I was so terrified, that i couldn't even leave the house, because it's just so accurate that whenever I feel peace, something is about to take it.

I finally decided to leave against my anxiety to get something to eat.. For a minute I thought things were going to actually be ok. First bite, within 1 second I'm in excruciating pain, about 10 mins later my face swells up.. OK I knew it had to be something. Again I am not surprised at all......... Life is so much harder when you can predict the future. 

Please someone reach out to me with advice on how to deal with my life. These anti depressants I have been on do nothing, switching isn't an option since I have been on them all, and stayed with the only ones that didn't cause overwhelming side effects",5.718046136742637,5.020098667315178,6.238935519733187,83.02857003891053,67.19066147859921,9.210561423012788,30.224847137298497,8.418075326091056,1.9650730405780992,1961,61,420,24,28,639,226,514,0.184,0.732,0.085,-0.9947,1,1,3,0,0,0,78.0,0,1,1,5,39,23,2,1,18,3,55,18,2,5,4,64,93,28,2,5,19,3,5,3,0,1,15,5,1,0,30,16,1,4,10,0,0,15,15,12,0,4,26,11,66,11,67,59,12,75,0,5,0,0,23,25,0,5,35,298,96,0,0.0,0.0,0.19896451063010595,0.0,0.0,0.06641207555677782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05434951069006528,0.056550165279068865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15597316131273395,0.0,0.06740044367447731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353567438460925,0.07731704701005887,0.0638529166427764,0.0522588943431234,0.0,0.08285850251524296,0.0,0.05783100095085642,0.0,0.0,0.18032167283493636,0.0,0.07549091087988304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546177175935091,0.0,0.06981611099700727,0.0,0.058543594067959816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21019876587479852,0.11707183960655344,0.0,0.07053424646552921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954250710412774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702233318166992,0.0,0.04488852750546863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030915019643092,0.04855235568089448,0.0,0.07444949265441103,0.0,0.057808786937912436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17753775772636352,0.06519573163630657,0.11587380279409808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176193132961388,0.0,0.0,0.14448171680816532,0.07659856974381088,0.0,0.045553767456742784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841949051335552,0.07275516013848582,0.0,0.1468221195218591,0.07093509358808714,0.0,0.18122432462930166,0.0,0.0,0.03735036039399305,0.0,0.0,0.14392474770597058,0.0,0.06949616366246432,0.2880231390498449,0.0996089944451186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05777920633593993,0.0,0.0,0.04536543304559846,0.06890321150525912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959674728943239,0.05424694323760574,0.07223328091631394,0.1498805624940576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21683636606570136,0.0,0.0,0.13042352102510182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210616895961378,0.051688471473144704,0.2892671623208036,0.0,0.07546420789650236,0.0,0.06487780563798112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460231191573928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503084302068507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058039522493105476,0.06464781034835401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056219203684641054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05758432517382454,0.15696233903603946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243888099857004,0.05427486438937047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329781150628746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806048079057392,0.043547564894883865,0.06677271780638938,0.05395455806164952,0.039629424869677535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04614201179645504,0.0,0.0,0.07075126038330024,0.0,0.0,0.07485098740401336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18397649879377925,0.0,0.0,0.06551333313458353,0.0,0.0,0.2070573636227828,0.0,0.04827854254487729,0.0,0.0,0.08753112111481945
mentalhealth,miramathebeatqueen,2020/02/19,"When you are having an episode (depressive, bipolar etc) how do you communicate to your significant other? Can you? My boyfriend is likely major depressed.  He goes through episode where he just withdraws communication for sometimes days at a time, with zero communication. 


Had it up to here.  I’m ready to leave unless he learns how to tell me what’s up.  Otherwise it comes off as him simply not caring about me.  


Thanks",4.2955000000000005,7.3065539333333325,4.58625,78.87937500000002,76.33333333333334,6.95,28.04166666666667,8.07648339933343,2.1763666666666674,335,14,57,6,8,105,62,75,0.08800000000000001,0.818,0.094,0.1109,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,4,0,0,7,5,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,2,0,8,10,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,8,3,14,9,2,9,0,2,0,0,9,5,0,0,4,43,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31171625633307465,0.0,0.0,0.2633628262629229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971731797830119,0.0,0.5266566059950134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409743006734441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237282313161498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14936622139404648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3023788088143688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672250494058997,0.2814788512502425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782759924977759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jeweltonesarethebest,2020/02/19,"Self Neglect? Now don't worry, I've already scheduled an appointment with my therapist over this but I wanted to see if I could get any more information on this.

I'm not elderly - apparently this is just a thing more common with them? I'm 19 and while my parents keep things clean, I have a habit of living in what is essentially a hoarders room. Old food and filth and bugs - it's disgusting and I'm disgusting and I'm finally starting to come to terms with this and I'm desperate. I want to be better - I don't want to live like this for the rest of my life.

Does anyone have any information on this? Or anything that could help - on the rare chance I manage to clean my room it ends up messy again very soon after. It's like I get anxious when it's not a disaster - I have a history of child abuse figured that might help give context",2.140676470588236,4.207580288235294,3.6855147058823534,87.56356617647059,78.47058823529412,7.3088235294117645,24.15441176470589,8.278499904357787,1.4622647058823532,659,23,139,13,16,218,101,170,0.136,0.6709999999999999,0.193,0.8374,2,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,5,6,2,0,8,0,11,2,0,0,0,27,26,11,0,6,6,1,0,2,0,1,1,0,4,2,15,10,1,2,3,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,1,13,3,20,22,4,22,0,1,1,0,9,8,0,3,15,87,28,1,0.0,0.19217408886841986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17898578375501706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205957914028802,0.0,0.0,0.1832337407972162,0.0,0.1134102415078941,0.0,0.13347234295711813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434479506539337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971629357030174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589983940572273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14193759494883626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14365628126145188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17767626565237646,0.0,0.0,0.19612636446737025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16947997725944292,0.15559184785025032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174312543856204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441660204678397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456284868051765,0.15848018593894686,0.0,0.2864416217783021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17206284826591875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17019595759920084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800979183525799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12924810360445102,0.0,0.1692043500432768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480217873997008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18832044167033735,0.21550978175574773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338275384440521,0.2869997473136093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647164980921803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlessBruh69,2020/02/19,"Something is wrong... So I’m not sure if this is the right place to be putting this and also please excuse the grammatical errors I don’t feel like making everything proper.
So for the last month or two I’ve been working my ass off and haven’t missed any school or work and have been feeling completely beat to say the least. I’ve finally felt content with what I want to do with my life and I made a good chunk of money this year and I was exited to see what’s next to come. But this past week I’ve been feeling careless and lazy not sure why...
Yesterday I was feeling WEAK like to the point where I was unable to lift my arms, it hurt to walk, breathing was even hard... I was unable to properly type (I was drunk texting basically) and I kept messing up 
Cut to this morning: I woke up with a Migraine and little to no motivation to do anything got ready walked out the house and went to school. It just seemed like a normal morning to me until one of my friends pointed out I was wearing two different shoes Not just a little different ALOT different one was white (adidas) and one was black (Nike) and I froze and just came up with an excuse... I’ve felt cloudy all day, confused, and barely able to put sentences together without sounding under the influence of something. 
I’m not exactly sure what’s going on maybe I’m just over thinking it but I don’t feel like myself 
Just looking for some feedback Thankyou",5.148509292210357,5.7396304483985805,5.489792408066431,83.50858343218667,68.35943060498221,8.379675761170423,30.201858442071966,8.344100000000001,2.065462475286674,1120,41,223,15,18,357,154,281,0.091,0.8190000000000001,0.09,-0.2841,3,0,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,4,10,17,1,1,13,0,21,9,5,4,5,60,46,22,0,3,15,0,9,4,1,0,3,2,0,0,11,21,1,1,10,1,1,8,9,8,0,5,20,15,19,9,35,25,4,35,0,2,4,1,4,17,1,7,14,140,30,7,0.102675166590236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210929362669578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982263416284765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449291361259684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11743303760274915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884455645369201,0.10765295869307047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621698834610079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3218210873746987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781597918029217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922778191983437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25957824635797044,0.1467023190550659,0.1971685230858012,0.1124756262771098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932657901085334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835266332337372,0.08611905834560615,0.0821187102771827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197678180683568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847335681338513,0.10991588941315324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369396464297674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252250662810257,0.20064760029199144,0.20581498131503115,0.0,0.0,0.08622128053430618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715372520934996,0.06853647098471749,0.0,0.10315100532026816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195433839409823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091962044930846,0.0,0.10059986325640337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20872605040722306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801506444764448,0.0,0.0,0.10727369579156626,0.11270650014222648,0.194122439949022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064338029889804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876840312604825,0.0,0.08165141355198435,0.0,0.20782550030969768,0.0818188143737867,0.093471615454181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580887189918956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903103882018383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579010090950488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005974369468866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060560473476758026,0.0,0.08235982536811147,0.0,0.0,0.09518090808762483,0.09264836774713392,0.0,0.0,0.09897519662112338,0.0,0.14949748826604792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225917644874192,0.0,0.06611944094654322
mentalhealth,truin71,2020/02/19,"Is this the norm for psych wards ? I am going to shadow a psychiatrist soon, however I was reading about this place, and apparently it can be violent. I was honestly shocked about what I read about it, and how badly it’s ran. 

A lot of adolescents go there for behavioral issues, I read about a patient who got jumped by 9 other dudes there and there was only one  female staff to break it up and she barely did anything. Nothing happened to the 9 kids.

There are reviews that say it’s understaffed and at times the staff are hit. They also place suicidal kids, and those with mental health issues in the same room ward as those with violent problems which leads to a lot of fights.. 

Is this normal? I just don’t know if all psych/ mental health places are like this, or is this place is an exception.",4.789712609970675,6.036137296774192,5.13126099706745,83.37143695014663,69.58064516129032,8.47507331378299,26.34897360703813,8.841846274778883,1.8491935483870967,631,19,123,11,11,200,99,155,0.131,0.8340000000000001,0.035,-0.9456,2,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,1,1,12,8,3,0,9,0,15,2,0,2,1,21,22,11,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,2,17,8,0,0,1,3,0,5,1,6,0,1,6,1,8,2,20,14,4,16,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,4,3,90,25,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925954946330027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243133714101808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140767803454187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552951054159988,0.0,0.10927207982307093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081768463851485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904535309281056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28520353792212344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508592988465547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06674843199986967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23230862513600595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753732086620391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338642101274957,0.1310960758035371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258113270518874,0.10391002667545186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5709792474765111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073237494587872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4099881181341373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108650266780896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14944637684615988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966756373286266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BrainHacker11,2020/02/19,"Recovering Bipolar and Benzo Addict trying to help people suffering like me through building a virtual therapist website and writing a book Hi guys, I just joined this subreddit because I am looking for people who share the same struggle. I have been living with bipolar disorder for 5 years now. I am currently taking Lamotrigine and Risperidone. At some point I was taking Valium, a Benzo for my anxiety disorder. I stopped it almost 2 years and I went through horrible withdrawals but I am now seeing the light at the end of the tunnel. After lots of struggle, therapy, reading books, learning about coping mechanisms, I am feeling and I look almost symptoms free. I feel more like a calm introvert now. I am currently writing a book about my struggles with bipolar disorder and my Benzodiazepine addiction, how I was able to overcome those and how I am living a pretty normal life now.  I am going to therapy and I realized how expensive it is without insurance. To bring some value, help people suffering feel slightly better, I am currently building a virtual therapist using AI which people could use to talk about their feelings and externalize their worries. It would be great if you guys could help me add some values to your life and tell me how I could help in any possible way. Thanks",6.3141991341991375,8.51847351515152,6.8851298701298695,68.55721861471864,67.0952380952381,10.154978354978356,36.642857142857146,10.380263240014207,4.622205194805195,1046,55,153,29,18,342,129,231,0.11599999999999999,0.682,0.20199999999999999,0.9778,3,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,2,1,12,13,0,3,11,0,18,8,0,6,0,44,33,16,0,6,4,0,4,2,0,1,8,0,0,2,7,13,0,1,6,4,2,3,1,5,0,0,4,8,28,9,23,24,6,20,0,2,3,0,17,4,0,7,14,114,35,5,0.09691278768204972,0.0,0.0,0.21129848687632896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19408831568079216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590401890488845,0.0,0.07413801731480328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059077135859003364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571148517061797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321309252964342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3332113524414004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583596464694009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960080694220062,0.06923451488414692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055077770595777405,0.0,0.0,0.10684669055165537,0.0,0.19191779282400728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598343949975547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690473598292105,0.09469338561491904,0.0,0.17115153409565595,0.0,0.1627646670872853,0.0,0.0,0.08239178645319503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949539553952687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687484980830939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916139093408106,0.10925460669758698,0.0,0.09859514584872776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09693901365874444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07722694444167448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102342996956778,0.0,0.3039428631222245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007294936453083,0.1457327107833226,0.07789482774767968,0.08470604803813847,0.0892242742539715,0.22165643749523875,0.22504643210263556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579742131365304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740306495953147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692485994305355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983912510893226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342046898460266,0.0,0.0,0.09841964014978337,0.0,0.06884406380561116,0.0,0.0,0.12481731571336988
mentalhealth,Kalenden,2020/02/19,"Searching for Scientifically Supported Methods to improving Mental Well-being, Health, and overall Happiness I am looking for scientifically supported guidelines, hits and tips for Mental Well-being, Health, and overall Happiness.
Overall, I am not unhappy but have OCD-like tendencies (with an accompanying mild eating disorder) and am less mentally stable, in control, and healthy than I would like. 

Searching beyond the basics, which I've already found and are limiting substances like caffeine, nicotine, alcohol and recreational drugs, good nutrition, good sleep, exercise, social support and avoiding negative self-talk.

I am looking more for stuff like techniques, such as deep breathing and relaxation techniques, or meditation, mindfulness and so on. Many claims here, but what is proven?
Difficulty is finding the real deal in mental guidelines and support and going beyond the basics (such as sleep) into proven techniques that are scientifically validated.

Can you guys help me in this search?",14.619622119815665,14.04517381935484,12.45861751152074,45.179354838709685,49.516129032258064,15.05069124423963,53.11059907834101,13.707050652182113,7.877930875576037,822,48,93,24,7,255,100,155,0.06,0.6609999999999999,0.27899999999999997,0.9895,0,1,3,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,0,2,6,13,0,1,4,0,11,9,3,1,0,26,20,18,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,1,5,0,0,1,5,14,2,3,2,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,2,6,12,16,17,2,9,0,0,2,0,5,8,0,1,3,65,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871775911094028,0.0,0.0,0.12258679168097313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12459303347044805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452537526167746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12731483262718013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128825152858186,0.1136692932937858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153111193329516,0.0,0.0,0.1218006895867447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06313305738386703,0.18634828790067992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999316871652816,0.0,0.2365074375560079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361596572707147,0.0,0.0,0.07445898586779688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628138598357955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18656948086557815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262434565017534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4477965364811569,0.0,0.11216576787781668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12644083592798422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11588751896999873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22233358959381808,0.11323876804685702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271675447398666,0.0,0.5042388901016254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928717660329052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19976033371154686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789127116759419,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,swingaxeok,2020/02/19,"Indiana/US - Can I tell a therapist my friend very rarely harms themselves without them being committed? What if they've been a past patient there too? My friend cuts herself when she's very very upset. I've only known her to do it once, and I triggered it. I know there was another episode before I met her.

It's part of my own healing that I convey the full story but my friend has a job and life and would never forgive me if I got her committed.",1.947973137973136,4.146248021978025,3.265421245421248,89.66013431013431,79.76923076923076,6.242246642246642,24.3968253968254,7.3871296695380915,1.144368986568986,354,13,72,5,9,115,65,91,0.10800000000000001,0.77,0.122,0.5071,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,4,7,1,1,4,0,7,2,0,1,3,15,10,7,0,3,4,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,17,4,3,4,3,4,0,0,0,0,12,1,0,2,3,50,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091638204411943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16973600953442028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46233479708646796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15953600809218993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19794521518328895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962461350679684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14089299704335065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384513005318504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124312066601116,0.0,0.15170747077749436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160087749358752,0.1904186276439946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743473502228615,0.0,0.0,0.2316024063390237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399402971377295,0.0,0.0,0.4937559565465808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922839230642548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416992101635732,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xx_NICEMEME_Xx,2020/02/19,"Mental hygiene tips Hi everyone, first time on here.

I recently discovered a TED talk on mental hygiene and it made so much sense but I have never thought about it.

Could anyone share mental health hygiene tips to prevent mental health decline that you guys use?

I can off the bat think of meditation but that's quite general.

I'm eager to hear any tips you guys have :)",2.308174603174603,5.174489214285714,3.1204761904761935,86.54341269841271,85.42857142857143,5.9682539682539675,23.49206349206349,7.3871296695380915,1.3698730158730168,295,11,53,5,9,93,51,70,0.0,0.84,0.16,0.8909,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,2,3,2,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,2,1,11,10,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,4,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,5,2,7,7,1,7,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,4,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318841848611208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638232801062365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289291888728955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590454860948273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157817061708505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296137596774602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35384684987915904,0.18759579556411224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749443770386895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6709503039251925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235634622904175,0.0,0.1283727707224557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770349189878785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16434451836590594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378231718663816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665133968765288,0.0,0.13213886731485674,0.09705551306036052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437551797853391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_have_failed_a_lot,2020/02/19,Need help I am a university student (20 years of age).  Sometime I linger over one thing and sometime over another. I can't specialize in one as I can't stay motivated over one topic over  long. I like doing one thing one day and possibly  hate doing same task next day.  I am aware about these situation  but can't do anything.Is this a symptom of mood swing(Bipolar Disorder)? Can Bipolar Disorder be treated?,3.888701298701299,6.250634493506496,5.097402597402599,78.10896103896107,74.1948051948052,8.555844155844158,31.779220779220786,9.23628265651192,3.206537662337662,324,16,58,8,7,107,52,77,0.11199999999999999,0.838,0.05,-0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,1,0,2,0,10,2,0,1,0,6,12,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,5,0,0,6,3,9,11,1,12,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,7,40,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17860865529783698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21970096080474213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3904319918040876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816824681253284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11417039774621675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321593836484145,0.0,0.0,0.15073905223833606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12629951597866465,0.0,0.0,0.1811507261397103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5771091246725643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19202449163648827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19146105690700232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369267305858705,0.0,0.0,0.1815519619480658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770408625750735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22632291361035636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968865442732983
mentalhealth,Pleasuredinpurgatory,2020/02/19,Mental Health Tips for Nomads I'm not sure if there are many nomads here but I wonder if there any tips you can share if you've been dealing with mental health issues while traveling long term. Who did you turn to and what helps you keep your head above water?,4.000576923076924,5.555729442307693,3.549230769230772,92.77076923076923,71.88461538461539,5.9692307692307685,16.846153846153847,5.985473137389443,-0.5344769230769231,209,2,43,1,4,62,41,52,0.027999999999999997,0.857,0.115,0.6926,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,4,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,1,10,8,6,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,5,2,3,6,1,4,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,4,3,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579016020785081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393844256840088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383006274546195,0.493628104656379,0.0,0.0,0.1556364388961812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423528497242457,0.0,0.20638694376159036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054866213666796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354108357200561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4679989760518161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21884248064980347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525631466406155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518072308601173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Upstairs-Newt,2020/02/19,"I’m in love with my fake boyfriend Last year I created this fake boyfriend account, got him a decent amount of followers, and texted back and forth through his and my account to make it look like we’ve been talking. I know that by itself is pretty weird, but it keeps getting weirder. I created this whole backstory and personality for him and I even added him to a group chat with my friends so that they could interact with “him”. I talked about him everyday and we were “dating” for a year and a half and I felt like it went to far so I just told everyone that we broke up. I still think about him everyday and I talk about him often. My friends have texted him and they still keep in contact with him. It’s gotten so bad that sometimes I forget he’s fake for like half a second and then I’ll get sad when I realize. I’ve been dreaming about him and everything and as weird as it seems I think I’m in love with my fake boyfriend. Someone please help.",3.3552504317789307,4.809759481865285,3.7347357512953394,91.20331260794478,73.35233160621762,7.426459412780657,26.33816925734024,8.021203637495839,1.3308144386873917,752,26,165,11,15,234,100,193,0.156,0.6709999999999999,0.17300000000000001,0.5519,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,2,0,2,0,14,16,0,0,5,0,6,2,0,1,0,34,26,21,0,1,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,12,20,0,2,6,2,2,2,0,9,0,3,8,2,32,7,24,17,2,18,0,2,1,2,30,5,0,2,14,108,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087231393111587,0.13125024042444666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255064424637845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038250092495594,0.0,0.0,0.1502053933107963,0.14127563367221038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15093068020651912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428950491931028,0.0,0.164254524373428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257222258993511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536367732205967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794421088044549,0.0,0.0,0.08638959058989566,0.12813391118467546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303908224288227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200318504852748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28374704765419617,0.0,0.10492806887006297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13725554556745015,0.0,0.1725515661823954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15992258658172687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310331364974022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318977979559704,0.0,0.15546866798842585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510703117431716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3790392182347305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014468542081843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502053933107963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14572020904257532,0.0,0.1755012418076131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024552812132962
mentalhealth,hershal2003,2020/02/19,"I need help and some advice and I’m scared So, I (17F) have been having anxiety for about 2 years, it’s not diagnosed and I think I’m having depression right now. I am trying to determine whether to talk to my school counsellor after a break of 2 months or not until I find a therapist which I think I need. Now my counsellor is great. He is kind and I am comfortable speaking with him except there is a part of me which  is making me not want to go talk to him. So here is a pro and con list. I would be really grateful if you all could help me decide. Please let me know if these points make sense or not. I’d really appreciate it. Also I’m kinda suicidal but I’m not going to tell him about it because he will call my parents. Now I am not going kill myself but I have the desire to die.  I’m so sorry that this is long, I could just really use some advice  

Reasons to go 
-I am really struggling in studies and have no motivation to do anything. Not even. Things I like like singing or dancing. Nothing  
- I get sad randomly. 
- I have been through this before and it was worse then now. I don’t want it to be like that again. 
- I have diabetes so the stress does physically affect me. 
-I don’t know who I am anymore  

Reasons not to go.  
- what if my counsellor (who is great) gets annoyed like my other counsellor. 
- what if I can’t be fixed and I can’t change myself, then the process will be a waste. 
- what if I get in trouble?",0.33377413127412936,2.5912264121621646,2.617745173745174,91.35775675675676,87.24324324324327,6.085559845559846,19.943629343629343,7.447530270364453,0.6738653667953671,1102,34,241,20,35,374,145,296,0.18,0.725,0.095,-0.9769,1,0,0,0,0,1,37.0,0,1,0,1,16,16,2,3,8,0,37,2,0,7,1,56,61,27,3,13,21,1,0,4,0,3,2,1,0,0,19,9,0,0,9,2,0,6,13,8,0,0,3,1,39,8,23,48,4,23,0,2,0,0,16,4,0,12,16,174,58,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21382768775348288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749485770441191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369808290509284,0.0,0.10850497370881737,0.0,0.0,0.09003481977540455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06669510723393719,0.0,0.0930995538847383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11171948554568573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157409026674854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747094058171552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423437136336092,0.11104849185745563,0.1135499433101149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574512215372266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226404206375828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999843812339318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17148607947561126,0.0,0.31090012766180314,0.0,0.0,0.24124905110300576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666996449173708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104556751386444,0.11393331423116401,0.12025736483689395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187878001928953,0.0,0.21380811429330984,0.0,0.0,0.0968240974707801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460635821234436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732973892884045,0.0,0.0,0.1622517385381375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498151012319586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148646874363793,0.11847998923081025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009894077447344,0.10342748372548884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28036249394706125,0.22498268503216445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343524343255093,0.0,0.0,0.10953814647804803,0.11072840706446686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247514585423833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532838460176998,0.11437872172920785,0.0,0.11967639937035225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17587866486959397,0.0956288566654624,0.0,0.0,0.1270330365839223,0.0726869100007086,0.1402105721090874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428197062064996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449480925592438,0.0,0.0,0.12906529274142986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149778064105062,0.07772147635751532,0.0,0.0,0.07045622756681688
mentalhealth,portablecouch,2020/02/19,"My psychiatrist won’t actually HELP me Not sure if this is a result or reflection of her personal opinion or the way she was taught in schooling, but my psychiatrist is almost unwilling to hear me out and take what I feel and desire into consideration. I was under the impression that seeing a psychiatrist is a joint venture - however, she doesn’t hear me out about what I believe would help my mental health journey. I go to her appointment after appointment and tell her that I am still feeling the same way as the last and all she does is increase my dose of cymbalta. This drug does nothing for me, however she doesn’t “feel comfortable” putting me on anything else. Any time I try to advocate for myself, she shuts me down. I have severe anxiety and depression and I asked her for something to help me through panic attacks and she prescribed me 10 .5 mg ativan and refuses to give me more. She is more or less treating me like a drug abuse risk than a patient even when I voice that certain medications help me. Any time I try to ask to try something else, she says she “isn’t comfortable”. To make matters more irritating, she had me get tested for ADHD and the results came back that there’s a good chance I have it & she refuses to medicate me for it. Why would you have me get tested for it if you refuse to help? Please let me know your thoughts. All psychiatrists can’t be like this. She has not actually helped me at all the whole time I have been seeing her.",5.380966139124035,6.308102297202801,6.041365476628632,78.55937615016562,67.986013986014,9.657416267942583,31.486198012513803,9.811843763644266,2.9483384615384622,1171,47,226,26,19,382,148,286,0.111,0.721,0.16899999999999998,0.9409,2,0,4,0,1,0,23.0,0,3,0,0,6,13,1,2,12,0,24,6,0,3,5,46,43,17,0,5,8,0,3,2,0,3,6,4,0,1,12,13,0,3,7,0,0,5,7,4,0,0,7,9,53,9,31,31,10,24,0,1,2,0,37,9,0,7,10,163,65,4,0.0,0.11911568668555693,0.1962122700331521,0.0,0.12082165790185925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006697178264742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892793990408413,0.0,0.13673237285849302,0.0,0.07690780619241698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273045486248133,0.0,0.187970390190858,0.11437130112847435,0.0,0.07730400956442245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326675975898015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498347259396535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658930429380984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17595498111509875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331737455765492,0.0,0.16796557738724566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640138876325467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524981834007803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050491457489542,0.09644083605905353,0.057135470571110875,0.08432267943708792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686234523723986,0.2266169861619284,0.0,0.4043126728303891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05525054927825506,0.08194817136860585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280225343421834,0.0,0.09823112098685513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710685164950446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025537276712489,0.1013140614923811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646454678653968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795433033915928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778192178370119,0.0,0.11035552715671276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010638744130374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994822636005232,0.0,0.1017452081927064,0.1602242706527554,0.0,0.0,0.11357417114628734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15479110698907936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028613480253859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475157714552172,0.0,0.07558863510760093,0.0,0.08787065748171745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798123214214305,0.17586557145910414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20476681908813985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15959752996248253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071579234597613,0.11224199516024347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14283214222409854,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WorstSingedUK,2020/02/19,"My journey So it's been a long road fight g my depression but last year I finialy decided to get professional help. Along side with excellent university counciling I was taking anti depressents.

I will say that gp's are OK for the initial time, it wasn't until I had seen a psychiatrist that I really.became better. The initial dose for antidepressents/SSRI meds is about 20mg, which is good to see how you react to it but 60mg is a therapeutic dose and actually made me grow. 

I say this because I have been on daily meds for over a year now and after trying 3 different types (sertraline, metrazapine and fluoxetine) I have  finally found one that works for me. 

The last month has been perticularly had as my psychiatrist has been taking me off the other 2 and starting a 40mg dose of fluoxetine going up to 60mg. You all know how hard it is to change meds over. 

Now I have adjusted to the changes I finialy feel better. I am making my freinds laugh and that pesky negative voice  is visiting less and less frequesntly. 


While studying psychology I have been a little scetched out when we have been looking into  depression research as it does tend to feel a bit to real. But this is just the start of my journey. After seeing the dark place I have a burning conviction to dedicate my life to helping others with depression. There may be uncurtianty in this world but the dark place is real and fucking horrible.

Good luck to all of you with your journey to recovery ✌️",6.087156979043101,6.911415701067617,6.959543297746147,72.97121688414396,66.36654804270464,10.6572558323448,33.40470541716093,10.62613485830676,3.6757471727955715,1176,50,215,31,18,392,157,281,0.106,0.76,0.134,0.8903,1,0,0,0,1,0,20.0,1,4,0,4,9,14,2,0,16,1,30,5,0,5,2,36,48,19,0,0,5,0,3,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,15,14,0,0,6,0,0,6,2,6,0,1,13,10,27,8,37,32,5,37,0,4,4,1,11,14,1,2,17,151,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.11230616079553864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015462413837918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20356630154982625,0.12564279174047036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434889112808113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39648946845378735,0.0,0.0,0.12023911842708708,0.0,0.0,0.10071148149170003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163806626577898,0.0,0.0,0.12606976993103125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618453989302975,0.0,0.10639404047434334,0.06012705653893453,0.0,0.06540534232648937,0.1930553353054263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309337325062988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542778272357508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06324759476292842,0.18761893961204396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128779565895403,0.0,0.1153452005629153,0.0,0.1018464239329386,0.0966422447236557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088960176572765,0.07681999571747712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3834997967288483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185958707834756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779844369381288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24047823685417416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619833887541322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18304009965112,0.0,0.0,0.18341536643183376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629152234620435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730588898905295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710687068091559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813502287163486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378310294771539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14822167226812805
mentalhealth,TheSuperNexus2,2020/02/19,"When I get lonely I get depressed then I don't react well to people not wanting to hang out I go to a small sized University, and my friends are busy people and so am I. the problem is I get lonely really easily and then when people just want to curl up at night and not hang I react badly and push them away.",0.6256493506493506,2.7096934696969694,3.1053246753246766,89.59227272727274,84.0,5.58961038961039,17.004329004329005,6.868970318607317,-0.012785281385281344,243,5,52,3,7,84,44,66,0.179,0.6859999999999999,0.135,-0.4883,0,4,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,6,7,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,0,14,10,10,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,5,1,0,0,0,9,2,8,10,0,14,0,3,0,0,2,5,0,0,5,37,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473261778867053,0.0,0.21979754382261607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267314646724905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033814758992758,0.0,0.4126019986966859,0.0,0.14960749520961378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470364360507711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5475002329157436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251888726384058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16864069333773052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31053598000682264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366877544604552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kathyrosse,2020/02/19,TW? i relapsed and i feel like a failure. i have a doctors appointment later today but idk if i can bring myself to go,0.06946666666666701,2.2865740800000047,3.2360000000000007,86.70466666666668,88.2,4.933333333333334,24.333333333333336,6.42735559955562,1.013133333333334,92,4,18,1,3,33,21,25,0.174,0.7440000000000001,0.081,-0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,5,3,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,1,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,13,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5656896980015383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27945077385444045,0.3948335151479113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140998360027581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700107191200682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5238744415089658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,johnsandwichwomen,2020/02/19,"Looking up NSFW in first grade I don't know what made me so interested in sex and naked images at such a young age. I am hoping this sub would be able to shed light on what the cause might be. \[20M\]

   In first grade my dad would regularly let me use his work laptop for games. I remember one night I took his laptop into my room before dinner and just started googling for NSFW pictures of females my age... i was 7. SOOOO yeah totally almost got my dad fired or arrested if anyone would've looked at his search history.  In these searches real porn would pop up in the google images and I have this one picture of a girl with a monster cock in her mouth but all of the mans body was out of frame so she just had this huge meat stick in her mouth covered in excrement. I was so puzzled for the life of me i could not figure out what that was she was eating. I remember not being aroused by these images, i was just idk curious? 

  After many nights like these I ended up telling my dad what I had done in private, he wasn't mad just wanted to have a talk with me later (birds&bees). We had the talk and i couldn't wrap my mind around the idea of what the would even be like. I was a innocent kid so my mind never thought that way until naturally around 5th grade. After my dad finding out I wouldn't dare attempt looking up those types of images for another few years nor was I even that intrigued with them. 

   What brings me here is to ask if these are signs of sexual abuse? I have read things that say when a child is interested in sex at a very young age it is a potential sign of abuse. I have tried dusting off old memories but nothing of this caliber stands out in my head, but it was also nearly 14 years ago. I would love some help I've been so scared these last few months that might be what caused my habit at that age.",4.4460516934046375,4.876659411764706,4.874665775401073,87.86925356506241,69.85561497326202,8.051515151515153,25.476381461675572,7.937092434478242,1.1565493761140822,1436,37,313,17,24,456,196,374,0.069,0.8290000000000001,0.102,0.9152,0,0,0,0,2,0,30.0,1,0,1,4,17,8,1,1,15,1,41,13,6,4,3,61,56,19,0,12,12,4,1,2,0,8,1,1,1,4,26,15,2,0,7,2,0,2,8,2,0,4,19,6,43,6,53,21,5,59,0,0,3,6,26,31,1,9,26,216,69,8,0.09824470812776494,0.23280782807568465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708800600877642,0.0,0.09837788377127007,0.0,0.0,0.07856625759493821,0.0,0.1064481002102278,0.0,0.0,0.10301814258586547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869498422617598,0.0,0.0,0.17491723864279118,0.09184554003872177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359901055206069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912772304589613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018487559951603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844040519536194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053844624880873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052886323297563,0.0,0.0,0.08701565082691078,0.0,0.0,0.12977940630095786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979388337582077,0.1671337970902889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857526791466159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082741413806788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585135694847354,0.0,0.0,0.09757916275224793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090631708927308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05399272226593639,0.08008254967064891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004618703432636,0.06939314279183638,0.09599480371867118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247502433795922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866968481480644,0.09296151828815576,0.0,0.09960471392487154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084442196821432,0.19839829758187064,0.0,0.0784179887183931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577237550227231,0.0,0.0,0.18439200659771932,0.0,0.0942684471230212,0.0,0.10309129464134158,0.0,0.13314631364080873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982712945410481,0.11182398635324617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22258420529498535,0.0,0.0,0.0781281351570456,0.09836009176379792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953811007556966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793074989939154,0.0858702052144636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526941862330499,0.0,0.0,0.07799532421305623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915348562156224,0.06670170786673943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485188410119726,0.0,0.08106217322359026,0.057947274286371975,0.07798207639706861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715233176058394,0.0,0.0,0.41874133125349655,0.0,0.0,0.12653274190999675
mentalhealth,Joe-Van-Winkle,2020/02/19,"I feel useless without my job and never thought that would be me. I’ve been studying psychology and counselling for 5 years part time. I’ve been working retail jobs the whole time, just waiting and hoping that I’ll get a job which is in line with my passions.

9 months ago I got a job in the probation service delivering groups to service users. I was so happy when I got it, but standing in front of people brought out my social anxiety. I started getting anxious before work, then afterwards. I felt all of a sudden I was anxious all the time about work, study, just everything.

I was driving into work one day and just broke down in tears. Then the next week I had a panic attack going in to work. I took time off sick and started taking an SSRI.

I got back to work 2 weeks later and I’ve been working so hard on trying to be able to manage my anxieties and be good at the job. I thought I was getting somewhere.

Yesterday I had my probation review and was told I’m not being kept in the role and have been given a weeks notice.

I feel like shit, not because I have a mortgage to pay for. But I keep thinking about how I’m going to get a job I don’t care about now. Whilst still being very aware that my old job brought out anxieties and mental health struggles.

I’m so conflicted and still dealing with the shock of it all and likely grieving it. I never thought I’d care about a job so much, I think it made me increase my self worth.",3.781696020874104,4.865834534246577,4.704090019569474,86.10248858447487,71.8082191780822,7.068754076973256,28.28832354859752,7.2636822038024595,1.4798761904761903,1132,42,229,11,21,368,152,292,0.16899999999999998,0.7390000000000001,0.091,-0.9715,9,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,7,17,16,2,2,16,0,21,4,1,2,5,46,56,22,1,2,8,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,8,17,0,4,8,0,3,8,6,8,0,1,25,4,29,8,32,25,7,51,0,3,0,1,6,13,1,1,31,146,37,20,0.07500401741145651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648653595180566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721336040742222,0.16946638126035973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532789773705088,0.0,0.057673459667714026,0.0,0.045721752851903434,0.0,0.0638228945102363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529431890134032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048371386302843884,0.07732584853585901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740877456245574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584856964359686,0.053582885025255836,0.07201561891561087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567460136833172,0.0,0.08525302312638054,0.06290981126322646,0.17996269341398513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984317122853206,0.06718886731025446,0.0,0.0,0.07972576316240307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449591292537595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5954393117690059,0.06666701690173353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328634861595942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07097061479599197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558640841758253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059867491117758624,0.0,0.055136582870272566,0.0,0.11569544415743885,0.0,0.07976762341910952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539257094622345,0.07870409923955551,0.0,0.050824663317230526,0.0,0.0,0.08800105391400785,0.0,0.08122204176846783,0.0,0.051998341786583184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824554792853126,0.0,0.07699054603616805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645715027234293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617645913477584,0.0,0.1197966103828564,0.0,0.0,0.07841048411656873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056393686728277076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611909165555203,0.0,0.1786344353839555,0.1749417828758026,0.0,0.0,0.07166955286319933,0.08333222309983239,0.050922804429370985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188616942060416,0.0,0.0,0.18049109578464875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08373930689201009,0.0,0.0723011962600411,0.0,0.3822267257835344,0.0,0.0,0.053280701998709365,0.0,0.0,0.04830012810967185
mentalhealth,BananaGrams69,2020/02/19,"I found my high school billy's home address The title says it.  I have it, street number and all. Im half decided on mailing a 'dicksbymail' confetti launcher to him, but im not sure if thats good enough. I tried to kill myself three times cause of him. 

Should i post his address somewhere and let the reddit denizens have their way with him?

Should i prank him myself?",2.4952446183953043,4.720371753424658,3.0250880626223093,91.94863013698631,78.04109589041096,5.815264187866927,22.757338551859107,6.868970318607317,0.6200270058708415,290,9,59,3,7,90,55,73,0.128,0.804,0.068,-0.7471,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,3,0,5,0,0,1,2,13,6,4,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,14,2,5,2,2,6,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,1,1,39,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24225868676688345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436717242390928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25857148879460856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978000058960624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24916355232208914,0.2365531196079929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5094659865144979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26090698457680594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411484842649959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225856514504538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18753862840893865,0.0,0.23866891937925885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222636026649091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13751227745507752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601106538728634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18718802923671807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jonniegoy,2020/02/19,"Mental health is overlooked Now I’m not trying to be an overly emotional being but it’s very triggering to hear that the general population overlooks people that suffer from some sort of mental illness simply because it’s trendy right now. I think it’s unfair to those that have/are going through things and are open about it. I do believe it’s in a heightened trend right now but you can’t count it out for almost everyone. It sucks to hear that after going through it and still having episodes, people like my own family believes it’s fake. Not sure if it’s simply lack of knowledge/experience on their side. But I do believe people need to be more considerate. I don’t want to say my or anyone else’s issues/diagnosis should be compared. But you have to distinguish the authentic ones vs non authentic ones. And often times every mental issue is marked as disingenuous and misunderstood. Thoughts?",6.092142857142857,7.705169642857142,6.375952380952381,74.28571428571429,66.85714285714286,8.933333333333335,30.07142857142857,9.2995712137729,2.8075857142857146,732,27,121,14,12,235,107,168,0.166,0.773,0.06,-0.9626,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,1,0,6,5,1,0,4,0,14,2,0,1,1,30,24,11,0,5,9,0,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,16,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,3,0,2,1,3,9,2,20,18,4,16,0,1,0,0,6,8,1,6,7,86,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377547770716395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961909514136166,0.1409549766555069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386035657780049,0.0,0.0,0.4649770827942649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149206592024656,0.1547458171807081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590722292694634,0.13145240249968246,0.0,0.1345681910936439,0.1296871465116757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15636646612983274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14622866601139184,0.3100989362381389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358555999928438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720892074201718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159094588651479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020051486044596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18643967577249915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861176056264654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349651468046605,0.0,0.1093998308258465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098622191504622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12965649123370293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913942632975669,0.08814820952160095,0.0,0.1092138607553328,0.08021717988284761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933998429854788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135082517867637,0.08114134544495563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnytimeGrief,2020/02/19,"I was struggling with grief so set up [Untangle](https://l.linklyhq.com/l/1qb) \- it's a platform to support people grieving. You can be matched with 5-10 people who understand and have experienced something similar. Chat with them, a bereavement specialist, and experts.",7.489593495934957,11.706592146341467,5.782317073170731,65.77721544715448,78.75609756097559,8.5869918699187,38.540650406504064,8.841846274778883,5.058265040650406,222,13,27,6,6,65,36,41,0.21100000000000002,0.727,0.061,-0.765,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,1,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,6,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,1,5,4,0,3,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5670216913946785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31482569996678644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4275179149878605,0.0,0.0,0.4640657330067166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4257259775274607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whereareallthedogs,2020/02/19,"Mental illnesses becoming physical illness? Am I the only one who deals with this? 

I have GAD and CPTSD. Growing up, I've also had GERD (hyperacidity). 

Every time I get stressed out, my acidity acts out and leaves me completely helpless. I can't keep food down because of my need to throw up after meals. I'm sick again with fever today for the nth time this month.

My previous physician kept telling me to avoid stressful situations because once my anxiety kicks in, it just opens the floodgates to a variety of physical illnesses. 

I'm so pissed sometimes at myself because I can't control my anxiety all the time; when I don't, it always ends up making me extremely sick with a fever (like today). Add this on top of my anxiety also triggering my GERD, making it harder for me to actually eat to get better.

Life just sucks sometimes.",5.656363636363636,7.031303229299367,6.586554719166182,73.26155761436017,67.6624203821656,10.040301100173712,34.01795020266358,10.230975488527342,3.7931834394904445,665,31,114,17,11,221,98,157,0.22899999999999998,0.7340000000000001,0.037000000000000005,-0.9848,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,7,8,2,3,6,0,6,13,1,4,1,20,16,6,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,9,0,0,0,7,9,3,4,0,0,0,3,3,6,0,1,2,1,18,2,23,14,1,24,0,1,0,0,3,11,2,0,11,71,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.1380347618109439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262349724245548,0.117697702519084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3246265090571197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25867975801899595,0.15622037360609045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510099957170506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830759750580874,0.0,0.15864816391166198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458287032626806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14473862760932474,0.0,0.0,0.12528268475523746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917769652211475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17104185961097748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780353756113235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12572722846568646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497750895778679,0.0,0.0,0.09991029372242714,0.06910530817237663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18883790054019764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142548295719093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290401285728102,0.0,0.0,0.10488335702545144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063959670537094,0.09585015729736178,0.10757907265328716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589956876116582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797952652599672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32406091487323724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236335044042918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474418369758564,0.0,0.2681560557454037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goodluckfortune,2020/02/19,"Having trouble with communication I can’t help but to be in my head during conversations. What I’m noticing from my peers body language is that they sense an indecency coming from me. 

People often turn the other cheek on me. I know it’s because of me on the outside but more about how I’m coming off. Tone, speed of delivery.. all of that is F’d up for me.

Some days I REALLY feel like what I stated above has been my life story. I don’t get calls from people cause I’m not very well liked or at least befriended by other people. Other days, I’m just used to it. I suppose it’s just a hard day. Just wanted to vent. Thanks for reading",0.8418575063613218,3.1637501832061052,2.9488244274809183,89.47601017811708,85.33587786259542,5.325394402035624,17.89363867684478,6.742157984588678,0.06353394402035617,498,12,104,6,15,168,89,131,0.07200000000000001,0.847,0.081,0.4782,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,0,7,5,0,0,4,0,8,4,3,3,1,19,21,4,0,1,7,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,10,3,0,0,2,1,0,2,3,1,1,0,1,2,14,4,20,19,4,13,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,3,6,70,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696753161625364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131340836978826,0.0,0.0,0.19592970158787426,0.0,0.0,0.19711237646043706,0.0,0.3305731811319413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3712378443818367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097019683350413,0.1370782484779731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10024875014422076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17188571021824425,0.0,0.19692299925387452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861231071019685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054515668916211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552966644080064,0.18748457274905533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184552782632382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3990737870406291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19193071871390685,0.0,0.12292246850934675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766562134062597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087090280403792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16572167056341522,0.0,0.15832009988243467,0.11317508386591615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725220791517225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hume_mensch,2020/02/19,"Mental health stigma in Joker Wonder what your thoughts are on mental health in the film *Joker* and Hollywood's continued indifference to the mental health stigma.

[Link to my post on Medium](https://medium.com/@colinkerryward/joker-punches-down-when-it-should-be-punching-the-ruling-class-no-spoilers-6c17fbc4a654?source=friends_link&sk=e75e31556a46ae500da281763d7a3d4f): Joker punches down when it should punch up",11.59189655172414,16.816572241379312,6.565086206896553,60.907284482758655,67.9655172413793,7.037931034482759,26.21551724137931,8.07648339933343,2.7127172413793104,362,11,37,6,8,95,39,58,0.028999999999999998,0.898,0.073,0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,5,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,8,2,0,9,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,1,2,18,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249171368022512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6619561356957004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.627587430242565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198808054710279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479847898946695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22511595255356628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sabahatshaikh,2020/02/19,"Anybody else struggling with a lifetime of high functioning behaviour and mental illness? The past few weeks I've just been thinking about what it would be like if my high functioning habits did not exist. My mental illness definitely hinders every single thing I want to do, but being driven before facing mental health issues, has had this weird effect on me now. 

On one hand, it puts too much pressure on everything I do. ""I could do this so much better"" ""why am I not doing it the way I did it before"" ""I was so successful and look at me now"". And this crazy urge to just be perfect at what I'm doing. 

On the other hand, it helps me push when I feel a bit better. There's this sense of urgency and hard motivation to do it. It brings me back in the zone and makes me strive hard towards success.

I think being high functioning is the only way I've managed to somehow do alright in life. But there's obviously an up and down thing with motivation. Feels like being high functioning is a blessing and a curse. 

Does anybody else feel this way?",4.938423645320196,6.025675330049268,5.64332512315271,80.4288300492611,69.09852216748769,8.164532019704433,28.29310344827586,8.418075326091056,2.001518226600985,824,28,154,12,14,268,114,203,0.091,0.6679999999999999,0.24100000000000002,0.9915,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,9,14,12,0,2,10,1,23,7,3,4,2,31,34,13,0,4,7,0,7,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,17,9,0,0,8,0,0,4,2,3,0,1,6,8,15,9,20,21,5,28,1,0,1,0,1,15,0,2,8,114,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229007528407256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20426101618087994,0.0,0.0,0.2123007125768635,0.13103374189916892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582838821320032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503270493483978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005271895927101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112433146632012,0.0,0.10786869584414338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820613045305688,0.08574426645133278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21503359285332524,0.0,0.0,0.12757855566027915,0.0,0.0,0.08044870984931468,0.5072424403962731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527255331012846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477560780350653,0.11727409227797705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078886959017527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011610815152582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.362864064172822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764610416410503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133051200430552,0.09128269902256124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457528219562482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206560000009614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12547382320866293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15947554505120748,0.15381144561531346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079251926836799,0.28580538328574057,0.09627499901481247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083018507350173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526070790585583,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,highground28,2020/02/19,"If a Sociopath is found to out by society, what happens to that sociopath, is there any process or procedure for it? I have been studying sociopaths to a mild degree and I am aware that not all are violent, but even if they haven't done anything the potential damage must be enough to trigger something right?",13.209310344827585,8.320376827586209,11.182068965517242,66.54482758620689,56.58620689655172,14.358620689655172,51.41379310344828,11.20814326018867,5.734662068965517,248,13,44,4,2,76,48,58,0.081,0.883,0.036000000000000004,-0.5554,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,0,3,0,10,0,0,1,2,11,12,5,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,3,0,7,7,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,3,0,37,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570854107734412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3111010586177151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38687406895921217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3906243492814727,0.0,0.2496969510475069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4145098076871212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33430634684740945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32285068395295624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910396016131988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cerise-cake,2020/02/19,"I keep seeing things wrong with me that I think are new, but they're not Hey guys,

I'm not sure what's wrong with me but as stated above I keep thinking new things are wrong with my appearance that aren't new at all. I've noticed it happens mostly with my teeth.

For example, I just saw the lower part of my teeth where there is some slight overcrowding and when I looked at it tonight it looked so much worse, really bad, like one of my teeth had risen up further and pokes out worse. When this happens I feel my heart sink and panic and get scared, somewhat suicidal. I pulled up some old pictures of my teeth to realise they were always like that, no change at all, but it feels so real. 

Before this I thought I noticed that my front teeth had moved and one stuck out more than it did before and was now really badly aligned, but it turned out again this did not happen.

The time before that I had a chip I thought was new and it ruined my mood for like 3 days before I started to recover mentally. 

I don't know why my brain thinks new things are wrong with my teeth all the time... like I literally think WTF when did that happen omg its horrible and it'll be something that's been the same for like 20 yrs. 

Does this have a name or has any one else experienced it?",5.968957528957528,5.256606725868728,5.702992277992281,87.12545366795368,66.68339768339769,9.0988416988417,27.766409266409262,8.192908349453996,1.4390108108108108,998,24,222,11,14,309,137,259,0.242,0.6970000000000001,0.061,-0.9958,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,0,10,16,0,2,6,0,20,8,8,0,4,48,45,19,1,0,9,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,25,16,0,2,9,0,0,4,6,9,0,3,14,7,27,6,23,29,11,31,0,1,4,0,4,10,0,6,21,141,52,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170928938983556,0.0,0.0,0.058605866566484165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391465615415155,0.0,0.0,0.2933338894713203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620622082364112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116780836675012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05557945542981143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541735676314053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719929597528955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715115522073412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04502588589651579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533249371491393,0.3048374172104841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212460596407458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320282413781214,0.0,0.0,0.04736268743141685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105178111400781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474025286412545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684992800170295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159650054502072,0.06335276874233911,0.0,0.0,0.4161695361314951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962347145160734,0.09043220197249448,0.0,0.17519492362010974,0.0,0.0,0.10111454369258947,0.0,0.09332535607157973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809256304761667,0.11041919292275527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628196702119824,0.0,0.06867490141713264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06634615323518743,0.0,0.0,0.06099917977572537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942677548935689,0.0,0.08122433877310509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717639865161712,0.2208845840049711,0.0,0.13683578107509353,0.10050537897841652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937399106582335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776472404531865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756510976591313,0.0,0.3769004933542915,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maniwany,2020/02/19,"small things feel like big things i'm so burnt out lately. like i'm not getting sex, not getting a break, don't feel that unbreakable willpower i had 4 years ago while doing my studies. so swamped with school full-time, and the task of finding a job + just real world stuff.. and i feel defective that that's all it takes to shut me down. i do what i have to do, get through the day, but even small things are starting to take on an obligatory feel. literally putting cheese away in the fridge, wiping the crumbs off the table, opening a f\*cking door again and again, caring after my body, washing it, even walking from point a to b in my house--i don't even want to reach out to my friends anymore, i want everyone to leave me alone. i do things with this panicked urgency that sits in my chest and tenses my shoulders. i find it hard to take my time, do things at a peaceful pace. honestly, i don't wanna do anything.

at the same time i demand productivity, optimize myself and the time i have--i guess healthy people would call this basic time management lol. it's like, because everything feels like such a big expenditure of energy, it's work.. and because i don't have too much going on, maybe this is my way of convincing myself i *am* doing *something*.. that i'm not wasting away--because that's how i really feel. my mental health days: yoga, writing, reading, going for a swim, furniture shopping, go out into the city, that's all work for me. I HATE MENTAL ILLNESS. i'm so bitter at those who are healthy. i wouldn't wish this upon anyone. i just want what others have. wonder who i could've been without this.",3.975754716981133,5.411637345911949,4.605801886792452,85.6409669811321,71.76729559748428,7.3125786163522015,27.400943396226417,7.793537801064563,1.5683245283018872,1268,45,251,16,24,405,171,318,0.114,0.7290000000000001,0.157,0.9521,2,1,1,0,0,0,60.0,0,0,0,2,13,11,2,0,16,1,22,7,3,1,2,43,50,12,0,7,7,0,7,4,1,2,3,0,1,0,29,13,0,0,9,4,1,6,9,3,0,0,2,8,31,8,36,46,4,47,0,0,0,1,5,24,0,2,18,162,60,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867285421949961,0.0,0.0,0.10360359359381284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992054483849657,0.06994511185942939,0.0,0.08231829713215029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18796781982113844,0.0,0.0,0.1829368127211048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111365526016856,0.0,0.0,0.10214445732819713,0.0,0.10198989095387333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986788231327575,0.0,0.0,0.1290254883826802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982117441256776,0.0,0.0,0.09558542525996347,0.08990284054240033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.303476894794437,0.14292660264173926,0.0,0.0,0.18285594757065612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728492985142929,0.0,0.1567886966344236,0.0,0.1705524761495383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019717417459694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960955102991333,0.09876147148364138,0.0,0.1063299640029768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992669089560574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284111711299905,0.1059200678175254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19548347989773435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049618059529096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20161864289173648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735354625568255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935000169417282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456312966676532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056038078223628,0.0,0.0,0.10005965889173876,0.11385898580736176,0.06408343777167619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012383202014525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700997389487413,0.0,0.0,0.0708035811132144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451338142006813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256361723724683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322860350019128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333192275363852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770054376269102,0.07940121273868972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11503254019169665,0.09642784578985032,0.1084810752891946,0.1456498318429388,0.0,0.0,0.07106028090362325,0.0,0.0,0.06441770739502288
mentalhealth,ymippsmol,2020/02/19,Inner voice is really loud. Sometimes my inner monologue or inner voice has a sensation of being really loud. Like it’s amplified or the volume of it has been turned up. It makes me anxious and uncomfortable. I’m scared that I have mild schizophrenia because of this. It reminded me that a couple years ago I used to hear screaming in my head when I was upset and it wouldn’t stop. Sometimes my voice will talk in my head really loud but it’ll be scary or sad things. It’s only my voice.,2.798888888888889,4.973388453608251,4.0628178694158095,85.13060710194733,76.83505154639175,7.197709049255441,22.117983963344788,8.167268648758528,1.2659104238258878,388,11,75,7,9,127,62,97,0.191,0.79,0.019,-0.9326,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,3,0,11,2,2,2,0,10,16,7,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,9,0,0,11,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,9,10,1,7,9,0,10,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,3,5,48,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18426451715956815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23483431999190665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671583189492805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300045811079965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4266698856493872,0.0,0.2342849844592126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015549498013876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875506829463033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580947630785838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3995011942333455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081144769212024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4111781695157829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737889148193961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707830795854486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380998194710876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22610324204228585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795332350635183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386168579041846
mentalhealth,AswinManohar,2020/02/19,"Data for depression - A new approach Hi folks, hope you are doing alright. I am working on a new project to find markers from data that can reduce the risk of depression . Perhaps, help people to find what can help them fight depression! It would be great if you can help this initiative by filling the below survey (of course, anonymously). Please share this to your friends and family who you think might be suffering from depression.

The link to survey (3-6 mins) : [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdXlbJv2wxpk50qJoltCoUFpOuQ-5I5Nhjzo4MGp3zqWJ-itg/viewform?usp=sf\_link](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdXlbJv2wxpk50qJoltCoUFpOuQ-5I5Nhjzo4MGp3zqWJ-itg/viewform?usp=sf_link)",18.512509803921574,23.131289682352943,12.285588235294115,32.213480392156896,40.411764705882355,9.901960784313726,32.990196078431374,10.125756701596842,3.5987254901960792,593,16,62,9,6,161,62,85,0.2,0.575,0.22399999999999998,0.1906,0,0,0,0,1,0,48.0,0,4,1,1,0,12,1,1,5,1,10,0,0,0,0,9,12,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,6,5,12,8,0,7,0,5,0,0,13,2,0,3,3,41,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6194830632992787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950960554894814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286876002756921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389213666157938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19824202548540787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615701372392161,0.0,0.0,0.1785926815733644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19075082784845804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3473247536616971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12465815817757298,0.0,0.0,0.19737824599872195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152154907233416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090439317133842,0.0,0.0,0.12773242279200914,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rat_genius,2020/02/19,"I feel like shit My sister suffering from psychosis came completely uncalled today to visit from her mental hospital (with permission). I dont wanna see her and be reminded of the state shes in. She has delusions about a hacker stalker boy following her on every device, and now apparently in real life too. She told me that he is now a patient at her hospital because he wanted to see her. The way she talked about him appearing before her was like it was just something funny that happened.",6.458949275362323,7.514603228260871,7.1921739130434785,70.8086231884058,65.6304347826087,10.046376811594204,33.811594202898554,10.125756701596842,3.739059420289856,395,17,63,9,6,131,69,92,0.07,0.847,0.083,0.0516,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,4,0,7,2,1,0,0,10,16,2,0,2,1,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,2,0,0,4,3,15,2,13,11,0,13,0,1,2,0,18,4,1,1,5,47,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416458474279515,0.0,0.19772312770880174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26576046796709923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24362735789134896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27232678134536337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19577518489652976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748931584233875,0.16599961033035687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20547713624962133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16412430175595147,0.2270408789494975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341664570258924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644790672595489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3703251970718287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385164709795183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17888378261034554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18676394388698006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202522071104928,0.22203205076088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370532526454509,0.18443830792534496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iguessthrowaway1800,2020/02/19,"I was told by a military therapist that I have “muted emotions” can anyone give me more insight? Ok, this will be long as its kinda my life story so I apologize and thank you in advance for reading this!

I am a 25 year old male. 195 lbs. I recently got out of the military and moved back home.

Ive always thought of myself as different. Let me explain.

Ever since I can remember I would see the ""sad"" moments on the tv shows my parents would watch and I after they went to bed I would play their cds until I found a sad sounding song like the song played during the sad tv scene and I would pretend I was in that moment and make myself cry. I would then feel so accomplished because I pretended to feel what I never felt. I never felt sad or hurt like that but pretending I was like that made me feel normal.

Even before that time I got to admit to three things that I've not told anyone, not even my wife. 1. I have a memory of my dog having puppies when I was around five... I would take them individually and ""stress"" them out in different ways because their reactions were fascinating. Please don't lecture me on this as I feel horrible and wish I could take it back every day. 2. Again I'm ashamed to say this and that's why I am on a throw away, but, while I was being babysat I would approach the youngest child, sometimes baby, there and do the same. If it ended with the child crying, it was very easy for me to draw a innocent and blank face when the sitter came. 3. When I was around 4 I had sexual experiences with my step father. While my mother was at work he would take me to his bedroom and preform oral sex on me and have me preform oral on him. I always thought to myself that he was sleep walking but I cannot say for sure. I don't think about it a lot and I honestly have made an effort to block it out. This happened before the other two so maybe I should of said it first but oh well, again I've never told a single soul any of this.

Growing up I struggled to meet norms in family settings. I was scolded for being ""bored"" and not crying at funerals. I was told I upset my parents because I have never, even as an adult, shown ""excitement"" during Christmas or for any gift/special event. I recently tried to open up about this to my father and I got cold feet and didn't saw much but he stated that he has always seen it.

My wife is the only relationship I've had for more then 6 months. We have struggled. During down times she has presented me with divorce papers. As much as I don't want that to happen... as much as I tell myself I care about her.. it doesn't hurt or upset me. Honestly I don't care. Ive made her cry and I don't feel anything. The only thing that makes me prevent a divorce is I don't want to loose her for her income and her help around the house. Sad right ? She's told me I'm cold, heartless and insane. But idk what to think. I feel numb all the time, like no matter how hard I try I can't connect with anyone.

The only real feeling I know Is strong anger and or a itching desire to go crazy. Im sure that sounds silly but I mean Im constantly bombarded with ""intrusive thoughts"" like what would happen if I just stabbed everyone here? would it be exciting. What would happen if I strangled my sleeping wife??? Don't get me wrong I don't want to but I think about it. I truly don't think I know what love really feels like.

Ive always been rebellious, doing stupid things causing me to have 8 large scars over my body and face due to injuries from my risky behavior.

Since around 17, when I started drinking, I've struggled with drinking too much and relying on alcohol to make me feel normal around people.

I can make friends easy because I've learned to just replicate their behavior. I prefer my showers and food scalding hot.

When I was in the military I had a pre deployment screening in which my answers made the medical staff forward me to a therapist. We only had one meeting before I got out. I only told her a fraction of what I've said here and she said I suffer from ""muted emotions"", possibly on the sociopathic spectrum.  Is it possible to be semi emotionless??? She asked me to keep talking to her after I got out but I panicked and didn't continue communication. I struggle with over thinking.

I can't talk to anyone about this in my life. Can you please help. Thank you again. Also if you have any other question I will happily answer them.",2.6898755334281645,4.48448120945946,4.009184447605502,87.12958036984354,75.86936936936938,6.8808914177335225,24.634660976766238,7.716178576656502,1.2409423423423425,3446,115,702,49,76,1132,368,888,0.129,0.725,0.145,0.9149,6,0,3,0,2,0,99.0,2,4,7,6,36,46,3,8,33,1,80,17,7,10,8,146,156,65,1,25,22,8,13,6,1,14,6,9,4,4,44,46,4,3,32,13,0,11,23,22,1,5,48,29,135,24,97,87,10,90,1,8,5,2,71,35,0,11,49,481,179,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048652648962997834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03640652734327374,0.15152262549259002,0.0,0.0,0.09287619686704908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273292580369597,0.0,0.037463403153059856,0.20263562967103174,0.0425599648899771,0.0,0.04277247257955443,0.07001221691513594,0.0,0.1110070835649794,0.0,0.11621590833150415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05056829171452843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05206875988880951,0.09283205643109156,0.046766974012117386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049196623954659666,0.0,0.03634820906559768,0.0,0.200029405201558,0.02936002114172089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512839695846373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891948300595097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024195612808616,0.04032186040291663,0.0,0.0,0.09020699818328996,0.04118019653996772,0.03835698805221351,0.04350132894904239,0.0,0.04453243178158224,0.04291715566690146,0.0,0.2071704163001144,0.03252324891675513,0.08742276190550859,0.0,0.0,0.03872375584645889,0.05504931507305346,0.04991608869888834,0.035172696539530736,0.0,0.023785065032093662,0.043671969744445205,0.025873049675640504,0.0,0.1820535130099216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610313189446407,0.0,0.04078168345986339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102923317785064,0.0,0.04566553936552002,0.0,0.0,0.05253002813403331,0.09747144705868416,0.0,0.0983501680346692,0.0,0.0,0.0404649354772634,0.0,0.0,0.05003897550134147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04655265430186517,0.06431166324637197,0.13344803049220813,0.0,0.0,0.0402884151656836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03870394100395397,0.04108831709119992,0.1723083756835597,0.12155383609854176,0.0,0.045736234350669806,0.0495903452951561,0.0,0.04586190159667821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0363378215772956,0.048386137858180564,0.1338651928326705,0.0,0.14044752264061058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921016149584997,0.0,0.0,0.047771093496189375,0.0,0.03084908876029057,0.1731200268527024,0.0,0.0,0.10110080894342664,0.0,0.0,0.03156147737073961,0.0,0.0,0.09994611079831732,0.0,0.10264576201259493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05099870085655638,0.0,0.04553757148791667,0.051817703189996615,0.029164641985003813,0.0,0.08990138770923256,0.04887708298483057,0.051571235568020915,0.038878316213103295,0.12991481865688706,0.07240701481642729,0.0,0.0,0.03627773143727352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531791731608327,0.0,0.09111625900117264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04502563801713942,0.0,0.032223007476289825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05214902201804015,0.19037151070939465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581402193161994,0.0,0.10268797079138846,0.07318294571442541,0.03979107659971207,0.08382707052499908,0.0,0.10571665218351348,0.09073486302631373,0.1458537153277794,0.0,0.10842589390918403,0.07963842112638503,0.0,0.0,0.2610079736942543,0.0,0.06181731510780166,0.0,0.04447155584117125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03756310044937112,0.08055591892839134,0.03613582577997265,0.0,0.0,0.04093266864866034,0.0422023644315351,0.0410794586667722,0.0,0.05235179272481534,0.0,0.0,0.033142925446743014,0.0,0.0,0.3557381589329089,0.04977471606923847,0.0,0.029316769496110544
mentalhealth,Curvy_n_Curly,2020/02/19,"How do I know whether I really need mental help or not? Hello everyone,

Recently I have been struggling a lot. I just graduated and have started with a new job. However, this is not where I want to be. I know what I want. I know what I need to do to get it. But I simply cannot put my words into action.

On weekdays I work, eat, netflix and sleep. Weekends are boring. Everyone around me seems to enjoy what they have but I simply cannot find happiness in anything even though I am in a better position than them.

My parents are unhappy with me, everyone has lost faith in me. I was always a bright student. But I don't know what changed in last 2-3 years that I could not even do well in my exams. I was am avid reader, a great dancer a good painter but I don't want to do those things too. I used to love to try new food joints around the city but now I don't even eat 2 meals a day properly. I am gaining weight. I have become very obsessed with how I look.

I once read a book ""Life is what you make it"". In that book, the female character experenced something similar. She was the brightest students during her MBA but she later had a breakdown and could not even read comics. I fear is this something which is going to happen to me too ?

I want to get out of this slumber but I don't know how. I know only crying over these problems won't help and I have to start taking actions. Nobody is going to help myself but me. I know what is wrong and what I need to do. I know everything. Yet, I can't. I am always there for my friends and give them the best advise. But I cannot seem to get my own life on track.",0.6370243982855257,2.743387584569735,2.486946092977252,93.90557904714808,84.13353115727003,5.524859874711506,20.04360369271348,6.816661863887847,0.2394656116056706,1244,36,278,15,36,412,166,337,0.113,0.7140000000000001,0.17300000000000001,0.9836,3,0,2,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,3,5,18,18,0,3,13,0,40,9,1,5,0,57,72,21,0,10,16,1,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,18,13,5,0,11,7,0,5,13,7,1,0,6,3,53,11,33,62,3,31,1,1,2,1,16,14,0,4,12,197,71,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504429769518606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439292816860107,0.16095342733202905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984161781756684,0.0,0.0,0.09487104735252304,0.07995299140256835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563305263219317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443568644859455,0.0,0.09930206495103276,0.058301642669807925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850070948831214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388379830751,0.0,0.0,0.25914820603908306,0.08124725354664633,0.0,0.0,0.1017270891428506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262555134605935,0.0,0.10931414119610937,0.0,0.06984415901756115,0.0,0.14169353172659074,0.08672158519358847,0.10275478274938103,0.07582468928491409,0.0,0.09966823599035986,0.0,0.0,0.0799419589178813,0.09623433178958707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817831394588812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970977637732068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974594507490858,0.07368948274618563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277068429887114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759146921930404,0.0,0.0986841767408683,0.07685632539001605,0.0815910986368755,0.0,0.060343862519322077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110368982740877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20109523116292716,0.0,0.17462112500356655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627490125182807,0.0,0.06875459588965548,0.0,0.0,0.10038043242878084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650225485142986,0.0,0.09087871645510873,0.0,0.0,0.1808524052570718,0.0,0.05791366863787301,0.0,0.08926081075424461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645966952014137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046702568867206,0.0,0.0,0.13919135005988098,0.0,0.0,0.12797363180093976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945075255422661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797085681771743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06005889819038057,0.0,0.0888192492133874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06137684640663588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807807662432849,0.0,0.07459090200917251,0.21328515069889845,0.0,0.0,0.11008496328625024,0.08128201984448459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581354240519588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884010969379683,0.0,0.05821575574298714
mentalhealth,GloomyKoala,2020/02/19,"i just need some help aha Hey, so I'm not gonna go into too many specifics for personal reasons. I hope you understand and I appreciate it. Thank you :) 

I know this is mental health-related but I'm not exactly sure what happened? I have a past of mental health issues, but I'm poorly educated about mental health. If that makes sense?? hah I'm not sure. 

To put it simply, I had a short amount of time to do something that needed a lot of time. I almost immediately got extremely overwhelmed and started crying. This is not typical of me because I'm good at keeping it together when it is necessary hah. (in this situation it was necessary :/) This just continued to escalate to a point where I would start hyperventilating, I was able to calm myself down, but I would just start hyperventilating again. This happened 3 times in about 10-15 minutes?? (i can't remember clearly) For the most part, I could almost calm myself all the way down and almost stop crying. But almost as soon as I got calmed down it would start again and it would escalate again. During this time I was still trying in vain to get this task done, I was basically running around in circles doing nothing. It felt like my brain turned off. I started shaking and getting very weak so I couldn't move the things I needed to move, I was able to move one little thing. I inevitably dropped it and that was my breaking point. After that, I stopped trying to calm myself down, but I was still trying to do the task. My mom tried to hug me, but idk it was like my brain was off I couldn't hug her back, I couldn't speak. I was just hysterical and just stood there. Someone made a comment right after my mom hugged me and I started screaming and crying and I couldn't stop, I couldn't think. I sat to the floor and just couldn't stop screaming and crying. My hands were just grabbing at everything and it felt as if I had gone brain dead and my body was just?? I don't even know what I was thinking at this moment, idk if I even was or if I cant remember. It felt like whole minutes I was just sitting on the floor like this. It was the scariest, most weird experience ever and I never want to experience it again. Idk what happened but I would like to avoid something like this happening again. 

Im sorry this is kinda long",2.2084195844555623,4.564411413716816,3.4359792227779917,87.9296633320508,79.77433628318585,6.2313197383609085,22.879184301654487,7.423996415210882,0.9478332435552136,1797,59,363,26,46,582,191,452,0.179,0.7390000000000001,0.083,-0.9915,0,1,2,0,0,0,55.0,0,2,0,0,30,26,0,3,12,2,42,11,5,3,7,94,84,33,1,21,25,2,5,6,0,6,3,3,0,1,34,17,0,6,11,0,1,8,14,8,0,1,28,8,53,18,43,43,8,68,0,1,0,3,10,24,0,15,38,251,87,0,0.1293399724073556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590305984913222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057569998554547426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049727227550610285,0.0,0.03942222334465141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183377586749035,0.0,0.21657927675552965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05163372173896608,0.0,0.2841477727045286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661798488259968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542783194072663,0.058497704947809474,0.0,0.0,0.058121213655083125,0.12651931140926473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18627998509092528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757479727234765,0.0,0.036753443479966987,0.05424211618093145,0.10344499136550196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287498208960121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20622351368885836,0.0,0.0,0.04334692856752171,0.0,0.0,0.06423188820254543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06985468252532133,0.06749866380674409,0.0,0.05748165514420728,0.0,0.0,0.07108186630258455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18956693191162688,0.06481631559105258,0.0,0.057230902744469014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05498010964977534,0.0,0.0611923046007704,0.04316771796162766,0.06556521565482977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955164066506645,0.0,0.0,0.15148141247541974,0.0,0.20620188249306248,0.0,0.1438559260188219,0.049877480138464575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205259592160186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043822056324009914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003129301443314,0.0617348193928768,0.0,0.0564673375154004,0.0,0.0,0.12226808029860405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06501119810474036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649151658837335,0.0,0.0,0.14651697541676809,0.055227814867139464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269177405913915,0.0,0.0,0.0547946694483388,0.09957222973851214,0.0,0.07239275494526433,0.2746424945373326,0.0,0.10329106903976763,0.2162680167862768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190139331823327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595394346096831,0.0,0.0,0.08592773050741682,0.08287583179944602,0.0,0.0,0.15083835607046925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756267023316534,0.07034237453558116,0.0,0.06732373634758708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335951140688664,0.03814403340449583,0.05133202490839652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220173009805544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22969851363271734,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thefleet,2020/02/19,I Need Useful Information on Self-Harm I have a good friend who self-harms and I am trying to help her do some research. All I can find is essentially the same article over and over again. If you do self-harm or used to would you mind sharing your feelings on it? Or if you have a good article on it?  I think she is feeling alone and I know she isn't.,0.4018999999999977,2.4458771066666682,2.3835833333333305,94.671375,84.6,5.883333333333333,20.041666666666664,7.1686216300943375,0.2739666666666665,273,8,65,4,8,91,48,75,0.026000000000000002,0.721,0.253,0.9456,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,4,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,10,0,0,2,1,21,17,7,0,4,4,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,13,4,7,16,3,6,0,0,0,0,12,5,0,5,1,47,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21682283365470773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117066856967628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19134155161802252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16174282095744735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3511846750157113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14032248457210686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115052950892055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21138320713229927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15522992152287576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6551912198337014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134142637245488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14213449512342485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616213165363013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487158015602196,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sad-little-prick,2020/02/19,"Opinions on Taking a Mental Health Day What are your opinions on taking a mental health day from work/ school? What if you live in a place where mental health issues, like anxiety,  aren't treated seriously? Are you comfortable faking or somewhat exaggerating an illness to take a day off? Do you feel guilt for lying? Do you feel like a rat bastard? 

A little background on my question:

I had trouble sleeping at night last week (4.5-6.5 hours a night), possibly as a result of high stress incurred over the two weeks preceeding it. My meditation, journaling, and exercise routines broke down. I had difficulty ""eating my frog"" in the morning (I wake up at 4:30 and start on my M.I.T.s. by 5:40-6:00). I had some diarrhea on Wednesday evening of that week and had a gum graft procedure on Friday evening.

Now, as it so happens, I monitor my emotions with respect to depressive and anxiety and record them when I am regular with journaling. I had noticed that relapse was about to occur. So, I had decide to take Sunday completely off (usually I plan the upcoming week on Sundays) and made another Reddit account to ask for support on r/depression_help.

Unfortunately, I received no responses to that post. I tried to cope by helping other posters the best I could with their issues, complimenting them, offering them long pieces of tailored advice (unlike the usual platitudes), following up with them, etc.  I also spent time with and helped three of my friends who were going through some shut of their own. But after a while, my plans for the week slowly broke down and I achieved few of my weekly goals. 

This week, I decided to use the excuse of the gum graft to take some time off of college and my project (it's a team thing. I hold my own and do good work on it.). I felt that my teammates could handle the next task in 2-3 days without me. (I didn't tell them about the stress.). I used the excuse of the my mouth hurting. Which wasn't exactly a lie; the anchors of the palate stent have cut my upper lip and the hole in its middle has cut my tongue. The injuries ain't big but they hurt like bitches. The graft itself only hurts while eating, drinking, and brushing. The soft/ liquid meals I've been eating have tended to be high in protein (milk and eggs) and high fiber giving me crazy smelly flatulence and a little bit of bloating. I've been sleeping better this week, except for last night, and have been finishing off all my backlogged work so that I can get to studying for my midterms in a couple of weeks and program the implementation of the next part of our system. Now, it turns out that my pals did absolutely nothing over the past four days and now wanted me to go help with this task (it's modifying a survey paper which for which I helped on the first draft, staying up till midnights and 1:00 A.M. while having a lot of other shot to do and suffering from high chronic anxiety. I also wrote out a plan to off myself if I failed as a backup but shelved it to revisit in a few months.) I tried, subtly, to ask if I could handle the programming part instead, which has a later deadline. My homeboy couldn't take a hint so I said that my mouth's still hurting and that I'm having trouble sleeping. He accepted that excuse. 

Now, I feel like a lying sack of shut, which I am. I am struggling more with mental health than physical, but I doubt that they'd accept that. I just need a week to finish all my other shit and do a lot more coding to feel better and to build momentum. Do you think that I'm in the wrong here?",6.002446270543616,6.5361856415929225,6.160581542351454,79.64646017699118,66.47787610619469,8.935018963337546,31.334597555836496,8.841846274778883,2.475516392751791,2787,103,522,42,42,888,323,678,0.129,0.797,0.075,-0.9895,0,0,1,0,0,0,102.0,1,6,9,14,20,40,5,5,49,0,41,22,8,4,3,78,75,45,0,9,11,0,6,4,2,0,7,1,0,0,36,32,7,1,11,3,2,4,7,24,0,4,19,8,71,16,97,50,20,103,0,9,0,0,37,47,3,14,53,369,107,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054706634807766594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954030749303281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05870380266842305,0.12848215786380093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046744257481426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05875145114955189,0.09902608645594578,0.061119713148656114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05869785622402625,0.0,0.0,0.1340953142495737,0.061944911790255026,0.0,0.18052431204464595,0.0,0.04821868855878205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05484272390918418,0.0,0.1718559392038347,0.0,0.06297414007603906,0.0,0.0,0.062436636789768026,0.07395342671380901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322818633937493,0.0799895491602478,0.05375314232185115,0.0,0.0,0.04761971628169668,0.0,0.0,0.04325287652147596,0.0,0.029249178542002912,0.05370467722550463,0.0636336666196036,0.04695648095777144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04950621106470246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23803226902812197,0.0,0.0,0.1500988065487204,0.2365994590744504,0.0,0.0,0.055132678627603036,0.0,0.2397268835649581,0.0,0.0,0.11686489926551268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126839360613707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094032540918294,0.1122207724585092,0.04943464279812216,0.04954382284704181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519069879996443,0.0,0.05297314131631069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22567365415710625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04468566429007607,0.0,0.0,0.041511212604816376,0.0,0.0,0.11907862430086705,0.15761076200619026,0.0,0.05371788093690389,0.06373782643845496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042578135210297616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12124980765541632,0.05344278718005023,0.0,0.0,0.058491062843390326,0.0,0.0,0.06311322284877632,0.053616920153651465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627145691950337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05325332964222069,0.0,0.0,0.056658504721850224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746647520128542,0.0,0.0,0.16807242637398542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03962555904566863,0.05967118743765256,0.04470866420748867,0.0,0.12825830442240607,0.05852633047814465,0.0,0.0,0.0635296522118956,0.0,0.0,0.25255670209356723,0.0,0.04893223130872578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037193090216624605,0.03587210171492364,0.0,0.0,0.0652891046036887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07601853028930683,0.06089420182993537,0.05468795124520087,0.0,0.0,0.0967039035123124,0.12331629748301665,0.0,0.03302064344680678,0.0,0.449067563658564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396629996557067,0.0,0.1222704258939014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06120939989956821,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I-Dont-Know-My-Guy,2020/02/19,"How can I fix all I’m feeling I’m an exchange student and I’ve been away from my home country for 8 months now. The first 3 months were literally the best months of my life with new people and everyone being so incredibly interested in me and nice to me.

However. 3 months and 25 days into my stay I was contacted by my mom who said my grandma’s cancer had gotten worse and that the doctors didn’t know how much time she had left. She’s had cancer for almost all my life, but because they caught it so early they had been able to keep it in check for 15+ years, I didn’t even know she had cancer until about 4 years ago.

3 months and 28 days into my stay I talked to my parents again and they basically told me that she had decided to stop her treatment and “let things go as they go” as she put it herself. She died exactly 2 months after that phone call.

I it’s been almost 4 months since she died and I still can’t get over it. I really have tried making myself talk to someone about it, but I don’t want to feel like I’m trying to make someone feel bad for me. There is literally 2 people in the whole US that are aware my grandma died and they don’t even know it’s recent. 

I feel angry with her because she pulled out of the treatment and dooming the little chance I ever had of seeing her again. I feel angry with my parents for not telling me about it earlier. I feel angry with God for taking her in the way he took her and taking her while I was literally on the other side of the world. But most importantly I am so incredibly angry and disappointed in myself for not spending more time with her while I was still at home and not being able to swallow my pride and call her more than once a week after she stopped treatment because I was angry with my parents.

Normally I would just pray it all away, but this event alone has made me agnostic. I really cannot comprehend how and all-mighty and merciful god could allow this to happen. But she’s gone now and I have to accept it.

Does anyone have any tips on how to get over something like this? When my grandpa died it felt so much easier. I was very sad for a couple days, a little sad for a gone and then I felt like I moved on, but now it’s like I have this sadness constantly hanging over me and it doesn’t get any better with time. Maybe I’ll feel better when I get to go home again, idk.",3.5562094165568467,4.328557572301431,4.750001797052835,86.72873337726129,72.05498981670061,7.650197675811667,24.217143884030193,7.827709963407826,1.0366522822570985,1852,48,402,23,34,612,208,491,0.17,0.725,0.105,-0.993,4,1,1,0,0,0,30.0,1,0,5,5,26,17,0,0,14,0,37,7,0,8,5,77,75,42,4,4,10,5,9,4,0,1,6,1,3,0,24,30,1,3,14,0,3,11,10,6,0,1,28,11,71,11,60,42,10,78,3,5,1,0,41,22,0,3,46,272,95,2,0.1401221564385123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062104918597804835,0.0,0.14031209906960812,0.07256214771948627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528787137167344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04898833489211135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164937851331213,0.0,0.05849807385988664,0.12812574899712295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352477916607876,0.12392666046360234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14308038832000572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571113590099046,0.0,0.05593807003625555,0.07752125046660177,0.0,0.13555079832909409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908493518954139,0.0,0.0,0.07171048229948597,0.0613109216829456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254936280410617,0.06337425632174279,0.0,0.06694636264004639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24797490373261866,0.05005164827870195,0.1345392442694431,0.0,0.0,0.05959391734258089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641608682078494,0.0,0.11945197593055328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06195478008902418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21083092165519107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062273505433368785,0.0,0.0,0.11551120900145327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612156648117002,0.07164219926246614,0.0989724229969976,0.13691321558469305,0.14043921216270408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662934862170623,0.09353262748908356,0.0,0.07038576992019666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205468804940169,0.3914545894905447,0.07446383846340722,0.10300590764426494,0.0,0.0,0.06766542592236924,0.0,0.0,0.0686449812794713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461276175727229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333836085786184,0.0,0.0,0.09714306024959564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043073461000278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976584144738722,0.0,0.0691768625100611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664412921199031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582960850237168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05795524789417425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118725048436767,0.0539364408877739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493515749172967,0.11190173513496428,0.11714839703742695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535442322422987,0.11262488161232607,0.06123647043065403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04654546723825436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255953437774385,0.0,0.0,0.06694636264004639,0.07784043578297822,0.09513374636183408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427485070472993,0.0,0.0,0.057807726920569076,0.041323839153661696,0.055611222815684584,0.05619877092839565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822069180645355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139822419078623,0.04976937981642395,0.0,0.0,0.09023407466104418
mentalhealth,Flowers71,2020/02/19,"Is something wrong with me? For context I’m 21 M. Diagnosed with depression and medicated for it so it really doesn’t affect me. 

I have always felt like I’ve been kind of an outlier as far as human relationships go and my personal life but I could never figure out what was causing it. 

I live a fairly normal life. I am a college student (close to graduation), have a gorgeous girlfriend who for the most part I’m happy with, have parents who have been together since I was born, not rich/not poor, have a fairly large social circle - the “average” life that people live as far as normal circumstances go. I objectively have no reason to be unhappy for dissatisfied with my life at all. In fact I feel like I have every reason to be happy with life. 

With all of these things that many people would be happy with, I still find myself unhappy with my life. And it isn’t like I’m dissatisfied with myself as a person to drag myself down. I’m insecure about a few insignificant things, but who isn’t insecure about something? It all isn’t major in my mind. 

For instance, when I’m with my girlfriend (who I really have no reason to dislike or not want to be with at all) I always find my brain telling me I would be happy with someone else. This has happened with different people, also, so it isn’t like it’s just my current girlfriend not being the “one” for me. Ever since I started dating seriously, which was about 6 years ago, I haven’t found myself relatively happy with one of my girlfriends. Obviously these girls have become more and more serious with every one that I’ve dated so it isn’t to say that I’m not learning what I want and don’t want in a forever partner and I would say I have a fairly firm grasp on what I want and don’t want by now - at least for the most part at least. When I’m single I feel as if I want a certain girl because of X and Y quality about them while keeping in mind of all of the qualities that I didn’t like about my exes but then when I finally get around to being exclusive and dating said person I get the feeling that I don’t want to be with them no matter how smart, funny, pretty, easygoing, or any combination of the qualities they have are. I always find myself thinking about what’s next on the list and it honestly breaks my heart knowing that I’m going to hurt them. I do love my girlfriend as I have loved each of my past partners but no matter how in love with them I am I can’t bring myself to just be happy with them, which is what hurts me because I truly care about them as individuals and partners but I’m always thinking of being with other partners as well. It feels as if something has been missing the whole time. 

Or in life, I always find myself thinking that there’s much more to what I should be experiencing than what I’m feeling. Throughout my whole life I have always had friends and a caring support system to carry me through life so it isn’t as if I was ever alone in my life. Even still, I feel like I’m unable to unlock the next level of happiness no matter how hard I try. I went to college strictly to find this next level of satisfaction of accomplishing something on my own but now that I see the light at the end of the tunnel I feel as if it’s not significant at all. Even in school, I’ve always has mentors who have guided me along and made me feel as if what I was doing was great. They all preached about “finding your purpose” and “doing what you love” and I feel as if what I do in school and life makes me happy, but it doesn’t mean I necessarily am passionate or love what I’m doing. I just feel as if it’s something I’m doing to pass the time or to get the obstacle over with. And then after that, what’s next? The next unexciting challenge that I’ll inevitably overcome just like the others in my life? It’s all a cycle to me that’s repetitive and melancholic to me. 

I try everything in the books to make my life as exciting as possible. I have traveled to different countries, I’m engaged in classes and extracurriculars, I’ve taken up different hobbies such as music and skiing, I go out with friends fairly often as well as spending time with my girlfriend on a pretty regular basis. I really feel as if I live an extremely satisfying life all-around, but I always feel as if I’m falling short of true happiness - which pretty sums up my whole point. I’ve begun to think something is wrong with me because most people would be extremely happy with the life I live. Is something wrong with me? Or is it just part of growing up? I feel like nothing is going to change for me and I really just want an outsiders opinion on this.",4.8453883495145655,5.4420214595469245,6.003353290183393,79.5396577669903,69.03236245954693,8.682696871628911,28.718608414239483,8.745826893841286,2.124744854368932,3651,123,713,58,60,1223,304,927,0.095,0.6940000000000001,0.21,0.9993,5,1,7,1,0,0,71.0,0,2,8,2,39,53,0,2,34,0,76,25,2,11,15,169,148,80,0,25,34,1,15,8,12,5,17,3,0,10,57,52,0,1,33,3,2,11,25,12,2,3,17,21,103,41,138,113,28,86,1,5,1,6,45,38,0,20,43,526,160,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03387269954679418,0.0,0.0,0.039576186293546346,0.0,0.030558183152811964,0.2543640648798633,0.0,0.0,0.025985521841907302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803369765413013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988118007356849,0.04220223546956341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042657314002925766,0.0,0.0,0.07791951580895776,0.03925432777177842,0.04042330937817455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03050923312268197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0329120048305019,0.03878445250448775,0.0,0.11977045832526535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0319212860030004,0.0,0.033844557148680926,0.0,0.0,0.05047743126132274,0.06913002035441979,0.06439064374571911,0.0,0.03434254973408093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511752572122415,0.08189614360236266,0.036689585151092025,0.04185946116683776,0.20955086966321426,0.0,0.0,0.04189756870657567,0.05904510983423045,0.0,0.059892697265443474,0.0,0.10858401616490586,0.0,0.0,0.04212894838890631,0.0,0.0,0.03379081236759562,0.40677465161483706,0.03423051423433141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04528149371983324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181363477225974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033964648644507114,0.0,0.03979199663647465,0.021000357487152246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4048547872640662,0.1493479202676127,0.0,0.1349678517765999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17243945121089332,0.03615718998172012,0.051013714538093516,0.03874104716419333,0.0,0.04162415271998037,0.0,0.03849464618015695,0.0,0.0,0.07716660689083776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02809027239673689,0.0,0.02947150849999578,0.0,0.20319488020821908,0.0,0.0748794420401037,0.03666551724492532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776804743456378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04242998799996056,0.1241398628164998,0.03647775006740511,0.10596576783878063,0.10009593184763983,0.0,0.0,0.03612276279590538,0.04307837391170923,0.0,0.11662625550904505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791853674597638,0.11786513417709595,0.0,0.041025468860094116,0.0,0.0,0.03634843449316216,0.0607755526762029,0.0,0.07734532136108557,0.0304500770198711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321884782725498,0.0,0.0,0.03895239904296489,0.03237696776016176,0.20592265937141035,0.0,0.0,0.027046703875666867,0.0,0.061032426071412064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043362610700808886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03339903845034597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05077281035458179,0.09793902075810776,0.0,0.0,0.06684530594842526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05188698222348577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18030777843370469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687144903278023,0.03542297702883851,0.0,0.1279872537501098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857904895227403,0.12533671852424158,0.0,0.024607323935729127
mentalhealth,sadmonad,2020/02/19,I feel better when I’m sleep deprived I feel more confident and carefree maybe it’s because I don’t have hw energy so be anxious!,3.6366666666666654,4.873632851851851,5.408333333333335,80.33250000000002,72.33333333333334,8.362962962962964,32.01851851851852,8.841846274778883,2.7951629629629617,105,5,20,2,2,36,23,27,0.16699999999999998,0.467,0.366,0.7484,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,3,6,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,5,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4833214744760354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26079868867985223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37837722855504863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4326432445703795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4298086053878508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42813485593484013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,r_734,2020/02/19,"How do I know I have problems? The question written above is not exactly that I want to know. I want to know how a psychiatrist or therapist derive that I have problems.
They solely depend on my answers to their questions or they make observations about me while sessions doing different activities, questions; listening to the answer which I don't directly give through my answers.or they see through me and know this person did this in that scenario means he/she should have x,y or z problem and from there they narrow it down to the core issue.

The reason I am asking this question is because I think I might have some problems.but I am not sure that they are legit mental difficulties or I am using them as an excuse consciously or unconsciously for my recent failures.i am saying that because I overthink pretty much everything and my mind can manipulate and project something else than what I am feeling.


Little background:
       This issues are coming out as I am horribly failing at my college.not as per grades but as per studies,skills, knowledge perspective.i am in last year of my graduation at age 21 and don't know what I am good at,what I am interested in,I just want to be shut in one room and watch movies and YouTube videos only.i have bunked three days in row in college.when I am out of college my family depends on me so there is so much pressure from that point of view.i was ace student once never saw anything less then 1st rank and suddenly i am good at nothing and can't trust my self on doing anything.till 10th grade I aced my classes like nobody's business and from the end of 10th grade through 11th and 12th and through college I am till suffering.i don't know what the problem is.i can't afford therapy sessions for too long.and I haven't gone for them also.
        So before I go I want to know that I have issues and they can be solved within given time as I have left with few months to finish my college.

I can write all the things here but it will be too long to read.so ask me if any missing piece of info you want to find out.
I might have multiple points of failure.",7.460244233378559,7.240262233830847,7.093577566711893,76.75086838534601,63.47761194029851,9.796653098145637,35.43690637720488,9.218907990703514,3.1125134328358217,1686,69,307,25,22,530,217,402,0.084,0.853,0.062,-0.39799999999999996,2,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,9,4,13,13,0,1,9,0,46,0,0,8,4,76,75,35,0,11,11,0,1,1,0,4,0,2,1,2,18,18,0,0,21,1,0,3,9,7,0,2,6,6,51,6,51,62,7,41,0,2,3,0,23,23,0,15,16,222,69,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192007676807517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06115810996952197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740079053779682,0.0,0.16815204115858934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964569480242484,0.0,0.07652709242735645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774700586295498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05799990080116772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396174410659168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512820145068784,0.0,0.07965470774693795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082675599315722,0.0,0.08478164097134767,0.0,0.045473262722888284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219792037171808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627275507543976,0.05111148617254969,0.1508645127449158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816027584221677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34597708919936915,0.07330810065805315,0.0,0.0,0.09771340395985836,0.0,0.0,0.04393714212771629,0.09013735597028948,0.0,0.15917727523195824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060031551081706665,0.0,0.0,0.0979643404863748,0.0,0.0,0.09063217999767327,0.19081123042275486,0.09080756312912924,0.0,0.07178435044853458,0.0,0.13222347265259826,0.0,0.06936253844645315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629396590135817,0.0,0.0,0.09577662766507164,0.060941512244374274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07852677918987948,0.0,0.0,0.17003313713809076,0.0,0.0,0.09149506923060018,0.0,0.3442182395357053,0.0,0.0,0.4029860300700483,0.0,0.0899581991537504,0.0,0.0,0.09246698836670622,0.08879883879942567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151901656320317,0.0,0.0,0.0716656440571602,0.0,0.09382063167623153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923548056420746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476160039800734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10284720875179253,0.10442014517084816,0.0597480615940419,0.057625987254293375,0.0,0.0,0.05244115802909823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767398123933415,0.0,0.0,0.26522660890017274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057914458384666086
mentalhealth,Sollicitus87,2020/02/19,"Anyone ever feel like there is something else up?   

By this I mean, for example, me; I’ve been diagnosed with all types of anxiety and depression as well. Yet, I feel like there is more than I can understand and recognize with my issues of the previous. For the most part I can overcome them but there is this nagging side of my brain that I can’t take. Its something that even nagged when on medication. It sucks as an adult I am open the therapy but I can’t afford it like many of us :/ 

Just left pondering in my already too full skull…",3.7453504672897218,5.0668518878504685,4.734661214953274,84.93974883177572,72.17757009345793,9.088317757009348,27.393691588785053,9.516144504307137,2.298589719626168,420,15,88,10,8,137,74,107,0.156,0.7709999999999999,0.073,-0.8882,1,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,1,0,10,8,3,0,4,0,9,3,1,0,2,16,15,7,0,0,3,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,2,13,4,15,14,5,10,0,1,0,0,3,7,1,1,6,67,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21344584704177447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796720373572772,0.0,0.0,0.13524507116720175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159227791739247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665939761397117,0.1963191300074284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615791558770157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12775332317874022,0.17496115810588206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19559982174099505,0.2763612500158219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20188218325426385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101534313990849,0.0,0.0,0.2834884716881453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19609942086899748,0.0,0.2106931237030442,0.0,0.1948521884422048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20945704007343988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297811215769541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14542917715126247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22119476912181174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20135899160313955,0.2326626982988536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739094932240835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZagrimaDark,2020/02/19,"What’s wrong with me? Can a therapist really help my issues? I’ve hit a point where my mental health is starting to worry me. I need to know if something is wrong with me. I know I need to see a therapist or something but I can’t get up the willpower to do so 

My memory is in shambles, I can’t remember much of anything past a few days ago. Except for very important or sad events. I even forget my name sometimes. 

Ive started calling everything by the wrong name multiple times before I get it right. Like I’ll call a microwave a fridge, then a toaster, then eventually get to the word microwave. That happens for most things. Stairs turns into elevators and what not

I feel like the magic is gone from everything and I can’t feel real excitement, even the day before a major event. I know I should and want to feel excited but I just feel neutral. I don’t enjoy things I used to love

Today is the first time in 3 years that I’ve looked at myself through a mirror in detail instead of trying to focus on shaving or brushing teeth. I didn’t even recognize myself. I used to look so young, but now I look old and tired after such a short time. I don’t hate how I look, it’s just that I see the disappointment of a person that everyone in my family tells me I am and I begin to hate myself. (Not exaggerating. My family disowned me because they disapprove of me being an online merchant instead of working outside the home. Now only my brother talks to me)

I’ve been depressed for years but recently I became worried because I’m only 28 and can’t even remember my name from time to time or what I look like. What’s wrong with me? Could a therapist and medicine really make me feel anything but disappointment? Maybe even feel like things are exciting and enjoyable?

Sorry for the length, thank you in advance",2.499212097095107,4.784910994428969,4.088837246319142,84.01675766016714,78.33147632311976,7.111213688818146,25.020374054914445,8.146662555663855,1.714311834460804,1433,53,274,27,35,477,176,359,0.16899999999999998,0.73,0.10099999999999999,-0.9765,1,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,1,3,16,21,2,0,22,0,21,4,1,4,0,54,58,23,0,6,15,1,6,4,0,1,2,0,2,1,13,12,0,0,11,0,1,2,9,10,0,1,3,14,47,11,39,51,4,42,0,4,7,1,13,14,0,6,30,183,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763948566736415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255844830538336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302923674516086,0.0,0.12985930750262173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15583119813305735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060923069732693534,0.0,0.0,0.09842039876805724,0.0,0.06572110014265581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25199257322322977,0.0,0.0,0.07291238179698112,0.13715543382127365,0.0,0.14386650317240374,0.0,0.2314916019846636,0.10902414246123417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649047130076757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195981215689422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747596735444991,0.0,0.0,0.1506701277116791,0.0,0.08110829565029512,0.0,0.0,0.05114541162010165,0.0,0.07653980514214068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964225051897743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580515266869485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911442913542305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203835233386389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886794347497613,0.0,0.05093395949401015,0.0,0.07665829668878771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689715993798524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609271190643151,0.11315789135651776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006891495047341,0.0,0.0,0.11606627934860578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284144121590852,0.0,0.0666262943132785,0.0,0.0,0.07213257664993168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685141925795928,0.09776545051641117,0.0,0.07534165579645226,0.0,0.17287663197059033,0.06516377094304728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160988499368867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748612518127245,0.07546726937018339,0.08541683049633385,0.10801767580527864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133080307969985,0.0666936445217496,0.07025108794033456,0.0,0.2657868078696711,0.1520802958231695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224693324380065,0.08770099287021497,0.07232790473913636,0.0,0.0,0.05180586190923192,0.08299756912080904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13180547038666576,0.0,0.06295934371685884,0.045006471134048924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055550708275430835,0.1549821918537098,0.0,0.0,0.33370871093413235,0.0,0.09827541099070523
mentalhealth,ccaitgames,2020/02/19,"Any Vets With Advice? So, I am a person who has experienced MTS. I have PTSD, Anxiety, Depression, and BPD. I’ve heard a lot of bad about the VA Healthcare when it comes to mental health. A doctor really suggested it (I haven’t slept more that 3-4 hrs in 7 years) but I just don’t want another bad experience, which made me quit therapy to begin with and kind of recluse into myself. 
I’ve got a kid, a daughter. A supportive husband. They need me to get better. If it’s not good, I might try the local vet center because I’ve heard good things. But she strongly recommended meds to help even me out.",2.2093388429752068,4.154158694214882,4.205785123966944,84.5014049586777,77.7603305785124,7.705785123966942,23.396694214876035,8.575989854853784,1.576844628099173,466,15,96,10,11,159,90,121,0.136,0.731,0.133,-0.1073,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,3,5,9,0,0,8,0,6,3,1,1,0,17,17,7,0,3,5,2,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,2,7,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,5,3,11,6,12,11,2,9,0,1,0,0,11,5,0,3,3,56,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17162344116055314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943430975081705,0.18416319443824586,0.13435634232058735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2932871507206248,0.10706231669358696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533031580128456,0.0,0.0,0.22119962775954552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512895506971457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15126971870571573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976457721319922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600184897899077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17179967841401594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175933943181044,0.0,0.0,0.2946199441833927,0.1404672223724457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866863007631992,0.0,0.0,0.11772097563898412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18289144550561595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14931420431848888,0.0,0.16618519552035804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19508515270650828,0.0,0.17699356413447587,0.18631549936388556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302272965430967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335319672520914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20530187741461675,0.0,0.0,0.1868039472051056,0.0,0.0,0.1125129689449342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993026543608705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20084802151652464,0.0,0.11668065770819094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924112866805675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359102652887177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11309985487144833
mentalhealth,Dadadadada10,2020/02/19,"Okay so I need some advice Whenever I think about my problems, I cant cry but I get extremely nauseous, so that's something. I just suppress that shit down immediately after. Infact, it takes a long time to dig them back up! Just... help?",2.112391304347824,4.630414152173916,3.6458260869565247,85.31004347826091,81.3913043478261,6.288695652173913,24.417391304347824,7.554174236665415,1.3397617391304353,185,7,36,3,5,61,39,46,0.14400000000000002,0.705,0.151,-0.3105,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,6,3,1,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,8,5,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,7,1,5,5,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,4,24,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33156846475836155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609073910437431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3727145956999932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17727475394334244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274314213637029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002774588014278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515930486677073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32467253284195824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3482954311578236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612163593379798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551178611511261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21741526845998652,0.0,0.0,0.1978535899252556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,7bubbly,2020/02/19,"Afraid I might be developing something.... Title says it all. I’m really afraid I might be developing schizophrenia /develop it in the future. My grandfather (on dads side) has it, and so do my two uncles (moms side) and my mother has a personality disorder. 

Ever since I was young I remember being very scared and paranoid of having my thoughts read and influenced, and I’ve never felt safe (even in my own mind). I’m also highly paranoid of other people and institutions in general. I know no ones probably gives a shit about me but I always feel like I’m being attacked and everyone is looking at me and can see right through me and wants to hurt me. Everyone hates me and I don’t know why. They all want to kill me and I don’t know why. They don’t but that’s what comes to my head. It literally feels like the world is out to get me, with no logical basis behind it. It’s gotten to the point where this belief is so strong I completely mishear what people are saying as it warps into scary thoughts of mine.
For example, I was at work and my coworker tapped me on the shoulder and I heard her say “they’re angry with you, you know?” My heart skipped a beat and I asked her to repeat it again only for her to ask me something completely unrelated to what I heard. I was with my friend in the mall and all of a sudden she says “that girl over there told me she hates you.” And it was a girl we never met, but that’s what I heard even though she told me she said something else.
It’s very scary that I’m hearing these negative thoughts coming from other people and I feel crazy. I find myself engaging in really reckless fucking behavior and wanting to get into arguments for the sake of it even though I’m a very non confrontational person. I have crazy thoughts all the time and my entire life feels like a perpetual Kenya tower just falling and falling and falling and falling and crashing and breaking and collapsing. I should note that I have c-ptsd, depression, autism, and a myriad of other shit. I’ve never received therapy and have no coping skills so this dysfunctional life is sadly normal to me. I’m afraid I’m slipping and I don’t know how to stop. Shame keeps me from ever bringing this up to my family or doctor. I don’t want to be institutionalized. I don’t know what to do.",3.8438420390182486,5.37288622246696,5.08956198867212,81.67648898678415,72.23788546255507,8.272271869100065,26.187287602265574,8.841846274778883,1.9427215355569536,1811,60,355,35,35,601,208,454,0.218,0.73,0.052000000000000005,-0.9977,1,0,3,0,0,1,45.0,1,3,2,4,17,23,8,5,15,0,32,9,5,2,9,85,81,40,1,6,5,3,5,3,1,3,3,9,0,4,28,37,0,3,19,2,0,8,13,16,0,2,17,16,62,7,46,56,5,42,1,3,2,1,37,21,3,3,15,245,90,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331537555817884,0.0658790650929599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803390256608273,0.09007179285214954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640268690095156,0.1660247508787432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819240318690445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09074020077540892,0.08103788803821385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613967203066605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688093275411458,0.1432347328765148,0.0,0.15130819557264724,0.0,0.0,0.0746381494537332,0.0,0.16013090288765894,0.1696856473115611,0.07601940374853111,0.0,0.0723635517689937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061169593842234166,0.0731950367610421,0.08273023740952598,0.0759508628676126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15633575936548538,0.0812553096982832,0.0,0.08923479069031001,0.09382150654603744,0.0,0.0836516203014292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475734610073893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703734405240866,0.08759424002591143,0.0,0.26107157899523953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184579822242982,0.11604117152462368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648617369619887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798208869957326,0.07994311493276966,0.09272756799190628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831914829110104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775736563042326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053650314463355636,0.06021535321657631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16466773450189073,0.13826327054168044,0.0,0.0,0.07484496971513499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536290421288327,0.0,0.09255010533153707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791953710272658,0.0,0.1014417136185063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968864613756752,0.0676141168008725,0.07531255275805389,0.2518491968718745,0.07926693138509669,0.0,0.0630913838249968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16254183445404286,0.06549350582332768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18285591385045635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619296355676077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090542306680639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15557599880010112,0.25142107543377423,0.04616696428210755,0.0,0.0,0.15130819557264724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734144026402172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19598039024622327,0.1867953773707975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428843420680663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057639575232515415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlackfurTheWolf,2020/02/19,"I talked to my friend on the phone after a month and a half and I feel so happy. It was a 10 minute conversation. I was awkward and nervous. But I did it.

Backstory: I have huge anxiety, and even talking to my friends through text or on the phone is a problem for me. I had been texting my friend for more than a month since we last hung out and my brain freaked out humongously whenever I got a text from them, even if they laughed at my jokes I always thought I was being weird, awkward, or said something offensive when texting them. When they didn't respond right away I wouldn't sleep at night thinking I had said something dumb. I always thought: ""why are they still my friend"" because I have self esteem issues.

Well I finally called them today and we had a small conversation. I felt a lot of anxiety being lifted off my chest afterwards even if the conversation was painfully awkward. We're going to see each other again later this week.

This may not seem like much but it's a lot for me. So yay. I hope that everyone else who has extreme social anxiety like me is able to have these small moments of victory in the huge war we have against our anxious thoughts.",4.751359170305676,5.882452310043671,5.038163209606989,84.43357669213977,69.56768558951964,8.170414847161572,31.343067685589517,8.472884824447931,2.282460480349344,925,39,184,14,16,292,132,229,0.142,0.7290000000000001,0.129,0.4133,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,4,0,6,0,10,23,3,4,13,1,22,4,3,0,0,32,35,16,1,5,7,0,2,2,4,2,1,2,0,1,9,12,0,0,7,1,0,1,3,11,1,1,17,5,36,12,23,14,5,30,0,0,1,0,28,14,1,9,17,132,45,0,0.11911007873593628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19821825443553004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733566526431073,0.13456048563561646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119078398364404,0.0,0.0,0.0726083984576458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296623993741832,0.12162470769455108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950118691239647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23601325095353756,0.0,0.0,0.11381478458247353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06022563466631733,0.0,0.11436435454116588,0.13047926920056527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3680966054642363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676930026384742,0.0,0.09526321087789616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679489365731852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830318375308307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243199764303422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709061158022622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638233597581756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20252625904913907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901450569411765,0.0,0.08755961285222452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177674015565978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267415216599985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397225918278887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017193564340762,0.22660192162290574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949153115186612,0.10843334221949437,0.12425778906451315,0.0,0.0,0.09852908797995788,0.0,0.11919609861031172,0.12141772538537456,0.0,0.18339351560573605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512146273927978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19147233895670526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632092899980271,0.0,0.2836802933742916,0.0,0.0,0.11290242746571898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554292055277366,0.0,0.10709426532900436,0.0,0.10747831967157008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wint3rwish3r,2020/02/19,"My Friends Keep Forgetting About Plans/What They Say and It’s Making Me Feel Negative Around 2-4 months ago, two of my closest friends started becoming more distant. It started off as not inviting me to play video games with them, and they would start talking about it the next day (which made me feel left out). Then one of them started to forget details about me or about plans.

An example would be when we arrived to school together. One of his friends came up to talk to him, so he said he would meet me later in the cafeteria. I go to the cafeteria, sitting at a table. Ten minutes go by. Another ten minutes go by. He doesn’t come in. I’m kicked out of the cafeteria as school starts in 5 minutes. As I walk out, I see him in the yard talking with his friends. This makes me extremely pissed off as he said he would meet me in the cafeteria. I walk towards him, but even when I’m less than five feet away, he doesn’t acknowledge me. Later I ask him what happened and he says he forgot about going to the cafeteria. 

I’m extremely sensitive of friends forgetting about plans we made together or not listening to me then asking what I was talking about. Especially if it’s close friends, so this event made me feel horrible inside. I kept thinking, “Am I so worthless that I’m that easily forgettable?”. 

Just today, something else made me snap. My other close friend (female) hung out with me today. We made plans to have a fun girls night playing video games, as we hadn’t played together in a while. I decided to finish my homework before we played (without procrastinating for once) and I managed to finish in 10 minutes. When I texted her that I finished my homework, she said that she was playing a game with our other close friend because I was slow. I got a little pissed, but she said she would play with me after one match with him. So I waited. Twenty five minutes go by. Nothing. I check their Discord and realize that they switched to a different game. Of course, this makes me angry again. I text my female friend. Ten minutes go by. I finally get a response. She claims that our other friend proposed to play a quick round on this other game. I get even more mad. She didn’t have to do it, but she still accepted it, knowing that I was waiting. He also knew that me and her had plans to play yet still proposed to play with her. Maybe I would’ve been fine if they simply invited me to play with them. I’m not sure anymore. 

Yeah, maybe I am overreacting, but I’m overly sensitive of these things because of people who betrayed my trust before. Sure, I wouldn’t be angry if they only forgot every now and again. But it happens every other time we plan something, and it’s getting on my nerves. Is it my fault? Am I such a bad friend that they feel the need to make excuses to avoid me? Am I so boring and worthless that they’ve decided they don’t want to be my friend anymore? Should I just forget about all the times they forget? I guess I’m asking for advice about what to do or how I should react to dealing with negative thoughts because of people forgetting about me or if I’m overreacting/in the wrong. 

(Sorry if it’s hard to read, I’m not good at putting my thoughts into words. Also sorry if formatting is bad, I’m on mobile.)

TLDR: My closest friends keep forgetting about plans we make and I feel as if I’m not worth remembering about because of this.",2.9291465863453823,5.0273402078313305,3.813650602409641,87.43155020080324,76.13855421686749,6.836305220883535,26.12690763052209,7.793537801064563,1.5088557028112448,2654,100,525,40,60,849,255,664,0.131,0.7340000000000001,0.135,-0.4978,1,1,2,0,0,0,83.0,9,0,12,6,36,41,3,1,20,1,32,8,3,12,3,119,101,46,0,17,24,0,7,0,13,8,0,7,3,1,37,37,5,8,16,19,2,11,14,11,0,9,25,15,97,30,93,65,4,79,0,2,2,0,85,31,2,12,36,351,134,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487890978674885,0.04978245853718321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982227611796524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05888866500562252,0.0,0.0,0.11139127446291633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0499943136790604,0.15750607913822548,0.0,0.052764176133358216,0.0,0.09378252164838426,0.13693847832572514,0.06202431650118721,0.0955760607525701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423208788570113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04837687409273751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036218559119291865,0.05789850220771451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05867525524815809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04691448033843919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741863111724776,0.0,0.09463445770023304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198093716764262,0.0,0.0,0.061520543617969624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5640580766984457,0.0,0.08802385868826312,0.0,0.19150216031866965,0.04710435016593067,0.04491628866339525,0.0,0.06186658028038591,0.0,0.09932421909884498,0.0,0.050308336163845634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983519090583956,0.0,0.0,0.03086407165233236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061018012947982925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05628708171860973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656997870216097,0.18743620694535806,0.0,0.11284055278622518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04482638253939687,0.0,0.0,0.04164193428609237,0.0,0.0,0.05972680556481327,0.05270236306773345,0.0,0.053887042261520086,0.0,0.0,0.05980857559094242,0.114166424436237,0.042712216704694654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786855660127248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645631947724264,0.0,0.0,0.05617520563499901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361834125592909,0.0,0.21368411225064265,0.08932138482194912,0.0,0.11367385254854215,0.04475225526685946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646943568278809,0.0,0.12573306200088533,0.19875171336695105,0.0,0.0896989097702822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586028571273744,0.0,0.0,0.18055714831317615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037310213831664524,0.03598506544575269,0.0,0.08916954634003993,0.06549470451241812,0.0,0.106466241818119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486016738835161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03312462773821437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054136243578899984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23936674998427804,0.0614021525358484,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,morningcalls4,2020/02/19,"I (34M) have always been ready to get off of the ride. first i would like to start by saying that this isnt a cry for help, a threat or anything of the sort. I do have a diagnoses as BPD, but i have always kind of questioned it. i am currently taking medications, and doing therapy. Since as far back as i couldnt remember i have always had this feeling that something was not right. It has always been something on my mind, and it was on occasion something that i have had a hard time coping with. I have am pretty consistently in a depressed state. At the same time though im not sure if i would even label it as such. i suppose the best way i could describe it really is that like the comedian Bill Hicks used to say that life was just a ride, its all great and there are highs and lows and such but eventually it ends, and thats okay. I know that i have pretty much just got on the ride, i havent been on for long, and im not afraid of speed or heights or anything but im just ready to get off, not because im having the worst time or anything like that, im not really even all that depressed. im just tired, i am not sure if i ever even wanted to get on the ride. but i feel like im ready to get off, i think at this point im only still on is because of my family, i dont want to ruin their time at the theme park. im not really asking for advice or anything, i guess im just asking if anyone else has ever really felt like that.",2.846178187403993,3.286490941935486,4.555529953917052,88.69424731182798,73.45161290322581,7.711213517665131,22.826420890937023,7.793537801064563,0.7704485407066053,1112,25,260,14,21,378,132,310,0.10400000000000001,0.7240000000000001,0.172,0.9759,1,0,3,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,2,16,18,1,1,15,1,33,4,0,1,6,56,51,24,0,9,24,0,4,5,0,2,4,2,0,0,20,8,0,0,7,0,1,4,11,7,0,1,10,6,24,11,34,37,6,39,0,4,0,0,7,19,0,11,19,175,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06390744851257786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21766985872080785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045728717935404485,0.06700932129629357,0.21527223792531228,0.0,0.12227905257907375,0.0,0.0,0.050288032282655576,0.0,0.0797336243285318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863254068857805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236814112601365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052216027186315836,0.0,0.0718380707644873,0.0,0.0,0.11265665918741223,0.0663789226768569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664750387205703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05463273137847749,0.0,0.057924376829731075,0.0,0.0,0.1295868817369795,0.118314839566824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06165264877336887,0.0,0.06613571200351805,0.046721279900195235,0.06279359327061514,0.0,0.0,0.05562861940146338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667376019574692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05230580228882625,0.07210296979803768,0.0720447127918839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058584935736473776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04383577871778505,0.0690979613443413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7064247702835994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810331711101685,0.035941750258424665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04619346651178026,0.15975399630570644,0.0,0.0,0.05787633106732608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588292414260423,0.0,0.0,0.06603465952561324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048076017553144335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04973912201463671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061823486569170936,0.0,0.0,0.13306921883419626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326219417267317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16758588969484753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740846690298247,0.05585065312785872,0.0,0.10401631198146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409898478210793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15104275113015556,0.0,0.0,0.046289967997330865,0.0,0.05222797318727748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327615080187145,0.0,0.0491721418321144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478981022127792,0.0,0.0,0.041905236932229965,0.06425448970659695,0.0,0.15253945359842128,0.07516688584588123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05648400560914255,0.0,0.0,0.0771484145696129,0.05191092793380241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291558639245576,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,360Bowscopez,2020/02/19,"Is self harm a drug? So on the 26th I’ll be 3 months clean. Even though it has felt like forever since I cut myself, I still feel compelled to do it. It almost feels like I am addicted to the high I get when I hurt myself. Almost like it is a drug. It’s weird because I feel like I am going through withdraw and need so do it just to satisfy that need to cut. Anyone have any ideas of how to deal with this without hurting myself again?",1.5005645161290315,3.0238346881720446,3.027620967741939,94.06143145161293,78.46236559139786,5.940322580645162,21.302419354838708,6.6274283507984215,0.2054741935483868,338,9,78,3,8,111,61,93,0.128,0.6779999999999999,0.195,0.6925,0,0,2,0,0,4,8.0,0,0,0,0,9,10,2,0,4,0,9,3,0,2,0,15,17,6,0,2,2,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,1,1,8,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,1,4,10,4,10,15,0,7,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,2,8,51,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874658998617166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283755136818038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150215810610886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11464848535002553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995184288401654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690412239610293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38029583341433343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082976619737019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487176401750277,0.23427396244690255,0.1574325868556171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566520285824186,0.0,0.09318536846691204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323854607281527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3510569037293721,0.18509708406323086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3204210313691282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13087569248372227,0.0,0.0,0.2431566714652555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17105176912745496,0.0,0.0,0.13563395048608404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309430548059852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16109526473508787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805688448379818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kurahappy,2020/02/19,"my son is the only reason I'm still here... I want to vent but I cant find the words. The suicidal feeling is so heavy right now I'm struggling to breathe. there's no voice in my head telling me to die, it's just a feeling I have. I have no idea how to explain it but it's driving me crazy and I'm in my car tempted to drive off a fucking bridge right now. I'm in therapy, I go to church, I take meds, I do everything I can to make myself better and nothing is helping in the least fucking bit. I genuinely think I have something worse than just depression and anxiety. something is fucking wrong with my brain and oh god I just want it to be fucking over

sorry.. I want to scream to everyone at the top of my lungs that something is wrong but the people in my life are not the kind of people you can do that to. my whole family and my boyfriend..  they don't believe in being suicidal. they say if I really wanted to die I would've already done it. I've tried to vent to them and they just say I'm attention seeking blah blah blah

I've been to the psychiatric hospital 3 times already and if I go back again I legally have to stay for a minimum of 6 months and i can't be away from my breastfed son for that long obviously
i dont know what to do i feel like I'm suffocating and I really really feel like I could literally die from the way I am feeling. like physically my body feels like its shutting itself down because it's just so sad and tired or something

rant over I guess, thanks for coming to my Ted talk or whatever",1.8435403726708088,3.5023564285714315,3.6999689440993815,89.01840062111805,77.88198757763975,7.208695652173913,25.475155279503106,8.07648339933343,1.431185093167702,1198,45,265,21,28,404,159,322,0.235,0.664,0.10099999999999999,-0.9957,0,0,4,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,4,2,15,17,4,1,12,0,26,11,5,3,1,48,56,20,5,7,13,2,6,7,0,0,2,4,0,0,12,12,0,0,13,0,0,6,7,10,0,0,2,10,42,7,40,50,3,32,1,2,0,4,13,16,4,5,12,169,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19486774998107426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754414869765356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295448127484585,0.06789211362862943,0.0,0.05382278881492627,0.0,0.0,0.0994763372201909,0.0,0.07808826711508221,0.09639343847992478,0.09807397503923984,0.0,0.09856454630163897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605687779372805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049503211903667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604690777701742,0.0,0.27490358163562617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035472190455847,0.10347911433447148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436805169545422,0.07935234349609993,0.0,0.08323508489058944,0.0,0.2678625353055501,0.2523070639177174,0.0,0.0,0.08069849558918142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265030091428896,0.0,0.0,0.1003582577953194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726504707354716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906144197042315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059181151749574036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967241201699782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09194390660981283,0.048523700009602565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062364183583292515,0.17254262658522007,0.0,0.0,0.07813681042728557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0589364772036941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807397503923984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047488624829598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471982253531278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671510490731743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242294287232736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696888864397129,0.0907802389538674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15080402697313552,0.0,0.14042878497578254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718900477121047,0.0,0.0988371438892553,0.0,0.09410893211009604,0.0705111599971397,0.0,0.0,0.09230334937402808,0.0,0.19315712461029336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638558895811901,0.0709668267203154,0.0771722540135452,0.08128862715684107,0.10097110710688746,0.0,0.0,0.05657479480299436,0.0,0.0,0.05148454536033289,0.1014801837199524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059945369057558436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083107526971296,0.07008312828865364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857633947140598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997843694481124,0.06272104179549555,0.1930697714258456,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Arkanist_2099,2020/02/19,"I often don't feel real. I have difficulty fitting in or connecting with others, forming relationships is hard, I have only had one serious girlfriend in my life. I often change my interests on a weekly basis. It's not completely random but the change definitely happens. It's like there is this void in the center of me and I am trying desperately to find pieces that fit it, to make myself an actual person, not some weird alien.",5.38111111111111,7.0513554444444475,7.010802469135804,68.84361111111113,68.62962962962962,9.844444444444443,28.314814814814817,10.125756701596842,3.1929407407407404,345,12,56,9,6,119,64,81,0.08900000000000001,0.752,0.159,0.7831,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,7,1,0,1,0,14,10,3,0,0,4,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,2,9,2,8,9,3,8,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,5,2,46,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.24597712245961564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5332984524038493,0.0,0.2642832544119725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745062384700262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303810107962341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22289847390423356,0.0,0.22579893317706945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178039547658271,0.12314524709513044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16825400637055402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17080440875899214,0.19170526598490134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22009168458916065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869028717635596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706213245376116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113422766068312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20218973027155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myasaurusrex,2020/02/19,"Intrusive thoughts I have always had a little anxiety since I was small. When I was 12 almost 13, I was taking a shower and I had a religious intrusive thought. It scared me so bad. I quickly got out and dressed.  I went into the living room with my mom and tried to watch tv to clear my mind, but there it was again: another intrusive thought but worse this time. Something was wrong, i had no idea what was going on. Suddenly the Intrusive thoughts started to replay like it was on a loop and the loop would never stop. I thought I was going crazy, I thought to myself why would I think these things they are not me.

I started to have a panic attack. I ran into the kitchen to get a drink of water to calm me down, but it didn’t help. My mom was clueless what was going on. I didn’t tell her what was going on.  I ran into my room and grabbed my bible to read it. I prayed over and over for God to forgive me for the thoughts in my head.

I was so worried. I love my relationship with God. These thoughts were harmful towards it. When I got one, I would say under my breath, “i would never say that” over and over and over. People thought I was talking to my self when I did that. I got bullied at school about it. 

Months went by and I still hadn’t told no one. My parents knew something was wrong with me but I would deny it. It started to get worse and worse. I would set in my room and cry all night because I couldn’t go to sleep, because the thoughts haunted me.

Suddenly, the intrusive thoughts were about the people I loved. I hated myself. Why would this happen I thought 

I thought I was going crazy. It got worse when my uncles house burned down and his mom and him had to stay with us for a while. I let his mom use my room, and I had to share one with my mom. I was depressed, I had no room to go calm my self down in. Eventually I would lock my self in the bathroom and lay on the floor to cry. My friend group had broken up also which made matters worse


My mom finally got me into counseling. But I wasn’t truthful to my counselor. I wouldn’t tell her the cause of my panic attacks were the thoughts. I had no idea what they were called. I thought they were me. I was so ashamed of them. After about a a couple of weeks of counseling, they tested me for ADHD (the results came back negative). Then they diagnosed me with General anxiety disorder. They gave me medicine that didn’t work because the thoughts were still there

I was at the lowest of lows at 14. I was so depressed. I was on 7 pills a day. No one new the cause why, only I did. One day it got so bad, I cried to my mom and told her what was going on with the thoughts. We did researching and researching and learned that they was intrusive thoughts.

My brother came out and told us he had them to. We told the counselor the cause of my mental health. We learned coping skills and I got on new medicine. I slowly was getting better and better. I finally felt like me in the first time in 2 years. 

It’s been a year since then and I am 15 now. I feel so better. I just wanted to make this post to say that even when you feel like your going to die and never make it out of the slump you are in, it does get better. It takes time. If you have intrusive thoughts please please please tell someone about them you will feel tens times better. I thank God I am better. Of course there are still bad days but it gets better",1.48341641980533,3.529316197122302,2.4881157426999567,95.42800941599664,80.55395683453237,5.527084214980958,22.019149386373254,6.592961221068697,0.2983427845958526,2627,82,587,25,68,830,241,695,0.19399999999999998,0.685,0.121,-0.9964,3,0,3,0,0,0,74.0,5,5,10,10,28,35,3,4,32,0,67,11,3,8,6,111,139,45,1,12,9,9,5,3,1,10,3,3,7,3,33,42,3,1,30,3,0,15,17,16,0,7,87,9,120,19,84,40,1,105,1,3,1,2,60,45,0,2,45,411,153,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04568660747068783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03806650200296794,0.0,0.0,0.03040055841267055,0.031631501019691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03986201146798928,0.0581626972177249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864950346040242,0.0,0.029231166019496563,0.09522273818963088,0.0695207200686399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23534806691851845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0388175355132198,0.08695799857810509,0.0,0.11715554014534925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042062842131604314,0.12527298112803667,0.07354953379378268,0.0,0.06548447728874211,0.03858439515104577,0.039453537898382254,0.0,0.04356844999703918,0.0,0.03326715712363232,0.0,0.0,0.037240198931433134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025108529684301537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057664534372501776,0.02715790273378847,0.03650033350951317,0.0832870847040699,0.0,0.0323355147407588,0.0,0.0,0.029370272138265117,0.0,0.09930626615929122,0.0,0.19444305563826314,0.0,0.21282831416541406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0336165131302367,0.0,0.0,0.03753191339923838,0.039014327358012524,0.040408136298018614,0.0,0.0,0.025480633604656588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043864172313126386,0.0,0.08582854966541849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03887288323395064,0.0,0.05571658356456432,0.03810098763068662,0.033567915681119435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861999069736217,0.03597068453253775,0.05075057639740287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03831014934775463,0.0,0.0383842836558925,0.3116587204365209,0.030343187006927518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879584670839169,0.07343019136582693,0.0,0.03567447488910719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879964023925786,0.028912098312013405,0.0,0.08920475489668127,0.042211126302612506,0.0,0.0,0.052709588440141,0.0,0.0,0.1251870667639295,0.0,0.0,0.03640783371590285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03802525818890935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04081385193130243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069309176314162,0.038059617533998766,0.03847317996993036,0.0,0.0,0.11897371589790895,0.0,0.0,0.0628927533598261,0.0,0.038042424755198936,0.0,0.03220996139383946,0.05853156352735736,0.0,0.0,0.08072157597825821,0.04051890081777798,0.09107641435548944,0.031782217784778466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057165054037102,0.030554993545872062,0.09968028016515176,0.034999077638327866,0.0,0.0,0.02525545742103246,0.02435845831006668,0.0,0.5734131695020709,0.0886673407222702,0.0,0.0,0.1452997347728075,0.0,0.02580966980357152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145465842001063,0.03283272918945539,0.0,0.0,0.022422214710547568,0.0,0.03049331654640585,0.0,0.0,0.07048051757074425,0.10290779488399808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027675351497006968,0.038606048135888714,0.19370251476450293,0.2160379564164028,0.08312680575487746,0.0,0.04896078964817655
mentalhealth,BasicLui,2020/02/19,"Possible OCD? Hello all. I recently came to a realization that tasks that are outside of my daily routine are a pain to complete. For example, I recently had to make an appointment with my dentist and I waited forever to confirm it because I felt like it was too much of an inconvenience. Is this a form of OCD or something else?",3.332857142857143,5.7407425238095255,5.549444444444443,73.97750000000002,76.14285714285714,9.279365079365078,34.3095238095238,9.725611199111238,4.09012380952381,261,15,45,8,6,91,46,63,0.1,0.86,0.040999999999999995,-0.5661,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,5,2,0,1,1,8,9,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,6,1,9,5,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,36,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17228787954354202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32325202837902306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963308960486564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361000775303184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713679485818282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13807814459159345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18865690367896387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20776467120071432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007369461490122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3186214809603411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5581236425287723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175814409691099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,poproxx_001,2020/02/19,"Dealing with imposter syndrome coming into uni? So, I got good marks in school and, because of that, I got into law at university. After I got accepted, I was okay at first and I genuinely thought I was going to be fine, but, as the start of the school year has gotten closer, I can't help but feel like I can't do this. 

I got really good marks at school. Straight As besides Mathematics, which doesn't really matter anyway since Law is really intertwined with maths at all. Anyway, I wrote good essays and I always came up with solid arguments when we had to write persuasive texts. However, I can't help but think that was all a fluke now, like the teachers just felt sorry for me so they gave me good marks or I was everyone's favourite and was given good marks for work that was actually subpar. I can't help but think that it's all been a lie that's over now and, once I start law, I'm going to get the marks I deserve and fail out. No matter how much I've tried thinking positively, it hasn't worked, and I'm terrified to start school again because I'm dreading what might be coming. To put it simply, how do I feel better?",3.640750773993808,4.919388013157897,4.804623323013416,84.50363777089784,72.37719298245614,7.996284829721363,24.376676986584112,8.4952907291091,1.4523593395252845,889,25,182,15,17,293,120,228,0.138,0.6890000000000001,0.174,0.8375,1,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,1,5,11,13,0,1,6,1,21,0,0,2,3,44,48,19,0,0,6,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,11,17,0,0,8,0,0,6,7,2,0,1,19,3,21,11,25,26,4,28,0,1,0,0,9,12,0,2,12,113,32,8,0.0,0.0,0.10560518206727584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004606622534472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131937407574334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957100491444516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237725913467254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18644049305597396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115680322597488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340696076778416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094365703717862,0.07731097890630786,0.10390627515269583,0.0,0.0,0.09205019704769674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05653945169155681,0.0,0.12300559534104917,0.4538407263138859,0.3462073629889628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21760878368690184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573972172827607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480222330393958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955270033034555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524866510365102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10878900545832146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079817142884883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4380896764039556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951906883280268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114121939723235,0.2297918259341409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20802522290391667,0.0,0.08591302402747808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347293556951108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575680225960726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968886023398624
mentalhealth,Ve75,2020/02/19,"Does anyone feel that having unlimited internet access has killed their desire to form relationships? I'm 30 years old, and I've spent most of my life depressed and isolated. So, naturally I've spent thousands of hours browsing reddit and watching Youtube videos about anything and everything, indulging every curiosity I've ever had. I've followed social trends, learned about psychological phenomena, probed into all sorts of crap basically. I'm not particularly knowledgeable about anything, but I have this sense of knowing all of the fundamentals... the most important stuff, and I feel like it's a major factor in why I have so little interest in getting to know anyone.

What would I stand to gain from forming new relationships? They aren't going to introduce me to some new topic I had never heard of or thought about before. They aren't going to tell me some new joke I haven't heard before. Any interaction we might have could only be a variation on something I've already seen or experienced a thousand times already.

I'm a little envious of people who lived in the pre-internet days, as they had a major incentive to interact with others and make friends; they could reasonably expect that others might be able to introduce them to something new! This is one of the reasons I feel so empty, and as though I'm already at the end of life. Everything's already been done.

Perhaps it's my own fault, because I suppose that other people who haven't relied on the internet as their sole window into the world still have curiosities and a sense of wonder, and I've killed that in myself.

I've just realised the irony of writing all these things, while simultaneously seeking to have a conversation with others about it which, according to my feelings on the matter, shouldn't be particularly interesting. I guess I'm just in the mood to hear some new stories from people who've screwed their lives up as badly as I have.",10.470624999999998,8.946158448863637,9.952500000000004,62.8925,58.26136363636364,12.663636363636366,40.75,11.45678717892309,4.75399659090909,1562,66,253,34,16,506,183,352,0.10400000000000001,0.8190000000000001,0.078,-0.8540000000000001,1,0,2,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,8,1,13,14,5,0,17,0,27,4,1,3,5,55,52,22,2,6,6,0,4,1,1,4,2,3,1,0,20,14,0,0,12,2,2,3,7,8,0,3,11,10,25,5,49,32,13,34,0,1,2,1,23,15,2,12,16,175,45,1,0.09057069358378968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39978805021072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06159117743839819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665826965460586,0.0,0.14906392739246552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562274600206602,0.05521105416189325,0.0,0.15413797878603244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14462665804448874,0.0,0.0,0.058410604635010036,0.0,0.0780084056691807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925902430030786,0.09268526500938083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802187517091407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192637761660262,0.07630971562632621,0.0,0.16279819872214965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831810560832608,0.06470372159313963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997469319251645,0.0,0.04731944923000806,0.0,0.10294682473224076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997738300128264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207975414644023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919388910313532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20040610657162167,0.0,0.09955056913077187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794551874370885,0.044248265982596485,0.18155125749179696,0.15995116353302832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06045664126014126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921623862487527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698537023979684,0.437368701224692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503870728563328,0.0,0.06137304596034932,0.06888309374223303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18837094505147545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186243515063702,0.0,0.19447805954625932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092325416272281,0.0,0.13945148960907958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232987289094882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368177530484864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916277825714639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060171144351466636,0.0,0.08898524659354487,0.0719030138608826,0.052812499778931835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817259635891538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822005370449703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433882212177634,0.0,0.0,0.05832455719112827
mentalhealth,uniform1992,2020/02/19,"Wellness app questionnaire Hey guys, I'm building a health and wellness app and would love some insight on your environment and coping mechanisms when dealing with stress, anxiety, and depression.

​

If you feel like there is anything I missed please PM me or comment below! All feedback is super important!

Thank you in advance for your time :) <3

[Survey](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdnioJlZnn-zgwzfrFirG7Cuqrfz7LaSnov07_l_rsRjO2NQQ/viewform?usp=sf_link)",12.288872549019608,16.608254455882353,8.265294117647063,55.990490196078476,55.91176470588235,10.415686274509804,42.215686274509814,10.504223727775694,5.706992156862746,405,21,45,10,6,112,59,68,0.125,0.5539999999999999,0.32,0.9449,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,4,0,2,4,9,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,12,8,7,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,6,6,5,7,2,6,0,2,0,1,9,3,0,3,3,27,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514557883968732,0.2819994683229556,0.0,0.0,0.17753859163238475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19097994298060889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23926163028427616,0.19988794240586155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734531706588172,0.16579615573869005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297931336799229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466874458034389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338130508393175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20945893311365185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547513164168757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658439013351189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21366570842067548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532621034314204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4173309452228353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16486114105802713,0.0,0.2819994683229556,0.0
mentalhealth,paranoia_muscipula,2020/02/19,"Didn't thought this was possible Last night got a really heavy anxiety attack, couldn't sleep till 6am, good thing I'm on vacations, thing is just so happens I need to return to said place and I'm getting anxious of thinking if this will happen again, just so happens that place is my bed and now I'm dying on the inside.",3.510454545454543,4.853518833333332,4.576181818181818,85.76427272727273,72.78787878787878,7.704242424242422,26.83636363636364,8.238735603445708,1.6970400000000003,257,9,52,4,5,84,50,66,0.114,0.841,0.045,-0.5334,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,6,2,1,0,2,0,6,1,1,0,0,9,18,6,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,1,2,1,6,11,0,10,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,6,30,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507785084170797,0.22266327656387894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22422605771288198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20455535525893528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297494032587194,0.0,0.0,0.16531544014460875,0.15763631180336396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5228761337170873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16066019378516508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14614477581642316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849619900606305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41184840095563896,0.0,0.0,0.2221970216118473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626525359417234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18748418640840744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19723913558155493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618847049049074,0.12629166758147592,0.0,0.15647283901350406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bigbybest5,2020/02/19,"I can’t breath Um so yea, I think there’s something wrong with me, well duh there something wrong with me. I guess what I’m trying to say is the last couple of years I haven’t been ok... which I’m sure many of you who read this aren’t ok either, I hope it gets better whom ever you are. Ok I’m getting of topic here, for the last couple of years I’ve felt a constant feeling of fear (like I can’t breath) I’m so afraid of everything, not like horror movies or roller coasters. I’m afraid I’ll never be normal, I’ll never do good in school, hang out with my friends, fall in love. I don’t know why I always feel that way and the irony is I’m too afraid to ask. I can’t ask for help right now, I’ve tried before but, when I did it.. just was a joke to my family. Anyways I can’t ask again right now because of everything that’s going on right now. So I’m here. I think I have anxiety, most likely social. I’ve done research and that lines up. It’s feels better to finally let go. Thank you, for reading",-0.0228290649195948,1.8726993515981791,1.9170855668056392,98.27728409767721,85.16438356164383,4.721937661306334,16.371054198927933,5.7926816847441245,-0.7450200119118522,774,15,187,5,23,256,120,219,0.062,0.7909999999999999,0.147,0.9365,1,0,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,3,0,2,17,22,0,4,5,5,18,3,2,0,4,26,43,8,0,2,5,0,4,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,11,6,0,0,7,4,0,4,10,6,2,0,5,5,20,16,22,36,2,27,0,0,0,1,13,8,0,4,17,102,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401983501731004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864398940974707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169016532776888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887992897827995,0.0,0.09614934176501756,0.0,0.0,0.1998675435202339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210608026593217,0.0,0.0,0.2500508259225965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156318162746757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220929770933804,0.0,0.0,0.2031029571160257,0.0,0.10652043236702276,0.12714936026641446,0.17139907476023986,0.0,0.1084917004888548,0.1237791080175852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729867542909789,0.0,0.11806912045899295,0.0,0.1284338812894896,0.09477377969046168,0.0,0.0,0.1244753325126295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573731534760221,0.0,0.0,0.1122282692899514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062098398912727636,0.18420994188447165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155437443840564,0.0,0.1656090866888516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198125280616806,0.0,0.0,0.1145579070532816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17429546068558438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070986446334484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260486152197654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894880838467684,0.0,0.0898571492541797,0.0,0.11435568710799883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518287799898765,0.0,0.17397618730523018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649525320662157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402944530723242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448036392685146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15343065100024444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896891633708772,0.0,0.0,0.10159493318318903,0.0,0.1019592661860049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470818111895565,0.0,0.14552851482366194
mentalhealth,nwdysdwtfdstfuk,2020/02/19,"so i tried to kill myself and it didn’t work. now what? having trouble figuring out how to get back to normal life. Last night i was hanging out with friends drinking quite a bit and ended up trying to kill myself with a kitchen knife. I’ve been debating it for some time but for some reason i woke up on my friends couch after being passed out for a bit around 4 or 5am, saw the knife and just thought i’d try it. once i started bleeding (there was so much blood), i yelled for my friend and he came and helped me. my dad’s wife works in the ICU so i texted her and said i was coming to see her for help and not to tell my dad. somehow i convinced my friend to take me to my car so i could drive myself (keep in mind we were still pretty intoxicated). he dropped me off and i went to start my car and not only was it dead but the key got stuck IN the ignition so i couldn’t even walk away. i ended up calling my dad and he took me to the hospital and i got stitches then me, my dad and his wife all just went to breakfast and went home. my birthday is in two days and i have all these plans with friends and family and i just kind of disappeared today. haven’t talked to anyone. i still want to die but seeing my dad so upset and the thought of hurting anyone else makes me not want to. I always thought if i ever tried and was unsuccessful, i’d feel some overwhelming sense of relief but it’s the opposite. I just feel crazy and like I caused a fuss. How do I just go back to living life? Also, how do i explain this cut on my arm to my friends and coworkers?

tl;dr: tried to kill myself. didn’t work. don’t know how to explain this stitched up cut on my arm to friends/coworkers. how do i go back to living life normally again?",1.2609594985535215,3.058300030054647,2.6650658952105424,95.12849566055931,80.12021857923497,5.726647380263582,20.873995499839282,6.661559191721324,0.13578778527804536,1345,37,312,13,34,436,172,366,0.133,0.754,0.113,-0.8774,0,0,1,0,0,4,33.0,1,0,0,5,29,19,5,2,11,0,20,11,3,9,3,77,52,39,5,7,14,7,2,1,6,0,5,2,3,0,9,30,3,1,10,1,0,15,8,9,0,1,23,7,51,10,49,26,8,52,0,2,3,0,28,17,0,6,20,205,60,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813326408241245,0.0708920337265734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914563948177034,0.08729600126078507,0.0,0.07584478870343618,0.0,0.0,0.08004685924154596,0.19653731949342632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860295401340992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699726374263984,0.09744446468343046,0.0,0.08752239840561482,0.0,0.07339102237207408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802412391157799,0.0,0.0,0.054946028085913104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842266250923808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346216124830774,0.0,0.0,0.07117247115827002,0.0,0.1509212860222801,0.0,0.0,0.05627285066542069,0.0770669825047634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031762747235048,0.0,0.08615791186593272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.394945213953973,0.0,0.044512735361132864,0.0,0.09684061924096024,0.0,0.13628215580223496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11421360850067055,0.0,0.08546111041353167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120682920848773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572840191415665,0.282778776963886,0.08872119790766797,0.046822904861264544,0.06944820425626035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18053480468882688,0.04162371679979926,0.0,0.1504637929837917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05687070574627556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602626634157981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263075058432131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995308459886323,0.16695301462621862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073369438509654,0.0,0.06479735019104327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667757313760623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061916441252482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875983177494426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104334848444668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578445606860404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060796995059872,0.0,0.13607937298887424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06405872007554851,0.06847938172838422,0.07446730374828159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20291443876068904,0.049679970174477034,0.0,0.08075828049747052,0.0,0.09465874395739138,0.28922117560078864,0.0,0.08322662114166395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050464570082147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369397784307405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18607671673556492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sullenlulumumbles,2020/02/19,"Why am I so weak? Hi all, I'm new here so please forgive me if I format this all wrong, I'll be as brief as possible. I have been a stay-at-home mom of one child (17m) for about 6 months now, and I love it; I feel like the time with my daughter has given me the best mental health I've had in this lifetime (I'm 33, have Bipolar II). Recently we ran into a tight spot financially and so this past Monday I began babysitting 2 boys (ages 1 & 3) in their home. The plan is for me to keep them just MWF. They're good kids, I still have my daughter with me, so all is well, right? Easy money... Except it's not. I have only watched them the one day so far (yesterday) and since my daughter and I got home from their house I have been SEVERELY depressed at the thought of having to go back, and especially at possibly having to do this long term. Not for any tangible reason, other than it's disrupting this peaceful little day-to-day that I've built with my daughter the past 6 months. I know that sounds ridiculously lazy and selfish, I know that people have to do MUCH harder things to survive, but I truly don't have control over this feeling. I have been crying and nauseous all day today. My wonderful, amazing mom has offered to help us financially (which she does too much of already) so that I can continue to stay home, because she knows how much I've struggled to he happy in my life and how happy I am now. Do I admit defeat and welcome her help until we get out of this bind? Or do I suck it up and keep at the babysitting? I really hope this doesn't make me sound like a spoiled brat, I am doing my best to overcome this depressive feeling but it's rocking my world, and not in a good way.",4.246674436674437,4.440231068376072,5.222586117586122,86.03600815850821,70.22507122507123,8.091219891219891,27.920357420357426,7.84624498591911,1.5070444444444444,1319,42,286,15,22,434,189,351,0.08800000000000001,0.7070000000000001,0.205,0.993,0,0,0,0,0,0,50.0,3,0,4,6,17,23,2,1,11,0,30,5,0,5,4,50,53,26,0,2,9,6,4,2,0,0,4,2,3,3,21,18,0,4,11,1,1,3,5,9,1,2,9,7,43,14,37,43,10,42,0,3,1,1,28,15,1,4,24,187,64,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078915665748038,0.0,0.0,0.10593369560395607,0.0,0.06648691592970786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517905346758327,0.0,0.059599651591720086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052070527254371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096573079456817,0.0,0.0,0.10739569471828662,0.2522141073633819,0.0,0.16841822238988033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555913857298537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483062670124805,0.06984686893191791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051080761460394114,0.0,0.055564913400532566,0.16400958402158347,0.07819555724181247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081558510065064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10392488063076086,0.0,0.0,0.13106626775508753,0.0,0.2942136824275528,0.09710761679983766,0.0,0.11281339079803868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17380484046062633,0.0,0.0,0.16119541619022024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905780423506276,0.09553091409439878,0.09799117094215902,0.0,0.08652332553721245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824119342590127,0.0,0.06526219812692799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852910979483223,0.0,0.0,0.2290139581227237,0.15607807617726838,0.0,0.2156164795127343,0.0,0.0,0.09442682305496086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250289138235916,0.07435844958798926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18666495264491065,0.06778137014706599,0.0,0.0,0.10732204090453933,0.0,0.22044184773978792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626339309269755,0.10052378801232144,0.09653602658511394,0.0,0.0,0.08349499964720054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11045220983043046,0.0,0.08087630962802292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20841950738439255,0.07807920514130115,0.0,0.0,0.102210375652539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495400773741603,0.0,0.0,0.07761841608633893,0.057010441736586426,0.0,0.09267447683399124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760520689855047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760523228969553,0.0,0.0,0.08790692311996272,0.0,0.08822216909006292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602733581110316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689608772819956,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TashDee267,2020/02/19,I’m scared of myself And I don’t know why,-4.549999999999997,-3.5407564545454515,-0.5722727272727255,108.96159090909092,113.54545454545456,2.2,5.5,3.1291,-2.9281272727272727,33,0,10,0,2,12,10,11,0.293,0.7070000000000001,0.0,-0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775729159621853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6878354174965441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6199363931639821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frog_girl98,2020/02/19,"Trouble with my new job (sort of long) I started working at a neurology/neurosurgery/neuropsych/pain clinic (I know it’s a lot but they’re all connected) checking patients in and I really do like it, but I have a couple of issues. First is my supervisor, she has reminded me at least once a week that I’m on probation and that it’s to see if I feel like I’m a good fit and if she thinks I’m a good fit (essentially telling me that she can fire me on the spot), she’s a micromanager, and when she needs something from any of us that check patients in, she doesn’t care to check if we’re busy with something, she wants us there and paying full attention. Oh and she only seems to care if I’m in dress code but doesn’t say a thing when some of my other coworkers are clearly breaking dress code. In a couple of weeks we’ll be having a meeting to talk about anything that we find stressful but I also don’t want to throw her under the bus since she is nice at times. 

Secondly, there’s lots of patients with sad cases like they had a stroke and can no longer do what they were able to before or in chronic pain, and a majority of the time I have no clue how to respond or how to react. I feel like I’m not genuine if I say “I’m sorry” and based off of my own chronic health condition, I know they probably hear that a lot. I want to be able to comfort them but not seem generic or scripted. And like yesterday I checked in a patient and she had MS and her body couldn’t stay the slightest bit still and found myself getting almost annoyed at how much she was moving even though I know it was out of her control, and today there was a guy that had had a stroke and his right side was a bit messed up and his hand was pressing and at times rubbing his groin area and again I know it was out of his control but it made me uncomfortable.",3.9017232375979103,4.328866723237598,4.9268365535248035,87.02619216710184,71.0626631853786,7.903456919060052,27.85263707571801,7.839951260653429,1.4558251488250655,1437,48,318,17,25,472,186,383,0.087,0.7659999999999999,0.14800000000000002,0.9784,1,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,4,0,4,4,14,17,1,1,21,0,29,9,2,7,2,72,56,39,0,10,16,0,8,5,0,1,7,3,0,1,16,24,0,2,12,0,5,2,8,6,0,2,13,12,49,11,43,39,12,43,0,1,1,0,34,24,0,16,20,217,65,3,0.1936552928844172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695890118732177,0.0,0.0,0.07743303387696908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584611994217895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968090277177696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239319542917707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114214235486638,0.10755368696693256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19744447754436764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21720087781366088,0.0,0.21427589819406884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395374727179602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791793477285968,0.13834737993078475,0.0,0.0,0.08849871466745927,0.0823615465993165,0.0,0.10616651653651657,0.0,0.0,0.05058844885232626,0.0,0.0,0.16242887175831008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587459319867424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292326030319117,0.10913179475936076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106290627334674,0.0960864983429454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21285576889167715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365254854916164,0.0,0.0,0.0856894201130156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469582072472849,0.0,0.0916206602581642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291246447707153,0.07117946126681497,0.07179647293824454,0.0,0.09351674430514048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311828334843184,0.0,0.07364178834015472,0.20606288534236844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439657974829483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620302697244676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269028100437435,0.0,0.15400246165599965,0.0,0.0,0.07715909789679458,0.1762965054578289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009682972628447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908530560401936,0.0,0.1083906227958784,0.06853510652095643,0.1032053877790904,0.07732668352611766,0.0,0.11091574185308167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782639444418822,0.08463163084176528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432798580588196,0.06204324611116387,0.0951326710086566,0.0,0.1693829379232737,0.0,0.09178128706768672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23294347319264366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17133436376828567,0.0,0.15533859484468374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049167982163115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,callheralaska1979,2020/02/19,"Weathering the Storm- a resource I’m not sure if this is allowed here, and I may have already posted but can’t find my post here so unsure If it passed with the mods or I just didn’t write it BUT I have an Instagram account thats sole purpose is to help with mental help by learning coping strategies to deal with mental illness. It’s still in its infancy but I am hoping maybe someone could get something out of it. I could not get the link function to work but If you want to check it out yourself, my handle is ‘becausebipolar’ - sort of a misnomer because I talk about mental health in general, not just bipolar. 
Be kind to yourselves, friends",2.5542216838279828,5.01406706299213,3.36488188976378,88.33812840702606,79.15748031496062,5.482495457298608,27.092065414900066,6.67199483983844,1.269439006662629,515,22,97,5,13,163,86,127,0.051,0.79,0.158,0.9447,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,7,4,0,0,6,0,12,3,0,1,1,32,17,10,0,7,13,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,3,0,2,1,5,0,0,0,1,0,9,4,16,12,0,8,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,7,1,69,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19850906603462007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965705243753553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2872492341578248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18545493334734686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16441286966533078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13897975173979385,0.0,0.18796639203138735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19121078362939908,0.0,0.0,0.24114806399318595,0.0,0.0,0.178667739544022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18732395720134196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18072002208943874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5438494087218767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3445628060509188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524171249415117,0.1384853046250087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14365747556903874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954076083483702,0.0,0.0,0.1445858382729695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610163294565678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095940896490313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RedWolf272,2020/02/19,Anxiety-induced urination Thinking about urinating all the time convinces me that I have to actually pee. How can I cure it?,5.6931818181818175,8.503304681818186,6.936363636363637,64.9245454545455,70.36363636363637,11.672727272727276,42.81818181818181,11.20814326018867,6.379654545454548,101,7,15,4,2,34,21,22,0.0,0.914,0.086,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,3,3,1,1,3,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.7478135086722023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4910241107076,0.0,0.0,0.4468448041000148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dctchdt,2020/02/19,"Looking advice and guidance Hey my name is josh im 22 coming 23 im from northern ireland and i have autism and dyslexia and im looking advice and some help basically life was going well for me i was swimming alot and trying to aim for irish times to try get somewhere in swimming i was helping a swimming club on tuesday nights which was for disablitly swimmers i wasn't doing the best in school cause i was struggling with my english and just in general but i never said anything cause i was trying to comit to swimming basically school finished and i went to tech and to do computer level 2 course but i missed the entry day and then i seen sports level 2 i decided to do that basically half way through the course everything started to colapse i started to swim less due to a gala/race happened and i didnt get the time i needed so i kinda just gived up on swimming but i started doing weight training with a ex irish swimmer but i started to enjoy it more than swimming so i went to less training sessions and more to this then i knew i wasn't gonna pass my level 2 sports and i started to get not bullied just tortured most of the time and i was struggling with the science side of things in the course and the travel there 4-5 times a week was just getting tiredsome due to the buses being terrible and when i went to school i got a taxi so i started getting dispressed and just didnt go to tech i started arguing with my parents more and more which put me in a worse mood and like 2-3 months before the course was finished i just stopped going altogether so basically i sat in my room more and more and stopped weight training cause my dad started to get on my nerve more and was not intrested going anymore then i started going again after applying for a new course to help me in general it went ok but wasnt what i needed i started training again and coached/helped out at the swimming club again and the owner wanted to put me through my level 1 swimming teaching and then my level 2 and i thou this should be easy enough i swam for like 5 years before that and my plan was that i could become a swimming teacher so last day of my level 1 swimming i was ask to stay behide and i knew i wasn't getting it basically said they need to clear things up with me and i wasn't passing yet and they needed to redo some things with me after i got in my mums car i broke down basically and just got so upset and disapointed in myself 2-3 months go by and i havent moved from my room apart from to eat or go to the toliet i stopped doing everything but i started arguing more with my parents back and forward then they kicked me out and i ended up staying in my aunties for 6-7 months basically nothing got better just worse my dad knowing it was about me but my mum made it about her and it just became worse basically my auntie told her brother/my dad that shes not taking me in anymore cause they way they are treating her so i go home for like 3-4 days and arguements happen again i got kicked out at like 10 at night and walked up to my bestfriends house in barely any clothes and my pc (my pc was my saving grace if i ever felt down or shit i would play games and that would cheer me up but i started to go to it more with all the stuff going on and my dad and mum started using it againist me) i ended up on my friend sofa to like 3-4 in the morning and i couldnt sleep and i asked my auntie can i stay the night and i walked to hers at 4 in the morning tbh i was down with life at that point next day my dad comes up and takes me to the doctors to get stuff and meds and we came to the concludion that i was gonna get my own place which i did and me and my bestfriend moved in together everything was going ok and there was no arguing as much and i had my own space now but i started getting in to arguements with my bestfriend then one night i just cracked and threw him his girlfriend and her friend out with some of there stuff and locked the door dad climbed over the fence and came in the back and let my mother in and my auntie to clean the food i threw up i got my space and peace but i lost my best friend that i still haven't connected with i lived there for a year then wanted to get a new place thats more up to date so i moved out and got a new place but i still feel empty inside i don't do anything anymore i wake up get food and go on the pc and play games all day then go to bed repeat and my sleeping is everywhere but the new pip system came in there and i didnt get it and i applied for a apeal and im pancking and having problems sleeping over it cause if i dont get it i can afford to live where i am and in general and just feel like everything falling apart more and don't know what to do sorry this is alot to read but i need to give some background and i dont like speaking my problems i would rather write/type it down 

Josh ",1.7225374156720292,3.5825928117073182,3.0989522573949166,92.26630280228336,78.93170731707318,5.610482615464454,23.68474312402699,6.462258747201003,0.5364939283860929,3852,131,838,32,94,1254,332,1025,0.084,0.826,0.091,0.8352,3,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,1,5,6,41,38,5,3,39,2,60,13,5,7,5,178,154,106,0,18,32,13,5,7,4,6,3,3,7,0,35,94,5,4,8,21,0,50,20,14,1,2,54,11,142,23,131,89,28,200,0,3,3,0,51,71,1,12,82,574,177,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817512118527879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027201388036834983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190078266946156,0.0,0.0,0.06583322319747005,0.0,0.07478924582561601,0.0,0.0,0.061515098933922915,0.0,0.0,0.044176883959210746,0.06807414871011028,0.0,0.08395511494293488,0.03537677073539547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372481142745103,0.0,0.20545521624338475,0.0,0.06891295780948449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031936764400010906,0.0,0.0,0.12898353207585486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04094171959678751,0.0,0.0,0.09375946064515298,0.0,0.0,0.04093001065555813,0.0,0.0,0.07085629740568912,0.04133071755987483,0.0,0.0,0.03618231182916378,0.0,0.0,0.14379776972336886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0404504280868932,0.028576025198457436,0.03840629596269445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967363757976211,0.0,0.09271175815035454,0.0,0.29257706301766906,0.07674333588736977,0.29552816134691146,0.0,0.2239417133256553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074377839189748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724469191848447,0.0,0.04012328555951799,0.0,0.0,0.04615465728765144,0.0,0.0,0.17282756020007312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04396593429184356,0.032605358361087494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0409027347111022,0.05650639990447764,0.1367939390195065,0.0,0.07064150820232001,0.0,0.06717989193522621,0.0,0.04366475143118656,0.0,0.0,0.037848989949017774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044431009398106715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578291280563588,0.12754108590723365,0.029404620163977862,0.14829755510151968,0.03085048449734825,0.15452909006753096,0.042540479404405765,0.1501492517100057,0.0,0.03838110191583799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02710505152851949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883058612460526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537453479194738,0.0,0.03781295191037225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654924185552066,0.0,0.08042214457171933,0.0,0.0,0.040010848659245625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609836563570123,0.0,0.0,0.12144647961910045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0410594499071027,0.0,0.0,0.12008673487100352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0447767521125609,0.3963711209655416,0.1279041105050494,0.0638881418082797,0.1003254336518494,0.0,0.08363342021924344,0.13737137296502724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06015008009447756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972271585950813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093297342861731,0.0,0.0,0.03822173717625766,0.0,0.08147217204881428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03454717788221216,0.0,0.0,0.047186101140030766,0.06350031454105977,0.03208560655644845,0.09741850653175184,0.035964825461875405,0.14832169227825745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229032551976128,0.08524460835893656,0.0,0.0,0.051517408116421776
mentalhealth,daniellenmorrow,2020/02/19,Oppositional defiance disorder Does anyone have any experience with ODD? My 16 year old sister was recently diagnosed and I’m struggling to connect with her. If I do anything that’s not in her favor she refuses to talk to me for weeks. I live out of state and try and visit as much as possible but the way she acts towards me makes it so hard and I’m just trying to understand.,3.7856000000000014,5.508413626666666,5.805,75.70750000000002,72.73333333333333,9.8,29.83333333333333,10.125756701596842,3.2999333333333336,302,13,57,9,6,105,60,75,0.13,0.87,0.0,-0.7714,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,14,7,9,0,1,4,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,7,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,1,9,1,13,6,1,11,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,1,4,38,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16044322485898993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164970553280699,0.0,0.1941535964701594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394680650274601,0.0,0.0,0.2704008285264994,0.0,0.20646745178134013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307887448086797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113505407261269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083340631282317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15748779113082662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17343865241265188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475730667527429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26598015903338523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23295638252741135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466494656043253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896348291249085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203674263993962,0.0,0.0,0.2456156366079041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872734441112236,0.18925204039228607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193377417693646
mentalhealth,melineumgod,2020/02/19,"I feel hurt and broken I feel hurt and broken, that I let everyone down, and that I'm not good enough. I feel like I'm on the verge of a mental breakdown, and that I'm getting more and more unstable. All I ask is a helping hand",3.4825333333333366,3.1210347200000044,5.07,88.39833333333334,71.8,8.266666666666667,26.66666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.2358666666666671,176,5,42,2,3,60,29,50,0.322,0.54,0.138,-0.8901,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,3,0,2,1,1,0,1,10,10,5,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,5,2,3,9,4,3,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500701631290065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27639212478585423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556013487026506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4057580086011335,0.19109729491373684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975422930883186,0.0,0.0,0.2243607217168298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929514669333524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5727143039097227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735300624765608,0.0,0.13068373388269292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695703707263374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SonniSummers,2020/02/19,"Suffering with bipolar and probable ppd. Been closing in on myself. Tomorrow theres hope for true help So my baby is 17 days old. I had to go back to school a few days ago. I've been dealing with such unpredictable moods. I loathe my new instructors teaching style. And finally at the end of the day I had. I couldnt take her inability to control the class so we could actually learn. 15 k is what I'm paying to not be with my baby 4 hours a day and to end up self teaching everything anyway.

So I emailed my schools counselor about how to go about dropping out or transferring. Well that started a shit storm. See I'm top of my class. I took a leave of absence to have my baby and came right back due to my fasfa being declined if I didnt. So I did the hardest thing ever. I left my baby in the care of my husband, her father and his family during the day.

I couldnt do it anymore. Well my consoler didnt respond for over a hour. Instead my previous teacher blew up my phone asking why the hell would I dare dropping out. That I have so much potential. That she hasnt seen a student with no former or even with a former backround in my area of study pick it up so well and fast. I ignored this. Then my consoler called. Again i ignored this. Then my current teacher called. Again ignored this. See i feel so hopeless i didnt wanna have to explain myself.

Well my previous instructor contacts me again. She states she would really like to hear anything from me as she was getting concerned. I admire this women. The only person I've ever looked up to. So I caved. And I told her the truth. I didnt touch on the fact I dislike my class and new teacher. But I told her I was struggling and didnt see how I could succeed. That I go to class and feel like a moron. That I'm doing everything to stay caught up and care for my baby but that I'm letting self care be opitional.

I opened up I told her about the fact I spend most my time outside of class terrified my baby will die because of issues shes having, and sobbing. That I dont eat much anymore. That I dont sleep. That I'm getting each day that passes more and more dark and twisty thoughts. See she has a masters in psychology. She knows im trying get into the field myself. She asked me to self assess. I told her ""well im a unmedicated bipolar axis 1 person with probable postpartum depression or psychosis acurring""

She asked me if I know what's wrong why hadnt I asked for help sooner. I told her the trouble about being self aware with mental health issues is seeing what wrong but being so ran down you can summon the energy to fix it. She told me to come back to class tomorrow. That on break shell help me get a appointment with someone who specializes with my troubles. She said she knows it's hard. And she didnt judge anything I told her. No in fact she shared her similar struggles and how she herself needed someone to help her.

I may not feel better for a while. I may end up having my class and new teacher. But maybe once i get help itll be managable. I wont spend every moment consumed with rage, anxiety and sadness. I finally see a silver lining. I finally have hope again for the first time in months. And it makes me cry... but for once out of happiness.",1.673693119767016,3.9079679146341455,3.2663123407353503,89.08367491809248,80.98170731707317,6.050564251911175,23.6629959956316,7.258068376089391,1.0215139060793597,2536,91,516,35,67,836,275,656,0.12300000000000001,0.778,0.099,-0.9647,1,0,0,0,0,1,65.0,1,1,0,6,35,39,4,2,28,0,49,6,2,6,7,89,105,45,1,12,12,2,5,2,0,7,3,2,0,7,26,39,1,4,9,0,3,9,17,18,5,1,28,15,102,20,73,59,7,87,1,5,8,0,66,29,3,10,46,351,128,17,0.0,0.0,0.05460327042846983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04960006102135732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04280484333497956,0.0,0.11098314894353199,0.0,0.0,0.09209115003385122,0.0,0.2092386586506998,0.0,0.0,0.12907607884271416,0.0,0.034109187657207746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04948698154629713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11427107790915984,0.06399674849887856,0.17114724205284215,0.0,0.0,0.0481996264855036,0.0,0.0,0.06275744228046966,0.08934982123342816,0.0,0.061463109378833036,0.21651514953775047,0.05768636839024065,0.048193308173531735,0.0,0.05807167100346487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115591395952747,0.0,0.0,0.057255160374906036,0.0,0.0,0.1486765556577198,0.0,0.0,0.036957250296868256,0.10122763387222887,0.04714386366784895,0.0,0.10057613271042797,0.0,0.05274868123164572,0.0,0.08487644066985495,0.03997372293361125,0.0,0.1838854171036501,0.0,0.04759465117144868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14616891473302682,0.0,0.09540025861150662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05956433296426415,0.05012401188956806,0.0,0.0,0.05947674459526536,0.06306449936588501,0.0,0.1875247506903712,0.0,0.0,0.11115037876597386,0.11020731799012966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088037014858652,0.11680338626600455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225296714784442,0.0,0.0,0.05924746500355984,0.06079444958230401,0.0572170052767473,0.0,0.05467283430165431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04698747233526445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03734989221216374,0.0,0.05621355863431353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05638871714740781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044662143547211694,0.0,0.08226561470602144,0.04148936276610013,0.0,0.16212287193486202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871456632576896,0.11917888694450393,0.0,0.04255572378627973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771417481845278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120656277152854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035845721353069016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04778461845573121,0.053225299223671786,0.0,0.0,0.11325736391120965,0.26752972721365137,0.0,0.2334899177011064,0.0,0.05743622715175981,0.0,0.0,0.05599465326146494,0.0,0.09481969834568613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039604701739416666,0.059639778915961526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699104912655188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04207062772783677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037173513264480894,0.0,0.0,0.04442141940829687,0.0652547390355445,0.0,0.0,0.3742667445594413,0.06216722365853376,0.037989258590736534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515479249448416,0.0,0.10098000376354288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949657874527805,0.12235436344896496,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hippy_guyana,2020/02/19,"It's probably nothing this probably doesn't fit in but oh well. I think I might have some sort of paranoia. When I hear people in the Halls of my apartment or hear the people above me I usually put myself in a hidden place. My friend and my girlfriend had to talk me out of keeping a shotgun under my bed when I told them it was there. I've always slept with a knife in or around my bed. I constantly fear people slandering me to my friends and family. if two or more look at me, even friends, I think they're talking about me. When I see maintenance people outside my apartment pass by my window, my heart drops. This is probably something simple like anxiety or some shit but I feel like venting a little bit.",2.6725243770314218,4.761460943661973,3.793943661971831,87.31709100758397,76.88732394366198,6.904442036836404,25.711809317443123,7.882392219407189,1.5397187432286028,562,21,111,9,13,182,90,142,0.10400000000000001,0.753,0.14400000000000002,0.7909,0,0,1,1,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,8,8,1,1,6,0,6,3,3,0,0,20,16,12,0,1,7,0,1,2,4,1,0,2,3,0,4,5,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,2,1,1,4,5,25,6,16,11,4,22,0,0,2,0,10,14,1,9,7,76,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139461427423253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241390722628334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917701521889053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14615668205243687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446711718783353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842308739742535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620531054606035,0.15064644539617592,0.06769115551118213,0.09564023211052296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102941716804346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30177341086314885,0.15864236260147047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899413343631375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080899598555346,0.134177787451362,0.0,0.0,0.11242117147544577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202007837591907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284565460169924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37124790690065135,0.0,0.13987074275230746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4330192501079628,0.0,0.0,0.13458121835083753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668093658123444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13742062768259572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306341355629732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152070948561853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715632189617385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792317300315148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13077629279449166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744425288181573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036958363173222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MommaDoll,2020/02/19,"Seeing a new Psychiatrist I have an appt with a new psychiatrist Monday. But I have this issue I can’t seem to control. I basically tell them what I think they want to hear, or what a normal person would say. I make my life seem much better than it is. Don’t get me wrong, I have a good life. But I have some shit I need to deal with & I can’t seem to tell them about it. I’ve been to many doctors & I do it every time, even with the intention of going and spilling my guts. Any suggestions?? 😓",2.1606775700934584,3.0885842616822434,3.962698598130842,90.47432827102804,75.54205607476634,7.219158878504674,20.85163551401869,7.645422480735847,0.4236364485981308,384,8,92,5,8,130,67,107,0.07,0.853,0.078,-0.2406,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,3,2,2,4,1,0,6,0,11,5,2,3,0,19,22,4,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,6,4,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,3,17,2,11,20,2,5,0,0,1,0,10,0,1,5,4,58,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3436596902720509,0.0,0.10784516109477636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025804616313298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778697338454439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16349708686702624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623213616685151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474576456741816,0.0,0.13361708473666992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285559454079873,0.0,0.09012911718198964,0.13301594578845316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787400077137463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16552448978506498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22403054551231302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585860649392714,0.1607831660191934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658030076335328,0.11759086483548248,0.0,0.3063302245752081,0.0,0.0,0.15538239983463864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847277419473655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261154058953485,0.0,0.0,0.12637396630074035,0.4331172067900403,0.0,0.0,0.1627881262418702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27722550303217725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016166765418662,0.0,0.0,0.09247383770465016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935392096901452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265624274371047,0.1733908941367809,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hihunx,2020/02/19,"I’m here If anyone ever wants to talk, or let somthing out or get some advice, I’m here for however you need me.

Please don’t suffer in silence, you deserve to be heard♡",4.750540540540541,3.735564189189192,5.976351351351353,85.16560810810813,69.27027027027027,8.481081081081081,29.31081081081081,7.1686216300943375,1.4919837837837844,133,4,30,1,2,45,31,37,0.095,0.8420000000000001,0.062,-0.29600000000000004,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,8,8,3,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,5,6,1,3,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,4,1,18,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884184435249053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779312561878205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3595485886234369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076698821557553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4064560773687728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29473062354230484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4363199558926245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3194839638197108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344473751103165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rosecats1,2020/02/19,"Mania? I’m not sure. My doctor told me I’m bipolar prone and put me on Prozac to treat my depression cause I didn’t have a definitive bipolar diagnosis yet. For the past week or so I’ve had this really weird manic episode that started off pretty hypomanic and was okay but now I’m pretty manic and I’m feeling really unwell (for lack of better words). I’m pretty sure the Prozac induced a manic episode and I’m really anxious, paranoid, unable to sleep, having racing thoughts, etc. and it’s really starting to unnerve me and make me even more anxious then I already am. I’m seeing my doctor in a few days but if anyone has any advice or anything to say I’d appreciate it :)",3.4068080808080796,5.1335667851851845,5.454141414141414,77.81818181818183,73.74074074074073,7.575757575757577,27.08754208754209,8.296473431620573,2.0389259259259265,536,20,97,9,11,186,86,135,0.133,0.6859999999999999,0.18100000000000002,0.8495,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,5,1,7,7,1,3,2,21,21,13,0,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,5,3,9,5,10,16,4,12,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,3,8,56,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436273373065913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16219629085872106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995156708525013,0.0,0.0,0.3320915493283552,0.0,0.10277196396306856,0.0,0.12095217008686525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299920308710033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15098913924213594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479006101978593,0.0,0.12659381938679332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008808982337471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639217605689763,0.09707902707711956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431759862914378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811041590665626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403092193092404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4485950704524405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477556837800838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3766370848351077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688454377433387,0.0,0.0,0.11712417916866001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470863339798933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080666652230824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27705417295127743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668585035146856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044586703863035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178986400199506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tacoburgerman,2020/02/19,"does anyone else have times of clarity and wonder what is wrong with me. i have times where like i kinda come to my senses and wonder wtf is wrong with me for sh
i ruined my arm but sometimes i want to and for short periods ill kinda understand how it can make normal people feel, especially when like recently for some stupid reason i put a gun to my head fast and dry fire and later ill see how crazy it is but feel like doing it again, i want to put a round in but i keep them locked so i dont do it on impulse.
i feel like 90% of the time im clouded and if im lucky the other ten is clarity.",2.567068376068377,3.0921613307692333,4.4756410256410275,88.70158119658122,74.15384615384616,7.623931623931623,21.367521367521373,7.793537801064563,0.6144957264957265,463,9,108,6,9,159,78,130,0.207,0.637,0.156,-0.8248,0,0,0,1,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,6,9,1,0,4,0,10,4,2,4,0,31,22,14,0,4,4,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,9,0,1,7,0,0,3,1,4,0,1,0,6,15,5,13,22,1,16,0,1,2,0,1,4,0,7,13,66,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495405731301403,0.1537961365497259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929865669952434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135433164644664,0.0,0.17591716709947566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539006294387836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22768661428008702,0.2144642627116368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15404685394974518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32426951454186603,0.0,0.0,0.13341659953803728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29332692174640285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001935334987968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706703780243338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406108245413584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017857770889965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543287509570217,0.14820655587917514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961100419979008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845365364916124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625751706741395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15626035731150312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17706682999040216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32555610222373604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32822359816490715,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IcicleBoner,2020/02/19,"Starting Vyvanse soon, what was your experience? For context, I am a 22 year old female (5'4"", 190 lbs) USA

I got diagnosed with depression & bipolar disorder 10 years ago and have been on and off various mood stabilizers and antidepressants since then with little to no success. I recently started seeing a new psychiatrist who wants to start me on Vyvanse for my low mood and lack of energy (as well as the \~70 lbs I've gained in the past year due to the worsening depression).

I've been reading a good bit about Vyvanse, and honestly I'm a bit scared about taking it and I'm not sure if it would be worth it. I'm adopted so I have no knowledge of family history of addiction and I understand stimulants can be quite addictive. I think I'm most worried about becoming addicted and needing to stay on the drugs forever to feel normal. I'm also worried about the ""comedowns"" because I've heard it can be pretty awful when the drug wears off.

I'd love to hear some of your experiences with Vyvanse and how it has affected you and whether or not it was worth it for you. Any other advice you have for me is also greatly appreciated.",5.31219178082192,6.44383574429224,6.5377899543378994,74.19408219178085,68.26940639269407,10.4062100456621,33.77808219178082,10.504223727775694,3.7987227397260286,904,42,165,25,15,305,132,219,0.134,0.736,0.129,0.2115,0,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,5,0,3,11,13,0,1,10,1,16,9,1,3,1,33,35,21,0,6,5,0,1,0,0,1,7,2,0,0,10,13,0,0,4,1,2,0,4,4,1,0,6,4,14,7,29,25,6,24,0,3,1,1,9,8,0,4,15,108,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38191392659156104,0.0,0.11411355889230422,0.10351615103436798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867737466990134,0.0,0.12652830307738372,0.0,0.07941266092410773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118644107439234,0.1289715032845307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549814299628513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20116046895946468,0.11852663935726372,0.0,0.0,0.13383705873679033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708495026710056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284614804109029,0.11008737370076216,0.0,0.059046180392513865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794737281828372,0.09339758336182756,0.1287475354103526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161665745642487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704166936864785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539619525258513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658898908543672,0.0,0.1127843753398365,0.0,0.0,0.11441709304693105,0.0,0.0,0.1225382749645938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147727626949087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880463462095778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12420717756592965,0.11680903759616255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530362987913655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169145853879064,0.0,0.09305649723732858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659950177375533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479670106754455,0.12446920900485706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006135139143647,0.0,0.08780209871335043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748262656992296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156942921550512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688783573303254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499693933747303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371863094651944,0.0,0.08295534000016977,0.0,0.0,0.2256025201856373
mentalhealth,chloe_leigh,2020/02/19,"[Academic] How do scores for personality vary across latitudinal distance from the equator and what effect does this have on mental wellbeing (18+) Hey everyone,

I am conducting research for my dissertation which focuses on mental well-being and personality based on latitudinal distance from the equator. I hope reach out through here would offer a diverse group of people from all over the world so I can collect as much data as possible.

I have a week or so to get as many participants as I can, I've tried everything with very little luck, I go to a small university so not much luck here.

You must be over 18 to take part and live outside of the UK to take part!

I would be ever so grateful if you could take part, all information pertaining to the study itself is given before taking part so you can decide whether or not you'd like to.

Link is attached if youd like to take part! 😊 or if the attachment doesn't work it is just below, thank you!!

[https://aber.onlinesurveys.ac.uk/using-goldbergs-1993-big-five-inventory-how-do-scores](https://aber.onlinesurveys.ac.uk/using-goldbergs-1993-big-five-inventory-how-do-scores)

NOTE: i am unfortunately not able to find any helplines/support services in international areas, hopefully this community or the internet will be a useful tool if anything in this study has caused any distress or upset. I have tried my best to include guidance in the participant information sheet but if that is not helpful please drop me a message and ill try to help.",9.746639610389607,9.779940125000008,8.972619047619046,64.32000000000004,58.73484848484848,11.785281385281387,38.175324675324674,11.20814326018867,4.408027922077921,1219,51,196,28,14,385,154,264,0.071,0.825,0.10400000000000001,0.7316,0,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,0,6,0,3,10,10,0,2,13,0,25,1,0,4,4,43,37,26,0,11,17,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,2,8,6,0,0,6,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,1,0,18,8,34,26,10,19,0,0,0,0,16,15,0,14,4,136,26,4,0.1061895556845966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14442507852109995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738495639189825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035949065725203,0.0,0.11143938731602472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090859249474278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478371949136254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292719577837832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605453258351318,0.0,0.10146867111006733,0.09543632550723803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705533010971573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055479660032919584,0.0,0.060349971634827325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235324159123772,0.0,0.0,0.2109403780458232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10375770613170493,0.1064298317932073,0.0937673231523454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765954235436627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21402819216005176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15612308351010729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5749647035487947,0.0,0.07361846739971625,0.18544124820337488,0.0,0.1165642440165964,0.0,0.11971276876045317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205026493877127,0.0,0.0,0.3992066521077692,0.0,0.0,0.0977650758576284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21628721353301333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171368151442044,0.0,0.0876175045097229,0.0,0.0,0.08517885631492525,0.0,0.09547716341341132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730726124989057,0.0,0.0,0.1508680272622873,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Omnidexicon,2020/02/19,"I think i wanna speak to a therapist but i cant ask my mom for one because she'll probably kill herself after i explain why i want one. I possess no empathy at all. I don't love anybody in my family and i wouldn't care if they all died. Im like this because of my moms ex. From the age of 2 all the way up to 15 (im 19 right now) all i saw was him abuse her physically, mentally, and emotionally. She had multiple chances to get him out of the picture but she thought that a horrible father figure was better than no father figure. I already tried to open up to her about how i feel (what i don't feel tbh) and she instantly made it all about her by asking if i still loved her. I fucking hate her. If i told her that i wanted a therapist because i cant feel anything due to her horrible taste in men and bad parenting skills then she would literally shoot herself in the face. Her dying will be inconvenient to the way that my life operates. She is actually a nice women but she is nowhere near a good mom(to me at least). My little sister seems to do okay.  If i could vent to someone in private for a bit then that would give me a chance to get some stuff off my chest.",2.4798380566801623,3.657275526315793,4.480809716599193,86.0918218623482,75.11336032388664,7.953036437246964,26.36032388663968,8.532816995589336,1.6889643724696364,913,33,202,17,19,314,140,247,0.217,0.693,0.08900000000000001,-0.9913,1,0,0,1,1,0,21.0,0,0,1,2,5,12,3,0,12,1,17,7,2,2,5,37,39,14,3,11,7,7,3,1,0,5,1,1,0,2,8,6,1,0,9,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,7,6,46,8,33,25,8,23,0,0,1,3,37,14,1,6,8,142,54,0,0.0,0.13510914066359708,0.11127867340350586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583702400534558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383852768850867,0.0,0.21320884423837394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521186337607014,0.2085383415818055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085193824479204,0.1244932877106054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162631096566395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104518371954698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366941928892628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12827052574258813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749911544092168,0.0,0.17297384656337897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542064298305312,0.11915390998881015,0.10938977768070483,0.0,0.09564453745938332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125828813185686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24634801404946566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615938885706487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805440948274585,0.055710220510213806,0.114289909041325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058364620685493,0.10789972961401292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149173225312414,0.0,0.0,0.4006583071421233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15454191697271638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661891687479407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294566199074078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738260930381899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038103481092303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661884866631637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106601306852033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305392298851982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647996219811873,0.0,0.07306702943317532,0.0,0.09052858159716914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896235572603682,0.0,0.07742016671140195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451792402932838,0.18102640991514574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102896042406548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162009963020081,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crocwithaglockthrow,2020/02/19,"I think I finally realized the missing part to why I have a hard time doing my work Hear me out, please.

For the longest time, I was subconsciously fighting my father. Over the years I became a pretty rough procrastinator, and my dad has constantly yelled at me to keep my grades up. I have a 98% grade average in middle school, but that dropped once I reached high school. My parents started fighting way more, and there was a whole ass month where there was constant fighting when my dad came home. My dad has practically equated my worth to my GPA, telling me I'll be going to Ivy League when I was 10 when I didn't even fucking know what that was. So these past two years I've been facing a rough burnout and realized the more my dad came home and lectured me for an hour, the more I didn't do shit...and now I finally realized that my grades are shit because I wanted to basically fuck over my father. Now I still have a hard time doing my work, but at least I know the huge cause. My mom tells me to just do it for myself, but that's hard to do when you've only been doing it to keep your dad happy your whole life because otherwise, he'd be a dick to you. Sorry for the pity party, does anybody have any tips?",7.034257759784076,5.447984028340085,7.056123481781378,81.1348195006748,64.9919028340081,10.176653171390011,32.72908232118757,8.841846274778883,2.367950337381916,953,30,205,12,12,306,128,247,0.147,0.778,0.076,-0.9524,1,0,0,0,6,0,25.0,0,3,0,3,13,9,6,0,15,0,25,7,4,1,0,21,39,12,0,1,4,9,5,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,8,7,0,2,6,0,1,3,2,8,0,1,11,7,38,1,20,25,7,36,0,2,0,4,19,11,5,0,20,133,46,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543152053781313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523540023544886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25373298197514704,0.0,0.1139485922018188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23973695793374405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706956366105132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326366997840986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430216967677686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050932611061208,0.0,0.0,0.06304016132715957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807971636752865,0.2980959651142439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250184099677828,0.0,0.0,0.11719635895833405,0.22252985286110247,0.0,0.10923692251962172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19718711884061174,0.0,0.0,0.12192088400078648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834827507957629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991180929375384,0.08853777050747097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812949517832848,0.0,0.08436202580348802,0.0,0.0,0.12316699009202085,0.12011892197218994,0.1058886625453553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176026845958035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284868347331292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245202244637413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277219629193083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12416934356516765,0.07851195028099417,0.0,0.08858334130611341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19390337974644767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107505191462284,0.0,0.0,0.194040477585227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835576361671477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542532595071393,0.08804560403269178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10009085647231862,0.2476833886850559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615066946656708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428616959960448
mentalhealth,ZebraSyndromeGaming,2020/02/19,"My baby momma is killing me My fiance/baby momma is killing me mentally. Everyday there is a new issue although 9/10 it's just her coming home and venting every amount of anger she had claimed at work towards me and my child. She won't harm us but she yells and screams and everything is a crime in her eyes. Out 1 yo is so happy to see her and all she can do is say she has a headache and pushes him away the poor boy cries and she yells at me as if it's my fault. 

The obvious thing to do would be to leave her but the last time I tried she tried to kill her self in our kitchen. Idk what to do and I feel trapped. On one hand I'll have her dead and my child motherless and on the other she might try to just up and take my kid away from me (again) and then call for me to have no rights. As many of you may know the laws favor the mother way more then the father so I really don't know what to do. I'm lost and so so so confused.",0.7772222222222211,2.1933781893203883,2.391779935275082,98.29850053937434,80.2135922330097,5.742826321467099,19.211434735706586,6.42735559955562,-0.2795471413160735,721,16,182,6,18,236,119,206,0.233,0.7,0.067,-0.9911,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,2,1,0,2,10,11,4,1,10,0,21,3,2,0,2,30,29,26,4,2,5,4,2,0,0,4,0,4,2,5,6,15,1,0,3,0,1,2,3,9,0,1,2,8,33,2,25,22,3,22,0,1,2,0,29,12,0,4,7,127,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28526805267698474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15501882429390873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13077411302846173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16676028838948873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790964174280267,0.0,0.1364404198339054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676159931067404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16160857208875573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228158092820954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845412455894844,0.0,0.0,0.5038783020795832,0.0,0.16686574610187904,0.12374847794037105,0.0,0.1607488532583472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165722654215715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539153260551907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299256462045216,0.1610504100282634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466226768740969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287293376761833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972557830343945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964812282997967,0.0,0.12072839650792855,0.0,0.0,0.12097591252646556,0.0,0.15837486260206904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414505519691433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085831737256988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852382518818508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092147362370084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18261326275650405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050269753466478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052222646967387,0.0,0.0,0.10784414042438382,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hy-phenated,2020/02/19,"I get irrationally mad or annoyed when someone so much as looks at me. It happens when someone compliments me. When someone flirts with me. Even if someone makes eye contact and smiles. I immediately dislike that person, even if I thought they were attractive.",5.050000000000002,8.351025111111113,4.964444444444447,75.50000000000001,75.66666666666667,7.155555555555559,37.888888888888886,8.238735603445708,3.7713555555555565,210,13,32,4,5,65,34,45,0.19899999999999998,0.614,0.188,-0.1531,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,6,5,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,7,6,9,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,7,3,3,4,1,4,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,3,3,24,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169513249021045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253568131070115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121748766093451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20148606147418194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16015934257153394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638078702766116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20950312132020893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8131889893342472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19048262008665776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SimplisticPines,2020/02/19,"Life isn't going wrong anymore, but I still want to die. Hello, so growing up I've always had mental issues with depression/anxiety because of being bullied, abused physically/mentally and also be raped as a child. 

 But let's not to dive into that stuff, I'm making this post cause now I (20M) have a decent living situation, an okay job, and good friends. 

 With all that I still have to fake being happy towards everyone because I've had suicidal attempts in the past so I don't want them to worry, but now even two-three years out of schooling my thoughts have gotten extremely worse, I am constantly in this state of darkness always thinking when should be the day I try again, I don't like having these thoughts and I feel selfish that I do cause I know people will miss me, but I don't have the motivation to keep this lifestyle up and keep living.",4.650369261477046,5.944654790419161,5.453068862275451,80.75389471057886,69.95808383233533,7.961876247504987,28.88672654690619,8.344100000000001,2.084980439121756,678,25,126,10,12,221,109,167,0.275,0.611,0.114,-0.9898,1,0,0,0,1,1,19.0,0,0,1,2,10,10,1,0,6,1,20,2,0,4,1,28,34,13,2,3,5,0,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,1,8,8,0,2,6,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,5,1,14,5,18,22,1,21,0,1,0,1,4,7,0,0,11,86,22,3,0.0,0.16741995279163788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11299928568797148,0.2351494319244931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080957650526152,0.0,0.1401337729368092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17227296949904145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903124820079029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15269743561969726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112820306963866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664933255049611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332874352132872,0.0,0.0,0.13502026851861898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714466173633001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916969770864632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030527340193938,0.11851754712952875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15041877600704254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14748274278628332,0.14022058975840665,0.2511917031375644,0.0,0.0,0.07765597134402548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14449103133044966,0.09980589386793083,0.06903309755373745,0.0,0.2495447907575025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432028851761434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239934188483527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488889966096784,0.09796112561143694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532840902122312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14300532890655546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15882954730685322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256881737826375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16175716607695872,0.1545616279329784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09054071810570977,0.0,0.2243562616541104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593489080221766,0.0,0.1380316775643674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16668734905725885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434992016716592,0.14399897204013104,0.0,0.15449172913726675,0.0,0.09099395777310937
mentalhealth,castcool,2020/02/19,"I can't get out I am a high school senior and for a variety of reasons, I want to leave for college. I am extremely unhappy in my city, extremely unhappy in my home, and extremely unhappy as a whole. Whenever I bring this up to my parents, they get offended. They then accuse me of badmouthing them in therapy and saying that I paint myself as a victim. My family is quite normal, as far as normal goes in my community, but I can't stand living in this house.

​

The local community college is giving me TONS of financial aid, which is their vocalized reason for wanting me to stay home, but they tend to keep things from me. For example, after attempted suicide at 15, I was not allowed to even touch the wheel of a car, therefore I got my license this year. Their rationale was, ""We can't afford a car."" The real reason, they told me afterwards, was that they thought I'd ram myself into a pole and kill myself. Totally understandable, but be upfront.

​

I have had THREE different therapists tell me that I need to go away to college, one being a very close friend of my mother's. They say that my family creates an unhealthy living environment that is detrimental to who I am as a person and of course would cause me to go to the lengths I did in the past. However, when any of them say something my parents don't agree with, they're written off and told, ""You don't know what you're talking about.""

​

I don't know if I'm sounding like an immature brat who just wants to get out of the house or if I have a real problem. All I know is I'm horribly depressed, haven't felt true joy in months (that could be because my doctor took me off all medication months ago to ""see what happens""), and can't stand the idea of being in my own home. Please help.",7.663746218487398,6.231104820000002,8.150268907563028,73.29908403361345,63.65714285714286,11.663865546218489,36.588235294117645,10.718039707386858,3.787895798319328,1397,56,269,30,17,466,180,350,0.14300000000000002,0.7979999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.9836,6,0,1,0,0,2,57.0,1,1,10,2,4,9,3,0,19,0,29,2,0,7,4,51,57,20,2,11,8,3,2,1,1,1,2,4,3,1,15,13,0,1,11,0,0,6,9,5,0,2,12,7,50,4,50,39,6,39,0,1,1,0,28,20,0,3,11,189,65,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423714881404972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722213018225442,0.305287314599336,0.05695120488768327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786835787295868,0.0,0.0,0.0510517283223533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603180175714105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686560297333713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07213164091026614,0.0,0.0,0.08749836355121743,0.0,0.08571916470046524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055314466021832584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15789947099671509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08041078004499201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06470314831934511,0.0,0.1312639128046812,0.08033827979600479,0.09519132368797822,0.0,0.06698056511589791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740576806644938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056134216517694506,0.0884838831769367,0.2520168588719944,0.0,0.0,0.193266853893658,0.0,0.09454078860577908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443866918123515,0.09265425431685126,0.0,0.13807638760249155,0.0,0.0,0.0886765617975869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040914822003849265,0.0,0.1479012395160624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436684454608126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369298862116896,0.0,0.0,0.06209774614069179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410963271955378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05674950634877746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859834837775444,0.0,0.07994651139082179,0.0,0.07312512916179716,0.0,0.09192965946834827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013509367623127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907582664731865,0.0,0.19064609000347546,0.0,0.2583192843488949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19979823613024086,0.0,0.08475699027207942,0.06673595341878764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447295446302052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926374386343651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160622541354604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731310728031861,0.07319904881685654,0.0,0.09577262051866267,0.09723735879003137,0.05563815002098561,0.0,0.0,0.06648619891264014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004874325828772,0.09304660798920504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718415162977028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691004983646484,0.14818942200143248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350114723729566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059491855705377614,0.0,0.305287314599336,0.05393067554030079
mentalhealth,MediocreKnowledge8,2020/02/19,"share a statement about your self-concept what is an idea you have of yourself or the way you exist in the world?

what is a conviction you hold about who you are?

​

for example, for me:

*i cannot be sure of anything outside of my immediate perception*

*i hold opinions of myself shared by no one*

*i repeat myself compulsively just to be sure the thing is said*

*i become immensely fragile in the moments during which i want to be strongest*

*i am terrified by the realization that no one is really in charge*

​

i am curious to know how others frame their sense of self and how they might phrase a statement like those above.",2.4164738292011023,5.265600619834714,3.451867768595044,84.68204407713498,84.12396694214875,6.532451790633607,25.422038567493114,7.793537801064563,1.8376309641873283,509,21,92,10,15,163,79,121,0.1,0.816,0.084,-0.4559,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,5,2,0,5,5,0,0,9,0,13,0,0,2,2,17,16,4,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,8,1,0,2,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,2,18,5,17,11,0,7,0,0,0,0,12,4,0,3,3,74,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3726094425650652,0.4178693414272098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14149789620829714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18990217515300425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19410746131666434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944976852867682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400471739776569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824088084904375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23303174790022355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101537804156791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635611643993652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3587568634815685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3241164055194795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423408046618586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141891460424304,0.136483685284156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4178693414272098,0.0
mentalhealth,aPretentious_dHead,2020/02/20,"I tidied my room today. So, like the title says, I cleaned and tidied my room today for the first time in almost 2 months. It’s a very big thing for me. My room has always subconsciously represented my mental health and state, since I was like 13. I’m now 20 and it still does. I feel better today and look forward to tomorrow. I can’t wait to see if I actually sleep tonight!!",0.7702453102453113,3.114920974025978,2.9180952380952405,89.37968253968252,86.01298701298703,5.500144300144299,17.646464646464647,6.937597516519254,0.10678759018758964,293,7,62,4,9,99,55,77,0.0,0.8740000000000001,0.126,0.843,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,3,0,3,2,1,0,0,10,8,6,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,3,4,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,4,11,3,5,7,0,17,0,0,2,0,1,6,0,2,13,34,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.2045660118660525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099114666780336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17442671175180127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18539831725787398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834462684143081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599386467130588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17830887966781514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228240240036147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048266263676316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17603414132278528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21125501990213588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673225159436348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667040478098237,0.0,0.0,0.16704582259836884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17340587401689295,0.0,0.2097786966538174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740863761395372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926706762970278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222353680934587,0.0,0.5961065259419922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17296448166169956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,inquisitive_snowmonk,2020/02/20,Does anyone ever feel trapped in a digital world? I get depressed and get trapped staring at my phone screen all day which only worsens my mood. Anyone else do this?,3.792150537634409,6.372695741935487,3.6658064516129047,87.18537634408602,75.45161290322581,5.423655913978496,29.68817204301075,6.42735559955562,1.5611204301075272,132,6,23,1,3,40,27,31,0.35200000000000004,0.648,0.0,-0.9268,0,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,4,1,5,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,0,2,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48334284411311207,0.35413715275367225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229017327304504,0.0,0.2976892449556695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30246175264678393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28872818830654806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126406864161161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17476011016961476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611531601539828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628659820750227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shower-of-roses,2020/02/20,"I don't know what to say when people (like my boyfriend) ask how they can help me. I have been struggling with depression and anxiety since middle school. Ive seen therapists on and off since then. I have recently entered college and it's been worse. I talk to my boyfriend and my family about and everytime I do, i get asked ""is there anything I can do?"". I never know what to say and I feel bad because I can't come up with anything. 

Does anyone have suggestions for what I can tell my family and my boyfriend for when they ask how they can help?",3.0929292929292918,4.763290636363639,3.7657575757575774,89.83308080808081,74.45454545454545,7.7979797979797985,25.858585858585855,8.515128840125781,1.6095555555555556,430,15,92,8,9,136,61,110,0.14,0.8109999999999999,0.05,-0.8677,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,0,6,4,0,1,0,0,15,0,0,2,1,16,24,12,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,10,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,3,4,21,1,11,21,0,11,0,1,1,0,13,4,0,0,6,64,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12834853388356698,0.0,0.0,0.11731320293307465,0.0,0.276131464797056,0.0,0.4705450302565792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14008633739098494,0.10227497373374428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452456570713634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450562051273722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14682231215340766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163294325079715,0.0,0.08483282009296364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765627645694579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249140512407583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844111111005792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196710441108164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939955026049849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631507343226573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16565901510612538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266845152603404,0.0,0.16979873627574293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775728455445319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753963858176619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13485236455779112,0.1466440224669356,0.0,0.0,0.1948014032628681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17097854789311598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,juuuda,2020/02/20,"idk how to deal anymore i’ve been diagnosed with a dissociative disorder which has been ruining my life for the last three years and I ended up going to the mental hospital around last week and they treated me for depression instead; putting me on a strong antipsychotic in hopes to keep me mellow. but now i’m home, stuck without a memory of who my friends are and having “episodes” where i lose time; what do i do?",6.116500000000002,6.75137265,6.432500000000001,77.44250000000002,66.25,10.4,33.5,10.355215969177356,3.429825,332,14,63,8,5,107,62,80,0.154,0.7490000000000001,0.09699999999999999,-0.4118,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,2,5,7,0,0,5,0,7,2,0,1,0,10,12,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,3,0,9,4,12,9,0,14,0,3,0,0,4,5,0,1,7,45,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264882583050176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20330362651689976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354462858374079,0.1967004637025358,0.2317974803227864,0.0,0.0,0.2617394128208661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20227391552831725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644322403897708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979170634130532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22908038864962935,0.22682953165671155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20299164916494608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.372314882057136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130917334907086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554950414880528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301499363884282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22958159928350924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13316825419892042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831899635713334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201469294337444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706706727724475
mentalhealth,xharry998,2020/02/20,"Is it normal to feel angry when a friend talks about their mental health? I have depression and whenever a friend posts something on social media about it for some reason it just makes me feel annoyed as if they’re looking for attention and it puts me in a bad mood, is this normal?",4.798818181818183,6.208236109090913,5.005227272727275,83.66784090909091,69.72727272727272,7.6818181818181825,24.65909090909091,8.07648339933343,1.3972727272727272,226,6,42,3,4,71,42,55,0.21100000000000002,0.6890000000000001,0.1,-0.7941,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,4,6,1,0,3,0,3,1,0,2,0,12,7,5,0,3,2,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,3,4,2,8,7,1,5,0,1,1,0,5,2,0,2,1,29,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010449869310891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20738732362148105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434957401922176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720589907701076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25594264736747885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20219832380589128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16072551308452326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426541271983535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4718353427250061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23060497711249425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420549119810362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475665526015089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24544945917939806,0.0,0.18536765978593506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935334478370929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MeasureTwiceCutOnc,2020/02/20,"What is everyone's opinion to a zero tolerance rule with therapists and suicide? If I told a mental health professional I was considering suicide, they would hospitalize me more or less on the spot..Wouldn't that reduce the people speaking out about these feelings? F-that, I'm not being hospitalized More or less explained in the title.
My local mental health walk in clinic has this rule.. Probably the doctors walk in clinic, ect.
Why the heck would I out myself and make my life 100x harder then it already is.",6.129308755760372,8.083792806451612,6.593579109062983,71.45322580645164,67.17204301075269,8.755145929339479,31.565284178187408,9.23628265651192,3.1314251920122884,413,17,64,8,7,134,68,93,0.10099999999999999,0.875,0.024,-0.8466,0,0,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,7,0,7,6,0,1,0,15,12,6,2,3,4,0,1,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,5,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,2,8,0,9,7,4,10,0,0,0,0,4,7,1,4,1,48,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22302155584853686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20685715343405936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19311450103834427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218745684903284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4296441196555665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427486821531063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490282351467855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40733703403184185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011017828037056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21789718120510015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4421275707037326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346528144206593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19311450103834427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18236314510418272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871310276232177,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,daisybea123,2020/02/20,"I’m struggling Since Christmas I’ve been gradually going downhill. I’ve stopped eating, stopped attending my university classes, I have no more clean pairs of underwear, my house is so disgusting now that it smells, and honestly I just can’t make myself do anything about any of it. I don’t even feel any emotion most the time, until I see my boyfriend or call my mum and then I just start crying. My family is 4 hours away though and my boyfriend is so exhausted from working long shifts in a mental health hospital everyday without even getting paid (student nurse life for ya). They all want to help but really they’re just unable to due to circumstance, and I don’t know what they could do anyway. I just feel like I’ve hit a dead end. I don’t actively want to die but I have absolutely no motivation to live anymore. When I talk to people I can hold it together and think logically and think of practical solutions but as soon as I’m left to my own devices I’m unable to put any of them in place. I just don’t know what to do.",4.208074433656957,5.478557509708743,5.289300970873788,81.60149190938513,70.99029126213591,9.182653721682847,29.75275080906149,9.558583805096642,2.6644657605177984,821,33,165,19,15,271,124,206,0.132,0.7709999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.8458,0,0,0,0,0,2,17.0,0,1,3,2,15,5,1,1,3,0,16,4,0,2,1,33,34,18,2,3,10,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,6,6,1,3,8,0,1,3,8,3,0,0,2,4,24,2,23,30,4,22,0,0,1,0,8,5,0,2,15,103,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085893619975239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001092861990256,0.0,0.0,0.12447546375965304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421153155450115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445507425881444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207701329691816,0.0,0.1661538386962975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15698572939521782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547784480415332,0.0,0.1701490163134604,0.13397294027985548,0.0,0.0,0.1998138091789826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259603787346953,0.0,0.15296488766134184,0.10806136525675124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902797800635875,0.0,0.08596549128476201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607840788976731,0.0,0.0,0.10138750705151164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489622728295432,0.1745356551452898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16625891289533495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16434624397650538,0.0,0.10684058886803173,0.0738988100621126,0.0,0.13356682336196224,0.13386181552703671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096833740860407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524361833934186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486579440238956,0.0,0.15803624779813952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205975426850024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690209727172344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205359648282231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251252141860601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070637865693828,0.0,0.0,0.25292305362281303,0.0,0.15813153696531046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157839838899673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193844737300764,0.14861382000671008,0.0,0.08820189454663988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843610071459906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14581084937613534,0.0,0.1101202952246475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Starmoon85,2020/02/20,"Struggled with my mental health for years but the last 6 months have been a struggle. Long term relationship ended horribly, and my Dad passed away. Can’t see anywhere out of this black hole Firstly my gf and I broke up after 3 years and she had someone new within 5 weeks. She also wanted to cut all communication and act like I no longer exist. A few weeks later my Dad started to take ill health and he passed away a few weeks ago. Him and I were extremely close. I went to tell my ex as her and my Dad really were fond of each other and I thought she deserved to know. I literally just spent 2 mins telling her about Dad, and didn’t mention “us” or anything beyond my Dads passing. A few hours later she messaged saying I’m no longer part of her life and she doesn’t care what happens in my life and that if I see or contact her again she’ll get the police onto me. Needless to say it’s been a terrible month for me, losing my Dad and my ex reacting in such a way. I only have acquaintances rather than friends and I’m not close with my extended family. I see no light at the end of the tunnel and im in a deep depression. I don’t want antidepressants as I was on them years ago and they didn’t agree with me. Don’t know what else I should do to end this pain",1.7860227272727265,3.6257010113636383,3.2712121212121232,91.2018181818182,78.6590909090909,6.36969696969697,21.60606060606061,7.333567415737692,0.5676469696969697,993,28,220,13,24,326,153,264,0.16399999999999998,0.7609999999999999,0.075,-0.9775,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,2,2,7,12,1,2,11,0,17,6,0,1,1,37,34,22,0,5,7,8,0,1,2,2,6,2,0,0,7,22,0,0,3,0,1,5,10,8,0,1,11,7,40,4,32,21,7,46,0,3,4,0,33,15,0,3,26,141,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054380292345768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09266773844272896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535786843464653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177427286144744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814552708288452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980570638009716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680134997847163,0.0,0.3079010182523258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923963492994568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856592045884126,0.0,0.0,0.08952719419016207,0.0,0.06054156619924291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024706916176572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463461726322935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411666512553105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125168318874541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736723417695425,0.09445618251243598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16369637049804278,0.05661222536986441,0.0,0.0,0.10254854256335467,0.0,0.12963804259704248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11677795030172765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18498571499297434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11191586803964616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813057733477228,0.12330255322296099,0.0,0.0,0.12548477637199976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742345291480124,0.0,0.0,0.12440979880270428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18430195901854252,0.0,0.0,0.2770197192739887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09818320562331112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201917201538883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24228206655124254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712596991913753,0.0,0.20256527319560266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919943309657783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938718247856988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13669590537769372,0.09197870536282282,0.2788514582807081,0.0,0.0,0.10742023351833803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22386524553981715
mentalhealth,squish-squish-beep,2020/02/20,I can’t do it anymore Every day for my entire life I’ve been struggling on. No friends to talk to. If I try to talk to anyone about how my feel they give me this uncomfortable look and change the subject so I don’t talk anymore. I don’t think I can do it anymore. I just want the pain to stop. I seem fine to everyone. I just wish I had someone to talk to who would take me seriously. I don’t think anyone will unless I do something drastic. That’s the only way to get some help.,0.6625961538461524,2.4425769903846195,2.7621538461538457,93.78284615384615,81.98076923076924,5.313846153846153,21.93846153846154,6.2581,0.1831107692307694,373,12,87,3,10,126,64,104,0.14800000000000002,0.7390000000000001,0.113,-0.5574,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,1,3,0,12,2,0,1,0,15,22,5,0,4,4,0,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,2,16,2,13,18,1,4,0,0,1,0,9,1,0,3,2,57,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4757027595954869,0.22359714628192406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691420676092666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311560819996594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347139408596146,0.15278142922428326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084502003860428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353036049257995,0.0,0.08353575206984079,0.15338073837725535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10717067380052214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293480065955334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342670514642698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160329704356955,0.17013387928739154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555754826259432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13547399641725294,0.12309087754942225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367492142138793,0.0,0.1671513962472147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202171314507634,0.5140530329172475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20490168575358367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855458880395563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430706849417644,0.12691297581577576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838652268375537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358103233843116,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kmorales1029,2020/02/20,"Waking up Today I woke up, my body hurts everyday and I feel tired. I’m currently unemployed and I’m just tired. I started my routine as usual (I try) and I just broke down and got depressed and tired. My mind wants me to say the most outrageous things. I feel like I’m going to explode. I’m so extremely sad with no one to talk to that I don’t know why I’m sad anymore. I feel like I’m losing it and I’m
Just making shit up that doesn’t make sense, I wanna say things that I don’t know why and I just want to go to the hospital I’m just scared of being trapped. I’m just so tired I feel like I got no sleep but I slept 9 hours.",-1.3322456964006264,0.6141002042253554,1.364131455399061,99.33341158059471,92.73239436619718,4.845696400625979,16.339593114240998,6.42735559955562,-0.4747805946791863,487,12,123,6,18,167,70,142,0.24100000000000002,0.7120000000000001,0.047,-0.9640000000000001,3,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,8,12,2,1,2,0,4,9,5,2,0,28,30,11,0,3,7,0,4,3,0,0,4,2,0,0,6,8,0,0,6,0,0,2,5,9,0,1,4,6,18,3,14,25,1,12,0,6,0,0,3,4,1,1,9,64,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561105282429236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14068887795582408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909065450725246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25616907729403315,0.2714542597211158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14396572258007925,0.0,0.20260051194035664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473296508035812,0.0,0.13559038732048914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13921623765906466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856366216734324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14169829991575147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909086931857667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788883106907611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858269784580833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20144761322295499,0.12680710785160124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001298001480466,0.0,0.0,0.12674982491769918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08964943470492755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180318702664827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682923644815674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5823005818454342,0.12005730960077846,0.0,0.0,0.08599270813670326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394962825195212,0.0,0.14941275731592635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285789276603301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nymphtenshi,2020/02/20,"just stopped caring? I don’t really feel depressed all the time anymore I just feel numbish but I still want to cry sometimes. I’ve stopped showering, dressing. I don’t leave my house and haven’t for like a year or two. I’m just kind of done. I don’t want to kill myself but i do want to die. I’ve kind of just stopped taking care of myself the last year - two. I was in therapy for all my stuff starting when i was 5 - 18 but I got sick of it. Medicine made things so much worse for me and I’d been on it about the same amount. we would change it but the results were never better. I don’t feel like living but Im good at convincing others I do.. even myself but it’s not for people or for anything important. It’s for things I have no use for anyway.. I obsess over things but in the end I don’t need it or even want it when I have it. I don’t laugh at anything for real anymore.. I mean sometimes but it’s insanely rare but I do put on a fake laugh when I feel it’s necessary. I don’t even know who it’s for. I feel horrible but I also feel really hollow. I don’t know what to do. I’m not even sure why I’m writing this as if Reddit would be helpful for anyone. I don’t know anyone who’s gone through what I have. I do have feelings though. They are really strong but I’m just don’t passionate about the things I talk about or the things I do or want to do. I am great at convincing others I am though but even as I’m speaking I’m just thinking “why am I even talking about this? what difference does me saying anything make”. I’m not lonely but I do want to talk to others when they are near me but not for connecting. I have adhd and a number of other things wrong with me. Anyways thx for tuning in.  #cantwaittohearyourjudgementalcomments 💗",0.22154857653517013,2.3535422546916926,2.2360379165070867,94.84925156389635,86.23860589812332,5.160960040852803,18.53242691178348,6.5431188927421005,-0.1129197753095874,1363,36,314,15,42,454,149,373,0.14800000000000002,0.6729999999999999,0.179,0.8557,1,2,0,0,0,2,35.0,1,0,2,2,27,22,1,1,10,0,37,2,0,4,4,70,72,33,2,10,30,0,7,2,0,2,1,2,1,0,29,5,0,3,12,0,0,2,17,6,0,2,8,9,45,16,42,61,5,27,0,2,0,1,12,10,0,6,17,221,74,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741490794226376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482135056895542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16077376713991465,0.11335404768320548,0.0,0.20010931279381686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168843669798675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528627455231865,0.0,0.0857476864791576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903744153083433,0.0,0.0,0.06981437974818876,0.0,0.08412449457608323,0.08468743956496293,0.0,0.0,0.07093363302973821,0.08294957745794405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179255038871038,0.0,0.0,0.32122478465897875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868944119436887,0.057907223608457764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798686756542624,0.06482878456303134,0.08936576232175089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05433087975509519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935290349713172,0.0,0.0,0.0875556004089581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967769503828478,0.16881703672715012,0.13364062201677254,0.06607237235888608,0.0,0.08582778766674833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920083016716006,0.0,0.07157492308852083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669820799466381,0.054106257845275216,0.0,0.0,0.08829496773761254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05958631066188826,0.06010282832697705,0.06251624891181998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05619480182310898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148479497137448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226074963113506,0.15578180235396316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445987620313821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16033513105935435,0.0,0.057372647611021274,0.0,0.06473232172647685,0.20330214855797168,0.0,0.0,0.09279101107124453,0.0,0.0,0.07639537749525671,0.0,0.06094486748782647,0.19545193098594354,0.0,0.0,0.09269588233389907,0.0,0.3231044976961516,0.051938130346251575,0.15927642013384608,0.0,0.04726505923802207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836205877845316,0.0,0.0,0.07000732749824203,0.0,0.0,0.2868575413428629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628288857732671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260413144519684,0.11516130657020868,0.08862323751376493,0.0,0.1043962570304162
mentalhealth,bbuddy2k13,2020/02/20,"Does it seem that I have Paranoid Schizophrenia? Or could it just be thoughts that could be controlled with professional help? To keep it as short as I can, and to give the best insight based on substance misuse, suppressed feelings, and a traumatic event... I will go event by event pretty much that explains these thoughts and fearful almost beliefs (as I can come to reality with my anxiety getting the best of me most of the time, which I remind myself of frequently).

I grew up in a well environment. The traumatic experience I’ve endured, is the loss of my younger brother, whilst I was in elementary school years. He was diagnosed with cancer as I was in 1st grade, and passed away when I was in 5th grade. I had believed and held firmly in hopes that he was going to live. My parents then had my younger sisters and I into counseling to then prepare us for his invulnerable death. 

The PTSD I suffer from this is catastrophic thoughts. I suffer from fearing the worst in many situations. For example, as I grew up, I would be so worried at medical appointments, especially the typical check up. I feared and worried heavily on whether they had checked my body, heart, lungs or blood pressure, that something was going to be wrong. 

When I say “wrong” I meant that something was going to come up as something fatal or serious. Although clearly that is a realistic thought, but very unlikely given I never had experienced any symptoms or abnormal issues prior to the visits.

- This past me I am about to be describing is essential to know these thoughts stem from a person I had used to be. 

I am absolutely a much better person today. To continue, I fear as if these people know something about my past self, based on 1 sided stories or just had seen the way I have acted back at a time.  

To keep it short. In the past I was careless, rude, inconsiderate and relative like words to mostly girls in the past. 

These few girls I had always known personally. I hardly ever initiated an issue with them, however when they had started an argument with me, and initiated an always verbal issue, I most definitely pressed that issue to lengths of it being inappropriate/and unnecessary. 

I never have ever threatened a girl, told them to end their life somehow, physically harmed them or got other people to harass them either. 

I really just called them terrible names and sometimes brought in personal matters if they had done so. This type of behavior was portrayed from 8th to a little part of 10th grade, as most people knew to just not fuck with me wrong. I was never a general bully though, I guess you could say my behavior was verbal bullying to those personal to me. 

As you know, word about someone who is well known can quickly travel, especially in high school. I had been for how strong I was known to be physically in size/pound for pound and also for the rude persona I had. I was also a very likable person too. I was and still am always there for friends or people in need of talking or sometimes small favors. Though bystanders mostly never see the good in those portrayed as a bad person by their friends.

I had preferred to suppress my feelings or not talk of them throughout most of my life up until a year ago, a bit after halfway through Junior year is when I really started to talk more openly. 

This form of how I suppressed myself is probably partially, may explain these angry verbal outbursts of inconsiderate word play. I controlled my physical actions very well.

Really though I had resorted to self medication with my parents Ambien. This habit that no longer continues, had begun sometime from the summer into 8th grade, up until my accidental overdose in the very beginning of my Junior year. 

I also smoked marijuana throughout most of high school. I started using it the summer into sophomore year, and the frequency of my use had became even more as time went on. 

During the middle of Junior year. I was on the wrestling team, and when I got injured. I couldn’t participate which heavily depressed me. As it made me feel worthless, a failure, and such. I couldn’t lift weights which was also a passion of mine to. I could only deadlift. 

Due to my prolonged suppression of feelings and irrational behavior, I would literally (very sad to admit) take the bar, and deadlift to scrape the living fuck out of my shins in the school weight room. Like this was so unnecessary. I was bleed so bad, but at that time, I didn’t care. I would then sometimes walk around after that class to another, in public where people could most certainly see, with the blood still up and down my shins. I literally did this for the stupidest reasons. To scare people into avoiding any negative interaction with me, to show people not to fuck with me. Although in reality I was self mutilating myself as someone would do with cutting. In reality this was just my mental illness starting to unfold in the minds of those who knew what mental illness could look like. 

These actions had obviously spread in rumors and talk, as I would idiotically fucking show off my shin scrapes from dead lift sessions to the media (instagram story or snap story). Boy did people have reasonable concerns. 

I committed these actions too with a bad coping mechanism with suppressive feelings, and the serious misuse of marijuana where the marijuana literally altered my mind.

Needless to say, shortly after these events, I was admitted into an inpatient hospital twice within a one month span. I firmly believe that these psychotic behaviors were heavily due to the heavy marijuana misuse, and I will put a link at the end of this.

To keep it short, again. The last hospitalization had changed my meds from Cymbalta (50mg) for depression, to Venlafaxine, which then caused a manic high to low switch. Which led to a bipolar diagnosis from a psychologist, a month later. 

After the last hospitalization, I became very passive. Avoided any negative interactions. Felt ashamed, embarrassed, and full of hatred towards my past wrongdoings. I did the only thing I could, I changed for myself, my family and friends. 

I do not think I am bipolar at all at all. Before the hospitalizations, I never endured any highs, lows, mania or psychosis. I guess you could consider the small timely events that led up to the initial hospitalization can be perceived as a low. The only manic state I have ever experienced was induced from the medication that discharged me with, that I had stopped shortly after. After I stopped the medication, the high went into a very bad low with much anxiety and moderate depression. 

This manic state went down during the summer, in June of 2019. When that was the last time I touched any substance aside from nicotine. 

When I quit smoking in June, due to the depression yet again becoming major from it whilst causing anorexia. 

I had became very hostile, angry, agitative for almost 2 months, then became to my opinion of the normal I have became today. The “normal” in August 2019 when those bad emotions from the withdrawal of THC had become very minimal, up until now where I feel to be the best I had ever been. 

- Maybe I’m having catastrophic like thinking as to I may fear having a form of paranoid schizophrenia, with reasoning in this case. Is this maybe as simple as that I just need some professional help with to become more in control with these thoughts/fears?

- I wouldn’t call these fears delusional beliefs. They almost a belief, although I also have the other 1/5 of my mind knowing that I am just not even considering that this people could be from somewhere else / don’t even know me / or any other logical consideration that could be better than what I partially assume.

- As today, I proudly haven’t used any substances in almost a year. I cope very well and have a great time talking about my feelings with a good friend of mine. I also relieve stress through music, driving and the gym.

- Here is what I experience on a daily basis, as you mostly know the essential now, for where these reasons stem from to these thoughts:

- At 17 years old, about to be 18 and graduated. I struggle with these catastrophic and intuitively emotionally/or logically based thoughts daily. 

-Some days are worse than others. Really I have fears and almost beliefs that people (usually around my age and especially women) are judging me or do not like me from who I was.

- This is especially at work. I work at the local Walmart in this larger town I have always lived in. I work in the fruits and veggies area, so always around other shoppers. 

- I fear and feel as if these people around my age (again especially girls), just know me from my past somehow. I feel this way when they just see me. Walk the other direction. Sometimes I even here them talking, not exactly what they are saying. Sometimes I may here a key word and then think, are they talking about me? 

- In traffic, I feel as if the person next or across to me, may know me somehow from my past. I also have catastrophic thought that the person behind me driving may be following me. I don’t assume this, as I’m more alert to if they follow me. Sometimes I’ll turn into other streets and such, on my way home to see if they are or if I’m just too much on edge.

- As time goes on, I do talk to myself or others about how I am really just overthinking and honestly this past month these thoughts have slowly began to become less frequent lately. 

- As this month I started to realize this is all my anxiety based on reasonable thoughts, however that’s some good news.

- This is mostly in public places, obviously. I really just genuinely fear the judgement and more so a misperception of who I am today compared to who I was honestly. I have changed so much and I hate to know that some people don’t believe that. 

— Thanks for reading and for any insightful input. I also do see a therapist too as of this month.

(https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC2811144/#idm140143961871792title)",7.070985715659872,8.083887522676992,7.190703924586384,71.51095248172376,64.25995575221239,9.939138130050019,34.30580992689496,9.971965246562196,3.5606272162370143,7923,336,1310,165,115,2551,597,1808,0.158,0.763,0.08,-0.9994,4,2,5,1,0,0,238.0,1,4,18,16,92,90,11,17,94,0,145,31,5,21,18,294,244,132,3,31,46,4,16,5,4,13,17,4,2,18,99,73,4,16,65,8,2,28,23,56,4,2,80,30,193,34,265,125,40,265,4,13,7,5,87,110,4,57,127,1005,292,22,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02317519758902128,0.0,0.13089786982602347,0.0,0.0,0.16725963788025125,0.10877007040348544,0.0,0.0,0.1422312626268433,0.027414404337616813,0.060000573484865365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309528953652127,0.0,0.0,0.024563274764727742,0.02010322547726932,0.10914630039688612,0.0,0.11549656907084035,0.022246732662537183,0.08836645951528081,0.08230996787378086,0.046244724373458085,0.028542623358157725,0.029040239407637405,0.0,0.0,0.05339216837081934,0.0,0.02665568730975813,0.053714455269702255,0.08297108242705696,0.045041713438117914,0.0,0.0,0.08796860901472829,0.20873963851947708,0.0,0.0,0.016860803757859782,0.0,0.0900716181707333,0.026535745960601573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022878908087281453,0.02675452641405669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021840069445696383,0.02940863215641205,0.046311885957010274,0.0,0.0,0.06907181647280958,0.0945954649308941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05114795997626628,0.024646363027200864,0.29419419562669474,0.13219259833368255,0.0,0.02510246885286273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079557315373535,0.09667932342937932,0.01365923109994593,0.025079835877022828,0.05943325600381535,0.06578537829238706,0.041819704985530434,0.028824000336370826,0.05760142284190677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023420009080130026,0.025811919960872957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030980924996350943,0.0350477242212262,0.13811356637670952,0.026224698341403303,0.02596702440433316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915073489993678,0.0,0.06971432338518466,0.0,0.0,0.12931319222999674,0.06393287653857405,0.02949172222184505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03693275042631948,0.06386351708050708,0.02620329085522856,0.06925724864578604,0.0,0.021954488223503103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024738211990825827,0.0,0.02650604867189413,0.05253059378178155,0.0,0.029040239407637405,0.10534985912323408,0.05269427636872882,0.0,0.07919436829203436,0.0,0.12520799129785484,0.0,0.09609473437811956,0.03877108858930354,0.10081984044264997,0.0,0.02780458340143526,0.0,0.05123140133067157,0.0,0.0,0.02743387100607551,0.0,0.017715942001040742,0.05965137665049531,0.0,0.0,0.05805993432796544,0.02831154969379722,0.1996602754964198,0.21750061024308173,0.2054524466130845,0.027315055823260718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02659798354479057,0.028187798621548812,0.0,0.030561093903067688,0.02628207600588381,0.0,0.027807504947796824,0.026151209250194374,0.0,0.10049161125676864,0.13440262167654846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316345970046997,0.026174839291538715,0.10583703862476193,0.1041674506281294,0.023800637940005063,0.08182210162157044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029387102322692364,0.0,0.0,0.04430368026253964,0.08050812741050166,0.18100052112034848,0.0,0.0925247640189414,0.0,0.04175747880939637,0.04371533382342195,0.02994801748153464,0.02733152564557611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02717376592315845,0.019657135298018096,0.16810931847179286,0.0,0.024070006266273376,0.0,0.03035535495359768,0.017369001110935988,0.05025631677087323,0.07705943755592815,0.20755522287135544,0.12195883953590987,0.0,0.09912632936167706,0.02498184068313369,0.0,0.0,0.028437310615318238,0.0,0.0,0.031448174491873815,0.09032055135802773,0.02879407028972345,0.2157164881307366,0.0,0.06225599063740496,0.0,0.06367302455516831,0.09402686599429458,0.07270762320262633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057099723384547635,0.05310127484784133,0.026643106383287256,0.09286021438964108,0.08575351996808155,0.0,0.13468772243788835
mentalhealth,durrastic,2020/02/20,"I feel guilty for not being depressed anymore I have been very fortunate to be in a good place with my depression and anxiety. 

However, I hear about people who are depressed and are working so hard to get out of it and are stuck. I feel as though I should not be happy when so many people are struggling.  Is this a weird feeling to have? I would not wish depression on my worst enemy but I do not understand why I would be allowed to feel okay when there are people are working so hard to be happy.",4.223157142857144,5.235900830000006,5.085428571428572,84.04700000000003,70.7,8.514285714285714,28.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.100571428571429,393,14,79,7,7,128,60,100,0.262,0.635,0.10300000000000001,-0.9261,2,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,8,11,0,1,2,1,19,0,0,1,0,20,28,11,0,4,5,0,6,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,7,10,4,13,18,1,6,0,4,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,63,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524767185123055,0.0,0.14940540058008048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5190222538457109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046948715801455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787089768705512,0.0,0.0,0.12635898708472326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32074177427923184,0.26990757232350354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697947279354322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15273656010213324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.313327492149636,0.0,0.15739832507990534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749322960668274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14801393147894054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683309816423882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12430292708749828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593917686140236,0.0,0.17324131917022018,0.0,0.0,0.2193515762004603,0.0,0.0,0.21403642454274355,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kieginkieginkie,2020/02/20,"I drink wine to cover the taste TW eating disorder/depression
A stream of consciousness sort of thing I wrote one night
-
-

Is there a special name for someone who makes themself puke and then drinks wine to cover the taste? 

You know how you can take a couple shots sitting down and not feel the effects so much until you stand up? That’s how bloating works sometimes too

Washes over you
Like a wave
Knocks you from your feet
Gets you to your knees
Leaves you begging Please
Go away, don’t let my belly swell
Compress my outer shell

Stop

Where is this coming from
The root of the feeling
Won’t eat enough during the day and binge after everyone’s in bed
Why this time
Panic on Monday?
But why even did that happen
Feel out of control? 
Just hate my job?

Feel out of control because I hate my job and can’t leave it 

Feel out of control because (husbands) family is moving here? 
But I want them to move here, I’m excited for it

Feel out of control because 
Why

Do I even feel out of control? 
Is it something else?
Could it be just the having my weight measured last month
Has it been silently eating at me
Chipping away my resolve
My confidence that I’ve evolved 

What do I do now

Money’s the issue 
Counseling but can’t

Exercise is the affordablesooution
Can I do it

Why 
 
Can I force myself to get over it

I have to 
A) Get over
B) Face it with counseling 
C) Face it with exercise and eating at meal times
D) pretend nothings wrong",3.0533568904593658,5.084105826855126,3.62692014134276,89.22152508833923,75.53710247349824,6.224113074204947,24.747561837455827,7.087006719466742,0.9914849187279158,1131,38,224,12,25,355,163,283,0.067,0.885,0.048,-0.7998,3,0,5,0,0,0,19.0,0,9,1,8,13,8,2,1,14,0,24,19,4,10,0,45,45,13,0,2,6,1,8,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,17,13,12,6,11,7,1,4,5,4,0,1,3,10,28,4,38,38,2,36,0,0,0,0,14,18,0,1,13,147,45,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314247588422404,0.0,0.0,0.1587759255072946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478865011633283,0.0,0.0,0.4868859714422907,0.06931954670015451,0.09606584457581492,0.0,0.05599239712135677,0.0,0.07477884634692951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17010315904599746,0.0,0.3553584514121681,0.07252784974686564,0.0,0.0,0.08970935722097326,0.0,0.11468897430337995,0.0,0.0,0.08296123746179249,0.0,0.0,0.08184716256915417,0.0,0.30729533408318194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608125148198286,0.0,0.04934240561974408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677557107164001,0.0,0.0,0.17143563185594288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061862326338127,0.17231299821294035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04771458055654401,0.07077074663161262,0.0,0.18386191983307493,0.0,0.08878040973271896,0.0,0.04241638134565662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05795372753310399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929973675630959,0.18455408005643972,0.0638234642409947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147567749459808,0.0,0.08330714261891267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058832192945652936,0.0,0.0,0.1018657998966914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530344510893793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356319707004934,0.06683908884480425,0.08586824213541283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725862884974477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527862738226776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576800502379053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125210923843432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05120930693864311,0.0,0.0,0.10572465370012206,0.0,0.0,0.31336998731676674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320676114025384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492519284297156,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crazyfox567,2020/02/20,"Sociopath or psychopath? Hello! I live in the US and I’m seeking advice for a family situation that’s come to light. I have PTSD from an incident with my older cousin who lives in Spain and a month ago (after some incriminating sexual comments at a family reunion) we decided to tell my extended family too. We’ve had trouble convincing some family members of him and it occurred to me that some of his traits fit the profile of a psychopath. However looking online, I can’t quite figure out if he is a psychopath or sociopath.

He is a very sexually promiscuous guy age 20. Most of his conversations are about sex and if not they lead to the topic. He is obsessed with his looks (to what degree I don’t know). He lies constantly and when he can’t get away with flat out lying then he is augmenting the story to paint himself in a better light. He carries himself intelligently but he did poorly in high school and doesn’t go to college (Everyone goes to college in my family). He works as a waiter right now. He is irresponsible and has had minor run ins in the law like vandalism or weed but I don’t think has ever been actually charged with anything. He is very charming which is what makes me think he has some of my family members fooled but there are little things that give away that it’s an act. Like he calls his girlfriend a throwaway fuckbuddy or he tells everyone his dad is a fuck up slob. 

I’m not asking for any official diagnosis but does this sound like the traits of a psychopath or a sociopath? Does this even sound like it could be either?",4.747155715571555,6.133106663366338,5.943079807980797,76.98439468946897,69.82508250825083,9.205460546054605,29.614311431143108,9.573946990214177,2.7776019801980203,1241,48,231,28,22,415,167,303,0.07400000000000001,0.838,0.08800000000000001,0.7377,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,2,0,1,4,7,11,1,1,20,0,25,2,0,2,1,44,39,21,0,3,14,2,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,1,14,15,0,0,5,0,1,5,7,4,0,0,4,6,22,7,37,33,6,32,0,0,2,2,38,17,1,12,14,151,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.10613237567268267,0.0,0.0,0.10627731543488653,0.09640763764512483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395934800806794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949878326725694,0.0,0.101674294190196,0.0,0.20436393552194254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618784507164377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110543459577647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368561306495003,0.0,0.1175290447269258,0.0,0.08683462289915242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19035017691841796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183380668516677,0.09837807499697453,0.0,0.2078463611830205,0.0,0.0,0.6151656641207335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054526121247466,0.0568217033462721,0.10433083559022764,0.061809826937572074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10768777886592733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149090756182332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05977069681861456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21253517394328408,0.10900435088749436,0.19207107673605614,0.0,0.1826590981332845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259698476831057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680980754640827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12713258886911658,0.0,0.0,0.11567779953221224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287896196553133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006916801868827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224884388940302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901190303517624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225415701112063,0.13937580634106322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13082279878595274,0.0,0.0,0.17947391336709811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917731043498742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,musiclover255,2020/02/20,"I'm attached to my teacher (repost) Sorry for the the repost, I posted on the wrong account. 

This is my first reddit post so sorry for mistakes.

So imma give you a backstory so you could better understand what I'm going through. This briefly mentions a few sensitive topics (alcohol, mental health and attachment issues) but I'm not gonna make it graphic or anything. Skip a few paragraphs down if you don't wanna read the backstory and also I'm not in any danger as I now live at my dad's. 

So I was a happy kid, all my worries were as a kid was convincing my mom to buy me the next DS game to begging for a hamster. So pretty much what every average kid worries about. I always had loads of friends and I was always good and doing well in school despite of few issues at home.

However, this all changed as I got older (about 8 or 9 years old) my parents spilt up. To be honest I don't remember it being that impactful on me because as a kid I didn't really know what they meant. At first I handled it okay, but I started to be a little more sad than usual. Nothing serious but just the equivalent of me not getting a chocolate bar from the shop kinda sad. So I got referred to my primary school counsellor (obviously they couldn't really do much because I was only 9 turning 10 at this point and I was still in primary school.) and being honest I think it kinda helped.

Ever since I was young I've always had attachment issues, but as a kid it was pretty normal as most children were attached to their parents. But as I got older it didn't really seem to go away. Looking back though I can definitely see why.

My mom was and still is an alcoholic who refuses to admit she's wrong. As a child I was always sent up to my room when we had guests over and I was always 'protected' by her in a sense that meant I knew barely anything about the outside world. Growing up I was only taught the minimum basic needs (washing, bathing and manners) but I was never taught how to cook food or anything that was considered 'dangerous' in her books and whenever I would try to explore new things she would tell me they're dangerous and that I don't need them In my life. And still til this day I still don't know a few things. (yes I now  know how to take care of my needs if you were wondering) my mom's always believed that she knows what's best for me, even though it was clearly not. My mom's always been manipulative and has always made out to me that I'm a liar, b**ch you name it, she's said it. She would also use me as a way to get to my dad. She would constantly withhold me from seeing my dad and she would fill my head up with so many lies about him because of her jealously, she even gave me graphic details about his supposed 'affair' when I was 11 and as a child it didn't make me think highly of my dad. 

Every child no matter what age or gender needs their parents. Sure they will be able to grow to live without them but it takes a long time to do that. As I said before, as I got older my attachment never seemed to go away. I was attached to my mom despite her being an abusive alcoholic and I still love her. But my mom's emotionally abused me since she split up from my dad, through name calling, screaming and raging at me, punishing me with extreme punishments even though I did absolutely nothing, isolating me from the outside world and she's also physically abused me in the past. Which still scares me to this day. 

When you have an extreme attachment to someone your whole life revolves around them whether you like it or not. Every good interaction with that person makes you feel like you're on top of the world but every negative interaction makes you feel so low its unexplainable. The emotional pain truly turns into physical pain. As a kid my mom neglected me emotionally and I only saw my dad for 2 days a week and sometimes even less than that so I'm still getting there with my dad relationship and trust wise. 


 So I've always had that empty hole that's never been fulfilled. This is where I started to get extremely attached to the point where it was unhealthy. Specifically to one of my teachers. This teacher is honestly the nicest, positive teacher I've ever come across. She's always been welcoming and made me feel really happy with myself. She made me see that I am worth it and for a little while, I guess I could say I believed it. But once I'm attached I can't let go. I constantly re-think the whole conversation we had on the day and I always find something that I said wrong or something that I should've said. It's so hard because I think she's starting to catch onto it and I genuinely think she's weirded out by it. And I can't help but cry over it. Because my attachment is so extreme I can't even handle the fact that'll I'll be leaving school in a few years and that I'll never see her again. The pain is so painful it feels like a storm inside me. Getting stronger and more intense the more I think about it. Being honest I genuinely don't wanna be attached to her because if I had a student attached to me I would be slightly uncomfortable, so I see my side and hers. I have told her pretty much everything (apart from some of the extreme things that i haven't told anyone) and I cannot thank her enough for being there for me and listening. All she's ever been is nice to me, but my sensitive self always thinks that she hates me because of one of her actions, tone of voice or even the time when she told me that it's her work time. I get it. I honestly do. I understand it so much, I get that seeing me all the time is exhausting but I feel like I have no one left in a sense. I only wanna talk to her about my problems but then again she has her own problems like I have mine. Obviously. I just wish I could tell her how i truly feel, without her being weirded out or pushing me away. (pushing me away and neglecting me is honestly the worst pain for me so my mind constantly thinks about the past and makes up things that 'are gonna happen In the future' When they're obviously not going to.) 

I also get loads of nightmares about my mom and this teacher. The ones about my teacher mainly are about her neglecting me and telling me she doesn't wanna talk to me. Which hasn't happened but I still think now that it's going to. Even though she's the nicest person. 

Does anyone have any advice? It would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.",3.955425456130208,5.133968093530786,4.99328438890705,83.83485974572366,71.4941543257989,7.918903108473923,27.591490039306397,8.327250198279284,1.8106042273233929,5036,177,1009,77,93,1653,417,1283,0.121,0.7340000000000001,0.145,0.9854,4,0,5,0,2,0,107.0,2,10,8,6,77,64,9,1,55,2,97,18,1,13,17,184,202,110,0,27,37,18,7,5,2,11,13,8,3,13,70,48,6,6,31,7,4,16,31,33,1,6,56,23,194,31,142,117,26,135,0,6,8,1,126,55,0,19,66,729,264,10,0.03346610764921435,0.11895559543769645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032702693072637685,0.0,0.10729527415131876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705133678442018,0.3341577897376073,0.0,0.0,0.045516201606392734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04680056118818229,0.0,0.08261926529439394,0.029791931034647882,0.0,0.0,0.12577003909333914,0.02573337104270264,0.0,0.14280440021246085,0.0,0.028477192714183475,0.07540968630491172,0.03512061528308619,0.029598052621338782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03417263764499585,0.0,0.03412092714752953,0.0,0.035402704445352234,0.028828088448113413,0.0,0.10849491994873893,0.0,0.08015989138780179,0.0,0.03676094780531068,0.08633148340693769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029286416327947176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293460007126735,0.0,0.03457943525611033,0.0,0.15472833933149446,0.09081603101860736,0.11278655630340205,0.0,0.03007717964803557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152881742880436,0.07172458197432967,0.0,0.0,0.030587416101722432,0.056932508140505426,0.04046735020942529,0.0,0.025855831753513626,0.0,0.1398772798724743,0.032103739921897315,0.11411736122281164,0.05613956661487608,0.10706361389676802,0.03689650182899748,0.03686669057794741,0.0,0.05918793694136493,0.07125058778466356,0.02997905904024681,0.033040852793932374,0.03434588142038447,0.03557290748536901,0.0,0.0,0.04486325304399051,0.035358780148205086,0.033569234631792365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478976485414004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735683901987309,0.0,0.0,0.035435775876039584,0.03636102388138082,0.034221362469485726,0.04727620308604874,0.08174924879506935,0.06708366345290037,0.05910237236354213,0.02961645215256275,0.02810310177075085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03020446875749427,0.09499932070295232,0.11169443362217676,0.03392938044300529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033725965197884414,0.0,0.0337912286108127,0.3135608064483635,0.0,0.0,0.09840575912748496,0.09925877909752864,0.1032445013566728,0.032321775308127576,0.035591585149653014,0.0,0.03278967996878026,0.06422326575067143,0.0,0.03511705037259905,0.03564031243081501,0.09071000261112452,0.10180993163117773,0.17805149037396448,0.0,0.1114804562928845,0.0,0.0638943730403742,0.0,0.05844262870269298,0.0,0.0,0.06327257786090518,0.0,0.06410256048270242,0.1021411882863834,0.0,0.06404509064747348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03347516405322732,0.0,0.0857569820349951,0.0,0.0,0.03593007527409677,0.03791057613876527,0.0,0.1273357281437681,0.026613592033860718,0.033505411966546286,0.13547795044488534,0.1600089295491605,0.060932575009487476,0.03491244896500722,0.0,0.0,0.055367020153288496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028355724409555173,0.05152768934890914,0.03309883619122981,0.07492513520541405,0.07106244972967404,0.0,0.21380861438876933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03154141040426887,0.0,0.05032469608744768,0.053797579309622895,0.0877525594914527,0.061622191220065424,0.0,0.0,0.08893357948637852,0.1929935743147445,0.13152112339457486,0.0,0.07805742599026208,0.0,0.0,0.09593490005208148,0.0,0.0227212903208157,0.07280303017523254,0.0,0.0696787966170168,0.0,0.028903971946014774,0.03685818951953385,0.0,0.0,0.02656383853285644,0.02684449291170493,0.0,0.030090049894599395,0.0,0.030197956833355986,0.07472742809348634,0.03848437219382165,0.06452026706601241,0.03629256617699818,0.024363724948046457,0.06797291360260098,0.0,0.1664135387912582,0.1097698053504695,0.0,0.04310215219330963
mentalhealth,_Theconfusedfish_,2020/02/20,"I think I have a mental illness but I don’t know what it is The above pretty much explains what I’m talking about.


For a bit of background on me I am a thirteen year old female, in Australia, who has fairly good grades so far and horrible friendships.


My father is adopted so I don’t know much about his family history. But I do know that he suffers from a hereditary mental illness that makes him easily lose his temper. I do t know what the illness is as my family refuses to tell me but I have been told several times that I show symptoms of the mental illness.


I’ve done my share of research on hereditary mental illness to attempt to determine what is wrong with me but I’m at a loss and my mom avoids taking me to a therapist and likes to say I’m faking everything for attention if I try to explain to her why I suddenly lost my temper.


I’ll explain it best I can but I’m not great at words or explanations really.
It’s like I can be fine one second and content and then suddenly I’ll think about how I dropped something this morning and then my temper just explodes. Surprisingly I’m pretty good at hiding my emotions so no one has any clue that I’m mad.



Then there are times like this. This happens more often so than the sudden anger. I’ll be talking with my friends or just doing anything then something just comes over me and I feel giddy. Then I’ll do things like insult my friends or in general just say or do things that go too far, and internally I’m completely aware of what I’m doing but it’s like I’m just watching myself with no control over what I’m saying and doing even though inside I feel completely guilty and just want myself to shut up. It’s a terrifying feeling and it happens constantly.


I don’t know what’s wrong with me Reddit. I suspect BIPOLAR or Autism but I’m not an expert so I’m hoping someone with more knowledge can tell me something.",2.861309949892629,4.754672530183728,4.367320448580293,84.31478883321404,75.66666666666667,7.137866857551898,27.031018849916485,8.00094639256281,1.7852162729658791,1498,59,291,24,33,499,174,381,0.225,0.621,0.154,-0.9873,0,1,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,6,20,29,6,1,12,0,27,7,0,3,0,64,62,37,0,3,21,2,3,5,2,0,7,3,0,0,24,17,0,3,16,1,0,2,7,14,0,3,4,7,40,15,35,56,6,29,0,4,1,0,24,13,0,8,18,196,64,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648206396689979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843996110333139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003210583805357,0.0,0.10406438470625716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210944972080925,0.19988170679639225,0.10300669305595478,0.10690910754432108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975451097977078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072217914943331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295773860369494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085667167092924,0.0,0.17971779058210913,0.0,0.14458945734276035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14728747077184476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05417236127455341,0.1598992222675053,0.0,0.10509026525482568,0.0,0.0,0.16858172684992842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467393320442533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619259705224614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328418634393343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663832136509233,0.10405267241967674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06362661539700233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842392045779473,0.0,0.0,0.11163723757572457,0.0,0.0,0.14014184023785092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000219521007036,0.0,0.12918214143782453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939487311508592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06106421708539943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274060662323336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10768408782311732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08076404135827682,0.22014520103052213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907362737690076,0.07166852409490419,0.1532286693713751,0.16662717415121786,0.0,0.0,0.110673475810111,0.12665229757553126,0.12215398275853592,0.09365108519099463,0.0,0.11116332437752477,0.0,0.0,0.09108202308170207,0.0,0.06471579440817965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05622200703951121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601117006916492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20843417649213428,0.0,0.061382737963099884
mentalhealth,iamavoice7,2020/02/20,"Mental health and relationships I have a friend who been going through some shit with her current GF. 
She cause her anxiety and has even had panic Attacks because of the Gf. 
The GF even asked my Friend "" would you kill yourself for me""
I'm trying to understand my friends reason behind forgiving this person time and time again after being hurt multiple times. 
I can't seem to understand. Am I wrong for not understanding? 
I'm worried. And I'm worried thing may escalate. 
She believes this girl cant change. I dont. 
Any thoughts?",2.8671212121212117,5.7952511919191965,3.480025252525256,84.80670454545456,82.53535353535355,6.5323232323232325,26.431818181818183,7.793537801064563,1.9489454545454552,424,18,75,8,12,133,72,99,0.20199999999999999,0.657,0.142,-0.8353,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,3,10,3,1,3,0,11,2,1,2,0,17,21,4,1,1,1,0,0,0,6,2,1,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,7,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,3,0,12,4,9,15,1,7,0,1,0,0,17,0,1,3,6,48,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09944367093892692,0.0,0.11186808817467887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13670841248214555,0.16636151039443434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914247349399873,0.0,0.0,0.16475487333855454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502218996260494,0.15469546082321728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713843598565996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19317145504070604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.338938496711581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310776468853444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543917908207378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654579161634005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16178550033397582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14736879031509845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17157329119429898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768529298148268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15035220624762202,0.0,0.15699985746905232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312532076169384,0.0,0.0,0.15010639971629788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715091881285423,0.0,0.0,0.11609292024089403,0.2558094714814159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928282405945217,0.0,0.0,0.4567021243637679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2970140659587815,0.0,0.10387995361957926,0.15988317737493304,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,johnsmith23571,2020/02/20,"My story My story

I am young mid teens and I started DRDP after trying weed. Something that I was peer pressured to do by my own cousins. I hated it and remember vividly going into the high feelings horrible. Horrible as a person because I am this straight A student who is religious and never likes going against their parents. (Keep in mind my parents are great, they dont force me to be perfect but I have high standard for myself). At first it was so hard. It started 2019 summer after experiencing 2 traumas. And since my parents dont really know much about mental health they said it would leave. But they did not and they decided to take me to city for a vacation to clear my head. (Horrible moment of my life: DR like crazy). And as I kept going I struggled and struggled. Went through another trauma a few months later and the feelings while were consistently lessening it surely didnt help. 

My experience is a bit weird. I liked to think a lot before DR and after the high which I regret to this day and weighs a burden I noticed the patterns yet I struggle to see the process. For me I wake up very good. Very normal ready to start my day no DRDP symptoms. However as the day goes on it becomes to worsen and worsen. By the end of the day I feel so tired and frustrated. And the cycle repeats. My thoughts are strange I sometimes just forget i am a human with limbs and can do stuff. I forget the people around me and question if they are real. When I 100% know they are and that I am fine. My mind most of the time is blank when no one is talking to me. And its so annoying That i never feel like agile and have fast reaction time. I dont know what to do. I am hopeful and look forward to getting physically healthier. But I dont know what to keep doing. I read stories of people who have been like this for their lives and unlike most I want to fight. I want to return to my life. So I turn to reddit. What can I do? Meditation? Any methods that have worked for you?


Forgot to add: the dreams I have are crazy. I dream almost every night. They are insignificant dreams like idk buying a cat or something but I dream almost every night.",2.0297823303457108,4.386587464788736,3.4760499359795136,87.38541933418695,80.45539906103286,5.844558258642768,23.531583440034147,7.075746649084167,0.9762413145539908,1684,59,328,21,44,552,213,426,0.19,0.684,0.126,-0.9833,4,0,3,0,1,0,44.0,0,1,9,3,10,25,4,4,21,0,39,10,2,0,5,71,70,36,0,7,8,4,5,6,0,1,7,1,0,2,21,24,1,4,13,5,1,5,10,13,0,2,11,10,59,12,46,57,7,46,0,1,3,0,23,12,0,9,37,234,80,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805241925791064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05366778309245508,0.08275369442286909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025484712012099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04810843049769331,0.0871600898753012,0.06715445260055228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615935995979272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035854997567584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3699710022117775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989901388034965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298571114918806,0.0,0.0,0.07719815098118295,0.0,0.0,0.15961573708110888,0.056379914139623725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712865726838117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041232040739446515,0.0,0.13455485240510548,0.06619370636517358,0.0,0.08700873039242789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069612933878472,0.07791640156042598,0.08099389883752912,0.08388745174310068,0.0,0.0,0.05289789675350779,0.2501475004198712,0.0,0.07838460307812678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14029407662886972,0.0,0.0,0.17348778097916054,0.0,0.0,0.08356407021279401,0.0,0.0,0.11148597304308316,0.2313356983648864,0.0,0.06968712652442861,0.0,0.06627227742334355,0.0,0.0,0.06709430771363721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953202248623206,0.0,0.15937185120982966,0.0,0.0629925769652565,0.0,0.05801471508510609,0.0,0.12173475177507745,0.0,0.0,0.14812070364488344,0.07732408989015296,0.0,0.08985006715932832,0.0,0.0,0.05347771312892383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628913985007988,0.0,0.0,0.1094253153389764,0.0689092281401728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884075998337215,0.0,0.07894058730685602,0.0898273620892606,0.05055767999181286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940010393307962,0.0,0.0750702606627413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288840911462895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528280311608736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151175878631612,0.07805313706467708,0.0,0.16757831293088388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475105452079397,0.09034363782485916,0.0,0.0,0.07438044090957978,0.08202729827100501,0.05933743982352729,0.06343228818290685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050568256376680346,0.0,0.0626530537663317,0.09203687607826183,0.09070604613543502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05358097721172637,0.0858414607111917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302332607406001,0.09309721391910533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07315891746329414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745413983105081,0.0,0.0,0.05606195714490215,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Amy_Marsh,2020/02/20,"I'm attached to my teacher This is my first reddit post so sorry for mistakes.

So imma give you a backstory so you could better understand what I'm going through. This briefly mentions a few sensitive topics (alcohol, mental health and attachment issues) but I'm not gonna make it graphic or anything. Skip a few paragraphs down if you don't wanna read the backstory and also I'm not in any danger as I now live at my dad's. 

So I was a happy kid, all my worries were as a kid was convincing my mom to buy me the next DS game to begging for a hamster. So pretty much what every average kid worries about. I always had loads of friends and I was always good and doing well in school despite of few issues at home.

However, this all changed as I got older (about 8 or 9 years old) my parents spilt up. To be honest I don't remember it being that impactful on me because as a kid I didn't really know what they meant. At first I handled it okay, but I started to be a little more sad than usual. Nothing serious but just the equivalent of me not getting a chocolate bar from the shop kinda sad. So I got referred to my primary school counsellor (obviously they couldn't really do much because I was only 9 turning 10 at this point and I was still in primary school.) and being honest I think it kinda helped.

Ever since I was young I've always had attachment issues, but as a kid it was pretty normal as most children were attached to their parents. But as I got older it didn't really seem to go away. Looking back though I can definitely see why.

My mom was and still is an alcoholic who refuses to admit she's wrong. As a child I was always sent up to my room when we had guests over and I was always 'protected' by her in a sense that meant I knew barely anything about the outside world. Growing up I was only taught the minimum basic needs (washing, bathing and manners) but I was never taught how to cook food or anything that was considered 'dangerous' in her books and whenever I would try to explore new things she would tell me they're dangerous and that I don't need them In my life. And still til this day I still don't know a few things. (yes I now  know how to take care of my needs if you were wondering) my mom's always believed that she knows what's best for me, even though it was clearly not. My mom's always been manipulative and has always made out to me that I'm a liar, b**ch you name it, she's said it. She would also use me as a way to get to my dad. She would constantly withhold me from seeing my dad and she would fill my head up with so many lies about him because of her jealously, she even gave me graphic details about his supposed 'affair' when I was 11 and as a child it didn't make me think highly of my dad. 

Every child no matter what age or gender needs their parents. Sure they will be able to grow to live without them but it takes a long time to do that. As I said before, as I got older my attachment never seemed to go away. I was attached to my mom despite her being an abusive alcoholic and I still love her. But my mom's emotionally abused me since she split up from my dad, through name calling, screaming and raging at me, punishing me with extreme punishments even though I did absolutely nothing, isolating me from the outside world and she's also physically abused me in the past. Which still scares me to this day. 

When you have an extreme attachment to someone your whole life revolves around them whether you like it or not. Every good interaction with that person makes you feel like you're on top of the world but every negative interaction makes you feel so low its unexplainable. The emotional pain truly turns into physical pain. As a kid my mom neglected me emotionally and I only saw my dad for 2 days a week and sometimes even less than that so I'm still getting there with my dad relationship and trust wise. 


 So I've always had that empty hole that's never been fulfilled. This is where I started to get extremely attached to the point where it was unhealthy. Specifically to one of my teachers. This teacher is honestly the nicest, positive teacher I've ever come across. She's always been welcoming and made me feel really happy with myself. She made me see that I am worth it and for a little while, I guess I could say I believed it. But once I'm attached I can't let go. I constantly re-think the whole conversation we had on the day and I always find something that I said wrong or something that I should've said. It's so hard because I think she's starting to catch onto it and I genuinely think she's weirded out by it. And I can't help but cry over it. Because my attachment is so extreme I can't even handle the fact that'll I'll be leaving school in a few years and that I'll never see her again. The pain is so painful it feels like a storm inside me. Getting stronger and more intense the more I think about it. Being honest I genuinely don't wanna be attached to her because if I had a student attached to me I would be slightly uncomfortable, so I see my side and hers. I have told her pretty much everything (apart from some of the extreme things that i haven't told anyone) and I cannot thank her enough for being there for me and listening. All she's ever been is nice to me, but my sensitive self always thinks that she hates me because of one of her actions, tone of voice or even the time when she told me that it's her work time. I get it. I honestly do. I understand it so much, I get that seeing me all the time is exhausting but I feel like I have no one left in a sense. I only wanna talk to her about my problems but then again she has her own problems like I have mine. Obviously. I just wish I could tell her how i truly feel, without her being weirded out or pushing me away. (pushing me away and neglecting me is honestly the worst pain for me so my mind constantly thinks about the past and makes up things that 'are gonna happen In the future' When they're obviously not going to.) 

I also get loads of nightmares about my mom and this teacher. The ones about my teacher mainly are about her neglecting me and telling me she doesn't wanna talk to me. Which hasn't happened but I still think now that it's going to. Even though she's the nicest person. 

Does anyone have any advice? It would be greatly appreciated. Thanks.",3.9544458317654687,5.123592007867824,4.9866051209249855,83.91751107481275,71.48623131392606,7.949375705538262,27.662581671398765,8.355424660458986,1.8252505319330896,4986,176,1002,77,92,1636,414,1271,0.12,0.7340000000000001,0.146,0.9868,4,0,5,0,2,0,103.0,2,10,8,6,77,63,9,1,52,2,97,18,1,13,17,184,202,110,0,27,37,18,7,5,2,11,13,8,3,13,70,48,6,6,31,7,3,16,31,32,1,6,56,23,193,31,140,117,26,133,0,6,8,1,126,54,0,19,66,723,263,10,0.03370262511522698,0.1197962990025046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03293381520307495,0.0,0.10805356987615776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780790851289576,0.3365194074825074,0.0,0.0,0.0458378815812289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047131318211264366,0.0,0.08320316646019665,0.030002481724013857,0.0,0.0,0.12665890287333018,0.025915238374714458,0.0,0.1438136521764997,0.0,0.02867845165742572,0.07594263468673719,0.035368825771698385,0.029807233099638963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03441414842203275,0.0,0.034362072467192216,0.0,0.035652908563296774,0.02903182730239562,0.0,0.1092616940179104,0.0,0.08072641124083095,0.0,0.03702075113572096,0.0869416202028432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029493394356317912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373275101591818,0.0,0.03482382102360532,0.0,0.1558218622210584,0.09145786178527407,0.11358366096752327,0.0,0.03028974629575348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022463594530285,0.07223148634926321,0.0,0.0,0.0308035887807828,0.0573348714120361,0.04075334806815757,0.0,0.02603856456104804,0.0,0.14086584478521982,0.03233062902700165,0.11492387118170436,0.05653632587286854,0.10782027239217608,0.03715726317025641,0.03712724123197522,0.0,0.059606240169533024,0.07175414226585328,0.030190932233029332,0.03327436482525761,0.034588616575804025,0.035824314491685105,0.0,0.0,0.04518031838777863,0.035608673836757414,0.03380648093465846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553035321019116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408832545414866,0.0,0.0,0.03568621372212083,0.03661800080024431,0.03446321760303224,0.0476103216478431,0.08232700122974486,0.06755776872552524,0.059520070874922136,0.029825762667213325,0.028301716873755493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030417935004829075,0.09567071633823504,0.11248381984793504,0.0341691720306579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033964319174123445,0.0,0.034030043827934925,0.31577685762943913,0.0,0.0,0.09910122933375584,0.09996027791411438,0.10397416875918566,0.032550205350636185,0.03584312415798959,0.0,0.033021416868059705,0.06467715552577234,0.0,0.035365235666659084,0.03589219581302342,0.0913510840354857,0.10252946039432898,0.17930984667175795,0.0,0.11226833026104058,0.0,0.06434593840801055,0.0,0.05885566455952955,0.0,0.0,0.06371974877007124,0.0,0.032277798594325044,0.10286305816387964,0.0,0.06449772119265866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03371174552422525,0.0,0.08636305861540926,0.0,0.0,0.03618400651840364,0.0381785043214331,0.0,0.1282356572322991,0.02680168021594994,0.03374220721083049,0.136435423655564,0.1611397723395156,0.06136320824565372,0.03515918826460105,0.0,0.0,0.055758319537267904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028556124890979487,0.05189185474997801,0.03333275801285225,0.03772732954193802,0.07156467456905143,0.0,0.21531967961980736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03176432531691654,0.0,0.05068035948640702,0.054177786869740036,0.08837273956212574,0.06205769823122685,0.0,0.0,0.0895621062658902,0.19435753189332225,0.1324506322325454,0.0,0.07860908693608225,0.0,0.0,0.0966129077756067,0.0,0.02288187015482406,0.07331755634587586,0.0,0.07017124266372797,0.0,0.029108247097282092,0.037118680093410863,0.0,0.0,0.026751575088395402,0.027034212956426645,0.0,0.03030270750115052,0.0,0.03041137705849388,0.07525555470204122,0.0387563556072433,0.06497625586019386,0.03654905927972926,0.02453591248021308,0.06845330353773467,0.0,0.16758964534412252,0.07369705967354828,0.0,0.04340677118047445
mentalhealth,sansa_ofwinterfell,2020/02/20,"Bulimia question? In my nutrition class bulimia is defined as recurrent episodes of binging followed by some form of purging (vomiting, laxatives, excessive exercise, not eating.) 

I starve myself or eat very little (around 200 calories per day) most of the week and then binge eat like one or two days a week, so is this actually considered bulimia? thanks",5.3067142857142855,8.774636433333335,5.846190476190479,68.41500000000002,76.33333333333334,10.761904761904765,38.57142857142857,10.290406445055957,5.816642857142857,286,18,40,11,7,92,52,60,0.0,0.871,0.129,0.8001,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,2,5,0,0,0,8,4,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,7,4,3,9,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,5,6,26,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.21373695873173296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949788259956455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825062138733266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6723522467172293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700462845158404,0.21952074755277945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14841711497829432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453583023986823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016489378515631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21395575304768194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807186929136062,0.0,0.0,0.3513775395280965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sadcoffeecup,2020/02/20,"Wellbutrin and caffeine... I take 300mg of Wellbutrin daily to help with depression (just diagnosed last year.), and I drink a fair amount of caffeine daily(16-30oz), and I take a multivitamin daily. I still always find myself feeling tired all the time and unmotivated. I've also had blood work, it's not my thyroid. Is it just depression making me feel like this?",5.586268656716417,7.353532402985074,6.191223880597018,74.54146268656717,68.25373134328359,8.345074626865673,31.310447761194034,8.841846274778883,2.741002388059701,289,12,49,5,5,94,51,67,0.182,0.6890000000000001,0.129,-0.6908,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,3,0,2,5,1,1,1,13,7,5,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,7,1,4,6,2,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,29,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20017435470351175,0.20827957233447086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4311865856683525,0.2540613332209977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452103901822766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531304590002326,0.17882288808784055,0.0,0.0,0.2287805631998865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677788059025554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040376262540329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228976202700845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16708515256988293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19989942536407765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3764068293791272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14595889548659846,0.2876967335707201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18223006143194012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611926718673911
mentalhealth,loser_rat,2020/02/20,"How do i open a convo about my serious concerns with a new therapist? I have some pretty serious mental health issues (ive been on mood stabilizers and anti psychotics since i was 15, the only reason i havent been hospitalized is gross incompetency from my precious psychiatrist) and so far all my meetings with my new therapist have been ""get to know you"" ""how was life growing up"" type questions, and i dont know how to bring up my more serious issues to him. 

im still looking for a new psychiatrist thats in network (thanks a lot BC) and i can afford after my previous decided to cancel all my refills bc i didnt want to start a new medication (abilify) when seroquel, the one ive been on for almost 4 years has never had any issues and she changed the prescription w/o ever consulting me. Because of this (and past issues with the psych) im leaving that practice all together, while i never was 100% comfortable there bc of the management issues i really liked my therapist and we spent years building a bond and trust. Losing that has really taken a toll on my mental health, i need to talk about the important shit that is really hurting me but i have no idea how to talk to this person i have no real relationship with. 

any advice for opening up to a new therapist; any help would be appreciated?  

feel free to ask questions, ill do my bast to answer them",5.664647729814359,6.454462809885932,6.99942294788638,72.43501453813467,67.28897338403041,10.294699172444645,31.44016998434355,10.328600350310266,3.35734775218072,1081,42,194,27,17,369,144,263,0.10400000000000001,0.805,0.091,0.4936,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,1,1,1,1,11,14,1,0,14,0,26,6,1,5,6,42,39,16,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,1,5,0,0,1,6,15,0,0,9,0,2,2,7,7,0,1,11,2,31,7,31,26,6,28,0,2,1,0,15,10,1,5,17,136,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444067759830147,0.0,0.0,0.08652900392258353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762891008765491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078343210512584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05267587286280518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141229884456192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127406607230016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07816448203991952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04369243699288095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04514663466248868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18370355037943506,0.0,0.0,0.05792005382988277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250569221578388,0.0975484812091431,0.1866792922056072,0.4509576999258311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949794058917244,0.0,0.0,0.09149769162888652,0.0,0.0,0.06103525807483112,0.04221647401377771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256420597732828,0.09667277731513348,0.0,0.07346428030136926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705086631121069,0.17416567789329132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407330541523669,0.13329231989384044,0.4172856042981245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05855491830912728,0.06572011970144448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248990598823297,0.0,0.07545151032852387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791193567698688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936021375367945,0.0,0.0,0.09835562407802792,0.16607296658419254,0.08884579247708656,0.0,0.09277400780308273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870054102639903,0.0714807904039905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06116276513416132,0.0,0.06900862963808749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389091730140658,0.0,0.07955643851955611,0.0,0.4013233571092197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050967958770961184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061384511954645726,0.0,0.0,0.11129282010702077
mentalhealth,losermachine95,2020/02/20,"Anxiety & depression, does it ever go away? Hi all, I (24F) started going to therapy last year around August to finally talk to someone about all that I feel and why. Since I was a teenager I kinda had an inkling that something was wrong with me. Well long story short I was diagnosed with anxiety & depression. Now almost 8 months later I feel good, but I never actually feel “great.” I have just as many good days as I have bad ones. So I’m wondering for those of you who have been treated for years, does it ever really go away or is it just a matter of managing it? Sorry if this is a silly question, but this is all still new to me mainly because of the fact that my family doesn’t believe in either so after years of suppressing I’m learning more about it everyday. 
Also, do you guys take medication? Why or why not? 
Thank you <3",4.086297405189619,5.240481017964076,5.665044910179643,79.23413423153694,71.1556886227545,9.159481037924152,27.689121756487022,9.516144504307137,2.4894115768463068,658,23,127,15,12,224,108,167,0.139,0.804,0.057,-0.9333,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,3,0,0,13,11,0,0,5,0,13,2,0,0,7,30,25,11,0,1,9,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,12,4,0,1,6,0,0,3,3,4,1,1,5,3,15,7,21,20,6,27,0,2,0,0,8,5,0,7,19,91,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.1173754479409612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044255154864793,0.0,0.0,0.09618747799417653,0.0,0.2606455903571726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840269867010121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707426163467644,0.0,0.0,0.2260131116714444,0.0,0.10042836395556584,0.07332127084607043,0.0,0.0,0.13551381533158194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757033129938426,0.0,0.2071931256218564,0.12208116736312945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21051481359793228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175993997524636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338881424639408,0.0,0.18245079763691768,0.0,0.0,0.13176032029452606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20507284637607973,0.20176948707311732,0.0,0.1326085806807148,0.0,0.11909562187826128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804385139326488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644357838994513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194454110516376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12116894888126672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600595465659524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09276697050746203,0.11616669700982953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150450654885293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13474057468098255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705413187832859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949645081634577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191243564367956,0.09259704052682664,0.0,0.13464306024117434,0.08513445386612654,0.0,0.09605536936404784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043522001454307,0.09667611132040373,0.0,0.11073720964118987,0.1375500982914243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081457214461118,0.0,0.3256006393523435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043799415722038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315067587038292,0.0,0.23236817624863104
mentalhealth,saphomet,2020/02/20,"Frustrated and deeply depressed. ⚠️Trigger warning for suicidal ideation and self harm⚠️The last week has been hell for me. I have been very depressed for a while but I hit a low I haven't felt in a couple of years. I'm very suicidal and have been self harming daily which is something I haven't done in several years.
  I've reached out to a friend and my mom last week after almost attempting twice. My mom doesn't know I've attempted or that I have been self harming but my friend does cause she's been the one I've called. I came to the conclusion that I need to get help by getting back on meds and checking myself into a hospital because I don't feel safe. Every day has been a struggle for me and I haven't felt genuine happiness or a will to live. i really don't want to go to inpatient at this point but I know I need to be in a place where I can be safe. I have to spend a majority of the day sleeping or pacing around and getting rid of things I can use to kill myself so I don't but I'm getting so sick of that.  I don't have health insurance but my county has a program where you can be provided services like meds, therapy and hospitalization with little to no cost. I'm an adult but, I'm currently unemployed and unable to drive. So, I'm relying on my mom to get me there because I live in a rural area. It just seems like she doesn't care because I told her last week and I'm still sitting here losing it and it's frustrating and it only makes me feel shittier. I'm trying to hold on but it feels like I'm on the verge of breaking. I'm just upset at the moment because I wish I hadn't told anyone and that I'd already be dead because it seems like no one cares. I just needed to yell about this",2.1438919413919417,3.6162839203296713,3.8271648351648366,89.23450183150185,76.55494505494505,7.161025641025642,24.770695970695968,7.908726449838941,1.2230339926739928,1353,46,299,21,30,453,165,364,0.228,0.685,0.08800000000000001,-0.9953,3,1,1,0,0,2,19.0,0,1,0,4,14,23,4,2,17,0,34,3,1,3,0,53,71,27,4,5,13,3,5,4,2,1,2,1,0,4,14,18,0,3,10,0,3,3,12,12,0,3,13,6,37,11,40,52,1,42,1,4,0,0,17,21,1,6,20,183,51,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646825612284867,0.0,0.09529069946478376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037876871019573,0.0,0.0,0.07687087794260572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06639874475322878,0.0,0.26319445848878426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817423262460965,0.09876277169354382,0.17608161236650674,0.08870647173122546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554596338814997,0.0,0.1113787642006274,0.0,0.14874832874931204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07556651941439255,0.08836726088403653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275461259193368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309852879820042,0.06168931647992094,0.16582139258416267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13342945004252132,0.0,0.2255746970445533,0.0,0.04907537847238375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09192246099395084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178729053149227,0.0,0.0,0.057879390980766464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553481181920408,0.0,0.09491272547629734,0.21116326608505445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16874734353317514,0.08654659040451983,0.15249938806559735,0.0,0.0,0.09660490806609638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05764009834645019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19183343948269646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034004549593229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920849680035277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702761950515532,0.06567398080593903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021862793011076,0.0,0.08162979774965007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531879161400805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722178367141018,0.27024941081650583,0.097552280185639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641356453004982,0.0,0.0,0.06647737459511939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896018203990431,0.0,0.0,0.09027302594346873,0.0,0.18890840082577925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875012589700824,0.0,0.05736790211538927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650245494048486,0.0,0.05862679840788562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07457971411569707,0.0,0.1424975713539205,0.05093217664922217,0.0,0.2077971786031832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929962157097344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121468683792826
mentalhealth,JediBee,2020/02/20,"I want to hurt myself \*Trigger Warning\*

This is purely a cry for help and validation. I am in a more calm state right this second. Reading through the posts and commenting on this thread helped. I have been having intrusive self harm thoughts more frequently as of the last few weeks. I want to stab my forearm and bash my head into something. 2 days ago I was literally thinking that suicide might be a better alternative than showing up to work the next day. At 30 years old I am finally recognizing and accepting I may have depression or some real MI. I made a doctors appointment to evaluate. I have had a hard time accepting it because it feels like every time I try to express to someone that I feel depressed, they brush me off with ""well everyone is depressed"" or give me an attitude that makes me feel like I am playing victim. That usually makes is so much worse and I feel like, ""Who am I to have the right to feel these feelings when others have it so much worse?"" I've had panic attacks that started in junior high. I believe I have a hard time expressing myself because when I was growing up, I was always the one who was ""put together"" when everyone else was falling apart. I felt pressure to keep up that facade when I was with my family. I have always prided myself on being a strong motivated person. It's weird because I can objectively tell myself that I am a badass, but then also have that voice that says, ""you're such a piece of shit hypocrite."" I also read something that was helpful on here just a few minutes ago, [https://www.dazeddigital.com](https://www.dazeddigital.com/artsandculture/article/31195/1/what-life-is-like-when-you-don-t-feel-real) I have often felt this feeling, but didn't know there was a word for it specifically. 

Anyway, I'm posting here for the anonymity and shit.",5.615892857142856,7.3721184702380995,5.911719047619048,76.61661428571429,68.16666666666667,8.471238095238096,30.701904761904764,8.954980946260402,2.6461263333333336,1450,58,253,26,25,463,188,336,0.138,0.7659999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.9333,0,0,2,0,0,3,65.0,0,0,1,5,16,23,4,2,18,0,35,5,4,5,1,43,56,20,1,2,5,0,11,3,0,2,1,2,0,2,23,9,0,1,15,4,0,3,1,12,1,2,16,14,36,11,30,36,8,42,0,4,0,0,14,15,2,6,24,179,59,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592076052717069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14362879918951893,0.14944444264309034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216241579672816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642268771301212,0.0,0.0,0.10117578179377842,0.0,0.07942231987092338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986429679244094,0.11582935502205648,0.0,0.2320382584144067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191586123569792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750178103565403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566181858710005,0.17161877542417042,0.0,0.0,0.08465706540678297,0.0,0.3632515655498934,0.19246309090168134,0.17244745970861286,0.09837339006785753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614598851316352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16088939681167996,0.0,0.09216246809602413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18057659126910605,0.09488044308535916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613459397199332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981989104701692,0.0,0.0,0.04935267442679662,0.07320038396465099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342960754579975,0.17549032890978125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497255470281266,0.11988668509287735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526542910219822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202918750352954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550514341713763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423179434464206,0.0,0.06085196663985081,0.0,0.0,0.10536296450450776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841139432897153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17201044029268026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902755276711852,0.0,0.0,0.17965203462408047,0.10221401255554184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338034906617115,0.0,0.07141392869555405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368277449365077,0.0,0.1843603413458711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608870228860261,0.13826749610980058,0.0,0.0,0.06356211657398668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822850155925356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849065768601393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575413133813469,0.0,0.07129253131079652,0.15709230775954774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060969470215717005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890390274436647,0.0,0.10593475719522516,0.0,0.07203351957246865,0.0,0.0807425271599784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06537671855735137,0.0,0.1830312405315561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05782936064101464
mentalhealth,Newastro,2020/02/20,"I’ve been depressed for ages and I don’t see it getting better. Life is just the same everyday: wake up and do nothing all day long. I have absolutely no willpower whatsoever to do anything. Life feels pointless. There is so much wrong and I can’t talk to anyone or be understood or anything. I have suffered in silence for years and I’m 18. I’ve been very close to suicide and have had frequent occasions where I cry myself to sleep. I think about different suicide methods every single day. My life is such a disaster compared to most other people my age. I have none of those teen experiences that you hear about like partying, getting drunk, etc. or just going out with mates in general. Certainly no mingling with the opposite sex. 

If I struggle with doing even the most simplest everyday things then I have no idea how I will get better by improving myself to the point where I am content. It’s impossible.",3.823591040462429,6.239744549132947,4.792192919075145,79.96320267341044,74.60693641618495,7.793208092485548,30.465679190751448,8.660442795831766,2.7401910404624283,729,34,128,15,16,237,114,173,0.20199999999999999,0.7140000000000001,0.084,-0.9741,2,0,1,0,0,2,17.0,0,1,0,2,11,8,0,1,5,0,19,7,2,1,2,27,29,12,2,1,6,0,1,1,1,1,3,1,0,0,6,10,1,0,4,1,0,1,6,4,0,0,4,3,16,4,19,23,8,19,0,2,1,1,4,8,0,6,11,95,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110212777862763,0.0,0.2615118547490677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810570250311347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745372028299696,0.2049465061375815,0.0,0.13685485958554092,0.0,0.0,0.16601003535554107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17720841060288167,0.10494775087515948,0.0,0.1338747450030165,0.0,0.0,0.15542846954010267,0.0,0.0,0.08034139876963932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24904610693497464,0.0,0.09030291750389054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17908468068790284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17937157933015704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.336693831621031,0.07762740663656881,0.0,0.0,0.1406158715991857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680510817779916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246273328007906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015684362845607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15020584907346238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661765931260702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15900839141496229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661101323790496,0.0,0.3476077060752949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277126893116796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556187427087264,0.10181262887831057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311038939589537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17372525215733944,0.0,0.1023222948387242
mentalhealth,dzsjb,2020/02/20,"Feeling dejected. What should I do? As the title says, I feel dejected. Not sad, just demotivated and less productive. Takes more time to study and more energy to focus. 
Have been taking the same antidepressant for about 4 months which (was) helpful until the last two weeks.",3.96125,7.20510929166667,4.492500000000003,77.1025,81.08333333333334,8.200000000000001,22.583333333333336,8.841846274778883,2.3203083333333336,218,7,36,6,6,69,41,48,0.11699999999999999,0.7140000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.2136,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,9,4,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,3,2,0,6,6,4,5,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,27,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3667059919714728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430584359278124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955860011098901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894420794002983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28837222516290795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5452944710702828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114482854725295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3542298090009244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908741572527697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ContapraDesabafar,2020/02/20,"How do I cope with borderline personality disorder? I took the decision to seek help today, so I have to wait a few days now so I can talk to a professional. With that being said, I'm pretty sure I've been suffering from BPD. I match pretty much *all* the criteria.

I'm having a hard time coping with my significant other being away. She's busy, and we don't really have anything much going on so far...just dating. But I feel really attached to her, nonetheless, and her absence makes me think of so many horrible things...during my dissociative moments, I've even had violent fantasies (which I know I could never act on; I have a hard time hurting people or even animals even in self-defense, let alone out of anger - something I've never been able to do). I feel bad after having these fantasies and I always go back to imagining the perfect world with her. This can be a difficult, time consuming task...as I have to imagine a perfect, but *believable* world. I can't just lay down in bed imagining some unrealistic dialogue. It needs to feel real, and this often leads me to feeling worse.

I was wondering if anybody on here knows any advice that has worked for people with BPD (or whatever what I just described might be. Does it sound like anything with a name to anyone here? Not looking for a diagnosis here, just looking for things that might help me in my conversation with a psychologist.) I need a way to cope with this, because it's making me feel miserable. This clouds my mind 24/7. I've even had a nightmare the other night. It's not like she doesn't give me good reasons to believe she likes me, but my mind requires proof like every 5 minutes.

Any advice is greatly appreciated.",4.251324786324783,6.106515006172843,5.476790123456791,77.99209401709403,71.77777777777777,8.564862298195633,28.510921177587853,9.162432508145574,2.5595260208926884,1338,52,244,29,26,445,178,324,0.10099999999999999,0.782,0.11699999999999999,0.8127,0,1,1,0,0,0,53.0,1,0,0,5,18,16,2,1,15,0,28,0,0,5,7,63,51,15,0,4,11,0,7,4,0,2,0,2,1,1,17,14,0,2,14,2,0,5,7,7,0,0,7,11,34,9,36,36,5,30,0,3,2,0,15,11,0,8,17,167,51,4,0.09742382337901052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19040286533001932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090169953282166,0.0,0.0,0.08106442551110724,0.0,0.0,0.1325030814059651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812100252332579,0.0,0.16034301118639568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153288906073584,0.07491290656473044,0.08134482312565264,0.05938865847660881,0.0,0.0,0.2195265740684002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454037901264944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778499551948148,0.0,0.0,0.06283030640764496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165614199657366,0.0,0.08525624436653233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573900660635004,0.0,0.08208377305186418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24630206179394776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934578087401221,0.11073640791836496,0.08171448080832132,0.0,0.10741010921166913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17454521951700588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060227040978262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10429421789467268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708317095202356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996224600710189,0.0,0.1903854361423378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16362294964292112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300623172277523,0.09877246563259057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20670256169196868,0.1967405784052612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323543982472384,0.14447706116550527,0.15027851715618676,0.0,0.0,0.09142565857041156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508282465530208,0.08506672476250636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19823010574637254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108896397946211,0.12482439187233173,0.1001679163484936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267236586450917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163429513068667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07500161893452965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182080057112688,0.0,0.0,0.07830557888320863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472405927185512,0.06242525221969693,0.0,0.0,0.1704258446218051,0.0,0.09234639309463544,0.0,0.1082414524614291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773304962925473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565198063246914,0.070925703732056,0.0,0.0992831991732942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scistudies,2020/02/20,"Personality Disorder Ruining my Career I’ve always had trouble at work. I’m a teacher and I’ve never really had the confidence that I was any good at my job despite test scores and evaluations. I seem to ruin every job I’ve had by complaining to coworkers who then go and tell administration. I recently was transferred to a new school position after my old principal discriminated against me on recording. He insisted it was because he was tired of my negativity so I ended up with a directive not to spread negativity. I have borderline personality disorder, pervasive depression and anxiety. I was told my disorder didn’t matter, that they weren’t expected to make any sort of accommodation that would help me in venting my frustrations or with emotional outbursts. There are several ADA accommodations I do have that have been ignored. I’m supposed to have a duty-free 30 minute lunch and they do not give me one on Friday I have back to back classes. I recently confided some colleagues about my frustrations with not getting a lunch, the large class sizes of 45 to 50 kids, a teacher’s complaint that I was having a hard time with the large class sizes and behavior management, and the fact I found out I was being transferred again at the end of the year and never had a chance to earn my spot at this new school. I shouldn’t have vented to them. I barely know them, part of my disorder makes me think friendships are closer than they are. I was called in by my principal and accused of calling a teacher a bitch several times by many people and accused of pushing a colleague when they didn’t agree with me. I absolutely did not push anyone and I never swear at school. He said that people overheard because my office is in an open area. He said he couldn’t prove it it happened but that from talking to me he didn’t believe it didn’t. He had also pulled up the directive from HR that had all of the allegations from my old principal on it so he had pretty much made up his mind against me before even talking to me I think. He wanted to place me on leave but I think HR told him to let me finish the year. He told me if I was found to have been negative or retaliate against anyone he would immediately fire me. I kind of just want to isolate myself because I do have emotional outbursts, I cry when I’m upset, uncontrollably. I’m on medicine and going to therapy but it’s a long process. My worry is that it will be seen as retaliating if I’m not social with people. What do I  do?",5.332778091473742,6.451872302277438,6.511142480707696,74.44989836250707,68.21325051759834,9.912516469038213,32.234707321663855,10.090330364082071,3.319549896480332,1994,85,369,49,33,671,223,483,0.139,0.816,0.044000000000000004,-0.9892,3,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,6,2,14,13,3,2,22,0,51,3,0,3,6,61,79,26,0,9,13,0,2,0,0,4,1,2,0,3,19,20,2,1,8,0,0,5,18,11,0,1,33,5,58,2,62,38,4,50,0,3,1,0,37,21,1,7,24,259,77,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571238969261123,0.06837313622179518,0.0,0.0,0.11175865587965383,0.0,0.06286084902229183,0.0,0.0,0.11491222088422567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636937431004486,0.0,0.15027265574692095,0.0,0.06992175683913014,0.0925789596265389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16781224778347087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026135684851648,0.0,0.0,0.07077405342365815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3767018915435752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848633916543456,0.1455588322909387,0.0,0.0,0.05427339408790747,0.0,0.06923289668789477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18019326268525926,0.0,0.0,0.04293113285746561,0.07882623540091957,0.09339973059177767,0.06892142012201265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266384324046513,0.0,0.07360937917992272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055077716083858974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16308474838638778,0.0,0.0,0.08556880415786372,0.04515921866097293,0.0,0.0,0.08700758284282296,0.0,0.08402576087155311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271904877118791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775250728706802,0.1097000130089984,0.08330883991442542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296962744659536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060405388536200234,0.0,0.19012680580808194,0.15872318148679548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724499940499672,0.0,0.05568142556317432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898355203243903,0.0,0.17090177929126898,0.1434976865242047,0.08585155943090657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359779236084584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05264106354593413,0.0,0.16226856704439516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563275198781725,0.0,0.0,0.2494853443722589,0.0,0.074805700410094,0.0,0.18566044667550632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376333149694687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320924185461491,0.07182137167751355,0.0,0.09397008685195267,0.0,0.0,0.15795622728908776,0.0,0.0,0.09582953654102833,0.0944438656874503,0.0,0.23555470587123256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09693356883976192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05982171306739351,0.08344898291538888,0.0,0.1167443224867965,0.0,0.0,0.1058312957724488
mentalhealth,someboi331,2020/02/20,"I don't know what to do I don't know what to do. I don't have any motivation to do anything. I don't enjoy even the things I use to like. I have a hard time getting out of bed. I also have a hard time getting to sleep. I feel mentally numb. I've considered suicide as a means of escape once or twice over the past couple months. I don't know who to talk to or what to do. I told my parents and they asked if it was ""electronics"" fault (they're Boomers). They also asked if I wanted to speak to the pastor, while I am a Christian and believe all that is real I just don't know if that would help. I've been going through the motions for a while now and don't think I can hold on much longer. I'm tired of living without feeling.",0.9261185983827502,2.4138764591195,2.7914869721473505,95.27731132075472,80.0062893081761,5.549146451033244,21.420035938903855,6.1826913282559595,0.039448876909254686,563,16,135,4,14,188,87,159,0.147,0.8059999999999999,0.048,-0.9088,1,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,2,1,5,4,0,0,9,0,20,3,1,2,1,26,37,13,1,5,7,1,4,1,0,1,2,1,1,0,8,4,0,1,9,0,0,2,8,2,0,1,3,5,17,2,20,33,2,12,2,0,0,0,10,3,0,5,8,92,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533870777958107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773538812163004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037143256941292,0.0,0.2962146054986488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784923068151843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17529580389338406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463914639480544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16021030117015278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16554251568239772,0.0,0.09003737694014953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838378816538705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618987983422534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3482680360757786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739913909118037,0.0,0.13989341818454842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17257279941513534,0.0,0.0,0.15965655402406614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645444505211262,0.0,0.11646163650345348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16871895092277311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759137743310501,0.0,0.15123592996226906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18032393292558446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585408187266927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17329277350232694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733714331101753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525146392779336,0.10151324339204278,0.0,0.0,0.18475942165734627,0.18208784716418466,0.0,0.15138321926038684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368295475439344,0.0,0.0,0.09344399839787014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15271740102961032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254157268727094,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ToughHeat,2020/02/20,"What am I going through? Is there a name for this? Hi guys,

I was diagnosed with bipolar a few years back, and things are usually fine.   
However, I still experience these ""episodes"" or ""meltdowns"" from time to time, but I have no idea what it is, or what it is called. I don't think it's an anxiety attack, but more like a depression attack? This is what happens to me:

\- Severely depressed very suddenly  
\- Hyper-ventilating  
\- Crying so hard that I'm unable to speak   
\- Wanting to die/hurt myself etc.  
\- Collapsing on the floor, bawling. 

It's like what you see in movies when people see a loved one die. It's brutal, and it is emotionally extremely painful. 

It literally feels like someone just told me that my boyfriend is dead. It is intense and I can't see any way out other than actually dying. I want to scream and die.  Then after a while, my body gets exhausted and I usually cry myself to sleep. 

Is there a name for having an episode like this?",3.3045329670329657,5.375975428571434,4.471524725274727,83.2641002747253,74.93406593406593,8.066483516483517,27.309065934065927,8.841846274778883,2.2073945054945057,736,29,144,16,16,241,117,182,0.314,0.583,0.102,-0.9954,1,0,0,0,0,2,40.0,0,1,0,0,7,14,3,0,9,0,15,7,2,0,0,19,28,13,4,2,5,0,2,4,0,0,4,2,0,1,21,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,8,0,1,2,7,15,6,16,26,3,18,0,2,3,1,9,4,0,2,16,99,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.11416546592966145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955728279592582,0.0,0.08949710969759307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26618626613122065,0.0,0.08995816896325741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12994963252635935,0.0,0.0,0.11945997693374301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570162726392892,0.0,0.0,0.20152681109204384,0.11874249340679036,0.4856690323052774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13159812108241614,0.0,0.0,0.1304748914128489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443877080504902,0.0,0.0,0.059153711975421464,0.08357775400353082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06112250099301093,0.0,0.06648817240388913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583859657560967,0.10345396301017884,0.0,0.1048001543997772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252403264736883,0.1320675878533774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286218225672112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055881368757792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927552251129442,0.0,0.12448571956345365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110620800619754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796778994894871,0.0,0.0,0.13216551813299166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170745933165184,0.0,0.0991253358635918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934284485457994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777230270051581,0.07496253508600813,0.0,0.0,0.13643574144282578,0.0,0.0,0.11178905831442623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25769614365532106,0.09652908837622616,0.13800758944179906,0.09286129948097216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533779160242042
mentalhealth,PissYourTits,2020/02/20,"I had a thought I recently found myself feeling the worst I think I ever have. And realised that there’s a possibility that I could feel this bad, or possibly even worse in years to come. But before then, I’m going to have times where I feel better. And that’s what I and people I know look forward to experiencing and experiencing with me. All emotions are temporary but they are worth it because without despair you wouldn’t feel true joy in those moments where everything feels ok.",5.1077329192546586,6.873445239130441,5.6965838509316775,77.62978260869569,69.43478260869566,8.300621118012423,30.534161490683232,8.841846274778883,2.5268335403726705,390,16,71,7,7,126,67,92,0.076,0.7170000000000001,0.20800000000000002,0.9105,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,1,5,7,0,0,3,1,7,0,0,0,3,24,20,8,0,2,4,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,9,0,1,3,2,3,0,0,3,8,12,4,7,15,2,13,0,1,1,0,2,5,0,1,7,51,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16217058471001758,0.11839835775926548,0.0,0.1652720078762298,0.0,0.0,0.1717771001886212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16730848819519467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15507364476747335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218478091102721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828443135093795,0.17568852314481104,0.0,0.0,0.17455779161859158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4910324694505496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21295876759989746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11038310325580528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067415219470557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16310091039587216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465184271648362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379212303555627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19177472866083264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12445216873237072,0.0,0.1541937368938343,0.11325473381928053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18722691863863736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19793287197814008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250751664370892
mentalhealth,locopot,2020/02/20,"Struggling when I'm alone From the summer of 2017 to the summer of 2018 was a really bad year for me. I was depressed, had a lot of social anxiety, and spent a lot of time alone. It got better after the summer of 2018 and it's only gotten better with time! 

Now I go to a school where I live at, which means I'm with people all the time. I have a girlfriend, loads of really good friends and I get along with everyone! I would say I'm doing really good and I'm confident. When I first get to spend time alone, I usually feel fine. But I notice in the vacation, where I spend more time alone, if some days pass, I get back to bad thinking habits that I had before. I guess my brain and body hasn't normalized feeling good when I'm alone. Has anyone else noticed the same as me? And what did you do to get better? Thanks!",1.7603508771929803,3.4383549766081885,3.3472280701754364,91.36926315789476,78.18128654970761,6.665263157894738,19.00233918128655,7.554174236665415,0.3392086549707609,635,13,141,9,15,210,94,171,0.147,0.685,0.16899999999999998,0.7928,0,5,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,4,7,13,0,1,11,0,11,2,2,0,1,24,30,12,0,3,2,0,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,5,10,0,0,4,0,3,2,1,4,0,1,8,3,17,9,21,21,6,24,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,5,18,87,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.539936758056646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976262891752495,0.0,0.0,0.07290468530918821,0.1068320675158538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017353938424764,0.1741142529274024,0.0,0.0,0.08872204608695586,0.0,0.0,0.27664241504886616,0.0,0.11581518500644372,0.0,0.11639449874885978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724245896059361,0.0,0.08980350485273349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710023522539159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962991213349696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543928386810428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868796622238863,0.0,0.0,0.0805550715435957,0.0,0.21789715362607726,0.0,0.059256342922976615,0.2623582282055139,0.08339044320241261,0.0,0.11485992504103393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09206812373178412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17728516965359833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357542088458285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215780489899562,0.0,0.2374133505887724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929841906249653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228439436720611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003849621542279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291590967783831,0.0,0.10552199688165513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062852893494536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900067505360422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095993431379962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06680896052381695,0.0,0.0,0.3039895213533405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148334395898897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406704027685049,0.0,0.0,0.06714340089142896
mentalhealth,tac0-bella,2020/02/20,Typically how long is treatment for body dysmorphia? I finally found a therapist and my insurance is covering it!!! I just have to pay $20 each session as a co-pay. This is kind of a lot to me as a college student without a job. My boyfriend thinks that it should only take me 5-6 sessions.,2.511694915254239,4.214618474576273,4.812000000000001,81.58003389830509,76.11864406779661,8.787796610169492,33.83389830508475,9.3871,3.374061694915253,226,13,46,6,5,79,46,59,0.045,0.955,0.0,-0.3129,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,5,1,1,1,0,9,8,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,6,1,7,6,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,32,10,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3342618021184551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296505670870066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3299506706175997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29862338522378673,0.0,0.0,0.3133689228453362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663107216237803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558371784062286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22886836868153146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262594800604084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34939917361929274,0.0,0.1928217231713552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900826674511377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sodisfront,2020/02/20,"I just failed an exam that I know all the content for. Please just tell me it's okay... I'm done. I'm finally going to register with Student Disability Services. I can't do this anymore. All I want is my education, so I can save everyone trapped by themselves. I have to accept that I too, am trapped... I have to ask for help... After almost a dozen revolving diagnosis, and over half my life in therapy... I still. Need. Help. I have to accept this, no matter how painful it is.

I may never truly be okay, and maybe this is permanent, maybe coping is life... None of this means I have to give up.",0.21841386554622133,2.604036529411765,2.6803728991596643,89.09266018907564,91.26890756302521,6.000210084033612,21.723214285714285,7.413659706084162,1.0743483193277314,453,17,95,9,16,155,79,119,0.133,0.7340000000000001,0.133,-0.2718,0,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,3,2,15,3,0,1,3,19,24,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,2,0,2,1,0,15,5,14,21,3,8,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,2,4,70,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082479378745623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20624641908627667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19442016419573596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128214524018993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19872045333846827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22781661997540864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19949996552900864,0.1181918871217651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787904916240159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429269101028212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937851137890645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4178596582557785,0.22653597341378534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420417571740466,0.16039622261943168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212905180418945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282842493217166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660819397682955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177147622278708,0.0,0.2378272791079377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266375239017625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Qrious_one,2020/02/20,"Help Please Help, i do not know what to so anymore, i am so tired. About 2 years ago i was so sick, i had stomachache all day long,i could not work anymore, i just lied in my bed all day. I went to the doctor and too many doctors, test and exams before i just knew...i had nothing, i was healthy. So i went to the psychiatrist and did therapy. Nothing happend and i quit. Some months later i was better but without work. Time goes and i did better but never how i was before i got sick. In december a person (my sister in law) do a thing that make me go in the same state, pain all day long but now is diferent and when the pain goes to me i hate and think in vengeance and revenge, i think horrible things and i can not stop, i am suffering too much, i am staring to hate my boyfriend, i hate everyone and i hope the person who did wrong to me, suffer like me. I am full of hate and i am tired, i can stop please help me, i am tired of this life, is like hell.",0.7139563543003861,2.3662840926829247,2.4900898587933256,96.42709884467268,81.24390243902441,5.486521181001284,20.545571245186128,6.339386263674448,-0.04670731707317133,729,20,176,6,19,241,99,205,0.303,0.5579999999999999,0.139,-0.9946,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,5,12,15,5,0,7,0,22,10,0,2,4,36,35,20,0,2,9,1,0,2,0,0,10,0,1,2,6,11,0,2,3,0,0,3,5,10,0,0,12,1,33,5,15,22,7,24,1,2,1,0,7,6,1,2,16,119,39,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094593314375043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034970489160327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17460475610809587,0.0,0.0,0.1814771846049793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191525071715566,0.0,0.0,0.1984994767041773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100244836049321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803570406892273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05830816443177804,0.0,0.08205608774414849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40517266583055295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063055539194769,0.0,0.0,0.10190183951386768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05638455551447673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246720202027676,0.10024729467644374,0.0,0.0,0.1815899992947596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848420606964756,0.10401712093971764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189184120866927,0.0,0.0754205029290367,0.0,0.07912902950009372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19688892380315764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21834060234416933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17916725558884325,0.0,0.22524110361183106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912439801915154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17155115126807274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732845996698142,0.0,0.1363216005163408,0.13147986067254938,0.0,0.0,0.05982505879462634,0.3537600214809228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902166490253803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889971957698747,0.0,0.1493834836577696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121735692349678,0.0,0.06606901922339507
mentalhealth,ShneedlezKupo,2020/02/20,"[Discussion] Questioning wanting to work in mental health field? Hi there, I hope this is the appropriate subreddit to discuss this in. I'm (22 y/o) a front office admin at a mental health center in the US and love my job, love who i work with, but sometimes realize it's an exhausting field. In high school I wanted to do artsy things, then thought psychology was more practical, and even considered the art therapy field. I graduated w my bachelor's recently in psychology but have no desire to go to grad school quite yet. I have a terrible mindset where I feel like I'm letting clients down, therapists down bc such high demand for services and we are a small business and can only provide so much. By the time I get home it's rare I want to do anything besides lay down and let my brain turn off/ watch TV. I'm second guessing my choices. When looking for higher paying jobs in related fields that don't require a masters, it's been hard bc I feel like no matter what, I'm gonna be stuck with something I don't like. I start paying student loans soon and know my current salary will eventually be too low if I wanna move out of my parents. I don't know what I'm looking for with this post, maybe words of wisdom or opinions? Is it foolish for me to start pursuing artistic stuff now also? Lol oi vey",3.3284038054968303,5.264024003875972,4.6712332628611675,82.45972515856238,74.46511627906976,7.6366455250176175,28.7815362931642,8.438071523408619,2.2258775193798455,1035,44,197,19,22,343,164,258,0.098,0.78,0.122,0.7989,5,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,2,0,0,5,11,10,0,0,10,1,18,6,1,0,0,33,44,14,0,7,4,1,3,3,0,2,3,0,1,0,13,11,0,1,7,3,3,3,5,3,0,1,4,6,22,7,30,34,2,32,0,1,3,2,10,18,0,6,13,120,35,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492575711995337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768143704184644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251042472591185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840139506969576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200383560936582,0.16960112665038754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06201677202085465,0.0,0.06746094749177163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307633746850334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633346439643432,0.0,0.0,0.2523488470065067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508298599327593,0.1190675468080287,0.11789763426360605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235586367924094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047076943605326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24276119026026485,0.0,0.17397505687918738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19935917051684116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21426595137135354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925187570396135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392469166420575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261611888162363,0.08725945392864777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027803979582577,0.0,0.0,0.1318042605918527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368347691728616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297314092323173,0.12625393641836322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720367084132312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240265043022086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913824165304364,0.1173990789697104,0.0,0.1680354378503422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588511967972414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13574581114423198,0.13782189597603628,0.07886017699277027,0.0,0.0,0.09423594084004827,0.06921595267775044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911343225779393,0.0,0.0,0.14278360572889892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100401261199639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17283259463545111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Blue_Shalidor,2020/02/20,"I don't know whether my feeling of uneasiness comes from my mental or physical state Hello ! I've been feeling light headed all day and was having a very strong heart ache (to the point if feeling like tearing up but notbeing able too), also i felt unable to focud.
 Im quite young (20m) and don't smoke nor drink.
I've had a lot of small issues pilling up and my friends tell me to be a little more carefree andless of a overthinking/paranoid person over this.

Those symptoms fluctuate through the day and i wish i could know whether it is just a chemical inbalance.
Thank you for the read and im open to any advices",2.9243237250554337,4.976975756097564,3.6408277900960826,88.87569844789358,75.99186991869921,6.749150036954916,28.2549889135255,7.686295010490155,1.7048439024390252,490,21,98,7,11,155,88,123,0.031,0.7829999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.9507,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,2,3,4,0,0,8,0,9,5,2,0,1,23,18,12,0,3,6,0,4,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,3,7,1,0,6,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,5,9,4,13,12,3,12,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,3,4,59,12,1,0.17601795426204891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17200270774962678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14076149442982522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969824481103518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162388190194714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405360137669525,0.0,0.0,0.227034037793964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17243058444175546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26699989926797985,0.125747261694858,0.16900483939284208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359910348314449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806452022538962,0.0,0.0,0.208582123293935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38025919087122667,0.18371701334937385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19346972879047653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599348144214304,0.1764162317463367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496441702519836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738469803147344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15369208833262712,0.0,0.0,0.16639386080837207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872167608359411,0.1760655872202657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829500505492448,0.0,0.0,0.15384745033041272,0.16205368352652366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14523324635762042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024119606504281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Richi4k,2020/02/20,i feel like my psychiatrist isn't taking me seriously like sometimes i wonder if she cares at all. i've been taking meds for years and been seeing this one psychiatrist since a year and we changed hella drugs and i'm still not feeling good. like WTF. she's supposed to be the best doctor in the city.,1.7742142857142833,4.364748183333333,3.092857142857145,88.15500000000004,83.83333333333334,5.428571428571429,20.238095238095237,6.868970318607317,0.42280952380952375,241,7,48,3,7,78,48,60,0.121,0.642,0.237,0.7851,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,1,1,7,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,1,10,12,4,0,1,2,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,3,7,6,4,9,2,5,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,2,6,28,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360741175950012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293544034735523,0.0,0.23797026746391134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302487545446913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26087386610460783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22748582080899105,0.16070634737820852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18867976178588255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3297017711869827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24987188319955805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243386007658036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17925828152575307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860833063600538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22248410183830467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796476213798951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382730662979673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24395174931969896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897244955267444
mentalhealth,GreatElder,2020/02/20,"How to thrive with bipolar disorder 1. Become vegetarian/vegan
2. Drink non caffeinated tea
3. Intermittent fast
4. Study/ Practice neuroplasticity
5. Run 4 miles everyday after work to help you sleep
6. Study the esoteric, science, and philosophy(stoicism preferably) to know your true power
7. Believe that God made you like this for a specific reason
8. Be mindful of the media you consume. Negative energy could be transmuted to your mind/soul.

That is all.",4.162307692307692,7.538907666666669,6.006538461538465,63.57596153846157,87.71794871794874,9.266666666666667,29.57692307692308,9.075114841892004,4.207953846153846,370,18,53,13,12,126,68,78,0.075,0.7829999999999999,0.14300000000000002,0.5859,1,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,5,0,2,1,2,0,0,3,0,4,4,1,3,2,11,6,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,5,2,8,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,27,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956791025131376,0.0,0.3016322262723486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21375509064169526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30683383850298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622666903578789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17944913387866954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14713360051114993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079597127852152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533260469318597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5406479731606275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27526391041700904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26791642150206696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19490558723853893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Idffk,2020/02/20,"Mid Life Crisis (and I’m only 18) 
I’ve just turned 18 (birthday was yesterday) I’m female and I was made homeless when I was 17. I spent a few weeks in homeless sheltered accommodation but was given a flat quicker than most due to mental health circumstances and letters from my psychologist. I suffer with severe social anxiety and borderline personality disorder so have days where I feel alright but equally, days where I completely crash and hit an all time low. I’ve made my flat feel homely, but I can’t stand my life. It’s one massive routine. Wake up. Feed my cat. Go to college. Come home. I recently adopted a homeless cat to make myself feel better, and although I look after it I can’t feel love towards it because I find my life so boring. I do meet friends and socialise but I never enjoy it. I feel like a middle aged woman and I’ve literally only just turned 18. Im really suicidal and don’t know how much longer I can keep this going. I’m about to crack. The only thing I take pride in is how I look but recently I’ve been letting that slip and am starting to get into debt and I’m only fucking 18. 

This is life. Starting off with a poor family, having an unfair disadvantage in life, and I’ll be growing up to have a mediocre job after graduating college and looking after cats lmaoo. How exiting",1.7976794871794866,4.372527511538465,3.9015384615384616,82.5267948717949,83.5,6.235897435897436,24.82051282051281,7.554174236665415,1.6066435897435896,1043,42,191,18,30,355,148,260,0.187,0.7240000000000001,0.08900000000000001,-0.9828,2,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,3,11,11,1,0,9,1,18,10,1,6,2,41,49,25,1,0,7,0,5,1,1,0,6,0,2,2,8,17,1,1,7,0,3,4,4,4,0,1,9,8,23,7,22,37,5,35,0,2,3,2,7,14,1,1,17,116,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514756180208398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678501295129752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843969727062514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587888554793472,0.11670054636963564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14356426080167128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275644860435862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492788304354447,0.0,0.2813942463208581,0.07951588602515955,0.0,0.0,0.1017302056951342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599350379764853,0.10289912481540524,0.05815195539147456,0.0,0.12651371173878295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831137300469086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22329477800696967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022785257427307,0.0,0.1104524430403644,0.09893246537764823,0.0,0.0,0.06116998770578848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381629071284935,0.39308794901425576,0.054377707928567394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804029913120497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045656715145407,0.21063783014272872,0.07429655169039075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216865672594407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182154128623133,0.0,0.08584481543796077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754227424240995,0.3386080488853072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971867093892007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130444913359904,0.0,0.2197993354504091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257422911349729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134608195135176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756365524432744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174894881634026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368705724431685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739456979977167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490249107356698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24213445196956046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928167637983431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jonasty69420,2020/02/20,"Given up on myself, need help Hi guys new member here usually lurking and not posting tbh! Where to start hmm I'm a 22 year old male who has suffered from depression ever since I graduated from high school. Im diagnosed bipolar 1 although lately I do no agree with the diagnosis Let's talk about my drug use I guess. I've been smoking flower since the age of 13. I've basically experimented with every drug except heroin and crack I've done drugs cut with meth a couple times. At this moment in time I do adderall regularly and smoke weed maybe 2. Or 3 times a week. In the summer of 2015 I took acid by myself and hung out with my friend then made the stupid decision to drive somewhere. On the road I started freaking out and eventually the cops were called. I then had a massive seizure and apparently It took 8 people to restrain me I was on life support and in the hospital for two weeks. I was on lithium at the time and did not do my research. I took a year off after graduating hs. Fast forward a year I'm in school at DePaul in Chicago I decided to trip CID again at a concert. Thinking I was safe cause I had not been on lithium for like 6 months at that point the same dam thing happened. At the end of the semester I needed to come home because I was suicidal at that point. A broken heart, 2 weeks in the hospital and getting jumped and stabbed in the head all within that short semester took a toll on me. Those experiences fucked me up and continue to fuck me up. For the past few years I've been in and out of the local community college here in Pittsburgh. I can never just the do work. I developed a gambling problem like 5 months ago and went to rehab for it( technically it was for weed). I got out of rehab like 2 months ago and I had an incredibly hard time readjusting. I'm still madly in love with my ex who I haven't dated In two years, we talk occasionally (mainly when her and her bf are having problems) I hate that I still love her. I hate that i still think about her constantly. I've been with several women since trying to fill the void she left in me and nothing has worked. I know though that even if we got back together it wouldn't be the same. Yet I still lament on the times we were together, it's pretty fucking sad. I sleep alot to cope. I'm not working rn as well. I have no motivation at all to find a job. I have no hope for myself whatsoever. I've given up on taking care of myself. I'm not living life at this point I'm merely existing. Life doesn't seem real at this point. I go through the motions but I'm not really experiencing life whatsoever. Please guys give me some advice. I'm seeing my shrink today, hopefully he can help me out. I just want to be happy and live a productive and fulfilling life. The only thing holding me back from taking my life right now is the strain it would put on my family who I love very much even though I don't show it. Thanks if you read this whole thing and take the time to respond.",2.6094472745797206,4.412032221854306,4.197947019867552,85.65366276108001,76.11920529801324,7.295160468670403,24.032603158430966,8.139509932561175,1.322489658685686,2338,75,487,40,52,781,300,604,0.08199999999999999,0.8290000000000001,0.08900000000000001,0.8654,3,0,5,0,0,0,48.0,3,1,0,4,23,30,8,1,37,0,37,22,3,4,4,80,88,30,1,11,13,1,1,3,2,2,13,1,1,4,24,34,0,3,8,3,1,14,14,15,1,2,26,5,61,15,82,57,10,119,0,3,1,6,31,54,3,9,55,309,85,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05995392857494521,0.10877234897782656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435410631533772,0.0,0.03740052317276813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06264878161669751,0.0,0.06255398063303587,0.06302694347380376,0.0,0.05285060627672005,0.0,0.06630133555976735,0.0,0.0,0.06788647903685323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052843678284892996,0.06227250941283995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627859303608456,0.0,0.0,0.213451739153392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05434098891484323,0.0,0.0,0.08104681413236359,0.05549775187276787,0.05169296857149327,0.0,0.0,0.12003098853141853,0.05783861798655996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05607598604131976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04740156068348305,0.17016096194982944,0.03205467065091905,0.05885586627348685,0.03486860704263214,0.0,0.09813999486655453,0.0,0.06758779556152894,0.1214992188333534,0.05425469602761893,0.06531193992917289,0.0549606835269134,0.12114775526668425,0.06296638986115105,0.0,0.0,0.07270419103040039,0.08224791342611454,0.06482333961897452,0.0615425613713142,0.12187573502121532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662723066041658,0.0,0.06088388017932996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03371827819769721,0.0,0.06920941858530938,0.0,0.06666075554860572,0.06273810895866302,0.2600147422250468,0.08992266072574619,0.0,0.10835252630182914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612178316709958,0.058054163668237325,0.0,0.0,0.06163783563113188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691533127116366,0.0,0.04510188076092166,0.09098568333854826,0.047319600302833234,0.059255591089538685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05887033644466329,0.0,0.06438017581992801,0.0,0.0,0.046662100241087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856885653262388,0.042534790676855234,0.0,0.0,0.06734771715270606,0.23199554883137966,0.0,0.05875969181062106,0.06241856487150298,0.0,0.11741402402933095,0.0,0.06167721185963114,0.0,0.0,0.061370101545581625,0.06983371318939846,0.03930462213241099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052395552418786635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418603181107213,0.048890794774586924,0.05585392068310864,0.0,0.06931198963284475,0.0,0.15225674370172326,0.0,0.06139780718037699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868526439293618,0.0,0.19598793235927173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671107691930775,0.06962322293241048,0.0,0.0,0.1383905858187771,0.0986272359976601,0.0,0.056486058240423576,0.0,0.0,0.12228161440552188,0.07862568888058799,0.12055900137307715,0.0,0.25043002823335586,0.0,0.05815594262358705,0.0,0.2726639769195826,0.04165499807612345,0.0,0.11986690588394155,0.0,0.0,0.0529897236822221,0.06757221054998856,0.050623061652650576,0.03618788298101513,0.0,0.14764222693380485,0.0,0.05516416333634518,0.0568753077074871,0.0,0.06849898992347538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399823269389596,0.0,0.0,0.04358376495797719,0.0,0.0,0.19754820713727808
mentalhealth,pronoov,2020/02/20,"I need someone to tell me it's gets better even though I know it won't. It's been 10 months now. 10 months of hell. My anxiety and depression has risen to an unbearable level. I have tried with the different therapists and all of them were greedy and not helpful at all. None of the medicines have worked, even though they reduce the level of my anxiety attacks. I'm 16 years old and my illness is mainly related to my school stress. I am extremely anti social. Even my parents don't know what to do anymore. I was always good in studies and that was the only thing I liked about myself, I have no other hobbies or interests, I used to play sports and was in the soccer team but my knee got badly injured and I haven't been able to play ever since. I was very fat and I reduced my weight and became extremely fit but now again I have gained 16 kgs in the last 10 months. Nothing makes sense to me. I don't like anything. I have no will to live anymore. I don't know why I am ranting about stuff here when I know nobody cares. I cry every night. I keep on staring at the fan and think about dying.",2.1976666666666667,4.043312711111113,3.3770555555555566,90.88825000000004,77.44444444444444,6.277777777777778,22.805555555555557,7.1686216300943375,0.7196888888888884,860,26,182,10,20,278,129,225,0.159,0.73,0.111,-0.8145,2,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,2,4,14,13,2,1,8,0,23,5,2,2,3,27,36,16,1,1,4,1,1,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,8,11,2,1,5,5,0,0,9,5,0,0,8,2,31,8,22,26,4,21,1,1,1,0,7,9,1,1,14,123,39,3,0.12740974008728154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601511033409278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19493620486195226,0.0,0.2527124522962729,0.0,0.0,0.10484736007841863,0.0,0.0,0.14494697281656815,0.0,0.0,0.1063818110644813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126835612644958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299027214330336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399536167853901,0.0,0.0,0.1097378224418546,0.0,0.13223119480683326,0.13311606061036876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524587950933169,0.11524940425422613,0.10734820116056544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656633055251,0.0,0.0,0.10686524507103692,0.10190120824906056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540006309844883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324763111351488,0.0,0.0,0.280084244397632,0.10385594332261687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449192658417592,0.0,0.1125051347517167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504699086110629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.305091716933532,0.0,0.0,0.0944727078717646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11956541009941825,0.0,0.12225308187343913,0.0,0.1336950895964101,0.0,0.0,0.09690084863915134,0.0,0.0,0.14147343844075047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894545904971472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539465361612456,0.0,0.0,0.12987818493207126,0.10795385931571948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145947426797404,0.0,0.14585366988669085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136172864790043,0.0,0.0,0.1479325283461932,0.08464536992291281,0.08163901686810765,0.2503588454823406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650285012427357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004110761050137,0.0,0.10512637899943032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515073904248525,0.0,0.0,0.1149674731114169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275580822622168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204769532379355
mentalhealth,Joshua20401,2020/02/20,"What should I do if I have depression, anger issues, misphonia, a great issue with things being perfect (not sure if it’s OCD) and sleeping issues? What could happen if it carries on and how could I control and get rid of the problems. I’m only 12 years old.",3.60029411764706,5.167446627450979,4.653088235294117,84.41139705882355,72.92156862745098,6.668627450980392,26.47549019607843,7.1686216300943375,1.3593490196078433,202,7,38,2,4,66,40,51,0.171,0.659,0.171,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,1,6,1,0,2,0,6,1,1,2,2,16,9,7,0,7,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,3,5,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,27,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393099844345507,0.3407134445193257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18377326114271136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114758009201456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23523860894572626,0.0,0.0,0.1886803255357876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6681012370843353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238934768996136,0.0,0.0,0.16227572741703247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20416404383726855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21352176114082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20109650345917546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175199876603245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740178366384492
mentalhealth,deedeemegadoodoo-,2020/02/20,"Different person The love of my life has an undiagnosed mental illness that my therapist believes to be bpd. They jumped off their medication and have since left me, tried to get back together 4-5 times now and the last time made me believe their mind was changed and then by the night took it all back and completely stopped talking to me. They just started meds again but is still no where near stable. 
I’m aware the illness is at play but I’ve never been so personally manipulated and used for being loving and forgiving. I just don’t know how to let go or whether I should stand by until their meds kick in and I can properly communicate with them. 
It’s so incredibly hard to watch someone you love hurt you and themselves with no self awareness.",5.525833333333335,6.807232138888893,5.677388888888893,80.0065,67.8888888888889,9.093333333333334,31.06666666666667,9.3871,2.6726799999999997,604,24,116,12,10,191,107,144,0.139,0.722,0.139,0.4641,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,6,0,11,6,0,0,5,0,12,7,0,4,2,27,23,17,0,1,6,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,3,10,0,1,2,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,4,2,16,5,16,15,1,24,0,1,1,3,16,6,0,1,14,80,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187272892248968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3204818412520133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17912969954484087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504571158149522,0.0,0.1491221136599256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148596754336859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430764269061464,0.0,0.08083077881098337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12740729355872316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15225675125968569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07816414012618747,0.1159338401810515,0.0,0.0,0.15452985490743704,0.1454365585082534,0.10045900835045747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3850957709451516,0.13457845496341594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159638661595189,0.1432785570424029,0.14333118136728426,0.0,0.1436085428014252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096940907569368,0.0,0.0,0.1334702348481693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.248373944674888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483735906509624,0.0,0.0,0.11765149434262714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050832212806853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066887446951757,0.0,0.11358252131197268,0.11890798911311475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431652959234083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651362988980869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586720374092415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580192290242844,0.09656267403359127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283830635895385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lefreakchic,2020/02/20,"My brain is always obsessing about something So at the minute I'm fine and happy and not obsessing about anything but in the past and probably again in the future, I will just have random obsessive thoughts in my head for ages that are intense, and then one day they'll stop for no reason, like my brain has got tired of the thought. The thoughts have got so bad that sometimes I think I have a mental health disorder.

Usually my brain focuses on one at a time. 

For example:
- I had thoughts daily that my boyfriend would leave me or fall out of love with me

- I used to overthink every social situation and be scared and overanalyse everything I said

- over analyse everything that someone else said and what It meant they thought about me

- time where I thought I couldn't trust any of my own thoughts

- scared that people in my family would die and I couldn't cope with them dying

- feeling guilty for happiness when others aren't or that I don't deserve it

- thinking intensely about others all the time

- felt guilty I was betraying my boyfriend even though I wasn't

My brain so quickly forgets about all these obsessive thoughts that it scares me.",9.452916666666667,7.900445865740743,7.966407407407413,76.41933333333334,60.25,11.973333333333334,39.19259259259259,10.793553405168565,3.9966125925925926,921,38,174,18,10,277,122,216,0.24100000000000002,0.6759999999999999,0.083,-0.9909,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,3,0,15,14,0,7,8,0,18,8,5,2,2,40,38,17,2,4,5,0,2,1,0,4,2,2,0,0,14,11,0,1,14,0,0,1,7,8,0,2,17,4,28,6,24,14,3,24,0,0,0,1,7,10,0,3,14,120,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508914613203181,0.0,0.0,0.061368122822715615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426204356790013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534887556724243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029627422447102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819906857561776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187315326631706,0.0,0.103425939430988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538618666229474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05960444474169295,0.0,0.07603335730684288,0.0,0.16220861931873426,0.0,0.08507277544766985,0.0,0.045629414861226375,0.0,0.08664713302911434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14435064384937316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19213004020730048,0.0,0.0,0.09261503355168148,0.09592375807636012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955539772446036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044088019330821716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814475497992543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094340483313593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230156263097545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614685747132686,0.06256291768255241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972968814850532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927845138112105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168292451163508,0.0,0.2710460228517721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014365630416521,0.0,0.09199105652952493,0.07646233722843232,0.0694732305669915,0.0892523265556084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754469284956052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564774206933726,0.08866298339277731,0.5731409165348569,0.15786371235960026,0.10372069534552564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794070848821595,0.09938957213600168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821163362843835,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JelliFishies,2020/02/20,"How do I (16F) go about telling my parents (47M, 42F) about my suicidal thoughts? So for the past two-ish years I've been wanting more and more to die due to a variety of things in my life (school, stress, etc). It's gotten worse recently though, I'm less motivated which has started majorly affecting my grades (my last progress report had two Fs when I usually get As and Bs) and at night I often become tempted to cut myself.

I know I should get help, but talking about my feelings has always been stressful and uncomfortable for me.

Plus my mom is pretty emotionally abusive… Just this morning she called me and my sister p*ssies because we didn't talk back to her while she was yelling at us. And whenever I cry in front of her she'll hit me or in one case, call me a b*tch. (Which is where I'm pretty sure my discomfort about discussing my feelings comes from.) Even a few months ago she said to all of us that the only reason she doesn't beat me and my two sisters is because our dad is against that kind of parenting.

I know my dad will want to help me but I'm scared my mom will think I'm just attention seeking or being a crybaby (especially since I'll undoubtedly start crying while telling them).

tldr: I want to tell my parents about how I'm suicidal but I'm sure my mom won't understand and thus am afraid to.

Also sorry if this sounds too formal,,,",5.09435681965094,5.445410329670332,5.6714759750053885,83.00342598577895,68.41391941391942,9.060892049127343,31.077138547726783,9.007467420416297,2.374614048696402,1072,41,222,18,17,347,164,273,0.145,0.764,0.091,-0.9564,3,0,0,0,2,1,35.0,4,0,1,3,18,9,1,5,6,0,20,1,0,6,4,42,45,24,3,5,8,10,2,0,0,5,1,3,0,0,8,11,0,0,10,0,0,3,3,6,0,3,8,5,42,3,28,30,7,24,0,0,0,0,33,6,0,4,15,141,50,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831789223535962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503968617037139,0.07807810229650597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072153198461737,0.0,0.11440169279071928,0.10363320651256527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19163172223870867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083040436550515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061463271358145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738574739375602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555156309961697,0.0,0.0,0.10465064866126844,0.06197702562345561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489142718443484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804966009096372,0.0,0.0533285009477619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579102812261034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771454424373273,0.1031383461131264,0.07648791706474052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627832121420353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296946850640097,0.07489807257815805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805763906151343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358491479802797,0.07136562277606615,0.0,0.0,0.31257744949768185,0.0,0.089575970651496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909275292722798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647784179280876,0.09265058235811223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925841904642817,0.0,0.09394504261228624,0.09496586581503462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762114778366895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050404189423475,0.1328335628216986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21497498014176905,0.0,0.0,0.20528016586050007,0.0,0.17687644894139692,0.0,0.0,0.15084177701580234,0.2460473534542093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06233969696338128,0.06012557540455095,0.0921922520610684,0.0744943800413523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27498900642438123,0.0976853757818938,0.2257435134413787,0.0,0.10334581734084124,0.0,0.16603865616062904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562571661369144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060426559275329986
mentalhealth,DRMOOSE2017,2020/02/20,"FOR THOSE SEEKING HELP so i have to say i run a mental health channel on yt sub if u wanna-

jamies mental health talks
————————————-
But if your looking help please seek help from a councillor or from family/friends do not keep it to urself! Your amazing",3.41,5.2529933333333325,3.84,88.905,74.0,6.466666666666668,24.5,7.1686216300943375,0.9701499999999994,192,6,38,2,4,60,38,48,0.0,0.7140000000000001,0.28600000000000003,0.9352,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,7,4,5,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,7,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,3,0,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18628537208781706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5125893740592533,0.0,0.0,0.4848442625656757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21431469018644905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024764401352003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4859757779832317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646726050399537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19174486212176828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937996459494108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thelovelymajor,2020/02/20,"I hate my way of coping with problems. Besides from having my inner dialogue, I tend to make up conversations in my mind with the people I want/should talk to about my issues and problems. 

I play out the full interaction that I should make in real life in my head and after I ""played trough"" enough of the possible scenarios I just step down from
even attempted to seek out that conversation anymore. 

I had it, and my problems resolved (or maybe not), not the way intended but just so much that I don’t feel the urge to talk about them or seek help with it anymore.

Never really making that social bonding fucks me up, and so does  the fact that I don’t really solve my issues.",10.824090909090906,6.8651356515151525,10.260545454545458,68.5208181818182,59.90909090909091,13.590303030303032,38.521212121212116,11.20814326018867,4.025519393939393,534,16,103,10,5,174,76,132,0.091,0.826,0.083,-0.2756,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,2,7,8,2,0,6,0,5,3,1,4,2,30,12,9,0,4,7,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,2,2,0,1,5,5,0,0,1,1,19,3,22,10,3,15,0,0,0,1,8,10,1,2,2,77,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088531081872212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136266465767271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089429917998474,0.0,0.10284770014994317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873373198932143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439551842491124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373544464261935,0.15980759893628224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043718846763363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32505014714804153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10998547991145036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118211298740612,0.0,0.15643575147886593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572268605747877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144677865097098,0.0,0.12009632001605305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079525566626052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554426096216158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4469921168170174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723674573390488,0.1995088905026716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587309241689335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503142042804739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09184421566069856,0.2471972230095332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TopDog2020uk,2020/02/20,"This is how my life has been for too many years now.. can anyone relate? I have done well for myself in life.. didn’t have much as a kid.. lost people i love.. got through a lot of hard times all whilst dealing with really bad mental health problems which i still have today and somehow i still managed to do very well for myself.. Turns out ALL the people i grew up with that know about my struggles and success, arent my real friends, they just want to try and make me suffer by playing games and telling lies about me to other people as much as they can.. All because they want to see me crumble and probably die as well.. The only people i see and have seen for years is my family.. i refuse to put myself around people that i know don’t really like me.. They pretend to like me and they think i don’t know that they really hate me.. I’m not being big headed but i think people are jealous of me because of how well ive done in life.. i just can’t take the hate.... i don’t know what I’m going to do for the rest of my life with no friends.. Absolutely sick to death of these people directing hate at me on social media every time i go online.. i feel like I’m trapped.. i should delete social media but if i delete it then they win but maybe it is for the best that i delete it anyway.. i have tried to make new friends a few times but some people just show you instantly that they don’t like you and for me that is really hard to take because it makes me think that something is wrong with me... Can anyone relate to this post or is this just how my life is? I really feel like its going to be me on my own for life.. Nobody likes me.. does anyone have any ideas on what i can do to change my life? Please share your story and outcome if its similar to mine",3.6559873188405843,4.0154527690217385,4.530760869565217,89.88960144927537,71.58152173913044,7.328985507246378,22.39855072463768,6.996647511020387,0.4555268115942028,1361,26,307,11,24,441,162,368,0.138,0.7440000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.7878,1,1,1,0,0,0,46.0,0,3,8,4,20,29,4,1,8,0,36,11,1,6,3,55,68,24,2,6,12,0,4,6,3,1,9,0,0,1,21,15,0,1,10,4,0,5,9,10,4,0,7,7,57,19,48,58,11,28,0,2,3,1,23,10,0,6,18,216,78,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04941346387114178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152423384935746,0.0,0.0,0.06468564844503026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606707321214479,0.132884426483566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625553948593587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686802480483894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491256272352165,0.0,0.0,0.07541292367509753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358805102633977,0.1487193518425243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061221875160447324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850039275513188,0.0,0.0734813886753584,0.10382120109552406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684182110702916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12388850358421502,0.0,0.0581153944144011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018389922660026,0.21521958267827665,0.07457340071410196,0.07723757768806751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202790180355311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597351651870915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35926914142598204,0.2129973983379559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932046020466146,0.061775649358491475,0.06558136984285842,0.0,0.14550973936160538,0.07366907411075327,0.07299994530107752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322740931839905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068316171329049,0.0,0.0,0.07017856587642007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055263633616497165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4030040783891419,0.0,0.0,0.07976236702602241,0.0,0.0,0.06959125420550953,0.0,0.0783432133312187,0.06952886359455031,0.0,0.07304658001005418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827066231446714,0.23274951467442004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11580631629019815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14814195185410733,0.0,0.05593967699730313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605784170876955,0.0,0.0,0.07596334758408996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926735817929184,0.0,0.06351083460388615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396789227453864,0.0,0.0,0.1271114788663213,0.0,0.06887621194002813,0.0,0.0,0.09866707842472182,0.07903668966894281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05995474522713552,0.08571726930793233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26133175280405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944579613992332,0.0,0.09358542958353656
mentalhealth,drownfloating,2020/02/20,"Started a blog Hello all, I started a blog for me to be able to get out all the garbage that goes on in my head. It’s pretty random and I just started it so not many posts. Just wanted to say that I’ll be writing a lot more on there and it’d be great to hear from anyone who might be feeling the same way as me or get advice from people who have been there. Anyways I just want to talk about my crazy brain ideas with a community of support! If you’d like to check it out it is: 

[That Specific Feeling ](thatspecificfeeling.blogspot.com)

It’s mostly just nonsense thoughts but I’m all about interacting with y’all so check it out and leave some comments!",1.3475438596491252,3.7627570375939854,2.329654135338348,94.15262656641606,83.88721804511276,4.74967418546366,20.89674185463659,6.079149491110277,0.020664561403508586,518,16,111,4,15,163,82,133,0.038,0.863,0.099,0.6842,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,0,11,3,0,0,6,0,10,2,2,0,3,32,23,9,0,3,8,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,12,8,0,0,4,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,9,3,21,14,8,11,0,0,0,0,11,6,0,7,4,80,21,0,0.19240133025057327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18801235315154471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345314836649522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147835154999161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945677871756536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010435079677364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121231458376212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19745927262220936,0.0,0.2168502824951512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21719768268248896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20372522817637104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399757139384968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635727306423574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19506475029118767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041074064657587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333868568090118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842672897400621,0.19574132239163852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15300526023919225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4085479555067037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183347495094327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464490122255312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527451647818149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269665790567289,0.15271922040814326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CHunt_Research,2020/02/20,"LGBT+ Therapy UK Research Project Please consider taking part in this research if you...

* Are age 13 - 25
* Identify as having a minority sexual orientation (LGBQ+)
* Have spoken with a therapist or counsellor 

[https://www.linkedin.com/posts/christopher-hunt-b8b77278\_research-mentalhealth-lgbtq-activity-6629058494249209856-ylaJ](https://www.linkedin.com/posts/christopher-hunt-b8b77278_research-mentalhealth-lgbtq-activity-6629058494249209856-ylaJ)

Thank you!",36.07333333333335,47.38147966666668,16.06244444444445,-7.272999999999968,16.222222222222232,12.880000000000004,37.75555555555556,10.793553405168565,7.131062222222222,412,11,22,9,5,88,33,36,0.0,0.863,0.13699999999999998,0.6239,0,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,5,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,5,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,1,14,3,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4265096470131765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4323376223185597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961320707599695,0.0,0.0,0.3626113719406326,0.4504107518478582,0.4572992953845672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PepeBismal,2020/02/20,"I don't think it's normal that tobacco has had a very positive impact on me. I have been using tobacco for about 4 years since I have turned 18, and I have noticed it improving my life in ways that I did not expect, however, I am thinking this is not normal and might have had some strange mental problems. 

So, one of the first things I noticed with tobacco is that it gave me a lot of motivation to do things I did not like doing. I was no longer super annoyed about having to do yard work or homework. Before tobacco, I was a much lazier person, but maybe that could also be attributed to me being less mature or more depressed (I will address that later).

I also noticed that tobacco made math much easier to learn. In high school, I was making D's in Algebra II, and I was ready to go into a job like graphic design that did not require much math. Once, I got to college where I could puffed on a cigar before class, I noticed I was better able to focus on paying attention, and started making A's. I kept going with math and now I'm in Calculus III, where I thought I'd never reach. 

Tobacco has mostly cured me of my depression. When I was in public school, possibly starting in elementary school, I got depressed. Most of my childhood sucked. It wasn't that I was abused or anything. It's just that I didn't expirience much overwhelming happiness by having a lot of friends. This occured up through high school, so I don't know if having a huge lack of dopamine really screwed me up. High school is where I got to my lowest point. In my senior year, when I starting using tobacco, I suddenly felt super comfortable talking to people and was able to think more clearly and have better abilities with social skills. 

Did tobacco just treat my depression, or did it treat some other mental problem I'm not aware of?",5.690463508322664,6.150029453521127,6.491914212548018,77.25940781049937,67.14084507042253,9.609475032010245,31.629321382842512,9.573946990214177,2.9176478873239438,1436,55,265,28,22,475,174,355,0.135,0.698,0.16699999999999998,0.9403,3,0,8,0,1,0,38.0,0,0,0,9,14,21,3,1,9,0,43,3,0,7,2,58,68,19,0,9,13,0,1,2,1,2,1,0,3,1,20,11,1,2,9,1,1,2,11,10,0,2,26,1,39,11,38,36,14,38,0,5,0,1,6,21,2,12,16,197,59,19,0.16158651524361126,0.09572679887058527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12922067786071592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648596699105498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374982230631081,0.0,0.0,0.14291014154409573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901368400761054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783484576085643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757419739164527,0.0,0.0,0.06872270365985307,0.0,0.0,0.06242067042226612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183334037564934,0.0,0.19385324617410749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600592508293298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25608753760526903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017484158547843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0444018614627202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706666719877127,0.07894300929787604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737507687165088,0.0,0.07644853386099658,0.10786025366496477,0.0,0.08116768663301284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628412018115703,0.08570887868410411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23756936217358066,0.0,0.06231274102427885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583204768730501,0.0,0.3679346371861267,0.0,0.08604218256054277,0.05474760231047735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056011872015117085,0.07054555621413974,0.0,0.0,0.07637574314131322,0.0910822585585591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461647235258005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05175822966212632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4088354502971606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683301759924501,0.0,0.0,0.08235855161058303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17155765075598658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493856008220185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073509007080629,0.15530717158588048,0.0,0.06414082185726235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787986392456572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13955886810652965,0.0,0.06666289889242462,0.0,0.06412992728359615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05881845379172863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040564179948812
mentalhealth,EliEliboi,2020/02/20,"Heya, can anyone help me find articles for a school argumentative essay? Hey, I'm in school and all,  and we have to make an argumentative essay on a topic. I chose to make my essay surrounded around how mental health and suicide, and how it's a serious issue. 

It being an argumentative essay, I'll need opposite points to argue about. I'm here to ask if anyone can link any articles that talk about mental health being a hoax or ""just in your head. "" that way I'll have sources to work with and argue against. Thanks again!",5.0439886845827475,6.191943554455444,6.159915134370582,76.59792079207921,68.90099009900989,8.939745403111743,25.319660537482317,9.23628265651192,1.9573581329561531,413,11,78,8,7,138,63,101,0.191,0.7559999999999999,0.052000000000000005,-0.9168,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,1,1,0,1,8,4,2,0,6,0,6,3,1,4,1,19,13,9,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,14,11,1,8,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,2,1,48,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302313182507414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678122762139906,0.0,0.0,0.17048182031659015,0.17903318135198398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17503391672523896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19654141848392284,0.4071259439347076,0.0,0.0,0.12836309662788034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998835394065216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556648018685816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38598800005158906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14200000432389726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810360032940676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3876305899363102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20947756099468845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539260620378084,0.0,0.17631390390364335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200933240650105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394193674121055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,badbitchinpain,2020/02/20,"i’m fooling myself i want to run away. cut my hair, dye it, change myself completely, looks wise. i don’t want anyone to recognise me. change my name, who i am, maybe that way i can erase all the mistakes i have made. i fool myself with the idea that i can just do that and not kill myself but the way i’m going i don’t think i can and one way or another i’m messing  up my family so what’s the point.",-0.6802247191011226,1.223030921348318,1.8023483146067427,97.99251123595506,88.1011235955056,4.908314606741573,15.641573033707864,6.2581,-0.652650337078652,308,6,76,3,10,105,55,89,0.08900000000000001,0.825,0.086,-0.0623,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,2,0,4,0,8,1,1,1,1,15,17,5,1,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,6,0,1,1,2,17,1,5,16,1,8,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,0,49,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21773830707277092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451931591305015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19509327277617874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4393306720845141,0.0,0.21771625111255705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19575319948425934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801183409570234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344106884529243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297330904766516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17437304271007975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964827078696977,0.0,0.0,0.2086115463008244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070848200823402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19629562622157645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305323238883007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449537738865677,0.4944668444948325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MarioAdNoman,2020/02/20,"Writing messes with my mood? Long story short, I have a ""book"" I have been writing on and off since 2012 on wattpad and in real life notepads. I dropped it for a couple years then picked it up after I got into a relationship with a girl who actually showed interest in it, so I moved it over to wattpad and wrote a lot more . We broke up in 2016 and ever since, whenever I write. As little as a chapter or just proofreading to fix the grammar of the old chapters: I get overwhelmed by a sad, gloomy and defeat feeling. It can be as bad as ending the day right there and going to sleep no matter the time or to even have a sleep paralysis episode. Which in and out of itself does give me great ideas to write stuff but I can't without it happening again obviouslly.   
I told this to a friend last night and he said I should drop writing but, it is something I have been writing for almost a decade! I know I don't have readers but I wanted to finish it to be able to say I finished a big project   
Should I listen to my friend?",4.01792207792208,4.667613119617228,4.798650034176352,87.24805023923443,70.91387559808612,7.502529049897473,27.84723171565277,7.447530270364453,1.3618226930963773,798,27,171,8,14,258,127,209,0.07,0.8420000000000001,0.087,0.65,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,0,1,6,11,0,1,15,0,15,3,2,1,1,39,27,19,0,3,7,0,1,0,2,2,1,3,0,1,13,13,0,0,3,2,0,2,4,6,0,0,6,4,20,4,35,17,2,34,0,4,0,0,19,16,0,4,14,121,33,2,0.1589885932174957,0.0,0.15514993259998291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15920411025261358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13274883437863366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591785438378602,0.0,0.10253448982713426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13913198932985346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408167032761085,0.0,0.0,0.10501046636302168,0.1438142848339659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038940980348573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456683854631592,0.0,0.08306497794394943,0.15251634581180915,0.09035688141907128,0.0,0.12715770188042674,0.17528548530132929,0.0,0.0,0.14059308791433905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17947876958447406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873759729214178,0.12959692339712334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229834524081518,0.0,0.15934833820602592,0.0,0.14069990191822515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516641646761826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689797134697545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14920002455194595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683178382169958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18096382611421893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17069424929556984,0.0,0.13577538990882668,0.15123456017134426,0.12643411066142313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630340145046036,0.0,0.3182068257562116,0.0,0.0,0.12239718653871486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18200390154636853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270752725752,0.0,0.0,0.1519204141257975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377559153208953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15325933034048625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238344138628218
mentalhealth,bulabu1,2020/02/20,some small and simple habits that i personally use for my mental health i seriously believe that habits shape our lives and recommend everyone to acquire some habits for your mental health - find more in this [article](https://corespirit.com/articles/fd19ee-the-best-habits-for-overcoming-mental-health-challenges-in-2020),17.161875000000002,16.163051437500005,12.453333333333333,48.52500000000003,45.04166666666666,15.433333333333335,46.91666666666667,13.816669648895859,6.683841666666668,271,11,33,7,2,76,35,48,0.046,0.887,0.067,0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,6,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,4,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,0,17,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22217111430836914,0.2069438719341436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842816875851576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802325577023597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6288268430071579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741267013521717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5961782075720857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721829724829642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17031307169794385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kavaalt,2020/02/20,"I think I might have schizophrenia I know this is prolly the shittiest post y’all could have seen but I’m getting worried. 

To start, I’m sixteen, male and have a history of frequent weed use, meaning I have some decent points towards schizophrenia. I am very irritable, my memories are distorted, I keep hearing my name from voices I shouldn’t be able to hear (old family friends, dead people I knew, etc).

To explain the distorted memories, my family has pointed out several (I’m not exaggerating when I say tens to hundreds) holes in my memory, where I don’t remember entire conversations or in a few instances, the full day. 

Time also feels distorted for me, to the point that I didn’t even notice I had been working for six months (I thought it had been one month).

I’ve always had a rather...antisocial personality but it’s been worse recently. I was shocked to discover that people DONT try to actively manipulate the other side of a conversation, and it is in fact NOT normal to enjoy seeing others in distress.

Idk maybe I’m making something of nothing but all these things can’t be coincidences right??",5.652463768115942,7.250493763285025,6.665429951690825,71.85408695652175,67.8888888888889,10.157681159420287,33.12367149758454,10.355215969177356,3.7809590338164254,887,40,152,24,15,296,137,207,0.215,0.758,0.027999999999999997,-0.9914,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,0,1,4,4,0,1,9,0,25,0,0,3,2,29,45,8,1,3,6,0,1,0,1,2,0,4,0,2,10,3,0,1,8,0,0,0,7,2,0,3,11,7,20,2,20,29,5,23,0,0,2,0,11,13,0,3,9,104,30,1,0.13745871919560335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992568807825663,0.1143766659591488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974960215990928,0.0,0.0,0.08864950220505201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611005951581259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330280747453295,0.09079018762463972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591676938897832,0.0,0.06950325859768425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620026546942726,0.0,0.0718165073802908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098519334577151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12217962546769102,0.0,0.0,0.07554371721383421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175476244751272,0.0,0.1380957591395941,0.14973284260838776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582197864526464,0.0,0.0,0.21943647645850706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13468035956216373,0.13189534835033925,0.15649766287445094,0.1442398027503588,0.0,0.09314558558655488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19059313644677334,0.12002365157163683,0.0,0.0,0.3898287606731117,0.0,0.13164745588986698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357239020622128,0.0,0.15571393287275265,0.11738899513136372,0.0,0.10931269069334658,0.0,0.0,0.10953680235852728,0.0,0.0,0.15528922662217762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582243766218603,0.0,0.0,0.09729398894279302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132146512088453,0.08807799692072801,0.0,0.10912686875337807,0.08015328457669409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332544730651124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11872019910442486,0.0,0.11341783917802505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007158469984352,0.13959600174814898,0.14008217828723873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JuanCFonsek,2020/02/20,"Mental Health Survey This is a short survey that will be part of a research about human behavior and mental health. 

Your information is private and will help us in the development of a responsive app.   
[https://forms.gle/MusVvxtmc81HmMDH8](https://forms.gle/MusVvxtmc81HmMDH8)",13.109864864864864,18.34557072972973,10.97966216216216,32.819222972972995,57.91891891891893,9.105405405405406,28.16891891891892,9.516144504307137,3.530789189189189,235,7,25,5,4,72,28,37,0.0,0.86,0.14,0.6369,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,3,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,20,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6228279587157497,0.0,0.0,0.1963719744178152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5904907848355164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172585402182521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3524074817425717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OneArmdHerdazian,2020/02/20,"I am actively starting to break down.. Hard I am starting to panic way worse than I normally do.  Most of my recent anxiety I cant identify the triggers.  I don't even know how to communicate what I feel.. Because in my head it sounds insane.  I feel broken and confused but like I'm in a dream at the same time? This last month I feel like I don't exist? Like. Not the alone way. But like my reality is fake?  I feel so out of control of even my own body. Its like a movie? Im not even sure and its a new feeling. I moved to a new state in the US last week so on top of this, im in a new and unfamiliar environment and now I'm crying and alone and i don't know what to do. Dont have a therapist yet and I really, really, want to avoid being hopsitalized 
Help
Help help help",-0.6048214285714266,1.4313748273809532,2.5062380952380963,92.05542857142858,89.41666666666666,6.217142857142857,18.51904761904762,7.554174236665415,0.4601347619047624,593,17,142,12,20,211,87,168,0.156,0.61,0.233,0.946,0,3,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,2,8,10,0,3,10,0,12,2,2,3,1,29,24,12,0,2,4,0,6,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,2,7,1,0,1,7,4,0,0,0,7,18,6,19,23,3,27,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,2,18,88,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469032051503202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09118497878267448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266106614330481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13240041521755533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336889846323339,0.0,0.0,0.13093173313979067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13969738351838193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23618444701317565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3013466015618326,0.08515398710937927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677663097338767,0.0,0.12232997376457792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.319579544382154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575052991312615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310145331948252,0.19432207567668391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29116688950190994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514149087921674,0.12668699151164753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34536210124348304,0.0,0.0,0.11678723982169074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985138364746788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15272063095524566,0.0,0.11769214123874636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687357600887051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234126910372368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839629706618803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950442439258522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337868576466287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703051705112044,0.18922523088210416,0.09561222416796844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147139347980045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Unique-Memory,2020/02/20,"How do I better these tendencies? I realize that I am an escapist at my core. I am an adult, but a young adult in college that can’t get into bars. I do different activities like travel to different places when I don’t like how I feel(I usually blame it on the environment, but I really just think it’s me). I have sex to forget how I feel not really cause I enjoy it, smoke marijuana, drink alcohol, shop, overindulge, write screenplays and books of how I wish my life was like and just a lot of things to try to not deal with the way I’m feeling. I don’t want to keep doing this, but it’s so engraved deep into my core because I’ve been an escapist since childhood and now it’s affecting me directly. I want to be happy.",3.9116778523489932,4.549013892617452,5.584758389261747,81.56116442953022,71.14765100671141,9.449932885906039,28.322818791946307,9.642632912329526,2.411917583892617,566,20,120,13,10,194,90,149,0.063,0.768,0.17,0.9293,2,0,3,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,0,7,0,12,5,0,6,0,30,21,12,0,3,7,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,10,6,3,1,4,5,1,1,5,0,0,0,2,2,19,6,14,18,1,14,0,0,0,1,4,7,0,1,8,80,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20607409537569704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11754593436086774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705403700322164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980870942985135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19879682097568768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029276671587773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888976685594421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924983328254258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007444787573353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20526859927685032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17139405871312285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619985867246354,0.2826175218564682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639351566639284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20146383357938866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24706063666077566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950900934806006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810611012092404,0.12355616018447756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309173042056054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212372393542104,0.0,0.22746946602299814,0.15305759844495045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22174225981543708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mmmmmel_,2020/02/20,"I don’t look after myself I honestly don’t look after myself, I know it’s not good and I need to change that. I struggle with this a lot , I’m not sure why. I know I don’t love myself, I feel weird saying I love myself, every thought I have about myself is negative. I find myself switching from saying “you need to stop this negativity” but as soon as I say that in my head this other voice is stronger and always takes over, it says “no you don’t deserve to be looked after, what ever happens, happens just don’t care about your self and you will become numb. I seem to like not caring about myself. I don’t care if myself died tomorrow tbh. I’d only care about the fact that those who love me such as my boyfriend and brothers would not cope well for abit. I feel shit saying that actually but yeah I just I think I hate myself, I don’t like anything about me.",1.9249231843575425,3.7271454134078255,3.341840083798882,91.02940817039108,78.10614525139665,5.5923184357541915,19.567388268156424,6.322622252153567,-0.0259583798882681,675,15,145,5,16,221,97,179,0.193,0.615,0.191,0.5597,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,4,0,0,11,18,2,1,2,1,13,6,2,0,3,30,37,10,1,4,9,1,2,2,0,2,1,6,0,1,13,5,0,1,8,0,0,0,14,5,1,0,1,11,36,13,20,33,1,9,0,0,3,3,15,2,1,3,9,105,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.11182719708527282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535137383807843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943010840178122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656005109720248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4673448120710648,0.0,0.1212252394570301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189304623590762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365681830665027,0.0965503731255812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11588432199762555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473682447132686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611599611559757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20267016153412895,0.0,0.0,0.1131378338056536,0.11760648698394782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12595571239586764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119696635144001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28869025361353273,0.0,0.0,0.09742370647756296,0.3102766312769921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993997284704682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715388791938514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4556486739729887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432205832834754,0.11954651635010805,0.0,0.11762907685077892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580570101662657,0.0,0.11979851211500385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800347286948384,0.0,0.0861604138635801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734271972422858,0.0,0.0909748222771129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303375295459023,0.0,0.10340324575732328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140427770346505,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,curiouslygeorgie,2020/02/20,"Food for thought. Be kind x When people are feeling anxious, sad, lonely, etc. it can often feel as if they are trapped in a dark tunnel with no idea of how to get to the end. Sometimes it can feel so dark that they don’t want to find their way out because the thought of facing that tunnel is terrifying, and it seems pointless even trying because they know they’ll just be wandering around aimlessly in the dark.

Now think of every kind word, every smile, every hug.. as a candle. That one flame may not be enough to get them through that tunnel, but it makes it a little less dark than before. Every positive gesture, no matter how big or small, makes that journey through the tunnel seem a bit more bearable, and the more candles that are lit, the brighter the tunnel becomes. 

Unfortunately it also works the other way around, and these days it seems far too ‘normal’ for people to blow each others candles out. I’m sure we have all been guilty of it, and it may not always be intentional, but every cruel word, every snigger, every rumour etc. can make someone’s tunnel even darker. We all really need to remember that actions have consequences and words can have a tragic impact. There is no way of knowing how many candles anybody has lit, and just one nasty comment could leave somebody feeling alone in the dark. 

Remember that you never truly know what someone is going through, you never know how dark their tunnel is and it costs absolutely nothing to be nice. It can be so simple to ignite a little flame inside of someone to try and ease some of their pain, and if you can’t manage that, at least make a conscious effort not to blow any candles out. 
If everybody stopped contributing to the darkness, it would make it a bit easier to reach the light at the end of the tunnel. 

So ‘In a world where you can be anything, be kind.’",9.047271428571428,7.239616491428574,8.314964285714286,74.41016071428572,61.228571428571435,10.35,35.589285714285715,8.472884824447931,2.878071428571429,1452,48,263,14,16,456,177,350,0.147,0.774,0.079,-0.9806,0,4,0,0,0,0,40.0,2,4,8,2,20,10,1,0,22,0,33,4,1,11,5,78,58,26,0,8,11,0,4,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,26,18,1,1,19,0,1,3,10,5,0,2,3,7,14,5,40,42,13,32,0,3,2,1,16,18,0,11,8,188,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528218672030748,0.0,0.06584941414368754,0.06851570890105675,0.0,0.0,0.055995848344476414,0.0,0.0,0.09302379429835356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776101236454639,0.14660489172900945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039067101388574,0.09094102444925553,0.07006755872510613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17979376735030336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574393238810486,0.0,0.0,0.05310421873526462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586235373015696,0.08508200351089235,0.18366771653217048,0.1087731315508689,0.0,0.4856408350671579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653973933650562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525972083931043,0.0,0.0995690995845987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604130698679474,0.0,0.0467972445486818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295486674209606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25724170049798817,0.18101354133807224,0.0,0.0,0.08718901234697406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650580018774202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748219027640112,0.08348255674488125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06105605636062642,0.12701550736512607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067834669832633,0.0790100254907148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159506659769676,0.0,0.08761842069957099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11417209748001032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05275083147356841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18655641702930456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248850591032502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093060652291618,0.0,0.08143901935272484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06884217036100496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760700459329495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0527618666535022,0.0,0.13074178566213426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118105537889631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04856784807867702,0.19607936797486286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059946454192071036,0.0,0.0,0.058493879741080786,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snzcc,2020/02/20,"How to cope with negation of mental illnesses with stubborn people around you that believe and want to make you believe you're just imagining things? So, well, I've been in depression and anxiety treatment for almost three years now. It's been very long because I did quit the first try and the second was with a different doc. 

I used to be very skeptical about what my issue was. Indeed I did avoided drugs and put all my efforts on psychology and self care. It didn't work. I waited perhaps 5 years to visit my first psychiatrist. 
I've been thru maybe 5-6 antidepressants, several hypnotics, antipsychotics and anxiolytics. Failed a suicide attempt last year and really had a very awful depression and anxiety time. Every night very vivid nightmares, mania by days and feeling constantly like about to crash myself. 

Anyhow, as my question says, I'm just tired of people trying to persuade me everything is psychological alone. It's fine I think if they think I'm a ""weak"" mind or as many have told me ""you haven't tried hard enough"". I don't have to convince no one about what's my problem and why I chose this solution but it's getting really tedious to keep my comments for me and not explode to people with this type of unsolicited comments/opinions. 

I'm finally in the last part of my treatment. Might be out in maybe three or two more months. Feeling better but just worried how to react to this issue with people since well, I see them very often and most of the time they will try to start talking about that again. Thanks for your time replying.",6.384621485219897,7.404318356164389,6.3256020187454975,77.08399783705843,65.78082191780823,9.298053352559482,32.1492429704398,9.414487439383343,2.9315178082191777,1248,49,220,23,19,394,170,292,0.11900000000000001,0.794,0.087,-0.6469,1,2,1,0,0,1,31.0,0,4,3,8,16,16,2,1,8,1,18,4,0,5,1,52,36,22,1,3,9,0,3,1,0,2,4,1,0,1,12,19,0,4,6,0,0,2,6,8,2,7,10,6,26,8,39,22,5,27,0,3,2,0,14,6,0,9,20,146,38,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411370124541744,0.0973414600377363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14379852157547462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366773155324046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05729317496694026,0.0,0.0,0.21178074636839334,0.0,0.0831232429459109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582529476209624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156579899217548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06061338697619328,0.0,0.16190052165246194,0.0,0.0,0.09819567754116272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899426711065666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711297004904246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918750973739136,0.0,0.08446882445262653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950445925740976,0.0,0.0,0.1029573955446375,0.0,0.15988939428641455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04910396161110235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419326229914399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961945536001408,0.0,0.08353934015274678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322275425639506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045916957815928784,0.0,0.0,0.08317491623413657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273658379124919,0.09528735453138733,0.18884373809878824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471608266240987,0.09970460974292883,0.09489936858995793,0.0,0.0750189664545788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819977395188056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06368754797091497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177800193456993,0.0,0.2606330604707292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993219414619084,0.0,0.09448218877108693,0.10528616363661056,0.09996599702179128,0.0,0.0,0.1204200584274889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474167657567672,0.0,0.0,0.0748949111314225,0.0,0.09804820655879168,0.10617776470658416,0.0,0.07774643700840839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652398553356913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280575551800104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554262626777881,0.0,0.08652995582472862,0.0,0.0,0.06244032021524044,0.12044524963254225,0.0,0.0,0.16441249870379646,0.10802342371252394,0.0,0.08980793552018661,0.0,0.2552421079243705,0.0,0.09181095649157643,0.0,0.0,0.08117398508975639,0.0,0.3877426948320479,0.05543555371503661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16900993856873764,0.0,0.08480801539353572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842314438159182,0.09544764791479796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815722835261676
mentalhealth,hiphopnoumenonist,2020/02/20,Why exactly is god belief not a delusion due to others sharing the same belief? Does that mean that what we consider to be delusions is subject to change with common non-belief in god in the future?,7.777631578947368,7.244505184210527,7.967368421052632,71.78157894736844,62.94736842105264,9.705263157894738,34.78947368421053,8.841846274778883,3.130747368421053,159,6,26,2,2,52,29,38,0.0,0.818,0.182,0.7476,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,1,8,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,6,3,1,5,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5366581132442869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4439432855900407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5526004576992272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.457761032438549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tapiraat69,2020/02/20,I haven't eaten for more than 2 days and I feel good about it. My eating disorder like habits have returned and they're big this time. I crave to losing weight. I know that it's bad but my body just doesn't allow me to eat anymore.,-0.11893333333333088,2.051380040000001,1.3480000000000023,100.24066666666668,88.6,4.133333333333334,14.333333333333336,5.46131890053228,-1.1286666666666667,182,3,43,1,6,58,41,50,0.17,0.7509999999999999,0.079,-0.4937,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,1,0,7,6,3,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,7,2,5,5,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,24,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708551681290943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280383341614432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30336748905307204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17613558991849432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130116907435088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5589265122579572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380943733450894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22907461549966102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009601706862508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13342944282832686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3055441060666383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15925465695414148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33257862148746475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RuDarkBlue,2020/02/20,"How to fall out of love with the man I created. (Please help me)  

Hi.. I need some help before this problem gets out of control, but this is very personal and maybe even a trigger for some people.

I don't remember much about my life growing up, but there are memories I don't think will ever leave me. I was molested by my own uncle when I was only 4, and I was raped at my ex-best friends house when I was 7 years old. I was in court for what felt like my entire childhood. Other sexual attempts were made that I remember bits and pieces of.. I just remember trying to survive through all of this and feeling so tired. I missed out on so much school from that and defending myself from bullies...I felt like the whole world was leaving me behind. I was depressed and suicidal by 10, but I never told anyone.

What saved me, is what I hate and love the most. Somewhere along the line, I created a man that I can't get over... when I think he's gone out of my head, he comes back, no matter what I do, no matter how happy I think I am, no matter how much I think I don't need him anymore, he comes back, for long periods of time until he disappears from me again. I've gone to lengths searching for anyone that could even remotely be him, and end up in a world of pain when I realize I will never find him in real life. So now... what once saved me is killing me. I have dreams, fantasies, a specific look. Black hair, blue eyes, a name, a voice, a style to match. I've fallen in love with someone who isn't real. A part of me doesn't want it to stop, but I know that I need it to.

I'm 23 years old now, and I've been in recovery for suicidal ideation for awhile. I've gone to professional help and have been diagnosed with many things, but I was told that this part of my situation is normal, that it's just a phase. But it is a phase that is hurting me deeply, almost to a point where it's dangerous.

I need advice, on how to get him to go away.",3.709564228874573,3.941137167487685,4.857635467980298,88.04843880257675,71.41379310344827,8.413641530882911,26.20651762031073,8.384062270229773,1.4035524062144749,1494,43,342,22,26,494,191,406,0.18100000000000002,0.6859999999999999,0.133,-0.9826,0,0,0,0,0,0,61.0,0,0,0,3,24,19,5,0,15,0,32,12,3,7,4,73,64,28,3,8,8,0,4,2,1,2,5,1,0,3,25,20,0,2,13,2,0,10,11,10,0,0,19,9,50,9,54,41,13,53,0,3,4,4,23,20,0,4,25,232,75,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415502859598505,0.0,0.0,0.08623629045385106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540745364837254,0.12043358497575755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091215311311692,0.13244123786133585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328139495644888,0.0,0.0903771556945454,0.0,0.09402024500094716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483687354023101,0.0,0.0,0.09659039941976706,0.06875945391824391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417464314491369,0.08740953153437422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627636061156844,0.0,0.0,0.11376230253863352,0.0779000643807257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04354463262429024,0.0,0.16537654875372562,0.0,0.07871170949133477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653575152838066,0.0,0.13498173294303295,0.0,0.04894372549926858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167586350122386,0.0,0.08502522729651271,0.08838350488954512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17317235928123909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993703993032408,0.09219276058802348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527852358662174,0.0,0.047329053047583065,0.0,0.0,0.18237633980451276,0.0,0.0,0.12165757155776448,0.08414732517311269,0.0,0.0,0.07621309267327306,0.07231873313614723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331787715189949,0.08148840150665594,0.0,0.08731170778758328,0.08651866430484817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899233372383657,0.255426223607992,0.1328414137751657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437887513718867,0.0,0.0,0.18073596396165895,0.09171451125212067,0.0,0.06549779928480667,0.09163727421895893,0.0,0.0,0.18651816304099625,0.0,0.05970445324963864,0.07519627020893199,0.0,0.09453340585972553,0.08141081206063333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824047796751662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19604580617502984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29266999007957256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715758338687178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680198367112444,0.0,0.0,0.072968816153633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199980087327212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840162220502665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05721400305011519,0.22072772388397086,0.0,0.0,0.05021700278436475,0.09898175525793836,0.0,0.16458184324052694,0.0,0.0584695221411531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105764880227478,0.05079554250208318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614940326387827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091633469817808
mentalhealth,RicardoBorriquero,2020/02/20,"I always feel uncomfortable with my clothes, seats or bedding and it is getting worse. Hi, Reddit. This might be just a tiny problem compared to what others share on this subreddit but I would still like to ask for help.

Since I was a child, it is difficult for me to sit still. I am constantly adjusting my clothes, which always feel wrinkled, so I am constantly moving and adjusting my posture and position.

This guy in the first 30 seconds of this video here seems to have the same problem as me, although admittedly more severe:

[https://youtu.be/zsi\_6zoS0ZE](https://youtu.be/zsi_6zoS0ZE)

Also, his problem might be drugs-related, but I take no drugs, even no alcohol. As I am growing older (I am 32) I am noticing that it is getting more serious. It is specially annoying when I ride a plane, go to the movies or just share my bed with someone, because people usually think I am being obnoxious with me just not sitting still. When I notice that others noticed, I get more self-conscious and I do it even more. It is also more serious when I am wearing formal clothes like a suit or something tighter. If I am at home in my pajamas I can sort of manage it.

I have never been able to sleep cuddling with a woman, because as soon as they place their head on my chest/shoulders I get incredibly uncomfortable and I feel the urge to move and adjust my position.

​

Does this ""condition"" have a name? Does anyone have the same problem or am I alone?  


Thanks!",5.675817843866169,7.442322260223051,5.7543847583643135,77.76243215613384,68.03345724907065,8.800074349442381,32.78085501858736,9.255337874911486,3.0799738289962817,1164,52,202,23,20,367,144,269,0.165,0.763,0.07200000000000001,-0.9766,0,1,4,0,0,0,55.0,0,0,2,1,16,14,1,0,11,0,28,6,3,0,1,42,42,24,0,6,11,0,3,2,0,3,2,0,3,3,18,10,1,0,9,1,0,5,4,8,0,2,2,3,34,6,24,34,7,26,0,0,0,1,13,6,0,9,15,158,52,1,0.1039677165299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110987036884662,0.0,0.10767919930222816,0.0,0.1662858906929193,0.17301893766599558,0.11264897742289352,0.12633215541748735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269664476752208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09719578034537182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675551000634153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22470433272171486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18196569872278692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056954360925795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733939245022286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15770760407360535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843488656840033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21727536311047965,0.0,0.05908724924090983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294438514570883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670087184662247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968736884458505,0.0,0.10428809668894448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158674936859677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22058663471243695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22100245802280447,0.0,0.0,0.08018631239427562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3551038030880297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207812388548898,0.0,0.10862413537328404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3979322542891893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946483043744704,0.1084610028571304,0.11745392644483744,0.0,0.08600316948627124,0.0,0.10404280077138416,0.0,0.08809150882779186,0.08003942758777774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490862581640577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781707838885165,0.0,0.0,0.09571950487748848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661831471996248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450575130933065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595198535448293,0.07385568284332679,0.0,0.12633215541748735,0.0
mentalhealth,XenonDown,2020/02/20,"Anyone want to talk (voice) about social anxiety [https://ykyz.com/p/e6ef9a06598f26d69492a6dc8adcb4f9797280f1/](https://ykyz.com/p/e6ef9a06598f26d69492a6dc8adcb4f9797280f1/) 

Let me know if you need help, not my site - just started the topic.",27.52913043478261,35.567630826086955,8.903695652173916,51.71032608695657,23.34782608695652,8.078260869565218,24.54347826086957,8.841846274778883,2.0051913043478256,211,3,17,2,2,39,23,23,0.066,0.778,0.156,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,5,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134885271295033,0.0,0.0,0.28653496917772525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746738607787961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252100817048659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4190384384916261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038543821618824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41772969705080265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900517476149043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293739933445813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24170498965267864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zopstrosity,2020/02/20,"I feel frozen I've been trying my hardest to try to make an effort towards my future but, I just feel stuck, like I can't go any further. I've been trying to learn to animate characters and move toward my goals every night but either, I do something on my own and it doesn't turn out how I want it too, or I imitate something I've seen before and it turns out great and I end up hating it the next day. I'm not sure what to do. I wanted to start by getting a new drawing pad as most of my drawings have been scribbled over or ripped out but I never have enough money (or maybe that's what I tell myself to justify it). The current drawing pad I'm using is filled with sketches and characters for a game my crew gave up on last year and I can't seem to move past it and I can never get my mind off of it. At the time I thought of it the local game store I worked at had closed and I consequently poured all my time into this game only for them to drop it within a few months and for whatever reason I've just been stuck in that same frame of mind... it feels like my brain is stuck but I keep aging and before I know it'll be too late...",2.3478455284552844,3.1873955731707326,3.890406504065041,91.51211382113821,74.97560975609754,6.6048780487804875,21.796747967479682,6.691623216298621,0.2901479674796752,885,20,205,7,18,295,136,246,0.07200000000000001,0.87,0.057999999999999996,-0.3491,2,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,3,5,5,1,0,8,0,17,1,1,4,4,49,42,19,0,2,11,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,16,16,0,1,8,3,2,4,6,1,0,0,11,4,28,4,35,29,7,42,0,0,1,0,6,19,0,5,20,135,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099654265421732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22772779713890826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493781081941384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629747469017612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185174462506384,0.13826325326757716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274212609212265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20297764399775528,0.09559510317407983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982217776366265,0.0,0.07604827117676882,0.0,0.0,0.14752786849429125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132111347805108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893798469465505,0.0,0.0,0.07353940927026614,0.10907439277889004,0.1509454228018626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307472722659874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932034690620186,0.0,0.1344318352922531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702233373700815,0.0,0.10680722001956294,0.2844413147399364,0.0,0.0,0.20640766012857206,0.12923617093184567,0.14231025796962515,0.1255732131134852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017698254614269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773840602982756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13758071096721575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181714346092053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060295638137223,0.0,0.0,0.09471260796113606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261159409586196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695732129017265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623154061801528,0.1560533533756843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725480761839196,0.2910974029856817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557034300913326,0.0,0.0,0.15785121183009396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741650920797178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08617034576971824
mentalhealth,JF_92X,2020/02/20,"ECT Experiences? About to undergo ECT now that all the preliminary medical stuff is out of the way, wanted some feedback from others that may have undergone this therapy. I am going straight in for bilateral/bitemporal for a number of reasons. I know I am going to lose a few weeks to retrograde and that after weeks or months of this I am going to have anterograde for awhile. What else am I looking at, cognitive wise? I am horrified at the idea of losing my self to this. Had a bad experience with an injected neuroleptic a year or so ago and its left me a bit worried about how drastic ""nuclear option"" stuff like ECT or ketamine treatment will effect me long term. Suppose I am just looking for some stories so I know what to expect. Its happening either way.",5.002121212121214,6.7650941111111145,6.232121212121212,73.69772727272729,69.69444444444444,9.95858585858586,32.535353535353536,10.230975488527342,3.735744444444443,608,28,105,17,11,204,91,144,0.10300000000000001,0.836,0.061,-0.7941,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,7,5,0,0,9,0,12,1,0,3,1,22,21,8,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,13,4,0,0,5,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,2,11,2,23,18,7,20,0,2,2,0,1,6,0,7,10,83,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13905760388221752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098160606828882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17126364500030333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104646525984712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069019252346113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674619970033449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13872143242023244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17708944568419138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724255481201976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704419372511113,0.0,0.0,0.07663975788420824,0.0,0.0,0.13882682445508587,0.26346601922971,0.35099938687479315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580320828197174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521377066944878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16129059054653186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365175675989274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3591619232940708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793968564202947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252719729231673,0.2490354570397115,0.2516665862502088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15931117771634332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102045453238412
mentalhealth,scrubmypuppy,2020/02/20,"I need advice , I think I might be hallucinating I used to have random headaches quite frequently for years (I used to think this was normal) when I went to the Doctors they just told me I wasn’t sleeping enough (which was true , I have problems sleeping) 

My headaches became very bad mid of last year to the point where I couldn’t walk properly at times 


I finally went for therapy and got meds around November last year 

Which lessened the headaches 

However since January it’s been coming back some days it can be quite intense , my meds dosage has increased since then , but today I swore I saw something ran past my apartment door.

I came home ,placed my things down turned back to face the door and this dark figure ran past my door


I looked out hoping I mistakenly saw my neighbour as a shadowy figure but there was nothing there 


I’ve been having a bad headache throughout the day and felt feverish (I took my temperature it’s normal) 

I’m kind of scared right now , should I call someone to tell them about what I saw? 


I have seen this “shadowy figure” once in my life before when I was around 12 

I exited the elevator at my apartment building and was walking along the corridor to my apartment door when suddenly I saw this black shadowy figure running down the stairs which frightened me causing me to run in a panic to my apartment entrance 



I sometimes fear that someone or something is hiding in my house (it’s irrational but sometimes I get scared to the point of locking myself in my room) I used to check every single room and closet/under the beds whenever I enter my house (I live with my parents and siblings but most of the time I’m home alone)




Can someone please advice me",6.3668944099378875,7.013025968944099,5.933720496894412,81.19660559006212,65.70807453416147,8.427577639751552,32.55962732919255,8.238735603445708,2.3845597515527954,1350,53,249,16,20,416,170,322,0.12300000000000001,0.8420000000000001,0.036000000000000004,-0.9847,2,1,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,2,13,10,0,4,14,0,21,5,3,4,1,42,48,16,0,7,6,1,1,0,1,2,2,0,9,0,14,13,0,0,7,0,1,13,2,7,0,0,22,8,49,3,32,21,5,60,0,0,7,0,7,25,0,6,22,156,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17727050884955695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394236577777124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16149222825143222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949211366238146,0.15146870991429515,0.0,0.0,0.07718273280792884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926192966830688,0.1037416281428854,0.0,0.09317836717628028,0.0,0.07813377780548814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699362159021845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283975970944976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372185449628737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07642233845575097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206762646514887,0.0,0.0,0.08709041348586494,0.09936219682786196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04738928634334762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254456564401594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819677447251908,0.09008989934920354,0.0,0.20932131499399872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944546368193421,0.0,0.1478723251146188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406717452079626,0.0,0.0,0.08009361491903623,0.0,0.07616882102165766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20150420044849296,0.0,0.0,0.09622299598309964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725613636513827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17774203611210335,0.08703328327054183,0.0,0.0,0.09659718705940476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064220274430148,0.10071646173973887,0.0,0.17317515710911727,0.0,0.0,0.09476675461608897,0.09956615332214823,0.17148988385624106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679182615921106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19295051160975168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774610309908322,0.0,0.0,0.18162178311526544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15006317391440274,0.0,0.18153973859289094,0.0,0.23056053902264526,0.1396573011652932,0.1794178699874943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927961182151325,0.0,0.10372834484292054,0.0,0.060259948830306165,0.11623938754143205,0.0,0.0,0.1057808877853398,0.0,0.08597713099502532,0.08667190655567718,0.10077588550568643,0.0,0.09866030128074846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350183425228573,0.0,0.07484059937348367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816770773708348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752319090704806
mentalhealth,manman6352,2020/02/20,"Anyone not depressed anymore necessarily, but wish they'd have killed themselves when they could have? I almost killed myself, i didn't, worked through it , now 6 months later i think about suicide, but fleetingly, I'm not looking for opportunities at every turn anymore.

I don't think I'm depressed anymore, but i still wished i completed suicide. I don't have alot of hope for myself and feel like it would have saved me alot of trouble.

Idk what that means, or what it makes me, but yeah, anyone else?",5.3769452887538005,7.079082074468088,5.087568389057751,82.50500000000002,68.68085106382978,7.073556231003039,29.386018237082077,7.447530270364453,1.7238741641337385,401,15,73,4,7,123,59,94,0.273,0.542,0.185,-0.9406,0,0,0,0,0,2,15.0,0,0,2,2,4,9,2,0,2,1,10,0,0,1,0,22,22,7,4,5,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,2,13,4,7,18,2,6,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,5,6,48,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15198806850031202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4515818287369194,0.2122594544210959,0.15551892357414052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914087466828045,0.0,0.0,0.12118583182520705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614597794956959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679465202053827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788315085973515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674570150560081,0.10843331968632236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15075409130647416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3358492971643209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415317469721905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745892138802775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131587716304202,0.0,0.0,0.16533544291679167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115119968120812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121355676219535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3320504454744754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19451196382077654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16509557869467964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34908435446973496,0.0,0.0,0.11049933662854952,0.0,0.0,0.10782180523155102,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SaltyIceCubes,2020/02/20,Feeling Helpless Everytime I get upset or show emotions my boyfriend immediately asks me if I have taken my medication that day and tells me that he's going to take me to the hospital which then makes me more upset and he then will leave the house and tell me he can't do this anymore. I don't know what to do anymore.,7.881025641025642,5.900737000000002,8.290769230769232,74.21256410256413,63.615384615384606,11.12820512820513,37.05128205128205,9.725611199111238,3.3178205128205125,255,10,52,4,3,85,44,65,0.145,0.8320000000000001,0.023,-0.7845,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,2,0,6,1,0,1,0,8,14,7,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,1,10,0,3,12,1,4,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,2,3,34,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5091309936737051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399686060628586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16554250844821625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887394223382677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978915264489785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410887240205682,0.0,0.14588169142782131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29618345927572265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106899795279534,0.0,0.0,0.2717955024438731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17134121636123334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585861296172884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19299741180031071,0.0,0.4487132078260732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lazobeam,2020/02/20,I wanna hurt myself Hey Reddit I’ve never really done this and it’s been awhile since I felt like harming myself. I don’t want to commit suicide but I do want to hurt myself. It’s sorta hard for me to open up and talk about this topic. I’m currently waiting to chat with someone but there’s a wait. I don’t know how to approach this. Someone help? Or throw suggestions or if I can vent out to someone thanks...,-0.43242397137746025,1.8103266162790703,1.8086046511627918,93.87852415026836,96.7906976744186,4.0415026833631496,17.08050089445438,5.8734145424116955,-0.2841402504472277,323,9,67,3,13,108,57,86,0.154,0.7340000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.6716,1,0,0,0,0,6,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,1,2,21,14,8,1,4,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,2,2,1,0,2,3,3,0,0,3,2,10,2,12,11,0,7,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,4,3,44,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22559029576202044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21166038543291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19747412805482895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775866988806333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4719787754004738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211500141431074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769758719425568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17001966151183706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122178775891014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823531888223463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5603433328867253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411294725438093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17718418132080282,0.0,0.2029548102839684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26004664350023154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,0MoodIndigo0,2020/02/20,"First time I have felt suicidal in a while. Hi to anyone reading this. Just received some news that has really unsettled me and for the first time in quite a while the thought of suicide crept into my head as a good solution. I hadn't been doing amazing but I'd been managing to keep myself fairly level-headed, so I don't really know what's made me more upset: the news or the feelings that are a result of it.  
I guess this is just a vent and I didn't really know where else to write this where I could be anonymous.",4.216502002670225,4.738897859813086,5.369559412550071,83.7910280373832,70.4018691588785,8.731108144192259,25.566088117489986,8.841846274778883,1.6823602136181584,409,11,85,7,7,136,73,107,0.132,0.8320000000000001,0.036000000000000004,-0.8615,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,3,5,3,0,1,9,0,12,1,1,2,0,22,20,8,2,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,5,1,0,1,3,1,0,2,7,2,10,2,10,11,2,12,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,4,6,63,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332852719205937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15219380066531185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15923775662880316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638271917553824,0.0,0.18302418112328547,0.0,0.0,0.3242809332185875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988221533671446,0.0,0.0,0.20998837423064493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3912602779322536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16943097011594307,0.0,0.0,0.20951848959610805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803683541493088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027468235090276,0.19067063428921152,0.0,0.3663463336581754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41701260409930735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15133023339877047,0.22230300202384773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yayabongocat,2020/02/20,"Do I deserve to be loved? This feeling of worthlessness just won't go away. It's constantly there...I would be happy and enjoying my overall time but all of a sudden it would grab my hand and push me down. I just don't know how to handle life, relationships, friendships and even myself. If someone is trying to get close to me (not romantically)I would start having hundreds of thoughts like why are they coming close, am I wasting their time, do they sympathise with me, would they be happy with being a person like me, am I acting according to their expectations and what not...I just want this hell to end",4.585306513409961,6.335425844827586,5.102183908045976,81.43898467432952,70.72413793103449,7.914176245210728,26.68199233716475,8.515128840125781,1.8664015325670504,482,16,90,8,9,154,74,116,0.085,0.698,0.217,0.9279999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,5,0,6,8,1,0,2,0,17,3,1,1,1,26,26,7,0,7,6,0,3,2,0,5,1,0,0,1,5,9,0,0,3,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,1,3,16,6,13,16,1,14,1,1,0,1,8,4,1,1,8,66,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815227820689049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16642929761503575,0.0,0.20878634107573915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17112258976653458,0.0,0.0,0.12761030856827793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976904278777395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009418187897625,0.0,0.10980305029114047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4113413659390945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618060515424968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364666493180506,0.1887807453068999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743753675930614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168699455450749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074302360312976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16370226230371618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675173799793885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533834631147873,0.2253191814049523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311737472918756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395751857927842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743377731836226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5489901365668963,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iDixonine,2020/02/20,"Question about getting help Uk, 18M, lives w parents.
I want to get help. I have had a huge decline in my mental well-being over the past 2 years and it’s getting to the point now where i’m not going to university, because i’m physically too depressed to even get up and go. 
I really want to go to the doctors to see if they can help, but I don’t want my parents to find out. They aren’t the type of people who are supportive about that kind of thing, they’re old fashioned and would just tell me to ‘man up’ or whatever. 
My question is, if i go to the doctors to get help etc, would it be possible to hide everything from my parents? bear in mind, we live together still and they don’t give me a lot of privacy. I’m from the UK too.",5.422500000000002,3.9638910828025473,6.644641719745227,82.37804538216562,68.10828025477707,10.14299363057325,33.00079617834395,9.188382445141503,2.5219050955414013,568,21,131,9,8,194,92,157,0.027999999999999997,0.855,0.11599999999999999,0.8442,4,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,3,0,9,3,0,0,8,0,11,2,0,0,0,22,29,8,0,7,6,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,4,4,1,0,0,1,1,15,2,25,25,2,18,0,1,1,0,17,9,0,6,5,82,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446695326307773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521531217390703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500696936720423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623950437631366,0.08068482481162809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978857440402698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165105398205832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31911500946106525,0.11718598220671125,0.2777029528702318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.327522237953487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720973303484692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21573715626335507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038551585458507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310747492966455,0.0,0.12334570129097855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12818525349779145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4069291241243628,0.0,0.11661452653856025,0.0846896246546206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547967933672733,0.13771584509686827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736919303669355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825814216118493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734485564963358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755628371631768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386245123947265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067722940294636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115696869449014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161575156199235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983555374314737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17355640578406584,0.0,0.0,0.07866634934565644
mentalhealth,iddlg,2020/02/20,"Snapchat introduces a Mental Health tool ‪Snapchat introduces a Mental Health tool called: ‘Here For You’, which provides proactive in-app support to users who may be experiencing a mental/emotional crisis, or who may be curious to learn more about these issues, and how they can help friends dealing with them.‬

‪[SnapChat Introduces’Here For You’](https://www.wtkr.com/news/national/snapchat-introduces-mental-health-tool-called-here-for-you)",15.817412935323384,15.432970343283586,10.555820895522393,59.16069651741296,47.05970149253731,14.306467661691544,49.19900497512438,13.023866798666859,6.6977900497512435,371,18,46,9,3,99,46,67,0.065,0.718,0.217,0.8176,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,5,2,0,1,0,7,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,6,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,3,0,25,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17718333597142635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17889151618198168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19518666167068385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13406113312047307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5533309852115195,0.0,0.0,0.11630680838048392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18110981369950688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6994694509327638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969084566675582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SatanicCucumber,2020/02/20,"How do i talk about this with my therapist? In February last year I was diagnosed with adhd and cluttering as speech disorder.

I used to selfharm and have suicidal thoughts. But I've been clean for about a year now. Only recently I talked about it with my best friends and girlfriend who all suffer from depression and have selfharmed before.
The urge to selfharm has come back and I've started thinking about the thoughts I had back then. I don't know if that means the suicidal thoughts have come back or are coming back. 

I've been thinking about the plans I made on how I'd kill myself a lot recently. Not necessarily making plans, just remembering the thoughts I had back then. 

I also have lots of trouble with social situations.
I don't know if it's only because of my speech disorder or If it could be social anxiety.
I can't order in restaurants, make phone calls, talk to the cashier, etc. Without becoming extremely nervous, shaking hands or crying.
It's especially bad with things like talking in front of people. I will start shaking and sometimes I can barely breath.

I've decided to talk with my therapist about it. 
I'm afraid he won't take me seriously or that It is not really something important. 
Can anyone give me advice on how to talk about this with my therapist? 

I'm not asking for a diagnosis just advice!",4.549616771011195,6.695563673306773,5.243540125213432,78.75751660026563,71.62948207171314,8.7650161259723,30.677480553974576,9.362217197678863,3.004075545437299,1066,47,190,25,21,344,133,251,0.168,0.7709999999999999,0.061,-0.9817,0,0,1,0,0,1,24.0,0,0,0,3,19,13,1,4,9,0,22,3,2,7,1,52,45,21,3,4,14,0,1,1,2,2,1,2,1,0,12,16,0,0,11,0,0,6,8,10,0,0,10,3,21,3,32,31,5,27,0,2,0,0,16,5,0,9,16,132,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548032759580599,0.1715321501123095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018820258259041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714243731401459,0.0,0.0,0.06136957030756333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820514247195166,0.0,0.0,0.3374416638094785,0.07328278588173542,0.053502683707629214,0.09693308786596913,0.07468427882340911,0.0,0.09210731726885743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962115134119443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268136136746864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07007577068132173,0.0,0.096409252950597,0.0,0.0,0.07559462717042757,0.08908288152561009,0.0,0.0,0.20117993578217408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788475010356308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780949819287461,0.0,0.0,0.0841952606658102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710251593402312,0.0,0.096470221298443,0.07154280210969345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042879112080274166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14923478014345934,0.0,0.08304839860941313,0.11717191799606914,0.0,0.0,0.09560530640283912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350335121249526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084742295292249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05622656016024456,0.0,0.17332102986629458,0.0,0.09942426794384984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865514082325937,0.0,0.1789372660955426,0.0,0.06756825290126356,0.08680499990453605,0.0,0.12424557581342675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200834389008248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599076798090267,0.4232685560170966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057169555000381,0.0583092960899232,0.11247664488649474,0.0,0.2787126068590293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580354993506802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084605418513021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303969406685425
mentalhealth,NickTimesTwo,2020/02/20,"I feel like a failure and I might have ADHD Ok, I just want to vent about my life at the moment, It's not like its permanent. I probably won't write much but I'm in the hardest part of my life yet and venting is the only way I can make it through this. I'm a 15-year-old guy in High School. Throughout all of my early education, I was told I had trouble ""focusing"" and never listened to teachers. I missed a ton of school and my grandparents (guardians) took me to shrinks and just thought I was a spoiled rotten brat. I began having bouts of early anxiety attacks at ages 8 or even 7. I had thoughts about the fear of our existence is limited and nihilistic fears. I was able to go through my life but I'd have these horrible attacks where all I could think about is how we're going to die and nothing is worth it and how horrible it is I was punished by being put on the Earth. very intense stuff for a child. I would cry all night. They all went away though, no idea why. My life got better and better and I was doing increasingly good in school. In 6th grade, I was doing horrible with the new environment and could never do homework. I went to transfer to an online school and never ended up signing up so I was stuck in limbo without school. The next year I had to repeat 6th grade I did alright because there was barely any homework because I was placed in the ""dumb"" classes. I did so well in those classes I skipped 7th grade and went back on track to 8th and passed with soaring scores. I got into high school with college and AP classes with a 3.2 GPA right off the bat. I had a ton of homework. I still had the habit of missing school from all my life. It became a go-to thing. I started missing some school and the work overtook me. I had so much work to do and I was too scared to say anything to my teachers. Whenever I'd have the work in front of me I'd get distracted by hobbies. Hours and hours on YouTube and calls with friends. I just had fun and forgot about school. My school self and real self completely split. I noticed I was having more fun not focusing on the schoolwork that I just sat there and stressed on and never completed. I started prioritizing having fun and forgot about all my work. My grades are almost all F's. this is hitting me hard though, Everyone around me thinks I'm stupid. My grandma hates me for driving her nuts every morning arguing about going to school. The county is going to ban me from getting a driver's license until I'm 18 for missing school. I could even get arrested. At this rate, I'm going to drop out of high school. I don't want to work because I don't even know If I believe in having fun while working anymore. When I was a child I always thought I'd be able to go to Stanford and work at some super cool game company where I can work on cool games all day. Now that just seems out of reach. My stress is immeasurably large. I have assignments due today that I haven't done. It's so horrible seeing me be a letdown to everyone including myself. I feel like garbage and I feel dumb. I was always told I was incredibly gifted knowing several coding languages at only 8. I was always so smart but now I'm just looked down on. I tried getting into relationships but It seems nothing worked out there either. My grandpa has dementia too so I have to deal with him. He can be incredibly annoying and it almost seems like he purposefully annoys me. My grandma has had enough of him too and that brings the entire mood of the house down. She was very skeptical when I said I think I have ADHD. I just know it. I see how other people live and how easy it is for them to take out their binders or notebooks and start working. But here I am writing a Reddit post at 4:58 AM staying up all night when I have an assignment due at 7 AM. All of this has brought back those anxiety attacks from earlier. I now have these nihilistic out of body experiences every once and a while because of the stress. I've even started balding due to stress. Stress is just overtaking my life. Its all work work work money money money happy happy happy but I am not getting anything out of this. I'm struggling. I don't know what to do and I don't want suicide I just want to wish I were never put into this society and world. It honestly feels like I don't fit into this working class. I don't want to go to school because I see no point in it. It just brings my mind to my missed grades and assignments. Everyone around me with their cheeky smiles and wonderful grades complaining about C's is killing me. I have 20s and 10s as grades. I miss weeks on end. What would medication solve? Would It really help me focus on my work? Do I have depression because I've lost care for life? I honestly just might drop out of high school and run away to NYC and live out my dreams like Casey Neistat. be some unoriginal youtube guy. No idea what I'll do with my life and that's what scares me. These decisions shouldn't have to be made by a kid who was 13 and carried up until now. Is there even hope for my education? I just want answers to my life and if what I'm doing is truly going to end me up homeless and sad akin to how the world portrays. How do I handle my grandma? How do I make her love me even though I'm a failure?

​

tl;dr: failure to society and I haven't even been through high school 

Please help me through this",2.478862004635648,4.471196680517085,3.6142654568752697,88.83317273446775,77.1163434903047,6.562605762526619,25.36311643771082,7.523968598718282,1.2323889686622564,4227,155,872,58,98,1367,395,1083,0.171,0.6940000000000001,0.134,-0.9936,1,0,0,0,0,2,99.0,1,0,4,21,66,66,13,11,35,4,103,13,2,10,16,171,192,77,3,17,27,1,5,6,1,7,10,3,3,7,43,65,0,4,22,3,4,22,22,36,1,0,50,15,126,29,135,125,23,136,0,9,4,1,39,63,2,16,52,587,169,51,0.06793282497940578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164205427663768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802491134063747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478832855201668,0.03680259374157584,0.041272908984103435,0.023098325250912582,0.0,0.051968425168926746,0.0,0.03368555414248281,0.0,0.0,0.05590292670623657,0.060474616826936965,0.0,0.11592509327266345,0.06382512528000407,0.05223614916612709,0.0,0.12423365873328175,0.0,0.0,0.038268515382784016,0.0,0.06008106319181857,0.0,0.037729027096487656,0.0,0.0,0.0346835048245692,0.0,0.03463102127597733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122627451482517,0.0,0.0,0.08135824950266594,0.0,0.037310509180081886,0.021905526084662758,0.03501787981671623,0.029255221305909324,0.0,0.03525177355937096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034759432863496566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025247910156466,0.035096383896248896,0.0,0.15704146573208191,0.0,0.057236334963865876,0.09736908819762066,0.0,0.03322566905848408,0.0,0.0764433145513932,0.06869775492518751,0.07279683560836163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026242366032215254,0.0,0.08873024306946882,0.0,0.17373505476763035,0.02848941527083745,0.05433208591769533,0.0,0.0,0.0672641771131405,0.0,0.10847363309448764,0.03042723390743904,0.033534800245483755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04553394062120261,0.17943689840411528,0.0,0.033736311661004555,0.06690014857919,0.03919267959528072,0.0,0.07668789058987326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03757880287716703,0.0,0.07466820802365322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21592333482870016,0.0995656405962177,0.0,0.05998592904386407,0.0,0.02852323183176734,0.0,0.03707835163382167,0.0,0.030656013409240294,0.03213984077125267,0.04534568818078442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034217587135544764,0.0,0.07206599196783624,0.034296393878828005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04993844281088613,0.0,0.13098495637484026,0.0328049728406682,0.03612366502334724,0.06375035434740255,0.0,0.06518337772616127,0.03867098574739291,0.03564203614235897,0.03617312075775169,0.0,0.05166597456717103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036782314723614505,0.0,0.023548033650179656,0.0,0.03548767166936105,0.03728492099145688,0.03210923871752982,0.0,0.03253043398150776,0.0,0.03662153755189286,0.0,0.0,0.06829125227646396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03866121360732956,0.021759753600603345,0.0,0.0,0.036467215438921716,0.0,0.02900713067688148,0.0323098365079023,0.02701145452378313,0.06801260878152084,0.5500131651167427,0.08120049932413019,0.0927652387241664,0.07086875205213625,0.03837237795843325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616640633750942,0.03620367633903596,0.027125620890480425,0.0,0.19454205373213052,0.03550906923305497,0.0388834159077202,0.03715374229190562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025538515020065586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022565775176808082,0.0652929168593312,0.10011548344271183,0.08089661229519443,0.0,0.0,0.03219618745187145,0.06491272546508044,0.0377379340624561,0.023060964466635175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05605169510898225,0.12020562075497362,0.026960957227962767,0.027245807276822076,0.0,0.030539884030394482,0.09446161401863858,0.03064940413445695,0.0,0.03905969806958669,0.032742409545817294,0.036835125434932364,0.37091929245786015,0.0,0.0,0.07238629466610416,0.0,0.041272908984103435,0.04374651202158183
mentalhealth,Bastardized-cornfied,2020/02/20,"I hate bugs I am at my peak happiness during the winter months. The joy of the holidays, the cool weather, the snow & rain, I love it all. But then spring comes around and it all goes away, and the worst part? The fucking bugs come back. Winter’s hardly even gone and there’s FUCKING BUGS EVERYWHERE

I can’t sleep anymore, they’re crawling on me whenever I lay down. And don’t get me started on the PEOPLE. 

NO, JUST BECAUSE YOU CANT SEE THE MOTH DOES NOT MEAN THAT ITS GONR

I DONT GIVE A DAMN IF IM OVERREACTING, PHOBIAS ARE BY DEFINITION IRRATIONAL

I can’t sleep anymore. My anxiety’s still it’s peak, I just want to die",0.4240476190476201,2.8851944206349245,1.936825396825398,93.64428571428572,92.88888888888887,5.339682539682539,20.49206349206349,6.937597516519254,0.5748444444444439,491,17,104,8,18,158,88,126,0.156,0.695,0.149,-0.4402,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,1,0,0,7,9,4,0,10,1,7,5,2,0,2,16,20,7,1,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,1,1,0,3,7,5,0,0,1,3,13,4,9,19,4,17,0,0,1,3,3,6,3,1,8,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18565411353147146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310797816875635,0.0,0.3398598336330873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15253491991621307,0.0,0.0,0.16098589596835966,0.13175506101325926,0.0,0.10445137800547126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952000766688442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778308566111663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994668066400133,0.0,0.20081709485896812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317290108447595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.316814587081096,0.08952159587537192,0.16437139950083854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824017833734425,0.153493016768509,0.16916942473532506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18508387480115224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464711628386738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866468241664648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676732747397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18555181413569144,0.0,0.11879025004138663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136541161801356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3429409549636491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212800994779364,0.0,0.13683772224792307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106474251729057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Draco509,2020/02/20,"I Can’t Sleep When I Head into School I Can’t Sleep.
I End up Skipping All My Classes since I’m Always Awake.I Can’t Calm down.So No matter what I Do I’m Always at the point of Burn out.
I’m going into Theraphy But I really need some tips on how I can get this Situation under control",-1.1361153846153833,0.8205557538461541,2.646442307692311,90.56043269230771,91.46153846153842,5.096153846153847,15.817307692307693,6.6274283507984215,-0.2417307692307693,224,5,52,3,8,83,46,65,0.042,0.894,0.065,0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,5,3,3,2,1,10,11,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,8,1,8,11,2,11,0,0,0,0,0,8,0,1,2,30,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255524897309065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28680730251679226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22648852643966846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336010857773049,0.0,0.1453293284828764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624384491277144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18961021650477566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24173432911628906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381825444855222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25879830226641964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21153096529978774,0.28743556276575466,0.5118014652512916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AreyouaUFO,2020/02/20,"Signed off work. Dont know how to spend my time I've been signed off work for two weeks by a doctor because my deteriorating mental health is affecting my ability to perform at work. 

I understand that I need time off to get my brain back into shape but I dont know what to do to facilitate that. Ive just started with a new therapist like had my first session last night. 

I want to keep busy but I dont have enough that I *need* to do to keep me busy at all times. What are some good activities to keep me occupied so I dont get myself into a spiral of depression and negative thoughts?",1.9902906110283176,3.8460069262295136,3.9207004470938887,86.70723546944859,78.09836065573771,7.7150521609538,23.38599105812221,8.575989854853784,1.4262032786885248,463,15,102,10,11,157,73,122,0.084,0.831,0.085,-0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,5,4,3,0,0,3,0,12,3,1,2,1,23,25,5,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,4,0,3,4,0,1,0,5,1,0,2,3,0,16,2,20,22,3,18,0,1,0,0,0,8,0,1,11,68,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072308783148952,0.0,0.07985017987207672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14622796262487367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282134200794275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13407363364071126,0.0,0.0,0.6140763847093165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13534750222521608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141987593439028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687355149511524,0.0,0.0,0.10986804817737657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392360557474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.349289318043933,0.0,0.0,0.1439771613153919,0.1067741881552908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399501062554364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200693174598951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942545869426984,0.0,0.12651078662907625,0.0,0.12292507473705272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927152704266794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520892797329639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399128720311,0.22914365633063896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795802282401084,0.1363650246211813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772611910233301,0.0,0.10507213426684738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860864521525905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,robinbanksgreyson,2020/02/20,"Like mother like daughter My beautiful 12 year old daughter has started having suicidal thoughts and harming herself. She has been jabbing a pen into her leg and giving herself massive bruises and sores. She gets bullied at school and on the bus because of her dental plates. I try to support her as much as possible but I don't handle this sort of thing very well, when I get stressed I tend to shut down. We've started seeing a therapist again, it helped her last time she was depressed until she didn't want to go anymore. I was hoping to never have to go through this with my children, she's just so beautiful, how do I support her through this? If anyone has been through something similar I would really appreciate some advice.",7.297826086956523,7.579877152173914,6.956340579710144,75.91320652173916,63.71014492753624,9.218840579710145,38.98913043478261,8.841846274778883,3.580939130434784,589,30,100,8,8,185,96,138,0.107,0.705,0.18899999999999997,0.9135,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,1,3,0,13,2,1,1,1,17,27,12,1,4,3,3,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,3,1,0,6,1,21,6,18,20,2,17,0,1,1,0,18,5,0,4,12,75,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735321311170452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761146979824024,0.12417021898502473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825299768220928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529520471269532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855596603100189,0.1703538724807798,0.20184911424534768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903019565200305,0.0,0.0,0.1763800682656693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475391240710878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17351624625062378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054399723023902,0.0,0.13696301942737088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863435704260249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001982410560974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376426872279725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17972355830031786,0.14151072349887153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367121313891851,0.0,0.0,0.2513884369624201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20342081886490931,0.0,0.0,0.1942470673030374,0.40303835087622064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20618764381993404,0.11797830794745033,0.0,0.0,0.14098112979335795,0.10355012239752427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205672548845599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14652463952003916,0.10474310197137142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15966851635215795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12614992536824074,0.0,0.0,0.11435768163225712
mentalhealth,throwawayski01028,2020/02/20,"Has a toxic relationship ruined me forever? I was previously in a long relationship which I am realizing 2 years later was toxic and should’ve been ended much sooner than when it did. I’ve recently met this girl who Im head over heels for and we seem to really have a connection. She always wants to hold my hand and calls me cute etc... The problem is in my last relationship the girl seemed like she was trying to hide it, would slap my hand away and I don’t think I received a compliment the entire time we were dating and honestly it’s fucking me up mentally. Whenever I get called cute idk how to respond and idk what to say whenever I receive any sort of affection really. With the previous gf, I always initiated anything from hugs to kisses to more. For some reason I’m still in contact with the previous gf because she’s beat me down mentally to a point where I feel bad cutting her off but it might need to happen. She tried blaming her cheating on me and everything that didn’t work out was always my fault. I’m just feeling like this is going to happen over and over again and if I’m just better off alone.

TL;DR: Feel like I can’t start a new relationship because of my toxic ex",3.9815312791783377,5.4314960420168115,5.531372549019611,78.9556209150327,71.77310924369748,8.986367880485528,27.08776844070961,9.444778638647367,2.4084446311858065,950,33,183,22,18,322,141,238,0.10800000000000001,0.755,0.138,0.649,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,2,0,0,3,7,17,3,0,11,0,17,7,4,3,0,36,35,13,0,5,4,1,5,3,2,2,0,1,0,2,10,14,0,1,8,0,0,3,3,7,0,0,9,6,27,10,31,24,4,31,0,1,0,3,26,15,1,6,16,118,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987249875572498,0.0,0.0,0.2889166968803985,0.0,0.0,0.07870767060667616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524476543964568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087422330926336,0.0,0.09663868154909147,0.1411089589630896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236327699155856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23636846771905284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251193999849584,0.0,0.12908151730252726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402031210719134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556598391877565,0.16537041238649713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700044705248613,0.06046975846516098,0.0,0.06577812852443463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046983043512744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878338816180585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12501985800837104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434414899790937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16963523456057047,0.0,0.0,0.10242691078312212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332788823322628,0.12278263242318245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508275956531246,0.0858202905153213,0.0,0.11178312577022263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941240791085588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107482549235408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482929606605188,0.11900075502635672,0.11428001548712935,0.4970489504378153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920416801725112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107320415062821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192188991214228,0.0,0.0924307026962986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416199136068384,0.0,0.0,0.06748935495952793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15716072705664874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826688587938286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426063556644284,0.0,0.0,0.08221889935205631,0.0,0.0,0.07453324041858027
mentalhealth,sug4bxn,2020/02/20,"Is something wrong with me? So, I've been wondering if I'm just very sensitive or mentally ill. Im 14 btw.
A week ago we watched a movie called ""they shall not grow old"" about the WW1. We know alot about wars and how many they were, when they were and so on. But It seemed kinda normal to me when I talked about them or told people about them.
But what I never realized is how terrifying they actually are. This movie really showed me reality. I never would've thought they would be that bad even though I knew so many people died under bad circumstances to say the least.
I feel bad for never realizing. So, now the important part. 
As the movie went on and the people actually started fighting, I was utterly terrified and shocked. All the noise together with the screaming made me tear up and I tried to hold it in because I didn't want to embarrass myself infront of my friends.
I was so shocked. Not even because of all the dead bodies, I mean they were really disgusting, but that wasn't what made me tear up.
I just felt so incredibly bad for the people that had to fight, I almost started crying like a baby. It felt so wrong and I had a weird feeling in my stomach. 
We had only 45 minutes to watch a part of the movie so we would watch 45 the next time. When the teacher closed the pc and we were packing our stuff for the next class I was still so in shock. But what made me question that It was ""normal"" for me to feel that way is that everyone was laughing again and playing it off. I just couldn't understand how you could possibly laugh after seeing something like that?
I thought to myself ""Am I the only one that was so shocked and almost had to cry?""
At home I told my sister about the movie and as I started explaining about the movie I started tearing up again and this time I cried for literal hours. I don't know what's wrong with me tbh.
The next part made me tear up again and then again. I was either very sensitive or just kinda ill because the other kids couldn't give less of a shit and the only thing they said was ""eww the dead bodies are so gross"" and started laughing.
I don't understand?!

TLDR: I cried hours over a WW1 movie and the other kids didn't give a shit.",3.446722689075628,4.87750870294785,4.238597438975591,87.77597539015609,73.08163265306122,7.546511938108578,25.215486194477787,8.124751697461798,1.3384442577030815,1722,54,362,26,34,552,183,441,0.19899999999999998,0.742,0.059000000000000004,-0.9965,1,0,2,0,3,0,45.0,6,1,9,0,36,28,6,1,31,0,35,7,5,7,5,84,69,44,4,9,15,1,5,2,1,3,2,3,1,2,23,24,0,1,19,2,0,2,12,21,0,1,33,12,55,7,43,29,9,46,0,0,4,0,32,14,2,12,31,255,78,2,0.0,0.0,0.13781617067991309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259414886520602,0.0,0.14141740485371188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23583556511693005,0.12913505704965866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15687021105908466,0.0,0.0,0.07210375062395205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056378721076134876,0.0,0.3102601842784455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328512797750339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932784185783466,0.0,0.0,0.06747373128709401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711213762721178,0.0,0.13559907450408445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05455541548468123,0.0,0.0,0.13547681519185692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07083057935629204,0.0,0.1390791286595175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627413886349664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761409750984903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899587336569858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672628473720245,0.0,0.14318096318478934,0.0,0.07691823936687404,0.0,0.0,0.07116127848961769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338325687172864,0.0,0.2252931254474765,0.0,0.13837146152248178,0.0,0.0,0.07409644725172199,0.0,0.047849184743340566,0.16111306648985782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294009381362596,0.0,0.19581660556913735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960552851051801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910270147417936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904729700872169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06716911702118862,0.05615427826063918,0.0,0.0,0.056269405138663936,0.06428340766377315,0.0,0.0,0.14496642457939696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087226482672835,0.0,0.0,0.2499011639695047,0.0,0.05639161941966048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083497150010101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05675604094437474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046912128235441296,0.0,0.06937689725286057,0.11211764187344124,0.0823499964565017,0.0,0.0,0.13494746257418802,0.0,0.04794158028320701,0.0,0.0,0.14702121115857647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165262122911204,0.04164936687893117,0.05604929912305109,0.0566414756343944,0.0,0.0,0.06545894266055745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657676788998917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504843113634642,0.2316126356195696,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aizaag,2020/02/20,"Manipulation and Drug Addiction I've been hooked on opiates since about 2012 after my boyfriend (now husband) beat me up and gave me a concussion.  I know, I know.  I lied about it and told everybody it was an accident.  I'm also extremely manipulative and use my small stature to get people, men in particular, to sympathize with me.  Sometimes going so far as to use my powers of manipulation to outright frame people with fabrications.  For the longest time I was just doing what came naturally, how my family taught me to behave.  Now that I'm getting older I'm starting to question my motives and my relationship with my husband.  I think I was just using him for financial support while I got my nursing degree.  I've wanted to leave him for awhile but he's starting to become very paranoid and lose his mind, getting a cache of all kinds of guns and weapons.  In part, he's scared that some of the people we framed in the past might try to do something to us.  He often participated in my endeavors, hacking and smearing people, etc.  But, it also seems to be a means for him to control me too.  He's always letting me know he's got guns.  I'm also worried about law enforcement.  My family has ties to extremists in another country.  Anyways, all these guns, dope, terrorism, etc. is starting to weigh on me and I'm just not sure what to do anymore.  I'm pretty sure I have a personality disorder, I'm just not sure what to call it.  Some people have called me a psychopath but I don't think that's right.  Maybe it's just because I'm a woman and women psychopaths operate differently?",4.0632565789473665,6.001075286184211,5.5326631578947385,77.05444210526319,72.45394736842105,8.285052631578948,30.252105263157894,8.954980946260402,2.717888842105264,1253,55,227,26,25,422,160,304,0.141,0.8390000000000001,0.02,-0.9869,2,0,2,3,0,0,36.0,2,0,0,5,18,9,1,2,10,0,15,3,0,9,5,54,48,20,0,1,10,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,12,15,1,1,9,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,10,0,33,5,40,35,7,23,0,1,0,0,23,11,0,6,10,148,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102814489424156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24269750562355444,0.0841748397337366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607711675438998,0.0,0.0,0.10032546352931343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06166738094733318,0.11172541714911513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20659530691571487,0.11570231190296505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346172002933035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569269826303994,0.11594034989566596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731573603429518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22564461276585235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19073295164178225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15855881831172966,0.0,0.05749266296805424,0.0,0.16181689281853995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105344595468471,0.16678787327923272,0.0,0.0,0.1071158900427888,0.0,0.10344493971908307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317433697693015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163076791935656,0.11019501157639484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731683406915823,0.10214472348364703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954852512501156,0.0965705204379819,0.3506647658467193,0.08833070583565346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029180634809797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332452713972653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861006700552077,0.0,0.0863917458060557,0.0,0.0,0.10128075187634432,0.0,0.0,0.0920940327026036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368220387614886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787940534679781,0.10005174743193172,0.0,0.21480882986851385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147973730613535,0.2860317996544238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964097550314713,0.0,0.0,0.05898834195591565,0.0,0.0,0.0966645708675176,0.0,0.06868231823535248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168536059379233,0.2621143128006937,0.0,0.08346919676052443,0.05966793446067739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273486271070097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stalin_ballin,2020/02/20,"My anxiety is killing all the fun in my life I can't get an erection with other girls . This is the second time it happened yesterday . This is the second girl . I was in a long term relationship with my ex girlfriend . We broke up but we still hang out and have sex sometimes . I am completely fine when im with her . Erection is normal and i last a good amount of time . I guess this is purely mental . I had this problem with my ex also but i talked to her frankly about it . She said it was okay and after that i was completely fine . Now that we broke up and i am seeing other girls , i cant get an erection at all . Even before I start making out , i have this fear that it will happen again . I need help",0.8894748858447521,2.9470740205479484,2.5114794520547927,94.39265296803656,82.76712328767123,5.263196347031964,19.322374429223746,6.42735559955562,-0.051285296803653235,541,14,121,5,15,177,83,146,0.125,0.762,0.113,-0.4183,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,3,0,0,0,7,10,1,1,7,1,16,2,0,1,3,23,26,8,1,3,2,2,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,3,14,13,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,2,5,2,23,5,15,20,4,20,0,2,1,1,16,7,0,1,12,91,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14680425003234787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404337879094333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15620815377022995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849481871455605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212490514050077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065720519317048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19181992289919667,0.0,0.0,0.15397335935439446,0.0,0.0,0.20222771705763,0.0,0.32466818087986893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304594066672116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982916761429668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20309769310838885,0.0,0.0,0.14963750349024252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12966391166886249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16245742192389526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253722786264468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18499965254849765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361179697726098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17986377456682245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17565575140252565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19709002849134855,0.0,0.0,0.17462113630690665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462848984828491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18155961317072286,0.0,0.12993478893881488,0.0,0.14660262182903833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475500170541419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21408722630026308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flatsound123,2020/02/20,For those who dissociate...do you find that it’s hard to read when in a bad dissociative episode? I dissociate often (depersonalization to be more specific) and when I’m having a really bad day I find it hard to read and sometimes can only read if I take my glasses off. I’m not sure why this is or if it’s just a me thing.,2.893970588235294,3.900165161764708,5.505176470588236,79.81629411764708,73.8529411764706,8.969411764705884,25.364705882352943,9.3871,1.891125882352941,253,8,57,6,5,91,47,68,0.184,0.816,0.0,-0.8677,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,1,11,7,7,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,6,1,6,6,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,4,3,38,14,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34494076639968485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332152017338731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775872852597293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3700774030733021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709947339639088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6198527660744647,0.0,0.13232870803378258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042947933414875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19468194842290407,0.0,0.1553086840842226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723040847507656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18638979675787806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aussie3221,2020/02/20,"Band Releases Song and MV dealing with Mental Health Sometimes music is therapy, knowing you aren't alone feeling a certain way. 4 Minutes Later released a song based on their personal struggles and made this music video to accompany it.

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nazh5cO0lys](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nazh5cO0lys)",17.306428571428572,21.704814880952387,10.379523809523814,45.582142857142884,43.04761904761904,10.361904761904762,44.95238095238096,10.504223727775694,5.837466666666668,283,13,25,5,3,73,38,42,0.145,0.8140000000000001,0.042,-0.5113,0,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,1,1,7,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,2,1,3,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195420729318809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180789321759205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560010817606362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3279509516387332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16955897958387794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29193675591816043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31092376652456954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693948436348692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051421880967388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3225405673709376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3528287802684095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24489525152283315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yoyoyoyo888,2020/02/20,"Yo IDK PLS help Please help

Hey, not sure what to say, or how this will even help me. I think about death all the effing time. About how life is meaningless. Everyone dies sometime. What’s even the point. 
I have no idea what’s wrong with me but thoughts constantly randomly cross my brain about how I can off myself to make it seem like an accident to others. I have a great family and friends who care about me but I still feel alone all the time. I have amazing friends at home, but have been isolating myself from friends at college for no reason I can rlly explain. I want to be alone all the time but yet hate being lonely, idfk. 
I was the valedictorian of my highschool and am in college right now. Grades are awful in college bc all of a sudden I can’t get myself to give a shit. Can’t get myself to care about anything. In highschool, I used to perform at restaurants all the time (singing and playing guitar) and I absolutely loved it as music is my main passion; but now, I can barely get myself to touch a guitar,  much less get out of bed. Can’t focus on anything or have motivation to do anything. Brain just feels foggy. 
I thought that seeing a free counselor through my school might help me, so I made an appointment. She explicitly said that I’m bad at talking about my feelings (which Ik I am but still.. lolol) then signed my up for a permanent counselor with someone else. I never ended up going to the 2nd person bc I hate opening myself up to rando ppl and talking ab my feelings and  I wouldn’t even know what to say in the first place. 
Overall, idk what’s wrong with me or what to do with myself but it’s incapacitating.",2.883017506631297,4.915677603076926,3.775766578249339,87.95292307692308,76.04615384615384,6.20583554376658,24.745358090185675,7.0983637204850245,0.9823315649867376,1291,44,259,14,29,413,169,325,0.14800000000000002,0.6709999999999999,0.18100000000000002,0.9394,0,4,0,0,0,1,35.0,0,0,0,3,19,20,3,0,16,1,25,6,3,8,8,56,53,22,2,2,12,0,5,1,3,3,1,3,2,1,15,12,0,0,13,4,1,2,8,7,0,1,6,9,39,14,45,42,8,35,0,1,1,2,19,18,1,6,16,183,54,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20693424743215316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24662959472800344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341301402229122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22304471444515975,0.0,0.0,0.20371109339094906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795729882797807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368128156721454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345431830017665,0.0,0.08848247670062713,0.0,0.0,0.19795065344775406,0.0,0.0,0.09545951716309048,0.0,0.0,0.09417760461466987,0.0,0.2020514303893924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497558868085434,0.0,0.0,0.23154938320991825,0.0,0.2087762262450467,0.09583397211265214,0.056775939706726286,0.0,0.0,0.11014100961248977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972627595996813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678456623160028,0.0,0.10020867049673443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277586876094572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054902879476270816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056290543037633,0.048806495743589584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016439279738936,0.0945285738579206,0.06668457483724566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597898559704666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343859935704349,0.0,0.077049673090045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722954495192284,0.10437509682510117,0.10966110357584996,0.09443856816946264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271468410539436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531475666327873,0.0950285593638161,0.15889028773565878,0.0,0.10110496593543848,0.07960802142001301,0.09094595689501528,0.0,0.0,0.10254675879956664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464564281016519,0.0,0.09880446802236917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595618519729084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415534303573987,0.0,0.0,0.16059299408197727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401241331244051,0.0,0.15862018825021093,0.2330118921887306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628223528343222,0.0,0.0,0.05892409351862325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184517336684272,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jazzz_Trumpeter01,2020/02/20,"I'm tired of being upset. I feel like it's a personality trait for me at this point to be sad.  I want to say I've accepted it but I haven't not even after years of the same feeling. I'm tired of being upset but were at the point where the feeling of overwhelming sadness and anxiety is so fond to me that I'm afraid that if happiness does come my way I'll push it away. I'm not going to waste your time. My reason for posting is because I've always known something is off for me but I've never been formally diagnosed with anything and I feel like if I'm able to put a title on these feelings I'll be able to distance myself from them.  So if you know what I might have please comment... These are my symptoms. 

1. Constant unsourced and sourced sadness.
2. Angry outbursts.
3. Violent mood swings.
4. Anxiety that causes my chest to seize.
5. Alchohol, TCH and nicotine dependency.
6. Easy to make friends but hard to keep friends.
7. Low energy.
8. Unable to eat.
9. Sudden urges to stop speaking even in mid sentences.
10. Sudden tremors.
11. Uncontrollable shaking in stressful environments. 
12. Cutting in the past.
13. I can carry conversations with my own inner voice and refer to different sections of my personality in the third person.
14. Sudden feeling of impending doom.
15. Suicidal thoughts in the past.
16. Uncontrollable Impulses.
17. Feeling lonely even when receiving attention. 
18. Unable to get over small problems.

Listen, my family is not very supportive and have a very distorted view on mental health which prevents me from reaching out conventionally.  They view mental disorder as a stain on themselves or making it seem like they are bad parents. I'm trying everything at this point I am so tired of not being able to be happy or get over small issues like everybody else. I wanna know why and I want to know how to fix it.  If anyone can help Id appreciate it.",1.5441514891793418,4.284654852367692,3.3398259052924786,83.41422568030859,91.00557103064068,6.104156845939577,24.452592671952004,7.468242284971852,1.749490207842297,1488,63,266,30,52,494,208,359,0.20800000000000002,0.633,0.158,-0.9802,2,2,1,0,0,0,53.0,0,2,3,0,10,30,2,8,10,0,21,8,1,6,1,57,50,23,1,8,14,1,8,4,2,1,6,4,0,3,15,11,1,3,17,0,0,6,6,18,0,1,3,14,26,11,49,40,3,46,2,7,2,0,18,26,0,9,16,156,41,0,0.2707614491207805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07509840530531467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380878449804805,0.0,0.0,0.06310756691417163,0.0,0.0742712007519294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479643145694889,0.0,0.07535816676752212,0.05501788875570558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271553097360673,0.0,0.0777456711867961,0.0,0.09753231224417667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916057237912878,0.0,0.09429602856480253,0.10343869278809034,0.0,0.07898172291826734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235218604014488,0.07539548246337112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17883538353223122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111431055691097,0.0,0.08508326569306614,0.0,0.31944528967571617,0.12895468890172085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13945974929193358,0.0,0.0943077879326102,0.0,0.05129332374512772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921537315851727,0.0808496918145506,0.0,0.0,0.09593558634640607,0.0,0.0,0.06049523064642141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942015356163838,0.0,0.0802217389052183,0.0,0.0,0.14880341141315126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17637382313512304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204902465234869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18190923796084324,0.09574503648004848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960930715860474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002161822638156,0.0,0.17231496032157165,0.0,0.2364184536163165,0.0,0.0990715876658167,0.2559570872537411,0.0,0.0864382076267363,0.0,0.0,0.08636071322538344,0.0,0.09073001372681383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279595498394448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717734573032184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216368473023783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948179724691098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545623178670098,0.10338544172013647,0.0,0.0,0.09872302632555106,0.10241896126464103,0.0,0.09380827278124612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165144875151469,0.05262772612940742,0.31120045514612305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06127641690156786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893770130502776,0.10646807858579067,0.07163927846800243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814400311940489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058120498656989365
mentalhealth,nophyn,2020/02/20,"Just venting my family found out about my self harm, I can't find a therapist, and I fear I'm becoming a danger to myself and others. I can't do this anymore. I shouldnt've been born if I were born just to suffer. I'm this close to stabbing either myself or someone else in the chest",3.8270338983050856,4.5167808135593255,5.362500000000002,82.88747881355934,71.37288135593221,7.933898305084746,26.614406779661017,8.07648339933343,1.6198440677966102,224,7,45,3,4,76,41,59,0.23600000000000002,0.764,0.0,-0.9274,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,1,3,0,5,1,1,0,0,11,8,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,9,0,6,5,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,2,2,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3097957059801984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449977031158119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26095229859282104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944828128817385,0.3515128547202481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855084488429892,0.0,0.0,0.34250709255272205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32587908426655005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26467743679517586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3626957171284633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lilmizzvalz,2020/02/20,"I am done with taking medications. My mental health is declining. Suicidal ideation is coming. This is how it always goes. After two years of trying different medications, I’ve decided I had enough of that. So for the past two weeks I’ve been on no meds. 

I feel like I low energy, no motivation, unable to do basic self care like showering every day, my brain is feeling like mush. I can’t work. I don’t know what else to do. Then I start feeling like I’m better off dead. I have a little energy for planning a suicide. But not enough energy to actually go through with the plan. 

How do you improve your mental health without medications?",2.6002814258911826,5.165133105691061,4.6008130081300855,78.92909943714822,79.73170731707317,8.012257661038149,24.09568480300188,8.841846274778883,2.2042863039399623,504,18,92,13,13,172,83,123,0.142,0.638,0.22,0.7096,2,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,2,0,5,3,7,0,0,4,0,14,6,1,3,0,14,24,5,3,0,3,0,3,4,0,0,5,0,1,1,4,3,0,0,6,0,0,2,6,1,0,2,3,3,12,6,14,21,2,13,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,11,60,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.12637620351436907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077568332178348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453484016858236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14456812750511974,0.0,0.0,0.13203689402283958,0.0,0.0,0.1115553291634454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835186927669819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530302516879836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252648591322785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818310184022926,0.0,0.0,0.2676223426485208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911182540149376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964417562446259,0.2775508117944772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359951399129079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753111716701999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711714375323184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530744103858933,0.12979598302966625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14384858917745552,0.3913818097071727,0.2610170393903529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362522456249388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509982610200594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166285843085292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28331042821143554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737010567297902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792400596795995,0.0,0.25301113996069546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387945938146301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483622775088035,0.0,0.09427969395608107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339565740253307
mentalhealth,bdt603,2020/02/20,"I cut myself for fun I just cut myself for the first time in a little while, but it wasn’t because I was sad or anything - I was just bored. The thing is, I don’t really feel much in my day-to-day life, to the point where it becomes a problem. 

For example: I’ve been cheated on (and I’ve cheated) and it hasn’t effected me in the slightest. No feeling of anger, sadness, or anything. 

It’s hard for me to socialize because I never know how to react in situations because I just don’t really care. Cutting gives me a little glimpse into what excitement/ sadness feels like (and it feels really good imo), so whenever I’m bored I cut.",2.9837209302325576,4.331086635658913,4.9913875968992265,82.25312790697677,74.11627906976744,7.950697674418605,29.17906976744186,8.548686976883017,2.2337404651162798,492,21,99,9,10,170,73,129,0.28800000000000003,0.603,0.11,-0.9759,0,0,0,0,0,2,21.0,0,0,0,2,6,18,7,0,7,0,8,1,0,3,1,20,16,9,0,1,6,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,6,0,0,0,6,13,0,1,4,5,14,5,14,12,1,14,0,3,0,0,2,10,0,2,5,67,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28866842551768396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207554306708319,0.1937087524718502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178825742672441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262290759203027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547376482641517,0.12530141774843825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149189938573633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16825378481873535,0.0,0.1471120589690814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15711845912959752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639188552542392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238858793467446,0.08568858674610128,0.3515814762677563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893467755969193,0.0,0.13527456736539487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16580390207238907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782824877587593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370854183295293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19715006170269192,0.0,0.1787919654123592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652389552170828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227357768924493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ndmae,2020/02/20,"Weird mental ""situation"" that happened often when I was younger This may or may not be the place to post, but something that I considered normal when I was younger is really plaguing me now that I'm older. 
This weird 'mental thing' ( I have no vocabulary to name this) no longer happens, I'm in my 40s, but happened a lot as a child and faded in my twenties. I never made a big deal of it because when it happened it was just ""normal"". I found myself thinking lately as to why this no longer happens, which then leads my thinking into why this even occurred in the first place.
I'll try to explain. 
From as long ago as I can remember, my 'thoughts' sort of faded into the back of my head and other thoughts not my own would come forward.... Sometimes it was random sounds or talking I couldn't understand.  I could feel this coming on and would just think ""ok here it goes"". Nothing frightening but I could 'feel' a change happening. My own mind just waited in the background until the episode was over.... Usually a few minutes.... Then it faded. I could function as I still had control and was fully aware of what was happening. 
It really is hard to explain.  
There was not anything specific that would happen before it occurred. It was always completely random and occurred frequently. This happened, as far as I can remember, into my twenties. I basically just ignored when it happened and kept doing what I was doing until it went away. 
What the hell was happening? I can't seem to let this go.",4.241924144310822,6.181175539007096,4.925072463768117,81.59021739130436,71.97872340425532,7.315695343817453,29.636756090040087,8.04050195162591,2.1832443416589578,1170,49,208,17,23,376,139,282,0.084,0.893,0.023,-0.9425,0,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,0,3,15,5,1,0,11,1,31,1,1,3,1,62,63,26,0,9,12,0,3,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,29,11,0,4,14,0,0,6,9,4,0,1,18,4,26,1,30,34,4,43,1,0,0,0,6,15,1,10,23,167,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831156629054114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412246408043085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341615887932878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240308376910533,0.05925657438600392,0.0,0.046976797725280135,0.0,0.06557480889590271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152227650044411,0.13276564230136906,0.08079893141821735,0.0,0.08643253839387706,0.18458524376433216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944841391734771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050899285234418654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793058427659857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554962033562083,0.0,0.08449543675011348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379659323045704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7496106554656288,0.0,0.0690331763799189,0.0,0.07908871612128025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693025074936908,0.0,0.0,0.0788019846835625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819819669625164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551607876986057,0.0,0.07291873140798215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15532245364759073,0.0,0.07781150974927964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059435620234474275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101046084782424,0.07394388239985275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16102855127193824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380490759009466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873686927070767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17459437174050688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015512381935582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662187153711741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05932674642151858,0.0762171285526912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154249108031904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06194019926222636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051197132893152364,0.14813628671016327,0.0,0.12235858884621842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052320616207149014,0.0,0.0,0.08022514399710487,0.0,0.0,0.08487384126134702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07143803345732551,0.13907447045563298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16422971152669388,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Letmesee11,2020/02/20,"How is involuntary hospitalization helpful and not detrimental? While I understand what involuntary hospitalization is trying to do, it seems like pulling someone away from their life and giving them thousands of dollars in medical debt while also making it so they lose at least a weeks pay and possibly even be fired from their job would cause so many more problems than it helps. Especially when so many people say that even taking a sick day or two would cause significant financial strain. 

I'm someone that cant really afford to miss work and while my financial situation blows, it's not the biggest factor in my suicidal ideation. If I was hospitalized for feeling suicidal for my other reasons and got out to the additional financial mess, you can bet Id be pushed into full blown active attempts immediately.

Maybe theres something I'm missing but it just seems like it would cause way more problems than it helps...",9.393062330623305,9.68018280487805,8.85691056910569,64.01871273712737,59.365853658536594,12.166937669376695,38.953929539295395,11.645159339076185,4.827731165311652,756,34,120,20,9,241,113,164,0.156,0.759,0.085,-0.8856,3,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,4,3,11,9,0,1,4,0,11,3,0,6,0,30,23,17,2,6,6,0,2,2,0,3,3,1,0,0,11,8,0,0,5,0,4,2,3,7,0,2,2,3,10,2,16,16,4,17,0,3,0,0,10,8,0,5,8,81,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405649273111682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225152484609593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4010056146358034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391629329852464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718853648092604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0657923134209556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482245173834206,0.0,0.0,0.10406842638173863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616490127722904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12912349569393533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190722938257008,0.1271396003978742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14557040307520108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868557562711631,0.2638414379858694,0.13072249633659175,0.0,0.0,0.13108167623714956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090208456567293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14669015102750366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490135185455223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833578640473893,0.1337844859909754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347622474242177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369117561355189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14625973548593355,0.0,0.0,0.22049960847105254,0.10017232466668913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846591607300676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783364748008036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834257850962751,0.0,0.12710781458213571,0.13545895663671506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328277830929497,0.10437398973027576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472852349577718,0.0,0.0,0.27729941342277264,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,house12venus,2020/02/20,"Finding a private psychiatrist in the UK, help I've been saving up for over a year and now have enough money to see a private psychiatrist and pay for it myself. I was wondering if anyone in the UK has experience with seeing a private psychiatrist and if anyone has any advice?

I have been in and out of treatment for years now but no one knows whats going on with me. I've been treated for (had therapy and meds) depression, anxiety, psychosis, symptoms of PTSD and have a tic (but am not officially diagnosed with anything but have my psychiatric notes and that's the stuff mentioned). It's all so vague there's a mention of ""possible personality disorder"" in one paragraph from 4 years ago and no ones ever mentioned it since, it's just there ??? What's the point if no one ever investigates further ??? I am tired of all this vague nonsense.

I'm 25 and have never had a job, dropped college multiple times, got into uni then dropped out of uni in January 2015 due to an episode of psychosis (I was treated for this but no diagnosis), I have no friends due to self-isolation and for the life of me I cannot get my life together which I am beginning to despise and hate myself for - life feels utterly hopeless.",7.664127324749643,6.876147712446352,8.137864806866954,71.30133226037195,63.29184549356224,11.543490701001431,39.15915593705293,10.864195022040775,4.2609945636623765,959,46,178,22,12,319,125,233,0.20600000000000002,0.77,0.024,-0.9925,2,1,0,0,0,1,30.0,0,0,0,0,8,8,2,0,13,0,19,6,0,0,5,36,30,20,0,3,9,0,1,0,1,0,6,0,0,1,11,17,0,0,4,0,2,1,8,4,0,4,8,3,13,4,33,22,3,30,0,2,2,0,6,13,0,4,14,130,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13554037084091666,0.12295311473428065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432377375308927,0.0,0.10610851489643243,0.0,0.0,0.1939707352210918,0.0,0.11414193352754574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946592861515475,0.14078208417084553,0.0,0.0,0.15896730195368114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14331876178124894,0.0,0.0,0.2509322090634661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13567955499040574,0.0,0.0,0.07013313110928414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267733428645879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10716270419954506,0.0,0.07246734368337407,0.0,0.07882892817201638,0.0,0.11093460941354676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369419157817549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297066056923824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376427515909095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622833131477158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939131381626929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406936118161538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10697741291586126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3759588656990282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111136458527293,0.0,0.0,0.13112052650036,0.15636841234975954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16213806465447678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210589568345302,0.0,0.1446989784349275,0.0,0.0,0.11473774388036878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878339598158403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416701935241996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862061228306867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087967283082675,0.15942034644838654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15041904553465213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679633300847727
mentalhealth,Yahsorne,2020/02/20,"Should I talk to my GP about my mental health, what should I ask and say? I haven't had a psychiatrist/psychologist in over four years but I really need one. I have no idea where to start or look. I can go to my GP right now, I just don't know if it's necessary or what I should really say. Please help.",-0.016623376623375208,1.907895606060606,2.211385281385283,96.00136363636366,85.36363636363636,6.8017316017316025,13.974025974025974,7.957251820313856,-0.2158155844155845,234,3,60,5,7,79,46,66,0.047,0.8320000000000001,0.122,0.6719,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,0,0,12,14,5,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,3,11,0,6,10,0,8,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,3,3,40,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434226475512044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479814719901577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767746023697397,0.0,0.0,0.17452901519745825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939403407573449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430995059414974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186558639086514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26240448889423423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930704506493008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764420360774427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858219804206412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33361561200650985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223653776358088,0.0,0.4141335006609659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18430019414296894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20928572717874586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16767790262139612
mentalhealth,xkokopellix,2020/02/20,"Broke down today I had a panic attack today at work. Boss called me to her office to tell me that I made a mistake but it wasn’t a conversation.  I absolutely am no good with being confronted when there’s talking down involved and I felt like a complete idiot.  

My response to her was that I’m human and we are over loaded with work. My response should have been to just say okay and tell her I’d fix it.  She got more pissed off at me. I went to my office and the tears started coming down so I went to close the door so that no one would see me.  She took that as me slamming the door (my door shuts hard on its own) and called me back to her office to give me a write up.  She wrote that I have issues with making mistakes then went to list any mistake I’ve ever made in the past year, how I lost control and slammed the door, talk back and the list goes on and on. 

I tried to explain to her that I didn’t slam the door but she yelled at me more and told me that I’m not there to talk to her. I was there to read the write up and sign in.  She also said that I don’t need to act like a 5 year old.  That I should grow up.  I ended up writing my reasoning on the page and she walked away smirking.  I love my job but situations like that drive me more anxious.  

I hate that I’m always on the defense but today was just overall a shitty day.",1.6880066195276058,2.861405837370242,3.1519572739581783,94.84462614713405,77.13148788927336,5.718128479013089,20.523694899954872,5.7926816847441245,-0.2018811193019409,1033,23,247,5,23,339,139,289,0.183,0.74,0.077,-0.9851,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,4,13,18,6,1,17,1,16,2,1,7,1,47,40,22,0,7,7,0,2,3,0,3,0,3,5,1,14,17,0,2,3,1,0,9,6,12,0,1,19,6,45,6,39,17,5,46,0,2,1,1,33,22,1,0,18,168,59,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290429850471428,0.09666606688582187,0.0,0.0,0.07900229754919763,0.0,0.0,0.13124354204089522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216468600587705,0.1091492886110105,0.17866125593168716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372532673633031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000736063631712,0.12180621909631165,0.0,0.1302990092054764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492261325932556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289567361963976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508602580407324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154524972396876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114446779054414,0.0,0.09744123168152342,0.09291495317325556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040690768980995,0.1146977643819412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12125546348979604,0.11528475997091013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027023125297994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681763446435265,0.0,0.10485156247132284,0.2198532782106374,0.07754704099358739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861415421748602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219050608210936,0.0,0.07872250280179413,0.0,0.0,0.13630514716971492,0.0,0.0,0.1109012196207979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620542917490875,0.0,0.0,0.11944621133755122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050806886799634,0.09238622040098886,0.0,0.0,0.09257562960464573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305844332070434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222854866299023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801287597413527,0.20308237714556934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.330358078353148,0.11100922677757892,0.12907357842215714,0.07887451392141978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230833602268677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16915209791864885,0.0,0.0,0.0825266699002997,0.0,0.0,0.14962448237808995
mentalhealth,violetpools11,2020/02/20,"Mental Health Pen Pal Hello,

Would anyone be interested in being a mental health pen pal with me? I heard about the concept recently and thought it sounded really neat. To disclose a little bit about myself: I was diagnosed with Bipolar 2, ADHD, and GAD a few years ago and it seems as though the bipolar could actually be BPD. If anyone is interested please message me! :)",4.669754901960786,7.0967307794117644,5.835882352941179,73.40813725490199,72.08823529411767,8.062745098039215,28.98039215686275,8.841846274778883,2.75596274509804,295,12,47,6,6,98,50,68,0.0,0.805,0.195,0.9229,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,0,7,5,0,0,0,10,10,6,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,1,5,2,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,5,3,7,2,2,5,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,3,32,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.19476594241843634,0.0,0.2398621050746476,0.0,0.1769198539397327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791086197211245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178948738704292,0.0,0.25137002759569177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935219631436204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20257433756489265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4242985492325984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20003636961626226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40226900516402975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190841402948852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785911258090188,0.0,0.197065879605252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816944762539125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960910205073612,0.158448011387072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417792923104167,0.0,0.0,0.12852604648597946
mentalhealth,Yaars23,2020/02/20,"Why do I feel so good now that I've been diagnosed? For the past few months things have been really hard for me, after my situation changed in life. I always thought that I could get out of any ""funk"" by doing healthy positive activities--but I began to notice that regardless I remained feeling ""off"".

I decided to go to a therapist, and she gave me inventories and it turns out I have moderate depression, and possibly some OCD tendencies.

For some reason I feel really relieved. Like, I'm not making this all up--I'm going through something and now I have a roadmap and strategies to work through it.

Anyone ever experience this?",5.238461538461539,7.101074897435898,6.221880341880343,73.60923076923079,69.25641025641025,10.328205128205127,33.51282051282051,10.504223727775694,4.008343589743589,501,24,87,15,9,166,83,117,0.046,0.804,0.15,0.9038,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,3,0,8,2,0,2,2,21,20,6,0,2,1,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,6,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,5,4,13,3,16,14,4,13,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,2,8,62,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977973314929894,0.0,0.0,0.1305832173300488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13426796694622067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031364167263736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331590582134266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539038568076705,0.19490078441498573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17369711731964407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878367680976736,0.0,0.0,0.2912800093957386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032485462581953,0.0,0.21826385119677386,0.16106100617709487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17201619835751353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563255465627352,0.09381345143242764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817781788006585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327209163574226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186211199887541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18330907471256447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21647872599832846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460315717793121,0.1974331261015434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21584353810441526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14782981046948362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229551978842273,0.12757251844558426,0.0,0.0,0.1524459715853312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20886747083753268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17327220729858606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397960935920208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amyriver777,2020/02/20,"i don’t know where else to post this for over a year now i have been paranoid. every single day that passes by i feel incredibly uneasy. I used to think that it was just because I wasn’t getting enough sleep, but no matter what I do the paranoia never ends. I am incredibly uneasy about certain things that just stay and click, for example I will be fully convinced that someone will be following me everywhere and every time i turn around they have already been studying my every move, therefore they already know where to hide. Undistinguishable chatter like loud talking around me; knowing that people are talking but unable to fully distinguish what they are saying really freaks me out. I get very offended very quickly and when i hear that chatter i always hear them talking about me. I start to feel uncomfortable about my posture and hand and feet placement and always end up feeling very very uneasy. I always feel them making fun of me. I feel like my friends do the same when I can’t hear them properly, but seem like i can hear them. The days I do not get much sleep I’ll hear whispers, sometimes identifiable sounds and voices and i’ll ask the people around me and they wont hear anything, I always tell myself that it’s not real and that I am just tired, but it’s always very difficult for me to decipher what is reality and what is in my head. Not only that, but I will have these dreams while I am asleep about certain real life people that I have only seen never communicated with, and become extremely uncomfortable with them in person because I feel like all that in my dream also happened in reality, but I tell myself that I can’t be uncomfortable by something like that but I can’t help it. I feel in a way that I am special, and that some how everything is a sign meant for me and that everyone really is taking and looking at me. I don’t want to get into too much, but if any of this is in any way relatable please comment.",6.53670274170274,6.6654609338624375,6.844242424242427,76.59545454545456,65.32275132275132,9.412409812409813,31.467532467532468,9.095868883498916,2.596450793650795,1555,54,287,24,22,504,170,378,0.10300000000000001,0.7490000000000001,0.149,0.9612,0,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,9,0,19,14,1,0,7,0,35,8,6,4,5,67,69,29,0,2,15,0,8,5,1,4,2,11,0,1,28,22,0,0,14,2,0,3,13,3,0,0,6,22,55,11,35,56,7,37,0,0,3,0,26,16,0,3,19,210,83,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583711899112019,0.05738401878840495,0.29853771502810145,0.0,0.0,0.09759439336728368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904986790260184,0.1916367359721457,0.06708307556643463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748475937949772,0.0792499299119905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255461192102693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059943736399055626,0.0,0.1271107443523805,0.07414412643627466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813750129723512,0.0685668548992666,0.06449053300477017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539773420449163,0.10252637991543333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05543925296781146,0.0,0.1499602096970959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06345444695062448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364334772206257,0.0,0.4852518864881627,0.0,0.04809718090246192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830725366554455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0506840663110541,0.17528414197166658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06025777793967444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04789833117501471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626629746286889,0.10549925111221364,0.0,0.11068678978912204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091488103756213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924173294712376,0.06265541382771762,0.0,0.07876759908739643,0.0,0.0,0.06872333677685767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16335027097695026,0.09193869812654704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706401848576523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06532484570859087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361757355081745,0.0,0.06079944337560325,0.0552420171954588,0.0709694729621832,0.0,0.05078994898369385,0.07648337685941327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053952307230284866,0.17302659049037075,0.12543750002185255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04767213889578606,0.04597896559488415,0.0,0.0,0.041842063202069416,0.08247407510836002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805097212081458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06197497832464361,0.0,0.29603505459518875,0.0423241169705436,0.1139146772193085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04620913265683823
mentalhealth,looseygoosey-juicy,2020/02/20,"I’m going to the doctor tomorrow to talk about medication for anxiety. Would it be weird to ask for medication when I only have mild anxiety and situational anxiety? I’ve had some mild to moderate levels of anxiety while in college. The biggest issue for me is I have a lot of anxiety around driving and I’ve have panic attacks while driving. Now I’ve had to pull over a few times and one time had to call my bf while on the highway because I was freaking out so bad. Is this bad enough to warrant needing medication though? I don’t have a constant sense of anxiety, it’s just when I’m in situations like that or when I have a lot going on (work, school, personal life).",3.360312075983714,5.114275492537317,5.540013568521035,77.0406037991859,73.92537313432835,9.051831750339213,30.83853459972863,9.573946990214177,3.1141134328358215,532,25,102,14,11,186,79,134,0.212,0.77,0.018000000000000002,-0.9696,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,9,7,1,1,7,0,14,5,0,0,0,12,20,12,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,1,5,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,6,0,1,4,0,7,1,21,14,5,25,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,4,12,73,11,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5902627520721515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144794928931839,0.12022177950802924,0.14629880091596034,0.0,0.0,0.2147479329243759,0.07839215304029301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13131294590712955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389687630830117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162551197591266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287612031755575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461704247804803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422291119639432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09083257726583288,0.06282649174754226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21865885808401708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886468963845343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535379464884647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871413394383858,0.0978045811386988,0.0,0.15088205626059642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228682171437504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13014805122149484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890991016409821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336220889951557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634689149087205,0.0,0.149973067095247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362088257379513,0.0,0.0,0.09135233635302734,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,graysonh14,2020/02/20,"I just feel so dull I’m a senior (M) in high school, and I’m just so bored and I feel so dulltbh. I’m incredibly bored and unstimulated in school. This year I’ve really just kept to myself at school I can’t really stand anyone there and I really only have one friend I hang out with outside of school. I have a beautiful girlfriend who’s incredibly sweet and caring but I honestly don’t seem to feel much from the relationship which is upsetting to me. I havent been doing much outside of school besides a little bit of video games, YouTube, music. I haven’t always been like this in fact I used to really enjoy high school and spend more time with friends but I just don’t really care anymore. I’m not really depressed necessarily, I get out of the house just fine I don’t really feel sad so much as just frustrated as to why nothing is really bringing me joy. I play soccer one night a week and that’s fun but it’s just one night a week. I can’t really find anything that makes me happy and keeps me stimulated. I don’t know what to do.",1.5913466440101942,3.825162892523366,3.698028887000852,85.87490229396771,81.28971962616822,7.44231096006797,20.00764655904843,8.438071523408619,1.1439700934579442,825,22,174,19,22,281,106,214,0.084,0.6709999999999999,0.24600000000000002,0.9902,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,12,20,1,1,7,0,16,0,0,3,1,36,34,17,0,0,11,0,4,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,8,12,0,2,7,4,1,2,9,7,0,3,3,5,21,13,21,31,5,19,0,3,0,0,6,9,0,1,8,104,29,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684886068362032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159384911420004,0.06457852997214325,0.0,0.07600237496636023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083049858565793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883293072161244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07954740227106999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18679496179539884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441310605456089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271039179509667,0.0,0.04825299569777066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831630437684992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951615951268445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656818546155404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209161315558051,0.0,0.0,0.05075728122519546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045121222305733004,0.09256650478003717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06164936612950438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036802263874504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733425643637756,0.0,0.08861953760579983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18775155063337876,0.0702420607187726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5324993680267361,0.0,0.0,0.09915741965827232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5608244855135703,0.0,0.08407882345059728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05385441644162767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976724941926704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816727373117686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333830240278407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05947521902755274
mentalhealth,antixillem,2020/02/20,"How do I die painlessly? My life is nothing more but pain, loneliness, and sadness. I have no will to live and I have nothing that makes me happy anymore. My parents don't care about me, I have no true friends, I'm a piece of crap. Don't give me your ""it'll get better"" since we all know it doesn't, everyday it gets worse. If you have no real answer then don't post because I'm not here for sympathy. Google tells me nothing, I'm not looking for a crisis line.",2.015798969072165,3.4599013402061867,3.4933891752577324,91.61266108247423,76.83505154639175,6.499484536082474,25.527061855670105,7.1686216300943375,0.9915783505154634,358,13,80,4,8,118,66,97,0.26,0.528,0.213,-0.5926,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,2,0,1,3,8,1,0,2,0,12,3,1,2,2,14,22,6,1,1,4,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,0,1,13,5,5,20,3,3,0,1,1,0,7,0,1,1,2,50,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19420148261537845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193704607751978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731874663484373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996522202910037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20323093576239007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15129056120719714,0.0,0.2046164321243218,0.18784902670840253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20845474079207588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076179171722405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831392787551253,0.0,0.0,0.17291323614723636,0.0,0.16444004119040154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071181548141678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5636856325454117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20836699557185456,0.0,0.21743567636848435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18754206870425744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22288678911131188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16198487890885396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17115589369279913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19955798862201551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lalexandra12,2020/02/20,"I’m a therapist - concerned about working with others in a VERY small town that know about my past substance hospitalization. How to handle directly working w them, daily, as my new coworkers, one of them would have been my supervisor. No idea how to handle this. To anyone that works in mental health/social work...I am a therapist living and working in a very small community. I lost my former potential job during the hiring process due to substance issues. Now, I’m currently employed the ONLY other mental health agency I can work for here. The company I had applied to and didn’t work for is falling to pieces, and the two people (one would have been my supervisor, one my coworker) will now be working by my side, again because there is nowhere else to even apply to work. The individual that would have been my coworker actually evaluated me at our local hospital (post meeting me during my interview there) when I was a mess at the time. It was a huge mistake, I’ve been sober since, and literally no one else knows. Less than 10 people work in my current company, and I’ll be alone with them most of the time so I can’t imagine avoiding the topic. I do trust their abilities as therapists, for example regarding confidentiality. Issue - my “possible former” supervisor never saw me as a client but clearly knows why I lost the job, so confidentiality does not apply there, I think. I’m at a loss with how to handle this. ANY advice is appreciated.",7.1732777777777805,7.620348874074075,8.123101851851853,66.88020833333337,63.96296296296296,11.046296296296296,34.65277777777778,10.820120047756994,3.956833333333334,1156,48,196,29,16,392,147,270,0.07400000000000001,0.875,0.051,-0.2638,5,2,0,0,0,0,37.0,1,0,4,12,16,7,0,1,17,0,24,1,0,3,2,27,34,15,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,8,8,0,1,6,0,0,1,6,6,0,5,11,1,27,1,31,17,3,29,0,3,1,0,7,13,0,1,14,139,35,14,0.0,0.0,0.08700187864036897,0.0,0.0,0.0871206928242737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233711851142157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060628080535607365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06233886160725286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05434772279732697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780196565207554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895419921634434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058885670766222226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895340141569065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064451764971552,0.0,0.18610815720299054,0.17694406185318567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14699085584122631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872500922834079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946452190419385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17969342449447664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876140497444141,0.08610591953084848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416534398564576,0.0678059736578809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851080067700525,0.12361693456904453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050824219547076,0.08538531473017466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374947905140465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.310545550252269,0.0,0.057126569116316486,0.0,0.0,0.10397334888056976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709093912217028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471235099648804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044802045372611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6490549853307995,0.0,0.0,0.1899982814778912,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lookingforalaska44,2020/02/20,Distance ifucking hate distance. I think most people do hate distance when there is someone across the States that you love. What sucks more then anything is I feel so useless and out of place. Like when I come out her I have so much anxiety and I guess like having mental illness and adjustment disorder doesn't help me out. Like I have a loving family and boyfriend but when im out here I constantly feel like they don't love me Even though in reality they do. I get anxious and upset about every little thing. Don't get me started about time difference and all that shit.,3.1768058968058988,5.6870449279279285,3.5472563472563468,87.6035380835381,77.1981981981982,6.55888615888616,25.406224406224407,7.686295010490155,1.455893693693694,461,17,87,7,11,143,71,111,0.21,0.636,0.154,-0.6157,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,2,0,11,13,4,1,2,0,10,5,1,0,1,19,24,14,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,11,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,0,2,15,7,9,24,4,17,0,1,0,3,8,8,2,2,11,61,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12417331323407405,0.1833738579639632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13357440803777884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398231333429238,0.0,0.1754087821480828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16958842819745007,0.1860312209509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720992906036272,0.0,0.13676045265439554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301956523945293,0.0,0.16414636027692298,0.1159604669061165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16960957704892826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17881227892964918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205120987668025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879876103921372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17533198228114033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172027485771052,0.16268591719130365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4394967224655869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635790086279968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932287502307858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253130526797768,0.0,0.16958842819745007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16661774858712505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375320546240345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11488996691670784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783729005799893,0.10400722863014973,0.1594772369915342,0.0,0.0946493027302689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dancer082015,2020/02/20,"I use to self harm...... but still have my blade that I used but haven’t used it for a while but can’t bring myself to throw it out. I used to self harm, but I couldn’t bring myself to throw out my blade. I don’t have thoughts about hurting myself anymore as I went through therapy and got my help from my doctor. My boyfriend has helped a lot too.(he doesn’t know I have it tho) any advice as to what I should do?",2.8685767790262204,3.2795194719101133,3.188258426966293,98.6241104868914,73.38202247191012,6.3827715355805275,22.698501872659172,5.46131890053228,-0.13340599250936291,319,7,81,1,6,98,49,89,0.1,0.857,0.043,-0.6956,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,11,1,0,4,0,16,21,9,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,5,5,3,0,0,3,0,16,0,13,16,1,9,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,2,56,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854025906642456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290233449012501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18816181792849165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941973549744347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517449292191909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543449043021141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031105798272356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427100073644384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130220974721482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3958608833938164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15151913837020445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21697352801658384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506249391983258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6554654403996567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17588220896338286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TroubledNext,2020/02/20,Never happy. I don’t want to talk to a therapist because I don’t want to be judged. Even now it feels weird trying to explain what I’m feeling. For years I’ve been constantly depressed or irritable. Why is my happiness so fleeting?,2.112391304347824,4.630414152173916,4.158869565217394,81.63178260869569,81.3913043478261,7.1582608695652175,28.76521739130435,8.238735603445708,2.466500869565217,185,9,34,4,5,63,37,46,0.273,0.624,0.10300000000000001,-0.7537,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,1,7,11,2,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,2,3,2,5,9,0,4,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16325059340226358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894005606150327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306588546292947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17688175696570144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708191009897953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5701638397108724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20654665158855606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152503954004371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109406291420477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18182107032793127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31591501238270764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241651101483762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724567428735624
mentalhealth,maxxh1122,2020/02/20,"I just need someone to talk to I just need someone

Hi my name is Maxx and I’m 18 and a male. I’m in high school right now and well it’s been easier for me. School isnt a problem for me, I actually do quite well and don’t tend to need help with anything. It’s just that a lot has been happening in my life lately and I don’t know what to do and figured someone here might be able to help. Now to what is wrong, I used to live in Florida and I was doing good out there and was fairly happy had doing well mentally out there, but I had to move from Florida back to Illinois, where I was raised. I lived with my mom and she got sick and we lost our house and a lot of stuff happened and I had to move back to Illinois. When I moved back I was 17 and I’ve been having mental health problems since. I even tried to kill myself once by cutting my vein, but I guess I didn’t cut deep enough and I happened to be in my car so I was driving on the highway and drove into a ditch going 120mph and didn’t have a seatbelt on. I though that would kill me but I ended up just braking my back and was fine otherwise. I convinced my family the large cut on my arm was from the glass from the window. I’ve had no prior mental health history so they believed me and besides I hadn’t talked to them often when I lived in Florida so no one knew if I had problems. They made me see a therapist once to make sure and I lied about it all and said it was just an accident. Recently my sister and stepmom got into a fight and my stepmom left for a week and I was worried we lose our house like I did in Florida and I stressed out quite a lot from that. She didn’t tell us where she was and really I didn’t care because she is a bitch as is, but she finally came home. A lot else has happened too but all this is just the recent things. My grandma had also went to the hospital at the same time and I was worried for her and I had to watch her house while she was in the hospital. She is fine now it was just stressful then. I live in a lower-middle class house hold and I work to get money for myself and to pay my medical bills from my car crash. The bills add up to over $5k and I’m only 18 and I’ve been paying them since it’s happened. The problem is my boss hates me for whatever reason. It’s not like I’m a bad worker or I have a bad attitude towards her, I work in retail and do my job (in my opinion) well. I recently was sick, as it’s that time of year, and it was around the holidays and I still went to work for 4 days in a row while still attending school. My other managers I was working will all said I was really sick and should take a day off and I did. My manager got mad at me and cut my hours down to 4 hours a week. Then the other week i had a few drinks because I was stressed and sprained my foot like an idiot. It happened on a Thursday and I had work Friday and Saturday. I called off Friday because I couldn’t walk and I gave plenty of time to find someone else to work and even went in on Saturday. My job we aren’t allowed to sit down unless we are on break so it’s a lot of walking and I worked open to close Saturday. My boss has taken me off the schedule for 3 weeks since it’s happened and I’ve been looking for another job and the stress has just kept on pilling up. Then this morning came around and I’ve been having problems with my stomach lately and was violently getting sick at 4 in the morning. My dad didn’t believe me and just told me to go to school and ignored the rest I had to say. Then my grandma came to take me to school and I said I was sick and wasn’t going. I’ve been sick for a couple weeks and haven’t been able to keep down food unless I smoke thc before eating. My dad is fine with me smoking and it helps with my stress and my back, along with my stomach. So my grandma and I started to argue and I felt bad because she got out of the hospital a couple days ago. I just didn’t want to go to school and I said some things about my dad and him not caring, because he hasn’t shown it or even acted like it at all. I understand he is stressed too but I mean he just doesn’t ever listen and if he does he just yells at me. He is a good father, don’t get me wrong, but lately he’s only been making it harder for me and hasn’t even seemed to care the least about me. My moms family had disowned me when I moved to Florida with her, except for a few people, it’s a large family. I just want help and I hate talking to therapists because I was forced to see one when my parents got a divorce and I just don’t like them. I’ve seen 4 different ones for various reasons, none really related to any of my problems, and I just don’t like them. I don’t like telling them about my problems. So I came here. Please help.",1.4349348475251134,2.8068075817120643,3.2364519048049982,93.14929101438786,78.24124513618678,6.376726088136821,22.26477241878564,7.073560746590762,0.4812302597050038,3686,106,865,41,86,1234,337,1028,0.158,0.747,0.095,-0.9977,8,0,2,0,2,2,65.0,7,0,7,12,61,57,14,6,47,0,94,19,5,9,6,176,165,96,2,17,31,8,1,7,0,4,11,7,2,1,30,90,3,5,10,2,6,23,26,35,4,3,77,13,145,22,126,81,18,128,0,2,5,0,67,52,1,15,58,602,175,24,0.07791500785384509,0.0,0.03801690414517405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034533476669935184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031154301815401457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026492438580040103,0.04085033963471986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03205870633739872,0.0693608759308552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14977957908298575,0.09758366556886257,0.14248879682024124,0.0,0.033149966486066,0.08778353255612513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03977996721944687,0.17822802437973728,0.11915931490508955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862114742231453,0.0,0.07537310147693063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04070229992159422,0.0,0.0,0.0340919742164361,0.0,0.0,0.0381635225717402,0.0,0.03986325226875917,0.06508799122644908,0.0,0.03450478527947374,0.04025351555373687,0.0,0.10292425570704912,0.03523929266109292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101770027197259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03740531312228262,0.04267604132419558,0.03560645281451605,0.0,0.04710756838591732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06106106367041636,0.0,0.08856178903080153,0.06535141193529592,0.15578937363036066,0.0,0.042916082683333565,0.0,0.24114994444411575,0.04147098734205101,0.0,0.07692493946177265,0.0,0.08282000987861217,0.0,0.0,0.1305619684663874,0.04116074181418074,0.03907755283941832,0.0,0.07673058795289607,0.1798069159882738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159779342180038,0.03462721947943002,0.08620141212146533,0.0,0.021410025331491698,0.0,0.13183728389700078,0.0,0.04232744200471943,0.0,0.02751683713385128,0.1332286801941339,0.0,0.13760075880812414,0.0,0.032714491600532226,0.043583481950648914,0.04252671752768488,0.1656013835257278,0.0,0.0368625321686922,0.052008872762392994,0.0,0.0,0.04243614256004298,0.0,0.03924558666909304,0.11778000316687676,0.0413277552631686,0.0,0.09125311551452484,0.0,0.1656226454450768,0.0,0.08665948659921961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297694049357529,0.07919583866702673,0.059257874457569824,0.0,0.0,0.04325769780108783,0.0,0.0,0.027008228015728327,0.0,0.0,0.042763640592895114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609394895256578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287220160045275,0.0,0.0,0.07487152373846002,0.08010960479998608,0.11539750577862998,0.0,0.0,0.03326949549340677,0.14823002965254742,0.03098057076240187,0.0,0.23656244289550402,0.062088173569441386,0.035465448433548825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667814947226347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320342666216114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027574321792648068,0.0,0.062223025918999364,0.0,0.267754134747741,0.0,0.0445970214951724,0.0,0.0,0.03671698640800334,0.0,0.05858238926372281,0.09393769791731796,0.06810115110724622,0.0,0.0,0.09046532941701983,0.051763269101855136,0.0,0.03827554981015023,0.0,0.06814930148320869,0.0,0.0,0.037225564489328206,0.0,0.02644958792866086,0.0,0.0,0.040556135498093934,0.04686108051314521,0.03364677519098831,0.0,0.0,0.04595629034044242,0.0,0.15624679884882586,0.0,0.1401098985537591,0.10834198931636252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19853068788302425,0.07912647256006362,0.0,0.027674293044293103,0.08518782978533469,0.0,0.025087355256999733
mentalhealth,FaekNaem247,2020/02/20,Damn Can't talk normal to girls I like. Totally fuck it up every time. I'm fuckin 28. God damn it.,-2.6231818181818163,-1.135362863636363,0.5004545454545449,101.2706818181818,109.45454545454544,4.0181818181818185,10.045454545454547,5.985473137389443,-1.3103999999999996,75,1,19,1,4,26,19,22,0.331,0.504,0.166,-0.6801,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,3,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,1,4,0,2,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4351301960487816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4774483827568381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523106853930334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5060099480229203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41510179934875785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011453154295968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kitkatkk91,2020/02/20,"My mental health is now affecting my job I’m at a loss. I’ve had depression and anxiety for 11 years now. I’ve been on and off every type of medication with little to no help. As I’ve gotten older, I would say my anxiety has ramped up more (thank you adulthood) and I have been able to manage my depression to an acceptable level. Right now I’m not on any medications. The last couple of weeks at my job have been pretty stressful- we are short staffed, and I took on a project that I originally thought wouldn’t be as difficult as it has turned out to be. I’ve now (for the first time in 11 years) been experiencing what I’m assuming to be physical symptoms of anxiety (heart racing, heart feeling like it’s pounding out of my chest, can’t catch my breath, nausea) for the last couple of weeks. My supervisor took me aside  today and brought up that she has been receiving news that I’ve been negative lately and it’s bringing down everyone at my job and they are worried about me. It took me by surprise because I think I’ve always been pretty good at my job with not being extremely negative because I know how annoying those people can be. I voice when I’m stressed but I typically make a joke out of it and people never reciprocated negatively. I’m just confused and disappointed in myself. I made a doctors appointment for myself in 2 days to make sure everything with my heart is okay and it’s just anxiety and then to discuss going on anxiety meds (again, for the 15th time). I’m trying to think positively about it but I’ve tried SO many different anxiety medications and none have helped. I’m not good at faking being happy so I’m pretty worried about what might happen if these medications don’t help. I wish I didn’t have to work and I could take a couple of weeks off. If you’ve read this far, thanks for listening to me vent, and if you’ve been in a similar situation I would love to hear your story. Mental illness sucks.",4.606970486111108,5.745429158854173,5.935833333333331,77.83694444444444,69.91145833333334,9.543055555555554,29.065972222222207,9.816601858774405,2.737955555555556,1543,57,300,37,27,520,186,384,0.11900000000000001,0.7340000000000001,0.146,0.9575,5,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,1,2,1,3,14,23,2,3,11,1,35,14,5,6,2,54,68,27,0,8,10,0,1,1,0,4,8,4,0,0,15,21,0,0,7,2,0,8,13,11,0,1,17,6,35,12,55,40,2,57,0,4,0,1,14,26,1,6,24,193,50,10,0.07472316879148251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06217566238276029,0.0,0.0,0.050814317144848416,0.0,0.34297811759506264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110110027981988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059660370000415776,0.24803929503117106,0.0,0.048190262176987284,0.0,0.12871791157434415,0.0,0.0,0.07806980737133397,0.0,0.07648232954985204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295749249066769,0.07140118997131095,0.06715636593204666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037782279320982735,0.0533822467150302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06355948920168655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04246689882030006,0.1253484975311296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607745138525338,0.07954420265021088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942723421244424,0.0842184419424905,0.2656419443878116,0.1502560948323995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966048602058181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04106589938811177,0.12181871146708688,0.0842909891089318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03650596585847217,0.07489224560986192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744057722160256,0.07070486904113704,0.09975659080645892,0.07575756488946299,0.0,0.0,0.0830005953947574,0.30110292512542425,0.15060675812989824,0.07926947368331498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05763111430922725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360727343126462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22806097837509345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474338994217017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06381317786746825,0.0,0.05942286299137374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399197249967033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17119027477481832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042570227359365,0.07766598336468103,0.05618252351809864,0.0,0.0,0.13759010889771214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09575917874453384,0.0,0.05932184936148775,0.08714336126023807,0.0,0.07082882686352977,0.0,0.2490605698478412,0.10146425330359247,0.08127735034706085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798152563174021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592795640937588,0.0,0.0,0.054399356828844364,0.15177001011335864,0.0,0.10616239039404078,0.0,0.0,0.09623854161278457
mentalhealth,ao--ren22,2020/02/20,"How to enter therapy? Hi guys, this has probably been answered before but I just haven't found the post. 

I'm feeling motivated to finally start therapy as I've been on the fence about it for about a year. I'm just so intimidated by the process. Where do I even begin? Do I need a referral from a doctor? I'm scared to call places and ask because I don't want to come off stupid (I'm sure they won't see that way but I have a really hard time asking for help - one of the many reasons why I'm seeking therapy along with childhood traumas that are bubbling to the surface more and more each passing day) 

I don't know anyone that has gone to therapy - or maybe I do know someone but they just haven't shared - so I don't know who to ask for advice. Any time I bring it up to my mom she suggests ""holistic"" coaches and basically people who aren't trained to deal with what I'm dealing with. To give you more of an idea of what's going on in case that can get me some more specific answers, I'm feeling very depressed. I have for a while. But it's gotten to an almost debilitating state and I feel so directionless and hopeless that I can't make a move at all in any area of my life. Any articles I find just feel like fluff pieces that don't actually offer a step by step on how to get an appointment. They tell me to ""start calling places!"" but for someone like me that's hard. What places do I call? What do I tell them? Ugh... Any advice would be greatly appreciated. 

Thank you in advance.",2.1593219930027767,3.948152211726384,3.7962359753890698,88.09733140306429,77.37133550488599,6.893425021112317,25.051152129328017,7.793537801064563,1.240230160453614,1167,42,253,18,27,389,158,307,0.11699999999999999,0.79,0.09300000000000001,-0.8522,0,0,0,0,0,1,32.0,0,2,4,2,13,12,1,1,15,0,24,2,0,5,2,46,58,18,0,3,10,1,6,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,17,11,0,1,14,1,0,10,9,6,0,1,5,7,27,6,41,50,8,38,0,2,1,0,27,15,0,3,12,156,44,2,0.0,0.0,0.08985575585667575,0.0,0.0,0.17995693488048528,0.0,0.0,0.09220375041426032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504673272716497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438373074814623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582441172474081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05613046278263897,0.0,0.0783523898698904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820686562593971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931784737212749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059383294149086815,0.1898586730669194,0.0793074498868942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424668942837024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060817266690274915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18623150032267727,0.06578120798295979,0.0,0.10086797008806693,0.08415847641895753,0.0,0.0,0.10095979712241628,0.0,0.0,0.09621488392928244,0.08833050265482206,0.05233057946403236,0.0,0.0,0.10151734846745852,0.0,0.0911726200906576,0.0,0.0,0.16496927526735894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061718567708107075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394590723296801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518125201667144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503807332668145,0.08997023094866675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146340264152909,0.0933535854884357,0.09250566423666416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078417332132376,0.0,0.09786533338314164,0.0,0.06827536193538983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0623950678795815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383593817727484,0.0,0.2886086602891545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818616464426561,0.0,0.09927666325980243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05898812216069053,0.09467247863206264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921870750218505,0.0,0.0733749879335038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603636188998826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303478851119509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678330444456356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16096209160229832,0.08477391011766983,0.4212011376127919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738393237727704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759747628371754,0.05431054024205045,0.07308797092666172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830869148805798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541023197991695,0.0,0.0,0.05929581378995105
mentalhealth,PurpleSkyes,2020/02/20,"Does anyone use Lemonaid? I was looking into getting some consultations and such, but there are not a lot of great (or affordable) resources locally where I am. Has anyone had any luck or experience with Lemonaid? I was looking at that or Brightside, but I can't find much information about it online. I live in Colorado in the US.",4.977049180327867,7.124842114754102,5.804065573770496,75.17986885245901,70.47540983606558,8.158688524590165,33.511475409836066,8.841846274778883,3.1563154098360653,263,13,44,5,5,86,49,61,0.079,0.855,0.066,-0.2025,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,1,0,15,11,6,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,6,2,7,8,3,6,0,0,2,0,3,6,0,6,0,37,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849376479161101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3803123020740293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379882661747335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660226236909689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485604945070552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420844349019977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29982960017599025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401398479094627,0.0,0.4567447508537065,0.0,0.0,0.23120506833203275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999170514250504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32712647356812025,0.2348804337125724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gingersiany1234,2020/02/20,"Insomina help! (Medication advice) I’ve recently been through a bad time and was prescribed fluoxetine 20mg - took it for 6 days but by day 4 the side effects became unbearable so I stopped the meds with doctors advice and took some daily doses of diazapam to help me relax and sleep (anywhere between 2mg-6mg a day) after about 2/3 days of this this stopped working and I would wake up in the night randomly anxious and covered in sweat. Since then I’ve been to see a psychiatrist and he prescribed me quetapine starting at 50mg.
I took it for one night and one night only - it helped me sleep more but still my sleep was disturbed. Does anyone know if it’s okay to just stop taking quetapine after just one dose? I’ve tried looking online and can’t find any information. It’s 2.40am hère, i went to sleep around 11 and woke up at 1am keep averaging 2 - 4 hours (if I’m lucky) sleep a night and it’s becoming excruciating! Anyone have any advice? Thank you :)",2.683672952434563,5.152608524064171,3.9607205178722213,84.19606529693219,78.73262032085563,6.9314945116802695,25.35012665353223,8.032893268588372,1.6601187165775408,762,29,147,14,19,249,116,187,0.125,0.778,0.09699999999999999,-0.7556,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,2,6,6,0,1,7,1,7,11,7,1,0,30,20,16,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,8,12,0,4,4,1,0,4,1,2,0,3,9,2,9,4,22,10,2,31,0,0,2,0,6,8,0,5,19,77,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881199975894578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336702135202001,0.0,0.0,0.11103064614563224,0.0,0.13744207086935145,0.0,0.0,0.08749178626586332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206133593719879,0.0,0.10854470925322482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535349482875169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059575623449547,0.08600721030395367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982793592280333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976289893034062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678793860563692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735752670412035,0.0,0.0,0.054013197933571566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253209805953084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091691075676075,0.09900874043614076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689238672084697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997952101039986,0.07474786350419632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704158408901396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831800188034929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129985746468615,0.0,0.4917647177113942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695644810228035,0.0,0.07848810459007771,0.2465043717546584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389580670109692,0.0,0.0,0.0904848292175138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057309004435302575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275846397396565,0.0667270031647659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110836664687977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155044140360327,0.0,0.0,0.06981668843120986,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,royalkatejoanne,2020/02/20,"I'm paranoid and its seemingly getting worse I have been paranoid for a very long time. Im terrified people are after me and trying to kill me. I'm not going to get too much into my history but I use to also suffer with severe depression and anxiety but my depression is mostly gone with the help of therapy. I am 21f living for the first time on my own for university and I struggled a little bit last semester but this semester has been relatively smooth and with just adopting my dog, I really felt I could comfortably live in our family vacation home by myself. I stopped triple and quadruple checking the locks, I didn't always lock my bedroom door, I opened 2 blinds from the windows and even turned the kitchen light off at night. But last night I woke up and it sounded like someone was in my house. My heart was pounding out of my chest and I texted my mom over 200 miles away to call the police because "" what if they heard me? They would sure kill me then!"" The police showed up at 4am not more than 5 minutes after I had texted my mom and they couldn't get inside because well the doors were locked. How is there supposedto be an intruderinmy home if the cops cant get inside. I left my room to open the back door which is less than a foot away to let them in. They searched my house and got nothing but were reassuring me that's this is okay and that I can call at any time. I feel ridiculous that I thought someone was in my house and that I heard voices inside. I feel like I hallucinated the voices and my paranoia because they didn't find anything to justify that I heard voices. I barricaded my door before laying in bed tonight. I'm so scared that even though no one was in my house yesterday. They're going to come back today. I feel like I haven't progressed at all. I feel like I lost all that progress and I need someone to live with me again. 

Tl;Dr
I thought there were people in my house last night but I also think I am hallucinating the voices because the cops found nothing and I'm terrified.",3.82818858560794,5.340523977667495,4.588684863523572,85.31841191067,72.25062034739454,7.582133995037223,26.39950372208437,8.155646560271837,1.559890322580645,1605,54,324,24,31,516,201,403,0.159,0.765,0.076,-0.9888,1,0,0,0,0,2,26.0,1,0,6,4,15,18,3,2,17,1,29,5,3,2,3,58,60,30,2,6,11,2,6,4,0,1,1,8,11,0,13,25,1,1,11,1,1,4,8,9,1,2,23,16,60,9,44,32,9,51,0,4,1,0,16,26,0,4,25,216,73,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250408339402173,0.06505191800415268,0.0,0.0,0.053164995203335993,0.0,0.0598073896011521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433537492230282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14690513024227472,0.1202309946582889,0.0,0.19063090213685105,0.0,0.06652531453070107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535217396801424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159660784719468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673450389080813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062420267812708735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346724217886535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327413885362136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370102735056584,0.0,0.15812037329127349,0.16755515276085553,0.07506493925492101,0.0,0.07145498846292653,0.06649976086270659,0.0,0.08572019653360331,0.0,0.0,0.1633830295810826,0.0,0.08886284806882226,0.0,0.06252758708312388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264352707869744,0.05240232156267649,0.0,0.15684157598319806,0.0,0.0,0.4510453896666515,0.0,0.0,0.08444767962390957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729888944769068,0.0,0.0,0.1911810954488297,0.0,0.0,0.08494266182222415,0.0799442179852855,0.0,0.15277894961975955,0.0783567723101644,0.20710278311792465,0.06918672828840282,0.0,0.0,0.0853425677119969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18312664702276094,0.0,0.0,0.05747120286129698,0.05796938593694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22009954701954335,0.0,0.15003139519873576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052976705914731914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840016169660042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050084029176796885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782716924356467,0.0,0.0,0.07117202103374393,0.0,0.08832100457240291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19872466054057367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536187530394116,0.0,0.08173057894644148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368360599817217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940549933100365,0.0,0.0,0.0500945064765538,0.07681132923697069,0.1241321743148232,0.1367619396575762,0.0,0.07410537919310081,0.0,0.0,0.053079002565544105,0.08503725296600638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752230966704427,0.0,0.06450658368597867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07029309572659223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967197067135395,0.05553673937981931,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Backpk,2020/02/20,"feeling a little suicidal again because my abuse is never taken seriously this is more of a vent however   


in my country when ever a major case of domestic violence comes across headlines the same exact thing inevitably happens the conversation turns to all men are abusive all men deserve to die should all men be monitored men deserve harsher punishments for anything they do all men will commit rape men men men men men  


honestly i am so mentally fucking exhausted of this because and i'm sorry if this offends anyone but women simply cannot know what it is like to be a man who has been raped and physically abused you honestly cant because you are not taken seriously and when ever you try to say ""hey i was abused domestic violence happens to men too"" you are just dismissed as ""oh well hes an MRA don't pay attention to him""   


i get laughed at told i deserved it (usually in the context of well a woman just got her own back) told i'm making it up i am so fucking sick of it  my mother beat me i was in two abusive relationships one was manipulative the other one was was violent and actually drugged me once when i had flu and didn't want to have sex   


i am sick of being told daily that i am this born asshole who deserves everything bad that ever happens to me because of whats between my legs i can't actually date anymore for fuck sake i have a phobia of women showing interest in me now i get panic attacks i need to carry around beta blockers    


i tried getting this but was told its still a taboo subject and that they don't have resources for things like this so they instead focused on my combat PTSD thinking it would fix the romance phobia but it never did   


i don't know how to end this but just every time this kind of thing happens in the media the resulting conversations cuts me down and each time it gets worse and worse and i feel like at some point there's going to be a stage that i cannot mentally handle it anymore",6.3312727272727285,6.241711049350653,7.233961038961041,74.36808441558445,65.77922077922078,9.90909090909091,35.422077922077925,9.573946990214177,3.3536233766233767,1554,69,286,28,22,522,201,385,0.244,0.6579999999999999,0.099,-0.9971,1,0,1,0,5,0,6.0,0,4,3,1,23,26,10,1,16,0,40,12,1,4,11,50,71,22,2,5,9,1,2,3,0,3,5,1,0,15,29,12,0,2,6,1,1,2,11,15,2,3,17,3,37,11,37,47,10,35,0,0,0,6,37,14,3,2,21,209,66,1,0.0,0.4815108956357335,0.15863291982321118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612136125724382,0.05683208104097821,0.0,0.06688559084974856,0.07235543318039869,0.0,0.09246645706165144,0.0,0.06249843982322726,0.0678644677690722,0.198187397509418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001455612260371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08435464266156315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425769367194234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198896069829906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205641942589682,0.06848095990124978,0.0,0.07304821428820171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219408533596116,0.058065646392643284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22542303787270665,0.16985943552128596,0.0,0.046192659208504586,0.0,0.06500614337780172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28749857211108426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463944348232277,0.08933749099752987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912626211158267,0.08146278807536275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05425428193407743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381998323519004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06026725785420435,0.1253745621669907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865593519808189,0.11015334194164607,0.0,0.0,0.0953632503427585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683481098022768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950106583837768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726309676395674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06463622575713175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098504906551368,0.0,0.0,0.06490941663788274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890589999096289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199422405356995,0.05208022286428489,0.0,0.0,0.09478873430365868,0.0,0.0,0.31066180267911153,0.0,0.11036604519983917,0.08840807900381285,0.07939765312541769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951720067522717,0.0,0.04794038786738666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461589443135794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16566024023184794,0.057738182637060965,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HoboSnobo,2020/02/20,"Anyone. Please. Help. I need some coping skills or something. FUCK FUCK FUCK

I feel like I’m going fucking INSANE. I can’t stop moving. I feel like my head is filling to the brim and I can’t stop it. My GOD this is fucking TERRIBLE. HOW DO I STOP THIS?!?!?

Someone. Please. Anyone. Help me slow my mind and my body. I don’t know how much longer I can take this.",-1.9418500000000023,-0.7100994266666658,0.08345833333333452,102.8131875,116.6,2.408333333333333,12.6875,4.557286568694721,-1.54245,273,6,63,1,16,88,45,75,0.31,0.503,0.187,-0.9403,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,2,8,5,0,1,0,7,7,2,2,0,14,19,5,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,3,3,0,0,3,3,6,0,0,0,2,13,2,1,19,2,7,0,0,0,5,2,0,5,2,6,33,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012700700892372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15986716289074435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554463793575784,0.20563872561339908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6652772782748969,0.0,0.0,0.08179534856202356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477075869445552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929385002091651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909688834772932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062803194659854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532225208908572,0.0,0.0,0.15296847728801904,0.10580072938193087,0.10671785187362423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159707522945732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194637189058727,0.11079975734789033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3609808253509589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082129663788926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FlamboyantHuman,2020/02/20,"Anxiety/Addiction problem So I'm 13 year old boy. I am part of a ""faction"" on a video game platform. I am really invested in it, I feel that its partly due to the fun involved, but we also win money. I wanted to also mention that I'm one of the founders, and I find myself not obligated, but wanting to be able to participate due to it. I feel that if I dont participate I'm letting others down.

Since I was about 11, I get anxious and nervous about alot of things. For example in the video game we can get ""raided"" by enemy factions and I'm usually up until 11pm trying to see if they succeed or not. 

I also get nervous about other stuff, such as normal teenager stuff, school assignments etc. When I do feel this anxiety I feel empty in a sense. I feel no emotions other than nervousness. When I say empty I mean nothing els, just this anxiety for whatever it is I'm focused on.

Now I'm wondering how I can be more calm, and hopefully not have anxiety. I dont want to let the game down, because I enjoy it, but I need to find a way to make it not become so ""real"". Would meditation help, anything els? 

Thanks",2.1098017621145395,3.8943771057268752,4.743107929515418,81.27245925110134,77.5022026431718,7.888017621145375,27.20903083700441,8.697196308434329,2.2359358590308367,861,36,171,19,20,306,127,227,0.13699999999999998,0.72,0.14300000000000002,0.8133,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,2,0,1,3,14,11,0,3,9,0,15,0,0,3,0,39,39,20,0,10,11,0,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,17,6,0,0,9,5,2,0,7,4,0,1,1,7,23,7,29,33,5,19,0,0,1,0,11,9,0,6,9,124,40,3,0.11741192758181405,0.0,0.0,0.12799633171560065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816828282022469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694594096885291,0.13264205819096708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662001225525244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157322127576206,0.1296722494274544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27521180937495626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207261531613124,0.0,0.0,0.13094533569511366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29683499209529995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146247494267268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18402865848869088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869874012087677,0.0,0.0,0.11661653649234192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401233017077559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837337337942031,0.0,0.0,0.12789600962262926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705945658078272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11503876011752645,0.11265991113194868,0.0,0.123204067185008,0.0,0.07956136077400643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542913517245751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234735786861673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364047833031914,0.07521708731314135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337067738276264,0.0,0.11882713903644618,0.09356210490919688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712435979705814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688171330472313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809712812737086,0.0,0.0,0.0780032675423139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971499170670998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293126503991832,0.0,0.20775779077770687,0.09319612303906402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732822700496932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340606464134727,0.0,0.0,0.07560943186143135
mentalhealth,folelsee,2020/02/20,"How do you quiet your mind? My mind just seems to always be massively active. Everything that I do, everyday, everything I see or hear, it’s just always analysing literally everything. It’s not always necessarily bad nor good thoughts, but it’s always just thinking about something, analysing, scrutinising. It’s fairly manageable most of the time but sometimes I feel burned out and stressed beyond measure. I just never seem to be able to have peace. The constant introspection is so consuming. Unusually, the only thing it doesn’t really affect is sleep. Is there a way to focus it? I have tried, with a good degree of dedication, meditating, playing soothing music, reading, etc. and to no avail. It always has something to say about something. I can’t think of any obvious trauma that has rendered it in such a damaged state, and I would not say my life is any more stressful than the average person. Is there anything that can be done about this? How do I turn it off, even if only for a little?",4.775963114754099,7.188075322404371,5.5711714480874335,75.49151127049183,71.73224043715848,8.290846994535519,30.016734972677607,9.017664075816787,2.868060382513661,796,34,133,17,16,259,113,183,0.126,0.802,0.07200000000000001,-0.9088,0,0,3,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,0,0,15,8,0,2,8,0,20,2,1,3,2,30,29,11,0,2,10,0,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,1,14,5,0,0,6,2,0,0,7,5,0,0,2,6,12,3,19,23,3,11,0,1,1,0,6,5,0,5,4,99,26,2,0.11738275733321475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4883592871893409,0.0,0.0,0.15964860042569978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659600762612147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800969929218496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12684905968868435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12012331517474532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091280315711842,0.07753020415543775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164881602216218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059352249064900275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969101753278005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322988986334805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291091292500094,0.0,0.11764836040470505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237046245687752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09053281887282456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785497528430719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024940960393467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741452277441003,0.0,0.07519840010494172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18669496006053687,0.0,0.0,0.09353885999774808,0.2137217073762232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746752975673093,0.0,0.0,0.2711009441932936,0.11609454847188255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689231038605178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798388812531062,0.1504282623822402,0.0,0.09318879754134264,0.06844682976812665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969518702269647,0.1276787326712411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317296905348918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338534293367765,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anoymous420,2020/02/20,"I doing a 10 page clinical brief on dissociative identity disorder and i need to pick 2 perspectives (psychodynamic, behavioral, cognitive, sociocultural, or biological) to explain the causes of it. which ones should i do? i’m thinking psychodynamic and cognitive, but i’m not 100% sure.",9.652695035460994,11.334591574468085,11.609361702127659,39.73333333333335,58.787234042553216,16.479432624113475,45.45390070921986,14.554592549557764,8.39148794326241,232,14,31,12,3,84,38,47,0.102,0.898,0.0,-0.5095,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,2,1,12,8,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,4,7,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,20,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4750284701545433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5299686414339789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34287550355539925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31334495654274364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43582147890757056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.296297413814114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GioVaz787,2020/02/20,"My life feels mellow, boring, and I only feel happy when I’m on drugs or drunk. Am I alright? For reference I am a 15 year old male. 

I definitely wouldn’t nearly describe myself as depressed, because I do my best in school, even if I cheat half the time, I get out of bed every morning, etc.

But I know I’m definitely not alright either.

I know I have some sort of mental illness or at least a very bad mental state because... nothing excites me anymore. Or at least, it does, for a second. Like when I went to San Juan, Puerto Rico for a trip, I was looking forward to going there all my life but when I got there everything was just so... underwhelming. There are few things I get excited by, and if I get excited by it, it lasts for like 5 seconds then I’m like, meh. 

I’m also lost in my own thoughts 24/7, and I sometimes feel “disconnected”, and have to touch something and feel myself to get reassurance that I know I am real.

I also get very annoyed with parents, I don’t have any “true” friends, just social, and no one in this entire world knows what’s going on inside me, which is why I like my own company and will get drunk and high on any drug when I get a chance.

Which also leads into the next, which is I only feel happy and curious and bubbly about the world only when I’m intoxicated on substances, never have I once felt genuine happiness while not sober. 

Anyway, that’s just a main jhist of my mental health. I could very well just be overthinking normal things, which I have a habit of doing, I even have mild social anxiety.

But please let me know If this is normal.",5.171156901688182,5.192712544025163,6.151204899040053,80.7716335650447,68.2138364779874,8.581529294935452,28.37206223104932,8.20500826718156,1.7950352201257858,1231,37,248,15,19,410,167,318,0.09,0.723,0.187,0.9873,1,0,3,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,0,3,21,23,2,0,10,2,23,9,0,1,3,53,53,31,0,7,16,1,7,4,1,2,7,0,1,1,14,13,2,0,13,2,0,6,6,6,1,4,7,8,38,17,29,41,11,35,0,2,1,0,6,16,0,8,18,174,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21641083346579432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268505213435295,0.0,0.06900661500272733,0.0,0.08945916903611434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531744741432964,0.10997632031014827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946646329203098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202139096931509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769347587171317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893904559729187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20921843550559285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060247341698522,0.11915916723897226,0.0,0.07600164365535274,0.0,0.08107048090443651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22805191374688105,0.0,0.08661099235248454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969219650814082,0.0,0.32989890241107656,0.0,0.10253121538367464,0.0,0.07214521746676464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28807485362762625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958837481025669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530658606803424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247871677238772,0.07352915382428996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224077340600792,0.12742898650645595,0.1762785205513924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574952180098765,0.0,0.09846946594259168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27271641652119016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957169416872906,0.0,0.0959340921588712,0.0,0.17676358986306775,0.086554176631392,0.0,0.09465502400714186,0.0960654324029764,0.06112527521348616,0.20581501194859686,0.0,0.0,0.100162031024524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901805490165123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267309329721183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912923246381549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18390537378538568,0.0,0.06944425315628475,0.0892150992480249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11985645166674623,0.0,0.0,0.07161273230214207,0.052599289039442214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22328583550855025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110517155995997,0.08362098344564277,0.08139602554029632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808909357889293
mentalhealth,monrose561,2020/02/20,"I’m feeling pretty down Ive been acting like a crazy person for the last two months. I think the people in my life are probably pretty sick or dealing with me. Every other day I’m crying to my boyfriend and having these weird panic attacks about death. I feel suicidal some days and perfectly normal others. I don’t want to die but I don’t have any control over my mind. I keep trying to channel it into exercise and art but it feels like I’m never going to escape. I know everyone is sick of it. I’m sick of it. I don’t know how this happened or where it came from but I’m really, really tired of hating myself for this.",1.7759743589743628,3.675807392307696,3.9750000000000014,85.85916666666667,78.92307692307693,6.487179487179486,20.06410256410256,7.492282038375204,0.7104102564102561,491,12,98,7,12,169,85,130,0.27,0.633,0.098,-0.9777,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,2,3,7,2,1,3,0,9,6,0,2,2,26,26,9,3,2,5,0,3,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,10,6,0,2,6,3,0,3,4,4,0,1,2,3,13,3,16,24,1,13,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,3,7,63,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115347242006417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18595109555785186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18694639729486226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18332615348387046,0.0,0.0,0.17954516650348645,0.21082699832554824,0.16851260410157695,0.0,0.0,0.1696381446501226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13771598829617027,0.1561861035662954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479398589870321,0.116770674513762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09289396241087594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445407236154015,0.0,0.0,0.16137574710320055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528431098412334,0.0,0.0,0.17965870925825772,0.133235803865145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545150848247455,0.15970951091011046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16504067847807946,0.0,0.13046642255213195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606483437823174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014898692955312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19177657975335136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331755356499608,0.14272063327772194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3325804103286898,0.17622970583522474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20942402926952444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787907748412341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104733919804604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878648868368399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110973685320365,0.0,0.1596695823821806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640866459785702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DipiePatara,2020/02/20,"Struggling with depression and anger issues I used to suffer from some really severe depression, I've gotten better but I have some severe anger issues. I break thing when I'm mad and today without hesitation I punched the laptop I saved up 4 years for. I need help for handling my anger in less destructive ways",4.9965517241379285,7.398260724137932,5.41331034482759,76.91272413793105,71.06896551724137,8.088275862068969,25.393103448275863,8.841846274778883,2.2100372413793106,254,8,41,5,5,81,43,58,0.445,0.415,0.14,-0.9777,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,11,5,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,10,5,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,0,0,1,0,7,2,8,4,3,7,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,25,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19888759084794416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873766658675292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15073194898451014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4694314215869919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674525599517975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406352821193752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5080995176729022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23509281819689426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14939990812755302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21315941551658485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942236342310895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849883291526605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167757561923804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448149869817522
mentalhealth,healingisbeing,2020/02/20,"My Healing Journal - New Personal Blog Hello everyone! I was diagnosed with complex-PTSD in March 2018 and have been working on my healing since. This week I've created a blog to continue to document my healing efforts and what I've been through. I'd appreciate it if you checked it out. :) The first post is me just sharing my story and intentions with creating a blog.

[https://medium.com/@healingisbeing/healing-is-being-ba453f5a3a4a](https://medium.com/@healingisbeing/healing-is-being-ba453f5a3a4a)

I cross-post between medium and Wordpress because I like the formatting options on Medium a lot better. I put content warnings on the post!",9.993473684210526,14.383270084210533,6.6223684210526335,64.5040789473684,63.94736842105264,8.431578947368422,37.92105263157895,9.120678840339163,4.402768421052633,538,27,65,11,10,149,65,95,0.023,0.784,0.193,0.938,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,0,4,1,3,0,0,6,0,5,4,0,1,0,12,5,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,10,3,11,2,1,13,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,3,6,44,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399711386728333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203075758535486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23305433483552024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194069189544906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19531035409447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121782633550434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952104143076036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22176354376704446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20049091246717152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6597229348480786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684075820593153,0.23082643882489814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899398544783387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18418325794227114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671624139558234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,just_here_cause_done,2020/02/20,"Talking I’m getting diagnosed with things/have been diagnosed with stuff. Starting a medication in a couple days to hopefully help one of them. 

But there’s one thing I have been afraid to talk about with my psychiatrist or psychologist. Partially because I don’t know what the hell it is or how to really explain it. 

But I shall try my best right now.

Basically, at certain points in time, my brain just disconnects from reality. It can last from a few minutes to an hour. 

- It feels like I’m watching a TV show instead of it being my vision. 

- All my senses are muffled (especially hearing). 

- I can’t recognize people that I know. 

- If I look in a mirror I don’t recognize the person staring back at me. 

- If I look at a body part, my hand for example, it doesn’t feel like mine. Like it doesn’t belong to me.

- I can’t remember almost anything while it’s happening and it’s hard to recall what happened after the fact

- I can’t remember who I am.

And I guess I’m wondering if I should tell my psychiatrist about this? The psychologist? Should I just let it happen? What even is this?",1.9740967544396817,4.440914586854461,4.032067768932439,82.64930189834661,81.53521126760563,7.6480097979179416,25.223310879771386,8.587818076936951,2.103041804449888,849,34,166,21,23,289,122,213,0.03,0.843,0.127,0.9542,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,1,10,8,1,1,11,0,20,6,3,1,3,31,39,11,0,6,9,0,4,3,0,3,3,1,0,1,19,5,0,0,8,2,0,0,7,2,0,2,2,9,25,6,23,32,4,17,1,0,4,0,9,8,1,9,12,122,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333521382302003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095888941666198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240075359059576,0.0,0.08118018191544117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975539643000895,0.0,0.0,0.14792364554413387,0.0,0.1486635675214396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735186169329295,0.0,0.08588467621279024,0.0,0.0,0.27033277684982776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795859732415158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346711422380838,0.1902756601652619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957667363797372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467035504718174,0.0,0.3532896643939982,0.0,0.11929561162290005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009409143307256,0.0,0.08926212800893363,0.0,0.0,0.13226946444567725,0.1311472177637899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14637527637354278,0.10855264236356713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13617700144909706,0.0,0.19518277651666016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236612369815545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134156394170181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18048106892350066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442118841695563,0.0,0.09232443163780353,0.1162803196487586,0.0,0.0,0.12589022331789812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853131481633935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017149645276718,0.11372783362597864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425955622936788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244964089768948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21407660323684724,0.11639786338806077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847330518611549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765344104626794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904147866030178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14441893835417485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cmk11t,2020/02/20,"Help I am 20 and need help/advice for my mum Hello there,

I am in a desperate suitation so what better than to come on Reddit. I am 20 years old living in the UK and my mother suffers from Mental health. She is my only family and I have no other family members with me, it’s just me and her. She is 40 years old and throughout my life it’s been a complete struggle. I’m mostly here for my mother and rather just go on about her as now I have stayed away from living at my home and now at a friends for a couple weeks, I have a clearer head. I am very knowledgeable about mental health however I feel like the support system for it isn’t GREAT, especially when you believe my mother doesn’t acknowledge her problems a greater deal than I do, and doesn’t want help, however you can tell, all my friends can tell that well she isn’t all there most days. For now I just want to copy and paste some of my thoughts on her mental health and what traits she has and if anyone could help me in any way especially in the UK on what I should do and what other under lying mental health issues she portrays I’m missing out or should consider to know please let me know. The GP is no help I’ve been there I will go again soon they say she has to come to us asking for help, I can’t just get someone sectioned like that, housing Association are aware of her living conditions and I do remember to think about my life too however I think my mother is so kind hearted below and I do love her, I wouldn’t want to live a life where I didn’t try my best first with her seeing if I could help her mental health out. 

Here are some of my 12am notes I’ve written down about her traits:

Severe depression to the point sometimes she can’t brush her hair or teeth. Been a ongoing thing for YEARS

Suffers somewhat anxiety to get out the car or acts quietly sometimes in public. Not extremely bad though really. 

Has extreme obsessions going on for years from constant messaging a famous guy saying she would very much like to meet him and she likes him very much to the point there she thinks there is a relationship with this man, looking into abortions constantly when not in need of one I think this is related to her past trauma but still goes on 20 years later, asks repetitive questions.

Also she speaks to herself at home or whilst driving. A lot of these conversations are from instagram.

Gets lost in her own thoughts whilst driving - having a scenario in her head and her speaking verbally out which then also affects her driving on main roads as she gets distracted.

She has extreme hoardering/clutter in her home so inability to look after herself or home fails to acknowledge the strain on her relationships and the impact it has due to this. Basically lives in safey and living hazard.

Sometimes forgets routes to common destinations she has driven to many times.

Her mood switches and gets bipolar one minute happy then a couple hours later get angry at nothing or suddenly cry.

When living with her gets extreme moments of anger and constant referrals to her ex husband even though there was a divorce 15 years ago.

Always changes subject when something needs to be addressed as if nothing was said in regards to the issue brought up calmly.

Has said previous counselling never has helped or will help and her life is just damaged/ruined.

Does not take her medication regularly at all, for many years. Only takes Prozac when her low mood gets extremely extremely low for a period then drifts/doesn’t care to take them.

So yeah I’m trying my luck here, I have a great support system of friends but I’m at the point I need guidance on what to do and how to help her she is only 40 and has all these mental illnesses i had to grow up with and had severe depression myself stages in my life from a young age as well.

Thank u for reading :)",4.6547653958944295,6.131998220430107,5.054184750733139,82.92014076246336,70.15591397849461,7.937790811339197,27.90899315738025,8.41005564698801,1.9340449462365592,3052,107,578,47,55,969,318,744,0.09,0.782,0.128,0.9772,3,0,1,0,1,0,47.0,1,2,2,6,44,41,1,4,28,1,60,20,5,2,5,100,113,57,0,18,21,7,2,4,3,6,14,7,5,2,20,36,0,0,14,1,0,13,14,17,2,3,16,13,91,22,102,87,17,112,0,9,3,1,90,46,0,18,52,406,111,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04713176488283561,0.042754769367349586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714224673346738,0.04013289859823623,0.0,0.0,0.03279942278312214,0.0,0.03689735792471209,0.0,0.0,0.033724944936595364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018084261521588,0.0,0.04531556391002595,0.0,0.040271716198691514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0543409620259268,0.05061652196001943,0.04265729596153468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491757517440448,0.0,0.05102307441251587,0.08309521688260647,0.05057034797330533,0.15636501393472518,0.0,0.07701867540453677,0.10673560998388464,0.05298060147467691,0.0311056582472003,0.0497250875377494,0.08308432423588044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0422081596021386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03185678969656184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909376986258046,0.0,0.024387554980349863,0.034456959721178036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04102612561461436,0.0,0.0,0.11179180078686422,0.0,0.20159388869769035,0.0,0.08223409347750947,0.0,0.0,0.10635192920294632,0.0,0.04775727589179953,0.0,0.05134387470431871,0.0,0.0,0.09899992053888344,0.2563418719178965,0.0,0.057155167627724185,0.3232890162366638,0.0,0.1935225665296888,0.0,0.04749881720138666,0.055653267242752526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068338099378844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05022621939265659,0.05301410593240208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049320501106730516,0.17033848584393635,0.09425490102603032,0.0,0.2981282578851103,0.0,0.08100548674663609,0.0,0.05265093975983979,0.04100513265564458,0.04353127483192784,0.0,0.0,0.09779938172725074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0485886788278173,0.29163914885346937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091215839643213,0.14305370596210368,0.03719950183139322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925598345874813,0.0,0.10122276828172766,0.0,0.06536652052008039,0.11004785790240744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208582794041473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052944266467361466,0.1367845267351813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04615152256103089,0.0,0.0,0.0540308929696589,0.0,0.04824506526317725,0.0,0.03089866257617772,0.0,0.0,0.10356626326033193,0.05463746845485731,0.0,0.09175937875707013,0.07671206525050013,0.0,0.0,0.03843466973761868,0.0,0.0,0.10897689197641584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04086682809226644,0.037131360006870166,0.14310808242570602,0.0,0.0,0.05140890837964286,0.038518147882016116,0.0,0.0,0.05042257227562895,0.0,0.0,0.10946623354409987,0.0,0.0,0.10879341367355004,0.0,0.08431381054014221,0.04440555739091924,0.0,0.0,0.032043206267682506,0.1236205056166911,0.09477541576149363,0.07658166150054735,0.028124474649234437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06549274158288514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058017172982429525,0.0,0.0,0.11938938595889327,0.08534547273928987,0.03828432690039665,0.03868881151479354,0.0,0.08673274422965828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034262638187926735,0.0,0.0,0.217418845142956
mentalhealth,-pierogi-,2020/02/20,"Well hi Hi, im 14 y.o girl, i was bullied in primary (for the us its like elementary to middle school), it was really difficult and i kind of disconnected. Fast forward many years and in secondary( high school for US folk) and i never had a stable good friendship, i have a boyfriend but its not the same. Lately i started getting a supportive voice in my head. Either repeating my name, asking if im okay, or 2 days ago it told me to calm down in my mother tongue. I used to be scared, but now i feel less lonely. I just don't want it to split off from me. I often lose touch with reality and faze out, i have also a side of me which some times persists for weeks of severe depression, self harm and suicidal thoughts, after i get better,  i dont connect with them memories or emotions i felt, its like i was someone else. Also, sometimes when i write my emotions or start to think slightly delusional-y, i fear someone will do something, if i write it down, i ended up ripped several diary entries out. My therapist says my mental state is bad, so guess thats a thing. I feel bad for my parents sometimes. Right now, im quite positive, might leave school and learn at home. Also, if i concentrate i can kind of spark the voice to come back.

I dont know, ask questions or state your thoughts/opinions.

Love, pierogi ❤",2.741039480259872,4.6832566704980865,3.981246043644848,86.73074962518743,76.16475095785441,6.991237714476098,26.2903548225887,7.893859768569023,1.5656898550724638,1025,39,206,16,23,335,163,261,0.19,0.6920000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.9689,1,2,1,0,0,0,42.0,2,1,1,4,11,20,0,2,8,1,15,2,1,1,1,42,34,20,1,4,12,2,4,2,0,2,0,3,1,2,10,11,0,0,8,0,0,2,5,9,1,0,7,7,36,11,29,24,4,36,0,3,0,1,19,16,0,12,20,130,46,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515857855944631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23047688629520305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17962141964610007,0.0,0.0,0.07387044272344433,0.16042570961680733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496443187571083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275416590383466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619559801323682,0.0,0.08274331796422857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251822068857761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025257443829385,0.2161273751559362,0.08508782640055006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810332651436537,0.09714984070305528,0.0,0.09224044617661632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038323947127144,0.0,0.0,0.08057736845400974,0.0,0.0,0.1058298483405845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985935912570691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150122731197847,0.0963641421103624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113101159238752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20008029575104588,0.05279651804473218,0.0,0.10836900673813947,0.10172225192991556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938680469151086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747563609255074,0.0,0.0,0.08670521540454232,0.0,0.0,0.09739797986427133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681405426086544,0.10191307776225472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409364489520914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667226157688918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076182636856302,0.10218025479795503,0.0,0.0,0.06154368795133019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204163666136145,0.0,0.07639721289294203,0.09618093220250797,0.291678152913428,0.0,0.0,0.10021998506628148,0.21705922763379407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16279638702616148,0.0739579206005235,0.1900276243652312,0.0,0.1359949981895107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508291425569163,0.10901694696066848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154247421564246,0.06382338014263368,0.06155656254783151,0.0,0.07626734436424777,0.056018084515478635,0.0,0.0,0.09179719112220333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311162032366957,0.08297199774467959,0.0,0.0,0.0566634572977189,0.0,0.07706003899696387,0.0,0.08637676360380732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061864709826969164
mentalhealth,BlacKKForesKin,2020/02/20,"I believe I may have Borderline Personality Disorder After hearing about BPD online I noticed that it's symptoms closely aligned with my thoughts and actions. I have taken a few 5-minute quizzes online but I know of course that being told by one of those you have BPD hardly means anything. I would like to elaborate on why exactly it is I believe that I have BPD so that some of you can share your opinion.

I tend to become hopelessly attached to one person and I get very stressed out if they even hint that they may not be interested in speaking to me. I think it's important to note that I have NEVER developed any physical or romantic attraction to anyone, my relationships with them have been purely platonic and I've never wished that it were otherwise. But when I meet someone I think is cool, I'll idolize them and I'll convince themselves that they're perfect.

I have a terribly short temper. I also find myself feeling empty and just lying in bed for hours on end. I've never wanted to kill myself but I've felt for a long time that I don't want to be alive. If that makes any sense.

I really doubt that I have BPD, but if one of you good people think I may need to seek the opinion of a professional, then I of course will.",5.294490740740739,6.1334201028806605,6.017898662551443,78.96783564814818,68.1358024691358,9.037962962962963,31.64840534979424,9.188382445141503,2.7296997942386843,987,40,186,18,16,323,140,243,0.127,0.718,0.155,0.813,0,0,0,0,0,3,16.0,0,4,4,1,6,14,2,2,5,1,22,1,0,1,6,47,40,17,1,8,10,0,3,1,0,5,1,2,1,2,16,9,0,0,9,0,0,1,5,6,0,3,6,6,34,8,27,26,2,18,0,1,0,0,16,7,0,11,11,132,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060224725964944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15408944067899275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921874016764549,0.0,0.0932324163647145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251258084881098,0.0,0.2552901159236923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5707660887559423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984628195862988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034604871120932,0.0,0.0,0.07483050751578274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057285531079284864,0.0,0.10878129923791996,0.0,0.10354989372109777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059192142189379515,0.0,0.0,0.09502676095924874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149037653760047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769208899120488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157309419545064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534451424135215,0.0,0.062264159229535675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055350383284139694,0.0,0.0,0.10026281600887348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562552320438283,0.0,0.0,0.12341184545724675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400706349511022,0.26214106580342633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898750233170372,0.0,0.0,0.2303155756582568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854472769844921,0.19785025223508998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257989973747553,0.0,0.0,0.12163680199891914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959947790041942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977943605215364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177572445019162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177852491439142,0.0,0.08994384950700668,0.06606342734667063,0.0,0.0,0.1082585582635269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348052569429548,0.13364906089799172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022314277966168,0.0,0.1302840565983276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048176319250731,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,r3kkamix,2020/02/20,"I don't know how to feel Hello.

I don't really know why i'm writing this, I guess I just need to talk and maybe someone to explain why I am feeling what I'm feeling. In my day life I pretend to be okay, it's not just pretending though, I actually believe it. Sometime I fall on this song on YouTube and its like the gate of a dam has been opened. For some reason all my emotions spill out, my head feels like its about to explode, and I just cry and cry. There's almost nothing I don't understand normaly, but this is something I don't. I just don't know why this happens. When I listen to the song i'm powerless and all that comes into my mind is how alone I am, how much I hate myself, and so on. I know logically that I'm not though, there are people around me. I just don't know. I don't want this to happen. I feel like my entire existence is made of pain, it hurts so bad, I don't want to exist. 

Before anyone gets ideas, i'm not suicidal, because I don't like losing.",2.5035714285714303,3.225283166666668,4.2547619047619065,89.49357142857143,74.47619047619048,7.1238095238095225,24.952380952380953,7.3011,0.9140380952380948,755,23,174,8,15,256,107,210,0.159,0.725,0.11599999999999999,-0.9329,1,1,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,1,17,10,1,0,3,1,18,3,1,5,2,49,46,15,1,3,9,0,5,4,0,0,2,3,1,0,13,11,0,0,15,4,0,2,12,5,0,0,2,8,28,5,19,43,4,12,0,2,0,0,5,8,0,3,6,110,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.1157734823370984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879872544866613,0.12287309108840742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295438220403356,0.0,0.0,0.10561288885862503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905769583432507,0.07232056621842126,0.0,0.10095211974111144,0.1336642933504722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219605092856647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606363374287317,0.07651163457190202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334516757993809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29993444921337475,0.169509887216922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061983409181489736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069302859441514,0.0,0.2098222165823957,0.0,0.0,0.117130370295952,0.12175671838740387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700433188638052,0.13392775499262155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32600145189188645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379746140620832,0.23184195256705475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13272547018911388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225805501247156,0.0,0.0,0.11918772239440603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11979046499267425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721251141536261,0.0879685038952193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383627029706855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623909636544522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224858597625123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760024803526477,0.12197952627766055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052151258974434,0.0913332560084657,0.11733592239955005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977061323385558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535665475800237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331222801818109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350624392821795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399514212859222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211567711159424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1st_time_long_time_,2020/02/20,"Starting the conversation in the skateboarding world featuring professional Chris Haslam Thankfully people like Chris are starting the conversation. Skateboarding is full of lost people and up until recently there has been no one talking about mental health issues. 

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GvBYyYlgiZc&t=90s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GvBYyYlgiZc&t=90s)",22.780750000000005,30.190227575,11.025000000000002,33.83000000000001,35.75,13.0,40.0,11.698219412168324,7.1615,333,12,23,9,4,77,33,40,0.09699999999999999,0.78,0.12300000000000001,0.2869,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,5,6,1,8,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,5,17,0,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5381416875945731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26396846785553685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591971965075413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12132392586493528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710869628043153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502632477791225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682782073568108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3443284094872296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24520083040625895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35154554974959257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19960224772938007,0.0,0.2286334819406012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway00007382828,2020/02/20,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me, do you? I’m a 16M who’s not feeling the same anymore... my brother says I used to be so cocky and arrogant and he used to love arguing with me, but ever since I got a girlfriend he said I’ve been becoming so soft, I even notice how I don’t have any energy for anything and all I do is think about her...

I also have a major problem where I can’t stop telling lies for fun, that’s all I do, tell lies for fun and I can’t stop... I almost lost my girlfriend after I was caught in one of them lying about her... I’ve always lied but ever since I started dating her I’ve got worse and started lying even more... I love her and I really don’t wanna end things but I’m afraid she will... 

I don’t eat anymore despite being a hungry boy my whole life and all I do is think about her and how much stuff I regret... I get sick twisted fun out of making fun of people and roasting people in big groups of friends and I can’t stop no matter how much I’m asked... I started seeing ants on the wall but when I go closer or touch them they disappear, and smelling/ tasting stuff that I haven’t seen in ages. 

I don’t know what’s wrong with me but I hope some of you do",0.3020689655172397,1.978436095785444,2.451714942528735,96.07977931034485,82.67816091954023,5.0955402298850565,18.869118773946358,5.927762680638738,-0.33514081226053616,915,22,219,6,25,309,130,261,0.209,0.655,0.136,-0.9479,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,3,1,15,15,1,1,6,0,23,6,0,6,5,49,50,24,0,4,7,1,3,0,3,1,2,2,0,1,8,15,2,3,5,0,0,3,11,7,0,1,8,9,42,8,23,39,10,25,0,2,2,2,28,9,0,4,13,143,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862712662715705,0.0,0.0,0.0947376486569472,0.09857365083288637,0.0,0.0,0.08056130909731479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349739481029842,0.0,0.0,0.09748786781950193,0.0,0.110750222414267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13083698518527093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122084488165233,0.0,0.0,0.10492619106534336,0.0,0.0,0.15649206381238498,0.21431953422211136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059900241778361785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915269543744364,0.0,0.06189387724477503,0.0,0.06732726433210423,0.0,0.18949702716409653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766400386184518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021222363509818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367642016129219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932022189241707,0.0,0.21384135387526948,0.0,0.07907733487340818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17417307460277576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487494015482754,0.0,0.0,0.08027599295046042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16425956400896585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335647882999092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589269856828068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268880741446767,0.09420934692971222,0.0,0.0,0.0944024938871431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959934909744255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25155367872703194,0.0,0.0,0.2971299942416177,0.0,0.0,0.2712316891959545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20708995389980067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870390468969285,0.1518171497956557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046341070565932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226366041583734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207275244001978,0.0,0.25904912701529803,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carissadraws,2020/02/20,"Is there a term for someone who absolutely HATES being interrupted when they’re in the middle of something but doesn’t have any specific compulsions? So I’ve noticed this thing about me where if I’m in the middle of something and I’m so close (and I mean SO FUCKING CLOSE) to the end and get interrupted somehow I get really pissed and irritated. Like as a kid when I would watch a movie and my parents came in to talk to me when there was literally 10 minutes left I would yell at them. Or if I read a book and I’m 2 pages from the end but then someone decided to talk to me. It didn’t happen a lot but it happens occasionally and I’m wondering if there is a specific term for it. I wouldn’t classify myself as OCD because I don’t have any specific compulsions, these are just average things I do in my life like reading, watching movies, focusing on any task. It might be a weird form of wanting closure or focus or something idk, this is also why texting while driving is a problem for me cause if I start a text while at a red light and don’t finish it by the time the green comes I feel really frustrated.",4.437195301027902,5.0900302819383265,5.854731277533041,80.04118649045523,69.96916299559471,9.401350954478707,30.99236417033773,9.558583805096642,2.724456328928049,882,36,181,19,15,299,124,227,0.13699999999999998,0.833,0.028999999999999998,-0.9743,1,0,3,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,14,8,4,0,16,0,19,3,1,1,0,36,36,30,0,9,11,1,1,2,0,4,1,1,0,1,11,12,0,0,4,3,0,3,5,6,0,0,3,7,18,2,23,27,5,29,0,0,4,1,6,13,2,11,15,123,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283357659502324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878482029950813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601016891778167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137502903603115,0.0,0.14494337497664786,0.0,0.12154080177620745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499364842643745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134184365534778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044000314210782,0.14743257063830806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24953958790160016,0.0,0.0,0.13930204727837198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330007065508586,0.0,0.09965953237508554,0.13786372635894448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995387669419512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15369375858003745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149679439668323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063753013140594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15666923903749552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13500880714193214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822662547287686,0.0,0.18077806950677694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390985781721543,0.3258653459670308,0.0,0.0,0.099867728331131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22681354452894975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18747442403365275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822735971248927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322145424533267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12731624200943445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301144921931498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20045960152974315,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Motivated_21,2020/02/21,"Looking for suggestions for a good psychologist and/or clinic for a thorough psychological assessment in Ontario (Canada) Hi everyone,

As the title says, I am looking for recommendations on a good psychologist/clinic to get an assessment of myself performed. I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression in the past but I haven't responded well to treatment for those conditions over the past couple of years. I brought up some concerns with my therapist and she thought it would be a good idea to get professionally assessed for a couple of different conditions including bipolar, autism, and possibly a learning disability. 

I am willing to go anywhere around the Toronto, London, or Windsor areas to see a provider.  I'd preferably like to see a provider who has experience with diagnosing adults on the Autism Spectrum (I am 21) because of the special diagnostic skills required to assess adults on the spectrum. Also, I plan on paying privately.

Sorry for taking so long and thank you for reading if you made it this far! I greatly appreciate your suggestions!!",8.7769152854512,10.532360977900556,8.677030386740334,59.71768186003686,60.767955801104975,11.779189686924493,43.81261510128913,11.538034831475384,6.002789686924494,871,52,119,26,12,282,114,181,0.04,0.833,0.126,0.9564,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,3,0,4,4,9,0,0,16,0,10,4,0,1,0,19,22,10,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,2,5,8,0,1,4,1,1,2,1,1,1,0,4,5,14,8,32,15,1,17,0,1,4,0,12,11,0,3,5,88,19,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849623750714733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133541807030641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190799262179653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903266714720169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32790769589119395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276237111915032,0.3007908992870572,0.0,0.15481230897660614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158845084066032,0.0,0.14494449205236098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548316151436857,0.0,0.08421179560717837,0.3728488192094857,0.0,0.16336448568470666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727258868061692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239127463309711,0.0,0.0,0.1311310350269214,0.2488609239001358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402076474978748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829013828537016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16704609697955386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821602828669167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783544670398352,0.0,0.0,0.2361540632578836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587082204185954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140985846934476,0.0,0.0,0.13642048807346466,0.0,0.1720436751283904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763513682994504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322795608214316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525992913754832,0.0,0.0,0.09542044063686918
mentalhealth,Tadys,2020/02/21,"Met a person online, looks like he's suicidal. I need some help. Sorry to throw it here like this, but I need some word of advice.

Me and my friend are running a clan, we play games together and we invite people who seem fun. We invited one that seemed a bit odd. On voicechat he could be quite annoying because he was humming to him self or playing some music really loudly.

Later we discovered that he might not be doing good in life, If it was lack of friends or something else, I don't correctly remmeber. So we decided to keep him in the clan, in hopes that he could make friends and just enjoy the time with us.

But today it got really bad, he was muted a couple of times and team-killed in the game because he was playing music/sounds really loudly. (and that blame falls on me)

After a while he sent couple of mesagges into the team chat saying: ''Maybe I should leave this clan'', ''you guys don't seem to like me here anyway, it's the same in school AND at home.''

After that my friend got him into a private chat and went to play a different game. I messaged my friend how is it going. (he was still talking to him) Well, let me just say I wasn't prepared for this...

He admited to being suicidal, he was saying he wants to kill him self, he sent pictures of knots and some videos, all this came from a ''suicide folder''. My friend believes they are not his but still really worrying. My friend also believs he may have done some self harm.

My friend is still curenntly talking to him, he is not sending any pictures but he is still sad and was sobbing a while ago.

He is around 15 years old and I believe he comes from Sweden. So if you have any advice how we could help him, please do send me some.",3.6775073313783015,4.859725982404697,4.436344868035191,87.5505173020528,72.16715542521993,7.450134897360704,24.49043988269795,7.839951260653429,1.1500654780058648,1324,37,274,17,25,425,169,341,0.138,0.6759999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.9563,1,0,1,0,0,1,43.0,7,2,1,2,16,26,2,0,14,0,32,1,0,3,2,65,52,25,4,11,13,0,0,3,8,3,1,5,1,5,15,22,0,1,5,11,0,11,6,6,1,1,16,6,36,20,31,26,10,37,0,2,1,0,70,11,1,16,18,176,51,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199929566117154,0.06894177256196553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06219567206084808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577768885847852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923516243134031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493786634644931,0.09482036147996124,0.0,0.0,0.2628732864350912,0.0,0.0,0.08490883585010489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889524970103405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699523384264466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18628812930113747,0.17211043952890806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125705763029742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795895900328715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497002214022203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4807027001156806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04420063736558147,0.06523296541076219,0.12440560986141275,0.0,0.0,0.07700828004526282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426026456917507,0.0,0.07801345302944337,0.07724692243584658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912891837161808,0.08604517589988532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235121435414428,0.0,0.07952896998993142,0.054933928183321316,0.11398903640823177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531039608206518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05191460899606884,0.0,0.07813422593566606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250570109352649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533656018405768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161051003470783,0.0,0.052701533156952175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053918553609839666,0.06790907387707848,0.0,0.08537226679651726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827219994247178,0.0,0.0,0.19929552649370905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18554651914333856,0.0,0.0787112280000246,0.0,0.21240701332361056,0.2434050755713348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059874063511263335,0.0,0.08706139088641135,0.0,0.0,0.24844099781934814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552157104069277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502325336289424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070104521125068,0.0,0.07372045942115991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355229378216194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0458729966102828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992797780032678,0.07209708285624501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898305935144569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05008377108508929
mentalhealth,thatgirltag,2020/02/21,"Weight/Mental Health Trigger Warning:

this probably overlaps with my OCD, but I recently been obsessing about my body image and scrutinizing everything that I eat. I used to be a 'normal' weight back when I was 15, but due to a medication I gained around 80 pounds. I'm really working on losing weight and eating healthier because Im tired of being so massive. You know it just sucks to see people around you skinny and then feel so fat.

When I sit down, I put a coat over my legs to hide my massive thighs. I just want to be skinny.",5.0197252747252765,5.953296576923076,5.861978021978023,79.4973076923077,68.80769230769229,9.019780219780221,28.31868131868132,9.23628265651192,2.328152747252747,420,14,80,8,7,138,73,104,0.17,0.784,0.046,-0.9169,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,3,10,3,1,1,3,0,5,13,6,2,0,16,12,10,0,2,4,0,3,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,6,7,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,4,14,0,13,7,0,14,0,1,1,0,2,6,1,0,6,51,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910998280796357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257216237129483,0.0,0.09966825365881964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18161195353795773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3346032104236682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14694350987992202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267065463766379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737931529386359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766083601201718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985547846008919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18291499253258311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16470933186665954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601955608482937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335050814455852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17628095628742305,0.0,0.0,0.1643629413470447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474246658425164,0.0,0.16143680253050965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13028855539440218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879195209880856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412117471425088,0.0,0.0,0.09643670179869702,0.0,0.0,0.5972978845739092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903015174658485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wagswanson,2020/02/21,just ranting kinda school feels so useless i just sit there not retaining any information with my headphones in and i have no idea how im gonna get through the rest of the semester let alone pick a college .im slowly drifting from all my friends and have been desperately trying to make contact with people but no one seems to like me so i just sit there not saying anything . my moms overbearing and keeps saying shes here for me if i need anything cause shes noticed a change in me but she doesnt really mean it whenever i talk about my problems shes defensive and dismissive . no one cares about me the girl ive been talking to suddenly stopped talking to me out of nowhere and im too scared to ask why in case shes trying to distance herself i dont want to make it hard for her and i dont deserve her anyways . my body dysmorphia has been so bad i keep cutting my fucking hair it looks so ugly and i just wanna shave it all off and i hate my body so much i think about killing myself everyday and i feel as though i have less to live for with every passing day,2.005822510822512,4.092561772727276,3.2993506493506497,90.06712121212124,79.0,6.372294372294372,26.38528138528139,7.447530270364453,1.3497554112554109,850,35,178,12,21,276,128,220,0.21600000000000005,0.7390000000000001,0.044000000000000004,-0.9909,0,3,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,19,12,5,1,5,0,16,4,3,5,2,46,34,20,1,5,9,1,4,1,1,1,0,2,0,1,4,13,0,5,7,0,0,2,8,9,0,2,3,7,35,3,28,29,5,13,0,1,1,1,19,5,1,3,5,123,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318604748082122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088332978039127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19575509511413314,0.0,0.11119291460326347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930999468067564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26423122090359896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212673336299979,0.12218422080529145,0.12582282869443012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670650885170734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787937646830434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021214321848726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202793515639605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918928070734282,0.10995818296852801,0.06214128023328081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065469451878665,0.11742870004256463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13426886749069009,0.38542707437962376,0.0,0.0,0.2114388076485247,0.13158957079566327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162428535183235,0.0,0.05810811285854025,0.0,0.1050262655048188,0.0,0.09987970736364288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878684759191672,0.0,0.0,0.1295606103953628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393011785862991,0.0,0.0,0.08743464070912524,0.0881925586933954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13541406397053032,0.0,0.0,0.16119374632845618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245807220729058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380958878007733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619605782233592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18917184344426669,0.1190797645617867,0.12037370603291005,0.0,0.10827857740591007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943922867017878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867985812820445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621199761294825,0.11685802001453532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150500728922285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015393799742438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732491794321007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beepboopuhoh,2020/02/21,"I suddenly feel simultaneously empty and devastatingly sad I’m on a break from school and I’ve had a really good week, despite a bit of dysphoria, and I’ve been happy. And all of a sudden, within less than a minute that happy feeling just disappeared and was replaced with a massive sadness that I feel is going to explode.

I was having a good time and now all of a sudden I’m on the verge of a mental breakdown and I want to SH again. What happened? 

My heart’s beating is taking my breath away and I feel empty. My body feels empty, but my soul is so unbelievably sad that I want to take it out on my body. All evening I’ve been acting like I’m okay when I’m devastated for no reason. 

Is this normal? This feeling is really hurting and I don’t know what to do",0.6139706862091963,2.969780050632913,3.2620186542305163,86.48687874750168,87.10126582278481,5.6047968021319114,20.341105929380408,7.0608816371341465,0.6316658227848101,600,19,123,9,19,209,87,158,0.18899999999999997,0.6859999999999999,0.124,-0.9109999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,6,10,0,0,10,1,13,4,4,1,3,27,30,12,0,3,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,11,0,0,8,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,5,6,12,6,18,25,5,19,1,4,0,0,0,7,0,0,9,82,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15136524362992346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758870175017795,0.3579069122591449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640959347347903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4887629612379721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915607686770591,0.2702576619740932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246630691485127,0.34300259923738924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19091246199333967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724682773898292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854014347270668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870869755392633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623578707817211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785056386404506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20641842162520985,0.16564473401392316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16304879225134006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24226469002606185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394273379665724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19005005726131188,0.0,0.12923024399114355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AS68,2020/02/21,"Problem with anger management Hello everyone. I am 23 and recently realised that I have rage outbursts which I sometimes can't control.

I smashed half of my room and I am also passively aggressive in communication. I am also student and working 30 hours/week so I assume stress is causing it due to exams, deadlines and work.

Any advice?",3.9291100702576114,7.022286360655742,5.2184074941452,73.17032786885248,78.8360655737705,7.420140515222482,34.943793911007035,8.418075326091056,3.743012177985949,272,16,40,6,7,90,49,61,0.263,0.737,0.0,-0.9369,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,3,5,3,1,0,0,6,0,0,2,0,9,6,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,8,0,4,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,29,11,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25981329194415137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4252457153177645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18080642701021354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27313035282812353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29820522982565306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25405820186838873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544097178330573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26252284078074445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629605326773177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30456280493449034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21327161217181528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3871252785642978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Soljaris,2020/02/21,"Can you date an ocd person and be happy in relationship? Control and manipulation I don’t know what to do.. my boyfriend of long term had an ocd crisis over one year ago and it was the moment when everything went down with our relationships( now he takes the medicine). I love him so much but I never sufferEd so much all because of his obsessions and thought related only to me. I don’t know whether I can take it now. We are on the long distance relationships right now. He says I don’t apprecite him (crazy idea he got) and always thinks some dark stuff about me although I was supporting him And loved every second. Now it’s the peak point for me, everything I say if it’s not what he imagines in his head is like an extreme fight and him saying «I ruined everything  and why I couldn’t say Smth in some particular way“ basically Controlling every my word and manipulating my actions. I really don’t know what to do, he changes his mood from super happy to being very accusative and blaming me for everything in the world .

has anyone of you had problems dating someone with severe OCD ? Are there any chances To be happy with him one day? what should be prepared for dating An ocd person?",3.71291304347826,5.8360364217391325,4.748043478260873,81.50423913043481,73.91304347826087,7.730434782608696,26.71739130434783,8.548686976883017,1.990930434782609,947,35,179,18,20,309,130,230,0.11,0.732,0.158,0.9419,0,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,2,2,0,3,9,14,1,1,9,0,22,3,1,4,2,37,34,17,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,0,2,9,14,0,2,7,0,0,2,7,5,0,3,7,4,29,8,23,21,6,29,0,2,0,2,29,10,0,3,17,124,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312832564365277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874173736634503,0.0,0.0,0.07144361602387933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345958593260468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404289571767098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113832584155668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23566485205498974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06775426258801542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770332131595132,0.0,0.3776804562801989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402515424634274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33551127656805163,0.0,0.0,0.10782068264039874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185986462106752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732127781544118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051326444079509696,0.0,0.0,0.1859475405153412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18963941558889674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544606760124502,0.0,0.0810278565782941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238118224619312,0.07990198441617856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834666592159096,0.0,0.0,0.09931456488013768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052712447318972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730338516444223,0.0,0.0,0.3383816413930884,0.0,0.08971967809448587,0.0,0.3341880355879735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186865890494448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901601694771799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026724040082555,0.0,0.11921953030419352,0.0,0.0,0.15798235076298914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731746465749844,0.0,0.08340498634523535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668454832446065,0.0,0.08339081967662157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973906002222229,0.09479926516561324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765445055654917
mentalhealth,JADDO_95,2020/02/21,Speaking Ive always had a problem speaking. I’ve always talked and communicated minimal. I always stutter and mix words cause I think way way too fast. Why can I never control it or what can I do to help it? Never really tried too fix it because I got along with this just fine.,1.7402380952380982,4.128544928571428,3.853571428571428,84.05809523809525,81.85714285714286,5.8761904761904775,23.619047619047624,7.1686216300943375,1.122497619047619,220,8,42,3,6,75,40,56,0.08800000000000001,0.8270000000000001,0.085,-0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,2,13,7,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,2,6,1,3,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,27,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5793887737072332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14148878824849176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384353239638027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26032500542304643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18563522344645156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555747970806594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580266979861772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22209272189252866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869212744405794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18655685704107391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872323300837315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15758376360294504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3684675995635244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094382679737121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ContagiousDictator,2020/02/21,"Life still sucks, and I'm still drunk Still the same fucking shit",4.2723076923076935,5.89495161538462,2.187692307692309,102.53230769230773,71.30769230769229,5.2,20.69230769230769,3.1291,-0.7221692307692305,53,1,12,0,1,14,11,13,0.494,0.506,0.0,-0.8313,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,3,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,3,6,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32388979586972844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474601718789674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3596257609206617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8393617667891078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alisre0,2020/02/21,"I'm scared of everything I can. I apologize for the errors, I use Google translator.  To begin with, I'm too scared.  It is scared in everything, in studies, in relations with family and friends, in their interests and hobbies, and also very scared of the future.  And even though I’m afraid of all this, even if I want to direct everything in the right direction, while I treat everyone with indifference and at the same time I don’t understand why.  I’m unlikely to pass the math exam and stay in the second year, I understand that everything depends on me, but I can’t.  Every time I start to take everything into my hands, I am attacked by sadness and complete indifference to everything, in the end I give up all this without starting.  My relations with classmates are not terrible only at first glance, I just can’t tolerate these people, except for a few good people in my opinion and one girl (with whom, by the way, I communicate very well and I want to tell her about my more and more growing sympathy  , but I'm afraid that she will not like it very much and I will lose contact with her).  My relationship with my parents is nothing, we communicate very little, I’m afraid to tell them what worries me because I’m afraid to be misunderstood, I’m afraid that they will consider me weak, I’m afraid that I won’t become anyone and break their heart.  I’m practically not interested in anything.  I do not read, do not do painting, I do not do any self-development at all, although I would like to.  The only thing that interests me in this regard is music.  I like to do it, but you won’t go far on this.  But the worst and most frightening thing is the future, seriously.  I don’t know what I will do, where will I go to study after school?  Will I go to work?  Will I tell her what I want?  Will I be able to ennoble my parents for everything they have done for me?  Tomorrow literally scares me.  I am more and more immersed in myself.  I just wanted to share my thoughts with someone, I'm tired of the fact that all the time I can not talk to relatives or friends, so let the one who sees this be you.  Perhaps this text will seem to you incoherent typing, but I can not do anything at the moment, except to state the tones of sick letters.",5.818015734265735,5.903444238636367,6.591363636363635,77.94762237762238,66.8409090909091,10.314685314685317,31.92307692307693,10.125756701596842,3.0140157342657345,1755,66,350,39,26,581,193,440,0.152,0.768,0.081,-0.9879,3,0,0,0,0,0,56.0,1,3,5,3,11,30,1,11,17,0,40,5,2,2,5,64,70,26,0,6,20,2,1,3,2,12,3,0,0,1,23,24,0,0,5,1,0,5,15,18,1,4,2,3,59,12,60,52,13,47,0,2,2,0,30,23,0,6,18,257,82,6,0.07890360860927742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309918729775052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053657159574338587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517123773988646,0.0,0.12986189372454962,0.0,0.0,0.089764245687836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048098907451398165,0.0871428365672555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272893242285234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074578635507165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988517739601037,0.0,0.0,0.10423017865754368,0.0,0.0664796933380508,0.07539577936602665,0.4963943297877562,0.0,0.07438329995549145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06711536917512423,0.0,0.0,0.12192146456532775,0.0,0.0,0.07569153115273884,0.13452821732107895,0.0661806033451074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350115610805712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04336335978402569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806842856860262,0.0,0.11564495277382562,0.0790821445482382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882729552723468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058003231093384885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571014050269383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693425447017482,0.12001949976026458,0.0,0.0,0.17522623949614322,0.0,0.0,0.10940365463765953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892496104635008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471294679516643,0.0,0.06738325063032999,0.0,0.0,0.3949813853185033,0.07985466437520759,0.06287596037694967,0.07183088186559554,0.08231367201709733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668547715227528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116967605765826,0.08410074831830547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05932569399892588,0.06341973178456409,0.20689569522550866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484010303152196,0.0,0.07752239484311252,0.06264065161715791,0.1380279861182452,0.09068809090663912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16428287849494222,0.0,0.06814738402167975,0.0,0.2604149622281391,0.18615757071903505,0.06263001185337284,0.0,0.0,0.07094382008219102,0.0,0.07119823409863778,0.0,0.0,0.07606026301750404,0.0,0.05744276680499698,0.08013044461502779,0.0,0.05605085970090398,0.0,0.0,0.05081133698794893
mentalhealth,HerodotusofHali,2020/02/21,"My mom is mentally ill and refuses treatment As stated in the title, my mom is mentally ill, and refuses to seek treatment. 

Ever since the beginning of her mental breakdown, I've been rethinking about my past, and realized that this issue has been undiagnosed, untreated, and unacknowledged for the majority of my (and her) life. It started when we first moved to Oregon in 2000- she began complaining that the neighbors were being too noisy. We even moved apartments in the complex to get away from 'crazy neighbors'- neighbors I neither heard nor came into contact with. And since then, she has always had a problem with her neighbors as long as she's living in an apartment. 

She moved out of apartment living for several years and the moment she came back into it, she began having trouble with her neighbors again. She claimed that her neighbors were now recording her while she slept at night and playing audio of it whenever she was trying to sleep. She was so worked up over this that I eventually got a handful of my friends together and came over to the apartment unannounced to 'put the fear of god' into her neighbors in an attempt to get them to stop. Only when we showed up at my mom's apartment, she vehemently refused to let me take action, and wouldn't give us the apartment number. Needless to say- this is when my suspicions started.

She moved in with her friend and all was quiet for a year before 2018- when hell started. She lost her job of 22 years (layoffs- unrelated to mental health) and it wasn't long after that she started having problems with her neighbors AGAIN. Her neighbors were recording her AGAIN. And when I brought this up; she denied that she ever had this happen in the past to begin with- knowing damn well that my friends and I  showed up on her doorstep looking to beat someone's ass because of it. It wasn't long after that she began her slow descent into madness.

I begged for her to seek help- she wouldn't. There ""was nothing wrong with her"" its ""just the crazy neighbors harassing me"" or her favorite excuse ""you don't know what's going on"" or ""there's something going on that you just won't understand"". Her behavior had become so erratic that I took matters into my own hands and had her committed. Needless to say- it didn't help and only caused more problems going forward as she immediately stopped taking her medication after her release- there's nothing wrong with her, ya know. Not even a day after her release and she was making claims that she was in witness protection and that she couldn't leave the house under threat of imprisonment. It got so bad that I had to almost physically drag her out of the house just for her to get groceries. 

A year of conspiracy and 'you don't know whats going on's' later and I move in to another apartment with her to monitor her, take care of her, and help her pay off her medical bills ($1,500 a day for a stay in a mental health facility- yeah, our system isn't broken at all) and we weren't in the apartment for 24 hours before there was problems. The first week the neighbors were at it again. ""They"" and ""them"" installed speakers in the apartment to play noise to harass her and the switching and replacing of items nonsense began along with lasers being shot into her eyes. And a month in she was sent home from her job, at Goodwill, on account of her being mentally unfit for duty (I got a call from her boss and company lawyer asking me if she was taking medication). She would eventually lose this job and claim that she quit- which was a blatant lie.

The past 8 months have been hell. She's a nightmare and a complete nuisance. Anything and everything is on the table when it comes to my mom's delusions and they're all completely arbitrary. She thinks that people are stealing and replacing food, furniture, clothes, jewelry, antiques, her betta fish, etc. She's become an expert in every field- able to find (or create) details in objects to confirm her delusions (she destroyed her mom's antique ring that she's been wearing for years because she closed her hand in a door and bent it slightly- so she became an expert jeweler/metallurgist, claiming that the properties in the metal were stronger in her mom's ring- this was a replacement, etc). The worst part is her anger and outbursts. 

She screams at people who aren't there (shut up, go away, leave me alone, get out, etc) and stomps on the floor or throws stuff at the walls in retaliation of things being said and done 'by the neighbors'. As a result the police have been called a handful of times and a had a litany of noise complaints filed against us- so much so that the rental office has decided to evict us. The kicker? All of this is done when I'm not home. All of this has happened while I'm either at work or out trying to live my life away from this toxic cesspool of insanity. And- all the noise complaints- I didn't see one posted on the door because my mom hid them from me. I didn't know about the piling up complaints until we were one warning away from being served an eviction- Which still angers me greatly. 

My mom's newest delusion is that she doesn't have to leave. That the rental office is in league with ""them"" and ""they"" the great arbitrators of ""you don't know what's going on"" in a conspiracy against her. We were served our notice on the 4th of Feb and not a single thing has been packed or put into storage on her end. The worst part? I can't help her. I've tried EVERYTHING in my power over the past TWO YEARS to get help and nothing has worked. The state doesn't give a fuck, the county doesn't give a fuck, our family wont lift a finger to help, and the entire system couldn't care less about a former veteran struggling with mental health issues.

Its been tearing me to pieces...

But, if I'm being honest, my patience is all but spent. I've been torn down, lied to, deceived, and blamed for and by my mom for her issues. ""none of this would have happened if you didn't put me in that place"" is her favorite line. And to be honest- I've had enough of being in her corner and getting punched around because of it. All I've read over the past month is to take care of myself and to think about me before her in this situation- two years ago I couldn't see that as a possibility. Today- that idea has changed. The stress and anxiety of this situation has been so great that my own mental and physical health has begun to decline. Stomach issues, sleep issues, eating issues, and alcohol abuse had become apart of my life as I desperately try to find some form of release; some kind of something to make me feel good. And I cannot live that life any more- its time to take my life back.

I feel like a complete failure on all fronts. I feel like had I known about her conditions earlier in her life, when her parents were still alive and our family closer, I may have been able to get through to her. Unfortunately- 20 plus years of lying to yourself and others about your conditions is a lot of time to get accustomed to your own bullshit- and there's nothing I can do to fix that. The only option I have left is to leave her to fall on her face and hope that she learns her lesson. By not leaving this apartment, she will be escorted out and off property by police, the locks will be changed, and all of her belongings will be thrown away. All because she wouldn't stop being an asshole to the people around her, not taking responsibility for her illness, and not seeking treatment. And there's two parts of me in conflict over this situation- the part that empathizes and doesn't want to see my mom homeless and screaming in the streets, and the other part of me that wants it to happen so that she may finally see the error of her ways.

Only thing is... I don't see my mom ever changing. And I feel like this war has just begun.",6.020671542553193,6.631742702792554,5.941356382978723,80.96375,66.45345744680851,8.447872340425532,30.694148936170212,8.29952653288052,2.1572212765957453,6211,221,1168,77,94,1949,524,1504,0.107,0.83,0.063,-0.9961,12,1,3,2,1,0,181.0,13,8,6,12,51,52,13,3,83,1,122,34,13,5,16,199,208,103,1,18,22,12,9,3,15,12,17,11,16,0,74,102,3,9,23,5,4,26,36,32,1,7,65,27,182,20,225,115,40,218,2,2,7,3,176,105,6,17,85,859,256,13,0.06347028803232828,0.037600956290002235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028131290381308845,0.033915217679697816,0.031778162600132914,0.03286803838207505,0.0,0.0,0.02640618207083064,0.0,0.0,0.021580986175450033,0.03327706553912839,0.024277298309456602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02611531951579094,0.05650201283126369,0.029668075725571556,0.0,0.1490810623012284,0.0488047337097912,0.02649751967564594,0.09672724618648147,0.10514691978664753,0.0810128104618604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481026048463061,0.10888965124698212,0.09706828308286833,0.032600734752346795,0.1007147233175164,0.027337016548235317,0.0998210841436992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04093308501493108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495214107039779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032472975015924964,0.0,0.0,0.028107918108536287,0.03279088710742396,0.10617922315346726,0.04192152664280988,0.08611876390171097,0.026738227559156384,0.0,0.05704300229565884,0.0,0.059834138845900726,0.03571085991340469,0.06418496939583758,0.0680147796783878,0.0,0.034764299068123186,0.058010693400329584,0.05398779457648677,0.0383742621134732,0.0,0.07355548063337992,0.05867725853929176,0.13264242342943874,0.09132972563388084,0.10821488208640156,0.026617933137048844,0.07614448119091369,0.10496432493816356,0.0,0.0,0.11225313218628542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13493189634778113,0.0,0.0,0.12762838851545472,0.0,0.06366587394739018,0.031520158611414835,0.03125272429796639,0.07323619070531348,0.0,0.03582511477924342,0.0,0.19873947182167628,0.0944767008689694,0.0,0.0,0.03304726895730035,0.10464483123340876,0.0,0.0,0.16801467660028746,0.03448032682934053,0.032451334878317695,0.13449282442994848,0.04651256508676766,0.0,0.11209085432425547,0.08425381142268676,0.02664952827331962,0.03550350861862813,0.034642658518559334,0.026980084583053288,0.0,0.0,0.04236691011644289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590945666941024,0.25585248786209,0.0,0.0,0.4088459883146394,0.07599206754830297,0.16864717883995625,0.02332898234435106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029781282861556808,0.0,0.1218029063403068,0.03613067180152117,0.0,0.0,0.04300910979467076,0.09654402825860448,0.0,0.0,0.03523812182886105,0.17183034201148742,0.15147392934911513,0.0660034591005876,0.0,0.03315647101579941,0.0,0.0,0.03577660658521635,0.03039349556343148,0.0,0.0,0.12146498759461034,0.0,0.0957077551255136,0.0,0.033754232017280984,0.031743731996834994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03018738923422779,0.0504741205541324,0.0,0.0,0.12644400508968062,0.0,0.0,0.03585167968865509,0.0,0.05250327814420098,0.107014894573739,0.06351612551527731,0.0,0.026889084540461038,0.048862528605001586,0.0,0.0,0.08984919309812328,0.03382544102596071,0.050687454010530784,0.07959600420958936,0.036352500248656716,0.03317646296418747,0.03632914733182356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670261516892652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06325025864502039,0.04066919775321125,0.0,0.0,0.055515053049279416,0.0,0.030081205834331395,0.0,0.03525891268934025,0.08618431854964648,0.0,0.09300187322103988,0.033037404120791904,0.11452041241867138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03743642033992607,0.02518988017066633,0.02545601829538886,0.0,0.02853370570811195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931068842252561,0.0,0.0,0.04508747156663887,0.06939479623061244,0.0,0.16349113815073954
mentalhealth,okay_but_listen_,2020/02/21,I honestly think I should drop out So I've been thinking I should drop out of school and I just can't do it anymore this school is fucking stupid and im going to drop out. I've been bullied and I don't understand algebra 1 and im crying the whole class thinks I'm stupid so I'm done I quit.,-1.6449999999999996,0.29575328787878874,0.9294545454545472,100.15418181818184,99.45454545454544,4.458181818181818,17.206060606060603,6.2581,-0.34041939393939336,231,7,57,3,10,78,38,66,0.312,0.643,0.045,-0.9508,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,3,0,1,0,9,1,0,0,0,14,17,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,0,6,1,5,12,1,7,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,31,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199192176019809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24358506772690905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269301329375525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20500691526551187,0.0,0.0,0.12602724186860678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4790622122290085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358614275881837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4488513994442333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4262707726261247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23085251341960214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247579112073111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ineedhelp2021,2020/02/21,"Confused, anxious , messed up.  Hello Everyone,

I would like to start off by saying that English is not my first language. So please forgive me if some things don't make sense. Do ask and I will try to clarify. I really appreciate and welcome all your suggestions/advice.

I'm in a big mess. This started off when I was a teenager. I would always get picked on,made fun off , called names for being the chubbiest guy in the class. I took those with a pinch of salt, friends being friends and what not. But over the years I feel that the feeling has grown inside me into something else.

I am a timid and quiet guy. Not the brightest nor the dumbest. This started becoming a problem when I joined work and my colleagues started making fun of me, because I did not have a girl friend and that I am still a virgin whose is nearing his thirties. I live with my parents and I'm really awkward socially. This made the situation worse. Now I quit the company, after which lost my mom, got into debt and now have a freelance job that barely pays but since I've put in the work I don't want to quit without seeing some return. The problem with this loneliness is it's bringing out all the rage that I have kept inside from all these years of teasing and abuse. I now work alone at home and I've observed that sometimes I talk to myself. This happens when the memories of my past experiences come up and I pace my room creating those situations with my ex colleagues. Only now I'm fighting them by re-enacting the scene except I'm only punching air. This occasionally comes up when I'm walking in the street. Maybe people see it on my face or maybe I'm mumbling something. I don't know. I also get irritated when someone takes my stuff purposefully and I dread meeting anyone whom I think will make me anxious. My circle of friends is less and the fact that I'm not earning much also prohibits me from joining groups where I might have to spend money.

Please help me. I don't know how to deal with this.",3.3626787330316747,5.410573841025642,4.193273001508295,85.42927601809954,74.69230769230771,6.6395173453997005,27.36802413273001,7.510576382923642,1.5649336349924592,1578,62,302,20,34,506,210,390,0.146,0.763,0.091,-0.9676,3,1,2,0,3,0,38.0,0,1,1,8,15,21,3,4,23,0,25,2,1,6,4,61,60,27,0,6,11,3,2,1,4,5,0,2,2,3,25,23,0,1,6,0,4,7,11,12,0,1,7,7,44,9,41,46,7,49,0,1,2,1,30,22,0,6,21,204,69,7,0.0,0.10951339427375856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032066731539123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572869420074527,0.0,0.14783106935409426,0.0769084330218602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20883719567335252,0.0,0.06462859049348753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640875112908067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634393427090376,0.10208070236703114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438046674527707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15923900703084898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952903652110293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721267035712481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831998608690812,0.0,0.09041341610443164,0.0,0.0,0.09346988153283306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862016311268034,0.0,0.0,0.2856420384443249,0.0,0.09658080171166636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392401163166293,0.0,0.0,0.18303872296891027,0.08173476645625681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619532914899729,0.0,0.09271394458174748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172164055393478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159325535223453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04515619974968055,0.0,0.08161660723080175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089730409444177,0.0,0.0,0.08745866914121446,0.185091467991862,0.0,0.18571495074325306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805269093750324,0.0,0.10825186942350246,0.0,0.0,0.06794603897246566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14059302308586066,0.0,0.0,0.10263160063130854,0.0,0.08823405457597798,0.06407871459585261,0.0,0.0,0.2029188378471891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17688437196001122,0.0,0.09291679570840763,0.0,0.196619495036582,0.0,0.0,0.11842492340234105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07350334685950076,0.0,0.0,0.1473080852108137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645832403469373,0.20778840928459247,0.0,0.09421984899483483,0.07831489428695486,0.1423129060617843,0.09141476408424656,0.0,0.2616872303205259,0.0,0.07381401543322201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580923008166453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949519605260937,0.07429102631402815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061405800954332686,0.059224848618133576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102692154349235,0.06275330595815333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054517090326963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909837431164615,0.0,0.2018685027598597,0.0,0.09419317074872846,0.13131799128728774,0.0,0.0,0.11904264704384734
mentalhealth,xAstrologyx,2020/02/21,"Yesterday I was in crisis... Today I feel fine? Hopefully someone can help to reassure me that this is fine. I'm 26F living in the UK. Yesterday during work, I confided in a friend about how I was feeling and stated I was having suicide thoughts. We ended up calling my GP who told me to go straight to the Crisis Team at my local hospital. I got my mum to pick me up and we went. It wasn't the best experience ever and caused a lot more stress than it should have. 

Today, I've been to see my doctor to get more antidepressants. No support was given, so mum being mum really wasn't happy. However, I'm feeling a million times better today. Yesterday I was thinking how I was going to do it. Today I'm not happy, but I'm not sad. I suppose I'm a bit numb. 

It's making me feel like a fraud and that how I felt yesterday was exaggerated or faked despite me knowing it wasn't. Is this normal? I've been diagnosed with depression since I was 18 but this just feels... Odd. 

Hopefully someone can help!",1.4967020273455915,3.740341282178221,4.050537482319662,83.15483498349839,81.72277227722773,7.015935879302218,23.97548326261197,8.11559375814309,1.6674136727958504,777,29,152,16,21,272,111,202,0.159,0.6920000000000001,0.149,-0.8039,1,0,0,0,0,1,28.0,2,0,0,4,7,17,0,1,8,0,22,3,0,6,1,34,48,11,1,4,6,3,6,1,1,1,3,0,0,0,11,7,0,0,9,1,0,3,6,5,0,1,19,7,22,12,16,27,5,23,0,2,1,0,13,8,0,4,12,100,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339728909837926,0.11290624168195748,0.13937331770379666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303566871177939,0.0,0.0,0.13114354881908427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995468161668427,0.12957375731958198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306669769902092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307021632094652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154771551804797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12487746459429425,0.0,0.0,0.3227475059748659,0.0912014166442452,0.12257508087741215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986309750238627,0.0,0.06669787607796188,0.0,0.14510596953982094,0.0,0.1021025810432651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27179612751269155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711376540756515,0.0,0.0,0.25359339236020106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015943371509174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06236897109318727,0.0,0.1127274625703618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853326057033014,0.0,0.0,0.08521505707428141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12508118620479994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178323979140628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172970443965457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560293000712698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21633438619837175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623584183826716,0.0,0.0,0.1396409844881138,0.14486878202135214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180034838934598,0.0,0.10134898833699517,0.0744404599576102,0.0,0.4840327821860002,0.12198605484386547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183435096457982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293910827341603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,t0jjer0,2020/02/21,"Girlfriend is suicidal, I really need help My girlfriend is suicidal for reasons I won't go into. Please could someone give any advice?",4.1575000000000015,7.450103083333339,5.23,71.81500000000003,80.66666666666666,8.200000000000001,33.0,8.841846274778883,4.080100000000002,110,6,15,3,3,36,20,24,0.354,0.5489999999999999,0.096,-0.8395,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27668482391540844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19254747917534792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260672679611757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27161731321596577,0.16091713469128674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897853066898465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20994752447189688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108068429278612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813891551772717,0.2911189624044666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399068051620503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6194266763954502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nie2000,2020/02/21,"Why am I completely different person when having panic attacks? I can live my day to day life as a normal 18 year old. Socializing, working, studying, and loving someone. 
But why is it when I have my triggers or fear of abandonment that I lose my entire self identity and panic? Why do I cry, scream, and curl into a ball in defense? I started my first session of therapy just this week and I’ve been training my brain that my fears aren’t routed to reality, but why do I resort to panic so easily when I could’ve done something else just as easily? Why am i in this constant state of battle with myself. It’s made my partner lose all trust in me, isolate myself from the world, and make myself a troubled person? No one suspects me as lost person at first glance. I wouldn’t suspect that as myself either!! Until I finally moved out on my own with my boyfriend.",4.535276134122292,5.722104100591718,5.752204142011838,78.90609714003948,70.12426035502958,8.000197238658776,28.87623274161736,8.344100000000001,2.163401972386587,679,25,123,10,12,227,106,169,0.255,0.66,0.086,-0.9808,2,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,6,6,16,3,5,4,0,12,3,1,3,1,25,17,17,0,2,6,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,5,7,9,0,2,2,1,0,1,3,14,0,3,4,2,26,2,21,12,3,24,0,4,1,1,7,8,0,1,14,91,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12716498292047831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12478256064068118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171983699965188,0.1207936105647416,0.0,0.08924659982038784,0.0,0.12278420819933805,0.14417668022237148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11678547847550474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11438893586263048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933771827763165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515653647079267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244865560637305,0.0,0.19015866973442003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895295835861185,0.0,0.0,0.09870308610910733,0.0,0.0,0.25010467728063945,0.12202020681952624,0.0,0.10088509687268753,0.1057681866978584,0.07461348747156757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880360527501965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951988815410124,0.0,0.0,0.11729347260390645,0.0,0.07574448233321797,0.0,0.0,0.3934464394907876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928038714487962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661008919495082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394482304594712,0.09471015785514918,0.08605309322483344,0.0,0.0,0.07911789678704259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278292628361887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966253601873299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5043167328898075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137659269220958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198214334368082
mentalhealth,Comthoughtbat,2020/02/21,"I've created a brand to help me deal with my mental health issues Hey guys. I just wanted to put some motivation out there for you all that you can get better and embrace your percieved weaknesses as a strength. I suffer from major depressive disorder, g.a.d., and social anxiety. These things have affected me so badly that there was a point in my life where I thought people were judging me for just the food I put in my basket at the grocery store. I couldnt go anywhere without severely changing the way I'd act just because I thought someone would judge me for just existing. I'd always have these competing dialogues in my head. One was the healthy dialogue that told me to put myself out there, which made me uncomfortable. The other told me to take it easy and indulge in junk food, play too many video games, and stay in my room. These dialogues always kept me at bay by the fight they always had between each other. It was easy to stay inside and indulge in skyrim and cod but I ultimately felt guilty/more depressed that I wasnt putting myself out there. This is a concept that I like to call thought combat. The idea that the angel and devil are constantly fighting in your head and making your life infinitely more confusing than it needs to be. Thought combat is now my brand and I use it to connect with more people like me. It's very small right now, but its helping me learn more about myself and how to deal with the way my head works. I hope that this can give you guys some motivation to start something like I did, because I feel awesome now that I'm building something i care about. (Apologies for how messy this is)",6.847809523809524,6.886543193650796,6.443888888888887,80.03250000000003,64.68253968253968,9.412698412698411,33.05555555555556,8.998388855275968,2.6612222222222206,1306,49,248,19,18,406,167,315,0.122,0.735,0.14300000000000002,0.7394,0,0,2,0,3,0,28.0,0,6,1,6,18,17,2,1,13,0,18,9,3,8,1,50,40,16,0,5,7,0,2,3,0,1,4,0,1,2,24,17,2,1,10,3,1,6,3,9,0,2,16,2,41,8,37,21,8,33,2,3,0,0,23,17,0,4,9,170,65,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373530579241613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273916610928598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939134991887095,0.11592491286250965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409426341718898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709161709195056,0.0,0.09694469674381148,0.0,0.1005864943682796,0.0,0.0,0.10275225980034304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19605530615972205,0.16379179436107652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897475093342024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04807743731501486,0.0,0.0912957599698011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299524263872411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04967757917287456,0.09121344556711053,0.05403855200610352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18829664883370967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927515167716501,0.10107007683448747,0.0,0.0,0.12746589336466602,0.0,0.0,0.09444008240956787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073385078353865,0.0,0.0992432193857258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343215895499978,0.13936003730272967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997098561239432,0.06346945350374338,0.09640047245875352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582252716535487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050374244789237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443152655805337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183884835145165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988531944637924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3823436039866016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120140218992218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741810109711368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692638547505043,0.08056454890424779,0.14640095200933015,0.0,0.0,0.06730109852260559,0.20269424893533666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149149816222572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316972906664448,0.0,0.0,0.3019449906510827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18171408907861952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821222349229428,0.0,0.07845443743939247,0.05608313501223122,0.15094685204682634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165779255498886,0.0,0.06922244276732703,0.0,0.0,0.06754509999277718,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NiceButNotTHATNice97,2020/02/21,"Is this acceptable? Is it acceptable to switch to a different counselor simply because I don’t really like my current one that much? What do I tell the current one? She didn’t do anything wrong, I just don’t feel comfortable with her.",3.8723333333333336,6.1339264,4.793055555555559,80.73625000000003,73.8888888888889,8.944444444444445,31.25,9.516144504307137,3.2793333333333337,188,9,34,5,4,61,33,45,0.065,0.6970000000000001,0.237,0.7983,3,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,1,1,6,4,3,7,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,26,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3028869713013117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22436962811827516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845506496270434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18610523769025225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798184645104276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705708732205899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4988221184196709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357925158009408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217059226270775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4024224103720544,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatsityaknow,2020/02/21,"Does anyone else shrink? I've been struggling hard this past year. I wake up and instantly feel the hollow around me. I go through my normal morning routine, and I drive to work. My awareness is always more prominent at there. Whenever I sweep or mop the floors I feel too close to the ground, kind of like I'm shrinking or standing at an odd cartoon like slant. I'm not sure if this has anything to do with anything, but I was wondering if anyone else got this feeling too? After it's brought to the surface I can't stop thinking about it. Am I just so in my head I'm hallucinating things?",3.765979284369117,5.212796822033898,4.323333333333334,87.41874764595106,72.3050847457627,6.9393596986817325,29.21280602636536,7.3871296695380915,1.5928557438794724,467,19,95,5,9,148,84,118,0.055999999999999994,0.856,0.08800000000000001,0.5547,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,1,5,0,7,2,2,0,1,20,18,8,0,3,7,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,6,5,0,1,5,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,4,4,12,4,14,14,1,17,0,0,0,0,0,9,0,5,6,58,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15562176912862186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615477963522417,0.3832633214178893,0.3078152088405083,0.16649402728011928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16366892744788467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124747674082888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837000004976246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10629197455327348,0.0,0.1495828873269891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16753980357548026,0.0,0.19194405731923786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19476024387809926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18274426915376896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832471304018312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785388042765371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15636327076035447,0.0,0.19552163376243234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17627109965427748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242526860033292,0.11983959828838332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028232240505416,0.13615816582777995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043950583060226
mentalhealth,SeraphAndCircus,2020/02/21,"I’m willingly being Hospitalized tomorrow for Mental Health I’m 16F (I’m in Alabama in the US, and Bisexual in case that matters) and tomorrow my parents are taking me to the ER then a Hospital on the advice of my longtime Therapist and Psychiatrist. I’ve been diagnosed with OCD, ADHD, Depression, and Anxiety. That being said I’m mainly going for severe anxiety and depression which has lead to Suicide attempts, self harm, extreme/intense random outbursts, and failure to function in society/school. The program is about two weeks and ironically at a University where I was looking to go to college (since I could get a full ride due to act score). This feels a bit like what I imagine jumping off a building into a bag of marshmallows feels like. 
I know I need to to go so that’s not what I’m worried about. 

I was wondering if anyone had any advice, experience, or expertise on what I should expect and what it’s like so I can prepare. 

Sorry if I messed up with this post thingy, I’m a little nervous.",4.619531250000001,6.417693140625001,6.303041666666669,72.67112500000002,70.71875,9.495,33.63333333333333,9.888512548439397,3.767399583333335,801,40,136,21,15,275,121,192,0.16,0.79,0.049,-0.9642,1,0,0,0,0,1,24.0,1,0,0,2,5,8,0,1,11,0,13,2,0,1,0,27,31,14,1,6,4,1,2,3,0,2,2,1,0,1,11,11,0,0,5,0,0,7,1,5,1,1,5,4,13,3,26,21,3,26,0,2,1,0,4,13,0,5,8,93,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18190181850413265,0.295808808604739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292801681114096,0.0,0.23157553118378066,0.0,0.0,0.10583240206211543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652427497349976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12084632661415655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26072729322826704,0.15362426830139056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480562848719061,0.0,0.0,0.15306139291522836,0.1081295409645811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907783660592524,0.0,0.2580591802444012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608855172642954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318190266210652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22183629803841792,0.15169957500722728,0.0,0.0,0.1271018419559327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15253235508879776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222937023559597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16806414528544636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495826079815272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397526050591894,0.0,0.0,0.15318146361944654,0.0,0.0,0.15789846284025874,0.17099043851384985,0.0,0.12520415544341168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16943187928310646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655600988243498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380170097886355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17573725648034186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14785389157751924,0.0,0.18206395263587472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140953419603673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16414031618406674,0.0,0.15371047994057827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,He_who_humps,2020/02/21,"When I do something impressive, I act out what I think other’s reactions are to it and it makes me feel good. When I make a good post or play a good song or anything that is “impressive” in my estimation, I am machine that I am the person being impressed by my work and then I relive it to get pleasure.  I worry that this is unhealthy, but it sure does feel good.  Opinions on why I do this and if it is a problem?",3.09,3.7181475977011513,4.848908045977012,86.12439655172415,73.02298850574712,7.639080459770115,28.29310344827586,7.793537801064563,1.596986206896552,319,12,70,4,6,109,55,87,0.084,0.665,0.251,0.9072,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,2,11,0,0,4,0,9,0,0,2,1,16,15,10,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,12,4,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,12,10,6,14,0,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,4,3,53,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17295113157758885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839202573052121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21253546372600854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980459770673963,0.0,0.0,0.7051189480604401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805788013297785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835114134182238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012837502185429,0.0,0.0,0.2011032934025871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16179831935173974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19808174043427085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466777167933094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18964478032030452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15300549275747505,0.2134367622788558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IZesler999,2020/02/21,"Please help me in my mood trackers research :) Hey guys!

My name is Irina, I'm a student at Paris-Sorbonne University. I am currently conducting research for my master thesis concerning mental health tools, especially mood trackers. I use Daylio by myself, however, I'd love to find out more information about why people use mood trackers, probably the reasons are different from mine.

I'd be super grateful for having your opinion on that topic. The survey will take no more than 5 minutes to complete. Your help would be greatly appreciated! :)  
[https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/W8BYVPB](https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/W8BYVPB)

Thank you in advance!",8.052878787878786,12.269026535353534,6.817398989898994,60.879431818181835,71.52525252525253,7.7444444444444445,33.502525252525245,8.59863814320734,3.8157131313131294,533,25,64,11,12,161,78,99,0.019,0.7070000000000001,0.27399999999999997,0.9827,3,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,3,0,3,1,7,0,0,3,0,8,2,0,3,0,9,14,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,11,4,13,10,2,7,0,0,0,1,10,5,0,1,1,39,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23682758338533705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359932364475344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064473519752134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490300283754996,0.0,0.22365359725213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400965327698972,0.0,0.0,0.30280098721396154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20386267908558706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276307415035088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15659456965386767,0.0,0.0,0.2479449555734392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24353345159067516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322390251128243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16983128309464998,0.0,0.0,0.2079570591707544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3901701569021769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20381872736733334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604564359876698,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bowserkin,2020/02/21,Anyone else relate to any of this? I have crazy emetophobia (vomit phobia) makes me anxious to eat so I never eat. I’m also very anxious and scared of everything and the whole world I’m always afraid of kidnappers stalkers vomiting . Terrified of crumbs and germs and sickness and always scared something bad will happen to my body like my appendix bursting or kidney stones. I’m always alone so I’m very anxious and in my head and so I have trichotillomania I thought I got over it but now it’s back I think☹️ so many years of shaving my head and my hair might be thinning again.. right when I feel good abt my hair length as it’s finally grown out!!😑😑😑😑 tried to stop biting nails so now I just chew them and pull my skin fml and I never eat I’m very skinny and ppl mention it 😐😐😐😣!! Does anyone else have any of these problems?,0.6578337462152462,3.0394779653179214,2.492221304706856,91.86755298651256,87.26589595375721,5.144949077897055,19.798788879713733,6.655083550727371,0.26928813652628714,660,20,139,8,21,218,101,173,0.14800000000000002,0.818,0.034,-0.9312,0,1,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,12,7,0,3,1,0,6,16,9,1,2,22,16,21,0,1,3,0,5,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,11,5,1,2,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,2,5,18,2,13,11,1,17,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,11,72,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122603789502916,0.0,0.0936029419663942,0.2921789969182329,0.0,0.0,0.1591927949885788,0.0,0.0,0.3966914937254888,0.0,0.16368483923610952,0.23985824398572445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900023973044058,0.0977298762701926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300135228516708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242916381208443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35930681844326684,0.19555653988261204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10519485643705163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591827951657931,0.0,0.0,0.12821994994762956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817399303388304,0.09361367675840268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035048266195864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402492592391268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057183556380398876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813019736024407,0.1186679185504404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12416903130813635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18054868550215825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119987677534612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999580306556916,0.0,0.0,0.23437017984598899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010897875102987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785705402148197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499939075585271,0.0,0.09292273845604626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946765292931603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28972964201898155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306794912653623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537483176883067
mentalhealth,dragosmilosevic,2020/02/21,"I need help I need help. I dont know what to do. I'll start by by giving some basic info about myself. I'm 18 with a long history of concussions (which has me convinced that I have CTE), have a hyperactive brain, can't find a job because of the shithole city I live in, all my friends have moved away, and have absolutely zero motivation. I feel like a useless hunk of meat. I'm pretty sure I have depression. I have never had suicidal thoughts, but I question why I continue to live. I've had a lack of mental stimulation, which has caused me to not even feel real. I can hardly tell the difference between a dream and real life. I dont feel sad, but I cant remember the last time I felt happy. I just exist. I just go on with my day without any emotional response to the world around me. I sort of live in a bubble. I can't even begin to imagine what would happen to my mind if it bursts. The one thing that overwhelms me the most is my loneliness. I go months on end without hanging out with anyone. Besides my parents, nobody has ever cared for me. Just an afterthought. I dont believe this is possible to change. I feel like I was destined to be a loner. I accept that but I yearn for the feeling of having someone care about me. I want to ask for a therapist but my parents are pissed off with me so I doubt that they would get one for me if I ask. Sorry for the self-pity.  I really wonder why I haven't put a gun to my head yet.",1.86829431438127,3.5332586555183987,3.8916555183946495,87.64410535117062,77.8294314381271,6.874247491638798,23.874581939799327,7.748469712250963,1.1391377926421409,1114,37,239,17,26,380,163,299,0.1,0.732,0.16899999999999998,0.9382,3,0,0,1,0,0,35.0,0,0,1,1,11,16,1,2,19,0,28,4,3,3,4,57,53,9,1,9,12,2,7,2,1,2,1,0,0,0,11,8,0,0,17,1,0,5,11,7,0,3,5,7,46,9,40,45,4,27,0,5,0,0,11,9,1,8,15,169,57,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510291777644674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693996817383521,0.0,0.0,0.08522423084960785,0.1789981494677458,0.0,0.08994595577900938,0.0,0.0,0.05835901940740953,0.0,0.0,0.1078602878489489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687165041334068,0.0,0.0,0.19521593069222665,0.0983459669905249,0.10127467913517198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061740998451100475,0.0,0.08245620608944883,0.0,0.0,0.10002244516306098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33660126730736606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10768871629690906,0.08479257929226568,0.0,0.0,0.12646380846092453,0.08659756880001808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24203184872376585,0.1367858593358245,0.0919203801207236,0.0,0.08749983369371125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396443592754545,0.0,0.05001745932733835,0.091837502545826,0.10881653744308817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465792961752767,0.10191142921330587,0.08575953822290443,0.0,0.09825148035888973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283379794897746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500197439941144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05261331887348045,0.07803660466072475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06762029021906238,0.0935423332309733,0.0,0.2536066336323773,0.08472224751933424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647811819608397,0.0,0.0966648138541454,0.0,0.07641456982917798,0.10175089616374702,0.0,0.14197221881689942,0.07383654660838042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974469821892798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21260423683793167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792655432434392,0.0,0.0973966653325049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962398730970671,0.10724483798543433,0.0,0.0,0.2179342253842563,0.061330136886865935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844881752492797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998722307277956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111574909922091,0.0,0.0,0.10716722275837127,0.06776155388581571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471828599009184,0.0,0.09022887568078057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367639746755458,0.0,0.0,0.11115543185769076,0.06360191875120806,0.0,0.0,0.07600270353567529,0.0558237067981896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05646684019489396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277145555683124,0.0,0.0,0.1845697792639638,0.10382026040527588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601444949211455,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EmpressAmethyst,2020/02/21,"Healing Experiences on Social Media Platforms (Short Study)  Hello everyone!

My name is Clara, I am an undergraduate Psychology student at the University of Toronto who's currently working on a supervised study on potentially ""healing"" qualities of social media for one's mental health. If you are currently a student, I would really appreciate it if you could take 10 minutes of your time to fill in my questionnaire. As a student who is very passionate about mental health, my goal with this project is to uncover aspects of social media that can contribute to improved mental health, then for my data to be used to create stronger mental health services online and at post-secondary institutions. This study is totally voluntary and **strictly anonymous**; I will have absolutely no way to trace back to you.

Herre's the link to the study: [https://forms.gle/rUYMZj8w9wDt76Ly5](https://forms.gle/rUYMZj8w9wDt76Ly5)

**Important**: This study will ask to recall a time when you shared a personal story about a troubling time in your life on your social media platform. This may cause some personal discomfort.

Feel free to DM me if you have questions or concerns! :)",7.7785060690943055,11.061602555555556,7.039004046062871,64.39820728291318,65.77248677248677,9.738064114534703,34.92717086834734,10.056822442137396,4.434188048552755,949,45,127,25,17,293,115,189,0.044000000000000004,0.836,0.12,0.9322,2,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,8,0,2,4,5,0,1,10,0,15,8,0,2,1,18,19,9,0,5,4,0,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,8,3,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,2,0,1,0,1,16,4,28,13,2,21,0,0,0,1,21,11,0,7,8,90,24,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210343331140704,0.0,0.0,0.0922064892466354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318474335908995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574159756729307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458299698797468,0.0,0.11729893361817745,0.0,0.0,0.06063213791499077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5098520370422089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469882753102533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4833805632679405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125685191463444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094086159981786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484449596638095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433116016944255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681999988178786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4889490205743093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016042905780322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20976851026185744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103567223042899,0.0,0.0989416353392585,0.0,0.0951821775687552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729884392923637,0.0,0.0,0.08518348828390837,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nummoth,2020/02/21,"I keep spacing out...and not remembering things I'm not sure if I'm spacing out or disassociating but it has been happening a lot the last few months.  I'll space out for 10 minutes with no recollection of anything said. I'll ask my boyfriend a question and then while hes talking, I check out for the entire response. Ill have no memory of things that happened. Its especially bad while driving. I check out and almost run a red light. Also another time, I was so gone that I didnt even realize I was following the wrong route to work. I have to ask people to repeat themselves so frequently because I wasnt ""there"" for what they said even though I'm looking right at them as though I'm there. It gets worse when I'm stressed. My memory in general has been awful.",4.257117224880382,5.5000488026315795,5.3254066985645965,81.49375598086125,70.84210526315789,8.685167464114832,29.607655502392344,9.095868883498916,2.38632105263158,606,24,122,12,11,200,96,152,0.20600000000000002,0.794,0.0,-0.9853,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,1,10,4,0,1,6,1,11,1,0,0,1,21,27,15,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,8,7,0,1,4,0,2,4,6,3,0,0,9,5,13,1,16,18,2,23,0,0,2,0,9,10,0,5,9,77,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784274329837398,0.0,0.0,0.1340420803936032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17575949998392082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13793330107844504,0.0,0.31339579199855944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995196792606426,0.10217687256448446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214169561507517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757219740124468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964437228019965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14898438632234492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662902993828527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075483184112214,0.0,0.0,0.14250073132997595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337891185079526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620350513466875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877677564720225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898757230764352,0.14314274850406833,0.3188815090314505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200302560802698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15797565527465504,0.0,0.0,0.13472301546917625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227126231073644,0.0,0.3293628183460165,0.0,0.09773796464564263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202610359738975,0.0,0.17081454691756615,0.0,0.18326127153004335,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KeepingUpWithAddy,2020/02/21,"[24F] I was having the best day ever. One small thing, and in an instant, I was down in the dumps. Today, I'd rested enough. Spent time with the family. Exercised. Eaten. Read more than a couple of pages. Found out that I sort of have family in the same city as my penpal, and that the chances of me visiting were higher now than ever before; cried, because I was happy. Sang my lungs out coz no one was home. Danced with the dogs. 

Then, my father walked in with muddy shoes; walked all over the house, went in and out of the bathroom, only making it worse. 

On a normal day, with an outsider, something like this would just irritate me, and I'd respond with a ""I'm not about to clean that up; mop's in the bathroom"" and that's it. But this time, all hell broke loose. I raised my voice, said a few mean things, knocked over the glass on the table, started crying when father walked out, felt taken for granted coz he knew I'd clean up the mess even if he didn't, etc. Then I... began hitting myself because I needed to not be anxious and restless and think negatively about everything that was going on (and other random topics). And I did that, fully aware that I  was making a conscious choice of behaving that way, and that it wouldn't benefit anyone. A few bruises and a lot of tears later, I just grew really quiet, regretting the whole thing. 

I've not resorted to self-harm in forever. I did, back in school, but that was because of the bullying. I'd gotten over it, and it was supposed to be history. Other than that, I'm not violent. I don't ever raise my voice in an argument, or break things. 

As for my history, I've had depression and borderline disassociation in 2019, but a lot has happened after that which could've caused a relapse, but none of it did. I'm embarrassed  to talk to anyone about this, because I'm usually the Listener and the mature friend who has the mental stability to counsel others in the worst situations. Or so my friends think. 

Right now, my mind feels anxious. Restless. Down. I'm constantly seeing the negatives. Despite knowing that in actuality I have many things to be grateful for, a family who cares, a faith that assures me of a God who loves me (non-religious people — I'm just talking my mind here, not forcing my views on anyone else. Apologies for the offense). 

It's late. I'm still crying. I have work in the morning. And I can't seem to understand how I can think in parallels - focusing on the negatives and feeling like shiet, while fully being aware of how I'm feeling/behaving right now. I don't really know where to go from here; possibly sit this episode out. Or think about what exactly made me react in order to avoid it in the future. I just hope I can stop worrying about never being able to fully function normally without a nagging fear of some kind of unannounced episode like this repeating itself. 

I apologise for taking so much of your time. But honestly, thank you for reading this.",4.1490725355488065,5.771666367311077,5.193655136603294,80.85964391276563,71.61862917398945,8.265873142674549,27.51881290941045,8.841846274778883,2.198518101933216,2309,83,431,44,44,759,275,569,0.111,0.755,0.134,0.9633,0,1,1,0,0,0,95.0,0,2,0,2,26,31,5,5,39,0,32,5,2,9,8,94,77,35,0,8,19,2,3,3,2,2,1,6,4,0,42,26,1,2,15,5,1,9,17,15,0,2,25,11,38,16,82,44,18,79,2,3,2,1,19,37,1,11,32,311,80,4,0.08079916218107536,0.0,0.07884832686946139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825601093949436,0.0,0.16948995861331018,0.08278829005774196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06212956828261236,0.0,0.1970176772594961,0.0,0.06875413587660126,0.0,0.08479373579687427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238013082548062,0.08300299671353048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731518988950145,0.0,0.0645115563139238,0.08940273612873356,0.26626225685864074,0.10421755051776588,0.0,0.06959219999038807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749733208025001,0.0,0.0,0.08348713351055169,0.09011242412584003,0.05336708458555287,0.2192624040963512,0.0,0.0,0.07261707700829728,0.0,0.2285107774891045,0.09092152095793797,0.0817089682838705,0.05772293760659621,0.07757986669450277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859211085909939,0.12485046454022206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09184005176985656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145043227339402,0.08601221059607045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104814762861848,0.08025179927715864,0.0,0.09323138485378824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413989370152153,0.08881021290815456,0.0,0.09114497430403626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184231679550392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738511656193508,0.07292439847833025,0.07645412089774388,0.10786813634328916,0.08191766852163787,0.0,0.08801397470125356,0.0,0.0,0.08142655131276189,0.0,0.16316824110179692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05939668107384573,0.059911554954800876,0.062317294984392216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583320473019055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950320678529944,0.06145140378839994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05601596549306137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910889150619594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616420551637301,0.0,0.1035240245479788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800408604703335,0.07685850605616497,0.0,0.0,0.08177306578864246,0.06438647115552437,0.0735565226453471,0.08429114779735546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09082164364371624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622031425368991,0.0,0.0,0.05719006286277058,0.0,0.06452631529033948,0.0675517175303655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06075091438036522,0.12988661188656428,0.0,0.07438901282653633,0.0,0.0,0.2683968654042199,0.20709136239383155,0.0,0.0,0.14134392371230542,0.0,0.07658815814960444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411477736599995,0.0,0.0,0.0889888619228039,0.0,0.0,0.06413461404790985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490163283402322,0.0,0.09020937907073867,0.0,0.07788750901773031,0.0,0.05882275238119996,0.0820554712795486,0.08234124912805778,0.05739740657222035,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TeachingSelfCare,2020/02/21,"Let's talk Mental Health I created this profile on Reddit today, to eventually create my own subreddit. You heard it from me first.

I am a 30 year-old mother of three beautiful little girls I have a wonderful life and I wouldn't trade it for the world now. The last 30 years of my life have been full of trauma. A tough childhood. I became a widow and a single mother in 2012. (Luckily I'm not a single mom anymore and have a wonderful partner). Our backstory of how we met is kind of wild. I'll save that for the next posts on my profile.  

I want to tell my story, no matter how hard it may be for people to head. I need it, I need go purge it. 

Im going to a neuropsychologist in April. Anyone have any info about one of those docs? 
Im hoping it answers questions so I can find the best treatment for me. 

Nice to meet you all 😊",0.8542838792549787,2.9407757803468217,3.2323217726396933,89.00688985228004,83.10404624277456,5.925369299935774,19.43770070648684,7.1686216300943375,0.4235962748876045,642,17,137,9,18,221,113,173,0.046,0.777,0.177,0.9697,0,0,0,0,1,0,20.0,2,2,0,2,5,7,0,0,12,0,12,4,1,2,1,22,23,6,0,5,1,3,1,0,1,2,3,1,0,2,9,4,0,0,6,0,1,2,3,2,0,3,3,2,19,5,21,16,6,18,0,0,0,0,15,7,0,5,8,91,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851655917768578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15825564796700808,0.11157863987958516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16746425194621167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14584877614343264,0.13573452244959566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18138044542799034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294797103523532,0.0,0.1637701188642886,0.16962089910930606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584941081671544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34473704317201603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16617293984207832,0.0,0.1300750276165794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16317638003604468,0.2254252643596235,0.0,0.1599362002544648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16081419666208588,0.0,0.0,0.18689246140860813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366458710458167,0.0,0.0,0.16970995908311948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674472535234001,0.0,0.1081322366426948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062930144759736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15282886208776628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178760663964559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826044337471698,0.1394756955247949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125856281631664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412154500705046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34610483882760223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055223012508135
mentalhealth,minervae23,2020/02/21,"A study on mental health literacy and help-seeking attitudes (US, 18+) Hi everyone, 

My name is Minerva Escobar and I’m a Master’s student in the Clinical Psychology program at California Lutheran University. I’m looking for participants aged 18+ who live in the U.S. for my thesis on mental health literacy and help-seeking attitudes. More information about the study is listed below and you can participate at the link provided. Please feel free to contact me any time with any questions you might have. Thank you! 

This study has been shared with the permission of the moderators of the Mental Health forum at [www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth](http://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth), moderated by the South Asian Mental Health Alliance (SAMHAA). 

*Purpose of the study*: To examine the effect of mental health literacy on attitudes toward mental health service seeking.

*What the study involves*: Completing an online questionnaire about your knowledge and opinions of various elements of mental health, and reading information about mental disorders.

*How long the study will take*: Approximately 25-35 minutes.

*Who is eligible to participate*: Any adult 18 years or older who resides in the United States.

*Benefits of participation*: All participants will be learning about specific mental health disorders.

*Compensation*: A raffle for a $50 gift card will be held, which you may enter whether or not you choose to participate in the study. If you consent to take part in the study, at the end you will have the option of entering your email if you wish to participate in the raffle. If you do not consent to take part in the study, clicking ‘I do not agree’ on the consent form on the study website will also take you to the raffle email entry page. Please note that winning a prize is not guaranteed.

*Privacy and Personal Information*: Only the researchers working with the study will have access to the data. Survey submissions will be unliked from IP addresses and individual responses will not be reported, so survey results will remain confidential unless otherwise required by law. Every attempt will be made to keep your data secure to the extent permitted by the technology. However, no guarantees can be be made regarding the interception of data sent via the Internet by any third parties. Participants who choose to provide their email address for the purpose of entering the raffle will do so in a separate survey, thus ensuring individual responses to the questionnaires will not be associated with emails. Emails will not be used for any purpose other than for conducting the raffle. 

*Conflicts of interest:* None.

*Where to participate in the study:* Visit [https://callutheran.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_3ICuzGwWasEUFuZ](https://callutheran.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_3ICuzGwWasEUFuZ)

*For additional information*: Contact Minerva Escobar at [minervaescobar@callutheran.edu](mailto:minervaescobar@callutheran.edu).

This research has been approved by the Institutional Review Board at California Lutheran University.",8.087217583299878,12.176092197872345,7.627213970293059,56.174056603773614,69.57446808510639,10.355680449618626,34.82537133681252,10.147724280616023,5.145993576876756,2503,122,305,80,53,787,225,470,0.005,0.903,0.092,0.9888,1,0,0,0,0,0,123.0,1,13,1,8,9,8,0,0,42,0,40,9,0,8,1,59,56,19,0,4,14,0,1,0,0,15,9,0,2,2,10,13,0,5,13,1,1,5,9,0,0,1,6,3,18,9,70,26,9,36,2,0,2,0,39,24,0,10,6,215,28,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05477485376513777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23289230773039096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181495308687195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700076590480624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066560499668504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05770938797927675,0.06544922313809147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03463276775832838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5824497633499337,0.0,0.0,0.09182054885915593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06088086629312474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604817072000709,0.060615285504213086,0.0575179474102071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962189433207705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6212351496255162,0.0726616107269773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05209298906903546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483452686130944,0.0,0.0,0.0598065664006942,0.0,0.15037230966175996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672927316826288,0.0,0.06851281902147634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20599670787977467,0.0,0.0,0.06306033374555066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03993956752272822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239018956653195,0.05915706927650503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876504572398768,0.0,0.0,0.0498646541477847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044108072897878006
mentalhealth,hannahdav827,2020/02/21,"I’m so miserable in life I want to run away, leave everything behind and finally be happy Hello, I’m Hannah. I hate my life. So much, i tried to work past it with medications and therapy but I’m still just a depressed as before. I’d rather not give my real age, but I’m under 18. So I still live with my parents. 

They’re not good parents, they have issues with drugs so it does make my home life stressful. We do not have much money. So we have a lot of financial stress too. I’m in a dead end relationship, I broke up with him before but we are together again somewhat. I’m not happy but he pushes me so much to give him another chance. He won’t listen to me.

My life feels repetitive and pointless. My dreams for the future and my family are the only thing keeping me from killing myself. School has become a chore, so has showering, cleaning, and getting out of bed. I dream of leaving home, and this whole life behind. Living in a cottage all by myself with a bunch of dogs and cats, and a ferret named Marvin. I dream how I’d go to farmers markets on the weekend and baking stuff for my neighbors. Just living my life happily. 

This extremely detailed fantasy of my perfect life makes my current life dull in comparison. I can’t be happy for some reason. Everyday feels the same. Once I turn 18 I hope I’ll have enough money saved from my job that I can go start a new life, I know I’ll have to work to get to where I really want to but I don’t know what to do with myself in the meantime. I’m so unhappy. I hate myself, how I look, my life, everything. I just want to runaway and have my own little corner of the world that I can be alone and happy. 

This is more of a rant then anything.",0.9494405067109036,3.1829409226361065,3.037687377469464,89.64196614386972,83.8997134670487,5.965947820841503,20.64552857789172,7.273561745256523,0.6699982808022917,1318,40,276,20,38,445,172,349,0.154,0.716,0.13,-0.9021,6,1,1,0,0,2,41.0,3,0,1,3,20,17,3,3,15,0,21,13,0,5,2,57,51,28,2,5,13,2,2,0,1,1,12,1,8,0,10,21,1,1,5,5,2,4,7,9,0,0,0,4,45,8,43,47,13,33,0,4,1,0,17,14,0,4,15,187,55,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126764713400665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227898447885305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457125753992585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372187548659064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08666010299648334,0.13353845291720925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758309593549969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686665776218788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909962480092722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949804378230956,0.08107688726901567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104129148626324,0.0,0.07397124869106401,0.0,0.07935005709091293,0.0,0.0,0.08595623373343977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199103287634797,0.1505444657082147,0.08918865950984091,0.06581399146710201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33411626481941986,0.0,0.154938880719426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574166282237378,0.0779349560768848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818986572905784,0.07786591033466049,0.06974464544408182,0.08681157504953871,0.0,0.0862462911052238,0.0,0.0,0.1661694232258516,0.0,0.0,0.5542322134132245,0.0,0.07864406371995776,0.2078621157037356,0.0,0.06589211180868602,0.0,0.0,0.06670942658801905,0.0,0.0,0.10475401852332533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904676057247012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730457549474695,0.0,0.0,0.0757834508742722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356427951422604,0.0,0.05967732185756702,0.0,0.0,0.17425556202433906,0.0,0.07490516895014156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931207461688986,0.05026765990744232,0.08067664784288528,0.0,0.08424367376128371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079412304121684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553900445086833,0.0,0.12532692334007636,0.0,0.17976625975086327,0.0,0.08982538877805657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08973330037727965,0.0,0.052129667134840185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0532736142248544,0.08534903804302374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388447538051732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876050637982654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424911751368275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loojsie,2020/02/21,"Does anyone know what I am experiencing? Hi everyone,

I was wondering if anyone has had a similar experience or knows what is up with my body..

A few years ago I was following a lot of classes in university. One of them was a class I had to retake because I failed the year before. So basically, I was terrified of failing again and very stressed which caused me to have some kind of 'panic attack'. However, it was not a real 'panic attack' as I wasnt sweating, hyperventilating, or anything like that. More so it was a sudden feeling of uneasyness that made me feel like I was stuck in my head/zoning out. The feeling also reminds me of deja vu, as during the 'attack' I am thinking of the most random things and tasting weird tastes as well, that I feel like I have experienced before (however I clearly haven't, neither can I recall any of those things after the attack). I also feel a weird tingling over my body and I need to sit down. It's in general a very scary feeling.

Sorry for this unclear explanation, I find the feeling very hard to describe. It is very unpleasant, and the first time it happened I did start panicking a bit because it was scary. At the time, I thought it must have been the stress. However, I just randomly had another one of the attacks on the bus ride home (have not had any for over two years) and again just now. I am not particularly stressed at the moment..

Does anyone have any clue what this might be? I also don't feel like I can relate to what the internet says about derealization/depersonalization.",5.295915254237286,6.35049705762712,6.482499999999997,74.85764830508477,68.2542372881356,9.289830508474578,31.021186440677965,9.516144504307137,2.8584203389830507,1212,48,224,25,20,408,153,295,0.175,0.748,0.077,-0.985,3,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,1,3,12,20,5,5,22,0,33,6,3,2,2,43,52,16,0,3,8,0,9,4,0,2,1,1,1,0,20,7,2,0,14,0,0,2,7,14,1,4,18,14,29,6,33,31,7,28,0,2,0,0,3,11,0,11,18,169,49,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339684941910622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19864443024004685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16891970163811826,0.08682259986580458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368621619106994,0.0,0.06813701568790861,0.0,0.0,0.470982490800465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094773509275026,0.0,0.14091272197591742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039571812053916,0.18394337918455453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505799723855018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14491697559905764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911856594917173,0.0,0.0809938966442924,0.0,0.0,0.3349277242430602,0.17745615201658774,0.0,0.0,0.07567733421554887,0.07042929732851587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321941269155252,0.0,0.07417217796074882,0.0,0.08497627712435901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305474970954714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622304169108735,0.09100898935454302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16180680845640036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039325884506324,0.0,0.07834698338230009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783729072147757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061394854133886935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11221430344861363,0.0,0.0,0.19429498049141986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424407176099853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584556512798519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268737312149117,0.05860598293628939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28453998560956223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110016749950264,0.05305464027827896,0.0,0.06573363347052806,0.09656222505074384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088317779448978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732733653852525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07444678409131493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979263403560117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599606828227082
mentalhealth,GoslingRyan20,2020/02/21,"Why doesn’t any politician or anybody with a platform ever address mental illness?? 

It’s the same cycle over and over again. Talking about the gap between the rich and poor. Unemployment, and drugs and the war on terror. But their is a war going on that’s a silent killer known as depression. Everybody says take these pills, exercise or eat better and it should help you. But the truth is you can do all of that and still feel a void in your life. I’ve always wondered why nobody with any platform ever addresses it. It seems to be brushed off as “he or she could have done something different to change their perspective on life” but the truth is some people can’t, and people that have never dealt with depression it seems show a lack of sympathy or remorse to people who are battling the thought of ending it all. I believe some people do not want to end their lives they just want the overwhelming feeling of sadness to stop. It’s a pretty big epidemic and yet it really doesn’t ever get addressed. Why?",5.108193930421912,6.577735559585495,5.132542561065879,82.81866580310881,69.05181347150258,8.001332346410067,28.811621021465587,8.418075326091056,2.0743755736491494,805,29,148,12,14,251,117,193,0.19,0.7170000000000001,0.09300000000000001,-0.9590000000000001,3,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,3,4,1,8,12,3,2,14,0,16,7,0,0,8,44,27,17,2,5,9,0,2,0,0,1,6,1,3,0,13,11,1,1,7,2,2,1,5,8,0,0,2,4,9,4,23,22,6,21,0,4,0,0,13,10,0,9,10,105,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968051263294773,0.0,0.0,0.17927723292210562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14851019438284815,0.0,0.1165795208423374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944263068802426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524342990081767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22706387009768336,0.0,0.0,0.13771846033469226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13489235418622322,0.0,0.0,0.15286337471927472,0.1348794966614239,0.0,0.0,0.2334976604281361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35770222846752986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13329909503354562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886781739023151,0.0,0.07491341553980001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835271377830901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18620945011237366,0.0,0.0,0.11639492535092825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283836315231434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166373656192372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3655352730297232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410308825642978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444396665573987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482445743623364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399985731890535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10147750953854692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526750752951804,0.11020311483405354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910836080109538,0.10594778140694107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046462650972344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549562458562727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35682719229090204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429475793283421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nnddggg,2020/02/21,"A disastrous consequence spreading like a virus. I was recently diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. It was traced back to some traumatic experience which i had experienced which resulted in a series of events which caused harm to my near and dear ultimately causing a great sense of guilt. They feel of guilt increases as they are not aware of it. This sense of guilt has completely isolated me. I cannot face people anymore, I cannot love or confess my feelings to anyone. This inability to express have made me more reserved and in order to vent out such strong emotions, it has lead to self-harm which really helps. 
The society i live in knows my situation and it’s really embarrassing as i am always treated like someone who should be empathised with. This is wrong. I don’t want that. I do not want any attention. I wish I could change my identity and start fresh. This current life is messed up. To be precise, i have messed it up and don’t wish to proceed any further because it’s beyond repair. I’ve tried to end this life but simply didn’t have the courage to do so. It’s difficult. 
I bring this up in this community so that i can get a proper response. I don’t even know what i am seeking out. I don’t even know if this post will be accepted but i just write this as i am stuck in this vast ocean. Please. Please help me out. There are many such circumstances which I haven’t typed and I don’t wish to. I might do that if necessary.",3.691525821596248,5.673747894366201,4.6475352112676065,82.81853286384978,73.5774647887324,8.67699530516432,27.678403755868544,9.2995712137729,2.4296600938967137,1158,45,229,28,24,376,151,284,0.11599999999999999,0.7440000000000001,0.139,0.8226,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,2,2,10,18,0,4,7,0,35,5,1,5,1,43,51,16,0,9,8,0,2,2,0,3,3,0,0,1,27,11,0,0,8,0,0,3,11,9,0,0,6,3,30,9,34,38,3,27,1,0,0,1,10,15,0,5,9,157,57,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577136784406856,0.0,0.0,0.17288757769513324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606571679438155,0.08888302816399002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774497933672233,0.0,0.07748922664769221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611679566722698,0.13447272837797666,0.0,0.13327955528540122,0.0,0.0,0.10149242805295647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290208849090534,0.0,0.0,0.14568687550312642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298930018468972,0.11258776212381948,0.0,0.0,0.1679189063844126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434463058300088,0.0,0.0,0.128548155689776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06641328592415928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401467302083377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040743455205112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20958022079223626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17957272236491262,0.12420570349693945,0.0,0.11224647085372637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147278827044762,0.12028099782319987,0.0,0.12887649211624766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348508457883098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812678956242083,0.11099349411798848,0.0,0.2790721666936753,0.0,0.0,0.12174276427707947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628685651615645,0.0,0.1255125129751726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261055448258927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288461881629766,0.0,0.0,0.1077056593903087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997393137128551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863039688514339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995357435308834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43853416934333705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389822750385475,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ARIS2510,2020/02/21,"I Fucked up I'm not even 19 and i have already been on a year of antidepressants and therpy. Last year was very bad for me and i just wanted to kill myself. I somehow talked to my parents and got help. Start of this year was good i felt good i didn't want to kill myself i had a good routine i was even working out. 
I started talking to my crush it was really nice and it really helped me out of those thoughts. And now i think i Fucked up any chance of relationship i had with her. I said too much when i shouldn't have said anything. 

Now i want to die but i don't want to kill myself.

I thought this would be a nice place to talk to people.",-0.4332035548032138,1.688849877697841,1.4362336013542103,99.32868810833686,89.79136690647482,4.421667371984765,16.80956411341515,5.900188976854957,-0.6778941176470594,499,12,121,4,17,163,76,139,0.196,0.6940000000000001,0.11,-0.8993,1,0,0,0,0,4,9.0,0,0,0,1,8,11,5,0,3,0,14,2,0,0,0,23,30,8,4,6,3,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,5,9,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,14,3,25,5,19,13,1,15,0,0,0,2,10,6,2,1,9,83,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13993449914319014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623299832937828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10435122314930163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587841312469566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316054777751801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750944130008122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217544505855295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344617570510875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190786785753692,0.10141901248851697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999190126838495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4208789352291355,0.0,0.0,0.10336449777022437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321761661730778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408039871808702,0.0,0.0,0.0879118950987955,0.0,0.13248615640030578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16247141517884522,0.0,0.0,0.13614308803177722,0.0,0.0,0.24124468309652425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17950906541843611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30576759942638165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125270164667737,0.0,0.20134093004941284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10462892175485154,0.2991758343558115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231688843065693,0.0,0.0,0.09007993955125136,0.0,0.0,0.2449783387168395
mentalhealth,_humanERROR_,2020/02/21,"It hurts so bad.  No matter what I do I can't make any friends and can't get anyone to be attached to me. I've been blessed with semi-decent looks, but my sheer awkwardness and literal autism makes me terrible at socialising.

Making this all worse is that I live with toxic parents.

My university class had an after exams party organised. I prepared 2 weeks in advance for this party and even bought a new outfit cause it would only be my second time drinking in my life. And then, today, 3 hours before the party was supposed to happen, everyone collectively decided to just not go. Some were staying home for the weekend, but most were hanging out with their little groups of friends.

I tried hinting and probing that I'd like to join, but there's only so much you can do with that unless you become intrusive. No one invited me to anything. So I bought my outfit for nothing, was stressing about the party nothing, was looking forward to the party for nothing, and got myself dressed and worked hard on makeup for nothing.

What's worse is that my parents were under the impression that I had a decent social life. From the start of the school year I faked hangouts so they wouldn't keep mocking me as an antisocial, stupid freak and all the insults you can think of, so at least I could concentrate on my studies better. And now all that effort, those lies have come crashing down.

I'm back to square zero. Nothing I do ever gets me anywhere. All the therapy sessions to work on myself and gradually make friends is useless. I wish someday I could work up the courage to just kill myself.",5.8801655629139065,6.907890096026492,6.084430463576162,78.33499006622519,66.91390728476821,8.159205298013246,32.318543046357625,8.238735603445708,2.515183576158941,1267,52,221,16,20,404,177,302,0.171,0.6890000000000001,0.14,-0.9187,2,0,1,0,0,1,31.0,0,3,2,6,13,20,4,2,14,0,26,3,0,5,5,44,45,21,1,5,7,2,1,1,3,2,2,0,1,0,13,16,1,1,2,3,2,5,6,12,0,3,12,4,32,8,38,27,8,31,1,2,3,0,13,13,0,2,15,163,45,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026446755630199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224716468348502,0.0,0.08502757964449173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945046163475593,0.08627196627788362,0.0,0.11411422187305607,0.08792187014477383,0.0,0.0,0.09138246754973887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10614312296458854,0.0,0.08900524270409138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16499303219372988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121905484369263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682451145827431,0.09346327739560796,0.0,0.09873135915453617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394856583723541,0.0,0.10796597965770116,0.0,0.05872191543713862,0.0,0.08263835249439322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136985794431672,0.0,0.09255880530268293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364328807895,0.0,0.10175420226989317,0.0,0.1106114304937246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183990867154353,0.1143136806190332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14596284930147885,0.050479321533776315,0.10355868301589947,0.09123776982425807,0.0,0.17353376713447352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758806624624036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595568199385191,0.0,0.0,0.0997918214766428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4957150875331412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001561873087238,0.15716646788477814,0.0,0.0,0.22946012270798294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10457030373435157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053267121378558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07313388811425975,0.11013058366396272,0.0,0.0,0.11835831104038667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816101521446393,0.0,0.0,0.06620641667715058,0.0,0.0,0.06024957358536366,0.0,0.0979399131354452,0.0,0.0,0.07015081708224287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288099334699107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11881852289966326,0.0,0.0,0.2256652489546368,0.0,0.21059377799145268,0.07339903647901118,0.0,0.0,0.06653784075796511
mentalhealth,BeaKidd48,2020/02/21,"Getting Diagnosis Reconsidered I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder II and ADHD when I was 23 years old. When I was 39 my diagnosis was changed to Bipolar I and CPTSD. I am now 42 years old. I have tried many medications over the years, but 10 years ago I began taking lithium and I have met success in taking lithium and a stimulant every day for the past decade. These medications didn't stop me from cycling, but they did lesson the symptoms. 

Three years ago the secret of my childhood sexual abuse came to light in a very public way. My abuse was by my elder brother, who is 20 years older than I am, and my brother was continuing to behave inappropriately towards me, even as an adult. When my brother's own family fell apart under abuse allegations, my secret became known and we've been engaged in a 3 year long court battle that has made the front page of local newspapers and has destroyed my family. During that time my elderly father died, and my mother took ill and I became her primary caregiver. 

During this process I was forced to face my ultimate fear; the disclosure of my family secret and the dismantling of my family. I faced that fear, as well as many other challenges over the past three years, and I did so with grace. I recognized finally that I held the power to control my life, and that I was far stronger than I'd ever given myself credit for. During this time of interrogations, and legal battles, and determining what to do with the remaining pieces of my biological family while caring for and raising my own family, I read a ton of books. I spent a lot of time decoding everything that had happened. 

Here's something I know. Over the past 3 years, when EVERYTHING in my world was destroyed and my worst fears became realized, I didn't get depressed. I didn't collapse under the weight. The lack of structure and routine didn't launch me into a tailspin. I was fine. When I felt something, I identified what it was and then moved on. 

I now believe that my diagnosis of Bipolar Disorder is incorrect. I believe that my behavior through the years was a direct correlation to the secret that I was carrying and my constant need to hide what was going on from my family and friends. The shame and guilt that I felt seemed tied to the burden of what I was carrying. I do believe that the CPTSD diagnosis is accurate, but the rest of it I feel is wrong. 

I had been a person in the past that was suicidally depressed for years because I felt ashamed and worthless and incapable of keeping my life together. It seems to me that everything falling apart should have made things worse, but it didn't. It had the total opposite effect on me. 

When I try to mention it to my doctor I'm always brushed aside. Nobody wants to believe the person labeled 'mentally ill' when they say that they're not actually. It seems impossible to shake a mental health diagnosis once it's received. 

How can someone get their diagnosis reconsidered? I live in a rural part of New York State.",6.16423599443138,7.204941433392541,6.9230099371129645,72.52979453698815,66.28241563055062,10.136220056646344,32.80058566559455,10.219675759033578,3.4927037492199124,2389,99,416,57,37,791,260,563,0.18,0.741,0.079,-0.9969,1,0,2,0,3,0,51.0,0,0,3,6,15,26,4,7,33,0,43,16,2,7,2,65,72,41,2,4,5,5,5,0,1,1,13,1,0,3,32,28,1,4,16,2,2,9,6,17,1,2,40,8,69,9,60,31,11,76,0,3,0,0,23,21,0,4,44,294,101,8,0.0,0.2183719068802991,0.059951868015447725,0.0,0.07383314088070006,0.0,0.10891715051412527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05111898651159996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03745031205077514,0.0,0.0,0.2768656141824553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026547291610802,0.06263725466896858,0.0,0.06499026842751868,0.0,0.0,0.06638959820498859,0.06890477194977844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039620605037557696,0.0,0.10582805125683163,0.062355408744488965,0.06376001159119203,0.0,0.14082006455169607,0.06288150415778583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04057735323590583,0.055571632411414135,0.051761784050200266,0.0,0.1656419199741523,0.0,0.4054093033734826,0.2073949533485376,0.0310634700615967,0.0,0.1769622050354344,0.06729923055070093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047464663290666086,0.0,0.0962920288320308,0.0,0.03491502534577458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054326921767065085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530271747431239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054606405720079035,0.0,0.0,0.03376316514304918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678696096618574,0.0,0.0,0.05424838447778575,0.05436819602968234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222998827257358,0.0,0.1162628947824606,0.0,0.12457124827703978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377894965826435,0.12382441203445485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529586774198838,0.0,0.04555340332328095,0.0,0.05933447419452525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893176190089226,0.06542645563405214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652830698514174,0.2345873017306781,0.0,0.1072856491192854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06145179956047345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04885571645440074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677848260982103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052053823844965284,0.0945915973002746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051362556624721736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720010938452015,0.0,0.0,0.06385466923678662,0.09238321078845996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04081479998202935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747003260087733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825673917362972,0.08342090131835986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05069045283403384,0.03623605755019831,0.04876438181101301,0.0,0.07481149160137257,0.05523759979032269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626076911958467,0.0,0.06716971887440139,0.0,0.43518461840789946
mentalhealth,throaway03827,2020/02/21,"I don't know how to handle my friends problems, I need help! Throwaway account on the off chance the person finds my actual account. 
My friend has borderline personality disorder, she's a lovely person with a huge heart. Problem is, I am at the end of my tether with the support I can offer. 
I made some clear boundaries with her in saying that I can't help her with her suicidal gestures. I'm always more than happy to listen, offer advice, comfort or console her but I made it clear that I personally can't handle ambiguous texts of threatening suicide when her symptoms flare up and she splits on me. I don't take it personally, I understand that she has a very severe form of her illness and her symptoms are very difficult to manage. I know that her distress is very real. I wish there was a way to lessen what she deals with. She has been in therapy for years and she has a crisis team. 
I've told her if she's worried about her safety she needs to call for help, of course I am still there to support her throughout that, before that and after that kind of call. For the past two months though she has messaged me ambigious texts that are extremely anxiety inducing every single night bar maybe a day here or there. All relating to how she has hurt herself or is going to, random messages just saying ""goodbye"" or ""something bad happened things are worse"" and then dead silence for a day or two. She doesn't have family and all of her other friends have left because they couldn't handle it either. I feel so bad for her and I don't want anything bad to happen but I just can't cope with feeling like I have to spend every day of my life talking her down from something to the point that I cant have plans because I feel guilty not answering my phone. 
I have told her a couple times that I need space for my own mental health and she's agreed but the second I'm back it's all just backlogged distress. It's been a few days now since I've replied because I can't do it but now I'm insanely anxious about being on my phone, dreading the next text. I've done everything I can do to help but it feels like she wants me to drop everything Im doing then and there to physically go over and stop her from doing something. I can't and I don't know what to do. I've already expressed my feelings on this in the most sensitive way I could, she agreed and apologised but it all gets thrown out the window. If anyone knows any way I can try to resolve this please help, I will be grateful for all and any advice.",4.376369047619047,5.372268501984126,5.010126984126983,84.79042857142859,70.32936507936508,7.744126984126985,27.89206349206349,7.957251820313856,1.66016015873016,1991,68,398,25,35,640,230,504,0.17600000000000002,0.691,0.133,-0.987,0,0,3,0,0,1,37.0,0,0,1,3,19,22,0,3,19,0,47,8,1,5,7,79,80,33,3,12,18,0,5,2,3,1,5,3,1,5,24,20,1,1,14,2,3,2,13,10,0,3,8,8,72,12,55,67,13,43,0,1,0,1,63,17,0,11,22,279,96,2,0.0,0.0,0.07113658919537112,0.0,0.0,0.1424674738685664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044323686154134,0.0,0.06065583048425462,0.0,0.0,0.09914440759591134,0.0,0.055765717547662116,0.0823524354993002,0.0,0.05097101417077438,0.0,0.05998771004997973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05605300392896144,0.18259690750310248,0.13331131548267994,0.0,0.06202965761637246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488712061081567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05820202231374243,0.08065872752710354,0.0,0.18804916660829052,0.0751532180792195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354584614359689,0.0,0.0,0.07459855513734842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456477166913126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283709882233634,0.0,0.1310295698286682,0.0,0.06872044912197611,0.0,0.18429361602086616,0.10415472496882733,0.0,0.0,0.06662619336120057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895925175849635,0.0,0.038085477147812456,0.0,0.08285766222091215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12892448705674958,0.07759981135792751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748570211547981,0.0,0.08638284998130577,0.24430535111080065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803734327631055,0.0,0.07874086264035315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591061587263097,0.16024831173552062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792023948631506,0.0,0.05148904107688093,0.07122721630672786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579204889738408,0.13795309568458308,0.0,0.0,0.0732344564052723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346265114694776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058185389504548164,0.0,0.0,0.16215576824850453,0.0,0.0,0.07752638622125661,0.0684085431210315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958807567666579,0.0,0.3182525999853259,0.0,0.08001860229698482,0.0689108715983515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13950444781355364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297231678920615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159406419285127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823524354993002,0.0,0.06030084035700488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835814682412675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05821533779276285,0.060944841446731214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15947414929385875,0.1654444492552192,0.0,0.151535007133828,0.05480918887060116,0.058591544796188576,0.0,0.0,0.08336364212097967,0.0,0.048429277610911814,0.0,0.07162056259694831,0.0,0.04250660745590035,0.0,0.0,0.13931169558314976,0.0,0.049492022382544285,0.0,0.14241881797936834,0.07588795603299926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18044204653237134,0.08599263460294806,0.17358584032923335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382751961273333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403005977932295,0.07428788720848566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046943035605966583
mentalhealth,hippiedippie5,2020/02/21,"Podcast on Mental Illness - Guest Speaker Megan McCollough shares story of Homicidal Ideation & her trip to a Mental Facility - Episode #THREE https://anchor.fm/samantha-weber3/episodes/THREE-eav967

Guest Speaker Megan McCollough shares her story of Homicidal Ideation and how the darkness landed her in a mental facility. We discuss mental illness along with it’s comorbidity  of substance abuse. 

This is safe for work however there is profanity. So in some cases it may not be. 

Podcast: WebWonders
Available: Spotify, Anchor, Apple",11.941153846153846,15.468555166666668,9.146666666666668,52.64000000000002,55.02564102564102,11.353846153846154,45.051282051282044,11.20814326018867,6.504112820512821,445,25,46,12,6,130,56,78,0.133,0.7829999999999999,0.084,-0.6486,1,0,0,0,1,0,22.0,1,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,1,0,9,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,2,2,0,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,4,3,10,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,2,0,31,7,1,0.0,0.26930015642415434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462674066814375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9162149291012855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654690117461625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,recia2,2020/02/21,"Meditation Habits Survey Hey, everyone, I'm designing an app for meditators to use alongside their instructors or coaches. It would be a huge help if you guys can take my quick 13 question quiz. 

[https://forms.gle/agfMfJc9ghVZkBbQA](https://forms.gle/agfMfJc9ghVZkBbQA)",13.030833333333328,18.31410597222223,8.89777777777778,47.30000000000004,58.72222222222222,10.266666666666667,34.0,10.125756701596842,4.735633333333333,229,9,26,6,4,64,36,36,0.0,0.865,0.135,0.6124,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,6,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,3,1,14,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4106854081268308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255624121788876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880810327044601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4814662627835436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32315067311758383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3712029566515818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053124509844642,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymous11072003,2020/02/21,"Helpppp pleaseeee Ok so I’m at college doing vet nursing and I love it, its what I’ve always wanted to do so why do I still feel so shit? At the start of the year I pretended to be ok because I thought after a while I wouldn’t have to pretend anymore, I did this for a few weeks and then shit started happening again at home and I gave up trying to pretend to be ok. A couple of my lecturers noticed the bruising and asked me if I was ok, obviously I made stuff up and said I just fell over/fell off my horse. I told one of my best friends at college because I trusted her not to tell anyone but one of my lecturers was walking behind us and I didn’t realise and she told the safeguarding lead and I had to go and sit in her office for hours and it was awful, I hated it. Anyway so now I’m pretending to be ok again because I don’t want anyone high up getting involved but I’m feeling so horrible and suicidal again and I really want to tell one of my lecturers that I trust but I don’t know how to start or what to say and I’m scared that she’ll tell someone higher up and it’ll get back to my mum and everything will just get worse so now I really don’t know what to do, I’m running out of options and truthfully I really just want to die so everything will stop, I just want it to stop hurting :(",1.3278571428571408,2.9769317857142887,3.4858571428571423,90.01914285714287,79.35714285714286,6.765714285714287,25.128571428571423,7.699297019823105,1.2471757142857145,1020,39,228,16,25,349,131,280,0.18899999999999997,0.6829999999999999,0.128,-0.9846,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,1,0,0,2,20,16,3,1,7,6,22,3,2,3,2,46,53,31,2,7,10,1,2,0,1,5,0,2,1,0,13,17,0,2,5,4,0,5,6,5,0,3,12,4,34,11,36,33,2,36,0,1,0,1,18,12,2,3,18,159,47,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296814701207592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080594239266076,0.15624815292944508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044522838713266,0.0,0.0,0.08591332223353026,0.0,0.20432835355183615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725353560746456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362690245405655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595789618709472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008310860391707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298789152388275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632216903760394,0.0,0.17512263257636915,0.0,0.06349862215166857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880229625460103,0.0,0.0,0.11031004947798018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11804867180503895,0.11207410281646743,0.0,0.11003135020684268,0.0,0.11960906551311935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280755604963772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084050989468292,0.10572144159912658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720512184150154,0.0,0.0,0.2271330193545671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21473091940970826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628062900992356,0.0888520242607381,0.11186102473991112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293780754145949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946682999409874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23724878999328855,0.0,0.08922756541401501,0.1868222373352272,0.0,0.0,0.12790389390290588,0.12221427056402945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29297031888653857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870098365041612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135252306674437,0.0,0.07585720244947809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13439719670018035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32950566466144904,0.0,0.08962290894154093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008187692126742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138622151255156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719503302578884
mentalhealth,HugeTigerKiss,2020/02/21,"The end is near. I want to die
I’m going to die
I’ve only got a bit over a week left
I yearn for the end 
Feeling it in my bones
Looking forward to seeing the light
Feeling the water in my lungs
Embracing the darkness",0.051250000000003126,1.941659958333336,2.65816666666667,93.1035,84.83333333333334,4.673333333333334,22.1,5.6839178017228535,0.16574500000000025,170,6,38,1,5,59,33,48,0.196,0.7190000000000001,0.086,-0.8176,0,0,0,0,0,1,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,0,1,3,2,0,0,4,9,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,5,4,0,8,8,1,10,0,1,2,0,0,6,0,0,4,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846129906449795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5411234882246098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4617993307495574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636319043331856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14815979353716258,0.0,0.20850275663993514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832474428082901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21891934994774467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982713886240738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20774130870252805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15376551361684304,0.0,0.20911495769565613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Goddess_of_Wisdom,2020/02/21,"I say I'm pretty good. But I'm not good. Last month I really started taking step to focus on my mental and physical health. I started using talk space, working less and walking more. I also moved out of my mom's house. I have a lot of psychological trauma. Nothing too intense but over the years it has definitely shaped me as a person. I have a lot of doubts and stress about if I'm doing and saying the right thing.

I'm having a hard time talking to my therapist about it all.

The catalyst for me to move out was an incident with my mom. My dad passed away in November right before Thanksgiving. I was worried about my mom losing the house to my dad's divorce lawyer. I was working 50 hours a week and getting chewed out by my GM for not getting work done. And I was stressed beyond belief. I was having panic attacks and according to my fitbit my resting heart rate was in the 80s. I had tried to talk to my mom but she blew me off and made every conversation about her. So it got to the point where I just shut down. She confronted me in the kitchen one morning and asked me what was wrong. I first told her nothing and brushed her off. But when she pushed I told her I was extremely stressed out. She asked me about what and I told her everything. Life. She said I was ungrateful and that there are a lot of people with things a lot worse than me.

That last sentence has defined my life. I don't complain about anything. I put up with whatever life throws at me because I know it could be worse and I honestly do not take anything I have for granted. I appreciate all my opportunities and experiences. However, I still get stressed. I worry about doing the right thing and making sure everything is taken care of.

My therapist checks in with me weekly and generally I am managing. But I have a hard time telling someone details about things when they don't ask specific questions about what's going on. If you've ever seen the show Patriot on Amazon the lead guy John has a lot of shit he is dealing with and when someone asks how he's doing he just says pretty good. And he absolutely really is not good. That's how I feel.",2.554481132075473,4.733201146226417,3.850603773584904,86.33543396226419,77.63207547169812,6.9758490566037725,24.98679245283019,7.993328176185818,1.4877209433962264,1682,61,337,29,40,550,206,424,0.142,0.7509999999999999,0.107,-0.9477,1,0,0,0,1,0,36.0,0,0,1,7,25,21,3,6,20,0,33,8,2,6,4,62,62,33,0,3,13,6,3,0,0,0,4,4,1,2,14,27,2,0,4,1,1,10,6,13,0,2,19,9,62,8,53,41,10,54,1,1,1,0,43,27,1,9,17,237,76,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05371637017815547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055149605061354,0.0,0.25118208141559417,0.07641634792184701,0.06310906692238634,0.0,0.0,0.040946624330235264,0.0,0.0571573030816137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848498705511978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05363032389963344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925002375281153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873892891374704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060759727520641675,0.05659419668633831,0.0,0.12073735569634818,0.06570581610154261,0.0,0.0,0.033963515104525915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057135347849132476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052817270316908,0.0,0.038174646565714905,0.2253583248940639,0.053722530604838635,0.0,0.0,0.06650953580254627,0.0,0.0,0.12034347492486745,0.0,0.0,0.07139929399089788,0.0,0.07959758165958107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614959132911273,0.1550118971859578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036915250197054494,0.10950614206667388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423339176437509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514681163410454,0.0,0.2855305592207207,0.0,0.06355852348771751,0.044836951866341936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769224880707161,0.0,0.0,0.3146779640213249,0.05361499757747162,0.14278360955299899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890416208665958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04551659255720527,0.0,0.0,0.07881032266967535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0465676933652765,0.05865084868394161,0.0,0.0,0.0634980060332547,0.0,0.0,0.13667346390955246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675250881407852,0.07524653664398248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606251786710327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720901864038083,0.06389470057389404,0.1602504672322031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894973986963877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382700187075853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508750898042724,0.0,0.05364259346389178,0.0,0.3077751574311983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330757291256585,0.0,0.10100798683459067,0.1619677495875018,0.05871013679123596,0.0,0.0,0.15598067811139602,0.1785008658632267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783355297671933,0.0,0.0,0.1925533957443096,0.0,0.04560448392180767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058013902611895714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776053895666056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467031696237717,0.136430176356153,0.13690532714942505,0.0,0.0734405962062124,0.0,0.04325571697163475
mentalhealth,ThemsSharkQueen,2020/02/21,"I want people to notice I want people to notice just how not okay I am. But I can't tell them because I don't want to be a burden.
My parents and friends all generally know I'm not okay. My mum walked in on my crying alone in my room and tried to talk to me. I told her a few things but I don't know how to express myself vocally very well. It happens often enough that when she does see me I just tell her I'm fine, I can deal with it, so go away.
Obviously I am not fine, cannot deal with it, and desperately want her to stay. But I know it's a lot to have to deal with and I don't want to burden anyone.
But nights like tonight, after having a horrible day at work and at home, and after a month of feeling terrible constantly, I really needed her to notice. But everytime I get quiet and don't answer people's questions, she assumes I'm just pissed off and in a bad mood.

Is there anyway to have someone notice? Or am I doomed to continue like this as there is no way I am going to approach her.",2.6693055555555567,3.241211393518519,4.721370370370373,86.8606666666667,73.9537037037037,7.611851851851853,23.659259259259247,7.793537801064563,0.9649948148148146,775,20,176,10,15,269,110,216,0.193,0.7,0.107,-0.9784,1,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,1,12,15,1,0,6,2,17,1,1,2,2,43,36,19,0,6,12,2,1,2,1,0,0,1,2,0,7,11,0,0,7,0,0,4,10,6,1,0,1,3,31,8,29,34,4,24,1,1,1,0,20,9,1,5,11,124,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904769762561533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037177320004142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079940154640996,0.0,0.09597374426504916,0.07006901855418679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12421402476228682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262609885273362,0.07412960687058619,0.3555077820393612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058858916188053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876825650079595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058119325071375336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880573193282844,0.0,0.06005368700892848,0.0,0.13065106402617255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164492312179678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529857094990024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18951125226798374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231202219156572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772158940609334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174749619749556,0.0,0.0,0.08522979083158969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786750081620493,0.0,0.0,0.5234596895181414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276321155406903,0.0,0.0,0.23906385132909636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287639960188926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363630408962997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159577769446267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739198818595028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12251540017391906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238792726434368,0.2009328842820544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636392918031892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983426741332207,0.0,0.07803967927367593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484113978362786,0.3389858254549408,0.09123748740108556,0.0,0.0,0.10334878917295312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368086732801994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clarisseleynes,2020/02/21,Is social withdrawal a coping mechanism? I just think the easiest way not to lose your mind is self isolation. I am too sensitive about what people say. It it okay?,2.1966129032258053,5.038922129032258,4.180887096774196,78.89133064516129,85.7741935483871,9.551612903225807,23.87903225806452,9.516144504307137,3.2075741935483872,130,5,23,5,4,44,28,31,0.079,0.674,0.247,0.5744,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,2,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4370563554928551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3944622232484418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708392532345273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106740155326728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4075507995402625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3982357277697738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503235883215019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100932175733389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zaid_ata,2020/02/21,"Social anxiety Hello , I am 19 years old and I think I have social anxiety. 

I feel nervous in the university, I regret most of the things I say wether they’re right or wrong. 

Sometimes I feel people judge me , I keep wondering what do they think about me , and this social anxiety comes as episodes every once and a while.


Can anyone help ? It’s really depressing .

Also I don’t think a therapist is an option this period for me cause it’s a bit expensive",1.912921348314608,4.460252258426968,4.0562808988764045,81.83296067415732,82.59550561797751,8.054382022471911,21.259550561797766,8.841846274778883,1.9285856179775287,357,11,67,10,10,122,62,89,0.191,0.777,0.032,-0.8832,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,1,6,0,6,0,0,1,0,16,14,7,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,1,6,0,1,1,1,4,0,0,0,3,13,0,5,14,2,7,0,2,0,0,7,2,0,4,4,43,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329377716994268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3815071055206438,0.0,0.0,0.11623511682378344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18148515903907794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17076875406641948,0.0,0.14319641232930133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14317764123764942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400598434638914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16810644509675388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11142356686056076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775697510469452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17443527807937695,0.17703445317138608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524615994398553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064941591748454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196346375097302,0.0,0.13219644810316689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5083658055085126,0.0,0.0,0.16441029738721782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19301121527313306,0.11043890007633826,0.3195493114781761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802743626280913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18175146942265896,0.0,0.10704965001169514
mentalhealth,bhlogan2,2020/02/21,"My family doesn't talk to me I have fought with depression for a few years but I have never tried to let that put me down, I was fighting day by day to be out there as much as I possibly could. I had better times, I had worse times, but I still fought. I got to see a therapist recently for only a few times because my depression had gotten very bad and talking to her helped me a lot, although right before evolving, my parents cut off the sessions because I didn't ""change"" as they wanted me to. They straight up told me the sessions were to see if I could be diferent that the person I am now, not because of my ""sadness"". I've gotten so used to these kinds of comments that I hadn't realized how unhealthy they are. My family is toxic, like really bad. I don't remember a single day in the last ten years where my mother wasn't complaining about virtually anything. She's a bully that has created an unhealthy enviorment and she should have gone to a therapist herself like yesterday. But she didn't and now we all have to pay for her own traumas (her family was equally toxic).

Anyway I recently heard my mother complain about me being too ""confused"" about life and how she wasn't proud of me. That was when I was feeling down. I didn't eat anything for an entire day, nor did I speak to anyone else for the rest of it. My family didn't care, not even a single ""Hey, how are you doing?"" for the last week or so. They don't talk to me and I don't want to talk to them. They only talk to me to either hurt me or ask me unavoidable questions. I feel isolated and broken. My friends don't care either but they are friends whom I don't expect anything from anyway, my family hurts a little bit more. I can't sleep and I have had very toxic thoughts lately. Help",3.1187230646448536,4.550454491620116,4.492517956903434,85.62621508379891,73.91620111731844,7.572386272944933,25.355546687948927,8.192908349453996,1.5063747805267362,1380,45,282,22,28,458,169,358,0.188,0.7140000000000001,0.098,-0.9893,2,1,0,0,2,0,40.0,1,1,7,2,18,24,4,1,17,0,43,3,1,4,2,41,62,25,0,7,11,3,2,2,2,1,1,2,0,1,8,10,1,0,6,0,1,2,18,15,0,1,26,6,60,9,41,29,14,33,0,5,2,0,43,10,0,6,23,217,68,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059608789585697,0.08879546391061552,0.2139463345979876,0.0,0.08101727483777672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447183062318307,0.15848505904621804,0.0,0.07374298208935393,0.0,0.0,0.07664549965446704,0.0946124626484252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17671537674141605,0.0,0.09167690881720944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13838511621620275,0.0,0.0,0.2235592917645395,0.0,0.14928371339465699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867686485638313,0.07239498376659842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05723943603649874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084861212773047,0.0,0.08763782582492853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390969798473507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931152098850106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617542848756204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18554693443952855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902451408213112,0.0,0.14128219908427828,0.097758514770667,0.0,0.0,0.08861777019206205,0.06121193602926237,0.0846773549656865,0.08685809451350131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736769363820808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370654409004542,0.0,0.06683907970480317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182071772574927,0.0,0.0,0.09622789922014384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566991881771629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09769838783238598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711924980501344,0.09708127754208333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05551789860148279,0.0,0.1711365471086585,0.0,0.09817115630943662,0.0740088775451214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381167933734272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867245898436645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920838800574465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3482781789007068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124253126201228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879995060366156,0.15159993361654325,0.0,0.0,0.0828092582403208,0.0,0.058837811788252516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074848146266347,0.0,0.1430104578672904,0.10223099009445093,0.0,0.06951503190128992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831598539124214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161497796167072
mentalhealth,Gemini606,2020/02/21,"I just really wanna beat someone up because I find it amusing and get's out steam. There something wrong with me I just really wanna hurt someone because I feel pleasure from doing it and to get out my aggression.

Doesn't matter who they are I wanna hurt them on so many levels and can't stop thinking about in my head also don't feel empathy towards these people. Even if they died it would be disappointed.

I mostly like this at stressful time but even at okay times I still feel like this.",4.678468335787926,6.007754608247424,5.2637702503681885,82.00505154639177,69.9278350515464,7.604712812960236,27.259204712812963,7.957251820313856,1.7166565537555232,395,13,73,5,7,127,68,97,0.157,0.7140000000000001,0.128,-0.2314,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,3,1,9,11,1,1,0,1,7,1,1,0,0,22,13,7,1,5,4,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,1,5,1,0,0,3,6,0,0,0,3,13,5,15,11,1,13,0,3,0,0,4,9,0,2,6,56,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148468244851423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263471424721407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19268058979175012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24524676701164785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28161825490980563,0.13263197662351872,0.0,0.0,0.16968531620704805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19399416075558928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905356022831733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974950571770172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814033207034948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882250409787436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287098081607432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378707074369524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3146097759100569,0.14292629739482685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14826433123549349,0.15521590189031093,0.2126671873077477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896023433157947,0.0,0.0,0.21651385928476666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318839927832674,0.20298460941079247,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fitsportmom,2020/02/21,"Bi polar elderly father My bipolar elderly father was kicked out of his assisted living facility due to behavioral issues and noncompliance (he wont wear a diaper- hes incontinent) and he refused to be admitted in the facility that they sent him to- he threaten the staff...so they wanted to release him to family and I said hell no!
He was homeless for the past week - living in ERs.
 The hospital, they are refusing to admit him for psych, saying he’s not manic. They agreed to admit him on the medical floor and The social worker is working with us to find him a place to live. Another assisted living facility or nursing home.
My dad is belligerent and being a toddler and tantruming saying he doesn’t want his freedom taken away and he will not go to a nursing home...If he refuses the facility they offer where do we stand he cannot live with family I cannot take care of him I have small children!",3.1773022312373196,5.6389026666666675,5.491419878296149,73.9220385395538,76.93103448275863,8.921703853955377,28.051386071670045,9.478462496947786,3.1708814063556456,720,31,123,21,17,252,105,174,0.109,0.831,0.059000000000000004,-0.8698,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,2,0,5,2,1,3,2,0,11,0,15,4,1,0,0,23,26,8,0,2,3,3,0,0,0,2,2,3,1,1,1,11,0,3,4,0,0,2,7,2,1,0,5,3,21,1,21,17,0,15,1,0,0,1,41,9,1,1,3,80,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734800578444022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098363226013344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299326548740408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28292105306465626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714951683437304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528093656812072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010391132705561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15662067881267866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6625160643242886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116679208644107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14324652925536013,0.0,0.0,0.15677778399814635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427387126505877,0.238662937499031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15296436756005927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282430216198368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805002757279537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17701519015458572,0.0,0.12036679464064833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924339257025273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angsvs,2020/02/21,"Being called a drama queen Hi! I have anxiety issues, and my boyfriend knows about this. Every time we have a disagreement, he calls me a drama queen, calls me immature and unable to have a disagreement like a normal person, which makes me feel like shit. Am I overreacting? And how can I explain to him how this makes me feel? 
Thanks in advance for your replies!",3.2368487394957985,5.883408147058827,3.642689075630255,86.24852941176474,77.82352941176471,6.8268907563025225,22.94957983193277,7.957251820313856,1.3399638655462185,286,9,53,5,7,89,45,68,0.156,0.735,0.11,-0.5178,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,1,0,3,3,4,1,0,5,0,6,1,1,4,0,13,13,5,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,11,3,5,12,0,3,0,0,0,0,10,1,1,0,3,35,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16977209174128224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6798310101388328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869814657425933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22442399425550885,0.1585433336133687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316321432794472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196422944838872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168427850133331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29627345099935026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21743947586448825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19377643461838848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278029228835711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043188127067702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940630871370046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,desvolack,2020/02/21,"Mental health in Virginia Struggling with the mental health system in Virginia, would love to chat with someone directly who has dealt with it/other frustrating mental health systems in the past.  Need to vent/get advice.",7.777477477477479,10.563822783783783,5.803783783783783,75.41936936936938,64.4054054054054,7.095495495495496,31.25225225225225,7.793537801064563,2.565781981981982,181,7,24,2,3,52,26,37,0.136,0.764,0.1,-0.128,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,3,0,6,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,13,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19493889697132374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422506561280727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6361442464562259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18004712364552167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6031156920654084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791898689363706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19043536530002686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690268635351775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20854981022464508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171166541897073,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nnihil,2020/02/21,"from one side of the spectrum to another so this is my first post, I'm kinda new to reddit so if this is the wrong place to ask this I apologize. 

I've bee in therapy for a few years, mainly for depression but it's about to end soon and I do feel quite stable and ready to stay on my own feet and be confident. 
I've been reading about Carl Jungs theories lately and a lot of it makes sense to me and I try to apply what he says in my inner and outer world, which helps me be very aware of myself.
But it has come to a point where I'm not sure how healthy it is. Like I said in the title I feel like I'm switching sides a lot, like almost going from one extreme to another. that mostly applies to fields of interest (but also and definitely for interpersonal relationships). for a few weeks I'll be completely obsessed with art and music, after that it'll be video games and then something new that I've never tried before like coding and than back to art and music for example. Whenever I shift between these fields I feel like a different person and completely distant from that other side of the spectrum, almost as if that means nothing to me anymore but I know I'll eventually switch back to that side and be completely in love with it again. 
My therapist told me that I have minor symptoms of borderline (i.e. unclear or shifting self image) and I'm always aware of those shifts and situations in which my feelings feel like they're pulled or stretched in two opposite directions. there's so much contradiction going on inside that it feels like my body can't stand this excessive amount of negative energy. It's not like I'm switching personalities but to a degree I identify with the things I love and do (my fields of interest, like most people I guess) so when I'm turning away from one side of the spectrum I feel like I'm distant from a certain part of me. 
I've been thinking for the longest time how to make peace with all of it and not feel like I'm abandoning a part of me, even if it's temporarily. 

I'm sorry if this doesn't make sense I just really don't know what to do and hope to find people who maybe feel the same and exchange methods of coping with it.",6.727424061941633,5.909868015981736,7.247002183839588,77.0236777843955,65.18721461187215,10.631089934484812,32.285487393289664,9.971965246562196,2.8938184236648805,1733,58,347,33,23,572,206,438,0.057999999999999996,0.753,0.18899999999999997,0.9966,1,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,2,18,22,0,1,17,0,19,5,2,5,4,75,55,40,0,5,15,0,9,11,0,1,1,2,0,3,33,25,0,1,14,5,1,4,8,4,0,5,4,11,28,18,62,45,14,44,0,2,0,2,15,21,0,16,27,228,61,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15568075062752665,0.0,0.0,0.062164652701888916,0.06468174855988773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16302385405351408,0.0,0.0,0.077092233578158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267173305060698,0.0,0.0730345928914947,0.11954683588416574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614676091591283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634606268598845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696182075877148,0.24451101065043315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695304297967634,0.0,0.0,0.08121653162977227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688501384547588,0.0,0.0,0.05134323542652843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3537463724010401,0.3332034040902343,0.0,0.0,0.07104838318239365,0.06612135265772902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835718563649649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563386819396135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052104132995049485,0.0,0.0,0.07720839644302213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544224787684747,0.0,0.08768846771337149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.417751347635516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217503707613126,0.1403177478585546,0.0,0.15566615158869807,0.0,0.07809525741067089,0.08467620554888447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05714417048658595,0.0,0.059954025451752574,0.15015389790298522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458883056848753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802574666387528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835886304402697,0.0,0.10778332473245587,0.1357504100525009,0.08121653162977227,0.0,0.07348470269357411,0.0,0.07444864360234635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268074280172537,0.07775603780448964,0.0,0.049799032549245635,0.0,0.0,0.08345830021590232,0.0,0.0,0.07394378766647514,0.061817993334035135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109456005216198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737739877748438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05984420202722659,0.0,0.0870179700430326,0.0,0.08285516874419091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732643190605904,0.08079643087234126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889674901253533,0.0902563282928532,0.05164368095131674,0.04980945022929651,0.0,0.0,0.0453279045665709,0.0,0.0,0.07427912529777347,0.0,0.10555392686607623,0.08455335958302825,0.07593580123455071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06413951739543602,0.0,0.0,0.062354329387779225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499102121452434,0.0,0.05005879239409939
mentalhealth,KP_PP,2020/02/21,"What do you do on a good day? Long ass post: unloading a little

TLDR: Title


We have our dark days, and we all know what that can feel like, when that Big black dog sits on our shoulder. 

He becomes a friend after a while. He can keep you down, or be used as a tool to temper expectations, and become armour. 

I normally have a Husky who keeps him away, most of the time. Today she is away (doggy day care, -she fucking loves it; -it’s basically play-school for dogs), so I don’t have her support. 

But what about when the Big black dog vanishes for a while, because of external events?

Today I had some excellent news. After being out of work for nearly 2 months the negativity has been following me closer and closer, and new its had cause to lift, and I’m scared it’s temporary.

Today I heard back from a job I want; that pays very well; is practically on my doorstep; and the employers are *very* interested in me based off my CV *alone*. In the interview, I’ll get to smash it by explaining the engineering experience I have with relevant equipment systems. 

So far so good, but There’s that gnawing at the back of my mind that says: “Don’t be too happy; then you don’t get hurt”

Since coming out of the army with a medical discharge, things have been hard. Civilian life is...

different. 

And the army doesn’t teach you how to go back to the real world. Even when it has been 1/3rd of your life. Seeing friends with body parts missing, kinda sticks, regardless of the services you get to deal with it. 

I’ve learnt to analyse, and was given some tools to deal and cope, and they work best if you stay level. 

Calm and collected under pressure, would be a massive strength I have. An example; I’ve SCUBA dived for fun for years, traveled the world seeing the most unbelievable shit, and had the biggest emergencies thrown at me without being phased. 

Once I pulled panicked divers back to dry land textbook style, with 30m of unbreathable water above me, and a boat miles away in a fast drift current; and not bat an eyelid at any of it.
The most calm moments I’ve known in my life, were during the most dangerous moments of it. Solo diving was near zen like, and it’s arguably the most dangerous diving out there. You are 100% reliant on equipment, regardless of how well trained you are, and as an engineer I very well know, failures can happen at any time spontaneously, because of things you can’t even see. 

I can usually recognise and deal well with dark days and thoughts, even meditating occasionally. I try to recognise negativity in my thoughts or feelings, and calm myself during panic-esq 
I practice mindfulness of my actions and words, and I don’t rock the boat. 

But good days scare me. When things look good, and a positive path is laid out for you...

It feels like a trap



Writing this is a cathartic exercise, please feel free to respond as you want, downvote or upvote, whatever feels right, or not at all",4.857688172043011,6.187740602150543,5.224335125448029,82.45316935483874,69.50179211469533,8.447383512544802,28.645340501792113,8.841846274778883,2.148586953405018,2288,82,444,40,40,727,286,558,0.09300000000000001,0.746,0.161,0.9886,4,1,0,0,0,0,90.0,4,12,1,5,24,36,5,3,36,0,43,12,4,4,2,86,77,45,0,8,11,0,6,3,2,1,5,2,0,0,24,35,1,2,11,3,2,7,11,10,4,0,13,14,46,27,71,58,11,83,1,2,6,3,36,39,3,13,36,291,70,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779681497719672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238697806023513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121862179643528,0.23154498867454126,0.0,0.09178088853407756,0.16628333975370002,0.0,0.0,0.07900249888044836,0.0,0.0,0.08361993840677863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675373814053768,0.07733406357567603,0.0,0.06484769719978023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427492679950533,0.232833431876306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865235728456425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491666689974409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363901520940873,0.0,0.0,0.190321036533663,0.10756116052170477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632343583364027,0.069595836977222,0.11799324866733495,0.0,0.04278378301735277,0.2525676735952029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665705154117581,0.08013775436901359,0.06743676211745092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058959600097654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470452477961463,0.1338259726606859,0.0,0.0,0.08274465890565821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15951905246842865,0.11033511032228883,0.07545108484170646,0.0,0.06662109160577571,0.06321686702482428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794381277106121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583743204894887,0.0,0.0,0.15202418744527854,0.0,0.060088373546084775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727066139648242,0.0,0.0,0.0737591478436134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017153800464022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832573574250728,0.0,0.08152171228220521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263565314933541,0.0,0.0,0.07209814551864473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856859704415004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642893460876974,0.0,0.05986627107505028,0.1507383199320437,0.076188134391128,0.17996702471862944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727460435311298,0.062273011341297375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08023925922677617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542769888304008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003954850679696,0.0,0.0,0.1195290073810031,0.0877936172202571,0.0,0.21407203568542751,0.0,0.0,0.05111068523896451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06501839426501313,0.08291110656181098,0.18634349942109815,0.08880506935216134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27074572742528913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256795311760493,0.0,0.10961055991855352,0.0,0.0,0.05347728232336749,0.0,0.0,0.04847833249716394
mentalhealth,syrsly0019,2020/02/21,"Social media & mental health. Discussion. Hey everyone, I’ve been thinking more lately about social media and it’s effects on our daily life, it became so ingrained in our mind that some people don’t know the difference between real life and social media, do you think a person should hop off social media and focus on their reality?,  or you think it is a tool and we just need to learn more how to use it not abuse it for the sake of our mental health?",4.0846709470304985,5.7879050112359565,5.1460995184590725,80.81314606741573,71.92134831460675,6.8834670947030485,21.703049759229536,7.447530270364453,0.9348735152487953,362,8,64,4,7,119,63,89,0.0,0.9570000000000001,0.043,0.5759,0,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,4,2,1,1,4,0,0,0,4,0,5,4,0,3,0,21,11,7,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,7,0,10,9,3,5,0,0,0,0,14,4,0,2,1,44,13,1,0.0,0.18302176469692835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16736824796782832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613883378292612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760276419911306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32838890576355145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489270650031819,0.0,0.17424895851952474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182135464534118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31133898210901306,0.0,0.15597072846062424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453759391423758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709009160584444,0.134877300214471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758207487006226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6298511025749416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969345360870595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13341253766614514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-LuttBicker,2020/02/21,"Mild heat stroke related to poor mental health Some advice would be nice

Suffered a mild heat stroke in 2007 deployed in Kuwait. I was young and felt invincible and didn’t drink enough water. It fucked me up for the next ten years. I was fraud to go out in the sun and let’s just say any physical activity because anxiety inducing and I felt the same feelings from when I had the heat incident before because all I kept think of was getting dehydrated again. After awhile my body has slowly gotten better and my mind me tally stronger. But I still get dizzy or that anxiety feeling sometimes when I try to start working out. I have no trouble going outside and sweating or doing manual labor in the heat but for some reason trying to physically work out kicks that 2007 incident into overdrive. Has anyone else experienced this and if so how did you overcome it. The mental block is real and so are the physical side effects. What the he’ll can I do to overcome that. Is my body permanently screwed because of this one incident?",6.1097343378271205,7.281681242268043,6.470206185567013,75.25405630452023,66.4742268041237,9.26819984139572,32.44885011895322,9.466822959209583,3.0787467089611424,827,34,143,16,13,267,128,194,0.126,0.8290000000000001,0.045,-0.9325,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,4,8,6,2,0,9,0,18,10,3,4,1,36,32,18,0,2,6,0,6,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,8,12,2,2,8,1,1,2,2,4,0,2,10,8,15,2,20,18,5,21,0,1,0,2,3,10,2,5,9,99,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567039009253288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013733460545061,0.0,0.22807771088725046,0.0,0.0,0.10423386217290047,0.15274078687628725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27261677073078744,0.0,0.12684838408266158,0.0,0.0,0.1318411257982057,0.0,0.3311684010511517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460327620892843,0.0,0.0,0.12452963585546775,0.0,0.0,0.1540301225880292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15074948524511625,0.0,0.28626294555452536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13781367512759887,0.15576681925589095,0.0,0.16944089271928428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584554305240076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243512848790206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30045687648480585,0.0,0.15051914661919982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585386280342623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101432194213636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16967535712348486,0.0,0.1532697464814962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854718890352615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14743496411368803,0.0,0.10551317338564876,0.0,0.11904823936814947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551863441452424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024187559775153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21705082877462525,0.0,0.0,0.10589571349262666,0.0,0.0,0.09599679313690106
mentalhealth,calathea244,2020/02/21,"My mum told me to sign myself off the waiting list for therapy because there are ""people who need it more"" Just frustrated.

Been on a waiting list for CAT for 2 years now. Been given yet another ""assessment"", basically they have no slots available so they keep us on assessments in the meantime.

Vented my frustration to my mum about the waiting lists and she was like ""do you really *need* therapy? You should sign yourself off the waiting list so someone who actually needs it can have it.""

I'm pretty upset because I just feel super invalidated. I don't know how to explain that having surface level happiness, being functional, having friends and a relationship etc doesn't fix my mental health problems. But now I feel guilty, like I'm playing the victim and wasting mental health resources that could be put to better use.

Sorry for the rant, just feeling a bit hopeless.",5.450856313497823,7.703226886792457,5.952327044025158,74.17171262699567,69.44025157232704,8.414320270924044,32.35655539429124,9.057496981413335,3.201242477019836,701,32,111,14,13,226,105,159,0.157,0.705,0.138,-0.3774,0,0,0,0,0,1,22.0,1,2,2,2,11,13,3,1,9,0,16,2,0,2,0,27,34,7,0,6,4,2,3,2,1,1,2,0,0,0,7,3,0,5,5,1,0,1,3,6,0,0,5,3,15,7,14,25,3,12,0,1,0,0,14,7,0,0,6,78,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.14928738591247853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604139146737542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18651159247368984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529926053465502,0.16701562768073794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12214287843032735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706142510576663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23205536689889636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819273928301473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628511166470191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32522329353304724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597653974562207,0.0,0.0,0.0840743554986205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494775761465097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30833772819239424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34030041398195315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605776165253787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556366722509231,0.0,0.1463821541967068,0.0,0.15378815625302308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800354438397599,0.0,0.0,0.16424433991427564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962030284963216,0.0,0.0,0.17124970210781784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3498942064316531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14617989909190576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840173040952283,0.13212646388738408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851474679456752
mentalhealth,monieo,2020/02/21,"I just want to stop feeling like a failure. I'm not suicidal but I just want to stop feeling numb with hot tears sliding endlessly down my fucking face. I've been in such a rut for a month with no job... just pure laziness. My partner is sick of me for not doing what he wants because I'm depressed as shit. 

I get such intense waves of emotion where I cry out and feel like my chest is going to burst and then just empty numbness. I just want to sleep all the time. I just want to stop feeling like this. I want to be happy again. There is no light at the end of my tunnel.",1.3529752066115677,3.0850948760330645,2.6454545454545446,95.68818181818185,79.57851239669421,5.0611570247933875,23.396694214876035,5.565023196281405,0.16238181818181818,444,15,101,2,11,143,75,121,0.284,0.527,0.18899999999999997,-0.9659,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,11,9,2,0,5,0,6,8,4,0,2,29,21,5,1,6,9,0,5,3,1,0,3,0,0,1,2,5,0,3,4,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,1,6,12,4,18,19,1,15,0,1,0,1,2,5,2,0,11,63,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09427076375603026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16987136492940275,0.0,0.0,0.13319636970271048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17395593065648993,0.13697045104412353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127746485689099,0.331437391209213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14296773131907295,0.0807961501033327,0.0,0.08788888331410309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164623538314408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15346228870710374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22665666644371335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343695855469612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15874189251519946,0.0,0.0,0.15475767943411975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38787293159881575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16915761950336994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901753238658749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5472852908888844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jusiah858855,2020/02/21,Blacked out attack I don't know if this is the right subreddit to post here but i wanted to know if someone could help me understand if this was just some weird coincidence or something more but to put it simply i attacked one of my friends out of the blue but i have no memory or understanding of why i did it.We were with one of our teachers talking and what my girlfriend said i did was out of the blue i tackled him to the ground the thing is all i know from my perspective was that one moment i was standing the next i was on the ground over him.I had no reason to nor have i ever done anything like that before thankfully i regained awareness so i didn't beat him down or anything like that.im asking here because i have some mental health issues of my own so maybe there is a link,2.6142328042328025,4.435767037037039,3.563597883597886,90.12333333333336,76.16049382716051,6.3569664902998255,25.151675485008816,7.1686216300943375,0.9927675485008818,628,22,132,7,14,201,94,162,0.083,0.8079999999999999,0.109,0.7351,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,1,0,0,1,7,7,2,0,8,0,19,1,0,1,2,28,28,13,0,5,10,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,3,0,3,12,4,22,4,19,15,5,15,0,0,3,0,9,9,0,8,5,103,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566792533481972,0.0,0.1457990877904609,0.3548480450991941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950701649066972,0.0,0.13270823464630802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451926918363478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15959853624647055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107236944580145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049227681111095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16577539088916182,0.0,0.0,0.10453493733940368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16846072148511387,0.16277897476727451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25713027492826723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238578605891975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15668013976366768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15716834689694914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586243176707854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170422493564994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14936404938768105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567802320677121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16035015051505694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331867414212662,0.14835117227816774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13214217308137458,0.1200636024331721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253526260485102,0.0,0.14358459230742654,0.0,0.0,0.10361114640819337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247142435749245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198769725056588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072726836181731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThisIsMyUsername4012,2020/02/21,"I cried for the first time in awhile. This doesn't sound that big, but I've had a hard time crying for a couple years, and haven't cried unless I'm having a panic attack, but today happened and I kinda feel better.",7.5086666666666675,4.9663128666666685,7.607222222222222,80.5975,64.77777777777777,9.0,24.722222222222207,3.1291,0.6318888888888887,169,1,35,0,2,55,34,45,0.376,0.5579999999999999,0.066,-0.9443,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,0,3,1,1,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,7,7,5,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,3,2,1,4,6,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,5,21,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496035904254062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19404490433293411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24276622276897755,0.7230145872766047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093719530050372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18662483030376253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19401812863138632,0.0,0.1965427833337283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574231828123236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558723364765471,0.0,0.20796922631137305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412889068395072
mentalhealth,bruhhskeet,2020/02/21,"Do I have asd? I'm trying to come to terms with myself. So basically I started going out with this guy a year ago, who has mental health issues and self harms, and I started cutting last year. It's got progressively worse and my mum has just found out, everyone thinks me and my bf are very bad for eachother, and my mum says I've been controlling and manipulating him. I don't know how to stop being controlling, or what to do. My dad has asd, so with my lack of social skills, ticks, and inwardness my mum thinks I may also have asd. I've spent most of my life very naive and not noticed, or cared, I'm not normal. I also take on the persona of whoever I'm around, which apparently is a common trait of asd, I can't stop it and I hate it, I want to stop but I don't know how to. Does anyone have any advice?",3.024921568627452,3.7969561000000014,4.650294117647062,86.95465686274514,73.29411764705883,7.784313725490197,22.990196078431374,8.07648339933343,0.9310784313725496,627,15,142,9,12,212,98,170,0.139,0.853,0.006999999999999999,-0.9331,1,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,4,8,5,2,0,3,0,16,2,0,5,0,40,34,18,0,3,6,4,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,2,7,16,0,5,5,0,1,2,5,4,0,0,4,1,20,1,18,28,3,17,0,0,0,0,11,4,0,4,11,87,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298553155443486,0.1297068641429994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340295378691659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099504928639566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231272243656782,0.0,0.0,0.1302588470484828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12217392583523412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14918645673868805,0.0,0.0,0.1260446514694116,0.0,0.0,0.3282282671519281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804859210447447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981827784132048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043605395661836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315895940532238,0.0,0.11702818869661225,0.0,0.0,0.14488316947086324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14446406261584382,0.0,0.1555349302405928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15272361204680174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16083102628283275,0.119273099321037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335254367460672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474595700817284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14336586315451402,0.0,0.16659015904471164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163622394975901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526472166081458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14915827785529778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20713690919559904,0.0,0.0,0.366998739282804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001698551853717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187516250988808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934398267776756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414642560168138,0.08630533155808068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491160438537803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18845494249698624
mentalhealth,s_qw23,2020/02/21,"Vitamin D insufficency I just wanted to share something for a minute.

I have been diagnosed with treatment-resistant depression for 10 years. I always told my therapists I am too exhausted to activate myself, I barley got out of bed in the morning and was really happy if I managed to organize food.

I have been in several wards over the years and they did bloodwork and checkups everytime I arrived. But it wasn't until my family doctor ran an extensive workup 6 months ago (he thought such extensive exhaustion could well have a physical reason) that he found I had a vitamin D insufficency. He said it wasn't severe but definitly there. So he prescribed some solution with vitamin D.

Within days my sleep went from 11 - 12h to 8h per day. I could get up in the morning without major problems and I had enough energy to start some minor movement (like going for a walk, do some stretching and pay my bills etc).

Point is my therapists told me for 10 years I just needed to motivate myself (""I can't do the work for you..."") and it turns out a big contributor was something fixed withing 2 minutes of finding it.

Don't get me wrong, I am not wonderously healed. But I feel much better and am in a position to treat myself. I can do stuff. The overwhelming feeling of helplessness is gone. 

So unsolicited advice. If you get diagnosed with depression it might be a good idea to have an extensive physical workup independently of the psychhospital too. Maybe there is some physical component. And the workups the psychiatric hospitals do, seem to be very limited! (If you have a hammer and all that)

Just wanted to share.",6.785226068527019,7.7460739161073855,7.632882373719532,68.27391557753447,64.8724832214765,11.777039915224302,35.482868244436595,11.520995432342351,4.585386577181208,1289,59,218,41,19,432,165,298,0.064,0.7909999999999999,0.146,0.9687,0,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,3,1,4,11,16,0,1,18,0,32,12,1,3,1,50,54,18,0,9,11,0,2,1,0,1,10,1,1,0,8,15,1,1,10,0,2,6,6,8,1,0,18,3,30,8,35,31,9,27,0,4,0,0,13,12,0,10,10,158,38,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566332998102535,0.10492199920566338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848781825170544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468279537510088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18900706328653968,0.0,0.0,0.1526691827928204,0.0,0.2038924202018336,0.24027268858487466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114994008108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230101728017714,0.13200646227457455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158246535026277,0.0,0.11969616780252848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081819895989104,0.0,0.14312547502843787,0.12977934234257416,0.0,0.0,0.18551995025458898,0.0,0.06726863940716084,0.09927759166417237,0.0946660117226255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600002434011864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361785447666666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05782637116816757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891192939938755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255648467236173,0.0,0.0,0.09447652469149187,0.0,0.087010707074755,0.08776495023491633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11189165729594336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325777416510988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582661532843045,0.12169727322166432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259068412159115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775358032841496,0.0,0.2674338686087497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844886566754564,0.0,0.0,0.18224383304105485,0.0,0.0,0.08377821314885747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549775768638858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748580257920045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396730640845127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262025735265765,0.0,0.0,0.12874537402887484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766218867977937,0.13962758237988274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064228980278246,0.10972404377004492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409807937750625,0.1283600420388793,0.08616995401490793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941178055278973,0.0,0.22866641782164304
mentalhealth,Gyropi,2020/02/21,"I need alittle help 
So i’m having a really rough time figuring out if i was sexually abused, raped, or sexually assaulted, or any of those at all. Here’s my story: 

I was around 9 or 10 when I was with a boy in a bush. This bush was empty on the inside for context. We were hanging out and I was just talking to him, when he mentioned wanting to do acts of intercourse with me. I then reluctantly gave him a yes, and he started putting his penis inside of me. I then gave him oral, and he forced my head down a couple of times. I stopped and he asked me to keep doing it. I said no and he kept asking so I put my clothes back on. I sat down again to talk to him, and he asked me a couple more times before i firmly said no. he backed off and put his clothes back on. He would make me watch moaning noises and made me “do it” a couple more times before I finally stopped going with him to the bush. He was 10 or 11. Was I the perpetrator for doing it? Should I tell someone? Am I a sexual predator? Was I the victim, or was there no victims? I don’t know anymore, but i’m just so confused on what it is. Thank you for any help",0.4475000000000016,2.309934083333335,2.8141666666666687,92.6975,83.16666666666666,5.666666666666668,20.833333333333336,6.816661863887847,0.29695833333333344,860,26,199,10,24,295,121,240,0.134,0.816,0.05,-0.9071,0,0,0,0,1,0,27.0,1,1,0,0,14,6,4,1,12,1,20,2,1,2,1,38,40,22,0,5,9,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,7,15,0,4,2,0,0,6,4,5,0,0,17,4,36,1,28,21,3,34,0,0,1,1,32,12,0,7,16,139,43,0,0.0,0.14462548881404308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16601496252601725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210543610388261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866254519797426,0.34233916187315483,0.0,0.0,0.28157828280132835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20773438531511146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4051833871170525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371478393334768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937159655369911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527254067104154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16363340986360447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849579828013414,0.0,0.0,0.06708300072773621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154995958207158,0.08147844748778882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050866455616133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3681231073371012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819711254686768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322210047184795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342415138149867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639729380246204,0.0,0.0,0.20410138734543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19622030832693876,0.10668902765302746,0.11237982745833304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28470523007857224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199631505847362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671052890812034,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lord-Muffintop,2020/02/21,"can someone help me? I'm really struggling here and I think I'm going to ask my mom to take me to a mental hospital, I just don't feel safe with myself anymore but i'd like to already have a good hospital in mind so here's the sitch

my mom is a federal agent so our insurance is most likely the best out there but we till can't afford huge hospital bills i'm a minor from saint paul, mn, usa so if anyone can help me find one that'd be great",-0.25014842300556595,1.757645673469387,2.4539332096474986,93.33717068645643,87.16326530612245,6.012615955473097,18.092764378478662,7.348242739294969,0.28766122448979603,348,9,81,6,11,121,69,98,0.059000000000000004,0.711,0.231,0.9689,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,2,0,0,1,7,7,0,1,6,0,9,0,0,0,0,14,17,8,0,1,4,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,0,1,10,6,9,15,2,5,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,2,3,48,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356556887737768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117823782406959,0.14931782857751136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19963868916480626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241056038319812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797635877024307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19517913623904512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136433230839455,0.17911405272491826,0.0,0.2354375843084226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862736410581178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086576743187398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21520630360733534,0.0,0.21562275122491092,0.5002100141237796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470575006239111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680441022211018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809386506949089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232468879532473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16056162902376345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683302894223962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kowalski_The_Analyst,2020/02/21,"Just needed to make a post on how I felt, no need to be read Hey,
I've been contemplating making a post for several days...  I am 16 and have never talked about problems- especially emotionally- that I have with people.  I'm not very good at describing how I feel either so sorry for the long post.

The last few years have been pretty rough in my family after my nan died, the past few years have been sorting out the house and my grandads care etc.  During this time there was a period where I felt so down all the time and I'd rather have just been dead.  It sounds like what people have described depression as but, not in a bad way, I have a house, I have dinners to eat, I dont have anything to be depressed about.

I got out of that with the help of my dog (sounds stupid ik) and I've been a pretty optimistic person that enjoys life.

However, a few days ago my girlfriend broke up with me, I found it to be the most fulfilling (I don't know what other word to use) relationship I've ever had.  Some of my friends were friends with her too so I'm not involved with things they do anymore and my other friends don't talk much so I end up talking at them for hours and whenever I've tried to discuss problems with them they've not helped.
The other week I saw a dead guy in the road.  On my run I was at the scene of a death about a minute or two after it happened.  I'm still struggling to get it out of my head.  My school brags about how good their mental health department is but I've never felt welcomed there and everyone knew that I'd seen this and only one person talked to me for a minute to say ""are you okey,, he wasn't even on the mental health team.  My normal state of conversation is very light and humourous, I tend to cover up how I feel with appearing happy to others.  It annoys me that people don't see how I feel but equally I don't want them to know.

I feel like shit since losing the only person that liked the same music, shows, activities, and had the same personality as me.  I'm on school holidays and it's super quiet not having anyone to talk to.  It doesn't help that we were totally fine as normal on Sunday and Monday started with a call from her saying she has her own ways to go and wants to break up.
I don't know how to put my feelings on it into words.
I guess this is normal stuff after a breakup but I'm just struggling to cope with everything, doesn't help that I'm in my exam year.

I'm not suicidal, I'm not going to be dead in 24hours but at the minute it doesn't seem a bad idea.  I don't know what I'm trying to get at in this post, nor what I'm trying to get out of it.

I'm enjoying stuff I do, but underneath that feel really shit.  I don't want any of that to sound edgy 16 year old, it's not.  I just want to stop feeling lonely and confused and tbh, pretty depressed.  I don't know how to explain what I'm thinking, I don't even need replies to any of this, I just want to know that someone in the world knows and would care for how I felt, I guess.  Thanks, I hope ya can have a good day.",3.5718913690476204,3.9578558468750025,4.678794642857143,88.65864583333334,71.78125,7.782738095238094,23.98809523809524,7.7094869923839395,0.8751688988095241,2362,56,538,27,42,777,263,640,0.135,0.7120000000000001,0.154,0.9555,1,2,0,0,0,1,61.0,1,2,5,3,30,37,4,3,31,1,50,8,3,11,5,120,115,39,6,16,22,0,12,3,4,1,3,6,0,5,39,31,2,1,24,4,0,6,26,17,0,2,21,22,60,20,90,89,14,75,0,6,3,0,42,32,2,10,32,347,99,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05297388803506287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127808784087062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05926614589629073,0.041785781644847,0.0,0.04917762368087416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09979468566697404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061021933866162476,0.0,0.12185918930103985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156213223666092,0.0,0.15441434094958018,0.0,0.062021742199509323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003861041861091,0.0,0.0,0.06114969200993215,0.0,0.06722227852141965,0.05292987582857692,0.0,0.06664851609175787,0.07894221091651868,0.054056600257939014,0.0,0.05710351448675573,0.05370869191983139,0.0,0.05633667935124559,0.0,0.21151617428094568,0.04269276044071688,0.2295169858737523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06552406933310254,0.13851194675473727,0.0,0.09366684915899468,0.0,0.06792629570927218,0.1503722784075016,0.047795760123579764,0.0,0.13166538548663764,0.059172078890543336,0.05284582377327058,0.06361593595567286,0.0,0.0,0.06133129453987789,0.12704477954262794,0.0,0.0,0.16022424073385474,0.0,0.0,0.05935544834580125,0.05885184416748865,0.1379106935356047,0.0,0.06746208913402214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298988332118895,0.048712609396382237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04221045750301612,0.08758757176553543,0.0,0.0,0.05288597278848619,0.0,0.0668564742293059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978091024189972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204486255499315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04393068650355004,0.13293448511310016,0.09218163372815312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756571766569982,0.0,0.0,0.0627083676616703,0.0,0.04049511657425455,0.0909007811960048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05704795524703346,0.1242907739008132,0.2087215075821141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289353398507686,0.18239308599392406,0.0,0.11436504628476657,0.0,0.060075593587355425,0.0,0.0,0.059776458236436625,0.0,0.03828396962406756,0.0,0.0,0.06416018277427993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09504755646329767,0.0,0.12096120027746304,0.04762121095430544,0.05440352016649812,0.0,0.06751211337812046,0.1226861501232282,0.04943432633528669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05063469661378007,0.0,0.0,0.06689674781495218,0.042298638195274255,0.0,0.04772464179816496,0.049962275197049336,0.0,0.1249488530843929,0.13682246047582725,0.0653680536752176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401652720588403,0.0,0.055019242535255385,0.0,0.0,0.03970207876749598,0.0382919784171345,0.0,0.0,0.06969340698870746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171993479529328,0.0,0.05837711616120157,0.0,0.0,0.05161369991050169,0.0,0.0986169895264932,0.17624082584196454,0.09486986723254914,0.047936096948273034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042451992748654035,0.0,0.0,0.15393466011919427
mentalhealth,anonomoose12,2020/02/21,"Trigger warning!!! I was raped 2 years ago, and I still don’t feel alive, despite everything I’ve done I’ve never written on reddit before or even spoken up this much but and 4:31 am feeling half dead from insomnia, ranting will help me I think, I’m not going to edit this at all to keep it authentic. I really hope that I can connect to someone, know that you are not alone. Despite how alone you may feel. You may have your family and friends calling you crazy or mocking you, but that doesn’t make them true. There are people who will stand by you, even if they are on the internet. Please keep fighting, as I will for you.

I don’t really know what to say. Being raped has ruined my life. I was raped by my best friend of three years when I was in high school in grade 12, on numerous occasions. Having been my best friend before all of this I felt so guilty for being upset with him and hurt. I felt empathy for him because he was my best friend. I wanted to be his friend even after everything despite feeling in so much pain. I was a virgin, and at the time I wanted to stay that way until marriage, he knew that. And I felt conflicted between treating this person as a friend or an enemy. Even now I still do sometimes, when I reminisce on the good times we had before it all. However he wasn’t conflicted at all. He had no care that I was in so much pain, all he wanted to do was to protect himself and his relationships with everyone including his girlfriend (which he claimed was an open relationship, which I found out was a lie). And so my last year of high school was hell. He told everyone things about me, I don’t even know exactly what. Ive only heard of people thinking of me and calling me names like psycho. Like I made everything up. That got to me. I lost almost all of my friends to whatever lies he spread, I felt helpless and alone. And I even started to believe that maybe I was a psychotic individual and that everything that happened was something I hallucinated or something. Even now two years later I still feel that pain and questioning.

The sad thing is, it’s two years later. I’m in the most loving relationship I could have, with someone who is supportive of me and understanding. I have a job, and I’m out of the house a lot working towards something; I have a purpose. I live with my boyfriend and his family and we are working towards a life together, moving out. I’m out of my mum and step dads house, which is extremely good for me because my step dad mocked me when I cried out for help after cutting myself and mocked me for being raped. And I’ve been clean from drugs and alcohol for a year (I started after the rape). 

Even with all these, I still have nightmares almost every night of the incidents. I have crippling anxiety and depression. I have terrible insomnia, and I genuinely feel lost as to what else I can do to help get over everything that happened. I just feel so angry, that someone I trusted would do this to me and then ruin my relationships with all my friends. I even sometimes have nightmares of seeing those friends, and it breaks me down so much. I often have temptations of going back to the drugs to feel numb and not worry so much about everything and forget it all. I know it’s a bad idea but nothing else has ever helped so much and I don’t know what would help more or even equally.


Side note; I’ve gone to therapy all my life, and have been on medications for depression and anxiety, but nothing has helped substantially enough.",4.509810516907493,5.739477220437959,5.210653955012663,82.60396246089678,70.22627737226277,8.5699389244749,28.8701027856398,8.957266950251167,2.2517600178757617,2756,102,541,51,49,891,269,685,0.188,0.65,0.161,-0.9808,2,3,6,0,2,1,76.0,2,8,2,7,35,50,11,1,21,0,65,20,0,4,14,120,117,57,1,8,14,3,12,2,10,7,13,2,1,1,37,44,1,5,24,0,0,6,11,27,0,4,33,15,88,23,81,72,24,70,1,9,1,7,63,28,1,15,34,398,125,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043265080540752336,0.05216058718174605,0.09774772118134924,0.15165017052632487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467551274280661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03753010804166753,0.04075239021593907,0.05950544095231215,0.0,0.12459527174032242,0.05498956335171157,0.1536620076565336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967623602498328,0.0,0.049762702298258986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038968976371839006,0.0,0.05361296584726485,0.0,0.0,0.08407599977569906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04994722205441758,0.0,0.0,0.11320287153637718,0.0,0.08154513979473547,0.0,0.0,0.050431400496581416,0.0,0.3223702507080086,0.0441493583097201,0.04112259171845503,0.0932756965769342,0.2631912779494591,0.0,0.09202311025072893,0.0,0.19742911418394984,0.0,0.18745218158663374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053515123057951273,0.3393783666530338,0.0,0.02550000842037556,0.0,0.055477080571307805,0.08187516501325866,0.03903597579782031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632097460090625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19628863210897854,0.1031360280766648,0.0,0.04847705819731056,0.0,0.11263506388845088,0.0522496515647292,0.055097951615312606,0.0,0.0,0.04843411040298856,0.08676505143104432,0.0,0.0,0.1341171755163849,0.03978478920576338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342296429070268,0.04768995301102052,0.0,0.04309809267976972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10655873873081216,0.041494560564405966,0.044050854197409416,0.046183025197779344,0.03257951828026727,0.0,0.04903389414679644,0.0,0.0,0.049168622213634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05187486017583735,0.21527564922498466,0.0,0.03764350659882562,0.0,0.0,0.04580271946815096,0.0,0.09366460765718176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037120454676267615,0.15580449975930571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767422646332022,0.0426170004274102,0.0,0.0535761971535913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05467579338192498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253492392737614,0.0,0.0,0.20960481310348794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038813841480395316,0.0,0.0987919948191566,0.038893417187397465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406381568793348,0.11272365434709132,0.0965441252332596,0.0,0.06909268155176339,0.05202251338200325,0.15591156683152926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055386398767421074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05581585778190142,0.0,0.06485133333517336,0.06254800588491892,0.0,0.0,0.05692032392506419,0.0,0.0,0.046637848288467086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535606035862472,0.05081053626651811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636413683180302,0.03874127989236848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106517277354132,0.04956658782052493,0.0,0.06934317844181141,0.0,0.0,0.18858334875275048
mentalhealth,miaaa54321,2020/02/21,"A poem I wrote about my friend who killed himself. The day after, I awake from my eternal slumber.

From the bitter dark, I rise.

.

The day after, I put on my shoes and brush my teeth.

A spoonful of honey and a bowl of yogurt.

A glass of milk and homemade toast.

Homework shoved into my bag haphazardly, 

Pills in my front pocket.

.

The day after, the sun rises. 

Plants reach towards its warmth as it touches every surface and crevice. 

The world glows.

Flowers open.

Flowers given.

.

The day after, I walk.

Green leaves falling 

White picket fences

A dog looking for his best friend, 

A dog waiting, for eternity

.

The day after, I feel loved.

The girl I hardly know writes.

The boy I nod at in the corridors remembers.

My mother tidys my room and makes my bed, 

ready for the next day and for forever.

.

The day after, I love.

I fall in love with my friends.

The way they smile, hands hovering over my belongings,

As they hug their knees and struggle to breath,

I tell them it’ll be alright, I’m here for them.

.

But I’m not.

.

The day after, I weep.

A spoonful of honey and a bowl of yogurt.

The warm sun rising, saying hello to the flowers.

Green leaves falling.

Love.

.

For death welcomed me with arms wide, 

it beckoned me, 

Grasped me with its long, bony fingers.

It whispered to me;

Everything I want would be over if I were to simply enter its embrace.

But death didn’t tell me it continues, the world moves on.

.

The day after I go home.

I find myself the day before 

I tell him not to do it

I tell him they weep the day after

I tell him there is no day after

For he knows, but he fails to see the warmth of the day after.

.

A spoonful of honey and a bowl of yogurt.

The warm sun rising, saying hello to the flowers

Green leaves falling 

Love.

The day after, I sleep and sleep, for death is cold and eternal

.

Sorry for the weird formatting it won't work for me atm.",1.0543368107302555,3.5190525683060088,2.291249379036266,93.45106184798807,86.15846994535521,4.420168902136116,19.520367610531547,5.852544927426893,-0.08463715846994546,1424,41,289,10,44,454,172,366,0.092,0.7829999999999999,0.126,0.8674,4,0,0,0,0,0,71.0,0,0,6,3,3,21,2,1,37,1,10,17,9,1,0,36,28,17,4,3,6,1,7,0,6,3,1,3,4,2,11,16,1,3,6,0,1,14,5,7,0,0,4,23,49,14,55,19,1,63,0,3,7,6,40,16,0,1,32,182,60,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06655561174342539,0.0,0.08208231964547137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7061951864382723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589991442053604,0.0,0.07029502911622619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03954809626883767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07148753076657358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18128725504249804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04445165916317543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700657060526236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784565026862615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653383886983375,0.0,0.08597036343784054,0.0,0.0,0.24845669635034676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921823757234141,0.06568130324547318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3529626174385799,0.0,0.05220943955165102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313067594498852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318304919759685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786281596040587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860289045291081,0.0,0.0,0.12440017639950443,0.0,0.0,0.06232761013021074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565439304651076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755582508790445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176780099873675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418188804413562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04613351597734292,0.06208380655889832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569418002167803,0.0,0.0,0.05556203213369616,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trrblv333,2020/02/21,"Anyone know why I feel like detached? A lot of the times I feel like I just distant from everything. Like i feel like I'm watching reality from a window just far away from everything. And my mind and body feel detached like they aren't really connected. When i think about myself a lot of the times i think using we instead of i. Like ""we need to go to the store"" when i need to go to the mall m",4.4048192771084365,4.306877433734943,5.5273734939759045,85.00045783132533,69.8433734939759,9.049638554216868,27.443373493975905,8.841846274778883,1.7541344578313254,309,9,69,5,5,103,45,83,0.037000000000000005,0.775,0.188,0.9001,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,2,0,1,0,6,6,0,0,7,0,1,1,1,1,0,19,14,4,0,2,2,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,7,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,5,13,6,12,14,2,8,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,2,10,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11687937669169128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704858448824574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856726570806561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30045810739501144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33807642746300065,0.35824888513296743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18999723807857244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186457782059733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4899839318983758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842201435739801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16877993072764813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24788814359403216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708442754466134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21421365802012213,0.0,0.0,0.1949400405524068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144369133155497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083230980300694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,somethinlost678,2020/02/21,"Advice I know I am struggling mentally really badly, I recently had a really public meltdown and it's not helping anybody. But it's not like I can get any help, because I am under-18 and in accordance with the law, they have to inform my parents if I get help. But my parents have issues as well? As in I know that my parents are already suffering mentally and I can't bear hurter them more. Advice?",2.3475,4.722419746835445,4.691629746835441,79.01440664556964,79.37974683544303,8.000632911392406,28.8623417721519,8.841846274778883,2.880277215189873,316,15,56,8,8,110,52,79,0.16699999999999998,0.7090000000000001,0.125,-0.5344,3,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,0,1,5,0,1,2,0,8,0,0,0,0,13,12,8,0,1,5,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,1,0,13,2,6,11,1,3,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,1,2,42,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355837204616008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894849398177336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167678778199288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14336968268561825,0.10467209582303266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17942153068017744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3452783843001616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17921938456230566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887333409852842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388825041000729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3460841849362608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5719869338960469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22000211896112448,0.0,0.16954173313482362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17950732846057493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15438684010023662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seulkilla,2020/02/21,"I’m 17 with extremely close minded Hispanic Christian parents and I’m forbidden to seek help regarding my mental health So I’m basically just gonna give you a shorter version of what has been going on lately back in 8 grade I used to get bullied a lot to the point were 27 out 31 people from my class were planning to jump me I somehow go through a movie cliche and get hot during summer mostly because I hated my scars, my parents fat shamed me a lot and I was too depressed to eat.
During 8 grade I was hospitalized twice with 6 suicide attempts, I was diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression, PTSD, OCD, ADHD. I used to take a lot of medication like around 8 pills a day 
So high school comes in it’s my freshman year I start getting attention that I’m not used to, everything was going well until I was r*ped during homecoming, I pretended I was fine for weeks until one day in class during an argument with a student a girl called me a whore and something just kinda clicked in me I had a mental breakdown and was later hospitalized once I got out My schedule was changed but I was too embarrassed to go back to school and I started talking to a “17 year old boy” online who when I had later met he turned out to be 26 years old and now I was too emotionally unstable to care so I went to his house, he drugged me and we had sex and this went on and on for weeks now you might be thinking if my parents were strict how did I meet up with this man? 
I would ditch school everyday and since I put my phone number as my moms only I would get the calls from the school 
The 26 year old became my boyfriend at 13 and would some times force me to have sex with him 
I would tell him to stop but I was too drugged to stop him.
 
After the 1st semester I decided I wanted to be better. got homeschooled but had to take care of my 1 year old sister with my other sister who was 16 at the time yet my relationship with this man continued since every time I would try to break up he would threaten to kill himself fast forward a bit I know go to a charter school were I still get called a whore even though I don’t talk at all I just finally broke up with the man and you know never really got the chance to cope with everything that occurred to me and it kinda just hit me 
I have never asked for help but the one time I do ask for help to my parents they said no I tried to explain them my situation but all my mom did was tell me that it was my fault because of the way I dress and that she feels disgusted of me for being bi 

My question to you is 
Do you think I should start medication again? If so does planned Parenthood provide that kind of service because I would have to do this behind my parents backs and just how do I even get help without getting hospitalized 

(I didn’t put everything that occurred to me since some of the stuff that affected me are not my story to tell) 

My ig is @/lovekillaaa if you would like to reach to me with advice or if you’re curious by what I mean “glew up”",5.445389610389611,5.082983279220785,6.1006233766233775,82.67164935064936,67.66883116883116,9.312727272727274,30.74935064935065,8.841846274778883,2.2077849350649354,2364,81,502,35,35,774,274,616,0.113,0.82,0.067,-0.9818,6,0,3,0,1,1,19.0,1,6,2,4,30,19,3,2,26,0,52,14,1,6,4,96,101,38,2,14,18,9,2,2,0,11,8,1,0,5,20,35,2,2,10,1,0,12,8,11,1,3,33,4,89,8,82,52,10,80,1,3,1,5,56,22,0,16,48,341,109,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731001450720711,0.05472978599741784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042845509989061316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04985846292091315,0.1047187227057355,0.0,0.0,0.1291987073080831,0.0,0.10242477906406004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04953399655215394,0.061145578275902675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17156946137039458,0.0,0.11420656009399137,0.0,0.05924840604779225,0.0482454184423113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224028310461457,0.0,0.09647818825528008,0.05684633508922701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049012455784594885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299016125917258,0.05730955552321065,0.0,0.06300078997444987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398472291422832,0.0,0.04718865259934566,0.0,0.15100752729017747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028319025786384008,0.0,0.0,0.06135337235633805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20483089509716576,0.05372740439876205,0.15915148905428148,0.0,0.13438270963644994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055295715205091855,0.0,0.05953325035512614,0.0,0.0,0.15016232655774758,0.059174896279724824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462502335367032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06196389322235365,0.058323091563679874,0.06156040792738174,0.0,0.06317879008453545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054724776116341384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428464735376236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061008480989937226,0.0,0.11284313247145768,0.11288457826618364,0.05941500379687776,0.056551511104967124,0.13119038695054275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863927238669623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23508139191887906,0.0596460563014509,0.07590413149927831,0.042596153764842486,0.0,0.0,0.3109479649607723,0.0,0.0,0.03882848124421474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05294509901891992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546965694073646,0.11260581870879005,0.06274110924617067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03587977650750958,0.0,0.0,0.060130990626816386,0.0,0.0,0.053275865810611216,0.0,0.0,0.2834124095968265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06327242350630738,0.0,0.13898970755590095,0.06295466758000645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043117235096561485,0.0,0.0,0.11892698431651308,0.0,0.04472758437627182,0.09364939349183182,0.0,0.0,0.0641150767708537,0.061263008502734966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422119368375776,0.09003325800278793,0.1468588165208718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177456471355295,0.05502698907347578,0.0,0.1306334683344705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605070041671314,0.060919971523505076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451172411611879,0.0,0.0,0.0330346173858277,0.04445606956417957,0.08985152072971529,0.0,0.05035738150754759,0.10383884737351101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05398913785442398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182884172309177,0.0,0.0,0.1803346562566218
mentalhealth,throwaway33479900652,2020/02/21,"Self awareness to nothing I’ve been overly self aware of myself recently and now I just don’t know who I am anymore.

Someone tell me who I am, you know who I am",1.359333333333332,2.8306070285714284,3.457142857142859,91.0561904761905,78.71428571428572,5.80952380952381,25.952380952380953,6.42735559955562,0.8653809523809524,126,5,28,1,3,43,25,35,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,7,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,7,0,3,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,2,21,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148377516895681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3489384594568413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046140788426984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134561750714784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6623657864366517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689851651103171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774764437065757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StarkySlayer,2020/02/21,"Borderline personality disorder So I have had the flu really badly for like 5 days now so I have had just way too much time to think... I feel like there is just no way I can have a healthy relationship.  I can’t tell if I actually love someone or am just that desperate for someone to care about me.  My mood swings have also gotten so bad at this point, Like 20 minutes ago I was just chatting with a friend and just felt the urge to block them and did... I have been getting angry for no reason and it is only getting worse.  I am just so desperate to feel loved and feel it isn’t fair for others around me...",4.242819999999998,4.602005072000001,5.418949999999999,84.04122500000003,70.28,8.81,26.825,8.841846274778883,1.7079,474,14,104,8,8,158,78,125,0.21,0.607,0.184,-0.451,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,16,10,0,0,4,0,17,3,0,1,0,21,28,11,0,1,8,0,4,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,6,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,7,4,13,7,12,21,1,9,0,0,0,2,8,3,0,2,7,74,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.1701429349330832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15455301282894687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13942966861325468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552107314596161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29115418758653056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17776404136036647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244296880253304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19982312372750566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644736589754394,0.12455749420789973,0.1674057869734252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347043450890242,0.0,0.1821840190414228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555395423076205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147199611698629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128169183094011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326029684006632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15223791869715142,0.0,0.0,0.1648195123657025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169470597542676,0.17926345639495309,0.0,0.18718938554892295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954566940663145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15239181072532348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117180718853785,0.0,0.0,0.10166637209344813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27678587227291584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17768014045368452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PlsDontNerfThis,2020/02/21,"Is it normal to be ""half aware"" of a problem's reality and still feel like it's a problem? For example, I haven't gone and thrown up food on purpose (though I've been tempted), but it's mostly because I don't want to taste that.  

Realistically, I'm aware that I'm not fat. I'm roughly 155lbs at a height of 5'6-5'7. But despite knowing that, I still see myself and can only think of how fat I am. 

I say ""half-aware"" because I'm aware of reality in a sense, but I've still got this constant thing in my head confusing me and telling me I am fat",3.875091575091576,3.586429427350432,5.653357753357756,84.30076923076925,70.96581196581197,8.395115995115995,30.38949938949939,7.957251820313856,1.7812525030525037,421,16,98,5,7,146,69,117,0.057,0.925,0.018000000000000002,-0.4182,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,4,0,8,6,4,1,0,18,19,9,0,4,4,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,8,4,5,0,3,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,3,5,10,1,12,15,1,11,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,2,5,57,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25844740961221363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22907979589077726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071856672395878,0.15144167677891116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563323424892808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954326638326864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21755712182251247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165010662621413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356485577599543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207699674734662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122366629292534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4056808272754549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685784800039781,0.0,0.0,0.16892409773260308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5078729767982403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18528368357424585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14083299646334693,0.13583102518576218,0.20827356790154347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503387415985512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ayla57,2020/02/21,"Currently in a depressive state only to find out my brother is also very depressed and it made me more depressed This is basically just a vent. Dont habe anyone to confide to. :'(

Yesterday I had a trigger which threw me back to a depressive state. I tried to distract myself by watching fleabag but i was too depressed to sustain my interest. I ended up curling up into a ball and sleep half of the way away. 

Today I found out through my older sister that my younger brother--who is also manic-depressive-- is also having a depressive episode. We live in the same house together with our older sister who, thankfully is mentally normal. 

She asked me to keep an eye on my brother. She's not aware of my current mental state. This scenario has happened a number of times before. It's doubly hard when you're depressed but you have to keep it to yourself because you dont wanna add to the stress your older sister is going through having to support two mentally ill adult siblings on top of being a single mom. 

I want to scream in frustration but i cant because i know that my brother needs me right now but I'm also so emotionally and mentally weak at the moment and knowing that i cant afford to be depressed at the moment is triggering me.

more context: i have a long history of bipolar depression, hospitalizations, ECT procedures and been on different combos of medication. I'm in my thirties, cant support myself financially (i used to be able to when my depression wasnt this worse yet).

I'm just so exhausted being in this cycle and I dont want to feel selfish but not having enough strength to lift my brother up right now fuels my guilt even more.",5.093232157506151,6.540124566037741,6.1663248564397035,75.47888022969646,69.062893081761,8.675088870659009,33.00847689362865,9.085049710711278,3.1219418649165984,1324,61,226,25,23,441,165,318,0.213,0.7170000000000001,0.07,-0.9947,4,0,0,0,1,0,29.0,2,3,0,2,16,23,1,3,15,0,27,7,2,4,0,38,48,19,0,5,9,8,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,12,12,0,2,5,1,0,2,9,18,0,2,7,5,37,5,45,37,6,44,0,10,2,0,18,20,0,0,18,173,49,0,0.07570070463185906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24215130457674566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052931692807648735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07076993998682295,0.0,0.07112330391644565,0.05820916913626791,0.0,0.09229289383008768,0.0,0.06441572402136046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7172099657150021,0.0,0.0,0.07909112426662966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661619861173287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515310367455535,0.06704835514428448,0.07821906395860036,0.0,0.04999960145899385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038276550813542726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918907259962208,0.0,0.0,0.0830019153147652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043022454965708334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694188310053667,0.0,0.06781296221641914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734844937400649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13457252902814293,0.0,0.0,0.08320625504242386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684510909113278,0.06699274143694366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162983708912914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626049579854911,0.30515402109266104,0.0,0.0,0.08865975034309202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05613111328437801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417061775775684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05757379707692479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929597626796946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575537477540756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671490138981165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718085250445949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969503811459267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0441416896397776,0.0,0.07175541653994105,0.0,0.0,0.051395809320274106,0.0,0.07394858868272973,0.0,0.0,0.06538110335111444,0.0,0.062461009340424464,0.08930047385899363,0.06008769575900678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714548531199218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RichAssociate8,2020/02/21,"I’m scared all the time Whenever I hear a plane fly overhead I think it’s going to drop a bomb and kill everyone. Today at school, an alarm went off during lunch. It turned out to be an ac unit that caught fire, but I was certain that there was a shooter and we where all going to die. People where cheering and laughing and I thought they where screaming in terror. My heart sank; I thought someone was shooting at us. I don’t know what this all means, but I hate it. Does anyone know what these could be pointing to?",2.032,4.116783676190483,2.55261904761905,95.4632142857143,78.90476190476191,4.961904761904762,22.880952380952376,5.6839178017228535,0.1455523809523811,406,13,87,2,10,125,73,105,0.251,0.655,0.094,-0.9505,0,0,0,2,0,0,11.0,2,0,1,0,4,9,2,3,6,0,7,2,1,0,4,19,21,6,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,9,6,1,0,6,0,0,4,1,6,0,0,7,3,11,3,9,11,3,16,0,0,0,0,4,9,0,0,2,55,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14207693997583595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16223269960916725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21088176400699526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17781515046378446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19415916804190195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309579923690927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006105542315308,0.0,0.0,0.2290127465369881,0.2407841239064983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22480242665411987,0.0,0.22333859879063409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213362308240496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14086811452713136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19208261650354325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034311676603868,0.2056416861756316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721643695129455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019756732965487,0.0,0.3226243406688708,0.11848319705498657,0.0,0.1926027577794214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221015122162197,0.0,0.0,0.2444155926389031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18836150907082547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chazfester,2020/02/21,"My Bipolar brain Im not sure how this story goes or where to start it or how it even began or why i am even writing it. All i know it this exact moment is that i was just lying in bed and anxiety and depression had come over me, feelings of disconnection from myself and a profound disconnect to other people. Physically uncomfortable, my nose slightly stuffed and realize that its going to be one of those nights where thoughts race. Which is the beginning of an indefinite series of nights of insomnia. So i decided to get up, sit on the couch, open my notes app and start writing.

And so this story begins...... i guess for me its a story well too known but never understand where it will take me next, this time around. Its that ferocious vicious cycle of “fear”. The rain before the storm which preceded by a storm that just passed with a few sunny days in between. The thunder brewing in the background, flashes of light in the sky that warns you somethings coming. The warning bells ring and you have to hold on to something tight, ground yourself before your swept away. 

Life is complicated. And trauma, ptsd mental illness, and addiction complicates it even more. Knowing whats going on, being aware of whats happening is half the problem and half the solution. Your action or reaction to whats unfolding is where the story turns one way or another. The other half of the solution is depending on which way you turn.",5.663382323733862,7.1947922716981125,6.013247269116189,76.79238331678253,67.79245283018868,9.201588877855016,30.92850049652433,9.549672527348893,2.9933396226415097,1132,45,196,24,19,363,157,265,0.121,0.8390000000000001,0.04,-0.9622,0,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,5,0,0,16,7,1,1,18,0,13,7,2,3,4,46,33,20,0,1,9,0,2,0,0,1,5,2,2,0,27,15,0,2,8,0,0,6,2,5,1,5,4,6,17,2,33,26,3,41,1,1,0,0,7,19,0,8,13,149,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071300999809345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496727882421234,0.10576094424513843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12307189524580853,0.0,0.0,0.1298905151394429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352812964381994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15433282803839882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381804306338447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891598741108548,0.0,0.11907460421808125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739386515805765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556979265589782,0.0699034019675585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222996855974557,0.0,0.15714142989263447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229806606332347,0.0,0.1222541024042969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14933382640334408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195727328669936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765013061857286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932357896071074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662699608911363,0.0,0.14703054441405872,0.25947669762272696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18736368458492714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584520854206703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228666980343204,0.1616069627651844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21286335479335816,0.0,0.0,0.19570825757864133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029907838685065,0.0,0.10394686598106773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109755132720965,0.08061474215500218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007528076271125,0.0,0.14392322451556128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21947298075040134,0.0,0.0,0.12430343854725084,0.0,0.12474920728401055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kitkat1025,2020/02/21,"Struggling I am really struggling tonight.

To be honest with you...I am really struggling tonight. I am struggling to feel my worth. I am struggling to do anything. I cannot stop crying. I am just struggling.  I am struggling to keep my head up. I am struggling to not just run away from everything. I am really hurting tonight. I hate this. I feel worthless.",1.045248756218907,3.4724933134328366,2.0860074626865703,90.05149875621893,100.94029850746269,4.621393034825871,27.971393034825873,6.42735559955562,1.6771900497512433,280,15,50,4,12,88,31,67,0.409,0.47600000000000003,0.115,-0.9768,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,2,12,1,8,0,0,11,1,1,0,0,8,15,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,1,1,2,11,0,0,0,2,12,1,9,14,0,7,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,36,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903816705788978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318997211054172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206443507892012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870914731102808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106784959195112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843551303292752,0.11271843664614545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757650770425182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09762296429291856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21108192336430706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182375154064544,0.0,0.9185548412805256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_aM_a-thiCC,2020/02/21,"Trouble with motivation, energy and growing up. Well, here I am. I have fallen into a rut. Like always. I have no motivation, no drive. It's weird. Low energy, always moody. A week ago, I had a sudden burst of energy that lasted for this past week and today it died. It always happens that way. 1 month of horrible agonizing time being a lazy pos and then a promising week of me actually doing stuff, being productive and motivated; ready to start fresh all over again. Then it just dies. Why? WHY!!!?? It's so freaking annoying because I don't choose to sit here and do nothing all day. I don't choose to stay in my room ignoring friends and playing games/watching videos all day. The days I get up and do stuff I get so happy. I mean, I still ldo stuff every day but with the same ""this is the usual"" type of deal. 

For example,.when I'm in one of those good vibes for a week, I'll clean the whole house to perfection and keep it that way all week and then when my motivation dies back down, I do the bare minimum so they don't kick me out lol. It's seriously annoying because I love those high energy and happy times. It's been annoying how for years it's been the same cycle of no motivation, motivation, no- and continue. I've tried to figure out what causes the energy spikes but I honest to God don't have an answer. If anyone can help me and give me some suggestions I would absolutely love to hear them. I am beyond tired of being a failure. 

And the idea of me having wasted my childhood on doing nothing and my teenage years on getting high and wasted all the time is really soul crushing. Here I am wanting to go back when back then I couldn't wait to be here now. I just hate the fact that I can't go back. I hate the idea that I'll never experience things the same way ever again. I'll never have another late night insomnia riddled stroll though the trailer while everyone else sleeps. Acting as if I'm on some secret mission. No more experiencing things for the first time again. Like wind chimes. Our neighbors used to have some and I have a memory I go back to Everytime I hear similar chimes. It was a windy sunny cool spring day. Everything about that memory is great and I remember taking it in as a kid. Soaking up all the sun and all of the world around me. 

Now, everything feels so lifeless, less vivid and everyday it's just the same. I don't know. I just know that if I had the chance to go back and relive all of the good moments, I would in a heartbeat. 

The reason I used to love weed so much was because it put me back in that mindset of what the world was like as a kid. Vibrant and full of life. I don't get that anymore and now it's just being high. Oh well. Sorry for the wall of text.",1.5336329376295446,3.83238568123862,3.3190380629357463,88.12586065573774,81.9872495446266,6.700596696187425,20.75877771496765,7.873277556716777,0.9435725519753776,2125,62,443,40,58,708,243,549,0.124,0.6729999999999999,0.203,0.9945,0,0,0,0,0,0,68.0,1,0,2,8,38,31,5,0,35,2,41,7,1,11,13,88,71,44,3,7,10,0,1,3,2,2,3,2,3,2,34,28,0,3,19,2,0,9,15,12,2,2,7,6,44,19,56,56,20,97,2,1,1,3,17,27,0,6,59,306,78,7,0.0,0.0,0.06666520414955496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060556779252825266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17052968245306682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716338242832158,0.0,0.0,0.06774973571567773,0.04776716319743991,0.0,0.0,0.06081448579117652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677080240521599,0.0,0.12493185521856424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017792184852922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22028635727222756,0.07042936247600133,0.0,0.0,0.21269933681847408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706809010836414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179447517258953,0.05755800469741223,0.06527753671858402,0.12279353172621507,0.06682479641473263,0.0,0.0,0.034541919072752475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05810837174905086,0.0,0.0,0.05277969766257852,0.0,0.14276625505442925,0.06553359810927498,0.15529906704246108,0.11459810618696074,0.0,0.07531709789520218,0.0,0.0,0.060410383367622375,0.1454443437521408,0.0,0.1348930668796243,0.0,0.0,0.15399105921040782,0.0,0.045789842585508736,0.21653440628761533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882588700598987,0.0,0.15423775717271845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072116358850555,0.0,0.0,0.0750878453500913,0.05568552438690788,0.07706185483484089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04825262883251147,0.10012520215971013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18496980614781905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744146366122241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545280693622921,0.0,0.05021909819531699,0.0,0.10537687626677024,0.0,0.0,0.06410863304413181,0.0,0.13109942010522396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04629174723934624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521402451020905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06867505094102179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043764087995807145,0.07023879611471699,0.0,0.0,0.07738713516908173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683639452667801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764726120816473,0.048353432056769854,0.07281428393699085,0.0545561352109692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346116504714259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051364084315247145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077038174770936,0.0,0.06711875675847309,0.0,0.1593391921544072,0.07851759387427894,0.0647542617731726,0.0,0.0,0.04638113540761876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800377687335475,0.07523889069887127,0.0,0.040293726519689856,0.16267487117267346,0.2739892944253243,0.0,0.12284607598230067,0.0,0.12328661842220835,0.07627082159792271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970574767712434,0.0,0.0,0.08798473717869018
mentalhealth,claritywithjane,2020/02/21,"Psychology Harvard Grad Student Here: Talk To Me If You Need Help Hey redditors,

If you need someone to talk to, and feel that you cannot find quality mental health professionals, or that you cannot afford this help, please don't hesitate to message me for a free session(s). If I have time, I will happily help you uncover the root causes of your issues (sometimes not what you think it is on the surface) and pass on some tools you can use to heal the root issue.

*Msg me with--------------------------------------------*  
Subject: **Mental Health Session Request**  
Msg:  
**1. My (your) Time Zone:**  
**2. Three Available Time Slots (No longer than 90 min) (I will hopefully be able to match one of these three with my schedule)**  
**3. A paragraph about what you're struggling with**

I will get back to you within 24 hours, most likely even sooner.  


I've been a long time reader, first time poster. (Admins, please take down if not allowed- just thought I'd offer my help for free since I saw a few other volunteers post.)",1.6005562659846542,4.104816510869565,1.4629795396419425,94.21271099744246,101.28260869565216,4.121227621483377,19.54219948849105,6.068283710208149,0.2143579283887473,794,26,146,9,34,233,121,184,0.015,0.8220000000000001,0.163,0.9790000000000001,2,0,0,0,0,0,95.0,0,10,0,1,5,5,0,1,7,0,11,3,0,5,0,27,21,7,0,7,8,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,4,0,2,1,6,1,0,4,3,2,21,6,20,14,3,18,0,0,1,0,20,5,0,8,12,88,29,4,0.13661311267953474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504705102637003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033929853570268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902316724958814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.069075694535527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248619100338823,0.11620304385637133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137471287676682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904267009223864,0.0,0.0,0.3662755589930722,0.0,0.0,0.1356876457804871,0.1345363973733931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851771928729545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06674226626035677,0.0,0.0,0.12089830575743962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275347771667902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025937840668194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257258072679814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999203471486785,0.0,0.0,0.13083759859470398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300777852946466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575184704706272,0.0,0.13511386162830602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428176872594758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271605902336284,0.21960889031815015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753616640932585,0.0,0.10845555163478404,0.3983010230849351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798986657594546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,omgmims,2020/02/21,"I'm finally getting help. But I don't want help. I feel like i don't deserve. It.
Why am I even like this. There's no reason.. 
Ugh
Sorry",-3.843145161290323,-3.8999519677419343,0.005120967741936155,101.92768145161293,133.19354838709677,2.8403225806451613,13.55241935483871,5.148860815047168,-1.0903258064516128,103,3,26,1,8,37,23,31,0.228,0.456,0.316,0.5964,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,4,7,1,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,13,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22140422170795626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16949314985015887,0.2394753652880841,0.0,0.3672081240734385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17513432165219714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4493707853703439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275350906761476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3446535431367345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3752421477129838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977165950924366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30247649597497595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bromm18,2020/02/21,"What's the proper method for dealing with suppressed emotions For a long time in my youth people said I wore my emotions on my sleeve, I also had a very bad anger issue that I never got professional help for. Over time I learned to simply suppress and ignore any and all negative emotion, along with that I feel I started to suppress the positive emotions as well. To this day I feel little anger, sadness, joy or any other feeling. If I do get an angry outburst, it feels like I just collect it internally and go numb to it. In the past I would want to scream and hit something and now its just a deep sigh followed by numbness or a void. 
So I guess my question is whether or not others have ever dealt with such an experience and if so how did you overcome it.",5.736504782928628,5.87724091390729,6.113598233995585,81.11416482707877,67.01324503311257,8.03561442236939,33.334069168506254,7.3871296695380915,2.2062709345106697,602,25,116,5,9,194,102,151,0.201,0.705,0.094,-0.9623,1,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,10,12,2,0,9,0,6,2,0,1,3,36,20,17,0,4,9,0,4,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,11,10,0,4,6,0,0,2,3,8,2,0,5,6,16,3,18,13,1,18,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,7,11,86,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759955175996968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20000441162196506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278449161414412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483808475810357,0.15160688865774608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6616667601672447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301935141535493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14384766684601286,0.0,0.0,0.2974210013996413,0.10505587249026528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682998600724059,0.0,0.0835745473834899,0.0,0.1176130385874338,0.0,0.16199727783207224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856763319251163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348685027877162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718434747573449,0.14738739355239658,0.0,0.13013873913133062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341761295028804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14038030453863226,0.10194917951621499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647348648368096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398826488537211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320985524658245,0.0,0.0,0.10408603929289467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17149749986733048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133548838397774,0.08673664357188884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13221979234751607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044634052968578,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goteym-,2020/02/21,"I’ve been wondering if anyone else feels any of these. I wanted to know if anyone in high school or is a teenager is feeling like this.
I don’t want to die, but I don’t want to be alive.
Whenever I think about my future I just want to quit. When I see someone dying on the news or getting a terminal disease I can’t control the fact that I wish I was them.

Every part of my life doesn’t match up, my music taste,my hobbies/interests, academic life, social life, etc are all different and that leaves me in with a small roll in several different friend groups but never actually spending much time with people outside of school. I feel like I’m being split into pieces by each part of my life pulling in a different direction and I’m left in the middle with nothing.

I don’t think I’ll ever have a relationship either.
My social life isn’t horrible and I do have friends but nobody sees me in any way beside friend. I have missed 100% of the shots I’ve taken and just don’t want to continue to disappoint myself.

Sorry about grammar and spelling, it’s 1:30 am on a Thursday night and I can’t sleep",4.3299702380952345,5.0548262232142855,5.5107857142857135,82.15088095238097,70.25,8.651904761904763,28.32619047619048,8.841846274778883,2.099978333333333,870,30,175,15,15,290,128,224,0.069,0.7859999999999999,0.145,0.9253,3,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,1,2,6,7,0,0,10,0,20,6,1,1,4,40,40,14,2,8,10,0,3,2,3,0,5,0,0,0,5,11,0,1,7,0,1,1,9,2,0,0,3,5,23,5,27,35,8,24,0,2,2,0,8,14,0,5,10,111,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.10227216080225834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14253864166084426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656074508185252,0.10738258691711958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117544959818014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175369800496632,0.3284890437191047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754907395388736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688253506934775,0.0,0.09479989722021163,0.08830065979645217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589739391138151,0.14974191060906303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429105466023467,0.0,0.054755001429633694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072963725518156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057596734997705026,0.0,0.0,0.1109707572535971,0.11386826603566172,0.0,0.3701256658585695,0.102402454236489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704192541665153,0.0,0.08083017949077076,0.0,0.0,0.09835008399274796,0.0,0.10056086338538417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269818751313385,0.0,0.07265688515984184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114704013739974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251870638569142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21213153064047566,0.1670281106258492,0.0,0.0,0.11839703900774153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048782268440349,0.2136659822648325,0.08879885179345835,0.0,0.0,0.11731786288747408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430647140151153,0.0,0.0,0.061111203700657465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090762662857197,0.08318737785974556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051774849567555,0.0,0.11365388373112975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rcarroll271,2020/02/21,Got in a heated argument with my Dad and called him out on his verbal abuse and he denied it and says he doesn’t believe me. I love him to death and he is my hero and the ultimate one I look up to. But he really pisses me off sometimes...like how can you deny that? So what all my tears were fake and for nothing??,2.0627941176470586,2.862544397058823,3.943411764705882,91.01335294117649,75.61764705882355,7.2047058823529415,20.95294117647059,7.554174236665415,0.4652435294117652,241,5,57,3,5,82,54,68,0.284,0.624,0.092,-0.9364,0,0,0,0,1,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,2,4,1,0,2,0,4,2,1,1,1,11,7,9,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,2,11,2,9,5,1,5,0,0,1,1,12,5,1,0,0,40,14,0,0.0,0.4113132754678257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3911165964318145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3544766297731682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27764573969767586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915166486519928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3133143657353413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3330975945261617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23523627548410314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223917150256524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760657959249587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TrickyTDT,2020/02/21,"Is it possible to have schizoaffective disorder bipolar type, schizoid, schizotypal, and high-functioning autism? I havent been diagnosed with schizoid or schizotypal.. but my doctor wont listen. They literally are described on wikipedia and other sites like i personally filled them in with my own experience. I just found out about high-functioning autism tonight, and i swear i have it big time. I also have schizoaffective disorder. Linguistic issues is a sign. Thats why this post is written this. lol",6.121869281045751,9.566408847058828,5.307450980392158,73.83241830065361,72.29411764705883,10.366013071895424,34.150326797385624,10.25414643259724,4.671875816993465,412,21,63,14,9,124,61,85,0.081,0.826,0.09300000000000001,0.4451,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,10,3,0,0,0,11,13,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,1,6,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,1,10,1,7,9,1,9,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,3,42,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17869069982020136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267942739106379,0.0,0.0,0.5121798563284009,0.2287077474916595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185743046766171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24499839651802235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4721686143682756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332208947997715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916504858885732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19510553601487116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519032215660795,0.2140007166092283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029389912666142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20162640474296026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,screaming_hamster,2020/02/21,"I’ve been feeling “off” as if my body is warning me that I’m gonna have another psychosis soon When I watch a creepy video my brain thinks “Oh your heart is beating fast, you’re gonna see things”, when I lay in bed my whole body feels anxious and starts seeing something for a split second like and eye watching me or something. I’ve had a psychosis 2,5 years ago which escalated into many panic attacks and hallucinations and after that a depression. After that I was totally fine for a year and now I start feeling “off” again and I don’t know why. I’m not using any fucked up drugs. How can I get rid of these thoughts and feelings?",3.478828125,4.993666726562502,4.152000000000001,88.09300000000002,73.140625,6.682500000000001,26.8625,7.1686216300943375,1.1880506250000002,503,18,104,5,10,160,91,128,0.13699999999999998,0.775,0.08800000000000001,-0.8015,0,0,3,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,6,6,2,1,5,0,8,7,5,2,1,21,26,13,0,1,3,0,4,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,6,8,0,0,7,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,4,9,12,2,11,20,2,18,0,1,5,1,1,5,1,2,14,61,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14853355677781488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394787057270088,0.17570331245591536,0.0,0.18929730660890934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19062590585926928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722471001446001,0.0,0.18705455001274954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14432086026712146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943186622630031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388974222943337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15490832085333786,0.08754420195693338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985617151395797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208766448812768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186230390374033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16988151536741994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965978427198965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26705035644836383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579947477873545,0.0,0.0,0.2372024184384397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132071270483147,0.10736693041280483,0.0,0.1330254698475537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471972344365802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511985954611806,0.18707693094125544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21580880153401452
mentalhealth,yurpitsafrog,2020/02/21,"i don’t know how to keep liking people i have trouble not hating someone for more than two weeks. i talk to that person and everything is fine for a bit, but out of nowhere, I’ll start disliking them for no reason at all. no matter who it is, how much they meant to me or didn’t. it’s stressing me out a bit bcs i feel like I can never have steady relationships bcs of that? I can’t imagine being with someone for more than two weeks non stop. is this normal? am i a bad person bcs of this?",0.91057142857143,2.7168191523809533,2.7773809523809554,93.85178571428574,81.28571428571429,5.342857142857143,19.07142857142857,6.2581,-0.1642571428571431,381,9,87,3,10,127,68,105,0.17300000000000001,0.7170000000000001,0.11,-0.8704,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,0,2,7,1,1,3,0,11,0,0,3,2,20,17,5,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,7,4,0,2,5,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,2,1,11,3,16,14,6,8,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,7,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15164564431991678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3965653892059928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16322891619584778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918328503840299,0.12974981827055188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17931277649207306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143276577143273,0.0,0.0,0.09981395146532952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774613369577079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13351206460990536,0.0,0.14007703063284993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17794966105016002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12591288046545418,0.3171682669189355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186736262139103,0.0,0.1949925928712898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077731501079847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855202058319992,0.0,0.0,0.15184298368811688,0.2080458243008399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459797871248118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35483394069084073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913702371752068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,somevelvet_morning,2020/02/21,"Watching Roomate's Pets I usually don't have issues with anger at all; I'm Big Lebowski chill about everything 99℅ of the time. I'm watching my roommate's animals for about a week (three ferrets, a cat and a dog), and I find myself getting disproportionately angry. She didn't set boundaries with any of them, so they weren't very well behaved in the first place, but they've been especially outright awful with just me in the house. Peeing on electronics in front of me, scratching me up, pooping in the house (on purpose), the ferrets broke out of their cage while I was sleeping etc. I don't understand why I'm able to be so calm with humans, but while they're acting like this, I can feel myself flipping out. Of course, I haven't hurt them or anything, but I've noticed myself raising my voice more in the past day than I have in months. 

I know it isn't their fault, I know this is a result of how they have (or haven't) been trained. I'm just having trouble understanding my reaction. 

I did grow up with an emotionally neglectful and manipulative alcoholic mom who used to abuse our animals if that makes any difference.",8.811643835616437,6.931403977168954,8.468808219178081,73.35170547945206,61.73972602739726,11.49972602739726,38.33835616438356,10.125756701596842,3.660926575342466,897,36,173,15,10,288,133,219,0.126,0.81,0.063,-0.9286,0,0,1,0,1,0,28.0,1,0,6,1,8,9,1,0,11,1,18,4,3,5,1,31,30,14,0,1,8,1,2,1,0,0,1,1,1,1,5,10,1,1,6,0,0,3,7,6,1,2,6,5,27,3,30,23,3,28,0,3,2,0,11,15,0,3,10,113,32,0,0.16152511549054688,0.19138084907395125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17262122553500794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21968523493159192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292140721693602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417033685200024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16875936681926254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18169401424068732,0.0,0.0,0.18014320100795053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14516835860333233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167195167870714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476310292841634,0.13739318072111567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439020614052263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37275659299791375,0.1729159768745299,0.0,0.0,0.1685902550296492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17753995845379694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891301247995011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078192688530174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891762630635279,0.12892780614506374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18389741456724476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15419399968350986,0.0,0.0,0.16875936681926254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16164176699720725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418659379310793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363066834296216,0.0,0.13950583843368372,0.17789709461640765,0.1332751365582688,0.0,0.0,0.12956570460174502,0.0,0.1452304772125355,0.0,0.14575129310566493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WayneSeldon,2020/02/21,"GF in hospital. I’m the only one she trusts. I am in over my head. My partner / gf had a ‘psychotic break’ I believe. I’ve been very poorly educated on mental health until a few nights ago. A few weeks ago she started going on about what can be best described as a conspiracy about her, related to sex and politics which was plausible but unlikely. 

I didn’t think much of it, I say yes, she must know, she’s smart. Even if I didn’t believe her I’m not going to deny men come onto her and like most women she has had unpleasant encounters. Anyway, couple days ago she calls and says she knows. She’s convinced I’m involved in this conspiracy. She breaks up with me we fight and I block her after an hour and a half of trying to explain how it’s impossible. 

Anyway, her family takes her to the hospital that night. I wake up the next day and I get a message to call the family. So I do and I get yelled at and they leave me hanging with a “she’s in the hospital” So I give them my keys to her apartment and everything they ask. They’re still apprehensive of me because I’m her weird younger bf of 6 months. Fair. But after getting terrorized by one family member from the start and saying I took advantage of her and that I am mentally ill myself, they said I could message her. I texted her and she’s scared of her doctor, she’s mad at her family for calling her crazy. And she apologized for everything she did to me, and admitted she was confused and didn’t mean it. She also says I’m the one she trusts, the only one who doesn’t call her crazy. I tried to tell her to listen to the doctor but she wasn’t having it. When I was talking to her I just said neutral stuff like “ I understand” and “that would make me feel bad too” 

I want to tell her doctor because I don’t want her to get further damaged by me not knowing what I’m doing if she’s delusional or something worse. I feel like I’m crossing the line with the family if I offer the doctor my insight, recollections, and the trust she puts in me. I have 0 experience with this outside of recently watched Ted Talks but I’d do anything to help her. Anyway I think I just wanted to type some of this out. I’m not doing this because of my dick, I want to marry her but if I gotta go then I’ll do that too. There’s a lot not on here but I have to sleep",1.0873507494284027,3.161509134854775,3.2533804725209627,89.25776822762302,82.13278008298755,6.590295537302057,21.662460834956388,7.745696148679241,0.9422954018121774,1801,57,390,32,49,613,221,482,0.131,0.76,0.109,-0.9538,0,0,1,0,1,0,40.0,1,0,4,2,18,19,2,4,22,1,29,11,4,2,1,68,71,36,0,11,17,0,2,3,4,3,6,8,0,3,17,24,0,1,13,0,1,8,10,9,0,5,14,11,88,10,56,52,7,47,0,1,1,2,79,17,1,9,23,273,105,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051839727229429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170209344969552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349329559774093,0.0,0.07213099195362556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442252595666892,0.14110181491197554,0.0,0.0,0.17385810027829776,0.08097107616962207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151420011713084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06646356639090392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06160325513465754,0.08537229417740974,0.0,0.09951922912560868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158921381493046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096119696010323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13868672770214002,0.07547394568619946,0.3636818096636629,0.0,0.07802537572472898,0.055120680009599694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16124452535443168,0.07401562727739486,0.13154959663105004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918491627172825,0.08201384225064817,0.0,0.0,0.05171643278686279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598369458530373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720972451171836,0.0,0.0,0.08169768338228052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308443085590413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655957697415127,0.0,0.0,0.051502619869530586,0.0,0.0,0.08404614070310958,0.0,0.0,0.1555113812739532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061585650330775,0.0,0.05671896800223774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205690387030433,0.14481245729085562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091331963170139,0.1173621199754748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775636790952788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07618281981949628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678716274667314,0.24543205411993815,0.0772472020370421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721230693972952,0.0,0.0,0.059398908952550025,0.0,0.0,0.10922365650453092,0.0,0.061617348748912275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832583070479405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801214994761528,0.12403108137227307,0.13487651286647825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887764892580587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572380531226355,0.10476851355875208,0.0,0.0,0.08032272645008587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366226342693478,0.182035812453066,0.0,0.061890358775557736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862915217017208,0.05480982452089748,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trashit273,2020/02/21,"Inaudible Voices What's up yall! So a little background on me. 22 year old, dealt/dealing with suicidal and depressive thoughts, also in the closet about being gay. I'm on medicine now, Zoloft. I think it's working, as I dont have the thoughts often. But down to another problem...

I hear voices, no not audible actual voices, but they're in my head. I guess almost like a conscience. However, there's like three of them. One criticizes everything I do, one is just angry and rageful, and one tries to guide me, and the other comes in randomly whenever I do something I know is wrong (ie. Anything homosexual, I know people will say it's nothing wrong with it, but it doesn't feel like it). The voices are like loud in my head, and argue with me sometimes. I find myself even talking with them sometimes too, like legit one could ask a question and I could give an answer, or vice versa. I'm just not sure if this is purely my conscience or what. It's weird to explain, and honestly I feel crazy bringing it up, but any help anyone?",3.0636318407960172,5.156751805970154,4.3222139303482585,83.96351990049752,75.71641791044777,7.053731343283582,26.589552238805965,7.984000788550335,1.7710716417910453,807,31,152,13,18,265,123,201,0.177,0.723,0.1,-0.9484,1,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,2,1,10,14,2,0,8,0,13,4,2,0,2,43,29,17,1,4,11,0,2,5,0,1,1,8,1,0,11,12,0,0,11,0,0,2,5,7,0,5,2,10,21,7,19,23,0,15,0,1,0,1,12,10,0,8,8,103,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.12440382962470625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765458982494762,0.0,0.0,0.10194713489346216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669198319960186,0.13367576361880554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891382259737597,0.0,0.10490664431686804,0.0,0.1191782572610879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981426706175228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20356765905226476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142811938872073,0.10979987191289227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940769890210148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420051460749223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457240546068292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12891723861212465,0.09107301043098973,0.0,0.0,0.11651603909045542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222921414234451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14043555513909378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616661733612937,0.0,0.14368123324698098,0.0,0.0854483511783827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012130674441814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114057963099829,0.1277702360868747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232220789484335,0.0,0.1337706853154174,0.0,0.3455398185640771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837981608663947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198284844682528,0.0,0.0,0.14280877125665342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013786296770629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814170387017844,0.25216548391537685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944437822153213,0.0,0.12015007071568032,0.0,0.0,0.1024650273329057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168517832547924,0.0,0.20241258988311647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865517617572368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280825549287997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787626320713584,0.0,0.08209408786176649
mentalhealth,InfamouslyZen,2020/02/21,"I believe I have a separate sadistic personality Ok some context since I was young [M17] I have struggled with extreme bouts of violent anger stemming from my dad going to jail and being bullied and isolated from those of my age at the time. The problem is I would black out everytime during these episodes, only able to remember bits and pieces as well as from what witnesses told me. Not only was I told/remember that I seemed to enjoy myself when I was violent towards others like when I would hurt them and such but I recall feeling I don't know joy out of it? That being said in my normal life I while struggle with anger issues am not a super violent person just stressed. I am ashamed of those feelings of sadistic anger. It's not me. The best way I've described it to a select few is that simply when I have an episode like that it is really not me, it's like watching something take control while I'm a long for the awful ride.

I should also mention I have not had an episode in years as I have a much much more strong control over it, but there are times where I catch my thoughts and feelings stemming from those episodes.

I'm unsure of if this is even a mental illness or something but this seemed the best place to post about it. Any advice would be most helpful as I have been think much about it lately.",5.176700473292764,5.904099980842915,5.362398016677936,83.96210953346856,68.3486590038314,7.827000225377509,31.061753437006985,7.724431198458867,1.9890998873112464,1049,41,204,11,17,331,144,261,0.24,0.6779999999999999,0.083,-0.9936,0,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,6,12,23,6,4,13,2,26,2,0,2,0,39,40,20,0,7,11,1,3,3,0,4,2,1,0,2,20,9,0,2,9,0,0,3,6,12,1,0,8,6,28,11,31,25,11,26,0,1,2,0,8,9,0,6,15,155,48,0,0.1175682399950898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148863234395258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401927904783812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995043478339643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13245914628584587,0.24676122898170555,0.0,0.1283540681674441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637255563697061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765271370427758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17833810401562414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681674015036343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880351303657124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585923251891987,0.0,0.0,0.12271069736717935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461243002620187,0.0,0.13262209562654415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304192481445727,0.17231371038124269,0.0,0.0,0.10404419273889874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848113356989112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25927855191438925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519191309426885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17883188868812153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053121046905924,0.12283378767054726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259787505206095,0.0,0.0,0.11249692773766908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531722504769388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26636379471152,0.0,0.11183431909138893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140594202744821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725366304060774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810195500254778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467402169275627,0.24581570248901974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839668492830989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533298099138798,0.0,0.09333605005625704,0.13710997239975606,0.0,0.0,0.22468298318309413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332019655697832,0.0,0.0,0.10570796713359454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505513134847484,0.0,0.0,0.07571009193067715
mentalhealth,Euphoric-Earth,2020/02/21,"I don’t know what’s wrong? So I messed up, I think. I’ve been on and off depressed my whole life, gone through suicidal episodes and self harmed on and off for as long as I can remember. I had been doing really well throughout my senior year of high school, but as soon as I came to college, my mental health has just been declining faster and faster. I’ve been incredibly depressed and had lots of suicidal thoughts/intents. I went to therapy, but it just isn’t for me. He tried to tell me I was suffering the effects of childhood trauma but that didn’t feel right, so I stopped going. Now, I get drunk or high regularly and every time I do I end up in some sort of situation where I try to hurt/kill my self. Luckily, I have a significant other that’s been there to help me and stop me from doing it, but I feel like it’s so taxing on them. It makes me want to completely ghost them because I feel like I’m more of a burden to them than I’m worth. I think I really hurt them specifically last night, because I was extremely irritable (wasn’t being very nice) and I wanted to off myself and was frustrated that they wouldn’t leave. Internally, I wanted so badly to just apologize and hug them and tell them I love them and I’m sorry, I wanted to just be better for them, but I couldn’t. Worst part is they had an exam in the morning. Now they won’t text me back (completely understandably) and I’m afraid. After so many weeks of wanting to ghost them so they wouldn’t have to deal with me, I think they finally might be gone and Im realizing that’s not what I wanted at all. I am sad all of the time, don’t want to get out of bed or go to class/activities, but I can’t figure out what’s actually wrong. What am I supposed to do with myself? How can I fix this and get out of this rut? What actually works???",4.115939716312056,4.422639069148944,5.489680851063831,83.60833333333333,70.54255319148936,9.13900709219858,26.570921985815602,9.188382445141503,1.8174453900709209,1414,41,314,27,24,477,176,376,0.213,0.691,0.096,-0.9945,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,14,3,18,22,1,1,6,0,37,5,0,3,2,66,67,34,4,10,13,0,3,2,0,4,2,0,1,2,16,21,1,2,12,1,2,6,11,15,1,0,17,3,57,7,51,42,8,44,0,5,0,2,23,18,0,6,22,217,73,6,0.0,0.0,0.18634270470593414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341558315600752,0.07971894163967369,0.11640325265302015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444126072219295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919975226839768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20021071855452266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984321435891105,0.16446764677853692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456389544137619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044312178757694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482745626887486,0.13641695067281134,0.0,0.10458990737548407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14964768978974086,0.0,0.10852306146876768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148712126597416,0.0,0.0,0.06399592729290117,0.2017524606440297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20441926972680027,0.0,0.1031310713744244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05247142182932295,0.07782614153514103,0.0,0.10109589397393633,0.0,0.0,0.06743791968033562,0.09329005147279358,0.0,0.0,0.08449375335179687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117075917436614,0.08617132532185966,0.0,0.063731346865085,0.09679824874913316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962179186859405,0.10128554479022908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895982861587284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339181307848212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232946152586935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815633328370057,0.08153646271102649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662737851355514,0.0,0.0,0.19920575473124372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073196565757655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687819495199873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964536283667072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088717258321212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16690144787240258,0.0,0.1091857700985452,0.0,0.0,0.183532578251113,0.0,0.0,0.11134630280701324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964463740032736,0.0,0.0,0.0993944687378564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877816318774725,0.39420185197822216,0.0,0.0765855393904562,0.0,0.08584489597338699,0.08850772998829795,0.0,0.10659617238114748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695080746298346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20877726589216636,0.0,0.06148377593630808
mentalhealth,birdyandbun,2020/02/21,"My brain is angry I don’t know how else to describe it. It’s grouchy and uncomfortable. It’s angry at me for having the lights on, breathing too loudly, or focusing too hard on trying to sleep.",3.5476923076923086,4.990359153846153,4.910769230769233,83.0092307692308,72.84615384615384,7.2512820512820495,25.82051282051281,7.793537801064563,1.4383435897435906,153,5,30,2,3,51,32,39,0.31,0.69,0.0,-0.91,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,3,3,3,1,0,4,4,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,6,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5256052795054011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39332050889627296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4217738369676854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25875747277456185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4711729740986362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196646628101864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,birdie1819,2020/02/21,"Hospitalization Help Does anyone mind sharing their experiences with inpatient or outpatient/partial hospitalization programs? I’ve been struggling with ptsd symptoms and suicidal ideation, and I feel like at this point I need more assistance than can be provided by basic once a week therapy, but I also worry I’m not in bad enough shape to warrant such intense intervention? But I also know isolating myself and wishing I was dead is not normal or okay. Idk, I’m rambling a bit, just any personal experiences anyone is willing to share would be appreciated",7.0896875,9.84662692708334,7.6504166666666675,61.58625000000001,66.1875,10.633333333333336,38.04166666666667,10.686352973137794,5.150879166666666,459,25,64,14,8,151,74,96,0.16399999999999998,0.647,0.18899999999999997,0.162,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,1,2,1,9,1,0,0,0,19,15,9,2,4,7,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,1,7,4,8,9,3,5,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,2,42,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962492979971363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259595926442686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590277490096477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465543406096247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20221811406538454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16209195585251024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19138730495985734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3623718771363813,0.0,0.0,0.0936555045869672,0.13232503019757166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415265067558084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179501072015257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049175206883414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870248061371414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734225331026048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18148152025161146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19725895734100135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617316349925285,0.0,0.0,0.1750978300393377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216518527232262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19363775716146456,0.0,0.2026064744288624,0.0,0.0,0.19252006474957706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21182133531320274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857660668351572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21300001641715927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18810533845216945,0.0,0.13157877739513096,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GoogleBabies,2020/02/21,"I am so fucking hopeless I've tried everything I can do in my life, I can't make new friends, and I can't get out of the hole that I am in. I would get therapy but it's too expensive, even under insurance. The only people I have in my life are too fucking stupid to understand my problems. On top of that I don't believe that working a full time 5 days a week is how I want to live my life. Work just gives me anxiety that I never ever have felt in my whole life. And when I tried to get medication for it, they charged me 300 dollars. I don't ever believe their is a solution to my mental dilemma. There is no solo activity in this world that makes me happy, I **only** find happiness in trying to make others happy. All that gets me is nowhere. If you're going to try to say something like: ""just find something that makes you happy,"" first of all, thanks for trying, but all I do is try new things, and I'm sick of it. There is a void in my life that only gets temporarily patched in the presence of others.  

I'm usually a pretty big optimist but fuck man, this shit is so FUCKING painful. Life is shit for me and I seriously just want to end it all.",1.4605922293474158,3.2366527676348578,3.6158826857789528,88.6497463221426,79.41493775933608,6.705469634100339,24.232553753300643,7.686295010490155,1.1569734439834023,891,32,195,14,22,305,119,241,0.17800000000000002,0.68,0.14300000000000002,-0.8611,0,0,2,0,0,1,30.0,0,1,2,4,14,18,7,0,8,0,21,15,2,5,7,32,43,12,0,5,7,0,1,1,1,1,9,1,0,1,17,5,0,0,4,0,2,1,6,11,0,1,1,2,30,7,27,41,6,28,0,1,0,4,7,15,6,1,13,134,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632811459546861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953708210673626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05591673173449541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679376797115986,0.0,0.0,0.05726699461649285,0.1568569717020445,0.0,0.0,0.07792372003070562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324917583271982,0.0,0.1584912732287376,0.07375014673751777,0.0,0.0,0.0669870851688521,0.3206247976139974,0.2264955965575224,0.0831741164193865,0.04927572670614451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36919092278773297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3674484432883971,0.042359061922506686,0.0,0.07656098030301801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315016468010143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734488425729284,0.0873769648816428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687126014284249,0.16747800155992396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978262764729836,0.0922588796510172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060109447972303214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820886192090784,0.0,0.08296375809426731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895028453219444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800026163581845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334975315385269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07982514372195476,0.09915326926386482,0.0,0.05760210423916597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05055764104514345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3531968395470077,0.0,0.0,0.09026163861104446,0.0,0.0,0.09549190697294754,0.0,0.102280210371824,0.0,0.06954850070706613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680161593462164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624269322942902,0.0,0.0,0.061591840714150976,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Brickhandsagholor,2020/02/21,"anyone with a doctors note for reptile/amphibian/aquarium So it sounds odd but I know theres service emus, pigs or peacocks but what about fish and reptiles? Does anyone have a service fish or reptile",3.0194594594594584,6.104042297297301,3.2419459459459468,84.99967567567569,85.48648648648648,5.122162162162162,31.72432432432432,6.742157984588678,2.265252972972973,163,9,26,2,5,50,30,37,0.055999999999999994,0.9440000000000001,0.0,-0.1979,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,2,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,16,3,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6930875764264831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5072804014545969,0.4337138444416643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723756722671076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw33333333333,2020/02/21,Everyday I wake up and wish I didnt But then I remember my ex wants me dead so everyday that I live is another fuck you,-0.5322222222222202,1.3823128148148172,3.216296296296296,88.03333333333335,87.51851851851852,9.525925925925927,23.814814814814817,9.725611199111238,2.6323925925925917,94,4,23,4,3,35,23,27,0.264,0.644,0.092,-0.7269,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,5,5,4,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,7,0,1,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,3,15,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4396889484732334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38765049875111385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3702633410790613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47500281366134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24732319432597424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4821922253870261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MagicMoons,2020/02/21,"What do I do about my mother? I don’t know if this is the right place to post this but I need the opinions of others. Recently I learned my mother doesn’t just imagine things in her minds eye but she physically sees them in the real world. My mother has always been quirky to the point of me worrying about her mental health, her mind works so differently that sometimes the things she thinks just don’t make sense. But this time I really don’t know what to make of it, she seems to think being able to see the things you imagine manifest in the real world is normal. What disorder is this? Is this normal and somehow I didn’t know about it? Should I be concerned or just let it slide? I really don’t know what to do and would appreciate any insight.",3.9929078868151713,5.212780536423843,4.611318482841664,86.45148705599037,71.4503311258278,7.875015051173992,23.66104756170981,8.296473431620573,1.1766238410596026,595,15,124,9,11,190,80,151,0.052000000000000005,0.9229999999999999,0.024,-0.6199,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,1,1,8,0,0,0,7,0,20,2,1,2,0,34,32,8,0,6,8,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,17,2,0,0,11,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,3,20,0,15,25,0,12,0,0,3,0,11,8,0,5,2,91,37,2,0.1464400591842907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218498603098822,0.0,0.0,0.09958426188891936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529986936697937,0.16783299479694347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15565893506701334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32191850715713755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14974488213349788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19549975326241892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14757713658826005,0.0,0.29572542881564995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858344834989918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869603316640773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529986936697937,0.0,0.13843318953931466,0.0,0.14024909692734894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3333616943214227,0.1876265034509571,0.0,0.14459189178411194,0.0,0.0,0.1250590104084947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333875350230055,0.1333135299773957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448329629958811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918648049834195,0.18766575386972947,0.0,0.0,0.08539037615012061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10661010717885087,0.1487169884712787,0.0,0.10402681647396356,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,collegeGangIsh,2020/02/21,"Best i’ve ever felt but feels like mania I’ve been a depressive my entire life. I never felt joy in anything but could always put a good fake around people. This summer was the lowest I’ve ever been: moldy food in my room, bills not paid, rent always late, drinking on my drive to work, the works. I ended up having to move home for obvious reasons. In October I was offered a job in my field, doing exactly what I want to do(not my dream job but its exactly what I need to do in order to get my dream job), i’m being paid a very good salary for my location and experience level, it’s in the city I want to be, I could go on forever about how perfect my life is right now. One thing I need to add is that I started taking concerta in September. Having concerta and money is making me feel so fucking happy that it feels like i’m manic. I’ve never been a confident or stuck up person but I can’t help but notice that I make more money than most people in the room that i’m in. I’ve never had a date before and I have two in the next two weeks. I started going to the gym 6 days a week and have seen the beginnings of a 6pack for the first time in my entire life. I feel absolutely limitless, and I don’t want it to change but knowing how life goes there is going to be a dramatic fall in the future and that has been scaring me. I also feel like this isn’t sustainable, I mean every day on my drive to work I think about all of the things that I don’t have and make a plan to do it because I know I can. I have the money, drive, and now confidence I can do it. Fuck man, I love this feeling but I also don’t because i’m not content with anything. I always need more now, nothing is enough.",3.9302348484848513,3.836207675000004,5.607373737373738,84.00590909090911,70.8611111111111,8.545454545454545,25.808080808080806,8.296473431620573,1.4374444444444443,1313,34,288,18,22,452,166,360,0.08,0.768,0.152,0.9764,7,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,7,14,15,2,1,21,0,35,9,0,6,10,58,75,21,0,8,10,0,8,3,0,0,4,0,4,2,19,11,2,0,13,4,7,9,10,5,0,4,13,9,38,10,39,57,6,55,0,1,1,3,5,22,2,2,26,194,57,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007966704504435,0.21862740500483094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14414615792858515,0.07796714931951708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677917148486717,0.0,0.07452640562188548,0.0,0.0919126139485593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265085705909266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985527857639213,0.0,0.0,0.11296715963016925,0.0,0.07543482960663775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579767838791018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757225409911092,0.09049631555813624,0.0,0.0,0.1584470874076355,0.07379218106334308,0.0,0.0,0.08567266190828696,0.0,0.0,0.26570659214736386,0.18770724147316412,0.16818620551768115,0.0,0.0,0.07449777857908953,0.10590531821096312,0.0,0.0,0.16193754342363836,0.045758332824841264,0.0,0.1493257575693999,0.14692038484865375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323338608782264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058704820861932225,0.0,0.08785256403940225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26073687200716805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962662953460469,0.0,0.0987970721873426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474489338058003,0.1283654130405486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904678360705925,0.0,0.17538634687864707,0.0,0.0,0.09540320877208937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308652287625828,0.0,0.19482433117971545,0.20264747468869296,0.0,0.09314516842342377,0.0,0.0,0.08403793874163701,0.09971345593567812,0.0,0.0,0.05934828721013551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214375982596903,0.07647381355355325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804477883164058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900495767324864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07479512587197694,0.0,0.0,0.08768553655583891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398293624405775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658512717713084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163720750976082,0.05611944168075883,0.0,0.0,0.051070162090215164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17111109435042846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722648792414914,0.15497559264027772,0.0,0.1405070778943117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912836914258552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jaeagrrl,2020/02/21,"resurfaced memories and progress i was watching a movie and a girl stepped in a puddle which reminded me of something i used to do. i had OC tendencies when i was in middle school and am now much better after therapy (currently in uni) but some thoughts still spring up. i used to walk outside a lot to meet with friends in town and i walked home from school. if i was ever having one of my bad days or i was upset, i’d purposely step in puddles because i thought i deserved it. it’d wet my whole shoe and soak my sock and i would squeak the rest of the way home and it’d be miserable and unclean and gross. i haven’t felt the urge to do that in a while and i kind of forgot that i even did it in the first place. it makes me proud of my progress. i’ve been working on positive self-talk and this feels like a super clear sign that i’m getting better with my relationship with myself. go me :)",1.4624731182795718,3.464382344086019,2.7776344086021503,93.55311827956993,80.39784946236558,6.068817204301076,23.77419354838709,7.1686216300943375,0.7897225806451611,700,25,156,9,18,226,114,186,0.08199999999999999,0.7170000000000001,0.201,0.975,1,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,8,5,11,0,2,10,0,16,1,1,3,2,31,27,16,0,2,3,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,2,1,10,14,0,1,4,0,0,5,1,4,0,2,11,4,23,7,23,12,5,28,0,1,1,0,4,12,0,4,11,107,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912547054499755,0.1015734589874439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29473372048736096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10745976950429133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100546804293183,0.1507224537395878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425094290353125,0.11903740856503853,0.159986769056595,0.0,0.0,0.1417317057611976,0.0,0.0,0.12873457565776195,0.0,0.08705503288488273,0.0,0.0946972054651063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33427825619203866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735149893345412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140488346536316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14165918202567082,0.0,0.0,0.11122392543980714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248903617106795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290986309568928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17408835574615775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788936065896905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372681379537434,0.0,0.0,0.17382690858795186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282765777212982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306747152686302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339273980791192,0.0,0.0,0.1905509698113975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645643319200673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878221515955231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13225969730808868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860316047327233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12130546882147653,0.0,0.0,0.11836609188667233,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatzombiesguy,2020/02/21,"Advice for someone with possible Dependent Personality Disorder? I was just doing some reading on how to stop depending on other people for happiness and I ran into this article on something called Dependent Personality Disorder. It described having a fear of having to take care of yourself, and basically depending on other people for everything. It sounded almost exactly like me. Often times I find myself depending on other people for a lot of things. Happiness being probably the biggest one. Another aspect of it was avoiding confrontation out of fear of losing someone you depend on and I related to that as well. So how can I fix this? I don’t want to rely on anyone else to live my life. I am currently seeing a therapist and plan to bring it up in the next session but is there anyone on this sub who knows about this sort of thing? What are some things I can do on my own to get better?",5.8631237524950075,7.458628401197604,7.4315119760479025,66.56946357285432,67.38323353293413,10.836127744510977,33.07834331337325,10.864195022040775,4.293184031936127,721,32,112,22,12,249,104,167,0.086,0.821,0.09300000000000001,0.4889,1,1,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,3,8,11,1,3,5,0,13,1,0,8,1,29,21,9,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,17,7,0,2,2,1,0,2,1,5,1,1,3,2,13,6,34,17,4,20,0,1,1,0,5,14,0,12,5,99,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204492662579606,0.0,0.0,0.13531056712162845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416928557796551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18896843310162187,0.13845398493842262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950919999066305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798017858715275,0.0,0.13777138511474493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3097354034394884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288159947143052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144378968772836,0.0,0.0,0.3041117743707188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350399111943425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059848678345815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876912496219657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426248248265313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544447537971576,0.06601641971737604,0.0,0.11931996555788453,0.0,0.0,0.1511729909133923,0.0,0.11488047914724862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143709517719014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156582007181477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810409649943815,0.2359760586605201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523358347569398,0.0,0.0,0.145690186649384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516396253289867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767903892431592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289860067954953,0.10402767050653687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129725529418538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159898433399173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689332070142875,0.2693179110302493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879387077227125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970163868407354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149575637926048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thrwmeaway13579,2020/02/21,What to expect on a therapy intake session? I am starting therapy for the first time next week. What should I expect from the initial intake session? Is there anything I should do before to prepare? I am pretty nervous.,3.17625,6.225134125,4.3450000000000015,78.16000000000003,82.75,5.2,30.5,6.742157984588678,2.3046,175,9,25,2,5,57,28,40,0.054000000000000006,0.85,0.096,0.3899,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,5,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,22,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480453429982105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564886655399154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563901432518241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205666468288505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30665542706611193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21334866213929085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6894066530044336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17576210222568178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24178324854997346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i0613085482,2020/02/21,"I’m... sad? Sooo, I’m young. Like 18 minus six young (I don’t want to type my actual age unless I get flagged) and I have had some suicidal thoughts. I always have to pretend I’m happy, because my parents are at the edge of a divorce, and my sister (my twin) really just doesn’t care. I always have to be the upbeat one, excited and distracting my parents from the real problem, there impending divorce. My sister calls me fat all the time, which wouldn’t really matter if it weren’t semi true. I try and try to keep being happy, but it’s just so hard, because I really don’t know what to do. Some people might say, “you’re to young, you should be happy” and yeah, I should, but it’s just so hard. I really don’t know what to do.",0.6726315789473674,2.747354421052634,3.0978947368421035,89.77276315789473,83.73684210526315,6.16842105263158,18.71052631578948,7.413659706084162,0.4721500000000005,560,14,120,9,16,193,83,152,0.09300000000000001,0.757,0.149,0.8141,3,0,0,0,2,0,28.0,0,1,0,0,7,10,0,1,5,1,19,1,1,0,2,28,29,11,1,6,7,4,2,1,0,4,1,1,0,0,6,5,1,1,3,1,0,0,6,3,0,2,3,3,17,7,11,19,3,6,0,1,0,0,9,1,0,4,6,78,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.147158973586215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509552357526633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18385246913258735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398358380137056,0.0,0.15375057375974796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878673674135085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4815879726206886,0.2701742252363757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403790212055894,0.0,0.0,0.16575138997146008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367322612498432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15997488964188095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218593186892944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3348909413455666,0.0,0.0,0.10454568046887028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442951621884206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17164332888150852,0.3864251734654152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992215297438677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649506420610488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971829588359928,0.08793264893067826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20476650052811685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894570281820394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,king_of_kashmir,2020/02/21,"I want to deal with my mental health issues privately, but I don't think that's possible in college. In short, I want to get help privately, without exciting my parents. They'll just tell the rest of my family that I'm not 100% with it mentally and everybody'll judge me.

In high school, my plan was to just wait until I turned 18 to get help as an adult somehow. I don't think was well-thought out...

Well, now I'm in college, and the mental health services are supposed to be better than other school's, but the thing is I'm on my parent's insurance. Even if I could get therapy there, my parents would be told by the insurance company since I think they require insurance (they said they do a free couple of sessions, but they might still ask for insurance?).

So, now I look until past college, when I'm on my own health plan. That would suck. I'm not even halfway through college yet and I haven't enjoyed it as much as I could.",5.4818181818181815,5.4436398556149745,5.93197860962567,82.81208556149734,67.55614973262033,9.580748663101604,31.973262032085557,9.339509955726095,2.6141379679144388,731,28,151,13,11,236,102,187,0.059000000000000004,0.8290000000000001,0.11199999999999999,0.8319,3,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,5,4,13,6,1,0,6,0,16,3,0,0,0,28,36,14,0,7,9,3,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,1,7,6,0,2,3,0,1,0,6,1,1,0,4,2,23,6,26,24,3,17,0,0,1,0,16,9,1,3,8,102,30,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913638182249563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324727080755287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18641519246559232,0.1291708742949,0.0,0.0,0.1203540792545487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15421167791911058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100523249891469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18297589852759347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.372268303547714,0.0,0.0,0.15649706741183378,0.1233424913487206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184649857622748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803241436786417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3529401653460441,0.12384296471190495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581752144001943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3888787214440861,0.0,0.1114417850521398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316070995879246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104671796598324,0.0,0.0,0.2362947457555168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656874721974944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322892029926058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203613043715284,0.0,0.13350265826541466,0.0,0.07755703966901578,0.22440732938655414,0.0,0.09267872430274524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155031866783167,0.0,0.0,0.1269798771607948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377128568120811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099270225528748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125334421754755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658578587240956,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hidatsu,2020/02/21,"Today was a bad day Its been one of the darkest days Ive had in years. Im right on the cusp of losing everything, and Im afraid to move. It might already be too late to fix the things my poor mental health has messed up. My marriage, my family, my life. All because Ive let the darkness control me and wrap around with an iron grip. 

Today broke me. Ive been crying for hours and I cant stop. Fear is gnawing at me like a rabid animal. My anxiety keeps reminding me that I have never been completely on my own before. My depression keeps telling me this is all my fault. If only I had done more laundry. If only I hadnt lived like a slob for all those years. If only I could stop those behaviors. If only...

I dont have any friends that are local, no family close enough to help. And if they were, theyre just as broke as me and couldnt help anyways. 

I keep falling into the darkness. Nothing sounds good. Not food or sleep or anything that might make me feel better. I just lay on the couch and cry as I hold my dog. The fear is crippling. I feel like im drowning, and theres nothing to grab onto. Nothing to help pull me out of this pit. 

I guess if youve read this far, youd like something to take away from this. I only really have one piece of advice. Save youraelf while you still have a chance to. Go get that extra help. Ignore whatever anyone else says and you do you. Maybe sit back and enjoy how good you have it (if you have it good right now, that is) and hug your family extra tight for me.",1.2333333333333345,3.1315796369426745,2.7346751592356675,94.09859447983015,80.65605095541402,5.715329087048832,19.383864118895964,6.742157984588678,0.05302029723991542,1162,28,261,12,30,379,171,314,0.168,0.7120000000000001,0.12,-0.9368,0,0,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,7,1,3,10,23,0,3,12,0,34,5,1,3,4,50,44,24,1,9,12,0,5,4,1,2,2,2,1,0,16,15,1,9,2,1,1,4,7,11,0,2,9,7,41,12,30,28,9,36,0,4,0,1,16,16,0,12,19,172,57,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374600219288712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457315845755256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058279602708472135,0.0,0.06556101230998028,0.0,0.0,0.059924115289043074,0.0878107779114168,0.07052460131393262,0.07629203858582184,0.0,0.0,0.08051888835512304,0.06589876078357887,0.07155673549401023,0.05224251971622575,0.0,0.0729252186721185,0.0,0.0,0.0757955491379934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985584314093474,0.0,0.09612093224344262,0.06842525603863556,0.0,0.188276996556715,0.11054007972147507,0.0,0.07381412532449573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770185351755555,0.10044090597804542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159216880525142,0.0,0.0,0.0885520178523157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702251148446733,0.0,0.2423737598453332,0.1928748492966151,0.08666597730598963,0.06122479460600224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10362996074517228,0.0,0.06621236171342706,0.0,0.044775222949209284,0.0,0.0487058398217378,0.21564573864273834,0.0,0.0,0.09440928742864088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109613026854,0.0,0.0,0.22977423170972155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439819852694537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27771528235696913,0.0,0.0,0.2285248964224109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667443415936416,0.0,0.0,0.08763505470474645,0.060533134052930135,0.1674766724233348,0.0,0.07567553220415578,0.0,0.0,0.0958774710399589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05720606717177399,0.0,0.0860981497063523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636642704458022,0.1818303853224816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108657501368647,0.0,0.0,0.06609787623464733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466971944379516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614639902461273,0.32589727162165044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085724168220092,0.0,0.05490223992872845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14637633102812056,0.0,0.06815285615401268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857628685389448,0.0,0.0,0.06597679854107652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844091039264302,0.14329970727639094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443646857362388,0.0,0.07490643072605227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05693592058416092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624690095961335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037723786483013
mentalhealth,marblegh0st,2020/02/21,"How to help my boyfriend My boyfriend shut me out completely for 3 days and today he finally confronted me and said that he feels like he doesn’t want to be here anymore and has met with a counselor at his college twice now. What is the best thing for me to do in this situation? 
I want to be there for him but he’s just someone who is hard to be there for. No matter what you do it’s not the right thing or the best thing. I constantly feel like I’m walking on eggshells as it is so now it’s extra tense. 
I just feel so stuck. Our relationship has had a lot of issues and i am ready for it to end but i can’t just walk away from him when he’s dealing with this. 
What do i do?",2.0015863331299566,2.8114201409395956,3.3933984136668687,94.85951799877978,75.77852348993287,7.028920073215375,23.61256863941428,7.348242739294969,0.5558402684563757,527,15,133,6,11,173,88,149,0.08,0.775,0.145,0.8396,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,1,0,2,12,5,1,0,5,0,16,0,0,1,0,22,25,12,0,2,7,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,14,7,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,4,5,16,4,21,18,4,17,0,0,0,0,16,7,0,2,10,98,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17700022958559186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16768407282400172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3745990923248215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18712868561290694,0.1928691463549268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11510225213390834,0.18400091448525585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807675751328604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27072847775504977,0.255006573664258,0.0,0.19551172921064272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987943569196286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196286976577482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18628256976179666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17438871244158918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517339089951318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916164263688326,0.0,0.15241752496368055,0.16977154229323693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20061449677063664,0.0,0.0,0.1512221317937394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3557145627034196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16917437506468075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105395325754389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Werewolfoflndn_326,2020/02/21,"Workplace advice Need advice about ADA situation at work

Hi guys! I work as a parts advisor at a motorcycle dealership and I have recently had to file for accommodations due to my disorder. My doc recommended that I take on a modified schedule or have less customer interaction. I submitted this to my boss but feel like he is mad at me about it. He is a little cold and it really plays into my paranoia. I currently feel like I am going to get fired and that everyone at work hates me because I’ve missed 6 or 7 times over a 3 month period. Any advice on how to train myself to stay positive and look at this positively? I get stuck in negative self talk a lot. I have a lot of shame regarding my disorder(Schizoaffective bipolar type) All help would be greatly appreciated",4.996529484029483,6.592220925675676,6.799164619164617,70.27998771498773,69.47297297297297,11.057493857493858,31.022113022113015,11.022393298168332,3.9020324324324336,619,26,113,21,11,215,99,148,0.185,0.644,0.171,-0.3639,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,3,8,2,1,7,0,9,1,0,2,1,17,20,9,0,2,3,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,6,5,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,4,0,0,2,5,16,4,21,16,5,20,0,1,1,0,8,11,0,4,9,73,22,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4672274710004161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838261199092468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715544514185256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18266117566490706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229265890342572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16117276979659093,0.2277195742462315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665370177619908,0.0,0.09057827942818394,0.0,0.0,0.17571498061881455,0.0,0.1578094327131859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735293376111045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068278190119136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572823390361573,0.1597387833418048,0.0,0.0,0.13383751136795055,0.0,0.0,0.27099521913172403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721412426841372,0.0,0.0,0.11817688385611473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17259101261724955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021017284107705,0.0,0.15736670239873415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662661767143544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914772602050166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698759092996896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983253912033358,0.1281021253659913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293468496418517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34808758918848703,0.0,0.0,0.11321766986760436,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,weeb_lord_6969,2020/02/21,"Could I be depressed? I just feel bad all the time. I just sit in my room with the lights off playing games I don't even enjoy anymore. I just do it to try and stop myself from thinking about the feeling slowly gnawing at me. I still have moments of happiness but the moment they end, I look back at and tell myself ""You should've held on to it longer"".",2.3964840182648395,3.91748839726028,3.2180136986301378,93.66117579908678,75.98630136986301,5.414611872146119,23.125570776255714,5.46131890053228,0.15803378995433806,275,8,60,1,6,87,56,73,0.11199999999999999,0.8170000000000001,0.071,-0.4337,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,0,7,5,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,0,1,14,10,3,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,2,3,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,13,3,11,7,1,14,0,1,1,0,4,6,0,0,7,45,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29840538236557484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23136843762895076,0.25123340554839024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402388815172535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25915902891351217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26650222646209604,0.0,0.0,0.19873724094147613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30428146943044737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32030660010548434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526746588480828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402938434525878,0.251560340368998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629940781794884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19280032956916995,0.0,0.0,0.1754533506971852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042868551390854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,safesqace,2020/02/21,"my dad doesn’t love me, i’m mad at my siblings, and i need to vent i was the second of five children. my dad doesn’t have one picture of me up on any of his social media accounts, whereas he has many photos of my siblings. there are even pictures which he cut me out of in order to post. i was the only one he didn’t get a christmas present for this year. i know i shouldn’t hold this to my siblings, but i do. i hate them because he loves them more than me and it’s obvious. when i opened up to him about being assaulted, he didn’t care. there has been times where he’s ignored me for days at a time. i want to feel loved, i want to be cared about. i want my dad to hold my in his arms and tell me he loves me.",0.8297242380261238,1.9343164716981176,2.6127044025157247,98.11510885341076,79.25157232704403,5.395452346395743,21.03580067731011,5.369823440869387,-0.30328582486695765,545,14,139,2,13,181,89,159,0.095,0.727,0.17800000000000002,0.9343,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,0,7,11,4,0,4,0,15,5,1,0,1,17,30,5,0,5,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,3,2,0,1,0,5,5,0,4,5,1,30,6,25,22,1,18,0,0,0,4,22,10,0,0,6,92,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196512287930875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725676546838946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35878308968452466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347243078956025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162125339156277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896500831592015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919259946255353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17371302954288154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669686811444272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6352027057317587,0.0,0.0,0.17838448371858662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304638180292805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384549433650643,0.1338170035403364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685103295056439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17935766071139805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537870209189593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20519433974140294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113375120259036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330526914688414
mentalhealth,HiThereMyFriendz,2020/02/21,"School work and exams have been making me feel like shit So to give some context I am from the UK and as some may know in the UK you do these big exams at 16 years old called GCSEs and I am currently in the run up to the exams, (it’s GCSE year for me) and everything about these exams has been making me feel pretty shit to put it bluntly.

I am currently on a “holiday” for one week, I put quotations because it really doesn’t feel like one because they have told us to revise 5 hrs a day and have also set lots of homework (bear in mind it is only one week) and honestly it feels like the worst holiday I have ever had. It isn’t even just the fact we are supposed to do the work because most people at least I don’t think are doing 5 hrs a day but I personally have not being doing enough revision and have to be quite honest got barely any done. Then after a couple days of unproductive revision I am already late into that week off (I missed like the first weekend because I went to see my grandparents+skipped Monday which added to it) and then I realise I have lots of homework to do and coursework (I do PE GCSE) so I have now decided to scrap the timetable and start doing my homework which is bad because I need to do revision too but I thought it would be better to do homework.

The whole thing has made me feel so terrible because the work/revision itself isn’t even the worst part but it’s my lack of doing that revision that has made me feel terrible because for some reason I just cannot get myself to work and I will get distracted or maybe I will get through one subject and then just decide I am too tired to do the other 3 hrs of revision I planned for that day. But then after saying I am to tired and giving up on it I feel even worse because I feel as if I am not doing the work I am supposed too and although I am meant to be relaxing I just feel shit and empty inside.

Not only this but I decide to start revision late in the day (when I probably should start earlier) but when I am not revising it isn’t really all that great either because all I end up doing is staying inside and playing video games. Then I eventually try to revise either procrastinate and get nothing done or only get one subject’s revision done then give up on the rest maybe because I am overwhelmed by the amount of hours I need to put in. 

Like I said earlier though the worst part is I am stuck in this state where I am meant to be relaxing and having fun (when I stop revising/give up on it) but I am still feeling shit thinking about how I have not being doing enough work and it is making me feel really sad and everything seems kinda just shit.

I currently feel terrible because of this revision and work issue of procrastination and not having fun, feeling sad about my lack of revision but also I think what’s making me feel even worse I am not exercising/playing sports enough and I am eating like shit and overall I think my mental health is not in a good place right know.

Any advice on how to help the situation would be greatly appreciated.

Side Note: I do have a past history of poor mental health and in the past have struggled with anxiety in particular and although I have seen therapists for that and it has got better I maybe more prone to feelings as I described due to my past mental health disorders.",4.381782738870086,5.320263516467068,5.512400416558192,81.40621322572247,70.27245508982037,8.6829471491799,27.845092423847962,8.964715089967882,2.1210886748242643,2631,89,521,48,46,874,241,668,0.158,0.737,0.105,-0.9935,4,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,2,1,1,11,30,37,6,3,26,0,82,12,6,9,4,114,135,60,0,8,26,0,15,6,0,6,5,2,4,1,31,30,1,1,29,9,1,5,14,19,0,6,18,19,68,18,73,104,25,79,0,4,2,0,14,28,6,12,49,391,99,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0480608838156462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054274466382744885,0.07866296894995525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689201015572291,0.0,0.03762472372363265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041065601470545735,0.32979530545095376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699641739253318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050221159581028206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054419856366292936,0.0,0.15859425493021645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636777428217157,0.0,0.0,0.15099330649655987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05032630475948331,0.0,0.0,0.043561381493105684,0.1524570055955212,0.0,0.12993915862493113,0.044488677692779456,0.0,0.0,0.08840469702943422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3730246838958692,0.10540865222742997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04183488272657827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284799710811972,0.14154193151679614,0.0,0.04125221709639262,0.07867199036095696,0.10844846836733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683711765036806,0.0,0.0,0.032966208430449215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04843517191794832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0513340874051498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054059184758757664,0.0,0.11096072950145347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416945318709026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362695185750607,0.0,0.09307594952967477,0.13131966068351367,0.0,0.1482322640398432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486941480335381,0.0,0.04966062913060326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293687769526018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719224356612648,0.0,0.05160909757972874,0.0,0.16663776308601227,0.112217255728832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065204054110291,0.14085170443055955,0.034097175638586386,0.04294454254458941,0.05138558029474611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0500366108699395,0.053027399935469816,0.0,0.0,0.1483269595696267,0.0,0.05231198455302987,0.0,0.0,0.09452332429036693,0.05056813174881678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042001860713899115,0.04678412586927616,0.039112153602009814,0.0,0.0497756409651887,0.03919234090521268,0.044774193391573854,0.0,0.0,0.30291275611984003,0.0,0.05528355189179928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443556231063617,0.05242234359068132,0.039277464672782265,0.04111904092068818,0.0,0.05141656362432463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710504636843203,0.032674881098558636,0.1260574640573014,0.04832187227463172,0.03904566638801322,0.0,0.11305683614365646,0.0,0.04699629349615145,0.0,0.033391907260505393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05916087837899432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183544779067941,0.0,0.0,0.04559296814539333,0.0,0.05491086363233001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506397580194713,0.0,0.10024299355039266,0.0698761303448308,0.0,0.0,0.06334424887166859
mentalhealth,FatRatYellow402,2020/02/21,"Leaving work Hey guys,

I am bi polar, and have depression and anxiety. Was diagnosed about 5 years ago. Anyways, this past month things have been really bad for me mentally the past month. I’ve always thought about suicide before but would never do it. But this past month I have come up with plans and how to do it. I still don’t think I would ever have the guts to do it. But sometimes I just want to escape my brain.  So obviously I’ve been extremely suicidal lately. I take three meds. Lamictal and klonopin and one for my hyperthyroid. I am married and have two kids. 

Anyways, I just landed a reallllly good job at a bank and just started on Monday. Well I’ve been so bad lately that it’s affecting my relationship with my wife and kids. So my mom and wife are begging me to get admitted and want to take me in tomorrow at noon for inpatient. 

How should I approach tomorrow. I don’t want to have an embarrassing talk to my manager about how I am suicidal, she might look at me differently. Should I call hr and tell them? Idk I realllllllly don’t want to lose this job but my mental health is really important.",2.473300124533001,4.853756365296807,4.510537567455375,80.45442403486928,78.95433789954338,8.365379825653799,25.02303860523039,9.095868883498916,2.2513178082191776,880,33,175,24,22,301,118,219,0.155,0.764,0.08,-0.9732,3,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,1,3,17,7,0,1,5,0,26,5,2,4,3,40,39,21,3,8,7,3,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,3,9,14,0,0,3,0,1,2,4,5,1,3,5,1,26,2,22,29,0,27,0,2,1,1,14,7,0,1,18,121,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825681570228616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09223136692153057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479561347554214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851007808065227,0.0,0.0,0.09432036567560756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373893715054406,0.11318445996858015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548258044412296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547006398341333,0.11250466755928204,0.0,0.11580873887328663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002650476687852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05791159051252785,0.0,0.0,0.09297096987632388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109753319341427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178223456167234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199917993952669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500744775930278,0.1173681469298144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308132519382144,0.12400645885205808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312306898208415,0.0,0.22341003919553531,0.11758832367485357,0.0,0.1298195463936027,0.2654246739029923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548998508819798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511099059682982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174403823931091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14201943966106936,0.0,0.0,0.11900533429044795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962788236633048,0.0,0.07845619137601992,0.0,0.08852042973542243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3637371377308637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16668229151385938,0.08909247838918563,0.09688283513145032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364005137537705,0.07102457466814552,0.0,0.0879980211749252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827880974274663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615154444772605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09966236973359853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069599659572889,0.0,0.0,0.1574812717140345,0.0,0.0,0.07138011806644512
mentalhealth,seriouslyproblematic,2020/02/21,"please can someone message me for like five minutes really sorry sorry to be an annoyance but i have no one to talk to rn, it's nearly 2 in the morning and the only person i know who's up at this time is my sibling and they're doing uni work.

UK",2.15388888888889,3.022568648148148,4.75277777777778,85.03250000000003,75.48148148148148,6.881481481481483,24.61111111111111,7.1686216300943375,1.0572,193,6,41,2,4,69,47,54,0.134,0.8009999999999999,0.065,-0.3905,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,4,1,8,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,29,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16419883030302632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145966287902089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20245755392086925,0.22723171788743105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608786530979932,0.0,0.3279650376930763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914028036011959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531509398461325,0.0,0.0,0.6689079115523348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240143887120878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17421800326802825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175116311495912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,redpanda1703,2020/02/21,"Self harm behaviors starting as a toddler I’ve struggled with self harm my entire life. When I was a young child I would have fits of beating myself and screaming that I wanted to die. It then turned into punching things until my knuckles bled, and then eventually I started cutting. I have a history of child abuse, so that might explain why I’ve been suicidal since I was 6 years old. It’s hard to stop because I’ve been using it to cope my entire life. I really want to stop though. 

Has anyone else here struggled with this??",5.132968099861305,6.164501436893206,5.500027739251041,81.8378640776699,68.6116504854369,7.827461858529817,30.248266296809987,7.957251820313856,2.062995561719834,420,16,78,5,7,134,68,103,0.33299999999999996,0.653,0.013999999999999999,-0.9873,0,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,2,3,0,9,2,0,1,0,13,16,9,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,4,7,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,4,2,11,0,11,10,0,13,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,11,49,18,0,0.0,0.20818553176712268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285928646876315,0.18003385559263005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711011192583067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18235741183319426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678168770182426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574000699641055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24821585171807545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18639867515194725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18437624003340294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256319748142801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666040286543401,0.0,0.0,0.1453476714217762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487343925472616,0.0,0.0,0.2937999118091137,0.0,0.3673768045196282,0.0,0.19219629539655705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673274680270845,0.0,0.17263245317566675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19112010866979734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15175550374798594,0.0,0.0,0.20727454418485944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15854935646786525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12481809201527595,0.0,0.0,0.11315034540814935
mentalhealth,littl3misstrange,2020/02/21,"has anyone ever heard of a panic attack lasting days?  My boyfriend woke up on Monday morning and has been having a series of panic attacks ever since (it's now Thursday night). Basically the only times he gets any relief are either when he's sleeping, or after taking xanax. Could these panic attacks go on indefinitely? What should I do to help him",4.275897435897438,6.796651384615388,5.518076923076925,74.79608974358976,73.61538461538461,5.564102564102565,24.679487179487186,6.42735559955562,1.2146410256410258,280,9,42,2,6,93,55,65,0.249,0.6759999999999999,0.075,-0.924,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,3,3,3,0,8,2,1,0,2,8,13,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,3,1,3,1,7,8,1,15,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,2,11,31,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482392068736767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806398021669258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5762744082534776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13481313885571428,0.0,0.0,0.10889440521931368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054693310599833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821725629114185,0.0,0.09596145527412553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317672449576648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13763544262399074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584544669767461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841817970551822,0.0,0.5943279585564767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13967462368134392,0.0,0.16897213360044716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695433072669646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845790481896337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,new--era,2020/02/21,"How do I trust that decisions I make are what I truly want, and not the depression speaking? I’ve struggled extremely with anxiety for the past couple of years and recently went in for a true diagnosis of other mental health issues, and was told I am very high in depression.

As with depression, I’ve been feeling empty/ numb lately. And that has carried over to my relationship with my boyfriend. He’s sweet and supportive but I feel like I’m not growing with him. He doesn’t push me to be better nor motivates me to be better. Or is it wrong of me to think a partner has to do that? Or is it the depression and numbness that is making me feel like I wouldn’t be better or worse with or without him? I’m not sure what to do but I just don’t want to make a wrong decision, if it really is just my mental health issues that are clouding my judgment. And to clarify, he doesn’t worsen my mental health issues.

Anyone have advice or experience on this? I’m REALLY not looking for everyone to be on my side or 100% positivity and support, I just want straight answers/ truth.",4.972917505030181,5.718686281690147,6.2985010060362185,77.00376760563383,68.81220657276995,9.841582830315225,30.237759892689468,9.957137785484203,2.93188021462106,850,32,163,20,14,288,107,213,0.11699999999999999,0.6509999999999999,0.233,0.9737,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,4,5,21,0,1,6,0,23,5,0,5,3,49,41,20,0,5,17,0,3,2,1,1,5,1,0,1,12,13,0,0,8,0,0,3,10,9,0,0,4,6,20,12,27,32,0,15,0,4,1,0,9,8,0,7,6,114,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10270909944988814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040637591119572,0.0,0.0,0.07349308331749399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788751363799757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629861949718405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621131583713523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043400368973114,0.0,0.10281456971356703,0.0,0.0,0.15943539241802754,0.1501765661243935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3351706800893517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110510519302565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32911241761735943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185649919081049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269969761568877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826319802504161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21047871498688994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31776864729693505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033628576575716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466815067478718,0.0,0.10378023525991356,0.11284531418780555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098803960184987,0.0,0.0,0.2385477882153351,0.09906186780416408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06734816125066294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043400368973114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672407625866173,0.1859840527713772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743501008893844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131915606915357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711275757240613,0.0,0.22983546195607726,0.0,0.06768530081442903
mentalhealth,austinre281,2020/02/21,"I prefer to fail. Throughout my life I've been, like many others, have been putting as little effort as possible into everything. Recently I realized that in the end I feel that I'd rather be a failure and a disappointment subconsciously. It's gotten to the point to which, no matter how hard I try, I'm always extremely disappointed in myself and my capabilities. 

Lately I've been trying to dig myself out of a pretty serious depression through drawing. But no matter how long I work on a drawing I find that it's always missing something. I find that I'm never good enough. And through this I've found that's how I feel towards everything in my life. 

I'm currently in college, and I'm about to end up dropping out. I just can't handle working in classes that I feel in my gut I'm not capable, nor deserving of passing. Sure I get energized sometimes and feel like I can do it. But when the going gets tough, I quit.

I'm tired of it. I don't know how to break this habit or whatever you call it. I've tried everything I can think of, atleast I've convinced myself I have.

If anyone has any advice or if anyone can atleast relate I'd love to hear about it. Thanks for reading friend! :)",3.487854763491004,5.148147983122363,5.008070175438597,81.37421052631579,73.38818565400844,8.027448367754829,28.50743948478793,8.6894789155246,2.262456540084389,940,38,181,18,19,316,126,237,0.14800000000000002,0.72,0.132,-0.4166,1,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,5,9,16,0,0,7,0,13,5,1,4,2,36,34,19,0,4,9,0,5,2,1,0,3,1,0,0,16,8,0,0,11,1,0,3,7,7,0,0,5,6,24,9,30,28,1,27,0,5,0,1,5,14,0,4,10,114,40,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541643203551314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135852524065724,0.0,0.0,0.08727843288935655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17948244777408234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105374157285452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105426407185171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.227349670154196,0.13261383036533494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3460423778037973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595786632907749,0.09168909667957982,0.0,0.0,0.23460848219092675,0.0,0.0,0.14072275172426044,0.0991583830308277,0.0,0.1341090573601472,0.0,0.07294094631127823,0.10764899583681106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497116192414218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14465320102936816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053459625501916,0.0,0.14477780770231646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18130655778314214,0.12540495160674694,0.12863456993352934,0.0,0.11358054672361953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583561924637305,0.0,0.0,0.13012083827119572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09898693173891576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213267198419736,0.14468876127675856,0.0,0.13057215573747372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290213341009646,0.0,0.1365098170167654,0.12837889613659922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672437877283604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880560807057198,0.12693566032655607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209628560401662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816206298155155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223775822639391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751273676895024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26141178865149994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18687216048486427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LilyofManyVallies,2020/02/21,"Tips on dating with mental illness? So I am 24 and I feel like now is the time for mw to start seriously looking at a relationship.

But there are some things that are concerning me. I have schizoaffective disorder and while I am doing well right now (and plan to be in the future- have a decent job/degree/medication regimen) I just dont know what the future holds. 

I want things out of life, but I dont know if I can get them.

Is it even fair for me to get them? Is it impossible? If I were to start dating... when do I disclose the fact that I have an illness? When is fair? The thing is- I know its going to scare most people away and that is going to hurt and Im not sure if I can handle that.

It seems like everyone my age is already together. Is dating. Happy. I feel so behind. 

So anyone reading this. How do you handle mental illness and dating? Any tips?",0.00648305084745715,2.3447660395480234,2.4195833333333354,90.85106991525429,91.99435028248587,5.209887005649718,17.54449152542373,6.816661863887847,0.1653881355932203,667,18,141,10,24,227,101,177,0.133,0.7659999999999999,0.10099999999999999,-0.7784,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,2,1,12,8,0,1,8,0,24,4,0,1,2,28,38,18,0,4,7,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,13,8,0,1,6,1,0,2,3,3,1,0,1,3,20,5,16,36,2,23,0,1,1,0,4,6,0,6,17,108,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16773121074515904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336239672513793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627903915015127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280511354308614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17420042346771603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3562760310178229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039183179466532,0.0,0.0,0.14523855753928575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15370734721174187,0.1085858725073418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15882312654337585,0.0,0.17276549957515874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16180241895367872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16271471141322205,0.0,0.16418161104726628,0.0,0.1508324373611402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25059884829283396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735917072553,0.1485149988394672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276382409742775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16883313506231634,0.0,0.3063521534479113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537479102086003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520369918926975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631866704063309,0.0,0.12980363365362546,0.0,0.0,0.1521743714062,0.0,0.0,0.13837132206414826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21516690356361992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325429892719954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029378858724861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886300080828294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965109610112082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666253179825769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,basic1236,2020/02/21,"I struggle when alone and bored Ok so this is my first ever post to this community and a throwaway account. I’m currently studying for exams and in general am under a lot of pressure to get into a academic university. However after my studies and just in general, If I’m not socialising or I’m bored, I feel awful. I wouldn’t call it depression but it’s what I imagine it to be like. It’s like a short episode I get regularly. I usually go to sleep and wake up feeling better. Then when I have nothing on later in my day after my studies I back in the ‘episode’. It’s like a existential crisis of just crushing boredom in a way. How do I handle this? Any thoughts or comments appreciated.",2.4446488294314364,4.5905315362318895,5.2239130434782615,76.51690635451507,77.84057971014494,8.014269788182832,31.6298773690078,8.841846274778883,3.05503723522854,544,29,101,13,13,195,86,138,0.166,0.685,0.14800000000000002,0.09,2,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,8,10,0,2,7,2,6,2,2,1,1,23,15,14,0,2,7,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,4,0,1,1,2,5,0,1,1,2,13,5,18,12,1,25,0,1,0,0,2,10,0,4,15,74,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416803509546741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15868608440213985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17943183943804147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063792192953588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382765639572145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15049152366606036,0.0,0.20098411754633136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211078544264438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359776654341017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19848749397271498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24383161441867435,0.0,0.1326182514917149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34200924689508183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19838592845185332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239057348770671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234849122762193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23351864396910546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24394821252832466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18525393085248654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570021911575918,0.0,0.0,0.1852224647356177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,joolzian,2020/02/21,"Asking for direction So this is my first ever post and I just wanted some feedback.

I’ve just been diagnosed with PSTD from years of emotional abuse and I still question if things were actually bad or if I’m just “playing the victim” as I get told.  

I have been raped, drugged, and molested. I’ve been given hallucinagens as a child, and left in the middle of nowhere to find my way home.  My ex partner used to say he wouldn’t touch me because I was fat (80kg while he was 115kg)
I’ve had a best friend kill himself and had death threats from my father for being distant.

There is more that I could tell but my “friends” tell me I’m just being dramatic or playing the victim if I try to say anything. 

I just don’t know who to listen to anymore so any feedback is welcome. Am I being over sensitive?",3.47927402862986,4.638577699386506,4.620383435582824,86.13012525562374,72.61963190184049,7.396523517382414,28.307259713701434,7.793537801064563,1.6274830265848674,627,24,131,8,12,206,103,163,0.127,0.7659999999999999,0.107,-0.3071,0,0,1,0,1,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,10,13,6,0,5,0,19,4,1,1,1,26,29,16,2,6,11,2,1,0,3,1,3,3,1,2,4,6,1,0,3,2,0,0,2,7,0,1,10,4,17,6,16,14,3,11,0,0,0,1,19,4,0,7,5,87,21,2,0.0,0.20656395087395246,0.17013032806916248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855692535517805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728980644542773,0.0,0.0,0.1434666590900444,0.0,0.16298401799773218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556630715312566,0.10627581902617553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18295868361563689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391960067600491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769510525318934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021786192339097,0.0,0.0,0.196108615952488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577001745976736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15934326150231126,0.14829319845856756,0.0,0.0,0.26938872814614,0.0,0.0910852599923296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748768616014257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19288096774328795,0.0,0.09581250013694624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18942051586032416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669691716357138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19530028278344327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772837392255893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922785207115787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047610382876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582350210056325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16658898565082456,0.0,0.11836516341293025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505734627904692,0.0,0.0,0.1028300295390262,0.1383826818116801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226900443977357
mentalhealth,SubstantialScientist,2020/02/21,"My friend was ""escorted"" to the hospital 2 days ago He sent me a text 2 mornings ago saying he was currently being ""escorted' to the hospital and then said he wouldn't be able to explain what happened, but there was another message at 12:30 (I had just gone to bed) when he asked me to talk to him urgently.. I saw the message when I woke up and texted him and he said that. He has since been able to not communicate with me, so I am asking here if anyone has an idea as to what is going on. I care deeply about him and we talk, he is 2 years younger than me and still in high school so I try to give him advice and he trusts me. (Without giving too much info he comes from an abusive household) 

Does anyone know why he wouldn't be able to respond? I am concerned.",4.0877848101265855,4.320203221518991,5.0606075949367115,86.92205063291142,70.58227848101266,8.345316455696205,27.8253164556962,8.238735603445708,1.5949878481012658,591,19,131,8,10,194,97,158,0.036000000000000004,0.879,0.085,0.7814,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,0,0,10,3,0,0,6,0,16,0,0,0,0,20,32,14,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,3,9,0,0,4,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,11,4,18,3,20,16,1,18,0,0,1,0,30,5,0,1,9,83,21,1,0.45005589682372105,0.17774754801708248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659647120831082,0.2659649318101897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730761630540094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097930315866425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804943402999368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15295399382165434,0.0,0.0,0.12922776814703574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674960708530357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128231606120228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590402315802822,0.0,0.0,0.287823083847322,0.08525904590237765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266098107626406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15850292159254448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16935277550731362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244631697193247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102809560868741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285404146428476,0.11930083769174166,0.0,0.15182686497440126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409696286729792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980507352144187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24115858803502044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185280383278457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536848172222482,0.0,0.0,0.14461260808531212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660708063076204
mentalhealth,ihavenoskills5,2020/02/21,"Rough day I felt super sad when I woke up, and then I cleaned my living room, kitchen, bedroom, and bathroom because I was so anxious and now I’m laying on my bed under my weighted blanket in the dark listening to James Taylor, Frank Sinatra, and Andy Williams and watching my pet fish Edmund swim around. I feel really sad and numb at the same time which doesn’t make sense to me",9.9728,6.613506813333338,8.792000000000002,76.55600000000003,60.86666666666667,11.066666666666668,41.0,7.793537801064563,3.3238000000000003,301,12,59,2,3,93,59,75,0.146,0.804,0.05,-0.7636,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,1,0,11,8,9,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,1,7,2,0,2,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,6,10,1,8,5,1,13,0,2,1,0,1,7,0,0,5,34,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4127232167064481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3252245458040205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22270409942256592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356100838760257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847237511833909,0.0,0.3507777492019783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3225964470970095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24386315476739684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340421933326389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21302908231082687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44487815858393337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashyyst,2020/02/21,"How did you make yourself seek help? I know I need help and I need  to make an appointment but my anxiety is killing me and I can't do it. I'm a psychology student and it makes me so angry that I'm not capable of doing this and helping myself..but I think I could help others(yeah, sure). I feel like such a loser and guess I should choose different profession. I suffer  from panic attacks, anxiety and depression. I can't even leave my house without feeling stressed. I jump on every sound I hear. How can I get over this feeling and finally seek help? Did anyone have similar problem?",1.9149899665551828,4.476209234782612,3.661739130434782,84.56571906354516,82.73913043478261,7.3645484949832785,27.10702341137124,8.384062270229773,2.3211204013377924,462,21,88,11,13,154,76,115,0.34,0.516,0.14400000000000002,-0.9862,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,1,5,10,2,2,3,0,11,0,0,5,1,28,26,11,1,5,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,5,7,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,2,5,18,2,6,22,0,4,0,3,0,0,7,2,0,1,2,57,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236083030083602,0.0,0.0,0.10789237546872656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755421501522208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319853835896505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290110810968145,0.0,0.0,0.16121398774508558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191579916977313,0.0,0.1300070893549893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340609815954603,0.11023422700133356,0.0,0.16903159812346444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061704612292116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699823558154113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17391090518063962,0.0,0.5171308654513499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17804515964978815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17071361353202213,0.0,0.08480099571920906,0.0,0.0,0.16338479448869178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538474258732737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3089957247736678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288277146912111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810415424429084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764731002436546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675377837398795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454289268227789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887125118147294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14874276510569964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LilTiddyEnergy,2020/02/21,"I feel like I have ADHD but no treatment available? 
TLDR; I’m 90 percent sure I have adhd but parents assume I just want drugs even though my stress levels and academics are severely impacted by it and I don’t know what to do. :(



So uh I’m 14F, and I’m currently a freshman in high school. My whole life I’ve been very scatter brained, I would always daydream EXCESSIVELY and school was a constant struggle. I know I’m not stupid, I score high on tests and am in all honors classes but I always feel like I’m behind on work wither form forgetting it exists or losing it. I’ve always assumed this was just my personality. I’m super jittery, and I often will black out and stare at random places for long periods of time, just thinking without realizing. I always Th ought this was normal behavior. Throughout the day I’ll have cycles of either being incredibly annoying, talkative, and energetic then immediately afterward being silent, moody and reserved; once again I assumed it was just the way I am. I constantly forget things, and if I remember to write them down I end up forgetting to check my planner or calendar so I end up forgetting them anyways. It gets to the point where every single day I am forgetting something that I absolutely need, not just sometimes, EverY dAmN dAy. Until one day I was on tik tok and there was one about having adhd where a girl lists all of the symptoms she gets with adhd and I just thought to myself “wait a minute I legit have all of theSe 0 . o” I then proceeded to do some research on adhd in girls and I check out with literally every one, not one single trait do I miss. I then present this theory of having adhd to my parents.

My dad immediately asks me in a sarcastic way “what, you want drugs?”. He’s always really paranoid about my behavior which is the norm even though I’ve done absolutely no drugs or alcohol ever :( Anyways I explain that no, I don’t want drugs I’m just wondering if this is the reason why I’m so scatterbrained and have issues in school. My mother says I probably do have adhd but that even if we went to a doctor about it, they’d just give me medications that would “turn me into a lifeless zombie” she claims that this hypothesized adhd is what makes me myself and that along with all the bad aspects (scatterbrained, etc), it also is what makes me so ambitious and energetic. My mom doesn’t even want to take me to the doctor beach’s all they’ll do is give me meds and she doesn’t want me to take any. 

I’ve been really stressed lately which only increases my messiness and forgetfulness. I don’t know what to do with this newfound idea of adhd and I have no clue how to help myself or even if I can. My dad just says to write stuff down more and pack at night instead of the morning but I swear I’ve tried it all already. I’ll end up forgetting to pack something then assume everything’s packed up in the morning and head on my way to school oblivious. Writing things down doesn’t help as stated before and I just don’t know what else to do, since I’ve tried everything already. I feel like I can’t talk to my parents about it anymore because they’ll just further assume I just want the Adderall and a nice little label to use as an excuse. I just want to fix myself. What can I do to help myself without any pills or doctors? What can I do to help my parents understand my struggles and that I’m seriously affected by this? Anything helps. 

Sorry for the rant, any suggestions? <3",3.4576750799857834,5.4337304683357885,4.790122644863137,81.57105670103094,74.21354933726067,7.6282667208369315,26.434437052460517,8.433251757073789,1.9324372860697785,2744,100,516,50,58,910,281,679,0.109,0.79,0.10099999999999999,-0.7165,5,0,7,0,0,0,59.0,1,1,5,6,39,19,3,4,21,0,56,14,2,6,8,127,99,53,0,16,33,8,3,3,0,6,12,2,0,3,37,33,1,1,21,1,2,2,17,12,1,4,11,7,78,7,71,79,16,63,0,2,2,0,39,32,1,19,28,362,115,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5419592930119012,0.0,0.0,0.053548097396518855,0.0,0.0,0.11058647854572907,0.04006976626348377,0.2084611136441993,0.0,0.0,0.10222143586544316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04969170816445055,0.0,0.0,0.0412329853277015,0.0,0.04684236508590078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041836433950032816,0.03054416485606892,0.0,0.04263653272057345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055934889616236286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829361472620236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12925695148532776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385690459312795,0.0,0.05127585511904464,0.0,0.0,0.2324283033653005,0.0,0.04185715042591926,0.0,0.13313718496846935,0.0,0.0558814574684972,0.16547276895584592,0.04532376390866318,0.12664944925932856,0.0,0.09006412022961262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600532801515063,0.10738725256070747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0523566550257003,0.09613252060137292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051423232328227285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679250458041782,0.1058795227380429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056563597897493614,0.0,0.052297667152182134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014783329909572,0.0,0.056521773267641434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03539136388922998,0.07343781157327216,0.05021939557969407,0.0,0.04434225114616416,0.0,0.05605581999747861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668923151468641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05565649286567227,0.050476543946378544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05868356529296492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03715297909867462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04702110569729742,0.04909326129572168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053361276245851866,0.13581254420792047,0.038107886237589414,0.0,0.0,0.22254722320615347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04375064417282997,0.05235012660236301,0.0,0.04736638480059649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054022764442728514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641983991759761,0.05151733392735855,0.0,0.0,0.05676035331920894,0.0,0.0,0.0796926367674252,0.0,0.20283986996311645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05660554073182656,0.0,0.041448217703540964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714812464102475,0.04955613520069315,0.05608958739089361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147925537324394,0.10476338302506452,0.057359405386375927,0.0,0.0,0.04722433107266364,0.05207934025633292,0.0753469828617164,0.04027332106686117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665764267880262,0.0321059145616347,0.09845782091902654,0.0397785831542923,0.029217223329565962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803739736147545,0.05450096168849488,0.0,0.05216213412798831,0.0,0.04327551377692503,0.0,0.041342714204686284,0.2068768024770156,0.11931547981125898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04644878273045175,0.04521288975154392,0.055941582181401925,0.0,0.09660083090037312,0.05433784154392651,0.03647777947666354,0.0,0.0,0.07118775829819955,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lauryn23,2020/02/21,"Finding it really hard to accept rejection lately So I’ve been in a relationship for 6 years with my boyfriend and we get along really well, we don’t live together but we see each other usually 3 times a week with college and work etc. Bipolar, addiction and other personality disorders are pretty common in my family (only on my dads side) when I was 15/16 I was diagnosed with depression by my local gp (not taking and never have taken any meds). I used to see a counsellor and she was great but I also felt I couldn’t fully open up to her and I felt like I would be judged. It’s been years since I’ve spoken to a professional about my mental health but it’s been plummeting lately. I find I’m taking things really personally and I’m in a bit of a rut at the moment, I’ve been getting stressed out and overwhelmed and just feeling really low for the last while (few months).

A new thing for me is I’m finding rejection particularly hard. For example I asked my boyfriend to come over tonight to which he said no as he was too tired after college. I do understand why he wouldn’t come over as he was tired but my brain won’t accept that he won’t come over and I’m taking it super personally. I’m quite clingy and I’d see my boyfriend every day if I could and this is obviously an unhealthy obsession on my end but it’s really causing a ton of negativity in the relationship and it’s causing me to get upset and freak out. I’m alone tonight in the house and my brain is on overdrive and I’m not in the best place at the moment. My boyfriend knows all of this as I talk to himself and my friends to help me mentally as I ament seeing anyone(professional)  at the moment. 

I can’t describe the feeling and I understand some of it is self pity as I didn’t want to be alone tonight. My brain just won’t accept no for an answer when he says he can’t see me. We’ve spoken about it before and it does cause fights, it’s a touchy subject in our relationship.

Does anyone else find rejection really hard. Not even on a big scale just something small like not seeing your friends or S/O. If yes how have you learned to accept it or cope with it and not take it personally?",3.016083459024636,4.643634773755657,4.655799396681751,83.55088360985422,74.56561085972852,8.07853192559075,24.947461035696332,8.761943790366164,1.7195865258924088,1718,56,356,35,36,579,201,442,0.16,0.7190000000000001,0.121,-0.9615,0,2,1,0,1,0,31.0,4,2,0,4,13,24,1,4,20,1,30,9,3,5,3,83,65,40,0,7,17,1,7,2,2,5,6,2,0,5,21,35,0,0,17,0,0,3,18,12,1,0,14,15,42,12,54,42,8,54,0,7,6,0,33,27,0,5,26,224,63,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731225432933482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469015368598416,0.0,0.056713954643030126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04822739950695617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04958826268260511,0.07266496802550908,0.0,0.0,0.06629975706334611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060346905119192426,0.0,0.07442518858821551,0.0,0.07742525654331964,0.0,0.0,0.2375074093368806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21856026128828454,0.0,0.18327149756016986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05662310664415913,0.0,0.0,0.0457369331507418,0.0,0.061082491057604375,0.07198136319802331,0.0,0.0,0.0812793983405697,0.0,0.1241235121145593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059243782834476726,0.0,0.06281324610972831,0.0,0.07909350964053324,0.04684137687007575,0.0,0.0597523751750631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668561875443527,0.0,0.0717176253260415,0.0,0.13618685755793364,0.0,0.25927498062862736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10958379509297277,0.0,0.11115686096830424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818852502253973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19058867033933852,0.0,0.0,0.07538365506667978,0.0,0.0,0.04753555769975138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183108498375029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03897526616873405,0.057808507478304585,0.15999959991610635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929495066617572,0.0,0.06262283809255957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877509919119338,0.0,0.14293948439912246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056606925053015726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05469715879285289,0.06849407971425313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0539371484577383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24769518573233634,0.07409533377760137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721501900385699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543116052776741,0.0,0.0,0.27259543330599645,0.0,0.0,0.2284216213220437,0.0,0.0,0.067460275857423,0.05639769093350179,0.0,0.0,0.3390799011209207,0.0,0.07398405686669345,0.0,0.0,0.05866498754736399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054596964865168976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123755505497103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21328925856015352,0.05700206208568916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423095768322697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041353480023125534,0.16302207665756988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476585058952215,0.0,0.06125130626816305,0.07810733621550725,0.0,0.04182990492570262,0.0,0.056887000167984814,0.0,0.06376476095260436,0.0,0.06399342990393689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0516299275896521,0.0,0.0,0.05037887254838288,0.0,0.0,0.09133911179198301
mentalhealth,SageLukahn,2020/02/21,"My fiance has symptoms of psychotic episodes, but refuses help Without going into a huge backstory, I'll just say that sometimes when she takes certain meds (and she's on a lot of them, because she has terminal lupus), she has about 9 of the 10 symptoms in this list: [https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-superhuman-mind/201610/10-subtle-signs-psychosis](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/the-superhuman-mind/201610/10-subtle-signs-psychosis) I don't know which med it is, but I suspect it's Oxy.

She gets paranoid, delusional, irritable, irrational, angry, emotionally abusive. Me and her teenage kids attempted to stage an intervention last night to help her, but she refuses to accept that there is anything wrong; so even though we tell her that something is wrong medically and that's not really her fault and it isn't her, she hears that and assumes we're wrong about the medical part so we are blaming her for it all.

My therapist called the police on her last night, when a pistol came up missing in the house. Now, it didn't have the magazine, and cannot be fire without it, but there's ***no*** situation where a missing pistol does not escalate everything. She claims she was scared I was going to do something to her or her daughters.

What's telling is the first thing she said when she found out the cops were coming was ""you just lost me pain management"". That means that she would choose drugs over her own sanity, and her own family.

She usually breaks up with me during these episodes, but clearly doesn't mean it, because she always comes back. However, at this point, I have to put my foot down and tell her that we aren't going to go back without doctors and therapists involved. I can no longer be as complacent as I have been, it's not good for me, or for the children, or for her.

I have a mental illness myself, I go to therapy for it. She can too.

We all know this isn't who she really is, but it's still hurts like hell when she says the things she does.

How do we get her help?",6.741004928219413,8.605795417827302,5.999456824512539,76.642476430255,65.57381615598885,8.754274694664668,28.84947503749732,9.162432508145574,2.3152617527319475,1621,54,289,29,26,493,182,359,0.198,0.73,0.07200000000000001,-0.995,1,0,3,2,0,0,87.0,5,1,1,3,21,15,1,1,15,0,32,9,1,1,4,55,53,28,0,1,17,1,1,1,0,1,8,4,0,2,27,20,0,2,9,0,0,9,15,11,0,1,10,5,55,4,35,40,6,39,1,4,0,0,57,14,1,5,15,213,82,2,0.0,0.10308055962765997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239081911900336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159343846950653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379498182129607,0.0,0.10606856475930714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883654273104849,0.09950461633324743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988528177896135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904800161451124,0.15226825640940492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089216984475764,0.0,0.0,0.09786308692615828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746256017344556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781898278613974,0.0,0.08201568690840055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400200190503015,0.0,0.09539081140871768,0.0,0.0,0.0909076296625405,0.0,0.2472200112738773,0.07297132080197065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980551193747082,0.0,0.1749424351216241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038611072385166,0.09313510599956944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562565095850974,0.14183292898169594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04250371720941926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497057999114003,0.07396413527818199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18953661631139687,0.193274373210617,0.17528633032304589,0.08767535534051621,0.0,0.17569003338896086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632868738827882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257394174400134,0.0,0.0,0.09421232629801968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224295012338632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745884796967396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114686240813666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275675097097411,0.13837149654668085,0.08710199642208022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779144211188708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13395342274221206,0.08604504592816363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947816812435756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808522479049959,0.06541303689875176,0.0,0.22812503038268936,0.0,0.09949187554933744,0.20202699157843115,0.11559762837656898,0.0,0.0854768808004831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20930014137337008,0.0,0.09581800978481507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515941638061328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061802175527662165,0.2853619350341209,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hiroc2,2020/02/21,I don’t even know what’s going on I think I have OCD and like severe anxiety and I don’t even know what’s going on anymore,-0.6801149425287356,1.0082842068965512,2.421379310344829,94.91988505747128,86.24137931034483,5.2459770114942526,16.563218390804597,6.42735559955562,-0.4032160919540231,98,2,24,1,3,35,17,29,0.17300000000000001,0.726,0.10099999999999999,-0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749842550731318,0.0,0.35648557686658044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4748370114524307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4085763355137516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3950972440339962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756129381846312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4060850308234324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303260623574509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BroccoliExe,2020/02/22,"I am really getting sick of being insecure. Hi!
I'm a young teenage male from Canada and I am insecure with about every aspect of my body and personality. I have been for the longest time and it's only getting worse. It got to a point where I don't wear short sleeves anymore because I'm insecure about the way my arms look, same with my legs, I dont talk to anyone irl anymore who isnt in my family because I'll think of some way to mess  it up and for a while I guess I kind of accepted the way things were but now I'm realizing that it can't work out if I continue having this mindset and its worrying my parents and family and idk what to do about it so here I am asking reddit for advices.",3.4097297297297327,3.971395648648653,5.49010810810811,82.06164864864867,72.24324324324324,8.892972972972975,28.313513513513517,9.120678840339163,2.1832762162162163,548,20,118,11,10,192,91,148,0.12300000000000001,0.866,0.01,-0.9077,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,3,6,0,13,5,4,0,0,18,23,11,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,11,10,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,1,14,2,20,19,2,14,0,0,1,0,7,6,0,3,5,80,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692595941236094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34355715114911634,0.12111302231094764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16192872107294412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111753982666904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923981569379897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20300177362610286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14593757385753506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32657546345234073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809909933544498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853250398463407,0.0,0.1908112298288091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18037239916429265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14545345206788854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13173462249248075,0.0,0.0,0.19233010099950248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512409940025891,0.0,0.0,0.16374019754434085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109632770936362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392202840688713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507356240042275,0.11098648999274252,0.0,0.0,0.10100061340590233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4124600244802159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609952907811053,0.17590398047984754,0.17651660825837154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oliviann412,2020/02/22,"How'd you know something was wrong? Hey, so I'm new to this thread and just kind of wanted to ask a question. If you're willing to share, how did you realize something was wrong or that you needed help? What led you to realize that what you were thinking or feeling wasn't normal? 
I'm in this spot where I feel like I can't control anything or control my emotions, yet almost as though I feel nothing at all. I can never seem to focus for long periods of time or focus on one task. I just feel so distracted and incapable of doing anything productive, which is kind of being reflected in my school work. 
I have never been diagnosed with any sort of mental illness, nor has there ever been any thought that I might have one. But being in college has kind of made it seem like something might be wrong and I'm not sure if anyone else has dealt with a similar situation. 
Sorry if this seems like it is all over the place; I just can't seem to focus my questions any more than they currently are.",6.21877112836912,5.7876523115577925,6.5267610781178655,80.49081772498862,66.08542713567839,9.447418912745547,32.16126084970306,8.841846274778883,2.48090552763819,786,28,156,11,11,254,115,199,0.109,0.823,0.068,-0.8472,1,0,3,0,0,0,16.0,0,5,1,3,11,12,0,1,3,0,25,2,0,5,6,51,43,17,0,6,12,0,4,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,11,5,0,2,16,0,0,1,7,4,0,2,9,4,17,8,23,28,3,18,0,0,0,0,12,8,0,17,12,110,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031275182160578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21010593717459672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201154330182545,0.10552328733489336,0.16950055438835446,0.0,0.09627979623376548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23101940315925296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453056373513923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603318612421165,0.11584754024074945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315846340531694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20829513285134574,0.07357458556791828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903062713816044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217381892970772,0.05659946357415958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15094407639669968,0.0,0.0,0.09114106209347136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744965334834632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378759320760353,0.21850780112612966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636423247498267,0.15886125489449887,0.09946636805632296,0.0,0.0,0.10090628825711853,0.09881968004599356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957455028528898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760044914137816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307400647227673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422926613717537,0.0,0.3750253118670226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11576272914634173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378553806997264,0.0,0.11528653676918348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706488911509878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599049612939563,0.10118510154558473,0.08176089899687672,0.06005308023043718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060744939364958374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497642718579353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3378033463933896,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ronnieveroni,2020/02/22,"When i make a mistake a feel ashamed, like i am not capable of anything, not good enough It's incredibly difficult for me to keep on going after i screw up. most of the time its unintentional and thats when it feels like there is sth wrong with me, how could i have done that. The worst part is the rummination over my actions,it doesnt stop until i have sth new to worry about.
 I know you cant really help me,because the problem lies within me..its the way i think, the way i have programmed myself to think i have to be perfect in order to be enough.",5.8875072463768126,4.7944290695652185,6.763260869565219,80.711268115942,67.0,9.753623188405797,30.471014492753625,8.841846274778883,2.104101449275364,433,13,95,6,6,145,76,115,0.261,0.654,0.085,-0.9626,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,1,5,11,1,1,8,0,13,1,0,2,1,18,21,5,0,3,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,5,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,1,2,14,4,17,17,5,16,0,0,0,1,2,5,1,1,9,69,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702445576875053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611208707127505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16517679266412907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21170999881315106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4275245469165181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092094205160539,0.14779506559433805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757463357133666,0.17352107259236904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386672583630753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183884390161642,0.0,0.0,0.11369580089343816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20214217087713696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809396184103448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998059286075672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22403080732250014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979561562999364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253258265315626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17296088760163306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651206154615352,0.0,0.0,0.12063335271669727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32842332296668203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21009661432666527,0.0,0.0,0.2261907303671251,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheTaterthotty,2020/02/22,"How do you move past a traumatic event? Hi everyone, completely new here as I just need help after today. I was coordinating for a boat trip today when a crazy wave hit us head on. I was in the captains deck but the impact busted all the windows open and completely doused all of us. Inside cabin had water, there wasn’t a dry spot on me. Also ended up getting a cut on my
hand from some of the glass. We had to call EMS for some people and I’m newer to the job so have never had any kind of emergency happen to me. I handled it the best I could but feel like I could have done more. People were hurt but not life threatening. I was cold hours afterward, my muscles are stiff and my heart is still beating too fast to be relaxed even though I’ve been home for hours now. Time is moving incredibly quickly and I don’t know how to process everything in my head. I was partly responsible for the safety of our guests and I feel like we failed them. I plan on speaking to my supervisor about what help is provided onsite but wondering if there is anything else I could be doing in the meantime to help settle my nerves. I’m sincerely hoping this doesn’t prevent me from ever going out to sea again.",3.694029506685105,4.996409497925313,4.908015214384509,83.72162632549565,72.27800829875518,7.845182111572154,25.00714615029968,8.344100000000001,1.4968587367450437,943,28,190,15,18,312,151,241,0.095,0.725,0.18,0.9754,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,5,1,1,4,18,10,1,0,13,0,27,7,4,2,4,35,39,17,0,6,7,0,3,2,1,0,2,1,2,0,3,9,1,2,4,1,0,4,5,3,0,0,11,5,28,7,30,22,7,34,0,2,0,0,15,10,0,5,22,137,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725623913823997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270302307406446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000795725895962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762844673420512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241834924669461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550240400847463,0.0,0.0,0.2913013438330833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124455351066527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159452901970972,0.0,0.10771564288098226,0.0,0.0,0.08032619448096225,0.11000859831226856,0.0,0.11620926135601235,0.10930058285377238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298536688259985,0.17376493200661364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353931949808096,0.0,0.06911715261286945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754459163570612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496261219837985,0.0,0.0,0.14411549795778894,0.24454984296099255,0.0,0.1219907236697836,0.12079208909847945,0.2395344455280149,0.0,0.13019240032022858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068507448184962,0.0,0.0,0.1266443073959029,0.06683695099101677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590094903988,0.11883082982805827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585170373510223,0.0,0.09017669322447842,0.09379772560779702,0.11745745184182353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316982331082383,0.11609619479141198,0.16862638733885799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712266261880158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11948706305603392,0.0,0.07091524418711644,0.0,0.2305554194777675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925780509970989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188732064723666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spoinkulous,2020/02/22,Sudden onset panic attacks I've had anxiety for about 30 years. Now suddenly I am getting panic attacks almost every day. Is that concerning or odd? Thanks.,3.265000000000001,6.4317712142857175,5.261428571428574,69.80857142857147,86.85714285714286,7.085714285714286,28.42857142857143,8.07648339933343,3.279328571428572,126,6,16,3,4,43,25,28,0.428,0.496,0.076,-0.91,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591339999748976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979684445156372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5888065126961346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16689375947725918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21803601255455396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520354442035448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6072526693247271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382528077611327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664790033074678
mentalhealth,E963,2020/02/22,"Research project on cyberbullying on social media platforms and its impacts and effects Hi everyone, 

My name is Emily and I am a student of Kingston University in United Kingdom, currently in my 2nd year studying criminology. I am currently conducting a research project on cyberbullying and social media and was wondering if any of you would like to help me by completing the survey. It should only take between 5-10 min. You have to be 18 years of age or older. The survey is for people who has been/are affected by cyberbullying.   
My aim for this project is to research the link between cyberbullying on social media platforms and the impacts and effects it has on people. I am very passionate about bullying and hoping to continue this study in my 3rd year for my dissertation. But also to shed a bigger light on this issue in our society.   
You are more than welcome to share your story with me, either here or email me on: [K1718738@kingston.ac.uk](mailto:K1718738@kingston.ac.uk)

Here is the link to the survey:    

  [https://surveyhero.com/c/8745c243](https://surveyhero.com/c/8745c243) 

Thank you for the help!",9.029773013871376,11.335970699453554,8.019125683060112,62.642005044136226,60.58469945355192,10.002353930222784,35.38839848675915,10.214889679676881,4.0881697351828485,910,39,127,20,13,281,102,183,0.03,0.84,0.13,0.9565,2,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,1,5,0,2,4,6,0,0,10,0,15,1,0,3,0,24,19,13,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,17,6,32,15,2,23,0,0,0,1,17,14,0,5,10,98,24,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15509673934854545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188839427383847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20334632216456425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853215554922044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25999280243287143,0.0,0.0,0.19262989525683788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024268770998758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475111521748712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475029542236606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689123399806493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5931036591235951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582155639191555,0.0,0.0,0.17855733925100614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600238974892426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103237136768917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777206885837195,0.0,0.0,0.3746802308998343
mentalhealth,thebrowndude8279,2020/02/22,"Scream Inside my head Hey, I have bipolar disorder, sometimes I feel like someone raging inside my head (like a ghost rider transition) and sometimes I feel like it's trying to come out. I'm already on 5 different meds. Should I be worried?",4.186333333333334,6.5259164666666685,5.055277777777778,78.85625000000002,73.22222222222223,7.166666666666668,31.25,8.07648339933343,2.637333333333334,191,9,31,3,4,62,34,45,0.275,0.621,0.10400000000000001,-0.8074,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,0,3,3,2,0,0,6,7,1,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,6,3,3,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,15,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399709136966831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18732128285825114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271978975749971,0.2492263342056834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199071501864752,0.3107048583787845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4463504113457673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31871778493851993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24154742282720265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18425192091154796,0.0,0.4301441261092031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476400788332012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208397098296948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bxiqocb92,2020/02/22,"The ""everything at once"" feeling. I've been feeling all types of emotions today, mostly negative ones and I'm not sure how to cope with them. I feel anxious, sad, lonely, scared,  annoyed, abandoned. I usually just ignore these feelings when they come once in a blue but today it's weighing on me heavy and I want to break down. Anyone else feel like this at times and, if so, how do you cope with it? Asking for a friend here.",2.5407530120481923,4.795972397590365,3.2417921686747,90.2995557228916,78.03614457831327,5.595783132530121,23.62801204819277,6.6274283507984215,0.7171698795180723,331,11,65,3,8,104,66,83,0.187,0.684,0.129,-0.2803,0,2,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,2,0,6,9,1,1,3,0,2,1,0,2,2,23,11,9,0,2,4,0,5,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,2,5,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,1,6,7,3,11,10,2,12,0,3,1,0,5,5,0,2,6,43,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21613413500443876,0.0,0.13377353069531167,0.19602722105535975,0.0,0.0,0.17885588457440385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648029458191478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598210861356577,0.215206254022602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17194368668770918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4836789712897873,0.13667714410191306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478113003313671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346798726650588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4074934409254937,0.12964157918831964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915420303676887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803143263997584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155867800087486,0.0,0.3626929315086484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107090180922884,0.0,0.11284392248981442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DtC7L,2020/02/22,"Social Media and Mental Health... I stopped using social media for about 3 weeks before occasionally (1-2x/week) downloading Facebook or IG to follow pages I thought were important for later before deleting them again.

This has gotten me to think about whether I really stay true to myself or change what I say and post based on what I THINK others might think.. I have definitely spent longer than I want to editing captions because I got caught up in wondering “what if this sounds dumb?” or something along those lines.

I want to be able to post things and express myself without caring as much about validation. I will probably continue to only log on 1-2x/week since I finally stopped the habit of mindlessly logging on to scroll or obsessively check notifications. I’ve managed to log on just to check pages to research or learn things, and to check on how long distance friends or friends I haven’t seen in a while are doing. 

I have noticed that I still occasionally check previous posts of mine to see if certain people have “liked” them. And I’ll notice the anxiety (and sometimes either excitement or disappointment) that comes with that. I will work on not putting as much value into getting acknowledged by those people by remembering that opinions don’t always hold a lot of value anyway and not everyone is supposed to agree either.

What are some ways you maintain emotional well-being when using social media?",9.555958533653849,9.087141933593752,8.72984375,67.54808894230771,59.3515625,11.314423076923076,38.051682692307686,10.560738912317856,4.111342908653846,1149,47,184,22,13,361,156,256,0.05,0.818,0.132,0.9578,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,2,1,9,10,1,1,4,0,15,1,0,3,2,49,34,22,0,4,16,0,0,1,2,3,1,2,0,0,15,11,0,3,8,0,5,4,5,3,0,0,7,4,22,7,40,23,8,30,0,1,2,0,10,10,1,14,12,128,37,5,0.1118841831860839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309660326586428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855910938968779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820355959879347,0.0,0.1904103984637673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140733814481362,0.0,0.11835863049760925,0.09637831691218712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585464688498996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691013172563872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256365382468612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288288477770408,0.0,0.058454867865364225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948400210855836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892765478653078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0546609604163334,0.0,0.0,0.09901398132976512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511993152855522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127529412108424,0.11869143744957755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16449549640177002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547617682414593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509296300740235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551328101775528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214623595423744,0.0,0.12063007293614456,0.0,0.0,0.11247450672076843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167587270725183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674296903181,0.0,0.0,0.08897479317186381,0.0,0.0,0.08915720830527947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255175251077573,0.0,0.0,0.34215550455235183,0.0,0.08613391038327572,0.11065631804219324,0.0,0.0,0.11925365261210198,0.08935085321909789,0.1870803739713089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866175957695696,0.2150726007009949,0.0,0.0888235438652131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19326402256936895,0.0,0.0,0.13198438012476366,0.08880845683305617,0.26924022900594785,0.0,0.10059731743451787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785235999499716,0.12133362400558892,0.08145301789365952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chreeztina,2020/02/22,"Confused in life Hello, 19/F here. I have no official diagnosis and probably wont for a while as I have no insurance or money to go see a doctor or therapist. I came here to see if anyone can help me better understand my mental state.

The things I experience is unfounded happiness, like I'm super duper happy out of no where for no reason and feel like I'm floating. While in that emotional state I also tend to find something new to obsess over and spend money I dont have on stuff related to said obsession. Then after buying 5+ items I no longer feel happy from it and I feel nothing. I also rage easily and do stuff that will/can harm myself and others. When I get into rage or depressive mode I sometimes black out and cant remember what I did in those moments. I easily cut people off with no warning or telltale signs and have no remorse when I say terrible things to them.

I have an inkling it may be bipolar 2 but I dont know if I'm just trying to fit that mold because itll give me an excuse to be the way I am.",4.022072434607647,4.531674107981225,5.966106639839038,79.38686619718312,70.83098591549296,9.278202548625083,27.89034205231389,9.424239791934726,2.354884909456741,807,27,163,17,14,282,130,213,0.14400000000000002,0.727,0.128,0.3995,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,2,8,16,3,3,6,0,18,3,0,1,0,32,34,23,0,2,8,0,3,2,0,3,3,2,0,0,13,13,0,0,8,0,4,2,11,9,0,0,3,8,22,7,24,26,1,24,0,1,3,0,7,11,0,8,10,116,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214472455931924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09376278333856868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174345225767621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859668878837774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15336967881318456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549637081404075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13725256083430806,0.0,0.0,0.3143181625668824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083953652225307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117125842244592,0.0,0.0,0.2034083410436091,0.09579794585036798,0.0,0.0,0.12256097773274745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005943280218031,0.12863674854457566,0.07620963754743419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4282418793016112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988147509840666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369545210189389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471571012158468,0.13102470411911812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513685680042006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951039638811526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12866837488683985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296502658324786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14457777080699707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787264265295698,0.0,0.0,0.15190420997075307,0.0,0.12755565303154784,0.10663822827671776,0.0,0.0,0.2137137135774723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103233368354968,0.13262400824974346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070148316592976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569536345031354,0.1781743580247986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104213143757407,0.0,0.0,0.13959828140144762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643887055037587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nectarivore,2020/02/22,"Looking for helpful sources for improving social life Hello!

My social life has been the main thing that makes me feel depressed since high school. I don't have a lot of friends, there are two people, aside from family, that I talk to at least once a week. It's not that I have bad social anxiety, I just don't think I posses this friendship making skill. Everytime I try to put myself out there, it just feels so unnatural and I never have success. Like it feels really hard to connect to people.

I'm curious if anyone has/had similar issues and what are some things they have found to actually be helpful. Books, articles, videos, or even your own advice/experience. I'm open to whatever",3.731234096692109,6.085539419847332,4.701087786259542,80.80191157760818,74.64885496183207,8.030788804071248,25.4204834605598,8.841846274778883,2.1327094147582693,548,19,99,12,12,178,95,131,0.087,0.762,0.15,0.8596,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,1,2,6,5,0,0,3,0,11,2,0,2,1,19,21,5,0,1,5,0,4,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,10,4,0,0,5,2,0,1,4,2,0,1,2,5,12,3,12,18,5,7,0,1,1,0,10,4,0,4,3,66,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.1521973564037819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931124172124975,0.0,0.0,0.10905293180005823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022256161852658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433067365393436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301206779371766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15256170720975926,0.14702800352882164,0.0,0.2365786845650001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17100534160107808,0.12049660026562665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397121828432901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20907737643840305,0.16478343601611106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16278481553576313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22032250981684506,0.07619562695163437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13096961074687574,0.0,0.0,0.13259413598318492,0.0,0.0,0.20821298109256212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12028825380862446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660954681813461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21625016542364708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567858575917726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999138693619196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784284755551645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901417674183085,0.0,0.0,0.4769538073562455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535712390008613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072297282818069,0.0999347707865131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588861589937164,0.0,0.15235315499229554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251040833863559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LowVELOcityCycling,2020/02/22,"I publicly talked about my struggles with mental health for the first time ever. It's an ongoing battle, but it's one I'm winning. I was invited to speak at an event called ""Bike Minds.""[Video of my talk.](https://youtu.be/W3yre8osBlk) I talked about how riding a bike helped me overcome my mental health issues. It was one of the hardest things I've ever done but I was able to rehearse and prepare for that. After my talk was a different story. Strangers were hugging me and telling me how much they appreciated it and **it was the first time I'd ever felt anyone cared what I had to say.** I was completely unprepared and was an absolute wreck. But after I spent a day crying I felt sooooo good. 

I'm so proud and glad I did it. If it helps anyone it's worth doing. I know it helped me.",1.1916374807987715,3.823804341935485,2.285990783410142,91.81946236559143,89.45161290322581,5.0168970814132114,20.284178187403995,6.655083550727371,0.4364500768049155,623,20,123,8,21,197,88,155,0.069,0.72,0.21,0.9787,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,4,8,8,1,1,9,0,12,3,0,2,3,18,19,12,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,12,6,0,0,3,2,2,1,0,2,0,4,14,4,19,6,13,5,1,13,0,0,0,1,12,1,0,1,11,85,31,0,0.13414816041777905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18759902572839987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698027045004013,0.0,0.13677299005214907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406517939224837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735545510659914,0.08651446566904973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015627565608005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13728014335387775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640340736750167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576065424837197,0.0,0.0,0.2282127134434867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251711234207107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851864429466223,0.0,0.0,0.2697500526185306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14001582668990722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372432068813359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703795874341211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861433319223398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18180453056153306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668000147712092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402407839569738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312928396072321,0.11725140502465388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891220769719995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15644574226107252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hurock,2020/02/22,"Can't cope with being single. 30M It's been 2 years since I ended my relationship, and honestly, I just can't continue like that. I do many activities, but always by myself, it's like I just can't bring other people along... Everywhere I go, all I see is couples, friends, young families, etc. It's tormenting me.

And add to that the shame I feel... I've just spent the whole afternoon playing a silly video game when it's so sunny outside, but I couldn't bear to go out, because it's boring alone.

I could've gone shopping... But I don't need anything.

Somewhere deep down, there's this immense feeling of nostalgia... I always think about the months I've spent in Southeast Asia... In the warmth of the tropics, without a single worry in the world. I was never able to find a sustainable way to stay over there tough... I thought I missed my home, my parents, my friends, but somehow I miss more the warmer climates.",2.6220801840289205,4.84293820111732,3.6784817614196506,87.4437364442984,77.60335195530726,6.446401577390734,26.17186986526454,7.510576382923642,1.4378081498521196,714,28,140,10,17,230,113,179,0.105,0.722,0.17300000000000001,0.9206,1,1,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,0,0,9,12,0,1,10,0,10,0,0,0,2,24,24,8,0,2,8,1,2,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,9,6,0,0,5,4,3,4,7,5,0,0,6,3,21,7,17,16,6,22,1,2,1,0,5,8,0,1,10,88,30,0,0.17791450864863684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18426577475157888,0.0,0.0,0.2960782472595903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464084813192445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845503312944267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205025812060798,0.19685901983167906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157579446838786,0.0,0.19842170671964535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677219647681539,0.0,0.17991784261120414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16261063771176582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749126160918323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20222583061296212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17846275843693318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17384008423353506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803773869833849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14200966339991972,0.0,0.0,0.1319213538164108,0.13721863715137772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975530070917385,0.0,0.0,0.12334351877117908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910135996424888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177482872387734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471727200719554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18963319394082426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400043326905004,0.0,0.14124424662355314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122025572656724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986351952128063,0.0,0.1715032374432392,0.0,0.0,0.18068081970845665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145711104134256
mentalhealth,Bri2116,2020/02/22,"(Warning! May trigger!)I don’t know what to do... So I’ve had depression for a really long time and I’ve also had a record for attempting suicide. I’ve been having suicidal thoughts lately and I’ve also been self harming for some time. I don’t know what to do. I don’t feel like I’m alone but I do. Some days it’s extremely hard for me to pretend to be ok and some other days it’s totally fine. I feel so pathetic. I always think I’m going to fail at life. Not succeed at my dream career, become homeless or just straight up dead. I’ve OD multiple times last year and I tried hanging myself the beginning of this year. I don’t feel hopeful in my life. I don’t know why I’m like this. I’ve gotten help from professionals but the pain never goes away. My parents know about this but I’m scared that if I tell them they’re going to sigh and just give me the same advice over and over again. I’m just lost. I feel like if I was gone that would be better as I wouldn’t have to worry about my life and everyone could just carry on. I feel broken. I don’t know what to do anymore...",0.07195491143317413,2.2512741826086966,2.200048309178744,94.46174718196457,87.6086956521739,5.3204508856682775,18.51851851851852,6.775458762138228,0.07042673107890574,842,23,190,11,27,282,119,230,0.217,0.6579999999999999,0.125,-0.9784,1,1,0,0,0,2,27.0,0,0,1,5,11,15,0,1,5,1,23,4,0,0,2,41,48,18,4,6,11,1,6,3,0,3,4,0,0,1,11,7,0,0,12,2,0,4,9,6,1,0,9,6,22,8,25,33,5,26,0,3,0,0,6,9,0,8,16,115,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246632625016045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979910184402,0.0,0.200445020033012,0.104280598558407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242889136537714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774714245925245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13841182723188353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083994705399752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006196726236126,0.0,0.0,0.16164876068601994,0.0,0.10794240342409687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975359075636242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168409110174153,0.17906468307700465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022334302537807,0.14245038840561192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226675481865946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400283382969871,0.0,0.0,0.12447619265206675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34437723736410153,0.1021567576489865,0.1413722743032134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655626662678047,0.1836826738043627,0.0,0.0,0.11090885033938502,0.0,0.0,0.13680725052488535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966585134028352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333548393768813,0.0,0.1391587934420429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028652653161887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254723794131286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074150669010315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741708358485549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953974092283184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030332202548666,0.0,0.09949420274648893,0.21923438024671893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508757817201976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308649185031015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272738149567736,0.0,0.0890274199776878,0.0,0.0,0.16141062819705493
mentalhealth,98765435678987654,2020/02/22,"just a question information you might want to know: 

age - 18

gender - male

upbringing - strict Muslim/working class English

I have never really been the kind of person to go on a website like Reddit but i thought that it might help with understanding something. since i was a kid (5ish?) i would always have violent thoughts relating to anyone close to me. these would be due to minor reasons such as an insult in a joking manner. the problem is that these violent thoughts would usually reach the point of being able to picture the individuals lifeless eyes and a lot of blood.

my question - Is something is wrong with my current mental state? thanks",4.915916927899687,7.7007700431034545,5.103761755485895,77.25377742946708,72.70689655172414,7.321630094043888,30.373040752351088,8.296473431620573,2.6495793103448264,519,23,82,9,11,163,85,116,0.17600000000000002,0.72,0.105,-0.9372,1,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,2,9,3,0,10,0,14,2,2,1,1,24,22,3,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,3,5,4,0,0,9,1,0,1,1,5,0,0,5,1,8,4,14,10,1,11,0,0,1,0,9,4,0,5,6,57,13,1,0.1602127866307279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330987285551005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120245055450391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09105261874735944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738725373797607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683696306805676,0.08804875760590664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827187488733373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13620718192997755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614568064742019,0.33992089679694315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235659778546194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989162559069246,0.0,0.0,0.15145286871512376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330199959615232,0.0,0.0,0.358949974890249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263641359850807,0.1647254280583214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252967269419313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466792608737997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475024086628435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3815731699286113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16678716108997624,0.0,0.0,0.17645174978174188,0.0,0.09449765252497157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663681679224938,0.0,0.0,0.3414317006791725,0.1751675315561052,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LunaticGear,2020/02/22,"A switch in my head It feels like there's a switch in my head that flips from happy to sad. I go from feeling great or at least pretty good, where even work really isn't that bad and I get things done. To a dull, awful grey. Where the world sucks and works against me, all I want is to sleep, and chores become monumental efforts, and I feel equal parts furious and hopeless. And then one morning I'll wake up and for the first time in a week or more I'm feeling rested, feeling great again. I am currently in the middle of a down swing in emotions. Third day. When I feel like this is when I think I might have an issue. When I am happy I don't feel like there's any problem at all.
I just want to put my thoughts to paper so to speak. To get out some of what's in. Thank you.",0.8099698795180714,2.635304259036147,2.10444277108434,98.45377259036148,81.71084337349397,5.113855421686747,18.20632530120482,5.985473137389443,-0.5146373493975904,601,13,145,4,16,192,101,166,0.113,0.6509999999999999,0.23600000000000002,0.9546,1,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,1,0,4,11,16,2,0,9,1,9,4,4,0,2,27,26,14,0,3,3,0,7,3,0,1,0,1,1,0,6,8,0,0,9,0,0,2,2,7,0,3,2,9,16,9,24,23,8,27,0,3,1,0,2,15,1,4,13,96,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906251277203442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112711479148923,0.0,0.1471813036036572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08594523965002447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136376902157296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14990577998299892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802062323171922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4716813797750377,0.2856147557444246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133555885504336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13925147426885595,0.0,0.0757378696737401,0.11177680067932903,0.0,0.2938514263208801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837272615133085,0.0,0.0,0.273537754077702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13909458593541754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953204138735908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137366357589992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030416952665198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431357829917835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557895001884546,0.0,0.12751711071982605,0.0,0.13396866206765962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537330857526078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336176902034888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269299178386535,0.0,0.0,0.08853569405106584,0.08539116819558057,0.0,0.1057979419396148,0.07770820004997164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15720692034721362,0.0,0.10689756670598148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19403778059107105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,69noah420,2020/02/22,"What do I have? Will it go away I've been miserable and began hating me since months now. 

When I imagine myself being in a relationship I am happy and excited, but It always leads to me thinking that I don't deserve love. The idea of me being with another boy makes me happy, but I always tell myself that no one is ever going to love me. 

I am also very confused about my sexuality. I want to be with a boy. I cant really imagine being with a girl, I had a few crushes, so I guess I just have a very specific taste personality wise in women. Sex with a woman seem really nice to me (except when it involves the vagina, I hate it). The idea of me making love makes me happy, but I am also not sure, because I am scared of it. I don't want to be gay, I am scared of the concept (hard to explain)

My friends at school don't show any dislike towards me, yet, I still think they hate me. Mentioning friends, no one ever wants to talk with me. I am rarely the last choice, because I am never being chosen to talk or hang out with (except with my best friend Gideon, who I assume chooses me as a alternative when he's bored). No one wants to talk with me in general, I normally need to text my friends first and start a conversation. This is especially bad because I always need someone to talk with, that's just me.

Rarely introverted, mostly extroverted (depends on the person). In school, I am very extroverted, which is why no one likes me.

 I want someone to go to me and ask if I am alright, not that one time asking thing where you go ""You alright?"" and after I say yes, they leave. NO, I want someone to straight up ask If I have any problems right now. 

I had a friend who did that, she  is now gone. I changed schools because I want to get my higher education, and she got a job. We regularly talk, but I am normally the one to talk with her, but its hard for me to approach anyone about this topic. 

If someone has a similar problem or knows what is going on with me, PLEAS respond",3.376538889364252,4.3639136377171255,5.143302815093693,82.93893300248142,72.67245657568239,7.742243518439293,27.047916488405924,8.104835398774808,1.6302652348763584,1528,53,318,22,29,523,183,403,0.16699999999999998,0.677,0.156,-0.7665,1,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,1,2,2,3,18,30,3,4,18,3,35,7,1,5,4,72,72,23,0,16,16,0,2,1,5,1,0,1,0,7,19,19,1,0,11,1,0,9,12,11,0,7,7,4,65,19,50,58,3,41,0,1,0,6,43,14,0,11,19,237,84,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926956306744348,0.17054096089309645,0.0,0.0,0.09291869884886912,0.07163856197919723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047770322407483336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19160748526676225,0.0,0.06418806916152649,0.0,0.057043617723646176,0.166586823897906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169670929697565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227257804243456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359712423341215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058112214902785536,0.0,0.0,0.2639159419504737,0.0,0.035693924321345306,0.0,0.19413667270587834,0.0,0.05464104728780887,0.0,0.07526122124579067,0.0,0.0,0.21818094465855709,0.12240103789073307,0.20235298259409384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15424795810237218,0.0,0.0,0.06779619217359048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0375464057435313,0.05568920729910407,0.0,0.07234009145963738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033377274736578484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849820396243372,0.0,0.1368106442262052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05453167572308154,0.0,0.0,0.1013155346619952,0.05269192282520648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387647874123007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27776885321267925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930725378453165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074435652788086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875339649033722,0.0,0.0,0.07334917515485508,0.0,0.05834416154756624,0.0,0.05433011227223427,0.13679872987861766,0.2074278130715483,0.0,0.06219516773778309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056514288211827864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315462999164615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04835663004128396,0.0,0.05455974342796917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438996909204345,0.0,0.0,0.32947396054025674,0.05971392867324676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045388192545740426,0.08755227652095325,0.0,0.0,0.03983743262030223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16911130529672436,0.2820747401770336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06164738615745255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatshortgurl,2020/02/22,"Impulse I have been known for thinking things through for years, but a year ago my mental health deteriorated and I ended up having to be institutionalized. I’ve gotten a lot better, but I struggle really bad with being impulsive. I have schizo-affective disorder and I have voices in my head, one of which likes to tell me what to do, for instance: steal, run away, dye my hair, get new piercings, get new tattoos, move out, completely redo my room, drop out, get into a car accident, break a bone, and a lot more. I’ve only acted on the piercing feeling, getting my second holes. I have such a guilty conscience that these acts will tear me apart but there are times that the need for it is stronger than what the consequences could/would be. I see a therapist weekly and she knows about it. I’m not sure if it’s because I want attention, I want to break out of this mold my family has put me in, grow up, etc. I’m 18 so I can do most of these legally. I have too much anxiety to be a full time student and to have a job at all. All of my symptoms get worse around my period and I truthfully don’t know what to do. I’ve talked to people about it, cried it out, and then 5 minutes later I feel an even stronger urge to do it, especially if they don’t approve, but I always feel guilty even if I don’t do the action.",6.1378464818763305,5.119888179104481,6.84586353944563,80.07664179104479,66.46268656716418,10.045202558635397,31.083155650319828,9.23628265651192,2.357439445628997,1024,32,219,16,14,340,158,268,0.152,0.759,0.08900000000000001,-0.9656,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,1,2,9,7,0,1,14,0,25,5,3,0,4,40,43,16,0,6,8,0,4,1,0,1,2,1,1,0,16,14,0,0,8,0,0,8,4,3,0,2,2,6,28,4,35,36,9,39,0,0,1,0,4,16,0,6,13,151,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958347450289862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225020102469813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320051601035354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009237612610907,0.0,0.0,0.12674592008341806,0.0,0.1126384686081803,0.08223568859651106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193108450697042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414433525651679,0.0,0.0,0.10770916254221387,0.0,0.1481847405410998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461066066569898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11948412116548368,0.0,0.15045263657897748,0.17820447425134428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12717465356363014,0.0,0.2046332095109716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3524065561243325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844951860027369,0.14339570606094176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387052870480204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14827845124344707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590684922643432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22937961345472346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595061337413805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14338066499923832,0.09916931386865446,0.10002895263264083,0.0,0.26058054396359603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141384406491072,0.10259990019281873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352483612225257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561489406337268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642239177119132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750031906629304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14103002952222507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714459218545235,0.14021599306489396,0.0,0.10843001619484946,0.11791127121210745,0.0,0.0,0.1566329176343081,0.08962363723165773,0.08644047085386855,0.0,0.0,0.1573261859151801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591387084103981,0.0,0.10821114401472838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374778023197169,0.09583130445505128,0.0,0.0,0.1737463700162233
mentalhealth,twentynuggets,2020/02/22,"How to you motivate yourself I have a really hard time motivating myself to go to work if I’m having a bad mental health moment. Let it be noted I am in no way looking to take my life. I am not a suicidal person. But I can get really really down on myself. I’m a heavy over thinker. I have a blessed life for the most part. I have an amazing family and partner who care for me and are more than understanding. It’s truly beautiful to have someone by your side who does everything they can to understand you. 
When things are rough and I’m in my head, especially before work, I do everything I can to not go. I do not like my job. I LOVED my job for two years before my promotion. Now I dread going to work sometimes. I used to be praised for my work, and now I don’t feel like I’m doing a good job at all. I have called twice this year for a mental health day. I know that may not seem like a lot but to my job, that’s probably a lot. Absences are not something people are fired for so I don’t fear getting fired...but I fear that my mental health gets in the way of bettering myself at my job. I don’t know how to get out of that funk. Does anyone have advice? I know my partner struggles with stress and anxiety at work, too. I’m sure he would benefit from any advice as well.",1.0497521367521363,2.931281411111112,3.2755555555555564,90.07461538461538,81.18518518518519,6.820512820512822,20.754985754985753,7.882392219407189,0.8076780626780624,991,28,222,18,26,339,136,270,0.129,0.746,0.125,-0.4684,5,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,3,1,10,8,19,0,5,12,0,27,7,1,5,2,35,51,13,1,2,8,0,4,3,2,2,5,0,0,3,10,7,0,0,10,0,0,3,9,6,1,2,0,5,37,13,34,46,6,24,2,0,1,1,13,11,0,6,11,150,47,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16989646260550972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591162448532073,0.0,0.06650218389319107,0.0,0.0,0.060784365496779874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258397963898877,0.0,0.0,0.14794421659185195,0.0,0.0,0.07688364424923498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876654654846126,0.0,0.08863222380966443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05606347774534348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214828104397293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625644089927293,0.0,0.08195106502173803,0.19564369500045745,0.04395506229247684,0.06210371692341001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18167200325390104,0.0,0.14821513285287272,0.07291382516180432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787334321162145,0.0,0.08921656307372991,0.2772116259477428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43132936064545946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14332545824189485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889311372908333,0.1228042542536012,0.12741068290697607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300037291253123,0.0,0.0,0.1478117147571697,0.07845886553408263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628188222457729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413809442236593,0.0,0.060267197208186636,0.07590503219337702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372661252716108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670711934080032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791389636364421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365658328351797,0.06692393900993461,0.08597724922468601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957947650096466,0.09087943859513507,0.0,0.09508870027079043,0.0,0.08193169353623632,0.0,0.06536149658962231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057753273285556024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050690322836641766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084919219545772,0.18099703650622134,0.0,0.07508070631934538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800399220736806,0.0,0.0,0.0781616520902539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164350008860629,0.0,0.0,0.0617534802922384,0.0,0.0,0.11196177593176083
mentalhealth,psychnotmyname,2020/02/22,help with a friend Hello to anyone who sees this. I don’t know if this is the right place to be posting this on here but I need help. My very close friend I have known for 7+ years is seeming to be going through a mental break from reality and I don’t exactly know how to handle it. My mother has had schizophrenia all my life so I know what the warning signs are of something being up and her mind taking over. She’s barley eating or sleeping and has not formed any sentences making any sense. I’ve been able to have her call and make a doctor appointment but those aren’t until the weekend is over. She’s making all these connections that are very clear to her but make no logical sense you know? And she is finding reasonings for everything happening that don’t correlate. She’s constantly hysterically crying or laughing and repeating the same phrases over and over. I love her and just don’t know what to do.,4.605737356566087,5.885915022099455,5.095248618784531,83.33070123246921,70.04972375690608,8.221164470888228,27.182745431364218,8.617729084823388,1.8721097322566933,733,24,143,12,13,234,108,181,0.06,0.8029999999999999,0.13699999999999998,0.9474,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,7,0,21,5,1,6,4,41,37,17,0,2,8,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,11,10,1,0,10,1,0,1,7,0,0,0,2,1,18,4,20,32,4,17,0,0,1,1,18,9,0,4,5,101,29,1,0.14920754628094093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029324960316356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432938560788456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235758715660624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16124035057777306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638974833429998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15272024608362858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15267656955016734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340981216391861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637299417816487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305547602626667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479808704071211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194374041074725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000213462240484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4100028266078158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10538970252960353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466563597009348,0.0,0.398388783032452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15036611266177158,0.0,0.15065708745355255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063550496536366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15589012865619065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14289958456184812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15341020805854844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742242926774142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11889909641977073,0.13583294629063986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493153021864291,0.0,0.0,0.11486725874823685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218550569501938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24622370392027865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608476784336144
mentalhealth,givenwings,2020/02/22,"My mental health psychosis experience blog Hi there, 

So at the start of my psychosis I struggled to find people who had been through what i'd been through so I thought id set up a blog to share my experiences. 

I'd really like some feedback on it? Is it engaging, is it helpful?

Should i continue with recounting my story or do you think its better left as it is. 

https://thenightmymindranaway.wordpress.com/

here it is ^. 

thank you for your time.",4.186415662650603,6.850378168674703,4.663478915662652,80.10678463855425,74.5421686746988,7.523493975903612,27.24246987951807,8.472884824447931,2.0397,360,14,67,7,8,114,60,83,0.027000000000000003,0.79,0.183,0.9109999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,0,1,4,6,0,1,2,0,9,1,0,0,0,7,13,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,10,5,11,8,1,8,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,4,46,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349297277957467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5196777136130409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24278263947582154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28235416631484483,0.0,0.0,0.17804738643612256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28860971200074353,0.0,0.0,0.12977427273770228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676943623607026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841556337942807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17017052357982845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880155448634165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776960168820016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445580591857972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17020612230490387,0.0,0.2108819662021344,0.15489203018637174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ghostpantomimes,2020/02/22,"Could I be not so healthy? (I don't have much money to see good therapist right now.)
I don't know how much is the healthy amount of crying but I do cry more than twice a day, mostly at night I cry a lot, sounds make me cry but mostly happy humans, looking at happy people makes me cry so badly, also I keep staring at my childhood pictures i feel like I was my own child like is not myself I want to hug that little kid and play with that kid and so I have been to multiple psychologist and they all have told me I'm healthy strong and very smart, my life is quite complicated I do not believe such things yet that's what they said, oh and one tried to take advantage of me(school counselor).
Is that normal to cry that much? Is normal to stare at your toddler years pictures everyday?",1.732937500000002,3.914643418750003,2.765000000000004,93.05,80.4375,5.5,21.25,6.6274283507984215,0.2839999999999998,617,18,132,6,16,196,97,160,0.192,0.624,0.184,0.1668,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,2,3,8,11,0,0,3,0,16,2,0,3,1,25,28,12,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,0,4,7,6,0,1,2,1,1,0,5,1,0,2,4,7,21,10,14,22,10,13,0,0,4,1,9,6,0,3,9,90,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941997981479767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336248818462158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597941940332313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927674123663128,0.0,0.7369540579978139,0.07211268663721546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05653801299331521,0.07988205615510845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378675809762142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380624591107144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938804872727017,0.0,0.0,0.06145167509515007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897962328462951,0.10925623382883486,0.1120699659069376,0.0,0.0,0.09389808174499974,0.0,0.0,0.09506277791051393,0.0,0.0,0.14927737364040278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24659498683028636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493263910435004,0.21911375300966632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577006365480046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751979865605467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189310971921204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549107000042716,0.1063635315759591,0.0,0.0,0.11316472972708265,0.08910363744008623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407243559017967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12982810493300562,0.07428621744858993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684589386575803,0.0,0.07591637369069038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226069963480196,0.06595253809497685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07200645400368336
mentalhealth,perth1985,2020/02/22,"Homeopathy  

Hello Folks

I am just curious if any of the members have had success in using homeopathy for psychiatric illness.

I have heard of many cases in India where patients were able to stop their medication or reduce it substantially using [homeopathy.](https://homeopathy.one/)

One of the successful psychiatrist is Dr.Mahesh Gandhi,who left allopathy and became homeopath as he felt the medications were drugging his patients.

It would be great to know about the experiences in the west.",9.597637130801687,12.467743215189873,8.514620253164562,57.46830168776373,59.886075949367104,11.342616033755275,37.21729957805907,11.20814326018867,5.274061603375527,410,19,51,12,6,127,63,79,0.055999999999999994,0.7859999999999999,0.158,0.875,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,2,3,3,0,0,5,0,9,4,0,2,0,10,14,4,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,2,4,3,11,7,0,7,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,2,1,37,6,2,0.24169894802611336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436357286784556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802940453728774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364279495614649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23206889356161234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664739434710333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283142086158714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626066142319496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24504479714851696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4869725242346534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16378146240043467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20207114311230603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4175005761861923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169599799615334,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chickpeas12,2020/02/22,"Anxious about being happy? (sorry for grammar mistakes, I'm not a native English speaker)

Here's the thing : I'm gonna graduate of college in June. This week was full of good news : I got the job I applied for, which is gonna start in September. I got another job, kind of a summer job, at NGO I aslo wanted to work for and I got a volunteer job abroad for the other part of the summer.
I should be 100% happy but a part of me can't stop feeling anxious and is telling me '' this is too amazing to be true, something is definitely gonna go wrong'' or'' do I really deserve all this? '' 
I' ve been working a lot to achieve my goals, and now that it's done (or nearly done) , I can't feel as much happy and proud of myself as I thought I would be. Why is this?",2.800668953687821,3.3789091698113225,4.66739851343625,87.34476843910811,73.65408805031447,7.291252144082332,27.66209262435677,7.348242739294969,1.3525547169811325,574,21,128,6,11,197,95,159,0.03,0.765,0.205,0.9841,4,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,5,4,10,0,0,9,0,18,0,0,0,2,20,32,9,0,4,4,0,2,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,9,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,8,3,15,8,20,15,6,13,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,3,7,88,24,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330526966975938,0.0,0.2866937085005274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597001083384987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831635132501532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211313883971049,0.10642728639147174,0.3044507800478262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4052225819842566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5036653972559598,0.0,0.0,0.13213389408057344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787528746137276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327697505288396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748137795048749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128743627215892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768426231445082,0.0,0.1420402632804319,0.08981168594742367,0.0,0.0,0.1060837029433604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090534233071836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429847347011281,0.0,0.0,0.10073456923085797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484158534163649,0.0,0.1017815671698042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449630961309384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847513466141857,0.0,0.0,0.09013729999965793,0.13873165535594342,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RamenRabbxt,2020/02/22,"Problem finding local help I live with my family who make enough where I get insurance with a copay that's too high for the money I make. 

Basically I live with my parents, but they don't support me in any way besides letting me live here and buying food sometimes. It's complicated and home life isn't so good. But that being said I'm on their insurance which a single therapy visit copay is 20 dollars each time and I'd want to go at least once or twice a week. I get 4 hours a week at my current job (looking for a new one) so I REALLY can't afford therapy let alone go to a psychiatrist again. 

I want to get medicated, the pain i suffer from day to day anxiety and depression is getting way too much to deal with. I physically hurt from the chest pain and it is only getting worse as things in my life get worse. 

I live in the USA, Northern California. I can't drive but if I get help within my county, I can bus or get rides. I live in Shasta County. Vague enough to not dox myself I hope. 

Any advice helps, this is my last shot at getting help. It's really starting to feel like I have no options and this pain is ruining my life.",2.935650118203309,4.201308127659576,4.866773049645392,83.4236111111111,74.1063829787234,7.945626477541372,25.39598108747045,8.515128840125781,1.637718676122932,890,29,186,16,18,306,131,235,0.231,0.6970000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.9922,4,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,0,7,12,0,0,10,0,14,9,1,2,0,27,36,15,0,5,7,1,1,1,0,0,7,1,1,0,10,11,1,0,2,0,3,5,6,8,0,2,1,3,28,4,25,32,6,30,0,4,1,0,11,12,0,5,12,116,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876913509325347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294194525996777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205041338084065,0.0,0.06864964998239645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574772131378867,0.09251637642391317,0.07729157450047468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18544756453893216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845974011690005,0.0,0.04537444433673581,0.06410914920095494,0.0,0.0,0.08201929527754523,0.0,0.10851206047900794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4219616121746728,0.0,0.10200083061719196,0.07526833380802724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405991003809623,0.09481357365999048,0.09001495773129824,0.08913050490549751,0.08837427281667537,0.0,0.09606684065162596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905154057195817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314879411690882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835272403429068,0.19015471170989864,0.04384166190005656,0.0,0.3962033695791501,0.0,0.0753576763295256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198021918771964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904020228614448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596806827394681,0.0,0.0,0.08666993066938085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556849455101153,0.060809079655879825,0.06825011646026252,0.2864640357006195,0.0,0.09964390183589998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586755388920342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149774666851203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536179266722063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875359755408391,0.0,0.06351731954235082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183410195694056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052474209794486,0.0,0.05961822250467545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052327197642398425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586009695851184,0.14246037057106611,0.14396550420465962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18290224457115725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jeswhale,2020/02/22,"help? how to feel better It’s been hard coping lately and I really don’t know who to turn to... I don’t ask for help and I shut myself out. I find myself asking people online for help than turning to people who I know irl. If there’s something you can say to help motivate me, inspire me, comfort me or anything to just help get through these days because it’s been hard trudging through nowadays. Im not religious but now I pray for patience and endurance just to get by. But it gets harder and harder.. I’ve been just wanting this life to end and I think about overdosing just to escape it all. But I’m too much of a coward and I’ve been trying so hard to hold on.",0.9251318944844122,3.1297922086330985,2.6254388489208655,92.74444124700241,83.74820143884892,4.8577458033573135,20.77745803357314,6.079149491110277,0.13640105515587564,523,16,110,4,15,172,82,139,0.057999999999999996,0.78,0.161,0.8779,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,2,10,3,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,2,1,28,20,13,0,2,10,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,8,7,0,1,7,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,5,13,3,21,16,2,7,1,0,0,0,11,3,0,2,4,73,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589575373781034,0.0,0.2860454954926209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325981677740168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530509369662702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866434120502744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550159836777514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735512383680793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982788849417455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23978910920219165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4111405007895245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.512721794091639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652528533563518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16815596039877326,0.0,0.1725766686931277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805966139081173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246348391036312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21212466824939644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980077696143724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166187450958227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117777323469896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802827229352253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386853334904217,0.3328131396102856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023604618527954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fourrtwentyblaiseit,2020/02/22,"When do you know you need to speak to your doctor again? Hi everyone. I’ve struggled with panic disorder and agoraphobia for about 3 years. When I was initially diagnosed I was prescribed prozac and referred for CBT. After about almost 2 years I felt ready to discontinue seeing my therapist and October last year after talking to my doctor, I decided to stop taking medication as well. 

Everything has seemed fine and good, but my boyfriend is worried that I am not myself. Since towards the end of January, panic attacks have suddenly become more random and frequent (i’ve been waking up in the middle of the night having them sometimes), having generally anxious/paranoid thoughts, sore stomach and feeling nauseous, tense muscles, feeling of guilt and lack of faith and confidence in myself. I am unsure if this is something that I can manage myself through coping strategies or need to see my doctor again for. I’ve still been able to attend school and continue normal every day for the most part. Part of me feels like I am overreacting, but I’m not sure if thats the anxiety speaking. I thought maybe an outside opinion might provide some clarity or insight as to what I should look into. Thank you.",8.013481035093939,8.764083244239632,7.72276497695853,69.42502658631692,62.17972350230414,10.179227224388516,37.89046437433535,10.035473477838034,4.114294859978731,972,46,149,19,13,309,144,217,0.156,0.726,0.11800000000000001,-0.8452,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,4,1,0,8,12,1,4,6,0,17,9,2,0,1,44,33,19,0,7,8,0,4,1,0,2,7,2,0,0,5,11,0,1,11,0,0,1,2,5,1,0,7,9,23,7,30,24,6,25,1,0,3,0,9,6,0,11,19,110,28,5,0.12218643158069716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223520614345942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347228572026316,0.13803588870117284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900470532902925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349453139804926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880014013826853,0.0,0.0,0.12401665605022852,0.0,0.0,0.14003623632747145,0.3751889706157865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822091152619977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294733846431947,0.11675437155984746,0.10981328607814092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853433932960669,0.08729001113525348,0.11731813570868528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10248418171390752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715046734550778,0.09959824974405096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05969411859527456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026058290886371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275269349544575,0.0,0.0,0.1230899751529913,0.0,0.12962049494544833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18119938159686813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466368890261093,0.11971676031324728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867189018451367,0.0,0.2646319968421196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365919198191905,0.1947335328783803,0.1112339383096322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010738788432972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406508451976653,0.12084550513227513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975782420949928,0.10215332794769746,0.0,0.12773578780668166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515926574778595,0.0,0.0918689902596524,0.09820882536479683,0.0,0.11249284993469984,0.0,0.14186786458358075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940047566364467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986027599156856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408625234072927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23605216769534865
mentalhealth,lonesomehufflepuff,2020/02/22,"Feeling lonely and at my lowest. I feel like I literally have no one lately. 

Me (31yo F) and my husband have been drifting apart for a while, and honestly, I feel like we're more friends than lovers these days. I try to talk to him about stuff but he brushes it off and that makes me worse. I have acquaintances but no friends that I feel like I can really talk to about anything. 

Work is so stressful at the moment too and it's really dragging me down to the point where I feel sick thinking about going into work.  

It hurts so much to feel this lonely like no one cares and I don't know what to do anymore.  It's getting to the point where I can't enjoy anything anymore and I'm so low. I don't dare go back to my drs because I stupidly came off my medication on my own two years ago and I feel ridiculous going back.",2.4286050420168053,3.967680835294118,3.5833613445378165,90.99941176470593,75.94117647058823,6.26890756302521,24.495798319327733,6.868970318607317,0.7474621848739496,642,21,140,6,14,208,95,170,0.237,0.63,0.133,-0.9737,1,5,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,11,17,2,1,4,0,10,4,0,1,0,22,27,14,0,0,2,1,7,4,3,0,3,0,0,0,10,10,0,0,9,0,0,5,6,7,0,3,2,8,22,10,20,25,3,26,0,4,0,1,8,13,0,0,12,94,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127453901673416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522746579737229,0.0,0.0,0.20933144894831865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19560100761604687,0.0,0.0775332447483695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454703528659055,0.12967768038970384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202639442070714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4501741231495837,0.2725915792714813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19653183935154925,0.0,0.06645101228732729,0.0,0.2168533497285053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615847418160398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989975792368515,0.0,0.1434747520851321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24855251820114596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489965704589204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281295545086344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349856266701792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172373140329604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404694659615421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16296108337614218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14569459020679634,0.0,0.14560099571880056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044594294079178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149758696325468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635299420571993,0.0,0.12424518914078013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851902396001672,0.0,0.12961647523888792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190555743203284
mentalhealth,strulia54,2020/02/22,"When I get angry, all my other emotions fade away. Why is this? I have been through 12 years of bullism, child abuse  and got out of a breakup recently. I also have a strange reaction to images that are too ""lightly"" and my head starts shaking around like an epileptic attack, just not to the point where I would get seizures or fall into coma. I usually have anxiety outbursts when I get into danger, but if something gets me angry in the meantime, all of my anxiety fades away and I get so pissed I feel like losing touch with reality or seeing interferences up my face. I usually would be a coward or just ""unemotional(as in lacking empathy) to talk to a girl had she disrespected me, but had she done something that got me Really pissed off, I wouldn't hesitate to do anything to her with no remorse. What is this? Do I have a personality disorder?",4.857777777777779,6.398038666666665,5.8453703703703725,77.1991666666667,69.74074074074073,9.103703703703703,32.01851851851852,9.516144504307137,3.0929407407407403,672,30,123,15,12,222,102,162,0.29600000000000004,0.665,0.038,-0.9937,0,0,2,0,1,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,9,8,4,1,8,0,17,5,4,0,2,26,27,13,0,5,9,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,3,6,9,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,6,0,0,6,4,21,2,22,17,3,23,0,1,1,0,7,12,2,4,11,96,27,0,0.0,0.18067135392440467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194325465582208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333032341713309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254832483167703,0.1357451533804845,0.0,0.1734752021329091,0.28653183352800154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17476253300446162,0.0,0.0,0.15604644702344886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17152658540113616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710166486793467,0.10893625715783338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3983390416320156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24391447927600785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15649495616701736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489942267054827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17059318709135768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314517256332545,0.0,0.0,0.14414885991308046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768664094188226,0.0,0.1505618444732573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151185421446925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347828372009489,0.0,0.0,0.10793060182334688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256272757865985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3358842757683113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375951856680179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21664381273033467,0.0,0.0,0.09819619033263106
mentalhealth,boringunsername_626,2020/02/22,"Help I feel so lonely it hurts. I am fine most of the time, like 95% of the time. But sonetimes, something sets me off and I feel like shit and helpless.

I am a 25 yo woman living in a big city. I live alone with my dog. I just started to go back to school (I'm studying to get a degree in a field I looove and I am also working in that field, so professionnally, everything is coming together!). I have friends, and I see them twice a month at parties/nights outs.

I feel fine most of the time, but when I stop and think about my life : I am so fucking lonely it hurts. The thing is, I have no idea how to get closer with my friends, it's all very nice but I never felt like we connect deeply. I don't know what it's like to have a bestie I can see/text all the time. I never talk to anyone about anything that's happening in my life because I don't think anyone cares. I don't make plans with anyone because I feel like they probably don't want to, or if they say yes it's out of pity. And even if they said yes, I suck at conversations. It's always awkward, I never know what to talk about, and I can feel the other person (or other people) getting bored. I feel like I fail at being a functional adult. 

Then again, I feel like there's no one I can talk to about this, because it would feel like dumping a huge ""hey I'm secretely really sad and lonely, but now you know so you have to feel sad for me and force yourself to hang out with me out of pity""

How do I fix that? I feel like I could disappear or die and no one would ever notice, or miss me.",2.1064156626506008,3.0643181114457825,3.6283566265060254,92.70218554216869,75.71686746987952,6.516819277108432,21.71373493975904,6.742157984588678,0.2445726265060241,1191,28,282,10,25,395,151,332,0.215,0.645,0.141,-0.9799,0,7,1,0,0,0,44.0,1,2,4,3,19,33,4,1,14,2,22,4,1,3,6,65,55,29,1,6,11,0,11,9,2,2,2,2,0,3,16,20,0,1,18,0,0,4,10,18,0,3,2,14,46,15,37,49,4,36,0,12,1,1,21,15,3,8,25,184,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745639302301647,0.0,0.06752819627588641,0.07026246624694668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17713132278403187,0.0,0.06948852928017278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493064665269037,0.0,0.1544250854313064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860941949813719,0.0,0.0,0.07273926224398658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742002534092609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876374116164151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05577311106278096,0.07638257745404789,0.0,0.0,0.07589097910240143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4269638671769637,0.36195207233121307,0.08107751350838419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047928098599285,0.07806522136599549,0.13235229974923896,0.0,0.047990305702013264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467173681334104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056599658596141064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18079370620031304,0.09532468234967376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392212608156028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11928769194549604,0.3712866395113576,0.0,0.14912757640282515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056365656800728726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740075823691855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953805107373704,0.0,0.0,0.07924304907987342,0.0,0.0,0.09613771885403173,0.0,0.0,0.11444010032019822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585414153498498,0.07373145297310413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104270328572106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409567492416045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032363071132348,0.06715162726414327,0.0,0.0854597607418993,0.13457860157006746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667844740152839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500753796289709,0.0,0.0,0.059768446271772004,0.0,0.0,0.07059725060046862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036137205145013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056099478917925424,0.10821398287569704,0.0,0.0,0.1969551185960725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967345157528769,0.04980604946002748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06147474472426515,0.0,0.0,0.11997027592302288,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GiltVoices,2020/02/22,"I’m tired of being alone.. I just got out of an abusive relationship, it is so hard to let go of that person that I live so deeply. I feel like nobody wants to talk to me, I’ve been trying I really have. I just can’t wait and be alone any longer.",0.16963636363636425,1.6078430545454587,2.6454545454545446,95.68818181818185,82.0909090909091,5.854545454545455,14.636363636363635,6.742157984588678,-0.7143454545454548,188,2,48,2,5,65,41,55,0.196,0.75,0.054000000000000006,-0.7859999999999999,0,2,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,0,0,7,13,3,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,6,1,7,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,29,9,0,0.0,0.2975741839354359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5202356888835384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17079204848279364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269900540665621,0.1794231189427329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273553301042233,0.0,0.20086928708954155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22498296098377596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568200505208577,0.0,0.12270023570401335,0.0,0.22177191615094008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21929633674551494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089447401737755,0.0,0.0,0.26964337715483194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20186655409346752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886624066911322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705157979403692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481360227409896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PineappleDishwasher,2020/02/22,"What should a therapy session consist of? How do I maximize the benefits of therapy? I’ve been seeing a therapist for a little over a year, and I like them and find it helpful.

But some weeks I’ll go in and have knots of emotions that I want to disentangle with them, but I leave feeling unfulfilled.

Other times I leave feeling hopeful and refreshed charged with a healthier mindset and new ideas for how to carry on.

Every season isn’t going to end in breakthroughs. Sure. But any advice for how to make the best use of my time with my therapist?",4.568207547169814,6.151241245283022,5.496367924528303,79.25606132075474,70.50943396226415,8.69622641509434,32.117924528301884,9.188382445141503,2.9934188679245293,436,20,79,9,8,143,70,106,0.076,0.7120000000000001,0.212,0.9365,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,1,3,5,0,0,7,0,5,0,0,5,1,25,14,11,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,3,9,5,18,12,2,14,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,2,8,56,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782457202461934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679064225402393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18023293115443245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19318695335614536,0.1521126876052506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470028125593742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17367611789961265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569693359873643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952101953322152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511523263568077,0.0,0.0,0.17057883908769414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19387613382800906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36370056175786425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390460480972292,0.17213088664930776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463930801379807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658697678541037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685636461223413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16186506996203012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3928045379473457,0.3988120569729598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002886135564145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833019136611075,0.0,0.0,0.10129804865371024,0.0,0.13776130070138706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059639995267764
mentalhealth,IzzyJune117,2020/02/22,"Mentally and Physically tired after socializing Hello, I've always had this problem. I can only hangout with my friends, even best friends, for a certain amount of time. If I go over this amount of time I become extremely tired. Does anyone else have this problem?",4.515106382978722,7.573494127659579,4.897276595744682,76.69400000000002,75.80851063829788,7.164255319148936,30.676595744680853,8.238735603445708,2.807105531914893,212,10,33,4,5,67,36,47,0.20600000000000002,0.581,0.213,0.1154,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,6,4,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,4,6,3,3,5,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.176988984452398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872944550542336,0.21794311430665184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349177994433067,0.0,0.0,0.22322252145052032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18614103552230224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776891242795309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14049074582805965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286732827257328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088609927108213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21435828869005805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617730032933205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4070631025573506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21682765769150714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480619332411728,0.4889500408919997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,newprofcauseshamelol,2020/02/22,? english isn’t my first language so expect mistakes.i don’t want to make this long . i for some reason want to be sick or just unwell . Like for example when i’m sick(which is really often bc shitty immune systems)i want to stop taking my meds . i don’t do it (most of the time) but it’s always on top of my head and i’m always considering it. when i’m ok i always for some reason want something to happen to me . it’s really wears bc ik i’m not subconsciously doing it for attention or not to go to school. Bc people around me is school are pretty chill and my parents don’t pay more attention to me.It happened with everything unpleasant that is not physical pain like breaking an arm or something. idk i don’t think it’s normal,1.2865811290959357,3.711476671140941,3.5087722068693274,85.51734701934465,84.30201342281879,6.4589024871693645,20.845242795104614,7.724431198458867,1.1058950651401491,580,18,113,11,17,198,84,149,0.106,0.755,0.139,0.4416,1,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,2,1,12,6,3,3,0,29,26,9,0,6,8,1,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,5,0,1,1,8,1,0,1,0,0,10,3,17,25,4,11,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,7,8,68,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3887291106190982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13862900953250845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995633983206066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324603162604801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850258110931279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754156843647167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15981963429263688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215955457613084,0.0,0.0,0.13781246415352508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394820453450264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729762975424601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15257825522197355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16570326863084722,0.0,0.17291511159113576,0.0,0.0,0.10796068673587757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584291593155104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995239158244279,0.3202241903211739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3152057189885795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397707127352877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019377155374826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708644809753654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978282755777887,0.0,0.0,0.0908049870877983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3674045303600229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gre167,2020/02/22,"Is it normal to laugh uncontrollably in situations of high stress? It happens to me every time I feel stressed and especially sleepy, if for 2/3 nights I haven’t sleep well for example",7.849411764705883,8.399286882352943,7.698823529411764,70.14470588235297,62.529411764705884,11.505882352941176,34.64705882352941,11.20814326018867,3.9359294117647066,150,6,27,4,2,48,30,34,0.195,0.66,0.145,-0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,3,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,4,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,3,2,6,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304537865620595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138300764372986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418742912983596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889906400351175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566815391535277,0.2679931423257966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074497941009104,0.2737191835240804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.626636250646486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15949267340296486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459288114940899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bayhippie,2020/02/22,"Can’t watch porn anymore because I start crying I have got to figure this out. I used to really like watching porn, but recently have not been able to enjoy it. I pick a video and then my depression hits. My brain starts looping with how I’ll never compare and how I am such a disgusting blob. I start crying. Have you ever had a sad orgasm? I’m literally peaking and tears are falling out of my eyes. It sucks! I like having sex, I like learning new stuff, but I don’t know how to combat my self hatred/anxiety while I’m in that zone. I don’t know what is at the core of this issue and don’t have the ability to talk to a therapist about this so I figured I’d just see if anyone can relate.",1.2370939334638005,3.1497266232876733,3.4291976516634044,89.0513698630137,80.7123287671233,6.36320939334638,21.38747553816047,7.447530270364453,0.7522187866927591,541,16,116,8,14,185,94,146,0.19899999999999998,0.695,0.106,-0.9368,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,8,8,2,0,6,0,15,6,3,5,2,24,27,13,0,1,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,5,1,0,1,6,4,0,0,3,4,16,4,14,23,0,14,0,2,4,4,3,4,1,1,12,77,24,1,0.1846070618229391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122389700280005,0.0,0.18308059993107856,0.12908154995458276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125347514264646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060825342153426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.405564377865386,0.0,0.0,0.15900179184071989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698765637259666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476471315158452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19268181012274194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20291042657227054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705690566314393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423803467422156,0.17829465066800892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11826401093775447,0.0,0.18227720238827053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14710792711601578,0.0,0.19258542678549587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3919974855768269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21133091893468745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14838016350206135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143430273644792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944122907558125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jenny21birthday,2020/02/22,"Struggling writer with self esteem issues. Not sure if the other one worked so I’m posting it again I guess. Sorry. Does anyone have any idea on how I can stop these horrible self deprecating cycles of feeling like an utter failure from coming?


I’m not in one right now. I’m just asking because I want them to stop",2.0664746543778847,4.6626095645161305,3.4707373271889423,85.95467741935484,82.38709677419354,4.833179723502305,20.147465437788018,6.1826913282559595,0.3210755760368662,251,7,45,2,7,82,51,62,0.252,0.6709999999999999,0.077,-0.8993,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,1,5,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,14,10,3,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,1,4,2,6,10,0,9,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,5,27,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170051502244793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456989684915537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948002549957988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702200436900765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17949454638308934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823482685448468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535944866176374,0.14886142877828734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295459136614188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23522730489174434,0.0,0.21748685998770975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180032821836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823973362021196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19956335357695573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17794906390778972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4347561373259787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23325606865320184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484176518018505,0.0,0.21783628655470846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19638871175891648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290355963433515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15169773624161845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ireallyliketofu,2020/02/22,"school and feeling down F(15) I am not exactly sure what to call this feeling. It lingers with me throughout my day, sometimes it would come out of nowhere and it feels like I can't be freed from this-- it feels like I'm suffocating. I feel like I am not exceeding my expectations, I can do better. This pressure on myself makes me lose all hope and I just want to stay in bed and do nothing. I wondered at times if death was a better option, but I don't want to die. A part of me is hopeful and I want to live. I simply cannot end it since I know there's more to life. Everything is hard, I want to give up. Although I'm a freshman in high school, my courses and classes I take aren't regular classes, they're harder classes. I have high goals, I hope I can reach them. Everything feels like it's out of my grasp, I have no control. All I can do is cry and hope that it gets better.",1.1079569892473131,3.021812913978493,2.6507526881720445,94.46279569892474,81.15053763440861,5.638709677419356,23.23655913978495,6.691623216298621,0.49434623655914,686,24,157,7,18,224,103,186,0.092,0.6779999999999999,0.23,0.9689,0,0,0,0,0,1,24.0,0,0,1,6,2,15,0,1,3,0,20,1,0,2,4,42,43,10,2,11,5,0,7,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,12,11,0,1,9,0,0,1,7,2,0,0,1,7,27,13,19,40,4,15,0,1,0,0,3,10,0,7,7,100,39,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938317079637745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130818144616404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539598854028454,0.0,0.0,0.12420860245474785,0.0,0.0,0.1216468779009492,0.07142059745460645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11493459318046476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808614736878724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19905879574306995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335972394471431,0.31646160710678345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057859071248244624,0.1062355560342404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920470369720463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340138363240909,0.0,0.4399743745813529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060861903148356336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822162985142385,0.21641533160320706,0.0,0.09778881535700763,0.0,0.0,0.1238939990158208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392235478264637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626167486959484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992475703029253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22415730115722096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916084260938652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952846227311852,0.0,0.0,0.11803816919044588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437473268079127,0.0,0.08326556476146854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457560764611206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612782795397913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009694064002395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866922700383595,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imagesmaydisturbeyou,2020/02/22,"Am I alone in how I feel? Preface:
I have already been diagnosed with Bipolar Depression, Severe Anxiety, and PTSD.
Ever since I was a little kid, I never wanted to be alive. It is a constant feeling that I have. It is not necessarily a suicide-related thing, just the simple feeling of wishing I was never born. It plagues me every day. I feel tired of struggling to be alive for a life I never wanted to live.
When I was a teenager, I figured that I would not survive past highschool. Not because I hated it, but because I simply had no will to live. I have tried to kill myself before, but it did not work, somehow I stopped myself. I don't know how or why I stopped myself self but I guess I am happy that I did.
I punch myself in the head all of the time. I rarely cut myself but when I do it it is on the surface level on the skin; just enough to leave a scratch.
I don't want to kill myself, but I don't want to be alive. 
I simply wish I was never born.
Am I alone in how I feel?",1.5217391304347814,3.1006274782608725,3.659251207729472,89.31032608695654,78.56521739130434,5.5661835748792265,24.060386473429947,6.139981653823899,0.5851429951690816,756,26,162,5,18,259,99,207,0.16699999999999998,0.696,0.13699999999999998,-0.7942,0,2,0,0,0,5,28.0,0,0,0,2,9,7,4,1,11,0,26,6,2,3,6,41,40,12,2,7,12,0,7,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,11,2,0,2,7,0,0,0,12,6,0,0,8,7,37,1,18,27,2,23,0,1,0,0,2,8,0,3,15,130,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476422026526436,0.13192997328039072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145790141050662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145757090969008,0.0,0.10173100177464693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12919458043287685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710194944272708,0.0,0.1029710304763374,0.12134402207994467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353045557238362,0.0,0.0,0.10814275018195893,0.10072876103534402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022485517238496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317013724721027,0.0,0.0,0.12726664712206828,0.0,0.11803407337062576,0.12269611540707408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645358936695125,0.0,0.0657033341469207,0.0,0.0,0.12658961909317318,0.0,0.0,0.0844439890602344,0.0,0.1198237542982562,0.21113540257100955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688273158156831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141270953636315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975133990456085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472010297024308,0.13506113178536264,0.0,0.09889567560263296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999037238514929,0.0,0.1249830042969018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794258604013339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06971245569778953,0.13740886245120335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116880231659612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820623940084443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787820383273808,0.0,0.274960651862,0.0,0.0,0.08703618263229465,0.0,0.0,0.08492719158507915,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emeraldgreen298,2020/02/22,"HELP! plz I'm feeling completely debilitated by fear and sadness. I probably need professional help, but I can't afford it and I don't want to be a burden on my family. So, I'm doing the next best thing. Anonymously ranting to complete strangers online. 

I have been telling people since age 9 that I want to become a doctor. I would be the first doctor in my family, and all my relatives are looking forward to me becoming a doctor. However, I really messed up in school because I was constantly depressed,  I was sick for a while, and I did poorly on my MCAT, twice! Now i have really mediocre GPA and MCAT, and I'm now not even sure I would get into DO school. If I don't get in this cycle I will be two years behind and would have wasted my gap year. Not to mention the extreme guilt of wasting my parents money who have been supporting me this whole time, upsetting all my relatives, and just the sheer depression that will follow after not attaining my goal of 10+ years. All my friends have already gotten in, and I'm here so embarrassed that I'm probably even going to avoid going to graduation.

Also, My brother is special needs and has many medical conditions. Over the years, I have naturally have felt that I need to conceal my struggles because my parents already have enough to deal with with my brother. I have also felt that I need to be perfect and overcompensate, which I am definitely not and that leads to my undoing any time I mess up. Its shitty and I know it but thats the mindset that I grew up with. 

On top of that, the constant negativity online about medical school, physicians leaving the field and horrible work conditions I saw while working in the hospital is really making re-think medical school. So not only am I scared of not getting in, Im scared that even if I go Im entering a 10 year prison of extreme debt and long hours. I'm not averse to hard work but I don't want to put in all this time and effort just to continue being miserable at the end of it. 

Also, on top of that,  I am getting minor in education and have started my student teaching semester. I thought this would be a good way to enjoy my interest of teaching and be unique for applications. I have NEVER BEEN MORE MISERABLE. I grew up in a good area and took all AP classes in high school. These kids that I am teaching are inner-city many with an unstable family life and are even in actual gangs. They don't listen to me, and one kid started cussing at me in class. I can't control the students and I am being evaluated almost every week with poor results. I have so much anxiety about going everyday and cry every night. I won't let myself quit but I seriously can't take it anymore, and my mental health is seriously fragile as it is. 

I'm so mentally exhausted and tired that every second of my life feels so painfully long and unnecessary.

Nobody probably cares, and I know people deal with much worse everyday, but this is what I'm feeling and I don't know how to make the pain stop.",5.508139823496967,6.046810559523809,6.722463688177978,75.171056260342,67.55442176870747,10.098253355396212,32.55855855855856,10.094168925368589,3.290117521603236,2371,98,443,55,37,803,262,588,0.19699999999999998,0.695,0.10800000000000001,-0.996,5,1,0,0,0,1,56.0,0,0,1,15,21,32,0,10,20,0,58,15,0,6,8,89,103,48,0,14,16,4,7,0,1,7,15,1,0,2,29,35,0,3,9,0,4,12,18,21,0,5,12,10,62,11,64,75,11,72,0,5,2,0,16,29,0,3,32,314,91,25,0.0,0.0,0.061282292799722186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288364252515953,0.0,0.13859944793156212,0.150659851617458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042705144317932764,0.0,0.04804069283609694,0.0,0.0622792533855861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656278493091177,0.13871205413782087,0.0,0.0,0.0659031681583966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640272723412959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13168609842240106,0.13572577238146089,0.0704338755355607,0.0,0.0,0.06898122101073115,0.0,0.12948502499953402,0.10817653958462284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19283082631344106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05562084556947485,0.06488765410676972,0.0,0.16591131014631927,0.0,0.15873137456782915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760255581787374,0.07066578950197698,0.0952584496883232,0.0,0.12059284692259728,0.0,0.0,0.05341638561027661,0.0,0.0,0.04851797766617268,0.0,0.13123853074143416,0.0,0.1427593752907351,0.10534483149392512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056255135430710236,0.0,0.0,0.06675188589365026,0.0,0.0,0.08418504304834018,0.06635008000856889,0.0,0.0,0.061843888440625765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13566634707143985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353726617535468,0.0,0.0,0.0664945610308418,0.0,0.06421573731716748,0.08871289801607922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111494209730107,0.05273493721114491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383699410760824,0.12733567716978214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18978869432672127,0.12657226747452896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232826986742113,0.18625721552241395,0.04843408692796616,0.0,0.06678693417626698,0.0589321531572428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04255389966508167,0.04776110121080122,0.1336440972504214,0.0,0.13946064058057595,0.0,0.0,0.08707316781719737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031222648364591,0.0,0.0,0.06312985362442079,0.0,0.06679395176476041,0.0,0.0,0.12069101215029122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12574453956739556,0.31777725411263164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05194758135898559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889822566287679,0.0,0.0,0.05250237128903917,0.0,0.06565064391987324,0.0,0.0,0.07126301173578659,0.05918685811938512,0.0,0.04721666864373665,0.0,0.054888670921434936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04172054359367637,0.04023875334578439,0.0,0.04985500702425229,0.10985495903723376,0.07217765608185507,0.0,0.0,0.06977146190865705,0.0,0.0,0.061345025129275574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112057533186373,0.049846538953046984,0.05037318156948629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011230042517583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13715420267616682,0.0,0.06399705280892763,0.17844105589339232,0.0,0.0,0.20220092679814766
mentalhealth,InitialWasabi,2020/02/22,"Psychotic Break / Mania from Wellbutrin ? Hello, 

First of all, thank you for this support group.  

Community is so important because suffering alone is hard.  

Apologies if this is kind of a mess.  I'm trying my best to keep it together right now.  

  
I've been on Wellbutrin XL 450mg a day for the past few months as a treatment for depression / ADHD.  It has been useful in some ways.  It gives an energy boost that overcomes some of the inattentive / depressive issues.  However, there are some problems that seem to have arisen.  

Early on, I was having a ton of nightmares and my energy was very manic.  Spoke to my psych about that , they said be patient.  That faded and things got better.  However the past two weeks I've been having these episodes.  There were some thought loops that were kind of concerning but I figured it would pass.  Everything is rushing by so fast but not in a clear ""Limitless"" way.  Right now it feels like all the sounds of the past hour are going at once in my brain.  Constantly shaking my feet , hands, etc.  It almost felt like a panic attack at first, but there are these layers of thoughts on different textures of thoughts, if that makes any sense.  My heart might be beating fast, but I am having trouble keeping track of time.  I've been drinking chamomile tea and trying to meditate but there's so much intense stuff inside I can't sit still.  It's really late at night but I feel beyond awake.  I feel like screaming.  Not in an angry way , but everything is too much.  

I just moved to a new country , got a new job, and new housemates.  Some of the stuff that I've gone through in the past wasn't so good, but my friends kind of knew that things weren't stable.  My housemates are wonderful.  There is no context for them to work with.  They are empathetic people, but this would be difficult for anyone to have to deal with.  Over the years, I've lived with people who had schizophrenic breaks.  It was heartbreaking but unreal how intense.  This isn't the same, but it's got shades of those episodes.  

This is not the first time that I've gone to live in a new country , etc.  It's stressful and there's anxiety but this feels different.  It's almost like a bad acid trip or something.  Right now it's an acute episode, but day to day I've been feeling like something isn't right.  

This is kind of a bit much as is, but especially now it's not welcome.  I was really trying to build up confidence and try to go on a date again, but I feel like I'm losing my grip on reality.  It feels like the walls are closing in on me. 

I have an appointment with a new psych and counselor in two weeks.  Until then I'm going to do my best.  

​

Has anyone experienced anything like this?   Any  ideas about what worked for you if you had an episode like this?  Do you think Wellbutrin just exposes stuff that was subconscious and makes it easier to try and process it as opposed to repressing things?  

I've read up on Wellbutrin and like anything there are side effects.  They seem to effect everyone with different severity or not at all.  Some people seem to feel perfectly adjusted with it.  Very, very happy for those who have found solace in things!  

Peace!",3.4471735537190087,5.69944184958678,3.7571900826446303,87.71760330578516,75.13223140495867,7.24297520661157,25.54545454545455,8.180337850089996,1.5992247933884298,2489,88,486,43,55,772,261,605,0.11199999999999999,0.736,0.152,0.9836,6,1,3,0,0,0,79.0,0,4,4,13,24,40,1,4,29,0,53,7,4,6,5,94,93,40,0,6,27,0,12,10,1,3,1,4,0,0,50,17,2,4,24,2,0,10,11,16,0,5,29,18,29,24,76,58,20,85,0,5,0,0,19,31,0,18,48,319,79,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805269971851549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11340427199827904,0.05864681371973225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061353572811179466,0.06880603156034365,0.07701439686829469,0.0,0.043318258760144016,0.0,0.0,0.07918756103978931,0.0,0.09319572169595276,0.0,0.0,0.06441954155631734,0.0,0.0,0.04727982492864668,0.03451830451685828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188496802549714,0.05008054474361727,0.06182024633317295,0.0,0.0,0.06321264837288443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061191916491500416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955605186741924,0.05837827774081328,0.0975427092504932,0.0,0.0,0.1774844020196614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05547131239640818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263045282025568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05410797478242338,0.10178247605650263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22905193793477335,0.2022659048292137,0.054369242398710584,0.0,0.0,0.14449655140021014,0.0,0.06208680364042336,0.04374862615392935,0.0,0.0,0.05432022181205606,0.09654452081455972,0.047494680033723334,0.13586546152460846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06027876724204353,0.050725215839173485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710134492093127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05576459047633834,0.0,0.0,0.06392315867843623,0.0,0.059102182324740585,0.0561919496818225,0.10066247451616556,0.0,0.235866467472748,0.0,0.0,0.06387589219345145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766429916464814,0.0,0.10000249142987093,0.0,0.0,0.06334931315794999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559575830466099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060070577042149416,0.0,0.0,0.045197836044404166,0.060183814846579024,0.12487850347949815,0.0,0.0,0.2734457119899887,0.0,0.05313908083023574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06030417893375565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643767982053045,0.0,0.0,0.21622132029097635,0.11777072077538896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054182838797094166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566407010831157,0.0,0.07255133354254596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19343105179208397,0.05386370103761082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464885079498986,0.0,0.0639705587476353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718596405605457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04522109957897984,0.0,0.06486417855384331,0.0,0.19446752903831085,0.0,0.06425780729120696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05213303969821505,0.0,0.0,0.15047753862923452,0.036283255438576544,0.0,0.1348626737420395,0.06603742592272094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922245715118367,0.0,0.11062953156249253,0.0,0.0,0.04890614523967207,0.0,0.14016560006098047,0.0,0.13483976678058565,0.09084292440341947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06140780636958122,0.08244789837978435,0.0,0.0,0.08045008696060361,0.0,0.06880603156034365,0.03646488654302566
mentalhealth,snappyshags,2020/02/22,"Are “harmless” thoughts of dying just as bad? I wouldn’t *exactly* say I’m suicidal lately. I don’t WANT to kill myself, but usually the thought of dying is cathartic to me. 

I’ll be having a shitty time but somehow thinking of all the ways in which I could die and how relieving that would be, becomes like a distraction from all the downward spiral. 

Spontaneously combusting, a bullet to my head, being hit by a car, even getting some immediate health issue that results in my death, are some of the thoughts I *continue* to entertain once or gets in my brain instead of stopping it. 

Obviously, I’m feeling terrible, tortured even, when thoughts of dying surface in my mind, but dwelling a bit on the actual dying part eases the pain a little. 

Does anyone else get a slight cathartic effect from it? I assume me taking relief in thinking about dying is how people who cut feel - inflicting physical pain to block out the actual mental one? A distraction?

I mean I know I need to get back into therapy again. I will not kill my self even though my situation is still shitty. I’m just wondering if this is “harmless” in the sense that it has the same effect as daydreaming?",5.291227272727274,6.822947804545457,6.2388636363636385,74.82329545454544,68.68181818181819,9.318181818181818,31.931818181818183,9.673873057562805,3.280772727272728,927,40,158,21,16,307,133,220,0.261,0.644,0.095,-0.9946,0,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,2,15,17,4,3,17,0,16,5,2,5,4,44,38,12,10,6,8,0,2,1,0,3,3,1,0,1,9,3,0,2,14,1,0,1,3,11,0,1,4,3,18,6,27,26,7,23,0,0,0,0,3,12,0,7,10,115,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.1884019004453812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749716317595966,0.09890806692274323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422686823573435,0.08059988251276391,0.0,0.10661160598076756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053875431832418,0.0,0.0,0.10776122880878394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707265513924214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6011075761528327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447548369252003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080639793790205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912747021340108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976185895079205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017351789052013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906930617059513,0.10260861323985866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075394650490294,0.0,0.0,0.2135959020064129,0.0,0.05305126169181812,0.0,0.1088918881142212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716048051856474,0.09675005734044362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10515124897273004,0.0,0.0,0.09728118289330087,0.0,0.09746943256894593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157698368672741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280304007945752,0.06541233366108487,0.0,0.20543292976630328,0.0,0.0,0.10453435300952417,0.0,0.0669228807584446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676583009271756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007035473437228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085056014719098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709028784824018,0.08070476867657958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055899402076916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257977548467433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039233663921,0.0,0.0,0.12370714696779565,0.0948418405834284,0.3065413397890863,0.05628837224809295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631595729662437,0.0,0.0569368589594779,0.07662231813086914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468443963623776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857330337995284,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kenneytheheel,2020/02/22,"“All I want is to be... Happy?” Does it make sense to say “All I want is to be happy.”? When I never truly been happy before? How would I know that “happiness” is what I want & need? It’s like someone who’s craving chocolate ice cream, but they’ve never had ice cream before. How does someone know that being happy will be enough? I don’t know... maybe I’m thinking too deep.",-0.14688311688311728,2.119776974025978,1.8181948051948067,95.74157792207797,90.94805194805195,3.59948051948052,15.492207792207791,4.935628992294339,-0.9161314285714286,285,6,61,1,10,94,47,77,0.102,0.755,0.14300000000000002,-0.4232,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,12,0,0,3,4,17,22,4,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,6,6,3,14,3,4,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,4,37,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109576718793194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237326107475274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440700970341872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14409079663141275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7422441892348743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299168827971083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812901538534902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308503624026072,0.0,0.14009789139270878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340160594653616,0.21510736566565533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108975218646693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363138026386144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935496443604808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467565277573917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906242662557146,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RectangularMF,2020/02/22,"Need advice for a friend My friend has asked me for some mental advice but I'm not equipped to help him at all, if anyone can help me with advice please do so, he said something like this, ""I haven't  been able to think properly for the last 2 weeks, it's been like a permanent mind block, I can't think straight about everything"" all help is appreciated",4.244647887323944,5.3037295211267645,4.4071549295774695,88.75721126760563,70.69014084507046,7.933521126760564,24.059154929577463,8.238735603445708,1.0586766197183093,280,7,61,4,5,87,54,71,0.171,0.615,0.214,0.5559,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,2,12,14,3,0,2,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,6,4,8,11,3,4,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,2,4,34,8,0,0.1910819255562211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5601691384633196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133608925224974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178635806231177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17173211365624538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952588433710517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842345605986369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15575727269319176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18670595381178912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192565638012138,0.0,0.19293827347788808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416848266096507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20975057343541867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18176266852462836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14710420171142144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448751646928765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327439479712926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,666Groovy,2020/02/22,"Murder charge pending 
This guy I owe like 35 bucks to is sending threats and shit to my family. I have a one year old daughter and a fiancé. This guy I owe money too has sold me an ounce of hemp flower to me trying to fuck me over. But since he was my friend I let it go. But now he’s getting all obsessed over 35 bucks. The money was for drugs, and now he’s going around telling people I’ll steal from them, snitch on them etc. blatant lies. I get money is money, but this dude has fucked us over big time, and since he was our friend, we let it go. But now he’s talking about coming to my girls work and threatening to call children services on us. That’s shit made me snap bro. Once he started bringing my family into it. I told him to come to my house and see what happens. Sent him the address and no show🤷‍♀️ then he threatens to come to where my girl works. I said do it man, I fucking dare you. He was telling me he was gonna beat my ass and shit. I told him “bro there will be no fighting, you brought my family into this. I told him he was gonna die. I told him I’d slice his neck ear to ear in one swift motion” I feel like I won’t have any remorse. My two girls mean everything to me. I’m curious as too if this is some psychotic behavior. I woke up today ready to go to prison for my family. This guy is obviously a chump because he won’t meet me, just talk mad shit. But I’m not with all the shit talking, tussling. I will die for my family, I will risk everything on my family. If you wanna try to break that from me, you will die. Simple as that. I’m just curious as to what you guys think of my behavior. Nothing has happened yet but I’m waiting for it man. When I see him, I’m putting a knife in his neck. If he wants to pull out his strap, I got my glock with me at all times. I don’t miss tho. If I’m taking a shot, I’m making it count. Can anyone relate? Comments? Concerns? Really looking to chat with somebody about this violent thinking.",0.44712705935454977,2.2937676824644555,2.477386594448209,95.1968562401264,83.07582938388626,5.630422026630559,20.237192507334687,6.7636006534598385,0.14747375310313693,1510,43,356,17,42,506,205,422,0.217,0.7340000000000001,0.049,-0.9979,3,0,1,0,2,0,50.0,4,5,2,3,15,21,13,2,9,0,27,14,10,2,5,47,77,24,4,6,13,3,1,2,2,8,1,3,1,10,18,19,0,1,4,1,9,14,6,17,0,3,17,7,62,4,49,49,5,43,0,1,3,4,64,16,9,5,14,207,80,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05027825724586605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051696990777451865,0.0,0.0,0.0658177229007066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04507001975637675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549578416682097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19106507077654586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23019821395766102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574099401619259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824569407606465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328958148706036,0.0,0.4181953781706174,0.0,0.03738369943298786,0.052819096733108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424381774655006,0.205054829886094,0.07725585189530088,0.0,0.16807559627219554,0.0,0.059132481744893085,0.0,0.0,0.2928286413485635,0.13076074955130199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531093079003538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151206858641137,0.0,0.07224170059036783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062086682560001376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995897601166443,0.04935210995988186,0.0,0.0,0.08053676469645914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709425163484723,0.0,0.07758222479186798,0.07873823972463813,0.10020038327220053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05125714010158667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432498054080211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047364580646147535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032900670805152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178330621856114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794654857332169,0.1223194020571836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05233149225891124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055589832332348064,0.1782781802702671,0.12924469688832013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474897810485776,0.0,0.0,0.0862240522139119,0.0,0.0700816261550115,0.2825918047313539,0.0,0.10039386762427298,0.0,0.07222363964494709,0.0,0.17786912697680318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04360871085577082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765095391732853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047611641994338184
mentalhealth,ai___________d,2020/02/22,"I feel trapped 
So this might be me overreacting but I feel like I’m trapped because a couple of days ago I went to a doctor to talk about the possibility of me having inattentive ADHD. While there I described my symptoms and while there was a possibility that I have it, they can’t diagnose me because I get good grades at school. It’s not that my ADHD switches of at school, I still have the symptoms at school but since I get good grades they really can’t do anything. This may sound petty as I know there are people out there who struggle with school because of ADHD and I’m thankful that I don’t have to endure that but I still am very frustrated with my school time because I constantly forget work, have a hard time concentrating on assignments and rushing through the and daydream but since I still get good grades I guess I’m just fine. It’s just frustrating and I feel like I’m trapped. Has anyone dealt with this and if so what did you do.",4.803833943833944,5.839047698412702,5.1265608465608485,84.20227106227107,69.37037037037037,8.143426943426944,28.824175824175825,8.384062270229773,1.870433943833944,761,27,154,11,13,241,93,189,0.147,0.726,0.127,-0.4748,0,3,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,2,1,12,10,2,1,7,0,18,4,0,0,0,26,32,16,0,1,8,0,4,2,0,2,4,1,0,0,12,10,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,3,5,24,7,18,26,0,17,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,4,12,104,36,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724509523039241,0.0,0.09157201392972254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223196787658126,0.0,0.0850096945452631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518905777904121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111634011409938,0.0,0.0,0.11430297612253985,0.0,0.06662198890215626,0.0,0.0,0.10485052778539897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573515644649373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15669953720376562,0.14759958911031792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16191490438201325,0.0,0.0,0.25993735562437303,0.0,0.0,0.1138000717057464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253933605018576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05677271236341898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093740695384927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10958832256636908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716174005794951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23291757130034704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617864630551143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5227415396351631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709068746015048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474940990157243,0.0,0.0,0.10799488709959952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147430641814496,0.0,0.083031162915024,0.0,0.09510766588449088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047380081589605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523592163605308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576305961194168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752059271565117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ickda,2020/02/22,"That feel when you ask for support, so that you can be better, clean up more, and all your mother wants to be is a defitest, and ague, Making everything about her, when you just want some support, and help with motivation. >_> I have aspergers and a bunch of other stuff, like Bipolar. Need to increase my productivity with hose work. I like to cook and clean, I just never seem able or willing to do it, no matter how much I want to.   


 All my mom wishes on the matter is to be a pity party.",5.047993197278913,5.247150602040815,5.710612244897959,83.21176870748302,68.48979591836735,8.165986394557821,27.55782312925169,7.793537801064563,1.4655251700680267,381,11,79,4,6,124,68,98,0.039,0.648,0.313,0.9744,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,4,0,3,7,6,0,0,4,0,9,2,0,3,3,26,20,10,0,5,3,2,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,5,7,1,0,3,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,11,5,13,16,7,6,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,3,5,62,16,2,0.21874196082034267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20449420537283394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934594884686962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19659116982226812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060250785129584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661812545523312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137325459471927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14601195740674147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561879407887056,0.0,0.0,0.16080050997554332,0.16219439227896265,0.16870728519878614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19913446575734065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504072115836811,0.0,0.4964515698588248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870590277018597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515424596984479,0.0,0.0,0.15924675268138916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InterestingDead,2020/02/22,"I have a voice! Hi guys! I decided to share a little something that made me feel very good yesterday. I commented on a reddit post, after hearing the story and relating to it. I was very hesitant because I usually feel like nobody cares about what I have to say and I have this inner critic voice basically telling me that what I feel and think doesn't matter and I shouldn't express it. I keep my opinions to myself for this reason and rarely share anything I feel like has no value. Usually when I share something with other people I feel like they only tolerate it/me to be nice. I always feel like if I express myself I will get ridiculed or make everything awkward. 

But after writing that comment yesterday, I got some upvotes ( 10 I think) and I felt so good! 10 people actually read what I had to say and thought it was valuable! Wow! That was so big to me. I still don't really have the confidence to share myself in this way very often, but seeing that people that don't know me and have no intention to flatter me actually care what I have to say made me feel really good. 

I've been dealing with depressed mood and suicidal thoughts for a bit and that makes me shut down even more. Just a few days ago I felt like giving up on everything and stop trying. But maybe I shouldn't do that, as I have a voice and people care to hear it. 

Thank you for reading!",3.723340361975048,5.252283808118083,4.856879283078545,83.22596555965563,72.54243542435424,7.9663328061852035,26.92690212616413,8.563005593585519,1.9240415041293264,1076,38,210,19,21,354,134,271,0.09,0.713,0.19699999999999998,0.975,0,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,1,0,8,24,1,1,8,0,21,0,0,6,0,50,50,21,1,3,6,0,9,5,0,3,0,8,0,1,20,14,0,2,16,2,0,0,7,3,0,0,12,18,38,20,25,34,4,22,0,1,1,0,22,9,0,5,16,141,58,2,0.0,0.0,0.17759197379761482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065975415157776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757134182273477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487943934250457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05546845374959821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934072726097133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783201105691916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586829208546309,0.0938097291906684,0.07837208884389225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06009998096131663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355718059391974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32206136361542803,0.26002150787355105,0.17473499058568806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0475400573474788,0.08728872270590261,0.0,0.2289616914569992,0.07277536922538164,0.0,0.0,0.09009731988692088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051113208249604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087870899471739,0.0,0.0,0.05000734203864952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22227277964650705,0.0911988340218626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17219944638356732,0.12147699262401493,0.0,0.09141464195934472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920423377837694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25233219958012304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714608703418432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820351348276229,0.0,0.11658481913881273,0.09355590070044137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21708372241707305,0.0,0.0,0.07250959501844201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010162673243476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266708216440866,0.07607417510264855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953151136122633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953184323506222,0.08377407702380406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660920803318285,0.0,0.14447646614767412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617782356560026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20043174360615465,0.2252361236476746,0.0,0.07222596312267412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vkreardon,2020/02/22,"Mental Health Month, Depression Prevention/Mitigation, Resilience Building Happy New Moon. I recently moved, separating from my partner of 10 years. I have been taking the last month to adjust and do my best to support my mental health. I made a video with researched and implemented tools I used to do so. I hope these might help a few others who are in a time where they need a little extra resilience. 

[https://youtu.be/RKqyzFGkOWg](https://youtu.be/RKqyzFGkOWg)",7.508783783783784,11.353315486486487,5.079662162162162,75.119222972973,69.81081081081078,7.483783783783783,26.817567567567572,8.472884824447931,2.4384918918918923,382,13,53,7,8,107,57,74,0.047,0.737,0.21600000000000005,0.9237,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,1,2,5,0,0,5,0,6,2,0,2,0,9,12,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,9,4,7,9,3,11,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,2,7,37,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20513068826596045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835554829389773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20807838919981947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4155448267222873,0.0,0.0,0.13101749358012715,0.0,0.0,0.19414295956650252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15933179547938947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19590941025060374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18495571981982747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3939697751712011,0.20735973015247688,0.0,0.0,0.31203998853107034,0.20775061969817088,0.0,0.1449363963913859,0.0,0.188783367304131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19300020455301628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22181377699676855,0.0,0.0,0.14696695177440375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139784524601066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168820836739766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587441982281866
mentalhealth,milktan,2020/02/22,"Do any of you experience this? I had one of my crying-so-hard-it-turns-into-manic-laughter moments yesterday and was very near one again today. I can never find much info on it, so I was wondering, do any of you experience this too? I don't get them often at all and have only had one (or two at most) before in the past 5 years. But with how divided my emotions seem to be between my ""good"" and ""bad"" moods lately I'm kinda scared it's gonna happen more cause it has some nasty consequences. 

Is it a sign of anything? My body tenses up like crazy too during those times, caused some vomiting before too. I guess I don't handle stress that well. But yeah, just curious, have you guys ever cried so intensely that you've had some uncontrollable laughter mixed in? If so, what happened? What do you do to get back down to earth from those moods?",2.5416765285996057,4.466253739644977,3.885656804733731,87.27152268244578,76.69230769230771,6.873530571992112,21.325838264299804,7.793537801064563,0.8463014595660754,658,17,135,10,15,216,113,169,0.099,0.813,0.08800000000000001,-0.4469,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,4,1,0,13,9,0,3,2,1,17,2,1,3,3,27,26,11,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,12,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,4,1,4,5,0,15,3,18,19,7,19,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,11,12,96,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033716166336666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230507889132734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149796574776878,0.12485164879417587,0.0,0.0,0.2544787357062132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660945793965075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072178479763966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642521370478738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16820158815086214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525881915062504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29253887269996504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136668088322648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15624693809022475,0.0,0.0,0.12541901582992845,0.0,0.0,0.16472460790131685,0.14805861780490126,0.2644585004054093,0.0,0.13394987909788209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686768187189164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305300661866318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992205859401613,0.0,0.11532707260492445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30397703276184945,0.11372461702893745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274369873155696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497060289990562,0.0,0.0,0.1361268718388748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17128658264596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719238619239701,0.0,0.14173734719726003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14606948568178493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337825064742232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444579898321068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215935413564495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962926832927176
mentalhealth,ReturningTheSmile,2020/02/22,Serious question. Can you overdose on Xanax alone?,4.708749999999998,6.936612375000003,3.6700000000000017,75.87500000000001,112.75,6.6000000000000005,41.5,7.1686216300943375,5.0325500000000005,41,3,5,1,2,12,8,8,0.355,0.645,0.0,-0.3182,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6788606550622048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7342671251040144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NumbCargo0,2020/02/22,"Mental illness Sucks First things first, I was diagnosed with bipolar 2 months after my high school graduation. That was two years ago, I am now in my second year of college. During these two years I have tried several medications and none of them seem to work (I eventually told my psychiatrist I was feeling better because I was tired of constantly having to go through symptom phases of a med just to get off it in two weeks, go through withdrawal, and start the cycle again) and I have attended counseling regularly (twice a month). I have awful thoughts that keep me up all hours of the day. The only way I can sleep is if I smoke enough weed so that I can't think.

 I've hurt myself, I've tried to kill myself (Xanax overdose, a friend found me unresponsive and sent me to the hospital), I've been to psychiatric hospitals. The worst thing is I really cant talk to anyone about how I feel. I don't want to talk about it to my S/O because I don't want her to worry more than she already does about me. I cant talk to my parents because last time I did they threatened to call the cops on me and get me taken back to a psych hospital (I will never go back to one, I would rather do the job and do it right before ever stepping foot into one again). I don't want to talk to my friends because mental health is a serious burden and they shouldn't have to worry about me either. That being said, there is nothing wrong with having a solid group of friends as a support group. Sadly, all my close friends are hours away at other universities. I talk to my therapist to an extent, but I don't say everything (I'm afraid he would send me back to the hospital too. I mean it kinda is his job). 

I wish things got better like everyone says it does. They tell me to have some hope and one day things will get better. I've learned to hate the word ""hope"" because hoping for things only led me to disappointment. 

This isn't a post saying I'm going to kill myself today or anything, I'm just venting after my night of not sleeping and having panic attacks.",4.961469043151972,5.426441563414635,5.756097560975611,81.88093808630396,68.73170731707317,8.649155722326455,28.208255159474678,8.617729084823388,1.9235422138836773,1611,51,324,24,26,528,213,410,0.12300000000000001,0.778,0.099,-0.8798,3,0,1,0,0,4,43.0,0,0,4,6,18,26,5,2,18,1,38,11,3,2,4,49,72,15,2,12,8,1,2,1,4,5,8,4,0,0,17,13,0,1,8,0,0,9,12,14,0,10,13,6,53,12,52,53,9,51,0,3,0,0,29,11,1,8,30,224,70,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403847933094653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972122330821517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05051352682324979,0.0,0.05944929387754708,0.0,0.0,0.08218609583672938,0.06787406050279153,0.16664971044147678,0.0,0.2201913126519074,0.0,0.061472914063346526,0.0,0.0,0.19167744835266887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376751066555906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806830957974131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318067117256007,0.0,0.0,0.07332445873230617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264395245852032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464565321423662,0.0,0.0,0.06534733633347813,0.0,0.06903065581601447,0.06492676080569693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305579979267098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228986022413978,0.0,0.07921000166893669,0.22325702387489188,0.0,0.11323092954575972,0.0,0.16422795626882578,0.0,0.05777880216673637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132435857588801,0.0,0.07679023374176602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632800308833737,0.0,0.21525884504960974,0.14228831396378874,0.0,0.07733692367971923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337875899863656,0.06421231491158143,0.15985090065503735,0.0,0.0,0.05888715262738396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03529396030262125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869309146571697,0.08024495859973657,0.07277656155968794,0.14560658286238728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11532629990887926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05571774949089983,0.0,0.0,0.06779454625536964,0.0,0.0693184777021953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685984634702826,0.10988711634559067,0.0,0.08476082550395911,0.08021657399328666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691881961705969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04628029560251865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169456727073136,0.06871901271957905,0.17235003524764325,0.0,0.07311310922362063,0.0,0.06576671697963822,0.0,0.08161328604560213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14458903362977008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051133503095003495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819797561532837,0.0,0.0750874567834764,0.0,0.2903282991154331,0.06314299309156755,0.0,0.0,0.08387892976154791,0.2399730173538588,0.046289977182412186,0.0,0.057352351792564,0.04212509189428889,0.08303194744623213,0.06847729528083428,0.06903065581601447,0.0,0.09809561927810267,0.0,0.2117108193501849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783121913361595,0.057342610267534525,0.05794845097260735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307513062810952,0.0,0.0,0.05259328702187404,0.14673121464135086,0.0,0.10263777725330586,0.07898566265275175,0.0,0.13956510343125889
mentalhealth,PrivateAccS0HelpMe,2020/02/22,"I’m crying for help I don’t know what to do. I have no friends who can help me. I’ve been trapped in a depression slump for so long I can’t remember when I was feeling okay. My house is such a mess because all I do is sleep. I’m desperate for someone who can be my friend, without judgement, who can help me in all areas of my life. To help me clean and to help me do something with my time. 

This is my cry for help. Anyone. Please",-0.2197894736842088,1.6332773894736867,1.778157894736843,99.23460526315789,85.63157894736842,5.063157894736842,21.07894736842105,6.2581,-0.030705263157894788,332,11,83,3,10,110,57,95,0.17600000000000002,0.556,0.268,0.8225,0,1,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,1,15,2,1,0,2,8,19,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,1,14,3,12,16,2,6,0,1,0,0,11,3,0,0,3,55,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951074687384182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419081733191908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754936450729881,0.0,0.0,0.14721254047421609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.086421932359209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641036505081125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6873816136843259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19721792123472404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393277597253144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12072535449852267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125819975850788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18761806253792032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19361824532589345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710427333585767,0.0,0.14481936610582705,0.13158202556610438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996644168606835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647601035071769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,softservecon,2020/02/22,"I was unfit for work Graduated as a registered nurse in 2017. 

2018 I worked as a registered nurse. 

Start of 2019, i resigned because I was suicidal. Have had multiple car accidents and overdoses. So I was in psychiatry and psychology all throughout 2019. 

It's now 2020 and i want to get back into practice but employers will ask me where I have been and why I have to be monitored/supervised for medication administration.
 
Should the gap be mentioned in my resume? To keep it real, or to not keep it real? What do I say without going into all this detail? And will I be able to find work again due to what has happened in 2019?",2.1985360094451,4.8784040661157055,4.359226682408502,79.20299586776859,82.71900826446281,8.085242030696577,25.99822904368359,8.841846274778883,2.5736394332939803,496,21,92,14,14,170,78,121,0.062,0.9279999999999999,0.01,-0.6917,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,0,3,0,16,1,0,0,2,20,24,10,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,6,7,0,2,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,5,1,12,0,18,13,2,14,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,1,5,70,18,5,0.2058529591231242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924447286732693,0.0,0.0,0.15828821902083415,0.0,0.1254860532233682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18814587529774096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754967487426877,0.0,0.11699098055297608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820350919127412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659431368815443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20737519948686367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4686114688604607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16370253542749386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570378398671327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22516972599344529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141740875708144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857502772290471,0.0,0.0,0.19843490671471484,0.0,0.4495902178156344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dazzling_Work,2020/02/22,"What kind of mental illness is this? Hi guys, I have just posted the same question in r/mentalillness but I figured I would get some responses here as well. I am really desperate and frustrated... Ok here it goes:

​

I think my mother suffers from mental illnesses. A couple of years ago she was diagnosed with bipolar disease. However, something different, something peculiar stood out to me again this morning.

Yesterday she had too much to drink. While she was drunk, she told me yet again that she wants me to go to a particular school to study although I am on a different career path at the moment. She has been telling me to apply since many years, so yesterday I finally had enough and told her ""yes, ok, mom, I will apply to that school tomorrow"". (I told her no many times but she would go on and on for years so I gave in, I have no strength to argue anymore).

Now the kicker: This morning she swears up and down, even on the life of my child, that it was MY idea to apply and that she was surprised that I wanted to get in to that particular school.

Guys.... I am baffled. I KNOW that she was the one who kept going on and on about me applying. Now she claims the exact opposite happened.

This is not the first time that this happened. I KNOW that something took place in a certain way, but then she comes along and swears that it happened differently. She is not faking it, she really is convinced that she is right. When I try to prove her wrong, she gets extremely aggressive and accuses me of gaslighting her! I am so exhausted... I am starting to believe I AM the crazy one.

Is that a mental illness and if yes, how is it called?",3.310741239892181,5.3907821540880505,4.164442946990118,85.43391509433964,74.94339622641509,7.687511230907456,27.08041329739443,8.527137837955566,2.0034111410601985,1287,50,251,25,28,413,158,318,0.124,0.7809999999999999,0.095,-0.9218,4,0,4,0,0,0,55.0,0,0,0,2,17,16,3,0,13,4,27,9,0,1,3,37,50,22,0,5,7,2,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,3,24,13,2,1,7,2,0,5,4,8,1,3,15,0,48,8,37,32,4,44,0,1,0,0,35,16,0,3,21,192,72,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593606502960181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050400770574748,0.11779902173522015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614358237074157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922403548263264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899188206619193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350970040696545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726801309275703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839733110018996,0.0,0.3038612815918695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496938257418427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100170300354022,0.0,0.06403138624082343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619872124357783,0.0,0.08246153238339103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15194958759903526,0.0,0.16528856334166891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919819672706954,0.2571849443248405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943932367238862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095350108974176,0.10655708643284688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847525744207217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19657442087352492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930938610113137,0.0,0.0,0.11354103937987152,0.0,0.0,0.07126587215318878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13138514465855616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012870938639565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284669760301413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10860080408699206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12421114723644865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279066586749241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29434113556727576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019406617524318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22389943966986428,0.0,0.0,0.06861830719706155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473437247686817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062118565758075464,0.0,0.0,0.11305904431919167,0.0,0.0,0.2779058617202832,0.10770967746852504,0.06581942298970493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436157421861265,0.07695058246857223,0.0,0.0,0.08716537194102728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773416846691866,0.1059943507879786,0.11779902173522015,0.1872885791423819
mentalhealth,AndroidHawkeye,2020/02/22,"Un/confirmed Psychological condition/s (Thanks in Advance. Mods: I have nothing in particular to attach to this, so if my exceptionally exhausted brain is reading the disclaimer wrong, I will pull case studies once I get a break. (Sunrise: Time for another 100 lines of boring ass code.... I will try to make this as succinct as possible, but doubt it'll work. In '98, My teacher called my mom one day to say that, ""Something wasn't right,"" and, ""gave her a sense that things were about to take a left turn, and lo and behold... I came down for breakfast one spring morning, and I was freaking the absolute hell out. To this day, it remains a mystery as to what spurred it, but it resembled a psychotic break. Within mere minutes of sitting down at the breakfast table, I experienced an impending sense of doom (aura), then my upper body became completely flaccid; my legs thrashing and nigh rhythmically pounding as I fell over.  
  The episode only lasted for a few minutes, I'm supposing it was frontal and temporal involvement, given the fact that I was hysterically crying though not scared. I had hemiparesis of the left side of my body, vomiting, mild disorientation (to what degree specifically, I cannot say, but I do know I never lost consciousness), arm-drop was positive, though I was alert and semi-oriented, which I would consider quite good for being postictal after an isolated event. In literally one day, I went from naught but perfect attendance, grades, and a plethora of friends, to being a social pariah, who would sneak into the teacher's section of the library, because, let's face it: Those bullshit ""Don't read ahead because we have to take a test on some fable that has zero impact on life"" just wasn't cutting it.  
  Fast forward: Significant TBI, FLE+TLE=Increase in seizures, but also I seem to demonstrate Aspie-like symptoms minus, as opposed to one or two subjects of extreme interest, I have a VAST array of scientific interests that are already about 10 years beyond dabbling.  
  MDII symptoms, I know for a fact I have PTSD since I have been good at BSing psych evals, and have seen some shit working 911 and in S.A. and Trashcanistan. I am neuroleptic intolerant, I only respond to gabapentin, lamotrigine, alprazolam, and pot. Though my prior training kicks in sometimes, it seems I can no longer trust myself because I am developing paranoia from having been in precarious situations where I KNEW I was made/and or followed. I have ""the nightmares"" (ask anyone who has been in Contracting or ex-Military: Waking up with my pillow in a rear-naked choke... hell, I stabbed my mattress to shit once. I am sometimes very verbally explosive over petty shit, I ""act weird"", I go through phases of almost hermetic withdrawal from people, hypomanic states (This is day 4 with +/-12hrs sleep, and a WHOLE LOT of Python programming + obsessively burning through notebooks full of linear algebra/Set Theory, (I'll be here all night were I to go into my extracurriculum). I don't hear voices, I don't see shit, I can't keep a job because nobody wants to pay me, and take all into consideration, when they could easily hire some schmuck for $5/hr less.  


AMA, just \*PLEASE\* keep it civil. I know this is Reddit, and I know people LOOOOVE to be condescending to each other for shits and giggles, but I will trust you guys won't do that. Otherwise, I wouldn't be doing some sort of trust fall with such personal info.   
Main point: I want to know what the general consensus is regarding a dx, because it has been ginuea pig medicine for 5 years, and I am so sick of that. As I said, I have an intolerance to Neuroleptics. I shall also include any manner of SSRI, Valproate, carbemazepine, oxcarb... Hell, I'm on 2.4g of Gabapentin x3, Lamotrigine 100mg x2, and Alprazolam 2mgx3, plus prn topiramate, 100mg x2, and the Indica strains of pot REALLY help with cluster headaches, but sometimes I have to resort to psilocin, sunshine, or lucy, plus oxygen or NOS. (Throwing up multiple times per day isn't in my list of things to do.  
Note: I know what I am mixing, how it affects me personally based on tolerance, body weight, fluid intake, hepatic/renal metabolism, 1st/2nd round metabolism, drug classes (all cns depressants, hence why no pain control x benzodiazepines,or x EToH/ EToH x ca++2 inhibitors.  
Thank you all in advanced, and I hope you guys have a good day. I wanna get in on this, trying to be a glass full kinda guy (Air+beer in the glass means it is completely full)",7.508510594947026,7.951961533007338,7.587790342298291,71.01496994702528,63.25427872860635,10.630847595762024,36.96831703341483,10.411451182825502,3.993437571312144,3546,163,603,78,48,1146,448,818,0.136,0.762,0.102,-0.9852,2,0,3,0,0,0,179.0,1,3,1,9,17,37,9,4,32,0,68,26,14,4,8,97,107,51,0,9,17,1,2,0,1,9,9,5,2,5,36,33,3,4,13,2,1,14,14,22,0,6,23,11,70,15,106,67,18,84,4,3,4,1,26,46,9,19,22,387,106,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620895913442447,0.0,0.07296432598098221,0.10575121031353273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0449634124461612,0.06933188366228894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04623217362497347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181264908321546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015286525697172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203310137991165,0.0,0.07381104043351314,0.0675152295919772,0.07562290033662948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864972127739245,0.0,0.07415845201949436,0.052790905668821615,0.0,0.07262898043978433,0.2558489916897989,0.0,0.05694848295243196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667743252598294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051083631157328495,0.0,0.06908924300341714,0.0,0.07515427911875934,0.1663732736366267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964055990338704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745212915060728,0.0,0.04431839387076902,0.0,0.0,0.06567141466527125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06561323369235826,0.11753979888362565,0.0,0.0,0.21802473106901807,0.05389607963973039,0.0,0.0,0.14367769330854005,0.06761149572590686,0.046702038905371564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217706042430291,0.056212290813667735,0.0,0.06256370974318527,0.044135166904515584,0.0,0.0,0.0720233350654585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743816141123543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050995304237407314,0.0,0.0,0.062048513149193324,0.0,0.06344328139589933,0.0,0.0,0.14082985934500386,0.17921667961957133,0.10057346143763407,0.07035563000242846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916776379073006,0.11546569907221667,0.0,0.07257917023638652,0.06250413950385868,0.07453961115294512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772899597228299,0.0,0.0,0.07032604736677542,0.13227444777085887,0.0,0.0423577365563382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05646554745144512,0.06289462500816814,0.10516149178179954,0.0661969849970423,0.0,0.052688546352523284,0.1203851114489064,0.0,0.0,0.3393527158403725,0.05469459390736117,0.0743208983976709,0.06616708164556345,0.06740033140730385,0.0,0.05090189134471334,0.1961811272421956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374466032125704,0.1491405249042016,0.0,0.0,0.12174759324709845,0.0,0.0,0.08785349114452196,0.0,0.1948857211673226,0.0,0.07710942731198635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978137119950885,0.07191884554443012,0.06458897892658527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054555372697249416,0.07799778909857223,0.0,0.0,0.0805155325740111,0.0,0.06129328230960994,0.059662412073456274,0.07381987186594169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627132097156203,0.0,0.0,0.09393855145097764,0.07229110892262719,0.0,0.08515736278454301
mentalhealth,indiepidge,2020/02/22,"How to accept what seems to be the new me Hiya, I'm 23 (f) and have PTSD. My symptoms seem to be getting worse and if I'm honest, I think I'm depressed as well. All my days roll into one, I have no motivation and dont find happiness in anything that I would've enjoyed before. I used to be the soul of the party, usually happy and positive and always up for fun things. These days I dont want to leave my bed let alone my house. So I'm definitely struggling with my identity at the moment and wondered if anyone had any tips etc? 

Also, tips on how to communicate this to my partner would be greatly appreciated. He has never suffered with anything like this before and just doesnt understand why I cant go to the supermarkets to buy food or go for a walk. Things that are very simple to him, and would've been to me before. But now the thought of those things use up all ny energy. 

Thanks on advance for anyone that can help me. I should also note that I have been receiving therapy.",4.414351320321469,4.898152134328356,5.762388059701491,81.28780711825489,69.94527363184079,8.771680061232301,27.899349406812092,8.841846274778883,1.9718607730577884,773,25,160,13,13,261,122,201,0.08,0.7070000000000001,0.213,0.9813,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,8,13,0,1,7,0,20,2,0,5,3,35,37,18,0,5,5,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,1,12,11,1,0,9,0,1,5,6,3,1,1,4,0,18,10,26,26,3,19,1,2,0,0,5,7,0,6,8,109,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241401018464332,0.0,0.19170598908620146,0.09973415795437626,0.0,0.0,0.08150975700539198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16761953922046716,0.0,0.19727118404549934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059792745978356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15460117466010606,0.0,0.10323631492241732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.280952973568633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367697237280254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955100671335652,0.0,0.1449366935644772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06262255356661435,0.0,0.13623981578845834,0.0,0.0,0.13214744606492795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551890488156903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034046614235675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830378417046935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691575215045398,0.0,0.12256624414324838,0.0,0.058558150016837715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924443815687744,0.11576273759093016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812210818329004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011138152620925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182343520527244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530499822967034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458172789362687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11035213078461012,0.13707177998501113,0.0,0.2388914561535924,0.07680224618834769,0.0,0.09515644011867903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247797834668938,0.0,0.2070432634237597,0.13201022780310107,0.09889808023837046,0.07069726796197848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776965426062468,0.0,0.10815613063812674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299844075641739,0.0,0.0,0.12214884896961845,0.2554379689723065,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,newmelife,2020/02/22,"How to leave regret of the past career decisions from haunting the present? I was a decent student in my undergrad. Graduated with 3.6 GPA. After completing my undergrad from a tier-2 university in India, I joined the top university in India for my master's degree. Got 3.8 GPA. I always wanted to go for a PhD, but I did not secure a position right after my master's. So, I looked for a job and made a mistake of not choosing the right company. The company was small, paid less but was near to my university.

 I made an hasty decision of joining the company so that I can regularly continue with the research work in the university. However, after 4 months, I had to leave the organization as work culture was miserable. Soon after, I fell ill (got severe jaundice) and had to rest at home for 3 months. 

I got a PhD admit in the Canada soon after and joined it after 6 months as the visa process took a long time. But now, I have 9 months of gap in my resume after my master's degree and the job.

I am a 3rd year PhD in mechanical engineering and would be completing soon. But, the ghost of bad decisions made after my master's degree (bad job selection, gap year) is making me regret my life.

Whenever I talk with my colleagues, they discuss about their experiences in great companies and organizations. While, I don't reveal the organization I have worked for after my master's. I feel so incompetent due to my gap year. That has affected my PhD studies too. 

I dread my future career due to my past career mistakes. I don't know how to look past the regrets? I am panicking about this and feel miserable.

TL;dr: Joined a mediocre company after master's degree out of bad decisions. Have a 9 months gap in the resume after leaving the company in 4 months. Currently a PhD student regretting the past poor career choices and dreading the future career opportunities. How to live past the regrets?",4.9868921994620345,6.669696960893855,6.621893234016137,71.20310883509208,69.61452513966479,9.661245603145048,30.01903579557211,9.994966539143718,3.2853280364163053,1504,60,256,39,27,517,156,358,0.214,0.752,0.033,-0.9968,5,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,2,12,13,17,0,4,33,0,19,2,0,8,0,45,36,21,1,9,6,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,4,12,0,1,10,0,3,3,4,14,0,0,15,4,37,3,53,19,2,59,0,7,2,0,6,17,0,0,39,174,41,24,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733225838048173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327992398714638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948884507452142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909116644368839,0.0,0.0,0.09398497337002733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05281907850007568,0.0,0.2229941715128922,0.1024649994848166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322487061765312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766812946656623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05107655665263761,0.0,0.0,0.295225285072598,0.0,0.0,0.06564519513675113,0.0,0.0,0.08206637829581917,0.08224762793554223,0.15608982780034875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638219035506441,0.06203715537367619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4450956360710669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4436014646461207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587379038617203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499402562705012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470042772337622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05419317358964672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325806809152002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05481752195001087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029809554157637,0.0,0.0,0.06602082784177858,0.0,0.0,0.1795479971008118
mentalhealth,WhiteGlvSociety,2020/02/22,"Afraid So, I don't know if this is the right place to post this but just want to vent/talk about something that is going on with me. Lately I've been really afraid of doing normal things. Like simple things, showering has been something I have to talk myself into I get a feeling of pure terror. Once I'm in there it's fine but it is always something I have to give myself a pep talk about. Also sleeping has become a problem. It's like I've just watched a scary movie and need to stay up. Watching TV also fills me with dread, I just sit on my couch scrolling on my phone. It's not a constant thing but seems to be increasing.",1.8846666666666685,3.8114962615384655,2.8857692307692315,93.66839743589745,78.69230769230771,5.256410256410256,20.06410256410256,5.985473137389443,-0.08620512820512838,494,12,106,3,12,157,82,130,0.125,0.784,0.091,-0.8201,1,0,3,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,4,6,0,12,1,1,0,1,20,21,8,0,5,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,10,4,0,0,3,1,0,3,2,5,0,0,2,3,11,3,18,18,1,16,0,0,2,0,4,8,0,2,4,70,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700320055344749,0.14048290729510018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18646321715032504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18244891783748413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536723598651849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820847909805916,0.1619603740908871,0.09595190757045792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927864169940814,0.0,0.19045142029859088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496693467750911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251878210572233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542087766048236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980205259742066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763949605229206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616957198946282,0.0,0.0,0.16155075491492074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815899428760734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441827944730823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15369957934599415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895532168513086,0.0,0.0,0.3899285813720453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17995393211785274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4071056561338986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33649621129572105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958230905867574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LivinMyAuthenticLife,2020/02/22,"[24M] Gay grew up in a conservative homophobic religious family. I was in denial for most of my life and now I’m coming to terms. My family influenced me at a very young age to become a doctor, I did well in college and got into med school but dropped out because I couldn’t take the stress anymore Now I’m living at home with my parents and can’t seem to hold a job. I get depressed everytime I get job and start working, can't seem to concentrate on anything and thinking about going back to school for another major but can't seem to figure out what I'm actually interested in. 

I feel like I've been living in this superficial dream and woke up to reality and now I suck at everything. I'm planning to see a therapist once I get medical insurance but everything has been so difficult after I stopped being in denial about my sexuality.

I know so many other guys that are in the same boat, why is this common among young gay adults? What can I do to better myself while I don't have a therapist? How can I overcome this depression? 

I'm out to my friends and siblings and they are all supportive but my parents aren't willing to even try to understand.",4.142948815889991,5.464819424242427,5.902485357779479,76.94683728036672,71.20779220779221,9.591138273491216,30.038451744334093,9.916854025145753,3.0353512095747406,921,38,177,24,17,317,133,231,0.11,0.797,0.09300000000000001,-0.7941,4,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,3,11,11,1,1,8,0,20,5,0,2,1,36,44,17,0,1,4,2,1,1,1,1,3,0,1,2,7,15,0,3,8,1,0,3,6,5,1,0,6,2,22,6,37,35,5,35,0,2,1,2,6,18,1,4,14,120,29,7,0.0,0.0,0.11696980642428086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568767570322725,0.0,0.0,0.1188727098799699,0.0,0.0,0.09863771811031104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921678856581545,0.0,0.07306787755102723,0.13238018177812713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600981601596984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325207511366254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064770803568768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268570792670892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916892851429737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21545176107084724,0.0,0.22599390052595425,0.0,0.0606067533881542,0.0856307433036914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260649685965286,0.0,0.18787171018227028,0.0,0.06812137621703117,0.0,0.0958660537266103,0.0,0.0,0.11868403555815635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202331934685325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378927097476447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658740256439697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466336713437063,0.0585594122362031,0.0,0.21168391382105206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152310911514767,0.0,0.0,0.13314169252267302,0.1207501972849066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765106582783975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661891940927857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426171881073126,0.09551595279723243,0.3273585841325635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484023501888194,0.0,0.0,0.10021152809286653,0.1373036110074725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602005256539615,0.0,0.0,0.09012268208219396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27834228767312386,0.0,0.07680390165872059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137967174294992,0.0,0.0,0.12478247309180608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890021198385834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777197723265454,0.0,0.10815846194064464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726229499788199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1gilzanmato,2020/02/22,"Feeling disturbed/disgusted wanting relations with others? I met this girl recently, and I seemed to have gotten interested in her, but I feel disturbed/disgusted in myself for having said interest, i've never been interested in a person like this or even a thing like this. I haven't been able to stop thinking about how I'm reacting to this whole situation and it's caused me to start drinking more heavily... It's been about a week since I met the person. 

Is this a normal reaction? And should I bring it up with my psychiatrist? I brought it up with my case manager and they encouraged me to continue on my path of interest, but all the negatives are seeming to out weight the positives. 

To make it clear, I haven't been around people my age in quite awhile (7 years about) and the case manager seems ""excited"" that i'm interested in something/someone when I've never been ever. I'm completely lost on what to do...",5.562923809523809,6.764930697142859,6.5500714285714325,74.07634523809523,67.74285714285715,10.861904761904762,32.86904761904762,10.864195022040775,3.882361904761905,732,32,133,22,12,244,101,175,0.034,0.764,0.20199999999999999,0.9839,0,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,2,8,10,0,0,8,0,13,2,0,4,5,32,32,10,0,3,3,0,3,2,0,1,0,1,0,3,14,10,2,1,6,1,0,2,5,1,0,0,11,4,17,9,27,20,3,24,0,1,0,0,9,11,0,4,13,97,31,2,0.16674024908887566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14843417267476605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712881665297609,0.0,0.0,0.1748239788036924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16334196543129414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013036195846047,0.15082610136030303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686177598465079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16292172665904076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820166786557924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130041102607792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572007186152782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337004180010425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559669416293207,0.291182308066366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17734877936896834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463588028173162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15860816001635974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4553821813341529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792925709250878,0.18742302611847206,0.0,0.0,0.14127847196044432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801960651245838,0.0,0.0,0.13940231437242118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077481247114944,0.10684041893998053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834771900350776,0.0,0.13374897020231502,0.20304470330561128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861595334701475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737525361943
mentalhealth,TotalFRIENDS,2020/02/22,"16 and not good i’m only 16 yrs old, male white well educated good family to support me and friends too, no financial problems either. i’ve been officially diagnosed with depression, severe anxiety and ptsd. my incredible sporting career was cut short by multiple knee injuries that required surgery. anyone know how to improve my mindset? i’ve got hobbies eat well listen to good music hang out with good people but don’t feel right",4.219102564102563,7.3953739871794895,5.187435897435896,73.30756410256413,78.35897435897436,8.082051282051282,31.743589743589745,8.841846274778883,3.5779128205128217,353,18,53,9,9,115,64,78,0.203,0.6920000000000001,0.105,-0.6555,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,11,1,0,0,0,3,3,1,1,0,14,9,5,0,1,3,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,6,1,1,2,1,0,1,3,3,2,0,3,3,3,8,7,6,1,5,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,25,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425453294664062,0.0,0.0,0.13028936643736405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16048957212414966,0.18912552485243786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906666410486187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17565951792513354,0.0,0.09421628688556542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14396151893695738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6251539195788421,0.14902866620568242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240453004685128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19552664019551397,0.0,0.0,0.14171573109904292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918083255514595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17829688516619602,0.2178149780701052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912858570451702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105048687049638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21145010379645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350740621312019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,g00dVybez100,2020/02/22,How to think? How do you keep a positive mindset when nobody likes you? And you have no one to really talk to about life? No love life or relationship. Being kept in the dark about stuff and being a complete outcast. And all goals are pretty much pointless in the end. You pray and never get a response. I'm just wondering what someone else would do. All good input would be greatly appreciated.,2.3930666666666696,5.187300573333335,3.550666666666668,84.44866666666668,83.26666666666667,6.0,23.0,7.3871296695380915,1.2254000000000005,313,11,57,5,9,101,55,75,0.049,0.6920000000000001,0.258,0.9625,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,4,0,1,6,4,0,0,5,0,9,3,0,2,3,17,16,8,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,4,4,7,10,3,5,1,0,0,1,7,2,0,2,4,43,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24000440279379776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19122224129450624,0.0,0.2027434631857394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195943443213718,0.0,0.0,0.1919961459334408,0.0,0.2523705321129616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20346286293016494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.323367255367546,0.11183228975941707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065973052905344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682728210189384,0.0,0.17654701972751266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551131576987745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328804878572159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664354420968595,0.0,0.0,0.2457602148249225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19395197113412566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26204349664737336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18398659823745794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14667422122180646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482396374670831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32521761648838626,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonythrowthrow,2020/02/22,"i think i will relapse (eating disorder) (triggering) I think im going to purposely relapse back into my eating disorder. At least when i had the disorder i was skinny but since ive recovered ive been gaining weight and my mother makes sure i notice it (offhanded comments about my weight). I dont care if im ruining my past two years of recovery, i dont care if i get hunger pangs, i dont care if i waste half an hour in the bathroom puking out food, i just want all this weight OFFME. In fact, even without the fats i dotn mind starving myself to tick off my mom. I fucking hate it when people make comments about my weight. Guess i havent actually fully recovered as i though.",2.2322964626614272,4.353105817518252,3.937518248175184,85.60269511510387,78.4160583941606,7.135092644581696,25.13700168444694,8.139509932561175,1.6627971925884342,535,20,106,10,13,179,85,137,0.225,0.6970000000000001,0.078,-0.9675,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,8,7,2,0,4,0,10,11,2,3,3,20,23,9,0,4,6,2,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,10,0,2,0,0,1,5,3,0,2,3,4,25,4,13,19,2,13,0,1,0,1,4,6,1,4,6,68,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.10410999441460364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08203482893927758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3263199854949703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668136611730825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.375105044879762,0.0,0.0,0.21833250572957472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704649939791873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12900494640003404,0.0,0.0,0.09862934393863652,0.055738950348694506,0.0,0.060632023889526016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11752648536021575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533018400349556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050640664045146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23047803844443154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14242725899315273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772229002317713,0.12494917142981456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214625408397357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184371013520722,0.07396253143413196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825163286254648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055014567364648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671996247827128,0.10481830034696477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421656781747488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292607510055127,0.0,0.0,0.5196584680737675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10284134680787912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870218589366574
mentalhealth,Astray-No-Name,2020/02/22,"Just got in a relationship and I’m happy! But I’m also depressed??? I just got into a relationship in the past week and we’ve been spending a good amount of time together, but while I’m definitely happy, I have an underlying depression. Not about the relationship at all, but maybe because in the past week we’ve had some people act incredibly rude towards us. Doesn’t help that we saw one of them tonight and they winked at my girlfriend as a “fuck you”. Might also be my year or so of unchecked depression hating that I’m happy who knows. Anyone have any clue? Thanks y’all.",3.2684070796460176,5.360427035398232,4.5851415929203565,82.31594247787613,75.10619469026548,7.705840707964603,25.45929203539823,8.548686976883017,1.7875458407079647,457,16,90,9,10,151,74,113,0.196,0.621,0.183,-0.5847,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,2,2,2,0,6,11,3,0,8,0,7,1,0,0,1,16,18,12,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,6,0,1,5,1,10,5,13,11,3,17,0,3,1,1,12,8,1,3,8,58,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22775267411544586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683612501084043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956861148008872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680503872731975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36794385352508346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164547479456815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943742884751204,0.22777879378150165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4547587836179958,0.0,0.1405894182158046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954469711187558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825870326062118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14305881990774744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106271410200833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649316993260272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27187169741149697,0.09872145731510053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45864933427169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13110176161075074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303393510933718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17128832579922962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284475926994205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170021334647983
mentalhealth,WatchJayneCode,2020/02/22,"What the hell is wrong with me? If I don't create things, (art mainly), I start to feel way more depressed and feel like just going back to being high 24/7.",4.232500000000002,4.39943225,4.293749999999998,92.77625,70.25,6.4,19.125,3.1291,-0.5535500000000004,120,1,27,0,2,37,29,32,0.331,0.606,0.063,-0.8911,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,7,2,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,2,3,1,3,6,2,5,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,3,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843652233540499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185214711930446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3739795665468101,0.2641962031747349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101746202032732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3907302854991626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806731294866856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617572510021005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24568892618414545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.293542259387688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4043350968180359,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,awesomeguy9145,2020/02/22,"sorry to add another pointless rant to this sub i just need to vent everyone else my age is actually achieving shit. My best friend is playing football for the Aussie U17 team, my ex dumped me because she ""wasn't ready for a relationship"" after 8 months of dating and is now is going to model in NEW FUCKING YORK as part of kidz fashion week.

I'm just sitting here on reddit being sad boi listening to everyone else's problems and helping the best i can but then not even being able to talk about my own stuff. 

my own parents even said they'd be better off if they hadn't have had me when they thought i couldn't hear them. 

I do ok in school, i'm not *overlyyy* ugly and i have a fair amount of ""friends"" so i guess everyone just thinks i'm doing fine. 

guess i'm not suicidal, but i certainly wouldn't mind being ran over by an eighteen wheeler. i'd feel too bad for the one or two people that would properly care if i committed die.

Oh and i'm bi and have a crush on a dude who is straight wooooo. 

anyway sorry for the mini rant i'm gonna go murder more innocent wooloo in pokemon. Thanks for reading if you did. :'( ✌️",1.979628489326764,3.8492643232758654,3.5194334975369483,89.50701149425288,78.18103448275863,6.488013136288997,24.409688013136286,7.447530270364453,1.0703515599343183,881,31,187,12,21,291,152,232,0.161,0.66,0.179,0.7021,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,4,5,12,18,4,0,9,1,23,3,1,0,2,31,45,15,3,8,12,2,1,0,2,3,0,3,0,0,4,6,0,0,3,3,0,3,7,7,0,2,7,4,21,11,25,29,7,21,0,1,0,2,18,8,2,6,9,115,25,4,0.1288477122809574,0.0,0.12573678068026758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13510806076557494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758245778206198,0.07854436948524378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704354495334636,0.11395533081423125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13136882992030904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13372358291733802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152714604668328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17020539753971287,0.0,0.0,0.3693585321955775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514927476983093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19909484577539605,0.11911763377937006,0.0,0.0,0.14645424837192564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838805629940037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14522073610713154,0.0,0.08636390554871683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009945904982656,0.0,0.10284501466378107,0.0,0.0,0.09553894603289577,0.0,0.12444192342186358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873105444465802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307013638929153,0.13952951628237614,0.0,0.08932678025565575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232898593892383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888258030178593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13833422307952936,0.0,0.0,0.12256368020841235,0.0,0.0,0.1304007636793862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226032506502436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.288468929961912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749980401661658,0.14093848440542706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356291046683773,0.0,0.11862566223221248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825604113870428,0.0,0.10229069112195534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258654925936484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335386281758877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152971798292668,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AjaxRoo,2020/02/22,"Need to get this off my chest I'm 22, unemployed, and in the center of watching my life fall to crap.
Let's start with the fact I have had clinical depression and anxiety for as long as I can remember, I know because I was diagnosed.
As of the end of last year I had to quit my job before i either got fired or killed myself. The ladder was the more likely as I had already sliced up my arm and been caught by some body when I tried to fall in front a a moving bus. I even had a new will and 12+ pages of a suicide not in my backpack every day. 

Now that I'm jobless I feel useless and like I'm a weight on everybody around me. I can't go a day without wanting to kill myself yet somehow I manage to pull through. Today for instance I lost 100+ karma here on reddit for simply stating some fact about a artist I don't like as a person do to stuff the have done. While I stand by what I said I also regret it at the same time.

My relationship with my SO is also under crazy strain all the time right now as they are back in college while working (which makes me feel like trash seeing how well they are doing). I feel like all I ever do is annoy my friends whenever I'm around them and it hurts.

To be honest I don't know how much more of this I can take at this point. I'm scared to get a new job but also hate myself for not having one. I feel like a nuisance on my friends and family, I don't have the money to seek professional help, and to be honest as I write this I honestly kind of just want to go to my balcony and jump over the edge.

If anybody could recommend coping technics or ways to help fight this I would be very thankful.",4.480811965811967,3.905247643874645,5.64310398860399,85.86277564102566,69.71225071225071,8.501481481481482,27.236609686609693,7.734863291789972,1.3399867806267816,1277,34,289,13,20,428,189,351,0.10099999999999999,0.7609999999999999,0.138,0.9521,5,0,0,0,1,2,24.0,0,0,3,3,20,27,6,2,20,0,32,8,4,3,5,48,60,29,3,7,9,0,6,6,2,2,3,1,0,1,11,13,1,0,7,1,1,9,7,13,1,1,12,9,44,14,53,41,10,50,1,5,2,0,12,18,1,6,26,204,55,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370679473463527,0.2472022663622139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882503546364841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18345423400992786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923111576154447,0.0,0.0628120025034294,0.0,0.08767913650944338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445380110028107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226876071334865,0.0,0.0,0.1329040751079644,0.0,0.08874788294774144,0.10458305620660743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544531681516826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126252902909153,0.0,0.0,0.06805670429609954,0.09320524511018476,0.08681533293861719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713659354401524,0.0,0.20839973313213891,0.22083459830918686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592163261761684,0.0,0.10766790848734073,0.0,0.11711959336695045,0.0,0.08241020553066672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10173030296854824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381305849695842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030605579470333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20450186841381154,0.0,0.2279961695853189,0.10729991922211683,0.11325577264155327,0.08399105154748779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536500355271113,0.07277993841656467,0.3020397530018059,0.0,0.0,0.0911868307130078,0.0,0.0,0.11247992884022118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877975361683819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951482066458457,0.07574598446598979,0.07640258056334219,0.0,0.19903263484657926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982232045779796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997023111484494,0.0,0.0,0.09740575637583096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095953306622257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062600188055212,0.1167238152223796,0.08799528163000858,0.09801428464616598,0.0,0.10316064575272453,0.0,0.08210924509237869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293198096079956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795572515083524,0.11270863199132795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747297885598645,0.0,0.0,0.09486504814963917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016647458313552,0.0,0.0976695218082342,0.0,0.0,0.06995714555519578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501848652140677,0.12155088771872374,0.08178806276003084,0.0,0.12547451117042005,0.09264500257325274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932652702962982,0.0,0.07501407835521429,0.0,0.0,0.07319639730715362,0.0,0.0,0.06635414389224073
mentalhealth,astrrogo,2020/02/22,"High Energy Depression??? Is it normal for me to be depressed but still pretty high energy?  It's not a case of if I'm depressed or not, I know I am. But I am still a pretty ""happy go lucky"" person as some people say.  I'm not bipolar, this energetic attitude doesn't come out in random waves of mania or whatever. It's just when I'm around others I act as if I don't have a care in the world, but when I'm alone or sometimes even still when I'm with others my depressed and anxious thoughts come clawing up my throat. I've been told by my more mellow friends it can be annoying to deal with, which makes me feel worse. I don't mean to act so happy, but it's like I can't help it. At this point it's kind of a coping mechanism; if I pretend I'm happy, then maybe I can be. Not to say it's worked but it has helped. I honestly feel as if I don't act ""happy"" then my depression will be too much to handle. When I'm alone it's all I can do to keep thinking and crying and thinking and crying. I just feel tired now, and like I'm just a burden to be around. Am I valid?",1.997737556561088,2.7045539572649595,4.09960281548517,90.18690045248873,75.66666666666666,7.215284062342888,22.311714429361487,7.510576382923642,0.6369289089994972,822,20,195,10,17,284,110,234,0.213,0.6,0.187,-0.6438,0,2,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,16,18,1,0,6,0,22,3,1,1,1,46,45,27,0,5,19,0,3,2,1,1,2,2,0,1,15,12,0,1,8,1,0,6,9,7,0,0,3,5,20,11,24,36,4,27,0,5,0,0,8,11,0,10,12,128,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21353148419613024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116457548908939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835363358116968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510278665508868,0.0,0.0,0.17759848181941712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264696992385309,0.0,0.10627687593039356,0.4439380027171344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808716190900405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563697491487374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964379035861475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05858600411796092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43894676686845896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819240294814766,0.2178314973818088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162734606952702,0.0,0.10734793946403354,0.05665322916185301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007249752408212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881053481808788,0.0,0.10356348585111408,0.11229059620321688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577988328459696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010021422731729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146667541677444,0.09001049575152646,0.0,0.0,0.09744934865454988,0.0,0.0,0.2097505239671908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639558429093246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195443704379026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469732257636277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210636510095358,0.0,0.08183856621326563,0.0,0.11848189858843572,0.0,0.09850284635540467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504764962177153,0.0,0.10505318033972996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moms-disappointed,2020/02/22,"Scared I’m just tired guys it’s been a long life.. peace just sounds nice.. I haven’t had it in so long and I’m just, 
tired",-3.263103448275864,-1.8432317931034448,-1.5279999999999987,116.348,108.3103448275862,2.32,5.8,3.1291,-3.17524,94,0,29,0,5,29,21,29,0.27899999999999997,0.609,0.11199999999999999,-0.6369,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,1,1,1,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999321455749542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139568749646105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5361381106319165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30326941551190706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6963093792627583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wubba-Lubba-UwU,2020/02/22,"Why do I have no motivation ever? (13F) *Let me start this by asking you to not call me ""dramatic"" just because I'm 13. Mental illness affects anyone and everyone;* ***it does not discriminate****. I shouldn't even have to say this.*

I go through this awful cycle. I get an idea for something I want (maybe a career idea, writing idea, even just something basic I need like getting a sandwich), I procrastinate or at the very least attempt it, get discouraged somehow (something else comes up, I doubt myself, etc), and then I beat myself up over it. I do this constantly but I have no motivation to fix it. I want to do so much but I can't ever have enough of that feeling to want.

I feel like absolute garbage. I see other people do amazing things like learn an instrument or another language or study what they want independently, but when I attempt it I immediately give up. It's so frustrating to the point where I end up doing nothing the entire day while I think to myself how worthless I am.

What is wrong with me? How do I fix this? I did therapy for depression and anxiety in October/November, but I ended up losing motivation for that, too.",1.4471232876712319,4.148823369863017,3.5830273972602766,82.37618493150686,89.27397260273972,6.572968036529679,25.10821917808219,7.793537801064563,1.9736421917808231,894,39,164,20,30,303,129,219,0.158,0.718,0.124,-0.8922,0,0,3,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,1,7,14,11,1,1,7,1,16,2,0,7,2,42,34,17,0,6,11,0,2,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,17,5,1,1,10,0,0,2,6,7,0,0,1,4,31,4,22,31,4,22,0,4,1,0,7,10,0,5,13,127,48,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061510639403331,0.09529031031659936,0.0,0.0,0.08709730585522606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644953677917552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593241379408028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271926915952272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729994568615824,0.0,0.13460828939660552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033279328633483,0.0,0.10728588013045083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900587068014908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405635516174397,0.0,0.22065159020373187,0.12870681771067902,0.13892060797567132,0.16454529790833036,0.22534862629475386,0.0,0.11902522989598385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12596553317896134,0.08898779124232484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19523698943902226,0.11949212505512358,0.07079199096102815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4218492017843858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737404843512806,0.0,0.1825654858396112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935407105325712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251402184641741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553014884977862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156809537154127,0.09236184377268516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11952150312078233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635626061699593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775224326992526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905745172409132,0.0,0.0,0.09926053821216176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28768391694210715,0.0,0.0,0.08816629205278179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424485808873648,0.0,0.08275408431727413,0.07981490413043799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027774731165024,0.2938818039686604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239868137230233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619002375969588,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suguzelortamibozan,2020/02/22,"How can you mend a broken mind? It’s getting hard to survive in social life day by day. It’s getting hard to communicate in a right and healthy way with people day by day. I have a weird tendency to think I am the only person in the world who makes life complexer, harder for its own sake. Just think, everyday, you create meaningless (yes, you sense that meaningless) scenarios about people around you. Everyone, even your close friends are dangerous for you. Just think, you have always jitters that kill you inside as time goes on. Just think, being on the alert, even for the random people and situations, everytime. Except for making sure sockets, doors, ovens, windows are ok or not for 2737272 times a day, lack of social skills drives me mad. Social networking sites like Instagram just increase my anxieties. To my sick brain, if someone doesn’t like my latest posts, he/she has a problem with me, talk behind me, or just hates me. If someone saw my latest stories on the Instagram, and if she/he is someone that I don’t know well, probably he/she is mocking me.  Yes, these are my inner worries I keep like a secret in my daily life. I camouflage them with my best charachter traits that I developed over the years. 

From an external perspective I am an easy person. Easy in mind, easy in life, easy in dealing with problems... but definetely not. Every day is a surviving for me around people. I still have fear about going to campus after a long semestr. I still have fear that people in school will mocking me, talking behind me, despite all of that therapies I attended, medications I took for many years. I am a complete social media stalker, because I have great fears. Checking if people talk behind me badly, etc... 

Because, yes. I have been bullied in primary school like many others. All that physical and psychological violence from my own family, from the school, just gave me scars that I can’t cure. I am sorry to say but they formed this sick charachter. I believe life isn’t for everybody. To people like me, it’s miserable, it’s agonising as hell. I’m 21. Still trying to heal my scars, trying to believe that life is full of hope if you see it like toy vending maschine (what the hell is that?) that you can pick up toys, but sometimes you can’t. Thank you Reddit, you just gave an opportunity to spread my ideas to the world, (I know it’s not that great platform, but I want to think that way...), express me. Thank you.",4.270388716890267,6.2939190413943376,4.776998624011012,82.32780959752327,72.09368191721133,7.794541910331384,27.547356954477703,8.532816995589336,2.0835978213507618,1916,71,351,34,38,609,217,459,0.16399999999999998,0.6940000000000001,0.142,-0.9546,0,1,0,0,0,0,87.0,0,14,2,5,18,33,8,4,21,4,29,11,1,4,3,59,53,18,1,10,22,0,2,6,1,1,10,1,3,2,25,11,0,1,10,2,1,5,8,16,1,0,5,5,57,17,57,46,10,50,2,1,2,0,33,24,2,9,24,230,82,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05716367258638756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052555099715715294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12231463652316728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736139874469706,0.0837574264443902,0.0,0.0,0.1548021234337615,0.07209612038616639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076691610734548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203035203275249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26583382597316346,0.07082639736025169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661835060114587,0.09075103765107552,0.0,0.057882479247930926,0.06564552896392123,0.0,0.0,0.06476398430679932,0.23191886260488898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05307723522951832,0.0,0.07178553911776188,0.0,0.03904363551414262,0.0,0.0,0.1514833732980123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308291481843855,0.06782675307628107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682343256552894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755362460643693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06106346996910249,0.0760060642971956,0.0,0.07551114172732801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911478743996345,0.20137928570219776,0.0,0.0,0.0607970926076176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171519653606136,0.13930147164733805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920774289750795,0.0,0.0,0.13873427138361585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052249234731685454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3333941626285531,0.1199718957276514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579534385105329,0.0,0.07406992039979453,0.13147271277126207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05866918769367719,0.0,0.05463277678126528,0.0,0.20858336078858772,0.054744784293844405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07722136655816787,0.0,0.2801228623419608,0.17462715594730344,0.0,0.06794578225496316,0.07690371487199991,0.0,0.0,0.16459106152813946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474867548094455,0.0,0.0,0.1656547040731434,0.0,0.126498948860978,0.07856411998265345,0.0,0.0,0.22010004120244325,0.0,0.0,0.08011872138154756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632791955001736,0.09328520409421584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0405208763117984,0.10906128411171796,0.0,0.0,0.061769301082590815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976790301922316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848073783400552
mentalhealth,jstarr34,2020/02/22,"I feel very insecure socially  Whenever I open Instagram, I am reminded of all the social relationships people have built and how close they seem to each other. How they hangout/have fun on the weekends. How they always go to each other’s houses. How they all seem so close. I always wonder why I seem so lonely in comparison, why my social circle is relatively nonexistent. My close confidant (who is hundreds of miles away from me) told me I should be myself and that it’s fine not to have many friends. I know it’s unhealthy to keep comparing myself to others and how much happier/sociable they are but I can’t stop myself. I can’t help but feel as if I am boring/too introverted hence I only have acquaintances but not friendships. I can’t stop wondering why I am not included. 


I am writing this post to get help/advice from people who have experienced what I am going through. Should I deactivate my insta account? Is it getting bad for my mental health?",4.003831967213117,6.224165322404375,5.5066905737704905,75.95380635245905,73.37158469945355,8.946584699453553,27.284494535519126,9.516144504307137,2.8130330601092894,766,29,134,20,16,258,104,183,0.113,0.8340000000000001,0.052000000000000005,-0.8934,0,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,5,0,7,6,0,1,2,0,19,1,0,5,2,37,33,15,0,3,7,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,11,9,0,3,8,1,1,2,6,3,0,0,1,3,30,3,16,29,5,14,0,1,0,0,15,8,0,6,3,100,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13170941166366948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22430225033463166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12663404980980306,0.0,0.11253905005258122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13630172883880445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413382105155873,0.0,0.140838204029538,0.0,0.15320176102808314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14326914011813513,0.0,0.0,0.1806858123463324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15552269480944805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980225471528305,0.0,0.0,0.07407378781157196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366498693650431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358306187241621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908178364859377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250934202021728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18688457582167892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908586012409629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470762590932235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3681070051857676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4121860891975979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253709985281249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879193379993856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121095523456058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648649167025991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923351008627912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sabnastuh,2020/02/22,"Advice One of my best friends is a 20F in college, we live in the same building along with our other best friend. I was talking to her in private and she told me about how depressed she was, and that she was suicidal and didn’t feel like she deserved to be helped. She has been going to therapy in secret and hasn’t told anyone until tonight when she told me. She asked me not to tell our best friend because she will tell her herself, but I’m scared that she wont. I gave her a deadline to tell her by the end of March or I will tell our friend. Am I doing the right thing?",3.6101033057851235,4.061632851239672,4.059163223140498,92.89965392561984,71.72727272727273,6.711157024793389,25.868801652892564,5.985473137389443,0.5836520661157025,449,13,103,2,8,141,73,121,0.068,0.7759999999999999,0.156,0.8537,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,4,0,0,3,3,10,0,1,5,0,14,0,0,1,0,14,22,9,1,0,3,0,1,1,4,3,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,9,1,26,8,16,9,4,11,0,1,0,0,34,5,0,1,6,79,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134918666359866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654050946779676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907514758995253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416510523281838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4346822353627401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891795532356556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228746184500736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981144037160769,0.09863596374872834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4266846562221388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846735104501794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925442173189835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745315805553648,0.0,0.12191676753168006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935585989096476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179095052410851,0.0,0.0,0.1382303741261793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15102422298475826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109740050723292,0.4827108385214371,0.0,0.1578930420039588,0.0,0.09172639018031446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39579030215170896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xxggroyaltyxx,2020/02/22,Has anyone else experienced a similar problem involving therapy? I have struggled with living with a disabled parent since I was around 5. I've taken on major responsibility and it made me independent and easy to take care of for it but I lacked a childhood and went through much emotional trauma due to my parent being disabled. I went to therapy partly for this reason years ago and still do but it is always looked over and blown off and I don't understand why. It's like medical professionals don't believe that a person can be affected by these types of things. It's very stressful and is more common than most think but still is taken less serious and I've always wondered why. The professional will put off my situation as if I have no reason to feel the way I do from it. It's a natural response to feel like you've lost a part of yourself and from being burned out from doing it for so many years. It's an odd question and I want to know if anyone understands what I mean or can relate in some way. It would be extremely helpful. (:,4.625588235294117,6.061875088235299,5.910078431372551,76.91335294117647,70.17647058823529,8.969411764705884,28.796078431372557,9.3871,2.6086749019607844,834,31,154,18,15,280,124,204,0.11199999999999999,0.7659999999999999,0.122,0.5035,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,4,9,0,2,9,0,20,1,0,5,0,40,38,18,0,6,6,2,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,15,14,0,0,11,0,0,3,3,6,0,0,7,4,12,3,28,25,9,20,0,1,1,0,6,7,0,7,10,112,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485438728819506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968487050631089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654181973136924,0.12119912423200603,0.0,0.10530060753822136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13326906827454246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206015935732283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988137033681634,0.13305707940135506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961903538530415,0.08450433607384257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792853574375394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500750299238581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557821550946347,0.0,0.10444968655427624,0.0,0.09933138227014918,0.0,0.1291243552557117,0.0,0.0,0.11192612494196502,0.0,0.11992456514110385,0.0,0.12884934145311916,0.0,0.11916182037750295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695463722486521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626876779180357,0.2561868294688193,0.0,0.0,0.1032837431948795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318479065986342,0.0,0.1189112181535062,0.1325086361311094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432377025773048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784832095881517,0.13295966933551098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18892848004597976,0.0,0.13549748654613664,0.1236593718008296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893718681782699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27054324159520154,0.0,0.07858470083370214,0.07579360481005068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462821093325868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09759925499675022,0.06976880306234352,0.1877816065567472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193066748135342,0.21347143944897046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12827732660613625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402777017002724,0.0,0.0,0.15234604319142378
mentalhealth,_Akuji_,2020/02/22,"How to be happy again..? I have no-one to talk to and no-one to lean on. I have been rejected by my family since I was young. I can't remember the last time I was happy. Everything I do has to be done by me but I have nothing to try and get the help I need. Anyone ""close"" to me says I gotta figure it out and that they do not need to help me figure anything out. I have no money. I have no job. I live with my mother (over 18). I do not know my dad nor his side of the family. My mom stripped me from the right to know that side of the family and that side of the family has told me to my face they are disgusted by me and that they feel nauseous just thinking about me... I have no drive to go out and fix anything (depression). I know I need whatever it is I need but I have no drive to accomplish what I know I need to accomplish... I have almost given up completely. I live with family but I lock myself in my room so I never interact with them. When I do it's very short and uninteresting... I just do not care anymore. I have since the age of 8 asked my mom the point of me being here and told her on multiple occasions I wanted to kill myself (She never tried to get me help)... I feel there is no use for me and that I am just a dulled light in a bright world. The little hints I throw are never noticed. The only person I can talk to is only able to be done through the internet. I am not near her by any means in terms of distance. She is the only person that will sit there quietly and listen to what I have to say while trying to give the advice that she used to help herself when she was in bad times. We have sat in calls for hours just talking... crying... and her trying to find a way to help me... which I am very grateful for. She is the only person I truly think of when I am in a bad state of mind and nothing else matters besides her and my depression that's what keeps me going because even though we are far away from each other now... I do know she cares. I know she cares but knowing she cares I fear may not be enough when I do become worse... I have yet to become better.

A story I always think about that has happened to me at the age of 4 by my mother that really has affected me... not only because this story... but because it was the start of much worse: When I was four years old me, my mother and my two brothers were about to get ready for a trip. This trip I was greatly looking forward to because I loved the lake and boating. I was super excited and my mom and siblings were also excited.

So we all got ready and packed our stuff since we were going to be out for a few days... with what I thought was going to be fun... but before we set off we had to get the car loaded and to do so (since it was locked) my mother needed the keys. Her boyfriend at the time said he did not know where the keys were. I remember her getting mad at him for ""losing the keys"" and I was used to this because it happened all the time. My parents would always punch each other and throw things at each other in front of us literally whenever they got into fights they had no filter in front of us. There were times I had glass narrowly miss my face, legs, etc and cut my legs from exploding on impact from hitting the wall behind me and my feet for stepping on it for wanting to leave the room. Now that they are mad at each other because they lost the keys the attention turned to me... a 4-year-old innocent little boy playing with his toys wishing his parents would not be fighting with each other. The attention that was directed at me was pretty aggressive. My mom was bent down looking down on me pointing her finger at me which at the time was terrifying me because not only was she yelling at me for something I knew I did not have a part in... she was also hovering over me which was intimidating to a 4-year-old little boy... especially by his mother. She starts screaming in my face telling me how much of a this and that I am (usually how much of a piece of crap I am... and that I am not the child she had hoped for... or even beating me with race wheel tracks... those hot wheels ones... and at times making fun of me for the lisp I used to have or my weight). I try holding back my tears because it is something that really made me feel like I was at fault and that I should have been better. She made me feel like everything that's ever happened was my fault because anything that went wrong would be directed to me (and sometimes my siblings). She had her own problems as a child and this is probably why... she was abused and raped... but as a kid, I did not understand what was going on and why the person who said she loved me would then blame me for everything.

I would every night just lay in my room replaying all the shit she ever told me while crying. I would feel like everything she told me was my fault and I would apologize for things I should not be apologizing for... I thought it was normal. I thought every parent was like this... all I did know is I did not like it. I know its not as bad as others have it but it still affected me always being brought down at school then coming home and being brought down more by my own parents.

As I got older I allowed my depression to get the best of me and I basically just gave up on anything school-related from 5'th till about 11'th grade since I dropped out before 12th. The only grade I ever passed in that time frame has been 8'th. I tried to play football to take out my anger on the field but was shot down because ""my grades"" but was never questioned as to why I had bad grades and as to why I was always the guy in the back alone never talking. never trying. and never participating in anything anyone else ever did or never hanging out with anyone besides my own backpack... the only thing that would not talk negatively about me...

I never got therapy because no-one ever tried helping me and I cared less about helping myself... I had no drive to do so. I cried out for help hoping others would help me when I could not help myself... but my cries lead to nothing. I had a girlfriend from 5'th until 10'th and it went really well at the beginning but ultimately my depression killed the relationship. You cant have a healthy relationship if you can't even love yourself... that's what everyone has always ever told me. and that is what I now go by. I am trying to love myself but I just can't... I do not know-how. I feel numb and empty. I feel as if I am nothing and worth no value.

I tried and tried and tried to get help ever since I was 8 but all my cries for help were seen as being a ""young boy"" who just wanted ""attention"" or nothing but ""growing up"" and going through ""hormones""...

HOW DO I GET HELP? I can't figure it out and need advice before I really do give up. I do not know how much longer I can continue and all I ever wanted was to be happy. I have been dealing with sadness and depression for 80+% of my life and just can't keep going like this... everything is getting worse, not better. I just do not know how to do it... or how to go about it... or if I can pick myself up enough to go about it.

I have no-one physically to talk to and the one person I do talk to has helped me more than she could have ever imagined. It's just not enough... I still feel lost and empty and do not know what to do about it. I want to be able to love and be loved... but if I am lost how will I be able to be loved? I just want someone who actually shows they care and fights to help me in any way possible... but I have never had that. I need it. I want it. but I can't get it because I am not willing to even leave my bed to look for it.

If you look at my account age and question anything it is because I made this account for this reason. I have another that I did not want to have my personal problems on. People I know know about it and I did not want them knowing.",3.204137265932655,4.046220218730748,4.491412896139732,87.99824608213457,72.93715341959334,7.4690005089876506,24.341016367971285,7.7116992055012705,1.0098271788689759,6057,166,1332,74,115,2005,441,1623,0.14,0.742,0.11900000000000001,-0.9917,6,2,2,0,6,1,225.0,9,3,10,13,71,78,14,1,59,0,177,20,9,22,25,289,315,121,2,41,67,15,11,6,1,16,2,8,5,13,85,87,1,3,46,4,4,31,53,40,1,4,87,26,258,38,209,191,30,185,0,13,6,8,144,83,2,17,73,1016,343,9,0.07912613963709314,0.03125051222261708,0.025738566067646032,0.0,0.0,0.05154743192122764,0.0,0.0,0.02641113303311966,0.02731693915629459,0.0,0.042184763520197684,0.10973214473491463,0.0,0.0,0.03587232553611159,0.02765688551490028,0.0,0.0,0.02615728956400669,0.055326836608639324,0.027024693584258304,0.13022814187458953,0.0,0.024657419772326963,0.0,0.024780537620762728,0.040562078143872415,0.0880893619945495,0.20901642796881728,0.0582590697360687,0.06733051691560525,0.0,0.0276793339514178,0.0699806403914757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02693221180074707,0.0,0.16134874568156632,0.0,0.0,0.0227200543300454,0.02765408399056238,0.0,0.0,0.042117189298424944,0.0,0.14486058152344822,0.01700993804123873,0.02719185851623695,0.11358538020793355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05398234190509985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04406649094821119,0.0,0.0,0.08175845399550198,0.02941552058192097,0.06968275863187201,0.21472237007621064,0.044444790217780056,0.02520280576648742,0.11852245370480408,0.0,0.12432180400626967,0.029679635156001333,0.10668947646665322,0.056527729966889616,0.0,0.0,0.024106619379139518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378004738313459,0.05060333546124443,0.14989736206121174,0.0,0.08437920290426894,0.02907894942990235,0.0,0.026115772811558188,0.06997098396299235,0.08423124698827357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651829174565191,0.0,0.02645665653569468,0.052393406930810266,0.025974436265158683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02617349474205877,0.04688729902396995,0.058360899997017913,0.0,0.24641872309760304,0.02149945487646888,0.0,0.055855437975362486,0.0,0.0,0.01862971082121091,0.07731407002197918,0.07930517909910817,0.046579887305088656,0.0,0.08859470515687831,0.029507303523746718,0.0863755284659642,0.0,0.16663367073085866,0.07487106651463511,0.017605770877434496,0.0,0.0,0.0287305208958306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026631614902197644,0.12356210456170375,0.0,0.0,0.07755575600477023,0.15645607983261262,0.2034231895330162,0.0,0.0,0.02475150729923742,0.02584227225805679,0.1265394417092967,0.030028544807117637,0.08302957309976675,0.0,0.03574528001245573,0.16047731934511547,0.0,0.0,0.11714695215958575,0.02856196614698462,0.0,0.01828536743808257,0.1381797861872542,0.0,0.0,0.04986651852373759,0.029734277839958623,0.0,0.02683324345720301,0.028437120493022182,0.050475352942747964,0.0,0.0,0.05909292350753712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758697492283171,0.02711828332895957,0.0,0.0566345745594188,0.05975632765983395,0.022524430304065247,0.05017805233235352,0.04194952142007527,0.0,0.053386585103814437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027073948421431987,0.1309079207495379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0223477737801602,0.040610112030703575,0.026085925117078912,0.0,0.037337259263426785,0.0,0.04212682488372264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030193499707141132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01983100321250506,0.148396718855926,0.02305324455619975,0.0,0.03016254552882125,0.0,0.05256789124258158,0.05070083530596359,0.02591367681602991,0.06281731639628657,0.1230375689011952,0.0,0.0,0.12601402883243712,0.0,0.21488581934947576,0.028688839427393007,0.025764913649223373,0.027457700631801828,0.0634526689592097,0.0911194391746831,0.02904875465115072,0.0435249013068782,0.14001194173663378,0.041871097750190815,0.0,0.03211810712395021,0.02371463406703314,0.04890048278297072,0.09519871165167232,0.0,0.030330385196196977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806362962254253,0.1686268180750115,0.0288373374212213,0.0,0.05095463967389592
mentalhealth,TheBiPotatoQueen,2020/02/22,"Alone. I've been alone most of my life, never really had friends. Family was alright till about 4 years ago. Now I have an issues with many things. I'm 99.9% sure I'm depressed but too scared to tell my parents about it. Also, k recently became sorta-friends with this group...but i.. I can't help but feel left out. I've had abandonment issues, attention issues, and stuff like that for a long time. But I look at this group of individuals and I see a family... But to me, I'm just an intruder, a burden. I just always have to make things bad with mood swings, or I am just always annoying. They say they want to be my friends, but I don't feel like they do, and I'm starting to not feel anything, really. I care about them, but idk what to do.. my problems have ruined so many things for me.. and I'm trying to get myself fixed. I'm young, 14 years old. Always wanted to start my own band. But I'm holding Myself back, these feelings, and especially, the LACK of feelings... Idk if anyone can or will help me. I don't know shit anymore if I'm being honest. And that ain't even the most of it. So I guess it doesn't matter if people try to help me or not, if it's always going to end the same. Never happy. Always alone. Deadpanned face, monotone voice. Because.. it's easier. I don't want to be hurt anymore.. someone... please help..",1.106959033613446,3.2245049375000012,2.9485714285714306,91.22500000000004,82.34558823529412,5.650420168067227,18.905462184873947,6.868970318607317,0.16216974789915994,1021,25,219,12,28,340,140,272,0.223,0.67,0.107,-0.9875,1,3,0,0,0,0,65.0,0,0,4,0,13,20,2,1,8,1,21,3,2,1,3,52,47,24,0,9,19,1,5,2,2,1,1,2,0,0,15,10,0,2,7,1,0,1,10,10,0,0,4,9,27,9,26,39,5,20,0,4,2,0,15,3,1,10,18,136,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304899511164192,0.0,0.0,0.29109836647264475,0.0,0.07492247258806765,0.3897807132186568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858271704568518,0.06550901404975412,0.0,0.0770974602802767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204049363449169,0.0782257888701574,0.0571114974593635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09552143133115126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069356634851904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297999565442092,0.0,0.0,0.061880216194144265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664191855998745,0.0,0.2368580119034248,0.06693091605427952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21714996606109566,0.0,0.048948252220537114,0.0,0.053245200697534516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320818766799476,0.0,0.0,0.09973290143831393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25118907973424626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029522661576752,0.0,0.0,0.29335862664115675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051488620913838636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179257529545599,0.0,0.06617479306989657,0.0915427089233336,0.0,0.0,0.08291116734113067,0.07867454756959895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253764515355541,0.18997039383378506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14451633309991138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831007525719217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402973229599734,0.0,0.0,0.06495164729258468,0.0,0.0,0.10284158216966527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08964701782470375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200382046361782,0.0,0.09250586018222164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07450466961070729,0.09379829846200738,0.0,0.07465741825740407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616965886198668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938176387532553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326260739775535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725065001552052,0.0,0.0,0.08830008208722342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188767408881763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18672696310122086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054630381410628585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272163657072308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657793002560041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066434341471735
mentalhealth,makeitlastforeverr,2020/02/22,"I feel guilty for not spending time with my bedridden dad due to my depression. I’ll try to keep this short. I’ve been dealing with severe depression, anxiety, and OCD since I was about 10 (I’m 22 now). These past two years due to many circumstances, it all became unmanageable. At my worst I literally stayed in bed for a full week, getting up only if I felt like I couldn’t hold in my need to use the restroom. But my depression usually looks like me isolating and not talking to anyone for a few weeks, and then feeling normal for 1-2 weeks. Then the cycle repeats. 

So, last year my dad ended up getting sepsis and we were told that he probably wasn’t going to make it through the night. I’m very close with my dad and have a lot of trauma and anxiety when it comes to dealing with my mom. My dad is very well educated (got his PhD at 25, worked in the FDA, worked as a manager for many medical companies, etc.) so he always understood my mental illnesses, he was always there for me. He’d take me on drives at night just to talk and check up on me. So the thought of losing my biggest support system terrified me. 

Miraculously he survived. Unfortunately though he had to get all of his limbs amputated. He was in the hospital from July-December. Now he’s bedridden and needs me to help out sometimes. But there are a lot of days where I’m so depressed I can’t get out of bed to walk two rooms down to see my dad. The guilt drives me absolutely crazy and I know I’m hurting him. That just hurts me more. I feel so selfish and like I’m a horrible daughter. My dad is literally unable to get out of bed, but there’s nothing physically wrong with me. Why the fuck can’t I be “normal”. He was always there for me and would go out of his way if it meant he could make me feel better. Why the fuck can’t I do that for him? Am I really that self absorbed? I know mental illness is an invisible illness and it’s just as valid, but I just can’t help feeling like a total piece of shit. 

This past week I’ve been feeling a lot better so I’ve been trying to spend a lot more time with him and help him with daily tasks, but I still have that fear in the back of my mind that one day I’m gonna hurt my dad so much to the point where he gives up on me. 

I guess idk what I’m looking to hear, I just wanted to get this off my chest and see if anyone has been in a similar situation.

TLDR: My dad is now physically disabled and bedridden. I feel like an asshole because my depression causes me to isolate and not spend time with him.",2.259059561128531,3.872963141762455,3.978963775687912,87.66582288401257,76.58620689655173,7.274190177638454,24.31574364332985,8.07648339933343,1.2595003831417628,1968,65,429,33,44,661,231,522,0.147,0.7759999999999999,0.077,-0.9884,0,0,0,0,0,0,52.0,1,0,0,6,27,27,3,2,23,0,30,9,2,4,3,83,80,37,0,11,16,10,8,5,0,2,5,1,4,1,16,31,0,2,13,0,4,6,9,18,1,3,17,13,58,9,70,57,15,68,0,9,4,2,41,30,3,8,34,269,74,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761309554846184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795410802818864,0.0,0.0,0.0986722777375756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05425512579731226,0.0,0.04301180242950329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480650635794435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724830085372861,0.0,0.060779894039260374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05633521525968605,0.0,0.0,0.09100878164658938,0.14548541612964874,0.30385963313114617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06249388192331199,0.0,0.0786913709847307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939792104810796,0.2497354587264577,0.10081400298777686,0.06774721832449829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304603796189552,0.22118340237293807,0.06768613584035911,0.0802000351803463,0.0,0.056432072489111765,0.0,0.07772813486884121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952454964044825,0.0,0.14188161163606652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22660297822986186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271563054088691,0.0,0.0,0.07755420497210337,0.057514589107544076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17235657815107805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850272701050843,0.07893690549788558,0.0,0.23994523019508046,0.0,0.0,0.09419668393969258,0.14307047460710648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108025856252521,0.14221273080861144,0.0,0.0712439639596023,0.08263725422298936,0.0,0.0,0.05186861091558894,0.10463645702476253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242873182483486,0.13826468429710584,0.06770277700179117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04781226092156996,0.05366291341016997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347121308472697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670058240070964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607398931532901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04520157736607459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11245196735627824,0.0,0.07360789642932747,0.07971101340781186,0.0724272791065878,0.058366714536820026,0.07931070241135921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697841537480588,0.0,0.0,0.07520596542645974,0.05634810364993576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006894169476561,0.0,0.0,0.05305120561944895,0.11342448792235375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932336112256071,0.05601556197788903,0.12342967404528045,0.0,0.0,0.06742166377452079,0.0,0.09580917032498053,0.0,0.13785079021220467,0.0,0.0,0.06093988352208976,0.07771021160519756,0.11643629240811047,0.04161722727597357,0.056006047511925686,0.22639106823163346,0.0,0.06344055893686891,0.0,0.1273361305129235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273484649592557,0.0,0.0,0.050122729001592134,0.07714463563224791,0.0,0.09087471227544663
mentalhealth,Dexpos,2020/02/22,"Am I depressed At this point I feel numb. I dont wanna kill myself, but I see no point in life. Most days I just feel grey or on the reare occasion somewhat happy (yet Most of the time I put on a mask to mask my inner turmoil) Life just feels, meh. But the problem is I really have notning to be depressed about. Im only 15 and my homelife is somewhat stable. So why me? Akid who seemingly has it all, why do I feel like this? Is it just teenage hormones or am I dealing with something. I dont wanna say I am because I k ow people ahve it worst than me. What should I do.",0.42890243902439096,2.2028344308943097,2.7018089430894316,93.94832317073171,82.73983739837398,5.0756097560975615,22.445121951219512,5.985473137389443,0.2339219512195125,437,15,100,3,12,149,79,123,0.171,0.721,0.10800000000000001,-0.8489,0,0,1,0,0,2,15.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,1,1,4,0,14,3,0,0,1,23,20,6,1,4,7,0,4,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,0,7,18,2,12,18,6,11,0,2,2,0,3,7,0,7,4,72,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465612530253812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107210802342884,0.17699723192386402,0.2957399601328332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4024214796161135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472315435652898,0.12265009059120555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18275933032819816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18544667923532845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899413706107929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425290088154453,0.08387545101956909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057236090393848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902310462960082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245911175623128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16427707112979673,0.0,0.17258844168769952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10998427588450407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13652890197723222,0.0,0.0,0.1368088120167101,0.15629339981815027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321696605118123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010951028388453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098337032572194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheWall29,2020/02/22,"Anxiety about death/losing people Idk if this is the right place for this or if it can be called anxiety because I’m not a doctor but that’s what I believe it is... I think about losing people every day, mostly my family, like if they’re driving long distances for work I’ll worry about it until I know they’ve reached their destination. Almost every night over the past week or 2 right when I’m laying down to go to sleep I just randomly think of a stupid situation that would more than likely not happen (but still happens in everyday life like car crashes and shit), and it gives me anxiety to the point where I’ll have to get my phone and play on it or whatever for 20-30 minutes to get my mind off of it.
Is this abnormal?",6.1508108108108095,5.483628000000002,6.8533783783783795,78.8777702702703,66.29729729729729,10.102702702702704,29.986486486486484,9.516144504307137,2.4303621621621625,576,17,117,10,8,191,97,148,0.11900000000000001,0.807,0.075,-0.6808,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,7,7,2,0,5,0,7,4,2,0,0,22,18,13,0,4,11,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,12,3,0,0,3,1,0,3,2,3,0,0,0,0,9,4,20,16,2,22,0,1,0,0,4,10,1,9,12,72,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15353521273699305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35188505460724195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346694148165016,0.0,0.0,0.17274744015475474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565643875679281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888346904805913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15693706000167393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583698439813531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454339843741826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16021444470725954,0.14708558442950434,0.08713947767375946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27117377344124743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426471257120945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829965570111776,0.22472402402240327,0.0,0.0,0.13568989731993505,0.0,0.17153410715596049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15481693475289773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438873498529636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14636832380376438,0.2125957849714015,0.0,0.16019446734775702,0.0,0.14494392422305902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618814720426812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15738834170053545,0.0,0.17234638779207015,0.15343810096775173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224474355633583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19649197492796555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298996746913768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116241513163655,0.15571138669416287,0.0,0.10891936431101386,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OrangeAugust,2020/02/22,"I think my brother is delusional For a few weeks now, my brother is convinced that there are people creeping around his neighborhood every night and that they are targeting him specifically. He lives with my parents, but they have never seen these people. I have never seen anyone, either, but I only go to their house twice A week.  
He is convinced they come around as soon as it gets dark, creep around the neighborhood all night for seemingly no reason, and then taunt him in his car when he gets home really late. He has insomnia so he stays out really late and then doesn't go home until like 3 AM. or sometimes he'll be home, but he can't sleep so he'll go to the gas station for coffee in the middle of the night. But when he gets back home he sits in his car and smokes and/or texts people. This is when he supposedly saw these people- at around 3 AM one night. Now he supposedly sees them every night (idk why he still sits in his car texting when he gets home, tho). Tonight, they supposedly started early at like 8:00 PM. he got home from work and was texting us saying that he couldn't come in because the people were outside. me and my dad went to the windows that face the driveway and the side of the house, and we didn't see anything. Meanwhile my brother texted me and said that people kept popping out from behind the bushes towards him just apparently to freak him out because he knows they're around. I believed him until tonight. I'm really starting to doubt that there is a group of people trolling the neighborhood at night for the past 2+ weeks but they haven't done anything besides harassing my brother. They're supposedly professional levels of stealthy and according to him that's why he's the only one who has seen them.  
The ""photo evidence"" he's shown me is questionable. in one photo it was so dark he had to turn the contrast all the way up and you can see something that maybe looks like a distorted white face and a reflection that almost looks like this ""person"" is carrying a sword or something. Then another pic he sent me tonight was clearer because the motion light outside was on, and idk- it looks really creepy like it could be a person, but i don't actually see a face- it just looks like someone was maybe jumping at the back of his car to scare him, but like I said, I can't really see a face. It is super creepy, tho. so idk what to believe. If there really are people who are just randomly creeping around the neighborhood, when are they going to strike? But also, what if it's all in his head and he's hallucinating? The photos don't prove one way or another for me.  
Does this sound like a delusion?",5.345095759233928,6.202062825581398,5.5590560875513,82.23785909712724,68.03100775193798,8.628727770177838,28.74236206110351,8.757208317658263,2.0675834017327865,2102,70,409,33,34,666,212,516,0.061,0.868,0.071,0.8173,2,0,3,0,0,0,54.0,2,1,9,2,30,15,1,2,30,0,39,7,6,1,6,62,77,46,0,4,17,6,0,8,0,2,1,4,8,2,25,27,0,1,7,0,0,14,11,4,0,5,19,19,43,11,51,52,5,81,0,0,14,0,63,26,0,10,44,255,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.05721612109940447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871121887769019,0.0,0.0,0.0468877817780879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296098443821528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04099667628630495,0.0,0.09649785353832907,0.31316807873144703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016837880648744,0.0,0.10722409461647704,0.0,0.0,0.13211578749508338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101210584275692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04681267396427292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05130903131503404,0.06000062714360311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879954045049494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253065811930346,0.0,0.13328707741736218,0.0,0.04689315907258905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06017308111744914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3528744981954078,0.0,0.0,0.13530631321805675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03222247128356585,0.0,0.1322783144407252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22915605484466506,0.0,0.05177290113676307,0.0,0.1969435813051718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780692815690337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09044082577217663,0.0,0.0,0.3301315004038564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15892153933902795,0.08918416155377606,0.0,0.0,0.06510360934223179,0.0,0.05597063072641264,0.3251829320824705,0.1023899487277954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06568096798086917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253659662953101,0.06028319444369176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115444236961242,0.046626313434185065,0.058700600734618524,0.0,0.2336095309223751,0.05337613459185905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058674083746029615,0.0,0.04967848354672088,0.09027515680952708,0.057988290667246416,0.0,0.08299969555108426,0.062493634282722026,0.046823383784194664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037568851933227655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377449724918614,0.0,0.0,0.07052676481100101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307829321740543,0.14109253710176534,0.0,0.0,0.054352210946335806,0.10581205262278093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0426846054604939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thebiscuitbox,2020/02/22,"I'm lost I feel like I don't have/don't deserve a place on this planet. I always look at myself in such a negative light and it doesn't help that I always treat my friends and family like shit. When they point it out I just turn it back to them. I take medication and sometimes it feels like it is doing nothing. I keep procrastinating and forgetting to get counseling but I feel as if my family and friends assume the worst of me, like I'm trying to get out of it. I always feel like the butt of the joke even if it's completely a joke and it hurts me yet everyone acts like I'm overreacting. My girlfriend and I get in fights pretty often and it's like a weight bearing down on me that I can't take off. I'm always anxious about my appearance and I feel like I'm always doing something wrong. I've always had itching thoughts of suicide but it sometimes digs in a little deeper than usual and I'm feeling it right now. The only thing keeping me from wanting to fully do such a thing is my loving family and friends who I don't want to leave with such a weight. I feel like I'm good at nothing and do nothing good for anyone around me. I'm at a loss for some kind of drive. If anyone can offer some advice or support it'd be much appreciated because I feel like I'm at the lowest point mentally I've been at. I feel like such a worthless piece of shit all the time.",2.08327526132404,3.8096372299651584,3.853053658536584,87.88523902439026,77.397212543554,6.543219512195122,22.978257839721252,7.404127859558343,0.8591249895470385,1083,33,230,14,25,364,136,287,0.153,0.613,0.23399999999999999,0.9743,1,0,1,0,1,1,16.0,0,0,2,2,13,31,3,0,15,0,15,8,4,0,1,44,49,20,1,5,7,0,11,11,4,0,2,0,0,0,18,16,2,2,11,2,0,3,5,9,0,0,4,13,29,22,33,43,6,29,0,4,1,2,11,20,3,9,17,145,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230037443072497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3693844611407081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835855618156676,0.0,0.10346848468894973,0.0,0.0,0.0658651495164354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05689232864154794,0.0,0.04510249609274438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757517891916584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048868482411976916,0.0,0.0,0.0706988583410492,0.0,0.0,0.2092483596845482,0.0,0.3366957347812337,0.3700000980326093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17148920850444976,0.0,0.11596728081386465,0.0,0.0,0.12411551787550658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04959270458332403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079205856400057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152815374619573,0.0,0.07704728387226767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834277924421315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976156589064068,0.07415557451272374,0.0,0.0,0.062131420680766984,0.0,0.08076681762774973,0.0,0.06677720381613307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453528806057469,0.07456266388913545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05438981137771967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21298090728906668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05627133032554064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730188046272977,0.0,0.13988545409332764,0.0,0.0,0.07527255876146373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631854850620423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518955676534157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05695970092128756,0.146352365814754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080931039154975,0.08396088808083106,0.0,0.0,0.11125977796853777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830889281882607,0.0,0.0,0.0587383351204935,0.04314309156175069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05023310447538268,0.08047787271936943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148750615681273,0.0,0.08728026841850854,0.0,0.0,0.18019529466502526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089443898293827,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,softcloudboy,2020/02/22,Trouble with talking I have gone through a lot of constant trama and all untill I started going to high school I have trouble with talking when I talk I often lose my breathe fairly quickly I don't think this is asthma since I'm very good at like running and all and I feel all fine and dandy I was wondering if anyone would know what this is,2.9069047619047623,4.7625580714285745,3.6257142857142886,89.84761904761906,75.42857142857143,5.238095238095238,27.380952380952376,5.46131890053228,0.8676666666666666,275,11,54,1,6,87,51,70,0.11800000000000001,0.77,0.113,-0.0883,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,1,0,7,2,1,0,3,17,15,7,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,2,1,9,3,7,12,4,10,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,4,6,39,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16778938760517126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25931734882797064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133371672017455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637786719196218,0.20127159298056327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253536620797245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13187870855766945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723497363506907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26845990255059704,0.0,0.2040100023853143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428577965950876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19850185914841734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984874567239314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5786252979343502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15376013935576954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979965867427591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26023224076194834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704645356752405,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gnosiscna,2020/02/22,I’m so tired. I try to do things right. I try to stand up for people that don’t have a voice. I try to be good. But it doesn’t seem to do anything. I’m tired. I’m tired of being accused of things. I’m tired of getting beaten down. I’m tired of trying to keep myself together. I’m just so. freaking. tired. I just want to sleep...,-2.7353326403326403,-1.213665364864866,0.1840540540540552,103.88163201663204,108.05405405405406,2.817463617463618,12.44906444906445,4.713530739802397,-1.613516424116424,249,5,64,1,13,85,39,74,0.33899999999999997,0.61,0.051,-0.9738,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,0,1,0,7,7,1,0,0,6,17,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,5,1,13,15,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,35,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406736393976873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607112036547033,0.0,0.0,0.10607023718100572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240514242411223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876727546239821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10799776694563247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512615919612625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655322378969186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680313268926509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8720960667401609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3434373008143295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459050190371094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GollyGeeYowza,2020/02/22,"Weird Sensory Distortions I get these really weird sensory effects fairly often where my body suddenly feels much larger, and I feel like parts of my body are twisting and folding in on themselves, when really they’re completely still. The majority of the time this happens at night, but sometimes it happens during the day. Sometimes I’ll focus on something like a wall near me and I can see it start slowly drifting toward me. Does anyone have any idea what this could be, and if it’s a cause for concern? Thanks!",5.930977443609022,7.704745526315794,5.974436090225566,76.40105263157895,67.42105263157895,8.796992481203008,31.46616541353384,9.23628265651192,3.0039323308270682,415,17,68,8,7,131,72,95,0.03,0.872,0.09699999999999999,0.8072,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,5,0,5,2,2,2,0,13,13,7,0,2,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,7,3,9,11,3,16,0,0,1,0,0,8,0,2,9,45,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12688108053232294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13046136460213026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41449755975243396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19166948247392396,0.0,0.0,0.1956260156215401,0.0,0.0,0.1489692794460462,0.0,0.0,0.12032893246843455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16327777878932276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886813281995008,0.13329308598477846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748056618178473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.329984890151494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106265782495044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182307532768592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371580734775677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750930804733849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20204840766227397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390563834365073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14868043436183398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363871920729912,0.3690656031996977,0.0,0.13206257828726736,0.0,0.14900336068989814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17177817855682395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087965406127526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AggravatingMolasses8,2020/02/22,"I don’t know anymore Some days I feel fine but most days I always go back to feeling horrible. I feel guilty when there’s no reason to be. I overthink everything I say and do. I obsess over every single thing someone says to me until my stomach hurts. I’m at the point where many times I don’t even have the energy to cry. A single thing can make me feel like shit for a week. The worst part is that nobody takes me seriously. The things I use to love just seem pointless now. I’m not suicidal or anything, I just don’t want to do anything anymore but then I feel horrible since I’m wasting all my time doing nothing. I don’t know what to do with myself anymore and I just feel sick and tired most of the time. Even on my good days, there’s always fear and sadness lurking  in the back of my mind. Thoughts like “they don’t actually like me they’re all friends with me for pity” or “their lives would be better if they had never met me” . I just really wish I didn’t feel like this anymore. Help pls",1.0277054195804176,3.20401894711539,2.5068881118881134,93.92902097902099,83.08653846153847,5.320279720279721,20.512237762237767,6.574015621080383,0.1801750000000002,783,23,172,8,22,254,117,208,0.244,0.5579999999999999,0.198,-0.9449,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,3,1,13,17,1,2,8,0,17,5,2,3,3,40,39,12,1,4,10,0,7,4,1,1,2,2,0,0,6,6,0,0,12,0,0,1,9,8,0,0,4,9,29,9,18,32,9,21,0,3,0,1,9,6,1,7,18,113,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.104702034069734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17855196325054296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4256214454068072,0.0,0.0,0.17658522379161234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650026686256401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489152549308023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785580830079785,0.20758442109444888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417314109335419,0.0,0.09039858567439182,0.0,0.09642760947299196,0.0,0.0,0.12073392756666222,0.3797522956103371,0.1532996125560591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289394405003779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060976818476397826,0.08999188535743996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191592255054542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148588745517119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793033925810995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096708462633068,0.0,0.0947412714205605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683569908380923,0.0,0.07161859823070033,0.10877778718964333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833487162779423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275061503069872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295007812161006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618735654350593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142612272356676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687343433628175,0.1103145924119891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064665566023327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767509148056704,0.0,0.0,0.110134242232953,0.0887534911767114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090861416146627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173606156934914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067063132171626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21384117224671104,0.0,0.0,0.08517828569272712,0.1876894146476488,0.12331698213142235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09266629888985167,0.0,0.0,0.06328391521005004,0.0,0.08606359736124558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123381116718551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621753633895519,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RandomHero533,2020/02/22,"Drowning in my own mind I just wanted to get my feelings off my chest.
Ever feel like your drowning in bad thoughts?
I’ve had bad anxiety issues for as long as I can remember.  But I find the older I get it is getting worse.
It’s kinda hard to explain but it’s like a dark cloud that comes around every other day and I just want to lay in bed and weep.
Nothing is fun and I just feel so stupid for feeling this way. 
I’ve tried medication and therapy but I don’t really know how to express myself.
I’m not suicidal but I fear I could get to that place before I get better. I’m just very scared and feel very alone.
I try to explain it to my wife but it’s hard. I just want to get it all off my chest, I appreciate anyone who takes the time to read my ramblings. I’m not great at expressing myself. I’m sure there are people who feel like I do and I want to say I know what you feel like and I hope you get what you need.
32/M/Canada",0.1199369747899155,1.992330279411764,2.427983193277313,94.9573529411765,84.44117647058823,5.454341736694678,18.537815126050425,6.655083550727371,-0.10459495798319328,723,18,172,8,21,246,107,204,0.162,0.6579999999999999,0.18,0.4742,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,4,0,1,10,15,1,2,3,0,8,3,2,1,3,48,39,16,3,7,12,1,9,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,14,9,0,0,14,1,0,1,3,6,0,0,2,10,29,9,21,36,2,15,0,1,0,0,12,8,0,2,9,100,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465181401018752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468519654533556,0.0,0.0,0.07740401348692183,0.0,0.0,0.09854646923292132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848597511216394,0.0,0.0,0.0941975460531413,0.0,0.0,0.09790515353338268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535824743928087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838494178368042,0.0,0.0,0.07139234163354392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100134487156079,0.0932695239502434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456827576203686,0.3918127210326683,0.2372523050807661,0.0,0.0,0.10117779395626808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4048532650046424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204714014895683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19833091154150045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099500773571688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554203861568775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167564923541176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163297121446348,0.0,0.0,0.09796601594728778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151860316957908,0.0,0.0,0.11177544237616832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208264688394974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621963502425713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674544115737436,0.0,0.1156579380840315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072995639664317,0.0,0.07091725425410744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125401519650279,0.0,0.0,0.08803308269921195,0.11083001117509246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210878320117374,0.0,0.10433343935820387,0.0,0.0832326227673881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659509691983048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788343421736765,0.06455005987866567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15031606611390655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18267818590129567,0.26117491114779634,0.087868506866573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281275675887127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FieryGhosts,2020/02/22,I just threw ice water at a coworker for making fun of bipolar disorder He deserved it for making fun of a series condition. But now I feel bad I did that.,4.526875,4.766922937500002,6.875000000000004,74.27000000000002,69.625,10.15,31.625,10.125756701596842,3.2905125,122,5,23,3,2,44,25,32,0.17300000000000001,0.642,0.184,0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,2,0,5,5,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,3,2,5,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41496590962326063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5695936231499477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512930883297438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6634893986154978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaymybroccoli,2020/02/22,"Is what I'm experiencing ""normal""? I'm not looking for a diagnosis or anything, but I'm wondering if what I'm feeling is normal. 

For the past few months, and much more so in the past week and a half, I have cried more times than I  probably have in the last 3 years, over what seems like nothing. I've had **\*fleeting\*** thoughts of suicide. Not like mulling over killing myself for an hour, but like, when I'm driving for example, especially if I'm upset, it will cross my mind ""what if I just swerved into oncoming traffic?"", or ""what if I just crash into this ditch/stop sign etc"". Today I felt like I really wanted to, **but I also feel like I never actually would.** I know I'm not alone, but I feel alone. I feel like everyone is out to get me. I am in my head, way too much, all the time. I'm constantly paranoid about what people think of me. Idk what's going on, but it's like I feel like a completely different person. I don't feel comfortable in my own skin. I'm also easily irritated and envious beyond belief lately. 

What I need to know is, is it normal for people to feel this way from time to time? Is it just a phase? I made an appointment with a doctor on Tuesday, but ended up leaving before seeing the doctor due to an insurance issue. I don't know if I can be seen again anytime soon. I'm also afraid I'm just being overdramatic or that there's nothing wrong with me and it's actually all in my head and it'll pass at some point. I'm not sure. 

If it matters, I'm 25/F/USA enrolled in graduate school with a terminally ill parent (diagnosed with ALS when I was 19). 

Any advice is appreciated. I have no idea what I'm doing.",0.901858208356728,3.1441251157270087,3.4737348624589015,86.3801812494988,84.19287833827894,6.6106022936883475,21.571016119977546,7.824948511530503,1.1090032721148448,1272,42,267,25,37,443,171,337,0.136,0.738,0.126,-0.8074,2,2,0,0,0,2,63.0,0,0,0,0,16,15,2,2,14,0,22,7,3,1,4,67,59,26,2,12,23,1,9,8,0,3,4,0,0,1,19,12,0,0,17,0,0,4,8,5,0,1,6,13,28,10,36,48,10,45,1,0,3,0,2,17,0,12,30,169,47,4,0.0,0.0,0.17371256725069278,0.0,0.0,0.0869748989773045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18436519026737289,0.0,0.21353239582279235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060526621274792324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324373598833044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573691114587977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332030992599542,0.09618305421241363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977680863950627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033845394258964,0.0,0.09299154114953556,0.0,0.18220128715621495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883223224124862,0.0,0.0992643798390206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504832942345603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31502609656026165,0.19075610248827626,0.08545899669361401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046501568919364175,0.0,0.05058373399536695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18269012647914493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765224128359674,0.0,0.0,0.10047609209054202,0.0,0.09289835541271334,0.0,0.0,0.0984711205249178,0.0,0.14674487108550802,0.07255115710926241,0.1004017973936542,0.09424370709027848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34786774971120554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474199241117166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421891843075867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986992870025999,0.0,0.07104314039823457,0.0,0.13085819782315006,0.0659962641719053,0.06864633484093763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616187385346229,0.17080587333435454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988297956836066,0.0,0.16993116218475787,0.12341006536429988,0.07771595012212945,0.0,0.0,0.08413872911418296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09596271200728852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057019041463384136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007806350553392,0.07092565971092762,0.0810270356650134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441237335207376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735729600372477,0.0,0.08388639361962244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057030969529058624,0.0,0.07066022553029745,0.20759870524583326,0.0,0.08436656871106503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0524976017633584,0.14129644721998236,0.07139464183902412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652239556725163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322677503163293,0.09731326723775348,0.0,0.05731646204780196
mentalhealth,Jcyte17,2020/02/22,"Home alone, no support system after step dad passing last September Right now, I'm having a particularly hard time because there's literally no one I can talk to or even just be with and hangout... I stopped drinking, so I'm not going to get blacked out drunk tonight. My brother's aren't texting me back, I don't blame them. One is in high school and is out with friends as I write this, my other brother left to San Fransisco in early January without telling me anything... we weren't really talking after a fight we go into while drunk. 

It was all my fault and I probably pushed him to move there but I know im not the sole reason but only part of it. Regardless, I don't have my brother to hangout with anymore and I don't even know when I'll see him again, I never even been to San Francisco and I can't afford to visit. I'm the worst person. 

My younger step brother won't text me back either... I almost killed myself in January but after being in suicidal ideation for about two weeks, I just decided to not do it. But I'm having a hard time tonight. I'm very disappointed on myself and what I've become and the people I've pushed away... absolutely no one is close anymore after my dad died... it all fell apart.",2.757025255446308,4.5365404534412965,4.2845922498554065,85.29342780026991,75.63967611336031,6.9719683824946985,26.741661846925005,7.793537801064563,1.5761248891459418,960,37,193,14,21,320,140,247,0.172,0.8059999999999999,0.022000000000000002,-0.9876,1,1,1,0,1,0,32.0,2,0,1,0,16,7,2,0,6,0,19,3,0,1,3,39,31,16,3,1,12,6,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,7,16,3,1,4,5,0,10,15,5,0,4,3,4,28,2,29,25,5,44,0,1,2,0,19,14,0,2,19,131,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345397211618869,0.13915394589377791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26649325796656365,0.0,0.0,0.11056485077250502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623338111084664,0.2066253907539634,0.0,0.08190314143985138,0.14838740518274102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394419688807874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316192903634165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662257684392048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380434282148747,0.0,0.07019629677377487,0.0,0.15271703239181866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24071602505353565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419561734174383,0.13477162031347098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512925598052406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486467695745823,0.0,0.14767883837224166,0.10951937050884747,0.0,0.0,0.14597991757933798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142800857943698,0.0,0.0,0.10362485836299966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27313254601943765,0.10218500362339744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454961798280967,0.0,0.09314663757050068,0.11731586752027112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448602094041351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607291429801968,0.13814198250760584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474065003720675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359770568086858,0.10706560603530102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232896362100912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14696539927976165,0.1524674039715971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21598308725316384,0.11743445805897505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15668998554175215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124784513332774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11085908503211143,0.0,0.0,0.10777355652838104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951592478830504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,worldsbestcowboy,2020/02/22,"I need help I need to do some serious self reflection and I need help.

I’ve been living too fast, wasting money partying, acquiring addictions, ruining relationships.

I’m an overall positive and happy person. I may be a little crazy, brutally honest and self centered which has made me generally well liked but I think I hate my life and my character.

I may be severely depressed but I think I have just buried it so deep down that it feels normal. nothing makes me happy, really. I know I have severe anxiety and PTSD from an event last year and I’d rather not speak about it.

I need a reset button. Or to be dropped somewhere new in a new life and start over. I hate everyone and everything. Ive learned that I can’t trust anyone or anything. I know what I want and what I can do yet I can’t get to it. No support, mentor or guidance has left me lost and confused.

I won’t kill myself, I promise I have no interest in that, I’m desperate to push through this endless, dark tunnel.",1.8837802197802205,4.321205964102564,3.764761904761905,84.61,81.66666666666666,7.406593406593408,25.695970695970693,8.418075326091056,2.076750915750916,773,32,150,18,21,260,119,195,0.24100000000000002,0.5920000000000001,0.166,-0.9625,0,0,0,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,0,2,8,18,4,1,5,0,18,3,0,2,0,38,38,16,1,7,8,0,1,1,0,3,3,1,0,3,11,10,0,0,7,0,1,1,6,9,1,0,3,2,28,9,11,29,1,18,0,3,0,0,7,8,0,7,9,97,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126953963136424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913410862591153,0.0,0.0,0.09061061666174616,0.0,0.1066394987069199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161355293672416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382644185467735,0.11646491948659787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06552335073626432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06770413785878372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27589667870523205,0.0,0.2558817219862033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737195845760253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14336940610947246,0.0,0.14243583908994306,0.10563113582807138,0.0,0.0,0.14079723459283408,0.0,0.18306301489968094,0.06330992327353706,0.12988075268916302,0.11442816645935805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14146010107440524,0.0,0.0,0.12261885773448244,0.08650068504516571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3843500571266729,0.0,0.25031289522326244,0.0,0.0,0.12696826904130035,0.1243427336330528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315083605069375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148089226901798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830170924019105,0.0,0.0,0.13912851447221347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703761193948975,0.29279405503635475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172272337517796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14705439762344275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660689182298787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643408490593663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165147556829224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345012304404607
mentalhealth,Redpanda219,2020/02/22,"How do I talk tona doctor if I think I have depression? For a while now I have thought that I possibly could have depression and maybe anxiety but I end up telling myself that I am making it up and that I can 'fix' myself on my own.

Im a first year at uni and more and more I feel like I am wasting my uni experience and that my lifestyle and decisions are not normal. I'm fed up of second guessing what's wrong in my life. I just want some direction and confirmation.

Reading about symptoms of depression online I think I might be depressed and at this point I can't stand repeating my everyday indecisiveness.

However, I am unaware about how people ask for help or even know if they are depressed. It feels strange or fake for me to diagnose myself and I doubt myself alot. How do people know when they are depressed? What do I say to the doctor?

I know this is a bit of a drag so thanks for reading :)",2.657554945054944,4.568303587912087,4.147348901098901,85.58827609890113,76.30769230769229,7.626923076923077,26.21016483516484,8.472884824447931,1.8162956043956044,711,27,146,14,16,236,104,182,0.243,0.67,0.087,-0.9849,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,1,10,12,0,2,6,0,18,6,0,4,0,38,33,20,0,5,7,0,2,1,0,1,5,1,0,0,10,9,1,0,9,2,0,0,2,10,0,2,2,3,30,2,18,28,6,17,0,6,0,0,7,8,0,10,9,112,40,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943325480091744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527910322015325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462363266846222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845376883117538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6372453025593288,0.12515803021878338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524279883989465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921691123178316,0.0,0.0,0.08144572707891361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062178183803983,0.0,0.0,0.12469945440019925,0.08809337551432762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10488824083469184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358409262621847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265273819120425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319699865704174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20330543869439388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709817882608502,0.06024350709799069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231102430790166,0.0,0.12388243491840015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308134434521885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081856084646975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709765887734021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656871621618843,0.1390145812473153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24668866233895426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980618259021616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128167303893337,0.0,0.09911267989503103,0.1077792154772076,0.1135281659733018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802537006578793,0.0,0.0978951294407497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273199995306137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134821178690654,0.0,0.07940821627932003
mentalhealth,ocdhelp4321,2020/02/22,"Did I experience serotonin syndrome or a panic attack? I hope this is an appropriate subreddit, but I am on Fluvoxamine (Luvox) for OCD and was prescribed Vistaril as an anti-anxiety med to go a long with it, switching from buspirone that I had taken for anxiety before as I didn’t find a whole lot of relief from that. I’ve experienced insomnia and restless leg syndrome after taking visatril before bed, so I discontinued that but the insomnia has lasted for about 4 days. Yesterday I took some of my buspirone before bed to help me sleep to see if that would work, I didn’t have any problems but I still couldn’t sleep. Desperate for sleep again today I took one of my buspirones this afternoon and about 15 minutes later I felt like my head weighed 100lbs and was swirling, I couldn’t think a coherent thought. Everything was static and confusion. I remember my head rolling back while I was sitting on the couch and I was holding my eyes open super wide. Then I began to not be able to breathe, the only way I could get air was to gasp, I truly thought that I was dying. This episode probably lasted 10-15 minutes but I barely remember anything. My breathing began to go back to normal and my head lightened up, but I felt physically drained. I’m experiencing pretty bad anxiety in the hours after. From what I’ve read it sounded like either a panic attack or serotonin syndrome; I don’t have experience with either so I was hoping to get some opinions",5.073602484472048,6.830837623188407,5.9958592132505135,75.48413043478263,69.5072463768116,8.735403726708075,32.70807453416149,9.23628265651192,3.1731378881987578,1168,54,200,24,21,385,150,276,0.129,0.754,0.11800000000000001,-0.0213,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,8,14,2,4,11,0,23,13,10,0,0,43,42,21,1,9,11,0,2,2,0,1,2,1,3,0,11,10,1,1,8,1,0,4,6,8,0,1,21,7,31,6,31,16,6,32,0,0,2,0,1,7,0,10,21,138,42,2,0.10189651862569783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929312684598524,0.0,0.2338516735368679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385215268288819,0.0,0.0,0.23184400039155725,0.0,0.15670426625286374,0.08507933683203127,0.0,0.0,0.2601192969517479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135607872743668,0.0,0.0,0.06571482482491256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575249894790242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157802061532737,0.19934869524978252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956732747772744,0.0,0.09313157201280617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647345071643048,0.0,0.1158202794823546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137256757689036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829908854837638,0.0,0.0,0.20241246911607336,0.1003475453556946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611852525423734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956298401710477,0.0,0.0,0.09017521248729818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662877628157957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318406126735288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983695357377258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904771812340221,0.07749689404782681,0.0,0.23910721955168426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366539190203383,0.1098616812826318,0.09750120689936273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192409327076447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308577841274779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119833275794157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059103212184777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813746913995813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661350082831604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529117473425561,0.0,0.16178890767444795,0.0,0.0,0.09658598520996688,0.0,0.2264215629045992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088071359254052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376382411112552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418187914118766,0.0,0.0,0.07238436327775254,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,enduranceeats,2020/02/22,"Sister with mental issues harming niece. Need advice! Hi, I have been facing a very tricky problem for a long time now and I'm not sure how to fix it. My sister has a lot of mental instability and substance use issues and has a 12 year old daughter that is enduring psychological damage and often is being put in very risky situations. Telling all of the details of the drama she has caused would be TLDR; but basically she has been in rehab several times for alcohol, has mixed prescription drugs, makes money as a ""sugar baby"", has been diagnosed as a narcissist and manic depressive, and has been in trouble with the law multiple times. However what is more unsettling is the ""end of the world"" conspiracies she believes in and has been pushing on other people such as these: [https://www.youtube.com/user/XtremeRealityCheck/featured](https://www.youtube.com/user/XtremeRealityCheck/featured). My parents and I suspect she may be a paranoid schizophrenic, but we can't convince her to seek help. Anywho, I already had her baker acted and child services has been called numerous times. It hasn't been enough to save my niece. If anyone has any advice or ideas and has dealt with a similar situation, please let me know. At this point we are just waiting for her to unravel again so we have something substantial enough for authorities.",9.936997957794418,10.80381214159292,9.046637168141595,61.166606535057895,58.115044247787615,11.024642614023143,35.08373042886317,10.727762888450028,3.952548400272295,1088,40,162,23,13,342,144,226,0.10800000000000001,0.836,0.055,-0.8184,2,0,3,0,0,0,45.0,3,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,13,0,34,7,1,4,2,41,40,19,0,4,6,4,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,7,16,2,1,3,1,1,3,3,5,0,0,8,1,17,3,24,26,5,21,0,2,0,0,19,8,0,6,10,122,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25683091611354736,0.0,0.14044074542387924,0.0,0.0,0.1450177339239478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936548230610206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918871649032933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805767505528852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418757000969966,0.0,0.0,0.1349975557646647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318599654193752,0.1333816317073914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15239759099429934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639308963772987,0.2715699289899368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808349784472831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483495070563795,0.0,0.2743224770208124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222125793191975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437890044972506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629654660979613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172280320381174,0.0,0.0,0.08771933139650047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648671936389742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744122262082232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378960472516331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14591880682355715,0.0,0.0,0.09110536636960227,0.0,0.0,0.14425223088478292,0.12422795043811455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12574468459700386,0.0,0.13210656250354724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484595106457749,0.0,0.0,0.295427885447236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116830157764137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385538572692788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486092901400592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.306512374715069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134988115157162,0.0,0.21685930529923936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335216680456733,0.0,0.0,0.08462579220681588
mentalhealth,hannahtinker,2020/02/22,"Weird Question - Why do I sometimes lose my ability to speak? So I’m not sure where to even ask this because I have no evidence if this is mental health related or not. But sometimes I lose my ability to speak. I’ll be mid sentence, then I won’t be able to say whatever comes next. Even if I know the words. I’ll just sit there humming or mumbling letters for a solid 30 seconds +. Sometimes I’m just silent and frustrated or I’ll give up on the sentence as a whole and walk away. 

It’s not something I ever remember experiencing as a child and have noticed it much more as I’ve gotten older. I’ll slur words, lose the ability to even say words, or become really overwhelmed while speaking that I’ll say multiple words at once (i.e. instead of saying “hey look at that cat” I’ll say CATLOOKHEYAT) 

I know this isn’t very serious but I’m just curious if it’s something I should talk to my doctor about or if it’s just normal maybe caused by stress rather than anything underlying? It’s starting to become very frustrating.

Thanks all!",3.423095374071959,5.21984533009709,4.601901770416905,83.65209308966307,73.85436893203884,7.953854940034268,28.62250142775557,8.671277953709913,2.238983209594517,822,34,161,16,17,270,118,206,0.11199999999999999,0.8029999999999999,0.085,-0.7381,0,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,14,11,2,2,6,0,9,2,0,1,3,37,21,20,0,7,19,0,0,0,0,2,2,8,0,1,10,4,0,0,4,0,0,2,6,9,0,1,1,10,11,2,21,16,4,17,0,4,1,0,15,8,0,10,6,95,21,1,0.11359220993961465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093476710096758,0.0,0.10619338247234626,0.0,0.10672362046516272,0.0,0.0,0.06924475685441467,0.2509073427832382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669049002229412,0.0,0.09784963072132934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626644018726205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22507975005440636,0.1027506571671313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896799840840046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074320735460214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248546157797636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538884742015792,0.38124188148123495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411864271507753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144742304462216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350334439280721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080660394630527,0.0,0.11129624783101733,0.0,0.1293254839003495,0.0,0.1209719963370057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272492719308721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277007838208825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867783038364386,0.0,0.0,0.4516654230072277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17489766564956175,0.3370368005266985,0.0,0.08040115085115522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301194926978128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705931355950103,0.0,0.0,0.09130111555302453,0.0,0.10458044531768364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18745093907756635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249930133247878,0.12682164578589758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lightsaberrr,2020/02/22,"I can't feel nostalgia anymore. I've got a litany of aliments in my brain, which has caused me to turn to alcoholism and drug abuse. What really did me in, though, is frequently realizing I can't feel nostalgia anymore. About a damn thing. I was raised in a pretty bad neighborhood, did bad things, but even in those times I used to feel nostalgic. My one shining light, though, was Star Wars. I force myself to stay interested in Star Wars to a nerd level, but I just can't feel the same way about it. I feel nothing about it. I remember every memory, the *good* ones, with dread. My brain is pretty complex, it always has been, but what was once inquisition and imagination turned into delusion. Once I overcame that delusion, it became insecurity. My brain refuses to feel good about my life, even though I had it *very* good socially, even if I didn't financially. I over-read the faces of pictures and assume they think too positively of me or too negatively of me. I can't even watch shows anymore. I just browse Reddit and YouTube (with extensions that remove all pictures) and get drunk in-between. I still play video games, but can only get drunk for games that have pictures in the splash screens. I know that my favorite game (Star Wars Battlefront II, which I am very good at) would have been God's grace if I were just a few years younger, but now I feel like it's a hex on my very existence. Maybe substances did it to me, I don't know what to do, but substances are the only thing that bring me to even enjoy those things again, even if minimally.

I used to feel genuine magic about this world, but now I overthink myself into condemnation. I don't know what to do. I'm drunk right now, but maybe someone can lighten me up with similar experiences? I chant ""pictures can't see me... pictures can't see me... pictures can't judge me..."" to myself frequently everyday. And while I wouldn't trade my lifestyle in for anything else, considering it's the only thing I know nowadays, I want these insecurities to stop. NOW.

And to anybody else experiencing this or any other mental ailment, just know that YOU are the pilot of your own life, that YOU are in control. There is no external force behind this, but if there is, they're a fucking BITCH. And they have NO control. Stay strong people.",4.845188356164382,6.295309691780826,5.265933219178084,81.68739297945207,69.662100456621,8.488698630136986,28.52768264840183,8.930421266530582,2.183184703196348,1807,65,350,33,32,576,199,438,0.156,0.738,0.106,-0.9746,0,0,2,0,1,0,78.0,0,3,2,3,28,22,6,3,14,0,39,12,4,5,1,63,66,27,3,7,19,0,8,1,0,2,4,0,0,0,33,13,4,4,19,9,1,2,14,12,0,2,12,15,53,10,43,52,4,34,0,0,5,1,10,16,3,7,14,238,86,1,0.0,0.09159844165283712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261973615290957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432722372894283,0.0,0.0,0.05257272415511022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300090582378667,0.0,0.0,0.06361866311225757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909945647312754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589070039752334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941756792091098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17341707978499796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965381606517145,0.0,0.12916338366587474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30637091907236563,0.0,0.06513610872255615,0.0,0.0,0.07562296899476087,0.0,0.0,0.31271774732798496,0.055229515794326486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147086102287313,0.0807814513378673,0.0,0.0,0.25937225389359303,0.06183101447170707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124348335291548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921116860483948,0.037769238689610136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533442454711294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790921925102809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418000438279486,0.0,0.0,0.16466297697073404,0.1047730649104558,0.1763907772285899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053596278692856214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730195189518384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732985195189078,0.0,0.049526080843566335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757594841238621,0.06602140471403553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12321041766310313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880671946956998,0.06550360640781135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16480206845280532,0.06173901220630621,0.06463372802861067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568030930445259,0.0495364414236417,0.22786689673448285,0.0,0.04507945940141474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817983434369452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354018924913608,0.0,0.19136389370530926,0.0455988105428794,0.0613642310386729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05491804652145029,0.0,0.0,0.04978441692797555
mentalhealth,BearBoobs,2020/02/22,"How to keep work and my personal life separate? I just started working in health care at a specialist clinic about six months ago. Many of our patients are in very bad shape, some are just finding out they have cancer, some are getting amputations, and so on.

Most patients I can work with and move on and put it out of my head. But there are some patients that I am so so sad for or scared for and I know that I need to be able to draw boundaries, but I can't seem to get to that point.

I work with trauma surgeons who will come back from a trauma to see normal office visits and just say ""yeah, he didn't make it"" or ""she's not gonna last long"". I know it's experience, and not indifference, with these statements because they are all wonderful surgeons and people.

But, like everybody else, I have my own issues in my personal life. And then I pile on all this emotion with certain patients that resonate with me in a certain way. Sometimes it takes me weeks to cope with a single visit with a patient.

Is this abnormal? Is this not the field for me or will it get easier? I'm new to health care, so I don't know if the problem is within me or there just takes some time to be able to compartmentalize my work life?

Thanks for reading.",4.680527108433734,5.179835112449801,5.217527610441766,85.37400225903616,69.36144578313254,8.152710843373494,28.413905622489963,8.07648339933343,1.6473712851405615,969,32,204,12,16,311,134,249,0.079,0.8059999999999999,0.114,0.8769,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,0,2,5,13,12,0,1,7,1,19,11,1,2,4,56,40,23,0,4,15,0,0,1,0,3,10,1,0,2,14,19,0,1,7,1,0,5,6,6,0,1,1,2,24,6,36,34,9,29,0,1,1,0,11,13,0,12,11,143,38,6,0.2367815191006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494626505166754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103518626871994,0.09885133903917044,0.07216990815856124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414145393840749,0.0,0.0,0.10198315631831477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890028803381927,0.13317366953349685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11580888024584075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820700939952327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855628563998937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121503075033565,0.25168768240092954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235691940855295,0.0,0.10523114681512163,0.0,0.0,0.19519339578900216,0.09650427043767988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508686841032861,0.057839744968022425,0.0,0.0,0.10477209666207883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790267513191395,0.1200296480195178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449837475931873,0.12583064118888498,0.0,0.08778524808268025,0.0,0.1143425333131978,0.0,0.0,0.11599780762093752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207724588535666,0.2067484893896951,0.0,0.0,0.111917535050329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328396786831295,0.0,0.11901541309525625,0.0,0.0,0.1184227977712108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414908385154117,0.11852980374484184,0.0,0.09434210725827803,0.10777850104863038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709148843912982,0.0,0.08379758896359761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17803023454001266,0.0,0.0,0.1089983050937303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903460396704816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976847755123681,0.0,0.0939730742947703,0.09496592609072067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838972852061606,0.4309494148987968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AccomplishedPrize3,2020/02/22,"My last chance. If anyone reads this: this is my last last chance.

Seriously, my last chance. I made it serious.

Nothing, my last chancel. Im sorry but seriously, my last chancexd. 

Seriously, im drunk, this is me, my honest me.

Im fed up with is. what is this? im drunk sooo drunk, drunk 3 80% percent shot but its still me, my honest me. i dont care if one of my friends find this. im done. seriouslyl. if i give up im done for really:

i was crying when being drunk like really drunk so i know this is how i feel. this is a thorwaway because i feel ashamed eventho noone would recognsie me

im balding, im 20 years old, i feel like shit, and feel like shit especially becaouse of all the oppurtinuties in fornt of me. im done, i wasted enough of my parents. im crying why im wrinting this, im done. i marked my self that im serious, because i knew that it wouildnt count when i wake up, so i made it serious permanemtly.

im shit, all i know is that i MUST work out, MUST. nothing else. I can make my self something.

i know its all in my head but still, its sooo sooo hard, soo hard to workout. i dont see , the results when i workout but fuck its soo soo hard. im not sure if someone understand me but hell. hell.",-0.4003375843961017,1.7022062480620193,2.1999924981245336,94.11316204051016,89.23255813953489,5.499574893723432,21.11327831957989,6.968188349444268,0.4624657164291071,924,33,218,14,31,318,108,258,0.299,0.61,0.091,-0.9961,1,0,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,0,1,11,21,6,1,3,0,19,14,6,5,6,35,36,16,0,7,10,1,7,3,1,3,0,0,0,2,19,3,7,0,10,9,0,0,3,13,0,1,9,8,38,8,13,23,5,20,2,0,1,1,5,6,6,4,17,119,57,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03597616230696735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272884829655673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05245834588127544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303435610389766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106114442608295,0.12060180841370625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04298121836963477,0.0,0.0,0.05316326743411907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406192068128307,0.07351408151232296,0.0,0.0,0.04702583978861268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03975138657016495,0.047566184742209305,0.0,0.04935707302511956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827161039869135,0.0,0.052804196068812016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8336485257235355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848293785135265,0.2516395778260523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540997377270889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736951563233448,0.034344349475799875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873841568861716,0.0,0.0539898100309784,0.0,0.034864942790763964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05713092447077076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146553394472403,0.0,0.06592243824259353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04100027203290808,0.0,0.10735050167013578,0.0,0.1584430161136351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04359478253211151,0.03960996339051265,0.0,0.05759586544663273,0.0,0.0,0.08217864506954338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048492533904964386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05356294097347181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04642707560737282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037457385162918064,0.0,0.0,0.03654974781519062,0.0,0.0,0.033133150195593666
mentalhealth,nicocarina,2020/02/22,"I’m so fucking stupid I broke up with my girlfriend yesterday because of my poor mental health and because I felt I didn’t deserve her. Today I wanted to make her hate me so I told her I never loved her and was only with her for attention. I’m so stupid and I never should have done it. I deserve to be treated like shit for what I’ve done. 

I’m going to have to face her Monday and I’m so fucking scared. I don’t know what to do. I regret everything.",-0.3810544217687095,1.7557270510204075,2.164387755102041,94.09073129251705,89.71428571428572,4.491156462585034,19.391156462585034,5.985473137389443,-0.06402312925170063,353,11,78,3,12,121,53,98,0.297,0.679,0.024,-0.9828,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,12,6,1,0,0,10,6,2,1,2,15,24,8,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,1,1,4,9,0,0,6,1,19,3,11,16,0,7,0,2,0,3,9,1,3,0,6,53,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528954466617425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42454689281566815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18642518154444784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19916583438168686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835323575368842,0.0,0.0,0.11788754814718515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20479469992109192,0.0,0.22048894921758055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11399839229629155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134007726843773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18721414831650413,0.0,0.13846148680950918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20904118199752733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199664186289624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776026217778835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20767414304395612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129244540516078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19661988440492412,0.19820875680438396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234789855680699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nothing_is_solid,2020/02/22,"So just would like some input, ya or nah on a doctors visit? So last night I had something like a seizure (or what ive heard of seizures described). And it was pretty intense for me and very scary. Basically I got really high right after doing some yoga and started shaking. Which at first was no big deal sometimes I get tremors from getting to high. Then I noticed there were times every single muscle in my body tensed up really tight and my arms and legs started getting pulled towards each other. I felt like I was fighting to hold conciousness for the duration of it which was probably about 4 or 5 minutes. But yea after that i told my mom and she said that the doctors can't do anything until I'm actually having a seizure. But shes a nurse and agrees that it sounds like I was having a seizure and told me that I'm lucky that I didn't pass out. 

Its been about 24 hours now and I felt fine all day but now I feel really weird. Almost trippy or some thing. I haven't smoked weed today but I feel like not fully here. Also seeing some minor visual hallucinations almost like I'll go into an intense day dream for a second. I dont feel like im gunna start doing what i did yesterday but theres definitely a weirdness I can't shake. Its not anxiety or anything I just feel spaced out, like im really super stoned or like a lsd headspace. 

I don't really wanna go to the docs because I already owe the hospital a lot of money. Btw ive suffered a few big concusions in the past idk if this helps. Any advice would be appreciated.",3.4733010752688145,4.93482307741936,4.825564516129036,83.47168010752691,73.06451612903227,7.360215053763441,25.81989247311828,7.937092434478242,1.4877311827956985,1214,40,240,17,24,404,176,310,0.066,0.746,0.188,0.9891,1,0,2,1,2,0,22.0,0,1,0,2,12,18,1,2,16,1,26,5,3,0,1,49,49,26,0,4,16,1,7,9,0,2,2,3,0,0,17,13,0,2,6,2,2,7,9,6,0,2,17,11,29,12,25,29,9,41,0,1,1,0,12,15,0,15,28,156,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.09679575644142044,0.0,0.0,0.09692794564223722,0.0,0.0,0.1986501962616609,0.0,0.10945933802398168,0.07932271915436621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745303674755898,0.0,0.07588056827829738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16325089063601664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06046569362922879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017844036499934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12793951422127375,0.10226119462947826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030516466829311,0.0,0.0,0.11625069161479235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357239244998307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20061507217976315,0.14172362639733874,0.19047713957840265,0.0,0.0,0.08437150790704047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155469046730518,0.0,0.11274465338243653,0.0,0.0793318162283874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648539529639279,0.20960071469151387,0.0,0.0,0.09768280019242892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21428582529281334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085361058485406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4361358285271515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432833523164945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617087901390863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308369649646693,0.0,0.0,0.11292920133160593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468868975326103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091254079152773,0.1069442867137021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31772032026030483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847082647869299,0.09435301328562996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904209800685721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636180086434566,0.09810207948436933,0.0,0.21062293705606744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589785387917907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783885998740189,0.0,0.09402112887974767,0.18956181492020888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184266627295361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409243698000558,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,andieuwu,2020/02/22,"DPDR hey there, i’ve been dealing with DPDR for around 2 years now. it’s constant. i never don’t feel depersonalized. i’ve seen multiple therapists with no luck. i continue getting worse every day that i wake up. it never gets better only worse. i don’t know what to do. therapists only want to tell me to have a positive mindset but that’s not my issue. nothing feels real. has anyone had any luck, or anything that makes this better? grounding techniques have not worked for me. i’m not sure what else to do.",1.169828571428571,3.811574840000002,3.007714285714286,86.22100000000002,90.6,5.257142857142857,21.142857142857142,6.868970318607317,0.8762857142857148,404,14,74,6,14,134,68,100,0.13,0.775,0.095,-0.3622,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,1,0,9,1,1,1,3,19,18,2,0,1,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,3,3,7,5,10,15,0,10,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,3,7,45,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845722666690975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217998094996674,0.0,0.1433460129305842,0.15506871851629075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3081191403961635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18824077099279066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123400870184855,0.1795853544264848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455159159227848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676513190344748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.176154449257295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18201732638732848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18181225570392096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573192803578266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116275193219603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26869679076212183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167142900326023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26496328170062344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982697920196754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417485949125155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15225237700591332,0.0,0.0,0.4045030433824396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274355615057656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681459290379968,0.0,0.3550351374140165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217459348535397
mentalhealth,biancamath,2020/02/22,"Brain Worms and Trepanning I’ve been feeling really kak, quit smoking cigarettes so the withdrawals have my mood all over. But I am consistently thinking weird thoughts. 

Like how I want to drill a hole in my head. Or peel off all my skin. And that there’s worms in my brain making me feel weird. And images of me falling back onto a spear or something in my chest. Hahah. 

It may sound silly, but I think the change in chemicals and situation is triggering my old self harm behavior. When I want a smoke really bad I literally just want someone to smack me or pinch me or (ask I keep repeating) rip off all my skin. 

I’m okay. I just wanna know if anyone has gone through this complete frustration before? I feel slightly dissociated. 

Thank you 🌟",2.4386800699300717,5.107138370629372,3.5739466783216787,85.35784309440561,81.37762237762237,6.931643356643357,24.322115384615394,8.07648339933343,1.6545248251748252,589,22,113,12,16,190,99,143,0.124,0.784,0.091,-0.8692,0,0,3,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,1,7,10,1,0,5,1,6,6,6,3,3,32,22,14,0,5,9,0,5,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,3,4,0,1,7,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,3,6,20,4,13,18,3,14,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,6,5,68,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128744677716584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17213228280333626,0.0,0.0,0.1415809758405464,0.1537369188546314,0.0,0.0,0.15667705280364827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110894153332749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19478013333153255,0.0,0.19305185417141774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792978235081073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889656586201782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365900994508092,0.0,0.0,0.10119043923617717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995431185001843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290505493386833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19320850937654785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958399009478092,0.0,0.0,0.23591073982314234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19208282448679395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20696453057631065,0.0,0.0,0.1560087532219715,0.14174863698815449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951782088502704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23596009103504814,0.0,0.1461749062515125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32580558405794185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dirkingly,2020/02/22,"Anyone have experience with TMS? I'm starting TMS (transcranial magnetic stimulation) on Monday, and I'm really nervous about it. I also don't know much about it, and my therapist isn't being very helpful in providing resources despite my incessant begging for more resources and research for me to read about it so I can understand it better. 

I was wondering if anyone here has any experience with TMS, and if you could share a bit about it with me?   
What it was like? Did it help? Does it feel weird? Were there any side affects? How soon did you start feeling different? 

Feel free to PM/chat if you don't want to share publicly. And don't feel like you need to answer those questions specifically, those are just a few to put out there in case you're not sure what to say, but I'd love to hear anything & everything about your experience. Thanks in advance!!",3.4253048780487814,5.943471347560978,4.236768292682928,82.94344512195124,76.37804878048779,7.758536585365856,27.32317073170732,8.660442795831766,2.2708121951219518,687,28,128,15,16,220,102,164,0.044000000000000004,0.8059999999999999,0.15,0.9564,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,5,0,2,13,11,0,1,2,0,15,1,0,3,1,31,31,12,0,6,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,12,9,0,0,9,1,1,2,5,2,0,0,5,6,12,10,22,24,4,12,0,0,0,1,14,6,0,5,6,84,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12097277171889632,0.0,0.1639039725302091,0.0,0.2057413286684996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211546862467884,0.0,0.12448459241156948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378846339100353,0.16515067489202265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077898988340773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804783769588127,0.0,0.0,0.13237981190426104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595420278916412,0.4439213594753344,0.0,0.0,0.30595221128191163,0.10806929014860744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17049539497152852,0.0,0.2027898850058116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313555290916272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780845915215446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365295722088607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120288445091564,0.11216683495548116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15207090586838418,0.1694601118779957,0.0,0.15131369680768084,0.0,0.09690920377680684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12029817059512428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141432766037044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257278629641373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392716335022556,0.0,0.17563933399768394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15748027834108347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12481586977164105,0.08922459333775347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16404885562762636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,orangetangello,2020/02/22,"I get so frustrated that I hurt myself and don't seem to be able to stop it. How do I stop? So when I get mad or frustrated by stuff to a certain point I don't do stuff like scream into a pillow or vent to ppl, I hit stuff. Mostly myself. I thought the fear of pain or even the pain itself is supposed to stop me from doing stuff but I've literally punched my leg so much I bruised it and dug my nailed into my arm I left cuts. Like this seems crazy but it's like the pain doesn't even register at the time and I don't stop. I don't break stuff or anything, I've never even thought about hitting other ppl or smashing stuff. If I throw anything it's usually like a pillow at the bed. Should I see a therapist? Or anger management. I rarely get mad, it's more out of frustration as my life has always just been one bad or frustrating failure or event after another. I used to play softball and tennis and those helped me release some of my inner turmoil but I stopped tennis after my coach said I was too aggressive with my serves and I noticed I was actually hitting him with the ball (not purposely, my aim was just shit as it would hit him instead of the court, like a freaking homing beacon or some shit). Anyways, help or advice would be appreciated. Thanks.",2.5616596194503174,4.3068389573643415,3.847977448907685,88.36205073995774,76.09302325581395,6.8614517265680055,24.905567300916143,7.686295010490155,1.1960713178294573,993,34,209,14,22,325,136,258,0.299,0.634,0.067,-0.9963,0,0,0,0,0,2,22.0,0,0,0,0,14,28,11,2,12,0,19,8,4,2,2,47,34,27,0,4,17,0,0,5,0,3,4,2,4,0,17,11,0,5,4,3,0,1,7,20,0,1,7,3,33,8,24,18,5,22,0,1,1,0,5,8,2,16,17,146,50,1,0.08977386640848263,0.0,0.08760634357876194,0.0,0.0,0.0877259832506846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469904848635231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413572645690246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477524856500609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495742859417798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17788437625591175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102055833006836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407094197562168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12034706060343728,0.0,0.0900505077213628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610478073754918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09753956852760436,0.0,0.06340993677295588,0.21929488237018369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599412132369348,0.0,0.06923914015753439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220814192323767,0.0,0.0,0.06083309524431186,0.0,0.28657717016048806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486532123401218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539550496301786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153814846589457,0.1634535126153218,0.0,0.0,0.1843031675663641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3752748606256572,0.0,0.0,0.6166175929701208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265171468959275,0.0,0.10423437822039723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14254084418029594,0.05234786344509587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753579661412986,0.09887323069263017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754555791705344,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Phoenixflame3009,2020/02/22,"I Think I'm Depressed? For context, I suffer a long winded history of anxiety due to my autism ( Aspergers if anyone's wondering ). I'm no stranger to nervous breakdowns after having suffered the first of many during my junior year of high school. I've learned to recognize the first signs of an episode and have learned to handle them better. 

However, I'm completely lost when it comes to the other end of the spectrum: depression.

I *think* I've suffered it once about a year prior. I can't accurately remember all the signs and symptoms but I definitely remember feeling weak all the time. I felt sad, too. I barely had any appetite to speak of and if I did manage to eat something I felt sick afterwards. But more than that, it felt like there was this destructive black hole taking residence in my head that swallowed every emotion and feeling I had until I was left feeling nothing at all. 

I'm no medical expert, nor do I claim to be. But in my opinion, I think this episode might have been triggered by my then boyfriend, now husband leaving to join the military. It makes sense, doesn't it? It took a while but eventually I did break out of my funk and started living 'normally' again. As normal as I'm used to.

Recently, my husband returned from active military. I can't tell you how happy I felt running up to him and knowing that he was here with me, that he was alive. I never wanted to let him go. There, I thought, 'We can be happy now. We can start our lives and finally be happy.'

Except...those feelings I had a year ago are coming back. Every day I worry and I stress and above all, I feel sad. I feel like nothing I do matters. I feel scared that he's going to grow tired of me and find someone who does make him happy--despite his reassurance that he won't and that he only loves me. I have no idea if this even constitutes as depression, or what else it might be. I posted something similar to this on r/relationshipadvice and some people suggested these thoughts might be originating from a bad head space, and I agree. That's definitely what it is. 

I've considered speaking to my doctor about these feelings but I'm not sure if that's the right next step. Maybe the next step should be therapy? Maybe I should try speaking to someone? I don't know. I've never seen the benefit of venting my problems to a complete stranger but I guess that's kinda what I'm doing right now, isn't it?

I'm not sure what this post is for or what I'm expecting. I don't even know if this post belongs in this subreddit (if it doesn't, please tell me and I'll remove it). But if anyone out there can offer some insight, or maybe even a suggestion on what to do next, I'd be forever grateful.",3.4174807395993843,5.2337038173258,4.561035353535357,83.85698189522344,73.91525423728814,7.614466700907378,28.45236260914227,8.367750914986694,2.078958192090396,2121,87,412,37,44,695,251,531,0.156,0.7440000000000001,0.1,-0.9819,2,0,2,0,0,0,67.0,3,1,1,4,17,27,1,3,18,0,45,11,2,6,8,100,91,40,0,14,19,2,12,2,0,6,6,3,0,0,38,21,2,0,28,0,0,10,16,16,0,2,19,17,54,11,50,58,7,62,0,9,2,1,27,14,0,19,36,270,92,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06222403431452764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04773531559059863,0.0,0.05369932991326108,0.0,0.0,0.0981645866434177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053975970954520766,0.05861027173651295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062082174385496826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12093433558841687,0.14719719526736955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0452702604829826,0.0,0.18137772412593586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07184802125273636,0.061428514532982086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182747340407293,0.05863929424551974,0.0789604373129828,0.06217233682453356,0.0,0.0,0.13909030533164374,0.0,0.11828539442016076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839434440460021,0.05014764611739948,0.2695945745066429,0.07689568835323203,0.06415737294351062,0.11941643404047375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978738793488085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732820610725565,0.0,0.0,0.2241730970871836,0.0,0.0,0.14408157367938734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416535078516326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924212295738345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157327566785194,0.0,0.0,0.07432684999808488,0.07626756578612341,0.07177960725051956,0.0,0.0685879058937804,0.0,0.12396774323675165,0.06212076756325319,0.0,0.0,0.07662662974882728,0.0,0.06335413753782401,0.0,0.09371202078371904,0.07116717239484527,0.21156230432239395,0.0,0.0,0.07071453462192044,0.0,0.22339885029965292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827812254356856,0.0,0.22396098393892291,0.0,0.1375532813533035,0.13470886192913809,0.0,0.0,0.07475586721162351,0.0,0.05338680563350176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04866468913303365,0.0,0.0,0.07705352881492619,0.0,0.0,0.20168352235992384,0.0,0.0,0.06716756904548599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693095420424486,0.0,0.15903553041220475,0.11989306776117604,0.0,0.0,0.07027789480532898,0.07104154665605694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895276017935988,0.10807977932758972,0.0,0.0,0.09936940678314744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804086549970072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231676868299125,0.07295995370751708,0.052778245217146635,0.0,0.12270784097001472,0.0,0.08027461884982393,0.0,0.0,0.13493523700328675,0.0,0.11145469858884656,0.04093153352356655,0.08067934780892988,0.0,0.0,0.07798973183726261,0.04765810528167705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062633409511223,0.0,0.0,0.04140309726766718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612397515210821,0.0,0.07128689055584407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561071211790268
mentalhealth,sjizzLpizzl,2020/02/22,"Is having feeling of no guilt in certain situations, considered not having empathy? I have done stuff and still do stuff. I do not feel bad about it, yet I do know that I am the person that is executing wrong behaviour atleast in society's eyes. 

This requires empathy, I think. Right?",3.8652830188679235,6.369574773584912,5.24211320754717,76.35901886792455,74.84905660377359,9.52301886792453,31.35471698113208,9.888512548439397,3.6769426415094335,225,11,40,7,5,75,40,53,0.141,0.743,0.11699999999999999,-0.3204,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,1,0,10,1,1,0,1,9,14,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,3,5,1,4,13,0,5,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,2,32,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22886388444016614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805017128025685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27718861233842024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063939855394365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23933546497085065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23408177775242064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30810235278500936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188983678327916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.627562872188531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17563361946325848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996877220902489,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheMadBull,2020/02/22,"Overall mental state & dreams Hey,

First of all, I've been following this sub-reddit for a while now but first time poster, so if I'm posting in the wrong place or anything, let me know.

Basically, I've been feeling really s\*\*\* for a few years now, mostly related to specific bad events/interactions with people that have caused me severe issues like really low self-esteem, drifting further into introvertedness, very bad mental state and, most importantly, having an almost constant feeling of sadness, anger and every other bad emotion that makes me feel bad physically on the inside as well.

What I want to focus on this post here is that I've had loads of nightmares in the recent years, replaying the bad events/interactions or finding myself in new ones with the same people that are just as bad and they feel so realistic, but my biggest issue is that I occasionally get what I would call 'good' dreams as well, where I see my hopes&wishes as a reality. 

For example, today I had a dream about a girl I've been crushing on on&off in the past (but she friendzoned me very firmly) and we were together in that dream. But then I woke up, reality hit me instantly and I felt 1000x times worse than with any of the nightmares. I just don't know what to make of it, I'm in an emotional wreck and it's hard to stay on topic as I want to drift off to all the other bad s\*\*\* that is going on in my life.

I just wanted to know if any of you also get that sort of feeling where the nightmares that are scarring/reminding you for past and present events feel easier than 'good' dreams. And if so, how do you deal with it or cope with it?

Thanks.",8.560104493207941,6.972473307210034,8.35102194357367,73.06814211076282,62.00940438871474,11.390679205851619,34.119331243469176,10.203070172399654,3.180222403343782,1311,41,250,23,15,423,167,319,0.179,0.703,0.11800000000000001,-0.9863,0,0,0,0,1,0,52.0,1,3,1,2,16,17,1,0,16,0,17,1,0,4,2,54,42,30,0,7,13,0,8,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,20,15,0,0,11,5,0,4,1,11,2,3,8,9,25,6,46,31,6,48,0,2,1,0,10,21,0,10,19,168,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817412794490151,0.0,0.0,0.07041736398228213,0.0,0.2862219041807454,0.0,0.11976051983592804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246156907440908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5146543567201789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899137604653441,0.0,0.0,0.09045649974549506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951559192408054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907805965334283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980995181885303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418993752052505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26713881045585525,0.0,0.08454638350139085,0.0,0.08048046022068818,0.14979867673124356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200996106631587,0.0,0.05004355233232236,0.14771231877611216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887977397366303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838125952152369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14517778850292334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900419633931781,0.062195684807087474,0.04301911049853103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755447916368054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17747698540379842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504384101281771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05966818782996214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16811647413107506,0.12209217423449445,0.0,0.09199848821770104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866424910870054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282027482087716,0.0,0.08694345770941682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016824744043977,0.0,0.09186032421930687,0.0994768209756054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385466373072514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106899734036123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269088350658104,0.0,0.08346562151337726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14530880639650376,0.15581094594993744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15834361788045648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125863443851377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897353285508756,0.06255157884131883,0.09627406276665597,0.0,0.1134087637047696
mentalhealth,looktotheeeast,2020/02/22,"I want to go see a movie by myself But I’m a little anxious. Does it look lame/do people care? And by people I mean those who work at the theatre. I’m working on going places and doing things more on my own — I love shopping by myself and eating by myself — but going to the movies has always been seen as this thing you do with another person or a group of people.

The day I want to go on in particular is a day where I’m just by myself doing things so I thought I’d catch a movie on my way home. Have any of you gone and how did it make you feel?

ALSO: is it weird if you’re going to see a movie thats been out for a long time so the theatre has the potential of being empty? Lol. Convince me theres no reason to feel weird and that I should just fuck it and do it.",0.2566764705882356,1.8556398882352951,2.6443382352941183,95.0282720588235,82.47058823529412,4.9558823529411775,16.50735294117647,5.602791699666715,-0.7062647058823526,591,10,141,3,16,203,95,170,0.095,0.8240000000000001,0.081,-0.5012,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,0,2,8,6,1,0,12,1,14,3,0,3,0,24,37,15,0,4,6,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,13,8,1,0,5,1,1,7,1,3,0,0,6,6,16,3,23,29,2,22,0,0,4,2,7,10,1,2,4,99,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12132685937423865,0.12623947968049865,0.0,0.0,0.10317176706852677,0.15908696788067234,0.0,0.17139537163788676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546841003240772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956879392917088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276728799946666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15524286921495306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342386714794745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402585683763196,0.0,0.0,0.4311171771453076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15218305279733935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205882423400655,0.0,0.13426347520401252,0.1274028397566366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692919466457049,0.0,0.10127129841080362,0.0,0.0,0.16526269570330065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3155413498104821,0.13247215414697036,0.15851044417737695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598883925700482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417952791270365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3023791822531036,0.0,0.0,0.1204451888421791,0.08846654914087779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789715079649166,0.1204247307478706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220901434350661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,doineedonereally,2020/02/23,"Advice Trigger warning- CSA

 Hey! Just want to start off saying that I'm a 20 year old college student in Canada. I have had a fair share of hookups but slowly I'm realizing that it is only making me feel more worthless and disgusted. Also, I want to add that I was sexually abused as a child by someone very close to me. I think one of the reasons I only prefer hookups is because they are usually one off and I don't have to see the person again, I feel like I'm scared to open up intimately. I'm so confused as I just want to be with a person I actually care about, almost all of the hookups I feel like I just want to run away as soon as things steam up. 
 I'm not even sure if I'm ready to date someone, but I'm trying to make efforts.",2.9522612197928666,3.6119424999999983,4.799159953970083,86.23818757192177,73.36708860759494,7.264441887226697,27.02186421173763,7.348242739294969,1.2540683544303797,577,20,128,6,11,198,94,158,0.156,0.7070000000000001,0.13699999999999998,-0.8484,0,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,9,9,1,2,7,0,9,0,0,4,2,31,29,11,0,6,7,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,5,6,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,4,0,2,2,5,14,5,25,26,2,16,0,1,1,0,7,8,0,3,9,78,19,2,0.0,0.18771626487579368,0.15460698535304646,0.0,0.0,0.1548181245040368,0.0,0.0,0.15864697540947129,0.0,0.0,0.12669818315728376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488522789849525,0.0,0.0,0.09657880627187942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615321996749953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464298219686148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24032426110178534,0.2263680086415205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480395268921768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21150946428194325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662479559320605,0.0,0.21471553499917728,0.2409896737863955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766737940126145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289470137617754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599165444405905,0.158618283511824,0.0,0.12624996113559894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684781991678697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213913550762676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14932048538494136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525532217583572,0.10151696460653213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756507257573963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17449069901839506,0.13072316773901668,0.3737896952583434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020251504950068
mentalhealth,powerlifter_12,2020/02/23,"Can’t move on So I’m bipolar and live by myself. I had to put my dog down this past December 4. She was my world, she was the reason I got up in the morning and has saved my life twice from my 2 suicide attempts. I also have a cat who I absolutely love, but I can’t move past my dogs death. I’ve been getting angry a little bit more, snap at people and my cat (I immediately apologize and regret it), hate being alone now and cry at random times. I’m for sure going to be talking to my therapist about it, but I don’t really know where to turn",1.8899623352165733,2.8708222711864413,4.4233333333333364,86.70179849340867,76.28813559322035,7.278342749529191,22.433145009416194,7.793537801064563,0.8498048964218459,420,11,96,6,9,149,82,118,0.21600000000000005,0.7120000000000001,0.071,-0.9711,0,1,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,1,0,4,0,11,3,0,1,1,13,20,9,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,4,3,2,0,1,5,0,17,3,14,13,2,17,0,1,0,1,6,9,0,1,4,63,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20139995649135176,0.0,0.1555080803335182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122978919415117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136031028162368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159633652705796,0.0,0.11051502521775024,0.0,0.15552591467571888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19198712486566785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686909175240546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137351513922224,0.0,0.1948981122264429,0.17171007379234934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755060364516718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4133563930517971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37126453883080696,0.13481276893387306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954841102684072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457484466834745,0.19993532406115486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21270561054209824,0.0,0.1832744673840768,0.0,0.0,0.15629806289812165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257808535998936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339008774795535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115145836583573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_this_place_sucks_,2020/02/23,"My friends At first it wasn't an issue. I mean, everyone puts faces on things that aren't alive and sometimes even gives them names but I go a bit further. It all started when I moved into my own house, I was living alone and didn't really talk to anyone. 

With nobody to talk to I made Timothy. I sometimes call him Tomorrow  but usually everyone refers to him as Tim. He's is probably my best friend and I talk to him a lot. He's a lamp and I know he is subconsciously but to me he's a person. Not like human but just a person. 

Tim was probably my only friend until I got into a pottery class and made George. George is a bit of a grump but I like his humor, it's very sarcastic and sometimes I need that. 

After George came Mr. Mannequin, he's a small little wooden model figure that I got in my art set. At first he was very blank so I drew him a little face. Mr. Mannequin is the most naive, always getting himself into trouble but never anything too bad, he's like a child almost. These are (currently) the only three friends I have that are not human. 

When I went back to school, I was a bit distanced and lost a lot of connections with my friends in school, now my circle is very tight knit. One day in school I asked someone ""is it okay to have imaginary friends?"" And they said ""it is okay, but only as a child."" So then I asked ""what about at my age(18)?"" and they said ""no, that's schizophrenic."" I stopped talking to that friend. 

I didn't see a problem with it because I wasn't hurting anyone. But an issue arose when I got a roommate. My roommate is nice to them but he had a friend come over ( we'll call him james) who wasnt as supportive of my friends. 

James kept saying, ""it's just a lamp"" (I rarely show mr. Mannequin or George)  and I kept telling him, ""no that's Tim"" at one point James got up and walked over to Tim and slapped him on the head. Tim immediately told me he didn't like that and then his light went out. At this point I'm not going to lie, I almost blacked out on James. Not only did he do that even tho it wasn't necessary, but he was being rude about it. My initial thought was anger but anger immediately turned into worry ""what if Tim never wakes up, what if I lose my best friend"". I dropped what I had in my hand and ran over to try and fix Tim, he wouldn't turn on and at this point I started to panic. ""No no NO"" I ran around the house frantically looking for a light bulb, when I found one, I replaced it and Tim woke back up although I could tell he didn't feel the same. James apologized for hurting Tim and I forgave him because Tim wanted me to. Tim said it would do no good to hurt anyone or get mad about it so I didn't. That's just the type of person that Tim is.",1.5948904881101384,3.3646863634751805,2.9289695452649163,93.76029411764708,78.98226950354609,5.841969128076763,21.519816437213183,6.7065604860727355,0.2630069253233209,2095,59,475,20,51,679,222,564,0.141,0.726,0.134,-0.0993,1,1,0,0,0,0,78.0,1,0,4,6,21,36,4,2,27,2,39,6,5,2,3,81,81,48,0,8,22,0,3,4,10,3,1,4,0,10,32,30,0,4,7,2,0,11,23,14,0,6,39,12,67,22,60,37,11,69,0,5,3,0,68,34,0,9,26,303,99,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128900216107752,0.06272438763242412,0.0,0.0,0.0503927730900557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270399266206376,0.0,0.04983769963425685,0.053913381042739315,0.11323534799896864,0.0,0.0,0.09313750336800343,0.05056707906059322,0.07383656078151077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271130167433847,0.0,0.19835538447483744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368197499164856,0.06926725810425424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216914994296205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04835415293835825,0.0,0.0,0.039057741469410684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000179556564688,0.0,0.0,0.11573994796979906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030622172015256313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030287026889328,0.0,0.06640355189645751,0.4679036440715949,0.0,0.06328271470734936,0.05809697804728785,0.06883802163346503,0.05079687253172768,0.19374915325616784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215450049586939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976176981183774,0.19449992362868035,0.0,0.0,0.12642283387381814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033283514325341094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835092918604065,0.12139888163922267,0.053477713781958834,0.0,0.05085716775080069,0.0677538407074645,0.06611101996037744,0.10297598317677177,0.0,0.11461122520956225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597021427769605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06436825280355743,0.0,0.04490625643818223,0.09341892164922744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311596039563093,0.1842417543053297,0.0,0.07105693418191142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15864226995171313,0.0,0.0,0.17175314663914115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13059303304435266,0.0579500431170159,0.0,0.06088194517053747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03879782787620405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17282614939727015,0.04816165580434666,0.0,0.18387716350267425,0.048260396296522914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05131432981156272,0.0,0.1796933034223581,0.0,0.08573276492552599,0.0,0.0,0.05063288296467693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872550028386565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19471107053272407,0.1058684239441918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040234971281046236,0.0,0.0,0.0480797852341787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05786997398489953,0.0,0.04111789804508453,0.131749012923618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667009336790248,0.14991098191576924,0.03572127599577854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228391365307692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06150406275075378,0.0,0.043021795384267376,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SuicideSkwad,2020/02/23,Feel like my friends are replacing me and I don’t know what to do. It’s completely eating me up inside. The worst thing is I know that it is most likely not even the case but that’s what my brain is telling me is happening. I really feel like I’m gonna lose myself.,1.3422413793103445,2.8363073620689683,3.1753793103448267,92.95755172413791,78.82758620689657,7.398620689655173,20.220689655172414,8.238735603445708,0.6981406896551721,209,5,50,4,5,70,40,58,0.105,0.774,0.121,-0.0129,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,2,0,7,2,1,0,0,8,14,2,0,0,2,0,2,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,7,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,9,4,2,13,2,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,33,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2932097103654129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27538864361767745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268761513278879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734810705510824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26561239763409583,0.3752813963555549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029265081223969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23226484224100866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886965051740347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849597202926914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29384362530297176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682634412748279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295719413987847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17449623079272986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,let_it_reindeer,2020/02/23,"I’m always questioning if my thoughts are real. Can anyone relate to this? I kinda feel like I’m going crazy here. I think something but then I think “did that really happen/is that true, or did my mind just make it up?” 

For example, my sister told my 2 days ago that she’s pregnant. I want to tell my boyfriend because I’m excited, but I haven’t told him yet because every time I’m about to tell him I think to myself, “did she really tell me she was pregnant?” And “what if I just made that up in my mind and it isn’t true”. So then I go look at my text messages for “proof” that she’s pregnant and it’s there. She sent me a text that said “I told them, they’re excited” (talking about how she told our parents) but because it doesn’t explicitly say “I’m pregnant” I don’t even trust that. I think to myself “what if that text was about something else and I’m making up the pregnancy in my mind”. 

Another example: (I know this is TMI) I know I have a UTI, I’ve had one before so I know the symptoms. I was going to go to the walk in clinic today, but then I was like, “did I actually even have UTI symptoms or did I make that up?” So I didn’t go because I was waiting to make sure that I really had symptoms before going. 


It happens all the time with everything. I’m constantly looking for proof that my thoughts are correct and real. Checking my work schedule every 5 minutes, reading old text messages, googling things I already know, etc. It’s like I’m constantly suspicious of myself and I feel like I’m crazy. Has anybody ever experienced this and what can I do to stop this?",1.555579853552345,3.516286481595092,3.424173758163469,89.24333762121513,79.88957055214723,6.292341183455374,24.319810013853157,7.359569317364363,1.074707817138333,1227,45,260,17,31,412,133,326,0.039,0.8490000000000001,0.11199999999999999,0.9728,1,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,1,0,1,1,15,10,0,0,6,0,26,4,0,6,9,56,69,23,0,4,11,2,2,4,0,0,4,2,0,0,25,8,0,2,13,1,1,8,5,0,0,1,22,7,50,10,25,47,2,31,0,0,2,0,26,8,0,7,19,166,75,2,0.0,0.0,0.08314546505931908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552698049458076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940232082446404,0.0,0.07089540405601483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934237448135503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059575651935388926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077549017339033,0.0,0.14500230579846865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841475236912645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0549486403147689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117585482019018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502344195546218,0.11255105194741648,0.07707064640191014,0.1435737617398344,0.0,0.07657461963776617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616200796152639,0.12173753540354068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29053566963261146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506887883593543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18730052361137933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16650278265208038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309748147394746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806207777657533,0.2274936379104954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25809106853555513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940581552358677,0.0,0.057735499376695275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460742482692408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544643228833724,0.0,0.08522567556812545,0.19395846622729554,0.16374893750322253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104720142488399,0.06775654203736725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311862767346738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123320421138017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030245963249143,0.26567443245639644,0.0,0.06848263735619227,0.22341253215666174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05660483381326002,0.21837759049104255,0.0,0.135282723775174,0.09936466409173096,0.0,0.0807621198852845,0.3256590131317961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05025471193243165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620285210477726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,farmv8,2020/02/23,"I need your help! (Money prizes involved) Hello everyone, 

I am doing a college senior project focusing on the lived experience of Depersonalization/Derealization Disorder (DDD) out of St. Mary’s College of Maryland. For my project, I have developed a short novel surrounding the life of a teenager, Celia, who is discovering that she has the disorder. She goes on a journey of self discovery and acceptance as she comes to terms with her new symptoms. The DDD symptoms in the novel are based on current scientific knowledge on the disorder. It is my goal that this novel will personalize and normalize these experiences. Ultimately, I hope to have this story published so mainstream society can have an accurate, positive awareness of DDD. 

**I want this story to be as realistic and appropriate as possible, so I am reaching out to individuals with the disorder to review my novel**. It is preferred if the people reviewing it have been diagnosed with DDD or at least frequently experience symptoms of depersonalization and derealization. The book is 96 pages double spaced and around 27,000 words in length. **To thank you for your time, each reviewer will be entered in a raffle to win one of two $25 Amazon gift cards.** If you are interested in reviewing it, please email me at [fvarmstead@smcm.edu](mailto:fvarmstead@smcm.edu). Your feedback is highly appreciated. 

Please feel free to share this with other people that you know with DDD.

Sincerely,

Vera Armstead, St. Mary’s College of Maryland, [fvarmstead@smcm.edu](mailto:fvarmstead@smcm.edu)

Trevor Dunn, Ph.D, St. Mary’s College of Maryland, Project Advisor, [tldunn@smcm.edu](mailto:tldunn@smcm.edu)",8.208750000000002,11.643679647727275,8.277272727272727,55.31090909090912,65.02272727272728,10.612121212121213,36.37878787878788,10.595843684498618,5.019010606060609,1353,67,181,41,24,438,150,264,0.037000000000000005,0.768,0.19399999999999998,0.991,1,0,0,0,0,0,76.0,0,6,0,3,3,9,0,0,15,0,21,5,0,0,0,28,28,13,0,7,3,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,14,15,0,0,5,5,2,3,0,0,0,2,1,1,20,10,41,23,5,26,0,0,0,0,18,17,0,4,6,126,34,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262875733238376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898493872058726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841414887089062,0.0,0.0,0.5800070626575163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12089435184207177,0.0,0.3712796555589488,0.0,0.0,0.06397182135846209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480303667386388,0.1336742980590875,0.0,0.12566194078519485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953154830237841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936413015293504,0.0,0.0,0.11171861849035472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381225516300584,0.0,0.12219286435300923,0.0,0.0,0.12396178360896658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573256681336328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542472573117912,0.11047153402656253,0.0,0.27775979667776224,0.0,0.14263119274338154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198693759682656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3945051359573797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648172139534707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377426189345736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359070512822234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462419992807091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mystickitty29,2020/02/23,"Mental Health + Remote Work I suffer from depression and Sometimes wish I worked remotely because it’s a struggle for me to get up, get dressed and do the whole thing every day before 8am. I do it because I have to, but sometimes I call out of work, and I’m quite frequently late which I feel could endanger my job security at some point. Boss is frequently late as well and says it’s nbd, but I worry. My job doesn’t really require me to be in at a certain time, as I’m not customer facing and am on the computer 100% of the time, but everyone else seems to be there at 8ish and chipper af. 

I want to work from home on a regular basis, but then I wonder if that would enable my mental state. 

Does anyone here work remotely? Do you feel remote work has helped your depression/mental health or made it worse?",3.640223577235768,4.800769323170734,4.993658536585368,83.60235772357726,72.23170731707317,8.393495934959349,26.47154471544715,8.841846274778883,1.9145788617886184,635,21,129,12,12,212,101,164,0.08800000000000001,0.82,0.09300000000000001,-0.2406,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,0,9,3,6,0,1,6,0,12,3,1,2,1,27,23,15,0,5,7,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,7,7,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,3,16,3,20,18,2,18,0,2,0,0,5,9,0,5,8,80,23,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481870091727264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789180060820992,0.0,0.10322092002596674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386512718557467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685151460534,0.0,0.0,0.07823115882514843,0.0,0.10447910977357812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615410261730496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133407434755784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220400080376624,0.115911339358051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267007319779255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675285151944815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25788133510853833,0.0,0.0,0.08130763276135719,0.0,0.12167797992023754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407513559674405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736727902534084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114780945149328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444921584391631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146716560998016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12902192370800294,0.0,0.0,0.07771056186213952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096465950225586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043076673948173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23994586529211304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681346360584714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058910500695439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14146688204909807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154834638995522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090670230356254,0.0,0.0,0.13543178143297369,0.13949381683572676,0.0,0.13154920530587308,0.5298653128426662,0.12319027983772238,0.12361931951759125,0.08617100684855451,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Watcher_209,2020/02/23,"Do I need help?, is it normal? 15 year old girl here. Most of my life I have felt a loneliness within me, I had friends, really good ones, but it doesn't matter what I do, I always feel it inside me and it makes me angry.

It's not fair, every day I feel it and it hurts. I used to self-harm myself because I felt that was what I deserved, It's been a year since I stopped and I think about it every single day. 

Every time I open myself to others they all say the same, ""it's not that hard"", ""just stop thinking about it"", ""I don't understand"", so I stopped talking about it, I have been pretending I'm fine but I'm actually falling apart. It has come to the point when even a small mistake or stressful situation makes me want to scream and slap myself to stop being like this.

I don't know what to do, if it's so easy to stop, why I can't?, I tried to make new friends here at my new home, far away from my hometown, but I realized I don't know how to socialize. I'm alone, I'm angry, anxious and slow.

How long can I keep living this life before I fall apart in front of someone?, I don't want to talk to anyone, they all say the same, I think I want to kill myself but I'm not brave enough to do it.",1.090898601398603,2.4334391038461547,2.9975524475524487,94.62108391608393,79.11538461538461,5.9580419580419575,19.89510489510489,6.574015621080383,-0.04811538461538456,917,21,222,8,22,308,130,260,0.221,0.6809999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.9891,0,1,0,0,0,1,42.0,0,0,2,0,12,11,1,1,6,0,20,2,0,6,2,52,45,16,1,7,10,0,5,1,2,0,2,3,1,1,23,7,0,6,11,1,0,4,9,5,0,1,6,8,38,6,23,38,7,30,0,1,0,0,11,10,0,3,17,141,61,0,0.0,0.0,0.10419095315657592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058028332014327,0.0,0.0,0.08884019973605108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061836034719325,0.0,0.07465523171521261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003128079339732,0.0,0.0,0.06508527319909438,0.0,0.09085239008685073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197187248874268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377140943277926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032071778993872,0.0,0.07051978946061746,0.0,0.2698719720902897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797103280366734,0.0,0.2050295948585563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649786294644286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955260893502906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564387872420688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156488013103274,0.0,0.10709781790273164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429821516231455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490102058143927,0.11812386482183355,0.0,0.11735468716106537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15082793053753546,0.052161845553950766,0.0,0.09427881187102463,0.09448703356960554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21380702141157987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791677168517187,0.0,0.20623595647691595,0.0,0.0,0.10461076080237623,0.0,0.0,0.11203590154312844,0.0,0.07234930620373681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093103248124044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839883115158582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16981367997473593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138315016129742,0.0,0.0,0.08832025971449979,0.12001261148067162,0.0,0.10883735209404788,0.09046486292060084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4463175134017044,0.12230330663981212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716334440062903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20523941941751106,0.0,0.0,0.06225774944198278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248901084534176,0.0,0.0,0.11115009254192663,0.0,0.09221396788142004,0.0,0.0,0.18892502434547395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634224066909057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375112211358877
mentalhealth,dmak2019,2020/02/23,"Break down the stigma attached to anxiety Type 'yes' if you can relate. Are there any #anxietysymptoms or  #anxiousfeelings you would like to add👇👇👇
@dlcanxietysupport
https://www.instagram.com/p/B87RrxWgfKk/?igshid=rzna2l511wdi",15.398850574712649,21.080879,9.338620689655171,45.32678160919542,52.10344827586207,10.763218390804601,30.356321839080447,10.504223727775694,4.3929908045977015,197,6,21,5,3,52,25,29,0.06,0.851,0.08900000000000001,0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,1,12,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5081430580462802,0.0,0.5716300684211814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.365059577114435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5308118335090131,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,munkustrapp,2020/02/23,"how to help i have a best friend who often goes through mental break downs. i want to help her so bad but my anxiety of saying something wrong makes it literally, literally impossible for me to be able to say anything helpful..
i was wondering if anyone had any tips on how to articulate what i want to tell her? if we were irl id be so much more affectionate (hugs, gifts etc) but we're only online and messages are all ive got :/",2.251982758620688,4.254501137931037,4.384583333333335,82.99687500000002,77.85057471264369,7.5683908045976995,24.66810344827586,8.472884824447931,1.6581275862068965,337,12,70,7,8,116,67,87,0.121,0.716,0.163,0.2473,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,3,1,14,13,9,0,4,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,2,10,4,11,7,5,3,0,0,0,1,12,2,0,4,0,47,13,0,0.21434688354072975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457632310755278,0.0,0.16397477921543824,0.0,0.0,0.1498763247849591,0.0,0.176389221615916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17897069448120256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22494383012418165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390534351877015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16560387051313372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143278372797965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4310165933968845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307820919426548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21601124368400648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575696224709546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16302046377322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409144900910733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501470299090515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18734862393592347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528546908971569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324500517740336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343546684142897,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ancientrobots,2020/02/23,"Forgetfulness vs Memory Loss How can I differentiate the two? I dont remember conversations, I dont remember who I worked with two days ago, I cant remember if I showered yesterday.",4.6004901960784315,7.010262382352941,7.918235294117648,58.478725490196105,72.23529411764707,13.945098039215686,34.86274509803922,12.45797560212912,6.220227450980394,147,8,25,8,3,55,23,34,0.087,0.9129999999999999,0.0,-0.3182,2,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,8,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,6,0,1,4,0,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,17,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18649630566470146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568288249969396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4931464380456514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7149859186575859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110370940572519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15316500071235875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vskskfba,2020/02/23,"Weird mood swings I haven't been diagnosed yet since I'm just starting therapy, but I'm pretty sure I have depression. I have contemplated suicide several times and I feel miserable most of the time, but occasionally I get random moments where I feel happy (around once every 3 months) and like I can do anything. 

This lasts about 1-2 weeks most times and I feel energetic, happy and almost reborn, for no reason. These moments often end abruptly, I can feel amazing one day and in just a day I feel miserable again, and it barely takes anything to bring me down again.

Could this be some sort of mood disorder other than depression or do other depressed people also have this?",7.830476190476189,7.848150619047626,7.818888888888887,71.06500000000003,62.650793650793645,10.692063492063493,33.87301587301587,10.290406445055957,3.494996825396825,542,20,92,11,7,175,84,126,0.231,0.585,0.184,-0.8173,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,0,10,13,0,2,2,0,11,1,0,1,1,27,22,10,1,1,5,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,1,5,11,5,9,19,3,21,0,5,0,0,0,4,0,8,17,62,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14929686907398046,0.0,0.0,0.1192310286024836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24538457352835735,0.13272594954955413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904003680125852,0.0,0.0,0.1923075764689654,0.0,0.3852453043121661,0.15132804665675018,0.0,0.0,0.1708755160759734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13205370689917592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561876875640915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3769339614197724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789586033333773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.317428296564097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12153213176538173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284017043856296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900601787648782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878105733130465,0.10103047043343777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336353631438963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168297513918058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532942487017778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684346447562401,0.0,0.12333272917133302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553004107856437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16308547234369866,0.0,0.14052005025018516,0.0,0.11210070717187012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17050285593985698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26081506696987833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959482612048895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zalvion,2020/02/23,"Need help surviving work. 24 year old accountant from the U.S. here. Work has been really taking a toll on me and I'm not sure what to do.

My coworkers are nice and I'm treated fairly well but I've been here a year and a half now and I'm not sure if the job is the right fit. I believe I have some sort of social anxiety disorder because I score fairly high on internet tests and feel like most symptoms apply to me. The only reason I haven't gotten help for this so far is the only true panic attack I can remember was caused by something not social anxiety related (Thought I was about to get hit by a semi truck while driving) and that's seems to be what causes people to seek help.

Most of my job is taking care of work for clients. A good day for me is doing routine technical work and maybe sending a few emails. When I have to meet clients in person or get phone calls or emails with tasks that require immediate attention I freak out. Sometimes I dont even take phone calls Because I'm scared to pick them up telling myself I will look up their file and call them back when I'm more prepared. A string of email requests or phone calls can send me into a panic I lose my train of thought and can waste half the day just worrying about work and not accomplishing anything. 

I originally wanted to be a computer scientist but procrastination and insufficient math/logic skills (in my opinion)was a big barrier to achieving that. I switched to accounting because I didn't want to drop out of school since I was already 3 semesters deep so I picked this because I thought customer service would be at a minimum and that it would pay the bills alright. Accounting itself is ok and I've learned some useful information about how businesses and taxes work at my job which I'm thankful for but I'm not passionate about it.

Right now I work 45-55 hours a week depending on the time of year. I also have a a 1 hour commute each way. By the time I get home I'm exhausted and just waste my 3-4 hours of evening time on YouTube not being productive. Every weekend I catch up on chores and try to do something to forget about work like see my friends. 

I cant bring myself to workout or try a new hobby. No motivation. They expect me earn my accounting certification this year but idk how I will have time or energy to study 2 hours m-f + 8 hours on the weekend while working.

Right now I'm trying to figure out what to do with my life because I'm miserable. I cry after work most days now. I have to fight my self loathing and usually turn to food as a solution. I'm gaining weight, dealing with other health problems etc. I just feel shackled by everything. 

I'm thinking I either quit and finish my certification and try to find a new job that's more bookkeeping based or internal after If my parents will put up with it. I live with them but I know my dad might be pissed off if I quit. Dont want to get thrown out. Other options is I try to stand my ground at this job and fight my social anxiety, health and self esteem issues probably with the help of a therapist. But I feel like I could get better on my own if. I had a less stressful job and more personal time to work on myself. 

I could try and ask for a position change or accommodation from my boss but we are a small company and I don't think its reasonable considering most other people work more hours than me and we are a small company.

Sorry for the rambly mess just wanted to get this out.

TL;DR: I have a stressful, time consuming job that puts me in situations that cause me to have constant social anxiety and self esteem issues. Need help.",4.215326923076924,5.434744613888892,5.199166666666667,82.44865384615385,70.91666666666667,8.538461538461537,28.429487179487186,8.950670267944501,2.1894935897435897,2862,105,571,54,52,939,319,720,0.149,0.7390000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.9813,10,0,2,0,2,0,52.0,2,0,5,24,26,32,4,6,35,2,49,9,1,14,3,127,96,54,0,16,29,2,4,3,1,6,5,0,2,5,24,41,2,2,19,3,7,7,13,15,1,2,11,6,72,17,86,71,16,86,0,2,2,1,44,36,1,22,43,358,96,35,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052645946291278035,0.0381513326105075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14598313471457935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03925885984503237,0.0,0.04459967744517733,0.05427368783068354,0.0,0.03668379778635823,0.0,0.14540895809966534,0.0,0.0,0.05374953943950046,0.0,0.04219303314087487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19485704024012915,0.0,0.048640544982853376,0.14702493021924218,0.05046776222238431,0.0,0.0,0.05155440248697738,0.0,0.07618043878684222,0.0,0.05240398444055767,0.0923013547654064,0.04918390205288771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05467644391915268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182467896408096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05320600216686184,0.06302014945536913,0.0,0.04019527035136527,0.0,0.04287604505300086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236639540668555,0.06816389134278124,0.0,0.0,0.043603404513959824,0.0,0.05768758743535336,0.0,0.03685836970484917,0.0,0.14954987362225447,0.0,0.0,0.04001443312841636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014207849178126,0.0,0.0,0.15988524200472606,0.050405146639226565,0.047854088492020296,0.0,0.2818911686485197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958758836558496,0.3313933914096205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02621856212541816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03369691967751761,0.0699218048115485,0.0,0.042126223433385866,0.0,0.04006192973384326,0.05337201668250032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047928171577916234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050609670100561666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074838688822105,0.0,0.09215158538940743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05006055260245778,0.0,0.0,0.07256676434664341,0.0,0.11194795267588384,0.05297306376990475,0.0,0.0,0.06614816126221704,0.08331195978463778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05143629841115128,0.045649230149874535,0.0,0.09591757926564326,0.0,0.10148469852278608,0.0,0.0,0.030562375431883167,0.0981016424675474,0.0,0.0,0.05404281882583637,0.12222475045727993,0.0,0.0,0.04776310710671371,0.04828210935115479,0.03801636408131066,0.0434307315691545,0.14930665896049303,0.0,0.0,0.039463787468148666,0.05362475391581276,0.0,0.19452543031552816,0.0,0.0734544779748043,0.04718351947702494,0.053404167383083255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092965920953462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992671183629075,0.04958592019703995,0.10760935509780636,0.0,0.041698088476605805,0.043922267279284666,0.0,0.05539159395640235,0.0,0.06113753782096393,0.0,0.11362227171840195,0.16691028311052158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19433984413254,0.051891600846825515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04120359747390557,0.052542605819584996,0.0,0.1125554813400769,0.03786765750790005,0.03826773989370367,0.05809436798758154,0.042894392028281485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4167758469732403,0.04844885291961215,0.0,0.06777947809259066,0.0,0.0,0.12288717499097992
mentalhealth,monster_cat12,2020/02/23,Bed What helps people get out of bed when your body doesn’t want to?,-0.7240000000000002,1.4216889333333356,-0.07833333333333138,108.9825,93.0,3.0,7.5,3.1291,-2.673,54,0,14,0,2,16,14,15,0.0,0.755,0.245,0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6656501377346267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130920835534466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4016757941914367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41545603077798254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35346298844563184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NothingPeach,2020/02/23,"I'm not sure how to go back to the old me I mean I guess a lot has happened the last year or so. It's been a lot in some ways. I've changed a lot, I don't really wanna go out as much, I can be dismissive of my friends, and I tend think about myself in certain ways. 

I'm kinda scared I'm just gonna fuck shit up more. Everyone is saying they miss how I used to be. I don't remember how I used to be. I guess like as you change you don't even realize it. It's like when you have a friend growing up and they look the same throughout the years and you go back and look at their old pictures and see how different they looked. 

Like you grew used to the way they looked. Ive grown used to the way I act and now I don't know how to reverse it. I'll explain how I think I used to be, but I'm not sure how spot on it is. I used to be happier I guess, I used to always put other people before myself, I used to not say I'm sorry every goddamn minute. That's one thing is I say I'm sorry too much. Like to the point where people don't think I'm sorry anymore because I just say it all the time. 

I need help and I'm not sure where to get it.",-0.5280459770114945,0.9421405172413806,1.999607662835249,99.32115862068967,84.44061302681993,5.248796934865903,17.33655172413793,6.152001189255117,-0.5975929195402299,869,18,230,7,25,299,120,261,0.075,0.81,0.115,0.76,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,5,5,0,19,14,2,1,12,0,18,2,1,15,5,55,58,20,0,2,8,0,0,4,2,1,0,4,0,0,10,8,0,0,8,0,0,8,9,4,0,1,1,9,35,10,25,51,9,32,0,1,5,1,18,10,2,9,14,140,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06492854248659392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738637984765301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000296815810756,0.0,0.04756733932064899,0.0,0.0663991446134596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650941731348194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152641420407858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051539136108913065,0.0,0.06574498878460136,0.07456253812152493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205740417557207,0.07213895715491858,0.040768290556269855,0.0,0.1330414701826612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578818154942898,0.0,0.06900308650130059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052302936890518764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04288412685910551,0.06360616903814427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15248919364392166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621075661904636,0.0,0.0,0.1990190285869943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499928854727687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147244094016466,0.057859442937379615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637620765144446,0.0,0.052876231882430964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819457319954924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376508438909668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844331084156568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04998904130848038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839459186451702,0.0,0.0,0.2482154422840697,0.07812324469020389,0.0,0.06218108270721452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009831643259037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620499642092239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22063157963977476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05184072798692272,0.14999849621191394,0.0,0.0,0.0455008536875581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5391539910297211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24775140919747066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004995845397878
mentalhealth,frogsaregreat284,2020/02/23,"I think my dad had a mental/nervous breakdown and I don't know what to do. I think my dad had a nervous/mental breakdown. I don't really know. We were driving and we had just had a fight. I made a snarky comment because I was still upset, and then suddenly he started screaming. He was driving, and the car started swerving which was pretty terrifying. He was sobbing/screaming about money, and how my mom was killing him. My mom and himself are currently going through a divorce. He said that he needed more jobs and he was breathing really heavily. I was crying and didn't know what to do. I told him to breathe, and tried to get him to have some water and calm down, but he had already gone far done the rabbit hole. Finally he pulled the car over and got out. I stayed inside, and I saw him crying and breathing in short puffs on a rock. then he got back in the car and drove us home. he hasn't spoken, and I am giving him space, but otherwise I don't know what to do. how can I help him? I know that I wasn't the only cause to lead to this ""breakdown"", but I can't help but feel I was the one who made him so upset.",2.6363409961685846,3.902384051724141,3.9323563218390842,89.82605363984676,74.86206896551724,6.534865900383142,25.38888888888889,6.937597516519254,0.9186860153256706,868,29,188,8,18,285,111,232,0.09300000000000001,0.843,0.063,-0.6836,2,0,0,0,2,0,31.0,3,0,0,1,7,6,2,2,12,0,29,4,3,6,0,39,52,24,1,1,5,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,8,18,1,0,8,1,1,10,7,5,0,1,26,4,32,1,16,26,2,29,0,0,1,0,34,9,0,1,9,127,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15498628499231393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10799474487286133,0.0,0.08561492691490975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14427731757262685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30854792968485883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14372560550282154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07101400691778864,0.0,0.0,0.15385235501418648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337753732434804,0.13472914981005413,0.07981902364813119,0.0,0.22465590786300774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18827675389331847,0.0,0.14087936336136125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937155177670896,0.0,0.15538332339317398,0.0,0.3859288157891805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26578788519093755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415371115231082,0.0,0.0,0.3289786561419279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413935379124252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517023219722064,0.10681594702251797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288465551461316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17994734115027902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13359685222805154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988176135405819,0.14969735909358256,0.11216081408562167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17998498513109845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342027185677249,0.0,0.0953540034574886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689399337836238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leftbadwork,2020/02/23,"Help with oral hygiene? I have always had problems with not brushing my teeth (and hygiene in general but this is the worst ongoing one). Even though i know its just me not doing it and no force is preventing me physically, it just feels like something i cant do (consistently). I have at least a cavity every time i go to the dentist (which i hate and loathe doing), at my worst i had 8 at once.

I go, feel like shit as they tell me to do better, beat myself up for it, tell myself i need to do it from now on, and do so for maybe a couple weeks and then fall back into never brushing, and repeat.

Im so sick of the anxiety of it and having holes in my teeth. If anyone has anything that can help me get it done please let me know.

I was thinking maybe fluoride toothpaste, a dentist gave me that once. It doesnt help that im afraid to ask my dentist for it/tips. I also actually find toothpaste foam disgusting, so i recently bought toothpaste gel to try to curb that. It helped but not enough. Basically it makes the act more enjoyable but does not motivate me to brush.",5.018181495923431,5.024823161290325,5.98267281105991,81.9006026231833,68.53917050691244,9.2575682382134,29.13470400567175,9.057496981413335,2.1410229705778097,834,27,175,14,13,277,124,217,0.187,0.706,0.107,-0.9723,0,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,1,3,10,11,3,1,7,0,20,7,3,2,1,34,34,18,0,3,10,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,16,10,0,2,7,0,1,4,8,7,0,1,6,5,26,4,24,27,5,20,0,0,0,0,9,8,1,1,10,127,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.1324563814883319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854608440775113,0.1129412010470248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383580715652783,0.0,0.0,0.09490806593648968,0.0,0.11169716030619847,0.0,0.12689256236332278,0.0,0.0,0.10437073461015196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004530964842546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15018661007700715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878135908328208,0.1389025646227349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14024905847335034,0.0,0.08965074080122144,0.0,0.11436138425083528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726193952021767,0.19393617462307267,0.0,0.0,0.1240580211222834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091518650691858,0.0,0.15428102809684094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400879630290505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639173949990702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2932310884899616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14919123725348946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879676838193958,0.0,0.1326251292364434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060320989167306,0.0,0.27272522355734663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064471997979473,0.10468609449936894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891036377602257,0.09197657774122654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899469642694382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129878692301103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402052229053413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932855587524154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449433113883493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372742403329287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697258898590475,0.13335754031861335,0.0,0.07914733439763896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921541821372273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887728004163597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gstewa372,2020/02/23,"Confused, scared, and Alone. Normally, id use a throwaway for this, but I'm too lazy. Anywho,
Im a freshman in high school taking college level courses. Up until now, my classes have been manageable, and I've been making A's and B's. However, with these new classes, I can barely manage a C. My parents have never been strict on anything EXCEPT my grades. I don't have the heart to tell them about this. (This post will be all over the place, but I have a lot to cover.) I used to live in an RV for around half a year, that's when my depression fully started. I've been using drugs since 7th grade, and my parents don't know. They think I'm super innocent, besides the occasional graffiti run. Ive felt better in the start of 9th, I have a house, no worries, right? So it's a shock when my depression comes back. I stole some anti's from a friend and abused them. The only thing I didn't know, was that anti's don't help in the moment, they take awhile to work. I od'd, and that's when everything went to hell. I won't go into detail, but that night was the closest I've ever gotten to taking my own life. I realized I had a problem, and started using discord as a makeshift therapist. It didn't really help. I also succumb to hallucinations (not drug induced, been clean since the latter half of 9th grade) not super often but it freaks me the hell out, even though I know they aren't real. My brains fucked, pretty much. I know I should seek help, and I really want to out of fear of what I'll do to myself (cut since 6th grade) but im scared my parents will think I'm making it up because I never show sadness in front of them.

Tldr: Want to go to therapy but too scared to tell.",1.9560786873018865,3.776188566473991,3.5981633414133896,89.14501864628009,78.0751445086705,6.198620175275034,21.565914600037303,7.1029339738359605,0.5805319037851953,1308,36,275,15,31,435,182,346,0.215,0.69,0.095,-0.9933,4,1,2,0,1,0,55.0,0,0,6,4,15,19,4,5,21,0,27,6,2,7,4,52,57,22,0,5,9,3,1,0,1,4,3,0,1,0,14,14,0,0,9,1,0,6,12,15,0,2,13,1,35,4,38,39,5,41,2,3,0,1,15,18,3,4,16,173,49,11,0.0,0.10791071415757683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432774707677928,0.0,0.0728338135004784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494816774518093,0.0810773602263863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003217721744835,0.0,0.0555193656989746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805497291058087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167145202919384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845430727627363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688804597867842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112395613718398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060155143977073965,0.08238387381539675,0.0,0.0,0.08185365111383545,0.0,0.0,0.10248634015356987,0.0,0.0,0.08744768590925403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036544836903817,0.08419872123661047,0.0,0.0,0.10352170406125652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079260456068683,0.18313989736406486,0.09622728220965436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509000861890576,0.0,0.0,0.1967564148273879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20021296593634355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432999833554888,0.0,0.0,0.08042218426157081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742995079524706,0.0,0.0,0.1215884907834334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695167872679321,0.0,0.14048756386676306,0.08796221422390088,0.0,0.08546908959796583,0.0892355950826046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926775317018588,0.0,0.0,0.30338889756922194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515551781887137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722607443010964,0.09265750410757302,0.0,0.08714787368294108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366495256682692,0.11669182699659154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777788006413897,0.0,0.0,0.2735502796766516,0.09217424156039024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22601817077965144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933931650352435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20543449373356307,0.0,0.15920968373173455,0.0,0.1041538713234233,0.10574679172815317,0.06050715420102588,0.11671623827640913,0.08948216118014872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3146432828023095,0.0,0.0,0.10743851361724018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442879243338601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06630474881846493,0.09249256779269813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05865025526283067
mentalhealth,endangeredpenguin,2020/02/23,"Has anyone ever tried to section themselves? \*This is a bit of self pity so I am sorry if I go on, I just want to try to get things straight in my head these days and I am finding writing these sorts of things to be quite helpful, please feel free to ignore

I am not sure what the exact process or what the rules are in terms of sectioning oneself but I did try sometime ago. I was not well mentally and was at the stage where I did not know what to do with myself, I remember going to my local A&E and telling them I was feeling suicidal, they told me if I wasn't actually suicidal they could not help me (at least I think that is what they said, someone came to me in the the hospital to help me and spoke on my behalf and I think I got the wrong end of the stick). I looked into the idea of being sectioned and what I needed to do to. 

Sometime later I took an overdose which failed and I again approached the idea and subject and asked if I thought I could cope. They went on to explain that by being sectioned I would not be able to just get up and walk around the hospital whenever I wanted. That I could not just leave my bed whenever I wanted a cigarette. That  I would be checked on around the clock and that I would be with other people in the same room 24/7.

Some time ago I needed to spend a week in hospital after a heart related issue and then about on year ago I needed to stay overnight. I begged and pleaded with them to let me go, to let out and to let me leave but they wouldn't and it took my sister coming over from the next city near to me where she lived to calm me down and to make me realise that things would be okay.

 The reason for the two I guess is that in reality I would not wish to be sectioned. That I did not and do not understand what it was to be sectioned but now I can appreciate that if I try I can get myself out of a self imposed exile.

\--

It's weird writing this down. I hope I have not upset or offended anyone but I do feel better for  doing so and I guess that is what matters. But part of me wonders what it would have been like. To shut myself off and say f\*\*k it to the world, let the world keep turning. Am I alone?",3.2196481788079474,4.045013284768217,4.205551186534219,90.12468439569538,72.88520971302428,7.163603752759383,24.97302704194261,7.292943589461545,0.8924106512141279,1690,49,378,17,32,548,201,453,0.09699999999999999,0.818,0.084,-0.8967,0,1,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,7,3,14,15,1,1,23,1,51,2,2,2,3,100,91,33,2,22,24,1,3,1,0,7,0,3,2,2,32,29,0,2,15,0,3,10,12,7,1,1,18,7,67,9,65,50,12,67,0,2,1,0,23,38,0,12,18,301,99,1,0.07791666026409022,0.0,0.07603542080438433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072052543055559,0.0,0.0,0.0806981615983467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442266884290496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089622810184791,0.0,0.0,0.1387246938526094,0.07284155937093714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06891095417335333,0.08506481277030521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911590210698198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671183036049168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18663033925358066,0.0,0.0,0.05024979998586138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901103410396334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048008002185485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819101368964707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121441590206022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212471728928982,0.0,0.13284550085466867,0.0,0.062317071035567835,0.0,0.17166797136569306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996497238798699,0.0,0.0,0.0923316175670393,0.1566776848869329,0.0,0.0,0.07738882447626279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759168507793489,0.0,0.08132474993184746,0.0,0.06925590769700958,0.0,0.0,0.04282095878443986,0.0,0.0,0.1650049858841375,0.0,0.3187002565411044,0.0,0.038066144482503284,0.0,0.06880183851258209,0.0,0.06543037080950022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052009975759062806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07852166735212722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17332264892221672,0.0,0.0,0.08286525213609823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437615014289619,0.0,0.054017601604662784,0.0,0.0,0.0855290950360299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287395914214765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011130375292662,0.0,0.0,0.08826438713405155,0.0,0.07411658664681497,0.061962455587753575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16256813929526198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601853339264414,0.0,0.15412313865005872,0.08722132203471718,0.0,0.08304879269999177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17045635988643634,0.0,0.07343553019310725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810259538663341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529310066939386,0.09985169952075988,0.0,0.06185712487427924,0.04543383118917473,0.0,0.0,0.07445270792745813,0.17313655295827507,0.21160119094164448,0.0847509520350968,0.07611325534447276,0.08111399121352843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787179492445242,0.0,0.06250004500335714,0.0,0.07005643499213643,0.07222952467842708,0.0,0.0,0.08960031399926477,0.0,0.08449729435420507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33209855948048633,0.08518963643653805,0.0,0.05017577461202093
mentalhealth,rumblebee222,2020/02/23,"After the fact anxiety? So i normally think of social anxiety being heightened in social environments. I kindof get nervous talking to people but if i go to a bar and someone decides to strike up a conversation with me ill talk to them for a couple hours easily (though usually during the convo i wish they would just leav me alone) but since i dont want to be rude i keep up the conversation.

HOWEVER, AFTER THE CONVO ENDS and i leave the social event, bar ect. I over think the hell out of it and my stress goes threw the roof. Sometimes ill even get a sick feeling like i can break and dry heave.

Like no offense but like WTF is up with that?
People say im super social because of how i can get energetic and carry on a convo. But half the time ita fake and i just want to go home. 

Who else has this problem?",1.1513992297817737,3.5737503658536625,3.2458279845956355,87.16541078305521,84.97560975609754,5.891655969191271,20.216944801026962,7.273561745256523,0.7184439024390246,636,19,127,10,19,215,103,164,0.276,0.589,0.134,-0.9797,1,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,1,6,11,3,2,13,0,8,5,0,1,1,30,21,14,0,7,7,0,1,3,0,1,3,1,1,0,4,9,2,1,4,2,0,3,2,7,0,1,1,2,16,4,21,17,0,18,1,0,0,0,12,7,1,2,10,81,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588355244506967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007351640344154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997825533279135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14517021938363928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15376533267927442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096007004952394,0.0,0.11620418961497772,0.0,0.0,0.0866563117933479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06633862320667844,0.09372925123624401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056396341370744,0.0,0.1491278795364507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13160422019905801,0.0,0.12920549598451309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417184309052731,0.0,0.0,0.11661651987212444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778435494563304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922929657027951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854806819995684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18191501405292124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554060741462758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433544478237916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10852993212300133,0.0,0.0,0.5349671965819631,0.1111652690337091,0.0,0.12976007866195965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502890685664307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21090705675293125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813522612932102,0.12890325825044688,0.0,0.07650373020766747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444981794453367,0.0,0.15477022776601926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087343658474672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932006610194023,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EnlightenedFox,2020/02/23,"What’s wrong with me I’m nearly 21 years old. When I turned 19 for some reason I developed real bad depression after never having it my whole life. Sometimes I wouldn’t leave the house for weeks, I would just sit in bed thinking of how I could kill myself painlessly, not even brushing my teeth or showering because I didn’t see the point, until the weekend came then I would go to the pub and drink heavily while sniffing coke. It numbed me from my own thoughts for a while which I know now looking back was foolish. I was completely convinced I was going to kill myself soon so nothing really mattered to me. This went on for ages and I thought it would never change. I never told anybody I just kept it to myself.

Around September last year I started tripping on psychedelic shrooms quite often by myself, which I think had like some sort of positive effect on me that lasted a while. I started making positive changes in my life and I felt this sudden motivation to succeed and be the best I can be. This all ended near Christmas after I ran out of shrooms and reality started to hit me, I could feel myself returning back to the way I was.

These past few weeks I’ve noticed that all I can constantly think about is how/where/when I am going to kill myself, it’s like I plan it out in my head every night and it comforts me to know I’m going to kill myself soon. I think I genuinely have a mental illness that could have somehow been amplified now that the afterglow of shrooms have wore off. I don’t want to go to the doctors because I don’t want depression, or whatever is wrong with me, to be on my records. I’m not willing to take any pills, plus I’m not really open like that anyway. I’m not even sure why I’m posting this. Maybe I’m just hoping someone has a bit of real advice, it’s also nice to anonymously type out how I feel as I wouldn’t dare to express this to anybody in person. I’m sure it’s time to finally kill myself soon, I’ve planned it all out and I know I’ve finally got the courage to do it after all these years of stalling.",5.634406474820148,5.437620117505999,6.268744004796165,81.06556205035973,67.2494004796163,9.252158273381296,32.00329736211031,8.841846274778883,2.468972901678657,1627,61,328,24,24,533,197,417,0.128,0.77,0.102,-0.9289,1,0,1,0,1,5,30.0,0,0,0,7,22,23,5,0,13,0,32,10,2,6,9,73,76,21,5,11,9,0,3,3,0,6,6,0,2,1,26,17,2,1,15,3,0,9,12,11,0,0,17,6,52,12,56,46,11,71,0,2,2,0,3,18,0,8,44,229,78,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724246113092491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632127505693309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053753729480321984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036735689772282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215623990427101,0.06599978763549154,0.09637094769653094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295349728147469,0.0,0.08629734005404611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040712672953684,0.0,0.0,0.16723956133984402,0.0,0.08287782448664323,0.08542022944337836,0.0,0.1893344771645755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616374649522886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809065374415718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743461071503893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001095380803632,0.0,0.0,0.104417767762771,0.0,0.06659934070265952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993567702507112,0.0,0.07589618738294622,0.17318121725194374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22461722594318484,0.0,0.06322000008217088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112360669284244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851013227107552,0.0,0.09120802801451676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4372613126949052,0.0,0.1303242100222814,0.12886545426119236,0.0,0.08369789407464186,0.0,0.0,0.11166451249689983,0.11585308571089152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637840930604935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052763562489722436,0.0,0.07941194574064478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965938921648556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18289455623680145,0.0,0.0,0.0741789559338194,0.0,0.07584640043908134,0.08999395774464726,0.08294507710460647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545798468483515,0.0,0.06901958297333484,0.0,0.0,0.07472365693581992,0.0,0.07570384991658025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407474254985514,0.0,0.17994243262699147,0.1012772913966204,0.08127205829285791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298912189407778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697509393735153,0.0,0.07817813543065825,0.0,0.16784668158431654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489991152566434,0.0,0.059432465895487736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20259695608300887,0.0,0.12550677927089304,0.04609213436673824,0.0,0.0,0.07553147352842139,0.0,0.0,0.08597893170500255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324630465465954,0.0627427307226607,0.12681125041941466,0.0,0.0,0.07327607797065833,0.07132637369506127,0.08825160739979912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16845521306402542,0.1728479446488789,0.0,0.15270835530529586
mentalhealth,Theoctopuswitch,2020/02/23,"After a suicide attempt I developed Cotard’s Syndrome. It really sucks. As much as I try I cannot convince myself I’m alive, I can’t. I took a bunch of sleeping pills one day because I thought god wanted me to kill myself and ever since then I have been trapped in a reality where I am the only person who is alive. I think it’s because I have literally no memory of getting to the hospital so I really fear that I died, entering another reality identical to the last, only now everyone around me is just a figment of my imagination and it is a very lonely place to be. It’s absurd because the internet works and my cat is still here yet I can’t cope. I write about it and research it in case I actually am alive but I REALLY fear everything is just made up and I’m hallucinating. I cry thinking about how shocked my loved ones were to bury me and how I broke my mom’s heart. It sucks. The only thing that makes me happy is watching movies but even that feels fake like I’m just dreaming. I wanted to grow old with my boyfriend and care for my mom but I failed them. People tell me all the time I’m real but I convinced myself it’s just my brain trying to make me feel better about losing everything I care about.",1.8835733333333344,3.9609643640000014,4.0485000000000015,84.59008333333338,79.36,7.206666666666668,24.016666666666666,8.212053250817874,1.5375066666666668,961,34,196,19,24,330,137,250,0.18899999999999997,0.6759999999999999,0.135,-0.9086,0,3,0,0,0,2,15.0,0,0,1,5,19,19,3,2,11,0,16,5,3,5,2,34,37,17,3,2,8,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,13,9,0,0,6,1,0,3,4,11,0,2,5,3,39,8,23,31,3,19,0,4,1,1,8,6,2,0,11,134,52,3,0.0,0.0,0.11601294760074235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12465950129494922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058313380040096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174104610948166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051426142060546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271307520392425,0.0,0.0,0.24241888649384524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058771813102688,0.07666989083555352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338209181147973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07852129567540718,0.1075367472681903,0.0,0.11359808378970035,0.21368928129140946,0.0,0.0,0.2675535186469103,0.1202219328219988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06211161533994301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265534790284904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087727794989807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315267528014513,0.0,0.0,0.09690575323710804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808037331143826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13299999885551922,0.0,0.0,0.10729681599317334,0.1124902489846754,0.15871104621029766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784693584770747,0.0,0.0,0.08739290131655192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474802064237145,0.0,0.16111679594581838,0.2712483106774794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241870852009765,0.10380430836934228,0.1242077411143703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531521751122594,0.22847905045314765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983414908100928,0.0,0.1189691519165313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494035361131402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13003903008963266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390924054185664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898077922158951,0.1523512313313722,0.0,0.09438005748971327,0.06932180582798554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208371594205293,0.16142790831738368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809116951914466,0.14024089607167667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654845525168225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_babypink_,2020/02/23,"I'm Numb I feel absolutely emotionally numb, started cutting to atleast feel pain. How do I tell my parents that I want help.",2.1950000000000003,5.000165166666669,3.7550000000000026,82.39000000000001,84.83333333333334,6.533333333333335,33.0,7.793537801064563,2.7288500000000004,100,6,19,2,3,33,19,24,0.354,0.502,0.14300000000000002,-0.7076,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,4,6,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,8,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.434078972386092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39023934834195373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25865671061317913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41061857707683824,0.0,0.4284897797327888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27313786150948793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33728849107591063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276103644704025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dooferoofer,2020/02/23,"Is there a 'good' way to ask about medication? I've been looking into getting treatment for some of my issues, therapy wasn't as successful as I had hoped and I've been thinking about medication for a while now. I've been very wary of it and I really don't even know if I need it. I have no actual medical diagnosis, but near everyone I talk to says that it would be a good idea. Having said that, I've been looking into speaking to the psychiatrist at my university to verify if I actually have a problem that merits getting medication. In order to make an appointment, I have to meet with a counselor to be cleared. Is there a good way to ask about this? Or should I just be as direct as possible?",4.140857142857144,5.269231371428571,6.305714285714287,74.78928571428571,71.0,10.171428571428573,30.42857142857143,10.355215969177356,3.2854428571428578,552,23,108,16,10,195,81,140,0.053,0.833,0.113,0.8403,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,8,0,18,4,0,1,1,21,30,11,0,7,5,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,7,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,7,5,10,6,25,18,1,10,0,0,2,0,7,5,0,5,2,82,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.2760473342008588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644519892263336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341885883198986,0.0,0.0,0.13515063985958028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779165767348126,0.0,0.0,0.35589595187929063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404804396925143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596669591123293,0.0,0.14762514750193567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773095351691588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23754559712642176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441136123305782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5699380221904335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487492689909254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15945076564358374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353376348363078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060918644959266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13454049407155058,0.11247764860500517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368298600370977,0.0,0.0,0.16174736121779285,0.0,0.0,0.0906281413863812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670165448943025,0.0,0.22453474843209956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047392064853662,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Erramayhem89,2020/02/23,"Has caffeine ever caused depression in you? I wasn't depressed until i started drinking caffeine in October 2016. Then i started feeling very anxious, paranoid, moody and depressed. I have tried to quit a few times before and i felt better not drinking caffeine for like a day or so, but i quickly relapsed out of boredom. But i really think it causes depression, anxiety and other problems, especially in people who have addictive personalities. Now days it just makes me feel sick almost instantly and puts me in a weird state of mind. But every 4-6 hours i feel like i need some because i'm addicted.

I'm also always fatigued now.",5.640996168582376,7.653323482758617,6.5263218390804605,71.22863984674332,68.48275862068965,8.603831417624523,36.1647509578544,9.150863307647796,3.7964015325670495,508,27,77,10,9,168,82,116,0.245,0.6609999999999999,0.095,-0.9629,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,2,7,11,0,0,3,0,4,6,0,3,1,25,15,12,0,2,6,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,5,2,0,5,2,0,1,2,8,0,0,2,4,12,3,10,13,2,19,0,5,0,0,3,5,0,3,14,52,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307638378000042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14129068198142405,0.0,0.0,0.1128371508999552,0.11740601620868127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079406659841073,0.1594021761776894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601289351962663,0.0,0.12006520938522552,0.0,0.0,0.1247909659158922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898959328904261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18199489914306852,0.0,0.4861148762553527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764474184539387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763249862469073,0.11888234239168732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214032310796427,0.10080145000302317,0.13547756538560995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895450109562424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786809356072904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418495491889882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424701858522918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10462342808224673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978205680296952,0.12320256639477214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13501308390652464,0.0,0.1418438836206596,0.0,0.15007659572680584,0.0,0.0,0.0903918980675053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19974178381637145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904108075487754,0.0,0.0,0.08227620336084522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09579724052337844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642179419397294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myiwogjwotieoaogjeb,2020/02/23,Is there something wrong with me? One second I’m fine but the next second I wanna die for no apparent reason. And sometimes I feel like a spectator in my own life.,0.28181818181818485,2.701146878787881,2.3597575757575764,89.89963636363636,95.36363636363636,5.0642424242424235,18.72121212121212,6.742157984588678,0.4960957575757576,129,4,25,2,5,43,30,33,0.263,0.618,0.12,-0.7615,1,0,1,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,6,3,2,1,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,1,4,2,4,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,19,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3670628119946915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788306555561815,0.2526682441259968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.249813834264754,0.17278962316486182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3761414738663359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23966194490286846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.363640767272254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722792611670787,0.34979743037241423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3866923056572446,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kmacon16,2020/02/23,"I cry all the time, anytime I relate to literally anything sad. Why? I am a big healthy 22 year old man. To keep it short defiantly PTSD. Sexual abuse, witnessed a close family suicide, the whole shabang. What I’m wondering is very specific. Why do I actually come to tears so often just from some sad show or social media post. Thank you for any opinions.",2.1448529411764703,4.843022308823528,4.2102941176470585,80.01632352941179,83.26470588235293,7.51764705882353,26.14705882352941,8.472884824447931,2.374435294117647,279,12,51,7,8,95,58,68,0.255,0.679,0.067,-0.9403,0,0,0,0,1,1,11.0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,10,8,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,5,8,3,8,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,5,3,26,7,0,0.0,0.26038102573025323,0.21445518031122746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494451171213486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18084470060680308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189304770717415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413973027786591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071712528562009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953338064767245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23060235787128044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104704329671111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25688902275629605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22401881603722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403830281197928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023265399822686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281444931431551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18132596301718948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3966005102809348,0.2453554745227188,0.0,0.0,0.2383215915009053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14151897468102126
mentalhealth,Hevans2016,2020/02/23,"Could pregnancy have brought on bipolar??? My mom was bipolar, and I always felt so relieved to only suffer from depression, which I believe I had my whole life, anxiety and panic attacks, but something always told me I was probably bipolar. Once I turned 25, for whatever reason, I thought that since I hadn’t “become” bipolar I was in the clear (probably related to having learned that schizophrenia is usually diagnosed by age 25). However, the moment I gave birth to my son, I had my first “euphoric” moment, and it lasted nearly two straight weeks. I didn’t know that the feeling hydrocodone gave me was what everyone called “euphoria”, I just thought that that term meant “happy”. My son is four now, and I have lived on a roller coaster of 20% mania, 50% hypomania and 30% deep depression for his whole life. I feel like a completely different person. It almost feels like I have ADHD at times. On a brighter note I am nowhere near as depressed and miserable as I was when I was pregnant. Is there any specific treatment for bipolar brought on after pregnancy??? I don’t take any mental health meds and haven’t in over 5 years, but I am thinking it’s definitely time.",7.004220085470087,7.5439544861111125,7.005740740740743,74.42871794871796,64.32407407407408,10.349857549857553,37.91168091168093,10.214889679676881,4.049805270655272,923,46,159,20,13,295,132,216,0.084,0.725,0.192,0.9818,2,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,1,5,11,1,2,6,0,22,9,0,1,1,24,38,13,0,1,3,3,4,2,0,0,9,0,0,1,10,7,0,0,11,1,0,2,4,7,0,3,19,4,28,4,22,18,3,29,0,5,0,0,9,12,0,1,17,107,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473814029483298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279954194743704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20408146963569665,0.0,0.0,0.16678970716249975,0.0,0.09381414368211742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139513089871953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354388520345123,0.0,0.1381657415614145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522231699093628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857868849316426,0.0,0.0,0.09791271634341488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168716611430926,0.12447022451650305,0.0,0.128125703948554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718137953543578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860212532006056,0.17521851709422911,0.11774720554957842,0.0,0.0,0.104311827719032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305454349478377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035347003933825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06739605802222448,0.09996251231021576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732390619205243,0.11982487805282008,0.0,0.1082874562377774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13621795763527433,0.0,0.12358552912151945,0.0,0.0,0.1436266462253918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306004689257889,0.0,0.09326815553416756,0.0,0.1438837621590733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707867290226404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644388914680893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608746345796978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144353825572967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440911053590366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220498445863627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857847098188096,0.0,0.194714293909262,0.1430169342266224,0.0,0.0,0.11718137953543578,0.0,0.0,0.13338982224918586,0.11979492097034733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506326142205033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836904121279356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738314140644112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897182858714115
mentalhealth,mslambat,2020/02/23,Hi everyone. Is there anyone who can refer me to a mental health home in India? Thanks. Mental health home in India?,0.8022727272727295,3.1408924090909096,2.6459090909090897,85.88886363636364,102.1818181818182,4.0181818181818185,10.045454545454547,5.985473137389443,-0.7158545454545453,91,1,15,1,4,30,17,22,0.0,0.86,0.14,0.504,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181410756771866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479118822144389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5515581782490171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5204912167030629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5229213252216094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23886312598310294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oliveoil__,2020/02/23,"I’m tired (warning too much details, bad english)


i don’t even know how to put this into words but i’ll try my best. ever since i was little ive always felt so left out and different, my siblings would always make fun of the way i look and my skin tone since i’m the darkest my cousins also did the same and whenever there’s a family gathering they end up making fun of me with my siblings and i think it affected me so much i became an introvert with social anxiety. 
my partners were abusive, mostly my mom she would beat me up and say mean stuff, to this day she’s still the same. my dad was only abusive during a period of time i remember when i was in first grade he would get mad at me for not understanding a hw in a foreign language and he’d throw the book at me. and when i was 4 i shared a bedroom with my two sisters and one night the kicked me out and locked the door while they laughed and i was telling them to open the door over and over my dad came with a knife and put it on my neck and said if u don’t shut up i’ll kill you. i was so terrified and i think that’s why i still remember it to this day. my life got better when i moved to another school in 2nd grade i made friends and everything was nice then after i finished 4th grade we had to move to another city and my life got scary again i went to elementary school by myself while my sisters went to middle school together. people at my school were different and mean i had a hard time making friends and i started having anxiety everyday the teachers were also scary. my sisters didn’t like the city and they were making up stories about their school and our house they said they can see a ghost of me and i walk everywhere in the house and that made me even more depressed. i didn’t wanna go to school anymore and one morning my sisters refused to go and i didn’t wanna go either then my mom hit me so hard with so many objects she broke a kitchen spoon on my back, threw my shoes at me, pulled my hair, i curled up and froze in place. she didn’t hit my sisters just me, then she took me to a creepy looking room outside the house and locked the door. i stayed there in the dark with cockroaches for a while and cried. there was another door leading outside and as i went my i saw my sisters looking at me like i’m a ghost. they got to stay home without going through what i did and they ran away to my moms room ofc and i went in and they were all screaming looking at me in fear. my mom got up and locked her room door and they all slept there together. 
moving to middle school my life was somewhat better i had like three friends and at home i wouldn’t really talk to my mom or siblings in fact i never felt close to them. people would still make fun of me at school for being quiet and i get asked what’s your name often. they know my name though. after two years me and my parents moved to another country for one semester and once again i’m having a hard time at school not knowing how to talk or make friends and i failed most classes. then we went back and after one year we moved outside the country again and i went to a private school i was okay with it, things were going fine for me until senior year i got so depressed and i didn’t have friends. the school head master and the principal hated me for dumb reasons they would attack me just for walking in the hallway. and my friend which’s a junior didn’t like me hanging out with my senior classmates and i felt so much pressured. two months before graduation i dropped out of school yes my life is now turning to actual hell. my parents took me back home and i was prisoner there for two years just being a slave for my mom and brother. i’d do all the chores including cleaning their clothes and making them food. on top of that they were so rude. i started feeling unreal, having nightmares, sleep paralysis,derealization. i used to feed stray cats and it helped me a bit. one day i found a cat that looked like it was abandoned and he was.. i let him in and when he would go outside he’d come back to me. i was more than happy to keep him cause i’ve always wanted a cat but my mom refuses. anyway i’m still going through the same things but with this cat life was good. until my mom and brothers would kick him outside and threat to kick him whenever they want me to do something. they were using my love for the cat. and it was so hard tbh. cause he wanted to mate and would take longer to come back, sometimes he comes with blood on him. sometimes he comes back after two days, whenever i listen to them or not they still let him out. i told them to stop but they never did. 
i would wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of the door opening and id rush to stop them. i had enough and kept the cat in my room and at night i’d sleep against the door cause i my mom took my key and i’m not allowed to lock my door. i slept against the door for a while and to wake me up my mom would slam the door open knowing i’m on the other side and it would hurt my neck. my brother would hit me. i hated them all. we had another stray cat and she was just born. my other cat took care of her until she got older. they had kids, if i had a choice i wouldn’t make that happen. they don’t care about cats enough to get them spayed or neutered. one day my dad was going to my sisters where they were going to college and took me with him. i took my cat with me although he’s under my dads name. i finally went to school again and finished senior year but it wasn’t easy. i was depressed everyday and just went with the flow. my mom came after with the other cats and she loved them. they’re also under my dads name. i take care of them and do everything for them by myself . 
life’s great with my cats. feeling better. 
i didn’t go to college and i never got any help from my family. they pay for my sisters but not me. i wanted to get a job but i couldn’t. i thought about taking baking, pottery, violin,sewing classes so i can do my own thing and maybe start a business but i got no support. 
years went by and my life’s still the same. i started getting along with my sisters and i wish i didn’t. they’re still the same. evil. one time one of my sisters ordered food using my other sisters card and she found out and asked her where did u get the food from? she said my friends. then she asked then who ordered from my card? the bitch blamed it on me and guess what she believed her and beat me up. they were never nice. my one friend from high school is still toxic and i can never really talk to her about anything unless it’s about her. 
i met someone online and we started dating. i never saw him in person until after a year passed by. my sisters found out and got mad at me even though they’ve done worse.
two years later he insisted that if i move in with him he would help me achieve my dreams and i did in fear of going back and experiencing the same thing again. i took all my cats with me. he promised to be nice, rn things are not going as expected and i’m scared of him. he tried to rape me, constantly blaming me for everything. he smokes all the time and says it’s because of me even though he did the same before i knew him. he don’t want to breakup. not letting me leave. i’m scared to go back, i’m scared of staying. he’s never really home and i’m always by myself. i love my cats i wanna protect them but i’m scared i can’t. my boyfriend doesn’t like staying with me unless he’s high, 
my moms threatening me to give her back the cats or she’ll hire a lawyer against me cause they’re under my dads name. she’s blaming me for kidnapping. my boyfriend doesn’t care anymore. but yet he doesn’t want me leaving. he gets mad at me whenever i mention leaving. 
i’m currently so depressed and experiencing derealization again. so terrified. i feel like i don’t know my family or him i don’t even know who i am. i wanna die but i love my cats and i know no one would ever take good care of them. 
yesterday i got high with my boyfriend i told him i need u to stay with me tonight. he skates everyday. but he stayed with me and i wish he didn’t. he got mad later on and started attacking me for wanting to leave then he went to sleep. his mom doesn’t like me being here and i don’t feel comfortable talking to her. about an hour ago he woke up and showed me a hurtful text from her saying he should take actions himself and tell me to leave cause i’m not healthy for him. i woke up dizzy and i don’t feel like leaving yet, my heart hurts and i have t eaten since friday. i’m disappointed and hurt . knowing that whether i left or not i’m still gonna be suffering. 
his mom think i’m making him depressed cause he didn’t leave the house yesterday. but it’s not my fault that i need someone to stay with me even though he ignored me and went to sleep. 
i don’t know what to do. i feel like i’m dead and i’m only watching my past life experiences. my life is flashing in my head. it’s sad . i think i’m dreaming and i can’t wait to wake up .  
sorry i know this it’s too much to read but it’s the hell im living in
i hate talking, i’m insecure about my voice and everything.",1.3221364490470648,3.286686429168846,2.6114464616210564,94.7574381260508,80.68322007318349,5.578976278944915,21.161241011005774,6.617960597712423,0.20154423305689395,7141,207,1611,69,185,2297,509,1913,0.157,0.732,0.111,-0.9988,8,0,2,0,2,1,136.0,6,2,36,12,84,93,18,8,70,2,117,40,18,26,16,323,309,166,5,37,44,38,16,10,10,19,10,11,23,3,46,143,7,10,34,5,1,57,49,45,0,18,111,38,325,48,219,165,28,270,2,15,9,5,205,86,4,15,126,1047,371,35,0.0,0.05102489858239339,0.02101257915234081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01908723048993041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0516585119871055,0.07166694121929035,0.0,0.0,0.014642814166978546,0.11289333183163992,0.032944552647558745,0.0,0.04270883746435968,0.0,0.0,0.01771938351065741,0.0,0.060389842615567915,0.04899257354929376,0.02023045910270703,0.1490142239873334,0.01797870835660503,0.013125990436928648,0.0,0.03664508251518585,0.02425971377185138,0.022596992933081192,0.05713114481563138,0.023507874257888285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04925480590349385,0.10976891256148144,0.13271863393210825,0.0,0.07419324583985648,0.0,0.023268944460829367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023652401049193014,0.06943329098609545,0.0,0.09272940014976563,0.0,0.022347298502339824,0.04499368467873428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02203518698610576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019071372278258048,0.044497583417257264,0.0,0.08533193792482995,0.03895469360083148,0.0,0.0,0.07740796230081871,0.021062881932433167,0.060896673268693635,0.048460017647370936,0.06532476585191473,0.04614839059447445,0.062023627676150224,0.0235877622441032,0.0,0.018315503212911508,0.07811142424460535,0.07082770740773084,0.13308742861221126,0.0,0.07874876747992934,0.0206559019052824,0.15908614449570518,0.036120819064167614,0.1894362668354629,0.023739618009676524,0.02372043712050716,0.0,0.019041087150768018,0.02292170874100988,0.07715543475676286,0.06377655212495956,0.044197041166909326,0.0,0.0,0.025516073980604626,0.04329827099348881,0.06825069253694042,0.08639526974447681,0.0,0.021205140042558503,0.0993822916225416,0.09220379391136546,0.0,0.02325875653399584,0.0,0.021367648396396648,0.01913904370956952,0.023822481550957283,0.0,0.11833679307858627,0.0,0.0,0.1595983952491637,0.04679017113250057,0.06605521113314271,0.13688114752328326,0.10519674455683682,0.021581186103257526,0.019013560552147826,0.0,0.09040923500237644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773555919326629,0.04074907688393036,0.12935778466252085,0.021830539240684985,0.021632254642798783,0.0469103323646681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3530598687697303,0.017187007646884127,0.13731361186901905,0.06331535554416018,0.03193209902124507,0.11625014782000788,0.0,0.0,0.060620277551367126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02293137183504269,0.14590955137327224,0.032752818921927496,0.0,0.0,0.047818507026368785,0.0,0.020555173712351243,0.02985579924013888,0.018801317362191053,0.022496842339367138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04329214804328746,0.0,0.0,0.02153829138377328,0.0,0.04138274418145819,0.022138959622993545,0.0,0.0,0.048784169308632726,0.0,0.061446913567724665,0.051370439805706936,0.08623101290513488,0.30508804940926243,0.017158586303742656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053435631168974325,0.0,0.08619205952549992,0.021949635801590008,0.0364887744095815,0.016576743070843274,0.04259231573694162,0.02410383099925743,0.09144473474655904,0.1606551944025025,0.15476268491057424,0.036004208785136126,0.0,0.0,0.024649520133135608,0.0,0.024434785422049285,0.0,0.0,0.08094866737679096,0.08653489621961988,0.03764064592272133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152606278993401,0.0551885349611884,0.08462214775973445,0.017094371528513654,0.0627787657355594,0.0247484002664027,0.0,0.04115038496220482,0.1674635215599805,0.029238259789669676,0.02342113805689657,0.12620453353570504,0.022416054816366108,0.0,0.05579140722941333,0.0,0.0,0.08890283770178578,0.01709146798152903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21956891238632786,0.019429699954188064,0.0,0.04952254278510102,0.02075652728717053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021943420786472632,0.21414462871589246,0.0,0.0,0.11092960879667373
mentalhealth,HarisHero,2020/02/23,"Deppresion So for the past 20 days I felt so much happier with my life, I was finally getting and feeling that joy in life. My self-esteem was so high it was crazy. I started to exercise, school was getting easier, it was my wish for all this to happen' until today. Today an accident happened to me, its not even slightly serious but after that I started to get depressed again, its like all those 20 amazing days never existed, all that encouragement and joy just disappeared, it felt like everything just fell in the water. Any ideas what is happening/happened with me?",9.343018867924528,7.9870823584905635,9.26479245283019,66.39813207547171,60.32075471698114,13.008301886792452,41.01132075471698,11.979248473330829,5.085206037735849,454,21,76,12,5,149,68,106,0.083,0.67,0.247,0.9628,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,0,3,0,6,4,0,0,4,17,17,7,0,1,4,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,11,4,1,0,4,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,7,3,9,6,12,10,4,17,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,14,57,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466854397970408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21749410435186986,0.0,0.14523363033950273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113730480724229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515463186968497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526020226980059,0.0,0.32380656690989845,0.1847168393607268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26429364906460223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.447334859502575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815809287230527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19035338405039107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382049987231189,0.16476009860099747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239563575179935,0.0,0.13005145669731685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16096850058785964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17065417115877718,0.0,0.0,0.17590921686315908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387026261578666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196673262411401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19390664289608656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ran_Mori,2020/02/23,I can't stop about thinking sucide I even have dreams about killing myself but I always can't die. It's driving me crazy ever single second it is haunting me. I really want to die so badly. I even prepared everything. Idk what to do anymore.,0.07666666666666799,2.1709849999999977,2.2233333333333327,88.62166666666668,105.25,3.8,19.916666666666668,5.82211442006289,0.3981916666666669,192,7,34,2,9,64,36,48,0.255,0.47600000000000003,0.26899999999999996,-0.0438,0,0,0,0,0,2,5.0,0,0,0,0,6,2,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,5,7,2,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,8,0,4,7,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,27,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295072233223137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273542766888196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23030107682259784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5725224312094841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3643576019969872,0.2494981203772062,0.0,0.0,0.2478923502028479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051578036058611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17669957814966533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306007720047429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17673654271656666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16268782931771153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Princess_Sparklez_,2020/02/23,"I think I have some sort of work anxiety but I don’t know why or where it would be coming from Hello! first of all I’m not sure if this is the right sub so correct me if there’s a better place for me to go. 

So I work at a movie theater. I love my job, i love the people I work with. There’s nothing really wrong with my job. Every time I’m here, however, it seems like I have some sort of health issue I have a heart condition that makes my heart race for little to no reason and it happens so much more at work. There was a time my heart rate was up to about 180 (my resting heart rate is about 80) for about 5 hours but as soon as I left to go to the hospital it calmed right down. I’ve also noticed I have more issues with my chest and stomach when I’m at work. I’ve talked to my doctor about this and they say it’s stress related but I don’t ever feel stressed at work. I’m wondering if it could be something mentally, does anyone here have any experience with something like this or know if anything that could help? Thank you 💝",1.4620084965777664,2.930144816143496,3.00978994571631,94.38847297616242,78.4170403587444,6.309086617890017,20.25702147746047,7.0608816371341465,0.1726466367713,806,19,191,9,19,265,118,223,0.057,0.785,0.157,0.9798,3,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,8,17,11,0,2,7,0,16,10,6,2,4,37,34,19,0,7,10,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,11,8,0,0,7,0,0,3,4,3,0,1,2,2,23,8,29,27,7,22,0,0,0,2,8,12,0,12,9,121,34,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942489111796433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06753991991657568,0.0,0.07597830656491418,0.0,0.0,0.06944573675182694,0.0,0.08173058331777205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878390565635885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555401006309271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15859532660982986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165659410723477,0.08691420389328959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983918173694172,0.08368003822322731,0.0,0.0,0.09715245599011564,0.0,0.0,0.05021836881780415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448018298432595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288987460964706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782693590331722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055708182127454,0.0,0.4707711437387066,0.06657103209074937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780862093599167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20732521831907827,0.1971163800948469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916559394349397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790973562645602,0.0,0.0,0.09704391002756672,0.0995431318390824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17927747298819918,0.0,0.0662958053240503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008959043956817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301045403870758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529868645656248,0.11307466026658218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885487539245416,0.0,0.10376659244936737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06362591225227922,0.10211585989702038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696347472506751,0.0,0.07898198053534038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041574409129784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529203180092569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275377904976923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360641958581033,0.0,0.0,0.07982837033939222,0.0,0.09143904177414018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06363922243849887,0.0,0.0,0.11582671915083274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961941085534766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077065715789962,0.4338298822271026,0.0,0.0,0.07055294401503805,0.1085890825826664,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HeatherMVannatter,2020/02/23,"How to Become Healthy Becoming healthy is a process that involves time, commitment, and a willingness to change. However, with some dedication you can start building habits you can feel good about 

[https://health-nest.blogspot.com/2019/07/how-to-become-healthy.html](https://health-nest.blogspot.com/2019/07/how-to-become-healthy.html)",29.209999999999994,35.32468651515153,10.869242424242424,46.52386363636367,17.181818181818187,13.872727272727275,49.83333333333334,13.023866798666859,7.347133333333334,297,11,24,6,2,56,28,33,0.0,0.667,0.33299999999999996,0.9001,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,1,6,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,4,5,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6293607729136933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30141584860268145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406806458419855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238983933240602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6057298878687686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20167337424855114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16614370048277932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bruisechickthrowaway,2020/02/23,"I hurt myself often but I don't think I can get help Teenaged girl here.

So I'm oddly inclined to ask for advice regarding this, despite any common sense. If this happens to get popular, I'll probably delete it-- so there's that, I guess. (Pardon my format, I'm on mobile.

I don't work out too much, but at least for fifteen minutes every day. No equipment, just a hell of a lot of crunches/planking etc. (I'm female for reference) Anyway, the next day, I crave the muscle pain to the point of obsession. I don't know why, it's just always been like that, but recently feel like this is taking over a part of my life. I get super depressed during the day if it's not hurting like it should, and that's making me feel a compulsion to work out more and more.... It's the strangest thing, because the other day I found a pretty big bruise on my leg. Pretty sure it's from getting hit by a ball when outside with friends, but I felt like I should push on it. So I did. And again and again and again, so the next day I took a particularly sharp mechanical pencil and jabbed it into another place on that leg with all of my strength.

Lo and behold, six hours later there was another bruise.

It's been going like that for a few days now, giving myself a few more small bruises every day so I can run my fingers along them the next day. Plus, I really just like how they look on my thigh, but I find that as spots get filled up I have to move lower, which frightens me because I really don't want anyone to find out about this. Never.

I know that I probably need to speak to someone, but I also know that there's a good chance they wouldn't understand. It's not self harm-- but it is, I know it is, but not in the sense that people would imagine. I don't dislike myself, I have pretty good self esteem, no trauma, not punishing myself for anything. Hell, I'm not even remotely depressed. But at the same time, I feel like the fallout would be much worse if someone like a family member or a friend happened to find out.

What should I do?

I've had a /lot/ of mental health issues in the past, but family is adamant about me having to be normal. It's basically a screaming match every time I mention something having to do with the subject, so what are my options? 

I know that I have a bit of an obsession with therapists in general and a really big part of me wants to play games with them and it's in me so deep that I can't help that. So maybe that's not the best thing? I don't know, so any advice is welcome.",3.046747480794174,4.283953260700393,4.334435797665371,87.46093335328743,73.78599221789885,7.139499151950513,23.879876284545546,7.61054688173877,0.9988631746981942,1952,55,412,24,39,644,230,514,0.114,0.705,0.18100000000000002,0.9892,1,0,1,0,0,2,71.0,0,0,4,5,30,32,3,2,31,0,35,7,4,2,3,84,71,37,0,13,23,0,6,8,2,6,3,2,0,3,37,21,0,0,18,3,0,6,17,13,0,1,8,9,51,19,55,54,17,54,2,4,1,0,17,24,2,9,32,285,88,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834269699302335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05660761108638044,0.05889969794287801,0.0,0.0,0.09627393794633853,0.14845077591471464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04949528041298664,0.0,0.058250921206098,0.0,0.06617543930036335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630108764604069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428563494028861,0.0,0.07728007750921495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3652093796494447,0.0,0.1219359122367644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894520248798106,0.04675354524828027,0.0,0.1789210029535377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346165285244954,0.0,0.10737472288914604,0.10113919455080148,0.06796574772680944,0.0,0.19409161325771546,0.0,0.0,0.07761329470886733,0.10937831602534807,0.0,0.18491405377747197,0.06790446821142558,0.040229366559671416,0.11874402876042757,0.0,0.0,0.07797885930116091,0.0,0.12519181230325793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524230421143609,0.0,0.0,0.09489284885805148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697100404785765,0.0,0.15155594806116873,0.0,0.0,0.07388228779296878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23341310509782984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0499983091911332,0.2766600666273845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05944248817978925,0.0,0.0,0.12035960580386552,0.0,0.0,0.04725026514507125,0.0,0.07111414231482867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133573026852633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523441189602832,0.10407184270041568,0.05248698925990046,0.054594596902375024,0.0,0.2258454312427684,0.0,0.06935533948753933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753213911993421,0.0,0.0,0.15330887615257088,0.06757333310019915,0.049074162428856614,0.0,0.07395639863589502,0.0,0.06691573571277651,0.0,0.0,0.21604470662744052,0.15263875607739766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13604214667831838,0.0,0.06989272477961803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14769066075758586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995364972834535,0.05449459084694745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667150526808038,0.0,0.05322233070093015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218810703548357,0.09405426650995903,0.04535686864572098,0.0,0.0,0.08255187736252073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864595122558446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369081673041065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350294049210498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387343670330344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306623404447034,0.0,0.07213707375633448,0.10056881563414874,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bronegro,2020/02/23,"Powerful interview on mental health from boxing heavy weight champion Tyson Fury https://youtu.be/tfEOl-CaTAE

This interview really affected me. Just shows no matter what you have in life you can struggle with mental health",11.188181818181818,15.363130848484854,8.366666666666667,54.670000000000016,58.6969696969697,12.884848484848485,32.21212121212121,11.855464076750405,5.739048484848485,190,7,21,7,3,55,29,33,0.23,0.5920000000000001,0.17800000000000002,-0.3167,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,4,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,13,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6119926448451823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20333373492712706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5802180395262607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844192882994008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009481355502377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505526598333895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stfuami,2020/02/23,"Poor memory? I’ve always had pretty good memory. I can remember the most random things from years ago and I can go pretty well without writing instructions down if I pay attention hard enough. 

However, my mental health has deteriorated quite a bit over the past year and I find it more difficult to recall things now. Normally I’d have no problem recalling a conversation from a few days ago but now I find myself putting in more effort to recall them. 

I haven’t been diagnosed with anything but I know that I’ve always been an anxious person and the past year took a toll on my overall mental health, and I’m still trying to get back up, but are there any scientific reasoning for the decline in my memory? And does it even have anything to do with my mental health or am I just overreacting?",6.7530628654970775,7.0885352565789495,7.454561403508773,71.69804093567255,64.85526315789474,10.966081871345027,31.362573099415197,10.746095033038511,3.4104011695906435,637,22,114,16,9,212,97,152,0.08900000000000001,0.858,0.053,-0.483,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,2,8,4,0,0,9,0,12,4,0,1,0,25,17,10,0,3,7,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,6,0,2,3,3,2,1,0,4,1,14,2,16,13,6,21,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,4,12,80,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219246171486809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20580123571081896,0.0,0.0,0.08409761037874279,0.0,0.0,0.13970819337764248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035343471053927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509207426381026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13501202894663922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975480377031112,0.0,0.0,0.12551911773482638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822158013253184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277807800586284,0.0,0.08168070229570018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22605828351492796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646107570952359,0.0,0.07028264693202027,0.10372577748988253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078109058792404,0.0,0.0,0.3943558216408978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796399520138385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738809014054945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211671287645784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23610775502799206,0.0,0.10798100994126696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516270266548674,0.0,0.11833234957782643,0.0,0.12431921067514612,0.0,0.1315347792610217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127149984923247,0.0,0.0,0.14009028648400068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876040241657703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16431734752185426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13739827631692614,0.08396158524941091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119123314356454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11921030511666998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389119395100707
mentalhealth,MaddiLouu02,2020/02/23,"my friend is telling me that hes said, what should I say to him? I just dont wanna tell him the wrong thing. he keeps saying that hes sad and that he has no one he could trust. hes a good guy and I just want to make him happy! thanks 😢",-2.3748214285714297,-0.7046902678571385,-0.037857142857141916,109.58285714285715,94.53571428571428,3.2,9.785714285714286,3.1291,-2.4006142857142865,179,1,53,0,7,59,40,56,0.131,0.594,0.275,0.8478,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,1,0,10,13,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,1,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,3,11,5,3,10,0,0,0,1,0,0,16,0,0,0,0,32,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19690096097040707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890294030708286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19053312189482524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068478591391916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24418632148717198,0.0,0.26252485429343075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192015751504996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16461655025594502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16711181590819096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345860891584537,0.3922342025881765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4311024626490248,0.22704874828796465,0.0,0.0,0.16383917468172934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454591414231635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696333513537048,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stressking12,2020/02/23,"Almost got fooled by a transsexual in the club (it was a close one) I was in the club and gave a girl my number. It was dark in there and loud so I didn’t think nothing of it. I always do a back ground check with their numbers just to see who I am dealing with. The pictures seem really edited and a lot of make up on the social
Medias. But Something just seemed weird. I never met up with the person. We just texted and It was a short conversation I just left it alone. The person hits me up two weeks later about meeting at the club. (Thank god I was tired.) And didn’t end up going. I would probably found out there. After the club The person calls me and wants me to come see her, it was being really thirsty and asking are you alone. I just said this is weird. Something is up. “Girls aren’t usually this easy” she barley knows my name. I say something seems really off. I go back to the social media’s and find out this might not be a female. I texted and said this is kind of weird but something is up. The person sends back a message and says she is a transsexual. Once I found out I BLOCKED the number. 

This is funny story but I felt so embarrassed and disappointed in my self. Even tho I dodged a bullet and could of been in a crazy situation This situation could of been really bad. I’m not drinking in the club no more and now I got to ask baby pictures. 

I’m a straight male and love women.. And like damn that was close. I’m just trying to get over it and move on but I keep thinking about it. Like damn I didn’t noticed 
It was a Tran or no one in the club told me. Probably no one was paying attention which is a good thing.
It was a upscale straight club smh they usually don’t let everybody in. 

Is this something to get therapy for?",0.7640055248618793,2.987445883977905,2.542814917127074,92.95090745856356,84.63535911602209,5.608950276243094,18.442265193370172,6.961326702584282,0.10854674033149214,1358,34,300,18,40,448,170,362,0.13,0.7859999999999999,0.084,-0.9439,1,2,6,0,0,0,36.0,1,1,2,0,18,15,2,1,29,0,35,3,0,1,1,62,69,24,0,4,13,0,1,2,0,2,1,5,0,9,21,26,1,2,11,8,2,5,11,9,0,4,25,8,33,6,41,36,2,45,0,1,2,1,36,29,2,7,13,208,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719709739707772,0.18037528349991516,0.0,0.0,0.07245675147705226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16281432763615608,0.0,0.0,0.20087526010927892,0.07270737559661862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891745358154655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501089740449722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390510832208749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897746845042416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530432486435313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771261983828125,0.0,0.0,0.05751489612070891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08360955088036963,0.0,0.07958868085216793,0.0,0.0,0.19095538355695785,0.0,0.0,0.09099042682468388,0.0,0.09897807006481628,0.07303778187132957,0.1392901539798546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773998672179664,0.0,0.09067943814867037,0.047856372608120014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946116506058945,0.0890442359319421,0.0,0.08508485778096002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403150058650823,0.07859224905611165,0.0,0.058125946964304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237711886413684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255125706348137,0.0,0.0,0.0671607372856409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355470406711342,0.09914008395456808,0.0,0.09273635412989192,0.1770210686620298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30413629634563694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18777190378110772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22314029571278432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16566424889584064,0.13849752301198556,0.0,0.0,0.13878146909645886,0.23782051006546756,0.09084244805781716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19576101787259612,0.0,0.1775322656979292,0.0,0.3351885632478324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017069657199444,0.09958249110033557,0.0,0.05785145639013056,0.11159348770947962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008456658254518,0.0,0.0832077709935512,0.0,0.0591209639244755,0.0,0.08506358595374727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19181055847955134,0.0,0.05136148416845257,0.0,0.06984956728226734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618584639246534,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BanjoKazooie88,2020/02/23,"Panic Attack at work. Fear I’ll be fired now. On Friday I had a severe panic attack at work. I was overwhelmed with emails and everything being labeled “URGENT” that triggered one of the worst panic attacks of all time. I took a walk around my building and came back feeling slightly better. I sit next to my manager and she said something that triggered me and next thing you know I blurted, “guess I’ll just hang myself”. Instead of being empathetic and getting to the root of my issue, she scolded me and immediately got up and left. 

I’m so embarrassed and never got a chance to apologize to her as it was 5pm. 

Am I going to get fired?",3.7730400000000017,5.492734024000001,5.144200000000001,80.44510000000002,72.75999999999998,6.920000000000001,27.7,7.554174236665415,1.73468,503,19,91,6,10,168,83,125,0.281,0.637,0.08199999999999999,-0.985,0,0,1,0,0,1,11.0,0,1,0,3,6,11,3,6,5,0,7,0,0,3,2,20,19,10,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,11,0,0,2,0,0,5,1,10,0,1,8,4,16,1,16,8,2,18,0,1,0,0,7,6,0,1,6,65,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578440152995946,0.0,0.4822376476178578,0.0,0.10864877044023401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249658282001776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616062735772018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698874864262208,0.0,0.0,0.1589985530512778,0.07144407391984964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764383614422005,0.0,0.0803024145972932,0.0,0.22601644357959935,0.0,0.15565471755906676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14747749251650094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776532068524513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15351974407489452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897705656696842,0.0,0.30054219931867604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574659140046757,0.0,0.0,0.4973452100995141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440592638421092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15962553712727354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877743304783412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387153402880637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239149219410664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569863093008882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057319854873776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zu_H_Reddit,2020/02/23,"I have nightmares where i murder people I've been having nightmares where I murder people in cold blood. Not people I hate, people who I hold very close to me (parents, friends etc.). I feel terrible after waking up, but during my dreams I feel smug, or accomplished. It feels terrible when I wake up, that I did such a thing. Pls help.",4.177968749999998,5.866457109375002,4.705125000000002,84.12737500000003,71.65625,6.995000000000001,23.7375,7.554174236665415,1.1382850000000002,261,7,48,3,5,83,46,64,0.16399999999999998,0.579,0.257,0.6955,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,4,7,3,0,1,0,4,3,3,0,0,8,8,3,2,0,3,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,2,4,11,1,5,6,1,8,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,2,33,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28226965171508345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3839197909149344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955418327944484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24988052884971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696453397626801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810338618135242,0.0,0.0,0.7018613570146556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814615843265235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088312307547061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TryingMistake,2020/02/23,"I am scared of myself For a week or so I have been feeling so stressed and I don't want to be in contact with anyone. This feels strange for me because I am usually talkative and cheerful. 
Last night I couldn't stop crying. I cried for like 3 hours to the point I needed to drink a big glass of water. I had a weird feeling inside me, like I was empty. It was agonizing. I couldn't breathe properly and the idea of dying wasn't so bad. I was so scared of what I can do to myself. I go to the doctor regularly, i take depression pills but I don't go to therapy (I know that's not good, but I can't afford therapy right now. I've had a therapist for 7 years but right now it's difficult to make ends meet)
I tried to call suicide hotline last night but I felt so stupid thinking there were more people needing more than I did.
Right now I have this agonizing feeling in my chest, feels like my whole body is going to stop working. Every single part of me hurts physically and I don't know what to do. My mom is really chill and she said these pains could be because I cleaned the whole house yesterday by myself and I am not used to exercise but of course, I can't even put to words to describe what I am feeling to her.",1.9402911931818208,3.568171367187503,3.698181818181818,89.27409090909092,77.515625,6.998295454545455,24.13636363636364,7.84624498591911,1.1304437499999995,954,32,211,15,22,320,132,256,0.184,0.7170000000000001,0.099,-0.9798,2,0,1,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,0,1,10,15,1,3,8,0,30,9,3,2,0,37,50,17,2,6,8,1,7,3,0,0,4,1,1,0,9,7,2,2,11,2,0,4,10,10,0,0,11,8,37,5,29,34,6,26,0,2,0,0,7,7,0,1,18,143,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07476265829617894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927577384704306,0.13035785780853196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187667303606651,0.0,0.0,0.10917976906555098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536887046842134,0.0,0.23489856613993784,0.0,0.0,0.09209214357939212,0.0,0.1109686150759714,0.0,0.0,0.10943965121937613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474328845282728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470154833681503,0.0,0.0,0.07062126526744529,0.0,0.09008676985099093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32437919939137594,0.07638541472500028,0.10266231306794488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822994653516473,0.08968147238335647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529706858161696,0.1233741436719416,0.1144626867764712,0.12070242363158575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11752355694436707,0.17431212377313882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15671071453335622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137156104520098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522627310659712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585632735198546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006789394757456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137730180664196,0.0,0.0,0.11578658637681458,0.0,0.07412655926436845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010762691308864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748658750686432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849725496467822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739335466160332,0.10170772839484213,0.0,0.2140960366569396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17878390022732976,0.12247929733425282,0.0,0.0,0.11695579855233484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039237055975637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445502641691332,0.12414519750233415,0.0,0.06851158420864255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259332030114055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234666094336952,0.11775996520146595,0.0,0.06306562721381599,0.0,0.08576673440397874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387501786331717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778408120273924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885454777563671
mentalhealth,swagswagdab,2020/02/23,"Why do I cry all the time I’ve started crying for no reason a lot recently. I can just sit in class and randomly get super sad and start crying. Sometimes I get random anxiety attacks out of nowhere too. My friends have started to notice. I really hate talking about my problems and this one friend keeps on asking what’s wrong and today he told me that he feels like I don’t trust him and that I seem to not want to be his friend since he has told me everything about him and his problems, even things he hasn’t told anyone else before.

I don’t know why I’m so sad, there’s really nothing wrong in my life, I guess I’m just tired of it all. Tomorrow the actual treatment of my anxiety is starting, but this is something way different I haven’t felt before.",6.520145161290323,5.470758651612903,6.963669354838711,79.64550403225809,65.70967741935485,10.330645161290324,32.27822580645161,9.516144504307137,2.691532258064516,601,20,123,10,8,197,96,155,0.203,0.73,0.068,-0.9199,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,8,14,2,0,3,0,11,2,0,1,2,26,31,8,0,3,4,0,2,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,5,0,0,0,6,8,0,1,4,2,19,6,13,26,3,14,0,2,0,0,16,4,0,5,9,72,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.11001917542890652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724934616964828,0.0,0.0,0.07883128799501969,0.11551671124742195,0.0,0.0,0.1053978292507082,0.12825942272376625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19186896252076024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3715228351760138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11779058753268562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418082937148964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446451781871959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132454614714956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057005352381293437,0.08054235582355251,0.1082492590837646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613107793023673,0.0,0.1178052768347078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419717322138925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130862178025508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020958360982864,0.0,0.0,0.06195963048142445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963246350405773,0.05507966923070075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584856039730674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081782489319868,0.12835663534348565,0.0,0.0,0.0763963738716044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21575625835755988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14444983514623952,0.11591675942856668,0.11131836146569374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263537972412096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326070885303983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679370536709435,0.1115039572965496,0.0,0.31919528587112195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061712851987512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490026229310451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574031669883143,0.12957945670324028,0.10686550167625296,0.32318722437408426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664976973101152,0.08948873912928987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20346284502183065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24652966884864835,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saturatedsilence,2020/02/23,"I've been self-harming harming for ~12yrs without really seeing it as a problem worth trying to quit. Should I be taking it more seriously? I realize that self-harming is an unusual behavior and that it is of course physically harmful (even though the ""injuries"" are so minor and controlled). However I don't do it very often, much less so than I used to; and the cuts are just superficial injuries that are easily concealed, so it doesn't seem very problematic to me. But I doubt myself sometimes. Should I be taking it more seriously?",7.18242424242424,7.825989414141418,8.008636363636363,67.03295454545456,63.94949494949496,11.044444444444444,36.7020202020202,10.864195022040775,4.3418808080808065,428,20,70,11,6,144,64,99,0.153,0.778,0.069,-0.8138,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,7,7,1,1,4,0,13,0,0,2,0,15,18,9,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,3,7,0,0,1,1,8,0,8,13,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,57,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25351551950017964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14929283552437678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16616045277939082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21628330200664145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404141934879599,0.0,0.0,0.1448026933613581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18011924246689948,0.20577218939948835,0.4716039694504198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235526723951484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3398977605382864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220765289253576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15346174536584636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952201622448018,0.0,0.3730022208994703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21788799525944647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,billytehcow,2020/02/23,"My girlfriend of nearly 2 years left me without warning I'm only 16, but this hit really hard for me. About a month ago, my girlfriend of almost 2 years told me she wanted a break to figure herself out. I was sad, but understood and tried to give her a little space. I was still completely happy with her, so I was just shocked. Yesterday, she told me she doesn't imagine ever getting back together with me. I know this is a regular thing that happens to everybody, but it's left me in such an anxious and depressed state that I've never felt before. We never got angry at each other and got along great. She was my best friend and now I'm in an extremely lonely situation. Any advice for getting over this sort of thing?",4.461188811188812,5.526205923076925,5.500286713286716,81.09812237762239,70.18881118881119,8.237482517482517,28.28601398601399,8.548686976883017,2.0781278321678323,569,20,108,9,10,188,94,143,0.124,0.7140000000000001,0.162,0.8456,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,1,8,8,0,0,6,0,6,0,0,0,3,26,21,8,0,1,5,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,9,10,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,10,2,21,4,19,10,2,23,0,3,0,0,14,10,0,2,11,79,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15387270946340895,0.13958298021284365,0.0,0.1576781790415866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708141451993147,0.0,0.0,0.1778903217288506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210806558705384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339908854328991,0.0,0.1652495169014716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16509877108365453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356241392179132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424358612149308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119083234235484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165685799962445,0.0,0.16453764219465536,0.15105451513484522,0.0,0.0,0.2518778548092099,0.1736054181696648,0.0,0.0,0.13924553865469533,0.16762413066310766,0.14105746677927086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653849627610329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34217177472598365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15782102460647102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568684333531965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428930107631116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975902103519168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087593666842667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17699695142898708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12575153493300512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20922513640471824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009285906072419,0.0,0.1069082138404649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287677615776108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15179037834435646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028042438877292
mentalhealth,Dgungho,2020/02/23,"Gaming actually HELPED my mental health Hey Red Crew, I recently uploaded a video to YouTube about mental health and gaming..and how it helped my mental health.
I made it because I was looking for positive videos about this, and couldn't find many, if any. Its had such a positive impact on me, and my experience. I'd love to know your guys thoughts on this!
Much love-DManix",5.438732394366199,6.794395971830987,5.404338028169018,81.60791549295776,68.15492957746478,9.060281690140846,28.284507042253523,9.3871,2.3360005633802823,298,10,57,6,5,93,49,71,0.0,0.835,0.165,0.9134,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,3,4,0,2,0,10,8,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,8,1,7,3,1,3,0,0,2,1,7,2,0,1,1,32,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.16735908604474856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11662575918652172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454469901243747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677597330686447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15674772931475872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16981178584726042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.546888869747476,0.0,0.0,0.2299054297666861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942518164548709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14401665621630302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3095705683115346,0.1622772772209178,0.0,0.17387390042397782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5184944468146103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607210137847966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16933538323904362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615170107296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GuerillaRebelRevolt,2020/02/23,"Told my health care provider that I have CPTSD and depression. Am I going to be fired if they are also my employer? Hi,

I go to an incredible external therapist who doesn't accept private insurance. I plan on sticking with her because she is incredible. Foolishly, I accidentally disclosed to my OBGYN and Primary Care Provider (through my husband's insurance) that I was diagnosed with C-PTSD and depression through my private therapist. I brought it up because I was worried if these are contraindications for the birth control pills that I am now taking. 

I wouldn't be so worried if my husband's plan is a health system that I actually am employed through. I accidentally told my PCP when she was taking down my general history and she probed about where I worked. She wrote my general occupation but not my employer in the notes, but now they know. I didn't think and blurted it out and now I'm worried I will lose my job or be unable to continue work with my employer if they know my history of mental health. I am high functioning and have since been going to therapy as of last year and am outperforming and doing very well. I'm just nervous now and feel I shouldn't have said anything about it and kept it between me and my private therapist.",7.075944309927365,7.508128991525425,7.634285714285718,70.35296610169496,64.16949152542372,11.65811138014528,39.31476997578693,11.35114627814755,4.767666828087167,1006,53,178,29,14,333,123,236,0.115,0.853,0.032,-0.93,5,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,3,6,12,8,0,1,4,0,25,5,0,1,0,37,44,23,0,6,9,2,2,0,0,3,5,1,0,0,10,16,0,2,5,0,0,4,5,4,1,0,11,3,40,4,23,27,0,21,0,3,0,0,16,7,0,5,9,132,50,7,0.0,0.0,0.11767769604545796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964351659341168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923466375843508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470201541404216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24589751946203076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525107854017668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20772665908718105,0.12239553294875698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06097353942472415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056009200080722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38454214650514895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274091453033164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196662063694007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254537737548333,0.09829631959475862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490850601632245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152558381203014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096236003000154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470797508689301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975265953964302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181336191160326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13790429720790331,0.42004018122316056,0.0,0.07726871122378823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23045635943251014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949874621876716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842420250744046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558079543608135,0.3673926584677378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765551227538336
mentalhealth,Kornnish,2020/02/23,"How do I appear 100% happy and fine in front of loved ones? I really don't want to burden them with my issues. Just want everyone to have a good time without knowing something's wrong with me.
My girlfriend has said she can tell something's up and I don't want her to notice. I want her to see me as a happily normal person so she'll want to hang with me more.",1.380779220779221,3.1198047402597453,3.2584415584415574,91.29337662337663,79.51948051948051,5.9584415584415575,20.090909090909093,6.868970318607317,0.26419999999999977,283,7,62,3,7,95,52,77,0.091,0.6559999999999999,0.253,0.9465,0,0,2,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,0,2,0,7,1,0,1,0,16,17,5,0,6,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,1,2,14,4,13,15,1,6,0,0,1,1,10,2,0,1,1,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923419471639415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688331391878714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21427775684820013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100952563035432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062413740613612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18167276968178284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19722220657926806,0.0,0.22917086423690086,0.0,0.0,0.13639982832106487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17575932735562375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12895201510523874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914736077387975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16040267439896974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099269222206117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17593699635943302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737426080671548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5936325271203193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19403710941915603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22007984674455347,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aimeerm,2020/02/23,"Stressing about medication after moving doctors surgeries I have just moved to a different doctors surgery after putting it off for so long as I dont like change. I spoke to a nurse regarding my repeat prescriptions (sertraline and inhalers) and she said they would all move across and that there was no need to worry. She said just to ring up when I have a weeks worth left and they would get me some ordered. Well I have done exactly that and they have told me I need an appointment with a doctor before they give me more. Thing is my work schedule is all over the place and I can't get an appointment for a few weeks.

I'm in panic mode and stressing because without my medication I wont be able to do anything I'm just gonna go back into a deep hole of depression. I wont be allowed to work (bus driver) as they obviously want me to be stable.

Fuck what do I do. I've not felt this panicked for a long time and it being the weekend and not being able to do anything is making it worse.",5.2929104477611935,5.337882432835826,5.912649253731343,82.5053917910448,67.955223880597,8.88905472636816,30.680348258706466,8.59863814320734,2.1720676616915418,783,28,161,11,12,255,116,201,0.147,0.815,0.038,-0.9713,2,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,5,2,9,7,1,3,11,0,24,6,0,2,4,30,41,13,0,5,6,0,1,1,0,5,5,4,0,0,8,11,0,0,1,1,1,5,8,5,1,0,7,6,24,2,25,24,5,27,0,1,0,1,12,9,1,1,13,117,32,5,0.2330613846313417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19178966143465487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960490938038841,0.0,0.07103602843685118,0.0,0.09915903626959384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327402105158837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036771453739116,0.0,0.0,0.12174977117632108,0.0,0.3578223042399453,0.0,0.11925135683114248,0.1365731035186561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188773907590464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773074729527818,0.12176495421596288,0.1117868584609289,0.06622707789385399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661093816518038,0.0,0.0,0.056931010072807764,0.0,0.0,0.20625199138466874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778514199636574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347848257148514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3715610522636025,0.0,0.17281206359405812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13672365949215987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174977117632108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714553177043642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22169474730446725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669710286629791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741781398875741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794998380427142,0.0,0.0,0.11135007032073327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873282153391258,0.0,0.1869477847052543,0.0,0.10477508716532984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112331428984854,0.0,0.16967146375931094,0.11834257458097795,0.11875473096523136,0.16556012078430826,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Starkicus,2020/02/23,"Question about anxiety Dear r/mental health, 

I personally don't suffer from any mental health problems which I am very greatful for. But a friend of mine does. She has anxiety problems when out in public and constantly feels like she is in other peoples way and thats theres always someone walking behind her.

This upsets her greatly and I feel powerless to help her. Is there anything I can do to help her at all?",2.81243319268636,5.613181607594938,3.815611814345997,83.34074542897329,81.0253164556962,6.042756680731365,26.499296765119553,7.3871296695380915,1.7564419127988753,333,14,57,5,9,107,59,79,0.165,0.649,0.185,0.4188,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,1,0,7,2,0,0,1,11,9,5,0,2,1,0,2,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,2,11,5,11,9,1,8,0,1,0,0,12,4,0,1,3,42,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731087356902678,0.0,0.0,0.12039278974367194,0.0,0.270869148161517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568825289041118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19131658068483606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492827779464705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903277130976505,0.12647690583910584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678011811562607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3903728896702677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37636897810520464,0.0,0.0,0.2373314116872048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649245564907253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568279332343075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273675399955612,0.1545838813685761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33880538622769185,0.0,0.0,0.19832452479335344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000481790596576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607595725507191,0.0,0.14052554977794396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ueno_stn_54,2020/02/23,"Witnessed abuse that brought back a lot of old emotions I live in Korea and when I was walking home only hours ago I witnessed a man yelling at a woman with a lot of cursing. I don't speak much Korean so I couldn't understand beyond the occasionally curse word. He was raising his hand like he would slap her. She tried to talk and he slapped her and pushed her on the ground and kicked her many times. A lot of Koreans stood by smoking and chatting, ignoring it. I froze and couldn't move. I just stood and watched him continue to hit her and yell at her. He had a friend with him that just stood and watched. He got in a car and left and she went back in the building. I walked home and completely broke down when I got inside. I grew up in an abusive household and my mom was hospitalized many times because of my dad. I've never processed it and my dad pretends like it never happened (they're divorced). I'm not asking for a solution or fix... But... I feel so worthless that I froze and didn't call for help or call the police. I needed to tell someone. I'll probably delete this tomorrow because I'm really ashamed.",2.411276190476194,4.5128651244444455,3.325460317460319,90.30400000000002,77.75555555555556,6.419047619047619,26.26984126984127,7.447530270364453,1.2918507936507937,883,35,184,12,21,281,129,225,0.135,0.807,0.057999999999999996,-0.9528,0,0,0,0,3,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,13,0,9,1,1,0,2,36,24,22,0,4,6,3,4,2,1,1,0,3,2,2,7,17,0,1,2,2,0,8,7,4,0,0,12,9,27,3,22,8,4,33,0,2,2,0,31,12,0,5,15,111,34,0,0.0,0.3153955033160445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798213880935016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442738960834825,0.0,0.0,0.20468619779090466,0.0,0.16226895007705908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718130965598482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13954929245344008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497158031961986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729765917319139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283013219616284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21289907970002744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769691723940813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892118707540038,0.0,0.26701355948002903,0.0,0.13107337794724605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14460988639447345,0.0,0.0,0.13004858850679418,0.0,0.11752676961212027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33946200560505896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698782007516746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588117356850734,0.0,0.1414606624438482,0.09784134307116156,0.0986894704600014,0.2053046644223861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396625320963789,0.0,0.0,0.10122599060358624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350068675457744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526511430254173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277234928465532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069780358446662,0.11633232790034538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552194396604565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036388036673272,0.0,0.0,0.13855829384455404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338191666959672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454803275700854,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,addiesun,2020/02/23,Youper premium plan - worth it? I was wondering if any of you subscribed to the premium plan that Youper app offers? Do you think it is worth it? How the premium functions has helped you?,2.7270000000000003,5.513166771428577,3.3310714285714305,86.76517857142859,81.28571428571428,8.071428571428571,25.892857142857146,8.841846274778883,2.406857142857143,147,6,28,4,4,46,25,35,0.0,0.871,0.129,0.5803,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,6,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,18,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43023421720063204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4240623310655214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4053864896923709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6860987186228618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,victoryohone,2020/02/23,"Tyson Fury I'm 30+ and expression about depression and mental illness have been a stigma my entire life. I've almost killed myself twice. Most recently the morning Anthony Bourdain killed himself. It really fucking hit me. A guy that seemed like he had the world at his fingertip STILL couldn't take it. Recently I've found how open Tyson Fury is at expressing his mental health issues. It's helped me a lot. Maybe it will help someone here too. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XrM6WqYEj9Y",5.150941176470589,8.59575074117647,4.245000000000001,79.76750000000001,76.88235294117645,7.6352941176470575,24.970588235294123,8.548686976883017,2.307611764705882,403,14,63,9,10,119,67,85,0.233,0.713,0.054000000000000006,-0.9585,0,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,3,0,5,0,6,4,0,1,0,10,12,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,7,1,3,6,2,7,0,1,0,1,9,4,1,4,4,35,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19169806162341627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16488574865239453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20990249662629004,0.0,0.17698186117455442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18955426938690006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20349023405252809,0.0,0.0,0.2566344588514233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19981211624088446,0.0,0.0,0.4235967987438097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521871434112712,0.09352720902990004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275421527944162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19232576162772305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3858500773144618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264044169792,0.0,0.3780449594953187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17427847239087169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622052681300394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15288307893553554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14393797006428252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_moons_child,2020/02/23,"I don’t breathe when I’m in close proximity to people and idk what to do, is it normal? Basically I can stand/sit near someone and have a casual conversation but if we were to hug I won’t breathe until the contact has stopped, I can have people near my head. If my head is close to any part of someone’s body I will stop breathing. Some days it’s not as intense but then others I stop breathing if our arms happen to be touching because we are sat next to each other. 
It’s not intentional and I don’t normally notice that I’m doing. 
There are only a couple of people that I can almost always breathe around depending on how I’m feeling. 
Do other people do this or is it just me? How do I stop?",1.4306555772994152,3.3913643356164407,3.752485322896284,86.7335616438356,80.30136986301369,6.089236790606655,23.442270058708417,7.1686216300943375,0.9309859099804304,547,19,114,7,14,189,85,146,0.10099999999999999,0.846,0.053,-0.6729,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,3,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,3,0,22,10,9,4,0,31,28,15,0,5,9,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,11,9,0,4,1,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,2,15,2,15,23,3,16,0,0,0,1,5,7,0,7,9,86,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598670603528308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961773190057232,0.0,0.0,0.10593271199661344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867326089324086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495932604001488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730315128005545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17236267703503516,0.0,0.10046233918059504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876479580501518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775179949995475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197412997014601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16566905875694152,0.0,0.30525391856126,0.0,0.17735148982898094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184743210686292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16868973442269405,0.0,0.4319805942039005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639762266024297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5209413213073324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ahktayveea,2020/02/23,"I need someone to talk to I (F15) have been depressed and scared to go to school for three years now. I lost my houe recently and I live with my uncle (and aunt, also my parents and my sister) as we are hopefully soon getting our house back. My uncle is extremely homophobic and I hear almost every night that fags are evil and all that shit. I’m out to my parents and sisters, but not anyone else for this exact reason. 
I don’t know if it has anything to do with how bad I’ve been feeling lately, it’s been worse, I want to cry every time anyone tells me something slightly mean (aka my sister everyday) and I have been having thoughts  about killing myself even though I am highly doubting the fact that I’d do it. It still scares me that my brain is only thinking about it. So yeah I’d like to rent, don’t know if it’ll help but I’m at that point where I can’t cope with it anymore. 
Thanks to anyone who’ll I hope respond",3.739771634615386,4.398452953125002,4.612708333333334,88.2973557692308,71.55208333333334,6.949358974358977,25.70673076923077,6.67199483983844,0.8770716346153846,725,21,155,5,13,235,117,192,0.17300000000000001,0.7170000000000001,0.11,-0.9366,3,0,1,0,0,1,18.0,2,0,0,1,12,13,3,3,1,1,20,2,2,2,3,35,37,17,1,6,5,6,1,1,0,2,0,1,1,0,14,13,0,0,7,0,1,1,4,9,0,1,6,2,24,4,19,29,1,16,0,2,0,0,14,5,1,6,11,101,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131960023996784,0.0,0.0,0.10538552813018813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306917258804719,0.27643383104340125,0.13502560489973905,0.10844485357290734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133175275957844,0.11003195421496363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711161139172402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475566640818496,0.0,0.0,0.11350311612248384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008643960272292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704036371416696,0.0,0.2220630056391612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663262920739277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885033599561825,0.0,0.07489439953161932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14852720151433,0.0,0.08833028634103511,0.13923427140239564,0.0,0.2617773053201851,0.0,0.1520580280948307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579658045004978,0.0,0.14484720859477127,0.0,0.14865514531572066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438172949386914,0.0,0.11636537968361732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14385495180902505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354856423992224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977142291816117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366790523784442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022568364051954,0.0,0.0,0.2926552715240153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457600688271606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549321471190215,0.13011822212596574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638723170678157,0.13336979982213146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527170072180186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165794214911444,0.10145175050543337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524078644398327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592088764080533,0.1151827413471825,0.1213265964038136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444019213718268,0.12947454432189862,0.10461970170776902,0.07684278692411467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07772807680186135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13429649246241904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486289305451729
mentalhealth,themix669108,2020/02/23,"Does anyone else get heavy criticism while have anxiety attacks? ""You're overreacting"" ""fine, just have it your way then if you're going to make it such a problem"" "" you're ruining this by blowing it out of proportion"" ""you're not thinking right, so I'll make decisions for you"" or is it just me? If you also experience this, I'm sending you a big hug. You aren't alone, and youre feelings are valid.",3.8144725738396623,5.248179329113924,5.079177215189876,82.09868143459916,72.16455696202532,8.810970464135021,29.62236286919831,9.2995712137729,2.5676059071729944,313,13,63,7,6,104,57,79,0.158,0.7809999999999999,0.061,-0.7731,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,6,0,0,5,5,1,0,2,0,5,1,0,2,0,14,12,8,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,1,7,2,5,12,0,8,0,1,0,1,7,3,0,3,2,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886946324362889,0.0,0.22291140909300897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21323833295195985,0.0,0.0,0.1949042273392627,0.2856060825984969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171114454775222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439306795054356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23285477436295116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726650368262825,0.0,0.0,0.1409412993579444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14563219149360626,0.0,0.15841659124338306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37212745711645934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26672028263350994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380457814202263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17860784632716545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22125394623339148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tlennon3,2020/02/23,"Bettering Self New to this, but I figured I need to start somewhere. I struggle with situational panic attacks. My panic attacks most often happen at night or when I travel. So to me, I have a type of agoraphobia. I have worked into becoming a functional part of society that helps people and will continue to do so, but I want to help myself. Last week I had my first panic true panic attack in a long time. One where I blacked out for a period, broke things, and thought I was dying as a screamed in my apartment for help like someone was there trying to hurt me. I have done therapy but haven't felt I have had any success with it. Today, I am starting a movement for myself to better myself every day. To improve the areas I struggle with. I am writing down all the areas I want to improve in my life and giving myself a baseline. From there, I will be writing down, daily, what I have done to improve from that baseline to better myself. I hope I can help inspire someone to improve their wellbeing because I know what hell feels like. We all deserve to be happy, but it requires work.

Have a fantastic day!",4.356249999999998,5.771943421296296,5.572222222222227,79.15750000000003,70.80555555555556,7.437037037037038,30.62962962962963,7.865858978985527,2.242801851851852,873,37,155,11,16,291,118,216,0.188,0.536,0.276,0.9755,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,1,8,7,23,4,6,10,0,21,1,0,0,3,32,33,12,1,4,5,0,2,2,0,2,1,1,0,1,8,9,0,1,6,1,0,2,1,13,0,2,8,4,34,10,32,21,4,29,1,2,1,0,10,12,1,4,17,126,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071178107187852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3548858944182464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338687027940275,0.11484068911231066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758926636997887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341204392904459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791759433845499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128207461040164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760988390623016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05257676209888315,0.07428523996648667,0.099839669513123,0.0,0.0,0.08844760567496343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974965172080147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195153135331327,0.11069148538010193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787895663924108,0.0,0.0,0.10327825322536607,0.0,0.0,0.11131559846877476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571461558515963,0.08475975413744471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344603469857261,0.10160136003573,0.0,0.0,0.092021390486312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710183197734821,0.0,0.1004271102939207,0.0,0.09758069147654133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046134803971085,0.0,0.0,0.4880050340122269,0.0,0.1126030981813456,0.0,0.07208849048824205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084766022105848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168808773767818,0.0,0.0,0.1762083570964212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719893753203206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174105267285349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891324491117833,0.0,0.06908146528747325,0.0,0.0,0.08255062471608447,0.06063313087270611,0.0,0.09856341244289778,0.0,0.0,0.0705974070828642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266334530175707,0.0,0.08340862544608599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15140124384893835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wutheringstorms,2020/02/23,"Feels like im drifting in and out of dimensions I've been experiencing a weird phase where I feel like I'm not.... living in reality. It feels like time just passes without me knowing and my brain alternates between knowing that I'm living in a certain sort of reality and being just very disoriented and disconnected from reality. It's ... a weird headspace to be in. I feel like my thoughts are convoluted (as you can tell by the writing of this post) and my attention span has been absolutely horrible, it's hard for me to sit through more than 10mins of studying. My sleep cycle has also become whack and on most days I sleep at earliest 4 am and wake up by like 8 am to go for class, and end up crashing during the weekends when my body can't take it anymore. Is this normal? I've tried explaining my situation to my friends but they don't quite get what I mean.

My objective of this post isn't for anyone to diagnose me per se, but it would be great if there's anyone that knows of a better way to phrase my experience, so I can describe it to my therapist/counsellor better. I'm going for my first therapy session in a week's time because a while back I got a referral by a mental health service who told me I have symptoms of depression and anxiety (I've had it since 2014 but in the recent month after I was given the referral it's actually gotten a lot better, best that I've ever been for years). 

Also, this is my first time posting in this subreddit so.... I'm kinda nervous, I really appreciate any help! :0",8.07598302687412,6.157476468646866,9.012430457331448,68.99621287128714,63.19141914191419,12.485525695426686,38.14450730787365,11.35114627814755,4.221375483262611,1202,50,233,29,14,415,170,303,0.057999999999999996,0.8,0.142,0.9809,0,0,0,0,0,1,34.0,0,1,1,7,11,16,0,1,13,0,22,8,5,0,2,38,44,20,0,3,8,0,5,5,1,1,3,0,0,0,18,10,0,0,11,1,0,4,5,4,0,2,10,6,27,12,41,30,4,40,0,1,0,0,9,14,0,5,22,153,45,3,0.0,0.0,0.10025346370591874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16431252026238807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986257269984686,0.0,0.078591149834927,0.0,0.10188442017547812,0.14366785860900144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07899602523205483,0.0,0.0626256299301682,0.11346151759144445,0.0,0.0,0.10781288648362752,0.2725793493376767,0.0,0.11411419961361585,0.0,0.11468500493622788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662548644541959,0.0,0.08848455475158096,0.10427274269122982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099173950321153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292869125613946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049346413146072,0.0,0.0,0.20778138006293587,0.29357246552219385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17477080022389446,0.0,0.0,0.0793719538029796,0.0,0.053674220877731715,0.0,0.11677208207730623,0.0,0.08216568216800374,0.11326448387276387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202939251319622,0.0,0.0,0.10920132821419228,0.0,0.0,0.06886036546813272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109702377380928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16937958882582838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509529633642041,0.0,0.18143182604242009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734068523595966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190733105769006,0.0,0.0,0.1035316046749727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200121626422506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065740636414992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951720245043565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927014498148233,0.0,0.0,0.06581396492340262,0.0,0.1014373291519059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498254103193299,0.11547720435236915,0.2056161799256204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067798548517976,0.07724310498073764,0.0,0.08979395395782483,0.0,0.11748516430575025,0.11928197236576507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155923854870617,0.17971488411419928,0.0,0.0,0.09816664092930748,0.0,0.06974957227754999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476622400029223,0.0,0.08154538538769578,0.08240693517673088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903181041978124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297921268676455,0.0,0.0,0.0661572612575394
mentalhealth,Swimming-Act,2020/02/23,"nightmares constantly for the past month i can’t really remember my dreams, i often forget them 5-10 minutes after i wake up. i just woke up from one and i can’t remember most of it, but in my dream i was at my grandmas. i like to take walks so late at night i took one. i ended up in these woods and was being trapped. there was this guy who’s been reoccurring in my dreams lately but i can never remember his face. i can’t remember anything between then and this- i woke up back at my grandmas and knew something was wrong. i felt like o was going to be killed. this man ended up in my grandmas kitchen. but it felt as if he had been there many times before and was almost meant to be there, like it was a routine for him to be in the house. he has this weird weapon left where i was sleeping and didn’t know i was awake. my wallets and everything were out empty on the couch. i grabbed the weapon and at some point he came up to me and i confronted him. although i can’t remember most of it now, the last moments was him a few inches from me, and me repeatedly stabbing him in the face crying while his blood was splattering all over me. i think he was screaming at me me to kill him in those moments but i can’t remember. i’m just so terrified to go to sleep every night and ache for a good dream for once. i was diagnosed with ptsd and recently have been severely dissociative. i wonder if my brain is trying to uncover something from my past because i can’t remember any of my severe trauma as a kid , as i’ve only been told a few things. i’ve never been able to remember anything that has happened more than a few months ago. but most of the nightmares i’ve had are me being hunted in some way, kidnapped or almost getting murdered. for now i’m just trying to find a way to stop these. does anyone know",3.1440527119938864,4.324395013368989,4.416611917494271,87.18819518716579,73.46524064171123,7.588846447669977,25.923987776928954,8.07648339933343,1.4255067990832693,1421,47,303,21,28,469,176,374,0.183,0.7559999999999999,0.061,-0.9947,0,1,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,0,13,14,6,0,14,0,39,9,7,0,3,56,59,28,3,2,11,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,2,3,14,15,1,1,17,4,0,5,9,10,0,2,31,4,48,4,53,23,10,60,0,0,0,0,17,26,0,12,30,218,62,0,0.07605875237245384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742149485566384,0.0,0.15232370767399014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05172255977902141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05318204811289723,0.0,0.12517974515365946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058484485747817234,0.0,0.04636470949443144,0.0,0.06472039627714443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490672178730707,0.0,0.08699095043125972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219249094781875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354696803727231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719803263388086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06655952675202177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473095833650334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408277926088354,0.0,0.06835670233569724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605665976539542,0.0,0.06951632174794396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03973755890537027,0.0,0.08645188349580353,0.06379447290694973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531012278874287,0.06725850353507383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776158839424301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16829548091687227,0.0,0.08359980239137092,0.06199803461000102,0.17159517112438696,0.0,0.08263805699757702,0.0,0.0,0.11147539359960676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07711163701243577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214187410017364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732239740597675,0.0,0.0,0.14275197348072033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100008898751883,0.1030787580471153,0.05784610851789624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145213370733453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190010535333899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890861134859279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04872518436545599,0.0,0.07509884217154265,0.0,0.6892779173626058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17184948183547238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15222736218759708,0.0,0.0,0.1171074869415061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358852266885767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718671615556159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0505300554418464,0.04873537740245199,0.0,0.0,0.04435047015666207,0.0,0.0,0.07267739731810602,0.0845040724502326,0.103277800466534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207437947794808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248247249876997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315830581630068,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Snezzy_Anus,2020/02/23,"I feel depressed all the time an I don’t know why I haven’t been diagnosed and I’m not saying I am. 

I have a really good life, a great dad, a sub-par mother and a fun brother. I am an introvert so I only have 5 friends that I’ve meet (but I have others online). My grades are decent and school is easy but extremely boring so I skip a lot. I’ve never had a girlfriend, I’m happy with everything that I’ve got. But I feel extremely suicidal all the time. I’m not bullied. Sometimes I hear/see/feel things that aren’t there I think. Sometimes I hear the radio talking about me in the other room, it’s so clear, but when I enter, silence, I’ve heard other things but I have terrible memory, I see things in corners at night (I know I know) but it’s so clear and sometimes I see other things that people are confused about when it is so clear. I have smelt a room smell a certain way but only to me. 

I just don’t know what to do, I’ve been to councillors but I just end up Lying to them about everything, and my mum is too lazy to take me to a doctor and licences therapist. 

I am a 15 year old boy and I know that fact will make a lot of you not believe me but why would I lie on the internet while being able to remain anonymous. It makes me able to feel more open to people.

If anyone can help me with myself, that would be amazing, thank you.",0.4045180023228809,2.392738818815332,2.613473867595822,93.36455458768877,84.15679442508711,5.638513356562138,19.322764227642274,6.88968998030894,0.18886722415795545,1039,28,235,13,30,352,137,287,0.094,0.737,0.16899999999999998,0.9669,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,1,0,14,12,0,1,18,0,27,3,0,2,8,49,48,25,1,3,15,4,3,0,2,3,3,3,2,1,19,10,0,0,9,1,0,1,8,4,0,0,5,9,37,8,20,38,5,21,0,1,2,0,16,9,0,4,10,159,56,3,0.22035188649025375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703758123526967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241305592743144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489437847463668,0.111826263208418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11276974646583918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758318376268972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980380672057778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22283306928571367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512166044794105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241035393179063,0.08811776657708663,0.1214693663830003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728434029777755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483525907618232,0.0,0.07384861234799893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30274908528841904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778205270037712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18733529403598387,0.0,0.0,0.14708659529268486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497447956209549,0.0,0.0,0.10339265921247116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156111188472366,0.0,0.0,0.1675875391121294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527642532023685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058153045909117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761633220708402,0.0,0.11150393657695218,0.2633878867167224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269004751830137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051459963097415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283859775501945,0.08855524978987768,0.0,0.10143520593530496,0.0,0.12792276191767607,0.2927840043061371,0.07059629572187208,0.0,0.0,0.12848895703539787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745253547994884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19883330401399266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565316579581954,0.0,0.0,0.07094969518967029
mentalhealth,PersonArab,2020/02/23,"Relapsing after cutting Cipralex cold turkey So I’ve been on the pill for almost a year now. Went from 10mg to 20mg and stayed on the 20mg

Months after deciding to cut cold turkey because of how much I felt like I’ve been “cured” of my anxiety and depression. I’ve been relapsing very badly.

I’ve been shaking, breathing heavily and feeling fatigued for the past couple of months. Even coffee makes me feel extremely anxious and video games elevate my heart rate in the worst way possible.

My heart beats badly in classes and I can’t concentrate. I also feel like im always out of breath.

I’m coming back on the meds today but can’t see any psychiatrist for a week. Hopefully coming back would just stabilize me till I manage to have enough money to head back to professional help (therapy and so on)

The problem is, therapy in kuwait is expensive.",4.4356801125703536,6.269585579268298,5.519024390243904,77.96331144465294,71.25609756097559,9.19249530956848,29.07879924953096,9.661875296680813,2.942828893058161,681,27,122,17,13,225,101,164,0.134,0.794,0.07200000000000001,-0.7379,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,10,12,2,1,8,0,10,7,5,2,0,22,21,12,0,3,2,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,9,0,0,5,2,2,4,2,9,0,0,6,7,9,3,24,14,3,27,0,2,1,0,2,8,0,2,15,71,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374966431280334,0.0,0.0,0.10980716669564217,0.11425334555219654,0.0,0.0,0.09337585661747684,0.0,0.10504216570891994,0.15512179447627833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167499237586094,0.2292970838159847,0.08370321353698686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23656169526315746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151931469644074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11826534262977426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418784641262502,0.0,0.09069229805257316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082849614903391,0.0980946570820302,0.13183962451344858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092019921364654,0.0,0.0,0.3254272352683283,0.09203634169334718,0.0,0.0,0.1363803204882144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14831891537057845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13416596050937132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165583287520927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252102419587074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21919988103626686,0.0,0.10093902533962157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310784205429745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15479697079651067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313876156245838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941870027074717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635473585799474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.314053073997903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015430991113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329555257379692,0.0,0.10899069300657263,0.11014221014172583,0.0,0.0,0.12728822011473687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754144796775584,0.0,0.0,0.08842346771181094
mentalhealth,throwaway19847uaua,2020/02/23,Can't Sleep. Pissed off. Do normal people know how much fucking energy it takes just to exist?,1.1950000000000005,3.767361833333332,2.483333333333338,87.94500000000002,97.33333333333334,4.622222222222223,11.555555555555555,6.42735559955562,-0.4379111111111116,75,1,13,1,3,24,18,18,0.0,0.723,0.27699999999999997,0.6967,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,2,3,2,1,0,4,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4262299522667757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533790349215304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3389221404884409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4517275663328949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196315111080295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4613793456014782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34664950239938164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moondustroses,2020/02/23,"I’m new here but I’m going to talk about self harm and depression so idk trigger warning Hey Guys,
My first language isn’t English so sorry if there are mistakes.

I have depression and anxiety and some trauma from bullying.
The thing is I don’t talk about my mental health with family or friends because I know what they think about it.
It’s either “nothing serious” or they talk about ppl like they’re a little crazy.

Ok so my problem is and I hope it makes sense,
That because of that no one knows what’s going on in my life.
Some days I lay in bed awake and don’t move until it gets dark again.
I don’t drink or eat.
But I managed to keep the illusion up I go to uni I meet my family etc.

Now my Problem:
I know my family thinks I’m lazy.
It’s not an over thinker thought I know it and heard it.
And I know it seems like not a big deal but I can’t handle that at all.

My therapist would say I should just tell them what’s going on but I really don’t want to do that because of the reasons I mentioned.

Also it’s a Little endless because everything started in 5th grade I’m now 22 and so much has happened and everything’s messed up since then because of so so many reasons and I feel Broken and don’t really think it’ll get better but of course you hope that or daydream about a better future.

Does anyone have any tips on this? Sometimes I feel so lost because I’ve got two close friends and I managed to “hide” this from them and it’s hard to think that they don’t know my struggle. I know everyone’s struggling not just me.

But having to handle all these issues alone and forcing myself out of bed getting no sleep being
Anxious all the time then the trauma and then hearing stuff like “I wish I had your life” in a annoyed voice just breaks me.
I vor bullied everyday in school I never talked about it I just went into my room sometimes self harmed but mostly cried a bit.
Sometimes I self harm but it’s gotten so much better it used to be really bad.

Anyways does anyone have a thought on how to handle this ? I can’t just not care about what ppl think and it’s not an option to tell
People about all of the shitty things in life ... but it’s so hard to have this in the back
Of
Your mind all the time..

Thanks",1.22957538517975,3.3276823922413783,2.6541782831988283,93.61716067498163,81.75862068965517,5.414453411592077,20.863719735876746,6.56484139541529,0.23921135363169466,1746,51,379,17,47,566,207,464,0.23399999999999999,0.6709999999999999,0.095,-0.9973,0,1,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,3,5,5,31,30,1,2,17,1,25,7,1,6,6,90,70,45,0,10,25,0,4,3,2,3,4,4,3,4,34,20,2,1,20,1,0,6,17,17,0,3,8,8,48,13,47,57,13,46,0,3,0,0,27,22,0,12,20,249,82,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426460803567987,0.0,0.05734234919184631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048761762436582624,0.0,0.05485402025392317,0.08100607978329324,0.0,0.10027540814110364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551366098747776,0.059870561478434274,0.2622636960894136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19025136011848,0.07828313375288387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310788180752317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876441972585048,0.04624370154050403,0.0739245602487157,0.1235185785854358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549880923294307,0.0,0.0,0.07024346270593627,0.0,0.07337197107039044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996987121005675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851706484898305,0.12888740597844112,0.0,0.2027908762103039,0.0,0.07251226158606934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060992115749751524,0.0,0.0,0.11079799113887442,0.0,0.1123884866931484,0.0,0.1630060934040356,0.0,0.05734892546155451,0.0,0.0,0.07099908303424705,0.06340836929241735,0.0,0.12846693734544726,0.0,0.0,0.07621891119036049,0.08081658653549732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243820682500982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484124244798249,0.0,0.0637345726024447,0.0,0.0,0.2758498037373514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519417857219726,0.10509411528455123,0.1437342109059716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782743231064796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04786354964214134,0.07269747168664834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226163189736458,0.0,0.07240146601904852,0.0,0.0,0.07621091643669824,0.1054226424792893,0.0,0.05530320710384624,0.06925299886544843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880274532829024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048589067648872206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049711120188393264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722373067891872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780790480157518,0.1474490733023161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057022581258493216,0.0,0.07256914463245527,0.0,0.06527740985408982,0.2244114160358974,0.0,0.0,0.05931499967600441,0.0,0.07175664258548488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21275381472834914,0.08026771818547583,0.0507530676929082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14992297315737066,0.08208490739562088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305345955397656,0.12534641316300935,0.06601619957392214,0.0,0.08325486701521369,0.09527504322638074,0.2297278890786293,0.0,0.11385129579201138,0.08362335889675178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004522733257272,0.0,0.0,0.061929974987511724,0.0,0.0,0.042293383171898964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664711219264845,0.0,0.0,0.08245704818095341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05093707394844694,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lucicrooknoise,2020/02/23,"Lamictal? I am wondering if anyone else has had bad side effects with lamictal (lamotrigine).

A bit of back information:
New Year’s Day 2019 I admitted myself to the hospitals mental health ward... one of the worst experiences I’ve ever had but that is besides the point. At this point I was already on Wellbutrin cal and trying to get tested for adhd. I was also going to weekly dbt group sessions. After this they put me on lamictal. Started off with a small dose and increased as people do. Within the next few months I met my boyfriend, and have had a great relationship since. However, slowly my vision has worsened. I’ve always had a bit of a lazy eye, but I noticed it was getting worse so I had my prescription updated. As soon as I had a better prescription that caused less strain, I had full out double vision and a very visible lazy eye so I went back and had my prescription altered to correct this further. I only now realized it’s a side effect of lamictal, but I’m not entirely sure. I’m having a bit of a freak out because they are considering putting me in for surgery because it’s effecting my driving ability.

Since starting lamictal, I have slowly lost my desire and energy to go to the gym where I was extremely into body building before, lost 60 lbs, and actually started loving myself. Now I feel I have no self control, and have gained weight worsening my depression. My irritability has gotten worse, I’ve had a few meltdowns, my anxiety has gotten worse, and my coordination has gotten worse.

I received my adhd diagnosis and have been put on a small dose of methylphenidate (Ritalin) to avoid stimulants effecting the lamictal. I’m at the point where I am going to decrease my dosage of lamictal, and talk to my doctor about completely abandoning that to work on my adhd which I believe is my biggest problem besides depression and anxiety, as I have a concern that I was misdiagnosed as bipolar due to the symptoms being similar to adhd. 

Sorry for this being so long, I think I’ve needed to vent to someone that may understand these problems more on my level. Any input would be extremely helpful, and like I have stated I am going to go back to my doctor but I would like to go in with a little bit more understanding that could come from others experiences.",6.562136752136753,7.364117599067602,7.5777622377622365,69.0336519036519,65.31701631701631,10.737839937839935,35.23620823620824,10.66633372479733,4.108941569541571,1826,83,302,47,27,617,211,429,0.177,0.72,0.10300000000000001,-0.988,1,1,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,2,10,14,18,0,2,22,0,42,13,3,7,3,54,72,27,0,8,6,0,2,2,0,3,8,0,0,1,16,20,1,3,12,1,0,14,2,12,0,1,22,4,47,6,52,43,13,63,0,5,2,1,12,28,0,3,22,221,63,5,0.0,0.0,0.07378390144292626,0.0,0.3634713893191493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343689130274128,0.06046483758627042,0.06291310658847701,0.0,0.0,0.05141700833155801,0.0,0.1156820211362764,0.0,0.0,0.05286787472609291,0.07747080092595696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744169645011699,0.06313071973875628,0.0921816191832164,0.0,0.06433806000362327,0.08518594109740589,0.0,0.06687040062743403,0.33018367993793063,0.08398503698812712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767171698034663,0.0,0.06513083304874706,0.07927505371866549,0.0,0.08480241017977554,0.060367981185912724,0.0,0.0,0.04876183034775507,0.0,0.13024459057420915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15477892045550734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316198067353679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839306237813625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14792107083470654,0.0,0.0,0.03823040197695873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900561789835908,0.0,0.25782350484819994,0.0,0.0,0.0833596686451297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036929339446773,0.0,0.0,0.05067941027881544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387790119647135,0.0757805168475387,0.0,0.0669119703901493,0.0,0.0,0.16507325913607745,0.0,0.06824046677639486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619652661552084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060350729395122774,0.0,0.0,0.05606343776191893,0.0,0.07302406315360595,0.0804114915386982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08608184250434807,0.0,0.0,0.05123490971791435,0.05750438215587389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05241806188244147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21442606466812852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469603539826273,0.0,0.2280250959189833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117623679135261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887713016266938,0.0,0.0,0.12508981136577718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406362863146693,0.0,0.0,0.0846385718741261,0.16055024105079962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126099737275117,0.07858715295449557,0.0,0.06077199955085959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04844747275945645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051333843005258485,0.0,0.0,0.15742417599657105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06238570206085886,0.0,0.0,0.0606493277990809,0.09207192212412263,0.0,0.07009070343482827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199520661382471,0.05504456894160298,0.0,0.3082098936815933,0.10742154609356784,0.0,0.0,0.04868999697286297
mentalhealth,AreDemHogsDumb,2020/02/23,"ADHD Job Search: How ANYONE can find a Fulfilling, High-Income Job Hi everyone,

as this sub is about mental health I though it might be fitting to briefly talk about ADHD-related struggles (something that I got diagnosed with about 4 years ago). As you know if you have ADHD (or almost any other mental illness for that matter), it can make life a lot more complicated - something that ""normal"" people just have a hard time wrapping their heads around. Things like finding a job can thus be quite hard, because we have a very specific way of working, one of which is not supported in most of the types of jobs offered (its getting better, but just bear with me..). 

I've read a few books and a few articles on this and have come up with the following list of criteria, we should be regarding when looking for a job:

 1. Interest-fueled 

2. Creative 

3. Risk-taking 

4. Constant Adaptation

 5. Intense 

6. Structured 

If you're interested in the explanation of these crtieria - I created a youtube video which tries to capture everything in a bit more detail:  [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9CEw-AaFgI](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x9CEw-AaFgI) 

I hope this is able to help you in some way or another. 

I wish everyone a good and happy sunday - you're not alone!",6.9851198630137015,8.96674884474886,6.020271118721464,76.27917380136991,65.1187214611872,9.12796803652968,31.95234018264841,9.516144504307137,3.10085593607306,1003,40,164,20,16,302,146,219,0.033,0.7959999999999999,0.17,0.9868,6,1,2,0,0,0,60.0,2,3,1,3,9,8,0,1,14,0,15,5,1,3,0,35,25,13,0,6,9,0,2,1,0,2,4,0,0,0,14,10,0,0,3,3,0,2,2,1,0,1,1,3,12,7,26,19,8,18,0,0,1,0,10,8,0,10,7,104,26,9,0.10352311506082194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732440001388632,0.0,0.09176699527408146,0.0,0.10366344585042493,0.10721872626505076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039926820023812,0.10855301248795453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238576908284364,0.0,0.0,0.09215752057907244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310673007426243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155778255458548,0.11302042939468902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891759970618411,0.0,0.1118717101203496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507378264228162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19784154565249606,0.09303990060767332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892365033724611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408655486027554,0.0,0.0,0.08683027729209092,0.08279689213067724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102022809867475,0.1854727541648545,0.0,0.10624458247182143,0.11004023035054937,0.0,0.0,0.06938936185165878,0.10937785487518073,0.0,0.10282181183746417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5136535890958149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05689359667407765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312143770969291,0.05057616486419449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869333436883189,0.0,0.0,0.08801165040308312,0.0,0.0,0.06910248317326137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086539021695777,0.1098216654573142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10143067272107027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014994196448894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717698932073759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010957577929477,0.10355112988598474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939430331123788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082248371396492,0.0,0.0,0.1174768041666042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320795849998602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687761576461317,0.0,0.10171093493169324,0.0,0.06036516090280367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702853996905542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541741174285605,0.0,0.16434366026182018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904647329842745,0.0,0.0,0.07536606071862806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666654919605179
mentalhealth,ilovelifeitsgreatlol,2020/02/23,Is everyone secretly depressed? It seems to me that everyone is depressed it’s just that some people are much better at hiding it or ignoring it. I’ve met people that I would have never expected to be depressed but when I got closer to them it turns out that they are in fact depressed they just don’t show it or talk about it. Pretty much everyone I know is depressed in some way which makes me sad. It makes me feel that depression is unbearable and is maybe just part of the human condition. What do you guys think? Do you guys know people who are truly not depressed?,4.74642857142857,6.025212214285716,5.252142857142856,82.34285714285716,69.71428571428571,8.814285714285715,27.392857142857146,9.188382445141503,2.2176750000000003,456,15,87,9,8,146,66,112,0.242,0.6829999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.9716,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,3,1,5,10,0,0,1,0,14,0,0,2,2,24,24,5,0,2,7,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,16,2,0,1,6,1,0,0,3,9,0,0,2,1,11,1,9,20,5,8,0,8,0,0,12,5,0,5,2,66,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075212423438919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7329731868658558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34850399685755845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06147084924421092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723285618888948,0.0,0.0,0.24075232708030025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13362643841143956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16230154624828955,0.0,0.12213619566346046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17873995986399416,0.0,0.0937644208646502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165147103806935,0.0,0.25284976979247603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368322109493078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067529083837636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771559359777683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789892703860275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223627160520232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964988121690176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636181316478879,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TitanIsElite,2020/02/23,"Dont know where else to go i have tried mental health chat lines and all that but they never seem to help me. So i thought i might as well post something here.  


Im currently living with my dad it is just me and him. But he gets angry really easily, and i mean really angry. I suffer from depression, social anxiety and am currently not working because of that. Trying to find work has been a real stress on me but for the nearly 3 years i have been trying, going to disability job providers hasnt helped in the slightest. A few minutes ago my dad out of the blue calls me an idiot and then yells at me that he wants to watch the tv. I get upset and automatically i get angry back at him which then just escalates things. He threatens to kick me out the house and says that he wouldnt care if i was homeless.  


I dont have and family near by and i couldnt burden them with my problems nor do i have any friends. I just dont know what to do.",1.973175270108044,3.6523943367346985,3.7166746698679463,88.95101440576235,77.57142857142857,6.856662665066028,20.71308523409364,7.724431198458867,0.643738055222089,734,18,161,11,17,246,119,196,0.22899999999999998,0.7090000000000001,0.061,-0.9906,3,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,2,8,10,1,2,8,0,19,1,0,0,2,35,31,18,0,5,8,2,0,0,1,2,1,2,0,0,8,13,0,0,6,2,0,2,9,7,1,0,4,4,26,3,23,24,2,20,0,2,2,0,17,9,0,3,8,112,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935802760207262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156579412797868,0.0,0.10300595537733218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035366077113103,0.0,0.08208065228226744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137491468662984,0.0,0.13728341471304326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159728050482584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4734221352615571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248178582803188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693489525564716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306655418644473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402932071631243,0.0,0.2110453051873143,0.0,0.1530480200510779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312536672135004,0.0,0.0,0.18050449058387552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15536662472979598,0.0,0.0,0.14544379845148947,0.0,0.1336181468775145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14799890662048745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11889734796225082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14667200535348254,0.0,0.0,0.13569431002973364,0.14284108723195746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384944725641557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12895631992743106,0.0,0.0,0.12884070678495824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15325980076268453,0.17251892479864273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707812177526886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225792008580684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13725748411974953,0.0,0.10365921646128726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423973338124722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945467265408022,0.0,0.0,0.10689609840551867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27425306836838176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941934464592794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106543238276392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960518447541276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670940577016613
mentalhealth,anaktb,2020/02/23,"Mental Health on Instagram Survey Hi everyone! Could you take a few minutes to complete my survey. It is for one of my classes (at the University of Gothenburg) where we try to see how Instagram is used to get mental health support. Our focus group is narrow, so it is difficult to find enough respondents in order to get good data. You would help a lot! Please, take the survey if you feel comfortable with it and thank you https://app.easyquest.com/q/p6SZs

All the data collected are anonymous and are available only to the researchers involved into the study. It will be used to create the final report of the study.",6.811272727272726,8.720536081818182,6.2925,74.43875,65.45454545454545,8.772727272727273,30.113636363636363,9.188382445141503,2.8405454545454547,499,18,77,9,8,154,73,110,0.023,0.821,0.157,0.9362,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,2,4,0,0,3,5,0,0,9,0,10,2,0,3,1,15,20,5,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,8,4,16,16,4,8,0,0,1,0,11,6,0,2,1,58,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19543632199861088,0.0,0.0,0.14882482768571414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19260050398133607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17811270352432004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424918433257436,0.0,0.0,0.20419153343254656,0.17036575967901565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19477208346119865,0.0,0.0,0.156343051053853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3962678892248739,0.0,0.0,0.12493965101682708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584701832290064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3756936946054797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126309120505111,0.14176521389982266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20461066858305044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485362626873091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21152393570826292,0.0,0.0,0.28029844204691795,0.0,0.0,0.17161160958118388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655302015443054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32197862820105755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241285175558354,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scorpionelite,2020/02/23,"This is the first time i ever stopped myself from putting a knife to my body I started crying and just as i was about to do the action i threw the knife across the room. I know it doesn’t seem like much but i feel a tad better now.
And hopefully a step in the right direction",3.188389830508473,3.719512881355936,3.9625000000000017,92.92476694915257,72.72881355932203,7.255932203389831,23.224576271186447,7.1686216300943375,0.5196745762711856,216,5,51,2,4,69,45,59,0.062,0.777,0.162,0.7684,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,8,0,4,1,1,0,1,10,10,4,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,3,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,2,1,8,3,7,8,1,14,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,7,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26431495831942,0.0,0.33196304108674185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32828066465217226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703334997577125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15111120929831742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542078309795415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2968326902624998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16424413320173387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600656039333235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21969447158341102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30043408921386305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552224653997115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720684233853344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21153270541897204,0.0,0.0,0.2498580496262837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17426607048349207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idkwhattodoahhom,2020/02/23,I need help asap. I have almost 70 almost healed cuts on my things and I have a doctor's appointment Tuesday. I don't know what to do. If my mom sees them I'm gonna get beat. So how do I hide them.,-2.135579710144928,-0.3587644130434757,0.9956521739130472,101.5794202898551,95.30434782608695,3.936231884057971,12.014492753623188,5.46131890053228,-1.452046376811594,151,2,40,1,6,53,35,46,0.098,0.8340000000000001,0.068,-0.0478,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,5,2,0,1,0,7,11,4,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,9,0,2,10,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,3,1,23,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6646005277409098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3396629705977833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733781498817476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224323440528788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18237631435302845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886592057481391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460628844818868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644418230521753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22046667604298906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moonchild_purple,2020/02/23,"I feel my depression getting worse as the evening approaches and it gets really bad during the night. Same goes for my anxiety. I can already feel it getting worse and the weird pain in my chest growing. I also feel nauseated when my anxiety gets bad during the night. 


I just want to go numb. I can't take this anymore and I wish I was normal or atleast had the means to cure myself.",2.098026315789472,4.526783013157896,3.4860526315789464,86.98986842105263,80.71052631578947,6.957894736842108,25.28947368421053,8.07648339933343,1.7073473684210527,303,12,60,6,8,99,50,76,0.318,0.618,0.064,-0.9705,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,5,0,4,3,1,0,0,13,16,7,0,3,2,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,6,0,0,2,3,12,0,5,14,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,38,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20234946923586655,0.14663810698101504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28054970902647663,0.0,0.18185027509203527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062067014281458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793327964430107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111182998691387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27814680393505736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3832056683506713,0.0,0.10421139567882026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19973985131982328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441540378482077,0.1796602169973094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951148619183718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746926179297132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378687719429246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815430015608493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21086240139977844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3737322150068184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theturdbird69,2020/02/23,"I need help. This is the hardest thing ive ever done. But i need ATLEAST one person to understand. So to start, im to afraid to talk to anyone i know. Either the people i know dont care, tell me i have to push through it, or they care more than anything and i dont want them to worry about me. But i am 22 years old and have had to many jobs. They emotionally and mentally destroy me to where i feel crippled and sick. I try so hard, all i want to do is be normal and work like everyone else. I always tell myself next time is gonna be better, but it never is. I fail time and time again no matter how hard i try to push through it like everyone tells me to do. I want to do this but it just seems impossible. But now, i dont even want to apply anywhere or try. The thought of trying seriously makes me think i should kill myself, because i feel as if im just lazy, but i dont want to be whatever is wrong with me. I have recently started pulling my hair out im not sure why i think its something to do with being nervous. Maybe this is just a vent, or a final cry out for help. But i need to figure something out. The suicidal thoughts is getting worse and worse everyday. I want to do it already, but i dont want to hurt the people who care. Does anyone else experience this? What is wrong with me?",1.6633636791712445,3.0542969530685937,3.462913200439491,91.685959817925,77.66425992779783,6.550243289907392,22.873803170616856,7.255503002510835,0.6310522366975357,1004,30,233,12,23,337,135,277,0.242,0.688,0.07,-0.9931,1,0,2,0,0,1,30.0,0,0,3,3,14,16,2,2,7,0,30,2,1,2,4,60,58,23,2,13,17,0,5,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,13,13,0,0,11,0,0,3,8,9,0,1,4,5,37,7,32,48,3,22,0,2,0,0,11,4,0,5,17,155,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644496144569867,0.0,0.06518125242390649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095477389211642,0.08026378133999007,0.0644632847309681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047752477302767216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928121498585889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396042049929192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604765862695693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855175682467247,0.08016421857629052,0.4590419938623607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130878197854873,0.08811667901464751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05173973281656158,0.0708587717989082,0.0,0.14970548952857668,0.0,0.0766269635988497,0.0,0.0,0.0792173719167119,0.0,0.0,0.08581250204294437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04092696579763912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034610053660682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501301281101327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385956848624207,0.0,0.2538467284774534,0.0,0.07773570687601347,0.0,0.08666641310031774,0.0,0.08610207439538102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654135024573093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228942706131152,0.07941970814370826,0.07869834690201405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894356684113958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742539171884218,0.06041701954271937,0.0,0.08331048984833779,0.0,0.07675197068866557,0.0,0.0,0.08219972940987436,0.0,0.053082032732605484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861567989259513,0.06839937031145896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734666722523945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713135232726559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061269601678448,0.0,0.0,0.110892269842417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08568611374391351,0.0,0.07383010170067449,0.0,0.0,0.06296295410971857,0.2054055385827513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052042498527552335,0.10038820597083184,0.0,0.12437897046212144,0.13703384595415752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21273813106713024,0.0,0.0,0.08154981934350522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234293640472504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068543212187824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057029037943023664,0.07955330880657109,0.15966074454893356,0.0,0.17129472628342066,0.0,0.05044537069146583
mentalhealth,newlifejoan19,2020/02/23,"Is it suicidal thoughts? I’m bipolar and for the last few months I’ve been really depressed. I don’t actually think about suicide but sometimes when I’m feeling blue, I look at things such as my cat or the sunrise and think “see, this is what makes it worth being alive”. Is it concerning that I have such thoughts?",5.311935483870967,5.999415838709679,5.300161290322581,84.6702419354839,68.03225806451613,8.780645161290323,33.24193548387097,8.841846274778883,2.5762774193548377,250,11,51,4,4,78,47,62,0.126,0.758,0.11599999999999999,-0.1671,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,7,1,0,1,0,10,17,6,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,4,4,0,4,13,1,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,3,32,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.2453767825035997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21657162300044014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271395636103862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049635185310748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21115282453104872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784336003981407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20070323622254546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16108390034364362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20037134275606885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486883052084519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5500861664698994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16705074636769926,0.3222351963955661,0.0,0.39924293483225703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kjkova69,2020/02/23,"Does anger hurt any part of your body? I have been angry since early morning today (it's already evening from where I am). 

I'm a very calm person but I haven't been this angry for a very long time.

My left leg started hurting after I got mad that I had to use a walking stick. I'm just wondering if that anger caused it. 

Also I feel like hurting someone and I do not want to do that. Any way to release this without resulting to violence? 

I know the answer is obvious. I just have to calm down, take deep breaths and all that. But I'm having a hard time doing all that right now. I can't think straight.",0.6390476190476164,2.8444979841269853,2.248571428571431,94.97142857142859,85.03174603174601,4.8698412698412685,21.698412698412696,6.1826913282559595,0.21797460317460304,470,16,103,4,14,153,83,126,0.24,0.665,0.094,-0.9585,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,6,9,3,0,5,0,13,3,3,3,3,21,25,6,0,2,7,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,4,2,12,3,11,21,3,16,0,3,0,0,2,6,0,2,9,65,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824587399749707,0.1322237430772986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22487612869992965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18365741803591773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16985152958905805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469168548542055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920667090911404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08360176013920287,0.11812018400603007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322389070705524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811373755077314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5310053106029523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908675054085186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17964430241169754,0.0,0.0,0.0807776305770675,0.0,0.0,0.14632225165642146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17904901004331605,0.0,0.0,0.14437004440044438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120095678911534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367724097167832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140093533877117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702974638447602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431642398468823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594432147032444,0.0,0.0,0.1928242159216781,0.0,0.1567246524244882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428021909973762,0.0,0.2728485304941907,0.09752285194458134,0.13124059042395553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15938355320111608,0.1793060821077632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BrownChair5,2020/02/23,"Is this normal? I was diagnosed with High-Functioning Autism at quite a later age than usual. Most people have said to me that you usually get diagnosed at 2 or 3 years old, so I’m wondering if this is normal..?",4.073571428571427,5.1852335000000025,5.884285714285718,77.81071428571428,71.14285714285714,10.361904761904762,25.904761904761905,10.504223727775694,2.8219904761904764,165,5,32,5,3,57,36,42,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,7,8,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,5,6,1,8,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,4,6,20,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4607535460297166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858606075524848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23981355397870605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44477833534858224,0.0,0.0,0.2381740721768004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735720158686803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414178695025051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21590700659517445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4999659708197712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461467630227375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14616568018302192
mentalhealth,dead_cells,2020/02/23,"I really wish I could help everyone here. I really wish the world wasn't such a crazy, dystopian shit hole. I wish a lot of things. My life is in hell. Literally the worst life I've ever seen or heard of. By far. I never, ever imagined it was even possible for life to get this bad or to feel like I do. I'm just in hell. The worst physical and mental health ever, and it's compounding, and builds upon itself, and the amount of inhuman stress I have pisses me off and stresses me out more and has done a number on my physical health in a bad way. And thinking about *that* pisses me off and stresses me out even more. Like, I have to deal with the shittiest and most stressful life, on top of the shittiest and most stressful physical pain and diseases, like as if I deserve to be made so physically ill just because I've endured such a shitty life. The anxiety of knowing I'm dying and not wanting to go into the hospital and hear those words. The fact I have to die prematurely in my 20s after living the shittiest most unhappy life I've ever seen. The loneliest person I've ever heard of with absolutely 0 friends. I spend all day every day on reddit and I dont even like it. But I have literally nothing else to do with my life. And I've been severely suicidal many times, especially with my mood dips, yet I still dont want to die and am afraid of death. Sorry I know this is gonna go ignored cuz everyone else is too busy dealing with their own shitty life problems cuz this world is fucked and a mistake. If a god really did this then hes such a fucking asshole.",3.2219811320754737,4.708422367924528,4.84438490566038,82.98646415094342,73.74842767295598,8.232654088050317,26.55647798742139,8.841846274778883,1.996846893081761,1235,44,250,25,25,417,162,318,0.309,0.606,0.085,-0.9982,0,0,0,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,1,1,19,27,7,6,19,0,22,17,3,3,8,63,45,27,5,10,8,0,1,4,1,1,12,3,0,1,11,25,0,1,5,0,1,2,5,21,0,0,10,6,26,5,38,32,11,33,2,0,2,2,10,17,7,8,17,170,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057881422612379864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263496551367492,0.04612301206902093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06041015876031024,0.0,0.0,0.09759179799898952,0.1560089376633876,0.0,0.0,0.23557644434211836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742876243791474,0.17735121291287784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264122206887517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499226295223786,0.3422042343641564,0.06374871822762362,0.14459706575108086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03825711258731796,0.054053134417613405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05845647520477991,0.13989708228471492,0.03953040855795615,0.0,0.08600121319309549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16085089075487338,0.08527686717759822,0.0,0.050714818694923884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316399987641612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4275399406712482,0.1478590356173386,0.0,0.06681116271077939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432534864314628,0.0,0.07159346084967738,0.0,0.07670965705098827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624976319237872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835540015809058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259998010727188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050998035137938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606536792607481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529783087886397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239856542060676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541354562933978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547681858876363,0.07766622367976116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469770669347887,0.0,0.0,0.060423979417559184,0.0,0.4333543220271613,0.0,0.0,0.08276223311516033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05026664423018743,0.048481321777537584,0.0,0.0,0.04411927288249607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925512382676881,0.060057181039193636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610235985095251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wettcucumber,2020/02/23,"I have a big hole in me and I going down a way I don't know where it's taking me I moved to a new state where I live, I've been here a month now, I didn't find a job yet, I'm running low on money, I lay in my bed almost every day all day, It's making me less patient and bored with myself, only thing going for me now is I'm learning bjj and Muay Thai.
 I didn't make new friends yet other than my housemate. She's a very kind girl, she asks me how my day was and what I did during the day, sometimes I have to lie and say I've done stuff so I don't look pathetic. She took me out Friday night to city, just the two of us, I felt kinda excited that someone interested in going out with me, especially since I don't drink and she knows that. Thing about me is I used to be Security guard in bars, so she told that we can go to bars and ask if they need guards. We went from bar to bar, we talked for a bit and I did speak to one guard who was working on the front door in one the venues we went to. Around 12:30, towards the end we went to this nightclub, thing is I never been to nightclub before although I worked in bars but it's kinda different, and I've never danced in my life, and the first thing she wants to do when we got in is dance. I didn't want to look like party pooper, although my anxiety was skyrocketing, I panickly said yes and we went to the dancefloor. She was dancing and we started on very slow beat, I was trying to dance but I knew I was failing miserably, so I started watching the other boys who were dancing, thing is almost all of them had a drink in their hand and were doing the 2 step move, since I had no drink in my hand I I panicked even more, finally I remembered when we were in Muay Thai class, the instructor was telling to relax and follow the rythm of our partners, and that's what I did, I let my hands loosen up, and was moving on her rythm and It was working to the point i was trying to add more moves without making a fool out of myself. She was having a good so I was having a good time. We danced for about 2 hours before we headed home. 
I woke in the morning happy, kinda energized, but with time, I felt going back to the same routine, me laying in bed, think about going out but don't do it, and I feel like I'm back to the same place I was before but somehow I'm feeling even worse, the idea that still I don't have a job, still I don't have friends here, still I don't go out the house and i almost waste my day doing nothing, and it's taking it's toll on me.
I was never depressed but I feel like I will be if i stay like that, I feel like I have no value at all and I'm feeling really sad for a continuous period of time with no break and honestly I don't know what to do.",4.297985078440391,3.4544163507588515,5.5662425264448885,87.16135622668507,70.14671163575042,8.402044049261589,26.23276610966324,7.348242739294969,1.042467566048341,2108,49,498,18,33,711,237,593,0.075,0.79,0.135,0.9882,3,0,3,0,0,0,53.0,13,0,3,6,28,24,0,1,30,1,58,13,4,5,6,96,107,39,0,5,10,0,10,5,3,1,1,3,4,3,27,44,8,4,16,15,1,26,18,7,0,4,40,16,91,17,67,63,9,99,0,5,3,0,40,34,0,9,40,347,118,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021639842538356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148184530486488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059908393572351226,0.12582679221780985,0.0,0.0,0.10349412520971872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17179378540178208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347064377761403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21700424855025105,0.0,0.05796260990148126,0.0,0.0,0.07031080188299699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886796125711124,0.0,0.19777564510122228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05960496400630438,0.0,0.0,0.08889776457243756,0.0,0.05670043171115832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013634626957572,0.14423047907613742,0.12923090662584205,0.0737203227453045,0.06150802913890133,0.05724259868848078,0.0,0.0,0.10398663604776287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677241390818438,0.11289067660078173,0.0538233751208202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163866367542154,0.0,0.0,0.06906590174798376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675041479488236,0.0,0.06627376313272769,0.07765143782782233,0.0,0.07596986260928469,0.0,0.0,0.13356332150451,0.0,0.0,0.07007923066733039,0.1109536354672042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688155074278243,0.047533699272321935,0.16438901410463605,0.0,0.05942428136828201,0.0,0.11302467634796486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476335081796711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05371564023929674,0.2861032677185023,0.0,0.04989970268098885,0.15571025458865015,0.12999128078434727,0.0,0.0631534603939794,0.0,0.06457306638865218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120406681688743,0.051182226545178816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031080188299699,0.0,0.06361720044967784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04311203447465841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762341223613329,0.0,0.06401463964006641,0.05351709307074677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11133716812159347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057020335337817626,0.0,0.0665582268911967,0.0,0.09526600120168087,0.07172940333270207,0.16122986378087673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703870171855409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119759260014054,0.054090595046900766,0.05882034372417948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22354492041283175,0.04312105327198253,0.0,0.0,0.11772386435854365,0.0,0.0,0.06430494824208369,0.07476918829898338,0.09138017951424612,0.0,0.06573916626688263,0.0,0.08094972899147837,0.058122802618340526,0.0,0.11105376725564033,0.07938675779080581,0.05341704409049434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24953912223163555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648716853615254,0.0,0.14697855147877942,0.0,0.0685811585589979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExistenceIllogical,2020/02/23,"Need help getting over an ex-girlfriend My mental health has been shit lately. The biggest thing I've been struggling with is loneliness. There is no intimacy or affection with a SO. This is having a negative compounding effect as it is making me think more and more about what I had with my ex-girlfriend.

I (24M) was with my then-girlfriend for over 3 years. We lived together. We broke up nearly 2 years ago now and I'm definitely still not over her. 

All of my friends have got partners or spouses and I'm just there with no-one. I can't seem to meet anyone new (dating apps are shit) and I feel like she was the only person who did or could love me.

How do I get over her to try and move on with my life and help me find someone new?",2.2955617408906903,3.988928809210528,3.487105263157897,90.88704453441298,76.69736842105263,6.519028340080973,22.87651821862348,7.321109707123232,0.7110064777327936,577,17,126,7,13,187,103,152,0.11199999999999999,0.755,0.133,0.5267,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,2,0,0,1,8,7,2,1,5,0,17,5,2,4,1,30,28,12,0,2,5,1,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,2,5,14,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,7,1,18,3,19,20,3,18,0,1,0,1,14,8,2,4,10,86,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15908215996167552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548394400179516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14328573656273258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09074133669449556,0.1282076282779223,0.0,0.0,0.1640249395230476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386518307262099,0.0,0.18752288764299235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14353208796825598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19075962413896244,0.0,0.0,0.2405790781043889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20244085747356896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675925822370776,0.08767602693259692,0.0,0.1584681592645666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619713853827226,0.0,0.11979222212828187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808554009120073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907396149813941,0.0,0.13306873637560113,0.0,0.3466508725393524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648887358704653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15669922242937245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633753877358725,0.0,0.0,0.3684301546087633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520574986112535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14331851752365593,0.0,0.0,0.1876125594202451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922652234099587,0.11499194908577733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184286042218308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311351793596809
mentalhealth,quest-tions,2020/02/23,"I’ve been in lexapro for a few years and about a week ago I quit cold turkey, please lend advice. I’ve been on lexapro for a few years now. A few days ago(maybe a week ago) I stopped my daily 10mg. I’ve been in a haze ever since. (Can remember what I did the day before, depersonalization, etc.) I’m so dizzy, any time I stand up my hands and lips tingle too and I’m not sure if I should go back on at 5mg and begin tapering down or what. I HAVE called a psychiatrist, and I’ve gotten no response I’m still working on seeing a doctor. My question is, should I continue coming off, or maybe take one now and start using 5mg for a month and then come off.",2.489148936170213,3.1598481631205684,4.21963829787234,89.92350000000002,74.46099290780141,7.058439716312058,22.610638297872338,7.1686216300943375,0.48954127659574503,505,12,120,5,10,171,86,141,0.071,0.91,0.019,-0.6432,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,8,1,0,0,10,0,9,4,2,1,2,21,21,12,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,9,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,5,3,10,1,14,14,4,34,0,0,1,0,2,10,0,4,20,70,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572118688833442,0.4237793840887116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836778673017873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253520138255515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13560052191575694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16272065671668318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745427808585077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055433329618833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16310798300525575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17772446103444495,0.0,0.14414694744246115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056588955691423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32018975736375904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12719672311403848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798399108808404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17492542521428606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17851558928012812,0.1694951003050442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18051968682935576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698638389802314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182122453325232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279324907093854,0.0,0.12726219185380666,0.13322904922932413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019147974679778,0.0,0.1198161476659695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929219727688281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13763272667554374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25565211331930265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601332518712687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20524053728772745
mentalhealth,guddaK,2020/02/23,"voices in my head! does anyone ever feel like they hear two different people having their own conversation in their head? whether it’s amongst themselves, or about you? lately it’s been happening more often and it scares the f out of me",3.4156818181818167,6.360903750000002,3.6647272727272733,84.46209090909093,79.68181818181819,6.247272727272727,22.43636363636364,7.554174236665415,1.2318145454545448,191,6,33,3,5,59,38,44,0.054000000000000006,0.875,0.071,0.1906,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,3,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,2,2,2,0,1,7,5,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,3,6,1,5,4,2,5,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,2,3,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18591963747663956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27780319070292026,0.0,0.0,0.23268609471532506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24051682480409034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344442634202265,0.18995510509958208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351296544261837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5457689959586179,0.0,0.2996824595245922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999406109789437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12990263632825655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18433778760547875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26620680984050776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259740319467273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cheeseburgereater,2020/02/23,I just feel down all the time I have Been thus way maybe for a few months to a year I don’t know why when I stop to think about it my life is great but my brain kind of ignores it can anyone help stop it or help me figure the cause,0.9327777777777796,1.4981628333333354,2.1305555555555564,103.83250000000002,78.07407407407408,5.4,15.351851851851851,3.1291,-1.4659481481481484,179,1,51,0,4,57,43,54,0.129,0.705,0.166,0.4872,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,5,2,1,2,1,13,8,3,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,7,2,6,7,2,8,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,6,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805636978125022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882753146796458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652781581646524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057121712537992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847046547070813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461785354645038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26891168889171885,0.14191903087425167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18239879674578185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594314527766744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061204639248863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4317915236039436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16546636074251775,0.0,0.0,0.15057872299709116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20497467516684206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23301663970601866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16629467224564948
mentalhealth,vomitedd,2020/02/23,"Pessimistic rant because I'm sad. Saying I should stay alive because people care about me, or because they love me, or because it would be ""selfish"" doesn't help. 

I care about plenty of things but could live without them. 
I love candy. Is it good for me? No. Would I better without it? Absolutely. Which is exactly how I feel about those in my life without me. They'd be better off. 

Isn't is selfish to keep me around for your own selfish wants even though I don't want to live? I didn't ask to be here, and now I have to take care of myself and be miserable day In and day out to survive.",0.43126721763085385,2.7873163140495905,1.8915371900826443,95.86882093663912,88.33884297520659,4.2184022038567495,20.46336088154269,5.6839178017228535,-0.11410457300275435,458,15,99,3,15,147,71,121,0.11,0.627,0.264,0.9774,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,3,3,9,13,0,1,0,0,17,3,0,1,1,21,29,8,0,6,6,0,1,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,6,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,1,2,19,8,20,19,1,9,0,2,0,2,9,5,0,2,3,74,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12862147521508133,0.13507312307657526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3523046482652351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555688778429797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4419334866529007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535879151739607,0.0,0.0,0.1863605742842356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543038079314296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305549870392852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118640224332868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968446419729326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284241005399245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205338781872686,0.0,0.0,0.2551642024569989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608050700143322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016707787229452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489954995486787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15400081896383286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863405670129726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959888113361338,0.0,0.14195488782920127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17044092306137676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41783252930047743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20527470849358145,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,johnathon98721,2020/02/23,"Problem with constant boredom Hi! I’m new to this whole Reddit thing so forgive me if I have no idea what I’m doing.

I’ve been having problems with SEVERE boredom and I’m not sure how to solve it. No matter what I do, I can’t resolve it. I’ve tried everything imaginable and nothing has worked what so ever. I’ve tried working, changing careers, changing scenery, traveling, hobbies, you name it. It’s like every day is the same thing, same constant boredom and just blank. I’ve even tried street racing with a couple buddies of mine but that did absolutely nothing for me so I gave it up.

I honestly have no idea what to do about this because I’ve tried everything I could think of and it’s about to drive me up a wall.

Have any of you guys experienced this? If so how did you solve it? What can I do?

For the record, I haven’t been diagnosed with anything. So I don’t really have an explanation or anything to point the blame at.",1.9314641657334803,4.196707515957448,3.332777155655098,88.79184210526316,80.22340425531915,6.08555431131019,25.852183650615906,7.273561745256523,1.286687234042553,735,30,149,10,19,240,98,188,0.122,0.8009999999999999,0.077,-0.7318,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,3,0,3,12,7,0,0,6,0,20,1,0,2,2,31,25,15,0,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,18,8,0,0,6,1,0,2,7,2,0,0,5,1,16,5,19,19,3,13,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,3,6,104,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941461765590882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278540435587286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439373737152192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929092627020288,0.0,0.0,0.2992160015925263,0.0,0.11053569236458996,0.1531848540312674,0.0,0.08928446127516941,0.0,0.0,0.14051701310636694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144047952336444,0.12522987110700376,0.11664443284454867,0.0,0.2488477830404607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370806113821025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125712192979446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763639266025641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13370938072454502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656801184268744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13087364666661452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264943040018216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869030902072525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15640149798843067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304811512402605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18395112467338112,0.08870886253905068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3759755928128024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15456697595143415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015767106782204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reallytalkative_not,2020/02/23,Any success stories around here? Or is the only choice to ''learn to live with it?'',1.1156250000000014,3.6526993125000047,1.5425000000000004,98.2525,87.125,3.2,20.5,3.1291,-0.5730249999999999,63,2,13,0,2,19,15,16,0.0,0.787,0.213,0.6199,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,9,1,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4206829795138642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5507031725321729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5462530093622909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4704885718835032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw07152019,2020/02/23,"Screw it Hey guys, 

I’m done, I don’t know what it is but I really can’t do this stuff anymore. I play football at a NCAA Div 1 school and I’m happy, I’m starting on the team, fairly liked, and have tons of friends in the team. Nothing is really wrong, me and my girlfriend are doing real well. I’m finding I’m just getting in my head a whole lot and getting angry at everything when there is nothing to be angry about. Most nights I don’t sleep, I don’t eat that much anymore. Really I just don’t feel like myself. I don’t want help from the counselors at my school because last time I did my information got leaked so I can’t trust them. I don’t wanna tell my girlfriend because I don’t want to worry her. My parents live far away and worry enough as is. My teammates always say I’m in a happy mood and I’m always there for them and don’t want them to worry about me. 

I’m sorry I’m rambling on. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know who will see this or why I’m really posting it. I just know that I had to get it out there. Thanks for reading y’all.",0.21118305654039915,1.971601064377684,2.5411270759470064,94.88737264415,83.4206008583691,5.082216831498414,19.57249486844561,6.0469075449839425,-0.16689945885426385,820,22,193,6,23,280,114,233,0.10800000000000001,0.698,0.195,0.9689,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,3,2,11,12,1,0,6,0,26,4,2,0,0,27,51,12,0,4,5,1,1,2,3,1,0,1,0,1,12,8,1,0,7,4,0,0,12,2,1,0,4,3,30,9,23,45,6,17,0,0,1,1,18,11,1,3,7,121,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18930106404102767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22562225311724135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687347245538983,0.0,0.0,0.1386839685929909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640748919503364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639639359077812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753592025598936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022326987833585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057516280512843215,0.08126424164045429,0.0,0.0,0.1039669986840962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788428603952554,0.0,0.17829171468840052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097763086706966,0.0,0.0,0.11263207315924953,0.0,0.24218161291604015,0.0,0.0,0.11674206793283713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624537088515597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500598514613276,0.09272282279384507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114667566083457,0.0,0.10044484060556737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09670763281471716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836205924986468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674827052008937,0.0,0.218295660005502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630780813216078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894269066711107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11378248903070325,0.12947434507737218,0.29148902309150354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045992243220766,0.0,0.2302455991834217,0.0906453823611492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383385632532718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733572210547653,0.08051404312766422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021848874575173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942400503127366,0.10472728804848107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632953465425705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20128111057174086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227644490768344,0.0,0.10264322190258887,0.12699971766859855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34656113786665266,0.0,0.0,0.1243696336915396,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,prophetblue,2020/02/23,"How to help with overwhelming loneliness? Don't really know the right subreddit here, but I have intense feelings of loneliness lately and would like to receive some advice, I guess. If anyone has suggestions for some other places to ask, feel free to let me know. 

A little bit if backstory: during my teenage years I spent a good amount of time in and out of hospitals and psych wards for suicidal thoughts, depression etc. And have learned to overcome it for the most parts without meds. The meds made me gain a metric fuckton of weight and I felt like a zombie all the time, so I've learned to take natural approaches like working out and destressing by playing video games for my depression. It's worked wonders, but I've been struggling with very overwhelming feelings of loneliness that have sometimes led to suicidal thought recently. 

This really doesn't feel like the right place, but I am trying to find some help with how to deal with loneliness. I have two friends,but one lives about 2 hours away from me and the other has a kid and wife so we can't do stuff very often. I am on a few dating sites but I do not have good luck at all with women or making new friends. I have tried in the past but it usually falls through and I don't understand why. Dates that I feel like go fine but then they don't end up talking to me again, matches in my dating apps that will unmatch me after talking with me a bit etc. What am I doing wrong?  What are some great ways to get out of my shell and meet some people? Thanks in advance.",5.663044860473331,6.345169818791945,5.455030024726247,83.88800953726602,67.255033557047,9.226704344754504,30.78488166725539,9.276330184999452,2.489950335570469,1218,45,241,22,19,377,164,298,0.134,0.6890000000000001,0.177,0.9005,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,1,4,8,20,0,3,14,0,24,1,0,5,2,63,45,24,2,3,11,1,7,5,1,2,0,0,0,2,12,20,1,0,15,3,2,6,7,6,0,2,6,7,24,15,44,36,15,40,0,4,0,0,16,17,0,13,21,160,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690235024197576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933808725943673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270537203454696,0.0,0.09316826255791552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21652378622928345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223419089809394,0.17082038635169355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783026676457077,0.0,0.22118914341535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507026206345112,0.1416862019691193,0.095213420496106,0.0,0.09063450834164252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661420601696307,0.0,0.051809330866845166,0.0,0.05635744066164474,0.16634886718547165,0.0,0.10932915325951276,0.10924081862957913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293567749319646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765700546054826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899637375339803,0.0,0.11186181588440278,0.0,0.0,0.101402365988944,0.0,0.24223369987184015,0.09938882765693073,0.08756402376683063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383179775704394,0.06619303861547265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22029869191226112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957736411614128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671963959049929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738543295053224,0.09466368566493118,0.0687481418083455,0.0,0.20721148276044055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270545684172251,0.0,0.09791292844756548,0.0,0.0,0.1693717923842225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807617403497343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366821125626327,0.11351956730350735,0.2169396206697848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455932322232924,0.15940925295823272,0.0,0.0912972999352306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745098880311653,0.11564717339172632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465230081980592,0.0,0.0968692558809376,0.10323368688970423,0.0,0.0,0.10921562888334052,0.16364210877204424,0.0,0.07871212256326042,0.0,0.1207555817869034,0.0,0.0,0.08948048966971225,0.0,0.0,0.09559098853188527,0.10753961305425616,0.14438579739416782,0.0,0.0,0.07044357821426908,0.10842075605657717,0.0,0.06385865284461349
mentalhealth,brogers6410,2020/02/23,"drunk, self harmed hi. i’m drunk and i just relapsed worse than i ever have before. i feel like i have no one. i’m 19 years old, female. i just want someone to talk to please. i’m sorry if this is triggering.",-2.2880000000000003,-0.9427864666666644,0.257777777777779,102.12000000000003,113.66666666666666,2.8888888888888893,11.666666666666668,5.033348758259628,-1.5056666666666665,159,3,38,1,9,53,32,45,0.298,0.5760000000000001,0.126,-0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,8,8,2,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,5,1,3,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587047923621293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750100484930609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372530979039248,0.21719712418244155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14853235462886724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190254501627467,0.0,0.20601672912610386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33373061673784365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171667218393723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576012976166029,0.0,0.0,0.34033360908441807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24436558274139975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17932314585076975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098297358684741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19578357750090447
mentalhealth,backpackladd69,2020/02/23,"Why do I fuckedover? Man I wish I could talk to a machine that just understood what I was saying. I can't express myself even to my own family. I want my family back. My mother wants nothing nothing to do me, my sister thinks I'm a piece of shit, and I'm failing school. I think I just want to someone to care what happens to me.",0.7278571428571432,2.6599252142857166,3.1442857142857146,90.33071428571432,82.57142857142857,5.7142857142857135,22.857142857142854,6.868970318607317,0.7245714285714286,255,9,55,3,7,88,44,70,0.10400000000000001,0.768,0.128,-0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,0,2,0,5,1,1,0,0,11,16,1,0,5,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,15,1,7,13,2,1,0,1,0,0,6,0,1,0,1,39,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650359583165444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21882791419348066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713632785975714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176000559143873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40466502709335866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897951472756495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41188339420403397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17068108403928986,0.0,0.21721535574692388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22031292416997209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818539103922734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725101433803725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750503697070573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3797800973659144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19366870888871812,0.0,0.24681201831965216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway3291564870,2020/02/23,"Relapsed - Who do I go to? (UK) I'll try to keep it brief. I haven't cut since March of last year. More close calls than I can count but until tonight I held off. This last year has just been brutally draining. I have overwhelming apathy to the point where it's present for most of the day. I went through multiple jobs and just didn't give a fuck. I started a new job today, everyone was really nice, really social and smiley and it just killed me knowing I can't display genuine energy or be a people person which is a pretty big thing for this job. I've just grown tired of not feeling a damn thing and tonight I finally felt something.

I know this is a dangerous slope to get back onto, especially with the regularity and severity of my past self harming. Where do I go before it escalates again?",1.9087347391786904,4.333298955974846,3.494125046244913,86.67006659267481,81.45283018867924,7.263189049204588,23.81834998150204,8.313332769828598,1.6568620791712916,630,23,127,14,17,208,108,159,0.18100000000000002,0.701,0.11800000000000001,-0.9206,3,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,8,9,6,1,9,0,13,2,0,0,0,21,26,8,1,0,7,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,11,7,0,2,4,0,0,5,4,8,0,0,6,2,13,1,16,19,2,29,0,1,0,1,6,7,2,2,17,80,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11733003158162322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984035068575325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558084499485628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840603139222988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458034761453265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771526029735135,0.0,0.14650750779337945,0.16715166737023224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141064279511825,0.07972044178430206,0.14637541318134392,0.1734374867309492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.454257341617659,0.13562639112686756,0.1688149757883274,0.0,0.16771571690126547,0.2487576411343065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14736953473307754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456616156949443,0.10578465587399476,0.13323313645968174,0.0,0.0,0.14424409352259973,0.0,0.0,0.1552358974855249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19550235749940684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15918158304477995,0.17237994720500804,0.0,0.1262215939836588,0.0,0.0,0.15554329335850084,0.0,0.11746897459728672,0.0,0.0,0.10800190742226334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20274412692546528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17537638061911828,0.1446346926731551,0.0,0.0,0.1035965986147982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14144973462483512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19652212956028714
mentalhealth,Jaej96,2020/02/23,I snap easily and can go from 0-100 in a few seconds The tiniest things can set me off. Earlier today I had a customer at work who was complaining to my boss about me and I immediately fantasized about hunting him down finding where he lives and slaughtering his family and thinking of ways to torture him. In public it never shows I always have a smile on my face to mask my true feelings but when I’m alone I become a psychopath. Worried that one of these days I’m actually going to break and do something I’ll regret. Is this a personality problem?,4.438555045871559,5.816774449541285,6.070538990825689,75.80745986238534,70.55963302752293,8.752752293577982,31.05619266055045,9.188382445141503,2.8316321100917428,441,19,81,9,8,151,82,109,0.152,0.7979999999999999,0.05,-0.9011,0,1,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,1,0,6,0,7,1,1,1,2,14,13,7,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,3,1,0,2,1,4,0,2,2,1,13,1,15,11,1,17,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,0,4,59,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.2465123301840205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616292728668376,0.0,0.0,0.21019295809720254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789894937667969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629134836731434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23813958802305185,0.0,0.12772793645917185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23088228382236525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871298106742322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22306053354153765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19482951899284148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711760524225009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22057056965168811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24171503645687825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19447263144753796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678238190505136,0.1618632136266013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23944611229631085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20051120654186527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839041401770495,0.2565391839316739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GloriousEyebags1234,2020/02/23,"AND IF I ASK YOU TO LIST ALL THE THINGS YOU LOVE, HOW LONG WILL IT TAKE TO NAME YOURSELF? Saw this somewhere, and just hit me like a bomb.",-1.9450000000000005,-0.15253883333333107,-0.6633333333333322,110.505,104.0,2.4000000000000004,12.666666666666668,3.1291,-2.059133333333333,105,2,28,0,5,32,27,30,0.09,0.7020000000000001,0.209,0.6408,0,0,0,0,1,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,7,6,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,2,2,3,1,1,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,1,2,18,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4848949887097281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534004331932361,0.0,0.0,0.4590147258673525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4681281834593598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38998217038192345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3445873799979286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hawkfluent,2020/02/23,"Am I 'Normal' or should I see a therapist/phycologist? Hi everyone, 

No idea if this is the right subreddit for this, if not I would love to know a better place to post this.

I've been thinking about some of my 'issues' and wonder if anything could be related to something greater. 

Anyway, here goes;

I get tired when reading after about 30min, even if the topic is interesting.
Always get tired during lessons, conferences or meetings. I really struggle to stay awake and concentrate.

Usually find it difficult to listen. If I'm talking to family or friends I sometimes find myself getting easily distracted or blanking out completely. Sometimes getting asked to do something by my parents and completely forgetting that I was asked
Although as a side note I don't have this issue as badly when my boss asks me to do something.

I generally fidget when I'm not doing anything stimulating. Tapping feet or touching my fingers with my thumbs.

I can get frustrated when something doesn't work, one of the reasons I gave up drawing and it often happens if I try to cook something and it doesn't turn out as planned. 
This frustration can also easily lead to anger if I don't calm myself down. Often resulting in punching a wall.

I have no motivation for anything, in my head I tell myself I would like to learn programming, computer science, archery, train my dog, learn more about horses and disabilities relating to my job. But when it gets around to eat I generally procrastinate with YouTube or searching random things online.

I love food, I find comforting and often have the need to eat, especially if I'm also consuming entertaining media. 

I get stressed easily, this was apparent when I was studying towards my level 2 equine course. 
It was a very basic and repetitive course so maybe that was a factor of my stress/annoyance at it.

I rarely also get mood swings, which range from mild depression and just general normal happiness. 
These moods can change withing a day or last week's. 


And that's all I could think of right now, any help would be appreciated. 
Are these normal things?",6.1289653222766685,7.968448989445914,6.470458914436492,72.7812104221636,67.02110817941953,9.84700339238598,33.5884847342631,10.125756701596842,3.777907576328685,1673,76,273,42,28,539,212,379,0.129,0.773,0.098,-0.9066,3,0,5,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,0,6,22,21,3,3,11,0,31,11,3,6,1,72,57,40,0,18,19,1,2,1,1,4,2,2,0,0,20,16,4,0,13,3,0,1,8,9,0,1,7,5,37,10,41,42,4,31,0,1,1,2,14,15,0,21,14,194,57,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19697604555254705,0.06831725370712534,0.0,0.0,0.055833656824884816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20269422942899626,0.07309012592586561,0.2302689708314567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855355952007589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261447372236833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685533418487185,0.0,0.17216933803539156,0.0,0.0,0.13110701124462806,0.0,0.0,0.052950402797332735,0.0,0.07071620859896177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680261437899192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054229035529723725,0.0,0.0,0.07845406101557237,0.0,0.0,0.07740051236710609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22512519500884698,0.0,0.09928069849695652,0.0,0.06343348460979148,0.0,0.3431683561618291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260445385875415,0.08740142469141146,0.0,0.0,0.0842625741557749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055032700139774536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268562372612127,0.0,0.1713908619534922,0.08147572823874648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04512230927171932,0.06692586374342864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04011195435319427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14820445324216444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248468281447653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06087920798964577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413339875686217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055635916197174534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911669738051293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578139150685869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863310727327805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212639701649044,0.0,0.05259803911896768,0.08441676988824781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402330395900545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542640016861043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3160390391277944,0.16240626379022347,0.0,0.0,0.08751212992955297,0.0,0.0,0.18810011804918952,0.08583311405449785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659922285949524,0.07176267086198629,0.0,0.0,0.0953292793707856,0.10909273581725402,0.10521808467118496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887333502538523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055743347714358696,0.08930576935586734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904261529824661,0.06774454587447515,0.0,0.0,0.06585901951272123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903847920984423,0.05977281977475269,0.0,0.0,0.17497335808155934,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigOnionaid,2020/02/23,"What can I do about this? Ok so long story short my mind isn't in one area. It's constantly thinking about one thing then another with no breaks. I can't meditate, focus, or even maintain a proper conversation. Its so weird bc I wake up randomly to search up random shit like ""how do u know your racist?""(yes I've convinced myself that I am racist, but I'm not) ""am I autistic?"". I. Can't. Get. A. Break. 

If you need more details I'll gladly edit, but this is just a basic run down of what is going on",0.14192307692307793,2.4371531923076937,2.1665384615384617,93.77846153846157,89.19230769230771,5.123076923076923,18.576923076923077,6.67199483983844,0.09211923076923112,388,11,85,5,13,129,82,104,0.08199999999999999,0.823,0.095,0.3324,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,0,0,7,6,1,0,3,1,10,2,2,1,0,14,16,8,0,2,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,2,0,2,0,0,10,4,10,16,1,14,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,4,4,56,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326743301955557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3428448955872911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095469593055531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16575503524348476,0.0,0.18030592958461733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435756716622766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499700454580118,0.0,0.0,0.2807647431983584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32034173352026196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23524395731080774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4299666019657085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3256623979586005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107731665290235,0.20328712737953947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chiiruyo,2020/02/23,"how do i get help? at my limit i saw my school counselor- didn't get into details, like suicidal ideation and self-harm, however, that's probably my fault and the reason why i'm not getting the help i need rn. she referred my parent to a therapy center with a 4week waiting list.. i can't wait that long. i needed help a week ago where i thought i couldn't take it anymore. what do i do if i need to get help asap? not to be dramatic but i don't think i can wait 4weeks. not like i'm going to kill myself, but i can't stop thinking about it. it was hard enough to have to talk to her, what am i supposed to tell my parent that i need help immediately? im awful.

any advice on getting help or what u would do in this situation? i'm a minor in the US (midwest), thank you :)",1.3524268502581762,2.743831987951811,3.67765920826162,89.81445783132533,78.51807228915663,6.429604130808951,23.302925989672985,7.1686216300943375,0.7289600688468156,594,19,136,7,14,206,98,166,0.1,0.721,0.179,0.8832,3,0,0,0,0,2,24.0,1,1,0,1,3,5,1,0,7,1,15,0,0,2,0,28,37,7,2,7,7,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,5,5,0,0,1,8,2,0,0,4,2,24,3,15,30,1,12,0,0,1,0,14,7,0,2,6,83,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225913313287268,0.11120661639608677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531241967688448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441577910235585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962660277630045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3277203716089946,0.0,0.07129789591004128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238134888656534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5045314683580663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13551089127836494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879528351888307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225801095053674,0.0,0.0,0.11102205835317044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720875784939929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786016740522089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352596756215662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898669566030235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696524926736094,0.0,0.0,0.13087495849531444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14101455672336355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10488442095162882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722534515131718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943251291013046,0.10083446117389587,0.10965155144527887,0.11550037246598988,0.14346656951958858,0.0,0.0,0.16077058010403056,0.0,0.09959575948467192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15090464983702026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10063092105536628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132019226485662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911829295452665,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sporktine,2020/02/23,"Is this a normal feeling? I'm usually happy with my body - I work out pretty often, I eat well, etc, etc, so I'm in pretty good physical shape/health. However, sometimes I have these short episodes (for lack of a better word) where I become hyperaware of an imperfection in my body (could be thinking my hips are too wide, noticing I have a slight double chin, etc). During these times, I get really down on myself about that one imperfection and worry about it a lot. Then suddenly, usually in a few days to a week, those feelings stop, and I'm back to feeling generally happy with my body again. 

Is this something any of you experience, and does it sound normal or like a possible symptom of something else? It just started happening to me within the past year or so, and I'm not sure why.",5.3198684210526315,6.158900723684213,6.330105263157897,76.75173684210529,68.07894736842105,9.501052631578947,30.33157894736842,9.642632912329526,2.8099268421052623,618,23,115,13,10,206,100,152,0.06,0.765,0.17600000000000002,0.9531,1,0,2,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,0,2,11,7,0,0,9,0,7,6,4,0,1,25,18,9,0,4,4,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,9,7,1,1,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,4,13,7,19,16,7,23,0,0,0,0,1,10,0,4,14,82,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171924873691615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240277856501188,0.0,0.0,0.13271755705245536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106279985540437,0.0,0.4004430255970067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594541242978599,0.0,0.0,0.07749926089359385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10516096932746977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296320015128773,0.10038603522191042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4020616239234385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11754863977133782,0.0,0.0,0.18228363511475704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278350248440179,0.0,0.0,0.10079231232553892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626532026910138,0.2558449211635721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773435271382094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058708652836286276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021636465109126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354808106831384,0.0,0.13681355114990806,0.0,0.0,0.08142983162795027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471519984308852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354728365391356,0.0,0.2445107713231452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769835344175638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850244051186664,0.11885051617460372,0.0,0.08505645316557961,0.0,0.0,0.10046692048866973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325814858758285,0.12490192074969175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699963894389078,0.0,0.0,0.07007168859808538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646990259324403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639256862593262,0.0,0.1080466376833004,0.0,0.10843410736035937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748468584459321,0.12203776321448816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738509304095323
mentalhealth,craigandthesoph,2020/02/23,"Starting my journey... Hi everyone! I’m starting a journey to take back control of my mental and physical health. I am sharing my story and experiences in the hopes of reaching others and creating a community where we can grow together. The Instagram is @helloitscraig where you will see a link to my YouTube channel in the description. 

I hope to connect with you! Have a great day/night!",4.495857142857143,7.363806014285713,5.335714285714285,74.61928571428574,74.57142857142857,8.571428571428571,37.14285714285714,9.23628265651192,4.239857142857144,311,19,49,8,7,101,50,70,0.0,0.762,0.23800000000000002,0.9475,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,2,0,1,3,4,0,0,7,0,5,1,0,1,0,9,12,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,4,8,11,0,10,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,2,3,36,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951409556890816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846355584942181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16366693806001814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424974177049957,0.0,0.2482452828925654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27979306001326504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697559970598061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5041210888663401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557502889664419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381550951105856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20222959634266133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.359253213291134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908107817077459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YuppersYuppers,2020/02/23,"Help. Upped medication dosage and started birth control. I’m feeling suicidal I take Zoloft and I got the dose a few weeks ago as well as started the ring birth control the next day. My past with taking the pill birth control is bad, I got extremely depressed and had suicidal thoughts. Normally my anxiety is worse than my depression and it’s manageable. Lately I’ve been feeling up and down from happy to extremely sad within hours. I’ve also lot my interest in sex and in any intimacy at all, I don’t want to kiss my boyfriend that much and want to be alone. Just a few hours ago I had a meltdown and was feeling extremely hopeless and like life was not even worth going forward. Has anyone else experienced this with medication or birth control? How do I manage it and how long will this last?",4.585392156862746,6.3972193856209145,5.270081699346407,79.98786764705883,70.83006535947713,8.76013071895425,31.70424836601307,9.2995712137729,2.963793464052288,638,29,118,14,12,206,96,153,0.2,0.6629999999999999,0.13699999999999998,-0.9446,0,1,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,4,6,10,0,0,7,0,12,8,0,6,1,30,26,16,2,3,3,0,3,1,0,1,6,1,0,0,5,12,0,4,4,0,1,2,2,5,1,0,8,5,11,5,16,16,5,26,0,4,0,2,1,8,0,2,19,74,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137803189600917,0.0,0.0,0.12488832957305708,0.0,0.0964307278229219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200103951019654,0.0,0.0922461875323946,0.0,0.0,0.08431491494563784,0.12355223327369096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068233861882554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.540979416217307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776649997120909,0.0,0.2077170991512153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073219428393022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964438544692977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18291219995461155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853048596741762,0.0,0.1928835738353934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283635729224455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082470099832585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375012762738476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829179583009058,0.1360236468114341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517182146865873,0.058911096653828536,0.0,0.0,0.10671276501126364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251593527269667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429507493868667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864288162734606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824211498691104,0.0,0.11814640711447287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511076986325434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17069950310194398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637979556123745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813278457588096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572997506673067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422467610357286,0.0,0.09672495710075857,0.0,0.10841921264028688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12288507484840272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,simonsaystorontorpy,2020/02/23,"Anything I can do So this is going to be a long one. My friend lives with her grandparents, parents still in the picture but the mother is showing sign of severe paranoia buying emf intermitters and constantly think she’s being followed so she went and lived with her grandparents. Recently the parents moved back in and started really messing with her head mainly just the mom but some of that paranoia rubbed off onto the dad made him all delusional aswell. So she slept over at my place once because her mother struck her because she came into her room and started saying all these paranoia conspiracy stuff she didn’t want to listen got smacked on her ear. She slept over for a day went back to her house called me again today to come pick her up but didn’t want to tell me what happened, seen her face has a cut through the side of her sunglasses. Grandparents don’t really care or just tells her to ignore it. She lives with younger brother but younger brother just keeps saying agree with whatever she says. She has multiple older brother but they’ve since moved out and don’t want to include her into their picture she’s basically by herself doing a non paid internship atm. Can’t really leave the house on her home and doesn’t want to talk to a social worker because she doesn’t want to cause any trouble to the household. What’re some options for here
Canada",6.784961538461541,7.458266303846155,6.178269230769235,79.71048076923078,64.80769230769229,8.961538461538463,32.403846153846146,8.841846274778883,2.6251153846153845,1109,42,199,16,16,340,148,260,0.10800000000000001,0.8290000000000001,0.064,-0.9306,6,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,1,11,6,1,0,13,0,16,5,5,3,2,42,40,15,0,5,9,9,1,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,6,16,0,2,1,1,3,8,7,4,0,1,11,7,33,2,36,27,5,36,0,0,1,0,47,16,0,4,12,133,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751343883869061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092070878483234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16991409882104305,0.0,0.20205404211337707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281873875273092,0.12636675144796994,0.11264801991138686,0.11349973753135277,0.0,0.09517405747708192,0.0,0.1193963052823508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125444320252304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536134547581169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279183995440832,0.0,0.08836588802146146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097702560517432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339069180005353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082664298252973,0.0,0.0,0.25497242580555063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820518972860058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698890739985547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926839527263785,0.09777678892960792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454469113968394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940007394693254,0.0,0.2348586395876889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766417152135275,0.07486829223689301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453636464979154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11543453809697456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21234082044539368,0.0,0.10909176961137644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26358912514728644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12481793019795548,0.0,0.09139530648881232,0.0,0.0,0.11262674254153288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564053680309571,0.0,0.08823440284445773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12648023789104926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880460309668914,0.19313957533310147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079508032051142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472797600297754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3258380459039451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20484358406172046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Trex490,2020/02/23,I think out loud I swear I think out loud am I going crazy I bit my tongue and think but I think people still hear me?,-2.8555555555555543,-1.4626543333333313,-0.8099259259259242,110.48733333333335,110.85185185185185,2.16,5.4,3.1291,-2.9998977777777776,91,0,25,0,5,29,17,27,0.128,0.872,0.0,-0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,7,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,2,7,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,14,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3373567680992906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17561640105283444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3482745405734047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21422728040360212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467742351210044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7919995481681509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,waterbark,2020/02/23,"Why Do I Cry When I Look at Myself? Serious question.

Anytime I look at myself I want to sob. I hate how I look. No matter how many times my partner tells me I’m beautiful I can’t believe it. It feel like anytime someone compliments me I’m being lied to, and I want to runaway and cry. When I look at my reflection, or a picture of myself I’m disgusted. I want to vomit when I see myself. I feel disgusting and It feels like the people around me are constantly judging me and making fun of me behind my back. What’s wrong with me? It feels like I’m going crazy. Why can’t I look at myself?",-0.005893333333332862,2.1924964640000013,2.764,90.08866666666668,88.36,5.573333333333334,21.133333333333333,7.0316486544052195,0.7245733333333337,458,16,97,7,15,160,64,125,0.226,0.609,0.16399999999999998,-0.887,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,7,11,3,0,2,0,5,1,0,3,0,20,25,10,0,3,1,0,4,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,0,10,27,5,13,24,0,12,0,1,6,0,3,5,1,2,9,64,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238609321842616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698733566097976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567591243176948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503570648763808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056696967945692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28140626300618604,0.29819730629528696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907444649485226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373684311520426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20392511279670586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5841978451390294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287465557131153,0.14106251404843725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964596900998783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558646581189665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087373036631754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178898559493472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216113831574672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113157834426478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461988355065857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510979955672936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15212385752573734,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Coheedgirl88,2020/02/23,"First time visiting a psychiatrist - prescribed 3 meds , concerned about my mental health in the long term After an initial 20 min psychiatry session my dr prescribed me adderall , klonopin , and on my
Second visit increased my doses and added Wellbutrin .  
I am puzzled why she prescribed me adderall but it does help getting through the day and functioning .  I never thought or suspected I had Add or adhd .
Klonopin I read shouldn’t be used long term ... but she says it’s safe ... adderall and klonopin and supposed to be a good combination.  Wellbutrin treats depression but can cause anxiety so it puzzles me why she put me on that one when I had social and generalized anxiety

I just want to have a healthy mind for all of my life . A health , fit life and be on as minimal meds as possible

I am taking less adderall and klonopin as prescribed and don’t want to have to rely on taking klonopin daily.

Should I go see a second opinion from another psychiatrist . I’m just lost and idk what to do . I meet with a counselor on Monday",4.685713350785342,6.871666089005238,5.004892015706808,80.4419977094241,71.35602094240838,7.706937172774869,33.927028795811516,8.472884824447931,2.9430965968586387,817,42,143,14,16,258,112,191,0.076,0.8,0.124,0.8573,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,9,0,14,6,0,2,2,35,25,20,0,4,7,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,5,12,0,1,2,1,0,5,3,2,0,4,4,2,21,3,21,16,5,24,0,2,1,0,9,7,0,5,12,96,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18239725242713026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914338512976345,0.23220625810464446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15590891811375387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787866819898612,0.0,0.13071870943532707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328143714611606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290949223646213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929321566664063,0.0,0.08625401297478318,0.12729692104632045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226474209619671,0.0,0.0,0.10172778888372544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21439834521344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686221785216201,0.0,0.0,0.16567416198568966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371630437338137,0.0,0.15294779735148187,0.0,0.1532437679840925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705387064908775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10284283204138632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710971261493103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15257010483626965,0.0,0.0,0.15181041010627006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069307008136508,0.0,0.0,0.12094051367405442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15470972851788412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22822331025356946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048790249944,0.08849792216536621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107998000689675,0.0,0.0,0.17903497689816472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27389644477642144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Arthurmorgan1890,2020/02/23,"I sometimes get excited for things but don’t know if i’ll be there to actually see it happen For Instance, if there is a game that is announced for a release a couple years later, I ask myself if I will actually be able to play it. In my family I have a brother who constantly finds a way to argue with our family and sometimes has breakdowns, so some days  he’s a chill guy and the next he’s constantly yelling at you and other family members. I always feel like something will go wrong at some point, our family will break apart, and we will all go our separate ways, and I hate that thought. I love my family, and can’t see them go. And even though my brother yells and all that, I still have days where he’s nice and we just chill for awhile, and for that I still sort of like him for that. But on all those night whenever he yells at our family and has a breakdown, I always ask myself: “Is this the end?” I don’t know why, it’s very unreasonable, but I always have that thought in my mind that our family will fall apart someday.",6.179901372212694,5.101740240566041,6.787684391080622,80.72506861063466,66.40566037735849,10.539279588336193,30.12178387650085,9.800150414767053,2.4243339622641518,809,23,175,15,11,267,105,212,0.059000000000000004,0.8420000000000001,0.099,0.8176,0,0,1,0,1,0,20.0,7,1,1,0,9,9,2,0,9,0,18,1,0,0,3,34,34,19,0,3,7,2,1,2,0,5,0,3,0,1,15,14,0,0,6,2,0,4,3,3,0,0,2,6,28,6,17,25,5,28,0,0,2,1,23,10,0,6,13,118,43,0,0.09978431499158168,0.0,0.1947501947425964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490856308834209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18656972924948192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156627909571184,0.0,0.0,0.11040944661018116,0.0,0.12870525643830905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837928552872462,0.0,0.0,0.06590659896365174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6584744011821468,0.0,0.05045394784294272,0.07128593456783483,0.0,0.0,0.0912010561570192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05213318613737961,0.0,0.17012917722047172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880215990932076,0.08823894020429475,0.0,0.0,0.09851635264364628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967769986818426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749915200889976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900592401196663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075371283080893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612175102191937,0.09364082004472246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432843080796936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15903035985895478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681884070107302,0.19737847801000388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15937576569786294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629226501192761,0.0,0.0980375828465895,0.15843520017434234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233251012691371,0.0,0.1584082893255313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003982382255082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909848403910016,0.0,0.06425782729730252
mentalhealth,dessss9797,2020/02/23,Please help. Miserable after move My husband and I are expecting our first baby. We were renting off his mom and knew we needed more space and privacy so we moved into my old childhood home. My parents split and basically gave it to us. I thought I’d be happy but I’m absolutely miserable. We haven’t been here too long but I cry everyday all day. I have no clue why. I seriously think it’s just the house. I remember hating living here as a kid and suffering from depression. When I moved out things got better and now I’m back to where I started. I have chest pains and constant anxiety too. I’m sure pregnancy hormones aren’t helping. My husband refuses to leave mainly because we don’t know where’d we go and I understand but wow I just can’t stand it here. I haven’t had issues with anxiety or depression until I set foot back in this home and I have no clue why. Sorry for the rant I’m just so confused and clueless as to what to do.,0.4013368055555517,2.8535315989583374,2.732291666666665,88.13909722222225,92.38541666666666,6.386111111111113,22.73611111111111,7.662118739084242,1.4821027777777782,745,30,151,17,27,253,116,192,0.267,0.638,0.094,-0.9898,3,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,8,0,0,2,15,13,1,3,3,0,14,3,2,0,2,38,29,20,0,2,7,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,6,19,0,1,6,0,1,4,7,9,0,1,7,0,27,4,16,21,3,26,0,5,0,0,18,6,0,2,14,101,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20706821393753208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081349603272541,0.0,0.08250151170704541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969651193160065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14625358010659195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486637409524374,0.08728257873831609,0.0,0.233134885441324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151194426052027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691637838453175,0.0,0.10824311063792484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407108028370655,0.0,0.1336194269695943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18143000730389047,0.0,0.27151247719197336,0.0,0.0,0.1561632498356567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125894812113776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437887728517675,0.0,0.0,0.14330465670210854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950698090350645,0.11977092087116373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158507619109669,0.0,0.4315324093668675,0.0,0.10035229165717027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14201570936785146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14401043619080184,0.0,0.15027814991203484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485617848031168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533129151157756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150113851790936,0.09579377254732332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755558127740474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991334154900361,0.08671988573116313,0.0,0.1074441962731044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408928657798818,0.16279637706973105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244245129681796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Suskaw,2020/02/23,"I get bored with everything and everywhere and it eventually always leads to me being depressed. I dont know whats wrong with me. I get bored living in places for too long. I get bored with my hobbies. I get bored of my lovelife.
I try to be contented for a period of time but it makes me a lot more depressed and makes me want to give up on life because there is no point to life unless youre  doing something greater everyday.
I feel like my ambitious trait is making me depressed.",2.5075486827033235,4.609686329896912,3.6978694158075602,87.74710194730815,77.45360824742268,7.197709049255441,25.21076746849943,8.167268648758528,1.5659104238258887,382,14,78,7,9,124,63,97,0.188,0.6659999999999999,0.146,-0.5382,0,0,1,0,0,1,7.0,0,1,0,2,2,9,0,0,2,0,6,2,0,4,0,16,17,5,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,8,0,0,0,1,16,1,15,15,3,10,0,3,0,0,2,5,0,1,5,52,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15260545097619366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118003730064335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4738925374914007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21494619353059136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16483021034648265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273374104472408,0.13102267867963088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3832806422323513,0.17593625021223425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007931376313481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590850136297736,0.08960112638379178,0.0,0.16194763908482127,0.16230531237134446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592212324101348,0.0,0.0,0.3672674872561148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916164252209141,0.0,0.17337450585494582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119209270014832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694338777472633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245181598391044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081754604581702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20052168363013467,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CjBurden,2020/02/23,"Mother in law (possibly bipolar) is in hospital and isnt getting help. Throw away account because my wife is a very private person.  

My mother in law (60) has always suffered from depression/anxiety.  Nothing specifically diagnosed, but my wife goes through it as well and she has been diagnosed and treated in the past.

So she had been going through depression for an extended period of time (months) leading up to christmas.  Within days after xmas her mood flipped 180 degrees.  Suddenly she was outgoing, everything was great and wonderful, and she was no longer being nasty with everyone.  This is a version of something she has done in the past, but multiplied by 100.

Within days we started to realize that she was off.  She began talking constantly (and I mean non-stop from morning until night) bouncing from topic to topic, making some strange statements which we knew weren't true but we would pass off to her being an exaggerator.   We all had a trip to Disney coming up at the end of January and were doing our best to get through the trip without incident.   She had really begun some strange activity shortly before.  LOTS of spending (money she really doesnt have to spend).

While in Disney, it became impossible to ignore that something was incredibly wrong with her.  Her behavior was erratic, she stopped sleeping and was going out spending money at night in Disney springs while we all slept because we had walked 10 miles during the day.  She would then go for a walk at 5am!  We all got sick before during and after the trip so there was a lot of medication flying around, but she was a nurse and tends to over meditate,  this didn't seem off at first.

However, we started noticing that she was taking too much.  Fioricet for what she was claiming were migraines. Benadryl because she always takes it.  Cough medicine with codeine (she really did have a bag cough).  Anti biotic for her sinus infection.  Not to mention her insulin for her diabetes. There was also some xanax mixed in, because why not!    We realized at some point that in a 1 month window she had taken over 100 doses of the fioricet. 

After the trip, she immediately started to spiral out of control.  Mood was no longer happy and upbeat.  She was still in a manic state, but it seemed to have intensified.  There is a lot more, but I feel like this is already too long.

Eventually my wife and brother in law got her to a hospital.   She was combative and agitated and wound up needing sedation.   They did not have any type of psychiatric facilities in that hospital,  so she was transferred to Hackensack medical hospital in NJ.  While there, they have tried to discharge her multiple times.  

The psychiatrist tried to tell us that she was just upset because she had fought with her family.  Said her behavior was fine.  Hes discharging her the next day.  Moments later she bursts in the room screaming and cursing him, saying hes not her dr and she wants a new psychiatrist blah blah.  Fast forward and his new diagnosis is that shes in a manic state induced by medication.   Our point was that we think she was taking all of this medication because she was already in this state.   He disagrees (based on what we dont know). We brought up that the nurses had documented that they think this is bipolar disorder.  He says that never happened.   Later we find out that it in fact was documented. 

He had a resident with him.  The resident corrected him a number of times on inaccuracies in what he was saying.  At one point he said her MRI was clear, the resident said it was inconclusive,  and showed a number mini strokes.  The doctor said that this was all over her brain and not isolated to one section so it wouldn't be relevant (who knows, already don't trust the guy).  Finally we got them to commit to observing her over the weekend.  What else can we do as far as getting her the right diagnosis,  getting her help while shes there, getting this incompetent psychiatrist removed from her case, and getting someone important at the hospital to take notice and step in.

This woman really needs help, and we are really concerned that after this weekend we may never have an opportunity like this to help her again.  Shes saying shes moving out, emptying her retirement account and separating from her husband (for no actual reason).",5.868352490421457,7.659615892720307,6.387899106002557,73.30951149425292,67.59514687100894,9.640102171136654,33.04022988505747,9.963021489967124,3.5914337164750947,3416,153,569,83,58,1109,340,783,0.11,0.831,0.059000000000000004,-0.9905,2,0,2,1,0,0,96.0,20,0,4,5,17,20,1,1,38,0,80,26,3,5,12,114,125,43,0,6,13,7,2,4,0,4,23,9,2,3,38,51,0,3,16,3,7,18,18,7,1,3,56,11,89,11,108,62,17,127,0,2,0,0,115,57,0,11,53,426,127,4,0.0,0.0,0.06324020864087472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145413692340288,0.051824434187044986,0.10784569287050932,0.0,0.0,0.04406953645698088,0.0,0.04957555109982306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057690077138197585,0.0,0.0,0.060886312207578425,0.0,0.0,0.2370266975314228,0.0,0.1102883490465881,0.0,0.06800871693969235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723436714508111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055823660587300435,0.0,0.07003104625506415,0.07268417646858104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671751297829267,0.0,0.055816342868705515,0.13155116560746444,0.0,0.0,0.07427199983807044,0.06633053438077614,0.0,0.0663178856978525,0.07595082948511922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054136156503666544,0.0,0.05739788310615245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061923834094689024,0.05824244195438764,0.0,0.06109226755914205,0.0,0.032767291376121284,0.04629661481148275,0.0,0.07099057164157113,0.059230480639684065,0.055122992572670615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031472311161905,0.0,0.11049030967638604,0.0,0.15549113291486966,0.0714476021768782,0.0,0.06416701369765432,0.05730673590488317,0.06898599323183721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17374936359568413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123012772421264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633207758636717,0.0,0.0,0.05735027404749352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528435885351753,0.0,0.0,0.04325775649840703,0.0,0.0,0.07059150579865649,0.0,0.26113637025355035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10345326403019683,0.06887732502891,0.04763903880806796,0.09610398560805178,0.09996302758008847,0.12517790193598366,0.06892071851154102,0.12162996817041136,0.0,0.06218202423525766,0.14756155675440488,0.0,0.0,0.08782691933859282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372716978664712,0.0,0.05658511618626349,0.0,0.0,0.1837846576619891,0.07305775813006264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075783079898452,0.0666302035318708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055343008161456736,0.24657710070955674,0.2061417469814028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799184646467448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06485167513303677,0.0,0.054908959294858437,0.09977991590523247,0.0,0.0,0.1376076697333372,0.0,0.0517532559510582,0.10835955258105356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949008002109536,0.05208770281810519,0.0566423161162729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304869288596972,0.0,0.0,0.11336472922861827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799651085139756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795228400165052,0.0,0.0,0.05347080782368145,0.038223593620249116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058267364324011514,0.0,0.05847631887661756,0.0,0.0,0.06246958580305668,0.07027812127583064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920710460497594,0.07085395629159567,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JohnTheNarnian,2020/02/23,"I feel like I'm losing my mind I can't seem to control my emotions anymore. Normally I'm a pretty flatline kinda guy. I dont speak much and am very quiet and have anxiety issues. I feel like a fool writing something like this out to complain but the last few days I've had almost like an episode of euphoria. Like I was very unusually happy and energetic and even had a confidence boost. But after a day or two it slowly faded away and my emotions since have been all over the place. I don't know what or why is happening but I literally feel like im going crazy. I am more depressed than i have ever been and literally nothing has changed and I don't know where to turn. I dont know what to feel and I dont have any friends to talk about it with but i have to get these thoughts out somehow

If you took the time to read thank you",2.1129333333333307,3.771383188571433,3.7942857142857136,88.63904761904762,77.11428571428571,6.723809523809526,25.380952380952376,7.554174236665415,1.1774952380952382,658,24,143,9,15,220,102,175,0.095,0.6709999999999999,0.233,0.9823,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,2,5,13,0,0,8,0,20,0,0,1,2,36,37,15,0,2,7,0,4,6,1,0,0,2,0,1,6,11,0,1,9,1,0,2,6,4,0,1,7,6,18,9,16,30,4,15,0,2,0,0,8,6,0,7,13,92,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665857682108155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922443991815016,0.0,0.08912268168173484,0.0,0.11553734442999446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945619970465856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12324224483955658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13066539007634975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502665683609482,0.0,0.10034184285939217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4096136976492529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620951111107892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694758343732559,0.10538151162461393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356249251173436,0.24968427218151856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900081165385444,0.0,0.0608667834972344,0.0,0.06621000661110152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153539639877846,0.10302114386961148,0.1240171128490246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12584069828283956,0.1215964152942836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19207713858385053,0.09496358240946194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34149801016485115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303344324755528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176324502641192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564138566541134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414590580674253,0.1117855198641366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171838786854285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11852304818901402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653218105583962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605782023821864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637054514155996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968789540580663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09363881297947607,0.0,0.10725815014522568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924885062840838,0.06793246840991256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943651356922706,0.0,0.12671925789973876,0.11380421106763199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19225048150608204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512372001002344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cheesygurl,2020/02/23,"I don’t trust my family anymore I moved in with my family after graduation. We struggle with mental health. My parents always look down on me for not getting “help” but I can’t make them understand that medicine works for me, but therapy doesn’t. The truth is that mental health is a chronic struggle and the treatment is nearly the same for everyone. Pills and therapy. Therapy works for my mom, but not for me. I have tried numerous times in numerous points of my life with many different counselors- I’ve tried to use it but I just hate it. 

This past weekend my brother and I got into it, which led to him and my dad getting into it. I was mad at my brother but I thought my dad was going to hit my brother and I shielded him. I couldn’t calm down after that-it gave me flashbacks. I had a breakdown. I don’t think he was going to hit him, this time, but he has before. I believe I have CTPSD. My brother is not right in the head either-he gets extremely angry like my dad. 

I honestly don’t remember a lot of parts of my childhood Bc I was truly so depressed and constantly belittled. I used to pray to die.

I’m a bit of the black sheep- Bc i always stood up for myself and talked back, because my bipolar mother constantly disrespected me. Then my dad would come home and yell at me more and or put his hands on me. It just made things worse. 

But when they ask me why I’m so upset-they act like I’m making up the mistreatment. I have been so irritated lately and I just can’t stand it anymore. I don’t feel comfortable anymore. They have always taken care of me but I just don’t trust them. I’m the enemy.",0.8691949185566195,3.2640832127659607,2.8355623100303973,89.75827838827841,86.17325227963526,6.04913101083314,22.11370898604941,7.419758726546812,1.0092814433793158,1263,45,261,22,39,422,158,329,0.152,0.737,0.111,-0.9552,2,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,1,0,4,2,9,14,2,2,11,0,25,8,2,6,1,49,54,24,1,2,16,11,2,2,0,1,6,1,1,0,12,17,0,0,5,1,0,7,12,5,0,0,12,5,56,9,36,38,5,37,1,1,2,0,26,16,0,2,15,176,68,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518260302805422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30014388262050323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431116945762724,0.0,0.0,0.0775721275928794,0.0,0.06149680748185524,0.0,0.08584325866385413,0.1136596095023169,0.0,0.0,0.11013715303934704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285605060772174,0.0,0.0,0.08690101858963459,0.0,0.2180354777324426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688962705434361,0.0,0.104699719258634,0.10540034970629096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639719432924863,0.0,0.0,0.19020537968976173,0.0,0.051009033930248575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581202407897717,0.0,0.11466727374672192,0.0,0.08068465169189334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996002134526128,0.10353416547761224,0.21446596434844145,0.0,0.0,0.06761916236285237,0.0,0.10119299751795034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379943192267633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125602883143857,0.09857182174274752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471557778803179,0.0,0.0,0.0857663757039785,0.0,0.09545710657933204,0.13467920455467727,0.10227864139931707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20333090998314335,0.0,0.0,0.11815192637206096,0.0,0.10722173429277553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201766201188984,0.10924551125801224,0.09630340404547312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953662167854292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141440017371303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11427978264005212,0.0861527841500805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109278033103645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081085231302751,0.0,0.0,0.3461025081587766,0.0,0.06702160167590207,0.06464119271650147,0.0,0.08008913917495535,0.11765035755401787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698468256773413,0.0,0.0,0.10502185066861433,0.0,0.17425953218617135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103042724694388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688677804174607,0.0,0.10280750470475017,0.07166376765838102,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lostaftersummer,2020/02/23,"Trying to find people who had similar symptoms to mine : I am loosing my hope at this point Hello and thank you for reading this: I went through a severe health scare in September-October this year: the scare was resolved but my mental symptoms was only getting worse, I started to have constant muscle twitches, hand tremmors and headaches (They are constant since November ), muscle tension and total anhedonia including food and my hobbies. I also have a pretty severe emotional numbing : I can’t feel fear, irritation or anger anymore. I can feel sadness if I try hard enough but it’s mostly just this numb despare.

I have been like this for 4 months and honestly don’t want to live anymore: I am a 30 years old woman working in computer science research, but after this happend to me I can enjoy my work or even my hobbies anymore. Sometimes I think about my situation as it’s produces this numb despare but I don’t do much rumination and my mind is mostly blank. I have been on Cymbalta, Buspar, Wellbutrin and. Celexa since then and they didn’t help, except made my tremmors worse.

I would appreciate any kind of input from this community: I don’t know how to deal with this anymore",5.8050454545454535,7.46438609545455,6.185227272727275,75.20784090909092,67.5909090909091,8.227272727272727,35.11363636363636,8.660442795831766,3.210318181818182,951,47,155,15,16,306,138,220,0.19699999999999998,0.662,0.141,-0.9446,0,0,0,0,0,1,24.0,0,1,2,4,5,16,1,4,4,0,22,9,1,3,1,34,33,19,0,4,9,0,4,1,0,1,7,0,0,1,12,9,1,0,6,1,0,1,5,9,0,0,8,4,28,7,20,24,5,15,0,1,0,0,8,5,0,6,10,111,40,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123286914880388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758097731500636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.452562371233928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465683756925318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761551152168262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832905408020326,0.0,0.11787918532258378,0.0,0.07535135283080842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283761265735321,0.11536851500158594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427063555229096,0.0,0.1379507282151989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059604139260750026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219678344161157,0.0,0.0,0.12126587154687456,0.0,0.0,0.07646804640645538,0.0,0.0,0.11331107347537996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880084637725173,0.0626975385651212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05573564043093025,0.0,0.10073819096879626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794896299609244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496975795872558,0.0,0.11519223695210355,0.0,0.0910606960629682,0.0,0.08386480744323732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971188245830687,0.0,0.0,0.08676596154292679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079091425225966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784617904055127,0.0,0.0,0.11606435996716608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411479215632934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284358108952122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25776471251295113,0.0,0.1887427941222795,0.12823510536538174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128319134320848,0.0,0.08074918535751031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23715374847554505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503314535089482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731003690623882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549109852522756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728965149078231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057569362671918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16610890415231613,0.0,0.2325225207171021,0.0810419431337563,0.0,0.0,0.14693260744620024
mentalhealth,RegularlyAlive,2020/02/23,"Was this a suicide attempt, or me being an idiot? I was on the highway. I hardly ever take the highway, due to fear, but got tired of taking the usual night-drive routes. 


I was getting ready to merge onto a...well, merging lane, to go from one part of the highway to the next. This semi came flying in, going to merge as well. I thought ""fuck it let's see what happens"" and *floored* it. I ended up going 85mph, the semi was going 70 or so, and we almost collided. We were so, so close to hitting. If we hit, I very well could have died. I just felt numb as always and smiled like an idiot the whole way home. If we ended up crashing this damn hell that I'm living would have been all over - and to anyone else it would have looked like a simple car accident made by yet another dumbass.",2.3443573817486865,3.7591699813664623,3.898385093167701,89.17144768275203,75.8944099378882,5.9476349737219305,22.322503583373145,6.297961479604792,0.4062666985188721,601,16,126,4,13,200,105,161,0.243,0.657,0.10099999999999999,-0.9847,0,0,0,0,0,1,30.0,4,0,0,1,8,11,5,1,11,0,14,3,0,1,2,25,33,14,2,5,6,0,2,2,0,2,2,0,1,0,8,10,0,0,2,0,0,6,0,7,2,1,11,4,12,4,19,15,3,22,1,0,2,1,4,8,3,5,9,85,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463515824967652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216113902616764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15325465049007087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219390035331496,0.1497514956131061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16716062723158662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669164848798305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168422110532126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220924652733142,0.0,0.2588971771361358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220417574455132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16446328022203566,0.0,0.0,0.14033024548356104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135116522497768,0.07635915274339672,0.0,0.3322495270799468,0.0,0.11689227663358548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12924302564627138,0.0,0.13092479638978108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466038411421741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945181926768794,0.0,0.14280640014942772,0.0,0.1290561864777273,0.0,0.12273210017423412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13829394159774303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543586717155056,0.13715512537387547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903736977229867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826995909597616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646538835462054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598681680853308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21977843199752592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602952501467165,0.0,0.1679819069682615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609673923275079,0.12059191433190733,0.0,0.11600981693842438,0.0,0.0,0.2628190331471021,0.0,0.0,0.16317512325415462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076464551329316,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MWolfe312,2020/02/23,"Today I’m Not Okay... I’m sad. I’m down. My head hurts. I feel like crying. 

I usually am strong enough to deal with my depressing feelings. I’m usually able to control my anxiety. But today is not going great. I’m new to reddit and just thought I would leave this here. 

I’m going to be okay, but I’m just uncomfortable.

Any thoughts?",-1.164849498327758,0.6103107536231924,1.5292753623188418,93.55204013377927,108.13043478260867,5.021627647714603,18.351170568561876,6.67199483983844,0.4524461538461533,258,9,56,5,13,88,42,69,0.201,0.695,0.10300000000000001,-0.6975,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,3,8,0,0,0,2,4,1,1,1,0,14,17,3,0,1,6,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,4,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,2,2,6,5,6,13,1,8,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,26,7,0,0.1910801613394388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12994106212874926,0.0,0.1461758004152698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21431264881808795,0.0,0.0,0.20989258479823114,0.0,0.1969952560392328,0.16457706296915545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19743688561042916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19323174177934616,0.1365077054405166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171905182664983,0.0,0.0,0.21066655244895946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19610337216214527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045552647277663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023263010612109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335211499868876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18454641051748047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30339260848474714,0.0,0.0,0.3622433010659245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4208956042270711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357378642578799,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gdet5,2020/02/23,"Am I normal? Why do I act like a baby? I'm not very sure where to put this and I've tried looking my problem up but I just can't find any results. If this doesn't fit then I'm really sorry.

I'm 15, I'm going to be 16 in a few days. I've always had this problem where sometimes I'll start acting like a toddler. And no, I don't mean the normal 'oh I'm a little grumpy and childish right now', I mean full on toddler. I'll talk in a baby-ish voice, have the urge to cry about everything, behave like a toddler, giggle at baby-ish jokes, etc. I've realised that often what triggers it is crying, if someone has upset me then I'll cry and afterwards I might start acting like a baby. It usually doesn't go away until I sleep. I'm really not sure why this happens and it's making me so upset because I can't find any information on it. I don't know what to do, I don't know where to go, I don't know who to talk to, I feel so lost and alone and I'm scared of judgement. I know this hasn't happened because of abuse because I've never been physically abused, so I don't really know what's the cause. I'm just scared of people finding this out and I'm worried if I'll ever be normal.",1.0499791013584099,2.3635761034482776,3.6398833159178,90.0968573667712,79.15325670498085,5.97150818530129,21.442180424939046,6.574015621080383,0.3255348659003832,917,25,209,8,22,323,120,261,0.23399999999999999,0.687,0.08,-0.9912,0,1,0,0,2,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,12,15,0,4,10,0,21,1,1,4,4,44,48,18,0,8,8,0,1,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,15,9,0,0,12,1,0,7,14,7,0,0,3,3,17,8,20,42,3,33,0,1,1,0,4,15,0,5,15,115,32,0,0.0,0.2316870161447317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10126202217492894,0.0,0.0,0.08135390872215631,0.0,0.0,0.13297625341992134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185975543244992,0.0,0.0,0.1788022108480377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043849550849597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32219295144098303,0.06305467509631951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904131976174164,0.0,0.08844012409583878,0.0,0.0,0.08787092336087958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049436322596323655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680847600274246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666977758469854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17291842957765274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26866391948081897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19106530757846996,0.09799295544025262,0.0,0.0,0.08210362576538767,0.0,0.10672938902912944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526338660408386,0.0,0.0,0.21300414569913265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372035100785494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540758286105588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28738659900440244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778260450037198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18710867567306255,0.0,0.0982875897974472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18790521462381068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349652015834724,0.0,0.0,0.19577310915050355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784233600477386,0.0,0.08284166652563718,0.0,0.09669873745904294,0.1094474430528675,0.13840666239551885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18429739016494376,0.0,0.0,0.1571704203597249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638058434348883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076817435807438,0.08067191379095451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644755137353996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992919341454933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dothostas,2020/02/23,"Tips for depressed GF Hi guys 

Never thought I’d post something here, but here I am. 
I need advice. My GF is most probably depressed, she’s had the toughest childhood I could ever think of, and she’s struggled a lot after that. I love her and she loves me but she recently told me that she felt empty, that she was not feeling well and that she thought she was depressed. Now imagine you have one of the most easy going / funniest person telling you that.... she’s really not well. So anyway, here I am, asking you what can someone who loves someone who’s depressed do to help her recover ? 
Thanks for the tips",2.858670741023684,5.033051857142858,3.5030404889228417,89.21588999236059,76.64705882352942,6.007944996180291,26.784568372803673,6.980632752743323,1.2621193277310918,477,19,93,5,11,150,72,119,0.18600000000000005,0.598,0.21600000000000005,0.8919,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,3,0,0,9,11,0,1,4,0,10,3,0,0,2,20,23,6,0,2,4,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,8,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,5,2,1,7,2,22,6,6,15,3,8,0,4,0,3,28,0,0,3,6,71,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532148650525242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902740684247142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873593558692375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5123482022477621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452022230317462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519420821144927,0.0,0.14278865029787616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451752751229022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725012613659244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967978183529064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264312263009157,0.402660260045656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026946079876712,0.11469731542689655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007723766897764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298512275347735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14242679276364273,0.0,0.16033871981401865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526992226488018,0.0,0.14683701968581395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25200958300144466,0.1144872135718634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155468041027707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998248963384168,0.13691576424486404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528985220162436,0.0,0.2361244251295697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14210248936109848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674232834579032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Donnimation,2020/02/23,"“Why do I need to be needed?” I’m not sure if this belongs here, but here it goes. I watched a show with this line, and I’ve never been hit harder by anything, and I’ve watched some very uncomfortable movies/shows. It’s a question I’ve asked myself, but not one I’ve seen someone else ask.

In a way, I’m just like the character that says this line. Clinging on to past times out of fear of moving on. Constant attempts to brush off trauma. Feeling weight on shoulders that cannot be lifted.

I’ve been told that I’ve changed other’s lives for the better. I’ve been told I’ve saved lives. I’ve been called a hero. Yet, I don’t feel like I’m enough, and that I need to be needed by others more. Otherwise what am I worth? Maybe I need to be lighter on myself.",1.6524107142857147,3.2922595625,2.7321428571428577,95.83,78.375,5.321428571428573,21.42857142857143,5.773587663045528,-0.08383035714285736,590,16,136,3,14,188,91,160,0.084,0.769,0.147,0.8776,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,4,8,0,1,6,0,12,2,1,0,2,23,28,6,0,6,6,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,12,5,1,0,3,1,1,1,5,2,0,1,7,8,8,6,18,16,3,14,0,0,3,0,7,7,0,3,7,73,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150899455403735,0.0,0.2760784182316799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13059047191819065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15077413821245786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15620135350950845,0.0,0.0,0.15956458327506529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233483392659811,0.0,0.0,0.15256898237637198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16615499113898025,0.1493194653822652,0.10548607288451388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14427534291778418,0.0,0.2607673821376727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834113782809955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569358484994004,0.0,0.5474283633707939,0.11388205440081685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005609321866968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14095515733767836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16540944877123795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742264221242768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251091576733089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916482014391687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609988828655651,0.0,0.0,0.2821848682975751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12183235327788428,0.0,0.11720312327113595,0.0,0.1798062468265109,0.0,0.0,0.13323732761357365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lillis717715,2020/02/23,"Im having a lot of weird memory lapses So like i swear to God im listening to people and retaining things but later theyre saying they said something i dont even begin to remember. Ive got really bad anxiety problems and depression so im wondering if that could be a contributing factor. Like sometimes my girlfriend swears she said stuff i genuinely dont remember her saying. Ive got an above average IQ, 4.0 gpa (highest on the scale in my college) so its nothing intellectual. I admit ive never had an eye for finer details and im a little spacey but im genuinely confused as to whether or not i just dont understand social cues or if im just having full blown memory lapses",1.942287104622871,4.436198167883216,4.767620437956206,77.1486082725061,81.91970802919708,8.324866180048662,25.921654501216544,9.029198982220553,2.774137128953772,547,23,97,16,15,195,88,137,0.20199999999999999,0.741,0.057999999999999996,-0.9684,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,6,7,0,1,6,0,11,1,1,0,1,24,20,14,0,4,10,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,4,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,5,6,13,2,9,13,2,7,0,1,1,0,11,4,0,7,5,60,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350274384532506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09113928452038897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715082983358967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401444215039673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3837840942947284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209538837968572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17460133680095513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.707432276211389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665455874378148,0.1094012885430478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279908592573244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841865284484259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473649866333098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567385063374071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444592738453026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992704224314271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473010963035548,0.0,0.20766147850998395,0.17360776745936488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112690668740445,0.0,0.0840323160701328,0.107956397793873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495556322206915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251726940484138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136334800704898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118373186553388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hefty-Muscle,2020/02/23,"Am I dramatic? (sorry if this is super choppy I just needed to rant)

So I have been on the fence about getting an assessment done for a few months now because I feel like maybe everything I'm feeling is normal and I'm just being super dramatic.

I don't really know how to explain everything but essentially I'm not happy. I have been pretty reckless about certain things like money and food. I will spend everything in my bank account and excessively binge eat, but then I end up hating myself and force myself to starve for a week. I'm scared everyone is going to leave me - I'm super paranoid if someone leaves me on read, or doesn't respond right away. I think they hate me and must think I'm a terrible person. My friendships have been strained these past few years and I do believe that is mostly on me. If I even get the slightest hint that a friend might be pushing away from me I start getting super clingy or I just drop them completely because I guess abandoning someone is better than being abandoned. There are even moments where I am like best friends with someone and then the next day I just have decided I hate them.

Whenever I'm walking somewhere I just assume that every stranger that I walk by must think I'm weird or ugly. In high school, if I walked by a group of people I would just assume they were shit-talking me, which doesn't make any sense cause I didn't even know them. Last night I was walking home from the grocery store and just kept thinking about how everyone I passed could have just stabbed me.

I don't feel motivated anymore. I use to be so good at school, I would get excited over homework. I use to love playing sports. Now, I can barely convince myself to go to class and just leaving my bed is becoming difficult. I procrastinate basically everything - I sometimes get in this mood where instead of doing something I should really be doing I decide to organize something such as my book collection, or I just write a to-do list. 

I just overall feel empty. The smallest things seem to be pushing me over the edge and I end up just raging. I get these weird moments of panic where I think I'm gonna die.

I have a bunch of pets living with me and they are the only things keeping me a bit happy at this point. I keep thinking about how if I didn't have them with me I would have probably just ended it all.

The thing is I really just want to pretend that everything is fine. When I am having a moment I think I'm being reasonable and that everyone else is just being irrational. And then after a few days I realize that I am the shitty person lol.

So, am I just dramatic? I feel like I might just be lazy and insecure but friends have expressed concern and I would rather have another opinion before I spend a bunch of money on a mental health assessment.

Thanks for any feedback, and sorry again if this doesn't make any sense.",4.845462039440727,5.940575499111901,5.4659325044405,81.58647174021952,69.31971580817051,8.40313339709432,29.53358837728287,8.69343788997812,2.2593925308557643,2278,85,432,37,39,736,252,563,0.17600000000000002,0.6779999999999999,0.146,-0.9624,0,0,2,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,7,7,43,38,4,4,22,1,64,4,0,10,4,107,115,40,1,18,32,0,5,4,3,11,1,0,4,2,19,19,2,6,23,5,7,9,8,14,0,0,9,5,77,23,48,85,9,55,0,2,0,1,18,21,0,18,28,308,96,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653622686734398,0.0701779015563633,0.0,0.0,0.06637275520467327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12575863820434333,0.0,0.0,0.08159511724627642,0.0739146723245543,0.05694922258806907,0.07540285051580829,0.07023486329079909,0.059190739193420334,0.07306601987483775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06875158963236004,0.0,0.0,0.07017079283477254,0.0,0.0,0.053435083332560855,0.0,0.0,0.08632365757125962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945877532814278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848868564678118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848215751566887,0.05590820886234358,0.0,0.1778301071339159,0.0,0.0,0.1326122686376434,0.0,0.056388166175041436,0.1918524073585742,0.3007445319117075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16919935662456778,0.09562410698013044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092736379446819,0.0,0.15512092773777456,0.0,0.20979690027092213,0.0,0.07607134442251529,0.05613447763683437,0.0,0.0,0.07372669732165332,0.0,0.0,0.14248825802476595,0.0,0.19822714610391656,0.0,0.07113936569597554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071114984237194,0.06713238324945177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897407079243195,0.0,0.0,0.07356172132070317,0.05455374311845208,0.0,0.2125953820167526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078694133271296,0.0,0.059097014811047385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060403461524077426,0.0,0.08934744693467636,0.0,0.06723631113255203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744581596679558,0.14199613351263682,0.0,0.0,0.05341981280569567,0.0,0.0,0.04962489070973035,0.0,0.0,0.07117671763833203,0.06280565617851906,0.06557341525464194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05090035134724024,0.0,0.07852341461150295,0.0,0.0,0.06388858109930662,0.04639816422208293,0.11687466191019065,0.0,0.0,0.06326684228475465,0.0,0.0,0.06808795288113671,0.07215770703576084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694425914707068,0.0,0.12862381241566873,0.06881122665861948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715456469746885,0.0,0.0,0.06700474948984132,0.1354656695464652,0.0,0.06092705155152466,0.0,0.0,0.06869872914785294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17011892400209191,0.10304603686297883,0.06619167165032933,0.1498366866804638,0.04737067200790752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05379270262965702,0.0,0.0616166052492981,0.0,0.0,0.1778510355482112,0.3001850128674417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560540735555415,0.0,0.0,0.03947477607586522,0.0,0.053684118987301015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19016966128268706,0.0,0.0,0.04309824503977624
mentalhealth,AnOnyYmOus_hUmAn,2020/02/23,"I need some advice I did a lot of debating whether or not to post this but in the end I decided to.

 So im 12, and extremely introverted. My friend on the other hand is extremely extroverted and always wants to hang out. Through out the week and school and whatever, the weekends are the best time for me cool cool down and recharge. The problem is my friend always wants to hang out every weekend. I usually make an excuse not to but I feel bad. I don't want to be selfish but I really don't want to go out. I can't keep doing this its rude.

What do I do?",1.2789510489510505,3.127704991452994,3.4846775446775453,89.02370629370633,80.28205128205127,7.331468531468532,23.45687645687645,8.296473431620573,1.3436564102564108,432,15,97,9,11,148,72,117,0.141,0.662,0.19699999999999998,0.8666,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,1,9,1,0,8,2,11,1,1,1,0,28,20,11,0,6,7,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,1,2,2,0,3,5,4,0,0,1,4,12,5,17,18,3,17,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,3,6,69,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19666626153398226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33492431914901194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804140243936636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21120707383811504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17825419271036574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16956791853666295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176171585899037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109817138619536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143791366966016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21739237265799205,0.0,0.0,0.17888669655864586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711017222278364,0.0,0.0,0.1343407813285469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922970538068173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19274881883408515,0.0,0.0,0.19257601383572698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893055183405305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203683087927204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735472458164865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22165643433759769,0.0,0.4748269765047315,0.0,0.16143643130534005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mackson25,2020/02/23,Help me out I have this feeling to just do bad illegal shit at all the time it just happens when i spend too long thinking ive decided to watch a ton of gore to settle some of the urges down it seems to work i grew up in a pretty rough enviroment drug addict mum and dad i feel scared to talk to a doc can anyone tell me whats wrong or did i bump my head or somthing,0.9121428571428574,2.252931085365855,2.7932055749128932,95.90109756097564,79.60975609756099,6.149128919860628,20.25087108013937,6.868970318607317,0.02753101045296136,287,7,72,3,7,96,64,82,0.18899999999999997,0.725,0.085,-0.88,0,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,1,1,5,0,5,4,2,0,1,13,10,4,0,0,4,2,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,5,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,1,4,9,0,13,9,3,9,0,0,1,0,5,5,1,4,3,45,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27587209156020137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769450116512293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21129402302626407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29346855507497643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559088655744824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237795856675882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597119450625848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696203770006389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22394959966961148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574523793811296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533565991638929,0.0,0.0,0.23037576732553536,0.0,0.0,0.2597618305612836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20339955453681333,0.22118506370334065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621502410737851,0.0,0.0,0.14756096722617454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842302521743272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766807205379779,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mrthrowaway14223,2020/02/23,"Please help- anxiety and risperdal Hello there,

I had an experience where I was prescribed 3mg risperdal for a few months and I stopped after a few months. I haven't taken it in a long time but I haven't been the same since. My anxiety has been horrible since, is there anything I can do to reduce the anxiety I've had since? I worry that it may still be in my system having some subtle effects.

Thanks everyone",2.535,4.832036097560977,3.661158536585369,87.07027439024392,78.26829268292683,7.0268292682926825,24.88414634146341,8.07648339933343,1.5606292682926837,328,12,65,6,8,106,56,82,0.18899999999999997,0.721,0.09,-0.7992,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,6,0,14,0,0,1,0,8,16,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,0,9,1,5,8,4,11,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,7,48,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4836749677144535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17343124651741834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20138292493004534,0.0,0.20615626195990408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126287380771935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18650921897961845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364410684277723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23134281887715305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5230096248273143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683071180983487,0.17619842151178414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19403247048402095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289140409195995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140292659378038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TubbySenpai,2020/02/23,"Is talking to myself normal? This has suddenly become an every day thing and I often find myself staying up late talking to myself. It all started as some form of self love so I'd be less lonely, but now I find it to be something else. 

It all started when I was about 14, I didn't really have friends. So I started talking to myself to make up for the silence. Now it's been a few years which I thought I'd be over it by now but I was wrong. I lose touch of reality and when I come back I hear myself whispering on occasion. I wake up to myself whispering like I'm having a conversation with myself while I'm asleep. My mom used to say it was because I was intelligent and I tried to believe her. I do it all the time, at first it was completely in my head, not moving my lips to match the words or using hand gestures. Now it's out loud sometimes, hand gestures and all. It really feels like I'm talking to other people. They all have names. They all love me in their different ways. Some more temperamental or emotional than the others. I sometimes find myself acting out as if they would if they were physically here and I get in trouble for it sometimes. I've never acted on the more violent urges a couple of them have though it's hard. At most I punch pillows or throw the pillows. They can be quite impulsive so it can be difficult to not act on those things (I can honestly say I've done really well and have never acted on impulse). I've never physically hurt anyone, I know I've said some things but it never escalated to where it would be hands on.

Do I need to try and stop this behavior now? Do I need to talk to someone about this? They really are the only people I have left other than my family and I find them comforting in a way. Unless someone makes them uncomfortable or upset everything is under control. I do feel like I can see them in the room with me sometimes too. Almost as if I'm imagining them too well. Occasionally I'll feel a lag in time as if I was just simply sleeping for a moment here and there and everything is just fuzzy. Is this normal? Will I eventually stop doing this naturally? Will this turn into something else if I don't stop?

Anything helps, and I'm open to possibilities of what this might be.",2.940554261760596,4.710833008849559,4.738770377270612,82.27378900791804,75.10619469026548,7.678248719142991,24.72659524918491,8.452757503120043,1.6514991150442482,1768,58,351,33,38,601,205,452,0.10099999999999999,0.79,0.109,0.7639,1,2,2,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,12,4,25,18,1,1,15,0,44,10,8,5,10,78,71,35,0,11,17,1,8,3,1,5,0,7,3,1,31,18,0,4,10,0,0,7,8,8,2,1,12,16,55,10,56,47,15,62,0,3,1,2,30,25,0,16,30,270,86,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802251435328793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448130400169215,0.0,0.0641189648816567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059913282027901964,0.0,0.04749741543525994,0.0860530878965231,0.0,0.08778565769180481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06711850502023167,0.08169438101633099,0.0,0.08739042212340481,0.0,0.08621356130114884,0.0,0.05024995078048436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140657055243856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973603481594463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017913385973828,0.08764601851748596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564834379401886,0.0,0.14005336058507875,0.0,0.07345311331658595,0.0,0.11819136836905582,0.11132768940455844,0.0,0.0,0.28485851843759336,0.06627607030415096,0.0,0.0,0.06019839908823504,0.0,0.04070836125778319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697982326617396,0.0,0.07996521235486975,0.0,0.08781800246025964,0.0,0.05222605168699729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341164663266283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042821087285853536,0.0,0.08789365034799161,0.0,0.08465693340423114,0.0,0.0,0.11419877614558464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716907411057834,0.0,0.0,0.1406460779792689,0.0,0.10402026367159438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265751151865805,0.0,0.0912553246447115,0.0,0.08281332748688855,0.0,0.11554877936409842,0.24037724856753906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268402575893952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05925930902074636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108035527412163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783959085146424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287420783860866,0.0,0.0,0.1996622301057362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411680906327718,0.12392528306176866,0.0,0.0,0.062089676650817785,0.0,0.08128431357299269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797316473325985,0.0,0.13203746301531724,0.11996846348208105,0.30824720231635994,0.0,0.16544993600653474,0.0830490419211108,0.0,0.19542603702584985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131332401269166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529356668845407,0.0,0.07655295283204057,0.06185731050132305,0.09086793506311423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058009129678254,0.08475120636422571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459035895875962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369360758228334,0.0,0.0,0.14011329044897936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069985202501384,0.08518989208211497,0.0,0.05017592518450117
mentalhealth,spidergirl_cynical,2020/02/23,"Need help. (Please respond to this ONLY IF YOU'RE DIAGNOSED OR PROFESSIONAL or educated enough  PLEASE.) Okay so here goes:
Hey! I've been obsessing over my own mental health for a couple of years now and i am in therapy but since im not 100% honest like ever with my therapist i wonder if its possible that i have ocd in some mild way.  My actions arent the stereotypical  obsessive but my mind sure gets ""hung"" more than 10 times a day usually perfecting a moment from a past,  over even a moment that hasnt even happened to the point to which nothing makes sense. I dont know how else to explain how im feeling. (also im sorry if it seems like im trying to create a problem that doesnt exist,  im so frustrated i feel like i will go back to my previos addictions and unhealthy mechanisms and im scared)",2.065462962962961,4.2882642345679045,4.019243827160493,84.28034722222225,79.49382716049381,7.50679012345679,24.32253086419753,8.472884824447931,1.7882086419753094,634,23,126,14,16,215,110,162,0.172,0.727,0.10099999999999999,-0.9336,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,11,12,1,3,8,1,8,3,0,3,3,28,19,15,0,5,8,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,6,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,1,2,11,7,15,17,4,18,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,8,13,75,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850544441843353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693204535298397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358810439048947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12028097807361345,0.0,0.07010629345092433,0.0,0.0,0.11033417030228533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274024706100436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908098059580826,0.0,0.0,0.11232222312247657,0.0,0.14359840445251232,0.09833068338276063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992990872693356,0.07765949559537164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05679433065937978,0.0,0.061780051324734124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09612824226376447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554925701051726,0.0,0.0,0.07286325356509098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7045259648728677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597419035147711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15932459212095582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256201266405526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954994955587843,0.0,0.10976194063017948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060402555798793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430621454447167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267571297842786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037720537041376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23865280406588754,0.10276218445139354,0.12254953561533663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401683700623188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883354024851807,0.0,0.0,0.09896174178312114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992261940115713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168732212792775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245399645154306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431463671083512,0.12621589413801573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338726726960606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380415041897656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972415849018395,0.0,0.0,0.08628566014968989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788687945965536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700030165307628
mentalhealth,xengaa,2020/02/23,"Thinking of taking a leave of absence Been struggling with my mental health these past 4 months. I live my job; I started it last November of 2019. But now that I’m back to school full-time, working part-time, and getting treatments three times a week for whiplash and a concussion, along with counselling for my PTSD, depression and anxiety, I’m feeling like my performance at work is not to par with how I was before I returned back to classes.

My work gave me a great review last month, and also said that they’d like me to move up in the company once I finish school. The people I work with are awesome too, and always say that “health comes first”, which is rare. 

Would it tarnish my reputation if I took a leave of absence from now (I started 4 months ago), till I finish school in August? I just feel like it would lift a huge weight off my shoulders if I did, and feel less stressed about trying not to fuck anything up at work too. I",7.66231831831832,6.247435832432437,6.969369369369371,81.70732732732735,63.64864864864865,9.735735735735735,34.609609609609606,8.167268648758528,2.465510510510511,739,26,150,7,9,228,111,185,0.07,0.807,0.12300000000000001,0.892,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,7,10,8,1,2,8,0,9,5,1,1,0,25,24,12,0,4,6,0,4,3,0,2,2,2,0,0,8,12,1,0,4,0,0,3,2,4,0,2,6,6,22,4,26,15,1,32,0,1,0,1,4,8,1,2,24,95,30,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994483456240216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971711143437971,0.09334982809518128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582390357395278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232158518450792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17253207941305373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546415948907734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664046807553574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662779983159007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17017764561696727,0.1602949888496675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542748984754064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103716470314542,0.058613866404716775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368822905209052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385022812998041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132978584915557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18289721956194466,0.0,0.2375828680728467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442891832939294,0.0,0.0990645102929311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305963171609715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686433965805167,0.11923863215983645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947710240557767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148922434362347,0.10709662781020687,0.07777738743399952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311423653432077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671696453878336,0.08921680658614617,0.0,0.34062228671022343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881521053862674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851155990440358,0.11728379006877113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08435179797653734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188586765113865,0.0,0.0,0.06541802275624073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464556328302948,0.07616863448424266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899908561369542,0.13661538221121608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083728595603264,0.0,0.0,0.15939099824057665,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,twerk4anna,2020/02/23,"My life is over. Built a life with my boyfriend since high school. We have lived together for 3 years, been together for 4. Tonight after a weeklong vacation at my parents house he broke up with me. We have three pets together. We just renewed our lease. I have no friends or family in this city. I just lost my job last week too. I am numb. I’m in denial. I can’t do this. I have no education (we had a five year plan and getting my degree was in that plan..) I depended on him. I was happy 4 hours ago. I had a future.. I had purpose. I feel like such a fool.",-1.0353439680957095,1.064221966101698,1.4170588235294126,97.26597706879365,96.28813559322036,5.149351944167498,18.805583250249256,6.794906146795322,0.17336131605184502,424,14,101,7,17,143,79,118,0.13,0.789,0.08199999999999999,-0.5423,2,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,5,0,0,3,4,7,0,0,5,0,14,3,0,1,0,12,18,2,0,0,3,1,1,1,1,0,3,0,1,0,3,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,7,1,22,3,12,11,0,17,0,2,0,0,9,8,0,2,10,66,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035795904807962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165028571016591,0.0,0.1161229151552619,0.16406903494157624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743462199315482,0.0,0.11998778706969306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444771692297981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24264822920977056,0.0,0.0,0.22616868006227614,0.264996619601698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279019532126964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18720342115728025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32443107240998925,0.11220019681792953,0.0,0.2027938454890104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507008437501417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550100729114926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324280181233093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899769921431964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18421927005844674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957868133742029
mentalhealth,Hemer1,2020/02/23,"Weird imagination and I think I'm going crazy So this has been going on for as long as I can remember, when I was around 9-14 I used to play alot of Call Of Duty: Modern Warfare 3 and this is going to sound extremely weird but the maps in the game are stuck in my head like I don't know how to explain this but the map Terminal, when I'm happy or sad I'm in a certain place in that map and when I'm learning something I'm in a different place in that map and so on. No matter how hard I try I cannot get these Call Of Duty Maps out of my head. The really weird thing is that every time in visualized that place of the map I was in I can remember everything I felt and learned and happened on that day (I mean everything) is this a sign of a mental issue and should I get it checked out?",1.91303690529124,2.8102597167630066,4.060115606936417,89.65601600711432,76.10982658959537,7.635215651400622,23.134281903068032,8.139509932561175,0.9833987550022232,613,17,146,10,13,212,88,173,0.11900000000000001,0.797,0.084,-0.4419,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,10,0,13,2,2,3,1,33,31,19,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,12,10,0,2,10,2,1,3,3,4,0,0,5,3,14,4,26,25,1,33,0,1,0,0,4,23,0,2,8,93,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323563367873158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30363692315156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588602094866076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553385029857837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526894793940532,0.0,0.2672472163337262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275570066857998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535787477290036,0.0,0.25349407323949835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13147685033318116,0.1582721640660612,0.13318768864908626,0.0,0.3051762601925175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15518284008700114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171040187626241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263732648311133,0.0,0.0,0.13157673837896458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619556356880726,0.0,0.0,0.14983403402139486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4660155089573511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524793796420117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3368499327813311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446079472667878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987760980020992,0.09526786330195217,0.0,0.0,0.08669625133650062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094366660713523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841140914728474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lizzzzzzzzz12,2020/02/23,"Feeling lost and that I have a toxic relationship to school I don't know if this is the right place for this post, but I couldn't really find anything better, so if I need to re-post elsewhere, I will. I honestly just felt that I need to vent/share whats on my mind to 1) see if anyone else has been or is in the same boat and 2) just putting this out there so someone who may be in a similar situation can see that they aren't alone in feeling a certain way about school and expectations. 

I’m going to just dive right in and say that for the past couple years I have been letting my anxieties take control. It’s been especially bad this semester and I have felt like I am getting kicked while I am down. It still feels that way sometimes. I don’t really talk to people anymore, I don’t really even leave my apartment except when I need to or I have class. I’ve spent more time crying or feeling empty than smiling this semester. I lost my ability to function. I left dishes in the sink for almost a month, I didn’t do laundry, I just had clothes laying everywhere, I didn’t even take out my trash. Everything piled up so fast and I felt like I was spiraling out of control. I lost my motivation to do basically anything, and I especially lost my ability to take care of myself. I definitely realized that I have a toxic relationship with school. I put so much focus on school that I can’t focus on myself. I have to get good grades, I have to be the perfect student. I spend so much time worrying about school and worrying about getting the good grades that it consumes everything I do. When I talk to my boyfriend, it’s mainly to complain about school lately. When I talk to my parents it's the same thing. I can’t seem to talk about anything else. I want to take a break, but I can’t. I want to take a semester off and get away to reset myself, but my family won’t allow it. I tried to convince them to let me take a break after the semester, but instead I was forced into applying to grad school for a field that I don’t feel like my heart is in 100% anymore, especially because I became aware of what it was doing to me. I don't really know what to do anymore and I feel lost because when I started college I was so sure that I was on the best path for me, but I don't know if that's true anymore. When I talk to people who have made it through college they say that everyone feels that way at some point, but I don't know if that's really true. I also don't worry that I sound like I'm not strong or that I'm just complaining. I've been told I need to buck up and get over it, so please if you feel the need to leave a comment, don't post something like that because trust me, I've heard it. I will say that I have reached out and started to go to therapy, but there's a lot going on in my head. Sorry for the long post ya'll, thanks for reading.",4.31855734726323,4.465578062184875,5.515907335907336,84.158416988417,70.05882352941177,8.852600499659323,28.6861230978878,8.764118213836602,1.937437429025664,2237,75,488,36,37,748,228,595,0.091,0.7340000000000001,0.175,0.995,1,1,1,0,0,0,53.0,0,1,3,12,29,28,0,0,22,0,55,3,2,5,5,86,110,43,0,15,24,1,11,5,0,4,0,5,0,0,39,18,1,2,19,1,3,5,18,8,0,0,24,18,78,20,73,77,9,61,0,5,2,0,22,30,0,15,23,331,117,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054695910191742136,0.056571781639672004,0.0,0.04368108770773308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041785579133093685,0.0,0.21668086091697844,0.03819287977970656,0.0559665581703878,0.13484742861046134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051319042560902486,0.0,0.04560697780799287,0.09989095034377216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05732228004287027,0.04830860300733613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05569063427584664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252613799234108,0.0,0.060438057467436336,0.059999556606634336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912591227474454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215445666912991,0.0,0.0,0.052193535167729635,0.0981812249465187,0.0,0.051492635460017575,0.0,0.22094765930361035,0.03902187305803796,0.1573366759663901,0.0,0.04992339733908727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268835667911764,0.0,0.09312859818998834,0.09162846188896596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05605779446713295,0.0,0.0,0.06472717598497639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200749995774058,0.0,0.061615845704356575,0.11567334182103388,0.05934681886332972,0.11170912053292786,0.0,0.1334274270240934,0.0,0.0,0.04833863389013748,0.0,0.0,0.2981311038930845,0.04643755845450037,0.0,0.05168453173274962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05515251523382323,0.0,0.04359865351780278,0.0,0.08030671497451693,0.20250711321115686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06065111979976436,0.0,0.05214275312465577,0.07573585078400065,0.0,0.057068225868656126,0.059958407879221964,0.05163532013808169,0.0,0.20925060075608126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982012700290496,0.0,0.0,0.05463664895598327,0.0,0.17496083497605994,0.0,0.0,0.11728688806970125,0.0,0.0932935527973285,0.0,0.1303125041986118,0.0,0.3869617222468675,0.0870531129655738,0.0497256967207682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06139726763979636,0.0,0.0,0.04628093108054861,0.04205058218673443,0.05402242363790506,0.061144708711339736,0.07732327791152555,0.0,0.043621093945759734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148046369823518,0.0,0.2464130795213837,0.2195149402963237,0.0,0.05028847691733112,0.06246486583252318,0.0,0.036288341672278096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063700900396729,0.0,0.0,0.052193535167729635,0.0,0.037084662560920405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443478531399865,0.13006888795544294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16641347357322256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035174691823596636
mentalhealth,iemplex,2020/02/23,"why do i feel like i’m in a video game and nothing i do matters I feel so disconnected from reality for some reason. I used to never have thoughts like this, but for some reason i’ve been feeling like i’m in a video game or movie. Nothing really feels real to me. It’s to the point where I feel so disconnected that I sometimes think that nothing matters and nothing I do matters and none of it has repercussions. It’s scaring the shit out of me.",4.359927536231886,4.894234847826088,5.653043478260872,81.84340579710147,70.08695652173913,8.307246376811595,31.63768115942029,8.344100000000001,2.260363768115942,354,15,73,5,6,119,51,92,0.079,0.7659999999999999,0.155,0.8356,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,1,4,0,6,1,1,3,1,23,16,7,0,0,2,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,9,4,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,5,9,3,11,14,3,6,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,3,4,48,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4081361706027344,0.2306607874802629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23660941654237055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450991694761875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6196113791742677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15260983996246258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18375028051188386,0.10342046860169728,0.3319675807661777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616262757408651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571242822094728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596650006956136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344210358730747,0.0,0.12816268825805785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13942945528970802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567149040972807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TrappedInWrongBody,2020/02/24,"[Venting] I started to have intrusive thoughts about self harming Please don't read this if there even a tiny chance it could  trigger any undesired feelings on you. I already appreciate you initial action of clicking on my post. 

---

My mind started to wonder what is it like to self harm, more specifically cutting. 

It feels more like a curiosity thing, to explore what level of physical sensation feels all right, at which point it becomes pain, if it ever does actually, at which point I say it is time to stop, etc.

I'm normally very tolerant to physical sensations/pain, like if my body have become somewhat ""unimpressed"" by the sensations. And I see this as a potential trigger for it, my mind or body wanting to feel something.

At least all of this is seen just like a wonder, and never got close to a desired to actually do something. And when the thought comes, not wanting any scar are always there helping it not go further, I already have enough dysphoria with my body, creating more things I don't like in it is, for now, out of question.

But of course, the fact that this thoughts and considerations exists are already concerning.

I want to seek professional help, for that and other mental problems as well, and nothing is holding me back other than myself just making the appointment. It is so irrational...",9.201094839609482,8.521021686192473,8.61850418410042,68.74594316596932,60.171548117154806,11.648675034867505,42.09239888423989,10.864195022040775,4.7180792189679215,1049,53,175,22,12,333,138,239,0.067,0.797,0.135,0.9084,0,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,0,0,12,12,1,0,9,0,15,4,3,3,5,51,36,15,0,10,9,0,4,5,0,0,1,1,0,2,24,10,0,2,12,1,0,4,5,6,1,0,5,8,16,6,31,30,9,27,0,0,3,0,8,13,0,8,14,129,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.1924366669792348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32641911619084424,0.0,0.08204220910275911,0.0,0.0,0.13410130822402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581649171173069,0.0,0.0,0.21778954530440173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285635540692674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493424842258379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872322325397943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628458887525936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187905277317584,0.10996387140151306,0.06512366394942658,0.089188377892514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994183281135672,0.07043909593448791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603604464255482,0.0,0.0788585722228383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217757000925578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24085228606180506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581555200762254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936453162908168,0.0,0.199113625622507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604557393977421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966060177447408,0.09460833342444734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20983242843384928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823201742269282,0.1864157193789616,0.0,0.09443052053834412,0.0,0.0,0.09434586079285104,0.0,0.0,0.11045336803109378,0.0,0.09862561316893773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842029482514371,0.0,0.0784098273213516,0.0,0.0,0.07857058227904277,0.0,0.2057203771087192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15181254822632476,0.0,0.0,0.1395776615509516,0.0,0.0,0.08243312119854929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310094969841817,0.0,0.0,0.23482961257652896,0.05749382951818849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135444410619612,0.1744686121614543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865228013281942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138526692200399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shoddy_Weird,2020/02/24,"Ranting asking maybe even melting This is just gonna be a nice wall of text about anything and everything than im thinking at the moment

Okay starting this with the fact i have awful memory, specially for a 16 year old. This causes problems all over the place with frie ds, school, and occasionally family. As a male i was always taught to be ""manly"" and hide my emotions and shit because i'd be made fun of otherwise. Im now extremely aware of my emotions and have trouble showing any at all, i quickly start overthinking and the moment passes before I reach a conclusion.  I just realized theres going to be no real order to this wall and im sorry to those that are so vallantly going through it. Recently i've felt a wonderful mix of ambition and overwealming lazyness(?) that has me torn between my hobbies (anything i find i ""want"" to do, really) and work (the opposite) so then i do neither. Time seems to be going faster than i remember, friends have gotten different interests and split apart. We all still see eachother at school though which makes us have to be all buddy-buddy with eachother regardless. Noone seems capable of holding conversation for more than 10 minutes. My only surviving afterschool friend has recently gotten help for his declining mental health (im super glad, wish i could join him) and left my school for a better place (not the dead place, an actual place? I dont feel like doing grammar or fixing anything...) I havent talked to him recently as he's probably dealing with alot. Bouncing back to my family... father is a lovely guy thats had multiple girlfriend at the same time, mother blames all her problems on other people (i got used to it, worry that she hurts herself sometimes) She isnt really a responsible person in anyway, but my grandmother taught me how to take care of myself. I think of killing myself constantly but cant find a reason to. I just want to be happy or at least know when i am? I dont know how I feel half the time its like a storm of emotions but its all outside my little cave, i dont come into contact with it but i know its there. I space out constantly, maybe its defensive? I feel sympathy when i see others be shunned for their happiness (my poor prof. tries to cheer the classroom up, only to be met with glares), so I think im fine as far as that goes. I just noticed i might need to state i dont take any medication for anything and i dont drink or do drugs or anything that could affect my mental state. I think im past whatever I just wrote, im a pretty normal guy outside my head. 

I think the question i wanted to ask was something along the lines of if i might be depressed, the reason being with the overwealming demotivation and thoughts of death. Maybe something about my foggy memory and waning (fading? inconsistent?) consiousness of self

This is mostly fragments of stuff ive put together while thinking about myself, with some added as i went, i wish i could make something more coherent but its hard to remember/get my thoughts straight.

TLDR: im fine, I need to be fine until I can get proper help.",4.74989097051597,6.284323322635133,5.603218673218674,78.85431203931205,69.99662162162161,8.76019656019656,29.33292383292383,9.218907990703514,2.626863513513513,2445,94,442,50,44,800,296,592,0.086,0.782,0.132,0.9769,2,0,5,0,0,1,75.0,2,0,1,6,24,29,3,0,26,2,45,7,2,10,7,108,98,40,3,15,16,2,5,2,3,3,3,0,0,6,24,27,1,2,26,2,1,7,11,9,0,1,15,7,67,20,71,65,14,60,0,2,2,1,34,23,1,14,29,295,91,8,0.0,0.0,0.052262858214336586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044562820685219336,0.0,0.0,0.07283973234503456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22035981907527474,0.0,0.100135122532128,0.0,0.0,0.041181201263127,0.0,0.032647195384937745,0.0,0.04557214842259075,0.0,0.0,0.04736586434685641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054603835844716175,0.055016688632925484,0.0,0.04613368805987194,0.0,0.11574985977084346,0.0,0.12828014701197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055213808045226666,0.04612764056417895,0.0,0.0,0.05595454384387888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138357318824887,0.05246441849946592,0.062107871247368863,0.0,0.0,0.1807296248667921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035373184007123235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481326129583874,0.0,0.10097552130377008,0.0,0.08123845604224716,0.03826036421600918,0.051422087624693684,0.0,0.09789829218362298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275435111086532,0.0,0.05596152176300852,0.0,0.0913112007815671,0.0,0.042833566427462035,0.0,0.0,0.10605757352768644,0.0,0.11402255813306635,0.04797559021578971,0.0,0.05496383093319746,0.0569274449211736,0.0,0.0,0.07179481653831285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05733272642398095,0.0,0.4627967223500346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059251697118420266,0.0,0.08829880891870154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05818867027206427,0.0,0.0,0.052329440432078336,0.05367710747141249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04833631415348245,0.05067591208366032,0.07149799291096308,0.0,0.16141237813641815,0.0,0.0,0.053951961048507344,0.10794355378489334,0.11362874816885722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942208100844085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052473436453665916,0.0,0.060973776686417125,0.05619793523209882,0.0,0.0,0.08146339004966209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051125191320457085,0.03712893574964245,0.046762968811159614,0.22381817537551552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448563041736045,0.05774234634690927,0.10249157654052232,0.0,0.05383849784876005,0.059994893939083825,0.0,0.0,0.060958368641484836,0.06861859511218156,0.11012882325400204,0.15864004758951986,0.0,0.06066842402345541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16260436889696425,0.08535427818255821,0.097510607171611,0.05587051090316904,0.0,0.054974388391830484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368990495920973,0.05296818020866468,0.059951474438405025,0.0758143201088927,0.0,0.04276983166295597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06130872209592556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805347824287706,0.04304622463458523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058988492194853,0.052618425350071364,0.08503484593497664,0.09368667336041199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03636095823227909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442118477814067,0.046255124679832865,0.0,0.0,0.09476601817500907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04964687993072686,0.0,0.0,0.1231733436065523,0.0,0.05807911717474505,0.03898935195626027,0.05438864249197621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03448826042653205
mentalhealth,throwaway2213456,2020/02/24,"Why do I still care and how do I stop? So about a year ago me and my girlfriend broke up. The break up wasn’t that messy I was really depressed and (not to her knowledge) addicted to pain killers, I wanted a week break, I told her it was to get my shit together but really it was to go through the torture of withdrawal without her seeing me like that. I got clean in that week and asked if we could continue where we left off she said she didn’t want to and we broke up. About a week later I got in a fight with someone(I didn’t really start it, someone followed me around campus insulting me and telling me to fight them for 4 hours until I punched them) and my ex texted me seeing if I was okay because I got a bloody nose. I didn’t take well to this and basically said she never cared about me so why is she trying to now, basically just being really immature. She blocked me on everything and then for about a few months I was depressed and got drunk and high a lot but gradually got better. Fast forward to about a month ago I didn’t have any friends and was really isolated, I decided that because at one point me and my ex were best friends maybe we could be just friends. I texted her apologizing for being inconsiderate and asked if we could be friends and if she didn’t want to I understood. Her response was she blocked my number and showed the text to a lot of her friends(some were mutual acquaintances of mine who told me) and talked a lot of shit about me, and also went around campus showing the message to people making fun of me. After this i really hated her and got completely over any desire to be friends within about a week. I didn’t think about her until last night when I had a dream with her in it. The dream was usual bullshit I think I was at a football game or something but at the end of the dream I had a conversation with her and saw her face and I immediately woke up and felt lonely and sad and disturbed. Why do I still care about this woman, why do I still think about her, why do I think about her when I’m singing to myself alone in my room or when I am painting or drawing. I don’t want to care she obviously doesn’t care about me and wants to forget me, yet i still do. How do I remedy this.",4.524979671736184,4.869473807860263,5.3321924408974555,84.96264192139739,69.65502183406113,8.849992471013401,27.5834964613763,8.841846274778883,1.7926592982984495,1756,54,382,29,29,573,188,458,0.183,0.664,0.152,-0.9542,2,3,1,0,2,0,31.0,5,0,2,2,32,31,7,1,21,1,40,7,4,3,2,78,81,46,0,13,14,2,1,1,6,0,2,2,2,1,13,35,1,3,8,8,0,4,12,15,1,1,35,7,80,16,62,38,5,61,0,6,3,0,53,23,2,10,35,278,93,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075412648536882,0.0,0.0,0.12264167246554787,0.0,0.0,0.0716460415288628,0.0,0.05532046071781252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408485007753553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316358861199207,0.12934146910787142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433876359385789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259651963304152,0.06118103543760016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35265050705933115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253029479966255,0.0,0.0,0.16569553471688675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191633194464112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061269889145326224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062171421121904075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642033474156504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672281482532198,0.0,0.03614189135294316,0.0,0.03931462659801644,0.0,0.33196083065140297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829751982455498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730888213813777,0.0,0.0,0.06812496556421622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05638811977118824,0.0,0.0,0.07516052218348822,0.0,0.0,0.033796167278400506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17643428287559676,0.0,0.0,0.04617588318424968,0.0,0.0694971407714983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043212181065433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335321868174179,0.0,0.0,0.06491750447284228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04687581946096448,0.0,0.07360872474720477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04795830848191869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539419802141795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658976094151235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13160547749043286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024950542435218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14201746556258915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05861306492539605,0.05325548657549936,0.0,0.0,0.04896351696754763,0.0,0.2209779234656925,0.0578346919362837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520121552269429,0.05560148919774213,0.060463352332354024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17730215580867606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220231287688325,0.0,0.04696633545761123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07618819481166203,0.0,0.20401060257896766,0.0,0.22195701766559495,0.0,0.06219802473063421,0.06412735336496968,0.31210537578284503,0.0,0.0,0.06668372403262829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0445474290912392
mentalhealth,slippedaway12,2020/02/24,"I'm severely depressed and don't know how to cope I (F20) have been depressed for a while and it just keeps getting worse. I am on antidepressants and go to therapy sessions as well. I felt better initially but then it just kept going downhill. I don't have any energy or motivation to do anything and I don't see the point in doing anything at all. All I feel is a lot of pain and sadness and all I want is for it to stop. 

It's been almost an year since me and my ex broke up and I'm still not over him and miss him a lot. I feel incredibly lonely despite having loving friends and family and feel a desperate need to have a partner. 
I get intrusive thoughts and terrible dreams. I have no idea how to go on like this.",2.08023076923077,3.782403833333333,4.014000000000003,86.83546153846157,77.33333333333334,7.548717948717949,25.538461538461537,8.384062270229773,1.6294307692307697,565,21,122,11,13,192,92,150,0.284,0.628,0.087,-0.9868,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,6,13,0,0,7,0,15,2,0,3,3,38,35,19,0,2,5,1,4,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,5,12,0,3,8,1,0,3,5,8,1,0,5,5,14,5,16,30,5,15,0,6,1,1,6,7,0,4,6,86,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17173849005008404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11662996461438035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822696577679837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168312416458213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954357416505135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16168059790214384,0.0,0.2601557679716014,0.0,0.16467266056543725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250511404994442,0.0,0.1792096179615214,0.0,0.2924124450541512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19360940390028974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244241749881945,0.0,0.0,0.09425521509696687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837891709564975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916165447336306,0.15479086558435254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271695295877396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18249448142822686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16212861039664506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136668081054479,0.0,0.0,0.19375296844453616,0.0,0.14187153965797478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13696491716319725,0.14338669973866305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961320636525077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615661059003994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115868533620424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420449556841634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17477927129719553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044424419640717
mentalhealth,Dicks_n_Donuts,2020/02/24,"Needed to rant, had nowhere else to go.. I don't know what to do with myself. I don't want to go to therapy, I have before and it didn't do anything for me. I feel like I have no one but I know that's because I've pushed away the few people I had. I quit my job because I had no motivation to go, no I have no money so I can't do anything which is just making it worse. I feel like I can't even talk to my mom or boyfriend about it because they'll think it's stupid and I don't want to be judged but I also need to talk to somebody because this is slowly killing me and I'm trying so hard not to fall back into a really bad depression again.",0.2187407797681757,1.5803693356164388,2.6913698630137013,95.77001580611172,81.67123287671234,5.588198103266596,20.134878819810325,6.297961479604792,-0.11187291886196027,497,13,125,4,13,172,80,146,0.27399999999999997,0.6729999999999999,0.053,-0.9871,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,2,9,6,2,0,2,0,19,0,0,2,0,21,33,9,1,4,5,1,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,6,0,1,5,11,4,0,1,4,3,21,2,16,27,1,9,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,4,85,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821615277158396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638764953726691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506356765908834,0.1232841712040798,0.1338691763631296,0.39094366378025264,0.0,0.13642935067314252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809232761858192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13393546541557075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058967086779066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16213572238255156,0.22908012139803025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733583616970485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436245348936934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910316997781904,0.0,0.1773818185877012,0.0,0.17622677568007294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156658657235881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702177848653098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877770118075513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23776590123892424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086440197951024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115290305245998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17053110231583327,0.0,0.0,0.1027117515773903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577349841560457,0.0,0.0,0.183351770771528,0.0,0.0,0.10273323830334907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885380859121406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891340328542523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633903620331808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AraneaNox,2020/02/24,I have anxiety and my body won't listen to me I recently learned that feeling disconnected with my body and having trouble with it listening to me is a symptom of my anxiety disorder. Above all this is a thing that just destroys my life because without proper control of my body I can't do the things I need to in my profession. Does anyone have some tips?,6.563714285714287,6.5318855142857135,7.417857142857144,73.04964285714289,65.28571428571429,11.0,38.92857142857143,10.686352973137794,4.336142857142857,286,15,52,7,4,96,48,70,0.177,0.8009999999999999,0.021,-0.872,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,3,0,8,5,3,1,1,12,12,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,6,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,3,12,0,9,11,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,43,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142967540854823,0.0,0.0,0.1436368526292828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252242284974375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6845374309121579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303998667755904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23543307084514006,0.0,0.17976744548949505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038682686446716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509665788489598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15231888532347745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20283087448464932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21351361986769246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729484246805396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19802087532452373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HateHate-,2020/02/24,"Hate doing anything because everything is really exhausting. So yeah, I don’t really have energy to do anything. And I don’t enjoy doing anything because it’s just exhausting and hard for me to do. 

Meeting friends is ok for one hour but then it’s too hard again and it’s more exhausting then fun or something else. When I do weekend trips with my friends it’s getting too much very fast, and I can’t have fun with my friends anymore because I’m just really tired and annoyed.

Jobs are very Hard for me. Right now I have a job where I’m a barkeeper, and I’m always on the edge of quitting because it’s very hard for me to do.

That’s why I don’t have a girlfriend too, because I couldn’t imagine doing something that exhausting. 

I can’t even play computer games, because it’s rather annoying and exhausting then fun 

That’s why I’m pretty unhappy with my life. I’m basically doing nothing all day, maybe a little household. One time a week I’m doing the Barkeeper Job, and I maybe meet some friends, but I don’t have the power to do anything meaningful.

I did everything that I could to make sure that I’m healthy. I did every test, but the doctors say that I’m 100% healthy physically. 

Mentally I’m just depressed, and there were times where I wasn’t, but the 0 energy thing was still there, so I don’t think that it’s because of depression. 

And now I have some job interviews for a job that I should enjoy, because I like doing computer stuff, and that job is all about PCs, but I already know that I’m going to hate doing it because it’s so damn exhausting for me.

Can someone help me out, or suggest what I can do in that situation? Thanks",3.6739639639639634,5.002930846846848,4.948343543543544,83.30979459459459,72.36336336336336,8.451123123123123,30.43711711711712,8.954980946260402,2.5102121081081084,1304,57,262,26,25,433,133,333,0.166,0.633,0.2,0.9295,7,0,2,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,21,27,5,0,11,2,40,9,0,1,3,39,58,25,0,4,11,0,4,1,5,1,9,1,0,0,23,15,0,0,4,3,0,2,9,13,0,2,5,5,28,14,21,50,6,24,0,2,0,0,12,7,1,4,16,172,51,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796303276600295,0.0,0.06632590895762942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07905185897859537,0.0,0.0,0.26238133175899386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43731958344983657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06364271995473336,0.0,0.0,0.051406978539586784,0.0,0.13730987587618088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158755101574025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658828353746953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05264834105925675,0.0,0.06715992649069841,0.0,0.14327815231990867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463379774093821,0.0,0.0416456896187319,0.0,0.04530157873555792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856214736780721,0.1573961519925262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053428580059893566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849924464296505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.474605002998477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04380706211558258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056302212392712124,0.03894275147458203,0.07989132843286649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053207688556827164,0.0,0.1601607578139901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032990518567497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058596731435658835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648482138606763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080284265608068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109470870544616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478242381680487,0.0,0.0,0.15319465719055803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807272915693563,0.0,0.0633893592721958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959846518224628,0.0,0.0,0.06753884254833963,0.12273079141095818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365728015846292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09124998502152036,0.0,0.0,0.07512664181235405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338714769165308,0.0,0.0,0.05295642367865882,0.051075568219667015,0.0,0.0,0.09296021021258903,0.09161602909178274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973096840796056,0.0,0.0,0.06393932857672671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438534965562237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skyofAuroras,2020/02/24,"Could I get some advice about school? I hope this kind of post is allowed here. Anyway, I (21/f) am a college student and I am currently in my last semester at a community college. If all goes as planned, I'll be getting my associates degree and moving on to a state university. However, I've been having some troubles with my mental health lately. I've dealt with depression and anxiety all my life and most recently I've been working on some unresolved trauma. I go to a therapist every week, and I take all my meds, but I'm starting to grow unwell. The depression is hitting harder and the memories won't stop. It's been bad enough that I started self harming again and I started drinking regularly. I need a break but I don't want to drop school. I'm so close to getting my degree and I don't want everyone to be disappointed in me. But at the same time I know that I can't keep doing this.

I dont know I'm just overwhelmed with school, work, and working on my health. I dont know what to do anymore.",2.855882352941176,4.561246156862747,4.707647058823528,82.68441176470589,75.17647058823529,7.937254901960784,28.66666666666667,8.671277953709913,2.2780666666666662,792,34,158,16,17,270,114,204,0.152,0.8079999999999999,0.040999999999999995,-0.9695,3,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,4,6,10,0,1,8,0,19,4,0,1,3,38,39,15,0,6,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,6,13,1,2,3,1,0,3,6,8,0,0,3,0,23,2,20,31,9,26,0,4,0,0,1,8,0,7,11,103,29,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442638320117776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974078693565576,0.0,0.1262781408691272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631606952050117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166344548474568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193400139180741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984619761911263,0.1247359082659526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13156696460748293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728186240944657,0.12167023074351956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19957558221458607,0.0,0.0723651437812688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706938054626438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646841724240415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131776466486238,0.0,0.13259564619386952,0.20993336902015133,0.10379176270755476,0.14363491839007128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993765358124597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143604045797142,0.0,0.12831970321895822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13533270592465824,0.0,0.09441432588317723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219479040622339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12572400488681768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3865973210506722,0.0,0.0,0.13283400678234036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703766194924473,0.0,0.0,0.10645442064876988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573706828901424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14784110940228684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424773226159986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502062501010771,0.0,0.10213725072898686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27809546172790595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wastedpal,2020/02/24,"Dealing with my insecurities I have an extremely hard time making friends and communicating to others in general. The older I get the more and more I feel singled out because of it. I recently made a lot of mistakes in the past couple of years while dealing with a traumatic event. It's hard for me to gain the respect of others and I'm not sure If I ever can at this point but honestly I'm at the point where I'm not trying to focus on these problems anymore. Don't get me wrong, I'm making the decision to interact with others while I'm attending club meetings and what not but my little failures with my classmates and teachers are not going to weigh me down anymore. 

Yes, it sucks at the moment and I know that I can't solve all of my issues over night, but life is extremely short, I'm so low right now the only option that I have is up. I'm trying to start my ecommerce store and hopefully it will me up and running by April. I'm not trying to brag about it or anything but I am literally putting my whole personality into this, and choosing this as a catalyst to express who I really am. Before and until this day I have been battling fear and I don't want it to ruin the remaining aspects of my life that I feel hope towards. 

It's extremely hard for me to feel confident, definitely when I see other's being surrounded by such a great support system. But I also have to acknowledge that I'm trying. I'm not perfect not will I ever be, but progression is still an obstacle that I can take. 

​

TLDR; My inability to make friends and gain respect is putting a real damper on my heart, but I'm focusing on other things to express myself.",4.163537260825777,5.395659728096678,5.831046072507554,77.82135259315207,71.05438066465257,8.658660624370595,30.40798086606244,9.075114841892004,2.6658911379657604,1314,55,247,26,24,450,165,331,0.14300000000000002,0.7070000000000001,0.149,0.8472,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,4,10,20,2,2,16,1,21,4,1,4,5,59,51,28,0,6,16,0,6,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,25,18,1,0,7,1,1,5,10,9,0,0,2,7,32,11,45,45,6,48,0,2,1,0,10,23,1,6,19,184,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843777188182173,0.0,0.11982284878810295,0.13437741825953173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193486192142143,0.0,0.0,0.09100510660430107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741386675677914,0.0,0.09410286872599466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236433247836258,0.0,0.0713205856657102,0.2280242608780153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20006768529781807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444307301641795,0.16775096257380862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088116555045485,0.0,0.1155560999086184,0.0,0.06285012694362575,0.0,0.0,0.12192447137997768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29719735569174544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310481841160852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21967913453111812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154259080810023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06077667692473974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562241888630443,0.0,0.11083896574578654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940185882921778,0.0,0.10464173552140013,0.22145651918850096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378003684733926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841077167213137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556946147913976,0.0,0.09656181829454699,0.0,0.0,0.20908420110646986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581848460683904,0.0,0.22234444812591492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587419203560846,0.07084597579343957,0.0,0.10919303485226864,0.0,0.0,0.09444217593137193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812490427852739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827527623451995,0.0,0.08831630708059628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549478659059254,0.1042285745120976,0.0,0.08314896621172183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347024195586559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448518104272423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003299688708434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522810149533824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346837391401523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091142183675037,0.13437741825953173,0.07121551991384831
mentalhealth,sooshwashi,2020/02/24,Help. Please. I don’t know what to do right now I’m panicking and crying and I want to leave my house and never come back but I can’t because nobody would help me or believe me and I would get found and brought back and it would be even worse if I just left. Who can even help me here. I just want to be taken away from my Mom and make sure she can’t even see me again. She blames me for all my problems when she’s the reason I am mentally unwell in the first place. She’s so toxic and narcissistic and I can’t handle it anymore I’m only a kid,-0.8532782369145977,1.1837205867768643,1.306413223140499,100.06386225895321,91.06611570247934,4.2184022038567495,14.678236914600554,5.6839178017228535,-1.02658391184573,425,8,105,3,15,141,73,121,0.132,0.737,0.131,-0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,12,2,0,0,3,0,12,0,0,2,3,28,24,14,0,7,5,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,10,0,0,3,0,0,2,5,1,0,1,3,1,20,1,7,16,1,14,0,0,1,0,10,5,0,2,7,73,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15794765734803962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963430578106496,0.2449292463699519,0.0,0.0970862033702389,0.0,0.0,0.17943663118414258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137192324436736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494465118578298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31557823842530336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13547036151681582,0.0,0.17462538004722536,0.0,0.0,0.0832091641981922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202550514913514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837699300145946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752764230794144,0.0,0.0,0.16863818318731552,0.17304142084081747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631033689834514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605012267011073,0.0,0.0,0.18652873900369416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283465440248985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112788189517053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16639757746609055,0.17482467113641206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523946839295784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16375050299567293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601107220687675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691324189481512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010497200198095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878767390714662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623042027457627,0.33941094209867606,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SilentVoice20,2020/02/24,"Why when I watch certain shows or movies do I feel alone, empty, and really sad? The best examples of this I have are all animation. RWBY, MHA, A Silent Voice, and Your Name. I don't get why I feel what I feel, and why I love watching them.",1.9644000000000013,3.2348712400000004,3.6810000000000014,90.93550000000002,76.6,7.4,20.5,8.07648339933343,0.6013999999999999,182,4,43,3,4,61,37,50,0.136,0.6609999999999999,0.203,0.6778,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,1,1,1,4,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,2,10,9,5,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,9,3,1,9,2,1,0,1,2,1,4,0,0,1,1,25,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839831011866387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877505070875766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159233610182527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432554565491885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474714959070073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17565619841770044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7422544270736384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Casey_Doylez,2020/02/24,"I get so angry i need to be in pain or I will go into a rage that I don’t realise what I’m doing It’s not all the time but sometimes at the slightest thing the anger festers in me and I get this rage so strong that unless I hurt myself I go into these fits of rage and have little control of what I do such and I usual end up in the hospital due to an overdose if I injure myself I don’t fly into the anger I’m too busy feeling the pain to feel anger

I’ve hit so hard I broke my wrist and left scars on my arms from box cutters because If I don’t I have little control on what I’ll do and quite frequently don’t remember what I did in these fits 

Does anyone else get like this or know what it is? 

I’ve done DBT and CBT therapy in the past but didn’t get any answers for this",3.5989830508474583,2.725052542372886,5.246333333333336,88.97458474576273,71.59887005649718,7.983954802259888,26.174576271186442,6.742157984588678,0.8681688135593221,608,15,149,4,10,209,96,177,0.244,0.6990000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.9901,0,0,0,0,0,2,1.0,0,0,0,4,5,12,6,0,9,0,15,5,2,2,1,26,28,16,0,3,8,0,3,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,15,9,0,2,5,0,0,2,6,10,0,0,3,3,20,2,20,22,1,25,0,2,0,0,0,17,0,4,7,98,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106738377297925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379679173133465,0.1667539813905119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920932677923933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650701776661455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14242137849706427,0.16654713233645574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595459997747175,0.0,0.1441459228218782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645799879082331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34011527386583873,0.0,0.18498623746248224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578973633187126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17422449689401706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944173493766283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.176825566049512,0.0,0.0,0.07951017682817563,0.3262313735012349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12067516206750345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3463494941621528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15536084348312632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17310193179327313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843611199417557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16096137623042167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861158773224095,0.0,0.1081221652667813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489933905686697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17924330862116145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,milky557,2020/02/24,"Please help me with something shitty Ok so this is gonna sound stupid but to cut a long story short I'm a 24 year old guy from a small town. 99% I'm a very happy guy just trying to make a living and enjoy life.

But one day a few kids no older than 14 started shouting at me in the street at night very loudly ""paedo, paedo!"" for whatever reason I have no idea. 

I have no idea why they're shouting this and at the time I reacted angrily and shouted back, swearing at these kids (probably the wrong idea) and they stopped. 

But since then a few months ago it has happened a couple more times. 

I have never ever had perverted thoughts about children. I absolutely hate the thought of people abusing children.

I have just ignored it pretending I haven't heard them but god damn it is fucking with me, I don't know what to do about it.

Its my worst nightmare that something like that spreads around and people in my town begin to think that I'm a child abuser all because some kids started shouting it.

Does anyone have experience of anything like this and does anyone have any suggestions of what I can do about it?

I feel like I'm trapped because if I make a fuss out of it, i feel like it makes me look guilty. But I need it to stop.",3.4329930247305,4.799748000000001,4.117036567321918,88.88737476220675,73.01606425702812,6.687888395688015,26.358275206087505,7.0608816371341465,1.0948746987951807,968,33,201,9,19,308,141,249,0.22899999999999998,0.647,0.124,-0.9864,0,1,2,0,1,0,22.0,0,0,2,0,9,15,5,0,14,1,15,2,0,5,3,40,38,14,0,2,8,0,2,4,0,1,1,7,0,8,19,10,0,3,10,1,0,0,6,8,0,1,4,10,21,7,25,33,6,32,0,0,1,1,13,13,2,2,23,123,40,0,0.0,0.2654079110108546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992829405262778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616514343683442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15662868736927332,0.0,0.0921680335017174,0.09970545082547223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612255976585925,0.0,0.136550656585363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12392798949534975,0.0,0.0722319699880293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19602726252584834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013121450498298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955936511129742,0.0,0.0,0.11326306779446453,0.16002838201843114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035439663598269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217990110681541,0.09904292422846238,0.11922812201041555,0.0,0.11057870400028026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507252324540672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3793095899722338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155332380719085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911026540255255,0.21887391445090787,0.0,0.098899743600181,0.09911817096676488,0.09405340084830656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242864454682679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939886061157426,0.0,0.0,0.08304800137657496,0.08638278214532502,0.0,0.0,0.10510621073766163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11752716985645335,0.0,0.07589539676199132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529605208502967,0.0,0.0,0.1229444699776732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075700858040077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151566233101714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092649142125538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724490933653436,0.0,0.0,0.1585510649135034,0.0,0.0,0.18727723340461389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176630518993707,0.0,0.17783402078105318,0.13061843556874025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604194881287406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18482662060898447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106430820399807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12245651254545313,0.0,0.07212556163251146
mentalhealth,Pineconeinatree,2020/02/24,"I feel so numb I literally haven't cried in ages, nothing really affects me. I just broke up w my bf and I haven't shed a single tear. I do feel like basic light anxiety, but in a bigger scale... I'm afraid I'm  emotionally numb. I feel very empty, like I'm just going on and on from day to another. 

Yall know that feeling of happiness and joy at a certain moment when u realize how happy u are? Last week, I felt something similar to that, like that feeling but also there was smth missing, like it wasnt satisfying enough. I sincerely don't remember when was the last time I've felt real genuine joy. Of I have fun, but I'm still not like, happy.",1.868557213930348,3.664849313432839,4.351567164179105,83.75307213930348,78.25373134328359,7.750248756218907,24.59950248756219,8.59863814320734,1.7604248756218908,504,18,105,11,12,177,84,134,0.129,0.544,0.327,0.9879,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,0,9,18,0,1,4,0,9,2,0,2,1,23,23,11,0,0,6,0,7,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,10,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,5,8,12,13,11,18,2,18,0,2,0,0,2,7,0,0,15,58,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217798037154202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15968088040943088,0.11649525897823372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727454855192686,0.09820924632571247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17129667369534424,0.0,0.15734794032733873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849915946663189,0.10879024060508052,0.2924290659400039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865453296687728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4863208357219193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369016573891835,0.24826019409508784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719862926025775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14611861807630014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333017411855833,0.09755570320882176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17250574012782358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723406887400112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12161254532189875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879681750044706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256485397943941,0.0,0.0,0.12215137805185032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sairemrys,2020/02/24,"Feel really self destructive right now I don't know if it's anxiety, depression, whatever but I just feel like I've got all this energy I need to get rid of and I just want to... run away. Fuck my job, friends, family. Just completely go off the deep end and go crazy. I don't know what's wrong with me.",-0.6535069444444446,1.5366899687500035,1.9333333333333336,93.86722222222224,94.625,7.844444444444445,16.48611111111111,8.515128840125781,1.0874152777777777,234,6,56,8,9,80,49,64,0.193,0.599,0.20800000000000002,0.2627,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,15,13,4,0,3,5,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,1,2,7,2,6,12,1,9,0,1,0,1,2,4,1,1,3,28,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859545858313784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22838049639756106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548634547739925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093633795391008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152956314920429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22915302118548836,0.0,0.2458158492033173,0.17365551449603267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780204675795448,0.22472239641971373,0.12699861923517555,0.0,0.2762945217745505,0.0,0.19441228979593791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412181613300427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671794585399861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875600360489624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802398202745728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572247784843174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20758793262033973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535841598702384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337415042201535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657684645842552,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,italianmeatball1971,2020/02/24,"E60 Feature Research on Mental Health Hey, fellow peeps. I'm doing research on mental health and athletes for an E60 special airing in May. I am trying to find a few compelling individual stories that could make for a dramatic feature. Our only guidelines are that the athlete must have been diagnosed with a particular mental health concern. And, they must be an active athlete. They do not need to be famous, just a great character and a great story. Please feel free to PM me.

Best,

Frankie Saraceno

Producer, E60",5.5661956521739135,8.14962996739131,5.6971739130434775,74.69945652173917,69.97826086956522,7.208695652173913,33.23913043478261,8.07648339933343,2.925626086956522,415,20,62,6,8,131,66,92,0.0,0.753,0.247,0.9758,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,2,2,1,5,0,0,8,0,12,4,0,3,2,16,16,3,0,4,2,0,1,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,5,6,9,9,2,4,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,0,43,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18766652567872816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427777597694662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815043078994715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904196403809857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16344343807849765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3943119021198615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5702500285595844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936753457518172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5406426962767457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259698090565947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360049930418889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19629690381307865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141090294334105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,talented_sloth,2020/02/24,"I reported my dad to APS for self neglect. I reported my dad to Adult Protective services for self neglect and self harm. I know I did the right thing but, I'm nervous.",1.105882352941176,3.5459963529411773,2.995588235294118,88.72514705882355,85.47058823529412,6.9294117647058835,29.088235294117645,8.07648339933343,2.3270823529411766,132,7,27,3,4,44,22,34,0.263,0.737,0.0,-0.7845,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,3,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,6,0,4,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,15,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637243922321147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25441482880990096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.932360130108564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979191907162999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Adamcz5,2020/02/24,"My(18yo) girlfriend(18yo) has bipolar II disorder. How can I support her? (updated) (first I want to clarify that she told me her psychiatrist thinks she has bipolar disorder, she herself is not sure about it. I don't know the details and from the symptoms, I assume its bipolar II disorder) 

​

She is really nice extroverted girl I wouldn't say she is hyperactive but definitely has energy. Thus I assume she has hypomania and not mania. She is also quite a busy person. We have been dating for 3 months now and I know her for 4 months.

​

Since I knew her, her Depression periods have been in a cycle of a month for +- 4 days during which she doesn't want to see anyone, not even me, doesn't leave her room, doesn't want to do anything. (it gets better closer to the end of the depression period) Sometimes she is not tired at all and doesn't sleep much and sometimes she is very tired but I wouldn't say that anything extreme... just a bit more sleepy than an average person. (I can't recall how often sleep differences happen but it's in a matter of a couple of days a month). She doesn't take any medication, she is going to psychologist sometimes and she knows she has some mental health problems but apparently she is not sure if she has bipolar disorder or if she believes it.

​

I'm quite an emotional guy and it pains me very much seeing her depressed and not being able to do anything. I definitely don't plan on leaving her because of it, I love her and I will do my best to support her no matter what.

​

What kind of relationship should I expect?

Is there anything I can do for her during her depression periods? To make her feel better?

Anything I can do to try to prevent the depression?

Is being alone really best for her?

What I definitely shouldn't do?

Anything other I should know?

​

Thank you very much, everyone.",3.832471910112357,6.1326375140449425,4.890884831460678,79.81222612359551,74.14044943820224,7.9331460674157315,27.69803370786517,8.751876143730069,2.367094382022473,1489,59,267,31,32,487,159,356,0.12300000000000001,0.7070000000000001,0.171,0.9318,1,1,0,0,0,0,67.0,1,1,0,8,9,19,0,0,14,0,45,13,2,4,3,55,68,19,0,12,14,0,1,0,0,6,10,2,1,4,14,10,0,1,9,0,0,1,18,7,0,1,4,5,56,12,28,56,9,21,0,5,2,1,43,6,0,7,14,197,70,0,0.05973528726806857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061867742389671125,0.0,0.047770287646509584,0.0,0.3236157939890644,0.3629245619185837,0.040622043752569816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041768301772442916,0.0,0.2949423098717159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036414076675723606,0.0,0.0,0.06730121293810798,0.12537699722696755,0.10566201450395377,0.06521546239297069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609595917879547,0.0,0.07704863702177485,0.0,0.2572495769650679,0.0,0.0,0.06241066118733705,0.2738472577271716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719415802671996,0.052907734146898894,0.0,0.0,0.0394545938636475,0.0,0.0,0.057079626884136786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03020395608729286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05081080483443348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03120922211450558,0.0,0.03394894035467867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059147325963873634,0.052823717252337296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349581701799223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062205109376027065,0.13131580667923054,0.0,0.0,0.1265020882446012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05391342898075808,0.0,0.03987376810354328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06017701745162469,0.06019911967670383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907205455579561,0.0,0.13173692811682586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356255730412799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431709749007492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715860248877992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270716619428804,0.0,0.0,0.07653590926674869,0.0,0.0,0.06413334321871413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500779606887884,0.0,0.0,0.09520257999787272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04941364691557242,0.0,0.1195568547562682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723917960638064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135573792193247,0.11259960262413606,0.062087835704514274,0.04491350187736138,0.0,0.0,0.05499622682748522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0382759600761945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13731385059780005,0.0,0.057079626884136786,0.0,0.040556338927780114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786360394458614,0.10570026035589818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3629245619185837,0.0
mentalhealth,easilyintrigued22,2020/02/24,"Does therapy and/or meds actually help? Hey guys i (M 25) have been in a predicament with sadness (we'll call it that because I'm not officially diagnosed) as well as with anxiety and rage as well (possibly bipolar?) For as long as i can remember, it became really prominent by the time i was 12. It's just so hard to be happy, i can manage it in short bursts but it seems like it all eventually crashes and burns and i go back to being depressed. I'm married and i love my wife but i feel like we're starting to have a terrible relationship because of how constant my mood changes are and how hard hitting this gloom is that takes over me everything is just so grey when that happens and i lose a sense of purpose. Little things that bare no significance irritate me to the point of rage. I even broke my hand as a teenager by punching a wall over a game of basketball (i know, idiotic) Sometimes i hit the point of snapping and throw things, or hit myself. Or even in some cases i feel like a hot flash and for a split second i just think that it'd be better to just slash my wrists than deal with whatever the problem of the moment is. 

Growing up my Mom took Zoloft for her depression i think? I vaguely remember and i don't think it changed much in her. My question is, even if i was seen about this and got diagnosed, got on the right medicine and maybe went to therapy would that fix it? Or is taking those steps even worth it? Is this something i need to work myself through or something that those things can help with? I really want my life to be happy, i want to be thankful for what i have and just be a better husband/step father. I don't want my marriage to become broken when i know i have a great woman in my life. I just don't remember the last time i was truly and utterly happy or satisfied.",4.232547945205479,5.0960342821917815,5.26619178082192,83.31079452054799,70.56164383561644,8.689315068493151,29.394520547945213,8.954980946260402,2.2383665753424653,1423,54,293,26,25,469,184,365,0.136,0.662,0.20199999999999999,0.9791,0,0,2,0,0,0,33.0,1,0,0,4,20,25,3,0,17,0,30,9,2,2,1,54,59,33,0,7,15,3,6,3,0,2,6,0,0,2,26,17,0,0,12,1,1,6,5,11,2,1,9,8,42,13,44,38,3,31,0,6,2,1,18,15,0,9,13,203,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.08774503695582153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878548722161558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913984711473305,0.0,0.10962390743372974,0.09930514803287664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15904677469091233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181428031179716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19023839268768108,0.0,0.0,0.09716724333723599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092699438816208,0.15488902307598795,0.18252567687367927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868608990608286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375546569015372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08081069514976137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092845373320274,0.1284720042791686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05110132996171257,0.0,0.1438280644243942,0.09913269782229954,0.0,0.08903096794349072,0.07951241414060467,0.2871517341096749,0.1610941337803468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053758722026013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09883095460708577,0.07329353382421391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270206475517865,0.13178523452810148,0.09011944504536658,0.0,0.07957282279538991,0.0,0.1005929946273262,0.0,0.0,0.08115269268878339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033269877575544,0.0,0.09987639620764116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530852226393424,0.0,0.0,0.06609859946053334,0.06667156821593627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999935036100033,0.10136677004712594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603746023922561,0.0,0.0,0.10072648847975613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520497289456084,0.0,0.0,0.09653612451899728,0.3055718701505647,0.07678776526418153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185614145678817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384434459770986,0.08892921452613843,0.0,0.06364300142611053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13521127052525134,0.0,0.0,0.08278256418018651,0.2056535445799308,0.0,0.17920856770525515,0.17284360969918097,0.0,0.0,0.10486147520627176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989997475526173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591043439074905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16169054928209636,0.08335302475033528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06545991254927419,0.0,0.0,0.06387374039256125,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,venusjones1,2020/02/24,"Social anxiety? Today in my history class I was asked a question I knew the answer to because, well, it was right in front of me. It was literally written on paper right in front of me, along with the question asked. As soon as my teacher said my name I looked at the paper of course, kept reading it and nothing was going in... the whole class was silent and the more and more I kept reading it the less my brain was processing. My teacher kept giving me hints and my brain simply wasn’t functioning. I could feel everyone’s eyes staring at me waiting for an answer and my face was going INSANELY hot. As in, so hot that I knew I was BRIGHT red. I felt sick to my stomach. I wanted to cry. I’m not normally like this but on a bad day I swear I could cry all day long. I tend to dwell on things like these.",2.232005163511189,3.8418764518072313,3.67765920826162,89.81445783132533,76.65060240963855,6.670567986230638,23.9053356282272,7.447530270364453,0.9433576592082621,625,20,135,8,14,206,89,166,0.122,0.8340000000000001,0.045,-0.9128,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,9,0,11,6,5,0,1,27,30,10,0,4,2,0,4,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,8,7,0,4,8,2,0,4,2,2,1,0,17,10,24,4,23,11,5,21,0,0,5,0,8,12,0,2,7,90,32,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350203462199145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27741035392393776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12388208759005777,0.09044448937937563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3312581996378954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369214722675529,0.0,0.32595320646767584,0.19137172404146385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177313222781165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501992731765462,0.0,0.14245770281947906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232925960678072,0.16864327510996965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14497139688671007,0.0,0.0,0.1313020762474699,0.12459276325487333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537031772789075,0.14236425235908098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33241492775784914,0.0,0.2968187087549634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534129783359781,0.141133088794984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15124371845897774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856990613298744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14063665662293184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751200037548207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340173242894615,0.0,0.0,0.1656489172093362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marsgetdressed,2020/02/24,"If you need someone to talk to We all can have moments of mental madness, if you ever find yourself there, just DM me. I will be happy to talk it out with yous where possible

Stay blessed

A",6.193846153846158,4.995180307692311,6.538076923076925,82.9194230769231,66.43589743589743,8.825641025641023,34.884615384615394,7.1686216300943375,2.2777076923076924,148,6,31,1,2,48,34,39,0.065,0.764,0.171,0.6908,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,2,0,0,4,3,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,2,10,5,2,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,6,3,1,5,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,2,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28517459286792435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28814584283814204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33560469118489544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177122459496345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23376447087771315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3554131093467405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671224036088898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360297780457815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5067949767731496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_am_on_reddit_now__,2020/02/24,i feel empty and sometimes suicidal for months now i have felt nothin just emptiness and if i do feel anything its deep sadness so bad it makes me suicidal i was wondering if there was a way to feel happy or at least feel something more than empty,1.1983673469387741,3.851836591836737,2.5522448979591843,89.23204081632656,91.24489795918369,5.248979591836736,23.3265306122449,6.868970318607317,1.1284612244897958,199,8,37,3,7,64,38,49,0.366,0.575,0.059000000000000004,-0.9595,0,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,13,11,6,2,2,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,5,5,1,4,8,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,4,2,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200976745628596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20391805922270853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4939509263766242,0.0,0.2344947429074883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599825453432941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16302239213258296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949384334893495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880166922001372,0.2415452264591392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5342860314265226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938548037451226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26485209526276715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,User_Nomi,2020/02/24,"Can poor mental health impair your balance? I’ve often heard of the effects on your brain such as memory loss, slowness and impaired thinking. But can it mess with your balance as well? I’m the worst I’ve ever been in my life, I can absolutely not think right, but lately I’ve also been losing my balance a lot. Falling for no reason. Constantly looking like a fool, stepping out to stop myself from hitting the ground. Can it do something to your balance as well?",3.660477528089889,5.917923853932584,4.393693820224719,83.37683286516854,74.50561797752809,5.798314606741574,27.97893258426966,6.6274283507984215,1.471841573033708,369,15,64,3,8,118,63,89,0.231,0.695,0.07400000000000001,-0.9305,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,4,0,3,6,8,0,0,5,0,7,3,1,2,1,14,13,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,4,0,1,2,2,5,2,0,3,2,8,3,12,9,2,12,0,2,1,0,5,5,0,2,6,47,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851234448005692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25842075998665864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501597697899478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20939706138854694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24606434157940846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611321789285821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635090945198615,0.1130949168978861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19439432203856533,0.2589794617422271,0.0,0.19680555682918566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23328870219452025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380115287137359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19769223682206627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17821325060318022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935370252037174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966604528232067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41627681507065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,highermindwannabe,2020/02/24,"Instagram profiles to follow on topics related to mentalhealth? Hi guys, any suggestions for the profiles you follow? Looking for profiles that are not only about mindfulness and meditation. Maybe some apps for Android that you know off.  Tnx",6.382307692307693,10.257506205128207,5.90841025641026,66.59492307692311,76.69230769230771,9.273846153846154,36.0051282051282,9.3871,5.0519805128205135,198,11,24,6,5,61,31,39,0.0,0.9390000000000001,0.061,0.3527,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,8,5,1,4,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,1,0,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30239251732836114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4402956409677296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443803516423573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734128679137809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4467332482901977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4489924168807025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381934391319707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Savvy-Reed,2020/02/24,"I don't know why I hate myself It's that straight forward,I don't know why I hate myself,I don't know what I did to make me hate who I am but I do.Ive tierd so hard to get better but it keeps going right back to the way it was.I was getting better and then last night it all just crashed and I have no idea why just the day before I was happy and now im just not,im right back to hateing everything about myself.I doing know whats wrong with me and I don't want how to fix it",-1.5204326923076898,0.24196458035714485,1.0450000000000017,102.91538461538464,90.69642857142857,3.803296703296703,13.97252747252747,4.713530739802397,-1.4573648351648352,371,6,99,1,13,126,61,112,0.096,0.72,0.184,0.863,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,9,8,4,0,2,0,10,0,0,2,1,20,24,9,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,5,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,1,12,3,7,21,1,12,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,7,57,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125280669386979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759444010159027,0.0,0.0,0.24444589472263495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912485296805757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12420146662785622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14440319464271228,0.0,0.07853985312360544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471119899622971,0.12379628490748253,0.545758934004243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560062275344839,0.2985503390192679,0.0,0.0,0.12283476934041647,0.0,0.0,0.30379517185646643,0.11264801494944987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224676404091063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968738883317474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23603690197720226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151145845052374,0.10969338693502848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3741006209781845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109540384130907,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deputy420dong69,2020/02/24,"Need my meds My doctor has been giving me samples of rexulti (it’s over $1000 for a 30 day script and my insurance won’t cover any of it) but I ran out three days ago. I’ve called the doctor 4 times now I even called them and told them I was going to run out but they won’t do anything and I’m going crazy and bouncing back and forth between wanting to kill myself and being scared to die. I don’t know what to do, I just left the doctor’s assistant another voicemail about an hour ago but no call back and their office closes in an hour. Someone please tell me what I should do",2.817517921146951,3.721828153225808,4.057526881720431,90.5118458781362,73.91935483870971,6.801433691756272,22.648745519713263,6.937597516519254,0.5135637992831543,457,11,102,4,9,150,82,124,0.17,0.7929999999999999,0.037000000000000005,-0.9638,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,4,0,6,2,1,1,5,0,11,3,0,0,0,18,20,10,2,3,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,4,10,0,0,1,0,0,4,4,2,0,1,4,1,16,0,13,12,0,20,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,10,66,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625149973574789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006945016035284,0.15526711810335556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12185120093589193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277175054396172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4535962924890741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19098926069292066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367606658240549,0.0,0.0,0.4546759941816869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780061016300502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420448094065354,0.16830623539299513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916435302216289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16382048418960915,0.0,0.08137687376569963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16088140259117756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447536945635252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979401771518434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16253933979102467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14824658648662042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546150321234814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12942205091186354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634237182743977,0.0,0.0,0.1414897934683533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873371044609003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowAwayStudyBoi,2020/02/24,"I've never had (or realised I had?) extended mental health problems before. Quick question. I'm not feeling suicidal or anything like that. But I came to university for the first time about 4 or 5 months ago (I live in the UK so we live away from home and I live *quite* far from home) and recently I've been finding things quite difficult. I was quite upset a little bit earlier today and reached out to my academic supervisor for help and I've never had to do that before. But now I feel a little bit better after chatting to my girlfriend about it. And my feels in general over the last couple weeks have been oscillating a bit. My question is:

Is it common to feel as though I had 'mistakenly' thought I have depression when I don't really, once starting to cheer up a bit? Like I said, I don't feel as bad right now as I did a few hours ago and I start to doubt whether what I have is something ongoing at all. I think this might have happened to me a couple of times. I certainly feel as though I've had some noticeable, reoccurring issues in the last few weeks but can't actually recall them. 

Hopefully you understand what I mean. I'm ""new"" to this so I'm just wondering if anyone else has experienced the same thing.",3.040652557319224,4.968099226337452,4.6076308054085855,82.63814814814816,75.2551440329218,8.249970605526162,26.386243386243386,8.976282227363876,2.1493724867724864,964,36,192,22,21,323,136,243,0.049,0.86,0.091,0.8107,0,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,1,1,1,5,11,12,0,2,11,0,22,1,0,0,4,44,42,23,1,3,10,0,6,2,1,1,1,1,2,0,10,9,0,0,14,1,0,1,6,6,0,1,12,8,25,6,29,29,9,37,0,1,0,0,9,12,0,11,26,129,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0892603931155524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16216321515472312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395713955143864,0.09372063567249296,0.07527106151318518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593798597134948,0.0,0.07637266058515517,0.0,0.0,0.1556664913594369,0.0,0.0,0.0808967556753057,0.3994411314017735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046159851653984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20241706296871406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878197769753911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641047863588303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774963624336309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08360086248836554,0.07780334841530016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088559296328501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972270994419897,0.0,0.0,0.06130963524408645,0.0,0.18350140848504806,0.09084919662999208,0.0900783822179324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546970441073864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911862525674902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937410972297101,0.1833516144315932,0.2423059840165328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09963638156206626,0.0,0.0,0.09217907682751156,0.09703398433725567,0.0,0.0,0.07300955527251309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410928162727846,0.08834117546668026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413788037479577,0.0,0.09741132917739877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752332656129183,0.0,0.0,0.2049320684286448,0.2918651107791509,0.0,0.0,0.0585972809756325,0.0,0.09031444442907817,0.0,0.0,0.07811388942028202,0.08700781281263241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041718164874335,0.0,0.0,0.12948423120976055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005206475842944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12153566559059865,0.05860953920021651,0.17973534140083908,0.07261604164039305,0.10667243213198707,0.0,0.08670176496893484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522228806384833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467415719600435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991940549742048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Leeuweroni,2020/02/24,"Writing a poc character in a mental health themed story (help) Hi guys,

First want to start of by introducing myself, im a illustration student from the Netherlands in my final year. Im currently making a graphic novel for my graduation project with a focus on mental health and how difficult the recovery process can be. I myself have had an eating disorder, depression and I have ADHD. Now that im feeling better I decided I wanted to channel this experience into a graphic novel.

I want the story to be inclusive. Its not going to be purely autbiographical but the main character is going to be white, as I am white and basing it on personal experiences but changing a lot of things The main character will have a friend who is POC (not decided on her ethnicity yet, still very early stages). Ive noticed that a lot of mental health stories always have the kinda frail, thin white girl in it.  I want to make something that shows more than just that demographic.

The main character is going to have a lot of struggles and gets kinda caught up in it, kinda forgetting that her friend struggles too. I want to represent the (female) POC experience as accurately as possible within the story, I want to make a character that stands up and calls her friend out when its needed. I want the main character to become more aware of her position in the friendship and better herself because of it. I want the friend to be her own autonomous person without any tokenism, not her to be there in the story just as a filler position as a friend. I want to represent a friendship that isnt just roses and sunshine, but mature enough to work it out and learn from eachother.

If anything sounds irky or not right please say so. I really just want to ask, as a white person, how can I represent a POC best in a mental health narrative? POC, how was your experience in your mental health journey? How do you think it differs in how the people around you act or treat you? Im very open to having a conversation about this and I would be supe r thankful if someone could help me out. Thanks in advance!",6.282208121827412,7.079883332487313,7.088379695431472,72.31271167512692,65.92893401015229,10.060345177664976,32.25746192893401,10.078955797065145,3.3266709847715736,1659,65,288,37,25,552,183,394,0.036000000000000004,0.7659999999999999,0.198,0.9964,1,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,5,0,6,18,16,0,2,33,0,27,6,0,8,1,67,52,29,0,15,16,0,2,0,5,2,5,2,0,5,19,16,1,0,5,4,0,7,6,4,0,1,3,9,33,12,57,39,12,43,0,1,5,0,31,24,0,10,10,217,52,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405985271803132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819953514104626,0.0,0.0,0.04756474676753709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05755847065668269,0.0622655496446317,0.06538878703199477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042637597123480565,0.07724834834359515,0.0,0.0,0.07340257373433666,0.12372068213604966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142128730420003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07399214400142884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055845095448951325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06024320715584591,0.0,0.0,0.07307725118538498,0.08016260546931102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157081798134372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227149996146981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736770770662431,0.0,0.0,0.035366106427843415,0.0,0.0,0.0766209230793747,0.0,0.05949486637662555,0.0,0.0,0.270195237391512,0.0,0.03654318221235156,0.0,0.11925343496985122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925618018100442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3717393535951292,0.0,0.0,0.09376482197080524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022088109708186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783932690369142,0.0,0.0,0.14006575056129858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.352438678429361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051863056731493176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963242461715311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048490799453089616,0.1832188585535901,0.0,0.07677819954224639,0.0,0.07885206072572491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04480832088446804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059732331678211785,0.0,0.05562277698881346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0592638578506135,0.053846793205453984,0.0,0.0,0.04950716897545411,0.0,0.05585787170941932,0.0,0.0,0.14624262734844584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287912355248684,0.0,0.0,0.04646810408281203,0.044817694535454734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542328955838932,0.4125515485889343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742412714723804,0.0,0.05092052353090005,0.0,0.0,0.049686658200432915,0.0,0.0,0.04504204836641453
mentalhealth,asdfgcmd,2020/02/24,"Are thoughts of suicide a normal thing? Like... is thinking that it might be worth it to end it so you don't have to worry about the future a normal thing for you to do?

I feel like there is like a little thought in the back of my mind saying what would I be actually missing out on. Sometimes i don't hear it and sometimes it's pretty much the only thing i can think about.

I just need to hear someone honestly tell me if I should be worried or if this is commonplace. I very very rarely feel like actively doing it but a lot of the time it's just like... but what if though?",3.5711776859504134,4.0130390413223145,4.546766528925623,89.4037861570248,71.80991735537191,7.372314049586778,25.868801652892564,7.1686216300943375,0.9575363636363629,448,13,101,4,8,146,72,121,0.064,0.823,0.113,0.5591,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,2,0,0,8,7,0,0,8,0,16,0,0,0,0,24,26,9,1,8,8,0,2,5,0,3,0,3,0,0,14,2,0,0,6,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,5,11,6,13,18,2,8,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,6,9,77,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.13681665078816552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078064657150502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241771065859308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178040072382794,0.2003202683060988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31603504768732843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.342477383659998,0.1405189520656662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11919448555493545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873186512262285,0.1415637664671238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306439331186157,0.1039577961622126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747358287024117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662972299309993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263554892487962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149403210297047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187924592666608,0.0,0.2773261647793132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335792199534778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254247970497838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27943137158084586,0.17967119744208615,0.13774747444197455,0.2226090041497137,0.08175274825886612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313621981520567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847632969536221,0.0,0.0995952766903838,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Need_Coffee,2020/02/24,"Inpatient treatment for teenage son. Should we do it? My 16 y/o son has had depression, anxiety, and PTSD for over two years and has become marijuana dependent over the past year and a half. He's gone from an A/B student in 9th grade to failing all of his classes now in 11th grade. He's been seeing two different therapists for over two years and does not seem to want to take any treatment seriously. Because of his consistent use of marijuana, his failing grades, and his resistance to weekly outpatient therapy, his therapist has suggested we admit him to a teen inpatient facility that uses a cognitive behavioral therapy approach. Can anyone help me work through the pros and cons of an inpatient facility for teens like this?",7.776484962406016,8.503059533834588,8.283223684210531,65.28694078947372,62.684210526315795,13.266541353383458,40.68515037593985,12.602617957971056,5.841166165413531,590,32,97,22,8,196,89,133,0.11,0.84,0.05,-0.8064,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,2,0,0,3,1,5,0,0,7,0,8,0,0,3,1,17,16,6,0,2,1,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,4,0,4,3,1,10,1,20,12,1,13,0,3,1,0,15,5,0,2,7,61,13,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100687289258427,0.0,0.12382063289189214,0.0,0.0,0.11317460818777675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986669001470788,0.17875901989671225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940772712335284,0.0,0.0,0.1691067586395635,0.0,0.0,0.141642690129813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084897479085103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790754552264923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545114086382786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892028910307446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289795638379691,0.14734909427351892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169678348438286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701965788845351,0.3758583337168181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4743341147591815,0.0,0.0,0.279586023501507,0.0,0.0,0.09546781525296306,0.0,0.12983241611422885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783427185425226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126929931617686
mentalhealth,Hawaiian_honda_civic,2020/02/24,This is it I've given up and I'm going to kill myself tonight,-3.5440000000000005,-2.510746733333331,0.5199999999999996,100.24000000000002,116.33333333333334,2.0,11.666666666666668,3.1291,-1.790333333333333,49,1,12,0,3,18,14,15,0.281,0.7190000000000001,0.0,-0.6908,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4569296516007866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8895028350084015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HealthShmealth,2020/02/24,"I seem to seek out content that I know will stress me out Hey all, just a bit of a vent here. 

I’m 32 years old, and have had my ups and downs with mental health over the years. I’ve delved pretty deeply into caring for myself through a few years in alcohol treatment / therapy, so I like to think I’ve gained some perspective and know when to take an internal inventory and run a bit of a systems check. 

More to the point: I seem to seek out content that I know habitually causes me stress. I’ll spend an hour or so browsing the subs like trashy / Iamatotalpieceofshit / public freak outs, and invariably I end up feeling tense, high strung, and unfortunately angry. I wind up getting so pissed at the ways I see people mistreat each other, lash out violently, or otherwise be so obtuse to their own surroundings that they make an entire room subject to their bullshit. 

On the whole I’m *not* a generally angry person or someone who adopts a “doom and gloom” mindset about others. I think part of it is that I live in a fairly rough area, or at least one in which a *lot* of the sort of behavior I find on those subreddits seems to exist. This leaves me with encountering situations that cause me duress on my commute to / from work, going to the grocery store, or just going *anywhere*. 


I’m aware that a pretty simple solution to this is to occupy my time in other ways when I feel that tendency to start seeking this content out. I know the triggers pretty well by now as well. If I have a bad day, or if I’m otherwise generally feeling fed up with “other people”, it seems like that leads me to finding all of this to almost legitimize why I’m feeling angry. 

With that said, I guess I needed to write this down to get it out of my system a bit. I’m also curious if anyone else seems to do this. One person put it to me as a form of “mental cutting”, and while it was said mostly in jest, it did make me think a little harder about it. 

Anyway, good luck with whatever is going on in your world.",4.7717454119484595,5.497517263959391,5.833705583756345,80.22846544318628,69.25380710659898,8.59960952752831,27.08278016399845,8.730908602173464,1.8691545490042945,1558,47,309,25,26,518,205,394,0.114,0.774,0.111,-0.7322,0,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,3,3,16,17,3,2,25,0,11,4,1,6,2,71,49,27,0,4,12,0,5,3,0,1,2,2,1,2,29,22,2,0,18,0,3,6,1,9,2,2,6,8,32,8,67,41,16,57,1,2,1,0,12,34,1,21,16,212,61,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465832774273207,0.08869374682698522,0.0,0.0,0.07083234049301802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061932777019335715,0.09075420307918293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395532369907917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900985569823777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903067706484919,0.1819791377419821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571226965643787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07399194473809782,0.0,0.07844999108103637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914205730914104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190947911145676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255218489346527,0.0,0.15101539185030188,0.0742914010612167,0.0,0.0,0.09757389522847908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414968074259476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935829567422994,0.0,0.0,0.0872272337270314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19471111414792192,0.0,0.0,0.0937867388817588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981787915145826,0.08877409724987965,0.07821218284513418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753021759467606,0.0,0.0,0.11824723936977112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17852287488295193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06567626196126711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294317824770633,0.0,0.1200396367588158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591666480740713,0.0,0.1228116755277371,0.15467824316524156,0.0,0.0,0.08373075785013241,0.0,0.0,0.2703338283998154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904101336605595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16850770711942048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058175588268442,0.40317076178879735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956052825198088,0.0,0.0,0.07504819226493224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269290711934147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20292170407415508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659638479157275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012917232076314,0.0,0.0,0.17026331452364218,0.0,0.0,0.05164802553456263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061133002383408,0.0,0.0,0.15927675252693174,0.0,0.07992397011991473,0.0988893514061318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448269449165522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17111563919766296
mentalhealth,thrwaway1098437,2020/02/24,"Need help, don't know where to go Hi guys, well I’m in a bit of trouble and I don’t know what to do or who to speak to or where to get help. I think I may have a condition of something because I always have these odd feelings. 

So let me list out the problems:

 \- Recently I have been a lot fo trouble sleeping (I think too much and get a little anxious)

\-Sometimes recently I have been hearing my parents or sister calling me in the house when no one actually said anything.

\- Recently I have been having periods where I feel very low, contemplate about the whole purpose of my life.

\- Part of the the previous point is that I get anxious about the future as in I do not know what path I will take or whatever.

\- At some times I start to feel very anxious.

\- I do not not know how to cope with my problems as I don’t speak to anyone about it.

\- At times I feel like I don’t want to be around my friends or around people in general.

\- I get paranoid sometimes that people are out to get me.

To note: I also get very anxious when I’m paranoid.

​

So where can I get anonymous help for a doctor or gp that can help me, because I don’t want my parents to know about any of this. I am living in London by the way if that helps.

​

TL;DR: I have a lot of mental problems right now, I would like to seek medical help but I am a teen so I want something anonymous that can help me. Are there any anonymous places in London where I can go for medical help without my parents knowing.",1.8526580796252927,3.749307688524592,3.3211651053864166,90.65284836065577,78.672131147541,6.062060889929741,25.97482435597189,7.021680442328713,1.1004496487119442,1155,46,245,13,28,379,135,305,0.07400000000000001,0.828,0.098,0.8076,3,0,2,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,0,0,22,10,0,0,14,0,32,5,1,1,0,45,63,19,0,9,12,4,4,2,1,3,4,4,0,1,11,7,0,0,12,0,0,2,10,6,1,1,4,8,38,4,42,54,7,36,0,1,0,0,21,22,0,11,13,174,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.07143896173973349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058543193494126226,0.06091365361017882,0.1586383752633014,0.17790776567553768,0.09956582992052887,0.0,0.0,0.3308099280751682,0.0,0.051187671103836194,0.0,0.060242693269212624,0.13033857104557986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925197823851076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992251296312969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475199835699052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492993159958683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14806157824219654,0.05229872205163786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056559142809987466,0.0,0.26773154053404874,0.0,0.0832098562525496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724859220900299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250902046676473,0.0,0.3925500691720499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447044598091219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24139419264585005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485858298876669,0.0517078999304371,0.07152997406987227,0.07337212234400707,0.06464266071162797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244750583221088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749564845156574,0.07377491082925977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05381518410310185,0.05428167536477742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04960660365605655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438613891094408,0.07927548105917501,0.0,0.10150430768932253,0.0,0.07648518763427611,0.0,0.06920378352757256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101461362415925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21684769408628232,0.0,0.0,0.0625179316700208,0.06963612408174047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325934620007221,0.0,0.0,0.11271584562958728,0.14480615598295352,0.0,0.0518159214654028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05504216031442066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381550948554246,0.0,0.0,0.08537457131626236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18120903186772525,0.12953723117987145,0.05810789424544835,0.0,0.0,0.06582141488900366,0.0,0.0,0.08173241761577077,0.0,0.07056843179352032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05200378111841585,0.0,0.17790776567553768,0.0
mentalhealth,Wtfismylife2019,2020/02/24,"28M - my dog died but I hardly felt anything? I've been depressed a while and feeling dead inside. Been on meds on and off since last year sometime, maybe year before. But my dog had to be put down last week. And my parents were quite emotional about it. I was gutted, she was mine and I loved her a lot. But I hardly felt anything. I buried her in the garden the next day and didn't even shed a tear. Am I too emotionally damaged to feel anymore? Am I a psychopath? Have I got a strong character or is it just because of my depression? 

I hardly get nervous, shy, anything anymore and I wouldn't mind but never really enjoy anything either. It sucks. I get glimpses some days where I 'feel' again but 99% of the time I feel nothing.",1.3308928571428602,3.658237068027212,2.682920918367348,92.19132015306124,83.08163265306123,5.035544217687075,22.792942176870746,6.322622252153567,0.4812860544217683,567,20,117,5,16,183,93,147,0.212,0.701,0.087,-0.9683,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,6,8,1,1,8,0,13,2,1,0,1,25,24,13,2,1,8,1,9,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,0,6,1,0,1,3,5,0,0,10,9,21,3,10,12,3,19,0,3,0,1,5,6,1,3,12,77,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519068706897869,0.0,0.0,0.4180525357963021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742021024173383,0.0,0.1080707016466187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638136188426727,0.0,0.21877601357949988,0.0,0.1318096761306773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857238912177674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388467402668562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25686732647204674,0.0,0.2438867282798439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270826878863742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10157637368591088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413108143456033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070497551443541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797391133893754,0.11462569938854922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759217755761865,0.0,0.14107235864141654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12823742221096718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795299886787692,0.0,0.13506975980545358,0.0,0.0,0.12186337082755044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102245789436813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12767368753743516,0.0,0.135083952162146,0.0,0.0,0.08136175247887431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505868285724967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256097989283585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740568152219504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187461992595563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16357229719804134
mentalhealth,peachsmoothie14,2020/02/24,"I was recently diagnosed with depression, and i cant stop eating I need help, I'm very athletic and smart, but the only thing that makes me feel okay is eating, and I don't know how to stop, if you have any suggestions please comment",8.85936170212766,6.084257170212768,8.88989361702128,73.18250000000003,62.40425531914893,13.655319148936169,36.26595744680851,12.161744961471696,4.1246255319148935,185,6,38,5,2,61,39,47,0.049,0.684,0.267,0.8204,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,5,3,0,2,0,13,10,6,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,2,2,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,6,2,2,9,0,3,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17499418717874668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22163917156546625,0.2611859704987697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5266285629386014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13011449589470744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17248382385943448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414226164587033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717707184191581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908079843605318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957121376975737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824726196400757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25408372864802425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43028117269816185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709595584194077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21232536816061487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crazypugladyx,2020/02/24,What do you find are the differences between mental health experiences of men and women? I'm currently tutoring a student writing a paper on the issues of gender and mental health. Looking for some personal experiences at how sex affects the way you are treated for having mental health issues. Thanks!,7.533076923076923,9.965617692307696,7.860769230769232,61.85923076923081,64.38461538461539,9.815384615384616,36.07692307692308,10.125756701596842,4.574946153846153,248,12,31,6,4,81,38,52,0.0,0.938,0.062,0.4926,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,4,4,0,2,0,7,7,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,7,7,1,4,0,0,1,1,6,2,0,1,1,23,3,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18364579092474034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3438802257921613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606537026591231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5605167121213437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669235232469439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760538584437813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5314147327882084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15347855247065573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182853027775926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13952074287511196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saddest_cookie,2020/02/24,"Mania Soo, ... :D
Is it possible that I’m experiencing mania right now? I was on escitalopram and felt emotionally blunt so I went to my psychiatrist and told him that I want to change to something different and he gave me 10mg vortioxetine and 15mg mirtazapine. The vortioxetine gave me weird gastrointestinal symptoms so I decided to stop it and just took the Mirtazapine. Now Im also a beginner alcoholic lately I feel, I drank everyday and smoked weed. Now I finally havent drank alcohol or smoked during the day and Ive accomplished more than I have in a month. Ive also switched to keto diet today. I drank half of a vodka and smoked a lot of weed and I feel like moving or even dancing xD Idk whether Im just drunk or Im manic because I havent felt so good in months (and Ive done meth once during that time after not doing it for months(I was never addicted to it tho)) . I feel like I can accomplish anything finally after months of depression. Idk. 😌",2.10936507936508,4.680007026455026,4.589841269841274,78.18571428571431,81.91005291005291,8.256084656084656,24.87301587301588,8.976282227363876,2.44948253968254,764,30,144,22,21,267,107,189,0.071,0.8,0.128,0.9102,1,0,8,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,12,5,0,0,7,0,12,9,0,0,1,27,27,20,0,1,7,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,7,10,7,1,6,3,0,4,4,2,0,1,13,6,20,3,16,14,2,26,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,4,20,90,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070994812200852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758821670568987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20644120870206611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106217082394146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868244439234988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654340649175686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324219163867733,0.0,0.11117143359015164,0.0,0.0,0.13485508426020948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208773715326474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451911207171396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525230271096812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19579140641935605,0.1844212922036234,0.2478629788784362,0.2827889902906088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108261328967093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182669093996872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560133835856254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611828484291224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973428318295676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090774246586944,0.13718546525576664,0.0,0.0,0.0995499929853075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745982811132018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455117854157252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022867569401718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936763790474697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791182460627703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341575326422779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526421366438732,0.0,0.12234726504833553,0.123335945278583,0.14340620385621305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613131712563274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196530918917872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,poubellehumaine,2020/02/24,"What would happen if I discuss suicidal ideation with therapist? I know that there are many variables and that different therapists will act differently depending on the situation, but does anyone have any experience with this? I haven't done any real serious planning, the most serious thing I have done is look-up some drug overdose information.",9.045172413793104,11.152441965517244,8.578793103448279,59.38301724137932,60.3793103448276,13.386206896551723,42.086206896551715,12.602617957971056,6.541986206896553,286,16,40,11,4,91,47,58,0.109,0.8909999999999999,0.0,-0.6136,2,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,9,1,0,1,0,12,11,3,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,3,7,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,4,0,29,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623656797304096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488450941145222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4030918691481175,0.0,0.0,0.16881352695455254,0.3948200629790035,0.0,0.0,0.22370996339246585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18869929209872927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17058632705942678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601620972284242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199263423554988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19557662213866456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21956950292075467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21683466584779199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21100808705945384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4479579630395787,0.12815831621110596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703503895437766,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mxdisontxylor,2020/02/24,"Help with making myself Happy. I've always struggled with being alone. I never felt happy unless I was in a friend group or romantic relationship. This led to me being used, decieved, mistreated, all of that because id rather be with anyone than be alone.
 I'm now in a decent relationship, although it does have its problems.

I don't know If i'm unhappy because we're incompatible or if Its because I've never really been happy. I just want to know why I can't be happy without someone helping me be.",3.9194897959183663,5.78329967346939,6.044642857142858,73.54410714285714,72.6734693877551,7.757142857142857,28.5765306122449,8.472884824447931,2.437281632653061,400,16,67,7,8,140,64,98,0.21600000000000005,0.655,0.129,-0.8009999999999999,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,2,0,11,0,0,3,3,22,19,6,0,5,8,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,3,1,8,5,11,10,1,6,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,4,3,48,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30658902013151546,0.0,0.0,0.12315680954853575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349256509405648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706779572629396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952521385393373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14211354117184616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435274632933992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6302408267835966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19841698552788856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16268568620133714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879833189013827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283100459905802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162630841405582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948194831450831,0.0,0.0,0.31781633038005314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540903697479758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547329833527107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783377473067853,0.0,0.0,0.0873005813111508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335566896609252,0.0,0.0,0.14267709125037828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunflowrbaby,2020/02/24,"So I am in the process of reaching out to get the help I need. My mental health has gradually gotten worse over the course of being ignored for years and now interferes with my daily life. Has anyone been to inpatient treatment or outpatient and if so how was your experience? Well I have run from my demons for as long as I could and I don’t think I can run anymore. I have been diagnosed with depression, anxiety, and ptsd while also having other conditions that were suspected. 

I’m just really scared to take these next steps into recovery, the trauma I have to deal with is one that will be very hard for me and I know that I should probably look into something more aggressive in order to get the help I need but I’ve only heard bad things about the living programs. I just don’t want to be locked up with no freedom and no way to see my loved ones. So I’m just looking for some advice! Thanks!",4.8157076350093115,5.669398536312853,5.521354748603353,82.04542132216018,69.22346368715084,9.095158286778398,27.207169459962763,9.2995712137729,2.1324744878957174,714,22,142,14,12,232,117,179,0.139,0.741,0.121,0.4008,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,11,9,1,1,6,0,21,4,0,1,0,31,38,17,0,6,6,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,6,13,0,2,3,0,0,3,4,6,1,2,6,5,18,3,28,26,2,17,1,1,3,1,6,7,0,3,5,105,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15911994921971534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021865840837982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456791579769558,0.0,0.1614880288705956,0.11385764015179173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595997205825516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001006592692566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16787517767733878,0.14024908133858405,0.16527354872448227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15928334684554074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701485686581165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586769173851918,0.0,0.0,0.17308541593492086,0.0,0.0,0.2182890115604547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948956043617727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501479431134627,0.0,0.0,0.1437858109783649,0.14410337253010258,0.27347987009790875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14696445715421078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16409883607302594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414793768594025,0.0,0.0,0.17317629496392958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22068168785278272,0.12384294402935735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556308821434113,0.0,0.19034476926940055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431592435166877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16302570063146415,0.0,0.1297579819497409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535792227258272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243124852357015,0.0,0.0,0.14991609278118595,0.0,0.0,0.10817997940084242,0.10433774666163097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435548246762474,0.09604398309128467,0.1292504146077628,0.0,0.0,0.14640773469673082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659422255378708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486005316177303
mentalhealth,Brexa101,2020/02/24,"AITA for throwing my sister's blade away? Ok so hear me out. I (16F) have a sister (14F) who has struggled with depression and cutting. She didn't tell me for the majority of the time but revealed to me in November that she had been depressed but had recently thrown her blade away. She told me she was getting better and I believed her. I told her I'd always be there for her, and she seemed like she was genuinely better.

 But yesterday I saw a glimpse of her arm and thought I saw two fresh cuts. I didn't say anything at the time, as we were about to leave for church and I didn't want to jump to conclusions. But afterwards I told her that that she could always talk to me and she shouldn't be scared to. She got really defensive and said she was fine. Later I remembered where she said she used to keep her blade and looked, and sure enough there was a broken pice of glass. She said she always got her blades from a broken mirror in our garage. 

That night I told her that I found her blade, and she said it was an old one and that she had been clean since November. I told her she shouldn't be afraid to tell me anything, and asked if I could throw it away. She said yes. I asked her if she was lying and she said she wasn't. So I threw it away. 

I have no idea if she was telling the truth. She didn't seem nervous at all when I asked her but she could be a good liar. She also could very easily get a new blade. I can't get parents involved because our parents are super religious and would probably just tell her she needs to pray more. Any other adults would tell our parents. And we're homeschooled, so we don't have school counselors. I know taking someone's blade away can often make it a lot worse, and I don't think I thought it through. What if I'm responsible for her relapsing even further? 

TL:DR I threw away my sister's old self harming blade, but I think she might be lying when she said she was clean and that I've hurt her.",2.9380910626659187,4.258266433915209,3.4912476872335283,93.07156865899769,74.18703241895261,6.869954146890838,22.910546215107388,7.359569317364363,0.5967156463679513,1524,40,344,17,31,477,177,401,0.124,0.737,0.139,0.6794,3,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,5,0,0,4,13,21,4,4,12,2,42,1,1,2,3,64,83,34,0,14,11,6,0,1,0,5,0,9,2,2,15,21,0,2,12,0,0,5,11,12,0,2,40,12,81,9,33,29,5,30,2,3,3,0,83,13,0,9,13,229,96,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054340780552245775,0.16962324495323355,0.0,0.0,0.04620934212238124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183656987031253,0.0,0.1905764060321578,0.0,0.3830559598624185,0.0,0.0,0.041422596495349566,0.0,0.0,0.0765580578084903,0.0,0.12019513856302046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217014936214807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170530344088328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021205187402592,0.0,0.04488131708118585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07450529946009446,0.0,0.0,0.10650554394900487,0.0,0.0,0.05699448435399914,0.10869402517804634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658626574949429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274347350935109,0.07670895907856325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060398404882112726,0.0,0.0,0.03734436082215317,0.0,0.0,0.07195081456876032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03319766476549277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057062136056728115,0.0,0.0,0.05776992528762855,0.0,0.0,0.045358146016190086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07208579068084071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050385167479829504,0.0,0.06562797072268134,0.0,0.063767868502626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14260731236135596,0.0,0.046045686993253336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22635625834268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732631971972163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04353146332932822,0.0,0.06709389685517966,0.0,0.07697578976391319,0.0,0.4524619819945656,0.05403775077863377,0.06803129390726713,0.06877053380117132,0.0,0.1237209655304632,0.07088822184703605,0.0,0.0,0.05621017321886431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057575075429187876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103764930198701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404347344259012,0.0,0.051091062448917514,0.054616832247380516,0.2969629787887536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708113973766206,0.0,0.10789178272979144,0.0792461184254416,0.0,0.0,0.32465279479446274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637873022043426,0.0,0.0,0.05868826840601379,0.0,0.05606709420909278,0.04007954829452648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924837171970452,0.09654157516796172,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Typhlojian,2020/02/24,"Was admitted to the ER psychiatric ward. It was a terrible experience, and made me feel worse about life. (Posting in other subreddits)
Im 23, Male student with anxiety, depression , and consistent suicidal ideation. About 2 weeks ago, I was crumpling so badly under the pressure of school and life, I ended up seeing the school counselor desperately. I told her EVERYTHING on my mind, including my nihilism and thoughts of death vs suffering through life. She ended up admitting me to the emergency room, and I stayed there for like not even  6 hours. When I was admitted, I agreed because I was genuinely hopeful I would stay there for a couple of days and get some serious psychiatric help. But no, instead that stupid bitch of a psychiatrist basically guilt tripped me by bringing up how my parents can't support me forever, and we basically argued about whether or not I was actually in crisis and if I'm just desperate for attention. Regardless if she's right, I still fucking hate her. So despite explaining to them my thoughts of suicide in the future depending on whether or not life for me sinks to a lower level, I was seen as a whiney spoiled child that didn't want to deal with life... Something I've heard and been told many times.  Worst part, the hospital and ambulance Bill's are in the 1000's. 
Only barely good news is that my parents and I decided for me to drop down to a part time status, which means more tolerable school work, but an extra semester in career training, and losing the grant that helped pay for the classes.

Overall, I feel worse about life and myself than I did before. Thanks hospital",8.366258389261745,8.182049744966445,8.106635906040271,70.11518875838928,61.61744966442953,12.147986577181209,39.76593959731544,11.578365685549247,4.806717449664429,1296,63,223,35,16,415,181,298,0.2,0.7390000000000001,0.06,-0.9855,3,0,1,0,0,1,36.0,1,0,1,2,14,19,5,2,16,0,14,7,0,3,0,50,38,26,3,6,13,2,2,1,0,1,6,1,1,2,7,16,0,0,11,0,2,2,6,14,1,0,17,5,32,5,40,20,6,32,0,3,2,1,21,15,2,7,12,150,39,8,0.0,0.0,0.10100776269623384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175258467214076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791824633195372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642390322972111,0.06309682012827189,0.0,0.08807671280718195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452837002154155,0.0,0.0667533607206976,0.1067110259778672,0.0891503054183448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833527080524263,0.0,0.0,0.06836530373728379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930252901154342,0.10124956886565707,0.0,0.0,0.10467235521985234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569042264823713,0.05407806139473157,0.0,0.0,0.08681664192614352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219159351989512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387569306290303,0.0,0.0,0.10280566524579704,0.10193340559626393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180516887350384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4386597306429735,0.05056822265166625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157976984537172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794069205264848,0.0,0.1049397083131647,0.0,0.11274931280779983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451242043510947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872162996540635,0.0,0.0,0.22986423395195546,0.2241756818254901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913095835159252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839429147068091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31426339982320306,0.08248156501902876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968463643786679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22064907792989524,0.082660710775758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264394063625701,0.1174583562327141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529520857468013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643457673877233,0.1207113629565733,0.0,0.0,0.19781047766608972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06105102681928784,0.0,0.08302695832307433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535422563241204,0.0,0.21096466297396133,0.07352830240804438,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Btn87,2020/02/24,"I think I’m done I don’t really know where to start, but without anyone else to talk to, I’m hoping Reddit can be my sounding board. I’m sorry if this triggers anything in anyone. 

My mental health over the last few years has spiralled, with every element of my life becoming nothing but day to day mediocrity. I don’t mean that to sound harsh but after years, life’s becoming mundane and the absence of joy is debilitating. 

My job has changed into something I don’t want really want to do, it’s a big step back with little room to manoeuvre or advance. Fortunately my boss likes me, but that’s only going to last so long. People might think that’s awesome, you can get away with murder, but when you actually want to be good at something, it’s not enough. 

I’ve gotten lazy and that’s reflected in my body. I’ve gained a few KGs and that’s affected my confidence, my energy, my enthusiasm. As well as how my OH sees me. I’m back at the gym 5 days a week, and I’m trying my best with a diet but after a long day of crap, last thing you want is a carrot stick. 

I don’t have many friends, mostly colleagues. My family and school friends all live 200 miles away, and whilst I speak to my mum every week, I feel like I’m missing my nieces and nephews grow up, I’m missing those dinners, those afternoon drinks on a Sunday, those birthday parties. They’re so growing up and moving on without me. 

And my relationship. We’ve been together 10 years last week, a third of my life. I love him more than anything but it’s gotten hard. He’s in a new job so I’m trying to help out as much as possible. I sort out our dogs at lunchtimes, the house is cleaned, washing done, dinner cooked, coffee waiting for him everyday. It’s exhausting but I’m trying. He’s not interested in sex anymore. It’s been a best part of a year since we had sex. 6 months since we were intimate. He says it’s him, but I have a high sex drive and it makes me feel like a deviant when it feels like I’m being “given” Sex. I’ve made mistakes as I can be passive aggressive and shady at times but I’m trying to stop it. 

He comes home from work and sits on the other side of the room messaging his ripped gym mate. I got a chocolate bar for valentines and a card for our 10 year anniversary. I know it’s not about that, but the niceties go a long way. 

So here I am, writing this, waiting for him to get home so we can sit on other ends of the sofa in silence. Dinner is cooking and we’ll be going to bed in a few hours only to wake up and I go to a gym that doesn’t seem to be changing my body, a job that isn’t getting my nowhere, and a house that I’m trying to keep afloat. 

Looking forward there’s nothing that’s keeping my going. And I’d be lying if I hadn’t thought of more drastic measures to end what I see as a simply beige existence. I don’t know what to do. I have no one to talk to, and nothing to aim for. 

It might sounds like I’m whining, I know there are people going through much worse, but I’m stuck and I don’t see a way thought it. 

And breathe...",2.3851415094339607,3.6637318600628968,3.9352654088050336,89.5043886792453,75.52515723270442,6.786113207547171,25.14138364779874,7.327094020958105,1.005573308176101,2357,79,521,27,50,785,277,636,0.091,0.759,0.151,0.9923,3,0,3,0,0,0,71.0,6,3,0,6,16,23,3,0,30,0,42,24,5,6,1,88,103,49,1,8,20,2,4,5,3,3,6,5,7,0,32,31,8,5,14,7,0,14,15,8,1,2,15,13,58,15,77,78,13,86,0,3,4,5,32,32,1,9,43,307,90,6,0.0,0.0,0.0631844189099968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421232391185187,0.0905461998687774,0.06634167404098304,0.10656368667999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166519811011413,0.09957397512226113,0.0,0.0,0.1430175036882752,0.0,0.0,0.13589744097939396,0.0,0.0,0.14384020512480353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369889706969396,0.05577441364350125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670276499484904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251876175658486,0.0,0.06342809998536011,0.0,0.0,0.05408839825512477,0.0,0.11469449480538592,0.06690168614558918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10910546594190956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061038372715353624,0.0,0.0982151534292978,0.13876731752934776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004783063662463,0.0,0.10148400856915464,0.0,0.22078567298007845,0.05430730198744591,0.05178465351938062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05800122483192587,0.0,0.0,0.06882378136732874,0.0,0.0,0.04339902101334689,0.06840950392757213,0.12989445217078646,0.06430907928082974,0.06376344578075775,0.14942031391264515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19275631576845886,0.1151014681743592,0.0,0.0,0.14233457877083233,0.21111208133058532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371996539674145,0.15816228764346255,0.0648942090086509,0.05717340866095755,0.1718990410324725,0.05437176404007624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05843733057066234,0.06126584284021839,0.04321959503997267,0.06564400906782086,0.0,0.07052923084423407,0.0,0.0,0.06525045657670836,0.13737416340827166,0.0,0.0,0.051680999419296415,0.06881656230358796,0.09519402447300106,0.0,0.0,0.06253373576858813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863815040647729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043874719757624366,0.0984870927192104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701154535641648,0.0,0.08977581059446246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299330747829824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295807398827268,0.0,0.0,0.06951480269621399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148997281965388,0.0,0.06552813292916494,0.15478661097130014,0.0589438777576185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711993928406564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969189129596864,0.0,0.07247975339682121,0.04582875798230659,0.0,0.0,0.05413197956114785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408350338020188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043015497350771134,0.08297542835497833,0.0,0.10280488880779833,0.03775490675494973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21979720354128948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15275949295248215,0.1027874269886022,0.1558101073266394,0.0,0.05821596157496204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482895181225405,0.0,0.04713709948526824,0.0,0.06598344169170513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20847699195193428
mentalhealth,MalviNolie,2020/02/24,Please share your experience (psychosis) It’s been a year since my psychosis appeared. For 3 weeks I had hallucinations and heard voices. After that I went to a psychiatrist and started taking meds. I gained a lot of weight(35kg). I’m not having periods. I don’t like going out much. I can’t even listen to music like I used to. I have no interest in anything at all. I don’t love myself anymore. I can’t even look at myself in the mirror. Please share your experience. How long will it last? Am I gonna be normal again?,0.8072664835164822,3.339937721153852,2.964835164835165,87.03730769230772,90.05769230769229,5.279120879120879,19.92857142857143,6.868970318607317,0.5578263736263733,409,13,81,6,14,138,73,104,0.022000000000000002,0.732,0.24600000000000002,0.9636,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,0,1,4,6,0,0,4,0,11,1,0,2,1,10,23,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,3,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,0,4,4,15,6,11,16,3,16,0,0,1,1,7,5,0,2,10,55,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958099350979814,0.0,0.0,0.16247837877083215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608178575185893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862733606465322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11221113970827083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16094201403023756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19292089363361908,0.0,0.0,0.17473042565359756,0.16580199779819876,0.0,0.0,0.16785857816151845,0.17819959174890845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21931414029363253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14514297737738127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19345175811325016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4334652135208977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16332650090430031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397508387713132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484522103280824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705269522220536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15837648779654068,0.24043180987928656,0.0,0.1830312031482277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714651573604244
mentalhealth,AnnuallyUnsteady,2020/02/24,"Can someone please tell me what's up with me? (17,m) 

Hi there, my goal with this post isn't at all to get any pity or shit like that. I just wanted to ask y'all if u could give me a idea what possibly could be wrong with me because I feel like something up there isn't quite the way it should be. 

So first of all I always had a hard time opening myself to people and created myself a kind of mask to go out. However the last Years it got even worse to the point that I know have only a handful of people I even know closer. I also have a totally defunct dating life, because first, as said it's very difficult for me to open myself up to a person and second, I always feel inferior compared to other guys around me. I feel like I'm so much worse than all the other guys and thus not worthy of a girlfriend (saying this sounds so stupid I know but that's how I feel). I also overthink everything twice before doing it and going on any public meetings (f.e clubs etc) is a real hustle for me, because I don't feel comfortable at all around these places where often there are people that I perceive as being better than me. 

The next thing I wanted to mention is that I have problems falling asleep on a regular basis even if there isn't any reason or worry on my conscious mind that would keep me awake.

The last thing I think is important to mention is that I often have mood instabilities, meaning that I'm either very happy or very sad and I often cry when I'm alone etc. I've thought about killing myself, however I don't feel a particular urge to do it (Ive just considered it a few times as option if u understand how I mean this).

I´m to scared to ask my parents to see a mental health expert as I feel like they would just laugh at me and discredit my feelings (something they've done in the past too) as nothing more than a ""phase that teenagers go through"" .

​

I would really appreciate it to maybe tell me if these are indicators for a mental health and if so, for what kind. Because I don't really know who else to ask. 

​

Much love to you all",6.374048801554742,5.418286190023757,6.86843122435759,79.90327736989853,65.95961995249407,9.554782984236668,30.537788814510908,8.575989854853784,2.1361201900237528,1630,48,333,20,22,535,200,421,0.125,0.7859999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.9108,3,1,2,0,0,1,44.0,0,2,1,5,27,22,3,1,21,0,31,7,3,4,6,75,66,30,1,14,14,1,10,4,1,4,3,3,0,3,29,15,0,1,21,1,0,4,7,10,0,4,5,14,46,11,51,52,13,36,0,3,1,1,23,19,1,12,15,235,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526172831184663,0.0,0.11622452254959288,0.12093054521025805,0.15747064963982738,0.17659819946087166,0.14824939955566924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12937915823714494,0.20380321717139466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17719000174492253,0.0,0.06183478368745425,0.0,0.0,0.06426859556626241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603834675988065,0.0,0.07982195711851295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436419444457879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06070446345443685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16208718740568945,0.14398881271522698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530896202204206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939434153154804,0.15574126480686434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362206348728295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0379658268571012,0.06970939283070865,0.12389603176511647,0.0,0.058118925841366915,0.0,0.0,0.14390471690489473,0.0,0.07735602184330283,0.06509590497604759,0.0,0.0,0.15448454217862925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08203288629255635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459031043390524,0.08039594360260333,0.151344266353862,0.15974487161815706,0.1184676015499163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051327281813385764,0.1420068941932554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558535494560531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300438119930959,0.15831266054722518,0.0,0.0,0.1464637180773167,0.0,0.0733735706554469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10683810883888653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772828273808838,0.0,0.0,0.06972653142556305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05526699175400873,0.0,0.0,0.08068878101194611,0.0,0.06936945603190106,0.15113571271657045,0.06345055392621843,0.07592218569184872,0.0797672138480497,0.06869437947491272,0.08192181150076851,0.06959548297198632,0.0,0.0,0.0695330885698133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772909478177156,0.0,0.08271164887670278,0.09310546315159966,0.07471440561149176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912353760148499,0.057788199949228014,0.07275295434154723,0.0,0.05790667667536356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459225716191689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06157102993837661,0.11188615243022897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702938777791026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655426195420393,0.04656247014778055,0.0,0.057689965102443584,0.08474613526254181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564954452602007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987516527103542,0.08572247798421025,0.05768016623245083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07379748508583572,0.14810900503575428,0.15486295512392487,0.07945062372527546,0.17659819946087166,0.046795558187334704
mentalhealth,tomjmsmith,2020/02/24,"How do y’all take care of your mental health? How’d you find a therapist? Do you use telemedicine solutions? [Austin, TX USA] Hey y’all, I’m a student at UT Austin. I was wondering if you could tell me about your personal experience with mental health/mental illness?

I’m looking to learn about what others have personally gone through with their mental health. Did you try any telemedicine solutions? How’d you go about finding a therapist? Do you favor some things over others? Why?

Would really appreciate any posts/pms. Would also really appreciate talking over the phone. Thank you!",3.4925714285714267,6.6855555428571485,3.7426190476190513,81.58821428571429,84.04761904761905,7.571428571428572,24.642857142857146,8.418075326091056,2.3224285714285715,472,18,80,12,14,146,68,105,0.025,0.7709999999999999,0.204,0.9557,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,11,1,0,5,3,0,0,4,0,9,3,0,2,0,13,19,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,14,3,11,13,1,5,0,0,1,0,18,3,0,3,0,46,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161972099806048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19761941492531745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14814412059061452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601107794189268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14213232363200082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656050839378763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257794426950363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4633447157064874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201630042745965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4392878980434157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537425726074129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861671670460355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924831868768056,0.11678749294045725,0.12699953608361125,0.1337736997545837,0.0,0.3374114733984316,0.09653157186365446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864988599833503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549346877369888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311116119256674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575728079433901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064354167836182,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coldpasta47,2020/02/24,"Frustrated with my mental health I didn’t really know where else to post this and I don’t want to speak to my few friends about it but I’m just so, so tired of feeling so miserable for no reason. 
I do have diagnosed depression so I know I won’t always have a reason to feel the way I do, but I’m just so sick of it all. 
I feel like my life is going nowhere. I physically can’t engage in any hobbies or stuff I used to enjoy, haven’t been able to for a couple of years now. I’m sick of talking about my feelings and getting nowhere. I have no decent/useful qualifications to get myself a better job. I just feel like this is all I will ever amount to and I’m tired of enduring it all. 
I don’t really mind if this gets lost among everything, I just needed to write it somewhere. Sorry.",1.1057559880239545,2.9826213532934176,3.3896070359281434,89.35111714071856,80.97604790419163,6.5702095808383225,20.61714071856287,7.645422480735847,0.6861380239520951,614,17,136,10,16,211,89,167,0.26,0.634,0.106,-0.9875,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,14,10,1,1,4,0,15,7,0,3,4,30,34,12,0,3,8,0,5,2,1,2,7,1,0,0,8,4,0,0,9,0,0,1,8,4,0,0,3,6,19,6,21,29,5,9,0,3,0,0,4,3,0,2,5,92,27,1,0.14511648709635072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074854230356685,0.0,0.0,0.09868418748189932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283437400704845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16056863281241446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498861769481533,0.14729017972474018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122620402808905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13126617065432672,0.0,0.0,0.13042134143709547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668762806924137,0.20734249475455624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211663795363007,0.0,0.2274521251371507,0.0,0.08247304382761357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542520398305543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440057216018346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950445236830607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250006644053372,0.14179317095676106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15841178805841272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146243287231094,0.0,0.14652628390699501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760203641761272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898148073622044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18593067510788786,0.2984078357036893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16244602644257694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612365890996908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663913541321365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.333580108839245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17455726625512485,0.12533405186831176,0.0,0.0,0.08559346392796191,0.11518671284060432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345025985912946
mentalhealth,Kali_Killjoy,2020/02/24,"My Schizophrenic Father Plans on Leaving the House Hi r/mentalhealth first time poster. My dad is schizophrenic and has not received any treatment or medication. He was previously homeless but now he's been staying at my grandparents' house. He's been relatively stable - we try to get him treatment but he refuses, other than that some arguments here and there but nothing big. Recently he's been saying that he was accepted for a job in Japan and plans on moving there. At first we went along with it thinking it wouldn't lead to anything, but now it seems that he is packing things. My brother and mother are very far away from were my dad lives, and I am as well, and will be for a while now. Father, grandparents in East Brunswick, NJ and I am in New Orleans, LA. Obviously, we don't want my dad to go homeless, or go to the airport and cause a scene. Should I be concerned? Thanks.",3.387995562130179,5.787237840236693,4.0299667159763315,84.98270155325447,75.92307692307692,7.301923076923077,27.722263313609467,8.278499904357787,2.0317008875739653,701,29,133,13,16,222,105,169,0.028999999999999998,0.9,0.071,0.7945,3,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,3,0,0,5,7,3,0,0,5,0,18,3,0,2,1,31,26,16,0,3,7,7,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,8,13,0,1,3,0,0,6,3,0,1,2,7,1,13,3,19,14,1,27,0,0,0,0,22,11,0,4,9,89,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273485258653554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410544336579052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17594426282613326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923756161598232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31857979047585616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783969644401028,0.0,0.2128572129552542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4321637968947555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18583439586543826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19828956114277152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536089853739694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886526071931909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19903603516553872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18086440843355356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17968850499287434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849043606039772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14892287114828653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048157207275794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19960255830671203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17241103025974386,0.0,0.0,0.12441240533930062,0.1199936448661868,0.0,0.0,0.10919736030112644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271425437973389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154515547487609,0.11045540053653216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16837624239514895,0.17359912699963018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thedeserthare,2020/02/24,"My mom told me her friend's son killed himself. And then the friend killed herself a few days later. 

It was at that moment that it dawned on me: if I finally killed myself, my mom would do the same.

 I'd be killing my mother if I didn't work my shit out and get better. 

Not to say I'm her favorite out of three kids, but she apparently worries about me the most.",2.175108225108225,3.3513317272727288,3.3604545454545445,93.8273484848485,75.88311688311687,6.172294372294372,21.924242424242426,6.42735559955562,0.14956450216450268,281,7,66,2,6,91,57,77,0.175,0.7290000000000001,0.096,-0.8243,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,1,8,5,0,4,0,5,1,1,0,0,11,8,6,4,3,4,4,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,3,1,15,3,7,3,3,9,0,0,0,0,14,4,1,3,5,46,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993425600856738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933191197014043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185710277348177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619547270249029,0.0,0.08857168813811374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7502330420607999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3970996574483019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134815934425214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17401865534840955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199182705908816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234188282728138,0.1721645062282416,0.0,0.1204282421049341,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nomadsocio,2020/02/24,"My friends say that I'm crazy and I got anger issues Hello, I'm usually calm and people can describe me as funny and a little bit weird. The thing is, I'm extremely irritated by jokes like ""haha let's take his phone when he's not paying attention and hide it because it's very funny hahaha"" (this is just an example).

I got 2 close (not really  close, but something like that) friends and 1 ""normal"" friend in my class. Let's call my 2 close friends Jake and Paul, and the ""normal"" friend Carl.

My first rage that was noticed by them was the following: I was on my phone in math class, just chilling, and Jake and Carl started throwing pieces of paper and pieces of chewing gum at my back. At first I giggled, but then I told them repeatedly to stop. I got angry and I violently threw a book to Carl, then I took Jake's notebook and tore it to pieces.

Jake stopped doing stupid things like that afterwards.

My second rage that was noticed by them:
It was the class break and I put some money on my table so I can count it, but Paul thought it would be funny to grab the money and put it in his pocket. I told him to give my money back but he said ""no"" (he thought again that he was funny). I got angry and I told him to f*ck off and give me my money. I knew he'll give me my money back in the end but I didn't have time for his b*llshit so I grabbed his jacket's pocket where he put my money and pulled it. Then I saw that I accidentally ripped his jacket in the pocket's area.

Jake, Paul and Carl said that I got anger issues but I knew it was justified because I warned him about 5 times to give me my money back.

The third and the biggest rage was today:
I was doing my homework during the break and Paul, Carl and another ""normal"" friend called Vic didn't stop teasing me. They put things in my hood, like pens and papers, in order to annoy me. I told them a lot of times to f*uck off but they didn't fking stop. I reached my limit when Vic touched me with a pen behind my back as I was trying to finish my homework. I got up and jumped on him, squeezing his neck.
They said I'm crazy and Paul said they can't joke with me. I tried to explain that he has to be retarded to think they were funny doing that.

After each outburst, I returned very quick to the ""normal"" me. (the funny guy)

Maybe you think I'm a mad guy who never smiles, but it's not true. I usually laugh a lot with my ""friends"" and I can make almost everyone laugh if I'm in my mood.

Now I ask for your opinion, do you think I got anger issues?",3.126707146917472,3.9390454875717036,4.249662549739032,89.77082062942482,73.09177820267686,6.954245258642964,23.121750813911422,7.001395882987947,0.5756412485142888,1942,47,433,17,37,635,206,523,0.18,0.706,0.114,-0.9912,0,0,1,0,0,0,70.0,0,3,9,3,16,32,11,0,19,1,31,2,1,1,2,73,73,43,0,6,14,0,4,4,7,2,0,5,2,2,25,32,1,5,9,3,8,10,9,12,0,4,36,10,83,19,46,31,8,69,0,0,1,0,60,23,0,6,37,272,108,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495483876000263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801860931037856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06064180296773949,0.0,0.0,0.2493932428326656,0.0,0.07908453057906759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081786359398927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247273206901344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745282732651435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06198311078926432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11035151830046888,0.0,0.0,0.35081208765931965,0.0,0.0,0.24890499710721464,0.0,0.0,0.3631599464826008,0.0,0.0,0.128456875359372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20311259826222733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266161741894789,0.0,0.1267627795662205,0.06501368336799496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029505172310557,0.0,0.0,0.04329916505873694,0.0,0.06516752819579616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050029358678376136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542231907444821,0.0,0.14770281030336008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04497054678111108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608366372209554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04155540253501877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24681313705487856,0.051584769129051085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04993771519896842,0.0,0.0,0.04591313163572057,0.0,0.0,0.21692655989085802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04877184233262743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12928407483819024,0.12469228708085135,0.0,0.10299415913585044,0.11347324780677708,0.0,0.06148624447743475,0.2479324431570573,0.07206952199871769,0.08808074565975027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428834705560148,0.10704398568921827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04607959060689969,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Timberland11,2020/02/24,"How can I help my friend? 32, 175 pounds, male, no known meds.

Not sure if this is the right place, but my friend claims he doesn't
Feel like ""himself"" his doctor did a whole blood panel, did an ultrasound, pretty much every test under the sun. Everything came back normal, his doctor said it was stress. 

Fast forward, he finds a new doctor, gets all tests re-done and the second doctor says the same. Stress.

Now he thinks the Lab (Quest) is against him and has either 1) messed up machines/equipment or 2) they're lying to him.  

He says he ""feels it in his gut"".

What should I recommend he do from here? If any doctors in here, have you guys seen stuff like this?",2.428128205128207,4.489940607692311,2.52269230769231,96.27147435897436,77.53846153846155,5.256410256410256,17.756410256410252,5.985473137389443,-0.48612820512820504,509,9,110,3,12,153,100,130,0.162,0.732,0.106,-0.8048,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,0,0,5,8,0,2,8,0,11,7,2,1,2,20,18,7,0,4,6,0,2,2,2,1,5,3,0,2,6,3,0,0,5,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,6,6,11,5,7,11,5,12,0,0,1,0,21,7,0,3,7,62,17,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043391234179644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022567498605966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15209865906561176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6805755419768457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204504315055147,0.0,0.11951775112081806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448175743254742,0.09500404002820714,0.0,0.0,0.1215452787746118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054867444820424,0.0,0.06947882962634798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167540569965108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913660081376923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12993886376498834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14771562406024327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775879226280842,0.0,0.0,0.1284371055486281,0.0,0.0,0.13029641926868332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13894033243101275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529288388130614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356790089430813,0.12649856172658971,0.21150897167591967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3046662274064127,0.0,0.15223525461481044,0.0,0.0,0.12533616791237942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521099626135123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14847226796677815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,studylover24,2020/02/24,Reaching an age I didn’t think I’d reach Today is my birthday and I’m turning 17. At 15 I was diagnosed with depression because of my past trauma with my father. Turning 16 was the most depressing thing for me and I hated it. At 16 I struggled so much with my depression and it was hard. I wrote in my journal that I didn’t think I would reach 17 and it was almost like a goodbye letter. Today I reached 17 years of age and I’ve never felt so excited about reaching an age. I cried when I realized that I was still here and I was doing a lot better and that I’ve been healing this entire time without noticing. :),2.124275568181816,3.7978530468750016,3.97474431818182,87.29127840909092,77.125,6.529545454545455,26.48011363636364,7.348242739294969,1.3737250000000003,482,19,99,6,11,163,73,128,0.196,0.687,0.11699999999999999,-0.9258,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,6,9,1,1,5,0,12,2,0,0,1,21,20,10,0,1,1,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,8,10,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,11,2,18,3,11,8,3,14,0,3,0,0,3,3,0,3,12,70,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591374120205458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070902176878216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15537079568607953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929714019958119,0.0,0.0,0.4539274211336301,0.17830704020321256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16867612953458555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573708350543644,0.1734432888006567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582622643810066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493531163734724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291417824960814,0.0,0.13549185592732074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000078396201102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677022422074654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14029476435120045,0.0,0.0,0.18365428465197714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671106529191,0.2251316672545335,0.0,0.0,0.10243785748737642,0.0,0.3330398629255031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.382169221448323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16934501333877394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247949087622129,0.0,0.0,0.11312932927940215
mentalhealth,ScarlettKnight20,2020/02/24,"Lost and confused on what I should do about my mental health. And it only keeps getting worse. I've had anxiety and depression for a long while now and I thought I was getting a grip on the whole maintaining and helping myself get to a better place.

But the fact is that its gotten worse and I'm  having  the rare thought of ending it. Plus I had a situation where I hurt myself again by scratching myself constantly. And I'm very very worried. 

However the cherry on to of the cake is that I have been to the doctors before and they are never helpful and on the flip side have no funds for therapy.

Help! Any suggestions on what I do?",3.02512987012987,4.995587039682538,4.142352092352096,85.76577922077924,75.42857142857143,7.121500721500722,25.740259740259727,8.00094639256281,1.5782952380952384,501,18,98,8,11,163,78,126,0.203,0.7390000000000001,0.057999999999999996,-0.9545,1,0,0,0,0,2,9.0,0,0,1,2,4,5,0,1,11,0,13,2,0,0,2,18,23,12,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,10,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,8,2,12,1,15,14,1,15,0,3,0,0,5,8,0,1,7,75,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143529577312988,0.0,0.12864013001266525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430897614397466,0.0,0.0,0.1487217624003732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18171866364197772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14483392406478773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17211646420977575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893775220692534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26356627049772696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874370191217695,0.0,0.0,0.3381375530888414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18001622549423169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14946623178988885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14881421479060228,0.0,0.0,0.1835639221056136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16946334433052795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296935342026699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127891458398973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756889373712635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890162265419116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19230290996626295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669967565731388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774953184673793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877419935002426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17077224025169438,0.3427339910294561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chickentender_pubsub,2020/02/24,"Any low cost alternatives to therapy through my insurance ? I'm not sure why I'm so anxious about it but I don't want to have records of my therapy sessions on my insurance plans. I'm terrified that their diagnosis would become a pre-existing condition or I won't get life/disability coverage because of it. Or it would mean a higher premium because of a depression diagnosis. My primary care doctor already added Generalized anxiety to my records because I showed up covered in hives after an anxiety attack. I didn't know at the time that it was an anxiety attack or I wouldn't have gone. I know I need the help right now but it's not worth it if the paper trail will be a hindrance in the future. The first and only time I've seen a therapist, she put down ""adjusting to change"" but I'm not sure if another therapist will do this and I don't want my mental issues to negatively affect me even further. 

Any suggestions ? I'm in the U.S. - Florida",3.989838709677418,5.806710564516128,6.057827956989247,73.71674193548388,72.38709677419354,10.551397849462367,32.83010752688172,10.650279960617883,4.109193978494625,759,38,139,26,15,265,107,186,0.214,0.745,0.040999999999999995,-0.9818,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,2,4,7,2,0,13,0,14,1,0,1,2,27,29,11,0,8,11,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,4,1,2,2,9,4,0,1,4,1,17,3,18,18,0,18,0,2,1,0,4,10,0,5,6,89,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029703167429234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18523757558909995,0.14281467244068574,0.3125715278349637,0.153864104548618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098880257118795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24907370448218466,0.15041914167401724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388621545426358,0.0,0.14407861177575598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11730647588433113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394036375696674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899569868723345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584929550308452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115743210417637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129013333289576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421545244921207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970087308968047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620013241051767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483587126459969,0.0,0.0,0.13725477538048858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098852137838467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358413180726972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369158355445705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631169149740515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256728557645152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3115068077607732,0.3162709662504137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883540186634293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16066531172683465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289681726801895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935012110787495,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BenJS916,2020/02/24,"Should I start offering online personal training for free to people who want to focus on their mental health also? Currently, I am a certified fitness trainer with a job outside of fitness and want to help people as a passionate hobby. I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder in 2016 and a way to really help get through tough times was physical fitness. I feel like the fitness industry is really struggling to understand how to deal with mental illness and getting started living a healthy lifestyle while depressed, manic, anxious, etc. is definitely a difficult task. It would be cool to see a community grow that encouraged not just a physically healthy life, but mentally too with people who understand what it can be like taking these first steps to that healthier life.",9.124179104477612,10.120746305970153,8.906679104477615,61.03972014925375,59.82089552238807,12.670149253731346,43.615671641791046,12.161744961471696,6.175077611940299,631,36,87,20,8,204,93,134,0.08800000000000001,0.696,0.21600000000000005,0.9022,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,1,4,10,0,1,9,1,10,7,0,1,0,18,21,8,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,2,6,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,3,0,1,2,1,4,0,1,2,3,5,7,18,15,1,15,0,1,1,1,9,6,0,0,8,62,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11934539912838242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16859621309231962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538575986616125,0.1285382816435556,0.15147320575235002,0.0,0.0,0.17103942578023335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16643957445619714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545910590214934,0.10661550019103913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269415798345708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15594116147274895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586327819725556,0.0,0.0,0.20006187691107455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14809546935494994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21082211567114573,0.14582008249803224,0.0,0.13177969432302813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4511897448571315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3103880585788619,0.1303086735419421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19121108724915106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892318915864912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126253828684174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15601573114939954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112208238046871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702174993388576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107235852566582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17604861908439626,0.11845800369480465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601423740891552,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,10ecorona10,2020/02/24,"Acknowledging I have anxiety/depression Hello all. Yesterday I had a conversation with my long time girlfriend where I broke down and sobbed in front of her. 

Essentially I believe my anxiety was triggered by my parents (specifically dad's) financial decisions. He lost a business and had attached our current house as collateral. Now they lost their home with a bunch of equity built into it. My mom had nothing to do with the business.

Long story short, myself and my siblings are now trying to purchase the house from them (basically bailing them out and charging them ""rent"" to live there to pay the mortgage almost as an investment between 4 of us) but I am taking the lead on everything (strategy, discussing with lenders, alternatives, risks, etc.). After 1 month and a half, I found a solution to keep the home within our family, which I'm extremely grateful for, but I still have severe anxiety and possibly depression.

From the inception of this nightmare, people warned me to take care of myself first, but I ignored them and told myself I was emotionally strong and capable. Turns out 2 months of constant thinking on this issue and seeing my parents distressed is finally taking a toll on me. I told my GF that I'm started to develop resentment towards my father, which I did not want to have bc I love him so much; I never want him to know that I'm starting to feel like this. He had already communicated to us that he failed us all, I see no reason to put more on his plate. My mother, on the other hand, is being dragged into this mess and all her life savings disappeared with the loss of the home. It saddens me deeply to see them go through this. I can't even imagine how they're feeling.

Now I'm here, waking up with no motivation to work, exercise, or do anything that would bring me joy. Every morning I wake up I immediately become anxious and I feel shortness of breath as if there is an elephant sitting on my chest. My head has constant pressure all the time. 

I found the solution to our problems, but I can't seem to feel happy, I actually feel worse than when this mess first started 2 months ago. I don't feel normal and it scares me. 

Thank you all for reading.",6.057081085940308,7.0497897548543715,6.629072276159652,74.71384214311401,66.5,9.598849334771666,34.43401654081266,9.725611199111238,3.425401546206402,1737,79,306,36,27,568,227,412,0.177,0.706,0.11699999999999999,-0.9483,5,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,6,1,7,10,12,24,1,4,19,0,23,9,6,5,6,63,60,24,0,6,7,6,7,1,2,1,2,0,4,0,16,22,0,2,16,2,4,6,7,16,0,3,13,10,60,8,58,45,9,51,0,7,3,1,36,19,1,4,26,222,76,6,0.0,0.0,0.08339150606221511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575047715808897,0.0,0.08557058519316334,0.0,0.09430143826518944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307452950876718,0.09653954036673072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032197555258664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437805420678416,0.0,0.09627823664129202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712680981186265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18469244627215925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720409672076473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09612508846398196,0.0,0.0,0.0953046318308291,0.05644205444088555,0.0,0.07199930996814176,0.0,0.0768012164365046,0.0,0.08055913018003279,0.0,0.2592509262217757,0.061048888320973126,0.0,0.09361149832737664,0.0,0.14537552826225833,0.0,0.18739343859514127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04856590201717023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096816719042866,0.0,0.0,0.08770122410203286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25715423634135304,0.0,0.0,0.19720660929419415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919255401238914,0.0,0.07595610552899537,0.0,0.0,0.04696369410842501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06035921499283457,0.041748872891024864,0.0,0.07545810719157225,0.15124952395587488,0.0,0.0,0.1865679019508603,0.0,0.07712624553032077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008356685971116,0.20462749127350374,0.0,0.06281907158341328,0.0,0.06590796899311922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372750828485638,0.08199613445967865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18977476727940285,0.0,0.0,0.0592435618035248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633738741426603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817686519492765,0.0,0.08590562347973221,0.0,0.0,0.08547787225346858,0.0,0.0,0.08786171236891377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555510943344183,0.0,0.20428910845171472,0.07779479219958782,0.0,0.09653954036673072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18145592924811954,0.0,0.0682442713288674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19275400427542175,0.0,0.0,0.07867524981673309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0547559513567379,0.0,0.0,0.09965870035201424,0.0,0.0,0.16331134565439145,0.0,0.05801816380611325,0.09295022577169394,0.0,0.0,0.3083746165735565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080684765617376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062212073566432075,0.0,0.08708568778131259,0.060704600441896926,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kirillmarasin,2020/02/24,"What is this? Disclaimer: not meaning to self-diagnose, just something I am going to show to my therapist for him to form a full opinion.

For the past 12 years or so I've been suffering from the following symptoms:

\- not having bonds with people;

\- feeling relaxed only when alone;

\- anxious around people;

\- avoiding people;

\- panic attacks;

\- hyperventilations;

\- occasional mild delusions (like closing the windows of my house for being afraid of someone watching from across the street or someone seeing me entering passwords (yeah I know));

\- hypochondria (afraid of having a brain tumor);

\- shaky, stiff muscles;

\- head pressure and tension;

\- pain in heart;

\- no motivation to start working after leaving school; afraid of and job procrastination, mostly because of the thought of having to interact with people at work;

\- brain fog, empty head with no thoughts;

\- difficult to learn and memorize (goes way back to high school);

\- washing hands after every little thing;

​

Would be glad to see any helpful input!",18.031768292682926,12.086903030487804,14.614195121951225,48.706414634146356,49.1829268292683,16.046829268292683,57.8,11.979248473330829,7.173916097560975,803,41,105,12,5,242,121,164,0.172,0.764,0.064,-0.9569,1,2,1,0,0,0,68.0,0,0,0,3,5,15,1,8,7,1,9,10,6,1,0,27,19,7,0,1,5,0,2,1,0,1,4,0,1,0,3,8,0,2,8,2,0,3,4,12,0,0,3,5,6,3,29,13,3,20,0,1,3,0,3,9,0,5,8,70,9,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304000103924816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641843477511612,0.15298882686810686,0.08561998099325029,0.0,0.0,0.1422372503537705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208248838499382,0.0,0.14323555459580445,0.0,0.09681347132705406,0.0,0.07675075562058538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28110410376777234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277913180451304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608071924036763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366154696368231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155493321836354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25843050260123,0.0,0.0,0.1491984904219086,0.08439172728293637,0.13302595460024666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14527791281707345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494166959351925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919430827060358,0.0,0.0,0.13331562608077827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06151101261545752,0.1261902748270679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714787743832674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09575672072294862,0.13397220931104767,0.147722844423424,0.0,0.0,0.12019093887931401,0.3491477709583545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548459478759851,0.20066058565580147,0.0,0.13134677812798448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133584525344023,0.09692811849352716,0.0,0.0,0.08911648131807129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308639059450637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14618585906752038,0.08364594492234598,0.0,0.0,0.19990962784511068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999378361999126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833212432808572,0.0,0.0,0.08943957489210598,0.0,0.15298882686810686,0.08107894159254793
mentalhealth,darkchoc_cupcake,2020/02/24,"Do you think I have an eating disorder (kinda long sorry)? I’ve been back and forth for a while. There isn’t a tldr because the details are important to my story, I think. 

I think I might have an eating disorder. I’ve always wanted to lose weight, from when I was about 13 and realized that my weight was three digits (didn’t realize this was the healthy weight for my height at the time). I watched so much anime that the skinny ideal was perfection to me and as a perfectionist with bits of OCD (runs in the family and was raised by parents with it), being very thin was something I thought I needed. I worked out in my room on and off but never committed. 

Right before I went to college at 18, I downloaded MyFitnessPal to learn about macronutrients and learn how to cook/meal prep. It worked - too well. I went to college and cooked all of my own food, biked a few miles for all groceries every week, and lived out of a mini fridge. Obviously this meant I wasn’t eating much. I didn’t have a scale but I dieted restrictively very strictly with my app and eventually was underweight. When I realized I was underweight I was happy I finally dropped weight, but my family wasn’t, so they socially pressured me into eating all my favorite sweets over that winter holiday and I gained the weight back to my normal healthy weight.

Well then I was upset and felt too big. I liked being super tiny and thin, everyone had suddenly noticed me and was concerned for me. I’m very quiet/shy/reserved and very lucky in life. I’m ahead financially and academically, as well as seeming like I have my adult life together (I cook all my own food, invest my savings, study hard, workout daily, great resume, have a good job and promising college major, a really kind family, etc). So no one really ever is concerned for me. If anything, people praise me, but it falls flat because I just feel like it’s not true. I’m a product of my parents good job raising me and pointing me in the right direction. My accomplishments are because of them being awesome in shaping me and enabling me, I really don’t do anything other than do as I’m told. And I fail a lot - I get C’s on exams sometimes and have to CRAM for finals to recover my GPA. Sometimes I feel like I kinda have imposter syndrome in this sense. 

So I decided I wanted to be thin again - for myself to feel attractive, fit my personal aesthetic, and see if anyone would be concerned. So last year I started trying to purge (never succeeded), chewing and spitting constantly, fasting for a day at a time, giving myself migraines from not eating, only eating if I was done exercising (my gym performance went way down). I eventually confessed this to my boyfriend and he convinced me to stop - I only chew and spit occasionally now (my boyfriend was constantly critiquing my image, which didn’t help, but we’ve broken up now after a short time dating). I never ended up losing weight down to where I was before though because I went home again and binged constantly.

Now I’m at my heaviest weight (not far over my old normal healthy weight though) and I’m struggling to get off binging. I’ve gotten it to a controllable place and I’m starting the decline in weight again. Every time I meet someone who seems to care about me, I think, “Will you notice when I’m skinny again? Will you want me to take care of myself? Will you care so much that you’ll want to take care of me? What will you say? Will I be special then?”

I really hate bratty attention-seeker people. So I’ve been trying to suppress those needy attention-seeking thoughts. I still feel like I don’t want anyone to see/touch me until I’m thin again. I don’t want to buy new clothes or go out in public. I don’t want to eat unless I’ve worked out that day to the point where I can just flop on the couch without moving. I feel guilty eating breakfast if I overslept my workout and will have to go to the gym later. I love the feeling of hunger, it makes me feel like I’m trying hard enough. I am constantly thinking about food and linger around the kitchen, opening and shutting cabinets. I live alone so it’s easy to hide.

I just want to be pretty enough for people to care about me.",5.084783629654479,6.071382655596558,5.7340726825450075,80.28016303253943,68.69249692496925,8.569553840992956,29.172962093257297,8.789673983102933,2.2505421402214028,3301,117,621,54,55,1072,344,813,0.066,0.728,0.20600000000000002,0.9991,4,1,1,0,0,0,102.0,0,6,2,17,43,40,1,3,29,0,60,38,4,3,12,120,121,63,0,17,18,2,24,6,0,9,4,1,4,2,21,40,31,4,25,9,2,9,18,7,3,2,33,28,105,33,98,72,16,112,2,3,2,1,24,50,0,12,57,415,126,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04414185685832709,0.0,0.0,0.03546356784654396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059602317034358025,0.0,0.07014587743113994,0.03794117150546456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554487810873626,0.0,0.10392394473513504,0.0,0.0725336032435382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04653041301828288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172715738574112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18422994514675212,0.04780237680254286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054973234438116456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09769328881844196,0.0,0.0,0.04361544307029557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3488902862420221,0.0,0.0,0.03774900355505359,0.08807648501121716,0.04753298645617582,0.0,0.038552570988827764,0.07181901151760453,0.04072559660536335,0.0,0.0,0.12053609473774167,0.0,0.15085100219660627,0.12179202315691527,0.040922245613014135,0.09337707930157814,0.0,0.0,0.15461018685380248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044534775701407785,0.040885349154673616,0.048444284783803485,0.07149590010463855,0.0,0.04698911601995879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04537018375645265,0.07635897245436113,0.04207879848686058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028567540252014707,0.0,0.04275171310616818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458829532663148,0.0,0.0,0.04438256396424752,0.0,0.03474129565758722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060208065308988076,0.12493297995498445,0.0,0.07526914732774671,0.037717692391168935,0.0,0.09536259981164864,0.0,0.036234320340218236,0.03846655418296825,0.0,0.028449432548270686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04521348467222023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0452987156785963,0.0939926430038845,0.031602469447033495,0.09861438643606177,0.04116302561591413,0.0,0.0,0.08351784044195923,0.0,0.09704716322393768,0.04472291606083755,0.0,0.028880670426559438,0.06482943439426149,0.0,0.0,0.0946497695812703,0.0,0.0,0.08864280885595846,0.03721446918395882,0.04452922259896328,0.0,0.08058006462963191,0.0,0.0,0.04336024563204265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092148192541373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279513803568327,0.0,0.033893434385264896,0.0,0.0,0.06792584465650597,0.07759998088126188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04344610696163463,0.03611210705789472,0.032811248397990385,0.08430528515269639,0.04771002258283682,0.0603338443029279,0.0,0.03403668806511586,0.03563254352117171,0.0,0.04455607183510589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409043854839874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654708298201096,0.08374860786132841,0.06767163706797599,0.09940913810948757,0.0,0.0,0.04072559660536335,0.0,0.0868093147656257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14066509811135386,0.20110882051718645,0.0338300713856525,0.034187495545545545,0.5190013709494006,0.11496251206387853,0.15803806560894207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041084522441377995,0.0,0.0930844260169712,0.0,0.0,0.030276292927232745,0.0,0.0,0.027446125373999687
mentalhealth,lll993,2020/02/24,"Boyfriend of 2 years reveals his recent depression right before I was about to break up with him. What do I do?  

I talked to my boyfriend of 2 years about moving into our own separate houses, due to his REALLY bad hygiene (showers once a week at most and is a cook so he gets gross and sweaty, rarely brushes his teeth, has dry skin on his nose and scalp all peeling off, in bad health, disgusting to live with, can barely face him to cuddle when we sleep, havent had sex in god knows how long). I have nagged him, talked deeply and expressed my concerns and willing to assist him to get better hygiene for the entire time we have lived together, but he never gets his act together.

Even the other day I made a compromise if he gets his act together with hygiene he can stay living with me but he said that he won't... so it said it all for me, and I was prepared to let him go and was thinking of even breaking the relationship off with him as its going no where.

About a couple months ago, he got diagnosed with tenosynivitus in his left hand and has been off work as a cook since, and went and got surgery for it. He is currently waiting to go back to work. He had bad hygiene long before all this happened though, and never cleaned the house.

2 days after the big talk of moving separate houses, he comes out with a big drunken speech on how hes been depressed and anxious all these weeks and feels so down about his future and his career, and that his hand might never get better etc. He looked so down and lost.

But at this point, I was so ready to break things off with him. He just has become like family to me now and I care about him but don't want to be with him, but now this mental health issue has come out of the closet, I am not sure what to do, as even moving out will cause him stress financially and I don't want him to get even more depressed if I leave him.

All he does is play video games and I can't imagine him ever going to get help or do anything positive like eating good, exercising lightly, getting hobbies or new interests. This is going to get him down if he can't work as a cook.

What do i do?",4.999064786721398,5.060642357308588,5.3306844547563825,86.3695158843477,68.58236658932715,8.301302873460648,27.017758343744426,7.882392219407189,1.3655710512225592,1660,45,355,18,26,528,204,431,0.10300000000000001,0.7859999999999999,0.11,0.8061,2,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,3,0,0,6,24,20,2,1,13,0,39,18,8,4,10,72,71,42,0,5,12,0,4,2,0,4,4,3,3,0,16,36,4,1,5,7,0,13,11,11,0,0,15,11,46,9,63,50,9,67,0,4,1,2,51,25,0,7,27,238,62,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865326849659563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749456417948592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06373337370201937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05955298249506135,0.19399835287982,0.0,0.08553559183689863,0.13180564306184625,0.0,0.0,0.13699350207335848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896373054894869,0.0795607654608778,0.0,0.13342975110938066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856951002052125,0.0,0.09989552693221644,0.0,0.20011839044020446,0.0786084211447523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777555245393703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924897302730176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637535661189454,0.20461555693927674,0.0700564453389762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301138951982701,0.0,0.039160200951055615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641719864107169,0.0,0.22007834379747546,0.06495998177518446,0.1238850035168692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848729936584531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16464789889044598,0.0,0.0,0.05191198072663542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680949111829813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083593118140221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04256357480744125,0.0,0.0,0.08200659513061091,0.08414783337624306,0.07919616115279059,0.0,0.0756746805445491,0.0,0.2051648737125366,0.1370786636294624,0.06503708841850521,0.0,0.08454399725263773,0.0,0.0,0.07328347917673962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804969709276449,0.0821604353816494,0.0,0.0,0.0618185153292441,0.2469459429657533,0.0,0.0,0.17919877185354746,0.07480007636543487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824799401053493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732137020741483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04961538114734874,0.0,0.07647087900414977,0.08315051845690077,0.0,0.0661404476788065,0.1473421880203319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406605602742291,0.0,0.07750425877657376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254961124406825,0.0,0.0,0.08871679635967955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299413118312123,0.0,0.0,0.18675009350229507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05145322676133933,0.04962576040854993,0.07609258758064093,0.0,0.04516074201757022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136205919853647,0.0,0.1242487518488493,0.0,0.0,0.07179537460691561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16914991233808244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974836607330302
mentalhealth,NorthGrapefruit,2020/02/24,"Why is therapy so expensive? I’m genuinely curious. I live in Canada, I’m from a pro elder family even by Canadian standards and I still feel awful asking my parent to pay 150-300$ per hour of therapy! 
Insurance only helps with the first 10 sessions even u see my moms health plan which is one of the better ones through her job (she works in government too which is real slap in the face)
I go to uni that offers counselling but the appointments are hard to make and only months apart due to high demand. I just feel hopeless, even if I were to get a part time job at school it wouldn’t cover the cost. 
Everyone says “go to therapy” like it’s so easy. But you either have to be rich or willing to sacrifice that money. And as much as it stresses me out it makes me furious there are people it’s not even an option to die to price/ lack of insurance. It should be free like a doctors appointment or atleast affordable for everyone.",3.432741935483872,5.111244317204303,4.789010752688173,82.81351612903225,73.56989247311827,8.830967741935485,26.378494623655914,9.3871,2.3346778494623663,737,26,145,18,15,245,128,186,0.136,0.7340000000000001,0.13,-0.3297,4,0,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,1,0,4,10,8,1,1,9,1,12,3,1,2,0,23,23,12,1,4,8,2,3,2,0,3,2,1,0,0,10,5,0,0,2,0,7,2,2,3,0,3,1,5,12,6,25,17,4,15,1,1,1,0,9,7,0,4,8,94,22,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215919053642886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11503068153360164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349854786975483,0.0,0.0,0.13312560220947578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3436231151240829,0.0,0.0,0.2485626802778876,0.0,0.0,0.12261238334769532,0.0,0.13152812465457075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063202867776097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795286095611576,0.0,0.14783627833240492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651143530468147,0.0,0.0,0.13825152095390345,0.0,0.0,0.08717888706205072,0.13741933061205702,0.0,0.0,0.12808644316419765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581361006232145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270850068963955,0.0,0.11484853852056295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17363692115076002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15232891218144234,0.1038155217889163,0.0,0.09561170868303244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762689180224936,0.19783845194566105,0.0,0.0,0.14442023184325012,0.14084620032546188,0.0,0.09016972122840894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14804084727890984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343179224923472,0.0,0.13163130334810666,0.10364384696169827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386895611657428,0.0,0.14898741026807158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4462171730071944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584112902030153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117362165677037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468784724879073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gordman12,2020/02/24,"A slow fall into depression. So when I was 16 my older brother got struck by an oncoming train late at night during a rain storm. Accident, i get it. At peace with that. 

So now I’m 16 going through 9th grade the beginning of high school dealing with all that drama, cool kids etc...  

At this point my family (mom & dad plus 2 sisters) were devastated. I can’t tell you how much it literally fucking sucked. From the love and support for 3 days then the rest of the world moves on. 

So dealing with that, I was slowly starting ti realize I was gay. And i was so scared. Literally terrified. 

Now heres where i go to the dr and get Xanax for anxiety about the PTSD of losing my brother. But not only was i using it for that I was using to to numb my mind sooo much to not feel. I started abusing them. In HS i forget about 3 years of my life. Skip to college. 

Out on my own still not out as gay hiding it at all cost. Popping 6-8 2mgs a day. My best friends sit me down at a party and scream to stop. I did. For 3 days cold turkey until I had a seizure and almost died in the hospital. Keep in mind this post is from 16  to 19 years old. Im 26 now. 

I think man it cant get much worse then this right? I have to come out or killmyself. Yes. I told myself that every day. 

I got to run quick. Will update soon....",-0.12054347826087053,1.987379463768118,2.0962137681159447,95.39584239130436,87.69565217391305,5.189130434782608,18.40760869565217,6.6274283507984215,-0.07148695652173842,996,27,232,12,32,335,168,276,0.147,0.7490000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.8927,0,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,1,2,17,12,2,1,13,2,14,8,0,3,2,33,36,18,1,0,5,5,1,0,1,1,4,1,0,2,13,14,0,2,3,1,1,6,5,7,0,0,12,4,28,5,44,23,9,54,0,2,0,4,15,20,2,2,26,148,41,3,0.0,0.1428081138965996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206931927215666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13059399715680414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220497360064342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264885979262537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103825757587225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109270212101365,0.2485218802421144,0.10381214745007283,0.0,0.12509091202406306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442259709748028,0.0,0.0,0.10155156207227876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136247765789182,0.0,0.060943492694943265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312103106274676,0.1114278657700982,0.188915550776187,0.0,0.13699973556622014,0.0,0.1927973969357228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12734636022971466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130192876202846,0.0,0.0,0.10713243180815732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596287390096273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513376823598827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484202538449985,0.0,0.0,0.10878285797238632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434014948049974,0.14116305499130788,0.0,0.12810411170590594,0.2658098327629248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310906036745907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647575872837472,0.0,0.0,0.0916683506481538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393962771289948,0.0,0.11543423903004302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14089289616123066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029317978983702,0.0,0.0,0.12067136490717965,0.12198260098498895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17062323764470394,0.0,0.0962552607656578,0.10076831687655444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13677579834700795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10534836519848352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723063450873177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517139721663736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20819811136463154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283017201476246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552344899026112
mentalhealth,BecomingStronger99,2020/02/24,"DEPRESSION IS OPPORTUNITY TO GROW When I was depressed

I felt lonely, suicidal, lack of purpose, tired and fatigue. I became depressed because for years events in my life are just not working out! 

You must look at depression as a state, in which you cannot go any lower. I view depression as a spiritual message from god that life is not working I need to evolve into a brand new person. Life is not working. Either I am too comfortable, or I am on the wrong path in life. Which was two reasons why I became depressed. I also became depressed due to my social anxiety. Realising anxiety was ruining my life. Not able to make strong friendships. Not being able to date. These two reasons are slightly less dramatic but are apart of the equation.

Bad grades at school, school bullies, doubt from family members and a verbally abusive father. My dad told me I will be worse than him. Surrounded by alcohol and him yelling at my mother.

Social anxiety and traumas from the past. One year later. Being apart of self imrpovement. I have bettered myself to an unbelievable level. My mentality is almost indestructable and can never be broken. I am confident and courageous. Currently learning how to Harness fear. I hit depression for the first time last february. I hit depression in August and September last year and evolved from it in many ways.

This month, guess what I hit depression. I hit it hard. Worse than last year. However, using similar tac tics I will evolve and once again become the strongest version of myself!

I hope this helps me out there struggling!

Thank you!",3.8789774734982334,6.928595452296822,4.662596068904595,77.3858022305654,78.57597173144876,7.777782685512367,29.33844964664311,8.660442795831766,2.9905654593639586,1255,58,201,30,32,403,165,283,0.251,0.631,0.11800000000000001,-0.992,3,2,1,0,1,0,39.0,0,3,0,7,7,26,0,3,10,0,23,8,0,5,2,36,37,16,1,4,9,3,2,0,0,3,8,1,0,2,9,12,1,0,4,0,0,2,7,19,0,4,5,5,33,7,34,21,4,41,0,13,2,0,15,16,0,5,21,140,42,7,0.154111504841289,0.09129846636858263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234916518695982,0.07716020536889945,0.0,0.0,0.06162145737131284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05240055400037948,0.0,0.17684231907277162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433833465030933,0.046972471469988585,0.08510202458559796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681495511467594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6636800664900102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264130559583762,0.08670914424759034,0.0,0.0,0.0739856062794468,0.0,0.0,0.06554358364505082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043792559851163634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488559863368256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902681887666054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05164884658200779,0.0,0.0,0.0765337487355824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884321681513008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27213378372015434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06470742504618672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05143531308850381,0.0781224385759558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765407473361971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615051664273987,0.0,0.0,0.05713586405001422,0.05943014660325637,0.07442092585264387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206186150028033,0.052214972058775684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355843472563141,0.0,0.06728211083478186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584522942117311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15596907051995493,0.0,0.0,0.08038595500989304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570972714662555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08055540302760253,0.0,0.08428648649348572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07094258406209432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04493182890242405,0.08856425204843213,0.0,0.07363007358965061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15054454695245706,0.0,0.0,0.06655142957139369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06116326962146178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695308313040407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16829251647543367,0.0,0.15705278954747165,0.0,0.08424836885730752,0.0,0.19848551274725704
mentalhealth,dhalimanhaha,2020/02/24,"Took the MMPI Test and the results make me feel bad about myself For the past few months, I’ve observed myself to have sudden outbursts of anger at work and complete lack of motivation. 

I saw a therapist last week and he suggested that I take the MMPI test. For the report from the test came out to be accurate, in the sense that I could say that the person in the report was me. 

All this while, I thought I was going through a crisis of sorts but the report just put in front of me things that I’ve largely denied. I’ve difficulty in admitting that most of it’s true and I’m not quite nice as I’ve portrayed myself to be. 

Anybody else has had similar experiences? I am seeing the therapist again tomorrow. 

Thanks!",3.326666666666668,5.2182664788732405,4.3151408450704265,85.20163145539908,74.35211267605635,7.550234741784037,25.21361502347418,8.344100000000001,1.5994488262910798,568,19,113,10,12,184,89,142,0.132,0.8029999999999999,0.066,-0.828,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,3,5,1,0,13,0,9,0,0,3,2,21,21,7,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,8,6,0,0,4,0,0,5,1,2,0,0,7,4,12,3,20,11,4,19,0,0,2,0,5,6,0,2,8,75,20,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17375997226746145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380180360589156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218195376080916,0.0,0.0,0.16615585534449798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17384601435890276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20356778183722135,0.0,0.0,0.10522474026558792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182715410123342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16963431672178167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13891249477318654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661083717944667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986609017381854,0.0,0.1817102941238744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20920419571289348,0.0,0.22134654454555944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16549439145754222,0.0,0.0,0.16583368622206007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15646995234017147,0.0,0.0,0.1915962156342867,0.0,0.4832546422303252,0.1382565025280439,0.0,0.0,0.16521306557781598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312136292783508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16693022921357384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150378155590047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mentalhealthreader,2020/02/24,Encouraging Someone to Seek Help How to encourage a loved one and friend to get help. More at [Psychology Today.](https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/two-takes-depression/202002/encouraging-someone-seek-help),12.800229885057465,17.836823275862066,9.338620689655171,45.32678160919542,57.620689655172406,12.142528735632188,37.25287356321839,11.20814326018867,5.954714942528735,181,8,21,6,3,52,22,29,0.0,0.40399999999999997,0.596,0.9595,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,0,9,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241854662304571,0.0,0.16355097667203256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6294742527494412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825316803215984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121246500432052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652385820286945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29672621874521243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057955226161582,0.0,0.3765497204830821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Franklin_Toreno,2020/02/24,"Depression causing temper and mental health issues I have been suffering from depression for 7 years now and my temper started rising through each year. I'd almost murder a dog and mutilate it's limbs without having any sympathy. Each year something happened that got me depressed and other reasons keep colliding on eachothers until I felt empty by 2016. Depression made me lose focus, unshave my beard for more than a month. Depression also made me realise that people never grow up, even facially. When you look at a kid all he wants is a toy, then when he grows up he wants to get a girlfriend (No offence, he wants to fulfill his needs just like the toy). Depression even made me take some early life decisions like to cut all my ties with everyone I know for no specific reason, live unmarried, not taking a driving test or buy a car, refusing to study although I was very passionate to learn etc. I'm not suffering from any mental diseases or physical one's. If we are talking about long-term depression then it'd be since 2005, but it started forming by 2013 and it got more worse each year. I know it's not a place of discussion for such a matter but I wish I could speak to someone who at least could figure out a way to reduce from it. My childhood was bright but people keep denying it for some reason, including my personal denial. There are many topics that caused my depression over the years, how to end it?",6.389831620380491,7.182121007434947,6.50459654493768,76.61129236824843,65.6914498141264,9.749486114148262,32.923901158976605,9.773937934552695,3.2361588016619285,1137,46,198,23,17,363,166,269,0.185,0.757,0.057999999999999996,-0.9816,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,1,1,0,1,11,19,4,0,12,0,12,4,1,9,3,54,35,19,1,8,11,0,1,2,1,0,2,1,0,2,13,11,0,3,9,2,1,5,7,15,0,1,9,4,20,4,32,22,12,32,0,11,2,1,15,8,0,6,20,131,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708802243441928,0.0,0.0,0.06954998157842575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828534153177404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17868456116962886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887714403983925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5992579645782586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770297211208426,0.0,0.09699468451982067,0.1148859013245424,0.0,0.0,0.08310368628448475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350496358431965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0454383033906529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13911591574489526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690739877871487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244518133503693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077422022158488,0.0,0.15460609524658858,0.0,0.0,0.0955930180186378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06142957486563839,0.08497842502158738,0.0,0.07679621819956292,0.07696582830262594,0.0730330052538608,0.09729732942667846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24687971970527994,0.0,0.08817406136760547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752908709921958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941872806135571,0.0,0.0,0.06448724943652312,0.06707672583193178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05893321092559053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058827523017765,0.07593896296414357,0.09086527525219583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26825933563400906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719425903007307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368950896144237,0.06695385508753478,0.0,0.0,0.12311581136240872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078142846063914,0.06990329616309304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175946553894519,0.1538917080631117,0.0690328411062428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000113574490969,0.08383610183052563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886299925856031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800295616179048
mentalhealth,yagurlkeyll,2020/02/24,"Should I feel guilty for taking a mental health day? I hardly ever miss work, but when I do, even for a legitimate reason such as the flu, I feel guilty. It took so much courage for me to call in today. Usually my work pries and asks why you're not coming in which they're not even supposed to do. I don't want them to think I'm lying about being sick so I feel like I need to explain myself. Some workplaces can treat you so awful if you struggle with your mental health. The last job I had denied me a position because of mine. Even though that's illegal they got away with it.

One of my bosses didn't even ask questions when I called.
""Hi. I need to take a mental health day.""
""Okay, I'll let the team know you won't be in today. Feel better.""
I was pretty surprised. Usually they ask so many questions like they're trying to make you feel guilty.

What is your opinion on mental health days?",1.8915332690453217,3.845493196721311,2.987470266795242,92.81702025072323,78.78142076502729,5.3987785278045655,18.96142719382836,6.2272716619740125,-0.14579691417550622,697,15,149,5,17,223,110,183,0.2,0.691,0.109,-0.9551,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,6,3,4,14,9,0,1,7,2,13,6,0,3,1,28,35,11,0,5,4,0,6,2,0,2,6,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,11,1,0,2,5,2,0,1,5,6,26,7,20,25,2,18,0,1,0,0,19,5,0,5,13,92,31,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764565701745748,0.0,0.09261231846876204,0.0,0.0,0.060089017277917225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08717956343762563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20130754340608747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491167300094175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907137556639448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26042541662976937,0.08916467172834718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24920665370059514,0.07042037330703976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883761170866313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830179852830143,0.0,0.0,0.4191127821086007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781821797365052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05417299089223114,0.08034992591347298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079728820333336,0.0,0.09631530712489997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579805831261999,0.09993726994720503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3973524826216929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246229363665342,0.14618085081103652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667954284715541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028389725193626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22084801931596573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134917693970603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304961295144666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482288409701607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631614209754398,0.09684720027913862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18687083199235605,0.0,0.1095179226805304,0.06692440871870657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21712785719541608,0.0,0.05814074620434044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894655088025039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435242332905214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,winslowly,2020/02/24,"insidethebox Hey guys, 

I’m finally on the other side of a really tough time in my life and figured it’s time I tried to help out other people that may be going through something similar. 

I’ve started a brand called insidethebox. “The Box” is a metaphor for public discourse and the brand is my attempt at bringing more conversation about mental health inside the box.

I’ll be donating 15% of profits to mental health research.

Show some love!!

instagram.com/in.sidethebox",5.49159638554217,8.479734469879524,5.942996987951808,70.93329066265062,71.77108433734941,8.005421686746987,30.856927710843372,8.841846274778883,3.0568084337349397,383,17,59,8,8,123,62,83,0.022000000000000002,0.8540000000000001,0.125,0.8622,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,7,0,5,4,0,0,0,6,10,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,11,7,2,11,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,2,4,34,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427343152216184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604059377438105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509931454068674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23537592370044766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5053613612508183,0.0,0.0,0.1593358276785214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16790563405705755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21454770675440585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4791230429761928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16480214014712058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522867690664305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18300516511184955,0.0,0.0,0.16825640104517026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772278810102767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16139336109404542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mozartisgansta,2020/02/24,"I had enough of life. I don't know how much longer is this gonna be. But I am not doing good. I have no emotional support. I wish I had a friend whom I can share everything, a truly loving friend. I wont survive this loneliness. I am already on meds. I think I need a soulmate or something but I won't.. I can't take this anymore. Will someone help??",-1.1905090909090887,0.8703958400000005,1.3864242424242406,97.26654545454548,97.26666666666668,4.327272727272727,20.151515151515152,6.1124844417494595,0.06513333333333328,268,10,62,3,11,91,52,75,0.08,0.603,0.317,0.9206,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,3,0,14,2,0,1,0,9,22,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,0,13,6,2,15,2,1,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,1,0,44,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26216118188107546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23560270863846874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672309909979699,0.0,0.2454703008416153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21350997441075856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3670874756651015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992599966426063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592362070097124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13056065505960468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16780065533503832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144135662641613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638834718475408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17463913969866562,0.17615298070792218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20128981719461408,0.18289074579254408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26958830875406936,0.0,0.0,0.17862087967682722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15222339326720608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273190419396708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dippolittle,2020/02/24,"Feeling Burnt Out      I’m not really sure if this is the right place to share this, and this is my first post ever so please bear with me. I (18F) have really been struggling with a lot of things recently. I’m a senior in HS and I go to the most rigorous and difficult program in my school county, so I’m taking all AP and college courses, which is a lot of work in and out of the classroom. On top of that, I have a job at my local library where I work 20-25 hours a week (which doesn’t seem like a lot but on top of school it is). This combination means I have almost 0 free time. Every day I go to school then straight to work and then home to do all of my homework and sleep. On weekends I work all day Saturday and do homework Saturday night and by Sunday I genuinely can’t bring myself to get out of bed because I’m physically and emotionally exhausted. 
     Lately I’ve been struggling to do my homework and I find it really hard to focus at school and my job, which has resulted in me falling behind. I know this is a bad thing and I want it to stop, but I cannot get motivated to do any of my work. I cant enjoy my hobbies because I don’t have anywhere to make time for them, and when I do have time I cant seem to enjoy them as much as I used to. 
     I do go to a therapist and I have told her about my feelings, but she couldn’t really give me any guidance given that her suggestion was a mental health day where I skip school, which I cant do due to my schoolwork. I also talked to my mom but she wasn’t very understanding and basically told me I was lazy and I have senioritis. I have been counting down the days until I get a break from school, but it’s over a month away and I’m scared that I won’t be able to make it until then. I really can’t risk having my grades fall right now either, which is why I’m so worried. 
Are there any suggestions for me to stop feeling this way and regain some of my motivation?",4.284060717196411,3.926635665036677,5.741335574572131,84.25311175631623,70.1002444987775,9.163854930725348,27.555114099429503,8.841846274778883,1.7550757131214336,1493,43,340,24,24,509,182,409,0.134,0.809,0.057999999999999996,-0.9862,2,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,2,10,11,13,0,4,15,0,41,3,1,6,5,62,71,37,0,3,8,1,4,1,0,1,2,0,5,0,21,24,0,2,11,1,1,6,12,7,0,1,9,4,53,7,54,59,10,64,0,0,0,0,14,24,0,9,32,234,74,24,0.08140028380078992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151062597985746,0.0,0.0,0.06509577754637919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16606495295762236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647824616432942,0.0,0.06796583688153376,0.09924171494968573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20998579589619196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915643630972193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363121695201108,0.06858324986761814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347528788364008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439838470344215,0.06923903981759766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275848658392892,0.07808656949594613,0.13878497146279573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291866564034122,0.0,0.0,0.08652469523136372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816511216256532,0.0,0.08016288270526024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155444280488873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04473546717558393,0.0,0.09182306567408907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039768066977913095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20761083115720894,0.0,0.0,0.10867064304117986,0.0,0.0,0.08866877236996412,0.0,0.0,0.08203234052012033,0.0,0.0,0.09533502858040226,0.06497292992578367,0.0,0.05983857463027596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638865214059114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504597140457412,0.0893530675668117,0.0,0.0,0.07795897076443807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607355308808867,0.0,0.08037296004987153,0.0,0.0,0.13903079520456038,0.0,0.0,0.08149588447891334,0.4942885977608714,0.0,0.14820752238277224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145907011225055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610856424178244,0.0,0.17019450105004924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767188041494556,0.0,0.06120288302788196,0.06542646473112645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09451200341904294,0.10815746314885934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239548026394816,0.0,0.0,0.1555629190083633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474056617181536,0.0,0.07030370977220314,0.0,0.06716375906301097,0.04801199639433653,0.06461175640973099,0.06529439767556516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345109512599347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963018803983805,0.08266593946350655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sometimesITryToFly,2020/02/24,"How can I handle my worsening anxiety? I've been having anxiety attacks for about a year now. They started after a really traumatic expirience last year and have been getting worse ever since then. When I kissed the guy I've been with for the past six months for the first few times I always had a panic attack but it soon started to get better. he was the first guy I had ever kissed sober. I've done a lot more stuff when I wasn't sober because I don't seem to get any anxiety attacks when I'm drunk I just feel really really bad about what I did the next day.

After the first two months he started treating me worse and worse and my anxiety attacks have been getting out of hand lately. I'm not saying it's because of him, I just need to learn how to handle it better without relying on others and I wanted to ask if any of you've got any advice for me.

After an event that took place this weekend that I'm not going to talk about here since I already posted the whole story on r/relationships I can't even be in the same room as him anymore without sarting to sob uncontrollably and feeling like I can't get any air.

I just really want to focus on myself and getting healthy again since I'm currently batteling an eating disorder aswell but I just can't seem to be able to get my mind off of how others think about me and how it's never going to get better.

I've been in therapy for several years but it doesn't really help me anymore to be honest...

Does anyone have any ideas on how to get it all out of my head for a while?

I'm just so tired of this constant fight about something I feel so helpless against...",5.508383119962069,5.200547996996999,6.411629524261105,80.31065433854909,67.52852852852854,9.412928718191877,29.538327801485696,8.99025400887824,2.2223669669669666,1285,40,260,20,19,428,158,333,0.18899999999999997,0.718,0.09300000000000001,-0.987,1,0,1,0,1,0,19.0,0,0,1,6,27,18,5,2,15,0,24,7,2,5,4,46,55,24,0,4,13,0,4,1,0,0,1,1,1,2,14,10,2,0,8,2,0,3,11,10,0,5,13,5,28,8,47,39,6,51,0,2,0,2,12,12,1,4,36,177,42,1,0.07507108560783714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335859601588418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284280972904817,0.0,0.0624651570450024,0.0,0.0,0.2552545625527278,0.0,0.2297167000455928,0.0,0.14890068944104026,0.052491448546681134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018133119168314,0.3416167899708522,0.0,0.0,0.06268122076120332,0.09152527400382517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19918282389920733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811251740503144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04841463974109594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603796796042695,0.0,0.06569521291053683,0.07682378470103313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681646209388518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04958374403170581,0.13581218966610073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387458955118687,0.05363079855815102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19156628120383326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3529938940677041,0.0,0.08532925592956114,0.0,0.06004120503477031,0.0,0.0,0.14866435482204965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704459184236312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05031856625236394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847461179673023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061192954374711374,0.08468345443196967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036675940440985835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638227524163571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580039610300687,0.0,0.11984204862448347,0.0,0.0,0.05566425875593945,0.057899449206391326,0.0,0.07983895120683243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807974399181034,0.0,0.0,0.07166384568307599,0.0,0.0,0.07843330639410495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189734844756414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404622987269482,0.0,0.0,0.0805982513733136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05969954040809744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13668379372916342,0.0,0.08480895860188686,0.0,0.18629873333398886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057793389342318785,0.0,0.0,0.15940710234595273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593843242110179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033929496939749,0.0,0.0,0.0858503289025466,0.0,0.0,0.04810252041992165,0.0,0.0,0.04377455372360835,0.08628316950339247,0.0,0.0,0.08340673833377026,0.0,0.0,0.07333354238348268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855774263252457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381418613812569,0.0,0.1447316952160357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22951154920996736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502995348767134
mentalhealth,The_Knack_Blight,2020/02/24,"Why do I have this persistent feeling of impending doom? It used to be that I'd sometimes wake up in the morning with a feeling that something horrible is going to happen, but those were occasional and easily ignored. However, for the past week it's stayed with me, day and night. It feels like I've done something horrible or I'm going to do something horrible, and I feel like karma is coming back around to take a piece of me. I've been diagnosed with GAD and I have obsessive compulsive tendencies, and in the past I've gone through periods of depression, but this is like nothing I've gone through before. I think I'll survive this bout, but I really need to know why this is happening.",9.174203980099506,7.139747664179107,9.234925373134331,68.63084577114431,61.164179104477604,13.70945273631841,41.73631840796021,12.45797560212912,5.1970437810945285,553,26,102,16,6,183,78,134,0.165,0.73,0.106,-0.8909999999999999,1,0,3,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,2,7,0,1,5,0,12,2,1,1,0,23,29,9,0,1,4,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,10,10,0,1,6,0,0,5,0,4,0,0,5,4,7,3,18,23,1,17,2,2,0,0,0,4,0,1,10,63,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14335112250369872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382237393358007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702493928925685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13871335946189067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385123273312713,0.0,0.13869517603717038,0.16344238205233547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16478992278144425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32568706669748143,0.23008018122247095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830344801463729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847971549529697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884980508943269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23601383673273885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194019396177215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15111604397364442,0.0,0.1545129321342918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074433169959828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316014446117096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719070156746879,0.15926310100747454,0.0,0.0,0.1716368921133772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107475788332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318172498842187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907849136928588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12916880706591527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906096287847415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cookiesad,2020/02/24,"Am I depressed? This might be the wrong place to ask this, but I am seriously questioning if I’m depressed. I read somewhere that burning out can get confused with depression and I have so many questions.

For starters I want to say that I don’t want to hurt myself at all, and please don’t judge me because I haven’t done any research on the topic. I just feel inadequate all the time, I feel unloved by my family I don’t really have any friends, more like co workers. My only friend is a reddit friend who I sometimes talk to. I feel trapped and while I do have drive to better myself sometimes I feel helpless. Like I just want to curl up and not do anything for a while. I’d like to just disappear and start over somewhere new. Honestly it all comes back to how alone I feel, I am lonely and nobody knows this because nobody really cares to ask me. I’ve never had a relationship and honestly this just makes me think im unlovable. I crave physical and emotional love and I don’t even how to go about getting it. I don’t always feel like this, it comes and goes and I honestly don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’d like to go and talk to a professional but I have no insurance and I can’t really spare money to pay out of pocket. 

I don’t know if I need help or if I’m going through a mid life crisis at 26 or what is happening. Yes my job is very stressful and I want to cry everyday but I can’t really leave it. Is my job doing this to me ? Or am I depressed? 

I know no one here can give the answers I want but honestly a little feedback would be great!",2.0322567922874697,3.6803439478527618,3.7912050832602975,88.61872699386505,77.3128834355828,7.2338299737072775,24.52629272567923,8.07648339933343,1.3109495179666966,1221,42,267,21,28,410,152,326,0.22,0.563,0.217,-0.2542,2,4,0,0,0,2,25.0,0,0,0,2,11,30,0,2,10,1,33,2,0,3,4,65,67,29,0,10,15,0,6,5,3,2,1,1,0,0,15,20,0,0,14,1,2,7,14,14,0,1,2,7,41,16,30,61,4,26,0,7,0,1,15,10,0,10,14,174,56,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438145711572736,0.0,0.0,0.07582606274633566,0.0,0.0,0.12394076564935246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499084308868728,0.0,0.1703853563908614,0.0,0.0,0.07007205340534148,0.0,0.11110195663943913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059559396765056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291139607608707,0.0,0.0,0.15699795801785915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010018095064804,0.0,0.0,0.3139547554645674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093255910890527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250709496205992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06018939620111264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590767030107642,0.0,0.276463301494648,0.06510209033296269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112165429626646,0.0,0.09522157249776043,0.08741858867170481,0.15537097368261624,0.0,0.0,0.1004692949999239,0.0,0.0,0.08058447281207286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061081392290562676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755475179526056,0.0,0.09843422377701842,0.0,0.1808615934188301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20032696681658926,0.0,0.0,0.09649173345867143,0.0,0.0,0.06436662771368211,0.2226034714965595,0.09133451735291773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224686708721328,0.0,0.06082886151887969,0.0923898137739951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667274710123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757049492591997,0.07028377860859558,0.08801229974060551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06175090835182141,0.0693071940964871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520969918889834,0.10003153052566452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20416914918465204,0.0,0.09115298106096706,0.0,0.2335165421998273,0.0,0.0,0.09783771233417182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246889803943858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18025647812700407,0.0,0.06450109424462905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438718317729598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649098418572667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05839134813973365,0.0,0.0,0.05313765648500405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519040809546199,0.2687492222540123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473494424364623,0.1992690256825937,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alij18,2020/02/24,"Questions about Mental Hospitals?? TW I think for my safety and so that I can finally hopefully begin to heal, that I need to admit myself to a psychiatry ward. I live in the US. I’m a self-harmer. I have 3 piercings (not visible) that mean A LOT to me and add to my confidence and sense of self worth... do they have to make me take them out? I’m not sure that they’ll stay open. Could I use plastic retainers for them instead? So they’re not a “danger” but they keep the holes open?",0.6366545454545474,2.8176409200000023,2.705454545454547,91.85772727272727,84.8,6.436363636363637,20.090909090909093,7.686295010490155,0.7121000000000004,372,11,83,7,11,125,65,100,0.016,0.8690000000000001,0.115,0.7782,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,5,0,4,3,1,0,6,0,6,1,0,2,1,24,18,6,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,7,0,2,4,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,17,2,12,16,1,7,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,3,2,55,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18261663895752767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505547771758965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22717346614571976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20329943902201875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019665273103543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19445204598105265,0.0,0.0,0.15267432406813752,0.0,0.0,0.249146310515636,0.0,0.0,0.2304989055027621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16959514582666396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25622201426257746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4772157729297546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437881984195448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21556864373012707,0.0,0.17197116968862122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14655641065868372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751255088774137,0.197543164714434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chiannehubert,2020/02/24,"Hate myself  am 23f. I have been trying so fucking hard to come back from a mental health breakdown back in September. I ruined my relationship and family. Since then me and my boyfriend (37m) have come a long way he is finally coming back around to me. Well today we went to my inlaws and noticed they had a thank you note from my boyfriend's best friend's wedding. My heart dropped. I got kicked out of the wedding and everything surrounding our friends. I dont fucking know why i put myself in the position to feel like shit. I looked at the photos from their wedding and i just keep digging a hole. I know me and my boyfriend have come a long way, but i feel like i will never get to marry him because i will never be that good enough. He has been giving my kisses,hugs, we cuddle, but he still hasnt said i love you in 6 months. He says he loves me but not i love you.  When i say ""you know you love me."" He usually responds with a smirk or a mmm hmmm. Just when i feel back on my feet i get discouraged. I just needed to get this out. Being bipolar is so fucking hard even with meditation. I just wish i wasnt such a fuck up.",1.7938644688644698,3.5808047478632514,3.1779365079365083,92.125,78.44444444444444,6.166544566544566,22.253968253968253,7.07126945348624,0.5450942612942611,877,26,194,10,21,286,129,234,0.13,0.7509999999999999,0.11900000000000001,-0.5473,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,3,5,2,1,17,20,6,0,11,0,17,14,3,0,2,38,48,15,0,2,9,0,5,2,2,2,2,3,0,0,2,17,0,2,6,0,0,6,6,8,1,0,7,9,45,12,21,37,2,35,0,2,1,9,32,10,5,1,18,128,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864056114834313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985382394835456,0.0,0.059167993740759664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186040762782908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33444070575495977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375574777989605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029082185310753,0.0,0.06410842662735511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723291874444436,0.0,0.0915012597870481,0.0,0.14723214052360242,0.13868198868295115,0.0,0.10632649593368068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997946594846967,0.3589284098178916,0.15213240817577448,0.09311055653393192,0.0,0.08141086215814218,0.07762921624329658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17389667860454158,0.09582846732135332,0.0,0.10317219182409296,0.0,0.11501874184866752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862730186992967,0.0,0.0,0.16002793844363875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483901962896196,0.0,0.0,0.17179333929283286,0.08150749577994007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35040838265747354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781550052606612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747383069945142,0.0,0.0,0.07197012081095333,0.1497201416996148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050554250662732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757395286692898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10420808644775184,0.0,0.0,0.09232803205299424,0.1543749339901418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09963257884536714,0.08029055294865851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751370683726952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936149702962039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200327046884194,0.0,0.0,0.06589861468125051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689989849612858,0.0,0.0,0.15408633358537333,0.0,0.0,0.0872702463524801,0.08997729349654195,0.08758320911463625,0.0,0.11161632014037126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whyinstawhyyyyy,2020/02/24,How to get health insurance that includes therapy sessions for a medium low cost I’m in the USA. Is there any health insurance that’s a low cost or medium cost that would include free or $20 therapy or psychiatric sessions from reputable people?,10.650652173913043,8.605184934782612,9.79739130434783,65.78565217391306,58.34782608695652,13.547826086956524,44.73913043478261,12.161744961471696,5.54755652173913,201,10,33,5,2,64,33,46,0.092,0.835,0.073,0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,5,4,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,3,0,17,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20078177569096134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425720754602942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6276790487191739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20469085784159985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6752937658908915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20973885365960826,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigweinerkayne,2020/02/24,"My mental health is in a decline but I have it under control kinda... So I've dealt with my depression for 7 years now. I'm medicated and have been figuring it all out on how to handle my depression but around feburary/march it always starts declining again. It's mostly never suicidal thoughts but more so I dont find enjoyment in anything for long periods of time. It's been a week so far and it's been taking a toll on me. I've pushed away people I love and shut myself off from them. I want to try and bring them back to me but my depression tells me ""no dont do that you dont need them and they dont care"" so I dont do it. This is the only part I dont know how to approach. It's all when this time of the year hits that I lose all control of my depression and it takes over and I go on basically auto pilot. Could I get any advice?

TLDR; I've had depression for a while. Round February/March  it becomes the worst and I dont know how to take back control and not let it overwhelm me.",0.5040076824583863,2.481847000000002,2.8666602646180124,91.754433418694,83.69483568075117,6.314041826717883,20.479940247545887,7.520522993642371,0.6233305164319254,773,23,176,13,22,265,112,213,0.19899999999999998,0.7390000000000001,0.062,-0.9883,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,4,4,14,11,0,1,7,0,19,3,0,6,4,37,35,22,1,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,15,12,0,3,5,0,0,4,10,8,0,0,5,1,25,3,24,27,7,32,0,7,1,1,7,13,0,2,15,126,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485497539764385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225437306782613,0.0,0.0,0.05905134722277986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145849536362309,0.07730230563514409,0.0,0.0,0.08158512778535837,0.13354279795103435,0.0,0.0,0.0959033601654154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853492362899422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921813266475661,0.06933135034150976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3739578979532868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7123966837530533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936638230448365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04536814107291046,0.0,0.04935080757975775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230243462790699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954454106652884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879552714426796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684698361658536,0.0,0.09714709040732,0.0,0.0,0.07837273363460508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747797068044785,0.0875101001856863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438767320793022,0.06697315113394008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604256738589287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403474991399707,0.0,0.06020103606583015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146285271893087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498431219026664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958692288235689,0.0,0.07589834941308203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893795531202558,0.10126935031459257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058955833603462675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05121802679216103,0.0,0.06965447097966539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183886464105793
mentalhealth,matryoshka_03,2020/02/24,"I am terrified I’ll screw up my therapy sessions again I have been struggling with poor mental health for about 7 years now. I have seen countless therapists over the years but every time I go to a therapist I can’t bring myself to speak, my mind goes blank and I forget how to express myself, I start feeling uncomfortable and my thoughts get all hazy and mixed up and I don’t know where to start. My mental health has been getting worse lately and I am supposed to start therapy again in a month or so, but I only have 1 year to do it since my mother does not want to pay and I can only go to this place until a certain age, which I will reach in 1 year. I have been thinking about it nonstop, but the more I uncontrollably think about it, the harder it is for me to speak. I have tried expressing my words through writing but it feels so cringy and uncomfortable to me that I haven’t been able to do that either. Does anyone have any tips that might help me :(",5.766405594405594,5.416359225641023,5.9072261072261085,84.2848951048951,67.0,8.937062937062937,29.00932400932401,8.296473431620573,1.7455128205128203,759,22,161,9,11,241,108,195,0.153,0.792,0.054000000000000006,-0.96,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,10,4,1,2,6,0,22,3,0,1,2,30,38,16,0,1,7,1,2,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,10,8,0,0,6,0,2,3,4,3,0,0,6,5,27,1,24,30,3,25,0,0,1,1,7,7,1,2,15,112,37,2,0.13617285802191695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260221302117533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521522850557727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383315714153524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473150597067315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770617710492614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422893959780048,0.0,0.15478034663719994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894907606947628,0.0,0.0,0.0912737963314367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074837041540951,0.0,0.15360891512092673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744604253761456,0.1444578831429396,0.13749576808387393,0.0,0.10869187610824817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071311894193184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227165371748615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264359532721704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28915154935729986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235743750179927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31145106146063,0.3162143673711213,0.0,0.17450813800285656,0.0,0.10810603861355793,0.07940348858569589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245243197572238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031827977842175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13877177589705886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3507634238543661
mentalhealth,Throwakay1924,2020/02/24,"In need of therapy/ self therapy. Asking mys So idk where to start. This is a throwaway account for obvious reasons. Guess I’ll start with everything leading up to why I’m making this post. I’m 18, almost 19 years old. Diagnosed with Extreme Generalized Anxiety Disorder when I was 16. Never had an “abusive” childhood but my parents often resorted to spankings and sometimes straight up just slapping me everywhere except the face as forms of discipline, albeit not hard
Enough to actually leave a mark (as far as I can remember, idk how true that is tho). My mother often resorted to screaming and slamming doors when me or one of my younger siblings would upset her. I wasn’t hit as hard as my siblings were, god bless them. Anyway, for three years of my childhood, my dad was absent almost completely from my life for busisness, trying to provide for me and my mother and siblings, he rarely ever used hitting as a form as discipline, instead used words. Again, never full blown abuse, but definitely much harsher than it should have been. He’s also manipulative now that I’m an adult and moved out, tries to call my gf of two years manipulative. He was also an alcoholic but quit when I was around 15, cold turkey. Now has a beer every once in a while. Now that you know my past. When I turned about 17, I got heavily into bodybuilding and powerlifting, and the gym was my therapy, it became my addiction, and solved a lot of my anxiety and depression problems (I also have a past with self harm). It made me more confident, level headed, happier with the world. Fast forward a year later, now me and my girl live on our own, we have two dogs and two cats. Just now, one of the cats went off and scratched and hissed  atour new puppy, and I went into a fit of rage and grabbed the cat and literally choked it out until it was almost unconscious and threw it outside on the porch. I also did this to our new puppy (after shitting everywhere in our house) , not nearly to the same extent  I also have a history with loving flicking lighters, and fire. Am I turning into a serial killer? I also have anger issues, not nearly as bad as before working out but still there. I literally love these animals, and this is something I wish to discontinue and I want to get help for. I know I’m violent and it scares
of what I could become If I don’t control it. So I’m reaching out asking for help.",5.58320933625091,6.471102306345736,6.41139387308534,76.22830889861416,67.51203501094092,9.50690007293946,31.425893508388036,9.642632912329526,2.9763678191101395,1882,74,342,39,30,622,249,457,0.126,0.737,0.13699999999999998,0.6726,2,0,3,0,1,0,59.0,4,1,1,4,32,15,4,2,21,0,26,10,3,10,5,84,56,52,0,8,12,4,5,0,1,2,4,1,2,4,17,35,2,3,4,2,1,6,7,11,0,6,16,7,44,4,64,35,10,64,1,1,0,2,26,26,1,9,33,250,61,3,0.0,0.1891230630577283,0.07788282666778118,0.08700443396040036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529237664042523,0.23975388031081865,0.0,0.0,0.3829430843151908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210851723128792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104761946185477,0.14922273021392865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663782758396282,0.0,0.08814362498196833,0.06791223935589122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149470246107578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367902953228544,0.0,0.08951344783726849,0.06372161031120245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687400413486793,0.08100524056722191,0.0,0.0,0.09146891533054087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824648309780504,0.0,0.0,0.07219250972511161,0.06724317671232717,0.0,0.07172787865393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0416973128570498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383116698194273,0.0,0.08791946382910633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298776242727074,0.0,0.08190785318345194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698961830917816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208976366215174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330066876380735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772272910376079,0.0,0.0,0.08450702698151538,0.0,0.0,0.056372003589707134,0.0,0.0,0.07047349257243966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785141577982093,0.14406287392611095,0.07551793782225183,0.05327364383843879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482515921207474,0.05866936687666719,0.059177936111022476,0.12310843555906036,0.1541615539961298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374693230168763,0.08499480453755305,0.1081623366307447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886193091111301,0.0,0.15237491978102494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764357019759629,0.0,0.0,0.07636717511580181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848875185651434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205773991007337,0.0,0.0,0.09040891588914426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990350664223038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665180001700803,0.0,0.08192358605281387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061441463132287925,0.07893390715794386,0.0,0.11297953754769625,0.0,0.06373618856349535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27380829597572315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837119530910716,0.17362023218784572,0.2338876569789035,0.0,0.0,0.13786003984557466,0.0,0.0,0.04707387247013977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796892004579493,0.07201590736520554,0.0,0.09177730129930607,0.0,0.0,0.05810246595861729,0.0,0.0,0.056694573553161536,0.0,0.0,0.2055795110062362
mentalhealth,Flyer-Awayer,2020/02/24,"yeah i don’t know how to label what i’m feeling whenever I start a strong emotion, i talk to myself
but I don’t acknowledge that i’m talking to myself when it starts, i see myself in two scenarios, i’m either on Jimmy fallon addressing Jimmy and the audience, or i’m in a therapist’s office(haven’t been to one yet) 

when i realize that i’m just talking to myself, i acknowledge myself, belittle myself, and then keep going

i have this fear of abandonment, or that people don’t really like me. I was even scared to post on this subreddit due to what some of you might think of me. even though i have this fear of abandonment, i distance myself from the people i love most, because i don’t want them to think i’m annoying 

the worst part are the mood swings, i could be on the verge of crying due to me telling a joke my friends didn’t think was funny, and then perfectly fine 15 minutes later

I don’t want to tell my mom about any specific conditions i’ve seen symptoms for, because then i feel like i’m faking it for sympathy

i wonder why i think about that, because the only person i’ve told about this is my mom, and i only told her about the mood swings(she says it’s probably hormone)

i’m a 17 year old boy if that changes anything",4.79904761904762,5.233391246031751,5.8175793650793635,81.40589285714286,69.07936507936508,9.315873015873017,29.63888888888889,9.354420925462401,2.4624079365079363,982,35,197,19,16,326,129,252,0.161,0.68,0.16,-0.7415,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,1,2,12,18,1,3,11,1,16,2,0,1,1,32,43,15,0,4,6,2,2,2,1,1,1,1,1,2,14,4,0,3,11,1,0,1,6,8,0,2,7,5,35,8,27,33,5,21,0,2,2,1,17,6,0,7,15,129,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175973514852845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893809252142474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21987115784865155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718617269623378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599294695219028,0.0,0.1320657370473089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524126450298174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15882003201675474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27058174494060483,0.12158262962722675,0.08589150850168907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288850482265552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832882138767636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686491864517056,0.0,0.0,0.06607462711812756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747547807921292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851122364164467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275438013903948,0.0,0.28162113251313725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615994464959826,0.0,0.08147017465277939,0.1828789035965116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301961192980312,0.0,0.16670308116223795,0.10497918709114916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514599598469526,0.0,0.12962702613499455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702167460007862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561080051696724,0.120370044588361,0.0,0.09580682071898776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17019718587670987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496380128154685,0.0,0.2899061662058127,0.21017061381557192,0.0,0.0,0.13959495179942635,0.0,0.3081511484204769,0.11812422649155215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297676209916749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744610836365355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418281716608121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848782919421443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13038305015658694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742343216885685
mentalhealth,painfullyrelatable,2020/02/24,"I hate myself [21M] Long story short I hate myself and I don’t know why, I’ve tried to stop having such a low self esteem, but I can’t seem to shake the feeling that the world (and my family) would be better off without me; I’m not going to commit suicide, I don’t want to make my family sad, but I want to stop existing, I have death thought all the time. 
I’ve started working, not because of the money but because I didn’t have anything else to do, I lost all my friends (I moved and no one seemed to even notice I was gone for a couple of months) and although I’m studying something that I like, this situation of only waking up to go to work/study is killing me on the inside. 
I know that people don’t always talk shit about me, but that’s the only thing I can think about, that and the feeling that when I’m gone no one will ever remember me. (Sorry for my horrible English)",6.223978494623657,4.3902312903225855,7.124838709677423,80.79059139784948,66.74193548387098,9.556989247311831,31.41935483870968,7.793537801064563,1.9973483870967748,684,20,148,6,9,231,106,186,0.265,0.65,0.085,-0.9908,0,0,1,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,0,3,6,11,4,1,9,0,15,2,2,1,4,31,37,11,3,3,7,0,2,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,8,5,0,2,9,0,1,6,10,8,0,2,6,2,24,3,20,28,2,20,0,3,0,0,3,6,1,2,9,98,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142982517348899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130392631599037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674722245660462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148772011088853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199118485240976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475039715206856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072794379130883,0.12425403678997506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25899001399765736,0.0,0.1389112172657771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612745681249502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15613479955811824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712379714846767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15197344532562135,0.0,0.15098385207661316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710934657728541,0.0,0.0,0.12156324254907412,0.0,0.0,0.14994955702036358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169185732207437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964301772456707,0.14599670372432574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639037138514478,0.0,0.0,0.1861634538843488,0.20894375445498067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523123491078216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556071786921676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501029278207122,0.14330111114096086,0.0,0.14100266515367066,0.0,0.15440343131976247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574988803601117,0.0,0.15376828961617844,0.09722728624076876,0.0,0.0,0.2296857127833632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025444640419613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040836607437532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912588570549334,0.08801761250800799,0.0,0.10905205367910276,0.08009833317922874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326146535273784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204225906601968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395007788608707,0.0,0.0,0.13241445724615625,0.0,0.2000059554737732,0.0,0.0,0.09757978569923707,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thebeardlesscoffee,2020/02/24,"I'm conflicted - I have always thought I suffer from depression and anxiety (genetically and due to childhood trauma) but I've been called a psycopath/sociopath and I'm afraid it might be true. I have always been diagnosed with depression and anxiety.   


I recently made the horrendous decision of flat out committing identity theft to my own partner. I ruined his credit, maxed out credit cards, and tried to fix it on my own (which didn't happen).  


His friends and family (who are mostly extremely intelligent and educated) have told him that I am likely a psycopath or sociopath because of this and many other things. 

\- I have dealt with rage most of my life (though have made vast improvements in the last year and a half since going on antidepressant medication)

\- I have been impulsive in spending, acting, speaking

\- I have been aggressive

\- I would describe myself as charming (although I genuinely enjoy positive human interaction)  


I'm perplexed. Everything I am reading seems to be pointing to the fact that I do have antisocial personality disorder... but what about the depression?  


\- I do and am able to feel remorse

\- I feel love and loss

\- I'm empathetic to others feelings (although I have made impulsive and reckless decisions without thinking about how they effect others)  


Am I a result of my childhood trauma/abandonment and depression or am I a dangerous psychopath/sociopath?  


Please help",5.6873749999999985,8.851268320833334,6.40333333333334,66.965,72.04166666666666,10.166666666666666,35.0,10.222266870305534,4.842625,1127,60,160,37,24,368,139,240,0.20199999999999999,0.63,0.16899999999999998,-0.8249,0,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,1,2,4,20,3,1,9,0,26,4,0,6,3,44,43,22,0,1,5,0,3,1,2,2,3,1,0,3,12,17,0,1,9,1,3,2,2,12,0,1,10,4,27,8,24,29,4,16,0,7,0,1,15,8,0,6,7,124,39,3,0.13691117787793936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22784213544046375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20947335266850095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345978327078217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398016202007355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47168558755342,0.1389619635884548,0.0,0.0,0.15691207127630402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304693859297998,0.0,0.12906767372052733,0.0,0.2076792157670925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105777236405635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780977750736527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107010244135324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917686765678139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160088326201192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09670441387974732,0.06688788586044253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356768340410933,0.3886460006456907,0.0,0.1388064453091433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792360792558447,0.0,0.14524112383446006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954555961270576,0.0,0.15028735965488824,0.12942531669818375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694822798707515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13518327106689632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463879431584672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325434114170567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095770299916604,0.08772715455311829,0.13451453712905698,0.10869218210811153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13082449766200213,0.0,0.0929537026933734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197748978755755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725777259089248,0.0,0.0,0.08816630974410263
mentalhealth,GummyKoalaBearr,2020/02/24,"What's wrong with me? Hello, I deal with what I thought is a bad habit, but now I kinda doubt it(?)
I'm in my early 20s and since I was something like 13, 14 I have been always picking on my skin. When I started I have been having lots of zits, whiteheads, but now my skin issues come only from picking, with small exceptions. As I'm writing it, I reminded myself of one time I dig this bloody hole on my forehead just to get one little natural, oil filament at age of 12, so I'm not sure when it started. 
Every evening I lock myself in the bathroom and look for something 'suspiciously looking' on my face and breasts. I used to do it on my arms and stomach too, but don't know why, now I'm somehow scared to, as if these places were too fragile. 
I stretch my skin looking for anything odd, and if I find anything I pick. Sometimes I pick a few things, sometimes I spend 1,5 hour in front of the mirror. I even pick on little hairs likely to pop out on my chest, armpits, bikini area, legs. It doesn't get bloody often anymore now that I live with my SO, but I keep on picking. 
I watch these 'blackheads extraction' videos a lot and for some reason I squeeze my jaw really tightly to the point that it hurts and I still feel it after. In fact, as I was writing that I began to feel this. I don't even squeeze my teeth, it's as if I stressed my jaw. 
After picking on myself I always obviously feel regret. And yet I keep on doing that, it somehow satifies me even though I keep in my mind it's wrong and I will feel bad, if I don't already. 
I don't know what else is meaning in this case, so I don't know what else should I write. Does it look like anything?",3.2759399224806214,4.030575101744187,4.304069767441863,89.73375968992252,72.69186046511628,6.779844961240313,27.41472868217053,6.6274283507984215,1.0438007751937983,1281,45,282,9,24,417,162,344,0.14800000000000002,0.8240000000000001,0.027999999999999997,-0.9915,0,0,2,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,0,0,22,13,0,3,6,0,20,16,15,9,3,66,47,27,0,6,11,0,12,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,25,15,0,4,11,1,1,2,7,9,0,2,7,18,52,4,42,38,4,43,0,2,5,1,5,24,0,12,20,191,77,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222982317869623,0.0,0.1692471212147202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008602804625438,0.0,0.0,0.2510743110719896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698325381686809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876065941864964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484949021703492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899942134689667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699166354817049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26869078165825816,0.0,0.0856876626206827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056927666855005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295307090722024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062693778305372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001552137177581,0.0,0.10887325745369987,0.0,0.0,0.10614964893236284,0.0,0.2711901467151313,0.0,0.0,0.16767698931966005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490582341690281,0.2038626768902656,0.08980403887048019,0.0,0.3416136365258168,0.0,0.0,0.17292547758562754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078244128840764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268923856324322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783075492001404,0.07734835922802252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062561269556307,0.0,0.09614052388125947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515240454913114,0.1045657905620794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018206612792842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08412829859695646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15658913279257525,0.2011702104681278,0.0,0.14396929130584954,0.0,0.08121872417957622,0.0,0.11649840176704145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958521945126525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06756577028718634,0.0,0.09992093045745004,0.08073940706700808,0.059302798157077286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783719895996453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176953075895967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223886334232153,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaptainToTheSeaman,2020/02/24,"major depressive disorder with a bad 2 years and now my wife left with our son I've had depression since my early 20s and I've had my ups and downs. Last 2 years things have got really bad and I've had a few major manic episodes thanks to medication and trying to medicate with medicinal marijuana. Thinks have been really bad financially as well. Wife hasn't been happy with our living situation with my mother but she all but refuses to get a job to help contribute financially. I've been an emotional wreck trying to figure out how to make things work on just my income alone. 

Couple days ago she told me she isnt coming back from her parents 2000 miles away. Has blocked all communication with me and removed me and my family from Facebook. She also has my one year old son and no one will let me speak to him or see him on facetime. I saw a post of hers before she blocked me that was informing her mom group friends we are separated since I refuse to move from my mothers and have been emotionally and verbally abusive the last year. She leaves out the fact she doesn't work, wont get a job and that I've been on a mental and emotional rollercoaster with half a dozen different medications trying to get stable and healthy again. 

I feel like my entire life has just fallen apart and all I want to do is fix our family, but it seems she is done with me and our marriage is over. I really dont know how I'm going to keep going. My new medication has been helping somewhat as my suicidal thoughts have been less frequent, but with losing my baby boy and the love of my life and emotional rock is tearing me up inside. 

They were my whole life and this fucking disease and my inability to overcome it has finally did me in. Without my family I feel I've lost whatever hope I had of things getting better. I just want them back and don't want to lose then for good. I just feel it's too late.",5.2476190476190485,5.79337705555556,6.1609656084656095,78.9439880952381,68.12698412698413,9.8978835978836,28.97751322751323,9.928628108626363,2.601944973544974,1509,50,302,34,24,500,194,378,0.136,0.736,0.129,-0.6015,5,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,5,0,2,6,13,18,1,0,11,0,38,9,0,3,4,69,67,31,1,4,10,8,3,1,1,2,7,1,0,1,9,33,0,5,9,1,0,6,8,9,1,4,20,6,53,9,43,44,9,40,0,5,2,2,40,14,1,4,20,205,62,4,0.0,0.0945816096105547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707615706410521,0.0,0.0,0.08267640724192775,0.0,0.06383739898978799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499983099446181,0.12276364024587084,0.19995593002587864,0.0,0.0,0.06792665904080464,0.0,0.0,0.07060024662052157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876365077368919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832674713897823,0.0,0.05148163037634312,0.0,0.13750927359863305,0.0,0.0,0.08340193194804049,0.09148833676253824,0.0,0.0,0.0816904496086378,0.09355632109648644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3591772616046207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257605811163149,0.0,0.12108836417831995,0.057028224580905375,0.0,0.08744626965032977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06167392570485289,0.07379851615178894,0.16682466549310634,0.0,0.09073472894863292,0.06695486522180821,0.06384472014002239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497702760734596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701233522441547,0.0,0.0,0.07928594458222023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15843140388884128,0.07095365638149348,0.0,0.0,0.04387067755735201,0.13013886194762822,0.09004801695049999,0.08452497020815021,0.08673196464112662,0.0816282294293276,0.16915191887069828,0.03899930309478053,0.0,0.07048845608369006,0.0,0.0,0.17861136116183868,0.0871402944808971,0.0,0.07204673126986554,0.0,0.053284955336419484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3216680880384433,0.0804465581215007,0.0,0.0,0.09349208945010133,0.0,0.08484316998715989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709714342225786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837647141387719,0.0,0.10818530254717604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863812549131056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645193143252453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15341712236679328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361156048665192,0.07267124763120081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206697506333262,0.08972857767254275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731747506895084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349371854108105,0.0,0.0,0.1590999767343836,0.05114973879123708,0.0,0.06337349879635258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627785167538366,0.0,0.16259130835819496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412516027451003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177380791096204,0.0,0.0,0.08912368188902141,0.0,0.07695010927168817,0.0,0.11622960550360904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056231613379213
mentalhealth,SoScorpio9,2020/02/24,"Am I dissociating? Sometimes I get into a state that feels very unlike me, and if anyone who knows me is a witness to it, they get really worried. Which always seems odd to me, because I'm completely calm. I wouldn't call it an ""emotional state"". More like an ""emotionless state"". There are emotions leading up to it. This time it was sadness (that's the closest word but it doesn't seem right). I can't remember if anger or other negative emotions have led to it. 

My face feels like a mask hanging from my head. If I'm speaking to someone, my tone comes out flat. If I'm alone, even my inner monologue takes on a flat affect. I'll sit very still or move more slowly and deliberately than usual. I'll feel even more disconnected from my body than usual. 

But my thoughts are clear, objective, so logical as to be divorced from emotion. When I'm in this state I can see patterns and make connections that might usually elude me because I have such strong emotions. I feel as if I can untangle the mess that is human interaction, I can see a sequence of cause and effect like a row of dominoes leading up to the very moment before this state of mind comes over me. 

Even though I know this is out of the ordinary for me (of course I do, this objectivity even extends to looking critically at myself with no bias, negative or positive), it doesn't worry me. If I feel anything at all during this state, it's either slight puzzlement at what may have caused it, or... something I can hardly describe. A sort of serene confidence that borders on a spiritual experience. As though disconnecting from my body and emotions is allowing me to connect with something higher than that. But if I ever consciously think about that, I usually dismiss it because it's not logical enough. I could only come up with these words by intentionally trying to reconnect with emotions. It doesn't feel like I'm having any, but if I really dig deep for them, that's what I come up with. 

People who see me when I'm like this describe it as cold, or sometimes sad. I asked the only person who has seen it more than once what other words they might use, and they came up with ""stoic"". One time they said I was ""cold and calculated."" 

Is this dissociation or something else? I'm diagnosed with major depression, generalized anxiety, dependent personality disorder, and avoidant personality disorder. I suffered from mild PTSD after an emotionally abusive relationship I escaped from almost 2 years ago but I'm mostly asymptomatic now. I suppose any of these conditions could cause dissociation, so if that's what it is, how can I know where it's coming from?",5.5515386844392935,6.989650841784992,6.394706461895107,74.30392292089252,67.9655172413793,9.528809040857725,31.935612865835985,9.819183407551806,3.2184478585917127,2087,88,371,48,35,689,236,493,0.10800000000000001,0.8059999999999999,0.087,-0.9111,0,2,3,0,1,0,68.0,0,0,5,4,18,14,1,1,16,0,33,5,4,14,3,95,72,39,0,12,22,0,7,5,0,4,1,2,0,4,45,24,0,1,18,0,0,11,9,7,0,1,6,16,46,7,59,59,9,53,0,4,5,0,19,20,0,24,20,257,91,2,0.0,0.07379892676315802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055212931889058084,0.0,0.0623706023939211,0.06450968796377064,0.0,0.0,0.05182708337814275,0.0,0.0,0.08471346345317474,0.0,0.04764874983839997,0.0,0.0,0.04355193853924663,0.0,0.05125621107819469,0.0,0.05822916126889685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390721399098246,0.0,0.053000943380635164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13837178770940856,0.0,0.0,0.06360114394588134,0.07123878566335415,0.0,0.19195516341588012,0.0,0.2682701028408255,0.06530586457538785,0.0,0.0,0.0994608775165935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053646987259709976,0.06321915179882256,0.0,0.0,0.14277069489983066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052032102946504274,0.5605084652987986,0.0,0.06435826412168145,0.0,0.16455771234388042,0.056341407038504224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060927826388234935,0.0,0.0,0.18896255533526515,0.08899450509688746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06508390648936582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05579617438924927,0.0,0.06392358034691907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269255091247184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214938320233093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05230469592706486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04157650237337197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321515674939005,0.06289127626936927,0.0,0.0,0.06620034184254202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06633273862956811,0.0422067210126977,0.09474287855773823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043181387965342,0.1631576443985726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280919999251856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980423131854425,0.0,0.0,0.06687203701493667,0.0705580890512848,0.05319204915907009,0.059248411399049274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14890204067072946,0.1134059803762068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05277487001726813,0.1438528109034569,0.12320523027275435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04974181610546852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04683144849896002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03991046295947078,0.12239169226328815,0.049448261830756526,0.07263913365462192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04228822110083669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05379525278217443,0.2743976676977089,0.15417784104008786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650925888049067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04011025157763036
mentalhealth,blahblahblah_shit,2020/02/24,Is there anyone here with whom I can speak about my mental health? I need someone to hear me. I'm confused and I would like to talk to someone. Please,0.37338709677419146,2.7628507741935517,1.1357258064516138,100.72358870967743,89.64516129032259,3.1,17.427419354838708,3.1291,-1.0666193548387095,118,3,26,0,4,36,25,31,0.07400000000000001,0.772,0.154,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,1,5,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,17,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22199910321378732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3374811480873041,0.3578386778627453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15511147268455264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31995915599577596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354176893001763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34851293895848834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5380230689616685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551895545394579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22553854322841416,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LittleSmack,2020/02/24,"I have never felt more alone My mental health

I am a 19 year old male. I have lived my whole life very grateful and I still am to this very day. I have had everything I could every ask for and will never complain about the fortune I have had. 

But recently I just entered college and I am heading into my second semester. Previously I broke up with my girlfriend before the first semester started and sadly got back together w her over winter break. I recently found out she moved on which crushed me. However there is still this girl I really like in college and I recently found out we will never be a thing by having the talk with her about our future.

Along with this going on my roommate who I considered one of my best friends now has a girlfriend and is slowly cutting me out. All my previous friends at college are no longer talking to me as much and I am having huge problems finding people to relate with. And that’s something I’ve never had problems with before. I have always been know to be a social guy yet recently I have never felt more alone.

I keep getting this feeling that I was just lucky before high school w my friend group because I was friends w them for 10+ years. I have never felt more alone in my entire life and I don’t know what to do with myself. I had been thinking terrible thoughts and haven’t been able to sleep. Recently I feel like people don’t care about me and I just don’t matter. Every girl I talk to doesnt give the time of day and every dude I talk to doesn’t really want to be my friend. I have always considered myself an optimistic person but these last couple weeks I see nothing but a bad future.

All of this is severely damaging my mental health and I can’t afford to see a specialist. I just don’t know what to do with my life. I feel like I need to find people that care about me. I know my friends do but it doesn’t feel the same for some reason. I know I am being over dramatic but I can’t escape this whole. I just don’t know what to do and that’s why I am asking for advice.",2.374938929313932,4.267252120192307,3.7434225571725577,88.24955041580044,77.07692307692307,6.6126819126819125,23.022089397089395,7.534196372845213,0.9776346933471936,1606,49,328,22,37,527,182,416,0.057999999999999996,0.8059999999999999,0.136,0.9721,2,3,1,0,0,0,24.0,2,0,1,2,15,22,1,0,12,0,52,7,2,1,8,75,83,20,0,5,10,0,7,3,8,2,5,0,0,5,18,27,0,1,20,0,0,3,18,9,0,3,16,9,65,13,46,60,11,47,0,3,2,0,30,14,0,2,32,244,83,4,0.06800162687535805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645040276134627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21128753167570816,0.0,0.0,0.11316560211409675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714468316719105,0.0,0.0,0.05228905357722678,0.05677851801107181,0.041453160574936976,0.0,0.17359312774334815,0.0,0.07136351203870854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866438134056794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05429376571723395,0.0752425067259691,0.0,0.08771084740075175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17188291058582136,0.0,0.06111547746535869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753466307381151,0.0971607516542466,0.1958766776384431,0.0,0.12430451002146807,0.05784214908153236,0.0,0.1491205478898359,0.31522732943143644,0.0,0.035528043378729036,0.06523335687422399,0.03864689165137228,0.0,0.05438711307906116,0.0,0.0,0.06733230180715191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978928764394586,0.14456509893814815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718474523422059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06044297045283877,0.0,0.0,0.22423149440710166,0.055430401959652965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14409468032727474,0.0996664799893505,0.0,0.060046682378499076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13705929147405266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227496760824638,0.04998902012085865,0.05042234468259254,0.31468228088158084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524939500092487,0.0,0.0713562683007952,0.0,0.046079662266678735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143129761613804,0.05937639764254025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13013674619881338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712716691505387,0.06991699808283093,0.3357170138101155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882127683145442,0.10837698483869848,0.0,0.0,0.07682248247561146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805073683702731,0.06931909495262435,0.0,0.052350974627551866,0.0,0.0,0.04813190150483113,0.0,0.10861237412788673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21862852730627252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04517725927610738,0.04357269671638154,0.0,0.053985695883602684,0.03965229548561863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11221692775732063,0.040109121392486166,0.0,0.054546803284510656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061360891278560474,0.15184277585647765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758163637363263
mentalhealth,Gaymbers,2020/02/24,"What do I do about intrusive suicidal thoughts? They’re really getting out of control and I’m just more worried than usual? [20m] 
I feel like such a burden to anyone I’m around. I hate myself and it’s just too easy to focus on what I dislike than what I like about me, which isn’t much. 

The self harm hasn’t been great and I’ve just been doing stuff that isn’t outwardly noticeable because that’s not the kind of attention I want. But night time is always the worse. I just cycle through trauma and sad memories and just more evidence that I shouldn’t be here. I know I sound so pathetic and I am. But I don’t know what to do. 

I am in therapy fyi which helps in someways I guess. I’m not on any meds as I just don’t like them and all of them mess with my sleep.

I’m not brave enough to kill myself so no worries there but the pain is just too much. All I do is think about ways to kill myself in a way where maybe my family will think I just ran away or ran off with the some guy because they’re all that’s really stopping me. But they hate me too. 

I live with my grandma who’s sick and anytime I go to my parents house they seem so annoyed to see me. Sometimes they’re okay but mostly they just seem to think it better if I’m not there. My mom just says I’m too much Alot and I know she’s right. My younger brother hates me and doesn’t care how I am tho I hope he’s well. 

The more I type this out the more I think I should just do it. I’ve been stock piling meds to use if I wanted an out but it still scares me. I don’t wanna vegetate myself I just want to die even if nothing comes after. I just feel like such a waste.

I just wish I could turn off this fear and just swallow the pills I have. I even have some nausea pills to try and keep everything down long enough to work. I just didn’t think life would be like this when I was younger. I thought it would be better. I didn’t think I’d only be good as a sex object or be assaulted and recorded when I was 14. I didn’t think I’d always be this little bitch just feeling bad for himself. I really thought it would just be better but I didn’t deal with any of the bullying or the trauma when it was happening and now that’s it’s all caught up to me I just think it’s too late.

Anyway sorry for posting this. It’s 2am here and I can’t sleep and my heart is just racing and I’m sure this won’t be read anyway and that’s okay.",-0.05564285714285688,1.874691580952384,1.821678571428574,98.69994642857144,85.57142857142857,5.121428571428573,17.18452380952381,6.367922702773337,-0.4714047619047626,1860,41,456,18,56,612,216,525,0.192,0.6970000000000001,0.111,-0.9942,1,0,0,0,0,3,34.0,0,0,5,5,51,36,8,2,16,2,49,11,3,3,5,111,96,41,4,15,37,3,3,5,0,7,5,2,0,2,30,27,2,3,20,1,0,5,19,18,1,0,16,6,68,18,47,64,17,38,0,1,1,1,17,18,1,14,17,309,98,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733782497387705,0.0,0.0,0.104069411965797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05350300234454728,0.0,0.0,0.06811703601527966,0.0,0.0,0.07189096162145915,0.0,0.06388913993035132,0.09328904202857256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20302124229998292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780149638732699,0.0,0.0,0.06591328157909783,0.0,0.0,0.08582118298075761,0.06109321124897375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888645867670924,0.0,0.0,0.07941336233738902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812661716953644,0.0,0.10107852789852267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876923576859006,0.0,0.07213414153724246,0.08610376193578836,0.116069047443476,0.10932861715351233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03997737550023039,0.0,0.04348681077068923,0.06417947323623198,0.0,0.08436110908691079,0.08429294787711622,0.07576462018876443,0.06766440932640788,0.0,0.0,0.2266363624219949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067392321435268,0.05128824680424455,0.0,0.0,0.07599940857869973,0.0,0.08829123052294906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068012507764195,0.16931114595205832,0.07968148025075286,0.12615649214526475,0.0,0.08631537491271052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05404676226815989,0.1869135813291068,0.0766909052344368,0.06756659080262017,0.06771581659391981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687238240198824,0.0,0.1699879805709275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961668480377742,0.0,0.0,0.16874809065251953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180674158706869,0.0,0.07342086186138133,0.08711598575117252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819521040419241,0.08142029980045506,0.0,0.08496392583023865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328287004950587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653847455471027,0.0,0.147057724129542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534575558110693,0.0,0.06085000012111087,0.07660763416032762,0.0,0.06097475411597542,0.13931780392475807,0.07982471967880336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314605595364605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567802886894975,0.08565537640546582,0.0,0.0,0.06110718817520994,0.06397228008624069,0.0,0.0,0.0875945373697187,0.08369801859324452,0.0,0.07211709056326676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875047360232074,0.0,0.0,0.3922359674287821,0.0,0.1822396814516527,0.044618125720476236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051950541550886783,0.08322935869280115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660867835569824,0.08427351083889767,0.0,0.13539648579564734,0.12147248487802105,0.0,0.0,0.06879866263077276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799165665707441,0.0,0.0,0.055705846251535636,0.15541501484234313,0.07797814244327968,0.16306808044420326,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,badaboopbadabing,2020/02/24,"don't want to live, but i don't want to kill myself either idk where to start. i get no joy out of life and i don't see the point in it. i don't want to be alive, but i don't hate my life or myself enough to kill myself. i think about it everyday, but i never go through with it. i'm filled with shame, regret, and self hatred. 

i'm self aware and smart enough to know i'm in a bad place, but i'm too indifferent to care or do anything about it. i've ruined relationships and burned bridges and turned into a man i loathe. i don't respect or like myself and if my 10 year old self could see the 27 year old me now, he'd shake his head. 

i know that i could get out of this funk if i worked hard and actually made an effort, but it's easier to just cruise through life drunk high or stoned and try to distract myself from having to put in an effort and be uncomfortable. 

i have lots of opportunities to do better and have lots of things i should be grateful for, and that makes me feel even more guilt and shame, because with all that i have i still can't make anything work and be happy. i don't see it getting better. idk what to do",4.929852433281005,3.772722902040819,5.679183673469389,87.91268445839876,68.95918367346938,8.681318681318682,25.376766091051806,7.321109707123232,0.8197095761381474,881,16,214,7,13,289,122,245,0.22,0.596,0.184,-0.3615,1,0,0,0,0,3,21.0,0,0,0,7,8,20,3,5,6,0,23,5,1,3,2,50,48,24,2,9,13,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,0,4,12,19,1,0,4,2,0,5,10,11,0,0,1,5,28,9,31,39,7,24,0,2,3,0,7,10,0,8,10,138,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.1114600799928234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879830066744924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536707783782952,0.06962610032201216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20203269432292964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645264187823408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18238721131307625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360350041380957,0.0,0.07543976838896403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05775194289239007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902223219339766,0.0,0.06491259816939716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158695376338648,0.1023166988155264,0.11276641402875365,0.11722039708202694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12067735862061033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25273010800308743,0.0,0.12554221285266706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420261936408538,0.05580103935971825,0.0,0.10085639486358353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942077491025049,0.0,0.1080756278462518,0.1524825139968366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809179547203468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23970469929954846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11933327311000093,0.0,0.10797272328636236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482041897337547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12262715401786292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730503554247221,0.0,0.3574621725988306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084393460919295,0.0,0.09121446896153412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588121974307599,0.07318614336754957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754637713392007,0.12423614932838167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20210582289757664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663038125504204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14710501481528604
mentalhealth,stressedboutthots,2020/02/24,"Mental health is so shit I had to ask my bf for.space from our relationship and I feel guilty but I'm just unable to take care of myself lately. My apartment is a huge mess, I sleep almost all day after studying. Aside from doing dishes and waking up on time for school I've just been lethargic and unhappy.",3.5872131147541,5.3898041147540985,4.4499672131147525,84.88806557377049,73.42622950819671,6.191475409836067,22.036065573770493,6.742157984588678,0.6091022950819673,245,6,46,2,5,79,50,61,0.207,0.6890000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.7358,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,1,0,5,5,3,0,1,9,10,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,7,1,9,8,1,8,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,1,4,30,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873581855782372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682774494351139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29258420900406906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18507138357900416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14510024209915634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30503482374848645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237137395173233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891974420172291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3080975088418548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904281351809576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945697439434129,0.0,0.0,0.28717643012741906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21576511292399228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16733403917709824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsalwayanew,2020/02/24,"Bad mindset and intern? I started an internship a little under 2 months ago and i’ve been dealing with a lot personally following my SA that was a few months ago. I’ve had to leave early a few days / call out “sick” because of my mental health. 

unfortunately all of this led to a really bad breakdown last week and I had to call out “sick” one day and had to leave early another day because I was having a panic attack. 

I did tell the internship coordinator at work while I was mid-panic attack that I had a lot going on personally and I didn’t feel right being at work (i said it better than that but it had the same idea!). I was told I could leave early and take as much time as I needed and I’ll be taking at least 2 days off this upcoming week which is okay. 

I’m not really sure how long it’s appropriate to take off for mental health. I’m in therapy currently and getting help but the healing process isn’t quick. I really don’t feel like myself at work and like my work isn’t up to a good enough standard because i’m so anxious and distracted. Since i’m an intern i’m not sure how bad I would look if I withdrew for mental health (i know they can’t really hold it against me, but it really does impact the relationships i’m building!). Would taking 1-2 weeks off be better (if needed) in order to get my mental health back in a better place? I really love this company and my role but I’m so unfocused!",2.7738877307921403,4.159770030821921,4.919523525908279,82.40439249553306,74.71917808219176,8.091959499702204,23.31209053007743,8.716276077567194,1.5180555092316856,1107,31,229,22,23,385,140,292,0.147,0.743,0.11,-0.623,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,7,6,17,2,2,15,1,24,8,0,3,3,42,49,24,0,7,8,0,2,2,0,2,7,1,0,2,12,14,0,1,4,0,0,3,7,7,0,1,14,4,24,10,31,29,9,44,0,0,1,1,13,18,0,4,24,142,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910113422755727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822727556666413,0.0,0.08863811864045343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17852046563353022,0.0,0.06033134032145662,0.19653391247642496,0.14348651774808913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081760119092617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16023404224971974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06264438601823327,0.0,0.0,0.2024023240964828,0.08088940928012184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866137931735501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810707494598447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934405000893759,0.05605225159873483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08198482586309824,0.0,0.044590953805308135,0.06580900911351134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335996957665737,0.0,0.0,0.05259047061562809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857244072487032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04311988097688423,0.06395584192098362,0.0,0.2492352654128997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766637490578968,0.07863811008419544,0.0,0.06943514127882182,0.06588712354110722,0.0,0.0,0.1334087528936002,0.07081373368507599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31627922834465444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12525296736582756,0.0,0.05767755158913738,0.11635504675403682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053166917278448515,0.0,0.0,0.09205658136206796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13701749823960846,0.08197460306238255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015831267991707,0.0,0.0,0.08423729621509485,0.0,0.06700490371333602,0.07463397563589594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490339975104513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553479995039543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478963298015558,0.0,0.2359703562496654,0.0,0.06857800223650343,0.0,0.08972650724680131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04575099317750347,0.0,0.0,0.07497244329347669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18880902563353852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284809368970384,0.0,0.0,0.11147228494252252,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChickenCowChicken,2020/02/24,"does anyone know what could help me get better? to start, i’d like to clarify that i’ve been diagnosed with depression around 5 years ago, and anxiety a few months ago. i don’t know if my problems are due to those or something different. 

my first problem is that i can’t show affection. it doesn’t come naturally to me. i have a girlfriend i love so much but it never crosses my mind to tell her. i think she’s beautiful but i never think to tell her. i never think to hold her hand or anything. i don’t know why and i don’t know how to fix it. she gets so upset with me over this and i promise to try to fix it and i do try but it just never gets better. i need to fix it but i don’t even know where to start. 

another problem is that when i get upset it feels like i lose control completely. if i’m angry i’ll hit things and scream until someone finally calms me down. if i’m sad i’ll try to take medicine to fall asleep because i’m too scared to be sad for a while. 

i constantly feel like my life is just floating by me. it seems like the last year is just one big blur. my memory is terrible and i’m having trouble differentiating days and what actually happened and what i made up. i feel emotions but they feel different? like they’re very small compared to what they used to be. any emotion other than sadness or anger is just overshadowed by nothingness. 

i understand i have a problem and i want to fix it but i don’t know where to start or what’s wrong with me.",1.1185483870967765,3.147654790322584,3.0409677419354857,91.07145161290323,81.74193548387099,6.580645161290324,22.58064516129032,7.717688229018142,0.9556129032258064,1155,39,258,20,31,387,149,310,0.2,0.672,0.128,-0.9828,4,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,5,13,27,1,3,5,0,22,5,2,5,4,65,57,28,0,10,17,0,5,5,1,0,2,1,0,0,21,14,0,2,15,1,0,3,12,17,0,2,2,6,40,10,31,51,2,32,0,5,0,1,12,8,0,9,26,163,61,0,0.0,0.0,0.09002591508961245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355397202069907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273540888589743,0.0967356308997076,0.07057352355015382,0.0,0.0,0.06450565378060262,0.0,0.07591660708595198,0.08212499764903892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056236756657754884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631810975338684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794680510395315,0.09672583199360296,0.09969304591636342,0.10346992269234197,0.0736567549572879,0.0,0.0,0.059495747888809174,0.0,0.07945763386465123,0.09363515965112196,0.0,0.1927701310291217,0.0,0.0,0.08073148629688562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075450956739816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06093243593403299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865841656465782,0.13181155481707754,0.0,0.10105898307609903,0.0,0.07847061158531846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19279417079948752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157929032038844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06183544373946464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042000130045832,0.07519875404461322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516123548322265,0.2253515174057639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032078474989882,0.0,0.0,0.08326220689806338,0.08729230497923275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314953659746647,0.0,0.07363570553834384,0.0,0.06781679179840475,0.06840465452332302,0.2846057350673901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251322499470674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3530958038765083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236164905801372,0.0,0.0,0.08398394138305966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07816592344293596,0.07102109899687452,0.0,0.0,0.19589208602145267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936300206696365,0.0,0.16126690441899336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061288994642083774,0.17733657276131806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18790180925264505,0.0,0.0,0.09603894090828276,0.0,0.0796772329176549,0.0,0.07611863572816238,0.05441338774224516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324425600545672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008645036118286,0.0,0.11881620373742614
mentalhealth,TheFckingNSA,2020/02/24,"I can’t convince my dumbass to get help. I really want help but I’m too fucking worried about hospitalization or even worse, anyone finding out. I know that if I get hospitalized I could just lie to everyone about why I’m gone, or I could even lie about why I’m there if they find out, but I’m a really bad lier. It’s so stressful.",1.9649047619047584,3.5865878714285766,4.46857142857143,83.80476190476192,77.42857142857143,8.095238095238095,24.523809523809533,8.841846274778883,1.7390952380952378,261,9,57,6,6,92,44,70,0.276,0.638,0.086,-0.9598,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,9,4,1,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,15,13,7,0,5,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,8,1,7,10,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,2,1,4,0,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14770639328102084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17637953040779955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33732155176749873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27904872885264176,0.0,0.0,0.20185225300313028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3861455330849393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952912467556274,0.22073205948158808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831841811185338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609392387467005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.270656039018886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419787588232514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12459691172102492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38122887205354994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21452806663305274,0.2152752120503079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gsgkxcho-throwaway,2020/02/24,"how can i stop having violent fantasies? hey, i didnt know where to post this so i hope this is fine.

i'm 15, but please don't believe that makes me unimportant. i've been diagnosed with severe anxiety and depression and have attempted suicide in the past.

as the title says, i'm having constant violent fantasies. i try not to think about it, but it always comes back. sometimes it feels kind of suffocating, i have to stop what i'm doing and breathe. it's like voices are telling me to murder and showing me what it would look like, but there's no voices and it's just my thoughts and i'm just thinking about it in my head and not actually seeing it.

my most common fantasies are burning down houses or trees/forests and school shootings.

i am not going to act on these. i DO NOT under any circumstance want to commit arson or murder. but it always just comes to me again, and i start thinking of how it would feel to do it. i try REALLY hard not to think about it, but i can't. it just keeps getting stronger.

before this started, i wanted to run away. now though, i know i am a danger by thinking these thoughts and if i were free to live on my own no one would stop me. i fully believe that the only way to stop this is by killing myself.

i have stayed free of self harm for 1 week easy enough but now it's all i want to do. i can't fucking take it right now, it feels like my head is going to explode.

my dad keeps cancelling my therapist appointments. i'm off my meds, but this violence ideation started whilst i was on a dose. i do know that getting off my meds is probably what caused this all to get so worse.

i feel like i'm suffocating. i can't trust myself right now. please, if you know absolutely anything to help me, tell me. i will do anything to stop this.

i started rambling in the middle of writing this, sorry if there are typos",2.785553363074812,4.419138603723408,3.858939601921758,88.99903225806453,75.19680851063829,6.660123541523678,25.42690459849005,7.359569317364363,1.1087454701441315,1449,50,304,17,31,469,173,376,0.223,0.6659999999999999,0.111,-0.9953,0,0,0,1,0,2,42.0,0,1,0,1,21,19,7,0,6,0,33,6,3,4,3,72,76,28,4,10,21,1,5,4,0,4,2,3,0,1,32,13,0,7,15,4,2,6,12,9,0,1,6,10,43,12,40,66,5,44,0,1,2,1,9,15,1,7,24,207,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.08255662814596347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14078664436441796,0.0,0.0,0.05753036575993225,0.0,0.06471816626224673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13923588768988396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948374529636218,0.0650515726740609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198769909802641,0.19062868525276971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690669550952226,0.0,0.14574946186605414,0.0,0.09142169465606828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286517805225863,0.08586642023034034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741360165592194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17110361572971958,0.12087538910926715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821060905445783,0.132598791011116,0.0,0.0961593644900366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578427772328737,0.0,0.17364639848896896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05670506908991869,0.0,0.0,0.0840261070084282,0.0,0.09761613310641433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503913349375061,0.0935964945882126,0.08809706169234861,0.1859740596591418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16532360848386782,0.0,0.07470265486469628,0.0,0.0710420319270587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056470631492499576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18794130786963212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05732661606333881,0.06434151354924039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075952125359266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572906205690767,0.0,0.0,0.08102266051568094,0.0,0.09121226007362812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054196422030175315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444945310414842,0.0,0.06727668961192869,0.0,0.08561891992768521,0.06741461953425645,0.0,0.08825542939197004,0.09557303029750217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367078469228377,0.09470189253170114,0.23951903310377895,0.09017150460103834,0.0,0.35364365016954497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253780783605277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360807955164842,0.0,0.1478868817619567,0.0,0.0,0.09822620658777484,0.0,0.2710387980979822,0.08311829707890615,0.13432465033796034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148746245565926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14969642286425325,0.06715091738096063,0.06786038559216624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621382539408147,0.18029056058870227,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wecantchoose,2020/02/24,"cycle I don't know where to start lol. I'm in no way able to cope with problems that I've made for myself. let me rephrase it's all a cycle or a videogame like dark souls but every time I fail or even when I succeed its means nothing to me. I'm trying to find conclusions to what is wrong without the cliche I am who I am, like even when I better myself I come to the same plausible conclusions. to explain I'm never okay and sometimes I realize its the fight I have with my own greed of wanting it all friends, a significant other, or just my life intact. I don't know what's wrong with me but even in some of my relationships I just wouldn't care about the girl. I don't know it not like I feel emotionless its more like I feel as if I'm never trying to achieve anything and am satisfied with whatever I have even when I shouldn't be. to be clear I don't wanna hear the same everything will get better or put yourself out there I've made efforts and it's just never simple with people humans we have to overcomplicate things with meaningless gestures and bald-faced lies. You're brought up as a child believing in absolutes when in the real world there are no absolutes left is right and right is left what's the point in living a sitcom life where the situations are not easily fixable and there is no sense of truth to one's character. I lie to everyone like its a game of poker and even, in the end, I'm not willing to show who I am not because of the fear and vulnerability but of the realization that I don't really care about everyone even if I present myself as a clown so people won't know that I only act as the clown so they can't see me for my true role an observer of people. I don't want to sound as if I'm psychotic because I'm not it's just I'm very sparing in my own connection with emotions towards others. I'm just in this cycle of not knowing who i am and knowing who i am and being ashamed of it.",4.777409240924094,4.651072004950496,5.987871287128716,82.11451320132015,69.04950495049505,9.307590759075909,29.45709570957096,9.075114841892004,2.167280858085808,1526,51,328,26,24,514,178,404,0.14400000000000002,0.735,0.122,-0.8489,0,0,0,0,1,0,18.0,1,0,1,8,24,22,2,2,20,2,31,2,0,2,8,76,62,31,0,9,22,0,2,5,1,5,2,2,0,3,24,20,0,0,14,3,1,4,23,8,0,1,3,5,39,14,52,50,8,35,1,1,1,0,16,19,0,8,16,229,63,3,0.09738105372381804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013630981118522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187251729835541,0.0,0.0,0.10971510027888272,0.0,0.17225125686265158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19857294875689308,0.0,0.0,0.08388515507529046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954057830779902,0.08625070937122202,0.0,0.0,0.3859156053719441,0.0,0.0820477377727244,0.18610354001296947,0.08751981192037545,0.0,0.0,0.10958075898378536,0.09847757347207976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900451889703208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523636054287358,0.0,0.05087758131592398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975552498615072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211084823522466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21160959960809192,0.09957872520085176,0.13756623629006712,0.2378773197121806,0.0,0.08598925454174096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18428861521770265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607651573937968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22531881595002995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343974742954607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598792224473829,0.07406267951530589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20253528370182716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205657210724227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318051681511914,0.0,0.09789485581995468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108409585635429,0.06238479659986994,0.0,0.0,0.10455080785738713,0.0,0.1663257755982056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760009185035499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946038449177986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963123521599522,0.0,0.06892681104325123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469564501339448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05678367554404784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223068643644692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034956789112782,0.11487573708482013,0.07729654773101909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387186073875464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21294179022614967,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JayLyle1,2020/02/24,"Depression and Anxiety Not sure if this is not allowed here but, I wanted to share a video trying to talk about mental health and depression any thoughts? [https://youtu.be/94T7xpxnYBQ](https://youtu.be/94T7xpxnYBQ)",13.12505747126437,18.24233024137931,7.304137931034482,59.91298850574714,56.93103448275862,9.383908045977012,30.356321839080447,9.725611199111238,3.725749425287357,183,6,21,4,3,47,25,29,0.292,0.628,0.08,-0.7529,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,10,3,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,2,3,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,14,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250105703013726,0.0,0.2531232212270979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5699750054455096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3517112552483576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334504372207714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118516261329414,0.0,0.0,0.2659497843420974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26268272223576866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246466230763749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19516231144967625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,USAFboi,2020/02/24,"Mental health resources I'm looking for some resources to help out my cousin, he's going through a rough time. I'm not really in the position to help him besides talking to him,anyone know anything good in America (specifically California)?Any call lines or medical that he can use to help pay for it?  Any help would be great.",6.579262295081969,7.706270491803282,6.800122950819674,73.4710040983607,65.39344262295081,10.034426229508195,34.92213114754098,10.125756701596842,3.6636524590163937,264,12,46,6,4,85,48,61,0.02,0.715,0.265,0.9498,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,1,0,7,9,1,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,10,7,1,5,0,0,1,0,10,3,0,2,1,22,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018391448356702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15517816588726924,0.0,0.18262895044906927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22661468574952645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261275674255697,0.18614381451482329,0.0,0.24467789856015096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359005276308941,0.0,0.0,0.5950182772475672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196657014874372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18636476477250394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22357047810045905,0.2236525925893002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217362833224284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17837840988432865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940879224017465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916757081354076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15765224709654724,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,8875642158,2020/02/24,"God Told Me Mercy Mercy Kill Mercy Euthanize

​

They're of no help. It takes time but I don't have time. I see things. Hear them. The voice of God. He commands me. I do not obey. It angers him. He punishes me. It repeats. He sends his hounds after me. They smell me. I can see them following me. They are near. I don't have much longer.",-1.8306866197183105,-0.7708817183098589,0.2673855633802837,101.04924735915495,119.7042253521127,3.4651408450704224,12.888204225352116,5.602791699666715,-1.0288246478873242,262,6,61,3,16,85,45,71,0.11199999999999999,0.693,0.19399999999999998,0.5028,0,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,4,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,7,0,0,1,0,3,13,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,1,5,17,0,4,12,1,7,0,0,2,0,13,1,0,0,4,37,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29565053878934383,0.3315624399801132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30754016883357643,0.0,0.1828965394720588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018861495390149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20058813825749566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4348782505877603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20516151058756435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18128025530128955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182210857450878,0.0,0.0,0.2607354578429509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315624399801132,0.0
mentalhealth,17s54d,2020/02/24,"Can't cry, feel like I shouldn't be sad, have no one to talk too. I (M14) moved four years ago from New York, where I grew up it was hard moving but eventually I got used too it. I moved all the way to Europe so it wasn't easy to visit. Recently I revisited and had a blast, found this girl I really liked, had the most fun I had in a long time with freinds, but I'm back. Revisiting showed me how bad I wanna move back. Here I have no good friends and everything feels dull and I hate it. This darkness creeps on me knowing that things will stay the way they are, that the happiness that NY  grants me being with my friends from there, are out of reach. I can't move back. My family loves it here and they know I want to move out but I haven't told them how I truly feel, how sad I am here. And how here I'm so lonely, so I stay up on my phone reading sad stuff all night, listening to sad music. I'm not someone who would be thought of as sad. If you ask the people I know, they'll tell you I'm the least likely to be depressed out of the people that they know. The sadness that engulfs me is terrible, but all I want to do is cry. I wish I could just have that torrential downfall go down my eyes, and I can't sum it up in words but I manage to cry a few times and it feels so good. It's like a way to release the sadness and feel. When you cry you feel the emotion, and that emotion is good, but when I can't it's this terrible bleak emptiness that eats me from inside and I so t know what to do anymore. It sucks that I can't be with this girl I like, my friends, the places I love to go and I would do anything to move back. The worst is I can't cry about it. I also hate the fact the I feel sad. When I think about it, I feel weak, the thought that I'm sad over something so stupid, makes me think the girl I like would think it's pathetic I'm sad. My life is in order, I don't have anything that would make my life look bad. I have good grades, come from a good family, I am very privileged, haven't had any traumatic events. I feel weak, like I'm sad over something I shouldn't be. I wish I had someone to talk to but I'm not close enough to anyone to do so. I'm ranting into bleak endlessness, talking into oblivion, making no sense. I don't think I can describe how I feel very well.",1.467119238476954,2.6249391162324685,2.9433862725450908,96.17928782565131,77.67735470941884,6.352725450901804,21.092234468937875,6.853354925485097,0.10432701402805566,1765,43,440,17,40,578,192,499,0.18,0.603,0.218,0.9666,2,2,2,0,0,0,56.0,0,4,5,0,32,46,4,0,21,0,51,8,1,9,4,81,103,36,0,13,11,0,11,7,3,8,4,1,0,3,32,21,1,0,22,2,0,12,18,25,1,2,12,14,67,21,46,76,8,53,0,14,2,2,27,19,1,2,23,280,99,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408314572586514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04879099377030966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04149001359035564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060507161622683235,0.042660763666650864,0.0,0.10041477741728372,0.0,0.05703765597393954,0.0,0.0,0.187656768641686,0.10188435713877572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05255613338913639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04871283727117536,0.0,0.33509215844199075,0.0,0.0,0.05254924399867841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06243014863994788,0.0,0.13725978666667896,0.0,0.06304134299824078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05483333618863736,0.0,0.1150327058134024,0.0,0.3084932299756604,0.04358673433270492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689612414230017,0.14141234632714528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693486524347847,0.2558683830815031,0.04879658933342988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494803501114918,0.05465445371571687,0.12047274448003648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765203386046776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618866422566708,0.20865046964926826,0.0,0.0,0.053993389559789794,0.05123441909686228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013079079620744,0.0,0.12217724868237645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4539200924009033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058925430922174636,0.0,0.05725529967068109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041343072447725546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459559085423354,0.0,0.06374418767844206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102815975367847,0.0,0.03908562472840554,0.0,0.060241643020557976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033899446434992,0.09393949652712667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13006060023923974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984374135033984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471165574834125,0.05332687054122882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04053342866170297,0.15637520489300893,0.0,0.09687286869160186,0.0711527665065376,0.0,0.0,0.058299245345218416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05269447566059557,0.0,0.10068200038625157,0.0719725028342181,0.1452846216744192,0.0,0.0,0.05485679977681028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403207709769619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733637001429209,0.0,0.0,0.039289501697409364
mentalhealth,leo2025,2020/02/24,"I’m just numb TW: self harm
Though I’ve never been to a therapist or had any diagnosis, I felt this was a good place to talk. For the past few days I’ve been completely void of any emotions, other than a few seconds of crying here or there. Recently I talked with my friend about my feelings and I guess that made them suddenly collapse. I’ve resorted to cutting, and I’m not proud. My whole family has awful mental health ie. anxiety depression bipolar. They’ve all been to therapy but my parents don’t seem to notice that I might be in pain too. I drank a very caffeinated drink in hopes of feeling anything, then all I had was fidgety nervousness. When that was gone I was numb again. I haven’t shared anything more than feeling sad with anyone. When I think I don’t feel ashamed of being numb or sad or anything, but when it comes to talking to someone I can’t bring myself to expose my feelings. When I get asked if I’m ok I never fail saying some variation of yea I’m fine. I’m not suicidal so don’t worry too much, but sometimes I wonder how much better it would be to fall asleep and not wake up. I’m waiting to go to a doctors appt. to try and get therapy, but for now I’m stuck over sharing on reddit. Sorry to waste you time.",2.4224516821760917,4.2068123976377985,3.8717823908375095,87.86754473872585,76.5984251968504,6.980386542591268,25.324982104509665,7.84624498591911,1.384770078740158,975,35,202,15,22,322,149,254,0.215,0.6579999999999999,0.127,-0.9677,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,1,3,15,21,1,2,6,3,20,11,2,2,4,41,49,21,1,3,13,1,6,0,1,2,7,1,0,1,7,7,2,1,9,1,0,5,10,12,0,1,14,7,22,9,30,30,9,25,0,4,0,0,12,6,0,11,14,128,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15970804756272122,0.0,0.08983092527791339,0.0,0.0,0.08210731550976437,0.0,0.28989592904388856,0.0,0.10977789454459884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038541668456972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115250303239257,0.12311941574075501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898745926366334,0.07573035628800685,0.0,0.10113924332235964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019096400170592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11503323221140865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208896937133438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069922170130286,0.0,0.2968717480559154,0.0,0.11274782253780258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072339654291148,0.0,0.12270096404353532,0.0,0.0667361668690784,0.09849174863725804,0.0,0.0,0.1293584913613705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12481884252440922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663097667943767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111117616276252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833825898964953,0.1245709239504188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726439279257732,0.0,0.18113305978222344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369081013347353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495003928124207,0.0,0.1303881942954664,0.0,0.11209684912601676,0.0,0.0,0.12268566429154056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594446899651255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933822391225572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069006446527332,0.1225014140690363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949506379813136,0.0,0.11613777771731312,0.13144931513077915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844549500086194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28314883663096985,0.0,0.0,0.26857479597080464,0.1363411779710237,0.0,0.0752421381060003,0.11537090689292682,0.0,0.06847231679436465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972486251430902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968891325582448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13110245603752382,0.0,0.0,0.12734399358041246,0.0,0.11925227650253052,0.0,0.08341639250062495,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,therowaweyaccount,2020/02/24,"do i have social anxiety? and how bad is it? hello! 17M here idk if that’s relevantso for the past few years i feel like i have social anxiety, but i’m not that certain. or idk what i have tbh.

whenever i’m out on a public setting or what not i always fear of who i’m going to meet and find possible routes to evade seeing them. maybe there’s another entrance to the mall/exit that no one really uses, so i would use that way to avoid seeing people, this happens rarely, but still occurs. most commonly during the weekdays, when my friends/seniors/juniors are in school(i’m not bc i’m on like this programme), i would usually go out and buy stuff early in the morning like usually 10? or 11 as they would still be in school. i overthink a lot, is this normal? as much as possible i do not want to engage in any form of communication AT ALL with them. However, when i’m with my classmates and close friends, i’m not afraid of those things at all. I feel safe around them. All my worries would disappear if my friend was with me. 

This gets worse when i’m with my family members. Whenever they display affection to me or like idk(i’m a person that doesent show affection yet idk i still love them??? idk i’m that type of person that doesent show it) i feel super super uncomfortable/disturbed and like i fear of what others think of me. it’s so bad, and i feel bad about it. Sometimes I wish they would even disappear.

Long story short my mom loves me a lot, but she just doesent know how to show it. Asian problems I guess. A few months back I self harmed myself bc she kept commenting on how I look, how I behaved and made comments about my appearance and idk if she even fucking realises it lmao. and when i self harmed/have a breakdown, she would demand me to come out of the door and she would apologise and what not and sometimes push the blame onto me. I don’t know what to do even lol what the fuck and she thinks it’s my friends that are at fault when i feel depressed or down when in reality it’s all her. i cant even tell her bc she would just get angry and all and idek whats wrong with me urgh....my close friends were the sole reason i felt safe and without them idt i would even make it this far. 

I would also want to learn ways of becoming more open. I’m very susceptible to others perception about me, I’m very afraid of what others think of me and judge me. This plays a huge role in my life and I don’t know how to make it go away. Any tips? I’m enrolling in this programme in like a college? And I have tons of presentations, i’m very fearful about that.... I want to be more sociable and I need to be more confident. Tips?...

 idk what to even describe this, can someone help? Is this social anxiety or what? am i just a sensitive fuck",1.073183091418386,3.4107486024955453,2.564497071555895,92.53677361853836,84.36541889483065,5.914845938375349,21.3824802648332,7.2636822038024595,0.6717015024191499,2150,70,463,33,63,698,236,561,0.15,0.67,0.18,0.988,1,1,0,0,0,0,72.0,0,0,8,2,36,36,3,6,17,1,32,6,0,13,6,115,84,49,0,20,22,1,6,6,4,10,1,0,1,4,45,33,0,4,16,4,1,8,11,17,0,1,5,9,68,19,61,66,16,58,0,1,3,5,40,27,3,14,26,309,113,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052320397607363935,0.054438891805954466,0.0,0.0,0.08898256993909814,0.06860388092625468,0.1501499776602672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05824217516733684,0.0,0.0,0.06146899842744315,0.050307833425503726,0.16388157926950894,0.0,0.07225683963753493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05635789688093125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05635050913126314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592758143294029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06167692478596898,0.22086414846820168,0.165404383106953,0.04673967661797,0.06281831853533243,0.0,0.0597973204368957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021889591962301,0.1814532438193198,0.06836378805714713,0.0,0.1115477095835692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207308072724927,0.0,0.057855165331900535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438530392562641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786770746121546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046211655400617856,0.19178028020741508,0.0,0.0,0.057899120137547576,0.054940573478570114,0.0,0.0,0.11124409440127264,0.11809734375152944,0.06190677458631939,0.08734347244122752,0.0,0.0657282674540154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662504065923853,0.052221659461865994,0.0,0.048094947705069724,0.0485118536993366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410266867903239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04433371451620927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06245562368039735,0.04535749948197139,0.11425327932530585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475138518588216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06260294748534423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04191296935146265,0.06726785918906415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242730912518128,0.10427060593803064,0.0,0.13650521450092307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000778314107089,0.055434441833842704,0.0,0.12941411639565306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15674561457220418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489604198345629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718438699994954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043465503366330815,0.12576521193313825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301249288968618,0.14411292291533473,0.16194758146079113,0.11576818816636456,0.10386273619848037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523559127170353,0.06306742406075899,0.0,0.0,0.06644232520666027,0.06667372653129368,0.4647608616490715,0.07153203355489347,0.0,0.04213159420939197
mentalhealth,thisaccount01,2020/02/24,"Hello I've found someone on Omegle that seems to be severely Schizophrenic/unaware of reality, and they've been talking to me about being abused at home+possibly drugged. It really has me concerned and I think they might be in danger. I'm trying to get them to post here or somewhere asap. What should I do? I'm being as kind and supportive as I can be for her. She says she's 34 and lives in upstate NY, her name is Ariel. She's too afraid to give me her last name, she says her parent(s) threaten to send her away to a ward if she talks about what goes on at home.  She mentioned her mother says she's satanic and calls her evil, and she feels alone and terrified. She's been used by a sociopath for sexual photos on the app Kik also. Is there anything I can realistically do here?",4.276363636363637,5.308544337579619,5.308847712796759,82.4220671685003,70.59235668789809,8.511638679791549,27.011580775911987,8.841846274778883,1.8742025477707007,619,20,127,11,11,204,97,157,0.14300000000000002,0.823,0.035,-0.9549,1,1,1,0,1,0,18.0,0,0,2,0,7,5,2,1,3,0,16,1,0,1,0,18,26,12,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,2,1,3,1,0,4,7,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,4,25,2,23,16,0,11,1,0,0,0,31,8,0,4,1,85,29,0,0.0,0.20332431497959594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17773142090365907,0.0,0.13723276092596062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121660656894822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122890404724824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17522828030028684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19900776047965732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676883663371733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881564424473783,0.0,0.0,0.0896567286514568,0.16461951799455296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3442683773277416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17870059662488333,0.0,0.13988128911464887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15153069509176814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820461903220457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905474671112492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435051857745522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993480106689474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40940245934364383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15622309351856914,0.0,0.1938652346323944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454006821648673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947357523734856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758598093795068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995779881454856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650878900485212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821195105170878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tortlefeeder,2020/02/24,Why do I feel guilty when I've done nothing wrong My father's put me and Mom through hell for years emotionally to the point where we've finally had enough and left. This has been going on since 2008 (basically my whole childhood) but for some reason I feel guilty even though for the reasons I left with mom was completely justified. I've felt the most free in years and wouldn't take back any of the decisions I made in the past year but for some reason I feel guilty like I've done something wrong even tho my actions were COMPLETELY justified. I don't mind going deeper into the situation privately and I'm sorry if this is the wrong sub Reddit for this but I've just been mentally exhausted for the past 6 months to the point where I don't even want to get out of bed 90% of my days thinking about life.,7.510812883435586,6.1582454417177965,7.1967407975460125,79.75560199386506,63.9079754601227,11.09478527607362,32.03144171779141,10.125756701596842,2.739736809815951,649,19,136,12,8,205,95,163,0.10400000000000001,0.754,0.141,0.8564,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,11,7,1,0,9,0,13,2,0,4,0,28,25,11,0,3,5,3,4,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,3,7,0,0,9,0,1,4,3,5,0,0,9,4,12,3,20,15,5,26,1,0,0,0,3,11,1,4,12,80,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694158026304017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700050371701552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372579854984611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296831156105615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23157052855672414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272714079702899,0.0,0.11690766361466046,0.0,0.2241909948447714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716265281264758,0.0,0.1086356732758688,0.12394336780036215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591129014309717,0.0,0.1286043181409073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458618723599863,0.0,0.07991672516377381,0.05527628550380316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705928293415856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11402221479997428,0.0,0.1142428601942225,0.2650250142281414,0.09031020357592154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856440964124353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160168844560225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21391469218075287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137406459389406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34899163221250884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359361885881294,0.12717823355006191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710353030098329,0.0,0.1266550832597778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506996424503117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07249789971882284,0.11116308824996088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673507218178057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020945701737621,0.1263208748442227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3711145478204944,0.0,0.21858245539708174
mentalhealth,Dwarvemrunes,2020/02/24,What do I do about panic attacks? So I am a third year college student and I recently learned that I may be experiencing regular panic attacks? What do I do about these? I am a very busy person and I can't really afford these attacks and they're ill affects when I have to study and write papers.,3.0174999999999983,4.763005750000001,5.020000000000003,80.44500000000002,74.83333333333334,7.466666666666668,28.66666666666667,8.238735603445708,2.1305666666666667,235,10,45,4,5,81,39,60,0.307,0.693,0.0,-0.9561,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,3,2,2,0,10,1,0,1,0,8,10,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,0,1,8,0,3,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,35,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7556783113822136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5195681567633177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933319919970665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14184481886351458,0.0,0.21862168000813573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18269146530009608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142584704484884
mentalhealth,MultipleVoices22,2020/02/24,"Advanced Schizo or Other Disorder? I've been helping a local schizophrenic for the past 5-6 months and things have been going really well in helping her situation and being a friend. The one thing I cannot seem to find any information about or see come up in here is how the 'others' take over her speech. We will be talking and all of a sudden her face/eyes will go blank and she'll start talking in a very fast/low voice to herself. The voices change but they 'take over' her speech, sometimes it seems they're talking to each other but she's gone during. When I've asked her what she was whispering she has no recollection of the voices, she completely steps out for a few seconds.

Is this just really advanced schizophrenia? She's been on anti psychotics since shortly after I met her plus whatever else the hospital is giving her. Could this be multiple personality disorder + schizo?",4.587500000000002,6.7229560833333375,5.034047619047623,80.34428571428573,71.5,8.133333333333335,26.880952380952376,8.841846274778883,2.1825309523809517,714,25,128,14,14,227,112,168,0.067,0.841,0.091,0.2325,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,1,2,6,2,0,0,11,0,17,1,0,1,1,22,30,11,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,3,1,6,0,1,9,9,0,0,5,0,0,7,2,0,1,2,6,7,18,2,18,17,3,23,0,0,1,0,27,10,0,4,6,91,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827448341681678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14884841438856422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843275142011774,0.13715320147344598,0.16693825190838002,0.0,0.0,0.12712353732585896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36495788525713496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330071711856623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14552342069792018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12301232210161507,0.0,0.0,0.1527375190860858,0.18097582691016725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134424831730144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12708720832118892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078910182179852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519926968865577,0.0,0.13902402241350845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20399973199697352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687705020461632,0.2898942727893221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317077281023341,0.1789689981986358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747181284125036,0.0,0.11269613548967315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23942597491313536,0.38392297049716106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21155625991303345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313724754205328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14315713936315852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,macinzie-,2020/02/24,help so i’m trying to get myself into therapy because i know i really need it but for so reason i am so hesitant in going. i know it would probably help but the idea of sitting down and talking about stuff just scares the hell out of me. has anyone else ever felt like this and if so how did you get through it??,1.4827272727272742,3.247074242424248,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727274,79.30303030303031,6.824242424242425,21.60606060606061,7.793537801064563,0.9361696969696977,244,7,52,4,6,84,50,66,0.17300000000000001,0.715,0.11199999999999999,-0.7673,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,8,3,1,1,2,0,4,0,0,2,1,17,12,10,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,7,1,10,9,0,7,1,0,0,0,4,4,1,1,2,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16172275448017162,0.2369830711456084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099172175909516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19321241010481285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092142816867836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22207385918355346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416780741069679,0.0,0.13144695649235094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100564896237683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26109730267750897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25422094102185955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11299619796150527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17149797731533012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24936882736385965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816975479033415,0.2378037718524597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23156079224926165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647707463147805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859014612097137,0.0,0.0,0.2644993050782624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15703015360225406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643011792584535,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soft_beanbuns,2020/02/24,"I feel so drained and I don’t know why Title says it all really. For the past week I’ve been feeling tired. Idk if it’s a “lack of sleep” tired, or a depressed tired or a “I’m overwhelmed” tired. I guess it’s a little close to a depressed one cause I’ve had moments where I just didn’t care about school or anything else. All I wanted to do was be alone and play video games all day. Really, that was the only productive thing I’ve did all week. I barely studied or did anything school related. I didn’t feel like talking to people. There were a few nights were I just couldn’t sleep properly. Idk what this is and I hate this feeling of being lazy. I just want to get this over with and have the energy I had a month ago",1.001568627450979,2.9347967385620954,2.424601307189544,95.84670588235296,81.61437908496733,5.648627450980393,19.35032679738562,6.742157984588678,-0.0023704575163399078,563,14,130,6,15,182,87,153,0.223,0.675,0.102,-0.9617,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,1,1,10,0,18,6,2,1,4,29,30,10,0,5,8,0,4,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,9,6,0,0,5,3,0,0,4,4,0,1,11,5,11,3,10,16,6,12,0,3,0,0,3,4,0,6,9,80,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379793205320952,0.0,0.0,0.13295923321778444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21128567623619715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088829476666214,0.13187792482840452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279215713389987,0.0,0.2211408089433384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724200858576992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596438587473364,0.0917121251998902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707137001270236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14142107694125428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674511630752192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055231163712307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271822407977536,0.12866687763328433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246881701512076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047255414165522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699117046786634,0.09763603641174896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254979907609395,0.08900003107092926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16448241711551034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10209006525134423,0.0,0.2598475392468533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569382220899873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031840868210498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528757524771928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5901991435431123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15143945266687364,0.0,0.2059516076979289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115839732556664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,munchsnackies,2020/02/24,"Am I depressed ? (Warning there’s sensitive topics in this post like self-harm, and suicide)


     Okay, to start off I’ve been feeling this way since I was about 9-10? I felt really empty(?), it felt like an impending dooming was awaiting me and tbh I didn’t think I’d make it past 5th grade. I just couldn’t see myself after 5th grade, I probably thought I’d die or something, who the hell knows. Anyways by the time I turned 11 I cut for the first time, it was small and I made the dumb mistake of putting it on my arms. It went away for the most part but throughout my day, I would think about committing suicide. It would happen every other day or so, it felt awful, I felt like a fraud and I still do. I keep thinking about it, but I’ve always stopped myself because “who would clean up my body? My family shouldn’t have to see me dead or my family would lose so much money from a funeral.” I’ve thought about telling my family but who’d believe me? They’d think since I’m a teenager, I’m probably making it up but am I? I really don’t know, I think I might cave soon. Just go somewhere discreet and off myself, but I’m a pussy so I’ll probably not do it. Anyways that’s about it, am I faking it though? I can’t tell.",1.3187352941176478,3.181488643137257,2.945122549019608,92.87180147058822,80.21568627450979,6.132352941176473,22.389705882352942,7.1686216300943375,0.6322058823529413,944,30,211,12,24,311,134,255,0.198,0.745,0.055999999999999994,-0.9908,0,0,1,0,0,2,36.0,0,0,1,2,16,12,3,0,10,2,22,2,2,3,1,45,50,17,5,7,11,0,5,3,0,6,0,0,1,0,19,5,0,2,14,0,1,3,6,8,0,1,13,7,32,4,20,28,3,24,2,3,2,0,6,8,2,5,14,130,51,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245825622110575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310671569237294,0.0,0.0,0.06040979364765828,0.0,0.0,0.1116505691475815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11007658140306238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12782123530875578,0.0,0.08535377128355172,0.0,0.10284905337968972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349513053636964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802649814250088,0.0,0.05010740134440155,0.0,0.3806020904047064,0.0,0.0,0.08429350721848472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056320210990000175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763286482129458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808369064903439,0.0,0.0,0.10892437085266927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14524420831219773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086636464788203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09376981256078054,0.13229862311436802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512831421484573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284912292008751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731449423576413,0.09460115092430783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949093904564462,0.0,0.3205362530918417,0.0,0.0,0.09962180539538834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12697063629029418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793804861816907,0.0,0.10338180645700568,0.0,0.0,0.16395133344342352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629120507680401,0.0,0.0,0.07014273935807565,0.0,0.07914054100635813,0.08285115068490817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167963105629131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323368197487632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174929945993157,0.0973642047956452,0.15734697682981835,0.11557077697908852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077911890770433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866012541003498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186570964221268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815881730142732,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garbagedinosaur,2020/02/24,"Can't access mental health services This is largely to vent but also advice would be appreciated.

I'm in Australia.

I need to see a psychiatrist, as my meds aren't helping my anxiety/depression and my GP has run out of options that he's comfortable prescribing.

However, minimum out of pocket cost in my area is $150-200, which I can't afford. I'm not eligible for government assistance either. No local psychiatrists bulk bill and some charge up to $550 for an initial consult. I can get most back from Medicare, but I don't \*have\* the $550.

I'm very frustrated, I'm having worsening mental health issues, including dissociation, but I can't get any more help.",4.146979241231212,6.3596712283464605,6.1017036506800295,71.8801431639227,72.93700787401575,9.657551896921976,31.23049391553329,10.018931242160765,3.677525984251969,534,25,92,16,11,185,91,127,0.11199999999999999,0.785,0.102,-0.0726,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,3,0,13,2,0,0,0,14,21,7,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,1,0,0,0,1,9,1,14,19,4,9,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,3,1,55,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209827327833564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808451745716164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15378388860143488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738887572382385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947752335048852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362990678769549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4807554100639894,0.0,0.0,0.3031555914123566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360328404122411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251192085877202,0.0,0.4557946306520342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16768096291788218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18020539594386928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865903164607305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16064434332041744,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shewantsherbrainback,2020/02/24,"Suggestions for treatment-resistant depression/anxiety? Throwaway for someone who will be reading replies. Cross posted to /r/askdocs for doctor perspectives, and here for more patient-centric ones.

She’s looking for other people's experiences/thoughts on what her next steps should be. 37 cis female, with treatment resistant depression, anxiety, PMDD, and historical prenatal and postpartum anxiety and depression. Medications aren't doing the trick. TMS proved unhelpful. Researching ketamine (trying to understand the science behind how it works) and ECT (terrified of memory loss). Looking into having a full blood work up from PCP to see if any infusions at a local integrative health center might be of benefit (suspecting magnesium could be helpful). Fully acknowledges that exercise and diet make a difference but sadly too depressed to make those things happen. What other alternative treatments are out there? What is she missing? What has worked for others?",8.333179824561403,12.10993315131579,7.614631578947371,58.51808771929825,66.17105263157895,11.684912280701756,40.396491228070175,11.072351349416056,6.5000170175438585,797,46,90,29,15,248,118,152,0.125,0.855,0.02,-0.9454,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,4,4,8,1,0,5,0,14,6,1,3,1,21,22,9,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,12,9,1,0,4,2,0,2,1,7,0,1,0,3,3,1,20,14,2,13,0,6,3,0,6,8,0,2,2,69,15,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117744936712238,0.0,0.3772185437936573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13123284978966604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42470449868374177,0.0,0.0,0.17172745163663974,0.0,0.16823553164872293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14534828148173545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17471333644993614,0.0,0.0,0.11017104275967826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760520307191335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21943111812316898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16558141922325692,0.0,0.17436631607742062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17480507022360905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113786328267538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395066566991832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741716110108664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644104464149803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13097839488668292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392667501549006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919744471893013,0.0,0.0,0.1304882176635355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115937020899986,0.0,0.0,0.17111076795989436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3589811439314451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DairyQueenEmployee,2020/02/24,"What's wrong with me? I've been diagnosed with mild depression for about 2 months, and ADHD since I was 8. But ever since September of 2019, shit has been going downhill for me. 

Static electricity seems to hurt more, and is happening more frequently. I get up from leather couch? Painful shock. I get out of my car? Painful shock when I touch the metal door.
Put my airpods in? Shock in my ears. Touch my computer? An arc forms between my PC and my hand. This might just be me worrying but it's alot more frequent
Ringing in my ears is getting progressively worse, my jaw pops and grinds. That might be tinnitus and the ringing comes in waves. Along with a rumbling ring??
I'm incredibly paranoid, if my parents walk downstairs, I won't notice them, even if they make noise, it's only until they come into close vacinity that I notice them, and it almost always scares me. I had my first sleep paralysis incident in October, and haven't had any since. I see running figures in the corners of my eye, and hear taps on the ceiling and floor. I usually am in my basement adjacent to the boiler, so it may be that. I get thoughts of creatures chasing me, not like ghosts. I mean orwellian monsters, like small eyes and skinny limbs. I sit at my computer with my back to the windows, and the curtains don't cover them clearly, so I look back every 5 minutes for safety. I can only sleep in the corner of my bed with pillows over my head, or on the couch with lights on.

Anybody know what this could be? Worsening depression or what?",2.6784693877551007,5.1594781394557865,3.563972789115649,86.96555102040818,78.82993197278911,6.64108843537415,26.806802721088435,7.793537801064563,1.738628027210885,1199,50,229,20,30,382,174,294,0.158,0.823,0.019,-0.9892,1,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,5,2,9,13,1,1,12,0,21,14,11,1,2,45,38,21,1,3,8,1,4,2,0,4,3,6,7,0,12,23,1,0,5,0,0,7,4,11,0,1,6,15,40,2,38,23,5,39,0,3,4,0,7,21,1,10,12,154,52,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14682813504402975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12233855403537268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165767520261516,0.0,0.0,0.08308179036603212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878869029423461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104823440067725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754515325681136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21045475264951571,0.12400296488341253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069407625875863,0.11051242099404142,0.10293597330395256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10392024245005442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553212797463204,0.0,0.0694336986803602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803712954091843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538468586553608,0.0,0.13769778541891128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078866175144502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671430540811973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11937505699102348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025945016301562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155138778493362,0.0,0.0,0.13308215057155404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592123702542189,0.0,0.0,0.09751727707901807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27818940951017895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858360561390424,0.2600012492348511,0.0,0.1356585944162528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281755157211735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12231642865125088,0.0,0.09735601736173466,0.11122165832681777,0.0,0.0,0.12540876976965565,0.3031881615262899,0.0,0.2445223486091599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699166946841717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455623566371158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407255349063545,0.1245046658999932,0.0,0.1335769335574636,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rexinator-G,2020/02/24,"I am broken. I married my wife young. I love her. She's the light of my life. But over the years I've fought an identity crisis. I still do on the daily. Most recently she found out I'd been cutting myself and asked me what was so horrible about my life that I felt the need to cut. I finally broke down into a panic attack and told her it's been so heavy on my mind that I feel the need to transition...but she assumed that life with her is so bad that I need to change it. That's not it at all and I wish she would see things my way. I'm dead inside, I cant look at myself in mirrors, I cant look down at my chest hair or hear my own voice or stand being called handsome anymore. I hate these stupid clothes and this stupid face. But more than anything I hate my stupid self for getting into this mess. I hope she never reads this but I know one day she will. I won't move on into the life I dreamed of because I love you. But I'm going to regret my life every day. I regret putting on these clothes to go to work to be called my name and be one of the guys. Regret that I didnt hide the cut marks better so you wouldn't hide the sharp object from me. Regret that I ruined your life by trapping you in this marriage. You brighten my life up with your smile and your compassion and your ambitions. But I've arrived in Hell and I dont see a way out. Only a way to slip deeper down every day.

Sorry all, just needed to say this somewhere that someone would see it. Love you all, take care of yourselves.",1.425413885180241,2.994654806853585,2.776398531375168,95.57632009345795,78.81308411214954,5.457988429016466,19.875500667556746,5.985473137389443,-0.20592843791722304,1167,27,271,7,28,378,159,321,0.188,0.691,0.122,-0.9439,0,0,0,0,0,1,30.0,0,9,0,2,7,27,11,1,13,0,18,13,3,0,4,49,49,19,1,13,9,1,4,0,0,5,7,3,0,2,21,15,0,0,5,2,0,4,8,20,0,2,8,13,55,7,40,33,6,37,1,6,5,3,33,20,1,5,9,178,76,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570209599770048,0.0,0.0,0.07941129950784206,0.0,0.09021449826949772,0.1097827113861763,0.0,0.0,0.08057349135266474,0.05882552049833359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534643148375311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19707463289561786,0.0,0.0983882084478516,0.0,0.102084232633145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867036016121785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130973124109789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16261086874507627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048793312920339386,0.0,0.09265515870404964,0.10571106219128007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580729822468564,0.0,0.0,0.05041728097578933,0.0,0.10968637785410328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555019798783147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19054759549343425,0.0,0.0,0.10876254331964666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584630027261387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053033890893038726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4771257581335879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620714362828806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612851246966306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097437517740791,0.0,0.0,0.1025642563700164,0.0,0.2862141877300653,0.07442676950610276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078183084855985,0.07339261864192258,0.0,0.11322198905324594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970091801595582,0.0,0.0,0.09652614081834593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528213435897373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674069433260276,0.0,0.0,0.23069408175709916,0.0,0.10067057355570168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176415933349407,0.0,0.0,0.10802387913875136,0.0,0.0,0.0770650458495515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255601038210767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411032970093926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092209910777404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297916880844472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11097026810024932,0.0,0.0,0.07025316863138273,0.0,0.0,0.13710170026695284,0.0,0.0,0.06214285321454718
mentalhealth,Greakazoid,2020/02/24,Help me identify a mental disorder I’m a mom with a 14 year old daughter who feels as if someone is watching and controlling her life for entertainment. What does this sound like? Thank you,3.0874999999999986,5.901087194444448,3.9811111111111153,82.55000000000003,79.83333333333334,8.044444444444443,28.44444444444445,8.841846274778883,2.758411111111111,153,7,28,4,4,49,34,36,0.067,0.672,0.261,0.7783,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,5,4,3,0,1,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,3,3,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,1,3,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35035172116510394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580053354376307,0.0,0.27335881230366743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15794465163273902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093763441531285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206375573766748,0.15260916396938742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31479747084967863,0.0,0.0,0.3658462709976136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.327781831480049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646717529317265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875901376057388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20115730445400173
mentalhealth,Axelmiki,2020/02/24,"People who prioritize mental health over family, what did you experience after putting your foot down? I’ve posted about my JNMom before, but I want to know what others experienced after finally putting their own mental health and happiness over their family’s expectations/ happiness. Considering finally quitting the family restaurant.",12.869935897435901,14.492195865384614,12.27384615384616,37.93782051282054,51.884615384615394,16.164102564102564,42.33333333333333,14.554592549557764,7.907364102564102,283,13,29,12,3,93,40,52,0.0,0.8029999999999999,0.19699999999999998,0.9052,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,2,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,3,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,6,2,7,2,1,10,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,4,22,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442136902645057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16578245825059865,0.4793076382497346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.371310746744176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3608259529326315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602953643213435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314093162081444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415888600913068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174950276734236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623135204266439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34074533335885004,0.0,0.18026120807948454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999627891576907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pussyslaperreddead,2020/02/24,"Why do I feel like every time I start to feel happy or when I notice a lot of good has happened in my favor recently etc I start to feel like something extremely horrible, embarrassing and or life changing will happen? I’ve always felt that if I say to myself that I am happy or when I feel good I usually then go straight back to saying that I feel like shit, that today is horrible etc because if I try to convince myself that I’m happy I get a feeling that something extremely horrible and even life changing will happen to me?",10.615566037735851,6.5466285754717015,10.775188679245286,65.00919811320755,60.41509433962264,13.618867924528306,42.5377358490566,11.20814326018867,4.7208943396226415,423,17,77,8,4,144,58,106,0.14300000000000002,0.593,0.263,0.9001,0,0,2,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,12,1,1,2,0,6,3,1,0,0,15,21,10,0,2,5,0,7,3,0,2,2,2,0,0,6,2,0,0,7,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,9,15,10,8,18,3,13,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,6,13,52,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208166449282237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433526662167194,0.0,0.07478611081327315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25956362712359193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736468252014343,0.08103063150703366,0.0,0.1033652940627732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721917367932768,0.2629331987887795,0.11779443526485685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409654058337012,0.0,0.06972328964888543,0.20580051388724868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3254631779228386,0.391793394526314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733085500373031,0.17980941171851214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430027086110216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396748347356655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211341641914966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19512408973612505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12593181906400966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188893958162798,0.0,0.0,0.1736706041068533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153714995572769,0.0,0.11628866124163455,0.0,0.0,0.08329336163714099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511743680015606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070187052357484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thelostpatient,2020/02/24,"Someone pls help me find out what’s going on (new to Reddit so Idk if it posted the first time) So idek where to start off, it all started when I was around 12-13, it didn’t help that I had no friends and all I had was a phone, I got obsessed w a celebrity to the point where I convinced myself I did have a relationship w them, not even that I had this whole other world in my head, it wasn’t just fantasization either it was like those emotions were real that world was real and it felt so real to me, it was all I thought about all day and right before I went to bed, not only that I would go bizerk if I found out who his next girl (slept around a lot) was, I had this whole account “exposing” him and his girls and how he cheats on one of them but I y’all stemmed from jealousy, not even jealousy it felt like I was being cheated on almost, I harassed a lot of people and did a lot of fucked up shit and I didn’t even expose him Bc I hated him, I was hurt. This continued for years and I ended up convincing myself at one point I did have a relationship w him (I guess to validate my feelings idek at all). It stopped but not really, you see it’s continued but it’s continued to person to person, Ik that sounds weird but let me explain, it only “stops” when I find someone else to get obsessed with and I’ll do it all over again, it’s never stopped for a long period of time, around 14-15 I started having real relationships so it would transfer boyfriend to boyfriend, after we broke up I would do the same thing (even continue imagining and convincing myself we were together and those emotions in my head were real). On top of all this my paranoia has all’s been bad and has been progressively worse, I don’t just feel like people are talking behind my back I’ve convinced myself they ARE and can’t think otherwise, and I obsess over it too almost all day everyday. I’ve been told all the advice in the book and none of it works, “don’t think ab it” “don’t care ab shitty people you’re better” “replace a negative though w a positive” “you just don’t need to care and feed into them” over and over and over again for a couple years and it doesn’t work, it just goes straight through my head, doctors tell me nothings wrong and its just anxiety but I haven’t told them ab the other world in my head stuff Bc I’m scared of judgment (always Have been ab every little thing) and it’s like I feel fucking crazy and when someone tells you everything’s not that bad it makes
Me feel like it’s just me. I’m so frustrated idk what it’s is or if it’s just me I’m going insane, someone please help. EDIT: also I have huge outbursts when it comes to this stuff (or anything that makes me mad most of the time) like I almost black out but not really (irl how to explain) and go crazy, a couple minutes afterwards (sometimes seconds) I’m completely normal and making a joke, it’s even been pointed out by people EDIT: yes I’ve told the doctors to an extent about obsessing over ex’s but not about the obsessive lurking and caring and believing I’m with them in my head and I’m on meds and I’ve been through so many and they don’t fucking work",1.7983735579842133,3.7809994490740735,3.2301113134992927,90.82492714025507,79.20061728395059,6.101032179720705,22.197024893746203,7.135373973100315,0.6488425622343659,2465,75,525,30,61,806,255,648,0.179,0.7020000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.9928,0,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,2,4,7,7,38,38,10,6,23,1,52,13,7,5,11,122,98,55,0,8,27,1,6,6,1,3,2,1,1,4,51,42,1,3,15,2,1,6,22,22,0,4,37,9,69,16,66,56,20,84,0,2,2,3,42,43,4,13,40,367,120,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645063647092504,0.0,0.0,0.1735401994709928,0.0,0.0,0.046197388722093786,0.04806795745768025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044192687121378485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0475384917104481,0.1542784380052402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442035310903735,0.09646844402470099,0.0,0.0,0.04915667495793753,0.06508523286644596,0.0,0.05109147754478014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17669627851545774,0.0,0.0,0.04976238310164546,0.06056909468053617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783932731313852,0.0,0.07451171031963666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825686199962145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04825810653124648,0.12996340575483198,0.0511656781067776,0.0,0.0,0.19077749992619508,0.0,0.04867238972146015,0.0,0.051918535596157736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168378060132257,0.08253954894109634,0.11093349488753153,0.0,0.10559858804949383,0.049137792922422936,0.0,0.06334009644386203,0.044631741970884514,0.16021793455228148,0.03018161783757496,0.0,0.13132450914876262,0.0,0.04620268683932011,0.0,0.06363843317366058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05703436000260835,0.2964353519799037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616287301771575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06184229391912813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05907212864744299,0.0,0.16933640719746829,0.05789913831112072,0.0,0.051123238392305835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733794773483042,0.0,0.0,0.1156826171023867,0.058568115990250476,0.0,0.0,0.0641676973835274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042834555268405794,0.04455457078689283,0.055793104988673216,0.06143737551657801,0.0,0.05660079124995108,0.055430361955422086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829075988181664,0.08787098094453348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16019740910653013,0.1008823212196351,0.0,0.06341238328330122,0.1638295025185293,0.0,0.055326182627023816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3287655746980529,0.07401586479358863,0.0,0.0,0.18606500814772944,0.0,0.049333919437637534,0.0,0.0,0.057836271359395175,0.0,0.046033955542125714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0592984582629207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957879966592522,0.0,0.05713444960914065,0.0,0.12266636596298088,0.0,0.0,0.1448909703752386,0.0,0.0,0.13226205164652655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04643207190731729,0.10098429965675547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675754951576448,0.0740313484999708,0.056757184404538,0.045861676774183464,0.1010556998007431,0.0,0.0,0.16560061752974695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05355190887205825,0.0,0.12899276730337933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261683045856425,0.0,0.0588709605234963,0.1231110953105341,0.0631607042633055,0.0,0.07440194357004852
mentalhealth,ArthurKM,2020/02/24,"I struggle with Sexual Arousal A bit of an odd query indeed and I’m not even sure if this is the right place to put it, but the point is I struggle deeply with sexual arousal.

I don’t mean that I can’t achieve it, it’s the exact opposite. When I am aroused it’s almost like I’m a different person. All of my reasoning and morals just disappear from me, and the only thing I want to do is just fuck. Obviously that’s the whole point of being sexually aroused, but for me it can get so strong that I am unable to resist temptations, and it has led me to do some very regrettable things before. I don’t want these things to happen again.

If anyone has any advice or suggestions, then please do let me know",2.6071149425287388,4.215679406896555,4.0149137931034495,87.79938218390807,75.6206896551724,7.8678160919540225,23.117816091954023,8.59863814320734,1.338229885057472,554,16,120,11,12,183,88,145,0.132,0.7709999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.6367,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,6,6,1,2,8,0,16,5,4,2,4,26,25,12,0,4,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,14,6,0,0,3,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,0,0,13,3,12,23,4,10,1,0,0,5,2,4,1,5,4,83,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16859286170580962,0.0,0.0,0.17276237954010715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732530201344335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063594460902755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14680905338187755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18835644675602028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802555705287424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395345268853815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15949982599207482,0.0901390248233722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15256639025482668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481715624416988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642208907344412,0.0,0.08428871448628568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18793412418793812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121570512287975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15064523886017664,0.1802555705287424,0.189384492960035,0.3261904132904265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734388037049533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738804128845376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733840355261602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607285140137896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16260607744083205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34386082441390914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235408813387826,0.2035235687088544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926219183571939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,averageghosthuman,2020/02/24,"Is Neuropathological testing worth it? 24F depression and hypersomnia, I struggle with cognitive impairments like memory loss, inability to concentrate, racing thoughts, brain fog, trouble retaining things. 
From what I understand these are all common symptoms of my disorders. 

My psychologist however recommended I get neuropathological testing done- a full set of tests including memory, personality.. she says she wants to rule everything out, get a better understanding of what’s going on. 

The test is $2400. I’m scheduled to do it this Friday. I don’t know what to do because I’m supposed to trust my therapist but also I’m convinced this is a waste of money. The tests won’t change anything and I already know what’s causing the symptoms. 

Any advice? Is this testing common and/or helpful? 
Thank you for reading.",5.514973021582737,9.008290510791367,6.21970773381295,65.943806205036,75.54676258992805,9.5181654676259,34.586780575539564,9.673873057562805,4.672226258992807,667,36,93,21,16,217,93,139,0.092,0.769,0.139,0.7711,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,2,1,9,0,1,6,0,10,3,1,1,1,14,23,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,11,4,0,1,5,1,2,1,2,4,0,0,2,1,11,5,14,20,2,8,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,58,22,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17408979119579546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965971028763994,0.14246949652308344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115066511620967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466053637835865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10860087778270602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575625221203054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19887851377265772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18301298496807844,0.18846305443311065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344357137722758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20417964206809566,0.0,0.0,0.18231314888547898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601131109616781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861559718640536,0.0,0.1012488866638981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941270918338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958172933932449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703692764101079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15555699044703475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782019697071174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416750195420894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18624498999433667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3703399384356186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16402004536293835,0.0,0.20685024513157466,0.11835744114933798,0.0,0.0,0.14143418449531306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3709286916183737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507970272719627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Defalt_-_,2020/02/24,"I'm so sad Girls are constantly ignoring, ghosting or outright forgetting about my existence, I fear I'll be alone for life cuz my ex straight up replaced me in less than a day after ending a 1mo long relationship with me, I feel lacking, I hate myself, I'm constantly sad, I'm constantly listening to suicideboys, no one shows interest for me, people seem to get tired of me, I don't feel like getting out of home, my school grades are like shit, and now I have 6 final exams, with a lot of stuff to study, I'm thinking about ditching my friendships. I hate my body, I'm addicted to masturbating and games, and always eating the most sugary thing I have in home (straight up ignoring salty stuff until it's what's left). I feel constantly tired, can't focus, can't study, avoid people all the time.",8.794395604395604,6.6924964615384654,8.683479853479856,72.4996153846154,61.948717948717956,12.504029304029306,37.67032967032967,11.20814326018867,4.025786813186814,632,24,122,14,7,206,96,156,0.24600000000000002,0.6970000000000001,0.057,-0.9837,0,2,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,0,0,4,12,3,2,5,0,8,7,2,1,1,21,23,7,1,1,1,1,3,2,0,0,4,1,2,1,5,6,1,3,5,2,0,0,4,9,0,1,0,4,18,3,21,22,5,20,0,2,0,0,5,8,1,4,14,71,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13877209503186969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184089773531926,0.0,0.0,0.10592097737963063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14139783719846036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5502496516137029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209578272836299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302562120826467,0.0,0.0,0.11274701318717108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432440772751179,0.19309497317482532,0.09094072391168234,0.0,0.13944721449455494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301444993035136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25135809696164835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553777587440457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830813967488356,0.0,0.08991336054031769,0.12438138769194515,0.0,0.0,0.11265349442177483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082230260003738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625947767571521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650288303998907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666892015336013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12883096577619388,0.0,0.11588605319056927,0.0,0.0,0.13066814128400692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914483269435632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457021159192325,0.08156652793862429,0.0,0.0,0.07422767722206035,0.29261745515591764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shallowaffect,2020/02/24,"Trichotillomania has taken over my social life I’m 20 years old almost 21 in less then 2 weeks. I have trichotillomania, (irresistible urge to pull my hair). I’ve had it since 7th grade. I have an intake with a therapist in about 3 weeks but I’m at a loss. My social life has been completely ruined in terms of self esteem and anxiety I’m a mess. I can’t stand going into public areas where my hair is exposed. Hats are my safe haven and when I can’t where them I get really bad social anxiety, I don’t like when people look at me. If someone looks at my hair I freak out. Depending on the situation I sometimes almost have panic attacks. I won’t go swimming. I won’t go get my hair done. I have a hard time finding a job because I specifically look for a job where I can wear a hat to hide when I go through really bad relapses. At times I’m doing great others not so much and when I relapse it’s the worst getting on my feet is so difficult due to me getting depressed and having anxiety being around people I quit my job because I’m embarrassed about what others say and I don’t like when people tell me things about my hair “ why do I look bald” “ your hair is kinda messy today” I spend hours crying in the bathroom before work because I can’t figure out a way to style my hair where I won’t look bald. This eventually leads me to quitting my job (usually at this stage it’s so badly noticeable) going to job interviews is hard because I can’t cover my head and look professional or atleast I haven’t figured out a way to do so. It’s been years I feel so defeated I’ve tried so many things to try to stop the pulling but I can’t stop. I don’t want to do this to myself. It’s cost me so many opportunities it’s made me so depressed. I cut my hair 2 years ago hoping that maybe if I went cold turkey and cut my hair short enough to where I can’t grab it .... boy did I fuck up with that one. If anything it made my pulling worse. It went good for 297 days the longest I’ve EVER gone without pulling since 7th grade. After that total catastrophe damage I didn’t do to my hair in 7 years of having trich was now happening in days. I get anxiety I pull, I get stressed I pull sometimes I don’t even know I’m doing it. Sometimes I’m so stressed out I tell myself what’s the point it’s not like I can stop anyway. So here I am again I tried everything but I think I have to go cold turkey again. Going cold turkey for me is buzzing all my hair off but it breaks my heart because I hate having short hair! Everytime I cut my hair I can’t even look myself in the mirror. I can see everything all the damage I’ve done. My favorite pulling areas. I look like I have alopecia which some people actually confuse it with that. I’m depressed back at square one and what scares me the most is that my hair will only grow back so many times before I cause permanent hair damage so fuck my life!",1.9660921806064025,3.7041651160862337,3.66076848462092,89.08101098282175,77.77280265339967,6.607328139178323,22.32263212240684,7.498158380483773,0.7790356331549799,2267,66,491,31,53,757,238,603,0.245,0.695,0.06,-0.9990000000000001,5,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,1,7,36,38,7,6,19,0,53,26,21,5,4,55,98,34,0,5,11,0,19,4,0,4,3,1,0,2,29,17,0,4,6,1,2,20,19,29,0,2,14,33,85,9,52,79,10,93,0,9,10,2,12,34,2,12,38,300,114,11,0.0,0.0,0.057393629984299976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052134744441501686,0.0,0.1177867323910034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799690985998394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839861558105235,0.05235661001433466,0.0,0.06690900764444058,0.0,0.09044811969187473,0.14732080163034356,0.1792612493813306,0.0,0.10009215391278706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060417810625852476,0.0,0.0,0.06166498397531934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460402334315189,0.07585986627451698,0.0,0.1519683093334744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12037354951493714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06077021338813333,0.0,0.07769171084923447,0.053200305742306664,0.0,0.0,0.10571581703326766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0297379442169221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053754602691634144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874452742866213,0.18436620095971326,0.0,0.2339760341662831,0.04933009196702393,0.0,0.06484224721476968,0.0,0.0,0.05200870880756425,0.0,0.1053709409397784,0.05806629460376647,0.060359763757317865,0.0,0.0,0.0696944481720943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058415216354723624,0.05791958962031023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918173197126998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03232243917436686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462544262686767,0.11493349748025428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39510916909498706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130177899258756,0.0,0.1788834034775837,0.059086207823119075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04323479357389009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695972048703577,0.061715023073651024,0.0,0.07970729097060791,0.04473042448809704,0.0,0.0690051360130308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630958943260601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055597901321205706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511109417215596,0.0,0.0,0.07535504931168706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046770968205348436,0.05888271511040773,0.0,0.04686685752524468,0.0,0.061355454702832386,0.0,0.0,0.09730250377023926,0.06610899706829768,0.0,0.17985930232837624,0.04983260745530177,0.0,0.1745045854574341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751251299829507,0.13474165490343687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281142970581293,0.0,0.0,0.06828717066414973,0.07814633990881531,0.037685406584003184,0.0,0.0,0.10288412170753516,0.0,0.0557484550977825,0.0,0.0,0.11979180553612792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477491681436685,0.0,0.034689809474994206,0.09336706190216636,0.09435351100780487,0.0,0.0,0.10904166951349256,0.0530701634383808,0.0,0.0,0.05669425148821775,0.0,0.04281703136724722,0.0,0.059936125121903834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15149622698435358
mentalhealth,stadarcad90,2020/02/24,"Do 72 hour holds count over weekends? I don’t know where else to post or ask this at.

On Wednesday, a very close friend of mine was taken to the hospital (long story) and stayed there until about 3pm Thursday. She was getting transferred upstate to a mental hospital as a family member admitted her there. She arrived around Thursday at 6pm and has been there since. I haven’t once been able to text, call or speak to her since around then. Does this 72 hour hold count over weekends? Or will tomorrow be the last day she has to spend in this hold? I’m in California if this helps, i’m not sure how this works but it’s worrying me to death that I can’t at least check up on her (i have no ability to do so.) Thanks in advance",2.287279297883323,4.071683107382555,3.2142281879194634,92.43241094475997,76.98657718120805,6.732266391326795,22.870934434692828,7.61054688173877,0.7948591636551359,569,17,126,8,13,181,96,149,0.08800000000000001,0.8320000000000001,0.081,-0.4646,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,9,3,0,0,5,0,14,0,0,1,1,18,22,12,1,1,6,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,3,2,2,2,1,5,0,0,0,5,1,12,3,25,15,1,31,0,0,0,0,12,15,0,4,13,80,19,2,0.1934516861431092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3444260296131065,0.1808512124857527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975358007472712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476033370361207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692908741917427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16160406059438126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823690329365565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14946029283651027,0.0,0.10107052158587744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12966658743519408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810218859525497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106315987505592,0.15768894385923776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17119865466710413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19495379931008264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20601973216237585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18527324033992554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200504677042899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20619375786268546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823259247832146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781043215468562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596179009675998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408351315106455,0.19645957764663646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,peterpeter14,2020/02/24,"Do I have canabis-induced psychosis? Please give me your thoughts and encouragement please Hello everybody, I want to share my experience with my first time smoking weed and how it has impacted me since. Even typing this is fairly difficult, so bare with me. Im 19 and on January 15th I smoked weed for the first time and I’ve haven’t been the same since. I thought smoking weed would relieve my anxiety that has been built up over the years but it did the exact opposite. 5 minutes into taking 3 big hits, it immediately hit me. My consciousness shifted totally. My whole body was extremely tight and I couldn’t feel anything. I felt as I was in a whole other universe and I felt like I was dying. My cousins rushed me to the emergency room and on the way there I shouted random things that came to my mind, even if they were inappropriate. I couldn’t even walk and they had to push me in a wheel chair. 

It felt like I was in literal hell and I didn’t even want to fall asleep because I thought I would never wake up again. I was extremely restless and they had to restrain me because of how I was acting. I can’t even recall what happened after that. The next morning I went home and still could barely walk. I went to sleep again and woke up with hospital equipment attached to me. I thought that was all a dream but it wasn’t, to this day I’m still hoping this is all a dream. When I got up to use the bathroom even touching the toilet felt extremely weird, as my senses changed. My mind felt completely empty, my sex drive was depleted, and I felt like a stranger in my own home. I was alarmed because this didn’t feel like normal  anxiety. As of this moment I have improved a little bit, but in some ways it has gotten worse. I’ve developed eye floaters and have been seeing flashes of lights. My body feels lethargic and slow. I don’t feel as sharp as I used to. My ears sometimes ring and I get sweaty hands and feet. The worst of all is my memory, as they feel scattered and my connections to them is off. The thing is I don’t have any delusions but it has still been the worst times of my life. I was able to handle normal anxiety and depression, but this is getting very hard.

I keep on hoping for the best and that over time I will return to normal, but it feels as i’ve fallen too hard. For the first time in my life I don’t like being alone and feel as I need constant attention. I have been having suicidal thoughts and really need some help. I hope I didn’t trigger schizophrenia but as I look up the symptoms everyday they match up to what I’m feeling. I’m seeing a neuro psychologist soon but I’m just wondering if anybody else has experienced something like this. Off of 3 hits of a joint my entire life has been fucked. Please if anybody has comments or know if I will recover words of encouragement please let me know because I really need them, thanks.",3.8161494984875017,5.335694868651494,4.453623228785227,86.24625557236112,72.29246935201402,7.712800509473013,27.33804330520617,8.296473431620573,1.7315775831873903,2274,82,462,36,44,725,247,571,0.122,0.7509999999999999,0.127,-0.5278,0,1,2,0,1,0,49.0,0,1,7,4,20,24,2,2,23,0,58,15,9,5,6,102,114,48,2,20,14,1,20,6,0,4,4,3,3,0,25,27,0,3,24,2,0,11,12,9,0,3,41,29,75,15,59,61,14,61,1,1,4,2,16,23,2,12,31,311,100,1,0.0635940185864853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586422430307404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04324611337062833,0.0,0.14594775046253375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05233245873512665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550652938879249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673799906735839,0.0,0.0694281975900324,0.1412772368086513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273461562308131,0.0,0.0,0.06727403939855639,0.0,0.06667711856109414,0.06872254190299018,0.0,0.05077464914891972,0.0,0.0,0.041012880986389014,0.0,0.05477343502331153,0.0,0.0660005510920773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053124642322775896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520194970413997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062207152913019585,0.0,0.0,0.25724037267030203,0.04543157958487084,0.3663613843012945,0.0,0.0,0.16227911916793486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058791645442842336,0.06645049993023289,0.06100517737791824,0.0,0.0,0.05086194608776972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056235980613557335,0.0,0.11393549903049767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04262573015414154,0.0,0.12757997156316486,0.18948962874366992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686924528617833,0.0,0.0,0.05652528568832086,0.0,0.0,0.06989921897573483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06502919263126246,0.13475500807859342,0.1864129513404072,0.06373791337179037,0.0,0.0,0.05340295904979478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842366031095012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14146247695498573,0.049047627580786166,0.0,0.0676329602251382,0.0,0.1869259077783851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792285419303739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147991344882909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135239853617307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521125867439186,0.0,0.06363994542616079,0.0,0.0,0.04895778243051962,0.0628961104768787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235879617272954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956153460672992,0.0,0.0,0.06609853502618289,0.04781478760377297,0.0,0.0,0.05854882818858066,0.0,0.0,0.08449808035790796,0.0,0.0,0.25243273618430595,0.18541091823665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984962747535207,0.0,0.05247172543825815,0.075018799653032,0.10095594379207852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790458470176125,0.0,0.1420009013569577,0.0,0.0,0.06896500041783178,0.0,0.0,0.06480773792863148,0.09035073240461801,0.0,0.0,0.04095246295789645
mentalhealth,vialalune,2020/02/24,"i started antidepressants i started antidepressants almost a month ago. the first week or two were incredibly difficult, but now i feel much better than before i started medication and the first week. i’ve been able to be a lot more optimistic and happier in general. i’ve only had one panic attack, as well (a huge improvement). i’m in high school, and my grades have always been very important to me even if the class doesn’t matter in the long run. overall, i’ve been more productive in everyday life and i have the motivation to leave bed, exercise and socialize- but i cannot seem to do any of my school work. i know i have to do it, but i just don’t. it doesn’t make sense to me because i used to always do my homework, i would stay up all night if i had to. 

i guess that the amount i used to work may not have been the healthiest for me or my sleep. i’ve never come close to failing a class and i never want to. is this lack of motivation normal? if any of you have any advice or strategies, it would really help me out. thanks!",2.958470588235293,4.53945910476191,4.567647058823528,84.31676470588238,74.61904761904762,8.369747899159664,24.257703081232492,9.007467420416297,1.7303165266106446,812,25,171,18,17,273,114,210,0.095,0.743,0.162,0.9427,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,8,4,7,1,1,11,0,24,4,1,5,3,42,38,16,0,8,11,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,2,0,5,9,0,0,5,1,0,2,7,4,1,4,7,1,24,3,23,27,7,27,0,1,0,0,3,9,0,11,15,119,29,11,0.12908765954862148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12614296690648516,0.11442842148616587,0.0,0.1292626443641558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21482254748250626,0.0,0.0,0.2633521052925784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685584843616065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869063911250178,0.0,0.10984409052049704,0.0,0.0,0.11416754467337226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119758849861268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526118167715196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527059931797059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21960379453519194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14220461046422794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08652473714436072,0.13638819971742988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07094320175397557,0.0,0.0,0.1366851926753674,0.0,0.0,0.09117843151482566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423851654878095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974571192984812,0.0,0.0,0.08616701513080884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004223628466946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303653828360007,0.0,0.09489428278471042,0.0,0.1991207220913581,0.0,0.0,0.1211400238485042,0.1264784984523746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747313892503346,0.09817698199944704,0.0,0.15145655499029528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269686018528194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612872062488709,0.0,0.11751655705963485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918088511253376,0.13158861251752696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27410672951715503,0.13759026941920166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884657343834548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609988620845458,0.0,0.0,0.2229805825809954,0.0,0.1065108382809774,0.07613924614770952,0.0,0.2070926680846256,0.0,0.11606530873889262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18795470715600293,0.0,0.0,0.1834003392749036,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TrippyDrugBoy,2020/02/24,"I think i have paranoia/schizophrenia. I cant tell family it would destroy them. I have put myself in therapy and nothing has worked. For awhile i have thought i have had paranoia/schizophrenia. I'm not happy, Haven't felt good happiness in 4-5 years. I've had girlfriends and friends that would do so much for me No emotion Ever. My Grandpa died in a boat crash and he was my best friend i didn't cry/feel bad. I don't show emotion, but i fake it pretty damn good. I don't lie(except for this one thing). I always have crazy thoughts(sober). Many times i will be left alone at my house. Every time i have made myself believe there is a homeless man,Robber,Friend,Family, Or some crazy shit. I have many times believed in crazy thoughts such as, I am being controlled by someone else, We are in a dream, My parents are Fake and many people are fake. I am scared to look at people some times. When i smoke weed i feel fine and don't feel anything bad but still not happy. I dont communicate well and stutter a lot.",2.113768472906404,4.340160512315272,2.726135467980299,93.59580418719216,79.3448275862069,5.2422660098522185,22.95788177339901,6.2581,0.3811933004926109,796,26,166,6,20,247,120,203,0.284,0.618,0.098,-0.9903,1,1,1,0,0,0,33.0,1,0,1,3,7,20,3,1,4,0,30,1,1,2,1,26,39,12,1,2,5,2,3,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,6,2,0,1,10,10,1,1,8,4,28,10,13,26,5,17,0,0,1,0,9,8,2,4,8,105,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113832867867987,0.0,0.0,0.08928853337768805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830502539140213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17919475550373914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417978751149005,0.11261272343503988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035461674741275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113683645083624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576372765647265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08964174438975991,0.24141325128771865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706588283578747,0.0904112952592716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20232014189468828,0.0,0.16277386579988046,0.0,0.10303214017039868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24871679556054946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800090755246158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34269286025190354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238185823438203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659003958682924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901113719639323,0.0,0.0,0.09122909841206824,0.0,0.10153706156727807,0.0,0.3263792423924741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888344529071714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296455238297716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271441825905185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11915240941093475,0.0,0.0,0.14878718034379593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109170424028802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787379340572227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743364434115896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014972655153377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092139545377707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569600135887688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937915868222936,0.0,0.12271561171579272,0.0,0.07129041241207164,0.06875838792770188,0.0,0.17038052265955553,0.25028773710937224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648243459330733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812122302831821,0.0,0.0,0.15245650427974802,0.0,0.0,0.06910258697457604
mentalhealth,Ryanjl1985,2020/02/24,"Was I abused? Was it really “that bad”? As a child my step dad would snap me with a towel, flick me in the forehead, pick on me, make fun of me, and constantly yell at me. 

One time that I can remember he had me in a corner and was kicking me (but not hard enough to leave marks). He always wanted to make sure I felt small and insignificant. He used to tell me that if I ever thought I could beat him up that we could go to the back yard and I could try. He laughed at and mocked me so much. 

My sister recalls a time when he was hitting my head into a wall but I don’t remember that happening. 

Now (34yo) I have severe anxiety and suffer from an inferiority complex. I have trouble looking people in the eyes and I apologize a lot. I can’t access my emotions because when I did as a child I was told “stop crying or I’ll give you something to cry about” and if I kept crying he WOULD give me something to cry about. 

I don’t know who I am. I can’t find my strength.. and I really need some validation.

Was this abuse? For some reason I don’t see his actions as truly abusive and I’m wondering if someone can shed some light.",0.9837398673544584,2.8917533135593234,3.111739130434785,91.02869196757557,81.54237288135593,6.138246131171703,21.701547531319083,7.255503002510835,0.6064648489314663,866,27,195,12,23,294,134,236,0.23199999999999998,0.718,0.049,-0.9938,1,0,2,0,2,0,25.0,1,1,0,2,8,9,1,0,11,0,23,3,3,5,2,48,42,22,0,10,7,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,2,8,13,0,2,9,1,0,3,6,5,0,1,12,7,38,4,23,24,6,23,0,2,3,0,20,11,0,9,9,133,46,0,0.0,0.3905540124695634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142533753861733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405456671146684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448758781052433,0.0917415730068046,0.0669791725896543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873653683581785,0.0,0.26318028257046105,0.0,0.4827729411036539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359531034020782,0.0,0.1135309115852289,0.0,0.0,0.099388810254143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549784878378003,0.0,0.100424347805149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108054588881154,0.06244486041761532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716266888156906,0.0,0.09842699500724776,0.0,0.1127641095921426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060384780298312235,0.0,0.0,0.11634244192075828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226786784616496,0.0,0.0,0.09341234311002007,0.0,0.0,0.14668569077779628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077124059599608,0.08147139759742042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445457979623665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617393672942692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14077830180165665,0.11297046151824296,0.0,0.0,0.2489353707414704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755666240617613,0.0,0.0,0.12412820255762845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930972763734616,0.16917527716501465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186095806488546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355649389177643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603615558605956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722898789402894,0.12813874291230726,0.0,0.0,0.10499088620238092,0.0,0.07459834966677265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489727808336854,0.0,0.0,0.06480750145239828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11915544864526875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15610500964076338,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CobaltNeural9,2020/02/24,"Daytime Depression Does anyone else feel sad and depressed and fatigued during the day but as soon as the sun goes down you change into a different person? 

The difference is like night and day. 

(Obligatory pun so others don’t feel the need)",4.836818181818182,7.434240863636365,4.790909090909089,80.30636363636366,72.18181818181819,8.036363636363637,26.90909090909091,8.841846274778883,2.4085181818181813,194,7,32,4,4,60,36,44,0.17,0.763,0.067,-0.4588,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,5,7,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,1,1,4,5,0,6,0,4,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,19,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717571894514433,0.25168719379270577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25985453422508353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168349390411539,0.0,0.4231387195755609,0.0,0.0,0.5132830066084028,0.0,0.0,0.21496120686959794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20520068826066834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484059149031961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000728928313302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18213893694161634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305164865185913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21448336078208172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eggs_and_cannabis,2020/02/24,"I'm always sad and when I'm happy I know its only temporary Every couple of months I have a drastic elevated mood. My self-confidence goes through the roof, I feel like a queen who rules the world. I feel like I'm the prettiest, smartest and best person out there and that I can accomplish anything. In the last couple of years though, when these periods occur, I get incredibly anxious because I know that I'm going to crash HARD once this euphoria wears off.  I always get depressed for months after getting a week of bliss. I do everything in my power to try to extend this happiness but nothing makes it last. Its always accompanied by sadness no matter what I do. The worst part is whenever I'm in this happy stage, something deep down tells me ""this is going to be forever this time. You are going to be happy forever. You have finally reached self-love"". And then I syke myself up so much for this happiness lasting forever but it never ever does. I just feel so powerless and I feel like a slave to my emotions and mood and it just sucks that I can only be happy once every couple of months :( My last post was about how I was so thrilled to finally be content with my height (I'm a freakishly tall girl), but now I'm back to hating myself again. I was so excited to be happy forever. I actually thought it was going to last this time because this period lasted two weeks instead of my usual couple of days to one week. I feel like a fool. You know when you think things are going well with someone you like and you convince yourself that it's going to lead to a relationship but then it turns out it was just a fantasy and you made it up in your head? Well, that's how I feel every time this happiness wears off. I feel like I convinced myself that this time it was going to be different and that I truly love myself, but nope. It was all a fantasy. I don't love myself and I doubt I ever will. But I want to so bad. That's all I want in life is to love myself, something just won't let me.",2.8456021018829354,4.6096142382134015,4.492696686615094,83.96356991680048,75.35235732009927,7.619588381258211,24.756166982922203,8.405096225971981,1.6411790103634505,1570,52,312,29,34,528,172,403,0.113,0.6409999999999999,0.247,0.9962,3,0,2,0,0,0,39.0,0,8,0,5,25,35,2,1,14,0,28,7,3,5,5,51,67,30,0,2,10,0,8,6,0,2,1,0,0,2,34,15,0,0,12,2,0,8,5,9,2,2,9,8,49,24,42,49,6,61,0,3,0,3,16,16,1,1,41,221,83,2,0.0,0.0,0.059792609790002574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15294957677853813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921989227712964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05042161537100586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047114367295247817,0.05115954045912486,0.07470165548098831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643011584194153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27118510323517525,0.0,0.03951535548557178,0.0,0.0527734629720434,0.0,0.0,0.06401617363355122,0.0,0.0,0.05361951892531885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06892272579018201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084801999207002,0.1548728467451853,0.0,0.055067301007364386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168666638621712,0.21886355876377075,0.0,0.13424090907221184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960362353406195,0.0,0.24375593101436266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.521801260677175,0.05488765527238,0.06049339092411631,0.06288272413411224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102042649381224,0.2996690288218626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265474655674287,0.04327820853367096,0.17960635444692136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16590105112582632,0.05797702499438856,0.040899519629801526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14672011953945954,0.0,0.04504195225536495,0.0,0.04725672503284789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05879211329243043,0.0,0.0,0.13050530904764435,0.04151947653186834,0.09320019723058412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635157887869486,0.0,0.0,0.053500325896464564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058681615675928375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578317161014709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784006735723746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0519155462585013,0.09434032089427202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053554407519036215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04070637812909623,0.039260608037360416,0.06019940512664389,0.04864310463743727,0.14291272729577792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04159964956866535,0.06664631497736867,0.05985381718827115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748242490187135,0.0,0.07227959765553282,0.0,0.1474460493494573,0.0,0.11018172942161084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0394571435332241
mentalhealth,Unimportant5,2020/02/24,"I Want Your Sympathy I am going to add a disclaimer for your benefit. This is going to be lengthy. And you are most likely going to get frustrated or angry along the way, so please be ready if you do decide to read. This post includes mentions molestation, anxiety, depression, self-harm, suicide, and pathological lying. All except the last are fairly brief, but better for you to be aware.

​

Dear Reddit,

I am sick. No, I do not mean cancerous sick, or flu sick. I mean mentally sick. It's debatable whether or not I chose to be this way or not. Ironically, I am not making this for your sympathy. I believe for awareness, probably. I'm not entirely sure but I am tired of keeping this inside of me. I am fully prepared for any backlash I will receive. Maybe now, we'll see.

I am a liar. A pathological liar. I lie for sympathy. Sympathy from others. Not for money or things of the like. But because I want it. I want it deeply. Every choice I have made for the past five years of my life has been based on this craving of sympathy. I lie to my friends and to people I care about. Sometimes strangers, but I mostly do it around people I am close to. Not because I have to and that makes it worse.

If you asked me, I would tell you that I have depression. To be quite frank, I have never been fully sure if this is 100% true or not. Maybe to some extent. But that truth is, I *want* to be depressed so someone can ask me what's wrong and I can reply with the cliche ""I'm fine."" I want people to be worried about me.

If I take my medication, I want people to ask me why and then I can be embarrassed and say for ""personal reasons.""

If I cut myself, I want people to see the marks and tell me to stop.

I don't necessarily make it obvious or say ""here, look at me!"" but when I do it, I have a sick sense of wanting someone to see the marks.

I had an incident when I was younger that led to me almost being molested. And even though I knew that it had not gone that far, I recently told a friend that I had been. I almost felt satisfaction when I told him. Excitement.

I told the same friend that before I knew him, I had a suicide attempt by overdose. Not true.

I told another friend that when I was younger, I didn't eat for five days because I was anorexic. Not true.

When I get anxious, sometimes I play it up to make it seem like I get anxiety attacks regularly. Not true.

I am not fully sure what caused this. Maybe I am a psychopath. But I do not believe so. I have feelings. I still cry, or get scared, or become happy or angry. 

Yes, I've had unfortunate things happen to me. But no more than anyone else. But I am so self-entitled that I believe my problems need to be bigger to gain sympathetic looks.

I personally believe that this began partially because of fanfictions online. This began when I was fairly young. The fact that someone as young as I was at the time, had access to thousands of romanticized mental disorder stories is absolutely ludicrous.

I have read thousands of stories where the protagonist is an abused, self-harming, suicidal, anorexic person and someone else (98% of the time, a celebrity or fictional character) swoops in to save the day. These types of stories, I feel have aided me in who I am today.

Not to say it is all their faults, as it was I who clicked the stories and decided to read them. But think about it. At the time, I was going through some things. And imagine the impression that a romanticized mental health story such as those can have on someone who is suffering from one, who has no idea what they truly are or how to get help.

It confuses them. It lies, telling them they need someone else to save them. That having a mental disorder looks like how they portray them when it is really not. They are lying.

It is almost like an addiction. Reading those stories. I've wasted countless hours of my life in bed reading them. And the sad part is, I have no plans to stop.

This is the harsh truth. We are all liars. Just some people are more comfortable with it than others. I just fall towards the more comfortable side.

I've said what I needed to say. Thank you, if you've stuck around to the end.

\-Unimportant5",2.236052482311848,4.554691876376992,3.663173567782192,86.54538996029495,79.4406364749082,6.776063528077143,24.773696151894196,7.892043584104881,1.4841999402931605,3241,121,644,57,82,1064,317,817,0.20800000000000002,0.63,0.162,-0.9946,0,0,0,0,1,3,136.0,2,9,11,5,27,53,8,3,33,1,81,16,0,10,15,135,140,61,3,19,48,0,3,5,4,3,15,5,1,3,59,21,1,3,14,6,1,9,23,19,0,5,30,15,110,34,83,97,14,58,0,5,7,0,53,17,0,28,34,469,169,6,0.0,0.060566017136995276,0.0,0.055725747595698635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15356072801267773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05538591648591229,0.062113499558640914,0.03476173234676758,0.05360127828045847,0.07820967393009927,0.0577483569743811,0.0,0.0357426262360526,0.05237603924973882,0.0,0.09101103309765957,0.14336421411397035,0.0581536687305816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464329906848652,0.05645539168901089,0.04349732693770003,0.2303681976236678,0.0,0.04520937806304188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05211781717564895,0.052511873486959015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05615030179681015,0.06593326800955819,0.0,0.13208258543436527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717043503511568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05230608355103656,0.1281066287933518,0.0,0.045275036004856016,0.0,0.0,0.03376270381895221,0.0,0.043068796869704516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05169320597039507,0.0,0.04908092847607739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579733758613917,0.0,0.13353422497687986,0.0,0.11620527861708685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04520313975022279,0.054415653650951364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05433563632994569,0.0,0.0,0.03426306105256089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050340555724422205,0.0,0.0,0.057705567350993324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0454356865571301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04166768029939265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221176899866086,0.12486742767939545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877777152629594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04836872502320805,0.1364856246933429,0.0,0.15406355036162908,0.11136414075621524,0.0,0.05149562111699032,0.20605813911863805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370919552645442,0.03942505740562582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034638620102908906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05535539765881251,0.048797549349593815,0.21263111523842135,0.13390179397038246,0.0,0.0561117929545214,0.0,0.0,0.048956546715207806,0.0,0.055113436696268815,0.04891265572782892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054369877697720455,0.2556572499492112,0.0,0.032747254287013784,0.05255742373524884,0.05047247975105342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0486245594282272,0.16260312247798775,0.051177651993952133,0.0,0.12220236719620077,0.04653555852476174,0.15998046809617505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598707451770899,0.0,0.10111326025126292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04082259483715228,0.08547323314178845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677431282834208,0.0,0.14453324674949386,0.0,0.03843408619533356,0.0,0.13403715064647428,0.047062233714871095,0.0,0.0,0.10188081971820137,0.03275410483009149,0.05022279900379782,0.0,0.0894212803634963,0.058752180848640735,0.048453523735193516,0.1953802939394648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412039585768297,0.08114956983161045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04612569835849077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05191242120589673,0.05209321865683796,0.03631248836475636,0.05588908943306715,0.062113499558640914,0.032918069285971234
mentalhealth,Ahjani,2020/02/24,"Anyone how to deal with lack of motivation? It's completely gone from me. I sometimes don't have enough to get out of bed, or even get ready for it. I don't have enough to watch a movie or play a game. Get a job or go back to school. Just so burnt out over the past 2 years. Physically nothing has happened to me in that time. Not minor event or life changing events, just a few birthdays and 2 holidays.",1.4264285714285734,3.3608028333333344,2.6930952380952395,94.45607142857143,80.19047619047619,6.104761904761905,21.214285714285715,7.1686216300943375,0.3498857142857146,314,9,73,4,8,101,61,84,0.028999999999999998,0.848,0.12300000000000001,0.765,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,5,0,5,1,0,2,0,14,11,7,0,1,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,1,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,14,10,4,12,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,4,6,47,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16168292779440402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17780328554070893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24461300297441274,0.0,0.2424425580316823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383902406082916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4778493412678757,0.0,0.15272668459368288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3624278358131578,0.0,0.13141458568189726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044778671843556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22946227472438044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633261383174469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22187352833941373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207372954614088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340193271554764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286945543437944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134833352953334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14890595291865902
mentalhealth,barrel_of_hearts,2020/02/24,"Trying to find myself Alternative account

This time two years ago I was motivated, actively tried to better myself, found time for the important things/people and seized every opportunity I could. 

Fast forward to today. I don't know how to be happy anymore. I'm good at hiding the cracks but they're there and they're getting worse. I have someone I can talk to and do talk to regularly but it is very short term relief. 

I hate my place of work. I work in a creative role that my managers have erected a box around. There is no scope to be creative in a role that desperately needs it, my concepts and ideas are constantly thrown out and I get things thrown back at me when other companies are doing things better than we are. We can blow every company similar to us out of the water but I've been put in this little beige box and the key has been thrown away. 6 months ago I was taken out of the communal office and put on my own. I hate it, I'm isolated. I've been trying to get out for a year and my job rejection rate is a solid 100%. The worst part is I'm not missing out by much. No matter how much preparation work I do, I simply can not land a job

My second job brings me some joy but I can't live off it. It's an On-Call based job. I live the job, I love my colleagues, they are closer to a second family than colleagues. But the calls are few and far between. Being On-Call isolates me from doing anything more than 4 minutes from my house, booking off-call and missing a call makes me feel worse and I'm now stuck in a loop with nowhere to go.

I moved out this week. I had to move back in with my parents for a while and now I'm finally back out of their box room and in my own space. I though this would help, their house is crowded at the best of times, but it hasn't. All its achieved is cementing a constant reminder that I'm very much alone every time I walk through in door. I'd love a dog but it's against my contract. My friends have moved away or work odd shifts and don't normally make time for me unless I instigate it. They're busy with families and lives, I get forgotten about quite easily.

My last relationship was 4 years ago to someone who one day never spoke to me again and moved on. I've only had one serious relationship and that was as a teenager. I don't know how to meet people, I've been ghosted by all but one person who I've met on dating apps. After my first and only date I was told there was no connection and we ended it there amicably.im.actively looking but every time I get rejected I feel more and more like that person isn't out there. I just miss having that person to relax with, to be myself with.

I'm crap with money but I'm working on that. I've cut down my spending massively and focussed on building up my savings. It's going to take a while but I have a plan.

I am not sure why I've come here, wether it be to just get it all out anonymously or wether I'm looking for answers I'm not quite sure. Sleep seems to be the only relief from this never ending circle of crappiness. I just exist, I'm not a whole person anymore and I'm definately not me. I lost myself at some point over the last two years and I'm desperate to find myself again.",2.460568525130462,4.052497075528701,3.934393298544357,88.29301538039,75.97885196374622,6.868926119198022,23.063553968689927,7.62072044053348,0.90402078549849,2512,73,538,34,55,832,277,662,0.11599999999999999,0.759,0.124,0.7406,6,2,0,0,0,0,59.0,4,0,3,16,23,29,4,0,28,0,51,5,2,6,7,97,99,45,1,4,23,1,2,1,1,1,0,1,2,4,30,43,1,0,11,2,3,12,17,12,0,8,19,5,65,17,85,72,19,95,0,6,2,2,31,42,1,5,44,355,95,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158741928372808,0.0,0.0,0.06293183885380096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052055483053377,0.0,0.0,0.05000253012603185,0.05409169122109311,0.0,0.0,0.11417712587327287,0.14016831190641973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376671170385433,0.10747935212908202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240910340154636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05234169134643147,0.0,0.131325798745062,0.0,0.048514076828639785,0.0,0.0,0.03918691891502453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763544525291292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047808035792925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456334387937556,0.0,0.061446900236338135,0.043408889659925516,0.0,0.0665625749060097,0.11107202585164797,0.051684727102735584,0.0,0.0666231713852185,0.04694511630847442,0.0,0.19047603752780026,0.0,0.06906569275476337,0.050964875339671915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468303094027625,0.0,0.11998118584071872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040727961339716866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022401027274364,0.0,0.06859369956911725,0.06563414994577417,0.0,0.30148805177693205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678718881355115,0.09905943136522567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029685589149870795,0.0609001948422526,0.16096374917447046,0.0,0.1020507399517332,0.0,0.06632967194495511,0.0,0.1096814298896852,0.0,0.08111915682913133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04850021261308424,0.2583245634200634,0.13400274215803518,0.045054776943478425,0.09372789029965746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05953455121948885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352314741361707,0.1386383290821993,0.0,0.0,0.0674697947795352,0.06580008984994827,0.0,0.08425041988870051,0.21222260633313966,0.06348409560288698,0.0,0.0574403978787793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221666055962462,0.0,0.1292572355704562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130472813931851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531608590403424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608065885934516,0.0,0.10296808805902903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453626354607667,0.0,0.04568599327099218,0.09767752365813648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073608446476765,0.0,0.05969905062076075,0.0,0.2125873367826401,0.0,0.057595940959061474,0.05806136998312856,0.0,0.12376166742085447,0.0,0.11871267015516987,0.0,0.07309005439696964,0.0,0.0,0.1002711928851254,0.0,0.0,0.04874017799913749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054828891575980296,0.06783939183865456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22117987003808,0.0,0.12384477804025845,0.043164083325770965,0.0,0.0,0.1565167631929316
mentalhealth,yunoletme,2020/02/24,"Unemployed and can’t handle the stress Hi, I just graduated in December as a electrical engineer. I feel as if I am not good enough and will never get a job. Now I can’t even go to job websites and apply. I get anxious when I am applying or looking for jobs or even when I am trying to up-skill to become a better candidate. I also wake up in the middle of the night at 3am everyday. I started taking antidepressants but it seems to me that they are making my condition worse.",2.7179591836734684,4.2833376836734685,5.322193877551023,78.72369897959184,75.22448979591837,8.981632653061224,26.535714285714285,9.516144504307137,2.531363265306123,375,14,74,10,8,134,68,98,0.105,0.873,0.022000000000000002,-0.7433,5,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,7,3,0,1,6,0,7,1,1,1,1,13,16,12,0,1,6,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,2,12,2,12,15,1,13,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,4,7,56,14,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15898861805274295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22459918123562586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195704850150725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758316570224792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054243053679792,0.0,0.2626248098245179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052452004431878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20774047379423294,0.0,0.11298854114686782,0.1667527446603178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5918659835546933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669506779733193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270749663993478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333484929102614,0.0,0.0,0.1865701078705346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18098953616361396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071903589851825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277366601124643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494806907639107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13497922238024368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026047990152299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cracked0_0,2020/02/24,"Just gave up on my dream Like it says I gave up on my dream, my dream was being a D1 football player. I was gonna be to but then I decided to cut people out of my life and they play football so im giving up on football. Football was more than a sport for me, my counselor suggested I play football because I have a lot of anger. So I did and it helped but now it's all over. I feel like this is a new low, im moving to a alternative school that doesn't have a football program. I don't know what to do im devastated...",0.04350313479623935,1.6181655603448313,2.7641065830721026,94.02791536050155,83.05172413793103,5.597492163009405,21.75235109717868,6.574015621080383,0.24638965517241385,399,13,98,4,11,140,67,116,0.091,0.74,0.16899999999999998,0.7066,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,4,7,2,0,6,0,12,1,0,0,1,11,18,7,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,3,6,0,1,2,3,0,0,6,2,15,4,16,9,3,13,0,1,0,0,7,9,0,1,5,67,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13739066281628354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395981788750455,0.1610128140334877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21620677445038047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510686800913249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7303531093923253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238639515604025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15919384162659328,0.2202203411655228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19161155981628405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395452015479399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21767516186217653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625137265726904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792326658569351,0.0,0.22809842985659584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QueenOfLux,2020/02/24,"Can someone help me figure out what is wrong with me. I'm a 21 year old female living in the US, I'm currently gong to college but I'm really dealing with something right now and I can't tell what it is. 

I've been generally depressed and had anxiety for most of my life but I think that stuff is pretty livable for me. But over the past couple of years I've dealt with these random spurts of anger and lashing out. It usually happens with my significant others  or close friends. Usually things go really well and I think I'm a very nice and helpful friend/SO to them. But for some reason little things will set me off for no reason and everything they say or do will upset me even if it's just the littlest thing. For example, me and my friends play video games together online and if the game doesn't go well I'm usually fine and just laugh it off, but I will randomly just choose a time and completely freak out for no reason and overreact and escalate things. I even blocked 2 of my best friends for no reason just to make a statement, like it's a cry for attention and I'm aware of this I just don't know why I do it or how to stop it.

 Idk if this is even the right place to put this or if anyone can even help I just wanted to know if anyone knew anything about this. (Also sorry if this isn't a lot of information you can ask questions if you need/want to)",3.5315140845070445,4.413470390845074,4.698,86.67200000000004,72.20422535211267,8.215211267605634,25.819718309859155,8.548686976883017,1.5384301408450711,1077,33,234,18,20,355,144,284,0.138,0.6829999999999999,0.179,0.9529,1,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,1,2,2,1,16,16,1,1,11,0,18,1,0,6,0,69,35,31,0,8,22,0,0,1,3,3,1,1,0,0,22,21,0,2,15,4,0,3,7,5,2,0,3,1,23,11,33,29,4,27,0,1,0,0,19,12,0,17,12,158,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783038426152332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490590513488718,0.0,0.0,0.13693107952360886,0.0,0.08057699095187701,0.0,0.09153877163377218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275739525663427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026636567218708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834281809934718,0.10755675016485282,0.0,0.1009476802519778,0.08433539499099009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586918740124216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800109600546839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.302600384619613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129648212118033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658729611775375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968942309971384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762476809006792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916136644516004,0.04783708828935816,0.09813812293904337,0.08646212187077039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324516305515778,0.0,0.0,0.06536006827424437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260389314226888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027469648893691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347244192994704,0.0,0.0,0.1023019712020294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996163494681226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843319376978343,0.10968896340482598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254557192115872,0.4026981521457541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16724042505847847,0.0,0.07786718352680087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829643887914486,0.07538095643268641,0.0,0.10960957931547584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186263375823759,0.0,0.0,0.11209104196775116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558339470765806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26020566283387897,0.12548196384880994,0.0,0.0,0.0570959371763888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778157299185844,0.0,0.3235237923687529,0.08079142176879926,0.11550745535305115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17607750464441707,0.0,0.08835447104943953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705639394150174,0.0,0.1261101166263601
mentalhealth,johnmicrosoft,2020/02/25,"I think I smell. m/18. Recently I've been affected with a very strange anxiety of sorts. For the past two months (give or take) I've been affected by what I believe to be olfactory reference syndrome, or ORS, which is the false belief that I have foul body odor. In my case, I think I smell like shit. 

It sounds silly maybe but it's so fucking crippling. This has affected my ability to operate normally in any social situation. I'm constantly stressing about ""what if I smell bad? what if everyone around me hates me because I smell dirty?"" and as such has caused me to attempt to isolate myself from my friends and struggle to focus in school. I can't think straight and always worry about my smell above all else.

I already struggle with anxiety and depression and am taking Welbutrin to treat it. I've had to ask my friends and even my girlfriend if I smell and of course they tell me I don't. I know I don't, I have good hygiene but it's impossible to convince myself of that when I'm out. I shower at least once a day and I wash very thoroughly.  I wear deodorant and wear pretty nice cologne, as well as dress decent enough. I brush my teeth, brush my hair etc etc.

Is there anyone else that struggles with this? What can I do to treat it? Any help at all is appreciated. 

tl;dr I think I smell bad even though I know I don't. Has affected my mental state and ability to operate normally in any social situation.",2.093763440860215,4.579321512544805,3.4742759856630836,86.71808064516131,81.1863799283154,7.160860215053764,25.429032258064517,8.238735603445708,1.822755698924732,1118,45,223,24,30,365,146,279,0.184,0.67,0.146,-0.8347,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,1,1,11,20,3,4,4,0,19,8,6,5,2,41,33,24,0,5,8,0,1,1,3,0,1,1,1,0,15,15,0,0,8,0,0,0,4,10,1,1,3,12,40,10,32,29,6,16,1,1,0,1,10,9,2,7,7,143,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699812235564908,0.0,0.08821895479908412,0.0,0.0,0.2162961732398368,0.0,0.16221336931336722,0.0,0.0,0.0741331799316848,0.10863226211098607,0.0,0.09438222653029156,0.09911643509802064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17704819911363426,0.06463014256491997,0.0,0.0,0.11945070104940456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776675137533295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089139936178492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457232161373562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837554113338129,0.0,0.09131675633067418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771358694622126,0.0,0.0,0.10954926311544244,0.2364855336489503,0.14005331229219656,0.0,0.0,0.10130874540431807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638249609836391,0.09801580563458412,0.0,0.1017061448703736,0.0,0.08892638223744889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467496214072784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106443866896779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165340450931191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05179708632840285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651353955213437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684543017897992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462590002788442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077584698400373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11291017146701401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012101763946438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786268223328613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468412137015903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073001158759892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088302537872063,0.0,0.23834676596831386,0.0,0.21615254070484816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144805968798128,0.33251223657935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15943098353274307,0.0,0.0926680666084039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717389517865048,0.10416626273158183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356827336757286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749588195100847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532668097804696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767067972370606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gEnErAlCoNfUsE,2020/02/25,"Recovered Memories? I can’t remember things about my youth to the same extent it seems other people around me can. I did experience some trauma, but there’s one situation I feel like I should be able to remember more than a single flashback memory from but I just can’t and it’s been plaguing me recently. I was wondering if anyone has found success with recovering memories and how so? I know trance/hypnosis therapy is the most popular subject for this but that kinda freaks me out so I wanted to hear stories from people who have also experienced lapse in memory. Thanks y’all!",4.329174311926604,6.838252605504589,5.982100917431192,71.58801376146789,73.40366972477067,10.231559633027524,28.33119266055045,10.355215969177356,3.7086726605504574,470,19,78,16,10,160,84,109,0.027999999999999997,0.815,0.157,0.9508,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,8,6,0,0,3,0,11,0,0,1,0,24,19,10,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,3,13,4,12,13,6,5,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,6,3,64,20,1,0.21147954763564636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16912011783877026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14787141685124428,0.0,0.0,0.1882616336635018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206867577331284,0.0,0.0,0.10693041353401278,0.15108103108651738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318764084036201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383528200507337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162236287125818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033182247302132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143304014611625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29322658114445643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088105402074748,0.0,0.4791302039943699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925230375511568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377118721881697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194701954289606,0.2418452933466921,0.0,0.1404976144562158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247361164416486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22934054829733136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cghost2,2020/02/25,"I Have a Strong Urge to Find Balance and Equality in My Life Had to admit this now since it is slowly getting out of my hand. I am mostly feeling fine but I am worried if I will get triggered in the near future.

Just as the title says I consider myself having this weird behavior. I am an adult (21+), but ironically considering myself that I am doing the ""right"" thing. Basically I am trying to balancing out my gain and loss. I am strongly against taking responsibility of something that I am not in fault. But on the counterpart, I also share my gains if I do not really deserve it either. (I don't gambol or doing anything similar, because I would consider that as my own responsibility.)

I am not sure how to describe the ""balance"" mentioned above so here are some few examples that I actually did in my life:

* When I was a kid, there are usually people giving out fliers with somewhat promotion info. Although I tried my best not to take them but if I accidental get one, I would trash them on the ground. It was not my responsibility to dispose trash that does not belong to me.
* Similar age, similar situation. I usually trash fliers hanging on my door or my parents' car to the ground.
* I lost money in my middle school and I stole the same amount back (from different people).
* I once got kicked out a Uber due to driver refuse to go to a location. Well he dropped me off at somewhere sketchy and something bad happened... I broke my laptop, Uber did not reimburse it. So I did not pay any tips to any driver regardless my experience until I saved an equivalent amount of money matching the repair cost.
* Similar situation when a chain restaurant abruptly invalidated all my reward points. I was a hoarder in their rewards. So I did not pay tips at that restaurant until I saved the same amount that matches the points value.
* Currently, when there are things in my mind, such as stress, business loss, or getting yelled at by my family, I would go on Google Maps, Yelp or similar websites and search for places I visited and hated. I would write a detailed but honest review that will absolutely roast that place, and those reviews will look legit.
* On the counterpart, I am talented on some special activities that will let me gain some prizes or rewards every once a while if I attend those events. Personally, I had fun attending, but I will always ended up getting something. Regardless if I need them. I always give my winnings to other people, since I did not consider my talent is a valid life skill nor something I should be proud of.

I can swear that I never crossed the legal boarder after I became an adult, but I am not sure about what will be going on in the future. I have a secret diary that records my ""unjustified gain and losses"" in detail, and waiting to get them balanced someday. I also do not dump the negativeness to my friends, of course, I do not want them to know. I am a coward that only let strangers suffer.

Recently due to work, family and personal finance I may be facing a drastic change in my life, but nothing will be life threatening nor getting me anywhere near bankruptcy. I already feel the pressure, and starting to dump them out whenever I am hidden. I am just like an a--hole, admitting my behavior is neither ethical nor acceptable, but I cannot help doing them. What happened to me?",5.147319072093347,6.709153744408948,6.211001527989997,74.77137519099874,69.06389776357828,9.021753021252954,31.659813863036533,9.43228470229965,3.0853898874843733,2628,113,457,56,46,875,294,626,0.10800000000000001,0.722,0.17,0.9928,3,0,4,0,0,0,87.0,0,0,8,20,19,38,3,2,32,0,60,7,2,2,4,90,89,49,0,14,35,1,3,1,1,13,5,2,1,5,26,17,0,2,9,0,7,9,21,14,1,1,12,6,91,24,65,58,17,71,0,6,1,0,28,38,0,16,24,357,117,10,0.0,0.0,0.08200634508305557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927350596406553,0.1344060218969616,0.13984822781789424,0.0,0.0,0.11429379162438777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06915390387343766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461796995236582,0.07016597776742327,0.0512271479633068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818987839972937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889822045802198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779901804466092,0.0,0.0,0.07353987035555581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744303459808275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07080337719988264,0.0,0.0,0.08220266306539291,0.15844203183489267,0.0,0.08498156036412674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680675537230466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06492547581774187,0.0,0.30733488516591634,0.1612286628276787,0.1432776181228307,0.0,0.06721071808171529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14862430283513933,0.0,0.0,0.08296747555910705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056327100175708265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04618361134474831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718636060633279,0.2967831405965888,0.04105541006269562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056849966439283,0.0,0.09173447315719054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485171225346368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06231112117597443,0.06481321544835393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080634151072417,0.0,0.0,0.17898973546261526,0.05694450421378865,0.06391264374262222,0.0,0.0,0.0933112722653104,0.0,0.0,0.1747785189147884,0.14675279112018227,0.17559803608932187,0.0,0.15888107035180335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053835174559400636,0.0,0.08297473534815719,0.0,0.0,0.07176569974643282,0.0,0.06682825532320626,0.0,0.08504822508998698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390297617315777,0.18891842973377154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587779639548507,0.0,0.0,0.059480628399516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626216926944567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15840457951475828,0.0,0.12636819693169546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116586582743261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410892516126807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851060538411065,0.0,0.0495662059962058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555784031279432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117871008847148,0.08534194143198293,0.0,0.23878510639935904,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mammoth_Monster,2020/02/25,"I'm so exhausted and don't know what to do Hey friends,   


I am so remarkably tired fighting this voice in my head that tells me I'm not good enough. I grew up in a household where there was no foundation for confidence. I was abused and treated so poorly. I've been through therapy but the more I go the worse I feel.   


In a way, I surprise myself because I commit to things that I'm terrified by but I figure it out. I have managed businesses, I was a firefighter when I was younger, and now I make videos for huge brands! On paper, I'm successful! But I certainly don't feel so. When I look at my work objectively I know its quality and what I've accomplished is wonderful but I always feel like I've gotten opportunities because I've gotten lucky and nothing is based on merit.   


Every time I go to therapy I feel worse leaving. I don't feel like I'm making any progress in my self-confidence or lack thereof. I want to believe in myself. I want to feel confident and secure in my thought but I'm not and I'm exhausted. I don't feel worthy of anything including my wife and any of my success. I'm just so damn tired and putting one foot in front of the other without feeling like I'm getting better seems like its all for not.    


I used to say that I have to keep going or else I let my abusers win but I'm just kinda over it now. I don't know what to do. Can anyone help me? I'm really tired.",1.6497136311569314,3.5387856323024067,3.6573195876288658,88.03782359679268,79.27491408934708,7.197709049255441,25.55441008018328,8.167268648758528,1.5992437571592215,1093,43,235,21,27,371,142,291,0.166,0.583,0.251,0.9838,0,0,0,0,5,0,25.0,0,0,0,8,13,21,2,0,6,0,19,7,2,3,3,51,57,24,0,3,14,1,8,4,1,0,5,2,0,0,13,10,0,2,15,1,1,6,10,4,0,1,8,11,37,17,30,48,4,27,0,0,1,0,7,15,1,6,9,144,50,6,0.0,0.2519502357093206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846907703113394,0.0,0.0,0.1446062837287456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434336555988334,0.0,0.08749459530870027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962676953339816,0.0,0.0,0.11978937289191773,0.0,0.09403386583511672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881904640629491,0.0,0.0,0.10985986196885496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958153462934841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4300799704016209,0.22787106316553601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214472233258963,0.0,0.055549268465328414,0.0,0.1812770720420126,0.08917851019865634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091178547045632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126592366796522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450457929064723,0.0,0.0,0.17529667125799742,0.0,0.0,0.11258048078772727,0.0,0.108722254410431,0.0,0.2077757747555332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892843639164354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14194257331896107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201958271298124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204707286458421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068837685807062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06811310060048885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455214857271896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679227307169988,0.11091785611543904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929308031564918,0.0,0.2431787486055871,0.0,0.07063613600400903,0.0,0.0,0.08440841737209959,0.0619976727599896,0.3666072125834862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182875153462014,0.0,0.0,0.12542387028685084,0.08439408026673549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249137358038936,0.1153025282561842,0.0774042560271879,0.0,0.21670400894547967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadtrips,2020/02/25,"I wish I knew what was wrong inside my head? I'm not really in a position where I can seek professional help. I just want to know if anyone else has experienced this or know someone who has and can maybe attach a name to what I'm going through. 

Im not really sure if this is depression. For a long, long time Ive had feelings of depression starting in 6th grade (im 19 now). Low self esteem, social withdrawal, self-harmed, etc. I remember for the longest time I wanted to seek out a therapist for counseling or meds but I wasnt able to do that. I just felt generally depressed for a while. Then for a period of a couple months, I felt pretty okay. I felt happier than I usually have in my life and I didnt want to seek help anymore because I didnt feel like I needed it. I felt pretty great.

However, the past few days I can feel the low mood coming back. It doesn't exactly feel like the deep depression ive experienced in the past though. I dont feel particularly 'sad', rather I feel more irritable and inadequate. I feel like people dont want to be around me. I feel like Im not good at anything. When somethings not going my Im getting angrier than usual. Like last night someone wasnt replying to me when I wanted to. Im not dumb, I know that nobody is obliged to reply to me just cause i want them to, they may be busy or just not feel like talking. However it made me so mad and i just started punching my walls and my bed and was crying hot tears. And today something made me angry and I slung applesauce all over the kitchen. I have never acted like that before Im usually very emotionally intelligent. Other than that Im not very reactive to anything like if someone tells me something I normally think is funny i barely feel like laughing. I just feel like, ""ehhh. whatever."" 

Does anyone know what these symptoms might be indicative of. Thank you in advance to anyone who may be able to help me make sense of this.",2.2502723653886427,4.40365273385013,4.131049654305471,84.07446260213705,78.50904392764858,7.594636496962079,24.412947831552486,8.524219190627866,1.7649068929394511,1516,54,304,33,37,513,184,387,0.185,0.6729999999999999,0.142,-0.9582,2,0,3,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,2,1,15,27,2,0,13,1,30,4,1,4,4,76,71,21,0,13,21,0,16,10,0,3,2,0,2,1,17,11,1,0,22,0,0,5,15,10,0,0,14,18,46,16,36,50,4,43,0,7,0,0,13,14,1,9,34,183,63,2,0.11737612332905242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058202787218611565,0.123108171843714,0.06013285460956716,0.09659054840594967,0.052244817473052416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04512749682216839,0.0,0.03577569766780082,0.0,0.049939217896522566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060288805700080474,0.0,0.050554568527870436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493722396702517,0.06446607995941084,0.03784894463141522,0.0,0.20219176606078898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051358318254495335,0.0,0.13756394236989766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04902634483312157,0.06601617017544756,0.0,0.0,0.06545270224442881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3264189209218646,0.29348734085696704,0.2253989708600766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030662089959297523,0.0,0.06670755582172408,0.049224761687978534,0.0,0.06470379517219843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06023088277400403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801211192745785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4437522426374305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901369546166522,0.0478386032478353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041453113565835135,0.28672022480788,0.0,0.0,0.1038741755350146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106412592988146,0.039174736881338684,0.0,0.058960046153647576,0.0,0.06518920623284864,0.0,0.0,0.06225875902858145,0.0,0.0,0.04684425090385655,0.0,0.0,0.04351645409051701,0.045263851159920584,0.0,0.0,0.05507477023382994,0.057501839775891364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204879110277267,0.04068691244207905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941371490369054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519415019200196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648213331202274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244889541351063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05982508810510492,0.1491786125951835,0.13554281132587834,0.0,0.0,0.0830794242238946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531280357413529,0.0609993673269117,0.0,0.047171240901681434,0.05129595267582388,0.054032082190940516,0.0,0.06814136297447254,0.0,0.037604940194561114,0.0576607226098325,0.0,0.06844296142695035,0.0,0.05562942024303858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939098256097295,0.09684759436853753,0.20769443594990186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674883745700437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06416618242389306,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,organicjuicebox,2020/02/25,"wanting to start c*tting again I HATE this feeling.. It feels like my mind is all mover the place and I just want to control this ""pain"" but im trying my hardest not to.... im only posting this to tell myself it'' be okay, I just feel like crying right now",-0.7882547169811325,1.3666055283018892,1.0201650943396243,99.54836084905662,97.49056603773585,2.6500000000000004,17.94575471698113,3.1291,-0.9520169811320759,195,6,43,0,8,63,39,53,0.12,0.732,0.14800000000000002,-0.0942,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,1,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,1,13,9,2,0,2,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,6,3,4,8,1,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,26,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23918077992859,0.0,0.0,0.23424782629550314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234805712165916,0.3046952163914399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21054266573644312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4606985268931709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083687714794865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153242046929424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16218811404293995,0.22691566501313384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228034441640415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042369191971675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821164454050525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15094119687890462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18639205950841495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447844298375579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515636656546998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maricdepression,2020/02/25,"New urge. What is this called? I don’t want to die lately but I feel like I need to bleed. I feel so - not sure if heavy is the right word, claustrophobic? (Sorry not a native English speaker) I have is feeling like if I bleed a little, I’d feel lighter, less anxious. Is this menopause? I’m 30yo tho. I also haven’t had my period for 2 months now. I can’t afford to get sick.",-1.5148269230769245,0.4117303250000006,0.8225000000000016,100.12634615384614,102.0,3.4615384615384617,14.903846153846152,5.369823440869387,-1.0069519230769233,286,7,68,2,13,95,55,80,0.159,0.72,0.121,-0.6074,1,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,9,3,0,0,1,13,17,6,1,4,5,0,4,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,5,9,3,4,16,1,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,7,38,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341255300416925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591022535928102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23419383266467514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23803096024621226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4638686488797794,0.3276979460066098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198268502725646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587188222454983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22409941066494105,0.2298707582427801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18306642002023102,0.0,0.0,0.1700614548981898,0.0,0.2215093993204041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19586518554525364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567405647606549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161613588907993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527763497775513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luka--bed,2020/02/25,"Am I selfish? Whenever I started to feel super shitty I will write down my feelings in my notes from the perspective of me having a conversation with myself it may be hard to follow but I wanted to share how I felt because I can't irl.
This one is called the selfish me
Whilst reading it my question is, am I selfish for wanting people to really give a dam about me,to when I'm sad look after me like I do them so much XD. 

Are you ok? You seem off today what's wrong? Let's talk about it over some tea. Let me comfort you. we can sit here in silence for as long as you want. It's ok there's always next time until then ill help you get better. Hey man! Let's do x to cheer you up. I'm sorry x friend is being mean to you I'll try and meditate and do my best. Here's some good advice for your problem. I'm worried sick about x please check in on them whilst I'm away. X is not ok and I dont know what to do.

Is this what they want from me ? Am I a good person? Can I do non of this and still be me? So much pity in this it makes me sick.

Grow up you asshole and do your job.
You do anything to compromise think like this again and I'll fuking kill you bitch.
Your gonna die alone and your gonna live with that knowledge for the rest of your empty life you bitch.",-0.9846082949308724,1.0353964480286777,1.306670762928828,99.8923870967742,91.68817204301077,4.048786482334871,15.49831029185868,5.494401672091744,-0.9509943471582178,975,21,239,6,35,326,151,279,0.228,0.584,0.188,-0.9531,1,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,16,3,3,12,24,3,0,6,3,29,5,0,2,0,32,52,16,2,5,2,0,4,2,1,4,4,0,0,2,14,10,1,0,9,1,1,2,3,10,0,1,1,5,43,14,37,41,6,27,0,2,1,0,32,11,2,5,15,155,57,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759258342102334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352322980292334,0.0,0.0,0.10864562837933878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744890312085408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226758616579274,0.0,0.0,0.07959494042072783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702633068633113,0.11547954138822272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332770820283574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135512203928907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15302837555600232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320413589858286,0.0,0.12536874768376807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008789203568807,0.0,0.06821801900684799,0.12525571227462018,0.0,0.2190337144594964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696607319098555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875190667606407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957168521602333,0.0,0.14445759417801404,0.0,0.07175847064592274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4005534378441412,0.09222624070573812,0.1275809037906808,0.0,0.11529668763709865,0.11555132886203677,0.10964685229774633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715723385806204,0.0,0.0,0.14223022360192938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919695879891956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388638632056023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847836743577736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052157142543643,0.11400966216344095,0.0,0.14332787564171706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493892403592287,0.0,0.0,0.146269532568559,0.0,0.13060645043840574,0.0,0.08364720039976185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886704013469684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461636743921099,0.09241890797898944,0.0,0.10427426193516592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494811712701768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836646989278719,0.0,0.0,0.07613706778805028,0.0,0.12376615072609624,0.0,0.0,0.08864921687803183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30805690888553244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13260130641146547,0.0,0.0,0.14275901799259794,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kalel1441,2020/02/25,"STOP IT! - Why Seeking Happiness is DUMB and Why Peace is Better!  Today I start my new line of videos in the STOP IT category - videos dedicated to ending ideas that need to be changed for the better. In this video, we start off that process with the idea of pursuing HAPPINESS. Our favorite, non-sustainable emotion!  Happiness is the WRONG things to chase because it is an emotion and emotions change far too often. Peace, however, is sustainable among different feelings and emotions. It is therefore more obtainable and sustainable than the pursuit of happiness.  I'm Christopher Missimo, a licensed therapist making Mental Health videos! I'm also the owner and founder of Missimo Motivation LLC, a business focused on holistic care for mental and physical health! 

​

 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_9zV5KdN3qw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_9zV5KdN3qw)",9.879402035623409,13.76076477099237,7.043072519083974,64.01107188295168,61.59541984732825,10.16819338422392,39.92430025445292,10.317481424215053,5.372327735368956,719,38,86,19,12,204,84,131,0.083,0.653,0.264,0.9833,2,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,2,0,0,5,3,9,1,0,9,0,7,2,0,4,0,19,15,7,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,8,0,2,4,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,7,16,14,1,13,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,1,7,54,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839924543062325,0.0,0.11977064994774245,0.1343188789619376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738449902178943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19552828364665625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127034674703419,0.0,0.2338745094215749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549135723468885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49737300397789097,0.09790612546942902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055892628214715336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4706899239819151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349988911068055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24957367308310796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378668177407187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22279776895575096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196442415526606,0.0,0.10676076110924217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648235381261227,0.0,0.0,0.18483371470671264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283461093989897,0.07343823586128605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477952516139363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19949132278402015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120858748777563,0.1343188789619376,0.0
mentalhealth,Sumetto,2020/02/25,"How do I get my energy and motivation back? There are a few things in my life I feel like this is affecting my mental health.

**Motivation & Skill**

I am doing a bachelor study (Business & IT) and last semester I did an internship which drained all my energy. Not because it was hard work, but because it was boring. The last 4-5 years I was full of motivation to achieve a good life where I am doing what I like. In one semester that was gone.

As I am going deeper into the study you need to specify what to specialise in. I came to the conclusion I don't know which direction I want to go in. Everybody around me seems to have something they do with all their dedication (eg. a friend of mine is a designer and loves to use photoshop and design stuff). I don't have this, but I have a drive to work hard and effectively. But on wat is the question now. Every day I wake up (most of the time I sleep through my alarm) and stay in bed for a few hours because I am too tired.

**Losing my best friend**

Ever since she and her boyfriend moved into the student apartment I live in I felt left out. She, her boyfriend and another flatmate always make fun of me during our weekly eating together. Since Christmas this fell apart and I don't feel like starting it up again, because I don't get joy out of that. The last few months it feels like it's gotten worse. We never talk about serious stuff anymore, she always wants to watch video's and gets annoyed when I start talking.

One time friends were coming over and she came into my room to tell me they arrived. She saw I cried and asked what was going on. I told her we can talk later as I didn't want to kill her mood. She never asked again. It feels like she doesn't care anymore. It feels like I am the only one trying to stay friends.

**Nobody loves me**

This is the feeling I get. Of course my family loves me. But all my 'friends' rarely text me. Nobody is putting effort in a friendship, is this wrong from me to expect? Of course I try to, but if I am not getting anything back why should I?

And of course there is the girlfriend part. I have been single for about 3 years now. Met 2 women that I had feelings for, and expressed them. They seemed to like me as well, but after a few months it was just a play. This frustrates me as (so I am told) I am good guy and any girl is lucky to have me.

​

What are my expectations from this post? Maybe someone can tell me what's going on in my mind if they have/had the same feeling. Maybe someone has a tip to find professional help (I live in the Netherlands). And neither of those work out I hope that this helps me to get it straight in my own mind.",1.4431625066383449,3.677123107806693,2.6106890600106247,93.45661245353165,81.8624535315985,5.6272437599575165,21.317180031864048,6.868970318607317,0.39032915560276216,2064,63,448,24,56,659,243,538,0.064,0.7340000000000001,0.20199999999999999,0.9977,0,1,1,0,0,0,79.0,3,1,6,13,19,34,3,1,24,0,47,10,2,8,6,82,93,31,1,10,11,0,11,7,6,1,4,0,2,3,33,29,1,0,19,2,0,12,11,8,1,3,20,13,81,25,64,72,15,71,0,1,2,3,47,30,0,8,33,311,114,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858614895195634,0.21209444711783013,0.07928566913332194,0.044372112808502895,0.06842012195521728,0.0,0.0,0.1294205698630143,0.0,0.0,0.0536950394279472,0.058086170550174815,0.12199954091104605,0.0,0.0,0.10034616268941844,0.0,0.1591027303219293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847565694173646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492568149119464,0.06652653670943608,0.0,0.0,0.05620693939863074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167385965421319,0.0420807337328431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06676685202984109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05902219474910629,0.05497578469810439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615117200179238,0.0,0.2639381425379205,0.2330724101298675,0.06265005648629819,0.0,0.05963715028433408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25205923228080684,0.0,0.20454201656107351,0.0,0.1483318978554979,0.10945690083708044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460757700858573,0.0,0.0,0.11690203863054947,0.0,0.0,0.06935750384080991,0.0,0.0,0.08747115333739837,0.0,0.0,0.06480779063000525,0.06425792578931977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218925451784737,0.0,0.03585959278047012,0.15956192795022267,0.0,0.0,0.07089411666858837,0.0,0.09217575028041093,0.22314435151152914,0.0,0.11523356700295954,0.0,0.0,0.07299785453342801,0.0,0.0,0.17667152104891834,0.0,0.04355475926241597,0.0,0.13110442191872618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575646822541484,0.0,0.131767428294922,0.0,0.10416356220212923,0.06935022879385402,0.0,0.04838191224123616,0.10064936219134096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13264489324681816,0.04962542580365605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065919284384473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062491287600168775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06559408781650672,0.07309472772879204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880196486579445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795064515081686,0.0,0.06529693925037099,0.0,0.11057191574534966,0.05023249664642858,0.0,0.0,0.0923683120755196,0.13909524549055896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493908582804402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733599292360767,0.11406243144397835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043349078813282496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609538558452157,0.07499506556104836,0.0,0.1246979919866758,0.0,0.08860068473977224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05635489160071916,0.0,0.0,0.11545809720869435,0.0,0.05233946707881405,0.0,0.058667421323185386,0.0,0.05887781053363547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425079308478436,0.0,0.06649513757659899,0.0,0.07134043137867854,0.07928566913332194,0.08403748519921228
mentalhealth,DrezZone,2020/02/25,"How can I stop overthinking? Alright, so sometimes I overthink way too much and I ended up emotionally hurting myself. Like I just want to stop overthinking all together but the thing is, I've never been in a relationship before. So with me being in my first one, I overthink a lot of things and I tend to be insecure at times. This always ends up with me being in a bad mood, no appetite, little sleep, and intense chest pressure. 

The only thing I found to be helping me out when this happens is CBD. However, I don't want to rely on CBD for the rest of my life as I only started to use it last week. 

Is there any advice or any tips for me to stop overthinking the simplest of things in relationships?",4.190575539568346,5.378513273381298,5.4511438848920895,80.73801079136692,70.94244604316546,8.149928057553957,29.007913669064752,8.548686976883017,2.167785035971223,551,21,106,9,10,184,89,139,0.156,0.7759999999999999,0.068,-0.9388,1,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,2,7,1,10,3,2,2,2,20,17,10,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,6,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,2,0,16,2,23,11,4,23,0,1,0,0,3,10,0,2,13,83,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459028864062081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12423692938056685,0.0,0.0,0.20307028469701344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466665843146828,0.0,0.0,0.12705083965153968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16795236699038465,0.26448665904961943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127002036951428,0.0,0.1637094543861682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203332858539488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007857912728113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983821882024615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12170664592681925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546126083958393,0.0729447653393386,0.14964669892385982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693705034811467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975918912705064,0.0,0.11515619462936515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117554521795123,0.2271122267639201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32060366891736364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941668543756476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14767027676467698,0.0,0.10568157702513073,0.0,0.0,0.3744866685928668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3967766788098346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706319485769816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12895491286178276,0.0,0.0,0.17613246388883622,0.11851442042903294,0.11976655840634218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chfdbz69,2020/02/25,"NO ""Me Time"" I've made a lot of new friends so far this year, built strong relationships and even moved in with a buddy of mine last month after **living alone with my cat for over a year.** Struggling with anxiety, depression and mood disorder, I thought it was great that I was putting myself out there and networking!

>But I didn't realize that I have absolutely no time for myself. When I'm invited out and I say 'no', you can tell my friends are either annoyed or think I don't want to be around them. But if I say yes, I keep pushing ""ME"" time further and further away from my grasp. 

What hurts the most like Rascal Flats is that I feel like I'm begging to be left alone and no one is listening. It's like I keep getting picked on for not going out or for needing more time to decompress than most people do. I feel crazier than I am at times because I need such ""huge accommodations"" to keep me running (like alone time). 

I love hanging out with my friends and tossing rocks but I'm drained. And I don't want to hurt my friend's feelings since they all come from a caring place. I also don't appreciate being told ""We need to get you out"" or ""I'm making you go out, you never do"" or ""This is just what you need."" NO IT'S NOT!!! 

Granted, I lived alone for a long time but even then I would get so stressed when I had no time to myself...

Thoughts? Suggestions? HALP??",2.8810595160235413,4.319633417266189,3.727390451275344,90.84578155657292,74.53956834532373,6.9250490516677585,25.586003924133426,7.520522993642371,1.0580158273381297,1062,36,235,13,22,339,150,278,0.171,0.722,0.107,-0.9237,0,4,0,0,0,0,48.0,1,5,2,1,12,19,1,2,6,1,20,1,0,3,2,59,51,22,0,8,12,0,3,4,4,1,0,3,0,0,10,21,0,3,8,1,0,8,13,6,0,1,8,6,39,12,35,39,6,45,0,3,0,1,20,18,0,8,23,153,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37927533260546703,0.0,0.0732129985512999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003597449325469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149946256430264,0.0,0.0,0.08601482210801936,0.0,0.0,0.05580840883007475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334195965630022,0.0,0.0,0.07886275356051936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885241573186202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492494325979733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12093664349506633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887223432434612,0.06540378194752162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829271307876867,0.0,0.14349426260719486,0.0,0.10406065541817452,0.0,0.0,0.10093488287378634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19601366658825228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24412319537166802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746259752278103,0.0,0.0,0.09947001760892522,0.0,0.0,0.17890803611448047,0.0,0.16168175128701953,0.08101941867038083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783306410781869,0.0826280098431071,0.08662741120808938,0.061110750431348615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307483225222955,0.09730382157880986,0.0,0.2715345018028313,0.0706094828453917,0.08842016026664984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620370701500964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346967331526493,0.0,0.09565091340679918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920336605737023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829110510924073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456094568118277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573161976362065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487092705819057,0.09570858685833113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001927802618652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05866194129590501,0.0,0.14536193356845206,0.42707122676678,0.0,0.0,0.08748054169781391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079978565417442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503493445513348,0.0,0.0,0.11791119666040245
mentalhealth,iwiw71zNa,2020/02/25,It feels like my mind is stopping me from feeling anything I can’t properly explain it but I can’t feel happy sad angry or afraid anymore It feels like my brain is subconsciously blocking theses feelings out.It’s been like this for the past 9 days and it’s beginning to make me lose my mind. It’s like I am constantly on the verge of tears but I don’t feel sad at all just nothing. Can somebody please tell me what this is and how to fix this.,2.3108870967741915,4.035421956989246,3.40826612903226,91.33239919354841,76.74193548387099,6.370430107526883,25.603494623655912,7.1686216300943375,1.0065494623655913,354,13,77,4,8,114,61,93,0.233,0.606,0.161,-0.8399,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,9,0,1,2,0,9,1,1,2,1,20,18,6,0,0,4,0,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,2,7,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,6,10,5,7,17,1,8,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,1,9,46,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713068614172066,0.0,0.0,0.14214631704698566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928295632777286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18666534051189668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139988688871667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5240405159819165,0.37020609417392303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18387978769117844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3375586920412471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932464578628785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530205927734448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34882653664888097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16574404279664792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16489525370419286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896113320926426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444143266587029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15097814170471568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,axahtaint,2020/02/25,"support worker or sucky worker so my partner and I have a support worker but we have issues. 

1 he told us to hold on to forms for 7 days while he was on holiday but we knew where the head office was so we handed them in ourselves and we got accepted within the 7days our support worker was away yay for us. 

2 he mentioned in a meeting that we could apply for special housing trust and me and the partner thought ok he will suss this out and get back to us but he only yesterday sent us the forms 

3 do i have reason to rant 🤣",0.016447876447877263,2.291778810810815,2.172413127413126,93.60912162162165,89.7207207207207,4.252509652509653,20.54118404118404,5.773587663045528,0.0465129987129993,412,14,87,3,14,138,70,111,0.04,0.7290000000000001,0.231,0.9744,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,10,0,1,4,4,8,0,0,6,2,9,2,2,1,0,21,18,12,0,1,4,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,2,11,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,15,8,14,8,2,13,0,0,0,0,22,8,0,1,4,62,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403175109708829,0.11483951502702396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924235183850293,0.0,0.0,0.09631720684363793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802824859789137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944736541262425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327429736847956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17232772281959086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588067540361986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358600427881395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535547806410213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5084355605757044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185657553451964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14270856543778576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7185897827620792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hbdoma98,2020/02/25,"Not suicidal, but don’t want to be alive kinda. Today has been shitttt. I am senior in college and I am just tired of the school that I go to. I drive 40 minutes to get there and 40 minutes back. Next quarter I have to come 4 days a week. I have 7 classes left, until I met with my advisor and told me I have 8. Which means I either take 5 classes or come back in the fall. I am tired of the driving. I am tired of the work. I am tired. When she told me that I wanted to just break down. I have been going to school non stop since I graduated high school. I have been going to summer classes as well except for 1 summer. Barely having any breaks. I just feel like laying down and shutting my eyes forever. Idk.",0.3390999999999984,2.367479093333337,2.3835833333333305,94.671375,84.73333333333333,4.816666666666666,18.708333333333336,5.985473137389443,-0.2623666666666669,544,14,123,4,16,182,89,150,0.133,0.779,0.08800000000000001,-0.8296,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,8,2,0,0,5,0,17,5,1,0,0,21,31,9,1,2,8,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,2,0,0,8,2,0,1,1,6,2,22,2,19,24,1,29,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,2,13,83,25,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052313010787788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20471526294370712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293344971021012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08584850920155329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673072153463395,0.09509776646335233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954737411158254,0.0,0.2269578825331812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14064387373494147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446304207953767,0.0,0.0,0.06503352761191733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450018443048669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415698841089211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.404160091419465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011454805397687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129054972363266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560679230854018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000863176360396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6119869122779924,0.12617796459369873,0.25439520091181844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702998563890538,0.0,0.10677725463738924,0.0,0.11968685458932475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690969657164017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Snoot-Snout,2020/02/25,"I'm exhausted of feeling like I'm a fucking obese pig anytime I'm at my families house. I get told, ""You're eating too much of the soup, you gotta stop eating that."" I was eating one can a day.

I get told, ""You're eating too much lunch meat,"" when I've went through a small pack in approximately a weeks time.

I get told, ""Geez, you're eating again.""

Everything in this house is either ""for something"" or I dare not eat on a daily basis because, ""I eat too much."" ""You gotta slow down."" WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU WANT ME TO EAT? ASS? YOUR BELIEFS ALREADY CONDEMN MY FUCKING SEXUAL LIFESTYLE. 

Out of all adults in this house, I am the lightest. Am I overweight? Yes. Why? Because I binge eat when I can't take eating less than 1000 calories a day anymore.

I'm not sorry about who I am but if everything I am is an issue to you why don't you stop pretending like you give a fuck you lousy fucks. I hate my family. God, I haven't dealt with suicidal ideation in years, but the fucking *second* I moved back into this house it started again.",0.1789713884500621,2.511353739336496,2.0539863085834646,94.25556959803406,89.80568720379148,4.832087063366684,20.137089696331397,6.42735559955562,0.18959912234509435,793,26,172,9,27,261,118,211,0.172,0.742,0.086,-0.9645,0,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,8,0,0,9,10,7,0,12,1,12,21,1,0,1,16,37,6,1,2,7,0,1,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,7,3,13,2,2,1,0,2,5,8,0,2,5,1,27,2,19,30,6,26,1,0,0,7,14,10,7,2,16,99,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724299809837593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694178270205882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05382307133345837,0.0,0.0853385657603049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09028404366501673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7162400520755625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581687669439845,0.0,0.13197314598329138,0.0,0.03539238843992442,0.050005591126022264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3882644201021612,0.1097110168739616,0.06714712507038874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910715948932851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32306675331635265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305827362456535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839361453347381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743953173957667,0.1543666835668146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04743151347228222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05388680897796875,0.0,0.07835547255231431,0.049543959794250185,0.0,0.0,0.11704059795799425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765649288320397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052628738435678266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04081558533672376,0.0,0.0,0.20065427729242755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04128581326571064,0.0,0.056147057239394886,0.0,0.0,0.06488755738137618,0.12632210386033546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04507552096995756
mentalhealth,MrDavis223,2020/02/25,Need help. I’m really close to killing myself and I don’t know what do someone help me before I can’t take it anymore.,-0.06820512820512903,2.043201923076925,2.313076923076924,93.91525641025645,87.46153846153845,5.005128205128205,20.2051282051282,6.42735559955562,0.1736820512820514,94,3,21,1,3,32,21,26,0.166,0.6409999999999999,0.192,-0.0679,0,0,0,0,0,2,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,7,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,11,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677070574080656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3155004036665545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4970424784225306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4102052460955115,0.0,0.2037670728094424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27492338506669384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375265947105682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3141546495563246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787750549947716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Autiseer,2020/02/25,Heard voices once. Doubted every sound ever since. Anyone got any tips how to stop this?,1.8429166666666683,4.3759291250000025,1.9775000000000027,90.38416666666667,101.5,2.1333333333333333,11.583333333333332,3.1291,-1.4207666666666667,70,1,11,0,3,21,16,16,0.235,0.765,0.0,-0.5106,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28643416838496355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945166633149774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810044687792279,0.3548837811548788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3368764981314089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44857008677398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484255235246458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3521466394412713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NOT_SELLING_KIDNEYS,2020/02/25,"I have no fucking clue what's going on. I've been to 10+ psychiatrists and neurologists over the past 10 years and nobody knows what's going on either. I have a pretty great life, and there are few things I could really ask for that would make a huge impact on my mental health. I have good friends, a wonderful girlfriend, and a pretty decent family. Adding to that, I have the education I want, the career opportunities I could ask for, good personal finances, no debt... you get the point. There's nothing I can complain about really, at least compared to how the vast majority have it.

I can have a great day, hanging out with people, and in the middle of having fun, suddenly... **BAM**... I start panicking, get a headache and feel completely like shit. The first minute or so it's mostly discomfort, but it quickly turns into me feeling like absolute garbage, and I get severely suicidal. At this point I can start crying, shaking, get nausea, or become furiously angry. I've had moments where I've rushed out of something, and just kept running, or grabbed something and hurt myself.

When it hits I feel completely miserable, and I get bombarded by intrusive thoughts about killing myself in the most cruel way, or hurting others. The thoughts are like Hannibal Lecter but on steroids. I never do any of it, though, because I manage to suppress it. However, this feeling has made me do really dangerous things that could have killed me.

After a while, or after having taken a nap, it fades away. In this fade I am completely disassociated, can't recognize myself in the mirror properly, and everything feels unreal and scary to me, from my own shadow to a simple carrot. The next day, or after two days, I feel good again.

I don't know what the fuck is going on. My doctors don't know either and are pretty confused.",5.120680209997719,6.971293198813058,5.886958456973296,75.94194647340794,69.53412462908011,8.982834969185118,29.282013238986536,9.466822959209583,2.8496173019858477,1436,55,247,32,26,469,185,337,0.212,0.6659999999999999,0.121,-0.9936,2,0,2,0,0,3,64.0,0,1,0,2,12,26,8,4,21,0,29,6,1,3,1,54,62,26,3,5,11,0,7,3,2,1,3,0,0,1,19,17,0,2,12,1,2,7,6,15,0,2,7,7,30,11,35,50,8,51,0,3,0,2,7,22,3,10,24,178,49,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061263141613309466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16844082191551446,0.0,0.08464093491716729,0.0,0.0,0.0549169989991367,0.09949546303897996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833676442852361,0.0,0.0,0.21578456041941252,0.0,0.09895778082325396,0.1742985258100976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220920499181423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096556615338292,0.0,0.08492724316733866,0.0,0.2733081452516939,0.06435910829652998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662907240754484,0.0,0.0,0.06960200659726998,0.16657038608655894,0.2353371245533689,0.0,0.15359779187172748,0.2266854063995925,0.0,0.198645364666645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957596632390008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928828031026619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19933873969772492,0.0,0.14853054125594198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06363203919444366,0.1320377965373262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524373932784057,0.06013464799710129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078782978557454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948166020207859,0.0,0.09580994214416656,0.0,0.0,0.086442165332179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599948778055097,0.062455892561688514,0.07866163941861708,0.0,0.0,0.17032514844944185,0.0,0.0,0.2749566027786269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313863907754293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177415026286607,0.09247435795618693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870876822662964,0.0,0.0,0.12752994223391018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854199171446386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970134330117968,0.0,0.08851130941615884,0.1430401139834928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799021425541994,0.08800319075818454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053136420693074365,0.07150790902564702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09769693176240654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399615228694387,0.0,0.0,0.058013919449866336
mentalhealth,Narnocastelo,2020/02/25,"Relapse and non-linear recovery I spent most of 2019 in a terrible depression which involved 1 suicide attempt and months of not getting out of bed. Slowly, I weaned myself off the many medications I was on, and with the help of a new psychiatrist, found one antidepressant that seemed to help with the massive anxiety/sadness I was experiencing.

In November, my journey to recovery began. I forced myself to go on a 30 min walk every day, and started alternating walking and running, until I was running most of the way. This gave me energy and much needed endorphines, and boosted my self-esteem. It was a huge achievement for me. I started planning to run my first 5k.

In December I joined a yoga center and started going  twice a week, though I found it extremely challenging, especially having to focus my mind. But I was determined to make it a habit because I could tell it had a positive effect.

I downloaded a meditation app, and started doing guided meditations every night before sleep. I started with 5 min and moved slowly up to 20 min.

I drank as little as possible during the holidays, and cut down on my drinking in general, instead enjoying the company of my family and trying to be in high spirits sober. 

Since the year started, I reached out to friends and tried to leave the house often. I still wasn't able to fix my sleeping patterns: I'd usually stay up til 3 or 4 am and get up at 1 pm, but that was progress compated to staying in bed all day.

Finally, I took two really big steps: I started looking for a job and I downloaded Tinder. This is where things started to go wrong. I had the luxury of not having to work for months because I am living with my mom, who provides me food and shelter at no cost. My husband of 4 years divorced me in July due to my inability to pull myself out of depression, and I had no desire to go on dates with anyone obviously for several months.

Everything went to shit once I got a job and started seeing someone almost simultaneously. The pressure of having to be ok/show up at work looking happy and full of energy (I'm a language teacher, so I have to command attention and keep the class interested) plus seeing this guy I immediately liked slowly pull away as I couldn't hide my enormous loneliness and need for affection threw me completely off my game (we went on four dates and then he stopped reaching out).

My family was devastated as I once again attempted suicide. People at work never found out and we made up another reason for me to be hospitalized. As soon as I got home I started trying to get back to where I was but it was impossible. Add to that my crush stopped texting me. We just had a week long holiday in my country which I spent literally in bed, sleeping or crying. I broke my exercise routine for the first time in months. I tried to run today but It was like my body weighed a million pounds and I walked most of the way.

I'm terrified I'm going to fall back into total depression and lose my job. Does anyone have any advice? Have you experienced anything like this before?

TL;DR after months of positive work to get myself out of depression had a sudden very bad relapse and am afraid will lose everything achieved through massive effort so far",6.581792411303816,7.027351879478829,7.563325116647597,70.3940923496787,65.2214983713355,10.676925785720574,35.812835636939866,10.524129630991565,3.9815054670305483,2570,118,444,62,37,868,300,614,0.145,0.758,0.09699999999999999,-0.9912,3,0,1,0,1,2,60.0,3,1,0,17,13,22,2,2,28,0,33,11,5,5,4,81,79,45,2,5,9,2,0,3,1,1,2,0,4,1,17,43,4,3,7,6,3,22,7,14,0,7,31,6,67,8,99,42,7,121,1,7,4,0,17,45,1,8,53,309,84,11,0.062234602065784225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060814932862467634,0.0,0.0,0.06231896419924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04232166352017278,0.06525840660089115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870317615819385,0.0,0.05121377476838395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05847145727862859,0.09570913495172306,0.0519632931838649,0.07587527155721963,0.0,0.10591412512589968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912861310834413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652517962031207,0.0,0.0,0.049689265673868964,0.0,0.06836178805748516,0.08027233958451922,0.0,0.21441028626401687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05446191965935024,0.0,0.0,0.060966217064011126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487067279360136,0.0,0.11186489485284024,0.0,0.11733848817975548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817496455975025,0.0,0.10587344144918974,0.0752543278512832,0.2047110867236908,0.04808229917641959,0.0,0.13006004376359154,0.0,0.17684679275476298,0.0,0.09954939302220507,0.0,0.0,0.06162204055532487,0.0,0.06624989114675041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342908383117206,0.06575427399925772,0.06242638017127115,0.0,0.0,0.0718103750062953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852747187809715,0.0553169738233056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589745762051334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121404893450233,0.06237542088651379,0.05495429381485298,0.055075664419502686,0.1045227831004108,0.13924920143384512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058887885244370525,0.04154208013851595,0.06309611838766101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269481416907073,0.0,0.0,0.06283920699565552,0.07288841376955893,0.2483753280808581,0.06614553290998708,0.04574959332344266,0.09229233771999916,0.047999161754651305,0.060106566483486265,0.0,0.05840295815117505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255564016474838,0.042171777003936345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04314563700522988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016016290838246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039869079691404,0.06398753608196336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918584061067608,0.05665604435250219,0.0649242628169886,0.07030738595914203,0.06388292468526473,0.0514811059434493,0.0,0.1868386414533189,0.0,0.05273117637142182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4404997166190099,0.1326676104496698,0.049700633601448066,0.10406182801601437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361491071506251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05439578530661925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04134590424762538,0.0,0.061145180547299366,0.0,0.03628949694197113,0.0,0.05899112585734668,0.0,0.06914493280306691,0.16901283846438786,0.0,0.060794163176906474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854262173710836,0.05135006443906446,0.0,0.09879786067507472,0.09984168768768914,0.0,0.0,0.1153841992335588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18123012605769667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804376760742932,0.0,0.08015408657757267
mentalhealth,BadHairDayBeaver,2020/02/25,"Really vivid daydreams. I have a history of psychosis just for reference. I'm not sure if this is related or something else. It's probably just my overactive imagination.

So, for a while, I've been having really vivid daydreams or daynightmares. I don't even know if they classify as daydreams. They normally start with a normal thought. I'm going to write out what I can remember from earlier.

I have to go to the store after school.

Mike works at that store.

I wonder if he's going to be working.

Then I thought about a few different ways I could say hi if he even showed up.

Then I left the store and went outside and got into the car.

My mom was in the front and I was all the way in the back.

I set down my many textbooks and we drove home.

My mom slammed on the breaks and my textbooks fell onto my infant brother killing him.

I was completely overcome with dread and guilt. I kept thinking I killed my brother, I killed my brother.

My mother pressed charges but the jury didn't favor her.

I felt like I should be in prison and wanted the death penalty. (Even though that's not how that works)

They buried my brother but I wasn't allowed to go to the funeral.

My family disowned me.

I tried to hang myself but it hurt too much.

I looked around my house for something to kill myself with and slit my wrist which for some reason hurt less than hanging.

Whenever I cut into my arm the cut would instantly heal itself so I keep cutting and cutting then as if there was a glitch in a video game all the cuts reappeared and my arms went numb.

My teacher then said something loudly and got my attention.

My eyes were watery and I was trying to hide it so I looked down at my paper.

My body was numb from anxiety and I still felt extreme guilt.

It happens multiple times a day. I know its normal to daydream and then forget where you are. But, I'm concerned that this could be a psychosis rising again. 

I don't remember much the first time I just remember it being like I was dreaming all my senses were dulled and I felt like I needed to get out because of danger. Though I don't remember what I was scared of. (If I was scared of anything in particular.) I was in a mental hospital and thought all the staff was trying to poison me. However, I trusted some, so I don't really know what I thought at that time. It was like 4 years ago to so the memories are faded anyway. 

A few weeks ago, my mom and I were arguing and when I ran out of things to be mad about, I brought up things I remembered from years ago, specifically a few weeks before my psychosis. She says these things didn't happen. She wouldn't lie to me, so I'm questioning my memory during and around the time of the psychosis.

Anyways this is a long way of saying I'm worried this could be the beginning of a new psychosis because I don't remember things that happened before my last (and only) psychosis.

There is a good chance this could just be my overactive imagination (fingers crossed). I'm a bit of a hypochondriac. However, can anyone else relate to momentary memory loss due to an overactive imagination? Is this normal or concerning?",3.2281116635271587,5.219472531914897,4.220931352870334,85.33377358490569,74.90834697217676,7.557310934749715,26.74925115029491,8.393068210462019,1.888260389710651,2451,93,479,45,53,793,265,611,0.183,0.78,0.037000000000000005,-0.9981,5,0,3,0,0,2,64.0,1,1,3,5,30,32,13,5,35,0,49,10,6,3,5,101,91,51,6,19,19,8,5,4,0,3,4,5,1,1,29,31,0,2,25,4,3,16,11,24,0,1,35,15,82,8,64,42,13,76,0,4,5,0,29,24,0,13,35,339,111,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16385523914735348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047135680191320736,0.0,0.0,0.043082982316644126,0.06313234953441309,0.05070429720390214,0.10970169633508768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04737850749791233,0.0,0.0751204600102834,0.0,0.10486048534329424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726815536708845,0.06844091770604809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460266759742862,0.0,0.0,0.1967798160526808,0.0,0.0,0.039736892876510534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437507148251116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294366893092276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12208934749121472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058085599089600363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748159519569046,0.0,0.0,0.0524101031950651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03219154974987678,0.0,0.14007000858573646,0.05168014857786603,0.09855906995908444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634591194547926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06180535896607953,0.0,0.0,0.07109600128305008,0.13192130998793886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05476667739962937,0.2726736365218834,0.0,0.10158678358315007,0.05022484698406348,0.0,0.0,0.06694540873549076,0.0,0.0,0.12040886180232427,0.0,0.0,0.05452776855559563,0.10348298446795907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06246843458833586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06209392047200976,0.0,0.0,0.21648994696486784,0.0,0.0,0.0905889474978332,0.045687104129323405,0.0,0.05950862291771975,0.0,0.0,0.24148038679845535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04686135564152556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643191809447374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690234486888181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841737940982455,0.06335098440836255,0.0,0.0,0.4187900247177317,0.0,0.05861043953977465,0.1469973289893025,0.12337570615551464,0.06235816403827703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14230384033923632,0.0,0.0,0.0436117600210037,0.0,0.049206208851954696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05807186889170333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637383712969244,0.039480717221863165,0.12107380957868626,0.195663261980726,0.14371394779216462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549861680080338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036342411625828616,0.14672252084817705,0.09884845686049616,0.0,0.0,0.1142363506113657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681936913286737,0.1345704287882752,0.06257351964170704,0.0,0.0437698753236584,0.0,0.0,0.07935670913376011
mentalhealth,Anxious-Pitch,2020/02/25,"Just Venting and Dumping frustration Hey there, I just want to vent out, could not think of another blog , so here i go dumping my pitch. 

​

I move out recently to start working as a health provider. The experience, i believe, is necessary but I have been feeling really down the weather, and also like I dont know anything. The worst part is that, seeing myself as someone who does not know how to help  ( dont remember many things)  is frustraiting.  AND it is only been a month !!!!!!! . well that is all . This makes me believe someone hears me and my complaining.  

Thanks",3.820849056603773,6.314104481132077,4.240226415094341,83.54203773584909,74.94339622641509,7.636226415094339,30.411320754716982,8.548686976883017,2.61099924528302,449,21,81,9,10,141,75,106,0.114,0.737,0.149,0.617,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,1,8,8,3,0,5,0,11,1,0,2,1,21,22,10,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,6,0,0,5,1,0,2,4,5,1,0,2,3,11,3,9,19,3,8,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,4,60,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273974011893866,0.0,0.17260859487857455,0.19357491149460346,0.0,0.16704682191254702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109572787342166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3589678876817462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12719332797614882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13941024717306974,0.0,0.3734122116860933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15583238753106154,0.0,0.0,0.08055018507807997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905375911973511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16933542737585106,0.17955007499210596,0.0,0.10677983140399296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510144202830882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782913998841076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633836810046582,0.16151185112651312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271569790269043,0.16931766544502552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115982008894274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17251348384318388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205586378715173,0.0,0.1572960124634315,0.0,0.1804632813655425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694670553380955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699598683868485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127580055158416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666808006033796,0.0,0.0,0.10583620200699144,0.10207721330504042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396313857983707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323573243931076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597707548200807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19357491149460346,0.0
mentalhealth,al5252,2020/02/25,"I'm the healthiest I've ever been, but.. I'm honestly the healthiest and happiest I've ever been in my life, I suffered with depression at a few points during my teenage years due to home life things and then other stuff when I was 18 but now I'm 20 and I've been doing good, getting into mindfulness and creating healthy habits. I still have a bit of anxiety but I know how to control it in the most part and not let is consume me, I feel good, I'm in a job that I enjoy I have a boyfriend who I love and I know loves me, my household is stable and I feel, really quite happy considering I know how it feels to be so unhappy.

But... it's like my body isnt happy, I've got a skin conditions that's flaring up again like its stress induced but I dont feel stressed, I keep detaching from my body more often, my appetite is fluctuating and I'm struggling falling asleep again. It's like my body and my mind just aren't working together at all and I don't know what to do because I dont feel unhappy but all the signs my body are giving me point to that.

If anyone could offer any advice or suggestions thatd be much appreciated or even just a few questions I might not have asked myself idk.. i just a bit.. lost",1.9959556191839667,3.6743849448818895,3.9182390837508936,87.53447387258413,77.50393700787401,7.452827487473158,24.931281317108088,8.296473431620573,1.4978803149606303,952,34,207,18,22,323,133,254,0.10099999999999999,0.6559999999999999,0.242,0.9921,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,4,15,17,0,3,11,0,24,10,6,4,4,52,46,24,0,2,14,0,6,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,14,12,0,2,11,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,6,6,30,11,15,34,10,20,0,3,0,2,8,9,0,7,13,138,44,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09979938280738664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945129592179168,0.0,0.0781284884464518,0.0,0.0,0.07141104726827327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547693001123138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062256956600429625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22299707050284254,0.4537696646411083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11454647937308893,0.0815417827989553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796365148135317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23938910903797286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745531294754073,0.18476325124136472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581977294156542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053358243956554516,0.097971546957854,0.0,0.17132210141820306,0.08168197772193432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21743667011700984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244382290253418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134738138503316,0.09077704416484424,0.0,0.0,0.22450994845159847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443393287814863,0.14427361926996746,0.1496853709863115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148598626262124,0.0,0.18435101557706607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834284476659004,0.20624257165438456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507664585758868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059587207333567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930900371148345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11440797484050225,0.10862687818741958,0.0,0.0,0.06542652205666158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08156043795654233,0.0,0.2339770974079515,0.10676751878861243,0.1169133950328492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785004161490889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435120732421836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576779742585581
mentalhealth,supremenickv2,2020/02/25,"No one asks if I’m okay, how fucked is this world I isolate my self from social media and friends and all I get is a text message saying why aren’t you on snapchat. So I’m like fuck that I ain’t replying back. No one fucking asks if I’m okay not even my own fucking parents, it’s like they look at me and pay no attention to the way I look. I just cba. I’m slipping away again it fucking hurts so much to be falling down again. All my work colleagues are so nice and they know something is up and all I can do is pretend I’m okay. I’m just gonna stay on do not disturb mode for awhile and sort myself out.",-0.9918562091503276,1.031091644444448,1.0552069716775598,101.64137254901958,91.8148148148148,3.769063180827888,19.793028322440087,5.0885558068054335,-0.5573834422657953,472,16,117,2,17,155,84,135,0.168,0.6920000000000001,0.14,-0.4812,2,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,2,1,10,14,5,1,2,3,11,5,0,1,3,20,29,12,0,2,6,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,1,4,7,0,0,2,1,1,1,7,7,0,2,0,3,14,7,11,27,5,14,0,1,2,5,11,8,5,3,5,72,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853331887019723,0.0,0.1433789480482641,0.1173450750730909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079523679671673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179035002121748,0.7054118304711691,0.07973066315533227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16336854875554385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386861030129786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911177740541706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256302260718433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218342879832097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068203976971988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16945159770896798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135891368432275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15920199254057624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556323637031932,0.0,0.11748403590335857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16265835769842374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113203597363305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770374296409918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109944081342513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoCreativeInput,2020/02/25,"I am More Jan 24, 1:15pm

I just weighed myself and weigh **0.7. Two days ago I was **1.7

I looked at my weight loss tracking app.
I saw that my weight loss has been .29% per week since December 3 2019. 3 pound weight loss in almost 3 months.

I stepped back from the scale and said aloud to myself  as I was picking up quarters ($3.50 to be exact) to go to do laundry in my near empty apartment where my girlfriend sleeps soundly in the next room.  

I said aloud:
“ I am more than that. I am intelligent. I know words. I am compassionate, I am beautiful because I have freckles on my beautiful brown skin.”  

 I started to tear up when unconsciously I said words in which I don’t believe “ I am more than that number on that scale. I am worthy of love. Of receiving it. Of Giving it.” A voice that spoke words as if they didn’t come from me lovingly cascaded out of my mouth because I don’t believe them. But this was a gentle reminder, or rather affirmation from deep within. A truth I push away where instead the lie that I am “fat” beats me over the head daily and rips me apart, tearing my self-esteem and any possibility of self-love away and out of my grip.

So. I am more.

I am more than the names that I was called thought elementary school and the nickname they gave me about my body. The name that the popular girls at the sleepovers branded me with at the parties I used to get invited to. I am more than the hurt that still haunts me from the boy that told me he’s “seen uglier” when I was 11 at a party in a hot tub when it was time to play “who would you date” I am more than the trauma that began when the boy who told me to “sit down Rilen, nobody wants to see your fat” when my pre-pubesent, lanky, tall 5’5, size 6 body rose from my desk and I outstretched my arms above my head to simply stretch and my favorite magenta shirt rolled up, betraying me by exposing my then, non-existent “muffin top. I am more than the permanent message that from that moment forward that my hips were bad, gross, disgusting and the eventual stretch marks that showed up in adulthood were wrong and something to humiliated about. I am more than that debilitating fear that forces me to wear leotards when I perform out of sheer terror that my shirt might fly up and my “fat stomach” and “hips” will fall out mid performance, leading me to be self-conscious and unable to stay in the moment during a scene because that voice will scream at me how disgusting I am and how embarrassed I should be. 

I am more than the deleterious nickname my mom gave my breasts in high school that mocked  the color of my skin and the shape of my body. Goddamnit, I am MORE than any mean word and slur that anyone believed they had the agency or permission to pass judgment about my childhood body and my body now in my adult years.

I deserve nothing but respect and admiration for my body. For its shape, its color, the ripples on my thighs, the scars on my skin that I self- inflicted because I needed to feel something in moments of distress. The freckles that litter my face that seem to multiply every year, my 3 tattoos on my body inked in by a stinging needle with each holding deep meaning and representing a piece of my identity. 

My mind deserves to be respected for its intellect and capabilities. My gifts to express myself through word, song and acting deserve acknowledgment, not my untoned arms and stomach. My mind needs to accept that I am everything I need to be in this moment. Would I like to lose weight to feel more confident in my body? Yes. Does that mean that because of  weight loss I need to do in order to be healthier that was unfairly added to my body as a side effect of psychiatric meds to help with other aspects of my mental health that debilitate me equal me being gross, a failure and lazy because it hasn’t happened yet?  Does that fear that freezes me from making changes cross my mind that even if I lose weight I will still hate myself as much as I do now? Undoubtedly. But when all is said and done, I am enough. I am all that I need to be. A number on a piece of glass with batteries and a number on a size of pants or shirt has absolutely no merit or any standing in who I am as a human. 

I am more. So, so much more.",5.446618647458983,5.74478505042017,5.710612244897959,83.21176870748302,67.64345738295319,8.742216886754703,30.378951580632247,8.554587454381133,2.084660824329732,3309,117,678,46,51,1054,363,833,0.1,0.815,0.086,-0.8623,1,0,2,0,0,0,84.0,0,2,4,12,28,34,4,5,39,1,60,43,32,7,5,91,99,53,0,12,12,1,14,1,1,7,4,10,1,6,47,35,11,1,11,3,0,11,6,22,0,2,26,31,117,12,122,58,23,103,0,7,7,3,38,59,0,9,32,471,164,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04882975266233692,0.0,0.0551599233023103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11237958190393273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03851688932422299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350881598583436,0.042357158941129285,0.04599388490145038,0.20147675174401766,0.0,0.0,0.18618664825630926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5506856767346693,0.0,0.0,0.056248201674190326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058272893071382,0.047451067422895635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03552543075509819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641095130213928,0.05637133846984905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05691779101956815,0.0,0.036383289736258685,0.0,0.046411701014979934,0.0,0.049507073004102696,0.0,0.0,0.12397244728521288,0.055705517552810405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028779770856582693,0.05284279359357759,0.03130621841988592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0487117068390048,0.0,0.0,0.05438528248089433,0.11306672226365375,0.0585530474750274,0.0,0.0,0.03692248358458427,0.05820059362672118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05896990207139104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030273414154714167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02691187189416137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0462577385009954,0.12325261450819372,0.0,0.0,0.09943318205535756,0.0,0.036769833768946256,0.0,0.0,0.18001196621085444,0.06118729741496326,0.0,0.05551297830195796,0.058436747822353065,0.16686120586872485,0.06451518193245195,0.04396852297905609,0.0,0.0809879975143669,0.20422508362583466,0.0,0.0,0.05858379093236199,0.0,0.0,0.05285578540420165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210034545072185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095947579864203,0.0,0.0,0.11149843272554327,0.0438958143083738,0.05014754499296417,0.2298637279011644,0.0,0.0,0.045567090079995334,0.0,0.05512503438238366,0.0,0.0,0.08481463714952349,0.0,0.0,0.0389896252218042,0.058713549808918436,0.08798230756105971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04373153738022783,0.03212065370019362,0.0,0.0,0.10527263872694692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05381028746474567,0.0,0.0,0.047575971749510414,0.0,0.0,0.032490709117567663,0.0,0.04418606684169917,0.4024739847436714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078261965765777,0.06022707615014885,0.0,0.07094619310183539
mentalhealth,Mistress_Tunali,2020/02/25,"Advice I need advice and a platform to vent. I've been bulimic throughout high school, but slowly recovered on my own. My digestive system has weakened, indeed, and my self image has worsened again. I became sensitive to greasy and acidic foods and my medication has made me less hungry, to the point I rarely get an appetite daily. I wish to eat regularly, but my parents (I'm 20 years old) Keep making light out of it, calling me a pig, laughing at me, making jokes saying ""Oh well she's going to lock herself in the bathroom and throw up"" and it's making me feel awful. Despite telling them to stop, they just make it seem as if I'm making a big deal of nothing, when it's making me feel worse.",7.1613347236704925,6.16392254744526,7.546506777893635,75.81671532846717,64.4014598540146,9.580396246089675,33.440041710114706,8.418075326091056,2.608948696558916,547,19,102,6,7,180,94,137,0.122,0.789,0.08900000000000001,-0.6956,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,0,4,3,0,0,6,1,4,4,0,7,0,25,21,11,0,3,4,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,4,7,3,2,3,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,5,18,3,14,19,2,17,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,2,5,61,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972501187092814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15530556725133002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15680282936750656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15563072166273634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538071750752141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18391336497706245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946313846858129,0.0,0.08643885254069157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069627007665907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13518864743961348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439155652692553,0.6091458629345249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532192841218606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127762008932426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14593884764996395,0.0,0.15959767241170733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688830274274412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14377853559660478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120951711435113,0.0,0.15392783081650427,0.0,0.13846118968399898,0.15866781332396074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715787584941673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293736323152355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675128961506738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749012562613239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499736670951247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794392030366676
mentalhealth,King_Wobblelede,2020/02/25,"Something is wrong with me mentally, and I don’t know what it is. I’ve got this strong feeling in my gut that it’s true. I don’t understand myself, and I really want to. I am currently diagnosed with ADHD, Anxiety, and depression. However this just doesn't feel right! I feel like I’m special, not sure if that’s in a good or bad way. I feel as though I have a much larger role in this world, a big purpose that I don’t know what it is. I am known to be an extremely empathetic, nice, and caring person. I tend to hold the doors open for people I don’t even know. I am currently 16 years old. I have very weird and random tics that make no sense, it’s hard to control them. I need help, I don’t think anyone understands me and how I operate. I’ve thought about ideas that I can’t explain why I think that way, such as my brain is always becoming weaker(a lot of experience and things I’ve noticed about myself has led me to this conclusion), or my brain can’t keep up with my age. I often make weird and often bad choices, such as deciding to put a balloon on the faucet in my school bathroom and letting the water run for no reason until I stop it and decide to release it with water spraying everywhere. Something is wrong with me, and I know it! Please, someone help me. I am desperate.",2.77752380952381,4.197977422641511,4.3819946091644235,86.12176100628929,74.77358490566039,7.9155435759209345,25.826594788858944,8.563005593585519,1.7069424977538183,1007,35,213,19,21,338,141,265,0.133,0.737,0.13,0.3768,3,0,2,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,1,3,10,15,0,0,8,0,22,6,3,6,2,58,45,20,0,3,5,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,20,17,2,4,20,0,0,3,11,7,0,0,2,5,35,8,27,41,2,22,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,7,8,139,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330715315510695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992198942340626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122072112098026,0.0,0.0,0.08337761752911703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19912618133363355,0.0,0.13169474522146066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662296931402469,0.0,0.0,0.12157638888159145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337413875278577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10270399287275644,0.12102933729224072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875900856233081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664272994187992,0.0,0.0,0.2411717777976837,0.08518736544269671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001553816084324,0.09536967959503748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10681848486772813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15985240597321645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461105773583995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059888344777549,0.0,0.0,0.26213177553826106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193425031093652,0.0,0.05825620399653721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137630391156363,0.0,0.0,0.1591915230116138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016909864660252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765747182178744,0.08841732139411437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575917280039385,0.1251256788543232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266822031139334,0.10411856224920173,0.0,0.1308932248273365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987235054100988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639024690125612,0.12260186886024617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183304071248936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068048383439745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103437585179796,0.18359848111297264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969265401495216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238530420357908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921988313446754,0.15281245463028287,0.11715583793214955,0.09466578069054586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482727517245997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838812762315384,0.07033272846233413,0.18929940266246176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759844032161413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607474387598625,0.0,0.07678871084056635
mentalhealth,jaked111,2020/02/25,I feel like I can’t be emotional with anyone Over the past few years I’ve realized any time I open up to someone they end up ghosting me or no longer being part of my life soon after. I’m at the point I feel like I can’t tell anything in my head to anyone because it will just drive them away. I’ve got a few great friends but we have just never shared much on the emotional side. I feel like if I went to them for support I’d end up pushing them away as well but I really have no other options,2.1915825688073407,3.0117079174311967,3.797144495412845,92.10654243119266,75.3302752293578,6.917889908256881,23.716743119266056,7.1686216300943375,0.6620908256880735,389,11,92,4,8,130,73,109,0.063,0.747,0.18899999999999997,0.8956,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,0,4,0,5,8,0,0,4,0,7,2,1,0,1,15,14,5,1,1,6,0,3,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,3,5,0,1,0,2,3,16,8,17,9,4,23,0,0,0,0,8,12,0,3,11,61,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103758129160718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22698071472415954,0.0,0.13356663118562376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049896479820435,0.0,0.0,0.09894217383921997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3651519781025798,0.28751552736151753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24620520523702485,0.3478611466722292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539967517915315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981348399608644,0.17894645156694924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657605196833933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146437787654725,0.2378882105074433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931592791119235,0.0,0.12518285098680906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17576503250569428,0.15494248457023133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15343464459283854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397942129701047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375240473532473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18418654185140024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186538342389104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464379214149124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459354515792946,0.15046224236913036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452179485250848
mentalhealth,chaser4000,2020/02/25,"Ever feel like completely disconnecting Recently I've been feeling really down and anxious and it's been spiralling out of control, I feel like chucking my phone and moving away from all family and friends go get some space and try clear my head and spare them the annoyance of me. Has anyone had this before.",5.0931578947368426,7.59895129824562,5.21038596491228,78.01136842105265,71.10526315789474,8.770526315789473,28.94385964912281,9.3871,2.93388701754386,252,10,42,6,5,79,46,57,0.07200000000000001,0.737,0.191,0.7675,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,1,1,4,1,0,1,0,4,1,1,1,3,15,9,6,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,3,5,3,6,6,2,8,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26660739317356985,0.0,0.1650133251444485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22172525101664528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008145262041542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24743646842049866,0.0,0.264688674483858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21347116180287573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224752636281495,0.0,0.3579787792403893,0.3371900240993497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18232929963669134,0.0,0.12329774728078477,0.0,0.13412150591078326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24219915121982316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23059066009903334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508255407114191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118456275606135,0.0,0.23301678105584497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160225243980917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tyuirara1,2020/02/25,"Struggling with stress-caused bad anxiety, panic attacks, paranoia, and depression. Since about August September last year, especially October (I made myself sick), I've been struggling with anxiety, panic attacks, paranoia, depression and insomnia, mostly due to stress of overworking myself, over stimulating my mind, and a poor lifestyle.

Personal context: I'm almost 19.
I've never had panic attacks or paranoia until last year, or anything close, I've never really had any mental illnesses, and haven't had serious anxiety, and any that I have, hasn't been very impeding on my life. 

Symptoms:
Psychological:
-Paranoia and anxiety > Thinking things are going to explode, thinking a bomb is gonna go off while walking, in the truck next to me. Just being in edge all the time, feeling like I'm in a constant low level flight response.

-Intellectual issues > I can't remember very well, I forget a lot, can't concentrate well or think straight, can't do intellectual tasks very well compared to how I used to be able to. Until I went down hill in September last year, I would consider myself, without intending on being egotistical, very intelligent, I could remember complex details very well, and understanding dense philosophical topics, and am now worried for my intellectual health, as anyone obviously should. 

-Depression > Just a general feeling of emptyness, no will to live (sometimes, while other times I feel a great will to live and to pull myself together) and blankness when trying to navigate through the next situation. I suppose nihilism too, it's always been my philosophical position, but until recently it's never taken over my instinctive experience of meaning. It sometimes takes over me now, and leaves me feeling soo meaningless.

Physical:

-Breathing > My breathing is shallow, not very replenishing or full and it seems like my breathing is coming from the diaphragm, far more than from the lungs. I can literally watch my diaphragm go up and down, but feel little to no oxygen or lung movement. When exercising I get out of breath far far too quickly, and feel as though I can't breath, although I know this is not  an actual problem, as during my progression, I've been able to exercise no problem. It's just certain periods of tension. I've also been virtually unable to yawn, many times, and it's been days sometimes without yawning, although this is better now.

-Palpotations > This is often just a fluttery feeling, with faster rates than usual, and sometimes stabbing pains and beat skips. It's much better today, but in December, it was absolutely terrifying, I had a panic attack that lasted 15 hours, and my heart rate was about 1.8x my normal rate for the whole night and I could not sleep one bit, I had palpotations every  couple seconds, without a break. I also had the shakes very badly (as though it was -10c while unclothed), and could barely breath, my lungs felt like they were being squeezed. It was very scary, I called a non emergency line for advice and help, as I was just unable to cope. I still get shakes, and palpations, but not very badly anymore. Although the shakes can get bad.

-Adrenaline rushes > At times, a whole week, would go, with almost no break from adrenaline of some form being felt somewhere. Anything even slightly negative would make me pump adrenalin down my chest, stomach, and legs, which was very uncomfortable, especially after months of having it over and over. It actually started to hurt my adrenal glands, making them sore, near my kidneys. It's somewhat better now, but still is present a lot more than is healthy.

-Muscle spasms, twitches.

-Light flickers in my vision

-Back, shoulder and neck pain.

Causes: 

-Seeing anything exciting, frustrating, sad or tense > Even just thinking about the word tense made a little adrenaline rush down my feet as I type this. Things like talking with someone on a forum about a controversial subject, made my heart rate almost double within 20 seconds, and turned my hands to an electronic toothbrush!! 

-The cycle > My symptoms, make me more stressed, and cause more symptoms, and so on.

Progress: I've meditated as best as I can, gone for many long walks and exercised to get away from things and get fresh air, and to clear my mind, avoided social media largely, spent time with family, written things down, looked at positive and happy things, like past vacations, memories, and watched comedic, or happy movies. I've talked to family, quite a lot, organised some counselling, and made goals for the future. 

Extra: 
I've included physical symptoms, as they are just helpful insights to my life and the extent of my situation, symptomatically.",8.733776683087031,9.54674895812808,7.995431034482759,67.86975574712646,60.65024630541872,10.707553366174057,38.714696223316906,10.504223727775694,4.403712972085387,3742,177,567,80,48,1169,389,812,0.17600000000000002,0.711,0.114,-0.9918,0,1,0,0,0,0,170.0,0,0,3,9,36,52,5,13,30,0,56,40,20,13,7,138,104,73,0,10,26,0,11,5,0,7,20,0,0,1,26,44,0,1,21,4,2,16,21,33,4,3,30,16,58,19,95,59,22,109,0,6,4,0,10,39,0,19,57,385,84,2,0.09082052846527787,0.0,0.08862773476337729,0.0,0.0,0.044374384649486766,0.0,0.0,0.1364154603897295,0.0,0.0,0.07262914380112953,0.03778497758197759,0.0,0.0,0.061761073725013285,0.0,0.13895491137843918,0.0,0.04503478001678092,0.031751912592694914,0.0,0.11210633477457906,0.0,0.0,0.20664292481289,0.04266443806105382,0.034917690186569976,0.1516626953849974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047655270721488924,0.1204850654633658,0.04957624738671956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04636895695343632,0.0,0.0,0.1399465505996952,0.0,0.03911692173683212,0.0,0.04907236334356425,0.0,0.10876920276879504,0.0502455936563853,0.0,0.029285863732622926,0.0,0.11733538212977974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059986102502512226,0.0,0.03826010614463505,0.0,0.0,0.04441995196605985,0.0856175114170216,0.0,0.16072555815257866,0.032441101841197084,0.08720194988743113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862494411007796,0.0,0.10323079857343444,0.0,0.0,0.05006497662880001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966801413521529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04826898739960722,0.0,0.10762276351514967,0.06087508581569925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04471996306799835,0.0,0.04861262705846403,0.0,0.0,0.047396517901839234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024956293641252618,0.14806170470732435,0.0,0.048082913097822005,0.0,0.0,0.06414922513714476,0.11092580671511074,0.09102602893112802,0.08019619054405545,0.040186654868205315,0.038133185088123,0.0,0.0,0.11581854829252032,0.0,0.1718731599647122,0.0909351119753014,0.09207776101818478,0.0,0.04946509022447305,0.0,0.0,0.045762865738366486,0.0,0.09170284372754277,0.0,0.036246039671300745,0.0,0.03338176918295889,0.0,0.10506958569060597,0.0,0.0965886623592543,0.04261445680666928,0.04449241743597078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030771170270911637,0.0,0.09663944561042144,0.2131166435559708,0.0,0.0,0.043349235488554176,0.0,0.03965049117239662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690298016098562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04829940567132174,0.0,0.0,0.029090978063699462,0.0,0.044837157594634594,0.0,0.10288195434722584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03618610130668355,0.04133979906714482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037563839829961525,0.10208607922594767,0.04544305898238726,0.04629004573575485,0.038475969522437696,0.0,0.17964764985411896,0.0,0.032141618749209164,0.0,0.07252939135003017,0.0,0.15605191275966093,0.0949453356027474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887946072693812,0.03414286732583164,0.07299810055991607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084280886358378,0.11638825493667908,0.08923070809612606,0.0,0.13239545126861624,0.0,0.04304362080971258,0.0,0.0,0.030830588605931433,0.049393327599478204,0.0,0.047273686545159406,0.0,0.039219888288147764,0.05001299053844429,0.3746822373952252,0.0,0.0,0.03642537486250935,0.0,0.1633171243945515,0.04209576988962575,0.0,0.10139787664342867,0.0,0.13132162275361758,0.0,0.0,0.046116327594925885,0.0,0.09677444648020893,0.0,0.0,0.08772816399547248
mentalhealth,itskabitch,2020/02/25,"I'm researching mental health in Teenagers for the Welsh Baccalaureate I'm chilling here because I need the ops of y'all as fellow teens, if y'all could fill [this beautiful set of questions](https://forms.office.com/Pages/ResponsePage.aspx?id=Ug4_TzS3ZEGUCRtgHRR5kzDa027MwnBKmijPq1lgKZ1UOVU3VVhJUzNRSzEyNUtQWVMyVDRUMEZHQS4u) I'd be forever grateful... Love y'all and have a great day/night",13.538333333333336,18.37203098148148,7.633111111111113,59.573000000000036,54.0,9.505185185185187,31.170370370370367,9.888512548439397,3.5377970370370377,339,11,42,7,5,87,44,54,0.022000000000000002,0.736,0.243,0.9201,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,4,7,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,5,5,0,3,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,1,0,19,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298951396282442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30110786915614224,0.0,0.0,0.2432178539638181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4157875036767735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4008718894386383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34037483343994496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38005865552536894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796373499731797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3539112531212901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExpensiveSoil,2020/02/25,"What do I tell my boss/coworkers when I miss a day of work for mental health reasons? I called out of work today because I woke up this morning feeling really depressed and didn't think I would be able to perform my best at work. I'm bipolar and worried that I may be at the start of a depressive episode. Thankfully I'm going to see my psychiatrist before work tomorrow morning so hopefully I can get my meds adjusted before things get a lot worse. All I told my boss when I emailed him this morning was that I wasn't feeling well, but I know that when I go in tomorrow I'll most likely have to explain myself to him and probably to my coworkers. I'm just wondering what I should say, if anything.",7.2141945288753835,5.916119375886527,7.831671732522796,74.79000000000002,64.46099290780143,11.461398176291794,38.58257345491389,10.608840637214634,4.00345309017224,556,26,109,12,7,186,86,141,0.083,0.845,0.073,-0.0536,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,6,6,8,0,0,4,0,11,2,0,2,1,23,31,9,0,4,3,0,2,1,0,3,2,1,0,0,8,4,0,0,8,0,0,2,2,3,1,0,5,4,22,5,14,21,4,15,0,3,1,0,8,5,0,6,9,74,30,5,0.15575549615462414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817350210689893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494710478561058,0.0,0.2650729105864585,0.0,0.16345578386380355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15904377608232154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044940968902873,0.0,0.2683039612144271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750931756960107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275163633951853,0.0,0.17703887570298066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16556080895700656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15470035178957334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559914732845636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609426790714788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241775296140992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730092436646404,0.0,0.1569649060401977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679307684633893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978095918407036,0.16014259108820622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238630221100135,0.0,0.0,0.1241169647031682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102445418473821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13613716884053048,0.14339873444830886,0.0,0.0,0.103477030723894,0.09980183280459544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476379983424439,0.14883105133089294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14004289652611418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16891019149505385,0.4535674249582899,0.15817726689672348,0.15872815714586733,0.11064423562474472,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cricks992,2020/02/25,"Someone you know is suffering Context: I have a friend in work, she is also a direct report into me, I'm her manager. We recently were to having our 1-2-1 meeting, when I walked into the room I knew something was wrong right away and directly asked her is she ok, she looks like shes on the verge of crying. This woman completely broke down, told me how shes not dealing well with dark thoughts and tried something stupid on the weekend. We put everything work related aside and completely focused on her. After chatting for 40 mins i told her to take the week off work and focus on herself she said the only reason shes here is because she wont get paid if shes out, I agreed to pay her for these days and not worry about work.
I rang her later that day twice to check in, I rang her parents also and informed HR so they could also reach out (don't know company policy on this). 

Question: I checked in with her again today and we text back and forth a little but I just want to know, should I back off and leave her alone incase I'm triggering her thinking about work and not helping, but I want to make sure shes ok and when I text today it was nothing to do with work just wanted to make sure she was ok and how was she feeling etc, but should I keep doing this or should I wait till the end of the week for our scheduled phone call?? 
I don't want to be a trigger for her but I want to be there as her friend so I'm struggling to know what to do.",3.7395394736842102,4.186055980263163,4.6610263157894725,88.71818421052633,71.43421052631578,7.527368421052632,26.055263157894736,7.365786028017652,1.0853873684210518,1134,33,250,11,20,369,156,304,0.077,0.81,0.113,0.7632,1,1,2,0,0,0,25.0,5,1,1,6,19,14,1,1,11,3,28,0,0,7,2,63,56,29,0,10,11,1,1,1,2,4,0,3,1,1,7,22,0,2,11,2,4,2,6,5,1,1,11,5,50,9,42,38,1,41,0,2,1,0,48,20,0,3,20,173,57,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510178849315736,0.0,0.2434585039579021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486930079796077,0.0,0.09534299611177294,0.1560623953338436,0.0,0.06186074417974024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10362155189274856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21279790315587813,0.0,0.0,0.08102283891036374,0.0,0.11147007439715252,0.1308913052127241,0.10462054134827373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988040082238283,0.0,0.11317607016395093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120291105602824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051310904224513135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15680506957701731,0.0,0.05301866425082867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801933101666986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019932571576522,0.0,0.0,0.22308113414710612,0.0,0.0,0.10745176087794754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04957758376284988,0.10170876163927496,0.0,0.0,0.08521692263668419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13547623300194864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737197540675514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717946170349346,0.0,0.0,0.11268057996953235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201456827070082,0.11367986567595287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043374611785912,0.10019841199105213,0.0,0.0,0.08666263435305943,0.0965299042667152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598294924979166,0.15624720547620066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608803460916984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912857841955338,0.0,0.07629968692036111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06502373781417231,0.0,0.08056310486587981,0.0,0.0,0.1923807254005908,0.19393534143396995,0.0,0.06889767739053597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992751413067019,0.0,0.16280089609600815,0.0,0.09124193745299647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44326815188777424,0.10305699646811807,0.0,0.0,0.11095151330864307,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vendezi,2020/02/25,"Just tired of being so sick I am disgusting 
I feel like a dirty animal that is waiting to be put down. I am so over feeling like this. 
I was mistreated at the doctor today and it has only made me feel more isolated, revolting and alone. 
I just want to see myself disappear because I can’t even feel good about the way I look. I feel even worse. I’m in constant pain, something is always infected or healing from infection, and my stomach churns every time I catch my own reflection. 
A year ago I was beautiful. 
I have continually deteriorated into what I am. My face is covered in deep, painful cystic acne. I continually get infections no matter how hard I work to stay healthy. I feel like I’m losing. I had to reschedule my interview because of my stupid body. I want my body gone. 
My mental health is also obviously fucked. I endured so much trauma as a child due to my next door neighbor. Me molested me, killed two of my pets in front of me, and has stolen years of my life. Because of him I now hate myself.",2.8478055555555533,4.9087485250000045,4.732333333333333,80.92422222222223,76.25,7.844444444444445,26.61111111111111,8.680891452615391,2.1199777777777777,795,31,154,17,18,271,127,200,0.278,0.625,0.09699999999999999,-0.9921,0,1,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,11,14,6,0,5,0,16,16,4,2,1,22,34,11,1,2,3,0,7,3,1,0,11,0,3,1,4,5,0,1,7,0,0,5,2,10,0,1,5,9,36,4,21,27,3,26,0,1,2,1,4,8,1,1,14,102,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319095268171547,0.0,0.0,0.13225005063109976,0.0,0.1021149748785374,0.10624969081653234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335189534014672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28367329788918483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798932185623786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069782542201122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686782751254226,0.0,0.10758573138373748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873884419423272,0.27366884362150995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11804888266388765,0.06671362240445479,0.0,0.0,0.10710170665340744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11438664673349595,0.12606907879393767,0.0,0.13573026412702038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127190340253898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019239619970984,0.1871510862985368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722883496946127,0.1428543059921676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082493675093048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12868316052406767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386806295976097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13580152971889212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971152619218517,0.27174585970075804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12836538761458208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017537212335066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830327880928827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136102320324118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445803418719145,0.14676277970134974,0.12103676369090645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473619811942005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506316996423621,0.10135569665693084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296104974485243,0.0,0.13012871119395444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644584858307446
mentalhealth,friggintiredmyguy,2020/02/25,"Fake it ‘Til You Make it? I have a (relatively) new job that I feel under qualified for. I really, really like this job but it causes me so much anxiety some days. People tell me that I’m good at what I do, but I honestly find it hard to believe them. I feel like people will see through my facade and realize that I don’t really know what I am doing. 

This job also requires me to be super social, which is pretty hard for me because social anxiety is something I have struggled with for awhile. 

At the end of the day, I like my job. It’s one that I feel fortunate to have. But sometimes it causes me so much anxiety that it effects the rest of my day. It makes it hard for me to be productive because I spend the whole day before my shift (I work evenings) being stressed and anxious. 

Thank you for reading, and any suggestions are greatly appreciated.",3.093546218487397,4.7977774470588255,4.8327731092437,82.04176470588239,74.52941176470588,8.151260504201678,26.84873949579832,8.841846274778883,2.136344537815126,666,25,131,14,14,226,92,170,0.11699999999999999,0.6809999999999999,0.20199999999999999,0.9744,4,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,1,4,4,11,0,2,5,0,14,0,0,5,0,20,23,10,0,0,3,0,6,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,19,4,0,1,7,1,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,7,26,8,17,19,5,10,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,1,10,97,45,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976970797707264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633676045839151,0.0,0.2576226531854385,0.12681538564429262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685833560909222,0.0,0.09552012523139712,0.1264721342409203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306321369491875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2895788987773269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942397414981316,0.0,0.0,0.07414289391980304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702774120456894,0.08019448079170234,0.0,0.0,0.10259837919649213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415356505310432,0.0,0.1237607411193644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30167336042406645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44558021117915736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061692017146716814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645253145740401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986120850214865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16503962538881845,0.0,0.0,0.10841588411190936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606640598424777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15564596865730665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420295994204124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228465862483873,0.0,0.21573890057383102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945212836390971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288582059743033,0.0,0.08641882977883718,0.11102235426545704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12858689964326694,0.11735254754182076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811518942109236,0.10334866012691732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532789592976395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172245352617231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clarencedesmond,2020/02/25,"Do I deserve to feel unhappy when there are starving children? This has been a thought of mine for a while and has stopped me from speaking to someone about my mental state. While with a group of friends (none know I am depressed) one said “How can people be depressed when they’ve got money, phones and food etc”

That was a few years ago. Ever since then, whenever I get these awful feelings I think back to what he said. How can I be wanting to die and hating life when I have money to buy food every day, electronics and a loving family?

I’m sorry if this sounds dramatic or sounds like I’m looking for attention, I have never truly opened up to anyone before for fear of getting called “gay” or a “pussy” by my male friendship group. I just need anonymous opinions.",5.144496644295302,6.088035295302018,5.188785234899331,84.40009060402684,68.53020134228188,7.570738255033557,29.66510067114094,7.554174236665415,1.786682684563759,605,22,115,6,10,189,105,149,0.17800000000000002,0.7440000000000001,0.078,-0.9308,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,10,7,1,1,6,1,13,5,0,2,2,24,30,15,1,3,4,0,2,1,1,0,1,5,0,2,5,6,2,1,6,0,3,0,2,4,0,1,6,8,12,3,17,22,3,16,0,2,1,2,12,2,0,4,14,77,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450300991460446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398391628944095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534851447538656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13871380462469352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16645659666577556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10513122415596657,0.0,0.28080925488453645,0.0,0.1691838896560635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18180487668238293,0.0,0.14745644944642394,0.13734721407045386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367608527168347,0.1834372570251674,0.16485061906612355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3942369015772714,0.0,0.12594502661350807,0.0,0.17033727539793694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130378030671305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16094361705843474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958881065809247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151423538144134,0.07964092134634318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13689158926238587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14712745108238642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16428083323355386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208735972433351,0.12572725947307314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046321968947063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301411317588066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101292935149523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484773750836596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812212654583886,0.0,0.0,0.1824820071043396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13628788476648673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10445346456727077,0.0,0.12941574419462815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615050262930644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497635034208794
mentalhealth,Dextrolymphocyte,2020/02/25,"Is there something wrong with me? I think there is something wrong with me. For a few months I have been suffering with constant thoughts. These thoughts are usually from what music I listen to. However, one day a song was stuck in my head. Of course I thought this was normal and usually I was focus hard on reality or meditate but this was different because even if I was trying to focus hard it would keep ringing in my head and if I mediated it would go away...but then when I'm finished it would come back. When I would wake up I immediately would have the thoughts. It's like a never ending music playlist is ringing in my head with no stop button and I can't stop thinking. I can only stop the thoughts for 3 seconds...then it would continue on and on. Even in my dreams I would think too much in my dreams and I can't stop it. I want it to stop it's annoying.",2.6611553030303017,4.42856719886364,3.870090909090912,88.21430303030306,75.875,7.1933333333333325,26.50606060606061,8.021203637495839,1.5181769696969694,681,26,145,11,15,222,90,176,0.182,0.759,0.059000000000000004,-0.9411,2,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,1,0,5,0,22,4,4,0,1,38,37,12,0,11,4,0,2,1,0,7,0,4,0,0,12,10,0,6,8,3,0,2,4,4,0,1,12,6,21,1,20,18,2,29,0,1,0,0,1,9,0,3,19,103,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392089140504484,0.0768673100401509,0.0,0.06093804970770394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611143906986926,0.0,0.1080272076239309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644694868217533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444268593140264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853977438662165,0.0,0.0,0.13205255887556813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056812705517163165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17909893127757276,0.0,0.30778037335589725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885394230140604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04883810086329109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979151983578471,0.0,0.073486155234351,0.0,0.07709956735317272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794497938474707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06773921965841195,0.07602827828963675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539166736554854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4178782308233489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19216159551464576,0.0,0.39680726072899336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787002234196954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22019578209284574,0.0,0.058962250386896335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4970884327560246,0.21859319420736587,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatoneworgen,2020/02/25,"getting over the "" fat"" mindset after losing weight. general bio male, 5'8 160 pounds 25  
so I've been working to lose weight, and currently, I'm sitting at \~160 down from my worst of 270, I went from wearing a 3XL shirt and size 46 pants, to being a medium wearing size 32 pants, I know I look better, I know I feel better physically, but I still have that feeling of "" god why am I so fat?"" after I shower and see the bit of flab I have left, even tho I know its nothing compared to the pot-belly I had before that stuck out so far I couldn't see my groin when I looked down.  it just kills my mood like, I worked my ass off ( literally) to lose all this weight and I still can't get over that mental hurdle. even with people in my life telling me how much better I look I still can't seem to get that mental image myself.",2.6097300944669364,3.7500199415204714,3.824210526315792,91.07331983805672,74.73099415204679,6.1972109761583445,21.340980656770128,6.297961479604792,0.14251021142600084,634,14,141,4,13,207,106,171,0.128,0.782,0.091,-0.81,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,8,12,10,1,0,5,0,9,10,6,1,1,18,26,11,1,1,2,0,5,1,0,0,3,0,1,1,7,6,5,0,6,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,4,10,24,4,21,20,4,19,0,3,5,1,2,10,1,1,8,86,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012237698368633,0.0,0.0,0.3156237866806532,0.12987039405619086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571401463512789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12029661479592332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18645059739551426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13160845733982066,0.0,0.1961272097153348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129247287446575,0.0,0.08402295036546087,0.058116452892121716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29968212813978523,0.39924785572702864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397616487678848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744718986627084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414259010298786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246990709673095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895868882288632,0.10829411821299008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849979919357722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397378905651206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4345732706117466,0.0,0.11027446633907437,0.10734032187522127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17320443846147648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anuba11,2020/02/25,"I have all these thoughts and am about to explode and do bad things. I want to cause pain. I’ve been out of counseling for 3 months now, and I was ok... hurt, because I got attached to my therapist, but I needed to move on. Now I have no one to talk to about feelings, thoughts, emotions, everyday things. They are building up, and we are going insane. I don’t want one of us to snap.",1.6219710669077756,3.310658430379746,2.851934900542496,94.71670886075951,78.62025316455697,6.033273056057867,25.20976491862568,6.868970318607317,0.7794397830018083,292,11,67,3,7,94,53,79,0.16699999999999998,0.799,0.034,-0.8847,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,2,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,0,1,9,1,0,1,1,15,17,5,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,3,0,2,5,1,11,1,15,12,1,9,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,49,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859676500611746,0.1357722450280635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288018692456659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250537773326006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261740791123072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658082447965713,0.0,0.17813504063195346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238433742573643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777784788694371,0.2367234361723237,0.0,0.16514916696782747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018510101188553,0.0,0.2369971146531865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17901943764873615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25860308626889783,0.29593969825502664,0.0,0.0,0.3536405440674975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679130253476917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627401810637092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LaVerdadEsQue,2020/02/25,Looking for online counselling services Hi Does anyone have any recommendations for online therapists that are knowledgable about LGBT+ issues? Particularly trans issues? Or any online counselling services that have helped you?,10.1771875,15.039034843750002,6.8185,57.57650000000001,75.5625,6.3100000000000005,34.525,7.554174236665415,3.9197675000000003,193,9,17,3,5,54,23,32,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,10,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4308539470724061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22150581333109245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277223661579212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123365853291746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6612895658653316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266022468825802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3678157461304327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gasolinemind,2020/02/25,"At lost in life Hi. I'm a twenty something year old from Portugal. I've always struggled with my mental health and lately I'm in a specially bad place mentally. I broke up with my first girlfriend of plus 3 years last year due not being able to cope with the distance between us (she was and is working in Africa) and then, stupidly, I got myself into another relationship only after a month a half. She was from Spain so we didn't even got to meet physically but it was still very intense and meaningful, at least for me. She broke up with me saying that we where very different and then blocked me on WhatsApp.

I live in my mothers house and I hate it since she has mental problems of her own and gets violent sometimes. But I'm able to save a lot of money, which I need if I want to get out here comfortably. Housing and rent costs are rising so much in this last few years in Portugal that I feel that if I want to live here I need to get a house first. Anyway... my job is pretty good financially and my team is great but I have a shitty boss (disrespects coworkers, hierarchical, incompetent even) and the work is getting boring and so due to all of these things I'm starting to feel depressed. I don't enjoy my work but I'm afraid of leaving because of the lack of decent job opportunities and believing I'm not good professionally.

I had a major depression episode a couple of years ago in college but I got thru it. But I'm starting to feel myself getting there again. I've started to visit a psychologist, but I still feel lost. I keep thinking about the past and the future. Lack of money, failed relationships, how I didn't accomplished anything in life, etc. I have no friends and a pretty bad self esteem. I feel very lost right now and I can't seem to see any reason to live. I have one person I can talk to but I feel that I overwhelm her with my shit.",3.386747095621089,5.039416168900812,4.602163538873995,84.21248570151923,73.63806970509384,7.43982126899017,26.10625558534406,8.131152278815165,1.5754351027703306,1473,51,296,23,30,485,191,373,0.21100000000000002,0.6809999999999999,0.109,-0.9918,4,0,1,0,0,0,36.0,3,0,0,12,16,28,4,3,16,0,19,4,1,3,1,61,55,32,0,9,12,1,6,0,2,0,3,1,1,2,11,25,0,2,10,1,4,2,7,19,0,4,12,8,44,9,50,42,10,47,0,9,1,0,22,18,1,4,27,198,55,11,0.1565687688437766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06939438338053389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.065138879070294,0.0,0.0,0.05323606589281183,0.08208800280756931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644213781173737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072838210270984,0.04772143413419687,0.0,0.0,0.08819969345861922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662018237003051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348524511826804,0.0,0.0,0.08179051973899866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730778217286726,0.10341219518608744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374976216776385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317731479532374,0.0,0.0,0.06048232121153906,0.0,0.20450179895812265,0.0,0.0,0.13132245495123598,0.18783352091040026,0.08630881019328676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728962235044823,0.0,0.08321263989761507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709890068806343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15537034412009193,0.06958275782436497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762444356288544,0.0883081954556641,0.08289185973000006,0.0,0.0,0.11058915172294877,0.0,0.0,0.20737963704280998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25636995963986503,0.0665545841594104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23667674044062825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06248584876895848,0.0,0.057548030066805714,0.1160937582219939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214629259987746,0.0,0.05304752490006461,0.059538801982312324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473130299342738,0.0,0.06835490490772247,0.08179051973899866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15928672540256664,0.0,0.07490758335469587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048938543151503,0.0,0.16809626351218696,0.0,0.06685443655768318,0.0,0.06225488459740156,0.0,0.0,0.06238251887082636,0.07126716342183051,0.08166768614187325,0.0,0.08035779563223568,0.06475765176229313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06026714375695168,0.07742525791977402,0.0,0.1662302706639837,0.0,0.12503602104676367,0.0,0.0,0.08183983595990997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292202283853605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052008666480591284,0.05016147255264623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09416647555750916,0.0,0.0,0.19377844725610696,0.09234831642098236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709758926649597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252062884566664
mentalhealth,jfish3323,2020/02/25,"Crowdsourced Info for Future Website Hello everyone! 

Hope everyone is having a wonderful day. 

I’m in the preliminary stages of starting a website focused around mental health awareness, anxiety, and depression. It’s a topic that’s very close to my heart and in my opinion, there are not enough websites from non-medical sources talking casually to people about tackling everyday activities made more difficult by mental health issues. 

I’m hoping you all could help me out by providing ideas of what you might like to see on a website that isn’t tailored towards diagnosis of mental illness but more about everyday life and living with these issues. For example, interacting with people during a day of high anxiety. Told from the perspective of someone who struggles vs a medical journal or article. 

Any input would be greatly valued and appreciated. I hope that this could potential help bring people together as a stronger community! 

Thank you everyone!",8.75678451178451,10.68205374691358,8.800549943883276,58.197929292929324,60.913580246913575,12.063748597081931,42.505050505050505,11.741389052700956,6.137585185185188,785,45,101,25,11,256,112,162,0.071,0.722,0.207,0.9757,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,0,0,4,10,0,1,9,0,9,6,1,1,1,26,21,7,0,6,4,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,1,7,7,25,14,4,16,0,1,1,0,10,8,0,7,7,70,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164959099442219,0.0,0.18370165860832108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068849727377686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19172725652198175,0.0,0.0,0.15486640056379816,0.0,0.10341342188799724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406117583779078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34418712787505884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132374151495079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25525094310636515,0.0,0.14227982275415832,0.1609565883110341,0.12685724358673894,0.0,0.3577604894111381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13554088516960267,0.0,0.2506372423818576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480678328841422,0.05865860939750477,0.0,0.1060212486976394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361017844767585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333672289043545,0.12095474299907745,0.3629975042441971,0.12737197837641215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24971775598978946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956777527712194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101732271968211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849839507796224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12551996510470007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650520456662552,0.0,0.1105414452815798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147290426250196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906774474940866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13020740219560467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529206178206396,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,time91216,2020/02/25,Long read I’m just trying to grow into a better me (21m) I’ve been trying to better myself since my kid self was so bad I grew up parentless and that hurts me still but I wanted to say me and grandma have never been close she’s more closer with my sister I have tons of mental health issues that she never took seriously when I was a kid. I definitely wasn’t a saint in no regard I had a good heart but I had home and school problems and I took my anger out physically breaking fighting my family anything at that time. I am better now still improving but I still never understood why my grandma feels to use my past to her benefit when my friends in another state and grandpa as well took my mental health seriously and tried to help me so I never understood why my grandma still doesn’t see improvement no physical behaviors or anything see witnessed as me being a kid then. My grandpa says ignore her but her negative actions and comments hurt especially when I’m just trying to improve and grow as a man. I guess for me I want her to see the adult me and not the kid me but I can also see her not letting it go but I never thought she would use it to belittle to others.,2.9193750000000023,4.640508854166671,4.725000000000001,82.56,75.04166666666666,7.633333333333333,25.75,8.395991825355821,1.7784,935,33,184,17,20,318,124,240,0.14400000000000002,0.6859999999999999,0.17,0.6197,1,0,0,0,2,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,14,16,2,0,8,0,15,3,1,2,5,41,34,26,0,4,11,3,1,0,1,1,2,2,1,7,6,13,0,1,4,1,0,8,12,9,1,0,13,7,42,7,22,18,2,35,1,2,4,0,24,8,0,2,17,136,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734620832432422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141838190527032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591831133737652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075638661249163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566204827862613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117813494268634,0.0,0.04890406976473776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472491644763812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05496767849701015,0.08112337024573105,0.0,0.0,0.10654696392676218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20561570519057326,0.0,0.11461256806324607,0.0648287563757424,0.0,0.09701711695006536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20707953765513964,0.0,0.0,0.10094958457781536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989018058144332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559333668602563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19494015551716995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729785610410228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232929987385463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254709137066368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674524729255574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15382977891102034,0.0,0.09788486620736536,0.30829031803272544,0.0,0.10089908755451556,0.0,0.0,0.08000701726307742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3089599088958902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767841409222847,0.056397669690585274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32237534903617765,0.2626636090443707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16706845165615858,0.0,0.0,0.11409483119046375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696206278390754,0.0,0.17454784071723095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870645497740256,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,onthe_strugglebus,2020/02/25,"I am struggling. I try so hard. Work is exhausting. Being a mother is exhausting. Socializing is exhausting. My anxiety is through the roof and my depression makes everything so much harder. I’m just not fit for life. At 29 years old, I can’t fathom doing this for another year, let alone 40-50. I just want to disappear. 

I sit at work thinking about ending it all. Walking out, going home, ending my life.

Then I think of my sweet girl and wonder how badly it would affect her. She has nowhere safe to go. I couldn’t do that to her. 

So here’s to another day in my own personal hell...",0.8300287356321867,3.3350865431034533,2.9897931034482745,87.401183908046,88.74137931034483,6.886436781609198,21.526436781609195,8.021203637495839,1.476634022988506,453,16,91,11,15,153,84,116,0.237,0.728,0.035,-0.9666,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,8,9,1,1,2,0,13,5,0,3,1,17,21,7,0,3,3,1,1,0,0,1,5,0,1,2,4,3,0,1,3,0,0,4,3,7,0,0,0,2,15,2,13,17,3,17,1,1,0,0,7,5,1,1,7,61,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18634638477161994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773307543906637,0.13764091180009713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15022852716590254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603571106698063,0.0,0.1549677644596652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187174641878832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16170355423632918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20450923397450171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16117602967422126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18047784454778928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839838710571052,0.2541704428164991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010026948320845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226440439602274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18879934641466145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710217664568815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18340925237209316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18809500770990556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23057530494445505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221561810218256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612348549739556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19511925692012444,0.2619727623825095,0.0,0.0,0.12781242414391278,0.0,0.0,0.2317295466680691
mentalhealth,ghcuh,2020/02/25,"I feel like I'm completely alone I have friends and family, but it still feels like I have no-one. I don't have a great relationship with my parents (it's not terrible but we still barely talk to each other). I have quite a few friends, but I feel really distanced from them. I'm gay but I'm too afraid to tell them because I had a negative experience with my former best friend. I told him I was gay and from that day onward he distanced himself further and further from me. He even got mad at me if I accidentally touched him. We haven't talked for 2 years now but recently I found out he's told that I'm gay to some people. I'm afraid something similar will happen if I tell any one of my friends. Another problem is that none of my friends consider me to be their best friend or even a very close friend. So when we are somewhere they tell inside jokes, post photos of themselves on social media etc. and I'm just standing right next to them, doing nothing. So I just feel completely distanced from them almost 100% of the time and it's relly destroying me inside. And because I don't know how they would react and if I wouldn't just be annoying them, I can't talk to them about my sexuality and my problems. And I really want to get me being gay off my chest, this is probably the thing that is killing me inside the most. I see everyone getting girlfriends, falling in love, talking about girls but I know I'll never experience any of that. Today I'm on my lowest point mentally and I want to rant here at least. I started smoking weed pretty much every day just to not feel like shit and I know I can't continue on like this for long. I don't know what to do.

TL:DR I'm gay and feel distanced from everyone. I'm afraid to talk to anyone about it and I started smoking weed every day just to not feel like shit.",2.5514516129032287,4.3357369274193545,3.9792338709677435,87.23885080645167,76.23118279569891,7.123118279569893,25.33467741935484,7.972316293177498,1.40611935483871,1435,51,300,23,32,474,169,372,0.10800000000000001,0.6859999999999999,0.20600000000000002,0.9914,2,1,1,0,0,0,33.0,3,0,9,3,19,29,6,3,7,0,24,9,3,2,1,63,57,27,1,9,18,1,8,5,8,3,0,0,0,1,14,21,0,0,12,1,0,1,13,12,0,1,6,9,54,17,38,45,10,34,0,0,1,6,41,13,2,7,23,192,68,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812147430616913,0.080800757685994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610672984599552,0.08180628481298198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05455040543121673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511531768211297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637453700593583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635959963716998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15094105610370315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700815040617334,0.1030572946495012,0.0,0.1314632179046376,0.14909472764088047,0.0,0.15262868854969205,0.07354627766399308,0.0,0.27612964525478445,0.2229377840350742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855402102562963,0.42192326261684016,0.0,0.08151998751658135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06239629821441872,0.08601260680069271,0.0,0.0,0.06898904361010183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631283527072915,0.0,0.1715015978601598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905727005083223,0.0,0.0,0.06904145725348633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041223330338556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862149634087134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057350530857805865,0.0,0.06017053283724792,0.0,0.08297060336718805,0.0,0.0,0.07485818750610525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05286547098449183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662722460358714,0.0,0.0,0.05408627720369704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375007237866545,0.0,0.07471749429349787,0.07937003447237033,0.0841141413793659,0.14930101571435442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829793214429414,0.0,0.0,0.0999577359715042,0.0,0.07703111168595858,0.08375968679072326,0.0,0.06662499867209534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062168428169231474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16016403107879984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795272018636114,0.0,0.06006031281579069,0.0,0.0,0.1104398564254264,0.0,0.1246069096553823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135304030605308,0.20456753407882086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051830177825477816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045491593760644926,0.0,0.07394978049094242,0.14909472764088047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437113952778799,0.09203138603388764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055420129159836615,0.0,0.0,0.05023956588146135
mentalhealth,dl57,2020/02/25,"My wife thinks she is ugly I need advice how to behave and act so I can help her feel better. I love her and her appearance is solid 6-8/10 range. Everyone around compliments her and thinks she is beautiful, which is true, she got pretty face, great body and all is nice. The problem is she has been heavily abused by her mom during her childhood so her self esteem is problematic in that sense. She has been telling her she is ugly and fat and this stuff, but later her mom would tell her she is great and pretty. This kind of bipolar evaluation left her in an eternal doubt about herself. She doesn't know if she is ugly or pretty, good or bad. She is so called a ""reversed narcissist"" person which is constantly seeking an evaluation of herself from others. Sometimes she is feeling so down, she starts telling shit about herself how ugly and useless she is, which makes me super sad and confused because she is hands down incredibly smart and pretty . Complimenting her and telling all that doesn't help a lot, she kinda likes it and it improves her overall mood, but it is extremely ineffective and doesn't change anything in a long perspective. She might start telling how ugly she is in a 5 minutes after I've  complimented her. I know a little about psychology and this thing is as I know a basic trauma which is very hardly cured, but this still makes me sad and annoyed coz these things she thinks of herself is simply untrue and nonsense, but there is no way to make her change her mind. Any advise or questions are welcome",8.083632183908044,7.445295041379312,7.534137931034486,75.48132183908045,62.3793103448276,10.078160919540233,34.50574712643678,9.21078282632365,2.956464367816092,1222,44,222,17,15,383,152,290,0.18,0.614,0.207,0.8429,0,0,0,0,1,0,27.0,0,0,0,3,13,27,2,2,9,0,32,7,5,7,3,54,49,32,0,4,8,3,4,1,0,2,2,1,0,2,18,17,1,0,9,0,0,2,4,11,0,0,3,5,46,15,19,44,3,21,0,3,0,1,55,9,1,11,10,161,64,1,0.0,0.11939338890251835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846914736077593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06852557300598444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829233298008275,0.08970472372709097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413692053964353,0.0614271277163389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912094788918665,0.0,0.11193033142707974,0.0,0.0,0.10289521063288044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21319798423061248,0.0,0.0,0.10889421488518276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628797022197648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019024749486367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845192664330696,0.08059323088745049,0.2221937543569804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026817381108623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508509116543435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493417785318908,0.16613807552829168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948453116113943,0.0,0.0,0.049230066822659686,0.10099582819329493,0.0,0.08917634963079361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566919698539212,0.09094689169572316,0.0,0.20178990676929154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068987327045614,0.10174677241990844,0.2360361055597713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471806162948004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798657353836739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4100683980831723,0.0,0.0964211946504328,0.0,0.0,0.11288302008400332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512281279786304,0.0,0.10343671905215417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996619505049684,0.0,0.14264796314494296,0.0,0.08047331113712823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535504529278663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4403775805586972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389132393950512,0.1937038504919746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314400467514399,0.0,0.0799848050785844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158256808508731,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnxzityBoi,2020/02/25,"I have extreme anxiety and get sick as a defense mechanism only before matches. I want to start by saying that this may seem stupid, but it causes me so much stress and pain.

So I don't want to self diagnose myself however I'm pretty confident that I have anxiety, of some sort.

When it comes to social situations, I'm completely fine, I don't have stage fright and I'm not awkward around strangers,like I'm fine. **BUT** , I get extremely anxious and nervous to the point where I vomit only before soccer / football matches. I know everyone is is different when it comes to anxiety, what triggers it etc. However I feel so alone when it comes to this, none of my friends get vomit from anxiety, and definitely not before matches. Before anyone says anything, I understand nerves are completely normal before matches. It prepares your body I suppose, however I feel that my body thinks that it is in danger and therefore I get sick, start breathing heavy and find it hard to breath through my nose. I've never been to a doctor, and tbh I'm really unsure about what I should do.

**eg.( today I have training as usual, however instead of regular training with my team ""B Team"" we're having a match against the other team ""A Team"". If training was on as usual I'd be fine however as we're playing another team for training I'm extremely nervous and not going.)**

Extra info? : One of my goals in life is to become a professional soccer player. I'm not anything special, I've never been scouted, however I've been the hardest worker on every team for years. Even though I put in extra work by myself, gym , extra training etc. I still lack greatly mentally. I'm scared before games but once the game starts its fine. A friend of mine who is a great footballer mentally and technically is miles ahead of me just by being extremely well off mentally. He literally doesn't care about his diet,has done narcotics before games and it doesn't affect his game at all. His idgaf attitude is what I strive to have. Every game he just plays, he doesn't care about who or what or when he just plays without stress.

If someone has been or is going through something similar it would really help if you could share your story/stories. Would anyone know if there are specific medications I could take, should I even take meds? 

Any help would be greatly appreciated, thanks for taking your time to read this.",4.30445263157895,6.435287784444448,5.2337543859649145,78.63126315789476,72.26666666666667,8.114619883040936,28.953216374269005,8.841846274778883,2.574844444444445,1893,77,328,38,38,618,215,450,0.146,0.711,0.14300000000000002,-0.1684,7,1,1,0,0,0,65.0,0,4,0,10,22,29,3,7,11,0,40,14,5,4,3,65,75,33,0,15,18,0,3,0,2,6,9,2,0,1,25,16,0,1,9,18,0,6,13,11,1,1,6,6,37,18,45,58,10,34,0,0,0,0,33,11,0,11,16,214,62,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563801433422981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04966353399951369,0.07657929356752785,0.2234738339028461,0.08250415892405652,0.0,0.1021298429893222,0.0,0.12019645887694015,0.06501300757234528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065691998988571,0.4350075731543661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224179022684415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891979257322402,0.07502287826976656,0.0,0.18872902837957195,0.15314307282455294,0.0,0.0,0.11661850361949025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741248525747433,0.0,0.07630177380263793,0.0,0.07475024731973927,0.0,0.07473599306737064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289757462899965,0.09647247566958288,0.0,0.12306340986228873,0.06978417943977894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738532610125601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06674894327350067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128470244930086,0.0,0.15262257832451565,0.0,0.08301031645880129,0.0,0.0,0.24155056112461384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654213649369905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790218050910812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027177398324482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051583902796540335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112089511342208,0.073570974675764,0.2207939889741988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368613363696634,0.0,0.11265190464992147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155480152078314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777555269077957,0.049487645495234336,0.1110866202056503,0.07771005429951802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903783072686367,0.0,0.0,0.07429870680742501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341625188102194,0.0,0.0,0.07305068917979557,0.0,0.09357096248542167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615424716259215,0.07311669724806638,0.0,0.0,0.06648461215701668,0.07618718324406053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208982067067859,0.0,0.07444583202916814,0.06187886658349787,0.05622277478304586,0.0,0.0,0.15507499587763154,0.0,0.05832259182076716,0.0,0.16731335791505778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647305025648137,0.0,0.0,0.06723706462255465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04679526850462463,0.07175251397123737,0.0,0.042584920234616366,0.0,0.0692247785413603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602776951291974,0.0,0.0,0.16086649445781473,0.0,0.08615106461107927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656635731122878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039920652431084,0.0,0.0531673839032369,0.0,0.0,0.15563722335699856,0.0,0.0,0.04702952191432423
mentalhealth,sincerityis_scary,2020/02/25,"I feel like I’m losing my mind I’ve been this way for as long as I can remember. My feelings are so unstable, they can be super happy one second a really sad the next. I’m so emotional. I love my boyfriend, so why do I keep getting irritable and causing arguments? I don’t want to be this way. I’m so clingy and obsessive, it feels like my world is ending whenever people break up with me. I feel desperate to keep people I love in my life. Whenever my boyfriend is upset with me, I feel like I can’t breath and make desperate attempts to be reassured or to make him not be upset anymore. This is really unhealthy and I don’t want to be a toxic person, I’m trying so hard to be normal. I’m really impulsive too and it drives me nuts. I feel like I don’t know who I am sometimes. I am diagnosed with mild anxiety and ADHD (I’m aware alot of things I struggle with come from ADHD), but sometimes I feel like something else is there. or I’m just broken or something. 

Sorry, I just needed to rant.",0.9313570487483532,3.096994144927536,3.5278546332894187,86.5282509881423,83.39613526570048,7.048660518225735,22.45256916996048,8.150884317080207,1.4357362318840572,776,27,161,17,22,271,105,207,0.172,0.701,0.127,-0.75,0,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,3,9,16,0,4,4,0,21,5,1,3,0,38,47,17,0,4,7,0,8,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,11,0,2,9,0,0,2,5,6,0,2,1,8,28,10,18,40,1,11,0,2,0,2,7,3,0,4,8,100,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631042245975148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08373816857482651,0.0,0.10855694018629912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244767797295828,0.0,0.0942918635702256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110167650654812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144149684124034,0.12313007296621288,0.096950886167725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3874311098283942,0.3909985516572088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718940320153601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652438757397986,0.09805649618685287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19458979888520853,0.0,0.0,0.06015747995384189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731628303297566,0.2673881422358949,0.0,0.0,0.09687046960570553,0.0,0.12246003454784885,0.0,0.0,0.19758754746565055,0.0,0.14613353661116776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052546629221856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116472302401155,0.0,0.0,0.11641413190539775,0.0,0.10724956792374216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417431792310449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517744057084464,0.0955780398384394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21037257633623707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399916420330807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685384677142639,0.21652153260830787,0.12253380309078295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443350133113725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07272172207007885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743175466152022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291271062085887,0.1737717603683513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877247431633668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anxietyisasucks,2020/02/25,"I am beginning to question myself and I beleive my self esteem has taken a hit. (21M) Hi, so basically I have feeling really anxious for the past week or so. i had an anxiety attack in the middle of a class in my uni. It's been sort of uncontrollable for me. I got into a fight with my father, he says he is depressed but is not ready to seek help from a qualified therapist. He cried and said he is not gonna live long enough, that he is tired from life. With my exams coming up there isn't much I could do. I have been asking him to seek help. And recently an d friend of mine accused me of being a self centred narcissistic arsehole who does not care for anyone. I basically just make friends for my own benefits and that hit me hard. I have been self loathing a lot and I have bad anxiety for most days. And I can't sleep at night because I keep hallucinating that someone is right there who wants to harm me as soon as I close my eyes, or I feel like someone is breathing down my neck. My therapist is swamped with her other patients so she can't give me appointments, sometimes I feel like I am going crazy but I don't know. So this is sort of my cry for help out in the universe.",2.7923427471116824,4.0709990772357765,4.377359863072314,86.7397625160462,74.4878048780488,7.780573384681215,25.955498502353443,8.371475516178862,1.537076422764228,927,32,203,16,19,311,140,246,0.19699999999999998,0.6920000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.9642,0,0,0,0,2,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,8,12,2,1,11,0,26,6,4,1,0,34,45,16,0,2,8,1,4,2,2,1,2,2,0,3,8,13,0,1,5,0,0,2,7,6,0,0,7,7,36,6,30,33,5,21,0,1,1,0,26,11,0,7,10,137,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18846455410472016,0.13915821151721205,0.0,0.08613024166460392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515656708363907,0.14013490526323122,0.0,0.0,0.10285006113317056,0.07508931632319163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125590105179301,0.0,0.0,0.10610856629606248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834911721504687,0.0,0.27061464545778235,0.0794408372498416,0.0,0.10609465691390273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077955499582018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12727775221577356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18685035732589705,0.1759994729949703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19033695159465774,0.0,0.0,0.1181653727053525,0.07000596895071418,0.0,0.09851820901608116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034498452407017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24769464692967666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948794410119443,0.0,0.0,0.0676964449337907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700559765540758,0.12035894230083916,0.0,0.1087700977378174,0.10901032450835374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472313570147386,0.0,0.0,0.08222353165199547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905513908343828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559598031926716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175891410542619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798966544141894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891219036243466,0.0,0.12162527872630555,0.0,0.0,0.10519495118633243,0.1171722812624143,0.0979575909024962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.385510462710246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326884689876465,0.0,0.2087398384946377,0.0,0.12182805879206532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860426877818099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157716059800093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265468933885423,0.0,0.0988074759425206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,magsiepie,2020/02/25,"Does anyone else have this running ""I hate myself"" voice in their head that spontaneously replays over and over? How do I make it stop?

It's been a few years. It feels familiar to me. Still hate the way it makes me feel though.",0.8460000000000001,3.3816392666666717,1.495000000000001,97.7025,89.66666666666666,4.777777777777779,16.38888888888889,6.42735559955562,-0.4421111111111111,177,4,39,2,6,54,38,45,0.203,0.797,0.0,-0.8738,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,3,2,2,0,2,0,3,1,1,3,0,7,9,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,3,6,0,4,8,1,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,26,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861694752095205,0.2728064713622454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23299877694279506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22241924526205054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692498576867009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5257371338251953,0.27325119858844765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3554503375744311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21262906109170265,0.22259845783823864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615910781804621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21133831533888053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17145745372505428
mentalhealth,codename-cerulean,2020/02/25,"A very extended favour As a favour to my friend who was struggling from health / mental health problems I agreed to temporarily look after her cat. The idea was she would live with a friend until she saves money and gets in her feet, then find a place that allows cats to take it back. I already had a couple cats so I figured this wasn’t a huge deal.

Fast forward a year and her and I had a bit of a falling out after I made it clear I wasn’t going to tolerate certain behaviour. I messaged her asking if she had a plan for the cat, as I’m trying to get caught up in my bills and working long hours. I really don’t have the money/ time/ energy to be looking after this cat any longer and I’ve received no help from her in it. He also has the tendency to fight with my cats over dominance issues. 

I’ve received no reply from her thus far (about a day) and I’m worried it will end up being ignored as she may not be in a place to properly deal with this. 

So now what do I do with this cat?",2.498953349282296,3.653016535885168,4.070882177033493,89.14211273923449,75.0287081339713,6.947488038277513,23.110346889952154,7.413659706084162,0.7857007177033491,772,21,170,9,16,258,117,209,0.08900000000000001,0.775,0.136,0.8707,0,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,6,10,1,1,16,0,18,3,1,3,2,26,29,15,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,11,11,0,1,3,0,3,6,6,4,0,0,9,2,22,6,33,14,1,32,0,0,2,0,22,13,0,2,15,116,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16987220234149275,0.123102562483209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046817577539071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439093788800914,0.0,0.0,0.118367281038902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805824142213713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032725456677913,0.0,0.09927598430435827,0.3174025105464383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634160415484795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069471395560185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378611413626349,0.0,0.16085041161287586,0.0,0.0874853754738889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272535363287025,0.0,0.0,0.1031800550453588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15159595059798706,0.0,0.0,0.17377500529113205,0.0,0.16066918873431515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13592830702227532,0.13622851469791006,0.2585349381426373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14565796391374713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15513128047863206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32166070990757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14729596117142205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861534247436718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16092732884928607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574071339303707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976131871753669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451243844063487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270133203458662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206724036638482,0.1563294788327715,0.0,0.10935171678216048,0.0,0.0,0.0991297361231998
mentalhealth,jneistat623,2020/02/25,"I'm wasting away Hey guys,

I'm an 18 year old dude and I'm depressed because I don't have any purpose in my life.

I don't really have many friends and I don't have a hobby, so I spend most of my time alone in my room wasting away looking at reddit or instagram.

It's so frustrating because I know that I'm actually quite a creative, intelligent dude with lots of potential but I'm just too much of a dumbass to make anything of it.

I don't even really know what the point of this post is...

I never actually tell anyone how I really feel and how I'm hurting because I feel so alone and worthless, I guess this post is just a cry for help, to see if anyone else has had a similar experience, or knows how to get out of this rut...",3.5796153846153835,3.7866464487179528,5.697846153846158,81.99715384615386,71.69230769230771,9.316923076923075,29.70256410256411,9.3871,2.3887687179487185,570,22,127,12,10,201,88,156,0.187,0.748,0.064,-0.9590000000000001,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,10,5,1,0,7,0,11,1,0,4,1,25,27,14,0,1,6,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,7,6,0,0,5,0,1,0,5,4,0,0,1,4,13,1,17,26,3,14,0,3,2,0,5,8,0,6,4,77,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.2795657503891287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29670963695073144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740901630212036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003153368179014,0.14676766998330334,0.11787540957431313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26915988935774304,0.0,0.0,0.26195575560925555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157343874825705,0.0,0.0,0.12337354756907636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196597508246417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460954747296406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011750652090518,0.0,0.0,0.144854240658904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066789617300384,0.0,0.07483768281688315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15779647408047914,0.14183143699354894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601164404971893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334280627019012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361650665237773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117558747398832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12028664088449498,0.0,0.0,0.12177865634207607,0.0,0.0,0.09561470001073746,0.14522422592615272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052988590520416,0.0,0.11047654418447714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15030767996890346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354093564666973,0.0,0.2743711970108783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235478629689228,0.0,0.0,0.27529219155759593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414479443110295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12519923596985968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352517139434462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224272011891453
mentalhealth,passwordAlive223,2020/02/25,"Getting something off my chest in poetry form. Fuck the world and everyone in it,

Fuck this place,

They can sit and spin.

The assholes, the shit, the cumrags, the bit***s.

I dont know who I am,

But I know I dont want any part in it.

Who are these people?

The assholes? The fuckery puckery lolli pops?

I hate them all, the stupid fucks!

One day will come when they are out of luck.

The time is now, the day is upon us,

To lose control, to let the saunas steam and warm.

To let out shouts that give us warn.

To let out pouts that give a scorn.

I hate these fucks with all my soul,

One day will come when the rain will pour.

Let it rain for days and days and days,

Water reaching my forehead, I get lost in a daze.

But I dont drown.

Let all those fucks die who thought they wore the crown.

""No air""",0.26195448460508786,2.3142517951807235,1.0861847389558257,103.70095046854084,85.26506024096386,4.1708165997322615,17.053547523427042,5.033348758259628,-1.0390082998661314,602,13,150,2,18,184,93,166,0.272,0.659,0.069,-0.9898,0,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,2,0,4,4,3,14,9,0,15,0,17,9,3,1,3,22,36,9,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,12,11,1,1,3,0,0,2,4,12,0,2,3,2,17,2,16,25,5,25,1,2,0,5,11,12,6,1,10,95,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06532436699751812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487307889332262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16549506005852493,0.0,0.0,0.10773990834191856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3717060721114439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969553066254334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377462250297344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178983010732616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4440314659472481,0.10037518996005944,0.1842997802660536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18967951785490533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558456881611886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.491141343568925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746701785765116,0.10486127558945417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018602809076849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402405368885688,0.0,0.06659618719211982,0.0,0.1003626740395466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986046216029744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395199007751761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626122865362912,0.05601359254847541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310976705366252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665891357969155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,some_almonds,2020/02/25,waiting for maintenance hoping it doesn't end in additional inspection.  Or eviction.  I'm tired and depressed and level one is as clean/organized as it's going to get in here in the immediate term.  I want to go to sleep forever.  Never wanted to be alive.,2.166190476190476,4.935646469387759,4.6929591836734685,75.96215986394559,84.3061224489796,8.164625850340135,26.534013605442176,8.841846274778883,2.906385034013605,203,9,35,6,6,71,40,49,0.171,0.705,0.124,-0.5423,2,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,3,2,1,0,1,9,11,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,10,10,1,9,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,2,3,23,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2895912781712955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977967648675294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17566440010314954,0.0,0.38217038666724296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339486484322742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593185027804891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22783568863457704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364691867667198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3864427492395733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.396630046465989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SnowBird312,2020/02/25,"Took the first step today. I feel really really proud of myself today, I finally went to the doctor and am finally getting help for my issues that I've been dealing with for a number of years.
I have severe anxiety and depression, due to being abused by my ex boyfriend, and it got so bad I haven't been able to function normally since I left him.
 I start anti-depressants and counseling as of today, and I feel hope for the first time in two years. I can only imagine what I'll be capable of once I have energy, mental clarity, and less negative thoughts. I know progress isn't linear, but I'm gonna strive to be the best that I can, and take it one day at a time. 
I think I'm going to be alright.",4.461458333333333,4.68525834027778,6.137500000000002,79.5575,69.7638888888889,10.011111111111113,28.5,9.994966539143718,2.6249916666666664,547,18,112,13,9,189,91,144,0.08900000000000001,0.75,0.161,0.8437,0,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,0,5,1,6,0,0,6,1,13,1,0,0,0,17,29,10,0,2,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,6,0,0,4,3,2,0,4,6,2,16,4,17,18,2,21,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,1,14,73,21,1,0.14396141005441174,0.1705707301704979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101300846519178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020176412331862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151078618138919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284319985479078,0.14841789244179582,0.2479875030622885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735060335795022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558242895979312,0.0,0.0,0.3154053758729539,0.0,0.2449070036991245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521389496535058,0.0,0.0818165869259188,0.0,0.11513909074560152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649429858318727,0.0,0.0,0.14298616311703966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025830974825455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911742604977771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641449324951925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14507924124983915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14105161595179785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331420331579432,0.0975519772034456,0.10948913949596767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18445073124687955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263541637526646,0.0,0.11908636605317267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189662700182377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824106414237844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922446586559036,0.0,0.11428927893765448,0.16789011181943986,0.0,0.4093757512972,0.0,0.1599464235976814,0.0,0.0,0.1406293792121344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345366940808912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18541285622961834
mentalhealth,SkyRyzen,2020/02/25,"Post Traumatic Stress Disorder Survey Hello, I'm doing a short survey for school in collaboration with the Health Union If you could take this survey which is 1-2 minutes and anonymous it would be much appreciated. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSf3cH8HhemhsaFaWBg_YxutKiArAioc4GFgio1TSYxT8NV-0Q/viewform?usp=sf_link",19.730769230769234,25.192924128205128,13.382564102564105,22.270769230769247,38.487179487179496,10.328205128205127,30.948717948717945,10.504223727775694,3.843471794871795,287,7,27,5,3,79,37,39,0.207,0.7190000000000001,0.07400000000000001,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,5,7,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,4,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,17,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28326177878976544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4066069192847197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3771129754510653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26080303276693023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33977975131223703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3590548018973148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4063975947843251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667492935180178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520244807682212,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,is_reddit_useful,2020/02/25,"Searching for more information about something I call ""energy"" A key aspect of my own mental state affects the kinds of thoughts, feelings and motivations which arise. I call it energy. I would like to know more about it, such as what terminology others use, others' experiences and books or other materials which talk about it.

When I have energy, then I feel motivation to fix problems, I have the ability to genuinely express positive emotions in social interactions, I get more creative ideas, and I get more positive and less negative thoughts.

When I lack energy I worry about problems without motivation to fix them, making positive expressions in social interactions is a difficult struggle to find and express some positivity, and I behave in a highly habitual way. I'm also driven to seek simple easy rewards like amusing posts on Reddit or sweet foods. More negative thoughts arise, tending towards extreme pessimism, anger and anxiety.

Energy also makes a difference in how I perceive the present moment. Along with perception, all sorts of nameless feelings arise which seem like essences of things I'm perceiving. When I have more energy I feel more of these feelings, and they're more pleasant. Maybe I could say this means I perceive more beauty when I have more energy.

The amount of energy I have can change within a few hours or less. Spending a large part of a day in nature can cause a big improvement. Even taking a walk can cause a notable improvement. Wasting time online can cause a notable negative effect. Accomplishing even something small which is meaningfully beneficial can cause an improvement, but work which seems to accomplish nothing tends to be draining. It's certainly not like simply resting increases energy and doing some kind of work decreases it.

For as long as I remember, I've found myself generally low on energy, even though on many days there are short periods where I have plenty of energy. Improvement always seems accessible, in that I can do things which improve my state. But at the same time I can't seem to keep myself in a good state where I have a reasonable amount of energy. At least I can't seem to do that at home, maybe not as long as my mother is around, though I'm not sure about that.

I can relate to a lot of what people say in /r/CPTSD. But this energy phenomenon seems like something different from trauma. I can be a lot more functional in a higher energy state, and my level of energy can change surprisingly quickly if I do particular things which have an effect on it.",8.547641477465268,9.028855841409692,8.582114537444934,64.63400542189093,61.070484581497794,12.359064723822431,36.404269739071495,11.87940476392328,4.78208024398509,2048,86,322,61,26,668,217,454,0.07,0.721,0.209,0.9951,1,0,3,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,1,11,23,22,1,1,23,0,31,1,0,15,3,81,61,32,0,6,11,1,5,5,0,1,0,2,1,0,27,13,1,1,32,2,1,3,9,7,0,0,5,8,34,15,58,52,28,52,0,1,0,0,15,27,0,15,21,239,61,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610200447121947,0.06560398708587506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060314950510504735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018730140853659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16101576064502834,0.0,0.0,0.3239753745461804,0.16681162994727936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295000315317982,0.0,0.0,0.10169488241433204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16474904933239154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868816196613784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15622587648896086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712392971027036,0.0,0.0,0.19932784546706706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206139779066831,0.0,0.09533769741378932,0.08644766886089653,0.0,0.0,0.08238479733990511,0.0,0.0,0.06613006519047712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330233299795174,0.07908631321733801,0.0,0.0776448225549066,0.0,0.0,0.0890045505640773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700795962543819,0.0,0.16420644227043107,0.04333024578881736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19259440277395887,0.0,0.0,0.1395477756353495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13405960133234565,0.0,0.0,0.10525710292734182,0.07993478667054338,0.15841749404452507,0.08588352694526416,0.0,0.0,0.07945555734150839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565232521249689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537966986704577,0.0,0.05466005481649728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551013944725249,0.0,0.0,0.15088488476236828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106409993179055,0.0,0.0,0.0893141512353881,0.0,0.0,0.125398800331003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4306561735943253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607417421944696,0.0,0.18209239906325214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242419301735512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430892869348159,0.0,0.0592803905271332,0.06337130194183772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15714006440597295,0.0,0.15492639128609378,0.18777845013358554,0.09194838828643613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06809534395469248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06258218507235913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600218035975681,0.0,0.11479780242337892,0.08006925380388588,0.0,0.056008057023509916,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,big_drayco,2020/02/25,"Military, need to vent Will keep this as non rantish as I can.

I've been in the military for 7 years now, and ever since I left an operational unit to shore duty, my mind has been going crazy. Started on my last deployment- insomnia attacks (one which I'm in the middle of right now), OCD im pretty sure, depression? Idek.

I'm now long-distance with my amazing, loving girlfriend of over 3 years and I've become increasingly bad at communicating with her, which has started to cause serious issues. I've stopped talking to my parents as much, I don't enjoy my current job and leave to go home and drink and play video games. Every few weeks or so I have bad insomnia attacks where I feel like I get almost no sleep for days. They're debilitating, I basically call in sick and then sit at home tired, anxious, and miserable and feel like a huge piece of shit. I've resorted to too much Unisom and alcohol to get to bed on almost all nights.

I've developed habits like ""if you don't close this door twice or hold your pillow a certain way four times you won't sleep tonight/won't break up with your girlfriend"". 

I've been getting increasingly paranoid over dumb things as well. And overall I just feel like my success of a life so far is spiraling out of control.

I'm seeing a psychologist tomorrow who I saw about 6 months ago, and I swore off a psychiatrist and meds because they'd jeapordize my career. Now, though, I'll do anything to make myself right, even if it means sacrificing that. That said, I'm scared of meds.

Does anyone have any advice on dealing with mental health professionals, or being in the military and facing a potential medical separation for mental health issues?

Thanks. Sorry lol",5.966536663745256,6.804670322085893,6.426862401402277,76.63477505112476,66.63803680981594,9.522407245106633,31.474729769208288,9.606745405546679,2.864292608822669,1359,52,252,27,21,441,199,326,0.152,0.7290000000000001,0.12,-0.8479,3,0,2,0,0,0,41.0,0,4,1,2,14,23,4,2,10,1,16,15,4,3,4,44,39,26,0,3,6,1,3,4,2,2,9,1,5,0,9,19,2,5,4,4,0,4,4,10,1,3,5,6,24,13,41,30,7,49,0,2,2,1,16,22,2,7,24,140,33,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404766021579757,0.08531371638768491,0.10285462284640907,0.19274715909873852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544861998801886,0.0,0.0,0.10872732788014172,0.0,0.06729542528437096,0.0,0.07919988498018911,0.0,0.0,0.218980879761068,0.0,0.0,0.16071796550699005,0.05866891092630579,0.10629296146894747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827498324910657,0.0,0.0,0.09886819271325777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794483961677144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06206884857576784,0.09922242777405813,0.08289405578615293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422300040034615,0.0,0.0,0.0942816146824572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356767119576863,0.08705740949646325,0.08108897714151407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599023545931142,0.20626830639479812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084916928863765,0.0,0.1093943628145849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20460386602663028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19307938739740926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395908193796684,0.20090561914285385,0.09550644322777288,0.08554530463867585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845098588565583,0.0,0.10190756466663453,0.10456842840126328,0.0,0.06797935989941294,0.1880781024730516,0.0,0.0,0.08517213009506408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686317082186333,0.0,0.06424302804641872,0.0,0.0,0.10483696922721872,0.2138088134210621,0.09695481525236176,0.19398085095531956,0.0,0.09717811250606352,0.0,0.07682033790668549,0.0,0.14149952997973173,0.07136305188432565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031764577000774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652168269811629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686659200459572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791385018005376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16438219238765067,0.09154924387417092,0.0,0.09635615002779664,0.0,0.07669330374060218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879217671716063,0.07961330106624306,0.0,0.192625245582597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773629012402804,0.1362427473772887,0.0,0.0,0.080463555429861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070799893571092,0.0,0.0,0.07735657195121254,0.0,0.08860773161319001,0.0,0.0,0.06393965052611904,0.0,0.09455837395974506,0.0,0.056120135584447,0.11061730524450136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639330665570443,0.07720042329289979,0.0,0.0865341206633362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239548239969774
mentalhealth,oknakeddog,2020/02/25,How do I know if I need antidepressants? I dont know much about mental health in the first place but people around me think I'm depressed and I think so as well but when ever I think hard about it I just deny it and move on. How do I know if I'm depressed is the overall question?,-0.08597189695550256,2.0099543606557404,1.736440281030447,98.13426229508198,87.36065573770495,4.141451990632318,16.911007025761126,5.288315135182226,-0.8251845433255274,220,5,52,1,7,72,38,61,0.221,0.73,0.049,-0.8977,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,10,3,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,2,1,19,13,11,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,7,0,0,1,1,2,1,1,0,1,8,1,6,13,1,8,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,3,3,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902620302737814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3681648991807606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25048604085239823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19332799008465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18179577844070385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19145709729461094,0.0,0.0,0.2271814335578432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35237573053519605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21538619312825694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22715760404401825,0.1571136787042552,0.15847560209867903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817114770846682,0.0,0.22329885878646824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394227604998723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41084222028903017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19216592497235985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rebeckah99,2020/02/25,"toxic? i don’t really know where else to ask if my now ex friend is toxic or just kinda crazy or if i’m just overly sensitive...
so for the longest time she has been degrading me in subtle ways that i think she knows she’s doing but doesn’t think it’s a bad thing. she thinks she’s always right no matter what and becomes so defensive. she always gossips about people and talks shit about everyone. she never liked my other friends for the slightest things. she definitely has anger issues. yesterday, i was ignoring her because i was w a friend and i was busy. she kept calling and then started calling me weird and saying “see this is why no one talks to you because you’re a fucking weirdo” and so on and then she comes to my house and starts banging on my door and keeps trying to facetime me. she called my other friends and just didn’t get the hint that i didn’t wanna talk to her. i think i have the right not to respond to people lol. & last night she called my friend again and started name calling and telling my other friends to kill themselves. also threatening them by saying she would drive the two hours to beat them up and get other people to kill them. she then came back to my house and was looking through my windows and just kept yelling at my other friends. i don’t see why she wants to be my friend if i’m just so weird and annoying??? lmaoo i don’t know why i’m posting this .. i kind of want an outside pov and rant a little bit. thanks 4 readin",2.880033557046982,4.624783285234901,3.472222818791945,91.39928724832217,75.20805369127517,6.110281879194631,24.00053691275168,6.742157984588678,0.6677219865771811,1161,36,243,10,25,364,153,298,0.193,0.675,0.132,-0.9764,0,0,0,0,1,0,25.0,0,1,3,1,16,24,7,0,10,1,19,2,1,0,1,51,47,31,2,7,12,1,0,1,8,1,0,3,2,0,13,19,0,5,7,0,0,3,10,13,0,2,10,6,46,11,26,35,1,30,0,0,3,1,45,10,2,6,16,160,59,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562114082614508,0.13655638523339578,0.08890897935580172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671243739529487,0.0,0.0,0.06309694828100057,0.06851436331937648,0.10004265711246138,0.09062576865508183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958524749523858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4189480551408595,0.093851616032738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068504172392667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854829011527107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840920410160936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5071777269154432,0.07586059109224944,0.08574303653371665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808098468642415,0.18936606291957286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564643373524468,0.0,0.07293624037352643,0.18156834448585932,0.08544998248023501,0.13528953038593838,0.06688759819448219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040089019931928906,0.0822429062318288,0.0,0.0,0.06890741038250425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328759795587496,0.0,0.0,0.07700515591914857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05560410579152051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706644634104994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858814798778099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05256796565068776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015285991152374,0.0,0.13051041290669532,0.0,0.0,0.13077798390668094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423057207524445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742415988901676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19786349058443067,0.07172163981896643,0.07554727683991071,0.0,0.0,0.10903036092676144,0.21031585030444247,0.0,0.0,0.04784823335507241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055711475883632976,0.0,0.08015799477646245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679896593883984,0.06513321333886388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22213167299507106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05829110508988512,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,msweewoo,2020/02/25,"How did you find out/confirm that you have mental issues? I feel exhausted and unwell for no reason a lot of the time and when I try to look up symptoms of depression, anxiety, or even bipolar I feel very related to most of those but I am not sure if this is one of those situation when you have some minor health issues and googling it makes you feel like you are about to die of some horrible disease (If that makes sense).    


How did you confirm/ find out you or people around you have actual mental issues and how did you/others seek for help?",5.037063492063492,5.6920197962962975,5.614179894179895,82.29166666666669,68.62962962962962,9.134391534391536,26.539682539682538,9.23628265651192,1.9752126984126968,430,12,86,8,7,139,67,108,0.168,0.775,0.057,-0.9033,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,8,0,0,8,4,0,0,2,0,9,4,0,6,1,28,15,14,1,2,6,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,3,4,12,2,14,12,4,6,0,1,1,0,9,3,0,8,4,65,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.16187178507280586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689526370900764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476654800489087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286940619853347,0.0,0.17215388334304546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095600323935431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251616814415058,0.11850238706390134,0.0,0.0,0.3032166982975125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17631923403868466,0.0,0.0,0.11118369248357828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5193967089076186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103900383578655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392946972458749,0.0,0.0,0.14102248546842153,0.0,0.0,0.22144804431009105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343295092396988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240238225269324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499805622952823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170548931087763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18645242281670527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15633687871220112,0.17240946173568605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096724069906958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261942834963765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13686569506524246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway135465,2020/02/25,"no one likes me they do sometimes, but I can't connect anymore. Been so ruined by others I don't know what to do anymore. Don't want to live anymore but too much of a coward to take my own life. most likely will shoot someone. I am done trying to be nice against people who only leave anyway. So feel like taking revenge on the last person who did that to me AGAIN! What's the use if people are just utterly useless.",1.8539534883720958,3.8039987558139567,3.2838953488372127,90.66561046511627,78.88372093023256,4.765116279069769,22.377906976744185,5.148860815047168,0.14600465116279038,327,10,66,1,8,107,66,86,0.256,0.654,0.09,-0.9515,0,0,0,1,0,1,8.0,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,0,3,0,12,1,0,1,0,9,18,5,0,2,4,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,3,1,7,4,9,13,3,3,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,2,5,51,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5839946321617338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20087069691067255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924907263455912,0.14022813278693905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787471016632648,0.16000085701461106,0.0,0.2078405707571193,0.0,0.0,0.13864396629844628,0.2876890956975752,0.0,0.17332583387068307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442942099983302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13300977790092486,0.1492858119784748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721626643773578,0.17139104486671214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16631412181096006,0.0,0.19413377682053595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951681824205815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13326661634660775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952974438664625,0.0,0.0,0.11577570376581545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,k1717k,2020/02/25,"I'm a hypichondriac. Does anyone have advice or recommended resources to help overcome this? Every little symptom that I have - A pain in my side, a pop in my neck, a cramp - I always think the worst. I Google my symptoms and try to self diagnose. I get extremely anxious, I obsess about the symptoms,  and can't stop thinking that it's something serious. I'm terrified of dying. These thoughts take over my mind and it's hard to escape them.

My family is my main support system and they are truly amazing. But I need more help than their kind words and love. I don't want to have thoughts and feelings like this for the rest of my life. 

Does anyone else have hypochondriac tendencies? Have you found anything that helps?",3.2022163865546207,5.840173948529412,3.7294537815126065,85.62647058823529,77.89705882352942,6.532773109243697,25.890756302521005,7.7094869923839395,1.627243277310924,571,22,104,9,14,179,91,136,0.142,0.64,0.218,0.9142,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,3,0,1,9,0,1,7,0,9,9,1,0,0,19,23,8,1,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,7,0,0,1,8,6,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,2,18,5,12,20,4,7,0,0,0,1,9,5,0,1,2,66,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14340833144356868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211280520205993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16579258471535915,0.0,0.20523051039596016,0.1503689347944494,0.12076773977651432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489543201249254,0.15230962909152215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568544486672051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225958637301904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364831707293104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834856022964334,0.0,0.07420427765466382,0.10484256451071186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609104540241532,0.0,0.0,0.07667398854897532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146461135970494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951024972719635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15282386169338255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365815112685926,0.07169760203189582,0.1470881346305955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13245308137255146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481817935220578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088177650987739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15615880373433347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15309858553727376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297999122360344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269464439345185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653704715912715,0.0,0.457607240549514,0.110342299337176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18807072562177932,0.0,0.2330158508231304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996377370486165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656053139695756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DarkSpiritAC,2020/02/25,"Im Sad hello i am male and 18 years old and last week i had an appointment with a girl i really loved the same day she started writing her ex again at the end of our appointment she went to him and stayed at I was so sad and can not think of anything else now I have strong inferiority complexes which is strengthened by the fact that I weigh a little more. Every night I wonder for hours if I will ever find the right girl. I am actually very confident but that just completely wiped me out

Thank you for reading this long text",3.6366666666666654,4.873632851851851,4.75277777777778,85.03250000000003,72.33333333333334,8.362962962962964,24.61111111111111,8.841846274778883,1.5316444444444441,420,12,90,8,8,138,83,108,0.057,0.828,0.114,0.7225,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,1,0,1,5,6,0,0,7,0,8,2,0,0,2,18,14,7,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,6,1,0,4,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,0,16,3,10,10,2,20,0,3,0,1,13,5,0,2,13,59,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.2026648521733004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17090221118283574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21774759437668734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13393584434907596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734892466492419,0.0,0.1839420480224377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18785764381497272,0.17497860633895698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18981494307146327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045220884538824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243290754801007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16928619228027578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081490263347293,0.0,0.18378947605845172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18743850407765295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19489277509409786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21792428935954608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20773530977379384,0.0,0.13304455506161944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735682422492788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469963421678415,0.22135829745739236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912030208677365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330723872410051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17135701472321174,0.0,0.0,0.1665876541147468,0.0,0.0,0.1925206145588544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22521913455828985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373853707717906
mentalhealth,twenty20reddit,2020/02/25,"Feeling detached from people and life (disassociation?) It's like there's 2 parts of me

1. The part underneath, the real me - that feels broken, fragile, weak, and just tired.

2. The part that people see / that comes out when people I love are around me - it's like I automatically get happier, look normal and feel okay (not completely better mentally, but okay).

I've been in this rut for 2 years now I'd say.
It's gotten so much worse this last year, since I started spending all my time in my room.
I'd eat, sleep, wake up (phone), eat and sleep. This cycle goes on for weeks.

I'm 19F for reference, I've tried so many times to get out of it but it's so damn hard!
It's like I relapse (right word?) all over again.

What should I do?",0.9598741610738236,3.1602693624161056,2.6136870805369163,92.91032927852348,83.56375838926175,5.604194630872483,18.0373322147651,6.9077264865688965,-0.0644600671140938,561,13,127,7,16,184,96,149,0.128,0.765,0.10800000000000001,-0.7191,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,1,9,9,1,0,3,2,4,9,3,0,2,22,16,10,0,2,4,0,5,3,0,1,3,1,1,0,13,8,2,0,4,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,2,8,10,7,16,13,6,22,0,0,2,1,3,11,1,0,13,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12586938614509569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505025975675851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179720047285772,0.14824744530815748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893598459060835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144770325719865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477435898055591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665999240582787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152538359991328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986977102610907,0.2072318390847074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873416881046328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12761233694194002,0.0,0.0,0.1433498984566566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249047944128151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393982585514094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385347221959052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4593432039600642,0.0,0.2940714662769328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093572740791412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074850321344564,0.0,0.11244106629148053,0.0,0.0,0.11267159171759016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169614153455282,0.0,0.28298941323729826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007840618587048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16489431789490328,0.16250998777628928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959962904646734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134166107004956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440911333820923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821043903396138
mentalhealth,ardentghoul,2020/02/25,"How to I admit myself into the hospital? I’m getting really bad as of late, mentally. My doctors have always urged me and recommended that I be admitted. The problem arises in that I work in our local hospital. 
I’m scared of people that I work with seeing me there and for what reason. I also don’t have any more pto left for missing work. 
I’m scared but I need help. I don’t want to lose this job. I don’t know how to call out of work and I don’t know how to admit myself in this situation.",0.5678701298701299,2.6030312761904777,3.528917748917753,86.76350649350651,83.85714285714286,6.4848484848484835,19.069264069264072,7.686295010490155,0.6925238095238098,384,10,82,7,11,137,60,105,0.131,0.759,0.11,-0.47600000000000003,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,5,5,6,0,2,2,0,7,1,0,4,0,19,20,9,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,6,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,1,15,0,16,19,1,8,0,2,1,0,6,7,0,0,1,56,21,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512101933195448,0.15099708395698747,0.0,0.0,0.12340541971073778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15151937498511608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853005541926145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185741627731611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481027536046988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216351183993592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800803854040105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19946168066543168,0.0,0.20470539551224712,0.0,0.19716704183697709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20301784852027208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18287848034358448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455726600861126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580803778612426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17364171466042694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11625394900777936,0.1865807742336691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633650682953384,0.0,0.1446076225724037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039792169027578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703535804521314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5284475587714013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mental-Mess-Lmao,2020/02/25,How To get over crush. Yeah I got rejected and I just wanna get over it quickly without mentally crumbling while at it any advice?,1.2885999999999989,3.925411360000002,2.895500000000002,85.43525000000002,95.4,5.7,26.25,7.1686216300943375,1.9576,104,5,18,2,4,34,21,25,0.18100000000000002,0.738,0.081,-0.4019,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,5,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,6,2,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4329746813556837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30131100890186435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.462984199398838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3543732163646101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4465225234671809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42711531450698864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,2343405,2020/02/25,"How does one feel clean? Hi

To put it all simply, I don't feel clean. All day I think about cutting off my skin so I can regrow it, and it can be clean. I look forward to adulthood and moving out because then I'll be able to wear gloves all day. I pull out my hair because I feel the dirt underneath it. 

Any time I try to talk about germs or how I don't feel clean, I'm just told to stop thinking like that. It will ruin my life. 

I found that counting to 26 helps. 26 is my current favorite number and just makes me feel better. 

I just want to know hat to do to feel cleaner. I have to do unclean things because I'll get scolded for not taking care of my mental health, but I want to feel clean while doing them. PLEASE, I'm begging, help me.",1.1927223719676547,2.7466982138364777,2.4946316262354045,97.4056132075472,79.44025157232706,4.794429469901169,20.791105121293803,4.65589566412798,-0.4072177897574121,572,15,135,1,14,184,92,159,0.054000000000000006,0.752,0.19399999999999998,0.9544,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,1,8,5,1,0,1,0,12,5,3,3,3,31,33,10,0,2,6,0,9,1,0,1,2,0,5,0,8,5,0,1,11,0,0,4,3,2,0,1,2,10,20,3,19,28,3,15,0,1,1,0,6,5,0,1,9,78,28,0,0.1579215841595414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739209259035758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888025957855185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13966880782770144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16101157997251184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20369271451242146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381982425127905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5589492857462434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731528658620614,0.0,0.0,0.0825075097503431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16786325921539202,0.0,0.0,0.2117030180360301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867895726478637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154468518797536,0.07715250909301913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261435712670866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541388370769188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591478132798184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784565170322202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701175246922702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17335047644549506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875481031456454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202951561782153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873737770433225,0.12693138738415047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491608334527293,0.20237954907069247,0.0,0.0,0.09208534569516733,0.0,0.0,0.15090084124525355,0.0,0.10721838939929144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862924838889133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StateofSerenityYT,2020/02/25,"Relaxation: Calming Nature Sounds, Soothe Anxiety, Stress and Insomnia [...  In this video: Relaxation: Calming Sounds of Nature \[1 Hour\], Can help soothe anxiety, insomnia and/or stress.  Welcome to State of Serenity,   Our purpose and passion is to help you relax, unwind and rejuvenate through better sleep, reduced stress, greater concentration and improved mental wellness.   Life can affect us all in different ways, Some get insomnia, others depression, anxiety and others still may suffer with stress at home home or at work. We all need some help and we hope here on our channel that the videos we create can be used to help those that need it.  Our videos will consist of waterfalls, rainforests, beaches, starry night skies and more, accompanied by the soothing sounds of nature and/or calming music to relax too.",11.3721052631579,11.731759894736845,9.120751879699249,63.51240601503761,55.31578947368421,12.111278195488724,42.30827067669173,11.491704259439757,5.3190180451127835,658,31,89,15,7,195,85,133,0.125,0.5489999999999999,0.326,0.9879,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,7,1,0,2,4,18,0,4,2,0,7,6,1,2,2,22,12,8,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,2,0,7,11,0,0,0,10,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,3,8,12,16,9,6,11,0,2,0,1,13,6,0,5,3,58,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31609404538679103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181285241124147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186284584817472,0.0,0.0,0.14390073283746846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195933912771778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3692757014558349,0.0,0.2763130585701281,0.13679905564058653,0.13563837742266704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728425756181132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388015648743966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20425321833521987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292522484246244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783157146443178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099930353611096,0.0,0.6310866344929479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567476138663095,0.11895631492391424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932533244927137,0.0,0.0,0.12383770154578284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027061135585698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Necromorphling,2020/02/25,"I keep creating/picking scabs on my scalp and I’m struggling to stop I won’t go deep into my issues, as the internet is an unrelenting mistress. However, I’ve been self harming for a little over a decade, I stopped cutting myself a few months ago. However, there’s just one form of self harming I just can’t shake... I create and pick scabs on my scalp. I dig deep, the pain is oddly comforting. Nothing triggers it, I just find myself idling digging into my scalp. I never really remember even starting it although I disassociate frequently so that might explain it. I’ve been doing this for years, I’ve got mad scars and multiple infections (nothing serious, yet) but I’m annoyed at myself for continuing to damage my fleshy vessel on this voyage of life. What do you guys suggest I do to combat this habit? How do I stop this when I never remember when I start doing it?",3.5707142857142884,5.776860833333334,5.2137142857142855,77.63128571428574,74.59523809523809,8.051428571428572,29.057142857142853,8.841846274778883,2.6862114285714287,692,30,121,15,15,234,103,168,0.18600000000000005,0.7929999999999999,0.021,-0.9706,2,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,1,0,0,10,11,3,2,6,0,12,8,3,3,2,23,20,10,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,10,5,0,4,4,0,0,2,4,10,0,1,3,0,22,1,16,15,2,27,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,1,15,86,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14672799949811638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109327756687148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15128692777250627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407171960025046,0.0,0.13238553044818768,0.0,0.0,0.16389585669089432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276518262787022,0.0,0.14712629982090095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691526178366267,0.0,0.16589961887860408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17559595610573833,0.0,0.0,0.1321205426170411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553262977119506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31765156411460244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216408054569436,0.0,0.17613035945508454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060396071375398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3750153053167843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3453575239807805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343190124077454,0.0,0.0,0.41515914511609103,0.0,0.17304275684392156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659272695710982
mentalhealth,ThatGalChae,2020/02/25,Paranoid I feel so paranoid over any little noise sometimes I feel like my mind is making those up even when I try to focus and tell myself it’s my head is making them up I can hear footsteps and other stuff. I always feel like my neighbors be watching me over the windows or when I go outside. I feel so paranoid  I feel like crying because I don’t know what to do anymore. I wasn’t like this before? How can I feel better?,2.7323051948051957,4.16236956818182,3.928766233766236,89.28636363636366,74.9090909090909,5.0285714285714285,25.07142857142857,3.1291,0.3585337662337662,334,11,67,0,7,109,55,88,0.11,0.7390000000000001,0.151,0.5535,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,1,6,5,0,0,1,0,8,1,1,3,0,14,19,8,0,0,1,0,6,4,1,0,0,1,2,0,6,2,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,8,17,5,6,17,0,8,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,1,6,47,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366822620180258,0.0,0.0,0.11741576253605672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712338441477691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525286728479888,0.0,0.14692224655901318,0.0,0.0,0.1527050938111991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896605852761893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404131343730164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.523817150687409,0.3700482987540427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09812752758860227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17720054462457732,0.0,0.19460209515535432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489026246558474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33741481214196084,0.1730522148168054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23050582661869404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743389269904077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707666700335314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19765614516278526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509137892814629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722584638727868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NemosHumanTank,2020/02/25,I have ASPD and I have to comfort my depressed friend So I have a antisocial personality disorder (ASPD) and my friend is depressed and needs comfort. I don’t want to do it because it is extremely inconvenient for me and I don’t like doing things like this but I still need him in my life so that I can have the relationships that are fun for me so how do I help him out?,1.9924675324675327,3.8834217532467576,4.331168831168832,83.60246753246757,78.22077922077922,7.5168831168831165,25.285714285714285,8.418075326091056,1.6493948051948055,293,11,63,6,7,102,44,77,0.098,0.648,0.254,0.8945,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,0,2,0,13,1,0,1,0,10,16,9,0,3,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,15,7,6,16,0,3,0,2,0,0,7,2,0,0,3,52,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017307330798475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4526211741311998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30114011456157025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4060078849269464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761192083567154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18559170137443973,0.2567377442277983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896591622540062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22942762289910415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821006496014117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20983656640476456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745628164782411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497976878032815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ceejisfear,2020/02/25,"Why do I start crying so much about my boyfriend? I keep crying when I watch a sappy movie when he's not there and I cry so hard when I try talking about how I feel about him. I cry a lot because I love him so much but I just feel kinda dumb for it? He's a great guy, and I've never been with someone so perfect for me (so pls don't think he did anything wrong). I do have Type II Bipolar so maybe those intense emotions are from my hypomania? I'm not sure.",0.08168316831683242,1.8201326633663368,2.0183069306930683,98.5815198019802,83.75247524752477,4.436039603960396,20.000990099009897,4.935628992294339,-0.5272700990099009,353,10,87,1,10,117,65,101,0.128,0.662,0.21,0.8949,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,15,6,1,0,3,0,7,2,0,1,3,17,14,13,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,4,15,4,7,12,3,5,0,0,1,1,8,0,1,2,5,55,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461817394316866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997211253287712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7187706133678505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840133724552456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542901896033207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803552603649497,0.0,0.16197686289921334,0.0,0.0,0.14654183271245974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14540365434559904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390758293118617,0.14764366693054826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16434514307654727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405105555955399,0.0,0.1261683899582986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13860674603853193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578773043369164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541788246513074,0.0,0.0,0.13148504522677534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481995316887673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106484432130437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761183573476494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17885671940706488,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Serious-Childhood,2020/02/25,"I use a spreadsheet to keep track of my symptoms, diagnoses, assessments and treatments (as well as relevant evidence)... I wonder if anyone does anything like this, or has a better way? I find it hard to remember and manage all that shit!",6.219689922480622,7.705481976744188,6.739534883720933,72.27271317829461,66.44186046511628,10.38449612403101,35.26356589147287,10.504223727775694,4.204789147286824,187,9,30,5,3,61,37,43,0.109,0.721,0.17,0.4199,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,0,2,0,1,3,1,1,1,10,4,6,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,3,5,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,21,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19253850324862445,0.0,0.22659827539704006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24353403489638506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794851681062148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24096987822970295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25167455966128965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24666897190407175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24475311427898075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452725869173193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119298316830452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826536537575507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28620505141965485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23782310960113776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185683924211491,0.0,0.0,0.2475822093708365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2986167769516133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lucky_Miner01,2020/02/25,"Suicidal thoughts... If I have thoughts about committing suicide or wanting to commit suicide but know that I would *never* actually do it, is it still something to worry about?",5.7070000000000025,8.875767700000004,5.616666666666671,72.60500000000002,72.0,8.0,40.0,8.841846274778883,4.443000000000001,141,9,20,3,3,44,24,30,0.32799999999999996,0.597,0.075,-0.8847,0,0,1,0,0,3,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,11,8,3,3,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,4,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.22841287390070886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12863555111111755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805247239382606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18019403983081128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18692395517904248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7680846628668109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3716416247663996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805711678140878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377035348545602,0.0,0.16627247666666742,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lartmydude,2020/02/25,"Need to vent Hey everyone. I’m just looking for a place to vent. My significant other of 15 years just seems to be so clueless/oblivious to how I have been feeling lately. We’ve been in love since day 1 and no one knows me better than she does. I’ve been pretty severely depressed for a while now due to work issues, bad money problems to the point where I can’t pay bills or eat only one meal a day, personal “health” issues (I’m a crazy hypochondriac), and sex life issues. 

She still talks to me all the time and calls me on every work break to just talk. The only thing is our sex life has taken a huge downturn and she does not care at all. I try to talk to her about my issues and how I am over with everything (not her, i love her immensely) and I don’t know what to do with my life anymore. I feel like a lost puppy that can’t find his way in life. What am I destined to be? 

I think she thinks that this is all a joke and I can just snap out of it. She doesn’t take anything I say seriously at all and I feel like I can’t talk to her about my problems because she just won’t listen. She always tries to fart and burp to lighten the mood but sometimes it just makes it worse lol. Life is such an emotional roller coaster. Even writing this I went through like 4 different emotions. 

Thank you for listening, I feel a little better for the time being just writing. 

Also I just have to say that I hate school. I have graduated 2x and nothing has come out of it. I have been working a dead end near minimum wage job for a little too long now because no one wants to take a chance on someone with not much experience in the fields I went to school for. I just want to have my own company and be my own boss but I have no idea what to do or how to even start. Now I’m done. Lol.",1.9337448524365115,3.3557612952127682,3.388194921070696,92.37403225806452,77.00531914893618,6.553740562800275,22.23541523678792,7.233258080335977,0.5215912148249829,1381,38,318,16,31,454,184,376,0.106,0.782,0.11199999999999999,0.0222,3,0,0,0,0,1,32.0,1,1,0,6,25,18,1,0,18,2,31,13,0,5,4,60,63,21,1,5,16,0,4,3,0,1,7,4,0,1,14,17,2,0,11,2,4,3,12,7,0,3,9,9,45,10,48,49,7,37,0,2,1,4,29,17,0,3,18,211,59,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627561776600092,0.0689591698444644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219036354719331,0.0,0.0,0.0681995886115328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919769601181225,0.10104043940118264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659353398642053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462529244923582,0.0,0.08449723631215204,0.0,0.0,0.07139002382601513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689586075832662,0.0,0.07138066557004716,0.0,0.0,0.08658740252901882,0.0,0.0,0.14505005860474054,0.08481055148034658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480246759912527,0.0,0.18644787598688645,0.07340321647490172,0.0,0.0,0.1094771545597326,0.0,0.06982629941147729,0.07919122366589751,0.07448327958190082,0.08106827655156576,0.0,0.0,0.16761765082725122,0.11841274469225666,0.0,0.0,0.07574683171270434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182253472810666,0.0,0.08809292775384557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355650764402863,0.0,0.3460025372187152,0.0822412827937073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109256651862196,0.0,0.0934873294720608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926875702139575,0.12146655154904873,0.16612632297346613,0.0,0.07334233168525811,0.06959466315672856,0.0,0.0904685488510671,0.0,0.14959699795084813,0.0,0.055320131904495334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060923129722706276,0.06145123546318134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952140982877036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16847603144035034,0.12606131443568538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236381043872593,0.08658740252901882,0.0,0.07834426568298919,0.0,0.0,0.08431431817509917,0.0,0.15860158593212745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181206744337576,0.0,0.16774914034914115,0.0,0.07544686824339959,0.0,0.09362588132686958,0.0,0.06855558416634103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022025913530659,0.0,0.08196612510601284,0.0,0.058659803134564426,0.0,0.06618459156117072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462433155032775,0.2664491942022785,0.0,0.07630075277675281,0.0,0.0,0.05505889134734553,0.10620672491688177,0.0,0.0,0.09665090197138794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253423620371834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776439705160743,0.06578282390052624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15365309344191813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810033545230095,0.0,0.08445735538525335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05336919368710824
mentalhealth,xxThatOneBitchxox,2020/02/25,Idek what to do I’m getting low again but I’m feeling like I’m slipping into something like a psychosis and idk what to do or if that’s what I’m actually slipping into :/,2.0490990990990987,3.4126526486486526,4.528108108108111,84.56531531531532,76.56756756756756,6.014414414414415,31.25225225225225,6.42735559955562,1.6892954954954955,136,7,28,1,3,48,24,37,0.154,0.642,0.204,0.4588,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,8,4,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,4,8,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,2,3,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.518758452731392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687895840288018,0.3797704147797991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777355987995778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5194193444130808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092465529534252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NovialRiptide,2020/02/25,"Is this a healthy schedule for a 15 year old male high school student? go to school 

go home at 3pm

go sleep until 10pm

study until 4am

play video games until 6am

go to school at 7am

I cannot study during 3pm-12pm because the house is so noisy. I also do not have any friends that I socialize with.",0.8404545454545449,2.445276378787881,2.466666666666669,96.97,80.66666666666666,5.006060606060606,21.60606060606061,5.46131890053228,-0.14155757575757555,235,7,56,1,6,77,48,66,0.079,0.838,0.084,0.0784,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,5,1,1,0,0,2,9,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,9,9,0,13,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,6,25,5,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16508192982401987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403794221565668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583776122243026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15948724159029448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4692755154167796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181045408090017,0.20706603774192636,0.0,0.0,0.23819240808965594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21661347235337525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6267542894793495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20657899794221668,0.21042930376887373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293409830031586
mentalhealth,x-Just4Kickz-x,2020/02/25,"Why don't I feel motivated to do anything? It's getting late, and I just wanted to find a place to post this. I have lots of interests, plenty of things to do, I just don't feel motivated to do anything, I'm 16, and just don't seem to have any drive to do anything. Sometimes I have a hard time getting myself out of bed, and really only get up because I don't want to get yelled at. I don't think I'm depressed, but I guess things can effect people differently. I broke up with a girl, things weren't looking good, did the good thing. I don't think I'm missing her, maybe just the placement she had in my heart. I seem to have a problem where I need to have a project to work on, or a goal to reach, and can't come up with anything. That seems to go with anything, any interest I have, I need to have something to work on, but never able to come up with anything. I don't even feel like playing games with friends (something I love to do), I want to learn more stuff about certain things, like coding, music production, etc. But can't bring myself to do anything besides watching YouTube, or making texting my friends on discord. If I'll be real, I don't even have the motivation to jack off. I'm not sure if I should tell my mom, and if so, what would I tell her? Sorry for the rant, and I'm sorry if this isn't the place I should post this, I just feel like I should try to talk to people about it.",4.087664783427498,4.019763101694917,4.961666666666666,88.6802777777778,70.52542372881356,7.6403013182674195,28.25329566854991,6.937597516519254,1.1797645951035785,1085,35,248,8,18,354,132,295,0.14,0.747,0.113,-0.3942,1,0,2,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,0,7,11,17,0,0,11,0,34,2,1,5,3,61,66,16,0,14,15,1,5,3,2,4,0,1,1,1,13,14,0,0,15,2,0,5,14,4,0,0,3,8,31,13,44,58,3,24,0,3,2,1,12,14,0,11,6,162,44,8,0.08747623424331227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897367794668252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5038984112683029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0533247004696714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507060602509772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534315237358317,0.0,0.0,0.09139404641687957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755912447952284,0.11555445541938787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769224496006798,0.12498607844400067,0.0,0.0,0.07995169333278429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516784316440375,0.0,0.1828108877748315,0.0,0.04971475981108358,0.14674183000293495,0.0,0.0,0.09636493417685968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836152379854916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365975875997156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867700242302736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12820940836805408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345800531181754,0.0,0.0,0.07436916617392482,0.07895071670479742,0.0,0.058391065621502015,0.0,0.08788163490242636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245110830450456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297250385681533,0.06746706458722504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665296179721216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129001307847764,0.0,0.1827880928337591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755610348108738,0.0,0.0,0.08370294224736471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995671055537804,0.05603951561326002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389052348325569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346869576452707,0.08651623242815368,0.19584496490121425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013935970291277,0.0,0.0,0.08244531553561303,0.0,0.0,0.07031008354391373,0.15291616879950526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29057661533239704,0.11210247753517223,0.0,0.0,0.051008095652516634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059390620960386414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478724816335185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893369534673374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736748073210574,0.0,0.0,0.06214060699067703,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ab3s,2020/02/25,"My mind is suddenly all over the place Ok so idk if this is the right subreddit for this (if not, please guide me). Basically i am sick and last night i ended up vomiting. This morning i feel like my mind is all over the place. Everything seems wrong and nothing feels right. Watching youtube videos and 5 seconds in i find myself not paying attention anymore and thinking of some other odd thing. It is a really weird feeling that i can't really describe, it's like it's not my brain or my life or something, everything looks out of place.",3.018857142857143,5.3487524571428615,3.901190476190479,85.79464285714288,76.80952380952381,7.628571428571428,26.690476190476193,8.548686976883017,2.054219047619048,428,17,83,9,10,137,71,105,0.134,0.7829999999999999,0.083,-0.675,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,4,1,6,4,1,0,2,24,12,9,0,2,7,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,7,1,1,0,4,2,0,1,0,5,11,3,8,12,3,14,0,0,2,0,0,10,0,6,6,54,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162345865831892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819295543137496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14434394996326844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29293568585638524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472091309402162,0.11642652812575716,0.0,0.0,0.148952558371242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284313146820936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511124993897122,0.15923881523640124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685461017692824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32910854158776937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529372608320281,0.0,0.15637508753117568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5108100829221113,0.1788932389519913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088068150285805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783527185523605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836269441045852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546305202691527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082707031018414,0.10442524812524248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17818322502833614,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Geeky_Ken,2020/02/25,"About making decisions ranging from the banal to the life altering I've been having this issue where I feel someone will tell ""why did you do that?, you shouldn't have done that"" or ""if see you take any action on your own, things won't be pretty"" whenever I decide to do anything.

I am 25 years old, I have a job that I'm doing fine in, during childhood my parents were always critical whenever I want to buy something with my allowance that I saved, for example if I want to buy a game and I saved the money for it, I felt like I  had to take permission from them and they would start lectureing me about how I should save money for the future and I get this feeling of guilt taking over and I would decide to follow their words and when I say no they would tell me: ""you're on your own"" in a way that makes me feel guilty for not listening to them and they still do it to this day in anything that involves money. 

I always have this feeling that someone is breathing down my neck whenever I decide to do something that I've always wanted to do(I hope I used that term correctly) and they would go into a burst of anger if I didn't listen to them. I feel like this is going to negatively affect my life when I would get engaged and I wouldn't be able to make decisions without asking that person because they think they're more experienced than I am or something like that.",6.945781330582773,5.777449129963903,7.121374419804024,79.24636281588448,64.92057761732852,9.935946364105213,31.338060856111397,8.841846274778883,2.335987313047963,1087,32,218,14,14,352,138,277,0.059000000000000004,0.831,0.11,0.8696,2,0,3,0,0,0,20.0,0,5,9,0,7,11,1,1,8,0,31,4,2,7,1,53,60,16,0,15,7,1,6,3,0,10,2,4,0,1,19,10,0,0,12,1,5,4,8,2,0,0,7,12,43,9,34,41,4,24,0,0,1,0,24,9,0,6,13,159,62,2,0.11355353594843698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834569154796109,0.0,0.0,0.07722029836160461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868897693945128,0.0,0.1061572275112002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922118154835177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323263663709731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620469222084935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870803983876377,0.08112266877063269,0.1090292020828962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11865407156739867,0.0,0.12907018264351913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278428300683525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118520389395331,0.11268436283078792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041244123480464,0.16642956556126215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273936010097172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191553342171124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608776351576895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915056762611288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155247692926348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903023294914007,0.0,0.0,0.09048746632504416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924270850279169,0.26225717909079616,0.0,0.0,0.08037377720114572,0.0,0.09068400049150392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561343813639309,0.0,0.19850159098726175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754399235868915,0.07276052074493727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807379608729176,0.0,0.0,0.20093045271916904,0.09013351135383688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246440407079543,0.0,0.0,0.10946155648691328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4033258696383015,0.0,0.0,0.07312475415187533
mentalhealth,Robotalderson,2020/02/25,"Is there something wrong with my mind? Hello, 
Ive been having some problems recently that are really starting to worry me. Brief back story: I was an alcoholic and drug addict for an intense 5 years. Ive now been clean for four years. Ever since i got clean ive noticed a lot of mental health problems that i never knew i had. I think i am depressed, but im not sad. Im just contemt being alone now that im not partying. Ive found no way to have fun without drugs and alcohol, so i just go to work and then come home and keep to myself. I also think that i have severe anxiety, im constantly overthinking things and playing out every possible negative outcome to a situation, to the point that i cant sleep at night.

These problems are not the reason im posting though. I will have my first psychiatry appointment next month to address those issues

The thing that worries me is the possibility that my conscious mind may be losing control. Before i explain let me say: I AM NOT SUICIDAL
However, i bought a gun recently. I figured its better to have it and not need it than the other way around. But i keep having weird thoughts, the recurring one being: ""Fuck i hope i dont end up using that thing to shoot myself""

The first time the thought popped into my head i thought it was weird but didnt think too much into it, but it KEEPS popping into my head and now its making me wonder... if i ""HOPE I DONT END UP SHOOTING MYSELF"" then why is this thought so persistent? If i truely dont want to do it then the solution is simple: dont. Its making me wonder if theres a struggle going on between my conscious and subconscious mind. Maybe my subconscious mind wants me to die, but my conscious mind, the interface i need to perceive reality, needs to think otherwise. 

There have been similar but less consequential struggles too. For example, i may deliberate over something for hours, ""is there anything to be gained by doing this?"" And decide there is not, and then when the time comes i do it anyways. 

Are weird thoughts like this just a symptom of severe anxiety? Or is there something wrong with me? Why do i feel like there are two different people riding around in my head? 

PS please do not think that i posted this because i want you guys to tell me that im not alone or that things will get better. With a long wait ata my local psychiatrist i am genuinely asking for a non sugar-coated response to the question: is there something wrong with me? 

Thank you for reading, i hope this made sense. Ive not tried to articulate these thoughts to anybody else yet",4.081163352345719,5.74788208216433,4.9835671342685375,82.12195262319513,71.86573146292585,7.843399619752326,28.22573351831869,8.463088693708992,2.080835630234828,2025,77,382,34,39,659,236,499,0.161,0.728,0.111,-0.9698,2,2,8,3,0,0,56.0,0,2,0,9,27,25,1,2,21,0,53,12,4,6,2,103,98,30,2,15,24,0,1,2,0,4,7,1,4,1,34,22,2,5,25,2,1,6,19,15,0,5,18,2,59,10,46,71,4,54,0,3,0,1,9,14,1,15,32,279,93,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060956698103831024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951440672081175,0.0,0.11582423395920155,0.0,0.04471600836683683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555118034745057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0460141071145559,0.09955419726087307,0.05227391583295587,0.0,0.0,0.04299595575045169,0.0,0.03408587717435,0.0,0.04758040117652325,0.0,0.0,0.09890632352013597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633337297537484,0.0,0.06042533602928552,0.06271455335865841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816037249369886,0.0,0.058031984374013273,0.05842032328722421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621325619855023,0.0,0.12968962546013174,0.0,0.04671064653459309,0.0,0.09904996596586216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050579227061857926,0.047111645186514194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028272811817779457,0.03994640458195278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512424923688953,0.0,0.06130901249804702,0.0,0.05169344487596418,0.029213804353063574,0.0,0.06355670755756798,0.0,0.04472113659292869,0.0,0.0,0.05536563527202977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172157856268879,0.05943609772764553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608831133744413,0.16661162660519427,0.055066000727992837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3623932787039569,0.0583617809638729,0.0,0.14910214118780454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05717790273246864,0.0,0.054635470463512484,0.0,0.0,0.049483904154021034,0.0,0.06255570595382913,0.0,0.047537787206230656,0.0,0.052909075178284214,0.07464873401345871,0.0,0.056175141853237215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056350180661647875,0.0,0.2822961219680356,0.0,0.04463162109261646,0.0,0.041104696874088464,0.12438302584334625,0.04312586956099338,0.0,0.059467304833226216,0.052473382099420936,0.0,0.0,0.0636607414047068,0.0,0.0,0.037890131571950224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0387651168394249,0.0,0.0,0.0613789813643962,0.05285869763059951,0.12607378643114509,0.1071041508487674,0.0,0.0,0.1605121932301198,0.0,0.0,0.06263872169672641,0.0,0.055931135877350296,0.0,0.03582122410964236,0.05749096512779625,0.1104206168056565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04446665085385066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633833780459955,0.0,0.04625429650462037,0.06285193152358283,0.0559563860820148,0.0,0.0,0.17218748740631673,0.0,0.0,0.039577635579698615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691109653804165,0.0,0.06116303307374521,0.0,0.0,0.05811813823241041,0.0,0.0,0.04887305227937108,0.051479944126775035,0.0,0.0,0.14859243439113828,0.17914358855036988,0.05493719023771685,0.2663463687986486,0.0652101434418012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03796329643737018,0.0,0.0546218112024207,0.0,0.0,0.048293474521503205,0.0,0.0,0.09894212405473184,0.08876704293623601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091099324736284,0.0,0.0,0.053901032693582235,0.1212770427028102,0.04070751702309282,0.11357083301044907,0.0,0.0,0.18340611829490028,0.0,0.07201614686927317
mentalhealth,arga1234,2020/02/25,"Several months ago I was assaulted and knocked unconscious. Two times in the past week after smoking marijuana (new user), I have ""blacked out"" and woken up minutes later not remembering anything about myself, specifically since the assault. Was I just too high or is there a bigger problem here? # I will try to keep this succinct, but there is a lot of context. First I should preemptively clarify that I have no memory at all of being randomly assaulted in the bar. Thankfully the assaulter was caught and is facing charges. I am new to smoking weed as of a couple months ago (this is after the assault). I have gotten high with no abnormal experiences maybe 10 times before these two instances. I am a male in his mid twenties who is in a high level graduate school (so there are other stressors in addition to the assault). I also sustained a broken bone on my jaw that needed surgery to fix. I now have a scar under my jaw/top of my neck that is not at all visible from a front view but is noticeable from some angles on my side.

When I ""woke up"" from blacking out for the first time while I was high, I was alone in my apartment. The best depiction is it felt like I relived the experience of waking up in the ER after the assault with no memories or understanding of why I was there. Sitting in my apartment, I suddenly started regaining the memories of who I am and what has happened in my life. For example, one moment I thought to myself ""do I have a scar on my jawline?"" and I touch my jawline and I realize I do and more pieces of the puzzle start filling in over the next minute or two. I'm hit with a ton of sadness from all these sudden realizations while simultaneously freaking out that I'm seemingly having a severe lifelong case of amnesia.

My initial rationalization after all the pieces of the puzzle filled in is that I'm depressed and that has caused me to live in a haze as if im in autopilot the past several months. Ive never had depression in the past and I'm not even sure what it would feel like, but in that moment I told myself (Im still high by the way) this must be what depression feels like. The next day I saw the school counselor/therapist and told her what I had experienced (she was aware of the assault and I had seen her three prior times in the past several months). I did slightly lie, telling her that I was drunk instead of high. She talked me through it and said she was not ready to try to give me some specific disorder but if she had to she might use the term ""adjustment disorder"".

Fast forward to a week later and it happens to me again, this time its when Im high with some of my classmates (my classmates know what happened to me and are obviously very supportive). It feels like my sober brain is trying to shield me/protect me from the pain of what happened to me by making me live in a haze, as if nothing happened to me. And then when I'm high the veil over that facade gets lifted as a result of regaining my memory after sever long term amnesia. Ive never had symptoms of amnesia when I'm not high and to my understanding it is  very abnormal to have this sever of memory loss from weed. Can anyone confirm?. So is this all explained by me just being too high or do you think there might be a larger clinical and psychological/mental health issue that I'm facing?",6.1599359338253175,6.2489529106317425,6.9253349282296695,75.8308391452437,66.11864406779661,10.221409455842995,33.257683886140626,10.001912283498694,3.204590755007704,2625,105,499,55,38,872,273,649,0.11800000000000001,0.836,0.046,-0.9933,0,1,0,0,0,0,64.0,0,1,0,4,23,24,8,0,42,0,57,14,7,4,10,85,100,42,0,8,18,0,5,4,0,6,5,1,0,1,34,25,2,1,14,2,0,5,10,16,1,7,26,12,69,8,92,63,16,108,1,5,5,0,20,48,0,17,59,376,103,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587127850777337,0.0,0.0,0.05600704445157224,0.0,0.0432450340086941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03781161302608715,0.0,0.04450043060025095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046015199973709335,0.0,0.056750050880050765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060367364955933825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05555155982245542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059834724539974925,0.0,0.03487493055292118,0.0,0.13972827779766636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239529271964144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03571708142220737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579457407327672,0.0,0.0,0.08202825475057743,0.11589699222478715,0.051922012172305805,0.0,0.0,0.09199504927974808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02825278930103524,0.05187519806593471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390987747391007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057480892446615285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5713489232159145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523600869635692,0.056441916324142034,0.0,0.04806576288845553,0.0,0.0,0.02971908274733486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03819589874669644,0.10567637249249112,0.0,0.09550124938665333,0.047856085464253066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045973987829292726,0.0,0.0,0.03609654751196592,0.0,0.05432720872483155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473344467473713,0.0,0.0,0.17265369092691946,0.0,0.0,0.040097110476800576,0.0834144085724256,0.10445502611414527,0.11502214593132135,0.0,0.0,0.051887951985694174,0.06156656257151453,0.0,0.0,0.036643700729739166,0.0,0.05754131046136636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064889177916218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051743998838937766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061258241275832036,0.0,0.05143922588457103,0.0,0.0,0.1094568036308707,0.0,0.04922930171024417,0.0,0.3665469648011166,0.0,0.044732718738687935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655138547192472,0.0,0.043185639144394786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06136547991367367,0.05096655143547156,0.05620628844515898,0.0,0.04346471920318227,0.047265328125699946,0.04978646386020305,0.0,0.06278709550975578,0.0,0.034650098979075165,0.0,0.04293077653644082,0.15766248899711435,0.0,0.0,0.10334500910163244,0.0,0.1101433763081888,0.0,0.15847492895745555,0.11259128638275201,0.0,0.04670481611299832,0.0,0.08923770955073884,0.0,0.04292348457331998,0.08675396637040624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04879571650306055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03841446202063123,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LordsSpaghetti,2020/02/25,"I think I'm becoming a travis bickle type of character Although I am 15 years old I feel like I have nothing to lose my grades have dropped, I spend most my time in isolation, and all I wanna do is beat the shit out of my step father. I dont want this to become a pity show I just want some advice I don't wanna lose myself in the streets.",7.770225225225222,4.055934851351353,8.22189189189189,80.0496846846847,65.35135135135134,11.488288288288288,34.126126126126124,8.841846274778883,2.520888288288288,265,7,62,3,3,89,52,74,0.10400000000000001,0.7390000000000001,0.157,0.688,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,1,5,1,0,4,0,7,1,1,0,1,12,12,2,0,4,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,1,1,2,4,0,0,0,1,13,1,9,12,3,9,0,3,0,0,1,4,1,2,4,40,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22506760808572174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.50874423753384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699352072995022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164575245618544,0.16454180159877396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252350287019848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.515341927046743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22099979310345244,0.0,0.2416837816026747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23642181911058735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14758078537193042,0.0,0.0,0.13430238086153085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716993017077035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483195631006254
mentalhealth,WeatheredTiger,2020/02/25,"Can TIA (minor stoke) Cause Borderline Personality Disorder? I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder with element of Histrionic Personality Disorder in 2014. I had a minor stroke (TIA) in 2013, since i recovered after a few minutes, I just stopped drinking coffee, stopped smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol and weight loss stuff. Nothing else happened so I didn't think much of it.

Recently however due to stress and other elements my behavior has devolved to that of a toddler but with adult rage. I was never like that as a teenager or young adult and then I reflected on my life events and noticed that my shift in backwards maturing happened after my minor stroke.

So is it mere coincidence that my mental health devolved? Is it just my inability to deal with stress and emotions? Is there anything I can do aside from psychotherapy and pills? Because been there, done that got on Epillim and that shit made me worse and the government therapy was inconstant at best.",8.460446570972888,9.907150812865495,8.276236044657098,63.414258373205755,61.33918128654971,12.300053163211059,41.86124401913875,11.911945987284742,5.8038491228070175,803,45,119,26,11,258,107,171,0.196,0.76,0.044000000000000004,-0.9764,1,0,4,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,6,7,2,2,5,0,14,11,1,2,1,24,19,15,0,0,4,0,3,1,0,0,7,0,0,5,11,13,4,2,2,2,0,0,2,5,0,0,9,3,15,2,20,10,3,17,0,1,0,0,6,7,1,1,11,87,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13892216761396342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10697253455155306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924206080269043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364188322828137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13353783485561976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13401628785198855,0.0,0.13193938369347016,0.0,0.0,0.4469470949527106,0.0,0.0,0.1330271902407556,0.0,0.2546858063422224,0.0,0.0,0.10859183332423047,0.14622376954263733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396666651515793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22990341079412585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13817566864768685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181736093999876,0.06350764057366251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230017972207772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100159985300547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555925089772288,0.0,0.1002580265263865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473105679493572,0.14799702279430416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3405126205319788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835165112559951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343516268922706,0.10753092130376407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173586606979201,0.29781133533774395,0.0,0.14881001037847186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14865745132961308,0.0,0.0,0.08329377626815483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829552389786375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247319450185105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moneymoneynofunny,2020/02/25,"Mental health I’ve always had issues with my mental health. I never really knew how bad my mental health was until high school, because my mom never really explained anything past my Tourette’s syndrome and ADHD. I learned in high school I was diagnosed with some mood disorders.(it was never specific on the sheet but it’s bipolar disorder and depression) I catch myself driving down the road after sing with a song turnt up having fun by myself to completely sad and telling myself “I should die” or “I don’t deserve life” in my head. I feel lost most days. I feel like I’m drowning around everybody I feel overwhelmed, and uncomfortable. Then I have days where I’m super confident, charismatic and an all-around fun loving person. Ive been told I’m a fun person to be around but when I get in my slumps. I hate who I am. The scariest thing about it all is walkin outta the house everyday not knowing who I’ll be.... I have so much to be blessed about I started a clothing line at 19 years old I’m alive and I have some nephews and nieces I love so much but I just can’t look at the bright side and idk why... just wish it could be different.",1.6368666011143915,4.235870539823015,2.816037364798426,89.7815519501803,84.75221238938053,5.826024254342839,21.64470665355621,7.242747475848597,0.8693931825630945,906,30,178,14,27,290,135,226,0.113,0.672,0.21600000000000005,0.9840000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,11,16,1,1,9,0,20,9,1,1,4,38,39,18,2,3,7,2,3,1,0,1,6,1,0,2,6,13,0,0,7,2,0,2,6,6,0,0,8,6,28,9,21,25,6,31,1,4,2,2,11,15,0,4,15,113,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13269296703777098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187107457812484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085912005117508,0.2948684868970101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218885182745476,0.06730572427546203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11576418281188992,0.0,0.0,0.08815446577673257,0.0,0.0,0.14241235238143474,0.0,0.09509712000322768,0.11206517965324783,0.1145895327691458,0.1153563439526842,0.12654095410899316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16748186355592384,0.07887787891849192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057685364843836816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900833358539223,0.11331388213578865,0.3520862542457903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333112722971793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739985508048834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524074670829546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067918154337314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798679030465493,0.05394140059632256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271771257589373,0.0,0.12052701355334405,0.0,0.19930107897766708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3338059663026116,0.0,0.0,0.12931241969526575,0.0,0.0,0.16233006884832213,0.0,0.2554680817775181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585812162373375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540011140229498,0.0,0.19281383579785505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14146465533516656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234843287439806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781497103382879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650437230616228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335238409293153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550276100701428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996290553581673,0.0,0.1269675848893009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07110127898090261
mentalhealth,ReneHinata,2020/02/25,"Life, Longing and Lonliness Life, Longing and Loneliness 

Everyone’s concerned,
Everybody listened,
Some advised,
But I feel imprisoned. 

I am alone,
I feel it every day,
A wrenching feeling inside my head,
Wishing someone would stay.

Friends are distant now,
I remember the past,
They’re all moved on,
And I wish I could move past.

This life I have,
It may be one,
But for all of you, 
(I apologise...)
I may be done.",4.672938596491228,6.543259013157897,5.1868421052631595,80.43622807017546,70.71052631578948,8.750877192982456,36.35087719298246,9.2995712137729,3.6444456140350887,319,18,57,7,6,102,56,76,0.133,0.745,0.122,0.0516,0,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,10,4,1,0,2,18,16,5,0,4,2,0,3,0,1,3,3,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,4,11,1,3,9,3,10,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,3,6,39,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778185617442901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13708010957794667,0.0,0.0,0.11072553555677507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17569798618783905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14465582377905695,0.16405669199159978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604341369013705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13264689567206492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762029778413816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638081519660031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038796412591782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36495757288524666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11634126072095376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3277941439097881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19449075496336732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14547197140347096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829981821149044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3948689450073534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196330753706724,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,melancholic_throw,2020/02/25,"I (F21) am emotionally exhausted from my relationship (M28) Hey all, 
I'm a 21 yr old college student who feels like I've been running on fumes for the past several months. I've been with my bf for about 2 years now and we've loved each other deeply since the first few weeks of knowing each other. We moved in to live together approximately 6 months ago and since then my mental health has gotten bad. 

He is someone who has struggled with depression and alcoholism. He is an incredibly sweet and loving person, but he is really reserved and doesn't have many friends. Him and his friends were part of band, a culture that he was a part of for his late teens and early to mid twenties. He left it in order to start working on fixing his drinking issue, and as a result, left his friends as well. I know I'm one of his only friends. 

He is really loyal to his family, and while he had a generally good childhood, there are moments that he talks about when he is drunk that lead me to be inclined to believe that he is not over these incidents and that they left a lasting impact on him. I don't want to get into specifics. 

He takes Lexapro daily and therapy is something that he has been good about going to until about 3 weeks ago. I made the decision to break up with him because I felt I couldn't handle the relationship anymore. There were several nights where I would cry all because he would be out drinking. Earlier that morning he was out drinking a lot and he crashed his car into a parked car because he was blacking out. 

I moved out because I was realizing that my focus became less on school and more on this relationship, but it's hard. It's really hard. I'm involved on campus, volunteering in the community, and taking up a job while still looking out for my friends' mental health as well. And of course trying to be healthy and connected with my family. 

In the past few weeks he opened up a lot more about his feelings, his past and his tendencies. He has an incredible understanding of how people are and the human condition. He is the guy that talks to the homeless and the drug addicts to understand where they are coming from. 

I don't think Im really looking for solutions, I just came to vent. I am back with him but living separate from him. It's hard for him. We live in a city where housing is ridiculous expensive, the kind where just sharing a room costs a lot. 

He's good about his job, he's a really good worker. I feel that I can't tell those around me the full extent of my situation. 

People tell me that I'm good, I have a lot of good people in my life. A lot of people call me an angel. I'm just really tired.",4.787851690294438,5.6076973053435095,5.6744296619411125,81.04548854961834,69.26717557251908,8.889334787350055,29.09356597600873,9.081645337920577,2.273318276990186,2084,74,415,38,35,685,234,524,0.087,0.809,0.10400000000000001,0.9386,2,0,6,0,0,0,49.0,2,0,2,4,23,26,2,1,31,0,40,14,0,4,2,73,68,31,0,4,7,0,7,1,6,2,8,0,1,3,22,39,5,0,11,5,2,9,6,6,2,2,14,11,48,20,70,48,18,74,1,1,3,2,68,35,0,5,29,272,70,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864380788454942,0.0,0.0,0.11163367905382122,0.06729304760245622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062446784209650004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05605437469099412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04841807739191018,0.05257518526698572,0.1535374767410756,0.0,0.0,0.07094274631862263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429680011357505,0.0720179807776416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542408771561782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916678008815476,0.0,0.0,0.054233766918848805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850523683608412,0.07302224375359463,0.0,0.0,0.0708298988811218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11872020376326385,0.0,0.0955146943558135,0.04498395430033501,0.06045862048456794,0.0,0.0,0.053560075372329465,0.0,0.0,0.24324245369882014,0.0,0.03289789040365488,0.0,0.03578584929194185,0.316884625406842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0623476689066331,0.0,0.0,0.16921938423908126,0.0,0.0,0.13386289614553087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265597576136702,0.0,0.0,0.06801564437221101,0.0657216516790378,0.12497094350469795,0.0,0.0,0.06557090283415809,0.06921052054022489,0.05132687069930148,0.07103001906696874,0.0,0.20524293518517092,0.0,0.0444757675941,0.03076271234205533,0.0,0.1668042189883414,0.0,0.1057535877620514,0.0,0.0,0.26766334412362186,0.11366115255207528,0.05958131763798846,0.0,0.06383910469494633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269127461270645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052002549872438,0.1338488549992788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059090680301445486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607373981024818,0.0,0.042668369404047314,0.04788957829119436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637521060579413,0.1803286495369812,0.17461478824952018,0.054980742997449004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24203134052142602,0.0,0.0,0.2028104086050206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372641461016405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227057663031786,0.0,0.10417464009254136,0.07077804485618168,0.0,0.0,0.053352110638254235,0.04847541440609807,0.0,0.0,0.04456868068263687,0.0,0.050285881809624726,0.0,0.0,0.06582724376457798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468736240747476,0.10122169202738007,0.11007264224457212,0.0,0.07200875944134047,0.0,0.0,0.04034699535481405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237181355075614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04275076092330631,0.0,0.0,0.13110265893961034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037139829674574736,0.0,0.151526055391887,0.0,0.11323058779244505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04584104889064835,0.0,0.0,0.0894605306403345,0.0,0.0,0.040548969219587686
mentalhealth,throwaway244019,2020/02/25,"I'm scared I'm going to be involuntarily hospitalized soon, what should I expect? I'm considering confiding in my sister that I have been self harming again because I know I need help but I'm scared of what is going to happen.",5.224,6.138104733333333,7.304444444444448,69.41000000000001,68.33333333333334,9.555555555555557,28.333333333333336,9.725611199111238,2.611666666666667,183,6,34,4,3,65,31,45,0.18899999999999997,0.768,0.043,-0.7391,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,14,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,0,4,11,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,20,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20497700753227707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3822012165659567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973478521929337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253836275495471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18479612523541214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493277034236021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6732968101227558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3507857259773889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Retroanalyst,2020/02/25,"Do I Have A Mental Disorder? I have been having a lot of weird moments for the past several years, and it’s been getting progressively worse, so I’m curious to see if it could be considered a mental disorder or just me overreacting.

What’s basically been happening for a while is that I start remembering a bunch of things at once, and they’re all negative and they run through my head before I can deal with them (things like people I know hurting themselves, getting yelled at by my parents, the abnormal way that I act, etc).

I can’t handle them and sometimes it’s smaller where I just grab my head suddenly, but for a few seconds, and I aggressively knead my neck with my hand afterwards, or something similar. It used to be a lot smaller where I would remember but I would just end up being unable to move, but now I’m kind of spasming to grab my head and claw at myself suddenly.

When it gets really bad I can’t stop myself unless I give up and forget it, even though I don’t want to. I would grab my head and start talking to myself, repeating words and arguing with myself like part of me wants to be nice to people, and really friendly, and it’s arguing with another part that loves to see people in anguish. When I feel more like I’m in control and can care about my friends having to deal with their problems, I start crying while these thoughts rush through my head, but when I am more arguing with myself I end up not caring about them and thinking of ways to manipulate or use them and to play around with their emotions and I start laughing.

Recently, I had one where I really cared about my friends, but I had too many memories rushing through my head and I think I just couldn’t hold it back anymore and I gave up and started saying things like “I give up. I want to forget. I want to forget” and I was repeating things again and then I was able to forget and not care and I went into laughing again.

Now my memories are all jumbled. I keep on mixing up my age, my birthday, and my memories feel like I have an armful of balls and the top ones are rolling off and when I try to reach them I drop others and it feels weird.

If this anyone can explain this it would be a great help because it’s starting to affect life outside my house where I start remembering in public areas and I don’t want people to see that.

Tldr: I feel overloaded with memories sometimes and feel like I have a nice half that argues with a sociopathic half, making me forget normal things.",4.830208603345064,5.706095026476579,5.59358266987595,81.46011787940506,69.20366598778004,8.884305375547738,29.33907301117077,9.095868883498916,2.3362567549219286,1962,71,386,36,33,640,210,491,0.132,0.6970000000000001,0.172,0.9761,1,0,1,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,8,3,25,32,5,1,14,0,36,11,9,6,2,101,81,48,0,15,17,1,9,6,3,4,1,2,0,0,26,39,0,4,13,2,0,6,8,11,0,5,10,14,72,21,60,60,11,63,0,1,3,1,27,22,0,7,38,289,98,0,0.06428512695103869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740856073163877,0.0,0.0,0.06375357200652472,0.044949655467817484,0.0,0.0,0.05722739222479877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04943129454127474,0.053675395812570685,0.039187616716377036,0.0,0.054701908212007294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621718852228185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210123615088536,0.05132644294201615,0.0,0.07061419335870636,0.0,0.13255028627213786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473526497762018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231211527838215,0.11387508328409085,0.0,0.07169490955628086,0.042459720063689234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16252245869194426,0.13777592261579327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489995888486608,0.0,0.10075897668344927,0.12333630299134872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087457940995467,0.0,0.0,0.05684712545791145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3958505190680404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043088965522962576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417640541513787,0.06881855797770703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05713957455724712,0.0,0.06694306725764645,0.03532942457098079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04540648630258436,0.18843879516654047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930583215175736,0.05801983693223984,0.0,0.042910821422009984,0.06517502877870199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295685758868471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832491635228782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298577538719098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684615621632775,0.0871225314683718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138102584726531,0.13922905589617074,0.06136742768850063,0.17826885110201654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061512184596111324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354809531876555,0.0,0.06347380744864936,0.0,0.21846755159691447,0.0,0.0,0.051122113167530334,0.0,0.0,0.153680769469602,0.0,0.0,0.07262389542077592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04948983141405259,0.12715926864203422,0.0,0.3185094061077443,0.0,0.0,0.05374524462850632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05166994996591527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21354090933646225,0.08238262726113478,0.06315981083597835,0.05103521008076313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04364538141319622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104341893685632,0.0,0.0,0.18958516722964935,0.10205308309475053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059592956728740015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551203639515077,0.18266523902248016,0.0,0.0,0.04139751408579103
mentalhealth,rockermelon,2020/02/25,"Hi, I need advice for something serious, please. Hi there,

I'm looking for advice as to how to help a friend who is going through a really hard time right now. She has suffered from depression and anxiety for many years now, but recently she has spun out a little and she's started hearing voices. The voices she hears are people she knows (always the same people) and they're always talking about her negatively. Half of her knows it's in her head, but half or her thinks these people are out to get her and are following her everywhere. She's seen a doctor who said apparently this kind of thing isn't uncommon in people with depression and anxiety. They've changed her meds around a little to try and help the situation and she's currently staying somewhere that's supposed to help her get away from everything, but it doesn't seem to be helping (yet).

I'm mostly posting here because I want advice on what I can do to help her and make things better in any way. I was with her today and she can't get away from the voices, she hears them constantly. She tries really hard to ignore them, but today she was getting really distressed, and I felt so helpless. I was trying to distract her by talking to her and doing stuff with her, but eventually she couldn't deal with it and said she wanted to have a nap. I just want to make her feel better :( it's really upsetting for me to see my best friend so unhappy and distressed, and of course even more upsetting for her.

Has anyone been through anything similar themselves, or had a friend go through something like this? What are some techniques you used to cope? I'm really worried about her.",6.858505625879048,6.870569161392408,6.902869198312242,76.84079465541492,64.66455696202532,10.18677918424754,32.428973277074554,9.861636050157227,3.015985091420536,1309,47,242,25,18,419,158,316,0.162,0.7070000000000001,0.131,-0.8985,2,0,2,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,2,3,13,19,0,5,11,0,22,2,1,4,0,48,54,25,0,5,8,0,4,1,3,0,1,8,0,0,15,21,0,1,6,1,0,3,5,11,0,2,9,15,41,8,45,43,5,29,0,4,3,0,52,12,0,5,12,173,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512976832088032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14265403192180542,0.0,0.0,0.058293445877915365,0.0,0.13115317006914334,0.0,0.0,0.05993834907999445,0.0,0.07054135304113275,0.07631016025392234,0.0,0.0,0.16107602805593407,0.0,0.0,0.05225492889574933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995925028665526,0.15162710574964813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068180395910372,0.0,0.0,0.09263430779736967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837493020297839,0.14766331682640796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773941654125296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056618131919573066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704080666198862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334328154924885,0.0,0.08230592247869084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986842674596436,0.0,0.17914343367902838,0.0,0.09743481786550157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357895377526493,0.0,0.0879748181547417,0.0,0.28984251662592553,0.0,0.2872860125546784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926557705536031,0.09422040550441613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04187911330040607,0.17183059072463128,0.0,0.0,0.07198433016188786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144393106880746,0.08690797705965603,0.0,0.0,0.09521707635442583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356128217009528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23771351562621965,0.0,0.0,0.09409628188485103,0.0,0.0,0.08209734134777591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745764043614873,0.0,0.08463947473451511,0.0,0.0,0.07320554991836924,0.16308123514048142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683088039384136,0.07803748199890881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635436975630528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198494005496272,0.0,0.0,0.06067400062789989,0.09136753527911197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813041751482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377991206281987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389888917686765,0.05492676884298175,0.0,0.0,0.04998479856339383,0.0,0.16250760090294736,0.0,0.0,0.17459747441757267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403570881693043,0.0,0.0,0.15168198931271934,0.06804160405191911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705417456673106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05520172789966455
mentalhealth,seachoir,2020/02/25,"seeing a new psychologist soon, advice? i'm pretty nervous. i want to open up about some things that I didn't have the courage to talk about with my previous psychologist, but i'm so worried about getting told that i can't be helped or something like that",6.3085333333333375,6.648945320000003,6.25,79.93833333333335,65.8,9.066666666666668,32.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.5318666666666667,206,8,40,3,3,65,38,50,0.14400000000000002,0.725,0.131,-0.1688,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,10,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,4,2,7,7,1,4,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,2,3,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353507631674346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929697888652987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300257980750831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766003283520906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314446303376775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3491366431360445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734694077473993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641961307136079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758344586173785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279930255722763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3279224524964809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024159961415561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485151574629597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soup-lass-chicken,2020/02/25,"Can I get some advice? So hi everyone I don’t use reddit to much but I just need some help with something.

Hello there I will refer to myself as J to stay anonymous and I just feel average. The type of average where you wake up and do the same routine day in and day out. I’ve asked people for advice and some is good but I just need some others to give me advice. I would try to look for a girlfriend or boyfriend but I’m to shy to even mutter a flirty comment so I just given up on that. I wake up and go to school board of everything (I’m a junior 17 years old) and I don’t know how to well basically spice stuff up to make life well....interesting so if anyone has advice I’d love some please thanks!

-J",1.0413345864661636,2.749828434210528,3.083759398496241,92.29131578947369,80.44736842105263,5.9218045112781965,18.75187969924812,6.868970318607317,0.017419548872180446,550,12,126,6,14,186,94,152,0.017,0.818,0.165,0.973,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,12,4,0,0,5,0,8,4,2,3,0,32,24,16,0,4,9,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,3,13,4,23,21,7,14,0,0,1,1,9,8,0,7,4,82,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6034924503130732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795664933752272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443385841174338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991441436669003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197651266019016,0.0,0.0,0.14753114209476714,0.1387603675634798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780668056289783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806650714761746,0.14810985617182967,0.08774629787961721,0.12949929131476012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348778634375908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485151354355913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090538307446373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296530052689951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13934761290436634,0.0,0.10305993344838243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349816926555567,0.22896403241011476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620116937315743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703812768933502,0.0,0.0,0.16947946453864016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625609199786633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886089715560187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456464214248828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17674545988668233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214627175526726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048241435309857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13334780116377934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277639488292298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967785486934101,0.0,0.0,0.09942538747164943
mentalhealth,Ben1262002,2020/02/25,"I have almost no emotions and always hear things like ""What is wrong with you?"" And well I don't know it, I hope some of you can help me or give me advice. First of all, im M17 and live with my Dad and his new wife. I have a little Brother and a step-sister(not directly related to me)

My mom was addicted to gambling or something and always sat on the Computer. So as i grew up I was always by myself or with neighbours kids, my Father worked all day. Then as I was around 4 my brother got born and nothing changed in my Mom's behaviour, so I had to ""teach"" my brother how to behave and everything, if he misbehaved I was responsible and everything, with this in mind I got a bit anxious towards my Mom because she screamed/yelled at me if my brother did shit (like throwing a glass of water on the ground), but luckily she never got physical. 

That was my ""great"" childhood, I never noticed that stuff like this were far from normal till about 2 years ago.
Because I am emotionally pretty much always at a ""I dont care"" normal mood, I rarely get angry, sad, feel love or get really happy and if I would need real strong triggers.

I also have few friends because I feel like I don't need them or they hinder my progress, honestly Im not sure why.

I asked one of my friends that I trust to describe me and he said (in German):
""Friendly, helpful but kinda emotionally cold""


I do want to know what is ""wrong"" with me and if there is something I can do to get a bit more open or so. A therapist to ""get over""(not sure how to describe it in English, basically to accept) my past didn't help.
Any advice is appreciated

Now im at work and will be back in around 7 hours, have a good day/evening/night",3.2097106974657983,4.481571900874638,4.520014577259476,86.15326250280333,73.43148688046648,7.3760484413545635,27.47802197802197,7.882392219407189,1.5773427674366447,1314,49,275,18,26,435,183,343,0.052000000000000005,0.725,0.223,0.9969,0,0,2,0,0,0,53.0,0,2,2,5,13,25,1,0,10,0,28,4,1,3,6,60,50,35,0,11,13,10,2,4,4,2,1,2,0,1,11,21,1,0,5,0,1,2,8,4,1,2,14,5,48,20,39,33,8,35,0,1,0,1,32,18,1,14,19,184,59,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866338512693292,0.0,0.158952481946442,0.07209550419851643,0.0,0.08144179040863553,0.0,0.0,0.06504080428396493,0.2706974311593287,0.0,0.0,0.055308237138459074,0.0,0.0,0.09188149169419793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14480463029195295,0.07603401227040799,0.0,0.0,0.06253893505040879,0.0,0.14873685826047664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758595707762734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292292693398202,0.0,0.08603798663776513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490423164210676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531996081071163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744611114914042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619109026847674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224734215594054,0.05810326943649467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918056757794291,0.0,0.0,0.18850964143298587,0.0,0.16996949421154794,0.07802062553402214,0.0,0.06821703818865663,0.19514479033783866,0.08966831153376248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657893818835911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166655816920764,0.0,0.16354445344212715,0.0,0.0,0.08078057197891797,0.08009518530071354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26355606386692965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939537631441145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15893793167885284,0.08151557105873455,0.07181724113088536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340489152091474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212167181121814,0.2857635549811039,0.0,0.0,0.05978804106589384,0.12061261481953264,0.1254557973368941,0.07855050950590899,0.0,0.0763241420666988,0.15937528452750058,0.07803980750989392,0.09259649896090526,0.0,0.0,0.05511235733850956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776401591347607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274341683429426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257309986880212,0.052103068042522266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773649206196584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348565849512991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522598815917235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310515651746462,0.0,0.0,0.15330803052561826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443218820888508,0.05403306218673777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04797145035315993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312682325604379,0.0,0.07338906581350697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842066160577752,0.0,0.0,0.057775593504109,0.17784654579242007,0.0,0.05237484611085616
mentalhealth,thinkaboutnew,2020/02/25,"Filmywap 2020 HD Bollwood, Hollywood Movies Free Download [Filmywap](http://www.alaskarbooks.com/filmywap-2020-hd-bollwood-hollywood-movies-free-download/) is one of the best and free sites allowing users to download Hollywood, Bollywood and Tollywood movies in HD quality. If you don’t have a laptop or PC, you can download all the latest Bollywood or Hollywood Hindi dubbed HD Movies from Mobile too.",15.024499999999994,15.744995116666667,10.696666666666667,53.99500000000002,47.83333333333334,14.66666666666667,50.0,13.5591,7.514000000000001,337,18,38,10,3,94,42,60,0.0,0.8190000000000001,0.18100000000000002,0.8957,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,1,1,7,4,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,4,4,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,3,1,22,2,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8400891215958007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5424484010266748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fogmeister99,2020/02/25,Anyone else incredibly toxic but only to themselves I am a people pleaser if i find someone who is willing to talk to me but i just go off on myself when im alone like god damn i hate myself so much,1.1419767441860458,2.9151840697674416,3.969941860465117,85.7470058139535,80.3953488372093,5.230232558139536,22.377906976744185,5.985473137389443,0.4470511627906975,157,5,32,1,4,56,35,43,0.215,0.601,0.183,-0.3919,0,1,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,5,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,1,5,4,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,2,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33065245307959124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22323089397767665,0.3271150247190211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26669703452625176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917937762925307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18144027847379968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151987463277172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3448507636298505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15597212877126715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346895531257792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428082214917202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213315907858766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705041798057754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566055068193192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OverhaulMyLife,2020/02/25,"How to deal with suicidal thoughts & stress I’ve dealt with suicidal thoughts for years, I can’t actually tell you when they started honestly. But recently they’ve been 1,000x worse than before. I am a college student working on my thesis so I know the increase of them is from stress, but I don’t know how to deal with them. 

Last semester in October the same thing started happening, as well as somatic symptoms that had me forcefully taken to a hospital to ensure I didn’t have a stroke. I’m extremely worried that might happen again this semester, and I really don’t want to go through that again. I lost my most comforting coping mechanism for stress, and I really don’t know how to get out of this cycle I’m in. 

By now I would’ve thought I’d know how to deal with this, but I’m still so lost & scared. Any advice is welcome.",6.6889692101740295,6.185311939759039,7.09971887550201,77.01268406961182,65.14457831325302,11.474163319946456,35.311914323962505,10.980518767755715,3.778007496653279,666,28,132,17,9,218,97,166,0.16399999999999998,0.722,0.114,-0.8292,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,3,3,12,10,0,4,5,0,12,2,0,4,0,25,32,14,2,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,7,0,0,2,5,6,1,0,9,1,16,4,25,22,3,16,0,2,0,0,9,4,0,2,10,84,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.11837679361101007,0.0,0.0,0.11853845497218927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628691928047029,0.0,0.08249198625080233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322215417509427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751823254275125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337718351271192,0.0,0.06894078343338636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21454033104971054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26666560119616883,0.09888027662349652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26483884350522674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12868610070174474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554229819991733,0.0,0.11977467245112595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144809477615165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17172149459341168,0.0,0.09687483058771032,0.0,0.4168655583644028,0.0,0.0,0.2653773349380508,0.0,0.0,0.12608299376751214,0.0,0.0,0.1060264649445167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059006856137348,0.0,0.0,0.2889093541068747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154920184957766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906832708301507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831194135278199,0.1231917527482171,0.12362079755784985,0.0861720371423447,0.0,0.0,0.07811684676278233
mentalhealth,wolffairytail,2020/02/25,"When im trying to sleep... im terrified So... for a few years now (I'm 24 atm) I've been having issues getting some shut-eye, whenever I try to go to bed my anxiety shoots up and I feel as if something terrible is about to happen... a year ago I got a big scare that my girlfriend's period didn't come for around 2 weeks... we were not prepared for it... ever since then I've been terrified to have sex and even when we do it with her on the pill and me using a condom... I spend every night after, until the period comes, with paranoia, thinking of the worst... I'm writing this at 5 in the morning with a university lecture at 10... and I just can't keep going on like this.",2.6857042253521115,3.3575816549295823,4.8226478873239484,85.77833802816902,74.0,7.933521126760564,24.76338028169014,8.238735603445708,1.3342399999999994,513,15,114,8,10,179,100,142,0.147,0.835,0.019,-0.9448,0,0,1,1,0,0,32.0,2,0,0,0,9,4,0,1,9,0,9,4,1,1,1,22,22,11,0,1,3,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,5,12,0,1,2,0,2,4,3,3,0,0,5,1,11,1,23,17,3,26,0,0,0,2,5,8,0,2,15,74,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191431620307496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836202255767686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17264591791420214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341207917035025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12809420558567955,0.17542800451904794,0.16340111118289616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098060869005961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132458915989544,0.0,0.2204388447255028,0.0,0.15510991780729427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17149871370885175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4189725929474303,0.2024208626626233,0.0,0.17238098601298985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947483000051732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18199765490304845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19416574901876774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16042749973846404,0.0,0.1940780379751557,0.0,0.0,0.1493029306373967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12426762561372505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633423136667561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750014499505064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556534802301275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497793990204011
mentalhealth,BulletsChompTwisties,2020/02/25,"I can’t keep a date ... with my therapist I’ve moved to a new city and struggling to find a new therapist that I actually like (by like I mean see/feel progress). I have had a number of traumatic experiences in my 30+ years and the thought of having to start from the beginning is daunting. 
When I start to notice my mental health declining (usually when I start to day dream about dying - no plan just the thought of death) I get the courage (or encouragement from my loved ones) to make an appointment. So today I make the call and her next available appointment is March 10. By the time my appointment comes I will most likely be over this slump and struggle to express what has happened and most likely cancel. Thus the cycle begins again. I’ve asked to be put on a cancellation list and fingers crossed get in sooner. Does anyone else feel this way? Any advice on what to do so I don’t cancel in 2 weeks time.",3.9081085395051858,5.535904379888271,4.624361532322427,84.68096368715086,72.24022346368714,8.019313647246609,26.752194732641662,8.634040054169528,1.848916679968077,720,25,144,13,14,231,110,179,0.087,0.8109999999999999,0.102,0.3906,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,2,7,9,0,2,13,0,12,3,1,3,0,21,30,11,2,0,2,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,8,0,1,5,1,0,4,3,2,0,1,3,2,16,7,24,24,2,31,0,0,0,1,6,6,0,3,24,87,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.13029182688420388,0.0,0.0,0.13046976001993182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09079508967984078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335711241667144,0.13680236454605516,0.0,0.0,0.12481892969265128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363342102403522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501174454668114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861064247617895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385679657260031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684027678283475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153503258357254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060373724361626,0.0,0.0,0.1350188542130277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203070950632397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395126320076076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806727830736252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419206880766223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867467347332505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609156340344696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050291337067418,0.0,0.17824520956582146,0.0,0.0,0.14543747483889716,0.0,0.0,0.13455217819630302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190580173249814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579001220788104,0.14199520396959334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200823353215467,0.0,0.0,0.09047352954842017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342199122108475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639453348666436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835087844926293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791586914151297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31004347419807143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21199271919356436,0.15570787418183818,0.0,0.12655704235207008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470484137407733,0.0,0.0,0.10597835569358076,0.10709804664305624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597957728608115
mentalhealth,iwishitwerentso,2020/02/25,"Is it actually paranoia or being a delusional when there's good reason to be so? Without having to explain ad nauseam the details of my entire story (I will, if truly necessary), how does one cope with justified paranoia or having actually experienced incredibly abnormal events?",13.168510638297867,11.463695319148938,13.911170212765965,37.18250000000003,53.255319148936174,17.059574468085106,53.287234042553216,15.247664890283005,8.813987234042555,228,14,26,9,2,81,42,47,0.076,0.757,0.168,0.7059,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,2,0,8,7,6,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,5,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,24,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.7022532527022383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148757154594904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017949687920026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438193243897669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3699487886273775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468479213460681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Intro-Bert,2020/02/25,"Advice Request. This has been Cross posted to r/schizophrenia. We are struggling with a family member that we strongly believe is an undiagnosed schizophrenic. He's been been showing symptoms for about 5-6 years. My wife was the first to pick up on something being off and I initially dismissed it before realizing that something was off. 

He's dismissed out pleas to seek help. He's been evicted multiple times for his outbursts. Destroyed an apartment. Been kicked out of his father's/grandparents home. Charged with vandalism and uttering threats. The father funded his move to our province a few thousand kilometers away last year. He's essentially wrote him off. Now my wife, sister-in-law and myself are trying to bare the burden of taking care of him and pleading with him. 

The management company of the condo he is currently living in has been forwarding complaints to his landlord.  He's been suffering violent outbursts, threating to burn the building down, hanging out in the buildings laundry room and smoking. Intimidating other residents of the building by screaming at all hours of the night, and so on.

He does NOT trust me. I'm ex-military and with that, he thinks I am apart of a government conspiracy involving Free Masons. The police have been called multiple times to his door. When they arrive and knock he simply ignores them. The landlord whos been really patient through this whole debacle is under pressure by the condo management to address the complaints. She's had enough will be evicting him. We're cosigners on his lease. Due to the potential for violence and us having a small child, we will not take him in. 

We're located in Alberta and have contacted multiple organizations who are useless in terms of recommending resources. 

He's going to be homeless and it's eating my family up. 

What can we do? 

EDIT: probably spelling. This was typed on my phone.",5.641906187624753,8.388280955089822,5.8514011976047895,72.9406546906188,70.28742514970061,8.884471057884234,34.78602794411178,9.473421319101043,3.946014291417165,1525,79,230,37,30,484,197,334,0.147,0.821,0.032,-0.9894,4,0,2,0,0,0,42.0,6,0,2,2,4,15,4,2,20,0,32,3,0,1,1,30,40,13,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,2,1,8,1,11,22,1,1,2,1,2,5,2,11,0,2,14,1,28,5,51,21,5,44,0,2,0,0,43,26,0,0,14,164,39,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16481330939360486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15846230400272346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351785533500944,0.1900228817950934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17222145859579455,0.0,0.17196085075536738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475961378644516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17258202884444915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17427161576151395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3179966440131196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434627273337007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585377734600957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11304972938955593,0.0,0.16918045988406005,0.0,0.1660968409458686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13748100249743436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489305110226331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792596598791382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15827666591426706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615303533304049,0.0,0.1818447889020682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804837984903813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259686533709511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632081093383956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17530307330184314,0.2536237516579141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807098296788728,0.0,0.0,0.19669485127152306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450956174003185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028780866718133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18830367730272604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21722395550689166
mentalhealth,Binkyt11,2020/02/25,"I don't know what this feeling is. What's wrong with me? Hi, um.. I don't really know where to start. I don't know why I felt like this so badly now, but like. Idk. I'm just playing something and I'm hit with this wave of dread when someone across the house yells something about my room. I don't remember, but it triggered something mentally that... I don't fucking know just sent me on a downward spiral. Like I've had this thought of feeling like a burden for a long time. I'm 20, don't have a job, overweight, and autistic. I get anxious as shit and I honestly don't like myself. I usually push that away somewhere, but it comes up every now and then. Tonight it hit me full force to the point I started crying..I waited until I was alone and just broke down into tears for no reason. I've never done this or felt like this unprovoked before. Like I felt disconnected with reality and my own body, had this sense of coolness around me, and just overall felt num. What's wrong with me? Why am I like this? I don't want to tell anyone close to me because I'll just burden them more with my issues.",1.8322798145807009,3.772555637168143,3.0699747155499395,92.22051622418884,78.91150442477877,5.720691108301729,22.708807416772018,6.655083550727371,0.482089591234725,858,27,185,8,21,277,121,226,0.174,0.675,0.151,-0.772,1,1,3,0,1,0,33.0,0,0,1,0,13,20,2,1,6,1,15,4,2,2,1,42,39,16,0,1,9,0,6,8,0,0,1,1,1,0,16,16,1,1,13,1,0,3,10,9,1,0,10,8,25,11,24,27,3,28,0,1,0,1,4,13,2,1,20,113,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768944188439405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283728625398272,0.0,0.07945478425730355,0.0,0.0,0.10115739610251244,0.0,0.0,0.10676187494859844,0.0,0.09487874711890984,0.06926957724930526,0.0,0.09669325093180507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622056455467534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788470437289123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628593624772547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574064146557604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491244378129115,0.08117938534683893,0.4364217175828385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505180942836004,0.05936851403382482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311171404519828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860325243224785,0.112763145634024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24979873843364564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4441224642647423,0.0,0.0,0.10056156407128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451526309235313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764071811086258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741984488449076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279616240871657,0.11683357390766455,0.0,0.0,0.12872395423054395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664256603181634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628080981172814,0.2624405351059389,0.0,0.0,0.16085994038585666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932018627417903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021185066471626,0.06626027321337763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251506145242064,0.0,0.06702364413627844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205072083264808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484795333120949,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SpazzticAng3l,2020/02/25,"Needing to put this somewhere Tw: abuse, suicidal events ... pretty much dont read if you aren't in the right mindset. 

I don't usually tell my story without laughing but because of my current withdrawals from my meds i feel like it is a bit more serious. So growing up there was a lot of stuff that just didnt work: being an accident to druggies, divorced parents, neglect and abuse. I have a memory gap all the way up to 7 or 8 years old. I was never really taken care of i had hygiene issues and bowel issues. I wasn't really fed all that much and if i was it was fast food. I moved around so much i never actually passed any grade in school. I was pumped full of all sorts of adhd and depression meds at the same time. I was in the psych ward for a week when i was 7ish. They didn't know what to do with me. I seemed fine to them. Growing up from 7 i was pulled between two parents who didn't really want me they just wanted to one up the other. I had to be older than i was so there was no properly coping with anything. Egg donor said 'i dont want you anymore' when i was 11. Sperm donor was not much better he is still a child himself so i took care of him more than the other way around. Middle school and high school was tough and i dont know how i managed to graduate. I only joined the military so i could get away from or become something(?) Idk. Being it was lonely and i ended up with two kids that i lost and had a terrible marriage i had to fight to leave TT_TT. Being kicked out didnt help either ... i thought I'd be in the military for life. Sorry if this is muddled this is my mind right now. Med withdrawals and being in the middle of trying to get medicaid so i can talk to a therapist is straining... also im a college student so trying to focus there sucks too. I have a great boyfriend who is so patient with me but i feel so terrible that im not my best self for him. I just want to not feel like this :( anyway rant over for now ... thanks for listening . Ama if ya want ... maybe i just need to talk.",0.7991512279190012,2.8780750094786747,2.746663076260233,92.45283390779841,83.26540284360189,5.637311503662216,20.49138302455838,6.883109765328512,0.3635052132701424,1562,46,342,19,44,522,205,422,0.20199999999999999,0.742,0.055999999999999994,-0.9961,4,2,2,0,4,0,49.0,0,3,3,4,27,21,2,1,19,0,45,5,1,1,5,59,71,30,1,12,17,2,3,2,0,0,1,2,0,3,17,16,3,1,7,1,0,7,17,11,0,3,29,5,49,10,54,35,15,48,0,4,0,0,26,22,1,9,19,249,66,11,0.0,0.19209179982259006,0.07910538306646546,0.0,0.09742146634802352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482571463117041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05512533304227279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039229557322614,0.0,0.0,0.06670759501486595,0.14432576201848338,0.0,0.0,0.07616096079056646,0.0,0.0,0.0494149953754883,0.08952724904051204,0.0,0.0,0.0850701748301311,0.07169326308304505,0.08849934055055754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529740236096652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472187270220083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981907996338092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850142143626419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179738378316633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296302583748292,0.11582224436166198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802119152752613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470370292206425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937177882315417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05433453755206123,0.08564706468672248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512299008438784,0.16921654218746307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909974619936932,0.0,0.0,0.08583356597592988,0.0,0.0,0.05725689640425825,0.0792061623200278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848938008577767,0.0689165053004575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143825551844701,0.0,0.2701267509391373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185009580487508,0.0,0.0,0.08615669204930078,0.23836128911154106,0.12021374943449055,0.1250409155686361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506153980036438,0.0,0.05493010101595744,0.06165174366605593,0.0,0.0,0.1800208003293103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246978471990314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149028089093198,0.0,0.0,0.08108451504967842,0.0,0.1557922902791833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13845399801014965,0.07710907516851813,0.0,0.0,0.2461189710888547,0.0,0.07379632684572487,0.08456594832584058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062405933184425576,0.0,0.0907429197882732,0.0,0.0,0.06473667979487338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279725817565923,0.08866930374214707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031005978734955,0.07085226646854435,0.07463153105736366,0.0,0.09411990137913133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435463244372414,0.04726824133246007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006350724228514,0.11007233924451366,0.0,0.15837272041803546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927897763393962,0.0,0.2390640448925065,0.1286874031069591,0.0650235107448345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814143281874343,0.0,0.05901452250017099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052201642725855465
mentalhealth,Pho_Zenny,2020/02/25,"Just venting Feeling tired. Tired from depression. Tired of trying new medication and waiting for them to kick in. The only effective medication had side effects I couldn't stand. Tired of the promises my psychiatrist makes but can't keep. It's not even his fault, and he tries his best. Tired of trying to figure out what is wrong with me. The more I know myself the more crap I need to deal with. 

I've dedicated the past 12 years to dealing with my mental health and I'm getting nowhere. Everytime I see progress, it eventually slips back into regression. Just typing this out makes me want to break something, and I'm in tears. There is only so much a person can take.",3.1794050480769243,5.7701776015625015,3.8296875000000017,85.14271634615385,77.671875,6.750961538461539,24.68990384615385,7.882392219407189,1.4768237980769232,535,19,101,9,13,169,88,128,0.187,0.682,0.131,-0.7964,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,4,6,6,1,0,6,0,6,9,1,4,0,26,19,6,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,8,0,0,1,4,10,0,2,5,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,2,12,2,18,17,4,12,0,1,1,0,7,6,1,0,4,62,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636968746053476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315242652288448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25841584323033034,0.10794503725276387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277812649197126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336972840710249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547883739061597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332180681162513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139750623184523,0.0,0.0,0.06887712805544817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16731515884784193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525100514143088,0.1263013975134307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213068349746616,0.09292930863459152,0.0,0.12104280389246465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906355618040428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963999489553452,0.0,0.10943179292570236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987038818167887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648380909515653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423124598494856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7202319287055968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552689630072403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392184842668446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702676596696522,0.0,0.08070728333362978
mentalhealth,arabian_bunny,2020/02/25,"#toostressedtobeblessed i'm in high school and getting out of bed every morning is a struggle for me. every day something bad happens that ruins my day, every day is constant stress about grades, my GPA, and the future. not to mention my daily assessing of ""does anyone actually like me?"" ""do my friends actually care?"" ""would anyone care if i just disappeared out of existence?"" ""do my teachers even like me?"". my grades are going down, my happiness is barely there, and my passion for what i used to love is nearly gone. i'm just so so done with life and i feel useless and worthless. all my friends get better grades. (oh, and not mention, their parents are married) i just wish i could be anyone else. i'm losing faith from my religion too, and i come from a very religious family. i'm just so disconnected and i don't know what to do about it. sophmore year is killing me and i don't think i even have a will to live at this point.

general advice from experienced and/or wise people would be greatly appreciated. thank you \~",2.961307692307692,5.528293476923079,4.187884615384615,82.4033653846154,78.33333333333333,6.771794871794873,26.16025641025641,7.908726449838941,1.7742256410256405,808,32,149,14,20,264,115,195,0.11599999999999999,0.687,0.196,0.958,1,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,1,2,13,22,1,2,4,0,20,3,0,1,1,30,39,13,1,5,7,1,1,2,2,3,1,0,1,0,5,13,0,0,3,0,0,4,4,8,0,0,2,2,25,14,21,31,1,18,1,4,0,2,8,8,0,1,8,99,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.2501453749810057,0.0,0.0,0.12524349310441818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688524343898436,0.131322430562258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701424872529526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335346269957393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26134998083650424,0.0,0.0,0.1104046840651719,0.0,0.1385031983786231,0.0,0.10233107083851664,0.0,0.0,0.24797170043660174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11215997022860873,0.13115953237948813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070672398121042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16930643826339142,0.0,0.32395915197138386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082461858881477,0.0,0.06480518142293053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19804330357365224,0.0,0.1339241320146115,0.0,0.07284036675337344,0.0,0.0,0.14130477762590213,0.0,0.0,0.11333782137934913,0.1364363552578592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13541567135881075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14179800436060355,0.0,0.07043733485566676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052827548573887,0.1252320285062178,0.0,0.11317397544487626,0.0,0.0,0.1433862998666465,0.0,0.0,0.11567589146708555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423144950986461,0.0,0.0,0.0888549906479495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115942028718488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297120371299145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866936327418777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146815081223306,0.13398817334356994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799912722794778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212435913049801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106952997134012,0.0,0.10575135314265056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14738594135898808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18209258661525454,0.0,0.0,0.08253546717112847
mentalhealth,shitsaidbyme,2020/02/25,"Working with a narsacistic personality and I need advice I am an LPN working with a narsacistic personality APRN who makes everything about her while talking down to staff.  She makes us feel lower than dog sh*t on the ground and laughs or smiles while doing it. I do realize that she will never change and that no matter what, things won’t be good enough.  I’m tired of being fodder for her.  My question is this. How do I not let her make each day a shitty one? How can I set boundaries in a professional manner when really I want to give her a piece of my mind? I’ve talked to my supervisor who states that she will never change and that I have to respond in a professional manner to her. Just how much abuse am I supposed to take while being professional? I’m not the only one. She does this to the entire staff who are below her.  No wonder no one wants to stay! I don’t see the point of documenting if she will never change.  Any advice on how to get through the day without allowing her toxic belittling snide comments ruin everything?  I need help. Thanks.",3.771278772378517,5.629587690821258,4.721142369991477,82.90196930946294,73.05797101449275,7.382665529980107,23.770673486786016,8.124751697461798,1.3049638533674337,840,24,163,13,17,273,118,207,0.115,0.8029999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.8426,1,0,0,0,1,0,18.0,1,0,0,2,7,4,0,0,12,0,18,1,0,8,3,34,34,14,0,5,6,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,12,7,0,0,4,0,0,0,11,1,0,3,0,2,26,3,25,26,4,20,0,1,1,0,25,8,0,4,9,123,38,7,0.0,0.1479086060381053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439738826039125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489181917394914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3961754115644175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610159991331793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924361310570788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898752801405594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243866057210546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312013236257122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522093414210889,0.11975273806127205,0.0,0.10470535258602466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367401124329893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276518519611149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499842252335597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604737511716246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917678059097132,0.18512657096129265,0.2888404534170607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537734982432223,0.09494235020846054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180015419908172,0.0,0.0,0.11800906158397848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984333889398626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997225114228257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994770260120352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305709014917422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386009485553233,0.20067467027421132,0.0,0.11493094172035632,0.0,0.0,0.08293457144707482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14347902638810092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501606717403126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726138092948776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203361144277372,0.1353778152183769,0.1817621734413712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AbsoloutleyLilCutie,2020/02/25,"Finally, a poem I wrote on one of my lowest nights **Finally**

it’s 1 am

it’s cold

it’s raining

i feel the wind dry each raindrop that falls off of my skin

it’s dark

there are more cars than people

i keep walking

something sharp on my foot

bloody footprints trailing behind

the blood shining in the dark

the ground has a gritty texture to- most likely because there is now dirt in my cut

i look up and see no stars,

i look down and see cars

than nothing a sharp pain like a thousand knives are piercing my brain

then nothing

i wake up

i see bright lights being shone in my eyes

my famliy is surrounding me

my mother is holding my hand and crying

i hear a steady beaping in the back round

and what i think are doctors yelling codes in a language that is foreign to me

i feel shocks in my chest, like i had experienced only once before

my family is ushered out of the room

the doctors are running around, getting supplies and yelling giberish

the beeping in the back round gets quieter and quieter

and then they become less rythmic getting faster and faster

there’s a continuous beep, like a smoke alarm

then that same feeling of nothing that i’ve felt so many times before

i had finally done it",2.993170261941452,5.234524580508474,3.4936363636363663,89.12139445300464,76.5,5.6468412942989215,27.252696456086287,6.574015621080383,1.1683881355932209,955,39,184,8,22,298,135,236,0.115,0.84,0.045,-0.9236,1,0,2,0,2,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,8,9,1,1,17,0,15,11,8,0,0,21,31,12,0,0,0,1,10,4,0,0,3,3,1,0,10,11,0,2,5,0,0,5,1,4,0,2,5,24,26,5,24,25,5,37,0,0,10,0,4,18,0,1,18,118,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265642039332012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19461843295437556,0.0,0.07714376719579752,0.13976464441980538,0.2153696308104094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127176575332684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390093440131692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25905878226557544,0.0,0.1295046909518978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930017289519138,0.0,0.19196260096389586,0.0,0.12150794301526598,0.4158883509718676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19835161439931076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426311616182189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124835447180701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473039489352941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21254042537624895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830193995906836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875869739095404,0.0,0.36428470600101903,0.0,0.0,0.134771727803935,0.08575362382647574,0.0962470546531384,0.13465823029664256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877339061418921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025321388702729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742445070841514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108819508479034,0.0,0.0,0.07379238179418814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xkaydra69,2020/02/25,"Lately I feel like I’m falling apart I’m 15 years old and I just feel like I’m falling apart 
I had a cold sore and then I touched my genitals at some point? And now I have a bump and chances are it’s genital herpes which gave me an anxiety attack last night, I’m horrified and I’ve been upset all day over it trying not to cry over the fact that I might have genital herpes. And I feel like I have nobody to talk to about this cause none of my friends would understand  I know them they’d either judge me or make fun of me

I’m also struggling in school and it’s only the first semester I just feel like there’s so much pressure i just feel like breaking down 

I’ve had depression and anxiety since I was 10 and honestly it’s gotten better but I’ve been in a dark place all day and all of yesterday I’m constantly thinking about it trying not to have another anxiety attack

I just feel like there’s nobody",1.358725328947365,3.412602005208335,3.1625109649122827,90.38753289473685,81.03125,6.958771929824562,22.084429824561404,8.032893268588372,1.1053291666666665,723,23,157,14,19,241,101,192,0.147,0.738,0.115,-0.5912,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,2,2,11,16,2,3,6,0,13,1,0,2,4,37,31,15,0,1,9,0,7,6,1,2,1,0,0,0,8,10,0,0,9,0,0,2,3,6,0,1,7,8,20,10,15,21,7,25,0,1,0,0,5,10,0,3,18,93,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366773587323457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281959794538763,0.26880928073976423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665014880864591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359076901134563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032338399247973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265744555911697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286603176721369,0.15107657369267802,0.0,0.1008827311527647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35534257637881816,0.502060368551506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962956643586247,0.0,0.0,0.090493301334407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437084065218952,0.09547547942628247,0.13212621443077996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3433388401779796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818428071086136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425498369892687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861030317904435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991729974066923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229068107975798,0.0,0.0,0.08908161328714115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237450548817365,0.0,0.110724429775761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854044293228785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689002632914433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244829213442344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414356888491496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505130689690162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590453241890938,0.0,0.0,0.12193505122931685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320482951955815,0.0,0.0,0.07542700779797183
mentalhealth,Jumpy-Spend5,2020/02/25,"I'm fixed by Lithium dosages so low they're not even prescription, but without it look like I have Bipolar-2? With depression and anger cured, I'm just hypomanic 24/7/365 instead of seasonally? What is this? 25-50mg of Bicarbonate or equivalent dosage (Citrate, Orotate, etc), made a big enough difference that my coworker commented on the improvement in my ""mental health"". They don't even make Lithium Bicarbonate pills this small (google says 150mg). More had no major benefit, less leaves me dangerously nonfunctional with only sociopathic anger issues or suicidal depression for my daily moods. I'm not exaggerating on those, my sibling is so bad they can't hold a job due to literal murderous intent punctuated with self-harm.

The lithium is the difference between me being motivated to allahu-akbar and poisons sombody's drink due to hyperfocused anger of minor slights, and being able to work with them like a normal person in a forgive and forget fashion. Also relieves the regular clinical depression symptoms in a manner that SSRI's and MAOI's never did.

This dosage doesn't seem like a whole lot, and doesn't seem to correlate with Bipolar-2?

Over a year of using this, I find I'm just mildly hyperactive 24/7 year round now instead of seasonally?

If this isn't Bipolar, what am I medicating here?",8.456748768472906,9.379969896551726,8.572857142857146,63.115000000000016,61.24137931034482,11.973399014778328,39.416256157635466,11.629938488055165,5.160915270935962,1064,53,162,31,14,348,148,232,0.268,0.66,0.07200000000000001,-0.996,1,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,3,2,11,18,6,0,11,0,14,8,0,5,1,34,24,13,2,2,9,0,1,3,0,0,7,1,0,1,11,11,1,1,5,1,0,0,10,11,0,0,3,3,12,6,25,19,7,17,0,4,2,0,7,9,0,6,11,104,23,3,0.1477276677800756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813776255119016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334643200755765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817128713745211,0.0,0.0,0.30868794119773857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471687391397028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526421709115976,0.16475539962018693,0.19514546263184587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502041203863352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702760279304026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15418930430937106,0.14659691551864235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15642226998775838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165168293938527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240540347714025,0.0,0.0,0.12559278035522814,0.0,0.13978349115908278,0.09860936536734052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882008354953474,0.14887474320403746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393668451383368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474174887071714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112353548210408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899010138378644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747897077313504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689714409676029,0.15411217570181066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615900913806864,0.0,0.0,0.15354561073724562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758927359948705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16493266541729418,0.0,0.14240420006587462,0.0,0.10754750157192666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902635492170534
mentalhealth,raptorAcrylic,2020/02/25,How to know if a person has some kind of mental illness when their symptoms are not extreme but mild and only a few? I've been noticing that a friend of mine is always worried about his job and his future. He always says that he feels very lonely all the time. The symptoms are not extreme but he's always overthinking and is insecure about how his future will turn out to be. Is this some kind of mental illness?,4.300772357723574,5.625382573170731,4.705853658536586,85.66577235772358,70.82926829268294,6.442276422764228,25.861788617886177,6.42735559955562,0.9912861788617882,329,10,62,2,6,104,53,82,0.175,0.778,0.047,-0.8922,1,2,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,1,5,0,9,4,0,2,1,16,12,9,0,1,5,0,1,0,1,1,4,1,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,5,3,8,9,4,5,0,1,0,0,10,1,0,3,4,45,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4751812327927378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625111272071284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707071191922574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889017043588393,0.0,0.0,0.3964587272642196,0.10461620055800774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3836737304837892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21672471900991955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477642092687906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16621393370120474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513809327219124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3957112939582429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109997284211334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20705567664233607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15706591954851876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19331856909612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sleepyokami,2020/02/25,"Does anyone else find having a depressive episode comforting? I very much so have the mentality that I'd rather feel an emotion than nothing at all. That being said, I know for a fact that I can't feel happy all the time and I often find myself triggering myself into a depressive episode to evoke some emotion. I don't like sitting in a neutral emotion state. 
I didn't think about it this way before but I find it extremely comforting that I'm able to do this because it feeds into my ""want"" of feeling something. I am also aware that this is a very unhealthy cycle to be in. 
I do have diagnosed clinical depression and have had it for about the past ~10 years. I also have bipolar disorder type 2 and I am able to differentiate the two when it comes down to my lows. 

Does anyone else feel the same way?",4.123867924528302,5.596538320754718,5.236619496855346,81.11832547169814,71.45283018867924,8.318867924528304,28.97327044025157,8.841846274778883,2.3310289308176086,639,25,122,12,12,211,92,159,0.149,0.805,0.046,-0.9451,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,11,0,16,4,0,1,3,25,26,8,0,2,2,0,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,13,6,1,0,9,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,3,5,15,4,17,21,5,16,0,4,0,0,1,7,0,2,5,88,28,1,0.2449013957524167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19584755770277035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712407501511652,0.2509304210563423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464480887904981,0.0,0.10419652497259878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054804336945775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163998199560389,0.12428488077741055,0.0,0.0,0.14033910839708538,0.0,0.2143148617843224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20458369109041666,0.4132216610921534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476590083120527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357531584322575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035104485069865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729570119036002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059823225758655126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12340150274770932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001535229688919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749474712580632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689304670811165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647865460793727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426852962493408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784614628566002,0.0,0.0,0.07140198665404446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961653904275635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020692996447611,0.07222459419557277,0.1943913287266048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788542347284479
mentalhealth,darkme15irl,2020/02/25,"“Not only me” 
Words can’t describe what a monster, a sinner I have been. What I was, who used to be, is no longer that man than stands before you. Before this man was a child with insecurities from trauma from his past. He wanted to kill. But he realized there was more than revenge in this world. There was hope. There was sacrifice. There were heroes. I never knew, after all this time that that’s who I was destined to be. I mean, after all, everyone likes to think themselves ever the hero. But who doesn’t question that doubt the slightest? And I was convinced that what I had done, no matter what I endured... it was unredeemable. But it becomes irrefutably true. I realized it’s not the man/woman that makes the hero. We all are. It’s inside every one of us, not just the special peoples who play them on tv/ movies. The only difference is what we do with our story; which route we choose. We can all succumb to our true light, if we fight to survive and live the life we were truly meant to have. 😁 ily all",2.3670078947368443,4.525618085000005,3.1472631578947383,91.24678947368423,78.15,5.4105263157894745,21.52631578947368,6.339386263674448,0.2761999999999998,787,22,160,6,19,248,116,200,0.11599999999999999,0.7240000000000001,0.16,0.8612,0,0,0,0,1,0,33.0,9,1,1,4,6,15,2,2,10,0,24,1,0,2,9,42,32,6,1,3,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,23,10,0,0,8,2,0,0,8,5,0,1,15,1,22,10,18,15,6,10,1,0,0,0,23,3,0,4,7,122,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284972453563373,0.3521016890779311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161593218770492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117235389970997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18714671209543704,0.17431641427181366,0.19769528483658172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205491594918344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22889663268308705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613476060351155,0.10107754956920187,0.0,0.18269045466120756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138102793817115,0.0,0.0,0.22536730888737924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15956876297706185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14019616266341425,0.3147031490431291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197502935909884,0.14343366994559487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317676939006362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256878579491674,0.0,0.0,0.12064106797717285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24886700274087425,0.17868926627349874,0.0,0.0,0.1220309488052356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,miriantonette,2020/02/25,"To everyone in this community!! There are so many people I want to help and talk to. But this is for everyone hurting or suffering and this with a condition. 
Your mind is a library. Your life is a book. If your feeling low imaging the possibility of turning that page to something exhilarating. Every night the last sentence you think about should be something positive about your day, it could be anything from not self harming to still breathing and baring the strain. Every morning the first sentence should be your fondest memory. The biggest smile you had. The best day. Anything is possible. You write your own book. Only you can turn the pages to find out what happens don’t you want to read on? Aren’t you afraid you’ll miss the exciting part. X",3.3124550359712224,6.258719899280576,3.7578372302158254,83.59416591726621,80.22302158273381,6.640467625899283,28.111960431654676,7.865858978985527,2.134528417266187,602,27,106,11,16,188,92,139,0.069,0.7390000000000001,0.192,0.9512,1,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,13,0,2,5,9,0,2,11,0,16,2,1,0,0,19,24,7,0,6,4,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,7,0,1,1,1,14,2,16,16,5,11,0,4,0,0,17,5,0,2,6,76,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586825019001913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16494497858332974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549107754926495,0.0,0.0,0.20272914592817895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648526508433852,0.300374009337761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794721679437186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14365467840330662,0.13369257998810485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898892306545918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535077835158664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682585914976672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12811822460672967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101702294613414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935030993640867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870147588784264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749765469586829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953831714732426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17020470588927775,0.0,0.1089650331094168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3543813467557467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721706961358875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639673194904994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420012732578023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12551978744187575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633093833259532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071109620842507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419215226231653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18541122711257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigsquiddy,2020/02/25,"my multiple mental disorders. Im 15. I have ocd, insomnia, add, anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, synesthesia (which actually is decent.) and i think i named them all. i have attempted suicide 17 times. i think im getting better. im a bad kid. when i was three, i lived in riverdale, georgia. I was forced multiple times to stab people. i used to get into fights at least 3 times a week. i used to smoke and do drugs. i hated my life. my parents are divorced and fight so much. my mom puts her issues on me. i have severe anger issues. i make a lot of stupid decisions. im a crip too.  im so lazy. one thing that i do have, is that i always make people happy. i am also really self confident. recently, i got in a fight at school. i was asked if i would pass a drug test, and this is when my parents found out. i got all trust lost and i felt like i had nobody. 

anyways, in the past two weeks, i have been getting so much better. i still am failing my four classes, but all 60s +. i found an escape in music. making music activates my synesthesia, and its so amazing.  i make so much music everyday. i will link it after this story but it tells a lot about my story. i just made the guys volleyball team today too. i made so many friends too. ive been my best me and have been making people so happy. i love that everyone in my county knows me, because it gives me an oppurtunity to make more people happy.

​

i have quit drugs. i quit fighting. i havent been mean to anyone. but i still need help. i dont have severe depression anymore, i wont kms. but what do yall do, (if you have any of these) to calm down? thats all i really need. my anxiety has gone down too. 

​

heres my music, im so happy making music: [joe mama](https://soundcloud.com/bankbryce)",0.6224484339190184,3.0178975238095265,2.9110128596893325,88.6433565699007,87.76750700280114,5.934530175706648,19.878342245989305,7.348242739294969,0.7436168067226894,1364,42,280,24,44,464,179,357,0.132,0.7070000000000001,0.161,0.97,2,0,4,0,6,1,83.0,0,2,1,9,21,25,7,0,11,0,34,7,0,11,4,47,65,24,1,5,7,3,1,1,1,3,6,0,0,3,14,10,0,0,9,1,0,3,3,12,0,4,17,1,58,13,22,45,12,29,0,4,0,1,23,12,0,4,15,187,72,5,0.0,0.0,0.06553352610082458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370377459921995,0.05587828282418894,0.14552468082872155,0.1632011849208144,0.045667656380692936,0.0,0.10274667784265168,0.0,0.06659964715456396,0.04695628965808353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627807958680334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05607156288643585,0.04093702304040157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047495766435964,0.11878615956030268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568088849962055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15393073946320562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787050797809242,0.0,0.2336352013946831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06416941507818691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447926570895691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726383272339416,0.05188373362818704,0.0,0.10525704025000958,0.06442112968769463,0.0,0.0,0.1074198671627748,0.0,0.0,0.06649394044296802,0.0,0.2859506940416937,0.0,0.06630159190201135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04501253513749448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4352331003279645,0.14018460254235746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03690659419616985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04743351425032575,0.03280850749047271,0.0,0.059299035005656586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330754083606014,0.11418544285640972,0.06060994774154847,0.12708724018108314,0.31378506852417964,0.06808456033657018,0.0,0.07315140773844189,0.0,0.0,0.06767637612132713,0.0,0.0,0.07865104434222854,0.0,0.0,0.1480998051829103,0.09958906184202328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045505919687230466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14913520875260594,0.0,0.06410698102404487,0.1862270961198648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675092546513855,0.0,0.14285507220359697,0.0,0.0,0.0860423376644278,0.0,0.06630739339913602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796437608722404,0.0,0.0,0.07005723968489057,0.15173191580602335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726003036869218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734565955675306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058696370258616265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044614752608426775,0.08606033724190415,0.0,0.0,0.11747574211851627,0.0,0.06365502300918345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06560061025463695,0.0,0.0,0.1160005986687959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773527093557013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04770493669380682,0.0,0.1632011849208144,0.0
mentalhealth,BingoBongo9150,2020/02/25,"Need advice on how to deal with my anxiety Ok so I've always had pretty bad anxiety (not diaagnosed because I'm too pussy to talk to a professional but I have nearly all the symptoms and shit and I'm not gonna self diagnose but this just seems what ny issue is) but it's been getting increasingly worse lately. I get what I'm pretty sure are really bad panic attacks at least twice a week and have been trying to muster up the courage to literally just simply apologize to one of my only friends for not talking to him in awhile because of said anxiety and just being fucking miserable in general lately for an ENTIRE MONTH. It's also EXTREMELY difficult for me to just approach people and talk to them and shit like that. And yeah I basically just get terrible anxiety about virtually everything that's incredibly hard to deal with. So like I said in the title, any advice on handling it? Also any advice on apologizing to my friend? I'm going to try and force myself to do it tomorrow but I've been saying that for a month now.",4.609669966996702,6.103688217821787,6.310514851485149,73.80494719471946,70.2871287128713,9.743102310231023,29.30825082508252,10.047579312681364,3.142864290429044,828,32,148,22,15,285,116,202,0.22,0.64,0.14,-0.9674,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,13,17,4,2,7,2,10,5,2,1,2,28,24,17,0,1,12,0,1,2,2,1,2,3,0,1,10,10,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,10,0,2,6,4,11,7,31,16,3,19,0,1,0,1,15,9,3,1,9,100,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3259092263364798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17780909904577002,0.0925043649104888,0.0,0.0,0.15120212493780222,0.0,0.3401864087485061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647468482408067,0.0,0.0,0.18564866535601413,0.1355393589882872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22922778087103446,0.0,0.11283767301086806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991460874187423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17178308229553493,0.1027771171407173,0.1742490135446681,0.0,0.0631818521032609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958865789636773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603513004516072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250814679454405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862646436777806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774735408028035,0.0,0.0,0.08243294578962819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533331354471633,0.08455164018038565,0.0,0.13043688937771955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707296280870764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22620465046896215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712199033218703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21150087217664387,0.08840877590238844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120720198752868,0.11597708692700436,0.0,0.22823379697845514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477869655957704,0.11555071857650955,0.0,0.2680685565043657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509575604548485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917581493789409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329420060527982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mollywashere318,2020/02/25,"Stuck in a sense of hopeless and fear towards the future      I have no idea how i’m supposed to put what i’m feeling into words. Here’s the best way i can describe it; i stay up way too late because i’m afraid to go to sleep and miss out on something in life. i’m constantly trying to keep busy so that i don’t think about the future and how terrifying it is. I’m a teenager so i have a very long road ahead of me. 
     I don’t really have anyone to talk to about these things and maybe that’s part of the problems. I’ve been searching through google trying to find an app that might put my life together but nothing seems to be helping. I just feel very empty and terrified and i don’t know what to do. 
     
Just to be clear; i’m not suicidal or thinking of self harm, i just don’t know where else to go with all of my thoughts and feelings.",3.8623412899949234,3.798094167597768,4.797704418486543,89.64890807516504,71.01117318435755,7.849873031995938,28.004570848146265,7.348242739294969,1.2392636871508378,652,21,152,6,11,213,104,179,0.14400000000000002,0.773,0.083,-0.8422,0,0,1,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,2,12,7,0,2,8,0,14,3,1,2,2,35,34,13,1,1,6,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,9,10,0,1,11,0,0,4,6,6,0,0,3,3,12,1,28,28,3,22,0,2,0,0,3,9,0,3,6,95,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640523761353922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092765286514817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15969968391208625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644485656284906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712380810708895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17124069391838348,0.23083479490116685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908642100256746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17297064577093904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200059527208316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17178856878214255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352613261352686,0.0,0.0,0.16726427720525305,0.0,0.17166154374184775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149733035298388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346712752392895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15288159088208686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143505216786833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14601730575494162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479215047540946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456122088135532,0.0,0.30595851310228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748806230936646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853562772932068,0.15875311464129208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228624338111402,0.0,0.0,0.11715278384806607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621997344064692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664562205097308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12231358052431028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010992007021083,0.19501691253728995,0.0,0.12081101843346707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066354961643573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511228410775093,0.0,0.2415809964030953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Designer-Chemical,2020/02/25,"Is there something wrong with me? I (18 F) have recently realized some things about myself that I’ve never really thought about before, and I am wondering if these are normal traits to have or is there some sort of mental disorder which might explain any of this.

First, I find it hard to empathize with people. I can put myself into others’ shoes and would hate to be there myself, but when someone tells me about their issues, it’s difficult for me to care or feel bad for them. For example, my best friend recently had some issues with her family that led to her almost being kicked out. She has called me crying and tells me about what’s happening in her life, yet even though she’s my closest friend, I don’t care about her issues. She has told me this is the most difficult thing she’s gone through but it doesn’t affect me or make me sad, I just live my life without thinking about her problems. 

In addition to this, I always feel the need to bring others down. When they’re proud of something or think they’re successful, I get this urge to let them know that they’re not as good as they think they are, and that what they’ve done really isn’t that impressive. This really has an impact on my relationships. My last relationship, which lasted about two years, ended because I lost interest in my ex and I would be really hostile and indifferent to him, an issue which got way worse over time. I would feel like I had to call him out on everything he did that irritated me. Also, I found it hard to keep up with the emotional requirements of a relationship, such as having to be there for the other person and listening to their problems. That stuff seems useless to me and a waste of my time.

Also, not sure if this is relevant, but I am asexual and not sure if I would ever want or be able to handle a romantic relationship. Thinking about sex makes me feel uncomfortable and I don’t understand why people are so dependent on it. I also have recently diagnosed moderate/severe OCD, as well as social and general anxiety.

I would appreciate anybody’s opinion on this. Is there something psychologically wrong with me or am I just an asshole? And I’m aware these are not good traits to have in any way and I don’t think it’s “unique” of me to be like this. Please be honest and tell me I’m just a terrible person if that’s the case.",6.138293708555717,6.2824861659388676,6.664420184376517,77.49488516901181,66.16157205240174,10.453307455927542,29.40837781012453,10.25414643259724,2.7652467087174504,1856,57,362,42,27,607,209,458,0.16399999999999998,0.705,0.131,-0.9064,1,0,3,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,6,6,28,30,2,0,12,0,44,5,1,5,4,92,78,39,0,14,21,1,6,2,2,6,3,1,0,2,35,23,0,2,18,0,0,4,11,13,1,2,10,7,61,17,61,54,5,36,0,3,0,1,36,15,0,21,17,272,96,2,0.07211681332799706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221457129588686,0.0,0.0,0.17301536868993672,0.060006965846357424,0.0,0.0,0.09808381210788232,0.0,0.05516916480351936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021452680757242,0.043961740040686,0.0,0.06136609648784117,0.0,0.075682146333925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14727865910198287,0.0,0.14705579504309887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921693309613408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319704748092225,0.0,0.0,0.08265211598158301,0.0,0.0,0.07380053845732927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811217083362924,0.0638740912043591,0.0,0.0,0.04763247505327689,0.06523378642065504,0.0,0.0,0.06481394170023637,0.0,0.06798531337361242,0.0,0.14585771074570064,0.05152026585114175,0.0,0.0,0.06591346087555756,0.061342524575903126,0.0,0.07907236348368113,0.11143454216744056,0.0,0.037678058452175735,0.0,0.0,0.1209763229209812,0.05767840361467338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637726598565143,0.0,0.12920499911230265,0.07120042277141811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010848663124262,0.0,0.06410073725334038,0.0,0.0,0.039633514587464114,0.11756965633034608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374432769146859,0.10187647600222474,0.07046526446222566,0.0,0.06368046740989015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872402079839258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627706578534212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267678577910311,0.0765045424154955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05347370329388616,0.055620932299069635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065916521214571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999343601601854,0.12593923944568727,0.0,0.07916260476154674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380121015330244,0.0,0.07249731619213437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847995090978358,0.0,0.213619958772634,0.30970587420120843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06565243833572243,0.0,0.08147147182583972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735140093034398,0.061104341904907086,0.16655713862583926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255649746413526,0.0,0.0,0.13593848618841708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890998205776589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582241259778408,0.23104771015643244,0.07085440293769632,0.05725269425621071,0.08410378759921051,0.0,0.0,0.06891070563304101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07044764763863058,0.07507614601046741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04253636498305717,0.11448593931682018,0.0,0.0,0.06484167606297307,0.0,0.06507420697576022,0.0,0.0,0.06951803455370417,0.07820760775691826,0.0,0.0,0.07349319389295693,0.2561485752787589,0.15769682857429093,0.0,0.04644086334062817
mentalhealth,musicmaniac4309,2020/02/25,What to expect at therapy? I finally have my first therapy session in a week!! What should I expect?,1.07245614035088,3.6658558947368434,4.269473684210528,75.73298245614036,95.31578947368422,8.849122807017544,27.385964912280702,8.841846274778883,3.732354385964912,78,4,13,3,3,28,15,19,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,12,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3922815222445599,0.0,0.30460004669719026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8190381113530195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28724656831516593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,monteminx,2020/02/25,"Have been feeling on the verge of relapse and just realized it's national eating disorder awareness week again Which I found out because I was secret binge eating in my car after the gym and googling to see if this was really a relapse. Tears and guilt and donuts. It's hard to talk about. Binge eating brought me to a morbidly obese bmi, I was prediabetic. It's hard to talk about, to feel dismissed because my eating disorder never showed bone. This is the healthiest I've ever been, but I still get nervous having certain foods in my house. The fear of losing control. Ive been unemployed for 3 weeks and I just got a tentative offer but that's not even for another 2-4 weeks and I'm really have a hard time with my mental health. I'm just tired of feeling like my relationship with food takes over my life",4.390471698113206,5.929360075471699,5.236619496855346,81.11832547169814,70.88679245283019,8.570440251572327,28.34433962264151,9.075114841892004,2.350588679245284,648,24,123,13,12,211,97,159,0.158,0.7859999999999999,0.055999999999999994,-0.9207,3,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,9,6,0,3,8,0,11,11,1,1,3,26,22,9,0,1,7,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,7,9,7,1,6,2,0,2,2,4,0,0,9,7,13,2,20,13,0,18,0,1,1,0,5,7,0,1,10,76,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280121195089085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883836177239804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692373726287072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798298140231915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4996755923277562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063306351765281,0.11042886262094022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373745789461335,0.18518280923796568,0.08721438187234573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29524061380712585,0.13385504112770144,0.0,0.0,0.06378205787119003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097638982166198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32808062845467817,0.0,0.0,0.1297659345933439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408645841371168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622911523339888,0.05964239879216567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657692812274422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302849846518983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941560597463308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641587528729245,0.0,0.0,0.1310688422044229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972824065372754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974936989676693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178939370642653,0.19624747178295876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711861607020963,0.14031365365678505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29377700258022504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hppyppy,2020/02/25,"My husband has long-term depression and has slipped into a state of what I believe to be delusion or psychosis. How do I handle this situation? My husband has suffered from mild depression and ADHD as long as I've been with him (\~5.5 years). He has gone through periods of better mental health than others, but has a history of an episode of drug induced psychosis (LSD), as well as dependency on marijuana and use of other hallucinogens. Over the past \~3 months, he has slipped into a more severe form of depression, the habit of smoking weed almost every day, and smoking DMT on occasion. Over the last week he almost got to a point of sleep deprivation and his appetite has been very poor--of note that he started taking XR Adderall less than two weeks ago. Today he came home from work and seemed completely unlike himself and not very ""present"". He starts rambling to me about these ideas (delusions) in his head about this hockey game from the other night and after listening to him for about 30-45 minutes I grow suspicious that something is just not right with him. He has been speaking to me in a monopitch voice with a wide-eyed stare, almost like looking through me and claiming that this episode he is experiencing is a Kundalini awakening and that it's completely normal.  For the last half an hour he has been attempting to manipulate me into letting him continue to ramble at me and telling me that I'm not in touch with reality and it is making me really uncomfortable and scared. How do I handle this situation? What are the next steps I should take?",10.106777188328913,8.318431741379314,9.304482758620688,68.0864854111406,59.17241379310346,12.371352785145886,41.273209549071616,11.051253699011982,4.52463925729443,1255,55,218,25,13,398,165,290,0.105,0.87,0.025,-0.9773,0,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,3,7,9,0,1,15,0,23,4,2,7,0,41,36,21,0,2,6,2,1,1,0,1,2,3,1,0,17,21,0,0,3,2,0,4,3,6,1,2,7,7,21,3,47,26,3,38,0,5,2,0,22,13,0,6,21,150,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13927526924903094,0.0,0.1027280248594796,0.0,0.34813631013642315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305664790265596,0.0,0.10249382290718603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254539279473554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24301344811938044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473839482640521,0.0,0.299443383223623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13439368719537814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764092823912764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268649548439732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893487497059765,0.1231838907357888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624545822315915,0.0,0.11412667513969114,0.0,0.0,0.13082383466067649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18892893592139126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850368365320657,0.0,0.05661719124559311,0.0,0.0,0.20511507570437,0.09731702192992717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735636966289043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11678819375683408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250097072703267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232485688157941,0.10875336057040336,0.11354597192250873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062853760933647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955194372283374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424104080594705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989680127713434,0.0,0.0,0.11602444946177598,0.0,0.0,0.1055003961273915,0.0,0.13092084267692608,0.0,0.0,0.2605267088970785,0.11597203740868095,0.0,0.0,0.08921650918236504,0.0,0.0,0.16405273304350196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17426722476079964,0.0,0.10129152084468497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984859986392642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320607308006755,0.0,0.0,0.10009032080081197,0.0,0.1912400416019909,0.0,0.0,0.18591727893218707,0.0,0.10419753909559623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436809482473019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462829413707278
mentalhealth,getridoftheaccount69,2020/02/25,"Not a therapy person, settling for therapy Hi everyone. My apologies if this is all over the place, it’s my first post on reddit ever, hah, i’m just a tad late. Anyway i’ve been struggling extra hard with my mental health here lately, so I started writing, however people who told me to write my feelings because it would help are now making fun of it, and telling me it’s not a good idea because i’m just hiding my feelings in my journal.. I hate therapy, I hate the idea of myself going to therapy. Therapy and medication to me are like my LAST resort. I feel like therapy and medication to me are giving up, a sign of weakness because I wasn’t even strong enough to help myself. I guess my question is, do I take the plunge and schedule an appointment with a therapist, do I continue writing my feelings? Do I try seek medication? I’m starting to feel as if i’m losing all hope, and I don’t want to continue being as sad as I have been here these past couple months.. It, it isn’t healthy for me.. Thank you for reading this far, if you haven’t I don’t blame you. Thanks for your time! 
-Sincerely, Anon.",3.472655007949129,4.870219450450449,5.129968203497615,81.54245627980923,72.96396396396396,8.106412294647589,29.275039745627986,8.671277953709913,2.3022190779014315,866,36,170,16,17,294,119,222,0.11800000000000001,0.742,0.14,0.6423,1,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,4,0,3,9,15,2,1,9,1,18,5,0,1,3,34,41,12,0,6,7,0,6,2,0,1,5,0,0,1,10,7,0,0,8,1,0,1,7,6,0,1,4,6,32,9,23,35,4,22,0,2,0,0,17,6,0,6,16,116,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926917020239365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241468121937186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956381038729112,0.0,0.06113429176895231,0.08372483957159994,0.0,0.08844401176849813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340028477290325,0.0661241088361418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873056756074233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879094729624883,0.0526033655817694,0.07763402819519727,0.0,0.0,0.10196408231742816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291460925454608,0.18276553611425989,0.0,0.09838580057625468,0.0,0.0,0.12408058208352868,0.0,0.0,0.09193188929270016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20897550208335386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754478710715281,0.20882098003476268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904392230802991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354975252720154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617837958640237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27973011371402723,0.0932776182988558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387964452738092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835795958596591,0.06416869882937977,0.0808188762060027,0.09670436815813574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864585688803224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368717020160552,0.0,0.09258396480953454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102735577516728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676267679828614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959278652379869,0.0,0.08090057320291627,0.17043163027769864,0.6350951294318681,0.10746803667535673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053971848872153116,0.0,0.0,0.08844401176849813,0.0,0.06284142895146795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054593647396157415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575119902872148,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MushroomCloud27,2020/02/25,"How to deal with social situations I'll let this be clear, I don't know if I have Asperger's, although I have a good bit if the symptoms, but right now I have no way to know, my parents won't take me to get checked out because they don't care at all. I just need help with my issues and I don't have anyone to really go to.

When I talk to someone I have no clue what to say or do. I get confused, I fiddle with buttons or chains, and I can't think straight. I don't know how to stand, where to put my arms, what I'm supposed to do with my hands, where to look or how to hold my head. It all runs through my head when I'm talking to people. I've got no clue what to say and I stutter and slow down alot, my head starts to hurt and my chest pounds. I've never known what to say, I don't understand, I hear people having conversations around me and I've got no clue how they can talk to eachother the way they do, my conversations sound nothing like that and it scares me. I don't understand how people can choose the words they say so quickly, it doesn't make any sense. There's more to say but I'm not sure I want to post it all here, there's so much to say about when no one probably cares anyway.",2.9945846430175145,3.15063748854962,4.112191288729232,93.03022676246073,72.96946564885495,7.386079928154468,24.190390660080823,7.048011613610866,0.5481829366861248,930,23,231,8,17,304,125,262,0.152,0.804,0.044000000000000004,-0.977,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,4,0,21,9,0,2,5,0,22,7,6,6,6,48,45,25,0,4,9,1,1,1,0,1,1,8,0,0,10,13,0,1,8,0,1,3,16,4,0,1,2,10,33,5,30,40,7,23,0,1,1,0,20,8,0,7,9,147,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253358092024507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745803070610165,0.0,0.0,0.09495148383245114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06501995304033703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644689882036008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174973256100105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996347967872057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145262170897967,0.0,0.06061827483056857,0.08946273314062507,0.17061413360785382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283968804109577,0.0,0.12021543369754592,0.0,0.07149305698115814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141835044575251,0.0,0.0,0.11132705308452474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17585536343071131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090687656824535,0.0,0.05210949546206076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956892422729514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119748092808548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840858684140599,0.07908826342732589,0.08226404147784594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234473174128987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227669579688249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11843514195188755,0.0,0.0,0.22183727855470547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215237857883924,0.0,0.11499930097049214,0.0,0.0,0.10722442037099784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833018547661156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910884679889327,0.0,0.5089297603678702,0.10678692089281472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989216575693905,0.0,0.10872812195997802,0.09037407157998747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549566624549246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052734468841854,0.11086229640898784,0.0801962880714755,0.25719178673422843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834447977057015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220770826419685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06291180583719808,0.16932610927750635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the-sink-dink-4000,2020/02/25,"Can anyone maybe... steer me in a direction? I’m at work so I have to type this fairly quickly. Apologies for the... brevity. 

In my time alone I find that I can almost find bliss in these.... picturesque... well constructed homicidal thoughts. I use it as a means to feel as if I’m pushing self away from those I associate my most demonic times with. These people that have done horrible things to me but also taught me to be terrible, to myself mostly. I’ve been taught to only bend backwards and serve others. Ignore sense of self and be a character on a show. Constantly in character, always shifting when necessary. I suppose I have fantasies about brutally murdering these people and the only way I let that out is through writing short stories. 
I need to make it clear that I am sane enough to never cause any harm. I meditate, do yoga, eat well, exercise, and be as kind as possible. I am not harmful to society. I am integrated into society. I was just hoping someone might be able to... I guess say “well that seems normal given the circumstances” or a “hey man you are totally screwed and need help”
  I thank you kindly for any feed back, and all responses are welcomed with much gratitude. Be well all.",3.133240758475388,5.705062105726874,4.269703122007279,82.02972610610995,77.72246696035242,8.00068952307987,27.49071059184064,8.841846274778883,2.5723278682244777,946,40,170,23,23,308,146,227,0.107,0.713,0.18,0.9477,0,1,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,2,0,1,12,16,3,0,8,0,22,4,0,3,5,40,38,16,1,5,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,14,10,2,1,6,4,0,1,2,7,4,0,7,2,24,9,31,24,7,21,1,0,0,1,11,12,1,9,7,127,38,4,0.12553535725727524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570552674837546,0.13001677063567182,0.0,0.10039057984396764,0.10445547366584967,0.0,0.0,0.17073669545154935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777724063672758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794460051447347,0.09652894089568663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289593922088712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13565912394241006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12846625541929532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284540104104889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971158176300607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347444854472464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294740845367957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382913490002086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414370379778996,0.0,0.0,0.12468493510142944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614515133644197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12836840807623634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379582576725589,0.0,0.1261171394637734,0.1367448060042199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331731758619614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228293186743072,0.1861657535070671,0.09682060652610304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299799643204655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909505920680128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740608206932542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152225327354856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983075471128214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142826744687368,0.26192151172689243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636570082645734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557609075533838,0.0,0.0,0.08340011325796434,0.0,0.0,0.09966105122679823,0.14640135269063642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842224265905652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996441234009176,0.0,0.0,0.4514854494584702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139123520218533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alchiap,2020/02/25,"I feel like a fraud I am currently taking a leave from work. I was in the hospital for two weeks due to new symptoms. It was bound to happen. I was having panic attacks even at work and some wonderful paranoia.

​

Anyway... I am not going back to work until March 29. I can't do iop and work at the same time. Plus I am trying to figure out  why my legs are always on fire and other neurological issues going on. I just can't do it all. But not all my co workers know why I am out and I do post on facebook. I don't want them to think I am taking a vacation. I am not even getting paid  being home because I work part time. I just feel... weird about it. I feel like I am faking a sickness but I am not. Why couldn't I have broken my leg or something? WAY easier to explain. 

​

Is this a silly, anxiety feeling or should I be worried? HR knows, my managers know why I am out so that's not an issue. Its everyone else I am worried about.",0.5234047619047644,2.553987750000005,3.0512857142857146,90.14933333333336,84.0,5.40952380952381,21.02380952380953,6.655083550727371,0.41598095238095256,730,23,157,8,21,253,112,200,0.12300000000000001,0.7929999999999999,0.084,-0.5191,1,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,1,6,9,7,1,1,8,0,27,5,2,0,2,38,45,11,0,3,11,0,5,2,0,1,3,0,1,0,7,8,0,1,11,0,1,2,9,4,0,1,4,5,27,3,21,37,5,22,0,0,0,0,2,9,0,4,11,116,34,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933419068228614,0.2326544218804121,0.2609143487669924,0.0,0.0,0.08213200948968225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221403295021742,0.0,0.08255512621502456,0.0,0.06544717620909561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968758230727833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14182382158677256,0.0,0.0,0.10258945824448253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21714279934767128,0.15339956582148556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609246877976101,0.0,0.12203315224993712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494029360733376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769332931043518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22411708773588687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17701084697222427,0.0,0.0,0.11368137291920577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490377713920536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369135997099804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125966747179432,0.0,0.1162631121536745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282358581341844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265288855293731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159073344028367,0.16144645916533076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879354723139443,0.0,0.0,0.12520786032954276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289208192313676,0.0,0.10487755043942038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332517711455682,0.08521934569693201,0.08611971190352767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3875117851721212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643003850670583,0.3908058498858215,0.21806363621593888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609143487669924,0.0
mentalhealth,StevenRiccio,2020/02/25,"My ex-girlfriend texted me saying a mutual friend died, but to not text her back. It is a very long story, but here is a condensed version:

- We started and ran a music and fashion company together about 5 years ago (we produced music and high fashion). The company was our passion and life. 

- She was diagnosed with borderline personality about a year ago.
- She broke up with me in October. 
- I haven’t really had any communication with her for about 3-4 months.
- I have spent the last 6 months in devastation (I have recently been feeling better, though). 

Last night, I received a text message from her saying: “Don’t text me back. _________ died, and I just wanted to let you know.” 

The person she mentioned who passed away was one of our biggest fans. He was young (possibly in his late teens - early 20’s). 

When she broke up with me, she publicly exposed multiple lies about me on social media, particularly about me being an abusive person. Many of our mutual friends took her side, which broke many of my healthy and positive relationships.

One of them was with this person who passed away. He would message me at random times to tell me that I messed up, our company is nothing without her, etc.

I have a lot of mixed emotions at the moment, and they are hard to process.

- It was nice to see that she thought of me and reached out. (She initially had me believe that I would never hear from her or see her again.)
- I am angry that she reached out to tell me something so devastating, but to firstly demand that I don’t respond to her (there would be no one else to talk to about this, for either of us).
- I am sad that he passed away. I don’t know how he died, but I believe it was related to suicide or an overdose.
- I am relieved that I don’t have to read the ridicule from him anymore (This is the hardest emotion to cope with).

I am here to share this story, in hopes that someone might have something to say.",4.307154471544717,5.6333498509485125,4.9616802168021685,83.83162601626017,70.81571815718158,7.851490514905149,29.655826558265577,8.285830014693849,2.0410151761517605,1481,59,293,22,27,476,185,369,0.175,0.727,0.098,-0.9896,0,0,2,0,0,1,64.0,7,1,2,3,17,14,1,0,15,0,36,3,0,2,1,43,49,18,4,5,10,0,2,0,2,4,2,4,0,4,18,18,0,0,4,1,1,6,9,6,0,4,14,8,57,8,55,28,4,47,0,4,2,1,56,18,0,6,23,216,75,2,0.0,0.10931575716596988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635699520177474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274153843222663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149942547275958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600504478483029,0.14188805140011615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20789607060696647,0.0,0.08159852054965741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364430824932694,0.2872611518220838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770733258599953,0.2075653738119888,0.0,0.0,0.10289687035966837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046650598950632234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847827853541464,0.0,0.0,0.14256327236518948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264891263120956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039863351262747,0.0,0.0,0.09748020200673684,0.0,0.09163729714806343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140991159513699,0.15041220263748872,0.10407591068464442,0.0,0.0,0.0943444686861057,0.06516760204429008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164924599926353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843812140976282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18707901379428532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787573678156372,0.0,0.0,0.14728580019047827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115838559863448,0.0,0.0,0.08658193319010425,0.0,0.08852818016723345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18755799849785496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32223958110910245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401189819557424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922872831144007,0.0,0.059105601898739285,0.0,0.09109790606753128,0.09905519876974626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22011208956121067,0.0,0.0,0.14704224061611346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940498119087312,0.07817356062355876,0.14205607618867538,0.0,0.0,0.06530374186842387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091999851013192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415695446215352,0.16128266095871396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906472566567524,0.07324597280280237,0.053798898192779665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250682742632512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109802057333567,0.0,0.0,0.07612607287908713,0.05441870418772653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893757987070673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966215056470565,0.0,0.0,0.1188278126428019
mentalhealth,windows-entrance45,2020/02/25,"I always feel like I’m gonna get attacked when I go outside I can’t do anything because of my fear. 
I always am worried I’ll get into a confrontation with someone. 
People seem like they’re willing to fight complete strangers and I am nervous that I’ll run into a rude person and they’ll escalate a problem. 

I sometimes wanna carry a knife or gun in case someone does attack me. 

I don’t understand how some people can be so fucking loud and obnoxious and not care about being disrespectful to others without worrying about being attacked. I’ve met people who are flamboyant and often disrespectful and loud. They’d say anything they want to and I don’t get how these people don’t ever get scared of starting a problem but me, who never is rude to anyone always is scared. 

I also have a lot of anger and hatred pent up in me. 
Everything people say to me I take personally. It always gets under my skin. I don’t know why. Maybe it’s low self esteem? 

How can fix all of these problems?",3.2227671068427384,5.212354806122452,4.800348139255704,81.18162665066029,74.91836734693878,6.652581032412965,26.835534213685474,7.510576382923642,1.6727686674669862,786,30,141,10,17,264,114,196,0.267,0.7020000000000001,0.031,-0.9918,0,0,0,1,1,0,14.0,0,0,3,0,10,20,9,4,6,0,20,2,1,3,3,33,38,16,0,5,4,0,2,2,0,3,0,4,0,3,8,11,0,0,4,0,0,2,8,17,0,0,1,6,20,3,20,30,3,13,0,1,0,1,12,7,1,5,6,95,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847388382723083,0.3526799228925727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409202546559546,0.0,0.17439758705818706,0.0,0.0,0.3616457623495471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459426363711747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803667900302266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110053750677584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272922585869403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958499002588036,0.0,0.0,0.09523301019639306,0.0,0.0,0.11923820799712885,0.05357824447289093,0.07570022551343718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979613929120633,0.2768073373281091,0.0,0.06022140346985234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0582346760560174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353666314662972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008623553438036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645440937782384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172545402759958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3673081617118783,0.1850461885149223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30417779403020506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16853258923755762,0.2121755614577948,0.0,0.0,0.09646503769760878,0.1105428649618329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17956477458468426,0.0,0.10480044476823162,0.0,0.07500139174040678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967123832269465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031156555156192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06249991859597402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956154255377152,0.0,0.0,0.10214487068392523,0.0,0.0,0.2152218143438137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KundalinirRZA,2020/02/25,"Peaceful animated spiritual series with good vibes In this [YouTube Trailer](https://youtu.be/fkjwk3q2Jmk), you have a sneak peak of the air elementals (♊️♎️♒️) segment in ""Spirit Academy"" where the ""Star Spirits"" are first brought to consciousness. 
They are taught essential knowledge about their personalities, qualities, essence and how they express that element with their physical body.

Youforia Synopsis : The events that leads to a ""StarSpirit"" before it’s birth into the planetary sphere called Youforia. Starting from a nebula into an average star then fast forward to after it’s death and what happens afterwards.

Genre : Animated / fantasy / spiritual / sci-fi.

Subscribe to my YouTube channel (KundaliniRZA) if you are interested to watch it when it comes out! (Reddit) r/youforia .",8.442378181818185,11.794430096000006,7.438618181818183,61.97130909090913,64.03999999999999,11.265454545454546,42.56363636363636,11.022393298168332,6.15116,642,39,83,21,11,197,94,125,0.032,0.879,0.08900000000000001,0.7088,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,4,2,4,2,0,0,8,0,4,1,1,2,0,13,9,6,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,8,0,0,2,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,7,2,16,7,1,21,2,0,1,0,9,9,0,1,10,51,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.316791710638402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4135307084795519,0.0,0.0,0.3801501238284853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3206952154860557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3166700247770999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122595250332956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292151719624041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32506961811073903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26350906188874984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QuantumWaffleTheory,2020/02/25,"Help, I don't know how to help my friend  📷

### Evie Tsow <eitsow@email.wm.edu> 

8:30 PM (1 minute ago)to me 📷

I’m  in college and my friend is dealing with many severely difficult life  circumstances and mental health issues and I don’t know what to do.  Among many issues, she grew up in a severely emotionally abusive  mentally ill hoarder household, her piece of shit mom left everybody  about a year ago and is just gone, her dad is dying, her brother is  emotionally distant, she has no other good family, she has several types  of ptsd from her family and traumatic sexual experiences, she’s trans and early into transitioning and struggles with body dysphoria, and in  general is severely traumatized and depressed and anxious and has been  constantly struggling with panic/ptsd attacks and suicidal desires and  general self hatred. She also can’t sleep more than a few hours because  of relentless fear/paranoia/anxiety and violent nightmares where she can  feel physical pain. 

​

She’s tried a lot of the standard avenues for help -  she’s been in counseling for a long time, started medication several  weeks ago, has tried help lines but they only force her to retell all  her traumas and then tell her to get hospitalized, which is not helpful.  She doesn’t think hospitalization would help because it would remove  her from her support network of friends here at school, and it wouldn’t  actually fix any of her issues, just prevent her from physically harming  herself. She’s done a remarkable job of staying alive and not  significantly hurting herself through many years of suicidal tendencies,  she has made a number of attempts/near attempts but somehow has managed  to not carry through with it. She’s still on the verge basically all  the time, but if she hasn’t done it yet, then I think/hope she’s not in  immediate danger of hurting herself. And she doesn’t have any desire to  hurt other people. 

​

She just has it deeply ingrained in her mind that her  already extremely difficult life circumstances will only continue to  get worse as her dad and mom die and her mental illnesses get worse and  she either loses the ability to keep up with school or she graduates and  then has nowhere to go and no purpose to keep living for. And she has it ingrained that she is an undeserving pathetic horrible person who is  broken and incapable to having relationships with anybody without only  hurting them and is convinced that she is going to die by finally listening to her brain and killing herself sometime in the next handful of years or sooner. And I know she has a number of really great personal  qualities and is a really cool person who can be genuinely enjoyable company, but telling her that seems counterproductive sometimes. I’m afraid that her fears might indeed come true and her life might indeed  keep getting even more difficult and that she’ll succumb to it all. 

​

I really hope that things can get better for her, because she’s been dealt the worst card in life of anyone who I’ve met so far, and yet somehow she’s still a really great person despite all these struggles. But I  don’t know how things can get better. She really does seem to be out of  options with things foreseeably getting worse. I really want to help her and to believe that she can eventually live a much better life, but I  have no idea what to do. I’m trying to just listen and validate her and tell her that she’s great and things can get better, but sometimes I have doubts and don’t know what to say or do, and honestly this is really scary and difficult for me to deal with. She’s had a couple panic attacks in front of me, and I try to keep saying supportive things and asking how I can help her in various ways and giving her things to  squeeze or focus on to distract herself with, but I think sometimes my presence might just make it worse? I just want her to not have to suffer so much, and I want her to not die. 

Please, somebody tell me what might help. She says she’s too broken to be helped, and I’m afraid that she might be right. But surely somebody out  there has dealt with similarly awful circumstances and gotten through them? I’m not expecting her to be happy anytime soon, I just want to find a way to  make life suck less and be somewhat more easy/enjoyable for her.",9.811706505500474,8.396827660804025,9.10680293358685,68.08923604509032,59.45226130653266,12.575254651636564,39.9808501969306,11.476622904949028,4.605727801168002,3462,147,592,79,37,1100,329,796,0.196,0.6459999999999999,0.158,-0.9916,2,0,0,0,0,0,84.0,0,0,3,6,26,52,7,9,20,2,68,16,5,6,6,145,117,70,7,12,30,5,3,0,3,10,11,5,0,5,36,60,0,5,12,0,0,7,20,31,0,0,10,9,91,21,92,91,17,58,0,7,0,0,110,24,2,19,24,421,127,7,0.0,0.049931697006421534,0.041124774951347566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206973489336404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046505041213082236,0.033701156886215944,0.0,0.13698339090758668,0.15362240675106836,0.05731637538691325,0.0,0.03223872004671891,0.047608768074369,0.0,0.02946685398505785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03939733225047506,0.09588582852655664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706860716411817,0.0,0.0,0.04747990534709557,0.0,0.14908564729865328,0.0,0.046810559998497536,0.0,0.0470447089202975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03630183277303918,0.0,0.045540820922995134,0.0,0.0,0.046629618525905366,0.0,0.0,0.0868936567056706,0.03629707409913785,0.0,0.1749480851477353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03687898314771259,0.0862523442976311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480875971493706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02783457088473009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04122322505096301,0.07945596033386132,0.09484353659957308,0.02130839718225162,0.0,0.0,0.046164795233457775,0.03851726992868858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767703629187176,0.0,0.17614076742609916,0.04042670398113499,0.04790084470414156,0.035346935383388116,0.0,0.13938599935793405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04486122844036289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04479526074401127,0.0,0.0,0.2824707424824183,0.0,0.0,0.0418567814403696,0.04150164554953645,0.0,0.1804566801045421,0.047573491551146666,0.0,0.13195673819677206,0.04181969881805028,0.14983193821827795,0.04662417618812916,0.0,0.11580144323403793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04578769802146742,0.0,0.17859798317841225,0.0,0.0,0.07442479031840238,0.03729458147418056,0.0,0.047146418865989685,0.0,0.03582784964878246,0.0,0.039876033403070166,0.0562605829148819,0.12817693727612486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04245390191260321,0.12740848401306967,0.22353143590440527,0.04255167776500758,0.098713031045705,0.0,0.0,0.06195883258405421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04481878063318633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615328257096338,0.0448423449246705,0.09888974402906063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029216142764810157,0.14718801337109272,0.0,0.046259555716778936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852411336478396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18898191416599586,0.0,0.0,0.04524502505501121,0.0,0.03598926702938561,0.0,0.10053967011118198,0.0,0.08530045116130776,0.0,0.07672947696155127,0.04396357692276672,0.23804384037184495,0.043258433004757166,0.0,0.0,0.042172703132738285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16671912444820794,0.0,0.02982851454259306,0.04491805100355733,0.0673097401076923,0.0,0.0,0.132168747281013,0.0,0.09219360352315427,0.09564509374893196,0.039718589318970224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733680062524165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798470368056506,0.0810091920553437,0.0,0.0,0.049146991311833164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444733605538855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942640729673384,0.06690114233313836,0.03380398580057506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040623642974418055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17178628762588236,0.059873316829701415,0.0,0.15362240675106836,0.08141471765787547
mentalhealth,heartgush,2020/02/25,"What does ""getting better"" feel like? Hi! I'm a 16 years old girl, so I'm still quite young and at a very confusing stage in my life. Having recently been diagnosed with depression and social anxiety doesn't really make it better I suppose. 

Now my mental health has been steadily going down since 5th grade/11 years old. I never even though i would turn 16, let alone get rid of my suicidal thoughts. So it did ""get better"", because I grew to no longer wanting to kill myself, becoming clean of self harm and actually becoming a person with a social life that I'm even a bit proud of. 

Still it's not. Good? My suicidial thoughts are gone but only because of the immense guilt they bring me, most of the time i wish i wouldn't have a family or friends just so that I could end it all. Life is hard. I don't have the motivation to do anything. I literally can't imagine a happy future for me or any future at all to be honest. 
I also have been getting SO much worse since a few months ago. Anxiety attacks have become way more frequent, my derealization symptoms have been acting up like crazy - going outside is overwhelming and makes me want to cry and hide. It's all just too much, I don't know how to handle it and now even the friendships I worked so hard for begin to crumble bc I can't be a good friend right now, especially to the friends that also suffer from mental illnesses. 

So, what does it feel like to ""get better""? How do you do it? Therapy hasn't worked so far, it seems to have made it worse even though my therapist is a wonderful and competent woman. How does it feel like when therapy ""works""? 
We're thinking of getting me on medication, what is that like? Is it scary? I am kind of scared. I tried denying that I'm mentally ill for so long, I guess I'm just hoping to hear of some experiences because I don't understand anything that is going on. 

Thank you if you read this lengthy text!! <3 
or: 

TL;DR: Recently got diagnosed with depression & anxiety, hoping to hear of some experiences with that and what ""getting better"" and the process of good therapy is like.

note: sorry for any errors, english isn't my first language!",3.927100600274824,5.598832756563247,4.96372748969408,82.08981919432995,72.26968973747017,8.32461126780936,27.73276921964273,8.927757054556999,2.216238822593476,1691,63,327,34,33,554,203,419,0.212,0.647,0.141,-0.9864,0,1,0,0,0,1,62.0,0,3,1,13,29,34,2,4,16,0,39,10,0,7,4,57,81,30,2,9,9,0,5,6,3,2,10,2,1,4,24,13,0,0,12,1,0,7,12,10,0,1,10,7,33,24,38,65,11,42,0,4,0,0,16,9,0,13,30,207,57,5,0.0,0.0,0.0635676755991752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05774307223658533,0.0,0.0,0.06746585346230803,0.0,0.10418557722415868,0.0,0.07057964261194613,0.0,0.08859546979712925,0.0,0.14949678144769776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10721006827925407,0.0,0.0,0.07410665772086569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912702804780705,0.2158275039074957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880571405918205,0.07111649236477349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05200934308917751,0.0,0.07155371771052671,0.0,0.0,0.11221073594994167,0.13223235659320245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17101452153364974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05769509765679371,0.0,0.0,0.17209859259154836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743970515542202,0.061408612167473085,0.0,0.0988108954679178,0.13960903616188314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05540842741069744,0.0,0.0,0.15098203367279725,0.0,0.23823234971330826,0.0,0.11106244450024268,0.1639101386841216,0.052098762839375465,0.0,0.07175954179708859,0.0,0.0,0.06934321269480978,0.11670608381229712,0.0,0.0,0.06924124464448815,0.1468360267089339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939831560779422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206824865332585,0.06783374714624356,0.03579948382028246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661051621355224,0.13803186364890058,0.1909459800321568,0.0,0.0,0.057647242071534675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163746205412796,0.08696350285161918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562214304861827,0.19693873558960653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199448000632347,0.0,0.09577144129946674,0.0,0.05024032530638543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13670787393704212,0.0,0.0,0.04954224212775128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05687812211209495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928487926594831,0.06515807077836455,0.0,0.04173063570570042,0.0,0.1286366574244243,0.0,0.0,0.05562958227206327,0.0,0.0,0.06521694713439381,0.0,0.0,0.0593014126661677,0.06795568849463685,0.0,0.0,0.10776969493558916,0.0,0.0,0.13280495631114184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291939264330856,0.0,0.0,0.10404248360975824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125307175555509,0.0,0.0,0.06770586195063652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0599725678812295,0.2234813203325608,0.07563307484735893,0.0,0.041739365522101404,0.1280003087269042,0.10342847072871388,0.03798391607105585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04422608476378018,0.0708540962711111,0.0,0.06781349830733897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0537476874098214,0.07684304184652008,0.05170545149582433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490829449793847,0.0,0.07064203156493097,0.14226905463990114,0.0,0.13276735273454507,0.046273901629610995,0.0,0.0,0.08389661896341771
mentalhealth,manicxcherry,2020/02/25,"looking for help for my partner and have nowhere else turn my partner suffers from pretty severe depression and starting next month they will no longer have health insurance. im trying to get them to look for another job with benefits but in the mean time i need a place/solution for right now. its the worst it has been since our relationship started and im very worried. money is already tight, they live paycheck to paycheck sometimes not even til the next one. is there any sources or links or places that i can find free mental health care for them?? any advice at all would help i just want to give them a chance to get better. ALSO they use to be on antidepressant but stopped because of the side affects. they were suppose to go back on a different type but it never happened.",5.194270896888348,6.797090953020136,4.8189017693715686,84.63938377059183,69.0,7.565832824893228,30.995118974984752,8.00094639256281,2.1242295302013425,628,26,117,8,11,191,107,149,0.11199999999999999,0.733,0.155,0.8004,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,7,1,6,7,0,0,7,0,11,2,0,2,2,23,26,10,0,3,7,0,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,2,4,4,0,2,3,0,2,1,3,3,0,1,2,3,13,5,20,21,2,19,0,2,2,0,14,7,0,2,11,75,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806648945379628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446236486885705,0.1048055038071744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17824526377857125,0.1374237320893667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10077403973828426,0.0,0.0798905729836262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590845700273884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336204130646661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11287841395267965,0.0,0.0,0.13692571493560293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094805422491064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656130810820359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978288738818425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694279052053224,0.12572093867018844,0.07448219328132487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589246312615525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786129797443274,0.0,0.0,0.17568826243329916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831261222253911,0.0,0.13005294205442286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157249240938342,0.0,0.22010820812516887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275849694823495,0.0,0.0,0.13207370893707238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460771668098404,0.0,0.0,0.09717642640512557,0.1010785320859382,0.0,0.2787592663446839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880699493883021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27385142987120586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13333115393505704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070518889510786,0.0,0.1119211804924245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805607239299182,0.0,0.10841094778952616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961781913807294,0.0,0.18552434297795475,0.0,0.0,0.109568755344137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641985707544431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897847895230512,0.14255138675325033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319037885275188,0.0,0.1081349954099147,0.07730027446575252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309381590831146,0.0,0.09309848258517764,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plzdontjudgeme123,2020/02/25,"i cant fall in love with real people ok so i masturbate to furry hentai, ya that's weird OK are we past that? cool thanks so i don't have an unhealthy masturbation problem like doing it to often or letting it get in the way of school/work but i think overtime i've just fallen in love with furries, which is ridiculous because they are just cartoon animals and i cant legitimetly fall in love with them. what i mean is the only thing i find attractive are cartoon animals, i dont have anything against humans and i have plenty of friends and had a girlfriend in the past and like people for there personality but the thought of hugging/kissing or falling in love with another human just makes me sad that i can never have what a really love,  cartoon animals.       anyway if that wasnt too cringe for you i would love some emotional support or some way to move away from furries and toward people.         also sorry if this subreddit doesn't fit the topic perfectly i couldnt find one that fits better, or anyone going through the same problem.   thank you in advance (:",4.059753228120513,6.039440082926832,4.999770444763278,80.69480631276902,72.5609756097561,7.360114777618362,29.13199426111909,8.124751697461798,2.1740645624103303,847,35,151,13,17,276,121,205,0.198,0.619,0.183,-0.6863,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,3,2,3,10,23,1,0,9,3,21,6,0,1,2,38,36,16,0,6,11,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,3,12,10,0,0,5,0,0,7,8,5,0,1,3,1,19,18,24,30,3,23,0,1,0,6,17,11,0,9,5,113,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09300824007661683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195484971770668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813224376539378,0.0,0.09570825477785193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927140512028803,0.0,0.0,0.07089781854959162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286140712280974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13630738267733988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13082630834758935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21259943691063984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985615609655398,0.0,0.06076402228326305,0.0,0.06609822444905059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189286856910721,0.0,0.11364048668838594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6298132240401987,0.0,0.07763380082566186,0.0,0.0,0.12668911531179994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236127105411878,0.0,0.0,0.08970078895987721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881057774361079,0.08845440746251966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22205059239013308,0.2418915792318325,0.10155213758862146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225743776993476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237937617811546,0.07450729914208554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770582337930907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019276867119542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198036304192332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141541330430973,0.0,0.0,0.07726718750275137,0.07452288565379436,0.0,0.09233235820728293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18463335037811246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08467067286387599,0.0,0.0,0.08261900095420552,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway5293873,2020/02/25,"I don’t like talking about mental illness because I don’t want to sound like I’m accessorizing it I’ve had a lot of personal issues that I’ve been dealing with my whole life, but I’ve kept quiet about it all this time. 

I have traumatic memories that I self-harm over. I don’t really feel happy or sad about anything, just numb. I can’t focus on anything even if I eliminated every possible distraction. I spend all of my time in bed and don’t want to get up. My heart starts pounding out of nervousness when I casually talk to anyone, even with people like my parents. My ears have always been sensitive to sound and are always ringing, even when there’s complete silence. There’s a lot more baggage than the ones I just listed. 

I’m scared of talking to someone about these problems because I don’t want to sound like a self-diagnoser, or seem like I’m trying to accessorize mental illness as a way to justify my small issues. I don’t want to go around mentioning that I’m possibly depressed, anxious, autistic or whatever because I want the label to support my sob story. I also feel like that receiving a potential diagnosis will cause me to try to intentionally exemplify more symptoms of said mental illness, as a means to prove that I really am mentally ill. 

Yet, at the same time, a lot of these problems have been affecting my life heavily and I don’t know what to do. I stay away from talking to anyone because I always convince myself that it’s not a big deal and that I can get through it on my own. I’ve never sought professional help and I still hold the personal stigma of asking for help as a weakness or excuse to avoid pushing through it myself.",7.388327318657524,6.662686555214728,8.032381811620358,71.62977805846266,63.8159509202454,11.106171057380008,36.96788163118008,10.46071229359064,3.873391771923494,1331,58,242,28,17,446,162,326,0.187,0.701,0.11199999999999999,-0.9858,1,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,0,18,21,0,4,13,0,20,11,2,3,4,44,42,17,0,8,9,1,2,6,0,1,9,7,1,2,16,9,0,3,6,1,1,3,10,11,0,1,6,9,32,10,46,35,10,25,0,3,0,0,16,11,1,9,15,163,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881170951878658,0.2147938498626058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720855371053116,0.0,0.12033204697976588,0.0,0.1416186054246028,0.07660002260366977,0.0804422765600558,0.0,0.08084393578088246,0.0,0.0,0.20981367205879065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839391355432376,0.0,0.0,0.09021858300358146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17742124059549275,0.07411210623197659,0.08733583623862796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17049958368789825,0.0,0.07249826095682607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701583997051117,0.06147195353089398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991195290018579,0.0,0.048902460865283284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915985712453918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196604218399677,0.11535090468782185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796213063446636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04728914974984761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155500161420865,0.2522291407664444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194621025359937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373034684718594,0.0,0.0,0.3468603218078119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636470734666515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05830763573457305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955449476344348,0.0,0.0,0.0596541162067285,0.150265743916961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940099996999616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646706078080357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024775055137287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185034768914122,0.0,0.08614800131612374,0.0,0.0,0.07833390553969692,0.17953145613547694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290729587784267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06090446939289866,0.09171459271390844,0.06871720012036063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764505162492663,0.0,0.0894357209394227,0.0,0.27664509469676524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15052399393692972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684045254635485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25376358297204793,0.06830005848531888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606833935030988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DoozyES,2020/02/25,"I can be happy during the day but my mood swings dramatically. I've struggled with depression for what seems like forever now. I'm very introverted, but at school I'm usually able to forget my feelings and socialize. I'm a jokester at school and my peers seem to think that I'm just happy all the time and I don't need help. In reality, my work/school day ends and I'm left to go home only to fall into the same emotions that make me feel trapped and alone. Everyday, usually towards the end I'll have a moment where I can physically feel the happiness drain out of me. I love my family but they are no more mentally stable than I am and talking to them almost always turns into me being their therapist. Even at school I'll try to be inclusive and kind, especially to those who seem to need friends, but nobody ever wants to know if I'm okay because they just assume that I am. The second I let my emotions show nobody wants me. I feel like a piece of shit for feeling this way because I know there are others in much worse situations than me, and I really shouldn't feel the way I do. I just can't help it. I wish I could just be the way I am at school and work all the time. I wish I wasn't an introvert that needed alone time because being alone makes me think too much, and when I think too much I always end up feeling hopeless. Does anyone relate to me? If you have experienced something like this and got better, how did you do it? I've been to two therapists but I just couldn't open up to a stranger.",4.061662058371738,4.803871845161293,5.278755760368664,83.5090860215054,70.87096774193549,8.614439324116743,26.37480798771121,8.841846274778883,1.7519969278033796,1192,36,252,21,21,397,153,310,0.146,0.6990000000000001,0.155,0.6285,0,4,1,0,0,1,25.0,0,2,4,2,14,16,1,1,14,1,25,2,1,3,3,63,59,20,0,12,12,0,7,3,1,1,0,0,1,0,12,16,0,0,16,1,0,2,6,4,0,2,4,8,39,11,31,46,8,35,0,2,0,1,13,15,1,7,18,164,51,5,0.07897399371694354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908104693776179,0.24537972054125254,0.0,0.0,0.13142537849445754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055220452643701866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14442544067922142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984607968911043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305430781062417,0.0,0.0,0.10186338518387528,0.0,0.06802018506667687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911067409804945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17767022664521864,0.2098425531299873,0.0,0.0,0.05216157802856754,0.07143649866344325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07444965277088489,0.0,0.27952136888405743,0.05641903689113454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061015111642248925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044882740585738407,0.0,0.06316271718706375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522078544813973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058692065762518,0.0,0.07921735484395391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223926161061862,0.0868040831969388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580547524824614,0.08075625922735175,0.0,0.11574811259877528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712771126801168,0.0,0.1054315080983424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795872107851212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741649167384013,0.17567464699581828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06006328092618679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050592762619757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3996294893092363,0.0,0.21568487347240495,0.0,0.0,0.08106566966365801,0.0,0.08877007781847115,0.0,0.08050404116488198,0.0,0.060798038683547065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825607653253323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347630466796562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833897872508108,0.0,0.15181003903114415,0.0,0.0,0.13815111248515166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05361815774470785,0.08590102721085703,0.07714611649135082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17395739343484212,0.06516181564218411,0.093161815279751,0.18805764082704332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181632390578098,0.0,0.0,0.114988016003321,0.0,0.08048124653460324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wow-its-lit,2020/02/25,"I don't know what's happening to me anymore Sometimes I feel like I am on top of the world I will feel so happy that my face hurts from smiling and my ribs hurt from laughing. Everything seems brighter and bigger and better and I feel better I feel like I could fly and it's amazing but it only lasts a little while. Some times I will be happy for a few months, sometimes a week, some times 5 minutes, and then my sadness comes back and I feel like I am falling. I'm tired all the time. God, I'm so fucking tired and done with everything. I just want to be left alone but at the same time not be alone. I know it's confusing and contradicting. 
Some times I feel I make these feelings up or exaggerate. Everyone gets sad sometimes and I  don't have a reason to be sad I live an okay life with a good family I have friends and good grades there is no reason I should feel this way. I was perfectly fine 5 seconds ago. Why am I like this?  I feel dirty and disgusting and I fucking hate my self for being so fucked up. I don't know what's wrong with me. 
I go from hanging with friends, going to parties, going on road trips, having the time of my life, sleeping my days away, binge eating, having the energy to move or do the basics like showering or brushing my hair. Everything feels like a. Chore the things I love doing I just can't. Sometimes it'll get really bad and I feel like I can't breathe and just want everything to be over. 
I've tried talking to people my friends just laugh it off and say ""same lol"" my dad just thinks I'm being a teenager 
But I know these shits not normal but I don't know what it is and I've tried looking up symptoms to find answers but nothing matches. 
I don't really know what I expect to get from this.",2.0275833333333324,3.830984758333333,3.2525000000000013,91.78125000000004,77.80555555555556,6.277777777777778,23.19444444444445,7.1686216300943375,0.7174444444444443,1363,43,297,16,32,441,167,360,0.17,0.588,0.242,0.9767,1,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,4,10,37,6,1,15,2,32,16,6,3,2,75,71,30,0,6,15,1,12,7,3,4,5,1,2,1,17,22,1,0,23,0,0,8,10,14,0,1,2,15,43,23,30,57,7,38,0,5,1,4,8,15,4,8,21,184,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636046576668698,0.0,0.0,0.1486288258474231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115964224625669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674142551141783,0.05517358674375858,0.05991071312926361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691930031552195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061808809891612373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05728888911750672,0.0,0.0,0.04627471446090197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342817626769445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342117731951073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068563015199134,0.2579476863042528,0.0,0.06764229202607247,0.0,0.39908490203337627,0.2563015962589101,0.0,0.0,0.06558089310395218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663084452150371,0.19900332823170813,0.1124638590157642,0.0,0.12233655897525905,0.12036593430541748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06345089354207557,0.15276469138681692,0.0,0.07084117952089061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536260263219674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366012570696252,0.0584882280618344,0.0,0.0,0.0779597862200857,0.0,0.10136245607134847,0.24538405664015256,0.07191530247758368,0.0633591662544057,0.0,0.06025440354255085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647598355565363,0.0,0.04789564889902532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05727251726093261,0.07626202659886455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030265288816889,0.0688488872674721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545713490559355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049744458501762165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193354961810364,0.1475479586903958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057060822937133625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06532118755890473,0.0748539718411322,0.0,0.07365336837168843,0.0,0.0,0.07180476552915922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838619948678872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745787850318448,0.0,0.05767230037056147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04766946928642001,0.0459763908021428,0.0,0.0,0.2510383204393377,0.16493891322553544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743108124974104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464349369398726,0.056954149035027664,0.05755588553860185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474587367759257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845058293243021,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,julia_lll,2020/02/25,"Should I seek help? Alright, here goes nothing.
I’m debating on whether or not to seek professional help concerning how I have been feeling mentally the past few months.
It all began last semester, where I gradually stopped attending my lectures etc - I wasn’t uninspired, just seemingly lazy. Winter break came around, I went on holiday and had a great time before my second semester at uni started. I’m lucky to be able to live close enough to my university to live at home, which eased going back to uni and the workload a lot as my parents were there to support me. Here is where my life turns completely upside down. I have been horse riding for about 10 years now, and after a month long break I was finally coming back to my lesson, naturally I was super excited, yet for some reason nervous. I ended up falling in a nasty way and got a mild traumatic brain injury. This resulted in me missing two weeks of the second semester, and being bedridden for those two weeks. I spent my time calculating the what-ifs, wallowing in self pity and pain. Everything seemed so pointless. I got a job, yet the training weekend was mandatory and after my accident I wasn’t able to attend. I lost my job. I lost the will to get up in the morning. I started crying a lot, for no reason. I also started to do...nothing.
Two weeks went by, and I decided it was time to go back to university. The response of my friends who all huddled around me to ask me how I was comforted me and made me feel, for the first time in a while, happy. 
It’s only after I got home that the emotions got to me and I broke down. Ever since the accident I feel like a tipped balance. I have class but I can’t get out of bed. I’ve missed 1 month of my second semester. I don’t even have the will to play video games and I can’t return to sport for another month. I realized I have absolutely 0 purpose. I love my degree, but have no more inspiration for it. Nothing that I do (or rather not do) makes me happy anymore. Everything is repetitive.
I know if I told my parents they would support me, but I don’t want this to just be some sort of weird laziness. I’ve grown up being told I’m lazy especially by my father and I can’t help but think that maybe I just lost myself too much in the pleasure of staying in bed. I’m scared of going to a therapist and not knowing what to say other than ‘I have 0 energy for anything’. I know that a possible side effect of a concussion can be depression, therefore I was wondering if it will potentially go away? I also haven’t given suicide much thought as the reason stopping me is how my family would feel if I have died. I know there is something to live for, but I can’t find it now. What confuses me the most however is how happy I can be hanging out with my best friend and how sad I can be once I get home. My mind is panicked about not doing things but my body refuses to do them. It’s a vicious cycle. 
I know this is poorly written, and I apologize for that. My head has been all over the place lately and I feel as though I just had to let my thought process loose. 
Tl;dr After a traumatic accident, I feel as though I have no purpose in my life. I have no urge to do anything. Am I being lazy or should I reach out to someone?",3.3846094946401237,4.759775303215927,4.899418376722816,83.19747672281778,73.1500765696784,8.225531393568147,28.06765696784073,8.784430282132071,2.138187895865237,2535,98,513,49,50,852,283,653,0.154,0.725,0.121,-0.9658,5,0,1,0,0,1,71.0,0,0,2,8,35,34,1,3,30,1,64,7,3,13,4,103,122,44,2,9,22,3,6,1,2,7,3,1,5,1,22,25,0,3,26,6,2,14,17,15,0,7,33,7,87,19,81,73,15,89,0,9,0,1,20,29,0,17,43,375,109,5,0.12681821842532168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014164834565694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664899797515559,0.0,0.0,0.06288479780304215,0.0,0.0,0.10436058815153766,0.11289510142219332,0.059278957513287635,0.0,0.0595749454055302,0.14627307292143027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053956481638402914,0.0,0.0665439480875314,0.0,0.0,0.07043322577484107,0.0,0.0707855365328111,0.0,0.07252312855984537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05462133296047002,0.06648324460068722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965192900772227,0.0,0.0,0.05461417285058687,0.0,0.06580864435547266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132671323147115,0.05616164994168293,0.0655185601400021,0.07071791821315833,0.04188111860941072,0.05735716952286458,0.0,0.0,0.1139760374347496,0.0,0.05977646489949377,0.0,0.1923693050908624,0.045299480291264,0.0,0.06946157972969777,0.05795477706750131,0.05393575590373085,0.0,0.0,0.09797944096921099,0.0,0.09938592734743834,0.0,0.14414743211620154,0.0,0.2028562286789181,0.0699087667607788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025005275334166,0.0,0.0,0.06507603958064076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750536789576794,0.0,0.19081351980914302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12584751341501274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742399406590569,0.05168688710938752,0.07152823709827336,0.0,0.0,0.06484011026853356,0.08957545813409146,0.030978487843483806,0.0,0.16797421543054036,0.05611506628490399,0.0,0.0,0.20765559938546851,0.1078163142428012,0.057229196721337826,0.05999923230513993,0.042326072779253536,0.0,0.06370297296766828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06390146810470966,0.0,0.06402512439964954,0.0,0.2024501840614269,0.0,0.09322598243384267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18252825132804176,0.0,0.0,0.0675286318620312,0.0,0.04822548488012195,0.06747176287688053,0.0,0.14081662363701314,0.0,0.06053116963374574,0.0,0.0,0.06624902318629433,0.0,0.0,0.07148424324354423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955853751285248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050425468701194825,0.06348358013041301,0.0,0.0,0.11545054309523035,0.06614952992167167,0.0,0.0,0.05245267039236758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05372633246555061,0.04881543016069489,0.0,0.0,0.1346438815968461,0.06758567357025687,0.0,0.10602570914748942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935927376377175,0.14391181140517412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362286305256482,0.042126194607344895,0.04062999683586082,0.12459825571161424,0.10067949969724407,0.1478974460178046,0.0,0.0,0.12118024238075073,0.0,0.0,0.06897090243929721,0.18582445799052494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03740033548699765,0.050331199441920285,0.15258888789567002,0.0,0.0,0.11756175901763515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876447408962491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900880237769064,0.0,0.0,0.04083338738364544
mentalhealth,imstuckinasoapopera,2020/02/25,"I think I have a pathological lying issue I recently got into a big issue, involving a romantic relationship, where I told a massive lie to my partner to make myself look better in a certain situation. I feel awful but know that if I go back and tell him I lied he'd never look at me again, and ik that's selfish. I victimize myself and I hate it. I realized I've done this before, where I lie to make myself look better and just want to stop. I feel awful for it all, and am surprised at how elaborately I can come up with them. I feel like I'm going to go to hell, but I just need to push forward and do better. Ik I can't fess up to my old lies, hit I'm hoping me being better, will allow me to be forgiven.",5.1127631578947375,3.917747381578948,7.423947368421054,75.67763157894737,68.60526315789474,10.23157894736842,29.52631578947368,9.516144504307137,2.42305,550,16,117,10,8,201,91,152,0.22,0.589,0.191,-0.8765,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,4,8,12,3,0,5,2,10,1,0,4,3,31,33,10,0,4,5,0,3,1,1,1,1,0,0,1,5,9,0,1,6,0,0,6,2,4,0,0,3,6,27,8,17,25,1,21,1,0,3,0,8,10,1,2,8,81,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136988713160861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12582201781804642,0.0,0.0,0.523097447375384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737239568464068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513169843970659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22429459258478196,0.10563461225201504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521048475746277,0.0,0.11826095421858583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145985835425801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686306779716726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30866478057156704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126260368546938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223925154239035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3725074666486317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19740174754496104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963984404602573,0.11404241650235185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515918939220769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599860942383286,0.15875141263799875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16620618264061324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236215581561527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12924031539590056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474576604324653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14129111232832892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721446497535605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sam_148_357,2020/02/25,"Best way to find a therapist near by I’ve stopped going to therapy 4 years ago because my therapist got sick, and I’ve been procrastinating/lying to myself ever since. I’m living in a new place now, and I’ve finally decided that I can no longer prolong my mental health issues. unfortunately, I have absolutely no idea how to actually find a place to do therapy. About a year ago I tried googling places near me, and sent them an email but I was basically ghosted.

What’s the best way to find someone near me? Should i contact my health insurance company or should I literally google it then call the clinic’s office? 

Into: 
CT, USA. 
Anthem Blue cross blue shield.",3.961546170365072,6.128181031496066,5.544223335719402,75.87699355762348,73.33070866141732,9.027630637079458,28.08088761632069,9.573946990214177,2.8355574803149595,529,21,97,14,11,179,87,127,0.07400000000000001,0.855,0.07,0.644,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,2,4,2,0,0,7,0,7,4,0,1,1,16,11,7,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,5,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,4,2,13,2,13,5,2,23,0,0,2,0,5,8,0,1,10,56,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.12901296536285267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343834317736149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059091353399915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27748188791526474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349960405355468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195869507452813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482406616165844,0.3624988015419193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513512263565955,0.0,0.10573637972899286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28105537013267995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924330224151006,0.0,0.13798762517659546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167393974416265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332314997821292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768436943631062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.414378119001018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10936130500948164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201682941696056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052926219188633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30237577581734904,0.30700028508498645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975848633732632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20987627941481615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027131312204685
mentalhealth,the_curly_one_,2020/02/25,"I feel unworthy and I have this urge to prove others that I’m not I don’t even know where should I start. Let me introduce myself. I’m just 18yo. Here I am, sharing my chaos with some strangers on the internet. 

I‘ll start with my early childhood. I was this confident little girl that always had to be the president of the class. I guess that I gained this confidence thanks to my teacher, who was always telling me how special i was. I was always the 1st at reading competitions, my grades were always As without any effort. I had many friends and no insecurities, even though i was always kind of shy

the moment when everything changed happened when our class (in case you don’t know how does school system in central europe work - you have the same classmates through the years, you have the same schedule as them, etc...) was split into two smaller classes. Uhm, me and my best friend at the time and two ppl of our group of friends were in one class while the rest of our group were in the other one. if i could turn back time, i’d get myself relegated to the other class to most of my friends. But i didn’t. The only thing i cared about was staying in the same class with my best friend... (she cut me out of her life just few years ago after 12 years of friendship... just like that, I still didn’t get over it)

but i the new smaller class worked everything differently. the most of the ppl that were part of it i didn’t talk to. and i have never had the chance to befriend them, because they were already this “closed society”. because they group wasn’t split. they were all in one class... 

you know, our group of friends fell apart. and there i was, just me and my best friend at the time , all alone against the elite kids in the class. 

i started to feel like nothing. i started to compare myself to the other girls in my class. i found myself being afraid to speak in front of the class and pretending not knowing the answers to questions because i was too afraid of failure. 

i even started having social anxiety - being extroverted. It’s painful to be afraid of things that make you more alive. 

I’m at high school at the moment. everything is different. I’m not afraid of speaking in front of class anymore (or answering to questions) I have friends at school and amazing group of friends that fulfill my needs but i still feel like i have to show to everyone that i’m better than i was at primary school. that i’m not that unpopular quiet kid anymore. i ALWAYS compare myself to others (for example, when i’m staying on friday night at home i look at snapchat map and see who other does so i don’t feel like “something less”) i’m a really big dreamer, but i don’t daydream (i mean heavy daydream i can stare at a blank wall for hours but this is not the problem i want to solve here) about future - i visualise myself showing you everyone that i’m worthy, like doing something cool or whatever, doing something that makes their jaw drop

i blame myself for everything. i constantly compare myself to others. i feel like i’m not good enough. i’m scared of the future because failure scares me. and i’m scared that i’m going to fail. i’m leaving to university in a year (at least i want to) and i’m going to meet new people there and i’m afraid i’ll never find friends again and i’ll be alone again. that i will be that scared kid again. and later in life as well - at work, love life,... i’m blaming myself for wasting my gifts 

the trigger that made me post this here was this ugly gesture from one of my closest friends. she was one of the popular kids at my primary school and she had known me even before my transformation to my actual self. we argued and she reminded me that i was this scared kid... and it hurt me. it literally opened my wounds. 

i have other mental problems. i can’t concentrate and i’m unable to pay attention to anything. i’m always moody and the fact that i’m always feeling unworthy doesn’t help to any of these. When i’m having mood swings it looks like this - good mood : let’s prove them i’m better than they think i am, bad mood : i’m nothing and not good enough for this world i’m going to end up dying alone 

(sorry for mistakes english isn’t my 1st language 

What should i do to stop comparing myself to others and to stop having this urge to seek appreciation from everyone?",3.338133802816902,5.163277296948364,3.9784976525821603,87.91204225352112,74.15258215962443,6.771830985915493,25.615023474178404,7.522901235351305,1.229768544600939,3395,116,683,42,71,1075,319,852,0.131,0.7240000000000001,0.145,0.9228,2,3,3,0,0,0,100.0,5,6,8,12,32,60,2,11,33,1,64,7,1,6,7,101,126,42,1,10,20,0,6,7,11,3,5,3,1,8,50,30,0,2,22,4,1,6,22,21,1,7,29,14,108,36,106,85,20,96,0,2,4,1,62,42,0,9,50,459,158,24,0.0,0.0,0.04728270858474233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04295027042621037,0.0,0.0,0.1505467169569103,0.0534686041200463,0.0,0.322531286831971,0.0,0.0,0.06589880376875629,0.0,0.0370660753017483,0.0,0.09610383861875822,0.0,0.0,0.039872327940397995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0372570273617358,0.04045586321376108,0.11814492189956098,0.0,0.041229559328902,0.0,0.15254391533758976,0.0857047026242622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049400613477098086,0.0,0.05125638323914697,0.0,0.0,0.052360003597815584,0.0,0.038685426040674216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050286106959157965,0.10124522389158416,0.0,0.0,0.08480232245102069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04291458612511896,0.10012889204079717,0.05403741155929367,0.1280098340021113,0.0,0.0,0.13889549061623466,0.17418414451043726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14699441914052352,0.13845807239646235,0.0,0.0,0.04428476147705617,0.0,0.0,0.05312573046214338,0.4117775989989049,0.0,0.05062892493608781,0.0,0.08261011824824739,0.12191912396410765,0.0,0.0,0.053375956741926266,0.0,0.042846438238694315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03247672921326061,0.05119278921029082,0.04860186763381249,0.0,0.04771601095999918,0.0,0.05186946693111048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05045588450883277,0.10651303795544644,0.0,0.0,0.051304264381340337,0.0,0.09909204944550501,0.10267042679793276,0.16570031154282525,0.04856219343829297,0.0,0.0,0.08137589357298175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04373032655058125,0.04584698321494487,0.06468491924683291,0.04912329027681983,0.0,0.05277904151439965,0.0,0.0,0.04882878368688698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03592695883676112,0.07473920159180088,0.09359156754367563,0.0,0.04546944470749218,0.0,0.09298307498703423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16416354097455882,0.03685035476099118,0.0515569393349402,0.0,0.0,0.05246940013619262,0.0,0.0335909039247759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046404158357220435,0.0,0.0,0.0927251113224988,0.0,0.0,0.1085559107793329,0.0,0.048465671326157485,0.0,0.031039950234617013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24254732276085456,0.2451828842333276,0.03861041664824071,0.0,0.0505465865391676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04939128250861066,0.0,0.11190344215534072,0.0,0.05423867335137702,0.17147485454956413,0.10328796295218146,0.07738855301194716,0.08101701839976964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03894433187567459,0.04234967252716422,0.04460860686628041,0.0,0.0,0.06437945496535928,0.031046443619202738,0.047604393579319365,0.0,0.08475923105099417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05270247109783725,0.09466222015519568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715714976435779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04356466979700244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046706538204340585,0.0,0.10582212087761964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480743863297457
mentalhealth,somethingswrong_help,2020/02/25,something is wrong i need help its getting worse dont know what  it is but its getting worse. nobody cares about me and i cant focus on anything. i layed on the floor for 15 min before even thinking about finishing emptying the dishes. my grades are slipping and i cant keep up. always sad and its getting worse. plz help,1.3364062499999996,3.928317328125004,2.2800000000000007,92.965,86.65625,4.45,22.0625,5.985473137389443,0.33650625000000023,255,9,50,2,8,80,45,64,0.242,0.616,0.142,-0.8225,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,8,14,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,6,14,0,6,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,30,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17587162622365268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17393441052070915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798550390290954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154994962256695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477168172236935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139603806500173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33128660911970936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833454199008975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18786987050378212,0.0,0.0,0.11616002517613205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15672359076738304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16271819121958847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543339826414352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6461933549224346,0.0,0.23109315144082285,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wouldntuliketoknow_,2020/02/25,"what is wrong with me lately ever since I started grad school, all I want to do is cry and someone to hold me. I don't want responsibilities, but I still am responsible and independent. I just want someone there with me all the time and to act like a parent. probably because my parents never were there for me as a kid and now I'm under extreme stress and can't handle it. I feel like a baby and its embarrassing when I cry so much in front of my boyfriend (long distance that I see once a week) but I just want to be loved and feel affection all week not just when I get to see him. I know this is all over the place and I apologize for that it's just a lot of thoughts at once",3.1381249999999987,3.82647434027778,4.612111111111112,87.64399999999998,72.95833333333333,7.704444444444445,25.511111111111113,7.908726449838941,1.1212911111111104,531,16,123,7,10,178,84,144,0.10300000000000001,0.722,0.175,0.8338,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,12,6,0,2,7,0,9,1,0,2,6,35,23,14,0,4,7,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,10,0,1,4,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,2,4,19,3,16,20,6,19,0,0,2,1,6,5,0,1,14,88,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046479907233658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32602640064001753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423857599382202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500735467198183,0.10601879029500244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753419187132435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155814420373686,0.0,0.16740450707898086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450039508275758,0.0,0.0,0.13133156068452093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261665160018625,0.13393906876942802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090929279778649,0.0,0.1144571725321738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31608768198913656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295668735144822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550490480525668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16000301706309575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019127357501,0.2365151901933941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276009850412645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25148194806478896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504006783108027,0.0,0.11851444456794186,0.0,0.1699945858290862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11781502455190802,0.08653470312302868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3501266062624934,0.0,0.2380791008806705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16225485954508315,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,climbingbeaver,2020/02/26,Anyone out there willing to chat? I just need someone to talk to right now.. If you want to chat just private message me.,1.0175000000000018,3.5302024166666683,1.788333333333334,96.49000000000002,87.33333333333334,3.2,24.66666666666667,3.1291,0.03551666666666708,94,4,19,0,3,29,19,24,0.0,0.9440000000000001,0.055999999999999994,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,5,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,14,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37483037233638256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974867414215555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4577981201379216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4542076619792868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4308701898325509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161860890036105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mrskwavustyles,2020/02/26,"Just wanted to tell someone I finally plucked up the courage, after 8 long months of silently suffering every day, to tell my mum that I need to speak to someone about my mental health and that I think I’m depressed. She’s making me an appointment tomorrow so...step one complete :)",7.309748427672957,7.3751353207547155,7.107547169811323,75.57125786163523,63.716981132075475,10.085534591194973,38.42138364779875,9.725611199111238,3.8249044025157235,224,11,39,4,3,71,43,53,0.115,0.773,0.11199999999999999,-0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,5,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,7,1,8,5,0,7,0,2,0,0,5,1,0,0,6,22,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631653712150919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187217267785808,0.0,0.2161831775533007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114756308730137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749547276843293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266797863114785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221242711351304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754231418654492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529457410806247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20034325250327192,0.0,0.0,0.1861109481246021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17008192871034267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.425337551205373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43876453571306495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608286157512053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480444167717857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Elvensabre,2020/02/26,"I Worked So Hard to Get Where I Am, and I Feel Like I Don't Belong First post here, so I'm sorry if I break any of the rules. I'm trying my best to read and follow them.  

I'm a U.S.-based first-year grad student who was admitted to my first-choice program.  I've only been here a couple of months, but each day I feel my sense of belonging and community diminishing into nothing.  This has had a horrible effect on my mental health, as I feel like no one loves me, I'm not supported, and that everyone around me would be better off without me.  

I worked so hard to be admitted to this program, and I can't tell if I'm truly unhappy or just adjusting.  I feel like I never say the right things, or get the right information from my class's readings, or that anybody likes me.  I want nothing more to feel loved and supported.

The breaking point was today in class, when I tried to make a lighthearted comment which was misheard, and construed by some as inappropriate until they realized what I had actually said.  I'm not sure if the professor heard the correction, and on my walk home I felt more horrible and isolated, to the point where I figured I was a horrible embarrassment who was admitted by mistake.  

These feelings are the culmination of many months of criticism and isolation, where I feel like the nature of my personality simply does not fit with academia.  I've never been more critical of my personality than I am at the moment, and my self-confidence is shattered.  I just want to love myself again, but I feel like ""myself"" is shameful, embarrassing, and unwanted.  

Has anyone been in a similar situation, and finally adjusted once they found a community?  I am currently in therapy (meeting every 2 weeks) but I don't know how to talk to my therapist about these feelings without being hospitalized for suicide ideation.  I've been in adjustment periods before, but this one feels so much worse since the light at the end of the tunnel is 5+ years away, only to be thrust into more academia.  Does anyone have any ways to reassure myself?  I'm open to any help.",7.999848484848485,7.085483227272732,8.520888888888887,69.238,62.686868686868685,12.364444444444445,37.22424242424242,11.602472056035307,4.351696363636362,1642,69,302,44,20,550,202,396,0.17600000000000002,0.677,0.147,-0.9431,1,1,0,0,0,1,50.0,0,0,3,6,16,19,0,3,20,0,29,4,0,3,4,71,65,32,1,8,17,0,13,6,0,1,1,3,1,2,12,19,0,0,23,2,0,2,11,4,0,3,15,17,43,15,47,45,8,45,0,0,0,3,23,22,0,7,23,205,55,11,0.0,0.0,0.07885757494576268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16485793684124006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300655866404455,0.0,0.0,0.07193682119846531,0.0,0.0,0.07592237646377582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876220001086841,0.0,0.08480368120687415,0.07146867441280585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941322212581287,0.0,0.05211488706808288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143236921951685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157246894100276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808476366429976,0.07721611760930727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40859275941604256,0.2886485394888404,0.07758896599381729,0.08852191420585256,0.0,0.20620736133488346,0.0,0.08860250177839275,0.0,0.0,0.08443835732074093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477733634441864,0.0,0.0,0.08589580454883676,0.0,0.0,0.05416432739545637,0.0,0.08105765372067023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04441031470425783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23687411548477766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21879885522111928,0.0,0.053940394068432686,0.08192727659931041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814361017875708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290013694921956,0.0,0.05940364767745576,0.0,0.1246492082903592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15507613721697033,0.0,0.0,0.08605856330062099,0.10951605035537623,0.12291722277858334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14111797340241164,0.0,0.0,0.15278056716271218,0.0,0.07739233865782334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16166101407026628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13802027246934978,0.07686752074749237,0.06426227320955423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430103425908905,0.0,0.0,0.06684574129194266,0.09083229606366697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045865553787548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839153536947003,0.18340137198133785,0.0761611859922903,0.0,0.0,0.06495092310743092,0.07063031233191687,0.0,0.09241172131900098,0.09382505828530677,0.05368566910458688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765971411319766,0.0,0.0,0.10972752301997654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532605800598062,0.06414213636103706,0.06481981595979522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579328880048282,0.0,0.1176593033380672,0.0,0.0823509068872635,0.057404138682038676,0.0,0.0,0.10407622829124884
mentalhealth,Iwannabehomern,2020/02/26,"Should I tell my family I want to try therapy? First timer here, just need to vent to an unbiased source. I moved from a southern state east side of USA to an upper-west state after living in a toxic home most of my life. Living here for the past two years has changed me so much I honestly feel like a different person on some days, but others I remember how I used to behave or I remember something from my past and can have a variety of adverse reactions because of it. I don’t have goals (besides passing high school) or I am overly ambitious and take on more then I can chew. Since softmore year started, everything is either extremely up, down, or numb. I have so many things to get off of my chest, and I try to with my family, but I either am told, “ You’re just being overdramatic! Everyone has those thoughts. Quit worrying so much about your emotions!” Or they try to “give advice” on how to fix what I am feeling. It can make me shut down or isolate myself, and I have trouble having any motivation to do anything but stay on my YouTube, stare at the ceiling, stuff my face, or sleep. I have thought about suicide and have gotten really close to doing so but I remember everyone is hurt and just can’t. I’m stuck in a limbo of hating myself to making myself purposely/unintentionally forget my pain I carry to get on with it. I’ve asked about the topic of therapy this past summer and immediately got told “ They just want money and to stuff pills down your throat. Just get on with life like everyone else. You don’t need it.” I’m scared to explain my reasons and feelings cause I feel I’m just gonna be ignored or it’ll come out wrong as per usual. I know they care and see I’m in pain, but they view it as me torturing myself because I want to. How do I tell them I just want someone to talk to about this and how to better cope with my mixed feelings?",4.474411764705881,5.222030259358292,5.546539037433155,81.94204385026737,69.93582887700535,8.764748663101605,28.06160427807487,8.954980946260402,2.08275585026738,1463,49,296,26,25,485,193,374,0.158,0.767,0.075,-0.9905,1,0,1,0,0,1,36.0,0,3,5,6,21,16,2,1,10,0,27,11,4,10,0,72,66,34,1,7,21,0,5,2,0,3,6,0,1,1,14,18,1,1,14,0,1,3,3,11,0,2,7,8,48,5,57,54,7,40,0,1,3,0,17,22,0,9,14,205,62,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577050890334617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05968847529554128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222948900855541,0.0,0.08205566653049848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107010899269753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762785866722165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949016153493078,0.09016678547783592,0.0928519241546275,0.07560844641795524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05660615816675151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170383526611957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332286426971933,0.09873252231748794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251611852907104,0.07888448205349301,0.0,0.16548866160696002,0.0,0.22190268142650305,0.06270486534706092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465945060715441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13757290705420605,0.08419961330663925,0.0,0.0,0.07019988100491091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866574123556593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273672234812297,0.08804321807593668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396253705528876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0482376042588421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399296867391878,0.0857626576018722,0.0,0.1550098807996183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717797543054055,0.0889877852233129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328853543590714,0.12904613116475244,0.13016475397622634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867927746067113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25136704550114525,0.0,0.07663977389179251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335711665370316,0.0,0.0,0.0562294669036823,0.09024499863599016,0.0,0.0,0.298288223635157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787582811616901,0.08883070217665487,0.06994351242993939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260652027130364,0.0,0.08783613171950125,0.0,0.07436956055969304,0.06757174597598058,0.0,0.0,0.062125999467327574,0.0935540658163061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009575832535754,0.09600913507093768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599417950441103,0.07054840628729775,0.15343449275844795,0.0,0.20075156285424775,0.0,0.058312310504521674,0.0,0.0,0.13936350772974831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16774123527140264,0.0,0.17877579342732566,0.0,0.0857412163198228,0.0,0.0,0.07580746874978306,0.0966692762985778,0.0,0.2070825524326698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913748140541189,0.0,0.0,0.09596571599591547,0.0,0.11304553787782184
mentalhealth,Subject-Pen,2020/02/26,"My mind is never calm Hello, I am writing this because I feel like my mind is never calm, like it's always thinking about what happened and what could happen. It's like I do things on autopilot while I live in my head. Always thinking about the game I played, the book I readed, what I did years ago, what I could have done, things that I imagine or sometimes my mind is playing songs on repeat, but I am never paying attention to what is around me. I might be eating and then this thoughts start coming and when I realize I already finished eating. How do I stop this from happening? How do I stop living my life on autopilot while I am trapped inside my head?",6.623326063249728,5.958062870229013,6.66124318429662,80.6369465648855,65.33587786259542,9.012431842966192,31.69138495092695,7.957251820313856,2.1545629225736103,520,17,101,5,7,166,73,131,0.10800000000000001,0.825,0.067,-0.8004,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,2,0,17,5,2,2,3,28,26,11,0,2,2,0,1,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,13,5,2,2,7,6,1,1,3,0,0,0,3,2,23,7,9,19,0,20,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,17,78,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676805983761945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536404784807844,0.0,0.2192148747061042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11726498013064088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029957188267252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347116825494935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103466217062334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480248137015674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26957926482351635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666051418678313,0.09410581308427204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3494573199030375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27037986209398024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304269349123734,0.1930655120911721,0.0,0.2326347531089611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974155703023866,0.3990202327296434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047880075172322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317626723493132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13028139612024228,0.0,0.09323706639328497,0.0,0.0,0.22025938273479967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502716455822062,0.16881071761820846,0.0,0.1045765439140594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482788535355595
mentalhealth,Answer_Seeker01,2020/02/26,"This is my first time posting about anything on Reddit, and openly talking about my mental and emotional issues with anyone other than close family and a therapist. But is it normal that when I talk about my thoughts and few past attempts at suicide, that I'm not overly emotional or crying? Mental health question.",9.434761904761906,9.493482000000004,8.547142857142859,67.03119047619049,59.35714285714286,10.323809523809524,36.52380952380953,9.725611199111238,3.842138095238095,256,10,36,4,3,80,44,56,0.127,0.8190000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.7506,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,13,4,7,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,4,0,8,3,1,10,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,4,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13854770178795028,0.0,0.16305658221946953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21765315221299825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4457732669572173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867936207779973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685421704277037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106190375878555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068120655371813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3993674306561246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941401849336815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18915197418959914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18976828927094416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219679249460824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167386429199328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185231452731102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300618008233485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573051226614504,0.11554003524603745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ELDUMPLEDORE,2020/02/26,"I need to talk to some one I feel like my problems are nothing but I can't help but feel really depressed and suicidal I feel like my problems are inconsequential to everyone else's problems, I (15)m want to kill my self because my mom has cancer even though she is getting better, it hurts it really fucking hurts but at the same time I can't talk to them I feel like they won't take me seriously, I don't really fit in at school, I fill my days with video games and anime to feel happy as an escape. Everyone says it gets better and there are things to live for but if the climate situation gets worse I won't live long anyway so what's the point? Why endure the pain for much longer? I have attempted suicide before, I tried to cut my wrist but I fucked it up, I fucked that up, how could I fuck that up? My parents make me feel like a failure even though I know they don't mean too. My only real friends are online friends that I have never met and my parents just cut me off from them today when I was feeling particularly bad today and I feel so fucking bad right now, I want to die but before I do that I want to talk to someone please I know I am inconsequential and so are my problems but  please if you're reading this I just want to talk.",2.631029601029603,4.139120725868729,4.026949806949812,88.15836550836552,75.33204633204633,6.786615186615187,23.53024453024453,7.447530270364453,0.8466700128700122,984,29,213,12,21,325,130,259,0.311,0.535,0.154,-0.997,2,0,0,0,0,2,16.0,0,0,4,3,15,28,8,0,6,0,19,8,1,2,1,45,46,23,4,12,11,3,8,4,2,2,2,1,0,1,11,7,0,0,11,3,0,1,7,19,0,1,2,9,43,9,24,41,3,19,0,3,0,5,19,10,5,3,12,138,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313895947484521,0.04796280494606614,0.0,0.1339023484249634,0.0,0.0,0.13917273358300358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06281984916869186,0.0,0.0,0.050742310202517335,0.0,0.06776726150334772,0.0,0.08165777083942785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572732798348623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393524496365822,0.0,0.0,0.15036487317901678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31826515164783314,0.2248370023116332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157647093324045,0.3636935322060363,0.12332169063024084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375668492661513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0527377733548653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16845786243361338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704813868713884,0.0,0.08648131433042999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15375695919892246,0.0,0.13895236332448058,0.06962962492557308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052519737876256786,0.0,0.0,0.08570595613233495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214946321005618,0.0,0.0,0.05783910293564786,0.05834047511437983,0.060683128654818334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549590819789839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331583461005317,0.05983994400021107,0.08372142907809872,0.0,0.17473041263730174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17273477199431364,0.07437835298154913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30114583726207905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787016319625763,0.08955545217617189,0.15121392148238252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719258041110578,0.0,0.06256976432201015,0.0,0.07962870456739085,0.0,0.0,0.08208075410735217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884399986753926,0.0,0.0,0.06666559670819303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17212704312819405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05915782374964894,0.252961107558501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052271721736168016,0.0,0.15460606902845764,0.0,0.045879138952564576,0.0,0.14915952483470424,0.0,0.0,0.05341878610961685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18563081214791816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099676885650454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018198825362753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spacestar101,2020/02/26,Self help books Does anyone know any great books to help with depression and negative thinking?,5.825624999999999,9.532550312500003,3.7550000000000026,82.39000000000001,77.125,8.200000000000001,26.75,8.841846274778883,2.8607250000000013,79,3,12,2,2,22,14,16,0.265,0.39399999999999996,0.341,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521669809753037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25928253690475744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31938249870232804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32450278926469345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40882495227639176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4970990846145335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20379027903134106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3868410167479244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23760334056886606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Massacher,2020/02/26,"CBT and memory For many years now I have had trouble remembering my past. Childhood memories and teenage years. There are days where I can't even remember what I did the previous week. I have flashes and small remnants of memories but not the full memory. I have blocked out a lot which I think could be a contributing factor. 
Would CBT allow me to remember what I want when I want?",4.332100456621003,6.3338655205479455,4.99609589041096,80.91323059360731,71.87671232876713,9.798173515981736,29.97488584474885,10.125756701596842,3.2565269406392687,305,13,58,9,6,98,53,73,0.067,0.8540000000000001,0.079,-0.0644,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,4,0,10,0,0,1,0,17,13,5,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,10,0,4,8,2,12,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,8,43,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17716501011950267,0.0,0.0,0.14310384407920934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465594789658975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886470964017877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22496658586222398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118237758989732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7540909474902717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218128274424355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26175870483518904,0.0,0.17799069245291582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762776000500625,0.0,0.0,0.2857860619804459
mentalhealth,Nicojwn,2020/02/26,"Why do I have energy bursts and spaz when I get anxious? Whenever I get anxious I have a sudden energy burst where I tense up and let a loud screech from me. I have had this for years now and have learned to control it. I would always like to scream and jump around when it happens but I can contain it. I live in a single bedroom dorm in a city and walk to school every morning and back. It is about an 8-minute walk to the bus and from there I ride it for 15-20 minutes. On the way to the bus and back to my dorm at the end of the day, I get really anxious. Even though I am good at navigating the sidewalk when it is crowded (especially on my way to school and back) I still have anxieties that I can only explain has a fear of others. I am scared that someone will touch, attack or stab me. The stabbing though is a recurring one for some reason. Every time I have those thoughts I get really anxious and have an energy burst. This gets quite painful if it happens often recurringly. It also interferes with my work. I can get really excited when I work because it can be really fun. When that happens though I spaz around in my chair and it is difficult for me to work. This also gets quite painful. However, I can also have these energy bursts when I am happy. When I get really excited I can have these bursts. Something that I have noticed is that my energy bursts tend not to occur when I am in direct interaction with other people or I am in deep thought. On the street and in my room, I am not in direct contact with anybody, however, in my classrooms as well as the lunch table, where I do not experience these bursts, I am. Can somebody help me with this or at least relate? The pain has been increasing and it has been interfering with my life quite significantly.",3.911675358539764,5.1634987203389855,5.08666666666667,82.84419817470666,71.68361581920905,8.497001303780966,27.17470664928292,8.950670267944501,2.031068578878748,1393,48,282,27,26,461,153,354,0.126,0.768,0.106,-0.8281,2,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,7,28,15,1,2,18,0,41,5,0,2,0,39,56,34,0,2,8,0,1,1,0,2,4,2,4,0,26,20,1,3,5,0,0,5,3,8,1,1,5,3,42,7,42,47,4,49,0,0,0,0,5,22,0,6,21,219,68,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043314007313867,0.07086831347913583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0651548634484949,0.3848717043780124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15163882256009126,0.0,0.0968932397942614,0.0,0.1964715587357778,0.0,0.05191887858933849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095525465428333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492764332089229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543539412166783,0.0,0.0,0.05625402194981422,0.0,0.14351889928320538,0.0,0.0,0.08331266238888495,0.0,0.09583999717052093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35598273233954275,0.0,0.0,0.07143660619559293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22594681065935446,0.09066511353204484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05708769649653021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709215769262814,0.06015813277379348,0.04160978963746715,0.0,0.07520672414027635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696667880929412,0.0,0.0,0.057713437467248004,0.06477566920519713,0.2718808491196197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904619629980235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27176653059102057,0.0,0.0,0.2728106095021555,0.0875690076328765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527008897290031,0.1723932972356219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216431619190282,0.06556807389409867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801692063324816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510374571323443,0.13523102949290522,0.04966334741556768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352080599647622,0.0,0.0,0.0765781132395364,0.0,0.07685273258395024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860144560620968,0.0,0.0,0.060502367597014675,0.0,0.0,0.054846726793221584
mentalhealth,Mediaeval-britian,2020/02/26,"This week has been incredibly difficult. I just got back from a long trip away from my girlfriend, and she broke up with me. My moms alcoholic ex-boyfriend is making trouble in the house. I'm touch starved more than I have ever been before and multiple friends have just stopped talking to me. My medication was messed up from the trip because of the time change, and i just don't know what to do right now. Each day it just goes slowly down  and down and down and i feel completely helpless.",4.741082706766914,6.219309484210527,4.359699248120304,87.97789473684212,69.94736842105263,7.954887218045112,29.360902255639097,8.418075326091056,1.9104586466165416,391,15,80,6,7,118,68,95,0.192,0.778,0.031,-0.937,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,4,0,9,2,0,1,1,17,14,6,0,0,4,1,2,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,3,8,1,1,2,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,4,2,10,1,15,10,2,18,0,2,0,0,5,8,0,0,8,56,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594793414567622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22811857635667665,0.186698199648738,0.0,0.1480086159459847,0.0,0.20660490232568587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568501877066729,0.0,0.2545711625356127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15658590258475694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21962648503224394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276696664270648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875866644440489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19418932647071974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801585812375937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343652079595938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21487034433580132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207087391264513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445954388487964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843644054017008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073498587013464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029916575105009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19515342909989636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157862253465947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19475950075805745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,10lizards,2020/02/26,"I love negative attention For some reason I enjoy when people disgust, fear or disapprove of me. No positive reaction I get from others makes me feel as good. In fact I barely feel anything at all from affection, social acceptance, kindness, love etc. Because of this I destroyed my longest friendship for fun, and I hardly care. Does anyone else have this? Any idea what causes it?",5.2931372549019615,7.874946352941179,5.835882352941179,73.40813725490199,70.76470588235293,8.650980392156864,31.92156862745098,9.2995712137729,3.5181686274509816,304,14,45,7,6,98,56,68,0.168,0.461,0.371,0.9648,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,1,11,2,1,0,0,1,2,0,4,2,14,8,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,9,8,9,8,3,3,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,2,1,32,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997649800314852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542084801425926,0.22597190691164495,0.18148772875204025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444069262265196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22485783002983767,0.2265579520202142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19299827335815534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842350026916192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24596324313432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481716853415189,0.22302588158314884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11522438079792227,0.0,0.0,0.1849806289444648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975628075104741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489656965381808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296611297783158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3980965272513664,0.0,0.14721386591930774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15289643657497265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267544746403625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22481535806079764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xcallistoxx,2020/02/26,"Need advice re: letting mental health issues prevent me from succeeding in jobs I'm new to reddit so I'm not too sure how this works but I would really appreciate advice about this because its really affecting my life. I've always had anxiety issues and what i consider a low level constant depression just in the background. Sometimes it get worse and I go into depressive episodes where I can't do much, but most of the time I can function relatively normally. I also have very low self esteem, revolving around feeling inadequate and incompetent. 

I'm a recent university graduate and am beginning my journey into the professional workforce, only I can't stomach doing work outside of my comfort zone as I am immediately overcome with anxiety and feel incapable of doing even the simplest things. Most people who know me would say I am a smart and hardworking person, but the truth is I feel like I can't do anything right and would rather not try, than try and prove I'm a failure. The more ""professional"" a job is, the worse I feel about it. I recently started a new job and have been a mess since. I know logically that having insecurities when you first start a job is normal, and it takes a few weeks/months to settle into a new position, but my negative thoughts feel impossible to overcome and I want to quit as soon as I start. Lately I find myself wishing I didn't have to deal with any of this and want to just disappear and fade from existence because I can't see how I can get through  life when I feel like its impossible for me to do anything well. This is a really disappointing thing for me as I used to have big aspirations and a strong desire to succeed, 

I've tried using strategies to change my thoughts by challenging negative ones and replacing them with compliments; I've also tried rationalizing my fears but neither work for me. When I try to push through and ignore the thoughts, I end up manifesting them physically by either crying randomly or feeling ill. If you have any experience with something like this, I'd love to hear some advice. Please don't just suggest therapy, as I have been to therapy before but can no longer afford to go even though I want to.",8.978075060532685,7.837627019370463,9.234928571428572,65.6326349878935,60.88861985472155,12.715205811138015,39.29406779661017,11.792908689023552,4.728212687651332,1761,77,306,46,20,587,210,413,0.183,0.675,0.142,-0.9775,5,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,2,2,9,23,23,0,2,20,0,35,6,1,5,3,78,70,38,0,13,15,0,7,3,0,3,4,2,0,2,15,24,0,2,15,0,0,5,12,9,1,2,7,10,42,14,47,59,8,37,0,5,1,1,12,13,0,6,22,217,57,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22489768834245688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269936568277075,0.0638337799264303,0.0,0.0,0.10433889446219954,0.0,0.117374917232433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262613091288869,0.06829342164642911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353060930043458,0.0,0.065279586176356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115525708281522,0.0,0.0,0.08290264127712521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426882116740668,0.0,0.07909073118498038,0.13215059599115164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794752281559159,0.0,0.0,0.10134026565139613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504287734436882,0.0,0.0863267232870424,0.2715290722458438,0.1096117180966449,0.0,0.0,0.07011694886378131,0.06525451101686618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016178979785428,0.0,0.08719883535023369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154542138481538,0.08646440235101391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014295027493686,0.3045147996161528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843221120149578,0.0,0.08653888422510142,0.0,0.0,0.07844721222420406,0.10837342726937807,0.112438550775663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923910095196459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731159014208347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123390478564308,0.0,0.05639501844236279,0.056883872726592184,0.0,0.2222781021054268,0.0,0.0,0.15033060040015953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05198468377784556,0.058345903968056764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05318515024636576,0.066985370627317,0.0,0.08421102816112977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815968098832776,0.0,0.0,0.14743852269335758,0.0,0.15149540550675006,0.0,0.0,0.06551496512126552,0.0,0.061007568129125785,0.0,0.0,0.061132645168171476,0.0,0.080031421766644,0.0,0.0,0.06346019075160565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059059652948959276,0.07587399330996275,0.0,0.16289974077117295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230383413403532,0.0,0.057680814397888976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754626502524823,0.0,0.10193327910376007,0.0,0.07537298878806878,0.182711581920518,0.044733662107939526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604253242976694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251582390346225,0.0,0.06329865733634116,0.1357470881706116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897681329968393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882195066165451,0.0,0.0,0.16755028119722826,0.0,0.1563601258249007,0.16349033701865304,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hamsterpopcorn,2020/02/26,"Friends who have been hospitalized, what can I expect? I have bipolar disorder and recently have been in a very bad spot mentally due to going off my meds (stupid of me, I know). I have felt suicidal and have self harmed. I talked to my therapist and she basically told me that my only options were to admit myself to a hospital or have her admit me. I begged her to let me wait until Saturday because I have two very important obligations Thursday and Friday. She agreed and told me that I needed to notify her Saturday that I was admitting myself or she would call a 5150 on me.

I am doing this alone as my family does not know the extent of my mental issues. What can I expect during hospitalization? How should I prepare?",5.74215027977618,6.564296388489209,7.072182254196644,71.86680255795365,67.12949640287768,10.782094324540367,29.83293365307754,10.746095033038511,3.401267945643484,574,20,102,16,9,196,84,139,0.11900000000000001,0.804,0.077,-0.8398,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,4,0,18,1,0,1,0,22,29,10,1,5,3,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,7,5,0,1,6,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,7,1,31,1,13,19,1,10,0,0,0,0,16,3,0,3,6,83,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18646966264977527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503279111925372,0.10975219607429618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18384345406210648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063442263834608,0.0,0.15755634641855387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16972798248312346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728689701210541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910033713510306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232226376359818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879175235781284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19789322534053916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841055860088952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19998655542180352,0.0,0.36288085209983306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349918277342487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369303833329025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17777018212426618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878235234333408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969371996522884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447112877736773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090431415031527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34407652059523003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758752958698233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971077256175009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789697874619102,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VioletHairDontCare,2020/02/26,"I feel like it's all breaking down but I'm just overreacting Big rant. I needed to get this off my chest, this was all just triggered by a midterm I just walked out of with a definite abysmal grade. 


Maybe I'm just being dramatic. I probably am. But I've dealt with my mental health totally on my own through middle school and high school and it was fine - nobody had to know I was struggling, if my parents asked I'd just say I'm fine. I kept the self harm low-key and when it started to draw attention, I moved it to somewhere nobody would see. I kept my struggle with my sexuality to myself because nobody wants to hear about it, even the queer kids hate people like us. I tried to enrich myself how I could - do better in school, develop your art skills, become more personable, because then I'm actually putting things out into the world so I'm not just a net negative, right? 

But coming to university has been hard. I've been doing okay with living on campus, cooking for myself, cleaning, but I picked a tough program and I'm not sure I can keep up. My grades were awful last semester, I failed a course and my little brother tried to kill himself so I've been dealing with the fallout but it's just so hard. I don't even know if it's maybe my mental health coming to bite me in the ass now or if I'm just a lazy good-for-nothing, but my old study methods aren't working and I don't understand how uni works and I'm weak if I admit I'm not doing well so why ask for help I'm a big girl I should be able to figure this out on my own but I'm just too stupid cocky idiotic to think I could do this I'm not cut out for this at all

I have friends here, I'm in a close club-like group that is full of wonderful and brilliant and amazing women and I just feel like I don't fit there, I've somehow tricked them into thinking I belong but I'm just a failure who can't even get first year right. I'm going to flunk out and it'll be my fault entirely because I'm just too lazy, I try and sit down and study but I just can't do it, but that's my fault I should be able to, everyone else can do it just fine. 

I'm trying to sign up for summer classes but it's just a series of phone calls and paperwork I don't understand and what's the point anyways if I'm not going to get into the specialised program I want next year. I could repeat first year but I'm so scared because that would mean this entire year meant nothing and I might just repeat all the same mistakes as last year. It's all just more hard work. Just more and more hard work that gets worse every year and what's going to be the point if I don't love being here and going through this every day why would I spend the next five years here but if I don't I'm just a flunkie failure. I don't want to be a failure. Academically or mental health wise. I probably don't even have it that bad, I'm sure I don't, this is all just a personal failing. After all I did fine hiding all this before, why can't I do it now, why can't I just keep up like I used to, I'm not even the worst off in this family and if my parents knew how I'm hurting, how I've been hurting myself, it would break their hearts they can never know.

I just want everything to be okay. I don't want to be a failure. Why am I so bad at this I deserve everything wrong",2.200363121297965,3.381512118980172,3.7065500901364916,91.35141668812777,75.8271954674221,6.607633273242339,23.176306979139838,7.056908132695986,0.5875856090651554,2580,73,591,26,55,855,268,706,0.204,0.6940000000000001,0.10300000000000001,-0.9979,2,0,1,0,0,1,54.0,1,1,3,10,50,42,6,3,25,3,62,10,3,7,12,146,127,56,1,24,51,3,6,4,1,8,4,2,1,6,35,36,1,4,16,2,1,9,23,24,1,3,14,9,68,18,63,93,18,74,0,5,1,3,28,37,2,13,29,374,103,17,0.12144413166728435,0.0,0.059255976990332825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353386935619696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140077721741382,0.14806243092139906,0.06706275102283522,0.051670005632954416,0.0,0.0,0.05370373270351718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06200401835010981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10461336603305267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14544488570609065,0.0,0.0,0.039160709051528464,0.06260178357752176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0507254943187036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005317589983928,0.0,0.10232191877213644,0.05802253609100879,0.1091461547797402,0.0,0.05724335954249162,0.0,0.06140580195885061,0.08675971192879284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330031635642864,0.0,0.0,0.04691371743547498,0.0,0.1268990927489378,0.0,0.13803899741526046,0.05093078788235885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175801758308452,0.05995046868260288,0.0,0.19363414946805285,0.06843818133983634,0.07195594037821401,0.040700720762076634,0.064156196425998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000845471710246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794512424667166,0.06717996912239578,0.0,0.10011377808887388,0.09899317624116984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866293670519595,0.060859462224381815,0.05361869661092318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05480403516259568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200695346053295,0.06614413097641983,0.0,0.0,0.18358068113401932,0.06441651602099997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453794626526256,0.0,0.045024642409143265,0.04683260056752239,0.0,0.12915721178179185,0.0,0.0,0.116528919701103,0.0,0.06371759354148697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348493362725023,0.0,0.0,0.04209703482793505,0.10604033145334543,0.0,0.0,0.1148039586379664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309373143148029,0.0,0.0,0.061042447709931565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371262488439892,0.0,0.048288623956175065,0.060793380949507834,0.1843619172600664,0.048387624757046964,0.0,0.06334635765496945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042979390731809584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269597747665922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445965686415302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0403410423838168,0.07781649587328388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490518719983344,0.0,0.0,0.12642762402298036,0.07304116868710257,0.05244436866564788,0.0,0.0,0.17907723841579545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054596429611387325,0.0,0.2739610985085047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585049016667567,0.1768255484928207,0.0,0.06188097271569644,0.1725408534681568,0.06639004667949759,0.0,0.2737211368201462
mentalhealth,SJCon17Error,2020/02/26,"Am I a pathological liar? Am I a pathological liar?

First of all I don’t know how long this is going to be but I can imagine it’s gonna be a long one.
I’ve been with my girlfriend for near enough two years, I love her so so much and I would do anything for her, I seen her a long time before I actually first messaged her because I was so scared of her not liking me, so when we first started talking I put on a front of a typical boy (sex obsessed etc) when in reality that is the complete opposite of what I am, I just thought that’s what you needed to be to get somebody to like you, I resent myself for this and I know that it was not the correct thing to do and lying is never ever right.

Since then we have been told each other everything about each other, like, really really personal shit that we’ve never told anyone, she has known me and loved me for about a year now, and things have been great, she has the occasional slip up of doubt which is completely okay because I know it’s my fault, in this time she has cheated on me twice but I have understood her reasons and forgiven her, she is the most amazing person on the planet and while I know what I’ve just written seems bad it makes sense.

I would like to clarify I have not cheated in any way and that is not what I’m suggesting, but for instance I have told her I haven’t liked a girls picture from a year or so before we got together and then it turned out I had, I also used to say I watched porn and masturbated when in reality I have never actually “watched” porn (nudity/sex) and I look away whenever there is nudity on my tv screen etc. I don’t know what I can do because I haven’t been following any girls on Instagram/twitter/snapchat for a while now and although I did this for my own reasons I don’t know how else I can ease her doubts. 

Right now we’re arguing because she went on my Instagram and seen that apparently I’ve voted on girls Instagram polls back in 2018, I have no memory of this and I’m certain that my votes have been bought because some of the accounts are in massive blocks in the same minute and also at time when I knew I’d been asleep. This has resulted in her calling me a freak and telling me that I need therapy because I’m a pathological liar, I really don’t want to lose her but obviously I’m too fucked up to be what she deserves, everything I do just hurts her and I feel like such a failure.

I don’t know what to do. Help.

tl:dr girlfriend thinks I’m a pathological liar, I don’t know what to do.",3.5571776078181427,4.2879238929254315,5.011971000637349,85.0047931272573,72.02103250478012,8.640939026981092,27.720894412577014,8.920646497554287,1.9268360314425323,1968,69,433,37,36,662,214,523,0.16399999999999998,0.733,0.10300000000000001,-0.988,1,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,3,2,0,4,26,31,10,4,21,1,56,12,2,7,8,78,99,40,0,5,12,0,1,6,2,3,4,1,0,6,32,24,0,1,18,1,2,5,16,19,0,6,22,8,76,12,50,70,11,58,0,2,6,6,44,23,2,6,35,311,108,0,0.0,0.0,0.15815078505029695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12960227563466886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020886770081667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056659350673804273,0.0,0.066682304739958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613208654266082,0.06230848762966462,0.06765820654792559,0.29637756656802905,0.0,0.1379042650117498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274257447432397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16992069727038514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769170939394119,0.0,0.0,0.0837275578982929,0.18074385575588647,0.0,0.07329794369482448,0.0,0.0,0.1456523960988208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040972135975496725,0.05788916683676777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20677693994959975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491263572051021,0.042335794969022914,0.0,0.04605226535278651,0.0,0.06480856949332417,0.08933789607179811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054313938167667566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674626687886733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3562638663255786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237528400713426,0.0,0.0,0.21513190085204276,0.06804634208756702,0.0906539083166712,0.0,0.0,0.1462688090739368,0.0,0.05408938629999931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05956773031317832,0.12016817383293815,0.18749026482785816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054909275840726565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14150776443257562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145938618388103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557332260924318,0.16662846665271025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840150714054172,0.0,0.06443977616733552,0.08112701377444988,0.0,0.0,0.07376834908108339,0.0,0.0,0.08317802526386647,0.06703038021306691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057354757532122526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513032822938483,0.07082540486011069,0.0,0.09266697767780258,0.0,0.10766791548789707,0.05192193487178006,0.0,0.06433023422721311,0.14175096279594068,0.0,0.0,0.2322882036414472,0.0,0.0,0.08813937935974281,0.07915633896753539,0.0,0.0,0.06998549764264733,0.0,0.0,0.047794682120788655,0.06431930748110262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751173328881239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512539669073805,0.0,0.0,0.1565455559024204
mentalhealth,Eigadyne,2020/02/26,"Becoming a failure Big rant. I needed to get this off my chest, this was all just triggered by a midterm I just walked out of with a definite abysmal grade. 

Maybe I'm just being dramatic. I probably am. But I've dealt with my mental health totally on my own through middle school and high school and it was fine - nobody had to know I was struggling, if my parents asked I'd just say I'm fine. I kept the self harm low-key and when it started to draw attention, I moved it to somewhere nobody would see. I kept my struggle with my sexuality to myself because nobody wants to hear about it, even the queer kids hate people like us. I tried to enrich myself how I could - do better in school, develop your art skills, become more personable, because then I'm actually putting things out into the world so I'm not just a net negative, right? 
But coming to university has been hard. I've been doing okay with living on campus, cooking for myself, cleaning, but I picked a tough program and I'm not sure I can keep up. My grades were awful last semester, I failed a course and my little brother tried to kill himself so I've been dealing with the fallout but it's just so hard. I don't even know if it's maybe my mental health coming to bite me in the ass now or if I'm just a lazy good-for-nothing, but my old study methods aren't working and I don't understand how uni works and I'm weak if I admit I'm not doing well so why ask for help I'm a big girl I should be able to figure this out on my own but I'm just too stupid cocky idiotic to think I could do this I'm not cut out for this at all
I have friends here, I'm in a close club-like group that is full of wonderful and brilliant and amazing women and I just feel like I don't fit there, I've somehow tricked them into thinking I belong but I'm just a failure who can't even get first year right. I'm going to flunk out and it'll be my fault entirely because I'm just too lazy, I try and sit down and study but I just can't do it, but that's my fault I should be able to, everyone else can do it just fine. 
I'm trying to sign up for summer classes but it's just a series of phone calls and paperwork I don't understand and what's the point anyways if I'm not going to get into the specialised program I want next year. I could repeat first year but I'm so scared because that would mean this entire year meant nothing and I might just repeat all the same mistakes as last year. It's all just more hard work. Just more and more hard work that gets worse every year and what's going to be the point if I don't love being here and going through this every day why would I spend the next five years here but if I don't I'm just a flunkie failure. I don't want to be a failure. Academically or mental health wise. I probably don't even have it that bad, I'm sure I don't, this is all just a personal failing. After all I did fine hiding all this before, why can't I do it now, why can't I just keep up like I used to, I'm not even the worst off in this family and if my parents knew how I'm hurting, how I've been hurting myself, it would break their hearts they can never know.

I just want everything to be okay. I don't want to be a failure. Why am I so bad at this I deserve everything wrong",2.2438409961685792,3.4123964683908063,3.7458620689655184,91.163122605364,75.69540229885058,6.649808429118775,23.377394636015325,7.093109894594671,0.6335279693486591,2546,73,581,26,54,844,267,696,0.2,0.708,0.092,-0.9979,2,0,1,0,0,1,54.0,1,1,3,10,49,41,6,3,26,3,62,10,3,7,11,142,125,55,1,24,49,3,5,3,1,8,4,2,1,6,34,36,1,4,15,2,1,9,23,24,1,3,14,8,67,17,62,91,17,72,0,5,1,3,28,36,2,13,28,369,101,17,0.12151351095199668,0.0,0.05928982907723136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359872962188795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145870602217394,0.14814701685740986,0.13420212601478165,0.05169952396358662,0.0,0.0,0.05373441287315731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062039440353489975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467313014357063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14552797627618916,0.0,0.0,0.03918308100104568,0.06263754707557387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05075447306361448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20064631990644494,0.0,0.10238037381181056,0.058055683530872065,0.10920850840723753,0.0,0.0572760618500059,0.0,0.030720441104907712,0.04340463825182697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335933034056252,0.0,0.0,0.04694051856710797,0.0,0.1269715883744134,0.0,0.13811785710795696,0.050959883908528264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21770447625408898,0.05998471752261075,0.0,0.19374476987104425,0.06847727908793813,0.07199704777143016,0.04072397249812168,0.0641928479377408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13008272667632345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800679174270954,0.06721834807196475,0.0,0.10017097164955313,0.09904972961814017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904804534993806,0.06089423035931873,0.053649328200667375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054835343919196165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207665427723614,0.06618191816656281,0.0,0.0,0.1836855581352315,0.06445331624958113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457481586519476,0.0,0.04505036433939948,0.04685935535825607,0.0,0.12923099743817426,0.0,0.0,0.11659549099595412,0.0,0.06375399448571381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492637375769054,0.0,0.0,0.04212108425811149,0.10610091076867248,0.0,0.0,0.11486954448738615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13101211691814482,0.0,0.0,0.06107732038184301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377187441446126,0.0,0.048316210552116975,0.06082811133316339,0.18446724057023453,0.048415267910721684,0.0,0.0633825465174768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04300394423921588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12703230505883126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452504601892426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04036408864078049,0.07786095131751479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16499939516012108,0.0,0.0,0.12649985030515776,0.07308289605563402,0.052474329378736764,0.0,0.0,0.17917954266499195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05462761976592408,0.0,0.2741176085414933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588810960404985,0.17692656638396842,0.0,0.06191632442487643,0.17263942357469822,0.06642797435774278,0.0,0.2738775097664755
mentalhealth,blickbeared,2020/02/26,"I feel like my mind is ""foggy"" and can barely remember anything and I'm running purely on autopilot and can't make it stop. I'm a senior in high school and I used to be able to pass all my classes with A's, especially science, but this whole senior year I feel like I haven't been learning anything and I've been running on autopilot for the past few months making it even worse. I'm certain it's not senioritis because I still give a damn about my classes, but I can't seem to learn anything.",4.0030672268907574,4.823416421568631,5.132072829131655,84.22147058823529,71.05882352941177,7.789355742296919,30.257703081232492,7.957251820313856,1.9796761904761904,393,16,80,5,7,130,64,102,0.08,0.825,0.095,-0.1546,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,4,0,8,0,0,3,3,23,18,7,0,0,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,6,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,2,2,9,3,9,15,3,15,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,10,47,13,8,0.19526640890417907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4820628502555095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903259047070586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289716214798477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974651268821425,0.2789967230744377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873173322888592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063096818770459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19079460820657732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606836884241083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19716340879721184,0.0,0.15585978463710873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18640388215375206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211987763769396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19762003058706573,0.0,0.1777632049729342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15594000638678054,0.16325146129489726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686474825254421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180079721760367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19899315274937446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12574516527359791
mentalhealth,smallwalnut,2020/02/26,"Animal Crossing burned me out I’m sure a lot of you watched the direct on February 20th, and it was AMAZING. I’m beside myself with excitement for it; and that’s the main problem. 
After watching the direct nothing feels fun anymore. I barely know what to do with myself; I feel like I’m walking through molasses until my spring break and I want to cry every day. This was brought on by watching the direct and I don’t know why. 
I started plotting out the days until Animal Crossing is here; I have the rest of this week, next week, then a week for spring break, and at the end of the next week it FINALLY comes out. I’m obsessing over which villagers I want in my town; usually I get little micro obsessions but never anything that has made me so depressed. 
What should I do until the game releases, or at least until my spring break?",4.3582113821138195,5.6970880731707325,5.065609756097562,83.08650406504066,70.70731707317074,7.66178861788618,28.910569105691057,8.07648339933343,1.9766520325203247,660,25,124,9,12,213,97,164,0.091,0.843,0.066,-0.7233,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,2,9,0,2,11,0,9,0,0,1,2,25,24,13,0,4,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,11,0,0,4,1,0,5,2,4,0,0,4,5,17,5,25,19,4,41,0,1,3,0,2,11,0,2,23,87,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638320891767677,0.0,0.0,0.13594393066296478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14230350426762026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146231590451284,0.2130781692227173,0.0,0.14228485022400594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14631645108215793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391864936270316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16705820933717175,0.11801752973722,0.0,0.18096640399922664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863091700005624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18157707104738985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070742946222098,0.16557185894651538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044548624502776,0.0,0.1563144022238989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741093088656644,0.0,0.3513800298171674,0.0,0.0,0.15851199756585446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580722365042782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692803977823238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556972200272395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18194232819252326,0.0,0.19487619624501384,0.0,0.5300476885241275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14906555760169074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,szymont,2020/02/26,"I can barely get out of bed in the morning, is there something wrong with me Hi, im an almost 18 years old male. Since i can remember i had trouble waking up to go to school or to do any other productive activities. I've been skipping school only to lay in bed all day regretting it like crazy, skipping important exams to which i studied for the night before, overall literally disappointing everyone around me that care.
The thing is, i get literally no support from any of my friends or family, I've tried explaining but the usual answers are ""go to sleep earlier"" or ""just get up it's not that hard"". I don't blame them, most of them just think im lazy and i dont care about good grades or school overall and I don't blame you if you think the same. The routine is, i usually wake up, my bell ringing, but i cant seem to get up. I'm like a totally different person in the morning that has no motivation and self control. I've tried it all, putting my phone away from my reach, asking my family to get me out of bed, but none of that seems to be working.
I'm on the brink of just accepting the fact that I'm just a lazy disappointment and will end up letting down everyone that expects anything from me. My parents have literally no things left to take away from me because it's obvious for them that the reason I'm not going to school is that I stay up too late, and trust me, I tried going to sleep at a lot different times of the day and the more I sleep the harder it gets to wake up. I'm searching for help here, im too ashamed to talk about it to anyone because I've never been taken seriously. Has anyone had any similar issues and knows how to resolve them or at least make it any better? Thank you",6.3682905982905975,5.212952566951572,7.210441595441598,78.09891025641028,66.06552706552708,10.64900284900285,33.46011396011396,9.861636050157227,2.9377361823361814,1345,49,283,25,18,452,170,351,0.094,0.772,0.134,0.9297,3,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,3,4,5,12,19,0,1,17,0,22,6,6,5,6,53,51,17,0,3,15,1,1,2,1,1,0,1,3,3,19,11,0,1,12,0,0,5,11,7,0,0,5,2,32,12,52,43,9,38,0,3,0,0,18,21,0,11,13,182,51,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648767706317914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349398719533834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207846598007175,0.0,0.07107564238701515,0.07688814329292751,0.08074484937113527,0.0,0.16229603875826862,0.0,0.0,0.10530142899265103,0.0,0.07349501687023924,0.0,0.0,0.07638777454520926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761211606428384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687196919597137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140378009004867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18047778242264548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122569686775428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764987131219224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16506161424309973,0.0,0.0,0.16284502483589286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672970927966829,0.0,0.2707504338780144,0.0,0.1963456035955031,0.0724435592521245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737109033291217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05789239080577744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798851992987211,0.09014846387284016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04746702153052364,0.0,0.09742979587635836,0.0,0.09384190676387323,0.08831978760198311,0.0,0.08439262225915348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342919324563503,0.0,0.0,0.057653044425865024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661432927330663,0.0,0.0,0.08105295473082964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063141284575216,0.0,0.0,0.06568873131114969,0.0,0.0,0.09590432711281903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541547415778525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682630607999793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880335910321277,0.0,0.0,0.0978410498830988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3496466225946873,0.0,0.1572570959931366,0.09010336978850422,0.0,0.0,0.07144665067694841,0.0,0.25929891955962303,0.0,0.0,0.06649230554415464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205956482709496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801233036219732,0.0,0.0,0.06493994027182465,0.06942141450918887,0.0,0.07951844180631122,0.0,0.0,0.11476157411799087,0.11068558261085852,0.0,0.0,0.05036338990275936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591989830622262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19025002132288216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287882355716555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443268954500893,0.0,0.05561983293762565
mentalhealth,Ticklemepickle03,2020/02/26,"I can’t care about anything. What is my problem? If I had the chance, I wouldn’t leave my room for the rest of my life. I feel like I do everything just because I have to and people think I’m irresponsible and lazy. I’m not actually not lazy because there’s lots of things I do own my own which require lots of time like reading philosophy or writing music, but I just cannot have long term goals in life. What could be the problem? (I’ve struggled with anxiety in the past)",2.669897959183672,4.223339204081636,3.997704081632652,88.2196173469388,75.3265306122449,6.940816326530613,26.535714285714285,7.645422480735847,1.2771795918367346,374,14,82,5,8,123,63,98,0.183,0.743,0.07400000000000001,-0.8541,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,4,6,0,1,4,0,11,2,0,0,0,20,16,5,0,5,7,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,4,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,1,12,3,9,12,6,7,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,4,6,55,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.2033151400125413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15938372642472046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17145058268603328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25401094878827674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124221083443324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634691724159292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872474885064649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053457377378394,0.14884205673571144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22060778682417964,0.0,0.0,0.29432115635757033,0.20357416091926234,0.0,0.0,0.18437919874583256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35425576316505986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19888934104708605,0.1444405267598705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3987169846123369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084018671184849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21780793848729876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384154830803931,0.13349937472420018,0.0,0.0,0.12148792828145412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emori98,2020/02/26,"Alternatives to self-harm (I’m sorry if this is against the rules, please tell me if it is or if I should post a trigger warning, I’m new to this sub)

What are some alternatives to self-harm or techniques that can help? I’ve heard of doodling on areas you are tempted to hurt, snapping rubber bands (this hurts though) and recently I’ve tried boxing to relieve anger but I started going overboard and bled and bruised my hands.

I need help. What to do?",3.025421348314609,5.1251349550561835,3.4656039325842727,90.0307654494382,75.85393258426966,5.798314606741574,26.85533707865169,6.6274283507984215,1.0321786516853928,357,14,72,3,8,111,62,89,0.111,0.79,0.099,0.1803,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,2,0,7,1,1,1,0,13,13,10,0,5,6,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,2,6,1,9,11,1,7,0,2,0,0,6,2,0,6,3,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128432277750404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029454789696277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4838424584002899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16756474584085693,0.0,0.2182573718465788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480632709140496,0.0,0.0,0.21643081554485147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22313256730785988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4715025262807392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25297130091537945,0.15995309010845274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975205345295388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22202875971969946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534287353682995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PatrickT312,2020/02/26,Comparing yourself to other people What’s some advice to stop comparing yourself to other people and is it that common to do it constantly?,6.4860000000000015,8.8795282,7.693000000000001,62.17150000000001,67.0,9.8,32.5,10.125756701596842,4.2998,115,5,14,3,2,39,17,25,0.087,0.9129999999999999,0.0,-0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,14,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4486398770453037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4961380136464331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6365822461678275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3838389975024291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,killerwhale35,2020/02/26,"Need advice! Ok so some for some context I have always been scared of dying, its an irrational fear of mine and I havent been doing too well for a couple of years now. But recently my mind is flooded with suicidal thoughts, I dont want to die but the thoughts are so overwhelming it scares me. I dont know what to do or what this even means. Any advice would be massively appreciated.",2.6653246753246758,4.723400467532471,3.8714285714285737,86.89857142857143,76.79220779220779,7.5168831168831165,23.98701298701299,8.418075326091056,1.4809532467532471,304,10,63,6,7,99,58,77,0.163,0.7190000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.40700000000000003,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,4,3,1,12,0,0,0,0,15,18,6,3,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,4,0,7,2,8,12,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,47,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34800238953748674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816275866149567,0.0,0.0,0.12108901005883642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19702342685166574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36960275836048745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4173772403745692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760899432639413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20037048539436292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785881978709927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19396291050317807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797929649991029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203152807549284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758158237714535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3565444411840165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19477212417944592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28272441381297625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502622637942556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010010614973186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649091319726,0.0,0.0,0.11466679459825872
mentalhealth,neatodalton,2020/02/26,"how to start getting help i fear i have schizophrenia or some kind of mental illness, and don’t know where to start looking for help. i’m only 19 and have a history of anxiety/hypochondria, but it’s eating me up inside. i can’t stop thinking about it and it’s making me depressed, anxious and unhappy. do i call a hospital? do i google psychologists near me? where do i start",1.034399999999998,3.616833306666667,2.9110000000000014,87.5505,89.26666666666668,5.666666666666668,24.83333333333333,7.1686216300943375,1.4319333333333342,298,13,57,5,10,99,49,75,0.239,0.7120000000000001,0.05,-0.9332,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,7,2,0,2,0,12,16,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,1,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,9,1,8,16,1,8,0,1,1,0,3,4,0,2,4,39,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724481261528813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462567190416082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20771530588010192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467722926939374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27137799264099505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259989072533023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232960128778461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251136531958247,0.13253813316752594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20251809968116247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609796998683581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24303788377186256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341706594175985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5120940882376209,0.0,0.0,0.20162497623992515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452897627429169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unique0username,2020/02/26,"I'm not sure what to do (long post and rant) So, I've been in this whole rut for months now and it's getting to the point where I feel myself about to break...

I graduated college in May of 2019 and moved into my boyfriends parents house with him. We figured this would be our best options due to me having so much debt (50k$)and we hadn't found jobs yet. Well, I have a job now but I get paid 9.65 an hour and I get roughly 1,000-1,200$ a month. I'm determined to pay my loans off sooner and so my payments are around 400$ monthly but I pay more each month to speed the process up a bit, so around 700-800$. That leaves me with a few hundred left for the entire month and I have other small bills to pay for. Basically, I'm left with around 100$ in spare money. I'm in the process of looking for better work but I live around 45-60mins away from anything within my field and the kicker? I don't have a car because I can't afford one. I'm about to get my license but what's that good for if I can't afford a car?
I'm getting annoyed with my boyfriends parent. His mom works and his dad doesn't. So on my off days, I'm stuck at home (which is fine cause laundry and other stuff need to be done) with his dad and no privacy. I want to blare music, walk around in my underwear and be weird but he's like in his 60s and sits around. His mom is getting on my nerves how she seems to do things that she knows I do not like. I'm trying to use products that can be used over and over again like tubberware and containers for beans/grains. She's a ""germaphobe"" and always puts leftovers in plastic bags which she knows I hate. She rarely hand washed dishes anyways, so why does it matter if leftovers in reusable containers get gross, you ain't washing them?
Our ideals are also very different. But I won't get into that. Too much political crap that I literally can't do anything about.


So basically, all of this is causing my mental health to deteriorate. I don't zero independence. My job is terrible. My housing is crappy (I am grateful to have a roof over my head though). My location sucks - middle of bumfuck nowhere. My finances suck. Just everything sucks right now. I want to move so badly but my boyfriend and I can't afford it right now. I'm just so annoyed and angry all the time and I feel bad cause I know it's hard on my boyfriend. He's trying to help but I keep getting short with him and pushing him away...

What do I do???",1.2165185808227577,3.3740231212723693,2.4691799204771385,94.58859630677479,82.20079522862824,5.30064230004588,21.40269918947851,6.490185161304077,0.2061953203853797,1902,59,423,18,52,609,243,503,0.142,0.774,0.085,-0.9853,10,0,0,0,0,0,70.0,4,1,1,5,34,22,7,0,15,0,38,7,3,7,3,79,76,41,0,7,14,6,5,3,0,3,3,0,1,0,22,36,1,3,8,0,9,7,13,12,1,2,6,6,63,10,65,63,10,65,0,0,1,0,28,38,4,5,20,270,85,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06074742864880901,0.06320713998620299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502183405320227,0.40573801524374414,0.0,0.0,0.14273911387704344,0.0,0.1268515403653003,0.046306221579396505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797182785417416,0.06718292900458751,0.08293171014233029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23410418056090884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048989725732897504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936496458755922,0.0,0.0,0.06647556358288112,0.07773632443395284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827047207475365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681815445206548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328929612188257,0.0,0.0,0.3571868787672785,0.0,0.0,0.06371399778369832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804775371178247,0.07499754446363235,0.0779597543995886,0.08074491077677548,0.0,0.0,0.05091626774790374,0.0,0.07619688821622331,0.0,0.07480806253448782,0.17530175871507178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22614409160861054,0.0675192324031935,0.0,0.0,0.12524151501456707,0.0,0.0,0.08043364356971533,0.16506762233375769,0.0,0.0,0.11133477019399428,0.0,0.0670765495504235,0.06722469304953169,0.06378962546042165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655264197574664,0.0,0.0,0.17793344099143604,0.30316393578358536,0.1614728825639732,0.1116828058535515,0.05632545825315239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05147436339304571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686954133174795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718094051785991,0.0,0.07275137025090668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636360126777544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297436428293495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06915368577285705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695923912145218,0.0,0.0,0.07159404583147552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050466313047650056,0.0,0.07463307137689018,0.0,0.044294523153897085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031475181185036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121494985110718,0.0,0.06267727055812704,0.0896096624139353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829968551228045,0.0,0.06854461730892035,0.08480976029957857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060365520749356,0.0,0.0,0.05396179802313325,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rainafterthedrought,2020/02/26,I thought I was going crazy until I took Ativan. Last night I read a book that reminded me of the tucked up doings in my past and I felt as if I was going crazy. I stayed up all night reading. I could not calm down and stop thinking about it until I took a Benzo. I wish it wasn’t this way.,0.3147395833333313,1.912994328125002,2.3981250000000003,96.86770833333335,82.28125,4.891666666666667,16.916666666666664,5.46131890053228,-0.7376270833333338,223,4,54,1,6,75,44,64,0.155,0.7979999999999999,0.047,-0.6442,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,0,1,11,13,6,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,3,3,0,4,2,0,0,0,7,1,12,1,9,5,1,17,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,7,38,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17132591366037608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20603194687177492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439032892575071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17491260985209228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4027405126649231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048423778284613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4292792542797448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287153901871977,0.0,0.17939979108393614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749519814962755,0.0,0.1703537883155813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4768160135520215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032485304717684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467582021483053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExistingObligation0,2020/02/26,"I feel so helpless and I don't know what to do This isn't really so much about my mental health, but some of my closest friends around me. They're going through some pretty heavy shit and I just don't know what to do, if I should help them, or what.  

Friend number 1 told me late last night she's going through a lot of stuff, she really needs to talk to someone about it, but she doesn't trust anyone. We're best friends and she normally tells me everything but she said she can't tell me. She just can't bring herself. She doesn't want me to help her because she feels like she's using me, and she thinks she can get through it on her own, but I can see she's really struggling and it destroys me to see. I see her walking off in school all the time because she just wants to be alone or somethings gotten to her or somethings on her mind and I just want to chase after her and hug her and let her know everything going to be okay and she can work through this but she tells me not to follow her, if she wants me to come with her she'll tell me.  

Friend number 2, told me this morning that she lost her best friend last month to suicide. She said I'm the 3rd person besides family that she's told, she was the first person there, and went in to depth about it and I just wanted to cry. I just couldn't imagine what it would be like for anyone to go through something as horrible as that. And so obviously she's been struggling so so much over the last month and I had no idea and I feel awful that I've not been there more, and that I've just been a spectator on the sideline.   

Friend number 3. This came just after friend number 2 told me the whole dead with her best friend simply because she thought the same had happened to Friend 3 two nights ago. He's been going through alot, he's been pushing people away and whenever me and his friends have tried to talk with him, he clams up, and pushes you away further so it's hard to understand really what's going on. Anyway at the weekend he told her that he just wanted it to all go away and he wanted the pain to end and he felt the only way that was going to happen was if he was to just go to sleep and never wake up. Then he didn't respond to her for half and hour and she was fucking terrified, but he said he was just with friends and he was drinking and taking pills and he's on antis as it is so he's just doing more damage. She showed me their chat which lasted for hours and she sort of talked him down from the whole going to sleep and not waking up thing but again the same as the other two, I just feel so helpless.   

I know people are going to say just being there is enough for them, and just letting them know I'm there, but I just feel like I should be doing more and I won't be able to live with myself if anything happens to any of those 3 friends.",3.7496804600683187,4.196171283305231,4.209477234401351,91.96469537769708,71.4114671163575,7.02640204090457,23.805465473256373,6.551861593081955,0.4603665758637092,2213,51,504,14,39,697,222,593,0.12,0.73,0.15,0.9653,1,1,4,0,0,1,37.0,0,1,4,6,36,31,3,2,16,2,47,11,5,1,4,114,107,58,2,17,34,0,7,3,12,5,3,4,0,2,29,38,1,0,16,4,0,19,15,10,0,4,29,14,83,21,76,64,20,62,0,4,3,2,98,21,2,12,24,354,112,2,0.053235511252564566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719006867845128,0.0,0.0,0.05513593466749213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03620197317521031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744470145101653,0.0,0.04380828980133457,0.04739089159858892,0.0,0.0,0.1500495456829618,0.0,0.0,0.0973556206362366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676021540685761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060887242770916436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04585767914977397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058476709363913665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05215053405670972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715086183289394,0.0550065138730648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568928973644727,0.0,0.05018570216974659,0.0,0.13458737018718234,0.07606291975158046,0.05111443924544781,0.0,0.0,0.04528209867605788,0.0,0.0,0.4935554872480322,0.04921537232739605,0.02781335741476661,0.0,0.3328046464343775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122796036300111,0.0,0.04768856156224738,0.0,0.0,0.056586859056740574,0.0,0.0,0.07136528207235586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485251021329932,0.0,0.0,0.0600964123554449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462842237775724,0.17357618767950955,0.06005197546854876,0.0,0.0,0.10887383414396963,0.0,0.07802454530538956,0.0,0.04700793175579341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05811284916319182,0.04525892794703264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05364887421670997,0.0,0.053752690626725205,0.0,0.08498415437078807,0.0,0.0782684522541325,0.03947345704906285,0.04105850814314525,0.0,0.0,0.0999158420761972,0.05215949805823837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040488005191586934,0.05664633735534881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381360105309569,0.09296639007269504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05415965345562308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641612672626222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519174860318019,0.04233501526500395,0.0,0.0538771794958981,0.12726543013025174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0546454872859046,0.0,0.0,0.10654791460425048,0.0,0.04510627592853428,0.12294989224196053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130663005976624,0.06094192389970862,0.058231008837192816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04002647922080813,0.12836606225845618,0.18612073313952665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035367308181633535,0.034111166054912115,0.0,0.0422630494702253,0.03104205472001144,0.0,0.0,0.2543440617977044,0.0,0.036143417669756005,0.0,0.10400671814285724,0.05542004466506037,0.0,0.04597838923798486,0.0,0.0,0.2197977867490914,0.042255870923202064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049349852274891914,0.0,0.11887109432755895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03875608622374595,0.0,0.0,0.03781697979238617,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sylveon-sakura,2020/02/26,"i am drawn to toxic people and idk why ok so idk if this is the right subreddit for this but basically whenever someone (usually in the cosplay community, dont make fun of me lol its just the community im most active in) gets in drama and is shown to be a bad person, my brains first thought is that i HAVE to be friends with them. not even so i can teach them to be a better person or anything, just so i can be treated like shit by them and be scared to say anything to them for fear that theyll do something horrible to me. and i dont know why but theres a part of me that really enjoys it. i know its terrible for my self esteem to be associating with these kinds of people that think theyre better than everyone, but i cant stop doing it. the first time i remember feeling this way was when i was about 10 or 11 and i was on an online game, and there was this girl that was infamous in the community for being incredibly rude and manipulative, and while most people avoided her, i became her friend and, sure enough, she treated me terribly and constantly made me feel like i was nothing. but that part of my brain kept telling me that this was what i wanted, so here we are now. theres still a part of my brain that hates these people and hates that im like this, but it gets overpowered by the other part of my brain. btw, this isnt sexual or anything. i just want to know if this is normal",6.037218390804597,4.890601158620693,7.005172413793105,79.27373563218393,66.72413793103448,10.491954022988507,30.367816091954023,9.725611199111238,2.4282574712643683,1096,32,239,20,15,370,141,290,0.159,0.696,0.145,-0.8248,1,1,1,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,5,4,16,24,4,3,11,2,30,5,5,3,1,48,46,27,0,5,14,0,2,3,2,1,0,1,0,4,26,14,0,3,8,2,0,0,5,10,0,2,10,3,34,14,30,28,7,17,0,0,0,0,18,6,1,7,13,177,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23149929482289255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829576959938099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586756818898335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4187226124664681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133430490052824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198003578144901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689162507847418,0.0,0.06193557418690247,0.0,0.0,0.08960324056713888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551965973424814,0.09482796195786412,0.06699079239916186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952496599990829,0.0,0.0,0.14489615216667645,0.0,0.0979840825769828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18516102981277316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20257987466433452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764919086172877,0.15460404778088632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743690443815088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872940902674893,0.06259359128174387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187672830535352,0.0899768394183027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4061840967154234,0.0,0.26003901194075546,0.1637563258891337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06007279535983698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622548640660986,0.08008084361212778,0.0,0.07457132142956686,0.09388221034606904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782472994815904,0.0,0.09625569216319782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945277873887995,0.07219032816148115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488650389484039,0.0783976573771327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883790752712388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196093073767892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060085362253806285,0.0,0.07444455675543649,0.05467925370688916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327669765419216,0.0,0.11061840419178703,0.07443191205142217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692294330409258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheBakersMan37,2020/02/26,"Nothing has helped Everyday I have very specific suicidal thoughts, and in the same day I imagine someone invading my home and killing me all while having constant Deja vu throughout the whole day. I went to my university’s counseling and it pretty much did nothing. I went to the school’s psychiatrist and it was no help. I started using CBD and it has done a little to curb my paranoia but not a lot. Everywhere I go I feel like people are watching me for a specific reason, when I know people are actually staring at me usually wondering why I look so tired and stressed. I don’t think I would go as far to kill myself but I am torn between not wanting to be alive anymore and being afraid to die all the time, especially when I have these feelings that someone is going to end my life for me. This has been effecting my relationships, school, and my weight and skin. I feel like a walking ghost or a man with a death wish.",5.949537920642892,6.310302386740338,6.66926167754897,76.55463083877451,66.56906077348066,9.896735308890005,35.23907584128578,9.800150414767053,3.404929281767956,736,34,139,15,11,243,116,181,0.20199999999999999,0.711,0.08800000000000001,-0.9766,0,0,0,0,0,3,13.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,2,2,10,0,18,4,1,3,2,34,35,17,6,3,5,0,5,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,6,10,1,1,10,0,0,6,4,4,0,0,7,8,25,2,14,25,6,21,0,0,3,0,4,4,0,3,13,98,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.1240787444441832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609729845224885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740252409326473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16400072557913692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196022819411046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13011721764409054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261596731928306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928705388627385,0.18167004699323205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21678452985106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17045012458255993,0.0,0.12754046657115176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813422930100623,0.0,0.06987757476266969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980885422982966,0.12423681918907804,0.12743635399989173,0.0,0.0,0.10677284576942853,0.0,0.0,0.10809723836337322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346889026568256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440051245853013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17629773371639398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935589141929785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307299924205398,0.0,0.13651006984993716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25736245105629746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21546528306800228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999647140825827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456483530430401,0.0,0.0,0.13907998991448545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147172315273976,0.0,0.1009418282707138,0.07414140238330492,0.14613867292512986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981561266407032,0.14003627845113867,0.10491095525719683,0.07499557016767618,0.0,0.0,0.15483280596866558,0.0,0.2357361513644074,0.1147318831146101,0.14195693094055753,0.14621467659704585,0.0,0.1378872909689453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090322755403853,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,littlecrabapple88,2020/02/26,Any other moms out there (or anyone!) taking Wellbutrin? I’m scared to start my doses. I have PPD (my son is 6 months) and PTSD from 2015. I have tried other anti depressants and SSRIs and they always make me so much worse. My new doctor said this should work better. What have your experiences with this medicine been? Any crazy side effects? He said I’ll be nauseated but that’s no big deal to me. I’m just skeptical.,1.509999999999998,4.110395121951221,2.573853658536585,91.21443902439024,85.58536585365854,5.231219512195122,16.736585365853657,6.742157984588678,-0.08481365853658529,328,7,66,4,10,104,65,82,0.187,0.79,0.023,-0.8984,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,3,3,4,1,1,0,0,7,2,0,2,0,11,14,6,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,2,9,1,5,9,1,6,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,1,3,37,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317842549425492,0.0,0.0,0.2994125434436851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15393062871460486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19470052209036728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269600143740736,0.18961072123322292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22532792041406885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21534422890737134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14694861732320294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578313745148157,0.17571778262898932,0.0,0.16183203776899033,0.0,0.0,0.21261758697067049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25733793504865776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4188169584588588,0.0,0.2204037301439303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558198917160403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655217781997093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494641267324541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026831319405185,0.0,0.2243467462815076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fairsnowe,2020/02/26,"Need advice on how to fake enthusiasm/passion. I need to fake enthusiasm for college/job applications.

I like teenagers and I absolutely *need* adequate yearly time off, so I’m going to be a high school teacher. 

The only thing I actually want to do is be a freelance novel writer and part time sub teacher, but until I sell a book ofc I need a full time job.

I’m convinced being a hs teacher is the best possible full time job for me, but the problem is that I really, really don’t want any full time job.

I’m bad at faking enthusiasm, so does anyone have any suggestions? I’d also appreciate help brainstorming socially acceptable reasons to become a teacher, because maybe one of you can help me find a reason I could *actually* be enthusiastic about other than “I want to be a teacher so that I’d get summers off.”

(The reason I like subbing is that I get to meet new students and teach a new class every day, which doesn’t apply to a full time position.)",4.8038050185109,5.913274695187166,6.74192513368984,72.34691484985602,69.42780748663101,9.604113533525302,31.496914849856022,9.851270322608157,3.2164713286713287,756,32,137,18,13,265,100,187,0.081,0.682,0.237,0.9795,4,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,1,6,10,0,0,14,0,15,0,0,4,0,20,28,11,0,9,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,5,2,1,1,2,5,0,1,0,0,14,5,18,22,6,22,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,0,14,84,20,8,0.0,0.0,0.2143361813317611,0.0,0.0,0.10731444485307837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782269668344307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493621915590103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678841971159442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169478117118396,0.06694501055895108,0.12128712320600304,0.0,0.0,0.11524889780885995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768201673440115,0.0,0.0,0.07082455865775439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610387447263187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925277518406974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003731274105035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475241965342005,0.0,0.06241301106569939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14721952971962687,0.1160304398741258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4359160413502298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10730462145258993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032855177174276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3257193758320185,0.0,0.21212891342944568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441660501179763,0.08352275659119343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189239279916032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380510145989658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508252841949124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407064992922712,0.33873852632616025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114330102365702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194725514720114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295926431945116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38422016123561975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943233411799495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072022362690451
mentalhealth,Skeyahaya,2020/02/26,"Willing to help with that extra push Life treating you like shit? Drop a PM, we'll work something out",2.6454999999999984,5.05386455,2.4700000000000024,95.165,78.5,4.0,25.0,3.1291,0.12650000000000006,81,3,16,0,2,24,20,20,0.22899999999999998,0.562,0.209,-0.128,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,1,1,0,1,1,3,1,0,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,1,9,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3654932764870166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3851511692396127,0.2663988789503484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5597275765856315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4197873032406119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39697422966446144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Slayadeth,2020/02/26,"Depersonalization So ever since around a year ago I’ve been experiencing some depersonalization, it feels like I’m really immersed in a video game of my life, but it doesn’t seem “real”. It’s very strange, I did go through a bit of stress in the past couple days but I don’t have any mental disorders other then ADHD, and I have no previous trauma. Is this a serious thing? What are some good grounding techniques? Should I see a psychiatrist?",5.419285714285714,6.86519092857143,6.58666666666667,72.775,68.28571428571428,9.40952380952381,28.285714285714285,9.725611199111238,2.5922285714285715,354,12,66,8,6,119,66,84,0.17800000000000002,0.755,0.067,-0.8492,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,6,0,9,1,0,0,1,11,14,5,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,2,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,3,5,2,6,11,3,11,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,3,7,42,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713987482440584,0.0,0.20018096182313616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15356929991962898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20103285558881825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465433045325256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498719719871768,0.0,0.1456389702998023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588159516925555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042723808635803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114184318725602,0.16133000927269586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283420163455323,0.1894119816366012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950745349020998,0.1103270876157746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22757930942222795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21557629569941444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25703922008312124,0.14466980140632746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17995393892375108,0.20558334299127973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18680545000447288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586827111666011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500286388039863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186329949978837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14542442259562807
mentalhealth,RennlesUrbex,2020/02/26,"IOP Experiences? Tomorrow I begin an IOP for co-occurring substance abuse and mental health issues, anxiety in particular. Tomorrow is the assessment, and Friday I meet with the psychiatrist. I want to be excited that this is the first step towards getting my life back together, but at the same time, I'm pretty scared. I've almost thought about backing out a couple times just out of fear of what they will expect from me. I'm 100% ready for change but it's intimidating, you know? I'd love to hear others' experiences, maybe it would help me get an idea of what to expect?",5.293888888888887,6.942469314814815,6.282407407407407,74.06583333333336,68.81481481481481,9.844444444444443,29.24074074074073,10.125756701596842,3.090996296296296,458,17,82,12,8,152,81,108,0.139,0.696,0.16399999999999998,0.6242,0,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,0,1,1,1,4,4,0,2,7,0,5,3,0,0,0,17,15,4,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,1,1,8,2,16,11,1,14,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,8,52,15,0,0.0,0.2225537542759918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18808961495835594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14369325718145015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888670338536605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987045188630025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078358494818022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36747733598063176,0.0,0.21136659080836803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977235093982028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19627206475022888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996598163100594,0.21170369099321554,0.0,0.12590183787365422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21204284619774144,0.0,0.19605093389828745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322920103836583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267341203245533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952841671276386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887054993920304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892934958734708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19109571799211011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880555982494526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491200047959365,0.21905619243045849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078994679079417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343259132262508,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brugernavnertaget,2020/02/26,"Thinking something bad will happen if i don’t do something... I am diagnosed with depression and anxiety. Possibly also a personality disorder, but never had that examined thoroughly. 

I stopped taking my anti depressants about 6 months ago because they left me feeling empty. I’ve been coping pretty well, but in the beginning of this month I started a new job and things have been going down hill. I’m starting to feel paranoid - thinking that my new co-workers don’t like me. Sometimes I feel like they’re talking about me behind my back. I’ve also been having a lot of obsessive thoughts. Like ‘I have to do this or something terrible will happen’. When I get home from work it gets really bad! I can’t even browse Reddit to relax because I start getting these thoughts like ‘I have to read all the replies to this thread or....’. 
I am also picking the skin around my fingers and biting the inside of my cheek. That is also getting increasingly worse. Could it all be OCD? 

I was seeing a psychiatrist the last few months, but with my new job I just don’t have the time. 

Shit, I feel like I’m sounding completely crazy when typing this out. 
Any tips on how to cope with these feelings and thoughts?",4.957924332728688,6.590714458149782,5.420290230629702,79.98484840632291,69.61674008810573,8.160559730500129,30.974086550919928,8.671277953709913,2.5580522933402428,950,40,170,16,17,304,131,227,0.184,0.701,0.115,-0.9463,2,0,3,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,1,14,14,1,1,10,0,23,5,4,2,3,34,48,16,0,2,6,0,7,5,0,2,1,1,1,1,12,9,0,1,11,2,0,2,5,7,1,0,8,9,22,7,21,36,5,26,0,2,1,0,3,6,1,3,23,113,34,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883678074760294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188833109607294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779157321422137,0.0,0.07626140123574314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874386713520087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665427454496053,0.1664714050120895,0.1215383233806114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452145666615448,0.0,0.0,0.07959312587713785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717230539888987,0.10118169138674832,0.0,0.0,0.11425161505168532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584328954093117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520274106495822,0.14243491558514354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083324294386895,0.0,0.056655250770189035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17630835697835182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999956563584122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19785083443136564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125940248043223,0.0,0.0,0.10831180659207187,0.0,0.0,0.2435137374960649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475156623836731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23871113993674614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688588816365162,0.2888392159120938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704412061426757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238376341842556,0.0,0.10141900538747088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971543998318634,0.0,0.0638629819830959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943879819808759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232877457369932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302351471634412,0.0985944388051982,0.0,0.21168002133791933,0.0,0.0,0.0833440187126717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495331769548393,0.0801258103225371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622858512107087,0.12775268352596386,0.0,0.23742451262675365,0.05812914437250966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963190022265888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451487765055219,0.0,0.10159106028753076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MCgoodFortniteBad11,2020/02/26,I can't laugh anymore. During the four last years I have lost my ability to laugh naturally. I still know what makes thinks funny but I never laugh. Is there any way to laugh more? I fee like I have lost my self.,-0.100833333333334,2.214008159090909,1.4836363636363683,97.48712121212124,92.4090909090909,4.751515151515153,14.151515151515152,6.42735559955562,-0.7090939393939388,165,3,38,2,6,53,32,44,0.316,0.5429999999999999,0.141,-0.8413,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,2,7,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,1,5,9,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,8,5,2,7,1,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,22,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993263490953443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906885434998961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16108680106860207,0.23892556638139606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319981657976974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6399331883467243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19565467136918427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22606620053181845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30577995283310444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23407978372069416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18781446415099085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232658823269156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18875464849065168
mentalhealth,peeledraspberry,2020/02/26,"URGENT: need medical term Hi, my gf‘s mum is having a strong attack of depression/something else

She has been dealing with mental health issues on/off for a long time and has been diagnosed with depression in the past. 

Today she has come home from work and she is unable to speak, can barely walk and wasn’t able to shower by herself. My gf said she came home with dirty shins as well, indicating that she may have fallen somewhere. 

What could be a medical term for this? Is it a form of panic attack? Anxiety attack? I need something to google so I can understand. Plus her partner is only now starting to believe this is a serious mental health issue and I would like to show him scientific articles mentioning these symptoms and possible diagnosis.",4.314858882125069,6.897294287769789,5.133956834532373,77.29885445489762,73.74820143884892,8.305700055340344,27.23907028223575,9.057496981413335,2.655271831765357,602,23,100,14,13,195,97,139,0.168,0.763,0.069,-0.9301,1,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,3,9,3,1,6,0,19,6,0,0,0,17,26,8,0,4,0,1,0,1,3,2,6,2,3,1,6,11,0,0,1,1,0,4,1,6,1,0,5,2,13,3,17,17,3,13,0,1,0,0,17,1,0,1,9,70,19,1,0.13116298608192925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033932534379557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4476504959149928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477757697269283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001551385953932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298529854508765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047229715571064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13522327930307712,0.11297048771735944,0.13312766991399128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956984440468316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27884024149469605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631343388327483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27380016051184203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407960970129478,0.0,0.0,0.11607511522404088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642658188631045,0.2643628802140419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19451138443917712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975536134582284,0.0,0.1538915035230507,0.0,0.0,0.1252099116164311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786655920657726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476603578550215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019513494591776,0.0,0.0,0.09283783664097396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13632856394952805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648219196916614,0.0,0.12432717432025565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654529422243564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793127652903335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548821601126924,0.0,0.0,0.09317442206268647,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tirchama,2020/02/26,"At a crossroad. I pulled all my weight into trying to be better the past few months. And I am doing much better compared to my lowest point, although I have been crying every day for the past two months.

Because part of me doesn't want to be happy. It doesn't feel like I deserve it.

But I also don't want to hurt myself anymore. 

I don't know what I'm looking for. I just don't know what to do right now.",1.0609482758620707,2.7676422643678222,2.8926293103448266,93.69342672413794,80.3793103448276,4.3500000000000005,18.92097701149425,3.1291,-0.6065850574712646,315,7,69,0,8,105,57,87,0.11900000000000001,0.74,0.142,0.6152,1,0,0,0,0,2,9.0,0,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,3,0,12,1,0,0,1,10,19,4,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,3,0,0,1,5,1,0,1,1,3,11,4,10,16,4,11,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,7,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542865814069287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927516988727241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847931745819335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437891195531021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21349400992033335,0.12534534387233054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16375566741263495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827364657979737,0.13884996198191185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068985513633982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20806510987049506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136290216195375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495388979450084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321243728569074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102706717540557,0.0,0.14287607753373902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210471634857462,0.3710749239649492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837318835882908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598134897061592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131956863757855,0.0,0.18986030127641906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292757059061381,0.0,0.0,0.23667665174438865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,disabledandthriving,2020/02/26,"Enjoyment? I used to enjoy things like video games, watching TV, camping, friends, playing board games, etc. these days I just look forward to going to bed.

Anyone else? How do you get out of the funk?",2.00108108108108,4.832723162162164,1.966270270270272,94.14562162162164,87.64864864864866,4.0410810810810815,23.616216216216216,5.6839178017228535,0.4255232432432439,155,6,29,1,5,46,33,37,0.0,0.6709999999999999,0.32899999999999996,0.9292,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,4,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,5,5,5,1,4,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,3,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602174158600258,0.3813138267048481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400073305658212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108853434457567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4150479887084109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28752380539872024,0.0,0.19443412312722394,0.0,0.21150262652308804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18181472811332747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31251405259998033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472413326848233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214199444164729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amyyy1234,2020/02/26,"Please help? - Struggling with depression and concentration Hey everyone,

​

I'm really struggling with concentration. I cannot figure out what to do.

I started taking anti-depressants in October, and felt better for awhile. Until I didn't. But there was no change as for concentration, really. I just felt felt a bit better overall.

Now, things just feel worse. I've been feeling not great for the past few weeks, and at times I feel pretty numb. Additionally, I have no motivation to do anything, and cannot concentrate when I try to study or even read for fun. My mind wonders so quickly.

I have a midterm tomorrow that I haven't really started studying for, and assignments due next week that I haven't started working on. But I just feel like I don't care. I'm less than a year away from finishing my degree but my marks have been plummeting and I just can't bring myself to do schoolwork or care about it, really. I feel so bad about it, because it is time and money, and it feels like I'm just wasting this opportunity. I really don't know what to do. 

Would appreciate any help/advice you're willing to offer.",3.2017541613316247,5.8496489812206605,4.417833973538201,80.63330665813062,77.96713615023474,7.816389244558258,25.64425949637217,8.710501217029153,2.2194807511737094,895,34,163,21,22,293,121,213,0.14400000000000002,0.727,0.128,-0.6604,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,5,14,14,0,2,4,0,21,1,0,1,0,38,42,18,0,1,11,0,9,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,10,12,0,0,13,1,1,1,11,5,0,0,7,9,19,9,24,33,3,23,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,3,19,108,29,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897585200385962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083165019393988,0.13550875614561955,0.07583728408878743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177128835018088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477651745922324,0.0,0.0931143697953966,0.06798143132601593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19726039044559388,0.12175073166190645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274037247516352,0.0,0.11797315504272965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19210367030128625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365777216110347,0.0,0.0,0.10656194223168364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383265518125069,0.15933952621602473,0.32122947260375995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295096657165484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149498734348097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06128836228144662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896587652069636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260320120857553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860256607112868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645826208963052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241524503363704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134557225758318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154997282843616,0.0,0.3572121782824437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368028525226305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331694044397629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384900626966278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408879579698922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005617738611105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571461976658021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890890393441605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209384594644895,0.08118773821788203,0.0,0.1136481974767089,0.07922046199014847,0.0,0.13550875614561955,0.07181509100845271
mentalhealth,driaaa_,2020/02/26,"Inner Child Work Help Due to my financial constraints I cannot afford to see a therapist, however, I have been encouraged to do some visiting of my child self to do work on trauma from when I was young. 

To give some context, my father was a severe alcoholic (though never abusive) and my mum would often go away for work and I would take care of my younger brother. I would be 4-8 years old and my brother would be 1-4 years old around that time. Our father's work had us move around a lot and I don't think we lived in a house for longer than a couple years. I lacked a lot of stability and vividly remember making and selling items as a child, as my parents often borrowed my little savings for food, gas, etc. My dad is now sober but we still have a strained relationship. My mum and I are very close.

When I was approximately 4 years old, I had a near death experience. I grounded the stove and fridge together and had 220-v travel through my heart. My then pregnant mum managed to disconnect me from the current but she and my brother, were also electrocuted. I am realizing I still carry guilt over that and never really confronted it, over 20+ years later. 

Since this NDE, I have developed an intense fear of suddenly dying. It could be that we accidentally under cook food and there's a pathogen, that I would be diagnosed with a rare condition etc. I am aware that it is extremely unlikely but this thought pattern has totally disabled my logic and often ends in panic attacks. When I was 11, I had a friend that was suddenly diagnosed with a rare form of leukemia and died less than a week after her diagnosis. I remember hearing about her death really made my confront my own morality and experienced my first panic attack. 

By a recommendation of a few different mental health professionals, I have been encouraged to revisit my child during some of these traumatic events and offer a support role. To give myself love, stability and support when I felt I never had it as a child. But whenever I try to do this ""journey"" I am completely inconsolable and often am crying within minutes. I don't know if this is healthy or a part of my processing? Any thoughts are appreciated. 

​

TLDR; Working through childhood trauma and told to visit my child in a meditation to offer support/love. Am left sobbing within minutes of trying to visit and don't know if this is a healthy part of processing.",7.184813186813187,7.307250481318682,7.7290659340659325,70.81843406593407,63.96703296703296,11.043956043956044,36.181318681318686,10.727762888450028,4.001087912087913,1919,85,338,46,26,636,229,455,0.14400000000000002,0.77,0.087,-0.9851,6,0,1,0,0,0,51.0,5,0,0,6,17,20,4,5,24,0,46,9,1,2,4,68,65,37,4,9,7,10,1,0,1,5,4,1,1,7,16,28,4,0,10,2,2,7,7,12,0,1,18,5,55,8,52,37,16,57,1,1,2,1,41,18,1,12,32,255,71,7,0.0,0.09110979436187384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217898727637048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06149411411483765,0.0,0.08331734031909849,0.09343768072256747,0.052292266117032235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690840015835365,0.0,0.17496177063937862,0.07224680577140616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840112046203282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062453145400393,0.0,0.0,0.061395608954249885,0.08508452966302121,0.08446720936747283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156096685216248,0.1596128813703632,0.08034049008530507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810748692288056,0.0,0.17151987859748727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521954554926227,0.0,0.08652995626233823,0.0,0.0,0.07383271200466288,0.0,0.0,0.06540813515456609,0.18596713886645566,0.0,0.05941005562916087,0.0,0.0,0.14753228539281826,0.043702060739024384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173739807498445,0.08666795945451408,0.09112273881510186,0.05154211213271834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872825232881451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452062567394432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835482869829753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707050802964642,0.06790103028606423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307493319727907,0.069402105731452,0.07276134041375952,0.05132901991489315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749359941906231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817288244762227,0.0,0.0,0.1779219953397372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24206986679722345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180442980774864,0.08538447822349245,0.16654286135759486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852375127316602,0.0,0.0,0.08255807785042339,0.17421751957614098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061276565484988325,0.0,0.08021983415325468,0.0868711726044492,0.0,0.06360959064642623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228193101262777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26178375698106066,0.0,0.0,0.057816608310610425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892827790455639,0.0,0.049272180946401636,0.07555043415127807,0.12209448469110863,0.04483897544429593,0.0,0.0,0.07347791403767971,0.0,0.10441537017988503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249703779897768,0.0,0.0,0.0634476769443242,0.0,0.0,0.06168174485449606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27990788853665804,0.0,0.0,0.27312538483399945,0.0,0.09343768072256747,0.2475941679185299
mentalhealth,Patato34,2020/02/26,"I dont feel human For as long as I can remember i've felt like i'm pretending everything I do. I don't get excited, I don't want to try new things and I don't like talking to people. In fact just about everything I do socially feels like im just going through the motions of it. I'm on zoloft now which kinda helped me stop overthinking all of it and just stop caring but idk if this is as good as it gets or if anyone else has this problem. I basically feel like im something else pretending to be a human and its tenfold when im in a social situation.",2.428166666666669,3.441606150000002,4.851666666666667,84.02666666666667,75.0,8.666666666666668,26.66666666666667,9.150863307647796,2.0529166666666683,438,16,97,10,9,155,72,120,0.099,0.75,0.151,0.7093,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,3,0,10,1,0,0,2,22,21,12,0,4,7,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,8,3,0,2,5,2,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,4,9,7,15,19,1,11,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,4,10,58,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017477716142582,0.1490977536022937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483626783325936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17054299947340187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431189382047685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26155977004840675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22073092000914374,0.2079125036274144,0.13971763205699975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205161183069307,0.0,0.08269977191251006,0.1220514382185702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975359249697474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4715449028617166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843659540779433,0.0,0.0,0.1287765758844995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14053970844474242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088207662042446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13923861361429735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16484061493288474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635654394637398,0.0,0.296669310094961,0.0,0.1120248867658264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433148293974773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695979009708216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667398536134914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879542465518036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582877041424374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spartan_0069,2020/02/26,"I don't understand how depression feels. But I feel very lost right now and maybe this is a good place to speak up a little since I don't know who to talk to right now. So there is a dream I have. I want to be a doctor. And in my country there is this test which is very   competitive which you need to clear to get into a medical college. A little bit about me first. I have grown up in a city environment and my school was not very competitive. I was rather good at school. I got a 95 percent in my 10 grade and a 92 in my grade 12. However admission to medical college is not done via those examinations. There is a seperate exam. It was a month or so after my grade 12 exam. I cleared the cutoff however didn't get a college (that's because the acceptance ratio is very low because of the huge amount of students who sit for the exam and thus just clearing the cutoff is not enough to get a good college. You need a pretty high rank) I didn't perform very well there. So I decided to take a drop year. I was very motivated in the beginning and was getting good marks in the exams conducted by my coaching class. But recently (maybe a month or so) I am not able to study. I feel low. Burnout. Idk. I practically stopped studying. I just listen to music and lie down. Use my laptop from time to time. Try to study but I just fucking can't. Idk what happened. I was never pressurized by my parents or friends or school but there was a part of me that always thought I could get what I want. Since my school was not very competitive and thus I never saw how tough it actually was. I have pressurized myself. And this pressure is killing me. I have about 3 months for my second chance and I feel like I can't do it. There are students out there studying for 2-3 years for this and what I am doing. Procrastinating. Being lazy. Idk. Everything was so good in the beginning of this academic session and now I feel like this is the lowest point in my life. 
I have many great friends but society has made me believe that when you use social media and hangout and waste time you wount be able to crazk this exam and this I quit social media. I lost touch with all my friends. I do get calls from a few of them who are worried what happened to me. But now I don't even want to talk to them. I feel like a failure. I could have gone to an engineering college where I got admission but I convinced my parents to let me take a drop and study to become a doctor. But I feel that was the biggest mistake of the life. I should have settled with what I was getting. Most of them went off to collleges and at having a pretty good time while I am sitting in my room studying the same shit I studied in grade 11 and 12. 
After all this. After I took a drop. After all the pressure I put on myself. After all this expectations ppl had from me. I feel I will disappoint everyone around me. Myself included. And get into an engineering college after all. I feel like i have forgotten everything I have studied and with just about 2 months left idk what the fuck I will do. 
I don't even know what I wrote and if it made any sense. But I needed this. I don't want to talk to my mother about this because I know she will be very worried about me and I don't want that. Sorry for the long rant. And thanks to Reddit for giving me a place to rant. Thanks.",1.373162894895145,3.602960385861565,2.9983339210520867,90.59945031010807,82.10751104565537,6.0050281067850415,22.37634051733079,7.253080693524567,0.7722446057790036,2598,87,554,37,71,855,245,679,0.121,0.74,0.14,0.8455,5,0,0,0,0,0,63.0,0,4,3,8,34,35,4,4,41,0,65,9,1,9,10,107,120,46,1,15,24,3,10,4,3,4,6,2,1,0,34,30,0,1,18,3,0,5,17,16,1,2,28,13,91,19,78,81,13,76,0,6,1,2,27,36,3,6,34,394,125,31,0.11485897683931365,0.0,0.056042896394285134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477859349455512,0.0,0.0,0.03905402146643818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051124420452095545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502544929814886,0.06342635795375795,0.0,0.0647033672360692,0.0,0.0,0.06269812724717097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05864192867820678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170554684618434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04946393422359669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756302978661355,0.0,0.058770305745806335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05934001340743556,0.0,0.07586327094155679,0.0,0.0,0.05487633727164055,0.10322784223359464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613426741722915,0.1641105520078288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048849493511892335,0.0,0.0,0.13310964087906393,0.10618527327505026,0.24003629907638646,0.05509159832382117,0.0,0.2890147809767116,0.09186321634561816,0.06331621372657606,0.0,0.0,0.10156941389140883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067740761307828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353722004975003,0.0,0.09468523477370988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0623973072043724,0.05872554287598328,0.08112829212510224,0.11222858866533997,0.11511886932889072,0.0,0.05082329005078821,0.0,0.0,0.12538214133859807,0.0,0.0,0.10868234105923467,0.0,0.058224487342896813,0.115391280330869,0.0,0.0,0.11570833538838385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18335867898916386,0.0,0.0,0.12774971393031012,0.08858632376979579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275373011365738,0.06219053949569666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200031843100296,0.0,0.054289429407695,0.0,0.0,0.11685287199312824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057732497992892325,0.0,0.061083330069763915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056704691469304735,0.0,0.0,0.09808893864198663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23248683317900096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058950544578853466,0.09501253256139676,0.0,0.0,0.11708426235565328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642876104643374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048013623841098384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635965620712613,0.13847894220408785,0.0,0.105746714083426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04559259886910098,0.13395038613285562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380627473915931,0.038990852866320085,0.0,0.0,0.05978612280455226,0.0,0.09920127787521237,0.0,0.37908273959038746,0.1693670010832565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051636007093563495,0.053237711126445666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664486636773695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396541528503905
mentalhealth,logmichael94,2020/02/26,Had a panic attack So I’ve been suffering from anxiety and depression and I occasionally have panic attacks well I just so happened to have one right after sex.. I explained to the girl that I get them sometimes and told her I took medication. I’m worried she thinks I’m weird now and what can I do to stop one from happening?,2.125318681318681,4.622736784615388,4.188351648351649,81.57307692307694,81.15384615384616,7.406593406593408,26.20879120879121,8.418075326091056,2.1432637362637363,261,11,50,6,7,89,46,65,0.371,0.6,0.028999999999999998,-0.9723,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,5,8,2,2,2,0,6,2,0,0,0,8,15,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,7,1,2,4,0,9,1,6,11,0,5,0,2,0,1,6,1,0,0,3,36,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15279465786790786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4544486363870759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202913175668427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10435187972901801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532452151054121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20120927284003975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706875424321914,0.0,0.0,0.4686856234884268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705702873657171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19754034545405028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698514082076174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798038886484495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908527658182879,0.2219099272287503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17958331877795006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20283783932762514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,canluckrunout,2020/02/26,"They say you shouldn’t blame your upbringing for how you are. I do This is my first ever reddit post so may not be posting in the right section and This is going to be lengthy but will try to stay as concise as ever. 
I think I am a truly messed up human being as a result of others with selfish agendas. 
I really need to talk about my life somehow somewhere. 

Quick Flash I’m 26[M] and I’ve been facing the same personal life issues for so long now that I don’t know what my take on it is anymore. 
I was born in London, moved to America at the age of 6 left there at the age of 13( moved from state to state while there because of my stepdad ), moved to Africa and was there 5 years but spent each year in a different school thanks to my unruliness. Moved to England at 18 and went straight to boarding school, then straight to uni, dropped out after 3/4 years of not accomplishing anything but repeated years. Ran to NY for a year because someone offered me a better life, didnt work, under the mercy of my father to leave NY, got sent to Africa as a punishment and then eventually returned back to the UK. 

To start with my mother; 
My mother always put her relationships before me. Growing up, I was always moving from one continent to another and even while in one continent, constant moves were always made for various reasons. I say this because the start of my life was always on a temporary basis. I accepted in a way that all things , situations and all people were always going to be temporary. It came as a shock knowing that people actually grew up together or had memories of at least more than a year together. 
Now I’m going to emphasise here that in my current lifetime, the faintest memories I have being a child have held more golden to me than any moments being an adult and that’s just because I knew I was truly happy and didn’t know what was ahead of me. 
At age 13,  I left living with my mother to move to Africa to meet my biological father and his side of the family. The reason for this move was  because I had become so much of a nuisance in America and the African  culture was to Instil some discipline into me. 
This move again was the hardest for me because I was actually having to start life again but without my mother. 
Although I moved to Africa, my father resided in England with his wife so I was left at the mercy of my aunts, uncles and grandparents who all agreed for me to go straight into boarding school because I could influence their kids(my cousins). 

I found boarding school in Africa so hard because of the culture shock and bullying. Also being a less developed country I started to feel miserable remembering my old life. I eventually adapted learning a few bad subtle traits that have stuck with me till today. 
Not entirely knowing my father,I’d see him briefly whenever he’d travel back for a business trip or whatever so no real relationship in my opinion has ever been developed. I feel like he assumed the father role rather than actually trying  to become one to me. 

I would also like to say that my personality and character in the time, started to become less and less and less of me because I lost focus of who I was trying to make sense of my environment, trying to please those around me because I was dependent on them, trying to adapt to a culture that wasn’t known to me, trying to be liked and not bullied, trying to be a pleaser. I never felt good enough being myself.  
This did not play well for me when I realised I liked animals and had a passion for them. When I’d speak about it, I’d be told things like there’s no money in the animal industry, who wants to work with animals, you’ll never be rich, even my step mother (fathers wife) told me to research how to become a meat inspector when I didn’t get the grades for learning veterinary. This really broke me. Her vindictive,manipulative, uncaring, condescending, bitchy way/ of talking and treating me really got the best of me especially as my father couldn’t perceive her behaviour and I didn’t know any better than to try and keep pleasing her who would not accept me genuinely. This has really played an issue in my life because I can’t take someone’s opinions with open mind. I constantly compare myself to everyone and anything. Even if my girlfriend likes the lyrics of a song I’d take it personal  ‘just because’. 

Sorry for diverting there, I’m so sensitive about what I’ve been through. 

Moving on, after secondary school in Africa, I came to England with creating a relationship with my father at the back of my mind. 
I personally wanted to do my a levels living at home so I could be mentored but my step mother suggested looking at boarding schools and this became the ideal. 
So again I never got to develop a close relationship with him or anyone long term because again I was passed on. 

I also would like to say that my fathers side of the family is pretty well off financially as opposed to my mothers side which is quite mediocre in comparison. I say this so you understand my next point. 

After moving over to Africa to live under the influence of my paternal family, life did  really get better thanks to the wealth. I made a wrong decision to think I was entitled to such a lifestyle and got comfortable with not needing to do anything for myself but just be alive.  I really liked their lifestyle. It’s all they showed me. Go to boarding school, get money from us and just be alive. That’s how I was programmed. And being raised in Africa, I never got into routine of job seeking, exploring, thinking about my future, planning etc, I greatly lacked such skills and still do to today.  I am so lazy 

What is my character like now? 
At first glance and meet, you would take an instant liking to me. I am well spoken, articulate enough to give the impression you like the likes of me. I also give off the vibe I am going places, destined for greatness and talented. I am the perfect person to be questioned about myself because I can give perfect answers. 

But I am not that person. I am stoic in nature I am very weak inside. Believe very little in myself. Think about the thought of suicide but can never attempt. Always feeling like a victim, very defensive and almost jealous of progress that’s not mine. I want to be a great achiever I want peace of mind, genuineness happiness and to love. But I am completely damaged the light at my tunnel may be coming from the light of the end of another tunnel. Angry at the family I’ve been born into. Feel outcasted and unsought 

I guess after writing all of this, my main point is the kind of habits I have formed over two decades feel so irreversible. 
I have probably missed a lot out to inform you guys on but I hope you get the drift of my inner core at the minute. 

I want to change my life. I have always wanted to. I just don’t do it. I just don’t. And thinking positive being positive only lasts so long before I am back being so deep and negative inside.",5.7712753188297095,6.5728446684171065,6.477505626406598,76.22928169542388,67.0570142535634,9.290772693173293,31.70405101275319,9.381033105699352,2.8995632408102017,5505,216,984,103,86,1810,488,1333,0.091,0.762,0.147,0.9982,5,0,0,0,0,1,120.0,1,9,6,21,69,61,4,1,68,0,104,13,1,12,15,188,186,85,1,21,31,19,7,13,1,9,10,7,1,10,42,58,0,5,35,5,5,34,29,16,3,6,54,19,157,45,203,98,28,185,0,5,3,2,90,73,0,17,83,737,199,19,0.0,0.0,0.09572562806042996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032742335512375736,0.0,0.0,0.10459435261307998,0.19045155589715596,0.0,0.0,0.04447153845462242,0.06857343254609073,0.0,0.0,0.0324276414012636,0.022863210056238988,0.0,0.0807230327654637,0.029108162805455237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057101071736944,0.027301473983336856,0.2790536622742169,0.14444953993796456,0.05564719929048892,0.036839462059690915,0.03431454598558602,0.08675620255273693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747956290994907,0.0,0.0,0.03459016079052581,0.028166441810765507,0.03428324317517778,0.07066986896015308,0.0,0.05221340338250465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034162462822854504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028960733093493188,0.06757157365764255,0.036466926388833004,0.06479018506205919,0.08873167077221449,0.0,0.031244351434100412,0.0,0.0,0.12329910157728015,0.0,0.0826654859366103,0.04671893220200999,0.03139521897727593,0.0,0.0,0.05562582411826277,0.0,0.03585168212563602,0.0,0.0,0.06833344623712022,0.09410073693012204,0.11149820149420217,0.02742554087804913,0.13075793493476198,0.1081490200424931,0.03602054630809934,0.032376172369762805,0.0,0.06961528297069246,0.029290995950648113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03279877178086678,0.032476503492178864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825645803606503,0.032447731238990495,0.029063495193234718,0.0,0.03404994749328654,0.0898498605524022,0.026653243691430444,0.0,0.03462247318368815,0.10657945619718588,0.0,0.20786015401063493,0.20766975947266048,0.032771997812132934,0.0866188301932753,0.08681013425825028,0.02745809463407821,0.0,0.035693742351566506,0.02779868026626914,0.029511232186424163,0.061879298575022675,0.021826176722524498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099047012023756,0.0,0.0,0.4170337409831533,0.02403680089036481,0.04849032274009708,0.12609361200701352,0.0,0.03477470640743135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03431106289498924,0.0,0.06647105690338871,0.024868311336432428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04533736851607168,0.17130385563913125,0.034162462822854504,0.07178519566407196,0.061820380000011575,0.0,0.0626313133112117,0.03326563305933357,0.03525398698423078,0.0,0.0,0.032870533022811906,0.03662925640987532,0.03477836033439412,0.0,0.03721749583495887,0.12568310150201584,0.06723800377386388,0.0,0.14042171076112409,0.03704047317417632,0.027923923343841285,0.0,0.13001385658060288,0.0,0.23164493461828484,0.026056081909264023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03675393515818759,0.0,0.0,0.05540983843041501,0.0,0.0,0.036602747086845806,0.1157191049303572,0.03485172987696439,0.02611267439159577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035766317711764264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833934196107384,0.052562846472177384,0.0,0.06020787213747519,0.0,0.0,0.04344621212285235,0.10475782808862202,0.0,0.025958568896622243,0.01906647358018576,0.0,0.061987783651178976,0.062488702868200824,0.0,0.1775984287931229,0.0,0.031941206236490466,0.0340397833503561,0.03933168209051936,0.0,0.0,0.08093785222764342,0.11571680690692862,0.051908319460927416,0.0,0.0,0.08819831820948182,0.03031138444513863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03151971645988234,0.0,0.04760908391673509,0.0,0.0,0.09291091747597874,0.03575014278808802,0.0,0.12633868497975947
mentalhealth,slavorgie,2020/02/26,"I get uncomfortable/angry when people worry about me, give me advice or form strong attachments to me any advice on why this is and how i can remedy this",12.880999999999998,7.320342433333334,12.63,57.94500000000002,58.0,16.0,36.66666666666666,13.023866798666859,4.542666666666667,123,2,22,3,1,42,25,30,0.09,0.743,0.16699999999999998,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,3,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,17,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6997149655516526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24346899633249666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18705306977707,0.3434498073848962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24820916911223198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230615025870973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635913470050284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bunniboilerr,2020/02/26,"Anyone know why I hate silence? I cannot stand being in a room where people aren’t talking. Even when i’m watching a film at home, i hate when the people i’m watching with aren’t interacting with me. I need people to be talking to or around me or else i feel like everyone hates me and i’ve annoyed them. silence makes me so uncomfortable.",1.7371428571428569,3.9198932857142883,3.481428571428569,87.91357142857143,80.42857142857143,5.7142857142857135,24.285714285714285,6.868970318607317,0.9098571428571433,270,10,55,3,7,90,46,70,0.233,0.731,0.036000000000000004,-0.9296,2,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,6,5,4,0,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,10,14,6,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,3,10,1,7,12,0,8,0,0,2,0,4,5,0,2,3,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537658478605486,0.0,0.0,0.1850853527411303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368341523495506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732361304193955,0.0,0.0,0.19866838882955998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512632299299236,0.1485320475924612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6158088128413606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20855222932173026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426274646894635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10157507770786008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13878256916034573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541637744172594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43241905545026943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33422284482198805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18760782864537734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,def_98,2020/02/26,"Opening up about how i feel Had to make a throwaway account as ive never opened up about myself online before. Im currently 21, soon to be 22, studying in my masters year of uni in a course i know ill end up not using. I've had mental health issues from the age of 14, when i was younger i used to cut myself and carve words into my legs or places nobody saw. I had home issues, my parents would often fight and my dad would often take it out on me.     Ive had anxiety issues and battles on and off with depression since i was 14. I can remember exactly how i felt at that age, similar to how i feel now with so much anger and hatred for myself and people around me. As i got older i learned to control my feelings better and eventually started dating at around 16/17. I thought i had a good thing going but as relationships at that age go, it fizzled out before a year. When i went to university i thought this would make or break me, if i couldnt enjoy living in my own skin during what's meant to be the best time in your life then whats the point. I met a girl in my first year, we clicked immediately and started dating. She wasnt my first relationship but we quickly began dating and seeing each other 24/7. We fell in love and i realised for the first time how different a relationship can be when youre that bit older and have deep rooted feelings for someone. For the first time in my life,  i felt truly accepted and loved and cared for. We split up prematurely and it really broke me. For a year i would cry myself to sleep, often contemplating suicide at the thought of not seeing her again or feeling that loved again. Two and a half years have passed since then, and im still single. I've seen other people in that time and had a few one night stands but every girl i spend time with doesn't give me that same spark that i once felt. I have no feelings or lingering desire to see my ex during this time although i kept finding myself comparing people to the way i felt when i met her.

Last week my ex tragically died in a road accident. I hadn't thought about her for a while, but the news hit me harder than i ever thought it would. This whole week has been a real strain on me mentally. I'm expected to hand in essays next week but every time i wake up i think of our relationship and the person i loved in that car. Its so fucked and i know its not normal or healthy but its what i feel. It just reinforced to me how fragile everything is, in that anyone could die at any time.

I didn't really know how to end this or explain myself further but i just wanted to write about where i am mentally atm. I knew i couldnt get real support from my friend circle as they simply have never known me to have any underlying issues as i hide everyday. I think ive reached the point of having little to no self esteem, and find it hard to relate to my friends happiness which makes me feel even more broken and almost like a fraud trying to fit in. 

Tbh i dont even care about anyone reading this, i just wanted to tell someone how i feel.",5.591235334713595,5.189419257648955,6.3409864274212095,81.20281159420294,67.37359098228663,9.093922245226594,28.531907062341844,8.505502328695277,1.8503657786979524,2393,67,495,31,35,790,285,621,0.136,0.752,0.11199999999999999,-0.9122,3,0,0,0,2,2,45.0,5,2,1,8,36,25,5,1,23,0,39,14,5,14,4,130,100,57,3,14,20,4,17,1,2,5,4,0,1,4,30,36,0,2,32,1,3,6,14,9,0,7,31,23,87,16,81,57,10,107,0,3,6,5,37,44,1,11,55,348,117,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057943550986489636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870052076520541,0.0,0.04426665223250932,0.0,0.0,0.0809212633660648,0.0,0.0,0.10302443544404064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847789654849326,0.0,0.06072586496288634,0.051176989131890886,0.06317371528045991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799467621327416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490064338493047,0.04620058333848507,0.0,0.06356210830418131,0.0,0.0,0.049839136103285935,0.0,0.1201097008931409,0.060456725991703625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781748020952183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250262776610224,0.0,0.0,0.0764387213642421,0.05234230656884468,0.0975077049832869,0.0,0.0520054314267863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633250531344906,0.0,0.222238327605458,0.0,0.10577532795396916,0.1968801385438003,0.0,0.0,0.08941288385247244,0.05349536354101018,0.03023213268206344,0.05550948807664074,0.06577215320859099,0.04853451048409927,0.04628001607836881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06159848763272505,0.05183577441108116,0.0,0.0,0.061507908072843474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058043425285302624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500850114621814,0.2415845720519864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09540345661804034,0.04716778936572796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174367964287868,0.028269970802803936,0.05799604385089475,0.05109595396045268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089020908385565,0.0,0.1158762346030918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494326837742374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042537515303895164,0.0,0.08925828316232894,0.0,0.06154020298880637,0.05430248764365217,0.05669552375181041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06162445567834503,0.0392108973956319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425235890920276,0.0,0.0,0.12034914811794645,0.05052558376425996,0.060456725991703625,0.0,0.10940246883674194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057880771037793675,0.13172633129284864,0.0741397448294386,0.0,0.0,0.24850189913978196,0.06554989167221621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383330071289752,0.0,0.06036593164111528,0.0,0.0,0.09573323707814477,0.0,0.057906901408506135,0.0,0.09805784309529073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819144480894922,0.0,0.046211153124099374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329504054917759,0.06566464327048595,0.0,0.0,0.043507362759336296,0.0,0.050576658323256835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03844300914879482,0.0741552544508338,0.0,0.22969217633073444,0.2699328967803105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039286612625743976,0.0,0.056525806213014874,0.0,0.0,0.0999537555442571,0.0,0.0,0.06826068448366149,0.04593063244023002,0.13924770722952765,0.0,0.0,0.05364153847254194,0.0,0.06460433097273016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20552857637232586,0.0,0.0,0.1863161744607321
mentalhealth,DaBears3810,2020/02/26,"Is there a link between weed and schizophrenia There is schizophrenia in my family and I have heard that smoking can make schizophrenia come on up to 3 years earlier. I'm just wondering if that is true and if there is any link between weed and schizophrenia. 

I have smoked daily for a while now and want to know if I should continue.

Thank you",3.766363636363636,6.097911090909093,3.3606060606060595,90.5609090909091,74.45454545454545,6.824242424242425,26.15151515151515,7.793537801064563,1.4266242424242432,276,10,54,4,6,82,42,66,0.0,0.895,0.105,0.6808,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,1,1,18,16,9,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,2,8,14,0,8,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,4,4,39,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866756608057441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36313712541727705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974098114177941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316786784738414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813949709060401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3881163577988251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486473614296291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4571644831481671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714712020352628
mentalhealth,NicoDsx,2020/02/26,"Trouble in finding happiness Over the years I tried to understand why I've always felt this sense of  unhappiness. In the past 2 years I've discovered a lot about myself and  started to understand who I was as a person. I discovered I was an INFJ, read tons of books and articles about, discovered I had a passion for  writing, and also learned I had an anxiety disorder (I'm mostly saying  this as a background information, since I don't know if it has anything  to do with my post). This helped me see clearer into my own feelings,  but I feel I've only scratched the surface of who I am.

I know INFJs tend to be hard on themselves, to always seek perfection in their relationships, finding meaning in their lives in general, I've started to work on myself on these points, but still I can't seem to feel at happy with my life. The things that bring me  the most joy are my writing, which give me a sense of purpose, and  every activities that keeps my mind off of reality, such as music, video  games, reading, and in some way sports. Seeing my friends always makes  happy, thank god. When I'm doing these, I feel very happy most of the  time, but as soon as they stop, I feel all those negatives emotions  slowly coming back, like when clouds start to cover the sky and the air  feels heavy. I get sad again, feel like I don't belong anywhere, and  start questioning every single aspect of my life all over again. And  sometimes even if I do something to take my mind of things, the cloud is  still there in my head. Sometimes when I get stressed or anxious and I  manage to calm myself down, I feel these emotions again afterwards,  without any apparent reason.

I get and got this feeling in many others circumstances. I hate having to go  to work, because once there I'll start to overthink my life, despite  being focus on the task I'm performing. I hate having to find a job,  because many of them never make me fulfil or content. I hate going to  sleep, because sometimes when I'm trying to fall asleep, I overthink my  life again, daydream, and feel lonely. Even with my friends, I sometimes  feel I'm less than them, or that they wouldn't care if I stopped seeing  them.

There are good days though,  and time when I feel very happy and content, I cherish these moments  and periods of time, but overall I feel either neutral, sad, or  cloud-minded. This is annoying me and getting me down, because I can't  focus or understand what is wrong. Is it me? Is it my life style? Or  something else I need to change?

I'm  sorry if this post is too vague, but I tried my best to express myself. Does anyone relate to this feeling? What should I do in your opinion?",7.522656932108988,6.569883954990221,7.361888454011744,77.28712893271113,63.65753424657535,9.818485623965076,34.918034020773746,8.730908602173464,2.841866716844798,2075,78,390,25,26,662,239,511,0.10800000000000001,0.7490000000000001,0.14300000000000002,0.9776,2,2,2,0,0,0,68.0,0,1,7,5,24,28,4,1,18,0,28,9,3,3,4,89,85,42,0,7,17,0,17,2,2,2,5,1,0,1,26,20,0,3,29,6,0,5,8,10,0,0,6,21,66,18,62,75,13,63,0,3,3,1,23,24,0,18,33,267,92,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04851181225912997,0.1514282814919118,0.0,0.0,0.04125260820469059,0.0,0.046406677956528836,0.06853140461943281,0.0,0.04241665926237076,0.0,0.04992010260174165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04664574968669817,0.0,0.14791728819839672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366159437949838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061849503672122476,0.0,0.06417292499492988,0.05225540779189985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0391223205696491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952452774014646,0.0,0.05308619857798395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050675769102622524,0.13647438772919873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013407264518907,0.0,0.1022216145840923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42941924931355213,0.043337331534809925,0.05824555268271421,0.0,0.16633339091208074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373545766035883,0.0,0.12677469603497404,0.058193037123612165,0.06895184023464461,0.050880861420987814,0.04851737580450168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32288201546917084,0.05434172155344762,0.17967510121040234,0.06225726838686318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040660822636652084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06019821173036319,0.053919653869802214,0.0,0.0,0.06667709233214655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21423873417418896,0.05927330686745395,0.0,0.05356613524487296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051573123192128666,0.0,0.0,0.080985434570416,0.12300459077381402,0.0,0.06607929117052985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18375562091383355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04498050562737626,0.046786691479515724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460362653788222,0.0,0.04613659612072543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057909259659063975,0.0,0.05296819108881412,0.0,0.0,0.05734570927443351,0.0,0.1161958915367402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795592938830194,0.0,0.12135791463596793,0.0,0.0,0.062371195657621926,0.0,0.06512886689732825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04824128755674262,0.0,0.0,0.14502057392716136,0.05522489915802355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05018068092755849,0.0,0.060706350934563974,0.0,0.0,0.0934019757969,0.23998721742831286,0.06790674832757368,0.2146862943525319,0.0,0.09689036748322256,0.10143320141852047,0.06948873595613063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045610681415560565,0.0,0.0,0.05584991764248733,0.0,0.0,0.0806029936882301,0.0,0.05960063870174901,0.0,0.10611844677931087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12355765038768002,0.0,0.0,0.1894555342209664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010589912566334,0.0,0.04815110157411207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05473850795377571,0.0,0.0,0.05847652494276648,0.0,0.08832610492237955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632496580722401,0.0,0.07812937523151392
mentalhealth,anty_5566,2020/02/26,"My friend is bipolar My friend (17) had a really bad upbringing. He lost his parents at an early age, he takes care of his severely disabled brother, and his foster parents are abusive. He feels like he has bi-polar depression because of how bad his life has been. There is a history of mental health issues in his family, he went to his foster parents about it but they refuse to get him help. My friend on numerous occasions has talked about getting help and has even mentioned suicide at some points. He has even told me that I am a reason he’s still alive. I found a place nearby that will treat him without a cost and his parents wouldn’t know but he refused the help. 

I’m really worried about him and idk what to do. He’s also going far for college and I won’t be able to help him if he has these bad thoughts again. I’m also the only person he ever told any of this to. Any advice?",2.860500000000002,4.567010716666669,4.102222222222224,87.02500000000002,75.16666666666666,6.8000000000000025,24.777777777777786,7.554174236665415,1.2128444444444444,699,23,140,9,15,229,109,180,0.16699999999999998,0.674,0.159,-0.1955,4,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,1,1,12,11,0,0,8,0,17,3,0,2,1,20,32,11,1,2,4,5,1,1,3,3,3,0,0,1,6,5,0,2,5,0,1,2,3,5,0,0,8,1,19,6,18,20,1,14,0,2,0,0,42,7,0,2,6,86,25,1,0.11305983358358422,0.13395741511574585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048076087253754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18082781613879895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15376912764745854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28320071558966736,0.06892022516911721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527203538137945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737826899734407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14934990757854333,0.10226909227398018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658274903509138,0.0,0.05716644892776172,0.08076996770253549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239642719079357,0.26204924090890164,0.0,0.11813819334975485,0.0,0.06425450889043828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017731618318254,0.0,0.0,0.30312649300827016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800509239432598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06213472776745198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798575040365933,0.05523532381615669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341816394487777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139377202955982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598709811153721,0.0,0.0,0.5021582618613429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987194857641114,0.11812346253591445,0.0,0.10687808690423327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448580489122789,0.11624433901261752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12772543074727308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09028972914519116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366910758690393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500692438495842,0.0908732116041052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975687895940462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21606703212368245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048075984299852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089856450250052,0.0,0.0,0.1148177490590518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iliketonukeitnukeit,2020/02/26,"Help. Fuck man, anyone here have deeply rooted abuse, depression and anxiety that healed, but was then severely triggered by workplace stress?

My work has been fucking with me for the past year, trying every avenue to fuck with my career and it is beginning to drive me insane. I don’t feel safe at home (I live in a small town), I am afraid to go to work, and I am afraid to work. I can’t trust anyone and I don’t think everyone is out to get me, but I just don’t want to take my chances anymore. 

I’m on the verge, and I’m scared.",1.0551842751842777,3.038463396396395,2.484193284193285,95.22515970515973,81.70270270270271,5.838165438165437,19.0999180999181,6.980632752743323,0.08310090090090094,411,10,94,5,11,133,73,111,0.22699999999999998,0.664,0.109,-0.9420000000000001,0,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,2,10,3,4,3,0,12,4,0,2,0,17,24,8,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,8,0,1,2,0,0,2,4,8,0,0,2,1,13,2,15,22,0,13,0,1,0,3,2,7,3,0,4,55,15,4,0.0,0.21798603200064606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074407803243993,0.0,0.18245856961739806,0.2572859710704044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15846157111557654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15501095459906114,0.17580062640840485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302573772838946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5102592069336759,0.09612187564901413,0.0,0.10455998586621347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12331781213464428,0.0,0.184546785573842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16245757401257746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756295800335234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841959206271993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20784485733853697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107482911176434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832994704507348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788685604825055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491023816269538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851607947506642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4018185555689381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847698831739953
mentalhealth,onelonelypotato,2020/02/26,I can't get anything done in class.. I try to focus and concentrate on the subject but I just can't. My brain wanders off in othe thoughts that definitely aren't relevant. I try soo stupidly hard. Why can't I? Is there something wrong with me? Am I just dumb? Does anyone else feel like this or is it just me? My teachers get annoyed with me because I'm a bad and awful student. How do I change? I'm trying so hard but no one seems to notice.,-0.4311414392059554,1.8124659354838712,1.6645161290322577,95.87062034739456,93.9462365591398,4.151861042183623,21.13234077750207,5.8734145424116955,0.0860693134822168,344,13,76,3,13,114,65,93,0.298,0.639,0.063,-0.9783,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,3,0,2,1,9,1,1,1,0,14,16,7,0,0,6,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,2,3,12,1,8,14,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,1,47,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14444620332581498,0.2116665956470067,0.16999851982340422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724864641662767,0.12592982956500395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306126603658105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185352532006977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18078038126856175,0.2114040349889656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17257187564470014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10445353526696474,0.14758147179282424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21586003988156546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701119087210921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092501725100664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23519378052295625,0.0,0.0,0.13998459792144854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18806353803313752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15903610776533594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16400219880171488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4207647136933258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18640717555654332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258638389531796,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IWillBe-JustFine,2020/02/26,"Today is another rough day. I got plenty of sleep yesterday. Went home from work specifically because of how I was feeling and passed out for 4 hours. Woke up feeling great. Went to bed a couple hours later and this morning I'm funky again.

I just feel.... frustrated? Uneasy? Like something is wrong. Like... I'm wrong. Like I'm messing up bad and I don't know how to stop it.

I reached out to my therapist. My neuro testing is on the 13th so I didn't want to see her until afterwards but I think I need to get some feelings off my chest.",-0.004759174311928405,2.3505848715596365,1.89806766055046,93.58820240825693,94.77981651376145,4.926834862385323,20.573967889908253,6.6274283507984215,0.4740499999999997,417,15,88,6,16,137,76,109,0.141,0.765,0.09300000000000001,-0.6137,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,1,0,2,0,6,2,2,2,0,19,23,8,0,2,2,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,5,0,1,6,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,6,6,12,4,16,17,1,19,0,0,1,0,1,6,0,1,13,48,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836666584776105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14624819880972287,0.10677365809147346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938071205108884,0.0,0.11296132672864967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3542571636780793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151194031446226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14008849834231993,0.1931104451711376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17569605578990286,0.0,0.3449873567355338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626132477033053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567175701434383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987618113164212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957689792112538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528280129025214,0.0,0.0,0.1348438813376566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643851437917388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033699708579455,0.0,0.11223308806352612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16602769712589144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331172712799194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32474330003106777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751587650639454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3830118471361192,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,floeticallyspeaking,2020/02/26,"Putting Myself Out There & Chatting My Business Hi Guys & Gals,

My name is Dan Hawthorne. I'm 29 years old, based in Manchester UK and for the longest time I've been wanting to find a way to be able to express myself creatively.

I've always struggled with being able to accept myself for a multitude of reasons such as being gay, being overweight, feeling ugly and being afraid that I won't be accepted by others for being who I am.

I'm on my path to a better mindset and I'm sharing my stories, experiences and thoughts with the world through my new podcast 'Chattin' My Business' due to officially launch next week.

I've uploaded the first two episodes to SoundCloud ahead of the official launch in the hope to get some feedback from you guys before it becomes available everywhere. I'd really love to hear what your thoughts are and if you enjoy what you hear!

[**LISTEN HERE!!**](https://soundcloud.com/user-971652941/sets/chattin-my-business-podcast)

I'd love to meet people who have experienced similar things and make new friends along the way!",7.0001852597664165,8.506201052356023,6.264607329842935,76.31707209021346,64.65445026178011,8.599436165928314,36.68183648811921,8.841846274778883,3.3708732178815954,855,42,139,13,13,261,121,191,0.05,0.79,0.159,0.9707,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,4,0,3,2,11,0,2,9,0,13,4,0,4,0,25,28,8,0,3,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,3,0,2,8,10,1,0,7,1,0,1,1,2,0,2,3,5,15,9,27,17,1,18,0,0,0,3,20,5,0,3,10,84,23,1,0.2897440467385186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054512889904595,0.3139375535874009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599997677945315,0.12327542155853136,0.0,0.0,0.1281275317700062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171263761691674,0.0,0.0,0.0732516479327522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241040478150792,0.12322806906998456,0.0,0.0,0.11192776588449774,0.0,0.07568965283817987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868921597652695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.326562598630208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389060760618522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26150531454437004,0.0,0.09670320054867836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27983660584949643,0.15407304039047878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15201881842862175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004360199153541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14563639740745565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280872783051768,0.14895256842501844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15145169391413654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624653500722376,0.0,0.0,0.23002440838629826,0.08447604185656582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14151891610345074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544927288788662,0.22998533782577804,0.11620759860107994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329283323394072
mentalhealth,beamandu,2020/02/26,"HELP. I don't know what's happening to me. I feel lost. I just want to have someone to talk to that could help me with whatever this is. I was fine for 3/4 of the year last year. Then comes September, I felt overwhelmed with everything. Highly insecure, sensitive, I don't seem to enjoy the things that I used to enjoy. And I think it's taking a toll in my relationship. I cried myself to sleep since last month. I just need-- HELP.",0.7690282131661412,3.2342501034482787,2.278453500522467,92.81416927899687,88.19540229885058,6.382027168234067,18.25391849529781,7.686295010490155,0.6022275862068964,337,9,73,7,11,109,59,87,0.15,0.6920000000000001,0.157,-0.0984,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,2,6,0,2,3,0,6,1,1,1,0,15,18,2,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,2,14,3,12,14,0,9,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,1,6,45,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17210183526192424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15951646657700413,0.0,0.2194604957817037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795588294467118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102008580346676,0.0,0.19183022267207464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17667408977376314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4017461059855408,0.21108964498571287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979964031655674,0.3257118656162851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21809494459193512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15947088041270185,0.0,0.0,0.14814213296945586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145002401703056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188177834340466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16526877594599035,0.0,0.1999347981265279,0.0,0.16928185231043835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15021760064384568,0.16058404546141414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13273193844924885,0.12801769277945596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17255485486738384,0.0,0.0,0.1178416202581919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573170784305961
mentalhealth,singing_queenie_gwa,2020/02/26,"Suggest some mental health organization where donation funds will be optimized? Hiii!

The past few weeks, I had some activities conducted to obtain donation funds for mental health!

I’m 9 years bulimic already. Last depression relapse has been so hard where I almost wanted to end things. Fortunately, I pulled through though there are still signs for relapse. 

Anyway, I was able to accumulate $1k in 2 weeks which I would 100% put up for donation. I don’t want anyone to suffer to pain that I did so any organization you can suggest is appreciated and will be considered. 

Thank you so much!!! 💝",4.916915887850465,7.646075691588784,6.007299065420567,71.05113551401871,72.45794392523366,9.513644859813084,29.39158878504673,9.888512548439397,3.4558157009345787,477,20,79,14,10,158,78,107,0.12300000000000001,0.784,0.092,-0.6635,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,1,9,4,0,0,1,0,14,3,0,0,0,8,18,5,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,1,3,0,0,4,1,9,1,11,9,4,13,0,2,0,0,4,4,0,3,7,52,12,0,0.1920307042805155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19229101155917366,0.0,0.21191065731950848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058746392418774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427233336920474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653957642114606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700822062597871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202179236105158,0.0,0.0,0.40823931777924577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15653065398530114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870435676221784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14116466298220168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043342085258039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833150359628554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930438970383363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533559684945928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767960723627141,0.0,0.0,0.12757666713115198,0.0,0.18866919196246668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265293694572732,0.0,0.3080708957206155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641310269081147,0.0,0.0,0.12366147758270185
mentalhealth,ForeignTemporary9,2020/02/26,"No personality? Is there a disorder like that? Where you have just no personality?

​

Im 27 and completely lost.   


At age 15 everything went downhill, lost friends, big anxiety etc. Bad grades etc etc. 

since then i have had no development. I have no friends nothing. I have no real likes and dislikes.   
i love only a few things. I like my hobbies. But outside of this nothing. I cant work because in the interview they see that i have nothing inside. Which Is correct. It is empty in here.   


i studied for the sake of studying. I get a job for the sake of getting a job.   


i cant study a proper degree like engineering or comp science because it requires more executive function than i have. I always do stuff in the moment. 

​

i love fixing stufff just around the house or bikes computers etc. But i have high IQ so im supposed to get a “real job” and sit in an office (Tested btw Not trying to prove anything). I wish high iq person could just fix bikes all day and not ve looked at like ur insane.   


idk im completely fucking lost. Inhavent enjoyed anything involving other people in forever. I like some of my hobbies thats it. Music saves people. I believein music also. 

​

i dont want medication or be told how i shoukd be. I just need to know if there is a pathway forward - indont care if that means i have to work in the woods as long as i ever get to feel sonething real ever again. None of my feelings are real with other people anymore. By myself in reall. Around others im just a virtual entiity.",1.6618686868686865,4.2906428552188585,3.5594865319865328,84.23700757575759,85.0942760942761,5.58956228956229,25.421717171717173,7.054809383877858,1.4389454545454554,1196,51,218,17,36,401,163,297,0.11900000000000001,0.7509999999999999,0.13,0.8556,3,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,1,1,6,17,18,1,0,15,0,21,4,0,1,5,42,43,17,0,6,14,0,2,6,2,0,1,0,0,3,14,7,0,1,5,2,0,2,11,5,0,0,6,4,28,13,28,34,9,26,0,3,2,3,13,16,1,6,15,149,42,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056516661886066785,0.0588050661376523,0.22972042218222696,0.25762396376443264,0.0,0.0,0.054064163039613616,0.0,0.07008799228835796,0.0,0.0,0.11631466352937253,0.12582677013059096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900846979053975,0.08616243111634493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720551825231087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819725268012435,0.0,0.0,0.056426129923209736,0.0,0.0,0.04557782653063122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099664894169836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282748123181298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31527345746719043,0.0,0.12785439392813305,0.0,0.0,0.06351576145481284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146813879115785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920258222942833,0.06533545932395053,0.14769356776955048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493384600223478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154641641384781,0.0,0.0,0.30535311104206125,0.0,0.2103942413244209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03883968158881525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20716167591532408,0.0,0.0,0.06254281591801161,0.059346984295049164,0.0,0.2314416926957025,0.0,0.12756913081081747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698291988778347,0.0,0.07119496901069873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0524026604990069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034361104500263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05374951547060229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698595076383147,0.18512514006852146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217624777324629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05631672206200476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584609076660845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809029455997081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046951576627867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675304699244221,0.0,0.04798189434150402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0416843898171504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551398706282556,0.0,0.0,0.08126972783369522,0.0,0.0,0.10290064161995732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25762396376443264,0.0
mentalhealth,itsxthexslim,2020/02/26,Does anyone consider personal days and mental health the same? Just curious if anyone considers personal days from work and mental health days the same. I personally don't but was wondering?,7.011770833333332,10.27340746875,7.376250000000002,61.17708333333337,68.0625,13.016666666666666,32.541666666666664,11.855464076750405,5.832529166666667,157,7,21,7,3,51,23,32,0.0,0.935,0.065,0.2523,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,8,3,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,13,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28777839834172203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3981416364017923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18008326759452756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4374782729350152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4147644387489359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.539048859328245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22316434463535406,0.1498134544796338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,laszlo434,2020/02/26,"I'm obsessed with Russia. I know Russian history better than my nation's, and I speak Russian fluently. I spend my days listening to Russian music. I only watch Russian movies and I don't remember the last time I've read a fiction book that isn't Russian or in Russian. I have to post at least five Russia related threads a day on 4chan, and I'm planning to do my master's studies in Russia. I also spend my free time translating books from Russian to Hungarian.

But at the same time, I acknowledge that Russia is a shithole, and I sort of hate it but I can't stop obsessing over it. I've lost interest in everything that isn't Russian or related to Russia and literally don't have anything to talk about with people who are not interested in Russia. 

How do I stop being obsessed with Russia?",4.833024475524474,6.046922314102567,6.3550116550116575,74.75968531468533,69.44871794871796,9.262470862470863,33.412587412587406,9.573946990214177,3.379276923076924,635,30,112,14,11,217,84,156,0.08,0.816,0.10400000000000001,0.5551,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,4,3,9,1,3,5,0,12,0,0,1,0,21,18,11,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,8,0,2,3,3,3,0,6,5,0,1,1,3,15,5,21,16,2,18,0,1,1,0,4,9,0,3,8,74,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861010658033932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915035507140931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20581636078505125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001621755882136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091480725787319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297566048105147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278933662733699,0.18969272945134044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540344991172133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17698925912609645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16133438165201694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228754013708603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327766806235975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26361926292812765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3891181552032056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18704646103252529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4070916984412116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrP0tatoe,2020/02/26,"I wish I could cry. I’m in so much pain all day, every day. I seem to be unable to express negative emotions, though. If I’m stressed out, I smile.

When people cry, others shower them with care and love but when I’m in pain, I look normal and I don’t get the support I need. I wish I could just cry and have someone wrap there arms around me and tell me it’s ok.",-0.1216249999999981,1.5994520875000011,1.8800000000000023,99.395,84.375,4.5,17.5,5.148860815047168,-0.8087499999999999,277,6,69,1,8,92,54,80,0.217,0.58,0.203,-0.3086,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,7,7,0,1,1,1,5,4,1,0,1,18,17,10,0,7,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,12,4,7,14,2,8,0,0,1,1,4,4,0,2,4,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273471939437152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16347516903870224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25603352331910856,0.0,0.5283709434839771,0.20680935459769426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803585500196993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509159113168112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376993198689431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464344894912916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471120947289615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11786680090924904,0.11888851687254445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570970933012705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34122164805928085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115810737474503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14596559695712394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585377739076207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18366651601497605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819495421828389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401423866592544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15753116691500013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687613306948977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lord_mcdonalds_,2020/02/26,"I now feel like I suffered from some kind of depression 2 years back don't know how to feel about it now!! First thing I live in a third world country and there is very very less awareness about the mental heath issues. Even so that I actually don't have any therapist in the town that I live in right now and there are about 5-6 mental health clinics in the whole country all in the biggest city. 

Almost 3 years ago, I moved into a bigger city for my further studies. I was around 16 then, and that was my first experience living away from my parents. Until then I lived in a small town where we all knew each other and there was so much bonding with each other. I normally knew most of the people on my 10 min walk to the school. As you can guess I was not prepared for the dreaded lifestyle of the big cities and it very hard for me to adjust to the lifestyle. And also I really couldn't connect with anyone properly. And grew up to be socially awkward and introverted. I lived in a hostel and the first year was very tough. There were not many people who I could talk to and I only enjoyed my time at college where I had 2-3 friends. The rest of the time at hostel just felt so lonely and sad. I just tucked myself in a blanket and watched movies nonstop or studied. I usually went up days with not talking to anyone even my roommates.  I always felt tired and not well rested. 

And the people in the hostel were so keen on proving everyone that they were the supreme beings and everyone else was a lowlife. I never really got into that. So, I basically avoided them for a year. I turned from a happy and cheerful guy to a person filled with void and negative thoughts. It affected my studies and my health as well. I looked like I was sick for months. I did also start to hate myself for it and also hate everyone else.   
The next year I switched the hostel and found really amazing friends who did enjoy my presence and I did theirs too. I slowly started to heal myself and started to be a bit more positive. 

Now I look at myself and compare it to the one who was happy and cheerful. We are miles apart. But I am beginning to embrace myself. I have become a lot more introverted and calm. I do tend to overthink sometimes but I just talk to my friends or girlfriend. And I am not really sure how to look upon that time. I never met any therapist so I do not know if that was depression. And if it was not for that time would I be who I am today? And was it just so easy to recover from being in such a dark place? I do wonder about those things and find no answers?",3.555361801319247,4.883907499032883,4.552533849129592,86.03428904428905,72.65570599613153,7.236800079353273,26.215791300897685,7.702957570686157,1.3774098993205377,2015,67,408,25,39,656,231,517,0.09300000000000001,0.8220000000000001,0.084,0.4109,1,3,0,0,0,0,41.0,2,1,3,3,38,30,2,3,30,0,40,6,0,3,6,90,66,52,0,6,17,1,5,2,4,1,6,0,0,2,24,40,0,1,15,0,0,5,14,11,2,5,27,9,60,19,65,31,15,74,0,5,4,0,22,36,0,10,35,319,84,2,0.0,0.0,0.07079167031475565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06430514399344353,0.0,0.0726415068114459,0.0,0.0,0.17403824266544812,0.060361729496421615,0.0,0.0,0.09866368763907807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144774360424336,0.0,0.0,0.0645788021414032,0.0,0.0,0.06815669703047576,0.055781220595110384,0.0,0.0,0.08011823282541795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919835410018054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057919819067662165,0.0,0.0,0.046784343880114286,0.0,0.12496265358564475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212010214918408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582816040966284,0.0,0.0,0.20795432567675745,0.0,0.07096114107788266,0.0,0.0,0.0733600137652496,0.051824855781791225,0.1393056406939951,0.0,0.06630314396715807,0.18511555231231666,0.0,0.07953984254870328,0.1681400216457605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058019400709054175,0.0,0.0799144813296168,0.071829144406566,0.0,0.15444710870380315,0.06498443219051397,0.1432427251983807,0.0,0.15421999677834836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571622310628849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554254924264807,0.07973565911152329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708818580038382,0.0,0.32028474476141283,0.0,0.1827539792605949,0.0,0.0,0.061673609726103376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354738918605082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14621290785139396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057903266905712764,0.07710191016759779,0.05332757753162831,0.0,0.11189953107682486,0.0,0.07715048523055605,0.0,0.07107690510296658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04915713003008446,0.05517235038568995,0.0,0.0,0.08055060637278835,0.0,0.0,0.15087690198344794,0.06334189870447432,0.07579217355781381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858920513960996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06195147157469096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341756184021797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394862714994309,0.0,0.0,0.07174705093866733,0.0,0.1540392892101857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683710800548364,0.0,0.0,0.1749223586354032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684564253456813,0.09638891864206872,0.0,0.0,0.0575911745393556,0.16920202530107453,0.08337770341160712,0.06876244375758687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890613863722172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989605391822667,0.2394228532934427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304500454373619,0.06724824619806508,0.0,0.08099185963764477,0.0,0.0,0.07866997435051792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05153258723814908,0.0,0.0,0.2335771181736432
mentalhealth,urimisu,2020/02/26,"I just had an awful visit with a new psychiatrist and I dont know how to feel about it. I'm here because I need to vent and to be honestly I dont really know who else to talk to, hopefully this is the right place. Sorry this is a little all over the place. A little background, i have anxiety and depression (along with a few other health issues, the one relavant to the story being issues with my joints popping out of place, specifically my knee, but also several other non weight bearing joints. My otho, psyical therapist, and old primary care doctor narrowed it down to more likely than not being a connective tissue disorder, along with my skeletal structure being a little weird) and I've been on basically the same meds since I was 14, over time things have been added and the doses increased, but ive been on a fairly stable medication plan that at the very least keeps me functional. Its definatly not perfect and I still struggle to function sometimes but on my meds I can get out of bed, out of the house, and interact with other people. My insurance recently began requiring we use their in house medication service for meds or they wont cover it, which means I can't pick up my final 9 months of pills from my old doctor (I moved semi recently and never got around to finding someone to repercribe my anti depressants/anxiety meds.)

 I found a doctor who had an opening like 5 days after I called and was super close to my house. I was thrilled. I went into the appointment open to changing meds if I needed to, simply because I was still really struggling with symptoms of anxiety and depression. I get in do all the new patient stuff. I sit down with the doctor, he confirms my name, looks at my chart and says ""did you know zoloft causes weight gain?"" I wasnt particularly shocked by the sudden left turn of the conversation to weight,, (i am definatly overweight, and I'm working hard to get more exersize and eat better. It's something I'm very sensitive about and something that has kept me away from doctors for a long time, when I was in middle school I developed an eating disorder after my pediatrician refused to send me to physical therapy for my constantly dislocation knee until I lost weight, so that's what I did. I developed some very problematic eating habits. I got through that, after getting treatment, and joining a very demanding sport that required me to eat a better diet so I could function. I also wasnt to suprised that zoloft causes weight gain, although the initial prescribing doctor didnt tell me that (likely because I was 14 and at the time had recently been treated for an eating disorder)). So I simply said that I had suspected that, and that my weight was something I had struggled with, and was currently actively working to change. I tried to convey in that, that it wasnt something I was interested in discussing, but apparently I didnt do a very good job of that. 

He drops it and continues asking general questions about my mental health, and general health, he asks if I've ever had surgery, I say that yes, I've had two surgeries to correct a dislocating knee cap, figuring this isnt particularly relavant and we will move on. But no, he begins on a tangent about how I am far to young to have had two knee surgeries, and that the doctors were wrong to have done surgery on me. He then goes on to explain that his daughter had a dislocating knee cap too, and that the only thing that she needed to fix it was physical therapy and to loose weight, and that all the issues I have with my knee can be solved the same way. During the rant I manage to cut in and quickly explain that surgery had been decided after I had lost significant amounts of weight and done 6 years of physical therapy. He dismissed what I've said, tells me he knows women are sensitive about their weight and reiterates that all of my problems will be solved if loose weight. 

He continues, saying that hes going to cut my zoloft in half to help me loose weight, and double my dose of welbutrin. Now like I said in the begining, I went in open to changing my meds, but in the past zoloft has been the most impactful on helping with my depression and anxiety, and although a small dose of welbutrin is helpful for getting me motivated and doing things, when I was on a higher dose I found it made me very jittery and increased my anxiety. I tried to tell the doctor this, but he dismissed me saying that a higher dose of wellbutrin would probably help me loose weight, and give me some extra pep.  Honestly I just kind of quietly nodded and left. 

At this point I kind of feel like I'm being punished for being over weight, like I dont deserve the privilege of being mentally stable because of it. Part of me knows that's not what's happening, and I'm trying to believe that this guy knows what hes doing, and is trying to help. And who knows maybe the med switch will overall be a good thing, maybe hes right and this is what I need but I honestly have my doubts. The entire experience was pretty horrific. I know I need to find a new psychiatrist because this guy made me incredibly uncomfortable, but honestly the whole process was so overwhelming that part of me just is too exhausted to go through it again, I'm going to give the meds a chance, see what happens. I have a friend who I'm fairly sure sees the same psychiatrist so I'll probably talk to him and see if this is how he is, or if it was just a weird interaction. I think that regardless I need to find someone else, because I just didnt click with him, and part of me knows that it's important to find someone I am able to talk to and feel heard, but also the idea of calling the office and being like ""hey I didnt like the dr I saw, do you have anyone better"" is deeply uncomfortable to me. 

If you have advice I'm open to it (I live in the us) I just cant tell if I am being overly sensitive about it, or not, maybe I am over reacting. I cant tell anymore.",8.504080808080808,6.834195045887448,8.628030303030304,71.29982323232326,62.17748917748918,11.914862914862914,37.406204906204906,10.785664104667894,3.9038109668109673,4718,185,883,97,54,1554,406,1155,0.114,0.779,0.107,-0.368,4,0,4,0,0,0,112.0,3,3,3,15,35,48,3,5,61,2,105,53,7,11,9,172,177,81,0,18,30,1,17,8,1,5,27,9,1,3,71,69,20,5,28,1,0,11,21,19,0,4,60,32,123,29,140,99,23,113,0,6,6,0,74,58,0,16,49,621,194,17,0.032282896100451916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03154647244116289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744986104412686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348163577336685,0.0,0.032015958258694285,0.02257295156815765,0.0,0.0,0.0287386219008336,0.060360299966568914,0.0,0.03033084357433005,0.0,0.0,0.1180761229429625,0.0,0.0,0.036371768917176237,0.0,0.08565479447737508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592889272545513,0.0,0.03291456411665025,0.06632685405633232,0.10245307054504234,0.0,0.0,0.03488634197563767,0.0,0.025775265653047108,0.0,0.0,0.020819797287431833,0.0,0.08341563332018456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109969873702149,0.2643432968179839,0.0,0.06607322218577394,0.11350594139779585,0.0,0.0,0.16516731072304552,0.05393643448235592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029201727753540588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031578866988328916,0.0,0.0,0.048969606782651776,0.02306290742459049,0.0,0.035364334702550085,0.11802392872735247,0.0,0.0,0.07079305856599315,0.024941685446022915,0.0,0.08433240392543326,0.06193739117783969,0.055041341440558215,0.05415472319485562,0.05163916222042934,0.0,0.0,0.06393028529828422,0.057095316811455986,0.0,0.028919133898988755,0.0,0.0,0.1029456268155029,0.0,0.0,0.10819272380944407,0.0,0.0,0.032064200023916065,0.0,0.11175038314596672,0.0,0.036443460209791466,0.0,0.10108486850744976,0.03203579304711228,0.028694521363558264,0.0,0.06723533692544872,0.15967651883524325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015092214324033,0.0,0.0,0.12617433890089927,0.09706782874128957,0.02850638870677337,0.02856934716540405,0.02710950206923375,0.0,0.07048118924738153,0.0,0.0,0.061093713716040075,0.0,0.0,0.09729752474717823,0.035165537908682265,0.28687215927705995,0.0650432429765628,0.06506713250211632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02576789967058644,0.06862321909554342,0.0,0.14362415042036347,0.024898559650084383,0.09353706666382493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06775093777955772,0.0,0.02187572588558414,0.02455259720740621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487769159459058,0.030817677213715942,0.02238089536035499,0.0,0.10118626608237552,0.0,0.030517771569101317,0.0,0.0,0.03284331124480622,0.06961284428757147,0.03089037166778117,0.0,0.0,0.03616423192036043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04136249978549658,0.0,0.09562639578477472,0.0,0.0,0.055138833758076836,0.09212528070105187,0.10269061887860273,0.0,0.03267201435522397,0.07717586553423618,0.0,0.0,0.036470483632468166,0.0,0.02670474525653719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820595793118661,0.09941180247092453,0.0319286097148628,0.036138059144823764,0.0,0.0,0.05156232505467564,0.0,0.0,0.10124727711723916,0.036956192419795066,0.0,0.0,0.030426247522293774,0.03355428994851758,0.0,0.07784330709351926,0.14108337059019566,0.0,0.1107549155194794,0.03748293057662424,0.08578928677615248,0.020685576294957448,0.0,0.0,0.05647324898504075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767186938900758,0.03511452069031208,0.06307139720374334,0.0,0.038832349120686685,0.02788205706514177,0.0,0.15982062132755814,0.0,0.025624660279413083,0.0,0.5110543150375616,0.0,0.05985313622722981,0.0,0.03604270060747033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047004665697131735,0.0,0.0,0.022932843148222408,0.035296279031912146,0.0,0.020789126652366253
mentalhealth,desions99,2020/02/26,"This is my first time opening up, I need someone to talk to please.. Okay so let me start out by saying this all started when I was like 7 or 8 years old. I am a 21 year old male. I ""had"" a best friend named ""Jim"" not the real name, he was around the preteen age or a little older. This is something I've never ever told anyone including my best friends currently. But I can't stand it anymore more, I feel if people are starting to look at me different or like I'm gay or something but I'm not. Not saying their is anything wrong with that but I'm not. Ive had one past relationship that started to get serious with a girl I known for awhile. but I couldn't really perform property in bed cuz of this.. It makes my anxiety go crazy thinking about any real sexual contact at all. I start over thinking things and shaking, bring up past experiences that happened when I was younger. My ""friend"" jim screwed my hole life up and I legitimately hope he rots in hell for this. I can't even tell I'm mom or dad why I don't have a girlfriend yet to bring home to the family. I think they are starting to think things too, like I'm playing for the other ""team"" but love me either way. I'm not though they would probably cry their self to sleep if they knew the truth. I feel ashamed about it but know I shouldn't. But that's not even the main point, the main point is, am I ever gonna find a girl that I can open up too, to explain this cuz I don't think I ever will, and I feel if I do it will back fire one day and come up to haunt me even worse than it has already. I couldn't even try to get a girlfriend in highschool cuz of this. now I'm getting older and I'm going to be looked at as even more weird the longer I wait but I can't do anything cuz of my thoughts and actions to the situations. When a girl does come on to me I can't get in the mood cuz I'm having horrible flash back kind of thoughts. I don't think I can be completely normal in her eyes. But if I am normal in her eyes if we fight or break up will this be spread or thrown in my face?... 
I really really need help before it's to late. But this is not a feel bad for me kind of post. It's my first Reddit post. I won't someone to talk to about this please.. I wanna move on but feel as if I'm in the same place as kid. Where shame over takes pride. I am so sorry about the grammar, its my weakest subject.",1.4070268056250868,2.800984342465753,3.0152969553542985,94.61059664133256,78.37377690802349,6.1624903290401845,21.472762026122968,6.8252276405021135,0.2216058890456467,1833,49,440,18,43,605,226,511,0.124,0.7909999999999999,0.085,-0.9754,2,0,2,0,1,0,53.0,1,0,5,7,26,27,3,3,21,1,43,8,4,6,7,94,97,44,0,16,32,2,6,3,5,7,1,2,2,6,26,15,0,1,18,2,0,9,19,10,0,4,9,12,57,16,61,75,10,76,1,0,4,3,38,30,2,14,35,285,83,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049917226897647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04960667333852958,0.0,0.05580449368663462,0.0,0.07234413155159278,0.05100645636027666,0.0,0.12005884381918452,0.06493857302680599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218395965934344,0.06090795815097259,0.0,0.0,0.062072789323986424,0.0,0.15310740600564812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256752994449298,0.0764838683020487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012919641944204,0.04704498118310858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621441454840683,0.0,0.0,0.06383668393948802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409050565525151,0.19795505888650816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135646820858542,0.06876823320514744,0.0,0.1844217627601323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667252122438595,0.12409789191515345,0.0,0.0,0.16907673589955985,0.0,0.15244783802744544,0.0,0.08291527647509024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450706671049199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04889504528305055,0.0,0.07317210126645952,0.07245313995862797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15192679913397347,0.040089934702694494,0.0,0.08228774481390914,0.0,0.0,0.07459356841344013,0.05152484347125793,0.10691511516842277,0.07311237014102022,0.0,0.0,0.1225147389403679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658377967464842,0.0,0.04869289691914184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543500966843211,0.0,0.0775314477490863,0.0,0.10817901443649493,0.05626146374306104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294575431863416,0.0,0.0,0.1530918648713904,0.0,0.09886197242423723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392729261107248,0.050572480920581614,0.0,0.07621441454840683,0.16014848487796854,0.1379175761798088,0.0,0.1397267199722631,0.0,0.07864953977213865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16606002153460378,0.14019574714613256,0.0,0.0,0.07831811285854592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160212601047271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609995518659253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199583457892268,0.0729999932475213,0.0,0.12361604074313726,0.11231680866188802,0.0,0.0816585430199456,0.30979489552840994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05484729989683873,0.11726457169226005,0.06375916559641019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692590485817944,0.2804501506300893,0.07167036324527988,0.1158240341880151,0.042536164004088765,0.0,0.0,0.06970428229493987,0.0,0.049526436169765715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057902180507600966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582360246479406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433954255454854,0.05181967717978612,0.07975643374263061,0.0,0.0939513539609946
mentalhealth,MorgenWaddelGreenluc,2020/02/26,"I'm mentally ready to leave, anyone else? I drive faster than I need to, I go from not eating frequently to eating unhealthy food, I don't go to class... I've already checked out in my head that I'm going to die and I'm waiting for it to happen now because I'm too scared to do it myself. Am I the only one?",1.7857352941176463,2.5166708088235303,4.11694117647059,89.76923529411766,76.20588235294117,6.616470588235294,23.894117647058824,6.742157984588678,0.6583317647058831,237,7,55,2,5,83,46,68,0.177,0.785,0.038,-0.8504,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,5,13,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,3,1,0,0,1,4,2,1,0,1,0,0,7,0,12,13,0,9,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,31,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24661936677270824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156264711975667,0.22898503970397005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623333873119056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23194037061241826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4573583948027536,0.1866916112837716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27023688025737097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810321100894989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19762553447568088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293583295348192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366365347047105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252185915702036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571002711232755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514380604790555,0.16996911189417133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22374575935215507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,laurenaii,2020/02/26,"I keep googling the same questions and sentences up I think there is something seriously wrong with me. Whenever I start feeling overwhelmed or any symptom of my mental health further deteriorating, I go straight to google and search up the same questions and sentences that I did a day or two before..? I don’t know why I keep doing it either and I feel crazy and idk if it’s normal but I just recently realized.

An example is if I’m feeling really overwhelmed and suicidal I’ll continuously search up why I’m feeling that way looking for answers I have already found..? 

If my memory is failing that day I’ll search up a bunch of similar searches to memory problems and stuff like that even though I have searched it up before?

I have no idea why I keep doing this but I will end up doing this for 2-3 hours until I am satisfied and whenever I have my next mental breakdown or feel like something is wrong with me I will do it again . 

I’m at a loss to why I do this.",4.7598644878437595,5.6342777564766875,5.912953367875647,79.11226783579117,69.36269430051814,8.840015942606618,32.462734157034674,9.057496981413335,2.7712665603826228,769,34,149,14,13,257,99,193,0.161,0.732,0.107,-0.9467,0,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,5,10,0,2,6,0,18,2,0,0,0,40,35,18,1,5,10,0,5,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,12,10,0,3,13,0,0,1,2,8,0,1,2,6,23,2,17,31,4,21,0,4,1,0,2,9,0,8,12,103,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281348283065528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184475531895423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048245492906601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15523657261353696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659780148209018,0.0,0.0,0.07949259275697226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042726518988273,0.08598082521336474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196180088708456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839987504298503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279305305087193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185243135982156,0.0,0.0,0.13586486407725454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32092813544974,0.0,0.0,0.06614333668584077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175976382739469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010669347157354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24257677680456824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799770082650958,0.0,0.11792123416795465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11516239467325212,0.0,0.0,0.2696477461817941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710176776438597,0.0,0.11883492210220535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853085704902159,0.0,0.0,0.08518708511438106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377763810303416,0.13164759410184332,0.0,0.0,0.1250937484207188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07711789702447013,0.1182470613056508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756823801745908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553129603628832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4344025733133646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631761158516531,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,daxtov96tlml,2020/02/26,"I always feel worthless and like a waste, despite my situation A little bit of background: I have been diagnosed with bipolar 2 and ADHD for 7 years and have many struggles with that, but recently, things are a different kind of bad.

Objectively, I can look at my life and see things are improving. At age 25, I have $50000 saved and no debt, a wonderful, supportive fiance, a good support system of friends, and I've repaired my relationship with my parents and finally feel a sense of support from them. Despite that, I consistently feel worse every time I should feel better. 

I recently left my job. I hated the work and wasn't passionate about it (I was in management, while i am an introverted, analytical person). My mental health was deteriorating quickly at that job and my fiance helped me build up the courage to quit. Before that, I had already decided I was going back to school to pursue my masters in applied statistics starting fall 2020. This was as of December 6, 2019. Immediately after leaving, I went to see my psychiatrist for the first time in over a year, and have since been put on adderall and depakote.   Since then, I am always either sad or stressed.

I feel ashamed that I don't have a job, despite the fact I'm preparing for grad school, and my fiance encourages me to relax as we have savings and she makes enough to cover bills.

I feel stressed at the thought of taking Student loans, despite the real possibility of getting a scholarship or Assistantship, and the fact that my savings could cover all of the loans if I wanted to go that route 

I feel sad that I can't find the motivation to do anything most days, despite the time I have right now.

I'm frustrated I can't get myself to be reasonable and even try to see my situation for what it actually is.

Worst of all, I'm just so upset that I always live my life thinking I'm just a disappointment to everyone I care about.


I dont know why I even posted this, really. Maybe part I just needed to get it out, but maybe part advice too. Could this just be wrong meds?
Does anyone else have these nagging feelings where they just can't be satisfied with themselves, and how did you begin to cope?",7.59087842278204,7.085226520481932,7.945613362541074,71.69467415115007,63.31325301204818,11.015334063526835,35.972070098576125,10.436869588844218,3.6787108433734943,1726,71,317,36,22,569,221,415,0.177,0.71,0.113,-0.9845,6,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,1,1,2,6,16,31,3,5,21,0,35,6,0,4,4,65,72,27,0,6,11,1,8,1,1,1,5,0,0,1,19,22,0,0,16,1,5,5,7,15,0,1,11,12,48,16,47,55,9,41,0,4,4,1,11,15,0,5,20,217,67,11,0.0,0.0,0.07893958087155029,0.0,0.09721727426492867,0.07904738477217414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926707723307774,0.0,0.20192755472261645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056562038477669926,0.08288410392081065,0.06656777816243148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622014730646026,0.06754200386315436,0.0,0.0,0.06883370750872086,0.0,0.0,0.07154299643975211,0.08831384893996135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08247547231120267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12917243571251813,0.0,0.0,0.05216908261701112,0.0,0.0,0.08210436128688825,0.0,0.08451562715494416,0.0,0.0,0.0707897241041073,0.0,0.09480561141802972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757544916817304,0.0,0.0,0.08358375617026115,0.0,0.10685769646056392,0.0,0.06815556667948455,0.07729641654336188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272141320362601,0.0,0.0,0.08861397031500802,0.07393443850049354,0.0688072671420587,0.0,0.0,0.062497479234658634,0.0,0.12678925025844304,0.0,0.0919463415620284,0.06784893698651104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798647682685198,0.0,0.08598512970216722,0.0,0.0,0.05422065420763367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24082049086786664,0.0,0.0,0.08423727182405684,0.04445649807946746,0.0,0.0,0.08565366173825936,0.08789012694084815,0.0,0.11427377578995584,0.03952007444761082,0.08107571057084116,0.07142971312473023,0.0,0.06792947278164127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053996488006852326,0.08201247478311717,0.16253512740428647,0.0,0.0898535248160153,0.0,0.08152078918664712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05998089275026285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982174142445344,0.1751977659194111,0.0,0.0,0.07063236272159508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119433553662716,0.07747282084846728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131948003121528,0.0,0.0860393160271679,0.0,0.09207357262087602,0.05182191831085428,0.08317114148153477,0.15974351313127153,0.08684845858951848,0.0,0.06908190156748592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637354093923652,0.1933829637969327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338305116347628,0.18185350959113467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057256250977638035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853245694152117,0.08456658650026355,0.0,0.0,0.27538814334764233,0.0,0.0,0.06082122359665267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748299629654144,0.05183275916733178,0.0,0.06421974732088535,0.1415075061143905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492081568085152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04771259495555632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07498831918528104,0.07299305619380486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772465425372314,0.05889083006631756,0.0,0.08243654561459418,0.0,0.08844344022506281,0.0,0.1041844597130162
mentalhealth,Unkindled-knight,2020/02/26,"I got r*ped by one of best friends Hi, I'm a 21 yo male and about half a week ago I got r*aped by a (female) friend. I don't want to go into details but I just need to vent a few things and since I closed all my social media I don't have access to any support groups but the one's here in reddit, plus the anonymity makes me feel safer.
So far, only my mother, sister and one friend know, and I guess the girl who did it too. My family has been pressuring me to open up and go to therapy but I just don't feel ready yet, and everytime they begin to insist I just completely block and seek isolation, but they won't stop.
My mom even went as far as to schedule an appointment with my therapist without my concent, which made me really angry and I immediately told her to cancel it.
I have barely spoken more than a few words in days, this here is the most open I've been about it since it happened, and I have been feeling suicidal, anxious and empty. I can't stop thinking about it 24/7.

My biggest fear is catching HIV or AIDS, as this ""friend"" has a very active sexual life, and my city has the highest amount of HIV cases in the whole state.
In my colleague alone there have been 400 reported cases of HIV in the last 2 years.
I'm set on the idea that if I test postive I will kill myself, I have thought about it, and I don't want to live like that, I'd rather die.
I am very afraid, but I just can't open up to anyone in my life right now, I can't even let my own mother hug me. I used to be very affectionate and wouldn't go a day without hugging someone, now I don't think I can ever go back to that, I don't feel it in me anymore.
I died that day, every day since just feels like a dream I can't wake up from.",4.779755434782608,3.8257622472826114,5.758826086956521,86.5470434782609,69.19021739130434,8.881739130434784,27.09565217391304,7.908726449838941,1.3019419565217394,1329,32,311,14,20,442,191,368,0.156,0.726,0.11800000000000001,-0.9574,0,2,0,0,0,1,41.0,0,0,2,1,22,15,1,3,17,0,32,8,1,3,2,60,61,25,4,6,15,4,5,2,4,3,5,0,0,2,16,20,0,3,10,1,0,6,14,4,0,4,11,5,46,11,42,45,9,45,0,0,0,5,18,20,0,4,19,203,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759690528875162,0.0,0.0,0.10234647633137564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720017377179413,0.0,0.0,0.11163711822534833,0.0980016978453704,0.06909640377420287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598555875808383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037042357095212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360963343705316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549198079880267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051166292984876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13053777303191172,0.08938726358715479,0.08325910242086583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315757155954756,0.11119862513284562,0.2498287764673726,0.07059617165282515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053886441361318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22464400906055906,0.0,0.1580688459181223,0.0,0.10886005096176894,0.0,0.08738513995629825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155439881140762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109328362816341,0.0,0.05430822905894146,0.08055051252493522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104891987885058,0.13959728406717056,0.09655574992392553,0.0,0.08725881231261379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935047394719945,0.06596231745048077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573538617947016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327288930446718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20088653237217813,0.07515615161029514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330585474521343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439071668326094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452318017023315,0.0,0.0,0.10073332375007553,0.08372884996974721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165233886006241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809173007856368,0.11213840507114996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300791184535787,0.11473624518896836,0.06565082085840096,0.12663819595437295,0.0,0.07845109035299351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442559977550384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534771658953423,0.0,0.24460758154176654,0.11657177905515705,0.0,0.07926648203565836,0.0,0.0,0.09160601916461256,0.0,0.11032766303364464,0.0,0.19051559689153155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06363606836915661
mentalhealth,yokuias,2020/02/26,"Looking for mental health resources in FL, does anyone have any advice? Looking for help getting in to see a psychiatrist for bipolar depressive disorder. I've been previously diagnosed and would like to start taking medicine again",8.701228070175437,11.57207894736842,7.67105263157895,62.62570175438599,62.15789473684211,10.329824561403509,41.614035087719294,10.504223727775694,5.478129824561403,192,11,24,5,3,59,33,38,0.125,0.753,0.122,-0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,2,9,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,7,7,0,4,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,3,13,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621908245381801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824609735124728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18760959073804734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310962419055969,0.27233045401860895,0.0,0.0,0.30750814473397703,0.0,0.2348011409255341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018164827611462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852025037844084,0.0,0.0,0.17984349608367206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310834119951411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4506280512731636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27039481439459506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138094716887801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899122114799726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20173680394599064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906007419768275,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Flame_angel52,2020/02/26,"Help for struggling person. I have been severely depressed. I have been questioning my relationships and if anyone cares enough to notice if I where to disappear or ask me if I’m doing alright. I’ve been questioning weather or not I can be happy, if I even deserve to be. I’ve been struggling with feelings of hopelessness and meaninglessness,....and I don’t know what to do. I’m slipping, loosing my grip on emotion. I don’t know what to do.",3.3874411764705883,5.7640114352941225,4.6572794117647085,80.59650735294119,75.82352941176471,7.544117647058822,30.625,8.472884824447931,2.6653823529411764,352,17,63,7,8,116,49,85,0.262,0.653,0.085,-0.9325,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,2,0,1,14,0,0,0,0,15,21,8,0,4,7,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,4,2,10,3,9,15,1,3,0,2,0,0,6,2,0,8,0,47,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463127631157459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19562090150102526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213344755031986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802270852244632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353785648190232,0.0,0.21621162613670133,0.0,0.13820793283025995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580330261533646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22275096938426334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025614968233874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299971234249156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382329968087299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827094007453444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4688167324729218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22465664764880225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363934205202179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4375079566131652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MoistBed0,2020/02/26,"2000$ for my life. Im am verry depressed I have had diagnosed depression for 5 years. I have lied to everybody and not said the truth. I have alsow been suicidal these past 5 years. But i haven’t admitted it to anyone yeet. I am lgbt. I know i wont get better. I have medication but that shit dosent help. Im afraid for my past, and all that shit that went down. That everybody in my new city will find out about my past. The thing that makes me suicidal. And i am so sacred. I was planning to kill myslef when everyone knew about my past and my life would be over. But im too scared of that. I want everyone to remember me as me and not my past. I want to rememberd as the person i am today and not my actions from the past. I really love my family. So i dont want them to suffer. My mome dide some years ago aswell. So if i die it would be dobble the burder on my dad. I really love him and hes the onlky reason im alive today. Aside from that. I recently got to know a dude through a friend that would be able to kill me and make it seem like a homicide. We would go on a mountain and he woud put me to sleep with a clouth with clorofm and aceton or something like that. It would only cost about 2000$ but idk if i sould go through it. What if my family finds out its a suicide. Im kinda lost. I really want to die more than anything. I know my life and myself good enouhf that i know there is no other soulution. Even if i move to another country my past will still exist. What can i do so i dont back out. Maby tak a drug before the kill so i dont think about anyone else than mysef. I have too much empathi and sympathi. Any tips. Should i go through with it or try a bit longer. Sorry this is really darjk",-0.2307671890798773,1.8647122554347848,2.112891809909001,95.15718402426695,88.13043478260867,5.705864509605662,16.7103134479272,7.121374137718711,-0.03714972194135546,1322,30,310,21,43,448,178,368,0.203,0.696,0.10099999999999999,-0.9934,0,0,2,0,0,3,38.0,1,0,1,3,16,19,5,2,15,0,33,11,3,3,2,60,57,30,8,14,13,1,0,2,1,9,6,1,0,1,23,19,0,0,12,0,1,7,9,11,0,0,8,1,52,8,39,37,5,33,0,4,0,2,13,8,2,9,20,203,75,0,0.06809376892718069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060361017611030264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046306097905315216,0.07140225392523508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522549298574554,0.06977011321521681,0.056035369861942234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05235990512748897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794278201396767,0.0,0.0,0.06022340503465429,0.0743407595369512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172981267964074,0.06911374209851301,0.1413411630535198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394161701401823,0.0,0.07896715361468315,0.0,0.056883606337074434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044975292168773065,0.0,0.0,0.13013302860856146,0.0,0.0,0.12838549030861082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447294235361185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05260907695924268,0.0,0.03557618379778344,0.0,0.11609777430851255,0.05711382268913461,0.05446080749524036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045641817956843314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677647769538478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260069991601519,0.0,0.14969021838590335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14428992829577436,0.0665343518973918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433239259870658,0.0,0.12291457003003738,0.0,0.0909062390313488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859730836631066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237290002717284,0.05005675513094866,0.0,0.0,0.06576538634900261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051788379691865886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4550224518808546,0.0,0.059456852528107174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845304539699439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744904480614264,0.07001173545834168,0.06723438192209799,0.0,0.07713696610755913,0.0,0.06477276756593173,0.0,0.06817374175014221,0.0,0.0,0.061990009808199936,0.0,0.0,0.13979455053999587,0.0,0.0,0.06814294543273781,0.0,0.0,0.052421910080698304,0.0,0.07622539939500565,0.0,0.0,0.05437977182555366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22345059342125168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04523847436105019,0.043631737622656507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290898618951033,0.0,0.0,0.04623119930917132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16065387664787764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631236059977748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418592987009731,0.0,0.0,0.1315504639415828
mentalhealth,Anonymous42005057272,2020/02/26,"How bad is it to have a little bit of blood in sperm Made an anonymous account for obvious reasons, but I figured out earlier that my sperm had a little bit of blood... I’m just not really sure what to say, if I should be concerned or not. I did a quick google search and first thing that popped up was prostate biopsy. I’m a 22 year old, I don’t work out, I eat kinda healthy, not eating something that would make me put on a ton of weight, have had no issues like this in the past. Any ideas or anything I should do?",3.6401179554390564,3.876530311926605,4.339737876802097,91.68321100917431,71.56880733944953,7.32948885976409,25.66317169069462,6.868970318607317,0.7800107470511142,400,11,93,3,7,128,79,109,0.075,0.8640000000000001,0.061,-0.1174,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,7,0,13,6,3,4,2,23,17,6,0,4,8,0,1,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,7,3,3,0,3,0,1,1,5,1,0,1,5,2,8,2,12,8,3,14,0,0,0,1,1,8,0,4,6,61,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530019236982315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162673904357685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384581064504455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40231899867466653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3770791550707261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15672780175707662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080022542536376,0.0,0.1923150765546036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001802644860482,0.3693452282424344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743471956355078,0.12299210852894678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19334535887675774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17589291177108446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852278672688399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803891764697665,0.18944554427827173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465275257514628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14184903748391872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365881386356075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241129778517268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22437380019504455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341403419044053,0.0,0.0,0.13088996060790475,0.0,0.0,0.11865462781974682
mentalhealth,MehWhatEvz,2020/02/26,"I always push people away...  I can't get myself to let in people into my life (social isolation problem). My anti-social childhood is now part of my personality and it seems impossible to change this behavior. I always feel like I can never be a person worthy of care, so I reject people that offer it.

My biggest conflicting mindset is I tend to think people offering me care ALWAYS have another person in their lives they will care more for, so I fear abandonment in a sense. I guess I abandon them before they have the chance to do that on me, avoiding potential emotional scarring.

I always destine myself to being alone because I am just completely blind to my self-worth, believing I am worthless regardless of the numerous people throughout my life time that suggested otherwise. And as a result I just end up suffering in silence because I have no one to talk to, kinda like a person suffering from quiet BPD.

Any advice on getting over fear of abandonment and healing a long-lived self-esteem wound?",9.393561561561564,8.408678362162169,9.648288288288287,62.50084084084085,59.972972972972975,12.330330330330332,38.933933933933936,11.429527900616536,4.77642942942943,807,34,122,19,9,270,115,185,0.239,0.672,0.08900000000000001,-0.9848,0,3,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,4,0,6,16,0,3,7,0,14,5,0,1,1,20,24,6,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,1,5,1,0,4,6,4,0,5,3,0,0,1,3,11,0,1,0,3,28,5,25,20,2,17,0,7,1,0,13,11,0,3,7,93,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073188768462411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137446860053323,0.0,0.0,0.3655299234266799,0.0,0.0,0.07468418004375617,0.11516018470366834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318339308038776,0.0,0.0,0.13389555065923242,0.0,0.09345225272524116,0.1237341955232091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831965755629722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3359190850391273,0.0,0.11617937611302,0.0,0.11514851946898275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353737361229368,0.09727158896293132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24716537693018145,0.05553038414800049,0.07845838631346662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147571588284678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098366997100946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230262217903317,0.15514407347065395,0.10730905304005477,0.0,0.09697672615089116,0.0971909063918299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470314586582957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441967835281017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189288394463143,0.0,0.38069114658799,0.3835768056400637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105086868236448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999797707614314,0.22914105590962486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11195187847139647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827248226516833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037087328963583,0.0,0.0,0.06403933819897367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sigma-Wolf,2020/02/26,"I’ve been experiencing depression symptoms for a couple of years now but it recently has gotten much worse and I think I may need to start getting help For a couple of years now I’ve been steadily getting more social anxiety, disinterest in doing things, and antisocial behavior. This past December my father passed away unexpectedly and as a result I just feel numb now. I’m studying abroad in an amazing city for the semester but have made extremely few friends and more often than not find myself just laying in my bed watching Netflix or playing video games. I can’t help but feel like everyone doesn’t like me and whenever I’m in public I’m constantly thinking about what other people are thinking of me which is extremely stressful. Sorry to rant, but I thought it was about time I started talking about this if even just on here.",7.767435897435894,8.122357282051281,7.811025641025642,69.93397435897437,62.71794871794872,10.77948717948718,37.20512820512821,10.504223727775694,4.092428205128206,680,31,113,15,9,220,105,156,0.126,0.726,0.147,0.6851,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,12,8,0,1,5,0,11,2,0,2,0,27,27,12,0,2,10,1,2,2,1,1,2,0,1,0,8,5,0,0,7,4,0,1,3,3,0,0,6,4,11,5,19,20,4,18,0,1,1,0,8,6,0,4,13,79,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276339823852552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675393066549187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802973668642032,0.0,0.0,0.3692158932452586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14370111808074584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019783430776578,0.0,0.0,0.1594250668873999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16872106502220266,0.11919224674774867,0.0,0.0,0.15249093464263305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890202745284973,0.0,0.1743365398378783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236618930162533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16302154210915892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15787031673669966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264836406631767,0.12371152850678728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592699532207798,0.11566751550945632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647367459233677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17007481990929413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867664116789495,0.23618382455572215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19111741006987232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17341314056201326,0.0,0.13410160444990338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084267964881386,0.32071762702898604,0.0,0.1324542322913586,0.0972871474781335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002666341201206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148820760540372
mentalhealth,ElJuancho115,2020/02/26,"I want to kill my younger brother. I hate my younger brother, I act like everything is ok with him, but deep down I hate him really bad, my grandfather passed away almost a year ago, he was the only reason I didn't lose my fucking head, but now I think I'm really close to make something horrible, I feel like shit every day but I have to simulate like everything's fine, most of people say that I'm a crazy bastard, so if I kill my brother they will be correct and I don't want to give them the reason. My only reasons not to do it are my dog and my action figures. I have no one in this world.
(Sorry for my english)",1.869860139860144,3.405876000000003,3.8144755244755264,88.76416083916084,77.46153846153847,6.881118881118883,24.89510489510489,7.686295010490155,1.2230000000000003,480,17,104,7,11,163,84,130,0.275,0.611,0.114,-0.9858,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,1,2,14,7,0,4,1,10,3,2,4,1,21,21,7,2,3,5,3,1,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,6,0,0,3,4,9,0,1,2,2,24,5,11,17,1,13,0,1,0,1,10,6,3,3,7,64,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334576500243553,0.0,0.15075877591180284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14145108857911382,0.0,0.12570687869104755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709532090944364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268488209212193,0.0,0.2706176977139552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612497566184433,0.10755630165751856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13918538624393292,0.0,0.14442577873552168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972831767550278,0.15451254846210313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3331329191227165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206602523007363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843218933923298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049642562237994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201975531577424,0.2290072542111173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437566645118862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928983810382229,0.4643858929917881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972713346765275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545422272492432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590435691858852,0.0,0.1685336509894492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646936715220167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776021155151169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695228516740084
mentalhealth,Freighttttrain,2020/02/26,"The Handicap Conspiracy, A Correlation Between Superheroes/Superpowers and Contemporary Mental Disorders Superheroes and their superpowers are really just one side of a coin, with the other side being all of the contemporary alleged mental disorders such as ADD, ADHD, and all forms of autism etc.

Why you ask, well what are superpowers? They are essentially handicaps... And what are mental disorders? They are also handicaps, and that superhero comics etc. arose during the first half of last century at about the same time as or a bit after modern psychology/psychiatry was getting started, is only further evidence of this likely intentional correlation that would have been designed for purposes of highly profitable media of all kinds as well as the contemporary pervasiveness and detrimental influence of the psychiatric profession, which would no doubt feed off of and bolster each other through this unforseen but fundamental link.

The superhero/mental handicap correlation is partiularly evident when you look at who is being cast as Bruce Wayne in the new Batman movie in development (hint: It ain't Jason David Frank), as if the throwback to the old 'nipplesuit' George Clooney films with the [metrosexual boofhead](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ben_Affleck) Batman from the last two movies wasn't bad enough.",14.830411324786324,13.759926389423079,12.938717948717947,43.46183760683763,49.528846153846146,17.129059829059827,48.59188034188034,15.322241378113626,7.98586047008547,1091,53,135,41,9,344,134,208,0.027000000000000003,0.9279999999999999,0.045,0.5833,3,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,2,3,1,7,7,0,1,16,0,17,1,0,2,3,25,21,18,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,11,11,1,0,1,2,2,0,3,2,2,4,3,1,5,5,29,14,10,19,0,0,1,0,7,9,0,3,11,108,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997105124949424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131013038183786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13221770574638886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808791685346855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15440463495518345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4862721697201311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613471742609666,0.31546306795994783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030005591258985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389119652005836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14942827455738653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14727729978631535,0.0,0.23056821231189714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06909542208531097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876535303854667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4275837090119319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659371433859313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840671037653655,0.0,0.09583644513797257,0.10756368257534928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906035064206578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010469068237213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246881279010876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13815629546435096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25432462422343505,0.0,0.1276183331510063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20093524445565253,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,roadtozion222,2020/02/26,"working out while depressed Hey everyone. I’ve been dealing with severe/clinical depression for awhile now and have been taking Zoloft for about a year. I used to be in really good shape and over the past 5 years since my depression got really bad, I’ve probably gained over 100 pounds. 

I’m 24 years old, 5’7 and weight around 260 pounds. Depression and side effects from Zoloft make it so hard to motivate myself to workout let alone even having the energy to do so. 

I feel like I have anxiety around working out too and have always been self-conscious even when my health was at its best. I have been trying to get back into working out but I either have no energy or I just have a panic attack just thinking about getting back into it. 

Have any of you experienced this?

Also, if anyone has any tips to working out with depression/anxiety it would be greatly appreciated.",5.426818181818181,6.9922162424242424,5.863409090909091,77.51511363636364,68.39393939393939,9.37878787878788,28.29545454545455,9.725611199111238,2.729454545454545,700,24,124,16,12,225,106,165,0.154,0.737,0.109,-0.7828,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,8,16,11,1,1,4,0,19,4,0,4,0,28,28,13,0,2,6,0,3,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,15,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,7,0,0,6,4,10,4,26,18,2,24,0,4,0,0,3,14,0,2,11,88,15,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297372169723633,0.0,0.10017472650274224,0.10423088025245274,0.0,0.0,0.1703695884357289,0.0,0.19165543630340093,0.0,0.0,0.08758850768285449,0.0,0.0,0.2230255974771721,0.0,0.14250752104099598,0.0,0.1926427812022608,0.10459140942416384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314583502184986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12914316746903665,0.4315637570552455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16547328242250792,0.0,0.0,0.11969649532589255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06333796988485321,0.08948965482198026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089204372468816,0.0,0.0,0.10506670725565664,0.10018621497555008,0.1381055889874947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11221322891890696,0.0,0.0,0.13315130423566315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12809239861564642,0.0,0.061198366210724636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836156533945022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13144500656698402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469720030010168,0.0,0.0,0.119580035834082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13505733019221985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16049649596354162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067917250406666,0.0,0.0,0.10362086579631932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941840208319076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026503546797932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504701060429434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081891201551574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15253955828800686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647789266824051,0.0,0.0,0.08898497399477286,0.0,0.0,0.2420005076446323
mentalhealth,qazsedcft0310,2020/02/26,"First job interview after have been tanking for 2 years, lost my academic career, lost my faith I had for 25 years, lost my past friends. I dont know guys. Every single bit of my confidence I got inside me was frictioned, grinded, rolled over in the past two years. I tried for a long time to come back to normal life, but it did not work for like 3 months. This incoming Sunday, I will be talking to the first employer willing to have a conversation with me. Although I have lowered my income expectation to quite a certain point, it does still feel good. And unreal. I mean after you have sent like 100 job applications and none of them replied, and suddenly you got a invitation for job interview, what was that?

I thought I would feel happy about this news, but I am feeling more than calm now. I dont know whether that comes from my depression, but still, it is some good news. Got to get myself working on the preps.

Wish you guys a sincere good day. And maybe a good tomorrow.",3.9912280701754383,5.692227947368423,4.503684210526316,85.33412280701758,72.15789473684211,8.014035087719298,27.403508771929822,8.648137234880735,1.9296035087719297,770,28,154,14,15,244,119,190,0.08199999999999999,0.7170000000000001,0.201,0.9794,6,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,3,1,8,5,16,0,0,9,0,17,1,0,0,1,27,35,9,0,4,5,0,3,2,1,3,1,0,0,2,8,7,0,0,7,0,0,3,4,4,0,3,13,3,24,12,22,18,5,27,1,4,0,0,12,4,0,1,22,101,32,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254849346364565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720261310207547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849516930276664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923435994742458,0.0,0.09246372419482908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394608824508094,0.0,0.2516358539075109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904502590269715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284401503373944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263028066966697,0.0,0.0,0.08294132762319507,0.0,0.05608796212564148,0.0,0.0,0.36017330493310207,0.2575820716595697,0.0,0.0,0.21259440343133784,0.0,0.1142801825354144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31959642974485936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179977502242757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582720769382749,0.10489534882343172,0.0,0.0,0.09500478980679387,0.0,0.0,0.3515682663842369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785138390702254,0.11693982778517405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08568882858237321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051839915604627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049628176011068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014840996018684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11418404688436595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17146586603494618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628696793418555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522697503400274,0.0625989003583479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288622553263681,0.0,0.10486912423078636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345164344082557,0.0,0.0,0.1563097805014705,0.0,0.0,0.07626110356513041,0.0,0.0,0.20739710254211607
mentalhealth,mapmyhealth,2020/02/26,"Challenges for a physically disabled person from getting mental health help  The following article brings into light the challenges faced by people with restricted movement. Access to better mental health and their mental well-being are critical to keeping them safe from depression and anxiety. Depression is estimated to affect more women with disabilities, with estimates ranging from 30% to 59%. According to Healthy People 2010, women with disabilities were more likely to show feelings of sadness, unhappiness, or depression, which discouraged them from being active, compared to women without disabilities. 

Learn More:-   [https://mapmyhealth.in/index.php/blog/blogdetails/8](https://mapmyhealth.in/index.php/blog/blogdetails/8)",16.60077507598784,21.09064190425532,11.991823708206685,33.005000000000024,44.85106382978724,13.031003039513678,45.34346504559271,12.28987398476788,7.545150759878418,625,30,48,18,7,178,66,94,0.22399999999999998,0.638,0.138,-0.9042,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,3,3,0,10,0,0,3,0,4,3,1,1,0,16,9,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,4,1,7,0,4,2,1,0,3,1,5,0,0,1,3,3,5,20,7,3,4,0,5,0,0,8,1,0,1,1,37,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422896528498744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674412490296556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.487155454615262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532909721676362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850189691756796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4008083507916752,0.0,0.0,0.1263712171341855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16757881039127792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921088094963464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5699976236992114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614132344262161,0.16462172536705713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695158496456042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817412721043612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Borsnans_Porse,2020/02/26,"I don't know how to deal with my trust and abandonment issues. I lately made a really good new friend who I have spent a lot of time and started to fall in love with, but I have problem that I just can't get it to my head that someone would actually purely enjoy and want to spend time with me and I keep getting scared that it will just disappear again because I'm being to pushy or needy. I'm stuck in mindset that I need reassuring from them that I'm worth spending time with... And I know it's not right to make someone else reassure you of your self worth. 

I also go too easily to speculation mode and I can only see negative outcomes of things and it can ruin my whole day and give me really bad anxiety.

I feel like if I can't fix this I will just become annoying and push them away... 

We basically spent the nearly everyday at least 2h together during the last 2 months and every time they want some own time I feel like I have done something wrong and I'm gonna lose them.. I know when I think logically that I'm just over reacting, but I can't remove my anxiety and fear.",5.142259615384617,4.8990090089285765,6.301428571428572,80.57434065934066,68.28571428571428,10.106593406593408,28.39148351648352,9.851270322608157,2.3369667582417586,854,25,183,18,13,288,132,224,0.21899999999999997,0.631,0.15,-0.9708,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,1,2,4,1,10,18,1,2,4,0,14,2,1,4,1,47,42,19,0,6,9,0,2,2,1,4,0,0,0,1,13,17,0,2,7,0,6,5,6,9,0,0,5,3,31,9,21,32,5,26,0,3,1,1,15,7,0,4,16,115,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.1280897400377024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496768504221987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20082537958288216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332204573851376,0.0,0.10959568851188188,0.08001419961891068,0.144965128937618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465112376631168,0.1353221496229731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13432341419249455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964995787052333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059127400616538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14770274076475584,0.1327368749822318,0.1875427511475852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141029100731168,0.0,0.13715470258707846,0.12591548548656675,0.07459745072159714,0.11009372743666017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347094869330781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700017659139258,0.0,0.1166689303371825,0.0,0.0,0.21640935583068946,0.10699351233637204,0.14806574251950033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825292474005254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14684512057263824,0.0,0.11159161242953028,0.11846627080571495,0.12420033321462895,0.0876163267575606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476959185042002,0.0,0.0,0.09732680202738953,0.0,0.12677065163160858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982829882033484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255970285942811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817560902669168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209437287851716,0.0,0.0,0.13141304484956615,0.0,0.10459633932258323,0.0,0.1369316463330627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224304591327141,0.1010495044526489,0.0,0.0,0.09290571627423276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720257253772105,0.08410539521338073,0.0,0.0,0.38269056476390795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15483978548925825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14654586055152907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324254779490464,0.1435109882949887,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LinkkysCreations,2020/02/26,"What Happened to Me? Growing up as a kid, even though my parents got divorced in my early childhood leaving my dad ""homeless"" to this day and my older sister picking on/bullying me and a bunch of other things, I was known by many as a bright, talented kid who was very social and outgoing. When I was about 13, I was brutally cyberbullied on a semi-popular game creating site that I still use to this day and am very popular on. When I was 15, I ended up losing my v-card at the wrong time to someone about 5 years older than me and that impacted me in a way, especially because of how young I was and unprepared of the emotions that I would deal with afterwards, and having to talk to law enforcement and authorities in front of my family. At the age of 17, I escaped from a toxic relationship with a smart girl and afterwards she ended up being dominant over me and bullied/threatened me to the point where I was sent to the principle's office for my suicidal thoughts at the time.  


Regardless of all of those scarring things in my life, I managed to keep everything under my belt throughout high school and graduated feeling proud and grateful of all of my accomplishments that I made, such as being around the top 50 in my class with a 4.3 GPA, being one of the school's greatest musicians in band/jazz band, earning my Eagle Scout, etc. I decided to go into on the of the top universities in my state, but was placed into a small campus in a bad city with an undeclared major. The first semester was great for me in terms of the social activity I had, but my grades weren't due to choosing terrible classes and professors who were uncaring about their students' performance. I was placed on academic probation which left me broken for a small period due to my below average performance.  


Since my campus is much smaller and has a small dorm community that is optional for people to sign up for (since they expect commuters to go here), people started leaving to the main campus or another campus, dropping out, or just attending school regularly and not living in the dorm. The annual parties that we had started to come to a close, and I started to lack the opportunity to connect and socialize with others more.

\_\_Even though I did much better in the next semester, my mental (and physical) health started declining at the fastest pace that I've ever seen it.\_\_ I placed myself into an English class that required public speaking on a daily basis, and on the first day, for some reason, I was just too anxious to speak. Every time I was required to speak, I started blanking for long periods, sometimes not even saying a single word because I was just too scared and feeling judged to speak. I started making noticeable gulping sounds and tried my best to hide it but couldn't. This all made me want to drop out, but regardless, I still kept pushing so I could get off of academic probation, despite all of the extreme embarrassment that I had to face every class. Sometimes I randomly look back on those ""extreme embarrassments"" and cringe and hate myself so much for it. In my last semester, I thankfully didn't have as much public speaking to do in any of my courses, but when I did, I still felt the same way and did the same anxious habits. I also ended up doing well that semester.  


I am now in a new semester. I have finally declared a major, which is American Studies, but unfortunately I still feel the same way. There are 2 classes that I'm in now that require public speaking, and it's like they'll choose on you if you do not raise your hand or say anything. The anxious person that I am, I end up blanking or saying little when I have things to say or get chosen to speak randomly. One particular class that I'm in is small with 7 other students in it. Every time that I have to attend this class, I feel very awkward and socially anxious, and the worst part is that it's about 3 hours long. In fact, this class happens every Wednesdays (today) so I'm already very anxious about attending it again. It is very obvious that I'm the most anxious person in this class and every time I am chosen to speak, I can't find anything to say and everyone just looks at me with a concerned face.  


Since I was taught to ""be a man"" growing up, I grew a habit of holding back my tears whenever I needed to cry. My anxieties that I faced in the beginning of this semester were so immense that I cried so hard for the first time since November 2018. I wanted to run away, I even wanted to hang myself on the spot because I just can't deal with this all anymore. I locked myself in the bathroom, roommates were not around fortunately and just bawled my eyes out on the toilet just hoping that I can one day overcome these anxieties that I can't help but show anymore.  


I'm in a small friend group here at my dorm in which we all get together every week to play some video games and it's like I feel more relaxed with them since I know them well. I don't do drugs because of my high reputation so I don't smoke weed, I don't drink, but they all do mostly on a weekly basis. I don't really feel left out because of that, but sometimes I also feel awkward and anxious when I'm with them.  


Last night we played again together, and a random wave of depression hit me after maybe about a month without feeling depressed in any way. I couldn't really play right because thoughts were clouding my mind and they kept making comments about that like ""you can only play one character"", ""you keep spamming the same moves"" and just grew really upset about it and fought back some tears. I was ready to just run back to my room at one point but I couldn't because I knew that I would start bawling my eyes out immediately and they would notice. They did kind of notice my behaviors and said things like ""What's wrong with you, \*\*Dan\*\*?"" (since that's my real name), and I just can't seem to fully explain it.   


Each day that goes by has started to traumatically impact me in some ways and has been making me more and more anxious and depressed as time goes by. Currently, I feel very depressed: there are noticeable bags under my eyes from not only the poor sleep that I have been having, but from all of the tears that I have also been holding back recently. I cannot really walk around as well as I was a few days ago. I feel ill and I have had lymph nodes swelling in different places, along with some shooting nerve pain in particular areas. I cough every day. This world really sucks sometimes, and it's just getting worse and worse. It doesn't even snow where I live anymore due to climate change, which is even more depressing because winter has always been my favorite season and my only chance to really motivate myself to workout and shovel. It's like I've permanently lost most of my confidence in everything and can't retrieve it, or fix it. I refuse/am scared to see a therapist or doctor, I refuse to go on medication if I'm diagnosed with anything serious/mental issues. I want to live in a world where depression and anxiety is non-existent and I can just be me again. I've even started to struggle speaking around my family. \*\*This sucks. I really, do not know what happened.\*\* I'll probably die from a weakened immune system, cancer, or even this new coronavirus that's been going around. I read a post on here that says ""Not everyone is supposed to live"". Oh, how much I can relate to that. As I said, it just gets worse and worse. I blame the obvious and vast carelessness that we've all evolved into.",9.27546961325967,7.101188915745858,9.002396408839779,70.8174482044199,61.08563535911602,12.254419889502769,38.57803867403315,10.820120047756994,4.03625635359116,5962,231,1103,116,64,1935,522,1448,0.13699999999999998,0.77,0.094,-0.9974,3,0,3,1,2,2,170.0,3,6,10,19,82,54,5,8,66,0,97,22,8,11,13,224,177,99,2,19,42,3,13,5,1,4,12,18,4,6,79,86,2,10,25,13,1,20,24,28,3,8,51,39,157,26,197,112,45,224,0,8,8,0,72,105,2,24,94,793,236,37,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03053374450138625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0380113252104455,0.082637856087514,0.028661309370420576,0.0,0.0,0.04684806911004427,0.03611897652596615,0.07905184729002775,0.3113077324846133,0.10248166163571694,0.0,0.0,0.0850368201592031,0.153318422317212,0.0,0.0,0.032362561436751036,0.13243182674470194,0.028760447342799263,0.1679806354474551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03614829344059792,0.0304641328975144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03643863692495356,0.029671638499333908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027501827181334527,0.0,0.07567324875773666,0.1555009101592613,0.07102333333348193,0.17800649371946106,0.034961328126864887,0.03574885854323561,0.03598808305063378,0.0,0.035256298438833794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033743351664701916,0.0399456965422638,0.0,0.0,0.03874640796264553,0.12203350480675736,0.0,0.03841569568001694,0.1820067499598373,0.031157811557969806,0.20315198426786651,0.06582805930030082,0.061914559697726884,0.0,0.06494406346873739,0.0,0.1741661535782186,0.0,0.033072959458624686,0.03773322201462651,0.03148244653239945,0.08789764902965734,0.0,0.0,0.02661240943084665,0.0,0.08998142753456274,0.0,0.07830439618627721,0.0,0.02754911111861336,0.03797614490223582,0.0,0.0,0.09137978771675104,0.0,0.030856288095321305,0.034007674202048116,0.0,0.03661382034316581,0.0,0.0,0.023088007181283343,0.07278685468329239,0.0,0.03421202712846663,0.03392175352611655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03595201981311307,0.0,0.06123325968501889,0.0,0.035869554973604965,0.03786055192115135,0.05615515207494237,0.0,0.07294535214360162,0.07484999624694741,0.0,0.0243297853431231,0.08414134576439962,0.0345233124764417,0.12166358032239274,0.06096614164933785,0.05785087540247784,0.0385355611623216,0.037601193180859985,0.0,0.0,0.06518608883031363,0.06897766106393284,0.034922201408644084,0.034605006556640214,0.0,0.0,0.03470008906471757,0.034712833949912175,0.0,0.03478000706127287,0.0,0.02749396778700738,0.036609979846500273,0.12660656100813825,0.02554080733247377,0.0,0.0665351110133853,0.0366330445419414,0.03232464879828171,0.0,0.0,0.15686514006255273,0.0,0.0,0.11670537965928945,0.07859177410703151,0.03665230503335468,0.0,0.038247509945226514,0.0373009818564922,0.0,0.047760168577835736,0.060152741481219685,0.14395233220253512,0.0,0.06512402168422644,0.0,0.03298914537722162,0.0,0.03713793756712677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034454694014172824,0.039206375078704066,0.15446611401422436,0.03541557990886168,0.03401064992885105,0.03698143935924491,0.0,0.029416160000191788,0.06553087452072467,0.16435405699939412,0.06897165404719564,0.10458166808735407,0.027448502310477102,0.03135777354383304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17096140901578466,0.0,0.03447024864330495,0.1404508782597456,0.029185452430583205,0.0,0.13626941709749218,0.0,0.21942550818633605,0.0,0.11003247623590208,0.0,0.0,0.036009782341206366,0.0,0.037677646922025264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027685885734106647,0.0,0.031712671214907874,0.0,0.039993732473768466,0.09153589998591433,0.0,0.06768480739564088,0.054691556529248016,0.14059761638706542,0.0,0.03265018563987929,0.0,0.0,0.02338614694661719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029749742454157225,0.0,0.17052623887290175,0.08126709285012322,0.13670566737718848,0.05526000038522613,0.0,0.09291158009034436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033204110007309266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404111097487997,0.07340701324230632,0.07532121524148506,0.0,0.02218169062310565
mentalhealth,023305088,2020/02/26,"Is this sign of other mental illness  20yr M
Over the past year I've had tooth aches. I didn't know what it was and the state of mind that I was in I honestly didn't care. My mom and I were talking and I told her briefly about it and she asked to look and my mouth and I showed her.

She told me my wisdom teeth had came in and didn't understand how I didn't mention it before. I scheduled a dentist appointment to get a professional opinion on what to do next. 

My dentist took x-rays and informed me that I should have them all pulled. He also informed me in a concerned way that I've been biting on the gum tissue that is still healing  (this is something I haven't noticed) 

Can my ability to not recognize  physical pain expect for things I see with my eyes like burns, cuts etc. be a sign of mental illness?",2.000714285714288,3.8169105000000014,3.2470476190476205,91.73128571428572,77.92857142857143,6.146666666666667,24.29523809523809,7.0316486544052195,0.8162709523809529,636,22,138,7,15,206,101,168,0.076,0.8370000000000001,0.087,0.3968,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,4,6,1,0,7,0,19,10,4,1,1,23,30,10,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,1,6,0,0,0,13,10,0,0,4,1,0,3,6,2,0,0,14,3,25,4,16,14,2,16,0,0,3,0,14,6,0,1,6,94,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504849107659105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591989640428507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16012458819033504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21522411658981733,0.1918587784620134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20986686284415312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831460592676612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341704239100097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919336742884774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802110984315065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3792758888022756,0.0,0.1900049144611407,0.22039038182723653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001281507039463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142405223424169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20023337172983655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17963603845111173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995253808892572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14486768622533736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15027822736147062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15124937558012472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250162975549915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3596219734648555,0.20907133731933245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19589867452666565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14936597678427976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211796829719341
mentalhealth,Bartutitu12,2020/02/26,"Hey guys! So I've been wandering, why does my personality change so drastically depending on the season?

I mean, last time I was at summer camp I was the popular kid, everyone thought I was funny and intelligent, but now, I just moved to a new school and I'm nowhere close to being popular, everyone thinks I'm rather mysterious and I don't like it that way.

So I would be full of gratitude if someone knows the reason.",2.195311653116533,4.7580376097561015,4.512113821138211,78.94088075880761,81.4390243902439,9.01029810298103,26.184281842818432,9.444778638647367,2.866426558265583,332,14,65,11,9,115,61,82,0.033,0.7909999999999999,0.177,0.8916,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,0,8,0,0,2,0,15,14,8,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,0,8,3,5,6,1,12,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,7,39,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25029517152701203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20705335123563876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4521696414658111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342747021545344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300311172002491,0.19286346316508185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115592537744966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577306164432721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514721174711427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22851317213048145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20659308384490402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432678441368024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394554129125463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20047341060674387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151605994022558,0.0,0.18783678092515324,0.13796542618197222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878048761009281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134978924290184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16807636546713958,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saltedguman,2020/02/26,"Warning: this post might trigger you, I just want an honest open discussion idk. I started to doubt if suicide is really that selfish of them, moreover if that one suffering soul no longer have anyone. 

I wonder if that's actually our selfishness for not letting him die just because our 'consciences'

I started to doubt if I should stop my friend from doing it",10.19409090909091,8.600939924242425,9.259696969696972,67.85954545454545,58.84848484848485,11.830303030303032,43.21212121212121,10.504223727775694,4.6918848484848485,289,14,47,5,3,91,52,66,0.321,0.5489999999999999,0.131,-0.9317,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,2,1,1,0,2,7,0,2,1,0,6,0,0,1,0,16,10,4,2,6,7,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,11,2,5,7,0,5,1,1,0,0,7,1,0,8,3,37,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.2720381051368454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949216046026428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993485381391832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893179697470289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21537605899492773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850599529103592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29572960987089875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889009320996674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26698342137789244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178586411356561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39462793825929293,0.0,0.0,0.23306317287015865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049277866912031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442504228634935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30231283791333713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SaberBack,2020/02/26,"What's wrong with me? Panic attack, anxiety or normal? I've recently landed my dream job, despite being underqualified and inexperienced and I have constant feelings of inadequacy. The feelings are fine, but I also have moments when people would be asking me questions and my body physically shuts down. I can't see all of a sudden, lose focus and it becomes an out of body experience. I've never experienced this before and could use some help verbalizing what's wrong. Is this normal? Or am I experiencing anxiety or attack of some sort?",5.803221649484534,8.18802894845361,7.6294716494845405,61.95905283505157,68.79381443298968,9.386082474226805,30.68170103092784,9.827888789773867,3.562196907216496,436,18,65,11,8,152,69,97,0.23,0.7090000000000001,0.061,-0.9506,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,2,7,2,1,3,0,10,2,2,1,2,24,15,11,0,4,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,5,8,1,7,11,3,10,0,1,1,0,3,4,0,7,6,48,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304690292457504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496148439545873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525209271285916,0.37120776027131197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801836407020764,0.13882654063613326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36244027717350413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17630453212447209,0.0,0.13026003570445666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15958960023054986,0.0,0.0,0.1649845970889106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935435743774401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618987599316597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18252036636686134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12582944101009172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196999005006873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19141848675095965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310596243623593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827625835008029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16108851404137636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000746704652624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14090709278062102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589533188531885,0.3567524485543223,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xXRAV3R5Xx,2020/02/26,"Everything is Pretty Shit  Iv never really made a post on here but might as well try to explain myself so lets start of strong. Every relationship I have starts off strong and withers away to nothing.  I have friends sure but I still still feel like I'm slowly going downhill until I one day cut everyone out of my life.  I have mild aspergers, enough that I'm not totally incapable of picking on social signals but more of so realise that hic-ups build up over time until one day you find yourself always the one to instigate the conversation and see what you've become.  It fucking hurts.  Starting off in high school I had  a small friend group that back-stabbed me and after this point I just sort of cut everyone out and just focused on studying and wasting my time with useless bullshit.   I started off University strong and part of me believed that I was actually able to change.  The thing about random people is that you can be whatever your Ideal version of yourself is and this gives you the opportunity to change.  

Slowly you realise that  the person you trying to change into isn't even possible. First year was great but now I can feel Im slowly starting to go down the same path. You can realise your sliding but there's nothing you can do to stop yourself.  The thing with Autism no matter how slight your always going to be fighting this uphill battle.  I always picture  in the future one day being happy but  slowly seems  like this goal is work of fiction. My goal in life is to travel,  work remotely and enjoy beautiful cliffside views as I drink my morning coffee one of those nice modern ones.  I won't have to know anyone or care what people think of me then maybe i'll actually be happy.",6.061110622710623,6.946593024615389,6.239560439560439,77.8928205128205,66.44615384615385,8.405860805860806,30.553113553113555,8.418075326091056,2.3250190476190484,1363,49,240,18,21,435,184,325,0.11,0.688,0.20199999999999999,0.9909,0,0,1,0,2,0,19.0,0,10,0,10,13,25,6,0,10,0,25,6,1,3,3,43,46,23,0,1,10,0,2,2,2,2,3,0,0,1,16,13,1,1,7,2,0,5,5,8,1,7,4,4,31,17,45,35,6,48,0,2,2,1,20,19,2,5,25,170,47,5,0.08945723812159306,0.0,0.17459472008987445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22330676516129092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06255058087900604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404801996744189,0.06878709424973717,0.0,0.0,0.09879849120704788,0.0,0.10078767353471252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120761627735144,0.0,0.2839016889785153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17307755392729596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763403663291741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243324040669224,0.0,0.059085662088005864,0.0,0.07537158137648525,0.17096044926180226,0.08039839738767518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904645349670706,0.06390826878846742,0.0,0.0,0.0817622949886217,0.07609228104697577,0.0,0.0,0.13822888052893806,0.0827017751486821,0.0,0.08581553423809303,0.15252182990208854,0.0,0.0,0.0986269208408498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19045778686203893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09451648361865284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576582360777193,0.0,0.09662916811045448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04916335856273865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147608689264468,0.12637258570022974,0.08740857577315007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464660169618002,0.0,0.0,0.08987181956317808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489999283689336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899493690317045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17167326530544527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36371123833626623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968734713414694,0.0,0.12403677039357736,0.07811060980124754,0.0,0.0,0.0845660051595948,0.1008495947850782,0.0856753058558866,0.09101017162729387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05730859742419009,0.0,0.0,0.09604359530580467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09053550087306024,0.0712858367152461,0.08143850980700344,0.0,0.0,0.09182656939676068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119038864932427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31659146788170656,0.0,0.14288133184105908,0.0747902566996156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431238824667478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886282803649198,0.057320586063357715,0.0,0.0,0.10432646988950668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214711851144586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043280045371473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13025186956616724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05760752837954495
mentalhealth,Benusivx,2020/02/26,"My girlfriend has pretty bad anxiety and depression and i don’t know how to help her Me and my girlfriend have been dating for a year, I have nothing but love for this girl, she’s been one of the best things that happened in my life. 

Before me, she dated a person that was literally a sociopath. This person would regularly cheat on her, trick her into thinking that she had a heart illness that could kill her at any moment, she would manipulate her, lie to her constantly and make her feel horrible about herself. My girlfriend was a very very insecure girl that just came out as bi and this person took her under her wing. 
It hurts me a lot that this pos has to this day a huge affect on my girlfriend. She is very insecure about herself. In addition to this, her past trauma caused a lot of tension in our relationship for ex, my girlfriend gets extremely upset about me talking to any female that she’s not familiar with. She even told me that she has absolutely no reason to not trust me but it’s the little voice in her head going off. 

This really hurts her and me in the process. My girlfriend went back to therapy and although it seems like it’s helping a little bit, she still struggles a lot. 

If anyone has a similar situation i would appreciate all the feedback and maybe some advice how to deal with it.",7.015848739495798,6.716772772549021,7.200630252100838,75.87926470588236,64.41176470588235,10.266106442577033,33.116246498599445,9.784248007369934,3.018742296918767,1047,38,197,19,14,339,136,255,0.228,0.698,0.07400000000000001,-0.9937,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,1,9,17,3,5,15,0,17,6,2,7,1,40,30,15,1,5,6,1,1,1,6,3,2,1,0,5,21,14,0,0,5,0,0,4,4,13,0,1,9,2,41,4,31,17,7,28,0,3,0,2,43,15,0,6,10,153,62,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135455243807007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580347211080224,0.0,0.0888897299780424,0.0,0.0,0.0812470436245118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934766022592702,0.0970189243890686,0.0,0.0,0.09887435791420074,0.0,0.12194068146110727,0.0,0.12685609165776954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289743053186953,0.0,0.1193654447164369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255667492058332,0.0,0.0927731637851301,0.0,0.0,0.07493689840949436,0.11979311942562493,0.10007956615491406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674645539316784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058752260296016226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060707687960089386,0.0,0.0660369447872145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275186392282452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925076346259375,0.0,0.0,0.13769298678904784,0.15576764827867134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24878074476873135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285538143513632,0.0,0.0638583604139635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207277086035011,0.05676756529835138,0.23291811861547254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963574121142845,0.10487155403662173,0.0,0.0775618265313249,0.0,0.11673464166204894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149333131225382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873751245942971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092236464640856,0.0,0.3043739658150408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182132488710239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443822342736242,0.11946898559744183,0.0,0.12475117046090757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057806029300296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060933114048326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279438846198723,0.0,0.0,0.1214734356732117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933940568679712,0.0,0.0,0.1328804140606042,0.0,0.07719555309561471,0.07445379548881674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11103039239641753,0.1290981882878622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876219566123071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771498701519797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476272146429521,0.0,0.0,0.07482650529507863
mentalhealth,ImHere2AskAQuestion,2020/02/26,"I haven't been truly happy for a while I'm not quite sure how to lay this all out there so sorry if this feels like a rant.

Looking back, 2019 was probably my worst year since my age hit double digits. I was working multiple jobs I hated while maintaining full time status as a college student, and at the tail end of the year my \~3 year long relationship with my girlfriend ended. In the moment none of it really seemed all too bad, the working multiple jobs & dealing with school, but looking back I can see I was just too tired and stressed to really take a moment to examine where my life was at. After the breakup I tried therapy (I can no longer can afford it, but it helped a bit while it was there) and it helped with the initial shock of it all, but now I'm at a point where I'm no longer heartbroken and sad, I'm just... existing. 

A lot of the initial improvements I saw in my mental health after the breakup were motivated by a goal of self improvement in all the areas I saw that I had been lacking in the relationship. Now, as more and more time passes I feel like this motivation is running thin, and continuing to dwell on the relationship looking for areas to improve just makes me sad and I'd rather forgive & forget for the most part. 

I'm trying to stay positive, but sources of enjoyment are far and few between. Things I used to enjoy like video games, exercise, cooking, or even browsing reddit/youtube are much less enjoyable than they used to be. Hanging out with friends is usually enjoyable, but life isn't so simple anymore and neither I nor my friends can afford to hang out enough to make me feel not like a ghost. Beyond that, I don't want my friends to feel as though they have to babysit me for fear that I won't be okay without them. I ***know*** that there is happiness to be found in my own company, doing things I love, but right now the energy to start/find what those things may be escapes me.

These days I'm still extremely busy. I'm working a job I admittedly enjoy, but it takes up nearly 30 hours a week spread unevenly across all 7 days, meaning I don't get any official days off. Even if the hours on any given day are minimal, I'm still spending at least to 3 hours + 1.5 hours commuting every day with work, and that's ignoring school obligations. I have a few close friends, and they're amazing. As an introvert, I've found it takes me a very very long time to open up to people, years even. Making new friends is really challenging because of this, not to mention the fact that I barely have any time to give to my current friends, so why would I waste the time? 

I just feel like everything I'm doing these days is because i'm *supposed* to be doing them, so its less about fun/peace and more about survival. Exercise? I do it so I have a reminder that I can't avoid eating like I tend to when I'm stressed. Cooking? Going out is too expensive, and again I have to have food available so I don't whither away. Work at a job I think I like? Welllll I'm mainly doing it because it will help my resume more than anything, and if I had the chance to quit I probably would. Where's the enjoyment in doing anything if you feel like you're forced to do it?

Sorry for the rant. I'm starting to feel like I'm at the end of my rope here, and I'm not quite sure who to turn to on this. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.",4.321069642170066,5.138828545722717,5.143216621777609,84.44026933435939,70.3274336283186,8.550519430550214,28.89842247018084,8.779410014580577,2.0623029626779537,2646,96,549,45,46,861,293,678,0.10400000000000001,0.7040000000000001,0.192,0.9974,7,1,0,0,0,0,83.0,0,1,4,13,38,43,1,5,36,1,54,11,0,8,8,91,108,44,1,10,22,0,8,9,7,6,6,0,0,1,33,26,4,2,18,6,2,5,17,12,0,0,15,14,55,31,85,80,28,91,0,2,6,1,27,38,0,9,56,362,88,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05468237598976817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12126285972299902,0.0,0.15221584622028242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05549617854864373,0.0,0.0,0.0920987907385627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052575215676229206,0.08605785876507213,0.04672333260603327,0.1023360529806222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610926105494449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21653311356928406,0.05769115456683401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057259910774629275,0.0,0.0,0.1486888911933156,0.05782048823895095,0.0,0.11088094980178233,0.0,0.047147775144045216,0.0,0.05029223870256105,0.0,0.0,0.06296930451626481,0.19806145981488688,0.23986223706516915,0.0,0.0,0.05114540824251968,0.0,0.06766570736380446,0.12271206085534092,0.2594021801813244,0.0,0.029236208442464762,0.053680862710225895,0.03180272462314503,0.0,0.0,0.061694869631654985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913854990715922,0.0,0.055247814957848224,0.0,0.05948167931746706,0.0,0.0,0.11252418565161908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22043292354803312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221222399810124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030753540426116544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07905083250415755,0.2460481670183915,0.0,0.0,0.0990437067976183,0.14097411250751488,0.0,0.0,0.047574243972409815,0.05050507961224891,0.0,0.11205897327891433,0.0,0.0,0.060955632024831376,0.0,0.0,0.05639339565925855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04113622009826173,0.0,0.0,0.05404544103233642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059802064409987,0.0,0.03879484583784023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05289923500714363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066628787576247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17855749089461034,0.0,0.0,0.107546086303264,0.0,0.0,0.18023670537911107,0.0,0.047788583094670316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326676075416067,0.04459198731173386,0.05094286836397237,0.05837732252777236,0.0,0.0,0.04628976896077686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12528278344803026,0.07921597539874238,0.059644727164947314,0.08937767767236546,0.0,0.12820143024480946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548117606968094,0.0,0.12622235484913866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399386328055985,0.0,0.11152979253394504,0.03585619478170098,0.05497932161186658,0.0,0.1631503828794894,0.06431650784799359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598482103818442,0.06086719923025907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666102164975064,0.061630807381293125,0.09234388327307318,0.03300600094901137,0.0,0.0448868431536216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05049419098349423,0.0,0.0,0.05394236943770118,0.0,0.20369367824863904,0.0,0.0,0.11925476173771996,0.0,0.0,0.14414275221723602
mentalhealth,JGizzleYT,2020/02/26,why is it that i need help but everytime someone reaches out i can’t seem to express myself i use twitter to vent because i’m followed by people i don’t know in real life so it’s easier to tweet out how i’m feeling and i need help and to talk to someone but everytime someone reaches out i cant seem to talk to them or express myself. i cant stand this,1.1095054945054912,2.7264674230769224,3.7326373626373615,88.14807692307693,79.8974358974359,5.995604395604397,27.809523809523807,6.868970318607317,1.3785985347985346,281,13,60,3,7,99,44,78,0.0,0.807,0.193,0.8972,1,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,17,15,7,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,10,0,12,15,0,6,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,3,0,38,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13264131646729996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100204334059071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916930189220373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958219911772952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536907988796423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226816042640051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15085004573270366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24766593794565064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3961729377444618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5530918711111421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497824445350524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18792856655989365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19634182981251488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bcrouch1,2020/02/26,"I just found out I have OCD today. What a relief! The title sounds weird. It is, of course, not a “good” thing to have a disorder as debilitating as OCD. However, I have been thinking for several months now that I just had depression with a bunch of other weird, unexplainable issues.
I went on the minimum dose of Prozac three years ago in my freshman year of high school and felt fine for the entire time (granted, with some bad days). At the beginning of this school, I noticed a lot of the depression symptoms coming back, along with a lot of other things I hadn’t noticed before:

- Major anxiety and occasional panic attacks
- Constant worrying about suicidal thoughts I was having that were really inconsequential and not anything to be worried about from a logic perspective, because they never manifested themselves as a solid plan to end my life. Rather than giving me relief from my anxiety and depression, they just caused more panic.
- Having to repeatedly apologize when I did something wrong
- Having to have multiple people analyze situations for me to help determine whether I did something wrong
- Overanalyzing texts and emails, thinking that people were upset with me
- Obsessing about little details of things in my life

All these things combined, my psychiatrist told me at my first session with her that she doesn’t like to diagnose at the first session, but she’s pretty certain she wants to diagnose me with OCD.",10.626779548472776,9.747646760956176,9.867898406374504,61.56952357237718,57.486055776892435,13.147543160690573,41.235391766268265,12.161744961471696,5.277445949535194,1151,51,176,30,12,368,148,251,0.149,0.773,0.078,-0.9041,1,0,2,0,0,1,30.0,0,0,2,3,10,19,1,4,14,0,18,7,0,1,3,36,29,11,1,2,8,0,1,1,0,0,7,1,0,0,14,14,0,0,6,0,0,2,5,13,0,3,13,2,27,6,42,15,7,28,0,3,0,0,11,9,0,3,18,141,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395211500259604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621613151622713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721923058699642,0.0,0.0,0.12057684080476505,0.0,0.0814983580920265,0.08849569223827447,0.06460940279963018,0.0,0.09018812364011314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088790431972751,0.0,0.09129942095632294,0.0,0.11453555543986264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835359947244121,0.0,0.2738623585518705,0.2151515167535104,0.0,0.0,0.12147162165905293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938740569245756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176526139438384,0.0,0.0,0.18030696125325127,0.0,0.1162105544027097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10167350744316968,0.0,0.08889784582668943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104163414278304,0.1119823174909232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062410966017802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972515345713974,0.05178046468143576,0.10622798733086763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18021469866245465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459874363870808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174460828155776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24133646101588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24870855487708646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469576995564522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782806917776333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789873370245288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21453136669519468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973646027210938,0.0,0.0,0.11913514033306885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16318973799598446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11593385202016775,0.0,0.0,0.11016228756019968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816553142361005,0.13582587547821007,0.0,0.0841427655306673,0.0618025524574657,0.0,0.1004643893563326,0.10127623550231099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251456690019451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825209257237162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152722565632952,0.0,0.0,0.2317628444222428,0.0,0.1365058090585262
mentalhealth,SadNViolent,2020/02/26,"Realized I have serious scopophobia (fear of being stared at). Please help I am 17 years old. I don't know what happened to me,but my social anxiety has worsened so much over time,to the point I can't even make eye contact with people anymore. I can fearlessly speak with them,but I fear to look them in the eye for some unknown reason. I instantly get a panic attack when I do so. It got so bad that I started drinking in school daily,just to get temporarily rid of it,because when I am sober I can get a panic attack even from the teacher taking a stare at me when it's class. I have a psychologist,but I have to wait one more week for my appointment with him. The phobia affects my life so much that I faked being ill today,because I can't take the suffering anymore that the phobia gives me in school. Is there some way I could help myself?",5.407558139534885,5.246335337209303,6.211023255813953,81.16769767441862,67.72093023255815,8.973023255813953,29.990697674418605,8.548686976883017,2.1057237209302317,666,22,135,9,10,220,99,172,0.201,0.726,0.07200000000000001,-0.9684,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,0,10,11,2,4,10,0,16,5,2,3,0,12,29,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,6,3,1,1,3,1,0,0,3,10,0,1,1,6,24,1,18,25,5,15,0,1,5,0,8,7,0,2,7,90,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105555616865886,0.0,0.27368152376532034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139481891387107,0.0,0.0,0.11520894949374465,0.16822471773929445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11016715355484023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516952818404712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18227121273283545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105355298536136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21626921758155432,0.13236461219301948,0.0,0.0,0.11035656412543718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201675472714915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849724395142731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583112950399402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09746054980926107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158698698767229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210385099359872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20286484029832366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478857495233205,0.0,0.09349996563375232,0.0,0.0,0.3237835719771208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956591318610738,0.0,0.0,0.15146246291882126,0.1304372987599942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186816040722258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792896780089939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065495876084128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766415193201526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20749012101244632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804582343453004,0.0,0.13079051043648066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952344475483558,0.11068059056111644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885568587385254
mentalhealth,lilcitrusflower,2020/02/26,"How to stay on top of school during a depressive episode? Basically, I've been suffering from depression since I was about 15. When I would feel a depressive episode coming on, it wouldn't really affect my schoolwork as much; I went to an underfunded high school where the curriculum was a lot easier than it should've been, so making decent grades in school with minimal studying/work ethic was easy.

However, now that I'm in college and my classes are getting increasingly harder with every semester, I find that my former routine doesn't produce the same results (obviously). So nowadays, when I feel the depression starting to take over and my motivation and energy are beginning to slip away, I find it even more difficult to stay on top of schoolwork.

Does anyone have any advice or examples of what they do whenever they're in a similar situation but still have a lot of work to do? I have a midterm in 2 days that I haven't even begun studying for due to my current state, and the stress is actually pushing me further away from being productive rather than motivating me to start now. Any insight would be much appreciated, thanks.",10.891589580010633,8.779567047846893,10.517384370015948,61.01946836788945,57.94736842105264,14.456353003721425,43.79638490164805,13.023866798666859,5.782157469431155,919,43,153,27,9,302,127,209,0.076,0.8140000000000001,0.109,0.7854,2,0,0,1,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,6,14,8,0,1,11,0,20,0,0,7,1,29,32,12,0,4,3,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,7,0,0,4,3,7,0,0,6,2,16,1,31,21,7,35,0,5,0,0,1,15,0,3,13,109,23,11,0.0,0.0,0.12417257282559566,0.0,0.0,0.12434214919721184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306165943158436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897252511970019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391013628563801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961013109605104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206237148695048,0.0,0.4383830508264993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135278493464924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16808798513024312,0.0,0.10720923487988912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867759174561294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23259889012992574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648015793596736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444112100657998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21635796305079366,0.0,0.0,0.08493689433526881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870791429335289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151627934137838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3863356029211502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525821627616118,0.14302849035922338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18012905353044895,0.27125205990897594,0.1016178643564889,0.0,0.14575849236853566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956722563385061,0.0,0.0,0.11714991908350625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795720755415325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852714646931969,0.0,0.0,0.18078211499373675,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SooperDiz,2020/02/26,"I'm so tired I'm exhausted. Physically, emotionally exhausted. I am 36, soon to be 37 and since I was 16 I've always had two jobs except for 1 year when I was in between jobs. Currently I work a full time job of at least 50 hours a week, a part time job that I work 40+ hours a week 6 months a year, and go to school full time. I can barely make ends meet. I haven't had a vacation in 10 years. I'm so stressed out I dont sleep more than 4 hours a night. Please just tell me that things will get better soon.  Things will get better soon, right?",0.4310454545454547,1.9685096500000008,2.4312121212121234,97.06227272727274,81.66666666666666,6.363636363636362,17.575757575757574,7.348242739294969,-0.1618333333333335,418,8,108,6,11,140,77,120,0.11,0.815,0.075,-0.5771,6,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,7,5,0,1,7,0,11,4,1,1,0,6,18,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,4,0,9,2,11,11,5,27,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,19,57,13,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876448353073688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312117452826101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15319578413945134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14703560804788635,0.115773767975956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13658529506339204,0.0,0.0742877540878872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3861807520768072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5188537314551731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725258133204848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433463342225156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266619387200642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14155047748787578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434846721609427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116290050998264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228950300555306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081279360209496,0.0,0.1308083570925194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973239614839018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424975990034755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368108968468704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286610785644864,0.15023646481302386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768854254336712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20970170357988935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903226350358617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525265081173023
mentalhealth,r0s3w4t3r,2020/02/26,"Where is the accountability? I need to manage time better. I promised myself I’d go home from my boyfriends at 9 tonight. I was going to, but we had a bit of time left so I brought something somewhat heavy up. But it was something I felt we could remain kind of surface level about for the time being before we got more time to dive deeper. I said I didn’t want to get too far into it tonight. 

We went deeper and I’m glad it only pushed me back a bit over an hour. But I just wish I could good myself accountable. I want to get up earlier in the morning and for a long while I could, no matter how little sleep I’d gotten. A few months ago I lost that ability. In attempts to do better I’m trying to go to bed earlier so I can wake up earlier. 

No matter what I do in the morning, no matter how badly I need to wake up at a certain time I will push it to the last second. 

I was so close tonight. And I had to mess it up.",0.5876963766199417,2.323095693467337,2.903782068235916,92.89868288812485,82.01507537688444,5.395503834964295,20.523935466807718,6.339386263674448,0.08469246231155791,709,20,163,6,19,243,106,199,0.09300000000000001,0.753,0.154,0.7992,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,4,0,0,4,12,10,0,0,11,0,15,3,3,2,1,29,34,12,0,8,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,7,9,0,0,1,0,2,7,4,3,0,1,13,2,26,7,29,16,5,41,0,1,0,0,5,19,0,1,15,111,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436221947200506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787747242697628,0.1171396801462022,0.0,0.0,0.11937991204977305,0.0,0.0,0.24815739067005094,0.30632955570187176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.336040173616865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470429879949622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659571201887225,0.0,0.2391970423992345,0.11767200145501502,0.11220597601568663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072638121824346,0.0,0.13816138917055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14609467462426978,0.0,0.11435838382859892,0.0,0.0,0.1524299068579521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061150485165452,0.0,0.1241558284443639,0.0,0.0,0.15314753939056078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198138033574016,0.0,0.0,0.20805253589706904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669995464361468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345177822799933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14039537885170458,0.0,0.0,0.21601044331652194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40903297346914863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952504577041878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16549814315142372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005399931370798,0.0,0.0,0.1613312454601932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jeff_Dunkey22,2020/02/26,"Is it normal to feel guilty or disingenuous after adopting an opinion or point of view from another source? Title. Kinda feels like crap, was curious if anyone else experiences this.",6.2231182795698965,9.4074575483871,6.7109677419354865,65.3531182795699,70.29032258064515,9.29462365591398,29.68817204301075,9.725611199111238,3.750152688172044,148,6,20,4,3,48,30,31,0.14,0.737,0.12300000000000001,-0.1567,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,8,4,3,0,2,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,4,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,2,12,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3726389702430144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484846604719753,0.3641210425861403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29686805841383873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476224196021266,0.0,0.0,0.3593739488931326,0.2538781294768755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17361701496700205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34818952111559265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33594180556372705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,81uetOY1,2020/02/26,"Relationship PTSD (m17) my post is not urgent: I am not depressed or suicidal.

I don’t want to tell everything yet, but here’s an overview. About a year ago, I had my first gf that was short lived, only like 3 months. Reason it ended: she liked another guy better, but I didn’t know for a month until after we broke up. I had serious trust issues, and I continue to have difficult thoughts sometimes when she comes to mind. I have SELF diagnosed myself with PTSD, as the symptoms seem to fit. I would like professional advice if I can safely say I have PTSD and maybe some ways to reduce my symptoms",3.9905128205128193,5.543165658119658,5.011623931623934,82.28615384615388,71.90598290598291,8.276923076923078,25.82051282051281,8.841846274778883,1.9065487179487184,470,15,91,9,9,154,89,117,0.076,0.679,0.245,0.9707,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,0,2,4,10,0,0,4,0,12,3,0,1,0,20,17,9,1,3,6,0,0,3,1,1,3,1,0,2,2,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,5,1,17,6,12,11,1,17,0,2,0,0,9,3,0,4,14,60,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14304163634427586,0.1297577586375302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15349304563933042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12946193361373834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609410898168152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607757976814912,0.14857344393273705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964995221670395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155763606133952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451144478397012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14494001885755498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278353787331364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044706665187096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21454281379681275,0.0,0.12925693972560487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470592016063673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780289268037033,0.0,0.2336795368109905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113292044807726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401923554879283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5133340112170266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15050385548400724,0.0,0.15715821170336636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640789781645265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332595945029371,0.15270711245854768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477436703358265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16011685088660751,0.0,0.0,0.3042914258992383,0.0,0.0,0.12794328258303064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162100146497068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633919612071568,0.11619027591657725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398472970524704,0.0,0.0,0.09426444430733463
mentalhealth,Motherfuckingpenguin,2020/02/26,"Rant about my truamatic experiences in my life Firstly I want to introduce myself. 

I am a 22 year old college student. From the UK. I am extremely depressed and suicidal, I have Asperger's syndrome. I identify as a lesbian and I have an alcoholic father that I've cut off from my life for several years.

I will start from when my life started to go down hill. 
My first truamatic memory was when I was about 6 or 7 (I think), I saw my mother naked crying in the dark with a razor in her hand, there was blood dripping down her leg. The second truamatic memory was seeing my mother being physically hit violently by her now ex husband.

3rd truamatic memory was when my dad watched porn when I was sleeping Infront of me. 4th, my dad telling me my mum and uncle was raped by her father and that he is a pedophile (I remember as a child he'd take is top off and tell me to lay on him, but he didn't touch me sexually).

5th Hearing my dad and another woman have sex upstairs for hours extremely loud. (He would sleep with a lot of woman and cheat on them). 6th being threated by a drug addict mother and being around drug addicts as a child in a 22 floor high story flat. 

7th seeing my mother on drugs as a child, and her being aggressive to me even on the streets and no one did anything or said anything. 

8th I was neglected by food from my mother and father. 9th my scizophrinc Grandma being aggressive and constantly in a confused state talking to herself about messed up things. 


10th i used to take photos of myself naked at 14 years old for men online. But I never told a lot of  them my age.

11th at 15 I met a girl online who was a year older than me, he ended up verbally abusing me online. Making fun of my sexuality and disablity, I cut myself for the first time.


12th at 16 My first ex boyfriend threatened to kill himself because I didn't want to be in a relationship with him anymore. I ended up in A&E.

13th I was homeless at 17-18, my mother would verbally and Phsycologically abuse me. I went to stay at a guy's flat that I just met online, his ex girlfriend who he lived with was jealous and angry at me constantly, I cut myself to relief the pain, she found out. I woke up to police officers around me asking me questions. As went to the A&E.

14th later on a few years later at 18-19, him at the time being my boyfriend raped me. 

15th I tried to plan many suicide attempts, wrote suicide notes. I planned to jump a bridge twice. Thought about hanging myself from the door that had a window above the door to tie it around. 

16th at 20-21 I went into a relationship with a girl, she took advantage of my money. Was aggressive towards me. She broke up with me from Facebook messager while she was in Rome with her friends. 

17th I bought sustainable climbing rope online, looked around in a Forrest to see where the most quietest place was to do it and best tree. And looked up how to hang myself for real. There was a breathing technique that could make you pass out to achieve a partial hanging. I considered this.

I suppose college and getting back on my feet again helped.

18th I started using cocaine, I ended up mixing it with weed and I started hallcinating and needed go to hospital. My father (the alcoholic) showed up. I said I didn't want to see him and he left.

19th during college quite reccently last month, I was having a causal relationship with this girl from college in another class. She would emotionally manipulate me, and put me down about everything possible. She was toxic. As I was about to break it up she got raped. I ended up having to cut contact because she was making me stressed and anxious constantly being aggressive towards me.

20th my mother got into Christianity, she told me that being gay is a sin. I had a nervous breakdown in the toilets in my college, I told her I want to die. And I feel ashamed for being gay. She told me that's not what she meant, that for her it's a sin. But I put it into perspective for what it's like to be gay, having old men stare and get aroused by seeing young girls kiss, hold hands and hug etc. 


There has possibly been a lot more truamatic things that have happened that I have forgotten. My mood has always been unstable, I've been on medication since I was 14. I also used LSD, Shrooms, Adderall.

I am on my way to an art school undergrad degree, once I pass my next course for higher national certificate.. accidemically I am exceeding somehow.
But I don't know if I can hold on much longer with having so many breakdowns.. I'm scared I have a severe disorder like bipolar, Scizo personality, scizophrina or something and not aware. 

I'm scare to lose my grip on reality permanently.",4.146388495992458,5.744170293729376,5.2596870972811605,80.48222277227725,71.5852585258526,8.142580543768663,29.157331447430447,8.718089801386295,2.323340141442716,3683,147,694,67,70,1216,396,909,0.166,0.784,0.05,-0.9989,1,0,7,0,1,7,106.0,0,1,2,14,27,40,16,6,45,0,68,34,9,8,1,94,126,49,5,10,11,19,5,2,2,4,13,4,3,13,25,46,3,3,8,2,2,15,8,30,0,7,50,19,136,9,134,58,9,127,3,4,10,12,93,65,0,11,45,480,161,11,0.0,0.13516245939306568,0.0,0.12436064731671265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219135012706579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04561362343189218,0.0474605550500792,0.1236022614966066,0.0,0.0,0.11961956459199828,0.0,0.06443720689863806,0.056566810222857124,0.0,0.0,0.09387555960986486,0.20310523370818506,0.053323245951515726,0.0,0.0,0.04385904302115453,0.0,0.06954021266932299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05985832847450051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849148855667648,0.0,0.04554055664548791,0.0,0.0626540529266859,0.0,0.0,0.049127128639157545,0.0,0.059196900146499865,0.0,0.06537099893691041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843946121817216,0.0,0.0,0.06416057285930551,0.20207652755782746,0.0,0.06361294301125571,0.03767335462729115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051262476025746594,0.05579454350695736,0.0,0.0,0.028840351335415276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19406748689808734,0.06897111345583376,0.0625397103007321,0.04406776070431183,0.0,0.059600466116822924,0.0,0.06483252488278568,0.0,0.09123770920075812,0.0,0.0,0.05647702759262409,0.05043890806876715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428647234085197,0.0,0.03823166700662994,0.06026424820604458,0.0,0.0,0.05617137827914415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310458785280912,0.0,0.03134683739422296,0.046493945059413434,0.0,0.0,0.06197243680434724,0.0,0.12086382046023318,0.055732205685764716,0.0,0.05036599145606239,0.0,0.09579585570393227,0.06381142948819928,0.0,0.14547613731228592,0.0,0.0,0.11422081377514018,0.11565606030095928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746023205060966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04552754219411366,0.0,0.04192981960991116,0.042293283839898416,0.04399156468060224,0.0,0.060661032776441526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17955675770329774,0.06074408182264855,0.03865072613658349,0.0,0.06069292642097804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04980376963218824,0.05959303445271605,0.0,0.0,0.12860455190289266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146787816244388,0.06389611166296699,0.0606674066903045,0.0,0.06492223710676838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18371382994302327,0.0646134385995405,0.0,0.1085132447186954,0.0,0.11421086669474488,0.05772595093662492,0.2272612772347861,0.0,0.0,0.12887441379727613,0.0,0.0471827906811461,0.0,0.11415927389652862,0.0,0.0,0.04391098119605594,0.0,0.0,0.1614884182726737,0.060795392594038725,0.0,0.0,0.06533734542280681,0.0,0.0,0.1871724015943644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577162343259342,0.04584534108374859,0.09970822906866314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578761605398841,0.036547932102251914,0.0,0.04528215364978638,0.0665191513180765,0.0,0.0,0.21801071206370784,0.06337181051807123,0.038725359690462736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14778870754541054,0.0,0.0,0.13457100944431047,0.045274462295911935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862562839060576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155542330679113,0.0,0.0,0.18365444078563448
mentalhealth,JustSomNotCringe,2020/02/26,"Are my thought processes normal? Didn’t know where to post sorry if you guys don’t allow this here.

So i’ve had a really traumatic childhood, my mom was a suicidal addict which I was forced to care for (not even sure if this is related to it) and even shamed for while doing so by my entire family at a very young age (from around 9-14) and always would do this one thing: 

Every-time I heard my mother fall down (she would quite often, methadone was her DOC) I would say to myself “do this x amount of times and she won’t be dead and everything will be okay” these things included stuff like waiting x amount of seconds or not opening the door to go see her for x amount of seconds or even just really weird stuff like tapping a wall every second for 5 seconds or holding my breath for 3 seconds, just weird stuff.

I still sometimes do stuff like this and am not sure if it’s associated with the trauma or not. Something as simple as closing my eyes for 3 seconds and this won’t happen or having to watch a certain video I come across that I don’t even want to watch but I feel like if i don’t something I don’t want to happen will happen.

Anyone have any ideas what it could be? It feels like I have to do these things sometimes (usually not too often just sorta in stressful situations) or something just completely god awful will happen but still even if I do it I know it won’t change the outcome. I’d also like to mention i’m not religious or anything so I don’t believe if I do these things then the problem will be fixed but at the same time I feel like I HAVE to.",4.72673374613003,4.93996887925697,5.394568111455108,85.15110913312697,69.1857585139319,8.19374613003096,27.29551083591331,7.908726449838941,1.4672304643962844,1240,36,261,14,20,402,158,323,0.095,0.797,0.10800000000000001,-0.2047,0,0,4,0,0,1,22.0,0,1,0,1,21,18,0,2,10,2,39,3,2,1,3,62,58,30,2,14,26,2,3,7,0,10,1,2,1,1,26,11,0,2,7,1,0,3,15,6,0,7,7,9,28,12,31,36,4,24,0,0,4,0,11,10,0,16,17,192,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714323283501647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712613666316544,0.0741467956172236,0.0,0.0,0.06059796781212174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06230789917391497,0.0,0.07333007298903814,0.07932693916378933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039664080373152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085375194029126,0.0,0.09426673881944504,0.0767605166604421,0.09343031244778664,0.0,0.0,0.07114721566835007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29428211730956993,0.0,0.07507915717151684,0.0,0.08008647030577687,0.0,0.084005132813962,0.0,0.13517033041899007,0.19098095871022205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050643360225771865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08823307307636741,0.3151992979251571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059452958307123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794523233296712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047430779036788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436474807704607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730904166831213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06038335388793047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534290559649456,0.0,0.0,0.08526639316570153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477962909929104,0.0,0.0,0.11417250679132815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086397970459489,0.0,0.0,0.07100926424925474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001635588549405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205804075278526,0.1762644631447569,0.09975153398694116,0.0,0.0,0.1423269855064672,0.0,0.10207539275773203,0.0,0.4080392773079129,0.09747205717504616,0.0,0.16797055158120744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23680333582033464,0.0,0.0,0.07074351718465256,0.10392170745176224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981422571871242,0.07352521836826185,0.1051189679802755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899039132303342,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kookieandacupoftae,2020/02/26,"Feeling a lot of emotions right now I don’t know if anyone else feels like this. I feel like somehow, I’m feeling all of the emotions. 

Also I went from being in a really good mood to feeling like shit for no reason. Kind of makes me wonder if maybe I’m bipolar or if it’s just normal mood swings.",3.8645238095238095,4.066754142857146,5.162023809523814,86.10589285714286,71.06349206349206,6.934920634920636,26.86111111111111,5.985473137389443,0.9633206349206348,233,7,49,1,4,78,47,63,0.08800000000000001,0.682,0.23,0.7501,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,1,0,3,0,2,2,1,2,1,18,13,5,0,4,5,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,5,4,5,7,11,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,4,29,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229655095584803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244180341864852,0.18231799193741555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486439451451538,0.4003114656682663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4498527210310507,0.381355747261718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492455291341219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18529451992292306,0.09778979412218763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607938171614765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15127609566636666,0.0,0.0,0.11877466002995875,0.0,0.1787621307696927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17434096599464566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11399131604060815,0.1829493809397245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519576490208021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18265028221773685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16494984111410171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929656236885143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AstroHoe94,2020/02/26,"I’m not any of best friend’s best friend. Has anyone else felt like when you meet new friends, they don’t like you as much as you like them? I’ll be in a group setting and realize that the group wouldn’t be different without me in it. I feel like I’m a placeholder for someone better. All the people I consider to be my best friends have their own best friends and i’m just their friend. I do have extreme abandonment issues and I may exaggerate but I can’t shake the feeling that I’ll just never fit in or be missed if I disappeared one day.",4.519962406015036,4.6123961842105325,5.1491478696741835,87.15236842105264,69.6140350877193,8.970426065162908,29.44360902255639,8.841846274778883,1.9603398496240605,431,15,97,7,7,139,70,114,0.185,0.638,0.177,-0.46799999999999997,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,3,4,5,3,18,0,1,5,0,12,0,0,0,2,19,19,9,0,2,7,0,3,4,6,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,4,0,0,2,6,3,0,1,1,3,15,15,9,12,7,11,0,2,0,0,16,4,0,3,8,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077887473498862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933404399244174,0.13677793323810028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5603648499441087,0.11806248397206963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609104715784799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139470323762198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115151137266299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499474141923248,0.0953664352863841,0.12817288314519434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6188117362389474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933056218040302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260869037543053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813169559145243,0.0,0.10295696175158664,0.12892703206134248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045737203045986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254627657044097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310701083779967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12868115165899366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymongoose,2020/02/26,"I need to change I’m going to try and summarize this the best way possible. 

My ENTIRE. LIFE. I have struggled to see positivity. Literally as long as I can remember. I have been in and out of therapy. Numerous anxiety meds and was depressed as a teen. Went through some nice PPA/PPD recently. I don’t want to do self harm or anything like that. But holy shit do I struggle to see the light. 

Everything is so negative. Yadda yadda yadda life is not fair why me the whole deal is how I constantly feel. This entire year has been somewhat traumatic, I won’t go into detail but it’s just been various events and it’s like the hits do not stop coming. It’s a constant roll of getting hit in the face with bullshit. Some big things, but also a lot of little things and they just build up. Like power rangers when they say “it’s morphing time!” (I really try to find humor in anything). I know life has its ups and downs, but what if that’s all you ever feel? Literally the only positive I see in my life is my son. 

My husband and I have been fighting because he’s sick of my “negative ass mindset” and I am too. But I honestly do NOT know how to change it. I expect the worst out of everything, so when something good happens it’s like I hit the jackpot. It’s easier to not be let down or as upset when you just simply expect the worst. I know I need to do something but I don’t know what. I’m afraid it will eventually crumble my marriage because my husband is as optimistic as can be and I feel like an anchor. 

As a mom that works full time while my husband works an opposite shift, I don’t have time to go to therapy. Quite frankly I don’t have the money either, and honestly it never helped change my mindset probably because I couldn’t afford to keep going. Does anyone have anything they can contribute? Thoughts, ideas, processes, tips/tricks? I’m desperate.",1.9502207130730085,4.253674010752693,3.77090548953028,85.46320033955857,80.39784946236558,7.249122807017544,25.38087153367289,8.288913261614885,1.8473107526881725,1460,58,290,31,38,490,180,372,0.15,0.723,0.127,-0.9076,2,0,2,0,2,0,43.0,0,2,3,5,13,21,2,4,16,0,37,8,3,2,3,60,66,35,0,7,17,5,3,5,0,2,5,1,0,1,19,15,0,2,11,0,2,6,13,10,0,0,7,8,38,11,37,50,12,37,0,1,3,1,17,14,2,7,21,199,57,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396741105517526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075764982310456,0.0,0.0,0.06467394898562286,0.0,0.22834402038018836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16915043494811696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706673695765664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935391341200353,0.07967538312840149,0.0,0.19990629000508087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535724315541884,0.07966493877511932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094211468744708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366611009295997,0.0,0.0,0.16625526983464084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030322270193574,0.06607772553511249,0.0,0.0,0.08453783195507224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04832429266363382,0.0,0.21026586607004646,0.07757957116638772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179213063104666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06199677236837903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441445724769248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221290889807628,0.0,0.0,0.2033291137486856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458137229042014,0.26132496440176256,0.22593945935504506,0.092703277861914,0.0,0.08185427127457816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863508339318817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027399725422478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832784418220273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371662444370382,0.07133706780714424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07034584797037853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427307719119824,0.0,0.0,0.09972416603572147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837874456550474,0.0,0.0,0.059254018974165025,0.0,0.09132665739332126,0.0,0.10477766099237254,0.0,0.0,0.07355493395052333,0.0,0.0,0.2211172063791326,0.0,0.09649140463282273,0.0,0.09494375241979733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241278598769744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732911794646534,0.0,0.19338960364257415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115498789066394,0.0,0.12289779517138034,0.0,0.0,0.0734298970455286,0.16180196962204355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12559469662658845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05455535223232029,0.0734174246855011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574285616352237,0.0834614402104079,0.1032662376186486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346734538548727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595630975644061
mentalhealth,palomac2020,2020/02/26,"Project to create Mental Health First Aid Kit for Youth (Anonymous, 9 questions, 2-4 min for completion) Hi! I am a senior at The New School in New York City working on my capstone project for a business class (business is my minor and graphic design my major). I have GAD (general anxiety disorder) among other diagnoses and I am trying to turn them into something good, something helpful. So for my project I would like to create a Mental Health First Aid Kit for Youth to provide information, resources, and tools to help them and their parents through tough times. Your input would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.

[https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/H7857KC](https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/H7857KC)",8.39135135135135,11.833447999999999,6.3858468468468494,69.0495810810811,64.49549549549549,7.322882882882882,34.523423423423424,8.238735603445708,3.1451542342342367,572,26,77,8,10,166,77,111,0.027000000000000003,0.787,0.18600000000000005,0.9556,1,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,0,2,3,3,1,5,0,0,4,0,7,3,0,0,0,10,9,5,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,13,4,16,6,1,14,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,1,10,48,14,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033045347216854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786267839842267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17291913743823592,0.0,0.0,0.19525558878184807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898285327892111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14289593726712696,0.0,0.18783045643732374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621847664988299,0.0,0.0,0.2283871066035112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08323281586829735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3433801646707518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3290834365342965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18917263111085356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19085027162678053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17242071746525905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623140116215512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685124239117368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934249336173392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566815606485692,0.1853106081873472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240293618813597,0.0,0.0,0.2420479635044316,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tommy328,2020/02/26,"TW! Struggling with Mental Health and Completely Lost (Long) Lately I have been feeling like I am worthless and that anything I do is just pointless because I'll never really get anywhere in life and that I should just die because it will make things easier for myself and the people around me. I know this isn't true, but it gets so hard to ignore waking up every morning and the only thing I can think is ""Why haven't I died yet?"". I don't plan on doing anything, but it does worry me because this is not the first time I've felt like this but before I actually had plans and it wasn't too hard to decide what I was going to do. 

I started college last September and my mental health spiraled out of control. I've become extremely anxious and depressed. Without meaning to, I lost 10 lbs in the first semester, which is a lot given that I wasn't overweight and I'm 5'1. I started controlling my food because it was the only thing I felt I could control. I hate eating in general, if I didn't have to to survive I don't think I ever would. I see myself as fat and unshapely, even though I know I'm not. My clothes from middle school almost fall off of me. 

There are times when I am just laying in bed, seemingly ok, and then my heart will start racing and I can't breathe and I feel like I'm going to pass out or just something bad in general is going to happen. Sometimes the feeling passes quickly, other times my whole day is shot because it lasts for hours. I can't ever risk getting bored because I become so extremely depressed that I can't even move in my bed and my brain feels like depressed, sad, mush and it also ruins my day or night. 

I don't really do much with friends given that all of my friends live on campus and I commute (I also hate being on campus). I try to find time to do things with my boyfriend but between work, class, and practice schedules, its almost impossible. I know he worries about me because over the years he's seen me go from decently happy and ok to the mess I am now, and I feel horrible that he worries. I don't want to cause him to feel the way I do. 

There's been a lot of things in my life that I feel have contributed to my mental health degrading; child abuse (mental, physical, and emotional), sexual assault, death in the family with horrible situations around it (threats of murder, pitting family members against each other, etc.), domestic violence, parental divorce, living with someone with mental illness, and several others. 

It's hard to tell others that I'm not ok because they see the achievements I've made, Dean's List first semester with 18+ credit hours, passing auditions with ease, and just appearing to manage college well. I also come from a family where, for almost my entire life, it wasn't ok to talk about how you feel or if you do you're punished and scrutinized, so I don't know how to deal with anything like this. 

I know I need help and I **want** to get help because I can't keep living my life like a zombie and just feeling so out of place everywhere I go. There's just something that is stopping me from reaching out to anyone. My college has free counseling services for students. I haven't been diagnosed with anything seeing as I have not gone to someone who can do it properly.  My mom is getting frustrated because I haven't gotten help yet, and makes comments like ""I'm not going to talk to you about anything like that because you refuse to make appointments."" and it honestly hurts. I do take birth control because my body can't regulate it's natural functions and I know that depression and anxiety are frequent side effects.  What are some things I can do to make myself want to *ACTUALLY* take the steps to get better?",5.176469540229885,6.027352611034484,5.844073275862068,80.06565014367818,68.40689655172415,8.579597701149424,31.517959770114945,8.72156446121922,2.54887183908046,2933,119,545,46,48,955,301,725,0.19,0.6859999999999999,0.124,-0.9963,1,0,2,0,3,0,83.0,0,4,1,16,37,45,7,2,16,4,62,18,6,13,5,130,130,52,4,9,22,2,14,8,2,4,11,0,2,1,43,47,4,8,24,0,3,15,25,24,1,3,20,18,83,22,79,104,8,73,0,10,4,0,25,24,0,13,41,371,126,14,0.0,0.05686452938664776,0.09366959722756583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14417587524305125,0.0,0.0,0.11514131549787658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036714947686412334,0.054219070320780084,0.0,0.03355821822258285,0.0,0.19747308321015325,0.0854489004021007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040072624074980835,0.3510771986226222,0.1060102490303438,0.040838990952545534,0.0,0.0,0.04244641019737117,0.0,0.05331003399098713,0.0,0.05357669362890877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04930261414239746,0.0,0.04134220866248906,0.05032034228879169,0.0,0.21531546719878544,0.03831895828590556,0.0,0.0,0.06190376111090023,0.04947926058488883,0.165347157056914,0.04871246064052186,0.0996194914799484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041999494242767055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049109401043502914,0.0,0.05398630355211356,0.0,0.0,0.05352551416240775,0.06339859724118356,0.08682585876914199,0.04043665046861585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573219204130307,0.0,0.2184029074431439,0.10285984239120068,0.09216270217468428,0.0,0.043865251114370785,0.1224699117039964,0.058034012188746674,0.0,0.07415942221905626,0.0,0.1504479485876471,0.0,0.16365510214725548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04244055313858816,0.05109004491956397,0.12897842844256355,0.09476742331021468,0.0,0.15304475355400698,0.0,0.05687260843288131,0.09650722967433258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452799261528594,0.0,0.05137810651369372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042658887864235405,0.0,0.0,0.1582560569720184,0.07824232607202296,0.05413883446449239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355971039336494,0.18757786221007192,0.0,0.12713759785527454,0.04247279686745936,0.0,0.0,0.1047812964205918,0.08160482945138332,0.0,0.04541267389690785,0.12814431562627618,0.0,0.0,0.05227906468017048,0.0,0.0,0.24183113858977154,0.0,0.0,0.056209486070758465,0.0,0.05100956679482027,0.035280794239631263,0.03558662209271879,0.03701559787795724,0.0,0.0,0.0450387118187032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300254134063727,0.0,0.0,0.05329117692680427,0.0,0.0,0.03327269667202342,0.0,0.0501430630086602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061491816426491375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048572052449295716,0.11473397837649232,0.043691541236232284,0.0,0.054219070320780084,0.0,0.0,0.0539467805939414,0.0,0.0,0.0813295878029389,0.07389558585518795,0.04746686533747324,0.0,0.10191028205285274,0.0,0.0,0.040124771344706524,0.0,0.0501732971529155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721703796028059,0.07715082300230648,0.041948493297810516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19130876160131927,0.061504680171758815,0.047153436280470064,0.0,0.11194174038818028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032584481874851086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492354854482735,0.03809505987463028,0.0,0.0,0.043151980876090484,0.0,0.04330672964433556,0.05358310403779543,0.0,0.04626408630602714,0.0,0.03493988865791565,0.14621939203221646,0.0,0.03409325326856772,0.0,0.0,0.030906283865914493
mentalhealth,nikola-tesla-ate-me,2020/02/26,"Why can’t I seem to accept the fact that my friends and loved ones care about me? Any tips to try and fix this? So, I’m just gonna put it out there that I haven’t been officially diagnosed with any mental illness, I think I may have a slight anxiety problem seeing as I had frequent panic attacks as a child and still struggle with anxiety today. So I don’t know if this is the anxiety, or some other issue but I can’t really accept or believe the fact that my loved ones care about me. They reaffirm this often, and they show that they care, but I can’t help but think they all just pity me, and it’s all a lie. Usually thinking about this makes me spiral and it more or less ruins the next couple of days for me, and no one seems to notice or care which just makes it worse. 
Anyways, I’m really sorry this is so rambly and probably written weirdly, but any advice for helping this is very much appreciated. Thank you in advance",4.6573508771929815,5.0143719105263225,5.614473684210527,83.01048245614038,69.36842105263158,8.438596491228072,27.41228070175439,8.344100000000001,1.6937543859649122,733,22,151,10,12,242,108,190,0.14400000000000002,0.65,0.20600000000000002,0.9663,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,4,1,13,17,1,2,7,0,12,4,0,2,4,41,32,22,0,2,12,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,16,11,0,0,8,1,0,2,6,7,0,3,3,1,20,10,15,27,6,10,0,2,1,2,11,2,0,10,6,107,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525775077844462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24062674331493156,0.0,0.2706904671175351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418326201222272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328873865388844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4810247656074431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050759254708078,0.0,0.0760669203660762,0.0,0.0,0.11971508024334684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112659332968824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811656938984606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310742089714725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482132193106245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21290596005130788,0.0,0.157462862953458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188641829254318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670559971534253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254393955224687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134284964531583,0.0,0.0,0.23977453899995696,0.0,0.0,0.1383869612150036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127168257446851,0.11286063016329452,0.0,0.11857065720623113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112145108274094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939895545367866,0.2147514741105064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203350778123474,0.0,0.0,0.09419369506040848,0.0,0.0,0.12330521217271476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859098274090702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267295972720321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180123305541108,0.0,0.0,0.08007917914724927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299034306548157,0.09731973137188814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064300293246902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019943299664268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bear919,2020/02/26,"I have no idea whats wrong with me but I cannot stop bouncing between being normal and extreme bouts of emptiness. I feel like I've changed. I have always been a happy and outgoing kid, but things changed junior year of Highschool.  I started to feel so depressed. I snapped in and out of it sometimes I was in for months sometimes just a week. when I was out I was super happy and outgoing and even more so sometimes than before everything hit. I don't know why it started, it just did. During senior year when i fell in it would generally amount to an excruciating body contorting panic attack. this happened about every month.During the summer I was so happy and I was always surrounded by my great friends and wonderful girlfriend but  i  still couldn't kick the panic attacks. during college things have been bad. I am still super outgoing, im kind of known for it. but I can't remember the last time I've been happy for a month without going through at least a week of sadness. Another thing is that when i drop its getting more severe. I've had some pretty dark thoughts but have never done anything (except one time i ran until I passed out but I dont know if that counts). In all honesty I am still the outgoing passionate kid but i also feel like i am also this sad, empty lazy, unfocused person half the time. Before, I hated the other half the fallen in half, but now im not so sure about the passionate talkative half either.

for the record I run track and get plenty of excursive and sleep and my diet is good. I try to be a good person and am involved in volunteer work and am passionate about so much. Still, things just seem to get worse. THough I hate when people know about the other side as i try to keep it hidden best I can a couple peopple from home no but no one from college. I am lonely and I want to tell someone here about when I get sad, but I'm afraid they wont like that side. Who likes things like that I dont even like that side of me. 

I dont know whats wrong with me. I dont know if I am making this up, I dont know if this is just normal things that people go through and I am just being weak. I just want to feel happy about things  and I have no idea what to do or how to fix it.",2.756676985355398,4.323009612334804,3.9584010001190637,88.5375038695083,75.12334801762114,6.582116918680796,23.28348612930111,7.2228458231874715,0.8074482200261941,1740,50,362,19,37,568,197,454,0.198,0.584,0.218,0.9299,0,2,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,1,4,34,39,4,3,17,0,43,7,2,2,3,76,74,45,0,9,24,0,4,6,2,2,1,0,1,4,31,20,1,2,17,0,0,7,17,16,0,6,13,4,46,23,50,54,9,50,0,5,0,3,10,15,0,7,33,264,77,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281206226234747,0.10697500381876364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740493956257737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05289834019617682,0.0,0.0,0.14625936738363438,0.0,0.0,0.05367251238529433,0.0,0.0,0.1093979392815429,0.0,0.06745965054968121,0.0,0.0,0.07140244807247717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13600297438679962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112644915041055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05536571125467697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578247018449147,0.376688213407114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491487827876515,0.0,0.054160082430230516,0.0,0.05777222330024531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001098242467293,0.09184568088779917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049663861544116665,0.0,0.13433808525247296,0.0,0.0730655129253963,0.10783283593764244,0.0,0.07087077204733765,0.0,0.0,0.056844071646204135,0.34214518415111456,0.0,0.1269296887526665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447975979998186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451323701411053,0.13887047649658493,0.0,0.0,0.05713650503525584,0.0,0.06693947109476453,0.2119651601049429,0.052398143521836464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842867228707808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04290851626466431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539270556866182,0.0,0.047254426419553984,0.0,0.0495779894981755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12596478361784685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711785127030677,0.0,0.0,0.15084138735281513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912963727455488,0.11225655580661548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539757170149373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281860519368033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851962136910289,0.0,0.07261999408539123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432809702784996,0.0,0.054465653415613116,0.0,0.19072865652244028,0.0,0.09099779882039404,0.0,0.20534171020238567,0.053742357448971066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605847165992213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056185016031352765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29894121316980954,0.0,0.06315641790857507,0.05103246848352712,0.11244948239801944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728607359098582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582999310695993,0.0,0.10312576225731067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058004212023974,0.0,0.0,0.06196523942650627,0.06971073291618987,0.046797823951429854,0.0,0.0655085171068472,0.04566385657421045,0.1405638378895449,0.0,0.08279058044578587
mentalhealth,2Personal2NotThrow,2020/02/26,"Had a weird experience today and I don't know what it was Something happened to me today that I don't think I've had happen before, at least not as strongly. I don't want a diagnosis or anything, I'm just not sure what that could have been and am pretty confused right now. 

So: Everything was pretty normal, nothing too stressful going on or something. 

However, suddenly, I got very nervous and angry. I was just putting some glasses away, and the sound of glass on glass made me so annoyed all of a sudden. I began to breathe more heavily and had this urge to choke myself to calm myself down. After a few seconds, it got too much and I had to rush outside, to somehow get away. I think I hyperventilated, my entire body was prickling, there were tears all of a sudden. It got better after a few minutes of controlled breathing.


But I wasn't really afraid of anything during this, I didn't feel like I was going crazy or dying or something similar - which, according to google, seems to be what panic attacks are.

So, what was that? A milder sort of panic attack? Or something else entirely? Should I even worry about this at all?

Thanks in advance",4.841636363636365,6.2616893000000005,5.595227272727271,79.43784090909091,69.63636363636364,7.5,29.65909090909091,7.865858978985527,2.061863636363636,906,35,161,11,16,295,128,220,0.20199999999999999,0.725,0.07400000000000001,-0.9773,1,0,4,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,4,12,16,3,6,8,0,23,3,3,2,4,35,41,16,1,4,10,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,14,6,0,1,5,0,0,5,7,10,0,1,19,2,18,6,26,19,9,23,0,0,0,0,0,9,0,10,10,124,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20024479414981405,0.0,0.0,0.2768298287394529,0.2286221818124361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353050658397442,0.0,0.0,0.10760545860477733,0.0,0.13514571972429631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13646100744970727,0.0971419976492516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12627217492397566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163800176147994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803605664096847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934735304956526,0.11901465009279642,0.0,0.0,0.0615189964285621,0.0869196433891894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356650824983216,0.0,0.1382934562874432,0.0,0.2919270421428176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151812208704065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686555081365661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05944083902903465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512520324860387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943997917476257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920880727135097,0.11674372724128396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855023659316997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24756019252584754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230994475650553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794363617848635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390380707242802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076197751501464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37466388172013937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937028273235855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467064995843387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201554763244577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591988310550106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306540751466445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038884196374397,0.07176293860909486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12355975973293518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clittle24,2020/02/26,Online Therapy Suggestions I am a college student and don’t have access to any therapy in the area. I was looking for a therapist that accepts a Health Savings Account and can’t find anything about accepting HSA.,6.083846153846152,8.156432769230772,7.028717948717951,67.8246153846154,67.46153846153847,10.328205128205127,43.769230769230774,10.504223727775694,5.673984615384616,174,12,25,5,3,58,33,39,0.0,0.86,0.14,0.5994,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,5,1,0,0,0,6,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,2,3,4,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,18,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109781297284062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553062785874484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28355950692773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3297773199603144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26052876302961675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7095873878723057,0.3602198783627061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JElijahWood,2020/02/26,"Schizoaffective help It's a long story but I'm schizoaffective, when my brain isnt having paranoid delusions/hallucinations its fabricating emotional turmoil and conflicts with other people. 

I've had mixed results with drugs. Seroquel worked well but made me feel like I couldn't breethe.

My psychiatrist told me that I am beyond her help and that I need to see a specialist and/or in patient care. Only problem is that I cant find any psychosis/schizophrenia/schizoaffective specialists. A regular shrink alone has a 2 month wait.

Anyone know of where I can find help?",5.612800000000004,8.758170680000003,4.948,77.39900000000002,72.2,8.0,31.0,8.841846274778883,3.0686000000000004,468,21,73,10,10,141,77,100,0.121,0.6579999999999999,0.221,0.8577,0,1,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,1,4,0,9,2,1,2,0,17,18,5,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,3,2,10,3,6,14,0,6,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,4,42,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21438787542401333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14076598432576248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14473806754839766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310786302790769,0.0,0.0,0.21104862561093135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24005238210103286,0.0,0.0,0.23284529584934285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046645913498854,0.14787967105691474,0.0,0.0,0.3783855052558608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4162399158043615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137608861910354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112894370266053,0.0,0.0,0.18318703636758701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19586685498161435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16522411753909924,0.0,0.0,0.15348666243576264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743158188081846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350660057368256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980694765390547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649508942162088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19779580545561476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18611638679575992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069727275626674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pancakeking1012,2020/02/26,"Spacey, disassociative feeling Starting towards the end of December I started getting really bad “spaciness.” Every time I described this feeling to people, people get confused. Its not the feeling of like “spacing out” in class and then someone snaps their fingers and you’re back, the only thing I can relate it to is when you get really really high (on weed). Like uncomfortably high, except this feeling is happening throughout 90% of my day. I hate this feeling, I have a little over a quarter of high school left and I wanna be able to experience it, but I get panic attacks every day because of the spacey feeling and just end up in the nurse’s office. I’m doing everything I can to stop the feeling, so any advice is helpful, honestly. 

To clarify, I am also on two anti-anxiety meds. One is Cymbalta at 60mg that has worked very well for me, and I got another, Buspirone, from my psychiatrist back in December, but I feel this has made it worse. After starting it I’ve felt even spacier and have had panic attacks every single day. I’m just so tired and don’t know what to do. Of course I’m diagnosed with clinical anxiety and depression, and all this anxiety has thrown me into a depression and I daily consider ending it all because of how tired I am.

What has made this worse is I keep trying to go in and see my psychiatrist again but he keeps pushing my fucking appointments back and won’t answer my calls or call me back. I’m looking at another 2 weeks before seeing him again and I don’t know what to do in the meantime. These panic attacks are so bad when I don’t feel real I can’t do anything, not school, work, hanging out with friends, anything. 

I’ve also been seeing my counselor at school to account for the fact that I can’t afford a therapist. She has told me to try “grounding techniques” like finding ultra sensory objects and focusing on them, but it doesn’t help, it just makes stuff work because my brain kinda thinks “well you wouldn’t be doing these grounding techniques if you weren’t having a panic attack.” 

I’m not trying to self-diagnose but when I look it up online everything points to “disassociative identity disorder,” and it freaks me out but would honestly make sense. I’ve heard that this can come on due to past trauma or PTSD, which I have none of. 

ANY advice will help, thank you so much.",6.030290178571428,6.643750377232141,6.743303571428572,75.21419642857144,66.43303571428572,9.525,33.1875,9.516144504307137,3.1470303571428584,1851,77,328,35,28,611,217,448,0.184,0.7170000000000001,0.099,-0.9944,2,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,0,4,2,3,23,26,6,5,13,0,40,7,2,5,3,70,85,35,0,4,16,0,11,3,1,4,4,1,0,0,28,22,0,3,15,0,1,4,13,17,2,3,9,17,40,9,49,70,5,59,0,2,5,1,17,30,1,5,28,228,68,7,0.06397303117399515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250274113343779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231841983404873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870077098540609,0.13416260219455306,0.14681758123865962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528870760136376,0.0,0.0,0.2911142336282396,0.0,0.1967652486130035,0.1068296177499773,0.11699209808237873,0.0,0.05443633769268338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141505994185016,0.13064723488465088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055107101797096616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237719382512114,0.0,0.11019975601912234,0.12986256003975588,0.0,0.0,0.07331863608889892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699833522555577,0.0,0.0,0.04225358374639735,0.0,0.16170011369490306,0.0,0.1149896708286482,0.06257789995041776,0.0,0.0,0.29112018062478096,0.04570234625311817,0.06142414223800261,0.0,0.05847019152385315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04942540519306349,0.05914203647266771,0.1336930735956907,0.0,0.03635734787526338,0.0,0.05116507707746013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056571140192984,0.0,0.0,0.06316012390676817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286393229069208,0.2027730593953912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372433898135215,0.0,0.0,0.0703158097878547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950688555310869,0.0,0.0,0.0937619748869797,0.06411778355465463,0.0,0.0,0.10744246833308736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210656578000341,0.08540499013473997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105961594677745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04702753874419454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043349781558559015,0.0486543729430135,0.0,0.30023427329242464,0.0,0.0,0.0610694969549393,0.08870168972045048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06047519237047794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478105001759243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728153149549122,0.12294828567943596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942323687156464,0.15293466968822028,0.0,0.06673782351415325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05420414171339325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358413221970146,0.0,0.0,0.053484318584174115,0.0,0.0,0.07323381528061286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05889777205721266,0.0,0.07427761991395535,0.04250083930085183,0.040991335258513034,0.0,0.0,0.03730318893504548,0.14705517704290105,0.0,0.06112897279077505,0.0,0.1303004666012655,0.0,0.062492355811999474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052784450516363005,0.0,0.0,0.05131530681402405,0.0,0.115038875755213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397193858293774,0.0,0.13038796827051044,0.04544460587007361,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LeMurillo117,2020/02/26,"2015-2020 worst years Hello young redditors

I am in need of help, like, mental help

I've been going through my worst years until now and I don't know what to do to feel slightly better with myself

I just feel like I don't want to be here anymore, I don't want to continue living 

I hope I can get some tips because I don't want to kill myself just yet",0.4867105263157896,2.5152550394736863,2.2439473684210505,95.89513157894736,84.13157894736842,4.852631578947369,17.394736842105264,5.985473137389443,-0.4640999999999997,277,6,63,2,8,91,48,76,0.146,0.613,0.24100000000000002,0.8307,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,1,5,7,1,0,0,0,9,0,0,0,0,13,19,2,1,5,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,2,11,4,10,17,3,9,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,9,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429313435983796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493234038769388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21664440110249372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24771505666164376,0.17499720116668174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797982824033255,0.0,0.13921460584926534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32837878598194503,0.0,0.0,0.2432973934522739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710084279793883,0.0,0.1346218621084885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393470580293262,0.0,0.21630135989428148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468588601208022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18163237820792946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4334456371797521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154883217355984
mentalhealth,I_am_big_gay_,2020/02/26,"I feel like I'm about to have a breakdown I feel like I'm underwater.  I feel like I'm one small, tiny thing away from a breakdown. My mental health has been getting...  quite hectic lately and I started self harm and I feel like I won't be able to stop myself before everything gets out of hand and I break.  I don't want to do anything right now. But I'm going to sleep now,  and hopefully I feel okay tomorrow",0.8733591731266159,2.9813680930232596,2.6808527131782967,92.86169250645996,83.18604651162791,5.682687338501292,20.020671834625325,6.937597516519254,0.2803633074935403,320,9,71,4,9,106,53,86,0.083,0.705,0.213,0.8714,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,2,1,7,3,2,0,0,14,22,5,0,2,1,0,6,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,5,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,6,11,6,9,19,0,12,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,10,38,12,0,0.16979407215652187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13972605399226418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952712007011918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14448224948086427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525999636693069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4292649231168618,0.4852036763003161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17742078941978834,0.0,0.09649788411247974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18048315877361434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16864382537308176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19153510910176985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33181122810324376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711124887417962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150568575983854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18059689610392168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450032098826212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17713224797041752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16991669540479445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018111819767945,0.0,0.0,0.1419554471981186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280363682212105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014894297063293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NaturalClothes,2020/02/26,"I'm picking up the pieces of my life, but I've done horrible things and I don't know how to accept that and move on. I spent years in a self destructive mode with drugs and self harm and whatever else and I'm now sober and really trying to better myself. I'm still young so I know I have a lot of time for that and a lot of leeway, but there's some shit in my past I don't know if I can ever get past. The motives for my actions probably came from some deep seated self hatred I've had since a little kid, and that self hatred is probably not helping me forgive myself, but even if that wasn't the case, I just feel like I threw away any chance at self love.

I can't say what I did, but I did it knowingly and on more than one occasion. I was young, angry, confused and everything else, but that's no excuse. I didn't kill or rape anyone, so there's no one I can really apologize to or make up to. I know that the only way forwards is to forgive myself, accept it and move on in a different path but fuck I don't know how or if I ever can. The guilt just fucking kills me daily and my self hatred and depression just spirals that further and further. I know that overall, deep down I am a good person, but jesus fucking christ did I fuck up. This isn't something I can ever tell a therapist or a future partner so it's just always going to be haunting me.

For the good of me and everyone else I just want to be ok and to move on. I meditate, I'm in therapy, I got sober and I work out 6 days a week. I just really want to fucking forgive myself.",2.53913654618474,3.348250765060243,4.519457831325305,87.29898594377514,74.48192771084337,7.702008032128515,24.074297188755022,8.07648339933343,1.175644176706827,1202,34,268,18,24,414,150,332,0.22399999999999998,0.645,0.132,-0.991,1,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,3,19,25,10,2,15,1,23,10,1,5,3,69,50,36,2,5,21,0,1,1,1,0,2,1,0,9,14,20,0,0,14,0,1,8,10,14,0,2,12,2,38,11,34,36,6,43,2,1,0,7,18,21,6,12,16,185,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671239766543923,0.0,0.0,0.05485842702795934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05640640212053314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579220440635914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134613841192611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226509141687304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052025533936797166,0.0,0.06948102971810137,0.0,0.0,0.08428307357863134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255350942380729,0.0,0.0,0.0935516925445688,0.0,0.2021685247833012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05328183317339255,0.21891214269968606,0.0,0.07708372737913939,0.07250107463698567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04078922102154505,0.057630727923732326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37289098834605455,0.042146792130803835,0.0,0.045846670799419495,0.13532448709827735,0.06451923977637619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0540714604138884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849900311310998,0.0,0.3103391996686604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056979669779622724,0.03941133083464452,0.08085262228433071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716565028815095,0.07280790517539833,0.0,0.053847911029824114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572186149042845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932828055339024,0.061353238055853763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540174565199344,0.0,0.07043801039756609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17395200072895456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550379746684768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06415209288186187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5049389798761789,0.0,0.08280668741928766,0.06673113150127488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210377593699465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442323753102916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050921373753062,0.0,0.09225327759721824,0.09366419133878716,0.0535936228024737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04703937780998523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05476969531967637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516261753330284,0.06403216201294483,0.0647086797019769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05872878579586749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05194889264469245
mentalhealth,CStellarTucker,2020/02/26,"Hyper-Self-Awareness Cause Conflct? Anyone hyper-self-aware (PTSD related) and at the really good side of changing negative behaviours, but run into friends or ex ones where they do not even realise that many of their behaviours are self-destructive, plus they continue to do it to feel part of (toxic) group?

Does it make you question yourself or feel better not to mix amongst negative/triggering behaviours?",12.575523809523807,10.818463028571431,10.704285714285714,59.877380952380975,54.42857142857143,15.047619047619053,47.61904761904761,13.5591,6.698190476190478,332,17,48,10,3,102,54,70,0.032,0.8220000000000001,0.146,0.8514,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,3,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,13,6,5,0,0,5,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,4,3,9,6,1,6,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,3,1,31,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14610848541898694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18480661470988008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21465771012523055,0.22105014961028305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18286079587040288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380149708658273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113111661383136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614406460454134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17526428833184782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139481272121059,0.21185089502661328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14159553600834196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262814505649503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442610430736299,0.0,0.23408109197729096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386402257928842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6539671633467012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,waiting_thru_limbo,2020/02/26,"What am I? I don’t expect you to read this, let alone care. I don’t mind I really don’t. I only created this so that I could say what I wanted to someone, anyone. 
I don’t know what it is, I’ve had it also got as I can remember, earliest ‘real’ memory is around ten getting enjoyment from beating another kid with a chair. The power and adrenaline I can remember to this day. I had the usual ‘ADHD and Anger management issues’. But it wasn’t always like that. The older I got the more distinct the changes became, rage induced psychosis was bad, but it was the clinical, cold and calculated part of me which really horrified me. The ability to take someone’s weakness and pressure it until they break, no exhilaration only a task to be completed. These contrasting episodes have made it difficult for me to have social circles and relationships. Psychologists have diagnosed me with everything under the sun and given all forms of medication, I’ve tried seeking help and it doesn’t work. Most days are filled with depression knowing that sooner or later I’ll just be one of those two others again. Unable to stop myself from hurting those I love. 

I’m so lonely.
Thank you.",4.185618776671409,6.351731189189197,5.710085348506402,74.93498577524896,72.69369369369369,9.17818871503082,28.35087719298246,9.682069395223575,3.062563963963965,932,37,160,25,19,315,140,222,0.179,0.723,0.098,-0.9611,1,3,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,1,3,6,14,2,1,10,0,23,5,0,2,2,30,36,15,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,21,11,0,1,5,1,0,1,7,9,0,3,9,2,21,5,20,23,5,12,0,3,0,1,9,2,0,2,9,119,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680413148733688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14481552872054546,0.0,0.11181722809747732,0.11634479592684792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661768932779498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776821444102753,0.0,0.0,0.12447303314573285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674722650027118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14255991969295914,0.0,0.14791528614744576,0.0,0.14660283758229395,0.0,0.0,0.11163811219071504,0.0,0.0,0.18034986693434807,0.0,0.12043023411681007,0.14191844949168755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566482430783266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305228584231661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22366010356588925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372110147334116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14968451846541891,0.0,0.0,0.14593996227651254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15368726285373988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297954637457022,0.0,0.06831095938744809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261966482276154,0.13230488014722774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085800228807802,0.0,0.0,0.14118241325199946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474838294748916,0.21268495452265604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514158012070249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13986187064914626,0.15915036011128147,0.17914971095538662,0.0,0.0,0.1501186829856725,0.316786743014836,0.0,0.0,0.11119368259496612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425329924541134,0.2369448976098265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689915189199608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051302709592192,0.0,0.0,0.1287311829724526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949313396277516,0.0,0.13658776231127331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539964173661986,0.0,0.08247183695464441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179356079620262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chankler,2020/02/26,"Meaningful coincidences are not necessarily psychotic/schizo Hi. I am not diagnosed but I just found out it is common for schizophrenics and in general to think that if they see meaningful coincidences/synchronicities, it is a sign of their illness. I am on the spiritual path for 5 years now and I just feel like these mental health conditions are partly true and partly fictional. It's like the saying: The psychotic drowns in the same waters in which the mystic swims with delight. 

I think this because I saw this example where they said they found meaningful messages in things around them and they just think they are crazy and they get medicated like for example about their life through the radio, like the song was spot on about their life. Well... I have this so many times! I believe the inner and outer world are interconnected so, whenever you are in alignment, you automatically experience these things more. So, I really think it is dangerous spirituality is not considered in these psych wards. It is really not that special too even, I've had them for years, the craziest ones. I could have also been thinking I'm crazy... but how do you know you are crazy if you live in a world that is totally disconnected with spirit! I'm not saying don't take your symptoms seriously... I am just saying, it could be partly true. It's like you take a psychedelic together with your ego. You might have spiritual experiences but your ego might think it's just an hallucination. Who are you gonna listen to?",6.254014598540144,8.048224510948906,6.677817518248175,71.58716423357667,66.66423357664233,10.58948905109489,29.75839416058394,10.686352973137794,3.428121751824817,1212,44,213,35,20,393,139,274,0.078,0.789,0.133,0.9425,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,11,11,0,18,11,1,0,13,0,29,9,0,1,3,50,49,16,1,4,15,0,1,5,0,3,8,6,0,0,21,11,1,0,13,3,0,1,6,2,1,1,7,9,33,9,24,36,6,22,1,0,2,0,30,16,0,4,10,158,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108700239583603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139649910189588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943330787429633,0.0,0.0,0.12832800567371155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188218695096933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156076426576552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523087808007756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22283508021156045,0.0,0.0,0.05759202960729905,0.08137126686289597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497742697640966,0.0,0.0,0.059508841783661726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107198683083538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259729523774482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16090402056115816,0.2782326403209561,0.0,0.10057712672787553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547826119817453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474379583709518,0.11478593972041518,0.24166302072670956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718261605462066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3700327315023884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14593645745520664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834642633061403,0.2717371751721508,0.0,0.0,0.0907647625708783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838728879796873,0.17127953188732878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513422141389827,0.4379009596461573,0.0,0.0,0.06641689082786455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241114325773044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14669768572825762
mentalhealth,ecstatictiger,2020/02/26,"Who gets job in behavioural health and then belittles people seeking help? I have crap insurance so I've been on a waitlist for therapy for four months. I finally get a call from the office yesterday. I'm at work so I can't immediately pick it up. They don't leave a voicemail because my mailbox was full (I was unaware of this). When I call back the receptionist tells me she doesn't make the appointments, the therapists do and she has no way to look up who called me. Then she tells me that if I want therapy I should have had my mailbox clear because I'm on a waitlist. Cause obviously I should be up to date on everything while I'm already struggling or I don't deserve to not be struggling? She says she will try and figure out who called me and call me back. Ok. 

I have anxiety and abandonment issues. So, me being me, 24 hours pass and I call to check in since I haven't heard anything. The receptionist obviously recognized my number on caller ID because she picks up with ""I haven't called you yet have I?"" No. No she hasn't. But I'm just checking in. This all devolves into us going back and forth. Mainly I just want to know how I can make sure I'm still on the waitlist or get in contact with anyone who can help me. She just keeps telling me she will call me and until then Ill just have to deal with no further information. She again reiterates that if I wanted therapy I'd have been available for a voicemail. I ask for her supervisor and she hangs up on me. 

Why work here and treat people looking for help like trash? I just have anxiety and I've been going without therapy for a while now and will deal for a while longer. I can't imagine if I was suicidal or just even in a worse place mentally. This woman is actually a danger to have in this kind of position. 

I reported her to the main location of this practice. They were able to schedule me for an appointment. For August. But I can work back from there. The main location actually encouraged me to call here and there to check for cancellations if I wanted to. 


Tldr: don't try to make an appointment at Einstein behavioral health in Elkins park because their receptionist will make your mental health worse for no reason.",3.704490267238537,5.462811801385686,4.8228479049818525,82.52003233256353,73.01847575057738,8.366585285384362,28.07581656219069,9.002800196639251,2.285950894094358,1742,68,344,37,35,572,188,433,0.106,0.8290000000000001,0.065,-0.9623,1,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,1,2,3,3,24,11,2,2,19,1,40,5,1,9,5,61,64,34,1,10,17,0,0,1,0,6,4,2,2,1,12,18,0,2,5,0,3,4,16,5,0,1,9,4,59,6,56,46,5,53,0,1,2,0,48,25,1,7,24,250,71,5,0.0675743128370939,0.0,0.1318855632343763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456993455746871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338832872269807,0.0,0.0,0.0472495307167284,0.0,0.05560790176032812,0.0,0.06317286064097358,0.0,0.0,0.20784190183329246,0.0,0.16477069561358665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6210083580099972,0.0,0.0,0.06941743348484973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393322987138485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0446321963203778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060731435161135126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402435670671947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591436829141766,0.0,0.07680807847194178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154850038855137,0.0,0.0,0.1358809124679677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665470863357844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053002624428202,0.06705707860329355,0.06006315410173552,0.0,0.07036824820441191,0.037137075114314515,0.0,0.0,0.07155144033396002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0330133959418201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349080751516602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18042551416759528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619802738358094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05393717181001868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369504024353753,0.0,0.07060077445542598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947764808244282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05373780580237612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589816987252523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396493352100157,0.0,0.0,0.1412866874672681,0.0,0.07391533048899734,0.0,0.06368799013981745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17718878363406945,0.0,0.30910846355590504,0.07845898549357293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175704544399134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128357813733438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15942832200557205,0.053637344204725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06097530682347401,0.0,0.0,0.06513922617998155,0.0,0.14758471365475787,0.0,0.1377279956321054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ecfinwf,2020/02/26,"Finding Motivation. So I’ve missed a lot of school recently, and I NEED to get back into doing the work. The problem is, it’s sooooo overwhelming! Any advice on how to get caught up?",1.779166666666665,4.2677952500000025,3.653333333333337,84.90000000000002,82.6111111111111,6.933333333333335,22.88888888888889,8.07648339933343,1.5003555555555559,143,5,28,3,4,48,32,36,0.14800000000000002,0.787,0.065,-0.4714,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,2,0,8,7,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,6,1,6,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,18,2,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33219316992019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311762407574481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613989643122173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107062373098769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3552175114251455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890115622391467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520670728674979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3252842454404953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33565755625064336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3440454407884254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474861322148102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DebrisBD317,2020/02/26,"I Thought I Saw My Ex-Abuser At Work Today And Had A Panic Attack At Work So a little over a year ago I was in a mentally abusive relationship and didn't even realize. It was really only two months ago when I realized it was abusive. For so many months after the relationship was over, I kept asking myself why I kept thinking about her as much as I did, and why it brought me so much pain to think about her. So often when I am in crowds and see someone who slightly resembles her, it really brings down my mood and spikes my anxiety. 

I work at a fast-food restaurant, that has a lot of customers 24/7, and has a lot of employees. I was a cashier, and there was one other cashier working. We probably had about ten customers in line. When I looked at one of the customers on the line, she looked exactly like my abusive ex, with her hair dyed a different color. It was so scary how much it looked like my abusive ex, that I was convinced that she had dyed her hair and just by coincidence walked into the restaurant while I was working there. I immediately started having a panic attack at the thought of having to ring up my ex abuser. My heart was pounding, and my whole body was shaking. One of the managers saw that I wasn't helping customers for like 2 seconds and told me to start serving the customers. So I pushed through a panic attack and kept serving customers, just praying that she would go to the other cashier. I kept thinking about what I would do if it was actually her. Would I take her order and just pretend not to recognize her? Would I be able to make eye contact with her without crying? Would I look at her and immediately run to the back? I have this crippling fear that she will one day learn about how much she hurt me and feel good about it. It's like it's a game and if she finds out that I am hurt she wins and I lose. 

So she thankfully goes to the other cashier. THANK GOD. And then she speaks to him, and I realize that it wasn't her. This girl was a complete stranger. I was in the middle of a panic attack for nothing. And now I am embarrassing myself in front of customers because I am mixing up their sodas and trembling all over. 

I don't know how to deal with this. I have been out of an abusive relationship for over a year and I still think about her almost every day. I know I am safe and will never see her again, but I never feel safe. I'm always a little afraid of seeing her in public one day and having a mental breakdown over it. I just want to get her out of my head and never think of her for the rest of my life. I am afraid people don't take this issue as seriously as it is because I am a guy. I'm afraid I'm weak because of how much this affects me to this day. 

​

Andy and all advice I would appreciate.",3.4012797090416984,4.623656669626996,4.518851814260341,86.5400014801658,72.88987566607459,7.067055738814176,26.54863401843864,7.447530270364453,1.2706101158758358,2167,74,452,24,42,710,216,563,0.111,0.8270000000000001,0.062,-0.9686,2,0,0,0,2,0,53.0,1,0,1,7,34,33,4,11,31,0,49,10,6,6,6,87,90,48,0,9,9,3,4,4,0,8,3,2,0,2,32,33,1,6,16,2,0,8,10,21,0,8,32,17,82,11,73,49,11,63,1,3,11,0,46,28,0,6,30,346,114,7,0.057114859239724425,0.4737023809572304,0.055735863700475965,0.0,0.0,0.055811979426518735,0.10125775320520973,0.0,0.0571922813042601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04752413826342933,0.061883926123905274,0.06940080550913796,0.0,0.0,0.04369271098814483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053394683449882095,0.25990559101592114,0.0,0.04391780126548615,0.0,0.10445006421473588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634417329919934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05988384325718048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273799096766086,0.14733743686082976,0.058882911971102576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059672871627392814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03772382586477152,0.0,0.048121732253147816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427009552074997,0.05775797788221894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05220194662219015,0.0,0.06906351450376147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029840156623874136,0.0,0.03245969071838308,0.047905234134138296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056552690232705184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058616323217246837,0.0,0.0,0.06768138319639888,0.03828288621882518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222852761874819,0.0,0.0,0.059613074139985275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277766591108601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04034191416807458,0.11161374096621507,0.11448818714020355,0.0,0.0,0.19184838806598006,0.0638969180740585,0.0,0.09711402175783826,0.0,0.0,0.03812461204666645,0.057905502737447836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511668911076565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117707147521276,0.0,0.2099299663056452,0.0,0.132151501395181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05480324783678758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19351253382506226,0.043438424145937335,0.06077423712805674,0.26804792493572405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039596251965379976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615794783465205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317848267704516,0.0,0.0,0.18395995255225767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365394443849198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048393234889094784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808523826768883,0.0,0.04561200036711529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588653223267692,0.0,0.0,0.1051673775291894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18298447801938936,0.0,0.09068563688931018,0.0,0.0,0.054138208294057744,0.05457569560707784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05579291836357461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033687823774566215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307455363156892,0.06376670065193997,0.0,0.05505668615858941,0.0,0.20790148880604933,0.0,0.0,0.24343654379119964,0.0,0.06940080550913796,0.07356019353233184
mentalhealth,IHoppedOnPop,2020/02/26,"Some Stranger Was Following Me Through 7-11 Last Night (and Even Followed Me Through the Parking Lot) Repeatedly Urging Me to Smile and Saying ""Your Life Can't Be THAT Bad!"" It was like 1am. I still have PTSD from a prior assault that also started with some stranger following me (out of a bar) and aggressively flirting with me in the middle of the night. So I was freaking the fuck out about it last night, and had even unfolded my knife inside my pocket. I was just worried that I needed to be ready to take it out, if necessary, because I hadn't been ready enough last time. 

And this is all after an especially bad week, during which my doctor refused to fill the meds that I need to treat my PTSD, anxiety, and traumatic brain injury. I've been having panic attacks almost every night, and haven't slept in 4 days. 

So his ridiculous proclamation that ""life can't be *that* bad"" sounded kinda like an ironic taunt.

I got to my car without further incident, *thankfully*, but idk why or how the hell he could possibly presume to know how bad my life is, or why he wouldn't realize that he'd actually just made things *much* worse. 

I guess this really just hasn't been my best week ever...though it's certainly not my worst. But I'm  *really* pissed that my doctor is refusing to fill my psych meds for no good reason, without even offering any alternative treatments. Not to mention that it just seems super fucking reckless to suddenly yank somebody off their psych meds when they're really, really not in a good place, even on a *good* day.

I mostly wish that I could sleep through the night without having a panic attack. I'm tired and anxious and paranoid and grumpy, and the people around me seem almost comically stupid right now.",4.780727272727276,6.439296830303032,5.219818181818184,81.1497272727273,70.0909090909091,8.31030303030303,28.35151515151515,8.841846274778883,2.2561006060606057,1374,50,253,25,25,438,184,330,0.223,0.6729999999999999,0.10400000000000001,-0.992,1,0,0,0,0,0,50.0,0,1,1,2,18,29,10,2,15,0,26,13,4,4,2,59,46,22,0,7,15,0,0,2,0,1,6,2,0,0,19,17,1,2,6,2,0,6,13,18,0,0,12,2,30,11,33,27,9,40,1,0,0,2,11,13,4,13,23,167,49,4,0.0,0.0,0.07791141767963204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598945964377033,0.0,0.0,0.06384727730559264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05429330698995171,0.0,0.0610766718112907,0.09019542645626928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107370124929009,0.0,0.1816569414599395,0.0,0.0,0.2666491620959728,0.04866915745925834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378618074197022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912680909846303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274900053988059,0.0,0.0,0.10297919347585613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634373472232226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249510405699026,0.0,0.21093181720256152,0.07221901180508745,0.06726786187778057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761987173814126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20089567782010756,0.0638545995887152,0.0,0.08795173931960673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043877466186186084,0.19523849980949975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16917809374780804,0.07801067583645231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678763242316024,0.0,0.07554566067653957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26604963281927296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05869090457163052,0.1183993210064574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746178047221174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873478982047919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05535036008415397,0.0,0.08341483771543605,0.0,0.0,0.0900065580227996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18665520618557374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045878165503084,0.08208786354469995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818213154546132,0.0,0.06349123483084285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536498582578228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989673116366157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05651050633201812,0.0,0.06375958630341459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060029046304867176,0.0,0.0,0.07350509109342332,0.0,0.0,0.0530415320518646,0.0,0.07844148320937727,0.0,0.04655480513052642,0.09176326885334384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808417602580235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14408468922788434,0.0,0.0918109930131454,0.23088605001674956,0.0,0.0,0.08108045344252,0.08136283555768709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iyuvm,2020/02/26,"Changing my mind to much? Hello, I am 15 (f) and I need some help. Ever Since I started going through puberty or at least that’s when I remember it starting my mind is always changing. I’m probably the most indecisive person ever. And it’s honestly not healthy because I’ve been wasting money on by impulse buying. One Example I can tell you is earlier in this year I really really wanted a pet bird, I did all my research and bought everything for her. I just came up with this fantasy in my head that have a pet bird would be so great and now I feel like the idea did not live up to the expectation. Another thing I have done this year was movies my whole bed room down stairs for around a 2 weeks before realizing it was a mistake. It’s also really hard for me to stick to a hobby I tried to get really in to make up and bought a whole bunch and don’t even wear it. I also tried to get into witch craft but it didn’t work out. If you have any questions please ask because I really want help thank you!",2.9362980769230766,4.2271092644230785,4.797307692307693,83.82269230769231,74.14423076923076,8.46923076923077,25.01923076923077,9.017664075816787,1.8292730769230767,789,25,166,17,16,270,129,208,0.05,0.8440000000000001,0.106,0.9205,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,0,1,10,7,0,1,9,0,17,2,2,1,3,37,33,13,0,7,6,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,12,11,0,0,5,1,4,2,4,3,0,1,10,2,23,4,25,21,8,25,0,0,0,0,11,14,0,6,10,115,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19441321505858636,0.10114257979886343,0.0,0.0,0.08266081823315859,0.12745985950317382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820873926896178,0.11363648514213068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481962547997044,0.0,0.1034334134949933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902527586124275,0.0,0.0,0.2571758111475174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439183926131835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802852025784582,0.2199049178899161,0.0,0.0,0.10924480479949096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146130261838623,0.0868381283174656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701378847991704,0.0,0.06908188088613608,0.0,0.0,0.13401360058559053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888841610978914,0.0,0.12474936664087873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629500298503226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721955414242468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05938509415862511,0.0,0.10733431803775677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113817014117114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24546956973502745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935610047907164,0.090130674435207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236806645915719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613617432397483,0.0,0.13342967697585484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105565992825427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616818357664662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3893526949766041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13769686980561516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055063971682154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17207294788800492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624346369884886,0.11191049709331097,0.0,0.0,0.08075500798945412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650542341360915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14339127562849754,0.0,0.09750320417001143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27142117016194706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849268472922331,0.0,0.0,0.08634840089009332,0.0,0.0,0.15655344875740698
mentalhealth,klingers,2020/02/26,"Okay brain, I know we're rationing our antidepressants, have had 4 hours sleep, are on a starvation diet, have spent all day suppressing Tourette's and fighting ADHD while spending all morning dealing with an IT issue that ended up being user error, but feel like helping me write up a business case? No? Okay then... Fine. I'll do it myself then.",5.208281249999999,7.1526745156250024,5.25825,80.16175000000003,69.46875,6.995000000000001,29.9875,7.554174236665415,2.0510975000000005,275,11,46,3,5,86,56,64,0.094,0.723,0.183,0.7193,0,0,0,0,2,0,12.0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,3,2,6,3,2,0,2,9,9,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,1,2,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,4,4,4,6,2,9,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,7,28,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3844824115466749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3571372125894666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063223315447566,0.3298241083832066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833547091262188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16176147645660602,0.2285513526548532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144360458880908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150573645709733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339140060846836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17582000441540882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629705361532725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201516597691381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadfatkid13,2020/02/26,"Trying to sleep off my anxiety and got an idea for a poem instead. I felt someone else might relate. I have these little monsters, 
They live inside my head,
They terroize my mind, 
And fill my heart with dread. 

One robs me of my passion, 
And makes me sad and meek,
One makes me worry, 
And panic makes me weak, 
The last creates nightmares, 
And robs me of my sleep. 

I have these little monsters, 
They live inside my head, 
I don't know how much to take, 
Of all the things they've said. 

The pills are meant to quiet them, 
Or keep them all at bay, 
But the monsters keep on nagging me, 
Wheverever I stand or lay. 

I have these little monsters, 
They live inside my head, 
I have these little monsters, 
And they want me dead. 

TL;DR: quick shitty poem about my mental illness triad.",4.8157999999999985,5.6285176466666655,4.892,86.70600000000002,69.2,6.533333333333332,25.0,5.6839178017228535,0.6374000000000004,597,15,117,2,10,186,83,150,0.21600000000000005,0.746,0.038,-0.9831,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,7,0,4,6,1,2,6,0,7,10,6,4,2,26,19,11,1,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,5,8,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,5,0,2,4,3,30,1,12,14,3,11,0,1,0,1,8,7,0,3,2,78,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745465732635386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064198070215606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12231645589445644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188715162569482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3922233409424434,0.0,0.0,0.1509603285675809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381024774608078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264640186466056,0.0,0.0,0.07001140213951483,0.1038416170559841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.510721664704731,0.3374688461524616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551057775093998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838133908511698,0.1351429551555582,0.12862977094750666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364789900265387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17264845550456084,0.0,0.0,0.14946725712864925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211791211649358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549683316441309,0.0,0.10793896776764708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578305372211196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846336936326597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649091760644427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513919937153211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12937292704029535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,u-not-nice,2020/02/26,"What happens after I get tested? Hi all,
I want to get tested for ADHD (or if there’s something related, I don’t want to be one of those self diagnosed people) but I wanna know what happens after. I’m in high school. But what about the future. Will colleges ignore me? Will jobs think I’m lesser than someone? Will people think less of me?

Please give me the harsh reality. Thanks in advance.",1.1988311688311697,3.7997344025974047,2.8909220779220814,88.05066883116888,88.0909090909091,4.638441558441558,19.388311688311685,6.2581,0.26166077922077946,307,9,57,3,10,101,53,77,0.08900000000000001,0.79,0.121,-0.3304,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,1,12,18,4,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,7,1,12,14,2,7,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,3,38,11,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628262567990419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219685967033303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285159319661161,0.2097900689672713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38677865579424414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23106095875237626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21701886711623453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120187847982438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819190653570205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30322811419142,0.0,0.0,0.24005903099958625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22132879717847956,0.0,0.0,0.22814429390481875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852977065591039,0.16836040798565186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20134295532892366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28025904191454104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579813686231191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kash246,2020/02/26,"Mental Health Hey, guys, I have been feeling kinda down recently thinking about my own mortality and along with my parents. I am in high school but I love my parents so much I don't want them to die and I don't want my family to die. This makes me so sad because I love my family so much and it makes me want to cry. Anybody have any coping strategies to make me feel better? Its like we spend so much of our time on this Earth on stupid shit like school and work that we don't get to bond more with the ones we truly love. Sometimes what makes me feel better is that thin reality I can cure aging in the future or cryo-genecially freeze me and my families bodies when we die so that we have some chance of living in the future again. I come from a background of Islam, so I really want to believe Heaven is real, bc I really want it to be. As I am typing, I am feeling a little better as Im throwing my emotions out here that have been pent up for a long time. I want to be on this planet with my parents and siblings for a long time. Sometimes these thoughts make me cry myself to sleep because I don't want to forget the memories they are giving me. It's like I'm looking for some sort of way to justify that I will be able to prolong my life with my family. Being a boy, and always having the need to repress my emotions about these topics around my famiily is tough bc I love them all so much. Also my mind goes to bad places, as I looked up sad statistics of life, like by the time you graduate from high school, 90 percent of your time with your parents is done. I know I'm going on a tangent but I really want some coping techniques guyss please. Thanks you",3.899739130434785,4.484929234782612,5.001449275362318,85.92130434782612,71.14492753623188,7.739130434782607,25.43478260869565,7.7425588080867325,1.2116956521739133,1306,36,276,15,23,431,164,345,0.165,0.654,0.18100000000000002,0.8175,4,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,6,4,3,4,14,20,2,1,12,0,26,10,3,5,1,55,60,22,4,9,3,4,6,4,0,1,3,0,0,2,15,21,0,1,7,0,1,3,4,7,0,1,4,8,53,13,49,51,11,34,2,2,2,4,25,17,1,6,17,187,68,6,0.07236550199479913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05787066580030512,0.0602138947391705,0.0,0.0,0.04921102287526435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442063915273821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060422171456619614,0.0882266766874476,0.0,0.0,0.08153113983145538,0.0,0.19200421738277154,0.0,0.0803817590815753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06233647228906743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158980211838192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22531189809382024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740550333063287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628028992277306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728790196637955,0.0,0.14636068859447465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037807988016333616,0.06941958352940134,0.04112698244729225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165322426286752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769211446570396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15291625199853018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07816716013687224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039770187374968034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222778832214464,0.14141651580785025,0.0725292440982939,0.06390006405886399,0.12808238411170395,0.1215375919164628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612507635525535,0.0,0.24152267254430304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292740546304093,0.0,0.07306852792902811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127878817902181,0.053658102789197255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490367369855878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214133043417829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07560654737259792,0.07943559023789039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236778409467628,0.13907758080734886,0.0,0.07145220298065408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197132542855072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428214787745463,0.0,0.0,0.07241776349489025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14314266370790216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662443162499397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046368891687365014,0.0,0.05745012527885793,0.21098453080559412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3414643840163057,0.057440367146612964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05268294732118284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CorgiRose2020,2020/02/26,"Hey. I'm freaking out. So, long story short, I love rap. It's my life, and Eminem is my idol. I don't really rap myself or anything but I've learned Em's fastest raps such as the newest one in Godzilla (the song). I wanted to show my mom, but she said she didn't want to hear it because she already heard me practicing (when I barely knew and sucked) and thought that she didn't need to hear the finished version. Then, I wanted to show my dad but realized he heard me from my room when I was practicing and sounding bad (it was the unpolished version). He said, ""It's great"", with a pretending-to-be-proud smile. I knew it was the bad version. But he thought he had to pretend it was good and take pity on me. Then he said, ""And your mom's been sick all week. Give her a break."" Yk, because she didn't want to listen. I tried to explain, but all that could get through the horrid thoughts swarming in my head was ""I-"". I just sat there and stared at the floor. I tried to cover up the tears welling up in my eyes. After a bit he said ""The world doesn't care about or want to hear what I do, either"". I feel so broken. I'm almost a year depression free. But my dad just keeps FUCKING BREAKING ME OVER AND OVER BECAUSE HE'S SO SHITTY AND I CANT TAKE IT I JUST NEED HELP PLEASE I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO",0.0669117647058819,2.248970397058823,1.5205882352941202,99.30014705882354,87.6764705882353,4.429411764705883,19.529411764705888,5.800992412223965,-0.3264470588235291,996,30,233,7,32,318,140,272,0.179,0.733,0.08800000000000001,-0.9790000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,1,0,0,12,13,2,0,13,0,18,6,2,0,2,45,55,25,0,8,12,4,1,0,0,0,2,12,1,0,11,11,0,1,10,7,1,0,7,7,1,1,22,15,36,7,26,32,7,27,0,2,2,2,33,14,2,3,11,138,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270368238343642,0.0,0.12420295271499768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261997658849384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879509573319615,0.20583034272686504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228766656639788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475336154301267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986290591206925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09694010929636143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190906700490398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05690922486302598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405169097969594,0.058803311525861435,0.10796928401774293,0.0,0.09440253420973288,0.0,0.12408800018090747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550991364055545,0.0,0.38055985527510205,0.0,0.07544063902913982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004060125682787,0.0,0.0,0.061855148616789875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949818012942005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960419383652176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158177439191672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26363700810730245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16691044933873414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626754748042992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354732436387172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210312546425009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42824753225038215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16924886066829053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680590365596543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528296362894757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319278147587268,0.0,0.09028171442166556,0.0,0.10119696805050793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247922708159663
mentalhealth,baerrit0o,2020/02/26,"NYC Psychiatrist Reco/Resource Hi All,

I’m 27F living in NYC and have been struggling with Bipolar ll and anxiety since I was 7. Recently, my depressive episodes have been very bad. They are also accompanied by *super fun* daily panic attacks. 

I really need help adjusting my meds. I currently have a psychiatrist in NYC but he is out of network and I’m paying a whopping $355/session. This seems to be the norm in NYC, as most psychiatrists are out-of-network. I’m needing more appointments than usual to get my mental health back on track, but I just can’t afford $355/session anymore.

Does anyone have any recommendations on affordable psychiatrists in NYC or resources I can refer to to find one? There’s just so many out there and it’s very overwhelming on how to find one. For reference, my insurance is United Healthcare. Choice Plus. The max I’m willing to pay right now is $200-$250.

Apologies for the lengthy post, but really appreciate any support or recommendations. Thanks all.",3.4143559718969563,6.379679693989072,4.702560499609682,76.86868852459018,79.92896174863387,7.857298985167838,28.932864949258388,8.704169506293173,2.9247061670569856,796,37,134,20,21,262,118,183,0.073,0.83,0.09699999999999999,0.8529,3,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,1,9,10,1,3,5,0,16,2,0,1,2,27,26,14,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,6,0,2,0,1,6,0,2,3,0,10,4,23,21,4,16,0,2,0,0,5,10,0,4,5,80,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328395404499729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22592343023600575,0.0,0.12707506659669238,0.0,0.164738262592647,0.11614922760952885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18897614464894527,0.0,0.12772971496564292,0.13869640824565216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307184347669075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536554902683954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30364633795745394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678655557132645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17656906769289588,0.0,0.0,0.11134123302833683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466797560891129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16841128532108438,0.0,0.0,0.18451275424760366,0.0,0.16740161693228908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463395786919317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22512329921379015,0.0,0.0,0.1948963977169696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15908917967716724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128309356257056,0.0,0.16401535522057578,0.0,0.0,0.14185856317799975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512219371719574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740939131023794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365611226083685,0.0,0.0,0.18850169361840716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15293342071343818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18294867134458653,0.27411925089815137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Trevor9250,2020/02/26,"So how am I bipoler? See I never feel depressed or manic,  or atleast I dont think so :/ like I never feel sad or want to cry or anything like that, maybe the only thing I do is lay in bed until the afternoon but that's mostly because i like dreaming and nothing really to do. also I haven't gone manic or felt manic since they said I was when I was hospitalized.  Like I'm pretty sure I just had psychosis from abusing my amphetamines and triazolam as well as smoking weed every day. As well as the fact I had a salvia trip that made me think gods showed me the answer to the universe and the meaning behind every thing and then that was taken way over the top when I tried to teach myself music theory and somehow figured that the arc of the covenant was a music box that had mind and matter controlling powers through waves and feqencys . Basically thought I was the second coming of jesus somehow all over the fact that everything seamed to be connected. And I'm an atheist.  Like gods and magic is the last thing i would think was real. Same as learning about nickola Tesla and thinking the pryamids were possibly power generators or entrance to hollow earth or possibly something else that could control the weather who knows but shit made me go insane pretty well because everything seamed to actully fit and everything I was learning was basically what I was shown In my salvia trip. And the salvia trip was basically me creating the universe with sacred geometry and music . Then i was a 5 dimensional book that could turn the pages of time forward or back but doing so felt like I was  being ripped and flipped very hard to describe.  

But ya I dont see how I'm bipoler if I never get depressed.  I just have existential depression that I might never know or there might not be an after life and when I die nothing happens or I won't get any  answers to anything.  That's the only thing I'm scared of . Just not knowing . 

I wish there was an actual test to see if I am bipoler not just them thinking I am because I acted out in the hospital. Like they said because I ran around and had a lot of confidence that I was in a manic episode basically.  And now psychedelics wont work because of the antipsychotic and antidepressant I'm on who knows if lithium interferes too. So now I cant even trip which is probably the worst thing about it .

So ya I just dont see how I'm bipoler. Crazy sure bipoler idk .",6.516976229961307,6.541834929637528,7.010030798389008,75.74266682460713,65.37526652452026,9.762647082050073,34.21472005054095,9.444778638647367,3.1003920240069496,1918,79,355,33,27,629,213,469,0.094,0.773,0.133,0.9247,3,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,3,6,32,19,1,1,29,0,44,2,1,7,9,99,84,55,1,8,25,0,5,7,0,5,1,2,1,0,22,22,0,3,20,3,0,10,14,7,3,1,29,11,44,12,38,45,6,40,1,4,4,0,9,12,1,19,26,256,66,6,0.0,0.08854806777217111,0.072930013955642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059765089169259315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05082196877429267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300012077038698,0.06652947896935682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746615637653904,0.0,0.2277870457516369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437708592655475,0.0,0.0,0.1676420150448966,0.11933870734032954,0.0,0.08209225179337044,0.04819751867574035,0.0,0.1931059409125608,0.0,0.0775625295605362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627645531222451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624310187168701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04936137998260716,0.0,0.12593394528348426,0.0,0.20149943505082368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557593716743494,0.0,0.14351352743537504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809130044930476,0.0,0.042473293493921135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608740134032567,0.0,0.06694736153959349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16428833239589813,0.060918527475799324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052787131443517335,0.2555802405357977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353653188321529,0.0,0.14143103158726264,0.0,0.0,0.075080770501967,0.08140769320166795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15856282019117807,0.07546046043800407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305591696530886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14341938436731516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367778908743288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16850366039272094,0.0,0.15206354656010804,0.08057634558831718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506413211279609,0.04787678353357997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217909604006784,0.0,0.0748221925660189,0.0,0.2382146293453245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671380880426598,0.061821085021313726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05753420818695716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087261397820702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482511413588609,0.2394339954492528,0.0,0.059330782056735185,0.04357824166199308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05073976590498057,0.08128958910578102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06166372383344813,0.04408029758392964,0.05932070448745756,0.0,0.0,0.20158565814228116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08594089545723263,0.0,0.0,0.0544075482942393,0.0,0.0,0.0530891881733886,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Crystacry,2020/02/26,"I wrote a poem to acknowledge the steps I’ve taken (long read) So a little bit of back story: I’ve been dealing with recurrent depression, anxiety, obsessive thoughts and ""drug abuse"". I started to smoke weed to stop my thoughts about over 1,5years ago, it got to the point where I felt it was an essential part of living and thought that without it I’d commit suicide and I grew more resistant to the high and it got too expensive. I had a fear of leaving my house, because of not knowing what could be out there, thinking if I took the bus without bringing my headphones I’d get an anxiety attack that I could break the windows just to get off. The fear of leaving my house was strengthened from the smoking, something I haven’t realized till recently. I realized I had to change a few things and start focusing on working on my problems instead of avoiding them. And during the past 6 months I’ve been without weed, started eating healthier, exercizing and writing down a positive perspective on things that I used to think negatively about (like instead of ""I couldn’t go to the grocery store until 21.00 in the evning"", I’d write ""you did good, you went to the grocery store today""), I went from having nothing except therapy once a week to now having a full week of meaningful things, like a practice jobb on tuesdays and thursdays, therapy on Fridays, reflection group on wednesdays and an being an assistant on a self mastery course that I was previously a part of in the pilot group of the course. I still have though times, I still overthink, but I’m still here and I’ve never felt more complete before. And now in the process I’m in I’ve made a poem to make me think back on the road I’ve taken and I wanted to share it.

(Sorry for the long read)

Poem (chains):

I used to think life was a bad thing,
Wanting to explore space,
yet I was to scared to leave my room.
Bound by chains forged by my own mind.

But I broke those chains, took control.
No more ""what if""s, more trying.
I were met with new beatiful faces and smiles, friends in places I never dared to look, a hand to hold me through hard times.

Now even if I’m still scarred by my chains, I think life is a beatiful thing, for now my troubles had become my servant and not my master, something that gives me wisdom, not doubt.

Now I can do what I want, now I can be free, my chains are no more.


P.S. Hope you like it and thank you if you took the time to read this post❤️",6.601519230769231,6.066956908333332,6.532083333333336,81.11278846153847,65.33333333333334,9.551282051282053,34.08653846153846,8.841846274778883,2.670456730769231,1916,75,384,26,26,607,234,480,0.09699999999999999,0.802,0.10099999999999999,0.8397,2,1,4,0,1,2,65.0,0,5,1,3,25,22,1,6,35,0,27,6,2,5,3,73,70,24,1,11,13,0,4,3,1,0,3,0,2,1,21,18,1,5,17,3,4,10,13,12,0,0,29,5,47,11,65,35,11,74,0,2,1,0,17,26,0,5,40,256,68,4,0.0,0.08663457223053309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481596610684118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187233312531754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318391157725068,0.0,0.11244866208089163,0.06105167285014236,0.04457292804880834,0.08075466970234553,0.062219252487670476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07982748371729474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735066545146646,0.0,0.07666433496778596,0.0,0.08200966224721894,0.11675983588456718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538292537177757,0.0629776610114885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479532908516954,0.07481943485318948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04829469628298267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16455938241150106,0.0,0.0,0.14041224581713693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056491893014065965,0.0,0.07640377231899109,0.07014282341827065,0.041555459149433684,0.061329111770551226,0.11696058126487413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550065037972896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772546961274544,0.0,0.07262409596387201,0.0,0.16874001832861893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040184528464830685,0.0,0.0,0.2322687676896272,0.0,0.0,0.10329283669187662,0.10716738554621226,0.07328488162555173,0.06456579947355574,0.12941679559246186,0.0614019086189684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918737602050944,0.04880778970564921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738297839224014,0.0,0.058363234294580124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278842971545786,0.0706192046010391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016006857539643,0.0,0.0,0.07786981041736868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583624422908583,0.06980077300176453,0.0,0.0,0.07639424542751913,0.0,0.06912149903583513,0.0,0.07002820530467778,0.0,0.0,0.06996542295417676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194176622532641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219661947980102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320530881583892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627951599438329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258182454583117,0.0,0.08185121953219489,0.1552629343243097,0.0,0.2335730964813125,0.06113112055602168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998079258744842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731855054756045,0.1672368894729477,0.0,0.2428865132630909,0.2342599030682927,0.07183947225838541,0.17414598826075134,0.1279095892185722,0.0,0.06930867341607606,0.0,0.2437151434071566,0.049643295724595096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630342790143964,0.0,0.0,0.12938320917868326,0.0,0.11730399826559873,0.0,0.0,0.13556489498764548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21145357413440147,0.0,0.05323181850462552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frankyu7,2020/02/27,"Struggling to stay happy Struggling to stay happy

I was born into an immigrant family who struggled to make ends meet. And honestly, I don’t remember much of my childhood at all but I remember my parents used to work all the time and I’d see them quite late only at night. My primary caretakers were my grandparents when I was little. My grandfather passed away after being struck by a car crossing the road. My grandma was kind of shipped off to the states to live with relatives because they needed help with having their kids taken care of too. My parents eventually bought a restaurant four hours away from home and right now I can’t help but remember this moment we had when I was maybe 6 years old, when they left to go back to the restaurant. They would come home and visit for a weekend once a month or two. This time it was summer break so they asked me if I wanted to come with them. I’ve been before.. never really cared for it. But I remember I told them no, I didn’t want to come with them. They left soon after.. and I was so so terribly sad I cried I eyes out. They turned around and came home because they forgot something, saw me crying and took me with them. And I remember this making me absolutely furious. I was throwing a tantrum in the car and crying harder than before. I cried so much until I just tired out and fell asleep on that four hour drive. I don’t understand what happened in my mind at that time, and I still don’t understand. But I remember this moment often when I feel terrible. I’m 25 years old now. I’ve got mental illness, bipolar disorder but honestly sometimes I don’t even know if that’s true. I mean the doctor told me I had depression when I went to them at 16 years old. At 21 I tried to kill myself, but ended up at the inpatient mental health ward for a month. That’s where they told me I had bipolar disorder.

Today, I have a good job at a good company. I have a loving girlfriend. I still live at home with my parents. The restaurant failed in 2010 and my parents and brothers all came to live together again. I’ve just never come to understand why i keep getting up every morning. And I’ve never come to understand why I’m like this. I get so angry when I feel terrible. But I’ve never been abused.. I had pretty typical childhood issues. I mean yeah I’ve been bullied who hasn’t? I had trouble making friends too. But why do I feel so terrible so often. I’ve been incredibly privileged all my life. But I just wake up so often and dread having to face the day. I can’t take it sometimes it’s so hard. And for me the worst part is that the safest I feel is when I’m alone. I live downstairs in the basement. The rest of my family is upstairs and I could spend weeks without seeing them. My grandmother lives with us again. I think I love her dearly.. I’m really not sure sometimes, and the same goes for the rest of my family. But if I love them then why don’t I just walk up the stairs to see them? 

Sometimes I just want to be in the hospital again because that’s where I felt safest. I hope I can at least understand why I’m like this one day. 

Thank you for reading, I hope this resonates with someone out there.",2.168596936812129,4.296042261345853,3.5085553759716785,88.56583929808359,78.65571205007825,6.819271915646888,23.151466174093734,7.869387291563388,1.1825448626183337,2491,81,510,42,61,813,268,639,0.17800000000000002,0.691,0.131,-0.9904,7,1,1,0,1,1,63.0,2,1,18,3,40,38,3,4,27,1,39,14,4,4,10,109,102,50,1,11,21,5,6,2,2,1,7,0,4,1,20,39,0,2,20,2,2,19,16,16,0,4,31,11,95,22,71,67,12,110,0,3,5,3,43,35,0,9,54,346,115,5,0.0,0.059063368916127026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051628928305371184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04437652067434255,0.04660244511060336,0.0,0.09367027490677733,0.03833109947686608,0.0,0.09116316587839934,0.0,0.08483630884876182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11402883113124378,0.1016495390801697,0.0,0.0,0.21470415286804867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039800677050068935,0.0,0.219028831450177,0.06429745782170161,0.0,0.042935201617875465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426342621950165,0.051022957089092665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830351674593896,0.0,0.0,0.03292504816280273,0.0,0.04200025622512469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098068899542307,0.0,0.1008213859524808,0.0,0.0478632263166912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03851351062231274,0.0,0.0520884916364823,0.0,0.028330553854307924,0.08362259685806647,0.039869106420411575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04408164587074757,0.10613119298000387,0.044655256879778574,0.0,0.0,0.05298756440577973,0.0,0.0,0.06682598297873096,0.0,0.2000119875314013,0.09902337281011328,0.09818320420406977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520298058905175,0.049467821991593164,0.044308423170888775,0.05515095788264164,0.05191046267657005,0.02739591791511634,0.0,0.056232276731305764,0.0,0.10832300371102348,0.0,0.035210094324072995,0.04870778231927719,0.049962178931370775,0.22008959792193086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349730466328921,0.0,0.0998245532405199,0.0,0.050080406701527434,0.10860118661317926,0.0,0.0,0.10047290926697487,0.0,0.0503336676402483,0.0,0.07957860585047714,0.0,0.0732900663491151,0.036962686789325315,0.1537876730326128,0.0,0.0,0.04678027023784388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15692562963466752,0.05308796732869395,0.033779232886588635,0.037912703028799816,0.0,0.0,0.22140736777408432,0.0539820253662392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05071474496926849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05302095624220343,0.04986287421105425,0.0,0.06386958404642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388178088573583,0.042571101785389705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917051570037085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04223722151589149,0.0383764914236952,0.1972092627132583,0.0,0.0,0.1062656218984635,0.07961956532576857,0.0,0.0,0.15634019966989882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04698245472155256,0.0,0.03748053313089013,0.0,0.0,0.04589461555035188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031941472603710434,0.0,0.0,0.08720273051990927,0.057294534065880524,0.047251387542701286,0.1428996687257704,0.05538450010926282,0.033844459712825535,0.05422181546353355,0.048695605022911724,0.2594748352366161,0.05996267147164268,0.04305386271004778,0.0,0.0,0.08820737516817515,0.0,0.03998616918463861,0.0,0.0,0.046210878628367036,0.22490657859334773,0.0,0.0,0.048053027546941,0.0,0.036290945444374674,0.0,0.0,0.035411572329396485,0.0,0.0,0.09630410726098494
mentalhealth,Infamous-Tadpole,2020/02/27,"My uncle Bascially When i was younger i was made to sit on my uncles lap because the car was too crowded in the backseat . I remember him holding my waist and his penis ( possibly a boner ) up against mine , this was made worse by the fact the roads were really bumpy ) . I remember thinking this was uncomfortable at the time but i would always be made to sit on my aunties laps in the car but never a males . I am currently feeling depressed and running through things in my life which may have traumatised me . Am i beinbg dramatic or am i entitled to feel uneasy ?",3.8897222222222254,5.851867046296299,5.041851851851857,80.28833333333334,72.98148148148148,8.503703703703705,31.44444444444445,9.150863307647796,2.9925111111111105,443,21,81,10,9,146,72,108,0.146,0.815,0.039,-0.9169,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,8,0,13,3,1,3,2,18,19,6,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,4,2,1,1,5,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,9,2,17,0,13,7,0,17,0,1,0,1,4,8,0,2,4,63,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17932729876460193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137708229862805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856243624969265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21794360790533868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15222593736794265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6117818140768704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16621989469521606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24296288651958475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13806562418265905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4882771975895266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14317983062387135,0.13809450674171955,0.0,0.0,0.12566961879604654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21963010048119475,0.15309699945420407,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Boliver02,2020/02/27,"How do you know if you have a mental illness? I'm 17 and idk if I'm suffering from a mental illness. I might be bipolar, i might be depressed or I might just have really bad anxiety. Or maybe it's just stress. All I know is I want to find out if I have a mental illness ir not. When I search online some random tests come up that I'm guessing aren't reliable. Just wondering how anyone here was diagnosed so I can find help. If it helps I'm from Dublin (Ireland). Thanks",1.5303030303030312,3.3064666767676805,3.4797979797979792,89.70636363636366,79.20202020202021,6.824242424242425,23.12121212121212,7.793537801064563,1.066624242424243,367,12,80,6,9,124,62,99,0.237,0.6679999999999999,0.095,-0.9288,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,0,8,5,0,1,3,0,13,5,0,2,1,28,24,11,0,5,10,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,0,10,1,5,18,2,4,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,13,1,52,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711566705376606,0.0,0.0,0.11618633726334213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13874072171894053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313631811473804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14311755490061595,0.16865384042047465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037433528986221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18304933259451114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227536130577836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263972863875155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16693494115483526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5023653051411621,0.5288239894381258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644946753245653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19034129165765584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529822829092182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800834266968714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18019870817521916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bigguybroadway2020,2020/02/27,"Can you get fired (in California) for a three day hold in a psych ward? Long story short, I’ve been dealing with a lot of mental health issues again that have been getting significantly worse and I know where this ends for me. Its going to end in using drugs/alcohol again, losing so much weight that hospital intervention will be needed or suicide. Ultimately dont want any of those things to come to pass this time around and want to deal with this shit before I get significantly worse. I don’t have anyone to lean on really about my mental health and have increasingly been thinking about suicide as well as restricting my eating and cutting myself in lue of drugs or alcohol and feel like I need some kind of health asap. My concern though is that if I check myself in to a psychiatric ward that I won’t have a job when I get back, which would make life soooooo much harder.",10.261783601014374,7.467267857988169,9.396128486897721,70.69804733727813,59.769230769230774,12.497379543533391,35.385460693153,10.608840637214634,3.381685714285714,704,19,135,12,7,223,108,169,0.183,0.7909999999999999,0.026000000000000002,-0.9790000000000001,1,0,4,0,0,3,12.0,0,1,0,1,11,6,2,0,5,0,15,9,1,2,0,26,30,13,2,6,3,0,3,1,0,3,6,0,0,0,11,9,3,2,3,0,1,4,3,3,1,1,3,3,14,3,25,23,5,22,0,1,0,0,3,9,1,5,10,91,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25752662297617696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193487865457694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424688718711652,0.0,0.0,0.10725843405468008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264659876455564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252504590066312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378835867129292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770375566690065,0.24843236055911425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120915484673646,0.0,0.13972596357279599,0.1232876591390262,0.0,0.0,0.21343036325889134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060921540333478526,0.0860755029815079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25179666906286424,0.0,0.0684751935514347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842142035588715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12575649057616334,0.11956415334701215,0.0,0.0,0.12546803699646533,0.0662161704075388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510310233269769,0.058863565444670876,0.0,0.0,0.10662666600714307,0.0,0.13479345414660415,0.0,0.1024332223945088,0.0,0.0,0.08042560268420468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428438901728597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17714272387548222,0.17867826694078148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718666836023058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236775506164053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26358511564646353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004580551939308,0.07720281538104617,0.1183772690330845,0.0,0.07025658447850885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406155832209857,0.0,0.0,0.1421319921562674,0.0,0.0,0.14671996702117446,0.10833173682392246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455718550960684,0.08559007641311386,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ediddy_420,2020/02/27,"I have ptsd, Anxiety, and depression. I'm told by my doctor I'm manic depressive. I really need some guidance, I know this all won't go away, I've already seen counselor, I'm way better than what I was 2 years ago (I'm 23). To give you a quick look at what I'm dealing with. I was sexually assaulted at 12 I'm a male, I lost my father to suicide at 14, my fathers was the highest level of bipolar, he was HEAVILY abused as a child and teen, he was a really great man when on his meds, but off of them he had what I called ""Caveman Rage"". He would yell degrading things at me smack me upside the head and then moments later he would cry and hold me and tell me he was so sorry and that's when I was YOUNG like 5 is when I remember it most from then on. I have done drugs of course I did speed, psychedelics, I still smoke weed occasionally and I fell into alcohol and moved from hometown to south MO 3 hours away in the country side. I broke that and of course I still have cravings but those go away. I get really cold, and then I start sweating, and I start shaking, I'm on trazodone btw for sleep. Then my brain starts making things up, and will create thoughts that could happen but aren't, like for instance. I'm in a relationship with this woman back home, it will start going to thoughts of her cheating on me, (abandonment issues is what my therapist says). I obviously don't want to lose her, I have no idea, what to do. I do at home work outs of push ups, sit ups, I even lift boxes with heavy books in it. I'm skinny, yadda yadda. Help, tips guidance or anything would much appreciated. Thank you.",2.7347954173486078,4.129363373860187,4.0860334346504565,88.30563186813187,74.83586626139817,7.249988309562777,24.20399812953004,7.882392219407189,1.0939753565583359,1246,38,272,18,26,411,186,329,0.12300000000000001,0.792,0.085,-0.8612,0,0,3,0,1,1,47.0,0,2,1,4,10,16,3,1,8,0,27,9,5,1,2,39,57,25,1,6,4,2,0,2,0,6,4,2,2,4,16,17,2,2,5,1,0,7,4,11,0,0,15,5,38,5,43,35,4,55,0,6,2,0,26,24,0,3,24,166,54,3,0.0,0.12688088804726147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492639171107736,0.11444371000373794,0.0,0.0,0.11817345056450845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819214581973588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812368776595643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018360080512917,0.08234349023265301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470997611958397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195447942609403,0.10934806207376624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550046063518972,0.0,0.11763032295794212,0.0,0.11040225938116484,0.18446819440659426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960834481782727,0.0,0.10958744341529332,0.0,0.0,0.12418721971589848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073012302816001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0559486717161731,0.1027278544386444,0.18258046727794408,0.0,0.0,0.1180640784657972,0.0,0.0,0.09469690736076804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099024199580445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177833080443725,0.0,0.21483449948579467,0.0,0.1054593766775171,0.0,0.0,0.12088847800911093,0.0,0.11177127376005397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05885235566017176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463484878857192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992632493919996,0.1198032482892703,0.11689839064868562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07148157533458918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894980100185948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381680642823724,0.07872145522738166,0.0794038438799895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517927235864992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20580851613442896,0.0,0.0,0.1149716373141118,0.12130898632815935,0.0,0.0,0.0851600846255029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10716459374787922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987541641414225,0.3031876456198257,0.0,0.17104004292095326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171360777683018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359898234066014,0.09859155826152537,0.0,0.12433655867594685,0.14228802984341485,0.0,0.0,0.17003063997434778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232646281619154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316283848482009,0.0850008797969871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796079821650169,0.0,0.0,0.22821514384071204,0.0,0.0,0.06896068226441279
mentalhealth,Youyouryan,2020/02/27,"I am not feeling good Feeling upset, dont know how to snap out of it, thinking of suicide, what should I do to feel better ? At least temporary",3.8479310344827553,4.664330517241385,5.120172413793104,84.17956896551725,71.41379310344827,7.179310344827586,31.74137931034483,7.1686216300943375,1.9721586206896549,111,5,22,1,2,37,24,29,0.348,0.569,0.083,-0.8098,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,9,9,1,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,2,2,6,8,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33263613611334825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4407946805878321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5705131004011889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154607629217336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20669860758121444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4114000858697687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409942215382937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Simeszn420,2020/02/27,I just want to happy again For a long time now I haven’t been happy and it’s getting to the point to where all I want to fall asleep and not wake up. I don’t have a lot of friends and my family is shit show. I don’t have anybody by my side I have to deal with things on my own. I keep on my problems to myself because I feel like no one will listen or they just won’t even care. I have done a lot of things to try and make myself happy from drugs to even trying to do music. Sometimes I just think I’m wasting my time to trying to be happy again and I should just give up. Does anybody have any advice it would be greatly appreciated.,2.9673492063492053,3.0446308142857177,4.383809523809525,91.33896825396828,73.0,6.793650793650794,22.6984126984127,5.82211442006289,0.1492460317460318,494,10,119,2,9,165,79,140,0.076,0.721,0.203,0.9558,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,10,10,1,0,4,0,18,4,3,1,1,24,29,6,0,5,6,0,1,1,1,4,1,1,0,0,4,6,0,1,2,1,0,1,6,2,0,1,2,2,19,8,21,21,4,14,0,0,0,0,5,7,1,3,7,89,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13735249564250168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558484784294614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08568337919162977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330913013614882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14491001740185272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300400955157202,0.14384051940013073,0.0,0.0,0.16300365835799874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856756087474504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250638805156156,0.0,0.07107078522301764,0.10041528089860538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859543005738442,0.0,0.07343620535889478,0.13483687071080566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15496664435049776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5985100998551703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249351770757454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866996130234543,0.0,0.0,0.12439017197133645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389962403659422,0.0,0.0,0.09382413352506402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524632429125872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328735596121483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13449585045705242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14428165454538086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390163110918708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867621278428499,0.09006444486669342,0.0,0.0,0.16392200849297847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28629072745018475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16581052009787445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984898452469508,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway156730,2020/02/27,"My mom is forcing me to go to a therapist that I don’t want to go to. What should I do? I’m 17 years old and I’ve been diagnosed with depression, but every time I go to see the therapist, we just talk about the same exact things as the last time and nothing is actually getting done. I tried telling her this and that I don’t want to go anymore but she got really upset and we had an argument. I feel stuck and like I don’t even have the support of my mother. Can y’all give me some advice?",1.3295846313603334,2.7021638691588805,3.6036760124610616,90.40142263759087,78.53271028037383,7.372377985462098,23.10384215991693,8.167268648758528,1.0828222222222226,382,12,90,7,9,132,70,107,0.115,0.797,0.08800000000000001,-0.5993,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,2,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,6,0,12,1,0,0,1,18,26,8,0,3,3,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,1,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,5,2,16,2,10,20,2,9,0,1,1,0,10,0,0,1,6,60,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.17356049672705035,0.0,0.0,0.1737975197557365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638403622915946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15318596193748873,0.1805187406758228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182007071623852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747132852771387,0.0,0.14985022566629996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992866231569946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292172153076997,0.17061440049955331,0.4043156180347042,0.0,0.14224662254890005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449752895290958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868908052980221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20830123352643296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17065634737310578,0.0,0.1866285520381673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393825232003488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14172714070084932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20182736562338294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14295284232566807,0.1554528160515404,0.0,0.0,0.41300594730797796,0.11815873621937745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20741697030106868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075164252181528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20980657837790426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453257275620587
mentalhealth,wafflesbestfriend,2020/02/27,"Advice for supporting a loved one Hi all,

What advice do you have for supporting a parent in a psych clinic? What things or activities would you recommend bringing to them? 

Bit of background: my mom recently experienced a few physical health issues in succession for a couple months and today she decided to admit herself into an in-patient psych clinic because she was afraid of self harm. She's a very tender, kind person so I want to spend time with her but also leave her with things to occupy her while I'm away to keep her spirits up. What do you suggest? 

Thanks for your help in advance!",5.587500000000002,7.075185607142856,6.2003571428571425,75.54464285714286,67.92857142857143,9.171428571428573,29.17857142857143,9.516144504307137,2.797228571428572,476,17,81,10,8,155,79,112,0.031,0.774,0.196,0.9452,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,4,1,2,2,9,0,1,7,0,5,5,0,0,1,12,14,6,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,5,4,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,2,0,1,1,1,15,7,19,12,3,13,1,0,0,1,22,6,0,1,5,60,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472791830466739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14210106756335267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16694846939313626,0.0,0.0,0.1083200337465874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19399478806269935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19661397960237909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18887940241915752,0.0,0.0,0.11910390553560453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854653776747996,0.0,0.15794174698355762,0.0,0.18503996701126066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18815128267146547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16037491486041944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20811195208177424,0.14183289689710935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040940913865597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19730710302192225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515471696697114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17545044942701835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18537260414297266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4032879338477287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16359588625405658,0.0,0.0,0.2361027328914941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361424618919772,0.0,0.16843223391426446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661537543847236,0.1048079645200052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622804417048494,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frickaduck,2020/02/27,"I did a thing today This morning I woke up at 5am for my 7am-3pm shift at a fast food place. I have a problem where I REALLY don’t wanna go to work in the mornings, and usually once I make up my mind, it’s over. 

Well today, I decided to not go to work. I fucked around until like 6:20 and I was like “shit. There’s not point in not going to work. I’ll still feel like this if not worse tomorrow, so let’s go and get it over with” Something made me stand up, put on my uniform, throw my hair in a bun, and drive my car to work. 

I’m now off work, and I feel so much better now that I know I don’t have to worry about the repercussions from calling in too late. I’m sorry if this is rambly or all over the place and whatnot, I’m just super proud of myself for not succumbing to my mind.",1.052733990147786,2.1277507758620717,3.0916256157635487,95.03379310344828,78.59770114942529,6.3507389162561605,19.89983579638752,6.868970318607317,0.020355993431855342,601,13,150,6,14,204,101,174,0.086,0.785,0.129,0.753,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,8,12,10,2,0,7,0,8,4,2,2,1,28,23,12,0,4,9,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,8,1,0,4,0,0,8,7,3,1,0,4,3,19,7,30,18,2,38,0,0,0,1,1,19,2,3,13,97,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866308144380246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789085187862468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611170351132024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479849423473889,0.09522779733483587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611839282298025,0.0,0.0,0.12323143831602335,0.0696424689387424,0.0,0.3030242811537481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325684820235942,0.0,0.15036544398117646,0.0,0.0,0.13630577746409805,0.0,0.19536735144406472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612936610889702,0.08897715061379134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691850560521014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979890376718406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419575418505715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785351404939593,0.0,0.12600927162351466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754775443623206,0.0,0.13400085616039364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539382468828947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368280209468911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102618967375923,0.0,0.14921569553057742,0.0,0.0,0.10645159671378178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855697011892052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527009852556587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468084207009257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11985050707650875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4852110248278522,0.13537013383619562,0.13584159277728575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SSJLowden,2020/02/27,"I Don't Know I don't know how to feel
I don't know how to act properly
And I don't how to be a person

I have depression and anxiety, I'm a 16 ,going on 17, teenage boy and for the past year I have been having outburst of anger at home. I mostly yell and I hate it every time, I hate myself every time, I hate myself all the time. I've already figured out that I have a problem with expressing myself and sharing how I feel. Whenever I want to react I search within to look how to say it in the best way, but I only seem to grasp at anger and before I know it I'm being an ass to my family and by the time I realize, its too late.I get punished for actting out, but to me it seems I get trouble for not knowing how to express which leads me to further isolate myself in my head, never letting my feelings come to light, because it only seems to make things worse for myself and others. I'm wanting to see a therapist and so are my family, meaning they want me to see one. So until then I guess I'll post here updates on my condition and vent. Thank you for reading.",3.758047411104181,3.6245883886462913,5.629460386774799,83.83599344978168,71.22707423580786,8.28958203368684,28.58421709295072,7.957251820313856,1.720438303181535,827,28,180,10,14,288,120,229,0.17,0.784,0.046,-0.9823,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,2,10,12,6,0,9,0,13,2,2,9,2,49,44,22,0,4,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,10,14,0,0,15,1,0,5,6,9,0,1,1,9,34,3,33,40,3,27,0,1,3,1,8,10,1,5,10,128,44,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037470477862484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903797416128156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201941011573022,0.0,0.10053173659798434,0.0,0.12398470875395767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177048782781437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017571471084248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19908262172977426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227510631366824,0.0,0.17921128029192507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345059779346057,0.0,0.06714388724369548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301487988517786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34992785385035363,0.12124970107955738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850794029000017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32464392205138626,0.0,0.13327143788715418,0.0,0.0,0.12081011749774685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921110037634832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07886195449857693,0.0,0.0,0.1286933158099561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111984035569702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005734782946211,0.17970748262532565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127816977090754,0.0,0.10315867532663486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314917503251125,0.0,0.0,0.11304773346143447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181758472104316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395275198393148,0.0,0.0,0.18829074574650495,0.3226612420633589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877100770612018,0.0,0.13717414574196465,0.07848954141455358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27556257626691016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20905295684693126,0.0937771094650922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12039870275364906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608078251592996
mentalhealth,cringehead,2020/02/27,"can't cope with the things that i've done i was genuinely a really awful person when i was 14. now i'm 18 and i spend nearly every day crying and ruminating on the horrible things that i did years ago. i deeply resent myself and i have constant anxiety that the things that i have done will come back and ruin my life later, which makes me want to give up and isolate myself. has anyone else had success overcoming anything like this? i just want to move on with my life and try to be a better person but i feel like i will never be able to. i recently started seeing a therapist and am considering trying medication.",4.205040650406506,5.505873406504066,5.7611382113821135,78.099918699187,71.03252032520325,8.71869918699187,25.04878048780488,9.150863307647796,2.0136439024390245,491,14,92,10,9,167,80,123,0.111,0.79,0.099,-0.1263,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,4,6,1,0,6,1,15,3,0,1,1,17,24,9,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,2,3,0,0,2,9,10,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,2,0,0,6,2,16,4,10,14,0,17,0,1,1,0,3,4,0,0,13,69,25,1,0.16340314543627046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484702924762646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500295900466987,0.0,0.0,0.11425527860141148,0.1674258325898066,0.13446686584374462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564693256626647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14451680332261607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075734109004848,0.0,0.1765807501856932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17949068244114566,0.10538151080145096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3344363002832913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365023605783451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137674197549932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262154004775107,0.11673523974916387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675118655841472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308329480535103,0.15966104609694784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090728684249294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16461147814426086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17367168384278212,0.0,0.0,0.12602657924483548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285354647683633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468023914314477,0.0,0.16134089301596838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021115103615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156575873711662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18972364614784426,0.3256733672609067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218800193741164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927588176156539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522626827839328
mentalhealth,avion44,2020/02/27,"A poem I wrote before leaving my Silicon Valley job #quarterlifecrisis     Living in this city, searching for validity
    These wants in me, conflicting with these ideas of succeeding,
    Is this me or someone else’s reality?
    People going ‘Oh, whoa. he’s in control. look at that success’
    But it’s all a facade, my cerebral’s a mess
    Don’t meant to startup just to trouble you over this www
    When I hunger with a world-wide wonder

    Don’t chase the money, they say
    And I swear, that’s not me
    I’m just trying to find my way

    Am I
    Living a life or living a lie
    I won’t deny about this nine to five
    401-k’s and pay-days be looking super fine
    But I ask myself, are they worth all my time?
    Am I thriving or simply surviving?
    Living or only existing?

    Why does stability have to compromise the best of my ability?
    Feed my stomach, or feed my soul
    My sole question is can I stomach these decisions I so chose

    Steve Jobs said
    Connect the dots
    But life got me playing tic tac toe
    Which x do I cross?

    Lying on my bed, these “What if’s” floating in my head
    My confession is that these professions puts me on different directions
    There is no right road, only what’s left to learn for these life lessons

    Call me young, call me naïve
    but can’t a dude believe
    and take in all his possibilities?
    To dream the dream to mean something
    Than just a lean mean money making machine

    And don’t get me twisted
    So hear me out straight
    I’m not asking to live life though serendipity
    But it’d be nice to have some clarity

    You see, it was never my intent to be mired by content
    But to be admired for staying true to this desire
    To take things higher and feed this fire
    What happens to a dream
    Left out to dry, with the dismissal of “too old to try” or “that idea will never fly”
    What will I say, years from today
    To the wide-eyed kid who asks “Hey mister, is there a right way?”

    I aspire to inspire, and come what may transpire
    Though the highs and lows, and all the untold
    I will grow, and come out higher

    To be or not to be,
    One of me, or wannabe
    Forget Facebook, Linkedin, or the CV
    I am me, unequivocally and unapologetically
    And without a doubt, undoubtedly
    I’m going to be all that I set out to be

    Here I am
    Living for the times I want to last forever
    But go by in a blink,
    The indelible of the edible, the moments that defy reality and define incredible
    Sure, call me just another millennial,
    But I would never fuck with these moments
    Huh, I guess that’s why they’re called ineffable

    If the world is my oyster,
    Then I’m itching like a crack addict to have a crack at it
    Because take it slow, or take it fast
    This is my life, and hell, I’m gonna make it last

Note: I'm still based in the Bay Area, California for anyone who wants to connect.",1.9609792039664,4.0845213284671535,3.601576917779924,87.65707134003581,79.32846715328468,6.398622779231513,22.748381765597024,7.498158380483773,0.9263031538355596,2120,68,441,31,53,704,274,548,0.052000000000000005,0.8320000000000001,0.11699999999999999,0.9877,3,0,1,0,0,0,52.0,0,2,2,7,15,18,2,1,29,1,37,16,5,4,11,91,76,39,0,7,28,0,1,1,0,7,7,4,1,1,37,23,4,2,13,4,3,8,13,6,0,3,5,8,51,12,62,55,7,57,3,1,3,1,24,26,2,18,20,280,88,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356421710075784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037844350879743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05359828638299485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21498353686732904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04672759071390935,0.0,0.06522694137539345,0.08636285249594558,0.0804436847806504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31308937712846024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206133441890894,0.0,0.0,0.08597402279423376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04943551374211131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008715580287062,0.0,0.0,0.06708046611514981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403461357576685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006040296584833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086542389391072,0.04004857161292078,0.0,0.1306927706165288,0.0,0.06130723748977589,0.0,0.08444306604122707,0.0,0.06778491355789512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866915873269456,0.0,0.08639467302951027,0.0,0.0,0.08098920083101067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306615940000486,0.0,0.0,0.152134611644464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496654537092945,0.0,0.0811655593603089,0.16656967537947232,0.0,0.27071507347079754,0.03744929152361734,0.0,0.4061215249686496,0.0,0.12874017393958148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233433255803837,0.0,0.0,0.16699744080436602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773609614081438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043551936175933,0.0,0.051942760666948494,0.11659770168693845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05314225901783806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864159115221553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705848120997318,0.08587006681141457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309242609973382,0.0729155447131716,0.12191673700453415,0.0,0.0,0.06108334467278386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494871851598172,0.05901202422064571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08170300645856031,0.06121601458517501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224552461983999,0.0,0.2305371905423481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05092553744397619,0.0,0.15062440830080606,0.0,0.08939517318441766,0.0,0.07265906607625246,0.0,0.0,0.10408612159238496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563761476772146,0.12168881645591835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13833669489794376,0.0,0.0,0.07389175821645222,0.0831280354826058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05445283001309551,0.0,0.0,0.04936268793212233
mentalhealth,Geradian98,2020/02/27,"I want to help my sister. My sister unfortunately suffered last night and self-harmed to the extent that she had to go to hospital for stitches. This is the first time myself and her immediate family have found out about her struggles. She has been seeing someone for a couple of weeks about it and they have put her on the necessary drugs to help with her with it all.

As the title says, I want to help her as much as I can. Myself and my sister keep ourselves to ourselves so I can understand if I wasn't the first person that she would go to, but is there anything I can do that will help her. 

Any advice is great. I just don't want to see her in that position again.",5.321249999999999,5.243190389705884,5.876764705882355,83.20794117647061,67.89705882352942,8.858823529411765,26.558823529411764,8.472884824447931,1.5342382352941175,527,13,111,7,8,171,78,136,0.04,0.826,0.134,0.899,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,2,6,3,0,1,6,0,16,1,0,0,1,18,26,10,0,5,3,3,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,7,7,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,2,0,2,4,3,23,1,22,20,3,13,0,1,2,0,20,3,0,1,7,88,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633932765917978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370686355956296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375975615226726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850119668512812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939076658998979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576283911829369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844533026379311,0.0,0.18333444128541465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19005580085600607,0.0,0.0,0.18434690730896766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4483027680407065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486217476318343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13629646507208945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291678382289048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15691295288535048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459991777307265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16808976452967714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297015003110682,0.0,0.0,0.26648552791368785,0.0,0.17443393477001942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14167440923352514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17480162940603394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975000634239966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740689499629269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958700245538007,0.0,0.13412380581459502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187794416806018,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Skumbagpolka,2020/02/27,"I hate myself when im sober and so does every one else Hello. I have been stoned for the past 8 years, daily for for 7 of them since i was 14. Bassicly the only way to keep my speedhead of a brother from stealing from me or trying to physicaly abuse me or forcing me and my friend to take harder drugs as coke, amfetamines and pills. was smoking weed mostly to avoid getting to the bad site of him trough all this years, fucked up my school work because of it and friendships. i have finnaly stopped smoking weed and ciggaretes, one year and 15 days since i stopped smoking ciggs and almost 11 months since i stopped blazing. Now this is my first real breal in years and bassicly i have been treathened whit my life from mye own brother around 3-4 times each of them ending whit a fight already my father left when i was 15 and has just been complaining about the fact that i want to help my grandmother and mother instead of getting a job and trying to pay for a plain ticket to visit him (even tho he pays his x-girlfriends kids to visit him because they are willing to talk trash about me and my brothers) my mother is constantly freaking out because im not handling my older brother that well atm so everytime he's aggresive towards me she just complains that she dont know what to do and that i shouldnt overdramatise everything because om just making it seem worse for myself. So i lock my room and play a lot of video-games, i run into some ""old friends"" now and then just to feel even worse when i hear that people want to hang out at some point just for them to never contact me and blow me off when i try to reach out to them. My grandmother and grandfather bassicly raised me, they kept me safe from my brother for a long amount of time and they understood when i told them about my mental situation. I wasnt really suicidal when i moved in here, i wanted to kill people because i was treated like my own brother wanted me dead constantly. But once my grandfather died all i really wanted was to daze away i guess, i got into just smoking as much as possible at that point. It ended whit me just looking for something new to try which started my endevour into psychadelic at a pretty early age for it. I didn overdo it or anything, but it kept me calm for a while compared to before it.
Now to get back to the now point, im getting used to being sober. My work at school is suffering from it because im really not dealing well about, kinda feels like i have a noose around my neck that tightens every time i do something thats not ""perfection"" my teachers have noticed and tried to help but it just ended whit wasting my time as they are to bussy to actually show affection i would guess. Everything is just fucking clock work and my classmates bassicly just keep waiting for me to get back to my old ways, the friends i grew up whit keeps complaining that i can get depressing when im not drinking and at this point im just extremly tired of fucking everything up. I'm sorry if i ended up wasting some ones time whit this pathetic spuel.... I just needed to know that i might change for the better and vent out a bit after a stresfull week",6.94011625079041,6.264632057784915,6.735809134685539,80.39534169949901,64.69823434991974,9.606089790359457,33.80655673914101,8.754623652393294,2.639655323702514,2504,93,490,32,33,790,278,623,0.107,0.8170000000000001,0.075,-0.9528,1,1,4,0,3,0,40.0,0,0,9,6,41,29,6,1,18,0,30,10,1,3,5,99,69,46,4,9,23,9,2,2,3,4,4,1,1,1,25,32,2,11,6,4,3,6,8,16,2,4,14,4,84,13,87,50,13,87,0,2,1,3,44,30,3,15,51,330,109,8,0.0,0.07062901278664738,0.05817151088442225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05969157367462297,0.0,0.0657819651124601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04905458312768008,0.10613244397169026,0.0,0.0,0.056006279065408365,0.09167400250813028,0.04977250157021276,0.21802902633746124,0.0,0.050724373265602016,0.0,0.0,0.052720880325817836,0.06507951990796138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630602887342691,0.0,0.0,0.12883612679420767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03844401406467952,0.06145608459646457,0.051342667370912635,0.0,0.0618665661479008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052165785031567456,0.0,0.06986337646613748,0.058395858857741685,0.06912956603822963,0.0,0.04979714781109023,0.0,0.2111897891300922,0.0,0.0,0.07874470049257946,0.0,0.1004492865342405,0.0,0.1607229444161806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060281991090936064,0.04258594476991311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05070488904665767,0.0,0.0,0.1381653951063029,0.16532758415877002,0.1868649964949303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047676176940705785,0.0,0.1313359636753701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05885329242086741,0.0,0.0,0.06718566823005633,0.0,0.07991168287382153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3863391540085383,0.0,0.059154489425303415,0.15895436938943724,0.0659504830315455,0.0,0.06552103858066127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476727415480124,0.0,0.042104848535908464,0.0582456206506388,0.0,0.0,0.05275365408617701,0.050058031999438285,0.0,0.0,0.05067894349027433,0.0,0.0,0.039790650711995584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06007363382374902,0.06323760493331312,0.0,0.0,0.04758074652106621,0.06335681283662678,0.0438207735885896,0.04420062935419986,0.04597549938470985,0.05757245146287907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786725478411089,0.12510294739828515,0.06348352273301572,0.1211813979756873,0.04533667544091481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056905223422134076,0.0826532020590813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254057757101108,0.06720218455300217,0.0,0.0606455817986365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785010476047824,0.11456455374307452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12065855993246102,0.0,0.054267404618084686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14793193056530055,0.06700500113982505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178256348092403,0.0,0.06672937468380112,0.042192808603411985,0.0,0.0,0.14951181442637693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520450527894674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044819879094793534,0.04791287752756608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17379759180537632,0.06851380903941558,0.0,0.056960643654741336,0.0,0.2023589935420732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051484564386780736,0.0,0.0,0.1757998779660018,0.09463250641533094,0.0478161626479751,0.0,0.1071944792980983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019204780564378,0.0,0.12149693113513385,0.042345779469503325,0.0,0.0,0.15354952142563486
mentalhealth,severequeer24,2020/02/27,"Wellbutrin and caffeine? I currently take 150mg Wellbutrin and going up to 300mg (once I get off my butt and fill the prescription lol). I’ve noticed that when I have too much caffeine I become very disconnected from reality, and sweaty but not from being overly warm. It’s like I feel that nothing is real and I can’t connect with my feelings, I’m usually very in touch with them and affectionate to my partner. But when I’m like this I don’t feel lovey dovey at all, and not necessarily that I don’t want to be touched but I wouldn’t initiate it. All of those feelings are very odd for me and I only feel like that if I have caffeine. For this reason I don’t drink coffee at all, and tea with a little caffeine usually doesn’t affect me but anything with a higher caffeine give me that dissociated feeling, which sucks because I love tea. Is this normal? Has anyone else experienced this? Does anyone know why it happens? Other than trouble sleeping which I was prescribed another medication for, this is the only side effect and I feel like Wellbutrin is working pretty well for me.",4.62292857142857,6.276310471428572,5.543035714285718,78.69883928571429,70.47619047619048,7.726190476190476,30.267857142857146,8.278499904357787,2.2960714285714285,869,36,157,13,16,285,116,210,0.048,0.7829999999999999,0.16899999999999998,0.9774,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,4,10,1,0,4,1,17,7,2,3,3,39,35,17,0,4,7,0,10,4,1,1,1,0,0,1,17,14,3,0,10,1,0,2,8,2,1,0,1,11,23,8,21,31,4,15,0,0,0,2,4,8,2,1,9,107,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13742810613340534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18328075708021568,0.1342867206113754,0.10785142391548487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989311581141287,0.14474575625314728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469171352816901,0.0,0.0,0.12838915605871898,0.0,0.0,0.10948402689259476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4638760247016138,0.18725894664181347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847357462836874,0.12572494022737196,0.07448456396642092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589615185392994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202728936614176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561176845662719,0.1313568076237796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828699828661783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202942003066806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634436840093416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284112244921874,0.125755850678979,0.1492129705118447,0.0,0.13957489566481207,0.0,0.19935446150546451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13333539771690006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491752644637849,0.0,0.13475177157891385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115490649607406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854100212230184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886887126239013,0.3244153116784461,0.07730273484722792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178389101593984,0.0,0.1182614962337404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954134275402591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Illayrius3,2020/02/27,"Accidentally saw illegal content online, afraid of law enforcement I really need help. Four months ago I accidentally stumbled across a site that appeared legal but showed itself to harbor illicit content. I closed the tab after panicking and now I'm afraid the cops are watching me. It's a fear that has followed me for the past month. I'm also afraid that I'll type in the wrong search on google or duckduckgo, putting me on a watchlist.

In fact, I'm terrified I'm on a watchlist right now or that those sickening thumbnails could be used against me. I wasn't using tor either, I was using Firefox. It should've been impossible. And no, I never visited the site again. Please help.

I really need to get my mind off this.",4.668659588586597,6.630537591240878,5.459973457199733,78.10020570670208,70.89781021897811,8.777438619774388,29.242866622428664,9.339509955726095,2.738640875912409,578,23,104,13,11,188,91,137,0.212,0.7190000000000001,0.07,-0.971,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,5,9,0,7,0,0,3,2,18,20,6,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,0,1,0,4,3,6,0,1,4,2,12,0,13,14,1,24,0,0,2,0,3,11,0,3,9,63,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17669634055923822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15940622417122535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15915087720124782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243046152306869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414306678259963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672169068260176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012691228248265,0.0,0.3182107910280851,0.0,0.0,0.2956052239430891,0.1537376049852688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19028554071519246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188073582621196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20038433910653666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553951611094254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17022896831742826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5164781500012947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21793892817569246,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sharrps,2020/02/27,"How do I get out of it? First of all I feel very weird open about it.
The last 2 years been the worse of my life. Downhill that I choose.
I moved to a new place trying to improve myself and doing better and for a better future for me and my wife.
Quit my old job when I was happy and making money.
Since than I stopped working trying to find something and everything that comes either is not enough money or not for me.
Money is about to end soon, family stressing me all day long about me not working.
I lost motivation I lost my confidence in myself starting to question myself all the time.
I got depressed for the first time of my life and I can’t control it.
My brain pushes me to be happy for what I have but my body doing the opposite .
I started to feel sick all the time different pains different issues. Seems like from anxiety or stress.
I’m all day home, can’t find what to do.
My brain always push me away from doing the right things like working or doing something with myself.
I know my self nature is not to be depressed and when I really think about what I have I do see the positive things but after just things doesn’t work I hate the life I choose.
Fear that the decision I made to move to a “better place” just made my life worse.
Had to learn in 2 years new language and everything just seems hard while all my friends doing amazing..
I don’t want to disappoint myself. I know a good routine or a good job will take me out of it.
Scared I will hurt myself mentally by keeping this situation...
I want to wake up happy and have something to live for. I’m just looking for that and can’t find it..
Any thoughts or tips?
definitely don’t want any medicine of stuff like that I want to be strong enough to work on things independently. I owe it to myself.",2.4380237430167604,4.367687840782125,3.5396054469273786,89.61153107541901,77.01675977653632,6.3744413407821225,22.081354748603353,7.292943589461545,0.6784550279329609,1389,39,290,17,32,448,155,358,0.14,0.696,0.16399999999999998,0.7474,6,0,3,0,0,2,32.0,0,0,0,16,14,27,1,4,15,0,28,10,4,7,6,66,58,21,0,4,16,1,3,3,1,2,6,0,1,1,20,15,0,3,17,0,4,5,10,13,0,2,9,5,50,14,48,44,9,40,0,6,2,0,4,11,0,8,27,202,70,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06230863605305525,0.0,0.0,0.10184598513069587,0.0,0.057285272844738874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035502238387692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19868372496709266,0.0,0.08317810687406202,0.0,0.16718833641628045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450505454788613,0.0,0.0,0.08398762672580104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658665118201548,0.0,0.128993197634497,0.0,0.0,0.1564735469736261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632409164399801,0.1547482665349229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459998343872653,0.0,0.07059300679850099,0.08426416842531374,0.07572616683915658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20532505452156846,0.1273908448616407,0.0,0.0,0.05785440268241266,0.0,0.03912326507714719,0.0,0.0,0.1256165775023579,0.059890757818845224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391429660636819,0.06708043934879672,0.07393143723758629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511373204477116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016377620966185,0.0,0.0,0.0781583733302629,0.14861960112592196,0.0665594310913381,0.0,0.0,0.08230745218002596,0.06103962118270472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21156824632138152,0.10975212100377243,0.0,0.06612304107644112,0.06626907868186943,0.06288284136320223,0.0,0.16348723156973125,0.0,0.0,0.1417121678621531,0.049984968975390114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546442868333895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15917750865349248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446448926426636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857708824233915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968076773162963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564735469736261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388607260518219,0.07964726412828929,0.0,0.0,0.04797195289227945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394965365476239,0.0,0.0,0.07497092394597893,0.0,0.059672037957555026,0.13634130066599584,0.07811927693164336,0.0,0.0,0.061943972830004086,0.08417160421456607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17294572365560884,0.0,0.0,0.1060051138289289,0.0,0.0,0.0626055222506809,0.1715563955089325,0.0,0.08572309367346616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05630267979906665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19899569151915225,0.04798198835744945,0.0,0.059448719646997876,0.1309945991675425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016812525867277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617862988399361,0.17667168118683454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725784974595288,0.0,0.15262430306433658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644436478557694
mentalhealth,Jose98bp,2020/02/27,"Why am I such a bad student? I can’t stop losing courses, it’s not hard, I just don’t care at all. I hate it and I don’t believe anything I’ve seen would be useful. (Industrial engineering) 

I used to think I was a good for nothing lazy piece of shit but recently I got a new job and I’m very proud of how hard I’m working, I’m reminded to take it easy since I work fast and I don’t even take breaks. I’ve proposed a lot of changes that will optimize the capacity of the business, the boss has asked me to make statistical analysis on how my proposals would help, he’s really taking me seriously. 

Why do I have such different approaches to fairly similar things? Why can’t I make a simple homework since I procrastinate excessively but can’t even take a break when I’m working? Is it possible for me to translate that mentality to my classes to become at least a mediocre student? How?",2.8708471454880287,4.551937447513815,5.088375690607733,80.0735211786372,75.07734806629834,8.804567219152856,29.746224677716388,9.3871,2.776414069981584,702,32,143,18,15,245,105,181,0.07400000000000001,0.765,0.16,0.9398,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,6,9,8,2,0,10,0,16,1,1,8,1,21,34,9,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,3,3,18,3,16,27,4,11,0,1,1,0,3,3,1,1,5,86,25,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791993211345524,0.0,0.12260147597675528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949935048053144,0.0,0.14483770006403784,0.0,0.1477538234767244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13370954564731768,0.0,0.1387324414019346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13701705234673428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323809906475987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109996951613548,0.10488744273859207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349576461315906,0.12947706244249796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790272835840768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13013969492653932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671603912772488,0.0,0.11149351991875127,0.0,0.0,0.17507861854260373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321618097781635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665921627154078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258357319304403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478445994731843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401388870828642,0.0,0.1294883918960438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461692535694122,0.21696652838690805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964184407300523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3944143850252421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712591875433735,0.08403146394554685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265317668300389,0.0,0.10820712773756468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3550098510108353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2864221050319885,0.0,0.0,0.18632116936945087,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,altaccountcusppl,2020/02/27,"I don't know anymore I'm 18(m) and fucking depressed.
I spend half my time getting pissed with whoever wants to at the time, if no-one is there I do it alone.
I don't sleep anymore, my appetite is wavering, I hate A-Levels and have barely been to school in the past few months. 
My friends worry for me and I feel so incredibly guilty for it, they deserved someone who can give back to them and not just be a fucking burden all the time.
My arm is stricken with scars from past self harm, I'm on antidepressants which feel like they're doing nothing. I have counselling but haven't been in two weeks.
People are always saying I have wasted potential artistically and musically which makes me despise myself even more. I have no idea where I want to go in life, let alone what I want to do after A-Levels.
I've written suicide notes in the past, have gone to attempt it but end up being too scared to commit to anything.
I don't want to be alive, I don't want to be dead. I feel like I'm just perpetually existing in an emotionless limbo where my only feelings are occasional self pity and overwhelming emptiness.
I don't know what else to do.. help me please...",4.0410007639419385,5.337549922077926,4.9319225872167065,83.90527883880827,71.42424242424242,7.513216195569138,27.441049146931487,7.928766900206844,1.5941823784059084,916,32,184,12,17,298,131,231,0.225,0.685,0.09,-0.9881,0,2,0,0,0,3,29.0,0,0,2,1,9,14,5,2,6,0,28,6,3,1,2,29,51,10,2,6,6,0,4,2,1,0,1,1,0,2,8,8,0,0,7,1,1,2,8,11,0,2,4,5,26,3,25,42,3,23,0,3,0,2,9,10,3,1,13,118,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517512637705645,0.0,0.0,0.10112848278941834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24106400306689865,0.0,0.0,0.1000145584510752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345441646531656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104679601362359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152853072843253,0.0,0.10764566816440484,0.0,0.0,0.08027401262007174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458109451595598,0.17365205005610915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389915004685072,0.22471791319184664,0.06349804280182328,0.11658932192663485,0.06907225241977431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11999258131588646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08146365913359241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13720042881108904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335870641453479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427977099956315,0.08584514568205726,0.11875363441413808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112686129821785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700963805340616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661798631563193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243433104019612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3480623275899204,0.08425842175633487,0.0,0.0,0.13341107986848105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665106485439456,0.1216796943769075,0.12300188713843414,0.0,0.0,0.253579100848128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162472766401332,0.0,0.10297786767807783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329417026645737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21260752772924812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187239451502899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3584282252436725,0.0,0.09748961440798594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234266774772175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,localtesco,2020/02/27,"I don't know if this is normal or not.  I don't wanna date real people anymore, it's starting again. I don't want it to but at the same time, it gives me so much false hope that it's intoxicating. I know it sounds crazy like ""huh? You just like something n you have a right to not have to like a character"" but you see for me it's really unhealthy and I've been like this my whole life.

 I get so obsessed over one thing that I convince myself that it's real and I really believe it. I would do things that in my head would make it finally happen. I used to like this YouTuber is yr7 and I had her book ok? My brain told me that if I read a bit of that book every day and put it under my pillow along with a piece of cloth that I would wake up 21 years old and in a relationship with her. I'd understand if I was much younger but I was 12. Fucking 12, I consider myself smart, I was smart then too, still I forced myself to do these ritualistic things every day until I just stopped liking her.

A period of time of not being obsessed with something left me with numbness in my throat. Little did I know it would happen over and over and over again. Gorillaz and other things that gave me a ""reason to live"" I really convinced myself that Gorillaz was real and locked away in a cave, I got ""pretty"" every day I went outside in case I met them, blasted my music in case they heard it and much more.

 I want to stop the constant cycle and I tell myself I will but it's not my choice and I just keep falling back. I don't want to live like that anymore, the feeling of numb and empty that follows so quickly after and how it made all my relationships so boring for me. It's useless. I'm useless. I want to be able to live and simply like something, a character without being so obsessed and losing my fucking mind over it. All I want to do is enjoy something, but I'm just not able to do it anymore. You might be thinking ""just tell yourself it's not real lol"" haha the number of times I have and the number of times people around me have told me what my brain tells me isn't real but it doesn't work. Even now when I'm much smarter than my 10-year-old self I do the same thing. It makes my life so very sour. You probably think I'm crazy. I wouldn't blame you, I can't put a quarter of what happens in my brain into words. I'm so sorry. I feel so useless.

sorry if I didn't explain it very well but I just really want some help and I don't know what to do, maybe this is normal and I'm blowing things out of proportion.  
[ ](https://twitter.com/compose/tweet)",1.2978517823639777,3.2876099437148194,3.019132270168857,91.67327626641656,80.89493433395873,5.525891181988745,20.381332082551594,6.5822867389190165,0.17998198874296412,1992,54,434,19,52,660,213,533,0.138,0.736,0.125,-0.2975,0,0,4,0,0,0,60.0,0,6,2,2,26,29,2,3,16,4,41,13,6,6,2,99,86,43,0,19,25,0,2,8,0,7,5,2,1,1,47,27,0,3,11,3,0,5,17,12,1,2,16,6,76,17,53,59,13,53,0,4,1,2,25,22,2,8,34,310,123,4,0.12563643687115147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18689637878778595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05592153264337131,0.0,0.0,0.05901978406952381,0.048303332439742615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07077462064177932,0.0,0.0,0.06858122475571661,0.0,0.0,0.21037772101881388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788417754790978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215376622081925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041490840823969664,0.0,0.15878117507855294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352555743460303,0.0,0.0,0.06881428776591406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614886140880705,0.032819926406236585,0.06026095918149006,0.0,0.0,0.050241467836394806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664982930668204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446961517135813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042105727666152185,0.0,0.0,0.06239266498262391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055835718868328686,0.0,0.0,0.13809300005541694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825217813387953,0.0,0.08874073087294837,0.2455184676547684,0.06296035781056651,0.16640891328517932,0.0,0.0,0.07027751815143336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059440117164720724,0.08386329719441432,0.0,0.06310934376096779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664020267940257,0.06342849315881947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18471447402799834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309703299241112,0.0,0.0,0.13183430617279038,0.0,0.042567250560217436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710048622377857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06390871170616433,0.06772866419374889,0.0,0.0,0.1262993200722166,0.0,0.0,0.06283521793762392,0.3575044261895385,0.1609718371289747,0.06458759091127816,0.0,0.13488651507567098,0.0,0.05364641531106748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05005798699099576,0.0,0.06553310197268189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934421342887333,0.0,0.1406397050706684,0.044463058332296385,0.0,0.050166710388251566,0.10503768685152803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647176752132494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504017981859977,0.08050275577005707,0.0,0.0,0.14651923336206032,0.0,0.0,0.12005099946160523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539598079489496,0.0,0.05425477149575638,0.0,0.10366321813078642,0.2223108767833244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05648112253833295,0.058233117838578326,0.0,0.07013429751540894,0.0,0.06055452089854256,0.0,0.045732411182469804,0.0,0.0,0.1784970401355863,0.0,0.0,0.08090574619263552
mentalhealth,Ricecream22,2020/02/27,"How to cope with terrible memories & trauma. Background info: 
I’ve (f19) suffered with mental health all my life. I’ve always been a super shy and anxious person. When I was 12 I was diagnosed with depression & for years I didn’t get proper help so my coping mechanisms weren’t great. In high school I did drugs, drank a lot, & slept around. I developed an eating disorder also. 


I was severely bullied from middle school to high school by people I didn’t even know because of my partying & my body image. Now years later i’m in a much better place and this is the happiest i’ve been. But lately all these awful memories from the past have resurfaced and i’m having a hard time coping with them & making peace. 

What are some healthy ways I can come to terms with this trauma and be at peace again?",3.3509584086799293,5.469084746835442,4.270922242314652,84.54329113924051,74.9493670886076,7.2990958408679925,22.678119349005428,8.192908349453996,1.353173960216998,642,18,120,11,14,207,104,158,0.187,0.647,0.166,-0.1779,1,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,2,8,8,0,0,7,1,15,8,2,2,2,20,23,9,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,11,2,0,2,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,11,1,13,3,17,11,6,20,0,2,0,0,3,8,0,2,10,73,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470996490688363,0.09854484614593036,0.6416046878096838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379436108995055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054295192401723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219500015563217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047434103779286,0.0,0.1315511663204233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201861377038747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020052405250796,0.12020590744102255,0.0,0.0,0.1357332426021188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734342939726082,0.12118542234774132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822316725183949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061875790933235725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057161165388415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609173934412336,0.0,0.0,0.12588759452335746,0.0,0.0,0.07938242060370727,0.2502596550461081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06508708684328891,0.0,0.13359636608441086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365196866671955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068658456983592,0.0,0.0,0.07905422729996336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935152147702202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706108931986489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305667000847525,0.08210578246058438,0.10341018579982156,0.1237361511114951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3595782822814502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379436108995055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690586058831477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094005746805587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525325491211846
mentalhealth,ThePoolPlayer2016,2020/02/27,"Trump Is Considering Putting The Mentally Disadvantaged Under Surveillance - The SafeHome Proposal [https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2019/08/22/white-house-considers-new-project-seeking-links-between-mental-health-violent-behavior/](https://www.washingtonpost.com/politics/2019/08/22/white-house-considers-new-project-seeking-links-between-mental-health-violent-behavior/)

A lot of the mentally ill already state that helicopters and law enforcement have been tracking them (Prior to the government doing this).

This is profiling. This is hatred. This is discrimmination.",37.91533333333333,49.37931875555557,22.008888888888887,-46.69999999999999,5.8888888888888875,14.26666666666667,44.55555555555557,11.979248473330829,8.512022222222223,524,16,26,12,5,130,35,45,0.191,0.809,0.0,-0.8658,0,0,0,0,0,0,55.0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,7,1,0,0,0,3,7,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,6,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,23,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106210121343917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4057548562745298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16226408489887745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7693761982888663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3686715037302189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19186907112122206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Indemnivacation,2020/02/27,"Anyone else taking Citalopram? I’ve been in Citalopram for about three and a half months now. Started at 10mg and got bumped up to 20mg. It really helped the anxiety portion of my issues (anxiety/depression (undiagnosed)), but it’s making me extremely tired. At first it was just some drowsiness after initially taking the dosage at night, which was fine for sleeping, but it feels like it’s making me tired almost all the time. Anyone else on Citalopram have this issue?",5.414950166112956,7.634925279069765,5.392126245847177,78.28593023255816,69.46511627906976,8.170099667774089,27.40199335548173,8.841846274778883,2.35731096345515,378,13,62,7,7,118,63,86,0.11599999999999999,0.823,0.061,-0.7159,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,4,0,4,3,1,2,1,11,11,4,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,3,2,12,7,3,13,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,2,8,41,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827676043322582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619661240775613,0.0,0.0,0.2489730166249152,0.36483666322535424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334165020980753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974515042598009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002005997310089,0.1271885428076099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514368410965064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239119278645784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11933339219006757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37164545616230427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697911547466057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376800565899776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14210617724719826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670741854055996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140540517668665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17816399951466103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12601438977631274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26772096482440816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038138877257682,0.4092510606963763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,neilat21,2020/02/27,"We need to keep each other safe, so I wrote a short poem. I roll on the back of others for guidance‬,
‪I always believe I am strong‬,
Everybody needs an opinion to help and encourage them along‬,
‪The road may seem tough at times but it’s always worth the ride‬,
‪Never be afraid to ask for help everyone needs a guide‬. 👥",5.262812499999999,5.68564965625,5.400000000000002,84.845,68.0625,8.9,28.5,8.841846274778883,1.97395,254,8,52,4,4,80,54,64,0.02,0.7959999999999999,0.185,0.8625,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,1,0,2,4,0,1,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,13,10,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,5,2,8,7,1,6,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,3,2,29,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4197812321834953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23581791095712756,0.0,0.0,0.1939632090520448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28419721467966186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24103385759695145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33815315197088963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242096903963951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5611162822895361,0.19454927579141668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296371852143349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708788842986747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tazmxx,2020/02/27,"Help? We knew eachother but never spoke, but recently “kalopsia” started talking to me and made me feel special but I know this won’t last forever. I’m scared that I will get hurt again. It’s been exactly a month now and within this time period we opened up to the point that it felt like we knew eachother for years. Now I’m scared that I’ll mess everything up because of my emotions. What should I do?",2.904973544973544,4.798720802469138,3.636437389770727,89.60111111111117,75.54320987654322,7.097707231040566,26.386243386243386,7.957251820313856,1.5112243386243387,319,12,66,5,7,101,59,81,0.17800000000000002,0.726,0.09699999999999999,-0.8504,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,3,0,0,0,3,6,0,2,2,0,5,0,0,1,2,18,16,5,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,6,3,9,2,7,7,0,16,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,12,40,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14960646057563987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760657710274905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205687128115078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409231204300868,0.0,0.2356427997637477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12822242616364196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450062958440065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627284265710779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487705063802954,0.20005100046539212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990038155864015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322234346285233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19589282761495344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892839275124208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320023223313969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423237866283297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4914187883412855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17371035947658975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972602311712018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431070514051351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804317991140074
mentalhealth,belterman,2020/02/27,"I feel like I am slowly zoning out into non-existence It's been like thks for a few days now and I have no idea what to do. I am scared I'll be like this forever. Everything feels so foreign. Even my normal motor functions feel involuntary. I feel trappped inside my head, looking through a monitor at what I am going to do next. It's terrifying to feel alien in my own body. 

I have never been diagnosed, since I have never been to a therapist. The waiting lists in my country are insane. I have inquired about seeing a counsellor before but have not been gotten back to.

 I have always thought I had anxiety due to the frequency and severity of my panic attacks. I recently had a horrible panic attack and ever since then I feel like I am slowly drifting away and the world is closing in on me. 

Any help would be much appreciated. I think I just need someone to talk to. Thanks!",2.5254607276436616,4.845167000000004,4.4759333560013586,81.09778986739204,78.42196531791906,7.538796327779667,26.361441686501195,8.4952907291091,2.1651185991159463,693,28,129,15,17,236,107,173,0.17300000000000001,0.7070000000000001,0.12,-0.8932,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,7,10,2,3,8,0,23,3,2,0,3,27,38,7,0,3,3,0,6,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,10,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,8,8,22,5,20,27,3,22,0,0,2,0,2,10,0,0,14,97,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11166680636362472,0.0,0.0,0.09126195517117536,0.0,0.10266415501045463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053482752693265,0.1260871872489598,0.10319304650291856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419600903242864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490681571987857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654918128579568,0.0,0.0,0.13621219490365802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863914869505653,0.12139338314909187,0.0,0.0,0.12061209520299207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4071393507259897,0.1917478569182194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627008359375298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772995899822174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995276502946843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514977115691214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26225725400653976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269587195136364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865390411682197,0.09950907510559917,0.20700969593121035,0.0,0.14272533883594107,0.0,0.13148945640348522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3149142396233848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250827486009956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435960370002614,0.0,0.10694161082671344,0.0,0.0,0.15161004960372945,0.0,0.22202654583906667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370891061118653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786647606778757,0.0,0.12355516177091,0.0,0.1558188539884345,0.0,0.08599121634263855,0.0,0.10654138953923084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533324324115218,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lexiex_,2020/02/27,"I don’t know if I can post it here, but I would like to finally know what is wrong with me 
I’m crying almost every day since I remember. It can be caused by anything and often happens in public. It can be a bad mark, someone being mean or even someone raising their voice. Everyone thinks I’m weird because I cry so easily. I cried maybe 3 times watching movies, but when it comes to situations including me I’m in tears much more often. I can’t really control it. I also often cry at home usually because I’m overwhelmed by everything and I feel like I’m failing in every possible way. I had a few panic attacks in my life, but they don’t happen often. Are you able to help me somehow? I’m tired of being like this.

Sorry for bad English",1.6710087719298237,3.7930386447368463,4.043578947368424,84.12071929824562,80.3157894736842,6.684912280701754,24.607017543859648,7.793537801064563,1.5385696491228074,582,22,113,10,15,202,98,152,0.29,0.607,0.10400000000000001,-0.9888,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,2,2,10,11,1,2,2,0,14,2,0,2,0,24,28,10,0,2,5,0,1,3,0,1,2,1,1,0,7,4,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,1,3,17,3,13,22,3,13,0,2,1,0,5,5,0,8,8,73,24,1,0.12239950589603216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256542458288112,0.0,0.0,0.09788284064333344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072436423864008,0.0,0.0,0.13924710812312974,0.0,0.0,0.20439694958482008,0.1492272054461624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573800905086188,0.0,0.10543633633650344,0.0,0.0,0.13728145370363787,0.0,0.0,0.5378004391551028,0.07893755544446131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808437192670961,0.0,0.20625372552961813,0.11695797319924925,0.11000478353365288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618888678746892,0.08744223146870307,0.0,0.134082675868521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164749576665708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204180873125848,0.0,0.12277668425942018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345351348336823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645439079779993,0.17939464782884354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296675528433428,0.1333289445654984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997772030123498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436094477221881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798705203407205,0.11722489229991898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841225769547124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865477982252622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125013611879154,0.13758217296540326,0.0,0.0,0.2074174082885968,0.0,0.0,0.13701622585546452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842866110274488,0.0,0.0,0.07137213619872873,0.14068022633279062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480576327253774,0.0,0.0,0.09715503055222907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694909717515513,0.13382464510097192,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bargoni,2020/02/27,"Young and anxious not dysfunctional I don't get why all these viagra companies are marketing themselves with handsome male models to entice young guys and then call it erectile dysfunction. Young guys have psychological problems - they are not dysfunctional.

Its performance anxiety. I am a 29-year-old Londoner and suddenly started having erection problems out of no where about a year ago. It rocked my world. I didn't know which way to turn or what professional i even needed to see. Just had viagra companies trying to make money out of me. Spent 5 months waiting for an NHS therapist referral - the system is broken.

I have found a cool community in BETA testing for anyone like me who is not able to get to professionals in person. There are doctors and therapists answering questions for free and I found them really helpful.

[https://join.slack.com/t/mojo-men-community/shared\_invite/enQtOTU1ODYxMjMzMDU2LWFhYzg2MjY0MjI2YjcwMTQ4NDEwNjFhZGZhNTE3MzkyZmU3N2Y4MmMwYjNiYjYwZWNjNzkwOWI3ZTg0MTEwMjk](https://join.slack.com/t/mojo-men-community/shared_invite/enQtOTU1ODYxMjMzMDU2LWFhYzg2MjY0MjI2YjcwMTQ4NDEwNjFhZGZhNTE3MzkyZmU3N2Y4MmMwYjNiYjYwZWNjNzkwOWI3ZTg0MTEwMjk)",16.73600105374078,22.20012078767124,11.016027397260276,36.08645416227608,46.6027397260274,10.519704952581666,33.83350895679663,10.560738912317856,4.6103873551106425,1009,33,100,22,13,275,107,146,0.113,0.7929999999999999,0.094,-0.204,0,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,2,1,5,6,0,0,5,1,12,3,0,1,1,24,24,7,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,4,7,8,0,1,5,1,3,0,6,2,0,0,5,2,11,5,17,19,1,17,0,0,1,0,10,6,0,2,10,68,18,5,0.16313806095193098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461204784654205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248001700997183,0.1842995734727996,0.0,0.11406992536644005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16658220016059916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669787181358357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775115066705396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3577449268298745,0.0,0.0,0.17046580714445386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32306465774363496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934800345334222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965641187030722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970101615936015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889592247321804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021524382394326,0.0,0.0,0.1209648050809923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17118595219338528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14244586229487646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31220218410923434,0.0,0.0,0.1827519641653507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451041923460072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299999130227353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546995920876835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3788317252602825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076003472279422,0.17744736404221748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294913993319483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720672550694622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101111251232297
mentalhealth,TubsAlwaysWins,2020/02/27,"I need advice on what to do So this is kind of going to be a rant but at the end of the day I need more opinions on what to do. 

I (19m) have been struggling with depression for about 7 years now. A little more than 2 years ago I got really bad and was sent to a 3 month inpatient program to try and help. Flash forward two years. 

My family is very involved in the company I work for. My dad is very high up in it, my mom and sister work from a different location. This company has been very involved in my life since I was born. I also live on site in housing I rent from the company. I have two roommates that also work for the company.

I recently told I was being evicted for having my girlfriend in my room. I was pretty pissed about this as i am and adult and this is a room I pay rent for. (I struggle alot with them treating me like a child I think)

Last friday i tried to kill myself. My roommate found me in the act and I guess told my boss, who told my dad. Today someone from HR drove 6 hours down here to talk to me and they want me to take a paid leave of absence and go to a intensive therapy thing. 

​

What should I do? I dont make enough to move out right now, so they either need to give me a raise if they want to keep me or I need to get another job (im going to quit if I need another job). Should I take a leave of absence or not? I just dont know what to do. Please ask questions if it can help you come to a conclusion",0.7148903822848922,2.366106680511184,2.8320898975432414,93.98159744408943,81.23642172523962,6.361969813815137,21.016745620799824,7.372421405659032,0.4762203150820752,1113,32,265,16,29,377,160,313,0.115,0.8190000000000001,0.066,-0.9517,6,0,0,0,0,1,31.0,0,1,4,5,10,9,2,2,18,0,26,2,1,2,0,41,55,19,1,12,9,4,0,1,1,2,1,0,4,2,13,12,0,1,5,0,4,9,3,6,0,2,14,0,45,3,48,37,5,42,0,1,0,0,25,20,1,9,16,179,58,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925030819046556,0.08096188106119252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607917425927455,0.0,0.09896010740608584,0.11098053400009067,0.0,0.191542853934244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538475077574532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762598873822596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786759601975679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058902729230089865,0.0,0.0786656468549663,0.0,0.0,0.09542435581176256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21408500892551285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089461563743511,0.09437220496810823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610135487882492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001427704245663,0.0,0.0,0.047718127944896084,0.08761567971578631,0.15572126791509425,0.0,0.07304796362678309,0.0,0.10061445058166732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243820873435,0.09649914820338328,0.0,0.0,0.08994537090738575,0.10538691401795793,0.0,0.0,0.09865615030583054,0.0,0.18126935795521526,0.08118165604258819,0.101047290172797,0.0951100721812572,0.050194654334194,0.0744492170467047,0.0,0.19341856102676672,0.0,0.0,0.06451174657287277,0.04462106917673801,0.09154043711963196,0.08064939692455017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06096600424800872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069690137973022,0.07290174808958952,0.09707334892549592,0.0,0.3386141855881276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025705828917504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929192845907396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231473108074264,0.09714471255505384,0.0,0.0,0.05851075520834925,0.0,0.09018108454495258,0.0,0.0,0.07799854508851381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555224276625835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738681144380087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909637853173114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373432648320407,0.07341062894453522,0.0,0.0,0.10444813190189796,0.0,0.060678101953335166,0.05852299533222501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657373963032111,0.2618200090387597,0.0,0.12401927627878268,0.0,0.17843965435236014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22607978967030345,0.10774205412673593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994762286504402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098053400009067,0.1764478704420791
mentalhealth,dickiedonovan,2020/02/27,"Psychiatric Ward Hi, everyone!

Hope everyone's okay?

I wrote a piece about my stay on a psychiatric ward last year - would like to share this and see what you all think!

[https://vocal.media/psyche/flow-sknm0e9r](https://vocal.media/psyche/flow-sknm0e9r)

Has anyone else got any similar experiences?",12.243000000000002,17.543847300000003,7.5900000000000025,54.89500000000001,63.5,10.2,25.5,9.888512548439397,3.5026,252,7,32,7,5,68,36,40,0.0,0.754,0.24600000000000002,0.8571,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,6,7,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,4,3,4,2,4,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,3,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18905594204465773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19439065368775774,0.2848535090872163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322412008228976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5312998379829367,0.0,0.2719465630378363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22234953345839112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27612608762323154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22661478643338726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582136203759385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221537517366308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29632105624133565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17813721372428193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974899187215869,0.0,0.0,0.17902895451438286
mentalhealth,Bra333,2020/02/27,"Can i get back to life? Hey everybody am 16 a stundent in my last year,  and am living in Syria. My story began about 6 mounths ago. I had a really bad time 6 mounths ago i was going through a lot of stress cuz we're living in War and i have to study and get high marks so i can travel from this country and build my life cuz nobody can live in this country , so my parents were putting a lot of pressure on me and i was thinking so much of how to get out of this country and what if i couldn't get out of this country and i was suffering from anxiety so it was like Hell to me . So i started Studying and i hated that cuz i was forced to do that and i starder to lose sleep because of anxiety and i think that effected my eyes and my vision started to be worse without knowing that. Untill one day i felt that the life is different and there is something wrong with my vision , so i thought i had depersonalisation and derealasation so i started trying to heal my self and at the same time i had to study so u can't imagane how much i suffered , untill i went to a doctor to see if there is something wrong with my eyes and the result was i should wear glases so i was kinda happy thinking that am not mentally ill and it's just about my eyes , so when i bought my glasses i started comparing the vision when i put glasses and when i take them off and that was an extra stress cuz i spent days comparing untill i realized that maybe i didn't have a mental health and its all about my eyes not my mind , i was kinda happy but then i started having issues with my ears so i started to put the blame on my ears that they r the cause of this problem , so i cant get out of this situation and be normal cuz am suffering from anxiety asking my self what if the problem was from your ears , eyes , neck....... can u give me advices on how to get back to normal life and help me out of this am ayoung man and i want to live",2.472456575682384,3.648060662531016,4.120198511166255,88.67722084367247,75.12903225806451,6.788089330024817,25.158808933002486,7.233258080335977,0.9742823821339948,1489,49,329,16,31,500,167,403,0.129,0.826,0.045,-0.9825,2,0,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,2,2,26,18,3,3,14,0,37,19,11,11,1,69,66,53,1,10,8,1,1,1,0,1,8,3,0,3,21,29,0,0,8,1,2,6,7,15,0,1,21,10,57,3,52,41,7,44,1,4,6,0,11,14,1,7,25,246,78,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242139377587766,0.14953429775367846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19357210626604685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885160632862315,0.0,0.0,0.12971288347295065,0.07042492440276822,0.05141620109169595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664600719285072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879167005197568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812303918756602,0.0,0.08633113813154765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098485541229293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644020862225423,0.08091183756346344,0.04793546077442767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795745915946008,0.0,0.0832736659568281,0.0,0.08965526506003997,0.0,0.0,0.056534974611914125,0.08911559471743648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803473211967368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046354051366341714,0.06875279602863882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383027319571942,0.04120692452364535,0.0,0.29791429683446263,0.0,0.0,0.09436097948435487,0.0,0.14341496414762087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473633743109528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17000074286678138,0.0,0.08516485640238614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400721562663675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528125793732162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715465717162847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365563631127223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16141440168069407,0.0,0.2543714091726074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05403385257628187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721240031993238,0.0,0.17598139073339625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480781538020264,0.08440635939750651,0.0,0.0,0.12986649034543835,0.0,0.0,0.35820084534558266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932348471254303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341727856574267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162135468471238,0.0,0.06696086274552249,0.09836501584723928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0572650213384075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04974912943970252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818907357877486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08130600019027237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859552154344687,0.0,0.18443700913554475,0.0,0.05431570193044725
mentalhealth,meetmattshep,2020/02/27,"How I deal with my Codependence Hey Guys, I did a video where I break down how I deal with my codependence.  I would love to share, some of the practical ways I have been able to deal with this in my relationships. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GYr9MYZotEQ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GYr9MYZotEQ)",13.199924242424245,16.25829065909091,7.293636363636362,68.8937878787879,51.5,10.412121212121212,26.03030303030303,10.504223727775694,2.3515848484848485,255,5,39,5,3,64,30,44,0.0,0.838,0.162,0.7757,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,2,0,7,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,9,2,8,2,1,5,0,0,0,1,8,3,0,1,0,28,10,0,0.2612813237168038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8081087157828009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25870958907083297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358165957583722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805183598661136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20739295312184616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560675584101355,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skittykitty12,2020/02/27,"I have freak outs? Ok so normally I'm a calm person, I can do normal day stuff but I have a bad habit of procrastinating. So I've been having these problems with freaking out. I'm talking about hitting myself out of anger and screaming, at first I thought it was bipolar manic disorder but I don't fluctuate between moods I just go from getting really mad after build up of many different situations to being ok after a few hours. I've only bit someone once but other than that I normally keep a good level. Along with the anger though it comes with a big feeling of panic. Idk what to do is there anyway  that I can get help? What is wrong with me??",2.192615384615386,4.488494261538462,3.922307692307694,84.75269230769231,79.46153846153845,6.461538461538463,23.84615384615385,7.61054688173877,1.2933846153846151,514,18,99,8,13,172,90,130,0.3,0.602,0.098,-0.9887,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,7,15,3,1,6,2,13,1,0,0,0,21,23,7,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,9,10,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,10,0,1,3,2,10,4,22,18,2,14,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,5,72,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468392500961839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919981435215588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15149142481812267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341785158178773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18374064438456375,0.20155559419047367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892221695559085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495899874214338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18376355811541145,0.0,0.09994767012991383,0.14750653603805036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787805733013967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17319079882008995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631616966737216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17829868240339028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5169286905798139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18728961931780644,0.0,0.13375263877799806,0.0,0.20633873111205495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15355782448466285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682782757562013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126631013010659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19767871434362788,0.0,0.0,0.14900915474451626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20132241870705245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413529717041311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17278567058465655,0.13961652007054948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922798806041875,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leafyleifster,2020/02/27,"Don't actively feel depressed, but physical symptoms are there So like, I've been diagnosed with PDD when I was 11 (currently 17 turning 18) and mostly have it under control with prescribed antidepressants.

However, despite compliance with my dosages, which does help with the emotional part, I've started reexperiencing these stuff:

-Becoming reclusive and not leaving my house or even my room for long periods of time

-Severe lack of appetite to the point I barely eat anything (1 small meal a day, down from easily 4 or more average sized meals a day - my friends all knew me as a black hole)

-Room is a mess and I'm just not motivated to clean up or do things I like to do.

-Sleeping a lot more and more frequently. I went from sleeping around 7~9 hours a night to last a day to sleeping over 12 hours, and even after I wake up I have to nap twice (roughly 5 hours total) and by then it's evening already. 

-Dressing more sloppily because I don't feel up to deciding on what shirt to wear so I show up to college in pajamas.

For reference I'm 17F, and on long term antidepressants and antipsychotic medication.

Does anyone have any advice or tips on getting out of this slump? 

Thanks in advance!!",6.544304677623259,7.212628676991148,6.7349178255372975,75.52876106194694,65.3274336283186,10.350948166877373,36.496839443742104,10.290406445055957,3.8155458912768636,955,46,175,22,14,307,149,226,0.07400000000000001,0.812,0.114,0.88,2,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,3,9,6,0,0,9,0,11,12,6,2,2,34,21,18,0,1,8,0,3,2,1,0,3,0,3,0,8,14,3,1,6,2,0,2,4,2,0,1,4,4,13,4,37,17,11,39,0,1,1,0,2,18,0,6,21,113,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403116558323392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006661535151346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631441339743788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875000204457961,0.0,0.10444974415749332,0.11299154852462005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737325297611526,0.14018041356942573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235892998978072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24557139276821446,0.0,0.1093216602676432,0.1288277867665072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22214857625596532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987755828126651,0.0,0.1427752963178808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515013877133728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835576505388066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806314551493377,0.0,0.06631388897643732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507619776974076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3749912830099716,0.1464562089239234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034620871824441,0.0,0.1343969004475916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401981195964447,0.0,0.0,0.22465202316906036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790842250057367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786515599712472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11911197845734413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744909573663985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11998662562916285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14339088475759015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.381054674973504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983927255974798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14530054445531174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13192529530503064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685692346256014,0.0,0.0,0.08432436664072437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401189793830594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805964956110456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117662192879429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dannyhowyoufeell,2020/02/27,"Don’t feel really depressed, but act like it? I have had periods of depression the past few years, and right now I FEEL happier, but at the same time my tendencies have said otherwise. My room is a complete mess and I haven’t cleaned it in like a month. I have completely neglected all my school and work responsibilities. And I have been recklessly been spending my money, etc. I don’t know why I’ve been acting like this and feel like it’s out of my control. Any advice.??",3.3237903225806456,5.299906043010754,4.550201612903226,83.14530241935486,74.59139784946238,8.951075268817203,26.678763440860216,9.516144504307137,2.429560215053763,374,14,76,10,8,123,59,93,0.149,0.6779999999999999,0.17300000000000001,0.36200000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,1,8,0,0,4,0,12,0,0,1,1,16,17,7,0,0,2,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,6,0,2,4,0,2,2,3,4,0,0,5,4,11,4,5,12,4,13,0,3,0,0,1,5,0,0,10,48,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19570374038597893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361920084493961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4199633209407174,0.0,0.2246223757177352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34498841833790017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22335651607551826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037910254615549,0.14307454678446271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100643997734952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3913716519285709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15985541194280375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191182539093098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829954180825576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171031420820542,0.19050478677059005,0.0,0.0,0.2026862251298366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11678036880070845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18071456962811625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458005948157622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12896877306374174
mentalhealth,Ssxx1992,2020/02/27,"Childhood trauma will eventually kill me There may be triggers in this post, please be cautious. 

I am a victim of childhood physical and mental abuse by my mother, and on occasion sexual abuse from uncles ( I only remember one instance).

I am in my late twenties, and I have been trying to fight my demons forever. I used to have a double life, the one at home where I would be burned, beaten for hours (lost conciousness many times) ,starved , called names, isolated ...and the one outside at school with friends (who knew nothing of my reality) acting as a vigilante, bullying the bullies, being super friendly, making ppl laugh ... just to get back to my stressed, memory-suppressing self on the way back home. I lived like this for 19 years, until I finally moved out ... I used to think once I'm out, I'll be good, I was on survival mode for so long, I did not even realize that the biggest battle was going be the one I'll face alone as an adult.   

I have suppressed many memories, since there are many gaps in my childhood, I remember small instances like looking down on my burned skin as it falls on the floor, begging to go to the bathroom in the middle of a beating session so I can breathe, not being able to take warm showers or sleep on a side because of how painful the bruises on my skin are .. this has started as early as I can remember..I remember praying to get sick so I can get some love and care from my parents, which of course they never did, I would just hope.  These memories sometimes come back to me even clearer, more prominent especially after I see or experience an injustice, I get defensive, irritated and lose control..I cry so I don't become aggressive, but this lasts for weeks before I get back to ""normal"" again, which I am starting to realize my ""normal"" is me repressing my reality, denying it and trying to overcome it without facing it. 

Yes I was hurt, I was severly abused but I need to get my life together, I want all these suppressed memories to come out at once and I want to cry for days about each one of them so I can heal. 

I have been to therapists, and talked about it, but nothing seems to help, is there any kind of therapy that can help me with this? 

Thank you so much for reading this and for your help -if this is in the wrong thread, please let me know where to post.",6.943775167785232,6.406255818791947,7.1431012304250565,77.02324244966445,64.63758389261744,10.58199105145414,35.17980984340045,10.02789654360092,3.34827225950783,1809,74,349,35,24,586,231,447,0.16399999999999998,0.753,0.084,-0.99,2,1,0,0,4,1,71.0,0,2,2,6,23,28,7,2,18,1,39,12,6,5,2,60,70,29,1,9,11,2,3,2,2,4,5,0,3,2,19,18,0,4,9,1,0,7,5,15,0,5,10,5,50,13,67,48,6,59,2,3,2,1,19,26,0,7,25,244,69,4,0.0764175626293879,0.27162694747053145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07914554855298671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05196656305786456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23504155474945665,0.0,0.04658343689670205,0.08439719410118048,0.06502571737817116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803087544030994,0.0,0.07791279806423297,0.0,0.0,0.1316539274635936,0.0,0.0,0.08570879440609931,0.0,0.0,0.1678822085121654,0.049283006028731424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009461588110257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475103963215844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371170459954262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808003865100986,0.0,0.23955013473162665,0.0,0.08685972377140601,0.0640954259268287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366324425217578,0.0,0.15330609204897078,0.07589988227402332,0.0752559060441759,0.0,0.081806581300383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454471084557133,0.0795771320271441,0.04199709392919754,0.06229051285916935,0.08620233916068983,0.0,0.0,0.07814213523682077,0.10795196884190393,0.07466752220106819,0.0,0.06747810783639809,0.06762713820655104,0.06417150635373729,0.08549170572678441,0.0834187967019186,0.0,0.06896983381386436,0.0,0.05100931644721508,0.23242624288641056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770109295278739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08121977543071933,0.056175701250049455,0.05666265440627094,0.05893793529308663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497459727839413,0.14664942467191794,0.0,0.0,0.16276442040170727,0.25891259069869305,0.058118999886904006,0.08131367447643831,0.0,0.08485265989111061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16776707200739513,0.0,0.0,0.1463738024671667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643824230711176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25969860523665805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733865311989893,0.060894903600435785,0.06956767897486127,0.07972018387359069,0.08633009437679258,0.0,0.06321339748433268,0.0,0.076472750479209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557892343248149,0.0,0.10817748829623414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753605980397057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745649681428856,0.061421542195676915,0.0,0.07035502464580783,0.0873901427233259,0.08872668009584445,0.0,0.04896528852697216,0.0,0.0,0.04455969530295597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376501768960276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200047699449194,0.0,0.0,0.0901461166991792,0.060656704270451924,0.06129755930497431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366380340764822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856968792986843,0.08355060850528029,0.0,0.049210404885119234
mentalhealth,Thinilla,2020/02/27,"Picking up where I left off A short while ago I had a head injury. It was self inflicted but accidental. 
It fractured me, I don't know who I am. I'm trapped inside an unfamiliar body and surrounded by people I should know. I know their names and faces but I don't know who they are to me.
It has cost me my independence. I am homeless.
Only a few people know.
I have a full time job but I'm stupid now, nothing makes sense.
Cats don't like me anymore.
I dedicated my entire life to helping people before the injury but I no longer know why. I am aware of these things but powerless to change them, I can't find the links. 
To know you are less than you were is terrible.

Today I realised I haven't had any human contact since, not really. A person hugged me, I was surprised that she was warm, it destroys me to know that I had forgotten that people are warm.
I cried somewhere secret.
I can't tell anyone. 
I have to continue helping people. I have to keep pretending to be me until I know who it is.
How do I fix this? How do I pick up from where I left off?
On the outside I am high functioning but inside I am failing.",0.3550554187192105,2.65241444396552,2.5948768472906423,91.21637931034485,87.75,5.5556650246305415,19.923645320197046,7.021680442328713,0.4683455665024634,869,27,187,13,28,294,123,232,0.205,0.718,0.077,-0.9868,2,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,3,1,5,9,2,0,9,0,31,5,3,6,0,30,44,12,0,1,7,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,14,2,0,1,12,1,1,0,8,4,0,0,7,2,42,5,18,35,3,20,0,1,0,1,18,13,0,0,8,133,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109260393392914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522495474597296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242882241981027,0.08762980144610268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664191539294753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392072625170394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13257669918644688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376630739190089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145443187728307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861908887193724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16800473569807814,0.13241221067007264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436522425569578,0.11139417023454808,0.0,0.0,0.6198755886614109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723308628963176,0.0,0.08852039771271343,0.061227218293176275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365507414827984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025223379955388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531492644082012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4344211280239724,0.1094285157952012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028608116606528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307407814405996,0.0,0.0,0.10366971804432497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953913328379868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326002631620608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307772136979995,0.0,0.11879296826813013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308586453673435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SadFaceMcGillicuddy,2020/02/27,"What qualifications must someone have in order to diagnose a mental health disorder in the USA? I’m wondering who I could see for legal/medical mental health diagnoses (in particular for my own knowledge and possibly for work accommodations). 

Do they need to have a particular title (e.g. psychiatrist) or a particular degree (e.g. PsyD)? Or is any counselor/therapist qualified to give an official diagnosis?

In case helpful, I guess I’d like to be evaluated for the following things:
* Depression
* Seasonal Affective Disorder
* Generalized anxiety
* Social anxiety
* Hypochondria
* Somatic Symptoms Disorder(s)
* Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
* Borderline Personality Disorder",7.949633333333335,12.276680030000005,9.666000000000004,37.63633333333335,78.7,15.866666666666667,45.66666666666666,11.602472056035307,9.917666666666667,553,39,54,33,15,192,74,100,0.191,0.76,0.05,-0.9192,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,1,6,0,7,5,0,1,1,11,14,3,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,12,11,1,7,0,1,1,0,6,4,0,4,2,36,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475310356161996,0.0,0.2131829696947863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112482767614455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000969698040853,0.2828457528847319,0.0,0.0,0.6387634686609487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13366356972580118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15349406264233734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29621482179881115,0.0,0.0,0.09339383146574677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807242049016607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15477063262893576,0.0,0.28083537380780965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331571004715773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166262241666967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708014829779432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11103257109388023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14203527344751196,0.11805874816961782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448232187001797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16177957157641867,0.09256849615934183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511037019839139,0.10143810211196697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BeautifulVariety9,2020/02/27,"What to do No therapist is returning my calls and my mental health is getting worse day by day. I don't know how much longer I can do this. How do I get help fast without fucking up my finances? Or just do it and call it the cost of living? 

Currently battling my suicidal thoughts with a mix of several drugs. I really don't want to die but my brain is fucking stupid and keeps reminding me to buy a gun and shoot myself.",3.7396551724137934,4.529161528735635,4.9845402298850585,85.15198275862069,71.64367816091955,9.018390804597699,29.44252873563219,9.2995712137729,2.37572183908046,331,13,71,7,6,110,61,87,0.222,0.736,0.042,-0.9421,1,0,1,2,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,4,0,3,0,10,5,1,2,0,15,18,8,2,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,3,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,11,0,9,17,1,6,0,0,0,2,3,1,2,1,5,48,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181051551937168,0.3990031719268838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25200378204903895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20277030157969295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22657509259742145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3612454586986788,0.20415265763731072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20767643207375167,0.0,0.0,0.13095696953123512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365990186822822,0.0,0.0,0.1073739951968078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17252131871148085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19689388963836896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14362444902423688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516339901205478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207202039879526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21371053903587847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268475561309377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15510737773467814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523831527232405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18833629028251545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19910567937763424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,penguin571,2020/02/27,"Just had an anxiety attack I have been improving everyday. I was doing fine for last 10 days. But today I fell on my face.
Couldn't find my medication while I was going crazy.
I feel pathetic. Feeling lonely and weak",1.24642857142857,3.911835071428573,3.716190476190477,80.88714285714289,91.14285714285714,7.561904761904763,21.285714285714285,8.344100000000001,2.0382571428571428,171,6,31,5,6,59,36,42,0.33,0.547,0.12300000000000001,-0.8807,0,2,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,7,3,1,0,0,7,10,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,4,2,7,1,2,5,0,8,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880299995140547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4283357885158913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428185440298124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807507010920464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441243704081852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139799634858778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069068398651644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3792953730649529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35688854630375805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MiniMallatt,2020/02/27,"Is this really PTSD? Does it get worse? So I (22m) will try to explain my situation as best I can. On 12-29-18, I was next to a gas can when it exploded and was lit on fire. It took me about a minute to put it out, and I barely managed to call 911. I was burnt over 75% of my body and had most of my remaining skin used for skin grafts. I spent 5 months in the hospital & 2 in rehab, 20 surgeries total.  I'm covered in gruesome scars everywhere except my face.

I've been home for 7 months & Ive completely isolated myself, save for my parents & occasional lunch visit with an Uncle. I have panic attacks that are ""scary"" according to my mom whenever we leave the house, & my anxiety will go insane & I can't stand to have any attention on me.I haven't slept right in weeks, usually waking up at 2 - 3 am drenched in sweat & anxious, unable to fall back asleep until the next midday morning when I pass out from exhaustion. 

I do have flashbacks. Very very short, for like a split second I'm back on fire again feeling the flames eating away at my clothes & I'm back in the exact spot on that exact day, then the next second poof, I'm back, but now extremely anxious & hyper-aware. I often feel this terrible angst rising up inside me until it boils over and I either start to cry & anguish, or cry & scream in anger, with a horribly strong urge to hit/break something and hurt my hands, or I'll smack my head against a wall until things calm down ""up there"".

This, combined with the obvious depression, has just been devastating me. I have nothing but alone time to reevaluate all my poor decisions, trying to figure out what I can change in the future so I can move on & be happy.  All this does is make me want to curl up in a fetal position. I want to know if what I'm experiencing is ACTUALLY PTSD so I can try to figure out what steps I should take from here...

I'd appreciate your advice!",4.739256640959724,4.925784616966581,5.837676735218513,82.07814320908314,69.15424164524421,9.259682947729221,27.77645672664953,9.188382445141503,2.0389407883461867,1492,45,314,27,24,498,225,389,0.179,0.7509999999999999,0.07,-0.993,1,1,1,0,0,0,72.0,1,1,0,2,16,15,2,2,15,0,29,15,10,2,6,43,49,20,0,4,8,2,7,1,0,3,2,1,1,0,15,13,3,0,8,0,2,9,2,9,0,2,9,10,37,6,61,36,6,65,0,2,1,0,7,32,0,5,24,190,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.06418922332344892,0.0,0.0,0.06427688338670089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812551652675752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7839672662095617,0.0,0.04473086629840208,0.0,0.05031950699278371,0.1486194076293575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483125279258693,0.06180000312502808,0.20231494525353988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902929027912129,0.0,0.0,0.07306382814724206,0.0,0.0,0.06716604776385225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958373428614398,0.0,0.06896631958479445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450670163574825,0.042420961166892236,0.0,0.05665395125185939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512443717981555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730666948858284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651802797775458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03436596026985393,0.0,0.03738279445581788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700212320755412,0.0,0.0,0.06750655702782607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598006393589298,0.0,0.0,0.07589825200783118,0.07041603360226457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03614952159481074,0.0,0.0,0.0696487359203825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03213549978945055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043906904357569436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703765919963629,0.10500573624107164,0.06991093314238203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098649334289424,0.0,0.0,0.06311515926532305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717556960967725,0.07303798368244488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15378044799026158,0.06612442334554686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04213866669646565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056173513443646766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393651834998058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0506386319944574,0.0,0.0,0.0465575600996331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04945639514610066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043699560959023366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03835531263968035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308107685681434,0.13397554676330986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05681052719602879,0.07244447863452097,0.1085464358338978,0.07759439255009362,0.0,0.052762637518207464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703275819362671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snakesnack148,2020/02/27,I’m going to kill myself When I get discharged who wants to join? Me and my friend are doing it we are going to meet up and overdose.,0.2943678160919525,2.224805103448276,2.421379310344829,94.91988505747128,84.17241379310346,3.8666666666666663,16.563218390804597,3.1291,-0.957698850574713,104,2,23,0,3,35,23,29,0.138,0.7040000000000001,0.158,-0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,8,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,4,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,17,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39983524773110657,0.0,0.2703832320254206,0.0,0.5882379370596283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5725600328638559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052471468860356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaythrowltaway,2020/02/27,"Anxiety about going insane, want some advice. I’m 16 and I don’t know the timeline exactly but around 7 months ago I smoked weed for the first time and I was tripped TF out. Never done any drugs or alcohol before this. It was fun but so wild. The second time I ate an edible and it was super fun but the morning after I was experiencing derealization for about 2 days, worst experience of my life. Scared me to death. Anyways my mom had gone insane in between these weed experiences by smoking weed everyday,not eating,sleeping, and letting go of her ego. Once we realized she was experiencing psychosis we called 911 and the police came followed by an ambulance. The officer approached her and she got scared so pushed him away slightly and he tackled her and took her into custody. After being in jail for about 2 weeks we bailed her out and she had recovered. She’s never had any mental health issues before this besides depression as far as I’m aware. Neither have I. I was extremely happy she was ok! But during this whole ordeal and ever since I have felt anxiety about going insane for no good reason. Haven’t smoked weed since and probably wont for a long long time. I’m doing well otherwise so it’s not effecting my day to day life but it’s always there and it’s horrible. Just looking for some advice. Sorry if this is long and written bad I’m just venting. Feel free to ask anything as I probably left out a lot.",2.370846628624665,5.022968227436827,3.9547665075113545,82.6239676254804,81.52707581227438,6.751088855246303,23.73692791428904,7.941651935203635,1.6319370909514386,1137,41,207,22,31,377,160,277,0.16,0.7290000000000001,0.111,-0.9382,1,0,4,0,0,0,24.0,3,0,0,3,15,13,0,2,10,1,20,6,0,2,4,46,40,26,1,2,10,1,2,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,10,22,2,0,6,0,1,10,8,5,1,2,18,5,27,9,31,19,6,38,0,1,1,0,18,10,0,5,18,139,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21528136380128102,0.09764439207075253,0.1177205441838411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165649923151158,0.0,0.0,0.14981625420135386,0.0,0.168534183993369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064690823948696,0.09805992933314407,0.10297861132091096,0.0,0.1034927975244067,0.0,0.09197353427592296,0.0,0.0,0.1874649549847256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124789940168119,0.12598620794008927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21311959819584084,0.0,0.0948750098605052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272522949616773,0.0,0.0,0.12774303703677828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964010695428796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21550243264841226,0.0,0.0,0.055696896869869256,0.0,0.10576459170186073,0.0,0.0,0.09369647302358217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780824183869568,0.09239149232464562,0.08809978111739561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172604017340037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708797224768365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497158883371465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060537458411564035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11968205176570253,0.11263937143043745,0.1556092865670834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924470255185395,0.09250115980991684,0.0,0.0,0.09364852878843127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100877483068827,0.0,0.0,0.12901039582752585,0.0879234372991267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16991427133905307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173098351467167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375281116496549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325609834316112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220565650873476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822401534598076,0.0,0.110233007063722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12330777509813748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926940972950939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238454219341036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497136206425169,0.0,0.08835845769260271,0.0,0.0990411854425827,0.0,0.0,0.1229823993210228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Whatthedarknessdoes,2020/02/27,"What do I do when I have too many problems for a therapist to even help? I have treatment resistant depression, general, social anxiety & panic, OCD, CPTSD, cluster b personality traits (related to CPTSD), substance use disorder, anorexia, dissociative disorder (also related to CPTSD), sleep disturbances/ treatment resistant insomnia. I was working with a therapist for 2 years but she left my clinic (Kaiser). Then I worked with the facilitator of my ED group and she also left. Now I've seen three therapists since August of last year and I just have too many problems. They couldn't help. The last one flat out said it when I did my intake with her. Multiple times. Yet didn't transfer me to someone who could help. There isn't anyone that can help. I've been on 27 meds that I can recall. Did 200 sessions TMS. The meds I'm on now (lamictal, geodon, lunesta, gabapentin) help me sleep for longer but I have nightmares. My psychiatrist refuses to adjust my meds. And now she wont even respond to my messages or make an appointment with me. I am out of hope that I can get better. I've tried so many things, been to almost all the groups at Kaiser. I try so hard at everything, but I can't get help, I can't get better. I am a lost cause. It's over for me.",2.938966113416317,5.406489651452283,4.043262448132783,83.95972078146612,77.79668049792531,7.8340940525587826,26.22423928077455,8.72156446121922,2.1715185338865832,990,39,190,23,24,321,135,241,0.083,0.789,0.128,0.9428,0,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,1,5,16,9,0,2,8,0,23,4,2,3,1,27,33,14,0,5,5,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,8,9,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,9,3,30,3,25,21,1,22,0,2,1,0,20,9,0,3,13,121,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921414766744974,0.0,0.0,0.15846822444008465,0.0,0.10735296520234024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579580637651724,0.0,0.0,0.06927892782157337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17525613361496534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178228843769488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910719000869558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533732097507235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271081609395644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308825996996841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904657145175066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529538102969598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875607534092526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3984667692737531,0.0,0.0,0.09840863709852343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16152658715616655,0.0,0.0,0.21530107204208293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815734946988424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613656254135905,0.3013542195731472,0.0,0.0,0.33016609873600405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713906376380895,0.0,0.0,0.1162488442498336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651269456613396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18961205163551875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424761685771384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195986747833803,0.0,0.1983027884724411,0.10099941942150913,0.08395002687250028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3451179923172455,0.06582424310444762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05777425146007317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453741512367035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557316986662024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426260705323252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276083369491213
mentalhealth,ADumbBitchLoser,2020/02/27,"I sure as hell feel like there’s no light at the end of the tunnel. I have overwhelming sadness. I can’t find the motivation to leave my bed, to go to class, to do art or to even socialize. 

I feel broken. 

I feel like reaching out to people is pointless because the conversation has to end sometime, and I’m left with the same feelings again. 

I thought briefly about Suicide, I don’t think I could do it but this is the closest I’ve come to feeling like I have reason enough to. 

I feel like I’m spiraling down. Things don’t feel like they will get better, I have so many people saying it will. That time heals all. 

I’ve heard all this before, I’ve pulled myself out of these feelings before, but they’ve never felt this real. 

I’ve never felt sadness like this. 

I found a therapist I’ll be seeing soon. 

It doesn’t feel like anything can help. 

Sorry for the rant",1.8639137700534758,3.9587151306818233,2.9965106951871685,92.01881016042783,79.51136363636363,5.504812834224597,21.716577540106954,6.522977012572876,0.3326594919786099,677,20,143,6,17,217,101,176,0.113,0.7020000000000001,0.185,0.9186,0,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,1,2,6,13,1,1,8,0,17,1,0,2,5,33,38,6,1,1,3,0,11,7,0,2,1,2,1,0,10,5,0,0,17,1,0,3,7,4,0,0,5,15,15,9,19,29,4,16,1,3,1,0,6,6,1,1,14,85,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768658648242875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495560609786552,0.0,0.1813427761293691,0.0,0.0,0.09424020626343936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178864016115112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507637079018568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18875414413941133,0.1101009297030462,0.0,0.07037929536373237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48490166660198397,0.4567421705674399,0.20462112160608786,0.0,0.09739033980951084,0.0,0.0,0.1168332575307474,0.0,0.0,0.0556711613572812,0.0,0.060558284005278004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142230393675306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282751843124217,0.11577350829022805,0.0,0.0,0.3644054774023887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080311550305938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436525787517653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14774515831760668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128416346819125,0.0,0.10955741188428048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473768307560416,0.0,0.0,0.08491141133292883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862051926447233,0.0,0.0,0.10538670194445374,0.1192808237489193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11655507246498426,0.0,0.10042785788532188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371983835063532,0.07079113431689002,0.06827684271298394,0.0,0.08459363648268188,0.06213371551691223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rekkotwelve,2020/02/27,"It's the first time here,and I have so much to say... I'm a 14yr old boy living in italy. Almost every i feel very sad,so much than i think about suicide... I've discovered this problem only in Middle school and then getting worse on high school... the strange part is now,that I have really good friend and a family who support me every time. Idk if this is releated to my school grades,because sometimes I've achive bad grades,but most of time i've good grades....or it can be releated about my past bullying in middle school,for 3 years.... pls,someone help me,i can't help me either",4.055903361344537,4.74132890756303,4.6885609243697495,87.94191701680674,70.84873949579833,7.966806722689077,24.959033613445378,8.07648339933343,1.2026882352941168,456,12,98,6,8,146,80,119,0.14,0.71,0.15,0.2822,0,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,9,12,5,1,2,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,8,4,10,11,5,15,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,3,8,45,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14421445746075173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202500431558271,0.08779278717893935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426848291656567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576851468525078,0.0,0.07282045106752769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250268529241508,0.0,0.0,0.11126890150201604,0.0,0.0752441046224767,0.0,0.0,0.24159299795829034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19306611102671026,0.15216422596838045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12717162054090134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21174141338731606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112395749632251,0.0,0.0,0.1095331158033339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595879384403696,0.1374826532005945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378069549430181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226240793689927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452987391241333,0.0,0.5830206070125146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202702803851398,0.0,0.1424387031561202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15753366470212127,0.1634313179358812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922817087184086,0.0,0.0,0.2519363173115993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883094943584815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676790146553553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927436636469941
mentalhealth,CrashGaming123,2020/02/27,"Uncontrollable Urges to do bad things Hello, I’m sorry if this is the wrong place to post but I need help with this problem. I am 15 years old and I always have urges to do any awful thing my brain comes up with. Apparently, this part is slightly normal. I’ve seen articles like [this](https://www.google.com/amp/s/thetab.com/2014/07/18/ever-had-the-sudden-urge-to-do-something-totally-horrible-dont-worry-thats-perfectly-normal-17732/amp), and other reddit posts about wanting to open the car door while driving down the freeway. The only difference is they all say they would never be able to do it. My problem is with all of these urges, I know I would do it, and I have gone through with some of them. It is so hard for me to control and I can’t deal with it anymore. Some of the urges are like other people had, opening a car door going fast down the road. Some of them are really dark that I don’t want to get into and I’ve come really close to going through with it, even though I don’t want to. One of the lighter ones but still a large impact on my life is breaking my monitor. I know it sounds stupid, but when I’ve broken 6 monitors and have to find a new excuse for my parents and have them tell me to control me anger is really upsetting, because I’m not angry when these happen. (I’m also starting online classes soon so I obviously am going to need to use my computer) My computer is also the way I keep up with my friends. I don’t have many friends in my school and these are the only people I really talk to so it really does effect me. I’ve tried to tell my mom but she doesn’t understand, and I don’t blame her because I barely understand it either. So I guess I’m asking if this is some sort of condition or illness that maybe I can tell someone about and get the help I need, or if there’s nothing I can do about and just try my best to control it.",4.201363913131722,5.068301002638524,5.1018601583113465,84.44786634869092,70.63588390501319,8.152668966916991,26.45027400040593,8.384062270229773,1.6198077126040191,1476,45,302,22,26,482,182,379,0.121,0.7809999999999999,0.098,-0.8669,2,0,1,0,0,0,61.0,0,0,5,5,17,13,2,2,13,1,36,3,1,5,4,68,65,30,0,14,12,2,1,2,2,2,2,2,2,0,22,24,0,4,6,0,0,9,8,8,0,2,3,4,42,5,43,59,9,36,0,0,1,0,22,12,0,11,13,204,64,4,0.09011380456677584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14412795390965955,0.07498190426593036,0.1952765391979035,0.0,0.061280477239436776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936867982862426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424424280049668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524126275712646,0.10986507771562426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456887831289956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059680832101124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525012682543055,0.0,0.0,0.3032108830619112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290337562446567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414974602667206,0.0,0.0,0.07885919764259829,0.0,0.10561270781966496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951931803282346,0.08151309534332372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823623848248147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392434037426675,0.0,0.09416148715203417,0.0,0.15364125542621965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992705152504624,0.0,0.07968733977299007,0.0,0.0807242687367635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080276736726747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009728997816483,0.0,0.0,0.09904838062063034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365004514732406,0.08805010617447838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136125390980576,0.09053142880589243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554019878956478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200454732775178,0.06950132142173285,0.08703247398525077,0.0,0.0,0.17658479100620209,0.08646662586457046,0.0,0.09455927911928244,0.0,0.12212689227608008,0.13707121811317274,0.0,0.0,0.10006071572162477,0.09758446881966934,0.0,0.12494713140090655,0.0,0.09414974602667206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17260823003728618,0.0,0.0,0.17245348167053293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886460535065943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166211429477454,0.0,0.0911999811679948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635313417908034,0.0,0.0,0.10087502648666168,0.06378301468557063,0.0,0.07196500073177396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724300626605256,0.23629031135423306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197352151804167,0.0,0.08853635545408102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236271615071008,0.0,0.0,0.18762329717604254,0.0,0.07782939403793777,0.0,0.0,0.15945437010496036,0.0715281436127637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128028522545752,0.09852529899173433,0.0,0.058030335643866185
mentalhealth,denimrenim,2020/02/27,"Ignorance can be unexpected, so be prepared. Sometimes, ignorance by people can affect you to a great extent. It can deteriorate your mental health, make you question your worth, and thus, you enter the OVERTHINKING phase.
So yeah, how to deal with ignorance?",6.618720930232557,9.752220116279073,6.7141279069767466,66.07258720930236,68.76744186046511,9.881395348837213,31.68023255813953,10.125756701596842,4.131702325581395,207,9,29,6,4,66,33,43,0.141,0.6579999999999999,0.201,0.489,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,5,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,1,5,1,0,4,0,10,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,4,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,1,0,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3743829781368372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4003648254552599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3860024715167649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24239979512812235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659612564990973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517566172870436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4068016291779694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3591562646207108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lindsb1020,2020/02/27,Back on medication after a long while... I have been notorious for taking my medication and then just stopping which I know is a terrible thing to do.  My depression has finally subsided and I was feeling really good for awhile but then my anxiety and OCD really ramped up again.  It took me a few months to finally accept that I need medicinal help again- but I am so glad that I am back on my meds and serious about it!,4.4730894308943085,5.840499073170732,6.432682926829269,73.28528455284554,70.46341463414635,11.808130081300812,29.52032520325203,11.538034831475384,3.9817739837398367,332,13,64,13,6,116,57,82,0.125,0.696,0.17800000000000002,0.8289,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,3,0,8,2,0,0,0,12,13,10,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,1,11,3,9,10,1,17,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,13,53,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16292185530188966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32752234874572544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18343118603009045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107684287633352,0.0,0.0,0.4665975620723966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17862955736307842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274964194312556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704302125509512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18847219733524667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365622230542562,0.42909076131945867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999102721922207,0.0,0.0,0.15791493276234886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728687210357877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17805288044746434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16012731712378692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14148814193157996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23661807001963844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,callum-lumsden,2020/02/27,"Mental health documentary I am doing a documentary based on mental health and social media. Please can you answer this it would make my job a whole lot easier. 


https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfjREoDTYgMx0BGK_YuLBQTn8dgFW3aXE0j7LUurHCawL4F6w/viewform?usp=sf_link",20.0,27.29303333333333,12.508333333333335,18.742500000000007,49.0,8.333333333333334,17.5,8.841846274778883,2.076,240,3,20,4,4,64,26,30,0.0,0.831,0.16899999999999998,0.6249,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,1,0,5,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,15,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5539122711761011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258559097184222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215132275233618,0.0,0.0,0.17392145252910413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5251531938470255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286009447708194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656014321790621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908986244056403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18508969675112336,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mashash12,2020/02/27,"Could you please answer this questionaire on how mental health is impacted by social media 👍🏻 Could yous please answer this questionaire for my college course please 


https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1Gq4WF3dm5GLPNY_reEGM5fEFnaskwAuX9U2xA_EnHdA/edit",28.801034482758627,27.784711172413807,18.09931034482759,16.951724137931052,23.48275862068965,17.117241379310347,46.24137931034482,14.554592549557764,6.736558620689657,220,5,19,4,1,55,23,29,0.0,0.784,0.21600000000000005,0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,5,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,11,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39217674016936205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26105699473442523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24750293809126314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8087717579444952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503541275032753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rattus-domestica,2020/02/27,"What stupid thing are you hating yourself for lately? I’ll tell you mine. I’m an artist who is stuck in a creative block. I recently discovered a new-ish band and fell in love with them and their music. Because they’re close to me in age, they are going through similar creative/growing pains (based on their lyrics and interviews), and they are still a relatively “small” band, I thought I could reach out to them on twitter just to tell them their music has really helped me this year. So I did. Not once, but twice, because I’m a fucking idiot. They never acknowledged me. I’m honestly devastated and mortified that I even tried to talk to them. I’m too old to be doing this kind of shit. My self-esteem has tanked the last few weeks since and now it hurts to listen to their music. I feel like I just went through an intensely painful relationship in the span of 8 weeks and it’s all me, guys. I’m fucking crazy.",2.655463113422165,4.842228104972373,3.4264413389665265,89.46027949301269,77.34254143646409,6.910757231069224,23.906727331816697,7.928766900206844,1.2159617159571008,721,24,149,12,17,228,114,181,0.195,0.7390000000000001,0.067,-0.9789,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,11,0,7,13,6,0,8,0,10,6,1,0,2,21,25,9,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,8,10,0,1,3,3,0,3,2,9,0,1,4,2,26,4,21,19,2,24,0,1,0,3,25,10,3,0,12,93,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19759826952336734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294033314086916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704870456596703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194975680363381,0.11578608317309212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996705996722494,0.0,0.0,0.09211069562432088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604792751093931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600150530432102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863514722663906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735041462958561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16877569185228405,0.0,0.13211238123100275,0.18282713966328906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918143314138569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14627859942101726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500187619280853,0.15653259988890292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17006996499571106,0.17260409468428567,0.0,0.0,0.3449174735810044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038290999534624,0.0,0.16002905462060074,0.17400740037457332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690790915066789,0.0,0.16636718539294382,0.13406973364046945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294329363481086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13026937531719018,0.28332058193285875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767512212524326,0.0,0.0,0.12866908020596554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003797324998743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600128382868723,0.0,0.0,0.15024472157372626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437068940840903
mentalhealth,blahblah90FU,2020/02/27,"We broke up 3 years ago And I finally realized today, after a dream I had about him, that I've been *obsessing* since. 

​

Not healthy. Maybe now that I realize it I can learn how to be less miserable.",2.305243902439024,4.545214097560977,3.9489634146341466,85.00685975609757,78.75609756097559,8.978048780487804,27.32317073170732,9.516144504307137,2.78099512195122,162,7,33,5,4,54,36,41,0.19899999999999998,0.7509999999999999,0.05,-0.7154,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,7,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,6,0,4,1,1,7,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,6,23,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935377909575801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3587926928099888,0.4023743070526847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3627503542967857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326770871567215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27392444632970125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31388431139357786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4023743070526847,0.2132448728951436
mentalhealth,Ocelot859,2020/02/27,"Antidepressant Side Effects I'm having... (puffy face/hair loss/thinning) Hey friends, 

Has anyone had the side effects of a puffy face (cheeks) that seems like fluid retention? And also hair loss and very thin, dry hair from antidepressants? I struggle daily with the depression and self-esteem issues they seem to cause. Has anyone experienced a puffy face that looks like water retention and the hair issue? My new psychiatrist gave me a blood test because he noticed it too and suspected a drug allergy (I'm a young male, and very skinny, but my face looks like it got stung by bees). We also tried limiting salt (helped a little bit), and also food allergy tests (no food allergies). Google shows that it's rare, but these side effects are possible. We are debating if we should taper off my antidepressant meds to see if it is indeed the antidepressants causing this. As it is causing me anxiety and depression that is negating them anyways. Any related experiences would be great. Feeling kind of hopeless, and tired of having anxiety of going out because of how ballooned up my face looks. 

Love you guys! ONE DAY AT A TIME....",5.844331683168317,8.023896836633664,5.923849009900994,75.07805074257426,68.25742574257426,9.208415841584161,30.94183168316832,9.673873057562805,3.227385148514852,899,37,148,21,16,284,126,202,0.114,0.7859999999999999,0.1,-0.23399999999999999,0,0,1,0,0,1,39.0,3,1,2,5,6,12,0,1,11,0,13,16,10,7,0,32,26,18,0,4,4,0,5,3,1,2,2,0,0,2,11,14,4,1,7,1,0,1,2,5,0,1,3,11,13,7,15,20,1,14,0,4,4,1,14,9,0,4,7,85,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844914497181753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064025211096629,0.0,0.1814307687639202,0.0,0.0,0.16583145868743435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445737364375048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12946151505658068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3654510662384729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647598373049849,0.0,0.20427008417655165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375181987692924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599656253545187,0.0,0.0,0.05995893875905167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867811643309438,0.0,0.09161664275822287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06739323914317474,0.0,0.09484135881116602,0.13073776389483258,0.0,0.11741544336046696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948343465192304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24753890580359536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348555708391015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17380044379952705,0.11885094411325657,0.0,0.0,0.2987386203476873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702544981873227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171856504367302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452783921035012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13500710576088815,0.0,0.0,0.08035465637932453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368409354659813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944950000473231,0.21590633827605327,0.1237075409189686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396830783505305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06914648288779612,0.13629328447850014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805098191453523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19568617099877256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423769527075294,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,india2424,2020/02/27,"Dreaming of abuse Ok so I really need some help here. I do have really severe diagnoses PTSD, but I haven’t been dreaming of my abuse lately until about 4 or 5 nights ago. Last night I dreamt that my father showed up at my college and stole a school van. In the dream I chased after him screaming “why do you hurt me I’m your daughter!!!”... in return he tried to run me over with said van. I’m at a loss. At this point I’m scared to even sleep because every night it’s just night terrors. SOS and some kind words needed.😞",0.5689143730886848,2.7350899816513774,2.0258944954128424,96.7163340978593,84.96330275229356,4.734250764525996,16.422782874617738,5.985473137389443,-0.6017712538226299,404,8,91,3,12,130,81,109,0.25,0.6629999999999999,0.086,-0.9727,1,0,0,0,2,0,14.0,0,2,0,1,5,7,0,2,3,1,5,2,1,0,0,10,10,6,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,5,0,0,2,2,13,2,15,8,2,19,0,2,0,0,8,8,0,3,10,49,16,2,0.0,0.3814522361153496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14269242965522255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981273563005732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338372302058565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063208336773134,0.0,0.13562629383063307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789648942156356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172324415838944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16762811222196775,0.0,0.13121409145983134,0.18158401810328254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935908658242506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.604247235326041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521710657305686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881682658885284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20624624112502915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15312173229145198,0.0,0.16116157801882092,0.16291278780763466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181853132673716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16108877604283067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928977701818944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14525266488491853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway125495,2020/02/27,"I've come to a realization and need to tell someone Throwaway for reasons

It's tough to talk about this, so I'm sorry if it kind of rambles. I got out of an abusive relationship a few months ago. It was toxic and included emotional abuse. I looked at it as if I was the victim and realized it was me who was the bad guy. I was the abuser. I looked at myself and realized that I could never look at myself realistically. It was always through some type of lens that allowed me to wallow in my own misery. I have always just hated myself more than anything. I've always wanted to see myself fail. I'm my own worst enemy. I started to date my ex three years ago and she was the best thing that happened to me. She was my best friend and I wanted the best for her, but I was always at battle with myself. I was doing any and everything to keep myself down and in that process I did the most selfish thing anyone could do. I took her down to take myself down. I loved her, but was never really there for her. I never boosted her confidence and in all honesty, I wanted her to fail at whatever she was doing so I wouldn't be alone. I never supported her. I always complained about how she was never into my interests, too oblivious to notice that she was indeed trying, when I just didn't care enough to give her interests any attention. All she wanted to do was help me, but I resisted change. I tried therapists and never opened up to them. I either left them or the therapists got tired of my shit and discharged me. A few of them suggested inpatient, but my family and I did not want that. I reflect on this and wonder if inpatient would've helped me. In all honesty, I feel like I built a wall. I never let anyone in and I don't let myself out. I feel like I'm too far gone to fix anything. My parents resist to really see that there is anything wrong with me. Maybe I'm a narcissist. Maybe I do have a personality disorder like a therapist has hinted at before. I just don't know anymore.",2.7593766461808613,4.51412147263682,4.637096868598189,82.87590869183497,75.56716417910448,7.614983904009366,23.515071700321922,8.405096225971981,1.508809540532631,1560,47,308,29,34,532,177,402,0.17800000000000002,0.726,0.096,-0.9838,2,1,0,0,2,0,39.0,0,0,3,5,13,25,4,0,15,0,35,3,1,3,10,67,68,27,0,12,13,2,2,3,1,1,1,0,0,2,18,21,0,1,9,0,0,3,12,12,0,1,22,7,72,13,50,40,16,40,0,2,5,1,32,23,1,7,17,248,90,3,0.0,0.2673082383694574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332507852354378,0.0,0.0,0.07788718076573922,0.0,0.0,0.3128728055467792,0.0,0.0,0.10228065038812197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458074013918642,0.10516676848940053,0.0,0.18565591790753816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279100324850212,0.0,0.0,0.06399184662248908,0.0,0.23676136714452165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667403028650115,0.0,0.07955434566975188,0.06478035362918383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008626286651106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618865842258012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459276725608356,0.0,0.07770435588263536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675872192245804,0.0,0.07089428845857992,0.0,0.0760493561505545,0.10744945952198062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05810131765704728,0.0,0.0,0.07214115596679302,0.0,0.0,0.12029272737826842,0.0,0.0,0.07446236586656893,0.06650138271471785,0.0,0.0,0.07424696687930478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008133925485946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684349798128299,0.0,0.0783119023158678,0.04132936477544572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08170781040840036,0.15379944226519415,0.0,0.11022052860833284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18945365115653265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787325392087043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110217537394854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060025972477108384,0.0,0.0,0.05576175144522756,0.4060059969059616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856186223552479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835035523819529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566398186951762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635338174429156,0.07732076509796319,0.0,0.08073941449043613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198534207205371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719435558564278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637188920093963,0.0,0.0,0.08418311819490013,0.053228764850063504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533898322282328,0.0,0.0,0.056542972224705564,0.060444975710824536,0.06573035930973906,0.0,0.0,0.2619479338149649,0.09992248946727778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643428942168818,0.0,0.0,0.08355282035132773,0.10211521478734167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217821158311194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155397730543444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05342174679484515,0.08222220284924288,0.0,0.048427988319222494
mentalhealth,HyperBui,2020/02/27,Have you been institutionalized? If so what was your experience like there?,5.904999999999998,9.647212833333338,6.416666666666668,59.74500000000001,87.33333333333334,9.066666666666668,22.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.789866666666668,62,2,10,2,2,20,12,12,0.0,0.794,0.20600000000000002,0.4329,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8946270104294881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44681373323790796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ease330,2020/02/27,"I don’t recognize my sister or even my past self, they look like different people. What is happening? 
There was a vid that my sister was in. I just realize that I don’t recognize this person. I feel like she never existed before. I haven’t seen her in a few weeks but something feels odd about it. I also saw a pic of my old self (prob 7 or 8 yrs old) and I honestly don’t recognize this person as someone who was me in the past. I’m having a hard time knowing who I was before. I don’t know what the fuck is going on. It’s giving me a panic attack 

Why am I feeling this way",0.5459333333333305,2.291086680000003,3.482099999999998,88.65088333333334,82.2,6.7266666666666675,20.016666666666666,7.793537801064563,0.7603466666666665,445,12,99,8,12,159,77,125,0.14800000000000002,0.7509999999999999,0.102,-0.8201,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,5,6,2,1,7,0,13,1,0,0,1,12,26,6,0,0,4,2,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,11,1,0,0,6,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,6,7,19,3,7,20,1,13,0,0,3,1,12,4,1,2,9,67,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13083077018635236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18611848902458386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784229075472155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709270610091334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805618213496136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24816305483544784,0.11687579165738972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15124545892436864,0.0,0.15693991858513426,0.09297758570096616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446708394006156,0.0,0.14655336407787628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17982043830901226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15985328166134538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738270103798933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261783181390897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3433411209929862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19194921733005726,0.0,0.0,0.31234920689613843,0.11341956220375092,0.2856982212295411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413407230126896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386176529925954,0.12594718545209246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539640949683538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129857975014668,0.1312299608167646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762345129863613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fixInfo,2020/02/27,"Would you like to try out one of the most effective meditation in a short time a day?  Then this article will be more useful for you. So let's see what this is. In fact, this is a very simple meditation exercise. This method, called the [Transcendental Meditation](https://fixinfos.com/meditations/transcendental-meditation/), is not a Buddhist meditation. This has Hindu history. On the one hand, this is a form of mantra meditation.

***The specialty of this is the use of meditation phrases.***

These are just a few words that are easy to use and easy to remember. In this method, we use our chosen phrases to improve our minds. This is just a brief explanation of TM.

So I think if you learn more about it and get used to it, you will get more benefits. So guys deep digging on these subjects and training your mind as a wonderful weapon.

Your comments are highly welcome..",3.3630769230769246,6.48837094871795,4.471230769230772,76.89876923076923,83.1025641025641,7.991794871794872,25.748717948717946,8.697196308434329,2.5355702564102556,692,28,123,19,20,225,92,156,0.013999999999999999,0.8170000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.9761,0,0,2,0,0,0,39.0,3,6,0,1,6,4,1,0,13,0,15,2,1,6,1,25,25,9,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,15,5,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,1,0,2,0,2,10,3,19,20,6,13,1,0,1,0,13,9,0,3,4,91,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702182030960336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750699235456808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17418657787848715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16505810786488673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17612652798478198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704609075707949,0.0,0.08144065657972413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33663671351878266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22591896194415065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18883734453611786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328374314664897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10681391667219932,0.0,0.0,0.09720346237532622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317760281225782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.719871585287077,0.0,0.13754404103905613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18077783355705224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184181074852614,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mike-earley,2020/02/27,"Any advice for my possibly depressed 15 year old? I'm the father of five kids, so I've dealt with my fair share of teenage moodiness and hormones. However my youngest daughter has been in a sort of rut for a few months now and I'm not sure how to help her. She's lonely, doesn't really have any friends and lashes out when I ask her to tell me about school. She hardly leaves her room most of the day except to go to the kitchen. She hardly talks to me or my wife anymore and when I try to talk to her alone in her room to ask if she's okay she just gets angry with me, telling me to get out. She refuses to make an appointment with the school counselor or therapist so I don't know what to do at this point. I tell her I love her and that I'm proud of her, I offer to play a game or help her with homework but she just continues to tell me to go away. On the other hand, she's sensitive and tears up easily, almost never seems happy which hurts me. 

How can I help her when she never talks to me and refuses professional help?",3.1642813455657475,3.7947524311926633,4.313779816513762,90.02036391437309,72.8532110091743,8.015168195718656,24.16636085626911,8.238735603445708,1.0795146177370034,802,21,186,12,15,263,119,218,0.091,0.7709999999999999,0.138,0.8738,1,3,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,11,12,0,0,9,1,7,3,1,3,3,35,20,19,0,1,9,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,5,13,1,2,2,2,0,2,5,4,0,1,1,3,37,8,36,19,2,24,0,3,0,1,43,11,0,8,11,122,42,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359637428901955,0.0,0.0,0.1266530712430806,0.13099681247171438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202367638233296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543577946927298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23648648008996015,0.0,0.11883364461451053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157018072173654,0.0,0.10893843314944336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977193851241265,0.0,0.13216285123099994,0.0,0.14376483774839413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346420353911794,0.2266053742877331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33911185251513665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540118914437574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951099004787244,0.0,0.0,0.13392577206619466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415459936159793,0.0,0.08442746285942583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095642161790637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951008439063286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327211826909039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195660124711682,0.1425890212624855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102736390816054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560123020129109,0.0,0.1151441156625659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920742910287654,0.0,0.0,0.3049834030530684,0.4422020397987669,0.0,0.0,0.14685490828295628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587271686106764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145001580319243
mentalhealth,cliu9,2020/02/27,"First time being laid off I just got notice yesterday that my whole team is being eliminated and I’m still just....processing the reality of the situation I guess. I always knew the tech industry was brutal, but never thought I’d succumb to it so quickly. At this point I’m grateful I don’t have any dependents or family that rely on my income and I know the situation could be a lot worse, but it’s just hard to get myself out of this dark headspace. Any tips on how to push past this feeling?

My manager just went on maternity leave a month ago, so I’m glad she’s safe from this lay-off, but I’m speculating that the situation left me exposed to the chopping block w/ no one to advocate/pull for me in any important executive meetings leading up to this. I know I can’t blame her, though and there’s a good chance she wouldn’t have been able to save our team anyway. Ironically, I’ve been actively helping a couple friends look for jobs lately, so I know the job market is real tough right now especially for early-in-career people with “entry level jobs” all needing 4+ years of experience in a specific industry/role. It’s taking all my willpower to not just stay in my blanket burrito all day and sulk, but I’ve only got a month to find another position internally before I’m officially out. 

I’m still letting the information sink in and not quite ready to tell family/friends yet, so I’m temporarily using this as an outlet for how I’m feeling. Onwards and upwards, they say. Thanks for reading.",3.3409901247401272,5.417682719594598,5.274324324324322,77.52556133056136,74.8445945945946,8.607900207900206,27.938669438669443,9.265573868473778,2.65107525987526,1199,49,225,30,26,412,177,296,0.085,0.773,0.142,0.9648,5,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,0,1,5,19,8,1,0,15,0,15,0,0,5,4,47,40,19,0,3,11,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,12,9,0,2,9,3,0,3,7,2,0,2,8,5,21,6,33,26,5,36,0,0,1,0,13,16,0,4,16,136,33,9,0.11340030709088846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052253005307046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435813980881537,0.0,0.0,0.23134829245209054,0.11891010953971724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649530900707028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905409177451045,0.12547528288775536,0.0,0.07313381670028561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109272601477873,0.10690371715641164,0.0,0.11467720512627795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036458262612903,0.09645824328093598,0.0,0.0,0.17522559191359216,0.0,0.05924698002991809,0.0,0.0,0.09511479734670893,0.18139316979157014,0.0,0.12492322312428066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015844010631357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600983546714005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3375969204998147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869655293087448,0.0,0.12792048576822615,0.12007455149750948,0.12320976545907075,0.1159594971063027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522769735919537,0.0,0.0,0.09640888585531614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18103008643582014,0.0,0.0,0.08408489081782006,0.08746130773567269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12910700123515118,0.0,0.0,0.07684298290780091,0.0862460435561659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825342463046066,0.07861749450656529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719994441939887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061518531086925,0.11343099482448968,0.1290743759561508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684324264686757,0.0,0.0901804757537221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3824000893703172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208696389679192,0.18112326345586371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852629180900004,0.0,0.09911686671829817,0.10440376695753738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114152259519905,0.09002717689294436,0.06612463100580968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979414555520157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512322078231433,0.0,0.12660739310854058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556460098488645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730260797914195
mentalhealth,Benmben1,2020/02/27,"On a slippery, red-faced, non eye contact, embarrassing slope.. help pls As the title says, it keeps getting worse. I used to be a confident guy, popular, with a witty sense of humour & a flirty personality... where did that go!?

I’ve been on a downward slope over the past few years, the decline was so gradual it was hard to tell it was even happening, these days I feel anxious to look at people, paranoid that they think I’m weird and are talking about me. 

My face turns beetroot red whenever the attention is on me at all, yesterday I was asked a simple question from a new guy, him and the other new guy were looking at me & I can feel myself getting redder and redder. I’m stuck in a cycle of not wanting to do something that would cause any sort of attention being drawn to me because I know I’ll go red, which then in turn causes me to go red even more when I receive the unwanted attention.

I got home from work last night and have had the anxious heavy feeling on my chest ever since, dreading going in for today.

The only thing I can think of to get through this is to power through it, but each time I’ve tried I get so nervous my hands are pissing with sweat & I can feel my voice is going to crack with nerves.

I’m posting this because I really just feel I need a couple of days off as I’m really struggling and feel exhausted trying to get this out of my mind. I know these are definitely ‘first world problems’ but I’m struggling to go about my day anymore.

It seems pathetic to think that I can’t even seem to overcome these things as I’m normally a strong willed person, I just feel a bit trapped.",8.619421560035057,5.906890030674847,8.549097283085015,75.24417177914113,62.80368098159509,11.522874671340931,37.70289219982472,9.606745405546679,3.368770201577563,1274,47,258,18,14,416,179,326,0.141,0.799,0.06,-0.9768,1,1,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,1,4,12,12,1,5,19,0,24,7,6,3,2,47,67,14,0,6,5,0,9,0,0,2,1,2,1,5,19,10,0,1,18,0,0,7,2,9,0,1,10,17,29,3,45,53,5,40,0,0,6,0,15,16,1,4,16,160,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861405571148641,0.0,0.059863241362160334,0.0,0.0,0.1988970973793848,0.08730184704494534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229592306264033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732422397537067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610567576448736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18086158224628102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740323213386873,0.0,0.17031569790361187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17442843765014582,0.07962793895433155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3115733681572642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487805124075993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299595273376329,0.0,0.30017597679040675,0.0,0.070405424152388,0.0,0.0,0.2614898456366622,0.07784440770100677,0.0,0.07885735557005236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059004478635732174,0.0,0.08830100597953831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782448769725328,0.0,0.0,0.0967576850365667,0.07175598666606213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14784562023659986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08888494219029515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527293623721632,0.0,0.17003934144207689,0.0,0.08260994699325723,0.0862504539870655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669505834758215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403434689204431,0.061028737221945774,0.1537283457052382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430815653935272,0.0,0.0,0.08423257179159402,0.0,0.0,0.0986134545184779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278821019481415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07000478191103325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16027793690493636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281910998641837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776959402286623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18405559355088302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075496990635531,0.07694187217717166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116966094403761,0.16921770728963073,0.0,0.0,0.05133084887632339,0.0,0.08344189976702278,0.0,0.0,0.11953282906134878,0.1915021558681416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602943074610058,0.0,0.0,0.051922220984823686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408669860717675,0.0,0.08970982489243129,0.06253380107053796,0.0,0.0,0.056688265912203675
mentalhealth,The_Raging_Chilean,2020/02/27,"I dont get it. So a bit of background, I've been out of the Army  for just under 2 years now (In for 13 years), I had to leave the service after my mental health plummeted and I attempted suicide (They never knew this). I got help form the Mental Health team and I was medically discharged. After leaving I felt a great weight off of my shoulders and i started anew, now I have my own house, no debt and a solid job. Life should be good...... however

This week for me has been horrific, I feel so low and it got so bad I had to leave my desk and cry in the toilet. Like WTF why do i feel so so crap and down again?!? My life is going great but I cannot shake my depression right now, I cant sleep and I can barely concentrate at work. Its killing me. I don't get it, nothing has triggered me I have no reason to feel like this but I cannot shake it :(

I haven't seen a Doctor since coming out of the Army as I told myself once I left things would get better, which i thought they had. I don't really want to tell work about it either as I probably should have told them about it when i joined but I thought I had it under control.

I don't know what to do I cant go through this again. I barely made it through last time ...",0.6449425287356334,2.4064712260536427,2.4065042145593867,96.40391724137932,81.95019157088123,5.5553103448275865,19.252260536398467,6.55674776486733,-0.12567721072796936,934,23,224,9,25,308,133,261,0.132,0.759,0.109,-0.6207,3,0,0,0,0,1,36.0,0,0,3,6,14,13,2,2,9,0,29,10,3,4,1,33,51,19,2,4,5,0,5,2,0,3,6,0,0,0,16,11,1,1,9,1,1,5,12,7,0,0,17,6,42,6,29,30,4,32,0,2,1,0,8,12,1,0,17,154,58,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394079430061364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950557472077952,0.12283131448059052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691703524653167,0.0,0.0,0.12618905350454826,0.0,0.0,0.12358648338947925,0.0,0.0,0.09690433074841157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515831586231415,0.0,0.0,0.13186038215285342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706646626084231,0.08037686175134715,0.10802683436678424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763448253947194,0.0,0.12788356674866766,0.09436769222717964,0.1799683676621503,0.2480844038390402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391848307796308,0.0,0.0,0.07541279548181494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12982094193389165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164839113463304,0.0,0.12447517333949512,0.0,0.06183231918718848,0.09171031881241934,0.0,0.3573941795427379,0.12224198074924335,0.0,0.15893767805865827,0.10993298901672713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645927876367316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133415586408724,0.2267663750019173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677431903787983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795597012282183,0.0,0.0,0.11981902380630265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12130434941290882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207651372272758,0.11567857994699415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960825609822728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306908179759757,0.0,0.11259082651586272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963485516971462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306721230882725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833832625327446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474636128922413,0.0,0.0,0.17864006775196456,0.06560523705524123,0.0,0.0,0.21501543784180488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636106144184932,0.0,0.0902483933467062,0.1370063502034567,0.0,0.0,0.10152239029165096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381661890461896,0.0,0.0,0.07992357291971962,0.0,0.0,0.14490495305781326
mentalhealth,eturner47,2020/02/27,"Struggling This is my first time posting so I hope I explain things in the right way lmao.

So I’m at college at the moment and I’m just really struggling because the tiniest things will completely ruin my day to the point where I just lay in bed and cry for hours. I’ll give an example. 

So my bus is running a little late which means I get to class late and somebody is sat in my usual seat. For some stupid reason my brain can’t cope with this and even though I enjoy being there, I just can’t or I know I won’t be able to stop myself from crying. So I go to the library to do my work instead and then I’m trying to read but somebody is talking too loudly next to me, or the lightbulb is flickering, or somebody is clicking their pen, or there’s a slight breeze coming in from the window. These are NORMAL things that happen to everybody and everyone else seems to be able to just overlook them and carry on with their day as usual but for me, I get in a state where I’m so irritated and upset that I have to go to the only place (other than my house) which makes me feel calm: a toilet cubicle. I lock myself in there and just cry. Most of the time I will be able to compose myself and continue but it makes me miss out on things and sometimes I am in such a state that I just have to go home because even if I can stop myself from crying, I am just emotionally exhausted by that point. I know that this is a completely irrational reaction to things but I can’t help it and I don’t know why. I wish I wasn’t like this because I feel like everybody around me thinks I’m a brat who won’t stop complaining and I hate it. 

I do have a couple of friends who I hang around with at lunch & breaks but I’m not close to them because I am not a fun person to be around at all. I actually feel bad that they have to put up with me tagging along because I’m so boring. I used to be such a fun and vibrant person but it’s like my personality and my tolerance for the world around me has just been sucked out of me. My mum is my best friend and pretty much the only person who I can completely be myself around. She is amazing in so many ways but she does kinda have this thing where she dismisses issues. Like I have an older sister (she’s moved out) who has struggled massively with depression and anxiety. She has attempted suicide before and has been sectioned for a period of time. She also has two small children. My mum has said to me before that she thinks my sister does these things for attention and that she needs to basically get her act together for her kids. Similarly, when I’ve mentioned my issues to my mum, she has basically told me I just need to toughen up. Obviously this is a lot easier said than done. However aside from this my mum is amazing, she just doesn’t really understand mental health so I’m not trying to criticise but that makes it a little difficult to seek help because I find it near impossible to physically vocalise how I’m feeling to anyone other than her. Just thought I’d feel better by talking about it on here idk. 

If anyone has any useful coping strategies or similar experiences I’d be so grateful. Sorry if I sound like a problematic bitch, I know there are people going through SO much worse but idk this is just really dragging me down atm.",3.8254141716566856,4.914800648203592,5.082110778443116,83.41347554890224,71.70958083832335,8.201397205588822,26.19211576846308,8.59863814320734,1.7240822355289422,2595,82,530,44,48,863,275,668,0.151,0.72,0.129,-0.9236,1,0,0,0,0,1,43.0,0,0,5,5,46,32,4,4,27,0,56,4,1,7,2,106,107,52,1,8,32,6,5,5,2,4,2,4,3,6,41,35,1,3,19,1,1,10,11,16,0,2,9,10,85,16,83,86,8,78,0,3,1,0,47,41,2,14,26,382,126,5,0.18305204814398415,0.0,0.0595441311377104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0487955522552869,0.0,0.06611227256188965,0.0,0.04149388995336943,0.0,0.04667810526488637,0.0,0.0,0.0853294988229257,0.0,0.0,0.27159188689339786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05094693803702259,0.22317365904177766,0.0,0.10384254036674832,0.0,0.06403394370440292,0.05396488700548236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681155415585762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05256104364666556,0.1919265897680096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751453652190598,0.2680987725655708,0.0787022850231749,0.0,0.05255415361253996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067933872645231,0.06244193318831528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05097216583283789,0.06863630534329407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060276759607925,0.0,0.0,0.058304692174921076,0.0,0.05968667600631961,0.0,0.0,0.15426102606706588,0.04359080658986365,0.0,0.0,0.0557687519120459,0.051901326213030265,0.0,0.0,0.09428370554386917,0.0,0.095637139960564,0.05853340148768942,0.13871026319510812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05395744054501751,0.0,0.0,0.06024200005320099,0.0,0.06485858909245984,0.0,0.0,0.08179728619956084,0.0,0.06120537648004424,0.060603995670161885,0.060089798131561525,0.07040582883990669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737251989810014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413415791373684,0.0,0.1376604556616092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904997401175096,0.12231082782586887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051874768442942434,0.0,0.0,0.12218866355855836,0.061862015220985965,0.0,0.06646578132518803,0.0,0.0,0.0614911367426422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06485178594564789,0.08970954508295682,0.09048718283645618,0.0,0.0,0.06489264329377868,0.0,0.059784047183747364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928128875031353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04230174726023443,0.2131119837235786,0.06375014322268219,0.0,0.11536223543124735,0.0,0.05843775395407524,0.062076580453882764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133928923321901,0.0,0.0,0.06103386154263436,0.0,0.11726782935661502,0.06273599758919411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521084829785213,0.11608294418811067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05554790322538687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603477187477172,0.06830392706842497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303970877650394,0.0,0.1913657455808075,0.0,0.06674307670662276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808686827319243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28376050956480914,0.07819490742194392,0.059949235965150616,0.0484409597047095,0.10673912133833388,0.0,0.0,0.058304692174921076,0.0,0.08285354989183187,0.0,0.0596050841779256,0.0635212125983648,0.0,0.10539879768655984,0.13440397975468762,0.0,0.0,0.09686546363012953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05505866717506965,0.0,0.07016694049051171,0.0,0.0,0.044421357062730565,0.0,0.06218189187756758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Majestic-Whole,2020/02/27,"Mental Health Mood Diary Podcast So I have recently started a mood diary podcast to track my mental health and to share my feelings and interpretations of it. 

I was diagnosed officially with depression in 2018 however I have been experiencing these feelings for years. 

Would really appreciate it if people could check out my podcast. 

I'm just getting started at the moment but hope this may help somebody as well as myself in the future. 

Click the link below to follow The Mood Diary Pod on Spotify 😊

Apologies fir the self promotion appreciate your support. 

https://open.spotify.com/show/3kvuXQ7w7usCTZUx7faIIM?si=VDMVIfaMSDutmEFQYFEUlg",8.973030303030303,12.985534232323234,7.699282828282829,57.495590909090936,65.26262626262627,9.212525252525252,33.13232323232323,9.642632912329526,4.220482020202018,535,23,64,13,10,163,72,99,0.022000000000000002,0.7829999999999999,0.195,0.9574,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,3,8,0,0,6,0,7,3,0,0,0,15,16,7,0,4,3,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,2,4,8,4,14,11,0,13,0,1,1,0,5,6,0,3,6,46,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714102807053053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18490979317263065,0.21790301526305347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21710462419360685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216521469840064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4564049640290938,0.0,0.0,0.14390032217771515,0.0,0.0,0.21323285667244968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4327084576743652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883709086819796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753413435851314,0.0,0.21197773561863176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239655982659749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039134471088786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24362451991015935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19302959907658246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152507645675529,0.0,0.0,0.13825153474912782
mentalhealth,mjiyn2010,2020/02/27,"Boundaries I have BPD and really struggle with the fear of abandonment....that being said, I seem to really struggle when friends try to ""set boundaries"" by doing things like not talking to me. I can't understand how you could hurt someone like that when you know what things they struggle with; I never could. I'm left feeling abandoned, forgotten, unimportant, and unloved. A big part of me wants to lash out at the person for cutting me off like they did, but I know deep down that doing so will just push them further away from me, and I certainly cannot handle that. I just don't know what to do, because this situation makes me even more depressed than usual and all I want to do is fix what seems to be broken. Anyone go through this? I'm really wondering how to navigate this period of silence without going crazy....",8.005384615384617,7.256661461538464,7.597051282051287,75.3271153846154,62.589743589743605,10.876923076923077,36.16666666666667,10.125756701596842,3.541105128205128,652,26,119,12,8,206,100,156,0.16699999999999998,0.752,0.08199999999999999,-0.9152,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,3,0,9,14,1,4,3,0,15,0,0,3,3,31,31,10,0,4,5,0,1,3,1,1,0,1,0,1,11,7,0,1,8,0,0,3,6,9,0,0,2,2,18,5,24,24,3,18,0,3,0,0,9,9,0,3,8,89,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998547512729908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13417292071308476,0.0,0.0,0.08705449862673048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179861815863173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22804131156786495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300041626244247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094323410089674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069882726204066,0.07220807154163039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033319187443176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623222803535002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528790358526744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354508082278167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551614298429988,0.0,0.0,0.2093064877328034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532552264126576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014241861140102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546472670568002,0.0,0.0,0.12469453366983906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27445959707388395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358432157558385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600142804925003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16052229955884767,0.0,0.0,0.1210008485452342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.447882131988052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478374969588764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18975072593085707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695733281759757,0.0,0.0,0.1486682793656424,0.0,0.0,0.15728295787082014,0.0,0.16846384713510412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13766192234400934,0.15486930398509033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blainers1,2020/02/27,"I know I need to do something but I just can't my whole life is falling apart.  every night when I'm laying in bed, I'm terrified to go to sleep because when I wake up the next morning that will be one more day passed that I've accomplished nothing.  And actually waking up is impossible.  I sleep through all my alarms and frequently sleep through all my classes.  but even when I do get up, I can't bring myself to do anything.  I know I have so much homework, and studying to do, but I just can't bring myself to actually do it.  I've also completely stopped talking to a lot of my friends.  I have one friend who has been going through a lot of issues with migraines and anxiety, and I would talk to him about it and stuff.  But I don't want to talk to him about it because I'm scared to talk about what I've been going through.  I have a bunch of texts and snapchats from him that I haven't even opened or responded to in 3 months.  I feel so bad about it, and I really care about him, but at this point I'm too scared and ashamed of not responding to him for so long I'm scared to talk to him.  I feel like I left him all alone.  I feel like he deserves better friends than people like me.  That's how I feel about just about everybody.  My parents deserved a better son than me.  My sisters deserved a better brother than me.  My friends deserve a better friend than me.  I am a complete failure at everything I have ever done.  I hate myself",3.8200505050505065,4.459151973063975,4.623722222222224,88.36225,71.35690235690234,7.690841750841749,29.328114478114482,7.734863291789972,1.613206195286195,1124,43,247,13,20,363,134,297,0.153,0.68,0.16699999999999998,0.767,1,1,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,5,22,20,1,5,8,0,24,7,5,1,4,38,45,23,0,3,10,4,4,3,5,2,2,0,2,0,12,11,0,1,6,0,0,7,6,7,0,2,3,4,45,13,44,39,9,29,0,0,0,0,25,11,0,3,14,175,57,3,0.0,0.0,0.18131187686081265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621525720398012,0.0,0.07429122730336411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106741430410399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644789004342503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756671211173277,0.1132606304310573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32864615741614195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471663337089914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19480548597841849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0599121136631601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950678419927503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227177120044124,0.08403238553080987,0.0782713410480192,0.0,0.08349155300605357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878899272071564,0.13273400426997592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3588673493701527,0.0,0.048535847873198285,0.0,0.15838977964258075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917184438398629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969623294603328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021096263300829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009349409842344,0.0,0.06561724972343927,0.13615714941725354,0.0,0.0,0.0822126148024136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15795866777126022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415102618972297,0.0,0.06829139027028057,0.06888336700212133,0.0,0.0,0.09879904807782756,0.08717933687067429,0.0,0.08913901268987938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12590141562160415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315324923674392,0.0,0.0,0.06440440933218533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781950053366201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951342259314544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790240553067218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.278898010980122,0.0,0.0,0.07151812199311204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766765115307572,0.0,0.0,0.10634702971622906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3733431373127528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479418591902745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371831894951072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599272252017226,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,appeasing_ale,2020/02/27,"best natural remedy for depression, anxiety, stress. i am very interested in discovering some natural remedies for the above.
i have had lemon verbena as a tea (aimed at depression) and i enjoyed the relaxing effects. i’m looking to experiment with a bunch of different herbs/tea blends as to find something that isn’t too expensive and is effective. 
any personal experiences would be so much appreciated!",7.996086956521736,10.176216724637683,9.287652173913042,53.05408695652176,62.91304347826087,15.375072463768115,44.23478260869565,13.662883650711644,7.919751304347828,330,21,47,17,5,114,56,69,0.098,0.596,0.306,0.955,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,2,7,0,1,4,0,7,1,0,2,0,8,9,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,3,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,3,4,10,6,4,2,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,33,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701737941041872,0.0,0.19143517957576606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626145479220686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43106778979896415,0.0,0.0,0.2614506318660592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4895712657876741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22871753205094114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101410612327144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839573690401583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185025004890283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926492564945101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28665246537827965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206476649693245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777654190749603,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Scorfie,2020/02/27,"Sertraline withdrawal at work So I ran out of Sertraline a few days ago (an antidepressant) and the withdrawals have kicked in. I have been trying to get an appointment with a doctor however they're always busy. I'm fatigued, keep going light headed and just dont feel myself. My work knows I take antidepressants and that I'm trying to get more. I'm also on my last warning at work so I'm scared to ask if I can go home because of the withdrawals? 

Any help is appreciated and feel free to ask questions.",3.2430303030303023,5.444594313131317,4.552525252525252,82.01545454545456,75.56565656565657,7.632323232323233,25.141414141414145,8.515128840125781,1.8186444444444447,403,14,77,8,9,133,67,99,0.081,0.813,0.106,0.3446,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,4,3,0,1,6,0,6,3,1,0,0,13,22,8,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,6,0,1,4,0,1,3,1,2,0,0,2,3,7,2,12,20,2,11,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,2,3,43,8,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17254657544474478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15566252248501472,0.16196542089372365,0.0,0.0,0.13236951482923875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639452579028521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11865758630658027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553394362612866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19923378733330546,0.0,0.0,0.22812979799861116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19684302629139205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20339447294469076,0.0,0.22124956543730248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19976832422503046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047061990032865,0.0,0.19525105982372404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17301496155325916,0.0,0.0,0.1069752283108616,0.15866673646382046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21805393148151864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948798436441848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635350424515084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643108229521715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4251252525895718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ManicDepressentAcid,2020/02/27,"I'm depressed and anxious to the point of suicide, what should I do? I've been struggling with depression and anxiety for awhile now, its to the point that I contemplate killing myself every night.  I haven't eaten normally in days, I'm eating like one meal a day if that, I'm throwing up a lot from anxiety, and I don't get out of bed for anything but work now.  I haven't even showered in the last few days.   Friends and loved ones think I'm deteriorating.  And the sad irony is I just got out of a mental hospital a few weeks ago, was on a mental health hold for a week.  I don't know if I should tell my doctor about what I'm going through because he may just freak out and lock me up.  I was diagnosed bipolar in the mental hospital, and that's only making me want to kill myself more because bipolar is hell, I always thought my mood swings and manic episodes would just go away but now I gotta live with them forever?

I don't know what to do, I'm probably doomed.",4.824883333333332,4.796792255,5.66,84.16833333333334,68.95,8.866666666666667,30.16666666666667,8.59863814320734,2.045466666666667,761,27,164,11,12,250,112,200,0.215,0.7240000000000001,0.061,-0.9845,1,0,0,0,0,3,18.0,0,0,1,1,8,13,3,1,11,0,16,9,0,1,0,33,35,12,3,7,7,0,0,1,1,5,5,0,2,0,7,13,3,1,4,0,0,3,5,9,0,2,6,0,19,3,25,24,4,26,2,4,0,1,5,12,1,4,12,103,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11539681534506832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083202823294778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19917485988875272,0.14706647312528226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712714073875246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230850120726715,0.0,0.0,0.1587131769033204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25186620959860584,0.0,0.22424788073443488,0.13213007418369552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324486161571214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320675485641773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598273672148946,0.0,0.10968235962430206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057683219427413,0.0,0.0680137359321924,0.0,0.14796871616916588,0.0,0.104116928355481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13837537236960856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880500139658697,0.0,0.1430871709399782,0.10611416680931736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359942744408009,0.0,0.11495142457917044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106744765854594,0.11749263433874535,0.0,0.0868962361338506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3935728049247451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12216521718455288,0.12754887065181358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642682699080925,0.09900784189613218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24612456898241594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14035617948973908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609251899175467,0.0,0.14239591427445894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11378315647481893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341415981539191,0.0,0.10334846827341244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678360335751178,0.0,0.20884526822882246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477267252847604,0.0,0.0,0.09247621705630003,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Plzbekindurimportant,2020/02/27,"My country is burning , my people are burning and our fascist regime is winning. That would be India for u .

Hey , I just cant help it . Its troubling me , i cant sleep , i see the images of those crying over their dead ones - over their houses burned -over their shops burned . These images are haunting , and the fact that it’s still happening and it’s not gonna stop anytime soon cos our media is slave to the regime and whoever speaks against them is either called an antinational , jailed indefinitely, killed , vanished , transferred , or just straight up ridiculed online . No one can do anything . They are feeding so much hatred into young minds that people are burning places of worship . 3 so far of a community . People are putting symbols of their community after vandalising these structures . And the people are so blinded by hate that they are justifying this activities . 


And the death toll is just rising . People of one community are leaving their residences to move away from the majority . We have an order of “no offensive statements or whatever towards the country which may agitate the people “ , news channels are prohibited from “inciting violence”. And the judge who spoke against the police brutality was transferred. 

There are clear videos of police brutality , breaking cctv cameras and barging into colleges ( though previously they denied entering colleges cos no cctv footage was available) . 

And just like nothing happened during hitlers rule , like the jews was subjected to so much torture . All the world did was condemn it . They still do . 

But when there are clear signs of it happening again , we just dont care , nobody cares . Whyy?? Why can’t other countries step in , so much for peace treaties ? If they pressurise the govt and report the crimes happening the people who are blinded by the hate filled propaganda news will change .(we dont have press freedom ) Or just wait until another genocide , and then condemn it again .


I just cant stop thinking about all this . And the reason is that i might be the next one fricking dead and i dont want to  . I am not even an adult yet and i dont want to be killed due to the hate which our elders couldn’t stop from spreading .",5.958707196029778,8.186103735897442,5.412861869313487,78.66256823821341,68.05128205128204,7.801488833746897,32.324234904880065,8.460557738077197,2.697304383788253,1747,77,290,27,31,532,211,390,0.24,0.701,0.059000000000000004,-0.9978,0,0,0,0,0,0,50.0,6,0,11,1,24,17,10,0,23,0,45,4,1,3,5,59,61,28,6,5,15,0,1,2,0,5,2,2,0,1,22,19,1,4,3,3,1,6,14,11,0,4,6,6,28,6,35,46,7,37,2,0,3,0,25,13,0,7,18,211,50,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515030454126697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467246780513705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525456346274347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926571487389775,0.0,0.18503387737665186,0.0,0.09599240438015827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967520341764577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4253931353445416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05993386078781445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209693985990784,0.0,0.0,0.26876513691400983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608220698881308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047034306684754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007839026208119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608207566933537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866336141323444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626232081446943,0.09162297999912686,0.0,0.0,0.09644378292778792,0.20011618260865904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650454358621348,0.0,0.0,0.0870688524102595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459549740165521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4403607903035996,0.0,0.0948054843044204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912202032602677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329730623488718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230917388165681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080696552034782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14493245144625191,0.2275917037187398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05814344637926295,0.08915299734313217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070432965938783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188002948409304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644601106055605,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Naive-Turnip,2020/02/27,"My brother molested me at 6 years old I've been to 5 different therapist and they haven't been able to help me with any of my mental problems. All of them told me how I was supposed to feel and session generally made me feel worse and more confused. I was diagnosed with major depression and PTSD. I have traumatic history as I was molested at young age by my brother... He had attempted to molest me several times after that. I feel especially haunted that he has probably done it in my sleep in the past and recently because when I visiting my relatives (where he lives) and I woke up to my pants off and my legs up... I have low self-esteem due to growing up with a bipolar parent. Everyday was about surviving when I was younger. Often times my siblings and I would find ourselves getting yelled at or the parent saying they would kill themselves and leave for hours. My other parent had difficulty handling the situation and one time I couldn't stop crying about when my bipolar parent would come back. I was about 7 years old crying in the corner and they we're counting down for me to stop crying and spanked me until I held my breath saying ""I am trying to stop but you keep hitting me"" and struggled my way out of the corner to run to my room. Luckily, my bipolar parent has gotten on better medicine in recent years, so they aren't as crazy as when I was younger. I've also been in several relationships, all were emotionally and/ or mentally abusive. My first relationship with a pathological liar who cheated on me and used me. My second relationship was with, what I assume to be, a bipolar individual or an individual with anger issues, who often slash out at me. They would tell me I am horrible and doing things wrong. They would say things like they'd kill themself if I left, then turn to episodes of ""I'm sorry."" After these experiences it has skewed my view of relationships and can't imagine being in another one or how relationships even exist. I've been in 3 car accidents in 3 years. During the times of these accidents, I was in the process of learning to drive. But each accident made it more difficult to get behind the wheel. The most recent accident was with a drunk driver and now I can't comprehend driving anymore. Every time I get in the car, I have flashbacks of getting hit. I feel so pathetic to rely on my parents for transportation. 
I'm not even sure what to do anymore, I'm at a stage where I'm stuck. It feels so debilitating not being able to drive and having so many psychological issues. I want help but don't know where to go, especially since my bad experiences with all my therapist. I've been thinking about going to hypnosis therapy but I'm unsure if it will work. 

What kind of therapies what do you suggest? I really want to get on with my life instead of being stuck",6.265183942748521,6.719944527675277,7.122096611875211,73.25406183607294,65.90036900369003,10.407335346080735,33.398412165939845,10.300263719432786,3.4615576875768763,2242,92,409,52,33,749,250,542,0.187,0.753,0.06,-0.9976,7,0,0,0,0,0,52.0,0,2,8,5,25,20,8,2,16,0,48,11,3,5,4,83,83,45,2,11,12,8,5,1,0,6,7,4,1,0,18,32,1,5,11,1,0,12,8,16,0,4,27,10,68,4,80,42,8,82,0,2,1,0,37,34,0,11,35,293,86,3,0.12737493665215724,0.07545923571451417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05093084541071652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04330966239807989,0.06678186355255265,0.0,0.0,0.12632171049245516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04897173194994572,0.053176375824946484,0.03882328956586818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05632639022719975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0548611146890791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20987308026922416,0.0,0.0,0.05485392314708999,0.06464143974029338,0.0,0.0665398492140987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517439191429182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163982976795377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08412994435711169,0.0,0.05365943888270668,0.0,0.0,0.12459712937988195,0.0,0.0,0.16101148789988318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05820919225426462,0.0541725280234042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16637036798529092,0.0,0.072390111855988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537673508950994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271932743763818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294634081737805,0.0,0.056608348110627565,0.14092149523869024,0.06632069776993764,0.03500096702082608,0.0,0.0,0.06743583321283772,0.06919662068330176,0.0,0.044984342340909686,0.03111448004583782,0.0,0.05623720134043672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052524485739526,0.0,0.06456909673922295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283639772405452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365856924581507,0.0,0.08631255356477234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42430438003426135,0.0,0.06079689490449323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686658625957491,0.06094030600758491,0.07444724232986333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04079982302051536,0.0,0.18865107497572514,0.3418825330627266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15194049312210411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643991918483333,0.14389742258267035,0.0,0.052682931927470485,0.07158738279883232,0.06373346265403844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129290662121544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15973672576997394,0.0,0.06657996992630005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06002468518710088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05566565445578914,0.0,0.14566434089754451,0.14789211887553932,0.08462224806709027,0.040808358116090564,0.0,0.0,0.1856833747099488,0.0,0.0,0.0608561052520638,0.0,0.04323961043819082,0.06927367722186416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0550055243084983,0.0,0.0,0.0751290378082548,0.0505521479496011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04636523545547213,0.0,0.06490297119691166,0.22620875108056035,0.06963224878829474,0.0,0.1640505661052979
mentalhealth,toddtheoddgod,2020/02/27,"I have trouble feeling sympathy? Hello all. I never really noticed this behavior, but recently an event occurred that made me notice my behavior. I sometimes have trouble feeling sympathy for people. Not showing it... I actually show sympathy, and I’ve been told I am good at listening and what not. But, I actually don’t feel anything. Like... I just don’t feel bad. Is that normal? I had some pretty traumatic experiences when I was young, but I can’t imagine it’s correlated. Is anyone else this way? What can I do to help this?",2.53409090909091,5.379504151515154,5.029520202020206,73.69761363636366,83.24242424242425,8.552525252525253,30.472222222222207,9.075114841892004,3.648440404040404,417,22,69,13,12,146,66,99,0.138,0.645,0.217,0.7724,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,13,0,0,1,2,18,20,6,0,1,6,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,6,3,0,0,5,5,13,2,3,15,2,7,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,6,51,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.3761910515146672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347748017901899,0.19749444995506704,0.158616261876717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093762580290702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610173185522496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885458145010395,0.0,0.0,0.3898393779208141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16166897940996575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291958019980699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09416757853437456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18238406111500685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866015335074886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18885340288064864,0.0,0.4388927423833763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13362810472396788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960953466712971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348014599032035,0.0,0.1903166938372924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19063399984551424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841802293394414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299543348024475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hippity-hopp,2020/02/27,I just feel sad Idk what to do everything about my life is great but all of a sudden I just don’t feel like eating and nothing seems to matter anymore.,4.232500000000002,4.39943225,5.031250000000004,87.48875000000002,70.25,7.65,25.375,7.1686216300943375,0.96395,120,3,26,1,2,39,27,32,0.132,0.6940000000000001,0.175,0.5329,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,9,6,2,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,2,4,6,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34902251247667865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36011484836265295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31629427411220723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.355895333116358,0.2514206768170587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38800686766003656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24858036080619866,0.1719364621911515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3376887636978079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203861666542961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KirMa83,2020/02/27,"Panic attacks suck!! Currently just calming after second attack already today, it’s not even 10am yet. Distracting myself with apps like Reddit and angry birds really help after an attack, there’s no point at all to this post apart from saying fuck you anxiety!!!! Need to go shopping today too but there’s no way I’m leaving the house today.",4.068020833333332,6.5985005937500025,5.16375,77.03958333333338,74.3125,6.766666666666668,23.166666666666664,7.793537801064563,1.5931541666666669,274,8,42,4,6,90,55,64,0.29600000000000004,0.627,0.076,-0.9205,1,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,1,0,0,6,9,5,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,5,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,3,7,0,1,0,1,2,2,7,5,1,13,0,0,0,1,3,3,2,0,8,26,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19599217346143608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13586778221785029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6061559600913917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11730681024598305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16419349638364747,0.0,0.0,0.10093734377298487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904527619861775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20493299300397325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18805866450830253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676911495736618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13169228679445585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20838188032664787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16789467985890882,0.0,0.17009705047958187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11377868210209285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123908541369898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5050479675768434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14097504217710638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KeyValuable4,2020/02/27,"I need help but turned down I have suffered with depression for years and have been coping reasonably. I am going through an extremely difficult time and this is the first time i've noticed the warning signs and actually tried to get help. Which has been falling on deaf ears. I have contacted my psychologist who doesn't have any appointments open (even asked for an emergency one) until weeks from now, My psychiatrist who is away and her replacement isn't answering(been trying for days, even my partner has tried) and the suicide hotline who told me to not call as it doesn't sound like an emergency and they need the lines open for people who are actually at risk. I know I need help, I want help. But I can't find it. I feel like i'm afraid of my thoughts and scared I might do something (I have dissociative personality disorder). I'm just venting, know no one can help me but it is frustrating because i'm trying so hard but struggling",5.947160148975789,7.081876709497213,5.982807262569835,78.73704143389203,66.82122905027933,9.989013035381753,32.235102420856606,10.125756701596842,3.1804633147113592,757,31,144,18,12,239,107,179,0.263,0.654,0.08199999999999999,-0.9909,0,0,1,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,1,1,5,10,1,4,7,0,21,2,1,1,0,28,37,14,1,4,6,0,2,2,1,1,1,3,0,2,9,10,0,0,6,0,0,2,6,8,0,3,4,5,19,2,16,32,0,16,0,2,0,0,17,6,0,1,10,93,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.2584295823370961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004454717284015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378713477132905,0.0,0.1244052207607714,0.0,0.0,0.08071698866148712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352072261677051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539464032347395,0.0,0.11404606725016805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517553650596868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17491345634798142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695137165609945,0.09459499807547923,0.0,0.0,0.12102196294341072,0.11262938764657016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06917968702004228,0.0,0.07525266281171326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186149415230522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4437641062385241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455400966663514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12937940917175322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14046796775989145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945449587618041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15075168275300727,0.0,0.0,0.17945129032952242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179765215910868,0.1156168540299574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13614135721436876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256728557698394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193705297310324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384255362623375,0.0,0.14483698987305876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512015832042204,0.15442074093861693,0.0,0.0,0.12652512480373726,0.0,0.3595956122723801,0.1440259875292123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809989520116198,0.0,0.10621273845397036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526884141132515
mentalhealth,sncsnctemp,2020/02/27,"Help with sister... Hi everyone.
Over the past year, my younger sister (14) has done some minor self harming and just today was put on suicide watch. It freaks me out and my parents, and makes me feel sick and uncomfortable. My mum has told me that she has felt unexplainably sad for a while now, and that she thinks it's because of low confidence, but we really don't know. My sister is a fairly normal girl, has a decent amount of nice friends, one of which who has struggled with being in and out of mental hospitals for a long time. She has always been loud and bubbly, but in her teenage years, she has become very insecure (like us all). At first, it all seemed normal, but after the first time of you-know-what, my parents were incredibly surprised. They flipped out and got her help through therapy, even though she wouldn't tell then much about what she said to the therapist. My parents are broken and are probably gonna put her on meds, event though - as someone who is no expert on the subject - I think pills are last resort and are usually just sold by doctors like candy. I really just wanted to know what my family can do. Sorry if this all seems long and convoluted. Any answers will help.",6.1362422360248425,6.556749369565222,6.054534161490686,80.91565217391306,66.17391304347825,9.180124223602485,29.03726708074533,9.04235418022936,2.1815962732919254,945,29,182,15,14,297,146,230,0.11699999999999999,0.784,0.099,-0.1154,3,0,0,0,0,1,36.0,2,0,1,2,8,11,0,2,8,0,23,3,0,1,3,42,38,20,1,5,7,7,2,2,1,3,3,2,0,2,11,17,0,0,9,0,1,2,3,6,0,3,9,5,24,5,26,25,6,30,0,2,1,0,31,11,0,4,19,125,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463991074137214,0.0,0.0,0.07734638047548423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933420303467124,0.12561572484107714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641662612825165,0.0,0.116394426442923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512349814478084,0.0,0.0,0.1086824327517945,0.0,0.0,0.10722295151327768,0.0,0.05750982628107632,0.0,0.10920722046102843,0.0,0.0,0.19349257102511225,0.0,0.0,0.08787442403965856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096742174523524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22871044486416825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18752384310823286,0.0927124178340136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113420325478816,0.0,0.0,0.20131076809400208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592162662994477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633832336651746,0.0,0.11462210131928642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361120895228985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22288002715748925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770724503283991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37888090322541296,0.0,0.10857668946455327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12262981607179635,0.0,0.0,0.2286781021716704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457281567180772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081917792954348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20708732116051065,0.11865452149676352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637063601244768,0.0,0.0,0.1273214330336634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890463699837595,0.0,0.12441194139320927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941284809334336,0.0,0.13007039202032214,0.13205967747719208,0.0,0.14575864223623647,0.22349586502427188,0.0,0.13264418287337498,0.0,0.10781121737014566,0.1086824327517945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368139422843778,0.0,0.12526737511484132,0.09384653842000723,0.06708617455457169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648829846063974
mentalhealth,Pinkboiy,2020/02/27,"False memories(OCD) I have really bad OCD and have a huge problem of creating stuff in my head, stuff that feels so real, that I have a fear of touching people in an inappropriate way and even feeling sometimes as if I had. Thats how strong the creations are. What I’m struggling with now is that I’m having thoughts that I may have harmed someone and blocked it out for 1 years or so ago and that I may have done something that is disgusting to me. But, is it possible that, in a dissociative state, I could have done this and then blocked it out? The memory is now in step by step detail of what I think happened. HOW do I know if this awful thing really happened or I’m just creating it?",6.931952723535452,5.720980057553959,7.1801849948612535,78.95194244604319,64.97122302158274,10.820554984583763,34.24563206577595,9.957137785484203,3.0215171634121267,544,20,114,10,7,177,81,139,0.18100000000000002,0.7240000000000001,0.095,-0.9319,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,8,7,1,2,6,1,19,1,1,2,0,28,29,16,0,4,6,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,19,8,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,4,3,10,1,14,22,0,16,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,6,5,87,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16111092412377415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517541436623066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14511304999214802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.371987894256796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004454482098807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20451993363681556,0.18379710980286768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32144287761390605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18652853146227225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09988536629655584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126002968544081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20489647189403948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17391076035613368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068719517904705,0.2328681527464063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15399667773627418,0.13992047701812335,0.17975597226036466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900051698613096,0.4161218642958333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074701021817418,0.11645843373302688,0.0,0.14428965981874148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426515164621348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704141543314345
mentalhealth,No_Sleep0_0,2020/02/27,"Dark images flash in my mind when trying to sleep. What does this mean? I’ve experienced this for the longest time. This mostly happens when I close my eyes and especially as I’m trying to fall asleep, but I have vivid images, 1st person, of me either cutting myself, burning myself or shootings myself. And I snap out of it almost immediately. When I’m about to fall asleep I usually have these flash images and I then start twitching and can sometimes move my head violently. 

I’m wondering if I’m the only one who experiences this. And what it could mean?

Quick history: I know a lot of people that have self harmed, people have cut themselves in front of me and burned their skin with a hot knife and rubbed until they tear their skin. I’ve had a long struggle with depression and have attempted taking my own life and self medicated with many drugs and ended up in rehab twice before reaching 18. Least to say I’ve had a difficult childhood/teenage years.

I have issues with stress and overthink everything and have considered self harming but just drug myself until I don’t need to. I’m aware I’m depressed.",4.709673822135488,6.700253739336497,5.077128519654308,80.7688123780318,70.84834123222748,7.618734318371898,26.155840535266236,8.313332769828598,1.7871190967382216,893,29,160,14,17,283,126,211,0.177,0.813,0.01,-0.99,0,0,2,1,0,1,20.0,0,0,3,1,6,10,3,2,6,0,12,13,7,0,0,34,26,23,0,3,6,0,4,0,0,0,6,1,0,4,11,18,0,0,4,0,0,4,1,10,0,2,2,8,21,0,23,23,5,23,0,2,2,0,9,6,0,6,13,102,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371159413116874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165176214932876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093277226844882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23587577718723995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982865048685085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175914098518757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212796252023601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306414712254785,0.13394413307946718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210870345037147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14053001822755135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14291968406895214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525332578496056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671793831834466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12117902900476668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641326595323115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882585785890378,0.0,0.2983145336526743,0.0,0.13794289700755785,0.0,0.0,0.13826059417390568,0.0,0.0,0.14553526562989125,0.0,0.10153210122263366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927875322541356,0.10414168275925853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18986049294884189,0.11956227846260825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889249071358373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42854457825988734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702921481152766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542759308845811,0.0,0.09691998907209642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685322506994373,0.1431493068358796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029545634875985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798451738866779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18593340516471007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15080940802236814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849509680514927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817864010002588
mentalhealth,DeSkye19,2020/02/27,"Let's be Friends Any other lonely, depressed, anxious losers like me who just need someone to talk to? Let's be friends. DM me and we can chat on WhatsApp :)",0.981129032258064,3.521541225806456,1.5163709677419348,97.99455645161294,88.35483870967742,3.1,27.10483870967742,3.1291,0.2940258064516135,122,6,25,0,4,37,25,31,0.249,0.49,0.261,0.128,0,2,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,3,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031703151447276,0.0,0.0,0.3375191940532342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25732569213499656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4616499005007147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6110145181034489,0.0,0.1459613944429516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22153032017607366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531424530660851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401358363968675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Styrud,2020/02/27,"I think I might be broken I'm not really one to talk about my feelings and my mental health so forgive me if I don't make much sense.

I don't really know how to start describing this but I've been reflecting a bit on myself and I feel like I'm not really that well in the head so to say. I feel like I'm wearing a mask and masquerading as a proper member of society and under that is a void of apathy. I struggle to take anything to heart and see life like a terrible joke.  
I have Autism and ADHD and I had a pretty rough childhood (My father was a belligerent drunk and my mother have had cancer (She's healthy now, though)). I was sent to a treatment center^(1) as I had an aggressive behavior as a teen. The thing I remember the most is being pinned down by 4-5 adults until you calmed down every time you got mad. While their methods worked I think it might have made me unable take things serious and also get in touch with other negative emotions such as sadness.

Now as an adult I think my current strategy to life works. But I feel like this is not how 'normal' people work. The only thing really holding me together is sheer willpower and belief that I am the most important person in my life. I never suffered any depressions but had a 3-day bout of death anxiety which I suppressed by listening to monty python songs and accepting that life is pretty much a joke. 

I find it hard to explain but I don't really know if it's better to live life pretending that everything is fine or going on the long journey through whatever stuff I need to deal with to become something resembling normal.

Thanks for listening to me rambling. I just needed to put my thoughts into words and share them with someone. If you have any questions I will try to answer them to the best of my capabilities.

  
^(1)I'm unsure if that what it's called in English. In Swedish it's called a 'Behandlingshem'",4.00967840877405,5.6594261347708885,5.079633794962359,81.43005390835583,72.01886792452831,8.459559438609537,27.07881773399015,9.035553425615538,2.239343823775444,1500,53,283,31,29,493,203,371,0.127,0.7040000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.9539,3,0,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,3,3,5,12,23,2,1,21,0,26,11,3,4,1,64,55,34,1,8,13,2,7,4,0,3,7,4,0,3,20,16,1,2,19,5,0,4,8,8,1,1,11,12,43,15,45,39,6,25,1,3,1,0,24,11,0,10,14,199,63,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273983894836327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501879104470062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758627850989654,0.0,0.07176340595365728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719657484668117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036043493972939,0.0,0.0,0.09844645301679618,0.0829661802132084,0.10241481446258928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915783615555417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049885698603119,0.09671266030304787,0.0807973039789311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552217180964399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903788363722399,0.0,0.08430921922156821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18973000851097,0.20105088229720533,0.0,0.0,0.08573946093745098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04901117886919011,0.0,0.05331365139566478,0.0,0.07502739452554934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403417774730032,0.0,0.0962747996957988,0.09971427143862613,0.0,0.11116377235429667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310962679387688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33129932864278616,0.18332078788011427,0.0,0.08283480908819311,0.0830177558639073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876406906909333,0.0626180419858352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945371150686706,0.19903243249068586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379203904094418,0.13911593880354606,0.07235105984139156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18382523554687846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356720930306554,0.0713457507092628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503514750563008,0.0819101467098806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19087436467469476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943036631236966,0.10508722370127514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004813068734949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062669808772402,0.0,0.0,0.07460045095028357,0.0,0.0,0.07475339596681965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948381508529176,0.07221852760356443,0.0,0.0,0.06639828737036146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806923115814986,0.1073885287683905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106494971753555,0.07539988723478823,0.0,0.08636645605209219,0.0,0.0,0.1869670146141568,0.18032649953288335,0.09216658072912393,0.07447363675853529,0.05470061286243441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06368995594238375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434529575705732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20488157317965128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kesquen,2020/02/27,"5 months of self-isolation worsened my social anxiety I'm a college student dealing with anxiety and depression for a few years now. Last semester, I took a leave of absence so I could focus on getting better mentally but instead of seeking professional help, I took refuge in isolating myself from the world. (I've actually undergone therapy before but it just didn't work for me and mental health services aren't very accessible where I am) It was an excruciatingly lonely 5 months of my life. I'm not even sure if I made any progress since then. Anyway, now that I'm back it doesn't feel any different than crying alone in my room. When I'm around people, I just get this heavy feeling in my chest and interacting with people, even those close to me, is harder than ever. When people talk to me I keep stuttering and sometimes, I trail off mid sentence. I can't even hold the conversation for longer than a minute without making a fool of myself. Because of that, I feel like I can't talk to anyone anymore (except for my SO whom I'm very grateful for). I mostly keep to myself and scroll through my phone unless spoken to. And that's the story of how I ended up venting to strangers on the internet. 

Btw, i'm new here. I hope I'm doing this right.",4.57384335154827,6.017886803278687,5.65568306010929,78.65807832422587,70.31147540983606,8.373041894353369,29.12932604735884,8.841846274778883,2.372964298724955,996,38,184,18,18,330,147,244,0.11800000000000001,0.7709999999999999,0.111,0.0786,1,4,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,3,19,8,0,0,10,0,10,3,1,3,2,33,29,16,0,3,9,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,10,10,0,3,3,0,0,2,7,4,0,0,5,3,26,4,36,23,2,29,0,2,0,0,9,14,0,3,14,123,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.12065504667259865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12805400892158936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16815921681257973,0.0,0.18916890251696086,0.0,0.12261790283418628,0.08645213614099799,0.0,0.0,0.11006603392443788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507171881145343,0.0,0.07536994755902124,0.0,0.1052087444652988,0.0,0.0,0.10934975178778558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987166772842852,0.0,0.13581300666707985,0.0,0.12746766660460362,0.10649116438184288,0.0,0.0,0.1291777436155454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950856130801966,0.0,0.0,0.2449896530630487,0.11183968280261093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18754867300193653,0.08832861783527332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291938529747927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314238018852138,0.0,0.0,0.08287345197190678,0.0,0.0,0.12280266394715116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197942665967084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078330411796024,0.0,0.13091717032960862,0.0,0.0,0.0873307635989759,0.060404379835002964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699139210019867,0.08253082558449662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24920057886060626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973769326233428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941252191491172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571497404947598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558809618484853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289837435411178,0.0,0.0,0.10227649076187037,0.0,0.0,0.12603566239474984,0.0,0.0,0.12228336668900222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652947046444807,0.0,0.0,0.19875469577514668,0.0,0.0,0.14139339887776214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27473772955970793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040323064151928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918478690492593,0.0,0.0900115730510602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962026597080524
mentalhealth,GuyWithABlueShirt,2020/02/27,"HELP Strange episode that happened today I'll put this there to

I'm in a REALLY stressfull period
It was a few hour ago, like 5/5:30 am
I waked up for a bit and after scrolling some messages closed my eyes and tried to sleep again, so I could end the 8 hour cicle that I need (I was at 6:30/7 at that point)
While I was awake with the eyes closed I started to hear this voice in my head, but it was different from an inner dialogue, it just pop up out of nowhere telling me things.
The voice was really similar to my mother one (she still alive)
While I tried to shout down this voice not understanding what was happening I visualised a sort of a face, a black, 20/25 yrs old girl who I associated the voice with

So this voice was telling me how to do things in some ways, I was scared and I tried to silence that but after I ""talked"" she camed back everytime
After some minutes of trying to understand who she was (no response from her) I shutted her down whit a lot of mental work 

Is the first time that this thing happen to me, I used to have inner dialogue for safety reason and coping but this was different
Am I definitely going crazy?Whats happening I'm confused",2.8526026272578022,4.939064293103453,3.570295566502466,89.14235632183909,76.32758620689654,7.177668308702793,23.54761904761905,8.11559375814309,1.22168776683087,924,29,192,16,21,292,128,232,0.037000000000000005,0.912,0.051,0.4618,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,8,3,0,2,13,0,16,6,6,3,0,28,30,12,0,2,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,7,0,1,20,10,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,2,0,2,11,10,26,1,33,18,6,38,0,0,3,0,15,16,0,6,19,134,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060019783915087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593966594892547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13621544231217622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427025067971309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961790068216624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607141161524542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050830806240912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106128454829541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090910279186621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4413312883832913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804899850567816,0.0,0.14062374043230594,0.0,0.08363003633064857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245744680995092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06095583519127501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607414918248352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257378145102241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251463880609158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092408593759194,0.0,0.08454670915730371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794704187083226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542731490027864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15986044338249558,0.12828332091173836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249155435647105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248591151125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831214634703646,0.0,0.09964069130032452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028460280740543,0.218107225563324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24867295544198365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275381217944199,0.0,0.11826643113135712,0.0,0.0,0.3388398666758852,0.0,0.0,0.2597778759753827,0.0,0.10776036332341064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903583136987182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09083332412641376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CryHereAndThere,2020/02/27,"Cant find a therapist Hello, I don't know where to go to ask this question so please forgive me in advance.

I live in the philippines and I really need to seek help right now. I've already been in therapy in the past but the thing is my past therapist jams me with bible verses and the likes. I really want help but not in that way. I didnt mean to be rude, sorry. 

I've already tried the hotline here but most of the time, they cant be reached. What do i do? Thank you. Im really sorry.",-0.14385714285714354,1.929257590476194,2.2072619047619058,94.82232142857146,87.38095238095238,5.785714285714287,19.22619047619048,7.1686216300943375,0.3119047619047621,377,11,88,6,12,128,67,105,0.079,0.753,0.16899999999999998,0.8618,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,1,1,4,4,1,0,7,0,10,0,0,0,0,15,17,6,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,2,0,11,3,11,13,1,14,0,0,0,0,8,7,0,2,5,54,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35694065916464257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119339082380065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781601476896486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191347129926704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168050826026092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17469346405351566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08888121029886707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901189251852689,0.0,0.14280835486587978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17616867111334206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991889988546225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3087744174787572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17752824080462964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811718249778748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108203537249637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13811441040834455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3620814146333372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14889696300578065,0.1849495030902571,0.375556209961299,0.10744457177338344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430461202273822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980236364072953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539107598104056,0.12837177013693524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DatNoobi,2020/02/27,"Curious about Familial mental health issues On my father's side of the family there are two people, an aunt and an uncle, that have been in a mental clinic (or institution?) for extended period of time. For my aunt it was cuz her husband beat her early in their marriage. To my knowledge she started acting erratic to the point that she was taken to get help. For my uncle I don't know the answer. But he was kept there for a long time. This was in Mexico for context.

When it comes to my father it sounds like he has struggled with mental health in the past. He has always been kindof a proud man. But I know that in the years prior to my birth he would stare into blank space and not respond for a long time to his name. He also said weird shit about numbers according to my mother. I've done similar shit but independent of my dad and mostly cuz I sometimes like to figure out weird relationships between random numbers like the numbers on the side of a schoolbus. She even admitted to me that she thought he had some sort of mental problem.

What I'm worried about is how all this relates to me and my brother. We haven't been diagnosed with anything as of yet so I don't want to blow anything out of proportion. However its just concerning cuz it sounds like it might be a family thing and I'm not even sure if that's possible. I remember in fourth grade I saw a woman called Mrs. Crow and she would just sit me down and talk to me. According to my mom she was seeing red flags everywhere and it all came to a point when I said that I didn't want to live anymore at age 8 and when I promised her that I wouldn't ever kill myself.

Is there any way to get ""checked"" for mental illness? Again, I don't want to blow shit out of proportion about something I don't necessarily know about. But some stuff just has me concerned. I know my mother has tried helping me talk and meditate through my stresses and anxieties, but one of the points she stresses is not wanting me to be forced to take pills and ""become a zombie"". Which is a statement that I'm sure is uneducated but also an attempt at supporting me.

Can mental issues be familial? Is there a way to get checked? And should I be worried? I knew my last girlfriend was worried about it when I mentioned my familial track record.

Also sorry if anything I said was insensitive/uneducated. This is a topic I want to know more about for the sake of my family present and future.",4.4639452121805085,5.602742989604992,5.431718845542374,81.3173153356977,70.24740124740124,8.40310627369451,28.28427296074355,8.757208317658263,2.102155387061269,1922,68,375,33,34,632,214,481,0.11900000000000001,0.813,0.068,-0.9691,1,0,1,0,0,2,41.0,1,0,1,3,28,19,4,3,24,0,41,9,3,5,5,80,72,36,1,12,15,10,0,4,1,5,6,5,0,3,23,23,0,1,13,0,2,3,10,10,0,2,22,9,55,9,66,41,6,50,0,0,4,0,47,21,3,10,27,267,78,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16751744195617968,0.058100118470679626,0.0,0.0,0.04748349648368172,0.0,0.05341604871707565,0.0,0.06924778633516986,0.0,0.0,0.17238044716542125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07711639241705673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129928518580038,0.07986137009773889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06014818408155585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087105755745685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145537134054344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09223770622673699,0.06316084584305202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3949496234873805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944227702271762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14844173879910205,0.0,0.0,0.09360465254032324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575863115017482,0.0,0.0,0.07725118314404338,0.0,0.19187038208505372,0.056916816781237424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13645216536378502,0.0,0.06165688680637501,0.1235861211624327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4222039695836825,0.07407344989357165,0.0,0.08177837190351209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04731532880607445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665600666386763,0.04840796728246558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19802200902127576,0.07871736533151083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681323856622662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496607988907293,0.07909828347919885,0.0,0.1992591226696009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05564160434789103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21502353953177172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05375481190564749,0.06905885888683122,0.0781635388829541,0.049422600638492485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15996894708118078,0.07299640756422207,0.07993309135928896,0.0,0.07923675288346603,0.13161875527074846,0.0,0.052499823038288325,0.11224562146329403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04638872708821976,0.0,0.0,0.05543336964525696,0.12214681965069625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047406693483914734,0.0,0.06820902566986872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20592341322134247,0.11084790813395312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21273248800146305,0.0,0.09920356651857,0.0,0.0,0.044965107365696415
mentalhealth,PrivateQuestions_,2020/02/27,"Does anyone else get scared to go to sleep at night? I’m not sure if this makes sense and I’m probably not in the greatest state right now but here we are.

I suffer from some mental health issues, and this past week especially has been really stressful and I’ve drained myself out.

When I am at work or at school- I feel that it can be a major distraction from my thoughts and a lot of the time it gets me through the day because I’m too busy to even think about anything else than what I’m doing.

But every night when I turn off then lights to go to sleep, there’s nothing to distract me. I’m left with nothing but me and my thoughts and every time I go to sleep all my negative thoughts come out and I usually end up falling asleep after 2 hours of chest pains/ crying.

I’ve noticed that I end up staying up more and more and avoid going to sleep for as long as I can. I can’t really function without 8 hours of sleep, but every night I put off going to sleep for as long as I can because I don’t want to face my thoughts.  

I love actual sleep, but the time between turning off your lights and falling asleep absolutely terrifies me.

Is this normal? Or should I say, can anyone else relate to this?

Sorry if there’s any typos or something.",4.111482077205885,4.720252128906253,4.7563786764705895,87.78310661764708,70.6796875,7.586029411764708,27.168198529411764,7.510576382923642,1.286858731617647,979,31,210,10,17,314,137,256,0.172,0.792,0.036000000000000004,-0.9882,0,1,1,0,0,0,19.0,1,1,0,1,9,9,0,5,6,0,14,14,11,1,2,43,38,27,0,5,13,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,9,15,0,1,6,0,0,9,6,7,0,0,5,4,25,2,41,31,7,46,0,1,0,1,4,14,0,7,21,133,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.07934699561545418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055293703028156116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370792116040496,0.1666237534525753,0.06691134084661178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913184841294903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004151072639256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931540239486556,0.05243833225324488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711550766560018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037726376170233,0.0,0.1440333508392813,0.0,0.0,0.05370459963760499,0.0,0.205521972277213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041112864442242325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849624144885652,0.0,0.2310522136116594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642890719896132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601482751625512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486669118161999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834373631100118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391388141152792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912699783418366,0.07338560190249008,0.0,0.054275169057475314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194152579409587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22891225594931805,0.0796667016400319,0.15603859982100174,0.0925721660984024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651975239582248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761975655649775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766611431055284,0.0,0.0,0.08173917766281566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417875239765068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694384398835597,0.0,0.06466110978057166,0.08140566364193434,0.08229023176783082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5695822302168999,0.0,0.0,0.06259654039728793,0.0,0.09102007700947397,0.0,0.08666582127806202,0.0,0.0,0.09314052364144476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766338718272083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05210027300600232,0.0,0.25820476637125545,0.14223783991813702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17688422970223466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895516635185288,0.0,0.04795884423177732,0.0,0.0652221128571845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783801011625792,0.0,0.059194771285473485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,witchydolly,2020/02/27,"I genuinely feel like the majority of people in my life don’t care about me as much as I care about the. I feel like I go out of my way and even sacrifice my own time and energy and resources to help the people in my life. I try to be very compassionate and caring because I don’t want anyone to suffer. But when I am not doing well I get ignored or shrugged off (aw that sucks anyways I’m busy) at worst and treated like my problems don’t matter or are a bad thing (how can you feel bad when you have so many good things, you’re ungrateful) to them at worst. I don’t know if I just pick shitty friends or I just don’t deserve to have someone be there for me.",4.527042253521127,3.8571187112676064,5.625457746478876,86.34551056338032,69.63380281690141,8.790140845070423,28.31338028169014,8.07648339933343,1.517095774647887,515,15,120,6,8,172,86,142,0.191,0.603,0.207,-0.0718,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,1,0,12,19,1,0,4,1,13,2,0,2,0,24,25,16,0,3,8,0,3,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,6,8,1,0,0,3,21,11,18,23,5,11,1,1,0,0,6,6,1,4,6,84,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186441492563836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833513007342885,0.10343530775288363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5189999782669165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207199059016967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573858061319336,0.24243874554971195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310942896337076,0.0,0.08865075786183828,0.0,0.09643301201184992,0.14231947121022848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137328774515246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932516496137031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396998990102973,0.2486911223984701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202881227300473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473426896168505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23526939147570103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16236077305492208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376925035547028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254556058859977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894172916559274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520153142100314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400037089654317,0.10008161639279016,0.1346840270159205,0.0,0.0,0.15256263088265484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sbousel89,2020/02/27,"Should I run away? Or just quietly fad away? My depression has finally gotten the best of me. I have lost my job, filed for bankruptcy, have no saving, behind on rent, it goes on and on. Worst part is my wife doesn’t see my issues as an issue. She sees me as the problem. She is no help to me. Just asks me if I have money for the bills. I don’t respond to her. My thoughts now are do I run away and start fresh with what I have in my pocket or do I just take enough meds to softly drift away without anyone noticing. I have nothing left. I feel no passion or love. I just want to end this endless cycle of bad luck in my life. I want to die! No one cares or sees my issues. So fuck it.",-0.4965858505564391,1.49932175,1.6782670906200323,98.53636724960256,88.25675675675676,4.563434022257551,16.813990461049286,5.900188976854957,-0.6287007949125591,521,12,126,4,17,174,89,148,0.192,0.654,0.154,-0.8198,2,1,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,0,2,6,12,1,0,4,0,14,4,0,0,0,21,29,10,1,5,10,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,3,3,7,6,0,1,3,6,26,6,23,25,4,17,0,2,3,3,8,10,1,6,4,93,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431707501732203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261024045266135,0.0,0.5069282038905704,0.0,0.11262614319843398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14155700795937404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375276690590947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161791436050027,0.0,0.13999281768748514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947104667352955,0.13937572996157746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820360587378715,0.0,0.0,0.14776360100746605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470211181335232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041282188598257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4223651965648291,0.1338558799871869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14655659376976932,0.0,0.09527563515898503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14724657503214394,0.0,0.12174200793037936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14983055541728135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294290158040464,0.15357128765202235,0.0,0.0,0.0914038411494014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607094507044574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906993988384602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322465667688198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547467283733883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141925685502844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070862877059966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912129473448527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002756194597453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cukimunstrr,2020/02/27,"Is this how therapy works? I have never been into therapy before and I am certain that I have been in need of professional help for years. It's been a few weeks that I started therapy on my own (without letting anyone else know). Initially I found it extremely difficult to open up to my therapist as I have almost internalised everything that is an issue with me but now with every detail I provide her with, it brings back too many unpleasant memories.
For the rest of the week, my head feels like a mess and my thoughts are chaotic. I am afraid I am going to get worse over the days.
Is this how the entire procedure is supposed to progress?",5.72975806451613,6.52101552419355,6.442096774193548,76.48314516129034,67.14516129032258,10.393548387096775,33.24193548387097,10.411451182825502,3.567487096774194,511,22,94,13,8,168,84,124,0.138,0.784,0.079,-0.8676,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,1,7,0,15,1,1,2,2,19,24,6,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,5,1,15,2,18,18,3,16,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,9,75,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16892530908258235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795660770473675,0.1728496354494975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971729722638406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354840900357982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879537191715943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092438961775433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14213418854908946,0.0,0.15161365550052794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529808606368734,0.1205169078309911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18496715000414227,0.0,0.0,0.0881370276863765,0.0,0.09587418375842018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313141373188087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307379666645105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760754553728531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927112573206918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17250373608571296,0.0,0.08241665335168552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103190718110212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12508641531220333,0.13010924265663934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940434462735125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5787579033187447,0.19586979240622224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339262824591723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706365256336405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16261753359556375,0.0,0.12281315749044945,0.0,0.17191628048259308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863510027268436
mentalhealth,koala_22,2020/02/27,"Today I did a very bad thing... Today I did The Thing I Definitely Shouldn’t Have Done™️ and it knocked me flat on my ass. I‘m recovering from disordered eating and thought I would be fine with doing a very light fast... yeah, haha, noooope. I’m feeling really dumb, really down and very sketchy mentally right now. I could honestly just use some encouragement :,\",2.5604411764705866,5.361832691176473,3.8632352941176498,82.50455882352944,82.38235294117645,8.105882352941178,24.676470588235286,8.841846274778883,2.323994117647059,285,11,54,8,8,93,54,68,0.14300000000000002,0.63,0.22699999999999998,0.5232,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,3,2,8,2,1,1,0,12,13,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,7,4,4,6,1,7,0,0,0,1,1,3,2,1,4,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790256282065701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17119107464785802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457355022234332,0.0,0.0,0.21941860975722186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21939769544941395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841349122641213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160775467308334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27471650083900745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831072535378286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848925088526996,0.0,0.0,0.17021971439702208,0.0,0.0,0.4064762919415429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851837097093215,0.0,0.5307387377541659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523126130345372,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,professornaruto,2020/02/27,"WHAT'S WRONG WITH MY BRAIN!? I recently was hospitalized at a children's hospital, I worked the program and got out. I had to take abilify orally for it to build up and then once it was built up in my system I got a shot and then I got to go home. When I was on abilify I could barely talk and it was hard for me to communicate and I would stutter and lose words and sound autistic and it would make me so tired like I was high on Xanax or something. So I told the doctor and she said she didn't notice anything but that's a bunch of bull crap cause all the other kids noticed it. But anyway she lowered the dose to I don't remember but she lowered it and all the side effects still happened and I just stuck to it without saying anything cause the more they switch meds the longer you'll be there. So I dealt with it and before I left they gave me a shot that lasted 30 days cause I would refuse pills at home. That's one of the reasons why I was in the hospital actually, for refusing medication. Well it's been 5 months since my last shot cause I don't need to take it anymore. But my question is, is why is it harder for me to communicate and why do I talk really fast, stutter, repeat myself and lose my words and forget things a lot? It's hard for most people to understand a word in saying and I just feel like I developed something or ability just destroyed my brain and killed a lot of brain cells or something. I never did this before I took abilify. If you listen to me in a video from a year ago and then listen to me in a video now you'll think my past self is smart or average, and you'll think my present self is autistic or something is wrong with me. I really need help. I'm going to be seeing my psychiatrist next month and I'll be telling him about this and a lot of other things too. And the fact that I am self conscious about the problems I've developed from taking abilify makes me anxious to even talk or socialize and makes my communication skills even worse. I don't like talking anymore and I use to love talking when I could actually do it without sounding like a complete idiot. Now days I'm anti social and don't talk much at work or school pretty much only if I have to. I don't even use my mic anymore when I'm playing a video game. I don't talk to my friends or my online friends anymore because of it. Is there a cure!? I understand avoiding these problems will only make it worse but it's hard not to avoid them.",2.7103824505700693,4.2241930473372795,4.035049790734593,88.15821474960312,75.13412228796844,6.997623514696686,25.18636647904941,7.678348718463194,1.1839711261846348,1933,65,413,26,41,636,210,507,0.153,0.754,0.09300000000000001,-0.9798,2,2,4,0,0,1,30.0,0,4,3,6,22,24,4,2,25,0,39,11,4,12,4,95,73,49,1,11,21,0,4,4,2,7,6,7,2,5,28,29,0,4,10,5,0,3,11,14,1,1,18,12,65,10,49,43,10,44,0,2,1,1,43,16,1,15,28,279,93,5,0.0,0.0,0.1210867988241843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054995905588000375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008905615785585,0.2461133577448346,0.0,0.0,0.1021094750381713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037819825731090426,0.0,0.10558522355209386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077759651516723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549341898273903,0.0,0.0,0.06504916583215413,0.0,0.0,0.09906992515074643,0.0,0.0,0.08002306500673237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350194160550596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293316215337867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031369966229913324,0.04432234652919405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958659725774286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051904786179047,0.0,0.14886038435709767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486295310306923,0.0,0.16673056658439514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04158500321175105,0.06555008325343313,0.12446504747306572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863955181656656,0.0,0.0,0.10114394720415383,0.0,0.0,0.06740809871308795,0.0,0.0,0.1212410618683504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388167824203438,0.0,0.15823598893334814,0.055994732662743615,0.0,0.1656523079629015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06891394382207736,0.06250012414991454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904161322795722,0.0,0.0912150486581672,0.09200573671101908,0.04785010703863776,0.0,0.06598167017930454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126895626143945,0.0,0.06607200353705882,0.042040818420175256,0.09437047130129586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922548027204851,0.04301165423478254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06311834823593687,0.0,0.11873036926950292,0.0,0.0,0.06950050093976028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794905436272871,0.06378883169483561,0.06125833968345101,0.0,0.07028074531037877,0.0,0.05901552277804074,0.09867552931296654,0.0,0.06278914949443985,0.04943891639397435,0.0,0.19416794866609366,0.0,0.0,0.051321238534395616,0.0,0.0,0.12648666854754773,0.0,0.19104982199729492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495462952014355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994210226183545,0.3490653596445656,0.05422686676648606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243502059351804,0.07950717260596776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130739502638493,0.0,0.05928316021240487,0.06893021283825962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291744483293874,0.0,0.10716759794737107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055782616578504106,0.0,0.16794798148124598,0.0,0.0,0.11961127787734345,0.0,0.09033367056296833,0.0,0.12645085398714792,0.13221716614507226,0.13566493431574045,0.0,0.03995258960901985
mentalhealth,purplegroundsushi,2020/02/27,"What do I do from here? I have suffered from terrible anxiety from as long as i’m capable of remembering, i’ve been put on countless medications yet none of them have made any difference. I’ve also tried meditating and exercising and they have been equally ineffective. Is there anything that has worked for you that you can recommend? Please help.",6.027619047619049,8.26366319047619,6.743047619047619,69.16028571428575,67.8888888888889,11.38920634920635,34.822222222222216,11.20814326018867,4.693942222222223,283,14,48,10,5,93,47,63,0.136,0.715,0.15,0.2406,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,2,2,4,3,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,1,0,4,12,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,0,6,0,9,9,2,4,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,36,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401564422183304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042199447372877,0.0,0.22973503058761344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24712814627435445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137582603260639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012903259504832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26576339889756595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28415897840520404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025290222540353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296483369117262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30189279124010604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3401907668380662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20388962566793564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21862802197385955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rowsof,2020/02/27,BPD vs. Cognitive Distortion Can you experience cognitive distortion mainly black and white thinking without having BPD?,11.357058823529409,16.343319117647063,9.936764705882355,38.9604411764706,63.70588235294118,15.164705882352939,49.67647058823529,12.161744961471696,10.03914117647059,103,7,8,5,2,32,14,17,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8568746889761838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327555238186102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21796981437181825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32791567328031984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VapingHamsters,2020/02/27,"Black and white thinking I posted something a couple months ago, mentioning my thinking patterns.  Someone suggested that it was black and white thinking and I agree with them.  Sometimes I’ll really like someone, and others I would find everything that they do annoying.  I try really hard to find something that will make me dislike them less but most of the time it just doesn’t work.  I was advised to try therapy, but I don’t like talking to others about my problems.  Does anyone know any ways to help with this?",4.9836052631578935,7.2695141368421075,4.815986842105263,81.68503289473686,70.78947368421052,7.697368421052633,30.822368421052627,8.472884824447931,2.5842894736842097,413,18,70,7,8,127,61,95,0.08900000000000001,0.7979999999999999,0.113,0.517,0,0,2,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,3,1,2,4,1,0,2,0,7,0,0,1,0,19,12,6,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,5,12,2,8,8,2,5,0,0,4,0,8,0,0,1,5,46,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600896344766919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281314300355932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12627863949534393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998287564265967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804292579813115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16231024711601308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301274337692191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617807433432613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105133814423184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992521883103423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764625663542594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055087168974432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14415196449738166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729633987373572,0.0,0.0,0.17280833195139386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313919906870765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060409712563633,0.2780670292031467,0.17861649078529296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145158197912325,0.0,0.0,0.2065300736442876,0.0,0.0,0.3471605949027729,0.0,0.0,0.1053084119752799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452289935374402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14335064813496898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13147782681951936,0.0,0.0,0.12829196145544225,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eerieex,2020/02/27,"Can I lie to my therapist? I’m trying to find a therapist to help me deal with my anxiety but I’m not sure what is important for me to disclose in the initial paperwork. I have suffered from depression for many years but I have been doing ok for the past year. I also have some repressed memories of childhood trauma but it hasn’t troubled me in years. They are things that I will need to bring up eventually but I’m not ready for that right now. I don’t want it to impact my performance in school and at work if it turns out to be more than I can handle. My anxiety is already enough to deal with on its own. 
I’m worried that if I mention it, the therapist will want to dig into those. But I‘m also worried about getting assigned to a therapist who wouldn’t be able to help me later on when I’m ready to discuss my other issues and having to find someone else. Would it be a bad idea to hide those things? Would I be able to ask for someone who specializes in all of my areas of concern and just tell the therapist I want to focus on managing my anxiety for now? Any advice would be greatly appreciated!",4.318112094395282,4.974331283185848,5.688654867256638,81.11312979351034,70.23893805309734,9.035516224188793,30.110914454277285,9.21078282632365,2.4898988790560472,874,34,177,17,15,295,117,226,0.187,0.7340000000000001,0.079,-0.9814,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,7,10,0,1,7,1,24,0,0,0,2,32,38,13,0,10,10,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,17,7,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,1,0,22,4,41,26,5,23,0,2,0,0,11,13,0,3,9,134,39,4,0.2065925606420737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093992962349528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11399001395899253,0.16521199610563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024501279868957,0.0,0.2370641151337222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656807812731047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862480793795543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21298785857308167,0.08896893487898676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629078751903989,0.0,0.0,0.1067326704078827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18882185768704954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396804307099645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388451372184735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847463861410386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660892721599643,0.0,0.10781447943900042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472621525324168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659288299563344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860798778417744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821445899287866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045413504100988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17504520621382993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735552174131347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902855019684406,0.0,0.0,0.5996747150641699,0.13725091744862405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701313937920635,0.11235669071569293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827804673430587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520092232647581,0.20980477357356264,0.0,0.22013614147498906,0.0,0.0,0.19955825347549613
mentalhealth,al_kimia,2020/02/27,"I've been struggling with intrusive thoughts for years and I can't take it anymore. What do I do? So, hi.  Long story short, I'm 19, I've had intrusive thoughts about literally every single thing a person can freak out about since I was, like, 11.  For a long time I had no idea what these kinds of thoughts were called until a couple of years ago when I finally discovered the term.  I learned that it's primarily associated with OCD, which makes a lot of sense, but that's besides the point.  

I freak out about violently harming others or being violently harmed, about committing suicide, about whether or not I'm a p\*do, of inc\*st, of doing gross things, and the most debilitating of all, my sexual orientation.  It gets to the point where sometimes I'll be consumed by my thoughts, my stomach is in knots, and I want someone to distract me but I want to be alone at the same time.

I just want to know how to stop them.  Even better, I want to know how to find a therapist that can help me out or if there's a way I can get an official diagnosis.  I'm sorry if this isn't the correct subreddit for that but I don't know which one is.  Can someone please tell me what to do so I can stop feeling like I'm about to die all the time?",3.721365461847391,4.82411697991968,4.922269076305224,84.4110341365462,71.97188755020079,8.264257028112452,28.29116465863454,8.680891452615391,1.92889718875502,964,36,206,17,18,319,134,249,0.212,0.696,0.092,-0.9902,0,1,0,0,0,2,32.0,0,0,1,1,15,13,2,2,15,0,22,1,1,3,4,46,42,18,2,6,11,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,17,8,0,2,11,0,0,0,5,9,0,1,9,1,21,4,33,30,7,24,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,7,16,138,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986019382217853,0.0,0.0,0.1283584584377521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290942796100696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960973177048723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265506786570685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371308391329176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12862413675804488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185737269557908,0.0,0.10441991185950587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06266485719921353,0.08853861988979501,0.0,0.13576386230237691,0.11327361692860008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12950101248007193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307048432230382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990663065937745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290584016492514,0.20433299158985407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109598354327238,0.0,0.0,0.21935574059324967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536442806059076,0.0,0.0,0.08272704333768775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398102387264274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821456630977844,0.0,0.13604253892477414,0.2343157631512916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102519654005173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21001809723443995,0.0,0.122574096453238,0.13873419440460222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20722908740668008,0.0,0.12956293871260322,0.0,0.1355639035176107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318309738390693,0.0,0.10832395665897457,0.0,0.0,0.14389716272896308,0.1646727559681312,0.0,0.0,0.3935596566262636,0.2168010924978622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923984174778884,0.09837320223837163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15961912768657313
mentalhealth,Biengo,2020/02/27,"Help with the feeling of intense anger, loneliness and depression. I know that is a very generic title and I am one I five billion people dealing with similar issues but I just would like some help. I’ve fallen into this deep well of a mixed bag feelings and I don’t know how to deal with them. I have no one to talk to. I’m normally a very peaceful and collected person yet recently I find myself feeling these extreme waves of rage. Some to the point where I tear up and want to break down. The feeling of anger like I could punch though a solid brick wall. To put it in perspective the only time I raise my voice is when I’m singing in my car, I am not a violent person. I feel lonely and disconnected from everything around me. I’m a student and all I do is spend all my time studying or doing homework. Not that I have to I just do. I have tried to make plans to go out for trivia or bowling or whatever it may be and I always just let time slip by. The depression has come and gone throughout my life. I started smoking heavily again as a way to slowly kill myself. This is all wrong and very strange All of this is such a strange feeling because “I” don’t want any of it. But there is a part of me that has given up. When I look in the mirror that is me. But the person that is in this body, That is the guy that doesn’t give a shit about his life. I’m not angry, he is. I’m not lonely, he is. I’m not depressed and suicidal, he is. I’m trapped and have no control and have no idea how to fix it.",1.1548113207547177,2.9858869339622665,2.978591194968555,92.58732075471704,80.60377358490567,6.001006289308176,22.864150943396226,7.0316486544052195,0.645716226415094,1167,39,262,14,30,389,156,318,0.184,0.68,0.135,-0.9758,0,5,0,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,1,2,16,15,6,0,18,0,32,4,2,4,4,60,57,25,2,5,14,0,6,2,0,2,2,1,1,4,16,20,0,1,10,1,1,6,11,12,1,4,2,8,31,3,36,50,7,31,0,5,1,0,15,14,1,6,11,185,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09592794043811263,0.0,0.0,0.07839904878642615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262978773251416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027782726052811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12805776193168233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930946049529857,0.0,0.0,0.12930406705148895,0.09204721269688497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377114737389437,0.2978893271488239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361243651110208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497551390453039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537014261193764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059370437493037,0.06552020492434109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415216137506692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545487646148223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13014488302449653,0.0,0.12032957638779182,0.0,0.0,0.12754787925527686,0.0,0.12671733599842105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788867133440105,0.16286110094299092,0.11264671687609686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681196448807138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695490433443719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11295668921558925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15624278101289493,0.08768088631295601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484448353589635,0.0,0.07992542398249852,0.301992235983894,0.0,0.0,0.10898338928754878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158951820261754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383191041520965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11834035131044415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816006647686699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261051622964021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09266324728411396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326879886225667,0.0,0.20167416433186852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827224089375663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853713114484805,0.13599840715146636,0.09150937906029756,0.0,0.0,0.10365677303535673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189650960044255,0.1260481326241903,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dev_dog999,2020/02/27,Why do I go through these “episodes” Every once in a while I think about how alone I am. I feel like no one cares about me the way I care about them. I feel like I try so hard but no one wants to even talk to me.,-0.02153061224489861,0.8634243469387783,1.2283163265306136,108.07471938775512,81.04081632653063,4.9,16.331632653061224,3.1291,-1.5006775510204082,159,2,48,0,4,50,35,49,0.151,0.69,0.159,0.0909,0,3,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,6,9,4,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,3,10,4,7,9,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,31,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454720465719596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4832972755800893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156543612685501,0.0,0.1996920949268564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396798922649936,0.3386415899587117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346988841992018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21231541417324834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23158332745501914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524091128028333,0.3212097442448411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19050056436572405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186715874052484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609149959823051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979530220734804,0.18812839897887185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138656754920973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,danitvelasquez,2020/02/27,"MENTAL HEALTH AWARENESS BOOK Hey y'all. I'm helping out a wonderful human who wrote a book called ""10 Steps to Finding Happy."" She is on a mission to spread mental health awareness. If you could, check it out and please RT the link to her book pre-order: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0996430660/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_t1_.QZvEbP2GEDJ3. 

We are also holding a book launch in Long Island, NY! If you’d like the RSVP link, DM me! It’s free ✨✨",3.427456140350877,6.605781394736841,2.2510526315789465,90.20403508771929,90.31578947368422,3.5859649122807014,16.859649122807017,5.46131890053228,-0.5661982456140349,350,8,61,2,12,99,58,76,0.0,0.807,0.193,0.9272,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,6,0,4,2,0,1,0,14,7,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,4,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,7,4,7,4,0,6,0,0,0,0,12,4,0,3,2,30,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19556020352605072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24970479299423226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195246942825735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22350702000983844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26031957875648715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5198735662207689,0.0,0.0,0.16391139353619644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194709021871248,0.0,0.0,0.21641203499731093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4928817755161861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684337561924492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265195441411409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frogsarecool-iguess,2020/02/27,"vent // trigger warning: (



i feel like where i was a long time ago (when my mom abandoned my dad, sister, and i), i feel like i’m in a never ending loop of things fucking up.
i’ve been from SH (self-harm) since 2015 (maybe 2016? i really don’t remember) but i feel like i’m about to relapse.

my dad has been projecting his anger onto my sister and i, he’s been using us as his verbal punching bags along with our soon-to-be-stepmom and he constantly says that he’s a failure, loser, etc, and to top the icing on this shit cake, he’s saying that we might be homeless.

everything’s gone to bad, to worse, to fucked up.. i lost the two people who i loved that were close to me, lost my three furry best friends (couldn’t even get one of their ashes because my dad couldn’t afford it, and now i’m losing my childhood home.

idk what else to say except that i feel numb every single day and i don’t remember the last time i was genuinely happy.

i feel like life’s just not worth living.",2.8247058823529407,3.8136967647058815,4.11694117647059,89.76923529411766,74.0,6.812549019607843,22.423529411764704,7.0316486544052195,0.5464200000000003,756,18,166,7,15,249,129,204,0.23,0.632,0.13699999999999998,-0.9723,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,3,0,1,6,6,19,4,0,6,0,13,6,1,2,1,28,29,9,0,2,4,6,5,4,1,1,2,3,1,0,9,10,0,1,7,0,1,1,6,11,0,3,9,8,27,8,20,16,3,21,0,5,0,3,22,8,3,1,16,95,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069692796060456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075686371408428,0.07356110368630124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12663880475429892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304045774205495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782406275627941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080675628236624,0.0,0.1068804064990054,0.0,0.13458222565103092,0.07970333824335543,0.0,0.1016721558512596,0.0,0.10845305671059542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050793193604556,0.3448350874841763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323161347831273,0.2231203755721104,0.06304663013643005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845858767509255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104479708059478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983645514449072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523486567477655,0.2358188106563188,0.0,0.10655641613811698,0.10679175382982788,0.0,0.13500215201450652,0.2634575360844942,0.0,0.1089120390077493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123218696476053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801491869727813,0.0,0.14133068792482956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307040995633796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177110663736285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365942189636186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730617485421612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27339783264401857,0.0,0.0,0.28789189411010435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588819336838966,0.0,0.12386903796484106,0.09982190230016236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016973875526262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073072253897162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787992712766272,0.0,0.145154687782018,0.1042226746425454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229760344152402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anjagladidontxist,2020/02/27,"How do I stop myself I get so clingy and annoying when I’m depressed and I can see myself doing it and I don’t know how to stop. I can’t even ask anyone or tell them “Hey I recognize I’m behaving this way” because the go-to answer is “Oh you’re not being annoying! Don’t ever think that!” Or something along those lines. I know when it’s a genuine response and when it’s a knee-jerk reaction to someone being seemingly self-deprecating. I can’t imagine anyone wanting to be around someone so clingy and I can’t imagine why I do it. It’s every single time I get even slightly sad or burned out or generally not emotionally great. 

Does anyone have any answers for this? Or any solutions?

If anyone needs context, I used to have bipolar disorder and anxiety, but I no longer have mood swings or panic attacks and I no longer really get depressed as much as I get burned out and really tired and lethargic i.e., I still have physical symptoms of it but emotionally I feel mostly fine if a little overwhelmed from classes and stuff. If anyone needs more info let me know",2.317065919862131,4.773003293838865,4.088843171046964,82.83008509263252,80.04265402843602,6.869538991813876,25.70465316673848,8.00094639256281,1.8527232227488148,849,34,157,16,22,285,117,211,0.21600000000000005,0.767,0.017,-0.9890000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,0,12,11,3,2,4,0,18,3,0,3,1,49,36,30,0,6,13,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,11,14,0,2,11,0,0,0,9,8,0,0,0,2,21,2,13,32,4,13,0,4,1,0,4,4,0,11,8,107,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683419559500941,0.0,0.0946872364722372,0.0,0.0,0.43273041971466586,0.0,0.0,0.11018564302163887,0.11571255030503892,0.14081148548815425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545185231257864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21321377731465915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418564243042462,0.0,0.1083159937212987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27845954919297145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635039227144455,0.1119612193294967,0.10428544574731956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625841609070195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586684966634371,0.0,0.07034396221605843,0.0,0.0,0.1364619424819776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20406986301139432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265679228510416,0.0,0.0,0.12405467415335683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098857870176487,0.1835546072472517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452228339709108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15858636686107566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863233756747733,0.11267975463853605,0.1291239105714766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20974764769544896,0.09528774045773956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884656197928893,0.20696222939828615,0.0,0.0,0.14169231355134745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864921035078167,0.0,0.0,0.10818446313662636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930977112256532,0.0,0.0,0.07217396939920001,0.14226070412330202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690152078585097,0.0,0.0,0.07300547079449697,0.09824652274005806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168733197432867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DedKulak1917,2020/02/27,"Am I crazy /wrong for feeling this way? If this isn’t appropriate, please take down. I just don’t have any way of venting my mental health shit.

So, I’ve been passively and actively suicidal since probably the 3rd grade.

Lately I’ve been really distant with my wife. Romanticism is out of the window, we’re broke, and I haven’t been open about my suicidal/depressed feelings with her. The reason for the last part is this. Every single time I’ve attempted to explain why I’m depressed and why I’m suicidal it turns into an argument. It’s been that way consistently for months. 

For example, the other day I posted a meme on Facebook about how I’m depressed and tired. For the caption I put something along the lines of “my daughter and her well being are what keep me here fighting”. Apparently that equaled to her “I don’t love my partner enough to stay alive. Only your child is keeping you alive”. Am I wrong for not saying anything about my partner? Why is that what she got out of it?

Another issue that came from it was “you don’t even talk about it with me. I look like an asshole now to your family, friends, everyone!”

Well, yea. Whenever I tell her how I feel and get explained to why it’s wrong, it doesn’t necessarily foster a good relationship. I also don’t have a single friend I can talk to about how I feel, and bounce ideas off of. So yea I’ll tend to gravitate towards social media to vent.


All this to ask y’all, am I wrong or crazy for feeling like I can’t talk to her about my feelings? 

I also get it too. There’s two sides to every story. I’ve definitely alienated her early on, and I’m terribly lacking in being romantic, amongst other things that led to this.",3.4682690175205124,5.168374793413179,4.744025282767801,83.08326569084058,73.52095808383234,7.942160124196054,27.0410290530051,8.626192665926032,1.9793738301175439,1327,49,262,25,27,439,173,334,0.14400000000000002,0.732,0.124,-0.8959999999999999,1,0,1,0,2,0,40.0,0,5,0,1,21,19,2,0,12,2,26,4,1,5,1,39,50,17,2,2,4,2,6,2,4,0,2,1,1,3,23,17,0,2,10,0,0,3,9,10,2,1,7,8,37,9,44,41,7,26,0,3,1,1,31,11,1,2,9,176,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469233512153028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062469027248764124,0.09632488047684742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559425659138608,0.0,0.08587818072129777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506517999309024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059243122218449434,0.0,0.2373607433104187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491757251367126,0.0,0.06067370992384391,0.0,0.15479469310598032,0.08777768023916467,0.0,0.0,0.08659892600790668,0.0,0.2786878622843603,0.06562593402831053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419440639899838,0.0,0.09598777247934233,0.0,0.0,0.0770491383908878,0.0734701005117375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764456824574633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103700547006536,0.0,0.09587962740056442,0.0,0.16330159344705936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487945163520003,0.1036238680618572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975785975652131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714059470398588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829086661564197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257487068699548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332304000956014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986487414153644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994771437228468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083643381423577,0.0,0.0,0.0879780046704747,0.0,0.0990423246001547,0.0,0.0,0.09234626434966546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058848883017991925,0.09444900796917276,0.0,0.0986249630739159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305201872193291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429459598137876,0.07598885163020447,0.0,0.0,0.09364131657711994,0.0,0.07071953538299572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979122260666635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20096332651086166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690684789200645,0.22150458490840166,0.08029107345738966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061028754643318375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05356522841384477,0.10558137752589128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991902477140016,0.08973541964516046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21874634893624972,0.0,0.0,0.1651891924583091,0.0,0.3315631659413283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4017448861149797,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chip_pip,2020/02/27,"""Clicking"" with your therapist? How long should I wait before I decide to try someone else? I've recently started seeing a new therapist and have only had two, hour-long sessions. After our first session, I felt that it was a pretty good match, but now after the second one, I'm not getting that same feeling. Honestly not sure how long to give it and was hoping anyone could provide their insight, thanks :)",6.291599999999999,7.470870959999999,6.3080000000000025,76.55400000000003,66.06666666666666,8.133333333333333,32.33333333333333,8.238735603445708,2.6459333333333337,322,13,52,4,5,102,59,75,0.028999999999999998,0.713,0.258,0.9599,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,1,1,1,3,5,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,2,1,18,16,5,0,3,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,4,4,6,5,5,10,1,9,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,1,9,37,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282413379240148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15606450868409913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643430845598762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321169896597686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273529386794803,0.0,0.17609797032698876,0.0,0.0,0.15600456126906218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582176506329768,0.1759391962585404,0.0,0.15383176932895412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821629704965442,0.18061739994434428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4869240905042313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17713410285517364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428026291358765,0.13948809068588222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18658925321180547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810907315223816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14615037857249205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15539882188439347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298153041776291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17285744305456185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885507453842552,0.0,0.42589567004077705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452024489130033,0.0,0.1791604508990041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,earthangel25,2020/02/27,I don’t know what to love for anymore I’ve been trying really hard to change who I am and to understand myself better but I just don’t know what I want from life anymore. I feel like it’s all meaningless and there’s really no point in me being here. I’ve tried expressing this to one of my friends and they didn’t respond and I don’t know who to turn to or who to tell or even if that would make a difference. I don’t want to be here anymore and idk what to do.,2.5721914008321782,2.9676892427184502,4.239833564493761,90.8728155339806,74.04854368932037,8.215811373092926,23.45214979195561,8.418075326091056,1.0201800277392503,364,9,89,6,7,123,61,103,0.099,0.753,0.147,0.5878,0,0,0,0,0,2,4.0,0,0,1,1,5,4,0,0,1,0,11,2,0,1,1,20,21,9,0,4,5,0,2,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,2,11,4,13,16,1,2,0,0,0,1,9,2,0,3,1,62,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5531710278128091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16443796321576062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966868795660636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942548995828697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280350861946655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940106440970206,0.1328268036555164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364729886762584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16655472137883648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3065430451483477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132625047162438,0.09083489470241804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16780703061915758,0.0,0.12410819997074488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598943808482016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17576179696627725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23822012275224005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250902645918344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524654408712861,0.20223597395255424,0.0,0.19355731847653587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21932997846511335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320777210796865,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tcplewd,2020/02/27,"Homicidal Thoughts I have Homicidal thoughts every day, i'm at near breaking point and have been pushed to my limit so many times i feel like the resistance that holds me back from doing something horrific is starting to grow weaker. I've been rejected and cast aside by this god awful society so many times and it'll soon be the last straw. I always put my hand out to help the people who needed it and it was never because i was forced to, it was because i wanted to help and that was who i was. Did they ever thank me or show some gratitude? no. they just stabbed me in the back and took me for everything i had multiple times. I try to pick myself back up after those events but honestly im getting tired of it. I'm sick of being walked all over by everyone who comes in walking distance with me and i am going to do something about it. I will show everyone what happens when you crush a person's dreams over and over again. I feel like i needed to vent and i couldn't hide it for much longer.",2.5384455391351963,4.457872108374385,3.5728653530377663,89.53386836343735,76.6847290640394,6.875643130815544,23.59304871373837,7.793537801064563,1.1100040503557749,790,25,164,12,18,254,125,203,0.107,0.763,0.13,0.4413,0,1,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,2,1,12,5,0,0,5,1,20,3,1,1,3,30,36,14,0,4,3,0,3,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,15,12,0,2,4,3,0,8,3,1,0,0,12,3,24,4,27,19,3,35,0,1,0,0,9,10,0,2,18,116,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146288219257807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.336737261285916,0.0,0.17796999319093953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125744524959659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414178978261814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204273209339076,0.12299022158313835,0.2789707095521001,0.13119290492589228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761867799269496,0.20856911837969214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762659053073835,0.0,0.08296094855797566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908519806004073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19568791223584386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767803435005126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898909663953262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263200938968526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959914483168204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10730841083212724,0.2164772050037066,0.112584908301831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012006753511102,0.12745972728716926,0.0,0.0,0.1379935450873301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14674517952581714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22475735188302032,0.0,0.0,0.10332184644397037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13439415478218236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23177566669360075,0.2553575647684398,0.1677767726581148,0.0,0.0,0.1621835806000339,0.0991074334673218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860998288443074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thehighschooler24,2020/02/27,"Help I'm addicted to escaping reality So I have an account on discord and using that I have read 20 + comics within 3 days. I'm going crazy like I need more and more comics to read. I have spent over 10 hours a day for the past 3 days reading comics. Skipping school , skipping meals,  not studying. And desperately wanting to escape my world and go into the the world of the comic I'm reading. I tend to do this alot from tv shows, movies, and now webcomics. I cant stop watching/reading things to a extreme level just to escape reality and my responsibilities. For example after binging one show I'll look for another and another  same with comics its non stop. And I'm losing motivation, distancing and fighting with family, and I really feel like I'm forgetting that I'm in the real world,and even hoping and imagining a fantasy world (im going crazy). I recently got my acceptance to my #1 choice university I was so happy but for some reason it still  made me want to escape reality. I'm trying my best to stop .... actually I dont even know if I'm trying . But it's so hard to stop cause when I try doing something productive I cant stop think about comics i can read  and shows i can watch. I feel like ( I know ) I lose motivation easily 1 min I'm ready to accomplise anything the next I feel like there is no point of doing anything. Please help and give me advise on this addiction I have.",2.766690647482012,4.804066863309352,4.876296402877699,79.90791223021584,76.41007194244605,8.332892086330935,25.50848920863309,9.065960079200117,2.212573352517985,1100,40,214,27,25,380,146,278,0.055999999999999994,0.726,0.218,0.9892,0,0,1,0,2,1,32.0,0,0,0,5,11,11,1,0,11,0,14,3,0,6,0,49,43,20,0,5,5,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,16,1,5,11,16,2,3,5,3,0,1,4,6,26,8,28,39,6,31,0,2,2,0,5,11,0,4,21,121,34,9,0.0,0.0,0.08751270150481967,0.1955243122145718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880702103028846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759455360289175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411143121090668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212391389639056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735044943653161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051018396779717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846282423341555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454035004084748,0.0,0.13603153362146891,0.1921977450622558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602722039233539,0.15289806434375036,0.0,0.0717236148428843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546380006420824,0.0803337905641035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021842210664133,0.0,0.0,0.0890703967250163,0.08831467462696475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686752888238873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856926533999777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752483831506361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07530685632335304,0.20065327949498515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485540437674173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649503209027198,0.0,0.0,0.0953734719764954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06076807098955704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560770995445932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098439412640613,0.08477460902800639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5382130535599685,0.10207309170242898,0.05744996386444427,0.09220382472174804,0.08854611481112151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075883004268412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903843444269381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161689275357905,0.3748737308123145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059578016933282366,0.05746198207668327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18265623769526826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774529189079831,0.0,0.0,0.10578870660993828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MHSCanada,2020/02/27,"What are some resources that would help someone with a mental illness? Hey Everyone, I recently started a Not-for-Profit around Mental Health Support and was wondering what you think could help people with a mental illness and what you guys wish you had when you needed it. My plan was to make a website where therapists would monitor the forms answering questions and helping people out. Btw this isn't a promotional post, I'm just asking what you guys think would help people with a mental illness.",11.119666666666667,9.474198633333335,9.573888888888893,66.4975,57.111111111111114,12.111111111111116,41.388888888888886,10.686352973137794,4.552888888888889,407,17,63,7,4,125,59,90,0.086,0.746,0.16699999999999998,0.765,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,5,0,2,4,1,0,0,7,0,9,4,0,1,0,22,19,4,0,6,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,7,8,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,7,1,6,12,2,7,0,0,0,0,14,3,0,3,3,44,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261416208528812,0.1287644833693785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997091688945622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161256505932814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727604124780653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464068320775618,0.0,0.0,0.3692859099339121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193978981923956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5552216079510753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021294324165989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28646621339022943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319129285706095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429574214358566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13599759506962972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670319002670355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749018639978284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15630107903116328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15992200812595314,0.0,0.1765112198775221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583894996412264,0.0,0.14936871955504294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935309170240069,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rokbound_,2020/02/27,"Wandered into a weird place I looked from the third floor and thought how it would be to jump , was just a second or two but now I feel like shit.",3.4887096774193544,3.7233444838709713,3.3969354838709687,98.31540322580648,71.90322580645163,6.2,21.951612903225808,3.1291,-0.40017419354838735,113,2,28,0,2,34,29,31,0.187,0.716,0.09699999999999999,-0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,3,0,3,1,1,1,0,9,6,4,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,3,2,2,2,1,3,2,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,1,2,21,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20738797576573897,0.29301662808651924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003822558835712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34442903226336985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4285273310700037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4210208200514896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.325619271226092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4006643177529587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913641479809428,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garbagedumpv1r,2020/02/27,"Should i commit mass murder on the lgbt at a bar. Faggots gave me shit for years and i want to take it out on a club.

Can any of you help me fight this urge.",-1.360833333333332,0.34789458333333195,0.7033333333333367,106.05000000000004,89.27777777777777,3.6,11.777777777777779,3.1291,-2.0074222222222224,119,1,33,0,4,39,32,36,0.326,0.54,0.134,-0.8979,0,0,0,0,1,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,0,2,2,1,0,1,5,5,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,0,7,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,1,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3747272442443618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3693516283804068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5656363746233393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4143147718116198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250186649095876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35485278082017097
mentalhealth,AdditionalPush1,2020/02/27,"I analyze EVERYTHING.. and I talk too much about private things and, well, everything... I've always been very curious even as a child. I'm obsessed with processing information and identifying discrepancies. I am zoomed in on every nuance and detail of the world around me. It makes it hard to maintain relationships because I get carried away on sudden and random tangents that can be triggered by ANYTHING. I can talk for hours on end about why I like cats, conspiracy theories, dreams, ambitions, death and the afterlife, statistics, systems, politics, gold, science, literature, history, games, numerology, drug culture, personal experiences in high detail, and almost anything else that can be thought of. While I'm talking, I'll sometimes stutter because my mouth can't form words as quickly as I am thinking. It is very hard to unwind and relax because it can make me uncomfortable and anxious. I often reveal personal information too soon in a relationship and ask people I just met personal questions. I know that my disposition has repelled people in the past. People would just stop talking to me. A few people keep in touch and are able to talk to me without getting confused or annoyed. I often bring my problem up to people I just met in hopes to foster some understanding but to be honest I dont understand why I'm like this. I dont know why I am unable to filter out certain things that come to mind like  What happens to photons when they bounce off a surface? I just talk and talk and talk like I'm speaking automatically as a machine is automatic. I have many trains of thought going at the same time and I'll jump from train to train while I'm interacting with the world and get lost in my own mind.

On the plus side, I'm able to identify discrepancies easily so I usually know when someone is hiding something or lying to me. I'm also super-aware of my surroundings. I can move quickly and silently through crowds. I'm very tidy, so I know where everything and I rarely lose things. If I lose something, I know where I lost it as soon as i realize it's missing. 


I'm curious to see what people will say in response to this. I would like to see suggestions to help preserve new relationships, ideas about what may cause me to be like this, and how others might relate to what I've described.

Thanks for reading.",6.5562306169581,7.5706480138568155,7.03737627845596,72.15168302540418,65.39722863741339,9.973243154074565,35.556664467172546,10.041961382958581,3.7473029363246457,1862,87,318,41,28,609,220,433,0.079,0.795,0.126,0.9743,0,0,3,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,1,4,26,22,1,2,11,0,27,2,1,5,1,74,66,37,1,5,9,0,3,6,0,5,1,2,0,4,21,24,0,3,16,5,0,5,4,10,1,0,7,7,38,12,60,50,6,48,0,5,2,0,30,26,0,13,22,209,59,1,0.14025134190947988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022072982898976,0.0,0.0,0.05607947372679844,0.058350175884717664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922204770020276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541490420270108,0.06242671465532885,0.06555803607294326,0.0,0.0658853762579059,0.0,0.0,0.1282438743931914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203838107561092,0.0,0.060407056176250584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437352818042045,0.0,0.0813235148804525,0.0,0.05858099975312675,0.0,0.06211053006402077,0.0,0.0,0.04631734429465153,0.0,0.05908390227475632,0.0,0.1890732939742628,0.06859636225499771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991330623055902,0.0,0.03985403485030003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620118992316917,0.0,0.12563765417986536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04700375905525976,0.07409162153018507,0.0,0.06965061416136784,0.06905966014970995,0.0,0.0,0.07916334678189603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0623309184245237,0.0,0.0,0.1926961740599684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20555916386415327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15690537669282795,0.15310090737464668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361885979409604,0.0710964236888252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439225501508978,0.14161387416524818,0.0,0.0,0.07453249031894851,0.05155043691484845,0.0,0.0,0.06772780998880229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669428878113627,0.2916978635675905,0.1836930930133714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710079642495642,0.0,0.0,0.07855680048304581,0.0,0.07014464795721967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258661804169657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05576674818154475,0.0,0.0,0.1117621610994052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941725343354756,0.1079723350625297,0.06935608168300113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058628200937849165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4509148640017245,0.0,0.06456229613409821,0.0,0.0,0.13976513934468712,0.04493369839730855,0.0,0.11134389924921184,0.04089084266941622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600659315699888,0.0,0.0,0.07723351927647773,0.1735830680761251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305139994282905,0.0,0.18983253205884046,0.0,0.0,0.0675986443599656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09963052928491103,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MsChronic92,2020/02/27,"I went digging on my arm because I thought there was a tracking device put there by the government. Yeah, I'm embarrassed about it.
So I was taking a shower and I happened to look dow. At my arm, and there it was, the tracker I've been looking for. I went digging and digging, but, the more I tried to grab the more it would sink further in. I rushed my shower, ran to my mom and dad in tears and historically claiming that I couldn't get it out!! Help mom do you see it? It's right there! I promise! 
My mom is scared and worried about me and that just tipped it for her, to tell me we are going to go to the ER now. I begged her not to, eventually she caved. I've been going downhill for the past few years. I'm struggling with these horrible voices. They are ruining my life.",1.154045031055901,3.171333391304348,2.772884316770188,93.10479231366465,81.5465838509317,5.515683229813665,23.10597826086957,6.6274283507984215,0.4986922360248447,600,21,134,6,16,197,94,161,0.139,0.8109999999999999,0.049,-0.941,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,1,1,0,9,5,0,3,8,1,11,3,2,0,0,16,26,9,0,2,3,4,1,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,10,10,0,0,1,0,0,8,2,4,1,0,9,5,24,1,19,15,3,19,0,1,3,0,12,7,0,0,4,91,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051058608287988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008253004336568,0.0,0.29397141923822856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524707690222837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556974353127028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178561060718199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2895793812271417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6058099812862845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16459475861295095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333010065342702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14724605896921802,0.0,0.0,0.1726228753000334,0.0,0.1373967162878798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18025121341627895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963866473107907,0.0,0.15070300831277172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368825189584818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170621172968172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31967083181611017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510126125769332,0.0,0.12248248808999695,0.0,0.0,0.11103306908534187
mentalhealth,motherofcanines87,2020/02/27,"Do you ever feel like you’re faking? I’m about to start FMLA for 4 weeks from work for my depression/anxiety and while I know I legitimately struggle, sometimes I have thoughts like, “what if I’m just faking this and it’s really not that bad?”

Why do I do this? Do other people do this? Clearly my doctor feels I’m not faking anything since she’s helped me find medication that works and is backing me on FMLA. My mental health issues are very real...I have panic attacks, anxiety attacks, and my depression causes me to be irritable at times for inexplicable reasons, insomnia, etc etc etc.... I used to have some substance abuse problems with mainly alcohol but I was very promiscuous and engaged in tons of super risky behavior. Like, I KNOW I’m not faking anything. But why do I have these thoughts? Am I alone?",2.4448458781361992,5.193086348387098,4.2883333333333375,79.65472222222225,82.29032258064517,6.799283154121864,25.38530465949821,7.984000788550335,1.979358422939068,644,26,113,13,18,217,94,155,0.20800000000000002,0.6659999999999999,0.126,-0.8301,0,1,1,0,1,0,24.0,0,1,0,3,4,16,2,2,0,0,15,5,0,3,2,27,27,9,0,2,7,0,2,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,9,6,1,0,8,0,0,0,3,11,0,0,3,2,18,5,13,23,6,9,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,2,9,76,27,3,0.0,0.15101452138311944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13621170498968638,0.0,0.13200598002851394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19500698633309071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097708604551117,0.0,0.0,0.28999920632578485,0.0,0.09800579865005177,0.1064204383738354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309324240956263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977766832126662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304566194878344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42644140328994107,0.0,0.1152912513928155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12889116913071472,0.09105459376167584,0.0,0.0,0.11649247736397315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13547977070795156,0.0,0.0,0.08543107192056942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303095265985945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009297159048034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18680569453354695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283985136205797,0.12844567270170482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495421571825128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836194403168943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195818122904935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14507283468834267,0.08165157899649918,0.13104599849377122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543292248792477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605724566461726,0.0,0.09021401468970296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324468763720532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20237165826446016,0.07432062012054498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008106361296842,0.0,0.2103291009210624,0.0,0.0,0.1022375173000647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300184357612257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18557897584899605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samueljacksonferlyfe,2020/02/27,"Am I being bullied in grad school or is depression clouding my judgment?     ""Put your big girl panties on and get back to work.""

2nd-year political science masters female student here... I graduate in May with my degree and I am having major issues going on. The chair of my thesis (female) has constantly belittled me, does not support me at all, and doesn't foster a positive experience for me. I know she wants to see me crumble to pieces and has told the entire faculty during a meeting that the two graduate students defending will not perform well at all and talked badly about us. Mind you... she is the chair of the entire department... Another professor pulled me aside and mentioned her behavior to me and told me to watch my back and believes she doesn't have my best interest at heart. She even went as far as to tell me, ""Put your big girl panties on and get back to work."" She has also thrown my stuff in the trash before including textbooks. I am an extremely submissive person and I have never talked back to this woman nor defended myself...

My chair has even pitted administrators (females) against me and they play dirty tricks on me. As I was lied to and was sent an email telling me that the administrator who logs our graduate hours was going to be late by 30 minutes and to be there at 8 AM. I arrive in the office at 8:02 and she berated me for being ""late"" and set a trap for me to fall into. She then proceeded to send out an email with multiple people included to belittle me more. They are playing a game of attacking me and there is no way I can win. I absolutely can't stand life and I physically shake and get ill when I have to TA or even be in our research office. They scrutinize everything I do. I have a 3.9... it's not like I'm not a redeemable student.

I mention being female because I recognize that females play drastically different games than men. I am so close to graduation and have so much to lose but they know I can't stand up to them, complain, or do anything... As the department chair is the chair of my thesis... I'm truly SOL.

I desperately need advice so my mental health doesn't get worse and I get my degree... I can't take being treated less than human anymore.",4.559914279269115,5.8684162960372985,5.760476727573501,78.411087299797,70.18881118881119,9.078607414091287,29.92262576133544,9.454032385205345,2.7463847056169635,1737,69,327,38,31,580,219,429,0.10300000000000001,0.858,0.039,-0.9521,1,0,0,0,0,0,61.0,3,3,5,7,17,17,2,1,19,0,41,4,1,0,3,42,61,35,0,2,8,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,6,7,25,0,0,2,5,0,12,13,7,1,1,7,2,66,10,53,45,8,49,0,2,2,0,42,21,0,4,13,242,73,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826437538440874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886000893358263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161747665693399,0.0,0.0,0.10987560430649107,0.0,0.0,0.0911721361086758,0.0,0.0,0.12604156293767124,0.0,0.3407679405833988,0.09250644890442726,0.06753759722831551,0.0,0.09427558381979577,0.12482431596079213,0.1162690628656768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972647751610427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954247362685659,0.0,0.0,0.1157537546690925,0.0,0.0,0.0969545708040128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195306358773829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957244379496542,0.10837555026842566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894204749098763,0.0,0.12593096238142265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776640538308432,0.0,0.13128870812686727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091075156763141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563775918406842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177645118111433,0.0,0.24995574608560026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825546028103758,0.05412723251436465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394758249677396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165198377623273,0.0,0.11186804251550664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144465367501945,0.0821506480868717,0.08544939576098162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680902076299863,0.09673904651011724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22275253602731612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121271239856055,0.08828664749969313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268299996577254,0.0,0.12572511797295094,0.0,0.0,0.0833015766655066,0.1781003573073543,0.1936736733092752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117324508746043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822740063284082,0.0,0.1332687840170272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534782024377554,0.08794130135350435,0.0,0.0,0.0996150515765992,0.10270502384259754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613153667607128,0.0,0.11290621625921354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134622788660767
mentalhealth,xtylr,2020/02/27,I don’t know if there’s something wrong with me Hello I’ve only talked about my mental health on reddit once before but this time I honestly feel like I’m slowly falling into an abyss everything that’s happened I just don’t understand why it’s happened to me I don’t understand my unluckiness and I don’t even understand if I’m healthy or not. For the last 3 months it’s come around suddenly ever since I started thinking about previous events but I’ve felt an overwhelming amount of just sadness and anger and recently for the first time in 5 years I cried even though I’m 15 almost 16 I haven’t cried in a while and honestly I just feel lost and no sense of purpose I know should describe things in more detail but I’m struggle it’s hard even typing about this as it is and all In all i just feel. According to my family I just seen zoned out and withdrawn from everything and they suggested help which I declined even though it would probably help but the amount of times I’ve been told to keep it all inside don’t show weaknesses by my own dad and also to put on an act I’ve got no clue what I should do anymore I’m just a little lost that’s all. Sorry to be an inconvenience,3.696494331065757,4.896857073469391,4.697108843537419,85.6295181405896,72.14285714285714,8.383219954648528,26.26417233560091,8.841846274778883,1.8074716553287988,953,31,199,18,18,311,132,245,0.174,0.738,0.087,-0.9568,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,3,19,11,1,2,9,0,13,2,0,0,5,48,38,21,0,5,14,1,5,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,13,14,0,1,10,1,0,4,9,8,0,1,7,6,21,3,26,27,8,27,0,4,1,0,8,10,0,4,14,124,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569841665097005,0.0,0.0,0.09239873086781328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458641257993188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285669288731407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983175565856786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995290247076451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25383447043160845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052570607807434,0.10451416750911624,0.0,0.0,0.20768302842650108,0.0,0.10892252036806024,0.0,0.17526420797197811,0.08254308067537684,0.11093824155300007,0.0,0.0,0.09827979089878566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240932755566172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043464535928038,0.0,0.10350275264692214,0.0,0.0,0.12281552397782265,0.0,0.0,0.15489045791979594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269885527650773,0.0,0.0,0.12699749653831707,0.09418198321696956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05644788427647796,0.11580323144388048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522550337231133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164389525691596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222435758799387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304823966734148,0.0,0.08787474080219737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457359595401242,0.0,0.0,0.11615141576492925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408358244751718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557736592115187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894971783450077,0.0,0.12933957876716806,0.08178107643939624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078936983663065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286811732169084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676083384760768,0.07403451618206601,0.22703845181196075,0.0,0.2021200476225574,0.0,0.0,0.11040513554219546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3608492468678352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10425849765228473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207757535726642,0.1263268136161054,0.0,0.07440512710930955
mentalhealth,_dubujigae_,2020/02/27,"I need to strengthen my relationship with food. (vent) Hi, this is my first post here.

I'm trying to lose weight after a childhood full of unhealthy habits. It's been a rough journey, but I'm trying. But I feel like I need to take a step back because it's affecting my mental health. 

Just the whole ordeal makes me feel guilty about everything I eat, try to cover up myself, and just want to cry. But I can't for some reason. 

Today, there was a new boba shop in my town with a grand opening. I went, and when I was there in line to order, I automatically found myself scrutinizing the food info which made me feel sad and guilty and embarrassed while drinking it. It was good boba though. 

It's become too obsessive. I have a bad image of myself while looking at those around me. I already struggle with depression and some other issues. I need to become better, it's affecting my life. 

I compare myself too much with my friends. I feel the need to stop this weight journey. I just feel like everything is out of control.  I really need to stop this, otherwise, it'll bring me back to darker times.",3.151625676340384,5.229071658878507,4.1867437284800815,85.10663305459913,75.4018691588785,6.7482538121003435,22.94540088539105,7.669130373188453,1.0718915887850469,861,25,166,12,19,279,118,214,0.187,0.703,0.109,-0.9598,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,4,14,13,0,3,9,0,9,8,0,6,0,41,29,12,0,6,6,0,8,2,1,1,2,0,0,0,13,12,6,3,8,2,1,5,1,7,0,1,7,9,29,6,26,21,5,29,0,3,1,0,3,9,0,2,15,113,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113446209175667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977190061821293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16881345764961472,0.0916537715825522,0.06691507006169589,0.2424657574671507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970830754045406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311693521681005,0.0,0.0,0.12057772561537967,0.0,0.0,0.09454515966038612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753328726232912,0.0,0.11232261249912467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19730927146341926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775162824695493,0.15684011578412274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337072022078696,0.26546981736029385,0.12035767323034835,0.0848084060085686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207027652422152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116680894650177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457186922746038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753414131263278,0.10725663051648814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217956273056567,0.12280509682201385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386748899977333,0.07327265249735715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062283266692237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069393834653024,0.4069671263076892,0.0,0.10601702043009724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512978324255763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032178484748465,0.11286234295111293,0.0,0.11785242264929037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835460847659314,0.0,0.11475594680778425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253374516683458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784894620566972,0.0,0.06400805375818494,0.0,0.10404958661099048,0.0,0.0,0.22358086557835505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474547732589528,0.0,0.0,0.2673417618063456,0.0,0.10175834125224434,0.0,0.12255482867742752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Existing-Doughnut,2020/02/27,"Can anyone offer advice or help? I’ve been having a lot of issues for some years now, and I’m unable to get any help. My family doesn’t have the money and our health system is horrible. I’ve been having relapses of memorial for as long as i can remember, where certain months or even parts of a year just go. I forget almost the entirety of one year long relationship. I can recall maybe 10 memories from childhood. This is among a lot of other issues aha. I’m just getting so scared, I don’t want to forget. I’m 16 and a girl, in Canada.",1.5219410319410334,3.62115133333333,3.972481572481573,84.55488943488945,80.7117117117117,6.91924651924652,19.0999180999181,8.00094639256281,0.900668468468468,422,10,84,8,11,147,73,111,0.102,0.8140000000000001,0.084,-0.4548,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,6,0,12,1,0,0,1,16,19,8,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,6,1,14,17,4,13,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,6,8,56,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914611114914747,0.0,0.0,0.18357662438573305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466940404501918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12818727983408168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108649022633268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17282543000632414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19156274585411048,0.0,0.10418959193085756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19486921227305065,0.0,0.0,0.2457619407208903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3826938415572443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32447922361511355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31171801313508063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18417773139193694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463307514675892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242278745516269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19852648216598234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19682578570375245,0.207675015375597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18354342386801928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813167144944184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3541718841215599
mentalhealth,Cyan_Cyborg,2020/02/27,"I don't know if I was being groomed or not I don't know if I should post this here, or if there's another subreddit I should post this on (please let me know if there is!)

In 6th grade, I had a male art teacher that seemed to have taken a special liking to me. He would always give me extra attention, even more than others, even those who  needed his help with things more than me (it should be noted that I was a very good artist). And then he started doing things, like weird things. He'd call me pet names, like seniorita, and sometimes he'd get uncomfortably close to me, like, too close for comfort. And there was a time that he was taking a picture of one of my art pieces and I was standing in front of it, but instead of asking me to move out of the way, he put his arms on either side of my body and took the picture. That was weird. Then one day, while I was painting something, he came up behind me and kissed me on top of my head. It was uncomfortable... And there was also this time where he made me draw a flower, but blindfolded. I felt so vulnerable, but thankfully nothing happened while I was blindfolded.  I always felt uneasy around him, but these things he did to me made me feel even more uneasy around him. I almost forgot to mention that he'd almost always insist on hugging me. I don't know if he was trying to groom me or if I'm just being paranoid, but I do hope it's the latter. So, everyone who read this, do you think my art teacher was grooming me?",4.0430730897009965,4.639207617940201,4.78448338870432,87.56589451827246,70.82724252491695,7.481794019933556,25.016777408637875,7.365786028017652,0.9687021926910306,1147,30,246,11,20,370,147,301,0.059000000000000004,0.8340000000000001,0.107,0.9081,1,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,0,1,17,13,0,0,9,0,33,5,3,2,0,53,58,28,0,12,17,0,3,4,0,4,0,0,1,1,22,14,0,1,10,5,0,5,4,2,0,2,22,3,42,11,29,25,6,32,0,0,0,2,25,15,0,13,12,181,64,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308948696902205,0.0,0.0,0.09219829251261684,0.2877944224614411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12089282517702647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20526713665086527,0.10778166385533552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806247921969993,0.0,0.0,0.11772515640288662,0.13186236384846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435325516980726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284461554591158,0.0,0.0,0.1101656363243439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05829467050692825,0.0,0.2213951717620796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06023486839553625,0.1105977783361538,0.0,0.09670074825339638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195158486115193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832198333691868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727722887846025,0.0,0.0,0.11451012770586165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534440078178296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178930140217033,0.0,0.22530173292906086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21818255108285986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253624878145775,0.0,0.08548692827730324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062496965769213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15624853655779586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265550634917142,0.0,0.0,0.22083410818470225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589945127893465,0.0,0.0,0.11532235131271948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495673464750786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887567613407212,0.1140258972059962,0.0,0.08160367070780497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668459806013949,0.0,0.0,0.1061446028052376,0.0,0.0,0.3063772736324209,0.07387391487821772,0.0,0.0,0.13445439562749129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12809271186103804,0.07827512422311136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512727457516704,0.0,0.09151275000861672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818995264376697,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayacc36964,2020/02/27,"Motivation advice Any tips or advice on motivation for studying? 

For context I'm eighteen and should be in year 13 (Senior year) , but am resitting year 12 (Junior year). 

Last year I was homeless for the majority of it, in a mostly dark place mentally, has no motivation for school - missing most of my classes / not paying attention. Etc.

I can feel myself slipping back into that and really don't want too, I've had the odd days off here and there or skipped a lesson or two and not its progressing too pretty much all the time. 

I skipped one day this week, and am defo gonn skip tommorow as I have outstanding work to complete and also have a horrible cold. 

Does anyone have any advice or tips?",5.456969696969699,6.592171969696974,6.310303030303036,75.9437878787879,67.93939393939394,9.2,30.57575757575757,9.444778638647367,2.825448484848485,548,21,98,11,9,181,94,132,0.105,0.779,0.11599999999999999,0.3837,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,0,6,0,12,0,0,3,1,25,16,13,0,2,7,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,6,0,1,0,4,1,0,2,2,2,6,0,13,12,6,18,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,6,12,68,10,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4844694275288738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215807572012706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22476444663195147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555338391911395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270744635592657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17327159007283066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21315759454926195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461982607220636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18430818485215253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356024031443117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347086648545714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16654284929975965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148485163017088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198421013457734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726611518015832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681284674707605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058695581553904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16725158014008595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963642260284283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143465672606153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747441837431638,0.0,0.13256131622299686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203109873533827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5321089548592045
mentalhealth,AlexCoinman,2020/02/27,"A long while ago, I received an answer to a question/situation that shocked me to the core. I'd like to understand my reaction to it, as it was the only time it ever happened to me. First off, I managed to get over the situation completely. It took me a very long time, but in the end, I did it. It still causes me the occasional melancholy when I drink one too many glasses of wine, but nothing worse.

Anyway, I was very anxious about receiving an answer to an issue, an answer that was very important to me. In my mind, I was ready for 3 scenarios: the good one, the bad one and the very bad one. What happened, was none of the 3. It was an answer that I never saw coming, something that in my perception, my view of the world, literally did not exist. It was the extremely bad option that I didn't even know was possible.

In any case, upon hearing it, I froze in place for 30-60 seconds, then everything around me literally started spinning and I felt more and more detached from reality and I swear that at some point, for a 5-10 second time period all I saw around me was complete whiteness, as if literally all matter around me had disappeared. When I finally was able to ""see"" again my body was almost completely paralysed. I could not feel anything that was under my knees and my stomach felt like it had imploded. For a good 10 minutes the reality around me would change suddenly, I'd see in much darker or much lighter tones of color and complete/partial body paralysis was still present. Very unplesant feelings in my knees/stomach/lower neck area stuck around for around 24-48 hours. It felt like a nuclear detonation had taken place in my brain...quite literally. It was something I did not even think about, it was not even possible as far as I thought and when I saw it happen right in front of my eyes, it was a catastrophe.

I've done a bit of a reasearch, I'm tempted to believe it was just a very intense panic attack/state of shock, but I figured I'd ask in a place like this since I've always been interested in what possibly could have happened in my mind/brain at that time. Again, over the course of several years, I have managed to cope with it and find a way to get over it. Still, the way I reacted has always sparked my interest. Since I am also studying psychology, finding out what was behind that particualr answer of my mind and body interests me in particular.",6.5650173697270455,6.329799120430106,7.169086021505375,75.51824441687346,65.32258064516128,10.594706368899917,34.87386269644334,10.214889679676881,3.444684036393713,1881,79,361,40,26,622,212,465,0.09699999999999999,0.816,0.08800000000000001,-0.8064,1,0,4,0,0,0,64.0,0,0,0,1,24,15,0,1,31,0,34,9,7,2,4,61,62,24,0,4,10,0,6,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,31,18,2,0,18,2,0,6,7,6,0,7,37,16,44,9,63,22,9,72,0,0,9,0,4,36,0,5,32,255,75,2,0.06564003852682943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058185933660739424,0.0,0.06572901690069914,0.0,0.0,0.05249231509481276,0.10923554073634872,0.0,0.0,0.044637477091075635,0.0,0.0,0.07415455984117239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05401615881383278,0.3506013047111274,0.061364575268714826,0.0746750199279041,0.0,0.0,0.1644200711509849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395384557765759,0.0,0.0,0.07166192145036956,0.2187338559476085,0.0,0.1465519829200905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674304009478273,0.0694384572028779,0.05654308102464475,0.20646699462415974,0.0,0.0,0.1048164591702534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717254914755386,0.0,0.06430224833263434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058137591139134075,0.0,0.0,0.13006387914307085,0.059375172810643716,0.0,0.0,0.058993034133796925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637915148329279,0.0,0.18907419215515725,0.07190545374640607,0.11998761208791825,0.05583338323869188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858842187517482,0.0,0.0,0.11011150009154058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321810771588761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398109399242657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464221577006256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685111464046086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0360740485390365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12827362887117685,0.0,0.0,0.11617873704938354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654869645477292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19883318112150253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650596191370417,0.0,0.0506256442919079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298338728812168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779175555333156,0.04992220715307223,0.0,0.07701444227485807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20573960847150166,0.0,0.0620510531433005,0.22199784252594085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353186557857871,0.0698162607653314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056056234250835085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10461322452289226,0.0,0.0,0.07415455984117239,0.0,0.10859623634967053,0.07378215351396065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106581708017354,0.0,0.0,0.04646035711671405,0.0,0.1572606586746611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04205948625940251,0.0,0.05211085852684932,0.15310093731280466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292849801354556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833359502672053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3249594369935069,0.0,0.10420401458059053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689280704421577,0.04662880006474955,0.0,0.0,0.0422700327180793
mentalhealth,eemaraa,2020/02/27,body dysmorphia? Im honestly not sure about if I have body dysmorphia or not. Part of me feels like I do cause thinking about how I look takes up more time in my head than it should. I hate my body a lot and I constantly think about it. I hate self diagnosing so I want to talk to my therapist about it. But I just really don’t know if I’m being self aware of my body or if it’s body dysmorphia.,-0.26162790697674154,1.8168856279069807,2.1709767441860457,94.81530232558138,88.06976744186045,7.1609302325581385,17.902325581395353,8.238735603445708,0.6796641860465118,308,8,76,8,10,105,53,86,0.11199999999999999,0.8009999999999999,0.087,-0.4803,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,2,0,1,0,5,7,6,2,1,20,15,9,0,5,9,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,13,3,11,13,3,4,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,6,3,49,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7511633369122553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893938302107195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461575978212542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13727627519475066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06838664921840526,0.09662288898922317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670634722773283,0.13880589595795326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14609360510704775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433006443138211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660764974059135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357624434618305,0.0,0.0,0.11498502516284274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14646296707565615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664484818660644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28219125893784663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274718699850749,0.0,0.10169144363673292,0.10870912155437217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570361001507697,0.0,0.1733259476118518,0.0,0.0,0.07886557647287093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977417049124039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BaileyMarinus,2020/02/27,"What do i do I feel like i have no use to this world and the only reason that is keeping me here is family, if there was a way to wnd it with out hurting them i woukd take it.
Nothing seems to work for me",-1.0968085106382972,0.5677142127659636,1.6334468085106373,100.09400000000002,87.72340425531915,4.611063829787233,15.782978723404256,5.6839178017228535,-0.9162987234042552,156,3,41,1,5,54,38,47,0.106,0.841,0.054000000000000006,-0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,2,0,9,11,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,7,1,6,10,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,2,1,31,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029082660105493,0.0,0.16246709786954108,0.2295483188789579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34397557987347305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856005541182585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697883861275352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30831150799720564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24437540806598304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33036651317992755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925141514955042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415897534774593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775139841807741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550458006310158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339219811189004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,omen_darkening,2020/02/27,"I love you all To everyone out there struggling, there's always someone who cares about you. ALWAYS. Be it a friend, parent, or just some stranger on Reddit. WE CARE ABOUT YOU. So if you need to open up or vent or get some help, please, PLEASE just ask. We love you for who you are.

Have a fantastic day!",0.9177985948477776,3.263037360655741,1.542997658079628,99.52114754098362,85.22950819672131,4.797189695550352,16.911007025761126,6.1826913282559595,-0.5615779859484782,233,5,53,2,7,71,43,61,0.035,0.586,0.38,0.9811,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,2,6,0,0,7,6,0,1,2,0,3,2,0,0,1,14,10,5,0,2,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,5,8,9,3,5,0,0,0,2,16,4,0,6,1,37,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3538265703403764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19876696779602546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43355172916091933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711952986458875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031634018649039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16426635356597086,0.0,0.11108292188403343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251181429586576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3837879199934561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576518390241451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360845607763026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4667763574933209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18014858295348574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22227208149886307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,86u3w0q7r9m,2020/02/28,"Is it possible to see a Doctor/Psychologist only to get diagnosed without getting help? Only diagnose
No help",5.630526315789473,8.936671263157898,8.609736842105267,50.25565789473686,73.21052631578947,12.221052631578946,41.078947368421055,11.20814326018867,7.16182105263158,90,6,10,4,2,33,16,19,0.324,0.6759999999999999,0.0,-0.6923,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5585968113108113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28165485897862164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28753677958463125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688900817550978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4185683321501452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102202138956485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21928008298557855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652603743369232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shawna234,2020/02/28,"I found out my sister's been self-harming again and I can't handle it. My family has just started taking her to therapy and she's not happy about it. It took a very long time to convince her to get proper help. Even then, I can't stop panicking. I don't think she's suicidal at all, just depressed and angry and needing an outlet, but I can't stop worrying every second of the day and it's driving me insane. She's refusing to see her therapist next week because she ""doesn't need it right now"" and she'll ""tell me when she does"" but I feel like she's definitely not at the point of asking for help by herself. I was hoping she'd stick with therapy and learn to get better but she's been very dismissive and nonchalant about it. I don't even know why I'm on this site right now I guess I just need to get it out.",2.2000743187448397,3.5908871618497145,4.0304417836498825,88.17573699421969,76.22543352601156,7.4862097440132125,22.761767134599506,8.192908349453996,1.1057963666391415,641,18,141,11,14,217,97,173,0.077,0.74,0.183,0.9449,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,11,6,0,0,4,0,12,0,0,0,1,33,30,13,1,4,8,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,11,0,3,5,0,0,2,8,1,0,1,5,2,27,5,18,23,1,24,0,1,1,0,19,9,0,2,14,92,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302845932756474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674291284820296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258501073239129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176977444423737,0.0,0.1225601727246022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452503835835925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18797161479353147,0.0,0.11989133539519042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414492027538513,0.0,0.07194962414899488,0.101656984607657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15602128414431493,0.0,0.0,0.223032882973818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675615640223522,0.0,0.0,0.1514777717694691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19075732051424013,0.0,0.0,0.14133299970725385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820269394584076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951911239654646,0.0,0.0,0.12592834162563776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31653420316389164,0.0,0.0,0.15133444312085326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451663216374427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430416716954109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339226273976975,0.0,0.14844677470500595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007185285644098,0.0,0.0,0.23793327900278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15564979068339932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069896132133121,0.0,0.1243738247606355,0.0,0.3254579755826539,0.16521775102019362,0.0,0.09117815340033356,0.0,0.0,0.08297450818791849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809717071017407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348198074535153,0.0,0.0,0.11414204701962155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840088356694188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445094814420169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OverKoala3,2020/02/28,"Are you born with anxiety disorders? If not, what factors causes it to develop?",3.265000000000001,6.4317712142857175,5.682857142857145,66.7871428571429,86.85714285714286,11.371428571428574,35.57142857142857,10.125756701596842,6.045400000000001,63,4,9,3,2,22,14,14,0.13699999999999998,0.863,0.0,-0.264,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,8,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4450946877784169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5976947546214654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6668220896231767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,peeweekhaleesi,2020/02/28,"At the end of my rope I just need someone to talk to my boyfriend and family have had it with me and my ""problems"" I've pretty much been a recluse since the end of August 2019 when I hurt my ears. I ended up getting pretty bad ringing and ear pain which hasn't stopped and hearing loss. From this I became scared of any and all noises. I hide in my bedroom all day because it furthest from the street. I never see my family and my boyfriend refuses to spend time with me as all I do is make up problems. I cry all the time, I've lost over 40 pounds i now weigh 99 pounds i have zero appitate. I have lost a lot of hair i now have wrinkles and from lack of hygiene now have gingivitis and a cracked tooth from me now clenching my teeth while I sleep from stress. I went to have my teeth looked at was told were doing x-rays so i still had my ear muffs on the dentist put the scrape tool in and started moving and since i had ear muffs on it made that screeching noise 100x louder i made him stop after 15 seconds because of that my ear is now muffled feels like i've lost more hearing and now have an even louder ear ring. I haven't stopped crying all day and Im just ready for it to all be over. I need help but the metal health clinic in town is literally next to a train track and i just cant do it. And there also booked until April except for walk in hours which your not guaranteed to be seen and i cant be in a waiting room that long with other people.",2.7250612072604445,3.765675300970877,3.5880765442521465,93.26665681722248,74.3074433656958,6.280061910792178,23.46714506824258,6.280692351149826,0.3488037427888,1144,31,261,7,23,365,162,309,0.08800000000000001,0.8640000000000001,0.048,-0.8204,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,4,15,12,0,2,13,0,26,17,11,3,7,46,45,22,0,5,6,0,2,1,0,0,5,10,2,0,12,18,1,5,1,1,1,4,6,11,0,2,14,15,37,1,40,28,10,48,0,5,3,0,8,16,0,1,29,174,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743922806428074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435500858613049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129440550011056,0.13330540434505625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402099026922556,0.14103062126068674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905285896539739,0.0,0.0,0.07221809624751373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061522059956511,0.0,0.05528563328534388,0.0781125799945028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05712568260782579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11622339949987155,0.2464684492716543,0.0,0.07328835552084266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767796080416152,0.0,0.1170508245507571,0.0,0.11810605680484652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0534180435233276,0.0,0.0,0.09676253625633112,0.09181813506896826,0.0,0.3580728633973305,0.0929570319223663,0.0,0.2069204680896892,0.07298535710707017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162112085956159,0.08037754477101589,0.16214857812320174,0.08432981569103487,0.0,0.11628442295258473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11634556160916601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580264911961193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22247635388406206,0.0,0.20924739310072685,0.0,0.1099169873619618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946850161172007,0.0,0.08712989302410204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808944996986753,0.0,0.10941905109551146,0.0,0.0926435008866075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739147634351028,0.0,0.08731913471242281,0.2742396259517681,0.12524870022812176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788342019555148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751416802983004,0.0,0.0,0.10447913878765944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135935607334592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the-air-bender,2020/02/28,"What are some tips to stop worrying about everything I figure this is a common issue so some people must have some tips on how to fight this damn thing lol

just how do i try and prevent very minuscule issues flaring up alot of anxiety

like for example; i have a friend who talks a certain way, with alot of hand movements and a specific voice etc. We (my group of friends 12th grade) copy his form of talking as a joke. Sometimes i do catch myself talking like him on my own. So now im scared ill talk like him forever and im thinking about taking a break from them and am having anxiety about it lol. I do want to break the habit, but like you get the point.

Another example: everytime im excited for something im scared ill die the day before, and have anxiety about it

just dumb shit like that. Whats a good remedy?",3.327972027972028,4.852949060606067,4.449696969696972,85.76685314685317,73.54545454545455,8.470862470862473,26.631701631701628,9.057496981413335,2.0610932400932405,645,23,133,14,13,211,104,165,0.20199999999999999,0.619,0.179,-0.857,0,0,1,0,1,0,14.0,1,1,1,0,11,17,4,2,12,2,11,4,2,2,2,24,15,11,1,2,3,0,1,5,2,1,2,1,0,0,9,7,0,2,2,1,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,2,14,11,19,14,8,13,0,0,0,0,15,4,3,5,9,84,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12848542584947611,0.2812098027181095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426565847295824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902296633235502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12716881139359598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665550614930738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012380934058676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18933575020570065,0.0,0.06401788282683248,0.0,0.0,0.10277398018539892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5294220995189368,0.25578302710298484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993145897784466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494822097124535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158322918302089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453517013536039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577727851823098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433107598555816,0.12118722462584247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244219085123946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212877174504328,0.3939461369852839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140477819014459,0.07851352136404109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08319114599646482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110168544570534,0.07227251459416661,0.09726015285271186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443713582011175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WhereIsMyCuddlyBear,2020/02/28,"mental health and immune system Hi folks,

I get sick a lot. Sometimes 6 times a year, sometimes 10. It's usually the flu or a cold and lasts 5 to 20 days.

Various GPs have told me over the years that my immune system should be fine, after checking my blood and other samples. I still get sick a lot. I eat lots of veggies, dress according to temperature and weather, and wash my hands regularly. So that's not it.

A while ago my psychiatrist told me, that me getting sick all the time could be, because I have been handling a lot of stress over a period of years, and that that stress might have affected my immune system. What she could not tell me is, what I could do to make this better again.

I've been battling mental illness for lots of years now, and am on medication for a year now. Also going to therapy.

While pills and therapy are helping my well being in general and I've learned to navigate my illness and stress better, my immune system still sucks.

Does anyone have any suggestions that could help me? I'm literally sick of being sick all the time.",4.083532608695652,5.687306178743963,5.074948671497587,81.72082880434785,71.7536231884058,8.073550724637682,26.46407004830918,8.660442795831766,1.917183816425121,837,28,160,15,16,274,111,207,0.17300000000000001,0.72,0.10800000000000001,-0.9408,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,8,9,2,3,12,0,20,19,2,2,2,30,29,15,0,5,3,0,1,0,0,2,16,0,0,0,12,10,1,0,1,0,1,1,2,5,1,0,4,3,19,4,17,15,8,30,0,0,0,0,8,4,1,7,21,111,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203659478450424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830306163316174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060609210445576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725984290685828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632921294488588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836535348504356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33159045055964664,0.0,0.0,0.06695998846362901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085992836318108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624119983396804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16273636239578398,0.0,0.05900742030931121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036351425170267,0.0,0.0,0.13918643756444776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463306844578197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4413510859907085,0.0,0.0,0.06930549729153852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459503373687504,0.20926690022737304,0.11014430724320552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20537561520423867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658331559694478,0.0,0.35680130091140977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907495950772986,0.0,0.2374710237917449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18162751771001645,0.0,0.0,0.198422778411506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435105005133755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335316917074923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343067325760398
mentalhealth,Grand_North,2020/02/28,"Welcome to your Anxiety Attack - A Depression Short Film Through my crippling anxiety and depression, I decided to make a film exploring the very viscareal and disorienting world of living with severe mental illness. 

https://vimeo.com/394256123",15.041714285714285,17.11561731428572,11.800714285714287,41.62678571428575,47.28571428571429,17.285714285714292,54.64285714285714,15.247664890283005,10.069000000000004,206,13,19,9,2,61,29,35,0.41600000000000004,0.519,0.065,-0.9349,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,5,1,0,3,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46555407904267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34616788855322184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5241601056021914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686890536008889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20311246714653095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066475103590236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437552133443757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25106682769796235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway_zlt,2020/02/28,"Am I good? Or should I be concerned? I am 17, a senior in high school, I am described by everyone as a nice person that cares about others, everyone likes me and thinks im a pretty cool guy, also they know not to fuck with me lol. I have a job(recently got promoted lol), i have my own car, i have plans after high school, such as going to college, getting a well paying job, traveling, of course buying everything for my little sister (i love her to the moon and back) that i couldn’t have as a little kid, i’m a pretty smart guy, i like helping people and whenever i get the chance to i do, however, i think i might have some issues.

I love fantasizing about violence, beating people’s faces in, curb-stomping people, stabbing people, shooting people, not random people or classmates but particular people are whom i have a negative perception about, which i think could be justifiable, at least in my head. This really gets me going, i mean it really makes the pistons in my brain just pump pump pump, if that makes sense. Sometimes i feel like i would do it if i could get away with it and thats what i don’t like.

These sort of fantasies happen every now and then, and sometimes cause my mood swings which i struggle to keep inside and not show to the people around me (i smoke a lot of weed which helped me turn into a better version of me, more productive and more responsible, and has made me emotionally numb). When I go sober my mood swings come back, my mood can last a day or two or three, or change a couple times a day, it swings from super-hyperactivity to a very calm and bored state, and if im alone and not surrounded by peers that turns into a sad/worthless feeling. However people describe me as cold and not displaying emotions, i get “youre shallow” and “you have cold eyes” all the time. They only see the hyperactive side when i choose to show it/when its too much to keep inside.

Im also a little weak on the empathy side, I have trouble understanding emotional situations regarding other people, and i have trouble actually FEELING bad for other people’s grief, not that its not there. I can easily manipulate people but this is NOT part of my everyday routine, I do it when i have to to get out of a sticky situation. However, i dont use people for my benefit, nor will i feel right if i cause harm to someone by trying to get whats best for me, if anything, i am a very helpful and selfless person sometimes. I am a fantastic liar though, that, i do a lot, i like being honest too, i dont have anything to hide, but its pretty fun not gonna lie, creating entire stories that never existed and fascinating people with them. Ive been lying since i was a kid and ive always been pretty damn good at it. I lie way less then i used to, im more honest now.

I usually get anxious at public places, i hate going to the store because i feel like everyones looking at me and everyones criticizing me in their head, or talking about me. Sometimes i feel like im going to get approached by someone and get socked in the head. A complete stranger, i know it sounds insane.

Feel free to ask questions if you have any to help you answer my question lol, am i normal or is something wrong with me, and please dont judge.

p.s. talking to a therapist is not an option lol. at least not until im 18 and on my own.",4.791827695560251,5.425680407575762,6.004228329809731,79.35320295983088,69.16666666666667,8.866807610993659,28.53065539112051,8.973190933345348,2.2034164904862577,2599,87,508,45,43,873,297,660,0.11800000000000001,0.7,0.18100000000000002,0.9891,5,1,2,1,0,0,86.0,0,4,4,5,21,41,4,1,33,5,48,11,6,8,2,103,99,52,1,12,28,1,7,7,0,5,2,1,0,6,30,31,0,2,19,4,4,9,19,14,1,2,5,14,84,25,67,83,16,59,0,1,3,3,29,28,2,22,27,347,114,7,0.0,0.0,0.04728617684468466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050185919930627015,0.0,0.0775006728317598,0.040319368125205424,0.0,0.0,0.032951818774063606,0.0,0.0,0.05474161570939907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975050527487439,0.04313621425937437,0.04529992497730902,0.0,0.04552611366002623,0.07451952044484994,0.0404588307140168,0.029538397003163887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05085170155671883,0.04285549459850236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409304800436378,0.0,0.0,0.049404237088646094,0.09955555271915162,0.05126014297428266,0.04174065113603378,0.05080531303176401,0.0,0.0,0.07737652735323976,0.05361576787774966,0.0,0.0625003689965628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703706122284622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351981683581804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04082636547310707,0.18520757175426528,0.04354923029683669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17150606831043572,0.10385117138296683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04479689606921538,0.25316319323092346,0.0,0.13769362971405108,0.08128537794718138,0.03875478047279675,0.0,0.0,0.09595834114125452,0.04284958109133246,0.0,0.0,0.047840380127556925,0.14918985595331824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991644572669284,0.1023930885614119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140455057935538,0.050575593143891116,0.09617043138795232,0.08614004010907296,0.0,0.0,0.053260425425914686,0.03949819980962144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571246591744035,0.14569726665129584,0.0,0.0,0.04069093131043629,0.0,0.0,0.08239130968917736,0.08746706847559346,0.04585034616220657,0.06468966398589318,0.0,0.0,0.052782912938879295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05140427890986257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03562081881452089,0.0,0.037372341914025435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047476702969829435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03685305779161492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05247324884799736,0.0,0.470307150174821,0.08462001844286368,0.05062632519282133,0.053190261465697684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971891506463901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108563873523603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06208445412613029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041381256122991684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808034751112517,0.03861324878213121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04008339777401038,0.10893340348925107,0.0,0.0,0.08211341535315826,0.037303883482074834,0.191697340869962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050656850723715424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778943770055289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056261282465169926,0.0,0.09314616277185207,0.047607885435354505,0.0,0.056510298847954464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03289852028686194,0.10541267381151637,0.04733458188786467,0.05044452299368268,0.0,0.08370104813683996,0.05336756313238528,0.07996273665499963,0.0,0.03846220740683395,0.0,0.0,0.04356786533303834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034421832718069666,0.052979153284836586,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnAverageCitizenMan,2020/02/28,"Left by everyone I don't have any friends that care about me, I am not mean, I'm just not special. It kind of breaks me knowing nobody likes me, with this in mind. The only real person I trusted in was my mum. Then when she was drunk with her friend, my mum told her friend that she hated me (Not realising I was across the room). I am fine a lot of the day because I am normally playing games which distracts me. But then suddenly I can just feel really depressed. I started cutting myself 2 years ago but I didn't like blood so basically stopped immediately. Then in the space of those 2 years I have tried  swallowing sleeping pills in the bath in hopes of drowning. But then I can suddenly feel happy again and really think I was overreacting  the next morning.",4.9727999999999986,5.824512680000005,5.678666666666667,81.06600000000002,68.86666666666667,8.933333333333334,30.333333333333336,9.120678840339163,2.4247333333333336,602,23,120,11,10,196,94,150,0.12,0.7390000000000001,0.141,0.6523,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,0,6,17,2,1,7,0,13,5,2,0,0,22,24,10,1,2,8,2,2,2,3,0,1,0,2,1,6,3,2,1,5,4,0,0,5,4,0,0,6,2,24,13,14,18,1,25,0,1,0,0,12,9,0,2,17,81,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15505419382631094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118950192758825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662834854137393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783404905535185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280759630619355,0.0,0.15065655954439866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714158110374142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17688752543058778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4054234838332687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18620339246355225,0.0,0.17269524565082425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.173732975506081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821501103177291,0.09613032158055146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19004884621088514,0.0,0.0,0.17091213341838962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487089716712942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19053690819014246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17661724902146314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18602720634530048,0.0,0.17138243592975005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303297029282973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15273159235988173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990949023761049,0.2241138140587957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750442568266556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380781340757915,0.0,0.0,0.14623922445109586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208034870979132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714158110374142,0.0,0.11875779471943718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22528282812572414
mentalhealth,yesyesgirl19,2020/02/28,"I'm starting to hate people and I don't know why I am aware of introverts, and I classify myself as one. Just some more info: I usually have a tight knit relationships: I only have 1 bestfriend that I'm trying to maintain friends with, my cousin and my sister who I live with (we're uni students, so we're roommates) and a boyfriend who lives in the next city. I was never a social butterfly and I was never eager to make new friends, but wasn't opposed to the idea. 2 months ago I stopped taking my medications without talking about it with my doctor, it was the fourth type of medication they put me in (different dose) and I could tell it wasn't doing anything for me except give me bad breath. 

Recently I noticed that I hate being around people, and I mean HATE. I work at a convenience store, so I can;t avoid the small talk but god I hate being with people. I don't like being at home anymore because just the presence of my cousin or my sister makes me unjustifiably angry. I don't want to be in the same room as my sister and I don't want to be seated at the same dinner table with my cousin. I dread thinking of meeting up with my bestfriend, even though I know I'll have a good time. I'm also considering of breaking up with my boyfriends but I there's no appropriate reason to do so. I love him and I adore the times we spend together. This has been going on for 3 weeks, although might have been longer and I just didn't notice. 

So my question is; is this normal? Has anyone had similar experiences? If so, how do you deal with it? 

I'd also gladly accept any coping advice. I'm scared that it's not a mental illness but just me being an asshole.",2.863303571428574,4.570510627976193,4.366785714285714,85.1282142857143,75.16071428571428,6.704761904761906,24.5,7.447530270364453,1.1339892857142853,1305,42,261,16,28,435,181,336,0.149,0.757,0.094,-0.9584,1,1,0,0,0,0,35.0,1,1,1,1,17,17,4,3,15,0,33,8,1,4,2,59,54,28,0,5,13,6,1,1,2,1,5,0,2,0,12,20,1,4,9,0,2,2,12,8,0,1,9,1,46,9,37,37,4,28,0,0,0,1,24,12,0,5,14,184,58,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037703657765039,0.09413350140757568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984467227681738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221473899659339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531471324999653,0.07425246817221251,0.0,0.0873876183096233,0.09453409765939004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886665443310756,0.06473413939870921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478630217029297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094801040208891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094886401335356,0.0,0.10869282077627897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07013933654925114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387692583689898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16408857292323573,0.0,0.0,0.10186980096989098,0.060351810013718074,0.08906947432770286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4193735815430736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652002722959257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198787345616802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672156087503405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051880433397802406,0.0,0.18754035897904198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584313940409557,0.0,0.14176902442166806,0.0,0.0,0.11567508025873448,0.0,0.21395612861490296,0.10701735593997144,0.11265376913597405,0.0,0.0,0.08476207218084889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638048531109942,0.10256165872396283,0.11293723735050128,0.0,0.10404638775458463,0.0,0.2418023914853853,0.0,0.0,0.07195898308463679,0.08076440235045787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22086212988929205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675308502508246,0.11896022864050475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10918387494365728,0.1048525693533825,0.11401131537665175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631750869991964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825017666731596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516380363582005,0.0,0.0,0.08878192779571284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984376254558771,0.1707074848683027,0.0928171794702696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680440522289466,0.10433387742469287,0.0,0.12384374015605427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209793402238021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695635585137562,0.0,0.12527051830883934,0.0,0.08518145103050086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582247612880393,0.0,0.0,0.1023660604734686,0.0,0.07730961618119102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sav_mats,2020/02/28,"I don’t know if this is anxiety or just a part of going through a break up I keep having moments of really intense negative self talk, not pertaining to the break up, Making reasons why people would be upset with me, how i’m failing, thinking everyones hates me, or that I’m too needy or problematic. It happens when i wake up and throughout the day if I’m not distracted. I went through a beak up about a month-2 months ago and I’m not sure if this is just part of the process or not. My chest will get really tight and ill start crying really hard. I don’t know how to make it stop its been going on for a couple weeks now nearly every day.",3.8781370091896403,4.567008676691732,5.256040100250626,83.70021720969092,71.25563909774436,8.617878028404345,27.559732664995824,8.841846274778883,1.956897076023392,506,17,106,9,9,170,84,133,0.23,0.7440000000000001,0.026000000000000002,-0.978,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,8,5,1,2,8,0,9,3,2,5,1,30,26,13,0,4,13,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,6,4,0,3,4,0,0,3,7,4,0,0,2,2,8,1,16,21,2,21,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,7,10,71,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087736938570065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302071414099245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18832972662980527,0.1869633235602448,0.21953760756020832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434059149608786,0.16263914860727904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892562181077075,0.0,0.1934640100788296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051262366571966,0.0,0.15247116437415742,0.16804320944972947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512869333757555,0.0,0.0,0.18708155749108032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272276835056411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27171364674847104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3686330720266413,0.0,0.11799942512970035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3271150093437461,0.1750001389995101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17756200211960266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047269883751748,0.0,0.0,0.1422998562096443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041716198916575,0.0,0.0,0.1368051536713901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090611466601674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365290046557702,0.0,0.0,0.15778268816566993,0.15358446153767022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090947500131248,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PogothePenguin,2020/02/28,"I let my mom in on my health issues today I have issues with depression and anxiety. Lately, I have just been full of panic and anxiety trying to balance a practicum, part-time job, and graduate classes.  Today I finally broke down and told my mom about my anxiety lately and I think I really need to find someone to talk to. We talked about how to find someone, going to the school counseling center, and it feels like a small amount of weight is off my shoulders!",6.892134831460672,6.7831164157303405,7.2621123595505574,74.70058426966294,64.61797752808988,10.715505617977527,32.406741573033706,10.355215969177356,3.3100364044943817,367,13,66,8,5,120,58,89,0.168,0.805,0.027999999999999997,-0.8932,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,3,0,5,3,1,1,0,15,10,7,0,1,1,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,2,12,1,15,7,2,13,0,2,0,0,6,7,0,0,6,45,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33538973706776964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587003165549232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389269505669388,0.10440233222679816,0.0,0.1600890535014962,0.2671383358319965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305463992452122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533981809290398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.305064053163406,0.14502124330115565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3297042140490637,0.0,0.0,0.14943788958177426,0.0,0.0713965449255484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34231443307513354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836084100994237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714636168378796,0.0,0.15825520751362282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362092482173157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790132199879732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24764762753702285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349233384207506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364050979740142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770469648051949,0.1396428815850996,0.0,0.09921935975357787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17795895708608708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iwannalickthesky,2020/02/28,"i feel so lonely but all i want is to be left alone. i miss affection, but i hate physical contact. i miss being in love, but i cant even spend one day with someone without feeling extremely exhausted. i miss hugs and hand holding and cuddles, but every time someone touches me i want to rip my skin off. i miss caring about someone, but i cant remember the last time i felt empathetic towards another person. 

i miss the version of me that wasnt a cold, unaffectionate, antisocial mess.",3.685851063829787,5.700946468085108,5.562712765957446,76.10875000000001,73.68085106382978,8.529787234042553,33.026595744680854,9.188382445141503,3.3015148936170213,384,20,69,9,8,132,64,94,0.205,0.509,0.28600000000000003,0.937,0,3,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,12,1,0,3,0,6,6,2,1,1,18,19,8,0,2,6,0,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,4,0,1,0,4,9,0,1,2,7,15,3,9,15,2,8,0,6,0,3,3,4,0,0,4,45,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21596050102272102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186480270850404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21259675640214984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13447607437764075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772336809664826,0.0,0.17568438228683808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21086470065114346,0.0,0.20020881074227448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058671530928643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16996900788453512,0.0,0.0,0.2265540940086197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18819453700449296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14129636809819138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18206881137910844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362088663532046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5300267787718511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431756251358501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459772012897718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20100273713441327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kathrynmccallum,2020/02/28,"Does this have a name? For quite a number of years I’ve had days where I’ve gotten caught up in my head~ obsessing over a single symptom of throwing up etc such as too much saliva in my mouth and that becomes the only thought whirring about in my head until it escalates and i ultimately am sick. 
It’s beginning to happen more frequently, and is impacting my ability to go to college, volunteer and any other plans I have had. 
It’s all in my head and sometimes I can escalate it from absolutely nothing, which is so annoying. 
Another similar example was being taught about the heart and its functions, I became too aware and panicked thinking about everything that was going on internally~ went white as a sheet and could no longer stand. In my mind I was telling those functions to stop.",7.923708053691275,7.629580523489933,7.90864932885906,71.5346518456376,62.55704697986578,11.74530201342282,38.08808724832215,11.20814326018867,4.3833281879194645,634,29,112,16,8,205,101,149,0.11199999999999999,0.862,0.026000000000000002,-0.9135,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,8,2,1,1,6,0,13,7,5,0,1,15,23,12,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,11,8,0,1,2,0,0,5,1,2,0,0,10,1,11,0,23,11,5,22,0,0,1,0,2,10,0,0,6,83,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491540827643208,0.1926148413361434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028710258709086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666141149316764,0.0,0.0,0.11846476766827815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16074824011875713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048627574733336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650886077018463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20879036863765132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243634238213558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5655563929533182,0.0,0.0,0.21767337634365147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854744011630829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13503318757200025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17625538113804665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970442092555918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953767839531153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18167397499713692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357295355859896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909241049827484,0.0,0.0,0.1605530398599452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770104944037388,0.0,0.1458292357167786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702823466407345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829025157635273
mentalhealth,WasteEscape,2020/02/28,"i just need a place to vent ive not been coping well and its all been exposed today. my friend made me speak to the safeguarder at my school and then everything collapsed.ive been self harming and not eating at all for quite a long time. i told her everything and she called my mam in to school to talk to her. the only thing i can remember from this is her coming over seeing me crying, hugging me and pointing to the 'sh addict' on my sg sheet and whispering itll be okay. all i dd was stare at the small crack on the wall while she told my mam all me secrets it felt like hours had past until they set me up with another councilor again and another safeguarder at school. my parents keep handing me random foods but they don't know i shove it all in the bin. the thought of food fucking disgusts me. the stress of school has been too much and i wasnt confident enough to tell the safeguard i am currently suicidal. im worried for myself and im slowly physically breaking down. thank you so much for reading",3.211275480489228,5.053932346534655,3.764909726266749,89.23381770529996,74.54455445544555,6.733139196272568,25.74373907979033,7.510576382923642,1.228808619685498,802,28,163,10,17,252,126,202,0.13,0.805,0.065,-0.9417,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,2,1,5,10,2,1,11,1,15,7,1,1,5,29,27,14,1,1,4,1,2,1,1,1,1,2,0,3,6,11,3,1,5,1,0,1,4,4,1,0,12,6,30,6,26,13,8,28,0,0,2,2,20,15,1,1,11,113,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282031058243598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24663106905508794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200843852222211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10130336775248752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12917983865472346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033579905294894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215138926997542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21138547540719646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129159811911088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28440865009919825,0.0,0.09085870668764537,0.10872078688662494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581388983094308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540598233661007,0.0,0.0,0.1045297081368508,0.0,0.0,0.06463076541369031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745420289716414,0.0,0.0,0.10407371787189584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127748016463304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729014191106851,0.08720009843592237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894413183469659,0.0,0.0,0.13058266282413716,0.0,0.11226403687975438,0.0,0.0,0.1228686448194379,0.0,0.11117152695066478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12508378056603026,0.11763342757750082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321969103870107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4760764023939181,0.09371325159126914,0.0,0.12268411979544665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13471223880316927,0.0,0.0,0.12863706607493175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452371375239407,0.1027889844469429,0.10827175568917964,0.0,0.0,0.07812927940460855,0.0,0.0,0.09336253648686688,0.06857444038594919,0.0,0.1114725687675768,0.2247467425798085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057379644040458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943013627639573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Quacking_on_through,2020/02/28,I don’t know what I want I know I don’t want to be sad and miserable all the time but I can’t stomach the feeling of being happy constantly it just eats at me for some reason and I can’t seem to just fit into that middle ground that should be there.,0.7391071428571436,2.241950410714285,2.8958571428571425,94.24914285714287,80.60714285714286,5.908571428571428,18.34285714285714,6.742157984588678,-0.12932428571428595,197,4,47,2,5,67,38,56,0.075,0.703,0.223,0.802,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,8,2,1,1,1,16,14,3,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,5,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,7,1,6,10,2,7,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,2,2,35,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722092789433417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3524405377449261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174155471726235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666549076604089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3785822988094243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3541340782218049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31355850328049434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20084141905724132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4063105431325019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PigeonWanderer,2020/02/28,"Giving up is about the only option I have left. A bit of context, I am an 18 year old dude who lives with his Dad and Stepmom. I've been struggling with depression for a really long time now (I believe since I was eight, I can't quite remember ) it's always put a damper on the things I tried to enjoy. I have a very big problem expressing happiness/gratefulness, I don't know why. And I always seem to stay out of people's way, I don't like causing conflict and I always try to be the middle man. This makes it very easy for people to take advantage of me. As of recently I ended up landing in a mental health care facility for suicidal thinking because I felt I can't work anymore. I'd much rather end my life then spend countless hours a week slaving away at something I dislike. (You can call me lazy or unproductive, I don't really care.) But I recently resigned from my position at work, and now spend my days at home. (I worked full time as a behavioral specialist at a school.) My parents are very avid on me getting another job right away and I can't handle that. I'm very exausted with being forced to keep living each day, nevermind working again. Some other things that are stressing me out are
 A: My girlfriend of two years has been making me feel like things aren't okay between us. I really give my all to check up on her regularly each day, asking how things are, making sure she's feeling alright. When she hasn't asked me how my day was or texted me first in what seems to be months. We live quite a ways away from each other and it's a long distance thing, so communication is everything. And it hurts to think that I can give somebody my all and feel as if it's not reciprocated. 

B: My friends are all worried about me. If it were up to me, I'd cut myself off from everybody and just die. I feel like I cause so much stress in everyone's lives it's selfish of me to feel the way I do. I have such a hard time even texting people that I often times leave people's messages unread for a long time. I've told people so many times to just cut me off because I'm bad news, but nobody listens and it just makes me feel terrible. 

C: I have a very hard time taking care of myself. I don't care enough about my well-being anymore to even want to clean my room, or brush my teeth, hell even just trying to get out of bed feels like a chore. I just want to die, I don't have a hobby besides guitar playing and I'm so self destructive I can't pick up anything else because I beat myself up over things and quit. I'm so fucking tired of being myself. 

I'm trying therapy, I'm trying meds, I'm trying to get out but nothing is right. Everything I do seems to upset someone in some way and I can't ever do things conventionally. Nothing is helping. The only things I can think of to do now is either kill myself or take off in hopes that things change. I don't have the money to go anywhere and I'm so exhausted I don't want to keep carrying on. I'm sorry for dropping a bombshell on you Reddit, I just need help. Thank you for listening.",3.047326555023925,4.337592489633174,4.484917264752792,86.1736916866029,73.86443381180223,7.394059011164273,25.343201754385966,7.937092434478242,1.3382685007974482,2389,77,501,34,48,796,277,627,0.146,0.7759999999999999,0.078,-0.9907,2,0,1,0,0,4,63.0,2,3,0,10,29,35,6,4,24,2,48,6,1,9,5,87,104,36,4,9,18,2,10,4,2,0,4,2,5,2,27,25,0,3,16,2,4,2,15,18,0,3,7,13,76,17,80,93,14,79,2,3,0,1,29,39,2,14,36,322,103,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149614623014258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05523713934999287,0.0,0.0,0.1044842050553183,0.0,0.0,0.043349241283524416,0.0,0.09849303756502203,0.0,0.14847724003359242,0.0,0.04398366151101342,0.09633547231371087,0.0,0.0,0.05934970509175511,0.0,0.0,0.05751038193033296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05378979984712685,0.0,0.21483361757798355,0.1082289738745216,0.055725999436901694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589097983031315,0.0,0.04537120762413634,0.0,0.10934222787493936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044005441246451164,0.0,0.09331357583641513,0.054430123907196634,0.0,0.1043793302421993,0.047649976394849115,0.0,0.05033577961568565,0.09468660218979752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18644792057812848,0.11289883293755636,0.050578832681468115,0.0,0.0,0.044807606739147264,0.0,0.0,0.040698644024809334,0.048699665281473487,0.08256573906070792,0.15159968885187428,0.029937938861230962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437770663958188,0.0,0.0,0.05599390932290418,0.0,0.0,0.07061747550179623,0.0,0.05284000698523105,0.052320821122444516,0.05187690257976076,0.0,0.056392544739439526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05227446798246685,0.09364468275129824,0.0582800468257624,0.0,0.028950274668397964,0.0,0.0,0.05577805587035032,0.057234452228550274,0.0,0.037207802452191886,0.1029426121804486,0.0,0.18606142217943966,0.1398542643987252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065103878699006,0.05340689828879893,0.0,0.0,0.05851302589550517,0.0,0.05308671038189591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04204682070222415,0.0,0.07744831028644811,0.039059831408039467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109130720740048,0.0,0.055276362638053064,0.0,0.0,0.08012749706039532,0.0,0.0,0.0584923284057037,0.0,0.0,0.18260034896174948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504054244057331,0.0,0.052955616940109335,0.0,0.16808758711595598,0.0,0.0,0.1012400099257088,0.0,0.10402570560952616,0.0,0.05967354126356302,0.08997289986354706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331262334674137,0.0,0.14386734123274492,0.05495430763963193,0.0,0.0,0.04357552032003219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044633626363741206,0.04055385079513504,0.0,0.058968348713467136,0.0,0.056147396690642684,0.0,0.0,0.12068420633992573,0.055070147508586485,0.0,0.057620830754037226,0.0,0.04964808892327787,0.0,0.11882117608388787,0.0,0.0,0.04849852923709102,0.06024151669675125,0.0,0.31497038222225343,0.1012611887715169,0.0,0.0,0.21501744721548235,0.060545242665145486,0.0,0.05033577961568565,0.0,0.21458811660751784,0.0,0.05145843789301365,0.0,0.06336476165294404,0.0,0.0,0.21732300961612688,0.09321197949304967,0.16725235818172,0.042254856523481536,0.0,0.04736355964192235,0.0,0.04753341169426117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533999104312955,0.0534967399311268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784539617760624
mentalhealth,Intentions_aregood,2020/02/28,"Same thing. Please help. I posted yesterday about my relationship issues.
Anyone know why I’m interested in people only when they aren’t attracted to me or are seemingly unattracted to me?",4.675000000000002,8.0521636969697,5.8638636363636385,67.71579545454549,78.6969696969697,9.36060606060606,26.431818181818183,9.516144504307137,3.6144,154,6,22,5,4,51,29,33,0.0,0.7120000000000001,0.28800000000000003,0.8591,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,4,5,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,2,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364093146277055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266231565355093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3528914448917793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858124375390752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571423883406119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343978862010982,0.0,0.0,0.3711353057076071,0.0,0.0,0.32380898871407965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36299583827280996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30779605908083923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22462045368669967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30508515696745225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,qtmcjingleshine,2020/02/28,"Looking for a new therapist and the process has been so laborious I'm ready to give up... I've been out of therapy for a while and feel like it's time to get back on the wagon. I went and looked through a bunch of therapists and reached out to nearly 10 therapists. None were available to take new clients or didn't accept my insurance. Some offered other suggestions for me which was great! 

​

Well... I reached out to all of them and none of them are taking new clients either. I'm talking like 25 therapists I've been rejected from... Like I'm on the verge of just checking out before I even begin... Every time I've done therapy in the past, it's taken time for me to find someone I have a connection with in the first place. 

​

For those of you suffering from mental health issues and have struggled to get matched with a therapist... what do you do? Like I'm here looking for help and asking for help and nobody can help me... it's kinda feeding into my rejection issues and need for therapy in the first place and it's been really frustrating. I'm finally at the point where I'm asking and actively seeking help and it's nowhere to be found...",3.915084910237749,5.572695707423581,4.727125181950509,83.8311147501213,72.2751091703057,8.407666181465308,29.31610868510432,8.998388855275968,2.439535468219312,923,38,180,19,18,298,119,229,0.075,0.7859999999999999,0.14,0.9077,0,1,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,2,2,7,12,1,1,12,0,16,2,0,0,1,30,38,15,0,1,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,19,1,0,4,0,1,1,3,5,1,2,11,4,13,7,40,26,6,32,0,3,3,0,14,18,0,3,17,119,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19158259802213728,0.2148536373992854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16530127961526433,0.0,0.0,0.06798119473718657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752296922256626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047327615718732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583934231325039,0.0,0.0744885389779948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044702332868414116,0.06315952887982135,0.0,0.09684792458473136,0.08080437992628282,0.15040159007359022,0.0,0.09693609189581874,0.0,0.0,0.09238028498616736,0.08481013201888224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747142229425564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397481375906096,0.0,0.0,0.23703521288883475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18455240860054112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276901942568534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22272430973300172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890956495366401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555427949963412,0.0,0.2561583825718593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439655669403381,0.0,0.0,0.1847375319227071,0.0,0.08357524223989597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05663717829778486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490880304026867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242446041692116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294538671724715,0.07105994215386355,0.0,0.0,0.3033107732928837,0.5132493038866441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465629439265535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949046155445275,0.0819561865400569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148536373992854,0.0
mentalhealth,lilcatfriend,2020/02/28,"One of my friends turned out to be a ""modern nazi"" and it really screwed with my social anxiety Last night me and my friend were joking around and that led up to him mentioning why ""mix marriages are bad"" at first I thought he was joking, but nope and it eventually led up to him saying that the nazis weren't wrong and we need segregation for racial purity. I eventually just told him that he was a horrible person for believing those things (I kinda feel bad about that) and just ended up saying good night. We weren't even that close but today everytime I think about it I start to have anxiety attacks (small ones) and I dont know why. I'm not sure if it just scared me that people like that still exist or I feel bad for bashing him for his beliefs (I'm not saying hes right, it is horrible). I'm honestly lost here. Any advice?",4.029890219560876,5.170063640718563,4.958458083832337,84.30000249500999,71.27544910179641,8.680439121756487,24.695109780439118,9.075114841892004,1.6931241516966065,656,18,136,13,12,214,101,167,0.18600000000000005,0.701,0.113,-0.9409,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,2,0,0,2,9,16,2,1,3,0,11,1,0,2,1,33,24,11,0,2,9,0,2,1,2,0,0,3,0,1,14,13,0,0,6,2,0,2,6,8,0,3,8,5,20,8,18,15,0,20,1,1,0,1,20,9,1,3,10,88,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792211375851976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598125025772196,0.0,0.2159461505306056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564610786396208,0.0,0.16056915047139875,0.0,0.0,0.3535424720428537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901845315825916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16541711481828034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500972384978226,0.0,0.0,0.0932228144529032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427310494590418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005512584042526,0.0,0.0,0.21809157799380124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838302851408596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756783103063669,0.11504938852239464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068954744289368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407292557580765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465484135980473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649039983708235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19128264561237326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784993874245736,0.1232395580751726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041903831548834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053430880865308,0.0,0.33672482506538554,0.1413075440151615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438762701564067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09990087823252036,0.0,0.11271600771066426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302445716684985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09376832696643822,0.09043795347434704,0.0,0.11205080751327344,0.0,0.0,0.13378590402525012,0.1348670191473846,0.0,0.0,0.15352172659741573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547170062351725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15431637946117027,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,0nefullm00n,2020/02/28,Understanding Your Depression Video Hey guys I recently made a video on understanding your depression. Feel free to check it out in my last post,5.156266666666667,8.636813159999999,5.124000000000001,73.16866666666667,77.4,11.333333333333336,28.333333333333336,10.504223727775694,4.366333333333333,119,5,20,5,3,37,21,25,0.24100000000000002,0.6509999999999999,0.107,-0.6249,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,2,4,3,0,6,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,10,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4974706605515668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14602144504261352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2859485685481085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354032710749457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27326109844309515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765820212329239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28514634717582577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6012833890032429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GynyBeats,2020/02/28,"Am I Depressed? For the past few months I've been dealing with a lie of heavy stuff. Issues with my marriage, failed my college semester, and struggling to find a job, all in the span of 4 months. Now whenever I go searching for a job I get this feeling like ""what's the point?"" Especially if it's a job pertaining to my main passion of illustration and cartoons. I wish i could just do my freelance work fulltime, but unfortunately Im not in a place where that is possible yet. A lot of jobs that I see are for things that I learned in college, but not enough to turn into a job. I just get this feeling of sadness, hopelessness, and sinking into myself when I look for jobs. 

Believe me, I'd love to go to a therapist right now. But I can't afford it right now. I have to save and budget my money as much as possible until I can find work. I just want to know if these things that I'm feeling are what depression looks like, and how I can get through it.",4.064615384615383,4.690756794871795,5.1461538461538465,84.88384615384619,70.7948717948718,8.256410256410257,30.384615384615394,8.384062270229773,2.053615384615385,745,30,159,11,13,246,108,195,0.12,0.741,0.139,-0.2553,7,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,0,3,10,11,0,1,11,0,11,2,0,1,1,33,28,15,0,5,10,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,15,9,0,0,7,0,2,2,3,6,0,0,1,6,21,5,27,26,6,22,0,5,3,2,3,11,0,3,11,113,36,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195974354362775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642815244902738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160013915276147,0.18646969980894032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185032752069696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642020958134959,0.07733322735219487,0.0,0.0,0.19787555717150995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696671676087724,0.0,0.12304099372004346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692767724741923,0.11298400752685585,0.6445235775812044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05949091185233025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577015135819748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18180407598475856,0.0,0.0,0.09202957173023213,0.0976991005808118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17280690651251587,0.0,0.07957559389570333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333607964335692,0.0,0.0,0.11309734105083205,0.0,0.10233045312055083,0.2440693446948309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848883962653268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.086260571944743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316553395966235,0.1239193991397734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568562752057652,0.14383187463105912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774401041092815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06384816401132375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244812011077229,0.0,0.0,0.15761336730226888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AbDLTyrant,2020/02/28,"Why do people like to be Assholes? Does it hurt most people to show a little sympathy and understanding? Lately I can't stand that most people seem to have no sympathy or understanding for people being in a bad situation

So I'm gonna give up on being Social, all it ever leads to is ""what did you expect"" ""why would you do that"" and so on

Like I dont realize I've made a mistake after making a mistake.",2.48736660929432,4.160663554216871,5.241514629948366,78.60240963855424,76.10843373493975,7.634423407917385,22.70051635111876,8.418075326091056,1.5094419965576598,317,9,61,6,7,114,56,83,0.201,0.691,0.10800000000000001,-0.8544,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,1,3,6,0,0,4,0,11,0,0,3,2,18,19,5,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,0,4,2,10,12,3,10,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,4,5,44,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448522416816785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16191356151030012,0.0,0.21684382006178948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673625394539501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748948216632665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19806934248310204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20871231099817705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18078431823111474,0.1854401499177692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17507181695695,0.12350328798259012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5130824469532269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843662470175585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20797191812575327,0.0,0.18860611896919316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3852278133206422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339062510394694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13143396509202335,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AndyRobboIsMyDad,2020/02/28,"Panic attack or other problem? A few weeks ago in school, we were talking  about abortions, I suddenly started to feel extremely lightheaded and as if I were going to pass out. My vision became blurry and my ears started ringing. I almost felt as if I were in slow motion and I was struggling to move. These have happened before and they only happen if I’m talking about gore, sex education or gross stuff about the human body in an enclosed area. I can talk about the exact same stuff at home and be fine. Is this a panic attack? Why does it only happen in enclosed areas? Recently, a YouTuber I like mentioned how he dealt with the same fear (?) and it caused him to have seizures so I know it can’t just be me.",2.8578085224128387,5.078347575539571,4.030359712230215,85.21108467072496,76.84172661870504,5.715771997786387,24.36137244050913,6.67199483983844,0.9821063641394576,559,19,102,5,13,182,93,139,0.182,0.7759999999999999,0.042,-0.9668,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,1,0,7,10,2,4,7,0,11,3,2,2,1,27,21,15,0,4,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,8,9,0,2,3,0,0,4,1,8,0,0,5,4,14,2,17,14,3,21,0,0,0,1,9,10,0,6,8,74,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12590259175539845,0.0,0.14222429822272006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231632787101925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085857259874153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776527438760085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14590574917878266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429295645301675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15982522507744376,0.07181552898161883,0.0,0.13637276989309385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071992631992979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3767946675218543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424694428819156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805694470172783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06938954706353867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15095729076327416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21604311802811801,0.0,0.33328735228472184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590521922751606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402392350906551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14374373093679932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20106163145827693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148482441290482,0.3251847848671275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34247926278510504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392931627806765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816157810597814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Catwoman0417,2020/02/28,"I hate what my mind is making me feel/think I have suffered from anxiety for a while and I’m used to it, I can live with it. But recently for the past few days it’s been telling me that “I don’t love my boyfriend and that I want to break up with him” it’s so hard. I love that man so much. He’s my baby. Last night in the shower my mind went down a rabbit whole about about why “I” want to break up with him. And I just cried while repeating that I love him so much. It’s just been hard. Every time I tell him I love him my brain goes “no u don’t” and it’s painful because I know I do. But when the anxiety goes away for a little I’m okay. Does anyone else deal with an issue like this?",-1.4282139219015269,0.4500579612903231,0.7619015280135848,104.13022071307304,91.96774193548387,4.2954159592529715,13.96434634974533,5.750287758089431,-1.233193548387097,524,9,141,4,19,173,84,155,0.139,0.71,0.151,0.5844,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,8,9,1,0,7,1,8,6,1,2,0,19,21,12,0,2,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,12,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,2,25,6,18,18,4,19,0,1,0,4,14,6,0,0,11,89,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21168472523825227,0.0,0.0,0.09674209894845852,0.14176260966844315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12999050927824868,0.0,0.0,0.0843408532162013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445163870146064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15197814554918204,0.08922851241610884,0.14263950164608774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107672704400993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557912278028692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657133924191936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995721598524743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478805400979321,0.13659842400091549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444082655268783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603712758343589,0.1127790337468432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675940092606562,0.1386695852105366,0.12217134602920568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4994886609968234,0.0,0.09235405452528793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794012976650113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20341593017079526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12983822580735158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14722109703272634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320769580960163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13661037658517994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418594016189212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865327437088864,0.0,0.0,0.08067680212688068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949561471117197,0.0,0.0,0.16321252580387202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825788443719294,0.12484524346906745,0.15447011871749428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imjustakiid,2020/02/28,Why do i have a crush on everyone who is nice to me? How can I stop this? Its noticable and i cant act normal around guys. I cant talk to them because i always develop a crush. (I'm 18/F),-2.6699242424242406,-0.9931832954545428,1.7518181818181835,95.56439393939397,97.86363636363636,5.660606060606061,16.424242424242426,7.1686216300943375,0.025451515151515558,141,4,38,3,6,54,34,44,0.153,0.772,0.075,-0.2406,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,1,0,5,7,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,4,7,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,24,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29119138980690484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3115349958409511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21332990262420148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343979130229226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465114164700794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3428825342278056,0.0,0.3984271754364658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925788492343186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.281281341363623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31578081815319875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CyberKovic,2020/02/28,"How does one find their spark again? As the title suggests, I haven't had any motivation or happiness in years and I was wondering if any of you fellow Redditors would have any tips on how to find it again

I would appreciate any kind of help, thank you :)",3.7542000000000013,5.4692146200000025,4.625,84.1675,72.8,9.0,24.5,9.516144504307137,1.9596000000000005,201,6,42,5,4,65,38,50,0.035,0.688,0.27699999999999997,0.9197,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,1,1,4,3,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,3,0,11,8,6,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,6,3,6,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,3,3,28,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6225802928819774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002929178118857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4183811874240109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436451760330911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15341228086925307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383414990760552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15509384021465408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107203616724316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482087221964125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32517711453332715,0.0,0.0,0.14739010280564238
mentalhealth,JENeralGrievous,2020/02/28,Want to stop medication I’ve been on anti-depressants for a little over a year this time around. Previously I was on them from 2009 to 2014 and weaned off when they weren’t working anymore. I know I started them because I needed them and I’m not saying things are perfect I’m just really sick of taking them. I’ve told my doctors and husband this but no one seems to take it seriously and I don’t know what to do. Mostly I probably just needed to vent but I just feel so frustrated.,1.836666666666666,4.076669080808081,3.765949494949497,85.69559090909092,80.41414141414144,6.78828282828283,23.03131313131313,7.908726449838941,1.2752294949494951,385,13,78,7,10,130,67,99,0.157,0.8059999999999999,0.037000000000000005,-0.9061,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,5,2,6,3,1,0,2,0,6,3,0,0,1,21,19,8,0,3,6,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,5,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,4,2,13,1,13,15,1,11,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,2,5,54,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242329557220604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012791895882947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783000461710826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19474177910150112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23142552181268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143242335660234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485200764813568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266141358663574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22777451333074106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33530432439976715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321292694895494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437767707075076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448470713887863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980580816930233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20583525289404886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003653556520547,0.0,0.0,0.18903184056607492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3400019298171154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15021247519493014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184220440759634,0.0,0.0,0.2160506582946897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336113121509385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16460533582706274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456026172471173
mentalhealth,WhenTheSunBleeds,2020/02/28,"Is something wrong with me?? I can't explain it. But I am always worrying..i always need assurance. I am always paranoid and afraid. I think a lot and hate silence. There is ALWAYS something I fear or am anxious about. I always feel I am doing something wrong or that someones out there to get me. As of lately I have been very worried about the coronavirus, my performance at work, wether I'll graduate HS on time, my inability to save money, ect. I care very much what others think of me. My happiness is dependant on being assured. I am never safe. I don't breathe heavy or panic. I just get..scared. Worried. Its like a mental torture. It doesn't hurt to say, but it feels horrible. I am never at peace and I feel my life can be ruined at any moment. The first time I had sex, I had a horrible HIV scare for months. When I found out my mom was sick, I was driven to a suicidal state with worry. ( She ended up being ok) I worry a lot for my younger brother, for my country. I am always worried and its making me miserable. 

I fear the police will come after me sometimes. I feel we are always monitored and that cameras are everywhere. My friends and I texted some escorts for fun and we did it continually to just to annoy them. We pretended to set up appointments only to never show up. I later found out one of them looked up my number to see who I am, but no info exists on me. ( We used my cellphone to do this)  She chewed me out and showed me screenshots of other escorts complaining about me( my number) There were only 2 complaints. I am really worried the Police will come for me if they ratted me out. It was a careless mistake on my part but I don't want to ruin my life over it. I am always analyzing my life and I feel it is over or I haven't done much with it. I feel if I can't reach my goals( Finish highschool, learn languages, travel to a few countries, earn a college degree , join the military, and have a nice family) then my life has no value. I feel I need to do something with myself or I am miserable. I feel I am.always at risk and my mistakes will come to catch up to me. 
Is this normal???",1.6991412958626064,3.8169254519906386,3.7122365339578463,86.55564597970337,80.1943793911007,6.221233411397346,23.281420765027317,7.35660576581511,1.0715879781420758,1636,56,326,23,42,555,197,427,0.24100000000000002,0.68,0.079,-0.9973,1,0,4,0,0,0,64.0,4,0,3,6,9,31,3,8,14,1,46,9,1,3,5,74,73,25,1,8,13,2,8,1,1,3,6,1,0,0,18,27,1,1,15,4,1,6,11,20,0,2,12,11,76,11,53,55,7,44,0,5,2,2,17,20,0,11,17,250,94,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5335070642088576,0.0,0.0,0.04844660384750794,0.0,0.0,0.08048251868674394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726353685977994,0.0,0.0,0.1841045075954469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290470004249917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309874639239259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06716006390203089,0.16033279195059688,0.2881743920323622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059790954833764,0.0,0.15622506453018242,0.05504093900200847,0.0,0.07444139587756142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758378089225458,0.0,0.07033614623354896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626540612211627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036341698018909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012796675900525,0.0348049558744361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059824844355313836,0.0,0.0,0.12113380351954026,0.0,0.0,0.04755419641084783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179458819723937,0.0,0.0,0.08343708193993618,0.05686421621537914,0.0,0.10474127147052996,0.10564921016278046,0.16483730891851428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698014588067451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04827502522629593,0.10836460977413348,0.0,0.08358644839658227,0.0,0.07714750791029351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04563907344174944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665403107989383,0.07132508263004263,0.0,0.05677018254560179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036261809183523,0.21938048123184736,0.0704595791466419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792654292965412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912972417630817,0.0,0.0,0.08308288171777653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061529707184150864,0.0,0.11756325354449132,0.042020031219434435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05186459718298965,0.43409467856872985,0.0,0.0,0.15578260301595834,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reddit1187,2020/02/28,"Do you think mental problems since the childhood are curable? Hello. Im 32, educated and suffer a long time from depression and enxiety (until I am 18 years old). Im working in auditing. Do you think there is a chance to get some mental health in the future or do you think that the prediction isnt very well? What do you think about ayahuasca and healing progress in my case? Its really hard to live like this. Last year I had my first very heavy depression and was about half year in my bed and had very heavy symptoms. Of course Im in therapy, but I think rather pills help me or this therapy.",3.2301694915254235,5.111544898305088,4.0120000000000005,87.31562711864406,74.59322033898306,7.770847457627119,25.359322033898305,8.548686976883017,1.6721125423728818,470,16,96,9,10,150,75,118,0.102,0.826,0.073,-0.3616,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,4,0,3,5,6,0,0,5,0,11,4,0,0,0,16,17,9,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,1,0,5,5,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,4,1,2,3,1,11,2,12,14,1,16,0,3,0,0,6,5,0,3,12,58,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331247057844781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511441600259968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070605138637899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212320337339992,0.0,0.0,0.14385294463355455,0.0,0.0,0.09071104265054382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4385494863395512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031468317991766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611700303433772,0.0,0.11950176272239214,0.1197656911653122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727682243190208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420095083602873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949566861734996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669796244301081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194908495899247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14066309264888868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30953079257405364,0.0,0.0,0.4335804958676834,0.0,0.0,0.07891392194912172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3349923795063718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168086860173047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852423722913248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614505793039857
mentalhealth,FforFujoshi,2020/02/28,"Is this panic attack? Whenever I feel hurt (emotionally), or afraid, or if I'm really startled by something, this happens-

\- Hyperventilation

\- tightness in chest. It feels like my chest is squeezing in.

\- Dizziness

\- Fast heartbeat

\- Eyes keep getting teary

\- I feel like screaming loudly. (I don't scream, just feel like screaming would feel better)

It happens for 2-5 minutes. Then I calm down. My sister said that it was panic attack so I looked it up. But some of the symptoms don't match. I don't feel fear of dying because I know I won't die from this. The average length of a panic attack is said to be 10 minutes which is different in my case. 

It started last February/March. Till now (it's been almost a year) it happened 20 times. It happened 4 times in this month alone. I don't know if this is a normal frequency. Well I don't even know what it is. So is this panic attack? Is the frequency normal?",1.3758335403726711,4.031580948571431,2.9533913043478286,87.44017391304348,88.0857142857143,5.329192546583852,22.465838509316765,6.895973343053719,0.9446596273291928,706,26,133,10,23,231,100,175,0.198,0.7,0.102,-0.9628,1,1,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,0,1,6,21,4,7,6,0,18,4,3,0,0,22,38,9,2,5,6,1,8,3,0,2,1,6,0,0,18,0,0,2,9,0,0,0,6,15,1,0,4,16,13,6,14,31,1,16,0,1,2,0,3,6,0,6,13,82,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987370808680409,0.10212340482175147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4487024957384145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060107729002667865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720671116060102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466956284552554,0.10301958615984133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109155746883225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512662828129556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095625972794196,0.29914110800680954,0.21132690665063414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051516216707847985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487787110234558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105556999376022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876432493374727,0.0,0.0,0.16256958109768682,0.08037494688678118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14451794957877728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280203803245995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870430829350962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19322083021262124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4627594674898505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316787507954971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18758886279992226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590972925333363,0.0,0.0,0.06979200745876757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10248670688874334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149928931027908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865631545213838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004503976878917,0.0,0.0,0.0634973689791386
mentalhealth,alexraine_03,2020/02/28,"Mental ward for lint choice? So i have decided to give up my voice for lint (40 day) in hopes to learn more about deaf culture and improve on my sign language, as well as try to understand why more religious christians partake in such event (lint). I still live with my parents because i am disabled and struggle to earn an income. I finally got a job TODAY that allows me to work on my own schedule and i can work deaf/mute and I was told if i didnt speak in 24 hours they would call the mental ward to come pick me up. 

I do randomly go deaf/mute and have other disabilities that hinder me keeping a job. I am using lint to improve on my communication skills because of it.

Can the mental ward keep me because of this choice? I feel like I am making this choice in a good mindset.",4.713797468354429,5.101702405063293,5.508708860759494,83.7093924050633,69.25316455696202,8.092151898734178,29.7240506329114,7.908726449838941,1.8222663291139245,612,22,126,7,10,200,95,158,0.015,0.877,0.10800000000000001,0.9211,4,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,4,5,5,0,1,6,0,11,1,0,4,0,22,23,9,0,3,1,1,1,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,6,7,0,2,4,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,4,4,21,4,24,18,3,18,1,0,0,0,7,9,0,3,8,81,27,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28536155765160515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593342587262073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441461999777246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10063287370643316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889849881466934,0.11147498787430613,0.0,0.1709341632246383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496877605976522,0.08868111258643295,0.1308789260682324,0.1247994209139462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549829014642908,0.15366794152515076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096911916372601,0.2773909951744493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07623324891395432,0.0,0.13778615492509794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415789363358788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4717547753078716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17326392390713627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461372398590935,0.0,0.0,0.16312685966784102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790764910874812,0.14910288112736686,0.0,0.1059408989197608,0.0,0.0,0.16244311491612812,0.0,0.13476843643457406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14029867535532956,0.0,0.14080180514814244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22719791751133103,0.0,0.0,0.11084631979859104,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Magistyna,2020/02/28,"Is it normal to feel guilty and regretful after a life-death experience? These feelings of guilt and resentment are eating me alive. I was put in a life or death situation by the love of my life. Everything is done for, we’re never going to see or contact each other again. 

A tiny part of me is relieved because 1) I could have died, 2) he showed me who he truly was 3) it was an abusive, loveless relationship. 

But that piece of my mind is being suffocated by guilt. I feel guilty I ruined his life, I feel guilty I threw away our whole life and the home we had, I feel guilty I had to call the police. 

I can’t stop wondering how he’s doing. Is he angry? Is he crying like me? How is he coping? Why do I even care about these things? 

I feel regretful. I keep making “what if” scenarios. What if I didn’t do that? What if I forced myself to love him more and fixed our relationship? What if I just stayed with him forever? 

I’m going to see if I can seek counseling through victim services but please, if anyone’s advice or insight could take a load off my mind, it would mean everything. I’m showing bad signs of PTSD, he and the fact we are no longer in a relationship is ALL I can dream about and I can’t sleep. 

This is awful. Why me? Why do I have to suffer like this? Why can’t I snap my finger and forget him? It’s ruining my quality of life.",0.5201276881720425,2.7655464731182846,2.6977676971326154,91.24998487903228,86.06093189964157,5.924775985663082,18.396169354838708,7.292943589461545,0.3329900537634409,1042,27,229,17,32,352,144,279,0.198,0.721,0.08,-0.982,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,4,0,0,0,7,16,2,2,10,1,33,10,2,3,3,50,54,20,2,12,12,0,7,2,0,1,5,0,1,0,17,11,1,2,9,3,0,4,6,10,0,0,8,9,39,6,24,42,6,13,0,5,2,2,23,4,0,10,6,154,56,1,0.0,0.11914442969717386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826381940331333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031228104600769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944772681286912,0.0,0.08396147815484961,0.06129903981261633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268065344417517,0.0,0.10252527569063666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057427998818627,0.0,0.1104579102464824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043630152849544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029054387042355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028956300739532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06641741163934856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807495512697357,0.09836472488294533,0.0,0.0,0.3050699634399046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429851510061563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008675708156239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938030299242122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4261612588116276,0.0982548244832646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18151449830550892,0.0,0.06712304475614059,0.0,0.0,0.1095368134337033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030692199112613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755629645823962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852519434983598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889418846548052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11038215631268132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11754656863311926,0.1010882614622761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238840073543089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602629333024939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303106659268213,0.10063032031320944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718112723545402,0.0,0.08407073882716584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07560687489681307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668060668132832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3629507294742936,0.11226907952721953,0.0,0.0,0.10905053478556544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714333040476829,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TCM2bubba,2020/02/28,"I “like” my mental health. There. I said it. Like probably isn’t the right word at all but before my depression and anxiety I was a truly horrible person. It’s absolutely changed my life for the better and made me into a person I’m really proud of, one that’s caring, thoughtful, helpful and many many more things.

Yes, there are bad effects too and it’s also destroyed my life to the point where I can barely leave my house or eat and take care of myself anymore. And honestly that just isn’t enough for me to not appreciate what it’s done for me. I feel like I can finally think about stuff and see things for what they really are. I finally have my own voice and can reflect on myself and learn and grow. In my opinion it’s worth all of the pain and suffering I go through on a daily basis.

Without it I don’t know where I’d be right now and honestly I don’t want to think about it because I would definitely be somebody I’m ashamed of. 

Sorry if this is a weird post I don’t expect people to relate to it it’s just something I’ve needed to get off my chest because I feel really guilty about not despising my mental health when nobody on earth would want to have it. (I don’t want it but I’m glad I do). I still have such a long way to go and I don’t think I’d be able to do it without my mental health.",2.627945676465533,3.75614219855596,4.33623517276947,87.46760529482556,74.66787003610108,7.586659790269897,23.659790269898572,8.11559375814309,1.1380649475674751,1027,29,226,16,21,347,134,277,0.141,0.649,0.21,0.9579,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,3,15,18,2,1,9,1,25,8,1,2,2,46,48,19,0,8,10,0,2,3,0,2,6,2,0,2,20,14,1,0,10,0,1,3,11,8,0,1,5,5,33,10,30,38,5,23,0,2,1,0,5,12,0,3,9,154,53,1,0.10360275189448212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285108325937406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925582162607678,0.0,0.10274609098943784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650397034205493,0.12631055189779858,0.0,0.08815831115896641,0.0,0.0,0.09162821486233927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112598206357703,0.0,0.10959797426969707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923289839611799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060215852952224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601147964342013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704933746826724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476932854448172,0.07401382665422669,0.0,0.2269835012757999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05412816181897389,0.0,0.11775966285597705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303746417422318,0.0,0.0,0.06944274074258877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954366571449825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056937362995174164,0.0,0.0,0.10970035519980734,0.0,0.0,0.14635537512089614,0.15184521419552702,0.0,0.0,0.09168517523814254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098031428852302,0.0,0.21007385865219932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31322161884700545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768201277840559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020390594399452,0.0,0.11024063255285484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718251033606234,0.180923853619666,0.0,0.0,0.0979380879090902,0.0,0.0992227978691505,0.0,0.11170128932908108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991117272910524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769523680841374,0.09854994184311523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255797976639666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975845998087422,0.0,0.11597479866364548,0.0,0.0,0.08273729149206381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860036417795775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789637590309155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765812963958154,0.1991533803546384,0.0,0.08224901246453314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833227619663268,0.08223504214268006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19973871150691566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719284487534573,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,undercovermascot,2020/02/28,"Anyone else has a shy and seductive personality and regresses in age sometimes? I am equal parts shy and seductive. I can be very shy and coquettish towards guys and I used to wear sexy clothes. But actually I am erotophobic and I am a biromantic homosexual female. I guess I just like the tease but I don't actually enjoy real intimacy with guys. So anyone who has a shy and seductive personality? It is interesting how this part of me developed since I was exposed to MTV and pussycat dolls and black eyed peas from a young age and that shaped my thinking. I even tried to shake my booty like them in elementary school once.

 I always thought I had munchausen(not diagnosed) since I liked some mental ward stays, but then I realised, no, actually I just wanted to be a baby. I have precious moments baby doll, resin baby snowglobes with babyish tunes. I can act grown up and pay my bills and do a lot of adult things but it is so comfortable being a baby. I love going out to explore new shopping malls, do new things, travel overseas etc., but once I get scared or anxious I want to go back in my room and hide away from the big bad world.

Sometimes I really speak in a baby voice to my hamsters, to guys and my behaviour starts to seem more shy and naïve. I really love my hamsters so much. There is something about them that tickles the child in me.

So any of you regress in age sometimes?

And I am not seeking a diagnosis here, I already have enough diagnoses.",4.366256874797802,6.113599195729543,5.432644775153673,78.86285263668718,71.27758007117437,8.525461015852475,29.8545778065351,9.095868883498916,2.591916725978648,1158,48,218,24,22,382,159,281,0.12,0.748,0.131,0.9064,0,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,2,0,12,13,1,2,12,0,21,6,2,2,0,40,34,28,0,2,9,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,1,7,8,19,0,0,4,4,3,7,3,4,0,0,3,4,36,9,27,28,9,32,0,0,2,2,15,14,0,5,13,149,44,2,0.0,0.0,0.3158597431714104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906099904593465,0.0,0.08977440562027927,0.0,0.0,0.07336994804488017,0.0,0.0,0.12188673189877787,0.0,0.15088054897647268,0.1105476343991032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013676549031808,0.0829619357410325,0.090084930601175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21901528724462396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012953866444252,0.0,0.0,0.11148080369719514,0.1203275887221772,0.07126134567575852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636887742551215,0.0,0.12263449890277545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188546968695548,0.3204887665964715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15813107223674347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172553042812062,0.19475265731746044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872929756883218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931269723401653,0.0,0.0,0.20840464637915154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298019412045955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336720511921448,0.0,0.0,0.18841346510428364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280419480237928,0.13823616853629558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801825497066707,0.10919200015112884,0.0,0.09822040734741284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849799625969082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830601798255329,0.32012248025838624,0.0,0.07636618845739845,0.114998027916495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433566922562443,0.06913254338614216,0.0,0.08565383242623811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325127455788179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931836508814448,0.0,0.08902182113421868,0.1272744532152685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jodiecurran1,2020/02/28,"Attitudes towards mental health in the workplace Hiya everyone i am currently in my final year at university studying psychology and counselling. I am conducting my major research project on the attitudes towards mental health in the workplace i would really appreciate it if you could spare ten minutes of your time to fill in my questionnaire thank you.
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSfgOetGEFVr6o2SdnHdK8CJ_nbm8spumiTODefUoUYGowVSGg/viewform",16.999000000000002,20.837732233333334,12.876666666666667,29.460000000000008,43.33333333333333,13.333333333333332,46.66666666666667,12.602617957971056,7.271166666666666,394,19,37,11,4,115,44,60,0.0,0.909,0.091,0.6697,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,9,1,10,3,1,13,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,4,30,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145407156908476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25676110284794523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943554405662873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5712460607657515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5415870145767042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17214061779599746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473893510440105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566852425852142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19088177976795945,0.0,0.0,0.17303853122689594
mentalhealth,cbtiscool,2020/02/28,"Feeling happy for just a second Sometimes whenever I feel sad and not okay there's this little moment where my mood changes and I suddenly become happy. for just a second.
It can be different kinds of happy, for example, motivated and looking ahead, relaxed kind of happy, and the funny happy, where I find everything funny. I don't know why this happens. Is it normal?",3.1838235294117645,6.140048264705883,4.904411764705884,75.03985294117648,81.05882352941177,6.9294117647058835,26.14705882352941,8.07648339933343,2.42649411764706,294,12,44,6,8,99,48,68,0.055999999999999994,0.5660000000000001,0.37799999999999995,0.9803,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,5,11,0,0,3,1,4,0,0,1,0,13,9,4,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,3,5,9,6,8,0,6,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,3,34,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16591463293374614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15892093067638796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695591642038767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13501492207085458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519192239598984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13730534743115724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284581179464036,0.7996006166320548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3128779526574141,0.08256118580427317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505675681581457,0.0,0.0,0.12615338738301682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471911973635558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857898384387733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13555708468233593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xahodo,2020/02/28,"Wondering what this is and how to deal with it So, I (45/M) got some anger issues, which weren't there before 2007. What happened in 2007? Well, from that time until 2012 I got seriously bullied and got traumatized because of it. Details don't matter, I got treated for it (EMDR).

Now, whenever I see injustice (whether on TV or in real life) or someone makes a small slight against me, my head gets extremely violent and the anger explodes inside of my head. I sometimes end up talking in myself or even screaming. Before my mind's eye I see all kinds of movies of all the terrible ways I'll end up abusing or murdering the culprit. This invariably ends up in me feeling distressed, because I cannot be this violent person.

Sometimes I encounter an issue (inside of my head) and invariably some imaginary people are opposing me and my head starts doing all kinds of horrible things and I get an explosion of anger (all inside of my head).

Now, pre-2007 this wasn't a problem. However, 2007-present it's been an issue. Also, I'm not entirely sure whether this has anything to do with the bullying as thoughts can pop up regarding complete strangers who had nothing to do with it.

Someone got any pointers in the right direction?",6.256826783114993,7.295464668122271,6.54391266375546,75.33758660844252,66.07423580786026,9.949461426491997,37.53740902474527,10.047579312681364,4.040381426491994,975,51,167,22,15,314,134,229,0.23199999999999998,0.745,0.023,-0.9947,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,0,8,16,6,1,10,0,14,7,6,2,5,33,30,17,1,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,16,9,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,11,1,0,10,5,19,5,29,19,6,21,0,0,3,0,4,12,0,7,8,115,35,0,0.0,0.119520001344914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066944561983677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859824193886759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301126704269803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298453800093398,0.0,0.1716738468152799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576518337361142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399736629210304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680350774239409,0.0,0.0,0.06662677515547287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05100526944944698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540571431486744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4033934857114969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920314689870648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5176326231379296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158608754018585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21009091363309249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125077011681755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733463259607969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185467125317194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967919766277242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993380221173391,0.08807988017013417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652344589788976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11481747078529225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614642605079988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16076812027669887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17094157902010199,0.0,0.1995352769174865,0.0,0.07139961811810673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507319264976903,0.0,0.0,0.08107924719027106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701665546317542,0.0,0.0,0.08008322857434973,0.05882083746255747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006962611950323,0.0,0.0,0.09069845240919316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10939428807004932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,darkpassanger12,2020/02/28,"I have problems I need your help to understand what could be wrong with me.I sometimes have anxiety and sometimes not even a bit.I feel disconnected from people in my life,i dont think i have fellings about them.Right now i think i only have fellings for this one girl who goes to my class.The problem is she is not my gf,she is my friend,but i always saw her as something more,but she never saw me as something more.I don't have a good releationship with my parents,they think there is nothing wrong with me.Ever since i was a little maybe 5-6 i have had this voice in my head,it tells me violent things and dark thoughts.The voice is the loudest around the girl i was talking about.I mostly don't act on these ""urges"" but sometimes they build up and make me nervous,angry and violent.I don't want to loose her and to her be scared of me.I acted on the voice maybe 3-4 times.I don't understand emotion,like i can't see when people are deppresed,sad or just angry at me.I really want to know what is wrong with me,and what i could be going thru.I am 16,male with a normal looking body type.I would say i am semi-good looking which helps when i need to charm.My dad did hit me in the past and only stopped around 3 months ago.I have hurt animals when i was a little child,when i didn't know that these ""urges"" were bad.Thank you for reading and i would really love to hear your thoughts and opinions in the cooments.",2.9925114016418384,4.027400377926424,3.799417756156888,92.02952493159016,73.64882943143812,6.9079355427181515,24.627698388567964,7.1686216300943375,0.7738214046822742,1119,33,253,11,22,357,149,299,0.131,0.818,0.052000000000000005,-0.9472,1,0,2,0,1,0,37.0,0,3,1,0,10,10,1,1,10,0,36,2,1,1,1,45,59,15,0,11,5,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,2,11,15,0,1,9,1,0,5,10,8,0,1,10,11,35,2,29,41,1,25,0,1,5,1,20,12,0,3,8,143,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136955008684347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576645232478003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885190454444879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18351676803363987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606311400452753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253093504447816,0.1144928149543388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16459360731276007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080284381657035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807990277708953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05211769258131912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963529911350813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058579757954656225,0.17290842631163225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578443448672704,0.0,0.11617273880029705,0.0,0.13817766952624466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034365580729433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329437812378765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280474690582775,0.0,0.2066159640745521,0.0,0.0,0.1731136663377287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302898962980756,0.0,0.06880319856356724,0.0,0.20710488880189154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227328510877466,0.0,0.0,0.15285724780443696,0.07949760450315367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099137390137047,0.09890300623196982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984612078416655,0.15678599001312107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839651567288707,0.14291811195415385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19725723771273396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310264731244814,0.0,0.13206465335427714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880252765715682,0.0,0.08196918135551245,0.1031958101102138,0.0,0.08213723366133864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852645015051892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870396253528685,0.3058307014284392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08617510957564434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284758271839979,0.09009187804253747,0.09489738478772468,0.0,0.0,0.0684782863605836,0.1981384208155308,0.0,0.08182984097151404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146089077065323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12159232075588335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14644269550942193,0.3380881870693752,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Still_Photo,2020/02/28,"I keep having this traumatising dream since I was around 8. Does it show any signs of a certain instability ? I'm not sure what's with me. It's about inside a volcano, where I sit on a stone and have in front of me two cages, where a person I  care for, or take part of my life is in each of them.

I have three choices : Kill the person I'd rather see die by drowning them into lava and let the other one live, or commit suicide.

It's been haunting me for so long - it's always at the back of my mind - I keep inserting two people in these two 'insert people cages' , and when I tell this to others, such as my parents or friends, they don't believe me 

'' Silly you ! Did you take this from the depressing books you read (No, I have this ever since I was young.) Well, The scars on your arm do say something about you after all ! Hee-hee! (past self harm events.)  '' 

No one takes me seriously.",2.13095238095238,3.600130483516484,3.4705714285714286,91.79109523809522,76.58241758241758,5.952234432234433,20.375091575091574,6.42735559955562,0.023253772893772062,676,15,152,5,15,221,117,182,0.163,0.7559999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.9559,1,0,1,0,0,2,28.0,0,5,3,0,12,10,1,0,9,0,12,2,1,0,5,21,20,9,4,1,5,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,3,12,7,0,2,0,4,0,1,4,4,1,6,4,2,25,6,23,15,3,20,0,1,1,0,15,10,0,3,8,108,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594361999869646,0.0,0.0,0.09475726758271158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12404382972323112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714531703612544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699060051881095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14206834972075358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001497092807505,0.0,0.14461488889972654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193903228235208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604272249321988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765520327149423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477069592475897,0.1541611628111005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14248652946077925,0.09842130204226343,0.0,0.0,0.12304144711492468,0.12331319321148315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069559314780974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888433499829557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472268561332073,0.15089369470366035,0.13301760668812015,0.19320425194450955,0.2433359380076368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937960399232088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11081026854997812,0.0,0.0,0.1110374505326586,0.0,0.14536398696679972,0.0,0.0,0.2305301127405888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727219924405244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524174182244713,0.0,0.13132808802717208,0.0,0.3143032936544841,0.0,0.12179095893086027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083503559501132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12528509887957084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fromashes-tobeauty,2020/02/28,"Memories from rape coming back - is this normal? ***TRIGGER WARNING*** ***TRIGGER WARNING*** ⚠️ 

Hi everyone, to make a long story short, I was repeatedly raped and verbally abused for about 3 hours when I was 17 which was 10 years ago, and I have been on a long healing journey since then. I truly believe that my self-worth has been completely restored and that I feel healed and whole. The problem is that while I’ve always been able to remember bits and pieces from the rape but not the parts I dissociated from, more vivid memories are starting to come back and I’m not sure why. I feel more whole and healed from the rape than I ever have, so why now have I been having vivid nightmares of body memories, and visual flashbacks suddenly returning out of nowhere that I didn’t remember before but provide greater detail into what happened? This morning I suddenly had a very clear visual flashback of being forced to perform oral sex on him and while I’ve always known that happened, I couldn’t remember most of the details before. This morning some of them came back. I just don’t understand - why now? I’m not able to go to therapy (long story) and I know this isn’t the best place to ask this obviously but if anyone has any insight, I would greatly appreciate it. Thank you so much.",3.5443888096935154,5.965838331967214,4.216243763364221,83.7294689950107,75.51639344262296,7.194297933000712,27.821810406272267,8.18289091462,2.0526673556664283,1019,42,187,18,23,324,139,244,0.10400000000000001,0.799,0.09699999999999999,-0.1808,0,0,0,0,1,0,35.0,0,1,1,2,11,9,4,0,9,0,23,9,1,3,4,45,39,20,0,5,8,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,13,15,0,0,9,0,0,5,7,5,0,0,10,4,19,4,23,26,12,32,0,0,2,5,5,6,0,3,21,128,32,0,0.2209911943051132,0.13091921425202227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979476799529081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838823768973233,0.0,0.0,0.0751407951192165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726109067966806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329846752844624,0.0,0.0,0.25489288117243786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18804722958309167,0.12449069976537595,0.1159583121750018,0.0,0.12063257398183405,0.12273569898720432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637752677957034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190364345996227,0.11585253134774567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09994959361680948,0.0,0.1055832782640562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173978788310028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279719423383354,0.0,0.0,0.12182178594441895,0.0,0.0,0.19542178328938456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881590555218833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072549048553527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29335537915904303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.073756669111705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122697769348566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826222477284876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196559639988818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544438123539412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572936371864464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3755099152334799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527100602442455,0.0,0.0,0.09140309979458977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820935238229695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041407926546058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172950030640933,0.12636134513072714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502981347234086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117043968593404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991152698184006,0.2467287763911304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784929019436171,0.0,0.0,0.07115554182578998
mentalhealth,awwfuckme,2020/02/28,"I've been thinking recently that it would've been so good to have ended my life 30 years ago before I met my wife and had a family. I'm not suicidal now but just because it would be unthinkable to hurt my family and put that lifelong burden on my kids (making it almost certain to pass on the likelihood to do it to). Maybe that is still suicidal, in a way. I don't know.  I can't tell my wife this because she would think it's about her doing something wrong or not doing enough.  It's like a regret I have, like not traveling more when you're younger.  It's comforting to think about the peace and serenity I would've had if I hadn't lived longer.  Ugh...this sucks.",4.121014492753623,4.5959815362318865,5.097246376811594,85.82818840579714,70.59420289855072,9.031884057971016,26.20289855072464,9.150863307647796,1.7993855072463774,524,15,114,10,9,172,83,138,0.13,0.693,0.177,0.7194,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,7,10,1,0,5,0,16,1,0,1,1,20,24,8,2,4,7,2,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,11,3,0,0,4,1,0,3,6,5,0,0,6,0,13,5,11,15,2,14,0,2,0,0,7,3,1,3,9,72,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376018777150767,0.0,0.1623969096513253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19772327377671398,0.0,0.13800074206849264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364074773598542,0.16757226646416826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30577221730818244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602643227535946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17361390816934102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912827663620694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11455046102219972,0.15846304950758028,0.0,0.14320532445101036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825445386759114,0.0,0.16292866537188025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16303274943471396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16013029190640732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485183210637475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951481797392286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547907853917493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141749907838803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117495550116784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287286098217114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4608237511116221,0.1773151675812711,0.0,0.10443671620172178
mentalhealth,tony280169,2020/02/28,"Eviction with mental health problems. I am currently being evicted 5th March for £480.
I've been struggling with mental health issues for 17 months and got behind on rent and as such being evicted with serious problems and cannot look after myself at the moment ! 
Any donation is totally appreciated, thanks in advance. 
God speed, Tony.",6.263728813559317,8.898567576271189,6.412000000000003,70.10884745762712,68.15254237288136,8.109830508474579,32.13898305084746,8.841846274778883,3.2696549152542382,273,12,38,5,5,87,48,59,0.18600000000000005,0.684,0.129,-0.4443,6,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,1,0,6,2,0,0,1,9,9,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,4,0,0,2,1,2,1,11,5,1,10,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,6,25,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155379716919446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900041386719111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5050455071191766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479583652878983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994965591618897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4788235879638148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189623819278658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4546393248548847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483567490815033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187198981931205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MeisterBubu,2020/02/28,"Behavior Therapy Hi, I'm F25 and never been in my life in a proper relationship. Lately I'm feeling more and more down about it cause my friends around me starting to get marry, moving in together etc. And I've never been even close to be in that kind commitment. That's why I'm thinking about to go to psychiatrist for getting behavior therapy, cause I've reached the point where I think that I might be the problem.
Just wanted to know if some of you had similar experience and got professional help and if you felt better afterwards. Tbh  I'm still a bit afraid to get help.",4.8893141592920335,6.144266106194693,6.00016592920354,77.20254977876108,69.35398230088495,9.897787610619467,30.9391592920354,10.125756701596842,3.175815044247788,462,19,88,12,8,154,73,113,0.023,0.802,0.175,0.9393,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,1,7,5,0,1,4,0,6,1,0,2,3,24,22,7,0,4,3,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,5,2,7,3,16,14,5,17,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,4,6,54,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726019527682369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463018628689427,0.1805974205724436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3398668702395076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18448868577025668,0.10925933237385307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618139566806183,0.0,0.0,0.08364207444516095,0.0,0.15883056956400687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12780423090530685,0.0,0.259277699113256,0.0,0.09401284349221377,0.0,0.13230267510307142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22175707228672706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17226102349844094,0.09091132339044368,0.0,0.18660264316531294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684208872364887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754860569083343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17581686205073147,0.0,0.0,0.2551664981595179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15637677464795216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15828602288821542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760077032337968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708618028005527,0.0,0.13210581360998291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3783477751889826,0.0,0.0,0.21199081954035595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756987925698064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492671628122831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pipecu,2020/02/28,"Depersonalization or something else? About a year ago I was going into my kitchen to lunch with my family. As I went through the door,  I felt rather weird and threatened by the presence of my older brother (he was sitting next to my twin brother) as if I didn’t know who he was and seeing him next to my twin brother made me very anxious as to protect the latter.

For context, we’re four brothers but only us three live together with our parents. He was 29 and I was 17 at that moment. We also have a really good and friendly relationship between us three, we talk and laugh a lot everyday. 

Such thing has never happened to me before or after the event. However, when I was a bit younger, I sometimes had these “reflexion moments” where I thought to myself in third person, like being an observer of me for a few seconds, but it wasn’t a big deal. I also went regularly to a psychologist and a psychiatrist for a few years (12 to 15 y/o) for generalized anxiety (that is a problem long gone though).

I don’t know what to think, does anybody know what could have happened? I can answer any questions you have.",5.848525641025637,6.101213268518523,6.732592592592592,76.3870512820513,66.77777777777777,9.238746438746439,34.20797720797721,9.057496981413335,2.956240455840456,870,38,164,14,13,290,138,216,0.05,0.858,0.092,0.9135,2,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,5,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,15,0,18,2,0,1,1,31,32,18,0,4,6,5,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,8,11,2,1,8,0,0,4,4,2,0,5,15,2,27,4,28,15,4,24,0,0,1,0,22,5,0,5,15,123,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232378297214638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22235748684754367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454219353117477,0.0,0.10635422387683566,0.15705938607190806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183005685795522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517799770079573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100065028213472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433293165075942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216622627808407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613807170855465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13106098786568462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348640373806164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107410854301465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790114674864751,0.11660809962917572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458798050598128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22921454575974085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792089873796589,0.0,0.122762175421966,0.1230333047264254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819461619599952,0.0,0.13154940945932267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722513395011933,0.0,0.29571066236134963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057352538213404,0.0,0.0,0.15437150584939954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139181474458895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330287489073924,0.0,0.0,0.1557405193858548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906337640291218,0.0,0.0,0.14926149416106987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078542475175973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702871959233556,0.1374998996580769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117435325245757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923624488256992,0.08908200796485465,0.13659197233695594,0.1103708182671024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33446142223325903,0.0,0.0,0.1147107019487146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25775629753256457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17905589088952886
mentalhealth,SPAG3DD13,2020/02/28,"I have a problem with making scenarios in my head and sometimes thinking they're real Before you continue to read just want to you that i did post this on another Reddit page, so the beginning introduction to my problem might sound a little weird. 

I haven't fully stopped this but sometimes when its very quiet and my mind does what to have silence or just to be at peace I create scenarios / false realities in my mind and speak (move my mouth and all) the words that are being said in my head by these fake characters. It gets so bad that I make scenarios in my head that I either
- start laughing out loud, which to people in the real word is weird because why am i laughing at nothing
- I start to speak too loud to where my parents would ask me who am i talking to while im sitting alone 
- the reality in my mind is so real to me that I sometimes getn mad at a person IRL that I was mad at in my head (reality / scenario created in my head). this is the worst one because i love my friends and family and I don't want to he mean to them for literally doing nothing to me IRL

This, making of seemingly real scenarios / fake realities only happens when I'm super bored, very quiet outside/ around me or when i haven't spoken to someone like a friend in a while. Its annoying af because I never notice it until mid way but i now snap myself out of it asap when i realise im doing it.

If anyone knows if there's something wrong with me, in all seriousness please tell me what this means, if I'm going nuts or is maybe a sign of some sort of mental illness.

For now its nothing too serious but you can never be too cautous. Thanks for reading my dumb ass problem , if you have any tips on how to fully stop this, plz say so. Thanks again for reading.",5.714631728045326,5.392651589235129,6.670270538243628,78.67662393767706,67.10198300283287,9.32628895184136,31.8143059490085,8.841846274778883,2.4805842492917844,1373,50,273,20,20,460,177,353,0.175,0.6809999999999999,0.14400000000000002,-0.9319,1,1,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,4,1,1,20,26,4,0,11,0,23,9,7,4,4,58,46,28,0,10,13,1,0,1,2,2,1,9,0,1,24,11,0,2,5,3,0,2,5,17,0,1,3,9,42,9,46,38,6,45,0,0,0,2,19,22,2,11,19,191,66,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295739030374741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054469398887916194,0.08398975570134326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056006396526273344,0.0,0.0,0.0713042177464831,0.07488083435090574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687849929652573,0.14648102490852724,0.0,0.06815751378247979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009431528401043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755092827875454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12376705996162746,0.0,0.04184790845805335,0.0,0.04552154946374616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07083041275041803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.411018373506202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730392085619921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04401977592429116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0391318456659682,0.08027925649590129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072291588440389,0.0,0.1603981468701045,0.0,0.0804692249418008,0.17450044618459273,0.0,0.0,0.08071996284441868,0.08497133926613036,0.2426284942709209,0.0,0.0,0.08513151698327112,0.0,0.0,0.12355305866715326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23056862545182036,0.09119212432860026,0.0,0.0,0.05427648991974884,0.060918152010197936,0.0,0.0,0.08893936997840618,0.0,0.0,0.05552988036944512,0.06993849975429994,0.0,0.08792357073194591,0.0,0.0,0.07671176006432608,0.0,0.0,0.2299289571298515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24035908085057525,0.364676320485247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619155733737695,0.06369715877737167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291822727565872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786679068593263,0.06166336745736194,0.2376569635774722,0.0,0.11338757874249525,0.0,0.0,0.1339310591255057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437975277375946,0.0700091981562921,0.14748698685093128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05132357568977068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321785067129225,0.09448777251666117,0.06357807839734751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227600275525282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056899333831291414,0.08757460863699547,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,juliussinc,2020/02/28,"The events around the world made me so anxious and apathetic I just lost interest in everything I had, because the things in the world that happening right now are terrifying me. I’m only 21 and I suppose to party and relax but I can’t. 
“Don’t read the news!” - Yeah, but they are everywhere, in every social media
I don’t know how to get distracted from all of it, I’m so sensitive person and I’m just afraid of living :(",-0.1084033613445392,2.153653764705883,2.603739495798319,87.20897058823532,99.58823529411764,6.19327731092437,19.01260504201681,7.447530270364453,1.100731092436975,330,11,66,8,14,114,56,85,0.16699999999999998,0.735,0.09699999999999999,-0.7337,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,7,5,0,2,5,1,6,0,0,2,1,14,14,9,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,8,2,9,11,1,9,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,44,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31659738014125915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24947770077208545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17083491204240106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23611872214535246,0.0,0.2518663733335795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641658395797755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24781996179438706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15401546827342086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474617028061069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059208110568611,0.0,0.0,0.2651748452326379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131391519197778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446993553198667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803211027595016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23932792457282456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28567475494860817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618250110986345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dfa_animation,2020/02/28,"My teachers opinion on suicide (Trigger warning: Suicide, selfharm, self worth)

I am neither depressed nor suicidal, I am here cause I need your help

Yesterday my teacher casually said that people kill and cut themselves only for attention.

I was so shocked. That is just wrong and something you can't say as a teacher. Especially not if you state it as fact and not as your own opinion. In his classes could sit a person with suicidal thoughts or depressions and he just drops a sentence like that.
Wtf

I can't peacefully go on with my life without having said something against that. So I am writing him an email in which I explain why people really do things like selfharm and suicide. And why it is bad to say something provocative like that.

I have a long list of arguments and things me and my friends have experienced, but I am asking you if there is anything that you would like to say to this topic. And maybe someone can show me an interesting perspective.

I am 17 and in highschool btw.",5.88062034739454,7.2945011397849475,5.850215053763439,78.60301488833748,67.17204301075269,8.518775847808106,37.42597187758478,8.841846274778883,3.4243966914805632,796,43,139,13,13,250,112,186,0.166,0.732,0.102,-0.8885,0,0,3,0,0,3,18.0,0,6,0,0,6,14,2,0,6,0,18,1,0,3,1,34,25,20,6,5,9,0,0,4,1,1,1,5,0,2,12,12,0,0,3,2,1,1,7,7,0,0,4,6,24,7,17,19,2,11,0,2,0,0,22,5,0,5,6,102,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535278906934758,0.0,0.10832468525010032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967482861147844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903246990589715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251436923442984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19960078018943855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952242540358005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585273201750227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766656401310304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819520820634786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184382549519341,0.2264368393737181,0.0,0.0,0.1025430801771132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164090055846801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591762520075777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812588294086815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16066212042476016,0.10117496737878057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423057494583142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204416267214442,0.2764382128896908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087977435502255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981779757626214,0.2676117966305439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6337258459675149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15396042585945358,0.0,0.0,0.09198943076383297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20911292769278408,0.0,0.0,0.1116964801306622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231214945243827,0.12668785008521347,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sad-boi-alex,2020/02/28,"Prescription Problems I could drone on for hours about how I've struggled with ADHD and depression for years but I recently opened up and started taking meds for the depression and it's crazy to think this is how normal people feel ahahaha, anyways I've been struggling with school. 

I've done meditation, focus seminars, courses on managing schedules and yourself, basically everything under the sun I can in order to deal with my adhd. 

When I first went to my doctor and was like man im sad I think I need meds, she said nah you're fine- then I was like I'ma finnah kms a$ap rocky- she was like oh actually yeah maybe those pills are a good idea. And they've made a world of a difference in my life! 

Now I'm facing the adhd thingy, I don't know what or how I can just get meds and be done w it, because literally nothing else works. I tried my friends meds and while everyone was tweaking out I just sat there wondering when it was gonna kick in. It helped my focus and studying a lot, and I feel like I actually retained the information and am more able to call upon the info from that day! 

Basically just how do I convince my doctor that I actually need them without sounding like every other desperate university student ?",2.841750000000001,5.298858341666668,4.338333333333335,81.77000000000002,78.08333333333334,7.5,26.25,8.472884824447931,2.0907499999999994,982,39,184,21,24,326,147,240,0.107,0.758,0.135,0.7926,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,13,15,0,2,9,1,17,5,1,5,0,43,34,21,0,5,6,0,2,5,1,1,4,2,0,1,10,16,0,1,9,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,12,4,24,9,23,19,2,25,1,3,0,0,10,11,0,3,17,113,34,6,0.1008484989942173,0.0,0.29524076234244795,0.0,0.3636008938727053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06147630894494902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297759301123924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051932032983303,0.0,0.0,0.06503893886310852,0.10397037422030728,0.1737213288179324,0.0,0.0,0.105365216940106,0.0,0.2064454240747576,0.0,0.2064060566441386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424598031292171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496920996272403,0.09636506255645384,0.0906361281472486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198406249965374,0.07204618783195173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578168172600165,0.0,0.0,0.07791530015741416,0.0,0.05268917835618179,0.0,0.0,0.08458693623172274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759662308070069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931545712616477,0.0,0.0,0.11384568004298425,0.1089336846030686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055423697631124674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123227728405586,0.2463474127706368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857377874684315,0.0,0.09542528816302233,0.0,0.0,0.10131587219925496,0.0,0.4480797908635672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495557683150426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988101168505586,0.09676685468401026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991565119236147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649839365017868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957572630321808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593001661739554,0.0,0.0,0.10206406502654926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138108665248269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108574954108532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582552049309509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923929214316174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846951094773923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348756892551596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972143542433465,0.10936589525027984,0.07341890836761626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649431269043568
mentalhealth,kazooicide,2020/02/28,"“Stop making excuses for being an asshole.” Anytime I see people trying to talk about sleepiness, canceling plans, being moody, snappy, forgetting ([like this](https://imgur.com/a/finrqYz)) there are ALWAYS people coming in saying you’re an asshole if you’re like that and your personality is just shit. That they’re mentally ill and they’re not like that, so you should’ve be either. 

here’s a few direct replies to that post:
*”None of those things are 'mental illness' those are personality traits.”
*”Stop self diagnosing yourselves. Because these aren’t symptoms of mental illness. You just have a shitty personality.”
*”Mental illness is not an excuse to be a piece of shit person”
*”I wish so many people would understand it, because to use mental illness as a crutch for the way you act is so.. horrible.”
*”Everyone gets like this it’s no excuse to treat the people who go out of their way to try and help you like shit because of your feelings”
*”You're not mentally ill.”
*”Sounds like every other human being. Dont use a mental illness as an excuse to be angry or aggressive.”
*”Stop using your mental illness as an excuse to act like an asshole.”

Maybe I’m taking this too seriously, too personally, just incorrectly, but these are symptoms I (and a lot others) experience from mental illnesses. Everything about my sleep is awful. I don’t have energy. Sometimes I have too much. I get moody. I have mood swings. I already feel bad enough about them, but this stuff makes me feel worse. Like I’m doing it on purpose. I feel like shit. Sure, getting help is the right thing to do, but it’s HARD. I’ve been working on getting help. My mom is a np, she’s hard on me and doesn’t like excuses but she sees it too. She would be the first person to be honest with me if I’m a shit person or if I need to get back on meds. 

I’m just sick of seeing people acting like just because their personal experiences aren’t the same it’s not true. Just because your ex used mental illness to be abusive doesn’t mean every mentally ill person who has problems is in control of it. Just because someone isn’t getting help doesn’t warrant calling them an asshole either. 

Thank you for coming to my ted talk. I’m emotional.",2.6230286063320776,5.348331358851674,3.8847307339916526,83.05151939326073,81.10526315789474,6.045485086022601,23.965387356204825,7.378060373470096,1.3687591774407002,1740,63,307,26,47,567,183,418,0.21,0.6659999999999999,0.12300000000000001,-0.9883,2,0,0,0,0,0,68.0,0,9,4,4,20,28,6,0,20,1,38,21,6,7,2,57,71,20,0,8,22,2,6,11,0,2,15,2,0,11,25,9,0,4,6,0,0,6,14,11,0,1,1,11,32,16,38,59,9,22,0,0,3,0,45,8,5,6,16,199,57,1,0.0,0.061013238038728324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05682609083303832,0.0,0.0428480238628924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03959653063456782,0.0429962329398505,0.18834550220125115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05258222450252102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871688714840592,0.0,0.0,0.057756100311208175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226641262259736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060351839142845726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05792502329632535,0.0,0.053208173354843326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677363576703846,0.04920574666170244,0.04628044896871627,0.1007441202102548,0.0,0.0,0.1041498196496134,0.03678808867397992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04380168068434194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614242938194763,0.0,0.0292658352850904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922589370598046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13806424122007838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767367937752782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043779267481251515,0.0,0.0,0.06874671888563777,0.052207919043873015,0.05173371975268935,0.056093228101563884,0.05719941462328423,0.0,0.5708441125395436,0.0,0.0,0.060310404230216816,0.0,0.0,0.03785480193639769,0.03818294230440158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17850099034823333,0.40467158394360014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049318043013011036,0.0,0.0,0.04927382793354418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04397650886611895,0.0,0.04095094694418165,0.0,0.0,0.12310471236325675,0.0,0.053720589217661485,0.0,0.2642947494616692,0.0,0.0,0.051532259651488894,0.0,0.043631606150050434,0.0,0.05092994147714772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129156554272599,0.0,0.0,0.0589495356661965,0.0,0.0,0.048533494552952285,0.10704619077665277,0.03871788439600909,0.08277957418265056,0.0,0.04740974236071665,0.0,0.0,0.06842207339898364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992354532580503,0.0,0.0,0.0536081844902307,0.0,0.1779008290397483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174878017283617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059216789747291776,0.0,0.0,0.03748902464728098,0.0,0.0524778762143787,0.0731612412738338,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alex_Fierro,2020/02/28,"im a fucking piece of shit. i just cut my wrists but I cut too lightly so its only bleeding and hurting mildly. my parents think im a parasite, a piece of shit who habitually lies. they're not wrong though.

im only a 15 year old with depression, anxiety and bpd diagnosed yet my parents ignored these. i self harmed often and id leave fucking obvious as hell signs but whenever i mention anything about my depression to my parents, they're always like ""oh you'd already be in a mental asylum by then"".

ive started lying when my parents started forcing me to study a lot more than anyone else does that i know of around my age. all my friends agree that what my parents make me do is overkill, even for an asian. whenever i confront them about how stress stacks up because of this, theyre always like ""oh you aren't even doing much, you should be doing about four hours a day"" and compare me to fucking ivy league students. i started to lie, saying i did about 3-5 hours of study every day when in reality i'd just finished my homework to a decent standard for school and just chilled listening to music or chat with friends on social media. i got caught lying countless times because my mum setup screen time on my phone which i can't turn off.

i eventually told my parents that i had to go see a counsellor because of depression, but they were like ""oh its normal for every teenager"" and brushed it off as just minor mood swings. they got a bit better for like 3 months, but the pressure restarted and they've now got into the habit of comparing me with my sister. even when im actually doing my work my parents are like ""oh good job OP's sister at least you actually do your work unlike OP"" or something like ""OP is so lazy, don't be like him"". It fucking hurts because they pretty much disown me every single day saying how im a disappointment or that i dont live up to their expectations like my sister does.

today, my parents kept up the comparisons against me and i was caught lying again. unlike last times though, my mum seemed to disown me completely, call me scum, manipulative and how im not her son anymore. pushed me over the edge.

only reason i cut lighter than i intended was because of that final stray of hope.",5.636189994094321,6.0194248268792725,6.260450518855986,79.1377744031047,67.24601366742597,8.599375685480469,32.20458955538682,8.401726058763845,2.43755725976546,1765,70,334,23,27,577,224,439,0.18100000000000002,0.705,0.114,-0.9884,9,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,5,5,3,28,36,11,2,16,0,23,9,3,7,2,49,46,29,0,4,13,14,0,8,2,1,2,3,1,1,14,14,0,2,4,1,0,4,6,22,0,1,12,7,57,13,48,29,10,43,1,6,2,4,39,13,7,7,34,207,71,6,0.0,0.0,0.11791294985755067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666962432218501,0.0,0.1005404951144804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04621742714504287,0.0,0.059915598341105124,0.04224368012360442,0.06190246440189031,0.04971652371303748,0.053782295465719325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841425844251776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05343229377912547,0.06595770035015427,0.0,0.07609077103404363,0.0,0.06169062665084316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334413910949269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688832816474345,0.0,0.15610644982096852,0.0613201091810975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573941610229284,0.0,0.07080611007764674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504691085346256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971091750363755,0.0,0.15270711779179202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06618184770599495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335319561945496,0.22341134396772686,0.0,0.0,0.03433532406205112,0.050673364467164764,0.14495855210409986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06000587938797989,0.11899351319193005,0.0,0.12935134294230158,0.0,0.39155239912133977,0.0,0.05995271774282442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03320258842909408,0.04924641369202736,0.0,0.06397092440922049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361263389168683,0.0,0.05334768749102263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0513628031294834,0.0,0.0,0.04032758416336127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060884265039069664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04822279921412282,0.0,0.08882417871415693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059194023182195576,0.0,0.0,0.0633955407867704,0.0,0.0,0.13784534018534966,0.0,0.0,0.5366710274245449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061463930857085174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06211684003659231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960891100683987,0.0,0.061143360860386624,0.048143055447676365,0.05499968680841997,0.06302618126646915,0.0,0.12403057397494666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06158564084162085,0.0,0.046510536863250775,0.0,0.0,0.12828647003224805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920535433417634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038711590973741536,0.11871516334681187,0.0,0.1056856857403624,0.0,0.057266501459995775,0.0577292683050623,0.0,0.0,0.06571433847524538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796590273234962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06605448633845974,0.0,0.03890537813364637
mentalhealth,nightmare_gummy,2020/02/28,"i feel guilty 24/7 about stuff i've done in the past and at the same time i feel like there's no way i could ever talk to anyone about it, especially the people who should know the most i don't know what to do",6.855106382978723,3.5821929148936182,6.881382978723407,87.58250000000002,66.65957446808511,10.251063829787237,25.627659574468087,7.1686216300943375,0.7501574468085113,165,1,43,1,2,53,35,47,0.11199999999999999,0.831,0.055999999999999994,-0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,0,1,10,9,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,4,1,6,6,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,29,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179741035895636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24889702210814466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190156886158955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28198441001944724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3152476865760369,0.22270532751842986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34264554738170305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229919276886816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29758871120993224,0.21611952645957727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568648473136172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505627887270844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177663928346705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24744271201429066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GreenCray0n,2020/02/28,"I think antidepressants killed my kinkyness? I have been dealing with depression all my life and over a year ago I started taking escitalopram, which is a big help.

However, I noticed that after I started to take it, I stopped wanting kinky sex? I really loved being overpowered by my bf, getting strangled, scratched, hit, etc. Now all I want is cuddly vanilla sex. It is really quite odd.

And yes, I talked with my bf about this in length and detail, he doesn't mind (he just cares that I am sexually satisfied, the how isn't important to him).

So, yeah, does anyone else here relate? I could really use some insight. Anecdotes, advice, all welcome. But please don't kinkshame me :/",3.1554057142857133,6.004144112000003,4.03454285714286,82.03970000000002,79.88,7.091428571428572,27.32857142857143,8.192908349453996,2.2480971428571426,534,23,94,11,14,171,91,125,0.13,0.674,0.196,0.8054,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,6,5,1,0,3,2,11,4,0,2,3,20,23,6,1,3,2,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,17,3,9,19,5,10,0,1,0,3,10,3,0,1,7,60,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17946866462159408,0.16280191042361886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841808167492955,0.18817952664591603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18725177211602376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14663612597721826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893435368010528,0.15818453604133215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16072052592899186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342285716814189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20482743761333225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595382776983774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310221816444783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20319058386041425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972321602668718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16575869337341198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18544242399962133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209096074671522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20160154888932608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953430995453594,0.0,0.0,0.3529684316887952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599884343754467,0.0,0.0,0.15354647644149588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27617621534229586,0.1476175019764753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768075690580332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862171460586974,0.0,0.0,0.21665272613342604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11826985745896053
mentalhealth,laysaud_,2020/02/28,"I just realized something weird There's a period in my life where i got really depressed because of a friend, the weird thing is that i can't seem to remember anything. Literally nothing before the bad stuff went down and i'm wondering if this ever happened to anyone?",3.80294117647059,6.431963019607848,5.278196078431375,75.38788235294119,75.66666666666667,8.785882352941178,29.807843137254906,9.3871,3.341812549019608,218,10,36,6,5,73,44,51,0.13699999999999998,0.7440000000000001,0.11900000000000001,0.0147,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,8,8,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,2,0,4,1,5,6,0,6,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,3,2,25,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813904437394454,0.0,0.2134781408983234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21660241358920712,0.15813823512761352,0.0,0.22074481552087846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234355381346361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23465758738636802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20042498106653306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20747952524538607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22940165402391585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18323394502927293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24891767058238295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618921472475162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29386896454417266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23616355314023216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997119307669127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29697047467213783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17234517104941138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404822184346005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813267412251119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ryan932020,2020/02/28,"Anyone else have a very vivid overactive imagination Does anyone else ever imagine very specific mean things being said and whispered about you by people you know and mainly do not like? Sometimes I feel like I’m experiencing PTSD but I know better seeing as this started to get really bad 4 years back when I was going through drug withdrawals. It gets really bad when I have too much caffeine, don’t sleep enough and to be honest also when I get horny but can’t/don’t want to do anything about it. Thank you for taking time to read/respond ahead of time",5.273357142857143,7.0882898952380975,5.262083333333333,80.713125,69.0952380952381,7.5357142857142865,25.505952380952376,8.07648339933343,1.5707380952380947,449,13,79,6,8,140,76,105,0.12,0.765,0.11599999999999999,-0.1253,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,2,9,7,0,0,1,0,8,2,1,0,1,14,23,10,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,6,8,5,12,19,3,11,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,12,49,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12479012975898042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822233253293996,0.3197756476659254,0.12841276776009436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11998993410130708,0.2605842014124942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801022717420344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365571249651853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18096410861178405,0.0,0.2607132369400297,0.0,0.0,0.1612374900573977,0.0,0.0,0.1411527669549158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890167267274605,0.11147947219017944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445831751840346,0.0,0.08868467997072621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17151787609241775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247263111349493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16998011279201294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471194867262052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818282170511344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18240971567668315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608847834633865,0.0,0.19993444710431796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14843571799588845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434865788580099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15615894475046566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15433373135704467,0.0,0.1104503389262069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173273598157967,0.0,0.0,0.14366642153886333,0.0,0.0,0.10367019466917053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819836465488108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575089974953447,0.09204012127773127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048866883233967
mentalhealth,Lh9500,2020/02/28,"When things are a little off. Whenever I look at something that is a little of or different to usual I start to nod my head a lot that can often lead to me continually bashing my head into a wall or another kind of object. A way I’ve found to prevent this is to suck in my stomach or stretch myself until it hurts a lot this is not ideal though. This also happens if the amount of actions (like steps or taps) is not either 8,12,13 or20 then I also get really uncomfortable. This can really hinder my ability to do anything since when I’m jogging I get really uncomfortable after the twentieth step and have to contort my body so I can still jog but in enough pain to stop feeling uncomfortable. Is there any way that I could fix this or at least make it more manageable.",5.090784313725493,5.823221248366014,6.418830065359478,76.29373529411767,68.54248366013073,9.518692810457518,29.679084967320264,9.642632912329526,2.713029281045752,613,22,116,13,10,208,96,153,0.136,0.8340000000000001,0.03,-0.9459,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,9,6,1,0,8,0,12,5,4,2,0,23,22,16,0,3,10,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,2,0,2,2,2,0,6,2,3,0,0,1,2,13,3,19,20,7,28,0,1,1,0,0,10,1,9,11,89,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529442568896073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075471090562049,0.1658335799630106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13014359460539507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17566848451794814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626953739195804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16523260685424707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341074884722168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799651583025882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17340280554262671,0.0,0.0,0.1652532125046376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398511142052487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32461410437471816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16930235141452354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16468840717777813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726387585198967,0.31701476901119663,0.0,0.0,0.13280578098731646,0.0,0.0,0.2689061635468803,0.0,0.0,0.10556604470306367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682822588621202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039439311853717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308229321514056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12175124088217099,0.0,0.0,0.11193905702660008,0.0,0.1262984253808839,0.13222009528160256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506752578445476,0.0,0.1553811181700661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17417937296924332,0.0,0.0,0.2510634841061328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheFloppyMudkip,2020/02/28,"Do I have a mild depression? I am extremely unmotivated to do anything other than play video games and watch YouTube. I have had breakdowns due to stress. And while probably less than most depressed people I have had nights where I just get the feels and am really emotional.

I would like to know if there's a name for this so I can do research into it and any suggestions would be greatly appreciated.",4.920833333333332,6.852724855263162,5.4973684210526335,78.20991228070176,70.1842105263158,9.27719298245614,29.771929824561404,9.725611199111238,2.9166824561403515,323,13,60,8,6,104,56,76,0.154,0.715,0.131,-0.4353,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,3,0,14,0,0,0,0,13,17,7,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,7,3,7,12,2,5,0,2,1,0,3,2,0,2,4,46,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18225552292262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22054882830406736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4616720562556648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014744034814909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355135611726371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14002380409842313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954812131737669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14729090909424514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093581240824925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515085843210457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18580391175950667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889593684497493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169362835033425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070037619458065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38077225205697385,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gabi_Social,2020/02/28,"Does anyone have experience of using photography as mental health self-therapy? I've read quite a bit online about it, and I understand the difference between self-directed therapeutic photography and paid-for phototherapy.

I just wondered if anyone had any experience of using photography for self-therapy? How do you find it? Did it help?",7.3242105263157855,10.384143877192985,8.729684210526319,52.77978947368422,66.36842105263158,12.981052631578946,35.96140350877193,11.979248473330829,6.167746666666668,279,14,37,12,5,96,42,57,0.0,0.929,0.071,0.5661,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,3,0,10,8,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,6,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,23,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474005502317255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23595549612352498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842060382020469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17628366367496254,0.0,0.0,0.14765401779168855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3300945029165321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15421329911832465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17934876892856555,0.0,0.0,0.11309406191888835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700369963196296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17946179138623114,0.16877252625744465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5280567587620507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3859077527752653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17565061836491366,0.0,0.291451677813834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18297708917327765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Camillo32,2020/02/28,"Don't know what to call this but maybe someone can relate and help me out. Feeling numb but that's about it. I don't feel the other depression emotions that come with depression I just feel nothing. I see a lot of peoples post about how numb they feel but then say something that comes with this numbness. But for me I just feel numb, I don't think I have depression because that implies being sad or despair but I don't feel sad I feel just confused",1.7529670329670315,4.208795560439563,2.352406593406595,94.40509340659342,82.4065934065934,4.958681318681318,24.48461538461539,6.2581,0.620695824175824,360,14,74,3,10,111,55,91,0.376,0.5770000000000001,0.048,-0.9902,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,6,11,0,1,2,0,7,4,0,1,0,27,19,9,0,0,9,0,7,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,9,6,0,0,9,0,0,2,4,11,0,0,0,9,11,0,8,18,1,5,0,6,1,0,4,1,0,3,1,50,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669621243605264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17872444407681515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015444189711714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4522573359315441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968843593955589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6195003708753177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731842363269912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619150397818227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14880361788995308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17584041737111858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16794529569723105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134325076193535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676296486854461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919029284634232,0.0,0.0,0.13947565923984084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830172414962092,0.13474607563392454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121516825444089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,christhe102,2020/02/28,"A short movie about literally falling apart hi all,

I recently completed work on a short film dealing with mental health in an off kilter way: depicting a person that's literally falling apart. I was hoping there might be an audience here that would enjoy watching it. Please let me know if there are any communities you know that would get something from watching this, I'd really appreciate it. And feel free to share however you'd like, I just hope it can lift some people up in a rough spot.

 [https://www.kcet.org/shows/fine-cut/assembly-required](https://www.kcet.org/shows/fine-cut/assembly-required)  or,

 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8PRxpopZZY](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-8PRxpopZZY) 

​

Thank you!",14.85294372294372,18.57412078787879,8.042886002886004,62.58909090909094,48.19191919191918,10.505627705627708,32.324675324675326,10.608840637214634,3.7490796536796536,614,18,74,12,7,152,76,99,0.03,0.732,0.23800000000000002,0.9688,1,0,1,0,0,0,60.0,0,3,0,1,5,7,0,0,6,0,9,1,0,0,1,15,16,3,0,5,3,0,2,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,7,2,0,0,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,7,8,9,9,2,13,0,0,2,0,7,9,0,6,2,46,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21481082415540365,0.24090333568393205,0.1348212117493446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078681578462231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043937358443801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002444383181781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035808333244164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21073737804831186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3938268570281285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21791316416984247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20273069338024946,0.0,0.09685810672393133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19979591156202192,0.2103188057462814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744608739138495,0.17310992001598507,0.0,0.21762609078544304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700818418359586,0.0,0.19575436609861707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15262753198825849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825279394529309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15736677373406466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433308599116587,0.0,0.0,0.2816714445720465,0.0,0.24090333568393205,0.0
mentalhealth,kekiica,2020/02/28,"My friend refuses to accept that she might have anxiety disorder Okay, so a childhood friend of mine (F24) (let’s call her S (F24))moved in with me 5 months ago because she got a job in the city where I'm attending university. I've noticed that she's really passive during the day when she's not at work, but I didn't make much of it in the beginning. She rarely goes out, she takes a lot of time to make herself go to the supermarket, every free day she has, she spends sleeping and doing absolutely nothing. She has no interests or hobbies, she doesn't watch movies and series, she doesn't read, there is absolutely nothing that comes to mind when it comes to her activities. Although she does sometimes go to the gym for quick cardio. 

S is a reporter so she works a really stressful job and she does nothing to relieve herself of stress she endures. Two weeks ago, we (me, S and another friend, let’s call him B (M25)) went to Germany for vacation cause she took 10 days off and it was supposed to be a super chill trip, but it was everything besides that. The day we arrived was Friday and even though we planned to go out, B and I were super tired because of the flight and decided to stay in to have a good rest so we could have the energy for upcoming activities. S absolutely did not like that idea, the whole night she was throwing subtle tantrums because we decided to stay in and it was really weird for me and B but we really had no energy so we just ignored her behavior because we did plan to go out on Saturday (which we did and she got super drunk, ended up with a guy from France and came home at 11 a.m.). Every day since then she was pissed off, did not like any of the suggestions we had. We visited some of the attractions S wanted to visit but she showed no interest in anything. Her behavior really started to piss me off so I just went my own way and had a great time. B stayed with S until the end of our trip but he also told me that she was pissing him off too, but he just decided to ride it out. I really couldn't let her ruin my trip cause I was really looking forward to it. Also, three days after we arrived, she told me she just wanted to run away from her job and was disappointed because the trip was not what she thought it would be. In my opinion, she was clearly running away from herself.

Anyways, when we got back, she went back to work and had an attack. Her heart started racing, she couldn't hear anything because of the drumming in her ears and she started sweating. Bear in mind that she was complaining about heart palpitations and lack of sleep for the past month and a half. She got scared and decided to go to the doctor. Her blood test results came back normal, her EKG was normal and she keeps moving holter monitor placement appointment. Our friend B is at the end of his journey with depression and anxiety and he told her that she is showing classic signs of anxiety disorder, but she absolutely refuses to accept that she might have it. She keeps telling us that she just wants to get her life in order and if things stay bad after that, she’ll visit a therapist. That makes absolutely no sense and what does ”getting my life together” means since she has absolutely no activities besides her job? I think she's in a clear state of denial. She keeps taking heart palpitations medication and tells herself that it will help her in the long run because she started changing her diet to a more healthy one.

I have absolutely no idea what to do, she is super stubborn and refuses to accept the fact that she might be suffering from something more serious. I feel responsible for her and I can't let her ignore her mental health which she obviously does.",6.3215952380952345,6.4173312388888935,6.763492063492067,77.10500000000002,65.77777777777777,10.246031746031749,33.11507936507937,10.01380297108016,3.1452996031746023,2932,115,563,61,42,956,290,720,0.115,0.746,0.139,0.9618,5,0,1,0,0,0,69.0,16,0,0,9,26,40,6,3,33,1,57,20,11,6,4,121,102,50,0,11,18,0,1,2,4,6,7,2,1,1,30,52,2,9,13,6,3,29,16,19,0,4,37,5,106,22,85,49,9,101,0,4,2,0,110,29,3,8,40,396,136,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404187245648478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483967327695982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036072222814657946,0.05562200508292496,0.1217371773704464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730255575820102,0.0,0.0,0.060346017137848686,0.09967450519741916,0.1223643267140634,0.04429011844060233,0.2263489465981265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832916243360066,0.1213380374143051,0.0,0.10898306113980848,0.056114271311025456,0.09138664415046104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042351885861721394,0.0,0.0,0.20525670390766648,0.0,0.04568733230549675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158766996173935,0.05429350993819383,0.1856791380546434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14094560970814438,0.0,0.0,0.035035531682752766,0.0,0.08938491451147076,0.0,0.047673166371951986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02682099996005364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16392885015081002,0.0,0.05542734485954446,0.0,0.15073265986500625,0.04449138733416897,0.1696988061184924,0.05848198171571953,0.0,0.05252260408303753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05638404786383671,0.0597852450558974,0.18857471565663994,0.03555475199771317,0.0,0.053208170656554685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976204536451085,0.0,0.0,0.21055476500365472,0.14144573057028556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169672456758054,0.07493409693094659,0.0518299333141627,0.0,0.0,0.046942900475985816,0.044544198025309456,0.0,0.0,0.04509671683796077,0.0,0.0,0.10622327051676388,0.0,0.0,0.057781241435953236,0.0,0.05343696627029609,0.05345659296344355,0.1688161690112425,0.10712007457661694,0.0,0.0846795653193162,0.11275626725712425,0.038993966370357694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04977886841475765,0.10394510966302116,0.15269349398332713,0.06039175564415896,0.0,0.0,0.035944469334268016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050637179280608985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053059066172852526,0.0,0.23787260341284086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05310700995684206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775826703749254,0.0,0.10616603955370847,0.0,0.0,0.04083641045867219,0.0524625760436133,0.0,0.15018127933558828,0.22615441862996005,0.0,0.0,0.12152507565489958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976604313534794,0.0,0.09272683181857384,0.0,0.0,0.06158899849617449,0.03524054931779691,0.03398890929081072,0.05211615974625722,0.042111575795564966,0.06186159572383872,0.06096709270061217,0.0,0.1520594851172549,0.05893462626741752,0.0,0.0,0.05181697545756328,0.0,0.06380625673619061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386143558776774,0.04210442297694774,0.04254926797413268,0.0,0.0,0.14751893703539934,0.0,0.059222526076867885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585154523933798,0.0,0.0,0.03768144113709476,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,acidfinland,2020/02/28,How are you doing? Whats good today or tomorrow? It cheers up to have positive ideas.,-0.03372549019607973,2.151441705882352,2.5847058823529423,86.62450980392158,102.52941176470587,6.972549019607843,17.43137254901961,7.793537801064563,1.3742313725490205,67,2,13,2,3,23,17,17,0.0,0.5660000000000001,0.434,0.8738,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4945527980385143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6656193275001258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5588993118716079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skosasha,2020/02/28,can you go to the emergency room/psychiatric ward if you’re struggling with severe paranoia? i cant calm down and i feel like just fucking giving up i can’t take this paranoia anymore. if i go to the emergency room can they admit me or give me something to help? i see my psych on monday but i seriously cannot wait that long. it’s so bad.,1.486358148893359,3.559322183098594,3.3234607645875265,89.30056338028173,80.69014084507046,6.310663983903421,24.227364185110666,7.447530270364453,1.1125758551307845,269,10,57,4,7,90,53,71,0.27899999999999997,0.628,0.09300000000000001,-0.9115,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,1,0,2,6,1,1,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,10,15,6,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,0,2,11,2,7,15,0,8,0,0,1,1,6,4,1,3,3,35,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659306232322887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238922622126312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558361474952146,0.19156488446833872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478983753123151,0.0,0.5144637216295742,0.3047892161477306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179733857967728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100349952326626,0.0,0.0,0.2373024176145764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21367912687143936,0.0,0.0,0.3029307560810389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20643332283017773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803263639838937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20161381899750566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NightmareFire404,2020/02/28,"Needed to take this step I saw my ex bf today, trying to get the last of my stuff. He blamed our relationship failure on me. The last year I fell into depression. Despite volunteering and stuff, I was still suicidal- I legit attempted suicide multiple times without anyone knowing. It was hard explaining to him that my memory was going due to all the stress over every fight. He would literally cry over spilled milk. He couldn’t believe I was sexually assaulted in the military but my advocate can despite everything I told her. It was hard explaining that to everyone. I should stand up for myself more when ppl
Inappropriately touch me and stuff too but it happens so quick....But yeah fuck my ex...I want to to be happy again..but better this time...stronger..",3.657880952380953,6.522484264285716,4.907142857142858,76.50452380952382,77.78571428571429,8.59047619047619,27.904761904761905,9.21078282632365,3.01474761904762,607,26,104,17,15,200,97,140,0.182,0.73,0.08800000000000001,-0.8548,0,0,0,0,1,1,25.0,1,0,0,2,4,7,3,1,4,1,10,2,0,0,1,15,22,6,2,5,3,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,10,3,1,0,3,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,7,4,18,2,16,11,2,18,0,1,1,1,13,6,1,0,8,68,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065290606374575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17165014352554606,0.0,0.1347442279493623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16735308886984954,0.0,0.0,0.13122178599826367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12836433570981487,0.1455802313110902,0.1369254390623998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14084829102836188,0.07959837900993005,0.0,0.08658596524522931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472563497859985,0.16218305921689555,0.2729574960018902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372946073197643,0.2483767595543317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11296813786872575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16357056712171142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166964598697695,0.0,0.1745203392964514,0.0,0.5232246812735996,0.33329984887711583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11455081872853826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17767702043325526,0.0,0.14441323740443124,0.1455802313110902,0.0,0.10343797821632324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986200034494042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686326975830738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822750542611828,0.0,0.0,0.09811061380532003
mentalhealth,luttleslugunderarock,2020/02/28,"I was close today. I had a crisis this morning. I got bad news and was accused of doing something illegal which I did not, and now it's not sure if I get y monthly disability welfare. I seriously wanted to end it all. I almost went to the place where I wanted to do it (not mentioning explicit stuff, don't want anyone to get ideas). But I didn't. I held onto some thoughts. My loved ones, and how devastated they would be if they found me, or my good bye letter. I gritted my teeth and went home. Crying and with raging thoughts that I can't do this anymore, my life is over, etc. 

I'm home now and save, so please don't sorry. But I just don't know anymore. I fell so low in the past years, if I fall lower I'll start digging. Haha. Joke. Goddamn.",0.5188122171945722,2.647468852564103,2.738823529411764,91.77088235294121,84.83333333333334,5.209049773755656,20.714932126696826,6.522977012572876,0.2589212669683261,575,18,126,6,17,195,101,156,0.22,0.6629999999999999,0.11699999999999999,-0.9446,1,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,2,0,7,10,1,0,3,1,15,3,1,1,3,36,31,15,0,7,10,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,8,8,0,1,5,1,0,4,8,4,0,1,12,0,22,6,9,17,3,19,0,1,0,1,6,7,0,6,9,83,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899246589884225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31492870554219016,0.11102073472525137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13257235940432938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17440933744925982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062950295748738,0.0,0.17707858830414352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17409104324955108,0.0,0.0,0.16590910438412693,0.0,0.0,0.13317481189337865,0.12698865970181195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185330259609813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17924017230112435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725981617587428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214905694247684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330265399850242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12673447444908326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759156387380547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515708371792528,0.0,0.0,0.1658884169496757,0.17428972452725236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223447294163928,0.0,0.17773811571290138,0.1123833444167734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18176194737781395,0.0,0.0,0.14964566528475096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521027785888383,0.0,0.0,0.1505022537958499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28095278159248543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29437617581793085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279079246535588,0.0,0.0,0.1022473338620813
mentalhealth,Jan_u_ary,2020/02/28,"Improving mental health & getting motivated again Hi all.
I've been in a work slump for a while and decided to take a break and work on my mental health because crying in the bathroom at work ain't it. Luckily, I was able to get two weeks off from work, and I would love to do something that will make me less stressed, less anxious and more motivated to get back to work. Any tips, any advice? Therapy is not an option, neither is going on a short holiday (financial reasons).

Thanks in advance,
hope you are having a better day than me.",6.339428571428571,6.2518926095238125,6.855952380952381,77.07821428571431,65.76190476190476,10.047619047619053,33.6904761904762,9.725611199111238,3.102619047619047,424,17,81,8,6,139,77,105,0.079,0.713,0.207,0.9437,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,9,2,5,0,1,7,0,10,3,0,4,1,14,19,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,4,1,0,2,3,1,0,1,2,0,6,4,15,15,5,16,0,0,0,1,3,8,0,2,5,54,8,7,0.15030262184303886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14687398252784326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16285282797116046,0.0,0.20442187389957095,0.0,0.0,0.16979918074224035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557343857013325,0.0,0.09162308321701773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293045480716026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16510037242717746,0.0969327568630928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355807492031304,0.0,0.08542044371867859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195293171033796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492844172312889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13565398441949136,0.0,0.10032816719921446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029393825276906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545361281209624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571030141649125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721711455016504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300886623388175,0.0,0.0,0.1383784603989696,0.17188414708089542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14682382171551253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056369712809566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5471104939865941,0.0,0.0,0.1067706701644016,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TehDidi,2020/02/28,"Am I ill or not? Hello, 

It's kinda weird to talk about it, but I have no idea how people usually feel, what is normal and what is not. I don't like myself very much but I'm not ugly in the eyes of society. I feel like a useless piece of shit for not being to able to keep friends because besides my bad feeling and complains I have nothing to offer. I'm terrified of the feeling that somebody could romantically love me even I'm so desperate to have a relationship. My feeling spin from 'I cry because nobody loves me' to 'I hate myself for crying because someone has to feel for me'. I think it's a fear of commitment. I don't feel good about things I do when they aren't 100 % perfect and even when I manage to something right I feel like it's not a big deal and I would forget about it. 

I have little experience with mental health care in my country (Czech Republic) and I don't know if this stuff is serious enough to see someone or you just talk about it to your friends.",2.4313169446883265,4.104579611940299,4.0500321919812725,87.08486391571556,76.26368159203979,6.719461515949664,25.753877670471176,7.510576382923642,1.2683617793386015,766,28,160,10,17,256,111,201,0.243,0.573,0.184,-0.9489,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,1,11,18,2,1,6,0,17,6,2,1,2,37,36,14,0,4,11,0,8,3,2,1,2,0,0,0,12,6,0,1,11,0,0,0,10,8,0,0,0,10,26,10,25,33,3,8,0,1,2,2,14,5,1,4,6,112,38,1,0.12116293847346153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011659926460193,0.22157940809905802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353369086024076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673874725302467,0.0,0.26618359707962946,0.0,0.12491366931936387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251937043381112,0.0,0.16005395629366664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11852060317212244,0.0,0.1363419910846601,0.4901089778491493,0.17311765490988149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18722037141386466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162572425485984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962331730191245,0.0,0.1287905377628548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13677820953297912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769518681595512,0.0,0.0,0.06658798230042821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758227468513896,0.12143709499645056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218708564978502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221037441539845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906870096437433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187139543763191,0.11625910724780762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399912570079833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13008365195659166,0.0,0.10347248743328773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655117494482264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12437201518479685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20532192915993447,0.09327714952246743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870257657305884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947723607488613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049527250434325,0.07763631862876573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344385895750574,0.09997211345003963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607067515701354,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heheha-er,2020/02/28,"Anxiety Does anxiety feel like mental illness to anyone else? I always doubt myself and have almost no self confidence whenever i’m very anxious (which is more and more recently). Just want to see if anyone else feels the same way or i’m just mentally getting worse, which i hope i’m not.",2.9353333333333325,5.666866927272732,4.290454545454549,80.62901515151516,79.72727272727272,8.03030303030303,25.53030303030303,8.841846274778883,2.5127575757575755,231,9,40,6,6,76,41,55,0.245,0.601,0.154,-0.5994,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,14,11,4,0,3,5,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,3,2,2,11,3,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,2,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19090436853671103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863269305810207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916872420764057,0.21537564515811564,0.0,0.2666081457053513,0.3906785867256332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683554541479587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185204367244548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927926294267442,0.13619749647002186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960463418151708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893544334707368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313997559312333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38425253096331097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882398644507852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15192012987432565,0.0,0.19888529206234504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573028652196143,0.11244791392121864,0.15132587204637066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194284498545242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZzzZura,2020/02/28,"I want people to hurt like I hurt This is probably terrible but whenever I'm mad or upset I tend to project my emotions onto other people so they know how I feel. I want them to feel my pain, my anguish and how tortured I feel by my mind and thoughts. I've done petty revenge things but no one ever suspects it's me bc I'm always super sweet and nice on the outside. But when I'm alone is when trouble usually starts. 

Does anyone else feel this way?",0.2744326241134765,2.6279166914893644,2.403297872340428,91.78416666666668,89.53191489361704,4.835460992907802,21.663120567375888,6.42735559955562,0.5123929078014182,355,13,73,4,12,119,64,94,0.3720000000000001,0.4920000000000001,0.136,-0.9851,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,1,6,13,2,2,1,0,3,1,0,2,1,20,16,12,0,2,4,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,9,0,1,2,5,13,4,6,14,0,8,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,1,6,43,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970821161036001,0.0,0.0,0.1583357722855286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305456092965667,0.1949736670043332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16652327095180647,0.194731812997314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15896212301904986,0.2140496216961776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17212738231874175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3848635395739084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4074168275702037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104577911115578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296564082657896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921377424517144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894481671727098,0.0,0.20248101538202054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638450001891065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20516383078616046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346876021329295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12641962051355482,0.0,0.0,0.1510682873667515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20957655629232094,0.0,0.22447487903507468,0.1510426278173774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CardboardboxIsmyHome,2020/02/28,"I hate my Yearbook photo and people have been making fun of it I hate my yearbook photo, it's absolutely horrible. It not because I hate the way I look, my hair looks absolutely horrible. It is pulled back in a slick ponytail and my humongous forehead is exposed for the whole world to see. I tried talking to my school counselor about it but she said she couldn't help me and I'm just so scared. A couple of kids have already seen the picture and they have continued to laugh at me for the past few months. I know this is just a silly picture but I can't help but feel anxious when yearbooks are passed out. I've been bullied multiple times in the past and I don't want it to start up again. I want to get this out of my head but I can't. I just want to disappear",1.7324528301886808,3.7070007358490566,3.164125786163524,91.25713207547173,79.37735849056604,6.252578616352202,24.436477987421387,7.3011,0.9713451572327044,603,22,131,8,15,197,89,159,0.23,0.72,0.049,-0.978,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,8,7,3,1,8,0,13,3,3,1,0,22,30,11,0,4,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,8,7,0,0,2,0,0,3,5,4,0,0,4,7,22,3,18,25,2,20,0,0,4,0,8,7,0,0,9,88,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18472790477402845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18911214237945526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287187633922496,0.0,0.1020442942235642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852227523299042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464148107158011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745856917647325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4958127373987838,0.17179868804256052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22440676132144816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199758744613153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811443942897948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173949460244786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361552208716007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196007500079279,0.11605272670963768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592338741309745,0.0,0.16759464541683974,0.16941575803694858,0.1333945684063165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184851975235924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345482072818988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761114595495053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11365228395138885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962071114233539,0.1328727760240449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18689393860825865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Addictedtoyu,2020/02/28,I don’t know what to think about this So while I’m in school I’m sometimes think I have a “influence on the world” it’s like mind control but with events so one day I thought hard enough that my friend would give me a doller and at lunch he did I though hard about doing lsd with my sister and it happened If I think about it hard enough it will happen like this “this and this persons gonna do this and this” type stuff and other days my life feels like a movie like every one else is a side character and they don’t really have their own lives I know I’m wrong but I can’t stop thinking abt it,0.06697674418604649,2.2271077906976764,1.0275658914728678,103.01297674418608,87.3720930232558,4.370232558139535,14.801550387596901,5.6839178017228535,-1.1232040310077522,471,8,116,3,15,145,79,129,0.092,0.784,0.124,0.7227,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,2,1,6,6,0,0,5,0,11,2,0,2,0,24,26,13,0,2,3,1,4,4,1,3,1,0,0,1,15,8,1,2,8,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,2,4,13,5,9,21,3,10,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,9,71,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663763443348613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19133454011831855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12391934879132024,0.0,0.0,0.3065505227608474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498316390626325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07500535079008393,0.10597439362532088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460740584326835,0.0,0.0,0.14230160473625555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623538076334742,0.0,0.3986515172645296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16304798145965851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477719389311983,0.2898864572868561,0.0,0.13098726895235074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14978149178340766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20103855452038075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952509379952115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503064277407117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150128379135794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671242404695184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401919584237142,0.0,0.0,0.16981423938825016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38020209061951793,0.14574366538988115,0.11776568806434765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537674639174932,0.16218691333117705,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ehothi,2020/02/28,"Life doesn't get better or worse... I feel like no matter what happens, our life stays the same. We can see anything with a positive or a negative perspective. There are a lot of events which I thought could end up destroying my life. Those events happened but hey, I am still here and happy. I had a lot of goals, I thought achieving them would make my life amazing, better than even, I achieved those goals and I didn't really feel any different after a while either. After losses and successes I did not feel like any of those have impacted me permanently, all the emotions that I had were temporary and were there when the events happened. I feel like we should not be scared of anything and try our best to achieve what we really desire, without worrying about failing and without having a lot of hopes for success. We should not let small things make us sad or angry because there is nothing that could hurt us permanently. These are just my thought, I would really love some constructive criticism.",6.628709677419355,7.643245150537634,5.998010752688174,79.66701612903228,65.23655913978493,9.640860215053763,32.704301075268816,9.725611199111238,3.0633204301075265,802,32,145,16,12,245,110,186,0.11599999999999999,0.605,0.278,0.9916,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,8,0,1,12,9,18,1,1,9,0,22,5,0,2,1,46,38,12,0,8,11,0,4,3,0,4,4,0,0,0,10,11,0,0,7,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,9,5,24,12,15,21,8,12,0,4,1,1,11,2,0,8,12,112,34,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492695775744005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18063227883335228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669035004276863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151774362191728,0.19413257942822715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17525529670130266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466696614671792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345567403266712,0.0972072598640076,0.0,0.0,0.07248983575603116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22197463986241367,0.23521949712747905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057340632955760334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911586874429654,0.11683252078585918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109008011097201,0.0,0.0,0.11749125894584235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222835253289527,0.3100829425531382,0.16085712872337812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27992042133009554,0.09905502069964284,0.0,0.14651996727119326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530953166910087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109288785746561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988040553015288,0.0,0.0874577420749327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698050432367835,0.08764769583468776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291402497131162,0.0,0.0,0.2613913132950331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451406946174363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640351008739253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21159307389521975,0.0,0.0,0.1114579835516902,0.11184616269735688,0.15592864431529235,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TranquilAlpaca,2020/02/28,"Anxiety and depression wrecks my relationships Finally deciding to use Reddit for something productive, so here goes: my mental illness wrecks my relationships. Because I have GAD, my brain always tells me that the worst case scenario is reality, so I often get upset for seemingly “no reason” and never get a chance to explain myself. I’ll start arguments over situations that I only assume exist, I can come off as clingy or obsessive because I’m constantly texting a S/O to either make sure they’re okay or that they still want to talk to me. 

If my depression gets bad, it usually causes me to do the complete opposite. I’m distant and, when I do talk to them, I end up saying destructive things that I don’t mean because I guess, subconsciously, I want to push them away. I’ll be locked away in my room for days, often without showering or eating, and just mindlessly watch TV or stare at my phone, or sleep. 

My social anxiety keeps me from ever wanting to go out and do things with them, because every time before I leave to go to a social instance I visualize a fast slideshow in my head of all the horrible and embarrassing things that could happen and, a lot of times, I’ll just go back home and go back to my room to avoid it entirely. 

How and when do I explain this to someone so they understand that these behaviors aren’t who I am, and instead something that has happened to me and I’m working to improve?",10.466283422459892,7.386739558823535,10.365401069518716,64.78975935828879,59.661764705882355,13.86149732620321,42.741978609625676,12.079253325248375,5.0882235294117635,1128,49,202,27,11,376,156,272,0.166,0.799,0.035,-0.9875,2,1,2,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,5,1,17,11,1,4,8,1,13,5,3,5,4,50,39,24,0,5,10,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,15,14,1,2,8,1,0,6,5,9,0,0,0,3,34,2,34,37,4,33,0,2,2,0,17,11,0,12,16,143,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991028010661152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16532330841164633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20304215178310345,0.1661749989682579,0.09022127507025993,0.2634769017418701,0.0,0.09194670729391782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062493347588772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110020822170542,0.0,0.09307967386341648,0.11329344029908972,0.11676889113248368,0.0,0.08627299448745057,0.0,0.0,0.06968643042466964,0.0,0.18613494478180664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056707371574104,0.0,0.0,0.09570451281345346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774178592054238,0.09104086016485033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836879176780775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936257690392992,0.0,0.2456402149565841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190345846758148,0.0,0.19110507021880754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108954361269894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838781131796554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604410355032122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441447002549135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186435796191897,0.0,0.0,0.07212744246031759,0.0,0.0,0.11770339436968418,0.0,0.0,0.10889386047909994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333855132093458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218057233783492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109836848661436,0.0,0.23202091213368645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592954303246174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836906494423532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214581636085002,0.10813287246613383,0.22029659640368374,0.09155451236223187,0.1663717845241236,0.0,0.0,0.07648176946913683,0.0,0.0862927320533024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184040467704504,0.0,0.0,0.1737007691576124,0.09444468985917104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21536049612682695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12601528829891667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248889561270392,0.0,0.09332468529554756,0.11900713659350255,0.0,0.19120062661404594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041610064936162,0.0,0.07866520793925748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fiorecheyenne,2020/02/28,"Fiancee is locked up for a DUI that happened 5 years ago Im mad. Im mad that 5 years later a cop SUDDENLY realised he closed a case ""by mistake"". (FYI: NO ONE WAS HURT, HE STOPPED TO HELP SOMEONE ELSE) 
Im angry that i have to put $20, $30, $40, $100 on my phone so i can talk to my fiancee for 15 mins a day which is consistently interrupted by an automated message letting you know where the call is coming from.  Yeah bitch.. I know, thank you for robbing me, have a good day. 

Im upset that i have lived with the love of my love for over a year, and suddenly im alone again. 

Its like ive been broken up with, but i know im loved and cared for.  Just abandoned in a different way. And not by choice.  

Its hard for me to comprehended.  It is simple on paper. Its confusing to feel. Not sure how to cope",-0.963385579937306,1.0715462873563233,1.803740856844307,96.21761755485895,91.87356321839079,5.0027168234064785,18.828631138975968,6.574015621080383,-0.0468528735632181,610,19,149,8,22,211,106,174,0.16699999999999998,0.7020000000000001,0.131,-0.3666,1,1,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,2,0,0,5,16,3,2,10,1,12,3,0,1,1,21,23,6,0,1,4,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,2,4,0,0,2,3,8,0,1,2,2,13,8,25,20,0,23,0,2,0,3,14,8,1,1,13,81,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166635601382308,0.0,0.0,0.11878494183289474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711199391260385,0.0,0.11693477845948592,0.0,0.0,0.0987958539788588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14793198383239076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198273360646826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580933526472507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05799104716566113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619708978800988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142057781412958,0.0,0.10274030984380582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687473633099562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277873081905966,0.0,0.7433136064883376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18909297303779032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727897725782675,0.0,0.05603206651301654,0.0,0.10127395994955003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105384136286386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771736399137698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529579783442025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717702973172708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588653289110598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809459608104313,0.0,0.0,0.09218401350918233,0.0,0.1055917567443379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103611283604947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22157108727114244
mentalhealth,vrbeagle,2020/02/28,"I need help with my mother. Can someone help me figure what is going on exactly so I can help her? My mother , age 65, has always been an highly dramatic (for lack of a technical word) person who has really overreacted to the most minor of obstacles eg. lost cell phone, bad food at restaurant, a broken refrigerator. I am not sure if you would consider this anxiety or PTSD because the result of her nervousness is always very loud, mean, and sometimes violent outbursts. 

For example, tonight she had an issue with iCloud where she thought her photos were going to be erased from her phone. I tried reassuring her it was going to be alright but it did not help at all. She screamed extremely loudly, I am surprised  neighbors did not call the police. The issue is the new iphone had something on the screen that said like ""bring your old phone close to this one to sync"". She thought my phone was too close because I was sitting across the kitchen table with it. I told her that's not how it worked, but she said she ""didn't trust me""

I told her to stop screaming and then she made some horrible comments about me and how she believes I am against her. I confronted her and told her this reaction to a technical phone issue was 100% inappropriate and did not match the problem at hand by any means. She then threatened to punch me. At that point I walked away.  Then she claimed she was going to the hospital because she had a rapid heartbeat/ breathing problems and  I was ""giving her a heart attack"". Which I honestly think was just a panic attack she was having but not sure?She kind of calmed down after I left the room but was still yelling from the other room. I put on some music to drown it out. 

She refuses to see a mental health professional. I don't know what to do. I don't know how to talk her down from these episodes. When she screams like that I do get very defensive and tell her to stop because I don't accept that sort of thing in my life. When I hold her accountable it seems to make things worse and fuels the fire...so I give up and forget about it. She never sincerely apologizes or wants to talk about what happened and often attempts too place me as the ""aggressor"" so we never get back to a true baseline. Then the cycle repeats a day later or a a few days later . I really think she is shortening her life span with these pointlessly  stressful episodes, but I am not a doctor. I don't know the proper approach to take with her.  Maybe instead of trying to calm her down I should just accept her for who she is because I don't think one day she is just going magically be a calm person, this has been going on for twenty years now.",4.841375968992248,5.984827905038763,5.1844961240310115,83.42155038759694,69.36821705426357,8.213953488372093,28.09302325581395,8.515128840125781,1.9205837209302328,2093,71,408,32,36,664,245,516,0.157,0.753,0.09,-0.9889,0,0,1,0,1,0,54.0,1,2,0,3,21,31,5,3,30,1,47,9,3,6,6,83,82,31,1,8,19,2,1,2,1,2,4,8,4,2,27,19,2,5,14,0,1,10,15,15,0,2,28,11,75,16,60,49,6,62,0,1,2,0,72,26,0,10,27,297,102,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367184791745518,0.0,0.0,0.055867970634305014,0.0,0.06284807274358492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869255205412307,0.0771869862022405,0.06317184505718798,0.06859569062719333,0.2504035221351903,0.0,0.0,0.09256014323113572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083889070224139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15894883391754866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408875256857726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993417136473346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08584481446738618,0.15762042841079413,0.2801422421314252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264907453263515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732653783176482,0.0,0.0973536408777168,0.2202660868141538,0.08680088501529626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25724429100096863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855514125554985,0.1354501205563645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926125391592146,0.0,0.11605649999326186,0.08027321208486736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968149152566561,0.0,0.0,0.0777367043235588,0.05483885840546655,0.0,0.08253537560171519,0.17898096917086995,0.0,0.0,0.0827925515218899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060916622654194084,0.12672544207067446,0.07934546073851027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620747205338956,0.0,0.11134021696143176,0.0,0.0,0.09639076578298318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346852105053798,0.0858341103593816,0.0,0.07766268706818785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722178553062358,0.09603437473283534,0.08258810184973621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052607288158427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629574677942207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654666094107433,0.07479049637622921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960935766683032,0.06324665358266908,0.08125303707687175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06560879955081496,0.13736991101447735,0.0941078595697292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15485954697790616,0.0,0.061770063053745064,0.1320655711589333,0.07180677419949766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915978117231112,0.15792412316044924,0.0,0.13044321066651418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23550683008495635,0.0,0.11155521204463288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557235956870586,0.04845693369155949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05980955448393877,0.0,0.08372259417725132,0.058360297276996764,0.0,0.0,0.05290489293976941
mentalhealth,KendraOokami,2020/02/28,I think I need help. It’s getting bad again. I feel like so many people are walking out of my life physically or mentally. I’m dealing with abandonment issues and I’m afraid of being taken for granted. All I can think about is the negative. I don’t know why my brain is only processing the negative thoughts. Everything I think of something positive I can’t remember word for word. I feel like a burden to talk about it over and over again. I don’t know what to do I can’t afford therapy anymore. And I feel like a burden crying to my friends. I think I need help.,0.9437515527950318,3.4008623130434827,3.1074844720496912,87.41402173913046,86.7391304347826,6.763975155279502,23.866459627329192,7.957251820313856,1.6519937888198752,446,18,90,10,14,151,65,115,0.18899999999999997,0.635,0.17600000000000002,-0.5574,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,1,4,0,10,2,1,0,1,23,26,5,0,2,1,0,3,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,11,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,2,3,16,4,14,23,1,6,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,5,57,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16161542212724106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606722696584836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18192050808661545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17900710985533444,0.0,0.16800760957178826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14646055999178365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471968387650577,0.34926221687221976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259047437953604,0.0,0.08514139698262926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184612134770121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17009094404841776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17912031234790182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151055261712383,0.2388463459182517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16521881765537771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16422828892030678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416698729874807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394064016239455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297796623866845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18460521484624492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545681352833893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130983418061347,0.0,0.0,0.18636229553311084,0.0,0.0,0.4176802228241212,0.0,0.12937435128671418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470486834263363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arpizzabread,2020/02/28,"Got diagnosed today. Clinical Depression. 

I want it to get better. Tips on how to start the journey?",1.4916666666666671,3.4302576111111134,3.865000000000002,75.36750000000002,111.7777777777778,8.466666666666667,26.722222222222207,8.07648339933343,3.804622222222224,79,4,12,3,4,27,17,18,0.16899999999999998,0.639,0.192,-0.128,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,3,3,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873144905144757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3771894348410758,0.4444908718301616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22880093701375576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35025352511848457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099699031315786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4151074990007245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25830312296042923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FuckUsernamesMan47,2020/02/28,"Not doing great tonight. I decided to sit down and design my first tattoo.  It's a tattoo related to a good friend who took his life last year. 

Just a lot of shit coming back up. 

I think all 4 of my roommates are home, and if anyone is nearby I instinctually swallow any emotion and tell some jokes. I've almost cried numerous times tonight, but cant. 

But fuck. He killed himself 6 months and 5 days ago. I really looked up to him. He invited me to move in with him our 2nd or 3rd time meeting/hanging out. If i had said yes, he might still be here. 
I was so close to asking him if the offer still stood, but then he did what he did. And here I am. 

Then november last year, someone I went to high school with, one of those people I'd been hoping to run into one day, died. As well as a great uncle I was fond of. Then my grandma died December 10. 

Besides a classmate a few years after high school graduation, and a great aunt I never met, I've never lost anyone. And now I feel like I'm just waiting for the next phone call saying someone died. 

I can vividly remember everything about that phone call. I was at work. My buddy called and asked if I was alone. I said I'm at work, in a grocery store. He told me to find a quiet place, it's bad news. I went to the back room, expecting to hear a friend was in the hospital or something. But fearing the worst. I called him back, he asked if I was alone. I told him I'd go to my car and call him back. I was now having a panic attack. 

I got to my car, called him back, and I dont think I'll ever forget it. ""Um...---...killed himself."" And I just sat there. I cried, but it was silent. That morning I was in a good mood. That whole day I was in a good mood. 

I was finally in a good mindset, and listened to a podcast that interviewed Daniel Kyer. A youtuber/musician who killed himself some years back. And then I got the call. 

I dont know. I guess I just need to put my thoughts into words.",0.6558746846089178,2.601810401477831,2.5714586086747566,94.26382734590895,82.91625615763547,5.537330289559053,20.000961191877927,6.697824305789354,0.12265824822780225,1477,41,339,16,41,492,202,406,0.17800000000000002,0.718,0.10400000000000001,-0.9898,0,2,1,0,0,0,69.0,1,0,0,4,21,26,5,2,22,1,26,4,1,0,4,62,59,32,5,8,17,1,1,1,2,1,1,6,2,0,12,20,1,1,8,1,1,10,6,10,1,3,29,9,52,14,39,28,7,66,0,1,2,1,47,19,2,14,37,213,64,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059125124265795415,0.0,0.06678996189666052,0.13816123095471772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04535797939257308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327574863524137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870652188603764,0.0758803641191236,0.0,0.3077270085627906,0.05569133595801423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4767538667865134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745575402202072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465326414909412,0.1290470702882258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20767079880751468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15634274537912304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502801320488596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033355915883697,0.0,0.0,0.059945252306409916,0.0,0.0,0.07505553429647646,0.03372529521474271,0.047650169922141036,0.0,0.07306609382489432,0.0609621778729061,0.05673460086445033,0.0,0.0,0.10306380958546356,0.061662656701608726,0.0,0.0,0.037906889825300674,0.223777662964556,0.10669144219938502,0.22060945912270324,0.07347707113029606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517523738857068,0.0,0.0,0.14094346757472448,0.0669050842959372,0.06624770031934724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475863334665587,0.0,0.03665632685516253,0.1087380666477008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04711186280172653,0.03258602968912329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0560108210262462,0.0,0.07281043500117032,0.05670556992062437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075767924891675,0.0,0.0,0.05323894230832988,0.07089106308904633,0.0,0.049456869180021165,0.10288560555709307,0.0,0.07093572524910492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039467890391294,0.0,0.0,0.07825754754253171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04624106784530917,0.0,0.06968683065910518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705146758045764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04272943794332623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555758479728583,0.0,0.1268930870600619,0.05304215714101503,0.0,0.13500700558378942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846612681069078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130286199672202,0.051348570160706715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653268927473876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05829834424642656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547675340717688,0.0,0.052951990148714864,0.07778608483459963,0.0,0.0,0.12746855159313109,0.07410565125086452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05997090332111747,0.12366229717245622,0.0,0.07446766258826591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711612965213694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718092865363444
mentalhealth,dreamersdisease01,2020/02/28,"Emotional Rollercoaster I can literally go from suicidal panicking to bliss enjoyment within a few hours, it's crazy how quickly it can come and go.

It's more of a statement I needed to get off my chest but I'd enjoy your comments all the same.",2.7006250000000023,5.249076145833332,4.624833333333335,79.00350000000002,79.20833333333334,8.840000000000002,28.35,9.3871,3.128245,197,9,36,6,5,67,39,48,0.126,0.6709999999999999,0.20199999999999999,0.5927,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,2,1,1,1,1,8,7,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,6,7,4,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,26,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3435111532349105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4485705527605926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20834457081172025,0.0,0.4532684205814124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39271510650712055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956881596385613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4361974127466275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trgreb,2020/02/28,"I don’t feel real anymore. About two years ago I got really depressed and suicidal after a really toxic relationship. My depression has gotten better about 6 months ago. But I’m the last 6 months I’ve just not felt real. It’s like I’m not in my body anymore, that I just always tunnel vision and watch as my body is just on autopilot. I just don’t know what to do anymore. My hobbies help me focus and bring me out of it, but they do always help 100%. I wake up and half the time don’t feel like my mind woke up just my body. Does anyone know anything to help?",2.608436911487757,3.7677486949152548,4.4233333333333364,86.70179849340867,74.76271186440678,7.278342749529191,21.58568738229755,7.793537801064563,0.7953133709981168,438,10,94,6,9,149,69,118,0.064,0.789,0.14800000000000002,0.8348,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,7,5,0,0,3,0,7,4,4,0,0,22,18,7,1,0,9,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,2,0,2,4,4,14,3,12,14,0,14,0,2,1,0,5,5,0,0,10,55,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369843669303337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22245166347793294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39770018550470304,0.09346658681385447,0.0,0.11000068569099808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822204198491328,0.0,0.4454384515011327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230263035822982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169772885062738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517718288548433,0.09549532024962,0.12834610506842553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690972831127207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687926188658758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692529650694708,0.10896054006537458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061079722951938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13497063805708595,0.0,0.21339146759779548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042960543944442,0.17126744215819398,0.0,0.0,0.143513727809003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14621549778860904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794523182584312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057814358957395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08608040048154841
mentalhealth,krangbrain,2020/02/28,"I’m tired of feeling better Heads up - this is a new account I’m going to use on mental health subreddits. I need to rant. Let me know if this is the wrong subreddit for that.

I had a really bad problem with alcohol and I’ve had a really successful recovery so far (90 days in one week). I’ve lost weight, I’ve gained muscle mass, I’m eating well, my heart rate is a steady 50 bpm resting, my depression is better (I think the pills work better without booze) blah blah motherfucking blah. 

It’s great. People tell me it’s great... but I don’t feel fulfilled. The exercise and diet restrictions have been a great distraction, and I’m about to start a great new job on monday. But I don’t know what is enough. What “recovered” is supposed to look like. What sober u/krangbrain is supposed to do now that krang isn’t in control.

I fill my time, but I still just feel like I’m going through the motions without being enthusiastic about anything.

Maybe the pills aren’t working? I don’t know. I feel depressed right now and needed to put some thoughts down.",2.2718040293040294,4.618348634615387,3.4199725274725274,88.1845512820513,79.48076923076924,6.654212454212455,23.847069597069602,7.793537801064563,1.282085805860806,828,29,166,14,21,267,121,208,0.127,0.6890000000000001,0.185,0.8937,2,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,9,8,18,0,1,11,0,19,12,2,2,0,28,41,9,0,4,7,0,5,5,0,0,6,0,0,0,9,5,5,2,9,1,1,5,7,7,1,1,5,6,14,11,20,34,3,24,0,3,1,0,1,9,0,2,12,91,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848791869821028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123780023435166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257307403076462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941705039971224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435181838644895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715029473660052,0.0,0.19098692641596726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344922683126983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11455990058269501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22423985324952447,0.07920662400891995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602166055844508,0.0,0.0,0.488944894567909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11378614866907072,0.11785122327124095,0.0,0.13138326506715864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100228591302707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18279623578524748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133736237527449,0.0,0.1083324322136612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310413895072736,0.0,0.1210293427806621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138532706463644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117323979269542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644196294872,0.0,0.21416077726723454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512939991660338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686434026529053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608905499819828,0.0,0.11145648358798046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205424789962415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468365790493742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847542058740138,0.0,0.0885421256401701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690658061900588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104198242826767,0.0,0.0880195890400056,0.0646500650961713,0.1274304830226032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957573808842164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893443216700188,0.13501162188902865,0.09968679647087407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21375234517010264,0.0,0.16143154954383634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122058380261792,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,an0therthrr0waway,2020/02/28,"Day Dreaming I have a problem, I'm addicted to day dreaming. Ever since I was little, I'd imagine scenarios in which I'd spend time with my favorite tv show characters or imaginary groups of friends, but for the past 3 or 4 years it's been really bad, I'll spend and average of about 4 hours a day walking around my room imagining things, commonly, about a group of really close friends. They dont exist nor do they bear and resemblance to my current group of friends, I just made them up one day and they've been appearing in my day dreams for about a year. I wouldn't mind this that much if day dreaming was all it was, but the thing is, while I'm trying do something else, like study, clean or work. I'll get the stong urge to walk around in my room with music playing and day dream for literal hours. I get different day dreams too, with characters and plot, I often made stories about them but they've been getting weirdly violent and sexual in nature. Does anybody know what's wrong with me? Please help.",5.790433333333333,6.002161710000002,5.8370000000000015,82.89933333333336,66.9,9.866666666666667,31.66666666666667,9.725611199111238,2.7401166666666668,802,30,163,16,12,253,117,200,0.09,0.736,0.174,0.9443,2,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,4,1,10,10,1,0,7,0,12,1,0,2,2,33,21,15,0,3,8,0,0,1,3,1,1,0,3,0,8,13,0,0,3,9,2,3,3,5,0,1,8,0,16,5,25,12,2,32,0,0,0,0,11,11,0,6,19,90,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325654724008287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165053160670376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153361951017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6273921982370813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270494957123224,0.0,0.0,0.10641580796120413,0.0,0.14251808247576184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015838967107258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099970854343663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818510666257376,0.0,0.1905980094964755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150808325237731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395093772072922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682995621362732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05940919683264356,0.12187838497203875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23012783708700896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278459932941363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939236750856654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240149724988882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608404482008194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348383218187249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635787033280172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15580428874221616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059145028260036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361610913803556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16157556817379834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090782259862008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256061241277082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852860132350115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13295404480708292,0.0,0.15661698922653192
mentalhealth,deadly-dull,2020/02/28,"I can't go five minutes without breaking down this year has been so hard for me. last month my dad passed away and i was the one who found him passed away in his bed. when i touched him he was cold and i assumed the worst. the feeling of his skin is forever etched into my nerves and i don't know how to get over it. i remember when the police and paramedics came, i was completely numb. the thing is all of those emotions are hitting me now. like it didn't feel real until the funeral a few weeks ago and seeing his belongings around the house and looking through old pictures of him is really hurting. this whole thing stresses my family out emotionally and financially which adds to the emotional part of it. to top it off, this week my partner broke up with me. he was there for me when i was dealing with the loss of my dad, but it got overwhelming for him. i've started slipping back into old habits and ive been high for a few days straight and like im nonstop crying because i miss him. im trying to give him space before i reach out but its painful not having that support system. i feel so alone. at least im visiting my dad's grave tomorrow. i wish i could turn back time. i feel so emotionally drained and i haven't eaten anything in 5 days and the self harming started again and i just want to die and be with my dad. im tired of existing.",2.4836853188928987,4.28477829963899,3.5228023465703977,90.36280761131172,76.47292418772562,6.782731648616125,25.982099879663053,7.645422480735847,1.2721673886883271,1067,40,229,15,24,343,161,277,0.185,0.755,0.06,-0.9893,0,1,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,0,2,14,14,0,2,12,0,20,5,1,1,1,42,42,23,3,3,5,4,7,2,1,0,3,0,1,2,15,23,1,0,8,0,0,5,6,11,0,2,12,10,37,3,35,27,7,47,0,6,2,0,21,18,0,1,24,156,52,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791066415896988,0.0,0.0,0.10271306593495466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161072784923823,0.08828477839067272,0.0,0.0,0.1863521370371776,0.15251545508129624,0.0,0.06045479136763397,0.0,0.0843887106557906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113427212561865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398074747839717,0.0,0.0,0.07918137564118817,0.0,0.10893661530863903,0.1279164460983658,0.10224275643373563,0.0,0.0,0.10292566302564778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4462240073589301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349124789558308,0.0,0.20057890029674166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10873780776028326,0.0,0.0,0.05181367163255391,0.09513554395719606,0.05636216248379075,0.0,0.07931751231220946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883930956509634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478146132650312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443204485306545,0.10616648608347258,0.0,0.4284943770116981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054502752924104496,0.08083903228167794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690159802106256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328013746526805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915874741178268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20813024884310866,0.0,0.0672020258524602,0.0,0.1055268042310722,0.0,0.0,0.10739443007512683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288030763072895,0.06353260674515664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234339959974922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902784632829782,0.0,0.10345881293719113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14038997380389726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136020565491686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125400678829493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177194434481218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057828431356816826,0.11398449373989936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673317912286534,0.10787147999427812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058494660771123676,0.0,0.1591008051786641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072284004124723,0.11404377469470968,0.09559899747695642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06386400314437296
mentalhealth,teddyboii93,2020/02/28,"Who doesn't want to shake away all these negative thoughts? Me: I can't shake away all these negative thoughts?

Friend: You need to be responsibility for your own thoughts. Don't you have control over your mind?

Me: it's not I don't want to, it just doesn't go away. You think I want to be stuck in this negative loop.

Friend: Maybe you need to do some charity volunteer to build your character.

Me: (I'm thinking) what's my thought got to do with volunteer to build character?",1.025384615384617,3.626742127659576,1.9172340425531933,94.19576923076927,90.48936170212768,6.722094926350247,23.188216039279872,7.882392219407189,1.3689846153846164,376,15,83,9,13,117,50,94,0.17600000000000002,0.703,0.121,-0.6694,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,7,0,1,1,4,0,2,0,0,10,0,0,1,2,19,25,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,1,6,0,0,3,9,2,0,0,6,0,14,2,15,17,4,8,0,0,0,0,10,5,0,1,0,55,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.50110305868969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19940038971087345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747116662559287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103900591655413,0.0,0.1421904739390453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17860838637468554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951162439881468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636498494455296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22783420726517165,0.0,0.5645640115120553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31458564302461545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ViragoLux3,2020/02/28,"Embarrassing Memories Idk if this is the place to post this but lately I’ve been having more moments than usual where memories are coming up and I hate myself because of them. I know everyone has these thoughts but they’ve been getting me really down lately and my response to it normally is that I just tell myself to fuck off. So I’m wondering what response would be better and healthier to tell myself, other than just forget about it.
How do you deal with these moments?",4.238666666666667,6.591248144444448,5.055277777777778,78.85625000000002,73.1111111111111,8.055555555555555,26.805555555555557,8.841846274778883,2.381888888888889,383,14,65,8,8,124,65,90,0.156,0.804,0.04,-0.8834,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,1,1,6,4,2,1,1,0,10,1,0,1,0,17,18,8,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,0,10,1,12,13,1,12,0,0,0,1,5,5,1,2,5,54,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200592992331878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19151951326922453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18653732185354505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22325195134466105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20692133137457386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20019555978821885,0.11313763147412954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137967698770784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190093691561254,0.0,0.4885521850912546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212171511018497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262470483744565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207393563016155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13872648708431307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37854579369218655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191528676781218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23849753249227984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348375651071944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15382981131735093,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,keikwalk,2020/02/28,"A Borderline of Everything - dealing with an almost personality disorder Hi, I’m pasting a link to my blog where I’m talking about what it’s like to have mental illness in India, my journey being undiagnosed and also not on meds ever / emotional wounds / a labelless life 

Http://terriblelady.tumblr.com/post/611129711609905152/a-borderline-of-everything",19.235800000000005,18.17721378,15.4,29.18000000000003,41.2,16.400000000000002,51.0,14.554592549557764,7.745799999999999,299,13,31,8,2,90,44,50,0.10400000000000001,0.813,0.083,-0.2551,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,2,3,0,0,1,6,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,3,22,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538779977290054,0.0,0.0,0.2027513034701932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26138275044753784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905722949942235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851919843211381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22933630683619075,0.0,0.0,0.4557205962314622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17907878755630746,0.12386406185127925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816194734177485,0.0,0.25550296185209737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420271956890128,0.0,0.22137638825674205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428157944410896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037812820690451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,toofooly24,2020/02/28,"depressed and don't know what to do next my biggest fear is breaking down and letting people around me know that I'm not okay. it's what drives me to wake up and go to work every day. but recently everyday life has just been getting worse for me and my anxiety. I recently met with a counselor over a month ago but have only spoke with her twice, I told her I'm depressed with anxiety but I don't think she understands how bad and difficult life is for me. I just want to live a normal life. What could I do?",3.0130188679245293,4.209781009433964,4.16051886792453,88.83341981132078,73.81132075471697,7.941509433962264,26.45754716981132,8.472884824447931,1.6165320754716983,401,14,88,7,8,131,66,106,0.237,0.75,0.013000000000000001,-0.9745,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,1,3,1,11,4,1,1,0,23,23,9,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,9,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,5,0,1,4,1,14,1,13,17,0,15,0,2,0,0,6,5,0,0,7,59,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987227801490675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759394917311781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16055263340787676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505874339523715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399739805422868,0.0,0.0,0.11631292874966945,0.0,0.3106759872516826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195539529191002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029475522395712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422713154838043,0.0,0.10249891064223678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19823486379999405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18442342179469776,0.3821665115042329,0.0,0.0,0.15925522774243625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14395624688540165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918077319758742,0.0,0.17670789655986455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716677689884654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250342379161506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3561541612196357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556308298898058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233526332090815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18775409819093866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637702215829016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13129931710317136,0.0,0.18379537410751032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Milestorrence,2020/02/28,"I'm tired of feeling depressed. So I was recently diagnosed with depression and anxiety and I'm struggling with it really bad now. A little backstory, I have always been a pretty happy person for the most part. The only thing I ever struggled with when I was younger was ADHD and it was treated with medication which I eventually stopped taking. Lately I've been feeling down and anxious all the time for no apparent reason. I will be totally fine one minute then all of a sudden I'm just laying in the fetal position crying my eyes out. I have everything I've ever wanted. A son, girlfriend, and the only thing I'm missing is a good job but I'm close to getting one. For some reason I just can't shake this feeling that I'm a failure. I'm always letting people down or making them mad because I tend to do things that are not wise. I always seem to upset my long term girlfriend who used to adore me, now it feels like she hates me. I hate feeling like I'm better off dead. I have never felt this way before and it concerns me a great deal. I have a baby boy to support and I'll never ever leave him behind but I don't know how the hell to cope with all this negativity in my head. I feel light-headed just thinking about it. 


I don't know what to do or who to turn to. I feel like life isn't fun anymore. Like I have this voice inside my head telling me that I'm never going to be happy so I should just jump off a bridge or something. I hate that I'm no longer able to be the Happy go lucky person I once was. I am taking medication for my problems but I don't know if it's working and I have serious doubts that the mental health system even cares about me or my problems. What can I do to ease the pain and finally find happiness and peace of mind? Help me please!",2.589800181653043,4.130459610354226,4.324869209809265,85.84432470481381,75.51226158038149,6.746194368755676,23.94995458673933,7.42949916751922,1.0470073387829242,1395,43,285,17,30,471,184,367,0.218,0.593,0.18899999999999997,-0.9073,2,0,1,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,1,2,16,37,5,5,18,0,31,10,3,5,10,69,70,23,1,5,13,1,8,4,2,2,7,1,0,3,23,17,0,1,16,0,0,4,12,18,0,2,8,10,40,19,34,56,8,33,1,3,1,0,14,9,1,10,22,195,63,2,0.07915649342462047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513072265845443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19759363087128826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060554500808984515,0.08942430656974988,0.07850197149294116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609236564061889,0.048253063687639285,0.0,0.06735634575312892,0.0,0.0,0.07000748584986922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070532055014118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694969112436364,0.0,0.08160686897082117,0.13635474359495914,0.08034217459489311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228211736429242,0.21480474029202745,0.0,0.0,0.07114075224988849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801673102339863,0.16964824415629232,0.07600264708344542,0.0867120694078403,0.0723476009493133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04135600075058042,0.0,0.08997291875063725,0.06639271113017836,0.0,0.08727031344761421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370542366380912,0.0,0.2344519483120852,0.24371219670769945,0.08413965098586386,0.0,0.0,0.05305692899525302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855060567663094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050701599508688,0.0,0.08929197239714035,0.08381529724129423,0.0,0.0809428775431849,0.05591057224143142,0.1546874573533856,0.07933560156843666,0.0,0.07005100577120613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052837574021179015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15948367887967188,0.0797711275660702,0.0,0.07992549337910337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18315110271629276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429908210874522,0.10727697706134864,0.12040416035525375,0.08422808995154514,0.0,0.0,0.08571876863489095,0.0,0.054877145808620895,0.13823279370019162,0.0,0.08689005953138165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053061108590792,0.0,0.1514841477788341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050709676605666935,0.16277211747174594,0.07815748774629211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206109870379443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060938535874645774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617837289613131,0.0,0.1655031072894619,0.0,0.0,0.08982585069137311,0.0,0.0,0.11903166381632052,0.0,0.06918626421679548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776417085077596,0.05072028478737888,0.0,0.0,0.04615678787555408,0.0909787448010168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609953448669923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836579530765492,0.0,0.0,0.04668855069586773,0.06283074004897289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05762686996241032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,e1cep,2020/02/28,"unsure on how to get help/if I rly need it Hi everyone!

Yesterday I had something along the lines of an anxiety attack and I kind of had a ""oh shit I really should seek help"" because the moment was so trivial it shouldn't have sent me into the spiral that it did. Basically a lot of things happened in the first year of high school regarding friendship/trust and I get triggered extremely easily/spiral very fast to the point of extremely self destructive behavior and I just feel like I can't understand or process any type of relationship in a manner any normal person would?  I just feel so stupid about it considering it was just like run-of-the-mill ostracism but it genuinely has a huge impact regarding my ability to trust and just my self-esteem in general, even though 2 years have passed. I was wondering if it is worth it to try and talk to my school counselor to get to the root of the issue or if I should just try to resolve it on my own because I feel like in the larger scheme of things it feels like non-issue. Thank you if you read this far! I hope you have a lovely night/day wherever you are.",4.7553544494720965,5.6838079140271525,5.586769230769232,81.24989743589747,69.40723981900453,9.513242835595776,27.85550527903469,9.725611199111238,2.437327360482654,883,29,176,20,15,289,124,221,0.061,0.759,0.18100000000000002,0.9837,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,4,0,2,11,14,4,0,14,0,17,2,1,3,0,37,32,15,0,10,11,0,4,4,0,4,0,0,0,2,14,7,0,0,7,1,1,2,2,4,0,1,7,4,21,10,25,21,2,19,0,0,0,1,12,11,1,8,10,115,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724454602004354,0.0,0.09699533296026948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14424390687078814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15458213398536474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177018215753687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374474752279727,0.0,0.0,0.12115493974230952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564388507418443,0.2717401301014972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784898805435024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19873035079727075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212151567953448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699716594139733,0.13396243314659328,0.0,0.12593280522832276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26467526707427186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203408448016354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24777615586491594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077938020150341,0.11443449433759922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940144675758854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898545753814255,0.12422898336154545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070965553223573,0.0,0.0,0.11985917565844532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682605021314194,0.0,0.0812260344146785,0.0,0.0,0.13612687673849486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25664001703734857,0.0,0.0,0.264542871154227,0.0,0.13014989759380866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761047483353397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019103966752618,0.0,0.11673279786610018,0.0,0.0,0.16846959434820885,0.0,0.12457223938624025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17216653531873166,0.0,0.0,0.1319946714001108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10461646302366724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750023190353844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006921324600857,0.0,0.0,0.16329944521470255
mentalhealth,otneal,2020/02/28,"Friend Never Coming I have a friend who absolutely never comes to anything I invite him to. Every single time but everything he asks me to I come to, so honestly I’m just wondering if there is something I should realize about it. Honestly I am tired of it cause they are my best friend and when they say no to coming it really hurts every single time.",1.9955434782608703,4.629051652173917,4.020126811594203,81.6023641304348,83.20289855072463,7.507971014492752,20.219202898550726,8.472884824447931,1.6169550724637691,280,8,51,7,8,95,49,69,0.19,0.598,0.213,0.4595,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,2,1,5,7,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,2,14,12,5,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,0,1,10,6,7,11,3,9,0,1,0,0,10,0,0,2,5,40,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192903091884515,0.0,0.16123720923311688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18099779299563315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771753429187467,0.0,0.5942743705750846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906287034829479,0.0,0.15500591581176978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3997522633698979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846338941336494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26604071047542205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048941168305404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13715595193842706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277668934815998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011385865150468,0.19823017344195995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870375654650946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,androgynousfuck,2020/02/28,"Can I get some reasons to not look at a supremely effed up drawing I made during an extremely low point about a year ago? About a year ago when my ex girlfriend and I broke up right after I got into a pretty traumatic car accident my mental health spiraled. I like to draw and along with a few related digital drawings I drew myself buried underground without a casket rotting and being eaten by worms. I’m going through a pretty intense detox to get clean from weed to get a new job and I am absolutely miserable. Basically it’d be super cool if another human would tell me not to look at it and I don’t want to share something so disturbing with my friends or current girlfriend.
Thanks.",5.4519817578772845,6.477345873134329,6.331592039801,76.18695688225542,67.88059701492537,9.239137645107792,33.54560530679934,9.444778638647367,3.2311386401326714,553,25,98,11,9,183,95,134,0.149,0.657,0.19399999999999998,0.5458,2,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,4,11,0,2,9,1,7,3,0,2,0,19,19,9,1,3,5,1,0,1,3,1,2,0,1,1,2,9,1,0,1,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,3,3,13,7,21,12,2,18,0,3,2,0,7,8,0,3,9,64,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33069253825093786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19559140586008886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441114636834065,0.0,0.29236034249415194,0.0,0.10600845046155176,0.0,0.1491838886966152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19827108306017985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185100763790372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112840778966973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132739390351482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764977856955019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18797686553410797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18015039674240885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632973275590394,0.0,0.0,0.3795331046044785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191782373975761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592943278807073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14359875951942772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16303413882066706,0.17173039058965098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001934765019478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980682680733698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250450133630778,0.0,0.0,0.24023648899396555
mentalhealth,aPec5,2020/02/28,"[US-NY] How relevant is the experience of a counselor/therapist for Career counseling? Hey guys, hopefully one of you could guide me on this.

Recently I'm exploring the decision of getting some help in the form of a therapist/counselor/clinical social work (unsure if there is any difference between them).

In what do I think I might need the help?

-Personal Stuff. Stuff that I don't feel comfortable talking it with friends or family. Might be considered borderline legal stuff. And sometimes that thing eat me alive.
-Isolation. I'm immigrant, since I moved here doing social stuff have been basically impossible to me. I went to some classes, workshops, but at the end I feel unable to connect with others. In a personal meaningful level I mean.
-Career Guidance. I went to school, I finished a bachelor that then I haven't been able to use I'm earning minimum wage. And in top of all of that, we could said that my parents and siblings are (partially) financially dependents of me.

Therefore, my two questions. First, how relevant is the age of the therapist/counselor for career Guidance?

And second, One therapist/counselor is enough for so many things? or I'll be better looking for more than one?",4.552782241014796,7.507923223255815,5.3450845665961975,74.14730972515859,74.90697674418605,9.490486257928119,33.49365750528541,9.800150414767053,4.223790697674419,963,51,152,30,22,312,131,215,0.009000000000000001,0.889,0.102,0.9409,2,1,0,0,0,0,43.0,1,1,1,5,5,4,0,0,11,0,18,1,0,5,1,33,33,12,0,5,4,1,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,3,15,7,1,0,8,0,1,4,2,0,0,6,5,4,19,4,27,22,6,18,0,0,1,0,16,8,0,10,6,116,34,9,0.10154597045758333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905474207085849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980915882397288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621523890791226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609392617008978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390687875742402,0.0,0.0,0.08993958938455741,0.10492413243161634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993314442515556,0.09572850358747446,0.0,0.10268938755675476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637495059643734,0.0,0.0,0.07845416487985797,0.0,0.05305357840871749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054647578774023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612824700105494,0.0,0.0,0.10085806113067547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852730401781911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295167577369592,0.0,0.11061333104962937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21544845495769774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107927296195752,0.0,0.0752950504099784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20643053283728985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275478303774712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17733204918578258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375472679957932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026439522970776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659347169841463,0.0,0.0,0.10276994338369998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399987610961747,0.0,0.0,0.20702665779181165,0.0,0.0,0.1004315613062912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4649833660534243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816188045608093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.471610793424974,0.1349252612504362,0.06506655762264249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099195657930457,0.0,0.12214729943490454,0.08770311480802691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18826826391944768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392667589979178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnaT1muS,2020/02/28,"Need an explanation on the actions of my friends in high school In my freshman year of high school I had suicidal thoughts and occasionally tendencies. Sad, right? Well, it was admittedly selfish, as my driving intention was to stop being mean to other people by just disappearing, instead of solving my problems and becoming a better person.

This is where the fun begins: all my friends straight up told me I was being selfish. That I was scum for wanting to off myself and I should stop being so weak and fix my problems. They said these things to me while I was in a suicidal state. Now, I'm no expert, but I do believe those are the words that drive people to kill themselves and cause the person to be charged for promting them. But everyone else sided with the people against me, treating them like heroes for standing up for themselves or something.

So I really don't know, people in my high school probably still think they're justified, and it makes me sick. Im over it and not suicidal now, so I'd really like to know, was I really such scum for running from my problems? Don't sugar coat is just because it's a subreddit for help, I've been over it for years and just want an explanation for everyone's behavior",6.066108726752503,6.924197613733909,6.47143347639485,76.33218597997141,66.42489270386268,9.646809728183117,33.98826895565093,9.725611199111238,3.3066797711015727,976,43,176,20,15,316,130,233,0.174,0.703,0.124,-0.9333,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,3,2,13,17,1,0,10,0,19,3,0,3,1,36,33,16,4,7,7,0,0,2,2,1,2,1,0,2,12,9,1,2,6,0,0,5,4,8,1,0,11,2,24,9,33,17,1,33,0,1,0,0,11,17,0,1,11,126,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635215575884952,0.12021302294695732,0.0,0.12263335971404528,0.0,0.09626637668989912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181591099835167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909277493023469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20801605529645076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818993269982316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295788801242599,0.34500867600205737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175734999744492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042314170703435,0.0,0.11963899203008055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635434809584396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265625586114012,0.0,0.0,0.11856635484827364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070871368318734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018433772301558,0.1900821037592599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735553739048585,0.312455800738904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20919063600195908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295479207878107,0.10353847707815944,0.0,0.0,0.3304770987188237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083795782382757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692540044617494,0.18200202725764614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3571830418006717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231314820560612,0.0697447991723573,0.0,0.0864124050455261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10400802764822537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840162887815662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09786657638695496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018787223167067
mentalhealth,TsXlils,2020/02/28,"Can't get to sleep  I am asking for your help. Why do i find it hard to sleep, every time I try to go sleep (around 23:00) I end up lying in bed for like an hour and then I finally give up and open my eyes and end up staying up until 4 or 5 in the morning, then I finally sleep  . It's been like this for the past week where i can't get to sleep. I try research why I can't get to sleep and it just comes up with the same answers ; turn of devices 1hour before , don't eat big meal, stay relaxed , don't think. And i try them all and nothing helps. I'm starting to get really frustrated to the point where I stay up a whole night and day  just so the next night ill fell tired and go to sleep. I don't know what to do, I'm starting to think I got insomnia but I just don't know. I need your help pls. ps  I'm a years old 16 male",1.5798477992595643,1.8885638502673807,3.334438502673798,96.77686137392021,76.27272727272727,6.823364870423695,21.336487042369395,6.67199483983844,0.011391114767585364,628,13,168,5,13,211,97,187,0.066,0.86,0.07400000000000001,0.3097,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,2,1,0,7,4,1,0,8,0,11,13,8,0,1,26,32,14,0,1,5,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,1,1,5,12,2,0,6,1,0,4,7,1,0,0,2,2,19,3,25,30,3,40,0,0,1,0,9,14,0,1,21,89,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08329817915283655,0.0874764123638853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796221734575435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060327722268275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060345663419717865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574666653310464,0.0,0.0,0.16575256568011007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883774604997931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20500528507168567,0.08552235379776033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19554829636048354,0.0897619921441215,0.10635730402449754,0.0,0.07483741219016042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382138867949546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881563476914881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214875354478548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028485353908866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142829397425772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06938183659647669,0.0,0.0,0.09951400037417124,0.17562040790381356,0.0,0.08978406082603382,0.0,0.09818720209354546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932426914833863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845500011378789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994408725008345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6554712188123483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246031085257334,0.2992032501481238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991325443806715,0.0,0.0,0.05456210145277495,0.10754629453988214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905860458852885,0.10177856284899864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505714809911708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16886685293605658,0.1044688692002322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060256765348570274
mentalhealth,brain_sludge02,2020/02/28,"Please some one to talk to Is there anyone else suffering like I am in my last recent post just please contact me and we can talk this is fucking horrible
@brain_sludge Instagram",3.5331818181818164,6.626745272727272,3.360833333333337,85.66125000000002,81.12121212121212,6.936363636363637,26.431818181818183,8.07648339933343,2.1444000000000005,146,6,25,3,4,44,29,33,0.168,0.659,0.17300000000000001,-0.2006,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,1,3,5,1,4,0,1,0,1,4,1,1,1,3,17,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885689765170286,0.27632261966740485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22528596263996986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493180539137501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198280500152464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175373786085906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18274452183872514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5920630061199483,0.0,0.0,0.2582822495170511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662799254334733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4335227703239971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tangerineastralplane,2020/02/28,"A friend just told me she wouldn’t want to be around me if I was unmedicated. My friend just came over to help me with filing for health insurance, since that’s what she does for a living, and I was just laid off of a job I absolutely loved. 

Yes, I have mental health issues. I’m not quiet or shy about them. I’m very open and up front with everyone. But this friend will just say whatever comes to her mind. Sometimes. And she announced in front of my partner and my partner roommates, that I have to make sure I pay my insurance, cause she didn’t want to be around me if I’m not medicated. 

That really hurt me, the worst that happens to me if I don’t take my antidepressants or anxiety meds, is a bunch of panic attacks, a lot of crying, probably some self harm (but not to like lil myself), though I may feel suicidal thoughts. And if that happens, I’d bring myself to the psych hospital. Like I did a little over a year ago. 

I just didn’t know what to say. It’s not like we’re best friends, but sure is best friends with my partner. And I’ve never heard her say anything quite like that. 

I’m in bed now. And trying so hard not to cry, since my partner is having a rough headspace day. And I just needed to go somewhere to talk about it until I can talk to my partner tomorrow.",4.139933155080215,4.521573037878788,4.9929857397504485,86.92491978609631,70.51515151515152,8.332976827094475,26.89304812834225,8.313332769828598,1.4717449197860957,998,30,222,14,17,325,136,264,0.125,0.754,0.121,-0.2778,1,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,3,13,19,1,1,10,1,18,4,0,2,3,52,39,20,1,8,20,0,3,4,10,3,3,5,1,6,11,16,0,0,3,0,1,6,10,5,0,0,9,8,35,14,33,25,6,23,0,1,0,1,27,10,0,9,11,145,46,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353612254338853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072165616705991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683304936881876,0.18786835315754544,0.0,0.12004296185453107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214711140221028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206854908382472,0.0,0.10839695867012483,0.0,0.0908951738497326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318150749161678,0.06805094974561557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234028500903306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082781398178728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335351739536325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4076181336988473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05996881251358757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18661999833167756,0.0,0.09452419254988656,0.0,0.0,0.2243232752697256,0.0,0.0,0.07072708258540343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11296014593118515,0.0,0.0,0.11013429848962687,0.10471120888511276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057990418173184725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20620478377362972,0.10575764090295373,0.09317510629580714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970838036879436,0.09523491103798552,0.0,0.07043467332499863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720769074300814,0.1062991728013104,0.10633821508593128,0.0,0.10654399110451193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824091422520685,0.08138266708816302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380367310480148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376720202560715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223231993737882,0.0,0.0,0.06759809798808733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251738551347681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11007920708672317,0.0,0.0,0.1745726197362265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436087273842608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542053086496082,0.0,0.1989005956688332,0.0,0.07933706752767486,0.16962416127049734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036717661437968,0.08377020599907341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082781398178728,0.0,0.07164039466293318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706412875627229,0.1244755414002523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795070065016577
mentalhealth,ArthurMorgan32,2020/02/28,"Mental health is taking a dive This is more of a venting post more than anything because its hard to find someone in my group of people to talk to about this. 3 months ago I had no issue at all and was happy as could be. Happy go lucky college grad taking a year off before starting adult life and grad school. Now it feels like I'm in a hole and I just shut down sporadically. My father is dying of cancer, my professional career is up in the air and I don't have that many friends in my current location (all of them are back in my college town). Dealing with my fathers mortality has taken a big hit in me emotionally and I'm having trouble coping with it. I've always been that macho guy who was good at sports, happy and outgoing but now I just feel like a shell of a man and scared shitless for what the future holds.

 I have every basic necessity, a girl who loves me and lots of opportunity so I should feel happy and grateful right? I don't, I just feel shitty and scared. I don't know if I'm really looking for any advice (any is welcome) but more so just a place to get things off my chest without being judged for it. I broke down the other day and had my own mother tell me I need to ""get my anxiety in check""...like what the fuck does that mean? How am I supposed to do that? My mental is something I've never really talked about or discussed because I know my male friends and family would just judge me for being weak.",3.0240362071523954,4.4528647201365255,4.480649948063512,85.62833209675027,74.15358361774744,6.733877429885743,23.31933521293961,7.255503002510835,0.8416720284908745,1125,31,231,12,23,375,164,293,0.094,0.758,0.14800000000000002,0.9479,1,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,1,13,19,1,2,13,0,27,7,1,1,3,43,49,20,2,5,10,3,5,2,2,2,4,0,0,5,16,14,0,1,8,1,0,1,6,6,0,0,6,6,29,13,37,36,7,33,0,1,1,2,21,20,1,4,13,158,45,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10778160483469504,0.0977722278850712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177649571024807,0.0,0.0,0.15001239329800695,0.0,0.08437741428040416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076558296401052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481209858248083,0.0,0.13447286958615567,0.0,0.0938551918370807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806371306038817,0.0,0.0,0.07113287129512455,0.11371205276711638,0.0,0.0,0.11447156584288964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652223273086444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407003107266205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293054256386717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397882534452392,0.0,0.22307926047842294,0.15759335241127426,0.0,0.0,0.10081007053051028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704314097031516,0.10196841694447632,0.11525195853962646,0.0,0.06268470665283132,0.09251245105465522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921203249967844,0.0,0.4696556751328709,0.09880504604360578,0.0,0.0,0.11724126355260935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151221093743251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123342782675475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790650494421666,0.10777173867109492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926222621163468,0.0,0.0,0.0937711332276984,0.0995479518653466,0.0,0.0,0.11182452365838348,0.0,0.12014649554691585,0.0,0.0,0.22230821452857585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803854646173673,0.0,0.0,0.08178432339885297,0.08506836135684122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646651536318398,0.0,0.11523758761437483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105634677050796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14131902117329773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419360599260568,0.0,0.0,0.22085441491810956,0.11162712873701018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345485634237667,0.0849125336423112,0.0,0.0,0.07806925725593708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658602395550637,0.17730617540683366,0.09640502357948433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327686973244943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632301617013347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783522988995925,0.0,0.0,0.07102808207424313
mentalhealth,Cheeky_bumbums,2020/02/28,"How can i trick my brain? (Advice) Hey guys, this is one of my first posts so be gentle please. (Mobile)

I’m a 19yo with some issues, one of them is that I can’t seem to love myself or believe that others can enjoy my company. I do have great friends and I know when I think rationally that they care about me. 

The problem is that I can’t always think rationally. The side that tells me that my loved ones don’t give a damn about me wins most of the times. 

How can I convince myself that it’s alright and that I won’t be replaced?",0.562738095238096,2.6585821785714288,2.1678571428571445,96.14380952380957,84.35714285714286,4.8047619047619055,17.36904761904762,5.985473137389443,-0.5275916666666665,412,9,95,3,12,134,70,112,0.053,0.6609999999999999,0.28600000000000003,0.9833,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,2,6,12,2,0,5,1,14,3,1,2,0,13,23,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,11,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,3,0,4,0,0,19,9,7,20,2,5,0,0,0,2,9,1,1,4,3,69,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953048223028231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663028882688887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251783263075544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22311436256784126,0.0,0.0,0.20377470438150472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17000424645361786,0.0,0.0,0.15441445800489148,0.0,0.0,0.1917277946123745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22035080466622015,0.0,0.19789681767490067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208606126703739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984004698752013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607701904140331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4062991288294848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21939069288124735,0.0,0.0,0.19141449843935407,0.0,0.0,0.19124288969856584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18194871150594116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746899763477058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25612960752129205,0.0,0.0,0.11654232633519228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iampambeesly,2020/02/28,"well, the thoughts are back I don’t think I’m actively considering anything, but at the same time after four years of this I’m really freaking tired. I can’t believe i have to deal with this again. it honestly hurts so much",2.930333333333333,4.957956200000002,4.0063888888888926,86.37625000000004,75.8888888888889,8.055555555555555,26.805555555555557,8.841846274778883,2.054888888888889,179,7,37,4,4,58,37,45,0.243,0.618,0.139,-0.8104,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,5,8,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,3,2,5,7,2,6,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652844381602442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24788393559446306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3632025083729992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33235106353400123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34510556827933386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369802893021963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065195634130341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20656276615464872,0.0,0.2559271175499249,0.1879775285244512,0.37051884204034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28985087020778033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20759680300997574
mentalhealth,Theartistformlyknown,2020/02/28,"Feeling stuck, lost and low. Normally I wouldn’t post a thread of my own,  but I feel I need serious outside advice from people of all ages.

I’m a 28 male, graduated college 3 years ago (have a lot of loans), single with no kids(by choice) and technically unemployed. I do seasonal bartending currently. I make music, and have for a while and after trying to force myself into a 9-5 life, I felt low and had anxiety attacks to start music FT again. I’m pretty broke right now, and constantly feel like everything is becoming too much with finding work, moving back out of my mother’s and getting my head clear. Everything seems grey... my daily routines are poor but I’m so low on creative thinking, and depressed, that breaking the cycle is difficult. 

I’m very optimistic, but lately it’s becoming too much to keep up with. My mental health may be worse than I thought, and I think trauma along with genes are stacked against me. I need advice from the ground up on how to attack these problems. Never really had emotional connections with parents or siblings, and most relationships have failed miserably. I’m 28 and keep telling myself I am 30 and everything’s over for me. 

Thanks for reading.",5.603772421524663,7.125034430493276,6.1433828475336325,75.84180072869958,67.9237668161435,9.700560538116592,32.32315022421525,9.978442167317967,3.430865695067265,950,41,164,23,16,308,146,223,0.243,0.664,0.09300000000000001,-0.9887,4,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,3,7,16,2,1,7,0,14,3,1,2,3,48,37,19,0,5,4,2,4,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,20,0,2,9,1,2,1,3,14,0,0,6,5,19,2,29,28,7,29,0,8,1,0,5,12,0,5,15,105,22,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422034984994316,0.10985536764908632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480516162471933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28197370918593606,0.0,0.09529356620390156,0.0,0.0,0.2737391560254888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339229622599848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673965875464088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940317381068876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33413753354667763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879863129708226,0.08853473037631368,0.11899104351271393,0.0,0.11326864080337165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474766174158708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718666044699525,0.13173047592159762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22030715082273394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979703840023827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753454767301122,0.06054533189021319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528288024877375,0.1053597993870932,0.0,0.0,0.0827234091275461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248910409771771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171665844915728,0.18220379496139494,0.18378320938894346,0.09558149910571934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142387150616946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13760822117654725,0.0,0.0,0.08591659758373689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868949429636128,0.1260801013589422,0.0,0.11858308566573478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396229614064813,0.0,0.07939193655815266,0.0,0.0,0.13305310840004556,0.0,0.1058344832714082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282008799013085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771741366089485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083191979729876,0.11409695117119137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881708981756812,0.0,0.0983855918744023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841394926390227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225420525777107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022161272448964,0.0,0.12629399321437873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980605779841153
mentalhealth,trompenguin,2020/02/28,"I thought I had control I've been self harming and smoking for about four years now. Upon receiving the information that I will be moving into a group home, I have taken some time to reflect on what exactly went wrong. I may have found my answer... and oh how I wish I hadn't. I started my SH at 13. At first I did it once maybe twice and then stopped. Things happened as they tend to do and three and a half years, dozens of stitches and ten separate hospitalizations later I can now say, I no longer have control over this obsession, or I guess it's more of an addiction. I don't know how to stop, what I'm doing is dangerous, deadly, and for once... I'm scared. This realization sucks, but I feel proud that I was able to even consider it. I've been a month clean (it's the hardest thing I have ever done in my life) and I thought I would document this moment, you know, make it real and something I can't take back.",2.3329787234042563,4.012053095744683,3.7425,89.15875,76.55319148936171,7.0404255319148925,24.51595744680851,7.865858978985527,1.1641212765957447,714,24,156,11,16,235,121,188,0.09699999999999999,0.847,0.055999999999999994,-0.2675,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,1,4,8,7,2,2,6,0,21,2,0,5,2,36,39,15,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,3,2,1,2,1,14,10,0,4,9,0,0,3,4,6,0,7,12,2,24,1,17,23,2,25,0,0,0,0,7,7,1,4,15,111,38,0,0.1517905844681193,0.0,0.0,0.16547414220201934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167175899823686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34049209499274224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533446847617455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002562494700959,0.13730327382637694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767498803038372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911299360632625,0.0,0.166430541153764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721444181344214,0.0,0.13422791254905445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152258332469292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16684027111390376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10721417879072216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013213938056748,0.0,0.15249404413945733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211577963558053,0.16132936930727426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3233040370995633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277091631276634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070996519700247,0.15196885513414565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15835068389664492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685580774055478,0.0,0.0,0.10743815694838553,0.0,0.0,0.25380745069559857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412762894870875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016858391566826,0.0,0.0,0.2410095377897398,0.0885103104709056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140711392526738,0.0,0.0,0.17455168104456756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078276761215254,0.1659591756307381,0.0,0.19549631949534144
mentalhealth,Ladybug1591,2020/02/28,"The way things are going After a very awful and harrowing experience, I got put on Zoloft. I felt better for a while, though I still had incredibly low executive function. I was better able to communicate my wants, needs, and emotions, but I still had exactly zero executive function. 

Well, then I tried to kill myself. 

Come to find out that I have a family history of suicidal tendencies on Zoloft and I didn't know it. So I got off the Zoloft and on Lexapro and Seroquel. 

Hello executive function! My house looks amazing! It's never been cleaner! Things I've been wanting to do that I've been putting off for no real reason I can suddenly do. I'm hanging out with friends all the time and not just randomly cancelling. I'm putting effort in where I previously felt like I couldn't. I'm not having panic attacks when I drive in icy and snowy conditions, which after a bad accident at the beginning of 2019 is a HUGE deal. 

I still feel like I have some work to do. Therapy is a must, and I need to call my therapist and make an appointment soon. But I feel so much more like I can actually live my life now. It's insane.",3.628156565656568,5.431455522727274,5.213939393939395,79.45035353535354,73.31818181818181,8.888888888888891,28.58585858585859,9.444778638647367,2.684237373737373,885,36,171,22,18,299,131,220,0.141,0.695,0.16399999999999998,0.5355,0,0,0,0,0,1,25.0,0,0,0,4,12,13,2,1,11,1,20,4,0,2,4,38,39,17,2,6,5,0,4,3,1,1,4,0,0,0,8,13,0,0,7,0,0,7,6,5,1,1,11,5,23,8,23,26,4,35,0,1,1,0,4,13,0,2,17,119,31,1,0.1256652555703141,0.0,0.1226311620055793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429623698365559,0.0,0.0,0.10492523935998044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22228141294653733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831827615515826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824949051165912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12955536055013858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413564984356165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229247332197608,0.11846601903035278,0.0,0.12708025806960935,0.08977528368853772,0.2413167045823405,0.0,0.11485576697320896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708866472748018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141846069756055,0.0,0.20101196923829648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500083278796294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902998643195705,0.0,0.06906233803109416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876108637243713,0.18418108882324272,0.0,0.11096472296279652,0.0,0.10552716507570488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388253389988624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237842207380573,0.1863583894134326,0.09692079211309558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744110131988244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789848724739595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14303457246467866,0.0,0.12920481224504307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010693062806431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745739329760895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14370917158027313,0.14590704736586158,0.16697282385035545,0.0,0.12346547556048144,0.0,0.07327642109626573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531845964822382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368699657573392,0.14824124721974866,0.09974723063553904,0.0,0.0,0.11298815654819973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148580272115904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,littlegirllee,2020/02/28,"my self esteem might be ruining my relationship possible TW!
mobile so sorry if formatting is bad. I have yet to get any solid education so I'm sorry for horrible grammar.
I should start off by saying I have a wonderful boyfriend and he has practically saved my life, by literally stopping a suicide attempt of mine and just helping me get thru life. I've had depression and anxiety from as long as I can remember, it's taken a huge tole on my self esteem. I think I'm worth a lot less than others and I don't compare to other women which I've made this clear to my SO. he always tries his best to reassure me I'm nothing what I think I am and that I'm really attractive. last night he was rather frustrated with me for saying that my body is ""disgusting and worthless"", he pointed out to me that at times it seems like I'm victimizing myself and it's just a pitty party because he thinks I'm really attractive and guys and women are always trying to get at me. he's also brought up before that he finds confident women more attractive (which ouch that just made me feel worse). he said if I do not seem to be making any kind of effort to work on my self image it'll most likely be the down fall of our relationship. he feels like all his compliments and reassurance means nothing to me, when in reality it's far from it. im in the process do getting into therapy because I really do want to get better but it's taking awhile to even be able to get into it. so I'm just wondering if any of you guys have any tips for fixing a broken self image?",4.4016190476190475,5.111464082539683,6.255555555555558,76.93000000000002,70.07936507936509,9.682539682539684,28.333333333333336,9.842372674337009,2.652333333333333,1226,42,240,29,21,427,168,315,0.087,0.794,0.11900000000000001,0.6224,0,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,1,1,0,5,13,20,3,0,8,0,22,3,1,3,2,48,54,22,1,6,10,0,2,3,0,3,2,3,0,9,19,14,0,1,12,0,1,2,2,7,0,0,7,5,30,13,40,40,6,25,0,3,0,0,30,15,0,10,11,152,49,1,0.09393671023796082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512115323889862,0.1563257360618889,0.0,0.0,0.2555207367554557,0.0,0.07186132621595745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843322930968936,0.11452589334407785,0.0,0.07993322164687479,0.0,0.09858078196027126,0.08307938651968956,0.0,0.10434250855892888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090755088114578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062044311173959074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499444635729666,0.06710840456344143,0.0,0.0,0.08585645135050207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944683240275905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18602422368825286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296379677163601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146776667740616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978206283424047,0.0,0.07657095640963958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270055295926853,0.13767819508726786,0.0,0.0,0.08313103254471335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798616318357672,0.0,0.17777037304358367,0.06270348351434818,0.0,0.0,0.10232461593938814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965200486725084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08815323911105899,0.0,0.1802696139208172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888005542029056,0.10589952654322962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805347858961228,0.0,0.0,0.20170574392628446,0.1064119808323436,0.0,0.08935532272649659,0.14940448464939826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103290596907558,0.39198590245381815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21030891279931227,0.06648888699602287,0.0,0.0,0.07853529596638288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275151445530646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062871553111423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10742481482258263,0.0,0.0,0.18057255276710887,0.0,0.0,0.05477525115876791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275537201679416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05540630551458894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20374071036257665,0.06838704383405478,0.0,0.09572953297015442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DwightSchrutehere,2020/02/28,"The obscurity of it all. Hey so I’m from England, London. I’m a young woman (23), and my main point of contention is that I’m struggling  with losing my closest family member (to a terminal illness). I watch them fade into death every single day and it’s chipping away at me, slowly. Thank you, so kindly, for your responses.",2.66,4.900763809523814,4.800238095238097,79.3489285714286,77.57142857142857,6.73968253968254,24.785714285714285,7.793537801064563,1.6782190476190486,252,9,44,4,6,87,52,63,0.14,0.769,0.09,-0.5118,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,1,1,2,4,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,5,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,7,2,9,5,3,8,0,1,1,0,5,5,0,1,3,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33078511774321456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270586071975123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966375344686396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319040386097725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666308981299163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39388075512168425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33282373558146844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36806419402009205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3241424416382129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,prexxor,2020/02/28,"Debating going offline Has anybody taken a break from the internet before as a way of healing? I'm debating getting a flip phone for the summer and just getting offline to clear my anxiety/anger/depression and just generally not using the internet much. Would really appreciate some insight on what works best, I'm in a really rough patch right now and could really use some ideas.",8.424130434782608,8.985928478260874,9.094021739130431,60.58711956521742,61.31884057971014,13.2768115942029,38.98913043478261,12.602617957971056,5.733547826086959,311,15,46,11,4,105,52,69,0.044000000000000004,0.8140000000000001,0.142,0.8313,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,7,0,3,1,0,2,1,16,11,4,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,7,8,4,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,2,30,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160960332261594,0.0,0.2665089120023032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027614955659605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21873009048350847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653608242066295,0.0,0.14432783297844706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866830004858683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866853099556671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48806804339546395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21687521182209124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4386692006268624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015767562422478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18488143718126385,0.0,0.0,0.18040153831599648,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,perilous_33,2020/02/28,"I found a picture that impacted me like crazy. I need someone to help me find out what it means. I found a picture that describes some way I've felt almost my whole life, but never had the words or courage to describe it. I can't even say how impactful it was. If someone knows what they mean when they see it, please please say something. Just knowing someone made it makes me realize I'm not alone. It's such a hard feeling to describe, and I can only do it with this picture [here](https://imgur.com/a/NNKXHQA)",4.8825571428571415,6.059079970000003,4.613428571428571,87.43100000000004,69.3,7.314285714285713,32.285714285714285,7.447530270364453,2.0061714285714287,407,18,80,4,7,124,70,100,0.034,0.7859999999999999,0.18,0.924,0,1,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,5,1,0,3,1,26,18,6,0,2,5,0,3,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,12,3,0,0,10,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,6,11,2,5,12,2,4,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,4,3,50,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16405562502851695,0.1696821382684364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821050829897633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283916068535004,0.0,0.15730589133684075,0.0,0.14974088785247971,0.0,0.0,0.3592700415168497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676267203281934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981416868323356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800772583993339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572047473471353,0.08004079229927252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15502325727824925,0.10936016042115296,0.0,0.0,0.35692550993929184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148049429696785,0.12635852639219955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12460279011434977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.359680058192929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605740142835783,0.0,0.0,0.13055412011775516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4164468814233631,0.12612706360080425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300434385647843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18291429705010076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AtomicPickles92,2020/02/28,"When something/someone motions “suicidal thoughts” does it count even if you know you won’t?  I mean I guess I think about suicide most days, but I never plan to or even want to. Sure, my life isn’t perfect, but I really like what I have going and I wouldn’t even say that I’m unhappy. I guess I’m just not sure if this is a thing I should talk to someone about or just not worry",3.823703703703707,3.787092851851853,4.7131851851851865,90.12533333333332,71.09876543209877,7.961481481481481,27.31111111111111,7.554174236665415,1.2058622222222215,295,9,69,3,5,96,53,81,0.139,0.6679999999999999,0.19399999999999998,0.6814,0,0,1,0,0,1,7.0,0,2,0,2,8,4,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,0,4,25,16,8,2,5,10,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,1,1,12,4,5,12,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,7,4,46,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003337918962115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16287673407057887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687957432396335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577749816722473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4100690292787049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228785755330404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146356781394536,0.09092987347692616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20274156793774095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354886411685314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923460522788705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14801179167235626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154013609802065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40717481238309466,0.0,0.35083581801878944,0.0,0.0,0.1495979214516022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365127584870078,0.1192595484427382,0.0,0.14776018467144608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977965712883024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18901606206916385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nerman_,2020/02/28,It is weird that I will feel so depressed then 20 minutes I feel normal? I have noticed that I'll feel super depressed to the point where I wanna cut yet like a hour later I feel normal as if nothing happened. Is this kinda normal lol,1.62125,3.901610291666668,3.1498333333333366,89.57850000000002,81.5,3.84,22.1,3.1291,-0.033005000000000166,186,6,35,0,5,61,35,48,0.222,0.616,0.162,-0.5205,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,1,0,2,1,4,0,0,0,0,10,9,4,0,5,1,0,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,5,2,3,8,0,6,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,2,5,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3777153031331159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4434796964070543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939004779908144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215937606795125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712465570446973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6445165972327302,0.2103962829372291,0.2496413025096907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072818166156816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LebenTheNinja,2020/02/28,"I feel like I'm not even real Don't get me wrong, I know I'm real, I know everything happening is actually happening but I feel like I'm just watching someone else, not myself. 

I've been in a bad spot lately, I went out with some friends thinking ""hey, maybe it'll help"" but honestly I felt more disconnected than ever. I've been disassociating for a long time, I can no longer afford my medication and without a car and a with a very young child to take care of it's near impossible for me to see a mental health professional. Even when I feel like I'm in control I feel like I'm on the brink of an anxiety attack. 

I've struggled a lot with that and now the only medication that could help is so far out of reach for me. I don't know what to do. I'm scared of myself. Im scared to be alone and I'm scared that I'll never feel better.",1.0959349326322716,2.9377350837988843,3.6784817614196506,87.4437364442984,80.84357541899442,6.8933289516924106,21.143936904370687,7.928766900206844,0.8374729543213935,656,19,149,12,17,230,98,179,0.17600000000000002,0.648,0.17600000000000002,-0.2575,1,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,7,15,1,4,10,0,11,3,0,1,2,33,35,8,0,1,6,0,6,4,1,1,3,0,0,1,6,9,0,1,10,0,0,2,7,7,0,0,4,8,16,8,22,28,3,18,0,0,2,0,5,8,0,2,12,84,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.11331749351517885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026649299585672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883236331757795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210457400812586,0.0,0.0,0.09695631139997044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269972231433333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183932533666932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302397457669207,0.09271329087755813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700432201888587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15339385124707333,0.10503822989778604,0.0,0.0,0.10436220373581634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.293571717094531,0.3318278962972355,0.11149451599165948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971491385813551,0.0,0.06066850911092821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053711021465676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343135433264928,0.0,0.0,0.1556671206947496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543077047343745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19145144465708186,0.0,0.13098971715326296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22692371712606865,0.0,0.0,0.10276356525601567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872205075995616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665930476368826,0.0,0.0,0.23395968782160176,0.11702280906509617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955979093847308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831536859138701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643425858914258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487725914620664,0.0,0.09253352375771501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838907512393487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139504050493485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730865472561483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07440574533041093,0.0,0.0,0.06771117745760108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958121114561773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764547112074582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193664657770283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696025052972693,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rSlashZo5o,2020/02/28,"Do I have a mental disorder??? I don’t really know if I have a mental disorder or not so I want more advice before seeking a professional.

I never feel like doing anything anymore. I used to be active and get my homework done and stuff but now I never have the motivation to get my homework done like I have before. I also hate chess which is something I used to love.

There are sometimes when I get these weird 30 minute to 2 hour periods where I just don’t do anything. Like anything. I’m really sad and think about sad stuff or nothing at all.

My friends tell me that I’m acting weird and not like I used to. One sent me this one night “Hey, you’ve seemed pretty down lately and I don’t know what ur going through but I really hope you are ok. Make sure you talk to someone if you ever need to.” Another asks me if I’m okay a lot. The other times I am completely fine though.

I never have actually thought about doing it but i have thought things like “what if I never existed”, “what if I killed myself”, “how quickly would people forget about me”. Those are mostly during the 30 minute to 2 hour periods when I’m sad though.

My dad always asks me if I’m okay and I always say yes because I don’t want him to worry.

I am afraid of a lot and constantly worry about things. If I see any bug I freak out. If I’m in a plane or car I always think “what if we crash”.

A few bad events have happened to me recently. I went through my first break up and lost my best friend because of that break up, my grandmother was in the hospital with Pneumonia for about a month, and my mother lost her well paying job.

My self confidence has also really took a toll. I think I’m ugly, I think I suck at sports, I think I’m dumb. It also doesn’t help that my friends tell me these things to my face (not the people who asked me if I’m okay and sent the messages, they are my good friends.)

I think that’s about it. I don’t know if I have a mental disorder or not so I want some advice from people before I consult a professional and probably look stupid. 

Feel free to ask any questions. Thank you.",1.6106944444444484,3.481852754629632,3.344685185185188,90.31883333333336,79.32407407407408,6.44962962962963,20.985185185185188,7.461004344511776,0.6175424074074076,1618,44,352,23,40,539,191,432,0.20199999999999999,0.638,0.161,-0.9542,1,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,1,4,1,5,23,37,5,1,17,5,31,2,1,6,7,76,84,39,1,17,23,2,2,5,4,1,0,1,2,1,23,14,0,0,16,2,2,7,14,15,1,3,11,5,65,23,33,71,8,39,0,5,2,1,33,9,2,22,26,234,88,8,0.0,0.0,0.06708127795498033,0.0,0.0,0.13434577510982307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649164044177637,0.17159399981054546,0.0,0.0,0.09349244374589663,0.07208090845924002,0.0,0.0,0.06817257834723328,0.0,0.0,0.16970390191299628,0.0,0.2570541381447466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0573958448316706,0.0838077236069267,0.0,0.1754805263120587,0.0,0.0721394148191409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207360697118065,0.07428457590947415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23634934668082125,0.0,0.0,0.14069177251287213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218014957001045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951500723584639,0.04910856800267471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05847104027559525,0.0,0.0,0.2124364345358052,0.0,0.10774297056542184,0.0,0.03906708160322195,0.057656670464821376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060787419310369725,0.0,0.0,0.06786748371198258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04607562816581898,0.0,0.0,0.06827530104235352,0.1353920318830244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821481318076536,0.0,0.07605170669013916,0.0,0.11333473037156395,0.0,0.07754281667397872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16791684662827586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05772510817374776,0.0,0.15007779424089152,0.11688224160071504,0.06204141594689025,0.0,0.04588513620910093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20782421156138964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486839234804596,0.0,0.0,0.050970563741849634,0.21206911812707546,0.0,0.0,0.06450875066548419,0.0,0.06595882178719747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316133065813192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14296901533665882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993428686180557,0.07411440011918859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700562682014295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17614892138975355,0.0,0.06787342222718737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05466558430377688,0.0,0.0,0.05477765907797452,0.0625792041109932,0.07171183129731963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058244007093556475,0.0529201627968481,0.06798658436886308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573839460182165,0.0,0.0,0.06478755770062272,0.0,0.0,0.055251393786821576,0.12016528828950455,0.06328745636511651,0.0,0.0,0.1370053527722921,0.2642786561434947,0.13507532259279534,0.10914531525675963,0.0400834167328623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637375522022183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17811040085666266,0.0,0.0,0.12163562849573853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061806394158491124,0.06372357475307472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13961959866930798,0.0,0.04883161808291177,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IHaveProblemsssssss,2020/02/28,something something traumatic just happened and i’m clinging to my dog for dear life please help me calm down and feel safe or even happy,5.5403846153846175,7.477988423076923,4.456923076923079,86.26307692307695,68.61538461538461,6.7384615384615385,32.230769230769226,7.1686216300943375,2.0216769230769227,113,5,20,1,2,33,24,26,0.09699999999999999,0.47100000000000003,0.4320000000000001,0.8957,0,0,2,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,3,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,10,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24734041596452802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893482692591759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3311513037781869,0.3986407747786145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510059567030681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26450620005790576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110664324844793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5765857838725729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clayface44,2020/02/28,"What do you guys do when suicidal thoughts are overwhelming I don’t know what’s wrong with me but Starting this year specifically my mental health has been miserable and it’s causing my physical health to decline from lack of eating good and stress. Wtf do I do, I can’t see any professional because I lack medical issuance for another month but I don’t honestly know if I can last that long it feels like the thoughts get worse everyday.",4.587500000000002,6.7229560833333375,4.963809523809527,80.84785714285717,71.5,9.561904761904762,32.23809523809524,9.957137785484203,3.451638095238094,357,17,67,10,7,113,62,84,0.27699999999999997,0.613,0.11,-0.9513,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,7,0,3,1,0,11,4,0,1,0,14,19,6,1,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,6,3,1,0,5,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,2,10,3,5,16,2,7,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,1,8,41,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13426057703383226,0.2070247385802268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035275665635553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20281711984766213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20202229537605396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998275861668809,0.14104550941602012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315010725193953,0.0,0.0,0.16559665222776218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954887883605184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4197221136384088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21700700346103727,0.1609334869980352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645533614796888,0.0,0.0,0.1747211680835637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988920384321876,0.19896508885552255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15758839372279598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732779723589554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397434344902764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261577677835384,0.0,0.0,0.21595863877102808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31347801853890983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20120014522426474,0.0,0.21586097385266834,0.0,0.12713977925743786
mentalhealth,GamesCooky,2020/02/28,"Just another life story for those interested. So i've been very interested in mental health lately. Especially everything that has to do with trauma and personality disorders. Perhaps because i can somewhat relate to many of the symptoms that some of the personality disorders present.

This post will serve as rare insight into my thoughts because there are many things that i've gotten curious about when it comes to myself. Call it an introduction.

Over the years i have grown accustomed to a lifestyle of isolation and lack of social relationships. The reason i prefer to stay to myself is because i don't like other people. Ever since an early age i've had the attitude that i don't really need or desire any friends. Friendship is to me more of an annoyance than a benefit. The few friendships that i have had was when i was at school. These friendships consisted of insults, bullying and beatings for the sake of jokes. At the time i seemed to have this weird impulse to hit other kids for no reason whatsoever. Which is probably why my perception of friendship turned out the way it did. This was early life and was my most outgoing period.

When i got into teenage years i decided i was tired of having to deal with other people, so i suspect this is where i developed the preference to stick to myself. I was getting sick of school as well, because now i've wasted so many years listening to some teacher talking about things which for the most part was useless information.

As i was tipping the twenties i was now driving delivery trucks as a living, because obviously society is built up in such a way that you need money to live. Driving trucks was never my ambition. I was constantly pushed into taking the truck license in order to get that profession. It was not an interest or a passion of mine. It just sort of happened.

In late 2019 was my first experience trauma. I had an experience where i was driving a truck on some slippery snow a little too fast. I lost grip and started slippering at a speed of around 70-80 km/h. However i managed to regain control just in time. I was told afterwards that this was a traumatic event and could have killed me because i could have run off the road and crashed down into a cliff and perhaps into a house. This was the first time anyone has said to me that i've experienced a traumatic event. And it was just one big anticlimax.

The year is now 2020 and i suspect that i'm experience a constant state of dissociation, because i realize that i feel very little of any emotions. I also tend to get these very violent fantasies and urges that involve cutting someone's throat, strangulations, dismemberments and just stabbings in general. Here's a recent experience i had. I'll wake up one morning and i'm driving on my way to work. Then i see this person walking on the sidewalk, and i'm wondering whether i should run him over and kill him to see how that would make me feel. The desire is driven by curiosity. I have thought about how i want to do it, and when i supposedly would want to do it. I don't think it's going to come to that though.

And that's basically where i am at today. I have some personality disorders which i may suspect and wouldn't really surprise me if i qualify for. But it's the sort of thing that i don't think i can self diagnose. Maybe i'll go talk to a therapist at some point. Just to see if my theories are correct.

If any therapists are reading this. Then i'd be interested in hearing your opinions.",5.559012749264465,6.821405639097744,6.514810395554104,74.10328457012098,67.796992481203,9.8126838836221,33.403890160183074,10.023610245241436,3.5052582543314803,2790,126,497,67,46,928,301,665,0.114,0.8170000000000001,0.069,-0.9853,1,2,0,0,0,0,55.0,0,2,0,7,34,22,6,0,39,0,63,10,2,6,4,97,103,42,2,18,14,0,3,1,1,6,7,3,0,6,46,29,0,1,20,3,1,14,8,11,1,4,32,10,60,11,86,61,12,94,0,2,3,1,24,36,0,19,38,369,106,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05446805635356787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895271793326164,0.07141994753951886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047624545021982496,0.0,0.0,0.06063291229121656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906373092369192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954858141551308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734257550241092,0.0,0.14720681600316188,0.0763918773452427,0.10876161195319392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021908188777719,0.0,0.06913086861521485,0.0,0.0,0.2341820920651835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661530558728691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061609975723333224,0.0,0.0,0.061213453852507524,0.2665011118440306,0.0,0.0,0.0688775748824097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586975575996053,0.0,0.0,0.05262211358854177,0.0,0.10675499893131456,0.0,0.07741769570515293,0.0,0.05447430298688707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060230016394206734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239842818498364,0.07676564444528174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859053695731441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15070866941617572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366354329603796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962171224095684,0.033275419618148734,0.13652951457167176,0.1202858906847569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435081230692488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04546438288511295,0.2071605039065948,0.06842629527730892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863950804000364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10100635705947326,0.05253112653245909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923070684115751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375718870239932,0.0,0.09443868742668818,0.23788634419684915,0.0,0.0,0.06438657264978423,0.0,0.06523116817889141,0.0,0.07343479267368777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812907439980609,0.0,0.08726684356311226,0.140058168999011,0.0672510427297748,0.07312534055538326,0.0,0.0,0.06478881838089066,0.0,0.0,0.13786321331714252,0.16282609173407625,0.0620053710504955,0.07105425470759104,0.0,0.0,0.056341827471272525,0.0,0.0,0.06943022284960812,0.057709926526042926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0482090634613702,0.07259688270092816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079303685691005,0.05121072683075927,0.10948950922202902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15816341158685093,0.13574905362303394,0.08728509930039775,0.06691836062884954,0.10814448453060198,0.11914759045598805,0.07828316429483395,0.06456092530416335,0.06508263791023994,0.0,0.0,0.07408482078613672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16859524003481333,0.08034684349198562,0.16218917363975696,0.0,0.0,0.06123964753999165,0.0,0.06145926109728786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386308659461865,0.049585359074045855,0.0,0.0,0.09676769275802076,0.0,0.0,0.1754440831955624
mentalhealth,kenny66ean,2020/02/28,"I think I had an anxiety disorder as a teenager and it would explain why I was so miserable 
Before I (F,19) start ranting, I would like to say that I have never been officially diagnosed nor have I seen a medical professional about my mental health. 

This is something I have never shared before so I think it will be therapeutic for me. I’m not asking for a diagnosis or anything; I would just like to know if anyone else can relate to my past experience. 

I was a happy child and found life pretty smooth. I made friends easily and did well at school. But once I got to secondary school and especially at the age of 14/15 years old, I found life quite difficult and I think it could all be explained if I or my family had realised that I was really struggling mentally. 
I was very shy and closed off, I found it incredibly difficult to make friends and talk to new people. I hated being the centre of attention and I would always blush/ tear up. I hated school presentations and sports competitions and I would often think of ways of catching a cold so I wouldn’t be able to speak or breaking my arm/fingers so I wouldn’t have to play. I would cry all the time, especially if I was struggling to do something and afraid people would think I was useless. I was paranoid about my health/ safety. For about 6 months, I was nauseous, had stomach cramps and developed a phobia of vomiting in public so I missed a lot of school. My mum thought I had a problem with my gut and I even went to the doctor but my mental health was never brought up. When I was made to go to school, I would be crying on the walk there and cry if anyone asked how I was feeling. I would constantly check information like travel times or deadlines to make sure they were correct. I always thought everyone was judging me and comparing me to my twin sister who I resented (unfortunately) because she was always better at everything. I would always worry about my friends and family, always assume the worst. I would try and mentally prepare for situations like the death of a parent because I thought something bad was going to inevitably happen. To be honest, I didn’t like myself and was comparing myself to my sister constantly. I also felt like I wasn’t in charge of my life and I was being dragged along. It almost felt like I was dissociating sometimes.  I had low self-esteem. I couldn’t wait to leave my town and start a whole new life, become someone else away from everyone I knew.

These habits and thoughts disappeared with time. I think changing schools and finding an amazing group of friends (through my sister) pushed me out of my comfort zone as well as tough love from my family who were tired of my ‘sensitivity’. 
I am grateful to no longer feel that way but I do resent my parents, especially my mother for not recognising that I was deeply troubled. I thought it was just my personality and I forgot how I was as a teenager. I thought it was just a phase of awkward teenage years, my hormones were making me sensitive and I was just boring. I’m only seeing this from a new perspective as mental health has become a bigger part of my life and I feel more educated about it. Two people very close to me are struggling and I have had to learn how to be as supportive as I can.  But it also has made me recognise that maybe I was struggling to. My mental health was not taken seriously and, although this may be unreasonable of me, it makes me angry that it didn’t cross my parents’ minds. I can’t blame them though, because as 50 year olds, open conversations about mental health aren’t affluent in their daily lives. They used more of a tough love kind of approach. 
I’m just grateful that I ‘grew out of it’. 

I am much happier now and although I still don’t like being the centre of attention, blush during any public speeking, cry quite regularly, worry and do more checks than I need to, I feel like I am in control of my thoughts the majority of the time. The anxious thoughts i have feel like a healthy amount to have and I feel mentally stable. I have some flaws and I would like to change some things about myself but overall, I can say I love myself. I don’t feel 
like a victim to my own thoughts like I did as a teenager.

I apologise for the long post but I would like to know if anyone else has had a similar experience with their mental health or feels like an undiagnosed mental illness would explain a lot about how they felt and acted growing up. 

Thank you for reading and letting me share my story.",5.056528291909043,6.303163730414751,5.688310040039287,79.62453765959056,68.95391705069125,8.502863186522626,29.78250358842638,8.841846274778883,2.3609364433028635,3570,135,669,61,61,1157,341,868,0.135,0.7090000000000001,0.156,0.9799,4,0,3,0,0,0,75.0,0,1,6,4,34,61,5,7,35,0,97,24,2,13,7,157,167,74,1,25,24,8,12,15,4,18,19,3,0,2,26,42,0,3,41,4,2,14,18,25,2,1,65,18,129,36,96,71,16,66,0,4,2,3,43,21,0,18,42,482,155,10,0.03669271373776535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03674245255685393,0.0,0.0,0.05868629983875723,0.15265638610916474,0.0,0.0,0.02495230358844841,0.0,0.028069825577016486,0.04145232235794602,0.0,0.07696919578060306,0.07519204273727736,0.030194976984352674,0.0,0.06860546838509811,0.0,0.03447401240690587,0.0,0.030636883315357338,0.06710261317525756,0.08104843904650558,0.062445593689545276,0.0,0.0,0.0324517234992996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763205170867954,0.0,0.0,0.07930357645031365,0.04115399850168156,0.029296146206314926,0.0,0.16122089233533726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03724233206827544,0.0,0.0,0.04205302885111598,0.03755654731401113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195616206514004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02423519136656894,0.0,0.0,0.07012292081627435,0.03297704514766358,0.07178502963056654,0.103771874832209,0.0,0.14842350846803332,0.10485312810324177,0.10569227812248712,0.0,0.03353647561176012,0.0,0.0,0.1206950001248408,0.11339479845434265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041706629602183916,0.0,0.029346515119281963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032447245578757875,0.039060076072090735,0.0,0.07245291660010937,0.0,0.2730184721221706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03820981493096525,0.04033071174582245,0.0,0.0,0.03885228583867463,0.0,0.03752078580427996,0.1295857442272323,0.2688930976756652,0.0,0.032400338472125485,0.03247189700555813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062389666151975415,0.09934982018257202,0.1041585987941274,0.09797068537420013,0.0,0.036862762785517,0.0,0.0,0.03696404882152947,0.3697762522929257,0.0,0.0370491809582476,0.0,0.029287774036575693,0.0,0.02697336651501106,0.02720718230486543,0.08489904860584352,0.1063141547241159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700566137793516,0.03907654261009095,0.0,0.027906462234576337,0.0,0.0,0.12222874894763275,0.039734633299149,0.03502734712979806,0.07631432298673699,0.032038662331870624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03514147695787991,0.03732968114001193,0.0,0.035109971587809465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780544353110459,0.036702643307209896,0.0,0.023506291991045397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058359037403924015,0.0,0.22280991139867615,0.029239342227336682,0.0,0.03827850281200615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04124414760568825,0.0,0.0,0.03108961727765192,0.08474353103739611,0.0362900321169108,0.0,0.05194258327990296,0.0,0.029302848588889995,0.0,0.0,0.15343676496397327,0.0,0.0,0.041638456721285834,0.03458244845741363,0.0,0.0,0.029492213407122388,0.0,0.03378172098817084,0.0,0.0,0.02437700858412418,0.14106725625789565,0.03605040494827115,0.26216924482699666,0.08558326582191371,0.042172876725317415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024911944054955587,0.0,0.03584344966196283,0.0,0.0,0.03169072363049123,0.0,0.06055066321101426,0.0,0.058249936519594266,0.0,0.0,0.06598231253604013,0.03401451324347683,0.03310946696180065,0.040966104515863966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745264638148215,0.0,0.36491631503489147,0.0,0.0,0.0708867138877368
mentalhealth,imexcis,2020/02/28,"I can’t help but feel like I have nothing to be depressed about I read stuff on here about people who were sexually abused or were in terrible accidents or incidents or people who were homeless or have a horrible diseases,

Then in real life I went to a mental health youth service and met a 14 year old who was raped and beaten by her boyfriend and a girl who was in and out of psychiatric facilities since she was 9 

I’ve had some problems in life but nothing like that why am I so depressed why do I hate myself and want to die so much I always feel like such a disgusting person for feeling this way",12.389754098360655,6.411156745901643,11.490245901639344,67.00700819672133,59.40983606557378,14.822950819672133,45.254098360655746,11.20814326018867,4.807140983606558,481,18,97,8,4,157,80,122,0.28800000000000003,0.5710000000000001,0.141,-0.9835,0,0,0,0,1,1,1.0,0,0,0,1,6,11,4,0,5,0,13,4,0,0,0,19,20,14,1,2,6,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,2,7,6,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,8,0,0,9,3,10,3,14,10,2,12,0,2,0,1,10,6,0,5,7,67,17,3,0.0,0.1949947605464933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13693979243867846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28349684456306257,0.0,0.17080312715519616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496425750750089,0.2351451839809744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16248398795614172,0.0,0.17493579561841954,0.0,0.0,0.11031132145311558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324887332888789,0.24120946343880625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585314420300432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209817455424572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158287833494575,0.0,0.1726940410825125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281915137706476,0.14370076095610754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747628855580115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16461978710952965,0.1873226654149864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13613834806053274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18839928777850748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707074686612076,0.13063217366575253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525629062164978,0.297007131444995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059810656453095
mentalhealth,throwaway74884848,2020/02/29,"I feel lost I woke up today feeling like I died in my sleep I couldn’t breathe and I was fishing around my room trying to come back to reality. Everything around me went dark and instantly bit my finger hard to snap me back into place.
My whole body was numb, I got news yesterday that my apartment is adding more bills on to a lease I can’t afford. 

I have been overwhelmed by stress and I tried talk to my sibling about it they said I need to own up to my responsibility and not to rely on people.I was venting, I never ask her for help because her help puts me in a darker place. I should have know better to have vent to her but I needed someone to talk to.My stomachs in knots and I have been throwing up these past two days. I feel nauseous, numb and exhausted. I locked up all my doors, windows and bedroom thinking someone was going to take me away. 

I don’t know what to do or how to stop these feelings. I feel hopeless and a failure.",2.2175833838690124,4.004485324742273,3.458526379624015,90.59226500909641,77.1958762886598,5.8018192844147976,24.29836264402668,6.522977012572876,0.6396965433596118,739,25,158,6,17,240,113,194,0.14,0.8079999999999999,0.052000000000000005,-0.9559,1,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,1,2,6,9,0,2,3,0,16,8,5,1,2,32,35,11,1,4,3,0,7,1,0,1,3,1,4,0,5,12,0,1,8,0,1,5,5,7,0,1,11,8,34,2,30,22,5,30,0,3,0,0,10,17,0,1,9,108,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463084317443089,0.1293316262317923,0.0,0.12997739662072114,0.21275379087213347,0.0,0.08433234542028646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235275913080222,0.15103425387507552,0.15366740597908304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119169872667587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921951158265183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435777441378778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433337976285774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34975079561894856,0.09883195824101587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862326951577364,0.0,0.11064518948571242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12392776770303293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18545621442534327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520589148344288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758719078522081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510172552018999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051585225201904,0.1066983170116192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206363497013265,0.0,0.0,0.2890770777482241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390724913413459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13159546232348596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844247737565726,0.0,0.23443441790224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566058144114726,0.15847094426478284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401639421167767,0.22238903171437052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864433156397163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13113257851819807,0.0,0.0,0.18785104529204968,0.0,0.13514058700154474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824494655639554,0.0,0.15445453670480558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GinFusion,2020/02/29,"feeling sad, but not sad enough if it normal to feel sad but almost wish you were sadder? like I don't know if this is normal or what but I've found after dealing with mental health issues for almost 10 years when I feel sad I almost need to feel the full sadness or else it just feels like fake sadness or not important enough or idk just I almost wish I felt the entire sadness I feel when my mental health is the worst. 
I probably sound crazy but am I the only person who feels this way? Is it normal? Why does this happen? Honestly is so confusing",2.505357142857143,4.446894535714286,3.6333571428571454,88.96164285714286,76.85714285714286,5.908571428571428,19.23571428571429,6.742157984588678,0.19085428571428545,436,9,87,4,10,141,64,112,0.337,0.544,0.11900000000000001,-0.988,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,5,13,0,1,4,0,7,2,0,0,0,36,21,13,0,8,14,0,8,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,8,1,0,0,10,0,0,0,3,10,0,0,3,9,10,3,5,18,4,6,0,7,0,0,4,1,0,11,6,55,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4837628141411803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451576747055802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056927528260308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089367258355114,0.0,0.0,0.2495898209232339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4274793052827461,0.0862831016863963,0.1159648452481726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242572929958882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680268830735556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567605729599972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605979271986997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663758719572611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801106765481267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434295861646772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955460346779859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3550074035734232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185633894766307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105457804068754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021801657018212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586714839823443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898244263478868,0.0,0.2777751427418621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777641803326707
mentalhealth,Nandamarks,2020/02/29,"Mental helth, ups and downs, suicidal fantasies. I don't  know if I am properly diagnosed but Inam being treated for anxiety and depression.
I am successful at worl, but this is the only kind of good thing  about my life, I also have a husband who is a good guy.

. I crashed my car twice in 3 years and I feel like a total disaster.
. I was robbed, my laptop was taken and I feel gutted, I feel like an Idiot like this is all my fault.
. I have no joy at all on anything, every single  thing is a burden for me.
. I hate myself intensely.
. I hate the fact that sometimes I pushed me into  doing things  that are not natural for me, but I wanted to be strong and resilient.
. I live in a nee country, I don't Identity wirh the culture, the people, the expectations.
. I go to church but started  hating it, because I have to fake happiness, and church is a place full  of expectations.
. I cry daily despite taking ssri medication.

I want to be happy and normal, but have been unable to",3.3439062500000034,4.825233494791668,5.319708333333335,79.72112500000003,73.42708333333334,8.036666666666667,26.34166666666667,8.648137234880735,2.0140141666666667,749,26,142,14,15,259,116,192,0.235,0.584,0.18100000000000002,-0.9306,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,3,20,4,0,12,0,21,4,1,0,4,28,34,14,1,6,7,1,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,9,8,0,0,4,1,0,3,4,8,0,1,4,3,28,12,19,27,5,15,2,1,0,0,4,10,0,1,5,111,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702076901995853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194273908232584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041786369074735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920195932829522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607376240707002,0.0,0.0,0.12603459099627518,0.14852278472830516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232900956698543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219679015710295,0.20907765046530166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316322348976846,0.2454708350237467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14489059854493844,0.0,0.3115439312066149,0.0,0.4334144105990001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238111585215028,0.08041963655206585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335784321150687,0.21446966096427525,0.0,0.12921286688485706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474129884171028,0.14746713126411584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337321442672268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112912444740598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144742228517792,0.0,0.15288464706826801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447250032033993,0.0,0.10357376520581472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600622557175965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100226267834124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29164724633429034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172619513953751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423230288536566
mentalhealth,Jellibird,2020/02/29,"Bad Circumstances today Had me considering suicide My mother is abusive, I always thought she got better over the years but it just turns out I had more leverage to resist her manipulation and abuse. My last job ended almost a year ago now and since then I've moved home. Getting used to no longer having income was punishing and I regret coming back so much. She made so many empty promises to try to get me to leave my job early. I had some holdover debt from moving back home, airfare and shipping, and from the vacation she insisted we take together and she has lorded over my finances ever since. She's never forgiven me for leaving.  I didn't think I needed to protect myself when I was coming home. The lack of mobility I've had and the shame I feel are crippling. Most days I dont leave the house or change my clothes. I've gained weight, I shaved my head, and stopped trying to date. I dont have money to go out and meet people. Everytime I interact with my grandmother she presses me to go out and find someone but my self esteem has taken a nose dive, I dont have the energy to even try. Today I had a financial issue about a bill I wanted to cancel that keeps being charged. I went along with what my mother wanted because she wouldn't pay for it otherwise and she made every wrong choice, getting slapped with every fee, and worsening my debt. I would file bankruptcy if it didn't cost $1k and she railed at me about how it's all my fault. I dont want to do this anymore. I want out. I've started fantasizing about going hiking on the AT this year but after doing the math it's like $500 for food a month and I don't  have that. I don't even know how much money I spend in a month, I just take things from the fridge and pantry. Sometimes when it's bad like this I think about how I could die. My parents asked me what I would do if I dont have retirement saved and I run out of money. I told them seriously, I would kill myself. Maybe I'm just throwing a fit and trying to run away from my responsibilities. I've never felt more depressed and worthless in my life though. Its different from hormonal directionless teenage angst I've felt in the past because all my mistakes are sitting right below the surface. I have so many flaws . I distract myself from how miserable I feel until it overwhelms me. I don't actually think I'm brave enough to try suicide, but I think about dying a lot.  Especially since it's a symptom of depression, I think, am I depressed? Does this really count as suicidal thoughts? I don't want to live with the consequences of failing an attempt, if my organs were messed up and I needed someone to keep caring for me or I needed medicine.  What im doing isn't working though,  I can't make myself smaller,  I can't vanish and at least every other week if not more often I wish I could. Just stay in bed, stop taking up electricity, food, and water, completely vanish from detection like a ghost, no longer be a burden. When I  think about it I start crying. Idk who I am anymore. I dont think I'm a functioning person anymore, which is probably  why no one wants to date me or hire me, they can tell I've become this empty shell of a person and they know they can do better. Maybe this isn't the right reddit for this, I just recently started using this site and for the most part people on here are assholes who are only interested in stories they can laugh at.",3.610373751387346,5.144480557352947,4.719067702552722,84.08118201997783,72.83823529411767,7.367369589345173,25.47724750277469,7.966352962830772,1.443178135405106,2689,86,530,38,53,882,309,680,0.23,0.695,0.075,-0.9988,7,0,0,0,1,3,63.0,1,0,5,6,31,31,2,4,28,0,56,8,2,10,5,114,112,49,7,23,17,3,6,3,0,4,2,0,4,3,28,36,4,5,16,0,11,11,23,20,0,1,20,7,95,11,71,84,15,74,1,8,0,0,29,27,0,13,37,360,123,8,0.0,0.13140229292767264,0.05411281859743937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04915454849882417,0.0,0.05552682488285763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04614022107325158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16497943142493487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05183981421941245,0.0,0.052098657458037385,0.08527780338523222,0.09259963537687436,0.06760563130072664,0.06124199895203755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808496942898773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05653666035010195,0.0,0.05866050087231708,0.09553338560155107,0.05814000774272793,0.0,0.0,0.0885472725384084,0.0,0.060911041814030974,0.03576173160385452,0.0,0.14328129372147005,0.0,0.11510013132921187,0.0579351796702097,0.0,0.0,0.04852611904845943,0.0,0.3899335767463203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04911370950779481,0.05729638522775603,0.0,0.07325059343448696,0.05015919876037207,0.1401612388391264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05607604820643945,0.0,0.10648457411666658,0.0,0.05068181024663417,0.0,0.13410472840709756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869136068825156,0.0,0.09454336430554948,0.0,0.04434975600578228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056909398267325426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668676007880347,0.0,0.0,0.06398376752538391,0.0,0.0,0.05989730551405996,0.057877123503608324,0.11005442722144558,0.09857596184417224,0.06134904303568992,0.0,0.0609495614111788,0.04520050179239042,0.0,0.17614589570943473,0.0,0.0,0.039167145502256695,0.08127263646182815,0.0,0.048964829381032304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047143016127736116,0.0,0.10493939794095147,0.037014411885060564,0.11243855418708748,0.11141728607922773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852196774949804,0.1178726723035278,0.08152669703594763,0.12335010394806385,0.08553547330322872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03757547813551518,0.04217348417887107,0.0,0.0,0.061572503250511626,0.06004874120943349,0.05293488144749745,0.07688639441404445,0.0968364966943902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059786265428623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03552375163341183,0.0,0.054751821917169034,0.0,0.0,0.09471082482614944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057848172196217525,0.0,0.0,0.13761055199948002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396801868792057,0.0,0.054843107036225705,0.0,0.11774690548828375,0.05910408868088845,0.0,0.09272013704787706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18196533899072026,0.0,0.0,0.05763550407002147,0.12507823589975933,0.0,0.04846719267395978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036839617190063824,0.24871828102981575,0.10896194364931404,0.08804484388644347,0.0,0.0,0.10512337479330087,0.05298643494762337,0.0,0.188240177066382,0.060315479876597675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578485588126988,0.0,0.0,0.1962409453258412,0.0,0.04447997475149697,0.06752517991575879,0.0,0.051404241930329685,0.050036495824765465,0.0,0.06376666935518882,0.0,0.0,0.04036946699294891,0.0,0.0,0.1181737992341213,0.0606276823893948,0.0,0.10712714788091496
mentalhealth,Thefanoffallfan,2020/02/29,"I can't think of a good title Never can

Hi
I'm a 16m, suicidal and currently undergoing testing to see if I have ASD or not.After those tests I'll be starting therapy, however that'll go. I've a lot of problems but I wanted to ask about one of them. I don't like doing this but I will do my best to answer comments.

I've been enduring the other problems for a long time but this problem was kind of the tipping point. You see, me and people generally don't mix well. I don't talk to people, can't work with them and just kind of dislike people in a way. 
So naturally I never wanted a relationship and was quite strongly opposed to the idea, just for myself, not other people. 
That 'recently' ""changed"" though. My mind, which was already a big problem, has kinda spilt in two now. My side, in control and hates the idea, and the other side, that really likes the idea. I hate that other side and want it gone, but it just keeps fighting and keeps going. And the big problem with that is that my mind never just stops and I'm really not that much in control of it. And the less I try thinking of something, the more it thinks of it.
It also doesn't help that the other side has munition(although I've already made sure that won't ever happen) and IT KEEPS USING IT. And I absolutely hate it. It'll just randomly pop into my mind and annoy me to hell.
I've even considered listening to it but that just seems like the worst idea ever. Sure, it MIGHT help but I don't like it and no-one should depend/care/like me.
I don't know why I'm even doing this. It's probably just another extremely stupid fucling idea that I had. I'm sorry for formatting and for typos, I just don't wanna see what I'm writing. If you've made it thus far I'm sorry for you.
I guess I just want any advice at all. Any idea on how to kill that other side would be greatly appreciated. Sorry.",1.597300105300107,3.6075428753246785,3.6395366795366786,87.50208494208496,79.98701298701299,6.447876447876448,21.574236574236565,7.534196372845213,0.8370694980694982,1457,43,304,22,37,495,174,385,0.22,0.7120000000000001,0.068,-0.9965,2,0,1,0,2,0,48.0,0,2,2,6,20,27,8,0,18,0,31,0,0,7,8,93,66,29,2,14,20,0,0,4,0,7,0,1,0,0,39,19,0,7,12,0,0,3,15,14,1,2,8,4,29,13,32,49,7,32,1,0,3,0,14,16,1,9,16,205,68,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847466128850299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546549046591947,0.056037464640243125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530427604889527,0.07347779694715778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550892660331446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353743712823768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144423623116382,0.0,0.07412809061957007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15718596961668224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256529602207014,0.12677033355739975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964836045269373,0.05877402512842859,0.0,0.07725588409063268,0.07719346368648719,0.0,0.061965446170185186,0.0,0.0,0.20754815501486687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393709715784804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47462427351281705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18685267915802525,0.07752554707080009,0.14594078406627595,0.038510365103642266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13693678644504226,0.0,0.0,0.062012523715078864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059573677681396174,0.0,0.1326097984922083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433652783948896,0.212261686997004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051511820525955966,0.0,0.16213417602785393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04748337308551045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19431956862904867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662417668210477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755506965606238,0.335252656374234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453140972892362,0.0,0.0,0.08978129545673064,0.0,0.06918877193866269,0.07523232808379084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675176602379277,0.06379195477790707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053945726538618254,0.0,0.2353234293483316,0.04959812906705288,0.0,0.0,0.05858428260188583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664864169096833,0.0,0.1320862100987681,0.0,0.0,0.05632213550709087,0.0,0.0,0.0801347423802329,0.0,0.0,0.13470011580500668,0.06884650414511362,0.0,0.04086021137359865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047575062252514,0.0,0.06845127563111708,0.0,0.0,0.06052069425902237,0.0,0.0,0.16532381371975888,0.05562079679553187,0.0,0.0,0.06300416819221498,0.0,0.06323010955629851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051014080395097326,0.0,0.0,0.04977794806965143,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jadeashb,2020/02/29,"I (23F) have been terrified of men my entire life. Can you help me understand why? I feel compelled to finally ask this question due to my most recent grocery shopping experience. I walked around for 5 mins purposely waiting for a female cashier to become available. 
I’ve been this way my entire life. 
For some background - I’ve never had a predominant male figure in my life. My dad left when I was 3 and became a verbally abusive alcoholic (not necessarily to me). My grandfather always belittled me (saying I should loose weight, not doing well enough in life). I’ve catered to women my entire life. So much so that I thought I was a lesbian because I was so scared of men. 

Turns out I’m not a lesbian. Despite being in a relationship with a girl for a year trying to figure that out. 

I’ve been with my BF for almost 3 years. He is the first man I can trust. 

I find in my professional life as well I tend to avoid men and find comfort in women. Ex. When I was a hairstylist I refused to cut men’s hair because I was so uncomfortable. 

Today while I walked around for 5 mins waiting for a female cashier to become available I’ve realized how much of my life this has taken over.

I can’t explain the fear. It’s just that I’m uncomfortable. 

I’ve started to wonder if I’ve been abused and I’ve blocked it out of my memory. 

What are your thoughts?",2.5415298507462687,4.673375884328364,4.177367164179106,84.20643880597021,77.47014925373135,6.974567164179105,26.39164179104477,7.9765259561132025,1.7117123582089555,1059,42,208,18,25,354,137,268,0.166,0.7959999999999999,0.037000000000000005,-0.9853,0,1,1,0,1,0,30.0,0,2,0,1,12,8,1,3,12,0,20,12,1,2,1,39,35,13,0,2,5,2,3,0,1,1,8,1,0,9,9,10,2,5,12,1,1,2,5,4,2,1,13,4,32,4,35,20,5,29,0,0,0,2,22,12,0,6,14,133,41,1,0.0,0.26975731878583514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216575200475133,0.11399167447812332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472180467776928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20267877457437453,0.10642256674989513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13878839880325336,0.2514488456221976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762442580562317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135478391634396,0.0,0.1280986811542611,0.05755959076224267,0.0,0.0,0.12470326597224507,0.20809057344029486,0.0968300021400377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07630278429922145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368462712230725,0.0,0.5628468684864834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16736711903488274,0.0,0.08779839158536151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275238985768751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240066173841186,0.12221872456756372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052803952472932,0.11397105865832388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805746708883074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807482996723464,0.0,0.0,0.1079045087195251,0.0,0.0,0.07728809645832936,0.1238223608605348,0.0,0.11850870874843375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035879942742568,0.0,0.13862323920506067,0.20470691988466716,0.0,0.10272051312344196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234517633375074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661505791447998
mentalhealth,tadfox,2020/02/29,"A friend of mine copes with their anxiety and depression by drawing and thinking about gore. Is this healthy? If not, how can i help them? They are young, and so am i. They are an artist, and so they  use their skills to draw whats on their mind. They have told me of some of the thoughts that go through their mind when they are in distress, and honestly im very concerned. They are often suicidal. I want to help them.",2.155357142857145,4.270779773809527,2.131190476190479,98.48464285714287,78.64285714285714,6.104761904761905,23.595238095238088,7.1686216300943375,0.5808380952380952,327,11,75,4,8,97,60,84,0.18600000000000005,0.706,0.109,-0.8201,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,12,1,6,4,0,1,3,0,8,0,0,2,0,17,14,10,1,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,17,2,11,12,1,5,0,1,0,0,16,2,0,3,2,55,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029097274989179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284529101586856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049256379509268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15074338143388158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35557280996556084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28650733253325816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5356384699769239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901321600379481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699566345586583,0.0,0.21057285589658764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534505017713539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22908429118888635,0.0,0.2188527773055645,0.15644685320587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imgayandveryhungry,2020/02/29,"Why am I like this? I'm either super happy, depressed, or this feeling of emptyness like there is so much going on around me and I know I should be upset but I'm not I'm just meh I don't know any other ways of describing it. I'm never suicidal when I'm depressed but usually when I'm feeling empty. All my friends are drifting away from me my mom is drinking again my grandpa has 2 years at most to live my sister thinks she the center of everything and that she is the most important person in the world everything revolve around her. I know this rant is all over the place but I don't feel like I can talk to anyone so that's why I put this on here.",0.10895471857807593,2.3656672589928083,2.285154464663563,93.2423571730851,88.64028776978418,5.284976724502752,19.687261955141768,6.794906146795322,0.3246958104104949,515,16,112,7,17,173,84,139,0.09699999999999999,0.715,0.188,0.8842,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,10,9,0,1,4,0,12,1,0,0,3,24,26,10,1,1,7,3,3,3,1,1,0,0,0,1,8,4,1,0,7,1,0,3,4,3,0,0,0,3,17,6,14,24,6,21,0,2,0,0,9,11,0,3,9,77,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11363671048866306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684326975345595,0.0,0.0,0.2975166575768933,0.0,0.0,0.15700006828546845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878535199161281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16369867774195035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003652884338475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534789904523348,0.11937940438908885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291044315527833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496927160976372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17788572267629002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27550859572240793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24491628185475603,0.0,0.14755623141729185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19571063338663947,0.0,0.0,0.12284094856035327,0.0,0.128881201595772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459091014561196,0.17458851356544064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798605915253928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18278507253372706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431217301181572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707374105417773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840418692134133,0.0,0.0,0.1326396809175673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015714279233048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760974372566053
mentalhealth,Richard14114,2020/02/29,"We need you: Project Men's Issues on Wikipedia Hi people,

The [**WikiProject Men's Issues**](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia:WikiProject_Men%27s_Issues) is a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of Men's Issues articles on Wikipedia. We need you to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join the [discussion](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wikipedia_talk:WikiProject_Men%27s_Issues) and see a list of open tasks. You can share this project to people who might want to participate. Your input about men's mental health and suicide would be helpful. Thank you to everyone.

Regards,  
Richard",11.46066666666666,15.607019677777787,6.759722222222222,66.63625000000002,57.77777777777778,8.944444444444445,36.80555555555557,9.516144504307137,4.145222222222223,521,23,64,10,8,137,57,90,0.05,0.772,0.179,0.8271,0,0,0,0,0,1,40.0,2,6,0,1,2,2,0,0,6,0,6,1,0,0,0,10,11,2,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,2,10,8,1,5,0,0,1,0,17,4,0,1,0,35,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261739001768151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25159759031052525,0.0,0.0,0.1586528506842159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49409984901856296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385346651289145,0.2510978603455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3510153007365836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3281914647087861,0.0,0.0,0.25982196674082464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886166746387602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589078409547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179185778812091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13960988324214305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814258906022125,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,twnori,2020/02/29,"I’m feeling overwhelmed by fear constantly because I don’t know what I’m doing at work Hi guys, A little about me: I’ve been working in the game industry for over 10 years as an artist. About half a year ago, I left the industry and process I’m familiar with and entered the tech industry. It’s been a very confusing and frustrating few months, mainly because I am very unfamiliar with this new industry, and I have no mentor that can ease me into it. After a recent re-org, I got promoted to a lead position, despise me still not having a clue on how everything works. It also doesn’t help that our product designer and pm don’t define a clear process for us either.

I really have no idea what I’m doing. And I really hate this feeling.

I still don’t understand how the process work here, if there is even one (our company is faux-flat-structure and is very disorganized)

I fear I will disappoint our leadership.

I fear my artists will lose trust and faith in me.

I fear that I go into a meeting, trying to lead but only see everyone with confusion on their face.

I fear for the unknown.

This is all too far out of my comfort zone.

I feel like these fear has slowly taken over my life, even tho people who love me like my wife try to make me feel better, but fear always find it’s way to creep back into my heart. It is so disabling i feel like curling up into a ball on my bed because I am so scared about Mondays eventually comes up again. 

I don’t want to quit the job because I’ve been wanting learn how to lead a team for so long, now I finally have a shot, I don’t want to give it up.

How do I deal with this fear?
How do I tackle my job optimistically?
How do I be a good leader?
How do I know what to do?",4.390238156209989,4.52685931830986,5.7606466069142135,82.50222471190783,69.90140845070422,9.271446862996159,29.094110115236877,9.218907990703514,2.2226619718309863,1338,46,287,25,22,453,183,355,0.149,0.7190000000000001,0.132,-0.8494,2,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,4,0,1,12,25,26,3,12,19,0,32,4,2,11,2,52,56,24,0,4,5,1,5,3,0,2,1,0,1,1,18,18,0,0,11,5,0,6,9,17,0,2,5,6,42,9,39,48,4,42,1,3,1,1,16,19,0,3,19,192,60,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927148491457509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06249312135168091,0.06502351716458883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008925166802748,0.0,0.19054767511090606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911355802921487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731563692111255,0.0,0.0844477849233697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056482825697588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032290506788424,0.0,0.0,0.074671604993772,0.07023235371441139,0.0,0.0,0.7034854811840517,0.1975641749356256,0.11165466687562073,0.0,0.08560484022671516,0.07142379212428446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496451609276551,0.04441202584010248,0.06554494048326194,0.06250028833431605,0.0,0.0,0.07737657027396734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715274130102212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260308009373652,0.052379443375942934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821703037277523,0.0,0.0,0.15509518097262018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589371182903728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490557693703467,0.0,0.05519664836045527,0.1145341862059408,0.07832256274052526,0.0,0.06915652224328755,0.0,0.08742509598222557,0.0,0.0,0.07052958283842202,0.0,0.05216288935253218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06237518541864485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07547364422735715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052953576959099725,0.059433357894877664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05417641778274045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831176153775623,0.0,0.0,0.10012432625403382,0.0,0.07715949229136758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823752001079806,0.0,0.06227203851927069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12481458042826328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611165789699198,0.0,0.0,0.08135247299891828,0.0939997053546917,0.0,0.0,0.19343526279731493,0.13827714930680468,0.06202845232444972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275641224842817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006465910074327
mentalhealth,GuyTiberiusKirk,2020/02/29,"What is it called when you completely mentally disconnect from emotional trauma? I apologize if thisi s the wrong sub for this - if there is one that it would fit better on, please say something, but I want to know what mental traits (I don't want to call them illnesses or disorders) cause a person to be completely unable to process mental or emotional trauma.

For example, I'm writing a story, and my character has a flaw where she undergoes something mentally or emotionally stressful, and any time she experiences feelings of guilt, remorse, or shame, she feels a mass of....something building up in her chest, and where as a normal person might have a very emotional reaction such as crying, screaming in anger at someone, giving a tearful apology, something very emotional, very dramatic, she just...doesn't. Her brain immediately disengages and puts her on autopilot, and she will remove herself from the situation quickly yet calmly, then go into the next room (or, if possible, her bedroom) and start doing some mundane task and thinking about the task, not about the emotionally harrowing event that happened five minutes prior. Her brain just acts as if it didn't happen. I've also touched on how this is not normal behavior because I describe her facial expression as being almost doll-like afterwards, further signifying that in her mind, something isn't connecting, or something disconnected, and this is a coping mechanism, albeit a flawed one.

To give an example, let's say you found out your mother was very badly injured in a car accident (and you have an amazing relationship with your mother, just wanted to say this because the last time I tried to use this example, people were like ""well i hate my mother so i'd celebrate lmfaooooo"") and right when you're about to cry or scream or freak out or have a meltdown, you just...leave the room. You don't speak, you don't do anything normal, you just calmly stand up if you were sitting first, and calmly walk out of the room. And as you're leaving the room, you remember you have clothes in the dryer, so you autopilot into the laundry room and take the clothes out, start folding them, then go put them away, and your brain doesn't process anything about if your mother is okay, almost as if you never found out about the car accident.

My question is, what mental trait(s) cause this in a person? If there is an actual mental illness or disorder that covers it, what is it called? Anyone who can relate, can you (if it's not too triggering, of course) share a time when you had a similar disconnect and what you felt when/if your brain finally processed the information, for better or for worse?",10.791688401501679,8.808305529045649,9.886324836988742,65.06322959889354,58.02489626556016,13.247342422446152,42.246986761509575,11.855464076750405,5.0713517881841526,2123,93,348,49,21,675,231,482,0.156,0.742,0.102,-0.9911,0,0,6,0,0,0,79.0,0,20,3,3,24,22,2,3,31,1,33,9,6,5,1,79,55,51,0,16,27,4,4,1,0,3,3,6,6,3,22,23,0,0,10,0,0,9,10,12,1,4,8,10,45,10,49,41,1,62,0,0,0,0,61,31,0,25,21,246,67,0,0.0,0.0,0.0606596307468677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448941974349548,0.0,0.0,0.049709688013578536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04227123638770317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04346403072406126,0.0,0.1023055050049747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058401787334759876,0.0,0.0519013778513617,0.07578486461071196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995173013703906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775664717995603,0.1904183028770215,0.0,0.0,0.127711806487965,0.0,0.0,0.13034809469195865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656066716217874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424825180635727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195328263325709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06080484605070172,0.0,0.0,0.06286038070297695,0.0,0.05968377838721671,0.06809373268739423,0.0,0.05287364553315743,0.0,0.13631144616918736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925993218004073,0.07065443046566916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993655821216457,0.0,0.0,0.06137057353693834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03416175672616501,0.050669061774381116,0.0,0.131637878889029,0.0,0.06356326984252278,0.0,0.03036845517309768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3758586693006453,0.06594241246703304,0.06276433278817205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047941969766272165,0.0,0.06610834191677109,0.0,0.18271212413859786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424305692866678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04309422809140702,0.16282831733459027,0.0,0.06823350575446767,0.0,0.07007656563136654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497683865961792,0.0696339281352967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673705853020905,0.07041567042056039,0.053084683172993655,0.0,0.14829745017623128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987094826212721,0.0,0.0,0.0526683460903084,0.2871248997201851,0.0,0.0,0.08799497042947241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07120458346074457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0467369211264115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03982990531451907,0.0,0.0,0.1087387717801101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04220286404786188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368666925413781,0.0,0.2051555191248893,0.10999152871187784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05588970815322823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334680729006502,0.04415699897174632,0.06796269205894018,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Goopygum,2020/02/29,"My life is in a state of constant self destruction but i'm held on by a tiny thread of sanity Hey, that title was pretty extreme huh? I think it is a good way to describe the way my mind is working. I feel depressed everyday, I feel like I want to just explode and be nonexistent. It might be a little suicidal but it feels more like a desire to not exist anymore, the pain of nothing in my life hurts so much. No motivation to live a real life. I want to sink into my bed and never come back out.

I do have these spontaneous thoughts of ""I should just not ever do anything again"" or ""I should get eviscerated by a car"" or ""I want to drown myself in the bathtub"" but these thoughts never bear fruit and I refuse to tell my therapist about those thoughts because I WILL NOT be institutionalized again, that experience alone scarred me to the core and made my life feel worse.

I want to be around people, feel like i'm needed, feel the warmth of another human, feel the kick of a goal, or have a crush that I actively try to pursue and go out with friends. I want my friend who killed himself back, he would get this, he would understand, i miss him.

If you have any words for me then please save the fake sentiments, you are a stranger to me and I to you.",4.24235994397759,4.999317694444446,4.941176470588236,86.03911764705884,70.46825396825396,8.310364145658264,27.521942110177413,8.4952907291091,1.6772639589169005,977,32,210,15,17,315,140,252,0.175,0.643,0.182,-0.4338,0,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,3,0,3,10,14,2,0,17,1,20,6,0,2,3,59,47,15,3,12,12,0,7,3,2,6,5,0,1,2,11,12,1,2,13,0,0,3,6,7,0,0,6,8,32,7,31,31,2,25,0,3,0,0,15,9,0,5,13,141,43,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067609379889487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266935806942944,0.11205340532184296,0.0,0.0,0.10597770916965173,0.0,0.0,0.08793775639175559,0.09512922552977296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16433950889021465,0.0,0.06514166527006449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205156001413377,0.0,0.11547911744553616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203949331328827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966621765967496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045308703414309,0.0,0.0,0.3782260388898745,0.2290252325950089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16512157250091014,0.0,0.11166125223642333,0.0,0.06073174746545777,0.08963020032906338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439724698233125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822621131345724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019172258645257,0.1566211209969174,0.10710311027762108,0.0943604982063304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111475927062427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336296718595243,0.10789946458011164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855536153883348,0.07923631042577634,0.1648360665652293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253631301624652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370797256477512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408418015450152,0.0,0.0,0.11730163311348812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087163738516311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163157044984164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147965627089854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688893341404147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934014986918072,0.0,0.0,0.12407422209194666,0.0,0.06847241525242563,0.0,0.25450784079036354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255181776376153,0.0,0.0,0.1112463967225634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31514785890722025,0.16964307441432291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779630943132188,0.0,0.10890080856154027,0.15182242317770142,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,calliage_soup,2020/02/29,"Covering scars in swimsuits Obviously, general swimsuits show arms. Problem is, I have cuts all over my arms, and I am not looking to have anyone find out about that. So, what I’m the world am I going to do? I don’t think I’m strong enough to quit in time for the summer season, so is there any other possible way? If not, tips for quitting?",2.409130434782611,4.208425492753626,3.9442753623188413,87.26684782608696,76.68115942028986,6.918840579710146,24.54347826086957,7.793537801064563,1.2547565217391297,265,9,55,4,6,88,50,69,0.08,0.871,0.049,-0.2824,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,4,3,1,0,2,0,8,2,2,0,2,11,13,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,1,5,1,10,13,2,10,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,1,3,37,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19651503993874372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20206022968664306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29859166013797245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641207783036417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423293250122747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24266885073758115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3257794252222073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765130459546309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.614727630985035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18516551921618374,0.0,0.0,0.16850547326688028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22937739116954126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imtrying99,2020/02/29,"Drug use, need educated. Hi there i was wondering if someone could at least give me an insight why even small use of cocaine or mdma seems to exarcerbate ocd, rumination and general anxiety and after a fee weeks it dissipates, i know these drugs negatively effect neurotransmitters but sometimes i wonder why no one else I know suffers from this😓",10.326236559139787,9.51139183870968,10.170000000000003,58.95833333333336,58.03225806451614,13.427956989247313,43.24731182795699,12.45797560212912,5.685305376344086,282,14,44,8,3,93,55,62,0.135,0.865,0.0,-0.8074,0,0,3,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,3,0,17,11,5,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,7,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,5,0,5,9,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,5,2,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15304011846522106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15972616836137168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4639963017113456,0.0,0.16711874342840025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213322425501278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919092184015225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198879678262464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483368819523686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13556119742319547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18212088176815447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950439175888715,0.0,0.1978576888210581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3455633940689742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047057649992458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3610337180223311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43389823277646544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TeodorWithoutH,2020/02/29,"I randomly get depressed or have suicidal thoughts. I sometimes randomly get very sad or depressed. Even suicidal thoughts can come to mind. I dont know why since everything in my life is well. Only thing that I really hate is school. For no reason I just dont like it. I'm trying to figure out why I sometimes feel this way, this sad. Would anyone have any idea of what this could mean or why I'm feeling like this?",2.4272590361445765,4.654289240963858,3.3839608433734973,89.28027861445786,78.27710843373494,7.041566265060243,24.832831325301214,8.07648339933343,1.4940373493975905,329,12,67,6,8,105,55,83,0.337,0.626,0.037000000000000005,-0.9837,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,8,1,0,0,0,9,1,0,1,0,20,21,3,2,2,4,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,9,0,0,1,3,5,1,0,2,2,7,3,6,17,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,5,2,37,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995107310356104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231868856250828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260520014670158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683413978924748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520709555464057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3429998666858221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665086035550084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13151370407169646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147979642221908,0.10453956076578927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529047886701033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14447248669811738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16519093854814645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042020238306243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335857043527877,0.1429807799790886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939837156639974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775353579509287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129202751708847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374398206057152,0.15045359664675292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14809572649053468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104728549983595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894520429714065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201267638250209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721643278621186,0.0,0.0,0.23234241560380664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993497756886265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073916821869166,0.0,0.1161514756602712,0.0,0.0,0.13156997975371618,0.0,0.39612542183401456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395000533496176,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,destinyasoiaf,2020/02/29,fixing my hair my depression got so bad that i stopped brushing my hair for a while and everytime i tried it got me more depressed. today i’m (very nervously) at a solon to get the mats out of it.,2.979674796747968,3.976156073170735,4.418048780487805,87.72918699186995,73.6341463414634,8.393495934959349,28.300813008130078,8.841846274778883,2.012261788617886,153,6,34,3,3,51,33,41,0.293,0.7070000000000001,0.0,-0.9224,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,6,0,5,2,1,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,21,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747505798767889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5668361921765082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719197834344682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.526357199157001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751081180447241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31190952389298005,0.0,0.0,0.22340950952821614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715081958224359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Martinblast98,2020/02/29,"Anxiety and depression are not part of you, Emotional freedom is. Emotions like anxiety and depression are just happenings within the space of awareness that you are

These sensations cannot define you, your true nature includes and goes way beyond this sensations

We should not blame ourselves to feel anxiety or depression, the more we realize that every sensation is meant to be felt the more at ease we’ll be able to be while experiencing them

Judging ourselves and try to change from a place of control and force won’t work, true change can be realized only from a space of pure acceptance.

So instead of blaming yourself and entering into a negative spiral allow to simply accept those sensations by being close to them

The more you’ll accept the inner pain the faster you’ll realize that it was all an illusion and from there it will be clear to you that emotional freedom is all that there is and that will always be.

​

*(answering all public and private questions)*",8.805852272727275,9.278104244318186,8.236500000000003,67.3585,60.53409090909091,12.04,38.62272727272728,11.602472056035307,4.927833636363637,801,37,123,22,10,253,100,176,0.128,0.6940000000000001,0.17800000000000002,0.8201,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,3,7,2,2,6,10,0,0,10,0,24,1,0,2,7,38,28,12,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,7,1,0,0,0,11,13,0,1,11,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,3,3,12,6,20,11,7,13,0,3,0,0,14,9,0,2,3,100,23,1,0.14966446819111348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245328269055788,0.16216138875591712,0.1818587104445808,0.0,0.0,0.34347872554961417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3166503250918216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678614273043726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3867173614425375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5050571472849222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609876942659645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567485203153676,0.0,0.14370135998625158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13234779494690505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311849931388306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382657219857137,0.1592535462849391,0.0,0.0,0.16207203435502066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15636751480144978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765845669667373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161234966805613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879668854253204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089575153383438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818587104445808,0.0
mentalhealth,numberwhy,2020/02/29,"Lately I've been really paranoid I think there are cameras in my mirror, in my eyes and on my phone. I think my parents are watching me. I am so scared to sleep with my back not against a wall because I believe someone is under my bed and is trying to kill me. 
I don't always feel like this but I used to, it went away and now it's back. I don't know what to do I have no one trustworthy to talk with about this. 
I even used to believe my cat was a fake. I know it sounds dumb af. I know that it's not true but when I get those thoughts I can't help but believe it. Although I really do believe my parents are watching my phone.. 
The reason I wrote this is because I was recently home alone and thought I heard footsteps upstairs so I spent an hour locked in the bathroom, I am terrified when I'm home alone, I always think someone has broken in. I don't know what to do.
I just need some advice, this is the best sub I could find for this.",0.8837597707139153,2.636092331683169,2.517701928087547,95.94790776446068,81.12871287128712,5.242730588848358,22.512767066180306,6.05967700443912,0.17057029702970272,729,24,170,5,19,239,104,202,0.19699999999999998,0.7509999999999999,0.052000000000000005,-0.9791,2,2,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,1,11,7,2,1,6,0,22,2,2,3,1,31,41,12,1,2,6,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,14,6,0,0,12,0,1,1,7,4,0,1,9,6,34,3,19,31,2,17,0,0,3,0,8,8,1,1,9,119,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225680068021017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379565444693881,0.0,0.0,0.19117428807772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793103628104704,0.17666715689464565,0.0,0.14005631240303926,0.0,0.0,0.5177096642215387,0.12055667405870185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172020308419994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587539529165119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808543145609645,0.08206838995063746,0.0,0.0,0.10499580156982953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06001866532619112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699985508286568,0.0,0.2304626638961009,0.0,0.11313103314456248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12709474893908335,0.0,0.2525343125888548,0.0,0.12958663580506508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0561232624320064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518008712740527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784385417586832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551153678997778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471867227854324,0.11811303155123234,0.11342750784998848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150122512688081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496029645886895,0.0,0.1946703836357576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233404912898567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22082627014122527,0.0,0.18239954162966315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779941686476915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843426413863005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649243898944673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Drivethru22,2020/02/29,"I was diagnosed as having manic depression, which is the same thing as bipolar. My family does not believe me. Told my brother this, who has scoliosis. He told me, “well, do you know the exact curvature of my spine?”  How would you make them see your point, or understand how this makes me feel?",2.6784242424242386,5.3461477818181855,3.861363636363638,83.7053787878788,80.27272727272728,8.03030303030303,23.71212121212121,8.841846274778883,2.0985757575757567,228,8,43,6,6,74,45,55,0.07,0.894,0.036000000000000004,-0.4515,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,3,1,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,6,3,1,4,1,12,14,5,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,2,11,1,3,10,1,1,0,1,1,0,9,1,0,1,0,33,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29037079443781577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22198043919604507,0.26158813008393234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225539195084246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24296268238426716,0.0,0.13031483893607654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416403711132088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34407040277573325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436359253015871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20537556144741573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712227924092052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4925396105357877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683035631171473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23172810074398226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18308232131438887,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,weabootrapstars,2020/02/29,"Harm Reduction Discord  we are a drug harm reduction based community with an active friendly environment, We want to provide a safe place for people too socialize and have a great time, if you ever feel like you need someone to Vent too we will have users here for you :) this won't be reposted or spammed out just a one time thing if you see this and need friends we'll be here

[https://discord.gg/pGCYAhP](https://discord.gg/pGCYAhP)",10.238999999999999,10.452502466666672,8.2425,69.36375000000001,57.66666666666666,11.233333333333334,36.08333333333333,10.686352973137794,3.654533333333333,355,13,61,7,4,105,53,75,0.106,0.645,0.249,0.9022,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,4,4,0,0,6,7,0,0,5,0,8,1,0,0,1,17,13,5,0,5,4,0,1,1,2,3,1,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,8,5,6,8,0,5,0,0,1,0,11,2,0,3,4,41,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941528690091631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22944047682650004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825279865909714,0.18120723955663515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3919379188718194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27964944772164185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12392032384616668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3761557516318958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718794524925218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17584861233634522,0.0,0.2650097205911441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021257958561038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585637025458382,0.21491638171093905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16851344405588495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295810103758864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14960903543517895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arianope,2020/02/29,"Just need to tell somebody how I feel This week was my last week at work. My boss made me work for more then 60 hours this week. Well, today was my last day and I actually wanted to leave as quick as possible after the shift change. Because i was extremely exhausted and wanted to go for a goodbye drink aswell. Unfortunately my co-worker got sick and couldn’t show up for work. So my boss told me I have to cover his shift too and made me work for another 13 hours straight instead of coming in herself ( she was off the whole last week and left today 5 hours earlier!) I was so angry and tired. Everyone I told about it didn‘t really understand how I felt, how disappointed I was and that i literally was crying in the bathroom. Everyone I asked for company after work to cheer me up, had something else better up. Even my mom didn‘t even listen to me, she interrupted me in the middle of the sentence to tell me how wel my brother did on his soccer match. I just feel like nobody really care about me, i feel very lonely right now. I know it‘s not much of a big deal actually, but for me it is.",3.888133561643837,5.100545447488589,5.265933219178084,81.68739297945207,71.69406392694064,8.580022831050231,25.10302511415525,9.017664075816787,1.798116210045662,859,25,174,17,16,288,122,219,0.09,0.853,0.057,-0.7344,0,2,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,6,17,8,0,0,7,0,14,4,0,8,0,30,33,17,0,4,4,2,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,8,1,0,6,3,0,2,4,3,1,0,17,5,34,5,31,15,3,34,0,2,0,0,14,14,0,0,19,120,40,7,0.0,0.0,0.1968409382492424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575583891303282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428632562579572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061480607742714674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919853886276688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282895584854476,0.0,0.106691799920618,0.08687812676988255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107850868904845,0.06504348678164598,0.10397764446180456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880004380723738,0.0,0.0,0.08425187130472245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322828040268175,0.0,0.0,0.19274360197652274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15298679076921542,0.07205122573999452,0.0968371451602204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057318533813554125,0.0,0.08066339741279208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979672056025645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05542757319346128,0.2466322050697536,0.0,0.10679146604842554,0.1095798511904476,0.0,0.0,0.04927292777628128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19086392176016656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812080231108027,0.0,0.0,0.0741404345257902,0.07478311308240071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369947985444245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292212969661264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613008943328766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07764353046631882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17630439381142313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591861934911073,0.19119853911305296,0.19274360197652274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049941853855768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321639196929763,0.11897443403759653,0.0,0.32360095778864445,0.0,0.0906812525554803,0.0,0.0,0.11260162085977735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4405442535878131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,guccimanesdog,2020/02/29,l-tyrosine? anyone ever try this supplement that is supposedly said to improve mental health (decrease effects of depression and ADD)? i found it in GNC when looking for workout supplements and it looks pretty legitimate from what i’ve read.,8.034308943089433,10.286240073170733,8.159512195121952,60.904796747967474,62.90243902439025,11.320325203252034,40.495934959349604,11.20814326018867,5.647871544715446,197,11,26,6,3,64,38,41,0.08199999999999999,0.775,0.14300000000000002,0.4137,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,6,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,5,3,0,3,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,16,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20513383796745027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25268249269910864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265373470158617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3216693165102536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31184271533809804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4927203416936526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956518684628786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984667054666656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934532708365267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27906574153545466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991816067478498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigfloppydong420,2020/02/29,Episode So my week has been really stressful between school and family issues which lead into my dementia ridden grandfathers wife screaming and threatening my mother and aunt and for them to “watch their backs”. Yesterday I feel like it was the perfect storm and when I looked outside I saw what looked like her car twice (now thinking it was a delusion) and later in the night I couldn’t shake the paranoia and anxiety of everything and my breathing got very fast and heavy and my heart was jumping out of my chest and I started to see shit around my room like things just darting around. Also looked through my blinds and thought i saw her eyes peeking through them and I about lost it. Probably should have checked myself into the psych ward last night but I’m gonna see a school counselor Monday and if she recommends me to one I’ll go to get checked out. This just really scared me and I wanted to see if anyone else has had this. Slept for 13 hours last night and I feel really calm and at ease today. Thank you,3.9677160864345744,6.142331239795919,3.7166746698679463,88.95101440576235,73.33673469387755,7.060744297719087,25.81512605042017,7.928766900206844,1.4542482593037214,817,28,158,12,17,246,123,196,0.098,0.804,0.098,0.4595,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,3,3,10,12,1,3,6,0,10,7,6,1,1,37,32,23,0,5,5,3,2,3,0,2,1,1,1,0,8,23,0,0,4,0,2,6,1,6,0,2,11,14,27,6,21,18,0,31,0,1,11,0,10,9,1,2,19,101,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383264747365127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099326906340768,0.0,0.0,0.09078683774323124,0.13303597070891385,0.0,0.2311694680774969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983860544091687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846428990494948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669142245968345,0.0,0.12240117968176653,0.0,0.1313015633453349,0.09275740604507716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783581002738875,0.0,0.07379081285915022,0.0,0.10384455545272654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15386050116199887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786581025899307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355187649810554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116731381457421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902991484947344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32709758290508656,0.0,0.1417352151053734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3655368883050951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798264464854058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13998900365550182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24953563640150075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12999204806522965,0.2628091286206869,0.3103959515792285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332784402508933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190110730087477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873077479319774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195388203398536,0.0,0.0,0.08625963285236618,0.08319594595527714,0.0,0.10307810568450906,0.0,0.0,0.123072719066114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713123309459223,0.07658273522529963,0.0,0.1041494614765295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway-exgf5,2020/02/29,"How to help struggling friend Throwaway because he's on Reddit and I don't want him to find me. 2 years ago I was seeing this guy. We got together shortly after meeting through a mutual friend at a wedding. It didn't start out as anything serious, he was fun in bed and that was about it. 

After a short period of time, I realized something was really wrong. He was always a bit quirky, but the things he was saying were starting to get... unsettling. Not scary - I never felt afraid for my safety - but just, odd. A bunch of other things seemed off about him. We had a serious conversation about it and after some really odd chats I found out he has bipolar II and was in a manic state.

I was a bit more cautious after that, but mostly worried. By this point, sex lives aside, we had become very good friends. We were sleeping together a couple times a week, but we never went on a date, neither of us was interested in a relationship or cared if the other dated anyone else. I was worried my friend was struggling and that no one else knew about it. I felt that because I was entrusted with this information, I had a duty to help him.

I stopped having sex with him, with the exception of a couple occasions. I stuck around and hung out with him on so many nights where I thought he might leave the house and hurt himself or someone else if I wasn't there to make him stay in. I tried reaching out to his family - the only one I was able to reach was his sister after I found her number written on a paper in his kitchen. She said she ""couldn't deal with another episode"" and hung up on me. I texted her and never got a response. I didn't know any of his friends. I didn't know what to do. I was scared for his safety.

At some point I realized I was being dragged down with my own mental state because I was trying so hard to make sure my friend was ok. I started distancing myself from the situation because I knew I couldn't feel ok until I lost the weight of the responsibility of trying to support him. I'd purpose see him every few weeks to kind of keep tabs and make sure he wasn't dead or in jail, but not to spend so much time together. One night he came over after a couple months, and he told me he'd been back to see his doctor. Back on meds and in therapy. Off alcohol. He seemed different, and I believed he was changing. I was happy for him, but I continued to keep my distance. 

We stayed friends, occasionally talking or going for a coffee, and then drifted to the point where we mostly stopped talking. I'd heard through mutual friends that he'd gotten a new job and was doing well. I never told anyone about his mental health issue. This post is the first time I've discussed it outside of my talks with him. I didn't feel it was appropriate to discuss someone's health issues with others. 

I haven't spoken to him in almost a year now, but I believe he's back in this serious manic state again. A friend mentioned seeing him and him being very strange. When she told me this I looked up his social media (where he appears to have deleted everyone and made his accounts public) and there's some really, really odd posts. Way more out there than when I experienced his mania last time. I feel compelled to reach out and support my friend, just like I did back then..... But I'm also really worried I'm going to end up in a bad place again if I do.

How can I reach out to help someone I care about? Is it even appropriate for me to do so after we lost touch?",4.390221337823355,5.201660329496407,5.338747895300781,83.12408694321142,70.16546762589928,8.101943976733509,27.449104546150323,8.265842613841098,1.719296035512016,2719,88,548,38,47,893,287,695,0.094,0.74,0.16699999999999998,0.9959,2,0,2,0,0,0,77.0,9,0,0,3,33,37,0,4,32,2,54,10,1,7,6,112,107,47,1,6,20,1,8,1,10,1,5,3,2,1,24,44,3,5,18,1,2,6,18,12,1,4,57,17,95,25,98,43,14,105,0,3,5,2,89,42,0,18,50,386,119,4,0.05420788890968095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048052022801574376,0.05793174757273166,0.05428137042971574,0.0,0.0,0.04335002917630102,0.045105306076295336,0.0,0.0,0.03686322332630012,0.05684169799470413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580683264369018,0.05554238817990665,0.044608473761195484,0.048256513869457465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673008207301016,0.045261322974551176,0.13217850375962895,0.05986835440320844,0.0,0.12214745559232995,0.0,0.0,0.11836194993847007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06199938376629401,0.11053711101966288,0.0,0.05734475875687845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17993999408410974,0.0,0.0,0.0558859532054666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056635706349592835,0.0,0.055484071283986726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585120613897955,0.0,0.04801209982011962,0.0,0.0,0.03580379937806793,0.0,0.04567248437348393,0.051797960881244616,0.0,0.0,0.05110237328548061,0.0,0.08222741219266218,0.0,0.10409614857091808,0.0,0.04954502840473833,0.04610920261446173,0.0,0.11887230446676605,0.4188088050313707,0.0,0.02832138460720216,0.0,0.06161518497732365,0.04546700534157097,0.08671000149193063,0.0,0.0,0.05367433257273792,0.0,0.0577053057359538,0.04855962094858727,0.0,0.0,0.11524090207165222,0.0,0.0,0.10900321584870518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254862571128954,0.05803066623203899,0.0,0.0,0.1131579047400446,0.05379296532838272,0.09636492472993828,0.0,0.05644917456474225,0.05958247617198601,0.04418666449194431,0.0,0.057398327354086565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02648323637503761,0.0,0.047866559041811696,0.0,0.045520974078444514,0.0,0.11834862848289418,0.0,0.0,0.05129281517826079,0.10855256033510363,0.05495829108981875,0.0,0.0,0.0602127442848656,0.0,0.10925760437883507,0.05750600373152032,0.0,0.0,0.04326821975428037,0.0,0.03984903558825399,0.0,0.167233862949978,0.05235431689970616,0.0,0.10174086319726668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019800530917456,0.04122754221683931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056635706349592835,0.0,0.15373192967334545,0.0,0.10383234626193563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17363480853933624,0.0,0.0,0.058198985952895424,0.0,0.0,0.05156411583476126,0.04310828900632428,0.05427155344127014,0.0,0.17278667656791735,0.09869765231489776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06093193835599345,0.05424703719875653,0.055258116182999056,0.13779050508577267,0.04173188124050916,0.0,0.0,0.11510586833023563,0.11555679397719475,0.0,0.0906404447941632,0.0,0.11333971056585085,0.0,0.0,0.12302893988431847,0.1021805875467206,0.0,0.0,0.13071074324179366,0.0,0.0,0.061991445232583424,0.0,0.07202662537976781,0.0,0.0,0.04303500871433742,0.15804527975764993,0.0,0.0,0.15539388264373385,0.0,0.1104107948111768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520541591702682,0.0,0.0,0.08945437091974721,0.031973217356902395,0.043027699046966655,0.08696459742778485,0.0660106050016932,0.04873940223554778,0.05025125610487368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16515222750397907,0.0,0.0,0.059267816825771424,0.0,0.06981620636476799
mentalhealth,xxitypelikethisxx,2020/02/29,"I feel like the universe is purposefully pushing me and provoking me I've always suffered from depression and anxiety and all that, and have been drawn to dark things blah blah blah. I'm extremely nihilistic. However, lately, it seems as if the universe, or the human race itself has been knowingly pushing my buttons and provoking me like I'm some element that doesn't belong in the environment. I spend most of my time alone, but it's not unhealthily. I simply don't want to be around most people. I do work with others, often. I'm a photographer and meet new people constantly. 

I recently moved to a new apartment complex that contains a long main road out to the nearest highway. There are no turnoffs, except to other apartment buildings in the complex. And nearly every day, no matter the time of day, whatever driver is coming the opposite will slowly drift into my lane causing me to either slam on my breaks, or swerve out of the way. Sometimes in the middle of the day. 21 times this has happened so far. I've thought maybe I'm over exaggerating and there's plenty of room, but no. I just got home after having to drive my car onto the curb and into the grass halfway down this main road. So I get out of the car, ready to confront this guy as I can't fathom it anymore, and he speeds away after stopping briefly. I didn't feel an urge for violence against him, I merely wanted to understand what is happening in the brains of these people who are seemingly oblivious to others' existences. Do they do this with everyone? Is this just human disconnect taking shape, or is it just me? What's the provocation for if you don't stick around for the aftermath? 

I'm cut in front of in line at an alarming rate. At gas stations, two nights ago at Subway. Last week, a BRAND NEW Tesla pulled out of a shopping center, causing me to swerve into oncoming traffic. I've never had any issue with driving aside from the mild annoyance. But lately, I seem to not exist on the road and it's strange. There is no deep, dark fear or hatred of driving. It's simply happening repeatedly everywhere I go. I drive a basic car. Not beaten down, not a BMW. My lights work just fine. I don't drive that often. It's not high statistical rates that sway my vision. It's actually as often as I'm describing. I've had people bump into me while holding the door for them. And it never feels like I'm invisible or they're ignorant, it always feel purposeful as if there's so game that I'm not keen to everyone playing, which consists of them purposefully trying to provoke me. 

Now I'm an average looking individual. No physical deformities. Nothing out of the ordinary. I look around pensively as I like to judge colors of things. I don't ignore people, I'm polite. So I don't see any outward reason for these things. Do other humans sense something that I don't? That I don't belong? Do they sense some weakness? Is this me just growing more and more tired of the little things?",3.8056899817720438,5.8901113817863395,5.053117695414418,79.58962972229173,73.53590192644485,7.953693841809929,27.41488259051432,8.724045039944539,2.2879977912005427,2353,90,423,47,49,779,269,571,0.142,0.8079999999999999,0.05,-0.9935,1,1,1,0,0,0,68.0,0,1,4,3,22,18,4,2,32,0,34,3,1,7,3,91,67,35,0,5,24,0,4,7,0,1,2,0,3,4,39,29,0,6,13,3,2,17,23,11,0,1,7,9,42,7,78,58,10,91,0,2,4,0,14,44,0,18,32,291,81,3,0.0,0.0,0.08671802983624728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877219693579231,0.0,0.0,0.0920358631698691,0.0,0.0,0.14788322513551766,0.0,0.0,0.12086055563314455,0.0,0.06798039114381065,0.0,0.08812878739574416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23732226401726944,0.0,0.0,0.083490253307343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992011379178197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18257473890139475,0.0,0.0765481007798127,0.0,0.0960299545040569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17192896185779202,0.0,0.07653806637048538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487139404040025,0.16982590690338978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999622668266403,0.17972837296244504,0.12696831053604435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046427549886614766,0.0,0.050503217162275085,0.0,0.07107231824589719,0.0,0.0,0.08798890971304531,0.23574529595110766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388924524453422,0.08913741056125371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275048413500264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488370964769048,0.07243567355464538,0.2004839649725696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365701501026096,0.08906464679255748,0.0,0.07864146692193315,0.14924604317380966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927540450599787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444791621129134,0.0,0.0,0.13707413360127427,0.2574749815398455,0.0,0.08339244473939204,0.0,0.08526699624811263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3080340674175346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136655463431564,0.0877420590844373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081276354740207,0.24269418180439498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684115210124053,0.08788834726315613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429392720008136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681434869934105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361480407376196,0.0,0.0,0.07054775187254461,0.15545119446793518,0.10213560634998103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033253382220025,0.0,0.0868067997529292,0.092510114835667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482807704928868,0.07053576905633638,0.07128099917157825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293874809667963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vanillaclique,2020/02/29,"feeling lost, alone and invalidated I don't really know what to do anymore. I don't think I've ever truly been stable. Ever. My mind is always racing and the anxiety and depression that it brings along with it is really wearing on me as a person and it'd been hurting my life for what feels like eternity.

I'm 18M and I really don't know what to do anymore. My mood swings are getting really intense and I've started to cut myself more frequently again because I feel like that is the only sort of control I have in my life. My social anxiety is really kicking in again where I freeze and get a blank mind and feel stupid afterwards. It's stupid and I'm aware but my mind keeps pushing this agenda where I'm not worth it.

I went to see a counselor and I felt as though my issues were pushed aside and that I just needed to ""breath"" and all would be OK. I've heard this countless times and I find that it never works and I just work myself up. I was sent to my GP by someone else and he wants me to go to a psychiatrist but he doesn't think anything will come of it. What's the point in going then? I just feel really invalidated and I feel like my problems are just not worth anything. He talked about SSRI's, not really sure what they are or what they do but I told him I'd wait and think about taking meds.

I feel like I'm destined to have a short life. I don't know really what to do anymore and I constantly feel stupid, lonely and unhappy overall with what little potential I have fulfilled throughout my life.

Sorry. Sort of a rant I suppose.",1.8021518859338668,3.903308210031352,3.552379411467289,87.92198402265146,79.75235109717869,6.6239660228536765,21.57558903832541,7.717688229018142,0.9187080796844986,1225,36,254,20,31,409,150,319,0.136,0.7859999999999999,0.078,-0.9434,0,3,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,2,4,15,16,4,0,9,1,27,6,2,1,5,67,64,27,0,4,11,0,10,4,0,2,4,1,0,1,21,23,0,3,16,0,2,8,9,9,0,0,10,12,37,6,27,50,2,30,0,4,1,0,12,10,0,3,16,161,58,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108583021618212,0.0,0.0,0.07317835609176455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455733781354814,0.0,0.26165725477266194,0.0,0.0,0.14474460153691138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053611240324129575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575793903439887,0.0,0.09503869285693647,0.09863923919967596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574800820447201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346783784534643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591049033916313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3557462819569101,0.25131538028770944,0.08444222742906092,0.0,0.08038131312191542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918966103141842,0.0,0.09996380335616743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414831928171394,0.0,0.0,0.09179307456264887,0.0,0.07817070085629603,0.0,0.0,0.14499893817705747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484762538187041,0.1718644541408729,0.08814528398606923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600376132515206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768849888940068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664020378877649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521105751629834,0.06782959832294737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688711434590308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679130564340922,0.0,0.0,0.08313766805529213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415271934274518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4507251480426454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008180436915751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896501643544933,0.0745166036576344,0.0,0.0,0.09844866813233524,0.06224883466166824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288833478384622,0.0,0.06612466284366161,0.07068789421941997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905728896180028,0.08640678054144364,0.0,0.051282187249388766,0.0,0.0,0.08403644617294957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051872998737335294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152708923160318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12805188887824134,0.0,0.0,0.06247451904880812,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stanktrain666,2020/02/29,"I don’t understand what is wrong with my ex boyfriend My ex and I are super civil—even though he’s moving out next week, we still text and hang out because we still love each other and are super good friends. The reason we broke up, however, is so different than any breakup I’ve ever experienced. He’s been dealing with long episodes of emotional detachment. Moments where he’s supposed to be feeling joy or sadness are blank for him. He lost his sex drive, and cannot bring himself to be affectionate. At first, I took this personally, but he insisted that this is something he’s been dealing with for years, even before he met me. Anyone else experience something like this? And if so, how do you overcome it? How long?",3.945,6.12576821014493,4.45731884057971,83.58858695652177,73.42028985507247,7.498550724637681,29.61594202898551,8.344100000000001,2.2404811594202902,575,25,108,10,12,182,96,138,0.053,0.792,0.155,0.9125,2,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,3,1,0,4,10,12,0,0,1,0,13,2,0,3,1,23,20,13,0,1,3,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,7,14,0,0,3,0,0,5,2,4,0,1,5,2,13,8,13,13,1,20,0,3,0,2,22,5,0,2,11,67,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315176849269047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163446438410502,0.17048751795885694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101430572990949,0.0,0.1415867143388546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430841835573675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738434611798319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389985541092889,0.1871677815968993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21979972736109046,0.15051042858841715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16276258873667934,0.0,0.0,0.08413242493582185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415323281263854,0.0,0.0,0.1285534814200588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13956110177687273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129036912264556,0.0,0.0,0.2945020734832985,0.0,0.0,0.1816357252998247,0.0,0.150174616320035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17684758594352015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17695900189420868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528643778883796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107793661543766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561922555221373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657605641862599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634785766498512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18486682181682176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732191787846947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334690391573576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18192273174745094,0.0,0.10715052166895003
mentalhealth,ChocolateMouth,2020/02/29,"I have felt dissociated almost all the time for over a year now I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I can function, but I feel numb a lot of the time, and it’s like I’m light headed 24/7 or something. It’s not impacting my ability to function in everyday life, but I lack motivation. Sometimes I feel really down. I’ve tried looking into this online, and I’ve seen different dissociative disorders. I’m starting to wonder if it’s likely I have one, and if it is, is there any way for me to stop it. Does anyone have any idea what this might be?",2.0179646017699118,3.7994046460177024,4.271867256637169,84.56196017699116,77.76106194690266,7.705840707964603,23.689380530973448,8.548686976883017,1.5290502654867253,427,14,91,9,10,148,75,113,0.124,0.8170000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.7178,1,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,4,0,9,3,1,1,1,24,19,8,0,3,6,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,7,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,6,10,2,11,15,3,12,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,7,9,58,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20452414539992744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27779030587521164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14281444572223234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133949336314201,0.23408507567491124,0.0,0.17873816932445027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065471213422086,0.0,0.19610941707392696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20961663250877088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23057031573148365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224896242869964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426589271947948,0.19956980614710704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715162724791742,0.0,0.0,0.17364373175381928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21667408496590945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840324149404876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13084603629958033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15723953317829115,0.20200578047320816,0.0,0.14456727458174268,0.0,0.0,0.17075986994653158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238196460561212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867049457862488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16212198230147395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214974603216608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22331233515383853,0.0,0.13152855048407372
mentalhealth,elzrmrk,2020/02/29,Is mental illness a right? Any of you feel like you don't deserve depression or any mental illness? Not in the sense that you're too good to have depression but in the sense that i don't have the right to have depression. I hope this doesn't offend anyone. It's just that one of the things that's holding me back from getting myself checked is because i feel like i don't deserve or have the right to have depression because i've had a fairly good life compared to other people who has really gone through difficult stuff. While me on the other hand has gone through nothing compared to others. So i feel like i don't have the right to be declared mentally ill. I feel like it's offensive to other people who are really mentally ill if i am declared mentally ill as well. Really sorry if this offends anyone.,6.593263888888887,6.4218061875,6.978333333333335,76.69555555555556,65.25,10.111111111111112,34.02777777777778,9.725611199111238,3.2038194444444437,650,26,120,12,9,212,77,160,0.151,0.622,0.22699999999999998,0.9253,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,0,5,16,3,0,9,0,19,7,1,0,0,13,27,8,0,3,7,0,5,4,0,0,6,0,0,0,16,0,0,1,4,0,1,2,6,8,1,1,3,5,13,8,16,23,0,11,0,4,0,0,4,7,0,5,6,86,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643179233063028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15056375125780164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827877439571506,0.0,0.13126317686450434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3709268480998894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21775464830265465,0.30766360759450845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05625052199869545,0.0,0.0,0.1806085980365844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693564424006163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604697786891665,0.21039873452117494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5425050155451743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330747713223468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295659455246345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14928271793737816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20691887955924512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677813078865317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052215970941935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325067340282295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152784603592642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680377056694997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whatdoiknow1000,2020/02/29,"Idk whats wrong with me Im not sure if it is serious or not. Thats why i came to this subreddit to ask if i should get this checked out.

Some backstory: as a kid my mom used to yell and beat me, the beatings stopped but the yelling got worse and i was the scapegoat of the family. 
Since i moved out i stay in my room to avoid roomates becuase i fear they will hit me or yell at me. And they yell at their child too and due to that i just freeze. I cant move and i dont know why. Sometimes i also get reacuring bad dreams of her raking my phone away ( that sounds petty but at the time i was hiding the fact im gay and i was scared shittless when she took my phone. She would yell at me horribly over stuff on my phone that was harmless)


Another truamatic event was being in an abusive relationship. Ever since i have been jumpy with people and i worry anyone can beat me up. Ive also been constantly angry and have break downs.


Is this normal? Or should i get it checked out by a professional?


Again i am not looking for a diagnosis. I dont encourage that. I just would like to know if this is something i need to get checked out.",1.1788290098648169,3.1052518445378183,2.7742236024844718,93.60338509316773,80.97478991596638,6.324004384362441,21.69236390208257,7.423996415210882,0.5943582024113994,881,27,203,13,23,289,131,238,0.239,0.73,0.032,-0.9945,0,1,1,0,2,0,19.0,0,0,3,3,8,10,0,3,10,0,24,1,0,1,3,43,38,20,0,9,13,1,1,1,0,5,0,6,1,2,13,15,0,2,2,1,3,4,6,6,0,0,10,8,37,4,29,21,1,30,0,0,1,1,15,16,0,7,9,140,50,1,0.0,0.15294622768028382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20646063015023314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13535830320976538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026018398775286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12067832077892345,0.0,0.12128088403754213,0.0,0.1077817182631528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764040629888492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949649587795235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025765039582527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676600252458552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169113136907275,0.1452580426106495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697691800367553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324215397609576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788708392366161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14188497459079613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306507486039938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840003077121367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118438413364615,0.0,0.2743967426099945,0.0,0.09571589994101327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647722470597106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949222820669712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859044090918698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292379651827582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135631410826481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937698615183957,0.1276697103006225,0.0,0.0,0.1375888837677828,0.0,0.10792197666807407,0.0,0.0,0.1477729980160388,0.0,0.0,0.1216623661786951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527129432446339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434196951362367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148916848812973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329607227463072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310934640993924,0.13155002851295,0.1833984922769916,0.14113566982518785,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,insertkeyboardmash,2020/02/29,"Therapist banned the use of diagnostic and identity labels so I can sit with my raw self for the first time and now my brain is having a toddler's sh*tfit - send hELP (identity issues, anyone relate?) I'm 30F but I'm guessing the generalities apply to a wider demographic.

Without the life story I have issues with perfectionism and anxiety that stem from inconsistent parenting from a young age, causing trauma (says therapist). It took a series of depressions with escalating highly anxious periods to realise that I wasn't just ""an anxious person"" but something was wrong. I sought treatment, gave up after one SSRI and some CBT didn't work, and as I got ""promoted"" the issues unfortunately got more extreme until I quit work due to burnout and sheer terror.

I went up and down in some marked ways lasting months at a time that I believed were consistent with hypomania and depression, and could see the earlier pattern in teens and early twenties. This culminated in me thinking I was a man or bigender for a while, feeling my missing body over and inside me, being agitated over it, knowing my voice was wrong and this masculine-ness was mine, that I understood gender identities and was going to become an authority on it, that I was more non-binary than everyone else using the label, and other weirdness. I ended up seeing the psych and getting a ""mild bipolar"" diagnosis. Great, invalidating af to hear 'mild' but whatever, just help me. The antipsychotic was awful. Not great. I stopped.

I'm fortunate to have savings enough to afford private therapy so bit the bullet and went for it, and it is helping. I was hoping to get coping mechanisms for the anxiety and psychoeducation on bipolar but nooooooo

She's saying that we need to stop viewing things as belonging to X or Y diagnosis and see the things that happened, that I was in a crisis of sorts and deal with that. And that I'm reluctant to let go of diagnostic and identity labels because I'm using them to distance myself from myself, and that I need to learn to sit in myself, with the good and bad, and be okay. 

And she's right, she's really right. But what happens as soon as we remove all the narrative lenses? I'm left with *nothing*. I desperately head for other diagnoses until I can shut down the urge. I feel like no one (and I'm guessing that's why my brain adopted the masculine archetype that lives in my head (I write sometimes) because at least it was something solid). My body feels transparent and like a jumbled set of parts manufactured on different production lines that doesn't match my internal sense of what it should look and sound like (my internal voice even has a different accent to me, so I'm constantly surprised when I open my mouth). I hate my name, I struggle to say it, I hate hearing people using ""she"" and ""her"" in reference to me because it reminds me that I am an entity that people can interact with. Other people ""inconvenience"" me, and that's a distancing thing apparently? When we strip it back all that's left is a voice on an answering machine telling me to hurt myself or end it, I guess as a way to protect myself. And below that, is just a deep grief that makes me cry until I shut it down again. I did yoga/tai chi/qi gong and whenever I took the mindfulness stuff seriously I cried. I can't get further. Is there another layer?

It's my birthday soon, and in-laws have asked what I would like. And right now? There's nothing. I don't want anything. I don't know what I like? My hobbies are always fleeting when I'm feeling ""up""/""normal?"" and they vary then. Who am I? What am I? Honestly if someone claimed I was an alien or an accidentally sentient potato I'd agree.

I was so proud of myself for getting a new job outside my old career and now I see everyone's a functioning adult, even people younger than me. Fuck, I feel like a child? A nothing child? Sometimes I can switch on the adult and function on an even-keel with people I perceive as adults at work, and it flows easily, but holy shit dealing with uncertainty in tasks I collapse to feeling like a kid again, seeing my line manager as An Authority Figure and not a Reasonable Colleague Who I Report To. Colleagues have noticed me getting ""stressed"" (anxiety attacks). It's just one big ""not this again"", only this time it's not hidden by the patriarchal nature of my previous career where deference is sometimes expected.

So I guess ??? Can anyone relate to this approach in therapy or the yawning lack of identity, that nothingness? Or as I suspect, relate to that ""nothingness"" defence mechanism against What Lies Beneath?

Thank you to anyone who read this! <3",5.579529166356256,7.080489327944576,6.480975936824851,73.47529389853237,67.96073903002309,9.605572524770915,33.13633315950234,9.896295409449726,3.5078660359085148,3682,166,631,87,62,1220,394,866,0.154,0.7490000000000001,0.09699999999999999,-0.9962,7,0,2,0,0,2,131.0,3,1,2,8,26,37,6,3,49,2,47,14,8,7,2,126,109,74,1,10,22,1,6,7,0,2,5,9,0,9,60,54,0,5,17,1,0,10,14,20,0,4,24,22,92,17,97,79,11,92,0,5,7,1,41,41,2,15,43,447,152,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04652008227696541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058624598689193515,0.1283088079665159,0.12632065358104086,0.0,0.11727689262685062,0.0,0.04600766628454967,0.0,0.052266598785494715,0.06360362291728329,0.0,0.04298993738653442,0.04668099281221777,0.1022433179991596,0.06174618941533917,0.0,0.06298937063486032,0.0,0.0,0.061037249589726464,0.12420276290846048,0.0,0.12482403176361892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05743309876833672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06041687798583234,0.0,0.044638130334789805,0.0,0.12282501517562465,0.0,0.11527775188344215,0.09630726247989208,0.05674562316585027,0.0,0.11682429179132656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04670410820640037,0.0,0.09903610143533198,0.057768092414128475,0.0,0.11078047159762128,0.0,0.0,0.10684531872585612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16961312596590067,0.1198224392379472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04755546710450801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051686209079992884,0.14604857573697216,0.0,0.06354781120002019,0.04689312662681815,0.08942975349324385,0.12327792583246147,0.2463566420372485,0.0,0.09887883320553062,0.0,0.0,0.1103955008810749,0.11475583896858872,0.0,0.12602515834198208,0.0,0.11242221837843852,0.05907005895625277,0.0,0.05552943504111396,0.0,0.0,0.059850860187828675,0.0,0.0,0.17506083530034156,0.0554802392597764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061451344307422925,0.04557262651611179,0.0,0.0,0.12148879658066546,0.05716989924886968,0.03948959907292558,0.19119738000008335,0.0,0.04936794489707615,0.0,0.046948788150885726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037319142524107486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564513215070924,0.0,0.044625373776252274,0.0,0.0,0.08291041020987146,0.0,0.053996466083368826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093621209587294,0.06365183048500912,0.058666227375053386,0.0,0.11365448368910222,0.042520688203740366,0.0,0.0,0.06207941467521591,0.06054310787233054,0.0,0.19379845343838645,0.048816863994694516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0594652284994374,0.05592330691008719,0.0,0.03581621002962272,0.05748291782325201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432358339734728,0.0,0.13338127988764464,0.0,0.0,0.22275789451208397,0.0,0.058324422110326374,0.0,0.05738894064131925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047370817251021775,0.08608169272134944,0.16588385094205912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934834793563502,0.06404262827563392,0.058447365946838976,0.06400148716672346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488662112681822,0.051472738215596,0.12787174652178468,0.12982740608234478,0.11142872636086212,0.03582370258113673,0.0,0.0,0.09780152346655922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12423208435848312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314685854711414,0.0,0.0,0.032976091539795235,0.08875461775905535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365488107165892,0.050448434109661024,0.0,0.0,0.05389348789024888,0.0,0.12210545695095935,0.0,0.0,0.03971556511490796,0.12225363066807753,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,niggool,2020/02/29,"Having a hard time accepting I need help I have the appointment form ready but I’m hesitating getting help. I don’t know my diagnoses and I’m afraid to find out. Anxiety, and PTSD are sticking out to me. I don’t want my family to find out. I’m hitting a wall. I have a support to join me for the appointment. I’m scared.",-0.6445588235294117,1.551693073529414,2.3325882352941183,90.45064705882356,96.20588235294115,6.8376470588235305,21.50588235294117,7.908726449838941,1.4682835294117649,251,10,56,7,10,88,40,68,0.146,0.615,0.239,0.6757,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,5,0,6,1,0,0,0,12,16,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,9,2,8,15,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,32,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20508236972002145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720980824588965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527243111704543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4900450750323827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006203540222442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401492526848435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3593800818451789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473311245671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19877976815983836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31337408268896744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683973380839528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042168307193837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15632105474773422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812199733436266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SevereBonus,2020/02/29,"How to approach someone with psychosis? Hello everyone, I hope a professional can help me with a problem.

My sister has always been absent minded, living in her own world, and had trouble concentrating, but over the last few years things have started to escalate. Especially since she moved out. She doesn't have any friends and the only job she is able to hold (until getting fired) is as a cleaning lady, where she also doesn't interact with people much. I'm affraid that that social isolation has contributed to her state getting worse to the point of us realising that she might actually have a mental issue. 

First we thought she might have some form of Aspergers. We tried talking to her about it, but she doesn't take it seriously. She is weirdly aware that she has social issues and that the way she lives her life is not normal. She acknowledges that she needs people in her life, friends, or a boyfriend, but refuses to go to a psychologist. 

A weeks ago things took a more serious turn. She has been obsessed with a guy from a store she used to clean at a year ago. She imagines how he's crazy in love with her and from how she describes it I can tell that she's completelly delusional about the whole situation. I never said that to her, because I didn't want to descourage her from opening up to me, she has literalely no one else to talk to apart from me and my sister and mom. I just wanted to make sure to keep the line of communication open and that she feels she can always come to us, because in the past, when I used to push her to get help or I said anything she didn't like, she would just sever contact with us for a while. So, about a week ago she calls me at 3 am and asks us to pick her up at the school where she cleans. She says she's affraid to go home because she thinks that that guy from her work has planted cameras in her apartment or has paid someone to do it. She also received a notification on her phone that her data is not secure and she fears that that guy somehow found a loop hole in her contract so that he can spy on her legaly. She wanted me to check her apartment for cameras. We went, and I checked everywhere to assure nothing was there and confirmend that the notification she got was just google checking if she wanted to secure her data on google drive. She seamed to calm down but we realised that this wasn't Asperger, but some form of phychosis. We decided to wait and see if this was just an overthinking episode or a serious issue. Two hours ago she called to say that she's in a dressing cabin in some store, because that's the only place she's safe. Now she's convinced that that guy has installed something in her shower that controlls her mind and forces her to think about him. She insisted we buy the ""safety device"" that that dressing cabin has so we can install it her her apartment. We offered to pick her up and get her to my moms, where she's safe, but she got a little paniky, so we said we ordered it online. That calmed her down. She promissed to come over later. 

I know she needs urgent help, but I don't know how to approach her about it. I'm affraid that when she sees we don't believe her, she'll stop calling us when she has these panic/psychosis attacks. She doesn't give any indication that she might be a danger to herself or others, but we are nevertheless very scarred for her safety. She wanders the city during the night, sometimes with her phone of. She is very attractive and gets often approached by guys, I'm affraid someone might grab her. And that these psychosis attacks might get worse and worse until she can't tell the diference between reality and fantasy enough to call us. I would appreciate any advice on how to procide. I apologise for possible mistakes, I'm not a natice english speaker and I'm writing from my phone.",6.4314649282266645,6.4952815660377405,6.343001943208176,80.32088792076728,65.54986522911051,9.004751457406131,32.61969535510562,8.569652575389874,2.4418162978750058,3030,114,585,39,43,956,311,742,0.09300000000000001,0.8220000000000001,0.085,-0.3675,2,1,1,0,0,0,68.0,18,0,0,3,31,27,3,2,35,0,53,3,0,11,3,121,103,52,0,14,22,4,3,1,2,8,2,6,5,5,42,43,0,10,10,1,7,13,15,12,0,3,19,11,122,15,92,75,11,77,0,0,2,1,145,37,0,18,25,422,164,5,0.055844675617055584,0.0,0.05449634771094152,0.0,0.0,0.05457077069099955,0.19801174183841305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931793382966753,0.09293448747416068,0.0,0.0,0.113928883245368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045955409758098975,0.0,0.052207233224872064,0.12706276102706598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361695836984714,0.0,0.0,0.06291782591245829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280946304562283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621048643716262,0.0,0.0,0.06263455227367885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04665106064578842,0.0,0.0,0.05770247813518256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05336198072309445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06284078581318021,0.028236745936740488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04750145255160172,0.0,0.06123080437479344,0.08629091570605946,0.0,0.17505922863555226,0.05357130147385875,0.0634756321884546,0.0,0.08932817719832822,0.0,0.0,0.2764750437413918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229452673261577,0.0,0.056016762940439606,0.055466363478799297,0.054995756429535816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17486199732595326,0.05541722357511989,0.04963731359629011,0.0,0.0,0.06138154650939138,0.045520864117466364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888949182318229,0.02728288768297077,0.055971035890976926,0.09862374338349217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05040200006609839,0.0,0.03727675461539752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056278298214109033,0.2962118788439313,0.11277440569141915,0.1308092182834287,0.0,0.05935405234809636,0.04105226214926667,0.08281623872946266,0.04307085655092161,0.0,0.0,0.052406445044532055,0.05471592515739087,0.05358447239379509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03784179746968151,0.08494478452846309,0.0,0.06552169442907918,0.0,0.0,0.05331006183323808,0.07743133314490905,0.0,0.05834580008650704,0.0,0.05279126905246916,0.06295648094153232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05343581257734107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936322444157713,0.08881985498367315,0.0,0.05651779312940033,0.08900195246453507,0.0,0.0,0.06308858789233003,0.0,0.04619529275338302,0.06277175519375723,0.0,0.113853228211514,0.14195103728252734,0.04299195961400958,0.05523181212992605,0.0,0.03952714883271991,0.0,0.0,0.04668864937490397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05263294587448588,0.0,0.04198824610839375,0.08977166980454747,0.0976214158860428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420144209685273,0.07156602645247694,0.0,0.044334434529143485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204548940264393,0.03791486900319838,0.06074297086906692,0.054552133529126086,0.0,0.4030456127626005,0.09646373903345544,0.0,0.09215541182325772,0.13175454625837296,0.04432690414913055,0.08959046056219228,0.0,0.0,0.051768573780874266,0.0,0.06234858599810246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04065558895609301,0.0,0.17073148619367334,0.07934091059267565,0.0,0.0,0.07192428031554618
mentalhealth,a-j-e-c,2020/02/29,"I feel trapped and alone. I want out. I have a problem. I know that I have a problem because I have barely been able to make it out of my room to get food from the kitchen for the past month, I have not had a good night sleeping since November and I am beginning to hate even my hobbies.

I am currently at a very good university in my country and I am on a very competetive course that I had specifically been working towards since I was maybe 15 or 16. The first term went really well, aside from the occasional off day that I locked myself in my room to just sleep or even catch up on work I wanted to focus on.

This term has been a struggle to even get out of bed at all, much less attend class or do any work. When I sat down to study for midterms exams, I just couldn't. I could flip through as many textbooks and lecture notes as I wanted and I wouldn't read a single word. I could stare as much as I wanted at practice questions and I wouldn't even think about them. This resulted in what I can only describe as a complete mental breakdown. When my mother called at the weekend, she told me that I was too stressed and I should take a walk somewhere. I ended up walking about 5 miles from campus to the centre of the nearby city. I did feel less stress, but I still couldn't do any work. My grades reflected that. Out of the six tests I had, I only got passing scores in two and when I say passing, I mean just barely. If I want to even pass the year, I will need to get at least 90% in the rest of my exams for some of the courses.

It was around December (before I started failing) that I was beginning to have second thoughts about my course. It wasn't really what I expected it to be and in hindsight now I realise that the only thing that truly interested me was the projected graduate salary (the average starting salary is US$70,000, which is even more to us here than it would be in the US) and my main interests had always been in a different area entirely. My plan was to keep working hard enough to get a final grade high enough to transfer to a different university (I would need to as my current college specializes in only courses similar to the one I am studying). As things stand now, this is no longer an option. My only other option would be to drop out entirely and redo my high school qualifications to get the requirements for the major I want to change to.

I broke down again two weeks ago and my parents were worried enough to come to personally pick me up and take me home for the weekend. They said it was so that we could talk seriously about university and my future but when I came home we didn't do anything like that. We went to the movies together and it was fun but when I tried to properly talk about how I was feeling, my father accused me of copying my brother and my mother was already saying how relieved she was that I wasn't planning on leaving university. They didn't listen to me at all.

My brother is 6 years older than me and went to university but he was diagnosed with depression and anxiety in his 2nd year and had to take a year long then he decided to quit (without telling them initially so that he could keep his allowance and the money intended for rent) the year after. I thought that because of his experiences and the fact that my mother is a family doctor would make  them more understanding but apparently, I'm not allowed to even think that I have a mental illness because my brother already has one. 

Also, my brother is currently living at home rent-free. He has a part-time job but he only works just enough to spend money on his hobbies and keeps refusing my parents' attempts to send him back to university. At the same time, my parents are constantly telling me that I need to do well at university otherwise they will stop paying my fees and when I tried to explain that I wanted to change courses, they said that they did not want to fund a ""second attempt"" at university.

I went to my university tutor about changing courses and she did not give any help other than information I am already aware of. She made me feel so uncomfortable that I couldn't bring myself to tell her that I had not found partners for a project that requires us to work in groups that should have been made over a week ago. 

I think I will try to book an appointment at the university clinic on Monday but I do not really know what I should say.",6.261716589861753,6.041576300691244,6.653133640552998,78.91398617511523,65.94700460829493,9.758525345622123,32.80645161290323,9.344382777155033,2.7453654377880183,3471,131,688,58,49,1128,344,868,0.077,0.888,0.036000000000000004,-0.9834,15,2,0,0,0,0,65.0,6,0,8,16,39,20,1,3,46,0,81,8,2,11,3,133,142,55,0,31,22,11,5,1,1,12,4,6,8,2,40,36,2,7,19,4,7,15,17,10,2,8,46,12,120,10,124,74,21,112,0,3,1,0,63,48,0,8,48,512,160,32,0.05045368576812512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944829646448177,0.0,0.0,0.0522548024202832,0.16703069056650066,0.040347794280355065,0.041981508319577615,0.0,0.0,0.1029307093587928,0.0,0.03859693151480493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04151908445453346,0.04491447713618605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038795770035526346,0.0,0.0922682956502057,0.0,0.04293237049912749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05151885422949985,0.057705575503482674,0.0,0.0,0.16011992886805348,0.04346138281459145,0.05289972960633738,0.05452251031509954,0.0,0.161132650528288,0.0,0.0,0.03253845339115795,0.0,0.043455685621576194,0.05120942901290498,0.0,0.1054267262161486,0.0,0.05164148528939636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04468699014322912,0.20852857807525466,0.0,0.23326928526862376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04935338598448306,0.047563244679145085,0.0,0.10204359795200138,0.0,0.0,0.05526954660230399,0.0,0.04291587934008991,0.06100879710111575,0.055319862262963086,0.0,0.0,0.13179984207379858,0.04839977277844697,0.0,0.08463631572679113,0.040352421540679376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04519659233439991,0.04981256923719595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03381804205232272,0.10661417822718568,0.15182748170255256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05006749799343635,0.13453666235261855,0.0,0.0,0.055456052440575984,0.0,0.0,0.05342316829131999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024649122352198845,0.0,0.044551528887627916,0.04464992421989036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954809947857724,0.06735645405902843,0.051152118349764124,0.05068750879036727,0.05495885480630439,0.0,0.0,0.10169089684146344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040271650623877685,0.0,0.0741785286301213,0.1122323061022012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047347366266978566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837744645626465,0.2302338093408809,0.0,0.0,0.1680685417630408,0.05463642501109369,0.04816375201921763,0.0,0.044054212323345936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655472672199376,0.0,0.0,0.05651967492872869,0.053663705281339034,0.05046733925203335,0.0,0.09696576913056323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598601788654536,0.12036838795643533,0.0,0.0510618235910708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347162048279158,0.0,0.10098024563317994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142275694074893,0.0,0.040292378628107535,0.04218154046865205,0.11558905316435415,0.05274514703447936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138046779768884,0.08110552293753898,0.13229623559268025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670383738777231,0.0969860538290198,0.0,0.08010918153700465,0.02941994990918685,0.0,0.0,0.04821065889664684,0.0,0.10276422230892666,0.0,0.09857183957636706,0.052524066229414,0.2427582871223043,0.0,0.0,0.0832591493922614,0.23807112860770685,0.0,0.08094180680755796,0.0,0.09072784549923386,0.18708428872359847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04863555263649735,0.0,0.2571161889778469,0.05123816697771929,0.0,0.1433634031308508,0.0,0.0,0.16245259722803476
mentalhealth,strawberry_meth,2020/02/29,"I am secretly ""s""-idal Im a first timer here so I censored it hoping that no one will get triggered (sorry)

I am a 21-year old male in the Philippines

I think everything is bubbling up lately. I contemplate about that thing too much recently and it has a lot of factors. I have one person that motivates me to keep living.

 My partner is always there for me and somehow everything feels better. However, he doesn't know it but he is now a trigger to my episodes (sorry for not being too politically correct). We already talked about this but somehow he manages to forget. One time after being intimate, he made a comment on my body, and now I don't want to have sex with him but he would never notice (I always initiate). I feel disgusted by my own body and I have no energy or time to work on it because I have too much work.

I hate my mother. Everytime she calls or chats I want to throw the phone. I was forced to answer her call one day which resulted to an episode.

I have literally a zero percent social battery right now and I just want to be alone but ilthis is impossible to be done without negative imoacts on my studies and my work. For context, I am a really extroverted person on a usual day but I became repulsed to the idea of someone to talk to recently. For the past month, engaging in a conversation makes me want to do it.

I never told anyone about this. At this point I just want to do it but caskets and embalming bodies are to expensive for the family.

I feel like once I hve the opportunity to do it, I would. Everyday I want to kill myself but I can't do it because of practical reasons. I started this post to ask for advice but looking at it now, it felt more of a rant. I can't afford anything and I have no outlet for my thoughts.

Tldr: I have many reasons to kill myself, I can't because it is impractical, no one knows I really want to die.

How can you make someone that triggers your ""episodes"" not a trigger anymore?",2.6708194905869327,4.70849270801034,4.638564784053155,81.5003720930233,76.70025839793281,7.523632336655593,28.111406423034328,8.418075326091056,2.2268550609080844,1526,66,291,30,35,522,193,387,0.166,0.782,0.052000000000000005,-0.992,2,1,0,0,0,3,44.0,1,2,0,7,18,9,4,0,18,0,36,4,3,12,3,66,62,20,5,10,15,1,4,1,1,3,0,0,0,4,21,10,0,1,14,1,1,1,15,4,0,7,6,5,50,5,48,49,6,34,0,0,1,1,28,11,0,6,22,227,71,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305930539064703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803255204595496,0.09379768161340464,0.0,0.14145070481316646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429542350076688,0.05943275215207476,0.0,0.06994631677576456,0.0,0.07946188908672633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15544243137096664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517404411262857,0.0,0.2832416801503082,0.0,0.0,0.17358543162516976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963367801540597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882147631822004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698271969881728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527818913339448,0.0,0.08012878470029508,0.0,0.12893300612948785,0.06072276621571665,0.0816116487425343,0.0,0.0,0.07229946735264899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0444080770364051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391817384834392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442244015905133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959526773303272,0.09181269491451388,0.0,0.0,0.07555034932731054,0.18807593841465914,0.0,0.09342562973395234,0.0,0.0958817273667139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04152585113430225,0.0,0.0750550112883905,0.0,0.0713771219763632,0.0,0.0,0.07226247190818688,0.0,0.0804273985697381,0.11347398273351385,0.08617488369142806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784479158506812,0.0,0.1249669863795865,0.0,0.1311117795259498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677107008483196,0.08919136429644446,0.0905203613608808,0.2879850671674396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114044661882516,0.0,0.1484343853415142,0.0,0.0,0.08035081936110612,0.0,0.08140482705245536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890410989094694,0.17478471324291744,0.16785103365008114,0.0,0.0,0.07258804039877935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664501098287458,0.144037481443806,0.0,0.0,0.190297162152342,0.0601621982710962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366367460695223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056469059915305514,0.054463446011875694,0.0,0.06747911547243582,0.09912632529884301,0.0,0.0,0.0812194696356072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361356303743654,0.0,0.3509391872698838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193527906430904,0.0,0.18563921323715288,0.0,0.0,0.1207606350330685,0.0,0.0,0.05473608571114381
mentalhealth,HyHoang,2020/02/29,"I just can’t do anything perfectly So, I am currently struggling with anxiety and low self-esteem, believing that I am just stupid and can’t do anything to the point of “perfectly acceptable”. I need some advice here, really appreciate any insights put in.

So long story short, I work for my dad in my free time, and I just can’t do things that I am supposed to be done. I worked hard, I don’t complain about the workload, trying the best that I can, and yet I am constantly criticized because I just can’t do the job to fit my dad’s sense of completeness. I usually mess things up or never do anything without something not being done correctly. He will say that I am so slow and stupid and all, and my ego tends to fight back by creating a defense mechanism, saying that I am still be able to fix it and I will be good. But I still can not do things properly. I will always-do-things-wrong. And I hate myself for that.

Even, my dad has high expectations on me since I was really young. And now he said that he is disappointed in me. I feel like I failed him and I don’t deserve what he has done for me, just because of my stupidity. He once said that “oh you will become a professor, or a doctor, or something big”, and that even makes me feel worse for failing him (I am Asian so you know it). I don’t want to live my life following other’s expectation, but I also feel bad that I don’t accomplish enough for him to recognize me.

I know this is all trivial comparing to all other problems people have to face in this sub, and it may just sounds like a typical rant, I just want some advice anyway. Is there anyway that I can improve my own skill at doing things? I just don’t know why I can’t do anything correctly? Or is it just my dad criticizing me leading to this, since this self-hate only emerges recently when I started to work with him more and he began to go stricter on me. Maybe he was just teaching me the hard way. And I am just incompetent?",4.050013060919863,4.817724382871539,5.303134620766862,83.23063998507324,70.91435768261965,9.004907174176697,28.30571881705383,9.250403328903447,2.2063559847000653,1528,54,322,31,27,510,179,397,0.134,0.7759999999999999,0.09,-0.9334,2,0,2,0,1,0,46.0,0,2,0,11,29,23,6,1,9,0,50,3,1,2,8,65,68,27,0,6,20,4,5,2,0,5,2,5,0,0,26,17,0,1,8,0,1,4,14,15,0,0,8,10,58,9,33,51,9,36,0,4,0,0,23,14,0,7,19,237,84,11,0.09761479287602168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19077609169458215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806251459570124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638140650957322,0.0,0.0746750493667191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213146288703294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505975032008848,0.08150427467885575,0.11901014341894404,0.10780786952678707,0.0,0.10997844426154137,0.10244070276925027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023472531313556,0.1054869128084906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991287680154494,0.0,0.2996814727331138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086217511985604,0.0,0.1289473001351495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14807091682340928,0.06973602753498775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05547673632522771,0.08187465696192786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174887361835186,0.0963743987120817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031353880975416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686761971981764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093961195185594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894821502072296,0.09537931417116442,0.0,0.08619565049543658,0.08638601993688648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515863223603355,0.0,0.09806717976388377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723801320450207,0.07528654602708444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395656861076227,0.0,0.07424044867324636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767380653157648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227753115724543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340417361661604,0.0,0.0981298282271064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12506907177200932,0.0,0.0963828316287128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857080431754831,0.15525440253182493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20366703592993807,0.0,0.0,0.16149593078096294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029727316650865,0.0,0.0,0.06909225281822977,0.0,0.1559105993699186,0.0,0.0,0.10204817595781644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25940372368012304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05691997072337825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627403675952882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750890343887703,0.0,0.11515146790070477,0.07748207899037635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808216756083644,0.0,0.0,0.09409717694047784,0.0,0.2131941954009476,0.0,0.09947781340572913,0.0,0.10672645218302272,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,musicnerd201,2020/02/29,"I need advice Hi everyone,

So I’m a highschool senior rn and I just had one of my worst mental breakdowns, it was absolutely awful. Basically I’m taking a lot of hard AP classes and they consume my time to no end. I don’t have weekends anymore bc my weekends are spend slaving away to school work, same thing with breaks. Dropping out of some of thee classes is not an option due to how late it is in the year, and of course also bc my parents would hate me. 

When I have mental breakdowns, all I want is for my parents to support me, and be there for me. But instead, all they do is yell and compare me to others, saying “xyz has more work than you and they don’t complain” and then they yell at me for being useless and worthless etc. the fact that college is gonna be just like this has made life seem so bleak at this point. I have NO support system bc my friends, parents, and others just do NOT care. I don’t know what to do anymore and everything seems so worthless at this point. 

Also, therapists and potential medication is NOT an option as my parents won’t let me get help. (And I’m still a minor so I can’t do anything abt it)",2.9927801621363836,4.322529253218889,4.24631616595136,87.67407129232237,74.06437768240345,6.379494515975202,27.536719122556033,6.691623216298621,1.1809420123986647,888,34,184,7,18,292,129,233,0.129,0.809,0.062,-0.9465,4,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,4,2,14,11,1,0,7,1,28,2,0,2,3,37,44,23,0,3,7,4,1,1,1,3,2,3,0,0,11,14,0,0,3,2,1,0,10,6,0,1,3,4,27,5,23,34,8,22,0,3,0,0,15,8,0,6,12,138,38,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184160646175783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19381581183398827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24035674917543826,0.0,0.0,0.09972112730927347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385295580361025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235514734196063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732984822970064,0.0,0.13514815602497626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157930459367712,0.10890911157700024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362366080569252,0.0,0.06331174689160708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855381801734074,0.11964053696665825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122465418386192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659756757825845,0.0,0.13669674662100334,0.0,0.0,0.12391514853187413,0.08559328595777578,0.05920261249588046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103023225425015,0.0,0.11466380535287113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207648379093355,0.2442426417477157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898537161249061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821149615018024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5382258839928447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291092556767644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636750181361534,0.0,0.12264101383412962,0.0,0.22063613304300067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677480781559564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750281178102401,0.0,0.0,0.09111256449911907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069976088439376,0.08050685972360293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066125394790902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147532766091408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644151944089873,0.0,0.0,0.08608306495027522,0.0,0.0,0.07803619151399717
mentalhealth,LuigiOJE,2020/02/29,"I dont understand how I'm feeling or why So 6 weeks ago I left military training (marines) I trained for years to get into it and no matter what set back or health issue I had (suffered with sever acne and went through 9 months of accutane to be cleared to join). I gave up every chance I had as I always wanted that dream of becoming the elite. I persevered my rubbish bar work job and worked and trained tirelessly to get into the marines. Anyway over Christmas my head went when I was home and I went back into recruit training and I crumbled, I left within two weeks. Since coming back I have distanced myself from everyone and everything and it's the lowest I've really felt in my life. These last few weeks I've turned to binging on alcohol and drugs and last week I was very lucky to not land myself in a police cell. I have since returned to the bar work job and it's killing me to continue with what feels like im right back to square one. I have no idea how I could go from wanting a dream for years, to being in the process of fulfilling that dream to then crumbling and being at the lowest I've ever been. I have no idea what other things I can do and the thought of continuing to work in the pub is killing me mentally and physically. The constant questions from customers about what went wrong and I don't even know myself. Has anyone ever experienced anything similar? These last 6 weeks have been the lowest of my life and I look back and think could I have went from having everything I ever wanted to being this broken man. I can't understand how it all went wrong. And I can't figure a way to make myself happy. I have tried to draw strength from the experience and use the bar job as motivation to move on and do greater things, but I really am at breaking point.",4.43738764044944,5.5252265252809,5.111352808988767,83.77971460674159,70.26404494382022,8.16791011235955,28.28494382022472,8.488131031819089,1.933062831460674,1417,50,282,22,25,457,176,356,0.066,0.87,0.064,-0.5881,6,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,7,16,9,2,0,15,0,30,9,1,6,5,60,57,31,2,5,4,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,1,1,16,26,4,0,13,7,0,9,8,5,0,2,15,6,37,4,48,36,3,57,0,1,2,0,4,19,0,4,27,194,53,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725317292599396,0.0810807456223529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312897506844578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05304927584225382,0.0,0.062433613090853074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916923780691999,0.0,0.0,0.08379120288234257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06535431102800658,0.0,0.08198729231331311,0.0,0.12115023357997375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891774707685134,0.0,0.08798379894363033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050110671114180536,0.2058832013160267,0.06392279264108383,0.072495953703037,0.13637209120548435,0.07421431001574742,0.0,0.0,0.07672315751459419,0.054200733740878776,0.07284601014278777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792767032662502,0.0,0.043118025512250496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08076381969252497,0.0,0.0,0.0778633457060083,0.0806450578280175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610265956575632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17129343209530665,0.08195139551804707,0.07918738579279985,0.22586443120433145,0.0,0.16787532084532106,0.0,0.04169554515842568,0.1855297580522818,0.0,0.0,0.16486349195976965,0.0,0.10717684893571333,0.03706569612948786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371074021377124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064305785088215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645797338347307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605578058045703,0.08063659880700362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05141070777783988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172060229570952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499049444082175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720707786133184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06479159787368323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571022449046592,0.0,0.12551902157177985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080780806968652,0.04861370652011495,0.0,0.06023140575972099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051509980526697134,0.08252354099747587,0.07411285887702856,0.15796433240316848,0.0,0.0655263416408814,0.0,0.06259976090178927,0.13424827034546996,0.060221175215925835,0.3042871438212711,0.0,0.0,0.4219871988147086,0.0684598518160374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22093375506618226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659013919305451,0.0,0.09771412577313568
mentalhealth,Mechatomsk,2020/02/29,"Losing my mind again Hey, long time lurker, but my first post.

A little background I suppose.....

I am 36 M diagnosed with agoraphobia, panic disorder and depression. Ive got major insecurity issues, abandonment issues and am generally just a ball of mental health problems. Abused as a child by "" family"" and been in and out of therapy my whole life.

Well about a few years ago i met my now current girlfriend, who I live with. Ive been working full time for a year now. I thought it would get easier, that i was over my mental health isssues, like they wouldn't continue to ruin my life. I was wrong.

The panic attacks have steadily gotten worse, especially over the last three months. I'm missing time at work, and i feel like my gf hates me. 

I have been on various pills and as mentioned had a ton of therapy. Nothing ever works. I always fall back to thinking I can just push myself and it will be fine, but nothing ever changes. Nothing works. I am never happy, never content, never feeling like things will improve. 

Im not even sure why im writing this post,  just feeling incredibly alone and hopeless. I dont think it ever does get any better. 

Tldr my life is shite and so am I, im tired of always hurting and being afraid.",2.6456012658227834,5.094562215189875,4.1937394514767945,82.58402689873421,78.74683544303798,6.481645569620253,25.486814345991558,7.645422480735847,1.6110789029535866,963,37,175,15,24,320,148,237,0.264,0.621,0.115,-0.9934,1,1,0,0,1,1,39.0,0,0,1,7,15,23,2,4,8,0,23,8,0,0,7,39,37,15,0,3,6,0,3,3,2,4,8,0,0,1,7,13,0,1,6,1,0,2,6,15,1,2,10,3,27,8,19,21,6,34,0,7,0,0,9,8,0,0,25,118,34,4,0.0,0.10676513480397104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987671873570623,0.0,0.0,0.0933263644025296,0.0,0.0,0.14995680251887916,0.0,0.0,0.061277614336558685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251267253255676,0.0,0.0692887161354355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969461376974106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095324003010338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761126181402958,0.09145934175513702,0.0,0.0,0.10327340217260876,0.0,0.07885551349661793,0.0,0.10560777380252276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951653740782551,0.2445278616374514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494730626652543,0.0,0.13668635560255876,0.1287486248136772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664717515788698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415708811330736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720688744919671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09592333906238172,0.0,0.08896456924794148,0.0,0.19156457074945105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646418474000956,0.0,0.2920014752462439,0.1881020111674932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345134638903092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909412146287384,0.13206898897110286,0.09031348645694057,0.07956842294063836,0.07974415566201343,0.0,0.10080958724684484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816185547639284,0.0,0.0909850032161316,0.0,0.07192461873621986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208494223371748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593877589437009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114483881978821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17260016612165074,0.0,0.0,0.0862227124922178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492722653343943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20609634917182987,0.0,0.05986481069381009,0.11547717954304974,0.0,0.0715369527950688,0.1576308878088794,0.10356772336777774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101934729764898,0.0,0.08130989350071513,0.10060414440277993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624034323564821,0.0,0.09182937520375248,0.06401127065300663,0.09852069608433617,0.0,0.11605524916236992
mentalhealth,benl92,2020/02/29,"I’m having a breakdown Title says it all really. I’m up to my eyes in debt and just gambled away the last of the little money I had to pay my bills, I got paid yesterday and don’t get paid again for another month. 

I feel like I’ve really hit my limit with it all, job, social life, everything. Not interested in talking to family about this which is why I’ve came here. 

I just don’t know what to do I’m sat contemplating ending my life as I know I’ll be less of a burden on everyone that way, after all I’ve contributed nothing. I’ve sat and wrote a suicide letter out, not sure I’ve got the balls to go through with it - we may find out yet. 

Just wanted to tell someone that isn’t involved in my life.",4.083325974981605,3.8134521523178826,5.87916114790287,82.79495952906551,70.52317880794702,9.360117733627668,26.71155261221487,9.150863307647796,1.836469610007359,549,15,123,10,9,191,92,151,0.10800000000000001,0.875,0.018000000000000002,-0.8943,2,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,1,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,6,0,9,4,1,0,4,26,27,4,1,1,5,0,1,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,8,9,0,1,4,1,7,2,5,1,0,0,9,3,11,3,23,15,4,19,0,0,1,0,8,9,0,1,8,72,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18861567922011016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689994317061303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20573023489546946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15931675403502746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718792351126263,0.16166095850757828,0.0,0.16957109282517502,0.0,0.09095071487059808,0.12850345684237952,0.0,0.0,0.16440341358926386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397779064656203,0.0,0.10222768121611532,0.0,0.28772655292776483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849918370879864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19771030087528732,0.14662295514809734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3811552343799332,0.08787833215837147,0.18028301624191645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435753143468539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17259588201479809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304663548365637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14304462213113706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833609389580724,0.15240835879120795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19675515889837888,0.0,0.16953100983216815,0.0,0.0,0.1445775225329201,0.15721956030993828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609553059421674,0.14277720348498796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16231012028980746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,insomnibun,2020/02/29,"What counts as a hyperfixation/special interest? (16 F) Hello, for a while, I've been questioning if I have ADHD or Autism. One of my things, my whole life, has been fixations on topics. Like, I couldn't stop thinking of them. I needed to learn more, i needed to do it, yknow? First I remember my first interest being My Little Pony. I have from all generations, I constantly kept myself updated, and would panic if I couldn't check up on pony news. This lasted for years. Next was Steven Universe. Same deal. Then it was history (specifically WW2). Learning about it more and more made me purely happy. Lastly, The latest one is romance. That one really kinda lost itself a week ago, and i've been feeling really down about it since it was my little escape. Like them all, I couldn't stop thinking of the soft warmth of romance. Would these count as fixations? I'm planning to get tested for Autism soon.",2.935692810457514,5.588862582352941,4.058039215686275,82.79006535947714,79.05882352941177,7.071895424836601,21.79738562091504,8.167268648758528,1.4376993464052283,709,21,128,14,18,230,106,170,0.04,0.775,0.185,0.9733,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,2,4,3,9,0,1,5,0,17,1,0,1,3,30,27,10,0,9,3,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,11,3,0,3,7,0,1,0,3,2,0,5,9,2,18,7,19,12,7,22,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,5,18,91,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18513580733424628,0.0,0.1365542922355155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16647120406453786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881676443451598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789131736586047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620663673020444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048374250832999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639870024940766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511394253208397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880868599726956,0.1505201816053676,0.3087932107791106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816163251088032,0.0,0.0,0.14576397964260146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284493386162497,0.0,0.0,0.16383183757988834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31316081495463866,0.0,0.0,0.18074218277693896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17256905972130238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973742373797545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17450639881339294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743013011215096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575821175705789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234267235181364,0.19741552697013512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356804520317305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17198913466058702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21886261472605947,0.0,0.0,0.09920188673511182
mentalhealth,9767078874,2020/02/29,"The Ultimate Power to Transform your Life  

In the city there was a person living in a small apartment. He was all alone managing his daily chores doing a lot of work with daily stress and added pinch of troubles in his life. The person was having everything he needed. A luxury car, great financial status and obviously high paid job. But managing all these daily stress being in a frustrated state of mind he was sick of living such life.

So he decided to take a long vacation alone [Read more](https://mentalhealth001.blogspot.com/2020/02/Mentalhealth.html)",7.577983870967742,10.610739204301076,6.326545698924733,70.40981854838712,65.55913978494624,9.811290322580646,26.678763440860216,10.125756701596842,3.2324634408602138,458,14,65,12,8,137,61,93,0.19,0.769,0.04,-0.9217,2,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,2,3,5,1,2,9,0,7,4,0,0,3,11,10,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,2,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,4,0,0,5,0,3,1,11,4,3,10,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,1,1,40,4,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3814176705974684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16548910530177682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203010027798433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19454925494222214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18272606126903448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3901810263958523,0.0,0.0,0.3251900224060357,0.16295411425853565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654540886448207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859243537888178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653413267481654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32156001489070085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841853196950469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4218531633697445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844697254783134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340528297750193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hysai7,2020/02/29,"Help, dreams I scream very loudly when sleep sometimes, I wake everyone up and I dont remember anything from that dream. Its very scary for other people, and very unpleasant feeling for me. Sister says Im screaming, sometimes fighting lol and demolish whole room, and s I always running away from someone and pray for life in that dreams",4.6553005464480846,7.507323737704923,4.237295081967215,82.79124316939892,73.91803278688525,6.689617486338799,29.83879781420765,7.793537801064563,2.286506010928962,272,12,44,4,6,82,45,61,0.19899999999999998,0.57,0.23,0.0753,0,0,0,0,2,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,7,2,6,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,4,5,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,5,5,0,8,2,1,6,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17615733071521072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17421696799395994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989058617010916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24811923465073926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20229528006963896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704550974540572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190285810130834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286800802197956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14953503999164053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467711000646543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23982296161551575,0.0,0.0,0.16835804439967694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21186006932261486,0.0,0.17937880399815992,0.0,0.41876762264716577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5240417782126255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23636350254467645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Smartartis8,2020/02/29,"Does anyone know anything about DID? If anyone has info, please comment I need to know some things about it",3.823,6.5238273000000016,3.0599999999999987,90.935,76.0,4.0,20.0,3.1291,-0.3584999999999998,86,2,15,0,2,25,17,20,0.0,0.887,0.113,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,5,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5361656226088097,0.0,0.31550625812607297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335516695650642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4214141960459088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28428689604931073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4208590354618579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547145098560526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lava_advancer,2020/02/29,"A problem that accrued and advice I find myself struggling to maintain a healthy lifestyle and partly because of behaviour that came to light but also my life in general. I find it hard to keep a healthy relationship with my family and friends, I see my friends leaving me by the number, and I feel like a failure all throughout my life. Though I have not experienced much, I feel that I can no longer go on with living but I want to help myself first before I go through with my decision. Any advice on how to live healthily and normally?",5.590249653259363,6.735360757281555,5.958280166435507,78.55242718446603,67.64077669902913,8.604160887656034,35.10263522884882,8.841846274778883,3.1000829403606103,430,21,77,7,7,138,66,103,0.11199999999999999,0.6809999999999999,0.207,0.8957,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,5,0,2,2,0,1,1,24,10,10,0,3,3,0,3,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,5,0,0,3,2,2,0,1,1,6,17,3,14,9,3,7,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,2,58,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3362118762877224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13757250327769335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698644748908785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048680242391464,0.0,0.14638504499578278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967567401561608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621747793461248,0.0,0.1739672944222689,0.12289842219813304,0.0,0.0,0.31446500554285783,0.1463288156511255,0.0,0.0,0.2658202395600851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955374747909646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410528525699832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530822896441607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290836217604728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18215516178639807,0.0,0.0,0.2430200611921322,0.0840452749914313,0.0,0.3038116686791784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646200436873087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168553088283753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18629196200149728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646096855523248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18469607374890173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13708581101415224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17984333574379158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690188158576955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146787979638873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zosomagik,2020/02/29,"(M25) Feeling angry, alone, and like no one respects me. I'm mostly just typing this to get it out, but insight is something that I would most certainly welcome. 

Right now in my life, I'm going to school for Engineering and I'm a little more than halfway done. So, the coursework right now is very high-stress and I don't have a lot of free time, even though I don't work. I decided to quit working and go back to school because with my stress and anxiety, school seemed like the easier thing to do. My grandma passed away a few years ago unfortunately, and she left me some money. Just enough to get me through school without having to work, if I budget wisely. I figured this would also give me some time to work on myself and force myself to come out of my shell by having to interact with my peers at school. It was great while the work was easy, but now that it's getting hard it's definitely a factor of stress in my life. But, Engineering is something that genuinely interests me, so there is some satisfaction to be had at times. School is definitely stressful, but it's the other things effecting the quality of my schoolwork that is the real stressor. So, school is stress factor #1.

My dad is a very volatile person, and unfortunately I think I have inherited some traits from him by growing up around him. He was violent, erratic, and unpredictable. I won't get into specifics, but whatever you're imagining is probably right on the money. I'm constantly creating imaginary arguments with people in my head. Like, if someone says this, I'll do this, or I wish someone would do this, because then I'll do this, etc. I'm aware of it, but I still just get so angry over nothing. It's mostly with men, and I think maybe it's because I fear men because of my father. The short of it though, is that I just work myself up over nothing, and then I'll snap at people over the smallest things. I imagine violent things, and while I don't want to do them, there they are in my head. My imagination is stress factor #2.

My girlfriend and I decided to move into a basement apartment in my mom's house, and while it's great a lot of the time, it's also very stressful sometimes. My mom is a big drinker, and a handful of times she'll have friends over until 5am, even though I tell her that I have things to do the next day and to please keep it down, there's just drunk people yelling and thumping around. My mom is the leaseholder at this place, but we actually lived here first, it's a long story but we split the rent and she pays the utilities because she has the whole upstairs with 3 bedrooms and we're in the basement apartment which is a studio basically. Even though it is her house, I feel so disrespected that she can't curb her drinking habit to the point where there aren't people here all hours of the night. My mom also is very passive aggressive sometimes. She went back to school in her 30's and got a 2-year nursing degree, which is great, and she makes good money now. But, I think part of her may be jealous that I'm going for my Bachelor's right now. Several times she has made comments like, ""You don't know how to load a dishwasher and you want to be an engineer?"" or, ""I thought you were supposed to be good at math,"" or I'll have a brain fart and her response is, ""An engineering major, huh?"" It hurts my feelings, and I can tell it comes from a malicious place. But maybe I'm making a problem where there's not one. We can't afford to move though, so my living situation is stress factor #3. 

Lastly, my emotional intelligence is at the low low end of the bell-curve. I have such a hard time communicating with people the way that I want to inside. I have a beautiful girlfriend who I've been with for six years, and sometimes I just know that I'm not expressing myself the way that she wishes I was. I want to, but I'm so scared of something that I can't put my finger on. Like I'm small and weak on the inside, and I want to show that to her, but don't want to be perceived as weak. I do macho things like box, lift weights, and other hobbies, and while I like doing these things, I know part of it has to do my fears and my perception of what I should be to be a man. It sounds corny, but I feel like inside I have something beautiful that I want to show to the world, but I'm just so scared that I'll be rejected. This coupled with my propensity for anger makes me very scared of the person that I'll be in 10 or 20 years. This passage is the hardest to type whatever you would call this. A ramble? I have tears in my eyes thinking about all of this. Couldn't sleep last night with all of the commotion in my house, and I have a lot of homework to do today, and I feel so tired in all regards. Just dealing with myself is stress factor #4.

Sorry that this is so incoherent, I just had to get something out somewhere.",5.1855001218111605,5.3287080400410725,5.725512476942889,83.41688598475622,68.18891170431212,8.862116729892456,29.44481954547037,8.644795401552905,1.9866748546966897,3797,126,795,55,59,1228,348,974,0.14800000000000002,0.733,0.11900000000000001,-0.9804,3,2,7,0,1,0,124.0,3,4,2,9,52,45,5,13,50,1,86,15,7,6,5,150,139,79,0,18,32,6,10,8,3,8,5,3,4,5,61,54,3,2,24,4,8,11,15,25,0,4,13,14,107,21,112,108,22,106,0,4,1,0,53,55,0,18,46,550,168,19,0.0,0.0,0.03975337738028298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036110839669394816,0.0,0.0,0.04219118455551648,0.0,0.09773194937369244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031163647844655643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252902723948643,0.0,0.0,0.03827369641088073,0.06264838513318782,0.0,0.124164303569341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04547589791474031,0.041596970732050056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018253398491914,0.0,0.04402216042523023,0.0,0.0,0.045074649637644015,0.0,0.02627195642489956,0.04199799671925122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04168803351330525,0.0,0.03990669280070569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045823574820328124,0.03608083776107994,0.04209214902350029,0.04543245678322794,0.08071909465094745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09168076681231696,0.10298910517530382,0.029102478305881432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034650820627678436,0.0,0.0,0.031473259040664475,0.0,0.12770021977918924,0.039078585147379295,0.06945522590497501,0.0683364255826164,0.03258105256606912,0.13473786155812786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298459395651365,0.0,0.0836157067565083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043040814063741516,0.0,0.0,0.040117680385735516,0.1410148790569141,0.043609737156469215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03620886430781107,0.0,0.0,0.06716387111433829,0.06641208689935373,0.0,0.0,0.044260804854864895,0.0,0.05754741136819446,0.15921609071314013,0.04082911618116816,0.07194292927988248,0.03605091026848839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389926968576038,0.0,0.03854627791097672,0.08157667197799635,0.0,0.08185146394137525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19084244862878766,0.0,0.08659384128119146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04332419818328494,0.07645771779293246,0.0,0.07817638584121876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05520881008539412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08822827316640719,0.0,0.14120932580175302,0.0711398499848016,0.08512286444207985,0.04471692740030619,0.038509575947334666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043921311684442216,0.03897975024448498,0.0,0.040951876642334135,0.0,0.04332875044187276,0.0,0.046367556538011966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391564978095581,0.0,0.03239565000535854,0.12235435163798067,0.3298236675809699,0.0,0.037085380496949386,0.0,0.046021147255147284,0.0,0.0,0.045790027733164165,0.04076636005341719,0.0,0.0690325546774449,0.15680643443473075,0.12086962685888444,0.04560166950839537,0.0,0.0,0.032532573163445135,0.0,0.419976247531032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121176279004557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894466911652884,0.10441034589191106,0.20011918516961533,0.032340580255521126,0.16627826249813196,0.04682112025448351,0.038613856180139634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16806121041712574,0.16819392001878214,0.0646701741587069,0.0,0.049606618716950164,0.0,0.03776355180471897,0.0,0.04548133906984669,0.09369094188268737,0.039268956769598184,0.0,0.17794186637554113,0.0,0.0,0.11575341442019856,0.0,0.0,0.1049330158180528
mentalhealth,DanielleSC1999,2020/02/29,"Help I currently for some reason have the lowest self esteem. I don’t want to take photos of myself (which I normally love), don’t want to look in mirrors and I just hate what I wear even if I love the outfit.
I’m already going to go get my hair done to help me feel better about myself but I want to know some other less materialistic ways to help? 
If anyone knows anything I can do or anything I can read or something to help this? I’m normally not like this at all and I just want it to stop",1.7630476190476188,3.3345942571428613,3.794285714285717,88.63904761904762,77.85714285714286,6.19047619047619,20.238095238095237,6.937597516519254,0.27738095238095184,387,9,85,4,9,132,65,105,0.08900000000000001,0.716,0.19399999999999998,0.8071,2,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,1,0,2,0,7,4,2,1,1,24,24,7,0,8,8,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,1,4,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,3,14,4,13,23,4,7,0,0,1,2,7,2,0,6,3,57,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18113868410534675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477437749428905,0.0,0.2701555851028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14517339016503833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797787658641136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841658046480078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299691657732261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575926930878125,0.0,0.18657538518215408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205973667946594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4400931792068341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18042019099652265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019321908002329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378409117115913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962955153676653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32165555378887384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16418995918786294,0.0,0.0,0.1687689525688014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17123959606585526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636725540448274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723302061640047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341701721911395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38726916724000815,0.13029108857084715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uhhazel,2020/02/29,"help for a school film project about mental health hello! i’m doing a short film to raise awareness about mental health & the ‘unintentional ignorance’ of it. the film is from an outsider’s perspective of someone with an undiagnosed disorder. 

i personally used to have friends who would brush off my mental health issues as ‘it’s just me being me’ or ‘it’s just a phase’. i feel like this is an issue in society that is severely overlooked at times. (& that’s why i’m making a short film)

so, dear people of reddit, what are some alarming signs/cries of help that your loved ones missed? did they eventually catch on?",4.306666666666665,6.49640620512821,4.706333333333337,82.15950000000005,72.41880341880342,7.756923076923077,25.375213675213672,8.548686976883017,1.7720947008547006,494,16,92,9,10,156,81,117,0.086,0.76,0.155,0.8865,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,0,5,7,0,1,9,0,9,4,0,2,0,10,16,3,0,1,3,0,1,1,1,1,3,0,0,1,9,1,0,1,1,4,0,1,0,3,0,1,1,2,7,4,16,13,1,8,0,1,0,1,9,6,0,2,2,56,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3317513013825841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816491335712333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17545725868935616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774081636695429,0.1093693065910428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182788792507095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4881904789413918,0.0,0.0,0.20522934014153615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31957757311259216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07479325839714471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13817195080231787,0.0,0.10219042692818063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4628436713948041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037394343755228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613505753566868,0.1336744586157146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549377747210417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17295093946698456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971477133194154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926946299134975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13222275888316745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381421616585694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875251359713453,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,outroversion,2020/02/29,"Feel better in a way admitting I needed help but now feeling very embarassed and also not knowing HOW to get help? I was asked to leave work the other day after being called into the manager's office over situations that had become more apparent and basically boiled down to me not handling my own mental health very well, pushing myself and others too hard, being overly critical of myself and others. 

I was able to admit this because tbh it's the least of my problems, the things going on that no one has any idea about, things like not eating unless someone gives me food in such a way that it would highlight the issue if i don't eat it, working relentlessly at work whether anyone is watching me or not, in my free time i'm a zombie. A non-playable character. No joy from anything. Recently married and feeling neglectful towards my wife's needs. 

On the surface, things look very good- like i say i'm recently married, financially i'm doing better than could be expected, hard worker, physically fit, outwardly confident.

It's the inside stuff that is the issue. I should mention my father committed suicide in rather a horrific way and only giving the explanation ""i couldn't live with myself anymore"" and he was the same as me, physically strong, hardworking, everything outwardly seeming great and i'm fairly terrified of getting to that point and i am terrorised by the thought that it is inevitable and push people away because i don't want to hurt them the way his death impacted everyone in his life.

I'm from England. I've tried to follow all the rules so hopefully I can get a little insight.

I've self-referred to nhs mental health and have a phone consultation on wednesday, i now have a week off work and no idea how to best utilise the time like i'm expected to come back better and each moment that passes i realise i'm not better and don't know how to be.  Are there online resources i could be utilising?

This might get deleted i don't know i followed the rules but either way it was probably good to get some of this out.",6.895699117022468,7.2540238946015405,7.234878730300661,73.31607577959092,64.55269922879178,9.952878059684814,34.39376327260534,9.761364909221204,3.39160122946239,1641,68,282,31,23,535,215,389,0.126,0.6709999999999999,0.203,0.9881,2,0,0,0,0,1,34.0,0,0,1,11,16,19,0,0,23,0,30,7,0,3,2,66,64,26,2,14,13,2,5,3,0,3,3,1,0,0,23,19,4,1,13,0,1,7,13,3,1,1,6,8,30,17,42,47,9,47,0,2,2,0,18,23,0,6,15,198,53,8,0.08327759183441377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659706010261546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05663161815770719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258899374327969,0.05822962851107736,0.0,0.06853036236903802,0.0,0.0778533067166229,0.0,0.07824203885912054,0.0640353277016971,0.0,0.10153049405519353,0.09197355739300944,0.0,0.0,0.08739469481109456,0.2946090499832856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850357322558871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173627146342867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298076144091633,0.0,0.0,0.053707157349916684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17042753344039702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795753077805776,0.07484452977065126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632295792942588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069959460731946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175455228881659,0.15977490884791928,0.047328574572354266,0.1396985859042465,0.0,0.09181383899316677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14920072979518287,0.0,0.0,0.17704037176844906,0.0,0.0,0.11163842878062252,0.0,0.0,0.08271343914684602,0.0,0.0,0.08915038444686195,0.18802052919547246,0.0,0.1738403393550338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13730155972505126,0.0,0.0,0.08817894541762962,0.0,0.0,0.05882142592362762,0.12205567456995048,0.08346602482644806,0.07353563930599716,0.0,0.06993220314345468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784845094090267,0.08834436468760118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234985582773664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564310514680154,0.06333636122208128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05773419655129011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872424198000996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978732910105651,0.07968540850109196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16445315050589274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622568354451251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581279191843847,0.08687669045121019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360750241620043,0.0,0.0,0.07056083331529878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533291866111934,0.0910921689667491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597779484404482,0.0,0.0,0.0661131057192488,0.09711966699860014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056540018370870415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061382043950586,0.04911928131194185,0.3305093807266265,0.06680026094266324,0.0,0.07487655629585653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425083147471401,0.0,0.0,0.0591580118883313,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hjuyrfck,2020/02/29,How can I deal with stress I'm a 20 year old M I'm just constantly stressed I started going back to school this year and I'm on my colleges bowling team but I'm constantly working between my two jobs and homework and helping out at home I don't have any time to relax I feel so terrible from the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep just super tired and feel like I'm gonna pass out while I'm working I'm not sure what to do because I need the money from my jobs to help my parents out and I want to continue school as well it just feels like so much I don't know how much longer i can go before I just crash,1.4240091563113142,2.5006867050359745,3.2604839764552014,94.19326357096143,77.63309352517986,6.205624591236103,23.42773054283845,6.574015621080383,0.4183035971223026,488,15,118,4,11,164,79,139,0.12300000000000001,0.698,0.179,0.8449,3,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,4,10,9,0,2,4,0,6,3,2,2,1,24,24,12,0,2,6,1,3,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,3,9,0,0,4,2,1,4,3,3,1,1,0,3,15,6,18,23,2,22,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,14,67,18,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870719522588599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161163672214072,0.0,0.0884822880230798,0.0,0.12351223175570507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137118613135164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496436067081816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201770896803216,0.20739083566061828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247476816064128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19458240012978326,0.0,0.14559760610246175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880785916873276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977082003235947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14182622935304193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134043732723061,0.1076271233152152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15231084425105307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16117225331953164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29379974671454195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452551461332285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273814379847082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3325384030017249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368024591066355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463831903944295,0.16682894071913545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417907717742939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561341963267245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050756980941589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21134232383212287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18694409467609546
mentalhealth,jadelawon,2020/02/29,"Is she a bad therapist? HELP  

Hey everyone, I really need some help. This is my first time going to therapy and I'm 22 years old. Yesterday, I just had my first therapy session as a client and I noticed a couple of red flags. My mother is paying for my therapy right now since I'm currently unemployed. But, I feel like I'm eventually going to have to bring this up to her since I might consider leaving after this.

FIRST RED FLAG

I noticed that when I looked up her office online she had one 1-star review on it. The client was basically complaining about the fact that they made a consultation appointment but she received to see them because they still had paperwork to fill out. On top of that, apparently they were double-booked with another client. They eventually still had to pay for the consultation even though they were not seen. The client even said it felt like a cash grab.

SECOND RED FLAG

Yesterday, I couldn't help but notice how cold and impersonal she was during my session. There were a couple of awkward silences that felt pretty weird. I felt like I was pushed to early to open up about my trauma and my past. If she's going to be cold and impersonal I don't know if I can be vulnerable with her... honestly. She basically wanted me to be transparent about my emotional abuse.. right then and there.. while she stared me down. ( I thought therapists weren't supposed to push you to share if you're not ready yet.)

THIRD RED FLAG

Today, I looked up her first and last name on Google. I noticed that she had three additional 1-star reviews that I've never seen before. All three of them DID NOT RECOMMEND HER. In fact, one person said SHE WILL DO MORE HARM TO YOU MENTALLY than good.

(Mind you... she didn't respond to any of these reviews)

FINAL RED FLAG

During my therapy session, she wanted to get some background information from me. She asked me if I have ever done any drugs. I told her NO. Then while I was petting the therapy dog, she said, WHY DID YOU SMILE WHEN YOU SAID THAT.

Honestly, I feel like.. anyone who's met me in person... knows that I SMILE a lot. Sometimes I do it subconsciously without even realizing it. I may have even remembered something that could have caused me to smile... BUT of course, she assumed I was lying. I told her I DONT DO DRUGS.

And then...

She said... IM NOT IN THE MOOD FOR STORYTELLING, I'LL HAVE YOU KNOW I MAKE MY CLIENTS TAKE A DRUG TEST.

(In my mind... I was kinda like okay... but... I'm not doing drugs though.)

\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_

But anyways... I would appreciate any of your feedback. I know that some people wait a month...until they switch therapists.

But I don't know what to do.",2.393708104143748,4.9390395306930746,3.5491034103410364,86.27395947928127,80.42574257425744,7.067473414008068,22.42115878254492,8.167268648758528,1.3770256692335896,2053,66,404,42,54,663,225,505,0.055999999999999994,0.872,0.07200000000000001,0.764,5,0,5,0,1,0,104.0,0,7,8,5,23,17,0,1,15,1,45,4,0,4,5,72,86,30,0,10,18,1,6,5,0,4,4,5,1,2,20,13,0,1,15,0,3,8,14,6,0,10,34,24,84,10,51,43,6,54,0,0,11,0,62,17,0,12,34,280,104,13,0.0,0.07737999379673664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323623182646052,0.06848174565379385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04566528107946901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061054710893516564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05452994047057168,0.039811507197626696,0.0,0.05557279556621072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708990679517372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05214359085431939,0.14452541405971905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683335703417352,0.07654117513859432,0.0,0.3029488976360488,0.0,0.0,0.07346336774488788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17254281761088505,0.0590753540512912,0.0,0.062405151633314115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604396568251943,0.09331293223871964,0.1881194498439505,0.07154236252641621,0.0,0.2222057958956123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034121040110631315,0.0,0.11134912154862964,0.054777742489875055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132490348708614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054447872793736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17945945153737916,0.05323521333421076,0.0,0.06915236161984423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595323786504055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968552589837906,0.0,0.0,0.055523023445741435,0.0,0.06179656215111622,0.04359398756659992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581569286082305,0.06928208797483502,0.13188610677796786,0.0,0.05212868940651903,0.0,0.0,0.04842548819946762,0.050370006840351714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974170271958761,0.06853037379182295,0.0,0.08850957468865457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06234443413088608,0.045276749668949484,0.11404987457310327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644230972834941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04183835182454919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398189557173407,0.11154634937101407,0.3106170988934816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05204248665385973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804787265973996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050277739363682336,0.06459186042655721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431104056654332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049103928109572495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734302928040958,0.227484902268384,0.0,0.0,0.1283307061971163,0.05184772139035389,0.0380819610672238,0.0,0.06190490217606065,0.12481030326662823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704139095115904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058930839793822236,0.0,0.0,0.06295514532496352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04639334493554775,0.0,0.0,0.04205658746533466
mentalhealth,cuspdecarabelli,2020/02/29,"Is it okay for me to say to people I’m not okay? My friend just died a few days ago. I’m trying to stay normal at school but people keep asking me if I’m okay. I’m not okay at all but it feels weird when classmates I’m not really close to ask me if everything is alright. The other day I ran out of a dissection (I’m in med school) because it was too much death at once for me. 

And then I feel guilty for having some okay moments and smiling and laughing because immediately after I remember that my friend isn’t here anymore and she will never laugh again. 

I feel like the polite and normal thing to say is that I’m okay even though I’m not. What would you guys do?",0.2648339160839157,2.393360986013988,2.2536669580419613,94.82357736013986,85.99300699300699,4.9736013986013985,17.329108391608393,6.322622252153567,-0.3368737762237757,523,12,119,5,16,174,84,143,0.141,0.693,0.16699999999999998,0.2887,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,7,13,0,0,4,7,9,0,0,0,2,27,24,12,2,5,9,0,3,1,2,2,0,2,0,1,8,7,0,1,4,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,2,5,12,12,15,20,4,17,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,3,10,74,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187353868688593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872532967704128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992479073774719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951284355307307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20643637535724105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16610530900707202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571067397469468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438414748010707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427763341620647,0.11433884173325075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473064971619878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15847340142570684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14225866133864198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819172308152529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17777805402736466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11765422894912997,0.0,0.12343944407379726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31362753956038075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704466696149881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219152689940188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025313120674222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813040067642923,0.0,0.0,0.2545543413778545,0.0,0.3239557103269066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17059064660560866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632926177217583,0.0,0.15724706054516024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086625789842926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369402282828725,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DUPNICK1,2020/02/29,"Feeling Alone, Uninspired, and Unfulfilled I (M21) have been feeling for the past few weeks like absolute trash. Everything bad in my life is taking over and I just want to escape. My problems are;

1. Overbearing and Coñtrolling Family - Constantly telling me what to do and treating me with disrespect. I could be hanging out with a friend and if I stay out late like 10:30pm I am told off for it and they need to know everything that is happening and is going on in my life.

2. Nightmares of my abusive father - though I havent seen him in 6-7 years the emotional scaring still remains. He and his family would emotionally manipulate me and my mother and sister and I remember once us being locked in our mums room while he Bashed on the door.

3. Feeling Unfulfilled at Work - I work in rain, hail and blistering winds and heat, never take sick days or leave however ever since I started work I have been paid minimum wage and have been yelled at by my boss over dumb reasons like kindling wood. I am always respectful yet there are employees who have worked there less do easier work who get paid more than I do by the hour.

4. Everyone Seems to Do Amazing Things and have Amazing Opportunities - Friends get to go away on holidays and family get to go and stay in hotels and see concerts while I can hardly afford for my car to run.

5. When things seem to be going well something always happens - from doing uni work and driving to different locations and almost breaking down due to a faulty radiator cap. Trying to save for a holiday and have too many bills for me to save up enough.

6. Having Suicidal thoughts - even though I feel I woildnt take my life I still think about it and earlier I was thinking what I would say in a suicide note.

Does anyone have any advice.",4.47329365079365,6.3910241071428615,4.996666666666666,81.40388888888894,71.32142857142857,8.66825396825397,29.11111111111111,9.250403328903447,2.6222884920634915,1404,56,260,31,27,448,202,336,0.106,0.742,0.152,0.8727,5,1,1,0,0,1,34.0,2,0,1,7,14,17,1,1,8,0,32,4,0,3,2,54,62,29,2,7,3,4,5,3,2,2,4,3,2,0,9,26,0,0,12,4,4,8,2,4,1,0,9,10,35,13,45,47,4,49,0,0,2,0,18,21,1,5,20,173,44,8,0.0,0.104611867696526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627815585589707,0.0,0.0,0.08841192537562445,0.09144413392443984,0.0,0.0,0.14693243458271352,0.0,0.0,0.06004175141542925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061735987665736285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295346663648766,0.0,0.0737203331004591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541254591396836,0.0,0.0704941698755201,0.0,0.0,0.05694119108256816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224659959275468,0.0,0.0,0.0772651349168998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986337741834648,0.0,0.0912294867523262,0.0,0.05831619234588562,0.07986538663175413,0.0,0.08436701976733965,0.15870274583289692,0.0,0.24970220046028094,0.0,0.17857283933835105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642873245078424,0.0,0.1383871550738644,0.0,0.20071406057346894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15615307390353125,0.0,0.07909250539527306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695007207261295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04852310650330181,0.0,0.09959749336417527,0.09348873461634412,0.0,0.0,0.1870902623710509,0.1294053871277938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951447415824478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546757780789629,0.06809641915063333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402835490730753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428493432097026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448375032010919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907791285965824,0.0,0.0,0.10001789728516162,0.0,0.0,0.07021353367695278,0.08839593574892574,0.0,0.07035748468438616,0.16075588000330018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303625397840555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797168053812601,0.0,0.0,0.0624937024774532,0.18821556207735665,0.14102059511271747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931547620540484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19915433093488927,0.0,0.07717131009914892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173148831306586,0.11314820564321705,0.17349335660790208,0.07009417685793076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436701976733965,0.0,0.05994463584978104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620469454814613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207705119820569,0.0,0.07082270986564332,0.0,0.07938532795300984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38566681715700346,0.0,0.0,0.12544054927545098,0.0,0.0,0.0568573083017811
mentalhealth,throwaway0012738282,2020/02/29,What can I do I have an extremely low self-esteem and I don’t know what to do to help myself out of this hole. I haven’t felt like myself in a long time and I feel like other people may think Im boring and I have no personality which has caused me to lose contact with some of my friends from high school. I don’t have confidence with anything I do. I just feel like I will never be good enough whether its my job performance or when it comes to socialising with other people. If anything I feel more like myself with the more I drink. Im kinda posting here as a last resort. Someone to talk to would be nice I feel like I haven’t got anyone I can talk to.,2.29335064935065,3.5459319714285726,3.7864935064935072,90.58396103896106,75.71428571428572,6.5194805194805205,21.298701298701296,6.980632752743323,0.3229999999999995,516,12,117,5,11,171,81,140,0.087,0.737,0.17600000000000002,0.9081,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,3,11,0,0,4,0,18,1,0,1,1,26,27,8,0,2,4,0,5,5,1,3,0,0,0,1,8,9,1,0,7,1,0,1,6,3,0,0,2,5,21,8,17,20,4,11,0,2,0,0,6,4,0,5,10,83,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996926687072412,0.0,0.2346563042470385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14646514142968936,0.0,0.1228168636510506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396705011968308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731943786782595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883634584200561,0.40742616797155146,0.13689561338036044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015410087877688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958624157092748,0.11403129705959228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556589299986956,0.15063969600848698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3080137549010379,0.0,0.14148498451238076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835620946847867,0.11621871936474007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3482779082251949,0.0,0.0,0.12617554481269133,0.0,0.1595064175878194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099636372757228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976889180658804,0.1244921315838642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654869008497353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14429483416374575,0.0,0.0,0.14873818262272473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080444198730815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291948692581083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913571403529072,0.0,0.0,0.08313739100368077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10128211756392214,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,De_Ja_Vu1,2020/02/29,"24 and Burnt Out Hello reddit, first time post here.

I'm 24, studying for my degree (undergrad) and for the last couple of years I've been feeling more and more exhausted. Diagnosed with HFA as a kid and Bipolar II about 5 years ago. So far I've been prescribed Risperidone, Lithium, Promethazine (for sleep), and Lamictal. Had varying results, initially positive but got tired of side effects and am now medication free (my doctor is happy with this). Only medication I take every day is beta-blocker, as I'm always stressing my blood pressure and heart rate are usually sky high, and this helps a lot.

Never took a year out, and I've worked since I was 16, built myself a career, and then left 18 months ago to study full time. Currently holding down 2 part time jobs, earning minimum wage to pay rent, which is exhausting. In all of these jobs, I've worked my ass off, but have been mistreated or abused verbally, forced to do things that were not specified in my contract. I get a lot of anxiety thinking about work, and coupled with my degree, it's too much.

I'm wanting to advance my studies to a Masters and eventualy a PhD level, but given my current energy levels, I don't know how I'm going to manage. I'm always either at work (to support myself), or studying, to support my degree, and I just feel burnt out. I'm worried that I won't get back the energy I had when I was younger, and want to try and better myself.

Can I reverse my burn out?

Thanks to anyone who can help.",6.060484068627452,6.196706253472224,6.668447712418303,77.42720588235295,66.3263888888889,9.415359477124182,32.91339869281046,9.168548406835145,2.8645785947712423,1163,46,215,19,17,382,175,288,0.113,0.7509999999999999,0.136,0.8085,6,0,1,0,1,0,48.0,0,0,0,10,10,10,0,2,9,0,19,12,4,3,2,44,41,26,0,2,8,0,2,0,0,1,8,0,1,1,9,22,0,1,5,0,4,3,4,4,0,1,11,2,22,7,33,29,9,41,0,0,0,1,5,17,1,4,20,133,31,14,0.0,0.13508442881362015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20212780034850364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18973262247242714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721812684702378,0.0,0.0,0.07971916394097255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766744555298628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083349213555366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523020751150855,0.0,0.07352768326123056,0.0,0.0,0.11571879680896392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669512154901801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605921108654394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529480609994205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09697772494167782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191321163963608,0.0,0.06479509644661903,0.0,0.0911850367993518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136686279587874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13510362097712858,0.152838381999672,0.12045891415931745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22627671265678906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265748113087799,0.09293420732125147,0.0,0.0,0.12387331904871962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938562033973576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22970823883818414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100251741787048,0.0,0.08381122624872221,0.0,0.08793233585984091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671052680212843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346283655366785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919105238094988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431110321039647,0.0,0.11409336865678064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305992510978365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587567343492855,0.0,0.0,0.085722106654736,0.0,0.0,0.10496603971310524,0.0,0.0,0.07574386313899971,0.0730536652635807,0.0,0.0,0.19944224752905312,0.13103890872568744,0.0,0.0,0.12667045073253236,0.0774060063404932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556704356857634,0.0,0.13449332031457234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3320055544695513,0.11578373646510053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220258098386319
mentalhealth,PiaBrock,2020/02/29,"Advice on anxiety and how to set boundaries Hi, I often find myself incapable of saying no to people who want to take advantage of me by making me do stuff thats their convince, and this after makes me feel so much anxious and I don't know ho to handle it, I just feel like I'm obligated to make them satisfied.
How can I learn to say No to stuff I don't want to do and don't feel bad about it or think that they'll get mad If I don't say yes? So I can take care of my mental health?",2.725674603174608,2.806537361111116,4.740105820105821,88.55833333333334,73.53703703703705,8.023280423280424,22.835978835978835,7.957251820313856,0.8059534391534395,377,8,91,5,7,131,67,108,0.14400000000000002,0.693,0.163,0.2818,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,3,1,7,6,1,0,0,1,9,2,0,5,0,22,24,10,0,3,3,0,3,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,8,4,0,0,7,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,0,6,15,4,15,23,1,3,0,0,0,1,8,1,0,3,2,61,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749813089002454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698506730390295,0.20229371046593667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14951270400384584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18256981099089256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27162358349702304,0.12792484914840352,0.0,0.0,0.16366316050692578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355464037444394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903388781881489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984100390605814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874826456891508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3585840129190989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18045650005465894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163417839322267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12414187899513948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4272016214332973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40997565947482456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26927082646769923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473831891024945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21123563645813107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TomorrowStreet,2020/02/29,"What happened to me? (trigger warning: panic attacks, derealization, paranoia) Hi guys, so this is quite a weird story. I'll just get straight to the point, also thank you for taking the time to read this.

so around my highschool years, (i'm now in my 20's), I had a traumatic injury that basically ended my entire sports career. (Sports were a huge outlet for me). That caused me to become extremely depressed and I ended dropping out. During those times I became extremely insecure and paranoid of those around me, even my friends. I thought one in particular had nothing but malice towards me despite them being there for me. Eventually I moved away and that was the start of my complete social isolation. At first it was nice, I did end up realizing that those friends I had were quite toxic. Though as things go, loneliness started to kick in and I sought friendship in those who were not as... friendly. Substances were introduced into my life and it was one day in particular that triggered the downfall of my life. I believe the substance I took that day was an 'artificial' strain, (though I can't say for sure as i'm quite inexperienced). And I remember having my first panic attack and time was no longer linear. I kept repeating mundane phrases trying to 'get back into my mind', my vision was tunneled, and I kept thinking I was going to die. 

After that day, I had panic attacks daily for almost 6+ months. I stopped going out and developed agoraphobia, I also started to think that everything wasn't real and that would trigger my panic attacks even more. 

I eventually sought companionship online and that did help ease the loneliness but it was no proper solution. For the following year, my paranoia slowly ramped up in intensity.  I began believing the people I spoke to online were spying on me because they would bring up stuff that I'd watched on youtube or google in convos. Mind you these weren't obscure videos, and my paranoid mind just kept connecting imaginary dots. 

It got to the point where I'd wipe my computer's hard drive monthly because I believed I had some sort of spyware. That turned to a weekly thing, and then daily, and then I scrapped the computer altogether after receiving a harmless email from one of them. Because in my mind that was confirmation that they were onto me.

The following year after that was the worst period of my life. I put my entire family through hell. I would confiscate and trash any electronics because I thought they were 'infected'. I couldn't even use a TV because I thought it would have a virus or spyware etc. I didn't use any sort of electronics for that entire year besides an old phone that I deemed 'clean'. Though if I clicked on any weird links or ads I would have to reset the phone and the router connected to it.

Then, one day, after going through a year and some change of this paranoia hell, I accidentally clicked on an ad and was about to do my 'cleansing' ritual (this would take about 2 hours to complete), at this time I believe my paranoia was at it's climax, my head was so tight, it felt like it was about to pop, and this thought appeared into my mind saying ""just let it go"". And at first I dismissed it, but it kept grabbing my attention and by some god given miracle, my delusion was broken. It was like I had woken up from a nightmare. Blood began circulating into my entire body, and I felt alive again. I realized that what I was doing was not based in reality and over night I restored my entire life. I was able to use computers again and I began reaching out to my friends. I was and still am ecstatic.

Though there were bumpy times during my recovery that the paranoia would bubble up but I pushed through it. This realization happened about 1 & 1/2 years ago. 

Fast forward to now, I am now working on my education and am looking to work in the film industry. I maintain a steady exercise/meditation routine and feel at my best. Which is why I'm coming here? I understand getting medical advice online is not the best idea, and I do plan on seeking therapy to keep my mental health in check. But for now, I feel this is appropriate.

I guess i'm looking for some closure. I came to the conclusions that I had a psychotic episode that lasted for a year and some change but everything I've read online points to schizo with that duration. I also thought that it all might've been a severe form of OCD, and lot's of stuff online does support that idea, BUT, those delusions I once had, I believed them to be true, which would be considered a delusion, not an obsession. Though, sometimes I did have a sense that what I was doing was wrong. So i'm lost with the diagnoses. I should probably leave it up to the professionals but what the hell.

Anyways if you made it this far, thank you. And I will be looking forward to your comments.",5.70623714994683,6.898117664835166,6.031775965969516,77.9598369372563,67.4065934065934,8.94789081885856,32.369727047146405,9.19923166143015,2.886361219425736,3825,161,689,70,62,1226,376,910,0.098,0.841,0.061,-0.9761,0,1,0,0,0,0,112.0,0,5,6,13,38,35,7,7,40,0,77,11,3,8,3,130,141,62,1,12,20,0,7,2,4,10,8,3,1,1,68,44,0,7,20,7,1,19,11,20,0,7,67,16,109,15,106,58,13,123,4,2,6,0,29,50,3,17,59,504,177,10,0.04798779225722924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04689311520392808,0.042538282418332345,0.0,0.048052842123385266,0.0,0.0,0.11512746039178325,0.0,0.05199475286162005,0.0,0.09790003291929056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543861822341,0.0,0.2183721657408849,0.045086110487190516,0.03689965013617002,0.0,0.1462645637671126,0.0529987463387504,0.0,0.2703290444256282,0.10072045472490887,0.0,0.0,0.05330361912440695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05488525024854466,0.0,0.049296681493924,0.10152944250793576,0.04133723390008797,0.10062857435150076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379262429964175,0.0,0.04133181515395073,0.04870659900599629,0.04980375206768788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041994440388326684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750882122563814,0.0,0.053519073366814836,0.09508645260675676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625666682018086,0.0,0.04523861973597485,0.0,0.048528139274163024,0.0,0.09215161211538662,0.0,0.0,0.12245517473827244,0.0,0.0,0.148300997036279,0.0,0.075214922493954,0.0,0.13636284109444954,0.0,0.03838022123635671,0.0,0.05286396336287479,0.0475154589646081,0.08487089242190028,0.0,0.042987636099483695,0.0,0.04924931933431858,0.051008779159102416,0.0,0.0,0.03216520561077358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04725830896873768,0.0,0.0,0.1083447527285256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042653754664092366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03911645553495493,0.0,0.050812143110196537,0.0,0.049070768855414684,0.13558078735560072,0.046888822679734994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120892978385273,0.0,0.05238434397461721,0.0407975049174057,0.0,0.04540720933006576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048342652127361135,0.04836040774609217,0.05090746413699232,0.2422699519898139,0.0,0.07660679589895393,0.0510034287464867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04503329225121036,0.0,0.046045580908725695,0.0,0.050355115558426734,0.0511054326018355,0.13007107986929445,0.0,0.0,0.2252133386656485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03326869292462477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609192412490312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051738956438608735,0.0,0.0,0.04824098553567397,0.0,0.15312277199900806,0.09600155687066596,0.0546206134534617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054360813966414415,0.0,0.0,0.07632363698379134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05421254606866149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048917510961066564,0.0,0.0,0.04746115358707049,0.0,0.10189801905443434,0.0,0.03832311288498158,0.0401199430781408,0.0,0.0,0.10986908231163868,0.0,0.05445597797243722,0.04522792629024477,0.0,0.072161695246006,0.0,0.0,0.08836142349447013,0.05487822262370642,0.0,0.06376191372205046,0.061497279232614326,0.2357388112269921,0.1904847338191452,0.13991033786396573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331620289764664,0.03258056094124511,0.05219693793442794,0.0,0.049956984120165936,0.0,0.12433813478037095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03849291236974196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04330151848853815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698713685902205,0.0,0.0,0.2727132062601074,0.052467117583446486,0.0,0.2163179541045916
mentalhealth,BigNickcheeses,2020/02/29,"[SERIOUS] Little voice in my head trying to control my every move? [THROWAWAY ACCOUNT] I am a 15 year old female and for around 2 weeks a little voice (male) inside my head has been controlling my body and making me say things to people I don't want (I wanted to add ''to say '' to the end of the previous sentence but the voice said no), and making me move in ways that are not natural, it's like my brain is slowly being taken over/someone has a studio/office like area in my head. I don't believe i'm schizophrenic as I don't have hallucinations or delusions and schizophrenic auditory hallucinations are outside of your head not inside. Any idea what this could be? Thank you!",5.992996183206106,6.405471152671758,6.829837786259542,75.26170324427483,66.48091603053436,9.298091603053436,29.35209923664123,9.188382445141503,2.4291595419847325,535,17,98,9,8,178,86,131,0.078,0.887,0.035,-0.6551,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,0,2,1,4,0,0,6,0,14,8,6,4,0,18,22,7,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,6,0,1,5,6,0,2,1,0,1,2,6,1,0,0,3,6,15,3,13,16,0,14,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,6,62,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941843064761627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329378392989135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560413381510193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538415539872376,0.0,0.15461107765871893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31067759286131225,0.11058046016013597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266931418327827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166916747264192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5685611554083813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563489065087456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532757182672284,0.27762546500823704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18489878147433106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944057782914813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533176838583908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601800970968184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13174459666658098,0.22028048212148285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735004872498232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751159232909712,0.0,0.0,0.092012813138507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403196644638356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338100854153956,0.1099343364016764,0.11109582339305273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918903969760784
mentalhealth,rys_robert,2020/02/29,I need help on how to love myself and be a better communicator In this past month I've been having a very hard time keeping my relationship stable. And very currently I messed up by not talking to her at her party because I slowly shut out everyone from my mind. I basically made myself antisocial. My attitude had an effect on other people at the party and on my significant other. So I am asking for help on how to be a better person in these types of situations.,6.872307692307693,6.54522150549451,8.883824175824177,63.786175824175864,64.71428571428572,11.236043956043956,31.386813186813182,10.793553405168565,3.4923257142857143,371,12,64,9,5,134,63,91,0.044000000000000004,0.7090000000000001,0.248,0.9608,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,3,4,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,4,0,12,11,6,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,13,3,17,6,0,15,0,0,0,1,9,11,0,0,4,52,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046235157030349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13342738748567426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3871636421619035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20914948802985373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19607373895674385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934216765872621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19455085034630895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19754799890594896,0.2071098138156164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22100668766052087,0.0,0.17470815174208254,0.0,0.0,0.16229695464929528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20894599466087846,0.15174402697647504,0.19111781842141806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349955077152884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24603060612830094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759276785155042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276308518114516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36119830899891997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slxtzzz,2020/02/29,"Do people who have had situational depression tend to not understand chronic depression? Hi, new to this subreddit. I’ve been dealing with on and off depression since I was 14, now 20. I’ve noticed a trend in my life where someone went through a rough patch, got depressed, and naturally healed with time and effort and now seems to advocate for mental health. My depression doesn’t seem to work that way and I know it doesn’t for many others. I tend to be ok for months and then not wanna get out of bed for months. It’s a shitty cycle I have grown accustomed to. 

My point is, I am getting tired of these people telling me how to cope or that I’m doing it wrong and that’s why I am still depressed. I don’t wish to belittle anyone’s experience but there is a difference between depression affecting you because of an event and having to live with it. I eat healthy, go outside, socialize, and I still fall to depression. It just happens. 

My brain doesn’t work like yours and I’m happy it doesn’t. My coping skills are gonna be different because my ultimate goal isn’t to pull myself out of this slump, I have done that multiple times already and know I will do it many times again. My goal is to just go through the day when I feel like this and take care of basic needs and focus on more taxing things whenever I feel better.

What do you guys think? Do people who don’t have chronic depression tend to invalidate your experience unknowingly?",4.158037263090264,5.813289077738517,4.979468358496629,82.27381545133312,71.65017667844523,8.679023450048186,28.05798265338901,9.218907990703514,2.3560473498233216,1151,43,225,25,22,373,156,283,0.128,0.7809999999999999,0.091,-0.8377,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,4,0,7,11,16,0,0,6,1,30,8,1,2,0,38,55,18,0,3,6,0,3,2,0,2,6,0,1,1,20,18,1,0,8,0,1,6,9,10,0,0,6,3,26,6,35,45,1,30,0,9,0,0,11,8,0,4,17,147,46,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679599318970056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061332563594357015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694084167516237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775770374790197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791926220204186,0.0,0.0,0.08943157436764736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656909940631456,0.09043060261114448,0.6799413829324955,0.0,0.0,0.1832875977142865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976318602724516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975463007611381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17160475110676918,0.0,0.0,0.08870296272123057,0.06266381390215837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165522747353842,0.0,0.09970123059387108,0.0,0.07015392274423546,0.0,0.0,0.0868519182532058,0.07756633284542139,0.09337454713132087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932372414001522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641204839948593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061955896652944376,0.08570651074638093,0.0,0.07745419968339283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17785905390068069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839637187096969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14002700005511448,0.0,0.0,0.06503976904057564,0.0,0.08471596447731601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998644282008862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18243219330572336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291929213901794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597053939892069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255898643880138,0.09859565038712828,0.0,0.0894146822049095,0.07432087250493292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400990725975723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595097462056637,0.0,0.07666702134811383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05827413476507039,0.056204409944603,0.0,0.0,0.15344245630867956,0.10081581147419297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131470042651073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962430683579274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813129437879244,0.07914939739522338,0.0,0.10086824367236376,0.0,0.0,0.12771553774862068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590288943084853,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Plsess,2020/02/29,"Why Why does everyone say that I deserve better or that they deserve better. Maybe some of us don’t. Maybe some of us deserve exactly what comes to us. We all see ourselves as the hero of our own story, but are we. Maybe I’m just an asshole who deserves to feel unhappy and unloved and a failure. Can’t sleep, I’m miserable and alone. Just needed to air out my thoughts",2.201942857142857,4.2515384133333365,3.3779047619047624,89.92800000000004,78.2,6.419047619047619,28.04761904761905,7.447530270364453,1.5805619047619044,291,13,60,4,7,94,53,75,0.21899999999999997,0.7090000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.9393,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,6,0,1,3,2,5,0,1,3,0,3,1,1,0,2,18,10,6,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,3,9,3,8,9,4,3,0,1,1,0,9,2,0,3,0,38,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17336525111806314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960851805896283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441914081884512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648385787772575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15994803537789684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463726377555175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5044963687345293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411734443387705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331150110498033,0.0,0.0,0.1333879219679931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675105907142866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13288872726303244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6040476108222708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020863438831733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sirius22Black2,2020/02/29,"What do you do when people casually say stuff like""I'm feeling depressed""or ""I've OCD-I like things clean"" without understanding the magnitude of the suffering? A really close friend of mine has OCD and she is going for therapy. Seeing her I always wonder if people just floatingly mention these terms and be all cool about it and how that must make her feel",4.299164835164834,7.336514169230771,4.55142857142857,78.97,76.53846153846155,8.021978021978024,26.20879120879121,8.841846274778883,2.5415714285714293,291,11,48,7,7,91,55,65,0.043,0.758,0.19899999999999998,0.8434,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,1,6,0,0,2,2,15,13,6,0,2,3,0,2,1,1,1,0,1,1,0,6,4,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,5,6,4,5,11,2,4,0,1,1,0,7,1,0,2,3,34,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233083462748947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713955264915423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20734478887855406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252290982611122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26222758399703194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914147167323466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721129458912151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719270095854842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21342147002526568,0.0,0.0,0.21385902435431287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30722358084503393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069086172403578,0.0,0.1782955044591769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793863974595159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587025874998645,0.2910397369370272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Content-Nerve,2020/02/29,"20 minutes can have a big impact! Hello!! 

I wanted to reach out to you as I’m currently doing research for my dissertation on childhood experiences and their link to behaviours later in life. I’m hoping this research will better help aid intervention for children who experience trauma. I desperately need people to take my survey. It’s only 20 minutes or so to take and anyone over 18 can take it. 
I would be soooo grateful if you could pass this along as this research could be a big step on further assisting children in need. The more participants, the better! 

The link is below

https://apps.mhs.manchester.ac.uk/surveys//TakeSurvey.aspx?SurveyID=94KL7om00

Thank you so much. I genuinely appreciate you’re help 💛",6.151036236490783,9.64215136363637,6.276363636363634,66.64223776223776,72.55371900826447,8.020597584233949,28.31595677050223,8.841846274778883,2.9554610298792117,589,23,84,13,13,187,80,121,0.042,0.765,0.193,0.9541,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,3,1,2,2,5,0,0,5,0,11,1,0,0,0,15,21,8,0,8,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,4,17,15,2,15,0,0,0,0,10,10,0,3,3,57,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431339194849688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3620884171691803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32687925524912115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4004799276059335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27441778841975994,0.0,0.0,0.2033174355030842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445886133472741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048112294182647,0.303571105448827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15568675018951364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14191610099538354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4617361938624668,0.0,0.0,0.18846410240925504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073982672112595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541597339753615,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PoppinSoda,2020/02/29,"I kinda of really want to die. My life has thrown so many curve balls at me, so many individuals who’ve taken advantage of me..I just don’t know how to mentally tackle anything anymore. The only time I feel okay is when I’m sleeping, and I kinda of wanna do that forever.",3.4848214285714287,4.450252125000002,6.095000000000002,76.3,72.39285714285714,9.171428571428573,26.5,9.516144504307137,2.3622285714285707,213,7,42,5,4,77,44,56,0.077,0.8270000000000001,0.096,-0.2345,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,1,1,4,2,1,1,0,9,9,5,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,5,2,7,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911859004080876,0.0,0.0,0.24161906287113005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047246716337044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845991206863418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16136241438437054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20738804403041716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5953564276243875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958935573864311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22330645446959824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18809645873864206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938257507231877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17120851338997067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17318097131289684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ungeschlechtlich,2020/02/29,"Is this possible? Would it be a bad idea if I ask my therapist/ psych, if I forget something or it comes up between sessions, for an email or a way to leave a message for them?",5.132432432432432,4.212308864864866,6.295270270270272,82.87912162162164,68.45945945945945,9.562162162162162,34.71621621621622,8.841846274778883,2.7160378378378387,136,6,30,2,2,46,30,37,0.19399999999999998,0.8059999999999999,0.0,-0.7149,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,5,4,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,5,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,4,0,23,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31067288208359306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774720167848381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28626291092033834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751470692738588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35187724539049825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746391097896489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25583497103122965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38584732274785705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637789098406549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23606948537947184,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nano7327,2020/02/29,"Question about blackout episodes. Question for the experts!  Google has been no help. 
I have had these extremely dissasocitive episodes, rarely, but often enough for slight concern. More often when im using drugs (cocaine, alcohol) but occassionaly when totally sober. 
This will happen only like 6-7 times a year. (Which seems like alot now that i write it) 
Ill stand up and proceed to make my way where im going; the bathroom, kitchen, etc.  and moments after standing up, ill make it a few steps, and then need to lean against a wall (if im lucky enough for one to be there) and COMPLETELY -COMPLETELY. zone out for a good 60-90 seconds. I cant speak, cant hold myself up, cant move. All i can do is hug the wall and tremble while i try to make sense of what is happening and how crazy i must look. Literally 0 motor control..  my mind is there, saying “get right, this a party and your being wierd as fuck”, but i cannot move from my position until the feeling has passed. 
Friends will notice and ask if im okay but i cant answer till i come out of my trance... and when i respond, its with the same wierd bewildered look they are showing to me...”what just happened?”  
When this happens it will usually last about 30-45 seconds. If i am holding something when one of these episodes hits, it will just fall from my hands no matter how soon i might percieve it coming. 
It scares the shit out of me though it hasnt been dangerous yet. (Like while driving). 

*it IS a very similar feeling to lightheadedness when standing up too fast. but its not just that. Ive experienced that, but this is like 20x the feeling of that. Like im leaving my body, like the boss is out of the office and the machines are left to run thenselves with no instruction. Everything halts. 


Can someone help me identify or understand what is happening to me?  Thanks!!  Loveeeeeeeeeeee!!!!",3.3283679577464795,5.515340473239436,3.727548415492958,88.09709727112678,75.25352112676056,6.803697183098593,27.43177816901409,7.756953410329674,1.6091426056338034,1448,58,286,21,32,451,196,355,0.073,0.758,0.168,0.9886,0,0,4,0,0,0,67.0,0,1,1,1,23,17,3,2,17,1,34,10,3,8,3,64,59,35,0,5,14,0,4,6,1,6,4,2,1,0,23,18,2,4,8,1,0,10,10,5,0,4,3,9,25,12,37,47,9,49,0,0,2,2,12,13,2,12,28,195,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640368412030424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433122345599374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019946960459224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541041977066195,0.18916032237049032,0.0,0.10117464760307028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046113019306982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18641557029551234,0.10060447776666363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107209610918059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683387439847733,0.06444378840546686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696935850180543,0.08339477503418029,0.04712935359138904,0.0,0.051266629080286334,0.07566122211904668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3988480775430569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092749403750827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4871943632300469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353061877968138,0.0,0.09551602447915353,0.09801000151063198,0.0,0.0,0.26442304894501817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150206198759752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18064130939356274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095695207740703,0.0910831988118948,0.0,0.0,0.19175120160175196,0.0,0.06688723288588286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102701091418714,0.0,0.0,0.1222529860813167,0.06860637083213879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021046233951416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703615312267617,0.0,0.07173610413038177,0.09031278899539184,0.0,0.0,0.08212092415506228,0.0,0.0,0.09259603053545136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643196740778985,0.06944563672630795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305034360789444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862776763818662,0.0,0.052600336999442485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061244526719913886,0.0,0.0,0.09390850741678146,0.0,0.0779097514782247,0.0993500959234124,0.07443009471189344,0.0,0.07160199512606723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058090250914812014
mentalhealth,Fucotrucko,2020/02/29,Scared to talk to someone I feel like i need to talk to a mental health specialist of some sort but I get a lot of anxiety thinking about talking to someone and Im worried about how things will be in my records I have a lot of suicidal ideations but I dont think im a major risk to myself but I dont want to be medically classified as suicidal because I know that can fuck with your ability to do certain things if it shows up in background checks ive talked to a social worker in the past because thats who was recommended to me by my doctor but I feel like i actually need to talk to a therapist or psychiatrist I need help,4.66090909090909,4.6781903939393965,6.310151515151517,79.21022727272728,69.30303030303031,9.933333333333335,33.16666666666667,9.827888789773867,3.0320575757575763,500,22,106,11,8,173,78,132,0.2,0.684,0.11599999999999999,-0.9285,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,0,1,3,6,1,2,7,0,10,4,0,1,1,23,21,9,2,5,6,0,2,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,5,1,1,0,2,3,0,0,1,2,16,3,24,17,4,5,0,0,0,1,9,4,1,6,3,73,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.12195662241457708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560478841570222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15236601351296056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791621200953626,0.0,0.0,0.2929372572500891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263812459759391,0.1785629394014289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553647395100135,0.06529377087841884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328415464153414,0.0,0.0,0.08376745580942005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26998678914036256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868245676366368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211199360295245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124968969051889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589818404370828,0.12594442478674656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27799997194573617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930184966484697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512080269935022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739528194918365,0.21178017466476867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27340260237811026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5022469439580971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14510447746075025,0.16605438045907955,0.16015662025776467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371291895865066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691719057599885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xspeed78,2020/02/29,"I need advice So about 4 months ago I was fired from my job for causing property damage. In the time since I've been diagnosed with major depression and learned about anger attacks which seems to line up with what happened that day. Since major depression is covered by the ADA is there a chance that if I go to my old HR and plea my case they might reinstate me, even if just to avoid a potential issue with ADA violation or is there no point since all they probably care about is the damage? I've been almost obsessing over this glimmer of hope since I haven't had luck getting a new job and am relying on family to get by, so please share your advice even if it just serves to bring me back to reality.",11.443191489361705,6.586003531914892,10.555517730496456,69.61200000000002,59.780141843971634,14.684255319148937,40.96595744680851,11.979248473330829,4.475571914893616,562,18,115,12,5,181,95,141,0.222,0.6940000000000001,0.083,-0.9706,2,1,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,1,2,0,12,13,3,2,6,0,11,1,0,1,1,22,20,9,0,5,6,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,9,0,0,4,1,12,4,21,15,3,14,0,4,0,0,4,5,0,9,7,74,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927378967174523,0.13277607246780312,0.0,0.14998884029480364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040296913156106,0.0,0.1151760330220866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527166038746603,0.15387127505737375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659944831191153,0.0,0.2580205768600448,0.15202943211673578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978642139780753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120471986472524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15651379466469378,0.0,0.08512672088175002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13245508659466854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487710946514764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15633745765617027,0.2972785845954169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15889906134273982,0.0,0.0,0.11955759501260645,0.0,0.0,0.11106427137060676,0.0,0.14466405719032413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571749984345603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644198264952738,0.1415959942637736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16149442429158006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635936503942078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4956174401657369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734130342420635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lon3some,2020/02/29,"I don’t know who I am. Literally. 

I don’t know what I want or who I am or what makes me to myself.

I feel like a blanco canvas that is usually painted in childhood and in the teenage years. Mine is still untouched though. I don’t even feel like I have a personality. I don’t know what I like. One day I love the 20s, the other day I wish I was a 90s kid. 
I love dresses and girly shit somedays, other days I just want to wear gym clothes and oversized jackets. Some days I want to go to university and on others I want to work in a 9-5 job without big challenges- just something totally boring. 
I can’t decide and it’s tiring because I don’t know who I really am.",0.2992540792540801,2.2713223286713315,2.898629370629372,91.26076456876459,84.45454545454545,5.491655011655011,22.12074592074592,6.742157984588678,0.4879943123543122,515,18,117,6,15,179,78,143,0.057,0.758,0.184,0.9244,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,5,8,1,0,7,0,13,5,2,1,1,25,28,8,0,5,5,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,11,5,0,0,7,1,0,1,7,2,0,1,1,2,23,6,10,27,2,14,0,0,0,2,7,5,1,3,11,79,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979941538936524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4146921565989662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061765090823629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625641175731654,0.22968539715608066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913602098240405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952355255501016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35338480453556403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356088713780756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901735448916155,0.0,0.1073045515517189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893107914812618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036420305552624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029831366845628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501168363037708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375629247524053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283783619562917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15794000098934946,0.0,0.0,0.18476308938215608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770478335017304,0.0,0.3792675260231784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848591808064622,0.15496113143235873,0.0,0.117030835597544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352031345765136
mentalhealth,theshoeonthewrongfo0,2020/02/29,"I want to communicate (not just talk) with my parents about my experience without being dramatic ⚠️English isn’t my first language but I do feel pretty confident writing in English due to going to plenty of American school and a slight obsession with trying to be perfect

To start I should state that I have been formally diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, General Anxiety Disorder and Attention Deficit Hyperactive Disorder (ADHD) as well as struggle with self esteem (but no related diagnosis to that.) Finally, I have a separate (but *very* related to my anxiety) medical condition that causes nausea, head aches, semi-frequent vomiting and stomach aches that vary in severity from “this is annoying” to “I was misdiagnosed with abdominal migraines.”

Anyway, sometimes I feel overwhelmingly anxious because ADHD makes it hard to get my work done and it’s hard to get to school but I manage. HOWEVER, if that anxiety persists it will build up and up and up and up and then BOOM I don’t feel it at all and because of that It’s near impossible (or rather it feels like it is) to go to school. I just feel super lethargic and out of control/ will to regain control. My mom gets pissed that I’m missing school because “You’re just being lazy! You’re not sick today!” It feels like she’s right (probably because of my self esteem issues, my mom is super nice but she never thinks that her words could affect me as much as they do) but I really need to tell her how I feel but every time I try I can’t help but feel like I’m being over dramatic and asking for attention. 

There’s also different levels of what I can comfortably say around different parents (I have four)
- I absolutely cannot talk about ADHD with my step dad, he literally just thinks it’s not real, he also doesn’t fully appreciate therapy (which I have gone to for a few years) and thinks that it doesn’t work if you haven’t stopped it soon after starting
-my dad doesn’t ever say anything but he gets uncomfortable when I mention pretty much anything
-my step mom relates with my depression but we don’t talk (she dislikes me)
-my mom is super understanding but really anti-meds, she doesn’t stop me so long as I have strong reason and plan to stop in the long run. She’s a super believer in “you control everything in you! Are you sad? Cry, now stop it, go to work. Is something wrong? Well, fix it.” I don’t mean to assume (but I do feel like I know my own mom) but I think this comes from when she was pregnant with me while in college and felt abandoned by my dad and she managed to better her life significantly through hard work, especially after we immigrated to the U.S.

I don’t know what to do, I know that to a certain extent she (my mother) is right about having to take control but how much is me and how much is my condition/Illness? And how do I communicate these feelings/struggles to my parents (the ones that will talk to me)?


TLDR: What do I say to my parents that are generally unfamiliar/ignorant about mental illness to smooth our interactions in regard to my Depression, Anxiety and ADHD?

Thank you so much for taking time out of your day and reading this",5.0367318181818215,6.558240555000001,6.169515151515152,75.11809090909092,69.28333333333333,9.52121212121212,31.303030303030305,9.855512778267206,3.232916666666666,2503,106,446,61,44,836,263,600,0.16699999999999998,0.7,0.133,-0.9432,7,0,1,0,0,0,72.0,3,6,1,18,27,29,2,3,8,0,48,10,3,12,5,112,88,53,0,7,26,13,14,4,0,4,7,4,0,2,33,33,0,9,23,1,0,8,18,12,2,3,6,18,75,17,79,73,10,55,0,7,0,0,52,20,1,4,30,319,108,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624590199024224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732209729727748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670656386167384,0.061678854112185336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898570441605996,0.04860273544682935,0.05104064664077223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312683272906328,0.0,0.0,0.06151190786094901,0.0,0.0482864410374487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0560859625044664,0.0,0.04703031685498845,0.0,0.0,0.2449398562328547,0.043591109619993934,0.0,0.0599720313154026,0.03521042529837915,0.0,0.14107245547056158,0.05541461215613647,0.0,0.11408409069913288,0.1877180204104753,0.0,0.0,0.05587149149141347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04938593971183077,0.046000166551791656,0.0,0.04906809175008252,0.05340615577324685,0.0,0.0,0.24845208496133014,0.1560158858082996,0.05242149882306715,0.059808135885294926,0.0,0.04644001807501748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409831777533062,0.0,0.09308587467781326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467240516014321,0.0,0.056032077491778735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036595090402924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05698488418243192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001493563608537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03856334100749509,0.1066929728735726,0.0,0.0,0.09663291628667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03644379413948426,0.0,0.0,0.05947193089907895,0.0,0.05500054146476012,0.055020742438460855,0.0,0.0,0.3197156157941794,0.0,0.0,0.2006746840174275,0.0404828422806991,0.042108425096230855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03699621093847797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24249318239418505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108916587144288,0.05886459459129498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05461158394284827,0.06214312171295724,0.06995222810025258,0.05613461301620802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325075361086743,0.0,0.13025272226300982,0.0,0.22101954306666333,0.0,0.0,0.1139127583823794,0.061678854112185336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0420312911354898,0.053997640405698426,0.0,0.07728780522032783,0.0,0.0,0.18258150893497954,0.0,0.1141528785762284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210001182990509,0.17553138880621916,0.0477200177545282,0.05026540666396533,0.06243620956035996,0.0,0.0,0.13993372343297492,0.0,0.0,0.06367167708351956,0.0,0.05175139135144788,0.0,0.0,0.07413529933248666,0.0,0.0,0.056837203910879736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045048085488897965,0.032202612662516616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817817669544662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05262937584544596,0.0,0.15898850957624258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05969304018700131,0.0,0.03515855514374118
mentalhealth,sylvanwhisper,2020/02/29,"Any insight as to what mental illness or affliction this may be? (Roommate having outbursts.) I live in a place that's part Airbnb. One of the tenants, whose room is next to mine, woke me up at six in the morning last weekend. I couldn't actually make sense of what I was hearing...it sounded like kids playing, like screaming and such. I went to the bathroom and that's when I heard her through the door saying in a rough voice, ""KILL. KILL HIM. DIE."" 

I am not exaggerated when I say it was with the same cadence and tone as the demon in The Exorcist when he possesses Regan and makes her say ""Your mother sucks cocks in hell."" 

I myself have mental illnesses and I'm not trying to pike fun or make light. I'm trying to paint a picture. 

She would then burst into laughter, then heart wrenching sobs. I think she was smacking herself. She was also making unintelligible noises that sounded like snoring but demon-y. I knocked and she stopped mid-screech and said thru the door in her normal voice she was ""so sorry! Omg!"" 

At this point I convinced myself she was recording an audition for voice acting. Or roleplaying as a demon for some game on the mic. Because it didn't make any sense. Until five minutes later it resumed. My house is three stories. She woke everyone in the house up wailing. She was very combative. If it were just crying and judging by her other behavior, I'd guess BPD. I have it and when I was younger I might have wailed at 6am not thinking of anybody else. 

This lasted six hours after multiple attempts to talk to her by the host. She cited boyfriend problems...

Then she'd go back in her room and start scream whispering ""DIE. MOTHER FUCKER. WHOOHOO! HAHAHA. RRraaahhHhhh. *crycrycry*"" 

And now it's happening again a week later. Does anyone have any idea what would cause this behavior? It's honestly frightening. I need to know if I ought to be concerned for my safety. Since she was so quiet all week, she asked to stay another month, but idk if I can handle this again.",2.239564327485379,4.9730344710526335,3.1364912280701773,87.61599415204678,83.23684210526315,5.5883040935672526,24.49707602339181,7.0316486544052195,1.1755426900584809,1569,61,292,21,45,497,217,380,0.10099999999999999,0.823,0.075,-0.9004,0,0,0,0,0,0,64.0,0,1,0,1,13,16,5,0,17,0,29,5,2,6,1,50,51,33,4,10,12,2,1,3,0,5,2,14,5,1,20,13,0,1,5,3,1,3,5,9,0,5,16,16,44,7,41,26,4,48,3,1,0,2,34,19,5,10,28,197,64,0,0.0,0.0,0.1045862612918676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570692494025448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186457708137093,0.11238117334813788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493847915220225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019312421345394,0.0,0.0,0.08241010964143762,0.0,0.06533221150999184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498176868410447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100971123542196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177254909250572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22245916442605826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378859756018344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895300368406816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240924930528224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06090939423079275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806412799955172,0.0,0.09477352121286836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270015813447086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105544697828044,0.2473285702831444,0.0,0.12098628196314645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371440708963667,0.0,0.05889996973541421,0.17472205712108935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15707925429110706,0.0,0.09463651261364324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3576970349460728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21601215675232124,0.11369456581878963,0.0,0.0,0.08554518032033705,0.0,0.0,0.07946808498902637,0.0,0.0,0.11398065296723825,0.0,0.10500766171873588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262380478982867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160588840344519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197390925163472,0.0,0.10131397223785503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025509431604532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194691651733673,0.25568694833919553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865535327222689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997240075797752,0.07585823435120552,0.11423311190242864,0.0,0.08960217497121761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861423169547618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734540857454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14552807896222694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842968735748677,0.0,0.0,0.17193686753681198,0.0,0.0,0.09935127419679886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522665197747601,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisispassmyboi,2020/02/29,"When I feel angry, I hurt myself. It’s not like cutting or anything super serious, but as I get frustrated I hit myself.  Like my friend is getting me mad right now and I just hit my head.  Not hard enough for blood or anything, but still.  My jaw is swollen from two days ago.",1.0673809523809543,3.2885662142857166,2.3785714285714303,94.63309523809528,83.28571428571429,5.161904761904762,21.833333333333336,6.42735559955562,0.3117833333333335,212,7,46,2,6,68,42,56,0.23600000000000002,0.5770000000000001,0.187,-0.5149,0,0,0,0,0,2,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,9,3,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,9,7,7,0,0,7,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,0,2,11,4,3,5,1,6,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,7,30,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243981752116328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4529946068008245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775056470233066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843942805849271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916852978004718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21264808450467884,0.0,0.287600839088888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465590564223425,0.0,0.28247344600225793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946478170593645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268934626921922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350516248360955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21980530704737825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26886739132836746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,impressionistpainter,2020/02/29,"How to find a therapist? Does anybody have advice for looking for and choosing a therapist? 
I’m 19F living at home and have insurance through my step father. I have never been to a therapist but I desperately want and need to see one. 
On the health insurance app it lets you search for doctors, but there are so many I don’t know where to start or what to look for. I want to get in ASAP. Hoping to have some guidance or maybe resources on how to choose or what to consider, as I will probably be paying at least the copays on my own.

Going for depression, anxiety, and trauma/“daddy issues” as some may say, if that matters.",4.166747967479676,5.458069739837399,5.377398373983741,80.85113821138212,71.11382113821139,8.71869918699187,28.300813008130078,9.150863307647796,2.3822617886178863,490,18,94,10,9,163,82,123,0.08800000000000001,0.8490000000000001,0.063,-0.7278,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,0,11,2,0,2,1,25,23,15,0,5,6,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,1,2,2,1,0,1,1,4,8,1,23,18,4,11,0,1,3,0,3,7,0,8,2,72,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16568924445843738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971072422718655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603928946013456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17354888573165006,0.1483805686429185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497212576876815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858659120020274,0.0,0.09636321244553483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18023127793631852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17007960509048894,0.16840846741376647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697356939477865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318415276210207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733836317184407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972203360844932,0.0,0.2847705348909183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190429540642713,0.17034290593666776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12572444781540715,0.13077289526491798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489628517808075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18281124135389049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483861853888013,0.0,0.0,0.13511506317801342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001339440070875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5906066162147409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20001835183092406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,b_happ3,2020/02/29,"Am I faking my own mental illness? Hi guys, I used to be depressed a few years ago but then the symptoms decreased a lot to the point where I thought it ""disappeared."" But lately, I've been almost wanting to be sad when I would feel neutral (neither happy or sad, feeling no apparent emotion) so that I could feel something. Could I be ""addicted to sadness"" or is it just me unconsciously faking a mental illness? I don't tell anybody/show it so it doesn't make sense that I'd do it for attention; I don't get any attention from it. Is there a chance that I could have romanticized mental illness subconsciously that I'm wanting myself to feel sad?",4.74642857142857,6.025212214285716,5.696984126984128,79.15357142857142,69.71428571428571,8.13968253968254,33.04761904761905,8.515128840125781,2.725323809523809,513,24,94,8,9,169,76,126,0.261,0.655,0.084,-0.9769,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,0,6,0,16,5,0,2,0,22,27,8,0,6,5,0,4,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,10,0,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,2,4,12,2,7,18,4,8,0,5,0,0,3,2,0,4,5,67,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18103935028843154,0.0,0.0,0.14720984564406744,0.0,0.1662937727991982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293238243509755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3977769317592476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14303469211958714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868048884467529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3358772139264672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676401977225187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644340810731116,0.0,0.17678317487927178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18733268009383436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411856346829394,0.0,0.0,0.1108521190126697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.502074443644085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569885603028581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784776660121427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17260892261005795,0.0,0.0,0.14515132719621196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183996470427758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14343000068099784,0.0,0.0,0.19590319480575985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797041017030975,0.0,0.0,0.10694277122164267
mentalhealth,arianalove3344,2020/02/29,"Is psychological abuse to blame In part has psychological abuse for decades been to blame for how I interact with people, cause people always stop talking to me, I think he abuse has warped my idea on healthy relationships I am also bipolar , life has started to become hard , it’s not a surprise cause it’s happened a lot over my life .",9.18095238095238,7.896308365079367,8.707936507936505,70.03428571428573,60.587301587301596,10.939682539682536,38.460317460317455,9.725611199111238,3.58604126984127,269,11,49,4,3,86,44,63,0.315,0.648,0.037000000000000005,-0.9590000000000001,0,0,0,0,3,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,6,3,0,3,0,9,9,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,6,1,10,8,2,5,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,31,8,0,0.0,0.6334326701665484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251077020536085,0.1482811437828398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19681383055661306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3661320083510956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15758642038009246,0.0,0.15963700864235592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20117217178040275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25174344633343776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151503833102483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19297904999454868,0.0,0.2470903311658021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19132587615079005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613467828118954,0.0,0.0,0.14898766903753782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323472630776396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141868056389374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,german_pope3,2020/02/29,"why am i so unagreeable it seems like every time i talk to someone i just end up pissing them off, in the long run. it seems like i have a problem initiating the conversation but that is just because im scared of making someone not actually like me. but then a lot of the time when i do make a friend they sort of piss me off too lol what to do. what do you do?",1.9776923076923083,3.0304088205128217,4.154358974358973,88.43230769230772,76.1794871794872,7.2512820512820495,24.538461538461537,7.793537801064563,0.9785999999999996,280,9,67,4,6,97,52,78,0.134,0.695,0.171,0.4957,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,2,0,5,8,2,1,6,1,7,2,2,2,0,12,11,5,0,1,5,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,10,4,9,11,1,11,0,0,0,0,6,4,2,4,9,47,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.2132377133162453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332038378291969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935381556416668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841070984675568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688230341850105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360321416010488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32026406318304057,0.0,0.0,0.19337762412193035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18577241434592395,0.0,0.0,0.2917189957829866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20908796574086616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21877019326761468,0.0,0.0,0.3978530759278133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3702916600766121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17563292214772908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548340278118719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19717450002753567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThtCaviarIsAGARNISH,2020/02/29,"Scary side effects, please help! Any doctors, nurses or pharmacists?  My partner was put on two medications last week, Risperidone (2mg) in the morning and Benztropine (1mg) in the evening.

He is suffering from hallucinations, heavy breathing, slurred speech and lethargy to the point of falling asleep at work, during conversations, etc.  He is ‘checking out’ and has completely lost any filter he previously had.

His personality has also reverted to that of a twelve year old- not handling responsibilities, making inappropriate jokes, making jokes at serious times, ignoring serious issues, etc.  

Tonight he had all of us in the van and couldn’t stay in his lane, nearly hit some things, was talking to himself and was paranoid that something was in the back windshield.

They came on hard and fast, and we are scared.

I tried to get him to take some time off of work, so that he could see his doctor, or take time to get used to the meds, also so that he doesn’t get fired- he won’t take the time off.  I called the doctor and she said to stop the medications immediately but he won’t, because they are helping two very serious issues.

I don’t know what to do.  The benztropine is SOLELY to prevent tremors associated with his meds.  If that’s the one causing these issues, he agreed to stop taking it.  I googled but don’t want to rely on that. 

Thank you.",5.7831726907630525,7.398027658634543,5.870060240963856,77.61585341365465,67.59437751004016,8.424899598393575,31.50401606425703,8.841846274778883,2.580905220883533,1073,44,194,18,18,339,146,249,0.10300000000000001,0.8270000000000001,0.07,-0.5249,0,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,2,1,2,4,6,10,0,1,12,0,21,7,2,5,1,34,39,17,0,4,6,0,2,0,1,2,5,2,0,2,10,12,0,4,2,2,1,3,7,7,0,3,9,5,17,3,32,25,5,33,0,2,1,0,29,16,0,5,13,120,27,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607669242516204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412253306050576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984418085928054,0.0,0.06329802174074088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060291034562858,0.11876177229810796,0.0,0.10666911849944592,0.0,0.0,0.10887103347162973,0.0,0.0,0.08290533013866316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188444581081374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23161122436401516,0.06858330536273671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275151262307785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301748333043594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919939537015438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3251362957201083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706605483990133,0.0846409475098378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335026264664275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13862389881690929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23067881620110675,0.20920954239025424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895937872039424,0.0,0.07036258329903383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066639206123073,0.0,0.113981754876231,0.09815945104463164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438478304607796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098772687912592,0.0,0.1039588699196194,0.0,0.08274458023670624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799387328773975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067633918387336,0.0,0.17362462675791665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31228976020488736,0.08346018182112787,0.0,0.0955990836287132,0.0,0.0,0.06898463471022029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24219256885676296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049845163002387,0.0,0.20286716256850448,0.0,0.12490302785801792,0.0896817583588068,0.0,0.08567633244781636,0.0612457048555812,0.0,0.08329171267771593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118902672560866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686757108961755
mentalhealth,Hi-its-Seabass,2020/02/29,"I can’t think properly I’ve been trying to write about my low self esteem, family life, etc since I’ve never talked about my feeling before but I couldn’t, I just couldn’t, I’m even having a hard time writing this and my brain just feels disorganized and foggy and it always does. I have a hard time remembering and understanding thing’s, I’m just struggling so much with thinking and I always feel like my way of thought isn’t normal or how anyone else thinks but I can’t explain why.",5.528605442176867,5.8471353979591845,5.951428571428572,81.48523809523812,67.46938775510205,8.574149659863947,26.537414965986393,8.344100000000001,1.5639945578231291,391,10,78,5,6,126,66,98,0.127,0.823,0.051,-0.6956,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,1,2,0,8,2,1,1,1,29,19,10,0,3,6,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,10,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,2,5,10,1,5,15,2,5,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,45,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893625440373656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215802521774765,0.1781596018710437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14795823740555006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19410648917750487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15216270028084578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452536077552482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19392106775845844,0.11484545140561556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16391766320376444,0.0,0.26375536773247044,0.12421920510310837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3115228933688116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228158925292289,0.08494850515881028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278210849046051,0.0,0.13410621787641885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17036451949339926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19697103154858653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18139373723453064,0.0,0.0,0.14383452039143566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177610265141872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975736813714434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551749323606247,0.3342439611563772,0.0,0.13804051770746414,0.20278050722642124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180524394096361,0.0,0.0,0.18101418976700587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801707097657515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689876846908676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,L4zorWolf,2020/02/29,"I need to know what this disorder, or whatever it is, is called. One of my friends is a very violent person. She gets angry very easily, and becomes a hateful person against people. She gets mad at her friends, but not even close to the degree she does at strangers and people she dislikes. She throws punches almost immediately after somebody talks bad about her or one of her friends. She can be very cruel to people, but she cared about her friends and significant other more than she cares about herself. I don’t think she’s a psychopath, because she still cares. And I know she’s not faking it, so just take my word for that. I don’t know what she is, and she refuses to go to the doctors to find out what’s wrong. If anyone can tell me what this is, I’d be grateful.",4.906078431372549,5.5926388562091525,5.261967320261436,84.58785294117645,68.93464052287581,7.950065359477126,29.679084967320264,7.908726449838941,1.8045979084967323,607,22,123,7,10,193,86,153,0.157,0.649,0.19399999999999998,0.7806,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,7,14,4,0,5,0,11,1,0,0,0,24,24,11,0,2,8,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,2,10,7,0,1,5,0,0,2,4,7,0,2,0,0,25,7,18,22,1,8,0,0,0,0,28,4,0,4,2,88,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710326750358376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957360174611355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432053432366683,0.08346374002589255,0.1512148080227721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980824807290926,0.0,0.4187900650230933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15691951033995322,0.1401410356300059,0.11981757456594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043282888614426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12514026873442494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4231290048464825,0.0,0.14306766167227924,0.0,0.07781346640065881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517785170531088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257391100610929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152271647601016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18555791155921292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28476441583793344,0.23910245432563296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934262710098187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029450472609034,0.1100492357654337,0.1196720773489987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773131362055762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3389142476088126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14969797704607615,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImmortalIguanas,2020/02/29,"I see people with two mouths Maybe this might be the wrong place to write this. Perhaps r/psychology might be the right place, but i couldnt write a text post over there. 

The tldr of what of what i have fo say here is that when i look at people while having a conversation with them if im not specifically looking at their mouth, i see two mouths talking to me in sync. 
Idk if this is something thats normal, but it freaks me out to see people talking to me like some creature out of my nightmares, to the point that i just dont look at people when i talk to them. 
To elaborate a little bit about this. It only happens with adults. I dont see this when i talk to kids, and its the worst when i look people straight in the eyes. And what i see in my peripherals is one mouth directly above the other one. May not sound like all that much, but it kinda messes with you when you see your friends that you have known since you were kids and all of the sudden they have two mouths and are looking at you like one of the aliens from the halo games (a quick google and even if youve never seen the halo franchise you will know which one kind im talking about). 

What im looking for out of this post is to know if this is something within normal human weirdness or if its a little more out-there. Regardless of what the vote says, there is a fat chance of me seeking professional help (just how i was raised) but it gotten to the point where i kinda need to know what this is. 

Thanks for your time,
—some guy who’s only opening up to strangers he will never meet—",8.81984855769231,5.395770153125002,8.096250000000001,80.85913461538463,63.09375,10.846153846153848,33.052884615384606,7.61054688173877,2.049504807692307,1219,27,271,8,13,382,148,320,0.040999999999999995,0.863,0.096,0.9612,0,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,8,4,0,16,11,0,0,19,0,24,7,7,1,4,49,44,22,0,10,14,0,0,3,1,5,1,3,0,5,28,13,1,0,4,1,1,0,7,5,0,7,4,17,31,6,42,32,7,36,0,0,14,0,32,23,0,12,14,191,59,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868021581514404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863655989344636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05251429294047786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0614276938635212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787254334196723,0.07030867360036651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05329254537196304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576468940902588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279536085091907,0.13108657442084407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165307976110405,0.1593758337040642,0.0,0.0,0.4006002395079333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987648598411072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869087517249026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844753810007584,0.05895418443501915,0.12264296277314216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155801943809551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21550675003901806,0.12093885379757975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27560422722086103,0.0,0.16613790300452158,0.0,0.15032154369844702,0.0,0.1522933974330257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789940895158743,0.0,0.12645592682142076,0.0,0.0,0.3801455560771073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576985023213251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241830612891735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195276469863455,0.0,0.07320029642734557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04636176195388387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330033281448032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692953118929853,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlindingGate,2020/02/29,"How do I deal with Alienation Heya, I'm a 19 year old male in my sophmore year of college and currently struggling to get through each day. 

Some background... My first semester of college was fantastic, I had zero problems and I was living high on life. The second semester was when I first started to experience systems of intense anxiety and depression. My class load was heavy and I was always terrified of failing my classes. I was also putting in 25-30 hours worth of work at an outaide job during this time which always left me feeling drained and tired. This culminated in a major panic attack/mental break down one night that really started to show that this was going to become a major problem. Summer came and went and my sophmore year of college began. Right off the bat I started having problems... I got ticketed for speeding, my expensive computer broke, and I started to realize that I literally had zero friends to talk with or hang out with... My life schedule essentially became get up at 7 and go to classes from 8 to 12ish and then go to work for the rest of the night and pass out. This became a day in and day out thing that completley destroyed any social life I had and sunk me even further into depression... I started having extreme panic attacks more and more often and eventually got to the point where it was hard to even get myself up and into work/school... I also developed this insane fear of talking to anyone above me about the issues I was having (bosses, professors, ect). It got to the point where the only person I would really talk about this shit with was my Mother. Well anyways this continued into the first few months of my first semester of sophmore year until I decided to go to the doctor who put me on antidepressents and some anti anxiety pills. Honestly, these antidepressents havnt done shit for me as the problems persisted... I guess I did start having less frequent panic attacks but I still felt miserable. I continued to miss shifts and classes until eventually I got fired from my job which was absolutely devestating for me seeing as I do have bills that I have to take care of myself (vehicle payments, insurance, ect)... That happened about one month ago... Since then I have felt a little better about myself which I chalk up to just not being consistently over worked and tired which brings us to today.

Im still having trouble getting up and going to class, just this week I completley missed all of my classes on Monday and Friday and I missed some of my early classes on Thursday. I struggle with getting up and I often sleep for ludicrous amounts of time. For example on Wednesday I passed out around 4 PM and slept all the way until 11 AM on Thursday... I cant tell if this is meds or just my condition... Regardless im starting to gwt slightly better but I'm still having problems with Alienation... I cant think of anyone up here at my college that I would consider a true friend and I'm generally very awkward and bad at making freinds to begin with so my question really is how do I find someone to be my friend? I know its a socially inept question but I really am lacking in human interaction which isnt helping me any... Thanks


Typing this out actually felt really good despite the fact that I feel like my problems are not valid.",7.156188296535633,7.432195187399036,7.471891491653206,72.11801853347696,64.0080775444265,10.173415903787472,35.28814395979178,9.928628108626363,3.6006865553760536,2627,112,443,51,36,858,287,619,0.14800000000000002,0.78,0.07200000000000001,-0.9896,3,0,0,0,0,0,70.0,1,0,0,11,26,40,5,8,21,0,40,11,4,4,4,92,87,45,0,11,11,1,7,1,3,2,7,0,0,3,29,44,0,0,12,2,3,13,5,28,1,9,27,8,65,12,96,56,15,110,0,8,1,0,20,42,2,11,53,329,94,23,0.0,0.0,0.057299724649780524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052049443500993074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939125873512386,0.09771518214364176,0.0,0.0,0.07985970820457877,0.0,0.08983731990868063,0.0,0.0,0.08211316033396437,0.0,0.0,0.05227094606558208,0.0,0.20039860080283792,0.0,0.0,0.049026586927926684,0.0,0.06484876907003237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386155972346796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715707756499226,0.05986631549871443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11360362075080585,0.06053507416074421,0.10114644293780524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060099759908677976,0.0,0.060088299382783414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756459454558404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057436896551788075,0.0,0.0660734136344355,0.05937857618506767,0.04194773132358564,0.16913377276810898,0.0,0.05366665139897155,0.19978000478919566,0.0,0.0,0.1360947820566122,0.0,0.15338712316749398,0.0,0.16685229373816127,0.049249379895156285,0.18784671530944988,0.0,0.06468384988456216,0.0,0.0519236140818981,0.0,0.052599268451823035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03935704398385107,0.06203817026570421,0.0,0.0,0.0578248237300884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12684976322345273,0.0612857235352924,0.11653594360314005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032269554394923856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379664064013106,0.0,0.12442153508725552,0.028686361885701964,0.05885027308485208,0.05184855111556506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03919432888657359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522180855187998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373535714776114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020462827539686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06161404723559736,0.0,0.07957687684931465,0.044657238222027086,0.0,0.2066766970854917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051269779882622,0.0,0.0,0.11101386818300976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33710780363039017,0.0,0.11805443512637827,0.1315538805399385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880793904180413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050144349569593134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05942515636653749,0.046790175706461185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054516056980115,0.04857165050628523,0.0,0.058759817654969515,0.11971001546033087,0.04975107318617912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909234081930425,0.0,0.1406754047523126,0.0,0.0,0.1227683772205918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04414818683445703,0.14158449631622255,0.05132160672364554,0.05405910462737307,0.0,0.0,0.03900923987895665,0.0376237471156486,0.0,0.0,0.0684771910086992,0.13497405630278902,0.05565724153756108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062981772373679,0.0,0.0,0.04844801481439101,0.0,0.0466071490844595,0.047099566641508696,0.0,0.05279400564273857,0.05443162978351995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17098790289691804,0.0,0.0,0.08342233051170883,0.0,0.0,0.1512483544612654
mentalhealth,erinrachel32,2020/02/29,"Psych Tech Job Advice? Psych Tech Job Advice

Hello! I recently started working at a psychiatric unit in a hospital. I have a degree in psych so I am hoping to put it to good use. 

The first week or two were ok, but I did not realize how DRAINING it is! I recently had a patient tell me “you’re a terrible tech, you don’t belong in this profession.”  That really killed my ego- I spend 12.5 hours a day three days a week with these patients and I try SO hard to be a good employee and emphatic and try and understand where they’re coming from. Thing is, I’ve been in a psych ward before and I know how much it sucks.  I get called awful names, my coworkers aren’t too friendly towards me (I’ll say hi and they blatantly ignore me) and I just feel like a punching bag. I knew this would be a challenging job, but didn’t know how challenging it would be for me. I love the schedule (three days in a row, four days off) but that’s it. When I ask my coworkers for advice on how to handle difficult patients I usually get “Eh, you’ll get use to it. Don’t take it personally”. The thing is I don’t want to have to get used to a patient calling me a c*** or a b****. Any other hospital unit would not allow this!! 

I’m trying to get through each shift but I end up crying after most shifts. I feel like it’s wrecking havoc on my mental health. I find out if I get into nursing school in a few weeks, and depending on that decision I may switch jobs. (I applied back home but I am across the country now.) All I have to pay for is rent, and that’s about 25% of my monthly income. I have been trying to calculate how much longer I have to work until I can finish paying rent until beginning of August.

I do think I’m making a difference in their lives, I’m energetic, bubbly, and show a great deal of empathy. But I just feel attacked everyday. I keep wondering if the job is worth it? I of course wouldn’t leave this job until I have a new one lined up. 

Any tips on how to get through the day being constantly scrutinized and degraded by patients? I know they’re mentally ill, but some of them are just SO mean. I need help not taking things personally. Thank you! 

*Sorry this was long*",0.473015279853847,2.80474782286996,2.68537120079721,90.52046171732272,87.58744394618833,6.353031057963793,20.366882577644912,7.662118739084242,0.9119571167580136,1683,54,360,34,54,569,221,446,0.122,0.765,0.113,-0.7852,11,0,0,0,0,0,61.0,0,3,3,5,18,19,3,0,25,2,37,3,0,12,2,74,75,35,1,9,17,0,4,2,1,6,2,1,3,2,23,16,0,2,14,1,6,2,9,7,0,6,8,5,49,12,50,57,7,53,0,0,0,1,20,20,1,10,33,238,72,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22469347351552785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10424415116167207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165389351230429,0.08719616981804791,0.0,0.058936232071221985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522031006955717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15652877342724794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602395419272232,0.0,0.08282736283088975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419230218289846,0.24715243936952924,0.0790189140840592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007901373132029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788582413067264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626393479445793,0.10951218689111997,0.0,0.0,0.07005328026548427,0.06519525767917354,0.0,0.0,0.059216699517946565,0.0,0.28031150048621484,0.0,0.0,0.12857446934961198,0.0,0.08450275678229531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865998154462116,0.0,0.0,0.08147137534086674,0.0,0.0,0.0513743630494998,0.0,0.07688243407478694,0.07612701644436529,0.07548111308364093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4563574345756489,0.06812670511278836,0.08479771509510865,0.0,0.12636831696079392,0.0,0.0,0.08115730765271473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489096847263685,0.0,0.06768003942812746,0.06782951577907073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691762294697282,0.0,0.051161964362123835,0.0,0.0,0.08349023149345525,0.0,0.0,0.1544827771246962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117830229652835,0.0,0.1126876196565562,0.05683222021602381,0.0,0.07402542198426389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05193747989914456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13384909121927568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705064704903586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04910154781659799,0.0,0.15135784247422573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060952171161470524,0.0,0.07757009288351191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579919725842104,0.05425060740348506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152568764738114,0.0,0.0669921973099928,0.07056556555408777,0.0,0.0,0.1527610802769273,0.04911181958673027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20815107932544927,0.0,0.07487224519116592,0.07979144514431027,0.0,0.1985932424745594,0.0844150114512236,0.0,0.045207941717076885,0.0,0.1844429858940496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311958425961065,0.11159875985736237,0.0,0.0,0.16334188217625378,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idk-quarter,2020/02/29,"I need advice I am a teenager and I have had problems with mental health in the past. I used to go to therapy but I stopped nearly a year ago. I want to go back because I feel like I am more ready to confront certain things but I don’t know how to ask my mom. I also don’t know if it is worth it because maybe these feelings will go away with time even though I know they won’t because they never have before, I still can’t help but wonder. Any advice is useful thank you",1.984117647058824,3.149850696078431,3.380539215686277,93.53492647058826,76.35294117647058,5.492156862745098,22.553921568627448,5.148860815047168,0.025133333333332786,369,10,84,1,8,121,67,102,0.064,0.7040000000000001,0.23199999999999998,0.9545,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,2,0,6,5,1,0,3,0,12,1,0,3,2,22,27,8,0,4,4,1,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,6,0,1,3,5,2,0,0,1,2,16,3,10,24,1,14,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,2,9,58,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167693948393039,0.14367595243522865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296169519380968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022134787352128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152483156706362,0.0,0.15228141564680034,0.1246310870218907,0.0,0.2964111286877905,0.0,0.13791988144153405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705366135544277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16390710281992946,0.11579144453865778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763448821700713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17228563335420147,0.0,0.0,0.10864017747484853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672281575265629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918509956309587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628331983922537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16334057813489403,0.0,0.0,0.18982853087082327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018178180836085,0.12500766428699306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472565085603507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155090626342048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943892961836168,0.1355078462433373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922336960212285,0.1853549427753938,0.0,0.10768010792039427,0.0,0.15924478518385127,0.0,0.09451134321999254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799736915077506,0.0,0.0,0.09560018888572208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17577106263875414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437552219491432
mentalhealth,crazylife90s,2020/02/29,"I feel burned out I am a FT grad student and FT nught shift nurse. 

The last few yearsn honestly, I feel so burned out on life. Friends who get married and ask me to be in their wedding, I feel obligated to say yes and DREAD the whole thing because i am giving up my precious time and money for someone else when I already feel so chronically depleted of self care. 

My life has been non stop busy for 8 years and I wish I could be a better friend (I am known to flake bc I'm tired or need to study more) but I cannot slow down, at least til this summer when I get a new job allowing me to work 2-3 fewer shifts a month and be paid more (yay!)

I also haven't been exercising like I used to. In high school i worked out 5 days a week and was in really good shape. I feel better mentally when i work out too. I am thinking of getting that nordic track treadmill with the I fit trainer on the screen with those scenic runs and trainer controlled resistance, and getting some dumbbells for cheap. If i have all that in my apartment (it's 2 levels so dont have to work about neighbors) I am 99.9% sure I will use them regularly. 

Also I think i need to go on more chill vacations by myself or with s /o

Any of you experience this burn out feeling? What did you do to solve it?",3.4736394129979016,4.089165422641511,4.489779874213838,89.09496331236899,72.13207547169812,7.70020964360587,26.042976939203356,7.793537801064563,1.154668763102725,987,30,225,12,18,322,164,265,0.039,0.816,0.145,0.975,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,2,7,10,12,0,1,9,2,21,5,0,4,2,42,44,22,0,5,4,0,6,1,3,1,5,1,1,1,10,17,0,2,9,1,3,2,3,1,0,0,5,8,33,11,36,34,8,36,0,0,1,0,13,20,0,4,15,139,43,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483929492147045,0.1954300056096665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309313832466422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423080947505045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448566420268837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21613359584558772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458047109261675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13704605981534912,0.09755847673430317,0.0,0.0,0.07880220272487112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320533610423988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102073756666716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11952490429569383,0.0,0.0,0.3706964892855357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888068097573595,0.0,0.25535615351718755,0.11721542694347305,0.06944318247622965,0.10248686422817474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12910005255946255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12125435340691353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960085671930766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726122982082158,0.059695681083476386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313840753034302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975305967489642,0.0,0.0,0.1812041244744344,0.0,0.11801150587221908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827780569390456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971700979492621,0.0,0.1236624287501814,0.0,0.0,0.12747043244903294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353087680885498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215600180189703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11516228003124128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117736060088199,0.1565883619491377,0.0,0.0,0.07124975575911333,0.14043900463394918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21106521671659875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801315066037852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364203580279942,0.14051204402741535,0.0,0.0,0.35582202306226945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868611544655756
mentalhealth,rakarakarakarakaraka,2020/02/29,"I’m not sure if this is actually a mental health issue but I feel like my friend needs help. I have a friend who for years is obsessed with pregnancy. She constantly would message me and ask me about symptoms of pregnancy, or really google-able questions. I answered them and moved on. 

Recently I’ve grown a little more concerned because she’s been buying things like baby clothes, diapers, baby wipes .... and wearing maternity clothes, and she is not pregnant and doesn’t have a baby. She’s been eating really weird stuff like the cliche “pickles and ice cream” and claims she has mysterious cravings but denies being pregnant. On Instagram, she even posted someone else’s pregnancy tests and multiple images of an ultrasound with no caption.... it wasn’t until people started congratulating her that she responded it wasn’t hers. 

We’re friends but not super close, so I messaged her privately and asked if she had ‘baby fever’, she said yes but that she and her boyfriend aren’t actively trying to get pregnant. I’m wondering if this is a psychological issue and maybe she needs to get some professional help. 

I tried googling if there are mental disorders tied to this but I couldn’t find anything. What are your thoughts? What would you do?",6.141913725490196,8.122516404444442,6.0393202614379105,75.33717647058825,67.17777777777778,9.205228758169936,32.79084967320261,9.627879704456738,3.35376339869281,1001,44,166,22,17,314,138,225,0.07,0.778,0.152,0.971,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,1,1,4,10,0,1,7,1,21,5,1,0,1,40,34,23,0,9,13,0,1,3,3,2,3,1,0,0,12,14,1,0,6,0,1,2,9,2,0,0,7,3,27,8,12,23,2,12,0,0,1,0,31,4,0,8,8,109,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.132479438932525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117166040733568,0.0,0.2538293025630373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275632590891535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670529897227547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558950671431654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13891350212064305,0.113407716288488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966634682132911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686429167477691,0.09698496710423923,0.0,0.0,0.12407961661558163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3146570158705521,0.0,0.1418550622426528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14430354979993187,0.0,0.0,0.1819903720966055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833904811289692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19897232408329146,0.13606437390335596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13638634920284107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736226438890533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14428841351268734,0.0,0.20132447957018712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411694546252514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001786588182834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15207912769083634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17393907052535107,0.0,0.13404385201371338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913618035763866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502663062136098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608964123131096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15540950844342213,0.0,0.0,0.12794954949646806,0.14110370591841653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019104793147116,0.0,0.0,0.10777604846044496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18434044789153545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472228867669531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19287603227037808,0.0,0.0,0.08742318248894435
mentalhealth,Bazpingo,2020/02/29,"How to break the cycle with my mentally ill mother? My mother (mid 50s) has struggled with depression, borderline personality disorder, abuse of prescription medication and a litany of other emotional/behavioural issues for all of her life. My family moved countries when I was a preteen and left pretty much our entire extended family/support system behind. Her and my father have a toxic marriage - for most of my teen years, he would work overseas. When he was home there was constant tension in the house and practically daily sobbing fits or massive screaming arguments. 

After I moved out, did school and started living on my own things got steadily worse. She was in the house pretty much alone (save for the few weeks a year my dad would be home from work). She has made two attempts on her life and been in and out of inpatient mental health care. 

My father retired in the past two years and moved back home. Since then, she has moved to a women's shelter, claiming emotional abuse from my father. The shelter set her up with an apartment and me and my brother helped her move in, thinking any step for her would be a good step as it would be changing her status quo. I remember having to move a mattress foam cover and seeing the yellow stain on it from what I know is likely her soiling herself after overdosing on pills or making an attempt at her life. 

Things almost seemed like they could get somewhat better, then her sister passed. She would visit this sister in the US from time to time and I'm pretty sure would 'swap' medications with her (pretty much confirmed this once when I had to call the ambulance for her and told them to check her purse for medications as she had just come back from her sisters', sure enough they found some unmarked pills in a ziploc baggie). Since her sister passed, we have had to call for a welfare check for her twice in two weeks. I saw her once for dinner and she was extremely out of it - asking illogical questions, staring into space, lack of social/situational awareness, unable to answer simple questions. She called me a few days after saying (as she usually does) that she was afraid, confused, not sure what to do - also told me that her gynaecologist took 'bloody fluid' from her and was testing it. 

 Tonight she called me in a panic saying she was discharged from the hospital but is scared, confused and doesn't think she can stay by herself. I live an hour and a half away. She also said that she has a gash on her head she doesn't know how she got and that there was blood around the apartment. I called my father and he said he would go check on her and try to take her to the hospital. 

This has been the entirety of my 20s. It has absolutely ruined me. I love my mother and we have good memories and I do believe she did her best with the broken toolbox she was given but being a mother became her only source of identity and after empty nesting she has no idea how to be an autonomous adult.

I need to make a change for my own mental health but I don't know what to do. I've been so close to going no contact but I just don't have the coping skills to deal with the guilt yet. No contact could legitimately mean me finding out she died in a ditch or in the street. Her psychologist when she was at the shelter considered her a strong candidate for long term care, but the long term care facility did not accept her for some reason. 

I'm already doing the painstaking work of trying to reparent myself emotionally and dealing with the dysfunction of my childhood with therapy. Almost 30 and never been in a real relationship because I am so afraid of perpetuating even a modicum of the toxicity that I experienced as a kid. I'm doing the work and trying really hard and I'm proud of myself - I'm healthier and I no longer smoke and slowly but surely I'm gaining healthy habits and becoming the guy I want to be - but the continuation of our relationship, even with this level of distance, is a cycle of waiting for the next crisis scenario when I debate calling 911 or not. 

Please help me.",7.674958188153312,7.235145731168835,7.656727906240102,73.61773994298386,63.116883116883116,10.109597719353818,32.936331960722214,9.437772892022268,2.902980677858726,3223,109,578,50,41,1039,341,770,0.107,0.812,0.081,-0.9374,1,2,1,0,2,0,67.0,5,0,3,12,22,31,0,9,51,0,62,15,2,7,6,116,103,59,1,12,16,14,1,2,0,7,11,5,4,5,20,49,1,1,16,0,3,15,12,13,0,5,32,11,100,18,102,56,17,92,0,3,4,1,107,37,1,15,38,427,120,6,0.0,0.12506225043148952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056954110075954,0.05466019023063834,0.05823981017277718,0.08441015977872361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035889601807152394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046981975831194435,0.04933858979004712,0.0,0.049584944075122116,0.08116322604112819,0.0,0.032171860185743605,0.058287127562381975,0.0,0.059460664958155024,0.055385328882765233,0.0466762289187944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32334218968045536,0.0,0.16142645195292815,0.0,0.11166036888821074,0.04546199281790892,0.0,0.05703228502723196,0.0,0.08427494624708845,0.0,0.0,0.0340362602056474,0.1088198169434826,0.04545603337227769,0.0,0.054773326736826604,0.0,0.06048605712500045,0.0,0.046184777431906215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873216375004728,0.0,0.05453188615298263,0.0,0.06971631815741165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049752671175335335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04823645846784888,0.0,0.0,0.0578663405997792,0.0,0.0,0.0275733678301137,0.0,0.059987821318178036,0.08853228610144075,0.08441984030253613,0.0,0.0,0.05225670056709002,0.0,0.0,0.04727707732784344,0.0,0.05416357096547116,0.11219719042577164,0.0,0.0,0.07074950152677924,0.0,0.1588163890727674,0.0,0.05197389133767611,0.12179321653411725,0.0,0.05957786607477704,0.0,0.055084604329139336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701319980492937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057341457430394725,0.0,0.11183209783529396,0.05156753654728168,0.0,0.09320464077071228,0.09341049008331764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04763254921301665,0.04993808316817115,0.0704569995790215,0.0,0.0,0.05748871528417788,0.0,0.159499300978246,0.15955788296850534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.336556265515856,0.11638966080113185,0.03913285744360172,0.0407042318086201,0.0,0.056128049952525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124097860788808,0.0,0.04013865148342241,0.0,0.0619214580834182,0.0,0.0,0.050380821008900095,0.0,0.04608211139499646,0.0,0.05793238051930441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147693317298731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824276584304833,0.0,0.0,0.06007082966733705,0.033809762554822036,0.054262687228913684,0.0,0.11332370004330355,0.05978510657220235,0.0,0.10040443660970574,0.08393944899120175,0.052838147799005065,0.053412296319923586,0.04205577035893315,0.04804543826143457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731397772308921,0.0,0.0,0.05379865371149704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037355241053046384,0.05625236953972197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517310633880694,0.0,0.0,0.05988976634137775,0.198963642816134,0.0,0.03968110782317096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06035414388898525,0.0,0.07012427756279595,0.06763367073741483,0.0,0.0,0.0615484121699714,0.0,0.0,0.10085977419798847,0.058636260932926815,0.10749465465645323,0.0,0.15466393287529115,0.0,0.06348322804593795,0.0,0.058125489320393436,0.0,0.0311287493574679,0.0,0.08466771191915105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536867060192584,0.0,0.05378342068215961,0.2624347125529266,0.0,0.0,0.10195835930860488
mentalhealth,pastelpinkbooknerd,2020/02/29,"""Wow, you have a lot of problems."" That's what my new doctor told me today after I discussed with him about my medical background. I have 3 diagnosed mental health disorders, 2 possibly undiagnosed mental health disorders, along with several physical and chronic health issues and a learning disability. The whole reason I went to see him was to be tested for another health issue. 

While I explained my health issues, he questioned me about every one. Not in a ""how do they effect you daily? Do you have any control or stability with them?"" But instead ""well how do you know you have it? Who diagnosed you? Did you get second opinions?"" Then with my mental health medication he started asking me about my psychiatrist, if he was credible, was this medication actually helping, shit like that. Oh and when he learned I was on birth control (mind you he had NO IDEA what Nuvaring was, asked if it was the arm implant amd then asked me to spell it) and saw on my paperwork that my emergency contact was my bf who I lived with, he asked why I was still on birth control. ""You're 27. Only a couple good years left to have babies.""

What pissed me off the most was before they let me see him (and by this point it was 2 hours after my appointment time) they had me fill out extensive medical background paperwork. Normal for a doctor's office. But then why ignore my paperwork I filled out for you and instead ask me yourself details about my medical background?! Oh, but not to ignore the sheet that says my emergency contact bf lives with me.

Needless to say, once I get the blood test results back, I plan on seeing a new doctor.",4.750405701754385,6.639967088815794,5.536184210526319,77.93162280701758,70.54605263157895,8.619298245614036,29.771929824561404,9.188382445141503,2.7597745614035096,1281,52,225,27,24,417,155,304,0.066,0.9109999999999999,0.023,-0.9129999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,9,4,5,12,9,2,0,11,0,23,21,4,8,0,45,39,19,0,4,8,0,0,1,2,0,17,2,0,0,15,15,0,5,8,0,0,3,3,5,1,2,16,6,47,4,32,21,3,31,0,0,4,0,40,10,2,7,19,160,62,7,0.0,0.0,0.07125651858041555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04965577772220524,0.07656733368088345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413169726577181,0.0,0.0,0.05614750385322168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06213423359867065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456928028391152,0.0,0.08079471031318043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482265520282438,0.0,0.0,0.16737339266288934,0.22421571926145173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061522095124345026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629937113160552,0.0,0.0,0.06124530920562792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4656980129320714,0.0,0.0,0.04894344524422175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190951879291589,0.0,0.0,0.08243015040592809,0.0,0.22864022425054534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040129618708951854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933592241370402,0.07466740668874862,0.0,0.035673649240143,0.0,0.12895514833675692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062078584921499924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3677974230892933,0.22075950614004247,0.0,0.07372889993628436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104541535926654,0.0,0.0,0.07154362634176041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776340597656277,0.04947991668757826,0.05553463554261784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902704863954992,0.082318537707568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986981938630771,0.0,0.0,0.08179857399241272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507622821024189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161361065978962,0.0,0.0,0.17456131133194533,0.0,0.0,0.08249127371263115,0.07495348822722582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05168359226877255,0.0,0.05831348320204675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04257826947048627,0.0,0.06921396725718974,0.06977328079032957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06565331800474496,0.06768982683141997,0.1317775191479308,0.08152368669184105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04702217700782492
mentalhealth,E________,2020/02/29,"Should I work graveyard shift or not? Hi, I badly need an advice.

SHORT VERSION:

I don't want to work on graveyard shift, fearing it will trigger my depression.
I have 3 options:
1. Ask for doctor's certificate to work on morning.
2. Submit resignation letter.
3. Face graveyard shift head-on and gamble my health and life there.

LONG VERSION:

Since January this year, I have been working on a morning shift (6AM-4pm). I requested this to my leads because I was already burnt out because I used to work on the busiest mid shift (12noon-10pm) for 3 years. So far, morning shift is the best — I can eat healthy foods on time, sleep 4-8 hrs, get to do my hobbies after shift.

However, I heard that I will be transferred to graveyard shift (9pm-7pm). It's not yet final, but it has high chances of getting implemented because people working on graveyard are now getting sick so we will swap. The problem is that I have worked graveyard last 2018, Apr-May. In a way, it contributed to me getting antidepressants months later on September of that same year. That was my 3rd time to take antidepressants. 1st was in 2012, I was in college. 2nd was in 2014, I was in my previous work.

The reason for my depression is not quite clear, too much overprotective parents, very low self esteem, me not talking to people, fucked up sleep, unhealthy diet, my inability to prioritize important tasks, etc. Currently, things are working well (not totally but at least I have made small effective efforts) and I'm afraid working on graveyard might trigger my illness. I did not want to live in constant fear of depression but wouldn't diabetics avoid sugar? Wouldn't people with gallstones and high blood pressure avoid fatty foods? Why would I not avoid a graveyard shift that will fuck up my sleep and other daily routines.

I have 3 options.
1. Visit my psychiatrist and request for a medical certificate, which I don't know is something he would issue because there are worst depression cases than me. But I will still try to talk to him later today.
2. Submit a resignation letter. I already submitted a resignation letter last year but I retracted it after all 4 of my leads talked to me worrying because they know I don't have a backup job waiting for me and I have a mortgage with 13 more years of terms. Some of them also want me to stay because they saw my potential in our work. BUT, recently, I bought a laptop which will enable me to find an online job that pays better and requires less hours of work. But it's a huge gamble because only heaven knows how fast I can find a job.
3. Face graveyard shift straight to it's face and:
3.a. I'll be OK and manage to sleep well on daytime.
3.b. I'll get screwed and be depressed again and be on antidepressants and get well, then decide again what to do with my career when that happens.
3.c. I'll get screwed really screwed that no amount of antidepressants can help me and that I'll eventually you know... cross the line... to the point of no return.

PS. I'm single and feeds nobody but myself. I have no savings. But when things get worse I can always sell my house, which is on mortgage, yes I can. I can also go home to my parents when things get fucked up but that's not my goal here. :(",3.605389876081365,5.93067531260229,4.211823415945759,84.29908653846154,74.92471358428806,6.786544306757076,28.095657002571894,7.772667728589733,1.8452452419920504,2540,105,468,37,56,805,277,611,0.162,0.764,0.07400000000000001,-0.9929,9,3,1,0,0,0,101.0,2,1,3,22,20,33,6,7,19,2,52,27,8,9,3,79,84,35,0,10,19,2,0,0,0,12,7,1,1,1,27,20,6,5,9,0,5,5,16,25,3,0,12,3,63,8,64,56,16,73,1,9,1,6,24,33,6,5,33,295,90,28,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05764825680414474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13020269822511293,0.09435496551412123,0.0490877362737669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055151429050234936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049257528190107716,0.2517353759803307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191056633965535,0.052175401415034135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06375155906638158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540572410059037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060382861696499576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060365592774094035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579390752678255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276930900776007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462504650694895,0.10783889965824783,0.0,0.14267156480810575,0.0,0.0,0.16361701502615894,0.2773973843652057,0.0,0.033527651331200586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216820188056952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060544866683890176,0.06270786633479025,0.0,0.0,0.039542436563324485,0.12466080599157298,0.059175794925321976,0.0,0.058097209360302764,0.0680711585907171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061574411841654124,0.17562733468366373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296862445372268,0.09617597227825447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041669208865703015,0.0,0.0,0.052092785327799526,0.05220783608023798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0558215519023551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059430251377244864,0.0,0.06258331426808876,0.0,0.0,0.04708845023112971,0.0,0.0433673800242356,0.04374330559543334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04486759753126629,0.0,0.0,0.1310117173681661,0.0,0.0,0.12269704059433105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055768401230503084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564492934035981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274738373549761,0.0,0.0,0.03779306884696789,0.06065566035663673,0.05824946071479325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154361107588135,0.0,0.0,0.04880044877630611,0.0,0.2361464304125608,0.0,0.0,0.04541646557230338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628797576254076,0.047112686873543086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04435614824130638,0.14225143448861874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757898234913745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879975494620946,0.0,0.05591941670445767,0.0,0.0,0.04005305546018948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050951877073323236,0.0,0.04867623069464083,0.10438857407050936,0.04682669350944769,0.0,0.0,0.15912808034376516,0.0,0.05323291163278412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5153800401908903,0.05991127352088482,0.06011992889244334,0.0838152939935596,0.0,0.0,0.1899510181724333
mentalhealth,loseruser123,2020/02/29,Hard time accepting someone could love me This might seem stupid but I am having a hard time accepting someone (my girlfriend) could love me for me. This is probably due to me never being in a serious relationship before and me struggling with anxiety and depression. Any tips would be appreciated as it’s an annoying feeling. Cheers.,4.418353510895886,7.696291949152544,5.497142857142858,70.66305084745764,78.66101694915254,9.473123486682807,32.157384987893465,9.606745405546679,4.291206295399515,271,14,41,9,7,89,46,59,0.22899999999999998,0.473,0.299,0.7865,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,10,2,1,3,0,9,2,0,0,1,13,13,4,0,3,1,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,7,5,5,7,0,5,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,2,4,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14342555134541154,0.0,0.1613450315431765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17946827378617006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3367878165671023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18165586465478925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664207544600776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3778665986979146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807077420124999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237414297132332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16266624858677933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273958894179746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226437649636638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200389877005816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3574055183609871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22048818592647046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459658091874829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498239101689452,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway1990959,2020/02/29,Remembering that I exist/I can see I really don't know how can I explain this thing and if this is the right subreddit but uhhh during a day sometimes I remember that I exist or I can see and it's such a surreal moment that I feel like my brain is going to explode (I don't feel pain during this moment). Imagine manual breathing (I'm sorry) but this is much worse. What the heck is my problem or what should I do?,0.9981609195402292,3.1034035287356336,3.7777011494252872,85.1957471264368,82.67816091954023,6.625287356321839,21.160919540229887,7.793537801064563,1.0858643678160915,325,10,66,6,9,115,52,87,0.09300000000000001,0.8240000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.2256,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,11,3,2,1,0,17,19,8,0,3,5,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,11,2,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,4,11,1,1,18,1,5,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,3,4,48,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25495948037179994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472930643612826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23096233339850974,0.16316231425073294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979966031705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12551751927416574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158012710149744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16789339463059338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24302373684608425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218538991489272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14631288813571822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5174441314633288,0.19504435315605054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639955302265464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22588417652541265,0.2556646156551965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15173258850911533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327495675565685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Free_Maintenance,2020/02/29,"How can I stop my anxiety ? I usually have two weeks of feeling great ,feeling I can be manager or something with great people skills compared to workmstes around me, to bring completely socially inept. I'm in the socially inept stage feeling really suicidal. Went for an interview, though it ok t seemed positive at the end I am cycling thoughts constantly, since I did some awkward stuff ( no not my imagination) . I'm lost I keep losing my confidence when I realise people realise I am weird. I don't know what to do it's a never ending cycle please help",4.455854700854702,6.7411991153846165,5.8224358974358985,73.9003418803419,72.26923076923076,9.622222222222225,33.67094017094017,9.994966539143718,4.048915811965813,444,23,73,13,9,149,77,104,0.18100000000000002,0.609,0.21,0.6646,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,4,7,0,1,4,1,9,0,0,1,1,16,21,4,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,7,0,0,2,4,4,0,1,4,3,13,3,9,16,1,14,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,3,8,48,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611177572527454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675375075461602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17284479812813958,0.17814707861425064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920209176016384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500632595790677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635011122194569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049721227539873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14652855139475174,0.0,0.0,0.09059866903295632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844278741110464,0.17995606949056814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714447580840454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285760500772939,0.0,0.0,0.1809586331979395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560878675836144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15007560126565256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636776122621586,0.0,0.0,0.33609289852253604,0.0,0.12691157331957872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378241420380468,0.0,0.0,0.1887167683241248,0.18032197050577725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619668270174171,0.13087453767736512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610370207890006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18156183134706305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223479932592308,0.0,0.0,0.1528199971815312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rayjayraynw,2020/02/29,"Drinking and my mental health Over the last few months I've started opening up more about my feelings and mental health, I managed to keep a lid over everything, but near the end of my first semester if my masters year I just broke down and cried into my partners arms. I've found these episodes happen more and more. I'm not going to lie, I like to drink, not in clubs on the weekends, but at home, mostly alone. Something weird though, as I've started opening up more, and having the depressive episodes, I've started drinking less. Is that normal?",5.6725714285714295,6.698090542857145,5.094285714285718,85.25571428571429,67.3809523809524,7.142857142857142,32.14285714285714,6.868970318607317,1.8867142857142856,437,18,81,3,7,132,68,105,0.139,0.831,0.03,-0.8957,0,1,4,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,5,0,2,6,1,0,0,19,11,10,0,2,6,0,1,1,1,0,2,0,1,1,2,8,3,1,2,5,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,1,8,1,16,10,7,22,0,2,0,0,1,12,0,2,10,53,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17286540746409834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833395997059713,0.0,0.0,0.1437568310217107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4905162145278011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14783014003809494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000532919226847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843932390998205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14197108447825832,0.0,0.18300500792311844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09485714494676094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759538741659506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3548288609578729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674214188498023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483546894528614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136051554173499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815423727904352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33640617711082915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322364590256736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16353350930452895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849323130942056,0.0,0.0,0.3544130895798604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639853673234012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748269293053464
mentalhealth,inkstains-,2020/02/29,ED WARNING it’s ruining everything I have been recovering from bulimia for a while now but lately to just been getting worse. It’s sucking all the joy and energy out of me. It’s bringing back night terrors. It’s making me hate myself so fucking much I don’t even talk normal anymore! My boyfriend is worried sick about me but I’m scared to tell him. I’m scared he’ll be disappointed in me. It’s starting to hurt our relationship and my health. I’ve been having horrible sharp pains in my torso and chest for weeks. I’m scared he’ll take me to a doctor. I am scared that he will think I’m lying cus he has seen me eat. But he doesn’t know that while he was playing games online I was shitting it out and purging. I don’t know what to do anymore today it has gotten horrible! Please help me.,1.730853658536585,3.8281590975609774,3.4453048780487805,88.61783536585371,79.97560975609757,6.295121951219512,23.664634146341466,7.413659706084162,1.0285560975609758,628,22,131,9,16,209,99,164,0.344,0.5760000000000001,0.08,-0.9957,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,0,0,6,15,4,5,3,0,17,8,2,1,1,16,36,10,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,10,6,1,0,3,2,0,1,3,13,0,0,7,2,18,2,14,25,2,14,0,3,1,1,13,4,3,0,9,78,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29541933071663096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452660211999985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244764656581408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524040479932144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837426899269933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338587618670793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376937549169261,0.07781563845152302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14704861618622814,0.0,0.15831754864404834,0.0,0.0,0.0998321580692203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944465305079067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16370839519854175,0.0,0.1680121799635505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941941875581252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948893173778268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977124240407124,0.1459307692410371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584839558027092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16349272982906632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599071271396844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5964645640544607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15288601869365265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542135984124218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198525906405538,0.11971330826396916,0.13018118832561784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543551773723104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411788582789515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194716601144184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125703543045446,0.1517838243146463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uhoh_a_throwaway,2020/02/29,"Everything is fine... right? I don't really know how to explain this but I feel like there is nothing wrong with me? Sure, I have days where I'm sad or feel nervous because of situations and have ridiculously high expectations of myself, but I don't feel like it's negatively impacting my life. I do daily tasks, have a good education record and try to take care of myself. Yet my partner has expressed their concern for my wellbeing multiple times in the past year? Apparently I say concerning things on my lower days and it's causing them to worry about me. I don't want to go talk to anyone about it because it's not even slightly serious, it'd be unfair of me to take up resources from people who truly need them. 

Anyways I don't really know what I want out of this but if someone could share their thoughts, it'd be very appreciated.",4.616686991869916,6.01976282317073,5.785121951219512,77.92796747967479,70.15853658536585,9.12520325203252,30.13008130081301,9.516144504307137,2.782932520325204,669,27,127,15,12,223,104,164,0.127,0.687,0.18600000000000005,0.9127,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,4,0,8,12,1,1,2,0,16,1,0,2,1,26,31,9,0,6,6,0,3,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,11,5,0,0,7,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,1,4,22,7,20,25,0,14,0,1,0,0,11,7,0,2,8,85,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118204951566868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061048205051013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17235958024831574,0.1736627695239276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349741091209128,0.0,0.0,0.21804885573444305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165712176068993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193286034620376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25643301366744403,0.24154128421207444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607603565579624,0.14179263205869524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17861251184900367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185812900091662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194062881763673,0.1651803439808167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534977015160784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622097646863507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137907492741682,0.11719923484998752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165978281159383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14436931639505166,0.0,0.13443677928277736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19002130998135275,0.0,0.0,0.14323704440199286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15932932403078792,0.0,0.2542118347562124,0.13587743598071367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231050642305207,0.0,0.0,0.1342082486065037,0.09857546602393286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147750776367594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13948544231775778,0.19942226721823966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168031229256325,0.0,0.0,0.18483160878895905,0.0,0.10886381878951608
mentalhealth,AcquaSerene,2020/02/29,I just found out I am a rainbow baby. Through the mess of my parents divorce I have just learned at 15 that I was born after my mom had 2 miscarriages. I am feeling a little bit disoriented and asking myself questions like “am I only alive because of the horrible circumstances of others?”. Does anyone have any word of advice on how to take this news?,4.625588235294117,6.061875088235299,5.678705882352944,78.57217647058825,70.17647058823529,7.792941176470588,31.24705882352941,8.238735603445708,2.469655294117647,278,12,49,4,5,92,53,68,0.126,0.777,0.09699999999999999,-0.4555,1,0,0,0,1,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,1,0,11,11,2,0,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,9,1,10,8,1,6,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,3,37,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729842921731778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899722455629952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19533281312469272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611609553566792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17029335004230745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049853402670797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444670722932859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412512230487205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063003798515923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364796518038633,0.2799889651809131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3271793801944418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124634816833376,0.0,0.0,0.3101927353471156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3129436190109349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21004159366551745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Beyond___,2020/02/29,"Am I a bad person? I like to think of myself as someone with a lot of empathy, but apart from my family members, I just don't feel sorry or concerned for other people in my life.
Like with friends I've had for a while, if they're feeling sad or something, I feel as though I'm only asking if they're okay because I have to. It sounds horrible but I don't actually care, it's not like I want them to feel sad I just don't know how to deal with them or care.
It makes me feel fake and like a terrible person, especially when I'm so emotional myself, it just makes no sense.

Thanks for listening, are there any suggestions as to what is wrong with mw? Am I a bad person?",3.706776212832551,3.8557945915492944,5.354882629107983,84.77266823161192,71.39436619718309,8.846322378716746,26.341158059467922,8.841846274778883,1.6652275430359935,520,15,117,9,9,178,83,142,0.261,0.575,0.16399999999999998,-0.9659,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,0,8,16,0,0,5,1,9,1,0,3,0,28,26,16,0,3,11,0,5,4,1,0,1,2,0,3,6,5,0,0,7,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,1,7,16,9,19,25,1,4,0,2,0,0,10,2,0,6,6,75,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.1520540452678764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105960297022692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14566702792986366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601998845066699,0.09498405358107227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31772981467188816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063956612341784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17527214992107665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688955992708305,0.0,0.3939265313389647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203831390001694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563245835351055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005752554710684,0.3044955203815917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246928351076914,0.0,0.0,0.20801692486967036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850517194721732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802327063841148,0.4081578478148651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202248319016466,0.11995485290091908,0.0,0.17442337674583086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434545382616064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984067082409406,0.15308853559619054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190437791942556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17036045435193248,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vicodder,2020/02/29,"How do I stop intrusive conversations? I have conversations with impressions of people in my head. They are the impressions of people I used to know. They react to things that I am doing at the moment and I cant help but mentally respond. The conversations usually turn into conversations about how much of a brat I am, how stupid and inherently inferior I am and some are about racial identity issues. how can i stop engaging in these convos?",5.114603174603175,7.557169419753087,6.6956966490299825,67.6677777777778,70.85185185185185,11.048324514991183,28.855379188712522,10.914260884657429,4.025174955908288,357,14,59,13,7,122,52,81,0.174,0.754,0.07200000000000001,-0.8604,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,2,0,6,5,1,0,4,0,10,1,1,6,0,16,13,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,11,3,12,13,2,8,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,1,4,50,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28739831958605017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18770261531786145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922854316483192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390077968138385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822110053212047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058591062540288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3882842065879595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4682462368372622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604385913348545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045993823398596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24186169121625045,0.3084207274008464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,E-E-V-E-E,2020/02/29,Lately always feeling High... The past 2 weeks I have felt lightheaded and get waves of...That feeling before you faint. I feel the feeling of being high all the time and everything looks so fake and...Dream like. Has anyone else experienced this?,2.4796753246753243,5.416926318181819,2.6841558441558457,87.01409090909092,92.63636363636364,5.2415584415584435,19.92207792207792,6.868970318607317,0.8114259740259739,194,6,33,3,7,59,35,44,0.08800000000000001,0.7509999999999999,0.161,0.0702,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,8,10,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,3,1,1,8,1,6,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,5,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943894119392755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633515754627635,0.23936989048987306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987922442175003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951583850462331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20996135756696044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4724983877915367,0.0,0.2243105176097966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122056090026033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4936618106288243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635319862584744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413426031262218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19618080779773786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22301541337043146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362248997486071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873947704171238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PitifulDatabase5,2020/02/29,"bored all the time There's just nothing to do. I don't have a lot of friends because I have bad social skills. Even if I did I'm grounded because I have low grades. Usually I go to sleep around 4-5 pm wake up around 7 and go back to sleep around 10 or so. In the meantime I just watch youtube and lay in bed, I have nothing else I enjoy doing. I enjoy hanging out with friends, all we really do is drive around, talk, and maybe go to the mall and look at shoes or something, but it's better than sitting at home all day. I take anti depressants and I was in therapy but I still get suicidal thoughts, mainly because i'm just bored all the time, I don't really have negative thoughts about myself & I don't have any big flaws that I blame myself for. The other reason probably 50/50 in effect would be poor social skills, I'm just lonely, I don't really blame myself for it since it's hard to expect a 10 year old to know the importance of developing social skills at an early age. I attempted suicide once by overdosing and I'd probably do it another way next time, the only thing is I know that if I stick with life eventually things will get better assuming I don't end it, but it's a question of how long that will take and if it will feel good enough to justify how I've felt for the past 10 or so years (my first thoughts of ""i wish i was dead"" happened when i was 7-8 year old, i remember saying that to a teacher of mine).",4.993229411764705,4.493626703333334,6.042352941176473,83.17323529411767,68.63333333333333,9.592156862745098,29.64705882352941,9.168548406835145,2.176088235294117,1121,36,246,19,17,375,153,300,0.166,0.747,0.086,-0.9747,0,2,1,0,0,1,30.0,1,0,0,8,18,13,0,0,13,0,26,5,4,4,4,50,46,21,3,6,13,0,3,0,2,4,1,1,2,0,14,15,0,0,12,1,1,5,6,6,0,1,8,6,30,7,34,33,7,43,0,3,2,0,9,16,0,9,20,155,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311225945891413,0.0,0.06471610460563433,0.09978978888595083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388714624150582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317673590852737,0.07945958730420237,0.1740368266267723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16833308597496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06137416034006522,0.0,0.08196628724064785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949893393270087,0.0,0.08428877873189708,0.09833185855842116,0.0,0.06285620780690288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048118760187332375,0.0,0.0913742292735546,0.0,0.0,0.08094810248323966,0.0,0.0,0.14704994295403212,0.0,0.09944055475520218,0.0,0.1622549954866441,0.07982067785403747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415492908685687,0.0,0.0852499924138929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095459200165641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460142691477364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721851991806435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421886483971547,0.07991542394799747,0.0,0.0,0.08090668155526623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095606980895528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121005999330933,0.0,0.0,0.18262857785796244,0.0,0.19972129704560046,0.10134862339330908,0.0,0.07237798797791588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084666082530753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052099647297008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066076358867994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828972198086748,0.09784643924885672,0.0,0.0,0.1078044619044668,0.0,0.0,0.07567977753895469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872225145077202,0.0,0.19046934137177204,0.2910290830149323,0.0,0.07326339229331211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599964499468442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20819219112509016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310589114644404,0.07649078014546977,0.0,0.0,0.108830549591795,0.0,0.12644804772517793,0.0,0.0,0.22665338576139446,0.16647607996762856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481184124931156,0.0,0.0,0.07553829592749096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943613784449574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760315544869483,0.0,0.0,0.18385124142334586
mentalhealth,anyz74tsqa,2020/03/01,"Social belonging Hi,

I just wanted to make a post to feel like I'm participating. I am about to have a siesta Sunday afternoon nap. Thank you for your posts, there is a lot of inspiration here imho.",1.3099999999999987,3.9253589743589785,3.790461538461543,81.7795384615385,87.46153846153845,7.222564102564102,18.056410256410253,8.238735603445708,1.1448010256410257,156,4,31,4,5,54,33,39,0.0,0.7809999999999999,0.21899999999999997,0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,6,8,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,6,8,1,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17791705981173994,0.25137743281699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190688936334375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991489981328989,0.0,0.0,0.2348772976657245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6739922344993841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3586891998612131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239564694640205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20754322700317465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,milkybarzoomer,2020/03/01,"Feeling of nothingness I’m not sure if this is the right place but my girlfriend recently broke up with me, rather suddenly, through what she says is no fault of my own. We have become distant since despite my best efforts, but she has opened up to me and told me that it is because of mental illness issues she is facing, and that she is struggling and hurting, causing her to feel nothing for me at all, however telling me to research it as she doesn’t like talking about it, hence why i’m here. I want to be able to understand and help her, our friendship, and also myself as the circumstances have had a toll on me too.",9.71,6.515865040650407,8.87391869918699,75.25624390243905,61.19512195121951,11.791219512195125,42.486178861788616,9.3871,3.923079349593497,492,22,97,6,5,155,86,123,0.185,0.723,0.092,-0.9386,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,2,0,0,2,5,7,0,1,3,0,11,2,1,1,2,20,18,11,0,3,5,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,7,8,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,3,20,3,18,15,3,9,0,2,0,0,15,7,0,1,3,77,27,1,0.21352918760526848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17075921418196255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016541085790648,0.2358262115737618,0.0,0.0,0.2240857086877452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21935329499238435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159335461748882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312411344971235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22858741164714175,0.0,0.0,0.22286899523531264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043195752880567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215187198505198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20488701442129129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22309255367661726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108343124070683,0.0,0.0,0.18235275951123986,0.0,0.1698069804177461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17663355053681845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223227069042162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124873230382992,0.0,0.0,0.1716266726552446,0.18663392164692305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040362893491389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22229141480834289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259450472000722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926768794732197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ifoundthedevilfirst,2020/03/01,"Beware of other peoples standards Hey folks.

Im a tough man. Just wanted to admit for the first time ive spent the last month on the knife edge of crying without realising why but more importantly being unable to cry. I havent cried in years.

Im currently suffering from insomnia (never thought that would happen) searching my soul to finally turn my brain off and sleep. The answer seems to be that im striving for unrealistic expectations of what i want. Plus noisy neighbours.

That comes from the internet and the instant access to standards i will never meet. The perfect post of 55 deleted photos, the lack of willingness to show vulnerability. Im old fashioned but having a phone eats away at my curiosity and raises my expectations of real people. Its unfair on all of us. 

Collectively we are dealing with a 'rising' standard we will never meet because were too scared to recognise it for what it is.

Even being aware of this i still i cant cry and i know as soon as i do and let go for the first time in along while ill sleep like a baby. Ye i still cant let go.

Please set your own goals and sometimes realise that if you open a box (whether it be a new kink or jealousy or inferiority) it will never be closed and you cant impose that on somebody else. Its unfair, imoral and cheap.

Not long ago you died of war before you laid with a woman or had children. We have too much time but its your time and the more you define yourself with half arsed curious browsing you giving in to something youll never achieve.

Take care of yourself but more imprtantly be careful.

Peace x",3.383087482550025,5.632969355048862,4.483465565379248,82.44696661237786,75.31921824104235,6.600697999069334,25.62226617031177,7.5804360353943165,1.4384240111679856,1260,45,234,17,28,411,182,307,0.18,0.732,0.08800000000000001,-0.9879,1,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,4,10,0,5,7,10,1,1,17,0,25,6,3,0,7,54,41,22,2,7,12,0,0,1,1,5,2,0,0,3,16,20,1,0,5,1,2,4,11,5,0,3,4,0,27,4,41,24,7,41,1,2,0,0,26,11,0,5,25,166,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407413777885099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910975360347329,0.0,0.0,0.057816472068088036,0.0,0.0807058865330004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587809482982634,0.0,0.0,0.19340106325843995,0.0,0.0,0.08170034380172404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4167299652319008,0.0,0.09778076042919204,0.0,0.0,0.09843386416180272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704984515719316,0.07923060852551274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06264405505566767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389777468510794,0.0,0.16134977166264888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098371519363754,0.10780490079354522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387088872936939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40979437062606494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052124187691059407,0.07731112036269723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19397034140176367,0.0,0.04633634827443392,0.0,0.0,0.08393460868578807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757041651313747,0.0,0.0697217955263984,0.0,0.3657505453257753,0.09160163913431146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952359810147464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150679875413934,0.0,0.0,0.10411104116436697,0.0,0.0,0.09083504165449327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079540761869748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495612870108194,0.0,0.0,0.0863430875057769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18982646780036416,0.0,0.0,0.07301611313374844,0.09380387121843282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514862608283334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131143952645293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529612784260796,0.22121891817975844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316383977087877,0.0,0.0,0.11408654208737665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118837678237882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855826240381979,0.0,0.0,0.09142694304826923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737498076363138,0.0,0.0,0.0610769017710934
mentalhealth,sorenspawn,2020/03/01,"Getting diagnosed has pretty much just made me more confused and unsure I just feel like I have no idea what's going on with my head and I can never tell if I actually have symptoms or not.

Thought I had depression in high school. Got diagnosed with depression anxiety. Meds didn't help. Had mood swings. Therapist noticed me talking fast (I was excited about a new pet snake, idk I feel like everyone talks fast when they are excited) my thoughts were racing and I had lots of energy and hyperfocus. I thought I was on the autism spectrum because I stim a lot. Therapist thought I had bipolar. Primary care thought I had ADHD. Got diagnosed with adhd and bipolar by psych. 

Was later hospitalised and diagnosed with ADHD bipolar borderline personality eating disorder social anxiety and probably more I can't remember.

Just all of these illnesses have so much symptom overlap and I feel like I have a lot of symptoms from all of them, but am also missing key symptoms for all of them.

It's all so jumbled and confusing and means I really have no idea if my meds are working or not and I am always trying to figure out what illnesses I have for sure but I just am never fully confident I have any specific one.

Anyone else feeling lost and unsure? How do you deal with feeling like you don't know what's wrong with you and what is a product of which mental illness etc",3.841128205128207,6.253895907692312,5.109615384615388,77.7245512820513,74.53846153846155,8.794871794871796,31.217948717948712,9.408791572840183,3.348871794871795,1096,53,190,29,24,363,140,260,0.15,0.74,0.11,-0.8907,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,3,3,2,10,16,0,2,5,0,28,16,1,2,7,62,48,24,0,2,12,0,5,4,0,0,14,0,1,1,7,20,1,0,16,0,0,1,9,7,0,1,19,5,32,8,22,29,12,14,0,4,0,0,13,6,0,9,11,141,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.07945449492179969,0.0,0.2935542349900351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511180673553757,0.06774823518671529,0.0,0.0,0.05536861493470905,0.0,0.12457265583910092,0.0,0.0,0.056930986323621764,0.0834247476533965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04963307611851909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301345058553754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394078282039424,0.14025441807756975,0.3305596753822012,0.0,0.0,0.093314749599856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331332195961072,0.06801623625931844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080518800292617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780061241661933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20584282074635696,0.23266679383204464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042538760782082734,0.0,0.04627304862820189,0.0,0.1302385480807769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356074610106988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05457432946606524,0.08602504662041198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838272791685637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04474648284038547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591114378788656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887990586874703,0.20766195326388595,0.0,0.0770418828376332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869060617514063,0.1808792586020145,0.0,0.08205254016981903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970661857078588,0.0,0.1255927524264411,0.0786362599637731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926975828651658,0.0,0.0,0.05517252130059554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109308971768646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283374452183456,0.08778488435855898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05215994688352375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09223335946756384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240171857039262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299777070148498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767376953935588,0.3385075835368579,0.0,0.13088515069744416,0.07116495525459936,0.0,0.0,0.1890705521237448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231932277224375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055279058014203214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0592749683591385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902034688609997,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RavioliDavoli,2020/03/01,"Am I afraid of my roommate’s boyfriend? I just met my roommate’s new boyfriend for the first time and I had an overwhelming gut reaction to it. I sat down and my knees started shaking and I felt extreme fear. Typically, I don’t have any issues meeting people and I get along fine with just about everyone. 

I’m not sure how I should respond when she asks me what I thought of him because I have no reason to dislike him, but I do.

Does anyone have experience with a similar situation? Am I just wigging for no reason or should I stand my ground on this?",2.662972972972973,4.6822778648648695,3.9408018018018036,86.57931081081081,76.65765765765767,6.962522522522522,29.11801801801802,7.908726449838941,1.9162353153153149,437,20,89,7,10,143,75,111,0.11800000000000001,0.868,0.013999999999999999,-0.8059,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,6,6,0,4,3,0,10,2,2,3,1,21,18,8,0,2,6,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,5,1,21,2,12,11,0,10,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,1,5,64,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586561844586414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16313308682588576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181097590528004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14222126540812546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041677867252772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22293402732074835,0.0,0.2282181855888603,0.0,0.2625342851126538,0.0,0.0,0.22401049418430424,0.0,0.0,0.1984500945695015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218928355936416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435110089054686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253285364039173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617451105159061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4797551647673281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26224589113274765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16513529592373544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21988828815111627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18521902494321152,0.13604269402104946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mr_Truckasaurus,2020/03/01,"Any advice for someone who feels tension in the chest and excessively sighs? I suffer from generalised anxiety. Since I've got older I've had to learn to manage it, and to an extent this has been successful. However, since I hit my 20s I have began experiencing a very uncomfortable aching in my chest. This tension is accompanied by excessive sighing and shortness of breath. 

I'm trying to understand why this is happening and what I can do to relieve and mitigate it. Any ideas?",4.783295454545456,7.367424375000006,6.131818181818183,70.69272727272728,72.29545454545455,9.854545454545457,31.45454545454545,10.125756701596842,3.914768181818181,387,18,63,12,8,130,63,88,0.174,0.759,0.066,-0.8493,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,0,7,0,2,3,0,8,3,3,0,0,9,15,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,4,2,6,2,11,10,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,40,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727456941000957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796124059985306,0.0,0.2135204468292724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141127764408036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232319187006896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468184333866424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31508425764140313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4617698092453966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23649127974313836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894991976849087,0.0,0.0,0.29056615773440336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23029720347123614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518557929961359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheNotoriousOwl,2020/03/01,"How can I comfort and support a friend who is self harming and having suicidal thoughts? (I’m sure that this has been posted before but I couldn’t find one) Hey, as someone who has never really experienced serious mental health problems, I don’t really know much about what it’s like to go through it along with the overall toll it can have on someone’s life. This also means I lack the ability to properly support friends who are going through it. Could anyone give me tips,  pointers and information to maybe help me understand what they are going through and how I can help them as much as I can.",9.729130434782613,7.454779304347827,9.07913043478261,70.93521739130436,60.30434782608695,12.330434782608695,41.26086956521739,10.793553405168565,4.351121739130434,480,21,88,9,5,153,76,115,0.08900000000000001,0.679,0.23199999999999998,0.9472,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,0,4,10,0,0,3,0,15,2,0,2,2,21,26,11,1,4,1,0,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,12,6,0,0,6,0,0,3,3,3,0,1,2,1,10,7,13,22,3,6,0,0,0,0,13,1,0,0,2,66,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326986926425988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602607629493092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119903055160915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248612748548252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516621931097439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564029688139374,0.0,0.0,0.15918061164066774,0.2829151899819001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638185411213222,0.0,0.0,0.22244635911909694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119390278004404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720526863215555,0.08106778497472457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16670468038613134,0.18075258665333965,0.0,0.0,0.16722412346448629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439636155317995,0.0,0.12797981570428552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244230214839107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15892049976410388,0.0,0.0,0.15877802285105752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126052741206844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17310708950557085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811935036857506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18150668683033336,0.3766036561003992,0.15639240201844104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13173438409996255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17274488098374371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,black_dad14,2020/03/01,"I don't know what to do  So i don't really like to talk to people about my problems so i thought it might be easyier to discuss on here insted. I'm hust gunna get sright to the point. alot of the time i wake up in the morning for school and almost the first thing that gose through my mind is that ""it would just be easyier if i were dead"". this scares me a little bit. I've been to my GP about mental health before and have been referd to the CAMHS program but i don't hve the corrage to mention this to them as i don't want anyone finding out about these thoughts. in all honesty i think i'm a bit ashed to think this. 

​

(Ignore my spelling i'm dyslexic)",2.4161121856866536,3.6589275035461033,3.301289490651193,94.22454545454548,75.38297872340425,5.694648613797551,24.165699548678273,5.565023196281405,0.2778453900709219,522,16,118,2,11,166,89,141,0.053,0.914,0.033,0.1146,0,0,0,1,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,1,7,4,0,1,9,0,14,2,1,0,1,21,24,7,1,4,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,10,3,0,1,6,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,5,0,14,1,22,15,4,9,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,4,3,79,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829808449948707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979912819618349,0.2220407674914836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777126096593114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549244408547103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39899452507421257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16701478041223006,0.15543271641157955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547052415636137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942367839288955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042535542607008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927418250019771,0.1831466130315464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18415202686564908,0.19385098555491426,0.184508381078209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126684151742612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17274188284507844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748509373167813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706352929386316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18294775222608356,0.1849356943800277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468739769522447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139977924087142,0.2341760366634592,0.0,0.2901394049771533,0.106553164036087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077807410324313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298083805183765,0.0,0.2220407674914836,0.0
mentalhealth,gay-for-guns,2020/03/01,"How can I increase my self-esteem? I view myself as just not being up to the same standard as your average 26 year.  I’ve got a part time job and had to drop out of uni from ill health so I’ve only got a general degree instead of Honours.  Had to move back in with my parents and only just passed my driving test.  Im average build, fairly tall, been told im good looking but dont see it and I have decent social skills and know how to dress.

But, I just feel like I’m worthless all the time.  I put far too much emphasis on what people think of me and I seek their approval to determine my worth.  So,  how do I learn to like myself?  Do I try and meet my high expectations for where I should be?  Do I lower them and become more content?  Do I ignore all that and just go out and try to enjoy life?  Any help would be nice",1.3862476190476158,2.864206177142858,3.3222857142857163,92.02304761904765,78.65714285714286,6.038095238095237,20.80952380952381,6.742157984588678,0.2341809523809517,631,16,144,6,15,213,113,175,0.07400000000000001,0.757,0.16899999999999998,0.955,3,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,2,3,13,8,0,0,4,0,15,3,0,3,2,35,25,18,0,3,7,1,1,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,12,0,1,4,0,1,6,2,2,0,0,6,4,22,6,20,14,7,20,0,1,3,0,8,9,0,0,6,95,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511766416759815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016752106036786,0.0,0.0,0.1869588303619194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983974142876077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559413934386055,0.12093519887978504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962069446431652,0.14198583247285146,0.2707807926443165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799390051383636,0.0,0.0,0.11346625410541103,0.1788558814145564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36570753314271504,0.0,0.1679864091763769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303304029502818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11956898594136098,0.16540541146425508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215436778708493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799201309771109,0.12444185511521595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574934002576779,0.0,0.0,0.18796778986895132,0.1833160676223773,0.0,0.1173589253810331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17017531270662367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348959532764854,0.0,0.17659819727389722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17256182957691085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108469163801366,0.0,0.0,0.19741956125073684,0.0,0.0,0.16175634486741405,0.0,0.2298629302352679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025317952983278,0.0,0.0,0.10901215184865594
mentalhealth,tinyturtle67,2020/03/01,"Tips on battling anxiety? So I am a rising junior in college. I am a very quiet and isolated person and have very limited friends. Freshmen year while everyone was off making friends and doing fun things, I was always doing my own thing and being isolated and staying in my room. I have always been really shy, and doing new things gives me a lot of anxiety, so I always avoided social situations instead of fighting the anxiety. I did a lot of stupid things freshmen year and I was just always quiet so the people on my floor didn't talk to me much either. The few friends I did make, we just did not get along very well in the end. I did make a close friend who introduced me to all the cool and crazy things and I realized that I actually enjoyed doing fun and new things, even though I may be uncomfortable at first.

So now fast forward to present day, I have a very bad relationship with my suitemates and we do not get along and my roommate who is my close friend is never in the room so I barely, if ever, see her. I really only have probably three friends total. Now I have sort of come to the realization that I need to change something about myself, be more outgoing and open to new things and battle the anxiety that I get instead of avoiding it. I don't want people to be stuck with that bad impression of me from freshmen year because I have learned and grown since then and learned from my mistakes. However my concern is that is it too late? By now people already have their friend groups set and I feel like they wouldn't wanna include more people in their friend groups. Has anyone been in a similar situation and can give tips on where to start? And on how to battle this social anxiety and shyness that I get? Any help or tips would be appreciated :)

This is honestly really starting to affect my mental health because I constantly feel anxious, I think oh am I stuck like this forever? Will I ever grow out of this phase in my life and make lifelong friends? Sometimes it really just makes me feel like I can't do anything in my life and I am just stuck with people having bad impressions of me or spreading rumors and I just wish someone could help me out or give me tips on how I can handle this. I feel so alone and it's making me feel so depressed and anxious everyday.",5.150014880952384,6.078550281250003,5.879535714285716,79.50713095238098,68.50892857142857,8.919761904761904,30.11190476190476,9.120678840339163,2.5049560119047625,1818,68,344,33,30,594,195,448,0.153,0.696,0.151,0.8311,1,3,1,0,2,0,32.0,2,0,3,2,27,32,5,2,15,1,48,3,0,9,5,88,77,41,0,9,12,0,5,3,9,4,3,2,2,1,24,38,0,3,9,0,0,5,7,12,1,2,13,9,58,20,45,54,10,55,0,1,1,0,31,25,0,8,28,262,82,4,0.0,0.0,0.0627750302284912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662460048393364,0.07098775303651371,0.0,0.2141048163962906,0.0,0.0,0.04374537248845331,0.0,0.24605443164793894,0.14534508011510994,0.0,0.04497976345983454,0.0,0.052936616083506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113404533151468,0.07842773040693482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805069133198674,0.05541303636003225,0.0,0.0695159162196861,0.0,0.051360822207402686,0.0,0.0,0.04148635832769923,0.0,0.05540577246865882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056975679310318675,0.0,0.0,0.04248816025748869,0.116377054458895,0.0,0.06146833858871355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263131881195989,0.09191213807568624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05471752227581565,0.0,0.0,0.4472981734080536,0.0,0.13443528885840975,0.18512837340432836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837785375421994,0.0,0.0,0.08623565439069772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256499591403458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087380057427738,0.09428250722984627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109379046931439,0.0,0.0,0.2576373826239152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482768148679847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047288618515085375,0.04769853492960017,0.04961386286457984,0.186385689109464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0489244843049943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22298532300670665,0.05616889089103176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935666477569148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16484113305621562,0.0,0.0,0.06906439777183755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0512612357619901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053212940331144216,0.14461515295243926,0.0,0.13114896947771287,0.054505063370740535,0.04952298048791382,0.06362222096829308,0.0,0.09106364250248188,0.06856528729674723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051704559317753564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991575193932355,0.041218904225624325,0.06320211627882674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21230996226055573,0.03794243087619757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783876485205312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397423937794292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04569689777404334,0.0,0.0,0.12427572839154802
mentalhealth,Razere94,2020/03/01,Repeating the same words/phrase in your head I dont know but all day for weeks now I've been saying/repeating the same set of words or phrase in my head. Especially when I'm not actively using my brain to do something. Anybody any ideas why this would be? Its not a bad phrase or negative. Its pretty basic,3.3061290322580628,4.9531838064516185,4.281483870967743,86.45222580645166,73.83870967741936,8.185806451612903,23.690322580645162,8.841846274778883,1.53328,244,7,51,5,5,79,47,62,0.113,0.7659999999999999,0.121,0.1486,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,5,3,3,1,1,13,8,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,5,5,3,8,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,5,31,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797004992479904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206394775398965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949927528698577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704207526278664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30970150979686395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5423978118146411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29830847205537186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452260511752163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26883940049262456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20343418770238136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282289824561837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119671065704653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384464312795896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18771712016505246,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jqybyrd,2020/03/01,"I want to be a mental health tech, but I dont know where to start...any help would be appreciated. What certifications/degrees do I need? I want to be a mental health tech, but I dont know where to start...any help would be appreciated. What certifications/degrees do I need?",1.7355555555555533,4.21335218518519,4.0903703703703735,81.7666666666667,82.7037037037037,6.562962962962962,20.11111111111111,7.793537801064563,0.7186888888888879,214,6,46,4,6,74,22,54,0.0,0.642,0.358,0.9581,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,10,2,0,0,0,10,16,2,0,6,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,4,10,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,28,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263982192023886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4549552381402048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4126273178881301,0.0,0.0,0.2601952593120498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133388136852123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3912037431439969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878376178044276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747625473737809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22896424247061076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757587044496535,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tinyrosebud,2020/03/01,"How to stay interested in something that makes me happy? I don't really know if this goes here but I'm not sure where else to post this.

Since around November, the majority of days I've been feeling pretty sad for no reason and not like myself. Though, two months ago I got this game and I got into the fandom and become completely addicted to it. There were so many videos and things to watch, and it really helped distract me during those off days. Whenever I would feel depressed I would think about this fandom and it would instantly cheer me up. I can't think of another fandom or game that's made me this happy in years.

The past couple weeks or so, though, I've found myself not as interested. I am craving that excited feeling but I am rarely getting it anymore from watching the videos about the game, or reading fan fiction, or even playing it sometimes. I'm trying so hard to make myself feel the same way I was feeling about it before but I keep feeling like I've overloaded my brain too much with the game and now I have nothing left to watch or see about it that will make me interested.

I heard that if I become interested in something else then come back it will be interesting to me again, but I really don't have any motivation to become interested in something else. Not only that, but like I said this game has made me so happy lately that I don't want to let go, even if it's not as fun now as it was. I just want to be excited about this specific game and fandom again, but I don't know how. Is there anything I can do?",4.523259361997226,5.403355676375406,5.423652334720295,82.38543689320389,69.90614886731392,8.604160887656034,26.688395746648172,8.841846274778883,1.8394356911696712,1220,37,247,21,21,400,144,309,0.106,0.72,0.174,0.9761,0,0,3,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,1,27,21,0,1,7,0,25,2,1,9,1,60,54,34,0,8,20,0,7,3,0,5,1,2,0,0,26,12,0,1,13,10,0,2,11,3,0,1,11,13,30,18,31,35,3,29,0,2,4,0,9,10,0,8,17,172,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317304140711528,0.0,0.0,0.08389384670223786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435936358928171,0.09923970771333206,0.0,0.0,0.0938587886009975,0.0,0.0,0.0778817673253064,0.08425086689203927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277335651323694,0.0,0.0,0.3135718074153658,0.08053281843433817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565104670050947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152514315937644,0.09922965515494493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471885399171506,0.0,0.12207168291056987,0.0,0.08151445632784701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371821121704007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12501943856910416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871210621745941,0.06761179955940183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376935565499096,0.0,0.0,0.049446199350298516,0.0,0.053786860382163335,0.0,0.15138666696205147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022424317062836,0.08478006040665748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343610214721004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08412158064760232,0.0,0.0,0.10402482207156033,0.0,0.10675956541732072,0.0,0.102828104009965,0.09677719282203444,0.0,0.1387109497013978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910386795830124,0.18952150866768985,0.09595147464957822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554182287255147,0.0,0.06957228203852987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081092809726014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197901160024077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034587774646567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064025229492632,0.09628427742736413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466696158626384,0.0,0.18188901728350407,0.0973070705956161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900255967795837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541690292642099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828830295892061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185786056402539,0.09360271541262563,0.0,0.0,0.10087508697976423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891983526165761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287550779123262,0.12128471163476567,0.1859692922845604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425526442740871,0.0,0.09245084730999896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164384095103756,0.07512189867016329,0.0759155825266254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016914995650008,0.0,0.0,0.06094592664999885
mentalhealth,lost_353,2020/03/01,"Undiagnosed but... 
F(17) I honestly don’t even know what I’m trying to achieve by writing this post but I don’t know how to help myself. I think I have anxiety and depression, and some sort of CPTSD. (I know it’s not right to self-diagnose but I’m not saying this lightly). 

I’m constantly in a state of mind where I overthink everything and make my “depression” worse by degrading myself and my actions. I have extremely low self confidence and compare myself to others everyday, undermining my achievements/intelligence/hard work. I’m always reminded by my classmates that I’m extremely smart but I just don’t agree with them. (Please don’t take this as bragging, I am being genuine.) I’m simply good at beating the curriculum but I don’t feel a sense of real intelligence. 
I mispronounced a word a few days ago in class and I am 100% positive that no one noticed and I keep telling myself that but the scenario keeps replaying in my head. This is a more minuscule example of something that clouds my mind but the most recent one. I could go on and on about which issues have occupied my mind for days on end but I think you get the point. I cry myself to sleep every night and it’s almost like an automatic response to let out all the sadness inside of my body. It’s not a wailing type of crying, I’m completely silent and I simply let my tears roll down and soak my pillow. 

I’m nearly sure I have anxiety because of the racing thoughts in my mind and I’m careful of what I say because I’m afraid of being ridiculed. I make an effort everyday at school to say only what I think will receive a good response (laughter, approval, etc.) I revise everything before I say it and play possible scenarios in my head and my mind reminds me without fail what happened that last time I tried to make a joke. I don’t feel a real connection with any of my friends but I do like them. However, I wouldn’t miss any of them and I don’t make efforts to get to know them better and certainly do not tell them about my mental state. I never tell anybody about what goes on in my mind because it always comes out sounding like I’m making excuses to be sad. But then I think about how shitty everyone’s life must be if they’re going through the same thing as me. I don’t know, it just doesn’t seem normal but what if I’m just being over-dramatic?

That’s not nearly half of what I want to say but I don’t want to bore you guys. Any idea on what to do in my situation? 

f.y.i. I have no access to a mental health specialist/therapist/hospital until later this year. I have nobody to lean on right now.",3.3311647361647374,5.013152631274132,4.6875675675675685,83.42207207207208,73.84555984555985,8.099356499356501,27.1981981981982,8.77342768361299,2.096322522522524,2045,77,404,41,42,679,235,518,0.13,0.73,0.14,0.4874,1,0,1,0,0,0,54.0,0,2,5,8,12,25,1,1,19,0,33,6,4,7,5,92,76,36,0,8,23,0,2,3,1,3,2,6,1,2,28,21,0,2,14,2,0,5,20,11,0,3,1,9,66,14,63,64,7,50,0,7,0,0,22,25,0,7,20,266,94,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06340244067812639,0.0,0.07162177922892138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902876615955285,0.0,0.0,0.14591799848686232,0.0,0.10943258876693487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080260603413355,0.0,0.060862356944341285,0.0,0.0,0.06325789418842892,0.0,0.0794479550497363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292432467511051,0.0,0.0,0.06161230240501352,0.07499241686702288,0.07729292479590794,0.0,0.057106751722687726,0.0,0.15713332064679045,0.09225518841312122,0.0,0.12320845174925525,0.07259619050298352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334976413475106,0.0,0.07976908519525504,0.047241471508773086,0.0,0.060262748835156074,0.06834503420558234,0.12856379924739406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723301999194964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055259901390891035,0.0,0.07473753664420987,0.0,0.0812984112350116,0.11998325734943087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082082061214587,0.06324916541247289,0.0,0.06407219315737596,0.0,0.14681020812380285,0.07602754297632097,0.0,0.0,0.047941581669454725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074281996275673,0.0,0.07465333324434667,0.0,0.12714909940153124,0.0,0.0,0.1965408629387841,0.05830227763321096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462779564435198,0.05052009824274509,0.1048302480522073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387168762046942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441603990089743,0.0,0.4333180952084776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055164353428179214,0.0,0.0,0.06712120184870475,0.07007914110005146,0.0,0.08143148588302401,0.0,0.0,0.09693414327653628,0.05439785148071776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851277795705469,0.06761407729352886,0.0806334919563796,0.06850100984851107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16282181636903725,0.0,0.0,0.07062213461701697,0.0,0.0,0.1221636173254649,0.0,0.2843970531423137,0.0,0.07238694014559237,0.0,0.06511351324174249,0.14923198027529266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039689864819913,0.07157647810500889,0.0,0.0,0.055063303696162136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741129990655452,0.0,0.053777766072851424,0.0,0.1875475455798093,0.0,0.0,0.08304583312897768,0.04751791471655528,0.1833208760084612,0.0,0.05678272064342801,0.041706699905936034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971213206035392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437438836366433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894737770904026,0.0,0.052070923533948266,0.0,0.07288990592026792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046059641450401145
mentalhealth,urmomisbeautiful,2020/03/01,"how do i know how i feel about myself? i have this problem, where i dont really know anything about my feelings for myself. I cant decide if im kind or not, smart or stupid, lazy or energetic etc. its been like this for months and i dont know how to cope with it. Please, i cant find answers anywhere and this subreddit is my last hope",0.7866071428571431,2.6371147638888885,2.6797619047619072,94.17000000000002,81.91666666666667,5.7809523809523835,20.007936507936503,6.868970318607317,0.14157698412698405,261,7,61,3,7,87,46,72,0.10400000000000001,0.674,0.222,0.8357,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,0,0,8,0,0,3,0,21,14,9,0,3,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,8,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,2,11,4,6,13,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,3,42,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18731464115780425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5335457956605416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25386023034462024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301864333468377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20804363911817605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260813694415727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458723031375105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370347152842284,0.3752875587000316,0.18554342942951704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120528231572777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816868046236612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498621094674346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21780482669151546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582136133221593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Seobooty,2020/03/01,"How to be consistent with medication, basic tasks and hygiene? I have really bad depression and anxiety, I have no energy to do anything and I feel very apathetic and exhausted for nothing. I take 5 medications and I have an app on my phone so it reminds me but I always ignore it, part of me is lazy”I’ll remember later” and another part is that is so many pills it gets annoying and I’m so disorganized.


I’ve been going to a psychiatrist and a psychologist/counseling but my biggest problem is that I don’t do anything. I want to be able to get up and go out to walk, go consistently to the gym, do stuff that used to make me so happy and feel the warm fuzzies again. I want to properly care about how I look and not slack at all in my hygiene.


 I just feel very numb, the suicidal thoughts have decreased quite a bit but my anxiety is really bad still. I’ve got an amazing support group but I isolate myself a lot too. I’m also stressed trying to find something to do and the energy to do so because I’m freeloading with my grandparents for a bit while I get my treatment and a bunch of other stuff my family wants to try to see if it would help, since it’s cheaper here to get medicine compared to the US. 


I do want to do stuff and try to be as well rounded as my dented self can be, but I struggle even with the simple thing of swallowing pills twice a day consistently, I stay in my pajamas all week and my teeth have gotten spots too. 


It’s frustrating, I just want to be able to do simple tasks, have a motivation or goal but I’m just very apathetic about stuff.",3.501792452830191,4.8199542264150965,5.273726415094341,80.85228773584909,72.77358490566039,9.073584905660377,28.97327044025157,9.516144504307137,2.603576100628932,1236,50,253,30,24,423,156,318,0.17600000000000002,0.706,0.11800000000000001,-0.9657,1,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,0,3,20,17,2,2,16,0,28,8,1,5,2,53,57,34,1,8,12,0,5,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,15,19,1,1,7,1,0,4,3,11,1,1,4,7,32,6,38,47,8,18,0,1,3,0,5,7,0,3,6,180,47,2,0.1920077527467488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677426525054233,0.07988291585283501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066843510966708,0.14688540530293262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15800602038977035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031845337434508,0.05852307196144465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20962273642748447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788235028561026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061914558058294565,0.0,0.08268799804452928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634096549104916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050391051862466,0.0,0.14562733346431847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774580374839795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20063225196486464,0.0,0.1636836460595637,0.0,0.07678307005679899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219791158428436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06434937465821171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061907695951795,0.0,0.0,0.08161906256153527,0.0,0.0,0.06408333296154485,0.0973328622383708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19342761065225111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211830861911688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079256852058164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918627440826084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211193987380952,0.0,0.0,0.12300508304906856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875367709381227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650265980580408,0.0,0.1001529807248732,0.0,0.0,0.07941539861273983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390847435725688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232735849180846,0.07666881968503951,0.0,0.10997211602246068,0.10036409626177807,0.4396058788853179,0.10501265869280857,0.10894406121109856,0.0,0.0,0.0721829672029455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378070957597894,0.0,0.0,0.07621635410340602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19554099059270325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548084263164765,0.08291652493593255,0.0,0.2376397570419959,0.2831278682984181,0.0,0.07700851876216766,0.0,0.08631901446171329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819839928986765,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sea-Ker,2020/03/01,"How to deal with feeling empty? its not all the time. Once or twice a month I get these weird moods where I feel like theres a gaping hole in my stomach and I dont know what causes it or how to get rid of it... sometimes when I’m feeling like this I just cry and I’m not even sure why, I just do.

anyone know what this is and how to deal with it?",-0.7527531645569603,0.8521380759493695,1.2561867088607634,103.64478639240507,85.96202531645571,3.95,14.938291139240508,3.1291,-1.5060518987341776,264,4,71,0,8,87,51,79,0.11599999999999999,0.78,0.10400000000000001,-0.2316,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,3,0,3,1,1,4,2,22,12,9,0,0,6,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,3,6,3,7,12,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,5,46,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15185732518114362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231037136251824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23856206263816085,0.0,0.44780614480333975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25453337520338193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14344536014137896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3294382428780813,0.31030691062475857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269352015848463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387129271493218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21220638287084131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17335102623580834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312896417032916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21479660085264926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046896060572216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12663942077258095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959711949696468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ayylamaui,2020/03/01,My mental health is becoming a burden on my family It sounds like my family back home is falling apart. They’re telling me to “man up” to help out the family. I’m guessing this is because I called my father while crying last Friday. My mother sounds really distressed and she doesn’t even have faith that I can make it in life. What do I do?,2.6821739130434783,4.54928642028986,4.115289855072465,86.04076086956526,76.10144927536231,7.498550724637681,20.195652173913047,8.344100000000001,1.0186695652173912,269,6,54,5,6,89,54,69,0.145,0.746,0.109,-0.4005,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,8,2,0,1,0,4,11,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,1,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,2,10,2,6,11,0,9,1,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,4,35,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16899592039401912,0.0,0.13397479100011053,0.24272782761337905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244181821932358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24141610512691364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14516147186564293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6215621680495665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24211053793779974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336140193838301,0.0,0.0,0.1473127389228887,0.0,0.22045552034781996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791486201437347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15523588883872635,0.1073725593022146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670369911151754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22148479965314868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14079558489604788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19209589153813755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheDementedPoet,2020/03/01,"Schizophrenia Trigger warning ⚠️ 

I’ve got so many voices inside my head,
my Schizophrenia’s keeping them fed,
I’m starting to feel lost within myself,
think I’m turning into someone else.


I’m always planning my escape,
before my brain can escalate.

“I can’t find it,
where’s the door?
I don’t think we’ve been here before.”


Fight or flight is kicking in,
I can feel it in my skin.
My heart is pounding through my chest,
what is this?
I feel possessed.


“They’re out to get you,
stay at home,
you know it’s best to leave them alone.”

I can feel the panic taking over,
struggle keeping my composure,
start to shake uncontrollably,
I think the demons got ahold of me.


I’ve tried to drown them out,
but my head is in a drought,
my mind goes blank,
I’m in a daze,
somehow my body operates.


What was that?
I heard the door.

“Maybe you should go explore.” 

The hallucinations are back again,
no one’s there,
there had never been.


It’s okay,
I’m not crazy,
things are just a little hazy.

“Who are you kidding?
You’re so deranged,
stop walking around like anything’s changed!”


I just want to make my family proud,
but these voices are getting so loud,
they push me down,
to the ground,
I think I hear them laughing now. 

What’s so funny?

“It’s a game,
if you want to win you’ve got to play,
so pick a card and roll the dice,
Maybe tomorrow we’ll be nice.”

I picked a card,
they flipped The Fool,
I guess that means I’m just a tool,
a vessel meant for them to rule.
Which means tomorrow they’ll still be here,
emphasizing my every fear.

“Just close your eyes,
and relinquish your mind,
it’s time for you to say goodbye,
put that gun to your head,
we’ll be gone once your mind is dead.”

I’ve got the gun,
now there’s one in the chamber,
but let me leave you with this one disclaimer.

When I pulled the trigger,
my body collapsed,
then somewhere between life and death overlapped,
and my demons found their way through the cracks.

Now everything’s dark,
and it’s so damn scary,
I’m trapped with my demons,
in solitary",1.4282992016660891,3.734707721393036,2.028185815110493,97.17279590419994,82.48258706467662,4.8340622469050105,21.04037949785954,6.018495889221684,-0.0560783987041531,1552,47,343,11,43,476,207,402,0.17,0.736,0.094,-0.982,0,2,0,2,1,0,69.0,2,11,9,5,26,18,2,5,20,1,26,12,10,5,1,54,68,18,3,4,10,0,5,1,0,4,1,6,3,1,19,12,1,3,15,2,0,8,5,10,0,3,14,12,55,8,34,46,1,44,3,1,1,0,29,19,1,4,16,193,74,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886010699426782,0.0,0.0,0.07942421006347945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854935702303964,0.08497305146352296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339715775383768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16244626501214468,0.0,0.10017161514000347,0.0,0.0,0.21205264154467424,0.0,0.10655667009291897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097619463754118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973839940625728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042293265596459,0.0,0.08578664240118665,0.0,0.08998421657316717,0.10741071282860097,0.1930548111248649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724194747648624,0.0,0.0,0.10465884950130198,0.0,0.0,0.09974008807416876,0.0,0.05424791250126285,0.0,0.30536865713539835,0.0,0.10515180073847563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29388571819331355,0.0,0.10758201791049993,0.11311179103512975,0.0,0.0,0.09574674090917262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16968531399733336,0.0,0.0,0.052458252866984606,0.0,0.0,0.202141043067178,0.0,0.09760675099877268,0.06742099451624659,0.04663331904795996,0.09566858187734677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419778898574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371535195438162,0.09677395490597523,0.1917899335638304,0.2079517294021848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28913974771453016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361892987822244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165390416746026,0.1940434570479955,0.0,0.0,0.1119930601327566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595622756573848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590773900800217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808766785454894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13512368367978525,0.10173977163110692,0.07622856996359252,0.07980264800112087,0.0,0.0997877828973094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176847626210589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341446630081353,0.24464868846241575,0.0,0.0,0.055659178890307436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480604998390088,0.10382501930784238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260083358993035,0.07576583122779113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CptGoodvibes,2020/03/01,"Help for a friend (BPD) I’ve been worried about a good friend of mine for a while. I am no psychiatrist, but ever since I’ve known him, he displays all the hallmark symptoms of Borderline Personality Disorder. He was recently kicked out of his apartment and while he has been able to keep a fairly successful sales job, I worry that his career will become the next casualty.  In his latest impulsive decision, he purchased a gun, which prompted increased alarm from me and his other friend. I don’t believe he is a danger to society, but he surely could be a danger to himself if his mood abruptly turns (as it often does).

Is there anything I can do to help him other than just being supportive and not cutting him out of my life? Any suggestions on how to approach talking to him about getting help?",7.845645695364237,7.397123125827818,8.02555463576159,71.14177566225166,62.774834437086106,10.728807947019867,37.41804635761589,10.125756701596842,3.841562251655629,636,28,110,12,8,208,102,151,0.168,0.636,0.196,0.4965,1,0,0,1,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,7,12,3,1,9,0,14,2,0,1,3,19,18,10,0,2,5,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,2,0,2,2,3,4,0,0,3,0,17,7,21,11,2,14,0,0,0,0,25,5,0,2,7,82,22,3,0.16859949057472334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146534351136944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13874301513539125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18620489115054425,0.0,0.18995389049533346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21234515627389813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346129741585072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19322962297348187,0.0,0.14754255037385772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525078917278361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3907786445667359,0.0,0.08808627513794097,0.0,0.0,0.1414132535454277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33902605382251305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16730897906724002,0.14985897390146838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190868062722272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793074709457363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14721457198433802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664716569484421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13946724086247336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19132470390983947,0.15890302457366448,0.17523942629909928,0.0,0.13551388408876747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338783118282015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34244193338532003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yestheoryireland,2020/03/01,"HEY YOU, YE YOU! ye you, hope your doing good, you got this, your amazing and deserve the world and more.
all the best 
a friendly comment ❤❤",0.7816091954022966,2.83306555172414,2.014482758620691,97.83712643678163,83.13793103448276,3.8666666666666663,23.459770114942533,3.1291,-0.17597471264367834,107,4,24,0,3,34,21,29,0.0,0.556,0.444,0.9556,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,8,0,1,0,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,8,5,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,11,1,0,1,0,18,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5228989130996988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849586976829552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4179214704553329,0.3985084464487372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4948900791073335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rhinostallion,2020/03/01,"I cut off my toxic father today. [M23] 
Today I made the decision to cut off my father. He is the true source of all of my problems, including my depression and anger issues. He has a psychological effect on my brain that no one other human being is capable of. He makes it impossible for me to voice my issues when we're in an argument, leading him to believe that I'm so far gone and a baby. He has said some of the most unspeakably horrible things to me, the most recent time being when my car broke down on a very busy major road in a dangerous area. I don't know enough about cars to find and fix the problem. People were screaming and honking at me, I was absolutely terrified. My father is the only parent I have down here as my mom fled to NY after he cheated on her for 20 years then divorced HER. So I call him in desperate need of help and support, and he starts screaming at me, telling me to shut up and that I'm ""getting him in trouble"" by leaving and coming to help me. I was already so terrified, and the feeling of my own father screaming at me to shut up and that I'm ""acting like a girl"" was so unbelievably heartbreaking. I just let him yell. He shows up, I immediately start thanking him, he says ""shut up, get in the car"". We push the car out of the way, I thank him again and he tells me I'm a bitch and not a real man. I say ""I thought my father would be the most supportive person to contact in this situation"" and he again tells me to shut up and that I'm a pussy. Sounds like I'm joking huh? That's how ridiculous he is. Today, I voiced my displeasure about how he talked to me that night, and he took my fucking car from me. My CAR. Now I have no way to and from work, and I'm likely gonna get kicked out of my apartment because I was recently unfairly terminated and can't pay rent. He knew I was in a bad spot too, and he just blatantly made it worse. I feel so lost and defeated. Why does he have to treat me like this? And then he blames me for everything, saying that I'm ungrateful and disrespectful, when HE caused all of the problems in my life. I cut him off and I honestly feel amazing. Now I can finally move on.",4.1822876447876425,4.4092585608108115,5.689781209781213,82.51297297297299,70.37387387387388,9.045559845559847,28.46975546975547,9.04235418022936,2.068251222651224,1667,56,360,30,28,568,208,444,0.188,0.73,0.08199999999999999,-0.9944,2,0,0,0,1,0,53.0,1,0,0,5,21,35,9,0,22,1,23,3,1,8,4,60,58,36,0,5,3,7,3,4,0,2,1,11,1,4,14,27,0,0,9,2,2,14,5,22,0,1,15,14,59,13,60,37,9,72,0,5,0,1,52,35,2,4,25,233,73,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098723110494736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313250850569362,0.060693821269020114,0.0,0.0,0.11217551458546267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114732418017548,0.10166686536979487,0.0,0.0,0.1022805489821856,0.0,0.08576632033998327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575507754811745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712988961837365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287712717023237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948248612666722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15102897118918007,0.0,0.0,0.10906844955120414,0.09100048837696584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920461189258376,0.1560556072173408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347246866506776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078397152371685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054718249286956816,0.0,0.0,0.10542482241756668,0.0,0.101811826382844,0.0703256129110689,0.19456946713148446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086868182081562,0.0,0.0,0.18842137674523066,0.06646032456487433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660917363770693,0.0,0.10582170105724904,0.0,0.07382609030734566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343488677826542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746773338777827,0.07572357100426147,0.0,0.0,0.11055500660142628,0.0,0.0,0.06902574520497441,0.08693620501143379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858104052178639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332662078790005,0.0,0.0,0.196616597147768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470899250187836,0.23753394511904605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119150866733642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14094505638436436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22597007155823196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002647190585276,0.2610722574111537,0.18333191261516707,0.0,0.0,0.06614647621310868,0.0,0.0,0.0790433861157531,0.05805707699319785,0.0,0.28312756784354914,0.0,0.11062023521175604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215144589939045,0.0,0.1580599205645668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898418098044961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248441194185884,0.0,0.1014651096726462,0.0707280277436468,0.0,0.0,0.06411651259860117
mentalhealth,GravyOnMyCar,2020/03/01,"Need to end relationship There is a girl at my school who is mentally ill, and considers me to be one of her best friends, i dont feel the same at all. i need to end this relationship because its beginning to strain me mentally but its hard because im scared that i will hurt her. If anyone has advice i would appreciate it.",7.83909090909091,5.661014424242428,8.544545454545457,72.9868181818182,63.84848484848485,13.042424242424245,37.151515151515156,11.855464076750405,4.095824242424243,256,10,55,7,3,87,49,66,0.18100000000000002,0.706,0.113,-0.5927,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,2,2,0,7,1,0,0,1,9,11,3,0,4,2,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,2,9,2,7,8,3,5,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,1,3,39,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902806775922802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136154574101992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374021873387002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043493622583304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282134447858843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449328655360899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845760068640937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15044220287432575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17443320814853724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20845457777705406,0.0,0.2103338297586371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3924691765325307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28876869103271136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194907773271436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4181184133007755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19495129889890445,0.1970696736825879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832535290593598,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigNuckDuck,2020/03/01,"I need to talk to someone I can't afford a therepist, I'm going to call the hotline but this goes beyond just me. My mental health has been a clusterfuck the past couple months and I'm going to need to explain a lot to anyone who's willing to listen. So preferably I would need someone to PM me, it will make more sense once I explain",3.4007142857142867,4.345254785714285,4.535714285714288,87.47928571428572,72.57142857142857,6.171428571428572,26.857142857142854,5.6839178017228535,0.8872285714285715,265,9,54,1,5,87,48,70,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,1,0,12,17,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,1,7,0,9,13,2,5,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,2,36,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603506227295691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341682914721401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537457297634381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606633976425292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437636525187921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19496543489701496,0.0,0.0,0.1530774121679987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311074647114325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18304645478618856,0.0,0.0,0.5101287239591206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24422554548344524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21891836862260755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886156876399466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843241859633876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629071709418959,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Seeayedubbya,2020/03/01,Known truths Perspective is everything. Nothing is good or bad. Thinking makes it so. Be kinder to yourselves. Go to therapy. Message me if you need help finding a therapist.,2.892999999999997,5.525049633333335,3.273333333333333,80.50000000000003,102.66666666666666,7.333333333333335,35.0,7.793537801064563,4.143000000000002,139,9,21,4,6,43,28,30,0.152,0.617,0.231,0.4718,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,8,7,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,12,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814876983882264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029888008747728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3081287752032925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19159754361117026,0.2827668712512026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259697119578163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22503547808400026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499760516692795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234832937424158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38553511235389903,0.39143145340589264,0.0,0.2160179332061954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theresabray,2020/03/01,"SAD sufferers: Should you go any higher than 10000 Lux? Is any higher more effective?
What's the best distance?",2.0294999999999987,4.447076950000003,2.2900000000000027,87.55000000000004,104.5,6.0,20.0,7.1686216300943375,1.3889999999999998,89,3,15,2,4,27,18,20,0.23800000000000002,0.494,0.268,0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,2,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7516487604278475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5799773709431723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140865965639513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jjconner23,2020/03/01,"How I'm self healing from narcissistic abuse & psychosis. I was raised by a narcissist (and his flying monkeys) who was psychologically, financially,  verbally and physically abusive. 

I moved out of the house at age 18, struggled for a couple years but I kept going. I'm finally at a point in my life where I can reflect on my traumatic past. 

I'm still healing, and learning that this could be a life long process.  Thankfully, I have a patient and caring husband.  

I sat down to talk about [the different ways I'm self healing ](https://youtu.be/JK8cEckvlf4)...including taking weekly baths with CBD bathbombs.  

I live in Colorado where weed is recreational, but if you're in a nonrec state, I'd just use Dr. Teal's Epsom salt (the lavender one), dried flowers and essential oils. They relax the body. 

I also journal and write poetry alot. If I need to do something more tactile to really rest my mind, I cook. 

Cooking, gardening, or any tactile activity that forces you to concentrate on specific tasks really helps. Especially when you have intrusive thoughts.  

Let me know if my video helps in any way and if you'd like me to do another.",5.507216642754663,7.846418682926831,5.92074605451937,74.09187948350073,69.48780487804878,9.311334289813486,32.546628407460545,9.773937934552695,3.544893830703012,910,42,152,23,17,292,140,205,0.057999999999999996,0.831,0.111,0.9158,2,0,1,0,1,0,44.0,0,3,1,0,8,5,0,1,11,0,12,9,1,2,0,29,26,17,0,6,8,1,0,1,0,0,6,0,2,2,4,9,2,1,4,6,0,2,0,1,0,1,5,2,21,4,21,17,3,26,0,0,0,0,13,13,0,6,9,92,25,1,0.0,0.35054987942939275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830097104024627,0.0,0.1602839947549025,0.0,0.20119733241420046,0.15511934354189752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643188309961237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508262833737432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811146906403687,0.16368367321856198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15455719832294654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205200677327258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407302546438278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19831107423969227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17069338359116326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129942380732823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15127024218718932,0.2089771468594836,0.07227198317938142,0.0,0.1306264499147631,0.13091494804855436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14936890196345048,0.0,0.0,0.15722804428825976,0.0,0.10968952190810832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10024238570294122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121759899002162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984332425924528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18953774054500847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086501663978836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388509230317732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813849064723747,0.0,0.0,0.1546503897705648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122626943817457,0.11890194112679753,0.0,0.13619568476089186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174412893455402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776553944466862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348426829510141,0.11866193076815028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095263200097378
mentalhealth,LannisterZ94,2020/03/01,"i have attention span of a cat maybe less than a cat, its completely impossible for me to pay attention for longer than 15 seconds, i cant read long articles or stories or instructions. i dont know if this is Mental issue or not but who knows.",9.371632653061225,6.150965040816328,9.85887755102041,68.01647959183674,61.85714285714286,14.69795918367347,40.826530612244895,13.023866798666859,5.1056857142857135,193,8,39,6,2,66,39,49,0.027999999999999997,0.972,0.0,-0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,10,6,5,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,6,6,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,1,27,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579665948122125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4001352370198292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35634802303073193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3752649475074496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3021410780463177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34299674225609195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3440655021928287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34150687944383795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bon-the-Bunny,2020/03/01,"Can anyone give me advice? During the last few month I have been feeling really bad. I start crying if people stress me too much and I am so scared to talk to people. I have also been feeling really empty and get tired of talking to people. I have already broken contact with 2 of my best friends because I'm too scared of texting them because I think I'm going to say something wrong or that if I text them that I just look like I'm desperate for attention. In short, I'm just tired and scared of interacting with people. I have told my mom this probably 5 times but she always forces me to go on holiday with the people that make me feel the worst because they are so loud and outgoing. I tell her about my feelings and she tells me that it's normal and that I just have to try harder at interacting with people. She doesn't understand when I tell her that interacting with people makes me feel physically ill and that doing stuff with people I don't know that well makes me what to curl up in a ball and cry. That makes me feel really bad. I dont know who to talk to. Does anyone have advice on what I should do?",6.31092105263158,5.413498951754388,6.880526315789473,79.57368421052634,66.06140350877193,9.880701754385962,28.649122807017545,9.075114841892004,2.046317543859649,883,22,182,13,12,291,116,228,0.192,0.743,0.065,-0.9825,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,1,11,12,0,4,4,0,17,3,0,4,0,38,42,16,0,4,7,1,6,1,1,1,3,2,0,0,15,14,0,0,11,2,0,2,3,8,1,0,3,9,34,4,27,38,4,14,0,0,1,0,24,7,0,3,6,123,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780847970489755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055430282751043,0.07286944053327064,0.07581998170046056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127427860795187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15216447811547426,0.1666395698429176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562588058163077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001843063718272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974061182774653,0.0,0.1067931476616484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764411298829583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039986798838803,0.0,0.04760696799213784,0.08741157793649325,0.10357234223284252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015545056687372,0.07427578670049842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04451712385961585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651870083259787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432959328324976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671982819358293,0.07273192259092393,0.0,0.06698442848324361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927924513083697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5053746932189483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824386284453546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512336110186616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246308622912516,0.27368408819656803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014940695955205,0.0,0.0,0.06449592143070612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437881160653677,0.0,0.10431175845503636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21971885400539945,0.23893134294555896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058386665310982085,0.0,0.0,0.05313339498816408,0.20946039815738696,0.0,0.08707003205995545,0.0,0.061865185941809536,0.0,0.0,0.0948601872527484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192873315923938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962652242188977,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kaje26,2020/03/01,My urine is really dark yellow and I did a test strip that showed the urobilinogen is really high. Guess that’s what I get from drinking all of that alcohol and energy drinks. I have spina bifida so I already have a urologist I see regularly. Going to discuss this with him. I think I’m going to regret how I treated my physical health.,2.4097402597402606,4.936909757575759,4.714415584415587,78.05590909090911,80.2121212121212,9.225974025974024,23.064935064935064,9.606745405546679,2.6810025974025966,268,9,49,9,7,93,49,66,0.048,0.915,0.036000000000000004,-0.1779,1,0,3,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,5,5,1,1,1,8,12,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,3,3,0,1,3,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,10,1,5,11,1,3,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,33,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286540106881237,0.0,0.0,0.2958784991693545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5253135581156829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14008230223305293,0.0,0.3047590039769451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953658176127425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850003821759761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28328485265533904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3435307145512959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136579459702384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17180128963104366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shot-Article,2020/03/01,"Happy memories went away Hey guys 
So I don't know if this is normal or not but for some reason I forget all the happiness that was once in my life a lot of the time all I could remember were all the negatives I was like this for a while and still slip into this depression . I'm curious to know if this has ever happened to anyone else have you ever forgot great moments in your life due to all the bad ? And what helped you to see things differently ?",2.4121774193548404,4.161870365591398,4.042674731182796,86.78401209677419,76.52688172043011,7.660752688172043,21.302419354838708,8.472884824447931,1.1432161290322584,356,9,75,7,8,119,67,93,0.12,0.7020000000000001,0.17800000000000002,0.7428,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,3,0,0,4,6,0,0,6,0,8,2,0,1,6,24,15,8,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,5,1,8,4,11,9,6,12,0,1,1,0,6,4,0,5,8,59,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129767695227978,0.1901572048377648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436637176475284,0.0,0.15495852710225366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817720259512265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598469810096698,0.0,0.0,0.19390033389574574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15503525913428928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33575059033018845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20461182014769932,0.0,0.18376165282098586,0.1641151722795856,0.3951245167029854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439596449579095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039890162712954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621730918540997,0.0906690974076051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15778058547595894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18183718693894893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19764554458034045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19081574197153048,0.0,0.0,0.2102354316013884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14788989331416832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482111026273556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329665868660235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821806415371098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17204226742173734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i_fuck_the_music_,2020/03/01,"Suicidal friend, need help So a few years ago I made a friend over discord whom I have been talking to ever since. We have never met in person as we live in different countries. I am about a year older than them and a few months ago they tried to commit suicide. Before this we had often had long talks about depression and suicide, and from what I’ve gathered from them their parents are quite neglectful, and are in a pretty bad environment at home. Almost always I had to try and convince them things would get better and that suicide was not the answer. Despite being hospitalised and undergoing therapy since their failed attempt they still feel the same and their parents don’t seem to be any better. I have constantly been trying to convince them to hang on a little longer, to see the therapy through, but I’ve just found out they have decided a date to do it. I feel like I am unfit to support them and that I am the only one doing anything to stop them from committing suicide. I don’t know what to do anymore and I feel like I can’t keep trying to convince them not to do it as it’s not going to solve the problem. I don’t know what do to and I don’t want them to leave",5.675551537070526,5.722733206751058,6.098218806509948,81.49300632911392,67.14345991561181,8.796745027124775,30.43068113321278,8.418075326091056,2.1338959614225437,938,32,185,12,14,303,124,237,0.15,0.721,0.129,-0.8568,3,0,0,0,0,5,14.0,3,0,14,5,7,15,0,0,12,0,28,0,0,1,4,44,44,15,5,4,5,2,3,2,2,1,0,0,1,1,11,15,0,3,9,0,0,2,9,5,0,1,9,4,30,10,32,32,3,23,0,3,1,0,28,8,0,3,15,138,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17788726001011038,0.0,0.10047406635938322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348929807765212,0.0,0.0,0.06823331683386973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995083870176992,0.0,0.0,0.08256966832988323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377808319977499,0.0,0.0,0.08538029292554769,0.0,0.0,0.17748170813038228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842978963469999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642101809230611,0.0,0.0,0.10483190960419037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076151347416557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522018033775195,0.14336305033982852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001549622583104,0.15504186182292853,0.0,0.05242249143466487,0.0,0.05702442785755685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725448194514402,0.0,0.10064724830553064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918507183389374,0.0,0.0,0.11028633981361774,0.0,0.0,0.10624351054215443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804020892958487,0.1005650889400128,0.08860033914931335,0.08879601952273332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494229189834294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008887668878828,0.0,0.0,0.07439939498107777,0.07738689218121532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799166153724816,0.07631161077431697,0.0,0.0,0.22282706747797984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761131773164008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207987216510744,0.0,0.0960099658489341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672187030725692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995643749442975,0.09134399509167204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600134874769445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013009880283252,0.08388710521673963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.54876772273076,0.11386243357716125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612958526580203,0.0,0.0,0.22949061649345964,0.0,0.06666014399378092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724918067182143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05918198337678221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127727406971496,0.0,0.0,0.12922883294438642
mentalhealth,throwaway16840,2020/03/01,"How do I help my husband and our daughter? My husband had a rough childhood,  which involved being dropped off at a boy's home with his younger brother when he was 8.  It also involved a lot of family counseling which didn't help reunification because his father is a narcissist and wouldn't pay enough child support so his mother could afford to raise him and his brother.  His mother also, after her divorce from his father, put her significant others before my husband.   There's one instance which he keeps bringing up, where he was out and needed a ride home, his mother pulled up to talk to him, and she refused to give him a ride home because she had to get home to her girlfriend.   His mom is bi.  

In my 20+ years with him, his issues with things from his childhood have become more problematic.   He refuses to go to therapy to deal with these things.  He still has nightmares several times a week where he wakes me up because he's yelling at his parents. This has gone on the last 25 years.  And, our 13 year old daughter us battling anxiety and depression and she and her dad have a tumultuous relationship.  She thinks he hates her.  She has sensitivity issues-mostly with loud noises. If I even raise my voice a little, it's like yelling to her.  She has expressed suicidal tendencies. 

I want my husband to go to therapy with her to try and understand what she's going through and work things out.  I even gave him an ultimatum to go to therapy or move out.  He said he'd rather leave.  He is the one who triggers her suicidal episodes, so that's why I want him to go.  I already go and meet with her therapist.   He says she's being a drama queen and this is all for attention.  She has said that she has tried to strangle herself and suffocate herself. I don't know if that's true. 

I am at a loss of what to do.  I feel like I can't reprimand my daughter even a little without her blowing up over it.  I have to be able to be a parent and not let her do whatever the Hell she wants.  Is it possible my husband has had trauma related to therapy and that's why he's so resistant to it?  He is taking antidepressants and antianxiety meds plus adderall.

Any input would be helpful at this point.  I am going back to my therapist to see if she can help me sort this out.  I am seriously looking at ending my 22 year marriage over this.  I am also going through treatment for breast cancer and will be starting radiation at the end of the month.  My life is kinda shit right now.",4.006641641641643,5.5023658292181095,5.096077188299411,81.92135635635637,71.77777777777777,8.134712490268049,29.8018018018018,8.685302888712808,2.333046446446448,1947,81,378,35,37,641,225,486,0.09300000000000001,0.852,0.054000000000000006,-0.9717,3,0,0,0,3,0,45.0,3,0,0,3,18,12,4,0,19,0,45,6,3,2,2,59,75,31,2,11,7,19,2,2,1,3,2,7,4,2,25,30,0,3,5,1,1,15,6,8,0,2,10,11,73,4,62,53,4,60,1,2,2,2,102,25,2,7,21,270,98,2,0.07676376066949024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471071875061417,0.1841638550202255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0522019895967708,0.0,0.058724066800507436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05902659361067316,0.0,0.1403834280259632,0.08477954263707488,0.06532030641160776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06128961657053264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07914006656482463,0.06611651458159158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597981452375396,0.07931748501826451,0.0,0.1521052198377869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236604175944976,0.0,0.038814063887429084,0.054840045960408465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04010589664242741,0.07363879402383798,0.3490129136802411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578832121066298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20581252266452416,0.0,0.3080012435438834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012142228780335,0.0,0.06823115756479255,0.0,0.0,0.04218735531817687,0.06257271046828965,0.0,0.08128173873694741,0.0,0.07849614618846026,0.054220514334968654,0.07500579195157928,0.1538749095086941,0.0,0.0,0.06446222551521884,0.0,0.0,0.06526180422314154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526723295271459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990478872622791,0.06127210139739118,0.08158772915894846,0.0,0.05691935586634739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08055065376818361,0.0,0.10403422178277533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17047414368973685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256656607285843,0.08653960618786598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716878176580305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241555092357097,0.0,0.06555583218168225,0.14603983024199946,0.06104562355612625,0.0,0.0,0.061170778615986014,0.0,0.0,0.08672119962075388,0.07879689720234953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05433378490277304,0.0,0.06130363843044698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16793418981980385,0.08711060591601733,0.0,0.0,0.05771679465556784,0.06169980306656249,0.0,0.0,0.3511442014145652,0.17825728540722974,0.15299529488306918,0.04918711825220557,0.0,0.0,0.04476156616419054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423510917798937,0.0,0.0,0.07991378207636186,0.09233735241283864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358317647699717,0.0,0.06157525849040055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853470833007114,0.0,0.0,0.07399752596420099,0.0,0.05588493201936595,0.0,0.0,0.054530773119715895,0.0,0.0,0.19773338028958606
mentalhealth,Xanidincy,2020/03/01,"I’ve come to a realization recently I don’t really know if this is going to translate well to other people, but I can feel myself mentally deteriorating and I feel like a child again. I’m a 19 year old guy but I have to constantly stop myself from throwing temper tantrums when I’m alone in my car because of past events and just self hatred in general.  I think I have a fear of abandonment and a lack of object permanence, which doesn’t make relationships easy at all for obvious reasons. It makes me controlling when in reality I know there’s no reason to be, but I haven’t been able to stop it over the past 4-5 years. I feel like I can’t love anyone because of how my brain is, I’m questioning if I even love my family, and I want to change it but I don’t really know if that’s possible anymore. 
I want to bring it up to a therapist, but I know the questions about past events will come up and I don’t have much of a memory before grade 8. I’m constantly fighting with the idea of not being here anymore no matter how badly I want to be, and I just don’t know where to go from here. I’m hoping more experienced people on here can help me get some insight into this and help me figure out where to go next. 
Thanks.",3.8387058823529396,4.408736792156862,5.6231372549019625,81.46411764705884,71.27450980392156,9.294117647058824,25.980392156862745,9.478462496947786,2.009039215686274,962,28,206,21,17,332,134,255,0.171,0.672,0.158,-0.6858,0,1,0,0,2,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,16,13,3,1,10,0,19,3,1,7,2,57,49,19,0,8,11,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,3,9,12,0,4,16,0,0,8,10,6,1,0,1,4,26,7,33,44,5,37,0,1,0,2,11,12,0,7,19,135,35,1,0.10561301817731963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938323561194004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20947946993469727,0.07384707793456664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818245871934552,0.1287614312326,0.0,0.08986889970255324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178990566080749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117245694451424,0.1819525270880706,0.0,0.2282603058751989,0.11845398034307895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697564024460227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995625542196641,0.11884400761632323,0.16020334591976088,0.150899922576712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517844298107545,0.0,0.18006693624938927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045734924506108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158035971476038,0.0,0.0,0.10489755719034316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922424226143866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29021076385608274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319437192366257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906397446251216,0.0,0.14099501946377452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064330818757596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763772034994927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232064298514764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082309655518666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024587286370559,0.14643753777002505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906280934735068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366215020665611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531680764055984,0.21717554501924607,0.1042801142006546,0.11338885695375242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017741130234524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765944244682935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723427758118476,0.0,0.122624854226533,0.0,0.06767255758126023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18687988337978972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949587869549982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602264209475445
mentalhealth,teedthha446,2020/03/01,"Help- always feel anxious/irritable For no reason at all, sometimes only for about 15-30 minutes or so I will get angry and annoyed for no reason at all. This usually happens 4-5 times a day. And I don’t know why.

I do know it has to do with stress(cortisol), though that’s what commonly makes people irritable. But I’m not stressed that much and sometimes it just happens  when I’m laying on the couch. I feel like I could wrestle a bear. 

I can answer any follow-up questions you have. Most people don’t understand how far advice goes on this site- if you respond I greatly appreciate it.",2.8045376175548604,5.064974767241381,4.391692789968655,82.35894984326018,77.1896551724138,6.631974921630094,26.92476489028213,7.686295010490155,1.727768965517241,467,19,87,7,11,156,82,116,0.121,0.7879999999999999,0.091,-0.5322,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,2,0,0,6,4,1,1,3,0,9,0,0,4,2,24,20,10,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,8,4,0,0,9,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,2,9,2,10,18,4,11,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,4,6,57,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16509768339943756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14058138079794946,0.0,0.0,0.11489297572016588,0.0,0.0,0.19086737420190747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13489421539159266,0.0,0.0,0.10895989424528443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17085415074276086,0.12069915567761715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827031009291142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18626988804806927,0.0,0.0,0.2988069286069712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324478890582372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18570291391993768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254128530474339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277659731982605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419896756686613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849541031703507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342597248102089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892646134399744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3474210519137099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33419517874273663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870672910385796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16599422517211448,0.0,0.09851711734023777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758847180869527,0.0,0.0,0.18607647053581491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15245266515236158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,krevetkashrimp,2020/03/01,"(almost) 2 weeks without selfharm! Many people can say that it's not an achievement tho, i still find it important. I post it here because I want someone to be proud of me :)) I hope that everybody will accomplish their goals. Have a nice spring!",2.72673913043478,5.397351239130436,3.1327826086956527,88.98830434782612,80.08695652173913,6.288695652173913,26.591304347826085,7.554174236665415,1.6217182608695646,191,8,36,3,5,59,40,46,0.0,0.69,0.31,0.9229,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,4,3,3,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,6,3,3,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,24,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243615625781145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19746013079304892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960592686609912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217281007891177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284065423071492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245670546240426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102281852231569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575961489451571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744584571356711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586849024728277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910578649808209,0.0,0.25983106623272384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122497012799295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gorilla2345,2020/03/01,"How do i not get attached to everyone who’s nice to me? i have very bad social anxiety, so i’m not the type of person to just go up and talk to someone. Because of this, i tend to only really ever have a few ongoing relationships at once, and it’s usually outgoing people who are very socially relaxed and for whatever reason feel like they can help me. Whenever this happens, i always go through this annoying process of confusion that leads to obsession. it’s not like a crush at all, it’s more just like i look at myself as not worth getting to know so when people make an effort to be in my life i get weird feeling of indebtedness and i can’t think about anything other than them and wondering why they want to help me. And it’s not like i have the confidence to actually make any real progress so i just kinda live in this uncomfortable state of confusion until they inevitably exit my life.

This is really annoying and has happened like 3 times and i want it to stop but i have no clue how, so i was hoping someone here would have some advice.

Thanks in advance to everyone who takes the time to respond.",5.302857142857143,5.844292669683258,6.531134453781514,76.35367647058824,68.00452488687783,10.296186166774405,32.07530704589528,10.290406445055957,3.3027877181641903,884,36,169,22,14,299,129,221,0.09699999999999999,0.748,0.155,0.8748,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,4,4,13,16,2,3,6,0,14,2,0,6,2,40,36,18,0,4,9,0,2,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,15,8,0,1,6,1,1,4,7,7,0,0,1,3,22,9,31,33,4,20,0,0,1,0,15,8,0,6,12,119,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.1244239851356928,0.0,0.0,0.12459390484872775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609224079943784,0.0,0.0,0.08670602875772575,0.0,0.09753901458748956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492364095618753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645920832007813,0.07772430158026168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533325305797545,0.0,0.2436680832821529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893812537121432,0.09108776578914758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19984428109888366,0.0,0.14492514540216206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225499966228626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709243904944402,0.0,0.0,0.12663868818554674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07007200437541397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18011748255194054,0.311456249282112,0.0,0.11258698698362744,0.0,0.10706993397154574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17021773226985887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578593316216242,0.0,0.09697134809459984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17678827020410967,0.11133020915921688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512568605870058,0.16336265083810778,0.1310937397584621,0.0,0.1368898998613072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599453535818486,0.21606480060548164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659774571759574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958659640344242,0.10248162838924277,0.0,0.11738711262080892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169841269707492,0.0,0.0,0.14869539161446949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14042591989879732,0.21040572575047095,0.15040848051107428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150511167983657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827095300467712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057407234515802,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,darkhobbit2021,2020/03/01,Church and mental healthhttps://www.bibleandpopculture.com/blog/yes-theres-mental-illness-in-the-church-and-its-ok-to-talk-about-it This is a short history about how the church delt with mental health.,32.382156862745106,42.61865152941177,9.525882352941178,36.85980392156864,33.70588235294117,6.972549019607843,17.43137254901961,7.793537801064563,1.3742313725490205,184,2,13,2,3,33,15,17,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32172008605377084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9150492208295776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24327167876416975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BRoccoli20,2020/03/01,"I don’t know I sometimes randomly feel empty inside. Like, I’m fine some moments, then I just feel... sad. I don’t know how to say how I feel and even if I did I don’t know if anyone would listen. I love my parents. But I don’t know if they would understand me. I talk to them and I think my mum might but I don’t know about my dad. I talk to him about mental health sometimes but I feel like he thinks it’s either you’re fine or you have serious mental problems and screaming and throwing things in public and the like, just “crazy”. He shouts a lot sometimes and I feel bad mentioning this but last week he was shouting because I wanted to give my grandma a call before going to sleep and it was like two minutes after he told me to put my phone away and then my grandma (she answered my call) just told me it’s best to go to sleep bc dad was angry and after I hung up he got angry because she said he was angry. He and mum started arguing (what else is new) and he shouted a lot, more than mum even though he doesn’t understand that his voice is louder. I don’t know how to explain this but I was sort of trembling and just holding my head in my hands facing away from him and I really gasped when he snatched my phone from my hands bc I thought he was about to grab me or something. Idk. Then he said I was being ridiculous by clutching my head and being like that or whatever but he told me yesterday that apparently he thought I was being dramatic and apologised. Dunno how he thinks i would be in that situation. I really don’t like loud noises some of the time. I think it’s misophonia but I don’t want to self-diagnose. And yeah, sometimes I feel like I’m stupid for thinking I’m depressed. Idk I feel like I should go to a therapist but I feel like my dad believes the stigma around it, though apparently he is going to look for a psychologist to go to so he can stop being angry for little things. I wanted to call some sort of child help line but if I get put into care or something or get split up?? Idk if it’s worth it because we’re fine most of the time. Idk if it’s worth risking us getting split up because of a few moments. There’s more stuff I would add but I don’t wanna make  this too long and honestly, I don’t know what else to say. I’m fifteen and male if it means anything. Thanks for taking the time to read this :-) sorry if it was too long :-P",0.6320920043811604,2.821572212851408,2.395087988316906,94.01813033954001,84.90361445783134,5.228243884629428,20.299525374224167,6.574015621080383,0.18233365461847395,1854,56,410,20,55,610,195,498,0.134,0.723,0.14300000000000002,0.5303,3,0,2,0,0,0,43.0,1,1,2,1,21,28,3,2,11,1,37,9,7,5,0,104,93,52,0,18,28,7,11,9,0,6,1,11,0,2,23,21,0,2,27,1,2,8,11,11,0,1,18,23,63,17,47,64,11,38,0,2,1,1,57,11,0,24,28,254,86,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04690633464001339,0.0,0.055203994812914964,0.05971852692382936,0.0,0.0,0.1260542906243912,0.0,0.0560119104744244,0.16357388676841084,0.0,0.05708310743064068,0.075580118936903,0.07039998202618103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054992251647849,0.0,0.06839608698596887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05777890999191376,0.06808832831312751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207929266491727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861602240553951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713554176851977,0.19169782917631709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514506127155993,0.06435259448780807,0.1906254611003875,0.0,0.05365279361734551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376940247304196,0.07130661087236262,0.0,0.0,0.04496464800623795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580713146792446,0.0546819963057157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949624338579561,0.06723527852897515,0.0,0.11873355192747928,0.056333234585830436,0.0,0.0,0.1140639652885956,0.060545467113783676,0.0,0.044778749210652974,0.0,0.0,0.07307358472640157,0.0,0.0,0.1352087555761084,0.07116497974579526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06478965081919516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744882747262989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418983827738714,0.0,0.13487486822462927,0.0,0.0,0.06710164183272747,0.0,0.08595080048029077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762351827203247,0.10669496452348423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998270844104901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540465129903541,0.13426386996190767,0.0,0.0,0.10328829306589174,0.2653891401580625,0.07509447270860599,0.04748203814560117,0.0,0.0,0.056084799841437036,0.0,0.0,0.07679454427700773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05043843439917682,0.10783833329575684,0.0,0.0617614628806879,0.0,0.0778891001297189,0.08913457732587335,0.214921952271746,0.13181837289024242,0.10651359248729272,0.11735076412593926,0.0,0.0,0.1923034430038187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553082025004876,0.13967255385204774,0.08069317639799574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187027380428812,0.0,0.05381032773067927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19061674087404326,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dancingsteak,2020/03/01,"Should I be Concerned? Hello everyone. Firstly, I want to apologize for my english, It's not my first language. I'm a 19-year old college student. I've always felt like something was wrong with me but thought that I was just making things up in order to get attention or something like that. I know that you're not supposted to 'diagnose' yourself by taking tests on the internet but all of those tests actually revealed to me that I might have ADHD. I'm very forgetful, meaning that I can forget something that has been told to me a few minutes ago. I can never finish what I start and it makes me feel like I'm a failure.Sometimes I get super excited about an idea or a task, I think about it for weeks and then, out of the blue, I find it boring and completely stop thinking about it. I easily get distracted, for example I could be painting something and then a new idea pops up in my head and then I start rushing the process of painting just to get it over with. I also can be very moody, my boyfriend actually thinks I have some kind of form of a Bipolar Disorder. Even now, writing this I have so many thought in my head that I don't know how to express them all. Also, I have trouble falling asleep because of the amount of things I think about.   Here's the thing, many of these tests talk about 'poor time managing' but I feel like I'm the opposite of it. I always  start projects on time and finish them at least a week earlier. I'm never late and always too early. It might have to do something with my anxiety but I just feel lost at this point. Can anyone tell if I should take this situation of mine more seriously? Thanks!",3.8027777777777767,5.326744734567903,4.615017283950618,85.05837777777778,72.33333333333333,7.776592592592592,29.318024691358023,8.364918446050245,2.073918172839506,1290,53,257,21,25,416,165,324,0.127,0.7829999999999999,0.09,-0.902,0,0,5,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,2,4,16,15,0,1,14,0,23,5,3,3,4,59,56,21,0,5,12,0,4,4,0,4,2,0,0,0,24,11,0,1,18,0,1,2,5,7,0,2,8,5,37,8,41,40,8,38,0,1,1,0,9,12,0,6,27,180,61,7,0.0,0.0,0.17875115349207307,0.0,0.1100696236434803,0.0,0.08118623711797046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648397892888712,0.2286228462957922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006370736711098,0.0,0.0,0.06403967129112499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05583050786665422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602709411021564,0.0,0.0,0.07312466581424039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929587484803234,0.0,0.0,0.10496649148179124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049226601833772,0.0,0.0,0.08751518227853462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389272250085556,0.130859361127754,0.08793776107869848,0.0,0.08370874293250104,0.15580749523225412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19140144469874168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879891095768124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20678086385817915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953736347427338,0.10066750069085942,0.0,0.10331398229175344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789788801918756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997789119383373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226989818265285,0.18570942873482027,0.0,0.09976495460276263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19431839837140585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127488563464022,0.08845517291791617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610501692629242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657919873357517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294748289483382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35254024786444105,0.09058175953413068,0.0,0.19447698088627008,0.0,0.0,0.076570727042277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772386114377208,0.07361405948517616,0.08005096409266349,0.08432088782235198,0.0,0.0,0.18253874694420155,0.23474068110175475,0.0,0.14541949404642546,0.1068100846515052,0.0,0.0,0.08751518227853462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15113752440181416,0.05402031078859885,0.0,0.14693093060402151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001358683723064,0.0,0.058978943592167585
mentalhealth,LovelyBunny46,2020/03/01,Psychosis I want to smoke pot to get psychosis.,2.956666666666667,5.737758000000002,2.342222222222226,94.30000000000004,80.1111111111111,3.6,31.222222222222207,3.1291,0.9686888888888898,38,2,7,0,1,11,7,9,0.0,0.843,0.157,0.0772,0,0,1,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6630647542926771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7485620425955298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alostcucumber,2020/03/01,"I feel depressed sometimes. Sometimes I feel really depressed. I just know that I've never brought joy to anyone's life, only stress and problems. I don't wanna talk to anyone about it either. I just feel like ending it all sometimes. Thoughts? I feel better talking to random people about this rather than my friends and family",3.658214285714287,6.716688583333338,3.682857142857145,83.92500000000003,79.83333333333334,4.761904761904762,25.23809523809524,6.1826913282559595,1.1303095238095242,265,10,41,2,7,81,41,60,0.228,0.645,0.127,-0.7699,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,17,8,2,0,3,4,0,4,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,2,4,7,4,7,6,2,3,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,27,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25563642181568064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16167199864137238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148912384670373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190679617972753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723278416655606,0.0,0.3697172703309503,0.1305925614753313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123104819105256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046225703107747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291172486730851,0.08930698657249601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098685052535534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902785547187688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12673070222290125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17491518683023002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710654464691267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5423824737592619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093971110082068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938558924915198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512300879590373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Similar-Word,2020/03/01,"True Life: Fucked up Childhood okay now that ive got your attention, i have a million questions. let me start off by saying This is a long, depressing, complicated story involving events that are relevant to my mental health that ive told only some details about to anyone due to thinking it's a burden to hear and also I have no desire for sympathy. I'm honestly just putting this here in case someone happens to stumble upon it and give me their opinion on my story/possibly some HELPFUL advice.. (i try very persistently to NOT need help, so ive got the high functioning thing down to where no one suspects I have any issues besides being ""quiet"") so read at your own risk lol. im a 22 almost 23 yr old woman who's dealt with trauma most of my life. I've always knew i was different and not in a ""Im special and smart"" way Like i was told, but like an ""I am having a terrible time but i have to persevere because this is my life"" kind of way. 

One of my early memories is of me in the winter of 2000 when I was 3, in my dad's truck wearing pink Barbie snow boots and staring down at them while he asked me if I wanted to live with my mom or Aunt M. I said my aunt for whatever reason, and my aunt's house is where I moved. (I wouldve had to move regardless btw, my mother was too poor/had drug, mental health issues to be able to support me.) I was also coerced as a toddler (idr what age, maybe 3-4?) to touch my dad in a guessable area i don't really feel like mentioning specifically. My dad and mom divorced when i was 1yrs old, he then lived in my grandma's house across the street from where I lived at my aunt's for reference. age 7, my dad had been arrested a couple times for stuff I didn't really know too much about at the time, (Mostly drug charges.) also, February 14th of my 7th year my mother died via overdose on crystal meth. I have a memory after this age where i woke up to my dad carrying me outside and dropping to the ground outside in the snow. He had started a fire at my grandmas house and the entire garage was engulfed in flames. not his first fire, he also recently got out of a 10 year sentence (i was like 11 at the time) for manufacturing meth in his house and it exploding.

Almost forgot to mention when i was 10 i started cutting myself and the school counselor called CPS on my aunt. I started going to therapy then stopped. This may have been when she really started fucking up my perception of reality. I was grounded for cutting myself. A 10 year old trauma survivor. I was punished for the most... ridiculous things. I put on a little black eyeliner my friend had on one day as a 13 year old at school, went home and because she had told me a year or two earlier i couldn't wear makeup, she justify taking every single thing out of my room except my literal mattress, 5 days worth of clothes, a sheet and a pillow. I was excited to be able to receive my favorite fucking stretchy spiral keychain i used as a bracelet back. Also got grounded harshly when my aunt saw i had a facebook. It was like the end of the world when i got in trouble. My cousin, however, never received remotely as harsh punishments and was never grounded, though some things he did like drive 3 hours away at 16 years old, went punished with a stern scold and some laughing. 

At 12, i was cutting myself again except way more eagerly (id always look for jagged broken things on the ground to use) and id cut anything, id shred my knuckles, carve stuff right under where my pants rose so no one would see, arms/wrists, my upper thighs ended up being the most used to where i had enough cuts and scars from my hip bones down to the middle of my thighs (still have all the scars) i went to therapy until my therapist switched professions literally, then stopped going. It was more like someone i could just have as a friend. 

Fast Track: 1am, I'm 14 years old. Always been a night owl since it was the only peace and quiet I usually got. Im watching tv and my uncle who, up to this point, had seemed normal enough.. maybe a little more strict but not weird, comes busting into my room and says how he knows what Ive been up to and he knows what I do. Visibly confused, i question him, and he goes on a rant about how he knows i stay up and masturbate. (I had discovered masturbation but definitely was not doing it every night or even on any regular basis at all.) I dont really remember much of what happened next but he eventually left me alone, but i do remember the feeling of crippling fear and confusion. He would begin to come in my room and stand near me by my bed when I was watching tv or playing a game during the day and would obviously be staring at my breasts, which i caught on to and would pull the cover up. This gets much weirder.. i cant and won't name everything he did, some things include: trying to slyly feel my boobs while hugging and asking for hugs all the time (sometimes hed have an erection), putting random sexual objects in my room (a WHIP, a vibrator that looked used, clothespins) which all of, upon discovering, i would immediately take the item and run crying outside and throw it over the fence in the alley behind our house. My aunt caught him looking in my window and had him explain why she had to put a piece of material to cover the open spaces.(relevant because later when i finally told her about it, she didnt believe me and said I would've told her way before if it was true.) i would hear him outside my window jacking off. He told me before i could watch and he wouldnt stop. He tried to make me kneel in front of him. He would come into my room every night towards the end of it (when i was like 16-17 before i moved out) and I would barricade the door and hed still fucking come in there somehow. I fucking cant stand the thought of someone watching me fucking sleep. If i wake up to someone looking at me i will be pissed. I was late for school or overslept so many times due to lack of sleep because of that. Id sleep in class. Looking back, some teachers who didnt say anything Im truly grateful for, I think they may have sensed something was wrong. I told my friends about him and actually detailed events in real time to several people which really should've maybe told their parents or something but whatever.

One week before my 18th birthday, at (deja vu)around 1am. Here it comes, busting into my door. Only this time with a new delusional exclamation. He accused me of raping and molesting HIM completely out of nowhere. He was clearly having some sort of mental malfunction and I will never in my life forget the look in his eyes when i had enough and finally just started SCREAMING at him, At 1 am, while my aunt and cousin are asleep. He was pissed. Never seen anger like that in someones eyes. I however, felt no threat anymore. I hadn't said anything those 4 years due to being the reason i fucked the family up, i was trying to protect them and they crumbled me up and threw me in the garbage. So I'm hysterically sobbing and my aunt comes in and asks what happens and i try my best to tell her about all these things hes done and not being able to even SAY some of the things. He left that night and when i came home from work the next day.. i found out they had for some reason raided my room and found a roach blunt and my aunt went absolutely ballistic on me. Going through my phone and laptop, seeing all the things i tell my friends about wanting to move out. I guess she ""just happened"" to skip over all the detailed encounters i sent friends also.. which was the whole reason for me wanting to move.. she angrily tells me that if I want to move so bad then I need to move out. I pack my shit right then, just for her to tell me ""Oh i cant let you move out until you're legally 18.."" so I suffered another week.. Of being judged, condescended down to, my cousin even told me Id end up like my mother. If they only knew how completely fucked their mindset is...

Ive lived on my own since then and have absolutely zero contact with any of them. 
I worked at target when i first moved but the pay wasn't adequate so i willingly and shamelessly decided to be a stripper. (Side note, but this single decision has led me to meet some of the best people i know now)
I suffer from debilitating, undiagnosed/untreated mental illnesses every single day. I dont want to be on a set medication due to possible side effects and the possibility of something getting increasingly worse, but yet i do self-medicate. I fell into a very deep depression after the honeymoon phase of being free on my own. I think it was the realization of the trauma I've endured possibly. Either way, i had to cut most all social/work interactions and only work friday and Saturday. Sometimes thats even exhausting. Before the depression hit, weed would just make me tired but now i find it to be one of my only joys in this world. I also take a vyvanse (kinda like adderall) when i go to work the two days i even go because Im just so tired. Ive been exhausted my entire life i feel like. I have NO motivation. I dont want to kill myself but i do fantasize about death. I do feel my depression is very slowly but surely getting better. I used to not be able to get out of bed for an entire week. I would only shower when I absolutely had to, i also lost 35 pounds from lack of appetite. i had developed a worsening insomnia and currently still have to smoke before being able to eat or sleep. Btw please understand i only started self medicating with weed after i noticed its positive effects filling almost* exactly what I need to not feel the weight of never ending dread. it gives me slight motivation which is better than none at all. But not enough, and i refuse to let myself take stimulants more than a couple times a week, even though that's the only thing that makes me feel alive and motivated. I have always had; (keep in mind this is self diagnosed but all i do is wonder wtf is wrong with my brain so I research all the time) moderate-severe anxiety. Small and insignificant things such as planning a trip or seeing a doctor seem like a huge obstacle. i try to just mask everything around others to not seem completely out of tune, but have always in a way felt that anxiety and depression have been present. In 4th grade i recall hearing a teacher telling my aunt about how she thought I have symptoms of anxiety and my aunt just ignored it. She always just simple-mindedly blamed it on my mom dying at a young age and thats it. 

Hmm. I dont really know what else to add right now. If you've read this, thank you so much. I appreciate you taking the time to read my story.",5.130225830467617,5.66753749168646,5.907323891232675,80.68936531711991,68.38242280285036,8.924912255823024,29.818218881837844,8.947451262850192,2.30228315666324,8360,297,1646,139,134,2742,718,2105,0.13699999999999998,0.764,0.099,-0.9983,6,1,8,0,1,4,237.0,1,5,10,19,89,94,26,5,96,2,155,53,20,23,22,301,299,149,4,34,53,27,13,13,5,17,20,13,17,3,75,94,2,9,50,7,3,45,37,54,0,12,99,47,261,41,257,159,54,325,0,9,21,13,150,139,13,48,143,1101,336,20,0.12049303762638285,0.0,0.023516764678742117,0.0,0.0,0.02354888036689793,0.0,0.0,0.07239382319975897,0.024958889636420543,0.0,0.15417318185101264,0.1203118317613721,0.0,0.0,0.049163638480956035,0.025269491186550197,0.05530610638814146,0.0,0.023899343176063757,0.01685030670220732,0.0,0.05949330197660569,0.04290573979797381,0.06758683488972722,0.0,0.02264143504764756,0.03706068333733853,0.020121330684097136,0.07345143736110167,0.0,0.12303684034618532,0.027150878329122826,0.05058000366368827,0.04262652000707776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026902015886224415,0.024607372669154103,0.02756238706661924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455289927892532,0.07580079448517266,0.0,0.0,0.03848155437478415,0.0533293017277556,0.02647118878308384,0.09324964935446678,0.0,0.10378047674742594,0.02445957936645244,0.05002109986356309,0.025177915736761067,0.0,0.02466594594755514,0.0,0.02466124235618181,0.11297355417024202,0.0,0.05589346785558414,0.02465889172232202,0.020131294321591144,0.0,0.10672106710863186,0.09960121414983583,0.0,0.09550141794638783,0.0,0.08121646481786182,0.0,0.043316549113070285,0.0,0.022718022453684657,0.027117633277634987,0.08529486032842933,0.03443210006237408,0.04627688478116383,0.05279769322662119,0.02202569069501688,0.040996526500441784,0.0,0.052845758589543185,0.09309262197424024,0.17823019469863952,0.0503621111944454,0.046235160454312266,0.06847897004621513,0.0,0.11564314732594225,0.0,0.02654733309012777,0.0,0.08524127619091411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051231385795354405,0.08148264634330035,0.0,0.03230557729469556,0.02546150195581944,0.04834573645641623,0.0,0.02373227411757624,0.13903278771594033,0.0,0.0,0.1301531573455615,0.05030537048318744,0.0,0.02141994963259738,0.026661538720967926,0.025094991343937115,0.07946378677715332,0.0,0.027184278949972083,0.0,0.05236641517557394,0.07392737677562508,0.08510779587798159,0.1530537107991558,0.048306271343364224,0.08511804780710377,0.021326509320915826,0.12142056559101436,0.0,0.0263064768461652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048258022955628935,0.024432205604614853,0.07263087099643174,0.0,0.026768120318400274,0.048553623559239666,0.09714291332999198,0.0,0.048665447719492334,0.08467199363061104,0.0,0.2305170541488801,0.0708609974095937,0.053606436382936135,0.09293165877761377,0.02327458531584049,0.05125828499174658,0.09045964271211147,0.023611518755919873,0.0,0.027436424392022603,0.15172460865394344,0.0,0.09797904081595313,0.16495269253035846,0.0,0.0,0.026758651778894485,0.0,0.0,0.033413880320726744,0.0,0.0,0.026453034386732917,0.022780973469710523,0.08150267730729821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690302657185626,0.05399191130746445,0.0,0.07231538685215844,0.027429491220374285,0.0926291103648286,0.0991095286135997,0.023794467653536492,0.0,0.05459804916671667,0.061740237462095136,0.06876988284640011,0.07665671980552455,0.0,0.07316723213649867,0.05761041042123359,0.0658154016318321,0.07542031007962544,0.05444913421528932,0.024736874318400884,0.03986923434609525,0.0,0.09646404500570367,0.024565495562813008,0.10209335976614788,0.05565685627319523,0.047668278084594784,0.0,0.11939982908870088,0.025685909200185916,0.057735537297378736,0.06044254486603728,0.0,0.0,0.055174280150210885,0.0,0.0273468142382644,0.02271265239726779,0.02504768041078378,0.09059576875148592,0.0,0.10531622583107336,0.02218676005924403,0.0551177158392497,0.02798034073685884,0.1761104843261919,0.046324243929221014,0.04735351907654154,0.0382632050689752,0.15457301028242593,0.05539560860385629,0.0,0.2072452699218537,0.0,0.09816823581311653,0.0,0.04708167577513468,0.0250875003168538,0.0,0.10406729745055464,0.026541211563465474,0.059651625056104475,0.08528389855079707,0.11477011773429002,0.07732179740471645,0.029345611763120505,0.0,0.0893586024381953,0.0217452449929406,0.026905234691082004,0.0,0.0,0.026133911883389833,0.0877203664571587,0.0,0.024558539869895424,0.18830855299441485,0.052696088532205296,0.0,0.12414970513915645
mentalhealth,quantumshrarry,2020/03/01,"Want to help other people So I’m a 15M from India. I want to do something for the people who suffer from mental illness in my country. I developed an eating disorder last year. I’ve had suicidal thoughts. I’m not fully recovered but on the way. Before any of this I didn’t really think of mental health much. Didn’t know much about it. But after going through these things, I’ve really developed a sort of respect for the people who battle these thoughts everyday. Mental health is not really paid much attention in India. We don’t have really good therapists. My question is what can I do to help other people with mental illness and raise awareness about it? Any help would be appreciated",3.087694805194808,5.783251946969696,4.714415584415587,78.05590909090911,78.77272727272727,7.71082251082251,23.82251082251081,8.634040054169528,2.1701692640692647,555,19,93,13,14,186,79,132,0.109,0.725,0.165,0.8422,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,6,0,12,5,0,0,0,17,22,4,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,11,3,1,0,6,0,1,1,5,2,0,0,6,0,7,2,18,14,3,9,0,1,0,0,7,3,0,2,4,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733367971213603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084480954445685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460654184585823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041020082449986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243112412791672,0.1068965810565039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709406158769761,0.0,0.0,0.2562753146123105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004159330285296,0.10388639689363947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5137468049536618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810648489458743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3534230890845122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276991999058894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265835037221631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811500432353627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940644224188742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14797590644873035,0.08467019039733355,0.0816629557927264,0.0,0.20235752333982826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503432036111856,0.10116157605487912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905347634269847,0.0,0.0,0.08207175408477388
mentalhealth,millfields,2020/03/01,"Trouble being honest with therapists. I have issues being honest honest with my therapist. I think I really have something going on in my brain, I know I’m at the least, pretty delusional. I don’t want someone to think I’m crazy, and I don’t want to be judged, so I’ve been unable to be honest about any of the things I think or experience. I know that a therapist is there to be impartial and help me, and the only thing I’m doing by lying is hurting myself, but I just have so much trouble being truthful?

I’m also very good at seeming put together, I guess. And so, if I did get a diagnosis for whatever is happening, I worry my family would think I’m lying to my therapist to feel special or “cool” or something.",4.075310344827585,4.948185393103451,6.340862068965517,75.4278448275862,70.93103448275863,9.386206896551725,28.29310344827586,9.642632912329526,2.705262068965517,562,20,105,13,10,200,81,145,0.142,0.6779999999999999,0.18,0.573,0,0,2,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,0,0,7,11,0,0,5,1,18,1,1,0,1,25,37,13,0,4,6,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,8,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,2,2,18,8,16,28,2,6,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,6,0,77,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022014859693677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372704078843158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15386043943244118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13482118747740948,0.12993096623475944,0.0,0.06968943860651043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07200888394288225,0.0,0.07833022229822456,0.11560269232172365,0.0,0.0,0.15183190554496767,0.0,0.121879901751452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238248798347114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475465824777641,0.0,0.0,0.1438555095850338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15149215588163786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131865439165898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482359333475894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14021954062985997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855413581026454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882954625980684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254724634679597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167803131422386,0.21221181341549086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6401107693118285,0.18313218014242885,0.3532557340668917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372165420375555,0.16258779221890454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996994083189773,0.0,0.09790829881956234,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spoodoodlee,2020/03/01,"What don’t people like me? Pardon if this is the wrong place for me to ask this question. I have been wondering what’s been “weird” about me for several years and never gotten an answer that helped. I feel like it has to do with my social anxiety.

I’m currently a freshman in college. I have always been fearful of social interaction so I primarily kept to myself all throughout school. When I sought out attention (usually joining other groups) in my early years, my classmates either ignored me or said something rude about my personality. I was the weird girl because I drew cats a lot and hardly spoke. I was confused and basically shrugged it off every time. I started to believe I was a burden to people. The people who I did see as friends never usually paid attention when I spoke. I just wanted friends to hang around others for their company. I never asked for anything, I just wanted people to rely on if I wanted to converse. The rejection of others began to slowly chip away at me that I had a time in my life where I shut down. I was an afterthought in every group I joined. Why did the people I trust not care? Is it because I have a hard time speaking? 
My speech is often made fun of because I “mumble” when I swear what I just said came out crystal clear. 
I stutter and struggle to pronounce words under stress and I find it really embarrassing. When I speak sentences, I sometimes blank out and forget what I was about to say. (This happens often) I do a lot of calls with people online and I get worried that people will see less of me when it happens. I’m really worried about this if it ever comes up during a professional setting. 

Is there something mentally wrong with me or something more? I don’t understand what makes people want to stay away from me. Never once have I gone out to make someone uncomfortable or force a situation on them. I’ve felt so alone for such a long time. I’d get the same answers of “Oh, you should reach out more!” ....when I already do.",3.4372931985294137,5.573568388020835,4.6402267156862775,81.9105330882353,74.75520833333334,6.913480392156862,26.39828431372549,7.827709963407826,1.7044181372549019,1567,58,285,23,34,515,195,384,0.147,0.784,0.069,-0.9774,1,1,3,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,2,0,22,21,1,5,17,0,27,1,0,3,7,65,61,22,0,8,11,0,4,2,2,2,1,8,0,2,22,18,0,2,11,0,1,4,7,14,0,0,23,14,53,7,52,36,8,53,0,1,2,0,26,22,0,13,27,214,75,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496451608446763,0.09052872423791196,0.0,0.06826049231188791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275728653846789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750860697121855,0.0730293989893963,0.15338510122680388,0.0,0.1541509738858053,0.0,0.0,0.1500250833752139,0.0,0.0,0.09242643691712786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376788957365958,0.09382728612377256,0.0836411308702034,0.0,0.0,0.07066671747227223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420622445473575,0.13823767266616374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231326482682198,0.04147984739171261,0.058606507785158427,0.07876738866601556,0.0,0.07497938324137146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12676156178893128,0.0,0.08572080867700553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14508826088591462,0.0,0.14697621724692134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054986976216839824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057944426191432134,0.08015725466597445,0.0,0.0,0.07259924502324001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13948808285238504,0.0,0.07762441097746631,0.1095192835724822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267295483043215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530847656121677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736562237572637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45498725517214395,0.07163063791592444,0.08571012003145352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189905247267463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510867606864023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15606997219148955,0.0652382898215448,0.0,0.08302477343444659,0.13074408127849368,0.0,0.0,0.09267728667443544,0.0,0.0,0.09221185868160132,0.0,0.16725066485520765,0.06950880455283129,0.18946587484141714,0.0811356642670397,0.0,0.058065476279877536,0.08743942047000278,0.0,0.0,0.09397191752617792,0.0857617996054102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913433170914124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540232980076211,0.0,0.0,0.18070204481329866,0.0,0.1935477439293248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402469600520094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896450158288287,0.0,0.1666230034630174,0.0,0.0,0.17938689288283555,0.0,0.10565694000050224
mentalhealth,khhlev,2020/03/01,"From stigmatised to glorified As part of my degree I am looking into mental well-being and it got me thinking, in today’s society is mental health issues glorified amongst the younger generation. Have we completely broke the barrier of it being something that’s a stigma to teenagers and young adults glorifying it and feeling as though they need some type of mental health illness to fit in and to be seen as trendy.

What’s your opinion?",7.64725,8.662324225000003,7.465,70.04,63.0,10.4,37.25,10.355215969177356,4.202325,358,17,56,8,5,114,59,80,0.086,0.754,0.16,0.7538,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,1,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,5,3,0,0,0,12,11,8,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,6,0,14,7,2,6,0,1,2,0,4,4,0,2,2,40,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21935461138579648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578378159842307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16732580320167004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4447647599825885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21836278368658632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17568523628515828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6325089180264929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15512791258218947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265560120061917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610614791267126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340544857590218,0.2055495495528712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19830834154156246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881065502551342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DepresThrowAway12,2020/03/01,"The stigma behind mental illness I'm so annoyed seeing people on social media and such throw around mental illnesses so casually.

Everyone makes it seem like they suffer from ""depression, (social) anxiety, mental breakdowns"". They make light of what it truly is and make it seem like it's nothing at all.

I really do want to believe that these people are suffering like they say. But to say stupid shit like if they were making millions of money, they wouldn't be depressed or socially anxious, then chances are the severity of their situation is probably very minor or they're wrongfully self-diagonising themselves and trying to make it seem like they know everything that they're talking about.

Making it seem like it's so easily fixable with money and ""just cheering up"", or forcing yourself to socialize when you have social anxiety and stuff makes it hard to truly see those that are suffering.

Ignorance truly is bliss. Mental illnesses is one of those things that you'll never fully understand unless you've been through it yourself... hence why it's so hard to even explain to people. What's the point in trying to explain something that just can't be fathomed from the outside? I wouldn't want to wish it on anybody. How could someone who's so cheerful and genuinely happy with life believe that there's a life out there where somebody is alive, but not really living? To suffer from being depressed, more so apathetic and anhedonic?  That things in life are dulled to the point of no reward, no satisfaction, no motivation, etc.? It's just not something that's comprehensible from an outside perspective. But I'm not trying to kill nobody's vibe. These are my problems to deal with, why try to bring the mood of others down?

And I don't blame them I suppose... it is what it is. This is just the stigma with mental health, and we just gotta learn to live with it I suppose.

Still, people annoy me. The know-it-alls, the people that offer suggestions (but could mean good intents), the deniers.

Sorry for the wall of text, but just a rant I guess.",5.79342442517904,7.549567783641162,6.034575009423296,75.90627638522426,67.7335092348285,8.580512627214475,29.894553335846208,9.04235418022936,2.6861397663023,1646,62,273,30,28,525,190,379,0.15,0.696,0.154,0.3785,0,0,2,0,0,0,55.0,1,2,8,2,22,29,5,0,14,0,27,8,1,10,2,68,53,28,1,9,19,0,2,6,0,4,7,2,0,0,37,17,0,1,11,1,2,2,11,16,0,2,2,7,19,12,45,42,3,19,0,8,2,0,25,13,1,9,10,192,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101623710360803,0.081341547765838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409687377959272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224276094165369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497516860061482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423070175258169,0.1860451534042964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030104797396102,0.04755651466606207,0.0,0.0,0.068800812458746,0.06471058171100715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060391699872859216,0.0,0.0,0.07931810831254246,0.0,0.0,0.07664726275453647,0.12899895351522453,0.0,0.0,0.07653455421909597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965933183831538,0.0,0.07914062058031371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15257101755811078,0.21105867661281053,0.0,0.12715782998606906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364323583997492,0.0,0.0,0.0784310762186864,0.0,0.0,0.36280443383640576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055532232571626115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690876760178208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04879028805777859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24958493659456504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612996190623822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776301262658925,0.06889600554357288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225240295473264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451745423497735,0.0,0.0,0.1147522366486026,0.2621909647217231,0.07511358803979554,0.081341547765838,0.07390882051464205,0.0,0.08093304817905501,0.0,0.3669838757790464,0.061006897682946926,0.11086101792159744,0.0,0.08060012841388323,0.0,0.0,0.05750073632994926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242484309371967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057872325339472314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09566960282762947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19553800337535174,0.0,0.0,0.07495642069459474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059409031673803875,0.08493706291328074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12994086387338374,0.0,0.0827985250142215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787226732654197,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slimyguts,2020/03/01,"So I finally watched joker [spoiler ahead maybe?] No, it won't be a post about how I think I'm a psychopath or anything like that. It's just that I identified a lot with him on that part of the movie where it's revealed that in fact, he had never started a relationship with his neighbour, but he had imagined her with him often.

I noticed I've been doing that a LOT and LOT after me and my mom lost our housing and had to move, I'm thinking it could be a sign of loneliness. If I'm alone I imagine I have someone else with me (an imaginary friend, an actor, YouTuber, a crush, whatever) and I even go as far as interacting with them, make faces, etc. Anyone else does this?",4.121014492753623,4.5959815362318865,5.268260869565221,84.60210144927538,70.59420289855072,8.162318840579712,30.55072463768116,8.167268648758528,2.0137333333333336,524,21,111,7,9,174,93,138,0.10099999999999999,0.8420000000000001,0.057,-0.6786,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,1,2,7,3,0,0,10,0,10,1,1,2,2,28,19,11,0,2,4,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,0,5,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,5,1,16,2,15,10,5,12,0,1,1,0,13,4,0,6,6,81,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816707947678525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12265003192309865,0.17972722103744854,0.14434663842420106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400497912568993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535015737564658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29306337680761685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956273714288488,0.11585597191030422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921519552775492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552053691046267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996889612831673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20239840322293584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569596363674728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914796141095616,0.447379306802221,0.0,0.0,0.11708685111110713,0.0,0.17622188928560925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20543686840680184,0.0,0.18643197783242174,0.0,0.0,0.13528621309008854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19970427761391685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18995082356653892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679933079849715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18832359131967336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486234530415299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241553734485127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247899735454307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Diaetiacurare,2020/03/01,"Managing a relationship with my mentally ill brother- very burnt out I always feel like Ben in Parks and Recreation. ""What do I do? What do I . . . what do I DO?"". It's kind of hard for me to even articulate the problem.  But basically my brother is frequently suicidal, does not take care of himself, hates mental health treatments for the most part, and is often unkind.  I have poured in massive amounts of time and energy into trying to help over the years, and it has not paid off at all.  I would say that relationship is a big part of what took me from being the happiest I'd ever been to now probably mildly to moderately depressed.  He calls me and yells at me that he needs help, and why aren't I helping him, and says he's going to kill himself.  But he won't say what help he needs, or when he does, it's either something I cannot control or something where when he gets it it makes no difference to his mental health anyway.  Sometimes he has been actually on the phone about to jump off a bridge.  Sometimes I call the police and he is held overnight, and he comes out even more furious at me.  In the town where he used to live I called so often the police told me to stop calling.  Also, he thinks he dies whenever he goes to sleep so he won't do anything that might result in sleep, which adds another level of impossibility to the situation.  I used to spend maybe 2 hours a night to four hours a night talking to him plus driving 8 hours round trip once a week to talk him off a ledge and clean his super unsanitary apartment, but now I have a daughter and I'm down usually to about an hour twice a week.  That doesn't sound too bad, but even talking to him pleasantly makes me extremely stressed out because I've built up such a feeling of hopelessness and panic and anger around him.  And I feel like I can't talk to him about this because it makes him extra suicidal and you're not supposed to tell depressed people they are a burden.  But he is a huge burden and I feel like I can't take it.  

What the hell can I do?  My mother is dead, and my father is getting older and doesn't have the physical health or inclination to deal with this constant crisis.  I have talked to therapists, but they just tell me not to talk to him if he is being like this, and that feels wrong to me.  I don't love my brother anymore.  I wish I did, but i don't know how to help my feelings recover.  I just don't want to be responsible for someone's death, but that seems impossible.  Any advice at all would be appreciated!",4.873809523809527,5.3267222142857165,5.723928571428572,82.07732142857144,68.92063492063492,8.839682539682537,29.043650793650798,8.841846274778883,2.06401507936508,1972,67,408,32,32,648,237,504,0.17600000000000002,0.728,0.096,-0.9940000000000001,0,0,2,0,0,2,49.0,0,0,2,2,25,25,5,2,24,0,44,7,2,8,3,81,76,38,6,8,19,6,8,4,0,5,4,5,1,0,23,29,0,3,9,0,2,6,16,16,0,2,7,13,52,9,62,60,9,53,1,3,1,1,63,27,1,9,24,272,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.06669618004055754,0.0,0.0,0.06678726373121943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05465655264782137,0.0568696396080602,0.0,0.0,0.04647786275548338,0.07166710883640065,0.0,0.0,0.06778121553270904,0.0,0.0,0.05624322384540969,0.060842743154328374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706634872165248,0.08332660308332533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791570660824053,0.0,0.06968366045860869,0.0,0.0,0.05887433006739155,0.0,0.07385812554763521,0.07665624488017317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046208737774383,0.11773322489548255,0.0,0.07093272241956547,0.07140739059837484,0.0,0.0,0.1196207056521255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542636184216642,0.061823187886394675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20734781355392096,0.14647994162716374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141629559451321,0.0,0.03884280663252025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06122490640411559,0.06747787237434306,0.0,0.21794692705899374,0.0,0.0,0.22905559384927404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26922955584082386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561511164413658,0.07117220772738495,0.03756136740459275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13356230025406893,0.0,0.06035108058863984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061685250700530166,0.0,0.1368651611486103,0.0,0.06866309651371698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20663114141009398,0.07250467831832373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135590733308993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12827684205611167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278663382531972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018971750884625,0.0,0.14802487686726196,0.0,0.04738275456188384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736889266967271,0.06539822806430517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675680732982013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16305528594105842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221995154866791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682416275070968,0.13679142095078772,0.0,0.057909641882529825,0.10523272105945766,0.13519257860446274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05714061024925995,0.07829051479110682,0.0,0.0,0.14951963108473104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277590112595406,0.32960525080968617,0.11947544749760194,0.0,0.0,0.07935538195305457,0.0,0.04379358237344196,0.0,0.0,0.03985330722008402,0.0,0.0,0.06530786783191529,0.07593531136899283,0.046402686335322206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805860715816302,0.07527385034096905,0.05639289784406666,0.04031244894162922,0.0,0.10964664126239684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06167195168586324,0.0,0.07859493129603178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971025743879057,0.07472600623831044,0.0,0.04401280957999009
mentalhealth,a_sad_sloth,2020/03/01,"ADVICE ON MEDS I am currently taking Risperidone, 0.5mg twice a day. I know it’s a low dose but I’m experiencing severe constipation that I’ve been taking medications for, for months now and the risperidone is also affecting my libido. The sex drive problem is probably because of my current mood, but you never now.
I’m trying to come out of a severely low period which I cannot say was depression, because, here’s the thing: I’ve been going to different doctors, 3 therapists and 2 psychiatrists but none of them have diagnosed me, so I decided to see a new doctor, a psychiatrist, and try to sort things out.
To be short, I’ve had fluctuations in mood for the last three years, which is not a lot but keep in mind that I’m 17. 
During the more elated periods I also experience psychotic symptoms, and I’ve had those same symptoms also during one low period.
I’ve been prescribed the antipsychotic I talked about but they’ve never told me anything about a possible diagnosis, except one therapist who used to say I was bipolar as if it was obvious but never formally diagnosed me.
I am struggling and I wonder if I might need something to keep me from going down as well, maybe a mood stabilizer but I’m not a doctor so I don’t know. Also, I don’t think I can keep taking these laxatives for my constipation because they ruin your intestines’ tissue in the long run, so maybe I should change my antipsychotic?
I am going to see a psychiatrist but I just wanted someone’s opinion before I go to the appointment. Feel free to ask me anything and thanks for reading through til the end :)",6.623468123861564,6.897819042622949,7.77046448087432,69.53212659380694,65.1311475409836,11.105646630236793,33.9936247723133,10.864195022040775,3.8614225865209466,1268,52,224,33,18,433,160,305,0.09,0.826,0.085,0.1246,3,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,2,2,0,14,13,0,1,19,0,22,12,1,2,4,48,50,26,0,6,14,0,1,0,0,2,10,2,0,0,11,9,0,3,6,1,1,7,9,7,1,4,9,6,30,4,33,38,4,36,0,5,2,1,10,11,0,7,18,156,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170664588696907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001991001906087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445691662081054,0.0,0.08773470100324969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17162561067061294,0.0,0.07985727115176575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927816259045108,0.08084127178875565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06052384401577824,0.0,0.08083067460341196,0.19050638064784994,0.0,0.09805061500455756,0.0,0.288170537439976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312098883281216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180081791432217,0.0,0.0,0.04745209253656487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133426832660874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502477874023974,0.0,0.0,0.1031522127771542,0.07649820065264061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305204357178557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978574936345878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885647629712005,0.0,0.10424336498604778,0.09454143663949784,0.0,0.09955731809055976,0.09475917562551593,0.0,0.07490814241588488,0.0,0.0,0.0695866979949593,0.2171428260815421,0.0906384558616279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271869272262579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579890353183263,0.0,0.0,0.10118342822912632,0.08979933909053074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387285044136294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14926252434369755,0.0,0.0,0.14956854071441866,0.0,0.0,0.21204182078026146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951664321710925,0.0722483550513447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981097353745648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950868764827231,0.21168481781653445,0.07543102863677692,0.0,0.08640212682859989,0.0,0.2179282547427424,0.12469615672480935,0.0601336591210835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967526402934252,0.0,0.12743252189768353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105406836349792,0.0,0.0,0.05535365986551719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438013176089441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177356058507983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060434683458307575
mentalhealth,rolling_granite,2020/03/01,"Something needs to change, I’m ruining everything and hurting everyone around me. Bit of background. 
I have been dealing with my mental health for the last four years. Starting as depression has now developed into severe anxiety. I grew up in a home where my dad dealt with everything with shouting and being angry. The anxiety of living like this has (as my therapist put it) put me into crisis mode constantly, that has meant I have started to react in fight mode to protect myself, and the way I have been taught through example is to shout. It’s meant I now react aggressively, cry at the drop of a hat. I’m unbearable to be around. I basically spent a long time trying to not be him to realise I am entirely him. 

In my undergraduate degree I made friends with people and became close with them, I would spend my time with them everyday, we eventually decided to do our dissertation research together. The whole class had to go and do our research of geology away from the uni, which meant we lived together for 6-7 weeks. Months prior to that my first ‘episode’ of mental health really happened, I explained to them what had happened and I was on medication to help it. However my anxiety, depression has made me act still like an awful person. I would snap at the them, say things I didn’t really mean and just break at small things that hurt me. I couldn’t brush things off. They retreated from me and I had to spend a lot of time repairing that relationship. 

And now.
Fast forward I am in my postgrad degree now, one of those girls is at the same uni and she and I had become close again, slowly making up for what I had done. Two weeks ago I snapped as I was tired and stressed. I should have recognised this and removed myself, but I just didn’t and had to then apologise later. This weekend the pressure has mounted, she sent me a message about a job she might apply to and I sent a message back that was a little blunt. I later responded that I didn’t mean it quite as blunt as it came across and she sent my back a message saying I’m using her as a punching bag and maybe if it ‘wasn’t me it wouldn’t have seen it as rude’. I basically have reduced the bar so low that she just assumed I’m trying to be hurtful. 

On top of this I live with my boyfriend who I can snap at any moment. He’s the most understanding person but I can tell he takes it personally when I raise my voice (because who wouldn’t?), he feels he must walk on egg shells because I’m so sensitive to everything. He sometimes doesn’t know who he’s getting that day, there is no consistency with how I react. 

I am at CBT and have done therapy for so long. Nothing is changing, I’m trying my exercises from therapy, I’ve tried meditation, I eat better than I ever have, I run most days. I am trying everything people suggest and I still seem to blow everything up around me. Everyone I love get the worst of it and I’m going to end up alone if this carries on. And I know there’s giving myself a break and a bit of self love, but it’s very hard to do when you’re constantly ruining you relationships with everyone. 

I just need help, I want to shut myself away so I can stop hurting everyone. 

TLDR; I seem to have a major short temper and no exercise, diet, meditation, therapy seems to help. I’m awful to all my friends, family and boyfriend. If you’ve seen bojack horseman, it’s like that but without the drugs and illegal stuff, I’m just an arsehole.",4.416924778761062,5.55454653687316,5.5650626843657856,80.32201880530975,70.35693215339235,9.071828908554572,29.169247787610626,9.408791572840183,2.5274079646017698,2704,102,532,58,48,899,295,678,0.121,0.8059999999999999,0.073,-0.9746,2,1,2,0,1,0,70.0,4,1,5,4,29,24,4,2,28,2,58,13,0,8,3,99,107,47,0,13,14,1,2,3,2,7,7,5,1,5,37,44,4,2,15,4,3,14,12,16,0,4,30,10,86,8,88,65,10,94,0,9,2,2,57,37,0,11,44,369,123,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055304022161740414,0.0,0.0,0.06461611602086204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04242661184544539,0.0,0.1431820821797905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16661812491257091,0.0,0.0,0.11723290701063585,0.09594647234801153,0.0,0.07606342537767942,0.06890367159722333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055177938651640016,0.13622510605920812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135631538310662,0.0,0.0,0.13199843104403736,0.0,0.0,0.13484053863350254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853131010771966,0.08047139715703393,0.06432024739869739,0.10747098807515328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769107284166611,0.0,0.0,0.07235135169023298,0.06383945086044078,0.0,0.0,0.05525807401382883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05643435906903134,0.0,0.2384611851483145,0.2803557373631352,0.0,0.05881473078392766,0.0,0.03154571761376199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05306799203397575,0.0,0.0,0.09640306519719734,0.0,0.06519128189194832,0.05984914665032887,0.07091413340821931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034064961129356,0.0,0.055888226895172345,0.0,0.0,0.13263303042261929,0.0,0.0,0.12545395414238944,0.0,0.06258118372828833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26715455993266485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061911386310445585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857464869426727,0.050855304934963326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144023951589207,0.06253009807582356,0.16527170477209605,0.11042447966831284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053040837284101416,0.11261689040344786,0.1180678282398404,0.04164509527015887,0.0,0.06267806588309907,0.13591966954445636,0.0,0.06285028338277933,0.12574673492637622,0.06618479554823084,0.0,0.0,0.04979824874534468,0.0,0.0,0.09252120221807332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05986386102718929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04227635364394067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650525720345786,0.16342682181426094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543621328816704,0.0,0.06635830671942969,0.0,0.0,0.07993589230707165,0.0,0.0,0.13396472494907294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922836257716737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703896162750931,0.06508526056815105,0.07048173266002701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04803004640421964,0.06170424710589461,0.0,0.0883184116149654,0.0,0.0996477602670912,0.052159939117923784,0.07146630858860895,0.0,0.07142039849303294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0469087110037379,0.0,0.05453067477208407,0.0,0.2140415363035736,0.07243835642102757,0.12434529871989725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091384605018854,0.07170689731665451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117899409544604,0.0,0.06094491919831677,0.06494907645177281,0.0,0.05388400416844005,0.0,0.05147740119327668,0.03679860738828955,0.04952142871255307,0.10008927289686267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965501237004564,0.0,0.06014070221953052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863861177143137,0.0,0.0,0.040176425454447925
mentalhealth,stale_pancake,2020/03/01,"The Problem with Mental Health in Schools - USA The mental health training in schools is an absolute joke. They recently tried to address the growing issues by making us watch videos on mental disorders twice a week for a month. It didn’t help. 

At my school we’ve lost 6 students in the last 2 1/2 years to suicide. We’ve lost 2 in the last two months. I lost a friend last week. 

She told me she was going to commit suicide Monday morning. She wasn’t here the next day. The kicker is that my friends and our reported her 9 times. 9 times in a span of two months. Two times the safe line was called. One time we were hung up on. The other time we were yelled at. A series of emails that resulted from our administration were all dead end. 

One of my friends sent another email to admin on Monday essentially explaining that the situation got more intense. She was given the response, “We’ve already talked to her.” That was it. 

Naturally, that raises the question what are schools expected to do? If we are injured at school, legally all the school nurse can do is give us ice, call our parents, or let us lie down for a while. It’s messed up. So if they can do anything for physical injuries, does that translate to mental injuries as well? 

That raises another question. What can change? Things like the baker act are absolutely terrifying and don’t do much to solve the problems. 

What does everyone else think about this? I feel stuck. I don’t understand why the system is the way it is, but I want to change it.",2.815475909305622,5.24327620890411,3.491006140765233,87.96773972602742,78.00684931506851,6.493339631554086,25.137458667926307,7.6298220110432995,1.3352433632498817,1191,44,234,18,29,375,161,292,0.087,0.8340000000000001,0.08,-0.7278,1,0,0,0,0,3,36.0,9,0,2,3,4,13,0,0,24,0,27,3,0,2,3,26,43,9,3,6,4,1,1,1,3,0,3,1,1,0,18,6,0,1,6,2,0,4,4,6,1,6,17,3,25,7,34,25,4,42,0,3,1,0,33,15,0,5,22,148,43,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387737996433517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15940328842620002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254860129152824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552265573546621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16081404043744793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490192588431291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871124404589765,0.0,0.133031275813979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349543193108133,0.0,0.06732105888433416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262947439581531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03843223186702409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617216699807503,0.0,0.0,0.0729143749167881,0.0431974388911159,0.0,0.0607910207861059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158717455216184,0.0,0.0,0.05094696226038537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933323054785567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18587146073444255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07772394304631898,0.0,0.03713396252468271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489170964244631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050736330589887135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30639516478163137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18200801761294194,0.0,0.05587506652222258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083600819711649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030107886990924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439855507810255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14545992966583868,0.0,0.0,0.1702940543457877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504932256695697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4615485654815545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543685082237328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662821429952316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06109283337300444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050496736308117865,0.0487032416657546,0.0,0.0,0.22160612897203855,0.0,0.0,0.07262947439581531,0.0,0.0516048499357278,0.0,0.22274807259971216,0.07912763298986274,0.2742869606395437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04483184148308468,0.0603320886203855,0.1219390279996659,0.0,0.06834085949541346,0.0,0.06858593894745746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04894704623805872
mentalhealth,RealHooman_Bean,2020/03/01,"Help AM I JOE? AM I JOE AM I JOE?  
they dont stop speaking i cant stop listening everyone hates joe i am not joe I am bruce, no this is joe AM I JOE? Round and round and round and round the wheels on my head go no medication. Spencer hid my gun? Am I spencer? If I am spencer why cant remember where put gun? Hid it from joe yer losing it kid leave these people alone walk into the forest never return better for everyone. 

Debra left and took the meds AM IJOE? ROUND AND ROUND JOE GOES ROUND AND ROUND. Call hospital need debra meds. Smear myself with in fat and jump on the ocean eaten by shark with anylcuk. Debra left need meds. Call parachute nurses. I am joe first infantry call seargent seargent know seargent understand Am I Jpoe?",-0.01585585585585747,2.2850031351351348,1.4055405405405423,95.9690765765766,98.72972972972971,4.358558558558559,17.653153153153152,6.21433560688645,-0.11237927927927947,576,17,121,7,24,183,79,148,0.175,0.7829999999999999,0.043,-0.9441,0,1,0,2,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,3,1,3,1,0,4,0,15,4,2,0,1,20,24,8,0,3,2,0,8,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,10,2,2,3,0,0,5,7,2,0,1,2,10,15,1,9,22,0,17,0,1,8,0,8,7,0,1,5,61,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14531018567773846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408539857449798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4297909815320889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16443247648722548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681284579194433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193405028168526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973665493448512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851882218834188,0.1439899590680598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404123147106426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771061118199404,0.0,0.0,0.14855917818744868,0.304876283492052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15696164674060895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4675304779626353,0.14133914123376776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20806377574744955,0.1082092736418056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972674911493952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104189918913662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15893440729192007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23459690569200886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588028376154467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605895463846275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12660040705181272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SpaceDust99,2020/03/01,"It hit me like a wave. I’m not okay. This is not okay. I need help. After another party, doing regrettable things. I felt mentally and physically exhausted. I lied down, started listening to Grandma Shirley reading books from Skyrim. Her calm, warm voice made me cry. At that point this lady from YouTube made me feel like a kid a little bit. Made me miss having my grandmother around and I suddenly realized how bad things have gotten with me. I’m not okay. I’ve been drinking insane amounts of alcohol, very often alone, very often to numb my feelings. I have been feeling extremely depressed, unmotivated, lonely. I kept telling myself that it’s me just being lazy and everybody gets sad sometimes and I can’t blame things on my mental health. I have no idea what to do. I have been taking meds on and off for years now. Quitting them cold turkey most of the time. Haven’t taken anything in months, because I thought I was getting better and I don’t need them. I started therapy and never finished it. Just gave up on it. I’m scared to go to psychiatrist. She knows my history. She knows I have reached out for help earlier and refused it later so many times. Feels like a hopeless case.
I’m sorry if it’s a wrong place to post this. I will delete it if it is.",1.6499802501645815,4.3348942244897986,2.9045029624753127,88.31526662277815,86.3469387755102,5.936800526662277,23.82159315339039,7.359569317364363,1.3044193548387102,995,39,191,17,31,320,152,245,0.24600000000000002,0.677,0.076,-0.9908,0,3,2,0,1,1,34.0,0,0,2,2,8,19,0,1,6,3,19,5,0,4,1,40,49,12,0,4,7,0,6,3,0,1,4,2,0,1,17,11,2,2,10,3,0,1,8,10,0,0,13,9,31,9,24,33,3,27,0,5,0,0,12,13,0,5,15,120,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288577509175141,0.0,0.12487908946903314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264331505403743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922275507939676,0.10733710106934558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006748894417456,0.07350125547621576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663857814311026,0.13163641096908374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13244571375365385,0.0,0.0,0.10385086540043184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811736297934672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438648891234477,0.1722772674158342,0.1157706796880546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259906726884846,0.0,0.06852541560719011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281653331449672,0.0,0.0,0.16163744205375746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611422932362652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132529471236465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17672021400803736,0.12084758714988472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34227226412255585,0.0,0.12224388320433625,0.0,0.0,0.1339313783927911,0.0,0.2430220002118326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962416242793558,0.0,0.0,0.1788093157106961,0.092994689267432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597496273819353,0.0,0.11398212282506187,0.0,0.11547729157491635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824610069651554,0.12060739074333228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071637069918945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925152221263985,0.13497357389866427,0.1706868735698581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906572149341429,0.0,0.10538765609915697,0.0,0.1378877479704569,0.0,0.2403135415765669,0.0,0.0,0.09572289229982324,0.1406162261349493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19897361169690286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182957355760624,0.0,0.07764619320746677
mentalhealth,hotsydney1975,2020/03/01,"Processing emotions How does one process emotions? Specifically emotional pain, emptiness, heartache and loneliness?

I’m trying but it never resolves, it just just keeps coming back up multiple times a day. It aches and hurts so much and I don’t know how much longer I can take it.

I’m desperate. Everything I’m trying doesn’t seem to work. Help please.",2.2108854166666667,4.835292484375003,2.5306250000000037,86.41854166666668,100.71875,6.508333333333333,25.64583333333333,7.492282038375204,2.264077083333334,285,13,49,7,12,87,46,64,0.248,0.643,0.109,-0.8375,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,6,3,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,2,1,14,11,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,2,11,2,6,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,26,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14782162048027114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655987761058279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12397967365509685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16823157418719414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.648736442773989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727739994760478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885522759482654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20579818622564855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17087281615804764,0.0,0.0,0.10565073885243248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826388108009093,0.0,0.1482682687675775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302676159051895,0.0,0.20455819637723294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21102311439182492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17500917316645775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445414616196042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209739273230036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26103831861376914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995388698897773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,princesswitxh,2020/03/01,"Religion and psychotic things? So, hi. I am someone who is in the beggiming of a process of converting to new religion (paganism). In that religion we believe that the gods send us signs and that we can meet them through dream and meditation. And I was wondering because I read an article on religion and psycoticism? (Sure thats not how you say or write that but ok) and now I am wondering if it would be a sign of me being psychotic to join and start looking for signs of the gods.",2.8326477541371133,5.135981744680855,4.551418439716315,81.0338888888889,77.29787234042553,10.135224586288416,31.72104018912529,10.25414643259724,3.9037579196217482,380,20,75,14,9,128,64,94,0.0,0.948,0.052000000000000005,0.5661,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,3,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,6,1,8,0,0,1,1,22,12,12,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,8,9,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,10,2,11,8,0,7,1,0,1,0,11,3,0,4,3,57,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224833242899378,0.0,0.0,0.29987056013798136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235069069385812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570584587001761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26623147999220004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21166068025289544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22551604120007335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18838903107709054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508521350221821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17682451421309647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201570511681897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5772771473593755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890720392531246,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,equinox_games7,2020/03/01,"every day feels the same i havent been diagnosed with depression. I was diagnosed with ADHD at the age of 10 or so, and Im also pretty sure I have rejection sensitive dysphoria, because my god, I cannot bring myself to try shit. Every day seems the same. wake up, go to school and be tired the entire time, go home, do 2 hours of homework, play the same games for a few hours, browse the same reddit home page, then toss and turn in bed for the same 5 hours every night, and repeat. every day feels predictable. 

im just waiting for SOMETHING to happen. but the catch is i dont want to try to MAKE things happen. because the idea of trying things is somehow scary.

i want a job but hate applying, i want my license but i somehow figure if i dont have a job i cant get a car, or pay for fuel. 

its just confusiing, and i honestly have no clue where the fuck im going in life?? i feel like i cant keep going comfortably for the rest of my life because i dont now what im doing to begin with, so how could i understand the rest of it?

i dont even know what this post is, or if it even makes sense. i just want things to change but dont really want to at the same time?

is there some way to make life more exciting without the risk of fucking it up? 

ive thought about drugs. but thats one thing i really dont want to fall to. 

i feel like i want too much stuff without the repercussions that doing that stuff may bring

im really confused and bored and frustrated and i dont know what to do next",3.3083761454108465,3.6996840977917986,4.665597115817938,88.49882229232391,72.37539432176656,8.183205648189874,24.24350307946523,8.269060116576782,1.1395547243503072,1157,29,265,17,21,386,150,317,0.162,0.7609999999999999,0.077,-0.9726,2,0,2,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,0,16,17,5,2,19,0,28,11,2,4,1,63,63,23,0,10,15,0,4,2,0,1,7,0,4,0,17,11,0,2,11,2,1,9,14,10,0,1,3,4,26,7,35,57,13,33,0,2,0,2,1,7,3,11,17,172,43,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895422349670025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253733240925068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201436213768466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949800749812284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052453174787983683,0.0,0.0,0.12710609630969386,0.0,0.056584153887297775,0.13336078675551527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5389692770617559,0.0,0.07618688710912934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678361446031134,0.0,0.22140797033629847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287215624697715,0.09386694442220966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147039934995532,0.03432362159083045,0.0,0.14934695621292948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161900976152523,0.0,0.0,0.06486152601029739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317975537008915,0.0,0.1940929584520012,0.0,0.0,0.07416316145851776,0.35481655678275714,0.0,0.13038694342017002,0.05839391782805236,0.0,0.0,0.07220997115557166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920978501636774,0.0641918180515897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155843385956428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048294362626004575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986879365159336,0.06165155653829476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044517534326747626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629189252469749,0.06683678719471553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626025625424175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648819464048772,0.0,0.05980747263850963,0.0,0.0,0.06743634000302745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05057624547100901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504131632695475,0.0,0.0,0.06191801477090341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17458289333572818,0.0,0.0,0.05215554870482482,0.07661611819980027,0.0755082685144551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13381048960713354,0.07145874328350389,0.0,0.06839219779416249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27124578835895874,0.05214668987746632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665783799811642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon67401,2020/03/01,"Getting triggered too often I shoot myself in the foot and act like a moron to lower people's expectations and try to get fake diagnosis for depression, ADHD, Aspergers, or ADD. It's a way of victimizing myself. It's like I'm trying to mooch off alimony or welfare but I'm in no position for that bullshit. I also blame it on my dad dying a few months ago. People who know me aren't buying my bullshit and now everyone hates me. It's just raw delinquency. I have no respect from anyone left. I also got 3 misdemeanor charges for trespassing and IEC. They've been dismissed and expunged but it doesn't mean they don't exist. Hospitals, schools, government jobs, etc all can still access them. It still reveals my poor character. 

I used to be a decent student and got into a top 5 public university (if anyone cares about those rankings) so that just means there's even less tolerance for me backsliding like this. Where's a good place to start or a decent goal to focus on? I feel like all my past goals in life are unreachable now and I need to adjust my outlook. Things can't go back to the way they used to be, but at the same time I need to stay out of trouble and keep busy. I basically screwed up my life with no back up plan. I think I could have a dissociation disorder. Sometimes I rant at people but then forget about it. Then they come to me later to talk about it and I 100% think they're screwing with me. Then the next day I'll remember. 

If more context would help, I'm asking online specifically because my parents and family have become increasingly unsupportive and I can't trust too many people when I'm this vulnerable. Going online preserves my anonymity. I also feel vulnerable to grooming or other kinds of sexual exploitation. It's already happened once. I was too apathetic to care though so I'm not milking for pity here.

I also can't seem to get hired anywhere. At this point I don't have much dignity, integrity, or social inhibition left. I'm kind of getting used to people not caring anymore. I feel like I'll end up getting mugged and killed soon. Some female friends I knew said I'll end up becoming a gigilo or gay porn star soon. It was half joking, half cruel. 

(18M too btw, finished school with no diploma and a few community college credits)",3.8217686535293782,5.778339683972916,5.194583612958333,79.14518638277104,73.15349887133182,8.130046976999573,27.77432737477884,8.841846274778883,2.3344205844670856,1812,70,333,37,37,605,244,443,0.207,0.69,0.10300000000000001,-0.9939,3,0,0,1,0,0,48.0,0,0,4,5,30,28,7,0,14,0,20,8,1,4,2,65,60,36,2,7,16,2,3,5,1,1,2,1,0,0,19,20,1,1,13,1,3,5,13,12,0,2,7,4,39,16,47,49,11,52,0,2,0,4,14,21,2,11,28,212,58,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108263042233666,0.0,0.07455752214214181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281633377463012,0.2690476339379961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341349198339729,0.11762188715128112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863052788697301,0.0,0.0,0.12934920385403925,0.0,0.05127204405873016,0.18578348626291585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25726408448221083,0.0,0.0,0.0724524253586807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715416410616175,0.0,0.0,0.05424332391049217,0.0,0.07244292783639862,0.0,0.08729182600819155,0.0,0.09639616012089204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899115528231233,0.0,0.09380372856459214,0.05555317776998228,0.0,0.0,0.08036971994433205,0.0,0.0,0.07929044617916446,0.0,0.12758405885557364,0.12017492202048925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498237729427553,0.0,0.21971731228330368,0.0,0.09560212557978844,0.07054660885951279,0.13453924474471762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743772794907458,0.0,0.0,0.08304018926361398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05637646593126859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346516899244782,0.07475991217837764,0.09305410738625904,0.1751730868811002,0.04622408722334719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18276927195312215,0.0,0.11881729798001694,0.20545695761664676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527328853030477,0.0,0.18323863935205853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713497297922534,0.0,0.061829766573674824,0.1247314628006163,0.0,0.0,0.08945083789005509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957330212169069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933930513990365,0.0,0.08029152369709698,0.2915528282236025,0.0,0.08787596617175622,0.0,0.07951015782696738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527906066134692,0.0,0.08000688595286808,0.0,0.0,0.1702455247773715,0.0,0.07656964232527902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573849716711639,0.0,0.0,0.08318591650363881,0.0,0.0595327579455602,0.08964896505197004,0.1343390553186247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760359963553597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05587825864013205,0.10778725649936273,0.08263663052951115,0.0,0.04904461355831168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420893161090227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21792942051193312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13352356206384394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05974859514258912,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Supitscal,2020/03/01,"How long for antipsychotic drug REXULTI to start working? TL;DR: Friend had a mental slip leading to sudden enlightenment. He has been (questionably) diagnosed with schizophrenia, prescribed REXULTI for a full year even though it is harming his mental health. He wants to give it a reasonable try, but wants to be off it ASAP.

Please consider reading the rest of the post as any other information would be really valuable to me.

-

I'm posting this on behalf of my friend. Recently, he had what I would describe as a mental slip, which manifested as sudden and intense spiritual enlightenment. 

He describes this time period as the most meaningful and purposeful he has ever felt, and sees the experience almost entirely positively. Due to his change in personality, his family were worried and he relented to seeing a psychiatrist to ease their worries. He was then hospitalised against his will, and diagnosed with schizophrenia. 

My opinion is that his diagnosis is not very accurate. I will admit that after his slip, he has started believing in spiritual woo-woo (like astrology, numerology, butterfly effect), and I think that he gave them too much information about these abstract ideas, leading to the heavy diagnosis.

He has been prescribed REXULTI for about a month now, and it has done nothing short of make him miserable. He seemed overall healthy before, but is now experiencing depression  and complete hopelessness.

He is reaching his wits end as to whether he should continue the drug. His doctor said that he should use it for a full year, but that is the last thing he wants to do. I suggested he stick with it for at least a few months as I know mental health meds take time to start working.

How long would constitute a reasonable trial of the drug for him to then decide whether to continue with it or not?

Do you know of any resources or other useful information that could be helpful?

Thanks for your time, and sorry for the essay of a post.",8.325156423034331,9.313825200581396,8.155548172757474,65.76763565891474,61.52906976744186,11.901218161683278,37.60188261351053,11.58411153163022,4.846308028792913,1575,73,248,46,21,506,180,344,0.067,0.809,0.124,0.9669,0,0,3,0,0,1,44.0,0,2,2,5,10,9,0,1,19,0,31,8,0,10,1,60,54,27,0,9,9,0,1,1,2,7,8,1,0,1,21,13,0,0,18,1,0,2,2,4,0,0,10,5,22,5,47,33,7,40,0,3,2,0,43,8,0,7,28,175,43,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050183120733137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292207027288365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690614243820539,0.10182654123237048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560933404140896,0.0,0.09476099485655497,0.0,0.0,0.07216053078891793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784357372558152,0.1834662095784194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250706115721044,0.0,0.09248942082767446,0.0,0.0,0.3144339442848894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004924929919026,0.0,0.0,0.059694686818761465,0.0817532669891165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08840831494285926,0.08520157698238175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677831816623732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396536730043341,0.0,0.0,0.08670007679523925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19213797634261184,0.0,0.0,0.06057935140362228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020272484451571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934021854540268,0.07367120652642424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04415476929310208,0.0,0.0,0.15996570382619565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060328896235782636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039104717989797,0.0,0.3643243783763291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442798179133632,0.0,0.06643919753744487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672139268151656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891573394511353,0.0,0.09920935021143372,0.0,0.0,0.2596752090321559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012455198745248,0.0,0.0904037754233251,0.0,0.05789930508291553,0.18584998208084774,0.08923867258563997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597142759457932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14404122918997667,0.08227793623899422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117224647356868,0.1919128383113456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795399891248761,0.0,0.0,0.08320913270647445,0.0,0.0,0.06004400258274367,0.05791141729483301,0.08879722055940355,0.0,0.15810272053019578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06136162392587765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15611742392029826,0.0,0.07457240222241171,0.159924189320335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13159443909978427,0.18356916806823484,0.0,0.19260862212053614,0.0,0.0,0.11640263453078654
mentalhealth,rottingdreamSUV,2020/03/01,"I think I have a problem on my hands. I wrote this on another subreddit and I'm sorry to be annoying but I really need people to know.

WARNING: LONG READ 
Hi Reddit. I'm not giving my name or any hint of it for privacy reasons. I really don't anyone knowing me to find out I wrote this. For some background, I am a religious 14 year old living in a good country and home. 
I have a wonderful loving family and I am very fortunate. The only problems I have are with myself.
I cannot live with myself. Don't worry, I won't kill myself and I will never self harm, my faith in God won't let me do it. I think I have mental issues and nothing is really helping my mental state.
For one, I am really ugly. People say to me I'm not, or, I'll grow into my looks, but I know I'm ugly and accept it, but I hate the fact it is true. I get frustrated when I go out in public and see people prettier than me.It makes me angry and sad, and I don't stop thinking about my appearance. It keeps me up at night and I can't focus on anything else. Not school, not hobbies, not eating. This makes me slow at everything. Things I learn do not stay in my head and I have terrible memory.
For another, I think I have a mental condition of some kind. I may not have, heck, there's a high chance I don't but what I feel is so impulsive and  constant. Whenever I'm at school, every little thing annoys me and makes me angry. When someone slightly nudges me by accident, when the annoying girl in front laughs too loud, when someone trashes my table. I've even considered beating people up, but never acted on those urges. Something else is how I feel detached to everything. Whenever I am talking to a friend and they turn to talk to someone else who called them, I feel totally abandoned. I don't want to, but I can't help any of these problematic feelings I get. I'm not a loner, but I'm not popular either (which I have no problem with, I like it this way) and I am on great terms with many of my peers. I feel so sorry for my friends when I lash out at them, and I apologise most of the time (which I should do all the time). I always feel like crying and breaking down, but I know I don't have depression or what an edgy teen would claim to have. I am always changing emotions, of which I don't intend to. Happy one moment, agitated the next. I don't know what to do and it's becoming too much to deal with. Sometimes I wish I was not born with emotions. My brain is like another person sharing my body. It's like its only purpose is to make me feel insecure and angry. I always wake up in the middle of the night and stare into space, begging my brain to shut up. It is very much like a noisy, manipulative roommate with no respect (you know, like the ones that don't flush the toilet and bring home noisy party folks). It feels like a nightmare. I know I'm not a special person or amazing or superior in any way but whenever I am near anyone, there's always this side of me that says ""you're better than everybody else"". I know I'm not! I feel like a disgusting person when these ugly thoughts come out, but I can't help it. I curse internally at others for outshining me but I don't want to. I want to look up to people for being great, not hate or envy them. My confidence sucks so I don't know where this all comes from.
I told my parents only the part about getting mad and the ugliness but nothing else like my constantly shifting feelings. They gave me a wonderful talk about loving myself and my talents and how I should not compare myself to others. Mum offered to move schools (if I could find a semi-selective one near us, which I can't) and for a counsellor. 
I'm going to ask for a counsellor visit (I'm very nervous to as they don't recommend it), but, if anyone knows anything about psychology and can tell me what the hell is happening in my brain, it would be appreciated.
Thank you for reading and please don't think I'm an attention-seeking teenager. I am not edgy, I do not have the ""I am 13 and I am the darkness"" syndrome, nor do I want to cause drama or harm to anybody. A lot of other people have it worse than me, I know that. I want help. I just want to sleep again.
Thanks, I love you all.",1.9660166137454669,3.7705676106604926,3.958327489428304,86.64564942589277,77.99188876013905,7.032363696558367,23.49052685437389,7.957251820313856,1.2486184075484186,3260,106,680,55,77,1110,335,863,0.184,0.621,0.196,0.9708,1,0,1,0,0,1,112.0,1,3,6,2,23,55,11,2,34,0,70,12,8,10,8,162,152,63,1,18,40,2,11,9,2,8,0,3,2,5,41,43,1,3,34,3,0,11,41,22,0,4,6,18,121,33,93,133,13,79,2,3,4,3,47,39,3,17,33,465,162,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341174582701393,0.0,0.0,0.1001636648419885,0.1544485878674928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299004661697607,0.0,0.08080588748988059,0.0,0.045899403751736664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054224176509690886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043422624883867486,0.0,0.05453609852453967,0.0,0.16442667300826885,0.050133893764388655,0.0,0.0,0.050436512999442636,0.0519384965853008,0.08458605617174292,0.0,0.1061136075631052,0.0,0.03920024670761189,0.0,0.05393114430016969,0.0,0.05061722209059323,0.04228748404818557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050238856239378925,0.20507272036470214,0.11045584289034716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032428343096229696,0.0,0.041366643178873966,0.0,0.08825108233504234,0.0,0.046284621261404035,0.0,0.24825100322845875,0.1052254909425405,0.0,0.0,0.08974819475753637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586499677237403,0.0,0.07695403222194487,0.04709866131506098,0.05580632204095794,0.04118053598741104,0.0,0.10826002500532213,0.0,0.0,0.04341663312001103,0.0522650524632484,0.0,0.0969469562791199,0.050388055738097084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163570137007954,0.05187405625529976,0.09849731005640196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05124488773122295,0.0,0.04363998927302416,0.054318954233893366,0.05112734492099049,0.2968088742996404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050205376838070026,0.0,0.2158784099306815,0.04920845285359765,0.08670773640825645,0.043449618414577056,0.0824588334831651,0.0,0.0,0.041740819559328235,0.13293685231111446,0.0,0.13109147564107382,0.04977701669658049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14843577255264673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05218272344164556,0.07218441732758363,0.03640507017744889,0.07573382125992667,0.0,0.052215599139160726,0.09214909244208737,0.0,0.0942204817724322,0.0,0.05151942003974565,0.0,0.1330785665864303,0.1120222636071064,0.0,0.0,0.05451680777131423,0.053167656154971724,0.0,0.20422756408551965,0.12860976239808092,0.0,0.05389415739424313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14093862774101354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822129247525248,0.0,0.12581210357716166,0.0504802630227696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780883822650861,0.0,0.14906744788579998,0.03912423909984535,0.0,0.051219254002262286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04913281732085662,0.0,0.12480010088150988,0.03779754625000276,0.0485585442532854,0.10992094926043104,0.0,0.052331252929657866,0.0,0.0410475912226861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838779408434955,0.04291325651437697,0.09040450492143973,0.0,0.0,0.06523620845975024,0.15729802846000918,0.0,0.03897781944875472,0.05725813065369985,0.0,0.0,0.046914631305051364,0.0,0.0,0.0534038287949536,0.0,0.0,0.05905807863466491,0.0,0.0,0.1215313911665438,0.1737533692541723,0.0779423978222305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645954073541583,0.0,0.10648798468859852,0.0,0.04986075211416681,0.05003440413568396,0.06975471145229578,0.0,0.0,0.031617089987672195
mentalhealth,sing_bulimia_queenie,2020/03/01,"Asking for suggestion: Mental health organization for donation of funds! Hi,

I posted a few days ago about this but lost that account and thread. 

Anyway, I’d like to request for everyone’s assistance in helping me find an organzation where I can donate funds. I put up some activities a few weeks back and I have accumulated over $1k for donation. 

I’m bulimic - eating disorders and depression are close to my heart; hence, organizations (regardless of country as long as we can help them) focused on these mental illnesses are my priority. 

Please feel free to comment your suggestions. 

Thank you!",5.979619047619046,8.59846086666667,7.053333333333335,65.27333333333334,68.9047619047619,11.142857142857142,33.57142857142857,10.980518767755715,4.713857142857143,481,23,75,17,9,161,83,105,0.10099999999999999,0.6990000000000001,0.19899999999999998,0.8986,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,2,1,1,4,5,0,0,3,0,5,4,1,0,0,10,10,6,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,2,0,7,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,11,4,16,9,3,13,0,2,0,0,12,6,0,1,6,48,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18481832347812768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949147707801364,0.0,0.0,0.16031985983894284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13446208909552432,0.0,0.17957652140108474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389534441515792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21334253492964528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992259998957549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542138554116433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19056074130847905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216205382751548,0.0,0.24706769362517486,0.27949973705334635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186017282396384,0.0,0.0,0.18451159974907624,0.0,0.0,0.2275970274182468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4202280380977268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288650064324645,0.0,0.0,0.1996806694088082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20959515906061826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919542729744874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16724219045807664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Learning_Environment,2020/03/01,"Misdiagnosis and loopholes  Hey guys this is my first time posting here, I wanted to talk about my misdiagnosis. I made stuff up to get a diagnosis of schizophrenia while I was pretty sure I had ADHD I was a child I didn’t know what to say so excuse me for doing that I was a child. I always struggled because of attention I usually daydream most of the day, I go into fantasy worlds where I fight monsters and stuff or always have some sort of super powers, I get yelled a lot because of my attention problem because I can’t pay attention to normal conversations, either I’m fidgeting my hands or making weird things with my hands or I’m just into my fantasy world or completely distracted with my phone or something else. When I study I can’t read without checking my phone and losing track of time and forgetting that I was studying, or I just stare into the book or paper for minutes to an hour and forget what I’m supposed to do. I can’t handle myself in public because I’m always awkward and doing random things, when I go out my headphones are in my ears because I can’t pay attention to anything or can’t ignore boredom, I can’t go a day without being so bored and it gets so bad that I need to smoke weed to pass time, I can’t handle patience or wait for something without going insane about my thoughts. And I have really bad mood swings that last for minutes to hours. I forget what to say when I have a normal conversation. And I’m really speech is really disorganized, I jump from one thing to another and people say I’m really rude for it, when someone is talking I usually interrupt them and be really awkward because of how fast is my self awareness I just realize my actions right away. When I was a child I was really smart and on top of my class, in high school I was taking AP/IB classes but struggled with my attention but still managed to pass and still be on top. In sophomore year I was hospitalized for suicide, I was going through seasonal depression but the doctors didn’t know it because I was never diagnosed with any mental illness before, when they asked questions I told them I hear voices which was a lie, it’s my own voice talking to me in my head, usually people with schizophrenia hear things outside their head. Furthermore I told them I see stuff that are not there, which was also a lie, I wear glasses and usually have migraines and when I get a headache I see colors and shapes because of the headache, it last few seconds and goes away it’s not related to psychosis. And than they put me on antipsychotics which didn’t do anything and gave my bad side effects, I was still convinced that I had schizophrenia, after I did my research on adhd and schizophrenia I found out the truth, I just wanted to get diagnosed with schizophrenia because it felt good, it was so dumb to think that way, I was literally brainless to think getting a diagnosis of schizophrenia will make me feel good. I was 14 years old and didn’t know how to think probably I made so many mistakes and got myself into so many loopholes. I stopped the antipsychotics when I found out that I was just a dumbass trying to be diagnosed with schizophrenia. Everything was a challenge for me and so many people reward me and put in high places and it made me feel good so I guess I wanted the misdiagnosis to take on the challenge. I’m now 18 years old still trying to convince every psychiatrists that I don’t have schizophrenia but I can’t and it’s on medical records, I can’t get the right ADHD treatment because of the misdiagnosis and I can’t live like this anymore, I don’t know what do, I blame myself for causing this loophole, I deserved what I got I guess. I just feel so awful because I’m not getting the tight treatment, I’m emotionally burnt out and so angry with everything that I can’t control my words and impulsivity toward people. I don’t know what to do next, it’s all because of my lying issue and my struggles to keep up with things, I forget what to do everyday, I go to the bathroom and forget why I went there. All I’m saying is that I deserve what I got, I’m an awful person. I don’t know how to tell this to the new psychiatrist that I will see in few weeks, I don’t know where to start",7.079665646853151,6.422438963942309,7.484785839160839,75.07953234265736,64.40865384615384,10.159790209790213,35.25524475524475,9.457814108942452,3.1825735576923067,3366,136,631,54,44,1107,297,832,0.134,0.8079999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9958,1,0,3,0,1,1,53.0,0,0,6,11,40,33,3,6,28,2,66,13,6,11,5,140,137,67,1,8,26,0,7,1,0,2,7,11,0,6,46,48,0,6,25,4,3,13,27,19,0,3,39,23,113,13,93,92,9,97,0,2,5,0,35,39,1,17,44,445,159,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791742652569106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039741753791376684,0.12405278631845472,0.0,0.0,0.03379488256933532,0.05211043244289868,0.0,0.0,0.0492849301480512,0.0,0.0,0.08179090140939044,0.0,0.0464589118890407,0.0,0.09338177510188253,0.0,0.12448187842812053,0.36352955138029,0.0,0.04228750861077985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05105132794547256,0.0,0.0,0.05210515387873538,0.0,0.05573812220154272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640994248378628,0.0,0.04280296332454065,0.15132072688930712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05086580890969415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041514506366149034,0.05590114307615815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04187089751726845,0.0,0.08932685227226025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753831458099532,0.0,0.04771580995149164,0.0,0.0,0.04227126515574356,0.0,0.10897787029205616,0.0,0.0,0.20771224665392102,0.0,0.16945978291412106,0.12504756510547554,0.119238934645035,0.0,0.10949116444960706,0.04920670529071682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200455999203477,0.0,0.11202167088089643,0.0,0.0,0.10501278935680844,0.0,0.0,0.09788080480057694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05186955666670485,0.0,0.044171955423220485,0.0,0.0,0.19118077891877208,0.08101750215480978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02427888238172076,0.0,0.04388234657336846,0.0,0.0,0.0555969451447416,0.0,0.04224963506219412,0.0,0.14107024637451246,0.06634473237555442,0.15115137738918286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050063341237523165,0.05008172884267716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03684884354569524,0.03832850365515003,0.0479965622094968,0.052852100928390634,0.0,0.09738276437156657,0.0,0.0,0.10429487098121436,0.0,0.033675194523223366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378113821330206,0.04339249990872215,0.05192158668203887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04759488769823847,0.05055854606792562,0.05358053225204396,0.047552217478310274,0.0,0.0999161119313086,0.055670726131362015,0.0,0.04970929902943234,0.0,0.19101860667781745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487996980299202,0.0,0.1580805402542554,0.0,0.05029485396883479,0.11880347641749285,0.0,0.051843610465712515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04210713296668247,0.07651658746370435,0.0,0.0,0.035174978856559264,0.0,0.15874868202020445,0.04154795635662216,0.0,0.15585867960233346,0.1706695780176677,0.054359194622419255,0.0,0.046837751089219504,0.0,0.07473018989237969,0.11983092686459106,0.043436363880822906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507857472396656,0.09552928335283936,0.0,0.039452954317039816,0.08693415043122774,0.0,0.0,0.09497302988497948,0.0,0.06748044090813553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21893183395268306,0.0,0.08793570082376198,0.03944625307585347,0.039863013765059255,0.0,0.0,0.046068551412165634,0.0448427754952992,0.0,0.0,0.14371507981007353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960074953829584
mentalhealth,WigglyNoodleStrand,2020/03/01,"Addiction to pain Not gonna go in all my issues but I’ve listened to so much songs that made me sad and now I don’t get affected by any down song anymore. I miss the feeling of pain from a song but now it’s all numb.

I’m just gonna say this straight out and not correct grammar.",1.2428571428571438,2.2904812222222226,2.997015873015872,96.01742857142858,78.04761904761905,6.309841269841268,25.29841269841269,6.742157984588678,0.6382279365079362,219,8,55,2,5,73,50,63,0.259,0.6759999999999999,0.065,-0.9218,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,1,4,0,2,3,14,10,5,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,3,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,6,4,0,8,7,3,7,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,31,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261440474920557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20344872118477247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967004247382732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15127146920794735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15630617619936962,0.0,0.17002759740025514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122601462103481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830858702076346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21992746698014992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.636684903276959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379153389048065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,optimalpessimist,2020/03/01,"Covid 19 and mental health facilities I just visited a mental health facility in Kirkland, WA very close to the most recent outbreak. All staff and visitors were asked to wear face masks. None of the patients were given them because the metal in the nose piece is contraband. 

My SO was highly medicated but definitely aware of the disparity. My SO repeated to me some vague excuse that they gave them out for a bacterial or mold or some kind of thing ( the words Covid or coronavirus were not mentioned) coming from another facility nearby. 

She asked me how I was eating and I told her I stocked up last night on a lot of frozen fruits and vegetables. She was concerned that I was eating fast food without her around, but I didn't have the heart to tell her the truth that the virus had hit near us and I wanted to be prepared for quarantine. I didn't want to spread fear on the floor. She already expressed that she isn't safe in a mixed space.

This is just one story, one life. This is not about my feelings or how I handled the situation. The big question is: how do we treat all voluntary and involuntary patients facing a pandemic?",5.0540277777777805,6.643032458333334,5.572222222222227,79.15750000000003,69.32407407407408,8.91851851851852,29.24074074074073,9.354420925462401,2.5673851851851848,905,34,169,19,16,291,132,216,0.048,0.885,0.066,0.5998,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,2,0,3,0,9,5,0,1,17,0,18,14,5,3,3,38,28,17,0,2,11,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,7,11,5,1,2,0,0,2,7,1,0,2,13,3,26,4,24,13,8,21,0,0,0,0,22,14,0,9,5,123,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16876376859674422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16036206479600254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361415031036568,0.285940710504213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322565357967988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317369890648215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31297431064044035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17209051154527882,0.07732678689082466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18492543762020547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3251181730511616,0.0,0.18122462339580486,0.0,0.16158057937533346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15925467585566233,0.0,0.12465962496469725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802007667249028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001693514777826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540624476727044,0.3082380655568585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351590005247028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20726075271275354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17131833632162793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510014560828889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190147007396267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13366891565891226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160092655275588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613265001184264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839578249986616,0.0,0.0,0.126184545252806,0.1804059813273685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742055707635526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,THETANK-MATT,2020/03/01,"I hate myself and I don’t know why I don’t know why but I just hate myself that’s all there is to it. And I have a sneaking suspicion that everyone else I know hates me. My “friends” there nice to me when I’m around them but I just feel like they’re just being polite or something really just hate me as much as I hate me. I don’t know if it’s paranoia or something but I just feel like they probably talk shit behind my back but I don’t know I don’t have no evidence or nothing it’s just a gut feeling. They’ve said things like “Matt we love you ” but I just feel like they’re being fake or trying to manipulate me or something. I just feel like I’m not a good person. I don’t talk about this kind of stuff with people even online I’ve never opened myself this way. I try to live a healthy lifestyle you know I eat healthy and working out lifting weights is pretty much all I live for. It’s pathetic the one thing keeping myself from just ending it is lifting and the prospect of getting gains and getting strong. Outside of that I just hate life and I hate myself. It makes me so angry too I just get bouts of anger where I just lose control of myself. On top of that I think I’m starting to become an alcoholic and I’ve developed a full on nicotine addiction. Drinking and smoking is the one thing besides lifting is the only thing that really numbs the pain, those little moments where I just feel numbed are really just the only thing (again besides lifting) that keeps me going it really goes a long way because in those little moments of bliss just lets me forget about this huge burden I carry. Everyday just feels painful to me. I can’t even look myself in the mirror any more. I’m a pathetic monster. I don’t want to talk about it to anyone because as I’ve mentioned I suspect that my friends secretly hate me too so that makes it hard for me to open up like that, plus I just feel like it would be a burden to them. I’m just too nervous to talk about it. I feel like no one really cares about me and I don’t blame them because I don’t care about be neither. I just don’t know what to do, I despise myself the man I see in the mirror is pathetic and weak. It’s a huge burden I carry and it’s starting to interfere greatly with my life. It’s painful to me it hurts that I hate myself so much but I don’t know what to do about it I feel like I’ve reached a dead end. If it wasn’t for my passion for weight lifting I would’ve killed myself by now I really would’ve. Even then I still think about it but it’s just a thought I entertain, no actual urges to do it. If I died I feel like it wouldn’t affect anyone like they might talk about it for a day at best but they probably wouldn’t care, don’t blame them neither. I don’t know what to do, I guess I just have to wait until I die to be relieved of this pain, death must be such a relief especially for an individual such as myself, not a care in the world. I don’t even know why I hate myself so much I mean my so called “friends” say they like me sure but those are just words, and words are useless. I can just have this gut feeling that they secretly hate me. Life just feels so cold and empty to me. What do I do? Nothing that’s the answer fuckin live with it I guess. 

Tldr: I hate myself, everyone else probably hates me, no one cares about me, I’m angry about it and I can’t talk about it because the only people I can talk about it with are the people who probably hate me.",1.9898542805100163,3.5006687297668044,3.4282956666441784,91.76911556365113,77.06584362139918,6.371548719332568,22.650408149497398,7.068036841664632,0.5713663495918508,2700,78,604,29,61,887,228,729,0.253,0.5820000000000001,0.165,-0.9982,0,2,5,0,0,0,47.0,1,2,9,7,62,66,19,1,29,0,51,22,3,5,5,122,121,45,5,8,43,0,16,12,3,5,12,2,0,2,57,24,5,5,31,2,0,1,28,34,0,4,3,21,108,32,70,106,11,41,0,3,2,3,32,21,2,11,29,417,165,1,0.0,0.0,0.039527974431406133,0.044157475892286406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04328855316741213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02754544217536859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056645418839291535,0.0,0.0,0.03605889264240384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031146583371074368,0.0,0.098768230328355,0.04473565102407903,0.0,0.0,0.04250850656693393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0413611145486205,0.0,0.20649263175340052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04543087903667837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02612299357340926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407758394695533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039680420548384734,0.0,0.041447709955946765,0.0676750648386834,0.0,0.07175251646372333,0.0,0.0,0.10701521966186177,0.0,0.0,0.0774103622804128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662533993165828,0.2314997304226017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388441390009647,0.0,0.06348807767991464,0.0,0.02302047083477133,0.03397447790817265,0.0,0.04465796449329763,0.08924376443305224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03628538446183077,0.5598775008085142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043362468521636485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720071177277779,0.044813843879511706,0.042180724676646415,0.22261016590073704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04142008901433262,0.08583167349765221,0.23746999541348054,0.08119522751627083,0.10730251577968232,0.03584650042913113,0.034014805166255026,0.04531580882015592,0.0,0.0,0.036558210845099706,0.0,0.05407608638798362,0.0,0.0,0.04412286575664838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04297042302844408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910616668806916,0.0,0.0312406938812483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773312317871388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979154865599904,0.0924198247761175,0.17240479158596225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424519858586252,0.03536824235527744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04120912402425149,0.1746891056474148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569493321564706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03853044424460487,0.03221196561114623,0.0,0.0,0.03227800622551651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04157878640740637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355040209625393,0.0,0.0,0.05734065470565251,0.0,0.032348112410451865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04636963385146713,0.0,0.0,0.038176388440037665,0.0,0.0,0.2279000972014163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455180159664976,0.05190916790929968,0.0,0.03215720810859007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05500177665035108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02389146499939136,0.06430349215782158,0.0,0.09865069513538577,0.0,0.0,0.10965098726304827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029488821696349195,0.0,0.0,0.08632281658323206,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xamuuse,2020/03/01,"[14f]I self harm, though I am not depressed im pretty sure I have a long history of self harm, I am currently 14 and female. I go back to maybe 10-11? Where I'd cut on my wrists. Don't remember the reason though. Last year I self harmed, quite a bit and missed a lot of P.E despite being my favourite subject. I was going through a rough patch and felt so painfully numb, so it made me feel. In the end now, self harm doesnt hurt me. Cutting myself doesnt even make me feel anything anymore. I feel numb to it because im so used to the pain. Right now, nothing bad is happening apart from feeling useless, and having a friend die a while ago. I sometimes bite off skin near my knuckles, and it feels more like a stim then anything else? I like the power of being able to harm myself, and inflict pain to my own degree. I like being in control because no one else ever takes me seriously. I don't flaunt my scars, i do everything to hide them. What can i describe this phenomenon as?",2.444552941176472,4.145308020000002,3.571235294117649,90.4128235294118,76.3,6.105882352941178,25.264705882352942,6.794906146795322,0.871558823529412,764,27,162,7,17,247,125,200,0.24,0.647,0.113,-0.9824,2,0,0,0,0,1,29.0,0,0,1,3,11,23,2,0,11,0,15,7,2,5,2,22,29,14,1,0,1,0,8,3,1,0,5,0,0,4,5,6,0,1,8,0,0,2,6,18,0,1,3,8,25,5,17,23,4,22,0,4,0,0,6,8,0,1,15,98,30,0,0.1098909399163598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741168779594962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898228382061442,0.0,0.0,0.1808617604725274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449934963277438,0.09175434468253364,0.13397699400436966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997244488475832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325203333248128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464890552518904,0.0,0.11404944609126247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18359955880539106,0.0,0.09733075540687176,0.0,0.0,0.07258192940861789,0.0994026465293894,0.0,0.0,0.09876289098811376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27782080537505943,0.07850610943349545,0.10551253552034467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490146758311691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490710718434285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717619524763464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176405239989424,0.0,0.23740214497927056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957578298020423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16106148731205816,0.0,0.0,0.09725002375976706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342534737968963,0.0,0.10398146440062828,0.07335305571130325,0.0,0.110400219492214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544332062478627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446494488720395,0.0,0.3507951238750584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179859240097052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116882541344214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129861885442158,0.0,0.0,0.12448501296676605,0.0938462622546766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4585608666249124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868494948133764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035709103653148,0.0,0.08262431072088848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21593458104209293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094910489076199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07076616239014545
mentalhealth,Power_Egg,2020/03/01,"Rapid Mood Swings for no Apparent Reason 18F, no prior history of mental health issues. I have troubles identifying what I’m feeling sometimes and I generally don’t have much empathy so I’ll try my best to explain what’s been going on. 
The past week I have been having some big mood swings; I’ve been very happy one moment, and it could be five minutes later and I am feeling very tired and depressed, or angry. To give some context, here’s what my week has generally been like. 

I’m a grade 12 student who’s taking some IB courses so i’m naturally stressed all the time (I also tend to be quite high strung), and I had a busy week with some tests and extracurriculars. I was extra stressed as I was waiting to hear back from one of my universities for early admissions. All this being said, I didn’t feel like I was any more overwhelmed than usual. 

I’ve noted that I usually hit the “lows” when i’m not focusing on any tasks and i’m left alone with my thoughts. I also found myself zoning out more and feeling very energetic one second, and then absolutely exhausted the next. I think I also experienced some anxiety that came out of nowhere. I hit a crazy high after finishing a moderately stressful task, and then went to a party with my peers where I did not drink but was extremely talkative and excited as though I were drunk (I’m usually pretty introverted). I hit these highs maybe two or three times a month, lasting about 30 minutes each time, but they generally just result in me being more talkative and aloof than usually. 

I did some research on bipolar disorder and borderline personality disorder, and I don’t feel certain that either of those are what I’m experiencing. My mood swings feel too frequent to be BD, and I don’t have the impulsiveness and other symptoms associated with BPD. I have spoken to a few close friends about this, some who do deal with mental health issues, and they think that I’m likely just going through a typical rough teenager patch, but I feel like it might be something more. 

Today was the first day I was mostly stable- I worked out early in the morning which I think may have played a role, and I was generally quite pleasant all day, with the exception of two little lapses of sadness and a bit of random anxiety around midday. 

I’m not great at talking about emotions and I’m kind of known for being kind of emotionless, so if anyone could help me out, that would be great :)",6.50778325123153,6.946928103448279,7.021564039408865,74.2369827586207,65.3793103448276,9.990640394088672,32.51970443349754,9.871247098662263,3.1028980295566515,1936,74,353,39,28,635,234,464,0.102,0.78,0.11699999999999999,0.8388,1,1,2,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,2,5,18,27,0,4,18,0,43,8,0,2,4,86,79,38,0,4,13,0,8,4,1,3,6,2,0,1,19,34,2,1,15,3,0,4,9,9,0,9,21,12,38,15,47,42,22,54,0,4,0,0,14,20,0,14,34,242,57,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849375467271273,0.0,0.18182347186129355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030771970483524,0.0,0.1159555842954108,0.0,0.0,0.0529928959064348,0.0,0.0,0.0674675969727233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0582764743997109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953507661512788,0.0,0.08274112337410885,0.0,0.09545262858370936,0.0,0.0,0.08668155034607672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102147701760314,0.0,0.0,0.09775428322827852,0.07813434218440954,0.06527629554275224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17371976603287526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424361717970157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852515632842843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682456607241604,0.10828626010743857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446543376800125,0.0,0.08309788757926281,0.058553802172535675,0.0,0.0,0.07270298067784497,0.08614440070609693,0.0,0.0,0.16711359275147916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067798517549399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611186990584556,0.0854188486924438,0.0,0.05079925621029869,0.2402232932512989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15820645336983555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784356778359845,0.0,0.06177752664803009,0.0,0.0,0.08234413881703465,0.0,0.0,0.1481052131629658,0.07595972151033785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613946844467842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527534301043236,0.08039934036191818,0.0,0.0,0.06049344592122796,0.0,0.05571307285256771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060164746301528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540682078591476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234844569322077,0.0,0.06617536330146119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710388111024985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122023324490278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792292784303308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209196658518599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583454857942037,0.07495650207497448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604455005578258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877299470949296,0.05698332057519201,0.060915712290494924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568612191277966,0.07446155585102257,0.06016739276921156,0.13257818747921474,0.08710742695363559,0.0718383848640959,0.0,0.0,0.051455236529724016,0.0,0.14806818579304504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3338801332154137,0.18759969258207806,0.0,0.0,0.1823782513390316,0.0,0.0,0.07025645290971856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517473753673082,0.0,0.0,0.05383778750080112,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,needsmypills,2020/03/01,"Magna Cum Laude Graduate -top 10% School Help I have been depressed since high school, attempted to be placed on several SSRI medications with no avail, between junior and senior year of high school I had not experienced immense depression, but still experienced anxiety. Throughout my initial college years before I transferred to my ivy league institution I experienced the typical depressive period with anxiety mixed in throughout. However, now that I am 22, I experience anxiety every single day, anxiety attacks which hurt me to my core. I fidget, I hyperventilate, sweat, look around at everyone, shake my legs immensely, and feel like my heart will explode. My depressive issues have been intense, but I dont feel suicidal.... i just feel immense anxiety and depressed as that my anxiety negatively effects me. My parents did not see how my anxiety could effect me and thus I cannot see a psych without their OK since im on their insurance. I have been suffering quietly and its been hurting me, I have terrible sleep, depression (which has been diagnosed previously), and anxiety (i only get 12 .5 xanax tablets a month). My parents dont undetstand what I am feeling, I know i am not severe, but I want to know if i should truly seek a psychiatrist and a therapist for how I feel. I want to know that going behind my parents backs will be worth it, their negative perspective behind things has made me shy away from talking to them.",9.010672268907566,9.207062607843136,9.19043417366947,61.61338235294119,60.17647058823529,13.560224089635856,42.135854341736696,12.785403640627713,6.0129383753501395,1155,61,179,40,14,382,151,255,0.24,0.6729999999999999,0.087,-0.991,4,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,4,4,7,14,1,1,5,1,25,7,4,6,0,37,41,14,1,5,9,3,5,1,0,3,3,1,0,0,9,10,0,0,10,0,1,2,10,12,0,0,8,12,41,2,22,27,1,21,0,9,3,0,9,10,0,1,10,126,50,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5046186698104771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340183149987459,0.0,0.09380369935326988,0.07746855353657199,0.06340228711604683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016255840431987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583306996619036,0.0,0.0,0.05317621901380348,0.0,0.4261067411340214,0.08368940527155001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19327171204113966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947132590704927,0.07878864202514675,0.0,0.08065615260302497,0.0,0.0,0.2084569235828632,0.05890538699170868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043078982174398976,0.0,0.04686069364411345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770877334885103,0.055267396675989726,0.17423504501680154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17653812275426506,0.0,0.08906482134687932,0.08606089406993664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594422365918554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04028301876987028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924086721338847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802027695274202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306405884118924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581425637779788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271023048081671,0.0,0.0,0.2746673137374949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614722119370387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503445399092784,0.13141084489827642,0.0,0.0,0.18629983744848336,0.0,0.1364141411046965,0.0,0.08251387355916605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584813127896158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019164979927498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627366394936929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573582768862914,0.0547789903963254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726739562202863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948302790440998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619576518540556
mentalhealth,TooJewForYousWife,2020/03/01,"Am I faking? First time poster, sorry if this has been addressed before. Sometimes I worry that I’m faking my mental illness. I feel like I don’t have a good reason for being the way I am (no real trauma). But counseling and medication have really helped me, so maybe I really do have a problem?",3.128793103448277,5.066595672413797,5.41331034482759,76.91272413793105,75.0344827586207,7.398620689655173,21.944827586206884,8.238735603445708,1.4855544827586202,231,6,40,4,5,81,45,58,0.258,0.653,0.08800000000000001,-0.8564,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,3,0,10,2,0,1,0,7,12,4,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,1,8,2,1,10,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21415957065564495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725603589721418,0.1797989223077167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21407730779668693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21109569338005185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686945603548066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295723247083802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528445318520181,0.0,0.0,0.2535392605815962,0.2536323822091059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408220018968618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2864648367040223,0.3224629379319247,0.25876705752583085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489161280418208,0.2817330863325533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675555456203107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19977040266082735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555913804329443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fortnite69Pro,2020/03/01,I don’t know what problem I have. I don’t really know what I have. Everyday I get this intense feeling of deep loneliness sadness that makes my chest tighten and makes a heavy feeling in my heart. For some reason I feel like no one likes me but rather I feel like they only tolerate me. Sometimes I wonder what life would be like if I didn’t exist and how happy people would be if I’m not around. I don’t wanna exist but I don’t want to die.,1.8820212765957445,3.4490886382978765,3.6797340425531937,89.60875000000001,77.51063829787232,6.402127659574468,22.388297872340427,7.1686216300943375,0.6837489361702129,348,10,75,4,8,117,59,94,0.133,0.653,0.214,0.6896,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,1,0,3,7,0,0,1,0,11,3,2,4,0,26,23,7,1,8,6,0,4,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,8,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,1,4,16,5,6,18,1,4,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,4,5,51,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17279250533327498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014478996434686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925765158054567,0.27733393535121365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141062021231187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066258738895132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300125677384213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133474738678501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710043777260675,0.3793149894710798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591300442379695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152897500782446,0.14762380738178088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13456633356540434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18573001619806612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434712404521545,0.19956984580828188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919724781333184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11448676847254052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104960375815838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27576989847807826,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Finfan13-1,2020/03/01,"Help with sorting my emotions I've had a hard time recently because my crush wasn't interested in me. For me, it's been on the rare occasion I feel a special connection with a girl so I have little experience with dating. My last relationship was 3 years ago and it's kind of taken its toll on me. It's nothing wrong with me (I think), I consider myself an all around good person. It just hurts me on the days when I need a hug or someone to talk too.

Any advice in how to feel better?",2.6032920792079217,3.977860752475252,4.638700495049509,84.29191212871288,75.13861386138616,7.822277227722773,25.496287128712872,8.472884824447931,1.6239198019801986,380,13,81,7,8,131,72,101,0.08199999999999999,0.753,0.165,0.8589,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,7,0,5,1,0,1,1,15,10,5,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,3,14,6,14,5,1,15,0,1,0,1,5,7,0,2,8,53,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095316912857128,0.1900730676719011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458150049340832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19088194609819634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071028140490393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896397342793038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382851076613267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24119703439558984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20974685588989447,0.0,0.0,0.21683744090885748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798478540396422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19208090691200386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14372322894030146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295442752808829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232885766614527,0.0,0.17478337810781494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149081947120824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899195070162034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20574466853143167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18722590839933104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117168618214628,0.2302100754663397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18167992709251365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17234509945075555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13739361173855255,0.0,0.0,0.1250317859818218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344379091970629,0.0,0.1380813932824819
mentalhealth,tendoronii,2020/03/01,"Life expectations - feeling hopeless I don't really know how to express my feelings, I hope you can understand what I'm trying to say (English is not my first language)

So, I'll be 30 in two days and I am not excited as other people might be. I'm struggling with depression, I don't have a job, I'm living in my father's house again and, to be honest, I have no willing to live. My birthday gives me anxiety, because I never thought I was going to be like this at the age of 30. When I was a child I used to think that I was going to be successful, that I was going to be settled but the reality is so different... People say it is just a number, and I know it, but the only thing I can see is my failure. Nothing motivates me, I mean, I need money, I need to get out of this house, but every time I look for jobs it seems that I won't be capable of doing even the easiest thing. And I really want to do it, but the only thing I see in the future is me laying in the couch. I feel hopeless and stupid to think about me this way. I'm currently seeing a therapist, clearly not doing any difference. I have suicidal thoughts every day but I haven't done anything yet. I just feel like people doesn't understand what is like to feel this way so they just think that I am lazy or seeking for attention, which is crazy because all I want to do is disappear. Last time a told my mom that I think I need antidepressants she implied that I am an addict (last time I took those pills was a year ago). Right now I can't see a psychiatrist because is too expensive so I am in a vicious cycle.
I am writing this right now because I don't feel comfortable talking to anyone about it, I just wanted to get this off my chest, but if you guys have some advice it would be great for me to read it. Thanks in advance.",5.019771428571431,4.41535404,6.478285714285715,80.42200000000003,68.6,9.702857142857145,30.923809523809524,9.23628265651192,2.445300952380953,1395,49,298,24,21,480,173,375,0.13,0.769,0.10099999999999999,-0.9138,4,0,0,0,0,2,41.0,0,2,1,4,18,16,2,1,16,0,48,4,1,3,3,59,92,20,1,10,15,2,6,3,0,4,3,2,1,2,27,7,0,0,20,1,2,6,12,6,0,2,10,13,51,10,35,70,2,38,0,3,5,0,15,11,0,6,22,215,78,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465005790635232,0.0,0.08484258523995289,0.07696349104433634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904272479963349,0.0,0.06641947829958067,0.0,0.0,0.06070877088113962,0.0,0.07144806130219339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117063652526335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198750854517793,0.0,0.07478065884663804,0.0,0.0,0.1814234416905228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885023509094801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0573458770750617,0.0,0.1463045106994352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634023848703227,0.062026481493340335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385173392457776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907230332250734,0.08328868465954634,0.14803080476277072,0.0,0.0,0.09572283831578368,0.0,0.08596857683454892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623498645542113,0.0,0.20036453468962612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17231717475850494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543147413789588,0.14154492396492524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06132576423049151,0.12725222831879213,0.0,0.15333287854916147,0.0,0.07290958583123464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945758722497655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210565019213776,0.0,0.10168623341628784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19313481479240646,0.06696337200313812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330916182861023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132065848269836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18057673731022594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684665367769574,0.0,0.11124227662328016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14829300524413175,0.0,0.13809052029194482,0.0,0.0,0.27674726388791776,0.07904054228270466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076641617277276,0.0,0.09497044299048564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978516567644352,0.0,0.07993509891751842,0.0,0.1008083784461718,0.17304434488410034,0.22253109577506613,0.0,0.13785577857797593,0.15188184510095992,0.0,0.0,0.08296324828739443,0.09646372328523163,0.05894722512680323,0.0,0.08481360956350817,0.1807719391264118,0.0,0.07498733202663338,0.0,0.0,0.1536316444700816,0.13783236322576276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061676680434758824,0.0,0.0,0.055911267206094684
mentalhealth,Beautiful-Lawyer,2020/03/01,"23F never been intimate Don’t know how to write this cause I’ve never told anybody this cause I’m so ashamed but the stress, anxiety and depression is really getting to me so hope someone can give me advice.

So I’m a 23y old girl and I’ve never had sex or even kissed a guy. I’ve always been a really shy and really insecure person so when everyone else started experimenting I was and still am unfortunately too shy to kiss a guy because I don’t know how to kiss or how to have sex (sounds stupid ik). I’m just so embarrassed because I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to explain it but when someone gets close to me physically ór emotionally I freak out.
I’ve struggled with this a lot and thought I might be gay or a-sexual but the thing is I do want to but am too scared, shy, embarrassed, unexperienced whatever.
The thing is I’m not really an ugly girl so I get stopped on the street or guys asking for my number quite regularly. So that’s even more embarrassing cause people see I get attention but I don’t do anything with it.

There is this guy I’m in love with and I’ve pushed him away because of that reason. He was into me but I pretended I wasn’t. I’m so lost right now cause all I want is to be with this guy but I can’t because I have some mental blockade and I don’t know how to get over it.

It’s even so bad that I ‘escaped’ my life and have been traveling for a year thought things would change. It’s been over a year now and i have to come back but I’m just too afraid to come back because people are going to ask about boyfriends and because I have to leave this guy on the other side of the world.

Even writing this is so hard for me because I always just close my eyes for problems but I can’t anymore right now. 

Thanks if you read all this I appreciate it!",1.6413658233742048,3.3888073139841737,3.5462711469812227,89.49171154741579,78.76253298153034,6.991805059754772,22.756557504268198,7.928766900206844,0.9761760980909521,1408,44,318,24,34,475,161,379,0.191,0.716,0.09300000000000001,-0.9911,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,2,36,21,1,9,14,0,38,9,1,10,5,73,73,41,0,6,18,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,9,22,20,0,1,10,3,0,5,13,15,0,0,12,4,32,6,34,57,5,36,0,2,2,7,20,15,0,9,16,207,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570172780283567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12892068748857344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05926350844709361,0.0,0.0768283478277003,0.0,0.0,0.06375031681839834,0.0,0.14484595723623392,0.0,0.07278459639431181,0.1191376285614832,0.06468330870708904,0.3305703236708689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31832766475907043,0.08195184076900036,0.1334652225691536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672386355170963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471533844955431,0.08714210309966201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466995269761806,0.0,0.0,0.0740248687817436,0.0,0.07577946464635857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20237155513437824,0.07431524295636485,0.04402737004808178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.460238436963249,0.0,0.0,0.06939693199606138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694411306853216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21287445032993788,0.0,0.0,0.0820283960679289,0.0,0.0,0.05471858616693094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456647274234416,0.06586130178942746,0.06991872098210235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780704461136365,0.08218227721643014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17924641071949987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129059532314972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741438376118392,0.06764286904914242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412728989221322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239772765415522,0.07748987986047505,0.0,0.1985142843369581,0.07965094774017922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323160614013131,0.0,0.0,0.07755989914896577,0.0,0.061732695856010676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312783217049735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05483289724274057,0.0,0.06186677612608691,0.06476748232994904,0.08874038116177273,0.0809873309649512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132296927342058,0.0,0.0,0.15440071583376785,0.0,0.0,0.12300333136293427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740248687817436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091386347227111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05503169500139087,0.0,0.0,0.09977488354879233
mentalhealth,birbbirbbirbbirbbirb,2020/03/01,"Is it cruel to resuscitate someone after suicide? Disclaimer: this whole ordeal triggered my anxiety and I feel extremely weird right now, so my grammar might be off.

I work in a level one trauma center. Today we had a transfer from a smaller sister hospital. 34 y/o male found hanging from a noose in his basement. I don’t know who found him, but he was brought via EMS while sedated/intubated. He had abrasions all around his neck and just looked horrible. After his CT scans/xrays, he woke up and started screaming, but not because of physical pain. Just this horrible scream that I’ve heard from too many people who attempted suicide but weren’t successful. I’ve heard numerous stories from people who attempted suicide and were so grateful that they had a second chance at life, but then there are people who will keep trying until they succeed. I felt like I was being cruel by doing my job to keep him alive because he was clearly suffering, and who am I to force him to live if he doesn’t want to?

I’ve helped resuscitate multiple suicide attempts. The looks on their faces when they realize what is going on is terrifying. I don’t want to inflict pain on someone who is already suffering, but at the same time I want them to have a chance to get better. Still, the screams are so much different than the screams of people who are in physical pain and it honestly haunts me. 

Do you think it’s cruel/out of line for healthcare workers to “bring someone back” after a suicide attempt?",6.3385804665875805,7.225286750889679,6.539614472123373,75.98189304072756,65.83274021352312,9.376117042309213,35.18406484776591,9.444778638647367,3.3915122973507312,1191,55,206,22,18,382,165,281,0.261,0.619,0.12,-0.9953,3,0,0,0,0,5,29.0,1,1,5,9,12,18,2,0,11,0,26,6,2,1,2,34,47,19,5,4,9,1,2,1,0,2,4,6,0,1,15,8,0,2,7,0,0,4,5,13,0,2,15,10,25,5,34,28,4,31,0,2,2,0,30,14,0,2,14,143,40,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720048607083937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124696938692913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454547306471492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166552668078549,0.0,0.12948385787612654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393019484451408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096221462789094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053700726674076535,0.0,0.10197400124547114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328978485786665,0.0,0.0,0.05548802619226105,0.0,0.06035907222193707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118735400758536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539263918408977,0.1888007786904001,0.0,0.0,0.058367803062675486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501613407126438,0.051886676234756936,0.0,0.0937814629716242,0.0,0.17837185836737898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767577707688317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266732490386128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807331319158327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196764199840043,0.0,0.3390306395588696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29451827533807645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906989754046424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699629012241131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517284818961904,0.0,0.08481590438526745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5808582716886379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805224005422042,0.0,0.0,0.06192932121352274,0.0,0.10067046087215707,0.0,0.0,0.07210660965628267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18792838839872528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857472467614485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731891894327739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TransCrabby,2020/03/01,"Poll to accurately describe mental illness in a novel I’m made this google forum because I have this idea for a novel about mental illness. I really need it to show how different people act even if they have the same mental disorder. It basically follows a group of friends with mental illness and how they cope with it. Since I only experience my own mental illness I should probably know how other people experience theirs. The goal is to help people suffering with mental illness to live with their illnesses the best way that they can. I’m not sure if this is or isn’t a terrible idea. 


https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLScdAlxbgk6dLT1ZOxw4z9PX6mbNWn6ZFtAP51m09dyAxTHKRA/viewform?usp=sf_link",11.255446428571425,13.166710080357142,9.403571428571428,56.14142857142858,55.339285714285715,10.685714285714287,33.85714285714286,10.608840637214634,3.912164285714287,587,20,78,12,7,178,69,112,0.215,0.6709999999999999,0.114,-0.8993,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,5,2,5,5,0,0,7,0,7,6,0,4,1,20,13,7,0,4,4,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,3,3,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,0,10,3,12,11,3,4,0,1,0,0,8,1,0,3,0,56,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738501479371039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322184263521591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13263139917775635,0.14549094762961665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384653981501852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483548099126771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807805248583114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508913054277753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28661283624609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976612185593979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209551551016916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011923719757216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7675893816946542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412874278047544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654804294532697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640248151533169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368691023407383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132476519452668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501092288087699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964496577011625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076371066641827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AmberDragon78,2020/03/01,I don’t know what to do anymore.. I’ve been struggling with my mental health lately and it just feels like it’s not progressing anywhere good. My school was supposed to be sorting me out someone to talk to but they’ve done nothing and it’s not helping. I’m anxious in a lot of my lessons and much more before i go to school in the mornings. Suicide has crossed my mind a few times recently but I know I can’t act on those thoughts. I just want all of the pain to go away but I don’t know how anymore.,0.8210195412064571,2.8635050186915905,2.098963466440104,97.33938827527616,82.92523364485982,4.63857264231096,25.61512319456245,5.565023196281405,0.4232691588785049,395,17,90,2,11,126,69,107,0.159,0.7909999999999999,0.051,-0.9235,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,2,3,4,0,1,4,0,9,2,0,1,1,24,18,7,1,1,7,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,6,0,0,4,5,2,0,0,4,1,11,2,14,13,5,12,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,4,59,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200242618624206,0.3515697452268939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653268444726654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15082712488291733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18138880696991405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962318125504802,0.12662779639358196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20147109378855446,0.14866931424173485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840899851311266,0.0,0.0,0.11880727741378942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.292236726614188,0.0,0.19994629045266876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659564361452995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069204105722128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17862681956584456,0.0,0.17897248190099174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029951609070525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17007664029574013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18860703471552506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17501349031093302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3587739486072145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15018377793030974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18530071333701287,0.0,0.19388328386317852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424672420201339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071710212455715,0.10335619504383707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454694042069436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Organization3,2020/03/01,"please help this suicidal person and talk to them on reddit I've tride talking him out of suicide and it's no use. Please talk to him about it on reddit if you can.

His account is u/depressed-alt-acc",-0.21142857142857352,2.091881190476194,1.4685714285714295,97.00142857142859,94.23809523809523,3.752380952380953,18.904761904761905,5.46131890053228,-0.3469809523809526,158,5,34,1,6,51,34,42,0.226,0.626,0.147,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,5,3,3,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,7,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,1,0,21,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607904636735976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094591169792278,0.0,0.5266453684843818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5247924839207186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5784336044398881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20718439862803967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Good1dumguy,2020/03/01,"I recently discovered I may be suffering from bipolar disorder. 
Male, 29
I'm mostly here to ask advise on how to seek out a diagnosis and for any advice on how to cope with the crazy ass symptoms you can experience.

 I recently went through allot of crazy stress and feel like the symptoms I experience have become worse. 

From massive loss of sleep to suicidal thoughts and feeling of helplessness.  Through to exercising like crazy and being super focussed and feeling great! it's a weird ass rollercoaster and things seem to be getting worse over time. I've had some close and amazing friends reach out to me and basically told me I might need help. How have you coped with it? Or how have you helped someone else suffering?

Thanks in advance!",5.531229946524063,7.746626294117651,5.4568181818181785,77.96090909090908,69.14705882352942,9.063101604278074,33.68716577540107,9.573946990214177,3.4491852941176475,600,29,104,14,11,187,88,136,0.256,0.574,0.17,-0.9437,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,0,3,5,13,0,1,4,0,10,7,3,4,0,29,22,13,1,1,1,0,3,2,1,2,4,0,0,1,3,13,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,6,0,0,4,3,10,7,23,13,3,12,0,4,0,2,10,7,2,7,5,67,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542429646193855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10733907844210146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475624830878204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743258838925442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809024704503678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185809556162145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30880270830189505,0.0,0.0,0.2394314400917323,0.11276351803029495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219495939830964,0.0,0.0824667798860799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17402315502116325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21159851075887665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422884545382434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744714347932674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703904872985328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117030767696753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436949090168369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15795761888718554,0.0,0.13374039217949027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180809340408917,0.0,0.0,0.17265530790510095,0.0,0.0,0.3281199295427159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532120396038892,0.0,0.0,0.1048642914799432,0.0,0.0,0.12531020782572508,0.09203988772846654,0.0,0.0,0.15082634898630984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632262276985594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217122799248425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,downsights,2020/03/01,"Humans aren't designed to be happy. So stop trying. This article is so true. So sick of society trying to sell us shit with the promise it will bring the happiness we are ""meant"" to be feeling.

https://bit.ly/32wNsWS

""A huge happiness and positive thinking industry, estimated to be worth US$11 billion a year, has helped to create the fantasy that happiness is a realistic goal. Chasing the happiness dream is a very American concept, exported to the rest of the world through popular culture. Indeed, “the pursuit of happiness” is one of the US’s “unalienable rights”. Unfortunately, this has helped to create an expectation that real life stubbornly refuses to deliver.
Because even when all our material and biological needs are satisfied, a state of sustained happiness will still remain a theoretical and elusive goal, as Abd-al-Rahman III, Caliph of Córdoba in the tenth century, discovered. He was one of the most powerful men of his time, who enjoyed military and cultural achievements, as well as the earthly pleasures of his two harems. Towards the end of his life, however, he decided to count the exact number of days during which he had felt happy. They amounted to precisely 14.
Happiness, as the Brazilian poet Vinicius de Moraes put it, is “like a feather flying in the air. It flies light, but not for very long.” Happiness is a human construct, an abstract idea with no equivalent in actual human experience. Positive and negative affects do reside in the brain, but sustained happiness has no biological basis. And – perhaps surprisingly – I reckon this is something to be happy about.

Nature and evolution

Humans are not designed to be happy, or even content. Instead, we are designed primarily to survive and reproduce, like every other creature in the natural world. A state of contentment is discouraged by nature because it would lower our guard against possible threats to our survival.
The fact that evolution has prioritised the development of a big frontal lobe in our brain (which gives us excellent executive and analytical abilities) over a natural ability to be happy, tells us a lot about nature’s priorities. Different geographical locations and circuits in the brain are each associated with certain neurological and intellectual functions, but happiness, being a mere construct with no neurological basis, cannot be found in the brain tissue.
In fact, experts in this field argue that nature’s failure to weed out depression in the evolutionary process (despite the obvious disadvantages in terms of survival and reproduction) is due precisely to the fact that depression as an adaptation plays a useful role in times of adversity, by helping the depressed individual disengage from risky and hopeless situations in which he or she cannot win. Depressive ruminations can also have a problem solving function during difficult times.
Where is happiness located? Gutenberg Encyclopedia, CC BY-SA

Morality

The current global happiness industry has some of its roots in Christian morality codes, many of which will tell us that there is a moral reason for any unhappiness we may experience. This, they will often say, is due to our own moral shortcomings, selfishness and materialism. They preach a state of virtuous psychological balance through renunciation, detachment and holding back desire.
In fact, these strategies merely try to find a remedy for our innate inability to enjoy life consistently, so we should take comfort in the knowledge that unhappiness is not really our fault. It is the fault of our natural design. It is in our blueprint.
Advocates of a morally correct path to happiness also disapprove of taking shortcuts to pleasure with the help of psychotropic drugs. George Bernard Shaw said: “We have no more right to consume happiness without producing it than to consume wealth without producing it.” Well-being apparently needs to be earned, which proves that it is not a natural state.
The inhabitants of Aldous Huxley’s Brave New World live perfectly happy lives with the help of “soma”, the drug that keeps them docile but content. In his novel, Huxley implies that a free human being must inevitably be tormented by difficult emotions. Given the choice between emotional torment and content placidity, I suspect many would prefer the latter.
But “soma” doesn’t exist, so the problem isn’t that accessing reliable and consistent satisfaction by chemical means is illicit; rather that it’s impossible. Chemicals alter the mind (which can be a good thing sometimes), but since happiness is not related to a particular functional brain pattern, we cannot replicate it chemically.

Happy and unhappy

Our emotions are mixed and impure, messy, tangled and at times contradictory, like everything else in our lives. Research has shown that positive and negative emotions and affects can coexist in the brain relatively independently of each other. This model shows that the right hemisphere processes negative emotions preferentially, whereas positive emotions are dealt with by the left-sided brain.
It’s worth remembering, then, that we are not designed to be consistently happy. Instead, we are designed to survive and reproduce. These are difficult tasks, so we are meant to struggle and strive, seek gratification and safety, fight off threats and avoid pain. The model of competing emotions offered by coexisting pleasure and pain fits our reality much better than the unachievable bliss that the happiness industry is trying to sell us. In fact, pretending that any degree of pain is abnormal or pathological will only foster feelings of inadequacy and frustration.
Postulating that there is no such thing as happiness may appear to be a purely negative message, but the silver lining, the consolation, is the knowledge that dissatisfaction is not a personal failure. If you are unhappy at times, this is not a shortcoming that demands urgent repair, as the happiness gurus would have it. Far from it. This fluctuation is, in fact, what makes you human.""",10.673271889400922,11.548856096774195,10.398410138248847,52.06225806451614,56.58064516129032,14.101843317972353,45.839285714285715,13.199009011505511,7.042090668202766,4896,279,633,174,56,1604,471,992,0.14400000000000002,0.625,0.231,0.9987,7,1,3,0,1,1,134.0,27,2,4,16,23,77,7,2,75,0,84,20,8,9,18,140,104,56,0,14,22,0,3,3,0,12,12,2,0,8,57,47,0,8,19,6,6,3,25,27,1,5,8,6,40,51,123,70,12,67,7,6,0,0,69,41,1,11,22,472,97,10,0.0,0.0,0.02915163721862175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04777868817797048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040629187246431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022970413032642144,0.0,0.03642048018744197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026420148862184373,0.03261346535228134,0.0,0.0,0.23343621998803485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01926554655710762,0.0,0.10291792599349664,0.0,0.0,0.031210818133608414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928615054304481,0.0,0.02495497135006904,0.23522091004010856,0.0264585190559591,0.0,0.0,0.03946153205835717,0.0,0.02516920323535661,0.0,0.02684783265378959,0.05844284877371205,0.0,0.0,0.030209267532876626,0.0,0.028682664796316808,0.0,0.027303285694358918,0.0,0.0,0.03275408849793425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028656803831677662,0.0,0.025055967803000227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8268065834714159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001158622687169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03372286337281829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02655240248651537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03245698884375013,0.0,0.0633003295428852,0.04378316405141492,0.0,0.0791349432307215,0.026436572860078788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02539686786177554,0.0,0.0,0.019940390005575997,0.06057285548979743,0.0,0.03254034121621461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030163109092188417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02196001573402511,0.04430074764014598,0.0,0.0288514290468945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04048529480867314,0.02271968348523449,0.09536060242198093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026083860481910928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033677201685208435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05716865398024301,0.0,0.030030511367096738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034001895586875934,0.01913734207721804,0.03071431234824528,0.0,0.0,0.033840167724928136,0.07653386972543487,0.028415964861549244,0.023756125860291147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0306640983954956,0.02471116821805418,0.0335783866597935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02299761475086184,0.029545057930834662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023856533284626072,0.0249750786240555,0.0,0.031229636935675095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04492140003548703,0.0,0.05222045550231885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03969244934687105,0.01914134550251726,0.0,0.0,0.08709562926510117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112694173454807,0.0,0.02918147863005516,0.0,0.2515339096267977,0.025800590710875284,0.0,0.04929653538350636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05371864207800792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05759281133526261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366254453768852,0.0,0.0,0.01923716556282442
mentalhealth,Ridocule7,2020/03/01,"Night Terrors So for past 6 days Ive been having these crazy, realistic nightmares. They have all included somebody I've cared about being taken hostage/killed and there being nothing I can do about it. This has greatly affected my sleep and thoughts throughout the day. The most recent dream I've had was an old friend of mine killing her own sister and being sentenced to life. I haven't been able to stop worrying about not only her but everyone else. I've felt paranoid that I will lose someone in the near future in a similar way and I don't know how to stop it.",4.856689189189186,6.221842990990992,4.9167454954954986,84.52484797297298,69.54054054054055,7.712162162162162,30.091216216216218,8.07648339933343,2.0311162162162164,456,18,87,6,8,142,83,111,0.191,0.759,0.05,-0.9137,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,6,6,1,1,5,0,16,2,1,2,1,15,21,7,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,3,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,7,1,10,3,11,10,3,13,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,9,58,15,0,0.2062890124295381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21032539661388816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26607869430570485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17232799945696214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19711799169783767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19806980236946806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15937837928104054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274343644677549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22822822799332024,0.0,0.1133710463075274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570803016986392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23078463822284706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935882637641756,0.0,0.19793987107157368,0.0,0.21646561699779468,0.0,0.0,0.15689208969158006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19692620445229347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203685512882276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20643799188721748,0.0,0.1747880107983997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449337028032226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637704331627602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374261610340898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20949650562915187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-brokenn,2020/03/01,"anyone’s comments are help, you guys are the best help if anyone could help i feel it’s you
i don’t really like talking about this in person at all, in fact it’s so much easier just talking right behind a screen for me as sad as it sounds but in reality it’s crazy because no one would ever think that with the outgoing personality that i’m lucky to have somehow.

I have adhd I’ve been through almost all of the pills, Concerta, Adderall, Intuniv, Strattera, Focalin, and currently I’m trying Vyvanse (Lowest Dose) again since the first time in 6th grade (I’m 18 now) hoping to see maybe a difference in the pill to help me focus, relax and sit still. But with all this stimulants I notice the same thing, yeah my focus goes up but it’s a constant anxious feeling within me. With non-stimulants I find myself to be really tired or burnt out and just more emotionally sad and I feel it makes my mild depression a little worse. I have to constantly be alone or leave groups of people just so I can have the time to bring me self back down again. My hands have been sweaty for as long as I can remember due to this nervousness. And i’m just looking for someone with advice, little tricks and tips to calm down. Just ways to cope with this nervousness and help me with my ADHD. (rp)

Any help really is appreciated 🤍",4.2158744939271235,5.511222992307697,5.222995951417005,81.98937246963565,71.0,8.550607287449392,25.607287449392715,8.99025400887824,1.869615384615385,1038,31,205,20,19,341,148,260,0.134,0.698,0.168,0.8357,2,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,2,0,2,15,12,1,2,11,1,17,5,1,2,5,45,30,19,0,4,11,0,4,1,0,1,4,1,0,4,13,14,0,0,6,1,0,1,2,6,0,2,2,8,21,6,38,24,7,31,0,3,3,0,16,14,0,7,15,137,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718761041351398,0.11053125679786227,0.0,0.0,0.11326483662919702,0.11714940994267355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691970439628514,0.0,0.0,0.12778380845722134,0.0,0.15818039314025867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697576791849893,0.0,0.06895172559069304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870354952515297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24446671372459194,0.0,0.09031033540259274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974227763465034,0.0,0.0,0.11817745160601326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272352224337703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231583500462134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17157773163635834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338186938956767,0.0962125911686733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199817657337996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4548975583122671,0.0,0.0,0.11234524980476207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976875526692245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05526056946765909,0.2267348935326029,0.0,0.100100125425312,0.09498517910252273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550281010901977,0.0,0.11363571329763003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314997337030723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877820188651548,0.0,0.0,0.07664728536633844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841727778138516,0.19752921224962752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173863857893701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813328912213645,0.09659661004911974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013522751100866,0.0,0.11799997185009285,0.0,0.0,0.09356700851979627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583901391363793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033099663271116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18182949155189196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514626005210183,0.0724772872698863,0.0,0.0,0.13191246020543554,0.13000503940462452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076795289294696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978265037348758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527029033429695,0.08035117016170028,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Twizzledly,2020/03/01,"I know this sounds dumb, but im really bettering myself but i still feel like shit So, i deal with bullimia, and have for almost a year now. Ive also been a pretty big dude my entire life. Ever since the new year started, ive been working on myself. Ive lost like 30 pounds in a healty way instead of starving myself like i used to, and ive been seeing a therapist bi-weekly. But with all of this good stuff, ive still felt the exact same i felt before, and idk what to do anymore. Any advice i guess",2.4798113207547168,3.544137500000001,4.3831603773584895,87.23719339622644,74.94339622641509,6.809433962264151,20.797169811320764,7.1686216300943375,0.4889849056603772,389,8,83,4,8,133,70,106,0.136,0.7,0.165,0.65,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,7,8,2,0,6,0,10,2,1,1,3,19,19,8,0,0,3,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,6,5,15,5,9,13,2,12,0,1,1,0,1,3,2,2,11,54,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813477748515046,0.0,0.0,0.17229296630878693,0.0,0.0,0.13759610446881038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700651704833487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063701901501724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641015801867113,0.0,0.0,0.15217284950903234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738602722330574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15563787701400758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699856965299584,0.12291950598363653,0.3304086480614228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431553878360226,0.0,0.0,0.1895431915398864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858540347425309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455952823617617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215308761966506,0.25217908002636386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18782352120509285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661763600718263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17504660270083347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102258693208059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710932871098916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766168409878564,0.14232958724243314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178476296850073,0.0,0.2748142463742709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19696722670940875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19977460883292794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860436358516246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657300549997314,0.1380159374760375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526153316335426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22160165072817006
mentalhealth,PrefrontalOxymoron,2020/03/01,"Adolescence, anxiety, and alcohol Hi reddit. I [16M] would like to start by saying that I’m not in danger of becoming an alcoholic, not immediately. I’ve come close before and I’m doing better now. 

I’ve never been diagnosed (I know how that sounds, but I’ve done my research) and I exhibit a lot of symptoms of social anxiety disorder, which are obviously mitigated when I drink (it took me a few to even be able to write this, where I’m anonymous). I’ve noticed that that confidence leads to success with friends, girls, family and the like, makes me more motivated to create and consume art, allows me to order from chipotle, and overall makes me a legitimately happier and more proactive person. I feel more in control of my life despite having less control of my motor function.

But, obviously, I don’t want to rely on alcohol to escape in this way. I have trouble internalizing my drunk self’s knowledge that people really don’t care and that their judgement is irrelevant. I’ve tried therapy once before and maybe all this is just me trying to avoid finding another therapist, but I really didn’t like it. I don’t know how appropriate this is for the sub but I guess I’m just wondering if anybody’s been in a similar situation and has some advice. 

TL;DR  I feel deeply relieved from my anxiety when I drink but don’t want to become reliant on it so I’m looking for advice.",5.1602093301435445,6.5914597537878805,6.9478867623604526,69.99775119617225,68.88636363636364,10.254864433811806,32.8341307814992,10.426177893888326,3.8357757575757567,1101,50,189,31,19,383,149,264,0.066,0.731,0.203,0.9904,0,1,5,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,6,10,11,1,1,7,0,18,9,0,9,4,51,38,21,0,4,10,0,2,3,1,1,6,2,0,3,14,13,6,3,8,4,0,3,8,3,0,0,5,5,23,8,27,31,8,18,0,0,1,0,9,8,0,5,8,126,37,4,0.11316646426865225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22116991828777768,0.0,0.36282160255124607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866490495147132,0.25971610624585506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499669374943594,0.19259265197736994,0.0,0.0,0.10008654127045033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538075247136895,0.0,0.0,0.09748288852389324,0.0,0.0,0.2538516248341325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486157909732328,0.0,0.0,0.1296985723345479,0.0,0.0,0.11580858350401277,0.0,0.221720104120742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474538235110116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668327095508558,0.0,0.11444072921205145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343209815818637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874321295724086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466561889191463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243866584066641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993282044290084,0.16586225454827094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950313282833367,0.0,0.0,0.0962100810501494,0.0,0.0,0.15107898730264382,0.0,0.11369092396448822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728095373521143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288407696321355,0.0,0.1205185910922663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845537733718393,0.09881259156537556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14499466960685756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999451455571625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805730292098628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720384732694875,0.0,0.11535895893299793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009980587394708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762328704040145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941571444635985,0.13139498732037674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573210573670004,0.15366520159320815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334970253352758,0.08982627187112742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272420314118546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039020931197027,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,honda331,2020/03/01,"I can’t feel the things I’m touching. I had a super bad dream last night that must have messed with my psyche, because when I woke up after a night of nausea, on and off sleep, and an overall unwell mental feeling. My level of dissociation skyrocketed and I felt like I was still sleeping. My head vibrated and mumbled, my hands shook, I felt drunk almost. I haven’t felt like that since highschool when my mental health was at its worst. I felt like this almost every day.

A new thing was this “loss” of feeling. I couldn’t feel my toast in my hands, or chewing it. Technically I could, but it was a faded feeling. It made me drop my toast a few times, or struggle to get it in my mouth. 

Should I see a doctor? Should I be concerned.? feel a bit better now that I’m home from work and I’ve taken my meds. I don’t know what to think.",1.6795394736842084,3.6091808830409375,3.0693530701754383,92.09245065789473,79.35087719298245,5.2106725146198825,20.04422514619883,5.985473137389443,-0.09904415204678374,645,16,140,4,16,210,101,171,0.10400000000000001,0.787,0.109,-0.2198,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,4,4,11,0,2,9,0,15,10,6,1,1,29,34,10,0,5,3,0,13,3,0,3,2,0,1,0,13,6,2,0,12,2,0,1,4,6,0,0,12,14,24,5,14,16,3,21,0,1,1,0,0,7,0,4,15,89,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561178555634639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677911121659288,0.07795785797803571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310439632626895,0.13961792304876858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021062234621492,0.0,0.0,0.08247561452449471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308963023841204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774911045345337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38797672779073106,0.0,0.4911608187733607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681493332576033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124749232811148,0.135936383321454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282796563253092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028256612500818,0.10424381021139127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18743529285625135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100842080137987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205204125970838,0.0,0.2577571560554196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351268278317284,0.0,0.24002389308685096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190824384632377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578826706840967,0.0,0.2559558597734124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212958335966336,0.0,0.0,0.13369376726539936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699229836102325,0.0819439110365316,0.0,0.0,0.07457110572745908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310221985757823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lomorling,2020/03/01,"Looking for Advice I'm starting a nonprofit for mental health & as most people on here probably know..people just simply don't care about mental health. My view of it is people only care after tragedy occurs (a suicide, a violent act, a death etc something along those lines.) with my project I would like to introduce the methods and outlets that I've found to people Before things get to those dark points. I struggle with mental health day to day, I've been in behavioral hospitals, I've gone to therapy and on my own I've found outlets that I never learned about in those places and that's why I'm starting a nonprofit. It's in the early stages and I'm trying to find partners to help with launching it etc, but again no one cares about this topic. So if anyone has any ideas on how I could launch this and maybe get some help with that side of things I would love to hear them!

​

Thank you!",6.627528089887639,6.45278770786517,6.201438202247193,82.3050786516854,65.17977528089888,8.917752808988762,30.721348314606747,8.238735603445708,2.074811685393258,724,23,140,8,10,224,106,178,0.10099999999999999,0.7859999999999999,0.113,0.7473,0,1,2,0,0,1,22.0,0,1,1,0,8,8,1,1,7,0,7,4,0,3,1,27,24,10,2,4,3,0,0,1,1,2,3,1,0,1,14,10,0,0,5,0,0,2,3,2,0,1,4,3,10,6,28,17,5,20,0,0,2,1,7,9,0,3,9,86,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602923157992383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235128916819918,0.13184470708210158,0.07378670420266803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586879051933595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232924194749638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33188236316300274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663192425264539,0.0,0.0,0.1399527070516924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420221475700809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917104435642236,0.0,0.0,0.2379389205859525,0.0,0.0,0.1133781281210258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3460052697213396,0.12229233045297574,0.0,0.1454564073932497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248824616966518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05963117367748241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053009762912948385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111635788363448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792944591821737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900724111930364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3280407059700157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368527264242122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352538101455101,0.08252247600894358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008931209731982,0.0,0.11336399084626675,0.0,0.10257171780580164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698608143383288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835319784615096,0.0,0.0,0.15359992773456688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343234453363545,0.0,0.11868618883556012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989626188923033,0.12408422323744807,0.0,0.1441709872891553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736673566262394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790833284624634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541568073250671,0.0,0.13184470708210158,0.0
mentalhealth,Emotional_Fix,2020/03/01,"Hi, I (17F) need a little help? So for the past couple of months, I have not been in the best state of mind. 2019 was the worst year for me. And with everything that has been going on I have started to feel extremely worthless.

​

Recently I have been experiencing what I can best describe as panic attacks, very frequently too. I know that my anxiety is through the roof, and mixed with my already very short span of attention, is hindering me from performing well in school. I can barely sit for 15 minutes with my books when I get distracted with what is going on in my mind. I can't talk this out with my friends because I can't tell them some of the stuff, and I've started feeling very lonely.

​

I would really appreciate it if anyone can suggest any tips to curb my anxiety. I tried looking it up but most of them, like deep breathing, don't work for me. Also, I did ask my mother to join therapy, but she says anything I have to work out I can discuss with her and that i'm 'too smart' to need someone else to tell me what to do. My parents are of the mindset that mental illness is 'all in your head' and that I need to snap out of it.

I just want to know how I can stop this and not let what others say or think about me affect me to this extent.",6.602844364937386,5.3161632558139535,6.922868217054262,80.77720035778178,65.66666666666667,10.109004174120454,33.41204531902206,9.057496981413335,2.591145140131187,992,35,210,14,13,323,144,258,0.08199999999999999,0.821,0.09699999999999999,0.5862,1,2,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,2,5,9,12,1,2,7,0,26,3,2,2,1,42,43,15,0,6,7,2,2,1,1,1,1,2,0,0,17,15,0,2,6,1,0,2,5,6,1,0,5,6,37,6,41,36,7,27,0,2,1,0,18,14,0,4,10,154,54,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12263429657222405,0.08887031514442857,0.0,0.24081778875052695,0.27006929855667183,0.07557195084977521,0.0,0.17002770676853246,0.0,0.0,0.07770441260543294,0.0,0.09145020653034974,0.0,0.10389119117692723,0.12642598335437338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774358349716565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332473552990399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296280829328506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928345357679105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987613473185616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238094758603896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08585846698517803,0.0,0.05806063855533925,0.0,0.12631504547200054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140510486810461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448784024907075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221478632218449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11363756338547767,0.0,0.05429231784648162,0.11138107175826857,0.0,0.0,0.09332089017933898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119925167014719,0.0,0.22441846881803013,0.0,0.08870260062946964,0.0,0.0,0.2472036102738061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13038666218620235,0.1233962891797064,0.0,0.1060857946965896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119247875094521,0.0,0.109727090726178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767494648618846,0.0,0.11246910606454462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415976446890972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15731623081311158,0.0,0.0,0.09290933647274427,0.0,0.0,0.1272168247667005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932177721202236,0.19426436825515275,0.0,0.12708640291042966,0.0,0.0,0.07120737182070361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544971569538846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27508071917390875,0.06554712780314872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991887246507723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16180737050190158,0.0,0.0,0.07894329196713867,0.0,0.27006929855667183,0.07156383028707823
mentalhealth,spydershadow,2020/03/01,"I feel emotionally numb. Maybe this isn’t the correct word, and please tell me what you think. Lately I’ve just felt uninterested in things I once liked. It feels like nothing matters because who cares, I have no real attachment to things anymore. Like when I see an attractive woman I’m like eh who cares, I feel nothing. When I think about sex I feel uninterested and I feel I lost that passion I once had. Just life in general I’ve lost that spark, I feel not happy but not sad. It’s hard to describe. Maybe it’s not called emotional numbness, maybe it’s something else entirely, but I wanted to put it out there to see if others have experienced something similar? How did you get back a feeling of emotion again. And then I think, this is the reason no one likes me. Why people talk to me, then ignore me. I just feel alone, lost, and numb. 😞",2.5441392215568857,4.778264473053895,3.672241766467064,87.32476983532935,77.92215568862275,6.5702095808383225,24.20995508982036,7.645422480735847,1.171706886227545,665,23,135,10,16,215,97,167,0.149,0.6659999999999999,0.185,0.5178,0,1,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,3,10,18,0,0,4,0,6,6,0,2,1,35,28,12,0,2,9,0,10,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,15,5,0,1,13,0,0,1,6,8,0,1,6,13,20,10,10,22,0,11,0,4,2,2,8,3,0,1,12,79,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652634351225937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200412269845907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908883651281255,0.0,0.06269920787165327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502604370922763,0.0,0.20973423375883776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592181805711803,0.34709273444410205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160509987668565,0.07347934488521142,0.09875654319337134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05373728193895223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949063143324628,0.09213751650755436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160244658212733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264924386731929,0.25124780434982785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3368338291407004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099938028521246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19738352028752745,0.0,0.0,0.21907357869505548,0.06969693704997933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130642718835584,0.0,0.0,0.11290346121450508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339727894894027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707104950070785,0.0,0.10575165646616236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16392359488779226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836498809410798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267062927245956,0.0898994515679469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666404834457135,0.19771521865095304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060666306377066624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928102760827961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,procrastinatinq,2020/03/01,I feel like committing suicide soon I’m an 18 year old girl and every time I get rejected from a guy I feel the pain intensify. I just want to kill my self. How do I stop taking rejection so personally and poorly? I have a huge fear that no one will ever love me,1.4119642857142836,3.0819291249999985,4.1601428571428585,85.18485714285717,79.17857142857143,8.051428571428572,21.91428571428571,8.841846274778883,1.42889,205,6,46,5,5,73,47,56,0.371,0.469,0.16,-0.9538,0,1,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,1,1,4,0,3,2,0,1,2,10,10,4,2,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,4,1,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,5,0,1,0,2,8,2,2,9,0,7,0,2,0,1,5,1,0,0,7,27,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22638974609541454,0.21086904667143855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816310456292088,0.25309499811068925,0.17879783689997736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13075932817009395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478134372499786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27689426105863657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227263052983245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258846352211199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626234606919897,0.0,0.16959407575772015,0.0,0.2663122220530406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185320982113893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610933455725791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092426594021338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737622603654314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881770493895268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459384481951458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761977491601042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16117009048562114
mentalhealth,JeminiGupiter,2020/03/01,"Physically sick because of 'deja vu' from dreams I have no other way to describe how I feel other than very physically ill and I have no idea what's going on. 

Starting around noon today, I've been getting weird 'deja vu' or flashbacks to dreams (I think) I've had. This then makes my heart feel like it has more pressure and is beating slightly faster, then it moves down to my stomach where I then feel nauseous and lose my appetite. It lasts maybe a minute and a half, and needless today, makes me extremely uncomfortable.

It had happened maybe 6 or 7 times since then and I'm wondering what the heck is happening or how common it is. I am 19F and have depression, anxiety and social anxiety. 

I apologize if this is the wrong subreddit, I'm just trying to figure out wtf is happening. Thank you!",4.918663101604277,6.283157111111112,5.56787878787879,79.91727272727275,69.39215686274511,8.700891265597148,30.248960190136657,9.095868883498916,2.586939869281046,630,25,117,12,11,204,95,153,0.22399999999999998,0.706,0.07,-0.9752,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,2,5,7,0,1,4,0,13,4,2,4,0,26,29,18,0,1,5,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,11,10,0,0,7,2,0,2,2,5,0,1,3,3,12,2,11,26,1,20,0,2,0,0,3,5,1,5,13,75,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24808677318508385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443468076955487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884440220490297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13965852205462256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459619127727568,0.11583913363712972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471605447145504,0.0,0.09215289858180747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4301629395037525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921471062582226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830462560388312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217291202138232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921771221445037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18140302882288487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21647116344318748,0.0,0.3258005235926419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723385109490339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413116124375393,0.0,0.0,0.16529027960583864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147697537472397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14928482775212368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389840242942246,0.0,0.0,0.09455026803668767,0.0,0.3073962017449309,0.0,0.0,0.1100883900650544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378973988474946,0.0,0.12870616838829407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17584345454601547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17728425598723874,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dovakin123489,2020/03/01,"I’m losing my mind I hate being alone but I can’t stand to go to sleep, I don’t know what to do. I can hear phantom music in my head as I try to find a new show since my last one just ended. I need someone to talk to, if you could find it in your heart to take up some of my attention so I don’t do something bad, I would love that.",0.1776371308016884,0.7080412151898763,2.6893037974683547,99.23285864978905,79.8860759493671,5.772995780590718,18.22995780590717,5.46131890053228,-0.7107485232067519,252,4,71,1,6,88,55,79,0.135,0.79,0.075,-0.3818,0,1,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,1,2,4,1,0,1,0,9,4,3,0,0,12,17,4,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,3,0,1,0,1,14,1,12,14,1,8,0,1,0,1,5,3,0,2,3,45,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21725643498193145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17514755805244325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16748271733669853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857922280617448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3834483911841469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11921601577792633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071025189746602,0.2152825353186059,0.0,0.2364238355594005,0.24857614685910026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528303326560815,0.17098895647831852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346767891095076,0.0,0.0,0.18932385320021872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21180593031887715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555403496215341,0.0,0.2025952878938848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214425815616213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735222969785538,0.0,0.2099195399631704,0.0,0.17773578633686388,0.1614896916804546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577194661310105,0.1686036111000139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241873504728791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14901320275108465,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wandering-Hermit,2020/03/01,"I hate being disabled Sensory Processing Disorder, Anxiety Disorder, PTSD... I just started having an anxiety attack for no reason on my way to a party, and so I had to just go home and chill. I'm still struggling with anxiety for no reason that I can tell, and that's very upsetting. I wish it would stop.",5.104322033898306,6.111316677966106,6.962500000000002,71.41629237288137,68.66101694915254,11.323728813559322,33.39406779661017,11.20814326018867,4.305267796610169,240,11,42,8,4,84,43,59,0.414,0.508,0.078,-0.9657,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,2,2,2,0,5,0,0,2,0,11,10,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,0,6,0,6,7,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4454274638209471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22080168068635397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4448804271036411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030396440743266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19162046921803216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19468482038137774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22687700730512106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3991069779982825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737559021159804,0.0,0.1549979175308886,0.16226520134815509,0.0,0.2029015964945232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16964036138037564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014188303828852,0.0,0.1540570164954324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231901671344188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787364814398173,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zlashtek,2020/03/01,"What’s wrong with me This past year I thought I got “brain fog” due to using roaccutane pills for acne. I completed the whole therapy and I thought the brain fog will go away but it didn’t. I started feeling this way when I started using the pills, like two months in. So i thought it’s gotta be connected to the roaccutane. But I started questioning it.

I started questioning if it even is a brain fog. As the time passes by I feel like I am just going nuts. The feeling I have all the time is just undescribeable. 

I feel like I am not as alive as I was before the therapy. I feel like my emotions are fogged (although I was always introvert, but I did feel everything back then, I just wasn’t showing it)
, like the connections between my friends,family, girlfriend is also fogged. 

Since I had depersonalization and derealization, this feeling kinda reminds me of that but I know it’s not, because I would feel like I’m watching my lif as a movie. 

I have so much to say but so little to worss to explain this chaos in my head.

Sometimes I wonder maybe everyone feels like this, maybe this is how it feels like to grow up and face the real world. (I’m 18, anout to finish high school, and have no idea what to do with life)

I could talk to my best friend and feel as if Im talking to a random guy I just met I feel no connection with him, or anyone.

I honestly don’t know what’s going on inside my head.",2.4158947368421053,4.256720203508774,3.802666666666667,88.10400000000001,76.78947368421052,7.0863157894736855,25.08421052631579,7.9765259561132025,1.3661326315789473,1098,39,232,18,25,361,140,285,0.079,0.764,0.157,0.9742,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,1,12,12,0,0,13,0,22,9,6,3,1,53,55,26,0,4,14,0,12,8,2,3,3,1,0,1,17,8,0,0,22,1,0,5,7,1,0,1,11,14,37,11,27,39,4,28,0,0,1,0,11,8,0,8,22,152,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06391372429461291,0.0665016414420429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05588343414409322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508950233215814,0.06145520948725367,0.0,0.04871980831091239,0.0,0.06800787354889974,0.0,0.0838733784999132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26765869482795274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379686656044054,0.0,0.0,0.0638113432494344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990167532814146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05278783441743299,0.0,0.0,0.07636905104084409,0.07182888604017351,0.0,0.07534350170066699,0.0,0.4849325596499856,0.3425784521820811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06174766431660185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13626481988004513,0.0,0.06392105419816482,0.0,0.0,0.07913550599469407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16404639207288424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444215247259243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902223930471572,0.08632964996671193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784626048022416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564513867925393,0.3123674516977841,0.08010300290290759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605851085438712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379310742438048,0.0,0.0587519852324862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629474727071232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17906222558365448,0.0,0.0,0.09096891785471016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06355731128017203,0.0,0.08088549506085023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611243852503798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904506209236592,0.0,0.2262772712556819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284768132746277,0.0,0.0,0.18279591568930112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903478083577468,0.09320651107674596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807233939630984,0.0,0.0,0.13805417471410195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343849234184214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923023999281235,0.0,0.0,0.08667217573384807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05677441099985955,0.08738233805426934,0.0,0.051467252152773896
mentalhealth,volvoraggare22,2020/03/01,"I have no emotions, i can't even be depressed even tho my life is failing. How can i stop this I have felt nothing for the last 2 months and now i'm really fucking tired of it, i can have short feelings but only the most basic emotions for a couple of minutes max. I'd rather go back to being suicidal than feelig nothing. What can i do?",1.9999061032863883,3.5619704225352122,3.8165492957746494,88.77627934272303,77.16901408450704,5.860093896713615,25.91784037558686,6.42735559955562,0.9422657276995308,264,10,55,2,6,89,54,71,0.19899999999999998,0.775,0.027000000000000003,-0.8997,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,7,3,1,0,3,0,11,3,0,1,0,8,16,4,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,2,7,0,6,13,1,7,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,1,5,41,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619169532233766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23914526841880546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18615364660195996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4862374389335072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855054849677993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928252310048553,0.0,0.2075200250900288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19980998424248408,0.0,0.0,0.12283244777024507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617592677342786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265999013956627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17251401079247342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41476778912989787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643776587836012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13845930063411413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18069551694356428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364126574270916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24841123471709545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KeithDavidMcCoy,2020/03/01,"trying to present mental health in a positive light with - HELLO LARRY BARRY 
Hi everyone,

I wanted to do something more. I'm a mental health nurse. I have seen friends and acquaintances suffer as their family members took their lives and I was also frustrated by how drama (TV and Film) always presents mental health as just Psycho Killers.

I wrote a novel, HELLO LARRY BARRY, it is funny, clever and inspiring. I want the general public to understand and view mental health positively, I want mental health people to be viewed in a balanced light. Magnificent Mental Health. 

I'm trying, going the extra mile, wish me luck.

Keith ☘️💚👍",3.7580334448160535,6.777020495652177,4.995652173913044,75.00224080267559,78.82608695652173,7.016722408026756,22.759197324414714,8.139509932561175,1.9585986622073568,507,16,75,10,13,167,77,115,0.086,0.6559999999999999,0.257,0.9590000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,0,3,7,1,0,6,0,5,6,0,1,0,17,16,9,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,2,4,0,2,0,2,0,0,4,5,9,5,10,11,2,7,0,1,3,0,8,3,0,1,2,41,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348409468233592,0.08686443157477229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975324014143476,0.0,0.0,0.09841366778570568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065478754544711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05932969405391585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6657976404606799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921820912948509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6312294844115837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237387241823914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036784267400912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598592331480218,0.1417537723059154,0.0,0.0,0.10867816187743023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847234123603634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200483083546826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LerasiumMistborn,2020/03/01,How can I commit suicide fast and painlessly? How can I commit suicide fast and painlessly?,4.353750000000002,7.6950968750000035,5.230000000000004,71.81500000000003,80.25,8.200000000000001,33.0,8.841846274778883,4.080100000000002,74,4,10,2,2,24,8,16,0.361,0.308,0.331,-0.5803,0,0,0,0,0,4,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,6,2,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,8,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pinky8519,2020/03/01,"My life is crumbling before my eyes What do you guys do when you feel like you're dying from the inside out? When it feels like you can't breathe no matter how hard you try. When you feel like life isn't worth living. What do you do to push through? Where do you find strength to continue? I really can't deal with life much longer. I'm only human and we all have our limits on how much adverse we can handle, and I've crossed my limit a long time ago.",1.987187500000001,3.4767883437500053,2.8566666666666656,95.955,77.02083333333334,5.633333333333334,19.291666666666668,5.985473137389443,-0.31287083333333365,355,7,82,2,8,112,64,96,0.067,0.8,0.133,0.8170000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,3,7,0,3,7,5,0,0,2,0,11,5,2,2,1,16,15,7,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,6,0,2,4,0,1,2,4,1,0,0,0,5,14,4,7,15,3,12,0,0,1,0,13,3,0,0,10,49,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17618200986740049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16912365292304166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20490499639844506,0.0,0.0,0.20627361142445835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014855546481544,0.4259662611278077,0.0,0.0,0.18165609217596249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19679612302702928,0.0,0.0,0.17804311074373588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4211540921093946,0.2913011486497528,0.0,0.17550200981646644,0.17588961892887592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922117643291441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116015572642802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732587628090125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589412230465372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13493983261444814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WorriedRefrigerator4,2020/03/01,Who else gets sad during the weekends? I work Monday through friday 8 to 10 hours a day. I honestly dread my job I don't like many people I work with (drama fest) and I really just look foward to the weekend but for some reason when the weekend is finally here I just get super depressed and I have panic attacks and extremely anxious,2.2670129870129863,4.758732454545457,3.820476190476192,84.46500000000003,80.51515151515152,6.195670995670996,24.58008658008658,7.447530270364453,1.4611541125541128,266,10,48,4,7,88,52,66,0.282,0.621,0.09699999999999999,-0.9177,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,4,8,1,2,4,0,3,0,0,1,0,9,6,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,8,3,5,6,1,8,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,9,30,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816463479507716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836231068041191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16078261890281706,0.0,0.21472805902794226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082643041771688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27310402069400536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605056057810239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455175249381677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24739908048253295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179898035717485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20935538803127324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25275852702134954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925084641138416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728383288150478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971267510596612,0.2563294824007013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3629974464736246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,3rd_degree_berns,2020/03/01,"feeling out of it hi guys im a long time lurker, first time poster. recently ive been feeling out of it mentally and to cope with it on a normal basis, i always workout in the morning at 5:30am because for some reason making myself suffer keeps it at bay. however, lately it isnt doing much to keep my mind from going to dark places and i know i cant go there because once i start going towards it, i just dive deeper into the dark place. i just got out of a 2 hour cycling session in my gym to hopefully help but the feeling is still there. does anyone have any advice that helped you that might be able to help me? 

Thank you guys!

​

ps i do take anti anxiety and anti depressants",3.1510058027079317,4.57635106382979,4.640296582849776,84.62454545454548,73.822695035461,6.829400386847197,24.8749194068343,7.348242739294969,1.1970652482269504,544,17,106,6,11,182,96,141,0.095,0.799,0.105,-0.2828,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,1,5,4,0,0,6,0,10,0,0,2,0,24,25,4,0,2,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,8,8,0,2,5,2,0,3,2,2,0,1,2,3,14,2,21,21,2,24,0,2,0,0,8,12,0,3,9,70,22,1,0.13998314320350866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678990743445188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647718896111688,0.15167167717666216,0.17009484091081492,0.095193337604904,0.0,0.10708672139997216,0.0,0.0,0.09787946849808944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706648496405959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056727612187294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250019194714586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21233904967960707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906959009848266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23866693858606505,0.0,0.11195730732334118,0.0,0.0,0.27721063977979377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814832505138793,0.0,0.0,0.13903484649231815,0.1378551985985535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15120581588776624,0.0,0.0,0.248846899032388,0.0,0.0,0.07693107462918768,0.0,0.15790708277010276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12388067672248047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343983507526316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410700839624782,0.14849999358623414,0.1413430699270741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290371692146943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371537591039435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907747895616688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925051815087769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143925985372785,0.13821646622123773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908078924872744,0.0,0.11179071898591963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052499025719177,0.0,0.0,0.12887767093337069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16325059303316755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17009484091081492,0.0
mentalhealth,bweebslayer,2020/03/01,"I need help but not sure if i am mentally ill or just lazy Im very sorry this post is going to get very long but i really hope anyone can stick through it and help me, so i have doubted my mental health for a very long time because when i first told my parents im having difficulties in school and cant pay attention they brushed it off but on my insistence we visited a psychologist and she told me that i need to see a therapist and need medication but i guess my parents didn't care that much because we never went back and i didn't receive therapy and i never bought it up because i was scared , this happened when i was 16 and progressively things got worse i was in grade 11 and i had to get to college but i lost all win to do anything with my life and i stopped caring all together about my grades and i let them slip i failed 11th grade and had to repeat it in another city and when i repeated it i failed again and i failed grade 12 as well. I dont know how to describe my utter lack of will to study i knew alot counted on me passing with good grades but no matter how much i forced myself i could not study or be serious about my studies 2 years after graduating HS i spent in my parents house because i didnt know what to do and now im in university studying biochemistry i thought this was something i am passionate about but i was wrong from the day the first semester started to now i can feel myself getting worse and worse i havent showered in 2 weeks i lay in bed and i feel numb i dont do my assignments and i often think of dying i use social media and fandoms to distract myself and when those distracts arent there i often think about dying my room is a mess and i barely eat unless a meal is made for me i cant even remember the last time i was genuinely happy my grades are very low and im at the risk of being removed from university all this happening and i still cant seem to care i forced myself to but iam so exhausted i cant pay attention in class even when i try very hard and im so so so so tired i dont want to do anything im so tired of life i think i might have ADD and depression can someone please help am i in need of medical help or am i just lazy?",1.2211538461538467,3.1398670128205133,3.241213675213676,90.34823076923077,80.7948717948718,6.63863247863248,23.00683760683761,7.715138304826218,1.0009740170940171,1734,59,386,29,45,586,211,468,0.24100000000000002,0.6629999999999999,0.096,-0.9975,5,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,2,0,2,8,31,26,0,5,10,0,44,13,0,4,6,85,81,52,2,9,17,3,3,0,0,2,10,0,3,0,14,29,2,1,13,0,4,6,17,16,1,2,21,5,74,10,47,54,7,50,0,6,1,1,17,16,0,12,27,265,88,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144397979943964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047640570313011235,0.0,0.1121362313481773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05239050308055921,0.0,0.16613434653910086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084001201243052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054399104697177916,0.0,0.0,0.04394051055218254,0.0,0.058683336594174976,0.0,0.1414237596560819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23955607957509,0.0,0.0,0.0697176428714098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000314943963139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890075165359638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159087450365326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679092116271556,0.0,0.03872187308046974,0.057147198724901836,0.054492633168488784,0.0,0.07505679932445904,0.0,0.1205005666577003,0.07252944304556277,0.0610342882164172,0.0,0.0,0.07242278969607319,0.0,0.0,0.1826739600423716,0.0,0.0,0.06767199987814909,0.0,0.07861698206511049,0.0,0.0,0.4415756285197626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748888469944822,0.055537946203880265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967118271847797,0.09624949872702926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205921155964582,0.0,0.0,0.07437583078016996,0.0,0.0,0.0644696231944633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13727479018660396,0.13732520940707854,0.07227894158482069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017201434973384,0.20208068983469912,0.10509760570042836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269627706040768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07479019028944843,0.0,0.0,0.06525311796242694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04364810409048541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718204321881808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821358095431218,0.06895480161103269,0.05429362715150033,0.06202623537824856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694535855825611,0.05772934546993835,0.05245254426807118,0.0,0.07626994380714258,0.0482252854383326,0.0,0.054411550143376,0.056962708146841026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421507528912078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791666535625652,0.07910831617573576,0.04526491070985752,0.13097170509175604,0.0,0.0540904371565798,0.07945845513238775,0.15661901194821326,0.0,0.1302090754289779,0.0,0.046258215784151534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058845521201447926,0.0,0.28108661838169585,0.04018693979167288,0.0,0.054652633199626884,0.0,0.06126025420770623,0.06316049401598724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20830175962970096,0.0,0.07449335360199498,0.0,0.04387577969312876
mentalhealth,lana_del_reymysterio,2020/03/01,"Have ADD, getting very frustrated and disheartened with medication. Every time I take a step forward, I take two steps back. So I have been diagnosed with ADHD-PI (ADD). I am getting really frustrated and disheartened with medication. Feels like every time I make progress, I take another two steps back soon afterwards.

Here's the summary. 

* After **Ritalin failed**, I got switched to Dexamphetamine.
* **Currently titrating on Dexamphetamine.** Been on it for five weeks across various doses in titration.
* The **previous dose** was **not starting to be as effective** as it was prior, so I figured now was the **time to move up.**
* **Bumped up yesterday** and it was great! **Best I've felt on Dex** \- perfect clarity of vision and mind, no tiredness, more motivated, and the happiest I had been in a while. Getting things done that I would never normally do. It's like a subtle compulsion, I see something (dirty room/sink) and WANT to do something about it (clean them.
* Finally felt like I had found what I needed.
* **Today, I kept everything the same.** Same sleep length and quality, same water intake, same meal before the dose, same dose.
* **I didn't get the same positives I had yesterday**. I instead became sleepier and more sluggish - more foggier, less alert, less motivated, and definitely less happy. Don't want to do things as much, avoiding doing things.

Why does this keep happening??? I'm at a loss. Feel like I'm just going around in circles and it's incredibly disheartening.

Any insight or words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated.",1.6715590852765594,3.235256494423794,3.019619803987837,80.67282725019717,117.88475836431226,6.983462881604147,24.893601441928574,7.348242739294969,2.7256859975216847,1203,56,195,36,66,388,159,269,0.092,0.711,0.19699999999999998,0.9819,1,1,2,0,0,0,96.0,0,0,1,8,11,18,2,1,11,0,24,11,1,4,2,49,49,17,0,6,3,0,4,4,0,2,8,0,1,0,12,16,2,3,10,0,0,6,5,8,0,3,17,5,18,10,27,28,15,36,0,5,1,0,1,12,0,1,24,134,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700131579459704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752134558750631,0.11953498680850135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148081342234512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17531212880933356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700239562381142,0.0,0.1196320105157278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570377398285632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975886919612884,0.11665772207144677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920934810077115,0.0,0.10245246112388262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527983831708473,0.1628778591685914,0.21890851584693688,0.12487729801862048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249909823916142,0.0,0.0,0.2382333008937077,0.0,0.06478668462854467,0.0,0.09117319899089524,0.25136249232660485,0.0,0.0,0.1008064898279793,0.12135110672750195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132508715229273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227711994832727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609336880878424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296784176939733,0.0,0.0,0.1151036957617012,0.0,0.0,0.12115995188470673,0.08380034572185435,0.08452676020237981,0.08792092032297669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169210183859188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07302890406328105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908402362740602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407855684673228,0.0,0.0,0.175519734616055,0.0,0.0,0.08068711842327284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571329341616238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22720208979595144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19941635557125756,0.0,0.10805509693643492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227155050790394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405882851046267,0.13447586014544313,0.0,0.09144089966581763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286386671538064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619593023492306,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Acepaladin,2020/03/01,"All of a sudden it kind of fell apart? I'm a freshman biochemistry major in college who's passion is science, writing, and volunteer work. While I haven't really made many friends here, and miss my best ones who are far away it's been okay. I focused on writing a book idea that was very passionate for me. Spending maybe 4-5 hours a day along with my classes, writing. And having a ton of fun. 
One week I had a bit of a medical incident that was very minor, but kept me from writing for a week. And then it was just bad... I've always had chronic depression and at one point planned to kill myself. But that was in HS and I've learned a lot since then. I've been questioning my religion and choices, college and major, and honestly every time i try to pick up my story i just can't. All of a sudden it kind of fell apart and I don't have any energy anymore. I can barely put up the face i used to. I just can't seem to figure out why I'm so sad. I don't hate myself and I have a mission. But for some reason it just feels not even worth it to get out of bed.
Maybe I'm just adjusting to something or need a break but. That one week off kind of broke me.",1.0538016967126185,2.8250464268292714,3.0195157299399082,92.46427889713681,80.66666666666666,6.22948038176034,22.890774125132555,7.255503002510835,0.7405081654294801,895,30,203,12,23,301,134,246,0.11699999999999999,0.789,0.094,-0.8565,0,0,1,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,0,3,8,17,2,0,13,1,19,5,1,4,2,47,31,20,1,1,11,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,12,15,0,1,8,1,2,3,6,7,0,4,10,1,20,10,30,21,9,29,0,4,0,2,8,14,0,5,11,132,32,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985037852888532,0.0,0.0,0.08977744279884282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092736712825498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240361903235421,0.0,0.11023034525167656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13854578889968674,0.0,0.1441305484344229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851413292384335,0.0,0.11370776577210916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719730019790319,0.0,0.11123169607352512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06675276991089728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199754699836604,0.0,0.0689744752934582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13034142424202774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001211553346326,0.0,0.0,0.1490333744115118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14605945622055705,0.4124323987353841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223782734815163,0.0,0.1249195638671273,0.0,0.1338465383497318,0.265261647338738,0.0,0.0,0.13299524698893142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789041097686607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578379470733048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480062129887673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271555249810504,0.14789148684195874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457474786480028,0.13573751319343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018513352248075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920747578497636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163467116791464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698133685963614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963223072667098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11402202277257878,0.0,0.21785899179967685,0.0,0.0,0.3176930203032641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912660751848722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961113997079569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Frenchie1791,2020/03/01,I want to disappear forever from the face of the Earth since there are people with Antisocial Personality Disorder who choose to overcome the disorder rather than just be at the mercy of it..... Like the title says.,6.222280701754388,8.477420526315793,7.0500000000000025,67.07833333333336,67.42105263157895,11.382456140350875,31.08771929824561,11.20814326018867,4.277866666666666,172,7,28,6,3,57,31,38,0.16399999999999998,0.695,0.141,-0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,2,1,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,8,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,21,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.790858102085634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685620042927143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391972004874953,0.3012629099184765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2743780818036551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854086131160973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20350494648932105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wLLouise,2020/03/01,"Feeling of being unable to be in romantic relationships Hey guys,

I just wanted to see if others are in the same situation.

As a 29 year old female I have been single for 5 years (prior to a 2 year relationship) but have had lots of short term relationships in that time.  
I just got broken up with again ( iand can see that my mental health, recently being told it was too much to handle is definately a big part of this.  
I'm using the time to work on myself and not being in a relationship but am scared I will never be capable of one.  
Do others feel the same? It makes me feel a bit alone",4.164249999999999,4.8151382583333335,6.091666666666669,78.10500000000003,70.58333333333334,9.0,23.333333333333336,9.188382445141503,1.6035833333333338,461,10,94,9,8,161,84,120,0.11199999999999999,0.862,0.026000000000000002,-0.9037,0,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,8,0,16,1,0,2,1,18,27,5,0,2,6,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,7,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,5,5,7,0,18,16,8,19,0,0,2,0,7,8,0,2,11,73,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15401625402746116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235021409333025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255731336085451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893507426640056,0.0,0.0,0.14724393082456927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806925395675914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642590691059016,0.0,0.0,0.0992634959683397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986231192920754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931721659754526,0.0,0.11469248972198252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15604363955467335,0.0,0.1007681368542442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16103586893277802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468308417545797,0.6386253578538786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888227720053918,0.0,0.2370014514618851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671536037106454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342522672824026,0.0,0.0,0.14209651062760628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284356440016266,0.0,0.0,0.08771161147385845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826092378671463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28728850926492394
mentalhealth,gildrop9,2020/03/01,"Struggling in life, but the problems are so blurred and confusing for me to understand I am looking for advice and maybe insight if anyone here can relate to my problems. I have always been a little ‘off’, and all of my close friends acknowledge that, but I have still been able to do relatively ok in most areas of my life. As I get older, (21), I have started to pay more attention to some of the kind of trends that have been messing my life progress up and just my general functioning. I have been diagnosed with adhd when younger, but I am fairly sure that I have also had a few periods of decent depression. That much is clear to me, but then there is this ‘other stuff’ which gets me the most because it is all so embarrassing and plain confusing.  I am very unsure if this is related to mental problems (my poorly handled adhd? Or even bipolar/autism?) or if these issues can be derived from personality flaws and poor work ethic. I don’t know what to do, if I need to do anything, and feel lost. 


The life problems: 


• Periods of feeling unmotivated and depressed
 - Don’t care about anything, mostly not sad but life feels meaningless
 - Very hard to eat, almost have to force feed myself to not lose weight. Food = disgusting
-Isolate myself from friends. Have ended multiple relationships because I get flaky and go ghost mode
- Depressed feeling times last for a few months I think, but normally are only very bad for a week or two. During the very bad times I think about suicide sometimes and feel really empty.


• The ‘weird stuff’ 
-Sometimes becoming enraged over tiny things, like chewing sounds, someones presence, or other tiny things other people do. Sometimes find myself getting really angry because I feel like whoever I am talking to is speaking too slowly and I know what they will say. Like want to claw my eyeballs out angry. 
- Days where I feel extremely angry and aggressive for NO REASON. Like, walking through the supermarket fuming over nothing. 
- Impulsive drug use. I normally only drink once a week and smoke marijuana occasionally, but sometimes I go through phases where I do lots of dangerous hard drugs on impulse. Its not an addictive thing imo, just concerning to me that I make those poor decisions. 
- Weird sexual stuff. Sometimes I will for seemingly for no reason get fixated on a sexual idea and I feel like I am ‘driven’ to achieve it right then. This is what makes me feel the most crazy out of all of it. Like, weird kinky stuff that can be unsafe and also leaves me feeling ashamed after it all plays out. Have had times with really high sex drive (need to get off multiple times per day) and sometimes have times where I have no sex drive whatsoever for week(s)
-Small problems with insomnia and maybe anxiety


•Personality duality
-The ‘good me’ is charismatic, sharp, funny, and very good socially. Very extraverted. This person can make friends with anyone, loves socializing, and is good at talking to women. When I am like this I am successful at everything I do, happy with my life, and start romantic relationships. Very motivated academically and socially. 

-The ‘bad me’ is awkward, introverted, and quiet. When I am like this I do not like to socialize or go out. I mostly isolate myself, and this kills my relationships because I flake out on plans and become distant from everyone. Gets the bare minimum done to continue functioning, barely goes to class. The days seem to blur together. 


Is this stuff objectively cause for concern? I feel like I am making myself have these problems by thinking about having them, and it is all just made up by me subconsciously. How do I even approach this?",5.908717557251912,7.892761253435117,6.147091603053436,74.32353816793896,67.76335877862597,9.392671755725187,32.031297709923656,9.791249743138472,3.3882207633587766,2891,124,479,68,50,923,301,655,0.20600000000000002,0.654,0.14,-0.9952,0,0,4,0,0,1,91.0,0,0,2,9,23,55,6,6,19,1,60,20,0,11,7,126,105,52,3,15,23,0,15,10,3,2,11,4,0,3,39,36,6,0,28,2,4,8,9,31,0,1,10,20,61,24,75,91,16,61,0,6,1,3,20,27,0,23,36,341,100,7,0.04820570116697059,0.0,0.0,0.0525513297007346,0.1158677700304762,0.04710605326854438,0.0,0.0,0.04827104641961442,0.0,0.0,0.0771001636139725,0.0401110050491253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03687722944792614,0.0,0.0,0.0674130941886515,0.0,0.07933836933696943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074924076281256,0.11754299200897388,0.10647881921865236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491489250812948,0.04952053397000012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326606788361788,0.0,0.1245584993358177,0.048927771962437236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04933116895577536,0.0,0.047223235041526236,0.11180661811292948,0.04932646686030038,0.0,0.0,0.042695943023785814,0.0,0.0,0.06367882196397708,0.0,0.0,0.046062613274979985,0.043324175887318336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681167602220457,0.10331448763691496,0.0,0.0,0.04405913754670035,0.0,0.05829052519827462,0.0,0.11173081542656847,0.0,0.17629842469959495,0.0,0.08218923262202618,0.12129796510456245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05131586527361106,0.08636567936188018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050931969959554034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054418368999397115,0.0,0.050314227783964986,0.0,0.0,0.05333246607242901,0.05019881967224423,0.052985185346739384,0.039294080380308884,0.0,0.05104287718204992,0.0,0.0,0.2042946740770954,0.2355087062616293,0.04831477666139729,0.0,0.0,0.04048064806417908,0.05392984906502465,0.05262221729085224,0.04098276327997143,0.043507527379421734,0.04561340000928004,0.1287107194094282,0.0,0.09685821221768147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048580008674388886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03847733076226025,0.0,0.03543673697678875,0.0714878332061742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446270420831147,0.04625467038465832,0.0,0.0,0.05133749847893257,0.0,0.07332521593913949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0334197635253489,0.12627407663527793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767580741678629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264541963525796,0.09912697889567536,0.0,0.1552646477198428,0.0,0.041167405405116576,0.0,0.0383351084031452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776931972578321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965585666105271,0.04084453416536117,0.0,0.28606002642432643,0.0,0.06824048679872807,0.0,0.03849713522178544,0.0,0.0,0.05039506543956742,0.2759199736161165,0.052729212974764336,0.0,0.04543330285882997,0.0,0.0,0.07749183319700947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607717757393652,0.09266480054067984,0.0,0.0,0.1405456600522018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04708996547779359,0.05018383498017714,0.0,0.041634248260143863,0.0,0.2784232638052977,0.02843297151492974,0.0,0.11600311725922095,0.0587015573298644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03509432457668454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rALLyArMoNd07,2020/03/01,"How do I open up to a doctor about my bad mental health I've been depressed since I was a little kid. I remember vividly from Kindergarten to now, that I was never able to get along with the other kids. All my interests were outside and foreign to the norm. I was never taught how to socialize with others and understand body language and social cues, which is disconcertingly difficult for me, knowing how to filter and think before I say things. I was always extremely sensitive to others yet I would pretend to be tough and rude to others just so I could feel stronger and more secure. And I would cling to friends or anyone who made me feel worthy and secure. But then hate them whenever I was excluded, humiliated, betrayed, insulted. I felt everyone was either good or bad, hated or liked me. But I think that I was mostly hated. I would always be dependent on everyone liking me and wanting me around to survive. There were plenty of times where I considered suicide and was hospitalized once. After that hospitalization, I knew that I would only get worse and would never be fixed. I just want to be normal and likeable. I paid people to like me, I bribed people to like me, I tried guilt tripping people to like me, lying, manipulating, etc. I just really wanted friends who would really want me around just as I did. I know thats pathetic. But I hate being mentally ill, it makes me feel disconnected, flawed, worthless, stupid, and it makes me not live any longer even while Im writing this. I wish I could tell someone this in person but Im so afraid to be judged and Im so ashamed of myself as a person. Other than Depression, I probably developed all sorts of disorders too. I did self-assessments and found BPD, DPD, and other problems. I just wish it could all go away.  Sorry about this elongated text. But how should I open up to my doctor? What problems or illnesses should I bring up? Thank you for the time. But in the end, knowing my past and luck, I might never be helped.",4.68732074438971,6.39754124603175,5.476517058930856,79.01452380952384,70.4021164021164,8.494216383871558,27.055646779784713,9.035553425615538,2.244339062214925,1573,53,285,31,29,512,198,378,0.183,0.7120000000000001,0.105,-0.9839,0,0,0,0,0,1,50.0,0,1,1,1,22,32,7,3,7,0,34,6,1,9,7,95,66,38,1,20,17,0,4,5,2,9,5,1,0,4,22,24,0,2,13,1,1,3,5,19,0,0,19,6,52,13,41,28,7,29,0,3,1,0,17,13,0,9,18,215,74,3,0.07785227813543355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12955866404930153,0.0,0.0,0.052942218800466664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05443612302792375,0.0,0.0,0.13861006636399265,0.0,0.0,0.0731447780485226,0.0,0.1300068007025137,0.0,0.0,0.06624655460202586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647633046868054,0.09805221896338312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18647612758084808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410810615997654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922545554827313,0.15937021111020352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895401064760172,0.0,0.08682586944133189,0.05142069546613181,0.0,0.0,0.14878237608898234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809335307350108,0.0,0.07475039587755666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536100460733731,0.1202969539330202,0.0,0.08134920418296239,0.0,0.044245243770820564,0.06529879722368365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30745202740725985,0.0,0.0827533311213146,0.0,0.0,0.052182740978589416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25228145971281085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835672815080482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19017345313254275,0.07802843521902111,0.06874498791344298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366570796108225,0.1039340003764981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15691357061855912,0.08258896420819775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401779053550177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627870296895023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291013539074353,0.0,0.059210165680008475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431880864916085,0.16191890142935472,0.13595521273101324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393792332650687,0.14898823199157468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974832579014536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819145473282944,0.0,0.0,0.06191125633493635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08121690504622156,0.0,0.0,0.0644002089768746,0.0,0.0,0.1587211867810133,0.06596398262396122,0.0,0.0,0.08714925151272852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515775634411009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804632256843028,0.0716759179236673,0.0,0.0,0.05172159426430765,0.09976919258394633,0.0,0.0,0.09079257890441532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05285658649620715,0.0,0.0,0.0810469671470391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18367716290900926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17905255545732904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933812252620145,0.3318241481785812,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Luna-uwu-,2020/03/01,"A Teacher threw me out of class because I am Asian Eventhough i have been dealing and struggling with mental issues for quite some time already I feel like this is the thing that I really don’t know handle with mentally. I guess I’m not the only Asian person who has experience this kind of racism since Corona “trended“ but it’s really difficult for me to handle this particular thing.A teacher I never had before in any class expelled me from his classes (dunno if this is the right word) with the reasoning being that he doesn’t want to risk getting infected with “The Virus“. I honestly didn’t attend school for the past days because of this and I am honestly afraid to go there, because Eventhough I know that the people in my class are probably on my side I really can’t handle bullying that well. I just don’t know what to do and nobody this far was really able to help me, so maybe someone over here might have a suggestion?",7.058508287292818,6.83110703314917,7.3109889502762435,74.88449447513814,64.30386740331492,10.554917127071825,32.4646408839779,10.125756701596842,3.160988508287293,747,26,136,15,10,243,111,181,0.125,0.7809999999999999,0.095,-0.7708,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,0,3,9,0,19,1,0,1,1,24,29,6,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,14,8,0,0,5,0,0,3,7,4,1,0,5,1,18,5,21,22,1,15,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,5,5,94,32,6,0.1502574405690464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16581282205589656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218021213413872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747866233952481,0.0,0.12785801494083096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690361867912124,0.15490882344461201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698060901884916,0.0,0.0,0.0759746766826461,0.107343945565383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850331105017075,0.0,0.08539476615946583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16552551096044185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071439512251956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15682972984545196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15647000211474216,0.24773267929559475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340819566554936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509537950242926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30284831833281994,0.15939939945732032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11588780124423348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11427755441234808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434377290069449,0.1041695901144232,0.1311990014052305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16200293463193394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15981728359912564,0.0,0.0,0.38503505596075976,0.15448967424636764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831903325325858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15206855171777406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429450755626263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273126417903284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570817012707892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19964873379263148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761632193413957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862573148366941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509948426474838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Beautycupcake,2020/03/01,"Anxiety and family. So a little background, my eldest sister suffers with a lot of mental issues one being borderline personality disorder. (21)
My brother has anger issues. (20)
I suffer with anxiety, panic disorder, depression and an eating disorder. (16)

So my sister and brother argue a lot, and it gets very out of control very quickly, tonight they kicked off, ended with my sister pulling a knife out on my brother while my younger sister (13) was with them at their house. I had to get to there’s very quickly baring in Mind I was just calming down after a major panic attack, you know the slowly coming back to reality phase.... 
police were called etc.. 

These situations happen too often but I am always the one my elder sister calls, she depends on me too much and I’m only 16. But tonight, after it calmed down a little, that my anxiety was spiking again and my brother told me to “stop making it about me when it’s not about me.” I am never the person to cause a scene I’m more of a ‘suffer in silence person’ so I was kind of hurt by him saying this, I ended up going outside because my blood pressure was going high and my chest was getting tight (my first sign of a panic attack) I had a full on meltdown, no one checked to see if I was okay, not even my mum. I dried my eyes went back in to the house and I lay down on the floor because it was cold and felt nice since my body temp was high and she laughed at me and said “go and take another pill” (on about the anxiety medication I used to be on) 

I feel bad that I made a point that my anxiety was bad but I equally felt like I needed to say something about it, to let them know that dealing with them constantly is affecting me severely. 

Do you think I shouldn’t have said anything? Any advice? X",2.866533333333333,4.712159348571434,4.46857142857143,83.80476190476192,75.5142857142857,6.838095238095237,25.095238095238088,7.675431598112923,1.4012666666666669,1372,47,264,19,30,460,185,350,0.172,0.778,0.05,-0.9896,0,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,0,2,5,2,19,22,4,4,18,1,23,7,4,7,1,50,49,21,0,3,7,10,4,1,0,1,2,4,0,3,12,20,1,3,6,0,1,6,5,15,0,4,20,11,49,7,45,25,8,48,0,5,2,0,32,25,0,5,18,194,61,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011164226579208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821540469752459,0.0,0.0,0.05575041866261353,0.08596503980805456,0.3135791695861048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746401599429715,0.0,0.0,0.1865322099690084,0.0,0.12607784996097324,0.13690271644013927,0.09995065892053616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106327119015586,0.0,0.0,0.16742511793837653,0.0,0.0,0.08421786643001951,0.0,0.070620040491228,0.0,0.08859317483204936,0.09194953235385774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451961080519825,0.07061078316954683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818746521142099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388782318103004,0.0,0.0,0.14522303935007055,0.0,0.09143135066445322,0.05414818957558184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772851218164119,0.0,0.04145244900503674,0.0,0.1574307220132282,0.0,0.0,0.06973365641960866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849628218728745,0.0,0.13977639698192426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07249621338776248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323649400347846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891919238482664,0.08776318633531922,0.0,0.0,0.17113534832263966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537140356085078,0.09011007968946408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383191995576897,0.0,0.0400521544841665,0.16433455301313146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393959477875046,0.0,0.07757313828093579,0.054723471792033455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258801396675766,0.08261834745536899,0.0,0.08277822294874022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06026603798809808,0.060788447798002174,0.06322939933589343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16665891849420128,0.06235083456143487,0.0,0.2885638490139558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21474997273022856,0.0,0.0,0.07749927676550329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559668844099407,0.13039039688191767,0.0,0.0,0.06532886091319069,0.0,0.0,0.09261607120967257,0.0,0.06781617192796828,0.0921509506426589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06311357610111536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854043527760179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06164009247094004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052530611506377736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833709980914204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07080593195968438,0.0,0.20293065201457414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599792729384484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lolimsosorry,2020/03/01,"venting: feeling like my life is falling apart. i’m a 20 F and a junior in college. i have bipolar type II and ADD. I dont take meds for bipolar disorder because they kept making me gain excessive amounts of weight. i’m still recovering from that weight gain.

i got a dui about 3 weeks ago. i had always had an issue with alcohol but never thought i’d drive until one night i did. thankfully nobody was hurt and nothing was injured, i just hit a curb. but the experience in jail traumatized me. it was beyond inhumane and disgusting. i have been washing my hands so much since getting out that my knuckles are dry and cracking even though i moisturize. parents are covering the lawyer, i’m paying for everything else like the breathalizer ($75/month for 6 months), victims impact unit ($60), counselling ($60 every other week), probation (dont know how much but not cheap for 18months-2yrs), and the impoundment of my car (~$180). 

and yes i know i shouldnt have done it. i feel nothing but shame and regret for the incident.

i’m a full time physics student and work a minimum wage job 4 days a week. my manager is a dick and minimum wage here is 7.25 no tips. i started off this semester ready to get my shit done. i’m repeating a class i failed last year and a class i dropped out of. after all this shit thats happened, my focus has been severely altered. i’ve been trying to shift it back to school. i studied hard for a differential equations exam (who i pay for a tutor in -$40/hr) and made a 55. i don’t know what happened. i know the material. i genuinely do. well it turns out i have severe test anxiety and my mind just blanks. i talked to my professor and showed him i can do the math correctly and he just said that next time i need to work on the anxiety. 

i also got a strike from my university for the dui. that’s another $75 to them + i have to take a class on alcohol and substance abuse. 

i’m sitting in the bathroom stall at my job and just crying. i was cleaning and just thought about the ways i could kill myself. my life is going downhill. everyone around me is doing well. i’m mentally suffering. i thought about running away. i just want to be happy. i’m tired of this and i’m tired of hurting.",2.2926061776061744,4.416572752252254,3.867541827541828,86.16310810810812,78.23423423423424,7.4718146718146725,27.01287001287001,8.418075326091056,2.001484298584298,1738,73,352,36,42,577,242,444,0.204,0.7120000000000001,0.084,-0.9959,7,0,2,0,1,1,69.0,0,0,2,5,21,17,5,1,27,1,35,16,4,3,3,59,72,28,1,5,11,1,6,2,0,1,10,1,1,0,15,25,4,2,9,1,5,5,7,11,2,1,20,7,48,6,43,48,5,43,0,5,0,1,8,16,3,0,21,215,63,24,0.0,0.10396786558854064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778393173403916,0.1875533572036559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017260696895213,0.07301395121635852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201216720312708,0.13425503692104845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811495045785274,0.0,0.0,0.08244279601607997,0.06747333705144695,0.0,0.05349079556755704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006020004972355,0.0,0.09638783109614213,0.05659065487768222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056761709398164,0.0,0.0,0.17959477999474696,0.20568165538245184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330278261081549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057957191482719925,0.0,0.0739320677778969,0.08384764715913592,0.0788628771792538,0.0858350702695623,0.0,0.0,0.08873676269671596,0.06268769174466482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169015239990701,0.0,0.049869610711781635,0.0,0.14036130933671714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551917784886172,0.09341012719885387,0.07860560327487348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878736052096371,0.0,0.0,0.09158684925515924,0.17415409795141298,0.0,0.09708094003855793,0.0,0.19289757179399855,0.07152690550799617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395900949177027,0.08573916893358569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302994549777422,0.05857294136903792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09746902872983088,0.0,0.08843005502100862,0.0,0.08860117680098571,0.0,0.14008035688812162,0.0,0.12901078802295454,0.06506455223306105,0.0676772101407485,0.0,0.09332174230157124,0.08234621454103616,0.0,0.16839449636617035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0594607928549422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743455154808853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346911185361683,0.0,0.0,0.08880637323261993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982621179230271,0.18014556755926325,0.0725866348046241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062108984404662074,0.0,0.07007622844679368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13195221004994964,0.07052908449667511,0.0,0.0807872173284358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621265625732692,0.20898800829879696,0.10233395003844363,0.20170845402261006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05957561011016167,0.09544539239007176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051756459170859456,0.06965083695149624,0.21116015253512024,0.21370856391944024,0.15779324636978706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776420333895244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0565072884884752
mentalhealth,Ladygabz,2020/03/01,"Today started okay This is my first post and I'm not even sure what I'm looking to get from it but my struggle with anxiety and depression has been getting overwhelming lately and I needed to vent.

I woke up later than I wanted to and it took a while to get out of bed but I got up, got dressed and went out to run some errands. The sun was actually out for a bit and I listened to some happy music and actually felt okay for a short time. Did my shopping and returned home.

Had a dream about my mom being over my house this morning and texted to tell her.

I was met with a cold response. And I can't even blame her, I haven't reached out in a while. I don't talk to friends or family often and when I feel the urge to, the overwhelming guilt and shame from the gap in contact mixed with the repeated apology I know I owe them stops me from even sending a short text. 

Most of my family does not take anxiety/depression seriously and my mother has been seeing counselors for years so thinks what may have worked for her will work for everyone so I avoid telling her. Her overwhelming concern just feels embarrassing and intensifies my anxiety. 

I know I need to be open with people close to me about what's going on in order to have even a chance to repair the damage I've caused to our relationships but I'm not sure that's even possible anymore. Every day I find myself isolating more and more. I have tried to seek out professional help but the people I've gone to so far have been terrible for me and I'm so scared and anxious to try again.

I just don't know where to go from here.",3.0965849011669486,4.681621931888547,4.269860681114552,86.57666051440823,74.26315789473685,7.817527982853061,25.116575375089308,8.502166056373571,1.5435316503929504,1256,41,265,23,26,411,169,323,0.159,0.772,0.069,-0.985,1,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,1,3,18,19,0,9,15,2,22,0,0,1,2,59,54,29,0,3,10,2,3,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,8,28,0,2,8,2,2,7,7,13,0,1,15,7,37,6,49,35,6,42,0,5,2,0,20,18,0,6,15,180,45,3,0.0,0.0,0.21962966145313292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17217308004529738,0.12712893416127688,0.11160133467372624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285561013978764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560118515874812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257371921025793,0.0,0.19384699625867996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847736058191488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3716310537467259,0.0,0.09481291812480616,0.10752898361965622,0.0,0.0,0.21216998377747595,0.0,0.11379894637194758,0.0,0.10804820174498918,0.0,0.10285205164702806,0.09571951498270508,0.0,0.0,0.08694181077752103,0.0,0.17637970586308432,0.0,0.12790886172794694,0.0,0.18000396485611886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197922228922216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542771190264684,0.0,0.11287859826465975,0.0,0.0,0.12984662012007087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18553364829374616,0.0,0.1269408029588969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449839323316314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13179591630124152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16688184840799744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603080021697216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12686272728597206,0.10777438407264453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081706887182628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266399066131365,0.0,0.08967329697091342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796506067010696,0.0,0.0,0.09408164662982904,0.0,0.1176426993799366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21211983131437434,0.0,0.08460992951960546,0.09044882031285473,0.1967155545482761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210585122453847,0.0,0.0,0.06561821357094309,0.0,0.10666701446667956,0.0,0.1250270009329512,0.15280344817567368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637418745730855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431813149858256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384902133196869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246680740768273
mentalhealth,throwaway99993292,2020/03/01,"I just needed a place to express this I can ignore it most of the time, I live a pretty normal and happy live now and id think I'd make my small self proud.

but sometimes the fact that I've been abused consistently for the first 16 years of my life still creeps back up into my chest and heart and makes me feel like I can't breathe, and that I don't deserve to, my memories haunt me just well I thought Id escaped it all. a new chapter of my life has started and im so much luckier than most people that have felt the way I've felt in the past, because most people don't survive. I'm loved now, or so I hope, and my life finally has happiness, but my past self, the little me that was a burden to all, taken advantage of by so many, that me haunts me, reduced me into a ball of fear and hallucinations and I'm starting to think I'm crazy

idk if this is the right place to post, but I just needed somewhere",6.528410256410254,4.2121644051282034,7.141025641025639,82.45564102564103,66.48717948717949,10.102564102564104,31.92307692307693,8.167268648758528,2.0223846153846154,709,20,164,7,9,236,107,195,0.139,0.722,0.139,-0.036000000000000004,0,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,11,11,0,1,12,0,10,7,3,2,3,38,28,17,0,5,8,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,9,11,0,1,6,1,0,0,3,3,1,1,6,3,21,8,17,22,6,24,0,0,0,1,4,9,0,6,14,101,30,0,0.0,0.1526261993045351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905174959839977,0.0,0.07852519409758807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495410117877386,0.06513336958646276,0.0920263591062606,0.24736761391119125,0.14111191208359342,0.0,0.1095710416444129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27425459992295226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526478837207069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794360795593676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13914366158321895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729601937269498,0.06293311597667826,0.12910772987055466,0.22749422834304744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162617004649461,0.0,0.1719717024608991,0.1305994651883137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469477003188988,0.1910312433667592,0.0,0.12441154285941368,0.0,0.0,0.12621258071045868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24593938464725934,0.17860994501982144,0.0,0.26917114099239003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337036525475885,0.13105244274755135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11000837888094853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687668978160909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12740257111949,0.0,0.1823536181816748,0.0,0.1028728285310622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16508051109028862,0.0,0.10226571843876127,0.07511379485273065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224834819979647,0.0,0.0,0.11582128445656575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295344553030308
mentalhealth,someinputplease,2020/03/02,"Struggling and need advice  

Hello. This may be a long one but I appreciate any input or advice on how to handle my current situation...

Ok so for the past few months I may have been suffering from depression or just struggling with my mental health. There has been some rough patches and some good patches, just like in anyone's life. I am somewhat close with my family so whenever I am upset about something I will vent to them and others times I may not. Sometimes I get into fights with my parents and do what any young adult would do and just overreact.

  
Lately though I have had a feeling that instead of discussing things with me, about how I feel or why I am upset, my family has contacted my friends to check in on me and make sure I am ok and do not harm myself. I would never harm myself and it truly hurts knowing my family thinks I would do such a thing. I have a very strong feeling that they are discussing things with my friends because there has been more than 1 occasion where it seemed like my friends were acting weird towards me or taking extra precaution with how they spoke to me.   


It also puts me in a very awkward spot with my friends because now they know about my personal situations which I would have liked to keep private between my family and I. It hurts the fact my family went behind my back to contact my friends and inform them of whatever is going on in my life and how they are worried about me and to tell them to keep an eye out for me/try to make them hang out with me to make me happier. It just makes me feel even worse that everyone knows about my mental situation now.

  
The hardest part of what I'm dealing with is how to bring this up to either party. I want to know exactly what my family has said to my friends and how long this has been going on but I am afraid they will not give me the truth. I haven't even considered telling my family I know what is going on because they will just deny it and then it will make me feel even worse because I will be upset knowing that they are lying.  


I know my family cares about me a lot if they are willing to go to this length to make sure I'm okay. But the part that hurts the most is that they don't understand that I would rather keep things private and not in my friend circle. I feel as if now my friends will look at me so differently because of all the things my family may have put in their head...",6.6970686070686085,5.7651760207900224,6.755595841995845,80.89683659043659,65.29937629937629,10.024482328482328,31.298212058212066,9.174902378510234,2.3809300790020784,1890,58,390,28,25,605,198,481,0.126,0.7020000000000001,0.171,0.9764,3,0,1,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,14,1,35,36,1,7,14,3,53,5,2,12,7,103,95,37,0,10,20,1,7,3,8,16,3,2,0,2,29,28,0,3,17,0,1,10,7,16,0,1,9,11,77,20,60,68,12,43,0,5,2,0,38,19,0,16,17,305,106,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141098756663683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046691929557819416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941009773376301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04082543145940522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044895870863556335,0.0,0.1779603585012276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05952926790735045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060194261455486675,0.050288494033422206,0.0,0.0,0.06100181387601501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569185836052262,0.0,0.0,0.05579112140547191,0.0,0.0,0.4953771919232621,0.0,0.1771328237038649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3608761810644369,0.0,0.030504710612336217,0.0560099708420994,0.13273033173532425,0.04897210569293504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059921735647684236,0.062062473589415565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18751293814913847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556907006579821,0.0,0.0,0.22461513673866307,0.0,0.06586289120185908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248069423739178,0.08557457266688626,0.0,0.0,0.1033410204260985,0.049030234937789186,0.0,0.0,0.04963839780507103,0.0,0.0,0.2338419879661124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117680390630546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04660381335945149,0.0,0.0,0.043293097132921225,0.045031525335230936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03956442936006988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483166885040996,0.1264545015860342,0.05573683906722355,0.0,0.05098113082053683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738978819299492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553924899280431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05315318025124551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19688774108794285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04494903685698985,0.0577460711583239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207719077470552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110057798957984,0.0,0.043899632369200865,0.0,0.10206533175248376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19394808852620773,0.03741192527163202,0.05736476734775811,0.0,0.03404583207719875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03964082725127408,0.0,0.0,0.06078275266878998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635050460144318,0.03443806707704554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05412517949407556,0.05268503563267359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059294663459714785,0.11900234267785142,0.20738165615828208,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PsychoChicken38,2020/03/02,"After Uni? Hey guys, at the moment I'm doing alright. I'm doing a degree so the same routine every day means I don't really get anxious about what's going on, I've been at this place for 5 years. I also have a 10 hour a week job cleaning at my uni which is nice and quiet.

But 6 months from now I'll have my degree, and I don't want to be cleaning my uni for the rest of my life. So what do I do? I get SO anxious about answering the phone, taking public transport, learning to drive, serving the public, I have absolutely no idea how I'm going to cope after I get my degree and that scares me so much. What do you guys do?",0.8948284313725487,2.3842031397058854,3.4064705882352966,90.82578431372549,80.10294117647058,5.415686274509804,19.42156862745098,5.985473137389443,-0.1009490196078433,481,11,108,3,12,168,79,136,0.049,0.877,0.07400000000000001,0.4796,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,9,3,0,1,8,1,14,1,0,1,0,11,25,10,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,2,6,3,0,0,4,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,1,1,14,2,15,23,3,18,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,9,72,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15959495577340432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4509114782562778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12870525198511873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814517226743958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31279910600145633,0.0,0.2268388951120233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952086259630997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19653489369413368,0.0,0.0,0.22528868387889275,0.0,0.0,0.1980410644613103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409612204254231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173887360786829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929377094522035,0.0,0.14670590062248426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085067351004271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784877019048613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19980300672896856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15005076793314934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771074453619758,0.0,0.1600819116394827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851565014797492
mentalhealth,xacex99,2020/03/02,"How do I (20F) become okay with never receiving justice? My father sexually abused me from ages 8-12. He forced me to sleep with him every night and would ""cuddle"" me and make me feel ""special."" I even have a memory of me asking him to touch me. He was extremely manipulative and brainwashed me. He left my family once my mother found out he put us in thousands worth of debt, and he then left the country.

For years my mother asked if he touched me. I said no. At 18 I finally spoke up and said it happened. My mother then proceeds to sit me down and explain there is reason to believe my father raped his younger sister and got her pregnant. *yup.* My father got my aunt (his blood sister) pregnant and she had the baby. The baby is now around 30. My mother just never thought this was relevant i guess? That my father has a history of being sexually abusive? 

My sister was raped. Brutally. My father ended up finding out through his employee/my sisters friend. One night my father gave her some beers and told her they were going to a fire at a campsite with a few buddies. He got her tipsy, brought her to some sketchy fire site, and proceeded exchange a few words to the men, and then left my sister with a bunch of middle aged men who raped her. My sister confronted my father about this and all he could say was ""I hope you learned your lesson for being a slut."" This rape was planned by my father to teach my sister a lesson from the first rape. 

Just to say 3 things out of **many** that he has done to prove what a monster he is.

​

I will never in this life receive any form of justice for what my father has done to me and my sister. And I am not okay with that. I am not okay with accepting the torture he put me through. I will never be the person I could have. I will never fully recover from this. I will always have those memories, I will always be that girl who got touched. 

Honestly, this is the best I have been doing in my whole life. And yet...it is just not enough. I want more. I want some form of justice.",1.6529962007828694,4.001849433168322,3.0286414920561846,90.08287934607417,81.89603960396039,5.540317752705504,21.524061708496433,6.8252276405021135,0.5572142067695145,1577,49,318,18,43,512,187,404,0.154,0.7979999999999999,0.048,-0.993,2,0,1,0,1,0,64.0,1,2,1,5,9,18,8,0,18,4,38,12,2,4,7,63,61,20,0,7,7,22,6,0,1,6,2,5,0,4,17,25,1,0,11,1,3,6,9,9,0,3,22,11,65,9,46,27,13,43,0,0,0,7,68,17,0,6,19,235,82,2,0.0,0.2324618103489613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16325193543606034,0.10628988847846084,0.11920064449550333,0.06671047242480548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732863128409422,0.18341806361372268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834229470878373,0.0,0.1105236294168382,0.10294852183163992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566476415070716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007780358405466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868863211650289,0.10136216910481843,0.0,0.06479325885237491,0.0,0.08265237639151027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247871337043304,0.0,0.04960164466254652,0.0,0.0,0.10746231870487546,0.08966042448117716,0.08344269469640396,0.0,0.10756014902724996,0.0757908037287068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055751745608291436,0.0,0.31383393211604177,0.0,0.1080667656085158,0.0,0.08674834665143702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743413274896072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197535376900869,0.0,0.13858001023874567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548163661451023,0.09945667338444772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3782987825042813,0.0,0.0,0.18411794836060474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447190212345864,0.06647421043799878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08565599133730371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19723255484353752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086179054120592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866286351063684,0.1560240296721538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816953463733524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517240996151183,0.0,0.0,0.07787940128639896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373750120663253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800064421868825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572229676932205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952368289244503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696864940322344,0.0,0.11920064449550333,0.063172339383823
mentalhealth,Mother-Wasabi,2020/03/02,"im extremely sensitive and jumpy im a dude, almost 16 and i wanna get stronger emotionally

literally the simplest things make me anxious, make my heart race and make me feel like im under pressure

also im very jumpy with the smallest things, anything sudden (movement/sound) or something im just not expecting, whatever it is

i was pretty damn emotional as a kid too but id say ive gotten only a little bit better from back then

recently i walked in on a family member crying and only seeing that made me very anxious and it made my heart speed up but i guess i managed to calm down eventually. thing is, i still hate the fact that i got so startled by that

is there any way to keep this stuff from happening as many things are expected to happen in life and id rather keep calm in most situations or at least, if i do get startled and anxious, i want it to be on a more natural level rather than on a im-about-to-have-a-heart-attack level  
i really hate it and id do anything to get stronger",3.5404411764705905,4.707203534313726,5.2738039215686285,81.47511764705884,72.48039215686275,8.381176470588235,27.32549019607843,8.841846274778883,2.0692631372549024,787,28,158,15,15,269,119,204,0.16,0.721,0.11900000000000001,-0.8543,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,9,10,3,3,9,0,9,3,2,5,1,34,29,18,0,7,9,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,13,9,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,5,3,16,4,23,23,4,21,0,0,1,0,2,13,1,6,7,96,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845595528045594,0.0,0.0,0.07064243610412148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060071652727831465,0.0,0.0,0.299384323930891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453863500096736,0.0,0.0,0.1004951927592208,0.0,0.06792509366935195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812620015460278,0.09644026364645067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703317994779284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987326955239566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327551810650391,0.0,0.044665442539870884,0.06310740686243423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384560730760673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065053768557414,0.0,0.0973122956425181,0.0,0.15623083948723396,0.0,0.0,0.17442744032399565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140365064381923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5725095993674068,0.0,0.0,0.1570345664642528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06239447831421599,0.04315661071058074,0.08853609028059499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16717171765188565,0.17689532055963614,0.0895590531419224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13436733825199945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986968413295572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05659043881057917,0.0,0.08722135150435682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702485006250488,0.0,0.0,0.07039252332133106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929360242199543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800553102393564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054541229543784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011238274596606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347466139177304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457732509529037,0.05210298602089414,0.07011717266142962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,commonommoc,2020/03/02,"What’s wrong with me? When I was 19 I visited a doctor about how I believe I’m not “normal”. He asked me why and I explained how when I was in school, the school advised me to see a therapist because of my behaviour. I was in top sets and one of the smartest in my classes but still didn’t land any grades because I would rarely show up to school. I would be too busy roaming the streets doing whatever I wanted. 

I explained to him that I had smoked weed since I was around 13 and it may have made me worse. I told him my symptoms and then he offered me pills, I refused to take any. I basically begged him to let me see a mental health professional. He refused and told me that waiting times very long, and he told me to keep a diary about my feelings and see him again in a month. Not sure if it’s relevant, but when I was very young, I found pleasure in killing frogs and fish. I would pick up the frogs and just slam them on the ground. I would also cut the eyes off of snails and slugs... fucking crazy I know. I wouldn’t do nothing like that now, but I thought this behaviour might be worth mentioning. 

I’m now 21, didn’t re-visit my doctor all that time ago. Lately I can feel myself going insane. If I’m not thinking of suicide then I’m thinking of killing someone else. Someone completely random or just somebody I don’t like. I don’t even know why, I just obsess over it. I abuse drugs, alcohol and I sleep around with girls. I am quite a popular person and have good social skills, so nobody would have a clue as to what really goes on inside my head. my life is just full of self destructive behaviours, most of which I don’t even want to get into. I can’t hold down a job, I cut relationships off with family and it doesn’t effect me in the slightest. I’ve ignored my own mother for 9 months and I don’t miss her at all. 

Surely, this behaviour and thoughts aren’t normal. What does it sound like I have? I’m not ready to see a doctor right now because I don’t want any of this on my records, I just want some advice on what might be wrong with me... and maybe somebody here might be able to come up with a conclusion.",2.6099319727891164,3.997104641723357,3.639192743764173,91.41334693877552,75.14512471655328,6.763356009070295,24.164625850340137,7.33818517376401,0.8292029931972786,1661,51,369,19,35,535,213,441,0.16899999999999998,0.758,0.073,-0.9929,2,0,3,0,1,1,47.0,0,0,1,5,25,19,6,1,17,0,40,13,3,5,4,86,77,32,3,14,15,1,2,3,0,10,9,1,0,3,17,25,1,6,13,1,1,3,15,11,0,1,15,8,62,8,48,47,6,49,0,1,5,1,28,27,1,10,21,240,79,11,0.07935060172812929,0.09401748754141633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754048963937536,0.07033952069064549,0.08480166118842143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634566475334022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618833906696151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127771768508826,0.07418210107194467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14511417092343035,0.0,0.0,0.0894009552462055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835351720633201,0.08319759620356855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436561097248979,0.0694402463065547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202150585589806,0.0,0.06628724569703105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482064813616196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480468528657616,0.0,0.08024409690510809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700383909031657,0.0,0.07335835265909403,0.04145741432763899,0.0,0.045096775597430284,0.06655551996575547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143661002221345,0.08434597903558022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874322821646086,0.07053046075587795,0.17557936808486554,0.0,0.08721803102453342,0.0,0.08951093501826088,0.0,0.0,0.08114136643476258,0.056047676676664215,0.11630008755195505,0.0,0.0,0.07022278551157934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508345797243983,0.0,0.0,0.0797183448816835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996674308124686,0.2525353462858019,0.0,0.0,0.12667378650098715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549348393114265,0.07613904245570327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053770021340694266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928588473361343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439913239649685,0.0,0.0,0.05083402735532186,0.0,0.0,0.08519285012230844,0.0,0.06776498031150058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409211358259281,0.2529286240811217,0.0,0.08277998332563671,0.0,0.0,0.06563963773600129,0.0,0.07940790778371005,0.08088794560492064,0.134467014683617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336949304143492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679667916675954,0.0,0.14957400610592778,0.08247565799828342,0.059661777195322466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213216455345198,0.0,0.10168932310103512,0.0,0.1259910284478208,0.09253994797661537,0.0,0.0,0.22746870133967664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13094511338598794,0.18721216320979986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320315172613896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086504227252404,0.2818419539383862,0.17351485264712507,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JohnJohn006,2020/03/02,Blog I everyone I’m attaching a link to a blog I’ve started. I’ve struggled with my mental health since my early 20’s. It’s a perspective as to what my life looks like day to day. I’ve created this in the hopes of helping others as I’ve relied on others for help. [JL’s blog](https://thementalthoughts.wordpress.com),3.57431693989071,6.157849737704924,4.624180327868854,80.01747267759565,76.21311475409836,7.3453551912568305,23.281420765027317,8.344100000000001,1.5388010928961742,258,8,48,5,6,84,41,61,0.042,0.747,0.212,0.8316,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,2,10,4,0,6,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,5,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849530674860496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851832077678132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172399990242678,0.0,0.0,0.4000915122767169,0.0,0.0,0.2964296910600545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108051278498639,0.14580833247127206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506241015581529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007689256457288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468821732751269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21124551497677524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120063191362853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wekkins,2020/03/02,"Was finally in the right place to talk to my GP, and now I can't find a psychiatrist. I spoke to my doctor almost a month ago now, about my mental health, and requested an ADHD screening. She submitted a referral, so far so good, they finished it in a timely fashion, great, I call the guy, aaaand he's not taking new patients.

Queue like three full afternoons of calling my insurance for alternatives, calling probably a dozen possibilities only for most of them to either specifically be child psychologists, only take referrals from doctors in their own hospital, or to not answer the phone, or call me back. The only person who currently seems like an option is someone I'm really not comfortable seeing. (Old white Christian, which is not an issue in basically any aspect of my life, but I've realized is for me, when it comes to therapy.)

I'm just getting so burnt out. It took me like 8 years to even manage to talk to a doctor about this. There are only so many people I can call, before I just run out of possibilities, and I really don't know what to do at this point, aside from potentially just eating the cost of seeing someone who doesn't take my insurance.

I'm just very exhausted and frustrated right now. I don't know if there even is really any advice for this situation. I'm just tired of sitting here, being pretty sure of what's wrong with me, and being unable to actually do anything about it despite having fucking insurance. It shouldn't be this hard, right?",7.096374555160142,7.163850797153027,7.930549377224199,69.4852190836299,64.16014234875445,11.295462633451958,32.50911921708185,10.9516,3.657001601423488,1178,42,207,30,16,397,159,281,0.073,0.86,0.068,-0.5171,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,3,0,22,11,2,0,14,0,19,9,0,0,1,34,36,14,0,2,14,0,1,3,0,1,7,1,0,3,14,9,1,0,6,0,1,3,9,4,0,2,3,6,21,7,35,28,4,33,1,0,4,1,20,14,1,7,18,141,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.08974147922786208,0.0,0.11052024729180868,0.08986403474946106,0.0815186125468413,0.0,0.09208648765617804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250743941404225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567674942345376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071296986048757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825274297594954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4695165456235865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921697262998073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823804855124088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409990912913402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147984118204196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073968836068008,0.08405144546830152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501722884623701,0.04804625994868513,0.0,0.0,0.07713321887425831,0.0,0.10138824087453516,0.0,0.09105666870207113,0.0,0.0,0.08237973543539702,0.0,0.0,0.09775112365529494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959842568044174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010796321666274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495535929580551,0.13478371309931855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323486039469432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926758937488737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340305435851914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881730727809985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096498469651181,0.0,0.0,0.2797644589582566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06375475299617535,0.08029752175032495,0.0960805379888788,0.0,0.08693365287915346,0.20734628884274667,0.0,0.09355824073500857,0.09915040532241112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17673930698500412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356046979003171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656334238581673,0.08371859506898216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336894858893443,0.0,0.0,0.1558379181816344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866729352937542,0.0,0.20743155133647093,0.1478308690290046,0.0,0.0,0.10516636575324624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05362368189419441,0.10569659404151624,0.0,0.0,0.10217297547982246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587813975845131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005458233520801,0.0,0.05922040264196085
mentalhealth,Dagdog31,2020/03/02,"Looking for ways to practice positive mental health Hello,

I've been in a downward spiral for the last year and a half. I fell into a major depression and it only perpetuated itself. Small everyday decisions have become mountain of a tasks. As I'm working my my self destructive behaviors I have a question.

I'm searching for ways to: Affirm faith in other people, believing others like me and I'm worthy of good things, practiceing positive efforts resulting in positive reward, practicing courage, accepting good things, and dealing with adversity with a calm assertiveness.

What are some good ways to do this? What has worked for others?",6.184864864864862,9.078923207207206,6.9173783783783795,65.2387702702703,69.18018018018019,10.205765765765767,34.523423423423424,10.355215969177356,4.716505585585585,520,26,71,16,10,171,76,111,0.079,0.622,0.299,0.9806,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,4,0,12,1,0,7,0,6,1,0,1,0,12,10,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,10,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,1,1,5,9,16,9,2,13,1,1,1,0,4,6,0,2,4,50,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20964664718609827,0.0,0.21386761656064865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19570109837021607,0.16349587618086367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4776482662236966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017749525509641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547325987730288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273883954234773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594050761428602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19129881442323726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14437036199913456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316006586897674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126472898023261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19802873116991196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25222240814068897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4520224214236431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763895218505117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224098799383347
mentalhealth,HelplessLilCreature,2020/03/02,"(Vent+Rant) Identity Hello, so for a while I've been struggling with my identity and I feel like it has turned for the worst I guess.

Basically I've been quite depressed since last week and on top of that my identity issues don't really help. And no, these thoughts aren't just something that pops up when I'm depressed - they've been here since the beginning of last year. I really wanna be able to figure out who I am and who I'm supposed to be.

I consider myself to have no actual personality and I don't know if my sexuality is actually for me or because of the chances I might have a disorder or something of the sort. The same goes for my gender identity. All my friends seem to have it figured out for them, not seeming to bat an eye at their pronounces or sexuality while I keep saying ""oh I'm x, y, z-"" and so forth - but in the end I keep hesitating and thinking over it on repeat.

I don't know if when I'm with my friends that I'm truly me because I consider myself to have no other personality traits than ""being weird and saying weird, unexpected things"" - I'm basically nobody in a conversation and can't keep them up for longer than what seems to be 5-10 minutes or even less. I have so many walls with who I'm with and where I am, I have so many different ways to speak to people and I really don't know how to just be the same, general me whenever.

If anybody have any tips in regarding what to do, please tell me and how I can properly discover who I am. :'] Sorry for it being so long.

TDLR: I have so many walls depending on where and who, I barely have any personality traits (or so it feels like - I can't keep long conversations with friends), I don't know if I truly identify with my gender and-/or- sexuality, and I just really wanna be able to figure out who I am and who I'm supposed to be.

Extra: I know it isn't actually ""necessary"" to label myself with certain things but I have an urge to because otherwise I feel even more lost than before. I've tried.",3.955884861407248,4.867963696517414,5.8600319829424325,78.6207089552239,71.23880597014927,9.424449182658137,28.287491115849328,9.696096459569628,2.502131201137172,1554,56,321,37,28,540,164,402,0.081,0.848,0.071,-0.0075,1,0,2,0,0,0,50.0,0,0,3,3,19,13,0,1,12,0,39,1,1,3,2,73,68,39,0,6,15,0,3,2,3,1,0,3,0,3,22,25,0,4,16,0,0,0,13,7,0,0,5,7,44,6,51,54,7,32,0,3,1,0,24,18,0,16,15,226,66,0,0.1841524106760581,0.0,0.2695592827728477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522995411495758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16838640046086795,0.0,0.07835006900969367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15861020147411814,0.0,0.0,0.09620003715691863,0.10552730842570902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155218826383365,0.0,0.0,0.12163093046878748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396694879979763,0.1315585189823674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134135435177752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10143232094301702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06171673955497185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610363622373724,0.0,0.3273662478020944,0.0,0.0,0.25301337226491044,0.15010879319582812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08996756595876351,0.0,0.0,0.16296908850989714,0.0,0.0,0.10051205495035404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800524608426284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767830318157457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383404730593982,0.24119217286909414,0.0,0.10107202349563182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793437826113573,0.0,0.0,0.23594549954210906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14644538830614928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514681575979513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233277708973916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176952261120546,0.0,0.10307177348596214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625804170682548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047866188846825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122342678928572,0.058998714506388585,0.0,0.07309822202645383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251369938366623,0.10015247105981873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308580600274729,0.0738579779710783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05929405740071665
mentalhealth,Cyanide_Revolver,2020/03/02,"Focusing on bettering myself I'm going thorugh a nasty breakup (my fault and I'm owning up to that) and aside from that feel like I've lost a bit of direction in life and have been feeling quite miserable because of it.

My first step into focusing on bettering my mental health is to quit drinking. I noticed I was feeling like a drink would help me feel at ease when I was upset, and if I was out drinking heavily I'd be getting extremely upset, so I've decided to stop drinking until I feel healthy again.

In the free time I have now that I'm single I'm reflecting on my behaviours, attitudes, and goals and trying to learn from mistakes so I don't repeat the same faults I've done before. I want to recognise which traits of mine are flawed and work on them so I can be a better person.

I still feel bad for how my relationship ended, but I've owned up to what I done (we were trying to see each other again and weren't actually together, and I lightly flirted with a customer in front of her, not to be malicious or cruel, I honestly wasn't thinking) and apologised to her. I told her I can understand if she doesn't want anything to do with me and I'm giving her space to heal (this also gives me time to reflect on what happened and learn from it).

I know I've done bad things and feel like a terrible person, which doesn't help with already feeling miserable, but I'm wanting to become a better person and find a path that will lead me to being happy.",6.8311261261261285,5.663042472972973,7.533702702702701,76.19688288288289,65.14864864864866,10.731171171171171,34.5981981981982,9.888512548439397,3.206406576576576,1156,44,228,21,15,387,152,296,0.134,0.7240000000000001,0.142,0.0893,0,0,4,0,0,0,24.0,1,0,1,11,10,23,1,4,10,0,26,7,0,2,0,53,54,26,0,7,6,0,8,3,0,2,3,0,0,3,13,21,4,1,17,4,1,4,6,12,0,1,12,10,34,12,39,36,6,30,0,3,1,0,16,14,0,3,15,158,47,5,0.0,0.0,0.09275893150250636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489438392085787,0.07601459963883136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822129160896513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15873213515229845,0.05794399816483178,0.10497960618405916,0.08088389993170235,0.0,0.0,0.33626993368700386,0.1037742812173572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918195408765049,0.0,0.3724666861465921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418957530116743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3844970156301192,0.2037196562625153,0.0,0.0,0.08687757701301899,0.08085283085161554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0496617592430772,0.1823687969062223,0.05402134331531541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840558831900741,0.10118668420534556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103789085548534,0.0,0.0,0.12742530158225307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05223915828619275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713940727834215,0.13931565780510935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376260158147864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09579201227960557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821953808781523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24899229600219006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022031263346339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205235614959753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574568167427477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591019743557706,0.07946934815306418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314961253327486,0.060906725170125874,0.0,0.0,0.11085343095596016,0.0,0.0,0.09082811092196892,0.0,0.12907076839162435,0.0,0.0,0.09895450140570193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681958256590258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920039873452159,0.0,0.0,0.0675235901133138,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,miss764375,2020/03/02,"Does anyone else do this,? Does anyone else create a fantasy world or scenario in their head to escape their mind? I've fantasized that I'm happy and in love with someone and we get married, I've dreamt of living in a fantasy world and i met all kinds of people and go on adventures I mean when it's over I'm miserable again but for that short time it makes me happy and I'm not a depressed mess while I'm imagining it all in my head ..",1.9825000000000017,3.675830293478264,3.77326086956522,88.49293478260874,77.58695652173913,7.208695652173913,22.369565217391305,8.07648339933343,1.0893217391304342,345,10,74,6,8,116,59,92,0.022000000000000002,0.7559999999999999,0.222,0.9522,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,2,0,2,8,0,1,3,0,1,3,2,1,2,16,11,9,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,7,5,11,10,2,14,0,2,0,1,5,9,0,1,4,41,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25985431544513965,0.38078175160057137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004340584637508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3252183936914731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3104515423613285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708140747884944,0.0,0.105603750710463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3956100577384268,0.0,0.0,0.3814024993831739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934992018847424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16407929864300494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677065691755997,0.0,0.12403389981251894,0.0,0.0,0.2024085497399256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18762160871118366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12882170560092635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574416453206248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083510458055738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oettinger_disgusting,2020/03/02,"I need your help pls Im a 17 years old guy from Germany and first of all im not really mentally ill or anything. Im just not really happy, even though my life over all is going great. I live in a house with a more or less healthy family, i have my own room where I can get privacy and time on my own if I want to, I have good grades and I just nailed the theoratical test for my drivers license. I also have many friends, some of them good ones. I have a couple of Hobbys and I spend as much time on them as school allows. But heres the point: I dont see any meaning in life. Though Im really motivated to always get better and Im really into this self development thing, I cant find a reason to work hard and grind. Also Im pretty socially insecure and Ive never had a girlfriend. Dont understand me wrong , Im not ugly and Ive had several dates, but Ive never gotten past that state, which is kind of weird considering im 17 now. Also Im addicted to Youtube and videogames and even though I can control, how much time I spend on my phone/PC quite well, I never achieve full control over it. And believe me, Ive tried many things. Also I go to the gym fairly regularly (I try 4 times/week) but I cant pull it of to go consistently over a long period of time. Same goes for piano, which I started playing recently. Also I tried to really get better nutrition and eat 3000 cals a day to really build muscle and stuff, but I dont do that either. I really want to do all of the stuff and Im sure I can, but Im lacking motivation. And thats the problem, I just dont know what to work for. I dont see any meaning in life. Also I have no Idea what I want to do for a living. I really want to do big stuff for humanity and be remembered and do good things for the environment, humanity, etc. but I have no idea what. And thats why I dont have motivation and I sometimes feel depressed. Does anybody feel the same and can maybe give me some advice, Or is it just because of my age?

Btw im sorry for my English, Im from Germany...",0.6609576239325392,2.55336072979215,3.489172350824429,87.98231537676568,82.57967667436489,6.891648316236104,20.69332402384661,7.97965635744439,0.9060323218217952,1568,46,353,31,43,556,191,433,0.055999999999999994,0.815,0.129,0.9675,0,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,1,2,12,20,17,0,1,16,0,34,6,0,8,7,76,56,42,0,8,18,0,3,0,2,0,5,0,1,4,19,22,1,2,14,2,2,4,16,5,1,2,3,5,48,12,42,52,17,39,0,1,2,0,12,15,0,6,19,232,67,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051869019215164375,0.0,0.04649444259642645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228297355600284,0.03959021595610649,0.0,0.0,0.06471180884385527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03915413203694397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029004212385496282,0.0,0.0,0.05360615597208752,0.0,0.08416095613362587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067296121482756,0.0,0.05264615810299908,0.0,0.03068504320586568,0.0,0.040980423218300005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041637414991797184,0.0,0.334579118886652,0.0,0.0,0.04868602701326747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05306406865157187,0.06285203550239353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044854013202340136,0.0,0.04811556613336192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043487087101840266,0.040471364632414485,0.0,0.0,0.03676004549767307,0.0,0.07457546552584057,0.04564289215000932,0.08112211261691249,0.11972306920867387,0.0,0.05245691180499777,0.0,0.0471114953584438,0.0,0.05064959568249538,0.042622166821113465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03189174571509578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054900716015072785,0.0,0.10742363488656607,0.6681267161125094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04954705346155705,0.026148620905691887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082108707434362,0.0,0.0,0.0840276931647725,0.042106637256406086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964769248719482,0.04780031732094461,0.10365672971626967,0.0,0.0,0.04794926061346658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995327431823625,0.03527982845855262,0.1100894549661928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04992700995841657,0.0,0.0322413126646549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0454203152774281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04497830244052897,0.0,0.0,0.04840577507346554,0.0,0.04552745524776608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05060698784141352,0.0,0.0,0.2438467724729961,0.04891997217159956,0.046979325266987705,0.0,0.05389865299980655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04815331092190366,0.07582990156513778,0.0,0.04963612173158776,0.05375164563569804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04850162748728736,0.0,0.0,0.04705765167056724,0.053261705237853035,0.033677236533996964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634025075465438,0.0,0.0,0.04484341066939915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482974071446973,0.0,0.14024077409246294,0.0,0.11097668635020227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691070941999627,0.0,0.0,0.049532263326175364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225522583353367,0.0,0.03816565601925128,0.0,0.042779965993645266,0.0,0.04293338066682314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692773410749993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05202105631231697,0.0,0.030639839607139643
mentalhealth,lovehappinessSanity,2020/03/02,"Agoraphobia/Anxiety/mental health page on insta! Pls follow! :) @morethanphobia Hello everybody! I have a family history of bad mental health from bipolar, schizophrenia, ADHD etc. Because of my childhood trauma I developed crippling anxiety, a panic disorder and agoraphobia. I made a page on INSTA for my day by day tips, motivation, the good the bad and etc. Something RAW. I am not afraid to show the truth and it’s true we don’t always have good days and we should have something to do to keep us away from those negative obsessive/depressive thoughts when we do. I will discuss about a lot of things and it’ll be something that will help me connect w you guys and you guys connecting w eachother. I find this helpful specially for those who have family who ignore mental health or undermine you because of it. It’s real but this page is also for motivating to always do better for ourselves. To find our worth even with whatever is going on. To PUSH. We shouldn’t be always comfortable where we are and there’s always going to be a time where we have to change and change is scary but that’s what this page is here for. To ground you. To tell you it’s okay. To make your feelings valid and to accept. But we will ALL rise and do the best we can. Also no comparing w eachother, we all live different lives the point is to move foward from where we are. Thank you everybody! I hope you support the idea. I will list healthy habits, discuss medications, obsessive thoughts, CBD oil, what is good for your gut. And I’m 100% not doctor so we can all educate eachother. Again thank you guys. You are worthy, amazing and strong! Keep fighting. 💛 be you, be real and be in the NOW. You matter! #morethan",1.9733164812942368,4.7900863850931685,3.0515831287014312,86.52187996533299,87.32298136645962,6.47360970677452,23.01632240358226,7.738981096181357,1.5551303481149792,1344,50,248,28,43,429,160,322,0.083,0.6990000000000001,0.21899999999999997,0.9945,1,0,3,0,2,0,48.0,13,13,0,5,14,25,1,3,12,1,35,7,1,4,5,57,50,21,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,7,6,0,0,3,17,25,0,3,9,1,1,6,6,8,0,0,3,2,37,17,34,34,11,24,0,0,0,0,38,10,0,3,8,174,54,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163984407722044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857367569822208,0.3091790822098069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106321532697983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727642999188585,0.0,0.15512425825470358,0.11325393849212995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748591773121464,0.08215668488694096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965378513561644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797257213715924,0.0,0.08000897022922883,0.0,0.0,0.09705385703320699,0.10646391215360687,0.09508035599974517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20720144671856267,0.06135523064964145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751433062489656,0.0,0.04696970645983412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16980581380298168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558694751595987,0.23374379100582784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759372842131824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962240984071443,0.0,0.0,0.12452900839432005,0.0,0.0,0.0922641304642628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048653690052271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16513588742100008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16405319108195254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897466743730758,0.0,0.08789800413917538,0.06200708204773405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358035209567347,0.18722944585029236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987310089568178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899041840655004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781431176919934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114661076181896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145416891585533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541435705573668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811929472792876,0.1710475689356599,0.0,0.0,0.06171426342811561,0.0,0.0,0.14749400519180242,0.0541669027369072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173935176403814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Billywilliamsbob,2020/03/02,"I feel like having a job would help me I've never been a joyful person, always isolated myself and felt like shit most of the time. In past times, during school, I got through those feelings because I had an objective ahead of me. Now I'm unemployed, aplied for a job pretty much in every place in the city and not even mcdonalds or other similar places give me a call, I'm just stranded. Can't help but feel worthless, I don't know what I have to do anymore.",8.528548387096771,5.813786774193549,8.449543010752688,75.89431451612907,62.97849462365592,11.450537634408605,35.077956989247305,9.516144504307137,3.0200344086021502,362,11,73,5,4,118,69,93,0.111,0.785,0.10400000000000001,-0.3763,4,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,1,0,7,0,8,1,1,0,1,14,17,4,0,1,4,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,4,9,3,9,12,2,11,0,1,0,0,5,5,1,2,8,47,12,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538613479214136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852000674828958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138375314817517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19068670822168995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334278337055893,0.0,0.15734004334536233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28327043680771746,0.1334100943308805,0.17930371812379872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791420536777999,0.0,0.0,0.14935639674921525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503414027312582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3706296082880541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262972895084037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824675673475321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13727847461625833,0.0,0.14402864003517082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17826847016507388,0.0,0.1630578330375225,0.3902158866187558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18998598791738708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889951009586428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19169023848622332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21778409043179184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265772226174402,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ApocaNips,2020/03/02,Adjusting the meds So I have tried 6 different kind of antidepressants... and finally found 2 that work (zoloft and wellbutrin). Going outside isn't hard anymore and I have energy which is nice because I have two kids that I don't want to ruin with my shitty moods. I also don't think about dying 24/7. Anyway. The meds worked great for a few months but now I'm noticing I'm getting mood swings... like hyper go-go-go and then hyper desire to self harm and just basically extreme moods that I am not used to. For the most part I am able to keep them under control and I really don't want to adjust the meds AGAIN... especially since I finally have -some- good days after years of bad days. Also going to the doctor is not cheap. Has anyone else had this happen? It's been 4-5 months maybe I should just give it more time or maybe this is just how normal people feel?,2.516770231213872,4.6083408034682085,3.7008634393063597,87.78748013005783,77.38150289017341,6.405924855491331,19.48302023121387,7.413659706084162,0.4745263005780349,681,15,137,9,16,221,113,173,0.083,0.799,0.11800000000000001,0.6059,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,3,11,11,0,0,6,0,17,2,0,3,0,30,31,13,1,5,7,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,8,7,0,2,5,0,1,2,6,3,0,1,3,2,12,5,14,27,5,15,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,3,13,84,20,3,0.12332728683944393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972495734571636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230752951419314,0.08623330646038549,0.12636337951149704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297313312672296,0.07517916937483361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832203892248904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590717947991189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799425287182264,0.12885076587225947,0.0,0.12623070390476598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302412314255266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0623579817963764,0.0,0.0,0.27019802908490864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352220044453752,0.0,0.0,0.06443341722755884,0.11830677124053544,0.3504486959464824,0.10344107697743314,0.0,0.13596876912405625,0.0,0.0,0.10905791245750078,0.0,0.11047702506030573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961895908944064,0.0,0.12842639112906906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06025148284787321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477976718884517,0.0,0.41096644059589216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968773274885917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083455624031213,0.0,0.14040893347446035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355143349074916,0.0,0.08549961234089654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900661792500961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865725685538368,0.0,0.0,0.10201760610260546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902314566913056,0.0,0.0,0.07191313272784883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08373113234826103,0.0,0.12047283908647945,0.0,0.0,0.106515178769799,0.0,0.0,0.145483258155452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795674672800247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794187292806735
mentalhealth,zootedwhisperer,2020/03/02,"Found a great YouTube chanel on topics ranginf from full lown mental health disorders as well as common issues many of us have. Think this could be my first post on this sub - a long time lurker. But I fond a great youtube channel,. thought id share it here. 

 I Apologise  if she is already super popular in this community and I look dumb af.",2.4097402597402606,4.936909757575759,3.1053246753246766,89.59227272727274,80.2121212121212,6.195670995670996,24.58008658008658,7.447530270364453,1.2134268398268406,268,10,53,4,7,84,55,66,0.042,0.621,0.337,0.9694,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,0,2,2,8,1,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,7,8,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,1,6,7,7,4,1,9,0,0,1,0,3,4,1,1,4,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451610709310559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17737811999472178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25461667023244383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18897071376428626,0.0,0.24358894698002104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4898683380555557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361476048654345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318791999678887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966062021586506,0.1865599592943568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252371957360881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22388684159514052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21276959340416415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235231107203625,0.0,0.17637165365011062,0.12954433227831286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672332915875031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19975013894530846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bluenette23,2020/03/02,"Which antidepressant should I take? Moving on to pill #5 and feeling hopeless So, I’m 20 and on Wednesday I’ll be visiting the psychiatrist to try yet another antidepressant. I’m just so sick of them all making things worse. Here’s a summary of what I’ve taken (all at the lower starter dose):

Zoloft - age 14 - triggered daily panic attacks

Lexapro - age 14-17 - had to sleep 9-10 hours per day in order to function (even after taking it for years) and libido was at zero. I will go back to this if I have to because I was somewhat stable at least on it. 

Prozac - age 19 - triggered cyclothymia. Crazy sex drive, made a fuck ton of reckless decisions, racing thoughts interspaces with horrible depression. Awful. 

Celexa - age 19 to now - thought this one was working but when I upped the dose it did me dirty. Started getting panic episodes (not sure what to call them) where I was terrified and convinced that my brain wasn’t working because everything was moving too fast. Progressed into blackout panics where I remember nothing but I apparently threaten to kill myself in order to make it stop. Also have delusional thoughts where I’m convinced there’s a black spot on my soul. 

Is there any medication that won’t make my head spin? My therapist said that the next drug will probably be Wellbutrin, but I’m scared that that drug will trigger some sort of head spinning as well. Have any of you guys managed to find something that helps depression yet doesn’t make you manic?",6.854137039431159,7.64227773626374,6.4494979530273655,77.42540400775698,64.67765567765568,9.20741219564749,35.106442577030805,9.168548406835145,3.1717202758026284,1174,52,205,19,17,365,172,273,0.201,0.727,0.071,-0.9903,2,0,3,0,0,2,37.0,0,2,2,3,18,14,3,4,7,1,20,15,4,8,3,35,41,13,1,2,6,0,1,0,0,5,9,1,0,1,16,6,0,1,7,0,0,5,4,10,1,2,14,3,18,4,31,20,6,40,1,3,1,2,9,14,1,4,19,127,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902409298454372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514054354041644,0.11673073130124426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664474610572715,0.0,0.0855996790072679,0.0,0.13572160887596355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427207040670855,0.113672118914744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179342395125833,0.0,0.19176279975066116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581961516192939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352707312076241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004895662691923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05628770366871976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10174621100454914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291531403197024,0.058161104493580126,0.0,0.06326680813031425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022619510602297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284967966247321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746167311972994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962965944722952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316120216031574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533548499581744,0.297232963348366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121451149046489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23663515035280905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839211656780158,0.0,0.0,0.10681637714571587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543460875545285,0.0,0.0,0.3918368350402929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200238497376608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610602563783174,0.0,0.10589263098464344,0.0,0.11145265439896362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111402307575798,0.0,0.0,0.0857010467251554,0.0,0.0,0.0787942224415662,0.0,0.0,0.09307010328296757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491958482864806,0.0,0.16740044761626416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12925332022553582,0.07395733194427437,0.0,0.0,0.26513149057834584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558027103659641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10009176831190134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16208735587058246,0.0,0.1134465390513874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168766163879592
mentalhealth,AtomicSugarglider,2020/03/02,"Rant about parents Yes mom, i know i was absent 2 days last week, but i 
still need a day off tomorrow. 

I feel horrible and i know you dont understand how exactly depression works, but i am thankful that you are willing to listen.

Please understand that i do not find joy in this life, i am not staying away from school because i hate it, im lazy or anything like that, i love my friends and they do their best to help me cope, but my mind needs a break from stress.

I can no longer stay awake during classes, even if it's only my mind that wanders off, i gain no benefits from being there.

I feel like giving up, but i know i wont, at least for now.

I promise to do my best, but it is hard, when even your teachers think that you need more help, than you are getting.

I never wished to feel this way.

I am sorry that i lied to you, just now, when i said i would go to school tomorrow. I cant. I wont let you worry all night about me. 

I am sorry that i am a burden to you.

I dont know how to move forward.",1.9990380184331789,2.8003445576036867,3.6201123271889415,93.26445420506913,75.7741935483871,6.899654377880187,23.239919354838708,7.1686216300943375,0.5583182027649771,767,21,186,8,16,256,120,217,0.175,0.583,0.242,0.9690000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,8,2,4,13,14,1,1,3,1,22,2,0,2,3,35,44,13,0,6,10,2,4,2,1,4,1,2,0,0,12,2,0,0,11,0,0,3,10,4,0,0,2,6,42,10,21,36,5,26,0,1,0,1,19,7,0,2,16,130,54,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313129104836047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063292508795787,0.0,0.0,0.06898888073303201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375350276044057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14597374739098126,0.0,0.09747527332306492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652745587646271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949868396603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17167018755369085,0.08085042750466746,0.0,0.0,0.10343757746706002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743676128395599,0.0,0.05912793893971624,0.10856533530357944,0.06431851665493872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138029415601653,0.11173437334766084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171422773108215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224567648686535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487864955640895,0.09225065921971226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572650725689902,0.07993705487902028,0.11058069406049348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10214256302541276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285438440118025,0.13254621647253986,0.0,0.1202844138095408,0.0,0.2517478336035778,0.08728557743822839,0.0,0.0,0.10620468649813472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607275500972289,0.0,0.0,0.125664622945045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422937521026473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765292498386134,0.0,0.0,0.22907314151050875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533746051404304,0.0,0.2412535669818697,0.09037967215183353,0.0,0.1296386697067263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419399528253337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725163421869574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23563304265110305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983103041221202,0.0907801203568176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13014274291202504,0.0,0.0,0.08239089821509264,0.11493212589531045,0.0,0.0803944679782362,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,glitchb4by,2020/03/02,"Im 20 and i feel like im gonna have to kill myself soon Idk where to start this off...

I’ve been mentally I’ll since I was 13 with anxiety and depression

I won against it, and felt quite “ok” for a while.

When I turned 20 I tried to kill myself 2 times in half a year and was put into a psych ward for a couple months.

Ever since I came out from there I feel so fucking weird all the time.

I can’t do anything but be in my bed and play video games.

I try so hard to battle all this, with yoga, good diet etc

I suffer from extreme derealization 24/7 for the past 7 months or so..
Recently I started getting so sick, I always feel like someone punched me in the stomach and it’s hard to breath.
I have loss of feeling in the left side of my face, forehead and inner eye.
I freeze all the time, my hands and feet’s are always cold.
I feel like I have a fever everyday.
My body hurts.
I can’t think straight anymore, I can’t focus on anything either.
I feel like I have to pass out and have a nerve break down anytime.
I’m shaking so hard.

I feel so weird and so not myself, everything seems off I can’t describe it bc nothing is off, I feel like I’m going fucking crazy.
I feel like my body is dying and I can’t move soon.

Has anybody ever experienced this and found out how to deal with all this?

I’m 20 and diagnosed borderline, depression, anxiety and pcos.

I am well aware that my mental illnesses can cause a lot of symptoms, but this is outta my hand I can’t function anymore.

I’m crying so much, plz help me.",0.9293819716611368,2.7914073426791286,2.821595819515625,93.27624057883631,81.49221183800624,5.7618731785750175,21.569791980705453,6.828538100315305,0.3746467892674108,1171,36,267,13,31,391,166,321,0.18899999999999997,0.6729999999999999,0.138,-0.9611,0,0,0,0,0,2,37.0,0,0,0,3,17,24,5,1,12,1,23,18,10,2,6,49,50,28,3,0,5,0,16,6,0,1,5,0,1,0,9,22,1,0,13,4,0,6,7,13,1,1,7,19,39,11,32,41,8,42,0,5,1,2,3,18,2,3,23,160,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266722013674712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13116529504152485,0.0,0.17004077508116902,0.0,0.0,0.141095749029789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190451758145616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805143232114197,0.0,0.08806756291115843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09485779309415547,0.09416956409295077,0.0,0.08838310037215814,0.14767696814446102,0.08701339202067464,0.08897343463116159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561078388734544,0.0,0.1550940434391931,0.0,0.0,0.07704792900338939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3901255973096293,0.3674699931592069,0.08231353157450118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399770617250768,0.0,0.15851063471786914,0.044789998825178735,0.0,0.04872191280587482,0.0719056339962801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303897279815812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746251436876721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177494350669524,0.0,0.18520461915008726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18969344368888488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314508937629568,0.0,0.0,0.251297909881825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288394922434616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17278985613314282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685655124848395,0.09111663369003102,0.06302086857464291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225953493360086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183827698173751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618158260983329,0.0,0.09118361823074374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464729956477271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780446964818943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14183225581054176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263812188220828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135921975065582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910552393968699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05493184676488691,0.0,0.0,0.14996825881606146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640907718007695,0.09324881464641073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708089837934515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05520683124124479
mentalhealth,bloomingrose1111,2020/03/02,"Despite this Where did she go? The girl I once knew. So carefree and kind she was. She helped me through. Times are tough and the world is sad. Just seeing her face helped me feel less mad. Now I know she needs someone but where did she go? The last time I saw her true concern would show. I should have reached out but what would I say? What on Earth could have you feeling this way? For that is a silly question, take a look around. There is greed, hate, violence and war abound. If I see her again I’ll make sure she knows how appreciated she is. Her love always shows.",0.5061159420289876,2.9390650608695665,0.7391304347826093,103.41855072463768,89.69565217391305,3.7623188405797103,16.36231884057971,5.2151,-1.086002898550725,442,10,104,2,15,130,82,115,0.17600000000000002,0.636,0.18899999999999997,-0.474,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,9,11,4,0,5,0,14,2,1,2,2,24,30,8,1,6,4,0,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,5,5,0,0,6,2,1,2,0,6,0,0,5,7,20,5,5,21,1,14,0,1,4,1,18,6,0,2,5,64,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16837219495850514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18013524057463698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156076291021254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046294339623498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300014087003037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997796638258941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712631440587505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107173690160692,0.2224135731873983,0.16494302634415825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16992382912273166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18262962678493747,0.0,0.13507082604332726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500406605993726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154971507692324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266793668690889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16091759201507586,0.0,0.0,0.3224950069523508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17145129774377174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19071336949016554,0.0,0.1521427265996124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359849247945698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061676026092014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874886090098589,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Survivorman98,2020/03/02,"How can I help my friend who won’t seek help? Okay so to preface, I am a nursing student (22M) and I have a friend that I’ve cared for like a sister for the last 4 years (24F) she has always been in a rough spot mentally and even more so in the last year due to losing her mom. We’ve always been able to talk and she had been going to therapy for a while. Things were getting better until I walked into class today and she is completely silent, refusing to talk unless texting or writing down words. Basically telling me that she has DID and Anna is no longer here and I’m talking to (insert name here). Now I support her in most all her decisions (coming out, financially etc.) but this can’t be healthy? She also has refused to take any meds or see any counseling service. I just need advice because I don’t know what to do and I just want my friend back. She has a history of suicidal ideation and went so far as to say one of “us” killed themselves last night.",3.1159560067681897,4.39127088324873,4.2670253807106615,87.86202707275804,73.67005076142131,7.28379018612521,25.82368866328257,7.793537801064563,1.2932283587140434,752,25,160,10,15,246,130,197,0.10099999999999999,0.769,0.13,-0.23800000000000002,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,0,0,2,12,10,1,0,8,1,20,0,0,1,1,29,32,20,2,2,6,2,1,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,6,11,0,2,2,0,0,4,4,2,0,1,7,3,21,8,23,23,4,23,0,1,1,0,27,7,0,3,13,108,27,3,0.13652894142244856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13341450143142902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091821451289842,0.22720603273787904,0.0,0.0,0.18568872388831387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498232852525237,0.0,0.0832267754753055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074875378141503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920035495714594,0.0,0.0,0.1176075939367882,0.14314799750962556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15226585948181068,0.09017607817441398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31644576440490396,0.0,0.0713307368689798,0.0,0.07759254372106728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830249430577942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510490452383762,0.0,0.07503273566549774,0.33386792860310044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670114443579887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274096270100904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516528756736945,0.0,0.13758906100409904,0.0,0.0,0.1599010460997298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012344801128104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281231628008324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251554410462727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857329408958664,0.0,0.0,0.10879588985205696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14934050237228047,0.15493142478503988,0.0,0.0,0.1026527727132762,0.3292103744729393,0.11933231255990555,0.0,0.15613274313179898,0.0,0.09070376208263267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294134725583785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16422750616603102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08052830699385809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265636965235424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17584032399776206
mentalhealth,Kotori425,2020/03/02,"Doing Better Doesn't Seem To Make Me Feel Better I live with some anxiety and depression, and I've been doing my best to manage it without therapy or medication *(sighs in self-employed American.)* I have a bunch of friends who go through the same, and I see them posting on Facebook about their little victories and how they're so fulfilled by the journey they're on, and...I don't get it.

Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy for them and I love to see them healing; but when I'm in similar situations where I need to conquer some mental hang-up, or 'rise above' that darkness, I don't get those warm fuzzies or any kind of sense of accomplishment. I don't feel 'stronger' after, I feel like a cat that's just returned from the vet; like I want to run and hide under the bed, and like I'm now resentful and suspicious of these caretakers (even when that caretaker is myself) for putting me in that terrifying situation.

I think what makes it worse is people's reactions after the fact. They'll be standing around like, ""Look at you, don't you feel better now, aren't you so proud??"" and inside I'm like, ""No, I felt like I wanted to shrivel up and die the whole time, the only thing that got me through was thinking about how afterward I'd be able to retreat to my couch in a haze of weed smoke for the rest of the day.""

But if I were to ever voice those thoughts, people would tell me what an immature brat I'm being (I know that, because I've tried it before.) So when is it supposed to start feeling good? Is there some kind of tipping point if I just keep at it long enough, or is 'immature brat' another thing I need to put in the Self Improvement column?",4.450939031028849,5.083167817365271,5.204561785519871,84.78892759934678,69.92814371257485,8.587697332607512,28.95427327163854,8.710501217029153,1.9935197604790416,1297,46,273,21,22,421,181,334,0.10099999999999999,0.752,0.147,0.9029,1,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,3,5,7,19,22,1,0,14,0,23,3,0,4,2,50,56,26,1,7,11,0,7,6,1,2,2,1,2,1,20,12,0,1,11,0,0,6,9,3,1,0,6,12,32,18,43,45,9,37,0,1,4,1,13,15,0,10,20,175,52,2,0.1047940346619676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126353711070729,0.10988568250327713,0.08016714968251883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932889084746947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388147086687154,0.0,0.08917200505197477,0.0,0.10997487409958068,0.27804542298483875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675834829627856,0.0,0.09025894849814947,0.0,0.10875966313476476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828025101703637,0.0,0.06921547155815015,0.09479220392345887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26493506316761833,0.07486487930134783,0.1006187071746484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096361122699364,0.0,0.16425167368980612,0.0,0.05955686487787265,0.08789626435515982,0.0838133626364285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155519853482099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314575300260004,0.0,0.21825372191982212,0.057592060849448325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071824319081132,0.1050311531120059,0.09253505252223364,0.09273942299988466,0.08800059606400044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458070771470428,0.0,0.13990166375175705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556896503032896,0.1056077391192633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15540689772291447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970058556048312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14530197767021766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906423518098316,0.0,0.10036371745942932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21069389828373766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16701455579236546,0.09540055336756607,0.2186460657643304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23558577131597175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417375710567697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915946052786089,0.0,0.11984111152664048,0.0,0.1392410003128522,0.13429557202745515,0.0,0.08319475791434018,0.0611062443426964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07114827067437843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646605351526933,0.12362047352688812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699879728935758,0.0,0.10101770983028914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679407412539277,0.07444267553612216,0.11457582605969802,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thhhrroowwaawwaayy,2020/03/02,"Should I speak to someone? Hi everyone. 25M here. I'm 1st year college in a pretty big city, and while i enjoy living here, I have become aware of just how incapable I am in social activities and making new friends. This partially stems from me being a mature student in an environment where the majority of people are around 6 years younger than me. Although this doesn't sound like a big deal, i initially, and to some degree still do, had an incredibly hard time fitting in.

Recently I have become increasingly self concious and find myself distancing what few friends I have, for no apparent reason. I get on well with my flatmates, however I am increasingly avoiding them as I simply feel embarassed with my presence as I can never think of anything to say, im reasonably convinced that they too feel awkward around me as i've made things weird. As I type this, Im sitting in my room hungry and wanting to eat, but 2 af my flatmates are in the kitchen/communal area and going in there fills me with dread.

Regardess of the crowd, any social event I try and throw myself into I find myself locking up and overthinking everything, and instantly become the quiet guy in the corner. My brain just goes blank. Although I know i have interesting anecdotes and input to conversations that i'm 'part of' I simply don't have the confidence to speak. And of course any girls that I'm attracted to or I know are attracted to me the problem is massively amplified.

I enjoy peoples company and when i can, love speaking to people and meeting new friends. I have taken numerous solo backpacking trips abroad and met countless friends in countless ways and never envisaged a problem like this affecting me but here we are.I've 'kind of' had periods of being depressed before but never seen anyone about it. Is now the time? 

Help.",6.554983862291558,7.619381642011834,6.914835933297473,72.85096826250674,65.42011834319527,9.932436793975256,34.89026358257128,10.018931242160765,3.70743905325444,1457,66,243,32,22,473,192,338,0.092,0.774,0.133,0.9548,2,1,0,0,0,0,32.0,1,0,2,0,16,22,0,3,14,0,23,3,1,6,3,50,40,28,0,4,6,0,3,2,4,1,0,6,1,3,10,22,1,1,9,0,0,6,6,7,1,0,6,10,38,15,42,31,6,45,0,1,1,1,24,21,0,2,18,169,48,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440590512763606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406202853078021,0.0,0.08716349018154669,0.1885832810767477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35094238479072104,0.09013048586293236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824223162893867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091993140045175,0.09122911250985093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838304456718273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121151149143257,0.09519445411183244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071131055155984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19361871110046816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273354507551201,0.0,0.05533905379396948,0.0,0.06019702220205711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048778800469665,0.0,0.0,0.09488390179925274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099623257865229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288244842792181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029983001145532,0.1164221982713708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034947452409458,0.0,0.09352968163404758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559732490726933,0.10022447340629226,0.07070271056274299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450770998571352,0.2045972256965568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470150552631662,0.0,0.2202956718865151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775915799551168,0.0,0.20270309630335492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178076893665994,0.1045836478454186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423217852422049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049811052174688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21594508223491055,0.08974603794972066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458819347975133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036882821533103,0.06786953567445274,0.0,0.0,0.12352611088325688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191302024050583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06247461484739514,0.08407470839491715,0.0,0.0,0.09523518851945524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641857039462196
mentalhealth,Sarcastic_Troll,2020/03/02,"META: Please remember, if asking for help in seeking services, in any capacity thereof, you need to include your country I want to help anyone who wants to seek help. Or navigate this complex system in any capacity. Because seeking effective and appropriate treatment is not easy, and I have a ton of resources, a ton of friends with resources, to help with what to say, how to say it, how to talk to insurance companies, where to start, what to do if you don't feel you're getting the right treatment, how to get help with paying for treatment, medication. I even have connections on how to navigate getting disability for mental health diagnosis, subsidies, social workers, etc etc etc.

But none of that may really apply to someone in the UK. And it's not that I don't want to help, but writing out for an hour on my little cell phone on how to talk to an insurance company, to get a response of, ""Oh, I'm in Britain,"" is... Frankly demoralizing. I typed an hour on a cell phone for that information. 

If you're in the USA, even including a state can help. I'm better at NJ because that's where I live and that's where my cousin got all the stuff she needed. And my wife. Yes, some sources are nation wide, some are state specific. 

So please, keep in mind, anytime you are asking about anything related to *seeking help* you need to include a country. The system can be very hard to navigate in any country, with the stigma, payment, confusion, doctors, therapists, treatment options. But you will get much better information from someone in your own country than placing a general call-out, and sifting thru irrelevant information. It wastes your time, and, wastes mine as well, unfortunately.",6.2080738018680135,7.46012222508039,6.6525953146531975,73.7441693461951,66.2990353697749,9.782330424131068,36.352932169652426,9.957137785484203,3.822535017608328,1336,67,232,30,21,434,156,311,0.03,0.843,0.126,0.976,0,0,0,0,0,0,59.0,0,8,0,4,13,5,0,1,16,1,15,3,0,6,1,49,34,21,0,9,9,2,2,0,1,2,3,2,0,0,13,12,0,1,7,0,1,0,5,1,1,0,1,4,19,4,53,30,11,31,0,0,0,0,36,23,0,9,4,155,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963618228669399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730089639712325,0.0,0.07920632392457297,0.0,0.17996327517398258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734736140824632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702522724046584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09828297299747077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851691735296382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220357284186318,0.12714567848481678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04866736815130196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743632388127889,0.0,0.2514357221902801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769806707850702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622193817027839,0.0,0.0,0.10231025015237663,0.0,0.0,0.5161198188219929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895755786386845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085552259465176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646872963401923,0.08499134493855924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696269767117227,0.09699831079157878,0.0,0.09718601307892308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075551694016295,0.21410656108439627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056174812968148,0.2113092607884505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06166081791263375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903355397005614,0.08219777832344426,0.0,0.15308522417277715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811571391755718,0.16310622114802648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812691195093658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018430043438833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472572206878593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117547618786586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05612469814703069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941710713382312,0.17031389760870316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654115588050093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ifeellikeaprincess,2020/03/02,"Can not just be happy Immediately i get a good news, i get another bad news after. I dont know how to truely be happy and just relax, cos in my mind if there is a good news now soon next a bad one will follow which is worst than a good news. Its like my heart is on pause. I dont know how to carry on.. its too much ups and downs",-0.3728571428571428,1.0372198666666677,2.433904761904764,96.696,83.66666666666666,5.352380952380952,13.38095238095238,6.1826913282559595,-1.0993047619047625,250,2,66,2,7,88,48,75,0.198,0.638,0.16399999999999998,-0.6119,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,8,10,0,0,4,0,9,1,1,3,0,16,14,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,3,0,1,0,0,6,7,9,11,2,10,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,5,46,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005426340870509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31937205438257393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44828789721605533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19984079541923408,0.0,0.0,0.4812350793654076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40717904008303785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22663254793744986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102123465430656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343524506067473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931083020754924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14059098944302545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20339688312562668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959616523008433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,acatfromyouralley,2020/03/02,IOPs? I can’t maintain this anymore. I feel on edge and close to another suicide attempt at all times. It’s beyond weekly therapy for me and I’m spiraling into the crazy ass downward trajectory that landed me in the psych-Ward. I have no money but am willing to foot a huge insurance bill if it means nipping this in the bud. What are my options for IOP’s? How do I do it?,1.3049675324675327,3.499171363636368,3.6416720779220815,86.09679383116888,82.11688311688313,6.447402597402598,26.508116883116887,7.645422480735847,1.6749493506493511,293,13,59,5,8,101,61,77,0.12,0.84,0.04,-0.598,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,0,7,2,2,1,1,11,10,5,1,1,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,2,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,10,9,1,12,0,0,0,1,1,10,1,2,2,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3959611153161543,0.0,0.0,0.3744915364324614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909329417780654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4113322554485823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4130483344955279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4318344219175326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22018971090245468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3028991058090337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nosymotherfuck,2020/03/02,"I think my coworker has an eating disorder—should I do anything? So for a few weeks when I went to the bathroom I’d occasionally hear a weird squelching but ignored it respectfully thinking it’d just be someone having stomach problems, but as time has gone on it’s been a regular thing and I noticed whoever’s feet facing towards the toilet and I’m 99.999% sure this girl is purging or something. 

I don’t know her personally or work with her even. She’s on the same floor but with a different team entirely and we don’t cross paths. All I know is that we were hired around the same time this past year. 

I don’t plan on doing anything at the moment or asking—I assume it’s not something she really wants to talk about especially from some stranger. I just am kind of worried as it’s a little disturbing to hear someone vomit regularly for whatever reason. 

(I also don’t know if it’s a pregnancy thing either but I’m not really thinking it’s that?) 

Does anyone have any advice or reassurance of what to do or not do? I’m worried and I don’t know if she’s alright or not or already being supported. 

I’m in the USA",2.4991824694479514,4.605100911504426,4.5319216182048025,81.73910029498529,77.49557522123894,7.490602612726509,27.133586177833966,8.418075326091056,2.1002754319426886,890,37,172,18,21,305,126,226,0.08800000000000001,0.841,0.071,-0.5485,1,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,2,0,0,3,8,10,0,1,13,1,21,5,3,1,2,46,38,22,0,4,20,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,14,9,1,1,9,1,0,3,9,4,0,0,4,2,18,6,21,31,6,19,0,0,0,0,14,9,0,11,7,119,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683634385438606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545273194090707,0.1119824711207118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522565313082887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791269589174266,0.0,0.23046660957880116,0.12465697886374183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630223949564505,0.0,0.0,0.12254177740079493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14328632759656815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248893267315596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3156494700804022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582038768130892,0.3078287624718617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034751234193385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15942583867040214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367511324363032,0.0,0.12226937425540428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399043354866058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17941445763488795,0.14397484429535876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372950537699031,0.21560489229765495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589051376595066,0.13197724328526467,0.0,0.0,0.112551343166054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18606030145238325,0.26917798520916897,0.0,0.0,0.16330601212975712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259371348388732,0.0,0.1123241518520728,0.0,0.0,0.12980982810087402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194399088660963,0.2844158723518785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017515629810006
mentalhealth,aymamg00,2020/03/02,"Does gabapentin help your adhd symptoms? Has anyone noticed their ADHD symptoms lessened after they take their (unrelated) gabapentin dose?

I noticed for me when I take it at night(when prescribed, always) I’m much more able to concentrate and think clearly- even to the point of being able to accomplish stressy things I couldn’t do during the day. 

I’m thinking the ptsd/adhd part of my brain gets hushed from the gabapentin and was wondering if I’m the only one.",8.10892857142857,8.827379654761911,6.414380952380951,78.99728571428572,61.97619047619048,8.624761904761906,37.03809523809524,8.238735603445708,3.0277695238095235,377,17,63,4,5,110,60,84,0.0,0.895,0.105,0.8205,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,3,1,2,0,0,0,5,0,5,4,1,0,1,8,14,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,9,0,9,11,3,5,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,3,39,11,1,0.3061199273902753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5518449969083529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735815117240046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702308543705732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708655394529593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871101424849647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394380568250858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010946624777409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996751371367702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259286729928636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251668462106693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363640736159095,0.0,0.0,0.34851956628304603,0.0,0.0,0.10371739262282048,0.11640899953626915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16574902509725742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469113904429914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789189067756684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181758157852714,0.23016408830246515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168623873251133,0.19614928889077365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598700152645715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OtakuDesuKara,2020/03/02,"Is self hatred curable? How can i know if i have depression or my brain fakes it? I currently cant go to a therapist

I will appreciate any advice",1.625,3.779896833333332,4.830000000000002,78.245,80.66666666666666,9.333333333333334,26.66666666666667,9.725611199111238,3.0316666666666667,115,5,23,4,3,42,27,30,0.32799999999999996,0.5920000000000001,0.08,-0.8541,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,5,1,1,1,0,4,7,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,6,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.384267458426572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674152105710551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4389834722538224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3386951686254169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22348612218793806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161132284993226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.410232820931058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.456579431945136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KOAL101,2020/03/02,"Not PTSD, then what? Hey, I wanted to ask for advice, as I’m not sure how should I bring this up, or what to call this when talking to a doctor/therapist. This needs a bit of a back story/context, I’ll try and make it to the point and short.

Basically I get really uncomfortable/anxious/uneasy when hearing sudden noises, like someone slamming doors, screaming, dropping something, anything really. It mainly happens when the noise is unexpected. I don’t feel particularly comfortable in loud places, but I can handle it, on a busy street for example where I expect it to be loud. Tho I am still very jumpy and somewhat on the edge at all times.

Where it comes from is that I went through a stupid experience few years ago. For about 1.5 year I was constantly exposed to deafening noise at my place. The store on the ground floor of the flat that I lived in was going through renovation, so there was some demolition taking place, I think it was a handheld pneumatic hammer. Which is understandable. What isn’t is how the hell did it last for so long and more importantly why for this whole period the noise was focused on the wall that my head was next to when sleeping. (I swear they had to tear down and rebuild the same wall, over and over again, there is no other logical explanation for how could that last so long)

So I had a horrible wake up at about 7:30 AM, which lasted till about 9:30. Then I would over sleep more and more after it finally calmed down, which led to problems with falling asleep at night, which only got worse and worse with time. So all that time I slept like 4-5AM – 7AM and then 9AM till 12-1 PM, and under a constant fear of the noise coming back. It was loud in the whole flat, it was just the worst on the wall behind my head.

Now I know you might think, why did you not just move. Well I already moved once while there, plus it was a difficult time overall, 3 years of non stop stress (outside of the noise), even if there was no renovation. I just wanted for it all to be over and go back home(the town I was in was around 400km away).

So I talked about this with the therapist and I was told that „This isn’t PTSD, because there is no one specific event that caused it and that keeps coming back to you.” (as if how it would be with assault/rape victims)

But then what is it? I get regular panic attacks and the situation that I’m in now isn’t all that better when it comes to noise. Even when its not a full on attack I get into this state of distress where I can’t focus on anything and my thoughts are completely scattered.

The mental health care here is pretty lacking overall, I have one appointment every few months and am on antidepressants, tho I can’t say I see much of a difference. Either way I don’t know exactly what I am diagnosed with. Depression, insomnia, heavy anxiety are the ones I can guess at. They also suspected psychosis, but I think that one’s off the hook? I don’t know, they don’t really tell me much.

Anyway I would be grateful if someone could maybe share similar experience or if you know what this might be called, so that I can get some help regarding it. Thank you.",5.299789793539794,5.835834137987014,5.58818181818182,83.13047785547789,68.00974025974024,9.045221445221447,28.294871794871803,9.057496981413335,2.025707758907759,2463,77,505,42,39,784,288,616,0.146,0.782,0.07200000000000001,-0.9936,0,0,2,0,0,0,80.0,0,5,3,1,49,24,5,4,31,0,57,10,7,7,6,91,97,55,0,16,17,0,1,2,0,6,3,6,1,0,48,28,0,2,12,0,1,12,16,14,1,4,22,8,47,10,76,62,23,107,1,1,1,0,20,47,1,12,47,366,95,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06743600170882814,0.061173408364496536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615450897182609,0.055187458983054834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05279263991593666,0.07796192113549197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135790846174797,0.061433739040983565,0.06451525284297162,0.1570182070227364,0.0648373862695287,0.21225843997069144,0.0,0.042067997953412886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061033943679109935,0.07534130174189976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14093432889484256,0.0,0.07036053258111727,0.0708925197868992,0.0,0.23778482310691534,0.07235591709373475,0.1491510926599907,0.0,0.11019811244292074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05943841319199266,0.07004393458433393,0.0,0.07210100617079201,0.0,0.07063489843905073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911612170584126,0.0,0.05814409830648541,0.0,0.0,0.13501050123176964,0.0,0.07765569893592615,0.034893647700596546,0.0,0.0,0.07559733786022088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14421999533119176,0.0,0.07844021234311738,0.0,0.055193788120592766,0.0,0.07602255273873615,0.0,0.0610255217797261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416488185246233,0.07335465139348057,0.07777954892738245,0.0,0.046256104997503725,0.0,0.06922289118408112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133946657002483,0.0,0.0,0.1517048787431011,0.1687576534952122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742982872015889,0.0,0.06093730071176301,0.12214377045545012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04606486688959514,0.0,0.06933005539000703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954608422201634,0.14641790478644726,0.0,0.0,0.05508331016913292,0.14669391415548605,0.10146092442508987,0.051170213887045866,0.0,0.0,0.07339316647839346,0.06476142947637632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349364667457818,0.18705248150372628,0.05248539247368792,0.0,0.08096864019942186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21630301851237602,0.0,0.06523697695588307,0.0,0.0,0.07020821733267246,0.0,0.06603347364622293,0.16133854049932508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262916851092446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487970773193362,0.0,0.0,0.054992221499607086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757039413061695,0.13812014419567126,0.0,0.11694429418950547,0.05312744946214203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05511166180281298,0.057695645473964115,0.07905098957917314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504132859017675,0.0,0.05188710733717647,0.1109356236257497,0.06031798603125814,0.06353535140344473,0.0,0.16025240065313245,0.0,0.13265691379375888,0.0,0.05478641706558034,0.16096168901974384,0.0,0.0,0.0659422356998627,0.0,0.046853418753555975,0.0,0.0,0.0718420870919919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569406701655393,0.08140804769769297,0.05477711137476839,0.0,0.0,0.06204848792128127,0.06397317805384084,0.1245420041764812,0.15409492292930058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065464776495884,0.14706867012939526,0.0,0.0,0.13332098380274585
mentalhealth,EnlightenedVision,2020/03/02,"Too many thoughts in such little time. I can never focus. I can't focus on anything ever. My mind is always racing with thoughts. I could be in class and think of the material, then random topics of music, politics, entertainment, life, dieting, peace, meditation, suicide, depression, statistics, death, dating suddenly pop up. This happens less than 30 seconds. All these random topics attack me all at once.

I can never focus on 1 particular thing. If I'm doing a task, I stop and go to another activity. This has been going on since childhood and it's very annoying. It can be a very serious situation and my mind still does this.

I don't know what it is. All I know is I need help, I was thinking of maybe weed? But at the same time that can be treating the problem and not getting rid of it.",2.9104824561403504,5.3403678552631595,4.897526315789474,77.99835087719299,77.6842105263158,7.737543859649122,26.580701754385963,8.648137234880735,2.3467933333333333,622,25,111,14,15,213,103,152,0.156,0.7879999999999999,0.057,-0.9402,0,0,0,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,2,0,5,0,17,2,0,0,6,30,29,8,2,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,6,1,1,6,1,0,2,5,5,0,1,4,0,12,2,15,21,5,22,0,1,0,0,1,9,0,3,11,81,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773159701520066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17356933192347254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13621449150899448,0.0,0.0,0.188310685011142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215971850994593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256803101233598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448536595193878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972850995449433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648094583447859,0.0,0.18814544375243053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463748443878049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094915657476516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18193845272675274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691650744343485,0.0,0.16590138643639168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16781824267467024,0.16629396641196112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3342698587031633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273605987413895,0.25532901805566777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17628069013999964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583868379567582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369255185762379,0.1860591116443661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13218995405656794,0.1383878561266332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181059504828521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099686822254438,0.21212584011016009,0.0,0.2628196544221566,0.19304007155978636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731539687576121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,11igor,2020/03/02,"I built a simple mood tracking application to make mood tracking easier and more intuitive Hi! I am currently working on a simple application for mood tracking.

Many existing apps ask you for a lot of writing and selecting stuff when you want to just quickly write down your mood and get back to business. These apps present your mood as a big still table where you have ""entries"".

For me, mood is more about a continuous flow. My design goals were to show all my mood as a continuous line where it would be easier to find patterns and to let me put down my mood in just one tap.

Please let me know what you think, the app is free: [https://apps.apple.com/app/moodline-track-your-mood/id1500129608](https://apps.apple.com/app/moodline-track-your-mood/id1500129608)",10.343597560975608,12.343326398373986,7.866412601626017,66.04888719512196,57.3739837398374,9.727235772357725,30.822154471544714,9.827888789773867,2.797732520325204,629,19,99,11,8,182,78,123,0.0,0.8959999999999999,0.10400000000000001,0.8955,1,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,6,0,2,9,9,0,0,7,0,9,0,0,1,1,16,15,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,14,2,17,10,4,17,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,8,68,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361610859654517,0.0,0.0,0.19424547482910492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308856913699746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198100144723013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13883069247759658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5166322586460504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147643862551472,0.0,0.0,0.16862258938950922,0.2561121356340079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171178578777224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772956007502793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25394802137746203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201738803262412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891839351309011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618656025349121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899897391248393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839068543831932,0.0,0.0,0.1794505708274872,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suckmycolt,2020/03/02,"Music is my only escape Hey guys and gals, im a 15 year old male from ireland and i have severe depression, im on different meds and i have lots of problems, i aint good at talkin that much so it is hard for me to write this.
The past year or two music has been my only therapy, everyday i have these dark impulses to end my own life and music kinda strays me away from that most of the time, i try to put my feelings into my own songs but i just cant focus on it its that damn cloud in my head fucking everything up and its also making life very hard and i just dunno what to do anymore i cant talk to people about it because i dont know what there is to talk about and its fucking me up, everyone says its gonna get better but i know deep in my heart it never will
If u took the time to read this rant or whatever this is thank you",0.9585869565217386,2.397601815217392,3.19608695652174,92.6309782608696,79.76086956521739,6.339130434782609,19.65217391304348,7.1686216300943375,0.2273652173913044,650,15,153,8,16,223,109,184,0.10099999999999999,0.852,0.047,-0.7754,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,7,8,3,0,4,0,15,6,2,1,1,26,25,14,0,2,7,0,3,0,0,2,2,2,0,2,17,8,0,0,3,2,0,2,5,5,0,1,2,5,21,3,23,21,5,21,0,1,0,2,8,10,3,7,9,104,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004514115148137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13647025048904662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12928733185766356,0.0,0.0,0.08388461541896665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12170317443427678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11852164767254955,0.0,0.0,0.14377116735280132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16127565852617387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187992492915105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149042860740826,0.12367327972641401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957878578321995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544329266295021,0.07189454830652757,0.0,0.0,0.11541913847854228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625364541640425,0.0,0.0,0.2465396422141781,0.0,0.14122560193674547,0.0,0.0,0.16306625112594206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29728070523174105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125161678288984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19439332933084816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698947858276365,0.0,0.0,0.0918544697001938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15285156826534535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115778073010273,0.0,0.1061318435265246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439654398183138,0.0,0.0,0.2093143090690701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13136249413069798,0.09540012425420223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167235930091356,0.0,0.13833413968728608,0.0,0.0,0.13764533032314336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943147764000176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15545797494373012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22120834308337425,0.0,0.12669104253283062,0.1573668454307155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604807696762892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15288765304731655,0.093426861377105,0.0,0.13442311027425805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354108707108054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723019868858636
mentalhealth,ShadowSam123,2020/03/02,"I’m not coping well and don’t know what to do For context I’m a 19 year old Male and in the past year I’ve lost 2 family members who were really close to me but I don’t think Ive coped with their passings well.

I moved house at the beginning of last year and haven’t really settled in making little friends, I’m still close with my old friends but don’t get to see them often and the only way I can contact them is through social media but it can get kind of lonely if I’m not speaking to them. 

My life seems to be very repetitive, boring and linear with nothing to do as the days pass by and I feel like I’m getting fed up with it.

This is the first time I’ve opened up about this and to be quite honest, I don’t know what to do, I usually put a happy face on when I’m around my family so I don’t worry them.

Any help would be appreciated.",3.6935294117647035,3.2111830588235293,5.30096256684492,87.33614973262033,71.35294117647058,8.511229946524066,25.02139037433156,8.00094639256281,1.0726941176470597,660,15,158,8,11,226,105,187,0.1,0.755,0.146,0.9196,0,2,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,5,3,8,11,0,0,7,0,19,3,1,1,0,29,38,14,0,2,6,0,1,1,2,1,1,1,0,1,7,15,1,0,5,0,0,4,8,3,2,1,3,3,17,8,26,31,0,31,0,2,1,0,13,11,0,3,16,95,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871701752408032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292274167979109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361926368615907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273696840587771,0.0,0.07339966646009084,0.10370573650376533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234770742162888,0.0,0.0,0.2243078733487982,0.0,0.2275277934184929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545305907501689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973008814581936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750064761817024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116676329147336,0.1595575159647436,0.11832865765349028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253416594107843,0.07092017120119119,0.1454932298157624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15846448814964947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689860728338133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15428717087886734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928950630344908,0.0,0.3046520012372018,0.0,0.0,0.1104043444999244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857619310287228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14593068273317208,0.0,0.15440059534222436,0.0,0.0,0.18599253012298486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11567752247070433,0.13215254926180173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14797719600643186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592876815566187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301571936182204,0.0,0.0,0.08464674135157903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987847897196528,0.11977613329583706,0.0,0.11522503290725065,0.0,0.0,0.2610411130904586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742186444504038,0.0,0.10312088346137747,0.0,0.0,0.2804440460687468
mentalhealth,Gadajaca_Ksiazka,2020/03/02,"The parabole of productivity I fell into a cliche of mine again. At the start of the school year, I've decided to be more productive, take care of the house, school and personal projects. There were small bumps along the way, but overall I showed stellar progress. Even though I did a lot some days, I didn't feel drained. Eventually, the routine became the basis of my motivation. It still worked, but only for some time. Until I started struggling in school. It's nothing unusual - the end of the term is approaching and I have tons of tests to study for and some larger homework. But it was more than enough to completely throw my habits off. Because I slowly started dropping them even before that. And now I'm just tired (and a little sleep-deprived) high-school student that keeps postponing her work. I know I should do it. But lately, I don't have the energy to motivate myself to get up from that console/book/website or whatever.  Even now, instead of studying, I'm ranting on Reddit, and just a moment ago, I was writing a journal about the exact same thing. I can't help but feel I've been here before. That I've been here before so many times. That so many times I've tried to achieve something - write a book, a game, draw a story and tons of tons of other ideas. And even if I planned it out, even if I followed it for a while, ultimately it always failed. I know that I have the entire life ahead of me but I'm just tired of this. If I continue working like that, I will never do anything. For now, I dream of merely publishing a project. It doesn't even have to become popular. I just want to show myself that I can finish something on my own. And times like these make me lose faith in myself. I know I'll get up eventually. But will I ever actually bring any of my ideas to life? Does anybody relate? Do you have any methods for regularity?",3.5248760330578537,5.354359931129482,4.277209366391187,85.94854132231407,73.65564738292011,7.043856749311295,26.425068870523425,7.793537801064563,1.4688087052341596,1457,52,289,20,30,466,191,363,0.07400000000000001,0.831,0.095,0.7375,2,0,3,0,0,0,54.0,0,1,1,11,24,8,0,1,22,0,24,4,0,3,3,51,44,25,0,5,15,0,2,2,0,3,4,0,1,1,20,12,0,1,10,5,0,5,5,3,0,0,7,2,36,5,44,33,13,45,1,2,0,0,8,12,0,8,28,203,56,17,0.0,0.0,0.09376587621629097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517426054436791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995107942781479,0.0,0.0,0.1306832722137406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907042295206305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05857300931990363,0.10611921244935313,0.2452858056697843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796587266147323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10074412885003173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06196738934988539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408532746749509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510349535643448,0.0992823124752352,0.0,0.3807825717512879,0.08691510337064462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971677308835023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004017250833425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644042835630456,0.1015199188019394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087010769609004,0.0,0.21693833584445726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854054702356593,0.0,0.0,0.15841872163137288,0.0,0.10838896293231727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357364784204327,0.0938853327519702,0.09630321009562297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749542777218132,0.0,0.08168870757926272,0.0,0.0,0.06413801485472118,0.19483183147928027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410728926835028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219691257553904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307757754301962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389841074269165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3889758207429593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615518787224754,0.0,0.0,0.1479430799599674,0.0,0.0,0.20403006258092374,0.0,0.07673424069256557,0.0,0.0,0.10044973629541708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722445604615875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383513324257939,0.0,0.09440380657783293,0.0,0.2241136010689572,0.22087297509808326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523594815138423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056673891895125075,0.07626843232770034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20985481128630096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187610223702459
mentalhealth,Jademists,2020/03/02,Fresh self harm and upcoming psychiatrist appointment So... I have pretty recent cuts (today in fact) and have a doctor appointment on Wednesday. What reaction do you think I will get? I’m not suicidal at all.,3.4013513513513525,6.580786972972972,4.836540540540541,73.56724324324324,84.67567567567569,9.446486486486489,26.318918918918918,9.3871,3.6560637837837837,166,7,26,6,5,55,32,37,0.133,0.654,0.212,0.5252,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,2,6,7,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,3,6,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,17,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3889693328682232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985461740935216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.386619703025708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3752265665719576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3964465523811816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4156831498556318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24350319931084216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36021708145001663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_BL4CKfish,2020/03/02,"Seeking help and not finding anything As a 30 something Irish-American man, simply working up the nerve to look for and pursue some form of therapy has taken such a leap from me. Mental health is simply not something that is acceptably discussed in my family, among my friends, with my coworkers. I cannot find the words to describe the anxiety I have felt over just searching. It feels like being in water and thrashing and slipping below the surface further and further (I am an excellent swimmer and this is a visceral feeling I have constantly). Now that I have tried contacting 4 different therapists and either received no responses to messages or been told that they simply don’t have room in their schedule I feel completely defeated. I have no idea how to do this. One of my biggest problems I have that I am seeking help for is really crippling anxiety over exposing myself like this and I can’t even get in a room with someone. I want to give up. I know I shouldn’t but I want to because now my inability to find help seems to be snowballing everything. I am not sleeping well and I am crying a lot. I don’t know what to do anymore.",5.151536697247708,6.706843637614683,5.908153669724772,76.97168004587158,69.04587155963304,9.119724770642202,35.18463302752293,9.516144504307137,3.604613761467889,915,47,158,20,16,299,127,218,0.10099999999999999,0.8,0.098,-0.3955,1,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,3,7,8,0,0,10,0,25,3,1,1,0,38,39,13,0,4,7,0,4,2,1,1,1,0,2,1,9,11,1,0,12,0,0,1,10,2,1,1,4,5,26,6,27,32,4,21,0,1,1,0,13,16,0,4,6,125,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193989490786777,0.0,0.1422127985208342,0.0,0.0,0.11800476279493105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741440620813289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15035061890509066,0.15496285578655106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575165396505969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14982093154060794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094713369378746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12887734249124813,0.0,0.13518336157595434,0.0,0.21751979955604026,0.10244393062910312,0.13768506613493126,0.0,0.3931909454603531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078934006737234,0.0,0.07491980762417677,0.13756092604362735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15242592008459194,0.0,0.0,0.28835101373274163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187947342821404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15761615169909848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011454609312107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041864012379275,0.0,0.0,0.1219122928779512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14451197946478825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971705476602046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721301629417507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186476320313601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054462602985908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350207969983486,0.0,0.12150109980662255,0.22079037149467995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16398870378635255,0.16649673300396398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702343011720605,0.0,0.09735818147796643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691603236725903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893249005474186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439582970330223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tinydott,2020/03/02,"My friend completely changed her behaviour and mental state in a matter of weeks I know her for over 8 years. She's always been this caring, nice, popular funny person. Not too down to earth, but enough to count on her.

End of summer last year, after over an year of long distance relationship she moved aboard with her boyfriend. New place, jobless, new life. With him. He loved her lots, awesome guy, the only down side was that he used to get a bit too jelouse, even on her friends. He was trying to keep it under control so I didn't worry much she wouldn't be happy. Yet, she was crying every time we talked saying she feels lost, she misses her friends, colleagues, everything. But she promised me she will try to fight. She got better and better in time, especially after she finally found a job. 

Fast forward beginning of this year, she came to visit us. She seemed extremely happy, hyped. She was acting like she owns the world and nothing can break her. I thought that was hot and felt happy for her. When I drove her back to the airport she started telling me she decided to break up with her boyfriend and come back home, because she found her soul mate. And stated that she saw the ""signs"" that lead to her destiny. I tried support her, all I asked from her was to be smart about it. She needs a place to live, a job, she can't just go, split and come back with no back up. We live in a poor country, it's hard living. From this point, things go crazy. She started yelling at me she owns the truth and we're not on the same level of knowledge, but in time I will grow to understand, so she will be patient with me. Signs are there and she can see them, I'm too blind to see them. That night she left her boyfriend. Our group of friends supported her with money for plane, food and a place to live until she figures things out and find a job. 

Except, the minute she got back, she started preaching about the signs and how we share the Eve's sins. How she found the secret and how secret services are tracking her. She spams everyone with messages about the ""truth"", stating that something big it's gonna come. She got obsessed with her ""soul mate"", chasing him at work and the places he goes to, texting him about these damn secrets, signs and truths. He got scared, reached to one of our common friends and eventually blocked her. 

She is verbally agressive and call us blind, mundane, not open to debate ideas, even though nothing of what we have to say matters to her, as much as we try to listen to her and further understand. She doesn't sleep, she is on the phone 24/7 texting people, writing ""articles"" and Facebook posts. Donates money to charity and spam us to donate as well, even tho she has no money, she lives on our money and the little her family sends her in order to survive. Donating it's a beautiful thing, but she is getting things to the extreme. Even nice ones. And the way she is approaching everything looks like an obsession. Not to mention extremely distructive. Everyone is avoiding her now and are scared of her. We all told her she needs help, but she claims that we are the ones that need help. She is helping us and the world to see the truth, even tho we fight it. We can hate her now, but we will thank her later once we are awaken. She is mean to everyone and has this weird superiority. She shows no respect or gratitude. She won't accept help or any word from us, except money.

Her family it's basically non-existent, her mother is old and weak. Us, the few friends that are still around, are all she's got. And we don't know how to help her if she doesn't accept any sort of help. She is getting extremely hard to live with, not even gonna get into that. 

There must be some back window in her brain to access. We talked to therapists but they can't help without her actually stepping their door. Which will never happen, since in her mind, she is above everything. All I have said it s only 1% of how bad things are. And are evolving to the worse extremely quickly.

If anyone experienced this or has any input, I'd be forever grateful. I am literally out of options and ideas.

Thank you so much for the patience of reading all this, I'm sorry I couldn't be shorter.

Tl;dr: My friend went from this nice balanced person to this superior being that owns the secrets of the universe and it's here to rescue our souls, preaching about it, getting obsessed over things, paranoid, delusional, mean and she won't accept any mental help. She is scared to go public with everything she knows because ""the Secret Services"" are after her. She shows no gratitude, respect, or notion of the material world. She bareley sleeps. She is hyped with her ideas, constantly telling she never been this happy. She states that she is changing the world, saving it. She calls everyone blind, mundane. She chased a guy at his work and to places he was going to, from the shadows, because he is her ""soul mate"" and she wants to be close to him, even tho he rejected her. All she sees are these ""signs"" she won't stop talking about. Almost lost all her friends already. Helpppppp? :((((

(sorry for my spelling/grammar errors, English it's not my native language)",3.7950999162814414,5.7488548791540826,3.977414188475958,87.8554329705529,73.21953675730109,6.759358885693832,26.163251192079496,7.51848757151975,1.3104623666872928,4057,141,793,49,83,1254,396,993,0.121,0.718,0.16,0.9940000000000001,4,2,1,0,3,0,163.0,23,1,4,9,46,61,4,7,40,0,68,10,3,8,14,168,137,63,0,9,23,1,5,2,11,12,5,5,3,4,43,67,1,5,29,3,9,19,24,19,1,3,28,20,153,42,119,88,19,118,7,4,9,1,198,46,1,12,48,541,196,9,0.0,0.0,0.041292430307527835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04237143076450648,0.0,0.04669463056057365,0.0,0.03520869754013007,0.0,0.0,0.11510007964513695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02958698293181126,0.0,0.0,0.03766849510558444,0.0395579452575692,0.0,0.0,0.1952214564497141,0.035330482586274026,0.07738279647700083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748467159785709,0.04619600727899429,0.0,0.0,0.047236498357194366,0.08641479683733103,0.048396025669563233,0.043142016399002135,0.0,0.08952535487365831,0.10934947862374612,0.04436549934047096,0.04572647938706257,0.04745882968749522,0.0,0.0,0.04648002107921626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03747770823179318,0.04372174754915351,0.0,0.19563631796895686,0.0,0.03565143057653294,0.16173163616523414,0.15211663762838096,0.0,0.07977988228470917,0.0,0.02139526615414137,0.0,0.04062814476778432,0.04635299748373175,0.038674295143212564,0.0,0.051166343716588986,0.13918558739372516,0.2615339759548565,0.0,0.11053678062465512,0.0,0.09619224878227163,0.0,0.1692121438589494,0.0,0.0,0.08379516760291085,0.03741819404711503,0.18017646550774086,0.0758101942042114,0.041776385703401184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268978436802597,0.0,0.04244446420593803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330231010519734,0.0,0.0,0.12597056161175862,0.03761069132925022,0.0,0.0,0.06976412194220599,0.0344916161919514,0.0,0.0,0.04597436294132522,0.0,0.029887680366981813,0.041345036339416615,0.042409816361038015,0.22418460436639795,0.03744662209563186,0.03553316333446533,0.0,0.09238161597873112,0.035973910773764814,0.0381901019519428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218485821409686,0.0,0.0,0.08528526422205683,0.0,0.042725150244801086,0.0,0.0,0.04497316192734607,0.0933171347237613,0.09412604448851908,0.06527044167612651,0.08173438865591102,0.0,0.039708890055253215,0.0,0.0812029864321418,0.0,0.04440150047824666,0.04506310560400782,0.08601933067239363,0.06436351686785234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0293352496250238,0.0738940309268509,0.22104599528284796,0.0,0.04000047507325648,0.0,0.04052518420155248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04232552270046342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04542947763377808,0.0,0.0,0.04025037221295927,0.06729969669328299,0.12709130319930834,0.0,0.13487534756894726,0.038521141862979336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035002637546881536,0.0,0.08468926125669142,0.0,0.0,0.03257543983611065,0.0,0.0947342784020294,0.08985035366522375,0.0,0.03379207248796897,0.0353764588168677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603501472183316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203134452211443,0.07396872783801771,0.07791422468281295,0.0,0.04912989884624832,0.16866953503494253,0.0,0.041573360812931136,0.03359264657016196,0.07402102683732915,0.0,0.0,0.040432909041308536,0.0,0.11491390903756167,0.0,0.0,0.08810088229187303,0.305391711092835,0.03654577222651912,0.0,0.0,0.024957935933298824,0.03358694072555155,0.033941796142064176,0.0,0.03804543236433097,0.039225568588657486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040789255341665616,0.0,0.06161029661970958,0.04297199400022295,0.04312165427028215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899549995907334
mentalhealth,guacgawd,2020/03/02,"i know something’s wrong with me  i know something’s wrong with me, i know what it is, but i don’t even know how to walk into a therapist office & tell them without thinking i’m lying or just trying to get meds or anything. i just want help, and idk what to do.",1.2094736842105256,2.750653105263158,2.9331929824561414,94.33768421052632,79.35087719298245,5.261754385964913,21.92631578947368,5.6839178017228535,0.0395010526315791,205,6,47,1,5,68,38,57,0.10300000000000001,0.741,0.156,0.6077,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,17,11,5,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,8,0,7,11,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,30,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23936965130049165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818005568617269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14591735865127392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542299161024935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480798278155253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4856533494176796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24539531434684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3401541729056769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19309617587062264,0.0,0.0,0.2565082803342506,0.0,0.14155834459890146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499920103945132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030593136325472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21296159751007213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.483088579115526,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,krakebolle,2020/03/02,"I [F20] don't want to die, but I dont want to live anymore I've struggled a lot with my mental health since I was about 11-12. Took a lot of different pills now, don't know if it's enough to do any harm. I posted a similar kinda post when I was 16 hoping for advice, I was desperate to hear that it would get better. I feel like it never does. I just really wish I was mentally healthy, it's all I want in this world. I feel like everyone thinks I'm pathetic and overreacting because different things trigger me and my emotions are so intense. Doctors think I might have a personality disorder, I think so too as I feel like I feel so much more than everyone else. I feel so much sadness, anger and frustration, my emotions are always so overwhelming and I HAVE to let them out. I was able to keep my head up this past week, but suddenly I became so angry over everything and wanted to punch someone. I want to scream and break things and hit people so they can see the pain I constantly feel inside, I'm not overreacting; I'm in pain!!!!! I don't know what to do anymore. I wish something happened to me, that I was pushed in front of a train or got a terminal illness. People only see struggles if they're physical, I'm tired of being in pain constantly. I want to be happy and able to experience romantic relationships, too, instead of always being scared and think that I just have to accept that I don't deserve love and that nobody really cares. It's all I want. please help. I don't know what to do",4.8186108714409,5.104329967213115,6.107247627264888,79.86813632441763,69.0,9.699741156169113,29.495254529767042,9.682069395223575,2.5440163934426225,1180,41,242,25,19,399,154,305,0.22699999999999998,0.613,0.16,-0.9739,2,0,1,0,0,2,37.0,0,0,2,1,16,21,2,4,7,0,27,10,1,1,3,54,65,24,1,13,8,0,6,3,0,2,8,2,0,1,16,12,0,1,14,0,0,3,8,12,0,0,8,10,37,9,30,50,8,22,0,2,2,1,7,8,0,8,11,156,53,1,0.16432400549259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028775817639427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13673073629145566,0.0,0.0,0.055872979322606535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629652582711923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05008519427400312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266561460476599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376963761028441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17757587276504627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527118714332439,0.17168361115802735,0.09416477332935036,0.08409629131298661,0.07190052228324867,0.0,0.09629325530799114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863581049660926,0.1848423887726907,0.0,0.08489531212467026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15701862919872006,0.07384191023184977,0.08037020433813072,0.0,0.0,0.2492614636829252,0.17608965353609266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042926255323332725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571245923800338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265558768436768,0.08746297971966409,0.0,0.0,0.08432191855606484,0.08733436685085189,0.09260254844754832,0.0,0.05507145854015398,0.0,0.0,0.0816054074648484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07302936315689755,0.0,0.0,0.13546226396208638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401621445408368,0.0,0.1204206131363303,0.0,0.07255055370264872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970239318775493,0.07415441529728915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559994811796286,0.0871609009601889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079705139945475,0.0,0.06336840164474543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06248790545019735,0.26227849132190945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843292844573252,0.11392157508670893,0.07174069166188328,0.0,0.09018920622906997,0.0,0.0,0.15737697391133507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527016567519244,0.0,0.0,0.08821124267835874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225849802630836,0.0,0.13094495727688327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796525771044447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06961559830115918,0.06325232378637102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717871291075616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916956759040987,0.21058437521424195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443313563799967,0.0,0.0,0.09128500818327484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33922894574696955,0.0,0.06590540266747083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889644966795201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058365529407946336,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dull_Gukat,2020/03/02,"How can someone know they are depressed if depression is all they have known all their adult life? If a ""depressed state"" is the norm, how would anyone know what ""Not depressed"" feel like?",7.572352941176473,8.05341329411765,5.2694117647058825,87.56235294117648,63.11764705882353,7.976470588235292,31.70588235294117,7.1686216300943375,1.7509294117647052,148,5,28,1,2,41,26,34,0.365,0.635,0.0,-0.9439,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,3,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,2,2,12,9,4,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,8,2,1,0,4,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,19,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17322928068537316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8535306877844152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526747233727248,0.1769892985244747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27230868587373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17498983871586182,0.1210358440651809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209913796675595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17599115962491274,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnknownSomeone19,2020/03/02,"Im breaking a law, but I think i3 won the fight with depression because of it?! The fear is kicking in but the adrenaline keeps me going. I'm doing something illegal and I fucking hate it but I also LOVE IT. No, I am NOT hurting anyone. I am just breaking a law. 

It changed me. Just 4 days ago I was depressed and just thinking about others and how can I help them. Now I'm cold...I hate it but its true. I became a perfectionist, stronger and I actually smiled today...I'm not afraid of the dark anymore, I enjoy it. 

I feel this adrenaline kick every once in a while and I feel like I finally won this PTSD, depression and anxiety I've been fighting with since I was 15. 

I know and I am very aware of the fact that this is wrong but it's fucking amazing too. I never taught I would become this person because I was always that girl at the side, giving fake smiles, always happy but dying inside, always making sure others are okay and forgeting about myself. 

I don't feel the need to eat or drink, time seems to go by faster, I feel strong, I exercise more then 2 hours a day and before I'd exercise for 1 hour and feel dizzy.

What is this?! Am I going crazy or did I just beat my depression, PTSD etc.??",1.762216330858962,3.7094142601626032,3.547158006362676,88.68135206786852,79.16260162601625,6.3920820077766,22.484270060091905,7.423996415210882,0.8727845881937082,932,29,195,13,23,312,143,246,0.209,0.5489999999999999,0.242,0.9059999999999999,0,0,2,0,3,0,37.0,0,0,1,4,10,26,6,2,12,1,17,7,0,2,4,47,43,22,1,2,14,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,18,12,2,1,9,3,0,3,5,15,0,0,8,5,29,11,14,34,2,21,0,5,0,3,8,4,2,3,13,124,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.10814350839651464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823449352832304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886220373730538,0.276631240862124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477634944360928,0.0,0.10990282271983344,0.07748732911297193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13510865531901467,0.12239104891502382,0.09429893779199636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723197077982855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293837291108508,0.0,0.3817934996364428,0.0,0.11501278570831618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085605815749063,0.0,0.11339566051924772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359265037058655,0.0,0.0,0.0933699167907338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470235774840373,0.2801674698914781,0.07916922572200003,0.0,0.12139696635079647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049010442147237,0.0,0.10630783041607927,0.1889432370483793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796905004970425,0.0,0.21882194312346745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427974292274188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182690876370815,0.0,0.11863419631584653,0.0,0.11970370292437255,0.0,0.0,0.09850115586008486,0.0,0.0,0.06090330883767345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414064092651358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001861310523907,0.0,0.07397264578403452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821709984668317,0.0854705633075754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180187822069562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967630107319377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25908332127114875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008855956764305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167074931797513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531399884192235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444574110363672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420168783350365,0.0,0.0,0.0646195398501567,0.0,0.10504360019759942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143740792643804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872274740664356,0.12116334815812005,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway1822821,2020/03/02,"need help with current mental condition that i am afraid i am not able to treat well.  m 14.

i am having strong panic attacks and extreme paranoia from time to time, as well as anger issues. i just had my biggest panic attack in a long time.

i've noticed that something's wrong with me when i was 12, but it just degenerated even worse. when i was 13 i asked my parents if we could find and consult a specialist, which we did. but the psychologist i we got apparently doesn't get the situation like i do, and sometimes gives me questions about my problems that i can't answer, like ""what did you do that probably could've stuttered your emotional condition before you got driven mad?"" i don't fucking know, it happens for no reason

i feel like i should get special treatment because those simple techniques like telling myself to calm down during a panic attack, forcefully easening my breath don't work anymore. they did work before, they just stopped. it doesn't help anymore. but to get special treatment i should be diagnosed or at least have a receipt for medicine, which i can't get due to heavy load of time and the fact that there is no local psychiatrist for my area.

only thing that can stop my anger and/or panic attack is sharp pain, like a razor cut, which i use, but i know that this is not a proper way of treating my mental problems.

and to top it off, my parents often forget what my current condition is and do things that push me to another panic attack.

i am totally serious.

i don't know what to do. please help me. i don't want to live like this. i can't interact with people around me because of what i suffer.",5.6858490566037725,6.264546924528303,6.121691823899372,79.49272641509438,67.17610062893083,8.624150943396227,31.62327044025157,8.548686976883017,2.429580628930817,1294,50,242,18,20,418,162,318,0.24,0.623,0.138,-0.9896,5,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,3,3,2,5,13,37,10,6,9,0,34,4,1,2,2,46,52,16,0,8,11,2,2,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,24,13,0,2,8,0,0,2,13,23,2,0,9,2,45,14,27,39,2,24,0,1,0,1,19,9,1,4,18,167,69,3,0.07967919457096713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355058286461574,0.0,0.0,0.15804070115225838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093137613839802,0.07448929102322482,0.4532329334324144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714339490983116,0.0,0.13560225185982275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272347066196925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087270525566229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962836936594587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052627356541742484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04028819486700309,0.056922832522154784,0.0,0.0,0.07282534032754448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366213144742309,0.16651636210340928,0.0764355438793502,0.0,0.0,0.12745346146270087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046004861452515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16022185366674568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316437782743792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313688046357355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335633782947799,0.0,0.0703581885966798,0.0705135798372771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16059577476193193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059081113162963675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071529112919187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059961795323926,0.08478428082442896,0.4674318349375091,0.17694863234823527,0.0,0.0,0.05523952096928557,0.0,0.0,0.08746382842586198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590764823838404,0.15248445658827808,0.0,0.0,0.08925893335981222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192348257007036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895627531251512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134093675397096,0.07880476082241615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323074891897024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964312805768808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587063273183013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18584631646976035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881724127288383,0.0,0.0,0.04699685337470272,0.06324563588920717,0.0,0.0,0.14328233001175916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601480524458264,0.0,0.08119990645184774,0.0,0.08711669101383708,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sanedsarsye,2020/03/02,"I keep bragging with the things I have in order to feel better about myself. How do I stop? I’m not sure if this is the right r/ for this but anyway, I am a teen girl and I come from a family that’s kind of well off. Therefore I have a lot of expensive things, clothes and I travel like a lot! But lately I’ve noticed that I can only feel good about myself when people acknowledge what I have so I keep kind of lowkey bragging with it. I feel like everyone’s gonna say that I’m a jerk and yeah maybe you’re right but at least I’ve realized that how I feel is wrong and I want to change it. Like deep down I know that I’m not more than others just because I have expensive things. 
I think it might be because when I was little I used to be made fun of and I often felt like I was less than everyone else (I still feel this way sometimes) and the only thing that works and makes me feel like I’m worth something are my expensive things. I really wish I could change this way of thinking but I don’t know where to start.",0.6882316313823154,2.6253196849315046,2.2475238688252404,96.67908156911585,82.74429223744292,5.625653798256539,17.717102532171022,6.782984794422108,-0.21571415525114146,797,17,188,9,22,259,114,219,0.049,0.7659999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.9822,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,13,14,1,0,8,1,17,0,0,6,1,48,42,17,0,4,8,0,7,5,0,2,0,1,0,1,20,10,0,3,13,1,4,2,3,2,1,0,4,8,28,12,21,33,5,20,0,0,0,0,2,9,0,5,11,124,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459936668518918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764108782411436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335801357057959,0.0951010511392306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814655359369827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922262233248784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109865835031238,0.0,0.0,0.10407663704295406,0.0,0.3349336629024465,0.15774159868554755,0.10600268026556656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09259947646520016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196259716525513,0.0,0.2299321880699529,0.12134747073349993,0.0,0.12453761498469612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696827957998844,0.11065123031178156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18771868533249653,0.0,0.10446449675432068,0.07369380778048208,0.0,0.11091306933691343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711846423885545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256927529245334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16793051561439612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765384465445175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072597918463333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885644256929613,0.0,0.08779564352892233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499240989698169,0.1091898312625428,0.0,0.07814269611834082,0.0,0.0881667197930577,0.09230053388669457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405203554369337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.366729002252073,0.14148154933056498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095351383395132,0.0,0.0,0.06511762025923906,0.1752630231667524,0.0,0.0,0.09926413882622756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695618908805348,0.0,0.0,0.0803735515241194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070662600432855,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IPlantToiletPaper,2020/03/02,"Panic Attack or something else.. Last year mid April I was heading out of my house to travel to the airport to start my new job as a treeplanter. Unfortunately my dog ran out the gate and I had to sprint to catch her, four blocks later and I’m able to grab her. As we are in the car finally on our way. I’m catching my breath but not fully. As I am sitting in the passenger seat, it felt like half of my lungs weren’t giving me oxygen as I was trying to get my heart back down to a resting beat level. As we are getting closer to the airport my mind is filling with thoughts of self doubt in being able to even do my new job properly.

Then the tingling started to happen, it started in my calves/knees and worked its way up, then the tips of my fingers started too, more minutes passed and my entire hands and most of my lower portion of my body feels like its asleep/numb. The feeling started to creepy into my chest cavity and made my stomach feel like it flipped. My arms started to fold themselves towards my chest and then tingly/numb feeling was creeping into my lower jaw. My voice was slurring like I was having a stroke of some sorts. We pulled into a parking lot and after about 30 seconds of getting out of the car my body was fully functional again.

This has never happened since that occurrence other than a minor reoccurrence of tingling the next day in my knees and finger tips but other than that I have no health concerns or records that can help me relate to what has happened to me. To this day I am still wondering what had happened to me.

TLDR; Suffered stroke like symptoms from what  I think was a panic attack but need further opinions. Thanks!",6.156456996148907,6.14811368292683,6.108485237483954,82.01533376123236,66.13414634146342,8.002824133504491,32.20218228498074,7.0608816371341465,1.9676195121951208,1320,49,252,9,19,416,178,328,0.094,0.8190000000000001,0.086,-0.4085,5,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,4,0,0,2,6,12,2,3,16,0,22,21,15,1,1,44,50,22,0,1,6,0,11,5,0,0,6,1,1,1,15,19,0,1,8,1,0,9,4,6,0,3,14,12,39,6,53,35,6,55,0,1,0,0,9,19,0,9,29,178,54,3,0.1991628586467369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265765037944716,0.0,0.07657197235487492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212250379039781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284435674949391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831875061897565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577259489325721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20140545101224747,0.14228198601184966,0.09561378860391737,0.1090865883219393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608156024860606,0.09552758096513417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.352238116311736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219927572883136,0.10585040273317116,0.0,0.11800447321408003,0.06674733298901307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490359938053647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976384058736547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117215585486715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24325228157555914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466057014511602,0.0,0.0942263562040022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054885614211627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383836805156839,0.07680333729456952,0.1923527299433439,0.10590597981208688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23367470258682865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10388514868702373,0.0,0.0,0.08237478738238703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666264940158556,0.0,0.0,0.4229054893073045,0.0,0.0795258580922183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350323411527322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916812009339858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380775898853186,0.0,0.07905653152915894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760925381387045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15808620692577702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10799181224181777,0.07249646655651136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412717557884112
mentalhealth,SignificantJudgment3,2020/03/02,"Struggling with analyzing my romantic relationships I’ve been in a relationship for about 3 months now, and it’s been a huge trigger for depression and anxiety. I was mostly single for a year and a half before that. And during that alone time I definitely had my bouts of depression, but it didn’t affect me as much because nobody else really had to deal with it. I have had serious relationships before, but they were often sort of emotionally taxing, and a similar pattern occurs. 

I just don’t know how to tell if things are good or if I’m “happy”. My depression has been bad this winter, I don’t feel any joy or desire for anything, much less excitement about another person. But logically I know there are a lot of things I like about my partner. He’s always supportive and showing me love. He has his downfalls like anybody, and I have a hard time not hyperfocusing on them. Like the instant he says something I disagree with, I’m instantly like—“see I knew this man would hurt me.”

I think my possibly Borderline mother, several mental/physical health issues, and also some painful relationships, made me absolutely terrified to let myself love. But I don’t know how much of this fear is me being guarded, or if I just straight up am with the “wrong” person. How could you ever tell the difference when you have apathy about most things? I’m always questioning people's value and whether they've “tricked” me into loving them. 

Besides, I believe people look for this movie romance, always believing something better, or The One, is out there, when the truth is real life doesn’t look like that—it looks more like a steady companion who’s there in good and bad and not always easy. It’s about who you actively choose to love.  It's just hard to know the difference between choosing and settling. 

My therapist, my friends and family, they all think it’s normal for me to feel this way when I’m depressed and tell me to keep my expectations low and take it day by day. That it's nothing wrong with me or him but just my inaccurate thought processes. But I obsess over it. The more I try to just enjoy the positives in our relationship, to relax, the more I think about it. And of course you’re going to feel shitty if you’re constantly thinking about how bad things could be and beating yourself up for not having the supposed right feelings. 

Comparing myself to neurotypical people and relationships just makes me feel panicked that something is wrong because I don’t feel what other people feel. And it makes me feel like maybe I’m just broken. 

Mostly a vent, and I’m curious if anyone can relate.",5.997324056895486,7.177950471428575,6.4800927643784805,75.0503184910328,66.73469387755102,9.694495980210267,30.970933828076678,9.873865916822265,3.0727891156462586,2081,79,366,46,33,676,232,490,0.177,0.628,0.195,0.9422,0,1,3,0,0,0,48.0,1,3,4,2,28,40,1,3,19,0,34,7,0,9,3,104,72,46,0,11,27,1,10,6,3,1,3,1,0,4,28,27,0,2,22,2,1,1,9,18,0,2,12,14,50,22,47,54,14,28,0,6,3,4,38,13,0,18,19,255,78,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661425626198619,0.0,0.051071028616612016,0.21255573951427573,0.0,0.0,0.043428868888218716,0.06696567545775428,0.048854839008281734,0.0,0.0,0.04465432887640527,0.0,0.05255361261087381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15996821903797356,0.07786029532477673,0.0,0.10868501544866284,0.1439029296758255,0.0,0.0564814242521584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901295930091841,0.0,0.10197843962696444,0.0,0.0,0.0823723979919876,0.06583970460124533,0.2200196172819867,0.0,0.0,0.13344598998716972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053349143919515854,0.07183701284877038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057767525479712034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060204129455727014,0.07186336344671039,0.25832745527237544,0.04562357075343725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04934021238984389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03629468001506021,0.10713011156082264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798309889448408,0.11441698371141655,0.0,0.0,0.0678831308690682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836640879120187,0.0,0.0,0.06665613265992955,0.0,0.05676415820281438,0.0,0.0,0.14038921788277098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530400215358784,0.04510815825783775,0.21840084169000284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608859103896916,0.0,0.0,0.054293837474553616,0.2305545484398739,0.0604284906278135,0.08525778060777506,0.0,0.06415872932112213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435864457116015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050974648258570426,0.0,0.14083943717283776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257194853670772,0.061278043628917485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04327506109050204,0.0,0.06795448264924467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17709759558063387,0.11152500295875424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199566989307628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154091040590363,0.0,0.0,0.07268980580078194,0.04091212137222859,0.0,0.0,0.41138824589530426,0.0,0.054538450788329015,0.0,0.0507862325190487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721467445446129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749402537133127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06676322613493803,0.0,0.0,0.07247070681256232,0.0,0.0,0.0480168500684877,0.0,0.1674566095701914,0.0,0.0,0.07414959023706688,0.1697103284968074,0.16368271983997226,0.0,0.05069990039978127,0.0744777815248716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04335862411573764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050691288820076175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04536627462827279,0.20947171847403373,0.0,0.04112552564448586
mentalhealth,1Fire3473,2020/03/02,Any advice? I'm considering going to a psychiatrist and asking about taking anti-anxiety medication. Any testimonies on how it works? I feel like I'm always stuck thinking negative. feeling hopeless. even though I can try to think positive it's like there's just a weight holding me down. I'm always anxious of losing my wife and my job and feeling like everyone is always going to leave me. Do these issues seem like problems that could get solved with medication?,4.828147058823529,7.562554094117647,5.906691176470589,71.63886029411766,72.76470588235293,8.485294117647058,29.448529411764717,9.188382445141503,3.160441176470588,378,16,58,9,8,125,61,85,0.17800000000000002,0.622,0.2,0.2593,1,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,2,6,7,0,0,2,0,4,3,0,1,0,15,19,5,0,2,1,1,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,4,1,1,6,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,1,4,6,4,8,17,0,4,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,33,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15571515679443332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39777635826121865,0.0,0.0,0.21672718066625032,0.0,0.12190245556960365,0.1800203521262313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14897091253203254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722815649414174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524929450231464,0.0,0.0,0.1522659308260171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24171672482697645,0.22767960839067594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325389486632723,0.0,0.18112476502885805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632019294222314,0.15813047074182526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687288378487309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31140180573329496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827209711640385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32105709433610913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524766065891566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14506642389384158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981150794650852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20421032888289395,0.15656074796101188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081883157762912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940455964669211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600883272686098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,XSnxwy,2020/03/02,"My depression is ruining my day to day life. I'm working at a very stressful job I cant take anymore. I'm wanting to quit to start school again and maybe work part time. I like what I do at my job but the people are awful. Theres only 8 of us running a store and the managers want you so involved it takes over the other parts of life and I cant stand it. My partner is working his dream job and loving life. I (20f) have been depressed for most of my life but a lot the last 5 years. It got better after moving in together, he makes me the happiest person alive. I was on 2 antidepressants when we started dating but I hated the side effects. Now I have my legal medical mj card which suits my life better than what I've tried in the past (different for everybody). Now my issue is just random mood changes and depressive moods. I feel happy all day and then one thing happens and I'm sitting here hyperventilating in tears. This happens everyday. It gets bad to the point where I wouldnt eat for days(I eat on my medication now). I just sit on the floor and do nothing. I cant bring myself to do anything else. I dont want to do things I enjoy because it takes too much effort. I get physically sick when I get this upset. I dont know what I'm doing with my life and I'm going crazy in my head. Nobody else around me understands things I've went through so I cant really talk about it to others. Just gets blown off everytime. I dont know what to do anymore..everyday life is so exhausting to me at this point",1.6485516506922266,3.6617031469648613,3.483472843450482,88.67072577209801,79.83067092651757,6.473652822151225,22.573908413205533,7.554174236665415,0.9241498189563364,1187,38,252,18,30,398,170,313,0.14,0.738,0.122,-0.8078,4,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,2,1,0,8,18,17,1,2,12,1,23,15,1,2,1,32,53,18,0,4,6,0,1,1,1,1,11,0,0,2,19,12,2,0,5,1,1,5,8,9,0,1,4,1,38,6,33,48,6,45,0,4,0,1,10,18,0,3,20,161,57,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476566436175427,0.0,0.0,0.07033651134217818,0.07608856678852917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713658928078106,0.05210318827904307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118680296822554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904184773572392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536790197122614,0.0,0.2208517864562677,0.0,0.0,0.0893004773791582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.300519086570764,0.0,0.0,0.1749192288565189,0.14280246323595722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04321741904380985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17862322753427284,0.0,0.04857594075296366,0.0,0.06836009494593857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116594113354784,0.09098697061748567,0.0,0.08438631022733226,0.08771935224093184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921099041421188,0.25445453723910083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939468033248767,0.06967142262809782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42260184012344987,0.04175750252389936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266558711416096,0.07714218778547224,0.0,0.05705349789299673,0.0,0.08586852489111528,0.0,0.0,0.1722089233938241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084364600732077,0.06283205649744189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201308333730133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057918317581002174,0.0650056199247812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851165832761637,0.08159308748465571,0.05925580764761922,0.07463121225962895,0.0,0.0,0.1615981106042728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091042986069676,0.0,0.0,0.05475581498530364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865026428532794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209956245339146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790835775568872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19279384717839854,0.06869948613939883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17035221536888182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983965007079748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580301563563075,0.0,0.0,0.0889797939578388,0.10281278621572128,0.0,0.0,0.0705236902800908,0.15124152715751366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923378109505681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18667479903576828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05504143021269502
mentalhealth,the---chosen---one,2020/03/02,"People I consider close often belittle and insult me, and it’s starting to get to my head. I need advice. I’m not sure if I’m over reacting to these remarks or if I’m justified in being upset.

It seems that my close friends and family, including my girlfriend, often mock me. They will call me stupid, idiot, dumbass, etc. I get the sense that a lot of it might just be lighthearted and done out of love, but I’m not sure anymore.

What I don’t understand is why. Nobody else gets called those things (that I’m aware of) except for me. I know I’m not an idiot. I can take apart an entire engine and reassemble it, I can build and set up complex computer systems and servers, I have an eidetic memory and can remember lengthy numbers. You get the point, I consider myself to be reasonably bright. The only area I could improve is my short term memory which I believe ties into my ADHD. If I don’t pay extra attention to something my mind won’t hold on to it. 

Aside from that I’m always kind, understanding, and generous towards those people. I always go out of my way for them and I always try to do things to make them happy and their lives easier. Am I too nice? Do they see me as venerable, and as such, consider me an easy target? 

I’m not a machine, those comments fuck with me. I’m already struggling mentally, I don’t need more insecurity and instability.  

I just really need help right now. I don’t know what to do anymore. 

Thank you for taking the time to read this.",3.166530612244898,4.843323493197282,5.0813775510204096,80.45022959183675,74.27210884353741,8.573469387755104,26.195578231292515,9.188382445141503,2.2453088435374147,1153,41,226,27,24,396,163,294,0.11699999999999999,0.7290000000000001,0.155,0.9518,0,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,0,2,5,0,7,18,6,3,10,0,22,3,1,3,2,54,52,20,0,7,12,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,19,19,0,1,9,1,1,1,9,9,0,0,1,2,40,9,30,44,5,23,0,0,2,2,15,15,1,9,4,154,59,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414257576330827,0.11499331126949215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986029617509345,0.0,0.2937518833928474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334093652150595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13258249879810355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24032422949891455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395608817508204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204251698752999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830463946110052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124177047656235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093608641861737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091751869974048,0.10879116086030856,0.24592701812321946,0.0,0.06687896320546775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527012685251065,0.0,0.0,0.1207712962423856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788768987677975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254324222458605,0.1293452006372601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391158744740736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004539390449543,0.10620874158117287,0.0,0.07855079545929662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859146906495345,0.12483747014860926,0.11882095646345922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617696267928015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949921289651641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631658355122486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11124348726603807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770957062220935,0.0,0.07538736417501289,0.12099230086599667,0.0,0.0,0.13330592292958202,0.10049613447597217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377391132424337,0.10712938150008637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059406219444552,0.0,0.0,0.08329289969265867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302230911814352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218197269833803,0.0,0.17695800859191144,0.0,0.0,0.10834183900906487,0.0,0.0,0.15635970354906292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861882799572729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989545094964008,0.0,0.0,0.2450133244521192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340710094231118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618584353672944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kaitsuwu,2020/03/02,"so uhh i really nees help, due to my social anxiety and daily panic attacks its hard basically im 14yo dude, ive been struggling with depression and selfharm since i was 10. my first suicide attempt was when i was about 11.  ive been to therapy for couple of years, still i cant talk to her because it makes me anxious and ruin my routines. i really need help because i cant continue like this. also i vent thru a breakup/lost my first friend. he doesnt want to be my friend, but a mutual. im also trans (ftm), and haha my moms a fucking ex-alcoholic and drug addict. havent seen her in a year. i cant talk to my dad or therapist or anyone no matter how hard i try. last time it lead to me going to an """"""open ward"""""" and me living for a while in my foster care. rn idk when im permanently going backnto home, but i see my dad evey other weekend and every tuesday to wednesday. fuck this just sucks, i need some fucking help",1.6954343188052443,3.375930222797926,4.1226211520877785,85.72627247790308,78.37823834196891,7.028223102712588,23.78817433709235,7.928766900206844,1.297719536726607,715,24,150,12,17,250,118,193,0.174,0.716,0.11,-0.7664,0,0,2,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,0,4,9,14,5,2,6,1,13,5,0,3,0,22,26,18,1,3,5,3,2,1,2,0,2,0,1,0,6,9,0,0,0,1,0,3,6,9,0,2,6,4,27,5,16,19,1,21,0,2,2,3,14,3,4,3,16,90,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906035210643488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652072613009718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893496191276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056646605066984,0.13374469802998218,0.0,0.08277961492237945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346833965710521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443364042614318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070441628722532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13099402696701962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196737725239743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372924489604558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974696309383624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014014781355367,0.0,0.0,0.1829324898432328,0.3283432865370651,0.0,0.0,0.13456521286854142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21210471841209952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380588640516925,0.0,0.11875277755261054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3836379397623461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965019891687028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783837769157714,0.0,0.10453873844761732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129234444320517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902488320205693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386545489709886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556634584616346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389027640115454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168471850621465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943398771007778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793174464852726,0.0,0.0,0.12068161719576885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945447785071595,0.0,0.0,0.1237648015206451,0.0,0.12949721408710907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19031151703929886,0.0,0.0,0.13538695090863068,0.13745754736266785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903297205480571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037765426503693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982828666841079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247593064285395
mentalhealth,anxiousasamofo,2020/03/02,"How to calm down when you feel a panic attack coming on? Does anybody have some advice for quick waysto calm yourself down before, during and after a panic attack?",6.6370000000000005,7.902060033333335,6.38666666666667,75.99000000000002,65.33333333333334,6.0,21.66666666666667,3.1291,0.4266666666666668,131,2,19,0,2,41,25,30,0.331,0.5529999999999999,0.11599999999999999,-0.8611,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,3,6,2,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,2,6,3,1,7,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,3,15,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599990538577498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6053826476934699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264046922914573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291944490439628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328383328931835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345322254865101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6243481022168113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carbon_666,2020/03/02,"Tips for an anti social extrovert to improve at one on one conversations? I sit alone everyday in college, I am usually one of the people who answers questions in class, but no one seems to talk to me.

Please Help, I am lonely :(.",4.957424242424242,5.96855140909091,6.4890909090909075,74.66196969696973,69.0,9.503030303030306,32.84848484848485,9.725611199111238,3.3163575757575767,178,8,32,4,3,61,35,44,0.175,0.665,0.16,0.0644,0,3,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,4,0,9,3,0,7,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,2,2,24,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26276126872883515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17005272671635258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6876667311371194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758867023758909,0.0,0.0,0.2784912701822536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842070164760485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309629780090144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586197092525401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20391800486179967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794195785793293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spyderellia,2020/03/02,"I’m loved but I never belonged So I’m not 100% if this is the right place for this, but like I need to say it somehow.

I want to preface this by saying I feel loved and welcomed, I am usually happy and can make friends wherever. But I have never felt like I belonged. Even at home growing up, my family is close and we talk and we share but I still feel like an outsider.

And I don’t know why. I know people care about me, and I care about them, but I constantly feel like I’m a guests (not over staying my welcome) but still just a guest. This makes it so I never full relax. Even when I try to make my own apartment my space it just isn’t where I belong. I am 23 years old now and have not once felt like “this is my place, these are my people”.

I love my friends and family dearly. I would do whatever it takes to make them feel loved and happy and they would do the same for me.
Which is why I feel guilty— but I can’t help but feeling like this isn’t my place.

I don’t even know if I’ll ever have a place, a community, I connect with. I’m envious when I see other have it. I don’t want to invalidate my own feelings because I do know I have such great people in my lives, but I also feel like I shouldn’t be like this. But I am.

And that’s the main problem, that’s what gets he depressed and anxious. That under lying feeling of staying separated and alone.",0.7370596868884541,2.5254958664383587,2.6613894324853256,94.55616438356165,81.77397260273972,5.541291585127202,20.360078277886494,6.5431188927421005,0.06458180039138918,1051,29,246,10,28,351,130,292,0.071,0.631,0.298,0.9975,0,1,0,0,0,0,31.0,2,0,3,0,19,27,1,0,8,0,27,4,0,4,4,66,62,30,0,9,17,0,11,8,4,3,0,2,1,0,19,17,0,0,15,1,0,1,13,3,0,0,2,14,46,24,17,56,5,31,0,1,1,4,21,15,0,3,21,170,65,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372989242552169,0.0,0.06465083242549746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133058835791212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04928168711296082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16485147477680698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736352855638528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06963072701160057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018988760356218,0.07312793007285769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524248557429337,0.0,0.3678939147766258,0.23101957468496126,0.15524563155489815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491958315547487,0.0,0.042237597646169016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913067799002905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17211965583805314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054187957698288894,0.0,0.08109301679072793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17771875847304572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31596994225847785,0.0,0.07138663909110213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918590809677594,0.0,0.215855706702966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059944722662517214,0.18705538361018567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483206682373988,0.08609610812042978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814092967648592,0.0,0.3378586478561297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735668787516167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904024332722371,0.0,0.12858061789824127,0.0,0.0,0.06442211622695983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233766770176892,0.1291240755621079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06078454676685875,0.06497925928469156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05488769695535155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903812715326724,0.0,0.09536764596113173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589807884471648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485836483847699,0.0,0.0,0.052060816844157295
mentalhealth,hopefuleagle7183,2020/03/02,"Struggling with Reality Hi there,
I'm going through a very difficult time. I'm unsure whether my relationships with other people are truly genuine and in a way real. I hope this makes sense? I'm feeling very alone right now and don't know who to turn to for help. Has anyone else ever felt this way? Sort of like you're living in a dreamworld or that you don't mean to other people what they mean to you? 

Also, I want to encourage you, that no matter how dark it may seem, there is still hope, so don't give up! I'm rooting for you, I'm in your corner! 

Please share your experiences, if you feel comfortable.",3.745528455284554,4.932229406504064,4.801788617886178,84.97796747967482,72.00813008130079,7.417886178861789,24.235772357723576,7.793537801064563,1.119416260162601,479,13,98,6,9,157,83,123,0.09,0.6859999999999999,0.22399999999999998,0.9427,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,7,1,0,8,8,0,1,3,0,7,0,0,3,1,25,26,8,0,4,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,7,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,1,3,11,6,15,24,0,13,0,0,0,0,15,6,0,7,5,59,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17310284260723371,0.0,0.13365887075195054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686561507525955,0.17125093163838706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962096564364854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118438830976208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16349141151646376,0.0,0.0,0.16901831082710847,0.0,0.1604770969245676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603324070026782,0.09498743370793207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202796565155024,0.0,0.0,0.3320081954171261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918537614976547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165437336498113,0.0,0.14758445034237075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11156480481720836,0.0,0.0,0.3641209440193673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317425875234255,0.0,0.0,0.18346551127212224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19023774577649424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794418801827526,0.0,0.14273352118382426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215464677806606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334752970614058,0.0,0.0,0.17472719180851504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745854395702204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817963435643513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758099689468249,0.09858134371375504,0.2653300943481888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blueribbonbitch,2020/03/02,How to not be SAD? I recently was diagnosed with Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) and am trying to find ways to cope. What helps motivate you to get out of bed in the morning? This is what I struggle with the most. Any advice is much appreciated!,2.7112765957446814,5.321636297872342,4.897276595744682,76.69400000000002,79.63829787234042,9.71744680851064,28.54893617021277,9.888512548439397,3.5575310638297872,194,9,36,7,5,67,38,47,0.08900000000000001,0.693,0.218,0.8046,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,1,3,0,1,2,0,5,1,0,3,0,10,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,9,4,2,5,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,27,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3254070111390041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264536912944516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3379913818129017,0.0,0.0,0.3816506792525545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043590211368405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17398050165339404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22320512030296052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24479577175352235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32880062576839125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3481273951641947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260874098685314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643225523401434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dave30954,2020/03/02,"I am an extrovert to the point where my ""recharging"" is done with people. Is that bad? Hi guys. I just had a question

So I am an extrovert, and it is to the point where I need time socializing in order to ""recharge"" me before I can spend time alone (studying, etc). This has always been the case.

Recently, however, it's kind of intensified, probably because my schedule is diverging from my friends' (intro classes are ending). The question I had was: Where is the line between this need to ""recharge"" with social interaction and just plain loneliness?

Any input is appreciated, thanks",4.947904761904759,7.310493504761907,5.592380952380953,75.74761904761905,71.09523809523809,8.857142857142858,32.61904761904762,9.444778638647367,3.3911904761904754,458,22,78,11,9,148,70,105,0.076,0.835,0.08900000000000001,0.3313,1,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,8,0,16,0,0,0,0,10,19,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,10,3,10,14,1,12,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,2,5,58,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19058053446817516,0.0,0.0,0.15311240159276984,0.0,0.0,0.12513420581590262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536420093941358,0.11217177040846933,0.0,0.1565803282519634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883077659845916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629796702085497,0.0,0.20522158804421972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216691454899907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18220042560402744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916197768598996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27288455658129623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275704821597386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34790090126664763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983956398368023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4122702357287473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816892669848369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751533294978671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941316908736873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21459730084228248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dancingdanish,2020/03/02,"Increasingly feeling out of emotional control? Over the last year or so I (26f) have struggled with an increasing amount what I call 'bad days'...these are days when I feel so overwhelmingly pessimistic that nothing good can reach me. I am needlessly mean to my husband, all those who work around me and find myself not caring about others or my life at all, which is very different than how I normally am. I think about walking away from all my responsibilities when the day before I was happy and cheerful and loving my life. I feel like I try and be happy but there is this intense haze that makes it impossible. 

I used to only get these days every few months, then it increased to once a month a week or so before my period (i am on birth control and have been for years) now I get them randomly at least four or five days out of the month, with no correlation to my cycle. I am scared because I feel I am absoloutely not myself and have to fake my way through the day without yelling or being irritated at people when I just want to be left alone. I have no history of mental health issues. Is this normal? Is it part of getting older and does it get worse? Should I be seeking help? 

Thanks!",5.427557471264368,6.160447905172418,5.8532068965517245,80.64581609195403,67.79310344827586,8.772873563218392,28.82873563218391,8.841846274778883,2.10171632183908,942,31,184,15,15,303,142,232,0.15,0.743,0.107,-0.9146,1,1,0,0,1,0,23.0,0,0,1,3,13,13,0,3,7,0,22,4,0,5,3,42,38,21,0,4,10,1,4,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,14,12,0,2,7,0,0,4,5,5,0,2,2,5,30,8,28,31,10,35,0,1,0,1,6,10,0,6,21,137,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712936354109944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100675992962911,0.0,0.0,0.10625380036611404,0.0,0.09442722376516308,0.06893992669233671,0.0,0.1924661848849155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547973251786135,0.0,0.11530498702476212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536849316785111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3646754135308627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815722928775267,0.0,0.0,0.0989677050712916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272134501656511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952850163984551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287311620744424,0.08079305659103267,0.0,0.0,0.10336417886538768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363439286250817,0.0,0.0,0.09485633218751403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240777399292098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021167004925642,0.0,0.0,0.07580328617331379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803882530889673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218519877916552,0.0,0.0,0.122874954971827,0.0,0.15976066417678078,0.05525111337592715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207008335718304,0.0,0.07548989020056987,0.0,0.0,0.1231905085514481,0.0,0.0,0.11397029051190948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27080723232205944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22161259610555764,0.10851497076926857,0.0,0.0,0.1204394518538496,0.0,0.08601167836799843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224677807838457,0.0,0.07840385915433852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322497408578325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182284730949863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412005993192222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246488508359851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767821482194746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097675309225606,0.0,0.09331287006745556,0.0667046818660156,0.08976728692381544,0.0907157034006494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901679964196682,0.0,0.08233243419391577,0.0,0.11525056548437465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14565527712363835
mentalhealth,Robw_1973,2020/03/02,"I feel so lost. I feel so lost. Everything just feels like it’s sloppy away. I’m usually good at writing how I feel, but I just feel so numb, so lost and so alone right now.",-1.2689473684210526,0.7308784210526333,1.0371578947368434,101.16310526315792,93.73684210526315,5.145263157894737,15.494736842105262,6.742157984588678,-0.487701052631579,132,3,34,2,5,44,24,38,0.32899999999999996,0.584,0.086,-0.8859,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,3,9,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,11,9,8,0,0,3,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,3,5,4,2,2,6,0,5,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21468221441319474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19474878427398626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18629219528183874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.524041441177711,0.14808269910975255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17385877315028367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012677864007728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6788201861155531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17701816987640578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282924502915115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,4-ph,2020/03/02,"How to start a conversation with an old friend I ran into an old high school friend yesterday and dealing with depression/ anxiety myself I could tell that he’s battling with it. I haven’t talked to him in years, so we practically have no relationship anymore. I want to figure out a way to let him know that he can talk to me if he needs but I don’t know how to create that conversation. Also he lives a couple states over now so I won’t be able to do it in person. How should I bring up the conversation and let him know he can talk to me.",3.4304646017699127,4.323073318584072,4.955918141592921,84.68927544247789,72.45132743362831,8.481858407079647,23.85951327433629,8.841846274778883,1.3700628318584065,427,11,95,8,8,144,67,113,0.043,0.88,0.077,0.5423,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,0,0,7,4,1,0,6,0,12,0,0,3,0,21,20,10,0,5,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,1,0,14,2,17,13,0,17,0,1,0,0,21,7,0,1,6,66,19,1,0.1704374759116917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13629878790921585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13038420256455793,0.0,0.16902817818843546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608045589184842,0.1885858253236848,0.0,0.0,0.1757135537805009,0.14679754825826016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263359142201868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800765509674677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810039383079965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485677332239843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15049941378933449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637722878310378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3576909205997862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14881942988617944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18298606468439724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249182484519968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206365226871696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4109735612429265,0.14896986628266062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052843917544856,0.13528533516720678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975614647498062
mentalhealth,TerribleNameAmirite,2020/03/02,"I feel like I get overly attached to anyone who shows me fondness A while back I was kicked out of a friend group because of some arguments and now every time someone is friendly to me I can't help but feel like I must cling on as hard as I can so I won't be alone, I'm worried that I will grow increasingly controlling over them and appear overbearing. It's even worse as I realize that the majority of these few people don't even care that much in the first place, I'm just someone they talk to sometimes while I worry about angering them, or saying the wrong thing, or revealing too much of myself etc, and distancing them as a result. I feel so conflicted, can someone give some advice?",7.1988819875776375,6.132580710144932,7.404368530020705,77.09021739130436,64.36231884057972,10.784265010351968,33.4824016563147,9.957137785484203,3.0263010351966875,550,19,109,10,7,179,92,138,0.192,0.7120000000000001,0.096,-0.9415,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,4,2,9,8,1,0,6,0,10,0,0,2,1,20,19,14,0,1,4,0,4,2,2,3,0,1,0,0,7,4,0,2,5,1,0,3,3,2,0,1,1,5,18,6,17,14,8,15,0,0,0,0,12,6,0,5,8,81,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465982908740575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16392021808418214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066621911660106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12170003120131966,0.0,0.09648005825755283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16136703938172342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775135118480387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17651313425930282,0.2090719777624105,0.0,0.13334948808723818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24007853903817344,0.2261365562947449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346245698935294,0.0,0.0,0.2445583616633075,0.0,0.08268965857887073,0.1518272185828483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417790313803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060851935447188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464567176270744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23269364779941185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972464378422962,0.0,0.16535869578318824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125862832954352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4023055362220965,0.0,0.15653329641560176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721160919166072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514770276673982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228863916377024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214621859123649,0.16129087751676413,0.0,0.17304364196910774,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,julia_brbu,2020/03/02,"In need of therapy, but too broke to afford it lol ok so lately i feel like i fell into a big whole of saddness but i cant explain it and i find it really hard to express my  feelings. i always stay in my room at home and cant stand my parents coming into my room but at the same time id really freaking love to be with them (idk if it makes sense)
 i barely ever told my parents i love them and i really want to but i cant seem to get those words out even tho i really am grateful for them
 ive wanted to get therapy for quite some time since i hate talking to people ab my feelings (as i said earlier) but that ruined many of my relationships with people around me and i feel like im really hurting my parents.
 i talked ab it with my dad and he tried finding a way but we're your typical family that lives on one salary (my mom is stuck in bed bc of her illness), as yall.know, therapy is hella.expensive. My dad is a sculptor so his salary is pretty small, having to buy food for 3 people, and the many expensive pills my mom needs, so i gave up on the idea of seeking proffesional help but so far i couldnt deal with my emotions myself.
   So, the whole point of this long ass thread is basically to ask if anyone knows any therapy sites  or anything that could help that is free or smth convenient.
     


     ****(also good to know that the coin valute here is ron so like  4,32 ron= 1 USD)******",0.13437499999999858,2.4277303541666697,2.5258333333333347,91.2025,89.20833333333334,5.838888888888889,18.76388888888889,7.2793139503082624,0.4897180555555556,1074,31,233,19,36,366,161,288,0.094,0.733,0.17300000000000001,0.981,6,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,3,1,13,13,1,0,8,2,16,6,1,1,1,48,40,27,0,8,11,7,5,3,0,0,2,1,4,0,12,15,1,0,11,0,4,2,4,5,0,1,4,6,38,9,37,33,4,29,0,3,0,3,28,19,1,6,8,144,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247928591983742,0.07541402941875819,0.0,0.0,0.061633640257256886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337279584650231,0.0,0.07458334828417608,0.08068270616415422,0.08472974735858202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807242124816748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236318401640181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343878327759172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195007883979584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059862331385884274,0.08198286013694353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854408542489626,0.0,0.18330734663860196,0.12949666058798395,0.0,0.0,0.16567408824797974,0.0,0.10959394751524458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470414537636733,0.0,0.0,0.07601877421277645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811894874759552,0.08948145772375671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149896086650787,0.0,0.09091242493823344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970246463467202,0.10231377836619096,0.09789933934149088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149428803451953,0.0,0.1022381248351568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328363162227133,0.0,0.08003071934924777,0.08020747308628415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163599887148711,0.0,0.06049832189547581,0.18377554844840907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122968664052525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344066435107007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061415358392775676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019121146482255,0.0,0.0,0.1885008136730968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08567760850854023,0.0,0.0,0.09220648226509773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639949613051894,0.0,0.0,0.2903095377993153,0.0,0.0,0.09730606929857764,0.0,0.0,0.08621286688393824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250900285044029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497266647498098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660286359428363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14569496279825114,0.0,0.0,0.4145875579758717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569782062428447,0.0,0.0,0.08660384521329703,0.0,0.06153394986356519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691554338583616,0.07194036453850246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202377318753114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SantiagoCFlores,2020/03/02,"I discovered that my girlfriend has a dissociative personality disorder (multiple) Descubri que mi novia tiene trastorno de personalidad disoaciva (multiple) Necesito ayuda, piensa mucho en suicidarse y  pareciera que mi novia que conocí está siendo rehen de su parte ""mala""
Perdón si tengo mala ortografía, no hablo ingles como lengua madre.

Estoy Desesperado😕

I discovered that my girlfriend has a dissociative personality disorder (multiple). I need help, she thinks a lot about killing herself and it seems that my girlfriend I met is being hostage on her ""bad"" side.
Sorry if I have bad spelling, I don't speak English as a mother tongue.",6.538276157804461,10.028840254716982,6.981389365351628,62.17295883361922,70.98113207547169,9.89228130360206,36.05145797598628,10.018931242160765,4.954407547169812,521,28,69,16,11,169,78,106,0.159,0.815,0.026000000000000002,-0.9201,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,4,0,6,0,0,0,0,6,10,3,1,2,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,12,0,3,8,3,2,0,0,0,0,12,2,0,3,0,35,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3968876776044241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5447789445535705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593046422657267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629457353108501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20205783867349672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17622868631884325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573725624802302,0.0,0.0,0.4150471232847127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163650962781934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26605119002195315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228881461254729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustAveragePopcorn,2020/03/02,"I haven’t been properly diagnosed for anything but I’m pretty sure something’s wrong I don’t know what triggers people but i’m describing my experiences recently so i dunno if it’ll be a bad thing to read for others. Rest assured, theres nothing visceral/traumatic in it.







I’m pretty sure it’s not normal to feel scared when your groupmates chat you personally because you havent been online this entire weekend because you just ”didnt feel like” opening messenger but actually was avoiding everything because you have an irrational fear of disappointing everyone and the only solution you thought of was to ignore everything and just read manga the entire time.

I’m also sure that crying after being messaged and overall kind of feeling of dread up till now isn’t something you should be feeling and doing when there’s a simple solution such as looking at the message and replying to it right there in front of you and yet choosing not to isn’t something someone with a normal brain would do.

Plus i think not everyone is wishing that violent and debilitating accidents/illnesses happen to them just so that they can explain why they couldn’t reply to said groupmates before now.

Aside from that, i’d be surprised if anyone could get to work if everyone fell asleep/felt like they had to punch something whenever they tried to work or daydream an entire life based on something interesting they heard from what they were listening to or somehow lack the innate talent of organizing ideas into something coherent, whether orally or written.

I don’t know what to believe anymore. Every introduction i gave when school started felt like a lie while they were leaving my mouth. Smiling makes me feel happy and ive been using that to hide my sadness for a while now.  Now i dont know if i’m sad or not, except for the times that i just cry.

I dont even know why i’m still typing out my screams of help inside my notes when i know no one will read them if i dont show it to someone.",7.245693907156673,7.598133226063832,7.331837524177952,72.9377272727273,63.81382978723404,10.027852998065764,36.23984526112186,9.800150414767053,3.635871276595745,1607,72,273,30,22,518,200,376,0.182,0.6970000000000001,0.121,-0.9811,1,1,6,0,0,0,18.0,0,8,9,2,23,24,1,4,12,0,34,4,2,3,4,70,66,33,0,13,22,0,6,3,0,4,2,4,0,1,17,13,0,2,16,6,0,2,16,12,0,1,15,11,35,12,40,41,2,30,0,3,1,0,27,9,0,11,22,190,52,7,0.0,0.0,0.08150170542712168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667894660662108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828276020977485,0.05839786007814968,0.0,0.06872835384774349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697341997770378,0.1527357396167999,0.0,0.07106782796276892,0.09409639964922896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932339207415196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668247847601418,0.0,0.18348161917483846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476920442198088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2936480886769626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055162976566350136,0.0,0.07036767686629357,0.2394156278308646,0.1501215270961217,0.0816968153341697,0.0,0.09398118276330586,0.21114653056783156,0.05966541135349096,0.1603811188759578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04363480699120115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385485925944348,0.08890666586676264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055980482015569114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942818702139588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697134236575313,0.22949706413376605,0.0,0.0,0.088433703734825,0.0,0.0,0.05899136725613462,0.1224083063474152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07013424468870351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055749040101879116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636601864772219,0.08013795544008519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05659408675542407,0.06351934668109073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05790099676293215,0.0729248617309513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993604835292303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506223724898972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246413654199293,0.0,0.0,0.07132407760132663,0.0794449238032512,0.0,0.08361627767733727,0.08452486672053723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152938207945376,0.3857782962022851,0.0,0.0,0.059114604480027026,0.0,0.06669773411676135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23614471596393202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055485774093729935,0.053515083592916624,0.0,0.06630411348734835,0.09740025600784667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0567033684752081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721329003991669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507243514204382,0.0,0.09604179631665304,0.0,0.0,0.12160447348292168,0.0,0.0,0.05932892565335667,0.09131402944631252,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xxeminex,2020/03/02,"Feeling out of control Everything irritates me ... I feel annoyed 90% of the time and 85% of the time I don’t even know why. I spend time trying to justify why I feel so annoyed but I always come to the conclusion that I am crazy. And the worst part is I take it out on my fiancé who is the most understanding and patient person. I feel scared of myself... like I don’t know how I’m going to react to something and I feel like I can’t control it. I’ve never experienced this until the last month. And I do think a lot of the reason is because I moved to my fiancé’s country to stay with him while we wait for his visa to process to come to the USA. We live with his family and it’s so much harder than I thought it would be. But I feel like a beast because they are amazing people but for some reason little things make me so upset or angry and I never used to be like that. I am generally very laid back and understanding and now I don’t even like who I am anymore. But I don’t know what to do. I feel like there’s no solution. My fiancé is so good to me, always comforting me telling me that it’s normal because it’s not easy living in another country and trying to adjust. And I’ll feel better but then the next hour I feel so irritated again like I’m going to have a mental breakdown and I just want to shut the world out so I don’t hurt anyone, especially him. I don’t know what to do and I feel like I’m at my breaking point or close 
Has anyone else experienced this ??",1.8884615384615413,3.3212312611465014,4.001528662420384,87.88392944634985,77.1528662420382,6.741597256246938,22.586477217050465,7.468242284971852,0.7865545320921115,1152,33,254,15,26,396,144,314,0.13,0.722,0.14800000000000002,0.6188,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,2,0,1,4,14,18,2,2,13,0,23,0,0,8,2,70,53,30,0,3,9,0,10,8,0,1,0,0,0,1,16,23,0,3,22,0,2,5,11,6,0,0,1,12,43,12,33,49,6,33,0,1,0,0,11,11,0,5,23,174,59,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14928273313242274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406303571229564,0.0,0.0,0.08896280317140008,0.12544700559198282,0.09191290596912684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897725709130256,0.0,0.16404917197448288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933637927483787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15454504309105774,0.0,0.0,0.2012225473248585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493663575285778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849801038135235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062065983197958,0.0,0.08456546044389934,0.0,0.4535731269163619,0.25633977620730963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196231902645968,0.0752399153799696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834090609009694,0.0,0.09603056950728596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971970852987076,0.07312117594552195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506008717972389,0.08990751916914712,0.1584215113698444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626359531829591,0.0,0.0,0.059878479588542574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040108146913324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160131107155737,0.09534173370754624,0.06594316126847058,0.0,0.1383713486570592,0.0,0.0954018000626771,0.0,0.08789140689709461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714127934794974,0.0,0.06218983585169643,0.07832654762618724,0.0,0.0,0.0847997890112952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844624227014864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898098974802543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905894042491519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561310817709888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744665310862782,0.0,0.07840572521464265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059595712956749286,0.05747904958976322,0.0,0.07121538772386465,0.15692232271515166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12180699382947448,0.0,0.0,0.18677118750158805,0.0,0.07747592418310183,0.0,0.07401564329789266,0.05291006412861743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16188879635473435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372353420350522,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MunchyYT,2020/03/02,"Please help I have been posting in this subreddit a lot. I want to kill myself. I don’t want to die I just want school to end. I hate going there. It causes me mental pain every time I have to get out of bed, hours and hours before I would on a weekend. It never get enough sleep. I want it to end. I hate school. I wish it would just end. It has caused me severe depression for a few years. It is causing so much more harm that good. I don’t remember a single thing I’ve been taught this year. I cant Stand it anymore. I want to kill myself because I want it to end and I’m too afraid to tell anyone.",-0.7613645038167931,1.2771718091603077,1.3848043893129791,99.71705391221373,90.45038167938931,4.191030534351145,14.294370229007633,5.602791699666715,-1.066584351145038,461,8,112,3,16,153,76,131,0.242,0.627,0.131,-0.9741,0,0,0,0,0,5,15.0,0,0,0,0,5,9,4,1,4,0,11,2,1,3,1,20,25,3,3,9,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,12,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,8,0,0,3,0,18,1,13,20,6,17,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,11,72,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135273688095944,0.08004282667701912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978223926455215,0.0,0.09740887471430723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3527887481107277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859621975503224,0.0,0.11880585609900385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4055596626615109,0.11828216040678398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644921501465546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961579716818142,0.0,0.06505816692003548,0.09601529311174532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260385932392149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672945572443582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22546750482539554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532968640274679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732163335461566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536278703987428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415150290816091,0.0,0.08828934437579118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12180832213770047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12565798854101107,0.0,0.0,0.1096343720674382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967663626509526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317074374902153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129322946155551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11455659192755613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005525192452597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605138600765972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06675066346181414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4051181044169189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163935880588531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263797703033395,0.0,0.0,0.14743490290824773
mentalhealth,b_rock01,2020/03/02,"Dealing with anxiety and depression for the first time. I’m a 23 year old male who graduated with an undergraduate degree in entrepreneurship last spring. I live in and have grown up in the US. I’ve been a really genuinely happy individual for all of my life, and have always had a go with the flow disposition. I started my first very well paying salary job halfway across the country as a project manager for a large company in September (not in an industry I thought I would ever really go into), and have been going through 6 months of training with a deadline on March 9. I have also been assigned a customer and often travel for work to their site. This customer is on an expedited timeline and I joined mid install due to someone else in my role quitting. I had a week transition period. This customer deadline is April 1, less than a month away from my training requirements’ deadline, which is almost unheard of for new hires.

Recently, I have been extremely overwhelmed with the customer work that has been given to me. Many of the people involved in the project also seem overwhelmed and exhausted, and all of the people that I’m assigning tasks to that have been here for 15+ years say they’ve never been this busy in such a short amount of time. I have tasks coming in faster than I can complete them, which often means I need to work 10+ hours a day, 5 days a week. While all this is going on, I’m still expected to be completing my training requirements, so that means I’m expected to be working on weekends as well.

I think it’s worth mentioning that this company has a reputation of hiring people fresh out of college and burning them out quickly. The benefits and pay are usually great enough to justify sticking around for most people. My role and app that I’m on is notorious for being one of the most difficult, and we’ve been bleeding quite a few people over these past 6 months.

All of this has lead up to me experiencing severe anxiety and some depression. I often cannot sleep at night because I’m constantly thinking about what needs to get done or what I didn’t get to. I struggle to get out of bed every morning and face the endless list of tasks, just to work my ass of in doing them but still being told by my superiors that it isn’t enough. My days consist of getting ready for work, heading to work early, staying late, coming home, maybe eat if I can, reading for an hour, trying to sleep early so I can catch back up on sleep, even though I still wake up usually after my first REM cycle and being unable to fall back asleep. I feel isolated and lonely most days.

On the weekends I sometimes see the two friends I have here, but it’s mostly spent with me being inside playing games talking with longtime friends, watching something on streaming services, or reading. My enjoyment of these activities has also been getting less and less each weekend. 

I feel like I’ve done everything I can to help: I’ve stopped drinking, stopped smoking, tried to go to sleep on a regular schedule, bought a weighted blanket, read before bed to clear my thoughts, drink lots of water and tea, stay away from caffeine, and I just started seeing a therapist, but I’m still feeling anxious and depressed.

I have breakdowns often, especially on Sundays. I feel like a failure because I can’t get ahead. My motivation extremely lacking because this job loop just isn’t satisfying to me, and I don’t enjoy the industry I’m in. I have reached out to my superiors for help multiple times with little to no success, and it’s hurt my faith in the company as a whole. I feel like a failure. I want to quit at the end of this project, but the money and benefits will likely not be matched by anything else I can realistically obtain. Plus, how do I know the next job won’t be worse? My current thoughts on what to do are to start applying to other jobs and quit once this project wraps up in April.",8.838735676088616,7.261738526737973,8.630686019862491,71.24968449197861,61.45989304812835,11.596699770817418,40.22169595110772,10.41944937434414,4.1433563330786845,3110,141,566,57,35,1007,341,748,0.076,0.8079999999999999,0.115,0.9833,6,2,3,0,0,0,72.0,1,0,4,21,30,29,0,3,42,0,59,18,9,3,7,100,106,43,0,8,12,0,6,4,2,3,3,1,3,1,29,42,6,4,15,11,6,13,11,10,2,5,21,11,58,19,118,74,20,123,1,7,3,1,20,45,1,15,67,394,87,33,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05674747343443759,0.0,0.0,0.13595850341966684,0.04715452351430528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670578964625496,0.06402170780960795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04663511918867196,0.05044889650292395,0.0,0.0,0.10648788891880502,0.08715246896180187,0.0,0.10363771315080447,0.0,0.0482225521487967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976335000778979,0.11883620400838064,0.06124084382917142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461915330790498,0.0584249553719686,0.1464310524915525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598750834910845,0.0,0.11103133139944964,0.0,0.05798822638806845,0.09468211838154236,0.0,0.050193378271493866,0.11711186819922688,0.0,0.03743043217174507,0.05126185055874928,0.047747469770037236,0.0,0.050931929232748085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327192589421642,0.1214565785792881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446120867840976,0.0,0.0,0.08756721265318547,0.0,0.17764846479379248,0.0,0.16103619183610868,0.0,0.0,0.06247959556318295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06032696445122316,0.0,0.0,0.058160439988382724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597028896745753,0.0,0.05684528611630092,0.0,0.1116183565531402,0.0,0.06066710667611625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22494751674588528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031144709105177738,0.04619414634454997,0.06392696556270637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04002815852664108,0.1107456750449068,0.05679888273500014,0.050041225306576564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04817936305509659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745514785150405,0.056933288507462015,0.12346191049427473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13570192489377195,0.0,0.0,0.08404114301745191,0.04370790162427901,0.05473287030015319,0.06026988292573671,0.05318156934669967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059466317831993985,0.060352396461410225,0.0384015014685223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054098551196366765,0.1964414782263044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24110486295925534,0.17005796819034144,0.0,0.07260934355102824,0.0,0.0559554335456126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04506677826710235,0.0,0.0,0.09031834735140454,0.051590834557438695,0.0,0.06402170780960795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22684632152530604,0.0,0.048016860818434384,0.04362783775201933,0.05604872538932158,0.0,0.12033534071649125,0.12080675274918586,0.18102902840014054,0.09475840776169067,0.0,0.059244471569950274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04554972464763371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579899661895583,0.0,0.07262453302100581,0.05567862934400434,0.1349705061479474,0.0991353413904491,0.0,0.0,0.05415123799927723,0.0,0.07695130755200924,0.0,0.05535899391428648,0.0,0.06816781850274135,0.0,0.12482943695013135,0.04675922417927488,0.03342581972803406,0.0,0.0909155598541808,0.06900958881601979,0.10190744676033413,0.0,0.0,0.06327076082167331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887983749123769,0.0,0.05775223743923391,0.04025720629522958,0.0,0.0,0.072988085684163
mentalhealth,askallthemquestions,2020/03/02,"I’m afraid I’ll kill myself if my boyfriend doesn’t take me back We’ve been together over 6 years, I’m 25F, he’s 26M. I’ve had trust issues and I annoy him with it. I didn’t go to enough therapy to fix it. We went to a party Friday night and I got very drunk and blacked out at times (I don’t usually do this.) I don’t remember the following: We were on our way out and He went back for my stuff and accused him of wanting to go back into talk to this chick. I have no reason to distrust him. He said I kept accusing him and wouldn’t listen to reason and then attached him. He said I punched and kicked and scratched his arm. He showed me pics of the scratches. He says he can’t and won’t be with me. 

I’m hopeful in time he may consider having me in his life. We had no history of violence, ive apologized so much and tried to talk it out but he didn’t want to hear it. How could I do this to him? We had plans of getting married next year, we hang out every day, play DnD together twice a week, all of my friends are his friends, his family is basically my family at this point. I have no idea how to go on without him.

I’m thinking I may try to talk in a week because I know he told our DnD groups “I just couldn’t make it” as opposed to, “she attacked me and it’s done.” I dont feel like my life is worth it without him. I’m waiting to be matched with an online therapist but I’m scared I’ll just end it this weekend if he won’t take me back.",0.35889583333333164,1.9681179312500028,2.5456249999999976,95.81020833333336,82.1875,6.1416666666666675,21.916666666666664,7.1686216300943375,0.4440291666666672,1118,36,277,15,30,379,157,320,0.098,0.828,0.07400000000000001,-0.6769,1,0,0,0,0,1,29.0,7,0,0,1,9,12,4,2,6,0,31,4,1,5,1,55,61,21,1,8,8,0,3,1,2,5,2,5,0,1,14,25,1,3,7,4,1,7,16,6,0,1,15,9,47,6,39,37,3,39,0,0,1,0,45,14,0,5,18,169,61,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517469118732685,0.0,0.3384242525631156,0.0,0.06707309620374223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784977841755341,0.0,0.0,0.07096006702778804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125986053157868,0.12895401267110196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745367358779664,0.11369011381354112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270478485117332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074524557094266,0.0,0.05563433258015851,0.07860525412956522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17001737784490295,0.0,0.05748598751992371,0.0,0.1875972769571168,0.0,0.08800081868790588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240114914350651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928433891443268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12421016129549076,0.0,0.11484244131928305,0.0,0.0,0.12173158319419836,0.0,0.060469456722075626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543449075199134,0.05375496349692768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344569265977471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088450456355235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11701785574283988,0.1032554388343184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401365038214926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262577556762672,0.0,0.0,0.12464222402798016,0.0,0.20932692101495515,0.08750004981015769,0.11015894480732223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12595770530309378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16545731251648466,0.2653131638488774,0.0,0.0,0.12582857428785765,0.1277529857469267,0.0,0.07050260192901553,0.0,0.0,0.12831842942340738,0.0,0.0,0.10513811291625563,0.0,0.14940591501462344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118219197048362,0.09078604244842436,0.12979675954708025,0.08733647047030134,0.17651840938375293,0.0,0.0,0.2039973060194697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121294477971221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171106474620754
mentalhealth,Thrown_away_today2,2020/03/02,"My partner gets angry when i do something that sparks their anxiety. How to proceed going forward? My partner is currently in a job that cases them very high anxiety. To be fair to them they have tried therapy and medication. They recently came off the medication after a discussion we had. Neither felt it was making a difference other than the negative side-effects. 

The job will end in a few months and the agreement we came to was that once the job is done i will no longer give them any validation etc for their anxieties. 

The issue currently is that things happen that i don’t know will spike anxiety and they get really angry in the moment. I don’t know if anger or panic is the right word but it is very emotionally draining for me. The anger is never physical they just get really annoyed at me.",4.279713423831069,6.434420862745099,5.581699346405232,76.00687782805431,72.39869281045752,9.413574660633484,28.762694821518348,9.851270322608157,3.158240221216692,644,26,113,18,13,215,92,153,0.17,0.8059999999999999,0.024,-0.9598,5,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,2,0,9,0,3,5,3,1,13,0,18,2,0,2,1,18,30,8,0,1,4,0,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,2,9,7,0,0,3,0,0,4,6,4,0,0,7,1,19,1,13,19,3,21,0,0,0,0,15,8,0,2,11,87,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145441963370328,0.0,0.4115226633510116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30763005230463986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14050821353572393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376248591530313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512775369584959,0.1191138030870936,0.0,0.14998633753670154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291267012842169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21078860382455888,0.1290102776157888,0.07643093134918727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892465168992712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14209079858525064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036741189671414,0.4003668681604356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781889067091647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976978959330986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709590014646868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734465326552356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372313174985426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322214832910207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15778918479845394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17230908434254913,0.0,0.1327877246467452,0.0,0.0,0.11484946516580795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353313233871388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537953313473698,0.0,0.08934586598645612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130649510644713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219284381007116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hayakwq,2020/03/02,"Extreme paranoia My brother is experiencing extreme paranoia.
He leaves his pee and stool in weird places, wont shower and became religious and straight (he is flamboyant,gay and super outgoing) now he wants to get married..
I dont know how to deal with him, my parents are passive with him I'm the only one that questions him and trying to make him make sense? 
He was fine a week ago and he has a appointment with a psychiatrist in four days
How should I treat/ act around him ?",4.646972049689438,6.298242423913043,5.055279503105592,82.2276086956522,70.41304347826087,7.86583850931677,30.534161490683232,8.418075326091056,2.2809639751552795,381,16,72,6,7,121,63,92,0.062,0.831,0.107,0.6199,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,4,0,8,1,1,4,0,18,14,8,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,10,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,1,1,10,3,9,11,0,10,0,0,0,0,15,5,0,1,4,43,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370942363652437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238103218937808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249472743946606,0.27574775475132995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134704940345738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974098622193604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14699341323342274,0.0,0.0,0.2832099836640707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.357073922491912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812432331630916,0.20342146010130294,0.0,0.0,0.2969915518525361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.279447123452271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996253633999575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18159320916508764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15775955124050167,0.0,0.2145466893568103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,appdes123,2020/03/02,"How do I book a doctor's appointment to talk about depression? I want to book an appointment with my GP so I can talk with him about my depression and some treatment for it. But I don't know what to do? Like I know, call the office and say I'd like to book an appointment. But I know the administrative assistant answering the phone is going to ask what the reason for the appointment is, and I really don't want to just say that it's because of my mental health. I don't want to talk about that with anyone other than my doctor, I'm really private about that stuff. Please someone tell me what I can say without giving away any info about it. I'm having a lot of anxiety about it, and it may seem stupid but I've been putting this off for weeks literally because I don't want to tell some random person on the phone that I've got a mental illness.",5.433314285714285,5.120721274285714,6.406428571428571,80.30107142857145,67.68571428571428,9.971428571428572,28.357142857142854,9.642632912329526,2.261914285714285,673,19,141,13,10,225,83,175,0.085,0.853,0.062,-0.7669,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,9,5,1,0,11,0,13,4,0,2,0,29,27,9,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,1,4,3,0,1,15,7,0,0,7,3,0,2,5,3,0,0,2,3,16,2,27,24,3,6,0,2,0,0,15,3,0,6,3,95,31,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195892039913324,0.0,0.10344819854826567,0.0,0.0,0.09455378368686994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12641888521048547,0.0,0.12705011188758614,0.0,0.0,0.1648661105692873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808177106690894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329414395290718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768208981325709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297219521752708,0.07685255628019258,0.0,0.10815329487636373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373985756110785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229514820903011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321300529889363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496506370766632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725537931162164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807490192749788,0.0,0.14843851423409551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594037151676966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732596131993231,0.13903576201094262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32261354484813703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310547930749773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457730266630213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548024330535896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32607074879716075,0.23638851949547934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31904128662887343,0.0,0.1084708521229442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035389364346553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThicMouse,2020/03/02,Please help me I’m quite suicidal. I’ve been recently diagnosed with bpd and I’m so codependent. I also just got broken up with by a long term relationship. Being happy revolves around that one person because I was never truly happy before. Throughout the day I distract myself by going out or watching tv and forcing myself to not think about it. I stay up until 7am watching tv so I can fall asleep instantly without having to think about anything. I have nightmares all the time and constant anxiety in the morning. I really want to end it but I just don’t want to upset anyone. I don’t really have any friends I’m close with and idk if I even should because of the way I deal with things. If you’re unfamiliar with bpd it’s always constantly loving or hating people no in between. I don’t know what to do anymore and I’m tired of forcing myself to watch tv so I don’t get upset. And I won’t face anything until now really. I’m only 17 and graduated high school early to get out of there a while ago. I want a job but I’m too unstable to keep any and I wanted to move out when I was 18 but I don’t feel I’m well enough to work because my rage always makes me quit jobs.,1.1795384615384634,3.402755187755101,3.5454081632653063,86.42731161695448,82.83673469387756,6.0549450549450565,21.667974882260594,7.321109707123232,0.9118854003139721,931,30,186,14,26,321,138,245,0.151,0.745,0.105,-0.9087,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,15,10,2,3,7,0,16,5,2,1,2,42,39,23,1,7,11,0,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,6,18,0,1,4,3,0,3,10,5,1,1,4,4,24,5,34,32,3,31,0,0,3,1,6,10,0,4,16,121,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931703348532557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959864847045455,0.18645313694467447,0.0,0.0,0.15238259586255046,0.0,0.08571058122294915,0.0,0.11111394717020058,0.07834123619706569,0.0,0.1843993665184377,0.09973968887114064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20489632046517908,0.0,0.09533810809151344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822218636516952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24215168747541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225677386250852,0.11550870831778615,0.0,0.11371862354155915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992345180810865,0.11576765902730815,0.0,0.07400161188671013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056650980708091575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865621168228677,0.0,0.11707294467079638,0.0,0.06367512783870657,0.0,0.08960892403268972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385381279670457,0.0,0.11061667583317576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07509830254290789,0.11837680903408156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22236557078379232,0.09958663442468632,0.0,0.0,0.06157446072091127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991522073452781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112081398439547,0.0,0.07478782120674207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190811888187145,0.0,0.0,0.08641244529428599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592145862760495,0.0852117549301868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776746897468529,0.09782933501086308,0.0,0.12298668811462485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23833746309477116,0.0,0.0,0.21532780210061425,0.0,0.11062635497221866,0.12028943423597825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339084239418445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942013371926034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255398681393845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443464757162133,0.14358189831777932,0.0,0.0,0.0653316444417149,0.12877393078389546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643372672973115,0.08893243567894264,0.0,0.0,0.10073775382717193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800292461007034,0.0,0.08156672836124945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,senallyc,2020/03/02,"Hello Hi! I'm a little lost right now, I don't know what to do and I sick of everything. I'm not happy with my degree anymore, and I feel like everything is a chore. The passion that was in me from the beginning started to decrease each passing day. 

I feel like everyone is against me, or everyone talks behind my back. I can't stop worrying about everything. My friend said that I need to acknowledge that I'm tired or burned out.",2.4143965517241384,4.45725462068966,3.9776867816091968,85.91411637931036,77.50574712643677,8.02816091954023,26.96695402298851,8.841846274778883,2.216288505747127,340,14,69,8,8,113,58,87,0.124,0.706,0.17,0.4958,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,4,0,6,3,0,0,0,14,17,4,0,1,3,0,2,2,1,0,2,1,1,0,4,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,3,11,5,11,14,1,11,0,1,0,1,5,4,0,2,8,44,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889717517811256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14651913654841925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12288726557373937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641522829678886,0.5137549664047858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19269291276510214,0.27225410415490314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472163960555144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20284117816224986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471983044203564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861836030275107,0.19097848527721345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20800492198414536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14128843228590832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627263804231514,0.1812541476632524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487038235461296,0.0,0.0,0.15930610172422244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315472768338104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21900612752689969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19351006506700225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Iwannabeacowboybabe,2020/03/02,"I need help with friend who is starving her self [advice] For context : this person is over weight but is loosing weight rapidly and never eats at school  when we confront about her about it and ask her about it she says that up yes she haven’t eaten from the day before and we barely convinced her to take those weight lose pills she always has lines ready like oh I’ve eaten before or I’m not hungry but we know for a fact the she is not eating.


Today we were really worried about her so we reacted in the worst possible way we have been trying to talk her out of her bad eating habits but she refuse to listen and her excuse is that we are making her mad and she eats according to her mood we are encouraging her to go on a healthy diet and exercise but the is starving her self and I honestly don’t know how or what to do to help. Any advice is appreciated . 


Than you",2.036698612029081,4.133092511235954,3.3429676140119007,89.74443159286189,78.94382022471909,5.985988103106411,19.459352280237933,7.048011613610866,0.28416549900859245,689,16,143,8,17,224,104,178,0.145,0.6779999999999999,0.17600000000000002,0.6976,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,8,1,0,1,7,11,2,0,6,1,16,12,0,3,2,34,27,16,0,1,8,0,3,1,1,0,2,2,0,3,8,17,10,1,2,1,0,1,5,5,0,0,4,5,29,5,23,23,1,12,0,1,0,0,41,6,0,2,5,102,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530532692910678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773796845563384,0.0,0.0,0.08805103295794123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104658667001453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811062846229473,0.0,0.0,0.22035636944485665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350407132506188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5299626198958882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003614596714763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358662907914101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17357580962213046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423179553968171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06325752629525765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448553176433415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642909477493456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600798969628868,0.09986317696604333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305718940586637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14596956505823308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294838524570991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296791852567724,0.0,0.13104095968787424,0.0,0.0,0.2701523489190749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973530592933282,0.10407134738114357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227321691789228,0.0,0.0,0.08790861329712127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277542235938526,0.0,0.4730163099246073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314935131807947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hellothere808,2020/03/02,"What type of mental illness does my mom (probably) have? My mom has a history of mental illness, and whenever she goes to a healthcare professional/psychologist she fakes it to make it look like she is perfectly fine, when in reality she is just off. I will try to provide as many examples and background information as possible. My mom has a history of undiagnosed mental illness. It's probably schizophrenia and bipolar disorder, and because of it, my little brother and I were removed from her house in 2014 for emotional and physical abuse.

* My grandma said my mom has always been a little off, but I have noticed she has gotten worse under stress and after my ex-stepdad left her around 2010. 
* She has chronic migraines and had a head injury as a child. 
* She started out subtle by asking me what kinda dreams I had, and told me to ""smash any mirrors you see in your dreams because bad people are hooking you up to machines and this isn't real."" I could go on about the types of things she said/says, but I have a couple of images of notes she has left around her house (that I will link below). The types of things she says are just so far-out, that it's incomprehensible. She has told me to put cotton balls in my ears, to ""register myself as a clerk in the realm,"" etc. Most of her sayings are conspiracies or nonsense.
* She has never mentioned anything to me about voices in her head, but I'm not sure if she does or not.
* She is extremely quick to anger and calm down. One time, we got into a HUGE fight when I was 13, and I ran away to my grandma's. 5 minutes after I arrived, she threatened to ""beat my ass,"" then when I got home she looked at me, smiled and said *""Hi \[my name\]!""* as if nothing ever happened.
* She goes up to strangers and pretends as if she has known them for years, which usually scares the stranger.
* She mutters things to herself and laughs.
* She can never really keep a conversation. She will start a sentence, pause for a few seconds, zone out, and either continue her sentence or switch the conversation.

Any ideas? I will happily provide more information as needed.

IMAGES: \*TRIGGER WARNING\*

[https://imgur.com/a/F5KCDSd](https://imgur.com/a/F5KCDSd)",4.164928576218898,6.636252486352363,4.557093420964389,81.79015156595806,73.76426799007443,7.1359130843001815,28.013479981221924,8.098718942377014,2.0282831332573266,1724,69,306,28,37,543,212,403,0.122,0.7909999999999999,0.087,-0.9457,0,0,0,0,2,0,94.0,1,3,1,2,12,12,2,2,17,0,30,10,4,2,5,55,50,37,0,5,14,5,0,1,0,4,6,6,1,1,14,22,0,1,5,4,0,4,5,6,0,2,13,9,62,6,59,32,5,46,0,0,3,1,54,26,1,8,17,227,76,3,0.0,0.104962141069149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371220524923501,0.0,0.0,0.12048558009474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290026960860005,0.15772397371347852,0.08281770084623162,0.0,0.08323122088339417,0.0,0.07396717191783783,0.1080046877654044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073020648567019,0.09802079422790777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015293749915178,0.0,0.15504768568707594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996494312070995,0.0,0.0,0.09879889324526024,0.0,0.0801328010174001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05034652856401919,0.0,0.14170362609497292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833796170713044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18183342637356492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886085756725083,0.0,0.0,0.20443701806121686,0.0,0.1000049233396021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874097005910075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925019619638716,0.0,0.0,0.04327955899553703,0.17757663910311464,0.0,0.0,0.148783000329925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05913309174916425,0.08981419671795418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26782721345654203,0.0,0.0,0.4150121750778897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06568678380986498,0.13664885467731752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500245139591679,0.10085787822270742,0.0,0.0,0.0600294340216963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061415675457255514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998695139137032,0.0,0.0,0.19102541625725827,0.0,0.0,0.08905527842977395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008323914839177,0.056751658546840326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25280205504944664,0.2113458918870397,0.08869191309091112,0.0,0.07059306362960836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254059020225236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10147710685566592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349301996744064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17656153527999532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05165629995044479,0.0,0.0,0.1692990140677368,0.0,0.060145349308321626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756702424130186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027860876235774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057047684418522523
mentalhealth,Lynnylyn,2020/03/02,"Am I okay? Current situation: I am 20 years old. I work full time for minimum wage. I'm not currently attending classes. When I'm not at work, I sleep or browse the internet. I eat one meal per day. I am nocturnal. I have no friends and I don't talk to anyone outside of work. Even if I had the chance, I would choose not to because I consider myself a toxic person and that cannot be fixed or controlled.  I don't do anything that I enjoy, and I have no will or plans to do so.  I don't go anywhere outside of work, with the exception of the occasional midnight store run. I have no will to live. I have no will to die. I have nothing to look forward to. I have no emotions. I'm just here. I'm not happy. I just exist. I have dreams but no plausible plans. Advice? Ideas? Commentary? I'm not sure what I'm seeking.",-0.7950877192982446,1.3642537485380153,1.9828631578947369,93.0292421052632,96.30994152046783,5.3090994152046775,21.459883040935672,6.918507183188421,0.7515134970760231,625,25,139,11,25,216,92,171,0.122,0.8190000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.8272,3,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,7,6,5,0,0,5,1,22,3,1,1,1,22,30,10,1,2,13,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,3,4,2,1,2,1,2,4,15,0,0,1,1,1,22,5,14,24,1,13,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,4,8,93,25,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796516962692063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285490492347636,0.0,0.15128918304154693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207051129175637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20619836257662666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118565139276481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908026050438558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18811984506324966,0.0,0.2068014442034164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142821981960088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420385783718966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448363519536018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19570695488688644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20753919338586485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16233894598620288,0.0,0.15438391854540645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17640471698200635,0.0,0.19291492762983425,0.0,0.12457846974159195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16052680061470173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20665004645451693,0.1839782724726052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17327220939462082,0.0,0.0,0.14776805012180266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720179034193797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5353668585802366,0.0,0.0,0.1305985694450574,0.0,0.0,0.11839047532235868
mentalhealth,christmasloner,2020/03/02,"I don't know how to deal with myself anymore and kinda need some advice So yeah, this is kinda a vent/advice needed. I don't kinda think I have think few mental problems, although I have never checked with a counselor/psychologist so I don't really know if I have any of them or not, although if I we're to diagnose myself I would say that I have social anxiety and I'm paranoid. I was never a social person and due to some mistakes I made I'm even more isolated lately, even not eating lunch at all everyday so I can just hide. I always tough my classmates spoke behind my back and in social groups I'm not in but lately they have been directly attacking me verbally, such as kinda making fun of my name or making jokes about my way to talking or insulting me with jokes. Today one of them Sayed that if I should just drop out. This is kinda leading to seriously bad toughs, such as taking my life and searching the best method for it online (apparently the best one I found is blowing my head with a shotgun or cyanide), coming to my school with a knife and stabbing a few of the person I seriously hate most. I'm lately seriously thinking in dropping out and somehow make due since I'm almost 18. So yeah, can somebody give me some advice on what to do, because if it was for me I'm probably just going to jump in front of a truck haha.",5.516055555555557,5.551512411111113,6.637175925925927,77.5335416666667,67.48148148148148,8.972222222222221,29.837962962962962,8.660442795831766,2.256351851851852,1061,35,202,15,16,358,141,270,0.139,0.755,0.106,-0.3123,1,0,1,1,0,0,21.0,0,0,3,3,15,17,3,0,10,3,19,5,1,6,3,63,43,25,0,10,15,0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,2,7,15,2,0,6,2,1,5,8,11,0,2,6,3,32,6,32,35,10,26,0,0,0,0,17,8,0,19,10,149,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250396967371729,0.0,0.0,0.11102611519281927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225756219103554,0.0,0.0,0.0753993579565904,0.0,0.08481969686519547,0.0,0.10995901768483506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613724889674055,0.0,0.08525665965966647,0.0925766762808356,0.06758886920252312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23271465982901304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550969911330512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430809924529635,0.0,0.11253662078935604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345364142471055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14646486345576146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156961094093885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636218720748633,0.06301328218837886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094669150358461,0.11379057637298365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218688992296131,0.0,0.37521825446691465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831486884909147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491337933185252,0.2220314073287076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117367457142841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442602746661455,0.17102853138228735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15026464677928722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936249742271797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195428841182672,0.1060931831889265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102988779302423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17634580052390794,0.0,0.11221224663202613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091717621949834,0.0,0.0,0.3390717988936359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833648160531296,0.08911778216121208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21313424054898125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509731056909548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800806304358252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876299953052783,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsaaalex,2020/03/02,"Weird state of mind - need help, but don't want help I'm currently in a really weird state of mind. I clearly need help and I could get the help I need, I guess. But somehow I don't want help. I'm about to destroy my life and I'm pretty aware of that. I kinda want it that way, I don't want someone to help me. I don't know what this is, never felt something like that. It doesn't make any sense. 
Anybody else?",-0.4450000000000003,1.4911989444444451,1.4244444444444468,100.88000000000002,87.33333333333334,4.488888888888889,16.77777777777778,5.6839178017228535,-0.8017555555555553,315,7,79,2,10,103,50,90,0.16399999999999998,0.564,0.272,0.9419,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,2,0,7,1,0,1,2,22,22,4,0,8,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,1,1,10,1,7,20,0,6,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,3,3,39,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693797510424212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255543618470359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13136536986450206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509883067710781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215861904517366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323278744976045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6324234361998811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864225748400994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107300807651127,0.07682626250789609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496813126245738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175630159277016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3498050959897601,0.12128382340870796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599836463294699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10074080971406486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324063273970016,0.12106165642782578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3710094574692878,0.12482074529262728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lozzaisme123,2020/03/02,"Advice I feel a bit weird writing this down but 🤷🏻‍♀️ I'm just wondering if thoughts of death are normal. As in, I don't wanna kill myself, mainly because I'm terrified of it hurting and my family. But the amount I think of it is crazy. Like if I'm crossing the road I imagine if I just stopped or if I'm in a high building I will look out and imagine jumping. I just think it would be so much better to be dead but again, I'm not in a place where I could actually do it. Is this normal or any cause for concern?",-0.19500000000000028,1.6642239736842157,2.5027192982456117,94.03986842105265,85.57894736842105,5.203508771929825,21.780701754385966,6.42735559955562,0.2888385964912281,399,14,94,4,12,139,72,114,0.21899999999999997,0.679,0.102,-0.9385,0,0,0,0,0,2,9.0,0,0,0,1,6,5,1,0,5,0,10,0,0,1,0,31,21,13,3,9,13,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,7,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,1,2,10,2,12,15,4,13,0,1,1,0,1,9,0,7,3,63,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.2075501247827621,0.0,0.0,0.2078335657737012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14463326398409473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12965095495087736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18810282084680702,0.2321972091207407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21848633965001368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16981186658598446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005007261624752,0.0,0.10754005339431194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22471364493704368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22768396008178896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353047183160963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390727050315272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17860204471060304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563481313810003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4167727772971723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222108195715528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17781439327087945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725602420038108,0.0,0.16884833213968706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306480821897393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15108550008922514,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,melanieslaughing,2020/03/02,"Worried for coworker I asked this guy at my work how he was doing. I noticed for the past couple weeks he had his posture really strange (like head tilt up in a confrontational way). He just seemed off. He’s always been quiet but never so, just not there before. After I asked him he just responded, “I’m doing as usual”. I asked him what that meant and at this point I was feeling a bit uneasy so I just straight up asked if something was wrong and if he wanted to talk. He replied saying “no I just have my emotions turned off”. He explained it was difficult to turn them back on once they had been off for a while. I asked if there was any reason he felt the need to do that. He replied saying that’s what he’s always done and that it’s just difficult to switch back. All this is being said btw with a complete lack of emotion from his face and the same posture I spoke of at the beginning. I was super unnerved but kind of felt like he was saying it to be different if that makes sense. I don’t mean to seem so ignorant, but it really sounded like something out of a twilight fan fiction book. I don’t know if I should be worried or what to think really. It all just made me feel really unnerved. So anyways my question... Has anyone dealt with this? Should I just ignore this trait in him or should I try to talk with him more about it?",3.817836899942165,4.690205805860806,4.5799845768266865,87.81808559861194,71.52747252747254,7.5056101792943934,25.72373240794293,7.669130373188453,1.1916124542124544,1047,31,222,12,19,337,138,273,0.12300000000000001,0.8079999999999999,0.068,-0.9253,1,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,2,19,11,1,0,9,0,26,2,2,4,3,55,52,21,0,11,19,0,4,3,0,3,0,7,0,1,19,8,0,2,13,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,18,11,27,5,34,28,6,24,0,0,0,0,36,14,0,10,12,156,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702073570086981,0.0,0.0,0.06955270187700131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151531465975455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4780816801950311,0.0,0.0,0.15729128716856505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703123833889223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11166133445223644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723677546586127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316891321467265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10685897878377383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104666136834873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300984790216476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342988974367502,0.0,0.1964062752735894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127152524980658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496696854419972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650703480135378,0.05620943895222325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14990392685088266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677813171536803,0.06827151096854855,0.0,0.0,0.1114109734885768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583800962727869,0.0788832741953995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164444397488048,0.0,0.10892297414182746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763614104105944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09668598410309362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457502211900612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620882057308421,0.1051590521443306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729001570102998,0.24400725464059025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18622051378020413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747755257293078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16441472984867905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553575828067848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694402026606075,0.22249868287819047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126450176817082,0.0,0.0603263484364539,0.0811836962214822,0.08204142466338203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744597676483942,0.20773700918175345,0.0,0.0,0.11182518571680593,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,69Noots,2020/03/02,"Help. Please. I’ve suffered from depression and anxiety all my life. I’m 20 this year and worse than ever due to a combination of a new medication being tried, low-key agoraphobia causing me to stay in for weeks at a time and hygiene going oopsy. What would some common signs of ocd usually attain? The last three years and more so since December last year this has been my life although the numbers/phrases can fluctuate: 

Stay awake till 7am and either sleep till 3pm or stay awake 30 hours and sleep for another 15. 

Wake up around 5/6 

Repeat the phrase “Good mood, have fun, look hot.” In my head six times over so as to make a block of SIX then I repeat that three times over so it makes 3 lots of six. I would then repeat that again so then I would have six blocks of six. 

Then I repeat the phrase “Good couple of days, weeks, months.” In my head six times to make a block again and then repeat it so I then have two blocks of six. Then I repeat this phrase five times and then on the fifth time I instead say the phrase “Good mood, have fun, look hot.” 

Followed by “Good day tomorrow, look good tomorrow, good food tomorrow.” And then I would do this push thing from within almost like going to the loo lmao. (I use lmao and lol because I’m embarrassed for being a freak lol.) 

I then repeat this with everything I do throughout the day with literally everything. Opening an app on my phone? I’d close it and shut it down to then open it up another eight times so the bad feeling goes away. Xbox menu opened to look at the time? I go back into a game and open the menu and repeat it all eight more times. 

You get the gist. It’s ruining my life tho lol and idk what to do because finding a therapist is impossible cos I’m a broke ass student.",2.8847155909224886,4.553743267806271,3.653421750663132,90.42692307692309,75.01139601139602,7.120581589547108,22.07495824737204,7.873277556716777,0.7962748993024853,1361,35,295,20,29,432,171,351,0.107,0.768,0.125,0.8286,1,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,0,1,14,18,0,1,22,3,17,11,6,6,3,48,34,37,0,4,2,0,3,1,0,4,4,1,0,0,17,23,1,4,2,2,0,5,0,7,0,13,1,8,20,9,43,27,7,83,0,4,4,1,5,22,1,4,54,178,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820883085187792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719204509680608,0.06271232162493799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297707421897004,0.0,0.0,0.07702026319444534,0.06303539459404503,0.06844752471962456,0.0999450613559966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421314995343179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070619522136887,0.0,0.15860550625338987,0.0,0.07060682873422594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415305650165761,0.0,0.0,0.14735161469857572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041450127532010606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749256613284282,0.0,0.09912713668153088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0428296953247573,0.0,0.13976856904550378,0.4125514369689512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682644830653198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054947578646179315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807310135109285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336446931430027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17370872892005154,0.040049911432223716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753607533962383,0.0,0.0,0.06969407057874308,0.0,0.0,0.16416122129468586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258338876725056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06543340641789143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917407545039244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998633109916633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519154729613515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678123740000377,0.0,0.16407277452831026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621303132275389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518182938881507,0.0544619986464468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4302139987910991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05565712703095786,0.0,0.08007979733186525,0.0,0.0,0.07080196659539155,0.09028628688135916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315143049512138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835417543309452,0.2329369588082136,0.0,0.0,0.15837185692748482
mentalhealth,Successful-Cranberry,2020/03/02,"Brother (15) says he doesn't care if he lives or dies Hi!

My little brother (age 15) told me this morning he doesn't care if he lives or dies. He had been hinting he has mental health issues but I didn't know it was this bad (because he doesn't appear to be very depressed). He added: Don't worry, I won't commit suicide.   
Do you have any idea on how I can help him? 

/Worried sister",1.4512698412698413,2.9839519753086456,2.9080423280423315,94.82333333333334,78.62962962962962,4.628571428571429,21.447971781305114,3.1291,-0.32371393298059997,294,8,66,0,7,96,56,81,0.106,0.737,0.157,0.6711,0,0,0,0,0,2,14.0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,14,1,0,1,1,10,19,6,3,2,5,3,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,5,1,7,2,2,12,0,4,0,1,0,0,17,2,0,5,1,32,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927471545163807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587258009617755,0.11588337183036244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3876398286559513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373310050462245,0.0,0.3945881743849125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20206771789641792,0.0,0.0,0.12742021668790013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21460008738513495,0.0,0.19841531228681436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447414737525317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905304308852771,0.33572407627004497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19157637941721425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15117538001414052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20793886182548368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18164897286994944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685264747731814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3861121426776028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,swagseven13,2020/03/02,Had to take a break from Discord and with that my long distance relationship Due to all the drama and all the problems people had i decided to take a break for a maximum of a week from discord. After a while i noticed i was stressign myself and all the drama and problems got on my nerves. With my break drom discord i also took a break from my ldr. You might ask why we havent exchanged numbers and i can tell you idk. I am writing this on my first day of my break.,4.425085910652919,4.554884515463918,5.43458762886598,84.89387457044677,69.82474226804123,7.7037800687285225,30.59965635738832,7.1686216300943375,1.7027058419243986,366,14,77,3,6,121,56,97,0.175,0.825,0.0,-0.9231,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,9,0,7,0,0,0,3,16,12,7,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,2,0,1,5,0,16,0,14,6,3,15,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,7,59,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19110860781720265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22340981775553112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541194169104009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032724241862437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911305249825486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114857827794931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535152230132699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27207517188603403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567551044086518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4573345267350832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25657023520323785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35935964545547416,0.0,0.2088751058516871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655105552192646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19169171808646948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21563820360201405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheRegal6,2020/03/02,Why do I get hypnic jerk when I don’t have anxiety? I don’t do achohol and every now and then hypnic jerks happen to me and cause to lose 4 hours of sleep.,0.6864761904761885,1.9906283142857149,2.782857142857144,95.8904761904762,80.14285714285714,5.80952380952381,17.38095238095238,6.42735559955562,-0.4331904761904761,121,2,30,1,3,41,25,35,0.263,0.737,0.0,-0.7845,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,2,0,0,0,5,1,1,1,0,4,7,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,7,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,18,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28041589640530834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3765560789558726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088409572480876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19151144617299815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3241460631768436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36098583077131385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4100846835559205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36682276267991415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307616156046703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,huntday4,2020/03/02,Need help fixing my sleep schedule So I couldn’t find a better sub reddit so I hope this is the right place. I can’t remember the last time I had a normal sleep schedule. It’s probably been since I was in elementary school. I’m currently a sophomore and I run on about 2-4 hours of sleep on a daily basis. About once a week I’ll come home from school and immediately go to sleep. And I take constant naps at school and it’s definitely affecting my grades. On the weekends I stay up all night and normally wake up between 2-4pm. And it’s not because of school work. I just always feel like I’m wasting the time I have to myself when I sleep. I also don’t like talking to people so being awake when my family is asleep is always a joy to me. Maybe it has something to do with depression which I believe I have (self diagnosed so take that with a grain of salt). I just have no idea how to fix it and it’s really screwing up my life.,1.294272287862512,3.2604855969387785,3.3637701396348016,89.31957572502688,80.78571428571429,6.5752953813104185,21.54027926960258,7.669130373188453,0.8209224489795917,731,22,160,12,19,248,114,196,0.059000000000000004,0.826,0.115,0.8837,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,12,7,1,0,11,0,15,10,7,2,1,25,24,15,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,9,10,0,0,4,2,0,3,5,2,0,0,3,2,21,5,23,19,1,27,0,1,0,1,3,10,1,1,15,99,30,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827494376416918,0.1836985318352378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728974701931725,0.0,0.0,0.12436623432821108,0.0,0.0976266718066001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508701014020654,0.0,0.11928710398650302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507454553335493,0.11203857724907636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040612708620166,0.0,0.0558140353851528,0.07885915462588229,0.0,0.0,0.10089000352076882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273440978288443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398882178391107,0.0,0.11072527960282104,0.1096373350111608,0.10870711172838808,0.0,0.0,0.1246113688477056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997860894831869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796827754161703,0.10785719161534947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089669380499596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184917074486853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358896115999218,0.2163079690349415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755655445586148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652714618305607,0.0,0.11532896028101144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901383356739854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071553699295602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504482717319235,0.09426829274315156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44686255458503216,0.0,0.0,0.11515575841007022,0.0,0.0,0.09131171524300803,0.0,0.5523242139720325,0.0,0.0,0.0849798613674952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176558549524714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16599175126657095,0.08872338133934521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873290697046202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854428812712471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036168493647403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fabuloushi,2020/03/02,"My boyfriend admitted he hears voices My boyfriend (29M) recently admitted to me (23f) that he hears a female voice that tells him to do violent things. I know he had an extremely rough childhood from the limited information that he is willing to share on the subject. 
He’s an old fashioned guy so I have a hard enough time getting him to talk about these sort of things let alone get details but I wish he’d tell more about it. 
I want to bring it up for discussion so I know what’s going on, but I know he has a hard time talking about his problems. Usually all I get is “it’s life, you just gotta deal with it.”

Long story short should I bring it up for discussion or wait until he does? (If he ever decides to again?)",1.5089795918367344,3.6995151360544254,2.9217959183673483,91.56963265306123,81.31292517006804,6.64108843537415,24.08571428571429,7.793537801064563,1.2188661224489798,563,21,122,10,15,183,94,147,0.09,0.8440000000000001,0.067,-0.5058,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,1,8,3,1,0,7,0,10,1,0,0,2,22,27,7,0,5,5,0,3,0,0,3,1,4,0,1,12,1,0,2,7,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,7,16,1,19,21,3,18,0,0,0,0,27,5,0,3,10,75,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17137211135249505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17058742119180914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447997672063426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17096984892731473,0.0,0.0,0.14967280396986796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593463126751196,0.0,0.09403772243889907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16383662535220486,0.0,0.0,0.2964487509487794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729827553990673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728061447131395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16919944262134787,0.116873009053127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643155137682454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17362795987002813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832791067054586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337698590344815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659894222996651,0.2892478670847729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198555374999176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929682516554685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822366110729212,0.0,0.09759569951444713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19027688715296714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sunflower_girl_97,2020/03/02,"Choosing therapists and counselors Those of you who go see a therapist/counselor for your anxiety/depression/other mental health issues: what do you all tend to look for when searching for the right therapist/counselor? Aside from the more obvious stuff like if they accept your insurance and if they specialize in your specific issues. I’m wondering about stuff like the age of your counselor and how you “vibe” with them, so-to-speak. Do you prefer someone more relaxed and someone who talks to you more like a friend? Or someone who is more professional and talks to you like a client? 

I went to see a counselor for a few months about 2 years ago. I didn’t feel like she was a good fit. She was more middle aged. DEFINITELY not professional (she showed up to pretty much all of our meetings in ripped jeans and t-shirts. Not saying that’s a problem because I don’t mind her acting more like a “friend” than a “therapist” but she might’ve been a little too relaxed and unprofessional.) anyway, I stopped going because I felt like I couldn’t really connect with her. I feel like she didn’t help me much. She laughed after a lot of things I said and I don’t know if it was just a nervous reaction on her end, or if she was trying to lighten my mood so I wouldn’t feel so down while talking about my problems. Of course my anxiety told me she was just laughing AT me though. 

My mental health problems have not gotten better in the 2 years that I stopped going, so I’m starting to look for therapists again. I prefer someone younger or closer to my age. I’m about to be 23 and I think it would be easier to connect with someone closer to my age. But then again, older people tend to be wiser. Obviously I have to go with someone who specializes in what I need, but I have a list of therapists I’ve been looking at and they all have pros and cons. 

So, help a girl out. Tell me about your current and past experiences with therapists and counselors and tell me what you tend to look for in the right one. Thanks in advance.",5.232710808179164,6.053911111392406,5.540569620253169,82.39860516066214,68.26582278481013,8.608568646543329,30.129016553067185,8.730908602173464,2.235963972736124,1599,59,313,25,26,509,173,395,0.049,0.7809999999999999,0.17,0.9919,2,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,1,12,4,2,18,25,0,1,19,0,24,2,0,1,5,63,54,33,0,13,15,0,4,8,2,2,2,2,0,1,15,20,0,2,11,3,0,7,9,4,0,1,14,12,55,20,51,34,13,47,0,0,6,0,46,19,0,9,29,220,70,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06209341016939709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05358660130057508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854013376649664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06195184804059992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204182120564228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06852047854035866,0.0,0.0,0.1062552653304695,0.10008474679278268,0.06725715665456583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823796958872632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592397876467702,0.05875301906657372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891569976512986,0.0,0.0,0.09390352367927393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462240251976019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03849660135154851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737756894254081,0.07020659395078893,0.0,0.0,0.23529103250743805,0.0,0.0,0.05955238582065391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14118400948145818,0.07430995967951591,0.07072860795216569,0.0,0.055911721502265546,0.0,0.1029868200077224,0.051939775211023886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04746640234597147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686883322845483,0.04856252951760412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126409583269072,0.0,0.20107970147391693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0448746036388066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964138158145615,0.06663177963957079,0.05570505703836685,0.0,0.0,0.11163852585605537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3561091438364569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049580402505620486,0.0,0.0,0.11712668870947443,0.0,0.0,0.16037662089458865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16890601727995347,0.12245024586220635,0.06449087504564355,0.0,0.5693186645385951,0.04653684207313845,0.044883991155776064,0.06882189814065158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693395706188934,0.0,0.047558058742915306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649352862777945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596417147997855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04976015724021828,0.0,0.0,0.09021735372473798
mentalhealth,Fl4kisaguy,2020/03/02,"I can't sleep and need help determining what is wrong To start off with why this may be happening, I have a bit of a fever which may sort of explain it, but sleeping has become unbearable. I binged a certain game and every time I try to sleep I keep on having an overload of information like I'm playing the game that just forces me to stay awake. It's like this sort of place in sleep where I'm sleeping but I'm still sort of playing the game in my mind so I'm awake and aware. 

It has become so unbearably strong and I have tried so many things. I feel like I'm losing my mind and I just want to sleep since I have school in the morning at 6 and as the time says, it's 3.",3.682275494672755,3.5991683082191765,4.557214611872149,91.28314307458143,71.39726027397259,7.858751902587517,25.126331811263316,7.3871296695380915,0.7880404870624056,527,13,128,5,9,171,81,146,0.059000000000000004,0.77,0.17,0.9356,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,7,9,0,0,8,0,11,7,6,0,1,25,23,12,0,2,4,0,1,3,0,2,1,1,0,0,10,7,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,12,7,17,20,1,13,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,5,7,73,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27109877549457706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399307536232374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340817541147533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205769024312206,0.08768075909288729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085327323765694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226560491522764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909107722824474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988400609908964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13730727060480435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443239476218107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24785147521705356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100525431803183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282302711816497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760251872443773,0.0,0.1242127441705505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152632937245283,0.0,0.7369321658523923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687132589393104,0.13081746466718375,0.09801504463760033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153861141711635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313365463975602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666558321897515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239133395667269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107477954692245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418969610798628,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Quietxxxxxriot,2020/03/02,Is there an app where I can talk to people about my mental health? I don’t feel like counseling is enough. I sometimes need someone available “right now.” Is there an app that would accommodate this?,3.3079729729729728,6.109124054054058,3.006689189189192,89.98138513513516,78.72972972972974,5.8621621621621625,22.763513513513516,7.1686216300943375,0.8188972972972981,158,5,30,2,4,47,30,37,0.0,0.9179999999999999,0.08199999999999999,0.4329,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,2,7,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34783453792931857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17021306177741372,0.24049252245288405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35782787504574065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644631381056302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33924948264600346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24961101379407544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23338072173098495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874849421944812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852302307599391,0.0,0.33294119199185723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27057492411724604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23913625434111,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,allthisistoomuch,2020/03/02,"Struggling to cope with my job, and I'm unsure of what to do Possible Trigger Warning

I have had my job for about 4 months now I work in a hospital as the receptionist. It's very busy and stressful most days I don't get everything done so I come in early the next day to finish it. As well as normal receptionist duties I also admit patients, make up their files etc. I think I present myself at work well enough to hide it but about 3 weeks ago my facade cracked and I knew I needed to speak to someone. I went to the nurse in charge knowing he would be very understanding as it is a psychiatric hospital and broke down. I explained to him how I was feeling, my constant panic attacks throughout the day, not being able to focus on work so I was making mistakes which was making other people's jobs harder so I was putting so much pressure on myself to make things perfect, because of that I felt like everyone disliked me as I had annoyed them, my stomach was playing up due to all this anxiety to the point where I had to be running to the toilet every half hour. Because of this culmination of things, trying to be okay for my job and be happy for my family. I found I had become extremely suicidal, I had a plan in place and it was taking an immense amount of willpower to stop myself eachday and I found myself growing weaker.

The NIC was lovely and explained he wouldn't allow me to leave unless I went to another hospital to have my mental state assessed. I agreed they informed my partner. After 10 hours in the ER I was seen at this point it was 12am I was exhausted starving and hadn't slept, the psychiatric reg was amazing and very understanding I asked to just go home. She got my partner up to date and we left with a plan, which was to see my gp the following day and book in with my psychiatrist. One thing she said stuck with me though, 'have you considered a different job'. 

After seeing my gp she gave me until my psychiatrist appointment off which was about a week and a half as I was in no state to go back to work. She also said to me maybe I should quit and find something less stressful. My psychiatrist also said the same thing he's given me another 2 weeks off as well as doubling my dosage for one of my anxiety medications. My trainer who doesn't work for the hospital had even asked me if I thought i was going to be okay returning to work. 

When I spoke to my partner and family they were concerned for my mental health but also worried for my job security as I was taking so much time off work.  I'm starting to think maybe I am not cut out for this type of work but my family shut me down especially my mum as it's very good job and it's something she's always wanted me to have and she doesn't want me losing it. My partner's also worried about me quitting as I was unemployed for about 8 months before I got this job and he doesnt want me throwing it away because its hard to find a job.

I'm not sure what to do as I feel torn and very lost. I would like advice or if anyone has been in the same situation how have you dealt with it. Thank you

Sorry for any spelling or grammar errors.",5.065412203829926,5.334588955696205,6.021455696202532,80.75483284647844,68.46202531645571,8.823823433950015,29.970950989938327,8.69343788997812,2.1967759169100938,2468,87,494,37,39,819,275,632,0.14300000000000002,0.763,0.094,-0.9809,13,0,2,0,0,0,34.0,1,3,4,15,27,29,3,5,22,2,51,6,2,8,3,83,106,54,1,12,12,1,4,2,4,4,3,5,1,4,29,27,0,3,18,2,0,11,10,13,4,4,46,12,92,16,97,50,11,70,0,3,3,1,38,28,0,5,31,357,121,21,0.054754287070602335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053505255623088235,0.04853637180345266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21893491794090816,0.045559953117225986,0.0,0.0,0.037234792812517965,0.11482928821552695,0.08377375947987319,0.0,0.0,0.03828547062035136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237573425114477,0.0622909061283409,0.05144345510374312,0.04210266697685542,0.0,0.10013311556196162,0.06047180824362281,0.046591865453282616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716597003541202,0.0,0.059169932506474524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14124794180554726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0572065761328353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0560326459556538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05657581528746506,0.06106550372585124,0.03616469021015273,0.0,0.04613284839001964,0.052320067739383774,0.04920962264224592,0.0,0.1548524065302188,0.0,0.05537082545028741,0.0,0.0525727022066175,0.0,0.10008885284996634,0.0,0.0,0.12007049922866404,0.0,0.0,0.02860685509453115,0.0,0.09335436946579204,0.045925298195266674,0.08758401053935215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05828695673848714,0.04904908637723651,0.0,0.0,0.058201246730155635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492301432349917,0.0,0.10784388670665172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4890166307323008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030091524225689007,0.0,0.0,0.05797688411283604,0.0594906931110912,0.0,0.0,0.053500357833653256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061256041627787076,0.059770772379287185,0.0,0.04941788183131318,0.0,0.14619564717453662,0.0,0.11001608167761744,0.0,0.0,0.0551591837804757,0.11035888604281463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740869910677057,0.0,0.08050140221181876,0.04059961007379935,0.0,0.0,0.0582318054734291,0.0,0.05364757589327606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420584394225481,0.0,0.0,0.06424235840715307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03795972844706565,0.0,0.0572065761328353,0.0,0.1035209988626918,0.06172723168929595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05504318174152192,0.0,0.11647584827600295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625159682915202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726415546765062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615461127820546,0.0,0.0,0.04639312975054387,0.08430505047877067,0.0,0.06129294157603124,0.03875536620734126,0.0,0.0,0.04577703572570195,0.1254417016878993,0.057241069276480185,0.0,0.059892303074835965,0.0,0.051605267573672085,0.0,0.0823368192439797,0.0,0.0,0.050410391064140116,0.0,0.0,0.14550526139623285,0.07016867254726206,0.053795809044166816,0.04346878782084216,0.03192766511318086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037174566755140616,0.0,0.0,0.11400228770828745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258901058303918,0.09688649144670608,0.0,0.1317617590810637,0.0,0.14769203940599174,0.10151554534835347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188941848624811,0.11121127271307983,0.0,0.07779174911542637,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymous12757,2020/03/02,"I had/have 'depression' To start off, I am not a sociable person. I never was. When I was a kid I had ADHD, and I had absolutely no control over myself. Nobody likes me and my parents were constantly fighting, so I didnt have a very good start in life. But another part of ADHD (more or less just ADD now) is that I used to be able to completely forget my problems for periods of time. Eventually things got pretty bad, I had a few very close grandparent die when i was young and i thought that was the worst thing in the world. But i still though that life wasnt too bad. Later on a few more family members died and I got pretty paranoid that people constantly die in my family. But still things were getting better, all until my father shot himself. I was completely broken and never spoke about it to anyone. And his gf he was with at the time was crazy and kept everything of his, although that just pissed me off. I started to lose reason in living and I got into a very philosophical state. I am not sure quite how to describe how I felt other than grey, if I wasnt in a social setting I was too deep into my mind and i would constantly remind myself of my poor father who finally got a job and was about to get his own home. I stopped really caring about my friends and just let lose of everything. It took about a year before most of the intense emotions to really start hitting and I had a horrible summer just sitting around feeling sorry for myself(and yeah, i know that's pretty pathetic but i didnt want to say anything about it out of the fear that people would think i wanted attention). A few years later my grandmother had cancer amd died within a week of diagnosis, and I was scared of myself since I felt absolutely nothing for a long time. Since then nothing has really gotten better or worse, it's just been a stalemate and I question if I'm still somewhat broken. I cant think right without meds for add when i was fine before, i started getting medical issues left and right like constant dihareah and extreme headaches. And i cant even tell if I'm happy at any moment. Normally I'd be able to know if I'm happy sad or just kinda zoned out, but now I cant tell the difference, its sort of a bleak existence where I am living it but I don't feel like I'm really here, my memories are foggy past 30 mins and cant remember most of the day before, and im struggling in school because I cant remember for the life of me half of the assignments that I had already done part way. I dont know if this is just a medical issue or if it has to do with my mental health.

I'd appreciate your opinion and I dont want sympathy. Just a bit of observation from experts while staying anonymous. Sorry for any crappy spelling, my hands are freezing and I want to sleep and check this in the morning.",4.697579068430134,5.360579787234047,5.920822311673376,79.76310810810813,69.39007092198581,8.934176729921413,29.0730304772858,9.068930737419137,2.3408511213341003,2216,78,431,40,37,744,258,564,0.172,0.747,0.08,-0.9925,3,0,0,0,2,0,45.0,0,1,0,6,31,25,2,3,27,1,49,10,3,5,4,100,86,49,4,14,27,3,6,3,2,2,7,2,1,2,22,32,0,3,15,0,2,1,18,13,0,1,36,9,63,12,62,44,15,72,0,4,1,0,21,26,1,17,43,309,85,3,0.12268576078767607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474444430102022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769339390195206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343052440962058,0.06432335867721067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042892368264382884,0.0,0.050479963811982775,0.05460816899639595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243748567005788,0.03739405052405274,0.0,0.15659481929558447,0.0,0.0,0.1085055854641006,0.06697053772334176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254315485018475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12863368599159974,0.26515944499293115,0.06880125645268201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03956108308414765,0.0,0.052834532996609535,0.0,0.2546569002279781,0.06409025384501096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277506443606648,0.1437867979272882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900248391709138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04051639396164637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026205097244043,0.0,0.11565721651752668,0.06902779477897797,0.062033606948901476,0.04382336601024495,0.11779757005266127,0.06719812705514416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047393357224685205,0.0,0.09614736951528223,0.0,0.0,0.05145149768110383,0.1962460209188886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060127369093313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520461333624153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061531910627768124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626083731647092,0.12805205950099652,0.060873343429161765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113732842861473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664921903475067,0.06272725131000176,0.12998487163999636,0.08990709843556798,0.0,0.10833377448285224,0.054286518800674866,0.0,0.13725398451916945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813811135507296,0.12359299679692567,0.061819195437540976,0.0,0.061938822308263974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462282205669817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06010299845922878,0.1177202963290414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06811400923689875,0.13285672329294196,0.058558720427515226,0.08505485895226371,0.053562237054701874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872232875723508,0.0,0.058696851999947335,0.0,0.0,0.06871806501878977,0.06524570414324524,0.0,0.0,0.1571912798180675,0.06307069768716794,0.0,0.0,0.1389790508127026,0.1047729693690672,0.0,0.04878232061211471,0.06141492462623958,0.0620822698986479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014869291232358,0.0,0.06138718148843311,0.06253134147043228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733666477062673,0.2170940323641561,0.06538334856988404,0.146965510567044,0.05128539476160683,0.0,0.06412889755490507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057814938808022576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072327625222292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226045197603548,0.07861208167884436,0.06026906853213044,0.04869939496647547,0.10730858059207074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815419721483927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05298055311887633,0.0,0.15184290201318154,0.1447264807820529,0.04869112318057378,0.04920555850643141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05913234767386821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251363579020769,0.08715244443712489,0.0,0.0,0.07900560753659283
mentalhealth,2-verbatim-2,2020/03/02,"Annoying thing that happens Idk if its just a puberty thing but for some reason i go through these mood swings like ill feel very sad and angry for no reason and feel suicidal,i feel very pessimistic and nihilistic and then one second later im all optimistic and i am just full of energy and am very happy n positive for no reason.and then when im at school i feel anxious and shy the entire time and very unhappy but as soon as i get home my mood lifts as if i didnt even go to school.it is kinda annoying because i feel like 2 different people and I can’t properly process my emotions without it quickly changing.anyone else feel like this",4.167952755905509,5.898171346456696,4.97244881889764,82.03268897637797,71.75590551181102,8.859527559055119,30.02283464566929,9.3871,2.800251023622047,519,22,98,12,10,168,83,127,0.24,0.593,0.16699999999999998,-0.8614,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,2,0,2,0,5,1,0,2,1,27,15,19,0,2,7,0,6,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,7,9,0,0,8,0,0,2,5,3,0,2,1,6,9,4,11,14,3,11,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,4,10,62,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487203848274677,0.0,0.09204862972860456,0.13488495813682308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024903380304843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375400865960221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997177023032824,0.14808191642130866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694969983298298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3993793358463822,0.18809317156254213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877861939867615,0.0,0.14963277450978485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641246073971065,0.14013761387528054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204978617541738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843964801410058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19294400259873065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920546283043891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126545741258167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4060562426172954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664617555919492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17491700784665373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676274514802088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4344807442410635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12690023415039148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Frederick_Nicholas,2020/03/02,"I feel like I am being endlessly punished - suggested treatment options? I am writing this post to seek some sort of guidance in which sort of treatment would be of any benefit to me.

A bit of background- I am a full time worker in my early twenties (m) with a long history of anxiety, depression, OCD and anorexia.

I am not a religious person, but most days I cannot help but feel that my immense mental anguish is some form of divine punishment as I cannot find any other good reason why I would be under so much distress.

I am told sometimes that people suffer more greatly than I, and while I can definitely believe this, I only find myself absorbing the pain and suffering of others, therefore adding to my distress.

Mornings are horrible- I wake up wanting to kill myself because the thought of getting up and going to work is so horrible to me. The same goes for most other tasks- doing the dishes, the washing etc. Even on a Friday night, I can never enjoy my weekends because I'm thinking about Monday morning.

As well as feeling depressed all the time, I have extremely bad OCD which mainly attacks my job and my relationship. I am in a 4 year relationship with someone who I love very dearly (we are getting married in less than a month) and yet I am constantly plagued with doubts like ""do I really love her"" ""what if I'm not good enough"" ""what if she's not good enough etc"" and I feel so dysfunctional and horrible for having these thoughts RIGHT before our wedding.

My body image issues have also been coming back badly and I see such a revolting person staring back at me in the mirror.

Everything dear to me is being poisoned

The things I used to love are no longer fun
Seeing friends is just a mere chore and the only time I can feel somewhat happy is when I'm drunk

I have tried medicine which only seems to inhibit my emotions and destroy my sex life (bad)

CBT which didn't work

I am literally considering ECT at this point because my emotional pain is so unbearable I don't really care about potential memory loss at this point",8.506558083187507,7.288399736572895,8.581569524835107,70.19033517297079,61.86445012787723,11.300632655808318,38.73751514335712,10.307518312809881,4.038843478260869,1631,71,283,30,19,535,216,391,0.23800000000000002,0.615,0.147,-0.9939,1,0,0,0,0,1,36.0,2,0,0,4,15,39,6,4,18,0,37,13,2,3,2,54,62,25,1,5,8,0,5,2,1,2,5,0,1,2,18,16,2,0,12,2,0,2,9,20,1,0,5,8,46,19,41,51,18,37,1,5,3,4,18,16,0,12,20,211,64,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090802712732894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059500255428032,0.0,0.06783102560369655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087301977856386,0.0,0.13636093685766207,0.2221030420242123,0.16215416301313654,0.0,0.07545021348229894,0.09989883812362164,0.0,0.0,0.09680284554074584,0.09849051975947216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040326633786623,0.0,0.0,0.07637991039100636,0.0,0.09581895886575163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718373400314791,0.0,0.15273979605827848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19947986143243676,0.0,0.18323616364554052,0.19777724062752605,0.05856459213064165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968937276108219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241668454498936,0.06334466879286736,0.0,0.0,0.16208248459809865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850492761505135,0.0,0.09265107988018956,0.0,0.05039225221809016,0.22311235143904146,0.0,0.09775714087018687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438908029046376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05943250891429271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254669410194204,0.08798963039336757,0.0,0.09809836383656667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626290598809324,0.08663772915415911,0.0,0.0,0.07846867701907262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400798743133113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935681615869294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07077421073028986,0.0,0.06518142087052027,0.0,0.06838647814075642,0.0,0.0,0.08320921605623274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20230876916015397,0.18869869785817908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061471451876787035,0.15484352184366465,0.0,0.0,0.1676404537165966,0.0,0.0849197447537194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11360639840940832,0.09116580535129888,0.0,0.19039319479798675,0.0,0.07572226471121886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14131434951855704,0.08072031254334691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512838367247454,0.0,0.08769524024747383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05890729491262513,0.056815082117381135,0.0,0.14078549072854196,0.15510963933369118,0.0,0.0,0.0847263839286075,0.0,0.06019997204447025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658096342927125,0.0,0.07316065387221524,0.052298875151176365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972347243026504,0.0,0.08000937145293632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291031926499238,0.0,0.0,0.12597486751857093,0.0,0.0,0.057099493920831815
mentalhealth,PapiHobi,2020/03/02,"My friend just called me after a suicide attempt So she video chatted me and a few of our close friends in a Instagram group chat. Told us shes packing her stuff, leaving Uni and going to check herself into a mental hospital/ institution. I'm glad she called us and that she is taking this step but shes afraid she won't come out of it. Shes leaving the week of midterm exams and that will bring all her grades down a lot. She said she is afraid to fail but I said grades aren't important if you are dead. That it's best she goes and gets help. I don't want her to fail yet I also want her to get help. Shes not okay. Hasn't been for a while. Shes the youngest of our friend group (just turned 20) and I just want to make sure she is ok. She had to take out her piercings, her hair jewelry, and wasn't bringing most of her clothes because you can't have certain items (hoodies with strings, Jean's, tank tops with spaghetti straps). Its really sad. I feel terrible that I can't do much more for her. She is going to miss a lot of events while she is there...but I just wish the best for her.",1.6965584415584445,3.298796004329009,2.553461038961044,97.32733441558443,78.13419913419914,5.832121212121212,21.93961038961039,6.508806274219699,0.11641974025974022,851,24,203,7,20,267,126,231,0.152,0.682,0.166,0.762,0,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,4,2,0,6,7,17,0,2,10,2,23,1,1,1,3,34,44,14,2,5,8,0,2,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,9,14,0,0,1,3,1,6,8,7,0,0,6,4,42,10,24,36,10,19,0,4,0,0,46,7,0,4,6,133,51,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070464161946496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438733587119708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29055331732653383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28271068571890456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924757956640845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06999577140662515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208584599529243,0.0,0.14465082458682105,0.0,0.1573490745182859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18557714454776075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29316064510354195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23538119292200266,0.0,0.0,0.09240495348457348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139507679311697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176401925216387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868358161345914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633625431113913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15847240972281812,0.15142298930711606,0.0,0.1304712538810717,0.0,0.2081684400144807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322784506708502,0.0,0.0,0.15057510922242268,0.0,0.0,0.333035171505209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449537153381332,0.0,0.11104242343955736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15919086149280742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LOULA-995-,2020/03/02,"What is going on in my mind? I need advice please Hello everyone. I just realize how low is my selfesteem and how is affecting me. I'm experiencing extreme paranoid caused because of my difficulty to trust in others, in me and in the situation that sourrounds me that actually is really good. This is making me be hipervigilant because I see everyone as a threat and people that surroundsme specially the ones who spend more time with me are feeling it... because I behave really wierd when they are close to me...
and I'm scared because I understand it like if I was a person who make feel bad and uncofortable other people.  And I belive this because I think when someone is feeling bad others persons can feel it because of my vibrations and aura...(I know is crazy) and because of that they start to feel uncofortable, bad or sad like me in that moment and the worst is when im bad and someone is close to me I imagine that they are feeling uncofortable and sometimes my mind is even wanting to cause that feeling in others persons.... 


Have someone ever experience something like this?
Can someone advice me about what to do, or way to deal with this? 

I know is fucking crazy what I just tell...but I needed to put it out to get new perspectives because I've been triying to figure it out what the fuck is going on in my mind by myself for a long time  but I haven't found any good solutions. So please I would like to hear your opinions.

 I'm already looking for a psychologist but wanted yo write this because I wanted yo hear differents about what could be the root if my crazyness.

Thanks in advance.",5.4559407476345605,6.614039635179157,6.293187529083292,75.98168295331162,67.95765472312704,8.84436171862882,32.53435706530169,9.107695989026183,2.92471192802854,1276,55,227,23,21,421,143,307,0.085,0.809,0.106,0.7565,1,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,3,1,12,20,3,1,9,0,26,2,0,8,1,61,59,24,0,9,8,0,7,4,0,1,0,2,0,3,28,17,0,0,15,0,1,4,1,11,0,1,3,12,36,9,34,52,2,30,0,2,2,2,14,15,2,5,14,163,64,0,0.0,0.0,0.07944828622738496,0.0,0.0,0.1591135696837552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984233542151514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05536428834738842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719090421330049,0.4466627794338933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16726913816560252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500242674125489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393422356065725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506026587370563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377315638280495,0.07364359283696427,0.0,0.1555890659181704,0.0,0.0796384803792707,0.0,0.0,0.2881574302277853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926621097077476,0.0,0.15053179844483472,0.0425354367389718,0.0,0.09253886556438053,0.13657234321270276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835189122223417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794105345226548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948597256506709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909900467044044,0.0,0.0,0.07204879752403692,0.06836722639322021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868890832908004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466146899426861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073484765902524,0.0,0.07863011520747566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05516821003632808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288438541413685,0.21326260318836512,0.0,0.17873617193948368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818435220209097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431174205275602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150958225184472,0.0,0.06487638980601633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151270833930908,0.0,0.0,0.27592715509709004,0.0626764481724017,0.08052049363437436,0.0,0.057625223819978484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115939431735285,0.074955041125981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052166781743902296,0.0,0.0,0.09494627599972742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847548093086427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406019865427788,0.06462261630988002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578341452141266,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dyslexic-Banker420,2020/03/02,"Mentally Abusive Father? Please help So I do love my dad, but very steadily over the last probably five- ten years, hes become increasingly condescending & belittling to the rest of my family.

The main thing he’ll do is very actively & PURPOSEFULLY aim to set someone off, make them feel like an idiot & that he’s superior, but then the SECOND you get even a little defensive, he’ll play victim & ask why **YOU** started an argument with him. 

So it’s like he’ll say something completely rude/ out of line to my mom(he’ll say some shit like “oh I guess no salad tonight? I guess you were too busy on Facebook”). My mom will get a little defensive over the statement, and my dad immediately retreats to his line of “oh I guess everyone’s being mean to me tonight. You’re all just mean. I’m going to stop doing all these nice things for all of you if this is how I get treated” and then he’ll make himself a strong drink almost signifying that we push him to drink

He does this every single night, without fail. Like clockwork. And it’s not just this, I can go on & fucking on with stories just like this in a matter of a week. 

I feel silly even saying it, but I feel like this is honestly emotional abuse and I just need some validation at this point because this is driving me to the point of tears & I can’t do it anymore. 

I can’t watch him treat everyone around him like shit & then play victim. AND I FEEL LIKE IM THE ONLY ONE WHO SEES IT. 

Any input on this would be wonderful",2.4943480345158235,4.642621459731546,3.805680728667305,86.73384228187919,77.69127516778524,7.075934803451582,24.065675934803448,8.07648339933343,1.3754588686481308,1177,40,240,21,28,385,163,298,0.128,0.664,0.209,0.9805,0,0,3,0,1,0,44.0,1,4,1,2,12,28,9,0,14,0,17,7,2,3,3,46,45,15,0,3,10,4,4,8,0,6,0,3,0,0,19,10,3,3,8,4,0,5,5,10,0,4,1,9,32,18,29,36,9,32,0,1,2,2,30,15,3,8,19,146,51,1,0.0,0.18022914404155155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615964605344429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5768506626697789,0.0,0.05172106044292424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754276581930076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06770645226854954,0.07110260510583648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046363365471960835,0.08399848134000759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974384309875544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06655759732119901,0.0,0.0,0.14901292319197973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555337909337782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004692647372596,0.0,0.0640809216261384,0.14535058108430304,0.0,0.0,0.07169934419678158,0.0,0.1538259027952012,0.16300443835879125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031305267662348,0.119209220973197,0.0,0.08644937742436877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513545855432009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05097910063805813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215412275291363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061996237407935986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29725909905449344,0.15245728288948165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864400363466915,0.0,0.1015366721936555,0.0,0.0,0.16569575410594084,0.0,0.0,0.07664711126733154,0.0,0.0,0.17815301860085478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05639496631978521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137391768975927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0515378849975132,0.057844431672068174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348724988763448,0.14379604221912412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200182206540871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18144965796003207,0.0,0.0,0.06060722134494779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15614190625292626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644424659496861,0.05855204611196831,0.0,0.0,0.05383321583633676,0.0,0.0,0.06358667936164683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010571813482468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255092340751196,0.0,0.0,0.061007974806533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06862920434957641,0.0,0.0,0.07331579778058972,0.08248008149281573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05402838923018143,0.0,0.0,0.04897792302811983
mentalhealth,Necromitus,2020/03/02,"Venting/Advice I'm just kinda sad and wanna give up, kinda suicidal. I come home every day to drama, my dad mentally and emotionally scarred me to where I hate myself, and I just don't know what to do. The last time I came clean with thoughts of self harm and suicide I got tossed in a mental hospital. I'm scared of those places, especially since I can never tell if I'm really having these thoughts. I inadvertently seek attention, and I don't trust myself at all, nor do I trust my family and other adults. I have no clue of what's going on or what to do.",3.0409649122807,4.505942219298248,4.979824561403512,81.92043859649127,74.17543859649123,8.224561403508767,23.19298245614036,8.841846274778883,1.5541824561403508,439,12,90,9,9,151,77,114,0.248,0.7290000000000001,0.023,-0.9788,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,1,2,0,8,0,0,0,2,22,20,9,2,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,6,9,0,0,4,1,0,3,5,4,0,0,4,0,15,2,13,16,1,13,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,4,4,59,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831720734145385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21439064229751995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16146990469224778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088849060135015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21085383609792133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793307393287276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767093471912535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17981725825434358,0.10653105144046923,0.0,0.14991933616266265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18506615036891189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18802568634903516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301655081234297,0.15279518611220572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37780710961519504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14457149859299456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19584332494388487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008402621637974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876682072295633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19554920601478867,0.0,0.0,0.15505897110271838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41007550409891613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16383786531769334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29762564074264397,0.10930247038279288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,macaronimadi,2020/03/02,"Mood swings/easy triggers massively impacting my life I have a question.

Why is my mood so noticeable? If one bad thing happens, it impacts my whole mood. I can’t control it. My feelings just take over my body. I become rude to everyone. It’s really been impacting me at work, to the point where I’ve basically lost my job because of the way I treat people when I’m upset. When I’m angry, sad, etc. everyone can pick up on it and it’s just so visible to everyone. I’m tired of being this way. I really don’t know what a solution to this problem is.

Also, I’m easily triggered. If someone says/does something that upsets me in the slightest, my mood instantly flips. 

It’s impacting me at work. It’s hard for me to maintain steady relationships/friendships, it’s getting really extreme...

A lot of people refer to me as mean or cunty when they first meet me and I’m in a bad mood. I deal with these ups and downs multiple times a day.",0.9958926919518944,3.4733635106383005,3.4148473635522687,85.13847826086958,86.76595744680849,7.099352451433859,24.131359851988893,8.18289091462,1.9093378353376507,732,30,144,18,23,252,112,188,0.166,0.794,0.04,-0.9698,1,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,5,9,14,1,2,8,0,8,3,1,4,0,20,20,13,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,14,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,8,0,2,2,2,20,1,21,17,3,19,0,2,0,0,4,11,0,5,6,91,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116290583939505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428356233477493,0.08864535779171127,0.16060256533466094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16152642400792486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309845842574114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378246848027763,0.14991939465250692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16217931688621626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41685889713647184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352762279067197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236923295994478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597481285542879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859250441583744,0.0,0.13026581027261222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14430475523866654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991783486953034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271291192543726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15874073646805392,0.1236290365645522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15840264460710354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16555916018357408,0.0,0.0,0.09853888320932123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20162882325083314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13746684997722164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13914522160244802,0.0,0.0,0.16290124698918287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794751513796307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12321205315746238,0.11194974791403324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093361086442618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660914287439797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479430450739919,0.16713640063424307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308518053076888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121697082598288,0.16235381099049698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117318203587086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Designer_Eggplant,2020/03/02,I need advice I started self harm again but now my cuts are very visible and my watch can’t cover all of them. My school has a uniform and we don’t have long sleeves so what should I do,0.4671951219512174,2.2506380975609765,1.9343292682926825,99.45076219512195,82.65853658536584,5.0756097560975615,20.006097560975608,5.985473137389443,-0.2951024390243906,146,4,36,1,4,47,34,41,0.133,0.867,0.0,-0.6187,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,1,0,1,0,3,2,1,0,1,0,7,0,0,0,1,7,9,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,8,0,1,8,1,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,4,25,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4135948790924092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3745628202539141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138344191449132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4283514694759383,0.0,0.0,0.4415419267284648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29957843980079235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34922547297868584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Upballoon,2020/03/02,"How to cope if you know you deserve more? Hi everyone, this is my first time here and im on my phone so  sorry for the formatting.

I'm a international student in the US graduated in December with my BS in electrical engineering with a 3.89 GPA.

 At my current job i get paid $25/hr(non exempt) with 4hr/month of vacation and same for sick leave. I get only 4 hours paid on holidays too. And i don't do anything that im interested in.

I know i'm not supposed to compare myself to others but everyone i know is doing so much better and loves their jobs and most definitely get better benefits if they're not paid more. I just feel like i deserve better.

 I'm great at electrical engineering and i love it to bits. I have multiple projects under my belt. But every time the job door gets slammed in my face when i tell people I'm from a different country.

I'm sorry to say this but it hurts to see people become more successful than you when you helped them get there. I'm still happy for them but a part of me does everytime i hear how great they're doing at their new fancy job.

Please tell me if I'm being unreasonable. Thanks for coming to my TedTalk",2.7037659574468123,4.474934982978724,4.608670212765958,82.94875,75.7659574468085,8.104255319148937,24.94148936170213,8.841846274778883,1.8452595744680849,911,31,187,20,20,311,130,235,0.042,0.701,0.257,0.9964,6,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,4,4,5,11,14,0,0,7,0,8,4,1,2,0,28,33,19,0,3,10,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,6,10,0,0,4,1,3,1,3,1,0,1,3,4,30,13,29,29,8,21,0,1,1,2,18,11,0,4,10,114,36,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999610122752705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078239914774926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29016699644091115,0.11939563417002873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420619598569197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426064000791444,0.0,0.0,0.09570394794906058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214270698864978,0.2090013012237632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055297016369460425,0.0781286630528997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302377140778566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856872227525842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411453044307868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641852093347925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325959805495447,0.0,0.07330344529129625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770013125265772,0.0,0.11707492483328252,0.0,0.23626074871069094,0.0,0.4341020209692325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803084740917081,0.0,0.0,0.11579920233322667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053429042078406624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974080319986273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729218367314849,0.0,0.08039409417632863,0.0,0.0,0.10562308023868412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317518511329093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842903813048038,0.0,0.15163651314551724,0.0,0.0,0.1200472934606896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696952874755069,0.0,0.0,0.08714783271010039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448449533558173,0.0,0.0,0.08733711336250513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19117546491915455,0.10068638844358024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275404226716688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13154974193617167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mommyshark4k,2020/03/02,"I had an affair with my psychiatrist. Im 33. He is 60. Im 33 years old The psychiatrist is 60. 
I feel so fucked up about the whole thing it started out fun real fun but now i feel used and abused. I have no idea hiw to get help.",-2.5101923076923067,-0.7908812499999982,0.7873076923076958,100.99519230769234,101.8846153846154,4.138461538461539,12.269230769230768,5.985473137389443,-1.2512769230769232,173,3,47,2,8,61,39,52,0.18100000000000002,0.685,0.134,-0.573,0,0,0,0,1,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,3,0,4,1,0,1,0,9,10,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,5,2,5,9,1,6,0,0,0,1,3,2,1,0,4,25,7,0,0.0,0.29911183658579205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25529249747162064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333858537019919,0.131894647090794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921183863388914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849851954527421,0.5453783997121635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649036910060785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873432410665356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17868533020845628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16771648821840193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21803564855235805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818512846511996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16256945109522325
mentalhealth,madocgwynedd,2020/03/02,"Fired old therapist, got new one, old one won’t leave me alone Had a very bad nervous breakdown in November after a job loss coupled with horrible suicide ideation. My therapist was useless so I fired her and my psychiatrist and got new ones that specialize in Autism Spectrum Disorder. I also had my meds retitered.

I should also mention I’m a staking/DV victim and someone with serious trust issues.

I’ve now gotten multiple texts from the old therapist asking when she can reschedule my appointments. I blocked her number from WhatsApp and today she added me on Facebook.

How am I supposed to handle this? I don’t want her to say “well he had a suicide attempt so he needs to be committed” if I don’t make another appointment with her or something. But this doesn’t seem right.",4.444836670179137,6.856126054794522,5.035205479452057,78.96590621707062,72.69863013698631,8.327924130663858,33.83350895679663,9.057496981413335,3.415729820864067,628,33,106,14,13,201,99,146,0.26899999999999996,0.669,0.063,-0.9865,1,1,1,0,0,2,12.0,0,0,0,2,8,9,1,1,5,0,12,0,0,2,1,18,21,13,2,4,3,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,6,1,3,7,3,19,3,12,11,0,13,0,2,0,0,11,4,0,3,9,69,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13628618163297418,0.0,0.2104628307865505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798219855893082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12301764741887253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098710466794338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560036539091256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15081202119526532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210486967578264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137344388285235,0.13058145489788375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933340630781252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783646197922107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461653527392254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975713347295774,0.0,0.2541783234746256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4142405346235741,0.0,0.26750367398921304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11237600896774494,0.0,0.10464459548271404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11979338706844544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114946568160334,0.10130339041071827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878733042222664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4583537795990193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473067709183285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857443747865167,0.07761440951885347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831402146951216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fluid-Transportation,2020/03/02,"Feeling like I want to be a different person? For a long time I've always daydreamed about being a different person who had an interesting life and was confident and attractive ect. 
Then when its come to my life I just have felt so limited and like theres a barrier between me and the rest of the ""good"" people. Like I know I'm stuck as ugly, uncharismatic, constantly tired, anxious, and I wish I could just force myself to change to be like the lucky people who were born into easy lives so they can be happy all the time.

Is this something that alot of people experiance or is it just me?

Rant below 
Like literally though, I was unlucky enough to have been born into a weirdly neglectful home where we were poor and my mom always had to work and leave me and my sibling home alone. I always had low self esteem and was fat as a kid, then I was sexually assaulted and then in an abusive relationship where I got into drugs a little bit too much. But i still pushed myself and got into a good college on full ride despite all this. But college has been such a struggle for me because now that I'm away from all those bad environments I have to face my feelings from them while tackling a full corse load, plus I'm broke but dont have time to work a job. My body constantly hurts from pushing myself, I'm always sick, and I am always fat and inflammed in my face and body which makes me look like ugly shit. 
I have to watch all these people who are cool and outgoing and dont have existential constant worry in their lives have a good time and make friends easily and they get to do whatever they want and they get to feel good without even fucking trying. 
I guess I am just jealous, but I feel like I'm missing my chance to be a child and have fun in college which I'll never get back and it just makes me want to die because I feel like I already didnt get a childhood in the past either and now I'm just a sad adult already :(",7.832717948717949,5.840430835897436,7.897435897435898,77.03256410256411,63.71794871794872,10.82051282051282,34.230769230769226,9.2995712137729,2.8031538461538457,1526,49,312,21,18,497,189,390,0.17300000000000001,0.672,0.156,-0.8794,3,1,2,0,0,1,25.0,1,0,6,3,23,32,4,1,23,1,36,14,7,3,5,68,68,38,1,5,13,1,6,8,1,0,8,0,2,6,14,29,2,3,7,0,1,4,5,13,0,0,16,9,41,19,38,46,12,44,0,6,2,1,19,18,2,4,30,214,55,6,0.0,0.09132359216700253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07982848386577107,0.1701126808050195,0.0,0.3206710201098463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707502408015354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241633977825658,0.05926742345004154,0.06435604088450354,0.09397079706209736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841480759819226,0.17123025039032871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153720210840254,0.0663949749325243,0.0,0.24987843031174575,0.0,0.06153967959485328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999371409495197,0.16105803338565697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806672427682436,0.0,0.08938480160592974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796411021543311,0.0,0.05090860419371893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539605537297382,0.0,0.0,0.1948621307377346,0.1651913837715123,0.0740059674914506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059549466979883926,0.07125640618008505,0.16107811843782507,0.0,0.0,0.25859398376872994,0.12329096973695758,0.0,0.08490895957855772,0.0,0.0,0.08204985561919816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15462894779814934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251247827386589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648698819339825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0423594806837649,0.0,0.0,0.0816133700726927,0.0,0.0,0.10888347052399004,0.3012472691289542,0.07725136131300964,0.1361207330341357,0.06821068284839381,0.06472523285591945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15434840503825867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027160230131233,0.0,0.0,0.05666043312449466,0.0,0.059446502079344994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735786783778691,0.2137418326641938,0.13460125442205875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275180823872784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040807763014843,0.0,0.07911839032833162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059337608333091076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061553758664273775,0.0,0.0,0.08057757228080702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572772043659125,0.0,0.17977677747342924,0.08858862537728078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05233019539260818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13638596144793755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863469847130777,0.07429943754678628,0.0,0.11222588761651477,0.07827539281451522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YeetOrBeYeeten3000,2020/03/02,"I need help. How should I go about getting it? And if I tell them I have a lot of serious suicidal thoughts on an almost daily basis, will they make me go to the hospital? If so how long will I have to stay there and what will happen?",1.7759999999999998,2.9996772000000007,3.6810000000000014,90.93550000000002,77.0,7.4,22.5,8.07648339933343,0.9262,180,5,42,3,4,61,38,50,0.127,0.8190000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.5632,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,3,0,12,13,7,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,8,0,5,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,4,1,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3162301466288727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649935426494931,0.0,0.35895517791270715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792627196346368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21167546470040494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794748863183821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684836191165641,0.0,0.0,0.21080032799440346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23416322675556198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33660297827858376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3454361980406386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27602492089742825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507115610415697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stethoscopemeplease,2020/03/02,"Etiquette regarding on how frequently to contact a depressed friend? 
I'm wondering how to go about it, they normally aren't good at texting but they don't normally leave me hanging. We live far from each other but I'm willing to drive out to see them and check up on them but our friendship is fairly new despite being told of their personal struggles / inner demons, so to speak.

Guess I wonder if I am being annoying by texting them, I see I get left on read quite a bit but I also know they are busy.",2.3629,4.7010734900000015,3.7680000000000007,85.85900000000002,79.1,6.8000000000000025,27.0,7.908726449838941,1.8712000000000009,399,17,76,7,10,131,72,100,0.107,0.821,0.07200000000000001,-0.5394,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,2,0,7,1,5,5,1,1,2,0,8,0,0,2,0,17,19,10,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,1,1,3,2,3,0,0,1,3,15,2,15,15,2,14,1,1,2,0,14,9,0,4,2,53,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688315253993915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141751251377832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16896747586067512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515663239293178,0.0,0.10249469691021572,0.0,0.11149224864718824,0.16454445983246174,0.0,0.0,0.21611173910813256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781407620259617,0.0,0.0,0.207723748217253,0.21314753192026414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17322841129306288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18946954455087545,0.0,0.0,0.3844247830094617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17129470979075118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20865902118495094,0.19623068431318305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126562894182893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20508741792561075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18745609985961947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4254924686893199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,im_scared4aFriend,2020/03/02,"I have a friend who cuts herself I thought she stopped but she never did, I am the only person she trusts and I feel awful about it. I don’t know how to help and I know telling her parents or the school won’t work for personal reasons. Please help.",-0.5174999999999983,1.696748019230775,0.7873076923076958,100.99519230769234,97.65384615384615,3.3692307692307697,19.96153846153846,5.148860815047168,-0.4370461538461541,195,7,44,1,8,61,40,52,0.121,0.6,0.27899999999999997,0.882,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,0,3,1,5,0,0,2,1,12,9,5,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,1,11,2,3,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,13,0,0,1,2,30,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959267480773184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19801627643301373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3435841631834507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817108888470406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976738934152967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949272388304228,0.0,0.0,0.2845901466332381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4475814907440293,0.0,0.28133976992638426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263518464177091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593886704324159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142777701513216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240169676692332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20347309033383584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865890117263266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tightpinkshirt,2020/03/02,"I just can't seem to commit myself to anything. I'm fairly new to reddit so please bear with me.

My main problem is that I feel like I just can't commit myself to anything. Work is especially horrible. Don't get me wrong. I absolutely love my job and my colleagues, and I always leave work feeling good about myself because I know I'm doing a good job, but as soon as I'm home something changes. Every evening, and every morning before work I just dread going. There are days where I have to convince myself to not just call in sick, because I'm just so tempted to not go. But then if I do end up going I'm glad that I actually went. And yet despite being aware of the fact that going to work will make me feel better about myself I still end up in the same dilemma every night before work.
The same kind of goes for hobbies. I really love drawing and learning languages and I really need to get in shape and lose weight, but the most I can do is stick to it for a few days and then I get overwhelmed/distracted and give up. It's like I lack discipline to do anything, and it seems to have gotten worse since I left school. 
If there is one thing that I can however do regularly then it's mindlessly using my phone. 
I just don't know how to become more disciplined to the extend where I can force myself to develop interests and hobbies, and come to terms with the fact that I will have to go to work  every single day for the rest of my life. 
I don't know if this is normal and I'm just over thinking? This has really been getting to me lately, because I honeslty thought I would have my life together by now and have loads of hobbies, and have a good time going to work, but it's just not working out. I hate this feeling of dread every evening before work, even though I know that there is nothing to fear. And I hate sitting on the couch all day knowing I should be reading the book I took out 2 weeks ago, but I just can't bring myself to get up and do it.
So far I've just told myself that I'm just someone who get's bored of things quickly, but how can I get bored of something if I haven't even tried it properly??",5.2351252847380385,4.8416324851936245,5.907602733485197,83.9842651480638,68.1116173120729,8.572974943052392,29.40510250569476,7.839951260653429,1.7098019316628696,1667,52,354,17,25,545,187,439,0.087,0.7879999999999999,0.125,0.9493,3,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,11,33,22,2,3,12,0,38,6,0,4,5,80,85,38,0,10,24,0,5,2,0,4,3,0,2,0,20,22,1,2,14,2,0,10,10,10,0,1,6,5,50,12,50,73,11,48,0,1,0,2,7,16,0,7,23,245,70,15,0.0,0.0,0.06878356467599199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06248103782840188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058649483849040326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17401038961772122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289017029669615,0.07784556607819801,0.1799336044114001,0.0,0.0,0.062338591976252425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197345521873602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456418756697397,0.060716914934012677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18182895975155086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485825362521942,0.0,0.0,0.1862197187893017,0.0,0.29693486948932823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793156502560117,0.14255810687947393,0.05035477060565665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577799184878721,0.06761600060336534,0.2403507997531794,0.17735938146173744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917944313562106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070258464091246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398917300719532,0.0,0.0,0.07339967821804501,0.1936846115190877,0.0,0.07951058042502927,0.07463384169084708,0.07658257320435974,0.0,0.09957181886496468,0.06887119406398927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885511240235851,0.0,0.0,0.12723161741900652,0.0,0.04704953945903581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052264017242816915,0.0,0.06807522064572698,0.0,0.06614575569870082,0.06906070837687539,0.06763262452150548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04776271865993382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737178249101774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744499080788446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050445581503463,0.0,0.13546422075265638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133496908233962,0.0,0.12833448808859585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05830623592763715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05972203498563705,0.1085261805192183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056289716691446084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365471092838062,0.045164186370872814,0.06925152942023098,0.05595751959349403,0.04110059276345196,0.0,0.0,0.06735180257903915,0.07831185230645253,0.047854947236026506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06087673863842739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056539121402389085,0.08583220575786779,0.0,0.06534065478530597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4618277746815798,0.0,0.07183062545231178,0.05007079267174177,0.0770646996566498,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dust_dreamer,2020/03/02,"Had to listen to something incredibly offensive at work the other day, and I'm still angry. At our staff lunch/meeting, where we go over how we're doing as a company, what feedback we've gotten, announce employees of the month, this time we'd received awards from corporate...

And there's always a slide in the power point about how a smile is part of our uniform. Accompanied with horrifying clip art and a speech that includes some incredibly offensive phrases like

""We all make the choice every morning about whether or not this is going to be a good day or a bad day.""

""We can all choose to be happy when we wake up in the morning, and I don't know why anyone would wake up and choose to be depressed or sad.""

at a previous one the presenter said ""If someone comes in and they're feeling bad, or they say they can't smile... Well, buckle up, buttercup.""

​

wow. Just WOW. I thought this was 2020, but I guess some of us are still stuck in the old model where we stuff down our feelings until we snap, and where we treat those with mental health issues with contempt and shaming, which is, as we all know, SUPER EFFECTIVE. /sarcasm",7.0081506849315085,6.688049141552511,6.8297831050228295,78.60166095890412,64.4337899543379,9.674429223744294,33.31849315068493,9.075114841892004,2.7261260273972603,898,33,171,13,12,284,137,219,0.10400000000000001,0.7609999999999999,0.134,0.8421,2,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,13,0,2,5,13,17,3,1,14,0,15,3,2,4,3,47,30,21,0,2,9,0,2,1,0,1,1,4,0,0,9,20,0,0,8,1,0,5,3,8,1,1,6,6,18,9,29,19,6,32,0,2,0,0,19,16,0,8,12,118,27,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306303644407338,0.17010134466362142,0.19076311212391853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977282981510704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621644160992685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523516670602195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037415896876636,0.0,0.1352174392248127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322729806672881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587602842642193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844494958212892,0.13167788879986309,0.0,0.0,0.17294497535560055,0.0,0.0,0.16712147137857844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668757220118977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16385941723284667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17255798161445796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669862196233662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047937353058752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15821154892272685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530994259617342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16473725512219986,0.0,0.10638220382786004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17000761517683846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484086888095287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14933585046879955,0.12484676401014536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301926433652114,0.12086052239672287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507488804026219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17971889094181126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463453551462475,0.09154360889584827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18884268804967247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14115514183372668,0.0,0.14166134302974945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429243429924164,0.0,0.0,0.11152299159838347,0.0,0.19076311212391853,0.0
mentalhealth,Art_Drifter,2020/03/02,"School and Procrastination are Becoming a Serious Problem I'm currently in high school, and I feel completely overwhelmed. I have to get up early 5 days a week, stay in school for 6 hours, go to an exhausting track practice every day, and go home.  By that time I need to do all my homework, which can take many hours to complete; I feel like I work slower than everyone else. I also have a procrastination problem; it's gotten so bad that I'll spend hours just doing nothing productive after school because I'm so tired and over it. That's the problem; I'm just over it. I feel like I'm gonna reach a breaking point. Is something wrong with me? I keep blaming myself for procrastinating, but if I didn't, I'd literally never do anything that makes life worth living. So, why not just say ""fuck it"" and stay up super late anyway? I don't know what to do.",5.008208714362559,5.688424656804735,5.9722323830016135,79.6089564281872,68.70414201183432,8.749004841312534,29.564819795589024,8.841846274778883,2.2217289940828397,673,24,133,11,11,223,107,169,0.11199999999999999,0.7809999999999999,0.107,0.4433,2,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,8,12,1,1,6,0,11,4,0,1,2,24,29,11,0,5,6,0,3,2,0,1,3,1,2,0,10,6,0,1,4,0,2,2,4,9,0,0,2,4,13,3,17,26,1,25,0,1,0,1,1,8,1,1,14,75,23,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268971578581868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538048377657793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677638613666252,0.07065501557477948,0.12800869710214016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430497621896233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949912632051804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682430766057086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976555189523334,0.1107528267822308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17581615539275994,0.16560605575485754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715291656257347,0.060555924408409435,0.0,0.13174371718210898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246069524831404,0.1162628290549711,0.0,0.3424311880703137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030222776623047,0.0,0.0,0.06369872047532422,0.0,0.13074663489271568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818675965962574,0.11325130337088035,0.0,0.10234682277114016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736792920687208,0.11751014885070625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08594257951514211,0.08939359166032672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121460839400167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956831432705492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327181945357225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217283429634997,0.0,0.469210870192859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922984101484731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470800272660977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714663296072153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758552342583111,0.13321650771236687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297253049389208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458683171170073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438070214726902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672464589320187,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Squanchception,2020/03/02,"The beginnings of madness? I'm not good at writing so here's a list of what's going on.

1. I was standing on a busy london train when all of a sudden all the noise around me stopped and I heard a voice say ""what are you doing?""

2. I keep feeling like I've seen things before but across time

3. I keep getting energy spikes that shoot up from the middle of my spine up to my head and down my arms, generally followed by some philosophical thinking, recent example - before the energy spike my heart started going mad followed swiftly by heavy emotions and the idea that time doesn't exist as past or future but instead is layered like sheets of paper.

4. The filter we all have that stops us acting like bagels in front of people seems to keep turning off.. Eg - I had an hour where I kept making stupid faces for no reason followed by hopping and skipping on the platform.

Any insight into what's going on would be greatly appreciated.

Sidenote - I do not drink, smoke or take any drugs",4.0553124999999985,5.713335989583335,4.766583333333333,83.68675000000002,71.91666666666666,6.578333333333332,26.8625,7.0316486544052195,1.32500375,778,27,145,7,15,250,134,192,0.107,0.7809999999999999,0.11199999999999999,0.2609,3,0,3,1,0,0,20.0,2,1,0,0,6,8,3,0,12,0,10,7,5,2,3,33,32,11,0,1,6,0,1,3,0,1,1,3,0,0,7,7,1,6,6,1,0,8,4,3,0,0,5,5,15,5,27,25,4,37,0,0,1,0,6,16,0,4,15,91,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20627678794539625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13501530496021916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581139741660157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857539121957794,0.17588494321131076,0.0,0.0,0.17060435426233714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076687119472373,0.10835054965214136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923946578447788,0.0,0.2585866338914796,0.12721063126164722,0.0,0.16721280807926847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15565354419985966,0.0,0.0,0.17972548588255038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493609126644351,0.0,0.0,0.17121297294662147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4044243561111015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22228971482577625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10123854006186203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478279792027066,0.1051464270899306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15593838135918414,0.14975233251939005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061125679834718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380714494026858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735030133174654,0.0,0.0,0.2535999042268041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140343031368964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076045709820508,0.0971817438351332,0.0,0.0,0.17687586551922768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496955685258144,0.0,0.0,0.18243607772643866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773950198260236,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alt-for-Alt-Things,2020/03/02,"Can someone help? So I made a post on r/teenagers and if you sort by new on my profile you’ll see it, and I was wondering if I should get checked out or anything because of those thoughts or anything? Just asking for advice ig cuz those thoughts have gotten really annoying and they started about a little over a year ago. It’s constant and I hate it.",1.4494718309859138,3.8879331549295806,2.496602112676058,92.970536971831,83.64788732394365,5.240140845070423,27.184859154929576,6.6274283507984215,1.1760830985915494,278,13,57,3,8,88,54,71,0.10400000000000001,0.856,0.04,-0.6545,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,1,0,3,2,2,0,3,0,5,0,0,2,0,17,15,10,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,5,1,8,0,8,8,0,11,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,6,5,39,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260596786016606,0.20506614691594136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38074100945900297,0.0,0.21626871334333253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410207879438808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499929356383391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086394865635318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22839723158979244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550602046997022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318602838900917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21889650757288884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22342655761594987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215567413374256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482003007643718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18434550689213056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19601095030013346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637414030994877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36731121418072704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508749303116637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14897333761194034
mentalhealth,WatermelonBoiz,2020/03/02,"I hate how my depression/anxiety paralyzes stopping me from doing the things I want and need to do in life. I  have loads of unfinished schoolwork which if I were feeling alright I  would be able to do in a few hours. Instead, all I can do is sit behind  my desk in mental turmoil while contemplating suicide. The worst part is  my parents are going to pissed at me when I inevitably get grades that  are not A's, and I feel completely powerless to stop that from  happening. I'm too distracted  to read anymore to escape any of it or  pursue any hobbies for fear of failure. What is there left for me to do  in life?

I've made and deleted  many posts like this because there are always people who comment ""jUsT  dO YOuR WoRk aNd yOu wILL fEel BeTteR"". If I had the ability to make  myself feel better, I would use for fuck sake. Unfortunately, this is  the attitude shared by my parents and therapist, so I don't really have  anyone to talk to.",5.163688524590164,5.9391021584699475,5.961871584699455,79.48084016393445,68.39890710382514,9.160109289617486,31.096994535519126,9.2995712137729,2.690974863387978,737,29,141,14,12,242,119,183,0.204,0.7140000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.9813,3,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,2,0,3,8,12,3,3,6,1,23,4,1,4,1,25,38,12,1,6,5,2,4,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,9,5,0,2,4,1,0,1,2,7,0,0,3,4,21,5,25,31,4,14,0,0,0,1,8,6,2,3,6,106,30,4,0.14733634914945254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12259564536118896,0.0,0.0,0.20038753960064387,0.0,0.11271190382200948,0.0,0.14611806789822826,0.10302100106604753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981487091495527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26061405532255355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544793588918526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657943547364606,0.29799074036769096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13621008064236842,0.07697716134703518,0.0,0.08373464258913245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302890469670955,0.0,0.0,0.14546414164650456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450966252647662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600813744512196,0.0,0.2081360413155196,0.07198109794796266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394132160090986,0.09834815714276066,0.14937593268312432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484803860634936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092480360022178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3271991592981945,0.15955090830644625,0.0,0.10214447312378723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110749495654398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473762204579919,0.0,0.09438743802797746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24635957034787814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611620523123686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842337644461685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17106885731063298,0.0978837235544426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725129994446754,0.0,0.0,0.08690279608152396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726261694825068,0.0,0.0,0.20932703029879832,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hey__Jude_,2020/03/02,"We had a family member killed in a mass shooting (among other issues). Please see description to get a full pic...? I am broken, yet am trying to hold it together, which I can normally do until im overwhelmed...then it all comes flooding in. I don't even know what I am asking for, aside from prayers or good thoughts ,please. I know what needs to be done, but I am broken and feel strong, then, weak... So....there's that.",3.5889558232931726,4.658819963855424,4.3062048192771085,88.82790160642574,72.25301204819277,7.461044176706826,23.471887550200805,7.793537801064563,0.9415477911646586,319,8,68,4,6,102,62,83,0.11199999999999999,0.787,0.10099999999999999,-0.2263,0,0,0,1,0,0,27.0,1,0,0,1,2,4,1,0,3,0,10,1,0,0,1,13,19,5,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,2,7,2,9,15,2,9,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,1,3,44,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22056797405675488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20323766234704405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24144407441629226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15583326479447152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22241912328165755,0.0,0.11929614845505765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326663380712873,0.0,0.0,0.1978916206067463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548509775281451,0.2462555097399068,0.0,0.0,0.2610278284453343,0.0,0.2593281145494013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494328723453342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311668329295247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5179729642781824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18801015807179092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18730654357653875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018481206697224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CrazyK_Nin,2020/03/02,"Why does saying ""I'm a bad person"" To myself make me feel better? Often when I feel guilty about something, I always catch myself repeating ""I'm a bad person"" To myself quietly, and I keep saying it until I feel better.

I do have a history of depression and anxiety, and I am still dealing with the two, but it has become increasingly easier because I have a support system, loving friends and family, etc.

I'm not very concerned about this issue because I don't see it as a bad habit as much as I think I should. I don't think I should be complacent with this, but I am.

I'm also mostly just curious as to why I do this in the first place and why it makes me feel better. Probably makes me kind of a bad person if this is what it takes to calm my anxiety and guilt lol 🙃",4.261937500000002,4.436181318750002,6.211250000000002,79.02875,70.1875,9.4,26.625,9.3871,2.1361375000000007,601,17,122,12,10,211,84,160,0.149,0.654,0.19699999999999998,0.9072,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,4,7,14,0,1,8,1,13,1,0,3,0,27,31,16,0,3,5,0,4,0,1,2,0,3,0,3,10,8,0,1,6,0,0,2,3,6,0,2,0,8,21,8,16,28,4,10,0,1,1,1,8,2,0,3,5,88,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628275261927616,0.10018131727428856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842092672070799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40211135687652816,0.1467877925446918,0.13297084376308901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3194484512743527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12412571593645055,0.1036991762060317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536166527606584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427631471729304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350112696103325,0.0,0.2435086892166777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241102562457646,0.0,0.0,0.0930196941866301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566490445360062,0.0,0.1070158473390388,0.0,0.12537666094930136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866447746396456,0.0,0.2411010906227413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850685705554527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153823575206693,0.12579095810290558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981010247092042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149166932996034,0.0,0.0,0.09594213171251216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268875878896952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615051313427457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366269551482733,0.0,0.0,0.09052479697260836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542931800014313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761198120536775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934149099359288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3259231499274558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Holden-McGroin,2020/03/02,"I think I was drugged, and I need to get it off my chest I know it may not be that serious for some, but it is for me. Just hear me out.
There was this party I was looking forward to, be it for meeting new people or just dancing. So I went, got in, had a couple of drinks, and... now I can’t even remember how I got back home.
I know my limits, I know how I react to alcohol, when to stop, etc etc. and there were times in which I drank too much, and never reacted this way, was always able to remember what happened, not this time, I basically lost those 5 hours. I don’t even know.
I, for sure, didn’t drink enough to feel that terrible. Dizziness, throwing up (what looked like a bunch of green, half-digested, spongy stuff, and I didn’t eat anything green, for the record), not being able to talk, bloodshot eyes, hyperactivity, temperature shifts.
Most is what my roommate told me, when I somehow showed up at home, at 5am (the party was 11pm), she said I was talking nonsense, loose words, not even enunciating right. 

Maybe this is not the appropriate place for this, but just needed to get it out of me, and maybe someone can, somehow, talk me out of this, because I’m pretty sure a friend did this to me, or who I thought was a friend, now I’m feeling betrayed, lost, traumatized and unsure of how and what to do.",4.784797169811323,4.800604222641514,5.474658018867924,85.31160966981132,69.0377358490566,8.587264150943396,29.01533018867925,8.278499904357787,1.7192311320754718,1009,33,222,13,16,328,140,265,0.111,0.769,0.12,0.3369,1,0,4,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,0,3,20,9,0,0,7,0,23,8,2,5,3,51,49,18,0,2,12,0,2,1,2,1,2,2,2,0,22,11,5,2,10,4,0,4,10,4,0,0,21,9,29,5,31,24,7,28,0,2,5,0,11,13,0,7,13,157,51,0,0.21536353660946767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507906220087355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959985743614388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861292023351593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280063302745949,0.0,0.06564180649252721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914782848922133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109742761225842,0.12487666453466645,0.1101853317586708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126405180987434,0.2401872720994461,0.21336837718299792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889427505998787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16638933415212365,0.0,0.11251855907627333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17224589406007465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522263208737512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136517895197542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160271868887491,0.0,0.10604485093974107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367163349550144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052607872777480635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808511300592432,0.0,0.23509474078047146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21636161935097864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915848972703915,0.15968933353445655,0.08305081808705661,0.10399972283628174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465297974342834,0.0,0.11250452898236088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095510706604162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439649043661239,0.09195964176905663,0.10243002053462368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091238412844055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002677997316375,0.0,0.0,0.12326986207157,0.0,0.0,0.2029775845316589,0.0,0.0,0.2596515793513719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899812913043825,0.0,0.08548729586371856,0.1255802101046644,0.0,0.0,0.1028945442159754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547277550655219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998220780359605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kitsune532,2020/03/02,Is it bad enough to get help? How bad do things have to be before you should get help? How badly does it have to be affecting your life before a therapist will listen to you? How do you know that you’re not just being a weak piece of shit?,2.122647058823528,3.322787490196077,3.2648529411764717,94.36433823529413,76.05882352941177,6.668627450980392,16.67156862745098,7.1686216300943375,-0.2969254901960787,186,2,44,2,4,60,34,51,0.231,0.6459999999999999,0.12300000000000001,-0.8340000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,4,0,0,4,5,1,0,2,0,10,3,1,4,0,8,14,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,4,0,5,9,2,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,1,0,0,32,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5981446058473922,0.0,0.0,0.4063891947914111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089686871401598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.246736203794998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495181657630328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201147926212184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13123396306578247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866601193597894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24511678959633534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772561805890181,0.15864294507594873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Captain_Criesalot,2020/03/02,"Sudden and Intense Mood Swing Hi, I'm not sure where else to post this, but I was having a really good day all day today, and then out of nowhere I had a very strong sense of loneliness and sadness. I just feel so alone and I don't know what happened but I haven't been able to stop crying and I can't get this knotted feeling out of my stomach. Why would this be happening?",1.7412115732368894,3.45951541772152,3.0013019891500896,93.64582278481014,78.36708860759494,6.033273056057867,22.678119349005428,6.868970318607317,0.4924777576853527,294,9,66,3,7,95,58,79,0.266,0.652,0.08199999999999999,-0.9524,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,2,0,9,1,1,0,2,18,16,9,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,2,7,3,7,11,1,10,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,6,42,11,0,0.24337541106699956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25206352768177265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673364610282079,0.31391401238561073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20330892669582865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461158408967397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715360733285172,0.0,0.0,0.20413174793483074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4304321444938192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133752761105562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23308636862481305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591252031308606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20347274128153264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293784447009655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306914325516373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20081020246524728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196084538643399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288690924032446,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,honeydewminoes,2020/03/02,"advice??? i’m very easily overwhelmed and stressed out about the smallest things. it’s gotten to the point where i don’t get anything done because i’m too scared to even though i don’t even have that much on my plate. this is also interfering with my relationships. i barely ever text my friends because i’m too nervous. instead i sit in bed all day browsing the internet and trying to forget about everything i’m behind on. i want to be able to work on things consistently and not be afraid to interact with people one on one, any advice?? im sorry if this isn’t as major as anything else on here, but i didn’t know where else to go",3.515625,5.039603062500003,4.705125000000002,84.12737500000003,73.0625,7.307500000000001,26.08125,7.908726449838941,1.4912537500000005,504,17,100,7,10,166,80,128,0.07400000000000001,0.873,0.053,-0.3558,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,13,6,0,5,3,0,9,0,0,0,2,14,18,9,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,5,0,2,3,0,9,1,21,13,3,14,0,1,0,0,3,10,0,1,2,69,15,1,0.1724498811816031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370320560614822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13790810767650194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727183276189256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838231170606233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21024769389275452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121590693941552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764761017686835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28811949488358923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278030402137684,0.15599079047078127,0.0,0.0,0.15498683357349538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332343504204804,0.0,0.09009794531102393,0.0,0.09800724158457637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18627546422431712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477394474339768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267705050061194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23371300505331646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955503414630393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16302087844420984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18514663482263385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17265241518779414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19304352330308314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19754075624619727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22913607665755345,0.0,0.1694311326850543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708214941480835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14228921238741016,0.10171540794326496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255455673683792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bAfooneryyy,2020/03/02,"Inside a serotonin deficient mind So spring semester started and I thought yeah let’s go to the gym and get some endorphins to feel less empty and so I did for a month and truly I felt on top of the world for a bit and I stopped for about the last 2 weeks in February and things just kind of went down hill last night I had my first sleepless night in a month and truly I hated it being alone with my thoughts I just let them consume me and I honestly couldn’t help but realize that I wasn’t really feeling okay I was just distracted from my thoughts and I don’t think it’s bad to be distracted sometimes but I wasn’t really acknowledging how I really felt and I don’t know what to even do anymore because I don’t know even know what I feel I just am so accustomed to repressing my emotions and now that I’m confronted with my emotions I can’t even begin to describe what I feel because I don’t even know what they are. 

I’m not really sure what I’m asking here maybe I just want to hear other people go through this too.",3.18675,4.340785706976746,4.469229651162792,86.95407703488372,73.32558139534882,8.351744186046512,26.925872093023266,8.841846274778883,1.8691453488372096,817,29,177,16,16,270,111,215,0.133,0.7809999999999999,0.085,-0.9129,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,2,2,17,10,2,3,7,2,18,0,0,1,1,45,45,17,0,2,8,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,12,13,0,2,16,1,0,3,9,6,0,1,11,7,29,4,21,29,3,22,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,1,13,120,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339070760988348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815256643479707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137764945529337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994749873624295,0.14525044924633376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13006749140918786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680277115639998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31475725909848634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409583650720781,0.0,0.2287817143434337,0.0,0.0,0.10133845071086912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06224452116594095,0.0,0.1354173794345172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762379496928566,0.0,0.0,0.1342768253006791,0.0,0.07985547634942683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406356150050195,0.2618998153263477,0.19422622243700155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436527015682593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119689813891592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202950956098929,0.0,0.1901891208823881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22360528627237133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259506726513424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30529059691586913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783021298391355,0.0,0.08432626390475942,0.0,0.0,0.09960443606005512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228585453203324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791497815191945,0.07633861550179631,0.0,0.2837460330362698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027049108357655,0.0,0.09556506153136204,0.0,0.0,0.11044182400035307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway19474810,2020/03/02,"Where/how should i get help? I am not sure what steps i should take to better myself. I think i have had some mental health problems for a while, i always put it off but i don't wanna hurt anymore people around me or myself anymore i guess. I am strongly against taking prescribed anti depressants/anxiety pills and i think thats why i have put figuring anything out because i feel like all anyone can do is just prescribe me shit. I did do therapy in early high school, though it did not help at the time i would be willing to try it again if i knew where to go. I am an 18 year old community college student in Austin Texas if that means anything. If anyone has any sort of ideas or things i can do to help myself please let me know and thanks for the read, have a good day!",2.75519593613933,4.33802914465409,3.6516981132075483,90.6660522496372,75.16352201257861,6.150169327527817,23.551523947750358,6.67199483983844,0.5937582002902757,610,18,129,5,13,195,106,159,0.068,0.741,0.191,0.9649,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,5,9,1,0,5,0,23,3,1,0,2,31,35,10,0,8,9,0,1,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,8,1,0,4,3,3,0,0,4,1,23,6,15,25,2,19,0,1,0,0,3,8,1,8,8,90,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745118046808277,0.0,0.0,0.09598935185605377,0.0,0.10798218907121904,0.0,0.2799730693826977,0.1973958887783051,0.0,0.23231492513406884,0.12565671341760026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604598133539827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248389710500207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910324548681114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137154856036854,0.1008402267453316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374697888048762,0.0,0.08022089682868999,0.11839302100474168,0.0,0.0,0.1554967070520152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003977540500013,0.0,0.0,0.2838370358155249,0.14913662691792864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110794815965678,0.1593453385249017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757437838659208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433921492322674,0.0,0.06896056463073473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15375775269999545,0.0,0.0,0.14224972321108925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481170565818365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785819807329912,0.0,0.0,0.15494436765854794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506502132967435,0.0,0.2837968974913905,0.0,0.0,0.1411918915612264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285507352358526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14489223780829835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303568551319228,0.0,0.2122600212364174,0.0,0.0,0.1299553562556749,0.1614215500316906,0.0,0.09377624177604203,0.18089117434667096,0.13868278705677614,0.0,0.08230785373031654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583409222451493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736925321131426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027153387070988,0.0,0.0,0.09089835062281844
mentalhealth,spaghettieggrolls,2020/03/02,"Fuck eating disorders I want to eat but I also don't. When I eat I feel guilty, then hopeless, and then I spiral into despair and/or panic. I feel like people don't understand it because sometimes I will be eating a lot and I will seem just fine and other times I will do anything to avoid food.",4.360500000000002,5.060132050000004,5.403333333333336,83.04000000000002,70.16666666666666,7.333333333333332,26.666666666666664,7.1686216300943375,1.3386666666666671,233,7,45,2,4,77,40,60,0.306,0.593,0.1,-0.9387,0,1,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,2,1,0,7,6,0,0,0,13,13,8,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,4,5,1,4,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,2,9,2,3,9,1,5,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,2,5,32,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460006139007222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502389889478854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129255885215658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20924025012709804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7472559440174632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846250608163304,0.13042755391416194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22076353835392648,0.0,0.0,0.16878238828068726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919414455543752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521390144338013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142057524237896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657057423503704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16620424602174033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18056571915773734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064576347798306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19006109381772013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10768411120334333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DaveFawkes360,2020/03/02,"I've finally recognized that I really need some mental health counseling, but my insurance doesn't cover it; I can't afford it on my own and it's sending me deeper into a depressive spiral. Over the last several months as my stress and anxiety have skyrocketed, I've noticed my mood plummeting. I am depressed and have extreme mood swings. I have become short tempered and snippy with my loved ones, to the point where friends have privately asked my SO if I'm okay. 

I realized I needed help the other night when my SO pointed out all the minor ways I had hurt her with some of the tones I'd used or words I'd said, or been short with her, or snippy, and I hadn't even noticed. It freaked me out - I couldn't even recognize when I was hurting the most important person in my life and I couldn't figure out how to talk to her about it or how to address it or fix it. 

I decided I need to find a therapist and get some help. I looked online through my insurance and that kind of mental health Care is not covered. I looked into the TalkSpace app - which is something I really think would be conducive to my life and would be super helpful - but I just cannot afford that extra cost every month. Much of my anxiety and depression, I know, stems from financial struggles and stress and adding one more financial strain onto my life is hard to think about. 

Anyway. I'm typing this out because I'm depressed and scared and don't know where to turn. I feel like I had made an important first step in at least recognizing the need for help with my mental care, and then right when I decided to take steps to try and fix things, I hit this brick wall. It's bringing me down and I'm freaking out. 

Advice? Suggestions? I need help and don't know what to do or where to go.",5.209289772727272,5.618833167613636,5.735227272727276,82.4415909090909,68.17613636363637,9.354545454545457,29.06818181818182,9.339509955726095,2.3046886363636365,1393,46,282,26,22,450,178,352,0.14,0.721,0.139,0.469,2,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,2,16,24,1,5,11,1,25,6,0,4,1,70,55,36,0,10,11,0,2,1,1,2,5,1,1,1,17,29,0,0,11,0,1,5,9,14,0,3,7,5,42,8,39,41,10,39,0,6,2,1,16,23,0,11,11,190,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768019748925203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13728183689758475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838826437955952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05469675358955663,0.09909643506207387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18296533708503335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091269752097076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185276901432282,0.0,0.07559887735277354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045368673171324286,0.0641009951726282,0.0,0.09829155562729848,0.08200886326175083,0.07632175041716431,0.0,0.0,0.06932286675478057,0.0,0.046878660330193084,0.0,0.05099392857719672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037777840963528,0.0,0.0,0.1907512354811992,0.0,0.0,0.3007106232940973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192109243863364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343687524611276,0.14793485739684076,0.07313949033817006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013052597470997,0.04383608568889981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069618320710598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809821313441277,0.08490186809262082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271271171688947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323848957845414,0.0,0.06595967781011958,0.3326572116890569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842027223187461,0.0,0.0,0.2043095953277684,0.0,0.0,0.12160269072531868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834616578918104,0.0,0.0,0.16964205700661514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496284272688702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662637783435475,0.0853509355199319,0.0,0.08983239183575216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136598357827246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06907623736433732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20556397776813426,0.09380215457735357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746354622436153,0.07211917330224599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041799764320396,0.05961063967630927,0.11498689231283195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06091875119014675,0.09759722310027938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749532929356287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122112553422183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747898960661475,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anderson3078,2020/03/02,"I’ve been struggling... So I’ve been struggling for quite a while now... in July 2019 I was officially diagnosed with PCOS (Polycystic Ovarian Syndrome). Since then, I have fallen down a very unhealthy and mentally ill path... My very, very supportive boyfriend has been nothing but helpful and loving during this time. We decided to try a new lifestyle in which he thrived in and is still going strong. However, my mental health got the best of me and I went backwards after losing 20lbs. This was completely heartbreaking for me as I want to be on this journey with my boyfriend and I want to look “good” for him... I have done lots of reading and experimenting with “low carb” or “no artificial sugars” but I’m a college student on a SERIOUS budget and those kinds of meal plans tend to take most of my money. 
Any tips or tricks from someone struggling with PCOS and/or mental illness on how to get through the day...

P.S. this is my first post so please be kind...",4.13520251396648,6.486405100558656,4.330666899441344,83.94002269553074,73.41340782122907,7.380027932960894,29.06459497206704,8.278499904357787,2.1802427374301674,759,32,139,13,16,236,118,179,0.174,0.691,0.135,-0.6172,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,1,0,0,6,5,15,1,3,7,0,13,7,0,1,0,22,25,17,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,12,2,0,1,1,2,4,1,8,0,1,8,2,15,7,27,15,3,23,0,3,1,1,5,9,0,4,9,91,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059657501637916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980988504403788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396823460602329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591816140973217,0.0,0.0,0.13521908785088746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13633393472196192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031818483062596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331987429938555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960380057984587,0.0,0.07571400740699206,0.1117415838473064,0.1065510344184882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161039224750732,0.0,0.0,0.08929693002563367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27746362995981905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187421963651624,0.14904306298899395,0.0,0.11326188882218075,0.12023944543008093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.402773978699592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12866812422915627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783157882314078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623943965153222,0.0,0.0,0.1275913240681638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14169963264017027,0.13325959127959666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020388823583807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11287987235091397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639249041543304,0.0,0.0,0.4178225069898304,0.0,0.0,0.1511804933979163,0.0,0.0,0.10016752152760022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776837170032991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045003802468428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32977011616040186,0.1571573901256201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12349955545326435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadroomate,2020/03/02,"I don't know what is wrong with me but I hate feeling this way Hello. For some reason, especially in the past few years, I just feel like people don't value me even if they say they do and genuinely mean it. I don't know what's wrong with me. It's like there's a little piece of my mind that says you're terrible and you don't matter and no one likes you, and I try to convince myself that it isn't that way but it never seems to work out. I just don't know if this is normal, but I just feel so hopeless and even typing this out makes me want to cry. Sometimes I want to stop existing. I won't do anything drastic for sure though. I just feel so stuck and frustrated, and whenever something bad happens in my life I get so upset and stuck on it for so long. Like I had a situation with my potential roommates recently which really hurt me and I can't get over it, and I keep chasing the toxic people in my life for the sake of normalcy/optimism. I don't want to live like this and I don't know if it is normal or not but the way I've been feeling is absolutely terrible and that is all I know. I feel like if I go into therapy or whatever, then they'll just say this is a normal part of life and to just move on and that scares me a lot because my life is a terrible way to live. I literally feel like throwing up and my head hurts sometimes in these situations. I just want to feel happy and I don't know how.",2.023563596491229,3.235842825657897,4.022368421052634,88.78491228070177,76.33552631578948,7.566666666666666,23.19298245614036,8.212053250817874,1.0853337719298248,1105,32,254,19,24,378,131,304,0.214,0.652,0.134,-0.9885,0,0,1,0,0,1,21.0,0,2,3,1,16,23,2,2,9,0,23,5,1,3,3,75,52,33,0,11,18,0,8,7,0,2,4,3,0,0,21,22,0,2,17,0,0,3,14,13,0,1,4,11,40,10,29,46,6,26,0,3,0,0,9,12,0,9,14,174,61,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075547415975743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717909871856702,0.05241354342958576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444667475286818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357998102682156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3477987654553468,0.18427566942483228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984360269624883,0.0,0.04886528568372681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603318417142102,0.09152893889037103,0.0,0.08488896134868178,0.08824185678757188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18409001514085893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07642433563337167,0.0,0.0,0.2835192059515334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429251933364753,0.2940436316925793,0.08617608252270964,0.15184653478754864,0.07609094952069984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309842318375634,0.0,0.0,0.0573933398011874,0.0,0.0,0.09365909393680596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868168360350106,0.0,0.0,0.09138476056026243,0.0,0.0,0.06631425753287458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527309352030337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05826331082931865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310961956030933,0.08207910064020246,0.11921753543987584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05508197063458637,0.08840333438160995,0.08489638927086361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051278942104244,0.08608251243206788,0.0,0.0,0.07827435685627816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19329368733533134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619278347333843,0.17007586599820662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188441016604802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103657570190162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832737440785566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447641795150301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837581577767581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20285653946480028,0.27299254974464554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259557882248235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880146137422444,0.0,0.05536928714283641
mentalhealth,BreakingGreen,2020/03/02,"Very confused and a little scared So long story short, talked to a long time friend the other day, and without going too much into it, he had a few rough couple of days and his mental health went down the drain. It really shocked me to hear what he was going through since I always saw him as a well put together person. We started talking and talking about my own mental health and i stated getting really anxious and it seemed like i couldn't verbalize what i was trying to say. So he told me to write down how I felt and he suggested I talk to a medical professional about it. So I wrote it down, and was mortified about how on paper I sound insane. Ill type out what i wrote, basically my symptoms and odd things I've done over the past few years.

​

\-Very Impulsive with money decisions although I'm more financially literate than most. I budget and have a plan but it all goes down the window in burst of impulsiveness and recklessness.

\-Its hard to keep my focus on something for more than a few days, maybe if im lucky a few weeks

\-My interest are like a rollercoaster, im very obsessive about things i like and will go overboard with research, investing time and money into it, but then will lose interest after a few days, weeks or maybe hours

\-I have burst of hyper efficiency, and then i dont

\-i feel like i have no stability in my behavior

\-I lose interest in romantic relationships, and ill have a really high sex drive for short period of times, then no sex drive at all for a few weeks at a time

\- If i drink, i usually black out. I don't drink often, I'm a very social and nice person, easy going but when i drink i go overboard and end up in bad situations cuz i dont see things as bad ideas

\-My college performance is all over the place. Acing exams one week and studying super efficiently and then for a few weeks my performance drops, and then it comes back up, and then it comes back down

\-I gained like 50 pounds in the last 2 year

\-cant sleep for more than 4-5 hours a time unless I drink heavily, and sometimes i wake up in a panic for some reason

\-Im constantly worrying about everything, its like my mind is either blank or i have 50 tabs open in my head, no in-between

\-I pick up hobbies for a few weeks and then just drop them

\-Ill be in a good routine, eating healthy, doing well in school and then BOOM, i go into these states where i dont see the point and redundant of life, all depressed and everything seems mundane, like theres no point of it. Never suicidal, but indifferent 

\*Then i started thinking of examples of stuff ive done through out the years that maybe seemed like  good idea at first but werent\*

\-Signed up for a marathon and ran it without training. Ended up completing 19 miles. Seemed doable at the time

\-Bid on a car on ebay (a classic car) cross country because it looked nice, won it, and then my coworkers had me email the seller and explain that i couldn't buy the car. Seemed like a cool idea, driving cross country in a convertible from the 80's, maybe sight see, but the people around me though buying a car i had seen for no more than 10 minutes on a loan wasn't a good idea.

\-Went to visit a friend that lived a few hours from me, saw an old BMW for sale, thought it was cool so i called the guy, bought it for 800$ 2 hours later. Found out it had a bad motor so that afternoon i ordered an engine from a scrap yard, youtubed how to change an engine and use tools, and then spent the next 2 weeks traveling to my buddies house to fix the car. Did it. cost me like 4,000 total, sold the car for 1,600 a few months later. All this on credit by the way. 

\-Was driving from work with  buddy and he saw a nice car for sale and said it looked nice, so i applied for a loan and bought it a few hours later. 

\-Saw a motorcycle for sale like at 2pm on a resale lot, thought it looked really nice and i could get into motorcycles. Called the guy up, applied for a loan, bought it that same night. I dont even like riding motorcycles.

\-Dropped a whole semester of classes after convincing myself that we should do things we dont like. seemed logical at the time.

\-Started playing guitar for a week and got super into it. Spent a ton of time on it, after a week i completely lost interest. Now i have a nice guitar i dont know how to play as decoration.

\-Started writing a book about how to diversify income streams. Did a ton of research on it. Then asked myself why the fuck was i writing a book about that, got a chapter in and then scrapped it. 

\-Almost married a girl so shed have a place to keep her dogs. Seemed like the nice thing to do and she didn't seem like a psycho, plus her dogs needed a home. Seemed like a good idea at the time.

\-Got super into cycling, spent thousands on a performance bike, cycling gear, then two months in i stopped completely for no reason.

\-I go from either not sleeping more than 4 hours a night to sleeping 12 hours a day to avoid people and ding things and worrying about things

\-Once i went home with a chick after talking to her at a taco stand for 3 minutes. i was very drunk, she offered to drive, seemed like a good idea at the time.

\-Blew all my savings on i dont remember what a few years back

\-went to strip club and bought me and some guy i barely knew long hour lap dances all in my credit card. cost me 800$, seemed like a good idea at the time.

Those are the ones i can think of, i go through highs and lows and make very reckless decisions when i look back at it. I didn't really think this was odd behavior but after writing things down, my life is a shit show of wild decisions that seem logical at the time. I'm i going crazy? is this normal, are other people like this? Im going to see a doctor next week and maybe he can tell me more. Please share your thoughts.

​

TLDR: Friend had a mental break down, made me self reflect, think im going crazy. Seeing a doctor soon about it.",4.327181114040869,5.2920580777027055,4.870949241924851,85.85776862228083,70.41891891891892,8.140474620962427,26.094429795649308,8.407314429234152,1.5297538645352682,4660,138,965,70,82,1488,452,1184,0.08900000000000001,0.736,0.175,0.9990000000000001,3,1,5,0,0,1,179.0,3,1,1,15,39,71,2,5,94,2,56,26,6,12,9,173,148,92,1,8,18,0,4,19,3,3,11,5,4,8,58,67,6,4,41,18,25,37,24,16,2,5,54,27,91,55,154,87,38,216,0,5,16,3,56,76,2,24,113,604,149,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031011874938336712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02576943249626786,0.0671117337473603,0.0752636213134901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034987164639570065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027569771382567557,0.02895266997150679,0.0,0.0,0.0952557463596426,0.0775757028526701,0.01887895974106649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06324744819771247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03276204106232099,0.053355642303722674,0.0974140329202242,0.03346745282224205,0.0,0.024726940068021917,0.03426759831083531,0.0,0.09986509677230662,0.0,0.026674324054289062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339799699628793,0.0,0.06338590752392825,0.2540753932679818,0.1213548218168658,0.0,0.031689932886975206,0.0,0.0,0.05486026691519863,0.0,0.0,0.020455322698007924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055667486996017417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015659308790687904,0.02212489823998263,0.02973595466997069,0.0,0.0,0.02634297575146176,0.0,0.03395688991058638,0.07178178912150464,0.028631167673888024,0.032360982435265584,0.0,0.1936099471385597,0.15585646482148371,0.07430835941179527,0.0,0.0,0.09199519149759007,0.0,0.0,0.02774294163889093,0.0,0.03178404574015442,0.06583909754921606,0.034905321011579934,0.0,0.0,0.06544278609659478,0.06213065700306146,0.0,0.24399285499452936,0.03573509922036619,0.0,0.2447286821506055,0.16726399822645302,0.0,0.0,0.05505492898408987,0.0,0.0,0.01702024363915579,0.02524459685373489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04374990360317218,0.28747618843340544,0.03103996956005683,0.027346983522739853,0.08222214404893373,0.10402764292916038,0.06929477849348345,0.033807297389326516,0.02632949612108459,0.0,0.029304462229874706,0.02067264452302513,0.0,0.15556710423958572,0.0,0.0,0.031198909694285206,0.09363110592737976,0.0,0.031270764102290516,0.0,0.04943974734615923,0.0,0.022766435303551952,0.022963783752797475,0.023885891246863727,0.0,0.06587366656951027,0.058126294539254914,0.030343920284840682,0.0,0.0,0.03249769373044963,0.03298192603151828,0.04197200294254722,0.0,0.0,0.036336497408471766,0.0,0.0,0.029564267843311762,0.0644118744334351,0.054083433210678745,0.06471389459969952,0.033995643186735834,0.05855311978206847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031133297100159888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920053463528836,0.06368441748299647,0.0,0.03325007566354952,0.03508285233043916,0.0,0.02945946093317707,0.02462850250254459,0.03100626632500333,0.03134318581766658,0.12339497792509832,0.3383259368066486,0.03230835340117397,0.0,0.031790150823122525,0.02561861609415168,0.03481145809487637,0.09297677932955313,0.031569906485948325,0.0,0.023842137214422708,0.030630016757221733,0.0,0.08768260061888572,0.0,0.0,0.02589221786461188,0.0,0.0,0.035453118792532365,0.033876037079358906,0.0,0.0,0.03218957770407845,0.0,0.12446213714519795,0.02706905213809799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16460016987964507,0.0793770294673863,0.030427763307368818,0.07375990865672688,0.2167055287648608,0.0,0.0,0.02959306060612345,0.0,0.021026524898077582,0.0,0.030253086033256806,0.0,0.0,0.02674804455182883,0.034108962505555354,0.15332043434180365,0.0,0.0245824600809716,0.24842180642669026,0.0,0.05569130752346085,0.11483760689767335,0.027945511996117858,0.034576780305859485,0.0,0.05970774470723021,0.0,0.02254645145573852,0.06290286071256257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752636213134901,0.07977438459320897
mentalhealth,PositiveSupermarket8,2020/03/02,"No knowledge of mental health. What is my problem? This sounds so crazy but I don't know why I believe it to be true.
While driving home I imagined that if I won the lottery, I would immediately contact a girl that I have/had feelings for. We would fly to the Lakers game, and sit court side, and be known as the young rich couple. That thought was kinda cool to think about. Then I thought to myself what if she said no and I had to choose someone else to go to the game with? Who would I choose? I immediately thought of like 3 of my guy friends. For whatever reason in my head I was like what?? That's gay why wouldn't you choose another girl? And it just spiraled out of control in my head that I must be gay, and I don't really have feelings for that girl, I just like her to try and gain ""clout"". Then I looked back on previous experiences with girls, and remember how I felt when I was ""in love"" with a woman, and convinced myself that I would never be able to be emotionally attached to a female again. Obviously, being straight this made me extremely anxious, and the thought of me being gay, or not being able to love a woman again has just been running wild in my head. It's like because at the moment I felt what I thought was gay, that must be how I truly feel. And that because I thought I would never feel love again that I will never feel love again. Now I'm almost frightened that one day I could wake up and instantly be gay, or that I will never feel love for a female again. It's like now I have to check myself by looking at ever female I see to make sure I think she's attractive. And that's not enough, later, I will somehow in my mind convince myself that she was never attractive, and I was just saying that at the time to convince myself of being straight. It's like a never ending cycle of thoughts in my head. I KNOW I'm not gay because I've never had any kinda attraction towards a male, but for some reason I still fear that I've been lying to myself, or will turn gay in the future. I don't know if this is Anxiety, Depression, OCD, or what, but I know what I'm feeling is not me.

It's crazy that I think like this now, because just last week I was thinking that I was the happiest I've ever been, and everything was going great. I knew in my heart that I had such a bright future, and was ready to live such a great life with a beautiful wife and family. Now it feels like I don't even know who I truly am.",3.1585497823867605,4.232968445328034,4.3270012358282735,88.25358390199347,73.29423459244532,7.1078179571221325,24.92660254688088,7.432916251226849,1.0037219816237708,1900,57,411,21,37,623,194,503,0.062,0.6779999999999999,0.261,0.9990000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,55.0,1,1,0,3,27,31,0,1,19,1,51,20,6,7,14,110,96,34,0,13,19,1,10,8,1,12,2,3,1,8,38,22,0,1,36,2,2,4,18,3,0,1,29,18,65,28,50,43,2,57,0,1,4,12,28,18,0,12,42,294,103,0,0.13222693665348706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662030884585202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04495942558961683,0.06932573608008655,0.05057662230943826,0.0746894007586404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050837176202413854,0.0,0.1612086265958224,0.0,0.0,0.0744872388403748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415187647076109,0.052786224757024686,0.0731532952052767,0.0,0.042637717639978916,0.0,0.056943433392810064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05522931929203213,0.07436875323802873,0.058556909420448576,0.06831288602560863,0.0,0.04366732229884409,0.11960683433806715,0.0,0.0,0.059418522311030016,0.06467165820349383,0.06232589399045335,0.07439603250589026,0.2674316485876546,0.047231474982721185,0.12695859514002036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05107910162769296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514761527112765,0.0,0.0,0.14578066446256266,0.0,0.0654627279881594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714059689572516,0.07027552522617113,0.0,0.07834477829113001,0.0,0.0,0.06631719929443687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181671165879052,0.05389130073336768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04669789788672293,0.2583976088333548,0.0,0.058379403787404235,0.0,0.11103732458396036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983499320351334,0.06255816228755279,0.04413125348759642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662682601965307,0.0,0.06675575617874885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35693547777736123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044800197168210217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326166036976456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04235398074222163,0.13595131324498605,0.0,0.0,0.07489367156379469,0.0,0.06288904821064148,0.05257608361374021,0.0,0.0,0.05268387451681485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05601772716693585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052798301207985975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06231116147719686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16945136383572001,0.0,0.3674069623375151,0.03855129505175268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044886705191819885,0.07191246857915047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05303223638878003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931424374542217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23482555505621994,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snuffbumbles,2020/03/02,"Coping with emotional triggers caused by relationship trauma? Hello, first post here. 

Last year I dealt with some issues in my relationship that have caused me to have an violent aversion to sexual content/nudity (this was NOT caused by sexual abuse). 

It's been affecting me slowly, but has gotten to a point where accidentally seeing something remotely sexual causes a panic/anxiety attack. Dread follows, spiraling, the usual. It causes every insecurity I'm dealing with (dealing with through therapy, mindfulness, etc) to surface. The feeling is awful, and my first instinct is to hurt myself (pick my skin, pull my hair, hit my head on the wall). It's been happening so often, and I feel myself relapsing, causing all my progress with this issue to feel useless. Sometimes I don't recognize myself anymore. 

I have no idea how to deal with these triggers, as pornography/nudity/sexual content is everywhere. Is there any tips you have had that have helped (even temporarily)?",8.300729450190527,9.889153814371259,8.490190528034839,61.232640174197094,61.75449101796407,11.82123026673925,36.738704409363095,11.567385478589935,5.1254359281437125,785,36,108,24,11,257,113,167,0.201,0.762,0.037000000000000005,-0.9848,0,0,1,0,1,2,35.0,0,1,0,3,7,7,2,2,6,1,15,3,3,11,1,29,24,6,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,7,0,2,5,6,16,0,19,18,3,14,0,2,1,0,8,6,0,2,5,81,24,0,0.0,0.12864838153660887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383745567592882,0.0,0.08306265169174658,0.0,0.10768120995336697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352430812287317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6692433666495101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335820600075276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12213678108368005,0.0,0.0,0.12109430680570225,0.07171541745568992,0.0,0.0914825057669515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16470244203496792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18471451474341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601606716329993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143339767051932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277822711920623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11623608461541605,0.12257249520907434,0.0,0.2266565704704104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850639164164864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963385593386732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739408314394013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10264226799299038,0.0,0.10398868537594128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23314646186216875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08652341969355365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358943286358816,0.10738742530973897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241695700110406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958444856529195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992132778636015
mentalhealth,throwawaypikachutail,2020/03/02,"Thinking with third person He I have noticed that the majority of my thoughts use He and I mainly just use I for when I’m practicing something I’m going to say to someone in advance because obviously I can’t say He there. I am worried the way I think about myself is weird or abnormal. My thoughts are like He seems a little sad right now, Oh he’s cold, give him his coat and I call him my sweet baby boy and feel sorry for him and try to help him out by observing him and helping him grow. When I see old photos or somehow memories are brought up I feel like I am learning backstory or lore on a story character, that I’m this other being possessing his body and he has his own mind that I can’t access. I think he’s so cute and I love seeing pictures of him when he was little. I love understanding him, I like to look through his brain and physical memories to try to figure out why he is the way he is. Sometimes I stare into his eyes in the mirror for a long time because I like it when we’re there for each other and I hope he’ll tell me secrets. I get confused by his emotions. When he’s crying I ask Why is he crying? Hey Sweetie? And I can’t tell if he’s really feeling something or lying or has done something or been somewhere or seen something.",2.5794713018287148,3.9923498441064673,4.324703965236285,86.36287705956909,75.27376425855513,6.986710121310883,26.972478725330443,7.62386473244151,1.4757109904037655,991,38,207,13,21,335,138,263,0.075,0.778,0.147,0.9640000000000001,0,0,4,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,12,12,0,1,7,0,18,5,3,2,1,44,46,24,0,2,9,0,3,4,0,1,0,2,0,2,7,15,0,0,13,0,0,4,3,3,0,1,7,13,40,9,24,37,4,25,0,1,6,2,43,10,0,12,13,129,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10538231950984056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743178569744502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521166049604152,0.0,0.1258379759108298,0.1151044584266808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476454426690352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535644149022466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680004505242512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17099089140043608,0.08053050367179028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05889397064245979,0.10813574402917443,0.06406400932568514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511138969878102,0.0,0.0,0.11196099998241392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22028625608822164,0.2259594015317267,0.0,0.09975775709662386,0.09466030521369093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20347677311388887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381974986028999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12833774711621407,0.11828554490503022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842680561768333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221428936793083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626622464951172,0.0,0.17928631261478015,0.0,0.0,0.17965388342297586,0.10262027648950324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551121968883236,0.34712373321015594,0.11148754901285267,0.12618600296468374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970526037186143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21668818858432545,0.0,0.1789815416846295,0.06573064273036543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15306525907085528,0.0,0.0,0.11735032325781028,0.0,0.1947157882156164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789511409580047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20343290459492705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144773413335958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,donkeydiaperdays,2020/03/02,"Thinking with third person He I have noticed that the majority of my thoughts use He and I mainly just use I for when I’m practicing something I’m going to say to someone in advance. I am worried the way I think about myself might be weird or abnormal. My thoughts are like He seems a little sad right now, Oh he’s cold, give him his coat and I call him my sweet baby boy and feel sorry for him and try to help him out by observing him and helping him grow. When I see old photos or somehow memories are brought up I feel like I am learning backstory or lore on a story character, that I’m this other being possessing his body and he has his own mind that I can’t access. I think he’s so cute and I love seeing pictures of him when he was little. I love understanding him, I like to look through his brain and physical memories to try to figure out why he is the way he is. Sometimes I stare into his eyes in the mirror for hours because I like it when we’re there for each other and I hope he’ll tell me secrets. I get confused by his emotions. When he’s crying I ask Why is he crying? Hey Sweetie? And I can’t tell if he’s really feeling something or lying or has done something or been somewhere or seen something.",3.0557853294654014,4.209033165354331,4.582739328636553,86.01723373394117,73.64566929133858,7.2371322005801915,27.541649399088268,7.669130373188453,1.5378377952755908,960,36,200,12,19,322,138,254,0.077,0.773,0.15,0.9640000000000001,0,0,4,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,11,12,0,1,6,0,18,5,3,2,0,44,46,24,0,2,9,0,3,4,0,2,0,1,0,2,7,15,0,0,13,0,0,4,2,3,0,1,7,12,39,9,24,35,4,24,0,1,6,2,41,10,0,13,12,126,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677531446798433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962421307480822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12686676936613528,0.0,0.12750136372391005,0.11662596536441015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509189410570929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688127926313288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847614996520354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17325113249891627,0.08159499519288556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05967245990471552,0.10956513509712963,0.06491083868381878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531113942680804,0.0,0.0,0.11344095515145602,0.1124784598692502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231981073883878,0.2289462432385985,0.0,0.0,0.0959115713512398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20616642845992192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12116373367836425,0.11532427489285735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13003417812574145,0.11984910099717533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972785919677847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316885310749692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09753871861434404,0.0,0.09082810332078947,0.0,0.0,0.18202863618020454,0.10397676141428083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677373362942067,0.3517121842184737,0.11296124587578997,0.12785399116930574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996573412566175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195524788712657,0.0,0.181347407100452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508855040800182,0.0,0.0,0.1189015171335477,0.0,0.19728963658521895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813166045221778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061219800654552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599055873136345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OrangeRedFed,2020/03/02,"If counseling isn’t working what do you do? I started seeing this guy and he wants a relationship. However, I told him that I feel like I have too much emotional baggage to get into a relationship and I don’t want to put him through that because I like him so much. 

I have major trust issues from past relationships. One person was emotionally abusive and would use things id tell him about my mental health against me and tell me I was faking depression and suicidal thoughts for attention. My most recent one cheated on me all the time because my depression and anxiety made him feel rejected so he’d seek comfort in other women. I’d spent so much time thinking I wasn’t good enough. And I deserved to be treated badly. And it was all my fault because I was a bad girlfriend. So I started counseling and gained back my confidence and learned to love myself again. But I still don’t know how to trust another man. I’m scared to put myself in that position again. Can anyone relate? Or tell me how they were able to move past these things and be happy in a relationship again?",4.504647129186601,6.1568765311004805,5.312987440191389,80.23684958133973,70.77033492822966,8.669976076555024,30.287380382775122,9.188382445141503,2.6906289473684213,861,36,161,18,16,280,119,209,0.172,0.6829999999999999,0.145,-0.8496,1,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,2,13,18,1,1,5,0,18,2,0,4,2,32,35,20,1,4,3,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,0,4,10,12,0,0,7,0,1,3,4,9,0,2,10,3,32,9,17,21,8,20,0,3,1,1,23,5,0,3,14,116,42,2,0.10689055171164698,0.12664782490593735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208406342855498,0.08177097948710405,0.0,0.0,0.0747403590859025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219223630626131,0.17849829171579493,0.1954784646035651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841293511219636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24047496720133946,0.0,0.11044651356368844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080941492942612,0.0763626315005427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05584590152450936,0.0,0.0,0.0896547233878532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105838451503131,0.0,0.11378697991878085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361965804193948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11156596494977347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058744251791294576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444264863198448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647289620553053,0.10114242453497724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772053519926747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136077402493202,0.2357305634777169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14486360837806694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20407825305359986,0.0,0.0933327067938306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149090556773825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554152444300886,0.4590417994641657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701608947087184,0.0,0.08517793054779974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15131536532830814,0.0,0.0853629326730758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692091453397058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28028116076327464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202666585299434,0.06849114948551396,0.0,0.08485915826855868,0.12465748058821592,0.0,0.0,0.10213850285443872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231911701090867,0.0,0.0,0.1260936336764574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781759470640562,0.0,0.0,0.07593198109620165,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,panic_erin,2020/03/02,"I’m not sure what to do Hi everyone, my name is Erin and I’m a junior in college right now. I’m expecting to graduate next year with a degree in applied behavior analysis. Anyways, some background is when I was in high school, I experienced some bullying from other kids, three intimate relationships that ended so badly I lost friends as well, and a lot of pressure from my parents to do well in school. It would make me want to stay home in bed sometimes, but I still got up and got stuff done. Currently, I have only been diagnosed with OCD, an anxiety disorder, and I have a history of disordered eating. 

Now I am a college student and I live by myself, and ever since I moved into my apartment last August, I have had trouble sleeping and staying awake and I sleep through most of my classes (even the ones at 2pm). I have never experienced this lack of motivation before and I am halfway through the semester at school and barely holding onto my As and Bs in my classes. Even when I am awake to go to class, I sometimes skip anyways because I don’t want to see anyone. I have gone days without any human contact before (including my significant other who doesn’t live with me). My eating habits have gotten really unhealthy and because I sleep a lot, I normally eat my first meal of the day at 4pm or 5pm and my second at 11pm. Thankfully, I haven’t had any negative thoughts about my weight, but I still don’t think my current eating schedule is healthy. Even though I only see my parents a few times a month, I still feel pressure from them to do well and even pretend I’m fine at times so that they don’t suspect anything and try to pull me out of school or something. I believe they have the power to do this because my mom helps me pay for my apartment and I would have no where to go if she stopped helping me. She once threatened to send me to a center for disordered eating the summer before I started college instead of letting me go to college because I had a relapse. I feel like I need help but I’m afraid to ask for it for fear of having to drop out of school. Any suggestions or comments on my situation would be helpful, thank you.",7.4904294615042275,6.129507967289723,7.9081041388518045,74.66609034267915,63.953271028037385,10.67574543836226,38.60525144637294,9.606745405546679,3.6340036493101913,1702,78,325,27,21,564,213,428,0.13,0.767,0.10300000000000001,-0.9211,5,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,3,4,23,16,0,4,16,0,35,11,3,2,3,58,62,30,0,10,9,3,3,1,1,3,1,0,2,2,11,22,7,2,6,1,1,7,10,7,3,4,12,7,59,9,59,45,7,59,0,1,2,0,25,23,0,9,27,240,70,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446202549778895,0.0,0.05422966684877311,0.0,0.0,0.04956703220150835,0.0,0.05833536577828146,0.0,0.0662713718031473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05918910934868572,0.17285239136675776,0.0,0.18096320545347472,0.07986729762388088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091434703118821,0.0,0.0,0.07195054544220726,0.0,0.0,0.2437337993056661,0.0,0.0,0.07254375932741558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3626842233956879,0.0,0.0,0.06278635354761752,0.0,0.0,0.1872852897100172,0.06412289396576965,0.0,0.06773719743814746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976950364500791,0.07168692048569382,0.05064290646809663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060297897988147435,0.0,0.0,0.05476843920610125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086305751202375,0.0,0.1133923496406918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19006082421570755,0.07489781103969738,0.07110715306525868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057783757621002574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248850579735408,0.0,0.034632641529072236,0.0,0.12519205410164916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738339770226821,0.12053408742938895,0.0,0.0,0.047318762403880485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302399691246423,0.0565826896354538,0.07534347691327596,0.0,0.052563078036892814,0.05467374101346363,0.0,0.07539094414368051,0.0,0.06945588179400246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754941594322638,0.048036022499233055,0.10782811213106204,0.0,0.0,0.15742704009294572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045413120933965774,0.0,0.0,0.07610794199465643,0.0,0.060538568476255265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35871578042058105,0.1129782430257814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05863987100079051,0.07968187682468061,0.2128197060261424,0.0,0.0,0.05457358998232766,0.14022148774894708,0.0,0.050175391699622866,0.15111585930763555,0.1698354390199721,0.05926613326516929,0.0,0.0,0.08115060957740003,0.0,0.0,0.06681176744453937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305295944743401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04542262110575192,0.06964779473759385,0.056277715038218434,0.08267155028481074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481287788179804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362399214141655,0.0,0.0,0.08632334763645656,0.1912123830404687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833418390971151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510719107381033,0.0,0.0,0.04565000315123508
mentalhealth,ineedadvice423,2020/03/03,Feeling like I'm destined to die the same way as my favourite singer. So my most favourite singer Chester Bennington from the band Linkin Park passed away from suicide from hanging in 2017. And since I absolutely love his music I have listened to it a lot. And I can relate with some of his lyrics. And for some reason my brain has come up with the idea that I am also going to commit suicide at 41 just like he did. Even tho I dont actually want die?? Can someone help me figure out why this is happening?,3.535965346534653,5.142187683168316,3.937710396039602,89.3176547029703,73.15841584158416,6.6341584158415845,26.48638613861386,7.1686216300943375,1.1128306930693066,400,14,83,4,8,125,77,101,0.159,0.7040000000000001,0.136,-0.6877,0,0,0,0,0,3,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,4,0,8,2,1,1,1,19,16,7,4,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,0,4,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,2,11,3,16,15,5,10,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,4,2,55,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.19247549664603172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577308791815697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18531126688162847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201824502313915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990277273050347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4094030862894632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311610593956477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13027360906669347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972928326627577,0.14090661812128574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209470307255716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17441660442793253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220424065930422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22265730145211898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19272070798474347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16768439859104428,0.1780146817568815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027931563169116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631570240739462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16711882262456176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43149195701859994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633587750212357,0.1565580676367412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17797630273050605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Woofer_Blaster,2020/03/03,"Is there a way to get a free therapist online? I know it sounds dumb, but I just want someone that i can talk to online who I can talk to about my problems with and get advice from on some stuff",2.5035714285714303,3.225283166666668,3.6366666666666654,93.925,74.47619047619048,6.552380952380951,21.142857142857142,6.42735559955562,0.05008571428571473,151,3,36,1,3,49,32,42,0.138,0.775,0.087,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,7,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,2,7,7,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059255697944866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3271293013333941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17205350367032154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2995629565636804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26526075781161723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583869557696805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5032629902162676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3634950600453966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18465510073763125,0.2484981105697477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Artemis-531,2020/03/03,"Are there psychiatrists here? Or even just people knowledgeable about mental health? Please i need help I grew up in a very toxic environment. Even now that im 20 yrs old i still get abused emotionally by my own father. 

I just want to ask a person with enough knowledge about mental health. I think something's wrong with me but i cant afford to go to a hospital. If there's someone here i could talk to it would be a big help.",0.7194961240310072,3.2482905232558146,2.160813953488372,92.33525193798452,91.44186046511628,5.192248062015505,16.468992248062015,6.816661863887847,-0.04487286821705405,339,8,71,5,12,109,63,86,0.054000000000000006,0.836,0.11,0.5204,1,0,1,0,1,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,12,1,0,0,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,14,11,3,0,5,5,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,9,0,11,8,2,8,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,2,3,46,11,0,0.0,0.22014219597644352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17369758604674973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483458970922168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20899959156971,0.0,0.19198069964415607,0.0,0.24543782510890505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707264540090296,0.0,0.1055942194488219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3949926664121104,0.0,0.0,0.2490751697911602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006954989163695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3744846812511314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377680817791916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949654715306356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288100788038394,0.16223308252849558,0.0,0.20395221454373305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15742743543220078,0.14303764331290358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14837983571843585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14933871589470735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905290962470405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330416482612974,0.10958944394347518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198673625681806,0.20314274341483693,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iridescent_kitty,2020/03/03,"Getting a Psychiatrist appointment Why the hell is it so hard to get a pyschiatrist appointment? I chose this place because I was told by my doctor that I'd get an appointment in a couple of weeks as they have a large team, but it took a week and a half to hear back and my appointment is in 6 more weeks. I'm really struggling, and I hate how hard it is to get help, and then I dont even know if they'll be good and I know itll take multiple appointments to get diagnosed, and if each appointment is a 6 week gap that means 4 and a half months probably before I'm diagnosed. This has just got me so down, I just want to be better",5.540309168443493,4.3739369328358215,6.6697441364605545,81.33932835820895,67.73134328358209,11.537739872068233,30.33688699360341,10.914260884657429,2.872849893390192,495,15,114,13,7,168,79,134,0.12300000000000001,0.777,0.1,-0.4628,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,2,7,5,2,1,10,0,12,3,0,1,0,18,29,15,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,8,8,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,3,0,2,4,3,11,2,11,21,2,12,1,0,0,0,6,4,1,2,7,72,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374289760163254,0.0,0.09017188638871428,0.0,0.12587073840797286,0.0,0.0,0.13082500007208914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636728942737914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30027545967609753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15140444867801764,0.0,0.0,0.17336349800560813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770109474607427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38641573365301096,0.0,0.0,0.12406996670353936,0.1183067470261938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650181382726424,0.14604236381523705,0.0,0.0,0.16671885971403547,0.0,0.09914900750062816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16258814010813644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113043738562466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180699398147233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15454702037745038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15948494911184613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476262952534503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546402056881984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121894493358747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413458228349904,0.16434679961234805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724823601366401,0.0,0.4746164664329381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334766092703178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Marilyn_Blu,2020/03/03,"Antidepressants I take two different medications for my mental health. I feel like I wake up and I feel happy and fine, but as the day goes on the happiness gets used up or something. by the night I have no happiness left and the night has been really hard for me with just really bad thoughts. Just feeling so bad. Do you think I need more medicine?",3.4229901960784335,5.540299632352943,4.100588235294119,85.84931372549022,74.73529411764707,8.650980392156864,24.568627450980397,9.2995712137729,1.9874333333333336,277,9,57,7,6,88,50,68,0.18100000000000002,0.617,0.20199999999999999,-0.0435,1,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,0,4,0,4,3,1,1,0,15,13,7,0,1,4,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,4,9,5,8,11,1,7,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,4,36,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925890389780067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11299710457363568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830590204133586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657770247306611,0.12517133217246573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154092457048824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5595486004256223,0.1569553416994913,0.0,0.0,0.18624193114649928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903681139619419,0.0,0.0,0.08559962646646968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765074372954585,0.17657226614993576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991731635916173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32884877674056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22449030839076287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348865899674463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13173745479676954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226863525603284,0.0,0.13909858367615455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17115645188675652,0.0,0.0,0.1513267240032064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DbyZ-NOFG,2020/03/03,"Getting over religious anxiety I have anxiety attacks over going to hell that keep me up at night. If every religion says that they are the way to escape damnation, how can I make the right choice? So in my mind I am already eternally doomed. What if I am in hell already? 
Also getting weird anxiety during the day that a cult will come after me like midsommar. From pagan to Christian's, all religion is giving me anxiety and I cant escape. 
Am I truly alone?",3.3958707865168565,5.587595146067418,5.189199438202248,77.67346207865171,75.06741573033706,8.49494382022472,29.10252808988764,9.188382445141503,2.9588078651685388,364,16,63,9,8,124,63,89,0.316,0.606,0.079,-0.9751,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,3,6,3,0,4,0,9,0,0,2,1,9,16,6,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,0,1,11,1,11,15,1,14,5,1,0,0,3,7,2,2,5,46,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20002465915822848,0.4262479925552809,0.15444616427411234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5909763476824952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21971350233126594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16636458050522715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455301230984922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16272053694972455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20180513382009668,0.1852681017809519,0.10976035266419112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17166301012824914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435366834597868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289159191235826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950064633217809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18123962508594374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16493214955474772,0.0,0.15358489975564946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329777630179495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nearby-Plant,2020/03/03,PLEASE HELP Can anyone know how to treat schizophrenia / affective naturally. My friend cannot take any more anti psychotics Bc it is slowing his brain but he needs to focus at work. He is getting fat too. Please help what herbs / natural remedies how do we treat this naturally how do we do this,2.708753246753244,5.663448290909095,3.136103896103897,86.57272727272729,84.27272727272728,6.051948051948052,24.22077922077921,7.447530270364453,1.4118051948051942,236,9,43,4,7,73,41,55,0.026000000000000002,0.659,0.315,0.9564,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,2,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,0,7,2,2,4,0,9,11,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,3,11,1,2,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,1,24,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993948164029914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20502126663319656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273225508267812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22653554749675744,0.0,0.15319163042377315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3930688321184974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16114213333960742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174136388366497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6437193947987949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22045959862089265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134624723266188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kuburga,2020/03/03,Is It Normal to Keep Seeing a Psychotherapist Twice a Week after 2.5 Years  I have been seeing a therapist twice a week for 2.5 years with a small  amount of missed days. I began seeing this psychiatrist for reasons of  already diagnosed chronic depression and an addiction. Through this  period I feel like I definitely changed for the better but my depression  and addiction problems are still solid. Is it normal that I can only  observe minor changes relative to my main problems after such a long  time? Or should I start looking for other options?,9.877731958762883,9.648652649484537,9.371876288659797,62.42441237113404,58.58762886597938,12.296082474226804,41.049484536082474,11.602472056035307,5.179710927835052,445,21,65,11,5,143,66,97,0.165,0.7609999999999999,0.075,-0.9003,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,2,7,0,0,8,0,7,4,0,1,0,14,16,4,0,5,2,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,2,2,5,8,2,12,13,2,14,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,2,14,50,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34117643379256524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726815142577607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839540111184653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33107390846560736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091779033183768,0.0,0.26955502264137665,0.15882569334232144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912188003398476,0.11179060121408622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908817894149691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764490841497397,0.0,0.0,0.1384814341538371,0.13140526817112555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066378028084715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901143046070095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994638236101881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16088931214895905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37408711089438573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075859573317903,0.0,0.1249665363464182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18168738517151992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09124577314161116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510404594308394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015382470560364
mentalhealth,gladlywarm,2020/03/03,"I’m lost in a brain knot Hey redditors!
Currently at a rehab. My old councilor left. He was amazing but my new one sucks. So here I come to reddit for advice
Before I came here I was depressed and fatigued, socially anxious as hell. Always stuck in my brain. I’m quiet as heck but eventually warmed up to everyone which I never thought I’d ever do. 
Everyone loved me. I loved the person I always wanted to. My dad visited and he said he could tell I wasn’t stuck in my head. 
Now I’m back in the knot. Social anxiety enraging. I don’t know how to get out of this cloudiness. 
Any tips?",0.17875000000000085,2.5486603750000008,2.773333333333333,88.53750000000002,91.08333333333334,6.0,20.833333333333336,7.413659706084162,1.0253333333333332,455,16,93,9,16,157,79,120,0.243,0.645,0.113,-0.9527,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,7,10,3,0,4,0,6,7,3,1,2,14,22,8,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,6,0,1,9,3,14,4,15,12,0,18,1,3,0,2,13,8,3,0,7,54,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581866796601026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693932633404339,0.0,0.0,0.11008354551814226,0.0,0.12383730065805736,0.18287764890918468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447526913654992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13774744946821024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614219022647955,0.0,0.18514691253448287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944477240531458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12924753151456664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13942649310235844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642918831214244,0.0,0.3093654146271724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457530704645169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16613497028585894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896468669741754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758824456463458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17671049158242458,0.0,0.2922049638562045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248513755923661,0.15634413671547215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16986520301430208,0.0,0.10969367334015463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14134685122954546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398438281844154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3300313319990137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414897338556192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851416434054685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548066638434376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NaiveLoquat,2020/03/03,"Can you help me ? So I know i have some mental problems but, i don't know what is it. I sometimes get panic attack. I stress and there is some voice tells me that I am not good enough and some Bad thoughts.

Can you help me?",-1.3201785714285703,0.7088566250000028,0.11345238095238308,106.46250000000002,97.33333333333334,2.742857142857144,13.107142857142858,3.1291,-1.847235714285714,170,3,43,0,7,53,33,48,0.368,0.5429999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.9582,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,2,6,1,2,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,11,11,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,1,11,1,0,10,4,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,3,0,31,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3036900589494888,0.0,0.0,0.22288908726787046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275826982583393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13946847220552774,0.0,0.0,0.22390196873132026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578570796297924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934135119868376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26901917704399714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132040746288972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554316455970887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640168078521668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057861905382512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333229130669511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21192561733771628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sparkledust247,2020/03/03,"I think I just had my first panic attack today Okay so this might be very long so I’ll just give a brief list of my symptoms and then maybe the story that triggered it later on for those interested. 

Basically I was crying a lot, I felt like I couldn’t breathe, I had my hands on my chest and around my neck cause I felt like there was something restricting my breathing, and my chest kept involuntarily kind of taking short sharp breathes and every time I tried to say words they would get cut out halfway.


So all of this was triggered by a teacher (bear in mind I’m an 18 year old straight A student, not some 12 year old troublemaker)  who admitted afterwards to me that she felt like she was having a breakdown and that she has a lot of things in her personal life at the moment like her child has the flu etc. But basically I asked the teacher a question in class, something I already had some tension towards doing and she completely flipped on me. Called me out in front of the whole class, made me cry, then when that wasn’t enough she took me outside the door and proceeded to shout at me for a solid ten minutes. After this point I could not breathe she was still in my personal space giving out to me for crying basically diminishing my problems and she had to go back into the class to get a friend to help me as I genuinely felt the walls were closing in on me. This whole situation was about an hour in total including the teacher then bursting into tears and trying to act extremely nice clearly realising what she had just done was crazy.

It’s been like 12 hours and my throat still has a lump in it and I feel extremely on edge etc, and I just don’t know what to do. I have an appointment with my parents in the school tomorrow but I’m very anxious",5.7403052503052505,5.9149174301994325,6.023158323158327,81.6494871794872,67.00569800569801,9.192836792836793,31.244200244200243,8.976282227363876,2.3525345543345546,1402,51,286,22,21,449,181,351,0.073,0.851,0.075,-0.3408,1,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,1,14,15,2,2,23,1,29,13,9,4,3,57,49,22,0,4,8,1,7,5,1,2,4,2,1,3,16,20,0,2,9,0,0,5,5,5,0,2,23,9,46,10,45,21,11,57,0,0,0,0,25,29,0,6,28,203,62,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064216984363144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894745659336504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858502397074548,0.09015648417006224,0.1097121135858579,0.0,0.07415484648939302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847395020641574,0.0,0.0,0.09906836067898464,0.0,0.0,0.10111337717220613,0.0,0.0,0.0769978721482548,0.0,0.3177977463718767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868952628393217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964620293437697,0.21510765848050648,0.0,0.0,0.08125314941119807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04876193547922021,0.0,0.37038230037136416,0.0,0.0,0.08203008837065101,0.0,0.0,0.07450773671881929,0.0,0.1007697184240326,0.18502417749257827,0.05480792100142102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464033874480116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18994394982026727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042530591374374,0.05299978646992784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06811699051456886,0.2355736053765343,0.0,0.0,0.08534456909237838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16397622758677405,0.0,0.09125193938037307,0.0,0.0,0.09688490342729317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023054466454834,0.0973748587452704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023908546780795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314917956189792,0.1070829534828293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16841183196298545,0.0,0.0,0.09116505355006957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227811345590166,0.0,0.0,0.10803259773249166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669134481165922,0.0,0.09760037463870257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840031934036408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14848532231866451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15403097549674802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002359767017958,0.07250935189947245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406910236926358,0.061793557448119325,0.0,0.0,0.056233756083294735,0.0,0.09141191975864267,0.0,0.10714613354550047,0.1309501031159161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591428507893211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21533909994240893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850676724311715,0.0,0.0,0.1242057822099334
mentalhealth,ObamaHeroX,2020/03/03,"Could I be developing schizophrenia? Recently I've been feeling very sad and angry about stuff in my personal life such as being verbally harassed and hurt by some people, as well as the death of my friend, I had a bit of a breakdown yesterday where I just felt very angry inside and wanting to cry. Today I've been feeling very emotionally flat and apathetic, however I was still able to laugh really hard at some funny jokes with my friends, as well as crying from an emotional story. I also sometimes have been having trouble concentrating on things and lose my train of thought while explaining things. Other than that, I have not had any other symptoms. I am very afraid of getting this disease.

Please leave any suggestions you may have.

Thank you for your time.",8.111285714285717,8.463836557142855,7.586428571428572,71.84107142857147,62.0,10.714285714285717,35.35714285714286,10.411451182825502,3.758071428571428,618,25,103,13,8,194,99,140,0.223,0.61,0.16699999999999998,-0.912,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,1,8,13,1,1,4,0,15,2,0,0,0,18,23,12,1,2,2,0,4,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,6,2,0,8,4,14,7,20,11,3,10,0,3,0,0,8,4,0,3,6,76,21,0,0.13944430265261684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151355845145876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896538151053355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522370627389098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11133492898193813,0.0,0.30634603732777593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31371214358834565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14101445850731553,0.0,0.1338883983333147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21546864464572624,0.0,0.07285389278464535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491470552438105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492780100452922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765138234128533,0.0,0.0,0.0984936348215016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600250619704528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667312178420698,0.12175738645877672,0.0,0.15306796997439093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893315909547044,0.0,0.13768442618344048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791398090502435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136040022592872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596303647801322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14493602272595504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838157894962066,0.0,0.0,0.18528119708253935,0.0,0.0,0.11070320022642237,0.08131109425811782,0.0,0.13217689412033687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4602246139087321,0.08224786258181624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25075434934443963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Freshek,2020/03/03,"My hands shake when I talk for more than 5-10 minutes. I first noticed my hands shake when I was in the middle of a pretty stressful conversation. I am pretty awkward socially and have very little social skills meaning as soon as the discussion starts getting serious I freak out. I don't really feel anxious, though, I'm just trying to escape the interaction.

Anyway since that 'accident', it started happening more and more often. I've seen a neurologist and they told me to see a therapist because it's likely caused by anxiety. My therapist says I am completely okay.

Well, my hands still shake and I don't even know what to do. Anyone else had a problem like this?",4.831428571428571,6.7703676984126995,5.806539682539682,75.87457142857146,70.42857142857143,9.166984126984126,30.06031746031745,9.642632912329526,3.1051326984126986,534,22,92,13,10,176,89,126,0.146,0.72,0.134,0.1324,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,2,10,12,0,5,7,1,8,3,3,1,0,12,19,9,0,1,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,8,1,1,4,7,14,4,11,15,3,14,0,0,2,0,9,4,0,1,9,63,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12213207539979686,0.18035944490736847,0.0,0.1116312318690878,0.16358064299076408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973213672615327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16400487995451565,0.0,0.0,0.16739034714279968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333673756777381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544754584203253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072401036828494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579850018393191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341071488371575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14117827104652028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773965328629242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15599418666236853,0.1600115853189714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17390602661031196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817629736415043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248435882961335,0.0,0.15276381698495908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227609779558662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696036063565,0.0,0.0,0.1272206533578721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206441349666773,0.0,0.0,0.3254868388588085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22600266895835894,0.0,0.12749697013498626,0.0,0.18287892848483314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283208982422333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3707327065047676,0.0,0.0,0.15685565139174054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525527443854086,0.0,0.1083921031617164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172825289748955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354483157713208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LJJ55,2020/03/03,Getting out of a funk I don't know why but I just feel really down today. Last couple of days have been good but all I want to do today is sleep and eat. I have heaps of uni work to do but I am struggling to make myself do it. Don't know how to get out of this funk.,-1.579976958525343,0.11046685483871244,1.1868663594470057,102.32887096774193,90.12903225806451,4.188018433179724,12.082949308755765,5.288315135182226,-1.5644082949308755,203,2,55,1,7,70,40,62,0.062,0.85,0.08800000000000001,0.1531,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,1,0,10,2,1,2,1,14,17,5,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,6,1,11,16,1,7,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,37,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287158430670078,0.0,0.1673715456083388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655578985524203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122316005117438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711812145911168,0.0,0.0,0.2176764643281693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852552670139674,0.2115467430679297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732343219733386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16625775514880392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25971148020403145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713108910363528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4919969176443078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530740116961944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23418009328478756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18893660298223414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eevuie,2020/03/03,"what do I do hey. 

i have been feeling like a waste a space. sometimes i can't cope well and I honestly feel like im failing the 2 subjects im taking in school. i cant do the presentations needed for some of the units or even practise presentations. It's given me so much anxiety that I don't turn up to lesson anymore that i know will be involving presentations for that lesson in fear of getting upset. my teachers hate my guts over it. 

i have this one support teacher but she is also busy with other students. ive emailed her quite a few times just to ask when i can speak to her (over another issue) but she hadn't had time to get back to me and i honestly feel ignored and alone. she sees everyone else within a day or two but with me i never see her and can't have the chance to talk to her. it makes me feel like shit and that she hates me. i havent got anyone else to talk to either. 

if i dare say that i feel like shit she says she might have to call my parents cus shes worried about me and its my worst fear as my parents don't support my mental health. they think i shouldnt have mental health issues as my sisters are fine. 

i don't want to exist anymore but i don't want to die. i just want to be normal like everyone else in my class. everyone else can do presentations without missing lessons or being sick. everyone else can talk in group activities. 

my friend hates how i get upset over the things I cant change. tho most of my mental health i could change, theres something i cant unfortunately and it was about that. i think that the thing has rocked me over and that's why im like this. i was having an alright day up until that moment and then i felt sick after it happened. 

i feel like i should email her because there's no way im going to her session tomorrow (just goes over news for the week at school) but im too much of a waste of space to even be cared about so why should I?",1.6928109452736315,3.4454518880597043,3.206791044776121,91.96053482587065,78.6268656716418,6.058706467661692,21.86318407960199,6.937597516519254,0.4245542288557216,1497,43,335,16,36,492,181,402,0.172,0.7020000000000001,0.126,-0.9618,2,2,1,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,1,5,19,29,5,4,13,1,43,8,3,2,1,55,77,28,1,10,14,3,7,7,1,5,5,3,0,0,21,11,0,1,13,1,0,1,15,13,1,2,8,12,60,16,46,59,7,34,0,2,2,0,31,15,2,7,24,227,81,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031174538447119,0.0,0.05429020313670097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118674172552918,0.051934319825070116,0.0,0.13465378922942242,0.047469037755870414,0.06955952727785293,0.0,0.0,0.06346634265832027,0.0,0.0,0.0522018681229116,0.0,0.041384042616391635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932148612771749,0.0,0.06921658791734205,0.0,0.14363351817248726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05420323765625943,0.0,0.0,0.08756460053729093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045727772131878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.283559577613198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967908802994058,0.0,0.0,0.2594805006356965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527862941197716,0.20595801184767684,0.2424968706445913,0.06518335926233823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05245028788359452,0.0,0.10640641443523287,0.0,0.038582452795130256,0.0,0.05429642937304063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060033348789654786,0.0,0.0,0.20107675407414247,0.0,0.21648608208597225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666547588283884,0.14171537485882452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0373096027410884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321673634104161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04531592914377697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052461433820331,0.07201869718396617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981133936909314,0.05033827173179232,0.05235959792532845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651606377890917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04600283019544078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507637189087056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220750260963983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797491081313533,0.0,0.13741305192682413,0.10819627977685382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937261104316548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226368592763298,0.06714320789954957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407754654209327,0.0,0.0,0.051043509692592616,0.1636979936942145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020386369789103,0.08700008939304299,0.0,0.0,0.0791723604885628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384291342648558,0.06631694854215181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120126733353325,0.05388652709469709,0.054455853315053336,0.0,0.061039683211467015,0.0,0.1225171593399344,0.0,0.0,0.0654418433373136,0.0,0.0,0.06894380580618209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jbell014,2020/03/03,"Starving but no appetite recently...feel constantly nauseous I’ve only had this problem one other time and it was freshman year of college at 18. I was stressed to the point of having no appetite.

Now I’m 23 years old and it’s happening again. I had a period of time where I was having issues in my relationship with fighting and violence. After that ceased, this started. I’m constantly sleeping too. The sleeping has improved a bit but the eating issue remains.

I want to eat really badly and I’m genuinely very hungry but I have a pit in my stomach...anyone else? Any remedies? I’m nervous to go to a therapist",1.7361440677966122,4.504033355932204,3.88625,80.33581567796612,88.32203389830508,6.339830508474578,28.561440677966104,7.645422480735847,2.501150847457627,488,25,81,10,16,166,78,118,0.247,0.7090000000000001,0.044000000000000004,-0.9792,0,0,0,0,2,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,2,7,0,9,4,2,0,0,10,17,7,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,5,0,7,0,12,12,1,18,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,12,55,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351070310522808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671370673961735,0.1710283302856657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937046548636067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18223241141308547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607604680556094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415997949314549,0.13943947865538406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439930577867971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948639638322787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147605997434958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484403199161605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17515350306452526,0.0,0.11310869329680262,0.12694948737689787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15779249029565134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971902340839755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693264138288204,0.0,0.0,0.17920863178590365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33407926807166394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814618895413732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19120525027498905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193805925372772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19466372399349155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772572801158126,0.09845320227677816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21498083882834226
mentalhealth,unknownb124580,2020/03/03,"bipolar and depression hi, my boyfriend has bipolar disorder and depression what can i do to help him? i am trying to be patient but i need more advice",3.0554022988505736,5.67161431034483,4.455862068965517,80.33367816091955,78.3103448275862,8.004597701149425,33.804597701149426,8.841846274778883,3.505749425287357,121,7,21,3,3,40,23,29,0.215,0.7240000000000001,0.061,-0.5719,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,4,6,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,2,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,17,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3776397264541798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6657069081767978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44291134849709823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590328963083579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865517688658602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26237783666257464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,singininpain,2020/03/03,"Is it okay to give up some times? I am tired. All of my life people have told me to never give up. To be subborn and never give up. So I did and I achieved many things I wanted to achieve. However I wonder, isn't it okay to give up for once? Even if a great opportunity slips through my fingers. Can I not just give up for once? It might be a life changing opportunity indeed. While I really want to take this opportunity, I am tired. Tired of being stubborn and doing my best. I just want to rest for a while.",0.06503628447024568,2.314921962264151,2.5069811320754742,91.6116763425254,88.81132075471697,5.148330914368652,18.531204644412192,6.67199483983844,0.0014362844702464628,392,11,89,5,13,134,59,106,0.099,0.6920000000000001,0.21,0.8963,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,6,4,8,1,0,3,2,12,6,1,0,3,17,23,7,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,1,13,7,18,17,4,10,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,4,5,68,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864921582294307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976284782583034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872623945508052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.633695954537906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14566006329803546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18663706293675336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394645719793324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015584026911707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20379439590893708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814017539491672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159367276591078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463788443521719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993359540089386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777302843874196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703880481216491,0.4555490591120662,0.0,0.12624397907097906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337790589145482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327584525736956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,potatofishchips7155,2020/03/03,"Am I disabled? Hello, I been wondering if I'm disabled. I have schizophrenia, OCD, BPD and high functioning depression. 

The thing is, I assist to school normally as any other student, but I have to take breaks in the middle of the classes, and I have to wear earplugs on breaks because loud sounds hurts my ears and my brain.

Also, my parents are doing paperwork to give me a  disability certificate so they don't have to pay for my psychologist, but they say it's only a formality.

Anyway, thank you for reading!! And hope you are doing well 

Sorry for my bad English.",5.889212283044058,6.827069242990657,6.582643524699602,75.09383177570095,66.85046728971963,9.478771695594123,33.04272363150868,9.606745405546679,3.1971265687583443,447,19,79,9,7,147,75,107,0.11800000000000001,0.782,0.1,-0.4749,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,2,0,4,6,0,0,5,0,12,3,3,0,0,10,18,10,0,3,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,3,1,0,1,4,16,3,12,17,0,6,0,2,0,0,8,4,0,3,0,59,19,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17690696811546688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15043498695461702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18470675966004046,0.1348516874986222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786147731401422,0.2469510720081089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19053367669307653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122112797596333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337276592772331,0.0,0.21971816352441412,0.0,0.0,0.23681712367665364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21674546224247004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824531920778268,0.0,0.0,0.2456350397768314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22127663073465406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759204515812247,0.0,0.2238831777315106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476340586297149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663274775184002,0.0,0.0,0.20366667703228275,0.0,0.0,0.14696658989204536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19890044000165766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399001466159025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EconomyMongoose00,2020/03/03,Major Depression and Adjustment disorder diagnosis? I was diagnosed with major depression a few years ago. I also just got diagnosed with adjustment disorder due to a loved one dying. I’m just confused about this diagnosis because I thought major depressive disorder rules out adjustment disorder. Was I wrongly diagnosed?,8.420588235294119,12.196522823529413,9.442901960784315,45.52905882352943,65.86274509803921,15.844705882352939,47.45490196078431,13.023866798666859,9.558283137254902,268,19,28,15,5,91,32,51,0.376,0.561,0.063,-0.9556,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,11,6,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,4,0,4,1,5,2,4,4,0,3,0,1,1,1,0,1,3,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364769472976115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056998078529785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190743328980464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3895715694394048,0.4590823351489807,0.15647450424257178,0.0,0.6911777221564226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058380827446652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607498335326607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021650322207776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969381041661235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16484232356125866,0.0,0.09709034595649536
mentalhealth,theloopdeloops,2020/03/03,"Job advice ? Hello all! 

It’s my first time posting here so please let me know if I violate any rules!

I recently started as a temp for a tv show I really enjoy, and I’ve been wanting this kind of job for the longest time! The only problem is it’s 60 hours per week, 12 hours per day Monday through Friday. It often goes past 12 hours as well, depending on the needs of the office. 

I’m only on my 3rd day and I feel so so drained mentally and physically. The work itself isn’t hard but the commute is over an hour every morning (LA traffic). Plus the 12 hours, I feel like it might be too much. 

I heard from another assistant they might offer me a full time position, which would have been my dream job had it not been for the hours. 

Additionally, I meet with my therapist once a week in the middle of the day (that’s the only time he’s available), and if I take the job I wouldn’t be able to meet with him and I have to stay in therapy in my current situation. 

I don’t know what to do. This could jump start my career but it would mean 60 hours per week for 9 months. 

Any advice and help would be appreciated, if you need more information about my situation please ask! 

TLDR: job that could jumpstart my career requires 60 hour weeks and I don’t know if I can do that in my current mental health situation.",2.3222063595068114,4.0385265223880635,4.056586632057107,86.73267034393251,76.68656716417911,7.1981829980532135,23.21933809214796,8.04050195162591,1.1288031797534068,1020,31,219,17,23,343,141,268,0.028999999999999998,0.8759999999999999,0.095,0.9598,7,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,1,3,8,6,1,0,17,0,26,1,0,1,1,41,41,19,0,14,7,0,3,1,0,6,1,1,0,0,14,11,0,1,7,3,0,1,5,2,1,1,5,4,27,4,25,24,4,40,0,0,0,0,12,9,0,8,29,135,41,9,0.07450027434156951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560161170561756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013254825510624,0.07812003344571906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964769971157983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896481383849344,0.0,0.0,0.1441395410891735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627696943032572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753391543797557,0.053223010875475936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336989529645624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667376124648583,0.0,0.0,0.0791903078352011,0.0,0.0,0.04993596349276985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5869421063119183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696501335154685,0.0,0.0,0.07758057131565202,0.12283020728289913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761815780622707,0.0,0.036397070889078224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115263926178598,0.0,0.0,0.15015750776954187,0.15806603579135028,0.0,0.0,0.05946540820536405,0.0,0.05476627375248512,0.1104820188694506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793403607478476,0.0,0.16998244724309694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111894174078247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355785842908008,0.0,0.0,0.07135066904128745,0.0,0.0,0.07128670106306008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04772678343176077,0.0,0.07356003313223496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25122428939717023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054633552595411,0.07940737987119582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056014934631320616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519755647287444,0.08650056061870544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376683633562034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04394219204220769,0.0,0.2390385051581325,0.0,0.06698469375633519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054237087014647606,0.0,0.0,0.15876857212486914,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigsquidtheory,2020/03/03,"really really struggling i have no control of my mood at all anymore it changes so frequently 

all my friendships have spiralled into really deep ones and literally my friends are 5 people i have super intense conversation with and then  everyone else is sort of just there for me and i feel so bad about it

i get too fucking angry sometimes and that’s probably cuz i have like no impulse control anymore i just do things",4.602983725135624,7.0320831139240525,5.540542495479205,75.4407594936709,72.29113924050633,8.564918625678121,34.070524412296564,9.23628265651192,3.6086802893309233,342,18,56,8,7,112,56,79,0.18,0.672,0.14800000000000002,-0.6102,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,3,7,7,1,1,0,0,7,1,0,3,2,15,10,8,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,1,10,3,7,10,2,5,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,1,3,45,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.414299276471181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17440338595597768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22096393646406615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4685461383549212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744897466516332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19959071387249747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561437567686223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137768157310975,0.19310321669979705,0.1091294961314936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204664360951267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415403114510591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448088587517799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22520449636713494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4014354403131996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065844757279156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183633617721368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138768450850158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zenith1357,2020/03/03,"How is it fair How is it fair that so many people just do not face consequences for their actions? Especially when I suffer mine. I accept my faults, my shortcomings, and am going through immense pain everyday because of my past actions. But why do people who lie, throw others under the bus and then act like the victim suffer no consequences? Literally looking at these people everyday makes me sick. My heart sinks and I cannot breath anymore. When you give everything to someone, consider them one of your closest friends and they get away with everything because they put on a good show. It hurts.",5.496472986748216,7.810962174311925,5.371865443425076,78.12020387359837,69.45871559633028,8.514169215086646,31.37716615698267,9.150863307647796,3.0240144750254845,483,21,80,10,9,150,82,109,0.191,0.6890000000000001,0.12,-0.8838,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,4,0,6,10,1,0,3,0,6,5,3,3,0,12,11,11,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,1,1,0,6,3,6,0,1,0,1,15,4,10,11,0,17,0,3,1,0,9,5,0,0,7,56,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20354694499310252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928335394097413,0.0,0.0,0.2502297334293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689202324371704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158571042431261,0.0,0.10723154399593683,0.1968887929766774,0.11664492238549448,0.17214896980737016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432151852086444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197179984481398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027187462375924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723533083685925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700199585210393,0.20808525044502024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907867874946378,0.0,0.21839413795846974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19592866775842852,0.4268711409479785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20632695712576687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17390261591200554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852008297396488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heathrowawayport,2020/03/03,"Would claiming suicide ideation get me treatment? I have crippling symptoms of social anxiety and major depression. 

A few times throughout my life I have worked up the strength to force myself to go a doctor or a specialist for help. 

The first couple visits are absolute torture to me and it’s always a situation where it’s going to be countless visits before any actual treatment will be discussed or the topic of medication can be broached. I seldom go back for even the second appointment. Is is absolute torture. 

I want to believe medication would help me balance out to something closer to neurotypical, and then maybe talk therapy or CBT might be an option, but from where I am now, it is nothing but psychological cruelty. 

My question here is, if I tell them up front that I am in a suicidal crisis, will they be forced to initiate pharmaceutical treatment without the months and months of psychological torture before they administer it?",7.821268372346214,9.29060610778443,8.136897114861188,63.76557430593361,62.772455089820355,10.623625476320086,39.13391399020141,10.637119530657019,4.77842994011976,768,40,112,19,11,252,104,167,0.18,0.759,0.061,-0.9771,0,0,1,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,3,3,6,5,3,0,11,0,20,5,0,0,0,18,25,11,2,4,7,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,0,6,1,4,0,2,0,0,16,1,19,15,2,20,0,1,0,0,12,7,0,7,7,91,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.14768465967215874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592585311613722,0.0,0.0,0.10291544941792574,0.0,0.11577362803804647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637005516409425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575560334919908,0.1705067971982264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16745330158737484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303477293618758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549014876204218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995772944885728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872855060354824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906818129245448,0.0,0.2580276715134316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20287817025241126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068949410464533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520399824172616,0.0,0.0,0.30491547069305325,0.0,0.16054635716122906,0.0,0.0,0.24159408102266305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14521348496902955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695338868977188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17011094673694674,0.0,0.1542706618632551,0.0,0.11650786136920192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3310797682510072,0.0,0.0,0.15729876994463612,0.0,0.1216402480181635,0.13227662208039942,0.0,0.17306889822698496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824676480765503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926343755932473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14588502659085367,0.0,0.11017631586247158,0.0,0.0,0.21501322329176764,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawei1924,2020/03/03,"I'm afraid that I might be getting evil thoughts So over the weekend my roommate went out with his friends and got hit by a car that got him sent to the ER with two skull fractures and a concussion. Naturally, after I found out, a couple of our mutual friends and I went to visit him at the hospital. If I'm going to be completely honest I was almost HOPING deep down in my mind that he was going to be in a much worse condition than he happened to be, and felt kind of let down when I saw him in a much better state than I expected. I was obviously aware of the fact that this thought was very wrong and malicious, but I just couldn't help to think it. In the past I have had apathetic reactions to the deaths and injuries of people who I've known personally. The only people I would really care about losing is my immediate family, and very close friends, no one else. Could this be indicative of underlying personally traits or conditions? I feel like these feelings that I get are almost sociopathic in nature.",6.692137962539972,6.378592110552766,7.4162083142987685,74.11393330287807,65.08040201005025,11.2564641388762,32.66377341251713,10.832165505486646,3.40477487437186,806,29,157,20,11,269,122,199,0.096,0.794,0.11,0.4555,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,2,4,13,1,1,12,0,18,1,1,0,2,35,41,12,1,6,4,0,3,1,3,2,0,0,0,2,10,12,0,0,8,1,0,7,2,4,1,2,15,4,20,9,31,15,2,26,0,1,1,0,16,14,0,6,5,109,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710007220418531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196768300401908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379646306900822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187722880821896,0.0,0.0,0.10803955945333388,0.1497256116139657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303993329101635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756476069767933,0.0,0.13684061339054165,0.09667044333920237,0.1299254753572484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836803163888587,0.3136365782472605,0.0,0.1413950240573726,0.0,0.1538074617996016,0.0,0.21645062409569696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966031617658608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070008723690264,0.0,0.0,0.13440024601251538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14091176166526154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13837073108829276,0.0,0.06610901790820764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138503430382624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354988101453794,0.13663152691302108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989470297377841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169425522956737,0.10291462448650768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12917532313197733,0.18762344547304893,0.23630705140755304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866874916997291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670562623983383,0.0,0.2148530580996232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321849803552481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22330128105774685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508803035023551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13789951427218147,0.0961252661406984,0.1479478228577994,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mentalstability1,2020/03/03,"Podcast!!! Do any of you have a recommendation for any podcast?  I created a podcast but I don't think it sounds good. 😞
https://open.spotify.com/show/6VXrhWqLyWjvKSUPdVLy12",8.1996,12.14968176,6.184000000000001,59.63200000000002,91.4,6.8000000000000025,29.0,7.554174236665415,2.9106,144,6,19,3,5,42,19,25,0.0,0.732,0.268,0.7372,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7900081618513809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4871970228544112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37219103311337376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rotzle-Fotzle,2020/03/03,Friends don’t feel like friends I’m feeling angry and stressed because my “friends” are always messing with me and taking my things and making me do stupid stuff to get them back I know it sounds stupid and silly and that’s what friends sometimes do but it’s constant and repetitive and I feel like no one can help,4.141774193548386,5.996383177419357,3.329870967741936,93.27480645161293,72.06451612903227,5.605161290322582,30.14193548387097,5.6839178017228535,1.1216670967741942,255,11,51,1,5,74,42,62,0.184,0.557,0.259,0.5423,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,1,0,1,11,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,14,13,8,0,0,1,0,3,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,0,4,7,7,2,13,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,5,31,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16911923089306033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15628573276516966,0.0,0.12389854343639975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196396789904893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30830600472652525,0.2904018762908339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6281178793318986,0.0,0.10618907616977158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362333439442162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170019030428438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19859413257187866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356701100331172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377266041406399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20101819770276733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328207412416443,0.0,0.23267117674484056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15281775541882528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350294294361364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eck_elias,2020/03/03,"I feel like I am changing, and it's not feeling good, has anybody ever felt the same? It's been a weird couple of days
I've been feeling kind of disconnected from reality, only slightly but definitely noticeable and worrying, for about 2 days. It felt a bit like I was high, but without the fun part only the weird feeling (I don't do weed anymore). I also felt demotivated and also stressed cause I knew something is happening to me and I was scared.

Then I had some kind of paranoia attack or smth on the night of the third day of feeling weird, it was cause I read abt someone having a dream within a dream and for the rest of the night I felt like I have never felt before, I've never felt that much paranoia and fear like then, I just calmed down and tried to sleep after an hour.

The feeling of life being less real than before, the one from the first 2 days, became less over the next week, but still now I feel stressed and discomfort mixed with demotivation and a bit of sadness every evening about 3 hours before going to sleep. The stressed feeling is followed by slight stomach pain that feels just like that you get when you're really really nervous. But school is going well atm, family is drama free and loving, I'm healthy, nothing to be stressed about.

Now some days I wake up in the morning with absolutely no stomach pain and feeling normal, that lasts til like 7pm. Other days I wake up with stomach pain and completely demotivated and unhappy. 

I am writing this because until about two weeks ago I was happy, every day, I am generally a really happy person, avoid drama and live a great life. People said I was smiling every time they saw me, and thats probably cause I das purely happy. Now that I don't feel like that, I am worried because this has never happened to me before. 

I'll probably be feeling good again in a month max., I decided on posting this just so I had everything written once, and maybe somebody actually has this happen to himself/herself too. Rn I'm just worried but living, god still helps me daily and I'm thankful.

This happened over the course of about two weeks. I'm a student in 10th grade if that's of importance.

If you read this, thanks so much it means a lot.

I'll probably be adding an update to this in like a month

Have a good one to the person reading this :)

TL:DR Life feels less real than usual, I feel stressed every evening/night for no reason, has anybody ever felt the same, if so what helped?",4.874136584136586,5.908739455301457,5.598911358911358,80.88218610218613,69.20790020790021,7.909305109305109,29.336672336672336,8.101407402915765,1.9872849618849624,1942,71,367,25,33,632,216,481,0.193,0.631,0.177,0.5683,1,1,1,0,0,0,54.0,0,2,1,1,26,42,1,10,30,0,31,14,7,4,6,80,72,36,0,4,15,0,21,8,0,0,6,1,0,2,23,20,0,1,25,7,2,3,9,18,1,6,20,23,32,25,50,48,14,57,0,1,1,1,10,13,0,7,48,239,55,6,0.0,0.0,0.04947624921634417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044942820475438745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109013794989271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05028114518468331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576789922146444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181295207604118,0.0,0.1725691284187601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070334935063836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562497435576878,0.053634270687420285,0.0,0.053158375170194984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609899701044213,0.0,0.22888281811415956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03348711737759375,0.09172277780694807,0.17086899957081653,0.0,0.0455662249545653,0.0,0.04779579827309503,0.05705201376677897,0.3588988386907959,0.10866106713658977,0.3407621543538706,0.0,0.0,0.04312571031451954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026488851661321474,0.0,0.057628379317802174,0.12757519909578632,0.0,0.05589733884794066,0.0,0.0,0.17933668520964574,0.16191446550838892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796678093883625,0.053567726402743376,0.0,0.0,0.09985930673305543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559327039888078,0.0,0.04132756986881375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743351587607923,0.19815712531842514,0.0,0.08953871426709838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04310364300366305,0.04575906498357514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050935338021049215,0.05522756816450351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809371060501845,0.0,0.0745412137989575,0.0,0.1173097568287292,0.0,0.05392042054463631,0.14273659306412534,0.04967559961172187,0.04864837409552554,0.0577227092828869,0.0,0.053994241237960434,0.06871176807426597,0.07711983473188035,0.1618463105679972,0.0,0.0,0.05490356189552239,0.0,0.03514925400277896,0.08853921802395365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04855694126409255,0.0,0.16399072778299295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214227598696653,0.1154162455623426,0.09743986921043693,0.05212842629914791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04822766380732832,0.0,0.050759916878135435,0.05131148297974048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10147397391430037,0.0,0.04295826045909985,0.039031623173064064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097876475179146,0.0,0.2903855227334771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335618100449558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02956379449193898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034422224361847546,0.0,0.09905379230499983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055839296593581125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200634006778005,0.0,0.04558572307762771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048873349124850016,0.0,0.0,0.15446606571548865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crazydoglady-,2020/03/03,"hospitalization experiences 

I was hospitalized for five days in an inpatient unit in the military three years ago for suicidal ideation and it was hell on earth for me. But in the past week or so I’ve been extremely depressed and suicidal, worse than I was then, and I don’t know what to do. The inpatient units around me have terrible reviews and I’m scared of asking my parents for help. I don’t know if I should go to the ER or what to do anymore.",4.857666666666667,5.680782988888887,5.862222222222222,79.75000000000001,69.1111111111111,10.444444444444443,31.66666666666667,10.504223727775694,3.219666666666667,359,15,75,10,6,119,59,90,0.258,0.716,0.026000000000000002,-0.9766,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,1,5,0,10,0,0,0,0,12,15,10,2,2,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,4,1,2,4,0,8,0,14,10,0,12,1,1,0,0,3,5,1,3,6,52,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115377409336218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366642714320997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124379648163857,0.22309384431952367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390144241757925,0.0,0.20553812493813287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334332612522853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13562318792626596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15995368277107902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622978529062113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649786975777609,0.0,0.2278064915652833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389177633443657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.522061374635397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914206042588568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431919949819406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367472287217307
mentalhealth,RightCricket,2020/03/03,"Intrusive thoughts or voices? I have two different “people” in my mind that  have conversations about me in an abusive way and tell me terrible things about myself. One is distinctly male, and one is distinctly female. They address me as “you”, and I don’t control them. I can’t make them stop, and I have no control over what they say what they say. However, they do not have the same quality of “sound” as people I actually talk to, and I can always tell that no one else can hear them. They are almost thought-like, and when I’m distracted or heavily concentrating on something, they often go away. I don’t hear them in the same way that I hear people talking to me. I’m trying to figure out where they really come from and why they’re in my mind, but I’m actually unsure whether they would count as intrusive thoughts or voices. Recently they’ve become far “louder” and more unpleasant. I’m 19 and have been “hearing” them occasionally for about two years. Does anyone have experience with this? Is it worthwhile to categorize them, and does it suggest anything about my mental health?",5.757773109243697,7.013949147058827,6.2310924369747935,76.34205882352943,67.33333333333333,9.75014005602241,30.747899159663863,9.957137785484203,3.0398722689075632,862,33,157,20,14,279,112,204,0.094,0.89,0.016,-0.9132,2,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,14,2,7,2,0,1,3,0,18,1,0,3,2,36,31,19,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,9,1,1,9,13,0,3,4,0,0,2,6,2,0,5,3,9,31,0,23,27,3,18,0,0,0,0,28,10,0,5,4,113,40,0,0.0,0.13003157777275945,0.21419337587447335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989520026418276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131782423676907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767372580023432,0.0,0.09031196373005412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031103868612094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120631340998575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09453683480683783,0.0,0.0,0.2461799140934332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466166462121405,0.0,0.0,0.19207968696659167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167906279561552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735307060701127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062371427239158485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665532678644655,0.4947688265195743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325659652521334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059859228447087,0.0,0.2216252251931432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22310107070427976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282530757759271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030637548832906,0.0,0.10836136312691874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17454953756299568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448816619810721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917529324870928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764200521777714,0.19184644021638966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291065385602041,0.0,0.0,0.26137922809944025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451062436981416,0.0,0.21441263740712235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742232211987338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990290862260006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796071754634268,0.0,0.0,0.070673104965875
mentalhealth,Guest_010,2020/03/03,"I am confused why I do this I don't understand why but when I meet someone or sometimes just see them I have the urge to find everything about them. Most times I know their full name, address, hobbies, friends/family connections, and workplace before they even introduce themselves to me. I never did anything malicious with this info and just forget it when once I learn them. I never stalked them physically or harassed/blackmailed for this information, I usually sweet talk them or their friends into spilling it or use social media. I found that I never discriminated or target anyone type of person. Why do I do this?",5.238839285714286,7.8593080624999985,5.424428571428575,76.12057142857145,71.05357142857143,8.051428571428572,31.735714285714284,8.841846274778883,3.0530864285714285,501,23,80,10,10,158,75,112,0.038,0.883,0.078,0.7311,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,8,0,6,3,0,1,1,0,7,0,0,1,3,27,12,10,0,0,8,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,7,4,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,2,22,2,7,10,2,9,0,0,1,0,15,2,0,7,7,62,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998489421255344,0.0,0.15297902684013792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581863459944295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278452778630955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707402285377232,0.0,0.1752490205400109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990830645089386,0.0,0.0,0.2038286442271131,0.14362509636344736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021652216831174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4301302776983702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197976354274643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623198251593046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481374243703405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895006066324545,0.1575116085841749,0.0,0.1838588517593262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941856417778535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10839919439267848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19352740174850733,0.0,0.1605570377935575,0.2047414707827324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5032347636135031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ActuallyTucker,2020/03/03,"I don't want to be strong anymore I'm 21 M, I'm ready to die and I don't want to be here. My trauma has taken my life hostage. I was abused for most of my childhood, I was held hostage at gunpoint when I was 15, my best friend took his life when I was 17, my dad unexpectedly passed away a month before I turned 18, and in December of 2019, my little brother took his life and I found his body. I never got to say goodbye. Everybody seems to praise me for being strong through all of my personal trauma, but I don't want to be strong anymore. I have to be the one to take care of everybody's emotions. No one takes care of mine. I'm tired.",1.7031620553359694,2.8889518985507285,3.3259156785243738,93.56223320158104,77.11594202898551,6.4674571805006575,23.41501976284585,6.980632752743323,0.5136869565217399,494,15,119,5,11,164,77,138,0.128,0.693,0.179,0.8884,0,0,0,1,1,0,15.0,0,0,0,5,3,10,0,0,2,0,14,5,1,0,2,13,32,6,1,3,1,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,3,5,2,0,2,10,1,23,8,19,17,3,12,1,0,0,0,9,4,0,2,5,72,23,0,0.0,0.18317321553073454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.306639123536669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14524980346691152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315514147834458,0.0,0.16224094400477745,0.0,0.0,0.17172340036062556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31524569749775616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16044819838255314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17390181406444447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950860298911394,0.1194419436535034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364605266141195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32759117782324265,0.0,0.15494769664725744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339855809600392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923542076636127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20951905790489106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349889114188151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294244449102845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074010962646866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324767414855944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17768752832378612,0.0,0.0,0.3435278807066473,0.0,0.16815810666800046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735575169446327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kennethcraigdavidson,2020/03/03,"I don’t want to seek help, but feel like I might need it. I’m using a throwaway account as this is private and I don’t want this to be connected to my main account.

My mother is clinically depressed, and has suffered with it since I was born. 

I 19 (M), have been caring for my younger brother for the past few months, as well as cooking, cleaning, shopping, and generally running the house.

She’s had a few relapses in the past but this time it’s lasted longer than ever. 

I’ve been coping quite well, but it feels like the situation is taking its toll on me now; I’m constantly worrying about her and my brother. I’m starting a new job soon because I need the money, but that’ll mean I won’t be around to help, and I don’t want to leave my brother with my mother.

Aside from the problems I’ve got at home, my personal life feels lacking and dreary. I’ve lost most of my friends over the past few years and haven’t had a relationship in a long time, so I have no one to confide in, talk to about my emotions, or even to hug (aside from my little bro). 

I’ve always been a worrier and quite a pessimist person. Lately I’ve been feeling anxious, and for the past two years I’ve had no motivation and have been feeling apathetic. 

I hope I’m not having mental health issues too. Should I talk to a doctor about these feelings? I really don’t want to, but if I am having problems with mental health I’d like to do something before it gets worse.",5.814478813559322,5.0973495559322055,6.560624999999997,80.86534427966104,67.0,9.137711864406779,31.996822033898304,8.278499904357787,2.2141906779661014,1129,40,235,13,16,374,150,295,0.155,0.691,0.154,-0.6345,1,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,4,12,14,0,0,16,0,31,7,0,2,1,46,56,21,0,12,8,6,6,3,1,4,5,0,2,2,11,14,1,0,8,2,4,1,9,5,2,2,11,6,26,9,34,39,6,28,0,3,0,1,16,8,0,5,22,153,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08187188509267967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115747789573564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759172927040297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05998021193574115,0.0,0.08372624626785401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031947944850213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632921203073116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474680977991822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007106680742362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068027002791654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649884637431396,0.08900321805416657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29850648751252096,0.14058572121473234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760191413030915,0.0,0.051406926322688805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869485761304143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20917693976907809,0.0,0.0,0.1319031623109168,0.0,0.0986974395269288,0.09772767592886697,0.0,0.11353373566022658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269801693102984,0.0976410950124203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802044334161934,0.11099298198370726,0.10418528706349836,0.0,0.0,0.06949875751306288,0.1442113583074995,0.09861687181001366,0.0,0.08707580102411383,0.0,0.0,0.1074089298456167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071801663550208,0.0,0.0,0.19831649110361466,0.10438073342596273,0.0,0.0,0.07853733904155802,0.0,0.0,0.14591615589318616,0.0,0.09502976457067272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667447958971381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.375713720520214,0.0,0.1718281002068475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18829998748881768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209308759418362,0.0,0.0,0.06303386598807696,0.0,0.0,0.10563858456887977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139272734848273,0.11059924185234282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574868863199928,0.0,0.0,0.06964394543357154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398021884147941,0.1581711167635031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474893851177248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611686961955702,0.0,0.0,0.08498102666088468,0.0,0.0,0.23214187466634176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17693646652413572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999241210493405,0.10027213075402386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672532174894333
mentalhealth,Money_Creme,2020/03/03,"I feel so worthless and insecure out of nowhere I get really bad bouts of it. It's been happening for years. The first time I remember it being awful I was seeing this guy who was a complete dick. He was rude, would leave me on read for days if not weeks at a time, didn't reply if he didn't feel like it, was basically just using me for sex. I was naive and inexperienced and went along with it until I couldn't handle it anymore and I ghosted him. But for *months* afterwards I missed him, and have only now been able to accept he wasn't a nice person to me. I thought it had to be something I'd done. 

Then I met another guy, and he was so sweet. He made me feel so safe and secure and I thought I was well on my way to falling in love. About 4 months in my insecurities started again, it's like my gut could tell something was coming. 3 weeks ago he told me he was in love with someone else and couldn't be with me anymore. I fell to pieces. I've self-harmed on and off for about a year, but after he told me this I cut myself more than I ever have before. I bruised my knuckles punching the walls. I couldn't eat, I drank all day, I was just a mess for about a week. I was miserable. 

I started to feel better, and I was glad of that. But I think I was just keeping myself busy so I didn't have to think about it all. I was going out a lot, seeing my friends, I slept with this random guy off Tinder (I was trying the whole get over someone by getting under someone new). The last few days are the first times I've had nothing to do and no one to see and I keep having these clouds settle over me. I just sit and cry, I want to hurt myself sometimes. I'm just so sick of feeling like this and I don't know what the fuck to do about it. 

​

I've tried everything to handle it healthily - exercise, meditate, eat well, talk to someone, hang out with friends, think positive thoughts and mantras - but it always comes back. Now I'm even sending myself under because this boy from Tinder has started taking longer to reply -- I signed up to a casual thing, and now that it's too casual I'm taking it as another sign nobody wants me. I just don't know why tf I'm like this",1.5662387676508305,3.304700403508772,3.161157466837828,92.2080616174583,78.95614035087719,5.940008557980317,21.648267008985876,6.807656815369643,0.3677481386392811,1688,48,377,17,41,557,210,456,0.131,0.763,0.106,-0.8656,0,0,2,0,0,3,56.0,0,0,0,3,26,30,3,3,14,1,42,12,3,2,3,75,90,31,1,9,13,0,5,4,2,1,2,0,0,5,26,28,3,4,15,4,0,8,11,11,2,3,34,9,54,19,59,48,7,59,0,4,3,5,26,18,2,4,35,252,80,1,0.0809353295914862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174428632450358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06734467781418929,0.08769339579795175,0.0983452842669356,0.0,0.16973549991612005,0.0,0.0,0.16053219796587045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06223427261610566,0.06757761953791544,0.049337425704400265,0.0,0.06887000431365721,0.0,0.0,0.07158072188387417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394372398784386,0.08485915321758894,0.0,0.0,0.06462027491109383,0.0,0.0889036591259542,0.15658977592124734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282494231832954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656340953985472,0.06761108247902778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05345702187590379,0.07321063925056502,0.0,0.0,0.07273945549664923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20461667238005932,0.1156404312636025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768710000937173,0.0,0.0,0.12506086974723316,0.0748234080328029,0.12685610768703748,0.0,0.045997412962243966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24041610278988934,0.07157084466472054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664294427198801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14387807938935315,0.0,0.0,0.0889598810035073,0.06597309591160358,0.0,0.08569882789833874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15816365534796625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880832294390615,0.14609458976511336,0.07658296579386485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920361582367867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781678456594183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765963158094105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05484387395398437,0.061554965239955885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066960797809348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095723184111098,0.0,0.0518492446038644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09168395102757433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19348493685590326,0.0,0.08443320010342269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274304968471178,0.12461594172394225,0.0800471104769988,0.0,0.17185932857012756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217065906535017,0.06505275214984052,0.07074104543201394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053769836657786965,0.1555802735305503,0.0,0.1927608333947871,0.14158212464842498,0.0,0.0,0.15467435166403407,0.0,0.10989955211610844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990213861959818,0.0,0.0,0.09547550871028204,0.06424269740022273,0.1947643183634018,0.0,0.14554116249015522,0.07502786138767698,0.07303154627109787,0.0903614051216438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05749413599374234,0.0,0.0983452842669356,0.10423939737580476
mentalhealth,Smashyland,2020/03/03,"My Psychiatrist is taking me off Ritalin and I don’t want that To keep it short, I take Ritalin and Prozac since for 5 months, I’m 22 and I’m well mentally but actually living better than ever but I don’t like change and that actually is just not wanting to top the boat while it’s smooth. Anyway, I have always been thin it runs in my blood everyone is thin with my family, and she has not weighed me and I am certain the record on file is not correct also but regardless yeh I love being skinny and Ritalin can have this effector make it worse but Im also not skin and bone without presenting big headed I’m very cut, and was cut before as I train and work out not wanting to be “Big” I want to look lean I also eat all day all night, not always healthy and not always proper meals but I love food and I eat if I want the thought of feeling negative around food has never once entered my mind’ but my mum who I don’t even communicate much called my doctor saying she is concerned I’m not coping I’m not well and I have lost alt if weight and now my doctor is begging a reduce schedule for me to come off. 
I hate her like hate hate already and I know what she is playing, never been there for me once and if I spit bars on it she will then pretend she is a good mother by saying how “worried she feels” when actually I will never hear from the lass she is doing it because she feels guilty not for never caring but because she doesn’t like the idea of people hearing about it, the other is that what happens? This non stimulant med is meant to resemble a tic tac with improvement for adhd between stimulant so I don’t want that I don’t even have the free up to wait over a month for it to work only to monitor how well I works i am pretty much worthless to the company I’m staff for because of the type of role if mans head is not in the game but also is weight loss that serious to risk mental health and work etc? Like I could bet I am a low scale bmi but not even near like where I look unwell? Can they even do this without me saying I’m comfortable? I wouldn’t even fight it without seeming like I’m addicted or something?",2.5427128589263432,4.0169206089887615,4.10678838951311,87.63543851435708,75.49438202247191,7.1017478152309605,23.821785268414477,7.793537801064563,1.0911260923845192,1681,51,358,24,36,561,213,445,0.128,0.713,0.159,0.9248,0,0,1,0,1,0,15.0,0,0,1,8,24,30,6,1,15,0,41,26,7,5,9,87,80,42,0,13,30,2,9,6,0,3,8,5,0,1,21,22,10,2,8,4,2,3,27,12,3,0,6,16,49,19,44,68,5,37,0,4,2,2,26,19,0,7,21,247,70,8,0.0,0.0,0.2090077170639233,0.07782887402580978,0.08580047478063503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787839164056952,0.22837172552828125,0.17821400772129392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06355487844961001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305614734647996,0.0,0.06075015813614721,0.0,0.0,0.06314127924459262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290020339079198,0.0,0.07278988981705223,0.0,0.07552429465532369,0.061498721084029574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700147631429399,0.0,0.0,0.04604255870424562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14614745755909778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14610566078045156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962203212766147,0.23577191295490005,0.0645790276339257,0.0,0.06821904119826483,0.0,0.0,0.06730293720410915,0.0,0.10829529048177346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17265732259830485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059881035040540535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06313256655999927,0.0,0.0,0.21145732857138191,0.14653956578904612,0.07588738738360103,0.16093012911512816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059397183026762,0.07711665743445133,0.0,0.0,0.06345735100741852,0.0,0.0,0.03923570858310667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20927399024152454,0.0,0.06304129945923974,0.0,0.11990422608187945,0.0,0.0779338590252889,0.0,0.12886988347852024,0.0,0.0476553610714236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793014939805702,0.0,0.14389464155609774,0.0,0.07208654667351166,0.0,0.11397037318747452,0.0,0.1049640933448614,0.0,0.2202506352032944,0.0,0.0,0.06699746495729804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15206236358510988,0.0,0.054297569887777855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04949489537560405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263231553861747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032366295951842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499347749304919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590570015731266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05496179535241548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073572551954286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05667804258128795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058906676163662776,0.25265653647397285,0.0,0.0,0.17387480532128202,0.19257255879485166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064608228725342,0.0,0.20789972638591334,0.07250302534694705,0.07275553451264873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jessicax17,2020/03/03,Out of touch with reality I am a 16 year old girl. I have a wonderful boyfriend of almost a year now. I no longer have suicidal thoughts and do not self harm. He has taught me to love myself and how to love. Everything is going amazing. This summer he is getting me out of my house because it is a hellhole. I need to get out. I have a place to go and everything so that is not an issue anymore. But I feel so out of touch with reality. I feel like everyone is fake and like it’s all a dream. I forget things super easily from my childhood and entire past and time goes by either super fast or super slow. I just got off of Fluoxetine because it made me even more depressed. I don’t know what’s going on but I want to stop it because I want what’s best for me and my amazing boyfriend. Sorry if this seemed kinda shitty but I do not have more time to type so I did it super super quick. If anyone has any questions or can help please let me know!,0.98856783919598,3.001731613065332,3.055324120603018,90.87946859296484,82.11557788944724,5.7890452261306535,21.005276381909546,6.961326702584282,0.4520570854271355,737,22,161,9,20,249,109,199,0.084,0.659,0.257,0.9896,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,6,8,15,0,0,7,0,18,2,0,2,1,43,38,18,1,5,12,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,11,13,0,1,8,1,0,3,5,3,0,0,5,4,23,12,22,32,5,23,0,1,0,2,8,7,0,9,15,112,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14614612217914294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924983650031813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447414782130988,0.10205043220034084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669061540863745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15316371760456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570504137642652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09639746375158056,0.0,0.0,0.13945983787168148,0.2623378100196272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759167321003944,0.10426548178112284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525039070428768,0.0,0.24883731602113845,0.0,0.11672817369820893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978260569278936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16840472196949788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233208779324642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041871775588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924200658420272,0.0,0.14260591684864865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26344804530782595,0.13809979325523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821880175593657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314817075440554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932414950585004,0.0,0.0,0.1524848911209223,0.16020738612567473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16349547760835256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328658344457642,0.15225588820293834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337715267209704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201929883487105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964373207970564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969615533798345,0.0,0.0,0.11586663328055873,0.1702072337706032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17216815615782974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15827468602907946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879718169363668
mentalhealth,imjustnotokayokay,2020/03/03,"I think I'm ready I don't know how many people are going to see this but I wanna get it off my chest. After retaining my self-hatred feelings and depressing thoughts from sixth grade to current 19 y/o me, I think I'm finally ready to try therapy. I've been hesitant to, mostly because I'm afraid of being looked at/treated differently and just the unknown part of therapy in general. It's probably not a super big step for some, but a giant one for me :). I'm just so mentally exhausted from masking what's going on in my head and not letting anything out. I went through so many years of crying, hurting myself, coping wrong, and worse, that it's just really taken a toll on me. I really hope things go well, because I just wanna have a normal working head instead of one convincing me to hate myself. Thank you for anyone that reads this, I just wanted to let somebody know.",3.1017241379310363,5.032803425287359,4.870781609195401,80.80237931034483,75.0919540229885,7.8583908045977,27.11724137931035,8.648137234880735,2.22848551724138,692,27,128,14,15,235,110,174,0.184,0.7170000000000001,0.099,-0.9589,2,0,0,0,0,1,22.0,0,1,0,2,10,11,1,1,5,0,7,4,3,1,0,30,29,9,0,5,9,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,6,1,0,5,3,6,1,2,4,3,18,5,25,22,3,17,0,2,2,0,1,8,0,3,4,87,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577749998271252,0.0,0.1127203959298346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16699980991233998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15046279738528873,0.0,0.0,0.11797808533159115,0.0,0.0,0.14311180601398055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925968451839565,0.0,0.0,0.15005160296095826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156482652365452,0.0,0.2335415491834949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523642441701136,0.28115583006964234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13604906332091873,0.0,0.0,0.1466367064868667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15055794871037542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28013651632512565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502617750839834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777463476753323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804059392232235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420837241738107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18563831400621436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833273759168206,0.0,0.09496260152408796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14768436844463625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13701406321336482,0.0,0.17550194136236666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915293077723734,0.0,0.14289687966334844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611001382617726,0.3132902635623458,0.0,0.09100142916523443,0.17553865539032718,0.0,0.10874443378387384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299838839790003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079258077544482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231587690443139,0.12697904695049753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972088396151832,0.0,0.1395912604757652,0.0,0.14976284134404394,0.0,0.08820869400155848
mentalhealth,gooner6000,2020/03/03,"How to overcome trauma caused by the person you loved and trusted the most? About 4 months ago i was in a situation where i was traumatized by the person dearest to me, a person i cared for the most. It was really unexpected and happened out of the blue. On top of that the person made remarks about my body that shattered my self esteem and ego. No need to say this experience destroyed our relationship. The person who hurt me moved on like nothing happened and i am still reliving that particular moment everyday 4 months later. Ive been depressed, ive been suicidal, ive  tried proffesional help, unfortunetly nothing seem help. Please give me some advice on how to cope with this.",5.280551181102361,7.287112527559056,5.9015826771653535,75.3712716535433,69.39370078740157,8.859527559055119,30.02283464566929,9.3871,2.9032431496062987,549,22,94,12,10,178,81,127,0.182,0.6629999999999999,0.155,-0.6202,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,1,0,1,6,8,1,0,9,0,9,2,1,4,0,15,17,6,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,6,7,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,6,2,14,4,17,11,3,15,0,2,1,1,15,7,0,4,8,65,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609532529503446,0.12345653211646808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15470018045487216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199743945236673,0.1430710643706455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199550681149877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623507931801013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360272556615455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24631615242467064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867026364848205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490939276167377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680414336683392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569873043129573,0.13178286189008334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22233171676351127,0.14802446363882785,0.0,0.10326868034737482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672711456647657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6080362056668681,0.0,0.15287921395039086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922143155343297,0.0,0.0,0.14952637911018588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107549600600974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267883137110614,0.14529143175411613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654795294733964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112230759615433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523413424478865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455678131663174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TBurkeulosis,2020/03/03,"Need some help helping a friend in need Hi everyone,


My best friend of many years has always had pretty severe mental issues, and has been in and out of mental hospitals, on various antimanic meds, antidepressant meds, antianxiety meds, you name it. He is Bipolar Depressive, and will have spurts of extreme sadness and despair, and spurts of extreme happiness and energy. 

Recently, he had been in a pretty good place mentally after moving states to live much closer to me. However, he has been experimenting with his sexuality because he felt like he was missing something by being straight, and has since decided he is bisexual.

Well, the other night he was raped (not full on restrained sex, but uncomfortable actions where ""no"" did not resonate) by a man (similar age) in his own apartment. Before this man left, after a physical struggle, he decided to drug my friend by placing DMT (or so my friend thinks) underneath a layer of marijuana, so that it looked like a normal bowl. He hit it when the guy left, and started tripping out, says everything looked like teeth and like an alternate dimension.

For those of you that dont know, DMT is the chemical released in your brain during death in humans. Not something you really want to experience until that time comes.

Anyways, he is extremely shaken up by the whole thing, and has only gotten worse since the incident. He hasnt been sleeping much and has been regularly hallucinating because of it, drinking too much, and having people over constantly for sex to i guess try to cope and regain his sexual empowerment. Im not sure. But i am having a very hard time getting through to him, hes just not very responsive to my words, and if he does seem to get a bit better, hes back at square 1 the next morning. This is getting exhausting for me, as he is also my business partner and i greatly rely on him to produce work. Our jobs are not interchangeable ao I cant just pick up slack when he struggles like this, but im depending on him to produce so we can make money.

I just dont know what to do in this situation, and need help navigating the options I have. 

I have reached out to his parents (in another state) to have them give him a call as I think talking to his loved ones might be able to help level him out, so he knows there are others besides me that care about him. Im his only real friend.

Thanks in advance for any help you may be able to provide",7.818947368421052,7.296082824561406,8.12263157894737,70.6684210526316,62.859649122807035,11.284210526315787,36.54385964912281,10.686352973137794,3.906975438596492,1912,80,342,42,24,630,247,456,0.085,0.753,0.162,0.9892,4,0,4,0,0,0,58.0,2,5,1,6,17,28,1,2,17,0,45,11,3,5,1,66,72,31,1,6,14,1,2,5,6,3,3,1,0,5,17,23,1,1,9,1,1,5,11,8,1,1,12,6,38,20,62,53,10,54,0,4,3,4,60,32,0,9,20,231,55,4,0.1488348714120297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951159644782107,0.06192126796388436,0.0,0.0,0.050606408162696175,0.0780331699135063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722241454375721,0.0,0.0907283561774415,0.0,0.06332375668268947,0.0,0.07809650758253342,0.06581617441320313,0.08124456584410165,0.0,0.0,0.08307446957154924,0.0759885222239498,0.0,0.07587353536438246,0.0,0.0,0.06410403149065208,0.0,0.08041881071982636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409562832865386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512319947658317,0.0,0.1744333608306168,0.07290075597823012,0.08630059944680152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07110904890624306,0.06688159274861147,0.14558906341366715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145240849009166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874736311301813,0.0,0.11664011607000928,0.07138798531942513,0.0,0.0624178143588825,0.0,0.08204548558250807,0.08197919532606153,0.07368496124152958,0.0,0.07921874409564691,0.06666340531856756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494021925076052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411508019757337,0.07767246862029831,0.07384782213951685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269362943984903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617095232741266,0.0,0.0,0.1817830005804366,0.0,0.06571195911903574,0.0,0.1249838069658836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06716464117535137,0.0,0.049674216194623484,0.07544759952750403,0.0,0.0,0.2479829845781798,0.0,0.22498581607196053,0.07894513919423267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790939570460484,0.1641161334714506,0.16553875690831815,0.0,0.0,0.07914378712074796,0.0698357222347474,0.07291328667422102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050427180372769394,0.11319562646501555,0.0,0.0,0.0826317556417678,0.0,0.0,0.051591679889554536,0.0,0.15550076273798089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514185713281645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470333388349897,0.04767371488061995,0.0,0.07347823997335216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05917973177058234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774683854333613,0.0,0.08407052026687513,0.0,0.12311774364915433,0.08364831570189052,0.07447117908809225,0.0,0.0,0.11458035542690224,0.0,0.0,0.05267304401715684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559452311499689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07013755245874283,0.0,0.0,0.059813915938130936,0.0,0.06851357650029292,0.0,0.0,0.049439637579788163,0.09536737591212033,0.0,0.0,0.08678681041868501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0505245539556105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228043561636179,0.0438933316686825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691021187445134,0.0,0.0,0.08308440936592483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05417677950136042,0.0,0.07583772464382547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04792238872320406
mentalhealth,sashabobby,2020/03/03,How can one tell whether they feel emotions to the same extent as other people do? Can mindpower/convincing yourself ever 'turn'  emotions genuine?,7.923750000000003,10.887850541666667,6.789999999999999,67.75500000000001,64.41666666666666,8.133333333333335,41.16666666666667,8.841846274778883,4.619316666666667,119,7,14,2,2,36,22,24,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,5,5,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,5,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,13,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7489932164052044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011503610534644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16833724003943248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255990742859907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308087649934861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29099174097139313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621275656480526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonisshady,2020/03/03,"Is there a name for this phenomenon? Hello, I have a question about something I tend to experience.

So I had a bit of a depressive bout a while back, and one of the symptoms that I had (and has been coming back) is this feeling that I can't breathe. Not like, hyperventilating, but I suddenly become very, very conscious of how hard it is to breathe, and that I have to think about breathing in order to breathe normally. It gets worse when I am with friends or with other people in general, and has been enough at times for me to refuse going out, or coming late to outings. 
I am able to cover it up generally well though; I pretty much had it a few times a week and no one noticed. 

Is there a name for this???? I would like to know, especially as it has been coming back. Thank you!",4.666538461538462,5.1435351410256445,5.622205128205128,82.53946153846154,69.38461538461539,8.547692307692307,29.06153846153846,8.548686976883017,1.9125507692307693,606,21,128,9,10,200,89,156,0.083,0.7859999999999999,0.13,0.813,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,0,12,6,0,0,9,0,19,5,4,1,0,28,29,14,0,2,4,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,12,11,0,1,5,0,0,4,3,1,1,2,6,2,13,5,24,22,4,20,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,3,12,103,25,0,0.15553689443673754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35879481330696683,0.0,0.0,0.17177827999219586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16980600502243934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4019437871382463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13396369926791804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16071118958579866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521449279492224,0.0,0.0,0.07864412718799038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016741881587488,0.0,0.0812616077946167,0.0,0.08839520145753682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933050685579373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854790095412347,0.0,0.1754523916349026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15197494029957553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433751371544673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523931329384315,0.0,0.1770797852078209,0.0,0.0,0.21079164999359998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782969868104472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582369381650623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17423691805965494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973990018254235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16166238733300028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319747535654595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09966176165052423,0.15281420908014792,0.0,0.18138962788126725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566684541032679,0.0,0.0,0.124762314876305,0.0,0.13984634732872325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15850538331967368,0.1104889472363478,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carguy141,2020/03/03,"Looking for advice I’m going to apologize in advance because this is my first time posting on reddit and I’m still figuring it out.
And for whatever context is worth, I’m a male high school senior.

Many thanks to anyone who will take the time to read the book that I realize I’ve written lol. Pretty much my life story now that I think of it.

As far as I can tell, I don’t have any good reason to feel bad about my life. My parents and the rest of my family are kind people and have solid relationships with each other (and myself). I have a wonderful girlfriend who is currently a freshman in college. I have a few close friends at school. I’ve always gotten A’s in my classes (with the exception of calculus this year) and have always been a somewhat above average athlete in school sports. I have a good job. I also have a few hobbies that I spend time on when I can. I’ve always been sort of naturally determined to do well in life.

However, the past few months I’ve started to get feelings that I can’t do anything. My grades have still been pretty good, but most of the time when I get home after practice I just don’t want to do anything but sit and veg out. I just feel exhausted, especially during the swim season. I just feel too mentally tired to do homework and, as a result, don’t do it until the last minute. And during this whole process I feel anxious about all the homework that I have but I feel dysfunctional because I don’t do it until last minute and can’t seem to figure it out. I also find myself becoming anxious over larger things like research papers and procrastinate until the absolute last minute. I also tend to shut down, even though I know that the amount of homework that I have is doable. As a result, I often find that I’m up later than I need to be and lose sleep because I don’t like the thought of just not doing my work. I guess this really boils down to me being disappointed with myself because I always procrastinate.
To add to this feeling, calculus has been extremely challenging for me. There’re only four students taking the course, and it’s very clear that I have the least understanding of the material. Math and science have always been the classes that I do the best in and enjoy the most, so this has been quite the blow for me. This has also caused me to pretty much rethink all of my future plans because I had always planned to go to a good college for mechanical engineering, which relies heavily on math and science (especially calc).
My girlfriend knows I’ve been struggling a bit and I really appreciate her efforts to help me, but I feel like sometimes she puts me before herself and that just makes me feel like I’m being selfish. I hate taking away from the positivity that she almost always has.

I’m not struggling with suicide or self harm or anything else severe, like some of the things I’ve read here. This combined with my otherwise perfectly fine life only further makes me question the validity of my feelings. Is this really a big deal? Is this just part of figuring out life? If I’m not having thoughts of self-harm, is it really that big of a deal? It seems like I’m pretty well off compared to a lot of the people on this thread.

Any thoughts are appreciated.",5.818117900032457,6.2742486882911415,6.488227848101268,77.40831385913665,66.8639240506329,9.203570269393056,31.07854592664719,9.127657967737557,2.591396170074651,2569,94,481,43,39,844,266,632,0.07,0.762,0.168,0.9953,4,0,0,0,0,1,57.0,0,0,0,11,25,29,1,2,38,1,55,9,1,6,4,96,102,40,1,3,17,1,10,6,3,1,7,0,4,2,38,30,1,0,29,5,2,5,10,9,2,2,13,11,61,20,78,85,20,61,0,2,1,0,19,28,0,16,32,341,99,27,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904574897269835,0.0,0.0,0.06050602612138761,0.0,0.0,0.1932845819432949,0.3519439476642301,0.0,0.0,0.08218094480085661,0.0,0.0,0.13652410902626028,0.0,0.04224994836909828,0.0,0.14917170240524427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056770448079742734,0.0,0.0504516147714566,0.1841699080608474,0.06673369125887027,0.051416474133003584,0.0,0.06341138416844641,0.0,0.06596748735395687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207221397040979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458922527930415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050476597294156635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03990956019099248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05696248102062485,0.0,0.3055224969842001,0.08633400421633655,0.0,0.0,0.11045309870072442,0.05139672406464674,0.0,0.0,0.04668352382500441,0.0,0.06313821568142057,0.0,0.06868083768333108,0.20272353413924446,0.0,0.0,0.0665639784614855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05965630706869044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040501012736937424,0.06384139838191479,0.060610317225918676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05996161370907871,0.0,0.0,0.06292242078094766,0.06641503025991341,0.1477611630731579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133967081549586,0.17712103204487567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0507410410764715,0.06759913236363889,0.0,0.05137042449813135,0.0,0.0,0.0806671361854399,0.06126057190418674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06089329923113961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04822995465945786,0.0,0.08883735871543384,0.044803718006583115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191052939691792,0.0,0.0,0.06709383253759259,0.0654334317123202,0.057681657943738064,0.08378095089373079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05786960245692657,0.24589220424691546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06074292803427087,0.0676888410817616,0.06426848744667316,0.120880939628825,0.0,0.1548369494416721,0.062126057121882065,0.0,0.06487288984097599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834573004936432,0.0,0.11001569565781703,0.12607106656514205,0.06826205451313014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060467755765410885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597609979305043,0.0,0.04276850185603485,0.0,0.09650955767892576,0.0,0.0,0.126336815629358,0.0,0.06609417806850988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13629425101351916,0.0,0.05281334259878207,0.05563040979294687,0.0,0.0,0.08028619841694097,0.03871733511712516,0.059366389331563615,0.14391000120982828,0.14093515693765002,0.06944863511241353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290363800665785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0498562256322428,0.03563971044331776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086570777951641,0.0,0.0,0.06746137008935142,0.0,0.0,0.06552737865662378,0.043989477690015474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03891115103175704
mentalhealth,PurpleStitch98,2020/03/03,"Will reading self help books make me a better person ? I have recently decided to slowly start learning more of self improvement and be more emotionally intelligent. Especially in my anger management.... so I decided to look into self help books to see if I can help improve my self, being  independent and still feel worthy of myself.

It’s not an overnight process but do you think self help books really help with the process ?",6.1603070175438575,8.400054065789476,6.428947368421053,71.53096491228072,67.55263157894737,10.329824561403509,32.40350877192982,10.504223727775694,3.939314035087719,343,15,56,10,6,110,56,76,0.028999999999999998,0.701,0.27,0.9489,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,2,2,1,0,3,0,6,0,0,2,0,14,12,5,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,1,4,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,8,1,8,9,2,5,0,0,2,0,12,2,0,1,3,35,9,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869672570839186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16368546758016864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357706116286833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4876802069763554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221964575310546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713279499114064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270586117953807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555498165090933,0.0,0.09322102146156366,0.0,0.14367910289068525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159570956718698,0.0,0.7590225488379664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299669281206666,0.0,0.11620894857557584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324052277967948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AmISickOrSomething,2020/03/03,"Do I have some mental problems or is it okay? Hello guys, I just want your opinion if it is possible for me to have some mental illnes or is it okay.
Sorry for my bad english, but hopefully you will understand everything what i am going to write over here. 
So,  I [19] am student on high school in Europe. I have a girlfriend of 3 years, I am pretty social type, going somewhere out like every 1 or 2 days. I used to smoke weed every day for about a year, but recently I just smoke on weekends. I don't like drinking heavily because I don't like the effects of alcohol.
So, my problem is not when I am in work, school or with my friends or girlfriend. The problem will come when I am alone, mostly at home, just me and my thoughts. Often when I am home I feel a feeling of emptiness and need to go out somewhere, or feeling the need to smoke some weed, but I got used to live with that and I don't take it as a major problem. 
But sometimes, prolly 1 time in a week when I am alone, me and my thoughts watching some tv series or something I start to have some really bad mood combined with feeling of emptiness. My thought are going back to the time, when my gf cheated on me, but mostly my thoughts are going 4 years back, to the time when my parents did something that I won't ever forgive them(but in front of them I am just trying to live a normal life). It is a feeling of hatred towards them, seeking of some kind of revenge combined with feeling of emptiness and desire to just get high(weed or xans), but I can control that desire because I know how harmful xans can get
 Yea, as i wrote it, it sounds like I have some major mental health problems, but for real, it only happens when I am alone with my thoughts, and that doesn't happen often so that's why I didn't go to some psychiatrist or something and decided to write it over here. 
Could you guys write me your opinion, if it's normal or it's not? And if not, what kind of mental health problems could I have? 
Once again,sorry for my english and thank you for your responds.",6.55396246089677,5.4056935863746975,6.771324296141818,81.3743795620438,65.69099756690997,8.899131039277028,34.65658672228015,7.2636822038024595,2.3178294751477235,1588,62,321,11,21,513,162,411,0.15,0.74,0.11,-0.9749,1,3,8,0,0,0,49.0,0,6,2,3,24,23,1,0,12,3,36,5,0,5,1,101,71,42,0,19,28,1,6,4,4,3,4,1,2,2,18,17,2,1,16,3,0,8,9,10,0,0,9,8,51,12,50,57,12,44,0,0,1,0,23,14,0,28,26,232,69,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627196106492813,0.0,0.2217508760315756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097570059686123,0.11918058778834535,0.08701199355084034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061478239104637726,0.0,0.0,0.0800466170266818,0.11396498425973105,0.0,0.0,0.09205444871418657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991463723450897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0645575197669355,0.1202632441046054,0.0,0.06414202749943637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216518446068096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055139660392426085,0.0,0.07457491391411589,0.0,0.2433645377449733,0.0,0.05708046222349221,0.0,0.0,0.14133344066771547,0.12622308086575834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15172422659718832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15081093873513002,0.14317823652910816,0.07088571074716486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486400609318382,0.03922264123860815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05041017066592431,0.13946952807761887,0.0,0.12604060745675152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28769343568541994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583870251361796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985330931070775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600585981721689,0.0,0.0542794862319251,0.0,0.0,0.07924704129913256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045804011266441,0.0,0.07260812554630837,0.0,0.4097440664569535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812337647470593,0.04572093165255098,0.0,0.0704684666631057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14445886424012955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275190310355496,0.0,0.16483047143431265,0.07058595539944063,0.1597839338323246,0.050515481150793004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053660750078883684,0.0,0.0,0.0657071628734165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28329583057785984,0.12484784867610454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048454996300679565,0.0,0.0,0.07429784542694368,0.0,0.12328013364945305,0.0,0.0,0.04209539831858991,0.0,0.05724806057949194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439959465276594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051957621488900714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787825838161955
mentalhealth,YumboStary,2020/03/03,"Can anyone relate, or give me some closure. So recently I've been having a really weird feeling. When I'm talking to someone I genuinely care about, or even someone I dont even know very well, I get a weird feeling in my brain almost like Deja vu, or something like my brain buzzes then i get a sense of impending doom, or like a complete loss of intrest. Ive always been an extremely empathetic person, and even when I just see someone in public I feel like Im feeling how they feel, and its always only depressing or like a completely worthless feeling. Is it just a phase, or is this something i have to live with forever. I know this makes no sense, because it doesn't make any sense to me but I'd like to look for answers before getting fucked in the ass by the American Healthcare system.  Thanks",4.112573839662447,5.620321797468356,5.153860759493675,81.56323839662448,71.53164556962025,7.79831223628692,30.25527426160337,8.344100000000001,2.3253907172995785,636,27,118,10,12,209,99,158,0.14,0.7,0.16,-0.4237,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,11,16,1,0,9,0,10,4,3,3,0,26,30,14,0,0,9,0,6,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,9,0,0,0,3,7,1,0,2,8,14,9,13,28,1,8,1,4,2,2,5,3,2,8,10,72,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359721169928238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20540712291305346,0.0,0.0,0.08393656205268545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630505335754206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752417191291554,0.0,0.10502975068133233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27557716990182723,0.0,0.0,0.125845005415018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25882779576666626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10630998879070193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446589191663893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445728471667589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3744591852344595,0.08817834255521732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410895017548996,0.193461079254378,0.11840520355280007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332546864431605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13566768603478252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618096757854609,0.0,0.10899085974381102,0.0,0.10365002625009287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16478082841342626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387399807478433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777422450683304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907235215141965,0.0,0.12187213186949085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09835764680182628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137452516842522,0.1900447287701072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992082751776066,0.0,0.11363766515259953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184259104428828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109783000781733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dumbmuddafugga,2020/03/03,"I don't know how to live with myself I recently embarrassed myself so hard when my ex broke up with me and I keep replaying my actions and words in my head. I was crying so hard on the phone (she broke up with me on the phone) and I was not in a good place at all. The next couple days I texted her trying to get her to talk to me and I further embarrassed myself. I acted like such a pussy and told her I was going to see a psychiatrist to get help over her breaking up with me, and see didn't reply. I just feel so ashamed and humiliated because I know she has told her family and friends (who I met). I think I am at the lowest I've ever been in my life right now.",2.548620689655173,3.042302655172417,4.469137931034481,88.84715517241379,74.17241379310346,7.731034482758621,22.77586206896552,7.908726449838941,0.7830551724137926,515,12,123,7,10,177,79,145,0.19399999999999998,0.75,0.055999999999999994,-0.9548,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,3,7,0,8,2,1,1,2,23,21,13,0,0,2,1,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,12,0,1,4,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,8,5,32,3,21,13,1,24,0,2,2,0,17,14,0,0,7,88,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569703288083065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100041264398524,0.2084804674396361,0.12240182238198034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168009103976853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17892146738324766,0.0,0.09596585770064003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14663484517758746,0.0,0.198319700885034,0.0,0.10786465090032564,0.15919071444666522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3400373828885984,0.0,0.1947840260014632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721532664240254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869817024579906,0.0,0.0,0.2086123086194912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340575462084078,0.09272405973805184,0.0,0.1675921181684363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20184872131738985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19829497212872085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18739928076281434,0.0,0.0,0.16208356024868342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024834633716526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254971853542348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12161272276424777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36271376738448025,0.0,0.12885808200600887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,just_chrispy,2020/03/03,"After Stepfathers suicide, I cannot remember what is real.  I love my stepdad. I hate him. He made sure the family was well taken care of and loved so deeply. He was also an alcoholic with anger issues as well as a lot of internal problems he couldn't cope with and took it out on us. 

He always had to make a point. His final words were him making a point and we are almost certain it would have been murder suicide if my mom would have called 911. He said ""I bet you will call 911 for this"" and shot himself just moments after holding a gun to my mothers head, and did so right in front of her. 

She almost certainly has ptsd but while trying to recall memories of the good and the bad, i started to realize I cannot remember what is real. It is causing loads of anxiety. 

I know some of the bad is real. I remember my mother giving me a pistol at 10 years old and asking me to stay up late and watch over the family. I remember him abusing my brother and mother. 

As i rememeber these things I don't know if my brain is victimizing me and making these scenarios up, or if I am vividly remembering them for what they truly are. What can i do? Is this a coping mechanism?


TL;DR: Abusive stepfather died by killing himself in front of my mother. I cannot remember if my memories are real or if I am making some of it up to cope with his death by victimizing myself.",4.064514832535885,4.9474245309090925,5.802373205741628,79.24166507177034,70.96363636363638,8.989473684210527,27.92822966507177,9.276330184999452,2.3647454545454543,1066,37,208,22,19,367,148,275,0.207,0.711,0.08199999999999999,-0.9931,0,0,1,2,0,2,26.0,2,1,2,0,6,18,6,0,12,0,30,5,2,6,3,58,47,25,6,9,9,6,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,13,15,1,1,9,0,1,3,5,9,2,0,10,3,41,9,35,33,3,25,0,0,2,2,32,12,0,13,9,159,54,0,0.0,0.1977518917456147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891838814337262,0.16712850923014785,0.0,0.0,0.06673584043626497,0.0694380272939274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383988787599226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801554372626271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935641960837267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093159062713352,0.1704258731681449,0.0,0.08508399121593599,0.08572730065495361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866091002043958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573406013465241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141663649335956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005393035491343,0.0,0.0699948505513047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239071631116329,0.08564493750244281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710130094862904,0.0,0.0,0.0923263136950626,0.0,0.09172511987108443,0.0,0.09413651223120753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07094716853217517,0.15063581029513295,0.07896347924800466,0.2228171155628474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773695768201747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875679254702823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577765878298141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798514633924301,0.09754990801704452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3799426338310459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5672031911504467,0.07126681110681858,0.0793811370366266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05906714103869488,0.08894780361998418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18256398837400067,0.0,0.07865170469054357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05544122426028976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271727867017608,0.05665784102853681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038143721937637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15006518022500662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856258026474945,0.0,0.0,0.05373979321762095
mentalhealth,qzxyw,2020/03/03,"I wrote these notes in preparation for a counselling session, and I thought it would be good/insightful to share them here. I’m basically wondering if anyone else has had experience with these kinds of things, and if so, if you had any advice? I’m not quite sure how to convey this properly as I’m in a bit of an anxiety state of mind where I can’t really think at my normal level - I’m sure some of you can relate. Anyway, here are the notes:

“Feeling alone:
    - Have a fair few close friends but none doing my course anymore
    - Have always felt disconnected from my parents
    - No matter how much time i spend with friends I feel like I’m drifting away from them
    - Getting closer to my brother but not quite

Feeling like the world isn’t real:
    - Maybe a symptom of anxiety?
    - Derealisation?
    - Less emotion, worrying that even though i’m often more outgoing and energetic than i used to be, that i’m missing social cues and being mean or insensitive

Anxiety:
    - Struggle sleeping at night
    - Fluctuate from outgoing to very socially anxious
    - Have had another panic attack, not quite as bad
    - Felt quite awful the week after last therapy sesh
    - Feeling better about uni because of positive self talk, main worry is whether i can maintain this mental state or level of motivation
    - Health anxiety still in effect, worry about heart sometimes while working out

- Also unsure how normal these things are, often think I’m being dramatic or ‘spiralling’ on purpose to feel special
- Used to (and sometimes still do) get low sleep every night, worried that it’s affected my brain”",7.558053817271593,8.249379081560285,7.6170004171881525,69.99794117647059,63.14893617021277,10.323237380058409,35.737171464330416,10.194018383442646,3.8586593241551945,1239,54,199,26,17,400,174,282,0.18100000000000002,0.662,0.157,-0.6956,1,1,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,2,2,8,17,16,1,2,8,1,21,6,4,8,2,53,47,23,0,6,12,2,7,2,2,1,2,0,0,1,12,9,0,0,14,0,1,1,7,6,0,0,7,7,16,10,34,35,8,27,0,2,0,0,14,15,0,10,11,132,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365034473240615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865898037171455,0.0,0.0684567568043364,0.07122862492415928,0.0,0.0,0.058213033813874736,0.0897622993549511,0.2619445053916218,0.09670712102925312,0.0848952589001225,0.05985566797764885,0.08771047752933386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738586818527784,0.08042691701106937,0.0,0.07147500101811369,0.052182846577994366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570897294860586,0.0934563987128125,0.0,0.0,0.09556135441762308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151039385625194,0.09629194968943038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056540030843522215,0.0,0.07212429183587991,0.0,0.0,0.08373624387827552,0.0,0.0,0.21641746138279125,0.1223097232311308,0.16438477349129815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322734635169335,0.0,0.08944815840987852,0.0,0.0,0.07179980697662297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099207724806194,0.0,0.10144006886189713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914244092589163,0.0,0.06977794023662398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364268750752438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599980554499101,0.0932468558647292,0.0,0.0,0.0862677764479479,0.0,0.08643471398357347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292811769648778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16066539426382098,0.1677456976990495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043677699695423,0.0950520963631612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641976754553712,0.0,0.09743505256598606,0.054839528769881685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930268785169004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17132981469369976,0.17452313148953275,0.0,0.0,0.16932728148645393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13672546983097816,0.0,0.0,0.08949093172377859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16135979063271588,0.08897438300525047,0.0,0.06880451779649023,0.0,0.0,0.0978945890203992,0.0,0.1137417729756771,0.10970200178729674,0.08410459718954076,0.06795928818521903,0.04991584774460787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786716262477634,0.0,0.07063151088357084,0.0,0.0,0.0686656319478961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283289499083132,0.06232006600627125,0.3477363556997736,0.0,0.060809976095453674,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,matefan,2020/03/03,"Unable to sleep properly as memories of traumatic incidents keep popping up in mind Hi everyone. I could do with some help here. In 2019, I faced a lot of disturbing events and trauma that has caused me to slump into depression and feeling hopeless. I am trying a bit daily to get out of this slump and be hale and hearty and happy. Sometimes the flashbacks of those traumatic and shocking incidents pop up in my mind as I sleep. Sometimes I wake up and cannot sleep again. Sleep is a really important thing for mental well being, and I really need quality sleep as I cannot afford to break down as my family depends on me. I have constant headaches. One trick I have tried is to focus on my breath when I wake up. I dont know how to get over this trauma. Will time repair me? Thank you.",3.4323126550868466,5.31295523870968,4.590322580645164,83.38856079404471,74.03225806451613,8.382133995037224,25.471464019851126,9.057496981413335,2.0918933002481395,622,21,120,14,13,204,96,155,0.16399999999999998,0.748,0.08900000000000001,-0.9233,1,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,1,0,0,5,10,1,1,4,0,14,9,9,3,0,23,21,14,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,11,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,7,1,1,0,1,18,3,29,17,3,19,0,2,0,0,3,13,0,3,5,86,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489971050934185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14019906713599511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14748272537146684,0.0,0.10896546357137707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175470995615698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599495641674629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304092442724984,0.0,0.0,0.12865799671090272,0.0,0.06900667194932658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426067860796167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528188336973746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147739126058108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12130667689041932,0.0,0.0,0.07500397271706401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602752878206285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753631779766246,0.0,0.2756049310803257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119567302273996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248007931981303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17486081518096008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6828758318624728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699577032959349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564932130634598,0.0,0.0,0.09066899182391304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958060565852715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18531731192871465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270885771745807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lightupmyjass,2020/03/03,"People with bipolar I/II (or anything related), do you ever feel/notice the shift? I’m 26F, and just recently diagnosed with bipolar II a few months ago. Now that I know this, I’ve just been annoying myself. I guess since I’m more “aware” now. I’m on Lamictal 100mg and felt the more stable than I have in a long while. I was even really productive and cleaned my whole room (it was a disaster. Could barely even see the floor). But now I’ve just felt a shift. I’ve been slightly more irritable and today I just feel mad. Or fed up? But I don’t really even have a reason.  Does anyone feel this? Also any tips or anything helpful I should know? I’m still pretty new to this, and still trying to understand myself. Thanks in advance!",0.8845578231292492,3.335687013605444,2.846700680272112,89.19889455782318,87.02721088435374,6.259863945578233,19.7312925170068,7.594959193182576,0.8579496598639453,569,17,116,11,18,190,86,147,0.10099999999999999,0.818,0.08,-0.609,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,1,14,3,2,0,8,0,10,4,0,1,1,28,25,12,0,2,9,0,4,0,0,1,3,0,2,0,5,7,1,0,8,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,7,5,11,1,9,16,5,20,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,4,13,73,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310629245770093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12910303441274368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978433186987926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128821861193789,0.0,0.2657017507263882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12889622900835251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16385759851385484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127671185001658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198876146828994,0.14603118503707674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448858427016624,0.0,0.3100142931053053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17784370621932902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820943064484696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17744575073628033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428687938436712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885939340887112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591918401876367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18379983340391406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119217567962972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16424191411205408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068444343687694,0.16598659675581348,0.15940193693484506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864630471348446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335443446647623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25785143586541004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486317147014012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530256799904335,0.0,0.0,0.10960675931016016,0.0,0.0,0.1680641148013108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18024133113176144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-Jellybeanaddict-,2020/03/03,"burn out+ failure anxiety+ low self esteem= failing education Last schoolyear I \[F20\] already was struggling with my anxiety and low self esteem, but somehow made it. Over the summer it found help by a psych. She helped me a lot with al lot of personal issues but is retired now. In the mean time PT-school started again and I am doing worse. They expect more from me as expected but I feel like I can't keep up. During the lessons I am doing fine. Even the practical bits and intership are going way better but when I have my performance assessments my brain shuts down. I make the most illogical decisions, question everything I know and my performance is chaotic and shaky. Even my teachers and fellow students don't understand why I am failing, given the fact that my performances during classes and extra practise are great.  
I don't know what to do anymore. I do NOT want to fail this year.  
I am recognising signs of a burn out since this isn't the first time, but it is the first time it is caused primary by school.  
I know I am not the only one so maybe more can learn from this post.  
Does anyone have any tips or something else?  
I am hesitant to go to a psych again because I don't want to burden my parents again with the costs if it won't help on the long run.",3.087862755369308,5.316232425702811,3.891611664047496,86.44411210057625,76.14859437751004,7.222001047668938,26.488737558931376,8.18289091462,1.7913867993713986,1010,39,196,18,23,322,147,249,0.11900000000000001,0.77,0.111,0.5951,1,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,10,9,12,0,2,15,0,26,1,1,3,1,47,42,17,0,5,9,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,10,12,0,1,11,0,1,3,8,8,0,3,4,1,27,4,22,37,7,30,0,5,0,0,11,10,0,8,16,134,37,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13876549448848866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551261288437978,0.0,0.1923929884702666,0.0,0.12470773183298832,0.08792557661697932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665450958794477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121344605278166,0.13728370299766454,0.0,0.0,0.14037579853935633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291773224800578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004248570121417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504590168914572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661100771848328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301374583661125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358171489848015,0.08983403998578812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21392152057222932,0.0,0.13787564457620832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293040557324904,0.0,0.0,0.13863706400525908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528576982407458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124772103066876,0.0,0.11177015681893003,0.0,0.0,0.20732261424163426,0.10250099677680152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06143387733672216,0.0,0.0,0.11128258152258272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138120575011533,0.0,0.11898532608675395,0.0839374334991238,0.0,0.12633026657250002,0.1369758929545026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520976118684655,0.09563664106518187,0.0,0.0,0.13962771887374933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097978677442412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204313463337193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408659800162494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545263691145869,0.0,0.0,0.26236413653383783,0.0,0.0,0.1040196324349008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680656989402624,0.0,0.0,0.08900472857113867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13145859096823065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199731375602832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090758347734213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483382684312508,0.09981251339146394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134675610641156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12814744663661046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809772679817035
mentalhealth,Binkybaby1313,2020/03/03,"WHAT IS GOING ON, PLZ HELP. POSSIBLE PTSD, BURNOUT I am a senior in college. I am about to graduate in 8 weeks but feel like my body is completely giving out. Since I was 17 it has been nonstop stress. I was in a physically/emotionally abusive relationship when I was 17. He pressured me into sex and I ended up getting pregnant. I was so devastated because I was only in high school. I told one of my closest friends about the pregnancy at the time and he told EVERYONE. The whole time was talking about me and my parents found out about it through the whole town knowing. Everyone knew what I was going through before I got to process it myself. Fast forward, I graduated high school and a month after my son is born I go to college full time while taking care of him. My sons dad still is not involved at all is quite abusive still to me. I am terrified to leave him but end up doing it anyways. I am going through terrible post partum depression. I manage through the whole first year of college whole at a community college. The following school year I transfer to IU while still taking care of my son. During this time, I have been sexually assaulted a couple times and was with someone for a year who was emotionally manipulative and very controlling. He would blame me and make me apologize for things I didn’t do and ignore me for days if he was mad at me. AND my grandparents died in a house fire on my birthday while in school. That was truly traumatic. We had to search through the house to find items afterwards. I never got to deal with and process any of these things that have happened. I have terribly suppressed all of these things. I am scared to trust anyone. I have dealt with such terrible stress and anxiety that I think my body and mind are finally giving out. I think I have PTSD from all of this. I can’t sleep anymore. I think all of these problems manifest subconsciously that I haven’t dealt with and are now coming out because my body knows I am about to be safe. I put my son first because I love him more than anything and want to make sure he is healthy and safe even if that means that I put my issues on hold. I have been doing this for so long that I just feel too burnout. I am having a hard time remembering or processing anything. All the years of so many traumatic things, I don’t know what to do. I also feel shame for the things that have happened to me. I have never openly admitted or talked to anyone about it.",4.1025489864864895,5.695157314583337,4.784876126126129,83.86368243243244,71.6875,8.105855855855856,28.80630630630631,8.685302888712808,2.142601914414416,1941,76,384,35,37,623,212,480,0.19,0.7040000000000001,0.107,-0.9944,2,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,1,0,0,6,20,22,2,5,17,0,50,6,4,4,8,71,86,29,1,5,8,6,5,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,28,27,0,6,15,0,0,9,7,13,0,3,22,5,64,9,67,62,12,70,0,1,0,2,30,27,0,4,36,282,92,15,0.0,0.1609666796150772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054321840117544144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046193235893906434,0.0,0.05196458394247032,0.0,0.06736612857502249,0.09499339956475072,0.0,0.11179758932517946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422447604946647,0.0,0.057801557872428265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22635743021846816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851384614864326,0.0,0.0,0.0585137881921619,0.07122100985173081,0.0,0.07618680792444857,0.0,0.07516082284232582,0.0,0.04380781389200366,0.07003058296679449,0.05850611783462159,0.0,0.0704983358757692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15281927277350946,0.12032774416502262,0.0,0.0,0.044865673734755036,0.0,0.0,0.12981585493114398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030390157349909,0.04852763657189272,0.0,0.07441158872373163,0.062084782011928276,0.1155587103382874,0.0,0.07447933069878834,0.05248085267534552,0.0,0.03548947384286828,0.13032507801182955,0.15441974507278436,0.0,0.10865613996430043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013666504289885,0.0,0.060849969779946236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04553057499723361,0.14353890831500424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675913073287145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07089897891793648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199403342702144,0.0,0.0,0.07192573617107778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033186093746538914,0.0,0.0,0.0601139687557662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061307494963248374,0.0,0.09068467294284646,0.06886813131250878,0.0,0.07399329200220947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858771774773753,0.0,0.0542193248845084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478021973713417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04602963780664019,0.05166215569623624,0.0,0.0,0.07542578735120513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076578392388499,0.06505605901361047,0.0,0.0,0.06499773433883925,0.15880793505084706,0.13657240910885265,0.0,0.07224958068717148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292903995701869,0.0769489599152284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800758165531155,0.27498625555101675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05619058120887477,0.0,0.0679768603978773,0.0,0.05755500768364712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627416954629384,0.0,0.15562213938395006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402115114220214,0.0,0.10214650940161593,0.10919559119017178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256410723608567,0.1305761815162398,0.0,0.0,0.23765549176666556,0.0,0.0,0.12981585493114398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056047552069175284,0.04006557860068645,0.0,0.054487586826600334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033558681823333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048253962840373234,0.0,0.0,0.1749731140588822
mentalhealth,lubbaloba,2020/03/03,"what options do i have for help as a minor hi im 15 years old and im rlly tired of my mom not caring about my mental health. she treats me like a baby when she suspects im sad (she’ll say things like “are you sad todayy? :(((“ even though she knows i am depressed and have been for years... but anyway) and cares for 1 second when she catches me crying, then its like she forgot about it. i was sexually abused as a child, i KNOW i suffer from depression, disassociation, ptsd, suicidal thoughts, fits of appetite problems (months of starving myself a few days at a time and months of stress eating, and i always feel guilty after eating) and im not sure if i suffer from bpd or c-ptsd, but its definitely one of the two. i know people say you cant self diagnose, but there’s absolutely no other way to understand myself when i have no access to a psychiatrist/therapist. i spend a lot of my time searching for answers about what my symptoms are and what theyre rooted in (most of it stems from trauma as i’ve found) im really at the last straw at this point and i feel like im losing my mind. what sort of options do i have when my parents dont care? thanks

sorry this is very unorganized i just wanted to write this quickly",2.6008605851979354,4.302346710843377,4.1989443488238685,86.07710843373495,75.86746987951805,6.670567986230638,21.89730349971314,7.447530270364453,0.7420122776821572,957,25,198,12,21,320,143,249,0.278,0.649,0.073,-0.996,1,0,0,0,1,0,31.0,0,2,0,1,13,20,0,1,9,0,15,6,0,1,1,38,29,22,1,3,8,2,2,4,0,1,4,2,0,2,13,8,2,1,10,0,1,1,6,10,0,3,5,4,31,10,29,23,3,24,0,7,0,0,17,6,0,7,20,130,44,0,0.0,0.1087591298883288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637873259249912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560946953660388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28076578495568144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082977641694572,0.05919858361491464,0.0,0.15812153133937096,0.09316747876272087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758015347701896,0.0,0.0,0.1878533343874818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060628095813545675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282611550569013,0.06557659686733998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006457637175065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757115967864904,0.0,0.0,0.061526593352809675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5949100599591743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15134031039634327,0.07482315773838298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793807607336897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269235376791393,0.0,0.07803872063611858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250527348636836,0.0,0.09268428125756667,0.10750629368544948,0.14653583242626345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632081186384027,0.0,0.062200989284197185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192473402664157,0.0,0.0,0.06363737778400154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677360432634444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783304778739771,0.2146010947954544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05880464080098756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599419735517918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957596208333115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275421448301092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051480251144678,0.0,0.0,0.1004061217782995,0.0,0.08651336673310991,0.0954075782647272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451022258658764,0.0,0.10657819426569648,0.06098287361265189,0.0,0.0901856879222298,0.07287301004339436,0.10704991682972052,0.10550200211591634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966795712581739,0.09555925381881296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573844487556099,0.054141608406202746,0.07286063227283879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822275072332965
mentalhealth,dan874,2020/03/03,"Mental Health/Fatigue in The Work Place Project This is a post in which people can write how they feel in their workplace with stress, anxiety or physical pain while doing their job. This is part of a school project. Feel free to comment personal stories or talk in general about how work in area's such as retail or fast food makes you feel or how change could make the workplace better overall.",8.18756756756757,8.026266270270277,6.454729729729731,81.73587837837839,61.972972972972975,9.562162162162162,34.71621621621622,8.841846274778883,2.760227027027028,320,12,59,4,4,93,55,74,0.099,0.823,0.078,-0.1531,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,3,3,5,4,0,1,4,0,5,2,0,5,0,16,10,9,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,1,0,3,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,4,3,10,9,1,10,0,0,0,0,8,7,0,4,2,36,7,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16142340439547054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866227373370884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232224429510017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684757051060185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32008162951742064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551562349550261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242956134611495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093965934199662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817039514668381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21265020456200115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245313699900741,0.0,0.0,0.2285051526934357,0.0,0.1462889724395165,0.184247313247366,0.22046235791505933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20209091896426745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213555147396884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417132365235044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16960324453293055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072381213522338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trashman1215,2020/03/03,"Just trying to get it out Looking back now, I realize that I never felt safe growing up. Mom did a piss poor job of taking care of us. Sure, we had everything we needed, food shelter, that sort of thing. But we weren't protected by her. Until recently, I never even thought it affected me, seeing my father drunkenly beat the hell out of my mom and older brother. I now see that it did, how could it not? We weren't safe. He never hit me, but I was so little at the time, it would have started eventually. But she kept us there, maybe she felt like if she took most of the beatings, it would be easier for the kids. It wasn't. I had no idea what was going on with my sister. And what did mom do when she found out? Had a stern talk with my father where she told him not to do it again. We moved out to the country, maybe mom thought the country air would stifle his abusive behavior. It didn't. It all happened again. After the second time (or the second time she found out, who knows how many times it actually happened) , she finally got us out of there and away from him. But the damage was already done.

Fast forward to present me. If I were to describe myself in one word, Anxiety. I have social anxiety, trust issues, self esteem problems. I'm scared. All the time. And most of the time, I couldn't even tell you exactly why. Have been for as long as I can remember. I'm short, 5'3"" when wearing my big boy shoes lol. I graduated from high school weighing around 90 pounds. I've always been so anxious, my stomach literally hurts nonstop. Food has never been something I enjoy because I can never get enough to make myself feel not hungry. The pain was usually too much for me. I would eat just enough to make it another day. 


In spite of everything wrong with me, I found someone who was, I thought, perfect. She was broken in her own way, aren't we all? We fixed each others broken parts, and for the first time ever, I felt whole. Like everything would be ok. My anxiety symptoms, while they never truly went away, I felt were mostly under control. I felt like a person for probably the first time ever. She was amazing. Kind and caring, comforting when I needed a shoulder. And OMG such an amazing cook. Hell, last summer I hit my highest weight ever! I got up to 145! I looked good. I felt good. Married for a while now, kids, good job, house, dog. I was living the American dream. I thought everything was great. 

It all came crashing down last summer, though. She said she wasn't happy, hadn't been for a long time. She said that she had found someone else, and spent the night with him. World as I knew it destroyed, felt betrayed and unwanted. You know the drill. Turns out that she's been in a relationship with this other guy for a while, and it's not going away. Shows no signs of remorse. Unwilling to take steps to fix our marriage. I don't sleep much, and I haven't weighed myself in months, but I can clearly see that I'm losing a dangerous amount of weight. My anxiety symptoms have gotten worse. Obviously, it's time for me to move on. 


Why tell you all this? Because now, I find myself repeating a cycle that started with my mother. There is no physical or sexual abuse. But emotionally, the situation is not safe. I know this, but I'm so scared to take the steps necessary to get out of a bad situation. Financially, I'm not ready. Emotionally, I will likely never be ready. But I know that I need to go. If I don't, I'm going to end up... Well, I try not to think too much about where that would be.


Thanks for reading",1.9686725503233973,4.259073771101576,3.2907791815269327,89.00448528078344,80.24463519313305,6.284237038828106,22.291422353865684,7.470278962992933,0.9053017832315784,2742,87,559,41,71,891,304,699,0.16699999999999998,0.711,0.122,-0.9874,2,0,1,0,2,0,122.0,11,3,1,7,34,40,6,2,31,2,59,17,6,6,20,132,128,40,0,16,22,9,10,4,0,7,3,2,0,6,35,35,8,6,26,4,2,13,28,15,1,5,57,17,92,25,77,56,18,103,2,3,5,0,62,34,3,9,61,392,127,5,0.0,0.1143745165127431,0.047100604763651736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053262676045913455,0.0,0.04016113691371411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05061105697214234,0.14769327859451467,0.05452678515585984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04296692848534602,0.0,0.0,0.1360423465594905,0.037113536279094264,0.040300052189028,0.058844950276594324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05520338861668018,0.09842070558612456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05413436707426395,0.03853643364761157,0.0,0.0,0.03112754481461536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04939282444107347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04938811646878705,0.040320007882679934,0.10858539468600667,0.0427493056167086,0.09974325732595173,0.0,0.06375840955037547,0.13097794518795575,0.0,0.0,0.17351329465351972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024404714555046017,0.0,0.32440016785528875,0.05287298901594982,0.0441142038985578,0.08210998484520991,0.1167267566790257,0.21168449170318146,0.0,0.0,0.07565090033122916,0.0,0.10972260672181028,0.12144956671998128,0.07720537880433337,0.05321338028079625,0.0,0.04779087887264818,0.08536284038779343,0.05138000128830338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050995626171063235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055692426002091316,0.0516696977467974,0.05448638261068611,0.0,0.05037711192389287,0.0957930156551238,0.0,0.0,0.05026155957186144,0.1061028154494136,0.07868638245884522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432122067209316,0.04837516183096015,0.04261971813282663,0.08542769383756238,0.08106248383805206,0.05399725211033134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443579284704824,0.04893409767064925,0.09697926834113847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22611398923429166,0.03852542081468227,0.1025981328362485,0.10644308042820713,0.10736577107236543,0.26057973304892057,0.0,0.0,0.04529432446011333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032706256859994474,0.0,0.05135837381410499,0.0,0.0,0.05226732037931898,0.0,0.0,0.042143965845044436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05203885754311086,0.04618399570150624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04827901146244862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047656802788174385,0.05181956728416754,0.05467591247771714,0.0,0.0918239425034204,0.0,0.09664527204794976,0.04884771820712764,0.1153851394352358,0.0,0.05035191227393654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850590015258044,0.0483008071027714,0.04920105776170847,0.0817911656306261,0.037157486379363065,0.0,0.0,0.06832577568240174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04549008668122365,0.10033360552704164,0.10886996290982587,0.038794342337074655,0.08437313543478814,0.04443680203514815,0.0,0.0,0.032065752512761087,0.03092687187334563,0.047421050826102124,0.15327109179890433,0.28144263595847674,0.0,0.0,0.046120183627268115,0.05362524639673298,0.06553882359447477,0.05249949369541894,0.0,0.0,0.1741739851003228,0.0,0.05315812497495797,0.0,0.0,0.03831126452360933,0.0,0.1175498483812902,0.04339688556737512,0.04474301921597118,0.08710502519312162,0.053887209510731435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04918712653658272,0.20572047641993887,0.0527712394211567,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,edwoodscissorhands,2020/03/03,"Has anyone else experienced this?   

Hi, 

So I have been struggling with depression and anxiety for many years but have only recently plucked up the courage to try and get some help.

I was reluctant to turn to medication straight away as the thought of taking medication made me anxious. However, I have been seeing a psychologist for counseling (mixed results so far). I have made an appointment with my doctor to discuss medication options further 8 but still not 100% sure it's the course i want to take)

I guess my main problem is the persistent self-doubt and fear that I am not good enough. I worry about not being good enough and I am depressed when I think I am not good enough.

Following an emotional chat with my wife last night, I am currently feeling really guilt and ashamed of myself as it was made clear to me how difficult I am to live with and how horrible it is living with someone who ' never smiles anymore'.

One of the worst behaviors I exhibit is getting irritated and angry with people. This behavior is at its most extreme toward my wife's sister and family. .... I act like such a d@#k head to them most of the time. Being hostile, withdrawn, aloof and uninterested to them and their kids.... They are very rich and everything seems to go well for them all the time... It looks like I am jealous of them but I am not usually a jealous person ( it seems reserved just for them) Within the wider family it's as if the world revolves around them ""they have such good high paid jobs"","" they have such big house.."".blah blah 

I guess my feeling of hostility /anger towards them come from fear of not being good enough and feeling bad because when I compare myself to them it looks like I actually am not good enough....

I need to stop being like this... I REALLY want to stop being like this but it seems impossible....

I am finding it hard to attribute this simply to anxiety/depression what if I am just a 'jerk' a horrible person? Such feelings make me even more anxious and depressed, as it is as if I am not even good enough at being a normal person...

Has anyone had a similar experience? Or is it just me?",4.629462633738235,6.369734124688282,5.433392325637518,79.14737913281316,70.59600997506234,8.86496661571877,29.64371329740166,9.370254747372089,2.7286607835250587,1668,67,308,37,31,543,193,401,0.261,0.634,0.105,-0.9977,3,0,0,0,0,0,63.0,0,0,12,1,19,34,6,5,18,0,37,5,1,8,4,75,67,32,0,8,19,3,5,6,0,0,4,0,0,4,20,21,0,2,10,1,2,4,9,18,1,1,10,9,48,16,47,51,13,32,0,3,3,0,24,14,0,13,19,231,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.06850354712524649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370161126938084,0.1586085025980476,0.0696179854622542,0.09816875705636037,0.07192659317652103,0.0,0.06249149082252237,0.0,0.0,0.06595374125471302,0.0,0.058612761728516996,0.042792314924439336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604697366743698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24184723967491295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185107363575942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058641785470512714,0.07896379185906698,0.0,0.4352024966307994,0.0,0.09273080961872307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308982770390556,0.06866754026676447,0.13235367560191424,0.15798551327418262,0.14197775353321532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06416009859792066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335157077653187,0.0,0.03989538880651978,0.4121538220314902,0.0,0.0,0.1546629826196362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628840101268576,0.0,0.07204384741214764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04705253181820425,0.0741685016173461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06966111576622863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722109446293614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714770494360993,0.0,0.12397300986801398,0.0,0.11789801234091413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19927037193225608,0.04685800101718442,0.07117019585276425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21215261655008588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052051250687762785,0.05414136130940022,0.0,0.0,0.06587647665522277,0.06877956257549775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047568276869091736,0.05338907371237618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04866675659805695,0.1838836994640076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717042258471895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994183105443089,0.0,0.06931248658101459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05593906473542547,0.19171805853586465,0.07323227828203502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059478906877331074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05606056153389725,0.11737807126570785,0.0,0.07338664684537066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616119500664239,0.0,0.10556097488402147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04498032319209517,0.0,0.055729716808683834,0.08186654490820311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047660129983108465,0.07635574019616645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731365950787096,0.05792106133576309,0.08280971246412347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06311682430557235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128991909985552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04520549112923601
mentalhealth,Hillside_Ricet,2020/03/03,"Is ""How Are You/Is There Anything I Can Do to Support"" Enough? TL;DR: When someone is upset/depressed/anxious/etc., is it enough/appropriate for the main response to that being ""how can I support you"" without attempting solutions or pressing if they say ""no""?


For context, I am someone that wants to help and be a friend to others but has genuine difficulty with determining the most appropriate social behavior, especially when it comes to emotional interactions. I can pick up easily enough when someone is upset or off, but I am at a loss for how to address that and how to help, to the point where this is honestly a big source of distress and self-doubt/self-loathing for me.


I try telling myself that the best I can do is explicitly ask how I can support the other person when something is going wrong, since I really don't think fast enough or have enough social-emotional skills to determine what else is best whenever these moments happen. 


But it still feels wrong. Part of this is definitely self-loathing, being this aware of lacking the knowledge/skills necessary for daily healthy interactions. But another part is knowing that people may still reject help or not know how they can be helped, when they could still definitely use something. 

For example, I have a friend that suffers from depressive and anxious tendencies but rarely admits to it, instead normally saying that they are fine and there is nothing I can do. I don't want to push, especially since I can't tell what is helpful and what isn't. But with that, during those rare times in which they do say they spent the day in bed feeling awful despite saying before they were fine, I don't know how to respond to that aside from again asking if there is anything I can do to support. They reply that there is nothing, I don't think fast enough or am not sure/confident enough to do anything despite their distress, and the conversation stops. I've now even gotten paranoid that they purposefully do not share anything with me because they know how inept I am at this kind of thing. But I want to be normal and try to be a normal friend; I just don't know how.


So am I just hyper-fixating on this, that asking how I can support is all I should do and is aligned with normal healthy interactions? Or is there more I should be doing to try to help others when they are not doing well? And if so, what?",10.25845990815966,7.815840118568237,9.397791122100557,69.58800423878489,59.447427293064884,12.274060991404689,40.52855292593901,10.5429385540328,4.15446129753915,1891,76,341,32,19,599,186,447,0.121,0.7120000000000001,0.168,0.9786,0,0,2,0,0,0,57.0,0,1,12,5,35,25,0,3,13,1,66,0,0,12,2,76,93,44,0,14,23,0,3,0,3,3,0,4,2,1,32,15,0,1,10,0,1,3,13,9,1,0,3,7,39,16,43,79,15,30,0,4,0,0,40,10,0,11,17,273,71,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679169707225814,0.0,0.14391861124176522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096683084021268,0.0,0.17864385826771664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0388290062314817,0.0,0.05420132462279376,0.0,0.13369182061002094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486919289809666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05085674863208642,0.0,0.0,0.04107919629114442,0.0,0.05486200029716482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053210541600293766,0.14330075723040858,0.0,0.460711085562543,0.07103882101518412,0.042071166176608964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441407863079307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14763607610449606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036200385590521744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056326910733629734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25616792002051025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06633046338373919,0.17503060427861886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24963754062459886,0.12223768368692955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13795495444703668,0.0,0.04415937297499956,0.05561762920097043,0.0,0.0,0.06021410830028594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040805830727433226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20261715481349807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19934910706137707,0.0,0.0,0.10538137880530901,0.0,0.0,0.1298618263382063,0.16191039324651826,0.09807388830401348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15260515097047508,0.053253415580147984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36141213113654935,0.060033523723392074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134770226393148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04231735427705455,0.08162873415957445,0.0,0.0,0.03714214325637051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297379321993943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0550136237815951,0.0,0.0,0.11271015065348627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057271114418555015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06140148671067066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392850040450877,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crawling-shadow,2020/03/03,"Where can I go So I've struggled with things like anxiety and depression, but I never liked self diagnosing because it makes me feel like I'm lying so I got myself diagnosed before saying anything, during this I was told I also have psychosis due to hearing a voice in my head.

Now before I continue I find the mind fascinating and live knowing as much as I can about mental disorders, I enjoy helping people and letting them know that just because they think differently to others doesn't make them strange or weird, no one thinks the same, it also comforts me because then I feel ""normal"" too, knowing that everyone is different not just in looks.

Anyway recently I took a lot of interest in a YouTuber channel called DissociaDID, they have Disociative Identity Disorder/DID (just putting that there in case someone doesn't know what it is), anyway I really enjoy watching this channel and getting to understand more but recently I've been comparing myself to it and noticed similarities, now before I noticed I had a voice in my head I couldn't distinguish the voice from my own until it named itself, then later on it showed itself to me in a dream/nightmare.

The more I think about it the more I see connections but as I said I don't like self diagnosing myself and I don't know where would be best for me to go to get a professional diagnosis and it's freaking me out, not because I might have it, whether I have DID or not I'm still the same me, what's freaking me out is not knowing, if I know I can learn to deal with my own emotions better but by not knowing I don't know what's best for myself so if anyone knows where is the best place for me to find out whether I have DID or not please let me know.

I live in the UK just so no one tells me any places that aren't in the UK which I can't use.

Finally thank you.",7.506308539944904,6.267660085399449,7.9108126721763075,74.26500688705235,63.84848484848485,11.041873278236917,35.86914600550964,10.125756701596842,3.4324038567493105,1453,57,282,27,18,481,170,363,0.08900000000000001,0.763,0.149,0.9824,3,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,4,4,22,18,0,1,15,0,30,5,2,3,1,67,64,30,0,5,21,0,2,4,0,2,3,6,0,2,23,12,0,0,21,3,0,4,17,5,0,2,9,11,51,13,35,49,12,34,0,1,3,0,16,17,0,7,17,217,74,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277818981046303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0543304437896972,0.0,0.06111844845478374,0.0,0.0,0.05586352044375563,0.0,0.06574569333706894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948097892892421,0.0,0.20395091814898103,0.0,0.25153047229177844,0.07065946970418083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815803825096151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236687856585218,0.06881231169143147,0.2432712180493107,0.0,0.16694378747509198,0.09156508184037143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986963944756697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763418374234137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807932928447666,0.05707606276103878,0.0,0.08751962403634242,0.14604275686777052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348230326077835,0.0,0.09081084186183856,0.0,0.06389827634390335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16398793520202015,0.0,0.0900459867042853,0.0,0.05355105131152137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4829822636839067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339340669359506,0.0,0.15612807078828606,0.0,0.1410951707835035,0.0,0.06709057158484302,0.0,0.0,0.06792275185961401,0.0,0.0,0.10665930694321267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805140407928763,0.08475457166754127,0.0806698442238518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058731049342520276,0.0,0.061618933254375535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782788458418186,0.0,0.1819189741782604,0.0,0.0,0.10827605389055156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05538821991167685,0.0,0.16694378747509198,0.08769927179242645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031521772315221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05118193882166993,0.0,0.157770746100128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599718755270099,0.0635346630433469,0.0,0.0,0.06366492110433711,0.0,0.16669307008145348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769365794060939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380319806920451,0.0,0.0,0.08352222375579975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983059998549057,0.07355536881639785,0.0,0.0,0.05307781263345394,0.15357793739401582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763418374234137,0.08876482095768244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831721411129983,0.0,0.06900249000089602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0567541798056817,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MxDragon00,2020/03/03,I have a question about exercising I heard that exercising is really good and helps with mental health. Does exercising temporarily or permanently help/boost mental health?,8.190000000000001,12.270925777777775,8.460740740740743,50.433333333333366,69.0,12.488888888888884,31.222222222222207,11.20814326018867,5.632022222222222,144,6,18,6,3,47,22,27,0.0,0.7759999999999999,0.22399999999999998,0.7233,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380543188071517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22816493044046346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5783079885631693,0.0,0.0,0.36467046781236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5482822876921685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30473461865374873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742686755584417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bmaidman21,2020/03/03,"Effects of exercise on mental health Hello, I am conducting a survey for a research paper I am writing for college on the effects of exercise on battling depression and anxiety. It has been a struggle at times for me, and I have found that running has helped immensely. There have been studies done on this before but the results have been inconclusive. I would greatly appreciate if you could take two minutes to complete the survey. The link is https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/5V89RWN Thank you for your time",8.629457364341086,10.713777837209307,7.837209302325583,64.40294573643413,61.32558139534884,9.919379844961243,39.91472868217054,10.125756701596842,4.659091472868218,418,22,58,9,6,130,60,86,0.079,0.838,0.083,0.517,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,2,1,5,1,1,7,0,14,3,0,3,0,12,17,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,3,0,1,5,0,8,2,12,10,0,8,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,1,2,50,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19639621634453855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21845661802146876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26917442222962,0.0,0.0,0.20497641685054635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211194491318999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627218767735354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814889995330212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830435249458836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728898575235535,0.0,0.0,0.17207936596485796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25872143966529443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683878459129489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19302750486262746,0.0,0.0,0.23636064875002424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994003212402442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507859507367004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18237220442236352,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anon91274,2020/03/03,"Apparently asking for help is “ridiculous” and I’m manipulating people by telling people I’m suicidal when I go to get help Over the past 4 years I’ve been seen on and off by the children’s mental health team, over summer my mental health got really bad and after my 7th failed suicide attempt over the past 4 years they decided to admit me to a peads psych unit for assessment, there I was diagnosed with BPD and autism, I really though I could get better at this hospital but very suddenly I was moved to another hospital against my will, in the hospital I didn’t get any support, I have a physical disability aswell and they didn’t provide for that leaving me stuck in my wheelchair sat in my own piss for the 2 days I was admitted there before I discharge myself, I wasn’t given any discharge plan and had a really severe suicidal episode because of the way I was treated in the second hospital. I called up my friend who called the police to do a welfare check, they knocked my door down restrained me and took me to the hospital against my will, the hospital sent me home 2 hours later after seeing me for 10 minutes, they said that I would be under the intensive treatment service at home from now on, they would contact me for an assessment, and they would see me daily, after a week I still had not heard from the intensive treatment service, I went back to the hospital who told me that I wouldn’t be seen by anyone as I hadn’t engaged with the intensive treatment service, they sent me away and I felt so suicidal I took an overdose in the hospital car park. I woke up 2 days later in an intensive care unit who told me to contact my community mental health team as I had just turned 18 aswell, they’ve not helped me in any way they’re supposed to come see me weekly but they don’t and after everything that has happened I am so much worse than I was before I was in hospital, I feel like I’m never going to get better and feel so suicidal and I constantly have flashbacks to what happened in hospital and can’t make it stop... I went to my doctor today to see if there is anymore help I can get and told her that I was feeling so suicidal and I was scared I was going to hurt myself, I don’t want to die but I can’t live like this anymore, how bad does it have to be to properly get help",7.716298701298702,6.067869850649352,8.103463203463203,74.36805194805197,63.6969696969697,11.603463203463203,36.36796536796537,10.537671172512404,3.6381264069264065,1829,71,359,37,22,607,197,462,0.14800000000000002,0.759,0.09300000000000001,-0.9882,1,0,0,0,0,4,23.0,0,0,8,7,14,16,2,1,23,0,40,6,1,3,1,44,89,28,7,7,7,0,4,2,1,6,5,2,3,1,13,18,0,2,7,2,1,12,12,7,0,1,36,12,67,9,62,43,2,61,0,2,6,0,36,22,1,1,27,244,80,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350557270948416,0.07376005757197635,0.0,0.0,0.1395213631794177,0.04918498687942712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576057528254124,0.0,0.06608892677330717,0.054088903421882994,0.11746580085266813,0.042880026420024746,0.0,0.11971226963523784,0.0,0.0,0.12442413448706625,0.0,0.0,0.08859369174286798,0.0,0.14365475041602324,0.0,0.07171868505238796,0.0,0.0,0.06059368161753846,0.0,0.07601506019990069,0.0,0.056162620077882086,0.0,0.0,0.09072995645453777,0.0,0.0,0.07139597584046799,0.07300422431366121,0.0,0.0,0.0719983469286191,0.06155703975614948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321914305302623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670157421916687,0.05025256868402117,0.06753965998981315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054346303260755215,0.0,0.22050575892436686,0.0,0.11993148740011585,0.0,0.05625918056412425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12440696555649408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243117958644596,0.0,0.0,0.2357448774454317,0.0,0.14111816807308208,0.0,0.06927301750175548,0.0,0.07530291024406296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448236206045461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873141051827933,0.0,0.0621135588001854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046954045957885035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21266554677632754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747627557842192,0.05170970014743747,0.0,0.05425233496861597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13429941094183212,0.09753301789755592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13518927751476148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691165617491587,0.0,0.0704249353480193,0.0,0.22421489260414867,0.0,0.0,0.07946680138541201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05617546898174574,0.05880933066944899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4616584975735286,0.07982363308122868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061482289637061274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911097393168808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667629606840837,0.2016453085409699,0.15630581529690632,0.0,0.07651224671330539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05803978225386777,0.04148972385072237,0.11166892161418628,0.11284873498315952,0.0,0.0,0.13041607390774793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168483533421162,0.14990750136695666,0.0,0.0,0.09059629783406636
mentalhealth,Salutethecat,2020/03/03,"Malpractice I need to get this into the world so that hopefully something can be learned&none of you leave your loved ones alone with any police or medical professionals while seeking wellness checks. The issue began with four cuts on my leg and a panic attack, and what they themselves documented as ""non-violent behavior"" from someone who is 5'2 and 20 years old. I agreed to go to the hospital voluntarily so they wouldn't admit me involuntary and so they wouldn't grab me. Upon getting ready to roll me down into the ambulance,  I tried to look back at the apartment door and the people behind me, only for them to respond with injecting me with ketamine causing an even worse panic attack than I was having before. Within minutes I was hallucinating and out of control of my facilities, and ended up going unconscious from a severe allergic reaction. I woke up strapped to a bed vomiting all over myself connected to an EKG, an oxygen monitor, with an IV in my arm. My few glimpses of consciousness granted me with experiences of people dropping pills in my mouth for illnesses I dont have despite having a full list of my mental history and knowing I only suffer from generalized anxiety and chronic depressive disorder. I was unable to give any kind of consent or communicate what was happening despite them treating me for what they told me was a severe allergic reaction to ketamine. When I finally was regaining consciousness,  all I can remember was begging them repeatedly to stop drugging me so I could be lucid. I woke up with bruises on my arms from injection sites despite the initial injection of ketamine being on the other arm& me having been unconscious,  strapped down, and had made no attempts to fight back. Do not leave your family alone. A 20 minute panic attack turned into lifelong trauma and a medical emergency that could have killed me.",11.140810810810812,9.67008073873874,10.750282282282276,57.52902702702707,56.92792792792793,14.045165165165164,45.02282282282282,12.801484090802019,6.1156087687687695,1518,76,222,43,15,499,189,333,0.2,0.7509999999999999,0.049,-0.9936,0,4,2,0,1,0,28.0,0,3,7,2,9,17,6,3,19,0,26,15,4,3,2,43,44,20,1,6,3,0,1,0,0,2,10,0,2,0,8,22,0,2,5,0,1,2,5,12,1,2,14,2,42,5,55,23,4,36,0,2,1,1,17,22,0,3,11,181,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21506984443340774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249960828732021,0.0,0.14121376169515526,0.0,0.07942845128119615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3543594247216642,0.0,0.15967528035234116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835033161297268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066603803685738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645239319526512,0.1657970773840778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942725944316005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899635586131167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168612603777512,0.0,0.12040799502357327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196115546473656,0.0,0.0,0.06857768714908377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015641104196828,0.09788018670147336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373895067153215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849212021958288,0.09960167410404744,0.1180161589665304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181512217060624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10312504096335656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836988705816168,0.0,0.0,0.11487075484132388,0.10812131394905077,0.057061380097458925,0.0,0.0,0.2198785941460973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718971654682467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370919590641986,0.09824495426162114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091924043433029,0.10463461897761364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698745217605013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895045297577016,0.0,0.0703568193303237,0.15793237260758095,0.0,0.36546081254650825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14396309585841466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176173510891942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345931048176117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08797347687514485,0.07993218444876644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680520187971387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921249749964826,0.0,0.07049267653123906,0.1129354975922085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933542120222638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581002252645752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686209342564603
mentalhealth,minilio,2020/03/03,"I accidentally killed one of my cats cats, it's the second in one week and I can't handle it I'm crying so much, I tried this time to take them away from my car, I took all of them, looked more since last week there was one under the wheel and I didn't notice him (my garage is very narrow). As I placed my car in front of my house in order to go to work, I saw my little kitty shaking and having spasms in its own pool of blood with his little corpse... Busted. My God, I feel so bad. My head hurts, the image won't go away. I loved themso much, they were the good part about me, and just killed them, I hate myself so much for destroying everything in my fucking life.",2.073418693982074,3.1906279295774667,3.322010243277848,94.23790653008965,76.04225352112675,6.008706786171576,16.430217669654287,6.1124844417494595,-0.6605436619718312,514,5,122,3,11,167,91,142,0.218,0.7490000000000001,0.033,-0.9827,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,4,1,6,10,5,1,4,0,7,5,2,0,1,8,18,8,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,1,0,7,3,8,0,4,5,3,27,2,20,12,7,24,0,1,2,2,7,12,1,0,4,82,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27987539431622543,0.0,0.12436193526443368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16360788048756186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386117352904153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531051119749971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13769623567191394,0.0,0.0,0.16929650177844846,0.12492707688052684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470512654827651,0.1528594119070686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17186126322379816,0.1594475256801164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32956871536212545,0.0,0.0,0.12140915792912528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10520348149579756,0.0,0.2985618339058271,0.0,0.0,0.12507536367641092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442768507596847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284727130245158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695736175552719,0.0,0.0,0.3027847243933812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16129172942431014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561467460117664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12320793337764566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119872766427768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685038597356677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16548215346345094,0.1011231312919026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289431632055114,0.0,0.0,0.23894762514327414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843293324868956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,psychobitchsenior,2020/03/03,"i can feel myself slipping into a void [again]. I think the trigger could be the fact that my ex was back in town? Maybe I'm just shifting the blame. I want to hibernate for a week, even though I got back from a vacation 6 weeks ago. I just don't know what I'm supposed to be. I try to live in the moment and keep myself busy, but this feeling is creeping in. I feel like I'm not allowing myself to feel it because it's busy season at work. I can't let my work suffer and it's going alright for me. I am just so fucking exhausted.",1.7510628019323669,2.8466167826086988,3.7585507246376832,90.87425120772949,76.82608695652175,6.502415458937199,24.082125603864736,6.937597516519254,0.7277922705314008,410,13,94,4,9,140,75,115,0.098,0.8190000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.5747,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,9,5,1,0,7,1,10,2,0,2,1,20,24,5,0,2,5,1,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,4,15,2,12,18,0,15,0,1,0,1,1,6,1,0,9,63,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18873968810967856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3274428614473437,0.0,0.1297933370953687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999835327814766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406308732446668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43063261375129336,0.1521092483298326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19684001916945895,0.0,0.0,0.1210066727415604,0.0,0.17029063173008135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18925203121360887,0.0,0.0,0.11701461576279933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21772392025592707,0.0,0.10402138103946217,0.0,0.1880112198760351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21390557401949592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642978326923802,0.2091916606729472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455790316157413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12558503721526995,0.0,0.34158127042606184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100148752087675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BIGmunchie1379,2020/03/03,"How to get your shit together without leaving the house lol -go to bed at a reasonable time like before 12
-wake up as early as 5 if needed but if i can get away with it stay in bed till about 7 or 8
-eat 3 meals
-eat snacks
-stay hydrated
-exercise at least once a day. AT LEAST lol
-shower at least once a day for sure. 
-brush your teeth twice A day
-don’t pig out on a lot of sugar
-eat iron for energy(beans)
-do laundry once a week 
-minimize habits but if quitting altogether fucks up your mental health take it in moderation
-shave my face and trim the beard
-MUSIC REALLY LOUD
-learn how to cook something every now and then
-clean up after yourself 
-go the extra mile 

If y’all got more ways to master the basics of survival, throw them at me. I know this list may seem like some really simple stuff but when I was super down some of these things were fucken mountains to overcome.",1.5170454545454533,4.153822977272732,2.481136363636363,91.52295454545455,86.27272727272728,5.4727272727272736,18.227272727272727,6.980632752743323,0.2687931818181819,708,18,141,10,22,223,126,176,0.035,0.841,0.12300000000000001,0.9432,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,4,1,4,5,6,2,0,10,2,6,14,4,3,1,25,16,17,0,5,9,0,0,2,0,1,2,1,4,0,6,4,7,0,4,2,0,3,2,2,0,1,3,3,10,4,31,12,8,32,0,0,0,1,5,15,2,10,13,87,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286985442407909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656109110882733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650250325924238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42049854091521455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154127462376577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266371066431746,0.14313426648924782,0.0,0.1556993845577345,0.0,0.10955654740193124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560483373569333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805815614712593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528140079282661,0.0,0.0,0.14504353507927814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13384439586468544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164566966365034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804504333061546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101569980140419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4376421945193569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14569659135552596,0.0,0.0,0.1755075982475709,0.14083970413225375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470273138333066,0.0,0.0,0.14060944931917538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054549820466347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920079150997569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15681094241425927,0.0,0.0,0.12910335821135074,0.0,0.10299297308809936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910043623785893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987496199054643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087294676306452,0.10987822484668767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204519145072935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GingerStag810,2020/03/03,How much does creative writing help mental health? So I used to write a bit when I was in college and found it helped me in feeling better but i haven't written in about 4/5 years. I've been becoming more and more depressed lately and despite joining the gym (as I heard that exercise can help) I haven't been feeling happier at all. So my question is would it be worth starting to write again?,4.0307692307692315,5.593420794871792,4.305641025641027,87.34769230769234,71.8205128205128,6.7384615384615385,30.948717948717945,7.1686216300943375,1.8134717948717944,314,14,61,3,6,98,59,78,0.11,0.7490000000000001,0.141,-0.4954,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,2,0,9,2,0,2,1,15,16,9,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,6,3,7,1,8,8,5,9,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,1,5,42,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578250414456791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20646583832144452,0.25486481925785154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010684722046153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20429197068935248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360767071672165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559637485563228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481443715051308,0.0,0.0,0.469425941702493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633395802255525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352607371459597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17161118514995166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615152545603486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652357385840859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20162417017770426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16583480403806009,0.0,0.0,0.15033289689528964
mentalhealth,FunzigVentje,2020/03/03,"Innovations around BURNOUT Hi everyone,

Does anyone know creative (and preferably effective) ways businesses have been trying to relieve stress / prevent burnout for their employees?

For instance I know of businesses which let their employees bring their pets to work to relieve stress and businesses who have made relaxing spaces in their office.

Any ideas are very welcome!",9.54413793103448,13.075358241379314,6.837448275862073,66.70237931034484,61.41379310344828,10.846896551724136,42.634482758620685,10.793553405168565,5.949864827586207,310,18,38,9,5,88,43,58,0.08,0.696,0.22399999999999998,0.8475,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,4,4,1,6,0,2,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,10,9,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,5,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,5,4,8,6,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,0,22,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17330772669998096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17819806094426086,0.0,0.0,0.22687182407120154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22302222320207268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435214839614528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876962688674302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801193863357984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26060287655152825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411466060876036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5838629548006565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17302740713046633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21027913823826608,0.0,0.20228922036886826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855348924413107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Art3rra,2020/03/03,"I struggle to read people's emotions and reactions I can never connect with people very well and have been an outcast for most of my life because I say the wrong things and am generally awkward to be around. I embarrass myself constantly and can't seem to express myself well. 
Anyone else or am I just a bit socially broken lol",8.881904761904764,7.522984492063492,9.082539682539686,67.34857142857145,61.22222222222222,11.574603174603176,40.04761904761904,10.504223727775694,4.358580952380953,265,12,44,5,3,88,50,63,0.184,0.703,0.113,-0.5739,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,3,3,1,7,1,0,0,1,12,8,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,1,8,2,7,6,2,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,3,2,36,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15562553902763046,0.22804841721874355,0.0,0.19813374917870905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13567610054454715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429878893122311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24051820419973466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859279825281219,0.2503603598582329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15720718729979435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17165906526916133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30860287755098537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226294009114294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17699593768020325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20261861373977494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268812405618017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326776219889239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786506714709147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836428750188919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40023282758393786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433444484840714,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,redwinekidd,2020/03/03,"I’m struggling Currently I am being told I have to relocated where I live, this time has been very stressful and I feel as though the added stress of moving will only further my trauma and I just have no clue how to cope. I’m overwhelmed and want nothing more than the comfort of my usual space. I want to talk to a psychologist but would need a new one but with this situation I also feel like it’s too much to load on a new psychologist. 
I don’t know what to do.",4.47364261168385,4.615501536082476,5.677886597938143,83.14954467353954,69.7216494845361,8.52852233676976,27.50687285223368,8.344100000000001,1.5994068728522333,367,11,80,5,6,123,67,97,0.106,0.799,0.095,-0.2651,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,4,5,0,10,0,0,1,0,15,19,9,0,4,3,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,2,2,10,2,12,14,2,10,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,6,56,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786457648063754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19962763343790146,0.14102605468539645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848853559365523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964420318422186,0.0,0.17431208731116735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098101004936044,0.14511526856689302,0.14637318500535518,0.0,0.3813096425237713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18941526472201345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337666261337781,0.1501352736103116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22189130723750053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4522531466477997,0.20637039636293514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15866653006864884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939492496460252,0.0,0.11510834768870255,0.0,0.0,0.18862878093629112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174135383311197,0.16287966407307425,0.23286897437799856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023073207433034,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lanky_Fella,2020/03/03,"Down day feeling shame, anxiety and rumination I’m not so much looking for help and advice on here as I don’t think reddit is the best place for that lol. I would love to know that people care though and validation that my experience is valid and isn’t my fault. I sometimes struggle with that.",4.9848275862068965,6.083604896551733,5.527068965517246,81.26232758620691,69.0,8.558620689655173,28.29310344827586,8.841846274778883,2.0230206896551732,236,8,47,4,4,76,44,58,0.139,0.597,0.264,0.8689,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,2,1,1,5,1,0,0,0,10,12,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,2,5,3,7,11,2,4,0,0,1,1,2,3,0,0,1,32,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645437865003897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20709953895272526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28410322448290337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760163894289137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17459156547091662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648154421089604,0.0,0.0,0.1368838224926671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18145745380389747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878025845365556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22733604655515896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24433475605792898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19900984970265054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187682689877292,0.0,0.2828440699267064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677483299413736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830146129270501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734660092096504,0.26598035756799154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923112377450541,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VeryButtery,2020/03/03,"The invasive thoughts are starting to seem like a voice of reason. A few short months ago, my life seemed like it was going to be perfect. I was happy, and emotionally supported. I had very few invasive thoughts, and when I did, it was the easiest thing in the world to ignore them and look forward to the future. You could even go as far as to say I was depression free.

Obviously, things have gone downhill, and there doesn’t really seem to be an end in sight for my situation at the moment. Every day I am progressively having more severe and an increase in volume of these thoughts.

What if I really am useless? What do I have left to live for? Does anybody care about me anymore? I should just kill myself. I don’t think I can handle this anymore.

Those and many variations are among the most common to pass my mind. I’m not even putting an effort to fight them at this point. My mind is starting to align with this way of thinking, leading to brainstorming of suicide methods, or idealizing a painless end to existence. I’ve never felt this one before, but I am definitely sympathizing with anyone who as ever felt like going to sleep and never coming back. 

Safe to say, I’ve come at least full circle from last year at exactly this time. I’m at an all time low, but this time with not nearly as much hope left to save me. I have no motivation whatsoever, and I’m honestly over it already. To this very day, I am only held here by the smallest sliver of hope that things will be better soon, that I will be happy again. 

Thank you for reading. I would love to tell my story to anyone willing to listen, but just the fact that you were able to make it through this post is very meaningful to me.",4.719851155503328,5.763320165165164,5.470936153544852,81.62605170387779,69.57057057057057,8.433946990468732,27.69147408277843,8.716276077567194,1.965104556730643,1337,44,262,22,23,435,185,333,0.065,0.748,0.187,0.9926,0,0,1,0,1,2,37.0,0,3,2,7,12,24,2,0,15,0,33,3,1,4,8,58,64,18,2,7,9,0,2,3,0,5,1,4,0,0,23,13,0,3,13,1,1,11,7,6,0,1,14,8,29,19,51,40,9,55,0,3,2,1,12,20,0,8,27,189,52,3,0.09473097065989304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397328975029525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453798175800308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878953358469145,0.13247619458034904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284226904360758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060907876589482,0.0,0.0,0.08378184531800006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658453807599733,0.0,0.0,0.16320468634022006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563497174268621,0.0,0.0,0.12218727835592275,0.0,0.08159164621871481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828997108052184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10655959155231227,0.1678070447258219,0.0,0.0,0.12513782538359375,0.08568958641229571,0.07981492849422228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819131752669752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16151338110627833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20168575956539575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18817845723921992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480578347418973,0.0,0.0,0.07721838466204071,0.0,0.0,0.2058509536021062,0.0,0.06691128610471625,0.13884230165480538,0.0,0.08364918264452277,0.0,0.0795501567496896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549839956458212,0.0,0.0632336585135212,0.09604233563535254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913025512046833,0.0,0.07561335699454863,0.0,0.06963816332020559,0.0,0.1461247291040114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419215737593396,0.07204717192787455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955138702928782,0.0,0.0907260838332578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523079038285638,0.0,0.0,0.0947566062059156,0.0,0.12137417105972904,0.0973992152592538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15066774018299733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587185535269889,0.0,0.10701903274691296,0.0,0.0,0.10648158009380043,0.09479938423397603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410213722140493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10362030644321736,0.10749958289205508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279904379329554,0.08721555027633128,0.0,0.0,0.1888051427427019,0.1213995618598272,0.0,0.22561742745554936,0.16571517239420916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344889154727177,0.0,0.07519303514608862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729416359245959,0.0,0.0,0.06100363922809701
mentalhealth,C0nt3mplati0n,2020/03/03,"Near the end. My dog has been cuddling me hardcore and been more attentive towards me than normal. I have a plan and I'm days away.. Part of me wonders if she can tell my mental state has changed and I'm preparing for this. Ok just tired of holding on for no reason. Gonna say one last good bye to my friends and end it. I guess this is my confession of sorts. The guilt sometimes is overwhelming. But what I feel inside every day tears me apart, I cant do it anymore.",0.334862542955328,2.6641264639175297,1.7954896907216489,96.58711769759456,88.48453608247421,4.882817869415808,21.485395189003444,6.42735559955562,0.28210034364261194,365,13,81,4,12,117,72,97,0.092,0.8220000000000001,0.086,0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,2,3,1,10,2,0,1,0,16,16,6,0,2,3,0,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,5,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,2,13,3,11,13,2,11,1,1,0,1,6,5,0,4,6,53,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140466864405261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027806418153434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283209317951985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27838670863634385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3823249972974693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18184720653837724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091308068248088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16675075226003336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18102908183007316,0.0,0.0,0.2377625460211779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759313427840064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175072193018386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21146888072617634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462528968040169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23372430071657915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22191055668498816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17163773860745504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134627068444302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18864609794080686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480663668800591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340598735772285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fallenul,2020/03/03,"Wanting To Be In A Dream/Fictional World Everyone here will probably think I'm some weirdo but, I've just rewatched ""Puella Magi Madoka Magica"" earlier and everytime the show ends, I breakdown crying because of how much I don't want it to end but where I'm going with this, is that after it ends I start wanting to just be in a world with the characters . I get so attached to the characters I can't stand to turn it off or anything . I get to the point I just hope that when I sleep I get to be with them and I want to stay in the dream forever just so I can be with them . I would always say to myself ""If it meant leaving this life behind for a another life, I would gladly take it"" . I just really need someone else's insight on what's going on with me .",3.3397928653624827,4.095727708860764,5.0232105868814765,84.63185845799774,72.54430379746836,8.530264672036825,26.38895281933257,8.841846274778883,1.8257139240506324,590,19,126,11,11,201,90,158,0.06,0.8740000000000001,0.066,0.4086,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,2,0,11,2,0,0,8,0,11,3,1,1,0,29,29,10,0,9,9,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,10,7,0,0,3,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,18,2,24,21,2,20,0,0,0,0,3,10,0,4,6,90,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523114469675554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704182623953154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13374158152696694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907177183037054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17852254968840073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576609725645247,0.0,0.4318381881936853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552965305474277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547327748990804,0.0,0.1847297517744763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16142080360619296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720871043119135,0.0,0.0,0.2295878865584851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947221217269124,0.12050784447462365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363561876735438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17522597254619068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411561725469168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12924384679671816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263915656368047,0.0,0.13770418125955142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11503375611199095,0.17322659889049896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219615644032925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413739766152562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17677703307266845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3834382389955138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309016265616924,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arcpat,2020/03/03,I'm such a crybaby I just had my second psychotherapy and all I did was cry for the first and second. I feel weak and it ruins my mood for the next few hours. I've practiced how to talk without crying but I always end up bawling. How do I deal with these tears?,0.3945238095238111,2.448587500000002,2.5892857142857157,93.12238095238096,84.71428571428572,5.161904761904762,18.261904761904766,6.42735559955562,-0.15143095238095186,204,5,46,2,6,69,43,56,0.156,0.81,0.033,-0.6729,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,2,1,11,6,6,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,3,1,7,0,6,3,2,5,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,35,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399867363073737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6336268786759464,0.0,0.2973461147236295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25545258732097964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14583271905777612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453280558713581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840334617425889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3067356304976153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318193238569977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27802449251913675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Datmode,2020/03/03,"[M16] I want to have fun Everyday I attend school and when I get home I can barely function, my 2 closest friend I continuously question why I am with them. I feel like cry ing but no tears come out. I obsess about death and pain, I can't have fun in my life for some reason. Video games, a media that once gave me joy now I barely play them. I get juelous of every small detail in a perosn. I hate people because I don't know how to communicate with them. I have a low humming anxiety most of the time and I can't shake it. I hate the fact that my family and I can't do fun stuff because we don't have any money to. I obsess and obsess and it never stops. When I am not at school I am at home it makes me depressed. I don't have a destist so my tooth has been hurting me since 9th grade and I can't do anything about it. My parents got divorce 10 years ago, since then my father has started a new life with 3 new children. My mom is having trouble finding a job and if she can't it will be bad news. I can never find joy in life because I obsess if I will be able to do it later in life. I sleep 10-15 hours on summer break while I watch my peers have the time of their lives. I cannot take it anymore what should I do ?",0.974010747435269,2.3730999363295915,2.9913238886174907,94.29262335124572,79.59925093632957,5.39254193128155,20.222927861911746,5.7926816847441245,-0.19777140530858173,941,23,224,5,23,318,142,267,0.20600000000000002,0.679,0.115,-0.9809,2,0,0,0,1,1,23.0,1,0,4,0,7,21,2,5,9,0,34,7,2,3,3,35,47,17,1,4,4,3,1,1,1,3,5,0,2,1,11,14,0,1,6,3,1,3,13,13,0,0,3,2,46,8,21,39,2,35,0,3,1,0,15,11,0,5,21,145,57,4,0.12157592810185568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077697247905484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267580012547827,0.0,0.09300525222997094,0.0,0.1205706522506369,0.0,0.0,0.10004662988740873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151082173514013,0.2223346720317718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472689699138203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354544825410675,0.0,0.0,0.10471316872717576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024329629525964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146109650339148,0.0,0.06147244219620965,0.08685386732798478,0.0,0.0,0.22223639150290306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939292604693646,0.0,0.12703680914367035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723537587544842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400621181168897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439011371628647,0.0,0.11972779957454685,0.0,0.13014954552618976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064534916763955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668149505995818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34349069378273644,0.05939585743323447,0.0,0.10735377188819546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115287606054206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238825762136798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875337013407573,0.2348375778966636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947439561941887,0.0,0.0,0.1293653592406438,0.0,0.1349956806160373,0.0,0.0,0.08428544070888312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619286343231848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500030253093972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460826597362126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20113772811366126,0.0,0.12166372878315307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605206765836128,0.0,0.0,0.1016429197028498,0.0,0.0,0.13917535089066724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091409967621659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417838027278145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170863231815623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970336518597848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829091167421844
mentalhealth,Lyphinx,2020/03/03,"Degrading emotional state Hi! I’ve been as of recently noticing a change in my behavior. It feels like I’m not feeling emotions as strong as I once was, and I’m finding it harder to even feel emotions at all.

For context, I recently got out of a mental health hospital Kahi Mohala, my main issue was bringing down my issues and dealing with others issues first. I always put people before myself. But I’ve noticed afterwards that I’m starting to care less about people as time goes and I’m not sure what’s happening to me. Any thoughts? Feel free to pm me if you want to go really into this. I appreciate the help.",3.104628099173553,5.271816322314052,4.888429752066116,79.60719008264465,75.85950413223141,8.036363636363637,27.52892561983471,8.841846274778883,2.4889107438016524,489,20,88,11,11,166,86,121,0.057,0.7709999999999999,0.172,0.9262,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,2,2,6,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,2,19,19,9,0,2,4,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,6,0,1,3,2,1,0,1,5,4,11,6,19,14,3,15,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,7,54,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350905773935754,0.0,0.0,0.09276757235448306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607998656876235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908522531528308,0.0,0.14431006236325855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406389279010378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4603489884342397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010149546528214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27590415674664953,0.09745563283798807,0.0,0.0,0.12468177203761605,0.11603539798682914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775283685846419,0.0,0.10910435403408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063223707027178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500385148767847,0.0,0.0,0.0914367835173518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4271486525690396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664597734320704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137475264029066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106210887041451,0.0,0.14527861049361598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891473855112104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371357797138308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739159634441213,0.0,0.2693887272652807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655596196993832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857048561053472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829908305481324,0.07954527901927695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08046170375030401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,awuxstudent,2020/03/03,"Student Wellness Survey Hi,

I am working on a school project on student health and wellness. If you have some time to spare, please help me out by taking this survey.

This survey will take a few minutes to complete and contains 10 questions. Thank you so much for your time. I truly appreciate it! 

[https://forms.gle/o5NnbGZfasdf8AQE7](https://forms.gle/o5NnbGZfasdf8AQE7)",9.14166666666667,13.36831078571429,6.382142857142861,65.92952380952383,66.14285714285714,5.161904761904762,30.76190476190476,6.42735559955562,1.8201761904761908,308,12,40,2,6,87,44,56,0.0,0.701,0.299,0.9531,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,3,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,7,6,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,3,7,5,3,5,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,3,2,30,9,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712998123849707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750445846030114,0.0,0.0,0.17343809755358486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902147803978015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28403541077149186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28986494483681896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618739880786155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3891032841872093,0.0,0.0,0.2382269427010039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30176437384970795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4653038426700379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883768036243201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Needmorecoffeeshots,2020/03/03,"I'm worried my close friend may be suffering a mental breakdown I'm not sure how to handle this situation (Texas) Hello everyone, I'm not really sure if this is the most appropriate sub to pose this question in but I wasn't sure where else to go. I have a friend whom I have had as one of my closest if not my closest friend for nearly 5 years now. He's been there through my ups and downs and he's always been a good friend but something has changed within the past few weeks. He lives many states away at his university but me and him play games and stay in daily close contact and within the past few weeks he's cut himself for the first time on his bicep, began drinking in extreme excess almost daily and acting in a very erratic way. The issue is his self harming doesn't seem to be coming from a suicidal standpoint he has repeatedly stated that he enjoys the pain and he is talking about how many people he's wronged and that he needs to suffer for what he's done. (He grew up in wealth and has to my knowledge not really done anything terrible in his life) I a week and a half ago thought that I managed to bring him back to reality, got him to tell me he wasn't going to cut himself anymore and that I'm always gonna be here if he needs someone to talk to it seemed all ok. He promised to stop self harming but 2 days ago he called me drunk as all hell crying and talking to me about how everyone in the world is sheep and how he's fucked over so many good people in his life and how he needs me to cut him. He has since then over the past few days reiterated over and over again how I'm the only person in the world that he trusts and that I need to make him suffer. He's been drinking and driving and just the way that he talks he sounds like he's having a severe mental break. But during the day he acts normal, no tears just talks about everything very passively and goes about a normal day to day routine. I don't understand it, I've witnessed someone go through a psychosis but this seems different to that. I don't know how to handle this situation. I've told him I would do the whole cut thing on his back for him because I'm afraid if I didn't agree he would hurt himself further. He's seeming extremely detached from reality and I don't think his family is aware. I don't have any way of contacting his family, he has no social media and I'm not sure how to track down his parents. He lives in a different state, I don't have his address, I don't have much. I have an audio recording I took during a video chat session with him where he's literally in tears crying to me about how he needs me to cut him and to make him suffer so he will finally be even. I don't know what to do and I don't know how to handle this situation. I know this is a shit ton of information to unpack but I need any kind of recommendations that I can here. If there are any resources specifically in the Texas/Lubbock area that someone could point me in so I can try to get my friend help please do. I'm very much so worried and trying to figure out how to handle this situation without losing my friend.",5.0354718834411045,4.927589651632975,5.873907260374888,83.0878143161169,68.50233281493001,8.759089792911517,28.58512728165671,8.371475516178862,1.76519533437014,2458,75,524,32,38,810,255,643,0.18,0.727,0.09300000000000001,-0.996,3,0,3,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,2,33,40,8,1,28,1,51,9,2,13,6,98,90,54,1,16,20,1,0,1,6,5,3,2,1,3,24,29,3,1,15,7,1,10,20,20,0,3,14,2,60,20,79,66,10,83,1,6,0,1,82,40,3,13,26,327,84,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586340968020172,0.0,0.059793642606191286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937149817029757,0.0,0.0,0.12182004894694105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05921895216595069,0.0,0.0,0.04913846345751798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05610204636912334,0.09183075943230858,0.0,0.03640030710102391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06097334199894799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063168117962069,0.05143720289850498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04767573131620891,0.0,0.13118319200431489,0.1925487548595239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247741225915282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221364584666206,0.0,0.11699142439281485,0.0,0.0,0.049882297881013546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039439674551473534,0.0,0.0,0.11411608572679274,0.053665923599316406,0.0,0.11258363671995472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541234306370541,0.0,0.05079159129844437,0.0,0.0,0.276803298923302,0.055203428064069734,0.031197420697184137,0.0,0.10180830883089452,0.10016835780842397,0.047757700280467705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040024163476259374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06392367932881393,0.0,0.0,0.06232454395060395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218158721156624,0.13126615107968256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08435369049130127,0.029172608545590405,0.0,0.10545481447783818,0.0,0.0,0.06680323630791679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971738057066335,0.18161791364092086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035271210949998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877914088499528,0.26565725832395193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170115337037944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04046287024571756,0.04541419837653613,0.06353852183595735,0.0,0.06630388576146101,0.0,0.17100758359676674,0.0827945339675154,0.05213882557480391,0.0,0.06554661215799122,0.05644780144199641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689188881699626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650696807103358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174407942123885,0.12458673590716685,0.06745835337018899,0.06129422746913269,0.04939496169918076,0.2684783023360253,0.0,0.060869576872894425,0.15178312836248742,0.04596975301885522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06364579214830487,0.0,0.04992249015438857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.065316000985586,0.0,0.2251140486944868,0.0,0.0,0.2399740280541025,0.052191530903955036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039670463936280695,0.03826148645116852,0.0,0.047405213063867996,0.03481895500652682,0.0,0.0,0.05705804286339637,0.06634300574761663,0.08108200600613312,0.0,0.0,0.06216302558117945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780769098109095,0.0,0.14219148329972744,0.14369377606414366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666709601377757,0.0,0.057560911021094716,0.0,0.0,0.12128228879526505,0.0,0.08483637631274316,0.0652864625427613,0.0,0.03845302042346479
mentalhealth,dumbdumbbitchbaby,2020/03/03,"help! ive been struggling a lot recently and because of this going to school has been really difficult for me, im in therapy but i still cant do it. does anyone have any tips for getting into school??",0.8207317073170728,3.2499291219512223,3.4372682926829263,85.02419512195122,87.04878048780488,7.182439024390242,22.83414634146341,8.238735603445708,1.809454634146341,158,6,31,4,5,55,36,41,0.113,0.84,0.047,-0.3815,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,9,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,6,7,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,22,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18477875814977707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18999277777718626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16563784698511905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23778379780158945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196236260944115,0.0,0.15442460446962455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821280311506371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935039739937213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310064277648133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17407063950689555,0.0,0.2682904878302662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5499898180512283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21699575565490828,0.0,0.0,0.2840604954975741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107352323640757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moomerfoo,2020/03/03,"Declining mental health? I started 20mg of fluoxetine about 10 years ago for anxiety. I went up to 40mg within the past year because I felt that I was disassociating and just feeling a bit off overall with my mental health. I have days where I feel really depressed and don’t want to do anything and feel like there isn’t a point of being in school or doing anything except for being there for my family and boyfriend.
I’ve cut off friendships accidentally because I just always want to be alone or with my boyfriend and never have the energy to talk to people. I’m about to graduate college and continue on more schooling and I do feel motivated sometimes but part of me just doesn’t think any of it is worth it. (I am not suicidal I just feel hopeless sometimes)
Side note: I also take 40?mg of atomexetine for add because I was having a really hard time concentrating.
I guess what I’m asking is if taking fluoxetine for that long a time period (over 10 years) will cause it to stop working? Should I try a different antidepressant? I go to a psychiatrist but I honestly don’t feel like he is all that helpful (part of it is that I also just don’t know how to properly express how I am feeling and don’t think he will understand how I’m feeling with my mental health)",5.083221176470588,6.106494828000003,6.3820941176470605,75.4989294117647,68.72,9.56235294117647,30.70588235294117,9.773937934552695,2.9409435294117636,1017,40,191,23,17,344,129,250,0.077,0.7929999999999999,0.13,0.9202,1,1,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,2,15,6,1,0,8,0,26,3,0,5,2,49,51,18,1,4,12,0,10,2,0,3,3,0,0,0,9,12,0,1,14,0,1,2,8,3,0,0,4,10,23,3,33,41,5,26,0,2,0,0,6,10,0,4,16,131,32,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069968244157778,0.0,0.0,0.10597169924748742,0.0,0.16364904746506576,0.08513766328721789,0.0,0.0,0.06958047662790247,0.0,0.07827380889254178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839975378565428,0.0,0.0956545188822876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18711826710355128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170592460712628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051098705150258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598733584356148,0.0,0.08812726551417469,0.0,0.0,0.10690165119530028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645731352754204,0.0,0.41388477121496337,0.14619352885574088,0.09824235347761708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058150285723655624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11271599173805845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165778967739832,0.0,0.0,0.3262811619400971,0.0,0.0,0.06858231617992985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05623188528605445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997585904593606,0.0,0.0,0.09054915762185907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30934067216302075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891477496002716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216031649173784,0.09767513046092643,0.0709351603300613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672459409309583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109643321659262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071047238529349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20239235408353395,0.0,0.07242196475144973,0.0,0.0,0.08554332450417268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119204560979552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15386241453975585,0.08224019311104394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311238578597463,0.0,0.0,0.11932614570339806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06946793248675913,0.0,0.0,0.10651776089307438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070087758351665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09485080346821756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448950195695134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976703802681324
mentalhealth,Rakahrian,2020/03/03,"Losing grip of progress in anexiety therapy and falling off. so basically whats been happening to me for the last months of therapy it that i often loose progress because i run out of power to keep up with myself. I also want to say that I dont know how strong my anexiety is because I do loose all train of thought in an attack and feel like I want to cry, but I dont, which im not sure about is either it not being that strong or just me being used to this feeling. I get constantly scared of anything that includes doing something I either have not done before or had any problems with before. I also cant leave my bubble for more then some hours at a time otherwise i shut down and get an anexiety attack. I honestly dont know where to go since im a 16yo student that really cant continue with school after this summer break ( i just suck, missed to much school and am not very bright when it comes to maths and stuff, theres luckily no monitary reason or something). as I said at the start I sometimes loose progress because I get an attack seemingly randomly and I just cant function after those and therefore it reinforces my anexiety and causes me to fall back. I cant really dodge situations that scare me tho cuz everything scares me, and i felt i can deal with some triggers. This is where the running out of energy part comes in. It takes a lot off of me to control a single Trigger but as i said, normally i can cope. I just run out of juice sometimes and then everything thats just the smallest trigger just completely shuts me down, and I feel like that alone is getting to me. I dealt with a depressive phase in 6-7 grade, and i feel like thats showing its ugly mug again. I get rather randomly sad and just dont really find enjoyment in much but drowning out the real world with shows and video games. Its escapeism and not good for me but sometimes I feel so cornered for days at a time that I feel like i need to run somewhere. All in all I feel like not being able to keep up even with the slightest bit of life and it makes me pretty sad most of the time, not uncommonly ending in me just crying at home because I was to scared to walk though my entrance today and leave for school. Its not fun and I really dont know what im suppost to do anymore since I feel like my fear is completely irrational and other then trying to make it shut up I cant touch it. I cant argue with it and it overwrites my thoughts. I just feel stuck. 

sorry for this wall of text bois",4.5181686429512515,5.091779249011861,5.361541501976287,83.93332674571806,69.75098814229248,8.662977602108038,28.57444005270092,8.754623652393294,2.012527799736496,1964,67,405,32,33,642,220,506,0.2,0.7090000000000001,0.091,-0.9962,1,1,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,8,26,30,5,5,16,0,30,1,0,12,4,109,70,41,1,6,27,0,12,6,0,0,1,3,1,0,33,34,0,3,18,4,0,10,20,16,0,0,10,16,55,14,69,57,15,62,0,5,1,0,6,30,1,11,27,282,88,6,0.06247747446357421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06470782132382713,0.0,0.099926427512061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04248682507911936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061960866469673075,0.0,0.0,0.05141363805769567,0.0,0.0,0.21323144023013785,0.0,0.0480413213581436,0.0,0.15234275415216994,0.0,0.10632745817014354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820922059020595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418157648649911,0.0,0.10763762423342037,0.13101288658272553,0.06751595436568987,0.07007380017838309,0.0,0.0,0.1372571439640965,0.040292802396502,0.0644115327952474,0.05381175720633633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393614809205375,0.3661156738167961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055336498077835854,0.0,0.0,0.04126578264409559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123014509541023,0.0,0.0,0.0703045285433589,0.28431439494162064,0.2678035214422025,0.0599881732613874,0.0,0.057103279784822686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163209508722773,0.0,0.03550738853161324,0.0524031413563475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05524862433311065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626700009888594,0.0,0.06152772721777401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024591808273176,0.0,0.0,0.11106569993954787,0.0,0.0,0.10300795811420074,0.05092748044524836,0.0,0.13230924884353418,0.0,0.0,0.04412968789205307,0.1831400289826137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989631280569616,0.0,0.053116114573301065,0.0,0.0,0.08340839869995167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04986892404694975,0.0,0.0918562649621491,0.046326255665535866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061214659750439576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676570164586103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356205258696959,0.0,0.05978250529440875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111304399942088,0.16009867987412574,0.0642372493572322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188607708251017,0.04968459535564036,0.2502034048863251,0.18969161901092207,0.0,0.05687714626180086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336402500135054,0.07022729900062187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619642443058454,0.18537545936808092,0.06993841755579837,0.044221877995114116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152176065598895,0.0,0.0,0.05888428029137964,0.0,0.04697528537897441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14289687402997542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061383801444997485,0.09920027184491714,0.10929335337075168,0.0,0.0592213404921275,0.0,0.0,0.042418104031633465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053960478107629516,0.0,0.051550459602896365,0.07370166634832466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frankegreenz,2020/03/03,"How much weight do you put in experience in choosing a psychotherapist? Hello, 

I just started researching potential therapists. I go in and out of funks like everyone else, but I wouldn’t consider myself depressed and I definitely don’t suffer from anxiety. I just want to work out some things in regards to some jaded perspectives, bad habits and indulgences, romance issues, etc. 

I was wondering how much weight do you put in a therapist’s experience. I’m using mywellbeing.com to help me “match” with a therapist. The one with the least amount of experience has specialties most closely related to what I’m looking for, while the other two generally have clients with slightly different focuses but have a decent amount more experience. 

This is my first post, I hope I’m not breaking any rules or etiquette. Thanks!",7.590209790209791,9.43240064335665,7.8107762237762275,64.53308741258743,63.54545454545455,12.153566433566434,38.076223776223785,11.792908689023552,5.379526433566433,664,34,102,23,10,216,97,143,0.124,0.728,0.14800000000000002,0.4199,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,0,2,4,7,0,0,7,0,9,2,0,3,0,27,20,9,0,3,6,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,9,2,0,2,0,0,3,3,3,0,3,1,3,12,4,18,18,10,16,0,2,1,0,4,8,0,6,4,73,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972159897912041,0.0,0.10093134787767044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11016177921396966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11363703669167588,0.0,0.0,0.1378459525369836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021632888819426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714449102310725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607133763062725,0.0,0.5162383199120466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222543806336664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07498276627393631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843450587815267,0.0,0.0,0.13104308615464175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770781871861335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445769249959035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079374544252743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19397756724128928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940384072522445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635905506570344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652660001957833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338559885782496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146974777624815,0.0,0.4595666410405391,0.08765299687632437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888315522450294,0.0,0.0,0.11395109821641425,0.0,0.0,0.07781978695611187,0.0,0.0,0.3213271383192129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307991236239204,0.09605161600827428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,miaverde,2020/03/03,"should i delete all socials ? idk why but i get this feeling that it’s just not good for me but then again what do i do when i am on my phone, and i don’t want to be forever anonymous like i am on here but i also feel so judged and paranoid when i post of socials and idk i don’t want to give in and delete but i also don’t want to keep up the posts of myself and tweets",-0.3915116279069792,1.0008139767441904,1.7745930232558145,101.48654069767444,83.65116279069767,4.765116279069769,17.726744186046513,5.148860815047168,-0.8755069767441865,286,6,77,1,8,96,52,86,0.10800000000000001,0.775,0.11699999999999999,-0.0688,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,1,0,9,0,0,0,1,19,17,15,0,4,6,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,13,2,10,15,1,10,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,5,57,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3741157445932363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365440125643585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12220840552544872,0.22438794182075414,0.0,0.1961927463601987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079100997913576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11427669005009987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4480425535201609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4768839069645637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41389882241618814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110675390940019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jayrocmer,2020/03/03,"Seeing a Therapist, but need some advice from you! Hello, I am a 25f who suffers from depression and anxiety, along with a few other \[un-diagnosed\] mental disorders. I have recently started taking weekly 90MG fluoxetine and seeing a therapist. My therapist would like me to think of things I want to work on to help myself.

Now while I understand this is all up to me, I'd like to have some examples of goals to work on personally. For example: I need to work on my social anxiety; I want to work on building strong interpersonal relationship skills; and I want to rephrase any and all negative thoughts when they occur. 

What are some goals you've made for yourself? Please let me know!",5.94902012248469,7.473785196850398,6.823569553805777,71.27442694663169,67.11023622047244,10.998775153105862,32.22134733158355,10.980518767755715,4.003117935258094,548,23,94,17,9,182,80,127,0.13,0.711,0.159,0.2579,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,1,8,2,5,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,1,2,23,21,7,0,6,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,15,3,22,17,6,11,0,2,2,0,8,5,0,3,8,68,20,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832825082876993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626388472957227,0.0,0.2165820437497441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192317931876545,0.14367777903041495,0.0,0.0,0.16223704186283236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09488293985879907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779624379768288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475203008103404,0.0,0.13831558847181866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339450325347046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426565623501733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20992603363679133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236024596555762,0.0,0.15538751392077707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977085273838127,0.15197966888452855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256058371335228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14429994033697072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019505477096737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643354612728537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4930771482235668,0.09404444507802026,0.09070426468770183,0.0,0.11238076175659573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14736624342339116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504826625849485,0.0,0.11354880592291078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4122218862221308,0.0,0.0,0.10055831393322053,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,azynazy,2020/03/03,"[Academic]Investigate factors that impact the quality of romantic relationships”Revised”.(US 18+) 

I am conducting a research study by utilizing survey method to ""Explore factors influencing the quality of romantic relationships."" I greatly appreciate your participation in this study by clicking the link below and taking the survey which will take approximately 10-20 minutes. All the information will be kept confidential, and you will have a chance to win one of the five $30 amazon gift cards by raffle at end of the study.
Thank you


[https://alliant.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_dalm2VmQGyykKa1](https://alliant.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_dalm2VmQGyykKa1?fbclid=IwAR383wEsFYlj-XPRo7Cm3DxodJ3YWzHvRHre49_JleW5KoKittuV5xWxgLc)",23.18227272727273,24.815074499999998,15.91954545454546,20.111818181818194,31.27272727272728,16.072727272727274,48.13636363636364,14.554592549557764,7.55624090909091,628,23,58,16,4,171,64,88,0.0,0.774,0.226,0.9601,0,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,3,0,1,0,3,0,0,9,0,6,0,0,1,1,8,10,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,5,3,12,5,1,5,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,1,40,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099131102666331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3857729137985568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371055539367309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3756684006448642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5261719589477142,0.0,0.0,0.3221466952584324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4208941772758496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CactusDinosaur,2020/03/03,"Hardcore struggling, dont know if anyone else could relate to this As I'm typing this out im supposed to be writing an essay for my AP english class. It's due in 3 days and the SAT is in 2 days. I feel like I have no hope of passing this class, let alone the SAT or AP test connected to this class.

I have this problem every time I have to write an essay, I can think of maybe one or two times ever that this wasn't the case for whatever reason. It doesn't matter if I understand the prompt, have plenty to write about and KNOW what I'm supposed to be doing, I just... can't write. 

I started this essay an hour ago, have an essay's worth of notes to refer to, yet I've written maybe 4 sentences total. It doesn't matter that I know the information and have it in my head, I just can't communicate the ideas to written words. I'll just sit there and stare at the paper or screen, or get distracted by some other thing. 

Communicating ideas verbally is even worse so I cant even explain what I know to anyone to describe what I WOULD write. I'm just sort of trapped in my head. 

I'm just exceptionally frustrated because I wanted to be done by now, I could be done by now, it just takes every ounce of energy to find the words I need.",4.231104651162788,4.334001751937986,5.4258817829457415,84.88207848837213,70.24031007751938,8.155426356589148,26.20251937984496,7.865858978985527,1.2788519379844958,964,26,211,11,16,322,129,258,0.10300000000000001,0.853,0.043,-0.9268,0,2,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,0,15,6,1,2,12,0,27,2,2,1,2,52,49,12,0,9,13,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,19,5,0,0,14,0,1,1,8,4,0,2,7,3,19,2,32,34,2,20,0,0,2,0,7,6,0,9,13,138,38,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756024775102583,0.0,0.0,0.13735504781018834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854629525923054,0.13588557847141325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084434714386654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117736733466671,0.0,0.0,0.1710587587822273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27143403991410786,0.15543047147114514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078757646286397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17518944177208634,0.11996301488565893,0.2234773175116244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705701019922078,0.0947442538343394,0.0,0.0,0.12121291622091328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928884148797347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722141964066098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317222781210065,0.13060467406801168,0.0,0.0,0.2994252529528539,0.14325311270065302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29153947126524593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561365001163647,0.0,0.06479177458053638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26647063507325786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833656784645307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986721786448891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12690009808602054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635616647486545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386961331734056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13864394959159168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971426076665586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810729945002856,0.08497798890305527,0.0,0.0,0.1546643921394357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12955115234054249,0.13806282473524967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822312432915292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515182234131118,0.0942099394658978,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chrissyk123,2020/03/03,"Aggressive self-reflection but I need your help Hey guys, I'm in need of some direction.

As a 23 y/o American female with a college degree, there are 3 major categories that I attempt to spend most of my time on: my boyfriend & loved ones, my job (web developer), and myself. 

*For context: I've been struggling with depression since adolescence. I am able to put on a facade that could be described as 'normal,' consequently, my mental illness has always been unbeknownst to most.* 

*Although I have never found it difficult to make friends in order to 'fit in,' making mutual, meaningful connections with others has only seemingly happened a handful of times in my life. The depression I experience has always been isolating regardless of my situation.*

Let's start with my boyfriend. Contrary to many love stories around me (as well as those in my past), I was the one who was interested first. As a matter of fact, I can tell you all about the first time I even looked at him -- employee orientation at new local bar. That's right...we were co-workers.

Our relationship started with me dating another and him not really noticing me. Then after a year or so, our acquaintance moved into a friendship. After awhile, that friendship transformed into our relationship today. I don't have to tell you the story...bartending can be a flirty profession.

Overall, my boyfriend and I have an awesome relationship. The best part is I actually feel something instead of the default numbness. I don't want to say he's my first love, but he's the first significant other that I'm undeniably attracted to, shares my beliefs and values, and works to make me feel loved. This dude checks all the boxes. Sometimes I can't even believe we're together and I've known this guy for years.

That being said, I can't imagine what I'd do if our relationship dissolved. However, I'm sick of being in fear of losing him. 

I am conventionally attractive, athletic, young, free-spirited, and smart; however, jealousy is now a plague that overcomes me. Everything now seems to be a competition in my head. I know I'll never be the most attractive, talented, or intellectual person in this world - but this relationship has put me at odds with my own mental peace. I now always feel like I have to be the best at everything. I feel like my boyfriend only took interest in me because I was the cool, down-to-earth, attractive blonde at our workplace; I feel like he is a privilege that could be taken away at any second. 

Despite the fact that my boyfriend has NEVER EVER made me feel inadequate, the people that surround us (past co-workers/friends?) seemingly never fail to tell me in/directly about how great of a guy my boyfriend is, how many 'options' are available to him, and/or that I don't deserve him.

I had self-confidence before dating this guy, but now I just feel like crap. On paper, I'm the much more desirable candidate: I have an 'outwardly pleasing' career (not-bartending, which he still does), a long-term plan, wellness goals, a retirement fund, and more...but he still just nonchalantly takes the cake. I don't understand. Sometimes I feel like I would be better off without him, but he is the person I want to spend the rest of my life with.

And if we're going down the list, my loved ones are always there for me but also never fail to make me feel as if I'm not meeting my goals or doing a good job.

Next, let's move to my job. It's rewarding during small intervals but most of the time my job makes me frequently consider suicide. Since starting my job at the beginning of 2018, I've started heavily abusing prescription medication and alcohol. I enjoy and am talented at my position, however, I feel as if the dynamics of the agency where I am employed will actually kill me. I don’t know why I hate it so much and, in case this matters, the hate I have for my current job has only gotten worse since I began my relationship.

I have had a job with a non-familial employer since I was 13 and have never experienced this caliber of despair towards a employment. I don't understand what's wrong with me. In theory, I've landed exactly what I've been working towards, but it doesn’t seem to be enough. This is the heaviest contributor to my depression.

Finally, myself. I know that I’m normal enough and, for the most part, can meet the goals I set. I don’t understand why self-hatred seems to follow me everywhere I go. Nothing I do is ever enough.

Can I ask, what am I doing wrong?

Are my negative feelings toward my relationships, my job, and myself all at the fault of my mental illness? Am I too insecure to be in a successful relationship? Do all ‘adult’ jobs make you want to die (and not in the comical way that everyone jokes about when I try to ask for advice)? Would talking to a therapist put me on a path to self-acceptance?

Basically, as the title states, I really need some direction or advice from from someone who can be objective. I know this is a lot of info but I’m desperate for a fresh perspective. Thanks to anyone who is able to provide some insight.",5.291744400689146,6.678097053347282,6.3709746492739425,74.42617277873494,68.52928870292888,10.100516859463454,32.155057839035194,10.295191815750387,3.5496415702682738,3997,173,713,107,68,1335,396,956,0.10300000000000001,0.6940000000000001,0.203,0.9988,17,0,2,0,0,3,158.0,6,4,0,19,29,56,5,3,54,1,83,17,3,9,15,131,153,49,3,18,23,0,12,5,1,3,8,2,0,7,37,28,2,0,30,3,4,9,21,20,2,8,18,18,115,36,110,116,26,101,2,7,2,5,59,43,1,23,50,502,152,23,0.08257232673338827,0.04891735242613838,0.08057867969045705,0.0,0.0,0.08068872202767045,0.0,0.04412235271495215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03301652992806532,0.1374135811467174,0.04473354075863624,0.0,0.028076006852219518,0.04329214209687727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028868245377104976,0.0,0.0,0.03675343857129537,0.07719397905095453,0.0,0.03878970954039982,0.0,0.0,0.02516766198402281,0.0,0.03513148415543963,0.04651536803815954,0.08665456259896727,0.036514256413362436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592728392523288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667913603157757,0.0,0.04284851933006213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036129799784739264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797892973477987,0.0,0.05453824304924237,0.07469139688527053,0.0,0.039450698376537904,0.07421068297360578,0.04038578996625401,0.03892092044767578,0.046458412024189794,0.2296307717947003,0.147474216792659,0.0,0.04522697391649119,0.0,0.1404719578746548,0.0,0.04526814713415108,0.06379517480470312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046927756162600864,0.034628875023229574,0.0,0.04551814086474082,0.0,0.1635191709375404,0.03650921791551923,0.0,0.0,0.08152307764761574,0.04237151467264785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02767324502972208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36873131923735614,0.0,0.04567702271124025,0.0,0.09075918263953857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443579853118723,0.058323276325606375,0.10085166988151344,0.0,0.0,0.03653695537973002,0.03466997904207391,0.046188656215737166,0.0,0.03510001968718977,0.1863118717893972,0.03906596603523381,0.16535300783748555,0.0837153790685018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04159146606726466,0.12482022619310955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776131563634375,0.06070016104272399,0.09183950100398164,0.19105460639778954,0.039874433849921086,0.043908303121790615,0.0,0.0809033484337376,0.03961518724432658,0.0470045706358296,0.0,0.0,0.08392971837473437,0.09419996299843318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941778323776052,0.07882462912053996,0.02862262726569838,0.07209897074047912,0.0,0.04531980937445882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451199249509892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052897946890674334,0.0,0.0,0.354607108324126,0.0,0.0352581579313927,0.039272595798005655,0.03283241421445431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18792686264592398,0.17228189027647473,0.0,0.0,0.1366093639054782,0.04640737744659919,0.0,0.0,0.03498163224193582,0.03178410561912584,0.0816661425082485,0.0,0.11689023571865105,0.0,0.0659423667923066,0.0,0.0,0.04316126213798988,0.0,0.04516036170769255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03104205672532662,0.03318425422207589,0.10825777963140913,0.03801075225706764,0.0,0.04793641779949538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962971754946008,0.0,0.03913445540725398,0.0,0.04587044661535647,0.0280305948310456,0.0,0.0,0.12894105629844646,0.049662171098916026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305494652385247,0.03277103476775979,0.0,0.0,0.07424243827110097,0.0,0.07450868157304702,0.0,0.0,0.03979838818531768,0.0,0.09017045594035747,0.0,0.042074127646275175,0.058657011795607075,0.09027987686194897,0.0,0.053173871176227794
mentalhealth,Cookie120101,2020/03/03,"I’m (19F) in a girl’s college and I’m going through a breakup. The past one year has been the worst for me in a lot of ways. I had a very good relationship and now we broke up three weeks back which I’m still dealing with. And I have friends who were always good to me but I think that was mainly because I was the talkative one in the group with a good sense of humour and I used to help out my friends with everything. But after my breakup I kinda started distancing myself from everyone around. I prefer to be alone. I feel like I didn’t just lose a boyfriend but my best friend too. And my friends are upset about the fact that I’m moody and upset and they want me to be all cheerful like I was. I feel like they’re not helping in any way. I had a panic attack last month and I’m really doubtful about meeting a therapist. And the fact that I’m in a girls college with drama around me all the time doesn’t help at all. Now my only hope is going abroad for my further studies because I desperately need a break from this day to day boring routine I have. I need help to cope with college, friends and breakup.  And I don’t know how I’m gonna deal with this anymore.",2.9796747967479646,3.976156073170735,3.890406504065041,91.51211382113821,73.6341463414634,6.767479674796747,26.268292682926827,6.937597516519254,0.9221804878048778,918,31,207,8,18,295,129,246,0.146,0.616,0.23800000000000002,0.9823,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,1,2,11,25,1,4,17,0,17,0,0,2,5,45,37,15,0,5,5,0,2,3,5,1,0,0,0,2,7,21,0,0,5,1,0,2,4,10,0,3,8,2,29,15,32,26,7,30,0,2,0,0,19,11,0,4,17,134,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195467129197865,0.0,0.0,0.09604382928586287,0.0,0.0,0.07849376129028142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11447175572551226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20550754592683226,0.0,0.13131394448231046,0.0,0.08875560844411261,0.0,0.14072545732066635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113265585022773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888067569830574,0.2379986487649351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029466253524788,0.10373760886260912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672589068038343,0.16492097370291206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4458899060102879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119871744954095,0.29044201308237216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3094709444863599,0.0,0.0,0.1146442421936546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343521048512113,0.09408774333550783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16917420507282654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913237179347442,0.0,0.09813121150426872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921320765356088,0.0,0.0,0.1711741014731756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15643153515249367,0.08778681204051901,0.0,0.13542775357784445,0.0,0.0,0.1101873506184428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394496727824974,0.0,0.0,0.12392452147459893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169924508815248,0.0,0.0921794973401338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13401869274609224,0.0,0.07396043615326686,0.0,0.0,0.06730593444063775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969116025502556,0.0,0.09523868782708092,0.06808135221057654,0.18323985984443494,0.09258792009015418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433067624175059
mentalhealth,godless_metalhead,2020/03/03,"Why I always feeling terrible about myself? Hello guys,
I am from India I work as remote consultant. I don't know why I always feel terrible about myself. I lost weight, changed my fashion sense, started going to meetups, uninstalled Instagram, enrolled on new courses but still I am not feeling good about myself. My mood always swinging. I literally want to cry somewhere. It seems like I am just killing myself everyday and right now I am not getting any kind of suicidal thoughts. I am not trying to gain any kind of sympathy here. I always thought depression and mental health is joke. After four fucking years I came to know I am suffering from depression.

Thank you in advance.",4.246866791744839,7.220690772357727,4.792682926829271,77.55348968105065,76.23577235772358,7.361851156973107,32.22576610381489,8.384062270229773,3.1568066291432144,547,28,84,11,13,174,81,123,0.29100000000000004,0.599,0.11,-0.9863,0,0,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,1,0,4,7,15,2,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,0,17,24,4,2,1,5,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,8,1,0,3,4,8,0,1,4,4,21,6,15,20,0,13,0,4,0,1,4,3,1,1,8,56,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4707063203628661,0.0,0.0,0.19234712850952526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16175204391714887,0.0,0.0,0.1496084537198838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15534826066520774,0.0,0.0,0.2436175675498388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21452555138800897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307447455955802,0.07388850611881588,0.0,0.08037484811126087,0.11862022810602907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400325692309396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15032771553996988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564653442994312,0.2945438747488629,0.15544650151350434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06909290629969396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15438163566318067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252271351909426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365887409193486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077581883946935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12874762636300566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001010458397268,0.0,0.11294185250759176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15469553670235486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13020475254222155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245506389475033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601800666570456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341588164135652,0.0,0.0,0.1722170387931532,0.0,0.0,0.25522737305631504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295877881194797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107279292171028
mentalhealth,Watthefuckover,2020/03/03,"What happens once I get help? I've been depressed for a few years now, and I have an appointment with an on base(army) mental health specialist on Wednesday. I'm terrified of being honest with them, because at times I suffer from suicidal ideation. But I know while I'm thinking it that it's not the answer, I have been on leave for the last two weeks and have been alone around loaded firearms every day, and it has been particularly bad lately and I didnt do anything, it's just that the thought was there. The best way I can explain the severity of the suicidal thoughts would be to relate it to cheating. If you're in a relationship, and you see an attractive person and they are coming on to you, part of you would want to go home with them, but you know the consequences of who would be affected, and arent willing to do that, but if you could do it without hiding it, and you were single or nobody would be hurt by it, you would do it in a heartbeat. I know that I'm loved by my adopted parents and my friends, so I dont do it. But the urge is still there. I'm terrified that if I'm open about this I will be sent to a psych ward, which would cause me to lose my firearm rights, I would likely be separated from the army, etc, and I'm afraid that it would just make things worse for me, because those are the only things that I can find fulfillment from when I'm not down. If anyone could give insight, it would be greatly appreciated.",9.044372146118725,5.8381806746575355,8.488356164383564,77.54557077625573,62.45890410958904,11.788127853881278,37.34703196347032,9.516144504307137,3.1429511415525115,1135,38,244,15,12,361,151,292,0.129,0.784,0.087,-0.8995,2,1,0,2,0,0,31.0,0,7,3,2,10,14,1,1,17,0,43,2,0,3,0,55,67,22,2,16,14,1,0,1,1,11,1,0,1,1,26,16,0,0,10,0,0,3,6,7,0,1,10,1,27,7,33,37,5,26,0,4,1,1,20,11,0,5,12,182,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444268128369563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051159879576889,0.0,0.08298499475700784,0.08977143158688249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419948796826328,0.12294561455074528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582824955213767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359328749021304,0.0,0.08686710394471071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16102946795365464,0.0,0.0,0.06503523426734789,0.0,0.08685571685516595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181869574685644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246632806676043,0.0,0.0,0.08496437014552351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216845087355503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791086212850874,0.0,0.0526861771985648,0.09673755919782176,0.05731126141714293,0.0,0.0,0.11117949306088948,0.0,0.0,0.08917491494124724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071911326243122,0.0,0.0,0.06759277280011992,0.0,0.10115350517786846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795425458381272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16626162214866913,0.08220030438215542,0.11375501970071583,0.10677791668100868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04926667618121616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281724792954373,0.0,0.0,0.091014523279074,0.0,0.06731332181782716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162577826668373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739424260203356,0.0,0.07669545909649256,0.0,0.0,0.11197394515685186,0.10920287628337128,0.0,0.0,0.08805200371603551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826737919837694,0.0,0.08611916151675499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080358619338948,0.0,0.0,0.11392360905996216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053315416582564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061121239672368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399089064339276,0.06461596535859454,0.0,0.1601157659706208,0.058802221220432674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850871831472027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059479669466640586,0.08004428483551299,0.08088997507764786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720881694690688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276738227495408,0.6447221965581709,0.0,0.0,0.06493942776601264
mentalhealth,softpaca,2020/03/03,"Destigmatize Asian Mental Health Survey Hello! I'm a Communication Design student doing my senior degree project on destigmatizing mental health in the Asian community. 

I created this survey open to any Asian struggling with their mental wellness. The goal of my survey is to collect your thoughts and personal experiences. I plan to use these personal accounts to design an expressive typographic book and / or a website.

I know not everyone will be comfortable with their personal stories being shared. There will be an option in the survey to stay anonymous (and still have your story in my project) or to not have the story shared at all.

Click this link to participate: [https://docs.google.com/…/1FAIpQLSchLvJ\_ClZNRZtB5…/viewform…](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSchLvJ_ClZNRZtB5s7pcQ-H4wRYhy1VOYI3nfsHFrbgMmkxwA/viewform?usp=sf_link&fbclid=IwAR1HO2aMsqNEBGDAXQpc6cI6sLN08OKDNiSlvCfPixwYQ7TIxSbdTLVVC1s)

Thank you for your time!!",16.598,21.71657613333334,11.510000000000002,33.91500000000002,46.0,9.8,33.66666666666667,10.125756701596842,4.180316666666668,816,26,80,15,10,228,76,120,0.022000000000000002,0.848,0.13,0.9114,0,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,4,2,2,3,6,0,1,8,0,9,2,0,1,1,16,14,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,3,6,0,0,3,1,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,12,5,16,8,1,10,0,0,1,0,13,6,0,3,3,59,15,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959698328244811,0.0,0.12299608472522312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728266225866905,0.0,0.17692309560010527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845073348456614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994000337751218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5468156207924402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47377950649148204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19278066240688574,0.14444099860174922,0.0,0.0,0.18908195466379496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665184700120618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358857149106016,0.10546527875452907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15621142612516228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16262158069457802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emecs2211,2020/03/03,"Why won’t any doctor/psychologist/psychiatrist help me (Australia) I was talking to people I know who have moderate anxiety and depression and they went through the whole process in 1-2 visits to a professional  and were diagnosed,prescribed meds and given the help they need

I have daily auditory hallucinations(occasional visual),paranoia, prior self harm, prior severe depression and severe anxiety,depersonalisation and derealisation but every single doctor/psychologist/psychiatrist just referred me to another one who does the same, this has been going on for 3-4 months and I’ve seen between 6-7 professionals over multiple visits with no progress being made while my symptoms are getting progressively worse 

Every appointment is the same, and I’ve not received any help and I’m at the point of the closest to suicide I’ve been since my last attempt

It feels as if I’m in a fucking pyramid scheme 
And Ive had to create my own coping mechanisms to be able to function, but even they have a limit

I just got referred from a psychiatrist today back to my GP who was told by the psychiatrist to refer me to another different psychiatrist.

This was my tipping point today after just going in fucking circles, it is just so draining and exhausting and is making me question if I should just give up trying to get help and just try and deal with it, even though inevitably its just going to keep getting worse like it has been and will lead to my eventual suicide

So my question is why were the people I know so easily and quickly able to go through the process is 1 doctor visit and 1 psychiatrist visit, but I’m just going back and forth for months?",12.173660022148395,9.31292386046512,11.716088039867113,55.740200719822816,56.24252491694352,14.152934662236989,45.01688815060908,12.311054993355176,5.5831858250276865,1346,60,213,31,12,447,156,301,0.124,0.7979999999999999,0.078,-0.9390000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,2,24.0,0,0,3,5,17,7,2,0,13,0,26,5,0,3,0,51,52,29,2,4,14,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,10,20,0,2,8,0,0,12,3,6,0,1,15,2,21,1,33,32,5,34,0,2,1,2,22,10,2,4,13,151,31,4,0.19441666466605656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220999880442358,0.20386282440362785,0.07436410816386059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949441450367712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021752223180312,0.1674507883953451,0.0,0.0,0.10156201754914318,0.0,0.29849054163774985,0.08506766670002475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841037342469658,0.0,0.16380442510314308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04915145361115947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17973507369537164,0.15236202455414655,0.09325109009305907,0.27622867715878835,0.0,0.07774638351688007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606267843965029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640323223067044,0.0,0.0,0.10684631446543533,0.07923776507470384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0474910809953907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198087445265757,0.06488731666736762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079765431721424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15518152689327228,0.0,0.0,0.07207874670263394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587088176027442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478403593844007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837865891289174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177911587699156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140949097287637,0.2196354925691816,0.0,0.08041173702906998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126602760431142,0.0,0.0,0.10103667769970076,0.0,0.07813237534310384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550669296353913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842842655595019,0.09288672731577256,0.0,0.13199615346321414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011309796132454,0.17543080028335625,0.10852963154014457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981271907750464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChanningTatumsTwin,2020/03/03,"One Step Forward, Three Steps Back I’m not sure what to do anymore. I thought I had life sorted out, but for the last five years or so my mental health has been on a decline. My situation seems to be most of the problem. Every time I start to feel like things are going well or I’m finally poking my head above water, something usually comes out of nowhere to ruin things.

For example: I spent this winter working hard to make sure I had money to cover bills and still get out to do something once in a long while. Nothing extravagant, just something, anything other than sitting in the house watching YouTube because I’m too scared to spend money on a subscription service. I finally caught up and paid rent on time this month! That was a huge thing for me. Then I found out that I actually owe money on my taxes for the first time in my life and it’s like $500 between state and federal. Then, out of nowhere, I get a court summons today - likely for one of the bills I’ve been putting off because I haven’t had money to pay it.

All of it is more money than I could dream of having. If I worked all the hours I possibly could, ate a cup of ramen a day, and spent the rest of the time sleeping, I still wouldn’t have enough money to pay all of these people who want to bleed me dry. Yes I’ve made mistakes, yes I’m trying to fix them, but I need the basics under control before I can pay debts.

I’ve been under so much stress that my doctors (paid thankfully by Medicaid) have me on a cocktail of meds just to make it through the day. I took a look at my life today and was so ashamed at what I’ve become that I wanted to take my own life. I wanted it more than I’ve ever wanted it before. I just wanted everything to end so I could have those few seconds of relief before it would all be over. 

I didn’t do it, obviously, but I crave that feeling of not having to worry about anything anymore. I guess I’m just writing to get people’s opinions and see how other people are doing. Have you gotten out of a hole you dug for yourself? How did you do it? How much support did you need? Things like that.

And thanks for reading. It’s my first time on this sub, so I’m not sure what to expect.",3.451305309734515,4.349090358407082,4.538219026548674,87.68396570796463,72.4070796460177,6.888938053097348,25.629424778761074,6.9077264865688965,0.9592663716814154,1710,52,362,14,32,560,210,452,0.073,0.8140000000000001,0.113,0.9640000000000001,5,0,3,0,0,0,45.0,0,4,1,5,19,18,0,3,20,2,35,11,2,7,9,69,78,25,0,16,13,0,3,4,0,2,7,0,1,0,31,15,3,1,5,3,20,8,6,6,1,7,22,6,41,12,67,49,13,62,0,1,3,0,7,24,0,8,34,252,72,9,0.0,0.0,0.07915557832851024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160886614856755,0.0,0.0,0.13349984685287972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06237167108000605,0.0,0.09889270199882508,0.08958405735811999,0.20706615868207545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987254206094141,0.0,0.0,0.09097626569156188,0.19428882330077693,0.0,0.0,0.10462365925496324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302363199915028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07184294185207928,0.08381246119474456,0.0,0.0,0.07337227091992256,0.06834205651028805,0.0,0.07290004690440682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202736691982583,0.0579478689083038,0.0,0.17771287840211575,0.0,0.13799108036046998,0.0,0.08893733131465505,0.0,0.0,0.12713617578456465,0.0,0.04609896430395224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935623299101961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266222550646348,0.0,0.08324638133691349,0.08622040545543302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988096613160324,0.09359468335564353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611874880760385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22917291200608386,0.15851284306039815,0.0,0.0,0.07178335124267406,0.06811534396579845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675204275770953,0.10828847046567616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900993854178182,0.0,0.08174384944310246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474443333026478,0.0,0.11925626903860904,0.12029002946020233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778310855666269,0.0,0.0,0.08638377927379312,0.10992991235269864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16870273550283016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144386491526824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776151581836022,0.0,0.08154198945797078,0.0,0.0,0.08113596614343363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812092800088132,0.0,0.06463736851747212,0.07384315331720345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117555200969776,0.08117259511079923,0.0,0.0,0.18733659610218076,0.0,0.0,0.05741291768994749,0.0,0.129555515177148,0.0,0.09291583074410573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204722358891852,0.22934699910127954,0.0,0.06098764492143075,0.0,0.0,0.14935777499299202,0.0,0.0,0.21555419064557232,0.0,0.0,0.06439546781439158,0.2364911738116968,0.0,0.15377320463588315,0.0,0.09012065583535753,0.05507109208706317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933562841424951,0.0,0.2392157397824584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293124137108066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181039387510961,0.08237522014771828,0.0,0.057621069364001985,0.0,0.0,0.052234766579558216
mentalhealth,EliteZaur,2020/03/03,"A Poem about Loneliness What is Mine

I internalize my stress.
Lonely is the name of my enemy.
Myself I try to oppress.
This hole might be the end of me.
I must set out to encounter,
people likeminded so passionatley.
When i'm not around her,
the space between brings anxiety.


/*Just a vent post. Im no poet but this helped me derive some deeper emotions. Even though I am around my friends of many years, some from childhood, at college I still feel an empty loneliness at the end of the day. It might be the looming stress of getting into the real world. I don't understand why some aspects of my future are so unsettling. Im definitely not the best Electrical Engineering student and sometimes that weighs on me that I could/should be doing more. I fear the chance that I won't be able to fully send the relationship with my girlfriend after college because ill be limited in options as far as location us concerned. Its a long distance one at the moment but it had its roots planted well before college so thats not my worry. I don't think I could tell anyone these secret pains but her but i feel as though it is wrong to bring these to her and have her worry about affairs that she cannot help me in. I Love Her, it would be wrong to emotionally burden her with these as she has her own stresses to content with, we all do.

Tldr; Sometimes the people who shine the brightest or appear as though they are always enjoying life secretly internalize their problems to protect those they care about.",4.390452898550723,6.254037513888887,5.0268115942029015,81.3254347826087,71.43055555555556,7.647584541062804,28.14673913043478,8.321376580360154,2.0465514492753623,1196,45,218,19,23,384,169,288,0.188,0.6829999999999999,0.129,-0.9357,0,2,0,0,0,0,27.0,2,0,3,2,16,16,0,4,17,0,26,5,0,1,2,42,37,19,0,4,9,0,2,0,2,5,3,0,0,0,19,10,1,2,6,0,0,4,8,10,1,1,1,3,39,6,38,24,7,30,0,1,1,1,27,13,0,9,11,169,58,4,0.10753261963495246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947575379483495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226215969101558,0.0,0.0,0.0751893079067005,0.0,0.0,0.19145365942876444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655508868477764,0.0,0.09150233915767077,0.0,0.1128488500714622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963667239124993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717120935392268,0.0,0.0,0.06934964371287873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419194471888171,0.19048396724817884,0.0,0.0,0.07102428110459665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100409293713275,0.10874344696227274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307943518376801,0.0,0.05618135551406021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441536965019387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323073637918465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595346936553869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516298452273292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705238757431912,0.0,0.0,0.10902119839780457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281502323874257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286688603071374,0.0,0.11442228890499255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909915767074167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298652484874196,0.0,0.0,0.10289419439315188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12239566303102922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544979052845905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21270502084186474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587568894602053,0.0,0.3695347574311224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398824925301648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890256068520166,0.3169507584552296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300759010559628,0.0,0.0,0.11194524938150044,0.12934850127860828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966847392002774,0.0,0.09703146359150064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21840918999373296,0.0,0.07638808772708919,0.2351400776347712,0.0,0.06924748144948678
mentalhealth,_Emzy,2020/03/03,"My friend has scars on her wrist. This is a post I wish I didn’t have to write, but I’m so confused. So at the start of today I had drama (the subject) at school and in drama you obviously move around a lot and I noticed what resembles scars on my friends left arm.

I am not extremely close with this friend but we are friends nonetheless I’m just not friends enough with her to feel I can approach her about this. 

My mind of course instantly jumped to self harm, who wouldn’t but, but she seems just as happy as ever, and more strangely no one else seemed to notice. 

I would think this was self harm but she wasn’t covering it anything, no one noticed and she seemed happy. I also have never noticed it before and they look not that new. 

I suppose I’m just asking if I’m over thinking this and it’s simply self harm, or I’ve made a terrible mistake?",2.4089904761904752,4.140973822857145,3.3222857142857163,92.02304761904765,76.4857142857143,6.2666666666666675,23.666666666666664,7.0316486544052195,0.6966380952380944,669,21,145,7,15,213,102,175,0.17300000000000001,0.675,0.152,-0.6555,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,1,1,0,9,13,0,1,5,0,13,2,2,1,3,42,28,18,0,5,13,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,0,3,11,11,0,0,6,2,0,3,9,6,0,2,5,2,21,7,18,21,3,18,0,0,1,0,20,9,0,7,5,99,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950857635218501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210699636140612,0.09963942212375627,0.10463733140438196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524226618436184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350126776750384,0.0,0.0,0.11565127961251002,0.0,0.0,0.10124505233473433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05659403036429138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43237548641157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382983293223025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160982123499693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093991115146787,0.0,0.0,0.09515696528312056,0.0,0.10590873757039587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301511431794675,0.0,0.0,0.1189614783643041,0.0,0.0,0.08632557621617623,0.1081005125169722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5097219130932896,0.0,0.0,0.1516902719482228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719583896259337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327685235592864,0.0,0.3056844429820722,0.3502951422403056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922303321581126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14343755768376953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060944138421948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871138167339224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951025789713823,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blindsey6,2020/03/03,The intense ball of hate! Have any of you guys ever had a hatered toward an individual to the point you’ve had homicidal thoughts toward them?,5.38111111111111,7.051355444444442,5.8453703703703725,77.1991666666667,68.62962962962962,8.362962962962964,32.01851851851852,8.841846274778883,2.674051851851852,115,5,21,2,2,37,22,27,0.141,0.813,0.046,-0.5707,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,1,0,1,2,2,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,2,0,5,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,15,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117022491310386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4146151645143473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4538509840943138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4525381189817828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4333007617400335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36388866184858293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lucas_Aubergine,2020/03/03,"Needing Experienced People To Talk With. Ok so normally I'd just work out my issues by myself by letting my thoughts process things and devise a solution. But lately that hasn't worked for my current situation and despite a lot of things happening that should make it better I still can't seem to be my usual self again.   


I don't find much success in talking about my problems cause someone either doesn't have the answers I want or they say the things I want to hear but I dismiss them as kind words said just to make me feel better. Add onto the fact that my fear of burdening others with my issues actually came true when I finally tried to talk with a person I saw as my friend and well...I'm not the biggest fan of it anymore.  


Trying to get a therapist worked once in the past but they didnt take my insurance so we only got 2-3 sessions in before that fell through. Now I'm attempting to get a new therapist but so far none have been able to take me in or they just haven't called back. So while I'd like professional help I think it'd benefit me to have some help over none until that can happen. So I joined this thread in the hopes that could happen.",5.4621337386018265,5.530602608510642,5.970045592705167,82.15750000000003,67.59574468085106,9.09726443768997,29.551671732522802,8.841846274778883,2.11016717325228,923,30,189,14,14,299,143,235,0.055999999999999994,0.772,0.172,0.9812,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,4,7,14,13,0,1,11,1,16,0,0,3,2,43,39,19,0,8,11,0,1,1,1,1,0,3,0,2,14,10,0,0,6,0,0,2,9,3,0,0,7,6,27,10,31,27,6,25,0,0,1,0,17,10,0,6,14,128,41,6,0.1109389403654619,0.0,0.10826040266215052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11002161866000253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853051972889268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440086721195773,0.0,0.0,0.19623295479177674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328106183025835,0.1268845933071545,0.0,0.1139648512928978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885757166980847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483715077249,0.05609406159096813,0.0,0.0,0.12152818651779874,0.1013961816656684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571115013041568,0.0,0.11592203501009585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872800507533196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943088157511031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503624858847076,0.0,0.14872006646894093,0.0,0.0,0.1101873996450297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315828617999268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552583464653407,0.0,0.0,0.12514395689235674,0.0,0.0,0.11344258286685632,0.0,0.0541991625202366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431631988466553,0.0,0.0,0.14810520829787155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155288596669495,0.08225981857878081,0.0,0.10714551990925668,0.0,0.0,0.108696606990819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814635083388425,0.0,0.08437406324804651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590377158159077,0.07691109273412766,0.096867603612712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615358329858628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552833704927282,0.08822309814163641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099464473350936,0.1157335096850468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470001713016984,0.0,0.0,0.09399820416118704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859598108152922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668245532666963,0.2675055539201571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25761732076476584,0.2211087073796144,0.07108519346810932,0.0,0.08807312665028688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15064051656969404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218356947711699,0.0,0.1308693227127639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974743061967954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24229460958737714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon04050607080908,2020/03/03,"Is there something wrong? Or is this common?      I have always felt this constant dull feeling. It's been a feeling that's been with me since I was a kid. The best way to describe it is a grey feeling, not happy and not overly upset. It had been around for such a long time, and I'm sick of it. When I watch other people laugh around me it makes me jealous because I can't remember the last time I laughed and it was genuine. My emotions don't feel real and i sometimes don't think they are. I can't ever find interest in anything, and I've tried everything like drawing, running, 5 different sports, singing, jobs, TV shows, reading, video games, trying hard in academics, going to parties, and every kind of friend group. And yet nothing has ever been able to make me interested. When I date, I date hoping that the person will be able to make me interested in something, and it works for about a week, but that's about it.
 I don't know if there's something wrong with me, or if I'm just feeling something that everyone else feels. I'm going to counseling right now, but I feel like openly expressing this to someone face to face  is a lot harder than anonymously posting on Reddit. And I don't want to sound spoiled because I really do have it easy, but I just can't get out of this constant boredom.",6.459983388704318,5.907977600775197,6.59869324473976,80.57651162790702,65.62790697674419,9.07685492801772,33.932447397563685,8.192908349453996,2.4945517165005517,1023,40,201,11,14,328,140,258,0.086,0.78,0.135,0.8065,2,0,4,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,2,15,17,1,1,9,0,25,3,2,3,2,47,46,18,0,4,11,0,9,2,1,1,1,1,0,2,18,15,0,0,12,7,0,3,9,5,0,0,8,12,22,12,26,36,2,31,0,1,2,0,7,10,0,6,18,131,40,4,0.21802000072104655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070505290901223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970594204272497,0.1940840235660864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290296885106448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439926999580136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23560216775522594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389224878087847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106386744348896,0.1226215780606664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972115725327878,0.09184562686650438,0.1041637268654165,0.09797115931863837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38583112096416267,0.07787676603878581,0.10466669539697128,0.0,0.09963316544684916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422085586754267,0.0,0.05695322596653021,0.0,0.123905790682659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604317241649716,0.09765154857685322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827152698106447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817560483882586,0.0,0.0,0.1135171404646758,0.05990904534034632,0.08885769966476123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651355973669348,0.0,0.0,0.09647041997440292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267640407201408,0.0,0.0,0.2182950651515239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459803536188994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557380861090028,0.095183327603084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440144719808643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090395000147725,0.12407724573653164,0.06983459759154025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348708017890647,0.09309394468736418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017419877648618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236381955464948,0.3356848960971643,0.10781367773504924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984920660012832,0.0,0.0,0.12712921569084454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802126928088216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429692256435694,0.08652706428832461,0.08744124690735337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936057856529916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383706454353711,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MsRawrie,2020/03/03,"Looking for additional support from POCs I'm Black and i was looking for some support for how to handle cultural issues when you are suffering from Depression and BPD. I couldn't find a subreddit so I created one. 

If you're a POC dealing with Depression and/or any other mental illness and are looking for additional support from peers like you, please consider joining r/BlackMentalHealth. We're an active community that supports each other and we post memes and mental health resources. We value multicultural neurodiversity, everyone is welcomed. 

I'm looking forward to meeting and healing with you all",6.161624007060901,9.639441349514565,6.850167696381291,62.62799646954989,72.39805825242719,9.182347749338039,38.489849955869374,9.573946990214177,5.0347747572815535,501,30,65,14,11,164,69,103,0.113,0.6679999999999999,0.21899999999999997,0.8525,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,2,3,0,0,3,9,0,0,3,0,5,3,0,1,1,19,15,10,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,13,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,1,5,8,6,11,13,3,3,0,3,5,0,9,1,0,2,3,44,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973309387472425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18026283624274791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14755715310418227,0.2465493166306493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676351937915274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081504246676998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521367933757236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493868970373217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699243860101759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4807609036817873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2884757283793982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09698623123535813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710993423957825,0.0,0.0,0.13707563829331113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6496730959213511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nickynick3103,2020/03/03,"I don’t want to commit suicide but I can’t stop fantasising over it in my head. I’m confused. (M/19/UK) My father committed suicide when I was 8 years old and I found his body. Since then I have battled with PTSD and depression in varying levels of intensity. 

Things reached their worse when I broke up with my girlfriend around December 2018. I found myself in a downhill spiral where I was self harming, drinking, chain smoking and working 60 hours a week in a job that I hated and I attempted suicide around 6-7 times.

Eventually I was able to get my life in order a little bit, I got back with my girlfriend and moved 153 miles away from home with her and out of my family home for the first time. I have a job I love and me and my girlfriend almost never argue and I’ve started regularly going to the gym and creating music as an outlet for any emotions I may have and all m symptoms of depression and anxiety were non-existent.

This had all been going super well until about 2-3 weeks ago when I suddenly found myself only able to get 3-4 hours of sleep a night if I was lucky, whilst some days I would be awake all through the night and miss a whole nights worth of sleep. Now I find myself panicking around crowds and social interaction for the first time in forever. I’ve started using CBD oil on suggestion from some friends and relatives but I don’t know if it’s making a difference. 

I don’t think I want to kill myself but if I’m being really honest. I just don’t know. I guess I’m just confused and I just don’t really know what to do. I feel like I’m numb and the good and bad moments are almost impossible to tell apart these days.",3.93117764471058,5.0468332305389225,5.135104790419163,83.03353542914174,71.48502994011976,8.32115768463074,26.790918163672647,8.72156446121922,1.869471457085828,1305,43,264,23,24,433,186,334,0.209,0.659,0.133,-0.9884,2,0,1,0,0,5,27.0,0,0,1,5,14,21,4,2,14,0,22,9,4,2,6,65,49,30,4,6,9,1,1,1,4,2,3,0,2,1,7,26,1,1,9,2,1,3,7,13,1,2,11,2,41,8,39,34,7,54,0,4,0,1,16,19,0,12,32,167,48,3,0.18128334042879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803483716396313,0.0,0.18152907911516244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163944398110215,0.0,0.06934062961685072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420709109225566,0.0,0.0,0.08516083290774958,0.06969784941847194,0.0756820085239256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895722788735582,0.10068246190634776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169127573800006,0.0,0.1561390754742359,0.0,0.0,0.09470125327795806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879432916585614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195967895591942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544889977606589,0.0,0.04583115193785837,0.06475442731222585,0.0,0.0,0.08284484446364608,0.15419951676009136,0.0,0.29815173868108785,0.07002952956125695,0.0,0.09471306318009386,0.0,0.10302750004190092,0.07602593251091923,0.07249442394460821,0.0,0.0998520187734142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948988373376897,0.0930245037624592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818419713901806,0.0,0.1785275735742561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17989574289726193,0.0,0.10028157841151288,0.0,0.14944287439610207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402289226507928,0.04428294157914213,0.09084676597599488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180764625557117,0.0,0.060504018712212865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633775072338302,0.0,0.0,0.06990844395106167,0.0,0.0,0.25518320178322546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511318531989914,0.0,0.0,0.06893707466813781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595526192193527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613474990391215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455903024734846,0.0,0.0,0.07497972626652254,0.0,0.18141426108920372,0.09239776800888523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831328141573006,0.0,0.0,0.07578049496455637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974418264284865,0.0,0.0,0.09421140142842213,0.0,0.0,0.07922481496071704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060218298071028034,0.058079522323153415,0.0,0.0,0.15856166046905015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828530047408427,0.0,0.0,0.10692561107429313,0.0,0.1454145608494476,0.0,0.08149774714971961,0.0,0.0,0.10119818779371427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598821545316155,0.0,0.09237160568299617,0.06438924188373933,0.0,0.0,0.05837026381417783
mentalhealth,DreamingMeme,2020/03/03,"First day of partial program tomorrow I'm copying this post from r/anxiety to here to get more responses.


I didn't really know which subreddit to post this in, I just need to open up about this a little bit.

Tommorow, I'm going to attend my first day at a partial hospitalization Program that is 7/8 hours a day. I'm doing this because my therapist believes it will really help me, and I trust her judgement. This will last at least two weeks, or until I feel like I can improve how I feel.

I am diagnosed with MDD (Major Depressive Disorder), GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder), and ADHD-C (Hyperactive and Inattentive).

I know deep down that this is the right thing to do, it's just I'm a college student and I have always had high standards for myself regarding academic achievement and not giving up. Doing this program means I am probably withdrawing and costing my parents money for financial aid even though I've only done about a month this semester.

I really suffered through my first semester with panic attacks, constantly feeling depressed, worthless, self hating etc, daily intrusive thoughts and feelings that would stop me from doing basic things ( like I wouldn't go to the bathroom if someone else was in it), and I could never focus on my work and it really got to me. I secluded myself because I lived on campus and it really took a toll on me.

I also had a few instances of self harm during high school, and had a breakup over a year and a half ago that destroyed me. I lost my best friend who was also my gf at the time, along with the group of friends I saw every day for years that still chill with her. 

I recently relapsed with self harm, and the trigger was news that I got that my ex is dating someone who I know is deep into drugs, a bad student and other things. I feel as though I've gotten over her as a gf, but I still haven't gotten over the loss of a person who I've had the upmost respect for and who I've connected with in every way. I've have not felt this connection (romantically or in a friendship) since.

I keep losing track of my thoughts as I am writing this, so it may sound unorganized and frantic.

I've been on countless medications to try and help me with my anxiety, depression and ADHD, but apparently I'm one of a very low percentage of people who react adversely to medication. These meds have all taken their tolls on my mental health and my hope that things will get better. 

This program that I am going in is stopping me from completing this semester, and school was my only ""job"" and only large responsibility. I feel as though I'm failing myself and my family, and I just want to be like the people who can function and push past their problems. I had no trouble completing high school, and it was very easy for me to pass without much effort and basically no studying. This caused me to have no study skills and I was not prepared for the college workload, especially when I got worse during and after my senior year of high school directly after my breakup.

I again lost my train of thought even though I feel I have so much to write about.

Basically, I'm seeing a therapist weekly, tried tons of different medications, and I'm really trying to be better but I keep letting myself and my family down. 

Also, I smoke weed regularly because it is the only medication that has had long-term beneficial effects on me. Recently, I was caught with product and a piece and charged with two misdemeanors, and this is going to cost my family hundreds of dollars in court fees and I probably will have to complete some program for my sentence. I have stopped smoking because I am afraid of a drug test from the law, and this has caused me to have vivid dreams every night. I used to dream about my ex and times that we used to have, but now the dreams feel like times that haven't happened and I don't feel anything towards her in these dreams. They're just innocent and friendly interactions like when we were just friends. These are taking a toll on me because I remember everything when I wake up. 

I've also had another really good friend move away last year, and my current best friend was kicked out of his house and lived with us for a while, and just moved out of state two days ago. My other friend just had a child with someone at a young age, so I haven't been able to see him. I have nobody else.

My thoughts are racing again and I cannot focus on what I want to write so I'm going to end this here, I'm basically looking for validation that this program is what I need, and that it's ok that I'm stopping school to focus on myself and my mental health.

Thanks for reading, and I hope you all have good fortune and happiness.",7.939802985805187,6.8026966244493385,8.055985315712189,73.24398286833092,62.931718061674005,11.19886441507587,35.92667645619187,10.30485914683132,3.5478874400391582,3717,143,696,71,45,1214,360,908,0.095,0.7709999999999999,0.134,0.9932,5,0,3,0,0,0,89.0,3,1,2,17,37,48,3,3,34,1,71,10,1,8,3,137,136,75,0,11,18,3,10,5,9,7,9,1,0,5,59,64,0,6,20,5,5,12,15,23,0,8,37,16,104,25,110,88,15,111,0,11,5,0,43,43,0,7,57,492,163,24,0.04561043025090713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962974742340616,0.0,0.08086178888308626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589857837222342,0.03795153174414212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047826512964749934,0.1046755629021194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03753349783597766,0.0,0.0,0.0518884489459072,0.04285250062427918,0.0,0.03808280411056312,0.13901847470122464,0.0,0.0,0.05138733601028304,0.09573066521679886,0.08067743812925574,0.049794776836124204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370895167785437,0.0,0.0,0.14346500502997986,0.0492886716990314,0.0,0.03641621720086168,0.0,0.0,0.1470747712754219,0.0,0.1178525902244645,0.04629362661265645,0.0,0.04765319192697124,0.10454700913980552,0.0,0.0,0.04667530574982622,0.0,0.0,0.10578723747563017,0.0,0.0762033237441073,0.0,0.040397303309372586,0.0,0.05086768630250029,0.06025051803702315,0.0,0.11528626394434675,0.0,0.04099171373199522,0.0,0.12899236324864385,0.0,0.20755803577454326,0.06516820096928587,0.04379316571147642,0.0,0.0,0.11638862601396753,0.0,0.0,0.2466695368920071,0.0,0.04765913461002596,0.04375368076410688,0.1296072930218406,0.07651172984450946,0.10943648299124564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04033315284011808,0.048553151124594914,0.0,0.04503085711622997,0.0,0.09696350903368263,0.0,0.0,0.061143419941152424,0.1927596949858886,0.0,0.0906028972240496,0.04491708627561861,0.05262831273596002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04526131421918357,0.08108129215937462,0.0,0.0,0.0751988989502976,0.07435717639504448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04663975513274643,0.0,0.11141476174385932,0.045713633401368525,0.08054969106673998,0.0403637954955154,0.038301274130368365,0.05102640475454028,0.09957834502102428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049683129699046126,0.0506629058732834,0.18379084006863894,0.09192917201046176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0364058102773872,0.09695333833776418,0.0670578284755665,0.06763911220676883,0.03517757560333402,0.0,0.0,0.04280229905519603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030906807945227432,0.1387551499620682,0.0,0.053514012583252495,0.05064498516312395,0.0,0.04354031660224823,0.06324105889446717,0.03982526841878516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736436858588459,0.0,0.09835151620430643,0.04364302192696422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04562277308108885,0.0,0.20453446678382128,0.0,0.0900695947789321,0.0,0.051667726252277515,0.03895105822311775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23080095219287325,0.0726912154153231,0.0,0.14274487805075226,0.0,0.0,0.037729419228731534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11593670862045913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728490970315381,0.15252944795852633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03429336726060098,0.0,0.0,0.04199195622047247,0.0,0.10591444988981527,0.12120617272389005,0.0,0.17924806457885253,0.14483834753888924,0.07978742600600372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050674866234130284,0.092899464579279,0.0,0.1336642887012385,0.0,0.05486373172768602,0.07878553492006306,0.0,0.0752667633353501,0.05380442697496935,0.036203436542392484,0.07317187193707198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043966827149875376,0.0,0.033204936440262914,0.0,0.046480925033743486,0.032400341023070406,0.0,0.0,0.1174864867395527
mentalhealth,spike_the_bunny,2020/03/03,"Is it normal to create a ""fake world"" as a coping/daydreaming method So for awhile now (about 4 yrs) I've been having an imaginary world in my head as like a coping mechanism and a way to calm down is it normal or am I just crazy? Thx! <3",-0.09470588235294032,2.047210803921569,2.301470588235297,93.70161764705885,88.01960784313727,5.752941176470588,14.382352941176471,7.1686216300943375,-0.2455647058823529,185,3,42,3,6,63,40,51,0.105,0.7090000000000001,0.18600000000000005,0.4926,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,0,5,1,1,0,0,5,5,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,8,4,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,2,27,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4275486287443058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20352821227912893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8163530605620836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3306752445772809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sharingan123412,2020/03/03,"How do I persuade someone with depression to take action? Obviously with a mental illness like depression, one's brain doesn't work properly so simple logical reasoning is extremely difficult to use unless one's analysis level is at the level of a World Debate champion or something. For instance, someone might say that ""done so much wrong already"" and that it's ""too late to change"" so they'll just continue doing bad things because they believe that they're a bad person. Obviously that's not true because people always change (be it physically through growth or mentally through hormones or even in what you want to do). That should be common sense for most people. 

​

I really just don't understand how to convince someone with depression that the assumptions they make about the world and the people around them aren't true. It's very frustrating for me and it leaves me feeling so damn powerless knowing that my words are cries on deaf ears. I can't understand them and they can't understand me. I want to help those around me but what I'm doing isn't working. How can I help?",6.054925373134324,7.9385922039801,6.073810945273633,75.3832537313433,67.25870646766168,9.738109452736321,33.30049751243781,10.047579312681364,3.6729924378109455,887,40,147,22,15,280,116,201,0.147,0.772,0.081,-0.9034,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,6,2,14,13,2,0,7,0,20,4,2,6,4,39,31,16,0,3,8,0,1,1,0,3,2,3,0,1,15,9,0,0,7,0,0,2,7,9,0,2,1,4,17,4,22,25,2,14,0,3,0,0,11,9,1,5,4,104,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283046013177336,0.0,0.09674426902131504,0.12597630206023774,0.14127831547949704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070062955307655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941578047914779,0.14175175648876487,0.0,0.0,0.13099419261344786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979351194359565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459922013943917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277149107341697,0.0,0.0,0.3004243088368692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898250554301558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679390076985577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058788581492959215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586394529604514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389783824976704,0.0,0.13115533978916347,0.12311099748496244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056802659538279975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760977597807825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23434154404741786,0.12334194752902315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547033940239786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15757237745244473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418167225552175,0.10152071088270977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448424183345558,0.11954284244197175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246096017222663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29554043309344835,0.08950876729820406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741904728044159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724327610870363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3631171863605106,0.0,0.10041819967479004,0.0,0.09593325573219706,0.13715572780820834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16928894071888415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712077833148344,0.14127831547949704,0.0
mentalhealth,BS_500,2020/03/03,"I've been struggling, more than usual. I honestly shouldn't be. I am back living with my dad after having moved out in 2014, and he basically caters to my every need, but I think that pushes me further into this rut that I'm in.

Some background: I was diagnosed with PTSD and general depression in 2014 after being admitted for suicidal thoughts. The depression was from, as far as I can tell, losing my younger brother when I was 3 years old. Then it only got worse as I grew up, through nearly daily domestic violence between my mother and her husband. (parents never married, shared custody) 

The PTSD is a combination of two separate events, the first being a car accident when I was 10, was literal inches from being crushed by twisted metal. The accident lead my mother to become hooked on opioid pain killers, which lead to the second event: my mom's boyfriend in 2011 was physically abusing her, and I attempted to stop him, he nearly killed me that night. When I told my mom to get rid of the guy or lose me, she chose him for sex and drugs over me. 

I went on to do well in high school, but right before enrolling in college, she became sick from the drugs she kept taking after I left her to live with my dad (she made me constantly feel as though her decline was my fault) I tried to fight through the depression that sent me through, but it eventually lead to a suicide attempt.

I dropped out, and after a few months of nothing, I got help. From Summer 2014 - August 2015, I was making progress, got a job, counseling, and other support networks. But then I got the call, while I was at work, that my mom had died of an OD. I got sent into a spiral. By this time, I was living with a co-worker, my dad had moved 300 miles away. So I was alone.
 My cousin came in and had me live with him for the following 4 years, but we clashed a lot, too, due to my triggers. I had started thinking of ending it, because my job was screwing with my health, physically and mentally, and my cousin wasn't the best roommate, either. I quit my job, and then he and I got into another big fight. It became clear we could no longer live together.

My dad has allowed me to come back to him, and it's been a few months now, and I have kinda just stagnated. I guess, what I'm saying is, I have no idea what I'm supposed to be doing now, and it becomes so daunting to even consider what I need to do. 


TL;DR: PTSD from domestic violence and the death of my mother are catching back up to me, and it's getting harder to fight without help from family and friends. Seeking moral support, if anything.",6.3149323753169915,5.899031053254441,6.7396358129050435,78.99352810650889,65.8836291913215,9.688616511693436,33.294519582981124,9.140100540675403,2.7642697097774014,2012,77,394,31,28,656,253,507,0.235,0.722,0.043,-0.9990000000000001,5,1,3,0,5,1,75.0,2,0,0,12,16,20,5,1,22,0,38,8,0,7,2,69,71,39,6,5,10,15,1,0,1,1,6,1,0,1,19,33,0,2,6,0,0,15,6,13,1,3,33,2,70,7,75,31,7,80,1,5,0,2,47,29,1,6,35,281,89,9,0.0,0.08748356080253641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647180598496932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742346136011413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06076071909226505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693713323552041,0.17032592958629228,0.0,0.045009727187534015,0.16309207456337013,0.0628289794472503,0.0,0.07748630414320233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539478943043483,0.0844486893024867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360315761419551,0.0,0.07979046207265679,0.0,0.058952020763263675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19078446032974125,0.07494196396685382,0.076630088510415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712525874325049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539676129286823,0.0,0.0,0.04876796745148939,0.0,0.0622099964262205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960598931874203,0.0,0.03733368926472429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280484561349763,0.0,0.0,0.057045493849678726,0.0,0.07715250262245656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3543202624245008,0.0,0.08133865468615274,0.0731092272148954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848419244513548,0.0,0.0,0.0989814000181896,0.07801176518726657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335183240754758,0.0,0.0,0.21981244682043266,0.0,0.08168857052660962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022300670762438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3259926088732089,0.0,0.0,0.16520714691328106,0.0,0.06277270854163633,0.0,0.0698653881588046,0.049286089010626144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07440929994483536,0.0,0.0,0.25942741698862104,0.11787034724327078,0.15695192016320572,0.0,0.10949688500671086,0.056946858481499676,0.0,0.0,0.06929006405853795,0.0,0.07084761276125541,0.0,0.07747843891259568,0.0,0.0,0.05615558884422005,0.07856668697323074,0.0,0.08198611625210259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589309230053481,0.0,0.0,0.07853365181065575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305552222667422,0.0,0.058717333681564884,0.0,0.0747259521811801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226148563107486,0.0,0.0,0.061730184202434285,0.0,0.07718939626310285,0.0,0.1615291528822972,0.16757638686650067,0.0,0.0,0.055515466849240434,0.0,0.06453589968257957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946222273442403,0.07254347401421822,0.05861751938932416,0.043054352850630494,0.0,0.0,0.07055344165115171,0.0,0.05012978269696234,0.0,0.07212702223077902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131989887585547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638741203773632,0.06844669182288275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117524845422298,0.0,0.10750694349565287,0.0,0.07524517010020776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509589872378517
mentalhealth,aaaaaeeeeeeea,2020/03/03,"Video games are my life I am dictated by my computer. No matter what activity I try, I am never fulfilled or entertained as much as I am after playing video games. This addiction is worse than any shitty trailer park drug you could find, I'd honestly rather be hooked on black tar heroin rather than video games. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope that maybe one day I'll find something that fulfills me, like a good job or a family. However, growing up on video games has pretty obviously limited my charisma and social skills. Eventually, that hope is gonna run dry. Hopefully that day never comes, because I'd probably just neck myself. Don't let your kids play video games, because I will probably not live past my late twenties if I'm being honest.",7.511948275862068,7.383820634482759,7.673232758620692,72.3319181034483,63.3448275862069,11.112068965517242,33.98706896551724,10.686352973137794,3.6455,612,23,108,14,8,199,103,145,0.114,0.687,0.19899999999999998,0.8959,2,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,2,3,10,0,0,4,0,14,4,1,0,3,21,22,6,0,7,7,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,1,8,2,0,2,2,13,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,1,14,10,9,16,1,14,0,0,1,0,9,3,0,6,8,62,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740608401896406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442794824590018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18722087631418807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228072739993327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260737486592985,0.0,0.0,0.1980705630749572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17808405812258313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14476531109235627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807071761627721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727326000522215,0.12880116420308135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4575674344187037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238735228283873,0.13649364413065934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17322549121681252,0.0,0.0,0.15702833464757862,0.10846592454760486,0.0750230117718234,0.0,0.13559873769262532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15427444086360745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128863037620017,0.0,0.2368741473109682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405810594627422,0.11679140499507358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659303820570355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562285420384918,0.3311332736561292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565379035318162,0.0,0.1182201213337397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202027968236492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042590394611911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15649357999744476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sorachan_222,2020/03/03,Help My boyfriend has had a history with mental health and  cutting but he has told me that he tells me when he has cut.. I being the understanding one that used to cut but no longer does talks to him and not scolds him. I’m really afraid he is really going to hurt himself soon and I don’t know what to do. I’ve talked to him saying that I can’t “make him” go see a doctor or a professional to talk to.. he told me today that he has never been happy and the last time he was happy was 15 years ago. He has “highs” where he is happy in the moment and then nothing. What should I do?...,1.1324581818181798,2.668901344000002,3.0962181818181835,93.10410909090912,79.56,6.1454545454545455,16.96363636363636,6.980632752743323,-0.2476400000000001,448,7,106,5,11,151,74,125,0.18,0.8059999999999999,0.013999999999999999,-0.9714,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,8,3,1,6,0,17,2,0,2,1,16,27,10,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,6,6,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,5,0,1,6,2,13,3,9,19,0,15,0,1,1,0,22,3,0,1,10,67,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420237144568429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399005572522676,0.14020797435667684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18211132283776116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5116655691060358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17030439110918222,0.0,0.0,0.10739084225792396,0.16927926192089393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715168330106059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805169989851637,0.1305991684578699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694685283250167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16146220181629872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12357010701297827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373362682274208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085679584143756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052796867227933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274118959328527,0.0,0.0,0.12767311438772946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3863318168992039,0.14003771661163592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342448610848866,0.0,0.15186806328554298,0.3061905983031197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667927345545522,0.0,0.1383770315914583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317522946073512
mentalhealth,kitaisaradish,2020/03/03,"Night shifts ruining my mental health? Hey there, I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this but hey ho.

I'm going through a rough patch at the moment, a very tough patch. Without going into depth it's an old sexual assault case being resurfaced and doing through the courts.

I'm only young, 18 and wanting to push my career so am starting university in September. I decided to work at my local fuel station on the nightshifts for some good paying money.

I'm starting to see things in the corners of my eyes, things running past the windows at work, normal objects as figures, hearing strange noises that I am DEFINTE are at my night pay window but no one is there, voices, knocking on the window or cars pulling up.

I'm not a delusional person, always level headed and relatively calm. Even this whole situation hasn't broken me down too much.

Most of these could usually be put off, but I live in a tiny village where I would usually get possibly 10 customers a night in an 8 hour shift. I can easily go 5 hours without seeing someone and having only Netflix and cleaning to keep me occupied.

This is doubled with college so while I am tired most of the time, I wouldnt say this is out of the norm. I am used to going without sleep most nights from my younger years.

Im just really confused and wondering if anyone has any ideas, any experiences in the matter or advice. I dont want this to be a regular occurrence, it's really freaking me out.",5.215374351371388,6.153243309859158,6.111304670126021,77.8704633061527,68.36619718309859,8.655003706449223,31.49666419570052,8.841846274778883,2.658742253521127,1156,47,209,19,19,382,178,284,0.106,0.8440000000000001,0.051,-0.9287,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,2,9,8,1,1,18,0,21,6,3,1,1,42,41,17,0,8,13,0,1,0,0,2,2,3,4,1,12,10,0,1,4,1,3,9,9,5,0,1,0,7,18,3,37,35,7,51,0,1,3,1,5,24,0,10,17,139,30,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436890291000847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887056548187824,0.0,0.0,0.14526253283600954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468074901253599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527534111586976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251750159974355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054389325607165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447607759821774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05580136095328639,0.0,0.242799652969566,0.08958321818364802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961305099126643,0.1135290393155299,0.12037733532063075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103634121554886,0.0,0.0,0.12057018316182525,0.11536805173569585,0.0,0.0,0.094933457927126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431103654461462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076346213893147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851418457609746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4009181549355375,0.10464651695536496,0.0,0.0,0.11207419562305942,0.0,0.07237403533142317,0.16246048675696953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019577439927459,0.0,0.09325826816967196,0.11158880600965687,0.0,0.0,0.12040692780661613,0.1022899535588996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107368826186112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684441999907498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121114251048226,0.0,0.08493586130350304,0.0,0.0,0.1702199917272619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005363201492418,0.1068824333752518,0.0,0.09049578397933213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119468193664376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066273113397604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14191339077544532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062279029256761924,0.1227569805005194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224548678748644,0.23526189692442026,0.08812555794451855,0.12599306618057654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924430306214315,0.0,0.3088694931415933,0.11582579169455134,0.15551106069343154,0.0,0.0,0.07587142063035203,0.0,0.0,0.06877911136376491
mentalhealth,WelcomeToMyDomain,2020/03/03,"I am so done with feelings I am falling for this girl really fucking hard but I know that I can never have her, when we had a slow dance on Saturday night the whole world stood still, now all i can do is drink till I'm numb and try not to think about it. Back to my usual way to cope I guess...",5.707179487179487,3.1869596153846165,6.293846153846157,88.52948717948719,68.23076923076923,9.8974358974359,27.82051282051281,7.793537801064563,1.223358974358974,225,4,58,2,3,74,55,65,0.098,0.902,0.0,-0.5975,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,0,6,2,1,0,2,0,9,3,0,0,2,11,16,5,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,3,1,0,3,2,0,2,2,2,0,0,3,2,9,0,8,13,2,15,0,0,0,1,3,2,1,1,10,42,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173907356528904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893160694920736,0.0,0.2769535172207839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294942984209022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613658846250891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114429497996215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532575187341731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15537302166476413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21804758949768094,0.0,0.0,0.2653093049726774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811147612668292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257769293700851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18115264946543025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19194523755276585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113711344381873,0.0,0.0,0.224406370655423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3156417116850722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Merccurii666,2020/03/03,"-tw- self harm and intrusive thoughts. Hey guys. I hadn’t self harmed in 3 or so months and I just relapsed. I’ve been having horrible intrusive thoughts such as murder, suicide, and other things that just aren’t right. The only way I can cope with these thoughts is self harm and cutting myself. I see a therapist and she knows about what I’ve been doing. I’m also on Zoloft. I just want to put an end to myself and have these thoughts all be over. I want to be happy again.",1.7193749999999994,4.024107187500004,2.4123333333333328,94.86600000000004,81.29166666666666,5.506666666666668,21.058333333333334,6.742157984588678,0.29751583333333365,374,11,80,4,10,116,65,96,0.235,0.705,0.061,-0.9638,1,0,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,2,0,3,0,11,1,0,0,1,19,20,10,2,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,6,7,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,7,1,9,1,9,11,1,9,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,1,3,53,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14067428251348768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558030714741399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17417746579483406,0.0,0.1872582933822932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966749301572939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14040880445120554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378664400805065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768370292773039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15022523810201455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401766170400296,0.0,0.5505340360763339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924157837035146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042437892444483,0.1168660556831391,0.0,0.0,0.5586080645279673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20751125186272945,0.1396282956816869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tsimpson35,2020/03/03,"I feel as though my sense of independence will end up driving me away from everyone. There have been times in the past where I would distance myself greatly from anyone who made ""you should"" or ""you need to"" statements. I'm 27 but I feel like I'm acting like an emotionally distant teenager or something. My wife starts MANY sentences throughout the day with these ""trigger phrases"", and I'm worried my need for (seemingly) never-ending space will rip my family apart. I know she does it out of caring, but I think maybe I feel like I'm acting like a teenager because I feel like I'm still living with my mom. I can't communicate this without her becoming irate, which I'm not very good at dealing with. Any suggestions?",5.880600162206001,6.847875583941607,5.850316301703162,80.23115977291162,66.88321167883211,8.424655312246554,32.010543390105425,8.515128840125781,2.4713234387672345,573,23,105,8,9,180,96,137,0.044000000000000004,0.773,0.183,0.963,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,0,4,8,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,3,0,26,25,7,0,4,6,2,4,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,8,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,2,4,19,8,16,19,0,17,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,3,11,61,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026799699220998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309732277377312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13852990206183965,0.0,0.0,0.08988140904073982,0.1628419719592644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15033051528268987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950901504637426,0.15200983750964164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12903055178799402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658563433183004,0.2611858999817213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14089049511136506,0.0,0.0,0.13899849629339614,0.0,0.29821150275551417,0.3160052867267174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367029096939795,0.0,0.16255918568975627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103219147060864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3601721208277713,0.0,0.1301970789572169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395164983943912,0.0,0.14948659581158852,0.14812882405830827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726863890671388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186579418481971,0.11371906031410955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075341477816952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422884669973892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351075042092942,0.0,0.0,0.10436268470394927,0.0,0.11775016778547888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447712363194503,0.1448644563860877,0.0,0.0859766575217911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165798029823954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14213220162912066,0.0,0.0,0.149738063724986,0.0,0.10474105369134797,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ready-Cheesecake,2020/03/03,"Feeling really lost (F 27) Hey all,

Sorry if this is long and rambling- Im not sure where to start on this, I guess lately Ive been feeling really empty. 

Recently I started a new job in a city 2 hours away from my home, I was very excited for this opportunity but I entered into a workplace that is predominately male. Because of this I have found it really hard to make connections, these guys are all bros and while they are polite I feel extremely isolated. 

I came from an office that really was more friendly and diverse..and I felt appreciated and supported so its really hard to walk into this dynamic, more than that I dont feel like Im making the positive impact I thought I would in my position.

I know a lot of the negative things i think my coworkers are thinking about me are probably based on my own thoughts and insecurities. Ive been there for 2 months and I literally go to work and go back to my apartment, its a beach town and i literally cannot  motivate myself to go watch a sunset even though Im 3 minutes from the beach. It all seems so useless without the people I love around me. 

I also have issues with drinking and smoking weed and Im really seeing i use it to quiet my mind. My mind is constanly racing, Im either trying to figure out what people are thinking of me or analyzing all of my actions and motivations and I just feel selfish for how self centric my thinking is. 

I lash out at my bf and lately cant even feel love for him..I feel like I love him when Im away and Im with him I almost feel disgusted. I just feel terrible. I feel like Im using him, I feel like a liar every time I say I love you. But Im just not sure if it is just my mental state thats making me feel this way. I feel.numb

My father recently passed, about 3 weeks ago and there was a lot that was unsaid, he was an alcoholic and very reclusive but always lived in our home. I am afraid I will turn out like him, just watching life go by and pushing people away. 

 In the past I used to hit myself pretty hard when I had a melt down, would threaten suicide and act recklessly; speeding down roads and opening my car door. 

Every time I leave home for work I cry, every time Im at work Im stressed, every time I come home I smoke and drink to soothe myself. I have always felt like I keep everyone at arms length, even my family. I sleep a lot these days because I dont really want to face reality or life. I was thinking about medication but I dont want to be dependent, any thoughts or experiences would be appreciated.

My main issues: Negative self thinking, loud inner dialogue, anxiety especially in social situations, explosive and irrational anger (sober and especially when drunk), inability to maintain relationships, self medication.",4.896290849673207,5.674149838235299,6.441568627450984,75.79428104575166,69.0,9.86797385620915,30.00081699346405,9.994966539143718,2.9137836601307194,2168,81,419,52,36,744,251,544,0.217,0.715,0.068,-0.9979,1,0,4,0,0,1,54.0,1,1,1,7,25,27,3,3,17,0,36,15,3,10,6,107,89,40,1,7,18,2,17,6,2,4,5,3,5,5,21,33,4,1,29,5,0,13,10,10,0,0,17,23,73,17,54,65,12,66,0,2,3,4,25,27,0,12,30,267,94,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04152257304339789,0.05005981184296004,0.046905458649906466,0.0,0.0,0.03745950009928434,0.07795252965444062,0.0,0.0,0.0318541404490309,0.0,0.035833972728835435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04169927726536083,0.0,0.0,0.13202869576654164,0.03601857740722135,0.0,0.057108850545063976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053574725703269516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04035020260452999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051453695743600716,0.030209190360378575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469529186001772,0.09177457970561297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281602240009844,0.0,0.15786549309714387,0.04475950207282591,0.0,0.04582042711776939,0.044158432959201695,0.0,0.3079011446926917,0.13385562808987053,0.08995125866856801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05135979358705172,0.036189983655721375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648546594461243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051601702168221485,0.0463809068769134,0.0,0.0,0.12588359179739045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18794522864182076,0.0,0.04612989698935768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5565709280610613,0.09778167683822077,0.04648341946586189,0.041635288096438905,0.0,0.0,0.025743117299910467,0.0,0.10567954688871996,0.04959887432773871,0.0,0.0,0.06617172610415697,0.1373076993676997,0.0,0.041362310643135385,0.04145366235205517,0.0,0.0,0.05113353490923098,0.11947008306038047,0.1691067982007456,0.0,0.09380212013498247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437669741008886,0.04720568036334788,0.0,0.09459405698413643,0.0,0.03738880718141243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045240258804131434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04471595302111053,0.09742295552293688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04765511535784505,0.05050355763742508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21005712226334589,0.0,0.09250157286539404,0.050290737088421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037250608292443414,0.0,0.0,0.03732697907611419,0.04264316295674195,0.1465991466996361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05265232790532308,0.046875790719043166,0.047749481326184035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05243574146707096,0.06630996361592438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053657309224887366,0.0,0.0,0.051237503685541134,0.05315570339144024,0.08829598969321657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031119718162029974,0.18008662717933302,0.04602198984939792,0.1115618566242206,0.10925569897442504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03180261742055457,0.05095060366353547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136924647603595,0.0,0.07729904869779412,0.05525720565881855,0.03718096913307212,0.03757379646426225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04515397982245261,0.0,0.1023045186944109,0.0,0.0,0.09982555756019236,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,morgiee811,2020/03/03,"I’m Struggling and I Have No Hope Struggling. Severely. Can’t sleep. Can’t self medicate because I’m trying to find a job. Can’t find a job because the prospect of a job makes me feel -darker-. No hobbies. No friends. Moved 16hrs away. Staying with grandparents. Mooching off grandparents. Intense guilt because of mooching off grandparents. No money. Barely scraping by on fiancés pay. No hope of moving forward or getting out of this rut. No mental health care without going into debt. Parents want to pay for it but parents are broke. Always been broke. Can’t let them go several thousands of $$ in debt each month for this. Can’t. 

I know the solution. To stop this hurt. 

Sadness. 
Anger.
Fear.
Trauma.
Anxiety.
No self esteem. 
Body hurts.
Exhausted.

Help me see the light. It’s so dark in here.",0.8681756756756762,2.751584297297299,1.6813175675675682,91.24603040540542,111.43243243243244,4.282432432432431,25.57094594594595,6.158741222570753,1.3391783783783784,628,31,111,9,32,194,97,148,0.36200000000000004,0.517,0.121,-0.9919,10,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,1,0,2,18,1,4,6,0,9,6,2,1,0,17,22,4,0,3,3,2,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,5,5,0,1,4,0,5,5,13,14,0,1,1,3,5,4,21,20,1,16,0,5,1,0,7,9,0,3,3,60,10,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186350755272283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365120459563836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501791417596953,0.0,0.0,0.22387886017088565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598137039258373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248156682958972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775688733592448,0.06189938872350696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22377989705110293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458163037913647,0.0,0.0639595609873368,0.0,0.13914857045163675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13012706840634405,0.0,0.0,0.08205575549577426,0.0,0.0,0.2431819871698611,0.0,0.0,0.2621069546903449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36444981355912737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672790026220959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12518306457959938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171650973729833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332558637994093,0.12337088224177685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771472611842673,0.260226838237034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718665409054375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755313988898848,0.0,0.25542217130106826,0.27660021694520104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250872378654358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13048376543719498,0.0,0.10234886353786088,0.0,0.25596058352246553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311535685052583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220667258549676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180088134424738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shoe-Stir,2020/03/03,"Curious about Grounding Techniques I’ve only had three panic attacks in my life. The first one was over a year ago, but the last two were within the last week or so. I know a little bit about grounding/calming techniques, but not as much as I probably should. I was wondering what methods you guys seem to think work best for you.",3.184895833333332,5.496028531250001,3.504375,88.93645833333336,76.1875,6.1416666666666675,26.291666666666664,7.1686216300943375,1.2873729166666674,262,10,50,3,6,81,50,64,0.064,0.821,0.115,0.6542,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,3,3,3,1,1,5,0,5,1,0,0,0,9,9,6,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,4,0,6,1,9,4,3,11,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,3,6,37,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20014878096252692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568681684145116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369521650278729,0.0,0.2465036705151593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19205644541849146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22356711761692516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240880120884431,0.3680971795665204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15948181125590286,0.0,0.2263004102439677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598127259816567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15300081828820686,0.1717231000005092,0.0,0.2649153458239079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434392850567472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205550293650103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14467680370676358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205635468561178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111472886317034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448590965944316,0.16437745546455326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14540104433312945
mentalhealth,Relax1965,2020/03/03,Is this normal/healthy? So I recently remembered that I used to do this and I’m wondering if it was something that negatively effected my mental health or something. But when I was a little kid I may or may not have been a little shit but my mother was a single mother with a really stressful life so sometimes she’d get extra upset about stuff and at that age I had some pretty bad anger issues. So when I did something wrong and we’d get pissed at each other I wouldn’t want her to be mad. I’d lock myself in my room for a little bit and I’d force myself to smile and just convince myself I was happy instead and not really deal with the emotions. Is this bad? Could it have effected my mental state in a bad way? Like I said this was a really long time ago and I’m just wondering about it. Thanks!,2.458993115318414,4.125242765060246,4.1752495697073995,86.24698795180723,76.16867469879517,7.152495697074013,21.49569707401033,7.957251820313856,0.9624540447504306,633,16,130,10,14,213,93,166,0.23199999999999998,0.6459999999999999,0.122,-0.978,0,0,3,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,2,10,14,4,2,8,0,20,4,2,3,0,31,30,17,0,4,9,2,0,1,0,3,2,1,1,1,12,10,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,10,0,0,9,1,19,4,12,14,5,17,0,0,0,0,8,8,2,8,8,96,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645834189284547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32908449955951163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14343034516942935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489434705318887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13544456749064376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477821505131341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13727877825598034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985392981643016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13964827691978746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13712411246985404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927959051841916,0.06418447375106384,0.3950246974267225,0.0,0.11626506810790745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26479550086134435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287221830342309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365828055709414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25249162118574026,0.0,0.12971955985392464,0.0,0.14882524395826907,0.0,0.1249702110582151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13485724898190324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30342275371472643,0.12993583513117765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15049263098967885,0.0,0.1503959542309562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095487032432155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766073524129093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134680902891896,0.0,0.0,0.07748992989827687,0.1042814473631259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28494687051935136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436408141159894,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sea_of_Pastel,2020/03/03,"Lonely, but socially anxious I'm crying right now, I really don't know what to do. I have tried so hard for 5 years to make friends, and I haven't found people I'm happy and comfortable around. It's hard for me to talk to anyone but my parents and brother, I just wish I could find one friend, anyone who I could feel as comfortable around as my family. I feel so far away from everyone I meet, and I'm always in my head. I know friendships take time, I have given so many people a lot of time and I still feel like I'm performing when I'm around them. I don't even know how to talk to people, so I spend most of the time silent, thinking of what to say. I'm terrible with questions, and I know that's the most important aspect of a conversation, but I can never come up with any. Socializing is so stressful that I feel like I'm going to break, and yet loneliness feels the same.

I have tried putting myself in plenty of social situations to get more practice, I have had a person hired by my parents to help teach me good social skills, and I have read so many self-help books, but it feels like nothing is helping. I'm not making any progress and the loneliness has been slowly eating away at me.

It's gotten to the point where lately I dont want to try to talk to people because I'm so drained. I need help",5.4550122549019635,4.811539672794122,6.188617647058822,82.99069607843138,67.71323529411765,9.312156862745098,28.42745098039216,8.648137234880735,1.8190992156862744,1029,28,222,14,15,339,137,272,0.139,0.6829999999999999,0.177,0.9355,2,2,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,3,18,12,0,1,8,0,18,2,1,3,1,48,50,24,0,5,6,3,8,3,2,0,0,1,0,1,8,15,1,0,14,2,1,3,6,3,0,1,5,9,30,9,36,43,5,27,0,1,0,0,22,13,0,4,13,136,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247978924430673,0.0,0.0,0.11847114630090948,0.0,0.0,0.09840582712479844,0.0,0.12181412191282427,0.0,0.0,0.23263041042269186,0.0,0.0,0.1636793073216964,0.0,0.0,0.053099462837702185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503474726749446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390952947874497,0.0,0.09568266841034878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208845559778584,0.0,0.0,0.08913194565486998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057533183095538475,0.0,0.0,0.0832342270686972,0.0,0.0,0.08211648623668398,0.0,0.26426272313717963,0.1866872266261108,0.0,0.0,0.07961398623045474,0.0,0.0,0.095508049099175,0.13459690915737546,0.0,0.04550967870531215,0.0,0.04950477016885137,0.07306100437834559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272674906463546,0.1560610667926146,0.0,0.08939664996159455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335432583268475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19148635454528184,0.0,0.09826020168791168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766786601933675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405503904835259,0.0,0.0,0.11628885644791255,0.17662513357871845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458854718262225,0.06718209117472207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358127045031545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05902578428682565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19344346234303697,0.0,0.0,0.2415553949790325,0.07605824927045356,0.0,0.0,0.08234402876383888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756633707889315,0.09757948894562724,0.0,0.08713031663520532,0.0,0.05580281090264265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743886837002318,0.0,0.06927077928649925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087133159361634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791163023745572,0.0,0.3551774248649673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956355852881907,0.0,0.09978048130770023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06549343115537411,0.21003930460214304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055814484539662576,0.0,0.0,0.15237792930857075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17741928465520712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051377814653797205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001684571111608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609388743084909
mentalhealth,MistahhDJ,2020/03/03,"Just having a very bad mental health day. First time poster here, many time commenter (hi!)

I am just wondering what tips other people can give me as to what to do when they start to feel down in the dumps about looks and things of that nature. Having a hard time as things romantically have not been going well recently. Not going to go into too many details, but it's just been one rejection after another, or just things going nowhere. My mind has now convinced me that it is because I'm unattractive and that no one wants to be with or around me, even though I know that's not true. 

Any tips or tricks would just be helpful. Thank you in advance.",4.6509886264217,5.8533538188976415,4.500734908136484,87.9279702537183,69.86614173228347,7.219247594050744,24.34733158355205,7.3871296695380915,0.8960313210848643,513,13,104,5,9,157,89,127,0.163,0.75,0.087,-0.8357,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,2,14,8,2,0,3,0,13,1,0,0,1,24,26,10,0,2,12,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,12,5,0,0,3,0,0,5,4,4,1,3,2,3,8,4,16,21,0,20,0,1,1,0,6,5,0,4,10,77,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174486620713878,0.17230636293471174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628177352353866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13720233945306892,0.10016940927369784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597435333243124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085333948091023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308634229382708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977254868525954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576330183851432,0.3735528247583763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472005933376386,0.0,0.0,0.17466702612518467,0.0,0.0,0.11014184031370547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903072931142517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798942954576834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3331942424266117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655983291986693,0.0,0.1659187799871142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22269822058274896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392046137962172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622485450570026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630823980822777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15128598763192494,0.0,0.0,0.3275055010180664,0.0,0.16144592275330807,0.0,0.28745313699013936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558318844759312,0.0969216084044874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14774557107005568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17820063224224747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167299176430516,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,andrewdoubleu,2020/03/03,"Dealing with feelings of loneliness Hello all. 34 year old male in the Eastern United States. I'm not sure if this is the right place to frame this question, so maybe if someone thinks there'd be a better avenue, please let me know. I will try not to be too long winded.

I've never had hoards of friends. I have several amazing friends and a great group of amazing acquaintances. The problem is, they're all somewhere else. I relocated a few states away two years ago for my wife's work and so now my closest friends are eight hours or so away. A couple of my best friends struggle with being very sociable, so sometimes texts and phone calls net a decent conversation, however most of the time I feel like I'm just reaching out and we exchange messages for a few minutes and that's that. I've been able to see a few of my good friends on one or two occasions since I've moved.

I haven't really made any friends since we've moved and it sometimes gives me feelings of anxiety thinking about the loneliness and whatnot. I do have a few acquaintances through work, but our interests very too greatly to see me spending too much time with them outside of work.

I came to think about posting this because I just came back from spending a residency weekend on campus at my school- I'm working on an Online MBA (mainly because of my work schedule, not because of any particular anti-social reasons or anything). I had an amazing time with the whole experience. With what little downtime we had, two of the guys in my group and I went out and had several beers, bonding for 6 hours or so before calling it a night. We exchanged numbers, and I connected on  LinkedIn with several people I met over the weekend.

When I got home and had a chance to wind down, I couldn't help but notice my first feelings were of overwhelming loneliness, missing the connection with the guys I met over the weekend too. Is this a normal feeling? Do other people experience these miniature existential crises? It's frustrating. I just don't really know how to process feeling like this, but I do feel like it would help if I could establish a friend group where I am now.

I'm not really sure what I hope to achieve by putting this all out there, beyond confirming my questions I guess. But any insight, or hell, even the conversation would be appreciated.",5.9729197478010425,6.936468887133183,5.949978983420255,79.61216704288941,66.67494356659142,8.909441893048962,35.14042188837861,9.035553425615538,3.0851512259671527,1859,88,342,31,29,585,219,443,0.077,0.772,0.151,0.9807,1,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,4,0,1,9,23,28,2,2,27,0,29,1,0,3,6,78,58,30,0,10,19,1,7,3,7,3,0,0,1,3,16,26,1,0,16,4,4,6,8,6,0,6,14,9,38,22,51,34,12,51,1,2,2,0,34,21,1,13,24,227,54,8,0.07031999172914494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062334429802373977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346001725325094,0.0,0.053794601198514466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05786736154148284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213589404421627,0.054071733045666835,0.0,0.1285992428145626,0.0,0.059837133649382125,0.0,0.07379649292101287,0.062192318190914614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360914760373025,0.16085467415718765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056144791405917695,0.07780773334068004,0.0,0.0,0.0724968237322733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05874332982544497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046445691333463164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13757289051919794,0.0,0.0,0.2488913048831807,0.1507098484256996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05981414904182626,0.0,0.0,0.3803033582155908,0.0,0.0,0.06745734369367082,0.0,0.05898107275299677,0.056241321239294456,0.1550560782655221,0.07746539883562074,0.13925569501040802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942680163484746,0.0,0.07053668524599938,0.06984361853619023,0.13850205393911938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729205685535875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190695586825441,0.0,0.10306438787663512,0.07047910543728021,0.0,0.06223097983920223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653847644038584,0.0,0.0,0.07064588334122096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14947804509888332,0.051693285042871,0.0,0.05423511271149697,0.0,0.0,0.06599054863092223,0.06889866154661901,0.0,0.08005977666139852,0.0737890022238993,0.0,0.04765064629135874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750205630460708,0.0,0.07346942450965649,0.0771902342214064,0.0,0.0,0.06734711383542791,0.0,0.0,0.06728673516246818,0.0,0.07069101419983229,0.15754896844555566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13514636204396308,0.07230066327564501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060052888714782676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07116758583507916,0.11207185809621582,0.0,0.0,0.2383247245922131,0.0,0.11633884765018528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059581900795106175,0.0,0.139096539795314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351372346240685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255152000360115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517463390965487,0.0,0.0,0.12301245802697415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04774265845860237,0.0,0.20607724207482556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160427153636873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0651873368387675,0.0,0.07850975949390987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559689574293845,0.0,0.0,0.09990660909051488,0.0,0.0,0.0905675382841552
mentalhealth,yessirsiryee,2020/03/03,"Why am I doing this? These past two days I’ve have two close friends cut themselves and try kill themselves, one was today the other yesterday. I’m not sitting on my bed not being able to stop rocking back and forth and repeating “the did this to you” while continually cutting my arm. I can’t stop humming and hyperventilating . Can someone help, before I go crazy",4.18391304347826,6.424021521739135,4.9703623188405786,79.91032608695654,72.91304347826087,6.918840579710146,28.89130434782609,7.793537801064563,1.9134521739130441,291,12,53,4,6,94,54,69,0.19899999999999998,0.725,0.076,-0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,1,4,3,0,2,0,8,1,1,0,0,9,10,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,2,0,1,0,1,3,3,0,3,2,0,6,1,3,7,0,14,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,10,34,10,0,0.24845702275302345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19104811416032305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21141862663841093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16023422533904488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19195727945469304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120385172487945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665355051020861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748808837057534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16836090873573756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371803417158837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21051682910512315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4154423923811151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355082062527294,0.0,0.0,0.1686860093019956,0.0,0.4854128180245909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22419381801684027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mirqued,2020/03/03,"does talking about my mental illness annoy people? i have been struggling with my mental health all my life. i’m diagnosed with ocd and schizophrenia but it is extremely rare that i talk about it/am open about it to anyone unless i’ve known them for a long time & am comfortable with them. i have a hard time even opening up to therapists or doctors which is why i stopped seeing one (even though i would probably benefit if i could stick with it). 
when i first got diagnosed a few years ago, i told some of my close friends. some were understanding, but i felt as though they were all SUPER annoyed by me mentioning it. i just felt like such a burden to them and so since then i have stopped talking about any of my problems even if i want to vent to someone, i just end up talking to myself.... my parents are also very dismissive since i am doing a lot better than when i was in a psychotic episode and now they act like everything went away, even though i struggle with it still. 

lately i have been trying to open up to my new boyfriend, but it’s so hard. i told him briefly about my diagnosis but i never went into detail except some of my past delusions. he also sees the self harm marks on me and ive told him i tried to commit suicide multiple times in the past, but i try not to say anything at all, i just tell him after he digs deep into it and asks me to elaborate. i don’t even know if i should be opening up to him about these things. i feel like such a burden and so annoying everytime i think about bringing something up, like when i have sensory overload i want to tell him because he gets confused what’s going on but i can’t even tell him. the words just won’t come out. 

i don’t know why i’m venting here. i just would like to know if anyone else can relate/how you deal with it?",3.0573954712017297,4.531506749318805,3.974945034294844,89.10444141689374,74.14986376021798,7.0239218265526615,25.461711923329894,7.6298220110432995,1.1868848820821194,1415,47,299,18,29,455,187,367,0.13699999999999998,0.746,0.11699999999999999,-0.7096,1,0,1,0,0,2,33.0,0,1,5,3,34,20,3,3,10,0,27,6,0,0,5,69,52,31,1,11,19,1,5,5,1,4,6,1,0,1,13,21,0,2,9,0,0,6,6,10,0,2,13,8,57,10,51,33,8,48,0,0,2,0,32,20,0,10,27,214,70,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289869995483989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153081122125762,0.0,0.0891044412844417,0.0,0.05592441066901685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500493059863592,0.08426217367418712,0.06767456507687733,0.0,0.07688108583859722,0.0,0.07726496355010362,0.0,0.0,0.05013129793641676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273250365278466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084043924036945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656600584252267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478338885417433,0.0,0.16693893335141505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841737023539366,0.0719667070601026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869899009054896,0.0,0.072838133650308,0.0,0.0,0.32590308702087045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390988206565524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041581818343343686,0.058750581636592615,0.1579220490355125,0.0,0.0,0.06995128884435714,0.0,0.0,0.06353659146150789,0.0,0.04296576914798282,0.0,0.046737542151677226,0.0,0.065772947873038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733753257670718,0.0,0.0,0.08741475855592093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558695762810932,0.0,0.09276763234244167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058086872431039986,0.20088576815060885,0.0,0.0,0.07277771757239881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991549495656994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16575238366731862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342673256348239,0.0794256186627639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05572634862725048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131515957337746,0.0,0.15701025266780536,0.057013220222468124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866607787081722,0.07869030859993098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539866674947957,0.0,0.0,0.13106549274035845,0.0,0.08579178685709724,0.0,0.0,0.1360556401146336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967967979448915,0.0633105478548806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06567508015635706,0.1375086875345119,0.0,0.1719452599868002,0.0,0.08995462308425407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26439797804989057,0.21563794873287828,0.0,0.0,0.09548423068605356,0.05463502935143156,0.05269455478631794,0.2423941714196864,0.0,0.14386027588358885,0.0,0.0,0.2357447484040569,0.0,0.16750186430136418,0.0,0.0,0.08561227649509431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785466006556908,0.09701177360697248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247021988106524,0.148413345552688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683851031741613,0.0,0.0,0.052958339556140925
mentalhealth,venusg,2020/03/03,should i seek professional help? i’ve been self harming for about four years now and have had frequent anxiety attacks for longer but i’ve never been to therapy or been to the doctor about mental health before so i’m not sure if i should talk to my family about seeing a therapist/getting medication or not because i feel like my problems aren’t bad enough if that makes sense,7.502808219178082,7.305567739726031,7.368595890410964,74.73864726027398,63.38356164383562,10.587671232876714,33.31849315068493,10.125756701596842,3.2127013698630136,307,11,56,6,4,98,55,73,0.251,0.725,0.024,-0.9481,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,2,0,8,3,0,1,2,15,12,7,0,5,7,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,4,2,5,2,8,6,1,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,4,5,37,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717134927796405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553589364048037,0.0,0.0,0.18741713330309412,0.13683049141565426,0.0,0.19100138281425344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22974727428705774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23193016310078365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116036314611144,0.0,0.1134951791013385,0.1603563300213462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727259314184553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385935505870599,0.0,0.0,0.1504527404606155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966122763995488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14983071883953647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261227421241646,0.22620579402593025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731196147476189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147806667410544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788678581795758,0.0,0.23416374277746746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21155361287163213,0.0,0.0,0.18041476460352826,0.0,0.0,0.256692871336065,0.26061871016763577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454673875020335
mentalhealth,rheatheia,2020/03/03,"Help me. I dont know whats wrong. I dont know what the fuck is going on. If its me or the world. But I want it to stop. What the hell is going on. What the fuck am I doing? What the fuck are we doing? Why are we waste, why?

Why do I live here. Why the fuck cant I be dust around a dying star or a fucking rock on the moon. Why the fuck am I here stuck with imbeciles and the only good thing being my own fucking mom. Why does she have to suffer for all of this bullshit. Why do I. I want to go back to whatever I come from and I want all of us to just cease to exist so all of this stops going on and we can just fucking rest.",-1.865914807302232,-0.17027944137930895,1.0012981744421907,103.07557809330628,91.6896551724138,3.9634888438133866,12.667342799188642,5.0885558068054335,-1.554468559837728,471,6,129,2,17,163,76,145,0.242,0.6829999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.9839,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,4,0,0,0,7,12,9,0,11,0,17,8,0,0,3,25,36,8,1,4,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,2,2,1,0,5,3,11,0,0,1,0,19,1,17,33,5,14,1,1,0,8,7,6,9,3,3,92,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016085968241363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924053170338419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756745778962365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345449784115917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880067616748455,0.0,0.21106866508550426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6659754939865459,0.0,0.0,0.20470298416642468,0.07552709350751527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06035655976736596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897487673630458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951308984338312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546187732166253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848474872501177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15056653276595594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059823179789616376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831537085331054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15933603888639833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5687734455075382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845218328671347,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamjackvane,2020/03/03,"Nightmares often predict my lows When I start having nightmares I know I’m heading down a bad depression hole, and I’m starting to wonder if terrible, hyper-realistic, and nonstop nightmares are actually a form of or symptom of psychosis. When I start feeling this bad I start feeling as if I’m having a psychotic break but I never have hallucinations while awake—are hyper-realistic dreams in any way a form of hallucinations? Because these nightmares really do affect my day-to-day, I can’t really escape the mood they put me in.",6.284387755102043,7.945163561224492,7.570000000000004,65.72500000000001,66.44897959183673,9.681632653061223,35.42857142857143,9.957137785484203,4.017330612244899,431,21,66,10,7,147,62,98,0.11599999999999999,0.7879999999999999,0.096,-0.1927,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,0,5,0,6,2,1,1,1,13,17,10,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,1,0,1,2,5,0,0,0,2,10,0,8,17,2,15,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,5,8,44,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.20127084353768976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025748756430453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34442128883059026,0.12572845762315532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660291617711764,0.0,0.17764334833506776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085730112994761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21167262935789752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334994144123807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15907318552568472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073388300422019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26425884447344306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5839409738355033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21437335593607584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16371213419350975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22366998868956992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,madduxkyle,2020/03/03,Seeking mental help for the first time. Hey guys and gals I’ve had a rough couple of weeks and it’s made me realize that I should have seekd mental help a long time ago. I’m not going to go into details but I would like to know what the best way is to start seeking help. I’m 25 years old and I have a hard time communicating what is going on in my head and making it make sense. If anyone could point me in the direction of some links on how to seek help and how to form my thoughts a little easier I would greatly appreciate it.,4.0225790139064435,4.06456685840708,5.220758533501896,86.3845132743363,70.68141592920355,8.227054361567639,24.10745891276865,7.957251820313856,0.9641742098609352,417,9,95,5,7,139,73,113,0.013000000000000001,0.762,0.225,0.9788,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,7,0,9,1,1,5,0,23,20,9,0,5,3,0,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,3,2,8,3,13,13,3,21,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,2,11,57,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366831595366975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332551002768412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17008606471355014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940244510829016,0.17933116662281515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378595760045552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763301942382301,0.0,0.0,0.17868652776173766,0.0,0.16047817596577446,0.0,0.0,0.14518595801555928,0.0,0.16633409645088926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4345376126810279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907131805175973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918089081735727,0.16244015418441424,0.0,0.14342988460775905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335779739416328,0.21637054490163235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3266637929283018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17006880016419856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532117772695436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471640731045335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12866819893454698,0.28351895961970913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286463441292732,0.13000552871240764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302646278498439,0.0,0.0,0.10436997455985828
mentalhealth,depressedcabbage2,2020/03/03,"I'm getting better and it feels weird I've struggled with moderate-severe depression and social anxiety my whole life. A few months ago I finally decided to do something about it and I'm actually seeing results. I started seeing a therapist, taking antidepressants, and for a while I fell in love (though I had to move overseas so it didn't work out). 

Since basically November I've been so much more confident, or at least *less* self conscious. When I look in the mirror I no longer see a hideous visage staring back at me, and I actually think I'm pretty attractive; wearing nicer clothes and grooming myself better have contributed to this. I'm still very lonely but I have a bit more hope that someday I'll find someone and I've been maintaining closer relationships with my friends, as hard as it is whilst I'm living abroad.

But, all that said, it feels weird to feel good. It's like I feel like I should be hating myself or having suicidal thoughts but I just can't find those thoughts in my brain and it's making me uncomfortable. I don't plan on stopping treatment or anything but I just wanted to know if anyone else has dealt with this. It's as though I don't know how to function like a normal human being with a healthy mind, it's so counterintuitive. Will this feeling ever end or will I always be a little uncomfortable no matter how much better I get? Any advice would be really appreciated.",4.710793650793653,6.506228407407409,5.6383597883597885,77.53833333333338,70.48148148148148,8.402116402116404,29.153439153439155,8.976282227363876,2.5185661375661383,1130,44,202,22,21,371,158,270,0.125,0.69,0.18600000000000005,0.9605,0,2,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,5,14,17,1,1,9,0,21,4,2,4,2,52,50,29,1,6,11,0,6,3,1,4,1,1,0,2,15,13,0,1,14,0,0,2,6,6,0,0,7,12,23,11,22,35,10,23,0,2,5,1,7,9,0,6,15,132,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.21360007826833266,0.0,0.0,0.10694589069150076,0.09701412418286257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106488155683573,0.0,0.0,0.07442461559476958,0.0,0.08372317092794668,0.0,0.0,0.07652470226251827,0.11213671829277656,0.09006180719898421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415448478643395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903788467780469,0.1194828046810162,0.0,0.0,0.12217396349736374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426261757857064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142511951530727,0.0,0.0969335221008941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899695727177772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766869430462696,0.07818570463175167,0.0,0.11988884907910012,0.20005682416946052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455496158396572,0.0,0.1143583209664048,0.0,0.0,0.09179513047025196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803893410340736,0.10805175657568106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870104216133193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202934112959364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730243555660109,0.16040415154184662,0.1096900815306562,0.0966396840829039,0.0,0.0919040900818517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877607960173083,0.0,0.0730536819244467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050567099524834,0.0,0.08735591551986882,0.11631999904234555,0.16090557948372233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072303593456814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134231191411474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011163275128895,0.0,0.0,0.1175002283226645,0.0,0.0,0.1041048273374485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26163437749942386,0.0,0.11417233872730438,0.12363881138528747,0.0,0.0905319215159995,0.0,0.0,0.11156279034548523,0.09273022856089858,0.08425414109556655,0.0,0.0,0.07746392592377215,0.0,0.08740087801230077,0.0914987845939624,0.0,0.11441300609851635,0.0,0.11971227168831047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228709841872786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12707111401191573,0.0,0.07012629971408839,0.2150532932400649,0.1737701531052513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030147892987213,0.06455198966330625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218858151516727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967540347041539,0.0,0.0,0.07774477292665302,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hazard-Gamerman3214,2020/03/03,"I don't really know where to ask this, so... I sometimes have weird dreams. Not weird as in something literally odd or unreal, as in some giant octopus coming out of space or something along those lines. I mean like I have dreams of common things happening, like being in a car ride, or talking with someone, though these dreams are not anything I had done/have experienced in the past. To say, it's more like glimpses into the future or something. I have poor memory, so I might just be wrong, but I swear I remember having dreams in the past and feeling déjà vu of sorts whenever at random at some point about something I did or done around the current time of remembering. I experienced this quite a few times in my life, the most being four times in the span of two days, two each. Thinking logically, it probably is just me overthinking and falsely remembering things, but I thought I'd ask for a actual answer. I thought I'd try writing down my dreams, though as mentioned, I have poor memory, so I might end up forgetting to do so more than forgetting the dream.",10.86316502463054,7.508436665024633,10.058959359605913,68.14045874384236,59.197044334975395,13.89384236453202,40.64593596059113,11.93303328291395,4.5820842364532,845,31,160,19,8,271,117,203,0.07,0.8190000000000001,0.111,0.8047,1,0,4,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,1,11,6,0,0,10,0,17,1,0,0,0,41,27,18,0,0,11,0,1,3,0,2,1,1,0,0,8,9,0,0,11,6,2,3,3,3,0,3,5,4,18,3,30,17,7,32,0,0,0,0,6,19,0,12,13,113,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.1165828619348204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983114174807512,0.10635123511696562,0.2233716173178415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291050986095393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704653215605299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24451307414329865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581257755671714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060406261911212115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564454835805234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06565610965350416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438329465777797,0.17509708053086928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301349244596991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534718749071867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280901322564524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293522391542372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12880596702818034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270681905150164,0.0,0.0,0.07653381840806342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4059995229914211,0.0,0.0,0.09500520058294966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122426472071504,0.3678870898705121,0.11815622511268399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960232990474384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587375455916126,0.07654982885630775,0.23475205250570286,0.18968740023037306,0.2089870489041368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111046196567788,0.0,0.2334044066662873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306187500232232,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Enywa,2020/03/03,"How to support a friend with depression if you can barely support yourself? Hello. My partner is falling deeper and deeper into a depression and I am not strong enough to support him. I barely started to be able to stabilise and support myself after years of anxiety and panic attacks and I don’t know what to do. I feel like I am more of a burden to him than anything else and I feel so helpless seeing him getting worse and worse. He doesn’t want any help from anyone and said he’s giving up. I know I can’t force him to get help but I don’t want to see him die either. “Just be there for him” is not working well, he is pushing me away and that’s firing up my anxieties. I had a panic attack today, the first in months, and I ... I just feel so helpless and useless. I don’t really know what I want from this post, I know there is no magical cure, but maybe someone had similar experiences or... idk 😞",2.66012612612613,4.1754441297297324,4.400540540540543,85.4799099099099,75.27027027027026,6.6630630630630625,25.84684684684685,7.3011,1.2843225225225219,704,25,141,8,15,238,103,185,0.27899999999999997,0.619,0.102,-0.99,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,3,9,18,2,2,5,0,17,0,0,1,0,33,38,18,1,4,9,0,4,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,4,13,0,0,7,0,0,2,8,10,1,1,3,7,26,8,21,33,3,14,0,5,2,0,17,5,0,2,7,103,30,1,0.11586242866271815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879042458262066,0.0,0.1772688815951328,0.0,0.0,0.08101370405662107,0.0,0.0953449066707008,0.0,0.0,0.2636204780942489,0.10885656568654896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19958428006463869,0.0,0.12024690863349514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678819200557807,0.0,0.0,0.11971686078802835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333568748912545,0.0,0.0,0.17575057562499566,0.08277214218705375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855252263215897,0.0,0.0,0.0895150249756351,0.0,0.12106667386175758,0.11114579907217284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15532028731488445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25469984291500297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056604530207276016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163993825605709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924802851665346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718791921617349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096417932545323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742244386283811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021170188743892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18465470976995765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816985981812884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200802334811952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5259172440582168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982403493406398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20501598695186055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417423788608704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434922798132423,0.0,0.236147426423023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461160535985123
mentalhealth,Thy_Introvert,2020/03/03,"How can you find out if you have a certain mental disorder? Hiya! First off, sorry if this isn’t the right place to put this! I couldn’t find a more relevant subreddit, so I thought this would be close enough! 

As much as I’d hate to add onto the list (ADHD, depression, anxiety/social anxiety), but I think there’s something wrong with me... to put it bluntly, anyways. 

I’m not sure if I should go into it more? Just… I believe I may have some sort of personality disorder, but I don’t wanna be like “oh i’m positive i have this, I don’t need a doctor to confirm it, blah blah-!” yeah no, I know it doesn’t work like that. You need to be diagnosed by a professional (i believe so anyways). I don’t even recall how the heck I got diagnosed with my other disorders, one day they were just _there_, so that’s why I’m asking this because I’m not so sure on how to go about it!

How would you go about getting checked for possible disorders? This has been on my mind for a while because I noticed something seemed very off about me, and it’s only got more apparent since then.


Sorry if I sounded... annoying, or really anything bad, in this. If I did, I’m sorry!! Never posted here or anything regarding this, so idk how to do this lmao


EDIT:// oh, if you wish for me to go deeper into it for more information or anything, lemme know and I’ll reply back with my kindofalreadymade explanation (i do that out of habit lol)! 

And, if the ways to do it are somehow different everywhere, I live in the good ol’ state of Wisconsin (US) :3",1.951344490621139,3.985232511400653,3.990086487700777,85.31084690553747,78.93485342019544,7.4918117488487015,25.244187352577786,8.433251757073789,1.7729291025497018,1179,45,244,25,29,402,158,307,0.126,0.767,0.107,0.6301,2,0,2,0,0,0,57.0,1,5,1,2,22,11,2,0,10,2,25,3,0,5,4,57,47,29,0,15,15,0,0,4,0,4,3,1,0,1,21,12,0,0,8,0,1,6,10,5,0,2,6,1,31,6,37,33,7,29,0,1,0,0,10,14,1,15,8,173,52,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152205331746151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334246681152261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366855566601237,0.0,0.08962817161648061,0.0,0.0,0.07372030274392748,0.0800498240218818,0.11688639737047878,0.0,0.0,0.216031739292826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618300560246321,0.0,0.08257514406941632,0.19461784657028267,0.0,0.10016672135697413,0.4395143624066368,0.09812992308682568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906228109656803,0.0,0.0633231123434151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752520935894171,0.08154939609591813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0500896064204152,0.0,0.21794699714295585,0.08041359680186873,0.15335655045410182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946545894373588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537842066696113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367726226401503,0.0,0.08465748184127261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661728191745214,0.0,0.09680424687245907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047757503851595,0.14217700496603738,0.07394305126240064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091518736435708,0.0,0.0,0.06496592346274499,0.07291562160408581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371247346420306,0.10016672135697413,0.0,0.0,0.10808223170710228,0.09181968731581762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927573863292157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06141860181798998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08187488891769379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727904069024606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930701113655736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761520564845818,0.0,0.3219654145568593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18071805051227807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06143145024716939,0.0,0.07611233273715462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153232324288543,0.0,0.0,0.0791051407637838,0.0,0.07609940475475742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651033385050243,0.0,0.11024904449287233,0.0,0.0,0.0697965756666418,0.0,0.0,0.1362106419273017,0.10482190964085876,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,annonnymouse_,2020/03/03,"I need some advice So recently I noticed a pattern in my behaviour which leads me to believe I might be depressed and possibly suffering from APD (sociopathy to be exact).

A couple days ago I was watching a video and the subject of sociopathy came up. The video explained how sociopaths are compulsive liars, have trouble forming social bonds, and shape their personality to fit the person they're interacting with.

While I don't usually jump to conclusions it seems to much of a coincidence for me to have almost the exact personality the video described. Growing I told so many lies my own parents don't even trust me anymore and at work I keep finding myself doing things I could easily get fired for all for my own benefit. I don't seek out these things, but when I see an opportunity to get something beneficial I take it and think about it afterwards. When I meet someone I fake being a social type of person while I'm a (probably autistic) introvert. The only thing I don't recoqnize in myself which fits sociopathy is arrogance. The last couple weeks I'm starting to feel more empty and emotionless, feeling worthless and generally feeling lazy and tired. I procrastinate A LOT and I regularly wake up to find myself cancelling plans to go to the gym or other productive things. 

I've also done some online tests (not the most reliable, I know) which all indicate I have a severe risk of being depressed and a very high risk of being a sociopath. They suggest consoling a professional but I'm too scared to confront my parents about it because I feel like they won't understand (my mom is not the brightest and my dad's autistic).

Is there anything I could do to confirm whether I'm depressed/ a sociopath? Is there a way to bring this to my parents in a way they will take me seriously?

Please, any help or advice would be greatly appreciated.",7.175040143964562,7.878047630813956,7.641013289036543,69.45658914728682,63.97093023255814,10.622148394241416,37.31118493909192,10.504223727775694,4.1898545404208205,1491,72,248,35,21,491,191,344,0.179,0.731,0.09,-0.9852,3,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,4,5,12,18,2,3,25,0,28,2,1,2,4,51,53,24,0,4,7,5,5,1,0,4,1,0,0,4,14,14,0,1,12,4,0,6,7,13,0,0,4,7,38,5,34,37,11,31,0,5,2,0,21,11,0,9,13,180,52,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19031908360746705,0.08632234063449976,0.0,0.09751295939591252,0.0,0.0,0.07787551422183946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622238847256721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965757399337452,0.0,0.0,0.08013622825203721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0593625260751945,0.0,0.0,0.10971498861576616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113778694958031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15550153659735516,0.21550034812949265,0.0,0.06280265960049111,0.0,0.2516222205453156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965452651514836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431920210072006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969549464920297,0.06956897343369191,0.0,0.0,0.17800885662443586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175505906999954,0.0,0.05534384065196919,0.0,0.0,0.10736284624662032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527240117516649,0.1028883251348314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865566668452833,0.0,0.0,0.05351802592373516,0.07937847527307425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047575415522259135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08278980523671173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872900343312686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330580386052904,0.0,0.11405139709350545,0.0,0.0,0.07158620643734608,0.07220674393649404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086886226436643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406260413762686,0.0,0.0,0.32439007751866444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3401171736407963,0.0,0.10689504521405437,0.0,0.1097823945696957,0.0,0.0,0.10499313954064017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615194455516958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749532381324193,0.0,0.07760001287245608,0.0886519637074767,0.0,0.11001276032681837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985352395118452,0.08251056683108134,0.07496861646464742,0.0,0.0,0.06892674089262915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464367173204004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587823166762549,0.062397783645877614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119250820113687,0.0,0.09305167530255964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137700807672437,0.0,0.0,0.1072513636293966,0.08034948611493528,0.0,0.15459293812410754,0.0781131278625114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07089449476037585,0.0,0.0,0.06917663616151973,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IPutTheSexInDyslexia,2020/03/03,"I can't physically feel love. What the title says. I can feel love in a platonic sense, but never romantically. As soon as someone admits feelings for me, even if we were great friends before, my go-to instinct is to cut them off. I feel absolutely horrible and fucking hate myself for doing so. At this point I can't even help it, but it's just a habit. I've lost too many friends because of this and I feel like I'm just in a cycle of constantly pushing my closest friends away. I've been trying so hard to stop doing this as of recent, but it's so mentally draining to pretend until I admit to them that I physically can not reciprocate their feelings. No matter how close we are. I'm afraid of hurting them by admitting this however. This is why I either enter a relationship against my will with them, or keep them waiting for an answer. The only time I admitted this to someone who had feelings for me, they didn't accept it at all. They threatened to kill themselves if I didn't get into a relationship with them, regardless of what I'd told them. And when I finally ended it, they screamed at me for lying to them/ leading them on, even though I told them everything beforehand. 

I don't know what to do about this. It's getting me seriously down as of late, as I don't want to push anyone else away. Has anyone gone or is going through a similar thing to this?",4.820805860805862,5.552411172161172,6.058333333333334,78.64083333333333,69.14652014652015,8.997069597069597,31.28388278388278,9.150863307647796,2.641489377289377,1082,44,211,20,18,364,150,273,0.212,0.691,0.096,-0.9874,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,2,0,14,2,16,17,4,1,9,0,20,3,0,2,2,44,48,22,1,4,11,0,8,1,3,1,0,2,0,0,20,9,0,3,14,1,0,6,9,9,0,0,9,10,38,8,44,38,2,31,0,2,0,3,32,14,1,4,12,159,58,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652096253971396,0.12104630710525635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219890159142041,0.0,0.0,0.07201580758004515,0.0,0.1005267078263241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766517200617053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098689111492373,0.0,0.10463517270395103,0.0,0.0,0.23408703714798826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617478629527996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41813873694403497,0.08439778654290724,0.0,0.1294143672568961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27381929852209275,0.10921664595266788,0.12344442258065087,0.0,0.13428105718022496,0.0,0.0,0.13024752462098202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582841290904342,0.11663678328425643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918538839408548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646913603162654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500645232657534,0.13070215582560998,0.0,0.06492553655997617,0.0,0.13326477141890594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05771624282719645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12896154539146046,0.0,0.21324825352757892,0.0,0.0,0.1197733550759512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905528342054175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911152823833952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984924667282898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167856347148954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664698919249245,0.25367192725131105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394805230448132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001958305042746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987686294760413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848561523168987,0.0,0.116069951813502,0.0,0.06888719803734157,0.0,0.0,0.22577177848198635,0.0,0.08020792416030878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968083321859828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066011391644918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gimmeurcookies123456,2020/03/04,"Well my dog is dead and I can't deal with this. He tried to to be happy but since he had spinal cancer he couldn't. I loved him. He was a 9 year old Carin terrier. They are the cutest things ever. Look them up. My grandma called him a little black angel on assignment. He was there to make us happy after our old dogs died. We had him for one year. 

I'm probably in the wrong place so please tell me if I am",-0.8730847803881508,1.154852539325848,1.221634320735447,100.71486210418794,91.02247191011236,4.58467824310521,12.585291113381002,6.1124844417494595,-1.1528741573033707,312,4,78,3,11,103,69,89,0.201,0.639,0.16,-0.7565,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,3,0,2,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,10,3,1,1,1,8,14,4,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,4,2,14,4,9,8,0,11,1,0,2,1,17,5,0,1,6,47,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19548002268607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19736459667538184,0.0,0.0,0.19868284736404604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17316700365363674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4075794985811241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19187158143699745,0.0,0.0,0.16076005103164104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727806410284602,0.0,0.1277866265120929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4017648198431514,0.0,0.12972362239407587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20001239488600808,0.2101418884315088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064029868853284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583598326248873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673256100231784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718317441686025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997411535835152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23027683837117935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721261231610728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20930785094857407,0.0,0.24656012146608275
mentalhealth,mkb212,2020/03/04,"This amazing story I wanted to share this woman’s story. She has endured a lot in her past and attempted suicide, and now she speaks in front of crowds for mental health events and she’s so inspiring. Especially to young people. Check her out ❤️


https://youtu.be/48QfQxtn0q4",3.697551020408163,6.971757530612247,3.2746938775510226,84.05244897959186,85.93877551020408,6.06530612244898,21.285714285714285,7.447530270364453,1.3253999999999997,225,7,36,4,7,67,39,49,0.083,0.7390000000000001,0.17800000000000002,0.6269,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,2,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,3,7,2,1,8,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,1,4,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4411950690711544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3528737267720621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182882591503641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3962268523932206,0.2877540594924745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4540141367494396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448163037015237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LimeQueen,2020/03/04,"Not sure where else to post this Throwaway, for obvious reasons

I’m seriously debating killing myself tonight. I’m exhausted with life and I get nothing but sadness and heartache from it. I’ve got severe mental illness, no treatments have worked, yada yada yada, if you want more details you can look at previous posts. 

I’ve been researching the easiest ways to kill myself and honestly I think I could do it. I’m miserable enough that I could do it. The only things holding me back is that if I survive, my life will be even worse than before. I’ll possibly have brain damage, and I’d be stuck in a psych ward until my parents could find a long term facility they could ship me off to. Ive already had to deal with living in a psych ward for a month a little while back, and it was hell. I never want to go back. 

Please don’t say things like “your family would be so devastated and disappointed”, I know, and I hate myself for it, but I’m still in enough pain that I could do it. 

What triggered this again was that I got dumped a few weeks ago. The only thing I ever looked forward to was hanging out with them, and now I have nothing to live for. The only other reason I have to live other than you know, fucking up my suicide and being worse off than before, is the thought of a relationship and being with someone again. It’s the only thing that brought me joy and I crave it all the time. I know it’s not healthy and I shouldn’t put my happiness in other people, but it’s not like I chose to get so depressed the only thing I enjoyed was a relationship. 

Idek what this post was, other than a complete ramble. I can’t get my thoughts straight and I’m very scattered. I guess comment so I know at least someone saw this.",3.6758723121259145,4.993341181556198,4.611541786743519,85.7710745954334,72.34293948126802,7.2981157171358895,27.17900687209045,7.748469712250963,1.4976584792728889,1358,48,276,17,26,441,173,347,0.226,0.6729999999999999,0.10099999999999999,-0.9952,1,0,0,0,0,3,33.0,0,4,2,2,13,21,6,1,17,0,33,7,1,3,5,53,61,23,3,11,8,1,0,2,0,3,5,1,0,0,30,18,0,1,10,0,0,5,8,14,0,0,14,4,39,7,34,34,7,40,1,5,3,1,12,14,2,3,21,195,69,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330320344186887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125483790138557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19075964569503387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073293347465274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923138045823717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670304063069492,0.0,0.0,0.33012197911149704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525383862152126,0.07122418401985274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908019004424103,0.0,0.0,0.17088992620629434,0.0,0.054618578714991824,0.07480141845470607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795650311697548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558077860078584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644923076430739,0.12961253844754692,0.0,0.04699688146482313,0.0,0.13227582335200866,0.0,0.091096716670965,0.0,0.0,0.08802925494947683,0.0,0.08164316238725161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18297722265587374,0.0,0.18178574460604371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681837480646907,0.08080018074639217,0.0828810694290352,0.21906083725090486,0.07318154974710539,0.13888419380484146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333605886296389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600552755734533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377867758456887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15869416408297365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144624032799503,0.08799220064055532,0.0,0.09182185311508564,0.0,0.0,0.05732957766644211,0.0,0.0,0.09077313229296226,0.0,0.09322501155930987,0.2375938563496602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313026704232399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17004632097797165,0.0,0.17756472500782153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576155372501685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342063354819803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013264288399988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660395009066669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904537672217284,0.0,0.07793807586078921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274690952930675,0.052986948631087605,0.0,0.13129952975908096,0.048219511353110055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823117496397868,0.0975500767691852,0.06563861400590121,0.06633210430925164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020218560027527,0.0,0.16854441391797773,0.05874341447068444,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scotthelms21,2020/03/04,"The air Breathing seems so easy, for some. 

Me tho, I have had difficulty finding my way. Finding it hard to breathe. I don’t know what to do, or where to go. All I know how to do is run, run so far that no one knows who I am. 

I don’t know why I am so obsessed with being a different person. But the moment I get into my car and get on the road, I feel a sense of peace.",0.04571428571428626,1.0530997619047646,2.71619047619048,96.96214285714287,81.14285714285714,5.7523809523809515,20.333333333333336,6.1826913282559595,-0.20776666666666666,276,7,74,2,7,97,58,84,0.10400000000000001,0.807,0.08900000000000001,0.1868,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,5,0,10,2,2,1,1,16,19,8,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,8,0,0,4,3,1,0,1,1,2,11,0,9,17,2,12,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,3,1,52,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26769075765309497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12955030014597452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4683528129672162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677241405444624,0.0,0.14561322364114862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22951884175040185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5632375480893451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17361831392482074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22371756949881325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332490493159239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20337200858508692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23119471716292525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,philipkd,2020/03/04,"We have to stop calling it ""mild depression"" In this post on Medium, I describe how I spent ten years in denial about mental health issues. I then compare my experience with the dysthymia epidemic, which I believe is swept under the label of ""mild depression:""

[Don't Call It ""Low-Grade Depression""](https://medium.com/philosophistry/dont-call-it-low-grade-depression-67182f2659f8?source=friends_link&sk=55099d4b1ce6851a014bdef31599a6bc) (no paywall)",17.275885416666668,17.815780234374994,10.614375000000004,56.95979166666669,43.53125,12.908333333333333,43.20833333333333,11.855464076750405,5.346308333333335,381,14,45,7,3,97,52,64,0.11199999999999999,0.888,0.0,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,4,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,6,0,8,3,0,8,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,27,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289777334609682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380983790652489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6473796694041671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36403924753588895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24767909714657604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20672288608672784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22463564101453493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205753166643636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21297257791415164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20239728465584936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668270598506516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609064132630194
mentalhealth,Offended-Dinosaur,2020/03/04,"I was happy for a few weeks and then the depression came back again, I’m tired, this has been going on for 2 years, the severity is different every time but this one is the worst. I’m starting to think this is never going away, I have a strong relationship with my boyfriend but there is only so much we can do sense we can’t be with each other all the time, he helps me but my moods change so quickly that it’s annoying him, he doesn’t want to admit it but I know it is. I feel like if we do break up I’ll be the reason why. My parents are divorcing and I apparently have limes disease I constantly need help and I I’m getting to the point where I lost the motivation to take a shower and a part of it is because I’m always in pain. I’m not book smart and I have bad study habits that don’t think I’ll ever be able to fix, I wish I could just reset or just clean my brain from all of this but it’s just consuming me. 

If I messed and should post somewhere else guess just tell me",2.6304225352112667,3.288569319248829,4.130159624413146,90.74312676056336,74.11737089201878,7.557934272300469,22.65070422535211,7.793537801064563,0.6943104225352115,767,18,183,10,15,256,126,213,0.139,0.725,0.136,-0.419,4,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,3,0,0,3,12,12,1,0,11,0,24,3,1,2,4,43,45,17,0,7,13,1,1,1,0,1,2,0,2,0,12,13,0,0,7,1,0,3,5,7,0,1,4,1,23,4,16,36,7,23,0,2,0,0,13,6,0,4,13,123,35,2,0.15208536188172878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265472043899208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288920383185572,0.11694425561791046,0.12698492456143382,0.0927098249978083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16977756150902346,0.0,0.17394513798999928,0.0,0.0,0.1608861470715338,0.0,0.0,0.16435024687950245,0.0,0.12142778616403282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309908993358692,0.0,0.0,0.15889683344718628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12704780468479135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756991687331216,0.12813847677322854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689892862122842,0.10864981291639922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945832449137732,0.0,0.17286723193185274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16753917236803245,0.0,0.0,0.1618976957389132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20387922449496587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358213751437629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430122568705404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16601913810936833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180024014908953,0.11276936876867877,0.11729760684834856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305697721116144,0.11566777093993202,0.16182954785745002,0.0,0.16887279628052404,0.16469362630758902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437698253114824,0.0,0.1456557364056957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563690817956698,0.0,0.1632827623031639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718131695491825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764680191894932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11434926487824132,0.0,0.13292930971830366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19490031791210166,0.0,0.0,0.1773643951026369,0.17479975082251986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970388683369762,0.0,0.12199370365391125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372333837334557,0.0,0.1748906605225095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793798673737808
mentalhealth,stonkingtwat,2020/03/04,"I don't know how to help my partner My partner has sensory issues and a history of anxiety, depression and at one point an eating disorder.

Last year while pregnant she started getting really bad hallucinations associated to her panic attacks. She was told she isn't psychotic by the MH team and until recently has been ok, but in the last few weeks has been getting worse again.

We've been trying to eat more healthily, exercise and lose weight but it's been really teiggering for her and today was refusing to eat because she felt fat. Later this evening she had a really bad panic attack that she said was similar to the ones she had while pregnant.

I don't know what to do for her - we don't have money for private therapy, her GP will probably insist on referring her for CBT which in the past has been as much use as a chocolate teapot. She refuses to try medication due to fear of the side effects.

I'm really worried about her declining to a point like she was at last year, especially now with a baby to look after. Can anyone help? I've not admitted this as she's already really insecure about whether I want to be with her (I do) but i'm really struggling to cope myself now.",6.128961038961037,6.510871225108229,7.395649350649354,71.42775974025976,66.18614718614718,11.44848484848485,33.81601731601732,11.20814326018867,4.0403367965367964,947,40,172,28,14,324,132,231,0.213,0.742,0.045,-0.9923,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,0,3,7,13,2,5,11,1,25,7,1,3,0,24,39,16,0,1,5,0,2,1,2,1,3,1,0,2,6,8,5,2,6,2,1,0,5,11,0,2,14,4,25,2,33,23,3,27,0,2,1,0,28,8,0,0,20,122,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212732911862138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840703627329921,0.0,0.0,0.07684204272173181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500457950408462,0.0,0.0,0.18351762723024434,0.06699175970411296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465351543853794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259506718285094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3373540276775517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072585464540941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366388171197608,0.0,0.0,0.1055176745512006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483255374376175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732233629338146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470317710286135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079225631267435,0.2687404374151832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368977729238365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922852073588602,0.1229458405880084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070895271435144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078641959584097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893714346512002,0.0,0.0,0.25787924083363195,0.0,0.0,0.10490844592877403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077750354980568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184867902315581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4224142730290937,0.0,0.10850933055921187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045365398791096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778516125169023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11488746564977015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567598768659466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416883516865444,0.1050106166984538,0.0,0.14922473724232732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949151117300809,0.0,0.0,0.06481968045382545,0.0,0.08815217676002292,0.1338240776651068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160501922123456,0.11199371045386684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153921816959833
mentalhealth,PotaterHaterNater,2020/03/04,"I wanna be alone cause I feel like people can hear my thoughts Hey don’t really know where to post this but just feel like ranting. 

I sometimes get this feeling like people can hear my thoughts. And I don’t even get why they’d wanna listen kuz it’s all disorganized trash anyways but still it’s my personal thoughts and would rather keep them to myself. And I know it’s just a feeling but sometimes I swear people will say what I’m thinking. And I feel like theyre using it against me and talking about it.

Like today at work this guys came up and told me said “you know all those faces you make? I think they’re hilarious!” And I’m like what no I don’t and he’s like “oh you know!” Which didn’t make me mad or anything but just stressed out I wish I could just be normal. Idk I just wanna be alone live alone and talk to myself all day.

Anyone else feel the same?",-0.2021589460263513,2.104108165745856,1.0111878453038692,100.21213238419041,94.41436464088396,3.668593285167871,16.353803654908624,5.369823440869387,-0.8655059073523161,682,17,155,4,26,213,96,181,0.11800000000000001,0.708,0.174,0.9148,0,3,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,2,1,11,9,1,1,2,0,13,1,1,4,3,53,43,14,0,8,11,0,6,7,0,2,0,5,0,2,12,11,0,1,15,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,7,11,25,7,11,29,4,9,0,0,0,0,17,4,0,1,10,91,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3253066938459828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732072839702388,0.107275485390171,0.08615754259155435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197466332538216,0.0,0.10755369817485523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359284280451633,0.0,0.0,0.06752155594813193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08746175402825887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06915204914584562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176307625366614,0.29918512125689656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940077948461148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366749195377507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23600453629405346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306040317808308,0.0,0.0,0.23015715605870946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35805111932579803,0.0,0.09245026228499953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977347129997122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258182174849168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177532553339148,0.0914182652255381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027175378532824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707222709384768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09959178451189013,0.08326006099187112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20709802093122195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361196720432879,0.0,0.11993121840187727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16830459145970642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13417251645984785,0.0,0.24935557867878544,0.0,0.0,0.09924147285694146,0.10004343669483792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042546620804326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447367061823764,0.0,0.12039754618672713,0.0,0.0,0.07622139929787038,0.0,0.0,0.07437446341599037,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lupidududu,2020/03/04,"Having breakup problems So basically I got into a relationship with a girl early December 2019. We had it great together and it felt like a perfect match. However (long story short) later in January she had to move away for the next 12 months which sucked. 
We decided to try long distance since we were so great together. She came home for a weekend early February, and it was one of the greatest weekend of my life.
About 15 days went by, and she told me she could hardly ever visit in the future, and she suggested to breakup. I agreed because I thought it would be hard not seeing her for a while, and that I would eventually lose interest anyways. 
At first I thought the next week would be hard (which it was) and I would then move on. But it's been a month now, and I still think about her all the time, even though we only dated for about 2.5 months.
I have great friends to talk about it with. I love em to death, but I get so annoyed every time they say ""you'll find someone else, life moves on"", even though I say it to myself all the time. They're probably right, but I feel like I won't find anyone like her, at least not before she comes home. 
I desperately want to move on, but at the same time I don't want to forget her. The despair is eating me up, and because it was the circumstances (not our relationship) that broke us up, I can't find closure. I need some advice. Can you help me?",3.9053571428571416,4.975238821428576,4.620000000000001,86.87500000000001,71.5,7.885714285714287,26.142857142857146,8.238735603445708,1.4486928571428566,1090,34,231,16,20,350,153,280,0.087,0.782,0.13,0.8537,1,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,6,2,1,3,15,16,2,0,15,0,22,4,0,0,4,49,39,19,1,9,7,0,5,3,1,6,2,2,2,1,13,17,1,0,9,2,0,8,6,6,0,2,14,8,41,10,33,16,6,48,0,3,1,1,31,14,1,1,29,159,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730227266990126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06246879033601165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393811957812276,0.0,0.0,0.10892199225758402,0.0,0.0760219850299457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021814622875137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695872730295097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133093167162717,0.0,0.0,0.05761707978949046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141739459961047,0.07463232725629153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801680447955328,0.08081338423897155,0.07527302621551794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04517312220196705,0.0638247029457113,0.08578066452700239,0.0,0.2449661501744558,0.07599278350599288,0.0,0.0,0.06902406688154362,0.0,0.04667660091718975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714535710612562,0.2954938716593753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400939868382159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05988289620988901,0.0,0.17923113968841412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620734211242007,0.130941421729665,0.0,0.0,0.15812664575331092,0.0,0.09994890383366836,0.0,0.0,0.08063307695972556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139316407596351,0.3798182504328629,0.0,0.06624467424140346,0.0,0.0,0.19002877008247546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060539275498306185,0.06794729712341231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632391584599173,0.08548656764223025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918360192331568,0.0,0.07629609789852201,0.0,0.1420939286746161,0.0,0.0,0.07119262403503092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390319016855885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569771635189351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134725078712217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180832060890759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05724563421170429,0.17555271290565294,0.1418523815192347,0.20838010718494185,0.0,0.0,0.08536845150442343,0.0,0.0606561752756544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746533824566087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053904056814495,0.0,0.07166337141278957,0.0,0.0,0.08281932042963062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538590429540131,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LilyPiccadilly,2020/03/04,"Any artists here(probably lol)? Please help me draw again Art is the love of my life and not being able to create because of my mental health is the worst pain ever. I have chronic migraines, sleep apnea, depression, anxiety, ADHD, and mood issues. I’m constantly exhausted and on the brink of a mental break down, if I’m being honest. I’m a graphic design student in college and an aspiring cartoonist. My work has been so half-assed because I’m exhausted it’s embarrassing.

How can I make my mind calm down and let me draw? It’s not like I have art block because I know what I want to draw. I want to draw comics and have a story and all that but when I’m ready to draw I sort of freeze up. I get anxious and depressed and feel like a failure before I even start so I give up. It’s driving me crazy and I just want to create without these horrible thoughts and emotions. Idk if it’s my ADHD giving me a hard time or what... like I can’t get comfortable or something is distracting me from drawing(thoughts or what’s going on around me) Any advice is welcome...

Antidepressants seem to not work on me and vyvanse is very helpful but gives me migraines and burns me out afterwards. I’m seeing doctors about my issues but I need to figure something out in the mean time...",3.1145454545454534,5.125292589641436,4.091417964505613,86.0499918507787,75.29482071713147,6.79471206084752,26.54853314016661,7.686295010490155,1.5480581673306777,1004,38,194,14,22,324,135,251,0.16699999999999998,0.696,0.13699999999999998,-0.7158,0,0,2,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,2,10,17,0,2,10,1,15,11,1,2,2,46,40,25,0,6,13,0,3,3,0,0,9,0,0,0,9,16,0,1,6,4,0,2,5,8,0,0,2,4,28,8,26,35,2,24,0,2,1,1,7,13,0,7,11,122,37,5,0.1170039745745464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28123208024083585,0.11433492980113336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591334298958823,0.0,0.08950772029556645,0.13218118741196153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415834365447674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21397361072704385,0.0,0.09956176461301146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643973009160414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015507037069068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975852585996072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316137230919288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728002171572257,0.10583679360663864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059160725120969114,0.0835876628145555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225949510847813,0.3367226217887671,0.0664960551083669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481257929606314,0.0,0.0,0.12436975362022773,0.0,0.0,0.15685059563877118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24424350173778145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06430232450788684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196444912642849,0.08264336746061647,0.17148669563425215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560065519368836,0.0,0.07810106157926215,0.0,0.0,0.12745162920219266,0.0,0.0,0.2358249734852533,0.0,0.11814066023644765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675696459504756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450047834089545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12843522844871838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323701918025848,0.10651602409070544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708847344568432,0.0,0.0,0.18015075184898074,0.0,0.0,0.08281601542001611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857761726828094,0.13645191699091375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654053267149958,0.20703592701755366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278765619329326,0.0,0.17036057400176274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,waitforlee,2020/03/04,"If you're having a panic attack: I discovered this YouTuber last year and he followed the techniques of a Dr that he was influenced by. 

He does a really good job of explaining and has an incredibly soothing voice. Sadly he passed away in 2017 but his videos still help me when I'm in a bad way. 

I highly recommend watching if you need the help. Follow the techniques; it will be hard at first (it still is for me sometimes) but if you persist you will see change. I promise you. I'll link my favourite video he has made but there are lots relating to specific anxiety issues (anxiety and insomnia/ agoraphobia, etc) that he talks about.
It might not help everyone, but it is still helping me. 

Drop me a message if anyone does need someone to talk too! 

[If you're having a panic attack - then this is just the video for you. ](https://youtu.be/YLO4ZEsQtqo)",5.136416666666669,6.822520475000005,5.466249999999999,79.62041666666667,69.25,8.833333333333334,29.583333333333336,9.2995712137729,2.641270833333334,676,26,123,14,12,215,99,160,0.145,0.722,0.133,-0.294,2,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,5,0,2,8,8,2,2,11,0,13,2,0,2,0,22,21,14,0,7,11,0,1,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,8,3,0,0,2,3,0,3,1,6,0,1,2,4,14,2,12,15,2,18,0,1,2,0,20,5,0,7,8,82,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21266765535938031,0.0,0.0,0.0971913081341027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31626277819627263,0.13059410307504513,0.0,0.11605832968785565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14704247424270836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24327786173571586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15502058856313305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281946761684885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823244852304055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658573698383733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451577035733626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3726723047584084,0.14686003797313307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14507880627452305,0.13793502475566422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330270832552015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11817194929471818,0.0,0.13152418142801464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14745593591809994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061319424246294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261706725836653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904629617687752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107641787562391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777337187788592,0.0,0.13747353046502858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3330142587269612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234442055737864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033090845600073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951077612549567
mentalhealth,IAM-V,2020/03/04,"Are Psychopaths able of being insucure or depressed? Are they capable of falling in love?

I recently heard some theories that Psychopaths could acctually be the ""Alphas"" of humans.

And the thought of people being born, And literally not being able to feeling insucre or depressed makes me feel weird.",6.5548,9.934140880000003,6.9540000000000015,63.017,70.2,9.6,38.0,9.888512548439397,5.110200000000002,244,14,31,7,5,79,38,50,0.16899999999999998,0.6940000000000001,0.13699999999999998,-0.2406,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,7,1,0,1,0,11,13,4,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,3,3,1,6,6,1,4,0,2,0,1,4,1,0,3,2,25,4,0,0.5779910172387571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307393978540133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4978228162092074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922496250028264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608297296669667,0.0,0.19290674609033695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20035309774863533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853482000836981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294301527322203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,parallxlistic,2020/03/04,"Have my second appointment with my psychiatrist tomorrow- what should I be prepared to talk about? As the title says, I have my second appointment with the psychiatrist tomorrow after being put on Ritalin (it's been a month). Obviously he's going to ask about how the medication has been working, but how do I bring up my other symptoms?

In the past week, I've had a manic episode, the crash the follows, and anxiety through the roof about schoolwork to the point where I missed my first class today (which I NEVER miss) because of how long and intense it was. Any advice?",7.6652201257861625,7.8188976603773614,7.775471698113207,70.78257861635221,62.96226415094339,10.840251572327047,35.59119496855346,10.504223727775694,3.8229232704402527,456,19,78,10,6,148,74,106,0.087,0.885,0.027999999999999997,-0.7929,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,7,2,0,0,10,0,11,3,0,3,2,11,17,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,0,3,4,1,10,0,15,10,0,19,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,0,10,62,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559981465043775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815143268591194,0.0,0.20040953830427874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24491050374506265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15969703467478585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22283511219461827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888596938138954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318389143136133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639114353544524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20910529908800546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20205064553377114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500840073639197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24765028710277995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633564187188514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20833239077158647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722914915482803,0.0,0.21056493052568806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483209002933435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21013989318807125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907203304262701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kabrrina,2020/03/04,"Mental disorder Diagnosis/Language aspect Hi. My mental health has been challenged a lot during the last 4-5 years and I feel like I’ve reached a point where I need to seek medical help. 

Without going into much detail (that would be quite a long story), I suspect having social anxiety, depression, problems with distinguishing reality from the dream, a few other things(disorders). I am aware though that I’m not a doctor and my understanding of those diseases is based purely on online resources and observations. 

However, I do feel an urgent need for help. As a foreign student, I have access to free medical care, but it’s rather limited and doctors tend to be quite impatient. Unfortunately, I cannot afford private treatments at this point. 
 
So, it would help me a lot if you could advise me on these questions:
1) Which doctor do you recommend visiting for diagnostic purposes? (Psychologist, psychiatrist (free))?
2) Do you think that language aspect can have a negative impact on diagnosis/treatment? Due to my social anxiety, I don’t communicate with locals much, so even though my knowledge of language is quite decent, I never had a chance to practice speaking. Should I seek online medical help in my home country? Thank you in advance. Stay healthy 🤛🏻",6.2286936936936925,8.630358265765768,6.919999999999997,67.41666666666667,67.69369369369369,9.618018018018018,34.405405405405396,9.994966539143718,4.1213675675675665,1013,49,149,26,18,333,144,222,0.125,0.736,0.139,0.5042,2,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,4,0,6,7,8,0,0,12,0,21,7,0,0,2,32,32,11,0,9,5,0,2,1,0,3,7,1,1,0,10,7,0,1,8,1,2,3,6,2,0,0,2,3,21,8,21,24,5,20,0,1,0,0,15,11,0,4,6,106,31,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16636959037368185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086633480191713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681899056513766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365646869487504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492479037583113,0.33389595040436776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718208748611758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099630911398952,0.07768293716357706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179869967257313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11558413562733715,0.0,0.0,0.2915409895383397,0.0,0.10907376548242084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863654014754296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05312422811685285,0.0,0.0,0.09623031302151222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18489148022625806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286283509734021,0.21916603455584466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987088789664486,0.16125671186887575,0.0838659761821172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20558640656443525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404823455472872,0.0,0.0,0.12181221144923668,0.3469709241847027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216907879265214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590096838547635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011197019196733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967535766111636,0.21367040873100834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320080431777177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482021046968457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544896816752637,0.0,0.0,0.0700241469858863
mentalhealth,standard156,2020/03/04,"How do I deal with my roommate who is having a psychotic episode? A close friend of mine from high school became my roommate at college a couple of months ago. Within this time he hasn’t demonstrated any sure signs of schizophrenia or psychosis. Last night after smoking weed with my roommates (something he does daily and usually handles well) he decided he was going to bed very suddenly. After a few minutes he came out of his room claiming that he knows me and another roommate have cameras in his room and are monitoring him. He didn’t seem angry or confused, just casually explaining that he knows what we are doing. Obviously we are not monitoring him. My other roommate let him search his phone and he didn’t find any evidence of his delusion. Me and my other roommate figured that he was just extremely high and paranoid and he would be better after he had a night of sleep. This morning I go into the common area to talk to my other roommate. He knows that my friend is still acting strange. While discussing what actually happened the night before, my friend come out of his room and continues casually accusing us. He went as far as to say that when he finds the camera he will beat the shit out of us. 

If anyone has any experience dealing with psychotic episodes please give me any advice. I am worried about his own health as he is acting very unpredictably and irrational.",6.563259327077134,7.751920143968874,6.559578850995653,74.95984893568323,65.45914396887159,9.315541313801788,34.183794918745704,9.478462496947786,3.314616113527124,1115,49,188,21,17,354,147,257,0.06,0.85,0.09,0.8509,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,4,0,0,2,7,10,1,1,9,0,22,3,2,1,2,42,34,18,0,2,6,0,0,0,3,2,1,1,4,0,13,21,0,0,9,2,0,7,4,2,1,0,7,1,28,8,30,23,2,39,0,0,0,0,42,15,1,5,17,124,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.11305390052496846,0.0,0.0,0.11320829267302362,0.10269495436334136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151307117964672,0.12147991366785328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810057388314374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858069976477793,0.0,0.0,0.10246082780600232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250272340722855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09979541033482857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281869690613879,0.0,0.0,0.23887466455623105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138202329802336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332454438336685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21177149823496505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26851867171502075,0.0,0.0,0.11113487127510273,0.131681628377313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244668952932297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314423502948625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448059627803759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910061007193385,0.09443405769215238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846553461239732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092471192553069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261550511434848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12716964935421712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212939464519597,0.0,0.11724743456631875,0.0,0.1054664331416582,0.0,0.0,0.1189194247888663,0.0,0.0,0.1159347033625868,0.0,0.0,0.08918778835154582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251878790217154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10918823145345373,0.0,0.0,0.0931166752850664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755367139933016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787090666086326,0.0,0.1275935500864427,0.19117847706723104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416399552928132,0.10739507208053478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11765235174775072,0.0,0.08229725284786246,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AccomplishedSoup9,2020/03/04,"Anger outbursts Hello So I will get right into it, I don’t know why, but for the past couple of months I get this anger outburst like I would go from 1 to 100 really quick and I can’t calm myself down. I used to be the calmest person ever and in control of my emotions .
For example I’m talking to my sister and we start arguing and she gets mad I will get twice as mad and I can’t seem to help calm myself down or walk away from the situation. the worst thing to me is how calm I used to be and in control of my emotions. Has this ever happened to you and how did you deal with it ??",0.6248162729658802,2.330261291338584,2.753248031496064,94.1732316272966,81.75590551181102,5.493175853018373,20.03215223097113,6.42735559955562,0.00020262467191622943,452,12,106,4,12,153,75,127,0.182,0.6890000000000001,0.129,-0.8995,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,2,0,2,6,10,5,0,4,0,11,0,0,6,2,23,23,13,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,5,10,0,2,2,0,0,2,3,6,0,1,1,0,19,4,22,17,1,15,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,2,7,78,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16011456165763344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3822795184256336,0.0,0.18856573692607972,0.0,0.0,0.17569483655333454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3833975959456472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083080645248407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3561482450684784,0.0,0.09685322726798762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15070124247561267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11422847837938628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365800180586392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325827188110692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360270758867265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16268452495520666,0.0,0.14880357745467365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917498067583874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553716872153627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551433490622434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19155845675522906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062367233413132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697659460866352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321902417107488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943751520895115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15377692990110556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210609958553386,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw-away-3000,2020/03/04,"Realizing I have no healthy relationships. What do I do? What did you do to change your life? Hello, I know I'm not alone in this, but I've got to get it out. Most of my friends are just drinking buddies. My partner of 12 years is not emotionally available. I don't think they ever actually were. Divorce is not an option. I work, but don't have any money of my own, and the house is in their name. My parents never wanted kids, and that is reflected in the upbringing of my sister and I. I don't know if anyone in my life, besides my dog and my therapist, actually care if I get out of bed. I just feel so alone. I'm afraid to start new relationships because I have the worst judgment of character. I'm too trusting, and put way too much stock in others. And I can't let go of all the toxic people in my life because then I will truly will be alone...",2.032711864406778,3.6166675254237326,4.078666666666667,86.83766101694917,77.13559322033899,6.9798870056497195,24.79435028248588,7.793537801064563,1.2162085875706214,660,23,144,10,15,226,101,177,0.040999999999999995,0.836,0.12300000000000001,0.9285,1,3,1,0,1,0,25.0,0,2,2,1,6,5,0,1,5,0,21,4,0,0,3,30,35,12,0,3,9,2,1,0,2,2,3,0,1,2,6,8,1,0,6,1,1,2,9,2,0,0,3,1,25,3,18,28,5,17,0,0,0,0,14,8,0,4,6,102,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.2888009623490102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4597667734888361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062683862513916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346629006906716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18040615778223504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508685219169235,0.0,0.15653600702109596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495738531547228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16644991417693264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13385021560618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481968739804076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432371408664048,0.0,0.15461976145076672,0.0,0.08409656991589971,0.0,0.11834767201555275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707411858686717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16264438303654985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15131260505998306,0.3135535056212366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087773154835813,0.0,0.11412604095122605,0.14291342217590308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16430670822446095,0.0,0.0,0.10258597349876512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875391933579485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177356421488245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473618050838772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17180827044126962,0.0,0.09481524074144683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727841715903566,0.1174542250438829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077262395423618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528987833077868
mentalhealth,Aurales,2020/03/04,Dealing with self hate How do other people deal with self hate? My self hate has been growing stronger and stronger and it's also making me not care about recovery. It's hard to do anything for yourself when you feel like you don't even deserve any good things. I think atm my self hate is the biggest thing that's holding me back in life.,4.210000000000001,5.543064705882355,3.7698823529411776,92.25747058823532,71.05882352941177,6.028235294117647,28.30588235294117,5.6839178017228535,0.8978905882352937,272,10,56,1,5,81,51,68,0.226,0.626,0.14800000000000002,-0.8190000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,6,7,4,0,1,0,6,1,0,2,0,10,14,5,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,6,4,0,1,2,0,1,1,2,4,0,0,1,2,7,3,6,13,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,3,34,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163782092513534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896362238881408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975665051229135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119015877767616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483748832552006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30006471875284224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961194752388356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358302608007204,0.10396480368148256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206147867061833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036396596038707,0.5747127157190318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279030641975853,0.0710973367969984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714066957964324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089037559393604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6072672664419264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933638763200184,0.09324808182035904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,serhokyan,2020/03/04,"Right level of emotions? Alright, this is my first time posting on reddit but i have high hopes that other People's ideas can help me out on this one...
So, i have been trying to get the golden ratio for my emotional feelings. First off, i dont like being too emotional myself because i have seen what too much of that does to People. Second, i have enough moral knowledge and experience that world without the emotions means nothing, for example, without the emotions ice cream and lemon starts to taste the same, or other stuff like that. So i wanna learn how you People of reddit get the golden ratio for your feelings and emotions.",7.155774818401937,7.607787483050848,6.684285714285719,77.16398305084748,64.0,8.098789346246972,31.26392251815981,7.447530270364453,2.1402092009685227,505,17,84,4,7,157,75,118,0.044000000000000004,0.852,0.10400000000000001,0.7367,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,2,5,4,0,0,5,1,9,1,0,1,0,18,17,8,0,2,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,4,1,0,6,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,2,5,12,4,16,14,3,13,1,0,2,0,3,8,0,2,6,69,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025602491715897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085704884069162,0.0,0.1350734771489958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7778521173532866,0.0,0.11908523567565887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273772939137225,0.0,0.0,0.11654887808155336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960651207662633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204279271473952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725040941749156,0.12176915660902132,0.0,0.11447038637526405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13010450807925358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261177040013885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554227794544626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472284849900727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058657669123932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809715484853529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23970188597376035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037873328406793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842384341197796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157534973287857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319349811346355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672038662679078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824795843741499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221959714641334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hotsaucegoblin,2020/03/04,"Uncomfortable having a body I’m not talking about the identity sense although I also feel uncomfortable existing at all but I feel like that’s a separate feeling, I’m just uncomfortable with being aware of the processes of my body. I’m also really into medical stuff, just on other people, so I’m hyperaware of my own body too and I hate it. I have emetophobia (fear of vomiting, which causes OCD about avoiding it) and that definitely probably manifested this. Cardiac stuff freaks me out the most though, I have no problem looking at injuries or blood but thinking about my own cardiac system really freaks me out, if I think about my veins too much I start to get nauseous. I just hate how my body is a tangle of scary things that could easily betray me and I’m tired of feeling anxious about it all the time.",5.511038961038961,6.979733480519485,6.573896103896107,72.86655844155845,68.0909090909091,10.015584415584417,31.532467532467532,10.230975488527342,3.4763844155844157,652,27,113,17,11,218,90,154,0.262,0.6629999999999999,0.075,-0.9874,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,15,8,2,2,7,0,6,9,6,2,2,29,22,13,0,3,8,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,12,7,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,0,5,16,1,19,20,6,9,0,0,1,0,1,6,0,3,3,86,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194757124086712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15502388130620898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6096990105476857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409666849261254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956207116696147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544149718126074,0.2775379888382642,0.09803273954894468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169379330503205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709602672273671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06704063735066877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523346587347967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13823858329634098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087531243591204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513373337285656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14795051004775714,0.1313046835130962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17581821293881664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971277410658512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3141769352417008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102953255840132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116542259595023,0.17585499312902825,0.13482172722393346,0.0,0.08001632530988241,0.15771861897995093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deepfriedt0es,2020/03/04,CAHMS Ireland Hi everyone. I’m going to my first therapy session with CAHMS in Galway next week and was wondering if anyone had any experience with CAHMS in general? I’ve heard really bad things about CAHMS and now I’m really worried. Any help is greatly appreciated,3.608027210884353,6.7356008571428605,5.6562244897959175,69.056037414966,81.24489795918367,9.797278911564627,28.574829931972786,9.725611199111238,4.027609523809524,218,10,34,8,6,75,38,49,0.115,0.7659999999999999,0.12,0.0697,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,8,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,3,1,1,1,6,5,0,7,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,4,16,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35128870520030003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18060062090215054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21565926835322274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.246804768656872,0.0,0.252654730076316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21969920998059225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14679073476408772,0.0,0.0,0.2847628733613091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17312466239146118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746916794896129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3309311642640202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953742587359797,0.0,0.1715947337651416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20718264758250385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801017688374788,0.0,0.2623034871696751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helpmefindabird,2020/03/04,"how do i cure my anxiety? I’ve been an anxious person my entire life. I’m not diagnosed with anything, and i don’t take meds. (I’m not diagnosing myself with Anxiety Disorder, i just struggle with anxiety, like stress) It used to just be school that stressed me out but as i near the end of my senior year it is ... literally everything. Pair that with a lovely case of terrible chronic tinnitus i developed last year.... not doing so hot! Whenever my family leaves the house or goes to sleep without saying i love you i think they’re going to die, this year i applied for a working visa for a summer job and was SO FUCKING STRESSED throughout the entire process i genuinely think it took a few years off my life. Recently I’ve also developed a thing where I’ll get random twitches in my arm, leg, neck. I think all my friends hate me. I’m a burden on literally everyone who love(d) me because i can’t get it under control. It starts as like a mere agitation, today for example the WiFi in my house didn’t work and i couldn’t get online to open my textbook. So i start getting angry, then heavy breathing, slam the computer shut... cut to maybe 4 minutes later I’m sobbing on the floor. 
I’ve been seeing a therapist for 5 years, fat load of good that did me. Taking mindfulness meditation classes, also not doing much. My family tries to give me advice, practice the meditation at home, ride your bike, do breathing exercises. The problem isn’t that these things don’t work it’s that i just won’t fucking do them! In theory it’d be easy to recognize that I’m getting upset and pull away for a bit but i always try to power through and it never ever works. I can’t get it through my own head. I don’t know how to help myself. I need to get my life in check and i don’t know how. 
This summer I’m going to be starting a job I’ve wanted for a long time, then college. I can’t live like this anymore. I don’t know what to do. Not to mention my parents are really actually starting to hate me. 
TLDR; slightly crippling anxiety. Help.",2.807676377676376,4.654154211302213,4.6881404001404015,82.16271253071255,75.68304668304668,7.796391716391716,27.599087399087402,8.591530228387361,2.1633511969111963,1592,65,311,32,35,543,209,407,0.172,0.752,0.076,-0.9901,4,0,0,0,0,0,55.0,0,2,1,6,13,21,5,5,20,0,28,20,8,5,3,44,67,21,1,4,12,1,1,3,1,1,9,1,1,1,23,12,1,1,6,2,2,5,19,14,0,0,6,3,45,7,44,55,5,44,0,1,1,4,14,16,3,2,26,193,68,12,0.0,0.0,0.07723820963032638,0.0,0.0,0.07734369005197822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265911861373855,0.06585848159485908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24219571001934803,0.08941607615166312,0.07849474634274649,0.0,0.0,0.0651330542621105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436328638022334,0.0,0.0,0.04824862258092736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641043570759653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08877256700350833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606695601528391,0.08214438189054568,0.0,0.09071184957237204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07010270558823778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715949900441178,0.0,0.07563046014095165,0.07113420461025355,0.0,0.14922965847001146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06115048178870236,0.1463443348675348,0.2894653610414611,0.07592713249986396,0.08996463783948222,0.06638660048988965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562869132441652,0.08122992198960069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610409150251678,0.0,0.07939310908971778,0.0,0.0,0.18265511858949915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708675210050418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304950044140515,0.06451716845150253,0.0,0.08380758306418934,0.0,0.0,0.16771627906301395,0.11600491519296012,0.0,0.06989020077442983,0.07004455842945967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214305751325318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951601784643184,0.0,0.08791692721368799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991813721105988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058183774929334436,0.05868813486098184,0.06104474862945498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788582884411072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691100355277155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573510275417675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05070500939766144,0.0,0.07815029430162994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06294262704495662,0.0,0.0801032241046053,0.06307167132031404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920636864511828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240888672998365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719954511558768,0.08274393737226601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902070840166483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189833095174983,0.10516643372044827,0.1521468498090584,0.0,0.0,0.04615253970549462,0.0,0.07502419454192467,0.0,0.08793768240243803,0.1074742335287704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835950306900304,0.0,0.0,0.0466842535835184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629701209836824,0.0,0.2304862644440759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548474748247737
mentalhealth,legallizardfood,2020/03/04,"i dont know if im mentally unstable or not i've never been able to admit that i could possibly have a problem. i've self-harmed for 9 years but i always tell myself im just doing it to prove to myself that i am crazy, like i have something to prove. i also think i do it because if im crazy, then nothing can be blamed on me ever. 

I watched midsommar last night with my boyfriend. i found myself connecting way too closely with dani who i can clearly see is traumatized and very mentally unstable. it made me worried because it made me think that maybe i actually am pretty crazy, and that i wasn't just trying to convince myself of that but that its actually true. i mean, most of the time i don't even have things to be mentally unstable about. my life is okay, i have support, i dont struggle very much with money. but i still find myself really low to the point of thinking about suicide all day every day - or am i doing that to convince myself im crazy? - for weeks; and then really high for weeks. or maybe the high is just my normal self and i don't feel the need to convince myself im crazy during that time. 

should i seek help? I've been to a therapist briefly and am on a few psychiatric drugs. if i seek help, what exactly would i do? like, step by step, what would i do? i dont know how to navigate health insurance or therapists or psychiatrists or even doctors. we never had health insurance growing up and ive been too scared to do it as an adult. i live in boston. i don't have much extra money to be paying a million copays for services. i feel myself getting lower and lower everyday and its giving me panick attacks. i just want to stay in my high.",3.2080148883374697,4.514315293255134,4.820014662756601,83.86540660951952,73.48680351906158,7.944101060230093,26.31186555380104,8.502166056373571,1.7838160613579968,1309,45,266,23,26,442,156,341,0.153,0.7040000000000001,0.14400000000000002,-0.7372,2,0,2,0,0,1,34.0,1,0,0,0,14,13,1,2,9,1,39,5,0,3,9,62,57,25,1,11,17,0,2,2,0,3,5,0,0,2,19,13,0,0,13,0,3,3,10,5,0,1,8,4,46,8,33,42,6,32,0,1,2,0,9,11,0,10,18,189,65,3,0.08206536238336573,0.0,0.16016791123064347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562764064857879,0.06828495562207261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336119705145636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005256641148973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06552251414380449,0.0,0.0,0.10585073927846207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399737580652569,0.0,0.0,0.2885399805671337,0.0,0.09516976633650692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840679575469428,0.07423281860641834,0.06914360725804232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298942601854498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075006254479002,0.0,0.0,0.08998043402561604,0.0,0.0,0.042875764722386064,0.07872457347496993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17446328532833036,0.0,0.0,0.11001336508394782,0.2601196831772276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4432233693046189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020195394252008,0.06689422346045297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05796519241246844,0.08018598155788563,0.0,0.07246521849164866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15530446028918224,0.0,0.0,0.16489137369700246,0.08939323792085671,0.0,0.0,0.24810774990961398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12065496782678338,0.060850426360834674,0.12658773327832995,0.0,0.0,0.07701278333667975,0.08040663100943894,0.07874392852190241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775782933215839,0.09251636553996544,0.0,0.08348997657421951,0.0,0.07852546863160237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051463450929716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216174416396854,0.0,0.06539546878125697,0.0,0.17122414151269488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317792531356713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747075715675788,0.06553750440750605,0.0,0.0,0.08579253506357476,0.0,0.08976618670010406,0.09312680071410052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172874390032814,0.0,0.0,0.19056842182868144,0.0545205802322432,0.1577525116834867,0.0,0.0,0.0957059455158059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05571699414643981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542503709259973,0.04840427697393164,0.06513966483171983,0.1316557671951716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334135904779494,0.0,0.1165937577337377,0.0,0.0,0.052847402756292385
mentalhealth,ImPaulPCG,2020/03/04,"Suddenly feel everything extremely intensely(what is this) Sometimes when I go to bed and try to fall asleep, I suddenly start feeling absolutely everything extremely intensely and I cant control it. Simple, subconscious breaths feel like heavy wind in my brain, the tiniest bit of shaking in my body feels extremely intense, I can't think without my brain shouting, etc. It usually goes away if I spend around 10-15min out of bed with a light on, or somehow fall asleep. I want to know what this is and what is causing it. If anyone here knows, please tell me.",6.588949579831933,8.051569911764709,6.173249299719888,76.75676470588238,65.56862745098039,10.534453781512603,37.12044817927171,10.608840637214634,4.26183305322129,449,23,78,12,7,139,72,102,0.018000000000000002,0.888,0.095,0.6697,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,2,0,5,6,6,2,0,21,15,7,0,3,4,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,7,6,0,1,7,0,1,4,3,1,0,0,0,6,10,1,13,15,2,16,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,4,6,47,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864366710378886,0.0,0.0,0.1637819359896069,0.0,0.0,0.17285603665837615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20085940481391756,0.2043612155013986,0.0,0.4107668824372136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18899898197851855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20635013382487494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20518724742168234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307001957095993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721049223671996,0.1314359345615993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045605398396889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20222209430422344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898837354166878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019556919451304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18196173534699367,0.0,0.13022257133264625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608073459537123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788748062935403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491089995466267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20262888060396056,0.0,0.1085166544084808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735094509899876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Reclaimedbooty,2020/03/04,"Just learned of Complex PTSD, I feel like I finally understand but I don’t want to self diagnose. Anyone know about CPTSD? Hi, first time posting here about myself. So I recently learned about complex PTSD. 
After looking over a lot of medical journals about trauma & the little bits of information I’ve found about CPTS, I feel this explains a lot of why I am, the way I am. But I’m curious to know if anyone else has found information on CPTSD. Or if they’ve actually been diagnosed? If so, what are some of the symptoms, what were your experiences? I can’t find many reliable sources about it. 
I don’t want to self diagnose myself because I have a bad track record of “trying” to find out what my symptoms might be related to and reading horrifically unreliable websites. I just want to see what others have to say. 

My symptoms starting around the age of 12-current: 
1.) Intense general anxiety
2.) frequent nightmares
3.) occasional loss of control over emotions
4.) irritability 
5.) feeling that I deserve nothing 
6.) lack of motivation 
7.) lack of expressing certain emotions especially happiness, love or appreciation (find it hard to express this naturally so I just act how I think people want me to act.) 
8.) lashing out (not frequently but enough where it’s noticeable.) 
9.) occasional times of derealization (more or less just feeling disconnected or like something isn’t real)
10.) never trusting anyone and avoiding people at all costs 
11.) awful time sleeping, can’t stay asleep
12.) negative emotional responses to any stimulus associated with bad memories/events 
13.) constantly feeling like I have to be on high alert 
14.) afraid of people touching me 
15.) completely convincing every part of me that thinks I was abused, that I wasn’t 
16.) either completely avoiding talking about my feelings and my past, or I go on tangent talks 
17.) basic depression 
18.) multiple suicide attempts (haven’t had one in about 5 years, woooo!) 
19.) reacting easily to anything anyone has to say about me, doesn’t even need to be about me.. I just start getting sad or mad if someone says I did something wrong in a stern tone 
20.) frequently day dream and try and find escape routes 
21.) confusion and indecisive 
22.) issues with drugs and alcohol in the past 
23.) obsession with a long term abusive “perpetrator” ex boyfriend 
24.) thinking this boyfriend is constantly watching me because he used to stalk me 
25.) constantly questioning people’s intentions 
26.) my perceptions, feelings or ideas about a lot of things change often but I don’t remember what I felt before (people just remind me that I had a different opinion 2 weeks ago.) 
27.) pretty much don’t have memories of my life up until the age of about 17 (only remember the bad ones.) 
28.) confusion about certain traumatic events, I can’t tell what was real or what wasn’t anymore 

And those are the basic ones that are noticeable :) 

Here’s the backstory: (don’t need to read, just thought someone might help me get some better information or see if my experiences are similar) 

During childhood from about ages 7-12, I was sexually assaulted by an older friend, I was bullied endlessly at school. I moved 3 times after my dad lost everything during stock market crash in 2007. Became homeless for a short period. My parents fought, threw things, threatened to leave often. My older brother had intense anger issues and beat me, threw me down stairs, would frequent kicking me in the stomach until I puked etc. And around this time period my mother started exhibited symptoms of bipolar, or borderline? We’re still unsure but lots of damaging behavior, abuse, negative emotions and suicidal thoughts. 

During teen years, 12-18ish. I was raped 3 times by 3 different people. I was bullied even worse (digital harassment, in the hallways in school, plastered all over social media, people calling my parents home phone and pretending to be me.) I tried to commit suicide or made a plan maybe 20 times. I was in a psych ward. I Self harmed. I drank, smoked, did drugs. Purposely did dumb things for attention. My moms symptoms became worse over this period: she threaten to kill me, choked me, often broke my personal belongings, swore at me, yelled at me, blamed me for everything, called me a slut, said I was worthless, she should have never had me, said I would never amount to anything, told me I was ugly, told me I was never going to get married and told me I deserved to be raped, ripped my award winning art pieces, posted publicly about my issues, talked badly about me to family, cheated on my dad, left us 3-4 times, slapped me a few times, caused bruising a few times from grabbing me.... and the list goes on. Also during this time I started dating an older guy. I was 12, and he was 16. ( we dated in and off since I was a child until I turned 20.) He was controlling, manipulative, cheated on me, stalked me, gas lit me, swore, would sneak me around, lie, forced me to do things, told me what I could and couldn’t wear, made me do and like only what he liked, I could only talk to certain people, only listen to certain music, only eat certain food, and he completely cut me off from family and friends, would build me up, leave and come back, keep tabs on me even when we were broken up, needed to constantly know what I was doing. Etc. I moved out at 16 and in with him. I was severely depressed, and he convinced me i was so mentally messed up and made me believe I deserved nothing, blamed everything on me and turned me into a completely obliterated mess. Told me I needed to go in and get help or he was leaving. So I went in and lied to doctors and told them I had bipolar the day I turned 18 to prove to him I was trying to change. He dumped me, kicked me out on the street and stole all the presents I had just bought for him, except he continued to stalk me. (And now I have a false diagnosis of bipolar!!! Yay!) 

From about 18-20: I entered a new relationship with a heroin addict who hit me, threw things at my face, tossed a chair on top of me, punched the wall, broke my stuff, lied and cheated and stole a lot of money from me. So then I got sucked back into my ex, because he always played hero throughout my entire life. Decided to get back together with him. He goes on a business trip and comes back with a new girlfriend, doesn’t tell me but continues to date me for 3 months. Then he manipulates me into being a part of this psychologically damaging dominance fetish. I get back together with the heroin addict while being stalked and threatened into a dominant relationship with said ex boyfriend. 

And now I’m 24, married to someone who isn’t a piece of crap, away from my abusive brother, mom and ex boyfriend and I’m fine, just have terrible symptoms.. and I want to find some solace in understanding myself. I eventually want to go back and get therapy or treatment but can’t afford it right now.",4.7666615648201045,6.785692608627452,5.470767942128309,77.88762078812108,70.75686274509803,8.622044545973731,30.88844469826766,9.21772538888817,2.9294773653150576,5416,236,952,117,103,1754,529,1275,0.23199999999999998,0.67,0.098,-0.9997,6,2,6,0,4,4,234.0,3,1,1,14,57,68,16,7,44,2,83,34,6,13,14,210,167,79,4,25,37,13,11,5,3,7,21,8,1,6,36,63,4,5,42,6,3,16,24,44,0,4,59,24,148,24,160,90,29,162,0,10,5,4,85,63,3,36,84,612,184,12,0.0,0.17055039628814478,0.035117205531343516,0.07846023880357007,0.0,0.0,0.03189947275293629,0.03845815629567605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02877804083833698,0.029943286428027183,0.03899088322123017,0.0,0.0244717562242601,0.0,0.027529238987628185,0.0,0.0356885038330381,0.10064916527612094,0.03687197322981151,0.05922692574967753,0.09610567419942297,0.0,0.0,0.03381008990626737,0.16602636268233933,0.120187434768406,0.06581030828736552,0.0,0.030621488325374518,0.040543968852236975,0.0,0.03182674752721438,0.03928745947530568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349158571886273,0.0,0.0,0.03696759856594267,0.07613696418327741,0.061997612104306765,0.15092280568004965,0.15555259527240525,0.08072285714357494,0.057463884705468316,0.0,0.0,0.046416065968839765,0.0,0.06198948506508783,0.10957528651018468,0.0,0.07519555124671856,0.0,0.03683325939168413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346481437212219,0.03682272543087957,0.030061737231326456,0.16191790496215752,0.0,0.03718322180211391,0.08026794339450614,0.07130536381965931,0.0,0.03031980936259616,0.0,0.09702585658948663,0.0704025477825532,0.06784891328975054,0.0,0.127369439709889,0.051416899870550266,0.03455226295816638,0.03942097201610587,0.16445304396099455,0.03060972601576825,0.04351448910129305,0.07891371926369996,0.05560548458055879,0.0,0.1316086251422681,0.0,0.08180683350074777,0.0,0.028781341229076007,0.0,0.0,0.035631859172846225,0.0,0.038307832234767136,0.03223644323442761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0482413977077399,0.03802125035198687,0.036096954383330326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04062388384183748,0.0,0.1126802979951599,0.0,0.031986065430118636,0.03981324590505638,0.0,0.05933099579540916,0.0,0.0,0.1143121312742621,0.03909896173606352,0.0,0.050836039752838576,0.08790486101319799,0.036067488074820256,0.0,0.031846532519233146,0.03021922881995476,0.0,0.03928303773211572,0.1529703155033484,0.032478826010510775,0.10215264612003293,0.0,0.03648421870619304,0.0361528362077769,0.0,0.0,0.03625217161275997,0.03626548655741034,0.07635105005834561,0.0,0.08429288194172417,0.028723731419575207,0.0764949778462947,0.02645389623299372,0.10673283619744084,0.11101867816408176,0.06951112598681486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905919421692543,0.08194074036814833,0.0,0.0,0.07315526096172519,0.13684510900272726,0.0,0.0,0.0799165265373869,0.07793879681772553,0.06870553631287045,0.19958563498887544,0.03142164135498466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06892939999910973,0.03661076235104178,0.0,0.0,0.08413156164180137,0.0,0.04031262531891178,0.0,0.07199160082484896,0.08192003398127205,0.0,0.0,0.035531894906167906,0.07727112651715808,0.08153038653021652,0.03073190038580201,0.1026929572700314,0.08585268280555441,0.0,0.07283963204398808,0.05735246468196657,0.0,0.1126239330318261,0.04065400711711123,0.0,0.029768042416454036,0.0,0.03601205077661285,0.03668325845172148,0.09147262084569148,0.055407657407370525,0.0,0.0,0.10188447981793376,0.03835635407185628,0.028738515656554282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04119543148361598,0.11808873340077874,0.0,0.0,0.22441978386525654,0.0,0.1156969342657526,0.06290680880331054,0.0,0.04115319819683317,0.0,0.11953770308877472,0.0691752465685497,0.0,0.057137827207574036,0.2308213840568469,0.0,0.0,0.2063173467571216,0.0,0.09772869584153494,0.1174275056325558,0.0,0.07492551946917933,0.043286801826809385,0.031080403478851895,0.0,0.0,0.12735307066408874,0.028564061060199212,0.028865848349123032,0.0,0.0,0.033359440070558716,0.032471823746945766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733457432552701,0.10225386402426873,0.039345109690112165,0.0,0.04634768825118689
mentalhealth,Trance_Gemini_,2020/03/04,Be very careful who you talk to and what you tell them... A psychiatrist warning you about one of the most dangerous things you may ever do... [https://www.madinamerica.com/2020/03/dangerous-thing-psychiatrist/](https://www.madinamerica.com/2020/03/dangerous-thing-psychiatrist/),24.280952380952378,32.267831857142866,14.178571428571427,10.033095238095257,34.00000000000001,8.019047619047619,27.190476190476193,8.841846274778883,2.5055333333333336,244,5,22,3,3,62,25,28,0.183,0.757,0.06,-0.5994,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,4,1,0,2,2,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,1,3,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,2,1,20,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35220311621065203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124738178844456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340817517426956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27765475122516936,0.3019332268309325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.68849280594222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850274256850628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-ecstasy,2020/03/04,"Does anyone else who has recovered from depression find themselves reminiscing about their sadness and feel like they sometimes miss it? *throwaway because my family know my main account*

Around a year and a half ago I was severely depressed. I felt extremely lonely, I had no motivation to be productive and was filled with this overwhelming sense of self loathing and sadness. As soon as I started feeling better, someone who I had looked up to and had helped me feel comforted for years was murdered. For months I sat at home in pieces, crying all day. The feeling I had was indescribable. The day I found out I regretfully tried to end my life, something that will hang over me for the rest of my life. 

Since then uncontrollable changes have happened in my life and I am currently in a situation where I feel better than I have ever felt in the past 4 years. 

However, sometimes when I go over photos and videos I have of the person I looked up at so dearly, I feel a huge feeling of nostalgia. When they died I felt so comforted, like the sadness I felt was so immense that I no longer cared about anything else. Like I could focus on one source of sadness instead of it coming from 30 different angles, for once I didn’t care at all  (I must say that in no way am I saying their death was on balance a good thing - their death will affect me for the rest of my life) 

I just find it so strange because, although I would never wish how I was feeling upon any human being, I miss the feeling of not having to care about what anyone thought, what my future would hold etc, I was just able to ball my eyes out and not tell myself that I had to hold anything back.

Does anyone else feel the same way?

Thanks for reading and I hope like me you’ll be able to pull through stronger than you’ve ever been.",5.361340475893861,6.223610134670488,5.407482247414976,83.32001121215896,67.9971346704871,8.247215647190734,30.360159461816373,8.321376580360154,2.0897859972592503,1423,53,277,19,23,446,178,349,0.174,0.6779999999999999,0.14800000000000002,-0.9324,3,2,1,0,0,1,30.0,0,1,5,3,19,28,1,2,14,0,32,5,1,3,6,55,64,20,4,7,4,0,14,4,0,6,4,2,1,3,13,14,0,2,20,3,1,5,7,13,0,2,22,19,49,15,50,32,8,47,0,11,3,0,15,20,0,1,24,199,62,2,0.16153315501253654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715946977828761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054924042308217964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16942160672654058,0.16550980641544685,0.13292802305852186,0.07189937748938591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062104512679017676,0.0,0.0984691119991033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286294875598335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470407257335802,0.0,0.08544032973563258,0.06957325496013486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448554010252948,0.0,0.0887182928843298,0.10417552167859052,0.0,0.13912826971544706,0.0,0.08382295605340975,0.08438388320430837,0.0,0.0,0.14135875250419305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20241033529686853,0.0,0.07153521488028013,0.0,0.09007608360006036,0.0,0.14611598665649242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613954123158853,0.0,0.4083800835129287,0.05769965910840333,0.3101943211869144,0.0,0.14763837726161375,0.0,0.0,0.08855638344504098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0459015072633213,0.0677431732679427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142161775307466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05413613441606572,0.0,0.08101546254299499,0.08021943534278679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04438719876896618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22819128897657,0.15783388036860468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13564716704586227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446711160740723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229216367439951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860137691082403,0.05472952317370243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710083715846994,0.0,0.07052226016635257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078843408918221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845764833207174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425715487507816,0.09124324328979874,0.0,0.06681094753196783,0.09078501710398873,0.0,0.0,0.0684332590236106,0.062178057262289435,0.1597604206994773,0.0,0.05716699926222973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059354867148425,0.07435901323586311,0.0,0.0,0.05365772527078667,0.0,0.0,0.06411964082572352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054835204469369056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821749969947954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287757818006484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147485187082748,0.0,0.0,0.1560330836333295
mentalhealth,Good-Reading,2020/03/04,"Sleeping on the floor For the past five or so days I’ve been sleeping on the floor of my bedroom because I don’t have the energy to make my bed. I have a duvet and a pillow but I’m literally just on the carpet. I’ve managed to do pretty much everything else but I can’t get the energy to make my bed so I’m just lying here and I don’t know what to do.
Any advice would be appreciated?",0.4847674418604662,2.0947397441860502,3.6955232558139532,87.71444767441862,81.7906976744186,6.625581395348838,20.05232558139535,7.645422480735847,0.5922837209302325,302,8,70,5,8,110,49,86,0.057999999999999996,0.7909999999999999,0.151,0.7878,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,8,0,10,2,2,2,0,11,16,7,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,7,0,9,13,1,7,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,2,47,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703503146714742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881392367228982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16865021940966052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784237130966524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311150963353916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486454239171021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445441608773567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15204586817914087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36934726090889497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033779594734693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641046078198181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28146410177705483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5537223960429547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19653231824879572,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jurassicpark555,2020/03/04,"Where to get diagnosed for asperges/anxiety? (UK) I’m a 19 year old from the UK and I’m almost certain I have asperges, as my family think so too. 

I have a lot of the traits that are common with asperges, but my main problem is that I can’t follow instructions unless they’re written down. If someone says something, it has no credibility until it’s on paper - this is how I got fired today lmao 

So you see it’s affecting my life, and I want to solve this issue before it plagues me. 

Anyway, what is my best route to get diagnosed? It would certainly help to get an answer, but I’m sure I have it. Please can someone help, thank you.",1.9817441860465088,3.963529596899225,3.878468992248063,86.40281976744188,78.6124031007752,6.7806201550387595,23.92829457364341,7.793537801064563,1.2713922480620157,494,17,101,8,12,167,87,129,0.077,0.677,0.24600000000000002,0.9740000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,2,0,1,6,6,0,0,5,0,11,3,0,2,3,19,24,11,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,11,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,3,13,5,13,21,3,9,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,3,5,68,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18960169899746546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484843143580667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16111867655163645,0.0,0.1987059297200908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3843624441698091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849764515940858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967748933184579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514365193140252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253827967833668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976270203189319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373999589883676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16097437540397105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986857601175082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20784398619990144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811776242889816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057476942399384,0.0,0.0,0.15088347614501374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32086286280985743,0.14576705641222015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178455452119643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17432346641815902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213246512691786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17947695107009892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168060580072003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13450527835896486,0.0,0.0,0.12193199286905873
mentalhealth,atheranil,2020/03/04,"Need help to cope with stress I'm not sure if I'll get anything out of posting here but I'm willing to try.

I'll try to keep it short since I'm on mobile. My backstory is: I'm 26 and I had depression for the last 6-7 years. I've been in therapy for the last 5, a couple of different psychologists. Found my current doctor (who helped me the most) about 4 years ago. I've also had a psychiatrist that worked together, and was on medication for majority of these years. I was diagnosed with major depression, general anxiety disorder and panic attacks. Things have been getting better, I'm off the meds for 2 years now, my therapy sessions are at least 6 months apart because I can manage my mental health now. No anxiety attacks, no panic attacks, just normal amount of sad as I'd like to call it. The source of my issues was university. I failed some classes, put a lot of pressure on myself, turns out didn't quite like what I was studying, and couldn't come clean to my parents in fear of disappointing them. I distanced myself, easily since I was away from home, in every way possible, lied about school, barely left home without an attack, pressure built up, the hole I was in got deeper, and it get impossible to get out of. I got suicidal, self harmed, etc. I came clean before I even attempted suicide, got help, started therapy, family was supportive if not damaged.

For the last 1.5 years, I study something I really love. Something I wanna build on. Something that gives me hope to dream about a future, that makes me happy. I also live with my parents and go to university in my hometown, a familiar place. It's been so much better, so much safer. 

And right now, I'm in an exchange student program. I'm in a different country for this semester. Which is where I need help. I'm overwhelmed with about everything. I feel like I'm lost. Cracking under stress. Feeling trapped and anxious and.. Like I can't breathe. It's not that I don't wanna be here. there's a lot of new things, school related. Some issues with classes and administration. Fair to mention not everyone speaks English so there's a language barrier. I'm so stressed. I'm losing it. and I dont know how to pull myself out of it. I've been feeling too good, too safe for some time and now I'm faced with stress and my old friend depression and i dont know how to cope, how to manage. i still don't know what i expect from writing here. i just. don't know what to do",2.6956918456918486,4.877213916839921,4.156629244629247,84.29970709170709,77.19126819126821,7.352478632478633,26.48930468930469,8.309216665352881,1.907379727419728,1918,76,374,37,45,635,231,481,0.226,0.627,0.147,-0.9937,5,1,3,0,0,1,73.0,0,0,1,8,29,38,4,10,17,0,29,7,2,4,1,68,70,27,2,10,10,2,3,4,1,1,4,1,4,1,20,26,0,3,8,1,1,5,15,24,0,0,20,4,40,14,66,47,13,54,0,10,0,1,16,26,0,9,25,230,60,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059306074727008676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070056959043764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023622626758102,0.0755821139337737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05505602728242661,0.0,0.0,0.3044503737213976,0.06285820878727233,0.0,0.0,0.040783861761881514,0.0,0.056930103169486435,0.0,0.0,0.11834173447226468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831613657388813,0.07651998547190918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05763159543155251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740276483232673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728721221522612,0.06790582590855125,0.0,0.1398002097375107,0.07667741243636356,0.06847875044334202,0.0,0.0,0.15682122711146612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461528731222837,0.044189249018606415,0.0,0.0563692351185105,0.06392933241156118,0.06012871274200455,0.0,0.06307083431869401,0.07528523924367454,0.10148553105129196,0.047796001670173234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335643080822365,0.051689616460237515,0.0,0.1398176437918491,0.06418010525910013,0.03802290259114642,0.05611563175051525,0.16052695167364475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122021040099129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111548225650731,0.0,0.0,0.179376503150963,0.0,0.13421969012814844,0.06645044918585641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396601175808344,0.0,0.059467063964152585,0.0,0.0,0.14707404925980516,0.1636062837844144,0.0,0.0,0.07269104302841475,0.0,0.0,0.13074303256341208,0.0,0.059077174319609425,0.0,0.0,0.07484810354118536,0.07303326889722055,0.11375823083371313,0.060383182422586036,0.0,0.04465872527105382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431490505243628,0.06739841800315599,0.06742317255344392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053401878306940063,0.0,0.09836380425253556,0.09921646054115968,0.0,0.06461599011465,0.0,0.0,0.06555140045764961,0.0,0.0,0.07020415673643199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569941042879052,0.14857723610221654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990010486875535,0.0,0.0,0.07542384564880784,0.06407523062992923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725667634973086,0.0,0.07116029798973325,0.0,0.0,0.04286020995605756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057135376339898736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542018999956476,0.0,0.0,0.0697951283831202,0.0,0.0,0.11068682932162148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154517162216147,0.0,0.0,0.047354768371905116,0.0,0.05342936449988919,0.0,0.30655175315994576,0.0,0.0,0.14636353191427467,0.0759215021237877,0.06305592571741762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295305630678924,0.0,0.08889566303474769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03901207327010208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908464127830713,0.07277199091438011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053105026307592534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06449275912582214,0.0,0.04870667515602567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21541887887441485
mentalhealth,kittykatthrowaway69,2020/03/04,"I’m new to therapy, so I was curious What does it mean when you are a “high priority case”? It’s what my intake worker said to me today.",-0.10200000000000033,1.6239514666666683,4.043333333333333,83.885,84.33333333333334,8.0,20.0,8.841846274778883,1.4129999999999998,104,3,24,3,3,40,26,30,0.0,0.907,0.09300000000000001,0.3774,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,0,2,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,15,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3281313274422847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3961674018715182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084429872366771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36214014437220055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566742430924569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4288011429769056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3554196502062297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Levidittrich,2020/03/04,"Mother and drug use Hey there! For the past 1,5 years I’ve been really depressed. I did not go to school anymore, was staying home and only went out for work. I was smoking hash a lot back and it helped me. I work and follow an education at my job now and it’s been going better with me ever since. Problem is I still really love to smoke my hash since it’s really helping with my mood, but my mom hates it. She thinks it’s a gateway to other drugs. I had a real bad talk with her today but she cried asking me to stop. I don’t want her to be hurt by me smoking but I also don’t want to stop smoking. Any of you have tips?",0.4589309954751109,2.1666496102941224,2.806176470588237,93.57683257918556,82.30882352941177,5.361085972850678,17.81447963800905,6.297961479604792,-0.29597782805429906,481,10,112,4,13,165,86,136,0.18600000000000005,0.748,0.065,-0.9652,1,0,3,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,3,6,8,1,0,5,0,11,3,0,1,1,23,22,9,0,3,4,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,6,9,0,2,1,0,0,4,3,5,0,0,7,0,20,2,15,14,1,16,0,2,0,1,13,2,0,1,9,73,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727594723354925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972702477527152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454373880376202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370979481134396,0.0,0.0,0.11276479323645595,0.12244661943124953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297000023241603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610881322763007,0.0,0.0,0.12630942495994174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3401348695399459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265331546049536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666891423025004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478650805140128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965927994830278,0.0,0.14710190111037158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699185168430888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14552749059823955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124676580661262,0.1323573451998896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717547005769817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153392875302172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399940130835279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14032423876156755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16691979896282272,0.28184322406821744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14841762321641644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426207809829393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563093812213206,0.11711487465883215,0.245211923103318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787171018916645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939673946999398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900704699598146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665850948156102,0.0,0.0,0.1729959320850838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594601367872935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213525884477186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443778803910556
mentalhealth,doritootje,2020/03/04,"no personality/ different personalities? Okay, so I feel like I don´t really have a personality. It´s just that every time i talk to someone I alter my personality. I feel like i don´t have my own? even when I am alone, i alter my personality to fit the YouTuber that i´m watching. When i try to think of things ´i´ like, I think of popular opinions on that matter. I tried those personality tests recently and i just altered my answers to the outcome that was the ´best´. it´s like i´m not my own person. is this normal or? 

I really need answers help",1.4415873015873009,4.100984111111114,4.463015873015877,76.805,87.5185185185185,7.159788359788362,23.455026455026456,8.192908349453996,1.9141804232804245,436,17,83,11,14,156,61,108,0.04,0.7440000000000001,0.21600000000000005,0.9495,1,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,4,1,5,0,0,0,0,15,10,5,0,2,4,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,7,7,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,18,6,7,9,2,6,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,2,8,53,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499688076168434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367877903019514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361815424506491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609085926821737,0.0,0.10982028424156703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181149662018884,0.18623529228287092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736671040897405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.254717612693017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664828585277684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770926225195325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7966783301871871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167003168665733,0.0,0.12869879066755205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104398898803495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476541965512293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659463767597529,0.1670381047978139,0.0,0.0,0.07600452563119077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17698978624046385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lilwatan,2020/03/04,"Hello reddit, i think i might have a mental problem i just have no clue what it is. I would be very thankfull if you read the text and maybe help me figure out whats happening. First off i would like to apologize for my bad english since it isn't my first language. Ok so, ive been having really bad episode of rage or complete craziness this past 2 months, ive isolated myself in order not to hurt anyone but school is starting in a few weeks and i fear of hurting anyone or making a complete fool of myself. My episodes are somewhat concious as in i know whats happening but have little to no control of what i do, the episodes range from screaming into a pillow to punching a stranger and beating him up really bad just for looking at me the wrong way, my personality has also been reported to change by my friends, they say ive been meaner and sadder at times and completely opposite being charismatic and happy at other times, please any sort of help would be appreciated. Also i can not get any type of help since psychological help in my country is very expensive and mostly only for the rich as for most all other things here.",7.882800982800987,6.7293082792792775,8.06739557739558,73.16937346437348,63.05405405405405,10.595249795249797,35.4971334971335,9.573946990214177,3.246201801801804,906,34,167,14,11,297,134,222,0.188,0.6579999999999999,0.155,-0.8254,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,4,6,16,1,1,9,1,25,0,0,2,1,33,33,17,0,5,9,0,0,1,1,4,0,3,1,1,10,9,0,1,3,1,2,0,5,11,0,2,3,4,25,5,30,23,5,22,0,2,1,0,12,12,0,8,9,125,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830892653847906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556921784545767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16008544358107055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28674244970121004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109807022003938,0.0,0.3600707103855519,0.0,0.12839206721197186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881481710805673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19474266095247444,0.0,0.0,0.08844215091300958,0.0,0.059807820213043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202457553912824,0.12185945703787915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069174207189021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450930772619283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06291179036910251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05592610183949062,0.11473279110606648,0.0,0.0,0.09612913603503208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764121305299975,0.0,0.1150042885136346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153626358708364,0.12143858007107207,0.0,0.0,0.09137187125181588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706246064337292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927816665888113,0.0,0.0999540807031697,0.0,0.12565782388135158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953593808699448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114504748455093,0.0,0.14666965695181328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103413672531033,0.0,0.11585356693276287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893877713423528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810251237600187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605128635147812,0.07335016971328695,0.0,0.0,0.1335011519862185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889056982008773,0.0,0.09086395049087699,0.0918239535248209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24395664586928015,0.125159097349848,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,depressd3467,2020/03/04,"Depression Everyday is hell. I have anxiety, depression, ocd, social anxiety and paranoia. Every waking minute I just feel mental torment..forgot the last time I felt happy, have nothing to look forward to, this isn't living it's just existing",4.050000000000002,7.411746380952383,5.401904761904763,68.8014285714286,85.19047619047619,8.514285714285714,30.809523809523807,8.841846274778883,4.201352380952383,196,10,25,6,6,65,34,42,0.34700000000000003,0.579,0.07400000000000001,-0.9136,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,0,4,1,1,0,0,5,7,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,3,3,1,2,6,0,4,1,2,1,0,1,1,1,0,4,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4119558186784661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4638146568621324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226857376874032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13614247391365925,0.0,0.25852523167316616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866249662252373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21947723967639232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23775544889158076,0.0,0.2261048181163129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713438284880471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25835564237440434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744696606772177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700366680275712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Necromuffin,2020/03/04,"Is what I feel valid, I’m so lost, am I being silly? I had an operation on Sunday, the second within 4 weeks of the same surgery on my butt. I just can’t deal with it, they put a band or something in, and I feel it, and I’m constantly on defence of myself, I like I’m being violated over and over by this thing I feel. I couldn’t deal with each surgery before and after, giving my body up, being unconscious letting people do whatever (even though I know it’s for the best to help me get better), but I feel it and I can’t stop crying, I can’t stop being on high alert of my own body. I don’t know what to do, I can’t make it stop or my condition will progress and get worse. I’ve had past history of verbal/emotional & physical abuse, with two instances of spousal rape. And I feel so silly feeling like this. Am I being a sensitive fucking idiot? My GP isn’t taking what I said seriously, so maybe I’m over-reacting. But I’ve finally been able to put what I feel into words. And this is how I feel. And I have to have this band thing in for 10 weeks or more. After each surgery I cried and they told me my hormones would be raised from anaesthetic, I don’t know what is real. Is what I’m feeling real?",2.450434159328285,3.3806065603112856,4.377870161785786,87.76726807290598,74.83657587548637,7.589514642637724,24.032152365349173,8.032893268588372,1.1185844357976658,934,27,211,14,19,320,123,257,0.17,0.732,0.098,-0.9793,0,0,1,0,1,0,35.0,0,0,2,4,7,13,5,0,6,0,30,5,3,2,0,46,56,20,0,2,6,0,9,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,17,16,0,4,12,2,0,2,8,7,0,2,6,10,33,6,29,40,6,25,0,1,0,3,10,12,2,3,13,145,50,0,0.1084848200581592,0.1285367721998651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11754325720853642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231259158494466,0.0,0.11384812566952004,0.09594600741605053,0.0,0.2410043578651528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723355054447793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23833096155836545,0.0,0.22368617185499734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203082090784301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165320050370863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4936786616297808,0.07750157712584092,0.0,0.1188398176776016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029246804266696,0.1133576818691252,0.10406852464369973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271508812312134,0.11462016862137515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17886125994245544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093307858090144,0.0,0.1060004066009868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842399624239745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241445978725472,0.0,0.10898758309929704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356103605876943,0.07520971471560797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21811441573361606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469589511516817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319390664913236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351691456954309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720945015919137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08156708358129715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14414498795073152,0.0,0.10658578489962486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036618945804002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059739057359386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17403995789436882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055529975672973,0.07706450358777046,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sniperspezza,2020/03/04,"The less sleep I get, the less anxious I am... I'm (20M) am pretty new to reddit but I thought this would be a good place to hear others opinions. I am looking to see if anyone has had the same experience as I have with sleep and anxiety, and maybe what causes it. 

I'll start by saying Ive had social anxiety for about 5 years now, the first 3 being the worst and I've gradually been getting better the past 2 years. I have also never done any therapy or anything like it (although I should), and I'd say I'm more self conscious than I care to admit.

But anyways, something that I realized a long time ago was that there are days I find myself going to class (highschool/college) and instead of sitting alone quietly hoping no one would notice me, I was actually talking to people. It was strange becuase I wouldn't even notice it until during or after the fact, where as usually there is a period of building up courage and overcoming fear before engaging with people. It made me feel really good about myself obviously, and like I can do this every day and I'm getting better. Then the next day would come and it would be back to hiding in the shadows. 

Recently I've been losing a lot of sleep over studying and other personal things keeping me up late, while still having morning classes in college. I am usually quite tired and a little hazy, but I'm not only actually talking to my classmates, I am talking to them comfortably and with confidence. Something that is very rare for me and I only usually experience with the poeple Im very close with. 

I have tested this theory and given it a lot of thought and I have come to the conclusion that, the less sleep I get (usually ~5 hours rather than my normal ~8 hours), the less anxious I am. I am curious to know if anyone else has had this experience or seen such a trend in their anxiety. 

The only reason for this that I could think of is maybe it's possible that the part of my brain that causes me to be so anxious and worry when I'm in social situations is simply not well rested enough to work as hard as it normally does, and my rational side takes over? This sounds like a stretch, obviously I'm no expert and I don't know how brain functions work in the least but feel like there could be a slight truth to this idea. Maybe it's all in my head now and there's actually no correlation what so ever, I honestly don't know. 

If anyone has any information about this idea or has had similar experiences I would love to hear more about it.",6.538606060606058,6.0572344161616165,7.388686868686872,74.74303030303035,65.44444444444444,10.484848484848484,32.676767676767675,9.994966539143718,3.0781313131313133,1976,71,378,39,27,664,232,495,0.10099999999999999,0.7609999999999999,0.138,0.978,0,1,2,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,2,8,25,20,0,1,25,0,50,9,7,5,7,86,85,43,0,16,14,0,3,4,0,7,1,6,0,2,31,27,0,1,17,0,0,3,9,3,1,2,15,12,40,17,52,56,15,53,0,1,3,1,16,16,0,11,37,274,71,6,0.0,0.0,0.18592263224101208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056295613993097585,0.0,0.0,0.06577467213153568,0.0,0.05078696726620638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637462774411027,0.0,0.14574931287181808,0.21523637487646602,0.0,0.13321787324659853,0.06507099312223677,0.05226130500377612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04883338824350248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054040250132370925,0.0,0.0,0.11233453965366312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14179086492787926,0.0,0.0,0.06475018293788906,0.13047950198039146,0.0,0.10941226729826066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141122698102073,0.0,0.0,0.1228713536943694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055575887684138126,0.06499027616866487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053052411500466176,0.0,0.0,0.06562027898717715,0.0,0.04194613986589511,0.05744621765134333,0.05350785254166639,0.0,0.0,0.2484902922875052,0.0,0.07146365338371934,0.06422265406757957,0.04536980862117557,0.0,0.0,0.058044752993391575,0.05401949222059007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13272030126023088,0.0,0.03609280595657953,0.10653424488291564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05689029341930715,0.0,0.06517707140598486,0.0,0.1431552558550726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307732983938799,0.125084294354304,0.0,0.0,0.14338459455885572,0.06859905529448239,0.0,0.0,0.05644843118750838,0.0,0.0,0.10470627094665703,0.0,0.07163928608656847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410633020911915,0.06365125223500233,0.0,0.05620218602379104,0.05333034981465862,0.0710487073114458,0.0,0.10798370118122,0.057318046169537076,0.060092382287807826,0.0,0.0,0.19140561924065186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04898094006407826,0.061335990520707026,0.06754100319505374,0.0,0.1244478362075856,0.0,0.1446075402499967,0.0,0.0,0.04303436156622702,0.14490106766830704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877249123707331,0.06062514545952924,0.08805628194016757,0.055452345762891785,0.06635187609164794,0.0,0.0,0.07159522393051868,0.0,0.06461001287607691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754810001680042,0.0,0.0,0.04068456471711993,0.06529634175069693,0.06270604707398544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10100751045691306,0.0,0.0,0.05060729746687676,0.0,0.06625222836178432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138515054204622,0.25421366996524,0.1294759053732045,0.0,0.09778243414321036,0.0,0.0,0.044950972952914905,0.0,0.05071721393849843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047749776315674286,0.15313489666557412,0.0,0.0,0.07262642170338404,0.0,0.04219159634911357,0.040693075701300464,0.0,0.10083580659137427,0.03703176492447794,0.07299258994536087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.279778389822798,0.10480076470638124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710091718379892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246851005035718,0.06449500289895269,0.0,0.2255697179933425,0.0,0.0,0.08179356403378397
mentalhealth,KevinQuila,2020/03/04,"Mother Hey guys, I just need to get something off my chest this isn't really about me but more towards my mom because I'm really worried about her. So my mom is a really good person right, very hard working, kind and independent women;  but she's a very sensitive person, Recently I've noticed that she hasn't really been herself lately, she's become very quiet, emotional and seems like she hasn't been getting enough sleep, she's on medication but I dont know if it's helping her, that plus she's been working 12hour shifts. I know this feels like nothing to worry about but I just want my mom to be happy again because I care alot about her, but i just dont know how. What can I do?",3.3215631131458423,4.869547539568348,4.6187573577501615,84.45513407455856,73.60431654676259,7.644473512099411,24.86657946370177,8.296473431620573,1.5126920863309357,544,17,109,9,11,180,80,139,0.036000000000000004,0.726,0.23800000000000002,0.9842,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,10,6,0,0,3,0,12,3,2,2,0,22,23,11,0,3,9,4,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,4,6,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,3,22,6,11,19,3,7,0,0,0,0,20,4,0,3,5,70,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993486396677624,0.1358216853427787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538624838841286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882631553056718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383358835762396,0.0,0.12707115605056515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218235447153141,0.0878568960734265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850388913930394,0.0,0.0,0.10314974170478187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176947875633234,0.0,0.13091443645655856,0.11016587348340684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243086369494064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806468629411868,0.2027596819199042,0.0,0.13872673268329594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016357668905694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12388935473888922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4320978697935108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09118806969137733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118002572393637,0.14001348056434246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21476268588200464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151364030639797,0.0,0.12142785760800467,0.0,0.0,0.1050241996359944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119563215860382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230687579545808,0.0,0.0,0.09467596861668344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3044139981976937,0.07253675686487113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17906172682789526,0.2497842040402157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,charliejr_115,2020/03/04,"I need advice I've been taking effexor for the past 4-5 months. And I started feeling better, but now I feel like I'm regressing to my old self again I'm getting extremely depressed to the point of crying in the middle of work and getting really angry at everyone for no reason. And i'm starting to really hate interacting with other people. I getting tired of continuing like this. This is the third medication I've been on and nothing seems to work. What should I do? My medication has already been increased twice.",4.549015151515151,6.515557373737372,6.1615025252525255,72.92892045454549,71.22222222222223,8.990404040404039,30.556818181818183,9.516144504307137,3.19470606060606,416,18,70,10,8,142,65,99,0.226,0.667,0.107,-0.9566,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,2,5,1,0,4,0,7,3,0,1,0,12,21,5,0,2,1,0,2,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,3,2,7,3,13,17,1,14,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,1,10,45,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729734272113083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19533640904939095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655214050176328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944386389003816,0.0,0.0,0.15245960284259966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16914191556359612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17900449842019714,0.12645693258188867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774433488718687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17476204583691324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17295759348778966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566405935109742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14128875823981588,0.0,0.0,0.1312516614700082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984714926874164,0.0,0.18574361882089094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16897734782519433,0.12271737138783445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16733292601905542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267959867547273,0.18199713284128669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611444706524756,0.1846614263970191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505790669588139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309049405011644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034484893416502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577327191088939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ccuupid,2020/03/04,"When there’s no one to call F(20)

My mom had a heart attack about 2 weeks ago and I’m the only family member actually helping and I’m so stressed and tired of going to hospitals and groceries stores and going over to cook in between my job and taking care of my self. I live an hour away from my mother witch makes this whole thing very strenuous. 

My boyfriend doesn’t care to comfort me. I’ve been so stressed with my mom and my mental health isn’t helping my case. (Depression, anxiety). I’ve been having panic attacks and there’s no one here for me. No one to make my days brighter. He complained to me right before I go to bed and first thing when I get up in the morning and it’s just not a positive atmosphere. 

My job is cutting my work week by a shift and I’m stressed out about that too. 

I’m just so tired of life.",1.3734746922024603,3.4268686046511654,2.694254445964436,93.76675102599181,80.97674418604652,5.907523939808482,22.326949384404926,7.048011613610866,0.5625426812585497,648,21,144,8,17,209,102,172,0.217,0.7,0.084,-0.9729,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,13,13,3,4,6,0,7,6,1,2,0,18,20,16,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,5,13,1,0,0,1,1,3,6,10,0,4,3,0,17,3,23,17,1,18,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,0,8,89,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.11547061696177276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489023097948906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905202496124668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692293341653761,0.11117262555316816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068802729940456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082565534552407,0.0,0.2412856406593978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631147885011139,0.0,0.1019153428825582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115486804717514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064935106857753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061821259541462024,0.0,0.20174481553470647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577664926297588,0.0,0.14021871297291116,0.1586249210928561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652879856979625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348436644036906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357824583898345,0.0,0.0,0.10448539190163872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15796911296161414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924633648498735,0.0,0.0,0.2771675859746117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405454246554543,0.08999343157098535,0.0,0.13883188136271174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105107864545212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12344143784674695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4066314160580071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896758933269834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722312885669915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27200021728508944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763261857510974,0.0,0.0,0.1898304416633168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210848055510274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614386352283476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rmode,2020/03/04,"Isolation (panic, vent) I'm not sure how to start this. Sorry for broken english.
I'm writing this while feeling pressure on my chest and loneliness, swety hands and panicing mind.
I haven't felt this lonely for a long time.
Trying to do things like play a game but then putting it away imidietly after getting it up.
Looking at all the ways I could just have fun and chat with people and feeling so stupid.
I could just join a random chat in so many places but I dont know what would i say or how the people would react.
As a child I never really had contact with my parents. They were around, but often doing their own things and if me and my sis started to play around or near them they would ask us to go away. So, most of my child hood i spent with my sis or alone in my room, mostly playing games or drawing or chatting with people on the internet.
It probably was not ideal, cause in my loneliness i ended up chating with men and you can probably ques what happend there. That started slowly happening when i was like 8 years old. 
Now at age 24, i feel so very anxious about contacting people 'cause I used to wait that somebody needed my attension for some reason. Here I sit in a room with my cat, trying to figure out what I should do so I would feel better.",4.139912165129555,5.241727841897233,4.8165678524374185,85.56465854194117,70.97628458498025,7.361352657004831,25.91326306543698,7.594959193182576,1.2952074659639878,996,30,198,11,18,320,152,253,0.11800000000000001,0.782,0.1,-0.5832,1,4,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,1,4,2,17,14,1,3,8,0,18,2,2,7,3,63,38,27,0,10,13,3,6,2,0,5,0,1,2,3,13,16,0,1,8,8,1,2,5,5,0,0,6,8,30,9,35,25,5,38,0,1,1,0,22,19,0,11,17,144,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657169786715164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715365377493967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20039332716138114,0.1052225240696814,0.0,0.21149582886906254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954460883031882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312473265134235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17972995575451572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13191210842663548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996891782629126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22764214806638494,0.0,0.1080692112014258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058804667351307086,0.0,0.0639668664973988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953087295435804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061856574808313164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997611359891564,0.0,0.0,0.09960649040617056,0.094516767994093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411179469351385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364716040588885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345714889292258,0.08680835892241923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810618378638638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26411505238954325,0.12497757375992627,0.0,0.0,0.31212227932071873,0.0,0.117594669832886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427038695190349,0.0,0.0,0.113147564860652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210478794293844,0.1157239584132125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950722679202143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599466206443166,0.23899828314261004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060805385008966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14955136567784072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656309727189641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15283316007588088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538825328226714,0.09721026642591347,0.0,0.0928685973163626,0.0,0.08933989508075066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31981970155702355,0.0,0.0,0.07248089823204393
mentalhealth,Throw_Away2457,2020/03/04,"How do I tell my parents i need a therapist?  I have been through some bad stuff a year ago, and as far as they know i'm fine now.  
I am hesitating to tell them because my uncle is going trough heavy depression right now.  
I feel that if I will tell them I need help, I am putting a load on their shoulders of another close relative who can't be okay on his own.  
What should i do? If i don't tell them, what can I do to help myself? And if I do tell them, how?",2.0594342291371994,2.4660973762376277,3.823281471004247,93.35039603960396,75.23762376237623,7.751626591230551,24.32956152758133,7.957251820313856,0.8656749646393211,349,10,90,5,7,118,62,101,0.128,0.7959999999999999,0.075,-0.7207,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,6,0,4,4,0,0,3,1,15,1,1,2,0,14,21,9,0,6,3,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,1,22,2,8,17,2,11,0,1,0,0,16,5,0,4,4,64,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265793885672713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805821264345148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14379207934191748,0.10498048140675777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14832826696101284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707692573587866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787358151139088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308637637577672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464469416777006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553900327511557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912240417933466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17312333741804814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707041104981747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19714462710119451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7526161832160411,0.0,0.0,0.1999545377199204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109006191732286
mentalhealth,mewnagi,2020/03/04,I need some advice Here recently I’ve been feeling extremely anxious to the point where I got so overwhelmed in class that I was crying despite the fact “nothing” was going on to warrant tears. I’ve been wanting to go to the doctor to see if I could get out on anxiety medication to see if it helps but I’m anxious about that too. What if they don’t believe me? Do I need to go to my family doctor or a specialist? Should I tell my family or do this on my own? I’ve been putting this off to the point I feel like it’s impacting my life. I don’t feel like myself anymore because I live in this weird fear to the unknown.,3.357472434266328,4.025164832061074,5.0393384223918565,84.85805767599663,72.43511450381679,8.264970313825277,29.05937234944869,8.515128840125781,2.000520949957592,487,19,105,8,9,166,75,131,0.128,0.7879999999999999,0.084,-0.6937,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,2,6,0,11,4,0,0,1,17,25,7,0,8,6,0,3,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,3,0,0,4,2,3,0,0,6,5,16,2,18,17,2,15,0,1,2,0,3,10,0,6,3,71,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678958010463625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491501941849433,0.3394032083053192,0.14897415481894224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915704312080498,0.0,0.0,0.16924227255433666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993545171660296,0.0,0.1650054960490375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075053923680215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832210215371147,0.16903504286560306,0.2278615471483005,0.21462903677498724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848179021928446,0.0,0.25611406833282124,0.0,0.12014165693849913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068678536394693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610217917724037,0.14677614321051752,0.0,0.13264370006412535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15132706743964447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22276689068179384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441365423873507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840058192061017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100882037417376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14832042378480484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394058039740431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13129562278195686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860143570105951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Skuvenshmuven,2020/03/04,very bad meth comedown and i need some tips! i smoked a total of 3 points of meth today its been 6 hours and i feel like I'm being attacked and watched in a sinister devil like way. i have horrible anxiety shadow figures. I know this is what happens and it goes away but i need someone to help me please.,0.3755952380952401,2.748182492063492,2.278075396825397,92.75616071428574,89.15873015873017,5.0547619047619055,22.160714285714285,6.6274283507984215,0.6207476190476195,239,9,50,3,8,79,49,63,0.22699999999999998,0.621,0.152,-0.4534,0,0,3,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,12,10,5,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,7,2,5,8,2,6,1,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,4,29,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19812845051393405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29464120481025313,0.2433318526485971,0.0,0.21624780685556105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130954321714291,0.1850241974752806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22902609324470535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17359712309440115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550553097204931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14233543069941015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530611748913905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3840791142875399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842958430839195,0.2448314988805956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21944339060432164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454944790633992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136958251962258,0.0,0.2055760844237656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lov3ly101,2020/03/04,How do i become less self-conscious and become more confident? I also mumble alittle and my heart races in presentations,6.024285714285713,9.100657380952386,6.48595238095238,67.2632142857143,70.42857142857143,8.009523809523811,29.54761904761905,8.841846274778883,3.16964761904762,99,4,13,2,2,32,18,21,0.0,0.83,0.17,0.5413,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825415135994417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7804052634427161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41867350914375295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685789069183113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yourstrulygronkh,2020/03/04,I need help Hello. I got sexually abused last night and I need to talk to someone before it gets traumatic.,1.134285714285717,3.771838619047621,3.4352380952380983,82.90142857142861,91.38095238095238,6.609523809523811,21.285714285714285,7.793537801064563,1.499685714285714,85,3,16,2,3,29,17,21,0.28300000000000003,0.607,0.109,-0.6486,0,0,0,0,1,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,7,4,0,0.0,0.4040711552756456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901959874192062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17817690878764186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27275714519400884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285888245131369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27798934967357386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5057468216641611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200385989826464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28895816826492604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27411131787480186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cupcakedarkandtwisty,2020/03/04,"Question I have a really bad habit of zoning out often. However, yesterday something weird happened and I don’t know what to make of it so I figured I would post here to see if anyone has ever had a similar experience. My friend was talking to me and I kind of zoned out on her face, and when I regained my focus, for a second my friend looked and sounded exactly like my old step-mom. Her face and voice didn’t change or alter in any way (since this moment I have realized that they do look kind of alike and the way my friend said what she did at the time really did sound like my old stepmoms voice), it was just that for a second I felt like she was her. 

I don’t know what to think of this or why it would happen. I literally haven’t thought about that woman in years. I’ve been going to therapy and a lot of memories I didn’t know I had have randomly been resurfacing so I don’t know if maybe it’s related to all of these things coming back or what, but there was no memory attached or anything. It was just a really bizarre thing.",4.10275747508306,4.561319930232564,5.327657807308974,84.21866279069769,70.62790697674419,9.119601328903654,26.519933554817282,9.23628265651192,1.903691029900333,815,24,176,16,14,272,116,215,0.05,0.892,0.057999999999999996,-0.0992,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,11,10,0,0,8,0,24,2,2,1,3,38,40,17,0,4,9,0,1,3,3,2,0,5,0,1,17,10,0,0,10,0,0,2,7,2,0,2,16,9,26,8,22,22,2,20,0,0,3,0,13,6,0,10,12,126,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933826224757778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185917675908198,0.0,0.10810892721089306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101786043606516,0.10969111153901402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13897539699657846,0.11316635549448847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883455574179524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850817119655927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613884762156116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3044957614609329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466240140223841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323457250711402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736098857272882,0.2887970395044235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19254688843905568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206407553668172,0.0,0.0,0.11168877327230768,0.0,0.0,0.08769261274324971,0.0,0.13198200948578434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15386267179812008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757080902909105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581918431305475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14716801931276896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524830548314198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496597115867945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468740950481968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867324582784813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113748646851103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559277969216414,0.0,0.0,0.15023667198803126,0.0,0.17455699654986134,0.08417862429308612,0.0,0.1042956244036664,0.07660475333369536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20855581875420198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854385435099585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866474648634352,0.0,0.0,0.08460001582249957
mentalhealth,selfsooth2019,2020/03/04,"Bipolar but with no ups? Is that a thing? I’m kind of self diagnosing but basically if my mood is a line on a graph it’s like it’s stays average and then I have large dips downwards, but there aren’t much peaks upwards. It’s like I’ve got a limiter on my positive emotion but the negative emotion can be fucking intense.
So most of the time I’m either stable or low, there’s not much ups.

Anyone experienced that?",1.3114987080103369,3.5283309767441864,3.504108527131784,86.9593669250646,82.25581395348838,6.612919896640828,25.834625322997407,7.793537801064563,1.5604795865633083,328,14,69,6,9,112,60,86,0.114,0.706,0.18100000000000002,0.7294,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,1,0,6,0,6,3,0,0,0,12,10,9,0,1,8,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,6,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,1,3,3,7,8,4,9,0,1,0,1,1,6,1,3,4,46,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17886995544786602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596441684339059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5755089645768623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364944118571592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20459651937505133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26638921551894423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24995400257829264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3761030488538532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26686809014262936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726619470773985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16995037021655016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491662488096284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rickz6,2020/03/04,"Should I seek therapy? Hi there, im a generally happy person and Ive never really sought mental therapy before. A few years ago, I had a violent fallout with a friend. It was pretty much my fault, and it cancelled a recurring activity we had with a few others. The person in question sent me a furious message, and I apologized profusely. Some time later, he messaged me with a very brief forgiveness email. The group got together one last time to hang out but no one really addressed what had happened.

Fast forward a couple years, I still think about the whole incident. Neither the person or that group is involved in my life, but I still cant seem to shake the feeling of shame. You know when your brain keeps you up at night with the embarrassing things youve done? This is the big one for me. Ive tried messaging the person, but i only had an old email address and im not sure theyll read it. I guess it feels like I never got closure on the fallout. But at the same time, i dont think I should be thinking about this as obsessively every day. I dont really miss that person or the group, however the thought of the incident bums me out and makes me feel ashamed.

I know this is really small compared to the serious issues others face, bit I think about it basically every day and am kind of tired of beating myself up. Does it sound like I should speak to a professional? Or am I doing something wrong with my thought process? Id appreciate your input!",4.384209124209125,5.751696608391608,5.523526473526476,79.7186596736597,70.67832167832168,8.944122544122543,28.654012654012647,9.362217197678863,2.516755111555112,1154,43,221,25,21,383,158,286,0.14300000000000002,0.7709999999999999,0.087,-0.9606,1,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,1,4,1,1,7,18,2,5,25,0,22,4,2,1,3,48,42,15,0,3,8,0,3,2,1,4,2,2,2,5,15,14,0,1,14,1,0,5,8,11,0,3,11,5,32,7,27,26,8,35,0,1,0,0,28,12,0,7,22,149,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598780049389153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254288242760886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590276063304124,0.0,0.0,0.10828805070648752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10733259087461006,0.0,0.12511853882827945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488846649830531,0.09926831781103336,0.22737489291171906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16345936114218446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471437392750084,0.0692993605619439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494470757418918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551652120848673,0.0,0.10686035440406656,0.0,0.0857799251688615,0.10326209028810407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20956097508607413,0.10124651127876072,0.0,0.08622121857912,0.0,0.10101427739185367,0.1066212362206928,0.0790708459145104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685164811033476,0.09478207630313093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475062759751422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775677005901183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130877582794498,0.0,0.14963024660321228,0.0,0.0,0.0910312671207282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178891540338317,0.0,0.19719636225261344,0.07377557630891074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42349882221397056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868749096114388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086661842393151,0.0,0.0970298076226538,0.0,0.24857185034027435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830839516906705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467807740709939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15493433198132728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142470456028497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218640429352638,0.0,0.06444485301876632,0.24862385018593275,0.0,0.1540199778420186,0.16969066265019106,0.11149131906659164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585904777827863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003809362736937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830100728584227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605816179617657,0.0,0.12493422074912808
mentalhealth,arfamac,2020/03/04,"Cleaned my flat So I have spent 2 days cleaning, did the bathroom spotless last week, the living room yesterday with 10 bags to the tip. Today I did the bedroom, threw out most my clothes as I never wear them, have 13 bags to take the tip tomorrow. Feel so much better mentally, have been putting it off for years and it just builds and builds. Place was a mess so never want people round, wouldnt open the blinds either. I feel like a weight has been lifted. Now just the dreaded kitchen.",2.3583157894736817,4.851722147368419,2.275000000000002,95.6725,80.15789473684211,5.063157894736842,22.13157894736842,6.2581,0.24350526315789445,384,12,79,3,10,114,69,95,0.081,0.86,0.06,-0.2551,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,6,4,0,1,9,0,10,4,1,0,2,15,16,6,0,2,3,0,4,1,0,1,1,0,5,0,2,5,2,0,2,0,1,2,3,2,0,0,7,5,7,2,7,8,3,17,0,0,2,0,1,5,0,1,11,48,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262184004497907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16495823504529367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25866213758653783,0.18273071784757666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20849647554624293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496216921419938,0.0,0.2258601994853752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577681038106629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880292067662737,0.0,0.39454970654563176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773270386069627,0.0,0.2672377582633525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571315658208677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19231623778884469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24245143607697614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086685558724275,0.0,0.2051728985370306,0.31147357805288434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471522721201426
mentalhealth,Abusedpotato2,2020/03/04,"I need some advice I don't really know how to start this so im just gonna get straight to the point.

Im 18 and in a pretty bad shape mentally. I used to self harm when i was around 14 and recently did it again, but only just once. For about a year now im basically losing all hope, motivation. Sometimes i don't want to get up from bed, I have suicidal thoughts and im just tired of it all. Im also starting to fail my classes, which is just fantastic.

I went to therapy about 2 years ago but it didn't really help. The woman just told me to change the way I look and im gonna be happy again, which was a load of bs.

I feel like I really need to tell my mom, I need her help. But I have no idea how to tell her all of this and not offend her. When raising me she and my grandma always told me im not allowed to be sad, because I have everything- loving family, money, roof above my head. Yet i can't help but feel this way.",0.9350703012912476,2.138660882926832,3.44562410329986,91.83724533715929,79.1951219512195,7.164992826398853,20.35150645624104,7.928766900206844,0.5580157819225251,711,17,175,12,17,249,111,205,0.18100000000000002,0.68,0.139,-0.8514,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,18,10,1,0,6,0,13,3,1,5,3,37,34,16,1,5,11,1,2,1,0,2,1,0,1,2,8,7,0,0,6,0,1,1,7,6,0,0,8,3,25,4,20,22,4,21,0,3,1,1,15,6,0,2,13,104,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09058912272283333,0.08217636362299205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413522996460224,0.07713702394502643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252607486036087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740383688264918,0.05651140240728018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980683740815091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833162367466404,0.0,0.08739293299777465,0.0,0.09374769718539946,0.06622764415033137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686786378998394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868496497463372,0.0,0.0,0.09514088824746864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18641229607851606,0.0,0.0,0.09207583372098048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465135509356474,0.7009524114853801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509476078425044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04529041516640245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784788028154539,0.10371188788676798,0.0,0.0,0.0836688379447259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342366983266716,0.0,0.0,0.10857362080750158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20621617540058249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872656754916033,0.0,0.07050545019682794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763509641393054,0.0,0.0,0.09431313623192178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17816536743593153,0.0,0.09153386134742378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671032648047913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916864714184358,0.0,0.1312325148115065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140295808732153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205449019865212,0.0,0.10601492399151748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359649643120028,0.0,0.10654943054479124,0.0,0.17716498994782018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006635588020315,0.0,0.0,0.054679128630391115,0.1471679915472092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593739146504567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939647129321372
mentalhealth,williamsalex027,2020/03/04,"trans and depressed [rant that makes no sense, but i do feel better after writing it and im curious if y'all have some thoughts about it]

today was the 4th time to see my psychologist, and this is the first time i got super upset after.
she didn't word it, but the way she spoke made me feel like she doesn't believe i'm trans (born female, transitioning to male). i haven't felt bad about my identity for the last few weeks, but now i feel insecure again. i know, for some people the reason they believe they're trans and have dysphoria is because they survived some kind of trauma, let it be sexual assault or parenting problems. none of those happened to me. im almost trying to convince myself that im ok the way i am, im ok living as a girl, even tho it did not work out for the first 13-14 years (im 17 now, out and people know im a trans guy). i was always pretty flat but i still felt bad about having a female chest, and like a 14 year old teenage girl i tried to make them look bigger which made me feel even worse. 
i just want to be one of the guys and most people treat me that way, and i never felt so comfortable being in public.
this really was the least of my problems - im trying to wait out 18 and be happy, and be even happier with hormones and some surgeries, and i wouldn't even have worried about it until now.
why is it so hard to believe you don't know who you are when you're like...5? how was i supposed to know? i know some people do but i did not,, why is that so wrong?",2.4581118143459904,3.5549310981012674,3.884240506329117,90.6657700421941,75.04430379746836,6.659071729957807,21.710970464135016,6.996647511020387,0.4073843881856538,1161,27,261,11,24,384,157,316,0.11,0.703,0.187,0.9822,1,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,3,3,6,20,21,1,2,13,2,29,1,1,6,1,60,54,27,0,5,10,1,8,2,0,1,0,1,0,5,16,16,0,1,14,0,0,0,10,10,0,3,15,11,32,11,29,32,9,29,0,1,2,0,19,5,0,9,23,170,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788603206331322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471968720525711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988709844709528,0.04741432972493368,0.0,0.0,0.26289629114194857,0.0,0.0687906168774446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699231383753905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054934018262764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15731282664926868,0.055566473718317286,0.2240447109499516,0.0,0.0,0.13232027138643407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622082484556554,0.0,0.0,0.1540300384696494,0.06878112465690353,0.08279889135432293,0.06967613684479723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5881147404576463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099652210862768,0.213730908634283,0.06340156742812103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795359297714524,0.0,0.1139990118774135,0.0,0.06868169176233792,0.0,0.06531611156018388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471957622280149,0.10383830434988643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05998919108287298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161765197706833,0.0,0.05270614520155227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636614775840218,0.0,0.0,0.2156930886359237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913082932298351,0.0,0.14885105280322591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049828241837455815,0.07997140759590783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061981065164462425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062115684880022025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06174910548564425,0.09070898268936056,0.0,0.07372691088521463,0.0,0.0,0.1584237582198465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04587701107236072,0.1852158514635453,0.062390902901058615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036978078127627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056625200652565565,0.07898997135894452,0.07926507286913945,0.0,0.08504087212742062,0.0,0.10017630808540527
mentalhealth,roseturnip,2020/03/04,"Why is it so difficult to find a therapist who accepts health insurance? I’ve received yet another rejection letter from a therapist who doesn’t accept my health insurance. I work for the government at the State level and have what I would consider to be the best health insurance I’ve ever had for physical healthcare but possibly the worst for mental healthcare. SO MANY  mental health providers do not accept any health insurance whatsoever and charge over $200 per session. That’s $800 per month for a weekly therapist, out of pocket. I have a psychiatrist who is hesitant to prescribe me the medication I need since I’m not seeing a weekly therapist to talk through these very serious issues I’ve been experiencing for quite some time. Most people can’t afford to pay out of pocket for a weekly therapist and I am one of them. Just my two cents as someone who is desperate to find a solution to what seems like an everlasting problem. I’ll remember how I’m feeling at this exact moment when I’m voting in November.",9.64865037812682,8.356215947643982,9.923315881326356,61.71643397324027,59.6806282722513,14.143339150668993,41.117510180337405,13.023866798666859,5.6607377545084345,830,38,136,27,9,279,118,191,0.11699999999999999,0.792,0.091,-0.7278,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,3,7,10,0,0,13,0,13,6,0,1,2,25,20,9,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,1,6,0,0,0,10,5,0,0,8,0,2,1,4,5,0,2,2,3,9,5,25,16,4,18,0,1,1,0,8,7,0,3,10,89,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929192196416425,0.10684552641791313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693225039179227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216963209209793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05152104559183685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18625990524730385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.541546755335671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063516426042074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0497806263986792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330528027272656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10264823756018776,0.20537187780886396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133141478712957,0.0,0.0,0.07555366367080799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690465175087939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064098770681643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487101708380205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749951153018163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837760572602538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542688496462256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119692086617845,0.0927611506149932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428838752904952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633508832812123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189913779755664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5915382730328729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059415646292430416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953636176713486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840738374159243,0.0,0.0,0.24520145913197214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919441603000641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418058925282943,0.0,0.0,0.07238310464493558,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cypherous2,2020/03/04,"So, What To Do So, just coming off a failed CBT referral they suggested that counselling might be more appropriate, however they couldn't refer me as my scores were too low, so this leaves me stuck fending for myself, i've looked at private counselling but the costs for that are far and above what a part timer at national minimum wage can ever afford

Ideally i don't want to end up dipping to the low that resulted in my initial referral but at this point that seems like the only real way to get some actual help, i'm waiting to hear back from the ""mental health navigators"" but from reading their site they don't seem to really offer much more than a friendly meeting in a public place which obviously isn't really going to help much when it comes to actually dealing with stuff

Just feels like i've been dumped in the middle of nowhere without so much as a paddle to steer by",26.59859649122807,8.059152251461988,22.511345029239763,35.1905263157895,52.80116959064328,26.30877192982456,71.61988304093569,15.903189008614273,9.743879532163742,709,25,131,15,3,230,115,171,0.07,0.8079999999999999,0.122,0.9229,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,4,2,10,8,1,0,10,0,11,1,0,1,2,24,24,11,0,3,6,0,1,2,1,1,1,1,0,0,11,4,0,1,4,1,2,3,5,4,0,0,3,3,10,4,28,18,7,24,0,3,1,0,13,16,0,4,6,91,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.307890850549735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213033071360594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717826950354905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263774028025982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397234720529149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14269778187043985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976530619385247,0.11269969231780602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188056882443105,0.0,0.08242010254685851,0.0,0.08965539529065339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16768542742650128,0.1778005437851178,0.0,0.211478743072069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670390092911957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15414154979189945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247386748966314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15897921450206387,0.1673523660777035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34790265149064337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997924198955742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17083251699522706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648196509417887,0.0,0.14912878947758584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577969749800856,0.17955891248981226,0.2021228682707403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28722715141756894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805909132908247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304756422956624,0.12521800812325107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15206950071604575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bitchuchoda,2020/03/04,"Can the gloominess that comes after a happy even comes to an end make you ill? My days have been very dull for a few years now. We had a huge get together with all my relatives for the past few days. Now that everyone has left, I felt extremely gloomy, and now I feel sick and very tired and dizzy.",4.108442622950822,4.6217584918032815,4.285368852459019,91.500512295082,70.63934426229507,8.722950819672132,23.44672131147541,8.841846274778883,1.1120131147540988,232,5,54,4,4,72,46,61,0.265,0.6509999999999999,0.083,-0.9031,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,6,0,5,3,0,1,1,11,11,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,2,6,1,5,8,3,13,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,9,34,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42612895902085934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190321240093573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190728798568789,0.0,0.0,0.16336801491619768,0.0,0.0,0.2363472646162624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12506427934982345,0.0,0.23748849909584874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12922674306434032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26330170015391713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687393804031327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16510367245996665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23611730899180494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842849082439912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4081684976619637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15928107129572505
mentalhealth,Mtnrdr2,2020/03/04,"Why do I have no appetite? No idea if this is the right thread or not but I literally have no appetite and can’t figure out why. I work outside from 6:30 am to like 4:30, wake up at 5:15 am and get home at usually like 5:15 pm. The last two days while at work I had a small protein drink and a banana and then the other day just the protein drink. When I got home my mom asked me how hungry I was and said very, cause I was, but when she put a big plate of food in front of me I probably only ate half and definitely wasn’t full-but I also wasn’t hungry. The next day for dinner (the day without the banana) I ate half of my leftovers-so not much. It started a little while ago when I lost my appetite for meat. I would make chicken and sides or whatever, eat the sides, and maybe take a bite of the meat before being like “I have absolutely no desire to eat this” and either put it in the fridge with anticipation of eating it later (which I never did) or just getting rid of it. It wasn’t for any moral reason or anything- I just had no appetite for it. Now, I just don’t want anything. And I’m usually the kind of person that is constantly eating. 

I’m very happy with my life. Yes, my hours are tough but I graduated in December and am working with great people in the exact field I wanted to be in and I enjoy my job. I am not depressed or feeling anxious/stressed and I am not upset with my body so I’m not trying to starve myself to loose weight. 

Has anyone ever had anything like this happen? Is it possible there is some sort of mental thing going on her I’m not aware about???",1.5814056224899602,3.3448527228915697,3.440457831325304,90.1071526104418,79.0,5.8724497991967874,20.70522088353414,6.742157984588678,0.28522618473895545,1232,32,268,12,30,414,171,332,0.061,0.785,0.154,0.9892,1,0,2,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,0,4,14,12,0,1,17,1,29,14,2,4,3,55,49,31,0,5,21,1,2,4,0,1,1,1,2,1,14,18,11,0,4,2,0,4,18,4,0,3,14,3,33,8,35,32,3,43,1,2,0,0,6,17,0,8,26,184,47,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855873233592652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772124199654732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06565851822557373,0.0,0.0,0.10907602391835107,0.0,0.06751124635386457,0.0,0.23836165341853066,0.0,0.09026287653902916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215844955633479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724725651484313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918526982511357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433816864360856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490716306133555,0.0,0.0831599027393274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18916796464456725,0.0,0.3951862819591001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733660861208624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04881947873724324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675079015789608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088863531794164,0.0,0.054872599039913435,0.0,0.07722127502121601,0.10644867332070594,0.0,0.0,0.08538041618685739,0.10278116036785286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936986063073008,0.0,0.09508404997039327,0.0,0.0,0.1089952021906234,0.0,0.0,0.09581273897720677,0.0,0.0,0.10054381637140797,0.0,0.07870258360727098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819737439438024,0.1886812819173085,0.09677024408912643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539766844902868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644490598674808,0.0,0.09699923590695507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730148046050256,0.0,0.0,0.11308027250962382,0.0,0.0,0.07097666436500184,0.0,0.07446668147573722,0.0,0.1026839085754175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734319760396179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669368441132181,0.08430528617061192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884761967906796,0.0,0.0,0.10409914418814806,0.0,0.0,0.1941224042667037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927130586548352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245468870711202,0.09184284861239438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683398436316268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059973259409342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725949191417164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414470939455298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555231772364327,0.0,0.0943170551189884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21267627991084986,0.15933065297632396,0.11389747749273176,0.0,0.0,0.11757405133079098,0.0,0.0,0.17424591939934778,0.0,0.0,0.09307246610133814,0.0,0.21087252741926932,0.0,0.0,0.06858761109283419,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,disisausernameok,2020/03/04,"After spending the last 10 years of my life thinking I hated my life, i realized I actually don’t. I’m 22F, and my depression started when I was about 12. After a million break downs, my boyfriend said he doesn’t understand how I can hate my life when he tries so hard. It made me realize I don’t hate my life. On paper my life is pretty good. I have a close family that loves me, I have an easy job that pays well, I have my dream vehicle, I have a beautiful home, and an awesome boyfriend. I realized what I hate is being me. I hate my brain for making me who I am, and I hate my body. I hate every single thing. Up until recently I used to be able to find a few things about myself that I still liked. Not anymore though. There’s no pills, or therapy that could fix that or give me a new brain and body. I cry all the time because I feel so much self hatred and it’s becoming over whelming. I feel like I’m going crazy and one of these days my brain is just gonna snap. I don’t want to be me anymore. I could never kill myself, because I saw first hand how my dads suicide effects my immediate family. I could never put them thru that too. These days I just pray to get taken out In a car accident or something. Anything that makes it not my fault so they could still heal.",1.7773929266709914,3.3583945037313465,3.5282284231018837,90.52073004542505,77.84328358208955,6.899675535366646,22.473069435431533,7.7425588080867325,0.8510046722907205,989,29,222,15,23,331,149,268,0.177,0.6759999999999999,0.147,-0.9158,1,0,1,0,0,2,29.0,0,0,2,2,17,15,8,0,10,0,21,14,6,7,3,38,48,18,2,5,7,1,4,2,0,1,7,1,1,1,16,8,0,0,9,1,2,3,9,10,1,3,5,6,50,5,19,35,4,29,1,1,1,1,10,7,0,3,20,152,66,3,0.08421816808862267,0.0,0.08218478343769609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16704358529415195,0.0,0.0,0.06930437648396122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026772271640987,0.09301234996845993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187094798239023,0.0,0.2820459846220319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689654172962304,0.0,0.0925097030648385,0.1086275024438987,0.0,0.07253698476864014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095743891447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878678729787402,0.0,0.08516647251684857,0.0601654761100977,0.0,0.0,0.0769738798922431,0.07163593075331133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04400051684960407,0.08078974087323376,0.04786312573320948,0.07063820368881556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544293647335833,0.5820360367242504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844776893225906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357353675143983,0.0,0.09317492503036352,0.0,0.0,0.0686490474413873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974289137405993,0.08228948580822977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07601018479679461,0.07968926695556955,0.11243256232789678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191004381175474,0.0,0.12990848623064216,0.0813384315366142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057068410280172135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856801539240874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466252014317578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315528083201287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011076361871723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878579166164089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483526032204462,0.0,0.0,0.0596100528416594,0.0,0.1345134756492335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212100672715014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631081489546768,0.0,0.11190161736784084,0.05396360153060641,0.08274392254807691,0.0,0.04910829107704316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571786079064314,0.0,0.0,0.08767408309347616,0.0,0.0727374570503855,0.0,0.0,0.0496740575561647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757222473070574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05423373904797029
mentalhealth,ujinx,2020/03/04,"need help please so i was watching new netflix movie “All the bright places” and when Violet found out Flinch was gone /dead/, i started crying so hard that i couldnt breathe, i had to stop the movie and soon it became kinda out of control to the point where i found myself cutting my wrist, then i kinda calmed down. is this considered panic attack?",2.898699360341148,5.504981343283582,2.7607675906183395,92.31701492537312,78.85074626865672,5.0226012793177,20.01918976545842,6.1826913282559595,0.07131300639658901,278,7,53,2,7,83,52,67,0.2,0.664,0.136,-0.5939,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,2,1,3,0,5,2,2,1,1,13,10,6,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,2,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,6,3,8,2,6,3,1,13,0,0,2,0,1,6,0,2,6,34,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753640770429408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27147695419849266,0.0,0.0,0.26587791221897983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5307853787206873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21682709787909374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162239397605586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794752212022896,0.0,0.2337710709649997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839906951008209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25288821461593475,0.2656955685758993,0.2288132094888479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17132253019659108,0.0,0.0,0.20236262362917384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lostandfound24,2020/03/04,"Personal art project on mental health I finished working on my audio zine and would like to share this here as it related to mental health. Any feedback is welcomed. thanks for listening

 [https://faisalrush.wordpress.com/2020/03/04/how-are-youleap-day-audio-zine/](https://faisalrush.wordpress.com/2020/03/04/how-are-youleap-day-audio-zine/)",24.932941176470585,33.291124941176484,10.283823529411766,36.47220588235294,34.88235294117648,8.105882352941178,34.97058823529412,8.841846274778883,4.0438470588235305,304,9,23,4,4,65,30,34,0.0,0.7440000000000001,0.256,0.8402,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,4,6,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,14,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844591757312861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3498673814351487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5766517381973165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251895823637827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.546712029702413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236844875837668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24973038606131195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19747309586699893,0.0,0.0,0.1926880860164532,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thecatchupp,2020/03/04,"Overwhelming feeling that I'm not doing enough Recently I've been experiencing horrible anxiety and bordering depression as a result of seeing other people in my field doing really well, getting amazing opportunities, achievements etc. Things that I feel like I should be doing. I'm in music (a performer) and considered myself to be doing pretty well and steadily progressing, and I've even had others asking me for advice which is a great sign that I'm able to help others through my experience. Now seeing those people doing well and getting amazing gigs and working with big names makes me feel like I'm being overtaken and getting 'forgotten' almost.

Social media is obviously a big culprit here, watching Instagram stories and so on and feeling bad about myself and my work as a result. It's gotten to the point where I'm experiencing horrible anxiety attacks, unhelpful thoughts and beating myself up about how much I'm working and how much more I should be. It's keeping me up at night and the stress of it is becoming unbearable. I've started to resent people in my field who are doing better than me, which is a horrible feeling and I don't want that. I want to feel happy for people and want to support them!

I've struggled with mental health all my life and as those who have suffered similarly will know all too well, this results in extreme tiredness all the time. I know I'm not doing enough - I have a good amount of time and I just find it difficult to work, and consistently too. I know I should be working harder and I know I could achieve so much more but I'm just so exhausted all the time. And these thoughts make me feel worse, therefore more exhausted, therefore less able to work, and it turns into a cycle.

I guess my question is, how should I go about tackling these thought processes/anxiety/resentment, and how can I deal with this exhaustion and make sure I am working consistently to the point where I will see results and feel like I am making progress and getting closer to where I want to be? Has anyone here experienced similar feelings?",8.154822510822513,8.074880257142857,8.171948051948053,69.12744588744592,62.012987012987004,10.969696969696967,37.81385281385281,10.504223727775694,4.1403333333333325,1669,75,275,35,21,542,175,385,0.124,0.76,0.11599999999999999,-0.6602,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,15,25,28,2,3,13,0,35,5,0,14,6,86,82,36,0,9,5,0,9,3,0,6,5,0,0,0,23,29,0,1,18,0,0,1,3,12,4,0,6,16,34,16,36,63,15,25,0,3,4,0,9,17,0,3,10,205,57,9,0.15594665485743545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619463313396413,0.0,0.0,0.07807902419604949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929876412117332,0.0,0.0,0.0545207635083243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289453552035892,0.08870591654519762,0.0,0.0,0.06510447145491678,0.0,0.08611541409180773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896107167545806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622553572044328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038707678168999,0.06715831265891868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113458163624442,0.08696087140127932,0.05150064738270293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627287613376256,0.0,0.0,0.3548309146587823,0.16711248208465032,0.0,0.0,0.0712662086639175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16295138140438736,0.0,0.04431403887377602,0.0654003276277456,0.0,0.08596586876018855,0.08589641095339634,0.0,0.0,0.08300405695600205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288200085955552,0.0,0.0,0.05226387776826821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930627607662944,0.0,0.0,0.171408406304579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055074867108149836,0.11428148759031367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081912061259176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857877452581237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17195810215844695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317268573379263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162275499262162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14741999525371205,0.0,0.0,0.0793269059122212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734797175445716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04995171017199482,0.0,0.07698925406354745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18640394015986225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794839879009129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551899224805602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931818312522234,0.08151465165293413,0.0,0.0,0.08848320794037408,0.07348893832514032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051802014035998,0.0,0.0,0.18570633681962928,0.1364006228057229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481258963782556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18396275494684156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804295423143577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3973585771816789,0.0,0.07946148209758848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samphol,2020/03/04,"Better It’s taken 6 years, but it dawned on me recently that my depression may have ‘passed’. Even the bad days aren’t so bad anymore.

Still a lot of work to do, but I just feel this massive sense of relief that I haven’t felt I’m trying to hold back the tide for some time now.

Grateful to be one of the lucky ones where it does ‘get better with time’.

Have a good day, everyone.",2.4870416666666664,3.5151042875000047,3.4750000000000014,93.89666666666668,74.875,6.833333333333335,20.833333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.2323333333333335,293,6,69,3,6,94,61,80,0.14800000000000002,0.632,0.21899999999999997,0.7140000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,7,8,0,0,5,0,7,0,0,0,0,11,12,3,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,2,2,2,4,5,9,8,2,12,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,4,9,44,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21587581935506156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16737918951093372,0.36350026157154186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3850329636673479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807656582954286,0.0,0.18748377548172765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904894862207198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14377275766442354,0.0,0.0,0.20799847520797776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006338258233414,0.0,0.2090028237541483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137265775303855,0.0,0.0,0.18257606327402795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850601098369242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29500539770692474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21492850924745416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17383610821655415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25385692134697463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14778752275517412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15847051396819414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14017602451542993
mentalhealth,Chestarpewnewtbattar,2020/03/04,"I opened up to my school nurse about my depression and trauma. And I think its only getting better for the next few days.
Last week I visited our school clinic for a stuffy nose relief. Unfortunately, medicines for that weren't available so I went with a Vicks instead. 
She suggested i'd sit down for a little while. I sat on the chair while applying some Vicks below my nose and thought i'd chat with her.
I had been holding my emotions for the past few months. I was struggling. Flashbacks about what happened were going back more often than it usually does, and it's bugging me a lot. I have been having problems with my friends too. We've been having trust issues and I don't think they're actually here for me, which makes me feel more alone. And it just adds up to my heavy thoughts.
I wanted to open it all up to our school nurse, because at this point, I don't think any of my friends would listen to me and try to help. Maybe they'll try to help, sure, but they can only do so much. I felt like I needed actual help. After what happened, my parents refused the government's suggesiton to take us to therapy (which was also because they had issues with them) and I didn't open up to them about the whole thing because when I tried, they say that's it was just some other emotion I was feeling, and I shouldn't think about it. I feel like they'll think i'm just overreacting.

I was kind of comfortable to open up to her, she is really nice and I know a few people who actually come up and talk to her. I started by asking her if anxiety was a mental illness (although I already knew it was). She was nice and she answered. Eventually our conversation led to what I was holding up and my trauma. It was a different kind of comfort that I felt when she closed the door, sat next to me, and listened eagerly when my voice started to crack talking about my past. She was really nice and even shared stories abiut her experiences with depression last year and her relationships with her friends. It felt nice to have someone actually listen to your problems and somehow relate them to their experiences and share their thoughts about yours. It just says that they were really listening to you and really cared about you. After that, she asked me if it was okay for me to take a BDI test, which determines if you have depression or not, or at what level your depression is. I said yes. The next few days I took the test and scored 39. That afternoon I was excused from class and went to the counselor's office. He was kinda surprised at first, and said that whatever I was going through wasn't obvious to him. At first I wasn't feeling comfortable with him (his face looked like he was gonna crack up anytime or something) but then he started to talk about things and his insights. He also said that out of all the students in our class, I was the kindest and most dependable one. Of course at first I didn't believe him (and I still doubt it up to this day). ""That's impossible, that can't be it, none of my teachers would even give me a task, they probably know i'll do it late,"" I thought to myself. He said even the other teachers observed the same thing, and my teacher's son, who was my classmate, would even say the same thing. I don't really know.
Since we were talking about my paranoia, depression, and trauma, he said he finally understood why I was kinda shy.
Finally he said that we could make me better together and help erase the thoughts, but it's up to me to decide for that. Of course I agreed.
Now, I'm going to go to the counselor's or the nurse's office everyday around afternoon to talk about stuff. We still have 2 weeks left before class ends. We only have a little time left, but a little help wouldn't hurt. It would really help me to continue improving myself this summer and finally come back to school as a better person.
This was an amazing thing to happen to me because I had never talked to anyone in authority about what I was going through in almost 2 years.
Yesterday I gave the school nurse a chocolate bar to thank her. If it wasn't for her, I probably would still have to hold up my emotions for a little longer alone. The world needs more people like her; who'll eagerly listen and care for anyone in need.
Also, if you're going through the same thing as me, go to a psychologist/psychiatrist. I've only talked to our school nurse and counselor, but the feeling of someone actually sympathizing and helping you is really good to help me get through. What more if I actually talked to someone who specializes in helping people like me?
I'm still trying to find a way to get my parents take me to a doctor, but i'm still afraid to open up to them. Our family is still going through stuff and I don't want to add up to their problems. Also, I'm still hesitating to take medication because i'm afraid of the side effects, but if that is what has to be done, I guess i'll think about it. But I'm really thinking if seeing a doctor soon.

P.S. If you think what my counselor said was a mind trick or something, please tell me. I wouldn't get angry or sad or anything, I just simply not believe him. In my point of view, it's just unlikely haha. It kept bugging me because what if it was just an effort to make me feel better? Sure, but it would really make me not trust his compliments anymore lol.",5.388651342320544,5.873542226235745,5.847466297960597,81.5289486115912,67.8022813688213,8.99933172024427,29.72266390137113,8.97023862654752,2.2452092522179985,4210,145,837,69,66,1357,353,1052,0.07,0.769,0.161,0.9986,3,2,2,0,0,0,116.0,11,8,14,9,49,58,1,4,43,4,76,9,3,7,6,174,172,74,0,28,36,3,9,5,3,13,5,16,1,1,66,56,1,5,32,2,0,15,19,18,0,4,63,30,143,40,133,93,20,117,0,7,3,0,122,46,0,29,59,585,209,15,0.0,0.0,0.2194978286826559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03753891040771517,0.07765271791370959,0.04136904328005525,0.11991685902831575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02549318904130002,0.0,0.028678288850352063,0.0,0.03717811531298501,0.052425093109776985,0.0,0.030849506685072824,0.03337235107355624,0.07009261363820209,0.0,0.0,0.05765205966302739,0.0,0.13711436275038064,0.0,0.031899606364615814,0.08447248762718561,0.0,0.13262068873939767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644321936690131,0.0,0.0,0.06458534610268124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029931192155136482,0.0,0.0,0.0725301568134304,0.0,0.16144219961729664,0.0,0.0,0.039167078681034036,0.0,0.07674130422634456,0.03280608317218248,0.03836333514796639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650717798543498,0.033203323706932165,0.0,0.0,0.09904212855859093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334109751512331,0.03534043811346197,0.0,0.1137306385200922,0.026781501423630737,0.10798334577932923,0.12319912178621376,0.03426343822401013,0.0956620593149897,0.0,0.0,0.08688962392940014,0.0,0.07834392617399309,0.03596199515236837,0.17044277919352913,0.03144323414299763,0.0,0.0,0.0412973613377583,0.0,0.09945179159230448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261473091875369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0401317793441705,0.0,0.0,0.07825565961827444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780761609296175,0.06180742722181452,0.06111559919905112,0.04228820223455488,0.0,0.08146184636049023,0.0,0.0,0.0915739442205242,0.15029167229521584,0.0,0.0,0.031480556848048645,0.0,0.0,0.03187103643152668,0.0,0.0,0.10009437380789406,0.0,0.0376618285740495,0.0,0.0,0.03776531016460313,0.03777918086509295,0.0,0.03785228769143356,0.0,0.029922638503763505,0.0,0.027558062092743547,0.08339083876409867,0.0289131287065785,0.0,0.11960703790874255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02540290229509648,0.11404553727044366,0.0,0.0,0.08325218263338073,0.0,0.07157325405487389,0.07796857134105946,0.03273315718372696,0.0,0.041150669102626485,0.07087673099294306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083701044573237,0.10761312755152597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21614249319194087,0.0,0.0,0.04024818279660843,0.0,0.0,0.2496183306492472,0.08943610962808779,0.0,0.2276397115571871,0.029873156849127263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031010538261237727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529061968223652,0.057720331621372675,0.0,0.0,0.07960279640039297,0.0,0.20956627876622075,0.0,0.0,0.03919069477139327,0.08582979601673417,0.0,0.0,0.07066416877390043,0.0,0.11274552317854987,0.2410520756832089,0.03276624599622905,0.03451399972909047,0.04287090193575493,0.0,0.14943254098210834,0.1921668524416277,0.0,0.14880679354019893,0.02185960873949059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04165065114598726,0.10180781857323724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04509356058680284,0.0,0.041287838614792,0.0,0.0442228975541894,0.029756303622908938,0.060141374575493164,0.0,0.0,0.06950367633914145,0.033827173403926485,0.04185411751691159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15978279584138538,0.0,0.0,0.048282206123131284
mentalhealth,CH3RRYB3RRIE,2020/03/04,"I'm becoming mentally and emotionally abusive and i don't know how to stop Before I say anything i want to apologise if I have upset anyone who reads this, i feel i have to say this because while I don't go into great detail I talk about some sensitive topics, again I'm so sorry if i upset anyone who reads this i just don't know what to do.

For a while now i have noticed i have these thoughts of hurting and mentally abusing the people around me and I don't know what to do.

For some backstory (this is going to be very basic as theres alot) I'm a 18 year old girl who came from a really rough background, my mother was (and still is but better) really mentally unstable and up to the age of 11, she used me as a psychologist up to the age of 15. I was the victim of mental and verbal abuse, severe neglect and at one point almost physical abuse just before i ran away to live with my father. Basically up to I started living with my dad i was the real life version of Steven Kings Carrie, with the naivety to periods and all.

Because of what i went through i have PTSD, OCD traits relating to my body hair, memory issues (probably due to trying to cope with PTSD by forgetting the truama) and anger problems. I also have dyslexia but the only because I missed out on so education that i fall under the diagnosis.

While i have been handling my mental problems and education quite well I have noticed that I have been fantasizing and thinking of different ways to gain control over peoples lives.

I constantly think of different ways i can break someone either physically or emotionally, I have learnt to see peoples weak points and exploit them so i can get them to do what i want, how to gain peoples trust so they confind their problems and secrets, i know how to gas light people and I can convince anyone of anything if i wanted to.

I know that this is wrong and I feel that it's wrong to do these, i can't help but think about being a dictator or a cult leader and having people fear me and bend to my every will with no say in what they want.

I feel horrible because up to this year I have never acted on these feelings to a point of causing true damage, the worst i have ever done is cause manipulate people into thinking the sunshines out of my ass. I have recently mentally fucked my ex to the point that i think they may of tried to commit suicide and the only reason they didn't do it is because I messaged their mother telling her that her daughter is threatening suicide.

I feel like a fucking disgrace because even though at the time I was genuinely terrified that she was going to take her life, theres a small part of me who wants to continue the mental fuckery on her so i can see if she actually does it. According to many of her friends who we used to share she had threatened suicide in the past for attention many times and this time was probably no exception.

I am terrified of what i am capable of when given the power and validation from others, i want to speak out and get help but I fear if i tell anyone I know they will turn their back on me until i have no one to turn to.

I don't want to be an abuser and manipulator, i don't want to put people though the mental torture I went through as a child, i don't want this to be me! All I have ever wanted was to protect the people i love because no one was there for me when I was young, but I don't know what to do I don't know who to turn to anymore, i have been trying to see my old psychologist who helped me learn to cope with my truama but it has been a long and grueling process and I don't know how long i can handle these thoughts anymore. 

Please does anyone have or had these same feelings? How did you cope without therapy? What can i do to handle this so i don't have an anger episode where I manipulate people?",5.923121843529806,5.528947711313397,6.8213221640910895,78.00994133123659,66.6853055916775,9.754268606163247,31.92793419421175,9.289312734170188,2.651959179846977,3006,108,598,50,43,1006,291,769,0.21600000000000005,0.71,0.07400000000000001,-0.9992,3,0,0,0,3,4,45.0,1,1,10,7,33,32,6,4,33,0,78,9,3,14,7,127,137,62,3,18,19,6,8,1,1,3,3,4,0,2,41,39,0,4,26,2,0,10,19,21,1,3,25,17,106,11,103,105,10,74,0,4,4,4,51,28,3,13,34,449,147,3,0.0,0.2710187088692527,0.044643319086148464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04580988064080261,0.0,0.0,0.03658455279630382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073918270082794,0.15993986185652995,0.0,0.07529319331444306,0.0407253008352733,0.0,0.0,0.042981627073648165,0.03517728595709211,0.0,0.19521232619965254,0.05052492499104007,0.07785613083491634,0.0,0.0,0.040460270794142515,0.0,0.05081556723621039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05232337259824258,0.0,0.09399132269536732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049437192113893816,0.05131012297931445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559356837689853,0.0,0.0,0.08006853358754129,0.04681595136949567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292038599902953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030216034765007387,0.08276312982413359,0.03854455112601286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295813831644562,0.13878897706996074,0.03268228540127952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035344688643493286,0.08458633193610851,0.047802744778453435,0.0,0.07799870140880724,0.0,0.0,0.05043718498836455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199149299221142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048974037916711496,0.0,0.0,0.047748887589497635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226276482161653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462614292405726,0.022350097053896144,0.0,0.121188614382749,0.08097084557451892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041289236179017176,0.0,0.0,0.09276231366733632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36882472023620777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03528357537858387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416849982967707,0.09600938181605494,0.0,0.09299981614510346,0.06958662882369494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049540481978537096,0.04367151563160112,0.31715810857541193,0.0,0.0,0.0502174202555716,0.17298608572984514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986478765541695,0.1313235913076925,0.10695361703079148,0.04598924208706564,0.0,0.04865848788334705,0.09152049425680488,0.052071088249175626,0.05861451021819576,0.047036426681326966,0.04517049970322225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091416203225332,0.0,0.0,0.1093653812611384,0.0,0.0,0.051682068216955625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038762019341351685,0.0,0.0,0.051210991791960536,0.032380575800504574,0.0,0.03653430576566556,0.03824726535438375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15012222430354616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034396702671294827,0.03677040268128028,0.07997130453876643,0.0,0.052316673001698386,0.0,0.0,0.14656693011760324,0.08989409431379057,0.07263739279141193,0.08002784761207933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317939638803338,0.1492816277412983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902293755089343,0.0,0.03774678146655963,0.26983277305399583,0.0726250550413836,0.0,0.0,0.041132826626135065,0.08481746227079262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0440993113736004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003622211952176,0.0,0.0589202530268618
mentalhealth,st0rmforce,2020/03/04,"Believing my own bullshit? Is this normal? I'll summarize this as much as I can, but it's going to have to be a long one to get enough context.

Me and my long-term girlfriend broke up a few months back, but we've kept in touch a bit. Things are fine between us, we just don't want to be together any more. She started seeing a new guy over a month ago, but I haven't even had a date since we broke up... nothing. Just been dealing with my own things.

She phoned me last night, asking for some computer help. It was the first time we'd spoken in about 3 weeks. In passing, she asked how Ive been recently.

I don't know why, but I decided to lie and say I've started dating someone. I didn't want to make her think I'd locked myself in my flat since she left... I don't know why. ""Well it's about time! Glad you're getting back out there. So, how long have you been dating?""  ""Ohh... it's only been a couple of weeks."" ""Nice. So... a few dates? ...Come on, spill it!""

The conversation went on for probably 10 minutes and I managed to invent a realistic imaginary woman and the 4 imaginary but believable dates we'd been on, on-the-fly. I also slipped in something about not being sure if it was going to last, so that I could drop the whole thing easily (I could almost see myself being pulled into a ridiculous sitcom-style farce if I wasn't careful).

So I have no idea why I did it, but I did, and I think she believed it all. I really felt weird about it afterwards, like I'd done something that wasn't normal. Like I'd gone a bit insane. I'd been so worried about what my ex would think, that I just lied non-stop for 10 minutes without really pausing. I was a bit shocked at how easy it was.

But here's the thing that worries me more. I woke up this morning feeling great. In fact, I specifically felt like I was looking forward to something... perhaps my date on Friday, that wasn't actually going to happen, because I'd made up the entire thing last night. I feel different in myself, as if it was true.

I'm not saying I've fallen into my own fantasy. I don't actually believe she exists. But I have that feeling inside, that you get when you first start dating somebody. I feel better today than I have for a long time. It's as if talking about dating somebody and pretending it's real, flipped some switches in my brain and put me into honeymoon-period mode.

I've been a bit worried about my mental health for a while now, but this is new. Do you think it's unhealthy behavior? I'm not sure what I should do.",2.498350439204806,4.004097526213595,4.0166088765603325,88.10528317152105,75.67961165048544,6.846509477577437,24.30073971336107,7.536579438409214,1.0535982431807676,1946,62,413,25,42,647,232,515,0.128,0.785,0.087,-0.9635,1,0,3,0,0,0,92.0,5,4,0,3,27,18,1,0,21,0,48,2,1,5,5,72,87,35,0,12,20,1,7,3,1,2,1,2,0,2,32,15,0,1,14,2,0,11,14,5,1,3,28,12,60,13,53,49,17,74,0,2,3,0,29,24,0,7,43,272,92,2,0.0,0.0,0.135981409356627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061760826310709664,0.0,0.0697673499586187,0.0,0.0,0.055717396821721374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04737996447121323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13026952173352488,0.0,0.0,0.1071483263275252,0.0,0.042471956104834674,0.0,0.0,0.3139900195371522,0.0,0.06162002241501504,0.30425906780795303,0.0,0.0,0.07777800400515886,0.0,0.0,0.07103616993153256,0.0,0.0,0.06001703825183734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11125629034437233,0.07709174399636104,0.0,0.0,0.07182970555441805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279335642717115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129957155863159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199073543250223,0.0,0.046018296540471515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14091485647769647,0.0,0.13379382961775454,0.0,0.0,0.11852747451471644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920365139427028,0.0,0.11879015228559907,0.0,0.0,0.0768146235438252,0.0,0.06898712974179977,0.0616115196443021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405903978410269,0.0,0.0,0.04670027946683445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865222893977844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658081278317086,0.17037814966951784,0.0,0.0,0.07569981495972612,0.0,0.0,0.10211598595911198,0.0,0.0,0.2466333131901283,0.058507692489087375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592618717204353,0.04650720499408061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021390082817051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122449583663192,0.0,0.05121760171841936,0.0,0.0,0.1345810512914625,0.0,0.13076660282493216,0.13652930755320866,0.06685303127457642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04721216346285705,0.052989383705783086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511917549179599,0.0,0.0,0.07004051314122195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930301903844263,0.08926849382365576,0.0,0.06879358811935933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108133807754806,0.0,0.0,0.11104056913881126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11526829371330127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059033626166711824,0.16091281814861308,0.0,0.0,0.1479445219328868,0.0,0.0,0.058249668185398076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133177651768926,0.0,0.0,0.05600044174092975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314379104390504,0.17857433659003882,0.0,0.0,0.12188049330593333,0.0,0.06604176714144773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380792591393534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218976886481945,0.0,0.11177480330218756,0.0,0.06264430882312108,0.06458748080187805,0.18860687905029652,0.07778731008163149,0.0,0.06716219397427724,0.0,0.0,0.21226865057938551,0.0,0.049493632579087635,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ranga_mullet,2020/03/04,"Walking in circles, A short rap I wrote after having a panic attack i'm walking in circles, 

repeating words that mean nothing 

pacing to chase my thoughts

As they loop and descend into towards an end that renders my goals unobtainable

I need to be perfect flawless rought from gold molded to be sold but nobody's buying it

they look and they see my madness my addiction not my conviction to a dream that escapes me a dream of perfection, a dream without insecurities 

an inscrutible indisputible dream of who I could be

and all they see is my addiction 

and I see it too, I'm not hooked on high or excited to try I am a slave to my hubris to my delusion to my brains intentional confusion

to my self belief

I believe in my dreams uncontainable as they soar above my mind and I fall hooked on the delusion that I have grown to love

and the world screams the truth but their outcry only serves to further cleave my mind 

they scream of how I'm falling failing disabling the functions I was once proud of

and I play my words on repeat and keep walking

keep walking in circles

​

(I hope someone out there sees themselves in this)",6.7111768876285005,7.1383179907834124,6.5264516129032275,78.00198511166255,64.9447004608295,8.888904643743354,36.04714640198512,8.617729084823388,3.0249861042183626,912,42,164,12,13,287,124,217,0.127,0.6729999999999999,0.2,0.9562,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,7,5,3,17,2,3,12,0,9,4,1,2,4,36,26,14,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,8,10,0,2,3,7,2,7,3,8,0,0,4,7,33,9,31,18,1,26,1,1,5,1,11,15,0,3,4,110,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260856503091766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620485446540022,0.18173215946340726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014645566944214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16850326548706762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16695878011988555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941174599523115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246605200819614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801868992057555,0.0,0.14854714439552286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658721692837243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12559300139612095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498402837430698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16291503401210605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020265774727722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089708249524753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435071610757651,0.0,0.0,0.15927686009165895,0.0,0.1137473631006946,0.0,0.17547681140329274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4767208468348987,0.0,0.15602403205783225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672197412257866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873418833761795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10154164014571096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14417081178088215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18173215946340726,0.0
mentalhealth,AsseaterNB,2020/03/04,"Ripping my toenails off I'm not sure if this is the place to post this, but I'm thinking this might be a mental health issue.  


Toenails - I've always had the disgusting habit of picking at my toenails while lying in bed. I don't cut them like a normal person, when they get long enough I kind of just peel the excess off with my finger nails. From what I can tell, this is somewhat common.  


That said - I've recently started to go much further. I will obsess over one toe nail, and pick at it until I eventually peel the entire toe nail off. It doesn't hurt a lot, but it does cause discomfort for like a week. 4 of the 5 toes on my left foot are currently scabby, uncomfortable and without nails. I've started on my right foot last night. At the time, it just feels so satisfying to do. But the next day I regret it, as it's incredibly uncomfortable to put shoes one.. But I keep doing it.  


I'm wondering, is this the result of some kind of mental health issues? I do have pretty serious anxiety, which I take Celexa for, which helps tremendously. Or is this just me taking a disgusting habit too far?  


Thoughts?  
Thanks for reading.",3.0883313665329264,4.9604072690582965,4.226830304460705,85.6629124380458,74.96412556053812,7.205947604437102,23.84446542364881,8.032893268588372,1.2770860986547086,883,27,177,14,19,288,135,223,0.17,0.736,0.094,-0.9487,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,2,0,6,14,3,2,13,0,16,12,10,4,1,30,32,13,0,3,11,0,2,2,0,2,2,1,1,1,17,3,0,1,4,1,0,2,4,8,0,2,3,3,17,6,27,26,5,33,0,2,0,0,6,15,0,7,17,113,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119972003823074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296791244610756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382703115836762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680525856381502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177885444072281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390768095225914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805732895876154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032245345130662,0.0,0.07649574760479085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861450131770565,0.0,0.0,0.0902189126564806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440910775179087,0.0,0.0,0.2809728973033883,0.0,0.11963782893468508,0.0,0.2803284165481291,0.0,0.10971619855453901,0.0,0.0,0.14624227246463226,0.0,0.0,0.1315166036585606,0.0,0.0,0.11911593246824567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144313074595403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712883887808946,0.1427883320913667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894579622783796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431476272473451,0.12631209977046995,0.13187850066229642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18241561294312772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11752670741850405,0.14062736969569956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890869281313452,0.13693563320226407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530923175718015,0.0,0.0,0.13463548436481554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290033354669956,0.0,0.0,0.11494686175850563,0.12803452888477976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19053981481698168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12685802108619573,0.0,0.20240348404184846,0.0,0.11764551108794333,0.1239207304457546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862456427426051,0.0,0.1068566187375235,0.07848579427242929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796724699984876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297486906108584,0.14596693890171367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wizman20,2020/03/04,"Gone from getting straight B's and occasional honor roll from not doing any of my assignments Last year was my freshman year of highschool. I got straight B's. Honor Roll on some quarters. Managed to get into advanced math. I also did, well... every other year. Something I don't know broke in my brain around October 2019. Nothing happened (that I'm aware) that could have cause this. My grades just started to dip. Hard. The sudden challenge of sophomore year just got to me perhaps? I just... stopped doing assignments. I miss school a bit, so the assignments just keep piling up until I just don't want to do them. First half of the semester being straight A's and B's switch to half F's by the second, I literally got a 0% in history... no tests or assignments completed. You see, if I was maybe in 7th grade I would be sitting on my bed in the fetal position sobbing, who dips this majorly?? But... I just don't care. People yelled at me, didn't care. School counselor threw me a bone by letting me turn stuff in super late, didn't care. Brother came over to help schedule all the work I have to do, tried caring but in the end I didn't. It just feels like I have the worst case of procrastination possible... Every single night. ""Oh, its 10 I should do homework, but wait lemme watch this video first... Oh it's 1 AM I should really get going, wow discord friends want to play minecraft for half an hour! Crap its 3am, I'm gonna go get an energy drink. Hmm, I'll watch more youtube while I drink it. Wtf its 5:30 now? I didn't get any sleep! Should I miss school again?"" This basically happens every night. I tried doing things to stop it. The thing is, alot of anti-procrastination measures can be undone. Uninstall the extension. Reinstall the app I deleted. Literally just fucking sit there and zone out because I would rather do that than do the assignment. And then.. my family doesnt care that much either. ""Oh we'll get you a therapist soon."" ""Don't worry dude we'll get this figured out sometime. "" ""Oh let's have a little chat about it but not actually do anything."" Over all, it just feels like theres nothing I can do to fix this. Nothing happens. No fucking change. Don't know how to escape this sedentary mentality....... Things started looking up 2nd semester but now I'm basically back where I was before. I'm gonna fucking throw away most of a year of high school and best case scenario have to do summer school.

I am clinically diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I have been given about 5 different meds, none working. Getting evaluated for ADHD on March 9th after my mom finally decided to do at least something. I'm expecting just ending up being given more meds that don't work.

The fuck do I even do. Has anyone else just had their brains completely switch like like this??? Is it just hormones, will my head stop being in the clouds once I grow a bit more? Googling leads to no situation like mine. Basically at a loss. I know I'm not alone, though... right?",2.300473790322581,4.8401002951388925,3.4387813620071697,86.95532258064517,80.77083333333333,6.493906810035843,24.568100358422946,7.717688229018142,1.4205467965949827,2334,88,455,40,62,752,289,576,0.09699999999999999,0.7809999999999999,0.122,0.9423,1,1,4,0,0,0,114.0,2,2,2,13,30,31,5,0,26,0,60,14,6,3,2,65,114,20,0,11,24,2,3,5,1,10,2,1,2,0,29,12,2,5,7,5,0,9,18,12,1,7,18,8,47,19,57,78,18,74,0,6,4,4,12,30,6,5,38,286,76,23,0.0,0.0,0.062182776794526426,0.0,0.0765805949239213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599602813152669,0.0,0.0509578841185662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08666531018278381,0.0,0.0487466043322544,0.0,0.0,0.044555400153739,0.06528998098315952,0.052437183545698936,0.05672544836648302,0.0,0.0,0.059868239577543086,0.048997730582845074,0.0,0.03884390048594755,0.0,0.05422211547993045,0.0,0.06687155144535151,0.0,0.1391342668878625,0.0,0.0,0.1422680434173886,0.0,0.07288016809715345,0.3248404557718512,0.06545930678350655,0.06740866447069575,0.0,0.1336210982167972,0.0,0.0,0.0508762565574481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05488304458009238,0.06467575727400063,0.0,0.06657517459557928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484518974555375,0.0,0.0,0.05323095240715645,0.0,0.11287628015070472,0.0,0.0,0.04208730407751155,0.0,0.16106377852566955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0600707511746924,0.0,0.06443878695509556,0.0910449894785413,0.0,0.06980354691699188,0.0,0.10840257542026042,0.0,0.0,0.04923090240107842,0.2356371840767873,0.2663339079236666,0.0,0.07242854308700128,0.0,0.15289118457025447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690455508060892,0.0,0.057081750212347925,0.0,0.06539641625940662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042711030398460116,0.06732503023272185,0.0,0.0,0.06275262453996268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05663840095137807,0.0,0.0,0.10505864611721474,0.05194134748120121,0.0718803786727637,0.0,0.0,0.13031865088140007,0.0,0.1556549921564455,0.06386546214487436,0.0,0.0,0.05350982608615543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401658988471504,0.0,0.14155995297029486,0.0,0.0642160622356921,0.0,0.0,0.07462959230157556,0.0,0.0,0.046842472227284826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959620824807934,0.0,0.18342685848542656,0.0,0.0,0.06786108292907489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044176311882326236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183616823132838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04082148326365631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05441762444498345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3224466833746282,0.05077760966418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162538786852264,0.06376729815123182,0.0,0.0,0.09811150805251148,0.06302197468075191,0.0,0.0902044990694142,0.0,0.0,0.1598215284985784,0.0,0.0,0.07294561973655697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398531670675174,0.12700075983663167,0.0,0.06260583348511514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865251318831495,0.06931045396697746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516892310935168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057293082803391016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916955097153255,0.06471205234060662,0.0,0.0905315372734286,0.0,0.0,0.20517207376406446
mentalhealth,ihavenoidea6668,2020/03/04,"Weird intrusive thoughts about bread slicer [seriously] Strange thing is happening to me. Now like three days in row I've been having intrusive thoughts about... bread slicer. I know it sounds hilarious but I am serious.

It's like... I have a picture how I am using bread slicer and suddenly I cut my finger and it hurts and I am bleeding and it's horrible. Or maybe the mat holding the disc is yanked and the disc cut my throat and I bleed to death.

Note: I am not scared of the bread slicer (I use it normally) and I have no bad experience like being cut when I was child or anything.

But for some reason, this picture comes to my mind several times a day.

How to get rid of it?!

Thanks",1.0983088235294112,3.631082213235299,2.3667647058823533,92.34294117647059,87.16176470588232,6.435294117647058,21.970588235294123,7.724431198458867,1.074585294117647,535,19,115,11,17,171,80,136,0.22399999999999998,0.6859999999999999,0.09,-0.9658,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,6,13,3,1,6,0,12,8,2,5,0,25,21,14,1,1,5,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,0,1,8,8,4,1,4,0,0,1,2,9,0,1,4,2,15,4,10,16,1,8,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,3,9,70,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17216558699997755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17468524657500722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18021964073651084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26985190072265364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046517831519093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930586488239484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18500756216817613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22396829287017095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497873744769918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066346963971077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21018393876234046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112468570799222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049856463592704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151072003588048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20946006594255914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236352669351805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19261646818978626,0.0,0.0,0.13899272035756466,0.0,0.0,0.33218565497294383,0.12199457218696047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613880573000577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,m155h,2020/03/04,"I am scared of my parents Ok so let me explain

I had a good childhood for the most part, but when I was 10 my parents relationship got really bad, because of money problems in the 2008 recession  and my mental health declined ever since then.
My parents divorced in 2015 after 7 years of basically just verbally abusing each other.
I first lived with my mom for about 3 years but because she has some health problems (diabetes and multiple correlated illnesses) she couldn't take care of me anymore so she kicked me out and since then I live with my father.
But I just can't talk to him, I've been struggling  with depression, agoraphobia  and social anxiety for almost a decade now. I am not able to talk to anyone seriously  about my problems and every other week my depression becomes so bad that I can't get up/ can't go to work because my anxiety gets unbearable  when the depression becomes worse. 
On the days that I can't go to work/ get out of the house I have a friend park my car on the other side of town and I hide in my room because I am scared of seeing my dad and talking to him.
Can anyone help me/ give me advice?",4.92781763826607,5.833892394618835,5.923695067264577,79.07179073243651,69.0,8.995994020926759,31.010164424514198,9.21078282632365,2.672141644245142,896,36,171,17,15,297,122,223,0.26899999999999996,0.687,0.044000000000000004,-0.9959,3,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,11,16,0,3,9,1,15,4,0,0,1,28,26,17,0,4,6,6,0,0,1,0,4,0,1,0,5,13,0,0,1,0,1,3,6,12,0,1,4,1,34,4,30,20,4,27,0,3,1,0,21,11,0,3,13,120,39,2,0.10178376350909513,0.12059711595410005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946191570007756,0.0,0.0,0.1019217365201816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572860098009175,0.0,0.10094214328789364,0.1423391480718766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699703820389048,0.2481857500496287,0.22482434010325772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377533042976217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564210710270188,0.0,0.26299861909552186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920692413244098,0.08575721065413636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657721724457662,0.0,0.0,0.07863788320158484,0.0,0.15953344639075842,0.0976402605949486,0.1156921168199386,0.08537139173347791,0.08140577380197317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163827619736184,0.0,0.0,0.06822351117049344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744479733981715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040807942490118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17975385588704626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025740938204992,0.0,0.0,0.11920791365921901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3390564722416218,0.1102218971250041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29217994644205514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520528522614563,0.0,0.0,0.10927767049863374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20380660718742494,0.0,0.08110848152846338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839316195822726,0.0,0.0,0.10375572896593699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640648924407403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765287230131782,0.24542980082452134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164479558502524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819958414678788,0.0,0.10372635064595637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109081317617302
mentalhealth,HonoredHeretic,2020/03/04,"What's wrong with me?!? So my dog passed away earlier last night...

Now why in posting here is like I'm sad but I feel totally calm. Havent cried once and in just like eh it happened whatever moving on. I shouldn't be like that. I've known this dog since I was 5 (I'm 18 now) and I feel like I should be feeling something more.

I do have a couple anxiety disorders and PTSD but I dont think they'd be repelling my sense of emotion. Idk anyone got ideas?",-0.34493127147766245,1.8154881752577336,1.6738402061855702,97.45928264604817,89.9278350515464,5.295189003436427,19.423539518900345,6.816661863887847,0.14673951890034376,351,11,83,5,12,116,70,97,0.08,0.708,0.212,0.9312,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,0,1,0,12,0,0,0,1,16,20,6,0,2,3,0,3,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,6,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,2,3,11,5,6,12,2,11,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,8,45,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599587916318135,0.0,0.0,0.13344323991421778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17930513090717975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21116632862185164,0.20963423740725606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187248688720166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236688827023939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21467490345296414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894908522118293,0.13633968421393325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15263615598392882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16876357609336856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21544074063134885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556412173351405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729488482295257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20283799975830832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790950755128605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20324366381845274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18277672618526025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22308755633939195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786893075795544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469217812231714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228575035733158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17220790077407302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086590146048433,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alksdfadf,2020/03/04,i can't study math without self harming I'm in 9th grade and doing Algebra 1 which everyone says is so easy but no matter how hard I try it doesn't make sense. I pay attention in class but still don't understand and when I try teaching myself at home I just get so stressed out from the fact that I'm having breakdowns trying to learn stuff everyone else learned at the beginning of the year. I just can't learn math without scratching my arms up and sobbing and punching myself and pulling my hair. Is there any way to remain calm when I'm doing math?? I never selfharm except when I'm frustrated. The end of course test is in June and I still don't understand what we were learning in August. if algebra 1 is this hard how am i going to survive geometry and calculus??? (literally),3.9401923076923056,5.480346737179488,4.986410256410256,82.4669230769231,72.01282051282051,8.276923076923078,29.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.412382051282051,625,26,121,12,12,205,96,156,0.126,0.81,0.064,-0.9127,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,1,12,5,1,1,4,0,14,2,2,3,2,30,24,17,0,1,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,6,9,0,0,7,0,1,2,9,4,0,0,1,5,14,1,17,23,0,22,0,1,0,0,3,8,1,1,11,79,20,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12099364898782895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14863172259478633,0.0,0.15758684750336538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34002584319202744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295735312349453,0.0,0.1011176640398079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187678776773477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17847113987906665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876489354224087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722508157752572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414914030259488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185612351043998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841788585923597,0.0,0.2038100399656187,0.0,0.20367911199971475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3623938371748335,0.0,0.0,0.3704479531345414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122688808735676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430225840677207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457649120626162
mentalhealth,jeanvaljean1444,2020/03/04,"I feel humiliated and ashamed. My self confident is dead I met a girl on an internet platform and when we chatted for a few days, we realized that we had many common interests. Our conversations were very fun, we had a lot of fun. Meanwhile, we did not see each other and once said she was not interested in appearance. yesterday she asked me for my phone number and we sent our photos to each other. the girl was really beautiful, just like a model. I am not ugly or handsome, I am an average man. Before seeing my photo, the girl, who was warm blooded, started to act distantly after seeing my photo. I met a girl on an internet platform and when we chatted for a few days, we realized that we had many common interests. Our conversations were very fun, we had a lot of fun. Meanwhile, we did not see each other and once said he was not interested in appearance. yesterday he asked me for my phone number and we sent our photos to each other. the girl was really beautiful, just like a model. I am not ugly or handsome, but an average man. Before seeing my photo, the girl, who was warm blooded, started to act distantly after seeing my photo. Although she responded to the messages immediately in advance, she was writing late and giving short answers. I stopped writing when I noticed this and when I woke up in the morning I saw that she deleted my number (She's WhatsApp profile photo was disappeared). I feel really really humiliated. Am i too sensitive or are people insensitive?

By the way, we were not living in the same cities, so it was not possible to establish an emotional relationship, we just had a good time. I would understand if we thought of an emotional relationship and she didn't like me. It's just so thoughtless to treat someone you chat with just because of its appearance. By the way, a funny note: the girl was a psychology student :)",5.1067247079568014,6.7442729025788,6.6856876790830935,71.03751102049814,69.25787965616045,10.068371170376901,32.62078465946661,10.302915286807345,3.7994530747189774,1469,67,249,41,26,504,138,349,0.071,0.767,0.163,0.9805,0,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,19,1,0,1,12,18,0,1,27,0,28,2,2,0,0,65,54,22,1,2,18,0,4,3,0,1,0,2,0,10,13,30,0,1,7,3,0,9,9,1,0,0,30,13,51,17,28,23,9,39,0,0,7,0,63,11,0,9,20,192,64,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029318264359356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616214990250406,0.0,0.1847111998297836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13999266047069125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441753498531101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975748132196242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041170100492998,0.0,0.09103431306795468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243261694372393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15907468810224384,0.0,0.09583871399847647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18454576874077167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22007564558803105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356823015522345,0.0,0.2311732387906815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524475483494797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235731405660633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781221310058359,0.0,0.0,0.2330527232955571,0.0,0.0,0.20648396914243508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5189317931922455,0.0,0.11322605430328625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196166086839992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15364377713484104,0.0,0.0,0.09074042336879157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616495471280114,0.06328784298980737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298914059929728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791060824531497,0.0,0.17230063850516872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710040785110671,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gincli,2020/03/04,"I feel terribly trapped To be fair, I don’t even know why I am posting this, but at this point nothing really matters to me anymore.

Long story short, I’ve been dealing with depression and anxiety for most of my life.
I grew up with an alcoholic and abusive father. Countless days of being beaten and verbally abused, going to school while not even being able to sit down due to the belt marks on my body. Would go to school just to be bullied that I was not as wealthy as most kids in my class, fat, and ugly.
Bullying went on during most of my school years until close to graduating, but scars were already made: i was became anorexic due to starving myself. My confidence was 0.

My only refuge was music and performing and my parents decided to force me to quit because they never agreed with the idea of following an art path compared to a “stable and secure” one. I started contemplating suicide more and more.

Years passed, I moved out for uni. I got my first full time job and got into streaming. I hated the uni i went to so I dropped it in my last year. First year of college was summed up in being a straight up alcoholic. 

I never had any stable relationships for longer than 6 months and I would always be the one getting dumped, to the point where my parents would start mocking me for having mental issues, hence me deciding not even trying to open up to them.

Last year I was living a very monotone life: going to work, getting home, stream, sleep, repeat. I have decided to make a change in my life and moved in a different country to start from scratch.

Things didn’t go as planned, ended up unable to find a job for 8 months, period of time in which streaming was my only income and i could barely make the rent money but nothing else for myself, barely something to eat. I had a couple of miserable factory jobs but I was too weak physically to keep up. I wanted to kill myself so badly but for some reason I didn’t.

After those 8 months I finally got a stable job, can’t say I love it, but it’s a stable income. I’m still not happy. I hate myself, I hate my body.

During this time I met a guy for which I have fallen like I never did before. He gave me a reason to go keep going, although there is a distance between us. I went to his country for New Years. Was supposed to be there for 5 days. Out of 5 days I only got to spend like 12 hours with him cause out of nowhere he decides to ghost me. So I spent my holiday sitting alone in my airbnb in a foreign country. 

At this point I feel beyond salvation. I don’t see the point of seeking therapy. Knowing all my past and current traumas I will most definitely end up on pills and I will only feel beyond tempted to overdose and put everything to an end.

I can’t focus on my work for more than few minutes anymore, my will to do anything productive is 0. I am just a walking dead.

That’s about it (although there are way more fucked up details in the background which I chose not to mention).",4.293782968168664,5.273866662711868,5.262195121951219,82.9658515915668,70.5084745762712,7.722199255890862,28.62753203803225,7.933642134475585,1.8235742042166176,2321,84,452,29,41,762,279,590,0.183,0.738,0.079,-0.9974,11,2,3,0,1,2,60.0,1,0,2,8,17,19,8,1,25,0,43,14,4,6,4,72,83,31,4,5,13,3,4,2,0,6,8,1,2,2,15,25,4,3,13,2,4,17,14,14,0,4,27,6,71,5,97,42,12,104,0,2,1,2,19,40,1,5,44,313,86,13,0.06327107056621498,0.14993174491788264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352350649480414,0.0,0.06552974755010094,0.06982119970465604,0.0,0.05264659925087654,0.0,0.0,0.04302649764248501,0.0,0.04840219580261872,0.0,0.12549580111571731,0.0,0.0,0.05206670003139882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05282870108840639,0.03856945735631959,0.0,0.053839020917304206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055979191445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499681829001858,0.06693240321448972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05051680143325343,0.07000823614652131,0.0,0.1224138186904133,0.0652296955303821,0.05449528036667306,0.0,0.0,0.06610480218078665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474210082932108,0.052854860691624886,0.0,0.16811816601891855,0.0,0.0,0.12536983615592015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056863958482732575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597526308371036,0.0,0.0,0.06931036513979208,0.057828612245430726,0.10763668060316216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058493085202017486,0.06611304590742638,0.0,0.21575044491104006,0.0,0.20241462021638573,0.0,0.0,0.06264830732409682,0.0,0.06735323113851238,0.0,0.18740124940181624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634660425856792,0.0,0.0623092595211138,0.0,0.0,0.07142533728807822,0.0,0.06603855933092574,0.2511470986024857,0.11247646929867876,0.07000006519251675,0.0,0.06954425140349442,0.10314873437752288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13407068486631976,0.06182209826686344,0.0,0.05586951448971652,0.05599290642662228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710461145353185,0.059868616800238014,0.08446786182172655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376235761612838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150709465418746,0.1344942697942822,0.0,0.0,0.14639565047531924,0.0611075942198463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214205972769858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574822976768769,0.19248200107696092,0.0,0.0,0.14051007247480174,0.0,0.06039939612631475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392464508096235,0.0,0.060596195863120386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360490150599851,0.0,0.06729657173718784,0.0,0.0,0.040533067953072696,0.13010639664798232,0.0,0.0679294512509632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050315694829075504,0.0,0.192101103882761,0.05041885150815223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633167641766925,0.0,0.0,0.04870916126670277,0.0,0.0,0.13435076820353992,0.0,0.050528358684753014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920828188913891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235598332094358,0.0,0.04203448786432774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068161017889357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042956903692310235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610730752971291,0.0,0.0,0.05220525949968236,0.03731891671686588,0.050221630789541685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17595874890183674,0.057092300000524114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212418585403603,0.0,0.0,0.13483785958362093,0.0,0.0,0.24446697012665464
mentalhealth,marytheangel,2020/03/04,"ASAP i dont know how to calm my bf down, he's talking in his sleep I'm on the phone with my boyfriend, he started talking to himself in his sleep? Or he's having a really bad psnic attack. He doesn't respond to anything I say. I can't wake him up, I've thought about ending the call and recalling and hoping the ringer wakes him up but I'm  scared it won't so I'm staying on the call. 
Here's some of what he says:
Please dont do it (multiple times)
Calm down i dont want you to hurt yourself
Take it away
Please dont tell him 
You dont have to hurt yourself 
You have to calm down
I dont wanna hurt you
Look how burden you are (bf's name)
Everything is fine 
Don't break down (multiple times) 
Burden (multiple times)
You're pathetic (bf's name) 
You're fucking useless 
They really fucking hate you (multiple times) 
I don't know what to do, I've been trying to talk to him and calm him down but idk if he even hears anything I say
he started crying now and I'm really scared I dont know what to do, someone please help me I don't know how to wake up him up",-0.3511832611832588,1.7149564502164552,1.8453679653679664,97.07059163059164,88.3939393939394,5.153823953823954,18.94516594516595,6.605766666666668,-0.03386176046176058,824,24,196,10,27,276,100,231,0.221,0.672,0.107,-0.9872,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,6,1,0,8,19,4,2,5,0,22,7,5,3,0,23,41,12,0,4,4,0,0,0,3,1,0,4,0,0,6,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,13,13,0,0,2,5,28,6,29,38,1,24,0,4,1,2,41,14,2,4,8,106,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346643092730578,0.0,0.0,0.09308381231995172,0.07687402893290082,0.0,0.0683175670589158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670978782528866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987711812951085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6712596372051423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246959729711495,0.0,0.0,0.054042354580541935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353592302749297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512853879971195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078182982080326,0.0,0.0,0.09221882063191066,0.0,0.05484325261230564,0.0,0.0,0.08126724976535005,0.0,0.0,0.262774948094866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17986791122763338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870948515888227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26944643657028433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15725091839871133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19520331475776215,0.16383526808088278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16376125831130986,0.0,0.06932712415095213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582741233535618,0.08721087346573086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06151961422536888,0.19729516019147056,0.07151563118330727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495716210893472,0.190843188640496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05555145381544945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04826046340045433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jim_C-137,2020/03/04,"Been having this weird phenomenon lately... I’ve been unsure about revealing this to anyone close to me, at the cost of sounding insane. But for quite some time now i have had very frequent deja vu. Perhaps even increasingly frequent.

I get the sensation that i’ve lived through moments before. But it happens so much these days that it almost feels like a sense of time travel or looking into the future.

At some points it feels a bit difficult to distinguish whether i have a memory of something or one of my “premonitions” into the future.

At the same time, my thoughts of questioning whether my memories are just that or fabricated means i’m starting to feel a bit unsure of which memories are real and how much i’m forgetting or making up.

I realize this probably doesn’t make much sense, and sounds crazy. But i just wanted to talk about it to someone other than myself.",6.263876185164532,7.52554766871166,6.5498271054099275,74.49638594534302,66.17791411042944,9.608254322364752,31.99609592861127,9.800150414767053,3.2239496932515337,702,28,119,15,11,226,100,163,0.094,0.892,0.013999999999999999,-0.8642,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,9,0,9,0,0,3,0,35,23,13,0,1,11,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,13,5,0,0,9,1,1,2,1,2,0,1,4,6,10,1,23,19,9,22,0,0,1,0,2,8,0,8,13,88,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671158858612948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669312962531578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14201080740888342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3644005661546309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763002331791972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022904548832764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531532774849755,0.11922600540333556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719295846775497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14757997388069294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18825880402902628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153385723779806,0.0,0.14736662604644232,0.0,0.14014528093461273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228002859827268,0.0,0.0,0.1817917635242036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3680493047797321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308875176143815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577646708201206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17993527867874454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869546120515173,0.17750769470579764,0.0,0.18995696820855504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140506609905756,0.12847981263104158,0.0,0.0,0.11812535928723428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413958586230054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249174712081235,0.2919441059480357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770144639010995,0.09843584456573293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,one-sad-sandwich,2020/03/04,"I’m schizoaffective this is how I feel 

I do t even know if I am depressed anymore I just want to feel at piece sorry about the bad grammar and punctuation but I have been dead before and I felt at piece no heaven no hell just felt ok in a strange way until I was shocked back to life is it really selfish if I want to feel ok again if people do t feel that way it’s on them I won’t recall any of it I just want to feel ok again and at piece I believe it is my time to move on and feel ok and if people are sad one day it will all go away I hate when people say it’s selfish to end it they might finally be at piece and that is ok let them do what they need to and be ok with their choice probably spelled wrong but fuck it I have had friends end it all and I wasn’t sad or mad I realized they have an illness and did what made them ok. Why am I mad about that someone I cared about is ok now and at piece I hate the stigma that suicide is selfish no it isn’t you don’t know what they may have been through let them do their thing and be ok with it just remember the good and maybe pour some out for your homie but don’t be mad at them it may be something you will never understand and just because you don’t doesn’t mean be sad or mad just love them and accept they may honestly be ok now mentall illness is a preoblem that many might not understand but we deserve to feel ok and if you don’t agree that is not my problem or anyone’s with the disorder just accept it and know they aren’t trying to hurt you they just wanted to feel comfortable if I’m gone tomorrow or a long time from now just know it’s not your fault or anyone else’s it’s just the cards I was dealt it could be so much worse than what I have but maybe I am weak and can’t handle what I have I don’t know if it’s my mental health or what but it’s more than I might be able to handle maybe I’m having an episode and I’ll wake up tomorrow and won’t do what I want to but just know that comparing someone’s situation to another’s is fucked one person might handle depression might be just as bad as you even though you weren’t dealt the same cards life is a trip just enjoy what you had or have but if someone passes from suicide done be mad at them maybe they are ok now and it’s something you may not understand but be at piece with it and move the fuck on I’m rambling at this point maybe someone will relate I’m not sure anyways I don’t know anymore but I want to just feel ok I just want to feel nothing it’s better than what I know now I doubt anyone will read this far but I’m not even depressed I have a new job on the way in a few days and my life will be ok but I know my depression will kick in or something else and all will go to shit again like it always has and maybe it’s ok if I am just at free it will all be ok for you and me anyone suffering I don’t know how long I have but maybe I will make it if I don’t ohh well it’s not that scary",0.3812219708890616,2.027131657012198,2.153219905586152,98.47034028324154,82.27743902439025,5.512745869394177,18.812352478363493,6.453848037991606,-0.3000167387883561,2301,54,578,21,62,757,206,656,0.231,0.621,0.149,-0.9979,3,0,3,0,0,2,1.0,1,12,17,1,38,63,12,1,16,16,91,13,2,4,6,147,143,64,3,20,54,0,12,1,1,20,7,1,0,1,47,31,0,0,30,1,1,7,27,32,1,2,14,13,73,32,55,92,15,56,2,9,0,4,34,22,5,29,25,401,120,2,0.05643644521158873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046959643445405735,0.0,0.0,0.03837871803204927,0.059178533588657926,0.0,0.0,0.11193957744937376,0.1578466988186158,0.05782580746981065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05302389805045972,0.04339614275384862,0.09424414879957048,0.03440313317683846,0.0,0.048023258134460664,0.06358454759931058,0.0,0.049913449530576665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575407171851181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045059909226111056,0.0,0.0,0.0727936765817043,0.0,0.1944345102544324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468105563679429,0.0,0.0,0.05775407776671498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429081641561003,0.0,0.09997187846611004,0.0,0.0,0.11182721939238888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853596242442328,0.0,0.10837567563917506,0.06182336713764708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043602657573818086,0.15652375258005372,0.0,0.0,0.0641482647842723,0.04733621263447362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114386111462059,0.0,0.05998930217276322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06041638184532901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056004463586147635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101599434773921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154201778299957,0.11958819083074787,0.027571996415422857,0.0,0.0,0.0998889561217906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05093609522939208,0.053401529035363035,0.037671765414914606,0.057217697394210426,0.39688596352195704,0.061475833746266986,0.0,0.0,0.11374932555940875,0.2993507489600617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996601955034238,0.04148728089113075,0.041846909020792335,0.04352726574366388,0.05450667046310198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05415229127986386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648559172410929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737777529568914,0.04927812710358902,0.0,0.0,0.05335068259613971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084803328105666,0.05400205615907985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645171771516904,0.0,0.03615463194031483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393149079723995,0.0,0.0,0.044880526425301666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057931199996185914,0.0,0.06343692901218656,0.0,0.0,0.19127366753836852,0.13034259827738334,0.0,0.06317597989455005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346462211152165,0.0,0.05319068171402788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03749386647203429,0.0,0.055448520876902566,0.0,0.06581709010549491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03831664171311,0.0,0.0,0.17625698941021095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330137432256928,0.1343898699259909,0.0,0.0,0.05074314198981535,0.0,0.0509251136759439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057513559171011225,0.0,0.06170439329727832,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wysa_ai,2020/03/04,"Self-Care not Self-Harm It was Self Harm Awareness a few days ago and we are raising awareness to redirect ones' energy from self-harm to self-care. Let's start a conversation. Name one activity that you would suggest to do every time one gets the urge to self harm. #selfcarenotselfharm

For example - meditation, painting your nails etc.",4.129214285714287,7.304673683333334,4.076190476190476,81.10500000000003,78.83333333333334,8.095238095238095,26.904761904761905,8.841846274778883,2.6319761904761902,271,11,47,7,7,83,45,60,0.11800000000000001,0.846,0.036000000000000004,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,7,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,3,0,6,4,2,4,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,4,26,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646509333229264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200798019971737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591106698157419,0.0,0.0,0.12020253596527215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453726896034492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14588598811203868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900231918228557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8929925778167429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097996249876147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831898841712222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134606735958024,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Amangetdigital,2020/03/04,"All about Anxiety Disorders and Depression among the Elderly  It  is normal to feel anxious when faced with gruesome situations once in a  while. However, anxiety disorders involve frequent episodes of extreme  anxiety with increasing intensity in everyday situations. It often  results in panic attacks that include shortness of breath but doesn’t  engage any danger and usually lasts for prolonged periods resulting in  clinical depression.

Symptoms  pertaining to anxiety disorders and depression among the elderly may be  evident from the onset of a chronic illness, disease, or loneliness.  Anxiety disorders can be treated with the assistance of a psychologist,  or a professional aide can be employed under the[ ](https://www.servelder.com/eldercare.php)[**ElderCare**](https://www.servelder.com/eldercare.php) program launched by [ServElder](https://www.servelder.com/home.php).

A  major proportion of the elderly suffer from anxiety disorders and  depression, but only a few receive careful treatment. Often the symptoms  seen in the elderly are confused with the myriad physiological  disorders that they might suffer from. Therefore, diligent companionship  can be utilized to treat their condition with a rather sensitive  approach.[ ](https://www.servelder.com/eldercare.php)[**ElderCare**](https://www.servelder.com/eldercare.php) assists you take care of your loved ones, which employ a professional staff with the most considerate methodology.

You may like this also -[**Why should you find a trained caregiver for the elder one**](https://www.servelder.com/blog-details.php?id=15)

​

You  can have one or a combination of anxiety disorders. If symptoms are  prevalent and prolonged, consultation with a psychiatrist is imperative  for a thorough medical treatment.

Common symptoms relevant to anxiety disorders or depression include-

* Gastrointestinal issues
* Hyperventilation
* Palpitations
* Experiencing feelings of restlessness or tension
* Rapid heart rate
* Insomnia
* Trembling or sweating
* Trouble concentrating

You  can also see a doctor if these symptoms are increasingly interfering  with your daily life or a post-trauma is upsetting you. You must seek  immediate medical attention if you have suicidal tendencies or  behaviour. The professional aide from[ ](https://www.servelder.com/eldercare.php)[**ElderCare**](https://www.servelder.com/eldercare.php) nurtures patients with compassion and kindness inducing healing in a healthier manner.

It  is difficult to deal with a horrific trauma alone, and there is no  shame in admitting that you need help. Consult a doctor or an [**ElderCare**](https://www.servelder.com/eldercare.php) nurse and see the kind of wonders therapeutic sessions will do.

Anxiety  disorders are usually caused by some traumatic event an individual has  endured, which comes crashing back in adulthood in the form of an  anxiety disorder. It can also occur due to stress accompanied by a  prolonged illness among the elderly. The behaviour of extreme alcoholism  and substance abuse can also result in major anxiety disorders followed  by treatment through a rehabilitation center.

We have enlisted for you a few ways to ensure prevention from anxiety disorders and depression.

* It can be prevented by leading a simple and healthy life.
* A good diet, communication, and exercise can render your mind free from all kinds of stress and worries.
* You can also pick up a hobby and devote your time to self-introspection and ways to achieve happiness.

As  the world is getting busier driven by technology, people are getting  lonelier, deserted, and anxiety disorders have become more prevalent.  Ultimately, it is companionship one seeks instead of dealing with  everything alone, and [**ElderCare**](https://www.servelder.com/eldercare.php) can render just the kind of assistance you require.

You can always contact [ServElder](https://www.servelder.com/home.php) and garner further information about anxiety disorder, depression, and their causes from an expert.",13.143096049428939,17.756779645871557,10.009406478187607,43.11048492791613,54.37614678899082,13.916869500093618,48.553641640142295,12.39828928493749,8.607590900580417,3357,204,302,129,49,982,283,545,0.253,0.648,0.099,-0.9986,4,2,2,0,1,0,212.0,1,17,3,4,15,39,2,9,45,0,42,25,4,10,3,84,59,41,1,8,16,0,2,1,0,6,19,0,0,0,13,32,2,3,9,1,1,8,2,23,0,3,2,6,21,17,70,46,12,42,0,9,3,1,34,19,0,21,14,250,34,15,0.0,0.04983933795816945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04495396294781956,0.0,0.08713189421631201,0.0,0.16819409797121393,0.035000881952649,0.04557667055471954,0.0511127500635465,0.028605178420816512,0.0,0.45050722969756796,0.04752070576582705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04785423388193223,0.0,0.032344863765705625,0.0,0.0,0.04645673397319642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577475048372056,0.08642328266735448,0.0,0.03623468499065372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673292883312413,0.2536095458323596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6749309316556796,0.08610922298047664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03780469634382546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042537965748553064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03844602423496773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0439537396197033,0.0,0.0,0.03528155388213016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0447782482772485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04984641889807974,0.0281948254153384,0.0,0.08438788055265192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04390421893065116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752140550313984,0.0,0.03428803310075832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05942254303334681,0.020550500832848446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037964688942442544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475074920017613,0.0,0.04462359361381926,0.04247296959573788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031190158511803838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04121410015622645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04479712542243069,0.11401548097895385,0.03199180903214845,0.0,0.04935341345025159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02916210143833556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04028598861776171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703963009711758,0.0,0.04388225715264512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456411083595406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636906740050004,0.0,0.0,0.04601153614888194,0.0,0.0,0.21860466067486056,0.0316271318728104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024528041869903358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092655806087866,0.0,0.0,0.06677739476990073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037956503955766836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0456169581029589,0.0,0.04271835638218238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0511127500635465,0.0
mentalhealth,lostinthemasses,2020/03/04,"Body Dysmorphia Due to Parent's Resemblance? I don't really know how to overcome this. It seems the older I get, the more I seem to resemble my father, at least the way he looked when he was most present in my life (and the most abusive). At first I just grew to hate looking at myself in the mirror, but now I'm genuinely starting to feel an underlying self-loathing because of it. I genuinely try to exhibit personality traits at complete odds with his; an empathetic, selfless, reliable person to those in need, kind to animals, and level-headed during times of stress, but there's a voice in my head constantly berating my actions for not being enough. 

I'm starting to think it's the main reason I have issues with courting romantic prospects as well, he was always a cheating misogynistic womanizer, and I just try to avoid anything other than polite conversation with women in public these days for fear they'll think any kind of flirting or showing interest romantically would be rude or make them feel objectified. It's been over 2 years since the last time I've gone on a date.

Anyone else have this issue? Any advice?",8.413311688311687,7.988743976190477,8.487835497835496,68.212012987013,61.61904761904761,11.636363636363635,36.70995670995672,11.022393298168332,4.123619047619048,905,37,155,21,11,296,143,210,0.09699999999999999,0.763,0.14,0.8658,1,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,2,1,7,11,3,3,12,0,10,3,2,3,0,28,28,10,0,2,7,2,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,4,9,6,0,1,8,1,0,3,2,6,1,1,4,5,15,5,32,20,6,31,0,0,2,0,14,12,0,6,15,99,24,0,0.0,0.15696519027303246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945631741910835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11023260581897353,0.0,0.0,0.18017965155901602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09263194763673724,0.1357397325299989,0.10901840009657154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075757693579988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14715358975294626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13890103702887496,0.14316204034580898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543758073965847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066866819777801,0.0,0.0,0.13688555669545238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907498303737532,0.1339700758696556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268602296656018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921447379987884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307949506662555,0.27192202900968754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765459719397785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759116454315273,0.07280664051448073,0.10798754277726848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935733815481778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22249690905975214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884303321492402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823102324433744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14710153792557026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23134998317533625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486902793118854,0.13620981545152006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412066417304271,0.1382038190265734,0.0,0.0,0.10958746607800653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18753772619175735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15175351058685854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16977356411761646,0.0,0.0,0.1544983909042156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798882168762003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10515515359365593,0.0,0.0,0.1191139531432443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941088239725058,0.0,0.0,0.08531171856993727
mentalhealth,MystyChan,2020/03/04,"Having a bad night I'm feeling overwhelmed and I can't express myself at home. It's 3am, and I don't know where else to go to right now.",-1.6809374999999989,0.1615377812500043,1.1737500000000018,100.89625,93.0625,3.2,17.375,3.1291,-1.0805250000000002,107,3,27,0,4,37,27,32,0.129,0.772,0.099,-0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,7,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,3,7,0,6,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775109299911577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3776978650460758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286112793261465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25695675969795617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4535247747106953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24847965672047925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4242947991743293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3861178439292054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,evensobro,2020/03/04,"How do you feel about anti-depression and anti-anxiety drugs? I have been seeing a therapist on-and-off. I'm an anxious person in general, but I was felt very depressed about two years ago and that's when I decided to get professional help.

While therapy did help me a lot, due to external triggers I've started feeling recently that I'm sleeping into my old ugly patterns and just won't be able to have any control over my emotions any more.

The last time the topic came up, I asked my doctor to let me continue with the therapy instead of trying out anti-depression and anti-anxiety drugs for a while. Now I'm reconsidering drugs and if that would help me. I have never tried the drugs so I'm not sure what kind of impact they can have, or any side effects. I'll certainly discuss this with my doctor, but I wanted to get an idea in general of how you folks feel about it.",6.025428571428571,5.859902542857142,7.21557142857143,74.49992857142861,66.42857142857143,10.657142857142855,33.5,10.355215969177356,3.428828571428572,695,28,132,16,10,237,109,175,0.079,0.831,0.09,0.2076,0,0,4,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,1,2,10,4,0,0,9,0,13,7,1,5,3,35,28,15,0,3,6,0,4,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,6,10,0,1,7,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,5,5,16,3,20,19,2,22,0,1,1,0,9,7,0,3,14,87,22,3,0.11327902137145128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041501758075096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23110085710724515,0.0,0.17331628258168788,0.12797305055823952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059005934384625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295610225733132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705205477878007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927011653535649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318917568336218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5254708043272784,0.0,0.0,0.12742365210344114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718318305774903,0.0,0.10876562503935557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836722649479127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277856206179837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787822675849742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796266891290487,0.0,0.0923375215673118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158354742408193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630577307386903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736776471181533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188672773468882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891087208600982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184936752134324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026871374870864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133608301259342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017947437063648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067641370404415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25908886660571856,0.13152567479206434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06605390832745196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15381803936192467,0.0,0.11065714379432827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346705617028812,0.06681490176312274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047016664837765,0.0,0.0,0.07294797576461047
mentalhealth,shitslurpie,2020/03/04,"I feel I have wasted my life. I'm a 40 year old who's been divorced twice, is a father of two kids I dont get to see enough.  I'm an alcoholic, a drug addict, my sexual deviancy is pretty out there. I have the worst self esteem, I now have a stupid misdemeanor charge that, as odd as it may be, is now keeping me from finding employment, I'm virtually homeless, I live with my gf who's constantly on the verge of tossing me out cause of my anger issues. She makes me feel stupid and incompetent, which I am not but I'm sick of fighting.  She withholds sex from me as a punishment for my temper. I'm in a new city, no job, car broke down, no money, no kids, falling behind on child support, my folks and my siblings want nothing to do with me cause of my druggie past.  I'm feeling pretty alone right about now.   Pretty goddamn alone..but above all, I miss my kids.",3.609475655430714,4.2044398539325885,4.978146067415731,85.79152621722847,71.80898876404495,7.955805243445692,27.192883895131093,8.07648339933343,1.5411445692883898,666,22,144,9,12,223,109,178,0.24600000000000002,0.649,0.106,-0.9747,2,3,3,0,3,0,27.0,0,0,0,0,5,10,6,0,9,0,12,6,0,3,1,20,28,6,0,1,2,1,3,0,1,1,5,0,0,5,5,6,1,2,4,0,1,2,5,9,0,2,1,4,24,1,23,25,3,18,0,2,1,1,13,8,0,1,8,89,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17408604218566393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17066040892466114,0.0,0.16539103253918322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3280919365828164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725685269100231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871558896050848,0.0,0.18519009650455884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16500280952362242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422327027507397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14595407806610894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343161186894292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16667522649604805,0.1584680221960553,0.14194011185109146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279401000959052,0.0,0.0,0.14100949621166126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659454221452204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422992582534736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532271884598012,0.0,0.1675681494143985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244249922429245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4873874576177896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363746781449999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725252609889245,0.0,0.16659185217775768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18121470583867036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15599425863003502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418950018580877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283534354648168
mentalhealth,Mego2019,2020/03/04,"I feel small I was resting, closing my eyes not sleeping, and sudanly i feel small, but my body and surrounding feels big af. From my hands, my lips, my leg, its like im trapped in giant body. Anybody knows why?",3.7371428571428567,4.765244142857147,4.19857142857143,89.89642857142859,71.85714285714286,7.504761904761906,30.66666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.8238952380952391,162,7,35,2,3,51,31,42,0.105,0.821,0.07400000000000001,-0.3291,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,0,9,5,3,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,8,1,2,4,1,7,0,0,1,0,0,7,0,0,1,17,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.677270423691239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4624452427486862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293054684889018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754529859435802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14894116630509754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050842002299401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750923694764463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,supahsassy146,2020/03/04,"Please help ASAP: Medication that can cause aggression? My dad has mentioned being on medication that can make him agressive and irrational. He’s had multiple outbursts with me but I know he’s really stressed. He had his 2nd panic attack the other night and my mom had to calm him down. I want to understand what it could be. As far as I know he’s had concerns with blood pressure, heart, maybe liver?? But he’s very healthy, he works out and eats well (used to do a lot of weightlifting). One of his more recent blood tests had the doctor say “your blood pressure is that of a highschool boy” my dad is almost 50. He got laid off recently, and as far as I know he’s unemployed currently, my parents spare the details.

I’m under a lot of stress but I want to at least find something that will give me guidance so maybe I can reach out to another adult. I don’t know if this is the right subreddit but I’m desperate for help",2.290730676328504,4.5365907663043465,3.4031884057971027,88.87031400966184,78.83695652173913,6.914975845410629,24.352657004830927,7.984000788550335,1.3860033816425124,727,26,149,13,18,234,110,184,0.14300000000000002,0.75,0.107,-0.8791,4,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,1,2,9,2,5,7,0,18,9,5,3,0,28,31,14,0,4,5,4,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,2,8,8,1,0,6,1,0,0,1,7,1,1,6,2,18,2,23,21,4,14,0,0,0,0,24,10,0,4,4,90,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13842998301506385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449594073558376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15727090146329825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420132187890276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037545780243503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414971468967221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14145668006256235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635122116950392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261488743442634,0.0,0.0,0.1105652265108718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381813266846626,0.18532218572805373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038980445478286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23505780982827695,0.0,0.0,0.0922780011169588,0.0,0.2777665218940617,0.0,0.0,0.2785297275740949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190804853329124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297313042471146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367675553312813,0.0,0.0,0.1621978912620831,0.15350203432565934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517488484099509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856174192597684,0.0,0.2729957563403705,0.0,0.0,0.11805841500649318,0.0,0.10993605481425177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064258983437128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31671283549638624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391540973749994,0.0,0.11939721027375033,0.0,0.11406461322745826,0.16307812056380766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429668908907425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064225069505722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,recyclemyashes,2020/03/04,"My local crisis team is making me feel worse. For two weeks now, I have been under the crisis team’s care due to suicidal thoughts and tendencies including self harm. 

I was supposed to see someone on Saturday, but no one showed up or called. Apparently there was a miscommunication during shift change. 

I was supposed to see someone this past Monday. No one showed up or called, apparently there was miscommunication and 2 people called in sick, one left early, one didn’t show up. 

When it was rearranged for someone to come see me yesterday (specifically for dropping off food, medication, and a chat), it’s just clear to me they don’t really care. No one showed up or called. When I called two hours after, they said miscommunication during shift change and that they will send someone right away. The woman came, dropped my stuff off, and left. I stood there just watching her leave and yelled out “excuse me, could you please come in for a chat?” To which she said, “no, I’m sorry. I have four other patients to get to.” 

I called the crisis line and complained, told the woman how these visits (or lack thereof) are causing me to feel suicidal again, worthless, etc. I started crying on the phone with this woman and she told me “I have time. I will stay on the phone and talk with you.” After I went into more detail of how I’ve been feeling (such as self harming again, making plans), then asked if I could schedule a talk with a manager for tomorrow (today), she said “Okay, I’ll do that for you. Have a great night, bye.” And hung up. 

I just need some kind of guidance, help, whatever. What do I do now, when even the crisis team is falling part?


Extra things about yesterday:

The woman who dropped off my food and meds said that there was a miscommunication and that someone TRIED to call me the day before yesterday. When I said, no. I spoke to someone about this the day before AND today and was told “I am going to make this very obvious on the board to come see you”, all she did was chuckle and mention something about the food. 

When I called the 24/7 crisis line to talk about it, while I was talking about how I feel, the woman on the phone kept interrupting to tell me how she would feel. I had to yell at her to stop and to let me talk. 

And I’m only covering the past 4 days. What do you do when even the crisis team isn’t helping? I feel fucked.",4.49468301435407,5.796620234649128,4.885494417862841,84.64770334928231,70.33771929824562,7.632535885167465,25.221690590111642,8.00094639256281,1.2795666666666672,1841,52,370,24,33,583,199,456,0.18899999999999997,0.745,0.067,-0.9965,5,0,1,0,0,0,68.0,0,5,3,5,29,11,1,0,24,1,35,6,0,8,3,62,75,36,2,6,9,0,6,0,0,3,2,8,0,7,19,26,3,2,8,10,0,9,8,5,0,8,28,19,49,6,57,41,7,73,0,1,5,1,64,24,1,6,37,253,68,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056466126193078524,0.0,0.05674806923621058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279241163934599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.493403668102029,0.06908185131729334,0.12316426074955394,0.06204774517703004,0.1277910152527159,0.1560885283326066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644944798691744,0.0,0.06634689235315583,0.11685958833182375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06736229956542199,0.07978765577907405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832412362262041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21910884417737936,0.0,0.0,0.05583910321638685,0.031556663335713164,0.0,0.03432688188914744,0.0,0.0,0.06659154296078477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097009457117486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059482127874084224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289761683704811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639551956045733,0.13125020334540927,0.061763398048547885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095300594355238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709111599839257,0.06084694688323025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044786056433901496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05668158905240344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20464402912257487,0.04593714918743249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06540763793087945,0.11531783980470907,0.04187396227095745,0.0,0.0,0.06630139051376731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03869397822480364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051581525387500916,0.28727257974306114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19252487323532666,0.0,0.12602136949971407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070618643937236,0.04649910111872911,0.0,0.06761318976793504,0.04275164256315421,0.0643786822972873,0.0,0.05049735457215823,0.0,0.0,0.06914389179469345,0.13213624764327295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427373623647615,0.05279252364155332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040127274846210384,0.0,0.0,0.047951090685816135,0.035219900116341525,0.0,0.1145048422009583,0.1731452224892497,0.0,0.041007838291432216,0.0,0.1180046313770098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983657236702705,0.0,0.0,0.04844947662722238,0.0,0.0,0.055991682366226495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155306489823679,0.042906639492872316,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aveyang,2020/03/04,"The pen knife is sitting in front of me because i was using it to cut something earlier on. I am working at home and have a sudden crave from my core to cut myself just to feel it / to feel alive. I know I should not but the crave is so strong. The only thing holding me back would be the presence of wound and scars. 

I resorted to snapping my forearm with rubber bands but it does not fully curb the urge from within.

How should I deal with this? How do those who feel this deal with this?😔",1.876078431372552,3.609172098039217,2.828039215686278,94.97284313725493,78.01960784313725,5.31764705882353,21.13725490196079,5.82211442006289,-0.05408627450980319,382,10,85,2,9,121,68,102,0.031,0.89,0.079,0.7859,0,0,1,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,2,5,3,2,0,6,0,10,2,1,3,0,22,15,7,0,3,5,0,3,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,8,5,0,2,4,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,3,11,1,16,10,0,8,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,62,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21340998939550074,0.0,0.16918490493697086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5722600520625176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428758279514949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42099544235505787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27839376329271964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252791157930534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21108054978214386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213662710945982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438425948544776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397041699764428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20205134702986896,0.0,0.0,0.19715540066507845,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1995johnnylove,2020/03/04,"Keep the cat or lose my mind I had a lovely cat for about 3 years. He was my little homie, we took naps together all the time. I named him Angel. I was obsessed with him, he was rotten spoiled I didn’t care how expensive he was even though I couldn’t afford it. I wanted him so badly I risked getting kicked out from my apt by having him while having a no pet agreement. I didn’t mind the smell, the fur everywhere. I didn’t mind him being and doing what a cat does. But I slowly started disliking him. I felt bad because I knew it wasn’t him it was me. I tried to ignore the those feelings and still treat him like I always have. It went on for months I tried to get over it but one day I just couldn’t pretend anymore. I felt like everybody hated me for trying to find him a new home but I couldn’t help it I had so much happening, my mind was all over the place,I barely slept. I hated how I felt.  I was working full time, I took care of my baby, I did all the cleaning and on top of that I had to pick up after the cat. At first I was okay with it but I slowly started going insane in my head because no matter how much I cleaned I was never finished. I still feel bad for giving him up but I knew in my heart he deserved someone better. My life changed and things got way to complicated for me emotionally as well as physically. I don’t know how people do it with multiple pets and kids because I was going insane. Props for those people! It was nice while it lasted but no more cats for me.",1.1183806519453228,2.9524088138801265,2.9739022082018955,92.5615683491062,80.73501577287067,5.488496319663511,19.7149316508938,6.42735559955562,0.016983259726603528,1162,29,259,10,30,388,154,317,0.146,0.73,0.124,-0.8088,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,0,5,13,21,2,2,12,1,29,5,3,5,4,48,57,23,0,4,8,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,5,1,15,10,0,2,9,2,1,5,12,10,1,2,29,7,56,11,33,24,7,36,1,1,0,1,20,13,0,1,19,184,71,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547646057094348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187682631474032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25731635755307475,0.1878628865608208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085301096291684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20947249522520567,0.0,0.1086707404787702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624992620933963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989642452994527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555319297110545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784971241859611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10388294663526768,0.0,0.2958998989118475,0.0,0.09388992194755373,0.08737888692221887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734044063894628,0.0985443695363914,0.11676337857850012,0.0,0.08215955802510991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084047441569533,0.0,0.0,0.2028417882429914,0.10542675834583634,0.0,0.0,0.12173108852824148,0.06885523302467557,0.0,0.10304279409991153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130780173809024,0.0,0.0,0.056455654758437224,0.08373559595890005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255858100213737,0.10037370352715734,0.10295867922616224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492438575293284,0.0,0.0,0.09271444193511882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41489687212938414,0.0,0.0819951043796448,0.0,0.1510312118706401,0.0,0.07922880884785044,0.09921364232906156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960995852589592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243488019141692,0.0,0.10732705621174483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703960945003003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14542032222951415,0.0,0.1640746152757387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06824674899576141,0.0,0.10092800883298418,0.0,0.11980099282135767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22826526395831426,0.20923312067366467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060590597658525876,0.08153930747804701,0.0,0.0,0.09236322632178287,0.0952282532751944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747859258891416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615233028744684
mentalhealth,delusionalhero,2020/03/04,"How do I stop making up stories? Am a 30 year old guy, living with my mum since dad died recently. I had been diagnosed with anxiety, adhd, OCD and depression in 2018. 

But much before all of this, when I was about 16, I started making up stories just to get people to listen to me. 

As years passed by, I continued to make up stories when the people around me were silent.

And now I make up stories just so that I can entertain people and I feel good while doing it. But later, am just guilty of having made it up. 

Are my stories based on real life events? Yes. But extrapolated by quite a lot.

How long are my stories? I take a good 20+ mins with friends and over an hour when I narrate them to my mum. Because, I've to establish the characters, the timeline so as to make them feel it. 

How often do I narrate these stories? I've consciously kept a check on myself when I am with my friends. I've not faked a story in over a year now. 

With my mum, it's almost once in every 15 days. I try not to do it. But I start with it and keep going on till I've tried my best to make it feel real, so that she doesn't realise that I've lost my mental stability. 

I stopped seeing my psychiatrist ever since he discussed his political views with me. I didn't feel comfortable with his very conservative views. 

And I can't afford a psychiatrist now. 

Where and how can I start to help myself? 

How do I stop day dreaming (in which I spend hours on almost everyday) and how do I stop making up stories? 

Any help is much appreciated. Thanks for your time and advise. 

Best,",2.1792316358720143,3.992306940063092,3.9382908968003636,86.99169952681389,77.39116719242902,6.7998648039657485,22.993352861649388,7.7094869923839395,1.0000879675529517,1208,37,255,18,28,406,158,317,0.079,0.802,0.11900000000000001,0.9425,1,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,2,4,24,12,0,0,11,1,22,2,0,14,2,61,46,30,1,0,9,4,4,0,2,0,2,1,0,1,13,18,0,7,5,2,2,2,5,3,0,0,8,8,41,9,44,38,6,53,0,2,3,0,19,18,0,4,33,175,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11619522569156615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19362986382217895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574834843162454,0.0,0.07396289749003357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606914430407345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058937591020144314,0.0,0.08227085401887699,0.0,0.2029275176108785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12470619804226238,0.0,0.08327367733248188,0.09813209496075627,0.10034259478282656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745609753385036,0.08146033215124007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19554508295414744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14939543943673142,0.0,0.05051333267136922,0.0,0.054947672572053866,0.16218768949634227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957322339555016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961032286570007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19042827699113188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859370678419614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829067811733246,0.0,0.0,0.08537363035908548,0.0855621843085318,0.0,0.0,0.10554186747346488,0.08219717057690475,0.0,0.0914846174608164,0.4517606475354648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743460274646076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214754110509276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014534597484633,0.10296516832301184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20108526975354585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283519898820416,0.0,0.2200948263938522,0.0,0.0,0.0954636596294072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704452832821544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15995579614217692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053000268183714,0.0,0.0,0.3233281850354245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269423933231739,0.0,0.0,0.08901351950440473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0563771433089299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128400526455822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977432000319916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18678373110294505
mentalhealth,JJMendoza27,2020/03/04,"I’m Slipping I have anxiety and depression. I’ve had a long history of abuse and neglect in my family. I’m really sensitive and can hold up a facade pretty well until recently. In December, I was stressed due to complications with school and my foster family at the time. I was also taking pills and drinking. I let it get the best of me and decided to attempt an overdose. I failed to do so but as a result of the attempt and other things occurring at the moment my foster family left me. On Sunday, I tried to gang myself but the noose broke. Yesterday, I was down in the dumps. Today, it’s gotten worse. I keep thinking about my past and my failures. I want to run away from it all. I have enough money to do so but I don’t want to feel guilty fore leaving what I have left behind (family and friends). I want to kill off the part of me that hurts. I am heartbroken and distraught. I’ve been holding it together for the past 2 months trying to act like it’s alright. People ask me how I am and I say I’m okay. It’s a big lie. I want to kill myself. I want to get rid of the pain I feel permanently.",0.579785018474972,2.8187731877729303,3.2004585152838416,87.80436261336918,85.68122270742359,6.667181726570374,20.598085320792748,7.882392219407189,1.077515149479341,856,27,180,18,26,298,126,229,0.252,0.6629999999999999,0.085,-0.9943,1,0,1,0,1,1,26.0,0,0,0,4,6,17,3,2,14,2,15,3,0,2,1,31,32,20,2,5,3,0,2,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,10,12,1,4,4,1,1,2,1,11,1,0,6,3,30,6,33,25,4,27,0,5,0,0,3,13,0,0,13,125,40,2,0.0,0.14428855519568498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738686099352556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931608300094628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384720507805572,0.0,0.11441565964747365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779986056479692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10488833133233537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929735064324196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258305689840405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45921073809224205,0.0,0.1231505447358412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408638391586634,0.0,0.1272493143969375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036725771780633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824303590615056,0.2694615013188532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894669354338542,0.2646271282309593,0.1245275834915081,0.0,0.059495213925356324,0.0,0.0,0.10777084698013008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972030742011826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12958175965730048,0.0,0.0,0.13187511294339188,0.23250424002017625,0.08442643211952472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389332699807028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801493694081356,0.0,0.12024236568091193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096843786011169,0.0,0.12324715154406145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949777495483864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915628768331822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090475470229798,0.07803125723079983,0.0,0.0,0.07101048826447155,0.0,0.11543253567552893,0.0,0.0,0.16536029972407418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3591429271695503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949421443563233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410350904346995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FarmersonlyDOTcom69,2020/03/04,"Can I get some advice? I don't know if I'm here to vent or to seek advice, I just don't know what to do. Bassicly from 8th-10th grade I went to a small character school (my class was about 50 males and 1 female). For 11th grade I so badly wanted to go to my local public school and ""branch out"" if you will. I'll admit it wasn't as good as I was originally hoping, I definitely struggled socially to say the least. After some time I started to settle in, I got to know some people, some of the best people I've meant even. In particular I became great friends with this girl who was also new. For the first time in a long time, I felt I was enjoying life. Around this time I was looking for a part time job to get some extra cash, much to my surprise I got a part time job as a kitchen member. However, I quickly found myself working from 10 hour weeks to 40 on top of school. Very quickly I started to lose my mind. On a week day I'd get two half meals a day (I was just too busy to even have time to eat). I'd wake up go to school, get home, change and leave for work, then get home around 12-12:30. After doing this for about three weeks I quickly realised it wasn't healthy, my patients grew thin, I'd even occasionally just flat out forget my school id number or what block schedule the day was. Anyways, one day this girl that sat behind me in one of my classes was annoying me, I snapped and yelled her, (I threatened to kill her) it wasn't like I went into detail or anything I just lost my temper and snapped, I know it was my fault and I'm not making excuses. She ended up reporting me to the school admin where I was interrogated for 7 hours over the course of about two days. They ended up searching everything on me under ""probable cause"" I quickly realised they were using loop holes to get around my 5th amendment, they would seach me, then rely that information over to the police so the cops didn't need a warrant. Next thing I knew I was being interrogated by the police, turns out they found ""suspicious text messages"" I sent over 6 years ago. They said I showed ""sociopathic traits"" and that they were concerned for public safety. They also brought all of my friends into questioning then the school contacted my friend's parents explaining the situation. I don't know exactly what the school said to them but now non of them are allowed to hang out with me. After all of this happened I told the police I was getting a lawyer. The school freaked out and we ended up making a deal where I'd pass all of my semester classes if I didn't show up to school again. After the semester ended I switched to online school, and it is literal hell, I hate online school. I've been doing online for about 9 weeks now, and I haven't gone outside much since everything happened. I feel like I lost all of my friends and everything I enjoyed in about 3 days over some stupid mistake I made. I really haven't been doing well since. I've attempted to reconnect with my old friends from my old school but it has been difficult since it's been so long since I spoke to them. Does anyone have any suggestions for getting to know new people? Most people at my work are in their mid 40's so there is just too much of an age difference.",4.054940468227425,5.100067326153846,4.752561872909698,86.1569163879599,71.12307692307692,7.74448160535117,26.28428093645485,8.04050195162591,1.4148394648829423,2542,79,529,34,46,817,283,650,0.107,0.8370000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.9801,6,0,0,0,0,0,69.0,1,1,11,10,37,30,6,1,26,0,43,5,1,7,5,82,97,31,1,8,14,1,3,2,5,2,1,5,3,3,20,25,3,1,16,2,1,10,11,15,1,7,43,9,82,15,96,51,19,99,1,3,1,0,44,37,1,15,54,345,102,25,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094823468369575,0.04300873870129342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760048251187836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032994255960361374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03392527584539405,0.0,0.03992660620721882,0.12957530243110832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04051093584812709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091719120836196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04984188295057596,0.051326158639516964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877425813514806,0.05002046154044264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050691524592238704,0.0,0.0,0.04245888199731858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04964655649928869,0.0,0.0,0.1718920232924126,0.0,0.0,0.0961380705026888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081594625861914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024532420481591644,0.0346616389005914,0.04658538592834169,0.0,0.0,0.04126982656191958,0.0,0.10639610121603928,0.18742643297011216,0.0,0.20279138470567484,0.0,0.055148383693740116,0.040695030890601114,0.07760938207231978,0.05349183729851944,0.0,0.0,0.08580953033369307,0.0,0.0,0.04790199163185505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733605887528399,0.048189835843519935,0.09556193369130922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09629428502228826,0.0,0.05367855146832464,0.0,0.1599870514986745,0.0,0.0,0.051374104962389415,0.0,0.0,0.03427006407397667,0.04740739418700447,0.0,0.0,0.08587472315108187,0.04074333535661324,0.054279811002635285,0.10592738747119876,0.0,0.0,0.0459093947899999,0.06477297493576614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048989872030255316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070000798628776,0.035975866266011736,0.0,0.09371897390136083,0.05159999424458634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182404573967818,0.0,0.06575480683116007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387407237702816,0.1050816536369933,0.0,0.13454652511424556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05231116847319486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0543518440612668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031082204970870636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923044423523337,0.0385838728452467,0.0,0.6383432954713715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16054007761873654,0.05453684699471962,0.0,0.049458518944231686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868331342252933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050722089435610525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032233547412627205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19804076584650307,0.0,0.0,0.04636152309343109,0.0,0.0,0.05277421506003181,0.09479108399407453,0.0,0.0,0.041904421502692975,0.0,0.04003285855897345,0.028617478944041864,0.0,0.15567451395250012,0.0,0.043623974454978204,0.08995430440674296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596617670804738,0.0,0.0,0.03446616307014471,0.0,0.0,0.031244334802066894
mentalhealth,KalyugaPython,2020/03/04,"Friend lost her battle to cancer this morning; feeling depressed I'm sorry if this brings your day down too :(

But I haven't felt this low ever in my life and almost everyone in my social circle is going through something similar - anxious, foggy and unable to put mind to work. 

I woke up this morning to the worst news that my friend, who lives across the street, had passed away in her fight to blood cancer - a battle she had been fighting since last 6 months. She was just 19, taking her medical degree and wanted to devote her life helping the poor and needy across India. She would have made an excellent doctor.

We grew up together in the neighbourhood and I'm still unable to believe this has happened. Initially I didn't felt anything when I heard this news but I'm feeling more and more depressed as time is passing. Unable to focus on work at all, tried multiple things to distract myself but I can't get over this it seems.

I have a deadline to work with and that's making me even more tensed.",4.961769059955588,6.394942264248705,4.949122871946706,84.13369170984456,69.36269430051814,7.1723168023686155,26.73908216136196,7.447530270364453,1.4384170244263514,799,25,146,8,14,248,122,193,0.191,0.746,0.063,-0.9693,0,0,1,0,3,0,18.0,1,1,0,5,6,14,4,1,7,0,13,7,1,2,2,29,32,13,0,3,5,0,4,0,2,1,6,1,0,0,12,9,0,0,5,0,1,6,3,10,0,0,11,5,20,4,26,20,5,28,0,4,0,0,17,15,0,3,7,100,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531475714578367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277895346217448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585679707209071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14369240241531206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17231129239764525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863381091592192,0.0,0.2634544320404013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654082983660886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101559485891233,0.13834321506096858,0.0,0.14614096609263116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546623747690652,0.0,0.2936932547123562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23632252055523106,0.0,0.07990496994788351,0.0,0.08691947043249988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524456085759687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251262791248454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466671906387485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216052447704719,0.0,0.0,0.13504904561664371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669523530268018,0.0,0.0,0.14471576556744353,0.1020888066460857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407121502046153,0.0,0.0,0.15442605741894389,0.0,0.1220754510104349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374719689942498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392310625262127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651375793083244,0.0,0.0,0.15590332796993106,0.0,0.1177408789379436,0.0,0.1712040921123988,0.0,0.0,0.12213828380784213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499203679596826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160670843321402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918069158404349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038363926960628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020812391321928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3340269776307394,0.0,0.0,0.10864436783982168,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ElFantasmaSD,2020/03/04,"Self Worth I often lie awake at night feeling guilty over every mistake in my life even when most is out of my control. The only way for me to seek refuge is to make jokes for my small friend group. If I can get the to be happy, then I can bare me never being a happy a day in my life for about 3 straight years. Pressure, Anxiety, Insomnia, and Depression have really sucked even though nothing is wrong with my surroundings for the most part but the guilt won’t go.",6.359042553191488,5.581844053191492,6.3037021276595775,83.35300000000002,65.91489361702128,9.647659574468086,29.43829787234043,8.841846274778883,1.9987855319148944,367,10,77,5,5,116,70,94,0.13699999999999998,0.721,0.142,-0.1203,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,6,10,1,2,6,0,9,3,0,2,1,13,14,6,0,2,2,0,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,1,1,1,1,2,6,0,0,0,1,10,4,15,11,3,16,0,1,0,0,3,8,1,4,6,53,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16045850858830651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23525294818476405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527167829164455,0.0,0.1806577422312913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27707636809941194,0.0,0.1767237878675232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605612218216297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205266569730292,0.0,0.10958594510666733,0.0,0.11920600585582003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.446566476494625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29630587045803125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14001004403630907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617724661010374,0.0,0.0,0.19683657427196055,0.0,0.20126119928956246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952465746001845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271392809688553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343714995654525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21881544847350076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20607873733068394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16649013214657596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293291733910967,0.0,0.13507240313913882
mentalhealth,Aspiritinabody,2020/03/04,"Obsessive love disorder I’ve been attracted to this girl since Junior year of high school. I’m a sophomore in college now, I thought my “crush” for her would go away after I graduated, it didn’t. I spent my entire freshman year master bating to photos she would post, I’m not exaggerating when I say I check her Twitter/Facebook at least 5 times a day to see if she’s posted any new photos, my obsession with her is so bad that even when she post a photo that’s not even revealing I completely lose control. It’s a cycle I jerk off to her photos then the moment after I lose absolute interest in her actually it’s more than that i start to hate her a little bit, but the interest comes back. I thought her rejecting my friend request would kill my drive to pursue her but it only made it stronger, I’ve spent countless hours trying to figure out how to get a peak at her private Instagram account. She’s literally ruining my life I need help/advice before I end up doing something drastic that I will regret. I’ve had very malicious thoughts relative to her.",5.673820390136179,6.159575454545454,6.71444976076555,75.55807140228195,67.18181818181819,9.875745307324255,32.344865660655124,9.851270322608157,3.1331093853514904,846,34,157,18,13,284,130,209,0.162,0.745,0.09300000000000001,-0.9077,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,8,16,3,2,8,0,9,2,0,3,0,21,25,8,1,6,5,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,0,1,10,3,0,1,5,0,4,3,3,11,0,0,9,2,33,5,23,12,3,32,0,5,1,1,19,10,0,1,16,99,43,4,0.0,0.0,0.13075267054016385,0.0,0.0,0.13093123302739254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111623293242914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588585793085932,0.1030282733317626,0.11187413565207163,0.0,0.0,0.1140136669155972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14627986957987746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154185423796898,0.1404835577710455,0.0,0.15027860254617992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641098415386965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535615162235493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867333553720832,0.0,0.0,0.1769952288285383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351856726040874,0.0,0.07000304487745804,0.0,0.07614829957860891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228511752769867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980913323594703,0.14156536505620507,0.0,0.0,0.13195089806164115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482375418599888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463947738433952,0.0,0.1342908786192886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29979593470973226,0.0,0.0,0.12092913352952515,0.12678240462515536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993501843041392,0.0,0.1294061588544928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019036861375334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849695466473221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10655239960029153,0.0,0.13560270908250094,0.10677085214731012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108360128265402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315028010873477,0.0,0.0,0.09483718608318747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191138097357137,0.0781293073413627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096885541108164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055388761585104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855430605581078,0.0,0.0,0.17256737603442832
mentalhealth,Fucking_Shoot_Me,2020/03/04,"Any advice for telling my family about my mental health problems? How should I bring it up? My issue in particular is really stigmatized. And I just don’t want them to hate me for it. But I’m a bad lier, and I think they know somethings up, but I don’t think they know what. 

I just really don’t want to fuck up my relationships with them.",2.23404761904762,3.9225793571428578,4.131428571428572,86.22190476190477,76.85714285714286,8.095238095238095,20.238095238095237,8.841846274778883,1.1365238095238095,265,6,58,6,6,90,44,70,0.17,0.792,0.038,-0.8738,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,4,0,4,4,2,0,1,0,5,2,0,1,0,16,15,5,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,14,0,10,14,0,5,0,0,0,1,6,4,1,0,0,40,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23442500937712746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16313849083758686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003043482666055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261539633205229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217813246986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368490634346753,0.0,0.2549997687440212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503906080354032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26368272673891185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417602027516762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295494585452804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30736889578260024,0.0,0.0,0.25756007966507405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468477553162949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096809431561545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074331956424557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829954603077689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,athena_modern,2020/03/04,"I [18F] have felt dissociated from my life for as long as I can remember? I’m honestly not sure where to begin. I lived a very ordinary childhood up until I was 5, when my mom was diagnosed with cancer and she began to get very sick, very fast. She passed when I was 8, and while I understood what happened, I think I internally processed most of that grief when I was a bit older, like the start of middle school (~11?). It was then when I was diagnosed with anxiety and depression, which I received therapy and medication for. It was also then when I started having these weird thoughts. It was almost like my life wasn’t my own anymore; I was an actress starring in someone else’s movie and I was trapped inside it. Everything I do, everything I work for just seems like it’s outside of me. It’s like a constant, internal monologue within myself but I feel like I’m entirely separated from it. I have a lot of friends, and a very supportive family, but I truly feel like I lack a true connection with anyone, albeit a few people. Basically, I just feel so separate from myself and other people, and I’m not sure what’s “wrong with me” or if this is something I should even be concerned about.",5.318168812589413,5.990487369098716,6.47143347639485,76.33218597997141,68.01287553648068,9.990157367668099,31.84234620886981,10.047579312681364,3.1663793419170245,939,38,178,22,15,316,132,233,0.09300000000000001,0.758,0.149,0.9411,0,1,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,1,12,16,0,0,9,0,19,7,0,0,3,37,37,25,1,3,8,1,4,6,1,1,7,0,0,0,14,12,0,0,9,1,0,2,3,4,0,0,15,4,32,12,23,20,6,25,0,2,0,0,5,5,0,6,24,130,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276335497104347,0.0,0.0,0.09804091123060472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937864982190402,0.0,0.12158344815422052,0.08572279063143541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13384435544212708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324839855366033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559276145026797,0.2488670904356555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024142028253706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097427344899108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22036485959092944,0.0,0.11557369944502853,0.0,0.1859664358406096,0.17516688312034573,0.11771250741243508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471826814622658,0.0,0.064051960447595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841227108217694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731880112590581,0.35936870298075324,0.0,0.10825554573094284,0.10849463607548107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422772840882548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350374922911665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435843218488182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16998688021163932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388786928427294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407487951336202,0.0,0.11160785763166184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387618289401067,0.09438128974602024,0.0,0.0,0.17354981351440069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391218137932415,0.23109276057040656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020054644916402,0.0,0.0,0.07855531521737752,0.0,0.09732845742759594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40462201318780616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925219867879038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13404075795694798,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gambler_no_1,2020/03/04,"Constant anxiety that things will go wrong. Hello guys, I am 24 year old Male. My problem is I feel like in my life something will always go wrong when everything seems to be going good. This feeling started 15 years back when I unexpectedly lost my father to heart attack. Everything was going so perfect in my family, but this sudden event changed a lot of things including a constant fear of anxiety that something bad will happen when everything seems to going perfect. This is just one case.

Last year I was laid off from my first ever full time job. This left me with shock and so many unans questions, like why a few of us were only laid off, what could I have had done to save my job etc. 

This year I bought my first vehicle and it feels like I am gonna crash it. I been very excited driving and having fear as well.

These are just few of the cases in which I feel this way. I believe this has something to do with hereditary. My father and grandmother also used to get scared with small issues.

This feeling of constant fear needs to go before it gets me. Thoughts?",4.728285256410256,6.065466668269233,4.908384615384616,84.56994871794873,69.81730769230771,7.854358974358973,27.328205128205127,8.238735603445708,1.7275451282051288,849,28,164,12,15,266,124,208,0.17,0.6940000000000001,0.136,-0.8089,2,0,3,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,5,11,20,1,4,4,0,20,2,1,1,3,28,43,12,0,3,3,2,5,3,0,4,1,0,0,2,18,7,0,0,9,0,1,7,0,11,1,3,9,5,21,9,22,28,5,36,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,4,23,109,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366550482822212,0.07664827926709349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14093768918826755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479577879372676,0.0,0.07083187658310604,0.07691340166239817,0.0,0.0,0.07838432813241424,0.10378371307545699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974470071495928,0.0,0.0,0.29863552532431603,0.0,0.07354750276432813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942671271902447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273420982505543,0.0,0.08332461754561139,0.0,0.0,0.24836502064913496,0.0,0.08683920628254574,0.31096990350615217,0.23288426578507884,0.13161604387677678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15670843837300194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962541033612198,0.0,0.3141114637763757,0.0772629215056065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120978417818927,0.08145828693960183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915845610214348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961456582194916,0.1828227580196748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750872146645254,0.0,0.0,0.10008481017615033,0.0,0.06506458436308253,0.13501035737148825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055600455842664,0.07831412554168687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093391638588358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830319256617241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666073573598208,0.0,0.06242050156528577,0.07005872355653749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814301765920604,0.0,0.0,0.10319152411211237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222465262488523,0.0,0.0,0.16771874255420466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21274726850893225,0.0,0.0,0.06520050897584499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12239617413163115,0.0,0.0,0.07313018474187591,0.053713852287000055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108047669709051,0.07955905078445791,0.0,0.07600573192343693,0.0,0.07311776328917506,0.0,0.0,0.08282376595654621,0.0,0.08312078304598175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014297904520853,0.0,0.2372799365894597
mentalhealth,ThisMechanic9,2020/03/04,"Vent/Xpost - losing hope Hitting the lowest low ever

I’ve worked really hard to manage my depression. I work out regularly, own a dog, go to therapy, take my meds, check in with my psychiatrist, change my sleep habits, no alcohol, no pot, and the list goes on. 

I’ve been unemployed for months now. I’m behind on my rent. My electric gets shut off this week. I haven’t had oil all winter for gear hence the electric. I make just too much for food stamps and food pantry food has been getting me by but it’s all boxed and canned so hasn’t been sitting well. 

Last night, I got a flat cause I hit a pothole and come to find out my lock key for my locking lug nut was stripped so I had to call a tow cause neither me or the tow truck guy could get that last nut off. I spent my last $20 on the tow cause it was just outside of my tow coverage for roadside assistance. 

Every day, I make it a point to apply to at least 5+ jobs. Try to leave the house at least for the dog. 

I just have no more hope and feel dead inside in a new way. I actually had to call the suicide hotline last week. 

Sigh.",1.2992368475774612,3.0539643842794746,2.7301060511540847,94.91164483260557,79.82969432314411,6.108629652734457,20.51174880432523,7.07126945348624,0.2119443127469327,840,22,198,10,21,273,138,229,0.125,0.833,0.042,-0.9497,5,0,1,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,0,3,9,7,0,0,14,0,14,5,1,5,3,27,30,9,2,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,5,9,4,0,2,0,3,2,6,3,2,0,10,3,22,3,29,17,8,31,0,3,0,0,3,14,0,3,13,111,27,5,0.0,0.0,0.1107489289750872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212852661724784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23176999091742576,0.0,0.0,0.3497535085163555,0.12005635287788732,0.0977607562400793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061176123764073,0.0,0.0,0.07319104005439538,0.0,0.0977479411416736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265733120068143,0.09561940828803413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738346699530825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372692365351932,0.0,0.4116941815229286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17788001300039205,0.0,0.06449843499765855,0.0,0.090767550189656,0.0,0.0,0.11237198920232197,0.0,0.0,0.10166388549887748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225440441697218,0.0,0.13095111119498312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262035742782893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3700348488504444,0.0,0.12016850350069935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696520286363555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515096267081965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260607356682395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905858664649935,0.0,0.08342750030059301,0.0,0.0,0.10960841898454976,0.0,0.1065017731254016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728382272162394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270398305889637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357099727501427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12413858629770558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532963182619567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978460430545527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705160640502688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008231497157597,0.18206811961557348,0.0,0.10204027361343353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16524274094921346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fardednshided,2020/03/04,"self harm i’ve been struggling with the urge to cut, it’s not like i do it everyday but i do it sometimes.
it usually happens when i get nervous panic attacks, then i get these cravings where i feel the urge to cut myself? i just did it for the first time in 2 months or so & i feel really guilty & bad, i don’t know how to stop. i just feel good doing it in the moment & bad later. anyone got advice??",2.762992424242423,3.2290753750000007,4.477727272727275,89.08242424242425,73.6590909090909,7.2303030303030305,23.75757575757576,7.1686216300943375,0.7405621212121214,315,8,72,3,6,107,57,88,0.37,0.593,0.037000000000000005,-0.987,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,1,6,11,3,3,4,0,6,0,0,1,0,12,14,6,0,0,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,9,0,1,3,3,10,2,7,11,0,13,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,11,45,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763347929459559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5865562955409223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261756523926401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20528925442264773,0.0,0.0,0.30133837572718225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737245975368226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15349167135182734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885565749078449,0.0,0.0,0.15135387830479094,0.14432328361000052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15957237194918386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917124274938324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08815932576407418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14403440072545645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21172056531951172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560163896305707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18824992320377895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17847081931658995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086525655038766,0.0,0.18864674098515527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522252723433703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987414676477464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,h_diabetes,2020/03/04,"Do you guys think this is social anxiety? What should I do to seek help? For a long time I haven’t been able to grasp how to act around others. Being around my friends and my friends alone is completely fine, but whenever someone like a friend of my friends I don’t know real well is there I am extremely uncomfortable (note that this is the case even when my friends are still there). I quite literally can’t act like myself. I am uncomfortable, awkward, and really just annoying. Do you guys think this is social anxiety? What do you think I could do to fix this?",2.6669090909090905,5.080591145454548,3.4354545454545486,88.24318181818184,78.45454545454545,7.636363636363638,23.63636363636364,8.575989854853784,1.5898181818181818,446,15,92,10,11,141,65,110,0.142,0.625,0.233,0.9146,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,1,10,11,1,1,3,0,20,0,0,1,0,15,24,5,0,2,2,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,0,2,8,4,0,0,5,0,0,2,3,2,1,0,1,0,15,9,8,20,0,8,0,0,0,0,13,2,0,0,6,65,23,0,0.15027316951428488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15563768360010702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22991712672535075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675499612595447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15755855916903366,0.0,0.0,0.11998089801806387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925401120416953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5805033899901109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975881274663946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072493790296094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258620398215387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468317600673863,0.0,0.0,0.1329870261992733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983401326850089,0.0,0.17104376589089199,0.09626884035527236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063691439466809,0.12732596887458658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200083472898744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28886693778034045,0.0,0.0,0.08762549360859694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511362647548816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Erg_22,2020/03/04,"Videogames as a Bad Coping Mechanism Hello everyone. Fellow severe OCD and mild depression sufferer. As the title suggests, the only real attempt at escaping and coping are through videogames. The catch is however, is that through a mix of OCD perfectionism and immense self hatred, I also give myself nonstop shit when I do badly. It includes me telling myself I'm good for nothing and I should kill myself. I expect myself to be virtually perfect, which I'm not, and when I fail, It's nonstop self hatred. 

I should also mention I' m on 80mg of Prozac and take ERP for the OCD. So far I've improved in the contamination OCD aspect. Not really anything else. Part of me wants to drop videogames for a bit, but I don't have really anything else to distract myself.

Any suggestions?",3.985330049261087,6.605577055172418,5.213423645320199,76.13215517241382,75.0,7.453201970443351,30.357142857142854,8.418075326091056,2.7969211822660105,623,29,100,12,14,206,91,145,0.152,0.7559999999999999,0.092,-0.8305,1,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,3,5,10,2,1,8,0,9,2,1,0,1,15,14,14,1,4,3,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,0,0,15,2,16,11,2,8,0,3,0,0,9,4,1,0,2,67,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873853275879458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219080024711908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957280788191004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000560870952361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961676174350256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15476095621410466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002046682267043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716950857830343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17236858672455938,0.0,0.15070982041776335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19879294044092516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17241096487839974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366572404997308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19457949536156435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20451892411627412,0.23021943597688385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3748977223109744,0.20299097528469634,0.1844423172472467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509947381581686,0.0,0.15705111717827752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059818611284501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EpicNate1,2020/03/04,"How to cope with DID? Does anyone know how to cope with multiple personalities? I know I have 3 (including myself) but I could have more. One is super angry all the time and always complains to me about what’s going on and threatening to take over but never does. The other is a girl (I’m a boy) who plays music in my head and calms me down by giving me advice. I’m kind of worried though. I’ve never had an outburst, and I don’t plan on having one. I’ve tried preventing one for as long as I could,  it it’s getting harder with my toxic life full of toxic people. I’m worried my angry personality is going to take over unexpectedly and I’m going to do something I’m going to regret. If anyone knows how to cope with this, without seeing a therapist, then I would love to hear your method of preventing an outburst.",2.685981067125645,4.408609078313255,4.815008605851983,81.66024096385546,75.68674698795179,6.911531841652324,22.098106712564544,7.7094869923839395,1.0225142857142862,641,17,125,9,14,222,94,166,0.16399999999999998,0.726,0.111,-0.8245,0,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,2,5,7,0,0,7,0,13,3,1,3,3,28,32,15,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,4,6,9,0,2,3,1,0,4,4,2,0,3,2,2,14,5,28,27,3,16,0,1,1,1,10,7,0,1,5,89,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407113676963804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267718676102846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061790457703913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23542865720405826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580415798114526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702836076340443,0.14143245924215564,0.3351613462945057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15131017401530691,0.0,0.16616922337391046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15353018376310634,0.24307818279754376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413723887556806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304747569023115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306525367038316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22742091366346534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29971598585628656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221241194249353,0.2574679685951544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748608553550913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350216269836005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22170455982940104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17118263944419046,0.0,0.0,0.144853496580457,0.0,0.08597015290721051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10009824322791967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421214485338302,0.0,0.0,0.29945347040745257,0.0,0.10473312944534137,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ldhsuued,2020/03/04,"Is there something wrong with me? Sometimes, for no reason I get super angry over small things like in fighting games, if my oppenent gets a good combo, I get really angry and I start throwing things. Over the smallest shit, and it's affecting my relationship with family members.",6.0150000000000015,8.291543100000002,6.277000000000001,72.32350000000002,68.0,9.0,30.5,9.516144504307137,3.261000000000001,225,9,34,5,4,72,41,50,0.284,0.569,0.147,-0.8271,0,0,1,0,2,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,1,6,2,0,2,0,1,1,1,2,0,7,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,6,3,6,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,1,2,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615200347522316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43481010825056254,0.0,0.0,0.23268063795357866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355298482608676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17771769976212068,0.2852264916559897,0.0,0.2978374554919208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847601830044209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135658743543092,0.2743682855027807,0.0,0.19635415963783848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36860138505063744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033072736050104,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymous49901,2020/03/04,"I don't know what my thoughts or emotions are? I knew I had an issue with not feeling emotions but I don't even really have thoughts? My doctor asked me why I'm anxious in certain situations and what my anxious thoughts are. I don't have anxious thoughts. I don't know why I'm anxious. I don't really have many thoughts at all? I'm worried because she got a bit frusterated and said that if I don't reflect on this and tell her what I'm anxious about she can't help me. I feel like she doesn't believe me because it sounds like I'm lying or avoiding talking about it but I really don't know how I feel or what I'm thinking about. 

The same goes for other symptoms and timelines. I don't know when this started. I don't know what other symptoms I have. I don't know if this is impacting my life. Most of the time I don't know the day's date or what my schedule is. My memory is horrible, I don't remember not being mentally ill so I have no baseline, and I don't know how to recognize my own thoughts apparently. How the hell am I supposed to get diagnosed or treated?",2.479016715830877,3.853102663716818,4.187197640117994,87.40527040314653,75.46017699115046,7.3231071779744354,30.254670599803337,7.984000788550335,1.999554375614552,846,40,182,13,18,285,101,226,0.192,0.753,0.055,-0.9838,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,9,6,1,1,6,0,28,6,0,3,2,46,58,19,0,2,11,0,3,2,0,0,6,2,0,0,14,6,0,1,21,0,0,0,18,2,0,0,10,5,34,4,11,47,5,9,1,0,0,0,9,3,1,8,8,120,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5292359676230332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759094636843384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11422959967415515,0.0,0.0,0.10556069675975624,0.0,0.0,0.10228923594649852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06042467478177335,0.0,0.0,0.09509711653061992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589945521834348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107855662574373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061883794315118014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212302469531166,0.06693478622360431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04895108257212071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074935397787381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280090108164835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779186320589472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4119327852642629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617861951766257,0.0915480022288024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949906892785258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442119599301617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006771846970976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613667892983117,0.0,0.08912414865987553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531562588169167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663168714302683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19476722368439534,0.0,0.0753074337552595,0.0818924091078943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06003512921093116,0.0,0.44629391414678615,0.054633540321918035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690879525031241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951504836085483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ranachu,2020/03/04,Constant panic attack I have been having panic attacks 1-2 times a day for about the past year and a half and it is really getting in the way of my daily life and I don't know what to do. I have tried to pinpoint a cause but they happen so randomly from when I'm drying my hair to when I'm in class and I just don't know what to do so I'm venting here,2.6607407407407417,2.33527779012346,4.858864197530868,89.08088888888891,73.56790123456791,7.467654320987655,23.60740740740741,6.742157984588678,0.567343703703703,275,6,67,2,5,97,52,81,0.115,0.885,0.0,-0.743,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,7,4,2,2,5,0,9,2,1,1,0,10,16,9,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,1,7,0,10,15,0,10,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,7,46,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5185636012497185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341275006218748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462909531532725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698381739078206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907415319729625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20154105018952087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505079816533093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609803637584872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5348091848230709,0.0,0.0,0.21756695213950566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600569907968658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328968065296231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15473668958776818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809052381832616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676728852830082
mentalhealth,adieucaribou,2020/03/04,"not much of a sharer, so I’m starting small (tw: suicide attempt/ideation) One thing I’m always confronted about, whether that be in therapy or friendships, is that I don’t actually share much about myself or my past. I’ve heard multiple times from people that while I know a lot about them, they know nothing about me. So anyway, I’m starting small by sharing on an anonymous platform like reddit.

June 2018, I tried to take my life. At that point of my life, I honestly felt I was already dead. I was so lifeless and hopeless I can only describe myself as a premature ghost, haunting my college campus and avoiding any type of intimacy and love that I had access to. Since then, I lost nearly all of my friends (my fault, my depression & planning for my own death lead to me isolating myself from anyone who cared about me. I hurt a lot of people this way and it’s my biggest regret. This is the part of my past I have the most trouble talking about) but was given the chance to start over. 3 colleges, 2 therapists, 2 psychiatrist, 3 antidepressants, 1 phone/social media phobia, and almost 2 years later im still alive and finally happy about it. I’m finally looking forward to the future even though I’m still healing and probably will be for many many years. 

I know my experiences seem small and insignificant compared to others, but the affect they had on my well-being was profound. This is the most I’ve shared about this stuff since my last therapist, I hope I can share more in the future <3",6.057085736255286,6.648922830449831,6.350559400230683,78.12892252979627,66.37024221453287,8.913571703191083,32.318531334102275,8.841846274778883,2.657343560169166,1194,47,218,18,18,384,168,289,0.11800000000000001,0.757,0.125,0.7175,0,1,0,0,0,2,41.0,0,0,3,3,16,20,1,1,12,0,16,4,0,2,1,30,37,20,4,2,6,0,1,1,1,1,3,1,0,0,15,8,0,1,5,0,0,2,2,9,0,1,10,3,36,11,33,24,10,35,0,5,1,1,12,14,0,9,21,147,51,5,0.0,0.0,0.11304992272416592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600399729358013,0.0,0.12784000208251173,0.0,0.09639395178453804,0.12552013374677,0.0,0.0787799059810722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100288864500918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811369744402644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977881768046976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651582510303673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133205570599618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123124970406292,0.2538093662466757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950307462906308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233212440552941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506217147483826,0.0,0.0,0.12401656765911087,0.0,0.1251345972222312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909993801708461,0.0944307350304067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365226898625493,0.05659697344511563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972822703626177,0.0,0.12646064266196966,0.19697788688009207,0.1045564051895504,0.0,0.0,0.23490127092859805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032169158356314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115828340396282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850089885623865,0.0881068340368398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545096946273518,0.22117806509290389,0.16062739240603474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951282310785122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490261756559347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546272230584942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19165960639015994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24599122558162295,0.0,0.1850310652583636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261705410058253,0.12671777251407745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710249727293452,0.09311339897541272,0.0,0.0,0.13248109596453655,0.2690145010429146,0.07696357322480417,0.0,0.11381905090795595,0.0,0.06755129452381274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865248206436913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195392533901137,0.0,0.0,0.10416033051973199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492032892698098
mentalhealth,-Genocide-,2020/03/04,"I hate myself I just hate every single thing about me, my body and my personality. I see a lot of people with lives worse than mine ( I actually have a good life) and it makes me feel worse because I feel like I am ungrateful for what I have. I feel like I don't deserve anything I have and I'm worthless. I think no one actually likes me, and they all despise every second they spend with me, even when my friends invite me to do stuff I think they don't actually want to see me. I give up too easily because of that, I don't think what I'm doing js worth it or I think I suck at everything so I don't even want to try anymore. I don't think I deserve to live and I want to die. I feel like the world would be the same without me, or maybe it'd be better, so why should I even live?",1.3411779448621566,2.579827198830412,3.5267878028404347,91.53223684210528,78.18128654970761,6.523141186299082,21.571010860484535,7.1686216300943375,0.3809712614870517,605,16,146,7,14,208,86,171,0.19699999999999998,0.66,0.14300000000000002,-0.8579,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,3,1,9,12,4,0,4,0,16,2,1,1,1,29,37,10,1,5,4,0,4,4,1,2,1,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,9,0,2,0,7,5,0,2,0,6,37,7,15,32,4,4,0,1,2,0,6,3,1,3,5,101,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.3337281337127683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305244441664924,0.0,0.0,0.09380820169163187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898063186783524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081934570908664,0.0,0.12662278674942834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830884996138445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22587793866461864,0.0,0.19209146893488627,0.0,0.10245138799109424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230557261649249,0.2443142296698364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807228210257706,0.0,0.0,0.10935442595324264,0.0,0.09561362781048192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22509299533800434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051806522076763,0.22276886607833685,0.0,0.3019791160475476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691450317864116,0.0,0.0,0.07609257177288924,0.0,0.1145233357219164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724598666611071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902980470791525,0.0995360685161536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816785695457917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130497043244217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573323665996452,0.3652170810281735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739514667121458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20171167737792856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286278927334652,0.0,0.0,0.10988714686386472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23234136127859,0.0809788029576187,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carrottop092583,2020/03/04,"Supporting my boyfriend who has bipolar I'm a 36 yo F and I've been dating my 35 yo M boyfriend for 5 months and he let me know early on that he has bipolar. He takes his medication and sees a psychiatrist regularly, as well as has access to telehealth support through an app. He's had one other depressive episode that lasted a day, which scared and worried me, prior to tonight. He slept poorly Sunday night, struggled to get through work Monday, and called out today. He came over to my place and I've tried to be supportive, yet not pushy when asking if he wants to talk about things. He mentioned a couple things that have gotten him down, and has made comments like it feels like a struggle just to maintain himself. I don't know his history of suicidal ideation. I've suggested remembering what his therapist has taught him when he gets this way. 

tl;dr: What can I do to help support my boyfriend while not worrying myself to death about whether he'll be ok? I love him very much, so what should I know to better be there for him when he has a depressive episode?",5.348944099378882,6.3992497777777775,5.282708764665287,83.52315217391306,68.1304347826087,8.426363008971705,31.69392684610076,8.634040054169528,2.3830651483781926,852,35,166,13,14,265,129,207,0.105,0.7440000000000001,0.151,0.8131,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,10,15,0,3,7,1,17,5,1,1,0,22,39,16,2,3,5,0,1,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,13,9,0,0,5,0,1,1,3,5,1,1,7,2,19,10,23,26,1,23,0,2,1,1,28,5,0,1,18,101,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163701298952428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009067842056386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710595895911767,0.14236967458523275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773254316629005,0.0,0.08027801439267056,0.0,0.2144254438792866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293981867079708,0.08892711050965685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13006923828564398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343498180359236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20522956588319374,0.10146618663885801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12728719213187534,0.0,0.12162732968090205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123462580253654,0.11778409658096482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539849268778752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935715473430506,0.0,0.09150565513071066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681417383127457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434951662825069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005301977339812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100931232962746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462419677902155,0.0,0.09919285249820432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602628724774047,0.0,0.1361587321356081,0.5650246525649807,0.0,0.0,0.0935919670874146,0.10005070399987316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445285561030016,0.1653953086928071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179905924039919,0.0,0.0,0.08451239336623786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027073892063007,0.07342035152645847,0.0988048451345784,0.0,0.0,0.11192067427492887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09062146901004896,0.25282690954261283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Caver95,2020/03/04,"I’m utterly exhausted I don’t even know where to begin. I’m tired, I sleep like crap, I work my ass off and don’t feel like I’m getting ahead, and I feel like my wife is ungrateful for everything I do and I just want to take a nap, I feel like I’m slipping into a depression just because of hearing symptoms but I also feel like it could stem from a. Car accident I was in because I hurt 80% of the time. I am evicting a tenant and can’t afford the mortgage because they didn’t pay and I’m just sick of carrying The whole burden of finances and being the soul provider with a stay at home wife with 3 kids. I don’t want to hang out with my kids. The wife and I fight about finances because she just wants to spend It all. It all makes me tired and angry and wanting to run away. 

I don’t know why I’m posting this other than I don’t feel I can tell anyone this.",2.170136778115502,3.0757792659574505,3.832249240121581,91.50500000000002,75.48936170212765,6.8607902735562325,25.130699088145896,7.1686216300943375,0.8777039513677813,674,22,157,7,14,226,100,188,0.226,0.706,0.068,-0.9858,3,0,0,0,1,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,8,11,2,0,10,0,14,8,3,1,2,34,36,11,0,5,5,3,5,5,0,0,5,1,2,2,6,14,0,0,7,1,4,3,7,6,0,0,2,6,22,5,23,32,3,15,1,2,0,1,10,7,2,0,8,95,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071526624746514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368971723763478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588908231507126,0.0,0.0,0.3267190096264773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106981018564069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540636847849865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849988115268917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042259259239632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.338749719906424,0.3828931752701203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07000483790422371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101774764091727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344040336563578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434402815890194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14727604755918064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273065027234378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944012325836766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832646902852302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408790207656804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428167221218435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926809384647978,0.10074465832887168,0.0,0.11711415813405472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813130851059027,0.3080061982267727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161257727176611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090615860332204,0.14959631744207172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754714231137776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mudock999065,2020/03/04,"Don't know if I have depression Hi I don't really want to say much information but I'll only say the information that's important, for starters I really think I have depression but I don't know if I have it, if I say anything about it to my family they'll just call me an attention seeker and tell me not to think about it and my family right now are the Iast people I want to talk to, so I need help. from what I gathered I don't really seem to have the emotional aspect of depression I only have the symptoms of it such as low energy and lack of motivation I think I don't feel the emotional aspect because I  also believe I have sociopathy I really don't know if that's how that works. If I only feel the physical symptoms not the mental symptoms of depression. As for the sociopathy I don't really have a lot of empathy for anything or anyone and I rarely feel happy or excited about something but often I do feel emotions like like embarrassment anger regret, 

As I was writing this down I've just remember something that might have kicked started my depression or sociopathy about a year ago I I got assaulted when they punched me  in the head and I blacked out and before then everything was normal. I don't think if this is strong enough evidence to prove sociopathy maybe I fell the wrong side of my head, but just worth mentioning.
I really can't just go see a psychologist or psychiatrist because no one would take me and no one would take me seriously so I just need help here any input would be really appreciated.",5.638096897873822,6.2076033046357635,6.980470547229,73.32634541652145,67.27814569536424,11.52345765074939,31.126524921575466,11.313756151347434,3.7341231788079474,1226,46,233,39,19,419,135,302,0.19399999999999998,0.682,0.124,-0.9777,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,3,18,17,2,1,14,0,28,5,2,2,1,62,50,30,0,16,21,0,4,2,0,5,3,3,0,0,11,8,0,0,18,0,1,2,13,12,0,2,3,9,40,5,27,41,4,15,0,7,2,0,16,6,0,14,9,165,51,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597716576320372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854263692848385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058286063019526775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059930757894799624,0.0,0.14106483797334868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449662162971984,0.0,0.07293330245399851,0.09656635600351827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751997930512442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3691115382096944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892382485587037,0.0,0.08856183386946846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703104945245741,0.0,0.16160041803180294,0.0,0.17335116850998922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048711238878368285,0.0,0.06855049769584523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09124039579814038,0.0,0.0,0.17592735230776016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489985112535166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14131270875092475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374761863079835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286798191219424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861076937115013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637600078835088,0.09092527063701428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300706205220108,0.12710646428166109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397806871397707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615927388701232,0.19556003845788056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059420852309025426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3843582810068982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970932613858664,0.07319627844367485,0.0,0.20448123275432326,0.0,0.0,0.06830015263604887,0.07802759856055784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196822417709386,0.0,0.0,0.060666316272518964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672580084839091,0.12888722275013115,0.06889083419250586,0.0749147341258696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196792494954496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110851920384603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06239824755116671,0.0,0.0,0.18265878962336854,0.09371095077494414,0.0,0.05519473660701149
mentalhealth,o_fly_on,2020/03/04,"Ask me anything Hi. 
Ask me anything about therapy, meds, and what I’ve found helpful, shitty, or neutral about the mental health system. I am American.",3.8288888888888906,6.826619296296298,4.527407407407409,78.63333333333334,78.25925925925927,6.562962962962962,31.222222222222207,7.793537801064563,2.765355555555556,119,6,18,2,3,38,22,27,0.122,0.782,0.095,-0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,10,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4647087767032376,0.0,0.5279282594736355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3095880588090155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001305251698657,0.0,0.0,0.18925683404511534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136331326684563,0.0,0.2845477741976777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3228979412557193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kateawesome,2020/03/04,"My therapist cut my session short. I was diagnosed with CPTSD, OCD and an anxiety disorder three years ago. Starting therapy was a huge step for me. Today was my second session and right before my session started something happened that got me irrationally upset. During the session I couldn't say anything, I felt so many things but I couldn't process my emotions. My therapist kept asking what I wanted to talk about and I kept saying I don't know. I told him I was physically and mentally exhausted. He asked if I was in distress or suicidal and I said no.
He taught me some breathing exercises then ended my session after only 15min. After I hung up (it was a video session) I started freaking out and I burst out crying. I felt abandoned by my therapist. I'm a mess right now and I feel that I'm too much to handle even for my therapist and I'm not worthy. I just feel empty right now and a wave of apathy is taking over me. Is this normal for a therapist to do? Am I overreacting?",2.2248754009375773,4.7734485958549255,4.257498149518874,80.90770293609674,81.1761658031088,7.1995065383666415,26.807056501357017,8.269060116576782,2.2619584998766338,781,34,141,17,21,266,114,193,0.247,0.7440000000000001,0.008,-0.9928,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,1,2,7,0,13,4,1,0,0,30,35,14,1,5,5,0,4,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,6,12,0,3,5,2,0,1,5,7,0,2,14,7,32,0,17,19,2,23,0,1,0,0,10,10,0,3,12,100,38,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001169230786428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864008857915762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294225041570857,0.0,0.21117242864066596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961059518120996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406229482671803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463450212094392,0.0,0.0,0.129442163186442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12704537910159622,0.10003374310347543,0.0,0.0,0.07459761357100958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11421448423990023,0.0,0.2168854814352606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033062546986256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987489062977864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207037535525295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450620974467628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381971596203255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302590813339515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11065990368651124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589804200104482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28935744463387475,0.10743440791170768,0.17963319764164706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694883795706143,0.0,0.0,0.2398243548061625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354102453779968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849188834321073,0.0907790949871807,0.0,0.0,0.12915986449754838,0.655676122121594,0.07503413688262225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705651002165142,0.1079216266626804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661655339497682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273142060145607
mentalhealth,NinjaChkn,2020/03/04,"Medications So in late 2018 I was diagnosed with severe ADHD and Bipolar and have since been on numerous medications to try and find the right mix.

Now what seems to be the problem is that any medication I seem to take for longer than 4-5 days just completely stops working, in saying that I still stuck out the recommended time in which they say the medication will start working properly. I told my psych numerous times about this and his conclusion was that I had some kind of liver condition where the medications are processed by my liver so quickly that they don’t have time to work properly.

Is this actually a thing? And if so what are some things I could try or read up on as having a medication work great the first few days and then nothing afterwards really kills what hope I had of feeling somewhat better.",11.619632034632033,8.283987110389614,10.817402597402602,63.22229437229443,57.766233766233775,14.941991341991345,42.54978354978356,13.023866798666859,5.31984329004329,661,26,120,18,6,214,102,154,0.057999999999999996,0.8390000000000001,0.102,0.7932,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,2,7,9,6,1,0,8,0,16,10,2,0,0,23,24,13,1,4,3,0,1,0,0,1,8,2,0,0,12,8,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,7,3,12,4,19,14,4,23,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,8,14,89,24,6,0.0,0.0,0.10747008039480027,0.0,0.13235373390208435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489154017325846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740020778139294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154682285679525,0.0,0.0,0.08792909651626749,0.0,0.0,0.14204827137595755,0.0,0.0,0.11177868201027756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05568456389050412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065596956388316,0.0936757257875003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141768212007276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938300992007503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218414926089555,0.11468247329436627,0.0,0.0,0.12423038135296953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6656606763710831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056718073405478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537864122764548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015886673401952,0.0,0.07055149857132638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940496191304086,0.0,0.17515810428949827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20051472786086785,0.0,0.12441449560521375,0.0,0.09109989998596983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794991850392857,0.0,0.08794921296572067,0.09207282896204354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280335058123063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463297135040448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19265142898753493,0.0,0.0,0.10523304036364503,0.0,0.14954081112169468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207010816052931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mainerjd,2020/03/04,What’s going on with me? For quite a while it’s been feeling like I’ve been living in a fog. I get really lost in my thoughts and it’s like it distracts me from the “external” world. This fog feels worst in the morning as I feel practically useless. Anytime I’m anywhere socially I often panic and overthink which sorta makes the fog even worse because I’m thinking about it and it feels like I can’t stop thinking about it which puts all my attention and awareness on it. I get a lot of panic because I feel as though it makes me look foolish to other people as I have a hard time concentrating or focusing on anything external. I’ve become aware of my inner voice and it’s almost like I can hear it in my head. I’m aware of how my head feels. Almost like electrical zaps in my head. I have a big problem with talking to myself I find. I’m very aware of my own thinking and mental processes. It really feels like I’m in a “dream” like state. It makes it very hard to be social as Im often on edge and get paranoid. My memory is horrible and I have a hard time remembering what I did earlier in the day. I’m always googling my symptoms trying to find an answer to try and relieve some of the stress but I just don’t know what’s happening.,3.275142330534507,4.41015245525292,4.882928527544543,84.14625639975425,73.08560311284045,7.90079868933033,27.144992832275253,8.371475516178862,1.7874171206225675,979,35,202,16,19,331,124,257,0.11900000000000001,0.812,0.07,-0.8292,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,8,16,0,4,13,0,11,4,3,4,1,45,40,18,0,1,3,0,10,7,0,0,1,2,0,0,20,11,0,1,17,1,0,2,2,8,0,0,5,13,26,8,31,34,5,22,0,2,1,0,4,14,0,8,12,124,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19577752331602047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134102954771691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044506285248068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918260305892656,0.1079640957595412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06304469288191163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456707993968126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3459994741666312,0.2095112496256135,0.0,0.0,0.17869487960443062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532208147487132,0.0,0.05555712861532329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644552739105227,0.0,0.2627111911660963,0.0,0.3009783398299886,0.0,0.11017839636890213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559352305470937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05372427743460857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343113548991629,0.0,0.08632055809091918,0.0,0.0820906279029008,0.0,0.10671249265081513,0.08310886637770598,0.0,0.0,0.19575916418264566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985153056168056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293917888794099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777187380530117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353952720658758,0.0,0.09827202984422416,0.0,0.10397580295831754,0.0,0.0,0.12525031150898547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073877270839136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19930036850164173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172860068557355,0.11197945196802006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160617202319776,0.0,0.07857276931935359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18791476976409247,0.09604501746843193,0.07760754154950375,0.11400490885838648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327401512057385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613182851668882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962196841128863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mosbyes,2020/03/04,"Mental Illness from cannabis? I had multiple bad trips over the course of a few years from smoking marijuana, so bad that I can’t even express the fear and sense of doom that came along with it. 

I haven’t smoked weed in over 6 months but yet I find myself getting into a similar mindset I was during the bad trips. 

Derealization, intrusive thoughts about death/time/the universe, and this very heavy sense of impending doom causing me to feel extremely panicked and uneasy. 

I feel this way about once a week and usually at night time. It’s very unsettling and I don’t know how long these thoughts will last. Does anyone have similar experience to this?",4.9384426229508165,7.076646614754104,4.836852459016395,82.1142950819672,70.55737704918033,8.48655737704918,30.2327868852459,9.120678840339163,2.648446557377049,525,22,97,11,10,162,84,122,0.221,0.779,0.0,-0.9781,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,6,0,7,1,0,2,0,19,14,8,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,6,0,0,3,3,6,0,0,5,2,9,0,16,8,1,18,2,2,0,0,1,5,0,1,9,57,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850791778783785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4603625954764013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21020299711990909,0.0,0.1887995436144185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608329595296633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138936680272888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179778635971284,0.0,0.2068111073246254,0.1858561320917348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797769317070022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602095319947414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10100435122377724,0.14981067140844834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16264542568562254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18521374329415566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14669677212722798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17247134628182187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19572681282072107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29181218468023035,0.2143349786245679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024150594921004,0.3032865123899744,0.0,0.1458813096100952,0.1474225864208086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835259428332165
mentalhealth,HanamichiSakurag1,2020/03/04,"First Therapy Session On Friday. Need some advice Hello,

I'm 26, male, and for the for the first time ever I have set an appointment to talk to a therapist this Friday.

The person who will see me is a psychotherapist. Do you guys have any experiences with talking to a psychotherapist?

I know I have a lot to say, and I tend to forget when I keep talking and talking. I just don't know if the therapist will understand me or just pretend to listen.

Do you guys think I'm doing myself a favor here?",2.672121212121212,4.731885101010104,4.671717171717173,81.16090909090913,76.77777777777777,7.632323232323233,24.131313131313128,8.515128840125781,1.7536949494949492,391,13,75,8,9,134,60,99,0.040999999999999995,0.9279999999999999,0.031,0.1926,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,2,5,1,0,0,10,0,10,0,0,0,1,18,21,6,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,4,2,4,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,11,1,10,19,2,7,0,0,1,0,14,1,0,4,5,57,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714507222021388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631777217540185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472173325952512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16731671071119586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909848483635958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33872668879762363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203436309976268,0.0,0.0,0.1880058297581048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541797609669346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682912508074168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14935157440327093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360233774221143,0.0,0.0,0.13630225104076016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5499241459415585,0.0,0.0,0.19560706180143103,0.3971973189674435,0.0,0.10959996082560264,0.0,0.0,0.09973883554090758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17806587773826885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rabbitdearr,2020/03/04,"I don’t feel like a human being. I think people think I say this as a metaphor, but I really truly do not feel human. I can’t tell you exactly what I do feel like; it’s not like I feel like a specific animal or anything. The closest thing is just... a thing.

Sometimes it gets so bad that I feel like my insides are wrong. Like my organs aren’t the ones I’m supposed to have, aren’t made of blood and tissue, or are in the wrong place. Most days I feel numb, but not in the way that I simply feel nothing; like I feel nothing but it’s wrong. Those are the really bad days. For the last couple of years, though, every day, I have not felt like a human being, and yet desperately longing to be one.

I have a long, extensive history of trauma and abuse so it’s safe to say that if this is an actual mental thing, that’s probably where it comes from. I do dissociate but I’m not aware of dissociation coming out like this. Am I delusional? If I were delusional, would I even be questioning if I were delusional?

I’ve talked to my therapist about this thousands of times but again, I think she just assumes I’m speaking in metaphors. I don’t know how to explain these thoughts and feelings. If I really sit down and say it, I can say that I’m biologically human but it feels like a lie coming out of my mouth. Like logically I know the truth, but my brain tells me it’s a lie. I really just feel wrong all of the time and I don’t know how to make it stop.",2.401212871287129,3.7255899174917495,4.249261551155119,87.08399133663366,75.56765676567656,7.822277227722773,22.85602310231023,8.472884824447931,1.184348844884489,1127,31,252,21,24,383,134,303,0.159,0.7,0.141,-0.8632,2,0,0,0,1,0,37.0,0,1,0,0,13,21,0,0,17,0,26,4,3,4,3,66,56,25,0,5,21,0,12,11,0,1,1,5,0,4,24,11,0,2,23,0,0,3,11,8,0,3,5,17,33,13,23,46,2,26,0,0,0,0,16,9,0,9,23,164,57,1,0.0,0.0917619810106994,0.07557705915081402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06373224752620282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932994993820204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645641837574712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20014109008621134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569358596324098,0.0,0.14984064265068295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0511529853398952,0.0,0.06525240237561312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4307545988453436,0.2766406113521549,0.07436122498565775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04046283905012548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768846811299178,0.06312960747846938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41620338850480376,0.0,0.0,0.13707624143419836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328218424949498,0.0516964458510426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804831794591807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486248899156198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496012616878657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053691969196352524,0.0,0.08091558736612678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350091966784227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675831752992666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984580177521365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463557179821808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659702177641492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474912473391824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06224893120244308,0.13538410981116744,0.0,0.0,0.08992188746273674,0.15435695273126365,0.14887465054749785,0.0760912430161377,0.06148423374350712,0.09031988804445104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0614737904018967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05501609690201471,0.3387043629870635,0.0,0.04987330175427868
mentalhealth,defonotathrowaway112,2020/03/04,"I can feel myself getting worse I have depression, anxiety and probably autism (have been on a waiting list for a diagnosis for a while) and I can feel my mental health getting worse, I'm hardly sleeping having several panic attacks a day and struggling to do anything.  However I've got a really busy few weeks so I'm still doing things but I feel so overwhelmed afterwards and it keeps getting worse.  I can feel myself building up to a breakdown but I can't stop it happening.",3.5007203907203888,6.084660439560437,4.951135531135531,77.57442002442005,76.47252747252746,8.0004884004884,30.990231990231987,8.841846274778883,3.1375557997557992,384,19,64,9,9,128,58,91,0.20600000000000002,0.745,0.049,-0.8932,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,3,6,0,10,2,1,0,0,13,23,9,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,5,9,0,6,21,1,8,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,45,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215233672813936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215751911197735,0.0,0.0,0.1965266654590368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140866593272512,0.0,0.14878826304655593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34938787588156056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707623081970315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13816297280508405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15276116739163598,0.0,0.15474896720349415,0.0,0.0,0.18362386512518705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15354704469778446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17409012989056882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20268346157895886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18625239253752407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106672859760881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19515693987411356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728735277658984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379573914055034,0.14442570745777367,0.0,0.1805945228833035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476660722365377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385686437860145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5281372669583486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DuckDoughABC,2020/03/04,"I'm very confused and nervous I don't know what to do. For a few months I haven't been myself. I haven't been doing schoolwork or participating, I've started sleeping in class and so on. My teachers have obviously noticed. I have talked to two of my teachers because we are fairly close and I open up to them more then anyone. Behind close doors I cry, hurt myself, weed a few times, and other stuff. I don't know what is wronge with me. I constantly feel like crap. My teachers will ask what is wrong but I don't know what to tell them because I don't truly know myself. I feel like I'm blaming the deaths of family members but even when I'm not thinking of them I feel like this. My teachers have become very worried and I don't know what to say or do. They have told my sibling some stuff and I'm scared my parents will find out. I don't know anything right now.",1.4156666666666666,3.5185701222222217,2.7322222222222234,93.285,81.1111111111111,4.888888888888889,22.222222222222207,5.82211442006289,0.14172222222222208,682,22,147,4,18,220,93,180,0.151,0.8009999999999999,0.048,-0.9416,1,0,0,0,0,2,17.0,1,0,4,0,4,10,1,3,3,0,22,2,2,0,1,31,39,13,1,0,5,1,3,3,0,2,0,1,1,0,9,12,0,0,11,0,0,0,9,7,0,1,3,4,29,3,15,34,4,15,0,1,0,0,11,8,1,4,10,99,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412837378142104,0.0,0.11077954177952376,0.0,0.12585011002341895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16412435626000155,0.14867553871907735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14547475669870125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14787208305747188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891423881259615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12690632561691131,0.0,0.20420145045049892,0.2885144147844392,0.0,0.0,0.12303885520748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14411187095887495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4438967881140828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973033737606309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10745118928871557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326403584450474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14947789503444006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496344946695645,0.0,0.1070540213634044,0.1347765864860587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13471570347700634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952836555824214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30821191310538976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820123787469704,0.11766248823206556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625808864634775,0.0,0.0,0.07849712037088039,0.0,0.0,0.12863373004546833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315026976641623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221486947460984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136711604650875,0.0,0.0,0.2943683581455826,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jhharvest,2020/03/04,"Some days it's really, really hard Hey guys. I (40M) had a nervous breakdown 2.5 years ago. I was living in Singapore with my then-wife. We had been going through some difficulties in our marriage. I had previously worked as a freelancer and she didn't like it, so I got a job that didn't really suit me. After a few months the stress from the job and stress from the marriage going south I just hit my breaking point.

Weeks I could do nothing but lie on the sofa. Or if I was feeling too bad I would lie on the floor because getting on the sofa was too much effort. I started medication and therapy but I could see it was breaking the only person I cared for so I left. She's doing pretty good now, so I think that at least was the right choice.

I couldn't work for six months but eventually I got to the stage where I could get up in the morning and go to the office. I made some new friends, later on started dating.

And now since January I've just been drowning. Slowly, slowly. Every day just drowning. I've got a decent job. I've got a therapist. I've got some friends. I've got hobbies. But it just feels like there's no reason to carry on.  I go to work, I come home. If I'm not doing anything that evening all I want to do is drink or take sleep meds so it's the next day.  

This week I'm on holiday, finally had to take all my accrued days off. I'm hating it. All I can do now is play this song on repeat because I don't know what else to do.

 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GS2Y\_CkaXP0](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GS2Y_CkaXP0)",1.9625324675324656,4.320059652597403,3.1436201298701327,89.66757305194807,80.72077922077922,5.668181818181819,20.988636363636363,6.9077264865688965,0.4228714285714292,1215,35,251,14,32,391,156,308,0.083,0.8109999999999999,0.107,0.8822,3,0,1,0,0,0,57.0,2,0,0,4,16,12,1,3,18,0,28,3,1,2,3,40,58,18,2,8,13,0,3,2,2,1,1,1,3,2,12,8,1,0,5,4,0,5,6,5,0,1,20,5,30,7,28,32,10,49,0,0,1,0,11,19,0,8,24,158,42,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336787279924192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773934862565207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785261472144344,0.11466156933424484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588819860025756,0.0,0.0,0.08101401988364881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22526901311722225,0.0,0.0,0.2426127048244247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213123039250036,0.0,0.0,0.07856503162406563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06211781353318072,0.0,0.07923949181904617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510698392581986,0.06718790622871389,0.0,0.10302498120000053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532249486868162,0.0,0.09827239111999583,0.0,0.21379857097391455,0.07888299590489561,0.4513126370133479,0.0,0.0,0.09312230099003477,0.0,0.0,0.08424853037172429,0.0928529239820452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433780692166828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799843687856388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051686318337541934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218342145778983,0.0,0.0,0.09189419935737042,0.0,0.08304610238810624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899048660145409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104466120545283,0.09474346034232392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15013642425085616,0.0,0.0691360974294963,0.0,0.0,0.09083213936298434,0.10002110934945696,0.0,0.0,0.09024158743446367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152773795916506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211908140032301,0.0,0.0,0.08890575402075516,0.0,0.0,0.09568062150757588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807486609869064,0.09669700225661226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031647363220709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749440753670308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779747310804512,0.0,0.09411591506972952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13313530946834512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21546332042258914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14142477524325342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755207834084894,0.10919697063321752,0.0,0.06026215753312315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554719439928639,0.0,0.1508792569739501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20540418081483552,0.0,0.0,0.06680899708931343,0.0,0.0,0.060563825123225626
mentalhealth,Lilin_unite42,2020/03/04,"Anyone find individual therapy unhelpful? Hey guys, just picking your brains for thoughts, challenge, or a similar experience.

I have long-term and developmental trauma and I'm about 2 years into what I consider to be my official recovery. I've had interactions with the mental health system before that, but no one ever correctly identified my issue and I felt like it was all so off-base that I don't consider it part of the work.

I've seen a few individual therapists over the years, most recently an EMDR specialist. I also attend DBT group (I'm about 3/4 of the way through and plan to join the skills group afterwards for another 6 months) and I am lucky to have a local community center for trauma survivors where I go to various events (book clubs, meditations, etc).

I've recently dropped my individual therapist, partly because I felt she was projecting too much of herself onto my path, and partly because she admitted to me she wasn't sure how to perform EMDR on someone with so much repetitive trauma that most of my flashbacks are purely amygdala/emotion-based. It is clear she is less experienced in chronic trauma than in episodic or military trauma.

But as I made that decision, I realized I have generally found individual therapy unhelpful. I find DBT and my community center helpful, and also my regular social network outside of the mental health world. But I have always kind of felt like individual therapy is a constant struggle against how I'm expected to think and recover, and what actually works for me and my personality.

I have also found I have been able to develop a method of trauma processing on my own, reasonably safely and effectively. At this point I also feel like I have people I could call if I wanted support, and the level of social re-integration necessary to actually make the call.

Through my recovery process, I feel individual therapy is the least helpful tool I've used so far. It's so internal and pathology focused, while I have found the most effective and enduring ways to making progress for me are outward- and bonding-focused. I also don't want to be a lifer in therapy. I know people do recover from trauma, I've seen it, but it seems like so many therapists believe (or perhaps just say) that you're basically stuck like this to some degree, in and out of mental health services for the rest of your life. I don't believe that, and the further I get in recovery the more I feel like I have very good reason to not believe that.

Am I missing something about individual therapy? Is there something here I just don't get, or somehow I've been picking the wrong therapists? Has anyone else had this sort of experience and dropped this form of treatment from their path?",8.147211428571431,8.319575104000004,8.956285714285716,62.65600000000002,61.96,12.502857142857144,40.05714285714286,11.966068795916392,5.274334285714287,2192,111,353,67,28,745,240,500,0.08800000000000001,0.7809999999999999,0.13,0.9744,0,0,3,0,0,0,56.0,0,2,1,9,24,23,0,1,21,0,34,7,1,12,6,85,65,42,0,5,13,0,6,6,0,0,6,1,0,2,19,23,0,1,22,2,0,2,7,10,0,1,18,10,50,13,55,44,19,40,0,1,2,0,22,22,0,13,17,251,69,6,0.06487520786612586,0.0,0.12661768903219248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594034014588691,0.0539813699891622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802731202121044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907245075274222,0.0664723170562169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909464913056227,0.0,0.05520402360923346,0.2192764299973204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07242218749801392,0.13248968142878415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07010705236345148,0.0,0.05179757453739218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054194911567297936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235300575744856,0.0,0.05868333969065564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692080373891232,0.0,0.0,0.09840856313701384,0.09269372292447954,0.1868711200279385,0.0,0.11858952935230352,0.0,0.0,0.2133969506169864,0.0,0.0,0.06778923696918236,0.0,0.036870075680071286,0.05441424637471705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642366554531156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068779367806124,0.0,0.0,0.0869689686439473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771286190407806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755754572661206,0.03565371760996359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045823277903676296,0.19016849754038012,0.0,0.0,0.05741251745778642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06138649029983096,0.08660941002976813,0.06577327820973851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19613685215195695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051782771973155464,0.0,0.0953814848373825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04396111983366308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21076058422847813,0.0,0.0899526011678188,0.0566465291552815,0.0,0.0,0.06132804095381885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340503727397912,0.12811288232881182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05159136919532135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059059952698915175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226420898388372,0.05496855309696157,0.09988820906246372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06782165317945962,0.0,0.0,0.07361961708048408,0.06114411564727532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4451427247520615,0.3013004663551262,0.0,0.041569413654532185,0.0,0.051503668414664514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056031349920025716,0.0,0.05352884077095745,0.07653015691623524,0.10298984062353136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09445984797307233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709308555208597,0.0,0.08355501369708883
mentalhealth,zerosuitJ,2020/03/04,"Can you be bipolar if you are not in denial of it/are aware you exhibit symptoms? I just feel like when things are great is life, life is beautiful and amazing. But when things go south, I get into a really dark state of mind that manifests itself. Yesterday, I got into an arguement with my boyfriend. I had very depressing thoughts after and slapped myself in the face a few times because idk I felt like a deserved it. Like, I know I’m depressed and get anxious, but is that it? I feel like there’s more wrong with me.",3.71031553398058,5.249301038834954,4.3244538834951465,86.99017597087378,72.59223300970874,7.868446601941748,28.408980582524272,8.472884824447931,1.9724572815533976,409,16,83,7,8,130,70,103,0.10800000000000001,0.738,0.154,0.5959,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,0,4,9,0,0,5,0,8,5,1,0,0,18,18,8,0,1,5,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,4,3,13,6,9,13,2,12,0,2,0,0,3,5,0,1,9,55,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22544784027641074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165091810483585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34376428103414786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20180871376408765,0.2851337383823361,0.19161046137817364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20852543138068766,0.0,0.11341547390068225,0.0,0.15960766675869745,0.22001740289329325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967385351044392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819125636857417,0.38998293099392295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015003588682099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784429100320413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074209455826132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651597606635345,0.0,0.0,0.1584296439084901,0.11636599197471635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16465924551041122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21818931598850388,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hiimdavid-,2020/03/04,"Loosing time I find myself loosing time a lot trying to remember what happens in the time I’ve lost is like a haze and it’s infuriating to remember things in said time , 
My day has been very scrambled in the morning I was optimistic to an almost unusual extent about the day for almost no reason but soon after my day had been going for a while I became euphorically happy 
I don’t like when I’m in this state because I self harm 
Not out of sadness but put of an almost manic spasm 
I’ll just harm myself because I can 
I stabbed my leg and hit myself until I bruised repeatedly , in the moment I didn’t feel the pain but eventually I came back too and it fucking hurts ,
I used to hit my head into brick walls before but I’ve been able to stop that . 
I was pretty calm and ok I’d like to think around lunch but I’ve found myself having an almost obsession with what it would be like to kill someone and eat them , 
I will never do this I hope but it’s been welling in my mind more than I’d like and I can’t shake it .
My school is making me see a counsiler , it’s been quite good but I struggle to really speak my mind to him I feel as if I was to really talk about my thoughts I would be In trouble ,
I’ve been carrying around a metal pair of scissors because they could be easily used as a stabbing weapon but at the same time I’m allowed to as there not seen as a weapon but I have been thinking about using them as one against certain people I hate 
I’m equally compelled to use them as I am aware of the consequences that will occur if I did ,
So I guess I won’t but I can’t bring myself to leave them . 
In the afternoon I was in a much more neutral state of mind and was happy in a way until the end of the day when I found myself incredibly mad at litteraly nothing , I used to think about killing myself but I don’t anymore not in the way I used to so I guess that’s an improvement . 
I’ve been overwhelmed with work at the moment , 
It’s 12 at night and I’ve left my house without my parents knowing to walk , I like it at night 
I prefer the thought that people can’t see who I am in the dark . As well as the silence 
I’ve had a headache that has been getting worse . It’s probally because I need to wear my glasses but don’t .
I’m going to get my bike again so I can travel further in the night . 
Maby start graffiting around places ,
Idk where I would though since I live in the middle of nowhere it’s mainly fields around me .

I’m sorry if this is sparatic or hard to follow its more me just trying to dump thoughts the internet is a good place to speak because of its anonymous nature .

I’m not really sure what I should be doing . I’m going to just take tommorow as it happens I guess but that’s what I’ve been doing at its not really making anything better .",2.6032323232323242,3.8312519571183534,4.116526014865638,88.62439069944733,74.88336192109776,6.691656184486374,24.44783685915761,7.123485893559443,0.8701054240518391,2173,67,471,22,45,724,242,583,0.141,0.73,0.129,-0.8276,2,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,5,4,25,37,8,4,33,1,52,7,3,11,3,92,104,43,2,11,26,1,3,6,0,7,1,3,0,1,29,17,2,1,16,2,0,10,16,19,2,1,28,9,69,18,79,62,9,76,0,4,3,1,13,33,1,13,35,321,98,2,0.06568315445296531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26308876509056645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514003962723994,0.0,0.0,0.054051639547327626,0.2338877324022241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05050629139516865,0.0,0.2001992065276469,0.0,0.05589152664655589,0.0,0.0,0.05809141242871815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512403050218927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052442654143771375,0.0,0.0,0.16944080316148213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721026482286914,0.0,0.0,0.05817577905220559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642275289877866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060033213219336475,0.0,0.0,0.14403637720479653,0.0,0.06072301788751624,0.06863347445889836,0.0,0.11198775103352566,0.11018382727798362,0.0,0.0,0.21707219944275608,0.0,0.1161667931216169,0.13984187857695146,0.05883920490351152,0.0648485165968352,0.06740986605926086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523819288171517,0.0,0.07578954144959578,0.07031517533321202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533735726649238,0.0,0.036097743924461904,0.0,0.0,0.06954897666688199,0.07136493949946296,0.0,0.0,0.1925368288886079,0.0,0.05799942875314245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170092213783189,0.05584146906408012,0.0,0.0,0.08768803127081494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989637855047875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04828467612354402,0.04870322675864572,0.05065889795215643,0.0,0.0,0.1849175728655972,0.0,0.06302475818209202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044508605350727516,0.0,0.0698915073446752,0.0,0.07293336994275443,0.0,0.0,0.09107285803452267,0.0,0.13724983291311094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682338159893965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660297120342225,0.0,0.06986211986002118,0.0,0.0,0.16831324262345132,0.06753322229157455,0.0,0.0,0.14881241965896072,0.0,0.06247972117579284,0.0,0.0,0.06647485896265777,0.10468194014467733,0.0,0.06852185505814783,0.0,0.0,0.05433378411448255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05565312361810487,0.0,0.0,0.0735269138510354,0.04649087479114949,0.0,0.0,0.05491405821964464,0.0,0.06866629437603551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061905595743716416,0.0,0.0493855577791994,0.05279363151562333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04363696921888675,0.12626133961177674,0.06453336575844794,0.15643526326831658,0.19150187785730044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918910063613801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.340374938167421,0.0,0.05419548132011167,0.0,0.10427246141116152,0.0,0.0,0.11811408816590015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331621698382592,0.0,0.047818118724352696,0.0,0.06693674585644488,0.13997828514486038,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mystical-Prince,2020/03/04,"Estrangement and pressure Who had taught that when a child is not given the love, care, and safety by one's own parents and family that it would roam around in life constantly looking restlessly for connectivity with strangers but never actually feeling truly accepted and comforted but it rather continuously feels as if being assessed for approval just like during the toughest kinds of job interviews around the world. Also it seems as if when you are a person that is introverted, doesn't like to rush things, likes to go deep in life, the chance on social rejection and alienation is even higher. In a world so demanding, impatient, lacking of empathy, it takes too much of an individual already crushed in one's development to keep up with the pace.",22.515989974937348,10.720598443609022,19.08947368421053,37.16298245614036,49.526315789473685,22.84611528822055,65.38596491228071,16.728156217252725,9.3810671679198,615,28,96,17,3,196,97,133,0.17800000000000002,0.655,0.16699999999999998,0.0123,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,10,11,0,2,9,0,8,3,0,0,1,24,19,15,0,5,7,1,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,2,9,9,0,1,4,0,0,2,3,3,0,2,3,3,1,8,21,14,3,18,0,1,1,1,8,11,0,3,8,72,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.18532649884033287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20957236791306766,0.15187237911891646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381234895844584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936277131811662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052271630898422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254349373313972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903192124566722,0.0,0.1920502008999569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079312391498226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884581343891952,0.16880231294460027,0.0,0.1977638908979843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682806083158496,0.27834390366992506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15947806182523544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17140279301551867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396070073164114,0.0,0.14647166978923798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573782695339412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21087455335014296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582363807218162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288854881220844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19359114007077716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14279002117700648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616894572140702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490787724837078,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jakeelikesreddit,2020/03/04,"I feel super weird and bad for two years So let me start from the beginning about two years ago I had a thought(insecurity) and I googled it and ever since then I have been googling every insecurity that comes to my head which became something really bad for me because I became a self-help guru but depressed almost every day and in my head all the time even did nofap which I found out was a toxic mindset lol. I have stopped doing all those things but I don’t know I feel like I have lost myself and I don’t know myself for all the time lost in that also I have become shy, introverted and with not very good social skills. What can I do to feel better? Any tips or anything would help",4.8272581934452425,5.42216705755396,5.374340527577939,84.03946442845725,69.07194244604317,7.616626698641088,24.077537969624306,7.3871296695380915,0.8882463629096717,547,12,112,5,9,176,88,139,0.17800000000000002,0.7090000000000001,0.113,-0.7639,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,5,5,11,0,1,6,1,15,2,2,0,4,26,26,12,0,1,4,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,9,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,7,0,2,7,3,19,4,11,17,3,15,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,2,12,79,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295524966671116,0.0,0.1463473679499626,0.0,0.0,0.11687550664772267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938650526410336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026838437450475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440570470060413,0.08909122951230929,0.16141037009649042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292571396047575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589464248704166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425417903145483,0.0,0.12587813942083928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653020474811527,0.1322003686064482,0.2462741018836201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22169236429493352,0.10440905717633726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16024511488138654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258306132711705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999825999635158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19592153024452408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063961714087438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14944751544209015,0.0,0.07140114384735073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190783530674806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936269552999958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246554722862,0.0,0.0,0.120896174235015,0.0,0.0,0.14898076075153904,0.0,0.11251283692361486,0.0,0.0,0.10344519511555472,0.0,0.0,0.1221873215472274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709507113767056,0.0,0.0,0.1160261836646479,0.17044161211365128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28553317218867713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058844159687918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382023772621736,0.0,0.0,0.1882306574216816
mentalhealth,BitcoinBarry56,2020/03/04,"Something weird is going on (mood swings????) Something really weirds happening with my mood, and its happened before, a year ago.

So, starting in about mid-December, my mental wellbeing started a pretty clear decline, and my mood just got worse and worse. It eventually became more like a spiral, and into February, shit got really bad. Its so hazy, but I remember being completely hopeless, definitely thought of suicide more than once, if not constantly, and it felt like I was going completely insane. I felt so hopeless.

Until this morning. Everything completely changed. I felt full of life, like I could do anything, and my day? A complete fucking breeze. It was like I could look at everything with searing optimism. 

But why? Why does everything feel so different? I can't even remember what I was going through that well. I know that it happened, I texted friends about wanting to die, wrote notes in random places about how shitty I felt, but the memories feel so... vague. 

This isn't the first time it's happened, either. Last year, I think, I had a similar low. I don't know if it was as extreme as this year, but I was definitely suicidal at one point, but then it just faded away.

I feel so strange, this doesn't feel normal at all, I want to welcome this burning happiness, but I feel like I'm going crazy.

Can anyone here make sense of what the fuck is going on?",4.928228346456692,6.84728115354331,5.390559055118112,79.03505118110238,70.14173228346456,8.859527559055119,31.20393700787401,9.3871,3.0306840944881888,1079,47,190,24,20,345,139,254,0.20800000000000002,0.627,0.165,-0.9317,1,0,2,0,0,3,53.0,0,0,0,1,15,21,3,0,8,0,17,4,1,2,2,47,51,25,3,7,12,0,9,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,18,9,0,0,15,0,0,5,5,9,1,2,14,10,22,9,24,34,5,32,0,3,1,2,3,13,3,3,19,124,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595605747587655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05991410768621825,0.0,0.07051282338119345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050544133048754,0.0,0.07154478519011652,0.0,0.0,0.07291303982524086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064512871943084,0.0,0.3593633472076495,0.0925968428893939,0.0,0.13682765741242314,0.0,0.0,0.055260809509911836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892922890881287,0.08952432625865638,0.0,0.0,0.07498497697754629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05659523335042992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310289451125437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21662875922307712,0.06121456978375009,0.3290905390817796,0.0,0.0,0.07288503250764594,0.0,0.0,0.06620130394453178,0.15843188000713213,0.0,0.0,0.2434885286125261,0.0,0.13706290543170715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30308973547312856,0.0912150470177403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418229911699234,0.06984606749390436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060523024741171084,0.20931087881108665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195521690601822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057196513495484186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635200345409264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395473758302754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912535005024477,0.05806350102092803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952432625865638,0.0,0.0810015937266187,0.0,0.0,0.0871741420589912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978614200436557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19413257307676124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795612910351182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319315602246286,0.0,0.0,0.12129892341619382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18745460551261267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054904554326686034,0.0,0.06802563981289801,0.049964582771611164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108042882099033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704260136623925,0.0,0.15463777285425606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746440617829765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16553820653777646
mentalhealth,Sara_2420,2020/03/04,"Mental Health Resources/ Needs Hi,

I'm doing a business project for one of my university courses. For this project I need to create a product/ service that people as the public would be interested in. For my service I am thinking about doing a cafe that is better suited for those suffering from mental illness or an item or product that can create a safer environment in places where socializing may occur.

I would be very grateful if people would be wiling to comment things that they don't like about cafes, how people cope while being in social situations, or even your opinions on this idea. I am open to any comments surrounding this topic. Feel free to reach out to me through messages if you feel uncomfortable posting in the comments.

Thanks A lot!!!!",7.255782643957826,8.564620401459855,6.9700243309002445,72.20342254663423,63.96350364963504,8.716626115166262,34.930251419302515,8.841846274778883,3.2060679643146788,613,27,96,9,9,193,94,137,0.071,0.764,0.165,0.9161,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,1,5,6,0,0,8,0,15,2,0,1,0,20,22,8,0,7,5,0,2,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,10,6,21,14,2,12,0,1,0,0,11,10,0,8,2,75,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122914687625005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15766459158926407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177451037070564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18027649475507215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18949178860097893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124419088743756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709331042077695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15155807107523947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3593067825715394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643686574294793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079980140680895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3707681832792257,0.0,0.18625333717348785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17073258412691858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20038201323385826,0.0,0.36344593219955057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16412629803459836,0.0,0.0,0.11843411345061147,0.11422768421426165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470907328824875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3799119049792563,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hypothermiiia,2020/03/04,"What helps you get up in the morning when you feel like you don’t have a good reason to? For almost two years I have had very little to motivate me to get up out of bed, despite being in an amazing relationship, seeking therapy, emotional support animals and medication and having a (now) healthy home life. Being too emotionally & mentally exhausted to push myself to try anymore has resulted in me dropping out of college and disappointing a lot of family and friends.

For those of you who have felt or currently feel this way; what helps?",11.558500000000002,8.593056650000001,11.27,58.790000000000006,57.5,15.2,47.0,13.427899808715575,6.3195,435,22,72,13,4,145,72,100,0.049,0.715,0.23600000000000002,0.9625,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,4,0,1,4,7,0,0,5,0,9,3,0,3,0,15,15,6,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,3,0,2,0,5,6,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,2,3,8,5,18,11,1,15,0,1,0,0,9,8,0,3,5,55,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18530265258533293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20050355400493985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835216662070087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4163167479144165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17445037308825,0.0,0.18713550614640276,0.1322010468635417,0.17767875333107214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297056593088842,0.0,0.19336386134168054,0.0,0.0,0.15521267477602854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480726490776435,0.0,0.1856220491735652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13070756289550595,0.09040696486639063,0.18547052401969386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732442756761245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18642022565925445,0.18648869535019813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190264076445162,0.0,0.19867638546104646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20999459598062567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116228670768336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563802885225664,0.0,0.18076872494815516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268711977569202,0.0,0.1468855097969581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916729561560795
mentalhealth,curiouscat294,2020/03/05,"FOLLOW FOR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE AND RELATIONSHIP MANAGEMENT ​

Are you seeking to better your mental health and find fulfillment and happiness?

FOLLOW: [https://www.instagram.com/EMPATHYQUEEN/](https://www.instagram.com/EMPATHYQUEEN/)

Due to my extensive education, background and skills, and a lifetime of dealing with crazy and mentally unstable toxic individuals, I have mastered emotional intelligence and NOW teaching others emotional intelligence, mental health and personal development and how mastering EI can lead to success in every aspect of life and lead to personal happiness.

I will be soon starting classes and launching my podcast as well which will all be announce on the instagrapm page",17.591224489795913,19.168716489795926,13.968285714285715,29.826714285714306,42.265306122448976,16.819591836734702,55.31428571428572,15.112257680678324,9.576303673469392,608,35,54,22,5,182,70,98,0.040999999999999995,0.693,0.266,0.9765,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,0,7,4,5,0,0,2,0,7,3,0,4,1,18,10,13,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,2,12,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,11,6,2,10,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,4,44,8,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16502431694362424,0.18506939106532666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470295713527125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570215876127018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5139738342623714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283250189931315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920562453012678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3242667683245133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32378993939107936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075787728214795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4604681905107158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659767860313825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16352046708722984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780351264238763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694207362237806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18506939106532666,0.0
mentalhealth,gothicxtoy,2020/03/05,"Trying to understand the mental wellness of abusers Cw/tw: abuse, dissociation, anger management, similar subjects, physical abuse, gaslighting

So I started reading more about dissociative identity problems so I had a question that someone here might help answer this -

I've heard of people who hurt/abuse others, you hear them say something like ""how'd you'd get that (enter mark here"" like they genuinely dont remember that they physically hurt you go cause said mark, even though it literally happened within 24 hours of said remark.

Some stories I've read they say things like ""it was an impulse one moment I was fine and then the next I've seen I've hurt someone""

So my question is this:
Is this a type of dissociative amnesia? What exactly is the psychology behind this (severe anger management problems, PTSD/cptsd, a type of dissociation, all of the above or something else all together?)",6.298461538461537,8.826569458598726,6.3314649681528685,71.17947084762375,67.78980891719746,9.416756491915727,34.36991670749633,9.851270322608157,3.9213952964233214,723,35,112,18,13,229,102,157,0.185,0.7290000000000001,0.086,-0.9641,0,0,2,0,4,0,26.0,0,3,4,0,9,11,2,0,8,0,9,0,0,1,3,15,19,7,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,6,0,0,13,1,0,0,5,2,0,2,1,6,1,1,7,7,11,5,10,10,4,8,0,2,1,0,17,1,0,5,8,66,24,6,0.0,0.5331237315566657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555707006899613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183613394571184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397002808931464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429784678877131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05877079893595698,0.0,0.06393002492510938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947354837287137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267831473948738,0.0,0.07539892759324893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077889130358158,0.0,0.3612650297163256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16486915965700558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336233712139805,0.11933292915545232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963320399420335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622537884349595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798562829971872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152733395278726,0.13149348538712413,0.0,0.2520265881124533,0.0,0.22503864961789768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742797685679647,0.0,0.2140053762247556,0.17891135061380686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12708041991522567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906229322705397,0.17319887679372115,0.0,0.0,0.07962021087373794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473261595327083,0.0,0.11051975711710722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637256808125513,0.0,0.0,0.1171048950855094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114101583563387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheRealJoker89,2020/03/05,"Can you get low self esteem occasionally? Or is it always a chronic thing? I feel fine most the time then sometimes something can easily knock my confidence. It usually doesn’t get to me for long though. Other times out of nowhere I can just feel like being all negative about myself. It sort of feels good when I have these rants. I am usually quite jokey, chatty and sociable though. Some people I don’t reveal that side to me and tbh it rarely ever happens especially this last year or 2. I am feeling a bit low tonight and it’s like I know I should keep up appearances but my take is it’s only online and who gives a fuck",1.7235657142857157,4.216669408000001,3.1849428571428566,88.13090000000004,82.92,6.451428571428572,20.92857142857143,7.7094869923839395,0.951457142857143,496,15,100,9,14,162,91,125,0.096,0.7759999999999999,0.128,-0.1926,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,6,7,1,0,4,0,12,2,0,0,2,23,25,11,0,1,4,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,12,5,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,4,14,4,8,23,4,17,0,2,0,1,4,5,1,6,13,67,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482688742851991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19453801118091696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16118362162680072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3603941354650909,0.12729941787394453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647343611890938,0.1861944936946063,0.17093668409653645,0.0,0.1494578417827589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15757338091894635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15838401457821802,0.0,0.0,0.09792890723545948,0.14524914189821767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741098769228515,0.0,0.0,0.15769309550784616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355219996444895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353494285950573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18952766326231146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18589168347010446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13717984848318573,0.17623508412875544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13397717366079784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838193322040587,0.0,0.3501427680453152,0.0,0.20780877244126464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39250359700138504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474892008334547
mentalhealth,psychological180,2020/03/05,"My friend opened up to me a lot today and I don't know how to react. Now I don't want to get into specifics because this was said to me in complete confidence and I don't want to betray that. So my friend, let's just call him Mike, and I were talking with it just being the two of us. I'll say that I've known Mike for a couple years now, and I would consider him my best friend, and it was mostly our normal joking and hanging around, but then he started talking about how he might be a sociopath. He said that he has homicidal impulses and a tendency to hurt animals. He also said that he's a compulsive liar. This really surprised me, but he also said that he was ""testing"" me after he revealed a lie that he had during the conversation. I really don't know how to react to this news. He's still my best friend and he's still the same person I knew before this happened. I think I just need some help with this.",3.5724889246878777,4.227147183246078,4.905445026178012,86.0615747080145,71.93193717277488,7.971163914619412,25.16351188078936,8.139509932561175,1.3162135320177204,716,20,154,10,13,239,99,191,0.057999999999999996,0.7809999999999999,0.161,0.9575,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,2,0,0,2,15,10,1,0,9,0,15,0,0,5,0,40,29,17,0,5,5,0,0,0,4,2,0,5,0,1,13,13,0,0,6,1,0,1,4,2,0,1,10,5,21,8,18,14,6,15,0,1,0,0,31,5,0,4,9,107,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20786963206747328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569846633905975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922686981363086,0.0,0.11059261377992163,0.0,0.2727853606005933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327111613439316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13626825859836578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380636366805338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4016497052605567,0.0,0.06790255865801073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492966874024987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711435264357655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391327003405905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285327639768555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290038665663667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104935647966919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787478422133173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963691183605692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12734037547698368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11348244767787692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16652078188177946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4945147207566884,0.10335522657158623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199153554316304,0.0,0.2075841336542656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20892561182551314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832778085506169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319381934428968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695918321196709,0.0,0.15633467927270595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331618119477733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232505268342688,0.0,0.0,0.08369469066773444
mentalhealth,shrimpanzee6,2020/03/05,https://anchor.fm/shrimpanzee/episodes/What-is-anxiety-and-panic-attacks-eav250 What is anxiety and panic attacks. I will give my experience on it,25.311904761904763,33.297659714285714,11.515714285714285,20.81261904761905,59.0,10.438095238095238,33.23809523809524,8.841846274778883,5.655266666666668,132,4,9,3,3,30,14,14,0.441,0.5589999999999999,0.0,-0.7845,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513537899644369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3737937853783222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214027677308802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31519257733257433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7710080274370933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stay_alive_frens,2020/03/05,"I want to cut because I sort of like how it feels but I don't necessarily feel depressed, I don't know how common that is and I don't really know how to explain why I do this sometimes. I do know that something triggered it yesterday (I was reading a book and there was this drug addict dude) so I suddenly got really into the mood(??) of the book and felt like self harming?? oh man
and now I just wznt more but I'm scared that someone will see",0.7938709677419382,2.956566935483873,2.882161290322582,90.96324193548388,83.94623655913979,5.870537634408603,22.203225806451613,7.1686216300943375,0.7215729032258067,347,12,76,5,10,117,58,93,0.126,0.7759999999999999,0.098,-0.6745,0,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,1,1,3,0,9,2,0,4,0,21,20,10,0,1,3,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,7,5,0,0,7,3,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,4,10,2,5,15,1,5,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,1,6,48,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519428618745025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14088186716053108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19905379478292284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680130027564961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337112522229263,0.0,0.22190082892086987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18483893468624202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810342947332273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258163125074532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311714853194398,0.0,0.29610861476317485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313803701822187,0.0,0.1841639065578973,0.0,0.2410970315349884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958178582379075,0.17791895601953894,0.22857265501388174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13631404297211286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085398752244862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SomeguyIsuppose,2020/03/05,"Is this common Thoughts you wish to die, but not suicidal. Like you just want it all to end but you don't want to kill yourself. Is there a term for this or anyone else go through it? You dont want to live anymore, but don't want to end it yourself, like you just wish you would have an accident. Sorry if this isn't the type of post that belongs here",1.1343428571428582,2.9187721866666685,2.119238095238096,98.952,80.46666666666667,5.352380952380952,21.38095238095238,6.1826913282559595,-0.0617047619047626,274,8,66,2,7,86,46,75,0.11599999999999999,0.619,0.265,0.914,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,6,0,0,4,3,1,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,1,17,16,5,3,8,8,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,0,6,2,8,14,2,6,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,2,6,43,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18929581597207815,0.13346360747556987,0.1955730700197196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19809717875379496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22370302148450025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15945081658128216,0.0,0.3381155930673848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847814867823304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21117390926088256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18650288587330674,0.0,0.16854532564867136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18280462356085386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21366792579475405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20878528326457893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15153271309340555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4503299538826345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4389915859143087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13559148288568162,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw_away_chord_c,2020/03/05,"What constitutes suicidal thoughts Lately, I am going through persistent low moods, helplessness and lack of interest in anything. I believed that I never had suicidal thoughts. But in restrospect, I sometimes get mild thoughts that I was better of dying. I am very self-controlled and I have confidence that I wouldn't commit suicide but does this constitute a suicidal thought. 

As a matter of fact I have decent education, good family and earn sufficient to keep my family happy. However, there are a few bad decisions in my life that haunt me and I find it hard to undo them. Like moving to a different country leaving my aging parents alone, who were okay when I left but they have health issues. I believe staying with them would give them a sense of confidence that they aren't alone but moving back to another country would disrupt my family here. Similarly a few other things at work make me feel helplessness and would result in thoughts of being better off dying. Can this thought grow and make me do things which otherwise I wouldn't do to myself ? 

Thanks for reading.",6.645014727540499,8.462743943298975,6.541089837997053,72.84731958762887,65.75257731958763,10.285125184094257,34.47569955817379,10.451354775682146,4.084130780559647,871,40,138,23,14,275,116,194,0.171,0.665,0.165,-0.077,3,2,0,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,5,5,4,13,0,0,6,1,19,2,0,3,3,35,33,12,6,7,4,1,2,1,0,5,2,0,0,0,14,7,0,1,9,1,0,4,4,4,0,0,9,2,26,8,20,18,3,18,0,3,0,0,8,8,0,0,6,103,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20111421823266654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180849467166317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989771107208697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465707073844588,0.08106702159594772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187768666408866,0.0,0.1717383940568604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889593601784776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20153048754859135,0.10143954546635137,0.0,0.0,0.08496508490251414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745865736890329,0.0,0.049092182625398564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873951585368113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050726097840094485,0.0931386400305071,0.05517911544480813,0.08143541685691867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033552923083491,0.08697456418460328,0.0,0.0,0.10320331005604867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133789408311432,0.0,0.08629903989512416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952300140116396,0.10280546695025444,0.10548977541768144,0.0,0.06857832252492928,0.047433812227559005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961814009029607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20638496970990344,0.0,0.0,0.07488264973475439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780818802170693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971173845259412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10128720281954877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602559069265858,0.0,0.0,0.10348620518864346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4248076645410103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938844975538217,0.0,0.0,0.12900603896240342,0.0,0.0,0.4624769783404572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011033419505319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068348464256673,0.0,0.0,0.2069122172154944,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Planes-are-life,2020/03/05,"Earworms, obsessions, and childhood memories :) When I was in 3rd-6th grade I went to a babysistter who would play some CD's when her youngest went down for a nap during the day. I borrowed these at some point and ripped copies into my computer. Havent listened to them in years but played a few tracks this past week and cant get them out of my head. Its driving me nuts. 

I barely ever listen to music because they always end up on repeat in my mind and it interferes with my thought process. I have a really hard time getting out of these cycles. Had an exam today and it was hard to study and recall the material during the exam. Not ideal. 

I really enjoyed this babysitter's care and so theres a of associated emotion and memories that I havent remembered in years. 

I'm overwhelmed by it all and have a tendency towards earworms. Sometimes I think my headphones also pick up the radio frequencies and will just play music without being plugged into anything. This happened a lot when I was a kid and was SO overwhelming. It doesnt really make senese that headphones would play music when not plugged in!! 

I feel like I'm going crazy but what kind of crazy? What does it all mean? What can I do for relief?",3.8034615384615336,5.8682169957265,4.605478632478633,82.88257692307694,73.48717948717949,7.244102564102565,27.51196581196581,8.07648339933343,1.8989750427350427,963,37,177,15,20,310,136,234,0.09300000000000001,0.794,0.113,0.7098,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,3,1,10,13,0,3,13,0,17,1,1,2,3,40,33,20,0,3,6,0,3,1,0,3,0,2,0,1,17,16,0,1,5,7,1,4,7,3,0,0,8,5,21,10,28,21,6,35,0,2,0,0,8,16,0,3,16,127,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952401134969885,0.13476854080992398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328407319496166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987328633132032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651349525515521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10445455771519073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14173738450336087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18218975257776693,0.1434536465185069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14650736099418324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189478740436629,0.11570841739733127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16924091683462386,0.0,0.09204891057696904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143225843720138,0.0,0.2901791308745124,0.0,0.16622366309606787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866248226199435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912832064926012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13769755205175865,0.0,0.0,0.10811344555041552,0.0,0.0,0.176428264807629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635393114957963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461470631663807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15311005614968276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.311278363672891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18347570582736286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018834190283926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378116045721314,0.0,0.1285827729084323,0.09444357477058984,0.0,0.15352466347545293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991921479970195,0.0,0.0,0.3002878839870558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15612927507057578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301117494208703,0.0,0.0,0.20860136146175345
mentalhealth,Good_Draw,2020/03/05,"Opinions on how to react to this please?? Myself, my boyfriend and our flat mate (also a friend) were just having a conversation regarding mental health. 

I was telling them how I don’t feel physically ill but mentally im not 100% at the moment and I don’t feel up for going to work tomorrow.
We were discussing the point that I think companies should introduce mental health: “self care” days. They disagreed. 

Anyway, they thought I went upstairs but I was still stood in the hallway. My boyfriend (who knows I’ve been struggling) and our flat mate started to laugh about the situation and continued to say “just get over it” ect and just going off on how people just need to get on with it all. 

I’m not really sure how I should be feeling right now but I’m angry? Am I overreacting or is that completely uncalled for? Especially from my boyfriend who knows I’ve been struggling. 

Any quick advice would be really appreciated. Thanks!!",3.772819472616632,6.382332103448281,4.270730223123735,82.6737626774848,75.66666666666666,7.5423935091277885,26.32724814063557,8.4952907291091,2.0357089925625442,742,28,136,15,17,234,109,174,0.085,0.7879999999999999,0.127,0.8656,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,3,0,3,1,14,7,0,2,6,0,16,3,0,5,2,36,35,14,0,4,10,0,3,0,3,3,3,1,0,1,7,7,0,0,7,0,0,3,4,2,0,0,9,4,18,5,19,21,1,21,0,0,0,0,16,10,0,2,8,91,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509609646483496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187419875043715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097368990873386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138855157497386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556818444213865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09575940134763797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252327515487737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471777721649774,0.0,0.15515272127998378,0.0,0.16877288582441485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31566146583507915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038737111221815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16320500298443325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44890852464529535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009843558546978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293957773669027,0.0,0.0,0.16299000077134454,0.14036464887605968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902443219316059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680386938415952,0.0,0.11807982628353487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549003946433007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16690137470172456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509719630839186,0.0,0.11857890139758212,0.0,0.0,0.3104538278630913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399436895453704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978088999915122,0.13670341127229915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514205999170693,0.0,0.11787910098574945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13764544425603153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809756179567527,0.0,0.0,0.10547822828220944,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Syckobot,2020/03/05,"My $2500 hospital visit makes me want to kill myself. This past week I went to the ER after extreme dehydration. I had the signs of stroke but im only 28. I had been working out at the gym on a freak-warm day and had pushed myself probably past my limit. 



I went to the ER just to have things checked out and the doctor ordered a CT scan. I was still dehydrated after drinking at home and they wouldnt give me water after asking. I got the CT done and after they finally gave me water I started to think clearer and realized I should have just gone home, I was fine, and now I have a risk of Cancer down the road. 


Now I have to deal with this, emptying my savings and explaining to my parents what happened. I can't focus at work and im paralyzed with anxiety and fear. I just want to die...",2.5976313320825533,3.975009579268297,4.439756097560977,85.70111632270171,75.15853658536584,7.485178236397751,24.81050656660413,8.139509932561175,1.4038045028142596,617,20,130,10,13,210,94,164,0.127,0.8420000000000001,0.03,-0.9537,1,0,1,0,0,2,17.0,0,0,2,3,7,5,1,2,10,0,14,6,0,1,0,28,28,10,2,4,4,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,2,0,4,13,3,1,3,2,1,5,2,3,2,0,12,2,24,2,23,14,0,27,0,0,1,0,9,8,0,0,13,91,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338472874850187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15078232467340774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040172907015633,0.16628064400599196,0.0,0.0,0.1673912766988095,0.0,0.0,0.16508490194765482,0.0,0.16505342162566272,0.0,0.1580006452071777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18149362040317613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766829058149916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472195849214482,0.0,0.0,0.12899659093967467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426262725924852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32356963643171033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484370113232882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844105857050474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076608617235068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266664300054728,0.0,0.0,0.17909101943881006,0.0,0.307934918407791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17389553223926152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416033795619494,0.0,0.12880464877768946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715245036345376,0.10334671241495877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19026345147958373,0.0,0.1293753477984823,0.0,0.0,0.2990308207326449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348388847714597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theocleops,2020/03/05,"This is a vent // please don't take it too seriously I don't think there's anything in this world for me.

I've been feeling suicidal on and off since I was five years old. I'm 20 right now. 

The emotions I feel the most are anger, fear, and apathy. My head feels like it's about to explode and I am so sick of being alive. 

I went to a crisis center a few days ago and left after 18 hours. I hate places like that. The only times I don't feel anxious are when I'm very drunk or when I'm alone. I hardly ever leave my room after my roommate gets home from work. Places like the hospital make me feel like I'm losing my mind even more. 

I feel like I'm a narcissist and abusive to the people around me. They all tell me this isn't true. I hate talking about anything related to myself because immediately after I feel like I've said too much and have confirmed my narcissism. 

I think it's very likely I have DID/dissociative identity disorder (multiple personality disorder) or if that's not what I have then I'm probably just psychotic.

I can't sleep, I've been losing weight and I can't bring myself to care enough to try to eat more. It doesn't matter anyways because I dont have enough money to feed myself enough. I don't have enough money for therapy either. I get SSI and food stamps and that's my only source of income. 

My bf smokes and drinks all the time and my roommate is a borderline alcoholic. I don't think this living situation is helping me, but I have no where else to go. And I care about them, I don't want to leave them. 

Everyone tells me I should keep trying and get help. The kind of help I need costs money that I don't have. I already have a lot of debt. 

At this point I feel that it won't be much longer before I end up dead. I'm tired of pretending like everything is and will be fine. It's not ever going to be good for me. My brain is fried and I don't want to continue with this sad pathetic life.",1.9572949080622384,3.6271664480198034,3.661714285714286,89.369,77.58910891089107,7.092390381895332,21.443847241867047,7.957251820313856,0.8250152192362088,1511,40,335,25,35,505,198,404,0.158,0.73,0.11199999999999999,-0.9652,4,1,3,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,3,3,17,22,3,1,13,0,39,13,3,1,5,51,75,23,2,5,8,0,10,8,1,3,4,1,2,1,18,17,7,1,11,3,5,4,17,8,0,1,5,11,52,14,34,63,14,37,0,3,0,0,12,15,0,5,26,207,70,1,0.0,0.0911227879086923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817384077264617,0.0821907071636356,0.0,0.07965295529627084,0.08486931671077988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688356166378487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657660635284915,0.06846396261744046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09376417207331716,0.0,0.06544260105751648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08585418261708827,0.0,0.0,0.15682460314398894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04959896226436923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762852702815806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013499389464083,0.07534005150990747,0.0,0.0786955521109226,0.06424633106730374,0.08651056364336386,0.06811720001493854,0.3178639424149059,0.0,0.050796665271211,0.13913443756501664,0.0,0.07348839302869115,0.06911948408669129,0.0,0.0,0.0865422966593918,0.3110938619791398,0.2197708765876283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299683020690472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054295233180147,0.0,0.08741658654344052,0.06450634545323981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889399599678407,0.15186042877860573,0.07892926238629895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464838830328145,0.0,0.07714447318820078,0.0,0.07573837606171842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835890199394062,0.0,0.08008730567733685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16286783371481758,0.08356020215176828,0.0,0.054322027615690265,0.30058488022144386,0.0,0.0679107139344823,0.0,0.0,0.17207959611015985,0.0,0.0653839893394902,0.0,0.0,0.05133634015996759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765463103809876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307169391620825,0.0570259219995061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070146312933726,0.0,0.0,0.11698320839247847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331796314324121,0.06715264515940124,0.16070389555367415,0.08442131826179004,0.07270242738445072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291927124139091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656785677860346,0.07315662520634036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636186622747836,0.08644722992419145,0.07696302175763292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08412430063510601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057824853777656324,0.06181531929701487,0.13444105487534844,0.0,0.08795040604230071,0.0,0.0,0.1478376235713411,0.0,0.0,0.0896907402342557,0.08839383482216248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443026129022616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269134509629898,0.0907240487285898,0.0,0.0,0.09365259176027924,0.0,0.07129400455139381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055989561473028866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495258956705768
mentalhealth,throwaway2211184,2020/03/05,Call me I'm struggling with thoughts and text doesn't in any way translate what I'd say if I were to narrate what's inside my head. I need someone to talk to me in real time to even attempt to seek help. Help me.,0.005531914893616374,1.9438495531914943,1.6334468085106373,100.09400000000002,85.38297872340425,3.76,22.16595744680852,3.1291,-0.4305540425531915,167,6,40,0,5,54,35,47,0.061,0.823,0.11699999999999999,0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,6,5,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,6,0,8,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,21,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020599581936502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034050070181966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19625289252295994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049431683223867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39832265059774624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203196229799469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33820128170998703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362913030506257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517589907124707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106268946681772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388234571993646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358896286608357,0.17326006647796693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358495618693272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,d15ddd,2020/03/05,"Contemplating suicide because of my laziness and procrastination, and I can't do seem to do anything about it. I'm 18M from Russia.

Last year, I basically failed my biology exam(technically I just barely passed but no way any university that requires biology would accept me with that result even with good results on other exams) because I haven't studied at all and biology is not a subject you can take lightly in my country, unlike Russian, English and social studies where I haven't really studied specifically for the exam for the most part(there was also a compulsory maths exam but its difficulty was a total joke unless you are doing the non-compulsory part of it).

Anyway, I finished school with most of my exam results ranging from good to very good except for biology, which my parents weren't really all too happy about, and neither was I, but I coped pretty well and didn't stress out too much about it even when I inevitably didn't get accepted into a universtity that I was hoping to enter. I figured I'll just try to take a biology exam next year, **actually study in advance** and everything will be fine.

Oh how naive I was in thinking that I would actually study for the exam. I'm currently slightly less than a month away from my second try at the exam and I barely studied yet again. I hate myself for not being able to just sit down and study for god's sake. My parents stress out over me not studying, and I hate myself yet again for making them worry about me so much, but everytime I try to actually sit down and study I either procrastinate or study for a bit and then go watch YouTube videos or something. This cycle repeats until it's too late and I have to go to bed.

You're probably thinking that I lack the motivation to even get a degree in the first place and that might be true, but at this point I want to do a decent job on the exam not even to get into a university, but to prove to myself that I can actually be productive. You see, I'm not passionate at all about university and maybe pursuing something that I'm actually sort of passionate about that doesn't   
quite require a degree(writing, becoming a youtuber) would've been wiser if I can't even study for an exam, but I'm afraid that I can't become a writer or a youtuber while being such a lazy person. FFS, I wanted to become a writer for almost a year now and I still haven't written the first page of my fantasy book. I'm afraid that I can't do anything productive, and if I can't even study for an exam, then how am I going to write a book or start a YouTube channel?

And so, after a mental breakdown, I decided that if I were to keep being unproductive and subsequently fail the exam because of that, I would kill myself. It was an impulsive decision, and I tend to ignore such stuff later most of the time, but I don't think I'm going to be able to ignore this decision so easily. It seems silly to kill yourself over education, but I think this is a problem of self-actualization rather than just education, since I basically stand to inherit my father's passive income(he's a landlord among some other stuff, basically he made sure he wouldn't be dependent on the meager pension that the government pays him) and I won't have to worry about income that much unless I royally screw up, which means that I can basically continue to be a jobless, uneducated parasite on society who only plays video games and doesn't contribute to anything. Would've been a dream way of life for some, but what's the problem about this other than maybe an ethical one?

The problem is that I *do* want to become a writer and *do* want to become a Youtuber, but can't even get myself to study for an exam and haven't written anything yet, let alone recorded a video. My original plan was to force myself to study and somehow magically fix my laziness by doing that and start on writing after the exam, but you can see how that plan worked out. If I can't even study, then how can I write a successful novel or make a decent video? To me, the point of living is not living, but actually accomplishing something and how can I do that when I can't bring myself to do anything other than playing video games, browsing memes on Reddit and watching educational videos on YouTube, reflecting on how very smart I must be getting by watching them.

So what do I do about it? I haven't been to any therapists nor taken any medication. If this continues, I might actually commit suicide to save myself from the shame and stress of failing an exam a second time because I've had enough of stress-induced mental breakdowns and stress is only going to get stronger if I fail again.",9.255241935483873,7.160837503893216,9.634871802002227,66.0157559788654,61.05784204671858,12.23805339265851,38.49279755283649,10.84659523809377,4.119994638487208,3712,144,663,73,40,1254,332,899,0.12,0.763,0.11699999999999999,-0.9163,7,1,3,0,0,4,83.0,0,4,2,16,52,41,5,7,54,0,78,5,0,15,9,147,125,75,4,21,39,3,0,0,0,9,2,1,2,1,45,38,0,5,16,17,2,9,30,21,1,5,19,7,79,20,115,86,20,83,0,4,5,3,20,32,1,25,37,503,124,39,0.10629324223490627,0.0,0.3630440500285909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05321866403561455,0.0550438712953788,0.0,0.04250133370628192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842457450548576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21867570397034114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04993300001963243,0.0,0.0,0.1295907477763867,0.2934813375313432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05802234540607061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0549146666016638,0.0,0.28082273608285113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477647561464545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904129775450833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666014959278555,0.0,0.15102224772706446,0.1337305928068789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056575566436932886,0.0,0.10494257074905997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05278658658141405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273982080090335,0.04723915878892748,0.11759772387888842,0.0,0.0,0.04332158959575328,0.0599517035243613,0.0,0.0,0.05434602088634246,0.037539030227570935,0.0,0.0,0.09385888027589452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05028861793287312,0.0709515645723527,0.0,0.1067858486077589,0.057892250862772165,0.0,0.05353962946771429,0.10711858773540113,0.1127603326294503,0.0,0.0,0.042421125927609465,0.0,0.11720664494978796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05652203449368234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03601352591455161,0.08084080047658357,0.0,0.0,0.11802606654472644,0.11510522313956376,0.0,0.0,0.04640557959902057,0.05552690738605008,0.0,0.10048147092412237,0.0,0.0,0.054069220231634345,0.05730104648523205,0.15256241640432247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056527973505313585,0.0,0.0,0.06809417276970238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053787217933547515,0.08470195222875605,0.09676537563567086,0.05544351667288133,0.0,0.0,0.04396343419038598,0.0,0.0,0.05417628731742731,0.0,0.12274459633559695,0.0,0.0,0.075234903942182,0.0,0.042442960276687286,0.0,0.30439637463176755,0.0,0.1216803319235691,0.11626755491366728,0.0,0.050090061438774015,0.0,0.0799192898034363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170732339282785,0.0,0.1362168353822362,0.0,0.0,0.061980444334784876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824920130875117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770305677266238,0.12538901646618425,0.08437062814289166,0.0,0.0,0.047785195037196894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03869137314670843,0.10794594708630892,0.0,0.18876917395392792,0.0,0.0,0.10267404455766188
mentalhealth,twdacc,2020/03/05,"I'm recovering from surgery and feel so bad mentally. I've been recovering from surgery and all is going well physically but I'm having such a hard time coping mentally. 

I'm having anxiety asking for help, or just facing other patients. I really feel like I'm going to break down at some point.

Has anyone else had surgery and felt super bad mentally?",4.11810945273632,6.473136358208954,5.8485820895522425,73.02023631840798,73.47761194029852,9.242786069651741,27.58457711442786,9.725611199111238,3.0892308457711453,284,11,48,8,6,97,47,67,0.16,0.66,0.179,0.358,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,1,0,6,1,1,0,1,11,16,6,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,3,4,1,3,6,13,2,7,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,2,26,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584334570139268,0.0,0.0,0.14481144218541825,0.21220180435606387,0.0,0.0,0.1936136278525827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34584520822663944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17300823155858938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20943530165699173,0.14795463832275094,0.1988516453570222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354031552545081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18552387684086893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388169758970779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118021079266762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6261342431040049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957795594370033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267567664436988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076359923848196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18621073807843236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InSideTheBoxDamnIt,2020/03/05,"Just venting because I cannot sleep Hello Reddit, I feel that therapy is not working for me. I am trying to be mindful and healthy. However, it is not getting easy and I read in a self-compassion book that it is supposed to be hard specially if it is working. My head is spinning because of what my brain keeps telling me. It does not stop telling me how bad I look and how terrible human being I am being when I fuck up. Today I have been having a horrible episode and it was stressing me during work, but I pulled through it. I am very dependable on emotions and love and I have been working to making that all independent and to love myself but that task is taking a lot of my energy and at the end of the day I am just exhausted mentally and physically somehow. I realize that you might see how scattered my ideas are and that's because that's my brain literally throwing a lot of dilemmas at me at once and I have to deal with them which put me in an unfavorable place. I'm seeing an old friend tomorrow and I hope that I won't be showing a bad side to him. Send me prayers a lot of them it is getting harder and harder to deal with this life. God have mercy on us all. Goodnight.",2.798264462809918,4.447275479338845,4.439743801652893,84.78325206611572,75.19834710743801,7.484628099173554,29.042148760330573,8.238735603445708,2.0575001652892566,934,41,190,16,20,314,130,242,0.086,0.787,0.127,0.9342,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,1,2,4,7,11,1,1,10,0,28,9,4,6,2,43,42,20,0,2,8,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,18,15,0,2,3,3,0,4,5,6,0,0,3,5,34,5,24,32,5,21,0,0,3,3,15,10,1,8,7,145,52,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999434820705936,0.21896369151185305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267322415970298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721763819746501,0.24687815884255085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047788274158174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346830880869236,0.1060475676434956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06054041300228509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250512943123594,0.11069088290446252,0.12511071005609867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725691453990199,0.0,0.12288021659913502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892151313272036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516356025436174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642385890271017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457069428636801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054524996548314,0.0,0.0,0.3053771894951886,0.2161267383273436,0.0,0.07992245724266027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206623250632691,0.12701739443751575,0.1208958197934951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563924923896744,0.12751133847914994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250951098295587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036435897396497,0.0,0.0,0.11976502682242432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19082280133426333,0.0,0.12490724108422985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198190949437217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010183616794792,0.13715331794562308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002403344700638,0.0,0.20930318418592855,0.0,0.13692469203076954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349252898048567,0.0,0.0,0.08129059324057986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440236061553273,0.0,0.0,0.09879195543060716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486671094136894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,peaceiseverystepp,2020/03/05,"Getting creative is a great way to ground yourself in the present moment - whether starting something new or returning to an old hobby, picking up a paintbrush, guitar or pencil can bring calmness to your life I had a talk to a friend of mine about how [being creative](https://anchor.fm/shaun-donaghy/episodes/Be-calm--be-happy--be-creative-Other-Voices---Dr-Lauri-Bower-eb8ot9) has made a difference to our lives. On a whim I bought a watercolour set for Christmas - I wouldn't say that I'm going to set the art world on fire, but I've noticed that while painting my mind goes very quiet.

Have you had a similar experience with creative activities?",11.243589743589745,9.117708572649576,9.672752136752138,67.39169230769231,57.2905982905983,11.753162393162393,43.91282051282053,9.888512548439397,4.507992820512821,521,24,84,7,5,160,91,117,0.018000000000000002,0.8540000000000001,0.128,0.8625,1,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,1,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,11,0,8,1,0,3,0,10,15,6,0,1,4,0,1,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,1,2,1,0,0,0,4,3,8,3,14,9,0,18,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,7,49,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27284231420271354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25545120348588685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20176099308780626,0.0,0.13643816976442988,0.0,0.1484154674038255,0.0,0.0,0.2879147312471573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844553633971916,0.0,0.0,0.23059697819029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24710295495960305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636833309857912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25221673573284137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973168074288827,0.2740291252292537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20767402919288336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20104318966925333,0.0,0.0,0.18484070396437047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20989951378675947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21547305710849685,0.0,0.20728578734988573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,br1ti5hb45tard,2020/03/05,"Quick question I've had this problem for several years now and would like to know if anyone else experiences it/understands what it is.
I've been suffering from a voice in my head for as long as I can remember that will repeat whatever I hear, say or think in a voice I cannot describe but gives me an extremely intense feeling of vertigo. I can't think of anything that could cause it and it happens on and off rather than being there permanently. I'm almost 15 and have had about a years break from it but it returned recently and I'm in a much better state of mind to ask about it openly, if you need more information I'm happy to provide whatever I can.",4.5864076858813725,5.451196796992488,5.788370927318297,79.88367585630745,69.75187969924811,9.520133667502087,30.567251461988306,9.725611199111238,2.8080248955722644,526,21,105,12,9,176,88,133,0.032,0.85,0.11800000000000001,0.8999,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,6,5,0,0,5,0,13,2,1,1,0,26,25,12,0,7,6,0,1,1,0,2,1,4,0,0,10,6,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,5,8,3,20,18,2,16,0,1,0,0,7,6,0,5,9,72,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18824160471943469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13144472691623413,0.19261467052445128,0.1546971017573148,0.0,0.17574226218780625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16625902960525202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19311420556419254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009214655550202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15703883207213362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18388714187737745,0.0,0.0,0.09505176392647803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18033404813483997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662360879971142,0.20011542204201546,0.0,0.0,0.1929286696305592,0.0,0.21187476260405735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103312617560887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09184084473062724,0.0,0.0,0.16636238397946118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898130579696506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819191273675574,0.13938981479358836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798779595106299,0.0,0.0,0.21058821548231904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18561426555082,0.0,0.21295237498371736,0.0,0.0,0.1494946320444648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123715521693306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409086750561373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957008668410653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354041432858815,0.0,0.0,0.24211464481251416
mentalhealth,ImNotARobot_exe,2020/03/05,"How to get tested for depression in secret For quite a while, I've suspected I may be depressed or bipolar. However, I really, REALLY, want to avoid my family/friends finding out, no matter if it's true or not. How would you reccomend getting tested in secret, and where would one actually go to find out?",7.807528735632182,7.100614120689657,8.836206896551728,66.14614942528738,62.96551724137932,12.560919540229886,36.574712643678154,11.855464076750405,4.617533333333332,241,10,41,7,3,83,45,58,0.223,0.677,0.1,-0.8395,1,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,3,4,0,1,1,0,4,1,0,2,1,21,8,7,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,5,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,0,0,4,1,9,4,0,7,0,2,0,0,3,5,0,4,1,30,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.2530526620992636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4466928384686558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.474015855589803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003450400953874,0.0,0.2709613010290837,0.0,0.1473738918149294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757176029321588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27581192762224865,0.0,0.0,0.3322458578793493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15294987680278907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3684178753657134,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kode4656,2020/03/05,"A friend distancing herself from the world I have this good friend who has been distancing herself from the world from almost 6 months I think, and I’m really trying to help her get back into the world coz I’ve been in the same spot a year ago. And no matter what I do she always make some kind of excuse. There was this one time where I texted saying I would kidnap her sometime that week and she was actually pretty excited about it but then when the day came where I texted her to get ready she all of a sudden got sick and couldn’t come, she’s also stopped working and talking to any of her friend from school. And at this point I really don’t know what to do anymore",4.462318840579711,5.022057695652175,4.755217391304349,88.2803623188406,69.8695652173913,7.872463768115942,23.30434782608696,7.793537801064563,0.8388782608695662,534,11,115,6,9,168,87,138,0.06,0.7829999999999999,0.156,0.8546,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,8,0,11,1,0,2,1,22,20,10,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,8,9,0,1,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,6,1,17,6,15,12,3,22,0,0,0,0,18,9,0,2,11,78,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.17636715842588033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16020692078410734,0.0,0.18097575722038764,0.0,0.0,0.14453032953295056,0.15038247666175678,0.0,0.0,0.12290311947262965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17923635762777793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13897080442013818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20670785087916627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556835532694537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165563936020749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4188964281175846,0.0,0.18884873334046676,0.0,0.0,0.15158839312814504,0.1445469048990006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114002386398535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882032828288262,0.09932490334094296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063919075326407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14425757440571735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246784545738305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708489927043451,0.0,0.0,0.18386816450686447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315615151677957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14372436037694386,0.0,0.1829091855403876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874735040475673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109901428019576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452645450164325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158049782730722,0.0,0.0,0.10538556397091496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227043277037998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14497132023626727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13157415128715325,0.0,0.0,0.12838595186574822,0.0,0.0,0.11638468882688545
mentalhealth,sspooks,2020/03/05,"Doctors won’t call back I’ve been trying for a long time to get a new psychiatrist to see for meds. My last doctor retired and so I’m on my last prescription. Some doctors say they’re taking new patients and still don’t call back?

I called one place and everything was good- they have multiple doctors. The scheduler called after I gave her all my info but I didn’t catch it. I tried to call for a week after and she never picks up so I texted and finally got her. She said she’d set me up with someone and they’d call me to make the appointment.

A week goes by and nothing. I text her again yesterday (after calling a bunch) and she says sorry and that she will check right away and still nothing? 

I’m worried.. they know it’s time sensitive because I’m running out but they’re just like not... lol I’m scared. I’m doing horribly and I’m actually reaching out for help and getting none",0.7195437171524119,3.1718762912087928,2.3433397037744896,92.3560081223125,88.28571428571428,5.363019589106546,21.649307214524608,6.895973343053719,0.6516872431915908,703,25,147,10,23,229,106,182,0.057,0.856,0.087,0.6261,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,3,0,8,3,0,1,7,1,10,4,0,2,2,26,25,16,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,2,4,3,0,0,3,15,0,0,2,0,1,2,6,1,0,1,6,4,22,2,19,15,4,32,0,0,1,0,23,8,0,1,22,88,25,4,0.0,0.0,0.09294509305557183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894855357938569,0.14647459837899174,0.0,0.058060288256949685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6807884509975032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3899479665196606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559979961444071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433591901575988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952285476739224,0.0,0.0,0.07988673986240598,0.07617589151315057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06384051821940617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052343999110465576,0.15527429374935825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04653175196196322,0.0,0.0,0.08428856692072262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357658030433871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579539608887792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345858829553904,0.1839758595676308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18277972679534485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0645402771918875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09951044512572706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813384578275597,0.09059952545764503,0.15148482482583728,0.09535656547248662,0.0,0.0758976986661706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070052963023606,0.0,0.0,0.10661864966596377,0.0,0.0,0.15212508920126785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161216495617306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107590707265452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932980560033225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15279911486935566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672562141265056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TimIsColdInMaine,2020/03/05,"Is there a name for this symptom? Similar to Deja Vu I recently I've had been experiencing something odd that I'd like to identify,  If it's an actual potential issue. 

Background:   pretty intense ADHD, take adderall for it,  take Ambien for sleep.  Pretty strong anxiety but no medication for it.

Usually when I'm working from home,  I've got some shows playing next to my work monitors.  Twice in the last week,  I've experienced this bizarre thing where I'm working while a show is on,  so only half paying attention to whatever is going on in the show.   On two separate occasions,  I've had it happen where the episodes are ""out of order"", and I distinctly remember an episode being played previously, as if I dropped a stack of pages and picked up with a few pages out of order.   Normally I'd chalk this up to a software glitch,  but once was on Netflix,  once was Kodi.  I wasnt fully watching,  so I can't be 100 percent certain,  but it's much stronger than a feeling.   Like,  I'm worried if my brain/ memory is placing things out of order.   I struggle with organization and short termed memory things to begin with,  so this was extremely concerning.   Maybe I'm being overly cautious,  but if it's the beginning of something,  I at least want to know to look out for something",7.4183534647171,7.0038892396694274,8.199752066115707,69.43046726001272,63.628099173553714,11.743674507310873,38.036872218690405,11.20814326018867,4.430178258105531,1004,47,178,26,13,339,142,242,0.07,0.8170000000000001,0.113,0.8158,0,0,3,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,4,7,7,0,1,12,0,16,4,2,1,2,29,31,17,0,6,8,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,14,10,0,0,4,6,1,1,3,1,0,3,8,5,9,6,38,20,8,33,0,0,2,0,1,18,0,5,12,116,23,5,0.0,0.0,0.1347794344080391,0.0,0.16598630364454553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565690533446936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15418100810690902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983463675517622,0.09866873771294664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784934235449228,0.0,0.1104624594601458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221338388823536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853969933045293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441552329589737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590389511520887,0.11258142200757988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495114169607267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598105563853488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875417313549065,0.0,0.0,0.13913542128715126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101529752103696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468859078680719,0.0,0.13532248959034562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29417400917042485,0.0,0.10504199359731008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14429983413668435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810233769037467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637100750015113,0.0,0.1564563469294789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13821384025597816,0.0,0.0,0.3189809360218515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14438684082792996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143553428590898,0.20768922322251848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27527060486110577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491740293875215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521131640298118,0.0,0.08146327217918314,0.0,0.1107867968233003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016461202551991,0.14026156861200376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fisherguy23,2020/03/05,"Should i tell my psychologist about homicidal thoughts? Ive had them since i was around 14. Usually when I’m angry annoyed or in a certain headspace. I enjoy having these thoughts when I’m in that headspace but I’m completely different in a normal headspace and wouldn’t hurt anyone. I wouldn’t act on these thoughts but they’ve been increasing more and more and I’m afraid it will get to the point where I’m homicidal. Im afraid to tell my psychologist because I’m always seen by adults as nice,probably don’t seem that nice from this post but I actually am i just have problems which I’m working on, and I don’t like telling her things like that because her opinion of me will change. Will telling her about this be important and help with getting a correct diagnosis or is it ok left unsaid.",3.9284615384615407,5.86791831847134,4.2270063694267535,86.2673689367957,72.82165605095541,7.888094071533562,30.548260656540908,8.617729084823388,2.332159627633513,644,29,129,12,13,201,93,157,0.078,0.777,0.145,0.8519,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,7,11,1,2,4,1,17,0,0,0,2,25,31,13,0,5,6,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,1,11,7,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,7,1,15,6,15,17,3,15,0,1,1,0,10,9,0,4,5,77,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.1562800868515596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13325489123605058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197830274998664,0.0,0.0,0.14256452436501618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195247895141652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941398376013456,0.0,0.16791077779884533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16731922574533062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673400916115477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073429635065525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714403645554651,0.0,0.17298592737423302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17399986825443858,0.0,0.0,0.15647918569779526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15690977276342594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151390404294332,0.0,0.15337627888517574,0.0,0.0,0.1532387725295921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579154947123968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324750128563651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5599011307754082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639435762663857,0.0,0.0,0.381415795906901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17637897495455432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658871171992075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayidk_ok,2020/03/05,"Is it selfish to leave behind a toxic life with a parent that has a mental illness? I don’t want to get too in detail but my mom has several diagnosed illnesses, and it’s been taking a toll on our family before I was even born. Although, I’m not too sure on the background of why my family is so toxic. It’s complicated. Anyway, I really want to leave. I’m 20, a full time student and working, but I’m afraid of looking at the one that chickens out because everyone else stays. I have siblings and we’re all pretty much adults. Im not sure why they’re still sticking around though when they could leave and live their life and out their happiness in front of them for once. I’m afraid I’m the only one that looks at it in that way. I have trouble wanting to live so how am I going to get through a life I don’t want to live? Maybe it’s selfish of me to look at it in that way, I don’t know :(",3.103954893274268,3.642240539267018,4.720104712041884,87.39037051953285,72.92670157068063,7.761739830849779,25.68707209021345,7.882392219407189,1.2485695529601286,697,21,156,9,13,236,104,191,0.151,0.779,0.07,-0.9252,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,4,1,11,8,0,2,9,0,13,6,0,1,3,23,30,13,0,5,4,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,11,9,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,5,0,2,2,3,16,3,27,27,3,22,0,0,3,0,8,13,0,0,4,101,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10518217029973842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202562295537727,0.0,0.10054040908721908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433640871141287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992389151176752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987025622985646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803964732614345,0.0,0.0,0.11290127499323055,0.0,0.0,0.2227702790207649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346124740538035,0.0,0.06714967949059189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257772020485533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762666837051942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649343855687062,0.0,0.0,0.3753242925303056,0.0,0.0,0.2503671365749338,0.0,0.0,0.31299661917672583,0.0,0.29765897681800946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187016419114129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907151002871727,0.0,0.0,0.13838061598297507,0.0,0.0,0.08685683468272448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583022588479134,0.16012850814263752,0.08986149265199711,0.0,0.0,0.13119610950197355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202051639246598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569252122584905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334804651935248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12593651518509222,0.09435799102799096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227176208737461,0.0,0.08883715439587421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608577153670048,0.0,0.06889658699966854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787613213968844,0.1875703985168468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132313366767795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601756843626825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xuxii,2020/03/05,"study abroad Hi anyone here who had been or currently studying abroad specifically Malaysia. If there is, can we talk at private, i need to ask some question about my application.",4.475645161290323,7.884011322580644,3.800241935483872,81.62036290322581,80.93548387096773,6.970967741935485,30.330645161290327,8.07648339933343,2.69047741935484,145,7,24,3,4,43,30,31,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,6,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,3,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,4,1,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580521398117545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4787175150190893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3796943599465492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5736370179431722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4115834917246039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ambrrres,2020/03/05,"Why do I do this? So I'm not sure if this is triggering but here's a pre-warning for selfharm (I guess?) just in case.


When I get really sad or angry (when I get into a state of sadness where I'm like sobbing I then get extremely angry at myself and vice cersa so one doesn't really come without the other) why is it I start punching/ thumping myself in the head or hit my head off of walls? I really struggle to restrain myself when I feel the urge to do it, like sometimes I will be a sobbing mess and be walking around my house and just headbutt a wall. I just really want to know if the only person who does this and if anyone has an idea as to why?",0.7478108941418284,2.7081340431654692,3.1382579650565248,90.24670863309356,82.66906474820144,5.6980472764645445,20.71993833504625,6.868970318607317,0.4557046248715313,508,15,109,6,14,175,83,139,0.225,0.7190000000000001,0.055,-0.9813,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,11,9,0,1,9,0,10,2,2,1,1,26,22,17,0,4,11,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,1,3,0,0,2,3,6,0,1,0,1,15,3,15,18,0,17,0,4,0,0,2,9,2,6,7,79,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11781617520617706,0.0,0.0,0.1499969777026831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14514420482290005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14745180269871375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851965349629786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640962901046405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856171108264468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3458505864289839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19442152082369749,0.0,0.1902112393335795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260088051549624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463706544519455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11417710909077355,0.12814864221987776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471240260359249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43177087471076014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664664631462475,0.0,0.11926218853468985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17614838573466168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15880528951339298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938318345871527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4561237322144287,0.0,0.0,0.16242393031214614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rofloflsauris,2020/03/05,How to not hate myself? Does anyone have any advice on how to stop thinking you’re a fat ugly piece of shit. I know it’s my mental illness and I can’t figure out how to be... better at all,-0.9692857142857144,0.9763863571428572,2.0145714285714327,95.58042857142858,90.1904761904762,3.3600000000000003,13.16190476190476,3.1291,-1.4221866666666667,145,2,33,0,5,51,37,42,0.247,0.629,0.124,-0.7097,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,2,0,1,0,3,3,2,3,1,11,6,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,7,5,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,23,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3474514881002415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417946428094614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486175158822905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144660718097841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3111550755672284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.351044283902056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954078108713584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583232967876412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.364979721284695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972661096277374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278300459520128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fifth-ninja-turtle,2020/03/05,"Struggling with bipolar diagnosis (24, F) Growing up my family treated mental illnesses as a very taboo thing. When I was 16 I told my mom I was depressed, and she told me that she was going to put me in a crazy house if that was the case. So I didn’t talk about it, and eventually three years later it started to subside. I got diagnosed with severe anxiety at 20, and started taking medication and therapy for it against my moms wishes. Now at 24, I am having an incredibly hard time. I go from happy to sad, to incredibly angry; with really no warning. I know that I am being irrational, but I cannot stop myself. I thought that I was just stressed and that maybe my depression was coming back, since I’m sleeping all the time now and have no motivation. But, I went to the doctors this week and after an evaluation they diagnosed me with Bipolar 2. I don’t know why, but I am taking this diagnosis much harder than my previous ones. I think I am worried that people will not want to be around me if they know I am bipolar. Has anyone else ever experienced this feeling around a diagnosis?",5.1719315895372215,5.9671306901408485,6.74169349429913,73.82630281690143,68.38967136150234,9.841582830315225,32.11569416498995,9.957137785484203,3.2215046277665977,859,36,160,20,14,296,127,213,0.175,0.768,0.057999999999999996,-0.9644,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,1,10,7,0,2,8,0,20,9,1,1,2,34,40,15,0,4,7,2,2,0,0,1,8,0,0,0,13,14,0,2,7,0,0,6,6,5,0,2,12,3,32,2,23,25,2,26,0,3,0,0,9,6,0,2,14,122,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742096671142718,0.0,0.0,0.08904476967474921,0.13048320290366236,0.0,0.2267336604344908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792284704615588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969913312380336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193695061348566,0.25851133151679634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303462016760885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10638301710471826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519366947062387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005247813021333,0.0,0.06439103815404967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474974783765815,0.0,0.1018519286729333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13556444660919847,0.11407890587340055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14694263764092153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20996159642981735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12793830785894014,0.0,0.0,0.1282898377790542,0.12833695694497566,0.0,0.0,0.2982971686702073,0.0,0.0,0.09361552440516877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629438498851896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828715493674047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280200389579069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158246952000202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438671325357782,0.0,0.10534368460461307,0.0,0.12744009383969138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18027531602335004,0.0,0.0,0.10646873439296613,0.1458768464043643,0.1331319100189179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914998819796236,0.10235759864977978,0.0,0.0,0.1456336789187744,0.0,0.08460443529590878,0.08159953611791995,0.0,0.10110018596689023,0.14851543105986903,0.0,0.0,0.2433731807775777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507553972592314,0.07511322333404581,0.0,0.10215098399126883,0.0,0.0,0.11805298730147536,0.11491187467013535,0.0,0.1464440584076367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932820210270454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200801693609581
mentalhealth,Alec122,2020/03/05,"Developing a weepy problem... I've been taking medication for anxiety for a long time. I just started taking a new one. My mom broke her leg a few weeks ago with me walking with her, and went to the hospital. I cried the next morning. Ever since then, I've developed a weepy problem. I feel like crying every night, even though I don't quite cry. I'm also in a new country, and feel a overwhelming sadness since my 33rd birthday, which is also due to lack of progress. I am also a virgin. Does any of this have to do with my new habit? ",2.0686111111111103,4.053504935185188,3.809037037037037,86.9896666666667,78.35185185185185,6.542222222222222,24.68888888888889,7.554174236665415,1.2335377777777785,415,15,85,6,10,139,72,108,0.207,0.72,0.07400000000000001,-0.9123,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,7,6,0,1,10,0,6,3,1,0,1,12,13,7,0,3,1,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,5,0,1,2,2,11,1,11,11,2,16,0,3,0,1,3,1,0,0,14,53,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12525246183881206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33898871838574096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608772334099812,0.0,0.10809285101528973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4656288079153062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365113829594444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332622757223462,0.12781244707698164,0.11904995404035533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288938262176198,0.10094356948757592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903123656479987,0.0,0.0,0.12504459336860266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423432223055575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16548691980680874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40940048080739705,0.1502723982419091,0.13259892968174822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957474188041075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704068764217469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150288188004769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337669105480651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001169940330998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21247754883796488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882491148448822,0.0,0.08239220418833583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334101340156688,0.0,0.0,0.13098498607683676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,desquian,2020/03/05,"Looking for advice on how to continue living and moving past issues( i want to live my own life and not be a reflection of my past anymore)[21 M] I have a lot of adversity to the mislabeling of ""mental health issues"". I mean my dad has a pretty severe case of bipolar disorder and nobody ever acknowledged it until few years ago when he had to be hospitalized. Everyone thought my dad just had a very loud personality accompanied by anger issues; but recently its gotten to the point where its just pitiful- like waking everyone up at 3am in tears saying ""I need to tell you all something"" and he gives a few hours worth of pretense to what he's about to say but never quite gets to the point and blames it on us for not being receptive enough. And it's such a hard place for him and I love him and feel sorry for him but also like, im 21 and my sibilings 24 and this is supposed to be the prime of our lives but every time i come home im on egg shells. I feel bad that my sibiling still lives with him but hes afraid to move out bc of what my mom would end up like living alone w my dad.

Im so pissed off! I wish I could leave my two parents together and rest assured that no violoence will take place but thats never been the case. On any given day, ill hear a terrified yelp in my moms voice screaming my name and have to run down to see their room in pieces with my dad standing over my mom. We moved houses 13 times growing up. Not like my parents travel for work but more like they split up 6 times and got back together 7 times.

Growing up, he would go on for 4-5 hour 'lectures' *as we called it* when we got in trouble. Now looking back I realize that isn't a normal way to raise your kids, that's a textbook symptom of BPD. He would remind me as a kid that i am not my own person but a propogation of himself. 

Most of all, I hate who this turned me into. I've always been a *weird* kid with terrible social skills. I remember my dad asking me in 4th grade, ""what happened to your spark you used to be such an expressive kid?"" IDK dad I lost that shit! IDK who i am or why my life is the way it is. Even as a kid i would fantasize about sitting infront of a therapist and telling them everything thats been going on at home and for that imaginary therapist to just say

""its not your fault, none of what youre gooing through defines you""

What do i do now? as an adult i still have anxiety. On one hand i feel very smart and aware about some life issues most people never have to confront in their whole lives. But on the other hand, i wish i couldve had a better childhood and i hate the way I handle myself in relationships and see a reflection of my dad in that. 

If I ever raise children myself, Im going to make sure they never question their own identities. They deserve to have a childlike naivity and not deal with strange stressful living situations.",3.2733741855414245,4.5036758208191205,4.484978281104564,86.62864955010859,73.21501706484642,7.579832454235183,25.2635743096494,8.07648339933343,1.3457761092150171,2245,70,474,33,44,739,283,586,0.14400000000000002,0.745,0.111,-0.9743,2,1,1,0,0,0,52.0,5,7,7,5,23,27,6,2,27,0,32,14,5,3,10,88,66,40,0,11,20,12,6,5,0,5,7,7,3,9,28,29,1,0,11,1,1,11,13,17,0,2,12,17,72,10,82,43,17,80,0,2,4,1,69,34,2,7,35,320,100,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059082919116587765,0.05359605324899309,0.0,0.0,0.06262055922205735,0.0,0.04835156433835517,0.0503093573450575,0.0,0.0,0.04111633944078568,0.0,0.04625338387605054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05652395410341327,0.0,0.0,0.09298333177246866,0.050483374784889165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05347386360966816,0.0,0.0,0.0761499689503978,0.0,0.06173862138800621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05208279374064236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04827411174507242,0.0,0.0,0.03899308873444815,0.06233382798970924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929486901386148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053551524130026666,0.06247356973922955,0.0,0.03993468383021583,0.10938296331831987,0.05094197417251803,0.1155483622841155,0.054339487223662906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171444833037147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031588981045832,0.05800080944197419,0.10308610988015472,0.0,0.0967142190115984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05346648490411779,0.0,0.05416221583134127,0.11938772313527606,0.0,0.0642684445293727,0.06814524410926963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129694457582316,0.0,0.11908608904501836,0.06976521026215311,0.0,0.0,0.26123801551179404,0.2524271293650185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402069319695668,0.0,0.0,0.12811862666179666,0.14769377689087432,0.0,0.373724340490588,0.0,0.10154596657580918,0.0,0.06600158561802183,0.0514027629154345,0.054569456423504234,0.0,0.040358958650984746,0.0,0.0,0.06586101301262913,0.0,0.0,0.0609316324343541,0.0,0.0,0.21243763920724448,0.0,0.19278510985200414,0.0,0.04483192258818401,0.18652856843745955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059240075584942785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040970721703518884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342721381304992,0.0,0.11543593874561076,0.04191684610058808,0.1055864450347384,0.1263401686893256,0.0,0.11431256110163347,0.0,0.0,0.06151174922701664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06773145217581139,0.06430894537916636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05969908487761157,0.06491372825342505,0.06849183639692369,0.0,0.0,0.14424579976143526,0.0,0.0,0.09636102059939948,0.0,0.0,0.06830502645323737,0.062063534307376565,0.0,0.06796199665053833,0.0,0.06163355390079499,0.0,0.04654672163090921,0.0,0.06768243357371652,0.0,0.0,0.09657031182648156,0.0,0.06925919545999831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056984866524578515,0.06284333066843899,0.04546001673160847,0.0,0.1056931787073538,0.0,0.0,0.14040244655828324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04800019820495339,0.14102387763564425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0657654636230059,0.059062740953193874,0.0,0.07272852920350338,0.05221989005129885,0.0,0.09977522167938507,0.035662146151025816,0.14397613554120658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05455769153654825,0.06750383798715652,0.13905699108815495,0.0,0.0,0.04401716969568576,0.0,0.0,0.17180232361851633,0.0,0.0,0.03893564615812798
mentalhealth,waking_dream96,2020/03/05,"has anyone had success treating chronic depression/dysthymia ive been medicated for 6-7 years, 3 different med combos (first zoloft, then zoloft + welbutrin, then cymbalta) and seen a therapist for probably about 60% of that time. It just keeps coming back. It doesn't matter what i do, as SOON as the world changes slightly for the worse around my my brain goes absolutely haywire and I get so depressed. honestly it doesn't even have to change for the worse it just has to change. 

Anyways. I recently moved and so of course I'm depressed now. Going to see a psych later this month. but (and i know some of this is the depression talking) I am feeling more and more hopeless as the years go by and the depression keeps coming back. I feel like I'll never not be depressed. I'll just have a few brief moments of normalcy while my meds work and then as soon as something slightly stressful shows up, my meds wont work anymore and I'll be depressed again. 

has anyone found something that works? for the record I know I'll hear exercise and sleep so-- I have a great sleep schedule, mostly because I have a sleep disorder. I am medicated for said sleep disorder, and to my knowledge my sleep is now pretty good because I have very few symptoms. But, I get 8 hours every single night except once in a blue moon. As for exercise, I have struggled to find any motivation to do so but right now I'm running like 4 times a week. It does not make me feel better and never has, even when consistently working out. I do it because I know I should but it has never made me feel less depressed.",3.2756933457422046,5.498901091205212,3.983791298278273,86.02937703583065,75.54723127035831,6.861284318287575,27.576663564448577,7.83500028581142,1.75405919032108,1253,51,240,19,28,398,158,307,0.171,0.7290000000000001,0.1,-0.9785,1,0,2,0,0,1,37.0,0,0,0,8,21,18,0,2,14,0,27,14,6,3,3,47,51,30,0,1,10,0,4,2,0,2,8,2,0,0,12,15,0,2,11,3,0,7,8,10,0,1,6,9,25,8,30,41,8,42,0,8,3,0,3,6,0,2,31,159,37,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05176625189978208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549356337228905,0.10645394624398287,0.0,0.0,0.06776561101723892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170677798773092,0.0,0.1392116268724838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732460942101262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497844590068378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415841284955871,0.1311464520962699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4589524120637355,0.0,0.0,0.07953233539736068,0.17448711113497958,0.0,0.06661575225387333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005570501075523,0.0,0.06413691255479065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15396030871399435,0.054382288018342925,0.0,0.0,0.06957504497312124,0.06475018682740581,0.0,0.08346494285734267,0.0,0.0,0.07954225363038464,0.0,0.08652491286924954,0.06384836265691614,0.0,0.08392587871973904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579615598837426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496582340631759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532324408306712,0.0,0.0,0.1255056337462729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437970755712896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202942530726636,0.05081269510746706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536664843958746,0.15337183244411806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607606541410933,0.08090670436504943,0.0,0.0,0.17613225651104,0.0,0.0,0.07143628089914496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106851301148027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744446000276338,0.08207347144329072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516228117562837,0.0,0.0,0.06500862799349566,0.07241040713299185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060660177115870274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.380889886865128,0.0,0.0,0.1172064123327336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719864188595691,0.07958029002871116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912094631597268,0.0,0.06118478572142772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838467279351386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08877586955527024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280944910295437,0.0,0.0,0.06106128073718955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216738090377806,0.0,0.1551516853279643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980414353181982
mentalhealth,MyLifesParody,2020/03/05,"Adjustment disorder I was just given this diagnosis, and was wondering if anyone else has had it or gone through it?",4.902857142857143,7.700692857142862,6.48595238095238,67.2632142857143,72.80952380952381,11.81904761904762,34.3095238095238,11.20814326018867,5.31869523809524,94,5,15,4,2,32,19,21,0.124,0.8759999999999999,0.0,-0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,7,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3216336510693083,0.4713111068332999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5271850278829074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842601685437577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4988363502414567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DarkestWhispers,2020/03/05,"My father is Mentally Ill, and I fear he's on his way to a breakdown. I dont know how to explain this. 
My father is bipolar Schizophrenic, and despite being medicated I have noticed a steep decline in his stability. He isnt well. I live a ways away, and cant force him to the doctor, but I fear he needs some inpatient help. How do I get him help, even if he isnt going to be willing? He severely paranoid, and I doubt he even recognizes that something isnt right. But I can see it from 250 miles away.",2.6267857142857167,3.7843736190476207,4.7001785714285695,84.74169642857143,74.71428571428571,7.916666666666668,28.36309523809524,8.472884824447931,1.969880952380952,390,16,84,7,8,135,66,105,0.184,0.748,0.067,-0.8849,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,3,4,0,13,5,0,2,0,14,19,9,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,3,1,0,0,1,14,1,9,16,1,9,0,0,1,0,15,6,0,3,0,56,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36382164597726496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19817659603599547,0.0,0.0,0.2269192762275335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557662017837189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4357489687961316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115760193144707,0.0,0.11003777607122296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25955661116151474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064075872399784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17096855936020702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19505012827486906,0.19512176761525865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14356556080163113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22043578644706027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16534902174719188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542887652716512,0.0,0.0,0.21873363581587346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905687306348425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3073704843591787,0.0,0.0,0.1740861585018138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zekromroar,2020/03/05,"How do I help my girlfriend with bipolar disorder? Throwaway acct cause she follows my main one - 

Title pretty much says it all. My girlfriend was pretty recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder and I’m trying to figure out how to help her with it. She feels really hopeless cause when she takes her meds she feels blank, but when she doesn’t she risks having episodes in the middle of the day. I want to know what the best way for me to talk to her during episodes, support her, ect. without coming off as condescending or invalidating her feelings. Any advice is helpful.",3.932155844155844,6.802924847619053,4.315584415584418,81.12350649350651,76.71428571428571,6.4848484848484835,27.640692640692638,7.686295010490155,1.9910952380952387,459,19,76,7,11,144,73,105,0.071,0.742,0.187,0.9313,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,3,0,5,3,0,4,1,20,15,8,0,1,3,0,3,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,3,6,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,2,0,1,1,4,17,2,15,14,4,11,0,1,0,0,18,4,0,1,4,55,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16737268730439972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647617157751605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17974763566589616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3519031747387931,0.0,0.147542424799466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046133375544738,0.0,0.0,0.17384544254821707,0.0,0.0,0.3926030946565121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598127159459371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3444158195096472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413092631905297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19025330130242352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259103976147565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606365925805134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485063677576363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972625791422752,0.0,0.16911818872493742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13620861155490635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19436634425755805,0.0,0.0,0.12878113131576965,0.1376682556314758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628777518632775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010252933603557,0.13595397267402295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16510766346444275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ferdinandfoldvik,2020/03/05,"Talked to my psychiatrist today We cleared up a lot. Things are alot more clear now. Honestly this day in general has been really good, idk why...",1.8316666666666641,4.641932814814819,3.212870370370372,84.05041666666669,91.22222222222223,8.625925925925927,21.564814814814817,8.841846274778883,2.377303703703704,114,4,22,4,4,37,27,27,0.05,0.628,0.322,0.8431,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,2,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,3,2,3,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,3,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28690732705663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3731397252534028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3782164940004898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28499807394861304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3575733688968583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955549304735419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42168912298792943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4014301497306792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vEagle1313,2020/03/05,"what's the point of asking for help if there was something to help me break this vicious cycle of apathy,i would take it.

why does the usual advice here help others but not me?

why are my attempts to heal never enough?

WHY",2.6163333333333334,4.565966133333337,3.4819444444444483,90.13625000000003,76.55555555555556,5.388888888888888,17.916666666666668,5.985473137389443,-0.2426666666666661,176,3,35,1,4,56,37,45,0.040999999999999995,0.8320000000000001,0.126,0.4538,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,1,5,5,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,5,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,2,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221871211100368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21226165430923966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986935034689221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346039563897344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4565616781772401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511541407750933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21463619904727727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17479463871144565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17071378868369425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250064150053385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6146335325190014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16129022643532434,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ladymedallion,2020/03/05,"I’m constantly going through intense highs and lows and I don’t know why. It’s exhausting. What’s wrong with me? I’m a 26 year old female but this has been an issue for quite some time now. I’ve been able to recognize it since at least age 18. One week I’ll feel intense amounts of motivation and confidence. It’ll be borderline overwhelming. I don’t want to sleep because all I want to do is grind and be my best self. I’ll come up with all these amazing ideas for my future and how to work towards them. I’ll suddenly be going to yoga and to the gym often. There’s been a few times where I’ve splurged money into something that I actually cannot afford, but I do it because I’m not thinking clearly. Then suddenly, I’ll wake up and I’ll be wildly depressed. Often suicidal. Looking into my journal, there is numerous entry’s where I even go as far as writing suicide notes and how I could kill myself. I feel guilty and sad and worthless. And it seems like absolutely nothing can get me out of that funk. It’s such a horrible feeling. Then suddenly, after a few days to a week or two, I’ll get a wave of motivation and I’m on top of the world again. I feel so good that I don’t even care about how wildly depressed I just was. I think “I’m okay now. I don’t need help. Because that feeling was temporary and I’m good now.” And the same cycle will continue. Sometimes I do feel fairly neutral in between these bouts of extreme emotions, it’s not always such extremes but very often it is. I’m so sick of it. I just want to stay motivated and happy but it always disappears. 

What the fuck is wrong with me?",1.7321084337349395,3.786479906626511,3.597213855421689,87.75136295180725,79.75301204819277,6.559638554216868,25.134036144578317,7.645422480735847,1.3492180722891565,1267,49,263,20,32,426,168,332,0.184,0.6409999999999999,0.175,-0.893,1,0,1,0,0,2,33.0,0,0,1,7,23,19,2,1,11,1,26,5,2,6,3,62,56,29,3,5,9,0,6,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,19,22,0,0,14,2,1,5,7,11,0,2,5,7,23,8,34,44,9,43,0,6,1,1,4,16,1,6,22,168,42,4,0.11494106485856764,0.0,0.11216589885402303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19128034739811164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21020101888016907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062355626889815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719007604371713,0.0,0.0,0.09901154979823047,0.0,0.12421045755073402,0.0,0.09177108744999572,0.0,0.0,0.07412747799672884,0.0,0.19799714147578415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292932273215095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151834978608167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487059359104116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626116232610183,0.12010392474219753,0.0,0.19597096793100927,0.1928142237229621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235690086236155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704257292103556,0.12144154572544337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297544715508232,0.0,0.11996860908617918,0.0,0.0,0.1271652583304527,0.0,0.06316860327773473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05615439839245146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652154583428624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522734317968339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028905170945758,0.0,0.12061131240080893,0.0,0.07788704024630476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225397085241844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463802856274884,0.11990859836227573,0.0,0.0,0.09508043661919784,0.0,0.11502407392097985,0.0,0.0,0.08848724724047988,0.11367965218054164,0.0,0.0,0.122511881743921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514537385310889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14729918648917434,0.0,0.0,0.13404611850117834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228071877687676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483841611043424,0.20338565422165755,0.0,0.1843975781827781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371643309587217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367846415851267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25134002134438754,0.0,0.07401827727807718
mentalhealth,Randommlbbfan,2020/03/05,"if you feel like killing yourself but do not want to at the same time, is that a mental health issue? Also being in the middle of finding something funny/interesting then suddenly question my existence while still pretending to be happy",7.213571428571428,9.10513416666667,7.289047619047621,67.73928571428571,64.47619047619048,9.40952380952381,35.42857142857143,9.725611199111238,3.985800000000001,193,9,27,4,3,62,40,42,0.085,0.738,0.177,0.6561,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,8,6,5,1,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,5,4,1,8,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,6,23,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23847828788558484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15078384682063534,0.21304115729064269,0.0,0.0,0.27255837589295145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174499020025509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169830971585865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31125357809307685,0.0,0.0,0.3299249859273703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456902564633318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3005253621027486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33406325052608105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295764911254526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381507500336213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388854605711565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17589188008289058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PassTheLamp02,2020/03/05,"A giant shituation So 3 days ago now I had decided to try and get some help for my mental health. I explained to my school's counselor what was going on and they'd told my family about it and told them that I needed to go see someone. My family blew up on me, berating me and essentially saying I had no reason to feel the way I do. Over the past few days I've waited for them to either talk to me about the issue, find a professional I could talk to, etc. This morning however I've been informed that they've pulled me out of my school, are refusing to let me see a professional, and will not be enrolling me into any other schools... So guess my life is over because I wanted help.",5.253776595744681,4.830558021276596,6.766019503546102,77.94562500000002,68.07801418439715,9.886879432624113,28.97251773049645,9.516144504307137,2.318566666666667,535,16,112,10,8,185,89,141,0.037000000000000005,0.922,0.040999999999999995,0.128,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,0,6,0,12,2,0,1,0,22,25,7,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,6,7,0,2,6,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,6,4,22,0,20,14,4,17,0,0,2,0,13,8,0,2,5,79,28,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602536239763546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10435217957027716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354251822720178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12251841593710615,0.0,0.0,0.1979268511233563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711388174612629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893205505308715,0.0,0.07758961288486523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025175322140368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017199651939037,0.0,0.1744198761485477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16904396147201733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163111608558686,0.0,0.0,0.20571040959163672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16016334071910662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569144012690972,0.108387226080468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546428679152461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11378223110402322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648667625426268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15777354432918025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203067202064055,0.0,0.4659028734941338,0.2445617158999591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001883026265554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24667676380867096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29325868046907666,0.0,0.10418339333891834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905095815830779,0.1218025384731206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Unoriginal_cuck941,2020/03/05,"Extreme distrust of females Im 15m and in highschool and i am growing an extremr distrust of females due to every sing girl ive ever asked out publically embarrassing me, the only relationship ive ever been in was manipulative and she constantly hurt me, all the girls who sit behind me in class call me a fatass and faggot cuase im bi, they even got ond of the football players to molest me which brought up alot of truama from when i was raped (twice), every girl ive ever talked to has always been disgusted with me, while on the other hand all i guys i talk to are mostly supportive and friendly to me",6.052857142857143,6.006939173553723,7.242337662337666,73.92636363636367,66.35537190082644,9.228335301062572,32.98819362455726,8.841846274778883,2.76599787485242,484,19,89,7,7,165,78,121,0.2,0.7240000000000001,0.076,-0.9571,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,5,9,5,1,7,0,10,3,1,1,5,15,14,7,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,7,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,7,0,1,6,1,16,2,18,8,4,16,0,1,0,2,14,6,0,2,7,66,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15710917986130496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765165078694398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928011941299464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20404190374432485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12471050626930948,0.5123818479693439,0.31816950981371905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14587797667501404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101257928642184,0.0,0.0,0.18695650475892725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021303294805087,0.0,0.4079051346666125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360229225423646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027166146783856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142649892646358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.303524639799488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dbhmn,2020/03/05,"I hear voices of people talking about me I'm a male 25 years old

Every time I walk down the street I hear people talk about me, but I know it's in my head because sometimes I think I hear them in a really loud place where it would be impossible to hear anybody, or when people are really far away and It would be impossible to hear them, but it's an every day thing, even when I'm alone I hear like short sentences sometimes they are nice and sometimes they are mean. 

I know this might not be normal, should I see a psychologyst or a psychiatrist??? What should I do???",3.9291379310344814,4.765707258620693,4.916724137931039,85.63818965517244,71.24137931034483,7.868965517241381,23.98275862068965,8.07648339933343,1.0739689655172409,446,11,96,6,8,146,68,116,0.024,0.889,0.087,0.7724,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,4,0,6,2,0,0,6,0,12,1,1,0,0,17,25,8,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,5,0,8,0,1,7,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,9,17,2,9,17,0,16,0,0,1,0,13,9,0,3,7,62,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148446012614592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418118024929986,0.0,0.0,0.06759516275521732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151238799673673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323925078216349,0.0,0.1868527136772566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380117200798917,0.0,0.7498604437410278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188024707946077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541733677455144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078751566700978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763267312219312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086448754813266,0.0,0.0,0.11635635262787293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306234663039072,0.0,0.11585241713491674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14207300351387034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836189843532435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3290076883943516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17825216076691686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736678253539362,0.07105136219717577,0.0,0.0,0.06465860093159942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15754066712974055,0.0,0.0,0.07140703969172514
mentalhealth,CelticThrowaway17,2020/03/05,"what the fuck is happening with my brain (sorry if this isn't the right place to post this, just the first thing I could think of)

For the past month or so my brain has more or less started to collapse in on itself and its fucking exhausting. I can tell all the symptoms but it doesn't seem to come together to anything at all in the slightest and that just makes it even worse? So I just wanna see if any of y'all have any clue about what the FUCK is happening bc I can't stand this shit. The main symptoms would probably be:

•First and foremost, I've been struggling with dissociation for about three years now, and its gotten a lot worse as of late.

•My internal monologue, which used to be active as all hell (really the best conversation I normally got haha) has been completely ghosting me.

•I don't seem to be able to enjoy anything anymore. I talk to people I love, and it feels like they're not even there. I listen to my favourite albums, and it doesn't feel like anything, just the sheer fact that music is on, with no emotional connection. I try to read, and they're just meaningless words. 

•Life in general just feels like a dream, like everything is unfamiliar, off-kilter, and not playing by the same rules it always has. Like the sky has turned purple, gravity has stopped working, and no one noticed but me

•Anything I DO enjoy doesn't connect with me. If I heard album which was a hundred times better than my all time favourite, I'd have completely forgotten it by the end of the day

•I keep waking up at 2 or 3 AM with a feeling that something is wrong. A mixture of fear and guilt and complete sensory overstimulation. And its awful.

•I have no DRIVE to talk to people, even people I love with everything in me.

•I feel completely exhausted, even if I sleep for 10 hours or more hours. Like I didn't sleep a second last night, I was running off a can of monster, and now I'm starting to crash.

• I'm just constantly pissed off for absolutely no reason.

• I've lost all creativity, leading to the worst ever writer's block, so I just feel completely unachieved.

• And above all else, I can never be satisfied with what I do in a day. Yesterday, for example, I watched a film, went out with my friends, wrote a really good piece (sometimes shit slips through the block), heard three albums, and read one third of the book I'm reading. And I'm still telling myself I didn't do a single thing and wasted everyone's time

Are these signs of anything? Are they gonna go away? Or is this just it now?",5.193231707317072,5.913733231707318,5.5160060975609735,82.90010670731708,68.3089430894309,8.914227642276423,29.805894308943092,9.017664075816787,2.272630894308944,1978,71,396,34,32,630,240,492,0.198,0.6779999999999999,0.124,-0.9924,0,0,1,0,0,0,60.0,0,1,1,6,24,31,7,3,28,2,41,17,8,4,9,85,79,33,1,8,22,0,6,6,1,2,4,3,0,0,26,27,0,4,10,7,0,6,15,15,0,7,13,12,32,16,58,59,16,51,1,1,3,5,14,17,7,12,32,265,58,6,0.07076967136138446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05888603581284285,0.0,0.0,0.09625160664235637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018449761252618,0.0,0.0,0.2911870478181408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649043583914548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426840395201964,0.06259002328280276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15800471634968433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609618055028818,0.37100326986534377,0.07647687335530559,0.0,0.05650382400149625,0.0,0.0,0.09128116679851214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05911897945655097,0.07960635494420483,0.06268092327486009,0.0,0.0,0.18697080195811094,0.06401521938652083,0.0,0.06762345375344198,0.12720643472972085,0.0,0.0,0.07963555542136024,0.21469963338611225,0.15167360208306604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203932926145805,0.0,0.0,0.054676472542045516,0.1962762624189247,0.0,0.0,0.040220035122391314,0.05935824269361365,0.056600971120212576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251627733288869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938774165250328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290333557598066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05768672766174063,0.07983127180555412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04998671179037284,0.20744692027797013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725345620597697,0.06016584384405212,0.12774478287218774,0.0,0.04723930516922835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05648767649860885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05458193336575008,0.0,0.0,0.06641254250364531,0.06933925211018754,0.0,0.08057173990315976,0.0,0.0,0.0959107216959292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755765906966983,0.14718833816805718,0.0,0.07393924401591588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067777782620182,0.0,0.07630167531180232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21236646791856084,0.0,0.0906737272702108,0.07276300883162423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06043691266370746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05639426549478456,0.12885210176886433,0.0,0.0,0.14528810132991374,0.0,0.0,0.14164156074335466,0.0,0.0,0.05448195050731299,0.06999301455222033,0.07922085309073773,0.10018227527817483,0.0,0.056516750966112875,0.05916661411423331,0.0,0.07398382624993934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711357153535884,0.0,0.1137639622655492,0.12371162413876233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940324500717717,0.04534634785428965,0.0,0.0,0.12379909345633418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048047961411146714,0.07697708041847999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06112227382697021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.065604194363001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051521163613805834,0.0,0.14424068227884138,0.05027274405406145,0.07737552602454341,0.0,0.045573348081913975
mentalhealth,paytie11,2020/03/05,"I don’t know what to do from here 
I’m only 17 but i have been dealing with terrible anxiety for years now. I’ve probably been actually depressed for a year now and slowly it’s gotten worst and worst. I’ve been seeing a therapist for a year and have been on different meds for months and nothing helps. A few weeks ago I swallowed a bunch of pills, not because I wanted to die but because I wanted a break from everything. I just found out my boyfriend who was my best friend was cheating on me and i’m just destroyed. I want to die and get rid of these awful feelings but I don’t at the same time. I don’t know if i should be hospitalized or what, I have no clue what the next step is.",0.9440229885057472,3.035819034482764,2.746896551724141,92.586091954023,82.79310344827587,6.073563218390802,22.080459770114945,7.3011,0.6901632183908042,540,18,121,8,15,179,86,145,0.306,0.625,0.069,-0.9922,2,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,2,0,8,1,16,2,0,0,0,25,28,11,2,5,8,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,6,8,1,0,4,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,8,2,14,2,16,18,6,16,0,1,1,0,4,4,0,2,10,84,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.17143504480484303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572672876175975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343921376396236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21418168063506132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18436178004859244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111488692906705,0.15131002009936842,0.0,0.3646492029598415,0.18354468275672156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578868232819259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882738033169457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19262035223181992,0.13572732505658455,0.0,0.09178378602489852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775233895096088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19309455803981004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951371274414538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022340640066186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18683408419957706,0.0,0.0,0.16856646016719687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360998996498816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894091152175767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13999152557348934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20397410245016512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024384530679512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108558759871391,0.0,0.14091719230463454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3393899610627333
mentalhealth,shreydhuper,2020/03/05,"I am writing my heart out P.s IT IS NOT SPECIFICALLY A RELATION PROBLEM IT IS JUST I WANT TO VENT SOO HARD AND DON'T KNOW BETTER PLACE TO

Please ignore my grammatical errors
 And thank you if you are reading this 

So the thing is I am trying so hard to be happy and ignore the toxic people in life but the thing is I don't have friends, not a girlfriend. This is eating me inside making me awkward around people which gives the weird vibe around people. I am anxious around people which make me a different human which make more difficult to make friends.  

There were some people in my life which I thought would stay around me so I ignored toxicity and thought it will become better but it backfired me because when I tried to talk to them about what they have done to me they turned the table around me and blamed me for all. Now I don't know how to make myself innocent and they have played with my emotions and I want to prove myself and want pay for there deeds 

I am trying so hard to don't give a f*ck but overthinking is killing me and I am losing all my self-confidence and self-respect. 

I want to be a stronger person so I could f*ck everyone who made me feel bad about myself and made me battle through myself. 


I just want to be happy from inside and don't give a F*CK",3.6150778210116736,5.141542365758756,4.160021400778209,88.12454571984439,72.81322957198444,6.6964202334630345,23.74494163424125,7.1686216300943375,0.8056989883268484,1016,28,207,10,20,321,121,257,0.198,0.685,0.11699999999999999,-0.9756,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,4,3,19,19,2,1,11,0,28,4,1,8,3,56,50,23,1,9,8,0,4,0,3,2,2,0,0,2,14,19,1,3,6,2,1,0,7,11,0,0,6,4,41,8,27,38,4,12,0,1,0,0,17,9,0,2,2,155,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322066567821224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.406687735919906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628907887981587,0.055697533991682695,0.1009095914858514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616164456639127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295050171398643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546088326997297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350194044929436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349302813157732,0.0,0.10277753117466253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730674367836623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04619877872605309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14118251903756462,0.0,0.0,0.26294765428022004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19452743895927732,0.2455453249789238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082723932108516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010859700322277,0.0,0.10042773665929204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290728820068382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022182454309553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17291061621430462,0.3049467070250029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167178890265118,0.07977965684958105,0.09546088326997297,0.10029543565599933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874275416451332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913934626293374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906350388430384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738691659302147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343872977537827,0.0,0.084120057207994,0.0,0.0,0.12140265780860204,0.0,0.0,0.14507314230508114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18610012436598594,0.09938294860994352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694582416817228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490572923321959,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,olifiih,2020/03/05,"Suicidal I am very suicidal. My bf and first everything, left me after 5 years, in december 2019. (im 21). I had to sell my/our dog, cause i couldnt afford him alone. We had just moved into this apartment, he left a month after. I had a hard life, and if i move from here, it would be the 15th time ive moved. My ex was my best friend, and we did everything together. Now i have nothing. My family lives far away, and i dont got any friends. I study from home, so i dont get out much. My relationship were the only happy years of my life. I have no will to live anymore. I have cried everyday for nearly 3 months. Ive written notes, and now i just need the courage. Im writing this, just so someone will listen. I cant tell anybody in my life about it.",0.4082499999999989,2.260935325000002,2.6175000000000037,94.10750000000002,83.25,6.25,20.625,7.413659706084162,0.4840000000000004,572,17,136,9,16,194,101,160,0.115,0.7829999999999999,0.102,-0.2516,1,1,0,0,0,1,30.0,2,0,0,2,9,5,0,0,5,0,20,3,0,1,0,18,25,8,2,4,4,1,1,0,3,3,3,1,1,0,4,9,0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,8,2,26,5,15,12,2,24,0,0,0,0,12,10,0,1,11,86,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12724371819198754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354757565062751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184201029644785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154290283996075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893177192747626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620889197761312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495361912280496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879770554578068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22083349254247386,0.0,0.11581948111816992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450285531253084,0.0,0.0,0.18983939636414465,0.0,0.06418817481195638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826067494407853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078450448410847,0.11005653436370527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12323647716418536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654151994151155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669709058532045,0.0,0.2603344752685605,0.0,0.0,0.2169715289019668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961279854010824,0.3917354698579431,0.09031468262947344,0.0910975659541302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11788545538652695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343895870856647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190339159029166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409708836085847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687731739091573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738320779413234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163942149006933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137062290432908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727471745231136,0.0,0.0,0.15823290142776886
mentalhealth,nota_nigerian_prince,2020/03/05,"Could anyone tell me what this is ? I am a 21 year old male. Back in my childhood I suffered abuse and blackmail, that messed up my nervous system. It gave me crippling mental illness like anxiety , OCD and hypersexuality and fuckload of other issues . 

What I want to know is that why do I feel so depressed on the days when I have nothing Productive to do ? All my OCD patterns come back , I become extremely sensitive, I avoid going out interacting with anybody , I feel like I look disgusting , people may mock me , my mind starts to weigh me down ? My life is going extremely great in other aspects like academically , financially . But still I feel extremely guilty , sad , anxious everyday when I have nothing constructive to do or when I do something as basic as masturbation . I wanna get rid of these masturbation phobias. Help me out people . There is ton of other kinky sicko shit that I do that I dont wish to put here.",6.439449197860963,7.429734805882353,7.096096256684492,71.71334224598931,65.64705882352939,9.711229946524067,33.68983957219251,9.800150414767053,3.377058823529412,727,31,125,15,11,240,108,170,0.244,0.674,0.08199999999999999,-0.9841,0,1,1,0,1,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,9,13,3,2,2,0,15,4,1,0,1,21,28,11,0,4,2,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,12,7,1,1,4,0,0,4,1,9,0,0,1,4,25,4,19,25,2,24,0,3,1,0,5,7,1,2,15,89,37,1,0.0,0.1916146555631965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371722989418747,0.1827003335213123,0.0,0.11308009571859168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24870915961628626,0.0,0.0,0.17860973768023214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930956887413784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12912221507311658,0.0,0.0,0.10429759985067914,0.0,0.13929130729451591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189537504346538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453151864329285,0.11553454900424293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449330411464008,0.0,0.18382118793178287,0.0,0.0,0.17829956960250187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10839914778079364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687962186662418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887842788983341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11422934756457365,0.2370282571997112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358061252918603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16297818983169265,0.0,0.16329357036532252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3103541006375929,0.0,0.16970050429612546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22423596506420784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16257572805382994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600576862717384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450184134124932,0.0,0.0,0.11446798091612448,0.0,0.12915175569864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14135254756091226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953880897819255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459293547994493,0.0,0.18597283369525688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414395408847152
mentalhealth,Toluse,2020/03/05,The journey to a thrilling sexual experience w/ Toluse Francis (2020) [The journey to a thrilling sexual experience](https://youtu.be/zHr08UsL-iw),10.86983333333334,15.92218765,8.250000000000004,47.78833333333333,72.5,10.666666666666668,46.66666666666666,9.725611199111238,7.3356666666666674,123,8,12,4,3,36,14,20,0.0,0.693,0.307,0.7351,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PackerBoy,2020/03/05,"I'm really struggling with anxiety about everything surrounding me I've been dealing with serious anxiety for a few years now, since my early 20s, but it was mainly related to my own situation; I still have many uncertainties about life, I don't like where I am now and I don't really know where I'm going. Recently though, I've also started to feel really anxious about the world around me. Talks of an impending world war at the beginning of the year, then the current virus situation, the underlying constant climate crisis, constant economic struggles for people of my own generation and so on. I feel like I can't find a single reason to stay positive. The only thing that gives me a bit of peace is staying inside my room with my own things, but you obviously can't stay locked away forever.",11.2288,8.181467080000004,11.309333333333335,58.50800000000001,58.2,15.6,43.66666666666667,13.816669648895859,6.058866666666665,642,28,109,21,6,218,96,150,0.19699999999999998,0.743,0.06,-0.9591,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,12,6,1,2,10,0,9,1,0,1,1,14,18,8,1,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,6,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,2,15,2,20,16,7,28,0,0,0,0,4,11,0,0,15,77,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948206345960756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094623401759257,0.15466252939476038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187356765802718,0.0,0.0,0.1286257959493155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14946368849793934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958891330127158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411419920955088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230404697343858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384455317309279,0.0978042307700258,0.0,0.0,0.1251277576274625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313307725805597,0.0778056868696485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523884713909369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669932990784216,0.13376873882302928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387991479372872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412164602960013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491198201359584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631125859222201,0.140760092914365,0.13517616417358527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324838710232525,0.3077716194689303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690134178728133,0.4377642815399677,0.10933169538957474,0.0,0.0,0.28624353017616233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003823340964748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18190584228995407,0.0,0.1345074653926164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632334927966484
mentalhealth,fro_awai123345,2020/03/05,"Why am I so angry all the time? Hello everyone, 

I (20F) feel so undeniable angry and aggressive pretty much at any chance I can get. 
I feel like it’s really easy for me to get angry and stay angry and it’s become my default, like it’s my fuel and I do it so well. 
I never used to be like this but going through the education system has really just made me miserable. 
really small things like someone walking slowly or chewing loudly will put me in a bad mood and wish that person were dead. 
I’m so irritable and I can see it coming out when I talk to people and I hate that people might think of me as a rude/aggressive person. 
Why am I so angry?",1.3811965811965834,3.345048703703704,4.280740740740743,82.86794871794872,80.48148148148148,7.116809116809117,19.273504273504273,8.139509932561175,0.9768632478632476,505,12,102,10,13,181,83,135,0.266,0.612,0.122,-0.9835,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,8,10,2,1,4,0,10,1,0,2,2,21,23,16,1,1,3,0,2,4,0,2,0,1,0,2,9,9,1,0,3,0,0,4,1,4,1,0,2,4,16,5,10,18,2,13,0,1,1,0,4,4,0,2,7,69,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317585652567498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895933488473305,0.0,0.1838052041296042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14336185740309734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15902783479153368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16830067051596798,0.11889526091665567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17390215351170052,0.0,0.09458412349173707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164311901402899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3252306976832807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574769585401704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17655241838388355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234276678689465,0.0,0.12835852356105365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23075862417767334,0.2906347334620427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16931577567079026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16730479127040612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198515985186364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262052495859114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14101279474984432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773887082522066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376746965896566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056649804947087,0.10663950323011033,0.0,0.0,0.09704474157391718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373922544208348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963758176355765,0.0,0.3003484042447349,0.0,0.1913824806188092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisfood,2020/03/05,"Women being extremely toxic to each other idk where to post this really but im already following this sub so i figured here would be ok also there may not be much to really add here or respond with since its not really a question just something im been thinking about


so i was talking to my friend thats in some kind of nurse school and her class is all women pretty much all i ever hear about is them being extremely toxic yelling at and degrading each other 

skip this next bit if you want to but im gonna copy paste some of the conversation here for context 

 
""and bc this dumb bitch in my program was like she isn't even your real sister, just like brandon (her adopted son) will never be your kid. & i screamed at her bc she doesn't know me and she doesn't understand a dysfunctional family bc her parents are still married and everyone in her family is wealthy her parents pay her bills and all she does is wait till the last minute to study and go to the gym. & fuck any man in uniform""

my girlfriend works somewhere that is also all women and comes home crying all the time for very similar stuff people being mean to her and such or will come home trying to tell me what she thinks is a funny or cool story and its basically just her being a huge bitch to some other female 

i work in construction and have had a few different jobs all have been with only men and iv never had anything close to any of these issues we cut up we laugh we buy each other food and are just generally nice to each other 

women are seen as much nicer and gentler generally but it seems to me like its definitely the opposite im most cases especially when its just groups of the same sex 

i really dont have any kind of conclusion here just ramblingd of what im thinking about i tried to talk to my friend about it but she just said it seems like that to me because men are emotionless and dont care about anything so i posted it here instead lmao",4.43391209623946,5.4048049156010265,5.298186984938905,82.87031164156484,70.17647058823529,8.350137349625841,26.246187363834423,8.626192665926032,1.7251783840106087,1546,46,309,25,27,505,198,391,0.094,0.755,0.152,0.9775,4,0,1,0,1,0,11.0,3,3,1,3,30,21,5,0,11,2,35,4,0,0,9,77,55,31,0,3,17,4,0,4,3,5,1,4,2,8,24,28,1,1,11,1,3,4,9,7,0,0,8,6,38,14,41,35,20,27,0,0,1,2,46,11,4,12,14,220,62,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937347112620156,0.13585487196758778,0.0,0.18406747970371906,0.0,0.17328875829378712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979871770904825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05177935876381329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927337758489657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08660320045097553,0.0,0.0,0.14633862155596086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933039046033564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874546085800776,0.0,0.0,0.0743326045266495,0.0,0.19910087543439728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05610285244190539,0.07683416596956795,0.0,0.08116494356998796,0.0,0.0,0.16014998171521966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271121962054976,0.0,0.1312506996363001,0.07852675799653959,0.0,0.0,0.04827403363623181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573489028069547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040587104992747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4587552858433122,0.08865653006863218,0.08429102074791159,0.0,0.0,0.17690634882805506,0.04668145457836405,0.0692384037714744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16599189229542746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252585322651777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18732463613312966,0.0,0.1310237586422139,0.0,0.09033591525095867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646015997662697,0.0,0.0,0.18863427051586654,0.0,0.08108597360469985,0.05888752347732412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270035309712286,0.08641572335964455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515356834302452,0.0,0.0,0.09668166598471344,0.21766199591048085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079851949307387,0.0,0.0,0.08596501531403458,0.0,0.15465453165222134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026422705303914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539187505317058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783414109028899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723733629567673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654501604203492,0.07424234074751856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16328064719015306,0.0,0.0,0.04952988880177088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533897960336535,0.0,0.0,0.08842677053462149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008537444587913,0.050100512421206084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367639052040648,0.0,0.0,0.06033978165524646,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheRealTiGrENG,2020/03/05,"Desire to be famous/Well known First post so bare with me. I've been battling this desire to want to be famous, have a career like no other, and everytime I realise its not possible it sends me into a horrible mood that can last for a very long time. Sometimes I can't watch movies because I leave the cinema wishing I was a part of the movie, while listening to music I realise how much I want to be a musician, but then I remind myself that I have no talent and I'm too old to try.

The point is, I really want people to know who I am. The feeling of someone recognising you for something good just sounds great. I want that. 

I'm at a great university, doing a course I should theoretically love but I'm just not happy.

There's nobody I can open up to about this and it's getting ridiculous letting it hold me down for so long. So I thought I'd come to Reddit in the hope somebody would understand or listen.",2.5387903225806454,4.319930876344085,4.296438172043016,84.96465725806455,76.25806451612901,7.015591397849463,23.990591397849464,7.865858978985527,1.267678494623656,717,23,145,11,16,242,117,186,0.086,0.6940000000000001,0.22,0.9777,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,1,9,11,2,0,12,0,16,1,0,1,0,31,34,12,0,10,7,0,1,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,11,7,0,1,5,1,0,2,5,2,0,1,3,5,19,8,21,25,2,18,0,0,1,1,6,7,0,2,9,102,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016858803082224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415480361827285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308566110715378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977140275447444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085850967486826,0.0,0.0,0.13782470212667208,0.0,0.3623290795230528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17492281522475076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16320788128951474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030655272632664,0.13394358889093708,0.0,0.17399226781520988,0.0,0.16802940860166654,0.0,0.08027896575371175,0.0,0.0,0.2908379199987743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830616481078832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079488012738547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724273021334041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17794368617670314,0.0,0.11391952739819992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553365072496859,0.18524729626160866,0.15737414513179251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526827349183357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922869398487153,0.12650237370922696,0.16251772195145334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045256032398625,0.09581692676473083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11156320788448157,0.0,0.0,0.17106401006203253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355820768634441,0.3876832551553442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18896110012861944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672896062819114,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Viper46_,2020/03/05,"I just want an answer. I crashed really badly yesterday and I'm still feeling it today. I'll always have these kinds of episodes every week spanning a couple days where I feel nothing and everything and I fucking hate it. It just feels alien and I don't want to feel like this anymore but it's so hard when you have nothing up your sleeve to even try and distract yourself and no answers to go on. I feel as if I'm too emotional at times and I hate it. I'm so fucking sensitive, I don't want to be this sensitive because it feels so shit and you feel everything and it gets too much. It just means I can snap easier and it makes me feel weak-minded. I just want an answer on why I feel like this. I'm meant to be happy, I have a loving family and a caring girlfriend who I love very much but yet I still feel like absolute shit half the week.

Everything just feels like It's crushing and pushing against me. I don't want this to go on. I'll just sit in my room not even moving or having the motivation to sit up and do something about it or try and distract myself. There just is no end, I just want to know why.",1.4802331002331002,3.3789806752136786,3.131686091686096,91.55447552447555,79.85470085470084,6.305827505827506,22.602175602175606,7.348242739294969,0.7645965811965816,874,28,192,12,22,289,112,234,0.151,0.66,0.19,0.645,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,3,0,1,23,18,6,2,7,0,12,6,2,2,0,53,47,24,0,7,14,0,12,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,17,14,0,0,18,0,0,4,6,9,0,1,1,12,23,9,19,44,2,27,0,0,0,4,7,10,4,3,15,124,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726253114727051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208689051642152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752977820775164,0.05660335031566827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467153341826356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274193590473966,0.0,0.0598835861132215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444901568761866,0.08224168463735054,0.0,0.0,0.12265927915263153,0.0,0.07823407163030073,0.0,0.2503553938494559,0.0,0.08753512726397128,0.0,0.5164512709763878,0.2653416041885162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168530851479755,0.04851273720760233,0.0,0.10554290753293794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884553214749156,0.08317955363596602,0.18334954299008108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669385904773194,0.051030503077429436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18145642305105308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167609945708234,0.0,0.06198121908924471,0.0,0.0,0.10114596643280237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375675563682216,0.0,0.0,0.09868982856416048,0.13651774574451755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17819313711658424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948508488260181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906279867438801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07148406816539793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830773277862527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414430989249787,0.0,0.08801537823560783,0.0,0.0,0.12608446345039692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661483449148697,0.32860857182579417,0.0,0.14896484475925614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16757380988806658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,friendlyneighborhud,2020/03/05,"Should I see a professional? After watching a video from Chris Ulmer (SBSK) about Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD) and I saw myself identifying with the interviewer a lot. Therefore I used my old friend Google and I found that I can identify with the “9 major symptoms” or whatever of BPD. I know it’s not good to self diagnose so I was wondering, people of Reddit, should I see a psychiatrist on this matter?",3.9186999999999976,6.836165853333334,6.00225,68.72737500000002,77.13333333333333,9.616666666666667,28.04166666666667,9.827888789773867,3.6407666666666665,329,14,53,11,8,114,58,75,0.08199999999999999,0.853,0.065,-0.2826,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,6,0,4,2,0,2,0,15,11,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,10,2,9,6,2,3,0,0,4,0,4,1,0,3,2,38,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5471942802792382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204867459877796,0.0,0.0,0.2489676391186889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381845815109387,0.1678335427364113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18220458816570492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193854802097962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468358060787207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279493087158328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15060188959845314,0.18967932487162625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462128746776449,0.0,0.22662121455849335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257880834978792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18761941433944704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355797335993077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suckzor,2020/03/05,"Do I have ADD? I am seeing a psychologist tomorrow for the first time ever and I'm really nervous and anxious. I don't want to blow things out of proportion but my self destructive behaviour is just becoming worse. I'm overthinking this so much, need advice, help EDIT: I'm so sorry for so much text, I just wrote what came to mind!! I'm kind of panicking so I just kept typing, it's all related to my title but I bet you could cut this down by 75%. Anyways, whether you read it or not and just comment from the title alone, I'm very thankful.

I don't know if I'm just mistaking depression for ADD or something but I'm so anxious and overthinking this. It feels like I'll just look like a lazy young adult male looking to get hopped up on free speed, I can't fucking calm down and I'm really nervous about seeing a psychologist tomorrow, I'm so scared I'll be ridiculed or she will think I'm overreacting, I don't know what to expect. It feels like I'll be all cloudy like I get in most conversations and forget what to say.

But my (ADD? I don't want to be disrespectful and self diagnose) has gone to the point now where I've started having extreme bursts of aggression a few times a month when I'm home alone, but it's like a switch being flipped by the tiniest gust of wind. This was *very* common for the vast majority of my childhood, and it's scary it's returning now that my issues have started making me depressed too. Like I'll drop a fucking fork on the floor as I'm eating lunch and that sends me spiralling into aggression, I'll throw the chair on the floor, start screaming about hating life and about how I can't even just sit down and focus on a simple one-page E-level assignment. I had no idea procrastination could be this brutal. Same shit in elementary school too, teachers gave me a book I could draw in because I spent lessons just nonstop drawing on tables and daydreaming out the window, couldn't focus at all. The only school work I have done what so ever all of 2020 was a simple TWO page assignment, and that only worked because I managed to get hold of illegal amphetamine which helped me quite a bit but also made me very anxious because I don't want to resort to drugs, but I just can't do anything it feels like. And it's not about motivation, my motivation is totally there, has always been. If anything my motivation can be really intense and make me super disciplined about something, I just can't direct it and it's so temporary and I end up reading a book I like or playing a game for hours on end and loosing track of time.

I don't even talk about my interests and hobbies or worries with my parents *in the slightest* nowadays because I'm scared shitless of the slightest ridicule. I pretty frequently have bouts of anxiety where my head becomes completely clouded with racing thoughts like ""why am I so weird"", ""why can't I just be normal"", ""why does it feel like everyone looks at me like a fucking alien"", ""why can't I accomplish the simplest fucking chore"", etc.

Conversations have always been hard too all my life and the depression that's been creeping in recently just makes all the symptoms worse. My mind feels pretty damn clouded most of the time in the sense that I cave in and fixate on what the person just said and what I'm going to say next so I end up not being able to think about it at all and give up so I just switch topic or say something super open which leaves conversations stale.

It's been like this all my life EXCEPT a period of about 8~ months I had two years ago in which I actually managed to do good and get good grades and get into working out. I couldn't keep that shit consistent at all, fell off all the time, but I ways managed to get back into it quickly. I've also never had trouble sleeping. Other than that this self destructive behaviour has been with me all the time. 

I read about various symptoms online and on other Reddit posts and it is scarily accurate. I am the only male in LITERALLY my ENTIRE close family who isn't diagnosed with either ADD, ADHD, or depression, which makes me even more worried.

I'm nervous and scared I either: won't get help cause it doesn't seem that bad, or I'll get too much help (like trying medication) and it'll be unwarranted because I'm blowing things out of proportion. Am I?? I just don't know, please help. My behavior sounds like ADD to me and it's ruining my life, especially school. Thanks for reading, it means a lot to me.",5.065786442006272,5.855390707954545,5.8281504702194376,80.30136363636366,68.625,9.06896551724138,29.945141065830718,9.223106411051027,2.4651230407523514,3533,130,690,66,58,1156,341,880,0.18899999999999997,0.698,0.113,-0.9971,1,2,4,0,0,0,90.0,0,2,0,12,56,57,16,6,37,0,63,20,4,10,15,154,134,65,0,14,40,1,6,14,0,3,10,6,3,7,50,49,2,4,18,8,3,6,23,32,0,3,20,17,69,26,91,97,28,92,0,5,5,4,31,45,7,15,51,438,119,25,0.04935644652207966,0.0,0.048164772052543985,0.0,0.059316857308365674,0.048230548311330716,0.04375151184424934,0.0,0.0,0.10223678694284567,0.0,0.07894066490342826,0.08213703473772888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037757546494856034,0.16727620744798347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123230009176158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03795206078385405,0.041210571225788015,0.15043615844942868,0.10902063488914647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05388445639453654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564506261138771,0.0,0.05070266643709395,0.0,0.0,0.05174929513270897,0.0,0.0,0.11822131913182422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17004254026703064,0.10019150854974704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04319215895869561,0.05050878098430561,0.0,0.0,0.057237808330920514,0.05050396664246981,0.0,0.0,0.13114548554728608,0.0,0.055045484659538964,0.09779840230830047,0.08929146317822331,0.0,0.047162199775895516,0.0,0.0,0.04652886516976559,0.0,0.1247805117842462,0.14104102102903215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04198256819792857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18251695796191636,0.2062936495646461,0.047347200912116735,0.02805040597825432,0.08279569128395213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04421368148969506,0.04872927264386881,0.050653953466820084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16541292857254555,0.0,0.04950854014031419,0.0,0.0486061577252084,0.0,0.0,0.055717420436109236,0.0,0.05151530696166957,0.0,0.04387027746055628,0.0,0.051397143878124114,0.08137503667784013,0.0,0.0,0.05226135035859801,0.0,0.0,0.1394476712883173,0.3375829335238661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434095301954153,0.0,0.0,0.04196108582984185,0.0,0.04670226308814292,0.13178324525030596,0.0,0.0,0.05376363960065357,0.0,0.04972142730946645,0.0,0.0,0.09967188209197664,0.0,0.07879168945191446,0.0,0.10884800165775446,0.03659717970285903,0.03806673428624012,0.0,0.05249114081290936,0.0,0.04835883822578939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033445205518237035,0.1126134050001056,0.0,0.0,0.05480449292112368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04309614533618972,0.0,0.05417855681852445,0.046657795376738434,0.0,0.047269832386186594,0.1004265001515526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05249665628132124,0.19747921230986,0.0,0.09485701045826317,0.0,0.048733536534478684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04694928315502436,0.11775068189119348,0.14824323981094162,0.1498540766857956,0.07866139535484894,0.04493225521520992,0.15446861389062674,0.0,0.10132736616743976,0.0,0.0,0.049392091157483366,0.0,0.0,0.11399101161151046,0.0,0.05525050100967481,0.10480424065369223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260049236457318,0.0,0.03967084212548209,0.0,0.09088156941961928,0.0,0.0,0.0655804598781838,0.06325123601077252,0.0,0.039183505369955365,0.17268084528632086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033509787346253074,0.0,0.09642815295979056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12217271221785996,0.08733513282047144,0.039176849895744215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17814606432805102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779624270154492,0.10024773452419933,0.1005968712903833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03178393334555546
mentalhealth,aditisingh13,2020/03/05,"Scientifically Proven Methods To Reduce Stress  [**How to relieve stress**](https://www.calmsage.com/how-to-relieve-stress-and-anxiety/)? Exercising doesn’t just make you muscular but there are several ways that it even helps you relieve your stress. Take muscle building, for instance, it helps you detoxify which occurs because of inflammation and stress. When you run or ride a bike in the morning, you get a lot of oxygen and fresh air which further purifies your mind. And, also for the time you are exercising, you get to focus only on your workout which helps you divert your mind.",6.395204081632656,9.799360561224491,5.570775510204083,72.57779591836736,70.93877551020408,8.001632653061224,30.20816326530613,8.841846274778883,3.049274285714286,477,20,70,10,10,144,63,98,0.087,0.745,0.16899999999999998,0.8338,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,12,0,0,6,5,0,3,4,0,3,3,1,2,0,11,7,8,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,0,4,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,12,2,9,7,1,9,0,0,0,0,15,4,0,2,2,46,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147019783714719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972457064330453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874344041254931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947350370902355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498738942690894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28841698020203993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194018292564382,0.0,0.0,0.09574152285716636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28964950011363044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908598553493187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203657056628273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8215004879766128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784250576520413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363595875218292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384910919869645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsD3X,2020/03/05,"Working alone in an office is causing me to feel depressed So i have been working in an office for almost 2 years now. My boss and i are pretty much the only 2 people in the company at the moment. My boss travels all around the country, so he is barely here (except for Friday every 2 weeks). Since about 9 or 10 months ago i started to notice myself slacking, feeling unmotivated and irritated with being alone. Wich slowly turned into feeling depressed asf while at work.

I had an intern to keep me company for about 6 months, but since he had to go back to school im all alone again for 8/9 hours a day. And im only getting less and less motivated everyday. Wich is really messing with my head. 
I don't want to slack and do nothing at work, i want to feel useful. But i just cannot seem to push myself to even get out of bed in time anymore.

I really don't know what to do about this feeling. Quitting ain't an option, since i am very dependant on this job. 

Does anyone have any past experience with this? Help or advice would be greatly appreciated.",3.725785714285717,5.156338852380955,5.262083333333333,80.713125,72.38095238095238,7.345238095238094,25.982142857142854,7.865858978985527,1.5403571428571428,829,27,158,11,16,280,127,210,0.077,0.8170000000000001,0.107,0.8827,1,3,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,6,13,4,0,0,9,0,19,1,1,6,2,38,35,12,0,3,6,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,11,0,1,8,1,0,3,4,3,0,0,3,5,16,1,33,29,5,30,0,2,0,0,3,11,0,6,16,104,20,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137717615772888,0.10103388853033488,0.0,0.11413167666044705,0.35413793833415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750838735338775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303473088750968,0.07969549076828253,0.0,0.0,0.10146385019590856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876414120815439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708595504613227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07350584869276182,0.0,0.1963367474010191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974219380469117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528084905527993,0.0,0.09603068562064464,0.0,0.0,0.11149154752501847,0.0,0.0,0.2881514212182529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190967392671367,0.0,0.06477585508191051,0.0,0.0,0.1256602376655815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116973463829231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639649777758008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224455829043682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462298148754112,0.0,0.11310475908884984,0.10130814995658936,0.0,0.0,0.06263887454624006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18195098714623795,0.0,0.08378633790902743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10936417326623904,0.12976376902164571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17336955498902928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880411019665627,0.07901742198805624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595576237369808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122875519876375,0.0,0.0,0.1460333935442531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535098591630315,0.0,0.10376053931555214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828492905726904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806736310081234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06646100724507616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12397443688556307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843968409387294,0.0,0.09404310592061957,0.1344533815665968,0.0,0.09142561468105756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33190696305894873,0.0,0.0,0.0809661148605742,0.0,0.0,0.07339756372584709
mentalhealth,MoonchildinCancer,2020/03/05,"Feelings of depression when having a cold or the flu Hey! I don't know if anyone else feels this way, but when I have a cold or the flu, my depression symptoms always come back. Even though I haven't had a really bad depression for a year, I always have to keep fighting it (like probably many of you on this page). And when i'm sick, it feels like i'm getting a depression all over again and it really messes with my head... Does anyone have the same problem and if so, how do you deal with it?",3.5874789915966367,4.304606039215688,4.7850140056022425,86.70970588235296,71.94117647058823,8.573669467787116,24.375350140056014,8.841846274778883,1.467911484593837,384,10,84,7,7,127,61,102,0.28600000000000003,0.652,0.061,-0.9816,0,0,0,0,2,0,14.0,0,2,0,0,9,10,1,0,8,0,8,5,1,1,1,20,17,14,0,3,5,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,2,8,0,0,1,5,8,2,8,16,3,10,0,4,0,0,5,2,0,4,8,57,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748529684346946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309676487341294,0.16922610212839606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269979686747172,0.13790183524965216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227085396663122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027287328837626,0.5690088168120999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445327694237739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797012118549595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908672832921948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505298189267121,0.11799045164179478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628936711241053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950197335177564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146801939278542,0.0,0.0,0.090767704884095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161377823689399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674464798064327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17807058724961114,0.15803596820486818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21161165593201609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17166464542644808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622690190998545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109644781003554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635772835543617
mentalhealth,chooeychoco,2020/03/05,"Is mental illness a right? I hope this doesn't offend anyone. It's just that i feel like i'm not worthy to have any mental illness. Not that i'm a good person or anything it's just compared to other people, i had a fairly good life. Like i don't have a reason to have mental illness. Unlike others who really went through something rough causing them to be depressed or something. I feel like ashamed. It's like i'm not ""worthy."" This is also the main reason why i don't want to get myself checked. I know this sounds so stupid and i'm really sorry if i offend anyone. Just wanted to know your insights if it's okay.",1.5157964869775924,3.717721960629923,3.2719685039370066,89.00427013930954,81.36220472440945,4.537613567534828,20.005451241671715,5.369823440869387,-0.029537371290127006,487,13,94,2,13,162,68,127,0.218,0.642,0.14,-0.884,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,0,5,13,3,1,5,1,10,4,0,3,0,22,23,7,0,5,10,0,3,4,0,0,4,1,0,1,12,1,0,0,7,0,1,1,6,5,0,0,2,4,11,8,7,20,1,2,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,5,4,59,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359197075614105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509793201735362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21612709428893825,0.0,0.12717982638830125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15876335663546073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311195623758992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562882135055858,0.2208182280673873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074494538195895,0.0,0.0,0.2592550409454759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350102446602398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698710656612969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916181497179923,0.3020173631053513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46724406771531607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714411598352397,0.13494534257112525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980147980243913,0.3178021447051424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198313794533387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23795718452228545,0.0,0.1730038203606091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823128159145201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432675339090244,0.13945552143302206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigManAlec,2020/03/05,"Helping someone who struggles with depression A very good friend of mine struggles with depression, and I try my hardest to help her. I struggle with it, too, so I understand what she's feeling, I just dont know how I can maker her feel better. Any tips?",6.057278911564622,6.507118673469389,6.192244897959185,79.75870748299323,66.34693877551021,8.982312925170069,36.74149659863946,8.841846274778883,3.2183823129251703,201,10,37,3,3,64,40,49,0.242,0.494,0.263,0.0699,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,8,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,11,6,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,10,3,5,6,0,0,0,2,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,26,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245742470821512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18527303263468975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3608593645848062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24551562014873304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21184447667892425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184809256039148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757066231789274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.280827629157098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512783402128547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774965103658281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6569996528029934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14222700449136294,0.0,0.0,0.21808194824046054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17284759931762142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Penelopeisnotpatient,2020/03/05,"My SO is depressed and I think he might be developing a delusional disorder. I need help. Hi there. I'll do my best to keep this short and avoid ranting, but it's rough.

My BF (37M) and I (31F) have been together for 2yrs now, he moved in one year ago. Don't get me wrong, I fiercely love that man, but honestly, he's a mess. He's never had a purpose, he just picked a random career and now he hates his job with every fiber of his body, but there's nothing else he can do for a living because he doesn't have even the smallest skill in anything else that he can turn into a job. He feels worthless and miserable.

I'm pretty sure he is depressed, even though it's not diagnosed all the signs are right there. In the last 1,5 year he changed 3 jobs, and recently I start to see a pattern. His boss is always an asshole who humiliates him all the time, calling him an incompetent flake in front of others, and his co-workers are bullying him making him feel dumb and excluded. He has had panic attacks because of this and he's visibly depressed. 

Problem is, despite changing 3 jobs in 2 years he's never been fired, he just got convinced that they were about to kick him out and applied for a new job (which he got). He says his co-workers are awful but he's been out grabbing beers with his former co-workers several times, after he resigned. Also, I know the world is full of assholes but what are the odds that the same exact scenario keeps happening all the time? 

Same thing with sex. Our bedroom is completely dead, even though we cuddle a lot, we can't have sex because every time he panics about his perfectly fine boner: he is worried that it won't last and guess what? He gets nervous and it stops working, doesn't matter how I try to make him feel comfortable. Being with him I can rule out any medical conditions, I know it's all in his head. 

Also, his family lives across the country and I don't have the chance to talk to his parents really often but I've been under the impression that sometimes he talks about them like over controlling, super intrusive parents but lately I've been reconsidering his description as well. 

So, either he is developing a delusional disorder, or he is just desperatly trying to find an excuse for his failure. Or maybe, he is so biased that everything is going to suck that when he gets a new job his attitude toward bosses, co-workers and the work itself is all messed up and he makes this happen. I tried every approach I could think of. To be only supportive doesn't work, looks like I'm allowing him to give up. Now I try to be his lucid POV and play the devil's advocate, but I don't push it too much because I don't want him to think I'm discrediting his words and downplaying his struggles. Ultimatums won't work with him, he'll just think that he is so worthless that he's been able to ruin our relationship on top of his career, so I can't threaten him about leaving if he doesn't fix this. 

He's been in therapy years ago and every time I try to bring it up he says that it's a waste of money, his problem is that he is a useless flake and no therapist will help him with this. 

I am running out of resources here, I need other points of view to be able to help him getting out of this, or at least, make him willing to do that.",6.4253231035228,5.618228048411503,6.985110870974715,78.62031164901664,65.7927382753404,10.095889345148043,32.80401988329371,9.3871,2.73503636049276,2584,92,522,42,35,852,296,661,0.191,0.7,0.109,-0.9965,8,1,1,0,0,0,73.0,4,0,2,10,33,40,4,7,29,1,62,10,2,10,10,101,104,43,1,7,18,2,6,2,1,6,2,2,1,1,35,33,1,5,10,2,1,7,16,25,1,1,12,11,61,15,65,80,13,62,1,9,3,5,92,28,2,9,29,329,96,14,0.12218801113077647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831229946471001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771370835596943,0.05083510676914768,0.0,0.0,0.041546018787182906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05027516103367827,0.0,0.0,0.06950325114763786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14896935495440952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411438964026335,0.0,0.0,0.06786166752547915,0.0,0.0,0.06238381040157754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12925871422426502,0.0,0.06405590247321204,0.0,0.06852212217031935,0.04877859217948469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786053241463674,0.062009129630154876,0.0,0.0,0.14003804662870814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207240447662694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105604345394905,0.0,0.20589733860677345,0.0,0.05490735283795111,0.0,0.057593991219793375,0.0,0.09267289465000386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055838814275533034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276763853833018,0.05860693708442712,0.03472113127472088,0.0,0.09772491458852517,0.0,0.0673019349293655,0.0,0.10805045471084196,0.0,0.0,0.0603176821647816,0.06270007533112068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285007237233884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3637582413836481,0.1086063184930202,0.0,0.0,0.06715133542492256,0.09959953728818534,0.06891669934533284,0.06468973061572744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05969489028365715,0.0,0.10789425241661343,0.0,0.051303577756441926,0.0,0.0,0.05193993878937932,0.05513972529199315,0.0,0.16312289247049858,0.0,0.061377140182903175,0.0,0.0,0.06154578319175955,0.0,0.06481108529923411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493325933789593,0.04491112365693623,0.09060086201480344,0.09423892683600417,0.11800994255179427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05862134605443187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04139887929639857,0.04646474423380536,0.0,0.14336130418425336,0.135675326384511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0577535825870289,0.0,0.0,0.062154567351467585,0.0,0.11691742480080125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03913838436660773,0.0,0.06032296006007201,0.06559209818390753,0.0,0.05217394694086642,0.0,0.0971688107188545,0.0,0.0,0.04868401256804916,0.0,0.0,0.0690188365715807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060423533673846265,0.0,0.04324265158830273,0.0,0.0,0.05107732426114566,0.0,0.06386871954769081,0.0,0.0,0.06932875351888156,0.05758037722752124,0.0,0.0,0.09821009494731828,0.0,0.0,0.06986631975940201,0.07093484928148333,0.04058814261462417,0.1565862875939067,0.12004910055357006,0.0,0.1781220297507807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20739409731524364,0.0664527344698122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03603482737356907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0549308480983931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.355817309421577,0.062043928225254,0.0,0.0,0.06679670438808462,0.0,0.15737014615382605
mentalhealth,thickybitchy,2020/03/05,Death is consuming my every thought it's all I think about it's all I can think about I try to think about other things I enjoy like politics but still my mind is flooded by constant reminders of my inevitable demise I can't stop it. Its like a infection in my mind every tv show video I watch picture I see reminds me I'm going to die it's gotten so bad that sometimes it feels as if I'm not living like life is all a video game like I'm a passenger in my own body existing to the inevitable destination. Its not even death that I fear my mind just can't cope with the unknown of it what happens after death I don't know. And every time I try to grapple with the concept I hyperventilate and start to feel as if I'm breaking my mind.,1.1074999999999982,3.2140444294871813,2.9625000000000017,91.18875,82.26923076923076,5.694871794871795,23.211538461538463,6.9077264865688965,0.7073153846153848,585,21,127,7,16,195,85,156,0.113,0.738,0.15,0.4648,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,6,0,7,3,1,0,3,25,23,8,4,2,6,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,13,4,0,1,7,5,0,1,5,2,0,0,2,4,19,5,18,21,4,10,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,2,10,78,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243322790876505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16287726826248924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845921319050102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521828952565996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685034464678416,0.0,0.3706362952494134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650039665642507,0.14828506748087025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333545607152228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12966792255152068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058618711427164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357189922609863,0.28655177549182803,0.0,0.12948046913409084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5922339775104241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684827774329808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450247313753011,0.0,0.10378826839887044,0.0,0.11710206624905695,0.122592552602531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741708440094267,0.28187135352683723,0.0,0.11641098146734875,0.08550343863060607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19910966091004986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,winx1,2020/03/05,"Can anyone with Pure O / intrusive thoughts help? Since the age of about 21 I convinced myself I am depressed I tried about 6 different anti depressants with no real success, I was then given about 30 CBT sessions but came to the conclusion with the therapist I am not clinically depressed but have OCD (intrusive thoughts/‘pure O’) with some low mood and anxiety. I am 30 now.

6 months on from CBT I feel like I am struggling again I wake up in the morning and I dread what my mind is going to throw at me.. it doesn’t take long before I have a thought and run with it for the entire day, my current theme is that I am mentally unwell and I need to try out medications and go back to see the doctor but I’m worried that this is just OCD tricking me into starting the off the whole procedure again

Other thoughts I have are:
-I haven’t been truly happy since I was a teenager 
- I’m going crazy

I am also really stuck in my head all the time I find it very hard to be in the moment

I know these are really common OCD themes but I’m stuck, I don’t want to ask for more help because I’m afraid of starting the cycle again.

I’m not taking any medications at all at the moment and haven’t been for around 18 months, I’ve been reading up about combining antidepressants with low dosage antipsychotics but again I’m not sure if this is just OCD giving me more solutions to a problem I can’t solve

TLDR:
OCD intrusive thoughts for 10+ years do I got back to doctors or is it just OCD tricking me into worrying

Thanks for reading",4.727694805194805,5.320087418831172,5.587428571428571,82.43257142857144,69.29220779220779,8.757402597402598,29.03636363636364,8.841846274778883,2.1344903896103897,1207,42,244,20,20,396,160,308,0.155,0.73,0.115,-0.9164,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,16,18,2,3,15,0,29,7,2,0,4,48,59,15,0,4,13,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,11,17,0,0,8,2,0,6,9,11,0,0,14,3,30,6,40,44,6,43,0,5,1,0,4,16,0,3,22,160,41,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879569433448266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550849613857677,0.0,0.0849424706893152,0.0,0.0,0.07763916735232941,0.0,0.0,0.09884585400792796,0.10380395794478138,0.0,0.0,0.17076013194717635,0.0,0.06768670194947471,0.0,0.09448371877298414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269959544305867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160923200316878,0.0,0.2869062247172905,0.0,0.0,0.1160093076058474,0.0,0.2273007297932307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056143292924369856,0.07932435967722253,0.0,0.0,0.10148517271184447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651614310390926,0.18931347575424687,0.0,0.08880587781044938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820021317099474,0.09946672103063672,0.0,0.11395528462739185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885059164341033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102265030021727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424673078262389,0.0,0.0,0.09826363730166984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22371479473332093,0.1118984811138793,0.0,0.11211501685232696,0.0,0.17725624128523998,0.0,0.0,0.08233201446617346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062467497105546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221327093600298,0.12638362594129635,0.14226540261074774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848156050367549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18370076060397414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15718413873555076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160792563072362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465040498377176,0.0,0.16697096796672914,0.0,0.0,0.10222731299128086,0.0,0.12892171017632645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3526016985076613,0.06474616335455742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507727272402126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161658167251877,0.06549209053048519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396807107142907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22552551852520786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150374103263847
mentalhealth,obscurebird,2020/03/05,"anxiety might kill my relationship I have a long history with anxiety around a vast number of things... but a big one is disappointing or angering people that I love. My biggest triggers are yelling and aggressive body movements (like stomping or slamming doors), these things can literally make my flight response alert me that I’m about to die somehow (I feel so stupid for this but I haven’t healed it all the way yet.) 

I moved in with my boyfriend and his mom earlier this year and, for the first time in years, I started experiencing intense anxiety on an almost daily basis.
I find that I’m acutely sensitive to my boyfriends tones and body language — I always feel that I can tell when he’s frustrated with me, which feels like fairly often. 

Here’s what I’ve learned since moving in together: his mom is a NIGHTMARE. Quite certainly one of the most unstable people I’ve ever met and she RAGES toward her children completely irrationally, then turns around and acts like it never happens.
That being said, I can cut him a little slack and understand where his pent up aggression is rooted. And for the hand he was dealt, he is truly one of the most sensitive and patient men I’ve ever known. 

For some back context, I’ve only had one other truly serious relationship, and that man left me because my anxiety was too much for him; he cited our future children and that they deserved a mother who could hold herself together. Yea.... that fuckin hurt 

So anyway, tonight my boyfriend was acting a little aggressive and it was definitely stirring something up for me. He had already told me that he was feeling angry toward his mom, and I know the difference between what’s just a trigger for me, and what looks like it might become violent. 
But he kept saying critical things to me and expressing very obvious frustration. My anxiety came out full force... I cried, I questioned whether he’s really happy with me (because he IS frustrated toward me often and I CAN tell even if he denies it.) And then he said it... “it’s emotionally exhausting dealing with it. EVERYTHING makes you anxious. You impose your anxiety onto me.” 

In our 1 year together, I’ve checked in as level headedly as I could as often as I could that I’m not putting too much pressure on him; that he feels comfortable being honest with me.
Tonight he used the phrase “I wanted to finally be honest.” 

We didn’t break up, but I can’t stop thinking that’s because he’d feel too bad for me. I don’t want to break up, but I feel like I can’t really get past this... and I have never meant to impose my anxiety on him. I truly feel so sorry I’ve repeated this mistake and it makes me wonder if I simply cannot have a healthy relationship until my own healing process is further along... but how can I ever know when that will be",6.034868727151878,6.8428538079096075,6.589771241830064,75.63393569292127,66.47645951035781,9.862878032568961,33.320095269746325,9.916854025145753,3.3427865957682514,2216,94,396,48,34,724,256,531,0.21100000000000002,0.677,0.113,-0.9953,0,0,1,0,1,0,64.0,3,3,1,2,26,31,13,1,17,1,39,9,4,8,8,97,74,43,2,8,13,4,9,5,0,3,3,4,1,4,36,31,0,3,18,0,1,7,9,20,0,5,15,15,67,11,50,48,8,65,0,2,1,2,55,29,1,16,31,279,103,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187193294062133,0.0,0.07920509871353941,0.0,0.059722249234278865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3843518156234114,0.0810849120137889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778929129155267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055190266858920325,0.05992882537560097,0.13125946088682966,0.07926944951590974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15945088656212478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209106581383457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525434322002053,0.0,0.0,0.17191862619683487,0.0,0.0788410704526514,0.0,0.07399650099672384,0.0,0.0,0.07449074332812895,0.07498922110069456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073680805617038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047406472009616764,0.1947728099310274,0.0,0.0,0.06450641730475873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29033131174136384,0.10255163261066527,0.0,0.0786256084969936,0.0656007195628421,0.061051471103572674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03749928638795124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347007605809203,0.07640543765457472,0.0,0.0,0.0736614864002976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683623532182303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794080035430522,0.0,0.07889092883927712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798335507411319,0.0,0.0,0.17532731522151565,0.14387408791859288,0.0,0.06351829672847699,0.060272619693600815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477941379276654,0.0,0.1437303862296421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228309864528938,0.0,0.2521847685005916,0.0,0.15257016437016546,0.10552523603860756,0.0,0.11071405242895244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945454111928717,0.054587847102201964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851701421142882,0.09951899455858056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721533362898033,0.08040402186216444,0.07634116328670447,0.0,0.0,0.09196134302950497,0.0,0.0,0.2311773035116,0.0,0.0,0.13654823546568293,0.05707807360278702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05937272292022036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05525562354560388,0.0,0.08034583186877323,0.05080245876999071,0.0,0.0,0.06000681189865365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254683958260478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14305164225551684,0.045990290414956864,0.0,0.0,0.04185236908501183,0.0,0.0,0.06858374321514409,0.0,0.0,0.07807019641619252,0.0,0.07471993026720276,0.0,0.06199024303252594,0.0,0.05922159386445695,0.08466908317086984,0.056971367450956566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783653408563262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386615425041912
mentalhealth,SlipperyPenguin2,2020/03/05,"Is something wrong with me for always wanting to be talking to people? So growing up I met my best friend in middle school. We were friends for about 10 years and he and I were really close. During high school, we would play video games every night and we would message each other all day about random things. I was his only friend and I had other friends, but he was always my best friend and the one I looked forward to talking to.

Early last year, he found some online friends he liked to play games with. He slowly stopped enjoying all the things we did together so we just stopped doing everything we used to and I sorta felt useless. It became harder to message him and I got toxic toward him because I felt like he replaced me. We’ve since made up, but it’s not quite the same. We still message each other, but I still feel alone.

Before we made up, I met a girl online and we became extremely close. We would message each other for hours everyday and we liked the same TV shows and video games so we would talk about those things endlessly. I told her about my friend and how most of my friends sort of replace me after a while and she assured me she wouldn’t do that. Eventually she stopped talking to me and now we barely talk. We occasionally send each other pictures on Snapchat, but we aren’t as close and I miss her a lot.

After that, I met someone else online. Something drastic happened in my life so I currently go to bed 4 AM EST and my new friend is in PST so we’re usually awake at the same time. I really enjoy talking to her, but she’s the only friend I have. I don’t really have any friends at my college and she’s the one person I look forward to talking to everyday. It’s just that I feel annoying and she has a lot of friends so I feel intimidated and I don’t really think she wants/needs me as a friend.

I was thinking about trying to find more friends (well I never really stopped, but I don’t really get along with a lot of people because I’m introverted), but I’ve been told I need to be more independent. Currently I feel lonely if my friend isn’t responding and I don’t think that’s healthy or normal. 

Is it wrong to be wanting to talk to a friend a lot so I feel less lonely? Do you think I should try to work on being happier alone and if so, how would I go about doing that?

Any advice would be appreciated. I’ve been really depressed over this for a while.",2.387239925023433,4.367605927835052,3.6960801312089977,88.1962101686973,77.35051546391753,6.553420805998126,23.60004686035613,7.520522993642371,1.0138556701030923,1885,61,389,26,44,616,194,485,0.084,0.711,0.205,0.997,3,6,2,0,0,0,41.0,15,1,0,4,22,35,1,0,16,0,39,1,0,6,4,110,71,44,0,14,13,0,7,3,16,8,1,0,1,2,19,46,0,4,13,9,0,6,9,8,1,2,20,9,73,27,52,38,20,49,0,5,2,0,75,19,0,12,31,271,92,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05210298870107858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044539905564872,0.0,0.0,0.08873183371781387,0.0,0.0,0.07251788507895551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500588310403131,0.0,0.04537078481365157,0.0,0.11191060119758964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034386528156167405,0.0,0.045923822475777226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044541421257987435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044923797679728365,0.0,0.0479199357643456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347991640825284,0.0,0.10238975133031833,0.0,0.048732860991092995,0.0,0.0,0.058461844465465776,0.6591095634689396,0.0,0.027857126003909355,0.0,0.06060515739159871,0.0,0.04264430342762299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0471500680822577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0563347525677419,0.0,0.0,0.05250875587007197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043462334116656766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03766098819065267,0.07814732890952604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954954203767604,0.0,0.0,0.18132059928197955,0.0,0.10090399430207814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039535574595602085,0.04112312001099467,0.05149609819404212,0.0,0.05003653749880612,0.05224157903847957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226105554402626,0.08110343857086177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392975808978355,0.046556343482083457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056711623334945636,0.0,0.0,0.2391038972890078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792392702332583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04410626395587095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04517725758060289,0.08209558185240788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516170055893807,0.1783092406463269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34284817592101485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626889221706644,0.1366593808523761,0.0,0.0,0.031090904160189618,0.0,0.0,0.10189772449525347,0.0,0.07240058977588669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04605074329427489,0.058723660091630187,0.0,0.06289819209157664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04794044105758874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03881707487712612,0.0,0.0,0.2272589437054776,0.11659253699568592,0.0,0.06867174344730644
mentalhealth,Status-Bake,2020/03/05,"What happens if I tell my counselor I feel like killing myself because I know I am going to fail an exam? It seems stupid, I know, but I've always been good at school but this semester has been dragging me through the mud. I failed my first Algebra Exam (Its a college credit class) and I have another exam tomorrow that I know I am going to fail. I have been feeling awful lately and relapsed for the fourth time into my eating disorder so my brain always feels cloudy, I try my hardest to pay attention but as soon as I leave the classroom I don't remember a single thing of what was taught. I try to sit down and do my homework and study but I feel like a total moron so I pretend like it doesn't exist. I feel like I'm at my tipping point and I feel like telling someone but I feel like they will completely disregard me and act like I'm being dramatic and send me to my college class just so I can fail. I don't know if I can handle that. I don't want to be admitted to a psych ward, my family doesn't have insurance so it would HAVE to be out of pocket and we cant afford that, I just feel so helpless right now.",3.5111117021276605,4.152867055319149,5.051316489361707,85.00718750000001,72.06382978723406,8.087765957446809,27.45345744680851,8.278499904357787,1.7187500000000004,878,30,186,13,16,297,122,235,0.19,0.6829999999999999,0.127,-0.9518,1,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,1,0,1,5,9,17,3,0,8,1,25,2,1,0,1,40,46,22,1,4,9,0,8,7,0,2,0,0,1,0,11,11,1,1,16,1,2,4,6,8,0,1,5,8,39,9,19,36,2,18,0,5,0,0,6,7,0,3,13,129,50,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926570726309067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139320283633932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057130805184349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923575892660075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213809062235476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13268055205901194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845991763223268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913609171634256,0.0,0.4682876258876535,0.4135246408500737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098472494367088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158763569039916,0.09710099445488914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237356437334674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808052026017966,0.0,0.25449301729554713,0.0,0.1305917346800407,0.12258196079241708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39590995676026974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943850482789937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114296619655244,0.09886553332989198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716374482505075,0.0,0.10539115253074563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809014228930593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20237327091214102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691134372127488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750545243998128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719821284582755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828316881558387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223851010587087,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Neenyweeny,2020/03/05,"Scared to come off anxiety meds I have heath anxiety and have been taking citalopram now since July 2019. Before I started my meds I was really struggling. I had multiple panic attacks a day, if I felt my heart beat it would lead to a PA, if I saw something online about health, it would really effect me. I began dissociating and life did not feel real anymore. Flash forward to now and I feel great and like I’m ready to come off my meds, but I’m just terrified of these symptoms returning. I’ve looked extensively online and there only seems to be horror stories. I have a GP appointment booked to talk about it but I just wanted to see if anyone had any advice from experience!",2.9864685314685318,5.428321772727281,4.550303030303034,80.5243006993007,77.48484848484848,7.394871794871796,23.79020979020979,8.384062270229773,1.7761321678321682,542,18,98,11,13,181,85,132,0.163,0.7909999999999999,0.046,-0.9391,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,7,6,1,3,3,0,11,4,1,2,0,25,26,10,0,6,8,1,3,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,5,1,0,4,1,4,0,0,8,6,14,2,13,15,0,12,0,0,3,0,2,3,0,4,8,61,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14612863310531501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016922415244936,0.0,0.2287951869461738,0.0,0.1483033713714127,0.10456175611899128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701231937203959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12724741772053166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576307187059539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644084690662193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14627869016498352,0.0,0.0,0.15122370583483385,0.0,0.1435817289842223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648682378134274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15895389211135474,0.0,0.17720546941339144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10562443466091533,0.07305762835663789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255758306711267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4983152623797176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373181187834215,0.0,0.17545282070287171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17020911382444345,0.1915981435561957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14971550023194985,0.0,0.11916391772245745,0.1361354839790464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12370092817958105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512310002890032,0.0,0.0,0.10584509172835194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15633154376052116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542918575575404,0.11243537396698536,0.12019448538119885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820249149112018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124576704237551,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mAke_LoVe_nOt_-WaR,2020/03/05,"How do I talk to my father about seeing somebody for depression? My father works very hard for us as a family and it seems at the end of the week he has nothing for himself. Over the years we can see he is slowly withdrawing into himself, getting more irritable, complaining and only seeing the negative. 

I came back from three months abroad and he seemed happy enough to see me but that night at the dinner table he hardly said anything while the conversation flowed between the rest of us. Then he went to bed without saying good night to anybody.

His relationship with his parents is pretty sour, long story. They’re on talking terms but everything between them is awkward. My mother and he have had their disagreements over the years including coming close to separation, now when they have an argument it’s usually over something small and he resigns and just grumbles. 

He has no friends. He lacks self control with eating people’s snacks (he’s not overweight I just mean he doesn’t have respect for what belongs to others). He uses my tools sometimes and leaves them out or breaks them accidentally. If I do that he goes fucking mental. In my opinion I think he doesn’t respect himself enough to respect others) But he works so hard. 

His relationship with my sister isn’t that great, she is heartbroken over the lack of affection shown over the years. When I came back from my trip I was press-ganged into talking to him by the whole family. Thing is though, I’ve tried in the past and he seems happy to vent but it’s the same the next day. I need to convince him to see a professional but I’m afraid his pride and financial worry (time is money) will prevent him from actually trying.

I have had mild depressive periods in my life, he doesn’t seem suicidal, just numb. In the past he has admitted to being depressed or losing interest in the things that make him happy, but I cannot help. I don’t know what I’m doing and I don’t want to fuck it up. I need some advice on how to get him to see somebody.",3.770556315549477,5.9548384625323045,4.521469068247459,82.91912106703148,73.93540051679588,7.343638850889193,26.111035111719108,8.219915518859313,1.7873542179662558,1603,57,296,27,34,514,205,387,0.16399999999999998,0.703,0.134,-0.8898,2,0,1,0,0,0,36.0,3,0,5,5,13,23,2,2,19,0,29,8,0,6,0,58,59,28,1,6,14,5,3,0,1,1,3,2,1,1,14,21,4,2,8,0,1,6,11,11,0,1,7,12,43,12,52,50,10,51,0,5,6,2,57,20,2,9,24,203,57,3,0.0,0.0,0.07883563118296857,0.0,0.0,0.07894329312461856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648011998470665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12423912910147332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847956732985809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959011698293416,0.0,0.0,0.09060853928320628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521003850152281,0.0,0.2087429840104266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266440217259162,0.0,0.0,0.07155255241069976,0.16694738182225854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260538464042691,0.0,0.15231598936600665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062415180932186586,0.14937099221424655,0.08441486058900596,0.0,0.0,0.06775959174560046,0.0,0.0890670182021386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579950842714674,0.2171055735524076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054149255043141636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04439795660914583,0.0,0.0,0.08554087077376131,0.0,0.0,0.057061648558289824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149320266676205,0.0,0.09037904021879936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053925384030230616,0.0,0.0,0.08799980321690941,0.0,0.0,0.08141344049597349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448273608704888,0.0,0.0,0.11980381670835825,0.0,0.0,0.08591698955795679,0.15162466281430226,0.0,0.07751649202581411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06144150925051922,0.0,0.0,0.08970346182446251,0.0,0.15423904718600445,0.05600694613697955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218856011928292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17346818857104318,0.0,0.0,0.07684613075873083,0.06424439089348136,0.0,0.0,0.3862566241837952,0.2941787160542128,0.08427757574035638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062193126958536564,0.07989957040309396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836693858360023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947985474805392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073414598978236,0.05176450444499495,0.07937198454233921,0.0,0.047107055119401685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096969890511246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19435158875969008,0.06977329740800932,0.08897453346794408,0.06665703632607171,0.04764976577237221,0.0,0.06480177849583875,0.0,0.0,0.07488957262062346,0.0,0.09019485409549996,0.0,0.07787496803638733,0.0,0.11762656218612655,0.0820422591978248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15607090036930338
mentalhealth,burnergirl5637,2020/03/05,"I would like some advice. Hey guys, sorry if I make any mistakes I don’t usually post on reddit but at this point this is the only place I can think to turn to. So I am a sophomore in high school and lately the workload has gotten to a point that I cannot handle. I have probably slept a max of four hours these past two days because of my desire to finish my homework. I usually have no problem doing so, but ever since this semester started I find it extremely difficult to concentrate; I seem to get sidetracked for long periods of time and end up doing only a bit of work at a time. It is very embarrassing for me because I find that I am having panic attacks where I cannot breathe every night because I am afraid that I am behind my peers or that I am not working hard enough, but I cannot bring myself to return to the way I was. I look at my text book and feel almost nauseous. Opening my book bag causes an immediate difficulty to breathe. I’m not sure what I can do anymore but tonight I’m doing something risky; I’m not doing my AP World History homework. When I woke up this morning I absolutely intended to stay up all night if need be until my homework was completely finished, but upon sitting down and trying to get my work done, I found that I was feeling very light headed, and I could not remember the words I had just read. I could not make any sense of what I was reading. This scared me and I laid on the ground for a bit. I considered missing school tomorrow, but I cannot do that as I have something that I absolutely must do at school tomorrow. I would very much like to confide with my teachers the problems I am having, but I am afraid that they will call my experiences excuses and punish me. Ideally, I would hope that they would give me an extension on my work, but I know that is wishful thinking. Even if I am destroying myself mentally and physically, I know that I have certain standards that I must meet. I don’t exactly know what I’m asking here, but I’d appreciate any advice or opinions. I just need to escape for a bit because it’s getting especially difficult to breathe right now. Thanks.",7.351729971988796,6.035281185882357,7.9621512605042035,74.02415686274512,64.2,11.012885154061623,36.70868347338936,10.07000556051586,3.548174229691877,1684,70,326,31,21,564,203,425,0.133,0.792,0.07400000000000001,-0.9795,0,0,2,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,2,5,10,21,3,5,15,0,49,5,5,4,7,74,82,27,0,20,21,0,3,2,0,7,0,0,3,1,24,10,0,0,12,4,0,1,12,14,0,2,10,5,63,7,40,62,7,51,0,1,1,0,9,22,0,10,26,235,87,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16175674387229633,0.0,0.0,0.08287859786970618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885197838902088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208203261928383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737541495295112,0.0941587329210644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018145262986335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710784300681885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845137521656797,0.0,0.0,0.0850238958052724,0.0,0.0,0.08677899973601315,0.0,0.0,0.13216447741523285,0.0,0.0,0.05337748338704737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469876701630652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330646743755627,0.08551982002747248,0.0,0.054666429151871136,0.07486695074493514,0.06973426492615242,0.0,0.0,0.08096142458931826,0.0,0.0,0.08369836127364348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15129398735119526,0.0,0.0,0.09074908980515556,0.0,0.0,0.12972608985689638,0.07939707632571294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195175232321622,0.0,0.0,0.07414244086770748,0.0,0.08494220845429121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744724985440976,0.0,0.08220571413193918,0.08150823576606404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13645875307625055,0.0,0.09336410858931496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808709684534253,0.0,0.0,0.0732456628970498,0.06950293397934165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104944345179973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340906821103207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084283005144105,0.12274047944532762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15534132651940144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589515944406687,0.0,0.09710854189559268,0.0,0.0,0.07900989768500392,0.0,0.0,0.08647327608820009,0.0,0.15648200820118058,0.0,0.07926733613748334,0.0,0.08923618199030288,0.15839254126763858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16557760322105022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375820121157427,0.07068205665670918,0.0,0.0,0.08286360896593986,0.2512920581393126,0.0,0.07534742557284882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846522454599635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743524256289146,0.0,0.0926502129205364,0.058582486638684664,0.08821797407960692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800635612489004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620018464453192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606673924746852,0.0,0.0,0.09652351134501802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0561929552821356,0.09002608041350756,0.08085075012889219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823110013742643,0.204872853516424,0.0,0.06569611891412529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517727977654952,0.0,0.0,0.2410197109725899,0.0,0.0,0.23517951443282284,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,borkatas,2020/03/05,hi i am very down right now hi i am very down right now. i got a lot on my plate i dont know what to do,-5.145714285714284,-4.067962714285712,-1.0599999999999987,115.13000000000002,104.71428571428572,2.8000000000000003,7.0,3.1291,-2.9746,76,0,28,0,4,28,18,28,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,4,5,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,2,18,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3978354559944313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271490937780115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865540543520716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28859012565105113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5797806564398473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5601672386499156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,devanesence,2020/03/05,i’m so afraid to tell people i’m suicidal all my friends have so much going on in their lives and they don’t need the extra stress ya know. like i know in my heart i deserve comfort and love too but at the same time i just feel like i don’t deserve it. one of the only reasons why i’m still here is because i can’t stand the thought of them hurting over my loss but at the same time i can’t stand the pain of my existence. idk man. i just feel like i’m in limbo.,0.5967619047619017,1.8786311523809545,2.4457142857142853,98.30761904761906,80.33333333333334,5.428571428571429,21.19047619047619,5.82211442006289,-0.18566666666666665,361,10,92,2,9,120,62,105,0.157,0.71,0.133,-0.5499,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,3,1,7,11,0,2,6,0,6,3,1,1,1,16,18,6,1,1,4,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,5,0,1,1,2,15,6,11,17,5,13,0,2,0,1,8,7,0,0,6,56,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610058827644965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20919034497573166,0.2955631795272622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598203495656244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756391321439462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24513136398509655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22144905387163116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273708684104436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.303185609584106,0.0,0.18266211470871346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867001920992436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15206668821326993,0.15338486230160026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14017441466022984,0.15732716527612764,0.22011476330387567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14341141972239713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126876326554212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651995177408638,0.0,0.23695865681101444,0.0,0.0,0.2262724357046943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18080569297867555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16422458299963189,0.2412447069365938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866599405226536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OddRaspberry3,2020/03/05,"Treading Water First post. Yay?
I’m Bipolar type 2. This is my first episode in about 3 years which is a success in its own way I guess. It comes on the back end of a severe stomach illness where I was unable to eat anything solid for about 6-8 weeks so I survived on Gatorade and popsicles. I thought it was just the stress of being sick and trapped at home making me spiral, when I started to improve I had hope that returning to work would bring my mental health back into shape. It just made me overwhelmed and the anxiety hit hard. Now I can hardly leave the house.
The good thing is I have a wonderful SO who takes excellent care of me. He reminds me to eat and bathe so I don’t spiral further. I see my doctor tomorrow. Praying I can get back on track, I despise this hollow feeling and these nasty voices telling me how worthless I am.",2.3289423076923086,4.465141165680475,3.2619193786982272,90.48921042899413,78.17159763313609,5.645118343195268,26.538831360946745,6.6274283507984215,1.0767304733727818,663,27,133,6,16,211,116,169,0.14,0.654,0.20600000000000002,0.9128,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,6,14,10,1,2,8,1,13,9,1,3,0,18,29,10,0,2,2,0,3,0,0,1,5,1,2,0,11,7,3,0,3,1,0,2,1,4,0,2,5,5,21,6,17,21,1,27,1,2,1,0,3,10,0,3,13,90,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831204503026167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272693863685974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3567646477025961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768293671893835,0.0,0.0,0.13322315735552773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582978100382169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165050767493469,0.0,0.0,0.13698003915323173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819913579992865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631020264940176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080180593856437,0.0,0.0,0.12971880411817974,0.0,0.0,0.17037192489829694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770842684958412,0.0,0.0,0.1643929690325023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15513340177602294,0.15360911982294514,0.0,0.17845320723345806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16375924314391302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634002382152295,0.10323462919136148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15585770026381493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811848377408068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232414631421298,0.0,0.0,0.17471818682898654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094668941767822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17715886634330932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628268238794562,0.0,0.1351768786487724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274712001308142,0.0,0.0,0.122780240829611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275938611743645,0.1240563733437365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16771872555256254,0.1125920079079265,0.0,0.0,0.10986376857706084,0.0,0.0,0.099593922336307
mentalhealth,throwawaysaaaad,2020/03/05,"Side thought I find it EXTREMELY odd the majority of people (society?) don’t have suicidal thoughts every day. 
Speaking for myself only: I feel everyday periodically and without reason I have strong suicidal ideations. And then I will recall at some points that this shouldn’t be standard of living I accept.",7.500849056603773,9.812280547169813,7.834103773584907,62.495683962264174,64.28301886792453,10.58301886792453,37.778301886792455,10.686352973137794,4.91794716981132,251,13,35,7,4,82,44,53,0.256,0.6990000000000001,0.044000000000000004,-0.925,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,1,0,12,9,3,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,6,2,5,4,2,7,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,4,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088744291987987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232535043047641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13397970480290586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421830422401688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23397844876815024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015260041147588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18370082693827436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504877389082413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724392107265565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5796809435782785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42072230731726257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554271748916239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Limorgolan1,2020/03/05,"Today was tough in my eyes, even though everyone else said I did great Today was my first official day at a new job as a veterinary technician. It didn't feel real, I was trying to be positive and learn, but in the back of my mind I felt something bad was gonna happen. I can't shake the feeling of something bad happening as soon as I get comfortable.
Prior to this, I accepted a different position at a different clinic. The manager was a douche and told me I had to clear up my past because he didn't call my references until after I was hired.... so I didn't get that job.
Because of this happening, I can't seem to get comfortable in this new position. I'm so afraid and so negative all the time even though it was a good day and I learned a lot. I'm having trouble sleeping and concentrating and its really rough.
I'm sorry about my rant and grammar, but I need some reassuring vibes.
Thanks reddit",3.521813186813187,4.958052280219782,5.299780219780222,80.22021978021981,72.9010989010989,9.595604395604397,28.384615384615394,9.957137785484203,2.8690395604395604,713,28,142,20,14,244,101,182,0.154,0.679,0.16699999999999998,0.3771,4,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,10,13,0,2,11,0,16,3,2,0,2,24,34,18,0,1,2,0,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,7,7,0,0,8,0,0,1,6,6,0,1,15,6,19,7,19,17,3,21,0,0,1,0,5,6,0,3,14,95,26,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067925764724908,0.2186468735840848,0.15963086528819947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369704980499456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16888167598743478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735938614416422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937757133765948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17295978734090425,0.0,0.0,0.12511192183978762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13240713717054667,0.0,0.12571604154154384,0.0,0.0,0.11137139098624788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20522098536820046,0.0,0.0,0.10982023851528784,0.0,0.1443538978146136,0.0,0.0,0.34735038462549034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598612439252188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113144025427535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220482485095367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970850280160372,0.0,0.2529114695827045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499019337315845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14903021558303184,0.08387891810816757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12454709645514896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191963230994984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102737950652316,0.0,0.0,0.2015969654079721,0.0,0.14656857391678538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054535055546757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572816644644968,0.0,0.07634798108566528,0.0,0.2482180102072348,0.12511192183978762,0.0,0.08889479106687219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Simonphilo,2020/03/05,My new subreddit I've created a subreddit r/bodyissues where you can share freely your issues with about your body. Hope some of you join,5.359230769230769,7.251840307692312,4.910769230769233,83.0092307692308,69.0,9.815384615384616,28.384615384615394,10.125756701596842,2.8855230769230773,112,4,21,3,2,34,23,26,0.0,0.596,0.40399999999999997,0.8807,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,4,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,3,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,1,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5392813259738106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4822112915735895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.506736120711639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46889916368125295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GregSmall,2020/03/05,"I feel lost I think I've been avoiding these feelings for far too long. I just feel sad most of the time. I'm 21, I work in a department store, and k hate every minute of it. I feel like I need a change but I don't know what to change. I'm overweight and I can't bring myself to fix it, even though I know it hurting me in the long run and draining my self-esteem. I have almost no sex drive, even though I have an amazing girlfriend who I love very much, and I know that will eventually start to wear down out relationship. I just don't know what to do.",1.4082499999999991,2.754056658333337,2.7583333333333333,96.66,78.25,5.8000000000000025,20.333333333333336,6.2581,-0.19251666666666625,429,10,106,3,10,139,75,120,0.146,0.7440000000000001,0.11,-0.0414,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,7,8,1,1,5,0,8,4,1,0,0,21,25,7,0,1,3,0,4,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,8,5,1,1,9,0,1,4,4,5,0,0,2,4,17,3,11,22,2,13,0,3,0,2,4,5,0,2,5,64,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17043162110104015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36009997976147423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22483218538049304,0.0,0.14340160334683638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3442347665628564,0.12159156069194545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16803815709563544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18220358920941096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3741518654675149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315156510729478,0.0,0.0,0.3012448904068015,0.0,0.0,0.1857943936174312,0.0,0.15361296204176972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511724889873482,0.12620181460763075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18273207628815893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775566635753598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046907672904199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905786764917592,0.3344430504292336,0.0,0.0992455165491471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404335716815293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390828607809155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-floating,2020/03/05,"how do I tell my psychiatrist I'm not willing to take ssris at all? I have my first psychiatrist appointment tomorrow and I am very nervous because I have no idea what to really say and I feel like the first thing they are going to try to prescribe me is anti-depressants which I am not willing to take. I am mainly going to get treatment anxiety but also depression. I feel like if I tell them I'm not willing to take ssris but want treatment for anxiety it will look like I'm drug seeking. I'm also scared they will ask why I'm not willing to take them which I don't have a good answer to. 

advice on this please? I genuinely have anxiety and depression but ssris aren't something I want to put in my body",4.91334865900383,5.192786296551726,6.3995402298850586,77.87670498084293,68.79310344827586,9.754789272030653,31.28352490421456,9.725611199111238,2.8847777777777783,563,22,111,12,9,193,74,145,0.175,0.728,0.09699999999999999,-0.9114,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,4,2,3,8,0,2,2,0,18,2,1,1,1,19,36,10,0,3,8,0,2,3,0,6,1,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,0,0,3,7,4,0,2,0,4,20,4,14,30,2,9,0,2,1,0,8,3,0,1,6,79,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502154753394865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22099460014050312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171070537646862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291735728344886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842292846757136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15347961234903687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3570259058416786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16023739577675133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397293490791931,0.19742235566327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23506062136980316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072189952182497,0.0,0.1570543714200178,0.11589337834332655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598106584485474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202513781801355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603094225795453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167301307819828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13890253384240747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851748386965601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988111510778432,0.13833578061712445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637271281121924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.415557112058648,0.0,0.24153946294848025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179633542192353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093810738286002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400761030535385,0.16299662351454408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246800945398176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kathrynrachel,2020/03/05,"Suffering badly. Hi all, I’m not sure what can really come of this post but I’m hoping for some advice. 

A week ago, I broke my arm and hurt my shoulder and the man I was with broke up with me because of his own mental health issues. We are still friends and talk every day but my stomach sinks when I think about him moving on. I get angry and sad and spiral into a worse depression. I can’t get myself out of this. I want to be happy and loved. I want him to be happy and I know for a fact he would be loved (he still is) but so much by me. I know time will sort things out and all I can do just now is put myself forward and first but it’s really, really hard. I’ve never put myself first. I don’t really know how? I’ve booked a trip away with my best friend to our favourite BC town for a week, so I’m hoping that will help a lot. I also have some health issues but I’m hoping they settle and I can start working out again. I’ve started anti depressants a few weeks ago so I’m also hoping these kick start my brain into feeling normal again. 

I just need a friend right now, I’m sick of going to bed every night thinking about ways to kill myself or hurt myself. I have never felt this unwanted and unloved before. I just want things to be ok.",1.190814606741572,2.8348559138576803,3.0236563670411982,93.19930477528091,79.74906367041199,5.6485018726591765,16.742977528089884,6.42735559955562,-0.38860786516853896,967,15,219,8,24,323,140,267,0.20199999999999999,0.594,0.204,0.1561,0,0,0,0,0,3,24.0,2,0,1,4,18,25,1,0,9,1,19,9,4,1,6,60,49,24,1,11,10,0,3,0,3,3,3,0,1,1,9,21,0,0,7,1,0,7,5,11,0,2,2,3,34,14,27,40,9,41,0,8,0,2,17,11,0,9,23,145,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067751993138433,0.16451310325879462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14841514280474594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718330323229094,0.0,0.07747936783941202,0.05656654644746911,0.0,0.0789611181010289,0.0,0.0973818971196327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358913220972267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993407634751326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05984464941427499,0.0,0.15984719616617468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15636640665155235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04691958827142821,0.0,0.08909708395319199,0.0,0.0,0.15786157519772698,0.0,0.0,0.2150779473082687,0.0,0.0969623878178138,0.0,0.05273714142244219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19756252427334325,0.0831254697467296,0.0,0.0,0.19727201184056287,0.0,0.0,0.06219806596734007,0.0,0.0,0.3686627266709842,0.0,0.0,0.19867644335037826,0.0,0.0,0.1937062893680916,0.0,0.0,0.10266314878266172,0.0,0.15299196813274604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889039892553176,0.16750096462643735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935148330030079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09862565979282772,0.06821449050714072,0.06880580064147508,0.14313737570146282,0.0,0.0,0.08708116826802159,0.09091871584730528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887129254022301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18656781100583705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377856291670364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924582861707423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970408579936497,0.0,0.14821130212178849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874575333671863,0.0,0.0,0.07458454658876656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329682464580895,0.11891768629767155,0.0,0.0,0.05410910490844824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16419745419269724,0.07365579931496702,0.22330198026587436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755535850433428,0.0,0.09456532343968448,0.06591841118003595,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Charlificent,2020/03/05,Anxiety I had serious anxiety and I was put on Xanax after having a serious (vomiting blood) reaction to valerian root. I can't get any more xanax. I am now taking st Johns wort andahswagandha?? Whatever that is. I use cbd at least once daily also. Is there anything else you would recommend? I know I need to be on medication but I can't at the moment before those comments come rolling in.,1.725200000000001,4.479211453333335,4.641666666666668,75.1425,87.8,8.866666666666664,26.16666666666667,9.120678840339163,3.240066666666668,309,14,55,11,10,110,59,75,0.084,0.89,0.026000000000000002,-0.1999,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,10,5,1,2,0,8,16,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,2,0,9,0,8,12,2,10,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,38,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22724377452975345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19323950108391788,0.0,0.4347653971737006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23384062585700205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24180042789803066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447798907777967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373803927704417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846260683874904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15616767783576518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862627222771018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21070208270972385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026226244519647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856606999630523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21365401375611165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24542421911616585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20186011055843103,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I-Crow,2020/03/05,"I think i just had a panic attack I was laying in my bed getting ready for sleep and watching tiktok cause i had it installed. I stumbled across a video about growing up through school. I over thought it immensely, vented all my insecurities to a discord friend and spent 5 minutes hyperventilating in my bed.",6.270263157894735,7.808560543859649,6.528903508771932,73.63440789473684,66.3684210526316,7.805263157894737,35.30263157894737,8.07648339933343,2.8470736842105264,249,12,42,3,4,80,43,57,0.201,0.675,0.125,-0.6705,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,2,3,0,3,1,1,1,1,7,7,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,5,1,9,1,9,2,1,6,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,30,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4109798940040221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3711085589390157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791048384572099,0.0,0.18874090947265487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4238550904098622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656095057577791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36151605153113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314777180031751,0.0,0.2867962423645813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tjrszrjys,2020/03/05,I feel like I'm spiralling Everything seems like such a blur nowadays. Nothing I'm doing seems to be right and nothing I do will ever be right. I'm so tired of being wrong all the time. So tired of being useless. I have no purpose. I won't ever accomplish a single thing. My life has absolutely no meaning. I want to get better but no matter what I do it seems like I won't be able to. I'm just so tired. I want to go to sleep and never wake up. Everything fucking sucks.,-0.2981461538461545,1.9319027700000009,2.2780000000000022,92.43130769230773,91.3,4.676923076923077,19.69230769230769,6.297961479604792,0.1582538461538463,367,12,79,4,13,126,58,100,0.239,0.637,0.12300000000000001,-0.9214,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,7,8,2,0,3,0,13,7,2,0,4,17,28,6,0,2,2,0,1,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,0,1,9,4,8,20,2,8,0,1,0,1,0,3,2,4,7,52,12,1,0.14866075789602146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314783595706818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689443330119232,0.0,0.0,0.2672134069918782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516734594821826,0.10620327514474168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743447518733315,0.07766911025416226,0.0,0.0844873346008191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500348972288127,0.21788441148919926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16193514674331833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465634113443213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852880132080897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25391094994924235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4060055120428341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14876811891747732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876360187619156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866852834273168,0.5125910169616408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753679333489954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16253720160255564,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BobaDragonTea,2020/03/05,"Just a small vent/ramble I recently joined reddit despite already reading different threads on here. I wanted to share some of my experiences that could possibly help others feel motivated. I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression in the past but recently I decided to see a therapist again to help myself do better in my wonderful relationship. Well, I have been diagnosed with PTSD and as you can imagine my PTSD episodes caused a strain on my relationship. I have been doing better but I simply can't get over the guilt and sadness over the fact that I hurt my loving partner; a person I would never consciously hurt. My episodes as we call them completely overtake me to the point that I am not myself and I can't remember what occurred during them. I feel awful that I say terrible things to the man I love and he just accepts me and does his best to understand what I am going through. I love him deeply and well I am making a positive effort to break this and get better. Today, I cleaned my apartment and ate a decent dinner. I also took a nice shower; I always take care of my hygiene but this shower was more for enjoyment and relaxation rather than one just to get clean. I also made a big step in reaching out to one of my closest friend about what is going on in my personal life. My boyfriend has been supportive and I honestly can't thank him enough; I'm thankful that our relationship is super healthy and good despite these mental roadblocks. I never thought that I would make it this far but honestly taking baby steps and creating and reaching out to your support group does wonders. To those of you struggling with anything please don't give up and be patient with yourselves.",6.764125,7.5598521625,6.8381250000000025,74.53437500000003,64.875,10.025,34.75,10.008157457239328,3.5842625000000004,1372,60,235,29,20,439,179,320,0.08800000000000001,0.589,0.32299999999999995,0.9985,3,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,2,3,2,8,11,32,0,3,13,1,25,8,0,5,3,55,55,23,0,5,9,0,2,0,2,2,3,1,4,4,17,22,2,0,12,2,0,5,7,8,2,2,9,4,49,24,37,42,4,31,0,4,1,3,29,18,0,3,7,179,66,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018653224851076,0.14763901395575446,0.07680851708535077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061616393412222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596247575047207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687264382986896,0.2449195368475375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425785193760873,0.0,0.0941152196812276,0.09482681311156507,0.0,0.0,0.09678427355083848,0.0,0.0,0.07370125822360155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950564201057866,0.18738346766042754,0.0,0.09644330118136073,0.0,0.0,0.16156052820388875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537991542581056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902959551084376,0.0,0.0,0.09334844971603704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131773632648733,0.0,0.14468299249340189,0.0885512437066683,0.10492271086782336,0.0774244442702742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12374560918563372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976374757869261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520060577339791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499375412785789,0.087345046818021,0.1232340037194162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302580231294053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238884664606186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510199072431766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881194249073111,0.0,0.16120138867623385,0.0,0.1013276074633796,0.0872618809481533,0.10406457437828394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158086589898507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233402143829876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822880840775564,0.2973160939880408,0.10456814922158793,0.0,0.0,0.07340785465598705,0.0,0.0,0.07355835462483737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650145240917604,0.0,0.0,0.20950241231293745,0.0,0.0,0.1388098221124709,0.0,0.0,0.16997152623782033,0.0,0.1071779116689154,0.06132602533196733,0.0,0.0,0.0732830677728303,0.0,0.0,0.08749817774022177,0.0,0.10255874137524996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609696744727704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054446264203978016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16599382799915285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002104353011979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114738892855454,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Slayerswordz,2020/03/05,Really bad stress Heyy everyone! Just posting to find out if anyone has serious stress problems and thinking about the future. It causes me to stay up most nights and I get really tense and freaked out. I’m really young and it really scares me to see where I’ll be in the next 10 years in my life. Does anyone else feel this way?,1.9101948051948057,4.3132891969696985,3.2841125541125566,88.31045454545458,81.27272727272727,7.40779220779221,18.51948051948052,8.418075326091056,1.0137298701298714,261,6,53,6,7,85,49,66,0.287,0.713,0.0,-0.9642,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,3,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,14,7,5,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,4,0,9,6,1,14,0,0,1,0,0,6,0,2,5,28,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26019739053540336,0.19064224113469885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535378170345668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911366607925696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16282388315868074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543070945682042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17778996676596506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940784066416673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17005706023239822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720958011503092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142090997530445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19787877208824575,0.17460633950488447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781957154014722,0.0,0.0,0.17803595768936975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4767836619730893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862802612014496,0.0,0.14826711786513014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19831705931329388,0.0,0.0,0.4262661907329633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922085061444665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14768714932842225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981766075479153
mentalhealth,Awestech101,2020/03/05,I need help My sister has boderline personality disorder and has started to affect my daily life. Her moods often are very extreme going from happy to suicidal in a matter of hours. My family and I have seen her almost commit suicide on multiple occasions and thankfully stopped her. I tried everything in my power to help her but she always gets worse. I feel powerless right now. Any ideas and help would be appreciated.,5.131597744360904,7.8560148289473695,6.499548872180451,67.80184210526315,71.76315789473685,9.606015037593986,29.27819548872181,9.957137785484203,3.681235338345865,341,14,51,10,7,115,58,76,0.185,0.616,0.19899999999999998,-0.1673,2,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,1,1,15,13,5,2,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,13,2,8,10,0,9,0,0,1,0,10,4,0,2,4,35,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19830269842439374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16478036271705845,0.0,0.0,0.13467008294662636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226964410859383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798041730409433,0.0,0.18668906916273906,0.0,0.10013206859722976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346472364759507,0.0,0.11254742970004854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21081114478605495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3982145562762292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950238482754328,0.0,0.0,0.223556566862613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398774494861526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14683988934137718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729158712115632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16912017004977126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401696635737661,0.0,0.0,0.1655655029228044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43323466111733183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182323333452182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344522584999215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339899857734108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018138223806173,0.14067785147465106,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwawayacc6282,2020/03/05,"I don’t know if this is normal Rather not say any personal details except I’m in high school. 
I have a weird problem where whenever I’m alone or nobody is talking to me and I’m not doing something I enjoy my thoughts tend to travel into thoughts of murder/suicide. Most of the murders involve my ex-girlfriend from 3 years ago who I deeply resent, they vary with the most common of just bringing a gun to school and raping then murdering her, or alternatively the ol’ bat. The suicide ones vary with bridges to guns to dying in a classroom with my good friend. This has been going on for some time and I don’t want to tell my mom or ask to go see a therapist or whatever, I have already disappointed them with failing grades and don’t want to add more their plate. I don’t know if I struggle with depression when I’m around friends I’m genuinely happy or playing a game but after that ends after the dopamine rush I get down, I’ve tried committing suicide before but couldn’t bring myself to it for some reason.

Please if you have any help I would be so gracious",4.995030181086519,5.746291215962444,5.412116029510397,83.35869718309861,68.76525821596243,7.963648558014755,30.237759892689468,7.957251820313856,1.962021059691482,851,32,167,10,14,272,134,213,0.16,0.7190000000000001,0.121,-0.7627,0,1,1,2,0,3,12.0,0,1,3,1,6,16,4,1,10,0,15,1,0,1,1,43,34,17,5,10,15,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,5,12,0,0,5,3,0,6,7,10,0,1,3,2,21,6,29,28,5,23,0,3,1,1,17,8,0,12,9,108,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12361464757818487,0.0,0.0,0.14442888776570315,0.1538873350320878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18966254048839806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12414070433532988,0.13036759691536048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186622900314942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010869911899467,0.0,0.14472782890889205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235119450280096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21547855768892796,0.0,0.07285724456600441,0.0,0.15850611342394905,0.11696464610745998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484478824418527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347087681523528,0.14733733999757628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327693538000928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633229955754778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663209549996694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449541556494227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217629881380098,0.0,0.15307501215633645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343550394485826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337856364168575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089680813688292,0.0,0.28226314317415924,0.11112416754206396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735597570205067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457841685048906,0.0,0.4576093553442139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208520487083104,0.12188607411659655,0.0,0.0,0.16191303182145395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22141658667375136,0.0813148351290528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946778837717228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645032931011053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990617890675334,0.0,0.0,0.08980169035406202
mentalhealth,othellossorrow,2020/03/05,"rotting away I feel like I'm rotting away. My hair is falling. I see no future ahead of me, and like, I'm 18. I just graduated high school. It shouldn't be like this. All my friends are too busy to talk to me, my dad can't help me in any way and my mom only cares about herself. I spend my days sleeping and creating other lives for myself where everything is fine. I just want to sleep forever.
(Sorry for the kinda generic rant, I just have no one to talk to)",1.196517754868271,2.9730267731958837,2.9679725085910644,92.9800916380298,80.23711340206184,5.9605956471935855,22.117983963344788,6.937597516519254,0.4651887743413514,355,11,81,4,9,118,66,97,0.10099999999999999,0.7170000000000001,0.183,0.8186,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,1,0,7,3,3,0,1,11,13,3,0,2,3,2,2,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,4,0,0,1,0,3,16,6,13,11,1,10,0,0,1,0,7,5,0,1,6,52,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13600046223874904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37579549366609066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20390373978073545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289773886519936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797386508805789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112125363093884,0.14287332068031292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545122372228574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340494798814612,0.21130104334887206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29311590769222073,0.0,0.17659535895278816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342265671996616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13551880263948035,0.152101859048701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20240115863573024,0.15936661095754304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40027005065777455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238730970865091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214897287214264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795963422157843,0.15874322512872285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,betsybunny,2020/03/05,"Feeling lost I am in a stage in my life where I feel lost 
My lifestyle, I'm too busy to do anything but work and too tired always sleeping. I have been trying to eat well but for some reason I am still very run down.
I feel very depressed this week and up and down. Kind of like one minute I'm happy , then I'm sad and the next I'm angry like up and down like crazy but I am struggling to keep a constant flow of chill vibes if you get me 
I have ADD and think I need to go back on my meds but I keep forgetting everything it's like I'm not with it. My brain feels like scrambled eggs. I feel like a zombie living through life waiting for the shit part to be over but it never ends",0.29035794183445063,2.13551700671141,1.7470872483221491,100.2291767337808,83.63087248322148,4.510246085011187,17.987024608501123,5.2151,-0.7628714988814314,530,12,130,2,15,170,89,149,0.158,0.6459999999999999,0.196,0.7587,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,3,6,15,1,1,5,0,8,8,3,1,1,29,27,13,0,2,7,0,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,8,2,3,7,0,0,3,2,6,1,1,3,5,16,9,20,23,2,22,0,4,0,0,1,10,1,2,14,77,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201569279359024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078184647218367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035154579227852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15028187517000854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454777832015968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594911487378146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775118204217393,0.0,0.0,0.11923450014347915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209889298656492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34034283120354025,0.19234694475311187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703340647391531,0.0,0.07650837819574549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330686037126442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393151658558215,0.0,0.14018735147923114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19017398859955012,0.3946149570449694,0.0,0.11887306038106395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29391006876793274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495338986207913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981997650139723,0.10382823356305168,0.0,0.14317126305956346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122286624326996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578173210914966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13841310136626475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381868137367994,0.0,0.0,0.13471850614515238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750873151035284,0.0,0.0,0.14073539572687824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862598831869332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472736267013915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913990152418354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22215331639787594,0.0,0.0,0.10798507400561122,0.0,0.1210407019193153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980058982756944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,redditaaronm,2020/03/05,"Want advice on meds Hey guys, so I have been seeing a therapist for quite some time now and from what I have been describing to her she believes I have bipolar disorder and possibly social anxiety, I want to get on meds but I am unclear of possible side effects, what are some side effects of medication like that?",8.273500000000002,7.317208683333334,8.533333333333335,69.50500000000004,62.16666666666666,12.666666666666664,40.0,11.855464076750405,4.867999999999999,251,12,45,7,3,83,43,60,0.096,0.81,0.094,-0.0387,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,2,0,10,11,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,1,8,9,2,6,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,3,3,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20585414745067546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16115403651137505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373412588581105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24143418092471725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006095939832514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20858614859239746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029176519381059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4679907070866199,0.2122174096539635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47497414995648296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22406244177538706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16786844691799627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21474095867821355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445920611946368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283732140751465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485050096355086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FriendlessFellow2,2020/03/05,"Am I justified in feeling like people don't have enough empathy for me and expect me to be able to function like a normal person despite my mental illnesses? Like people are always trying to get me off my ass and tell me I am being lazy and looking for excuses. I feel like that is kinda a dick thing to tell someone. You think I don't try? Or that I don't want to try? I DON'T HAVE THE FUCKING KNOWLEDGE TO JUST FIGURE OUT LIFE LIKE SO MANY PEOPLE DO. You guys should be fucking glad you had normal parents who didn't watch your every move and shelter you from a young age. Oh YoU'rE jUsT bLaMiNg YoUr PaReNtS fOr YoUr PrObLeMs. GODDAMN RIGHT I AM. I HATE MY FUCKING PARENTS FOR PUTTING ME THROUGH THIS LIFE OF SHIT. I HATE MYSELF FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO FIX MY LIFE AND I HATE MY PARENTS FOR BREAKING IT. I JUST WANT TO DIE I CAN'T STAND NORMAL PEOPLE WITH FRIENDS WHO CAN SOCIALIZE IN THE REAL WORLD WITHOUT HAVING AN ANXIETY ATTACK LIKE ME. I MIGHT AS WELL JUST DRINK OR OD BECAUSE I HAVE NOTHING LEFT TO LOSE

sorry for caps I'm just super angry and miserable rn",0.5053233308327094,2.987608618604653,2.1529782445611443,91.9796699174794,93.04651162790695,4.076519129782446,21.35408852213053,5.843745405466311,0.3055896474118533,843,31,163,7,31,274,122,215,0.21,0.621,0.17,-0.9366,4,0,1,0,0,1,12.0,0,7,0,2,7,21,8,1,6,0,24,11,3,0,0,33,38,10,2,8,9,4,2,6,1,2,4,0,0,2,7,8,1,0,5,1,0,2,8,11,1,0,2,4,33,10,26,30,1,13,0,2,2,5,20,7,6,4,8,113,40,0,0.191043869805975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948190194194686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307401874575213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866999094640988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05822928491431579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913668746070577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357513062450544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869969337751128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048134998303742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965975207999152,0.13648177876175865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380000995364354,0.2649254687935778,0.04990626846433964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458173349116962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829244042483046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378486176550536,0.0,0.20240990262361655,0.2800031543657835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021436750445389,0.10686461159176958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684424923110334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626364338334893,0.10133367772586756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152469974938506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807736449333824,0.0916558727802473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4242632178036495,0.0,0.0,0.26489152931387433,0.08340606910450138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914015911830654,0.0,0.09602592791295617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872487433253013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157521048416619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805189349082752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737258327268113,0.08093542546290619,0.0,0.0,0.1069289856278986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698076280984064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346052907789343,0.061206598879152176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194559370723932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268262418755301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588569120099168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207973653828384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shoot_Everything,2020/03/05,"Life can be horrific but keep going for the things that matter. I currently engage in a lot of self destructive behaviour like smoking, drinking, not sleeping and drug use. They are what i use as a distraction from the pain and depression of day to day  existance.

Im seeking professional help for myself to hopefully allow me to have a brighter future.

It would be nice if my family understood what im going through but first i think i need to understand what im going through.

I really dont enjoy being alive but the people around me who care about me are the reason i still am. Surround yourself with people that genuinly care about you, life can be utterly horrific at times but the thought of them can be that boost that keeps me going.

Be good to yourself. You only get one body and one life, treat it better than i have and try and enjoy it while you have the chance.",5.6492146315223275,6.488641065088757,6.181699838622914,78.10718128025822,67.34319526627219,9.932436793975256,30.15653577192039,10.018931242160765,2.9483562130177523,696,25,129,16,11,226,101,169,0.172,0.599,0.228,0.8502,1,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,2,2,4,15,1,1,9,0,17,8,2,4,0,28,34,12,0,4,6,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,1,12,7,1,2,5,1,0,4,2,4,0,3,2,0,18,11,21,25,1,16,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,3,9,94,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646441583102007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157064946300738,0.0,0.14532011383354215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667751776968216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16874612409516204,0.0,0.11268173121792445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332912394407294,0.12816136770828893,0.15171863049609774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123332739459224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128199938881753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835208864706427,0.0,0.2974096530933233,0.10973209194134162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08769106896714697,0.0,0.0,0.12994145431747528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4239491921646201,0.0,0.0,0.2325713932762101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772224819224652,0.06391581998810172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122505668676494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970071032845234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17730450993338553,0.09950038316945027,0.1392099276151628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18139894897627806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381159318375007,0.13451269466067747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648185373452495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092221114454544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447919331524697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691612982888577,0.08382912610191429,0.0,0.10386260316600272,0.07628670082392666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882344018127818,0.0,0.0,0.13619627969686648,0.0,0.22598630508199216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293626499622318,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MightyAllMan_,2020/03/05,"No spark Life has seem to lost its spark. I didn’t expect to be living some fantasy adventure like out of a book, and was quite content living the average students life. But ever since entering year 2 of uni, there’s no spark. I don’t look forewArd to anything. It’s not like I dread the day or waking up. But there’s nothing I’m excited about. My grades have been continuously declining. I can’t find any sort of meaning to what i do with my days. I can’t describe my feelings as depressed, I don’t think I’m depressed at least. I’m just unhappy. And I need to know how to break out of this self-repeating rut of boredom and unhappiness.",1.7653317674691706,3.929654893129772,3.6529770992366433,86.82066353493838,80.22137404580154,7.084204345273048,26.107457428068123,8.139509932561175,1.7451287140340581,505,21,105,10,13,170,86,131,0.18,0.703,0.11699999999999999,-0.8540000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,6,8,0,1,3,0,11,3,1,1,1,23,22,8,0,2,5,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,6,2,0,1,8,4,0,0,4,2,11,4,18,17,2,11,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,4,7,63,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412974380147956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17098513063859574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680016564410303,0.0,0.35792099852932285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18794878981874694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505974635448734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899070387305286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419038372144726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29352213670604965,0.20302150015532214,0.0,0.3669468673059075,0.0,0.17448276175657199,0.0,0.2268162749792315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263331933317113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406614229632398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19937039100904946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22099946996974207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18915499177496667,0.21675972157065845,0.0,0.0,0.17187765723127596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13313695217466126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338034252177819
mentalhealth,kittin-kithe,2020/03/05,"COVID-19 and Losing Marbles CW/TW: PTSD, Death, Medical Fears.

I have C-PTSD. Seven years next month. One of the hardest symptoms I’ve dealt with is the sense of foreshortened future. I feel like I’m living on borrowed time. I feel like I don’t deserve to be here. It’s not always bad. I have a lot of good days. But I haven’t planned for the future in seven years. I can’t. I don’t know how. For me, the future just...isn’t there.

My doctors tell me that I need to relax. It’s stupid advice for a person who is hyper-vigilant and gets little sleep, right? Ha. They say my body is physically manifesting my stress. My hair is going grey. I’ve developed arthritis. My immune system is shot. I’m now classified as immunocompromised.

My screwy immune system is why I’m writing this post. I have tried *so hard* to keep calm about COVID-19. I know I catastrophize things. I’ve kept up with the updates and I’m washing my hands a zillion times a day, sure, but I haven’t lost my marbles and I’m proud of that. I’m doing really well, considering. But fuck, I feel that creeping sense of doom again. I feel it like I felt it immediately after The Event. It’s so heavy. I’m so tired. I almost passed out from exhaustion on the job today. I’m scared. I’m so, so scared. And I feel like I’ll be laughed out of the room if I voice any of this, so I’m keeping my head down and my mouth shut and I’m scrambling to shove all my marbles into my pockets before I lose them again.

Thank you for letting me vent.",0.0803508077288555,2.424613308441561,2.0514444092492887,93.73479727589485,91.24025974025976,4.693189737092175,18.551156160912253,6.345904618129536,-0.045941495090275015,1161,34,252,13,41,384,166,308,0.139,0.733,0.128,-0.853,2,0,0,0,0,0,55.0,0,1,2,5,14,25,2,4,12,1,18,15,6,1,2,35,46,19,1,2,5,0,9,4,0,0,8,2,1,1,12,12,0,3,8,1,1,2,6,12,1,4,3,12,38,13,29,40,2,35,1,4,1,1,8,12,1,3,22,140,50,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026882897771867,0.0,0.0,0.11299591863227347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389437766461986,0.0,0.0,0.0767370784953807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421915341366624,0.0,0.0,0.09602104286002032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534308363950036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554874055857905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549954532394174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269796958319647,0.2852839413077288,0.322460116486784,0.10834693229680596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432149295256854,0.05895578621715901,0.0,0.06413125141364087,0.09464731629577247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108512246619313,0.0,0.11580942633749615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197922022077572,0.20060000526125785,0.0,0.0,0.12403107320506095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538956614828662,0.0,0.22051747027483334,0.11309828514820335,0.09964239605370244,0.0,0.0,0.2524848035747633,0.1231814146218886,0.09593504447062634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136774048083459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007016956302727,0.0,0.0,0.08367162080911568,0.0,0.0,0.1200097621072297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646530625381104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853011516683907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807235757618992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638147499706498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229008605390866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636726643589356,0.0,0.0897372464691595,0.22595096579727075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292444816383952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926122293048295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063531490161716,0.11728703634622535,0.0,0.0,0.09862971584050052,0.10389063141963444,0.0,0.0,0.07496784473512516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13159926825969662,0.1296963761351836,0.10696192632617983,0.0,0.0,0.07661295878520255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014593678382642,0.0,0.10182321468564252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533432577613442
mentalhealth,DOA_WOODS,2020/03/05,Anxiety about the corona virus Since I found out about the corona virus I have had beef bad anxiety about getting it. It doesn’t help that when I get anxious I start to feel like I can’t breathe which makes me even more anxious about think that I already have it. Thankfully I am in a state with no confirmed cases but I was wondering if anyone else has had anxiety about this issue and had and any ways that might help control it.,8.214767441860467,6.410817802325585,7.476395348837213,79.7543604651163,62.83720930232558,10.925581395348836,35.45348837209303,9.516144504307137,2.9929395348837207,345,12,70,5,4,107,58,86,0.13699999999999998,0.7559999999999999,0.107,0.1154,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,3,0,11,1,1,2,0,13,20,5,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,1,9,2,9,14,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,3,3,49,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060381071593176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696857357724953,0.0,0.4284957941589707,0.4218562204164021,0.0,0.13055132649389867,0.1913055116709036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15589427884343246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094101038902794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155971474239014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12331958319108735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440571833737076,0.13338500053903296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20471686377487286,0.0,0.0,0.1950955711864519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25029431472729224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19487576583655986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912166230414432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246297574315582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980688232629373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15444767629947675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215364432364352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17189663117269716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963563632533195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482009732015711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20247802744173615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ricksdetrix,2020/03/05,"The cycle of narcissistic inaction I'm convinced that I'm at the point in my life where I need to grit my teeth and work hard until I reach where I want to be. But every time I think about it, my mind immediately thinks ""it's pointless"" ""it won't matter in 50 years"" ""that industry probably won't even exist"" ""you won't make a difference"" and the like. 

I really don't want to keep floating through life, letting the current take me where ever and not taking control and steering myself where I want to go, but I also can't seem to convince myself to get started. I usually give up on things after trying for a short while, or give up before I even start. I've developed a system of forgetting in order to make day to day life bearable, I try to live in the moment to escape the existential dread but end up letting myself stagnate by not moving forward.

I can't even say I want help anymore - I tried a bunch of stuff and it didn't work and I just can't be arsed trying because it seems pointless. I feel the necessity to let everyone I tell know that I'm not at risk, I'd never hurt or endanger myself, I just exist. 

But I want to do the things I feel like will make a change, or that I'm passionate about. It just seems that I'm passionate about every single thing for a few days or weeks and then it's onto the next thing, endlessly.",6.439363920750786,5.2626315182481775,7.374244004171011,77.05175182481753,65.93430656934306,10.310323253388948,31.61522419186653,9.424239791934726,2.6060289885297188,1052,33,214,17,14,356,138,274,0.038,0.826,0.136,0.9686,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,3,15,9,0,2,15,0,15,6,1,5,2,46,46,19,0,6,14,0,3,2,0,4,3,1,0,0,17,7,0,2,8,0,0,3,12,3,0,0,1,4,28,6,35,36,3,41,0,1,0,2,6,18,0,7,22,146,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803779195082729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967904711015738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06127004605180032,0.0,0.08552672288106683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632639680209327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273066416183153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19446216832266208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501169970954538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890221475761883,0.0,0.0,0.19915799083756852,0.09091717239644707,0.1693682492246935,0.09604174228979387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016418895854491,0.07180446129700538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052512397697878015,0.19283696221772614,0.05712222659012815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003733972321253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06736982555035134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759817947158952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933802710792862,0.0,0.0,0.05523774222133206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083352717294873,0.21297984464927594,0.09820835104927944,0.0,0.08875229158793904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20127388891820824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148658521976857,0.0,0.0,0.10682636817871548,0.0,0.0745269923425348,0.0775196131967047,0.0,0.10689366998159697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501456634075252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836692641127713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438936688069845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992969439070069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27450195896613033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422831832776941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506005896994907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15114222737978392,0.0,0.08785028909575694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26709787316094713,0.12880567355474246,0.0,0.0,0.0586082686281911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27295913895343943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069771492486104,0.0,0.2964174119332049,0.0,0.08062316848383139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634515226946945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647252322799835
mentalhealth,IntrepidFinger,2020/03/05,"It's really hard dating and living with someone who is suicidal and incredibly depressed but won't do anything about it. I've been dating my partner for three years and today they turned the big 3-0. They kept talking about how hard today is and how they weren't supposed to be alive this long and it's just really hard to live with this lately. 

I've been feeling neglected and they don't actually talk to me about a lot of their problems and then act like I'm stupid for being really concerned and wanting them to go to therapy when they casually mention suicide like that. It's not always like this but when it's bad it's pretty bad and it's hard to live with and love someone with this disease.",3.8190909090909098,5.410372482269505,4.89136041263701,82.82454545454549,72.40425531914894,7.68046421663443,27.002578981302385,8.296473431620573,1.815150354609929,564,20,109,9,11,185,80,141,0.23399999999999999,0.611,0.155,-0.932,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,7,0,8,11,1,0,2,0,10,1,0,2,0,26,17,17,2,2,4,0,5,3,1,1,0,0,0,1,13,14,0,2,1,1,0,2,4,6,0,1,4,5,9,5,16,10,1,13,0,2,0,1,13,1,0,1,13,71,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.1318695637147228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244084082728717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120231152509154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256595356477821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638919194662806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832691590915257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679876060324622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4842077426968617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243504172462075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980563457966631,0.0,0.3579727052777168,0.11958777145264893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11488458982720375,0.12196211376072408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374780591293414,0.0,0.12930329439124766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25970750096705525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289942004259113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956254542005247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21722833599527672,0.0,0.0,0.15453548223927505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561791074558415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146985062370184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970449058659831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702072582932216
mentalhealth,MK6493,2020/03/05,"Commitment issues Hey guys,

So I'm not looking for any kind words. I'm 26 have done the whole university thing and dropped out with 2 years left on a 4 year degree. I work and currently doing a pre-apprenticeship in electrotechnology with hopes of becoming an electrician. But I've started to put a few things together about my self stemming from childhood from now I've always had issues committing to something and seeing it through til the end. Now not the case with relationships, I love my gf and am very committed to her but I'm at a stage in my life where I want to get something done and have something behind me, but I just dont commit, I've missed a few days already and its only a 2 day a week course for 6 months. I've had my bouts with depression in the past and suicide attempts but after that I was actually doing very good for my self got a job as a trade assistant and detailer working 6 days a week but i fell off again. If anyone has been through these issues and has found a way to get some structure and motivation in their lives Im all ears! I also have hyperprolactinemia which is suppressing dopamine and serotonin levels in my brain which is the happy hormones its absolutely killed my sex drive, I've also got a fsirly addictive personality I used to smoke weed ALOT like a half ounce a week. Yeah im not too sure what im trying to say anymore..ive got an opportunity in my hands right now and i dont trust my self to take it. I want to be a man I can be proud of and raise kids that grow to be happy and loving and all that but I'm not sure if I am good enough or if im just meant to be shit at life.",4.303417207792208,4.853861122023812,5.4675541125541125,83.06532467532469,70.22023809523809,8.728138528138528,27.475108225108233,8.841846274778883,1.8226773809523813,1291,41,278,22,22,430,183,336,0.096,0.74,0.165,0.9598,3,0,4,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,1,6,12,18,2,0,23,1,24,10,4,2,8,55,46,30,2,6,16,0,1,1,1,0,3,2,0,7,13,20,0,1,3,0,1,4,6,4,0,1,11,5,24,14,40,31,8,42,0,2,2,3,15,15,1,7,21,172,37,5,0.0,0.0,0.08528816437859096,0.09527708203162333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644623232848933,0.1397848285691875,0.07272241330903845,0.0,0.0,0.059433862572710563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06111094563728914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965245908248076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756544254124416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909408098935685,0.0,0.07527605502745069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788776747641298,0.20486038768791714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740898068727445,0.09030583969313263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582775961887492,0.0,0.0,0.09132404216060057,0.0,0.0,0.1466111480889237,0.2097012895508579,0.0,0.0,0.08653808912944695,0.0,0.18607429852071766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680626362255679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3776207834614304,0.2736634544870672,0.08672935842874842,0.0,0.09669330488626164,0.09101191324824316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495854311645867,0.0,0.12346405271133785,0.04269841020851863,0.0,0.07717432810304135,0.0,0.07339258679595599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577608132364467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976051453446909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647036957774857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343159693531517,0.0,0.07631285212990968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785946294000924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383310033356952,0.0,0.07463769773569702,0.0,0.06950266128026407,0.0,0.0,0.06964515486499986,0.0,0.27352656249394675,0.0,0.08971313154259826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20185051691718467,0.0,0.0,0.061860989014226965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559958955690008,0.0,0.16474378662155226,0.0,0.06571266858205292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612713615694778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05933773024734796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548409734627984,0.0,0.1442255534930225,0.10309960089907684,0.06937272764622443,0.2103170097116747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975771161690389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127254052773871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256332029628002
mentalhealth,SourPatchKidIcarus,2020/03/05,"Closure Does Not Exist Closure does not exist. Life is not fair. The further you can put the concepts of closure and fairness away from your life, the happier you will be. I like these sorts of statements, even though they aren't the happiest to admit. They are true, though. Sometimes we expect reality to follow a narrative, like a movie or a song might. But, life is a constantly growing bubble of information that never forgets that time in elementary school when that thing happened, or your first big rejection, or that career failure. The only thing you can control is what you put into that bubble, and how much you put into it. You can fill your life with more things, and effectively ""move on"", but you will never have closure. And things will never become fair. Just for my own sanity, I need to admit this. Because it's a good goal to have more things in your life. It's a good goal to say I want to do ""this"" by ""this date"" and to do your best to meet that goal. But it's no help to anyone to seek closure, happiness, or fairness. Or even health in general. We can add pieces to our lives, bit by bit, and increase the positive turns that the story takes. But there will always be dark paths that we go down until we find the light again.",4.752301684159144,5.948700842323652,5.0682841103246306,83.97534293385407,69.62240663900414,7.828264583841835,26.62460336831829,8.124751697461798,1.5755963387844765,977,30,190,13,17,309,128,241,0.05,0.777,0.17300000000000001,0.9856,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,5,12,2,7,9,8,0,0,14,0,20,6,0,3,4,46,29,20,0,3,13,0,0,2,0,5,6,2,0,0,22,14,0,1,6,1,0,9,8,1,0,1,0,3,23,7,28,22,9,29,0,1,0,0,25,10,0,7,12,145,45,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452131700978908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942925437311191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672757093117524,0.0,0.0,0.06924732000826296,0.12545831516647246,0.0,0.0,0.1192124288357834,0.0,0.248035727173804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275736837353513,0.1274080383317909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19881797594997788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15005872104913145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382506501966547,0.0966250522725218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455946027732558,0.19055856612998198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045293431914028,0.12092549571415916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074767676760388,0.0,0.0,0.07614128223180848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40118253557020106,0.11099494044518438,0.0,0.10030771532080633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050784445357625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073501130287904,0.08350643534045794,0.08423030208976365,0.2628376739301265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639519219359204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425873167975688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033642835776648,0.0,0.11496563625130107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234975874396193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541036657032193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773420514623366,0.0,0.2232158012708408,0.0,0.06623898290194506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356027911011645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700210854356498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunkenseas,2020/03/05,"Just another vet There is a lot going on in my head and in my life that has brought me here to vent. Broadly, I have been diagnosed with non-combat service connected depression and anxiety in addition to PTSD from childhood abuse. I have been evaluated several times by the VA and I’ve been essentially told the same thing again and again ... “you should seek therapy” but I still can’t afford that kind of treatment so here I am fucked up, but trying! I have a list of other service connected disabilities which further complicate life, including limited mobility in one of my legs, chronic back pain, and syncope (and related memory loss)... all of which prevent me from having a normal sleep cycle. The days sort of blend together and I have a hard time keeping track of the dates so I end up just sort of winging it one day at a time. 



Well after I left the navy, I went to college. I worked 3 jobs to ensure I wouldn’t go into debt paying bills, even though I was using the GI bill and part of VocRehab benefits to finish the last part of my bachelors degree. My grades were never great, I focused on the experiences that would bring me the opportunities I needed in my career of choice after I graduated. Now the only thing that is stopping me from graduating, is one class of Organic chemistry. I’ve taken it 3 times, the final is coming up and I’m sure to fail it again. I can rationally work through the problems with all of my notes, but the tests you have to reproduce full reactions and I just ... can’t. The second I begin to try I start crying and it blooms into full panic until I can’t breathe. I’m actually crying now as I type this out. I have tried to force myself through it day after day, trying to absorb and cram the information in there but I can never reproduce the information properly. No matter how I practice. I’ve tried reaching out to the professor for help but he just asked me to “stick to it”. So here I am failing the class with the final in a few weeks, utterly unable to prepare myself. I’ve been prescribed some different medication, so far they have little or no impact on my ability to control my response to the situation. 



The kicker? I already have a full time permanent job that I love in a community that I love. It’s not perfect, but it works for me, it’s interesting and I get by. I’m even trying to buy my first home! But everyone I know is under the impression I already have my degree... organic chemistry is in no way related to field that I currently work in! Not even close! But I still feel like shit because I can’t get through this notoriously difficult course. I am good at my job, really and it’s probably because I enjoy it so much and yet when I’m recognized for it even in the slightest way I cringe inside. Must my degree depend on my ability to memorize complicated and lengthy reactions? 



I feel helpless because there’s no other option but to take the final and fail again, like really there’s no amount of studying no amount of time or repetition that can fix my brain. I’m sorry but I don’t have the capacity. And part of me is like fuck it, it’s organic chemistry? Who is really going to fire you because you didn’t pass one class? Who is really going to notice or care? And the other part is like yea... you reaaaaalllllllllyyyyyyyyyyyyyy fucked up here, why can’t you just push through and pass like everyone else? Just read more! Study harder!.... .... I feel so dumb for being stuck with these issues in my head, I just want to be done with it but it has driven me so far into the ground it’s hard to pull myself out alone. 



There are many other things that swirl around my mind but I had to get this part out tonight. Maybe I’lol have energy for the rest another day.",3.266835133744857,5.32272943072703,4.893221664951992,80.26857735339509,74.99451303155007,8.232518861454048,25.79391718106996,8.974205444408168,2.15510920781893,2941,105,562,67,64,991,317,729,0.157,0.743,0.1,-0.9939,7,1,0,0,1,0,85.0,0,6,1,14,43,34,5,1,36,1,52,18,7,4,7,97,90,47,0,8,24,0,6,5,0,4,6,0,1,0,41,36,0,5,7,1,5,13,18,15,1,6,15,6,77,19,95,69,19,101,0,6,0,5,17,42,5,9,49,410,118,25,0.0,0.07513437174482547,0.061882217396285515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06567703744754604,0.1399562708258357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329887140906886,0.048510988445996966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056451266872750226,0.059282860077455576,0.0,0.0,0.04876090088210957,0.0,0.15462459660390554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079019661979763,0.0,0.0,0.0646540689863551,0.0,0.0,0.05462492889511123,0.0,0.0,0.0711233897889382,0.0,0.0,0.13931302892983904,0.20448160962013354,0.0,0.05461776831385021,0.06436314809684403,0.0,0.06625338461697554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489380582726298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05297366150044522,0.0,0.05616534728137765,0.0,0.0,0.16753550322489927,0.0,0.0,0.12118822014708835,0.0,0.062030359494918176,0.0,0.0,0.09619098475494156,0.04530246253211349,0.0,0.20839845796638665,0.0,0.05393930670416984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17587367680448904,0.09939247030931106,0.0,0.1441569219019042,0.053188053728561634,0.0,0.06991336912660355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361169307935802,0.0,0.1301606475785045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04250458735656719,0.0,0.06360869393492398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06618699287439142,0.18878369766891373,0.05636464019985156,0.0,0.06603517665451608,0.034850282310311016,0.05169028985805328,0.0,0.0,0.06889871826391777,0.0,0.08958135523464628,0.15490263638870092,0.06355676951549774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053911706104904485,0.11446592868357235,0.0,0.0,0.06429111654385923,0.06370716678196807,0.0,0.0,0.06388221189257128,0.0,0.0,0.06402933942243016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046616059931300184,0.04702014634248915,0.09781646735908613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06213155409217884,0.0,0.07219644377096808,0.0,0.0,0.1718819286830758,0.0482286597512258,0.0674762048052679,0.0744018252441383,0.0,0.34335203323444063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837024517405471,0.060677948331467335,0.07412673515209177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343044421592209,0.0,0.1624966932633198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163896068569005,0.06509282442493508,0.0,0.07127918776961631,0.06345907999585555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098597935861717,0.04488424857562712,0.0,0.1012838605234776,0.053016344616002166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059766269403737124,0.0,0.04767889744740969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251861641143019,0.0,0.12638690381539336,0.0,0.06230322924952698,0.0,0.221860774022246,0.0,0.0,0.06059411007354418,0.0,0.2583207423718642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05476871680823058,0.0,0.0,0.03740279769644369,0.10066902588079572,0.050866311138405125,0.0,0.05701615765822333,0.05878474928257465,0.057220625216572785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18466250307264906,0.0,0.0,0.045046977310824826,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Legend7Ali,2020/03/05,"How did know you needed help with your mental health? Over the last 4 years I have slowly deteriorated my mental health. My physical, mental, and emotional health are all in the gutter, and have only become worse due to events I have dealt with. At this moment in life I have no motivation for anything. I’m supposed to be going to college next fall, but honestly I don’t care where I end up, or where I go. I don’t study for anything for my classes, I don’t have motivation to go to the gym, and I don’t care to work on my social life. I have dug up a hole and just keep digging myself deeper into it, making it harder and harder to get out. What do I do?",4.732499999999998,4.508209014705884,6.310588235294119,80.09764705882355,69.14705882352942,8.564705882352943,25.823529411764717,8.07648339933343,1.392767647058823,510,12,107,6,8,176,80,136,0.027000000000000003,0.816,0.157,0.9536,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,3,4,3,0,0,4,0,15,5,0,4,1,20,26,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,3,1,0,4,5,0,0,0,1,0,18,3,21,24,1,22,0,0,0,0,4,11,0,1,7,75,22,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522985415241619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16930301830367225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31259029443431824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17243699023506476,0.13577445873821825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009065798343579,0.0,0.2613643775744302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4888383708035334,0.0,0.0,0.10275085300047077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625623067493567,0.0,0.0,0.08424728852563268,0.12495642717811127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165545235407617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232604683240144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.463457924767362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11366679328910728,0.0,0.0,0.16303167896361911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658826109606416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15626562561832116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160106995477702,0.0,0.15622137917913995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871738234577078
mentalhealth,pinkcheeto123,2020/03/05,"Is talking about mental health, insecurities, ect embarrassing? I really have trouble with this I feel weird when I tell people about things I don't like about myself or things I'm struggling with. And I don't know if it's because I'm afraid they'll use them aganist me or see me as week or if I'll end up talking to them about everything If they let me confied without judgement. It's made it really hard for me to open up or talk to people in everyday life. If it's not embarrassing I just want to know why and how to be okay with it",5.860208333333333,5.031095080357146,6.756071428571433,79.87226190476193,66.94642857142857,9.966666666666667,31.16666666666667,9.2995712137729,2.39062023809524,427,14,92,7,6,143,66,112,0.187,0.795,0.017,-0.9393,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,4,0,7,9,0,5,0,1,7,2,0,3,0,24,16,13,0,5,11,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,1,3,15,2,18,12,0,8,0,0,1,0,8,4,0,8,5,61,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916041513682757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313380265100736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17568131271661536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09883858866414078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751081885945201,0.0,0.0,0.20778195154293705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148571028900538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998875543499648,0.13807054909413366,0.09549974771556073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18496421055856815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969939305458182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710370275516657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25045398795407225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15576914191272875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043540602801053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47134884976032304,0.17085472580990696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597312675521237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16882858677647825,0.0,0.0,0.11529686734650944,0.0,0.15679913506279233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638677428952898,0.0,0.0,0.18843198311188705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TyeDillingerKiller,2020/03/05,"Hello outer world. Today I was told by Doctor. S. that I judge all you not-me people very bad and this attitude doesn't allow me to have fun and interact Let me introduce my self, I'm OP's unconscious. OP is rather sleepy right now and I'm just waiting for him to reach Morpheus' hugs and confuse his conscious mind with some Freudian experience he will forget with a brush of his teeth. During his wake time though, I like to take a step back. I never sleep, don't dare you think it. I still work on my machinations, but  in absolute silence. OP doesn't even notice I exist, so sweet!

Well sometimes he does notice me. Sometimes, you know, Doctor S. stops talking to OP's overationalized invectives, he changes his interlocutor, and through the hole of the pupils I can hear Doctor's accusations directed towards me. So gross. This time he touched a sensitive point. I blow my chest and try my voice. So many days since last time I spoke. The shout in response comes out angry, and flebile. Cuts the air almost unnoticed. But Doctor S. is ready.

""Finally you told it""
""Told what?""
""That you pass 90% of your time judging people""
""Yeah that's what I do indeed. Is this bad?""

Of course is not, my dear loved OP.

""Yeah know I see the picture. I can't relate with others because I feel like they are only good at hurting and facestepping."" 

Exactly! You are different from them. You are better than them. You have a moral framework my dear. You'd like to live in a world where love and respect rule upon any action people do. Some sort of a Christian paradise without a God but only good smiling spirits. For sure I can tell you, you'd be the King of that word! 

Sad truth is, this world doesn't exists. Those people around you, yeah your friends. Not only them, your parents and relatives. Ow and that guy who asked you infos on the street. And that other girl who tried with you. And that bearded man -do you remember him? Probably not, he's just one of the many- who was dancing beside you in the club. All those people, all the people, they are bad. Yeah bad like a villain in a movie. 

""It is possible. Some of them maybe. "" 

Some of them are so good at being bad that they actually seem good. Just to trick people. I almost admire their skill. Stay away from them please. And never trust them. They want to be trusted by the people that they lie to, so when you turn your back, they can put the stab in. Even when they are smiling, they are showing their theeths. 

""Agree."" 

Some others are just violent. I'm referring to men mostly, they could beat you in a blink of the eye. That's funny cause it's literal. Watch them in the eyes if you want your orbit broken. Love the drunk ones expecially. Not that I discriminate the junkies. They are so innocuous, and can be so good at putting themselves on a car, and a cradle on a tree. 

""That's sad!"" 

 And than the other type, the aggressive authoritaristic ones. Those are the type of people who would explain you something you already know just to boss you. I guess that it makes them dick hard, or pussy wet whatever. Girls call it mansplaining, they should create a genderless term for it tho. 

""Don't get distracted, focus on the test."" 

Give yourself just a moment, you already answered all the questions after all. Did you see them? Yeah those three girls who are taking the exam as a group work over there on the last desks? God they are so loud. They aren't even good at cheating. I guess their parents will be proud of their 30/30. I can see their mums reporting it to their coworkers. Subtly, in the middle of a chat about auburgines, they'll say how good their daughters were in the Contemporary Philosophy class. In case that bitch of a know nothing thinks his dislexic son is better than Sonia. 

""I need to sleep, please!"" 

Wait! Wait! Just a second. Want to forget that sweet girl? You know who I'm referring to. Yeah she went out with you only to make your best friend jealous. It's OK to be used when the person you love is doing it after all. It happens sometimes, in love. I mean, maybe always. Yeah actually is always like this. It's not a problem by the way, your friend knows that you like her. You talked about it with him."" She's yours"" he said ""I don't like her"". When they broke one year later and he called her bitch, you cried for her for the second time. 

""I must stop surfing reddit now."" 

No you won't. Here is full of redditors who want to give a real help to you. They maybe can't help themselves, and they are just proiecting their problems on you, and they are using you as a catharsis. But they want... ok never mind they don't want to help you they are just desperate individuals. 

""OK!"" 

Last type before I make you dream a tree producing potatoes. The ""be egoistic"" ""YOLO"" type. They are cute aren't they? Each one of them thinks and acts like he is the only mortal soul walking on the earthly ground. Like he he is the only one with feelings. Like he is the only one with some sort of privileges that come from the revelation that he is going to die in 50 years. The sort of privilege that allows you to molest a girl and get her drunk to fuck her without protections, make a tape of the act and post it on any Whatsapp group. And tell you ""relax man, it was fun."" 

""They aren't all like this. I like people, I'm in love with nice people. "" 

There aren't nice people beside you. Some of them are innocuous. They are losers so big they couldn't even hurt a fly. They are just egoistic people like all the others, and they are so overcharged with frustrations about their shortcomings that when they become skilled in something, their tongue curls in pleasure at the idea of hurting you with their renewed self confidence. 

""So you telling me everybody is a egoistic piece of shit?"" 

Yes and that's why you don't want to have anything to do with them. You are scared, and you are right to be so. They will hurt you, with their multiple ways. Watch them from the distance like a birdwatcher and laugh on how much miserable their lives are. You are not of that blood, you are good in any sense. When you offer a hand, you are really offering it. When you swear something, you do it. When you love someone, you really love him. You don't care about yourself, you are selfless. And most of all you won't ever do anything that could possibly hurt anyone. Therefore, just don't move, stay there on the side. Don't talk with her. You don't want to ruin her night at the party. Just stay there and wait, wait till this violence of a party ends.",1.9363340040241432,4.496157669841273,2.564372904091215,92.48151911468815,82.61904761904762,5.5810418063939204,20.301810865191147,6.964324142778635,0.4006532528504354,5064,144,1030,64,142,1569,469,1260,0.121,0.6629999999999999,0.215,0.9993,3,0,3,0,0,0,223.0,0,65,57,12,59,98,13,4,71,11,103,27,11,14,17,176,176,63,2,19,27,5,6,14,3,9,4,7,0,12,65,50,2,8,22,8,0,15,33,35,1,10,11,23,177,63,133,142,24,117,4,11,7,11,218,56,5,21,54,679,242,17,0.0,0.0,0.07635731359657429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835258429512035,0.0,0.08634697745896293,0.0,0.06510737051261736,0.0,0.0,0.07981547233051965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027355892076046467,0.0,0.06439021662462174,0.03482799476885932,0.03657496554177957,0.0,0.03675758931611179,0.06016674186161605,0.16333143376805673,0.023849175315219292,0.043208565368308936,0.033291011506703536,0.0,0.04105744619024168,0.06920268583231794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989844255170198,0.0,0.039888769573906684,0.04019036358249718,0.041387220042642434,0.06740244615224382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06247347701138343,0.0,0.0429750624883186,0.025231265212280564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04060376566361025,0.040875478278647744,0.0,0.16017725189691026,0.034237027250168514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03465159472357628,0.0,0.0,0.10336217330724956,0.03538922725492502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038270054078136634,0.0,0.0,0.0395637901437861,0.055899327525863414,0.0,0.0428576174694333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067959764091094,0.03616882215436205,0.04088057573387157,0.07506118920323117,0.02223464945973577,0.26251786500378393,0.0,0.0,0.08619736029199515,0.038738176966581384,0.034596568375779964,0.0,0.035046755116838336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044094755837015776,0.0,0.07867048667538215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094112875031018,0.04416539686299062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12900671859848198,0.0956720324187861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040006182603079934,0.0,0.2675910714558425,0.0,0.0690931082349342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28248214690313544,0.0,0.1044603156574098,0.07932968716967848,0.11791371536919072,0.04261669799456128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900667680265552,0.0,0.0,0.0415818323496672,0.028760096652779663,0.029009400524857162,0.09052280672026072,0.0,0.0,0.03671452791636847,0.0,0.03753982178936464,0.08908417845266407,0.0,0.0,0.18557652782933812,0.2082850079020855,0.0,0.0,0.08688349750548535,0.0,0.0,0.35260083868645353,0.034160920357404354,0.0,0.08589117890330353,0.03698412513423528,0.08821119139373393,0.03746926707378562,0.0,0.04218148986160385,0.07487134954250511,0.0,0.07865936162440029,0.0438270034133263,0.0,0.0,0.04453083346115767,0.05012672253830077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04431902537334016,0.06682209816162413,0.03721517806719493,0.03111238553344793,0.039169206968901096,0.0,0.093528515402842,0.035616345265023205,0.08162818237644398,0.0,0.0401594627392898,0.03236316380471327,0.0,0.07830302590424776,0.0,0.03314901005425466,0.09035698758540174,0.11608170941146663,0.0,0.0,0.1251005644656965,0.03124388485765173,0.06541759203074587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036873208228252886,0.0,0.05883164303917295,0.0943373799063468,0.10258635733843273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520581315390641,0.03843840293747253,0.0,0.11406543356059105,0.0,0.03708427459275853,0.11215185055574653,0.0,0.053124248946117766,0.042554870833166766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757986802294283,0.0,0.03228078566628941,0.1846072925801788,0.06210844328198696,0.0,0.0,0.03517650799825738,0.03626765268381429,0.03530265565529135,0.0,0.0,0.07542685035243622,0.0,0.056964396436984324,0.0,0.0,0.027792040410197748,0.0,0.0,0.050388191667378734
mentalhealth,ladybluebirdd,2020/03/05,"I think I have a mental illness- but my family thinks it’s just teenage hormones. So to preface, I have been diagnosed with generalized anxiety, agoraphobia and depression since I was roughly 12 (Currently 17).  I have always been an antisocial individual, but I’ve never really considered that something I wanted to fix necessarily?  The only issue I really have is anger.  I am for the most part a really easygoing person, but there are always times when EVERYTHING and I mean everything pisses me off.  I get super overwhelmed and just lash out at everyone and just start crying, screaming, the whole deal.   It usually stems from not understanding someone or not doing something in a specific way.  I was tested for ADHD and Aspergers six months ago, but the doctor said if I had it, it would likely be high-functioning and I would have to go to another doctor.  
Anyways, my parents believed I shouldn’t get that secondary test because it’s likely just teenage hormones.  I’ve voiced that I don’t believe it’s simply that, as I’ve always dealt with worse than average anger issues and overwhelming “episodes” (basically just a complete shutdown).  I have coped with my anxiety for quite some time, and feel comfortable where I am on that healing journey, but I hate feeling out of control when it comes to fixing this.   I am so frustrated with myself, and I just want to have some type of help with this.  I want to seek a doctor, I want someone to listen.  I just don’t know how to convince my parents.  


TLDR; I think I have ADHD or Aspergers because of my anger outbursts and episodes where I get overwhelmed and shut down, but my parents believe it’s just me being a moody teen.  How to get them to take me seriously?",6.39884933153072,7.557756678233442,7.010707525912576,71.68557308096743,65.81388012618297,10.075950127685143,34.6535977166892,10.181067101454742,3.797346522457562,1365,62,227,32,21,449,165,317,0.17600000000000002,0.74,0.085,-0.9895,4,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,1,3,18,18,6,3,11,0,26,7,1,3,1,61,49,27,0,8,19,3,3,2,0,3,6,4,0,1,15,19,0,1,8,0,0,3,6,13,0,1,6,7,37,5,32,38,5,24,0,4,0,0,9,10,1,6,12,168,52,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22688311112485926,0.0,0.08367333987398763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356266012584039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989788657798108,0.14442015315579249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508169921154933,0.0,0.0,0.31904439097363985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813108622383391,0.09896883964359708,0.0,0.10586932131585107,0.0,0.0,0.103685832937841,0.0,0.09731462036577498,0.08130020349610845,0.09580649666706803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898444612815844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019616933699394,0.1696679552847177,0.0,0.0889849375527914,0.0,0.09545546411599656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19726493927016994,0.0,0.05364548684345191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931931451022204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326936651365772,0.09973095880849413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970426897914451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05187570146484042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09223090762785001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282120776037497,0.0,0.0,0.09512553407750003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534326852778543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280138814777902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178982175888222,0.0,0.0,0.31443541739553404,0.10221798156364403,0.0,0.0,0.08241997279569982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039814347243536,0.0,0.0,0.1814109396667143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978897324177339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808252975798688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15995707833930534,0.145336062002518,0.0,0.0,0.06681156436124552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07097148390739949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18144888982418586,0.0,0.0,0.1100821621037608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826602001129696,0.0,0.0,0.10396010737137656,0.0,0.22270079191599154,0.07492444805537997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053859610232412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961941181793286,0.13410758203117315,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dinosaursgorawr648,2020/03/05,"What to Disclose to HR or Your Boss When You Struggle With Mental Health Stuff I work at a call center(again) as I have a plethora of physical problems but my mental health takes a beating with it. I've been talking with HR and they said as long as I have a doctors note, I can take extra days off for mental health days, i.e if my agoraphobia or anxiety is too much, I don't have to worry about losing my job as well. 

We're trying out new meds and different doses to see if anything helps but I'm curious as to what do I actually disclose to HR?  I don't want to be known as the person who needed special treatment and this is one of the better places I've worked at. So far, all I've told them is that I'm working with my doctors to find a better alternative and might need to work 32 hours than the 40( but only sometimes. Most weeks, I can go in and make it up).

Anyone dealt with this before?",4.7765775401069535,4.5632343582887716,5.8688770053475965,83.26449197860964,69.05347593582889,8.511229946524066,28.764705882352942,8.00094639256281,1.6980951871657757,703,22,150,8,11,235,114,187,0.075,0.8009999999999999,0.124,0.9088,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,2,8,5,7,0,1,8,0,14,6,0,2,1,29,26,20,0,6,7,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,1,9,11,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,1,1,3,2,16,4,31,21,4,16,0,1,1,0,11,8,0,6,7,99,25,8,0.0,0.0,0.1164300048119539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127233728601164,0.0,0.0,0.08342479576683998,0.0,0.0981825168844574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152459397403953,0.0,0.0,0.21104118688686804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12182953554274382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15389102584715908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246542579488388,0.0,0.2442390562304893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904779244253564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780700424498139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3804649944089525,0.0,0.0,0.07997142828227558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749697832396765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839743172772085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558618997029587,0.0,0.13347812314906546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964079982507465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252725959772665,0.0,0.3607112847249605,0.12656976816900525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770707176439023,0.17693470257720273,0.0,0.11523099020372933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084799893119081,0.09074114217578706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417747650493048,0.1246542579488388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416419956270495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349177065955925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950751581434748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800130508138824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472941918931213,0.13658217427314825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17941355345045484,0.0958973985078827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140064597598322,0.0,0.08100411432894394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037252540402464,0.0,0.09570382413229983,0.0,0.10727462249768274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3474383599354753,0.12116577859339744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon_trash_acct,2020/03/05,"How do I fix the damage I've done? I've struggled with depression for most of my life, but for about the past 3 years specifically I've really struggled. During this time several things happened -- I had to put my childhood pet to sleep due to illness; my mom almost died several times from health complications; I got married without my mom present because she was in the hospital; while hopped up on opiates in the hospital, my mom told me I was a total failure, among other terrible things; my family pushed me away; etc. For a while I tried to keep going and keep doing work (I'm a freelance contractor). But I reached a point at which I couldn't bring myself to do work, to email anyone, or even to get dressed or do the dishes. I ended up ghosting several clients, and I feel very ashamed about it and concerned about the impact this probably had on my career. 

Thankfully for the last 4-5 months I have been doing a lot better. I'm taking care of myself, working, socializing, exercising, eating properly, working on cognitive behavioral therapy, etc. Is there an appropriate way to apologize to the clients I ghosted and repair some of the damage I did to my career as a result? Eg, would it be appropriate for me to send each person an email that says something along the lines of ""I apologize that I did not get back to you, I was struggling with some personal issues and I did not handle the situation professionally. I want to genuinely apologize for the inconvenience I caused, etc."" or is there a better way to approach that? Or should I cut my losses? Also, it's been almost 2 years since my wedding and I haven't sent out thank you cards yet. Is it too late? Should I apologize to people for not sending them?",7.805445223961144,7.1514079327217175,8.150296815974098,70.88915812196439,62.94495412844037,11.486166576722429,36.360676380644,10.843485225782073,3.946706925706063,1362,56,245,31,17,450,179,327,0.15,0.769,0.081,-0.981,0,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,2,1,7,12,15,1,4,21,0,26,7,1,3,1,39,44,17,3,5,10,3,1,0,0,3,4,1,1,2,13,11,2,2,1,1,0,8,6,10,0,0,14,2,40,5,46,25,9,38,0,4,0,0,22,12,0,10,16,180,53,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18808573826642527,0.0,0.0,0.07510424089285794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566794450173981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08823676188362196,0.07221527001268457,0.0,0.05725005482030779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612136500520794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09575317446568003,0.09647715226772438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088933581869251,0.0,0.09746952586109764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096108226574746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960990658338422,0.0,0.0,0.08318131219698273,0.0,0.3142220308119998,0.06203034287321835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853523345556774,0.0,0.04748652992595271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813400970541572,0.0,0.05337437809297663,0.0,0.07511285417346646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304922119650733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982785057306556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802344655829542,0.0,0.1669529330904354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655371766321954,0.10594084445790744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06633533875853523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984365224553533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3299783129679334,0.07496250547409371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965303056768144,0.06510922552530828,0.16400689225723733,0.0,0.0,0.08878056215490669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125686004069162,0.0,0.0,0.09441107932678897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060164713776261015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468542428986154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182935587174521,0.0,0.07768792327154725,0.1055650264442979,0.09398338656082257,0.09573508825600324,0.0,0.0723007878230632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945428095484893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061281458676008,0.0,0.0,0.17292966282364453,0.10740062981525376,0.0,0.12478665242004112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952583874510324,0.0,0.0,0.0897403440252027,0.0,0.06376250172709495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774901741721161,0.055393831656410535,0.1490916031980637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09053125025343084,0.0,0.27348659026729216,0.0,0.0,0.0667149205799446,0.0,0.0,0.12095708539710914
mentalhealth,reptile_orgy,2020/03/05,"Don't know what's wrong with me... I've always been someone who really needs a lot of personal space, so much so, that I once had to end a friendship because my personal space was not respected at all (he was also kind of manipulative but that's a whole other story) but recently I've discovered that I crave physical contact so much, I find it hard to function properly anymore. Like I've literally trained people around me to high-five me constantly (they don't know why, just think I like high-fives a lot I guess) cause I need the contact but I don't want to be too creepy. Other people don't have to endure stuff just cause I need it but I really don't know what to do (I know I'm probably not making much sense...sorry). And since I don't have many friends (or any friends to be percise) or people to talk to, I'm kinda dumbfounded over here... if anyone has an idea as to what might be happening, I'd really appreciate the opinions. :)",2.4528668730650125,4.3904922000000015,4.29513931888545,84.17509287925698,77.0,8.049535603715169,24.86068111455109,8.841846274778883,1.9010743034055728,738,26,151,17,17,250,107,190,0.079,0.82,0.10099999999999999,0.7081,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,1,0,9,7,0,0,7,0,18,0,0,4,1,36,32,13,0,5,11,0,1,2,2,1,0,0,0,2,12,3,0,0,7,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,4,1,16,6,17,24,7,8,0,0,0,0,10,5,0,9,5,95,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733270397534048,0.10127378198954627,0.0,0.0,0.0827680458761295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070517928643805,0.08510356441755533,0.0,0.0,0.10834910768423607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741942475172122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250062632693522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152697566607427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780033111444727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11124217618299914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18806812459849326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340790237043004,0.0,0.1076291453851964,0.0,0.1090296662021044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571899265882134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13739755539712686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674387773113835,0.2675579982555637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892425704800663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069496602571677,0.0,0.0,0.08124342260449262,0.12339643546446075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911674903934847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684160397336984,0.27074277593494306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961885703129394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25313844726128465,0.2125477084145227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122566537717767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339146580590543,0.0,0.120175498673203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068107404261832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10312582403410922,0.0,0.0,0.13624614552823167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933063616998198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978271550607202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798786390059345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178864142125921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982576701644382,0.1358866289004696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13307250260217116,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drasticallybland,2020/03/05,"What helped you stop being Hypervigilant in public? I’m struggling to make going outside less stressful and mentally draining.
What helped you?",6.772463768115943,10.761823347826088,5.869565217391307,66.63594202898551,76.3913043478261,6.544927536231885,33.7536231884058,7.793537801064563,3.4825188405797105,119,6,14,2,3,36,20,23,0.306,0.6940000000000001,0.0,-0.8109,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198040473327639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5184727979993908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581646295878867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38976209603506395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3233478342251406,0.4430311172324869,0.4043244715578901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Quisitive_,2020/03/05,"Moralities , idk I’ve been suffering from extremely heavy panic attacks lately . I have insomnia and I’m up rn just laying in the bed feeling awful .ive been going to the hospital and have even been hospitalized but have yet to see any real help with my sleep panic attacks are now keeping me up too and I really just want Xans idk how to get them from my psychiatrist who I think already sees me “at risk” which I mean they aren’t wrong but this is just torturous I feel like too though if I need them I can just get them myself but at the same time why have health insurance if they can’t give you you’re medications also I don’t want to prove my psych right she never said anything directly but I got the feeling that she judged me because I smoke weed. Which is a sin in South Carolina",2.201014150943397,4.519382477987428,3.573675314465412,87.1408903301887,79.56603773584905,7.245440251572328,22.516116352201266,8.278499904357787,1.3676191823899375,630,20,128,13,16,206,103,159,0.212,0.71,0.078,-0.9765,1,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,5,0,12,10,3,3,5,1,15,4,1,1,2,28,33,12,0,5,10,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,1,0,5,4,0,1,6,0,0,1,4,9,0,0,5,6,26,1,13,28,1,14,2,1,2,0,12,8,0,2,6,86,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755852205836382,0.1272426582459496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820233842234203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093649276647473,0.0,0.0,0.36202815680860456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699384579965896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509267686169473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24135703497518424,0.1136704033302204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16626001555710224,0.15263574767030233,0.09042761993245264,0.0,0.12725725098675647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16912974451092866,0.0,0.0,0.10665013154153977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14142700036533706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17948646448441394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773460501285759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17332077017930642,0.0,0.16028967048552206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179803194055504,0.12271780247224826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3733697910134873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811054989102924,0.10193190188047237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588168562294475,0.1513529585466576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535850200535084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15922797161368998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10195322546622113,0.15632777561592126,0.0,0.09278010604238356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876980129642875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357479005836654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396515537913346,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway00099994737,2020/03/05,"How do I get someone involuntary committed to a psychiatric hospital in the state of GA? My mother is showing signs of manic bipolar depression. She has not been diagnosed. This is something that has happened on/off for at least the last 10 years, but she doesn’t really believe in therapy/counseling/mental illness. She has been having an episode — or what seems like it — since Saturday. She hasn’t eaten or slept and is crying hysterically one minute and then laughing the next. She called out of work the last 3 days and has been drinking alcohol nonstop. She hasn’t eating since the weekend. 

She just tried to do something to harm herself and I am afraid for my own safety and hers too. How do I go about getting her committed to a mental institution?",5.923928571428572,7.495174964285718,6.305714285714287,74.78928571428571,67.21428571428571,9.6,34.0,9.888512548439397,3.5890142857142866,605,28,103,14,10,195,95,140,0.099,0.795,0.106,-0.1803,0,0,4,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,8,0,18,8,1,2,2,17,25,11,0,0,5,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,6,4,0,1,3,0,1,4,3,0,1,5,0,15,2,14,20,2,14,0,1,0,0,12,4,0,3,9,76,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21363255398592207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252191069181051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041204865996291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195810177673657,0.1289191120170413,0.0,0.1721737765184525,0.20289452715774825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958261241072952,0.0,0.20454784202449205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20887924081551695,0.0,0.11360790829324535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17677111458015812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3258907380856009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766115578524713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20145241636746816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21259616407348547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13545757035781347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806120706973145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18198166307666205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307190745024532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16937481749264266,0.3077859289797627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357191354275078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455297493696106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872919513249795
mentalhealth,Spunnerfluff,2020/03/05,"How does a Canadian get a diagnosis?  
I'm hoping to get a diagnosis. I have a counsellor, a family Doctor, and a naturopath and they help, but I’m still not well and I would like to change medications. Currently, I am taking Pristiq and I feel like it's not very effective (almost 3 years of it) and I don't want to go to my doctor for a new medication without some sort of official diagnosis. I've been looking at psychologists but they dont seem to return my calls. What do I say on the voicemail? Mental health issues run in my family. My emotions shift very quickly, and I often experience extreme sadness, anger, and anxiety.  I’m constantly afraid that the people I care about will abandon me/leave me/don’t care about me. Sometimes the way I feel about the people in my life can dramatically change from one moment to the next—and I don’t always understand why, or the reason why doesn’t line up with my reactions. My previous romantic relationships have been intense, but unstable.  My current relationship of 3 years is super stable and not intense, but I when I’m feeling insecure in my relationship, I tend to lash out or make impulsive gestures to keep him close. He’s patient and seems to weather it well… In the past, I would often do things that I know are dangerous or unhealthy, such as having unsafe sex, binge drinking, or using drugs. Now I tend to go on spending sprees or binge eat. I’ve engaged in self-harm behaviours such as cutting (not recent, the last incident was over a year ago) but I think about suicide a lot (and my life really isn’t that bad). Fortunately, I haven’t made any solid plans to kill myself, just day dreams about it. I work full time and dont want to go to the psych ward but... I'm feeling like I'm losing it",4.782894736842106,5.951765491228072,6.114868421052632,76.60282894736844,69.52631578947367,9.442690058479533,30.03947368421053,9.725611199111238,2.870494736842105,1386,54,261,32,24,468,190,342,0.157,0.7090000000000001,0.135,-0.9209999999999999,2,0,2,0,0,2,46.0,0,0,2,5,16,19,4,2,18,0,22,11,0,6,0,59,55,26,2,5,17,0,4,3,0,3,8,1,0,0,10,14,2,2,11,2,1,4,12,10,1,1,4,6,33,9,38,48,3,37,0,3,1,1,10,13,0,14,22,162,43,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293318482949576,0.0,0.09368444165681296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778474342498193,0.0,0.0,0.06362238955382457,0.0,0.07157132291367338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781167044595877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553278997807496,0.0,0.19077645693641515,0.0,0.19794311247314345,0.0,0.0,0.1011025498316948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033692481167297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19152037606779068,0.08187290338350416,0.0,0.2192976667751139,0.09165084944784108,0.10849713615479124,0.09573280153364948,0.0,0.1052397295359316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151730426610967,0.1763955946833436,0.0,0.18922217424186508,0.1336751642683973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775998958276433,0.0,0.1595128537604622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09944737468068687,0.0,0.0,0.0627097003062682,0.0,0.0,0.09292382626402176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976498478271878,0.0,0.08315831101127517,0.1035076443701496,0.0,0.051416820987694636,0.07626194694116538,0.0,0.09906401049997833,0.0,0.0,0.13216502709856484,0.13712258147240314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856483737335264,0.1046670452174007,0.0,0.07953934252971451,0.0,0.0885264817918236,0.06245043756819866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884989179675315,0.09428407556737628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035853200175924,0.09949958983006636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339706432953811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931133417119612,0.12972214685210648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05993540679396778,0.09619281494583982,0.09237686247727077,0.301337611458215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744007742318743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17034268620634516,0.09760100139892786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253087804413312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471523586392154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233685082361704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07034368654795088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215552527238687,0.05994794494701485,0.0,0.0,0.054554200357788483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739678148773573,0.0,0.08080374450858796,0.0,0.15438966862911332,0.11036541606597046,0.07426168368781111,0.0,0.0,0.16823907167326935,0.0,0.16884239945993326,0.0,0.0,0.09018620668061424,0.0,0.0681110613329008,0.0,0.0,0.13292129732574048,0.0,0.0,0.18074411884135544
mentalhealth,idylliclara,2020/03/05,"Emotional Invalidation How do you deal with emotional invalidation? Being sensitive often comes with disagreement and disrespect at times when expressing your emotions to others. Having your feelings dismissed is very difficult and I am curious how others deal with this, especially if it’s from someone you care about. 

Remember: your feelings are valid!",9.332727272727274,13.046825909090913,8.867272727272725,51.0809090909091,62.63636363636364,13.127272727272725,41.90909090909091,11.979248473330829,7.232927272727274,295,17,33,12,5,94,43,55,0.128,0.7290000000000001,0.14300000000000002,-0.1742,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,5,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,2,0,13,10,6,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,1,7,9,0,4,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,2,2,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200617936759845,0.0,0.0,0.18592580514334264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4450401495113953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7283679764124602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21826891921372196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445030097897179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828793088642788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585719827363473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17808941390963845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PushEmma,2020/03/05,"I dont ""suffer"" from a mental health problem, but do you think I have ""something""? I have what is, in my opinion, moderate anxiety. I dont have actual panic attacks. But I had issues talking freely to classmates, I work as a teacher and dont engage the same as everyone else with others. I dont think I have issues understanding social cues like in autism at all. But I block myself easily when we are in a big group of people. Im a lot more relaxed talking one on one to something, personally I think others may think Im a different person there. Important information, I stutter somewhat regularly, I have controlled it quite well since kid/teenage years, but is still something I have to bear with daily. Sometimes is a struggle to start a sentence but then I talk quite well IMO.

What made me do this post honestly is that I have a weird ""reflect"" of, when talking trough something or getting nervous in a conversation, if there's a table with objects I nearly unconsciously take one and put it in another place. Like ordering it. My friend and my gf find it quite weird. And this made me think if maybe there's some info out there about why I do it. It may be just nothing, just wanted to talk about myself here a bit.",5.134224683544304,6.118098464135024,5.969997362869201,78.64335047468356,68.57805907172997,8.62542194092827,31.268196202531644,8.841846274778883,2.5725360759493667,964,39,179,16,16,317,131,237,0.10800000000000001,0.7290000000000001,0.163,0.9478,1,0,4,0,0,0,32.0,1,1,0,5,14,17,1,3,12,0,23,1,0,3,1,43,35,17,0,4,10,0,0,2,2,2,1,0,0,2,13,9,0,2,10,1,0,1,4,9,2,3,3,0,26,8,24,29,7,20,0,1,0,0,15,11,0,9,8,132,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.08831306688551685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948951225139424,0.06923077981964852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029546252600407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880045931638692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150128653812933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455122704478336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4242522805337186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559952936560999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647478905813234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271360121688202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991858840506934,0.0,0.04728150911880444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619522205094533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955069015154101,0.18891295672989947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842557661134735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693822728854806,0.0,0.1712629338018563,0.0,0.0,0.09091748030089876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120077442158198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868353438956836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839715135811123,0.0,0.0,0.10617999234113623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273997056951534,0.1580388571726606,0.09455122704478336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667214005776602,0.0,0.0,0.08659443592909237,0.0,0.09097556130653836,0.0,0.2887675277927597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486094298217445,0.0,0.0,0.09225139096942372,0.0,0.27867935848252623,0.08950491039712631,0.0,0.0640550034136859,0.0,0.07227187975143684,0.0,0.0,0.09460823743199273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804328992182394,0.3636946241757861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899375621625062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421168786348727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05337810947397886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16273727596348522,0.0,0.08166043678786487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588367656845112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058277793329296786
mentalhealth,yachtrock94,2020/03/05,Would regularly posting pictures of yourself and talking about your daily life be a sign of narcissim? Just curious. Obviously this is something a lot lf people do lol.,5.654022988505743,8.915670034482762,6.897241379310348,62.830229885057484,72.79310344827587,9.383908045977012,40.70114942528736,9.725611199111238,5.4057494252873575,137,9,18,4,3,46,27,29,0.0,0.831,0.16899999999999998,0.6249,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,4,1,0,0,1,6,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,14,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381591467158281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4070207798637573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33190876174026845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4585153997176072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685693504351535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3848055115933727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34009414949472194,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SleepingBooti,2020/03/05,"I ugly cried at work today— anyone else? First off, I think work is a huge part of mental health. I’m not saying all jobs cause mental illnesses (although some do), I am saying that your 40+ a week environment has a large affect on your mental and physical health. Let me explain my week so far. 

I started a job back in October. I have experience so I caught on quick, although different industry so there is a learning curve. Was doing very well until I was given a new project, a whole new workload on top of my others. I have been so overwhelmingly busy and stressed that I’ve been physically in pain when I leave work, I cry on my way home. Not out of sadness but just pure exhaustion. I ask for help, and my supervisor doesn’t send any. So I get to a point I feel like I’m going to have a breakdown just out of pure mental and physical exhaustion. I’m having to work OT to even make progress. 

Today my supervisor wants to bring up unapproved overtime and that she is so disappointed etc, etc. I just start ugly crying. There is no way I can perform my responsibilities in 8 hours. I’m so fucking exhausted, the stress is unbelievable. She’s mad that people are on their phones when mine is running on the same charge from three days ago. She says I don’t need to be crying, that I have no reason to be upset. 

I’m just saying that you would think employers would understand human limits.. because they are human. And when you give an employee a workload that literally brings them to tears, maybe you should offer a hand. 

I know I’m not alone here, I’ve seen many posts about work place anxiety and depression. Please feel free to comment your workplace scenario and we can talk about it together. 

Also, I did not apologize one bit for falling apart in the conference room. I said what I had to say and left. I have every right to my feelings.",3.7554677081348866,5.478289745856356,4.8920880167651015,82.22190607734811,72.8121546961326,8.087026100209563,26.294913316822253,8.74248658614541,1.925791274528481,1456,50,285,28,29,479,206,362,0.198,0.7170000000000001,0.085,-0.9916,5,1,0,0,0,0,42.0,1,6,3,10,24,16,2,4,15,0,34,9,1,4,3,45,64,24,0,5,9,0,4,1,0,3,7,6,2,2,10,12,0,1,10,0,1,7,8,13,1,3,10,11,44,4,36,48,8,51,0,4,1,1,31,24,1,1,18,189,54,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343568359033753,0.0,0.0,0.08580078745569553,0.0,0.06624984424419357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056336358939325024,0.0,0.06337498113012416,0.0,0.0,0.057926037775721965,0.08488286249830236,0.0,0.0,0.07744740437377261,0.0,0.0,0.06370146790003302,0.0,0.05050057319969016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09044354636962416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510300130691954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.363998379024476,0.053427145338667,0.0,0.07135290677725571,0.0,0.0,0.08655373008080111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920503798271566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18478459939509487,0.05471729032754839,0.0,0.0697991450866853,0.0,0.0,0.08103675040267397,0.0,0.0,0.12566435026403838,0.059183347940166775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046656137205183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658739669657802,0.04328226196518434,0.07947094668289399,0.04708181845995679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17611733966216397,0.0,0.0,0.055528190786399874,0.0,0.08309869386242727,0.0,0.0815840703278373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16441860096310792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04552857104229368,0.0,0.0,0.08771920848358568,0.09000960627150117,0.08471299851184949,0.0,0.04047310505358495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055298618794937325,0.08399021393549666,0.0832273392482082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339466851638773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06142733806605876,0.0,0.16002136127801533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05613683794046741,0.0,0.08815122806715596,0.0,0.0,0.0897113389121966,0.0,0.05743318884036465,0.0,0.08655373008080111,0.09093718566960182,0.07831379885811265,0.0,0.07934108578550872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517682199893316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074781863451934,0.07880305290567237,0.32940201962585586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727398256115708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18979369021420733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658639409902017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616542282973417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570517302066964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624291039534279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835448848596666,0.04886318902499237,0.1315144840366547,0.13290397131957254,0.0,0.07448617378152511,0.0,0.0,0.0924917076361656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30155494204932903,0.0,0.0,0.11769916171552393,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Staying100-33,2020/03/05,"Financial Issues Receiving Mental Health I went to an intake session today because things have reached a tipping point for me. I started breaking down crying just at the basic questions today. I left feeling like maybe it's possible to get better. Now I feel completely empty because help was dangled in my face and ripped away. 

I dont have insurance. Well didnt about 8 hours ago. I lost my job last year and had no way to pay for insurance during the open enrollment. They are saying I dont qualify for special enrollment. Also the clinic I went to wont do sliding scale or anything.

I called today to set up insurance for myself but they only provide benefits for inpatient help. The agent made it sound like I would be able to make therapy/psychiatric appointments.

How do you guys afford to get help with poor/no mental health coverage. This really makes me feel like it will be impossible. After taxes and child support I have $1,400 for housing/health insurance/food/transportation/therapy/medication.

Do I need to get credit cards and max them out and file bankruptcy later? Get fired and work at mcdonalds so I make less money? I know this is a immature way to think about it but I dont know how I could possibly pay without becoming homeless. I have a psychiatric appointment next Wednesday and therapy session scheduled for Friday. I really dont want to cancel them and keep sinking. I'm 27. I cant take advantage of inpatient because I'd lose my job.

I really need to hear that it's possible. I dont have any friends. I've been looking for a roommate but I cant force anyone to share a home/cost with me.

Apologies that this comes off as me being stupid/immature/weak and thank you for any advise.",3.8546830265848686,6.258388865030677,5.0449325153374245,78.24766462167692,74.4601226993865,8.763844580777096,29.27157464212679,9.3871,3.0885631083844585,1374,60,237,36,30,453,188,326,0.09,0.778,0.132,0.9439,3,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,2,4,5,9,15,0,0,10,0,28,4,1,6,0,39,57,18,0,5,6,0,4,3,1,3,3,3,0,2,11,14,0,1,7,0,5,5,11,2,1,0,8,8,36,13,37,42,1,34,0,2,1,0,20,11,0,2,17,144,47,12,0.08162625001166424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235674558923874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527648264357604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101729818262708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057074971913001066,0.0,0.06717144875235721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669054885779862,0.0,0.0,0.14927581313894792,0.0901497800891205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219178484846926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334952762377562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703137867029277,0.08558357013283452,0.0,0.0,0.06517191864589973,0.0,0.08966260276439626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4783267854654102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238180538008691,0.11662761863605775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870278552043288,0.0,0.06306423827634393,0.0,0.17058538652746727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082282077229311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26029466024060016,0.09199871617829672,0.0,0.16413706432594186,0.0,0.08187778415931883,0.0,0.0803854139055445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519659784664109,0.1620029159991576,0.07255316151000653,0.0,0.0,0.08971930459110702,0.06653628826996874,0.0,0.0,0.08868715947285738,0.0,0.0,0.11963538796365628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854549191341068,0.0913188945769184,0.08910469427409347,0.0,0.0,0.07723673140119419,0.16345846716301474,0.0,0.0820045394504128,0.0,0.09066836244211476,0.0,0.16452012262572324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104966020238135,0.0,0.0,0.08681044291702131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06208044135356783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771631901966643,0.2760639969561547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144008105796388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568755977511768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06491247024705454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057775479886259085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262850119841068,0.0,0.0,0.061372781496617526,0.0,0.0,0.07515048417818804,0.09334673068656543,0.0,0.05422885348423368,0.05230280508395637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321164221124832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04814527712009285,0.12958223574012334,0.0,0.0,0.0733918016790244,0.151336703078435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868479217171992,0.0,0.05942488217243719,0.0,0.0,0.05798494603676154,0.0,0.0,0.052564628785781255
mentalhealth,throwawayacc3459438,2020/03/05,"What is the point of life? I don't even know where to begin as I have a very difficult time expressing myself properly, but I am going to try my best. I will be turning 30 years old in the next few months. I have been engaged to my fiance for a few years and we've been together for 12. We live in a small apartment. I work as a manager at a retail company. Seems pretty normal right? Wrong.

Waking up and getting ready for work is an incredibly difficult task for me. Most days, when I wake up, suicide is the first thought that comes to mind. I have to really force myself to get out of bed, which results in me being late to work almost everyday. Sometimes it gets so rough that I will call in sick and not go to work at all. Most days I do not take a shower or take care of my personal hygiene whatsoever. 

I am a very shy person. I have been this way since I could remember. I've always hated having interactions with other human beings. When I am away from people, I feel much more at peace. I don't have the ability to form a human connection with others, and quite frankly, I don't even WANT to form human connections with others. I avoid all social events, and I even isolate myself from my friends and family. I miss my family every day but I don't even have the strength to text/call them back when they contact me. I don't know what they truly think of me but they must think I am this stuck-up person who hates them. Truth is, I think about them everyday, and knowing the fact that I'll never be able consistently connect with my family makes me very sad. Isolating myself from people makes me feel much more at ease. 

At work, I pretend to be a completely different person. At work, I act like I have my shit together, I act like this amazing leader, and I basically fake my way through this job. I believe. I have done a pretty good job in fooling people, even my boss, into thinking I am this really great manager.

But lately I feel as if I cannot keep the facade up any longer. A lot of times I will disappear (into random rooms where I will unlikely be found, usually the bathroom) where I will end up uncontrollably crying because my thoughts are spiralling downwards again. I sometimes look around for possible methods of suicide. Many times I am undeservingly cold to employees and customers. 

What I feel is that I simply just exist. I feel I am stationed in one spot, just waiting there, just empty. 

I should have been married by now. I should be planning to have children in the very near future. But yet I let the minutes, hours, days, weeks, months, and years pass by. 

About a year ago, my mom learned of my suicidal thoughts and brought me to the hospital to get checked. I waited for hours to talk to a few doctors who asked me a bunch of questions. They booked a specialist appointment for a future date to which I never showed up to. I do this all the time; I will either cancel plans or not show up to something I've previously agreed to.

2 weeks ago, I swallowed a couple handfuls of tylonel, hoping to kill myself. It obviously was not enough. I want to try again on my 30th birthday, but this time I will swallow a lot more than a couple of handfuls.

I know I should see a doctor but I have zero motivation to do that.

So I will continue to silently suffer, until my next attempt.",3.847649769585253,5.355831167434715,4.912992012288786,83.0289165898618,72.19508448540707,7.911533026113671,26.998494623655915,8.488131031819089,1.8811298678955457,2594,91,506,44,50,851,298,651,0.14800000000000002,0.735,0.11699999999999999,-0.9614,7,2,2,0,0,3,79.0,1,0,7,14,25,26,4,2,33,0,61,11,5,5,9,93,106,30,4,10,18,1,8,2,1,12,4,0,3,8,24,21,2,4,22,4,2,8,12,14,0,3,11,11,92,12,86,74,21,93,0,3,2,0,28,35,1,12,50,369,116,16,0.06386111337111865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321804768880755,0.0,0.06394768032246115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05313756213189998,0.0,0.0,0.043427746983249436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05684993024257067,0.059701520385369425,0.0,0.05999961819146835,0.049105254271112536,0.0,0.03892914197360955,0.0,0.0,0.0719496061041254,0.06701829856539239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520933685242802,0.0,0.06511066120195241,0.0,0.0,0.055010694519798016,0.06695716236109127,0.0,0.0,0.050987902600749015,0.14132221457470742,0.07014843435130805,0.16474054010510913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672127132770167,0.0,0.13072911112482427,0.0,0.06535209108363971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656199146413447,0.06598560126401676,0.0,0.2108983154655968,0.0,0.053805742322402296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806077225782436,0.0,0.16145048866099349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054320230410008635,0.0,0.07002041460133814,0.04933893777618522,0.0,0.13345918386462668,0.0,0.07258748481748377,0.05356367202569244,0.0,0.0704071029411934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609925649368384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342849496866748,0.12578066565774387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674460217877992,0.05676269180516703,0.07065286013402809,0.0,0.14038559118547933,0.0,0.14407623495385824,0.0,0.0,0.06530231514477536,0.04510699297151553,0.06239862848738871,0.0,0.056390533096531775,0.0,0.053627251399346335,0.0,0.0,0.10858486978619954,0.0,0.0,0.0852555781297879,0.06474514556022602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644815197477905,0.07479336415228596,0.10194666284453308,0.0,0.09389053256330576,0.0,0.09850725508913312,0.0,0.13583403711744008,0.0,0.06257033210547665,0.0,0.0,0.06701149588743642,0.0,0.04327394315887439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281976544242874,0.22304424383075733,0.0,0.0,0.06036939387172885,0.07199381001733261,0.0,0.12993942156621724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153906227803508,0.06792415489000736,0.0,0.0,0.08182212896560699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234219246942959,0.05453704188774002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050889039230560984,0.05813675915738624,0.0,0.0,0.06555251516659498,0.05282657290312598,0.0,0.0,0.06509836286221313,0.0,0.0491634050448009,0.12632054809695406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20956107884964312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603121928292233,0.051329143911724495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636784913978904,0.0,0.1520957719832493,0.1861896438208453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671500805082577,0.0694625531674378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033399414814785,0.21076842643203755,0.07533387850136,0.10137995860768466,0.10245106620666863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27894990669818265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982210238579017,0.0,0.16449785296861527
mentalhealth,Dopehope22,2020/03/05,"I think I have PPD and I’m not sure what to do I think I have  paranoid personality disorder, majority of the signs fit me, I’m overly paranoid about my trust in others etc 
My good friend is staying with me for a week and I am scared that he will hurt my dogs or do something bad (completely unwarranted) I keep “reading” hostile facial movements, I keep finding borderline insulting (I don’t think they are) words in his language, like I’m just a mess here and I’m scared I’m going to become hostile towards my friend and potential ruin a friendship, I don’t know what to do, i need to work and I’m scared to leave him and everything, I don’t know what to do, what should I do? (It’s just one week I need to get though then Im back to being alone ) does anyone know any techniques or something to settle my thoughts?",1.315595475715238,3.614125952095812,3.007974051896209,90.02164836992681,82.89221556886227,5.866799733865602,23.64903526280772,7.1686216300943375,0.9395977378576176,642,24,135,9,18,212,94,167,0.235,0.652,0.113,-0.9585,0,1,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,1,6,16,3,3,4,0,16,1,1,0,1,28,35,10,0,3,5,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,2,8,1,0,2,4,10,0,1,1,0,23,6,17,31,2,12,0,2,0,0,8,5,0,2,5,84,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14637054324589066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961061513182781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098818039656017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867054649006674,0.1180008464304378,0.0,0.15608285462508792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817704404973164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16197120798210762,0.0,0.12367485246345652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15761523290739274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701420050284504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291688997130376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21837538206299856,0.0,0.07383671391158593,0.0,0.08031850929744376,0.11853708116263505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512918157110216,0.0,0.15265573607921,0.0,0.0,0.25123310449258696,0.0,0.0,0.23300631174663955,0.0,0.0,0.14964324430555884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904447557197782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095820588481361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576578151681407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339993055901426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14136369329429274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4244742854798173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21759846977002426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063412428049905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331975628071226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716669230141141,0.1388515357214436,0.11219661999911833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267255005279184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288660977391388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway29646291,2020/03/05,"i don’t know what i’m feeling i’m feeling weird and i don’t know why, but i feel numb and weak and bored and just... weird. i can’t tell if anything’s wrong. i’ve given up on homework and i’ve stopped paying attention in class. my life is just a big boring circle and i can’t do anything about it. i feel weird and i can’t descirbe it. probably just angst.",-1.5639029535864992,0.3960468607594939,0.8686392405063295,100.56051160337557,99.37974683544304,3.6459915611814337,17.975738396624468,5.46131890053228,-0.5800894514767934,278,9,67,2,12,93,44,79,0.318,0.649,0.032,-0.9682,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,0,0,20,16,9,0,1,5,0,4,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,3,7,0,1,7,0,1,0,5,8,0,0,1,4,8,0,4,15,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,1,35,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4540091352449717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5579208485944237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032045954700306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19484403550686494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974175696139585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306265294992845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24110879894831694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24891558075269934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016033501725968,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MAJiK03,2020/03/05,"What’s wrong with me? I know that my mental heath hasn’t always been in a great place, I’ve experienced pretty severe suicidal thoughts before but I always just pushed through it until I was in a less miserable state. I’ve never considered my struggles to be anything worthy of being diagnosed with a mental illness, but I did try to speak to a therapist for a bit which lead to nowhere. 

Recently I went to a lecture for a class and from the minute I sat down I was experiencing this really uncomfortable feeling where I was just nervous for no reason and had cold sweats. There was no test or other possible stressor that could have caused me to act this way. At the end of the class I had to speak to the professor for all of 20 seconds to schedule a meeting for her office hours and it made me so uncomfortable it nearly put me in tears. What is happening to me? It’s not at all common for this to happen to me although I do avoid things like speaking in class because I’m afraid of people looking at me or thinking I’m dumb. 

I feel like a freak and anytime I consider something might be wrong I feel like I’m just self-diagnosing myself to make excuses. I don’t know what to do, does anyone have advice?",4.9217064315352665,5.7299015311203325,5.903462136929464,79.56564963692948,68.95850622406638,8.846576763485476,30.000259336099585,9.017664075816787,2.422080705394191,963,36,186,17,16,319,137,241,0.2,0.711,0.08900000000000001,-0.9829,0,1,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,7,13,1,5,13,0,20,3,1,5,3,32,37,11,1,1,8,0,3,3,0,1,2,3,0,0,15,6,0,1,8,0,0,5,6,9,0,1,12,10,25,4,38,20,4,25,0,1,1,0,6,11,1,3,10,134,40,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884268214201966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194201855323929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219286338045247,0.0,0.1085016424945887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037477832783715,0.0,0.11219497675683757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14394648476359476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13544667776403102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527181338121257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676507554107948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538317109356665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11678031662739215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20000256742126915,0.18838790017612506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536552836021646,0.0,0.0,0.2331897415616451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984608197918102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449230602051856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19324633211932224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072112625743556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476003381792268,0.08801116395062873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657483776196757,0.1398724352590961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169115462190427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140846388914732,0.0,0.13775560212323534,0.0,0.0,0.1486415119306315,0.0,0.1341392550022305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254606648674847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446674065383457,0.1355641679503927,0.13018636066165626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375487197585436,0.14895341908632775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015048773742895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378386629196181,0.0,0.1442229343260018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530884734907419,0.08759554517470895,0.084484410625198,0.0,0.10467448752609848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951776479567113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465670814812507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222663913549915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883154221814507,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunshine564,2020/03/05,Not sure what I’m feeling So my day has been interesting.. yesterday I was basically called ugly and a lot of other things by someone I considered a friend. She blamed me for saying things I didn’t . She also brought up my boyfriend (who died in November due to suicide) well she basically insulted him and said she didn’t care at all. That hurt a lot to be honest seeing that she and a couple others knew I have been battling with depression and suicidal thoughts the past few months. I’ve been happy then I feel literally dead. I don’t want to end it because I don’t want to hurt anyone and cause pain I to anyone. But I don’t know what to do at this point. My life isn’t all that bad and wanting to kill myself makes me feel selfish and just bad about myself in general. I feel like Im wrong for feeling this way and don’t know how to stop it even after therapy and counseling the thoughts never seem to stop..,4.032071960297767,4.986817682795699,5.1523655913978486,83.60624069478911,71.09677419354837,8.518775847808106,27.748552522746078,8.841846274778883,1.9758483043837884,723,25,150,13,13,239,111,186,0.276,0.616,0.10800000000000001,-0.9909,0,0,0,0,0,2,14.0,0,0,0,0,7,19,3,0,6,0,15,2,0,3,4,39,35,14,5,3,3,0,5,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,14,10,0,2,11,0,0,1,9,11,1,0,11,8,23,8,21,23,5,19,0,3,1,0,12,6,0,3,12,103,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014153729424987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17734655201460292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21177351141643055,0.07730636235126552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294941621579264,0.0,0.1292982098403519,0.13027581746841066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14032041003628934,0.0,0.0817863639015103,0.0,0.10922714964693593,0.0,0.13161584749699196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232206993927063,0.0,0.0,0.08376132001936969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32061199773364496,0.09059796852071428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797836809087676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349988734303321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715200782951848,0.0,0.13698393801951245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403040326544352,0.0,0.13939042618044914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957447727966565,0.06195629725589868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21563026730071536,0.0,0.0,0.08465121861452764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012239836123856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097808957121525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494204811739474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106101363060676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988289494635924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206318458648551,0.1008498330810682,0.0,0.0,0.10105659428950277,0.11544927890771164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10745148832063048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21204909632446967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27743405710911123,0.0,0.11952336123454645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450260970284168,0.0,0.1685029332961128,0.0,0.0,0.20135679450634308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22439955571203002,0.10066129662702256,0.0,0.0,0.11402356004444805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865429530458712,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,askinquestions33,2020/03/05,"My controlling issues SORRY THAT IT'S SO LONG BUT I JUST WANT HELP  


Alright. So, to start this, I have a mixture of mental health problems that create my controlling issues. I was never diagnosed with anything because I never went to a psychologist, but my symptoms are crazy similar to OCD and such. And even if I don't have OCD, there's definitely something weird happening in my mind. So basically, the main problem with me is that I want to control the whole world. I want to control everything and everybody. And I also wanna say that I don't want to control the whole world, but my mind wants to do it. It's telling me to feel like that, so I feel like I want to control the whole world. I want to get rid of that feeling. The worst part is that all these controlling thoughts are linked with perfection, great attention to details, orderliness, checking things out and such (OCD). Plus with all these things there are thoughts telling me to do something or I'll die, I also think that's the OCD. Basically, when I do something, a lot of times there are thoughts like ""do that two more times or you'll die"". I have these type of thoughts since 2016, 2017 and just recently they got a little worse. That's the reason why I'm writing this post. BTW, I'm only 14 and it's very hard for me to process all this stuff. It's haunting me everyday and I just feel like there is no escaping. It's a mental prison. I just want these bad thoughts to stop. I also think all this might be linked to the fact that my life has not been the most easiest, because my dad left me and my mom when I was just 3 years old, and he left us with no money, which made us (me and my mom) a working class family, and we were broke since then. And I think all that lead to me having trust issues. You know, I never trusted nobody. I'm emotionally more connected to animals than I am to people, and if you wanna have my trust, you need to gain it. Also, the financial situation is getting a little better, and this year might be a year where things might change for me, at least a little bit. There might be things I didn't mention, but whatever, it's enough. So, anybody, please, can you give me any tips for overcoming my problems? Thanks to everybody.",3.4963945578231304,5.103743265306125,4.201097505668937,87.38477551020411,73.26303854875283,7.5796825396825405,26.43219954648526,8.238735603445708,1.5775249886621312,1744,61,361,28,35,556,190,441,0.126,0.711,0.163,0.9357,0,0,3,0,0,0,62.0,3,5,1,12,25,19,0,0,19,1,35,4,0,10,10,97,69,36,2,16,14,3,5,4,0,5,4,1,0,0,35,23,0,8,17,0,2,2,9,7,0,1,13,6,53,12,39,48,18,32,0,1,0,0,20,12,0,10,21,253,88,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904422892307405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040486227876188816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04899269979508916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049709712569223095,0.07258465946096536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05265437188636792,0.06499742079879478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298073692540213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4674194143296384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06042734841743935,0.12357704048765294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669695008549718,0.0,0.06151615671779485,0.0,0.039322681243113514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05350672974136795,0.0,0.056124835083912535,0.0,0.12041188831964468,0.12759666525992586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062209754194680576,0.05711194187053096,0.0,0.0,0.0476160324949441,0.06563817401991671,0.0,0.0,0.05264710626013741,0.0,0.05333217504892508,0.0,0.0,0.0632835248918906,0.0,0.0,0.0399054363479886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18641899584086088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03271919124345237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293711378997292,0.0,0.042051732431774916,0.11634428528270105,0.17901083940244006,0.0,0.05268710430197634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05061501099476821,0.0,0.05633399405517293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11999569947894655,0.25263131774613296,0.12022790421612052,0.1394546756415521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04414486938086701,0.13775250113256368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06247256377056565,0.0,0.0,0.04527948232284113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644712185640003,0.0,0.041274466700120166,0.0,0.0,0.06535217558884188,0.0,0.0,0.05701861709799092,0.0,0.0,0.1709024946805273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06121247965159491,0.05878419108383386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04734507334353122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984968743277886,0.06692047299777565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750016692652156,0.0,0.06664519425000978,0.042139581535903255,0.0,0.0,0.049774400765945206,0.0,0.0,0.06815398172568331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188025102782565,0.0,0.0,0.10407342132845536,0.05481235225953587,0.0,0.0,0.15821114406985015,0.11444396431137335,0.0,0.2363229544578881,0.06943133707419552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058157599186743736,0.0,0.14322791602952215,0.0,0.0,0.04912307875955761,0.28092496467565725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551900680989862,0.05372159005372057,0.1994080069701696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334260264902495,0.0,0.060671830169620085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501686173703572
mentalhealth,peeweesheweelee,2020/03/06,"Can I sleep in the hallway at a mental hospital? This isn't my first rodeo, I've been 5 times but I always got lucky and never had a roommate. What can I do to ensure I don't have one again? Can I sleep in the hallway? Before you ask I'm suicidal and psychotic so i do need to go but refuse to sleep with a roomate. Please no rude answers.",-0.06540540540540363,1.8978794189189223,2.368851351351349,94.55435810810816,85.8918918918919,5.321621621621622,20.06081081081081,6.6274283507984215,0.16268108108108148,263,8,61,3,8,90,51,74,0.20600000000000002,0.667,0.127,-0.8095,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,2,2,1,0,5,0,10,3,3,0,1,10,15,5,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,2,3,0,8,1,7,12,0,8,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,4,42,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942414357179116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21823562408473027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986409164016368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19856461455979424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326697791583087,0.0,0.1867039229531619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352534079000265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730933859837636,0.180043926456846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581855190776421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562478836777551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7008281268132479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25534633250774424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612120044873588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,u_n_titled,2020/03/06,"How long does it take to adjust to a new dosage of your antidepressant? My cymbalta dose was recently doubled. From 60 mg to 120 mg. 

I have been having a lot of side effects, which has never happened to me on this medication before. Fatigue, confusion, nausea, headache, light headedness. Needless to say, this shit is wearing me out. I slept 17 hours yesterday, and 13 today. 

I’ve only been on this dosage for 5 days I think. I don’t know how long it’s supposed to take for your body to adjust to a new dosage, so if anyone has similar experiences I would really appreciate you sharing them. I don’t know whether to wait it out for my body to get used to it, or if I should go back to my doctor.

Any answers are appreciated. Thank you all in advance.",2.9431860706860715,4.921073682432431,4.636486486486486,82.09853430353432,75.68918918918921,7.797089397089397,26.92515592515593,8.617729084823388,2.050061746361746,587,23,116,12,13,198,98,148,0.057999999999999996,0.861,0.081,0.5278,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,4,1,2,4,5,1,1,3,0,13,9,5,4,2,24,25,8,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,8,3,0,1,7,0,0,3,3,3,0,0,4,2,17,2,23,19,3,20,0,1,0,0,7,6,1,5,11,77,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193617424473448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272984857660968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13496644703628485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493572496126905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3899332411471633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319789353939448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796553537358299,0.1536014675904405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169529434359335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170358721249544,0.0,0.0997538356183538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521451781672052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728549195159266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19292583592769225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31066488057226693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922348223703588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17682108025044407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537425295950992,0.33904265150524515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349324426311146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244460699116207,0.0,0.17330790849623082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958303223168045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18017196321763496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639430884446725,0.0,0.0,0.16159810919761433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246812977622668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16637539703294654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515956223658584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468659043165588,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KungFu-Kitten,2020/03/06,"Can’t get a job and depression is sinking in. Hi, I’m a first time poster so sorry for any mistakes. Basically a few months ago I (22f) moved over a 100 miles to live with my boyfriend (22m) of 7 years. I went to uni and he got a job so seemed like the best plan. However, since being here I’ve really been struggling to get a job and make friends. I’ve been medicated for my mental health for a couple of years  now and sitting in our apartment all day every day alone is just making me feel so much worse. My partner is so supportive and when he can he tries to get me out of the flat and cheer me up but it rarely works. I used to go for walks or drives to break up the day but just don’t have the motivation anymore unless I have an interview. I’ve started reading books again which has helped a little but I really need some advice on what I can do to help alleviate the depression that’s slowly creeping back into my head. I’m withdrawing into myself and becoming an introvert when I used to be so sociable. I can’t remember the last time I felt so alone and depressed. I don’t know what to do. Any advice is welcome please.",1.9429827760891565,3.7485362425531936,3.6874772036474175,88.5566666666667,78.06382978723406,7.199594731509625,23.105369807497468,8.11559375814309,1.1732816616008104,887,28,193,16,21,297,138,235,0.099,0.778,0.12300000000000001,0.7744,4,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,5,14,11,0,1,16,0,19,3,1,5,1,33,38,21,0,2,7,0,2,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,5,12,0,0,6,2,0,5,4,5,0,1,5,2,19,6,27,31,5,36,0,3,0,0,11,12,0,3,18,118,24,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255449192352926,0.10229959590792076,0.0,0.0,0.23904961338043446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695875554360156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445077945189605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887393445027072,0.0,0.0,0.12745578866494145,0.0,0.0,0.1211104590059768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769347059880667,0.0,0.22328009128978268,0.0,0.2981945495689196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723371510939073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835225067492041,0.0,0.11080692667559147,0.0,0.0,0.0981634595191554,0.0,0.0,0.08916163986333714,0.0,0.18088309494275825,0.0,0.06558733802945628,0.0,0.09229994489960452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184388550786827,0.12267015025232228,0.0,0.0,0.15470711788115124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3435650548056872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634235863571989,0.0940705023118542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056381068299408414,0.11566615799717987,0.10190475576232204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406750725018312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11625842644777168,0.11630112663494467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211519387635377,0.12265728313551805,0.08483597568477746,0.08557136741468124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668006740292498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11543626018816368,0.0,0.147862834598849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073140206510164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050604049549366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546423333573067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918648267791938,0.08168427418368486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064639442012574,0.0,0.0,0.13096026037361005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458720205079192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835243994962941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993457848765864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698161895539564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401623626947988,0.0,0.11760758484463628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14863411116806852
mentalhealth,bubbles5991,2020/03/06,"The thing when you think about suicide but don't actually want to do it? I've got a history of depression, low serotonin, all that jazz but recently went through CBT (Cognitive Behavioural Therapy) and now I'm the happiest I've felt since like forever... I still get suicidal thoughts though but with absolutely no reasoning for them or intention to follow through, like I was in the bath the other day minding my own business and my brain just hopped straight in there with; ""wouldn't it be mad if you just went underwater and never came back up?!"" and that was it, moment passes and I'm grand again.
I've heard the term ""suicidal ideation"" a few times but not sure if that's what I'm referring to, so I was just wondering if anyone else can relate and knows more about it.",7.323104026845637,6.879800865771812,7.195897651006714,76.64471895973158,63.83221476510067,11.74530201342282,36.0746644295302,11.20814326018867,3.9246704697986576,615,26,121,16,8,196,100,149,0.17600000000000002,0.6970000000000001,0.127,-0.8599,0,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,2,1,0,13,7,1,0,7,0,8,1,1,2,3,35,24,17,3,5,12,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,10,9,0,0,7,2,0,5,5,3,0,0,10,2,8,4,14,12,5,21,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,5,13,79,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.16204679824235138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161102850581564,0.17014409650095114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768688970464712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18537352395961973,0.0,0.18992393881882166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070924460453287,0.0,0.14302387430178348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387185624320652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15943989562043176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675745774632725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281023147270676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126008898586983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16225324380567435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766932219853492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12807270018631256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17073332584796688,0.16396036409813786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373633206441622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261261475449013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5449152592455357,0.0,0.15650590763004474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898996205514588,0.0,0.1103202932106409,0.1064020428585796,0.16314927364983334,0.13182999355185102,0.0968286464150761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979441892523216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3078713338831449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18008075532937562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,verybambi,2020/03/06,"How to seek help when not actively suicidal? Hi all!! So just to clarify I’m a 26F American. I feel like I’ve struggled with depression for a good chunk of my life. A little history: when I was 18 I had a suicide plan & everything & after an isolated incidence of self harm, I panicked & called 911, resulting in getting a psychologist who I saw for about a month that helped in the short term but didn’t really do much overall (I’m not really blaming her; I was really uncomfortable/actively chose not to discuss my problems with her to the extent that she told me she could tell that whenever she asked me a question I was looking for a “right” answer rather than being authentic). I’ve had a lot of ups & downs since then, periods where I definitely should have sought help but didn’t (mostly because my parents knew about my previous history since I’d been living with them when it happened; I know that making them aware that my depression didn’t magically resolve itself would make them panic and more helicopter parents than they already are, which isn’t good for any of us), but lately I’ve been thinking I really, REALLY need to get help if I’m ever going to be a functional adult. I’ve literally been working on getting my bachelor’s degree since I graduated high school at 17, and have yet to complete it because I’m constantly struggling mentally & having to drop classes or retake them. 

This semester has been REALLY bad. I’m actually close to graduating & I think something about impending success combined with a shitty work environment triggered a major depressive episode. I’m doing a lot of the same things I did when I was 18, which is skipping all my classes (I literally haven’t gone to class in 3 weeks; I know for a fact I’m going to fail at least one & that’s going to set back my graduation by at least a semester, which is also terrifying because my parents are so THRILLED about my impending graduation & I’m letting them down AGAIN). I literally don’t even do anything outside of class either. I can’t even focus enough or maintain enough energy to do the basics, like laundry or getting dressed/doing my makeup (also a big thing, because I normally love getting dolled up on a regular basis but I literally wore sweats out the other day...again, normal for a lot of people, absolutely NOT for me). I’m having a hard time remembering anything, so I can’t even keep up with due dates and assignments online. I just feel like I’m really falling down that whole when I never really climbed out, but I’m not “actively” suicidal so idk how to seek help. Also: my previous psychologist never actually diagnosed me with anything, but when I told her anxiety was my primary concern she told me she felt that I was actually depressed which was causing the anxiety, & that I’d had “way more depressive symptoms than almost any client she’d seen” - so there’s that, I guess.

I have insurance through my work, but I don’t have a primary care doctor right now & every time I look all the doctors that look decent near me aren’t accepting new patients. There’s a “symptom checker” on Sutter’s website which tells you whether you should do walk-in or urgent care treatment, and it said I should go to urgent care ASAP but.....what can/does urgent care do for mental health? Should I be making an appointment with a general practice doctor or can I go straight to a psychiatrist? I live in the Sacramento area, are there any recommendations from people who live around here specifically? 


TL;DR How do I find/utilize mental health help when I’m not actively suicidal but I’m worried I could be heading there again? & when I have no current medical &/or psych connections in the city I’m currently living (Sacramento, CA)?",8.392223787167449,7.61797005492958,8.870962441314553,66.5896205007825,61.83098591549295,12.508607198748045,39.15884194053209,11.750952952430431,4.797161189358373,3009,138,517,82,36,1009,316,710,0.11699999999999999,0.743,0.14,0.9738,6,0,1,0,0,1,99.0,1,2,6,8,42,26,0,3,34,0,59,13,2,9,7,89,115,39,4,13,25,3,4,3,0,5,10,1,0,2,26,15,0,1,13,0,0,8,19,12,0,1,28,10,74,14,70,74,20,73,0,6,5,1,43,31,0,13,34,346,100,19,0.0,0.0,0.13261208810721853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045359111972211166,0.0,0.04998714789381891,0.1086736837246478,0.0,0.5889605807611338,0.0,0.09241198561922694,0.0,0.06930524626347084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182846381136068,0.04032456437015466,0.04234724284627495,0.0,0.0,0.034831141890927154,0.03782169463594053,0.11045225101889054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04625402511878138,0.0,0.18473613160956007,0.046533224611352134,0.0,0.0,0.047493785694232564,0.048950730744504636,0.0,0.07233306889736328,0.0,0.0,0.029213274693114768,0.0,0.1950742504229956,0.04597622077016356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13909237269367591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360928375182764,0.0,0.08975612805077476,0.04097437081641076,0.03816527321152181,0.0,0.040710659721230495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04580776507428669,0.06472138422050372,0.04349290393301637,0.0,0.04140128506863635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833091587743726,0.0,0.1287186585586341,0.07598713776026679,0.0,0.0,0.04990053298646761,0.0,0.04005661416094465,0.0,0.040577849573401714,0.0,0.04648851746384832,0.09629869215654713,0.0,0.0,0.18217259563903068,0.047859516205183625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04026268475183983,0.0,0.0,0.049788872072898234,0.0,0.05109778838616631,0.0,0.0,0.046319976107969736,0.03199511123167463,0.0663905171117927,0.045400204202040995,0.1599948265206954,0.0,0.11411600023889265,0.0,0.0,0.11553147609773927,0.0408829505969719,0.0,0.09070971679842976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045632675903919014,0.1369483085523422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03615619887883734,0.0,0.033299027878683315,0.033587676998566234,0.0698727708516072,0.04374880928176366,0.0,0.0,0.08876427372499644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030694899694947063,0.0,0.0,0.05314710116386245,0.15089323449925093,0.0,0.0,0.06280745532854883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334378958857843,0.0,0.0,0.050743800555289535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23215097660091835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05131347363953637,0.07736799136872782,0.04308849399676536,0.0,0.0,0.045843699482737935,0.0,0.0,0.047255389184805575,0.0,0.0,0.1124121980658976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034872389164349746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471000053528597,0.0,0.1981933645885948,0.0,0.0,0.09416332693980592,0.0,0.0,0.07918438787432194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060187569689524226,0.05804988532282835,0.0,0.0,0.052826916376320567,0.0,0.0,0.1298517054163232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054487566145822335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03595521269134224,0.03633508956311937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05057327403294839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893181417025132,0.04600202193686773,0.0,0.032178192569989966,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ITE_1415,2020/03/06,"My therapist asked me if I was sexually abused as a child. I was not. But what if? What if I repressed the memories in my head? I'm pretty sure I was not sexually abused. 

I am just so fucking nervous now. I recon I was badly handled at times (like that time where I was choked by my grandpa for crying, and another one where he punished (hit me on the butt and chest) me in public in the store for throwing food his way (it was merited lol))...",1.8035439560439563,3.5021767582417564,4.017678571428572,86.51794642857145,78.12087912087912,7.187362637362638,25.660714285714285,8.07648339933343,1.5323945054945065,339,13,73,6,8,117,61,91,0.237,0.685,0.077,-0.9463,0,0,0,0,3,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,5,8,2,2,4,1,7,5,3,0,1,11,11,8,0,3,7,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,2,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,5,0,1,6,0,15,3,9,4,0,12,0,0,0,2,6,7,2,3,4,53,19,0,0.0,0.5462035000072264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416966410010513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21548397166823294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19245571677383655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25319059117349524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27871839368812656,0.0,0.0,0.21309114944978014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236556850145894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260939592761313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561910162660577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23449874018805586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21724108934832656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26762526875741643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688097969702059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829581222331694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vv_Ninjay_vV,2020/03/06,Never felt so happy in ages. Please don't give up! I have been depressed for many years and genuinely despised everything about myself. I ended up having a huge breakdown in October and was on the verge of quitting college and just ending everything tbh. However i told my friends and family about whats going on and accepted that i need help urgently. Since then i have been on medication and have been to many counselling and therapy sessions. I can honestly say this has helped me soooo much and i feel much better about myself and my life every single day. Theres still times where im incredibly anxious and get depressed but thats just life really. Also last week i finally got the courage to come out as gay to my family and their reaction was amazing. Sorry for the random post i just wanted to share my experience and let people know that life can get better if you give it a chance too.,5.52657894736842,6.880163017543862,6.183874269005848,76.10809210526318,67.94736842105263,9.676608187134505,29.45467836257309,9.928628108626363,2.9747345029239765,720,26,127,17,12,235,112,171,0.051,0.758,0.191,0.9758,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,1,3,12,12,1,0,5,0,14,5,0,0,1,27,27,18,0,3,5,0,2,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,6,14,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,8,3,18,9,19,18,3,26,0,2,0,1,10,11,0,2,12,90,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339516941503298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460637288301443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22869742738859605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137404458598177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338296952505242,0.0,0.22271888994323205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290295664938849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089345116746416,0.0,0.23239953305749755,0.126472879028128,0.24377093366530345,0.0,0.06537417525636452,0.0,0.12414108042661424,0.14163361929352514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989106852181602,0.0,0.13509999486371005,0.2480583038222325,0.07347991005219175,0.0,0.10340702722222403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13763427559529787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733240812614675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13965809194131135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105577937347222,0.10539064789205388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13221034604252346,0.2739693594238001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26216461331006546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13024859637320507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19008973529944773,0.09586875408558117,0.09971835036904816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963514341719442,0.0,0.0,0.141924344512838,0.0,0.0,0.12382647989522373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13751849383508905,0.0,0.0,0.08282808932957393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028185892764704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695209608233414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14473237384431226,0.0,0.0,0.1032531613857324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14785724724747745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539149931978363,0.0,0.0,0.12354452909105347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626006921277648,0.0,0.1037106485855796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326013410097599
mentalhealth,studentmind47963714,2020/03/06,"Starting a Blog on Mental Health Hi everybody, Starting a blog trying to give me some mental releif. I'm a uni student, struggling with mental health, whilst i am struggling. I'd like to get some tips on how you cope with mental health wherever you are and whatever your struggles are. I'm new to this but i'm doing this to try and get my feelings out in the public eventually but if i could help somebody going through something at some point i'd be happy , 

Only a quick read but just setting out where i'm trying to go :) 

​

[https://studentmind47963714.wordpress.com/2020/03/06/whoami/](https://studentmind47963714.wordpress.com/2020/03/06/whoami/)",10.446805929919137,12.587568990566039,7.125148247978437,70.94990566037738,57.20754716981133,7.943935309973044,31.18059299191375,7.957251820313856,2.2126404312668457,547,17,79,5,7,151,67,106,0.051,0.816,0.133,0.8957,0,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,3,0,0,4,5,0,3,5,0,6,3,0,1,0,17,18,7,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,3,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,7,2,14,16,3,16,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,4,6,47,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14408263413033087,0.16158397656448414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061728690364389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723815145995403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895202319972338,0.1275655236788228,0.15115000080623026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415585624180664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42405120866191226,0.0,0.0,0.08913298547794186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496679675491893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5360460086592448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12843189620403775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011364818852294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570808804475336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301493355831034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023736906002948,0.0,0.0,0.1882463670529708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4170554064646024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708519292909341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158397656448414,0.0
mentalhealth,Duckdusk,2020/03/06,"Is this concerning? This happens mostly when I'm the passenger in a car and I'm not looking at the driver.

My mind often plays tricks on me and makes me believe the driver is someone else (it's always someone that I know very well) and no matter how much I try to tell my mind that it's impossible, I won't ever believe myself until I turn my head and see who the *real* driver is.

But as soon as I look away, it happens again and it's such a weird feeling.

Should I be concerned? Is this just something that happens to everyone?

Also I'm already diagnosed with BPD and bipolar 2.",2.5684033613445365,4.244063697478996,4.4207478991596645,84.56322268907564,75.89075630252101,6.440672268907564,27.026050420168072,7.1686216300943375,1.4439236974789913,456,18,89,5,10,155,76,119,0.057,0.9009999999999999,0.042,-0.3826,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,10,4,1,0,6,0,7,3,1,2,1,22,20,13,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,11,7,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,2,1,0,0,4,12,2,10,17,2,10,0,0,3,0,2,4,0,2,5,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17584850766679871,0.12743345647049156,0.13259333771346354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497161201673626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35906948071250805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20069782407788614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16173856983731325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331178555349139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441426899561681,0.0,0.15226732988749386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057298192902775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4227424119505251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16354076525879355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757549911659321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676305035518231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063684633749244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32179947973425965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714179756084166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18137706355789726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698263326161746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700362708789784,0.12267668494215132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928036530296095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818930984045258,0.17332883559293571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148179942781654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432762701939993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rosiegirl1099,2020/03/06,please share your advice Hey guys.. so i haven't really been feeling like my self. I had the flu for about a week and that really took all the life out of me. I dont feel 100% better i mean im not throwing up or feeling a 103 fever so i mean thats good. But ever since Ive gotten sick i have felt confused.. i dont even want to say depressed because i dont really know if thats what im feeling. I just feel a mixture of emotions... what kind of emotions you ask ? I am not sure. I am a 20 year old college student who is stressing over midterms.... one midterm that i have no idea about.... which is tomorrow. Oh and another thing is ive been feeling like i dont have purpose in life... like i dont know what my goals are or what im even aiming for... all i do know is writing my thoughts down make me feel sane and happy. My boyfriend makes me happy and very enlightened. Life is enlightening its just right now i dont feel that... anyone with advice that could help me feel better. (pls) thanks guys!,0.4866393795777704,2.487942715639812,2.243345540715211,96.06136471348559,83.92890995260662,5.163377854373117,20.96531667384748,6.351523495107088,0.08722559241706129,767,24,178,7,22,252,115,211,0.13,0.703,0.16699999999999998,0.9159,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,0,3,10,15,0,2,6,0,25,6,0,2,4,43,48,10,0,3,8,0,10,3,0,0,6,1,0,3,14,6,0,0,19,0,0,2,10,3,0,1,7,11,28,12,14,40,2,14,0,1,0,0,12,6,0,4,9,107,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610341147589584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640007678147311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057613656805126964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702974944211624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05022823594553853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457462904317906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578702412538938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709681179822728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5794095941144307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185370292570288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088444266961111,0.07453249150113485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3749600193672837,0.11772837320602285,0.07911371006211768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911040470503503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16317128513335216,0.0,0.1754255422401106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055228740818832604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930157938353116,0.2670075793372444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580343636284253,0.13584913974340218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17459758198392353,0.12076453045640907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11000081370607273,0.0,0.0,0.17950822481686302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646142853031279,0.0,0.05583410568748864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09044678364292368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15835622072161978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703662929320693,0.0,0.06552512700115616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595768092645636,0.0,0.0,0.06815936425650379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943850896044101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765787195902582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585976933604048,0.0,0.0,0.05474067614677994,0.0,0.0,0.06541374006027299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154571517155616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798586942832552,0.048599681783687634,0.0,0.06609362633511193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530607441659214
mentalhealth,arestingye,2020/03/06,"lethargy lately I've been curious about  lethargy specifically lethargy from conditions such as depression, anxiety and I am curious about other people's experience as my experience will definitely be different to everyone else . So if you experience lethargy or have experienced it, I would be really grateful if you could answer the questions below (if you don't feel comfortable sharing it, then you can message me your answers).

Thank you.

1. when did you begin to experience fatigue and how has it changed over time?
2. where does your lethargy come from?
3. does fatigue prevent you from doing things?
4. what do you feel mentally and emotionally when you experience fatigue?
5. do you find that because of lethargy, it affects your memory and communication?
6. how does it disrupt your day?
7. what is your sleep pattern like?
8. what do you do to make yourself feel better?
9. what makes you feel calm and feel comfortable?
10. (optional) what is your most recent experience with lethargy/fatigue?",3.7589461983103623,7.044577924855492,5.011936416184972,70.98076811916411,87.67052023121387,8.21067140951534,32.665406847487766,8.617729084823388,4.065210938194754,803,45,118,24,26,264,105,173,0.172,0.7190000000000001,0.109,-0.8911,1,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,18,0,1,9,11,0,0,1,0,19,4,1,5,0,30,29,17,0,5,4,0,5,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,13,7,0,1,9,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,2,6,22,7,14,22,1,12,0,4,0,0,21,3,0,7,9,87,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243421020034508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736565205249305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106863842921555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12782155283144545,0.10408388535085117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647249602832704,0.0,0.0,0.0779250091214829,0.0,0.10407024137667874,0.0,0.0,0.12624107395765036,0.0,0.0,0.3172160379175091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093751372774053,0.13591688521791065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154577320904499,0.0,0.7091664142946617,0.0,0.0,0.3054750407774245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043594223878564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13630089977615809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590311733947871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130921263660425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217676815901792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376793736389676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13535665421520196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740644946187518,0.0,0.11930451997054142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091672685637594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112435376622632,0.0,0.0,0.08027372772011533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045663287886747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583378535513128,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AvocadoVortex,2020/03/06,"How to develop an identity when there's none? Hello, everyone. 

I have a question that I think you guys might be able to help me with I have BPD obviously and I am currently incapable of developing on identity. I never really had a like a stable identity mainly because I grew up. You know all the time on the internet and I was pretty much you could say that I was educated by the internet. So when I came to real life later when I when I got older I still related a lot to you know, the previous education that I had via watching TV shows and movies in English. That's why my English is very good I'd say. About My native language, that's what I have trouble with. 

talking to people. I'm very very shy and I stutter a lot but only when I'm with people if I'm alone in my room I can talk very fluently, but it seems inauthentic to me. So I think it might it might be a coping mechanism because if I am capable of speaking fluently alone in my room then I should be able to speak the same way with friends or family (people who know me and therefore have a preconception of how I should express myself , but I'm worried that if I start speaking like that with people who know me, they will feel like I am faking it because to them it  won't seem ""authentic"". 

So basically I think it comes from fear of what people who've known me for years will think of me when I no longer stutter therefore breaking their expectations of you I should be. And I feel this is the thing that's stopped me from being fully myself and do the things I want to do. I've lost all my confidence because of this. 

This is going to be harder than I thought to explain. I am capable of speaking fluently and you know having an identity behind closed doors, but once I go out into the world with my family and friends I get this kind of mental block because the idea that I think they have of me is one that I have to keep up that shy stuttering guy . Listen, so, how do I switch from my inherited person to my ""real personality"" ? And I mean, how do I get that into the real world without seeming fake because all of a sudden I will be so confident and you know what I mean?

And as I already said this identity that I've created developed, but that's hidden from the world. I developed it by watching  TV shows and movies and listening to music internet culture. You know that all that jazz. So when I'm abroad for example, I was in France like three months ago and I could speak French with the locals but when I did that I changed into a whole persona, one which was perfectly comfortable using French mannerisms and the like in front of complete strangers! not perfectly but they were about they were able to understand what I was saying. Then when I went to London, same thing happened. I could be whoever I wanted to be because they were strangers. They didn't know me so Yeah, I just used my you know, my English that I know and for me it's kind of strange because whenever I switch to a different language, it seems like I'm I'm acting because I'm not just speaking the language. I also I also have an accent which I got from God knows where I had this mannerism which by the way come so easily to do they're like second nature. So it's like a different Persona. I dont know if I'm explaining myself correctly, but this is so hard. But then when I switch to my native language, I mean I can still do it but not with people that I know, because with them I get very very shy and I just get myself into a mental block, all of a sudden I develop a speech impediment . And yeah, I was wondering if anyone has any advice on how to overcome this or or any books on the subject about, you know, creating creating a new identity  when you have none. I really appreciate it. If someone, you know could have some insight into this and I imagine that some of you guys have also been going through this in. I would like to know how how did you overcome it? I know this is a long post but I am desperate. So if you reached all the way here, thank you so much for reading it. I really appreciate it. Thank you.

Might taking acting classes help?",3.3216110129290293,4.831439868198308,4.838989117291416,83.0306295228351,73.53446191051995,8.281491954236815,27.23335503674077,8.885622748486812,2.108404870244628,3229,120,650,66,65,1084,276,827,0.11,0.785,0.105,0.7236,3,2,0,0,0,0,70.0,0,17,9,3,44,27,0,1,36,2,73,1,0,11,11,158,145,78,0,18,28,0,3,9,2,12,1,13,3,5,58,39,0,4,41,7,2,11,11,8,0,4,23,18,121,19,84,97,18,72,0,1,2,0,57,26,0,24,39,484,179,3,0.14897360647317162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04852509469661828,0.0440187045284669,0.0,0.0,0.10286115214481363,0.05479869306884717,0.11913413927391375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06753810728293122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0347219364849736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30270975927673777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254234742821224,0.0,0.0,0.056795372927903175,0.0,0.0,0.05253144081777433,0.08555171396802405,0.05206533068188264,0.0,0.0,0.15859107023485602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376380756574777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819865242967678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04745022170292255,0.0,0.0,0.0936260385809727,0.05587890813675847,0.0502170210592489,0.03547559141025595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673109254410905,0.0,0.10377674763116583,0.0,0.08466513365681183,0.04165066436827016,0.07943186806302695,0.0,0.0,0.1475072920054849,0.0439122894037783,0.0,0.04448369666719172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656924546007728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05605768952616947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0441381954523684,0.0,0.10342205764373463,0.4639413226871834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035074821308318,0.21834293752580988,0.0,0.0,0.04394565126758402,0.0,0.0,0.05420742983131123,0.08443468858460604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227593055853795,0.0,0.0,0.10008690423918007,0.210716605818956,0.0,0.0,0.039636437131925266,0.0,0.07300849458708918,0.0,0.038299209747877774,0.047959879148362916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0528840096404595,0.06729891414230676,0.037767046910218434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065590824042632,0.08671867132833477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047558511630980266,0.050519904920500215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05562817782048235,0.0,0.04967130694893165,0.1695645786395477,0.0954363069939217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047236004789534686,0.11846979123020235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18082663503441515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042074951109030916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03514809514155179,0.0,0.07931367637768487,0.04151620186936606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03733653735791505,0.07982622790881136,0.0,0.091436587736828,0.0,0.0,0.09897144456957267,0.15909378622903972,0.0,0.0394228010087923,0.028955902649504886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05169559272499437,0.0,0.0857769097287154,0.0,0.24583765423714196,0.058578995247285326,0.1182483146677958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04603334190110888,0.04480850282660832,0.05544123715769999,0.0,0.04786841350153107,0.053851840477187884,0.0,0.050429976241483085,0.0,0.03527552525898723,0.0,0.0,0.03197803942572529
mentalhealth,CrowOfCrows,2020/03/06,"Not Feeling Well Not sure if I'm allowed to post this here, but I don't know where else I can. Just failed a midterm and have been feeling horrible for the past few months. Today I finally broke down and ended up crying for the most of the day so far. I'm studying Computing Science right now and it's really hard. I don't know whether I genuinely hate programming or I dislike it because I don't seem to understand it. Overall I lack the motivation to study, and work. But I also don't know how to find a fix to this problem as I have been aware of it for the past few months. I also don't have a lot of friends, and I don't feel I have a strong relationship with the ones I do have. Relationships with my family are weak as well, I rarely speak with them and don't really know what to talk about. I'm not sure if I'm depressed or just lazy, but I don't feel very good either way. Sorry for the rambling and formatting, but I just needed to tell someone.",2.868059701492537,3.960185557213933,4.312616915422886,88.01011940298508,74.02487562189054,7.9470646766169155,25.837810945273628,8.447377352677275,1.4970222885572135,751,25,168,13,15,250,104,201,0.282,0.664,0.054000000000000006,-0.9938,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,4,13,13,1,0,11,0,18,1,0,3,2,47,34,22,0,5,16,0,5,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,7,10,0,0,12,0,0,0,11,6,2,1,2,6,19,7,22,32,6,16,0,3,0,0,7,5,0,7,9,115,26,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21915637024577506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352866670131956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505146246614414,0.08836925866464926,0.0,0.1180187231697458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446611761915372,0.0,0.12136275020326387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291741995679346,0.0,0.2771341647400586,0.0,0.0,0.15010328860019231,0.1252376156974109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105864539518953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492937889475953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227467486160428,0.13528300693199816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012196175232664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649305555368075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21874278215085044,0.0,0.0,0.10160169127942853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285112878726813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616101637825756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13123128492211295,0.0,0.0,0.131113632206456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556239343250213,0.0,0.0,0.2942253732183011,0.0,0.1170178987711852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474166479302805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610014081004999,0.0,0.0,0.15338734821088398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582873310793782,0.0,0.0,0.11013484337191426,0.11976517059070227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298828983131343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14264700104054567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130592966481126,0.0,0.10876341403151776,0.0,0.0,0.2464023827631228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975523306229987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sineater225,2020/03/06,"Suggestions for medication? (this is an alt account). So to make a long story short, I'm mildly autistic, have (diagnosed) depression and anxiety. I am currently taking escitalopram and risperidone, but I dont think the ladder is helping much. I've had the dosage upped twice but I still have breakdowns almost once a week now. Does anyone have any suggestions for an antipsychotic that would be any better? I'm looking for something that could possibly calm me down day to day since I'm not a fan of my personality. Please tell me if this is the wrong subreddit or if theres somewhere I should look. I will obviously just take these suggestions to my doctor, and not self prescribe any meds. Feel free to ask any questions.",4.651516290726821,7.171122466165414,5.234755639097749,77.27263471177945,72.45864661654136,8.643859649122808,29.12844611528822,9.2995712137729,2.8721934837092737,580,24,101,14,12,186,94,133,0.075,0.799,0.126,0.8429,1,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,8,0,14,3,0,1,1,20,25,9,0,5,8,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,3,0,2,0,3,2,0,1,1,3,9,4,10,19,1,10,0,1,2,0,9,3,0,5,7,63,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576490641324568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4282465687428959,0.0,0.12043784300273867,0.0,0.0,0.11008266857040472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14718108254401255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13923904048684696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569955761572146,0.0,0.0,0.20306594266816375,0.0,0.1355990965359572,0.15979387297537906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16114206113319815,0.13777300016899707,0.0,0.1845134118436298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960419615781886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552579905983864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932559797445632,0.26441259330976635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050895203427086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174875518252565,0.15859985650776953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573331913576936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676638314353284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374667389135136,0.0,0.17281706906229646,0.0,0.1774850426994435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17636396129109372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423972067097892,0.0,0.0,0.13023239838424042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120165666361847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12572831520447475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367440346719488,0.0,0.13760569926871713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100878408948426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628538381227766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183777026412542,0.1721311710037766,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,caedose,2020/03/06,"I got a second dog and have slipped back into depression because of that I have a shih tzu and she means the world to me, I’ve had her for as long as I can remember and she’s been with me through all of my worst days, my mum’s death, she would comfort me when I would got drunk and threw up all the time, often stop me from hurting myself, she is the reason why I’m alive today and was able to get out of being numb or suicidal all the time. She’s always been enough but my dad and I had always thought about getting a second dog then we got the opportunity to rescue one from a friend of his who wasn’t able to care for his husky anymore.

At first, I was excited, I love animals and so I assumed that getting him would help me have a reason to stop staying at home in my room all day (my brother takes our shih tzu out) since I know how much exercise huskies need, I thought forcing myself out of the house would do good but it hasn’t. We got him and he instantly bonded to me but my shih tzu was not a fan of him. As he’s bonded to me he sleeps in my room and follows me literally everywhere, which means I don’t get to see my shih tzu very much who used to be the one to follow me around all the time and sleep in my room. He is poorly trained and I have been left with the responsibility of getting him lessons and training him until he’s more comfortable with my siblings. The poor dog is very anxious and only trusts me at the moment, so of course it’s my responsibility to do this.

He trusts me and I care about him a lot but I’m not happy unlike everyone else in my house who’re all ecstatic to have him. I feel like I’ve strayed way too far away from my comfort zone. I know this is probably a really stupid thing to cause me to spiral and I’m an awful person for thinking like this but I just needed to vent and see if getting this off my chest will help me get through this, I don’t want to have to make him move away from another home. 

I don’t know if this is the wrong place to talk about this and I’m sorry if it is.",6.116525775447791,4.203210584862386,6.742922673656619,83.69836391437309,67.00458715596329,9.956138051550896,30.853647881170826,8.418075326091056,1.9066427697684576,1589,44,373,18,21,526,189,436,0.10099999999999999,0.745,0.154,0.9853,0,0,0,0,0,1,24.0,3,0,0,3,12,21,1,0,21,1,35,7,3,6,6,74,73,35,2,10,12,3,1,2,1,5,2,0,5,1,16,27,1,2,14,2,2,4,7,6,0,5,16,3,66,15,61,50,12,44,0,2,2,1,36,23,0,7,17,253,82,0,0.17445200861181126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451580462240615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146407089016136,0.0,0.09854055697064916,0.08650475794491902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07764963681907135,0.0,0.0,0.16390340469975545,0.0670714131713176,0.0,0.053172162622378616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17786544939663895,0.08960513393087167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250711350003008,0.0,0.07512762969516036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728661340011765,0.0,0.0,0.09012777942869236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334818510258725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04410408862524879,0.06231427490471874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419439470317837,0.0,0.0,0.06739059455328371,0.0,0.319003909904909,0.0,0.0,0.07316103400204976,0.2790504155622813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092853703544596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693150408197882,0.0,0.1749895885850004,0.0,0.0,0.2012941955630027,0.09337724166060313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381139242832655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477130889821056,0.0,0.0,0.085228439496407,0.0,0.0,0.07719226896844494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415642962944896,0.0787248744166589,0.0,0.058224035195215774,0.0,0.0,0.19002937973704712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927074384170444,0.12824229903505707,0.1293539539122833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821319588883245,0.06633930682893104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616238249608953,0.09113260939101693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404438555760566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05587921190785359,0.17936571979394714,0.0,0.0,0.0988100591852645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13901566448591834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215425213050257,0.0,0.17457799576608565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764237052230712,0.0,0.09297131480092873,0.0,0.14584969064332845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541109135728497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655830998278665,0.07010895819876782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794908141491445,0.05589090152753798,0.0,0.13849540835932087,0.15258655369115692,0.0,0.08268005301301835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533526180718084,0.0,0.14394117719707886,0.051448157287467385,0.06923594218172284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870790174900125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247851403290364,0.09536794274095246,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jeohtel,2020/03/06,"How do I deal with my passive aggressive brother? So as of late, my older brother has been really passive-aggressive with me.  Just this morning, I asked him why he wasn't paying more rent, because I know our mom makes less money than he does, but she pays more rent. He responded with ""because it's none of your business"". It hurt a lot, and I'm not really sure why. It's been going on for a year, and I'm getting tired of it. 
How would you all recommend I deal with it? I'm trying to tell him, but I'm afraid he's going to be dismissive of my feelings, like he always is.",3.4577500000000008,3.933160608333335,5.108333333333333,85.15500000000003,72.08333333333334,8.333333333333334,27.5,8.472884824447931,1.767,443,15,96,7,8,151,75,120,0.10800000000000001,0.825,0.067,-0.7165,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,2,0,0,4,5,1,1,2,0,8,1,0,3,2,19,19,8,0,1,4,3,1,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,6,6,0,0,2,0,5,2,3,3,0,0,3,1,14,2,14,14,6,6,0,1,0,0,19,1,0,1,4,59,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16591159293729862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864062623597271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24309718765386926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4111324509561934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17449083517855635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081948316620268,0.1424469518722535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417501715702207,0.0,0.2266401534095011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134551588561368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10958160350493693,0.0,0.22492486187330116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741372612981024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695174561301741,0.0,0.0,0.13309689235641325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335275780406133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554735145829232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879262721160756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17427894697273835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291738110203328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537528388648298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35984373434655925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164361604927966,0.0,0.0,0.12840305297146984
mentalhealth,grumpy-bagel,2020/03/06,I don’t want to be alive Last day here,-2.299999999999997,-1.1199790000000007,0.1100000000000012,112.085,89.0,4.0,10.0,3.1291,-2.4730000000000003,30,0,10,0,1,10,10,10,0.0,0.606,0.39399999999999996,0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5396361827291406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6820650217636053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4935383433697265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angry_afro,2020/03/06,"I just discovered that people actually like being with me, and I don't know how to feel. My little cousin (she's 11) and other family members came to visit my family and me. I spend most of my time alone in my computer. She left yesterday, and the day before, she told me, with a kind of angry-dissapointed voice ""I just want to do anything at all with you"". And I thought, wow, I'm an ASSHOLE! She just wanted to spend some time with me and I neglected her. I wonder how much this happens. Because apparently people genuinely and wholeheartedly enjoy my company, but I don't understand why. I don't know what there's about me to like so much. I'm so replaceable. And because I don't understand it, I just don't spend time with the people I love. It seems pointless. They could be with someone that's actually worth it. I moved with my dad last year, and everyone else in my previous house was kind of upset with me because they would miss me. I'm not playing the victim card here, I genuinely don't get it. And I've come to the conclussion that people love me, and I know it, but I don't feel it all. Compliments, hugs, ""I love you""s and ""I missed you""s make me confused and a bit upset, because it doesn't make sense to me that someone could say that to me and mean it. I realized that when I'm with my friend, I get so anxious about her being bored because I don't understand that she might just... like being there with me. I don't know what to do and I'm thinking isolating myself would be best(?",2.808289473684212,4.434404460526316,4.4070052631578935,85.12483684210528,75.11842105263158,8.021894736842105,24.988947368421048,8.726425361277474,1.7143362105263162,1172,39,245,24,25,393,129,304,0.084,0.762,0.154,0.9772,1,1,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,1,2,1,16,23,1,3,7,0,23,4,0,4,2,67,57,23,0,6,8,2,2,3,1,3,0,2,0,0,19,27,0,1,15,1,4,4,11,8,0,0,4,4,53,15,27,43,8,17,0,3,0,4,19,5,0,6,11,168,72,1,0.0,0.0,0.19957115276730786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059047544289773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551840390219432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414668584731977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3116667668112851,0.0,0.08701099122325083,0.0,0.10730971900294638,0.0,0.11163535734339047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695183064182793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808313994000433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16328368871666354,0.0,0.0,0.06594565008921968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854204579018818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097708492900678,0.0,0.0,0.19279275834119292,0.0,0.10340582761404908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900152140538444,0.0,0.10684744185874567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042325754185726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798788692223612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129645135974983,0.22478544911845288,0.08335101074179663,0.0,0.0,0.1110997408194474,0.0,0.0,0.14986905291136415,0.1024858052285578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27686585461624325,0.0,0.13651125630434324,0.0,0.0,0.11138505462418972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084757944473857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868027992766267,0.15033754783515424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835613956737941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131682944028673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308859553982557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17327969877451227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06552051191509893,0.0,0.08117859799704953,0.17887614684975942,0.0,0.0,0.097708492900678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31935141334368183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206246279961153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922687212661434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108905708786114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14527723098596826,0.0,0.0,0.06584850241097262
mentalhealth,GalaxyKitten97,2020/03/06,"What to do when my family gets worried about me Basically to make a really long story short,  I don't have the best luck with relationships. I ended my last one because I felt it was for the better but my parents act all concerned because I didnt go further with it. I know it's true because every now and then they still ask if I talk to him or regret leaving him, the answers always no.

The last guy that wanted to hook up with me was for the completely wrong things and I didnt want to involved with any of that. Ever since then I stayed to myself and pretty much stayed single.

If theres any advice on what I can say to my parents when they ask if I'm ever getting married or date, anything can help.",4.585563165905633,4.726810965753426,5.688721461187214,83.17081430745817,69.47945205479452,7.858751902587517,27.86605783866057,7.3871296695380915,1.4569445966514465,555,17,114,5,9,185,93,146,0.10800000000000001,0.79,0.10300000000000001,0.0756,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,2,8,6,0,0,6,0,9,0,0,1,4,25,20,13,0,6,6,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,8,7,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,5,2,20,4,17,15,4,21,0,1,0,0,14,4,0,6,13,84,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036911516296344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195248995908262,0.0,0.0,0.19536828147080432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182083397946164,0.0,0.2685790594520749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626956299201034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507475142892883,0.12704312907123694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15060999765534264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272276348249948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598718886011297,0.1210278697493014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354165743930068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792259479056646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500981124359567,0.0,0.08163727772102584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14223202920981118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628282171027247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789440323249697,0.2341811682962401,0.0,0.15210027179671562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712210501097332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588475653273612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559626775219784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733818232241588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31900355470293323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461395262831267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202324454259006,0.0,0.0,0.15422194321309593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423298860444007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11882537641265002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30621484252427483,0.11471580470952834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545713664663697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543195596346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16945215215767367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458793885300666,0.0,0.0,0.1570542464136105,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NewWestern3,2020/03/06,"Fear Manipulation Hi All, 
Do you have a better word/name for the behavior of fear/aggression based Manipulation?
Thanks!",3.649000000000002,5.6136459000000025,5.440000000000001,63.18500000000003,115.0,9.6,24.0,8.238735603445708,3.8053000000000012,98,4,15,4,5,33,18,20,0.307,0.467,0.226,-0.2714,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,2,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418128189274814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8698016794925818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35582163392454497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,insomniaparatus9,2020/03/06,"Is this a thing with my mental illness or... Something else? My brain has been doing this thing recently where it will lag or skip moments. Sometimes it feels like 10 minutes but it’s a second or two and sometimes it’ll be a minute or two and feel like a second. Background: Diagnosed anxiety and depression and accidentally fell off my SSRI antidepressants a few weeks ago (so this could also be a withdrawal from those thing) 

Help?",4.655035714285717,7.040664575000001,5.092142857142857,78.91000000000003,72.0,8.071428571428571,28.92857142857143,8.841846274778883,2.546232142857144,346,14,60,7,7,110,55,80,0.163,0.726,0.11199999999999999,-0.6608,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,6,0,9,3,1,0,0,13,11,11,0,1,5,0,2,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,11,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,1,2,3,2,3,5,1,7,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,4,6,48,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17465055862268186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756062639058074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072339925129352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199447879748113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730823581583522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16969713385550272,0.19997598025589733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16458890218291014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19924327338377168,0.2815090504657796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320615410112099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19251268759846266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19855461358345056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19453817755384148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167928312045048,0.3897250436837795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3926834800554201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3849291160802351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804137511419844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,forgetthestigma,2020/03/06,"Forgetthestgma On Twitter Hi everyone, I am a teenager who has dealt and is still dealing with Mental Illness. I am trying my best to remove the stigma and educate others on things around Mental Illness. I am trying to grow my account to reach more people and eventually try to end the stigma. I am sharing my thoughts and My story. It would mean the world to me if you guys could follow it. Forgetthestigma is the handle. Thanks",2.764125,5.710647162500003,4.3450000000000015,78.16000000000003,83.625,5.7,24.25,7.1686216300943375,1.4906,343,13,56,5,10,114,54,80,0.063,0.8079999999999999,0.129,0.6808,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,5,0,9,2,0,0,0,11,13,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,10,3,9,10,2,9,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,2,46,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20309953809223627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394265995451693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18215711826414005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352099306754628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20207086078956046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180045984581352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259017753006762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485193803190412,0.0,0.0,0.4598377960420865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15816866673230853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18219879223336388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21004745477007428,0.0,0.0,0.15157098153159496,0.0,0.0,0.18112353526658845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.464691284729118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16206935275524034,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadkhaki,2020/03/06,"Sorry this is super long but basically: how the hell can I make my brain actually believe that I'm in a better place now Before I begin I just want to say that I already know therapy etc is an option. I am not looking for something to replace or equate therapy, I'm not looking for a unrealistic quick fix and I'm well aware there is none. Just wondering if there are people out there that feel what I do, or have overcome it! 

Quick backstory: had an overall nice childhood but ever since I was younger I've felt a little ""off"". As I grew up I enjoyed being different, I enjoyed attention and being seen. I can't recall ever questioning myself or my self esteem at all during this time. Then, as I got older, I completely changed. Probably because of puberty but also other things. I completely changed from a kid that lived to stick out to one that would die to fit in. I was awkward, I felt awkward, I think many relate. 

I went to a new school, where I did not fit in. I can't say I was bullied, I was at times picked on and kind of an outsider. That's not to say I didn't have friends, I did, and I honestly don't know if other people also saw me as an outsider or if it was mainly in my head. Anyways, kids suck, they can be rude, and they were. This caused me to subconsciously avoid and feel threatened by certain people, such as kids my age, popular kids etc. I mean, I was there and I lived it, but I haven't given it much thought. I've come to the conclusion ""this really hurt my self esteem and those people are assholes"". 


Now I've changed A LOT as a person, I'm a lot more mellow and insightful and I'm happy with who I am. I feel wiser and more stable, I love my life and myself a lot more! And it's great! But recently it feels like everything from that earlier period of my life has been let loose, like it's bleeding into my life. I have never been diagnosed with anything and I have never gone to see a professional, but I'd have suicidal thoughts at times, but generally just really depressing thoughts. I'm in a new school now, and it's quite great, more specifically, people are really nice and mature. Like there is literally not one rude person. 

But my brain still feels like there is, it's like it's completely ingrained in my brain that I'm unlovable and unlikeable, I'll get these thoughts that my ~friends secretly hate me~ and I 100% know they don't, but the feeling of that thought is unavoidable. Being in a room, like in a class, causes my brain to just completely bombard me with self deprecating thoughts. And the thoughts are so primitive, I know they're not true. Things like ""you're ugly, you're really annoying, you could literally just disappear and no one would notice"", just imagine the most primitive insults you can think of and that's it. 

I feel quite confident, I have a genuine love for myself. I am not afraid of doing things, these thoughts about my self worth don't show themselves physically, only as thoughts in my head. I really don't know how to put words to the feeling but, it's like there's two parts of my head, myself and some nasty bastard that hates me. I get that from reading this it doesn't seem like I have good self esteem at all lol, but I feel a genuine tenderness for myself and I trust myself fully. I feel like I actively like myself, while a part of my brain hates me. 

And I know why this is, it's because of these previous instances in my life were I were led to believe I was unworthy of respect, all of those things. It's so deeply ingrained in me, and I don't know how to get rid of it. Feeling more confident has not made them decrease, it has only made me loathe those thoughts more as I know I don't deserve them. It is seriously messing things up for me, for example, i notice that if I meet a person that is similar to those that were mean to me, I'm scared of them. I guess in a way it's a prejudice, but even if i know they're a nice person my body physically reacts to them because of fear. 

I don't want to loath or fear people, and I don't want to loath myself, so my question after this fucklong post is: is there a way to feel worthy again? Is there a way to clearly tell my body and brain that the danger is over? No matter how much I'm loved or reassured, it's like I ""forget"" it after a while, like that love and reassuring doesn't stick in my brain. 

If anyone has read this far thank you??? Also I'm very sorry I'm on mobile :')",3.7568917785234888,4.804676184563764,4.997186101789708,84.11510801174498,71.82997762863533,8.272063758389264,27.16785514541387,8.660442795831766,1.8522304809843408,3455,118,716,60,64,1147,313,894,0.141,0.653,0.20600000000000002,0.9968,1,2,1,0,0,0,114.0,0,3,7,5,40,66,12,7,34,1,74,23,12,12,10,159,154,72,2,12,38,0,14,13,2,2,7,3,1,13,63,35,0,1,46,3,1,7,27,24,1,4,37,22,108,42,85,109,22,72,1,2,5,4,41,33,3,23,41,496,171,6,0.0,0.0,0.041142583604777135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04652517973451295,0.10114725245858756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029479614297810926,0.0,0.03469451380656042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710198091794195,0.0,0.035875495343869634,0.09500093204647547,0.0,0.0372875518195156,0.0,0.09366166164328216,0.0,0.3294555679742691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662093077478121,0.13380071251093234,0.036317552901829614,0.17681800293069666,0.0,0.0,0.03366174279784091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03631279216723435,0.04279203805324545,0.043755961146302334,0.04404876764915327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404024386121597,0.027846624354368115,0.07627320409603999,0.0,0.0,0.03789115483572237,0.0,0.0,0.09488460760057754,0.2558114947279557,0.12047792924379863,0.08096141740103986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514622287351063,0.0,0.06608139125330724,0.0,0.0,0.03536224200385678,0.033719617488298916,0.09296423933753828,0.04644456353010843,0.0,0.0,0.044880655125874566,0.0,0.12487434830356213,0.1298065635905606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045133706245353934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04390369141051068,0.2085328617069417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04311198587083455,0.11911688211068865,0.2677674917701506,0.042255914759736384,0.07445701919500818,0.037310731502407095,0.07080843303930813,0.0,0.0,0.10753009357242324,0.1522060533352839,0.07978660260408016,0.028142472985778325,0.042744147652488136,0.0,0.09185032723725567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061985663208117076,0.0,0.06503358081810946,0.08143778154050953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600005781282622,0.0,0.0,0.08570717386839627,0.06412994716250299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913114644406141,0.0,0.1753727670581577,0.14725175159998785,0.04404876764915327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040378121769388965,0.0,0.04545616893685362,0.0,0.0,0.042382965160726635,0.09445885755522583,0.0896858005543671,0.08434385398731277,0.0,0.13504553629018914,0.0,0.04162842500404499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058320776319468,0.042210033238338864,0.0853373896290298,0.03359647411312062,0.03838135192929488,0.21991307444841232,0.0,0.0,0.03487561596484058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03245722634725225,0.0,0.0943904957970752,0.0,0.0,0.03366944394313101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04611676349918552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03685015082122504,0.03881574030809255,0.09642845276546667,0.0,0.14004787308213765,0.05402951482547808,0.0,0.3347074172494651,0.07375241085315994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04118469968750607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03478684255761424,0.07460209714645112,0.10039516975907656,0.0,0.0,0.037907368739786194,0.03908322235055145,0.03804330962826448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04572128306212896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059899244342991376,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Brackd,2020/03/06,"What's wrong with me I'll try to keep this concise. 

This entire ongoing year I've had weird sensations in public, where basically everyone's faces look a bit weird and I start to feel uneasy. At the same time I feel 'numb' in a way when this is happening. It usually happens in crowded places like subways, but also when I'm walking in the city with a friend or whoever.

I also feel a bit derealized at random moments, and I'll have thoughts and sensations like 'how the hell am I conscious, why am I in this world?' and the like. When I'm home though, I feel at ease and rarely thoughts like this come up.

I think it might have something to do with anxiety, and I am quite an anxious person, paranoid even. But when these sensations happen, my heart doesn't start racing and I don't start sweating or anything like that. It almost feels like my brain numbs my sensations to avoid nervousness in certain situations. 

Last summer I also had a really strong experience like this; I was walking outside and I thought that I had died and I was living in some kind of a purgatory. I wasn't a 100% convinced, but nevertheless it was a strong feeling. This was probably due to the weed I was smoking at the time, although I only smoked once every 2 weeks or so. I've since quit and haven't smoked weed in ~6 months.

I hope I've been descriptive enough but as you might know, it's pretty hard to describe emotions and feelings, atleast for me. Hopefully some of you know/have gone through what I'm going through yourself and can help me with advice. Thanks.",4.2715418946156065,5.835188506622515,4.808353008926002,83.97582061618198,71.21854304635761,8.033630866685863,29.355600345522603,8.587818076936951,2.171666973797869,1227,49,240,21,23,391,159,302,0.115,0.695,0.19,0.9828,0,1,3,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,0,4,12,24,1,2,15,0,23,6,4,1,1,50,52,31,1,2,7,0,8,7,1,2,2,0,1,1,17,17,0,2,13,0,0,5,4,8,0,0,14,9,26,16,29,36,6,39,1,0,1,0,7,16,1,11,24,146,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946987552859844,0.0,0.0,0.09704077703622728,0.0,0.0,0.2324952639833381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413543450998965,0.10948005077632984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974818841008459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21159995598166254,0.0,0.0,0.10818295304987452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347887702235696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005766690669069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901004423616073,0.0,0.10013332755111268,0.0,0.06400775229128823,0.0,0.08165035881908257,0.09260109560639188,0.0,0.09479599986064792,0.0,0.0,0.3430021716339529,0.06923210290653019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487197089557868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05507585180787113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570900175029765,0.0,0.08681179771496504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483811917423865,0.0649563357352481,0.0,0.09720804119932662,0.19250582372840105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861375376192739,0.0,0.10091623920787056,0.10651775627069954,0.07899410466228722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314153034726229,0.0,0.08557278577707017,0.0,0.08137949836284833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20561114217189969,0.0,0.0,0.07735216765328806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032053604180298,0.0,0.07370397431649557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461756011184038,0.10124970885317533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985917110115616,0.10448473626084864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20615017579426365,0.0,0.0,0.06208265048507167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016446658941072,0.10893023882006048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460559950316957,0.0,0.0,0.20577894065255314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922116587727917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062095637829531126,0.09521300471811596,0.2308057434257736,0.11301731428795532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579512907678661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067320254586374,0.0,0.0,0.07692218005079657,0.07773488438323431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744567054299926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059552283312491,0.0,0.06240648367685438
mentalhealth,Chazxjwh,2020/03/06,"Girlfriend tried to kill herself because I was angry. Cant stop blaming myself So I was dating this girl for a while. Near the end of the relationship things became unhealthy. During the breakup she said one of the reasons is because she is interested in another guy. I was really torn up about this and I said several things about how angry and disappointed I was. I told her I couldn't stand her. I regret saying this. She kicked me out, and I just found out she tried to kill herself after that. She deleted me on social media and I'm doing my best not to reach out to her because I know that would make it worse.

I am dealing with an incredible amount of guilt for this. I can't stop shaking knowing that I caused someone I love to resort to that. I can't forgive myself and I don't know what do to. I wan't to talk to her and tell her how sorry I am but I am forcing myself to wait a few weeks, and even then I doubt she will talk to me. I really going through it right now and I need any advice I can get.",1.8597443609022584,3.6976896761904783,3.5548120300751904,89.26229323308272,78.42857142857143,5.944862155388472,22.4812030075188,6.8360192770164,0.5764285714285715,792,24,168,8,19,264,115,210,0.132,0.794,0.07400000000000001,-0.8646,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,8,11,2,3,7,0,19,1,0,5,0,33,33,14,2,4,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,0,2,13,12,0,3,6,0,0,2,6,7,0,1,8,3,43,4,28,22,3,20,0,2,0,1,28,8,0,1,9,131,56,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13969063620684946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721198107436774,0.14989720298696152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614258815387948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001887098329442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685065751818135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14737680905556602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661267566702974,0.0,0.0,0.0944181749035492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673903648904772,0.0,0.0,0.07468630401810163,0.0,0.08124268112544393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415445457944444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163095016118737,0.0,0.23568736087150574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901938833149346,0.0,0.095421294257263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599679031365596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686769486329444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18315689403682506,0.1469780398313098,0.0,0.15347650613514888,0.0,0.12207987409265993,0.2719593893499289,0.11368083951685665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614946035850076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457211404721202,0.12112241563955607,0.0,0.0,0.16002259785579678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390278551039243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297981411946,0.12494598775003098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18994136463028946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659636728744476,0.0,0.1941094877602553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466714026142025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567987969225388,0.101548705814316,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scarymoviepussyfro,2020/03/06,"Five years later, I’m finally being seen. I’ve been trying to get into therapy through the VA for years now. They gave me the run around multiple times, put me on a wait list, wouldn’t return my phone calls with open appointment times as they promised, etc. I had given up for a little while. I finally got in contact with someone a little over half a year ago that once again, had promised to return my call with their availability. To my surprise, they called me back last month and gave me a date. That date is today. I never thought this day would come! Before anyone says anything about why I didn’t just see a civilian doctor, I had bad experiences with two pervy doctors when I was a teenager so I’ve been anti-doctors for a really long time. The idea of being alone in someone’s establishment at my most vulnerable trips me out due to those experiences. Yes, I’m aware not all doctors are like that but guess what? I am a product of my past. Alas, I bit the bullet and decided to go so I can be a better human for my tiny humans. I don’t know what to expect, but I do know that even if it helps me get one more good day a year, it’s one more day that I woke up and chose life. I hope this reaches someone who feels the weight of the world on their shoulders and prompts them to find the strength to make it through today & kickstart their path towards happiness. Even if existing is all you do, tomorrow you will have pulled through another day! If that person is you, I send you all of my love and all of my light.",4.20810606060606,5.033120568181818,4.879999999999999,86.19833333333338,70.5909090909091,7.944588744588746,27.329004329004327,8.11559375814309,1.549312121212122,1197,39,252,16,21,385,177,308,0.026000000000000002,0.838,0.136,0.9876,0,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,4,7,2,11,11,0,0,18,1,23,7,1,1,5,41,45,15,0,7,7,0,2,1,0,3,4,1,0,3,15,14,1,1,7,0,0,7,5,1,0,5,14,6,39,10,38,25,9,56,0,0,2,1,26,16,0,6,34,168,54,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558179833139483,0.0,0.0,0.09999206556952887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460705512115807,0.0,0.0,0.1012364194257694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750688821409541,0.0,0.07944875538469251,0.08594600179904922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423756289444776,0.08061149539979934,0.0,0.0,0.08215314587693734,0.0,0.0,0.08538668678050675,0.10540272749363748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29575138044251154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316543626336942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490555519740566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952738155343845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767380071246034,0.12753484075060148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188880132690853,0.0,0.0,0.0488163272310382,0.0,0.0,0.21152184572075014,0.0882408769089034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088212252492446,0.0,0.05486905677889727,0.0809778205996208,0.0772162900575563,0.0,0.1063557998658179,0.0,0.0,0.10277452540424736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471244214323857,0.0,0.0,0.09589150803576384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898816608403422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061178107088756,0.07869750301880493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819297196211077,0.04716727543334283,0.1935279943117636,0.0,0.08543976713108346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871361216280961,0.0,0.06444489940494955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706173104221478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744618743328752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281785201285147,0.13084351663107313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216364481192194,0.0,0.08429984390372673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970549364175207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06184954680924255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677689056681823,0.0,0.0,0.07693429769569947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245408174946701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040824204372178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664637661954106,0.16888944694754765,0.0,0.1830277713097318,0.0,0.0,0.06554808604109763,0.0,0.09431096654958666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756646142278901,0.0,0.0,0.08711733553990822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858318346911638,0.0,0.0,0.2486886563775148
mentalhealth,RosalinaTheWatcher51,2020/03/06,"Need Advice/Venting (Long Post) Ok, this problem isn’t as serious as others on this sub but it is really eating at me, and I just want to know if anyone else has dealt with this, and how they overcame it. It’s kind of strange and I’m really bad at explaining things so please bear with me.

So there is this person in my life who is very special to me. She reminds me on a daily basis that life isn’t so bad and she lifts me up whenever I need it, and I do the same for her. I’ve known her for a long time and I have very specific feelings toward her.

Now, there is another person in my life, who I detest, and who always finds a way to make me hate him even more every time I see him. However I usually have a good time blocking him out of my mind, but back in November, something happened that cause me to think about him constantly. It became so bad that I began to subconsciously associate him with things that I love, even though they have no correlation at all. I know it’s all in my head but it’s like I can feel him haunting me, and it’s diving me insane.

Then came December. I was having a pretty bad day and then my thoughts turned to Person #2 again. I tried to block him out and I happened to be thinking about Person #1 again, and then I started getting these intrusive thoughts where I would imagine his last name as hers, and think her name when I see his, and basically it’s like their identities melded together.

The only thing is that these two people could not be any more different. They have completely different personalities, they look nothing like one another, they sound nothing like one another, and they don’t even know that each other exists. There is ZERO connection between the two, and I have two very different emotions associated with each of them. But, my brain being my brain, decided to equivocate my emotions towards Person #1 and I began to believe false things like “she’s always reminded you of him” and “she’s just like him” or “Person #1 (Insert P2’s last name here)”. I these thoughts are complete absurdity whipped up by my brain, but my brain keeps telling me these things and I’ve spent every single day of the past three months fighting against it. And I’ve ended up gaslighting myself into subconsciously linking the two, and I don’t want them to be linked. I know they aren’t linked, there is no logical reason for them to be linked and I want to break this link, but I don’t know how. I can still see P1 as herself, but it’s just that subconscious feeling lying to me, and I want it to stop. How can I get P2 to stop haunting my every thought, it’s driving me fucking insane.

Sorry for the novel, I don’t realize I had so much to vent. Has anyone dealt with this before?",5.141843137254902,5.5943704740740765,5.834858387799564,81.51774509803924,68.33333333333333,9.019607843137257,29.400871459694986,9.007467420416297,2.2321034858387803,2136,73,428,36,34,697,230,540,0.126,0.777,0.096,-0.9692,5,0,1,0,2,0,60.0,0,1,11,0,29,20,3,0,11,1,36,11,5,6,2,100,78,48,0,10,13,0,3,6,0,1,3,1,0,7,40,33,1,5,28,1,1,2,10,9,0,8,10,8,86,11,57,61,9,51,0,0,4,2,50,18,1,2,34,311,126,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379854279632317,0.0,0.0,0.042415728845439336,0.19621035533842787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872252008345762,0.0639084340404453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04796093038980894,0.2083151530707016,0.0,0.0,0.05307476642666425,0.07027292906136395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785152555381675,0.0,0.07133801152269997,0.0,0.06407417687847146,0.0,0.0,0.13079365337849727,0.06740297510541864,0.0,0.049799706439876204,0.0,0.0,0.08045075515481756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19549929822173512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382307517749368,0.052104576530667183,0.14032229418189496,0.055243899570156116,0.0,0.0,0.1235901890033442,0.0,0.15765564197158574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094612877131062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570077247953426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057662765439968115,0.06517455944605023,0.0,0.0,0.052315451443615726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103123457416666,0.0,0.0,0.06158035176347752,0.06401261712840436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554399228924737,0.0,0.06495180469415811,0.17139264592251152,0.10168451972226504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216752761668027,0.182833567714386,0.0,0.0,0.11039615429514196,0.0523775491958686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056294001323629134,0.0,0.04163441273972896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297887519283595,0.0,0.04978547482072936,0.0,0.045851277662356485,0.0924974692778148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969701027365498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453101837439284,0.04743742119766693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05954201594118137,0.04324153371724819,0.3812314347873813,0.0,0.06846674300487578,0.0,0.0,0.05973602207067305,0.06345568967245457,0.0,0.059682466965856926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991538766909513,0.06412975658782052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14910944079422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048017726047430084,0.0,0.0698213846151515,0.044147878373681934,0.0,0.04981109963413239,0.10429311877554448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545166869161592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20718900411379876,0.11989815828417215,0.061281083553425826,0.19806854591428508,0.1091104650100316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04234712279378195,0.06784383314193983,0.2437171440076258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869496650506038,0.15439258963001434,0.14715667219031356,0.049508725796021766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044307937384078566,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChannelOrangeJuice,2020/03/06,"Brain Fog/ Feel like a failure I'm posting in hopes of getting responses from people who've gone though/go through similar experiences.

I haven't gone to a doctor or therapist but I believe I may have moderate to severe OCD and anxiety but I just don't know. These last three years I've been doing everything very slowly. My schoolwork, thought processing, chores, showers, you name it. It feels like my brain is all fogged up. I overthink every single thing before I do it. An essay that would have taken someone else 1-2 hours takes me 8 hours. Yesterday, I was solving a physics problem and what takes me 3-4 minutes in my head took me an hour and a half all because the way I wrote a number seemed wrong. I know I'm being ridiculous when I do this but I can't stop.

I study all the time and understand my work but I'm a blank slate when a test comes around. It's like I never studied it before and yet I'm able to solve it when I leave the class or go home. I constantly feel like a failure. I'm literally failing school as of now and I'm so tired of this. I'm anxious all the time and I'm so worried about my future and it looks like I have good reason to be.

During high school, my grades weren't the best but I've been really trying these past 2 and a half years. I want to be able to go to post-secondary this fall but I don't know with the way things are going. This is seriously affecting my life. Everything I do has to be perfect or I don't know. I'm posting this because I flunked my Physics test an hour ago, came home early and broke down. I solved the exact same problem during my review last night (and I got it right). I'm so tired of living like this. I'd like to know if there's anyone else who feels this way because I'm completely lost.",1.8925679134670967,3.7123664196185295,3.312395343076542,91.12244653620678,78.26430517711172,6.301345883907193,23.38279250268351,7.229369725052465,0.7891805631244329,1384,45,301,17,33,453,183,367,0.174,0.708,0.11800000000000001,-0.9786,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,0,5,12,20,1,0,19,0,26,7,3,2,7,57,67,28,0,6,11,0,4,7,0,2,4,0,4,0,22,15,0,1,13,0,0,9,7,9,0,3,13,5,36,11,23,48,7,45,0,4,1,0,4,7,0,7,31,168,58,10,0.16189770076659965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175627169064848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061925648976477475,0.09144915975893264,0.0,0.0566013183425228,0.08294166331025428,0.0,0.07206163899403799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803700356078314,0.0,0.13776301902327448,0.0912016341746749,0.08495082433008065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18073137683984444,0.0,0.09258391981869303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06973026690415401,0.0848733295105617,0.08747694965839801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828545784637939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524475473127592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820289774321908,0.0,0.14550321422501128,0.07918350854143406,0.0,0.0,0.16372068397842873,0.17348962466452347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042292433284685016,0.0,0.1840203885592737,0.06789605510931868,0.06474219046973867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830768742371666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855269048302437,0.1623965942005592,0.08040047343707325,0.3188732468934784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22243685587667586,0.13196823432305546,0.0,0.08571314446462118,0.0,0.0,0.05717656696763925,0.2768326358903709,0.0,0.07147931794014238,0.0,0.0679766468330405,0.0,0.08836523255953266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062432743753932665,0.0,0.0,0.07596501245921504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727483724420246,0.056119740444981456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23257986701461486,0.0,0.0,0.15491423487155712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05185790636931987,0.08322890020602529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912987593033393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384911648153067,0.0,0.07369279316275655,0.0,0.09144915975893264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858769824082157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767686357001916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217269225590228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398785442710933,0.107557638542156,0.0,0.07953183450182988,0.06426434513000863,0.09440385126382572,0.18607759091731735,0.0,0.0,0.08993715127032285,0.054958955788167584,0.0,0.0,0.0842706080635536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679127921564952,0.047745729268464335,0.19276028872626996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05893172717519725,0.0822074869149458,0.0,0.05750374077631627,0.08850486033071434,0.0,0.10425681126906758
mentalhealth,bob1jones2017,2020/03/06,"Need Advice I'd rather not go into specific details, but I have a diagnosed issue that I've been seeing a psychiatrist about. The past few months have been pretty good, but things started to take a turn for the worse recently. 2 days ago something happened that was really disturbing to me, and I spent the night drinking all of the alcohol that I had on hand. Though I really don't truly trust anyone, the person who I do trust the most checked in on me and decided to come over to help. I told this person a lot, not only about this incident, but about my thoughts in general, including many that I have in times that I would consider myself in good mental health. I could tell this person was disturbed as I talked and at one point started crying and shortly there after left. I know they care about me, but it seems I've hurt them with the truth of my thoughts. I am getting more professional help as soon as I can, but of course, that is weeks away. This person is checking on me, so I've been lying and saying it was just the alcohol and that I'll be fine, when I know that, despite my intoxication, I knew what I was saying and I meant every thing I said. I'm not in crisis. I'm not a danger to myself or others, but I'm not terribly functional either. The person made a specific point about not lying to them and how it just causes more pain for the people who care, but that is only if there is a fallout for them to learn about later. It will be super rough, but I'm reasonably confident I can make it to my appointment alone at which point I'll have the help of professionals and would be able to be more honest with the person without leaning on them entirely and causing them pain. I don't know what to do. Should I wait it out? Should I be honest? Of course there is the third option which would be to expand my support network, but forcing myself to trust another person would be more painful for me than waiting alone.",7.382539986329463,6.0599080961038965,7.576008202323995,76.8372453861928,64.14285714285714,10.702665755297335,32.21120984278879,9.682069395223575,2.754116883116883,1527,46,302,25,19,498,180,385,0.145,0.68,0.175,0.924,0,2,4,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,6,1,17,21,1,2,20,0,39,10,1,6,2,69,71,28,0,10,22,0,2,0,0,7,8,3,0,7,28,15,3,2,11,1,3,2,9,8,0,2,16,6,41,13,50,40,9,36,0,1,1,0,24,20,0,6,14,227,69,3,0.08350113827149197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08159634591304463,0.07401872090729171,0.17847464498902246,0.0,0.17296399324713616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755822407602616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058385937377595995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845206809545424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170269951053854,0.17155734090391428,0.0,0.07192883692481727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666886436032597,0.0,0.0917220794798468,0.05385132630829682,0.0,0.0,0.08475189766041212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179932629071335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035331036829498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04362589836446761,0.0,0.04745562116417549,0.1400735861949112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383978080673638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.088757805293336,0.0,0.0,0.1679071585647844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938969553125156,0.0,0.0,0.08715349407863884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13767012555177266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072423105300922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098968172946038,0.0,0.07901079600554481,0.05573765819318588,0.08465704818540352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414950770034305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664981192097727,0.0,0.0,0.06191503598923007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783601617455602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056582532319206874,0.12701275672173504,0.2665532951665623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971128483087613,0.057889175503638736,0.5103698120473411,0.0,0.0,0.2368066968589287,0.0,0.0,0.0849506768231931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698593469112454,0.08585307723803434,0.082447300390718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942870406444999,0.1328069132875482,0.0,0.0,0.0665395962735627,0.07601630019893747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428325573791004,0.0,0.0,0.11820507089312415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475610217723213,0.0,0.0,0.06278246413528507,0.06711505197572379,0.07298367531093444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094889186859397,0.0,0.08203944439330525,0.13258115323981914,0.0486901852244732,0.0,0.0,0.07978891598107793,0.0,0.0,0.0908252604839214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697957641037416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804921175486503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509479360046766,0.2372672514534842,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChesterSheep,2020/03/06,"Stuck thoughts: an anxiety symptom Does anyone get these?
They are repetitive /unwanted thoughts or one thought that, in my case, obsess over.  
I literally can’t get that thought out of my head it repeats itself . unless I vocalize it out loud (to myself) or write it down over
And over again it  will go away. Like an OCD thought.
It’s something I’ve recently developed with my anxiety. 

Just curious as to what others do to get out of that loop.",2.9177380952380965,5.598507678571429,3.783333333333335,84.5616666666667,79.35714285714286,8.019047619047619,29.57142857142857,8.841846274778883,2.8143428571428566,351,17,66,9,9,112,59,84,0.109,0.835,0.055999999999999994,-0.3818,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,4,2,1,0,0,16,14,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,12,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,6,1,7,1,17,7,0,14,0,0,0,0,2,9,0,2,5,48,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29221854175584416,0.0,0.0,0.13354688227646225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17944439316836078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16713943142354565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993581832251307,0.0,0.10854583376784828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19601411890281498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330962730234198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12942193140906574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18858273779323348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14703589206521125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19851505887897014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7581363106876247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway_today_2431,2020/03/06,"Thoughts on how to move forward Hi MH,

I'm 26. I studied engineering for a while when I was younger. was super depressed, hated being in an office was very frustrated with a lot of things in my life and coped with it in risky ways. Got laid off my web development job and never finished my engineering degree -- I was super depressed and frustrated with sitting in an office all day to the point that I was suicidal. Started getting into hiking and had this ""moment of clarity"" that THIS IS THE ANSWER TO EVERYTHING. Like wow all of these years of therapy and all that and hiking is all I need to feel okay? Sweet. Let's do this.

Went back to school for a degree in recreation so that I could be outside as much as possible, with the thought of going into therapeutic recreation. Seemed reasonable. But as I was going back to school one of my best friends died from an overdose and I was so upset I needed a way to cope -- cool I'm gonna go hike the Appalachian Trail when I graduate. and I'm going to hike it in his honor. Just so I can get myself through this, because I'm not great at classroom learning. Did well in school, Dean's List, did an internship with a program that gets kids with learning disabilities get outside (hard but loved it). Graduated, though my last semester my mental health was not doing great.

Hiked the trail. Amazing! I felt like i was doing the thing I was meant to do! I loved it, until I got injured right at the end. Had some really intense anxiety as a result, trained for a program doing wilderness therapy while injured, thinking it was what I really wanted to do. Realized that not only was this the wrong place for me but I had a night where I feel like I kind of broke. Where everything I had ever done that was impulsive and shitty just came back into my brain (which was a lot through my early 20s) and I had such an anxiety attack that I'm still feeling it months later, and I'm feeling so paralyzed by fear of the future, fear that I've totally ruined my reputation in a number of places, that people all agree that I'm just not a good person. 

​

I screwed up a friendship because I was putting my mental health things on him and he couldn't take it. I ultimately had to move home and am getting intensive therapy and back on medication. and now I'm terrified that I've entered a field where health insurance and decent pay is not really a thing. but I feel like I can't go back to an office job. and I just don't really see a path forward.

​

Any thoughts on this? advice? I just feel like my career path is totally fucked now because of my employment history. and I'm so scared of the future and feel like I've thrown away my 20s. looking at the job market terrifies me and I don't know what to do.",3.4482711518858267,5.254036143119265,4.722324159021408,82.77708460754333,73.80733944954129,7.85361875637105,27.34046890927625,8.582038596145509,2.0609135575942914,2178,83,420,41,45,720,238,545,0.17,0.713,0.11699999999999999,-0.9909,4,0,0,0,0,0,63.0,0,0,0,4,28,38,6,4,32,2,45,12,1,3,9,83,95,40,2,5,14,0,9,6,1,1,7,0,1,2,33,30,0,0,20,0,1,13,10,15,1,1,33,13,48,23,64,56,12,72,0,4,2,4,9,30,2,4,36,295,81,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483963712292158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14378745763348338,0.16125294574708632,0.04512249172900008,0.0,0.10152012361854726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548641161293222,0.0623410714037719,0.2551078036069153,0.0,0.12134499314911265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06963365204911456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407218180911078,0.0,0.07589045202137208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05297767840152437,0.0,0.0,0.04279236303227391,0.0,0.11429993015219199,0.0,0.06886420740839018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790242170591526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058769293120377625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06002032190551072,0.0,0.0,0.11926806209677415,0.0,0.0,0.14933172821463814,0.2348514114462828,0.18961112703793093,0.0637095345859362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051264363601046914,0.06134251909515389,0.17333419698279173,0.0,0.1885504320871838,0.05565396585934829,0.10613752602447532,0.14630940542930945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059439487296617986,0.06551010648058682,0.0,0.21159123570973995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06655772927278586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975361143779792,0.0,0.0,0.06909670893020395,0.03646601606791208,0.05408676244671665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785070328749084,0.046867269399499985,0.1945011054045111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557200263842689,0.0,0.0,0.11282233662069037,0.11977281439033415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684392810898519,0.13373695800489185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05296253859054567,0.141046027655248,0.04877728034858992,0.09840020214318226,0.051175724182978624,0.0,0.0,0.06226803903559733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044962685792119934,0.05046464375129961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04600099539997895,0.05793710672658394,0.1386500669626643,0.0,0.06272527738343223,0.07480333019116309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670335257068169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003038812599844,0.06822220176296366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05666532096295152,0.0,0.0,0.06643118805963312,0.2014591227737457,0.05287495694085704,0.06040551528592665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04696517850791468,0.0,0.052989798653317405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257969619254873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049889393289166084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276422045367097,0.0,0.17632862862795984,0.0425164893838795,0.0651917404475047,0.15803122865151534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054748388064445534,0.03913687153632725,0.10533625761258264,0.0,0.0,0.059659548889227476,0.061510136210641775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254687282348342,0.16125294574708632,0.04272932356401988
mentalhealth,Ihsanher,2020/03/06,How to come to peace with things you can't control as a 17 year old? I've tried browsing the web for answers but they are all useless they say you can't control it so don't worry about it but that's why I'm mad I can't change it how do you come to accept shit like this?,-1.0057142857142836,0.7912166825396838,1.0311111111111124,103.70000000000002,88.5238095238095,3.6,16.936507936507937,3.1291,-1.2475015873015871,213,5,56,0,7,70,44,63,0.182,0.647,0.171,-0.4279,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,3,2,2,4,5,2,0,2,0,6,1,1,4,1,12,9,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,2,2,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,0,1,6,2,7,9,1,4,0,1,0,0,6,0,1,0,3,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703832678709517,0.4403410916307577,0.0,0.0,0.5733380662202354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486972044367728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682016243247398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032576351619456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26236231281548106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16980448401975767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17353071815939491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306327264978385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595668720019769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16459336857001264
mentalhealth,Username_Bond,2020/03/06,"Scared of losing imaginary friend. I talk to myself everyday since I was young and still do. It's not someone or stranger or illusion that talk with me but myself talking with myself, verbally, I only talk in my room so nobody knows it. We chat like very close friends. And one day I told someone I know about this, she said that is imaginary friend, it is okay. But I feel like I don't want to have imaginary friend anymore because  I'm sure it's a coping mechanism for loneliness and isolation I feel deep inside. But I don't know what to do or replace it. I'm weird, I don't have much friends, and my imaginary friend is someone I could trust with all my heart. So when I think I'll stop talking to myself, I'm scared of loneliness and of losing imaginary friend.

What should I do.",3.1784615384615407,4.931636312101912,4.0766878980891725,87.34507594316516,74.4140127388535,7.888094071533562,26.72660460558549,8.617729084823388,1.8781468887800097,619,23,127,12,13,199,81,157,0.152,0.606,0.242,0.9664,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,0,2,5,17,0,2,1,1,14,1,1,0,2,29,26,14,0,3,7,0,2,2,7,1,0,1,1,0,10,10,0,1,6,1,0,0,4,5,0,1,3,3,23,12,13,21,2,10,0,2,0,0,17,4,0,3,8,80,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255186960246802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918262597492994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061275990272502,0.0,0.0,0.07319184671939324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476819887862046,0.08107748417623542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6137762030149283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448653730406548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871138822011245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089124386348127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25393320438636985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342841978533187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690395606587773,0.08631447782886402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795525257303804,0.0,0.2272471529642229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388033872341388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2884798573172305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063349032162632,0.09488296223717946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696325301122776,0.0,0.0,0.4560959714017719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271999379152443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844483337254138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936413729787388,0.06693951209011402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BobSteveBros,2020/03/06,"Haven't been happy in a while, not sure why Lately I just can't seem to get myself in a good mood. I'm either totally deflated to the point where I'd really rather just not come in contact with anyone or I'm really angry. It's probably been this way for 2-3 months now. I've had issues at times before but never this intense and for this long. I saw a doctor (just a general practitioner, not a therapist or anything) in September 2019 who ended up diagnosing me with SAD (Social Anxiety Disorder) but I don't agree with the diagnosis to be totally honest. The only mental illness I've ever though I might suffer from is ADHD or something along those lines. I'm a huge PC gamer and would play every night but now I can't even bring myself to open up a game, there's just no motivation and I know it's not gonna bring me out of my slump and I'm not going to get into it. I work at an office Mon-Fri 8a-5pm, recently they have been making alot of changes (Commission structure, management changes, etc) and it has definitely been aggravating, though I can't say I'm sure that's what's causing all this. Every day now I usually go home, stare at my Steam library for an hour not deciding to play anything, and end up turning on the TV and just falling asleep early. I have a girlfriend who lives with me and there's nothing wrong with the relationship whatsoever, we are happy together. I just can't figure out what to do, I so badly wish I wanted to do things and felt okay again. It's really gotten to the point where I can't even formulate a response when someone tells me a joke or tries to be friendly with me, I just want them to go away.",4.461248303934871,5.073482985074627,5.988039348710991,79.25275101763907,69.8955223880597,9.314789687924018,27.764586160108557,9.457814108942452,2.308970149253731,1300,42,261,27,22,444,185,335,0.127,0.7490000000000001,0.124,-0.1989,0,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,1,0,2,2,23,16,0,0,19,1,23,4,1,3,7,66,47,21,0,5,22,0,1,0,2,3,3,1,1,0,16,22,0,0,6,5,0,7,15,4,0,0,8,4,27,11,39,34,6,49,0,2,2,0,13,21,0,7,20,177,43,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307596365495004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08323372613963369,0.0,0.0,0.07607733964731317,0.0,0.17907061361763418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222366718089604,0.0,0.09084566445365866,0.0,0.0,0.0925830377805806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117702881819722,0.23019754482795446,0.0937238452090916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016870544561381,0.0,0.0,0.110432395087993,0.0,0.0,0.12469725816899566,0.11136411821682768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927336994734588,0.0,0.12134371061423868,0.14372624265953976,0.09841822208701967,0.183341843210876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446760238657826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406065415611051,0.0,0.11368978340891787,0.0,0.1855051526945196,0.09125849709023053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316448790077033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913792484300784,0.0,0.10714868937130237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356169427563115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05979508863099056,0.0,0.1227341234372558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607472949274272,0.09628691760764016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726266108581135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964747619055497,0.11542241312747095,0.0,0.0,0.08684523374437438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391530781913414,0.0,0.0,0.10210391247778294,0.0,0.1043990729540064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274931487499611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057073365821367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11730765431118458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091052826216628,0.0,0.10742948656050108,0.11681332320738155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08652423086355249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990498422859234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109105954309944,0.09218812860714427,0.08376159226116439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20509041185487184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509830799547572,0.0,0.0,0.1263282575982261,0.07228364319640887,0.0,0.213796093919742,0.0,0.0634436976639897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386985442381365,0.11834603503415535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983074269505455,0.0,0.12834923880339152,0.08636247579487599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817746455767888,0.0,0.12511767295825868,0.0,0.0,0.07920962188864886,0.0,0.0,0.07729027779100801,0.11895861292614653,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anxietyunited,2020/03/06,"Trying to do my bit to help others after struggling for over a decade. **I'm NOT selling anything here, no products and no services. But I am offering a link to my podcast which people who are struggling with anxiety might find useful** (does that count as self promotion? If I'm not trying to exploit sufferers like most people do who try to offer help).

Hi all, I've been experiencing anxiety, agoraphobia and panic attacks on and off for around 15 years now and a few years back I decided to document my struggles on YouTube. My channel is called Anxiety United, it's reasonably popular. Over the years I've tried numerous things to try and build free resources for people, create social networks for sufferers and a bunch of other things (I'm not looking for praise here). I always felt like I wanted to share what I've learnt over the years through various self-help books, therapists and peers.

The reason for this post is to inform anyone who might be interested in my latest Youtube series where I am speaking to authors of anxiety books, cbd experts, doctors, celebrities, professionals in various mental health conditions. Of course it's early days yet and I've only just filmed the first episode with an author, but the potential is there to actually make this something useful for people.

**My podcast called ""**[**The Breakdown**](https://anxietyunited.com/the-breakdown-podcast-ep1-drew-linsalata-from-the-anxious-truth/)**"" is available on** [**Youtube**](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWod0TRCSWQ) **in video format and on Spotify for the audio only version.** I called it The Breakdown because I want to breakdown various elements of mental health, I want to learn more about treatments, medications, sufferers experiences and more. At the same time hopefully breaking down some of the stigma attached to mental health. I have a decent following on twitter with a bunch of celebrities who I hope to reach out to once the podcast gains some traction.

If you can spare some time, feel free to jump over and take a look at the pilot episode where I talk to an author and creator of The Anxious Truth. Any feedback, suggestions or even viewers would be great to help get this new podcast on the map. [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWod0TRCSWQ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KWod0TRCSWQ)

I built a website for sufferers to freely use a few years back where people can share their own experiences either in blog posts, videos or via the social network based on the website, you are of course welcome to come along and see - [www.anxietyunited.com](https://www.anxietyunited.com/)

Thanks in advance for any views of this post. I appreciate the time and hope you find my offerings useful.

**JUST WONDERING:** Why would we not be allowed to share something (even if it it self-promotion) if it is aimed a helping people who are struggling for **free**? If the purpose of any social media platform offering mental health information is to help, then surely resources should be shared and then allow people to make their own judgement.",5.88076633512916,9.410530163385827,4.958624119353504,75.3854917806327,74.13779527559055,7.108219367315929,29.975272827738642,8.20500826718156,2.7437553805774284,2465,107,360,45,57,735,248,508,0.073,0.7490000000000001,0.17800000000000002,0.9957,1,0,2,0,0,0,146.0,1,3,2,5,16,30,1,5,30,0,26,6,0,10,3,78,52,27,0,14,16,0,2,2,0,5,6,2,0,1,22,23,0,0,12,7,4,4,6,10,0,1,2,10,26,23,75,41,20,55,1,4,5,0,39,27,0,17,22,244,48,8,0.0,0.0,0.06122017622909157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05220043122069736,0.0,0.0,0.12798557339769526,0.0,0.19196799252960356,0.14174507580945744,0.0,0.04386567454816038,0.0,0.05162544651604373,0.055847328226358815,0.0,0.0713699628412909,0.0,0.09647847380695827,0.0,0.03824258992217165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849022170983345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19217792650308455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05404052915629748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04045879641444232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421179011633261,0.05489970097401546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287157008592846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273346688642547,0.0,0.0,0.031720631473368746,0.0,0.06023530618132107,0.0,0.11467705565258232,0.053362242030818234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03277637639266849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916540742699878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667369010744328,0.0,0.0,0.25229913580989954,0.0,0.0,0.18692962131903626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0612981699562459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536296871421903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375201578307062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319877396963047,0.25288794418414795,0.13310355049965972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06058972116954469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681058116370021,0.0,0.09542537981000557,0.0,0.0736058442127775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30444718241945223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802479703949381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12900377434127794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049991563136607235,0.0,0.19633843079193372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185087592467528,0.0,0.09659272426710602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623363981150653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05912686551002254,0.0,0.04716880918223875,0.050423906157575284,0.0,0.05775783273484465,0.0,0.07284001070134245,0.08335651015948747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974360854738734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21296426821028008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21673111507102186,0.0,0.0,0.1110079419960211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566084556612488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803328233763889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913009279858553,0.0,0.0,0.2019959731716233
mentalhealth,TheGirlWithColdHands,2020/03/06,"I Feel Like I've Been Left With A Brain Injury I feel like this depression that I've been in for the past 9 months has  left me with a brain injury. I feel like everything I've ever learned   has abandoned me. Expressing myself, even in the simplest of ways (like writing this post) is so  damn difficult. Has anyone else had an experience following a  depressive  episode where you needed to start over with everything? How  did you  move forward? How did you cope?",4.598768472906404,6.554535149425291,4.7192118226601,83.3648275862069,71.06896551724137,8.649589490968804,28.52052545155993,9.23628265651192,2.476045648604269,366,14,69,8,7,114,56,87,0.231,0.6920000000000001,0.077,-0.9421,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,3,0,0,6,9,1,0,6,0,9,2,2,2,1,13,15,3,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,5,3,9,4,9,10,0,15,0,3,0,0,5,7,1,0,9,42,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159873172837211,0.16996390367075054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3703544044997676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857448068356573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857165113229025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956233082433953,0.15004816946316596,0.0,0.0,0.2981649185623088,0.16226269984128072,0.0,0.0,0.25162209301732297,0.3555146192819381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3604587215723922,0.0,0.0,0.3241628157260252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13240402106047386,0.17630443812879573,0.0,0.12299809245970054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15835145413490612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886741168572946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741088417882012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13166800952643115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Frenzy999,2020/03/06,Does anyone ever have moments of such clarity? That you can see you've been in the middle of a storm but you just couldn't see it before and soon you won't see it again,1.7945045045045056,3.0948228648648666,3.2524324324324314,93.71126126126127,77.1081081081081,6.014414414414415,17.738738738738736,6.42735559955562,-0.3285423423423426,134,2,31,1,3,44,29,37,0.0,0.945,0.055,0.2144,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,1,5,8,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,3,5,0,6,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,4,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396618042104657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916586985907215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999466330240074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31004092390597243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8193924981228737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goopgab,2020/03/06,"Hearing familiar voices in my head while very tired. Hello everyone. I’ve been hearing usually friendly voices while very tired for about 4 years now. Sometimes they call out my name, either maliciously or urgently, but most of the time I just hear friendly chatter, like the voices are talking to each other, yet I have a hard time remembering what they said.

I have no mental illnesses I know of that could cause this. Anxiety and S.A.D.",6.199282700421939,8.225319075949367,6.124746835443041,74.60247890295359,67.10126582278481,9.317299578059073,32.154008438818565,9.725611199111238,3.3892514767932487,353,15,57,8,6,111,62,79,0.17300000000000001,0.7170000000000001,0.11,-0.5507,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,5,4,1,1,0,13,10,5,0,1,4,0,1,1,2,0,3,7,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,8,8,3,7,7,3,10,0,0,0,0,12,2,0,2,9,39,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701833265644275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695429845787436,0.0,0.0,0.17056638341034264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256753712899308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158656071065434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565605224739497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873710356654635,0.0,0.17040251046738614,0.0,0.5614094295298159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912499393119932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811175992428313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16732687879846722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18808826794226655,0.0,0.15793980857783874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16421546186282734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345475778046628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19363575484582746,0.3816716616409328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18286699207211565,0.2739968676044161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692279010676643
mentalhealth,throwaway_6327,2020/03/06,"How do I make a Dr. appointment for mental health issues I’ve been having trouble for about nine months now, and I’ve really been meaning to do this since last September. I just don’t know what to say to the receptionist when I call to make the appointment. I’m in Canada and 19. Thanks for any help ik this is a dumb question.",3.5476119402985056,4.8085222686567155,4.6061492537313455,85.90564179104479,72.58208955223881,8.345074626865673,23.84776119402985,8.841846274778883,1.4802561194029855,260,7,55,5,5,85,47,67,0.091,0.823,0.085,-0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,1,0,4,0,7,2,0,3,0,9,13,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,3,1,9,11,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,1,4,33,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18445937468483015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769766873711142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28832618008049626,0.0,0.0,0.1818132293723629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831146392738574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907196529687505,0.2211050409088168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621231061394948,0.0,0.0,0.295470886797088,0.0,0.0,0.2733563096868943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21650924795570314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038621989401232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376976464147315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157089726922047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243808919724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24973065541492465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pointlesscake,2020/03/06,"Help with anxiety nausea My anxiety is so bad, I get nauseous, feel sick and just cry. I know what triggers it and it's such a silly reason that it makes me feel so pathetic. It's still trying to get over someone I have feelings for and so now they are going away for four days with friends, I'm racked with jealous, anxiety and anger. So many people say to have a distraction but I can't, there's nothing I have any passion to do. I'd love to meet new people but I have no way of doing so. I've tried dating apps to no avail. 

 I literally hate feeling this and I just want it stop",0.05487804878048763,2.2938557886178863,2.2860487804878065,93.27785365853659,88.67479674796749,5.231219512195122,20.39512195121951,6.742157984588678,0.3631131707317072,454,15,100,6,15,153,80,123,0.26899999999999996,0.628,0.10300000000000001,-0.9606,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,11,9,3,1,2,0,9,3,0,3,0,22,22,12,0,1,4,0,4,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,8,8,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,0,5,11,4,13,22,0,10,0,0,0,2,6,2,0,0,6,64,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543821362141738,0.0,0.4233311082359269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17330498233785518,0.0,0.15401527559905748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20261917563352616,0.11896057530789582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3730713618415687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251230253805486,0.0,0.19274407237621846,0.0,0.10483210688190794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821147373781291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363875104844857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137365509247688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664811416861226,0.0,0.1231275873692767,0.1870121285100504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815132250204835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769930583919005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557608175734611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896542232167132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14668892943420844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629122335973913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14730892352203045,0.15421569861362006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504706428417283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879849636257173,0.14641469783899058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-Robfromstatefarm-,2020/03/06,Dont know what to do this my depression/suicidal thought. I NEED HELP!!! So I'm lost been lost for years now and I'm think of end my life in my early 20s but in the back of my mind thought all the negative thought about myself I dont want too.,-1.0878571428571426,0.9432863518518528,0.96671957671958,101.87166666666668,92.88888888888887,5.307936507936508,18.825396825396822,6.868970318607317,-0.036282539682539916,189,6,49,3,7,62,38,54,0.19699999999999998,0.763,0.04,-0.8234,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,11,15,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,0,7,0,7,9,1,7,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621135289159757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4941771141674074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186730812717944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14131339919559666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158654197694572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891387730176645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4602867956923653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21287593092311788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15632610792314675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306113437351653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508991167043402,0.0,0.5021210600656463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435167144595392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357661610741892
mentalhealth,Hen1234567,2020/03/06,Yeahh Because of my indecision my life has been at a total standstill for the last 4 years. I've told myself to just do it but i'm too hesitant. Urg,-0.20906249999999807,1.9989912187500032,2.64875,90.32125,89.9375,5.7,20.5,7.1686216300943375,0.6363499999999997,117,4,26,2,4,41,30,32,0.13,0.87,0.0,-0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,0,1,4,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,4,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602884717733998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4817711010412864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4174643657704526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5647577370317285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806061285414746
mentalhealth,spicymilk29,2020/03/06,"Does anybody else have trouble with patience in the long term? What I mean by this is that I’m just so frustrated that I have to go to school for 6 more years just to get to a point where I can maybe get a job that I enjoy. I’m generally pretty impatient when it comes to every day stuff do but this is different, it kinda makes me anxious in some weird way. Is this just me?",2.4870416666666664,3.5151042875000047,3.9175,90.72416666666668,74.875,7.333333333333335,23.333333333333336,7.793537801064563,0.8393333333333328,293,8,68,4,6,97,56,80,0.135,0.812,0.053,-0.6649,2,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,3,0,7,0,0,1,0,11,15,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,10,15,3,12,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,5,45,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753632714795104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20996534540594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719581759271226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546623870600744,0.0,0.0,0.21330351233891834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036182629311169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053662723251086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546941452234011,0.0,0.13852630342965686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418800053981184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21570728205249007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270215333639948,0.0,0.2448753261335025,0.2655105333796793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304184803858993,0.0,0.0,0.2479770140075212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466836702617958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790305209191534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19347399821176225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15696424494631905
mentalhealth,lindanimated,2020/03/06,"Hating what I used to love I don't know if this is the right place to post about this, but I thought I would give it a shot. I also posted in /r/depression, but I thought this could work too.

I've been an artist my whole life, ever since I can remember. I went through many years of art school, and while studying I was doing well. Art has been synonymous with my identity forever, and I've always wanted to be an artist more than anything else.

But I've also had mental health issues my entire life, and I've gone through a couple of periods of terrible depression in the past. I've been medicated since I was a child, so that's helped most of the time. But now, starting last autumn, I've gone into a depressive period that's a bit different than the previous ones.

I think a combination of my medication losing efficacy and experiencing an artistic burnout are the reasons for this depression. I did two solo shows recently and have been pushing myself to draw so much, so I think burnout is very likely. In any case, I started to notice that I didn't enjoy drawing anymore.

Drawing became a terrible, dreaded chore. It started to feel like way too much work - and that work was not interesting or exciting. The work was also difficult and just SO much. SO many lines. Honestly, when I think about drawing I start to feel physically unwell.

I've been advised to take a break from drawing, and I'm doing so. I haven't actually drawn anything for about a couple of weeks, and I'm going for one month.

I'm just so terrified that I'll never enjoy drawing again. I can't even remember what it feels like to not hate drawing. But I still want to be an artist so much. Plus, I honestly don't have any other hobbies unrelated to art that I could focus on. Nothing else really interests me.

I should also mention that I'm switching medications right now, and I'm about to go onto a full dose of my new medication (which is actually one that's worked for me in the past).

I've never experienced anything like this, and I'm so scared. Any thoughts or advice would be super appreciated.",5.484514967790831,6.156943086206898,6.601477832512318,75.54597574838955,67.64532019704434,9.891474043198182,31.62523683213339,9.943994293440598,3.070941568776052,1647,65,311,37,26,554,193,406,0.149,0.757,0.094,-0.9789,1,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,0,9,30,25,2,2,21,0,34,9,0,2,3,51,67,35,0,8,12,0,3,4,0,3,8,0,1,1,20,14,0,0,13,8,0,6,9,11,1,4,18,5,31,14,41,41,9,46,0,4,0,1,6,11,0,4,29,208,51,9,0.0,0.0,0.1450352457077113,0.0,0.0,0.07261665660246823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377085625591389,0.06183339247351484,0.0,0.0,0.1516037704245963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369736350099683,0.0,0.0,0.1834569037878728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811292677195934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866389297603,0.16444924472322067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560186683899147,0.0,0.0,0.07764004201203151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415599076796133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049082260416154,0.06721930131594309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272287658552033,0.10617676710634254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128667514890187,0.08446624680002589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467350872822884,0.0,0.07898999637365528,0.0,0.0,0.04980965073929815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756223983311973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04083983630944083,0.0605740566975512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497728114754472,0.14522001876911442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313592539481393,0.0,0.0,0.06706932455841423,0.0,0.0,0.1506810563210592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29944538796527664,0.07488884257702612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059314990772288474,0.0,0.21851097101983766,0.0,0.11462772323456645,0.07177082490176481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130420153084674,0.08460450677203629,0.0,0.0,0.151066850107501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187809351349626,0.0,0.0,0.07764004201203151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423403758085634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04760605878747738,0.07640493404819061,0.07337396342053815,0.0,0.16836162593433782,0.12692378724558434,0.0,0.0,0.07439910192395295,0.07520753552934344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294302125647548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103931725291674,0.0,0.059345520471483185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05587324515275787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284805312891996,0.0,0.1769858680994443,0.043331823512343035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259185635928543,0.0,0.0,0.06418155839915478,0.0,0.061315039257199576,0.08766208100334086,0.05898526878197144,0.05960846463338197,0.0,0.06681525633053992,0.06888780747355852,0.0,0.08296650022977227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704994729607721,0.0,0.0,0.10557797857866263,0.0,0.0,0.047854379724887264
mentalhealth,Jambajooce99,2020/03/06,"2020 emotionally blunted Might be due to weed but I stopped smoking a month ago. I’ve had mental health issues for a long time but this year is so weird. On Christmas I was sexually assaulted and now I don’t feel anything. No, I didn’t report it :( okay I’m sorry. My mom works with the guy and she doesn’t take me seriously. I used to be so depressed and lazy and manic, now I’m depressed  and lazy and just hollow. My emotions are so hollow. I haven’t seen a therapist for it but I know I should. I don’t know how to recover from this. I don’t make much effort to talk to my friends and I don’t care on a level that is very new to me. Thanks for letting me rant",-0.2615302344714081,1.857514216783219,2.1311476758535584,94.7655902920609,88.65034965034965,5.04302756067462,19.60057589469353,6.522977012572876,0.050468037844508366,515,16,120,6,17,175,86,143,0.263,0.645,0.092,-0.9807,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,7,9,1,0,5,1,17,1,0,3,0,21,28,14,0,1,4,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,5,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,4,2,18,4,13,19,1,13,0,2,1,0,5,3,0,1,10,77,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15729433749947158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14602216343949434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18091706272949806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30566633689420003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3992036136080119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972155295487375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13709361164333012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17569850529743988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18861579895454592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18520653888404529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19503832658098894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18144959408083106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15703329246427936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184459541019371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17882288294620094,0.1882411651335366,0.0,0.20782150732764426,0.14163495237515975,0.0,0.13044253472388492,0.0,0.0,0.17137754275157913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19863521479596524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14835201395609304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334166003099787,0.14262361612525656,0.0,0.163367568915795,0.0,0.20602738892070405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346964029819652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15325555730297385,0.0,0.14641075640412604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918211558823658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114268799590605
mentalhealth,Dynavolt71,2020/03/06,"Im thinking going to psychiatrist, but im asking for your opinion about my condition I'm not sure I'm good with explaining my own story, so please ask if you need more details.

I'm 18 and male, living in Indonesia. I work as software engineer in kinda bad management company and I make less than $250 a month. Since I was a kid, me and my big brother only have few friends from our neighborhood, I was kinda a boy avoided by older kids and I don't know why. And then when I was around 8-10 (I'm not sure because I couldn't remember much or specific about it) I was kicked from religion class and it makes me trauma and until now I have problem remembering religion things and I feel like I lost my interest into it (I think I'll do better if I have someone to support me). And then few years later my mother cheats and it makes me feel numb for years, and few year ago she did it again and it broke my heart

Sometimes I wish that I never been exist, and this kind of mindset has been in my mind for around 5 years, and since I was grade 10 I usually absent from 1-4 days a week (6 days a week), it's because I don't feel good to meet them, so I'm staying at home playing computer or learning something new. I always hate myself and I have to overthinking to sleep, I did scratch my left hand with scissors (I don't remember this until someone I told before tell me) or with my finger if my mind can't get better

And around 3 years ago I went to my teacher, and he was psychologist and I tell my story and he said I'm just fine, I don't have depression or any other. But I'm not believe him because I just feel ill somehow.

I think I can do something productive, and maybe it would help my career or maybe financial problems, but I just keep losing my interest and going watch porn (probably I find its the easiest way to satisfy myself). 

So what I'm asking is what actually happened in my mind and am I actually ill ? And thanks for reading, feel free to message me. Maybe we can be friend ?",4.3512184166198775,4.645177216545019,5.79154501216545,81.69530179674341,70.02189781021897,9.048137750327534,29.91961444881153,9.057496981413335,2.3308442073741342,1560,58,325,28,26,530,210,411,0.13,0.71,0.159,0.9423,0,1,2,0,0,0,41.0,2,2,1,5,15,29,2,1,6,0,30,8,4,3,3,84,68,43,0,9,17,2,8,1,2,1,3,1,1,4,16,31,0,2,15,2,1,3,10,12,0,0,14,10,62,18,35,51,7,40,0,4,1,1,28,11,0,12,25,206,78,9,0.0,0.0,0.15698252941677898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259847399725534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692692045680239,0.0,0.0,0.05469737886641264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21480797801044588,0.2255827372770884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715841717964521,0.14709411669199818,0.0,0.06844278494103387,0.09062074682079296,0.0,0.14227337438544138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10374560462763813,0.0,0.06927705390791693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20334737949597065,0.057461541104431364,0.0,0.0,0.07351454770011137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428508314977905,0.0,0.04202306158008467,0.0,0.09142415699237842,0.13492721431740962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112687124464454,0.0,0.0,0.07941119775184667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953138071538151,0.05391272255420891,0.0,0.08068112364862891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376345879886695,0.0,0.0,0.07149278226066348,0.0,0.08375886884696547,0.04420401933019488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739097855350175,0.0,0.0,0.03929563079148081,0.0,0.07102404723988265,0.0,0.0,0.0899842503123958,0.08780241099848082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16106948833560447,0.0,0.24241807915589295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436440083033105,0.0,0.06420106532264575,0.0,0.059127705077185226,0.059640247368011434,0.06203509307976436,0.07768294924747904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117312304473985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829157210838934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672066448052558,0.1539275450957924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045503210784304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27334563161106873,0.0,0.07651045473588007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13307045716237373,0.0,0.08049135366640152,0.0,0.13630169006397838,0.1238429151360579,0.07955055647414808,0.0,0.0,0.08573115927506443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127471676608108,0.15161480211222156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406044389646453,0.07405214452844522,0.0,0.0,0.0534362877330856,0.1546151667687215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685743229099823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858587866861148,0.0,0.0,0.06384418247122756,0.12903742820772005,0.0,0.0,0.07456244315239806,0.07257851172157828,0.0,0.09249428607970016,0.0,0.0,0.05855637540252037,0.0,0.0,0.05713748422707625,0.0,0.0,0.25898193008971504
mentalhealth,sneakybihh,2020/03/06,"I feel selfish but I also care to much about other people and what they think?? Help please. I know the title sounds crazy but I constantly feel that way. I'll go out of my way for others then I will get called selfish for trying to do something for myself. As of now, I'm an 18  yr old in my senior yr of high school. When I was around 7 yrs old I started to have the need to make everyone around me happy and If I did something wrong or if I needed help, I would keep to myself to make sure that no one gets mad/annoyed at me. 

I'm still going through the same problem, sadly. Its one of my biggest faults because I will go out of my way for people, buy things for people when I have no money, I won't ever talk shit about anyone even if I don't like them or feel uncomfortable by their actions, if I'm sad I will keep my problems to myself because I don't want to burden my friends with my worries. I'm a big people pleaser and it's ***not*** a good thing. 

I've noticed that when I'm with people who aren't family I will go out of my way for them and do the most for them and I get called nice and sweet. But when I'm at home, with my mom, I've noticed that I get meaner. I will give attitude and make her feel badly. When my mom calls me out on it, I get ""weird""? Like I don't even know what to call it. It's like whenever I do something wrong and I get called selfish I want to bang my head on the wall or cut myself or stop eating for a few days (I never do it, though). But I don't know if i'm just manipulating myself to make myself seem like the victim in my own head or if there's something wrong with me. When this happens, I don't tell her that I feel this way, I just try to do my best to do as i'm told and not make her upset.

I know that this is a loaded question but I don't know what to do. I'm still in high school and whenever I tell my mom about something I have to do or if something is wrong with me she tells me that I'm being selfish for asking for her help. Maybe I am being selfish but I don't know where the line is anymore; I have the constant feel that I need to help everyone around me and when she calls me selfish I just want to hurt myself as punishment for messing up. What do I do?",0.8864691502884519,2.269257084188915,2.864381050161338,95.17876967830252,79.80082135523614,5.4594504742348695,19.808790456634398,5.916634753146586,-0.2400544245624329,1708,40,412,10,42,575,178,487,0.205,0.6709999999999999,0.124,-0.9913,0,0,6,0,0,3,46.0,0,0,5,1,26,37,4,1,13,0,37,4,3,6,3,85,90,43,0,16,24,3,6,4,1,7,0,1,1,0,26,23,1,3,15,0,2,5,14,25,0,2,3,8,80,12,62,78,6,52,0,3,0,0,34,21,1,16,25,282,106,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04826916083789001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059860021092392,0.04220449521046343,0.0,0.0,0.16119722226490096,0.0564276227490509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05039733813117391,0.07358871007142406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334316520451573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3698004173970407,0.0,0.061540138400652915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045351631360094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038926634483181705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06176244124112866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797332497175022,0.05459827330910939,0.0,0.1153514381585878,0.0,0.0,0.05690119988807892,0.0,0.18311628664743432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04663330095619722,0.0,0.18921087178932755,0.05790196114630405,0.13721389951694404,0.05062636024358865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05337536426357686,0.06425339813360753,0.0,0.0,0.12389172703098185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182976444299735,0.12754543360386664,0.06054511169383822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461567881517202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729990588941643,0.0,0.0,0.1990307397788985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795365496947766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014508830305619,0.0,0.0606388417982355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120755908363018,0.0,0.0,0.04437089304419154,0.13426655238727914,0.04655266894657102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743850035604094,0.12667347114035946,0.0,0.0818017941141492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092270450742564,0.0,0.0,0.06625618054363634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551103887906065,0.0,0.0,0.06761602036244092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12217328949718605,0.0,0.05494866952147755,0.0,0.0,0.061957762083702926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27880436427947203,0.0,0.0,0.04272249082940696,0.0,0.09640573117962126,0.05046292114814993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056887749656915135,0.0,0.0,0.0485143686456656,0.15826957552372742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019982526256562,0.03867568239936031,0.05930252203666675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576757190792939,0.0,0.08195975126576553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680410604767396,0.23955127196520834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06129760912581994,0.0,0.04287738206893504,0.2639728588176118,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RetroPacman,2020/03/06,"Slayer Threshold (how I feel everyday) I don't want to see, I don't want to hear
I don't want to feel anything can't you understand
Everything I do doesn't stem from you
It doesn't have a fucking thing to do with you
I just want to die throw it all away
Never have to feel again the way you make me
Lose my fuckin' mind all the fuckin' time
Can't control the violence that's spewing from me
Take it

I can't control the rage that flows from me
I can't shut it down it overwhelms me
I can't stop the rage that flows from me

Can't stop the
Violence I love it
No one's immune to hate that flows from it
Infectious I feed on it
Every fucking endless day
You're either on my side or else
You're in my way

No one stands a chance when I'm lashing out
Random hate there is no other way
It's my discipline it's my way of life

Never wanted bliss never wanted you
Never needed anyone I've polluted
Everything you feel everything you are
Everything you'll ever be you repulse me
It's always about you always come at me
With shit I can't identify you know it makes me
Lose my fuckin' mind all the fuckin' time
Can't control the violence that's spewing from me

Take it
Can't stop the
Violence I love it
No one's immune to hate that flows from it

Infectious I feed on it
Every fucking endless day
You're either on my side or else you're in my way
No one stands a chance when I'm lashing out
Random hate there is no other way
It's my discipline it's my way of life",-0.6088377445339468,1.5892828227848101,1.6248331415420054,96.20494821634064,94.18987341772151,4.898043728423477,17.308400460299197,6.574015621080383,-0.09223797468354444,1156,32,262,16,44,386,103,316,0.174,0.7,0.126,-0.9169,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,11,0,5,9,19,14,1,12,0,23,16,1,6,8,46,54,5,1,7,5,0,4,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,27,5,2,8,6,0,0,6,24,17,0,4,0,6,44,2,31,52,5,45,0,3,1,9,14,14,8,4,16,165,71,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13239209020807288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05562663186885098,0.0,0.06546689952892687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474444202330195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06852949720572203,0.0,0.0,0.26768273609077764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261265087954086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256542023122225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291581192690655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196195653793229,0.13405685931879432,0.0,0.2859952372292574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16090137975006436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22064165367200966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31417595145676624,0.0,0.0,0.08966414779945406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043721289391313534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238394918600804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800315483444104,0.0,0.0,0.14360279635207526,0.0,0.1062070194571862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16065552947296774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058988946119774885,0.2454305556874791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21563382121775426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339495078538795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166195580971032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19953436171218936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963075963606767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052852736818433416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277819731116416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281945066628964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815412272824786,0.44202880508396586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,klmraiden12,2020/03/06,"Having a small dick has taken over my thoughts entirely and now I can barely function. I’m 4x4 so about half of what women desire and everyday living is getting harder.  I can’t stop hating myself internally   This was never a problem when I was young, but now that I am college age and people around me are sleeping with anyone and everyone I realise just how cursed I really am.  There’s no point for me to try anymore and I’m going to be celibate forever.  Not really looking for help I just needed to get this off my chest.  Life really sucks for me and I’ll never experience things normal people do because of something I’ll never be able to change",3.0377083333333315,5.3122831875,4.8871875,79.02239583333336,76.5,7.079166666666668,24.729166666666664,8.07648339933343,1.7937010416666666,520,18,90,9,12,177,90,128,0.102,0.8390000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.6554,0,0,1,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,10,3,2,0,2,0,13,4,3,1,3,22,24,10,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,8,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,3,0,1,4,1,13,0,14,18,0,16,0,0,1,1,2,5,2,0,10,68,18,1,0.18391990117782392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823991212166978,0.12860107125423742,0.0,0.0,0.163727705331684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121158646751969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945628685375291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17574334728962182,0.0,0.179908954813995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19218111470286448,0.0,0.10452591827514322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815828253583512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327763289436723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12990806535956598,0.0,0.0,0.1624046423088107,0.0,0.1544463955786076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363742762827506,0.4255510982717783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802024532617588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550138036029602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17386375477874014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759865065019688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35347139469821925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18405272593087893,0.0,0.0,0.14159052544007847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15376527277268046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218820994939394,0.0,0.0,0.14601185748287268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486954008035572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,isnotaac,2020/03/06,"I really hate myself I hate everything about myself and I feel like everyone who looks at me finds me disgusting, and everyone who has to interact with me hates it. I feel like I can't connect with anyone. I just really don't know what to do. And even though I know struggles with mental health don't have an age limit, I feel like I've been dealing with this for too long, and everyone else I know around my age who struggles with mental help seems to at least be able to somewhat take part in society. Whenever I sit in a room with other people I don't even know what to do",4.146355932203388,4.9154147796610195,5.262500000000003,83.60442796610172,70.6949152542373,9.289830508474578,25.76694915254237,9.516144504307137,2.0273016949152542,456,13,95,10,8,151,65,118,0.16,0.755,0.085,-0.8775,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,4,2,2,0,10,1,0,0,0,23,23,5,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,8,11,0,1,9,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,1,4,17,3,18,21,3,10,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,2,6,67,25,0,0.13429040075901005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389897061804132,0.0,0.0,0.11954692789382618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384475065108298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218239806629787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17739508635678528,0.0,0.0,0.3849606984417873,0.12069155310717045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20370378479647572,0.2878112674041828,0.0,0.0,0.12273899341799704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3977519055659404,0.0,0.14274441630458148,0.0,0.0,0.09001202490860627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952099690390714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19682251962209785,0.0,0.0,0.1188427787992568,0.11277011473588484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27066627705147217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14542341751798687,0.0,0.09310005514794774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17205973885691891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225293725627827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28077896889063514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096966872419336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193963691612115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ttaway1802,2020/03/06,Is it inappropriate to send a card to your Psychologist? I am about to open a new chapter in my life after 2 years of the darkest and most challenging period of my life. My Psychologist whom I was seeing during the last 18 months of that time is largely responsible for me getting my life back. I am no longer seeing her as her time is much better spent helping someone else now however she did ask in our last meeting that I update her on a potentially life altering job prospect should I get it (I got it :D). Anyway I assume she meant via text as this is how all our previous communication has taken place but I would like her to know that her help is very much appreciated and a text seems a little impersonal. Anyway is it crossing some kind of patient /therapist boundary in sending a thank you card to her?,5.757151898734179,6.4042010443038,6.927696202531648,73.53597468354431,67.03797468354429,9.864303797468356,31.622784810126586,9.888512548439397,3.008595443037973,647,25,122,14,10,219,102,158,0.038,0.816,0.145,0.9461,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,2,2,0,2,6,5,0,0,8,0,13,4,0,1,1,14,25,6,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,4,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,6,2,25,5,18,17,5,22,0,0,2,0,19,7,0,4,13,87,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584878605790184,0.0,0.0,0.1303582662950833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993569319098224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162073603185407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771450742694151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355887950679768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.227265051184604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16823257355583446,0.0,0.0,0.17653962472893206,0.09316936930369953,0.2763794945658367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4789768010638632,0.08282389684714586,0.16991380666628164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531739546251234,0.0,0.2492484201161087,0.0,0.0,0.16373333232381007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771229858064226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701872549480279,0.15433393522269145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436423959937809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608063940440842,0.0,0.19683763926326728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19770885646233366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13988017711775882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042939645989215,0.0,0.0,0.109171896371113
mentalhealth,btumo,2020/03/06,"appreciate anyone who reads this it’s gonna my 17th birthday in two hours, i have people that love me but i’ve never felt more alone

my mental health has always been up and down. something happened about 7 months ago really fucked me up and i haven’t gone a day without thinking about it. there were some okay days but lately little things have just been triggering me and i’ve been wanting to cry randomly really frequently, especially when i’m with people or at school, having to hold in the tears just makes it worse

sometimes i wish i never had what i had so i wouldn’t know what it was like to lose it

i kinda just wanna end it all on my birthday. i’m honestly too afraid of the pain i’m gonna have to go through to get there so might need some drugs to help take that step. i know there are a lot of good things in life but rn i have nothing to really look forward to and just don’t wanna go through the sufferings and more. basically i’m weak.

i just wanna get better but i know the one thing i truly want is impossible to get

i’m sorry i know i probably sound bratty and weak and just being a teenager. i’ve always been sensitive and emotional due to my family background and like to dwell on things that make me sad, i just don’t wanna feel the pain anymore.

but i want to get better, i’m not lonely but i feel so alone, please help me",1.9030796703296675,3.8582379178571458,3.4442857142857166,89.54994505494507,78.75,6.593406593406595,20.412087912087927,7.61054688173877,0.6192939560439563,1067,27,228,16,26,352,144,280,0.139,0.669,0.193,0.8771,0,4,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,17,19,1,2,8,1,22,9,0,3,3,57,57,20,0,10,16,0,3,2,0,4,7,1,0,0,17,10,0,1,8,1,0,5,8,11,0,2,10,5,26,8,33,42,6,27,0,4,1,2,4,11,1,7,15,148,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949584372049285,0.0,0.0,0.22189508667737406,0.0,0.0,0.17827051287067308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623763522409486,0.07490317719844798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894838971106135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176700329029122,0.1381714713512366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422914315482901,0.0,0.0,0.12049941491029292,0.0948795430459217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098641475907097,0.0,0.1083296269609536,0.0,0.10285527029907432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903386397914413,0.22387023604688047,0.0,0.12176140217238768,0.08985003169278148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472887538470587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386717275148467,0.0,0.0,0.14360512383348828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549497792334503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354888927550541,0.0,0.12083986951614753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566443066324388,0.10467017168816843,0.10736579654524446,0.0,0.0,0.08995668249773504,0.11984369177592555,0.0,0.09107249020349864,0.09668305755696216,0.0,0.14301141253485267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795519896644816,0.11364100668134708,0.0,0.0,0.08550488177099719,0.0,0.0,0.07943064923248364,0.16524035147332866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278779853606272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258959323086517,0.0,0.22797371647409176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485317651947114,0.0,0.0,0.11758933277140506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549715142957502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715239651695242,0.0,0.20587799349914726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841460733614264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246883259388167,0.10594778905856876,0.1199158842634975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08054347069342352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846721276001517,0.0686403540093039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464400339142857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18955248347165127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318663181042105,0.10326314202738764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109167903950909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mththmhtm2,2020/03/06,"Why is self destruction so much easier than self care Depression, or whatever it is I feel, can't be cured in a fortnight but certain things can help because I've done it before. Basic hygiene, reasonable sleep schedule, leaving the house just to even walk, cooking real meals etc.

But all of that shit requires so much work. Much more effort required to me it seems than a 'regular' person. And I'm so fucking tired already

I wish I could just constantly be sunk into my vices. Drinking, smoking, jerking, hours in bed on my phone etc.

Just can't seem to get out of this cycle. Or maybe I don't even want to anymore and this is just my normalcy now. Idk",2.5542216838279828,5.01406706299213,3.5507086614173247,87.00584494245912,79.15748031496062,6.427377347062388,27.092065414900066,7.61054688173877,1.7265256208358577,515,22,97,8,13,165,91,127,0.126,0.769,0.105,-0.4507,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,4,10,7,4,0,3,0,11,7,2,1,2,24,20,9,0,3,8,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,7,4,3,2,4,2,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,1,8,2,13,16,7,10,0,1,0,1,5,5,2,4,4,65,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16569761628269838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891147091658524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091531901088677,0.0,0.12776917994430773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15309103408946462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16226209618699955,0.0,0.11988498643855736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932659555566056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15365869458569215,0.0,0.14709281787138198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33492066728950315,0.198349336998508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592188992428699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388140683344453,0.07844876741153041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064441935334552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14787050091750414,0.17325645120782698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899039170798684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084891321565233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3311392893878955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13110784511096865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17090703514439542,0.0,0.15438233572964735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733873812280538,0.3132847411525037,0.0,0.15412994045464268,0.0,0.0,0.1502614813149948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975500951351678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17257883404472518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856415484686754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548976611974056,0.0,0.17266858869227897,0.0,0.0,0.1093132033148101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ripgouramigus,2020/03/06,"i don’t feel well wish i could tell somebody
how alone i feel sometimes
how scared i am
about everything. im terrified.

i don’t feel like i belong anywhere.
im not one of them
im not one of you.
it feels like i have to wear a mask to get through the day sometimes.
i don’t feel like anybody knows me
and i don’t understand anybody.",-1.004657534246579,1.088079013698632,1.1583698630137,99.75974657534249,94.47945205479452,4.5638356164383564,20.9986301369863,6.2581,0.09542301369863047,260,10,63,3,10,86,42,73,0.129,0.6940000000000001,0.17800000000000002,0.34,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,1,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,7,1,1,2,0,14,16,3,0,2,2,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,6,1,1,2,0,5,12,4,6,15,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,36,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16829404171825968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297376688561331,0.0,0.0,0.1047947285000854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603849028781496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41080744580878575,0.34825571382122106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489603670118588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5265619074683762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930206192246197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23815803906949065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202193156132176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626841292077494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214200350042858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202629653653293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16916124420737458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461009812327708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18685926275760867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,001010010100,2020/03/06,"I feel like I don't deserve to feel down :/ Been going through a rough patch over these past few years. Never been to a therapist or doctor about my mental health. My family has simply been through too much these past few years to bring that into the equation. I don't want them to worry about me too. I have always been the rock, and I can't show them how weak I truly am. They need me, and well I need home to stay normal for my own sanity. Some days I feel worthless/depressed. While others I tell myself that I am fine, or that other people have it worse therefore I have no right to not be okay. I have never had many friends, and I distance myself from the ones I could have because I feel like they don't want me. Recently I started cutting. To cope with my emotions, I guess. It helps, but I know it isn't healthy. Never thought I would do something like that, but here I am doing it. 
Anxiety has controlled me most of my life. I don't fit in anywhere, and I fear it will always be that way. I just wish I had someone that actually fucking cared. Now that I am an adult I feel this need to already be something, and the people around me expect me to go to college. I did, but everything was just so overwhelming I dropped out. I fear that I will never amount to anything. I fear that I will always let myself and others down. Working toward moving out of the house for a job. Hoping that helps.
I just feel like no matter what it is I am doing I always manage to make a fool out of myself somehow. I just want to be normal. Maybe I don't have a place in this world. I don't want this to be the end of my story, but sometimes I just feel like there is nothing left. Just tired of feeling depressed, anxious and insecure ig. I don't even know what I am hoping to gain from typing this. Maybe just to vent, but any advice is appreciated. :):",2.516162402669636,4.069172790450931,3.6759801488833768,90.36821339950373,75.73740053050399,5.925524086591941,22.77136989817746,6.3737218528115,0.4196144262856163,1430,40,303,10,31,464,173,377,0.14400000000000002,0.7190000000000001,0.13699999999999998,0.2956,1,0,2,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,4,3,20,22,2,5,12,1,48,6,0,4,4,67,77,17,0,15,15,0,9,5,1,4,5,0,1,1,27,13,0,1,11,2,0,4,16,10,1,1,9,9,61,12,41,57,7,37,0,2,0,1,9,16,1,8,19,235,88,6,0.0,0.0,0.07994628355783716,0.0,0.0,0.0800554622627753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040548467653436,0.0,0.2726702687424245,0.0,0.0,0.0557113224888232,0.0,0.06267185309696789,0.0925511222083439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741670540978173,0.072929981802477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04994028319133094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835272676033967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918850507771614,0.06540987461114868,0.0,0.0,0.052834385815125694,0.0,0.14112253169445807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385297620161436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215379290104588,0.07256059929344001,0.0,0.0,0.05411021699921626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362826403733289,0.0,0.07723092397132975,0.2765627877449011,0.3313870367068327,0.2341068997102897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063294498670752,0.07573768053661174,0.0,0.0,0.0931189171954785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024883515742314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708168304202786,0.0,0.0,0.10982424147978097,0.0,0.08217673664632373,0.1627385984146548,0.0,0.09452962448208399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129721084106849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004688806830119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890109743777432,0.08377313102843191,0.05786554464606381,0.20012033526986986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054685095786706224,0.08305836554870842,0.16460790949366852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256040957171053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707254887055332,0.06022377513965031,0.18223745579549694,0.252740233467614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16053680848354934,0.078608560100466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055514015120723306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641199819158494,0.11359196672589833,0.0,0.08559344018550165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089034712572392,0.0,0.0,0.06996289099147282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941418006036124,0.1261386327112934,0.08102521176966357,0.0,0.057986429945267676,0.08732038647370435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716054352590695,0.0,0.0,0.09512040814933516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503873054104962,0.0,0.09415991301954346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19328426137979948,0.0650276834540227,0.0,0.0,0.07365977011347817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420888362392578,0.0,0.0,0.05964185453554921,0.08319808719907677,0.0834878444814258,0.05819666089940127,0.0,0.0,0.1055131059295841
mentalhealth,gr33nthundah,2020/03/06,"Hospitalization and work I'm at risk currently and really think I should hospitalize myself, but I have to work to pay rent and bills. My father lives with me and we work off of each other for bills. I only get so much money a month from work, I'm an at will employee. I don't want to seem unreliable or useless at work and get fired for being hospitalized. I don't want people at work to know.",2.4397883597883587,4.217994777777779,4.656190476190479,82.29,76.53086419753086,8.085361552028218,20.213403880070548,8.841846274778883,1.188384832451498,311,7,66,7,7,108,53,81,0.182,0.818,0.0,-0.9084,3,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,0,6,1,2,0,1,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,16,15,8,0,3,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,8,0,0,3,0,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,9,0,14,12,2,7,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,2,2,42,10,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20286207844146695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669521566986276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143070138939767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15496207391610595,0.0,0.142716507251299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765353140634407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459342847018438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243721613141698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17673933640237532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243981792771197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22901964072168174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8480249348931521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ayush4922,2020/03/06,SoS tell me what to do,-5.085000000000001,-4.072439499999998,-1.4499999999999975,116.145,110.66666666666669,2.4000000000000004,6.0,3.1291,-3.1418,17,0,6,0,1,6,6,6,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sam_the_sprite_god,2020/03/06,Happy for the first time in months! I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder in 2018 and have had 2 major depressive episodes and just got out of one that started in the middle of September of 2019 and ended March 3 of 2020 and I've been sh free since January this year and when I told my mom that I just got out of a depressive episode she said that she was proud of me and I'm happy for the first time this year!,3.902068965517241,4.731915011494259,4.7132758620689685,87.09681034482759,71.29885057471266,9.018390804597699,25.99425287356322,9.2995712137729,1.853308045977012,334,10,73,7,6,108,53,87,0.11,0.74,0.15,0.7081,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,3,3,7,0,0,4,0,5,1,0,0,0,11,11,7,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,9,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,3,8,1,7,5,14,3,2,17,0,3,0,0,5,6,0,0,11,47,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4858853426301576,0.1908604179631671,0.0,0.0,0.21551439497469654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16655092198163934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31989978509786765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30079148272241496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4003520741464436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22023453268208476,0.15009470361801858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742329158374288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17887263972255366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15555170874287308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309831318718446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21929961119886004,0.0,0.0,0.17968383332247032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421879814229616
mentalhealth,allieverfeelispain,2020/03/06,"I feel trapped. I won’t say much. 
My bf and I have been together for 4 years. Basically, a lot of it has been unreasonable arguments he’s started (getting really upset that I didn’t say okay instead of k) and I feel very unrespected and small. 

Yet, I feel crazy. He goes from being loving and normal to crazy and leads to me crying. It’s very confusing for me. And I’m just tired. 

If I leave, he will hurt him self. So I’m stuck. I feel terrible everyday. I don’t see any reason to live(unrelated to my bf. But my sure does add to it). I’m just existing in a space I don’t belong in. 
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mentalhealth,AnonymousAcc0nt,2020/03/06,"Today, I dropped out of college and I couldn't be happier. Hi, and welcome to my TED talk.
As the title states, I dropped out of college today and honestly, I've never felt so free. 
Ever since I was little I've been on the fast track, when I graduated highschool last year I also recieved my associate. My GPA is stellar and I have approximately 14 credits remaining until I complete my bachelor's program. I know what you're thinking, ""you're so close!!, why stop now?!""
Well...because that exact phrase is what almost killed me this school year. I'm diagnosed with the holy trinity of PTSD, Anxiety and Depression, for years I thought I was getting better bc of all I was achieving. When in reality it was years of surpressing of my mental health and my fear of failing. Well...look where thats gotten me..dropping of college, my mental stability is nonexistent. I've started self harming again, and my suicide ideation become more severe. I simply...can't do it anymore. When consulting my professor and the school therapist all I was told was I need to ""get up and keep going"", but I can't. How many times do I have to shout it out that I can't continue living my life as if everything is okay. That's all I've been doing my entire life is telling myself to keep going ...and I've gotten no where. I don't want to fucking walk anymore, I want to sit and just heal. As simple as it sounds it's taken me almost 5 years to get me to say that...grades aren't worth dying for. Life isn't a race, and we travel it as our own pace. I've told myself that for years, now its time to put my words into action. 
Whats the plan now? Well...I guess focus on myself until my wings are healed and Im ready to fly again.",2.4027956989247308,4.383395269005849,4.031878890775328,85.80567911714775,77.30409356725147,6.752084512356159,24.774948122995657,7.717688229018142,1.3498274665157513,1330,47,265,20,31,444,181,342,0.094,0.856,0.05,-0.8735,0,0,0,0,0,1,63.0,2,0,0,4,16,12,2,1,6,1,26,8,0,1,6,45,49,29,3,5,3,0,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,16,20,0,3,4,1,3,6,8,6,0,0,15,4,41,7,37,32,5,49,0,2,0,1,11,12,1,4,27,164,57,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20509442368253045,0.0,0.0,0.08189595417498101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834213966363883,0.0,0.20312321404385225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06242720531278195,0.11310202327192626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057190069572717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737325073105257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820419806789168,0.1039423623166868,0.10628374281507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09263425365882884,0.0,0.0,0.09203805950143636,0.0,0.0,0.11523791235678114,0.0,0.0,0.09832811621054773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467490832318094,0.16051247438823646,0.0,0.11640209848219632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281438953854114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885533198560134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061863685217767,0.0,0.0,0.18205056858584376,0.11329971280929513,0.0,0.05628097409540461,0.08347650783948812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170022277796881,0.0,0.10264011254884456,0.09042848644598596,0.0,0.0859972571637123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382603597156596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20640714508143676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593452514101452,0.07898366527596122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970993014416599,0.10294871946295736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143926378148318,0.0,0.2072855202863644,0.0,0.0,0.10683428741604313,0.1156923336996936,0.0,0.08471328021639189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248518703187591,0.0,0.0,0.08561800135212831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201815941883493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231198642083627,0.08950944854083268,0.0,0.0,0.11890403637128255,0.0,0.0656191625974533,0.0,0.08130082421065662,0.1194303139770941,0.0,0.19414236285146225,0.1957112145616246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080624595838002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762323297937153,0.0,0.09240764527706488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3956858815850006
mentalhealth,Cisco339,2020/03/06,"How to sleep with anxiety? So I can’t sleep. It takes me a very long time to fall asleep because I have so many racing thoughts about everything I did and everything I need to do. I feel like I’ve tried everything to relax my mind, but nothing seems to be effective for too long. I usually can’t fall asleep until like 3am and then end up sleeping way too late. I go to therapy and take meds, so just frustrated. 
Anyone else struggle with this? What have you found helpful to get your mind to stop?",3.162896039603962,4.6764569108910905,4.054542079207923,88.48003094059406,73.95049504950495,8.218316831683168,26.48638613861386,8.841846274778883,1.8467910891089103,392,14,84,8,8,126,70,101,0.113,0.7440000000000001,0.14300000000000002,0.4977,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,1,8,5,1,1,1,0,7,5,5,2,0,17,16,10,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,5,1,0,3,2,2,0,0,3,1,11,3,14,12,0,14,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,11,48,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207767514225432,0.0,0.0,0.10244130299266252,0.15011403109842214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930948359497241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238804062613505,0.0,0.1297619724624181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3950139137562967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407848741307528,0.10466483659615763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063768046546406,0.0,0.0,0.07654401168176532,0.0,0.08326346864904055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820074763283884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652666034966801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14315212215622602,0.0,0.0,0.2593086810501308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14853539590430795,0.0,0.0,0.1627365704697872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958611948857306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863329846971237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405776952008884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333747335543965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4398392846923361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248665383754748,0.0,0.15316122869491006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203104966702693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675438533060175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631042251081995,0.08542957844611199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946883229796304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16135708053368306,0.12088385698001593,0.0,0.11629066672301587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SailorJupiter9722,2020/03/06,"Suicide I’m a 22 yr old female, but I think my life is at the end. I don’t have drive, I don’t have confidence or self esteem. I don’t feel good enough for anyone and I really don’t want to be here anymore",-1.0281249999999993,0.5941941041666681,2.1665000000000028,96.62850000000002,87.125,5.506666666666668,15.85,6.742157984588678,-0.4461300000000006,159,3,41,2,5,57,36,48,0.06,0.7190000000000001,0.221,0.8135,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,8,1,0,0,0,6,12,3,1,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,3,11,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32454999532485423,0.2288249899227756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898516630855339,0.3381429078253341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16547045615971465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744867890208507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311505764055638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34340010006788896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096485603138508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413993584595935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579649257404215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096924176241774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19302405559878985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway12232244532,2020/03/06,"Is it normal to talk to yourself as if you were another person? Usually it is harsh critisism of me or other people. It is generally mean spirited and rude, is it normal?",3.1954545454545453,5.385201878787882,6.2212121212121225,70.0518181818182,75.66666666666666,9.248484848484848,29.181818181818183,9.725611199111238,3.4878363636363634,134,6,22,4,3,49,25,33,0.162,0.778,0.06,-0.6072,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,6,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,4,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3451823072140485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3585822230395848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6450686688408056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282175018272926,0.2874342532215785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645888348495448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3625540607881126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrGhost23,2020/03/06,"My sister is always stressed. Can I do anything to keep her normal until we see the psychiatrist? We lost our father 2 weeks back. She was also getting treatment from a doctor before dad passed away, because she had these visions and hearing voices. It had mostly been controlled before our father died. She was almost getting well. Now after he died she tells she can hear voices again. She also tells she feels like someone stands behind her. She passes urine without her noticing for a few times a day. Last night she found our old camera and saw father's pictures in it and that caused her to become stressed more and more. Our psychiatrist is only available after 21st of March. Can I do anything to keep her happy and normal till we see the doctor? She's only 11 years old.",4.251275026343522,6.614488342465755,4.388630136986304,83.60152265542678,73.10958904109589,5.040252897787145,23.559536354056906,5.369823440869387,0.5599763962065332,622,18,103,2,13,193,91,146,0.095,0.84,0.065,-0.6945,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,7,0,0,2,6,6,0,2,5,0,12,3,1,2,0,19,24,9,2,2,1,5,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,4,8,0,3,2,0,0,2,1,3,1,0,8,8,25,3,14,16,4,21,0,1,3,0,32,2,0,2,17,75,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12315186719749666,0.0,0.0,0.1967023674555147,0.10233350079108257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20241260649949766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554860120267504,0.09456799249325157,0.0,0.07497060875814958,0.13582744084074147,0.20930261661831195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633963162945847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13793830856235653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931525043114904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552783473172369,0.0,0.0,0.2517610341908884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218498947354585,0.08786061904435777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484687414171664,0.0,0.0,0.1285093345427407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091998400789712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772264151233311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186297125310118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10024931563690373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008433433421743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13425282433503566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541323638145733,0.24099867864168226,0.0,0.14001941369129575,0.25810446291783634,0.0,0.0,0.18707150404544307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19600649060381872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042049224197521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28175815822031264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21498889188103698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07171363268768981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865127269748633,0.0,0.11057842393956273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855330033201185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919840735782205
mentalhealth,froggiechair,2020/03/06,"advice for an extremely unwell loved one hi everyone, i actually got reddit for this reason alone and that reason is to get advice for my sister.

my sister is 16, in high school, and she’s been balancing depression and anxiety for years now. i have my own share of mental health issues (depression, anxiety, ADD) but in terms of recovery i am much farther ahead than she is. 

she keeps to herself a lot emotionally, but she will tell me a lot if i get the conversation going. i understand that she has major trust issues, the root of which i’m unsure. these trust issues bring her debilitating anxiety around other people, even according to her, around me and our mom. when a conversation is finished, she walks away feeling regret and rethinks her words to the point where i’m sure it drives her crazy. she overanalyzes her appearance (she also struggles majorly with body image issues), and the way she comes off in conversation, frequently asking me things like “am i annoying you?” “am i talking too much?”. she fears being looked at or having her classmates know she even exists, so she avoids school and classes. she can hardly get out of bed most mornings, even when she understands potential consequences she ignores anyone who tries to get her up. she will sit there in silence while i urge her to get ready for school. if i talk about school she becomes closed off and angry. she says she doesn’t like thinking about her problems, but i know that won’t solve anything for her. she also knows just how bad it is but for some reason it won’t stick. not only this, she hates therapy, and insists it doesn’t help her at all. she avoids trying new ways to help herself because she “doesn’t understand how it will help”, specifically medication. 

she is hopefully going to a doctor soon, but i’m wondering if anyone can give me advice on how i can help her through this? everything i do seems to either make it worse or do nothing at all and i feel like a failure of an older sibling. her situation is so upsetting to me and all i want to do is help her out. any strategies, coping suggestions or ways i can guide her away from her fears? what works for you guys personally? maybe someone has been in a similar situation? 

if you read all of this, thank you so much. it means the world to me.",5.274956418088356,6.700268016166284,5.799682634284438,78.35982045742381,68.60739030023095,9.097489383893317,28.51739551516055,9.454032385205345,2.5383972137376145,1813,63,332,38,31,585,217,433,0.145,0.7340000000000001,0.121,-0.9149,0,3,0,0,0,0,51.0,1,4,0,2,23,24,2,6,13,0,33,5,1,8,5,74,69,34,0,8,15,3,3,3,0,5,3,1,1,2,20,19,0,4,16,1,0,7,6,14,0,1,3,5,71,10,51,60,16,47,0,3,1,1,71,24,0,15,15,246,91,8,0.0,0.0,0.07166939396324089,0.0,0.0,0.21530180798220816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606439570553013,0.0,0.11746405872142306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049943493830780034,0.0,0.1685501888313593,0.0,0.0,0.10270556226074637,0.0,0.06043701101154871,0.13075898878407147,0.06865892711876033,0.0,0.1380035009483948,0.0,0.06132151235781045,0.04476993390300561,0.08111159358824567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157818420018642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326430619198757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651202621298796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517162423236408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826130520983363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455244554331676,0.0,0.0,0.0701775619787906,0.06600548302290453,0.0,0.0,0.16528671092944486,0.0742695814961517,0.0524674158640264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185366467937096,0.07045284448819437,0.0834782564606022,0.0,0.05873876500497845,0.0,0.0,0.07271973136991616,0.0,0.0,0.06579015372051028,0.07250937334128102,0.0,0.0780660609996467,0.0,0.0,0.24613516973663385,0.07759615063958954,0.0,0.07294508389728754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066200189420951,0.0,0.06527916700544678,0.0,0.0,0.12108641469485078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764104979165966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06167329611775638,0.0,0.0,0.12487656281996078,0.0662848236808949,0.0,0.04902351303196768,0.0,0.07378297395420785,0.08000053365213465,0.0,0.07398570387438544,0.07401287784792085,0.0,0.0,0.08601509819433599,0.0,0.0,0.1619663081642065,0.0,0.0,0.07093133120645136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047016586640457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049766613820016674,0.05585641500036453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091585907460038,0.06412725497853422,0.0,0.0,0.06942700600064658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027465993987059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346248546108447,0.0,0.0,0.2265337074025751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058404511916536436,0.0,0.2973113723663857,0.0,0.06685939460406261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16510514343485996,0.0,0.0,0.0622276858408596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677816295827578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921879156623012,0.0,0.0,0.1180607772852331,0.0641920789948779,0.06761608874248053,0.08398802609119027,0.0,0.04879200725971062,0.0470590595484667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972542373181173,0.0,0.0,0.2293690439552885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04331835471032632,0.17488597805593945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964537861215155,0.05346709539429932,0.0,0.0748442948314453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047294633475249384
mentalhealth,SubParSinner,2020/03/06,"Anyone have experience with ECT? I might be receiving ECT soon and I am wondering if its the right way to go.I have treatment resistant schizoaffective type [bipolar.Im](https://bipolar.Im) on Vraylar 4.5mg , Klonopin 1.5 mg ,trazodone 100 mg,and celexa 20mg...I have been experiencing bad hallucinations and severe self mutilation due the hallucinations of bugs crawling under my skin and I try to dig them out with a knife or pen. I buried a radio in my yard because I could hear people spying on me even with the batteries out it...Anyways things seem to be getting worse and I am scared ECT will not help and I am worried about any complications like memory loss etc.Any input would be helpful",4.6672572178477685,7.376747582677165,5.168996062992129,76.85354658792652,73.1732283464567,8.32782152230971,28.69356955380577,9.075114841892004,2.7265805774278205,561,23,97,13,12,179,92,127,0.151,0.807,0.042,-0.9109999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,1,3,4,0,1,5,0,14,1,1,0,0,18,18,7,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,3,0,1,1,1,2,10,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,3,11,1,14,10,0,11,0,1,0,0,6,7,0,5,3,56,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614314937712415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440423617247169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16049512505404595,0.11717512931673588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534715068953249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21437538188174785,0.12695906528900947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18802740456616504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042667481885988,0.0,0.10924268413148164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166451732230352,0.0,0.2576811518709933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41525975776272817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390866317004004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20391435012710896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13326069196940385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16415427137028304,0.0,0.0,0.1924450984636815,0.0,0.0,0.1749892735098222,0.20052669954893945,0.21715314812340186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770199242791122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050431844793087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15257476992472396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20845368140542908,0.0,0.19520807659635295,0.19588793551704906,0.13654710848482549,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stellabellaaa,2020/03/06,"I struggle between wanting to be self-destructive and wanting the best for myself. It’s so hard to put into words, but essentially, I go back and forth between being entirely self-destructive (starving myself, prescription drug abuse, going on benders, erratically spending money) and wanting to actually get my life together.

Does anyone else experience this, or at least can sympathize with this? 

I feel a bit like a loser for admitting this.",10.490200000000002,10.766094520000005,10.445166666666667,53.57175000000001,57.13333333333333,13.366666666666667,45.41666666666667,12.602617957971056,6.507466666666668,359,20,47,11,4,119,59,75,0.168,0.759,0.073,-0.8240000000000001,0,0,1,0,1,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,2,4,0,1,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,13,11,6,0,3,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,2,6,2,11,9,3,7,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,36,10,0,0.0,0.244448820667875,0.20133308779382791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14425982166224982,0.2113934782419831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586430343201177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21651422840997253,0.0,0.22524188380189594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18054711692914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392591971004011,0.0,0.17234920289507674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20181506642040128,0.0,0.0,0.10431875689813212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779075579813296,0.0,0.2345064497891297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848171731684329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457259582558989,0.10079479179559503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20740295086078492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4304618178600907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156846007579712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650687258406919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bubbaloubear,2020/03/06,"Things that are wrong with me Im mentally and emotionally fragile 

I’ve never spoken a word to my step dad I’ve lived with for 8 years ( I don’t dislike him ). Idk I just get to scared and I start to freak out. I just can’t talk to him like if someone told me to talk to him or I would die I would probably end up dying because I’m literally unable to talk to him 

Mood swings 

I cry too much 

For some reason when I’m hungry ( at school ) get really sad and I feel like I’m being starved or abused or something even though I’m not. And it makes me want to cry 

I have no motivation in school so my mom is constantly reminding me that I’m failing and that makes me feel like a failure

A lot of nights I just lay in bed and talk to myself in my mind about how I was an accident and how I wish I was never born 

I have depression and anxiety but the doctor and my mom only know about my anxiety because I lie to my parents and say that I feel good and I’m happy even though I’m not. I’m too scared to tell anyone that I have depression because my sister had it and my mom told everyone in my family and they constantly talk about it.

I literally cry when people say anything mean to me or about me. It doesn’t even have to be mean, like if my mom or my teacher is disappointed or just raising their voice I would have to try so hard not to cry 

I constantly remind myself that nobody cares about me and that nobody would care if I died 






And I also remind my self a lot about how I’m probably going to kill myself before I’m 20",1.3132821698906625,2.9156337134146355,3.5710344827586202,89.60500000000002,79.24390243902441,6.9631623212783875,21.066442388561818,7.873277556716777,0.7595957527333899,1190,32,271,20,29,410,144,328,0.182,0.7140000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.9724,1,0,1,0,1,1,11.0,0,0,2,2,25,19,1,2,6,0,20,1,0,7,2,61,48,35,4,9,17,7,5,4,0,4,1,3,1,1,12,18,0,0,8,0,0,2,9,10,0,0,5,8,51,8,35,37,4,21,0,5,0,0,24,7,0,12,16,178,63,5,0.0,0.0891586781967789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060177217715850065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11513174349959687,0.0,0.0,0.05261639218044936,0.0,0.06192415295920457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13761469281398314,0.0,0.0640320159419827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344432107436312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24395482074051705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3306333766164619,0.0,0.0,0.12962504153117307,0.0,0.2342921574870105,0.0,0.0,0.07702133310774198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464586830057766,0.0666489651511002,0.0,0.0,0.14910529966193142,0.0,0.0,0.07190438457402014,0.0,0.0,0.07093879061742786,0.0,0.11414564141594423,0.10751690829704752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862980302000129,0.0,0.04276618114722988,0.06311594089591104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010478453220016,0.06740901765343711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128266970381867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325272662799182,0.0,0.04135530827521574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14705295580582536,0.0,0.06644692978297738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794933514507062,0.0,0.0,0.10045961799828372,0.0,0.0,0.16393812995636536,0.0,0.0,0.07583407405653779,0.0,0.07598082124257524,0.3525265070682768,0.0,0.0,0.055317242823725236,0.0,0.11607453064535828,0.0,0.0,0.07061681608472282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057230844615635275,0.0,0.0,0.0835559696984006,0.0,0.0,0.05216871901197061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16226396910354784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04820693261371023,0.07736930132063287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11968328244215108,0.15067630399649845,0.15231357897074896,0.0,0.0,0.07850192647632608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06375888998829518,0.05793095300787071,0.0,0.0,0.053262177907732036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024145928434631,0.06577161993813005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049992606685323834,0.0,0.1478650433424642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380876914804028,0.0,0.05108965756025029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044384266827999584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08653352732359175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21382112396887312,0.08227381582980281,0.0,0.04845838780662446
mentalhealth,hlola27,2020/03/06,"Why do I feel sad when I dress nice? When I dress up nice and look in the mirror, I get sad all of a sudden. I feel pretty, but I feel sad at the same time.",-0.6241441441441431,0.07543991891891899,1.9767567567567568,102.8572072072072,82.24324324324324,4.933333333333334,12.333333333333336,3.1291,-1.817731531531532,115,0,34,0,3,40,24,37,0.21600000000000005,0.629,0.155,-0.5187,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,6,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,6,2,4,6,2,7,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,4,20,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6486728377121381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22342078427624548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3591043259600517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4350568710831244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.249356455161682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3858725994900493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway_bitch09876,2020/03/06,"Hmmm.... fuck him Let me explain. I am a self harmer, and nearly decided to just fucking die. But I was a coward and quit. Obviously I was a little bit freaked, so I went to (probably not the best decision) omegle and under mental health and help form things the 1st person said this exact thing. ""You pussy. Try agian. Dont be a fucking coward, the pain will go away.""

I be thinking, fuck that guy, so I see another few people on there and we talk and I be feeling better but damn fuck that first guy.",0.4554538461538478,2.8726789300000064,2.396000000000001,91.58530769230772,89.7,5.0769230769230775,18.69230769230769,6.67199483983844,0.2220538461538468,383,11,79,5,13,127,72,100,0.24,0.7120000000000001,0.048,-0.96,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,1,0,4,4,10,6,0,7,0,9,7,0,0,2,18,21,10,1,0,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,4,5,7,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,8,0,1,4,3,11,2,6,12,4,8,0,0,1,5,11,5,6,0,1,55,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802140832829286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262701166338353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481415537866924,0.12484694442403603,0.1541131171346039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14650460496560574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654416433306791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137610700911205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200729279502368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6525132478716157,0.0,0.0,0.0802260204788521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27954655046504945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500493583360065,0.0,0.0,0.09461838809331777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14434843376359352,0.0,0.0,0.14148211894229276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14225880859714454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15020707482159787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09786444820502596,0.12325783238150165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15219727549982875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15014391681751485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427806195683506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248840247669616,0.0,0.14726349166967914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346123814534186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18756446239239566,0.09045136386701136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584021307807768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308592452604449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SadTrowaway1,2020/03/06,"Sad and lost First post ever and a throwaway so forgive me this might be long,

Not really sure where to post but maybe here is the right place.

This i about my (26f) Boyfriend (26m). who is having some issues and i don't know how to cope with it anymore, he was diagnosed with clinical depression with psychosis, He is very into the Magick works Tarot card, crystals ect ect. 

Now he believes that all his mental issues are magick related, i'm not one to put down somebody's believes but where does one draw the line? We have been together for about 9 months, the first 2 months where amazing,, until one day that started the downhill battle, He ended up baker acted and spend a week in the hospital, 

he was okay after that for about a month but refusing to take his meds ,i didn't push him to take them as he seemed like good old him, after that is has been a constant struggle of him thinking that everybody is spying on him and he is being followed and him hallucination, he would take his meds for 2 days and quit, he would go see his family and not come home for a week as they kept him hostage a couple of times, more baker acts,

He would go from being super close with me to  thinking i'm a Russian spy , and then realizing that the voices just don't want us together as i make him happy and keep him save 

He doesn't seem to realize that things that he said hurt me , and i beat myself up over being impatient with him from time to time, and letting the things he say get to me, 

Im lost on how to keep strong, how to fight a war i feel like i'm losing, how do i keep from losing my mind ?

now he is going for a walk as he needs space and heal , now i know i'm clingy just to much has happened and i'm scared that he wont come back or get baker acted again.

​

Thanks for reading my post,, i'm sure it wont make no sense at all, i'm just here crying and venting",9.250807560137456,5.2108788917525795,8.913463917525775,77.22878694158081,62.917525773195884,11.893058419243989,35.40274914089347,8.841846274778883,2.7378963573883164,1462,37,320,15,15,474,196,388,0.139,0.767,0.094,-0.9493,1,0,0,0,1,0,40.0,2,0,2,11,23,25,3,2,17,1,32,3,0,6,5,70,72,30,1,5,10,0,1,2,0,6,3,3,1,0,16,25,0,5,10,1,1,12,10,12,0,5,9,5,33,13,47,52,5,58,0,7,1,0,39,16,0,5,29,198,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373908545052692,0.1051253281010468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579974173514164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652477926791353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949458051093327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905021324599982,0.0,0.0934920987654866,0.0,0.0,0.09572732358058232,0.0950327858083355,0.11159017736128857,0.0,0.07451533740054499,0.08781101543801775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570995570428334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662670834226197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825787000435334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155874598309057,0.0,0.04374463906273967,0.061806411811958874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717941659998074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040114830535656,0.0,0.1475055921236775,0.07256476951763421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765050259799533,0.09209694324964796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678170925865007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261621451528768,0.0,0.09345116477884448,0.18059859484636184,0.0,0.2306958144729176,0.0,0.0,0.09509288369069237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884675614691911,0.0,0.08453382531787525,0.0,0.0,0.07656314980569437,0.0,0.19357655658036016,0.18888292475108956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549901534221295,0.0,0.08691605633376523,0.0,0.1921975673669714,0.0,0.08718688222633107,0.09177885975355077,0.08735559833166064,0.0,0.2071666060027708,0.0,0.0635985603458647,0.06414985777522315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078305445099577,0.0,0.17587463252724947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090389876061818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485726809486045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697158110129494,0.0,0.09201946875317407,0.08653852213542942,0.0,0.055423794759473066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388343115944647,0.08229568129284583,0.06880028786904492,0.08661671771087581,0.0,0.06894134145560878,0.15752021357812818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123584009079069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09044437733054983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16307893446689958,0.0,0.1951457871601895,0.0,0.0,0.07965148954090301,0.0,0.0,0.11495358954369272,0.11087077821685663,0.0,0.0,0.15134296898781804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406702490683638,0.0,0.0,0.07138402627763797,0.05102885335884492,0.0,0.13879440533047893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298403041029348,0.0,0.0,0.18437355553794768,0.0,0.1051253281010468,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway0530693,2020/03/06,"Overcoming guilt of cheating and lying I previously cheated on my girlfriend and then faked dissociative identity disorder to avoid breaking up. We have broken up now, but it still remains a secret that I didn't have dissociative identity disorder. 

I'm now filled with immense guilt and self loathe, and don't know what to do.",9.918908045977012,9.736409396551725,9.446551724137931,61.77028735632186,58.48275862068965,13.250574712643678,43.4712643678161,12.45797560212912,5.845636781609192,267,14,41,8,3,86,43,58,0.366,0.634,0.0,-0.9648,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,3,6,2,3,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,10,7,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,6,0,0,1,0,4,0,7,6,0,9,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,29,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8494100659269509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20365544087314172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3865850627816108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959374774152087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,euphemisery,2020/03/06,"How do you handle recurring intrusive thoughts wondering if you acted weird or looked weird or sounded weird? I’m taking part in a month long off site training session for work. Myself and about 25 other people are participating and we’re all taking daily classes together. We were all strangers to begin with - working in offices spread across the country. We’re just over a week in and lots of people seem to have made friends but I struggle with that...always have. I just don’t make connections quickly or easily. I don’t like that about myself but I’ve come to accept and sort of expect it. What I’m struggling with is now wondering every day if I’ve done or said something weird that’s alienated people. Everyone is cordial and polite and no ones treated me poorly, I just feel tolerated rather than accepted and can’t pinpoint why. I do chat with people at activities and events but don’t get invited to after hours things, so I feel like I must’ve done something to not be included.

How do you handle these types of thoughts?",4.712499999999999,6.773274586734698,5.201785714285716,79.58696428571429,70.98979591836735,7.961224489795918,29.086734693877553,8.660442795831766,2.4186591836734697,833,33,145,15,16,266,121,196,0.08,0.8270000000000001,0.09300000000000001,0.6715,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,1,3,0,2,11,12,0,2,3,0,16,0,0,4,2,46,34,20,0,4,14,0,2,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,7,14,0,0,9,1,1,2,6,6,0,1,7,5,14,6,24,26,4,21,0,0,1,0,7,8,0,11,13,97,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207536624456048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12501030477185074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359209743937716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29702169351464297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222720837268912,0.1386709021117052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675673498949404,0.10367564338489604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121213920740541,0.0,0.07582058995599053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14291656818313653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14179918346143774,0.0,0.0,0.1284289701176873,0.12186646796644658,0.0,0.0,0.123378079336003,0.0,0.13731855137938165,0.09687048944337022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158355071129084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833885702031478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15715367758588875,0.0,0.4024390651702127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804486388551818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211420150488984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22344499744720075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30342738675137704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822832987229526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641303390661823,0.0,0.0,0.2304223324344451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640862856300953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095061068719852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147586262547362,0.21130202140282048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,haseren4,2020/03/06,"Today I learned that I saved someone's life Today my friend said to someone ""If it wasn't for \*\*\*\*\* I would not be here"" right in front of me. I kind knew it already. That night was pretty scary. Me and the wife were just about to start making dinner when my friend sent me a super long text that was clearly a cry for help. I just looked at my wife and said ""Put the food back in the box we have to go now!"" I called my friend and they tried the ""no no Im fine"" routine but I was adamant and already headed towards their home. We had a nice dinner, nothing fancy, but we made a plan for the next day and got them to the services that they needed.  
I've been around this friend everyday, we work together, and they have made so much improvement and I am super proud of the person they are becoming. But today, I don't know. I just was not ready to actually hear that.",0.8048838576889139,2.935634245810057,2.0596295207291995,97.07598353425465,83.63687150837991,4.885739488385768,18.359600117612466,6.05967700443912,-0.3767273743016766,666,16,152,5,19,212,105,179,0.052000000000000005,0.73,0.21899999999999997,0.9852,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,4,0,6,5,10,11,0,0,11,0,15,5,1,3,1,31,29,13,0,3,9,2,0,0,4,1,1,3,1,1,8,12,3,0,3,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,15,4,27,11,16,12,1,22,0,0,1,0,23,6,0,1,12,101,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.12646010163779642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28600921198639084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536162158822175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964588763867124,0.0,0.0,0.14312079120459953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232478579816326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234735388614414,0.08357413881931927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566994477836453,0.0,0.4004803414895957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364837493929619,0.0,0.10364410499156836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13299562794114667,0.0,0.14605614163704694,0.0,0.08686072773964182,0.0,0.12998826219405654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399782812920523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494692825763552,0.07121868653873369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153249321431804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468212456708925,0.10882206286535072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452403565991637,0.08650161662932704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526277378062542,0.0960885491128532,0.0,0.0,0.13781929653986166,0.12161043161937465,0.0,0.12434407276373333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315205464828812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318385292308544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302726667198009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066823762051413,0.2465374947951184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196005586472834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172371119898866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685054578222821,0.0,0.0,0.08798237660182764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434228397841328,0.0,0.0,0.0920562573367702,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blue_dragon08,2020/03/06,"Mood Fluctuations On some days (like today) I am super motivated and focused.  I can process good amounts of information and think clearly and logically. During this period, I know I can be really good at the work I do. 

On other days, I can't think about anything clearly. I have no motivation to do or learn anything. My outlook on life is very bleak. 

Have any of you experienced anything similar? What did you do? How to control the fluctuations?",3.0034146341463384,5.974738121951223,5.020195121951222,73.67541463414635,82.41463414634146,8.158048780487805,30.151219512195123,8.841846274778883,3.310186341463416,354,18,60,10,10,121,57,82,0.024,0.716,0.26,0.9659,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,5,2,5,0,0,2,0,12,1,0,4,2,17,15,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,8,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,10,4,9,13,2,8,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,5,43,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16258538423754876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5902375206733597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681531440810539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083789267587555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4010647939360188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13139436690735026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16887216799211272,0.11680441299926556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15316339438629675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30639087062947074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22662376821626296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972694186150956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740560698096451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xbanana_stand_moneyx,2020/03/06,"I feel like I’m the worst friend So the title says it all. I make plans with, why I would call, my best friends yet I still cancel them and make up a reason why I can’t hang out yet they only real reason I don’t hang out is due to my anxiety. I have anxiety when I leave my home. I work 40 hours because I can’t afford to not work 40 hours but if I could, I would stay home 24/7. I’m not fully comfortable with anyone ever. I only trust my sister and that’s all. I don’t know why I have these issues and I want to hang out with my friends and not let them down but I always get severe anxiety the day before and cancel plans. Please give me some advise. I don’t want to lose my friends because of my own stupid problems.",-0.11908041697691728,1.8185184620253203,2.0005286671630667,97.27362248696949,85.89873417721519,4.730305286671632,15.623231571109455,5.900188976854957,-0.7628589724497394,559,10,133,4,17,187,85,158,0.187,0.6509999999999999,0.162,-0.507,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,6,6,12,1,0,4,0,12,0,0,4,3,34,22,10,0,7,6,1,1,1,4,2,0,1,2,0,3,11,0,0,4,0,0,3,8,4,0,0,0,2,29,8,13,18,6,18,0,1,0,0,12,5,0,2,10,84,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287674324921896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837482576921542,0.0,0.0,0.08645058349931017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15073718789696475,0.0,0.10520685496331687,0.0,0.12975048191705307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262482495558778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871490437692544,0.0,0.0,0.07973629936701887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183767421194303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251510157055855,0.08832703149281378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3820897331488705,0.0,0.06459576635549624,0.11860486192028565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480380446614397,0.0,0.24351710404906546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904597845838728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794822645621611,0.0,0.0,0.1309148191157997,0.0,0.1264282597694782,0.0,0.06040329499936506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831932730024327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16505868673558413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18806458239143256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571742630422304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830489456050346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072714301276978,0.0,0.25424096814406616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832192187134807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13967577881912968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178168666659862,0.09873748840727316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14584982384616516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33469226724441353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18001991296695585,0.0,0.0,0.17565781466156724,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,keepitgoin-slow,2020/03/06,"Im so fucking tired I have -$70 from accidentally overdrawing by ONE dollar and then getting a $40 THERAPY charge. I fucking dropped out of school again. My SO clearly wants to get rid of me but is too scared to go through with it. I’m stuck in an emotionally abusive house where I’m manipulated, told I’m a loser and a failure just about every fucking day. I don’t even know if I have enough gas to get work tomorrow. 

I have so much fucking trauma and life just seems to keep shitting on me no matter how hard I claw to be even a LITTLE bit better. I’m trying so fucking hard not to let it get to me but I’m tired of putting my heart into everything I do and never having ANYTHING to show for it. I’ve been severely suicidal for the last few weeks and I don’t even know why I keep hanging on anymore. I feel so unlovable and sick. I really don’t know how much I have left in me. Lately I’ve had this cold and wet feeling in my heart like it’s crying. It hurts constantly. I’m tired of loving and hoping so much just to get pushed down over and over. I want to rest",2.2838815467449862,3.5852045859030848,4.091328928046991,88.19155041605484,75.82819383259911,6.982770435633872,24.94591287322565,7.594959193182576,1.0916835046500246,839,28,186,11,18,284,128,227,0.301,0.612,0.086,-0.9964,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,19,15,6,1,6,0,14,14,3,3,2,36,45,21,1,4,7,0,5,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,6,12,0,2,6,1,1,4,6,11,0,1,4,6,20,4,31,39,7,27,0,2,0,6,2,13,6,3,10,117,26,2,0.0,0.11682004982210685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778066510753138,0.0,0.0,0.08113604620651936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720008426185623,0.10764121510536157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654716919554608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083029950375092,0.06358621565282135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109071461365184,0.0,0.10187594794281546,0.0,0.19536503779030104,0.0,0.08307132008889907,0.0,0.08861166081503699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997061253551924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4557517243123485,0.257561509773225,0.0,0.056034336907667764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664516702129168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336732941362353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792800137812592,0.0,0.11376646089784236,0.10554897802608963,0.0,0.1065005192597954,0.0,0.0,0.17527317853177532,0.0,0.0,0.16255722732194433,0.08036883913856377,0.1112204990997048,0.0,0.10712476212093296,0.10082101444550044,0.06964121838394123,0.04816898918636396,0.09881901996264378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898667268532515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21743805067724614,0.0,0.0760432564014745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681115116151748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099116138039086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316307490870844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871172215582366,0.09978434092907586,0.0,0.08975802805500334,0.0,0.11138533220093944,0.10120730120973254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784794031203616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275303413709548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33996453877945093,0.0,0.09421263255861538,0.0,0.06694016176877818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630886341138952,0.0,0.07908770464783338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896748762809081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717790084226914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,--skokie--,2020/03/06,"I have ADHD, Dyslexia, Annorexia, clinical depression, severe anxiety and ptsd. Ask me anything. (No judgment about any questions) I want to help people understand and also let people know they're not alone 😊",5.418428571428574,8.873081628571434,6.028214285714286,67.42803571428573,75.57142857142857,9.214285714285714,34.464285714285715,9.516144504307137,4.725428571428573,167,9,21,5,4,54,32,35,0.207,0.645,0.14800000000000002,-0.504,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,7,6,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,12,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3048078504202369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626789135162557,0.0,0.2028237458271806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17247363336012564,0.0,0.1940223590135496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20871168753043012,0.0,0.2371050504176493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21844676003882105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999942841814375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938561556340925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25934865016579384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516631511604961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964739429334026,0.0,0.2841179396902205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865239525059293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640324718794249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495945408502472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Guilty0nee,2020/03/06,I am disassociating really bad right now. I'm having a hard time dealing with reality or thinking at the moment.,4.23,6.860714142857147,8.171666666666667,55.17750000000001,74.23809523809524,9.914285714285716,29.54761904761905,10.125756701596842,3.9353619047619053,91,4,14,3,2,35,20,21,0.245,0.755,0.0,-0.6361,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,3,9,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3956843409567431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4885671719158076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4245187800399585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30359066093877835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4047055925250821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3036541704129627,0.0,0.0,0.27633324990253416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MonetRise,2020/03/06,"Question I have these weird blank spots in my memory. I have always kind of thought that it was just a weird brain thing, but I kind of want a name for it. I'm not sure if it is because of my childhood or somthing? I thought it might be linked to my anxiety because when I have panic attacks I get blank spots afterwards sometimes... any ideas?",3.832173913043477,4.978087579710149,3.9862028985507263,91.06278260869568,71.7536231884058,7.259130434782609,29.74202898550725,7.554174236665415,1.592649855072464,269,11,58,3,5,83,47,69,0.22699999999999998,0.759,0.013999999999999999,-0.9305,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,1,1,2,0,7,1,1,0,1,14,12,4,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,9,3,6,7,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,4,3,37,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833939688314059,0.0,0.0,0.14988242887196704,0.0,0.1686086264774124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507416209930582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26871273589932193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24604400368830165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515210909177565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488095388262781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4590341607780622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23381404924108545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585968656522355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469031703991133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21798541117631964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20772837075997894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146426771471023,0.0,0.0,0.3499526655895694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000012055063145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,boyonmybike,2020/03/06,"INTERNAL CONVERSATIONS I have full on conversations/discussions/arguments within my mind all the time.
I am not delusional or hallucinating- I am well aware that it is myself and my inner thoughts., at least I feel like it is.

It gets weird because, I will answer outloud for one point view and remain silent, but still answer (within my mind) for the opposing view.

Imagine having a conversation where only one person is talking outloud, so every other sentance is on mute.


So my question is:
-is this normal? 
OR
-should I take this as a sign of the beginnings of something else",4.73855769230769,7.530909586538467,5.485230769230771,74.25976923076921,73.32692307692308,8.006153846153849,29.63076923076923,8.841846274778883,2.923399230769232,463,20,73,10,10,150,72,104,0.013999999999999999,0.951,0.035,0.2382,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,5,0,12,0,0,0,1,19,17,8,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,7,2,0,1,6,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,1,3,11,2,10,14,3,12,0,0,2,0,5,9,0,3,4,61,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513386973061015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19888873196684834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005961395777008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038248469566948,0.1700873428942038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438912613648803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163158749349866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4807941820783915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332718875477248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226639227449465,0.18107370173574386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20788587024497215,0.0,0.0,0.22506644898145955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667087025023288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18328878730803846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013428577192354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17900962830015102,0.19136299718391225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18901219701989014,0.13882876498948798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140662166267408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,serious-alt-account,2020/03/06,"I think I need help [I don’t know what sub to post this on, but I needed to post this somewhere]

I’m very antisocial. I’ve been depressed and suicidal for a few years now. I’ve been thinking about going to my school counselor because my relationship with my parents isn’t very good so I can’t talk to them about this. I have been very scared and have been putting it off for a while now. I realize that I should go but I am very nervous. I don’t want to go and then have them tell my parents because they get mad at everything that I do. I don’t want to go and have nothing happen because then that means I’m helpless. I don’t want to go and then have to do more because I hate talking to people. My friends are telling me that I really need to go but every time they bring it up I say that I will tomorrow. I can’t bring myself to go. I keep thinking of everything that could go wrong. I keep going through the lists and I can always find more cons than pros. I need some sort of assurance that this might be a good thing. 
Please help. I don’t know what to do.",1.0041512469831062,2.913161353982304,2.4614963797264693,95.71172164119068,81.47787610619469,5.702011263073209,22.21962992759453,6.782984794422108,0.3556973451327439,830,27,194,9,22,269,106,226,0.152,0.7240000000000001,0.124,-0.9139,2,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,4,0,5,11,2,2,4,0,28,0,0,0,1,33,59,14,1,9,3,2,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,16,7,0,2,8,0,0,12,8,7,0,0,4,1,34,4,25,50,4,27,0,2,0,0,15,4,0,3,9,127,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118064760228623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378952160563461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789651589089748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840312995404165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220145658191821,0.0,0.17536756563742867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917127143682321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537731803987079,0.0,0.050972901935685724,0.0,0.4990282683283101,0.16366326976794995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627508079191468,0.0,0.0,0.09632375756074248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078951492405688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734378430442187,0.0,0.0,0.10723669612634824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627525315890557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034994556083442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893683959428984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936148094982411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21666544165164975,0.0,0.0,0.06763824647077127,0.0,0.0,0.10709542516914797,0.0,0.0,0.18687772780769646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807826466304223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250167632020658,0.0,0.0,0.10474668681907902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758641106747928,0.09767808353394196,0.09873947060981944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671863374172892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683569123029878,0.17054959847246173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648168541750539,0.18754425396760574,0.0,0.0,0.05689006140212545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322000420519778,0.1726364401499599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667037141376112,0.0,0.06282769521882638
mentalhealth,SafferonEagle,2020/03/06,"I really want a little help. Im not sure which subreddit to use, but I really am sad. I'm not an optimist and I'm scared about corona. i really want a little reasurance. Sorry if I should not have posted here.",-0.3149242424242402,1.9467422045454548,3.629090909090909,82.10530303030306,92.86363636363636,8.387878787878789,14.151515151515152,8.841846274778883,1.421587878787879,163,3,33,6,6,61,30,44,0.313,0.579,0.10800000000000001,-0.8903,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,3,0,0,1,1,11,8,3,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,7,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17010696636968642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741317210650834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5087191725374206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24305620659183325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48774416931008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540834023340728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28409191464859285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23918968308563815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21918905340858705,0.0,0.0,0.2993783422248937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SenpaiSquiggle,2020/03/06,"My Life is a Fucking Lie Now, I probably have no right to be depressed. If you don’t give a shit about some random teenager and don’t wanna read all of this, I don’t blame you one bit. I live in a wealthy family and I’m spoiled af. I also go to a private school. But nobody cares about me. All of my “friends” want me to die in a hole and rightfully so. I might as well kill myself right now and I definitely would if pain wasn’t a factor. I think I’m definitely going to be dead by October of this year. I’m just gonna go through a couple of my friends and why they hate me. The first one who I’m talking about has all the right in the world to hate me. Right now, I’d love to give him a gun to shoot me. He’s in a terrible family situation and his mom just had surgery. His dad isn’t with him either. And my ass has the audacity to insult him constantly about his breath, body odor, haircuts, being a pervert, anime stuff, and literally so much more. That’s how great of a friend I am. Another one is so nice to me but I complain so much around him and he doesn’t mind. He acts so kind and deserves better friends then me. My grades aren’t currently reaching my insane standards so I’m disappointed all the time. I still have a b in the fucking easiest class(art). Every time I see a post with my friends in it, I feel awful. Nobody ever invites me to like anything and I’m an only child so my life is boring. My friends are under the impression that I do math everyday when I don’t and just play on my console for the whole day. The math thing is because I’m good at math and bc I’m Asian. It gets boring after a while and people ignore my texts even when they see them. Nobody responds to me but the moment someone else says something, somebody else responds. I cry for an average of probably an hour a day. During ski club, I skied alone for pretty much the whole time and I was crying then too. I was once skiing with 3 other “friends” and I was supposed to go on the chairlift with one of them. Then he ditched me to go on it with the other two. So now I was by myself and I was on the chairlift alone. What made everything even better was that when they got to the top of the hill, they fucking ditched me. So I cried for an hour straight and made a cut on my throat that night. And yes, I’m aware that nobody asked and that I’m a bitch looking for sympathy and advice. If I had one wish, I would want to be able to commit suicide without feeling pain. I need fucking help",1.3250789298444907,3.1866352687140136,3.0292874769869584,92.28201261310669,80.19001919385795,5.942120725449487,22.916722159113164,6.956979308442209,0.6079811273453721,1929,64,431,22,49,639,235,521,0.165,0.6629999999999999,0.172,0.6639,2,2,1,2,0,5,50.0,0,2,6,4,32,39,11,0,37,2,34,14,5,3,6,63,75,46,4,10,11,2,2,1,7,4,4,1,0,1,17,27,0,1,3,6,0,6,10,20,1,7,12,7,65,19,59,55,13,57,0,2,3,6,41,22,7,6,29,290,82,6,0.06977892934891881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818716216878402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14453985316292786,0.0,0.05580218458989758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316929155927139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05742211330405929,0.062118041112658624,0.06523387947817666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04253658766649447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234275849691451,0.07618051826476653,0.07750865997306518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07114426899307975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540623320737834,0.0,0.0,0.07720905810813078,0.2299466319710729,0.09000327352651487,0.0,0.06010048960015699,0.0,0.07241951199200511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658268326874853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217664946840927,0.063119036515195,0.058791757517009186,0.0,0.06271280232747006,0.0,0.13156272884896655,0.0,0.0705646466020988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059353921657607764,0.0,0.0,0.3773771940459947,0.2580379831215514,0.03645661056571015,0.1338766147128393,0.19828486802524226,0.05852725529899387,0.05580858422683855,0.07693151594844375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13778449271138699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04677134546587722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743637902750747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720004671608233,0.07266401704594842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857384281449227,0.034090460210016375,0.0,0.06161607302434403,0.0,0.058596726380659186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297820808869291,0.13205302026774965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402441696643516,0.07045682690566549,0.08172423870252513,0.0,0.0,0.15388662581390827,0.05174019194661998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548279823965084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074312282418706,0.2364200420985653,0.053070020128834605,0.14849940121514238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483759236239618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682892563862734,0.07099025712577882,0.15046697570766393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979781251819563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979541219919209,0.0,0.05549100533940679,0.0,0.07062000182034847,0.11120954476530044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162706822650616,0.0,0.0784344402107167,0.0,0.0,0.05912346039615436,0.0537192289028416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05572554311516418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988017964193211,0.0763268231291946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056085660231795134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04635802006595281,0.04471152037711077,0.0,0.0,0.1220659645519194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816387469889967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231484087942315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273963759720305,0.0,0.06296463031923331,0.15581136533767792,0.08024232505608457,0.0672643978254571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913789870836574,0.0,0.0,0.04493534270863893
mentalhealth,nerf-gun-wimp,2020/03/06,"Where did my motivation go? I posted this on another sub, but I felt like this also belonged here.

I have had depressive episodes in the past. I'm only 15, and this might be my third relapse. I can't find the motivation to live or do anything that I usually enjoy. I feel like the days are just passing me by. My grandfather died almost a month ago, maybe that has something to do with it? I just feel like everything I do blocks time that I could be using for something else. My art is the only thing I can focus on lately, but I need to do stuff for school. I feel like everything is too much and like the only thing I can do is curl up and cry. Or maybe sleep. I have such a lack of motivation that I almost feel like I can't have friends and go to school at the same time. Like if I have friends, they'll just distract me. I feel like I have no time anymore. And the stress has just been getting to me. I just want to know what to do. Am I overreacting? Is this normal? I feel like I can't tell anyone this because they'll just tell me things that I already know.

Sorry for the vent.",1.445334591986576,3.271890546255509,2.9728508495909374,93.00165932452278,79.66079295154185,6.085924061254459,21.382211034193414,7.07126945348624,0.39023784350744695,842,24,192,10,21,276,111,227,0.141,0.6829999999999999,0.17600000000000002,0.8270000000000001,0,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,3,11,15,0,2,10,0,33,1,1,4,0,41,49,11,1,6,11,0,7,9,2,3,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,1,13,1,0,3,4,3,0,1,4,7,34,12,18,39,3,19,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,6,18,135,50,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346798061011874,0.0,0.18857713412929367,0.0,0.103908924615726,0.07530045945572604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873594220288977,0.0,0.0,0.0933823379781716,0.06583950964298152,0.0,0.07748642004774171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05739962724587809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517983841812287,0.0,0.1034313570634727,0.06072600829943954,0.0,0.08110066861477712,0.0,0.09772417633170402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865937220231563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16925153965637202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856635640442798,0.4036115111995825,0.0904092565091844,0.0,0.08606138158410655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14549699754392073,0.0,0.04919519810866762,0.0,0.1070276497248234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349676612704944,0.0,0.10621762723343964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4140204549630666,0.0,0.08314582381835005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18919461490558687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09988986362236324,0.0,0.0,0.07515835373669852,0.0,0.06921911578097682,0.06981913440380404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922577163899446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148408845493128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988725953538855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901801397652132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19059177065978766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422892908711948,0.0,0.0,0.14497936407757098,0.0,0.10540544892235612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786102396142704,0.0,0.10779173382994006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646016013526698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876690080905534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647179816026405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132480856407523,0.10370495834596813,0.0,0.05553855448311329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThatWasInformative,2020/03/06,"Keep pushing! You're 1 in 400 trillion! 
Are You a Miracle? On the Probability of Your Being Born


""Previously, I had heard the Buddhist version of the probability of ""this precious incarnation."" Imagine there was one life preserver thrown somewhere in some ocean, with exactly one turtle in all of these oceans, swimming underwater somewhere. The probability that you came about is the same as that turtle sticking its head out of the water -- into the middle of that life preserver. On one try.""


https://www.huffpost.com/entry/probability-being-born_b_877853

Credit to huffpost.com and Dr Ali Binazir",8.654086021505378,12.442219354838713,7.599139784946238,58.985376344086035,65.12903225806451,9.29462365591398,35.064516129032256,9.725611199111238,4.341980645161291,492,23,63,12,9,151,67,93,0.0,0.885,0.115,0.9073,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,0,8,0,5,5,1,0,2,11,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,5,1,1,1,1,1,3,0,0,0,4,4,1,4,2,17,3,4,12,0,0,0,0,4,8,0,1,1,49,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544608262945689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283313355683952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19775275884213656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31429208233490025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4522799064049794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7196216222410056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510510824075111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tby2002,2020/03/06,"If I have traits like cluster b and pyschopathic traits how come I have not killed anyone? I have some traits like hpd but it's always been seemingly the product of my environment like I've alwas just wanted to belong no matter if that was as the lowest person just that I was allowed to socialize like with everyone else. And then on top of it when I was a kid I had stuff that was more like people certain traits where like I had no regard for right or wrong when I was as young as 3 to me that was a matter of made up stuff my mom made up but was not real. I did not really believe in religion either for those reasons and when I did I just wanted to do everything wrong that's just how I always regarded everything kind of like go against what you're told. Aside from that I had really bad bouts of boredum back then I never had empathy or guilt if I got away with it. If I didn't though and that's how I've always lived my life is if I didn't when I didn't it hurt like hell. Then you know like physical abuse for example I was never hit but when kids were I just thought well I never really could sympathize with them if anything I didn't mind laughing at them. But I wouldn't to their face because then I would be judged for it. Then like things like true altruism I never believed in I kind of felt like we all do things for a reason that's why we're breathing. If we didn't we wouldn't be here. That reason is our own satisfaction we can't feel someone else's satisfaction because that is in someone else. But we trick our minds into thinking we can.

​

​

​

And I actually feel like I have done this so many times. I have a thing in my adult years called devotion. I will be committed to something and not really give up on it. No matter what. That's my love for the company love for my family member love for my dog or whoever. At that time with that said that devotion is always my life tied in. I can easily mentally think if I have a new plan to walk away and move on to the next option. For example when I was a kid my mom went to jail. I did not cry did not feel any sadness I was like guess I'm staying with grandma for a week because one I knew why she was going away and secondarily my needs were met.  With that said I had a devotion to mother as an adult. Then also added to that I don't mind attacking smaller animals. But it's just specific animals. Usually prey animals. I love attacking them tbh. And this is tied into my adrenaline side. I have a lot of excitement strangling animals for example or beat them with something. With that I like seeing people fight. Again it works in my adrenaline line. If I am comfortable and know I'm not hurt then I usually don't mind seeing others get hurt. Am I excited to see it on a picture? No but I don't want to ever become it either. I don't like death for me. For others I don't mind it. I'm like a live and let live type. Lastly I do like to see dead people. Sometimes I think my adrenaline is off or something like one time I had to take a painkiller and after I was off it I remember feeling like I wanted to randomly kick this like 9 year old. For no reason at all. It's like a surge of feelings but I never really got what that is. Sometimes I have even wanted to see someone die or already die but that is more because of my mother in how she told me when she first saw a dead person how peaceful they looked. It's that curiosity of those who passed on kind of thing. But then there's things like I've always wanted to see dead people or injured people but that's more like an adrenaline thing when like they look dead. Now that part though I never want to kill anyone though. I'm a very anxious person I would be forever scared that I would go to jail like I said my thing is if I do get caught. I'm not one of those stupids who would say I won't get caught like an idiot. I gave the government technically my dna (through dna testing gedmatch and whatnot) so if I ever do anything well it would lead back to me and so obviously I have no intent to ever hurt anyone. Nor do I care to.

​

In a world where it was legal to kill people I still wouldn't because someone could kill me too. I am not a homicidal person in any sense of the way. And I am not a psychopath either if I were I'd be able to manipulate people I don't do that I don't really care about people that way. I care about their amusement but not really them giving me anything in return. And that's how I relate well with hpd in many ways because I do crave attention. I have never committed a crime. I have a lot of sympathy for dogs but not cats also. I was so sad with seeing all the dogs in the shelter I wanted to take them all home with me. But cats I've tortured cats when I was a kid. And rodents. Then friendships as I said have never developed. I know I don't really want to trick them into being my friend I just want them to really be my friend. I realize when people smile that does make me uncomfortable because I feel they are going to hurt me in some way but that has always proven to be true. smiling can also be really just laughing at you. I have never made friends and I have no real desire for romantic relationships. Just meaningless sex. Friends I've tried to make but I think for me I push myself so heavily on people and people push me away but I really don't know how else to be social to people. If I am quiet people say I don't want to socialize with them and stay to myself if I am friendly I am too much. I feel like most of the time people don't want me around and are uncomfortable and feel it's more comfortable to them to say I like to keep to myself rather than they don't like me and I need to stay to myself which feels like more of the truth for me.

​

Anyhow I don't get how are my traits similar to this if I have not killed anyone used anyone and am otherwise not interested in using people in this manner?",2.9269783834586462,4.229643909902599,4.476288106630214,86.06799419002054,74.18668831168831,7.817238550922762,23.84504442925495,8.404138607990417,1.3432307142857145,4675,134,992,81,95,1567,363,1232,0.11900000000000001,0.6629999999999999,0.218,0.9992,2,0,3,0,2,1,90.0,8,2,16,6,62,90,14,2,34,0,119,10,2,23,23,228,212,107,12,41,66,4,10,31,5,10,3,8,1,10,70,47,0,1,28,1,0,14,54,26,3,4,55,28,165,64,138,133,20,118,1,7,10,5,73,44,1,32,84,710,235,6,0.02886590906206132,0.03420138205016214,0.028168963287129794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031854248446284705,0.0692521711438942,0.14411249243638322,0.15638100204347005,0.17537619520799208,0.03925961603280224,0.0,0.0,0.0326102608857786,0.0,0.10091857391004516,0.0,0.07126255086967907,0.025696778993344827,0.0,0.06567827755205967,0.10848188708570812,0.04439220456498918,0.02410182833699417,0.12317473168385855,0.031880128679750944,0.0,0.06504398928290826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029475320554476863,0.0,0.08829215430228816,0.0,0.0,0.02486542469470116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046094159091316166,0.0,0.03170784566600746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059916512534237326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025260751544138326,0.029539847000053125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964550521152109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019065660694619357,0.07833260205334938,0.0,0.02758261313015624,0.0518856355608393,0.0,0.0272122100635938,0.0,0.1313592385077068,0.08248724480647181,0.027715799478609787,0.0,0.0,0.024553327502032873,0.0,0.0,0.11150864868182583,0.0,0.0603249843538666,0.05538162052492593,0.0656206453404193,0.0,0.04617340885581449,0.0,0.031799053203223814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0289548603716114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15450776334934094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025657346282765926,0.1596792576846728,0.09017820684711836,0.06345579484707906,0.023529568567140592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029517347741131864,0.040777690473766885,0.43717517792444294,0.0,0.07646737964930965,0.0,0.04848018709432392,0.0,0.0,0.04908152725977599,0.10421043971537812,0.08194086330901401,0.0385364368927665,0.05853100221070165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029090047000288975,0.0,0.1457316970349766,0.06761480763791151,0.0,0.03067989308942665,0.02121976451468039,0.042807411621825664,0.2003685173595765,0.027878874847003382,0.030699221764100625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03028991579207652,0.0,0.05868086110815314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03125896655190925,0.0,0.3001798018009017,0.10081839353190236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571144812873136,0.2034146454890175,0.11871584850465752,0.0,0.030991183567756295,0.032699447894641555,0.02465132861835283,0.10983235897873116,0.06886598843671543,0.02889981066967408,0.0,0.16101674568432575,0.02627843948237564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882754773573781,0.09783196429947626,0.0666671611700864,0.05709824432352431,0.0,0.0,0.09230165498623613,0.023052352264576987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608911953564851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04340714241592539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13424059136545338,0.07398443589058469,0.08508182727974943,0.022916307441945564,0.06732777483031797,0.0,0.0,0.05516522626031247,0.0,0.01959805744510468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04986175473236552,0.06358344137389174,0.023817398058755386,0.20431033265662665,0.09164966006397404,0.02315449108479203,0.0,0.07786175670932419,0.026758986895698583,0.052093986247138055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0210147255884983,0.0,0.0,0.1025275679714865,0.06312068022608758,0.17537619520799208,0.03717739805992678
mentalhealth,plainclothesangel,2020/03/06,"MY JOB IS TO CONTINUE TO HEAL I don’t like feeling like this.
I don’t like this.
Why stress about life when I feel like I’m not even supposed to be here

I feel like my being here is a mistake

Or if it’s not a mistake

I feel underappreciated

Then I think, maybe there’s no reason to feel I should be appreciated, maybe I’m just delusional about what and who I am

I’m expected to just go out and continue to act normal, when clearly I am anything but.

Go get a job
Even though death is trying to befriend you,
Never mind that
Go get a job and make fifteen dollars an hour
You still won’t be able to afford anything 
But people won’t think less of you
If you can hit the pause button on being bipolar or possibly an m-f-ing alien, just turn it off if you could from 9-5, that’d be great.

Heal, but do it while keeping up with everyone else who’s never even imagined half the shit you’ve seen and experienced. Heal even though your experience is not valid to the people around you. Get over it. What’s wrong with you.

Nurture and reparent your inner child, but ignore the fact that the waves of her emotions are big and consuming and that I must continue to hold space to process them, ignore her anger about feeling constantly invalidated too, hit the pause button on all that and go out and get a job you lazy heroine. 

👀 😞",3.089646358543419,4.439901375000002,4.384957983193278,86.6942156862745,73.85294117647058,7.386834733893558,25.084733893557424,7.957251820313856,1.2263366246498606,1042,33,225,15,21,344,139,272,0.111,0.765,0.124,0.2144,6,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,10,1,0,20,15,2,1,13,0,23,6,1,2,6,57,48,24,1,10,15,0,6,5,0,4,5,0,0,1,15,14,0,4,10,0,1,5,10,8,0,1,1,8,25,7,27,33,2,28,0,0,1,0,16,11,1,5,17,147,40,4,0.10488485896370907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17262260431594595,0.0933697613591148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334327151098625,0.0,0.08374202532387225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761784113303335,0.11798134921810305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27710184061146403,0.0,0.0,0.10022197748170963,0.0,0.10259751789301952,0.0,0.0,0.3181976167766945,0.22478929260197847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21919203938250856,0.0,0.2384339296863968,0.0,0.0,0.11563592728356875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329045863331476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4163281540889892,0.09322648181511246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408327769985369,0.25620722075401864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001145780255323,0.0,0.21074187662452684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590380824101436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617873383585335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276489262029284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454279099401806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824191924193705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078391035632856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766280049032408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376118385371366,0.0,0.12014525157398101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441196511791792,0.20609768280465685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07120993441339715,0.11408460810707967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464227141853088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467512817581454,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Epiphanyv2,2020/03/06,"I need a psychoanalysis really bad. Conventional therapy does nothing for me, everyone I've ever talked to who is supposedly ""professionally"" trained come of as incompetent and narrow minded to me. Where can I find someone who can help me understand who I really am? I've struggled with understanding myself for about 6 years now. I have so many conflicting thoughts and I really feel like I'm going insane, in fact I'm almost most certain I've already gone insane. I've been on the verge of suicide many times.

I see myself as an extremely empathetic person yet I have a lot of thoughts suggesting the contrary, and I want help in sorting out my personality and mental state.",5.547177419354838,7.750854846774198,7.136322580645161,65.98448387096778,69.08064516129033,10.443870967741935,32.561290322580646,10.577609850970193,4.145376774193549,547,25,88,17,10,188,83,124,0.171,0.7170000000000001,0.111,-0.8705,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,5,0,7,0,0,0,3,24,20,7,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,7,0,1,6,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,4,2,14,2,15,16,2,16,1,0,1,0,9,7,0,4,6,55,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16085156323044442,0.0,0.1772634103833014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341225266919391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13837180900514953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057173488522445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14530248304334875,0.0,0.15349249501144616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122128388234381,0.11475683025589385,0.0,0.0,0.14681639770900431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912918994479724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153389217160878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847756857653226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656512605469467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32571495392576605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618811050644388,0.0,0.1621943626196524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910793919000195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413247878251946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805185044149928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30871840740573664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280043540321512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610451103144158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16792934183753527,0.0,0.17570732279496387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129111376610503,0.0,0.0,0.18369876798683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25505061388602895,0.09366686990015273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3344509350507935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474598656317418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344291092588616
mentalhealth,galsonthetown,2020/03/06,"Quick questions for a mental health providers outside of appointments? How common is it for psychiatrists to refuse to answer any questions (even if relatively urgent) outside of appointments? My new doctor has an online portal where it seemed like I should be able to message her, but her staff replied to me and said **she will not answer any questions at all** outside of appointments. I understand that she wouldn't want people to email her questions all the time, but I saw her recently and I thought it was a relatively quick question about my medication increase that could be kind of urgent. 

With other providers I've been able to send them an occasional quick question and they reply no problem. But now I'm wondering if that is not the norm and if my expectations are too high. 

I feel more anxious now that she won't answer my question (which she should probably know based on one of my illnesses), and kind of distrustful that she's not that interested in my treatment. This is a turn off to me. I don't know if my standards are too high by wanting her to occasionally answer a quick question between appointments because I'm not sure what is the norm. Anyone have any insight?",5.974297945205482,7.704863013698635,5.912508561643836,77.0517765410959,67.2648401826484,8.762671232876713,33.32220319634703,9.188382445141503,3.086883333333333,956,43,165,18,16,300,119,219,0.10300000000000001,0.868,0.028999999999999998,-0.9453,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,2,0,12,7,1,0,9,0,19,4,0,1,3,51,33,13,0,12,11,0,1,1,0,5,4,1,0,0,13,6,0,1,20,0,0,2,8,2,0,1,5,3,27,5,24,20,4,19,0,0,1,0,25,7,0,14,11,124,40,2,0.1827628544180392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18642751231438545,0.0,0.0,0.10323500205706382,0.0,0.06389601862855941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05570526985487595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296063385199496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353276291104932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06035657083279161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04620519530155128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713418393500417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19309899006966147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19031938857061811,0.1004416851265926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04464434948014661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205717409935453,0.09209098548563216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825675183218645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06192242004675625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633523756320095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985246342720237,0.0874396845077165,0.0,0.0,0.8189448967694714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902281350313855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692466341204774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08319021928470854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612591368973183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254664579949044,0.05328524507555051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939675196601856,0.0,0.0951312884637106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107798266758038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909925973747784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shawnb215,2020/03/06,"How do I see a Therapist without Health Insurance? I am not employed, I collect unemployment but I collect ""too much"" per state guideline for free state health insurance, so what do I do? I need to get my life together or I need help cause if I dont I will most likely put myself out of my misery",0.532,2.9896492000000023,2.871666666666666,87.8325,90.33333333333334,6.333333333333334,24.16666666666667,7.645422480735847,1.5916666666666677,232,10,47,5,8,79,43,60,0.084,0.7490000000000001,0.16699999999999998,0.614,3,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,2,0,11,10,5,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,12,3,5,9,2,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,3,1,34,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646187028326933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018967747309773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345815757494402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5476180775302155,0.0,0.0,0.17265898488763085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18194537133040234,0.1258468020448084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18936030409328716,0.3820035079346644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25895185292328776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052680644284752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990850269825892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483102107057027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MutedCase7,2020/03/06,"My Friends With Kids Is Mentally Unstable And Talks About Being In Real Danger? Hi, new to reddit and also on a throw away account due to nature of my post.

Not sure if this is the best place for my post but it seems to be relative to a degree.

I have a friend Betty who lives in the USA. Betty is married and has two young children.

Lately, Betty has been worrying me with some of her bizarre ideas, I call them conspiracy theories.

I’ve tried to talk to Betty a bit about these things, did some in depth research and put forward some counter arguments and points regarding why things might not be that way but it seems no matter what I say or do she will flatly refuse to see any point of view that isn’t her own, it’s gotten to the point where she will say something then later deny that she has said it.

Some of the things that she has said have me worried, she’s mentioned that her husband and friends are part of some secretive group and being a part of this group they have access to special information.

She’s also mentioned that if she was to share this information with others then it would put her life and her children’s life in danger.

It seems to me like she may be involved in some sort of cult but I am not sure and obviously did not want to bring this up.

Her husband is a very tough guy, manipulative and controlling so I feel that this is having a big part in her change of behavior.

That said, her behavior is getting more and more bizzare, she’s getting very aggressive In general and started swearing during her conversations with me and more recently I’ve found it quite hard to contact her at all.

She mentioned that she is very scared about her situation and the way the world is going but is unable to leave this group as it will be very dangerous for her and her children to do so, when we talked about the future she said that she won’t be here anymore so it doesn’t matter.

I really worry about her and her kids, this is not a healthy situation for them to be in.

I am not sure what I can do to help or where I could start so if anyone could suggest some options that I can take with this then I would really appreciate that!

TLDR, My friend is mentally unstable and might be involved in a cult. She’s stated that she fears for her life. How can I help her?",5.665236939996767,5.6919334454148505,6.0203153808830665,82.11278909914282,67.16593886462883,9.230600032346755,29.40837781012453,8.94667605116694,2.1023646126475817,1810,57,372,28,27,582,194,458,0.151,0.769,0.08,-0.9856,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,1,0,3,3,16,18,4,2,16,0,54,3,0,3,5,77,73,38,0,8,15,2,2,1,4,9,3,6,0,6,38,23,0,2,9,0,1,6,10,7,0,1,10,10,56,11,53,43,17,46,0,0,2,0,78,23,0,20,15,281,94,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588810027940325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053525236809532466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805878750735337,0.05503559242660186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395027362157616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260088423809295,0.0,0.08593051323288202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037131648954865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326433543475747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827952528124172,0.1256864447598042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857019869237585,0.03979794596264735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630102948890854,0.24324341112328174,0.0,0.08224504973187279,0.0,0.04473248768538176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793489289092366,0.0,0.0,0.07050835429249858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551479071084466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885357400715252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878787330949489,0.08334211680036782,0.0,0.0,0.16678478495540178,0.038453541783617685,0.0,0.06950203147706094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15864155708399666,0.1669969248458782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760182359869434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25570452635821755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223479448348492,0.0,0.22321808020194325,0.0,0.15076410635513696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15824980427846566,0.0,0.08371736339389926,0.0,0.08958877283081276,0.10084678882451492,0.0,0.07771624854854729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994834701783277,0.12518608896965705,0.0788020549438138,0.0,0.06272137204990122,0.21496283026872895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17694580861253853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059450651218271,0.0,0.0,0.11142214027256266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22254864003740066,0.0,0.059179834440975576,0.18979141958471826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15687351100248298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053438661492745856,0.0,0.07688785624247109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597746998272487,0.04642496982541057,0.1249520564423924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102318443208593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23980030201172026,0.0,0.11182610345641823,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reallytirediam,2020/03/06,"Been having some not so welcomed thoughts So I’m typing this out late at night, can’t sleep and can’t get some shit out of my head. Where do I begin, I’ve been to many psychologist and psychiatrist through the years mostly for anxiety and feelings of emptiness, no matter how long I go or how many different types of medications I try to follow nothing works. I’ve always been a “good” kid always polite pretty sociable when I have to be and I was always pretty emotional, shit gets me feeling down real easy, anyway I’m kinda scared to say the stuff I’m about to say even on a throw away account so please try and understand that no matter how I feel I would never act on this, basically I’ve been having some thoughts about killing or harming people, whenever these thoughts pop into my head I just shake them away but I’m scared that it might be the begging to a bigger issue. The thoughts in the begging where about criminals yknow rapist murderers etc, but the past few months I’ve been having these thoughts about people who have mistreated me or used me in the past. I’m not a professional at this but I don’t think I’ve shown any signs of ASPD up until these thoughts started coming to me. The thing that scares me is that sometimes for a split second it feels like it’s the right thing to do. I’ve never told anyone about these thoughts because I don’t want anyone to perceive me as danger or a threat. I don’t know I could just be overreacting but I wanted to see what y’all think.",4.891610738255032,5.7723385973154375,5.26797986577181,83.83230536912751,69.06711409395972,7.9734228187919465,27.31610738255033,8.07648339933343,1.6000048322147649,1194,37,237,15,20,380,154,298,0.17800000000000002,0.752,0.07,-0.99,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,1,18,15,7,4,15,0,25,7,5,4,2,57,57,22,2,4,12,0,4,1,0,2,1,2,0,1,19,9,0,0,16,0,1,6,11,12,0,1,14,7,23,3,37,37,6,36,0,0,1,1,8,17,2,10,14,158,42,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275786631856629,0.0,0.0,0.061997754551859185,0.0,0.06974370724004089,0.0,0.0,0.12749436917102835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17131174699321633,0.0,0.0,0.055575514657144096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853365125944081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279068545219777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952517524051701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025523713684613,0.0,0.0,0.10167705593646216,0.060215981283486326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843902751324917,0.06513084530549007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526363095835952,0.0,0.051813199853390564,0.07646787185220652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871305118632033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515630173705816,0.0,0.0,0.1008645160124436,0.0,0.050103862331909985,0.0,0.10284211905893514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044540358665462514,0.0,0.0,0.08068131638618899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848612429475356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091842743815487,0.0,0.09671544653181396,0.0,0.0,0.07276988353614543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062964456684995,0.0,0.0,0.08555552791144805,0.0,0.08747870265979588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17406143382780362,0.12640961581100604,0.0,0.0,0.1000757134988598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18550242470511227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376979308530253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785746145764194,0.0,0.1450018137213693,0.2738269320306086,0.0,0.07264954741523141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871664559123067,0.0,0.0,0.09123441180507423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016804784729003,0.0,0.06452958376291494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436620185220796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211366950189526,0.1168342780828474,0.0,0.5066436319619262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711547648930258,0.0,0.12379495043045236,0.0,0.0,0.0949096975948888,0.0,0.07874037353904176,0.0,0.0,0.10754717048914317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637180546655476,0.0,0.0,0.06476353705124682,0.0,0.0,0.058709570615013175
mentalhealth,QasimTheDream,2020/03/06,Not cried in many years Please help,1.5828571428571436,4.33182442857143,-1.0599999999999987,115.13000000000002,90.42857142857142,2.8000000000000003,7.0,3.1291,-2.9746,29,0,7,0,1,7,7,7,0.0,0.358,0.642,0.7339,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5295124686715402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231098936536062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4887259733895147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5291493199173308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3104262590536182
mentalhealth,liamr_03,2020/03/07,"I’m Feeling Paranoid that my Mind Created a Memory I was on the way somewhere today and I remember bumping into someone I know but during the conversation I felt tired and hazy (probably due to my lack of sleep last night) so now I’m feeling paranoid that my mind made up the conversation. I’ll find out on Monday (when I see the person I bumped into) so I can find out if it was real or not. I definitely think it was real but asIve got a nagging thought telling me otherwise,  just a quick question: do false memories usually line up perfectly with the rest of a memory? Or are they usually separate events you remember? I’m only asking as I don’t want to strike up a conversation with the person I met on Monday about our conversation only to find out it wasn’t real.",4.364545454545453,5.591409934640523,6.416244800950687,73.83491978609626,70.56862745098039,10.008080808080807,30.90255496137849,10.230975488527342,3.389554248366013,612,26,113,17,11,215,88,153,0.128,0.792,0.08,-0.8021,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,1,1,1,7,2,1,0,11,0,8,2,1,1,1,37,23,11,0,3,7,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,9,0,0,12,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,9,4,17,1,20,14,2,24,0,0,1,0,13,11,0,4,12,77,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265422399602074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13688298955172926,0.0,0.12996571007083013,0.0,0.37114657278877705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825882675634244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438967656132739,0.11033551779189384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12807980386772772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733476766505724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702509852843955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20589298921222868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363802298700877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145939719501549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15163287512412854,0.0,0.0,0.462203969026269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30667035008902216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786346766532533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354565909606534,0.0,0.11468910284924698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183095892201162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673247683266863,0.0,0.1074597963949224,0.0,0.1555750703845218,0.12830434984023625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981572699457033,0.0,0.07983814875163851,0.10744154392116108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FrodoFeet,2020/03/07,"My story of how my new lifechanging hobby of sculpting clay is therapeutic for my ADHD, depression, and anxiety. Creativity and the mind is powerful. Stay strong! I thought this would be something to help inspire those who struggling with ADHD.

I live with ADHD, depression, anxiety, and always searched for a way to deal with it all. It's something that never really goes away, but finding a positive outlet to express myself has been a huge lifechanger. I recently learned that creating art with polymer clay is extremely therapeutic for my mental health. It gives me something to focus on and allows me to share my creativity with others. 

It's kind of scary because I've never made a video showing myself and talking about personal issues. So, even though this was very difficult to record (and it took me over 20 times to finally get right), I feel good about using video blogs to stay focused, inspire others, AND to share my polymer clay creations.

I may not be the most camera friendly or smooth with my words.....but hopefully a few people will still enjoy. 

Thank you for your support to raise awareness for ADHD! <3


[Follow my journey here.](https://youtu.be/xFcQifCH3SI)",6.349697315819531,8.873344980582527,5.976659051970304,73.79578241005144,67.64077669902912,8.536379211878929,33.476870359794404,9.168548406835145,3.4678667047401484,950,44,141,19,17,294,130,206,0.07200000000000001,0.664,0.264,0.9938,1,0,3,0,0,0,41.0,0,2,0,2,7,16,0,1,7,0,11,1,0,4,3,34,22,12,0,2,3,0,2,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,13,13,0,0,6,6,0,3,3,4,0,0,5,2,20,12,29,12,3,18,0,2,0,0,12,5,0,4,7,100,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5669728715426652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981370906990927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18045042783794815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11081027687629302,0.0,0.0,0.07189627418771789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215928975019736,0.2031663335567734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789949814317196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05963495732004982,0.0,0.0,0.12919956249591485,0.10779673987846444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911216024461085,0.0,0.0616197634313707,0.11314059644586197,0.0,0.09892405162874716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12536670120053284,0.0,0.0,0.0790539547767234,0.0,0.0,0.11714289692470115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310067846573343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281831664723795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414483915027613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159945676560222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188576728905769,0.0,0.11908767542245526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819280945408185,0.11390900080324873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176604800135558,0.10298229871929447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555658717988238,0.0,0.1164533760012852,0.0,0.0,0.10072171946677128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27239225962126445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25142069875890216,0.09418853619570372,0.0,0.0,0.12329845890853312,0.0,0.0,0.13383904558388313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947972140511064,0.0,0.1085850353557051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587729640139532,0.09363267696912284,0.06877285757868366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103776620428073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186391472091474,0.0,0.09731440129828896,0.0,0.09361677308658337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378252627849157,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spideyk3,2020/03/07,"I'm a mental and emotional mess I have no idea what to do with myself..... My life just feels very screwed up and I don't know why. I'll try my best to explain and hopefully there is someone who can offer help.  


I was diagnosed with Aspergers Syndrome (Autism) when I was 21 years old and struggled a bit trying to get my life on track since then. I was diagnosed so late because I didn't cause problems in school, but I still showed some signs which was caught by my mom's best friend. And after the diagnosis, we tried to get disability for myself but it was troublesome because I haven't gone to the doctor for anything like this before. We kept trying and at the same time I tried to find a job to work like anyone else, but still struggled to get hired at any work place. So back and forth through the years I have been denied disability and a job. They say I don't qualify for disability because the government believes I can work, but I can't work because of my Autism. I don't quite understand......  


And on top of that, I do have these mental/emotional breakdowns. It keeps me very depressed and have a short fuse when it does happen. I do have some friends to talk to about it, or to help me forget about it for a while...... But there are also people on the internet who take advantage of my pain. I even had former friends just abandon me after my breakdown and turn around and harass me for it even though I did apologize after I calmed down. It makes me very scared of meeting people now and even more scared of losing the friends I do have now because of my breakdowns..... I lost too many friends already....  


But that is my explanation. I apologize if it's hard to read..... This is my first post.",4.512466778480196,5.420128023738876,4.900608953683398,86.02476454651016,69.94955489614243,8.11606244355567,28.005289640046445,8.321376580360154,1.7195912527415822,1332,45,276,19,23,422,166,337,0.14800000000000002,0.6990000000000001,0.153,-0.0468,3,0,0,0,0,0,54.0,2,0,1,12,22,25,2,4,13,0,30,7,0,2,0,46,48,29,0,3,10,1,2,2,5,0,6,1,0,0,17,18,0,3,6,2,0,2,7,13,0,1,13,3,42,12,41,35,7,34,0,4,0,1,20,12,1,5,21,193,59,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931823309084524,0.06752713837151998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057422521499389576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059042849274893165,0.08651940041045356,0.0694874406650076,0.07517005988940557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06492962944183035,0.0,0.2573711103173976,0.0,0.07185275366399614,0.09513566994346563,0.1772304555291855,0.0,0.09218729402594587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674378348576528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07272858772917347,0.1714109165350158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642855910826742,0.07389456113997997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053930811731253,0.18996867845570256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673167119447301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04269571783126922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717720269809354,0.07182515362295053,0.0,0.0,0.32619309220701964,0.0,0.13235022630313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467056699745997,0.0,0.07564221536571551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319754379896585,0.0,0.0,0.08386859482756677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532318898241017,0.0,0.0,0.16758858446766242,0.0750547084978329,0.0,0.0,0.046406359919857434,0.0,0.09525270447923656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11928582317101175,0.08250684953174149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446746179171878,0.09217691848766972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0563647737699692,0.08560954162202325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17019258139424212,0.0,0.0,0.0988958410092717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860623289499174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985077992590099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708099646682114,0.0,0.08822248224756699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087077848268684,0.0,0.0,0.08079827544569053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981300010805843,0.08446347716642784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715057525914962,0.16907959549284446,0.08545842191961425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06985015868861105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154626867237357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13486878653302922,0.0,0.0,0.17655135333916505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348884223735059,0.0678701768929695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296248664440542,0.0,0.049238008268722766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866482122615578,0.09184715371483998,0.0,0.08790566997203661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20901708018932674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761945313669354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458951266158237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087539897284692
mentalhealth,wethinkwealone,2020/03/07,"Been fighting depression for most of the 17 years I’ve been alive I have a lot of questions I’ve always wanted answered about my depression. I doubt that I’m special and many people feel the same things I do but sometimes I wonder. I will try and keep this short. Maybe I’ll go into greater detail in a future post but for now I have only have a few questions.

Does anyone find great comfort with their depression? I feel like every time I’m in a situation where I feel some happiness it’s almost alien to me. I don’t feel comfortable with it and my brain automatically pushes it away. Depression feels like home and when I leave it for even a short period of time I get home sick.

Do genetics play any role in any of it? My Dad struggles with depression along with what I’m pretty sure is bipolar disorder. I find a lot of my habits and mental issues to be very similar to what he deals with. If you were to compare us side by side it would be almost identical and this worries me. Because of his mental illnesses he has turned to alcoholism. Since a teenager he has been drinking heavily which lead to my parents divorce and many other things I have seen which still stick with me to this day.

Last question. Does medication really work? When I was going to counseling medication was always recommended. I was prescribed prozac and a couple other things I can’t remember. I tried them for a short period of time but never stuck with it. I’ve always leaned towards the idea of being able to fight this on my own with out medication. I just want to know if it is possible to do so or if medication would be a better route.

Any help would be greatly appreciated!",3.5758791208791223,5.621838261538464,4.839554945054947,81.03898076923079,74.07692307692308,8.08901098901099,25.76098901098901,8.841846274778883,2.0430989010989014,1325,46,251,28,28,438,174,325,0.132,0.701,0.16699999999999998,0.917,1,0,2,0,4,0,22.0,1,1,2,3,10,20,2,2,13,0,29,11,1,1,2,59,48,18,0,8,8,2,5,2,0,4,9,0,2,0,22,19,2,1,15,2,0,4,3,9,0,0,9,6,32,11,42,30,8,33,0,5,1,0,19,14,0,15,16,170,54,2,0.08103582559150764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08660265298906951,0.16229134745828105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20228489561032156,0.0,0.0,0.1653214207172729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05666213343037601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761358256794781,0.0,0.0,0.049398687133243184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166960242917232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904627815167105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966459969096686,0.0,0.05226140357993631,0.08354437791368333,0.3489801891950355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287407674255097,0.0,0.1418299941318406,0.0,0.0,0.07938425841866828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0535233985361176,0.0,0.06827617810734414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20487074136594827,0.11578401998859325,0.0,0.0,0.14813055300575062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04233787424120426,0.0,0.09210905430997476,0.0,0.0,0.1786845675924654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08626414319721384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0543166057320956,0.0,0.16257108065127412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147958337822017,0.0,0.08458034814907774,0.0,0.07202836515700793,0.0,0.0,0.04453517047516798,0.06605501356464348,0.0,0.08580523865188458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918002221270601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13778752209870682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16431521614805025,0.08141137876192962,0.0,0.0,0.3265402755288125,0.16333010473329887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062499824396354035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616313969764954,0.0,0.0,0.08998069437597073,0.0,0.0,0.05618003810315274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135571749789094,0.07760992054549988,0.08244256753174202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723360117472364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05191362491482528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179779340507424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703367233041076,0.09108766323285032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014650359069607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471531499562129,0.0,0.0,0.08471623967232172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637530660039278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150980520412805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417579247257648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003601249067617,0.08814370822045557,0.0,0.0,0.0974761205085454,0.0,0.0,0.06686304287120165,0.09559405899943048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787989609710457,0.05899504616264228,0.0822958144607579,0.0,0.1726965764063594,0.0,0.0,0.05218441481702541
mentalhealth,this-is-an-alt22,2020/03/07,"I had a traumatic experience and not I constantly worry about everything where you COULD die I was in a bus that crashed and tipped over, I was  perfectly unharmed but ever since then I have been constantly worrying about how ‘that rock could fall on me’ etc. There was this one night I was staying at an air bnb and it was right on the main road and I was so worried that a car was gonna crash into the house and the house was gonna collapse and I was gonna die I got virtually no sleep.
Should I seek professional help?",4.448221024258757,5.099079509433967,5.23269541778976,84.51783018867927,69.9433962264151,9.453369272237195,28.350404312668466,9.606745405546679,2.236414016172507,412,14,90,9,7,134,68,106,0.242,0.69,0.069,-0.9676,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,7,1,0,0,7,0,15,1,1,1,2,15,19,10,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,12,0,12,1,8,1,2,18,0,0,0,0,2,10,0,0,5,65,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36049692968273855,0.0,0.2663479058987981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462182184653349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860229145967877,0.0,0.1508775727179143,0.0,0.0,0.14990652449565225,0.16315961988938332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340291914851427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180061462034152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.384923036099376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15652782739795132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302606650249325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424438558931938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797632723522835,0.0,0.1669176102631165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17778357027748218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5081718111828348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yykiht6,2020/03/07,"I'm so alone I'm 19 and have 0 friends, the only people I talk to are my parents but even then our relationship isnt that deep. I have nobody I can be myself with, I struggle with conversation and find it really hard to keep friends. I'm just afraid to talk and dont know how to unless I'm really familiar with someone, which is super hard when I dont let myself get close to anyone. After breaking up with my ex lobelyness really hit me hard, I felt lonely with him but atleast I had 1 person to talk to. Now we've broken up I have absolutely nobody. It's not normal for a 19 to feel like this. I hate being so isolated yet I can only blame myself for it.",1.7294047619047603,3.292595321428572,4.300000000000002,85.01333333333334,77.92857142857143,7.238095238095237,20.952380952380953,8.07648339933343,0.9546666666666668,515,13,110,9,12,182,85,140,0.205,0.696,0.099,-0.9309,1,3,0,0,1,0,11.0,1,0,0,1,8,8,1,2,2,0,14,0,0,1,0,21,25,11,0,1,5,2,5,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,6,9,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,5,18,4,19,19,0,10,0,1,0,0,12,4,0,0,6,74,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16082895913788867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857924080547546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639869279439959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256461637685248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851702085345204,0.11093600105275828,0.1490984438794522,0.0,0.14192814505672335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23994640328368694,0.0,0.08113027103146878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4173159536567024,0.15331229459002935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13802489831798026,0.0,0.0,0.08534085652242401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878995729666665,0.0,0.07586465756165271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152146831870199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362032591558329,0.0,0.0,0.17242618466700366,0.0,0.0,0.10765542199639212,0.13558931974553004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29843962657908724,0.0,0.0,0.1667185262868227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13157291069647406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16233813361118887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37443783815691983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TinyWriting1,2020/03/07,"Has anybody else had no genuine friendships as a child? Will the feeling ever go away? I was bullied since I was 3. When I was 4, a girl I tried to be friends with told me she hated me. By the time I was around 7, I believed that the concept of a friendship where your friends “have your back” and want to spend time with you was a ideal fantasy created by the media, because I was often warned that media portrayals of romantic relationships weren’t always realistic. So I thought that since other children always preferred to insult and exclude me and never showed interest in treating me in a positive way, friendships as seen in books and television must’ve been made up like magic and superpowers. My parents encouraged this idea and told me I expected too much from other children and that if nobody wanted to be nice to me, it’s because something is wrong with me and I must be a bad person. I’ve had psychiatrists who were abusive as well.

I struck it lucky when I was 14 and got a really amazing friend, I can’t believe how unbelievably fortunate I was. It’s been hard to learn how to be social and talk to another person so late in life, but he’s been exceedingly patient and supportive. A lot of people haven’t had this luck and never got the opportunity to live. My friend lives very far away in another country, but he is wonderful.

I’m 16 now (I am aware that I’m technically still a child). I still have severe depression. Sometimes it feels like I can’t remember that I have a friend, as though my mind is stuck years in the past. Sometimes I find myself struggling with really simple social things that are expected, because I just don’t have the experience to recognize certain mistakes and it makes me feel stupid. I miss my friend because he lives so far away and I have no chance of meeting up for years. Being at school and being surrounded by people who get to be with their friends makes me feel envious and miserable. It frustrates me that most children have always had friends. 

Has anyone experienced a deprivation of friendship in their childhood? It feels like there are no people who have experienced this and gotten better. I see a small amount of people who never had friends but are adults and still never recovered from the isolation and angst, and this terrifies me. I hear about people who were bullied or lonely for periods of their life (usually in adulthood) but never of someone who didn’t make any friends until past 10 years old and managed to live a full life today. 

It feels like there are so few people who were friendless as a kid, and it feels like there are none who actually recovered from it. Can anyone give me some hope?",6.854023668639054,7.208788672583829,6.990349112426037,75.04599704142012,64.64102564102564,10.07360946745562,34.059763313609466,9.888512548439397,3.3090231952662723,2135,87,383,42,30,687,234,507,0.156,0.6579999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.9364,4,4,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,3,3,3,25,43,5,2,22,0,53,3,0,6,8,77,86,43,0,10,7,1,8,5,10,2,3,1,0,10,33,28,0,0,14,3,1,1,15,14,1,0,30,13,48,29,55,47,8,50,0,5,2,0,50,21,0,10,32,277,81,4,0.0,0.07481899757286667,0.061622468727106375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15763035841656,0.0,0.0,0.04294219912461085,0.13243049812890936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830785288569397,0.0,0.0,0.056214314448279526,0.0,0.0,0.17798636107733942,0.04855622852799862,0.05272519786488181,0.1539755647029796,0.0,0.0,0.14229033403240518,0.0,0.055848485792264715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05438851194214968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05275130621559545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05712017479595869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06176998900392031,0.0,0.0,0.2235035275886719,0.1804492274585908,0.0,0.0,0.05771531307933276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4878729931347682,0.0,0.03299175784282208,0.060576460412602125,0.035887956934415016,0.0,0.1010090223853333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0565674057781629,0.06234469616747292,0.0,0.0,0.07117138056878425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271932693559902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128539910110153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123268877958573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13380801045301952,0.15425243742448735,0.0,0.22304021453456827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368541340720995,0.0,0.05975132080962842,0.12645355562465452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376057827580077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04642039047989722,0.0,0.24351471450314904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626226778806339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011739093154266,0.0,0.12056212044093573,0.2626695240493509,0.11027523873012547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090730924162215,0.0,0.0,0.06779636228546007,0.07153336403409077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06390824497294315,0.05032006971814063,0.0,0.0,0.07133825839216491,0.0,0.10447188123997267,0.0,0.0,0.12874104943982334,0.05350434003467845,0.04861372914169472,0.12490820976740208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512880870371795,0.0,0.0,0.0660150684160617,0.0,0.0,0.07165859029523503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05075525376905367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041952132915151874,0.0,0.06204171339628125,0.05013175047614379,0.07364317345755028,0.0,0.059856075173975565,0.12067953638900952,0.0,0.042872741524526685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954761855603381,0.052102977737461635,0.07449160124936755,0.05012323539896262,0.0,0.0,0.05677683412237473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848034539406228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904145004589005,0.0,0.12199400236801128
mentalhealth,Big_lier,2020/03/07,"i'm bad person :) I trying to fix myself, for example stop lie, so i trying first time to tell story about my real life and not lie (at least anonimus).

I from east europe. My family not rich, but i always had home, food and i think even love. I will tell things i thing inportant for me.

My father then i was kid punish me around 0-3 times per week. I think i was good kid who was very active and who make a lot stupy mistakes. Thats why then i was kid i lied always a lot. First time then i felt lie is good was in 2 school year. Somethink happen and i with teacher go out of class. Don't remember if she cry before or after, but i told how it's hard for me, becouse ""father lost finger"" (it was lie). My feeling mixed about this event. I have problems with bullying me, but it wasn't hard for me. I had friends, my best friend and i was good student (avarge my result was \~8,6 till 9 school year)

Secound big lie witch i remember was with my best friends friend, i liked her so i told a lot fake story about myself and everyone. I think i remember this becouse it didn't worked. it was in 9-10 class

My life started fuck up in 8 school years. My parents started divorce in hard way: 2 years process, 18 police calls, runing from our home to live in ""help centre"" and so on. We started have money problems, but everythink worked in good way. I remember this moments then we all worked togever. After 6 months ""family protection"" blocked my father from living in our home and after 6 months everythink was almost ok.

I was studying in art school. Also my mom was teacher in same school. With new school year, i organized class party in forest and from this moment i started drink, first time didn't comeback home becouse i found nice girl in concert :) Becouse our school had many room to practice, we drinked in school, miss lessons and so on. It was fun moments.

I started missing about 80+ lessons per semester. In 10 school year i lost best friend. He didn't wanted share music cd, so i stolen for a day and copy it. He saw it, after he few friends teached me ""lesson"", i told about it for director. All class started protect him and at this moment i thinked my life is ending, but in same week my happen even bigger disaster. My granny die. I didn't come to school about 2-3 months.

I not remeber much, but then i comeback to school, my goal was to stay repeat school year, becouse my music teacher told me i will never get in university, so i wanted get more time. For me teacher was like a father and i think it was biggest mistake in my life :( So i convinced my mom, i want move to other school where my music teacher learning and i did everythink to fuck up my school, becouse i wanted to reapeat year. But becouse my mom was school teacher, she fixed it.

After i moved to new art school i lied about my class and they taked me in same school year.. They didn't check my papers, just trusted my word (i not joking). This school was worse, but had much strong music students from my instrument.

After i started study, most people was from my perspective losers. Everythink was easy for me. Everyone was drinking and smoking so i join them. In winter i found love in internet 300km away and i started autostop a lot and miss lessons. I missed in first simester around 50+ lessons, in secound \~150, gf left me and after a lot drama i was expelled from school.

I had grandpa in my girlfriends town, i got idea to move here. I worked hard and got to good art school. The idea was to show how good i'm for my ex-gf. For my family this big city was last place where i could continue my studies so they supported my again. With first school papers i got to 11 year school.

Started my golden year. Before semester i found way how to make money on the street, started party nonstop, got a lot friends and so on. In new school i come like rock star. I had amazing music group and had many activities non stop. I found 2nd GF in my class for 3-4 weeks after i left her becouse i didn't started it and i started to be boring with her. After i left her, i had problems with class again school again.. but before i also was missing lessons, just now started even more. I think first semester i missed \~80, and secound \~140. Again a lot drama in family..

After i fuck up, i comeback to my home town and i was trying to finish last 2 years in adult school. I didn't told about it for anyone. In this adult school nobody care if you are in lessons or not, just tell them u are working and you not need to go. So i lied and i always was drinking, parting and autostoping every week from 700-1200 km to play with my band, meet friends and so on.

My look i think was 4-5 max, but i found gf who i think was 10 (now she is profesional pole dancer). We were able to be togever 3+ years. I lied to her a lot about my past. For example i told, i before was drug dealer and so on.. I told many good real stories, but it was not enouth for me. I was hiding fact, i was studing in adult school for a year i think. After i told, but don't know why. She supported me.

After i finish studie i with my family moved to other country. After few months GF left me and it was hard time for me. I was not going to language lessons, but i didn't wanted learn stupy language with idiots who can't read so i was played everyday 11-16 hours in small music school. My family thinked everythink is ok, until they got info about me from school. After this i started learn in curses for working in shop, but at the same time, i registrated to university and i manige get in. In university exam i lied to profesors how i had punk green haircloth (actualy i had only long her and only 1 times i painted them...)

And i thinked again i'm superman, relaxed and started play computer games. In summer i got weight from 95kg to 115kg. University was not in english, it was language witch i know only basic things. First lessons was easy for me, but i didn't feel in right place. After main music teacher pressure i didn't come back. I stay at home and played games until I was expelled from university. I still didn't told for anyone about it.

Now i'm 160kg and 30 years old. I never worked in my life, living on minimum money whitch i get from my mom. She thinks i finished university, working, just can't surivive without help. I know this gona finish, but i wish to live like this more.

I had idea about killing myself but i don't want to die. I know i will always find they how to be piece of shit and keep my lies safe forever, but i wish to change.

My plan is:

1. Stop lie and learn to say things who I really am and can be proud of myself.
2. Start doing sports, becouse now i can't normal move..
3. Find fucking job.

But it's almost inposible and i trying to find way to do it.

I feel bad about many things, but i think i'm not bad person.  
I not feel bad about lies, i feel bad about not being good in some situation. I can't delete them or accept it.  
I don't know how to work. For now everythink i have is my moms money..  
Shit live i have now is ok for me, it's hard to imagine somethink better..  
I hate school.  
I love music, but i can't listen it anymore without hating everythink about it.  
Now i writing from 20 square room with 4 month trash and beetles.

So ye, my life and i suck :) But maybe some good advice will come also i want to see people reaction to my life.",1.32142834987593,3.5458477815860228,2.745188172043012,92.36999379652607,82.27284946236558,5.455169561621175,21.164805624483048,6.701396960909476,0.3751264681555009,5681,173,1204,61,156,1843,436,1488,0.134,0.713,0.153,0.9897,2,0,7,0,1,2,227.0,7,3,9,36,66,87,12,1,14,3,102,24,3,9,5,223,219,102,3,19,45,11,14,4,13,4,8,3,8,9,47,65,6,8,55,25,7,12,37,36,0,7,90,22,232,51,180,119,31,218,0,9,5,7,100,78,7,18,126,750,279,63,0.02123690786499996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020752460578942863,0.0,0.0,0.04253139112362424,0.0,0.0,0.05094944264087097,0.07068323438759386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021061306074706763,0.029698679523821263,0.0,0.0,0.037810700971560585,0.0,0.0,0.019952774015425355,0.01632987127209469,0.08865965500520416,0.0,0.0,0.072284177683766,0.0,0.06686047377366759,0.01878231920758041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021685257358808597,0.0,0.021652442934082045,0.0,0.02246583260767764,0.07317486272545673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.016955942867281876,0.0,0.023327746081333808,0.013696048687372146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044081114977047205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321633892974277,0.02462807085138324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018809596920181238,0.0,0.0,0.042080332064352674,0.0,0.017893010816588124,0.040585551105400484,0.0,0.0,0.12012160019234085,0.0,0.05369009357114312,0.0,0.0203907619422819,0.0,0.05823044714875395,0.12644872086762687,0.02567975328790371,0.11642586662372717,0.1312606586885702,0.0785327164568728,0.04438163135365829,0.0,0.03620827243323984,0.16031259665003586,0.1019105714885685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03755945497810838,0.0,0.11414458855935618,0.041934099652144105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028469303374208575,0.0,0.12781410084133454,0.0,0.0209140763977028,0.0,0.0,0.07192165204282579,0.0,0.0,0.02107435414737174,0.018876339487386616,0.023495492042950584,0.0,0.0583562458474123,0.03462182872461947,0.0,0.0,0.09229585013470497,0.0,0.10500179252520717,0.04150112186075165,0.0,0.09376289361491746,0.018793995174007646,0.01783365395467985,0.0,0.04636518723737782,0.14443887702248767,0.057501415477210514,0.0,0.028351601814359282,0.0861235652424671,0.021335328384818743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436204910685418,0.08475548622961783,0.11285736081399472,0.031223141661424106,0.015746898090015,0.03275842511865877,0.061532213854698176,0.0,0.0,0.02080766068521771,0.0,0.0,0.02228456237189437,0.0,0.0,0.0484548762091554,0.0,0.0,0.023581072965479483,0.022997501696231257,0.020273031563355696,0.029445995875036164,0.037086497603991006,0.04437609734699316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060962558159249884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02124265487387316,0.04834450100238551,0.013604906980423841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622910689309573,0.018136203280216787,0.0,0.016888441521315238,0.0,0.6447865363133898,0.016923066016674756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04359876148171215,0.0,0.02387117423181913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405054830817901,0.04527143624717318,0.0169598220538212,0.05326501770277818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04819878275291552,0.0,0.0,0.015967511748686138,0.0,0.055685980585843786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054428966813271,0.17690078966477102,0.0,0.0,0.09906729407016444,0.0,0.0,0.18263497997430214,0.0,0.05767386565236321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017522673097539968,0.08768254941660762,0.06742747586616951,0.06813986599507106,0.0258608325232807,0.0,0.0,0.038326012316898916,0.0,0.048842791942775785,0.04094324268207103,0.0,0.13914649670464718,0.0,0.02164222343423188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20513808578527912
mentalhealth,Uhtcear,2020/03/07,"What are mental health hospitals in the UK like for a 17 year old? Hi, so there’s a chance that I may be sectioned and put into a mental health hospital for depression and anxiety. However, I’m terrified as to what this actually entails. I’ve visited family in hospital before and have been told the basics of how it works by said family. But as a 17 year old I’m petrified as to whether it’s actually ‘worth it’ I guess if that’s how you’d phrase it. I’m really struggling and people, including myself, scared for my safety hence the hospital. 

So just wondered if anyone could express their experience, let me know what is and isn’t allowed in hospitals (such as personal items - eg. teddy, phones to contact family, books), and or how the system works inside??
Many thanks",3.0116441441441464,5.5541923716216255,5.001243243243241,76.77979279279279,77.98648648648648,9.352072072072074,26.082882882882885,9.725611199111238,3.0845039639639644,613,24,109,20,15,210,96,148,0.127,0.804,0.069,-0.8737,2,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,1,2,8,5,0,2,8,0,10,2,0,4,0,22,19,20,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,10,7,0,0,2,1,1,2,1,3,0,0,3,1,7,2,16,11,2,12,0,1,0,0,10,5,0,6,5,71,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.2905068523305522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386772444369685,0.0,0.0,0.10407744491502242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665803062179146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884240229174554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12820190211161053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560115364323492,0.4209597674905009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16397200633544473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164352926785473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180254556785878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15220637859506184,0.0,0.07271923859290585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15090772992480328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000059995840497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.312380260658511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319192848940947,0.12996766096534665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963257922198794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953553477482609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415878025298528,0.0,0.14902204502555855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560744423324466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703853221890036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14222990810517516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614184728222931,0.21672511412921786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19170547346987174
mentalhealth,crystallinemist,2020/03/07,"Scared Alright so let me start at the beginning:

Growing up I was raised by two bipolar guardians, my mom and grandma. Throughout the years I had to deal with the emotional backlashes from them up until my early teen years.

It wasn’t until around 2013 I noticed my mental health started to deteriorate. I am fairly certain I have some form of psychotic disorder, but I am afraid to get help.

I currently take Sertraline to help lessen anxiety and depression. I mostly don’t want to be an inpatient, seeing as how I don’t function well being locked up or isolated.

I’m really scared shitless.

tl:dr I’m scared to get mental help due to being locked up in a psychiatric ward.",4.221697443181817,6.416224195312503,5.357556818181821,77.37721590909092,72.671875,9.029545454545453,30.38636363636364,9.573946990214177,3.217475000000001,539,24,94,14,11,178,88,128,0.162,0.691,0.147,-0.7166,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,4,8,0,4,5,1,12,2,0,1,1,11,22,9,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,5,1,1,3,1,14,3,21,15,3,18,0,1,1,0,6,7,0,3,10,64,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271337352487055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14794298460942756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17133302951236348,0.14313789760062404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19046640035916507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869396759454114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736532472443225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766505869827628,0.0,0.0,0.3341779128162372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699389843259486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3349578074953189,0.0,0.0,0.19463794369589368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18920669032530726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646459823801907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4991509923745238,0.0,0.13243070511347388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352581284383925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495305742485563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234200056645434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980222735554866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14942340539377658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21403986976043887
mentalhealth,elyd3m,2020/03/07,"It’s been 2 months to the day since I was admitted to the hospital for suicidal ideation. I went from hardly being able to function to actually caring about life. I’m about to start a new job, I’m more active at home, and I’m finally at a point where I feel peace of mind. It’s been a whirlwind since being diagnosed bipolar depressive, but with the right help and support, I’ve learned things will get better. To anyone out there that feels like they’re suffocating and don’t know what to do, know that there is light at the end of the tunnel. Please find the right help so that life is worth living again.",4.841967213114753,5.5374729918032815,5.155860655737708,85.25952868852461,69.08196721311475,8.722950819672132,26.72540983606557,8.841846274778883,1.7248819672131144,483,14,101,8,8,153,81,122,0.035,0.728,0.237,0.9751,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,9,0,10,4,0,0,0,14,23,5,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,4,0,1,0,7,5,0,0,7,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,4,4,3,4,18,16,1,16,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,0,8,57,10,2,0.17020801136304178,0.0,0.16609846628951147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190133990784236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15053515424328134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17353841135392895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977008637170617,0.0,0.14659991077874565,0.17275754868299512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15075377765332926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17212456944734073,0.1215966373269258,0.0,0.1864545567463446,0.1555670388077019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892666086059013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524729459207193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22817368437150234,0.0,0.17073251331010006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16890518775081678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18708374344215445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404459041492553,0.08315503681323963,0.0,0.1502967923888912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17186157062682408,0.0,0.13585841079083052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16438795800767744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868372839700952,0.16090158682930547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907134234065276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815956517611312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047410649858765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18617993855304305,0.1931500342385895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307863963774152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15778453177463544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uuuh27839,2020/03/07,"I obsessively beat myself up over anything I do wrong and I can’t stop So for the past 10 years or so I’ve had really bad depression where I’ve acted out very manic got myself into debt didn’t care about anything just wanted to either die or be reckless. 

I’ve never had any structure in my life until 3 years ago. I got a job I love, Met someone, got out of debt and am functioning normally. 

Now, instead of my depression I obsessively put myself down whenever I do ANYTHING wrong. For example, if I speak to someone in a rude tone (even if was an accident) my inner voice for the next week will be like ‘you’re a piece of shit, you deserve to die’ etc etc or if something goes wrong I’ll be in a downer of a mood for weeks. I’m constantly scared that my life will go to shit again and have this overwhelming need to be perfect 

Why am I like this????",2.652021103896104,4.062144835227276,4.398084415584417,85.92159090909092,75.07954545454545,7.755844155844157,25.07142857142857,8.418075326091056,1.5477951298701298,665,22,141,12,14,225,105,176,0.26,0.659,0.081,-0.9868,3,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,2,9,19,3,4,8,0,16,5,2,0,2,20,26,12,2,6,8,0,0,2,0,2,2,2,0,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,2,3,3,13,0,0,8,2,17,5,24,12,4,27,0,3,0,1,4,11,2,6,15,90,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094898948273054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399543265137698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049305824661276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313109008318257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12593326934470422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347742005330118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127691028858944,0.0,0.2563811825907812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755070200794969,0.08158146108667377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019725424244888,0.0,0.29636220465777946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12257103390995094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744866659422347,0.12068781276340078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147843325021237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915858946979157,0.0952635133674184,0.0,0.13136116318517888,0.0,0.1210199119555294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791044327303747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12416816411915615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912781113850778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366153039876734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535757553772184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093102021579307,0.0950890102345336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326529653698524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191402039712873,0.07285321203133867,0.0,0.19815491775208155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145439908804224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4051375979130541,0.0,0.1590811093153282
mentalhealth,seanhubbard,2020/03/07,"Help me please So this kid I know (about 16, I'm 15) told me about this app, and he said I should try it for help with my problems. So.. Story so far.. I have been depressed alot for the past 3 years, self harm and all that, but I've had the sudden urge to harm others, and when I do, it feels like.. Like a rollercoaster ride, I used to use mdma to ease the pain, but now harming others feels the right thing to do, they all deserve it don't they, making fun of me, telling me to blow my brains out, I feel like I should blow theirs out.. Just a thought but I always act first then think, so many people I'd love to hurt, my brother, the school pupils... Its all feels so surreal, I really want to harm people, it just feels... Right? I don't know, I'll keep you updated on what I plan to do.",1.2512499999999989,2.5580616250000037,2.4352380952380948,98.97642857142858,78.58333333333334,5.7523809523809515,17.952380952380953,6.1826913282559595,-0.5555047619047621,595,10,150,4,14,190,99,168,0.177,0.6990000000000001,0.124,-0.9196,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,3,2,11,13,0,0,8,0,10,3,1,3,3,32,28,13,0,4,5,1,5,3,0,2,1,1,0,2,12,6,0,1,9,0,0,2,2,8,0,1,5,6,22,5,17,21,4,16,0,2,0,1,14,6,0,1,11,89,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299293174579978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17431505336602762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13449177503343052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3947706848671914,0.22310719706884768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282111896316384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093281207609725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16716181556130089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879330378418944,0.0,0.0,0.17163192393349114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22886102272316566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409314807686847,0.0,0.10423134437739276,0.1583116016966978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16615462031755146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14906285354104146,0.21650951199742946,0.0,0.0,0.17140582030426674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941447130523644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003369502605994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667025111563555,0.1485344177557111,0.0,0.0,0.15803214684057998,0.0,0.0,0.16289851575948655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648199156296506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10373912836958148,0.10005462151751453,0.0,0.12396566602596255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492080264710388,0.0,0.1060156070148802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697269466418064,0.0,0.0,0.0921013217622697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055548703224844
mentalhealth,doug678910,2020/03/07,"Help: depression relapse Apologies if this is not the right subreddit. I would've posted in r/depression, but it didn't seem like the right place to seek help.

Also, I am not seeking for professional help here. I am going to see my doctor next week and my therapist the week after. 

However, that feels like an eternity away, so what I am seeking is help with pulling myself together until then. My depression is back. I've spent the last few days crying for hours, staring at the ceiling and laying in bed, thinking about how shitty everything is. I've mustered up the strength to write this post, of which I am proud of, but I need a plan to keep me going. To stop the negative thoughts racing and the tension/anxiety I feel. I've called my parents and told them how it is, and my dad is coming for a visit tomorrow. But that's 2 hours of distraction. I need ideas for the rest of the day. I've tried to force myself to do stuff I normally enjoy, but I just can't. I watched netflix but just stared through the screen. I'd love to go for a run, but I tried earlier and because I started crying after 200m I went back home, because I don't want people to see.

So.. what do I do, guys? Meditation? Cold shower? Heck, a certain tea brand that I don't know yet which calms the mind? Any ideas are welcome.",2.8545768025078364,4.616392578544065,4.091990595611287,86.85547805642634,75.32183908045977,7.3508185301288735,26.42302333681644,8.150884317080207,1.6513203065134094,1017,38,208,17,22,333,147,261,0.136,0.7170000000000001,0.147,0.6245,3,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,1,3,12,12,0,1,17,0,18,3,0,2,1,38,39,20,0,5,11,2,2,2,0,0,1,0,3,1,12,8,1,2,8,1,1,8,7,3,0,0,5,9,26,9,29,34,2,37,0,2,6,1,15,8,1,2,21,132,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977051108221984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633744338859845,0.0,0.08587498598347135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546753573919863,0.1726347705511709,0.0,0.13685955998239413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462519716485195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966979885070324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24661431955736765,0.14479074471594802,0.0,0.290055938168834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489804114846533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088781214767037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351929026365495,0.08019519823416431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19139179664717687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115038117865612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009694059350496,0.0,0.11260120387300128,0.0,0.22109768779236372,0.0,0.0,0.2534451066431404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997776553762444,0.0,0.0,0.06169256906091625,0.09150304001707443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109684524309297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131477770474022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334583774876365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16647174330809675,0.0,0.0,0.11938476940441885,0.0,0.1099863455212162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464620978680188,0.0,0.0,0.07782368055503854,0.0,0.11728288079872752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21501906614392116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19173080055443698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890585725580013,0.10219299570584088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945486869642794,0.0,0.0,0.09385044495356516,0.0,0.0,0.1285054448046465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033703828619406,0.0,0.07192865413808502,0.0,0.08911815747579391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726473568022936,0.0,0.15242794015022296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621107569268178,0.0,0.18008883743542367,0.0,0.0,0.10406177409274243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974293390189717,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wagpoolxo,2020/03/07,"something is different with how I’ve been behaving/thinking I’ve never posted here before but I’ve been getting really weird things I’ve been doing and. I don’t know why I’m doing it

So a couple of weeks ago I was waiting at my boyfriends house and thought I saw something - I’m a big believer in ghosts and stuff so chalked it down to a spirit or something - then I heard someone call my name. Got freaked out, also chalked it down to ghosts.

I checked with friends and none of them (sans one) have ever felt anything in his house, so I was a little paranoid but I thought whatever.

I was working at my job and I thought my manager was behind me on the phone. I’m 80% sure he was actually there, but I turned around a minute later and he was gone. It’s possible he just walked past and I didn’t notice. Freaked me out though, I spent the rest of the shift worried that something was wrong with me.

I go to school and I check my locker. Some year 12s are putting shit in my locker. Danny Devito memes for gods sake. So I go ‘what the fuck’, to which a girl next to me says ‘oh the year 12s are doing it, they’re everywhere - just know you’re being watched’ and of course I went ‘what’ and she went ‘nothing’. Scared the shit out of me and I couldn’t focus for ages. 

I’ve told people about this and they think it’s funny, and they don’t understand how scared I am about this. Another meme appears in my locker. Freaks me out again. I leave it alone.

Yesterday, I went round to my boyfriends. Completely sober. We were lying in bed after I accidentally broke his glasses (which in itself sent me into a depressive episode,,, whole other topic). I suddenly started getting really confused. I’d say something and then half a second later I’d say ‘wait did I just say XYZ’ or ‘why did I say that’ or ‘i don’t remember what just happened’. When reminded I remember but just thinking back I can’t always.

It lasted for what seemed like 20 minutes and it was really freaking me out. My boyfriend just kept assuring me that I was just tired. I have been exhausting. The thing is, I remember that it’s happen before. I don’t remember when or where but I remember that feeling.

For context, I have depression/anxiety/ocd(triple threat lol) and have had for years. I have tried substances and have been drunk etc. I’m thinking that’s probably related - never got these symptoms before trying substances. 

I’m sorry that this is so long I’m just really freaking out and no one believes me. I’ve spoken to my therapist about the locker and ghost thing and I mean to talk to her about the confusion thing at my next appointment. 

Just really looking for advice and support between now and my next sessions. Any help’s appreciated.",1.9715948770230651,4.503618018796995,3.164580094303556,88.434300369568,82.15789473684211,6.3887345482349955,24.43048298712884,7.653070788468383,1.4021075825156113,2134,82,419,37,59,687,247,532,0.16899999999999998,0.777,0.054000000000000006,-0.996,2,1,5,0,0,0,62.0,1,0,3,1,32,23,4,4,17,1,41,7,2,2,5,86,86,44,3,1,18,0,3,1,1,0,3,6,1,1,34,34,1,3,18,1,3,10,11,18,0,4,35,12,64,5,50,49,5,62,1,2,4,1,26,23,3,9,29,278,98,7,0.0,0.0,0.06696294446677206,0.0,0.0,0.06705439246448214,0.060827238106051514,0.0,0.0,0.07106933132629019,0.0,0.05487516222781672,0.05709710086251054,0.0,0.0,0.04666376006447626,0.07195375546527161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056468179627411776,0.061086095614049624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052764326090785366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751709731338222,0.15462184383046562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006840235158865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194646685726726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592641077187585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591020609859224,0.0,0.0,0.07169299843331932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652912232994928,0.0,0.06207046182671985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034696190286246945,0.0,0.0658856885296272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05301542249272267,0.06343782187381095,0.0717019390467327,0.0,0.07799633208034851,0.0,0.10976291109961217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136037677429096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04599434930577837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15835587879652166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06809448010069834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542320289048869,0.05593422722832068,0.0,0.07265837151691605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03352412720387033,0.06877498264645525,0.0,0.060726289472016325,0.05762327926386945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474698746591403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584751075994046,0.0,0.21893353985467728,0.0,0.0,0.06584246834704052,0.07812400166552462,0.0,0.0,0.09299699113510884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550528356494942,0.0475722711627668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773584196774494,0.06571871984729237,0.0,0.0739836599818517,0.0,0.0,0.06898176764147933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197977364269216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886638090198061,0.0,0.0,0.2728457624520915,0.13740061338059956,0.06944681619367847,0.0,0.062468812422917123,0.0,0.0,0.14087430510897986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05814126282963185,0.2641340498101513,0.0,0.07681415427101089,0.04856938828735187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855315788894301,0.0,0.07786884072686058,0.06467327040722387,0.07132215911846611,0.0,0.055153928587074616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967277933504659,0.1823515613501692,0.1758749735106591,0.06741852273359339,0.16342916922181494,0.0,0.07886826936692135,0.0,0.06556907943172326,0.0,0.0931765659230174,0.07463854654310023,0.0,0.07143554453500893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05504259723238402,0.0,0.0,0.19083349307737224,0.12383724145480725,0.07661146255007566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04995597062707697,0.06968665264874957,0.0,0.0,0.07502488752604451,0.0,0.13256654227900155
mentalhealth,happyluciddream,2020/03/07,"Got triggered and can't talk myself out of it As a psychology student you'd think I was better than this but apparently not. Oh, trigger warning for self harm.

I've been clean for nearly 3 years (minus a few days). I used to cut almost daily, never deep. I made sure it would heal and it mostly did. I have some scars on my legs and my ankles, a few on my arms but you'd have to know where to look because they are just tiny white stripes.
I am generally happy. I don't understand? I watched a movie on Anorexia (to the bone) and it somehow triggered me because I had eating problems around the time I used to cut.

I can't stop thinking about it. My boyfriend has a nightshift and won't be back until 7am (currently 9pm). I never talk about this with him. I mentioned it once but I don't really like talking about it. He knows I get triggered from movies in which people are cut. 

I am really triggered. I don't know what to ask for really,  but someone help. I'm scared if I start again, I won't be able to stop.",1.139117580681564,3.1576320473933666,2.9247799593771155,91.98927330173778,81.60663507109005,5.535635296772739,21.89596027984653,6.655083550727371,0.4097486346197243,786,25,172,8,21,261,127,211,0.124,0.7709999999999999,0.105,-0.5886,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,1,1,9,10,3,1,7,0,23,5,3,8,3,41,38,12,0,3,7,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,1,11,8,1,2,6,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,6,3,28,4,26,25,4,21,0,0,3,0,12,9,0,5,13,115,39,1,0.15175030118134447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195600634752648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508994098355484,0.14186604681967965,0.0,0.0,0.11668661462137768,0.0,0.18501115020955006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13421080953747802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978663902727764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15527844261273696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928326910454696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213685785085552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615410173929257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171502812279178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501939907481182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413753195341598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743203370235778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358980414657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340783747607504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16160911816407073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10520455169430977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452045439047162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916453861759263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15192852453660788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15830865964308038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857753774261274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740964423066936,0.0,0.0,0.25374009343257875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14302286297237074,0.0,0.0,0.3659134316709607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19447093117680544,0.0,0.0,0.0884868209624376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15797741529158946,0.0,0.2621270745985809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779906003038454,0.0,0.0,0.09772221863172716
mentalhealth,TheFluffy101,2020/03/07,"2020 sucks and I need to vent I learned one of my best friends has apposing and potentially harmful medical views for her future children

My work commute went from 20 minutes to an hour for less pay

My doctor told me my scoliosis has gotten worse 

I learned my SO has wracked up 15k in debts and didn't tell me

I've almost been run over 3 times while in the crosswalk

I had my groceries stolen

barely avoided 2 major accidents while driving caused by someone swerving out of their lane

Yesterday, my car got parts worth 5K dollars stolen that I'm not sure will be covered by my insurance

And this morning I was told my oldest family cat broke his back, is paralyzed, and will most likely need to be put down. 


All this, in a month. I don't know how much more I can handle. I can't get in my car without feeling scared of other drivers. A car swerved ever so slightly towards my boyfriend and I the other day and I couldn't hold back my tears. I cried in front of my mechanic this morning. I've been thinking of talking to a professional but I'm nervous because of poor experiences in the past with psychologists

Thanks for reading, I just needed to give my problems a voice so they stop taking up space in my mind.",4.202162286768093,5.630750269709544,4.859052558782854,84.07266366989398,71.19917012448133,7.513231904103272,31.231212540341172,7.984000788550335,2.157107699400645,969,43,189,13,18,311,157,241,0.141,0.81,0.049,-0.9419,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,2,8,12,1,3,8,0,17,2,0,2,3,34,35,14,0,5,4,0,1,1,1,2,2,1,0,1,6,9,0,3,5,1,5,8,6,7,0,1,10,3,33,5,32,20,8,36,0,1,1,0,11,14,1,2,15,123,39,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15280079683375755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346706539944589,0.0,0.09301985441264997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601379341923955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567560185969886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676172866860899,0.09841047271750146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15618637180046185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380299621902897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492661616873932,0.1438519937190623,0.0,0.07715608507517442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789370574688784,0.0,0.07972403977934107,0.14638201949208018,0.0,0.0,0.12204331998746012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15027430113077175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386164317826263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454969520495379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537223489747153,0.0,0.0,0.1540763878975815,0.0,0.1217990335117409,0.0,0.11217410951011354,0.3394394369307758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034016083690876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16524437557923852,0.1456681897901063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14601180003230674,0.0,0.15339906453336458,0.0,0.0,0.1526352421512673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15277316223932635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929235700668024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757537328435206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381799017304395,0.0,0.11473165839131952,0.12264923529604993,0.1333738364565242,0.14048800573181336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777604044442696,0.0,0.0,0.08897875824285638,0.0,0.0,0.2916201132860539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14145611862663013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470951206038346,0.0,0.11109021157413627,0.0,0.15550626954066374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rashmelo23,2020/03/07,"Parents need to realise some shits My father has been implying lately that im a stupid person. I have really low common sense and stuff. But can you just not make fun of me in front of my siblings about that? Can you just not imply my sister is smarter than me? Can you stop comparing us? 

Im not jealous of my sister let me clear that out. But comparison between siblings is a horrible horrible thing. I DONT want to compete with my sister. C'mon she is my little sister there should be no comparison between us. 

All my life I've tried my heart and soul to prove myself to my dad which either turns bad or turns good but he isn't pleased with it. I just want to hear ""im proud of u"" from my father ONCE in my life. He never appreciates even if i do something good or smart. Hes always bragging about  my siblings but NEVER me. Meanwhile they dont give shit about him as much as i do. I want to follow my father's footsteps and be like him one day but he probably think im not capable of it. 

This is for all those parents out there who have multiple children PLEASE DO NOT COMPARE THEM.

 when you come in at night to check if we're on our phones, sometimes just check if we're okay or not. Cause your appreciation and concern means a lot to your children. Dont misuse or neglect the wisdom you have.",1.8307576197387512,3.9725486113207538,3.3019811320754755,89.54263788098694,79.86792452830188,5.888243831640057,22.64513788098693,7.010146845296331,0.7045123367198838,1022,33,212,12,26,335,147,265,0.11900000000000001,0.74,0.141,0.9249,2,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,3,7,2,2,11,15,4,0,4,1,24,5,3,2,6,51,37,19,0,8,23,10,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,3,11,9,0,2,3,0,2,3,13,7,0,1,1,1,40,8,32,32,6,20,1,2,0,0,36,9,2,9,9,150,51,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762160153770818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792468008170473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817650891917788,0.0,0.09071031793972104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791255273607608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3702475160836031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06955248762384146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101746637176004,0.0,0.17664847760541755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868558338121728,0.12478608569572547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4549867958892704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187878211164822,0.0,0.0,0.10768076681617914,0.1487590625593127,0.05144635491791958,0.105542558802092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952593807195522,0.0,0.0,0.07029142847400814,0.0,0.0,0.114707238247585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741076653087915,0.0780817936164147,0.1624343140275859,0.0,0.0,0.0988209387172124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214562761901732,0.07135690935576511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23385589492215106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09194764058664599,0.0,0.2311849670541001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353583066925023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746062195509908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21618667222498647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106838391229876,0.10414863128178334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803909814425001,0.0,0.0,0.12054821341363288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995948834109038,0.06747473434121555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149469770468876,0.2290816481313603,0.0,0.0,0.253336180090124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863335883179404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IOnlyPlayAsDesperado,2020/03/07,okay so i have a serious problem and i honestly need help and would greatly appreciate some advise i'm a teenager and i try my best and i feel i'm very respectful and do pretty much everything i'm asked to yeah i get in trouble and yeah i deserve it but idk but when i get angry i just explode and then like 5 10 minutes later i regret everything i do and said and i don't want to be like this i want to be able to do something to get better and i just don't know what to do are say. what should i do. my current therapist thinks it's anxiety and because if that my anger comes out and wants to put me on medication should i i want honest opinions,-0.7048571428571435,1.4758968000000008,2.1428571428571423,92.16714285714286,95.28571428571428,5.371428571428572,21.285714285714285,6.961326702584282,0.7528285714285721,512,20,113,9,20,178,80,140,0.174,0.61,0.21600000000000005,0.733,1,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,4,14,1,0,2,3,14,1,0,0,0,34,31,18,0,11,5,0,1,2,0,3,1,2,0,0,6,14,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,1,3,20,9,10,25,3,9,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,3,6,75,26,1,0.18110527522982456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13854503984387884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693089849247944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040009482171004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19005881304614244,0.16017289857669575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600615845350252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3255314872820137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157226876085926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28386009438901355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996692052986684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139104845119192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995307229541906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17695777899298082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18244451155275787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13313321553396554,0.13428726680630498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18424917343045186,0.0,0.17329328959327073,0.0,0.18206082321863973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17227258943428864,0.14402218389624302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394236888751263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102771832296952,0.0,0.11604494765676746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295859381856375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494308189433879,0.4272823344257325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865199135907382,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Leonard_1986,2020/03/07,"Feeling lonley and down I was born and raised in the mid-size city of arround 80.000 people.

Bullied by a guy in the neighborhood, but I had some friends.
I had a little hard time growing up. Doing drugs, mostly mariuhanna and some MDMA. Hanging with the wrong friends.

I got into a mental breakdown at 15, I am 33 now.
I was was a little bullied in high school and dropped out.
Then trough additional training I managed to get a BBA in accounting. 

I never had a grilfriend, but some online dating.

The few friends I have I lost contact with and I am mostly alone and no girlfriend.

I work 10 min away from home and I like the job and the people.

But when I am out of work I am alone.

I have no car and I am lazy to go out. Or I have nothing to go to. I watch a lot of movies on netflix.

I play football(soccer) but training only because I am not good enough to play on a team.

I am getting mental help and being tested for autism.

Any things I could do to feel better at this moment?",1.1881023454157784,3.3695130696517417,2.9368869936034123,91.05432835820898,82.48258706467662,4.8235963041933205,22.50675195451315,5.916634753146586,0.2976811656005687,761,26,159,5,21,252,113,201,0.155,0.6940000000000001,0.151,0.0579,1,2,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,5,2,10,0,0,14,0,20,1,0,0,1,33,28,17,0,1,6,0,3,1,4,0,1,0,1,1,2,17,0,0,2,4,1,5,4,2,0,0,8,4,23,8,29,18,8,33,0,1,1,0,8,18,0,7,10,118,25,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30991750057692946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017451242105202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405706956851658,0.0,0.0,0.09120552321172967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132324641954511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194575091668489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17350895921970844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545950150097079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130234620734956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3467826471211615,0.0,0.15633808086542686,0.0,0.17006230283447066,0.12549217590145095,0.1196628926613232,0.0,0.0,0.1481449841265986,0.0,0.0,0.13402801543686055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002855487134435,0.15807924875727436,0.15007868964110152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14847241898902705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309562027779445,0.29991235778134234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16332532560365967,0.12719956515406342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015587766178173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11539434579172493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435621585367431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379095546303095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074520626603767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142103700790333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939931026732347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872432477078366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21784684429570486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635833994018155,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayraspberries,2020/03/07,"Didn't get the job. I was so ready for this period of my life to be over. I can't keep job searching, its been 5 months. I'm broke, bored and mentally drained. My depression keeps getting worse, I'm pushing away all the people that love me. I feel so godamn USELESS. Such a fucking stupid loser. I've been rejected from internships, full-time jobs, even fucking ENERGY EXCHANGE PROGRAMS. People tell me the rejection will get easier to handle and toughen me up, but it's just breaking me down. 

This job was perfect for me. It came down to me and 2 others. I was on the second interview. I already fucking WORK for this company in a different role!!!! That was supposed to be my in! My leg up on everyone else. How did I not get it?!!?!? There's always someone better. I can't keep this up.",1.3206410256410237,3.7770041410256425,3.220769230769232,87.40756410256414,84.51282051282051,6.5435897435897425,24.69230769230769,7.793537801064563,1.6256692307692306,610,25,120,12,18,204,97,156,0.142,0.742,0.11599999999999999,0.5024,5,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,4,8,14,4,0,6,0,13,6,1,1,2,14,28,7,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,11,4,0,3,1,0,1,2,4,11,0,1,9,1,17,3,20,16,1,16,0,6,0,4,4,11,3,0,2,81,28,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532018032018964,0.0,0.11551726369353747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043488331156514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278340907722113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587839610544563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957364315541075,0.0,0.0,0.14504727700526493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597423132507395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169557406374412,0.0,0.0,0.13265753469858116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019636552316033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3850369013579263,0.29013073081046026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5510674198893706,0.3701941098240231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805938007805233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12529904216528875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399074808871212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108123807529576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19249378722897809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762978309421886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134310036604995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106952795888284,0.0,0.14147911894679358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vvendetta23,2020/03/07,"""One is the loneliest number"" I've always said things like ""I want to die"" or ""I'm gonna kill myself"".  Most of the times that I've said it, I didn't mean it, it was a joke. Depending on a person, they all reacted differently; I've went through a phase of saying shit like that to my parents and let me tell you, they did not like me saying it. They said that life is beautiful and that I live fairly comfortably, I'm not disabled or starving, my family loves me and I should be thankful for that to God. My friends on the other hand, the meme gen z, usually replied with ""lol"", ""xddd"", ""same"" or they would just laugh with me, because mostly, it wasn't anything serious. Now I see that because I said it so often, I got used to feeling like wanting to die and not really doing anything about it. Whenever I had suicidal thoughts I just kind of felt accustomed to it. They weren't foreign to me anymore. I suppose it's because there were times where I've said it and meant it. 

I'm not good with sharing stuff like that but I do overshare a lot. Like right now, for instance, literally publishing my entire life story. But even as I'm writing this, I feel like I'm still leaving out some parts of what I want to say. I'm not a direct person; I hate confrontations. And every time I've experience a desire to share my emotions with someone, I've chosen to keep quiet. I'm guessing that me repeating ""I want to die"" is a way of me hinting that something it off. In case where a confrontation about my emotions does take place I can't express anything. I don't know where to start. And when I start trying to put my thoughts together, I don't feel like I'm making myself understandable enough. This has caused me to retreat into myself. There was a time where I talked about how I feel with my brother and his wife (I have a great relationship with my siblings and their significant others). I know it wasn't their intention, but they made it seem like it wasn't that bad, anything out of ordinary. Again, me being unable to express my thoughts and emotions kind of made it hard for them to help me or make them understand, still, it made me feel like shit.

Many factors must've contributed to my current state; my dad was a mentally abusive alcoholic, I was brought up in a very Catholic household and I turned atheist (me and my siblings have this game, where we count as many religious symbols in a room as we can and whoever spots more wins; one room had 23 religious tokens), my parents are homophobic and I'm bi, I live in a small village and in a conservative community. Basically, my life isn't perfect, but at least I'm not starving. 

About that ""mentally abusive father"" part, he's still in my life. When all of that was happening I was very young and he stopped when I was 6. He went to rehab and hasn't drunk since. I've erased most of it from my memory, but now and then bits and pieces come back. We all forgave him and he's been trying to make it up to us. 

Some parts have stayed with me and continue to affect my life. I feel like I'm unable to love/be loved back. I'm not sure if that's because of the abuse but I think there is a link. Every time I develop a crush on someone I (again) keep it to myself. There was this one and only time, that I had told a boy that I liked him. I was 13 around that time. We became a couple. From the moment I let him know about my feelings, I had regretted it. There were nice times, but for the most part it was just me, being embarrassed about displaying affection. You may think that it's normal for kids to be embarrassed about feelings, but I don't think I've ever exited that phase. A year ago my friend asked me if I was dating this girl I was texting with. I did love her, but we weren't dating and as soon as I was asked that question, I panicked. I started stuttering how I wasn't into her or whatever. I remember how my mind went blank at the thought of us being together. It wasn't nice. Later that year I decided that I had to let her go, because not only she didn't love me back, but I couldn't bring myself to love her the way she deserved to be loved. I was okay with her only being my friend, as long as she's happy. We still talk sometimes and she told me that she has a boyfriend now. 

I don't know if I can blame it on the fact that my friends and I are becoming adults, but I've been feeling very lonely. Not the ""horny-lonely"" (but to be fair, that too) but the ""wants-to-deserve-to-be-loved-lonely"". I know I wrote an entire paragraph how I'm unable to do so but hear me out; people that are close to me are now entering a phase where they're interested in getting a s/o or they have already got one. They're entering relationships that aren't based on crushed anymore, they actually know and love the people they are with. You're probably thinking ""well isn't it the whole point of a relationship? to love someone?"" and you are right. But the thing is, I never had that. I see my friends be with people that find them interesting and want to pursue a relationship with them. And here I am, literally zero people have that kind of interest in me. And I wouldn't feel as bad about it, if I wasn't reminded all the time of how I can't have this. It's probably so fucking sad and cringy for you to read that but I really, really want someone to love me. I don't know if it's bc of the lack of love I received as a child, but I really care about that. I know that I can't love someone unless I love myself but I can't shake the feeling that no matter what I do, I'm not going to be loved. That I'm never going to be enough. 

If I already went so far in exposing my darkest secrets and you survived reading my overemotional rant, I think you deserve full transparency. 

There were a couple of times where I actually considered killing myself. I didn't go as far as actually doing it, but there were times I was about to attempt it. I always wanted a quick and painless departure, but I suppose you never have that luxury when you attempt suicide. I has to be painful, even for a moment. And I didn't want that. I believed that I endured enough pain in life so I didn't want to feel any of it when I was leaving. But there I was, trading a second of pain for a lifetime of suffering. Don't get me wrong, I never wanted to die but I wanted to leave and dying was the only option for it all to stop. I used to think about it a lot, begged God to take me away, that was during my time as a person of faith. Now I think about it a lot less but more seriously. I don't think of myself as strong enough to do it, but in a moment of impulse I don't trust myself. Still, the most likely thing to happen is me just living with so much anger and sadness to the rest of my days that I will regret not killing myself when I had the guts to do so. Or maybe I'll get out of it. 

Most people don't know that part of me because I pride myself in being the jokester of my group of friends, I'm said to be a good person; always helping those in need. And I know for a fact that I have a soft heart and I'm sensitive to other's suffering. I'm good at hiding how I feel because I can't communicate it. Most of the times when I feel like this I just power through, because what else am I supposed to do? My days are filled with me doing normal stuff, a panic episode/crying session and then back to going on with my day. I continue doing my thing and bad thoughts are just passing through. But when I am alone and I have nothing to get done, I just let all of this to consume me for a while. I cry, punch walls, vent online and when I have nothing more to cry over, I'm myself again. It has worked just fine, but I know I can't do that forever. I really want things to change. 

The title of this is taken from a song ""One"" by Three Dog Night. I just thought of it. I like it, y'all should give it a listen.",3.679859794739496,4.3397076631708815,4.898082496775277,86.1928284168022,71.68969771745836,7.967340025797768,26.951045931243343,8.121257012390899,1.505008834053054,6106,198,1324,84,110,2025,484,1621,0.11599999999999999,0.713,0.171,0.9978,5,7,2,0,1,6,206.0,8,9,15,9,86,95,10,4,68,2,137,32,5,20,15,268,286,120,10,30,60,6,18,15,6,7,11,13,2,9,107,72,2,5,51,6,1,19,50,31,1,8,76,33,228,64,181,184,40,152,1,7,2,15,120,54,3,32,90,941,335,6,0.0,0.10467736108598856,0.08621443241972328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026104914445505164,0.031472209199384885,0.0,0.030500461170659195,0.06499578802291367,0.0,0.07351221161004498,0.0,0.0,0.02002644706742888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05841133152671224,0.0,0.0,0.09693663851690476,0.02621600699730056,0.0550620016416595,0.0,0.02766846685002669,0.0905783830574845,0.07376648651109377,0.14361553712019565,0.03252429717980016,0.0,0.033179132657339884,0.0,0.0,0.03215086896035614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03002539391668505,0.03025241217289032,0.03115331954760909,0.025367854389686872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516989819259647,0.09704559906881674,0.056976839730146576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15281795748196936,0.030768117190863267,0.0,0.0,0.025771169196330518,0.03013672786979045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02460100468070585,0.09937906550140747,0.0,0.12171546927691185,0.0,0.03890180121856894,0.02663846240650392,0.04962439570990987,0.0,0.0,0.02880694143197037,0.02776205880215373,0.0,0.20846540959160667,0.12623096775638118,0.028275823723089726,0.0,0.02691601003035072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13651414513201274,0.027225285319345725,0.06154390837632216,0.028250329575923206,0.08368321657440762,0.07410170573481968,0.04710638675636171,0.032467816503736195,0.03244158349570399,0.0,0.052083611740575686,0.031349191594062034,0.02638067403746212,0.029074960835372605,0.0,0.0,0.03319135756276922,0.034897411051868776,0.039478318956736334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0523515550221574,0.09774343791187157,0.09200034379096116,0.17802944469978607,0.0,0.0,0.09354726424822443,0.0,0.12045509596726955,0.12480492816678256,0.21581067127973103,0.0,0.07801247621231934,0.026061590836922367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510989971235686,0.37210638972191257,0.0835965568459109,0.05897265370263605,0.05971367710763183,0.02958565188446588,0.03207878203272898,0.0,0.0,0.05935567846140478,0.0,0.029735269079341806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02164853015788501,0.021836188163986508,0.09085206886561027,0.0,0.0,0.027636053328534096,0.05770787254448606,0.05651455027708632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977760674579668,0.08958969047469781,0.09400798717132536,0.034552258598713664,0.0653996416868174,0.1594529193844634,0.0,0.1020817406272183,0.10285552562729654,0.030768117190863267,0.0,0.02783898670431284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350237736667648,0.0,0.0,0.029604552148840405,0.03298981281522999,0.0,0.05891428347055209,0.0,0.09432946955008377,0.0,0.0,0.1264695603254158,0.03336017152327947,0.05029886459457563,0.16807744030460975,0.07025749161793884,0.0,0.0,0.046934355164969965,0.02680942049299332,0.0,0.0,0.06045830448570121,0.024360659704639524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476094091884887,0.022671411647581668,0.029125984488304307,0.0,0.0625328273347513,0.03138889941041878,0.11759073548262705,0.049241653497605495,0.0,0.0,0.06742451342406441,0.06442522955956255,0.0,0.027755496443025874,0.0,0.044284225256536684,0.04734025847396955,0.025739874677066774,0.027112841298125717,0.0,0.0,0.09782360781676007,0.1509587243989787,0.0,0.14027612014858273,0.2232366400354936,0.0,0.0,0.056279892434089616,0.0,0.03998810989092653,0.03203224299691889,0.0,0.061315254038106885,0.0708474567627066,0.05086925919003012,0.03243410281891955,0.07289595411870907,0.20843861839392888,0.04675076456390955,0.0,0.0,0.026478342664949188,0.10919871130619012,0.0,0.03287894926164304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021439348224036377,0.0,0.0,0.020919847114323747,0.0321980469791574,0.0,0.03792860295575917
mentalhealth,TheSilentUnknown,2020/03/07,"I’m absolutely tired of Social Anxiety ruining my life, how do I get over it? My life has never been perfect and I never expected it be to do so. Ever since transitioning into high school, I started to feel way different and finding things as simple as meeting new people to be one of the worst experiences. From freshman year to senior year, i found myself isolating from others and expecting people to come towards me instead of the other way around. I’ve developed multiple toxic ways to try to avoid thinking like this, but i’m in college now and it’s relevant all these years later. My social life has always been small and i’m not concerned about that. I find it extremely difficult to talk to people and it’s even worse when it comes to building relationships and bonds. So many lost opportunities and i’m sick and tired of anxiety ruining my life and I just want to be how I was back when I was younger because no fucks where given. How do get this out of my life? I’m open to pretty much anything. Thanks for reading my post! It really means a lot knowing somebody read it till the end.",5.0185915492957776,6.269902220657277,6.124525821596247,76.44453521126762,69.04694835680753,9.248075117370893,30.631924882629107,9.558583805096642,2.9155310798122067,875,35,159,19,15,292,129,213,0.184,0.7509999999999999,0.065,-0.9777,1,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,16,11,1,1,4,0,12,9,0,3,5,39,32,21,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,8,0,0,0,15,16,0,1,7,2,0,2,4,7,0,1,7,1,16,4,30,22,4,32,0,3,0,1,5,10,1,1,17,111,31,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366015324495876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221842021221498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926284921208642,0.10020356532856242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655281604279758,0.0,0.06861642229450651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19392346476289768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176027699904487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969604505417426,0.0,0.0,0.07434578386031493,0.10181828637280352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010670839352996,0.0,0.0,0.05691445712894035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057582735416728,0.0,0.0,0.12341783286101965,0.0,0.10406125755027136,0.11761743587032265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892736433896695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06186083561369616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3975274461824809,0.054991844487494834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287413216184714,0.09569572950124068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411965494362633,0.0,0.12261243031435935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274562583715935,0.0,0.17362867691383418,0.10871256112456816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627455956133622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23410783419868855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780276544656203,0.11451547312467993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22518384485992776,0.0,0.07210975466587062,0.0,0.0,0.12084888491454154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391820860987255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311200429615672,0.0,0.0,0.22948447000772504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967158194180969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047263916194197,0.0,0.10363147082389136,0.0,0.0,0.07478083353846919,0.07212483962463792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587456835280636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07642184376579128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06639166647747559,0.2680381469776644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470974586684005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21745767258662974
mentalhealth,Mistacll,2020/03/07,"Not sure what I’ll do next I can’t stand it when my internet friends hang out without me. My friend group is a group of 4, me, G,P,and A. (Letters for their names). G P and A started playing Pokémon together. I was never interested/had the money to play the game so they just played it without me, for days. Days went without being able to talk to any of them because of the game- now I can’t even look at/hear about pokemon without wanting to die. Same thing has happened with other games. They play them without me and now I can’t even think about the games or the experience without wanting to kill myself. Last night I was on a call with P and G and left to go to the store, saying I’d be back later. When I came back they were playing one of the games. I didn’t tell tell anything, but I had a full on breakdown. Like, shaking and stuff. Everytime this happens my mind is clouded with suicidal thoughts. This June P and G are going to meet up irl. I was going to, but possibly won’t be able because of COVID-19. If they do I don’t know how I’ll handle myself. I might actually do it. If seeing them on a call together hurts me this bad, I don’t know what I’ll do if they meet up irl. I actively try to avoid anything regarding the games they’ve played, but they always talk about it in calls and it’s struggle.",1.8546212121212131,3.5328416545454537,3.3391136363636384,91.53133712121212,77.9090909090909,6.183333333333334,25.27651515151515,6.996647511020387,0.9078151515151518,1025,38,227,11,24,337,139,275,0.10400000000000001,0.805,0.091,-0.8087,0,1,0,0,0,1,36.0,0,0,10,0,14,16,1,3,14,0,24,0,0,1,2,41,40,18,3,5,15,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,13,12,0,1,4,12,2,7,15,6,0,1,9,3,33,10,36,26,2,32,0,1,2,0,32,9,0,5,16,150,46,0,0.1984352829599188,0.0,0.09682210576759163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255702587086867,0.0,0.0,0.06747139852427153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16329533009414218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258448391715362,0.08284258631211283,0.1209643066826592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039369154451422,0.11347854997179192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797434136777622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297224741078254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310646329073008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705389174013676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153310607374831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691630163735183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17547566537887035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182549286645443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621453727236688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976961998100726,0.0,0.10905484198379432,0.0808756202083721,0.0,0.0,0.10780025777487684,0.0,0.0,0.048472727950455916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331783024162444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525423837636723,0.10018153412452996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765227616829233,0.0,0.10551908731353823,0.0931090353415814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672324416395644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185298304408334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890185080939599,0.0,0.0,0.07906361450818132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702267573099134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103723821334395,0.11358046188180408,0.1085279961042286,0.0,0.093511452902306,0.0,0.0,0.1594947638482587,0.17344118369610992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591579231067317,0.06357465842758465,0.0,0.07876772461698857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673622657478569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704227117066045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919757476709366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.573853594781328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EDAsdasd,2020/03/07,"Misdiagnosed AvPD? I'm turning to Reddit with this question because I feel like the psychologists I had have been of no use. English isn't my first language, sorry for any mistakes. I'm 23F.

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So, I've been in therapy for a few diagnoses for like 5/6 years now but I never made any progress. After getting therapy for a specific phobia, social anxiety with avoidant personality disorder (AvPD), the specific phobia again, and depression, I'm now on a waiting list at a specialist for AvPD.

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I got an intake at a personality disorder specialist and they diagnosed me with AvPD. I'm now on the waiting list but it'll take a year before I can start therapy. This will be schema therapy in a group. Now, the issue is that I'm not sure I really have AvPD and it doesn't feel like it's my main issue. I am socially anxious but I don't feel like it's so bad that it could be diagnosed as AvPD.

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Basically, I kind of began to realise I've been depressed and suicidal since I was a kid. My home situation wasn't the best and it never really got better. I decided to move out at 19 so I'm not in that situation constantly anymore. I also got my first ever boyfriend at 20 and he was my whole world. This guy meant everything to me and I could NOT lose him. The relationship was rocky. The problem was that I didn't mean anything to him so we broke up after 1,5 years. I fell in a deep dark hole and was suicidal for 1,5 years. Since the breakup I dated quite a few guys but I always attached very quick and I got so insecure about myself while dating them. They had a reason to not date me anymore or they just ghosted me. I basically realised there is something wrong with how I attach to people, especially when it's about a romantic relationship. I quickly attach to someone, I demand too much attention, I get enormously insecure about myself and about them liking me and that gets too much so they decide to stop talking to me. The last guy I was seeing called me out on this and I get it. Every time this situation happens I fall back into being depressed and being suicidal and it feels like I'm of no use to this world, that I'm not good enough. In the last therapy I had I realised that I get depressed and suicidal when a romantic relationship fails because I've always been 'lonely' in life, as in that everything I had to go through I had to it do on my own. And when I have a relationship, it means I'm finally not on my own anymore. So when that support suddenly falls away it makes me feel alone again.

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It seems like the depression gets triggered by 'failing' in relationships and that makes me feel like I'm not good enough. I've made this clear with the psychologists I've seen and told them my main issue at this moment is me getting depressed because my relationship ended and I feel like I'm not good enough for anyone. However, I don't think they understand how much it affects me. I've been looking into what this could be. Although I don't want to self-diagnose, I do want to have an idea about what I could present to my GP so I can get a better diagnosis and a better referral. I've been thinking about dependent personality disorder, co-dependency, or something with having an anxious attachment.

​

I'm curious about opinions on this matter. What could I be dealing with? Should I wait a year to get treatment for AvPD or should I seek for another diagnosis? I'm at a loss to be honest.",3.9879555555555584,5.761029447407408,5.472851851851853,78.08883333333334,72.3037037037037,8.911111111111111,30.12962962962963,9.444778638647367,2.90351851851852,2747,119,514,66,54,926,253,675,0.215,0.7090000000000001,0.076,-0.9987,1,4,2,0,0,0,83.0,1,0,8,12,36,39,0,3,33,0,53,4,0,12,5,102,115,46,5,11,16,0,7,9,0,4,4,0,1,7,37,32,0,5,20,0,0,5,19,19,0,2,29,10,75,20,76,70,14,76,0,12,3,0,33,30,0,7,50,359,112,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04502118309998647,0.0,0.034762459139475343,0.07234003710004136,0.2354953543231532,0.2641003618768994,0.059121357885056285,0.0455814503820342,0.03325396787169123,0.0982160856052344,0.1293298765417301,0.03039481140314869,0.0,0.035771607905760464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04084092713159574,0.03342528122537554,0.03629512875533632,0.07949561840040888,0.0,0.036989253114225074,0.0,0.04561844776175456,0.1153354410057668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04438711203446273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04697497275416344,0.0,0.17353387217105634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04481503707586278,0.22464075512550696,0.17648208189499148,0.0,0.0,0.1494590765965443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0385009811967959,0.1347465141040569,0.0,0.0,0.03932055606618223,0.03662483975211561,0.0,0.07813497784906966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385602405687426,0.1863272650354388,0.0,0.0476185969936747,0.0,0.07395008964447418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20439868080815776,0.0,0.02470465869162989,0.1093801973433089,0.139065783397209,0.0,0.0,0.12912460464398853,0.03843984206600743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04360334704016421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04907165536638647,0.0,0.1361122627104802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045266685202988,0.0,0.07086671672879309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030703718933615162,0.1911325542047029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03650334339927355,0.04863113349298373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226358439259057,0.05803231685324035,0.0,0.0,0.094701828371655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04620108708398367,0.09586502000382592,0.0,0.06705255380443187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03013620489361272,0.11386739596006047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041594339941784034,0.0,0.0,0.04869567036637201,0.046235051887921416,0.0,0.0,0.0556952145290744,0.04469377744428114,0.0,0.2800191708640124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03463947947768424,0.03957290422810664,0.04534805886820874,0.0,0.0,0.07191666479155302,0.14658426240787065,0.0,0.08862314708595515,0.0368314769629609,0.06692972733820997,0.0,0.04866042833903092,0.030767861218504437,0.0,0.0,0.03634236029838156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19019384920316854,0.04932855383220437,0.0409693899512105,0.0,0.03268357489022998,0.03493905277090612,0.0,0.0,0.24855520547986226,0.0,0.0,0.05570686565753268,0.0,0.0,0.0253473535504137,0.0,0.0,0.041536869359866314,0.0,0.0,0.04728221875067394,0.0,0.045253172786897465,0.0,0.07508720013578463,0.0,0.0358668030106563,0.05127875035131512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04853202666547104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04752695903185525,0.2641003618768994,0.1399643245427866
mentalhealth,SuperWhoPotterLock67,2020/03/07,"Woke up this morning feeling sad and all my support network has either been busy or not even looked at my message. I don't know what to do. All my plans for Saturday have gone at the window and I'm not in a good place mentally and i just want some kindness I just need some kind words or anything right now, feeling really low and like no one cares.",2.625,4.273018166666667,3.5122222222222237,91.255,75.66666666666666,6.466666666666668,25.88888888888889,7.1686216300943375,1.0594555555555552,276,10,59,3,6,88,56,72,0.121,0.649,0.23,0.7944,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,2,21,16,6,0,2,7,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,3,3,6,6,6,13,5,10,0,2,1,0,1,7,0,4,3,40,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21001132287106572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601977040938235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16855997610344556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580778367101374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21405318617009847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5315118328766391,0.14025356155199234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467988783482925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21430726448457232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571858224981757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892306906012876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729329797788645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26663408561988994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16349035402117273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21794300388448695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28960271713001684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505260572131092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Imstrghtclownn,2020/03/07,Speaking to a counselor Anyone here know anything about this? My mental health is ruining my life and my relationships and it is completely out of my control at this point. Girlfriend thinks I'm bipolar,6.288333333333334,8.846235611111117,5.8066666666666675,74.80500000000002,67.8888888888889,8.133333333333335,37.0,8.841846274778883,3.7155666666666662,166,9,25,3,3,51,30,36,0.057,0.943,0.0,-0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,0,6,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,5,5,0,3,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,18,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340301614341691,0.0,0.27542974562025657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3509267909028506,0.0,0.3753947335163891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3557706604418182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18394247630313126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23640864894193525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372990784468245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163998728904727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3593427558668684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21446237303307286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goldiehamham,2020/03/07,"Disturbed sleep schedule, sleeping TOO much Hi! Long time reader, first time posting. I am going to book an appointment with my doctor, but I figured it won't hurt seeing if anyone has experienced something similar.

I have been struggling with anxiety and depression for a looong time, but I don't have any sort of diagnosis for either (which is strange because my doctor keeps prescribing me antidepressants, but whatever). So, with these issues I do know that your sleep might be affected, but it has NEVER been this bad before. 

Basically, since around Christmas when I stayed up too late studying for my last exams of the year, I have not had any kind of normal sleep schedule. At first, it was just the regular ""won't sleep at night but sleeps during the day"" kind of flipped sleep schedule, but this past month I've been switching between not sleeping at all, or sleeping WAY too much. 

For example, Thursday - Goes to class, takes a nap after lunch but wakes up at 8PM. Stays up all night, falls asleep around 8AM on Friday, plans on only sleeping until noon but turns off alarm in my sleep and wakes up at 4PM. This time, I stay up until about 9PM, goes bed and falls asleep again at around 11PM. Sleeps through the night, wakes up at like 6AM on Saturday (today) and then drifts off to sleep at around 10AM and wakes up again at 5PM. To be honest, right nor it's about 7:30PM and I could probably sleep more if I went back to bed.

I've been sleeping more than I've been awake. It's kind of scary. Has anyone experienced a sudden shift in sleep like this? Like I said, I've been struggling with sleeping normally for like 3 months now, but no matter what I try I can't flip it back to normal. Luckily I only have class twice a week so I usually keep up pretty well, but I'm still worried my sleep will ruin my studies..",5.530067080745339,6.412676851428577,5.280211180124227,84.3099192546584,67.62857142857143,8.258385093167702,28.07453416149068,8.321376580360154,1.7620049689440989,1438,45,281,19,23,443,185,350,0.12,0.789,0.091,-0.8955,0,0,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,1,0,3,20,17,0,4,9,0,27,27,24,1,3,46,37,26,0,6,17,0,0,4,0,4,2,1,2,0,14,14,1,2,2,2,0,5,9,8,1,3,10,4,23,9,56,20,7,78,0,3,1,0,3,29,0,5,43,178,37,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490073704228792,0.0,0.0365046930865375,0.0,0.0,0.0667320823774347,0.0,0.0,0.16991912451588204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338550618509887,0.03984314115121957,0.029088891112468224,0.0,0.0406051192941856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0380995180374586,0.0,0.0,0.030774629172249355,0.0,0.041100066876358185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768427162658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117904415525533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02711965040759344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05108388075802524,0.0,0.0,0.04980594992184453,0.0,0.08482918849279733,0.0,0.14907512301291687,0.02622496264188305,0.038897128821090914,0.053828798915068615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325183230945533,0.0,0.0,0.042229568932417576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050622025012521055,0.0,0.0,0.07617726013007133,0.0,0.0701575051429888,0.0,0.036803621551927006,0.0,0.0,0.1343423691623482,0.14026265300589336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725844794588522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045552921342548514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045701346716076965,0.04854709728407523,0.051448855120909014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0407515293849538,0.04539143380093834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038025644695673634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03947342142977663,0.0,0.8595573422476847,0.0,0.0,0.03673620489852742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258543114187748,0.03810823445852008,0.0,0.0,0.09977194189954734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0358785416207245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130068634023133,0.0,0.04523177054785744,0.0,0.0,0.03239788111329638,0.0519042687057272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05255543260284062,0.0,0.0,0.03787690181978134,0.03827708187432382,0.0,0.0429048634744697,0.044235735025649016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0484606803294958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030729293600169107
mentalhealth,unkewl_tendency,2020/03/07,"Mental Health Technology Conferences? Hey Everyone,  


I'm trying to get into the mental-health startup scene. But before I do that I would like to attend a conference to get an understanding of what Technology/Apps exist. Perhaps find cofounders and go from there. Would anyone happen to know of such conferences. I know There's AnxietyTech ([https://www.anxietytech.com/](https://www.anxietytech.com/)) but I don't know if they are having another one.",8.667571428571428,12.571674042857143,7.190000000000001,61.32500000000002,65.71428571428572,9.714285714285717,28.57142857142857,9.957137785484203,3.774428571428573,373,13,47,10,7,112,51,70,0.0,0.971,0.028999999999999998,0.1901,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,6,1,0,0,0,12,15,4,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,5,1,8,13,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,32,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244850662417648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14969206100407725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18216916894888974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20456582209591795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195668309986518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22369943629054206,0.0,0.12166850542027945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18931320570509574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4551211953190745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3529638429757013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459031453459626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4314913421250092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14506842332451786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14534854670305689,0.0,0.0,0.2228683248464756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041573491331268,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bengalcat420,2020/03/07,"Help with school anxiety Waiting anxiety

Hello! I recently applied to RN school and am waiting to hear back. Applications were due January 15th, and I have been patiently waiting to hear back. They have 60 days from the deadline to make a decision, so when I called yesterday to verify she said they would be sent out within two weeks. 

I cannot stop thinking about this and if I’ll get in or not. I know it’s only two weeks away but my anxiety has been so bad and I keep preparing for the worst. Any tips on how to be less anxious in terms of waiting? I know I’ll find out soon but it’s wrecking my mental health. 

I work in a psych field right now in a locked unit so I’m already stressed working here. The program starts in September and I am currently living in Utah with my boyfriend. I would be moving back home for school (East CoastG and if I don’t get in I don’t know what I’ll do since I’m not the biggest fan of my job/the state. Only moved here for the skiing. 

Any advice would be appreciated!",1.1566103841283275,3.5017909126213635,2.7389658083579604,91.3781110173069,84.04854368932037,6.301055297593923,22.548754748839173,7.586124646067393,1.001947910510764,792,28,170,14,23,259,118,206,0.125,0.8370000000000001,0.038,-0.955,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,2,13,3,0,1,8,0,19,1,0,2,0,34,38,16,0,5,7,0,0,0,0,3,1,3,1,0,4,10,0,6,6,1,0,3,5,3,0,2,5,3,19,0,27,26,3,35,0,0,0,0,10,15,0,3,16,106,23,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632197720446875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13136073954809505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16189903852666954,0.0,0.2731898734171865,0.134478388150822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183956308984608,0.2745972565477732,0.09939126330817752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155050253288405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676928030502263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087980341749017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438426496412015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653119803983226,0.2683276199075257,0.0,0.07978826524026793,0.0,0.11940422572959256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812625945748705,0.10580591748159103,0.0,0.0,0.19625953867144333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10511221194431533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945839403994356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199617091544502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530358518600445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18106662530950973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753507941200447,0.0,0.0,0.10165729584267226,0.11323183409967358,0.0,0.0,0.3614166353598496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098468973821897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425528991540568,0.0,0.0,0.09952060305409507,0.1363569484371654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627436439148949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325645011964888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19096925660556952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17332130119851458,0.0,0.0,0.2536822774302098,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Plondrop,2020/03/07,"I'm honestly dead inside right now I can't find or can think of anyone else to talk to anymore, and a recent event that has left me traumatized got me incredibly paranoid for basically everything online along with sending my self confidence down the drain, I have major trust issues now. The people who I've known for years now are now complete strangers to me. I can't find any happiness anymore since I'm always worried that if I get one person mad, or do one thing wrong, they could do something bad to me. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm so sensitive to the point where I have panic attacks almost daily for no reason at all. I'm scared that I might end up going crazy because of this, I've even considered suicide more than once already. I know taking a break might do me some good but honestly I've got almost nothing to look forward to outside of this place, it's honestly scaring me. I've considered seeking a psychiatrist but that would just cost too much money and I honestly don't see myself worth the trouble or the money. The only three people I can confide in I don't know how I can talk to them because I'm scared they'll reject me and they'll treat me differently. Help me please, I have no one else.",5.008576530612245,5.714371293877555,5.842283163265308,80.44954719387755,68.71428571428572,8.573979591836736,30.006377551020414,8.660442795831766,2.2665153061224492,977,36,188,15,16,321,139,245,0.182,0.701,0.11699999999999999,-0.8744,1,0,1,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,4,0,10,18,2,4,9,0,23,0,0,2,1,29,39,11,2,3,7,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,10,5,0,0,8,0,4,3,7,10,0,4,2,2,28,8,22,31,5,21,0,1,2,0,11,10,0,9,9,119,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21778699454914605,0.0,0.12000401057838213,0.0,0.0904854554224557,0.0,0.0,0.07395106787165652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32354069054249146,0.07603779214240923,0.11142321662131284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371437247088078,0.0,0.0,0.09079843988748514,0.13258120995252912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114018202698115,0.0,0.0,0.08682490130827576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136165149516326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18168680252951008,0.0,0.09631675507673992,0.0,0.0,0.07182576451424012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773397054412784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198783905890722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05681534185894821,0.0,0.06180290700368416,0.09121105792006592,0.17394835901141448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11576223118800495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289020950143336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135026611695567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929201552807353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118152941152157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131932424523656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307248255169997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994088605118188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434480288004283,0.0,0.0,0.1158110330176616,0.22106748771819512,0.08270629905778976,0.0,0.127590101836299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15078168791823449,0.0949528881861676,0.1136165149516326,0.11937054712309254,0.10280020156930884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180908854118753,0.10737364117781194,0.0,0.0,0.09286856367923572,0.0,0.0,0.3266214104374489,0.0,0.08665655152486157,0.0,0.11344588484353575,0.0,0.0,0.08995588649102365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371805022885799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895056840998447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176352341889265,0.1748119701753841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224606777977319,0.06968010124474375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043692948565807,0.0,0.07725009976093841,0.1188967743241414,0.0,0.0700289143155178
mentalhealth,alicevinrace,2020/03/07,"I sometimes feel suicidal. I know I don't have it in me to go through with it. I tried a year ago and chickened out at the last second only to end up in a ward for a few days. I changed my work environment and relationship since then. I eased out of meds and weekly therapy because it made such a huge difference. I was in a toxic workplace. I thought everything is going to be rainbows and sunshine now.

I broke down in front of my students. I felt my depression and anxiety crawling back. I felt like I lost one of my classes because of worsening behavior, and I felt like I failed despite teaching at a much better school. The kids felt terrible, I had support from another teacher, and admin told me it happens. Kids be wild sometimes. Every teacher's ongoing struggle will be behavior management, and I've been proactive in seeing what veteran teachers do with their kids. I felt really good about having this growth mindset even on the bad days, but the past two weeks, I feel myself falling into a slump. 

At the end of the day, maybe I just suck as a teacher. I have all these ideas swimming in my head, but right now I just feel like shit. Friday was a disaster. I wanted to prove to myself that I would be a successful teacher at this school. Because on the good days, it feels really good. I'm going to be known as the teacher who cried in front of her kids. I don't mind being more closely observed (go ahead and tell me what I'm doing wrong).

My motivation is at an all-time low. My boyfriend is picking me up later today because he thinks I'm burning myself out. I've been enjoying working and actually wanted to take some work home. I just feel like lately, I'm messing up more, and I'm not being a reliable teacher right now. I should be thinking about strategies to re-establish classroom expectations and consequences, and easing back into the curriculum, but I feel like I'm going to cry again. I'm not capable of taking my mind off the kids. I want to do this job well.

My emotions and thoughts are all over the place. If I can't get it together before Monday, I'm going to really hate myself.",4.3947630522088375,5.664770375903617,5.528855421686746,80.06211847389561,70.5421686746988,8.521285140562249,31.182730923694766,8.936278230431713,2.6672827309236937,1666,72,313,31,30,553,210,415,0.127,0.742,0.131,-0.1002,1,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,1,9,14,27,3,1,23,0,29,2,2,3,3,64,73,21,1,7,9,0,11,5,0,3,0,0,1,5,14,22,0,0,20,1,0,11,5,13,1,3,15,13,47,14,53,47,7,66,0,5,2,0,12,31,2,2,29,209,61,14,0.0,0.0,0.07645392012233344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944857100377137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215210242992725,0.0599341037176266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048572846898645,0.06541523163973352,0.19103479246709448,0.0,0.06666626193720324,0.0,0.0,0.06929024039306092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287916549666521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17211773646691547,0.20210550049646095,0.0,0.06747887634966791,0.0,0.0,0.0818543870673343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812815815671454,0.13878174232817056,0.0,0.0,0.0517464730585924,0.0,0.06600947450284264,0.0,0.07041189617505986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376830751828984,0.16791015242368035,0.3761198979645076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04093229743814143,0.0,0.2671533662471314,0.1971375000277504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928067923089942,0.0,0.0,0.07734997508696766,0.08040509997655244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858693837752723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844254898160091,0.0,0.0,0.07774583366736433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0430566455453683,0.06386205049182808,0.0883771522067875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19137830361443176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552338329578026,0.0,0.0,0.07413241959866157,0.0,0.0,0.07870859909847255,0.0,0.08702420424770148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15821327055362086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05759296729110841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053088947838823265,0.0595852937300974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478965802871096,0.0,0.0,0.0818543870673343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057042713101246,0.0,0.0,0.08411376197392305,0.0,0.1338132816522958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585796855350799,0.062431231176700464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042054419691469,0.06480821872556156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497143313863884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190374179754087,0.0,0.08569727625121447,0.08890556077479916,0.0,0.0,0.1178121525161765,0.0,0.06847743239573204,0.0,0.08959492306160351,0.0,0.0,0.10040128375010222,0.0,0.12439517356791313,0.0,0.0,0.07426238650796749,0.07486249598620075,0.0,0.053191461225891835,0.0,0.07653218306410092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13863064193982896,0.0,0.12568809109696896,0.0,0.0704420259437218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17110940170132674,0.0,0.0,0.055654405255379485,0.08565852060089016,0.0,0.0504519423142649
mentalhealth,ArchieSoulsby,2020/03/07,"Is this anxiety? To begin, I have no idea if this is to do with anxiety or not, it's actually why I'm posting this. 

​

I have been experiencing fainting and dizziness, however it has only been in some specific situations.

These have been times like:

I went for a blood test and just after it was done, I felt extremely dizzy and almost passed out.

I had some vaccines and, again, only felt ill about 2 minutes afterwards.

Today I went for a contact lens trial, to get them tested for my eyes and whatnot, and around a minute after they had been put in, I experienced the same dizziness as the situations before. 

​

What I am wondering is, why do I only experience this after what has happened, and why only in these specific scenarios?

I was not really afraid of any of these ""procedures"", and I felt 'emotionally' fine after them, (as in I was not scared), and I feel like what happens to me is not really in my control, perhaps my body's reaction.

​

As far as I know, I don't suffer from any other medical issues like diabetes, etc that would cause this dizziness, and I am always fine day to day, never fainting. 

​

Is this some sort of anxiety that only gets released afterwards? Or adrenaline? 

Any answers much appreciated, as I have been looking for some clearance for a while.

​

Archie",7.535958188153309,7.707899390243902,8.099442508710801,68.29024390243903,63.22764227642278,11.256213704994195,36.67711962833914,10.914260884657429,4.233268060394891,1054,47,177,26,14,351,126,246,0.052000000000000005,0.872,0.077,0.7856,1,0,0,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,3,1,4,8,0,2,6,0,28,8,3,2,1,40,43,19,0,2,8,0,4,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,18,13,0,1,8,0,0,4,7,3,0,0,16,8,24,5,32,26,7,27,0,1,2,0,4,8,0,10,17,137,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0717049219427589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357862235146917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061140429129960386,0.398072425689188,0.4464252468159773,0.14990475551620536,0.0,0.16863374259574065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654119043401211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252523220226969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161862416900867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548319205570775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241296656293302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477577548746004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519454662740888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826540050722707,0.0,0.0,0.08194852820039658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187657897228755,0.0,0.0,0.03715319922081639,0.05249342503158175,0.2116541405451244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677950818070207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12995450562754846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294886725228612,0.0,0.0766930041839298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040382146566292285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769440965422886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170386882780893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402238009594278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05401553272157779,0.0,0.05667154840124319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794205208193707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037258762070234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738667079769804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094145080740935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356531538298719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16518698942001342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0428462062090989,0.0,0.06964951724275661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362315713975913,0.19891015402996035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968486044984491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05219738606237812,0.0,0.4464252468159773,0.0
mentalhealth,Seoulcxol,2020/03/07,"They Don’t Support Me.. After years of procrastination, I was finally able to find it in me to come out to my parents about my mental health, which didn’t turn out the way I’d expect. I was publicly insulted, personally harassed and shamed for it, by my own parents..",6.257820512820516,6.2377896538461535,7.281538461538464,73.73012820512822,65.92307692307692,10.01025641025641,34.641025641025635,9.725611199111238,3.241017948717948,210,9,40,4,3,71,40,52,0.185,0.7659999999999999,0.048,-0.8271,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,1,4,2,1,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,6,7,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,0,8,1,11,4,1,8,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,3,29,11,1,0.2570645885848138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22143838101156854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28160169157684184,0.23495237684883186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732476367835595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590606430569894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.570879608160834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244588833088495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29171384877284884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796124544254146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20404590504693693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655411668550179
mentalhealth,Scarlettskies,2020/03/07,"My constant changes in mood are exhausting, I feel like there’s something wrong with me I just don’t understand what’s wrong with me or how I’m supposed to get better. I feel like I struggle so much with supposedly simple everyday tasks, it’s like I’m just stuck in bed all day because everything I have to do I’m just sat thinking what’s the point? The only reasons I have to get up, wash, feed myself etc, is to survive and I don’t even want that. I feel as if the world around me is going on without me, I don’t feel sad right now, I feel quite numb. I wish I could just stop existing. I quit my part time job because the thought of it before every shift I would get extreme anxiety, for me it’s exhausting having to get ready, walk around in public, talk to people even if it’s just for 2 minutes. 
I keep putting things off all the time, which in the end makes me feel even worse. I’ve signed up for counselling even though I’ve been about 5 times now, it never helps in the long term and yes I do give it a proper chance. I want to see a psychiatrist, my sister has depressive bipolar disorder and I see some of it in myself. I just feel like depression shouldn’t be this hard, that there must be something else to it, as to why I’m struggling so much. I know online mental health tests aren’t exactly accurate, but I’ve taken a few for bipolar and autism, so many symptoms match up to mine and I just feel like I need closure on what’s going on in my head, because I don’t even know at this point.",3.761190476190478,4.3354098566879,4.596842584167425,88.73731422505308,71.45222929936305,7.76439187139824,26.73582044282681,7.793537801064563,1.2876177130724904,1181,37,262,14,21,382,158,314,0.105,0.82,0.075,-0.7003,2,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,4,24,17,0,2,10,1,21,10,1,3,5,54,56,16,0,10,12,1,9,5,0,3,8,0,1,0,17,10,1,2,14,0,0,4,8,10,0,0,5,11,36,6,40,45,9,38,0,3,2,0,5,21,0,4,18,163,53,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687938358101631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010802125142584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644558189556877,0.0,0.0765211723093888,0.0,0.0,0.07953303920761008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513074109063703,0.0,0.0,0.09717903665829376,0.0,0.07179931583322563,0.0,0.0,0.057995413942410076,0.0,0.15490782216830262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306402347125727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751223895505989,0.0,0.07964854567738085,0.0,0.10029226963343804,0.29697936154344184,0.0,0.07576729556611664,0.0,0.08082050325422199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3637579593753754,0.2569751942036506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879323840435848,0.08626608103528953,0.10221506439987252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08055684299771201,0.0,0.09229094794087864,0.09558809432357064,0.0,0.0,0.06027610851593985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923857677818145,0.07993116462106377,0.0,0.0,0.09884294985505304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196687158033991,0.0,0.0,0.0795824806575919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06002690705495859,0.09117176658838573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906251687134309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13221324387568584,0.06667966023524638,0.06935717257670541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839346314213951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738207427255542,0.0,0.062343992734698865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17001998341437885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040137701125786,0.0,0.19129666453787156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245983514211764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679708510014646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433202000394024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846024904725554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518291883143928,0.0,0.18802225163837474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346848618370816,0.0,0.07227983947535152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059743439497974275,0.05762152932140025,0.08835272709823723,0.07139191724903499,0.1573113035801431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361707903858743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608243641270186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114504408595725,0.0,0.10341150215959816,0.08668632689954535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09164319836710733,0.06388149283568649,0.19664190624163946,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,punkhora,2020/03/07,"I'm an empty shell and a mess I can't tell what I'm feeling anymore. It all feels so unreal and like I've split into different dimensions and I can't access the other parts of myself. I'm not myself, I'm barely a person anymore.
I'm only alive when I'm around others. I'm not good at being alone. I hope I die.",-0.6372857142857136,1.3132732000000047,2.9939285714285724,89.18232142857146,88.42857142857143,5.214285714285714,15.892857142857142,6.6274283507984215,-0.13214285714285667,244,5,53,3,8,90,45,70,0.187,0.6679999999999999,0.145,-0.4296,1,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,11,13,5,1,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,2,6,3,4,12,2,4,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,30,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748770845928587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5264161885098009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362646103205861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754460294291432,0.27728926144801386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683910895003622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22260713503942647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26360469719225177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296623195596491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20185066046600775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874051862034461,0.0,0.0,0.23173934043573585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23197359769182624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Grendelsmere,2020/03/07,"Huge work mistake triggering anxiety I made a huge mistake at work. Like so massive that the legal team, our CEO and VP had to get involved, but it ended up not being a big deal (legal was unconcerned, and CEO/VP didn't think additional action was needed). 

The problem is my boss is really triggering some old trauma/wounds. She's extremely passive aggressive and unpredictable, so this was an issue before the mistake happened, but because this is happening after such a huge mistake my mind is running in circles. I'm terrified of getting fired, and she's giving me the cold shoulder (which to me seems like proof that I might get fired). 

The only reason that I know the mistake wasn't such a huge issue is because \*other people\* outside of my team invited me to a meeting to get more information from her. 

Anyway, I've been a wreck over the last couple of days. I can't eat, I can't sleep, and my OCD has been worse than ever.",4.8998109153416385,6.32531470949721,5.798994413407823,78.01118607649335,69.50279329608938,8.412720240653202,31.646325741297808,8.841846274778883,2.776321529866782,739,32,130,13,13,243,109,179,0.20600000000000002,0.687,0.107,-0.9701,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,0,4,6,9,1,0,14,0,18,3,2,5,2,30,31,9,0,7,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,6,1,0,5,2,0,2,5,7,0,0,9,3,16,2,14,20,2,17,0,0,0,0,11,9,0,3,8,86,24,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268397378501892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20214536877828784,0.0,0.1410871384246632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18345916281133834,0.0,0.10692997438415497,0.17093682102483646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16965906114154666,0.0,0.0,0.14685328321778685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997936615569876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465033464833753,0.15905447014284407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2932401636681493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461129568458794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112163684658334,0.13515252987051415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16200708681677914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688791664250856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758920248093207,0.16741494839056398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294169273417467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739835873820898,0.0,0.0,0.1261015443237426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149477362597519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586522003817412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621839832219948,0.1704743035910983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15094189113404027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592391391589348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624061861911274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414148240513469,0.0,0.16896861644280542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,muffinhart,2020/03/07,"i'm not scared of death anymore, and i don't know what to do. i'll just get straight to the point. no reason to pad any of this out.

i'm not scared of death anymore.
i've always been scared of death - the idea of no longer being able to think or breathe anymore terrified me ever since i was 5.

but now i'm not scared of it anymore, and that scares me.

i've always had trouble with mental health, and have had a few panic attacks and/or mental breakdowns since i was little. now with the stress of school, the stress of expectation, my want for my girlfriend's attention, and so much more, the idea of suicide seems more tempting than ever. i just don't want to feel anything anymore. i don't want to feel hurt, or want. all it ever brings me is more hurt than before.

i don't know what to do. neither of my parents are home, my older sister is out with friends, and my little sisters are at daycare. all i have is my dog and my cat. if i did try anything nobody would find me for a while.

but at the same time i don't want to cause even more pain to my friends and family. i already make them go through so much. what should i do?",2.3033229259589656,3.6922081101694917,3.2042105263157907,94.21322479928637,75.94915254237287,5.646387154326495,23.438001784121322,5.750287758089431,0.21518983050847496,878,26,198,4,19,279,113,236,0.184,0.696,0.12,-0.9798,1,0,0,0,0,1,30.0,0,0,1,0,10,15,1,8,8,0,24,3,1,3,5,49,42,15,4,9,10,3,2,0,3,2,2,0,1,0,7,12,0,0,11,0,0,2,11,13,0,0,6,2,24,2,31,33,11,18,0,2,0,0,7,8,0,4,8,133,31,1,0.08934833027470337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859810424511403,0.0,0.1486899366681181,0.0,0.0,0.060759928471595566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4430476750998326,0.0,0.0,0.14705212568991713,0.0,0.0,0.1016466244312351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602884824829559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178534732242116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059013729482269586,0.24246204006574176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842296539852316,0.0,0.09035440080766642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166275518959654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380605966642393,0.0,0.04668081485219552,0.0,0.05077871512819312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497309696572477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962366028308666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912984710103817,0.20172677872800124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820701131654867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910099916766092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596407042595195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18008420393068744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313626066051013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507292293796,0.10483101440416648,0.0992107471080533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446305204215701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918649644657886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4472663277360933,0.09042528031769544,0.0,0.08133936419348775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781972420680695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20469642090635198,0.0,0.0,0.0977325714997061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057250802312576926,0.0,0.0,0.05209972990341827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066165127809003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634998006571704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634704902983181,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MoldySeb,2020/03/07,"Broke down in front of my manager I went to work today, and had a pretty bad nosebleed. I didn't really think much of it as they've been happening pretty regularly. I couldn't stop it so I asked to go home.

For some reason I asked one of my managers to come into the break room. I told him how my fiancé has been strugling with depression and about her suicide attempt, and how its been affecting me at work. Tears streaming down my face, but I made it to the end and told him everything.

I feel so stupid now.

The manager was so supportive. He said that there is life outside of work. That mental health is important.",2.7711529933481147,4.785761089430896,3.8326977087952687,87.50008869179605,76.3170731707317,7.724759793052478,24.189948263119,8.575989854853784,1.5963886178861797,486,16,100,10,11,157,84,123,0.13,0.779,0.091,-0.7274,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,4,8,5,1,0,4,0,10,3,1,5,0,18,23,11,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,6,7,0,1,3,0,0,4,2,4,0,1,11,2,16,1,17,11,2,15,0,2,0,0,9,6,0,1,4,68,22,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185017917049197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422321348120903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146738346480883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671911109009464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087635547167755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15309636697919995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861322619227012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681178896487484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506367654938814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810702653183402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708713358280392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032070529454755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16118588949395074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17166911276537422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522420975425608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11543113425982356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3466070739471753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912827055507984,0.1751444779702546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203844238047774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424172242008917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863313213644279,0.19330708443115788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915109958104584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16146847614085452,0.32554658462789315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15791282629550984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720426402284059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fatboy1312,2020/03/07,"Carnivore diet is doing great things for my mental health I'm autistic and also have emotionally unstable personality disorder, I've also been depressed ever since I can remember and of course due to my conditions I have anxiety. I've been through so much shit in my life its a miracle I'm still alive. My whole life I've been eating SHIT food that tastes delicious but is terrible for me. I have very little self control when it comes to food. Everyone knows food is connected to gut bacteria is connected to the brain and mental health. However recently I started the carnivore diet, that is literally only meat and animal products nothing else. I was inspired by Joe Rogan and a few others and its been great. I mean sure it's boring as hell but I've noticed a difference already. 

I feel more mentally clear, less anxious, I don't feel like my world is coming to an end every second of the day which is amazing considering the financial stress I'm under. I'm not angry anymore, I don't get paranoid that people are laughing at me or judging me I feel more confident. I'm not looking to food for comfort anymore. 

Only thing I would say is I need more salt, I can tell this because I used to train mma and when I didn't get enough salt I would feel a bit dizzy sometimes.

If you are struggling with mental health please look into the carnivore diet not only for mental health benefits but also physical benefits. I've lost 5lbs in 4 days, yes it's mostly water weight but the lack of carbs means I'm not bloated with water anymore.",4.031919191919194,6.0793797744107785,5.451954208754209,77.13437575757578,72.8047138047138,8.657723905723907,29.38841750841751,9.281916038205594,2.9043999730639736,1231,52,215,29,25,413,166,297,0.14800000000000002,0.6779999999999999,0.174,0.909,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,2,8,19,3,2,11,1,26,22,4,2,3,41,49,20,0,5,10,0,5,1,0,2,6,1,0,2,13,12,12,1,9,0,0,2,7,9,0,1,7,11,25,10,24,40,11,19,1,2,2,0,5,7,3,3,11,135,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710357755976449,0.1893660078210956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060382869873190685,0.08917084931695718,0.234838414954478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048116298982043705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08617345195091505,0.0,0.0,0.08811437094400303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359860963038354,0.0,0.0,0.08852910501600096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180939882433557,0.0,0.06798413519301187,0.0,0.0,0.08246728483874886,0.0904630690320224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08076728307194646,0.0659376733304181,0.08878803178925042,0.06991044637338954,0.0815579989171532,0.0,0.0,0.07139863818497846,0.06650373096562402,0.07542304085858162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964184339794993,0.056389135485393975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817802205404343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08247756908029412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17404592260854684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33560468858831954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04337903904246497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150420738631786,0.038562255833997264,0.07911073895117376,0.0,0.0,0.1325662334744193,0.0,0.08616375326132282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17196047705894585,0.0,0.0,0.3977251526401023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05802420381448298,0.05852718052070925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573751566147599,0.08986476279250552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18009434434583022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0547216063233143,0.06892049874654281,0.0,0.0866437851499679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793596428260269,0.0,0.0894147259714925,0.0,0.0,0.06277000460542873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234343487087688,0.0,0.1620454116825418,0.06529348059422073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806590322397887,0.0,0.05586857386167484,0.0,0.06303530773292466,0.0,0.0904164979191584,0.0825170091203654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439260637266426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899016808664878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104878010958362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817202465034318,0.0,0.06512728066967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611808019927537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812491375857935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214225297297828,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goodchipssir,2020/03/07,"Changing back to your old self when you’re in an old environment So I’m having this issue where I’ve made huuuuge strides in the last year, but I’ve reconnected with close friends from a couple years ago and being with them, I revert to this old version of me that doesn’t really exist anymore. 

I’m quite loud, boisterous and honest but I found myself being reserved, polite, quiet and self conscious, like my old self - who I’ve haven’t really been in about a year! 

Any tips???",7.0104255319148905,6.395014936170218,7.433489361702128,75.25300000000001,64.53191489361703,10.073191489361703,30.50212765957447,9.3871,2.5165514893617025,380,11,72,6,5,125,67,94,0.0,0.862,0.138,0.9285,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,1,1,5,3,0,0,4,0,6,0,0,1,0,11,10,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,3,4,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,7,3,10,5,1,16,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,12,40,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13398523506727344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278709104728664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14990005045863178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11622491591865998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15989651494264898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16724445021402454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657280248402603,0.11677801041194373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776118862802854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12320731331622375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384418894713674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430216564930189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6344254268270971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607664863591039,0.0,0.0,0.19366094729516148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4730468198751367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920066713918511
mentalhealth,AvacadoStaplerTM,2020/03/07,"How to forget things you’ve learned? I’ve recently learned about quantum immortality and it has scared the shit out of me. I haven’t slept in 2 days, I can’t get the idea of not being able to die. Please help",0.6325000000000003,2.8864463409090924,2.055636363636367,95.99845454545458,85.5909090909091,5.3381818181818215,20.163636363636364,6.742157984588678,0.05135999999999985,165,5,39,2,5,53,36,44,0.179,0.637,0.185,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,2,0,4,2,2,1,0,8,6,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,7,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,21,5,2,0.33028507605245344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21300655025122808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3427837636538856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17256032022361234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22138312436735869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3728516484255896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3625538307587328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261166667133292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3306729798258842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33903288424376515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21942672846931016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notaproctorpsst,2020/03/07,"When your SO causes your mental health to take a dive I think I just need some place to vent about how my brain consistently makes me believe that my SO values other, more immediate fun things more highly than me. Sorry that it's long.

In short: Long-distance since 2017, me (28f, depression, general anxiety, social anxiety) and him (31m, ADHD), see each other every 2 weeks, sometimes 3, he knows about my mental health issues, we're fairly well-attuned to each other, all in all very mature, loving and benevolent relationship.

Right now we're in a 3-week spell until he supposedly comes to see me next weekend.

It's been going pretty great for a few months now. Last week I felt safe and vulnerable enough to want to connect more and ask about more detailed future plans. We know we want kids and roundabout when, I wanted to ask him how exactly he feels about it as I know he's still scared of not knowing how to do things right/be a responsible enough adult. Also wanted to ask more about closing the distance, if he'd like his own place in the same city first, move in together in my existing flat or a new one, etc. Basically just create connection through specifying plans together. I asked him one Thursday if we could call (we only call about once every 1-2 weeks). He had to work a lot, and I didn't want him to push back his work just for some talk with me, as he has an important deadline at the end of March and his contract is on the line. Our call got pushed back more and more. Almost a week later I asked him if he'd be free the next night, and he replied that he was at a friend's house right now, drinking wine. I felt hurt because I'd had stepped back, but then not gotten first priority treatment when he was free. Instead, a hangout with a friend was more important to him. I didn't want to bring it up as this has happened a few times in the past, and I communicated how it made me feel like I wasn't important to him, and he always understood and said sorry, but yet it doesn't change. I attribute this to his ADHD by now, and a very secure attachment in that he trusts that I'm there and will be there, so it doesn't matter so much WHEN we talk.

Next thing is a wedding we were invited to together abroad. The couple changed their wedding date, I can't afford booking another flight. My SO didn't seem very fazed about me not being able to come. I know there will be a lot of people from his past there, and I told him how my brain was telling me that he'd just be happy to go there without me, because in my head I'm always keeping him from the more fun things (hanging out with friends instead of having a phone call with me).

And then, to top it off, yesterday my country's health government declared an area as at-risk for corona that my SO is going to travel to tomorrow for a yearly work getaway. They go to a hotel in the Alps, work around 6-8 hours a day, and spend the rest of the time drinking or skiing or going to the sauna together. We had planned that he'd come up next weekend, two days after returning from that at-risk area. Now if he goes, it's highly likely that he won't be able to come to see me. He has not decided against going. He says he's on the fence and hasn't decided if he'll go or not, but even that hurts me right now because it's in line with the other things mentioned. 

I'm having pretty bad anxiety with these three things stacking up and I'm just so tired of not being able to just brush these things aside.

​

tl;dr: long-distance bf repeatedly chooses friends over even just a call with me, might sacrifice the one weekend we could have this month for a voluntary work-getaway instead, intrusive thoughts try to convince me that he doesn't value me like i value him.",9.163649166630776,6.085812373831779,8.704999353977346,75.68592316637238,62.11081441922563,11.800697704466169,36.71135707825488,9.618343705623,3.1802016538179934,2944,94,606,40,31,944,315,749,0.046,0.8340000000000001,0.12,0.9942,1,0,3,0,0,0,93.0,9,2,2,10,55,24,0,1,37,0,45,11,3,9,3,118,100,55,0,14,26,0,4,4,5,5,4,2,0,2,38,43,3,4,16,11,3,18,17,5,0,7,22,10,73,21,88,60,26,108,1,3,3,1,80,34,0,16,60,394,111,6,0.15420389153105146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354874084178925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05147097422078877,0.0,0.0,0.04110559878168343,0.08553999384668602,0.05569328401606295,0.062458202222416624,0.0,0.053898741851764964,0.11796555494664253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04575805219538536,0.2402663709771747,0.0,0.0,0.11857327414920853,0.04291793610919188,0.09400126100855408,0.0,0.0,0.05791166000560277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476169415832567,0.26243235713642826,0.0,0.0,0.052803291339751535,0.10875151368900686,0.177110664544414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207950646846031,0.056874557658071985,0.0,0.0662991687119148,0.0,0.044271861939506295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070740511052964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04552629258553992,0.10622256083339156,0.05732603367165344,0.06790014401648106,0.0,0.08661561958281162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0519800805777464,0.03672109697372585,0.09870661217948877,0.0,0.0,0.0874438342408119,0.0,0.0,0.15885005877013128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20448779210339987,0.0,0.04111031295031997,0.056670111600181226,0.0,0.0,0.045453997338245455,0.05471763664817197,0.0,0.0,0.052752560178214176,0.163911525798452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086165851891277,0.0,0.0,0.050619923716524726,0.05931019567201463,0.11005230346982298,0.0,0.0,0.05364959977654536,0.0,0.04568783467787695,0.0,0.0,0.1412440433421788,0.0418989176390147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044830968352944,0.0,0.0,0.13646559149150336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739908946423655,0.046391677542886894,0.048637150220265164,0.03431076500327282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360083568062574,0.05452865342517782,0.0,0.0,0.08205605001943023,0.05463144426382812,0.03778586773416244,0.038113410553286604,0.0,0.0496436931153194,0.218663450731041,0.04823663538126642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05474070393666075,0.10449254772952074,0.03909300273428136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813670866694196,0.035635187435653484,0.0,0.10740683068311843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458719665785628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05518575676964932,0.0,0.17558570774902552,0.04889440439395814,0.04087637461216633,0.05146166550298726,0.0,0.12288053670510858,0.046793810452245434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042519684191177375,0.0,0.0,0.05239714935397937,0.0,0.0,0.05083719723583551,0.11507908780697686,0.0,0.0,0.04104914232332826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03864737850675468,0.08262883124870939,0.04492699933659527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390411649658766,0.032935875737619615,0.0,0.04080688837794107,0.059945019484401764,0.05907822966870504,0.0,0.04911614220683795,0.0,0.03489810671343336,0.0,0.05021159844134797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723436005108513,0.1819069010201573,0.0,0.2061551005847656,0.0,0.046215939209766035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04954901621907727,0.0,0.18710378265681613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062458202222416624,0.03310075012427298
mentalhealth,TheGuytotheRightofU,2020/03/07,"Need some advice. It seems like it's on and off, there are times when I feel like helping anyone I can, being nice to others in any way I can think of, helping homeless people, things like that. And then the next day I get the feelings of fuck the world, everyone in it. On those days I hate to say it but I enjoy watching others suffer. I wouldn't ever want to be the cause of it by any means but if I see someone going through it I almost find a sadistic joy in it. I want to help people one day and watch them suffer the next. I prefer the first but its almost like the extremely negative feelings are more intrusive than intentional. Hard to control. It's like I just want to watch the world around me burn and then I want to help the world around me in any way possible. I dont know. I dont know if I'm losing my mind or what. Not to mention the general depression, anxiety, and feelings of extreme loneliness I have constantly..",2.279340557275539,4.173866110526318,3.736191950464399,88.1824613003096,77.36842105263158,6.7863777089783275,23.808049535603715,7.724431198458867,1.1534953560371517,731,24,151,11,17,241,105,190,0.19,0.6559999999999999,0.154,-0.8256,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,3,6,14,2,0,11,0,10,1,0,3,1,41,30,14,0,9,8,0,5,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,15,7,0,1,11,0,0,1,5,6,0,2,0,10,20,8,24,27,2,27,0,4,4,1,7,12,1,7,17,103,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111657502171831,0.0,0.0,0.2288378709932709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23311040630954574,0.0,0.08741168154544826,0.0,0.0,0.07989607692102668,0.0,0.0,0.2034384505774852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738064952679447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347883942260547,0.1281568423530333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22107256827281632,0.0,0.09841545438489843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678332191082624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335837029460217,0.0,0.1091841915193041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311013372788628,0.08163025646220314,0.0,0.0,0.1044352669128146,0.097192938166079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563526822501916,0.05969824735251875,0.0,0.06493888989650712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235814042778524,0.11281208811773523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063551226847471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12559306155837574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791182030362609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783223856127107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12446704247949042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537411226715022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472534141178056,0.0,0.0,0.24304221596180325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742827395790912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15843260300924092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881554206489115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086735467689566,0.0,0.0,0.0910536499189031,0.10402169496171633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681555438909237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591195412097056,0.0732157861512913,0.0,0.0,0.06662828343124774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695835764954527,0.18139496047536696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,houmousandcarrot,2020/03/07,"Is this what life is supposed to be like? I feel like I live my life in cycles of feeling sortof okay and then periods of anxiety, suicidal thoughts, feeling absolutely horrible. I just don't know what the point is, if I'm just going to end up feeling horrible again.",2.9723076923076914,5.325965461538465,4.577538461538462,80.76746153846155,77.07692307692308,8.775384615384615,31.55384615384615,9.3871,3.3248415384615377,212,11,40,6,5,71,38,52,0.223,0.598,0.179,-0.7703,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,5,2,0,0,0,11,13,3,1,1,3,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,4,3,6,11,0,8,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,6,25,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21179691353654245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452155188539644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5599543343000635,0.1977886257788311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734574836451898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15215485121309907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3911083891897959,0.2705193304590965,0.0,0.24447218836850565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617219064951439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30283957684608925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21979567713780612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,enlguy,2020/03/07,"Basically having a full mental break (not break as rest, break as in broken) I've been through extreme amounts of stress lately.  Brief summary of the past year:

Met the love of my life (at the time), had to leave due to visa issue (I am an American living abroad), left France at the end of my 90 days for a job in Poland.  Poland was shit.  After a  few moths I was miserably depressed and tried hanging myself in my apartment.  Someone convinced me to leave, went back to France to stay with this person (different person), and after two days she said she wanted her house back, this after saying I could stay for months. I scrambled to make money online, went to Romania.  Had a shitty month there, got a little more money together went to Belgrade.  Really liked Belgrade, decided to stay. Not realizing a lot of people just do border runs, I started the residency process.  Apartments were getting messy.  Noise, owners who wouldn't supply documents for the residency application, it turned into three apartments in a month, all the while trying to hold down a real job at this point (working remotely, but started with a financial firm based in NY).  So stress was already very high.  Then the apartment I took that was supposed to be my HOME after having everything approved with everyone, literally ... I got a Facebook message while running errands from the people I was renting from saying I had to leave.  No discussion, wouldn't say anything else,  just that I had to go.  I tried to find another place, more problems, and middle of the week, just had  a total nervous breakdown.  I was found myself walking the streets for hours not sure where to go.  it was a total mess.  I tried to talk to the people, and they wouldn't, which caused more suffering.  I get in to a new place, but at this point, I am broken,  I feel so utterly broken.  I maybe could have tried harder to talk to these people, it needed to be impressed upon the what state I was in.  I have a message drafted now i will send, but... I'm already in a new place.  I could go back, maybe it would help....  where I'm at now, though, work is not letting up, I cannot take time off (it's serious work, there are multi-million dollar deals riding on my work).   I can't just quit, I don't have much in savings and am living in foreign countries, I have no family, nowhere to ""go back to"" just ... the stress is killing me, I'm not sleeping well, having panic attacks, and mental breaks nearly daily I don't know what to do.",4.361666666666668,5.968986010615716,4.970249469214436,82.73121284501062,71.05944798301486,7.356475583864119,27.733014861995755,7.8897218956490685,1.7680747346072183,1925,69,356,25,36,617,237,471,0.152,0.818,0.03,-0.9948,5,0,0,0,0,1,90.0,0,0,1,6,19,21,3,6,30,0,45,4,2,2,4,49,73,17,1,10,13,0,1,1,0,5,1,4,2,2,16,10,0,1,6,0,7,15,14,14,1,2,24,5,39,7,68,38,12,93,0,3,0,1,22,39,1,1,32,249,55,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15647995393040925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434489262746853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834470659831997,0.0,0.0,0.08065905135782299,0.0,0.21807107258903194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07283388981188654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16982378119592792,0.0,0.0,0.09144934389625872,0.07309484651269997,0.06106611600253758,0.0,0.0,0.07407547022669188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922790070214251,0.0,0.06279640707212257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774804370546304,0.06372040040358493,0.0,0.06683826467097867,0.0,0.03584919959679145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480136848336814,0.0,0.0,0.07773825399080136,0.0,0.0,0.07408470795083764,0.0,0.1611765472518968,0.0,0.11341050633719328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047522814320077635,0.07490980388425858,0.07111853893918561,0.0,0.06982227533002136,0.08180914762494937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400124006351579,0.14071473487031844,0.0,0.07844040937984786,0.0,0.03896481764054363,0.0,0.07997835353196668,0.2252187725567293,0.07703312038957168,0.07250011285729929,0.05007880767838176,0.03463818700337698,0.07106048415741889,0.12521210019944962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06027669384034436,0.06399007040312073,0.0,0.047326339214930915,0.0,0.1424572756083898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14290116503971634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16977524943642902,0.0,0.05211970044232201,0.052571494582260486,0.0,0.13695143550622832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318594170767198,0.0,0.0,0.06768212780107823,0.1966126920698518,0.12381439168006785,0.2222264106800756,0.0,0.1340469433319093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784178017514755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541093886709169,0.0,0.08069978792015461,0.04542039260843583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744219103945208,0.16914771535296091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277789060191073,0.0,0.0,0.07095126110193954,0.0,0.060073389003033474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003668518441068,0.2267100845951892,0.0,0.0,0.2436473304307945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682246552944597,0.0,0.05330801994079802,0.11397356183217396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965894693503093,0.0,0.08268478788199066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877257310949022,0.24068242665549186,0.07711890356154258,0.06925905441433493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05849997304536862,0.0418186911231098,0.0,0.05687174984429619,0.0,0.06374766683195142,0.19717519204969888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064643463488742,0.0,0.0,0.050365366930031366,0.0,0.0,0.045657312755940635
mentalhealth,nkklkmarie,2020/03/07,Please help me understand myself I know this is not the best place but I can’t afford to see a therapist or something. Lately I’ve been feeling this heavy weight on my chest from the moment I wake up until I fall asleep. Been crying almost everyday and I’m not surprised bc I’ve been going thru shit haha. But my emotions have been whack for a while from being depressed to getting really angry for the smallest things. Even when i just remember an experience that’s already passed. I didn’t have the best childhood which makes me lash out to my parents. Only to my parents tho never to anyone else. I’ve already suspected I’m depressed but I don’t understand why I’m angry all the damn time. TIA!,2.029673913043478,4.671659268115941,3.421576086956524,85.89366847826088,83.13043478260869,5.7688405797101465,23.11775362318841,7.1686216300943375,1.1515927536231882,561,20,102,8,16,183,91,138,0.266,0.642,0.092,-0.9847,3,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,4,8,2,0,8,1,11,5,4,1,2,19,22,9,0,0,7,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,1,0,6,0,0,3,6,4,0,0,5,3,14,4,14,16,3,16,0,2,1,0,3,4,2,2,9,68,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512918971302328,0.0,0.3334567238273346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564360696224603,0.15480657935418854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171131612990569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659620749370214,0.0,0.0,0.26026218013998226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262138774407516,0.16995264158470655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09979159865523156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779216631705866,0.0,0.0,0.07639417285804295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893676914672962,0.0,0.08586627560665229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012704923039236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303351393318774,0.0,0.1704328195145973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008518064388639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652767878659112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490854093447485,0.0,0.0,0.3355286691605234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785385282479766,0.16584825529286726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679025928711613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17115222141085495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12039685019852332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508872770994075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163142240829248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542375766295226,0.10037554976346157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810009775996164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.314573980162835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18398337371293405,0.0,0.0,0.13633259951470414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kitoh68128,2020/03/07,"I'm afraid of being touched This'll be long. I'm 18F. I dealt with anxiety and depression pretty heavily for 3-4 years. I feel I have overcome depression, and I'm a lot better at coping with anxiety than I used to be.

I struggle with my sexuality. I suppose I'm asexual, and knowing this and trying to escape it was a large part of my depression as a teenager. I am still afraid of winding up alone, and I am also afraid of human touch. I have never been in a relationship, largely because I can't handle the thought of sex or kissing. At the same time, I long to experience dating and love.

When I was younger I tried therapy a few times. One of my therapists was a very nice man, probably in his forties, who I wanted to like. On about our 3rd appt, he told me to sit all the way back on the couch (anxious mess I was, I always trembled on the very edge) and close my eyes and breathe. The fear was paralyzing. I have tried to analyze what I was even scared of. I was completely irrationally afraid he was going to rape me, but even more than that I was simply afraid of him getting any closer to me. Had he simply sat next to me, I would have broken down crying.

He isn't the only man I've been scared of. Teachers, relatives, even guys my own age. Women too. I am scared of physical exams. I haven't been to a doc in years because of it. It's so ridiculous, but I felt violated even by my female pediatrician's gentle touch. Even my best friends' hugs are accepted rigidly and reluctantly.

Why am I like this?! 

I feel left behind by life sometimes. My friends gush about their dates and crushes, but I can't do any more than smile for them. I can't even tell them about all these feelings, because it sounds absurd to be afraid of a doctor touching you or a therapist asking you to relax. My twin sister has expressed similar feelings and is actually seeing a therapist, something I can't afford to do right now. 

What would cause someone with no history of sexual trauma to develop aversions to touch and fears of intimacy?",3.725048668650953,5.240685428927684,5.1979808543158255,80.83515968144157,72.51620947630923,8.266462875070387,28.895583621591182,8.841846274778883,2.3257929531011183,1591,64,310,31,31,535,210,401,0.166,0.7170000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.9451,1,1,1,0,0,0,50.0,1,2,3,2,16,34,3,14,17,0,38,9,2,2,3,41,58,21,0,3,5,1,10,2,2,2,2,1,1,5,11,17,0,1,8,1,0,1,8,22,0,1,17,13,50,12,55,35,10,32,0,3,2,5,27,14,0,3,17,214,61,2,0.0,0.0,0.09029583509170114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583307115027632,0.0,0.07399612783771814,0.07699228946322356,0.0,0.0,0.1258470103754615,0.0,0.14157024092411052,0.1045324497470935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650296615970385,0.0,0.0,0.07114978179883444,0.0,0.16921610516947722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710442172095436,0.08183517745048234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950536961395533,0.0,0.0,0.0970158400068262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016397506073305,0.0,0.0,0.2390876026223418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947082737820033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666907588570521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051199758669727,0.0,0.2082437253563171,0.187143591211216,0.0,0.0888432149115916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297674287889658,0.0,0.04834305387460719,0.0,0.052586874691415465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161914882465164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05085201333751759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100534007411986,0.0,0.06535660501432074,0.09041087083904953,0.0,0.0,0.16377210003413153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866561233232272,0.08351184762692976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136476339678623,0.0,0.09840659869514283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06270065513417654,0.07037315873318803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020086504915164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413617370210653,0.09976288250760368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934248457092912,0.0,0.0790200292792147,0.0,0.0,0.27791571650802144,0.0,0.07373435065047076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840028425113192,0.07123403785087558,0.09151443737757704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389449790326805,0.0,0.0,0.09673234218612232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087521128039467,0.0,0.10581600505087728,0.3223030379602565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345840514599504,0.1079098579383506,0.0,0.0,0.08841628501595279,0.0,0.1884651854393292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991612500616238,0.0,0.15269371652093272,0.054576532562471865,0.07344592794375329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349384291309883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146117271751148,0.0,0.0,0.11917244415918753
mentalhealth,shroom152,2020/03/07,"Feeling accomplished. After almost 6 months of the worst depression I have ever experienced, I finally picked myself up and spent almost  12  hours cleaning every inch of my home. It sounds stupid but I already feel slightly better knowing I’ve achieved what seemed to be such a daunting task and that I’m no longer surrounded by clutter and old reminders.",10.750952380952382,9.8562586984127,9.269841269841269,66.00571428571429,57.253968253968246,11.574603174603176,43.22222222222222,10.504223727775694,4.822231746031745,290,14,43,5,3,89,55,63,0.151,0.748,0.10099999999999999,-0.5089,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,2,4,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,12,8,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,5,1,6,6,1,9,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,3,6,26,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5111950038395421,0.0,0.2816763727116552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257492051347791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198477392041364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308895912650386,0.21506039401580013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25812565132863313,0.0,0.0,0.27961553692116065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560380621002911,0.0,0.2513713067449069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14027954662155032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20373930860919245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678435067912805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23237137508989456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vidsagster,2020/03/07,"The Importance of Food in Mental Health  We all know how food affects not only our physical health but our mental health too, by influencing our mood. Have you noticed that eating certain food makes you feel great while certain foodstuffs make you feel ill at ease. There is a good reason for that as research shows. Nutritious food is required for our body to function well, more so our brain.  Studies have shown that cutting down on processed food intake, refined carbohydrates, and sugar, and increasing fruits, vegetables, fish, and nuts resulted in improvement in depression symptoms. Vitamin supplements and probiotics also have a positive impact on improving the mood and overall mental health of people. Research has proved that people who followed the Mediterranean diet consisting of more fruits, vegetables, olive oil, lean meat, and nuts, have a lower risk of developing depressive symptoms later.  To know more on the effect of diet on mental health, please read the article in my blog:  [https://hubpages.com/health/The-Importance-of-Food-in-Mental-Health](https://hubpages.com/health/The-Importance-of-Food-in-Mental-Health)",13.739698795180724,15.960317066265063,9.437012048192774,56.970337349397624,50.02409638554217,11.70024096385542,40.09397590361447,11.407655852321104,5.2484115662650614,947,39,109,21,10,261,106,166,0.121,0.684,0.195,0.9481,2,0,0,0,0,0,50.0,6,3,0,2,6,11,1,1,8,0,7,24,2,8,4,26,14,12,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,9,0,0,0,5,7,13,1,7,3,0,2,1,4,1,0,0,6,10,5,21,14,5,14,0,2,0,0,10,10,0,0,2,70,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05331536819974676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405449760619359,0.0,0.07442492215931759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484423972166576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821927786863799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741994319980459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5643169787145805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05591899652171242,0.0,0.07350307392263862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6377965733967732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327934296059753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900447255762169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40312148688917454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590337312795574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050704962257858116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244011498722884,0.0,0.0,0.07318280657616012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668728296738037,0.0,0.0,0.06854708382737705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385897378641148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994365460414485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SAFVoid,2020/03/07,"I’m lonely and I don’t know why Like I said in the title. I can’t see any reason in my life that I should feel like this. I have good friends that care about me. My family is supportive of what I do but when I hang out with groups of people, I just feel alone. I’ll be at a restraint with my friends and just feel like no one there is hanging out with me or I’m just a space filler even though we’re all at the same table. I just don’t understand.",0.3629922992299228,1.7637779504950508,2.1054785478547866,99.95533553355335,81.37623762376238,5.677007700770076,17.16281628162816,6.42735559955562,-0.5996345434543455,347,6,91,3,9,114,63,101,0.07200000000000001,0.737,0.19,0.8608,0,3,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,9,9,0,0,4,0,9,1,0,1,1,22,20,6,0,1,6,0,3,3,2,1,1,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,6,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,1,5,14,8,12,17,2,10,0,1,1,0,4,7,0,1,4,59,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209623727415229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450827656946526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21752072026739872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14091318575607428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20112385680957195,0.0,0.32362282243273904,0.3048292067109296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296615664527258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17894471203505394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11724951930343155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069276550314525,0.31269060308362256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14456894018527594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790742668686913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21935547737466912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029411391859816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17000933891323478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.242102795798698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20961160703129292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22210096991160552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19251180639360216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JoeTheTortoise,2020/03/07,Recommend me a book I am severely mentally ill. Severe social anxiety makes my life so scary. But anyways please recommend me a book that is a generally very powerful book about keeping an overall healthy mind/psyche,5.258684210526315,8.472472500000002,6.43605263157895,65.83986842105264,74.0,11.168421052631581,38.44736842105263,10.686352973137794,5.881031578947369,177,11,25,7,4,59,32,38,0.28300000000000003,0.457,0.26,-0.2785,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,4,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,15,5,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173783945565763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525707141597904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20070763147598408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18967619020127416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28636219291080944,0.0,0.28691633491781604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31191771695778986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6420303011921836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28966103396184706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23445827837497454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ItchyCoffee0,2020/03/07,"16 and need help urgant So basically my whole life I’ve had depression very simple things like yelling or someone being mean to me can trigger it while larger things can cause me to break down when I was 12 I invited a guy over and it changed the way my parents treated me my mom treated me with distrust our relationship got worse and so on eventually I invited another guy over and was sent to live with dad I OD but lived sadly a year ago I invited a third guy over now I’m treated with more distrust and am reminded by the constantly of what I did which causes me to have a deep depression I have no freedom in what I do, go, or wear can’t do normal teenage things like drive, have a job, even have technology (bought phone myself and hid it) And whenever I tell my mom about wanting to do something or be given more freedom she always says you only have two more years and refuses to let me live with my dad due to his financial problems and his girlfriend my family knows I have bad mental health and get me counselors but I doubt they know the severity of it all of this drives me in a deep depression and I’m just sick of all of it I have nothing to live for no friends and no one likes me at school or anything I feel worthless and like there’s nothing to live for I’m thinking about OD again because of all this above but scared of what happens when I die and if I attempt to do this again I want to make sure it works can anyone give me advice on how to make sure it works this time because last time i took a good amount of different types of pills and still lived and also help me get rid of my fear of dying I’m hoping that I’ll be reincarnated and finally be able to be happy for once and live a better one than this",6.057062014367398,5.153616069637888,6.537164638616041,81.84792845623811,66.57660167130919,9.897727605922887,32.26521037970972,9.134995656068208,2.463197214484679,1375,48,295,21,19,449,186,359,0.161,0.7,0.139,-0.8529,3,0,1,0,1,0,6.0,1,1,1,4,15,26,2,3,11,0,26,5,1,6,5,55,51,33,4,7,9,5,1,4,2,0,4,2,0,3,20,22,0,1,5,0,1,5,4,12,0,4,9,3,42,14,44,36,8,34,0,5,0,0,25,11,0,7,20,197,62,5,0.08284496245647023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095513850089886,0.07343706063865807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662510865453787,0.06893364533535529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687016652095257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05792712399088516,0.0,0.06817434525340249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06917208321475905,0.10100304034864617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326963696828383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17020919427596554,0.0876389854289365,0.0,0.0,0.0895259732033405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21406273430953546,0.0,0.1719599829941076,0.08655535311558228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05471831637304925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809885759111525,0.09322361503408964,0.04188890223059537,0.0,0.0,0.09075260694128978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640058124880541,0.0,0.08656614716755352,0.07947243690302014,0.047082701326921036,0.06948642395586603,0.06625868450778735,0.0,0.0,0.246088613095046,0.07325952670056654,0.08819000303072982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880603210861323,0.0,0.0,0.1110584640754232,0.0,0.0,0.0822837405576166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221084205063356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09105884956627,0.06752970157186883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847145870296739,0.05851584699961537,0.16189545598216365,0.0,0.5120753374739476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059931148274027,0.0,0.0,0.0902424509480604,0.0,0.0,0.0834882368129999,0.0,0.0,0.1940540375229821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061428489936765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117047355631289,0.15898395163595286,0.0,0.0,0.08822718124905853,0.1122757812099691,0.06300732708512881,0.0,0.0,0.09198952676759828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927144061427371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894448581655044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588163929870006,0.0829422598394785,0.08384352488740612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935912266947711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019426784730261,0.06377809953765648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616009403293778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15616079337072936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241014872648564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651155356389684,0.053083706809136336,0.0,0.0,0.09661512765981578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920438015506262,0.0,0.0,0.08092749047611149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835577025293565,0.09772821059158014,0.0657584750823537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924934420184773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206242386941022,0.0,0.08442609438629231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669887928635853
mentalhealth,ms-spooky,2020/03/07,"It feels like I’m losing myself 
I feel like I’m probably going to ramble on but to say the least I’m only diagnosed with clinical depression and generalized anxiety disorder but haven’t had a re-evaluation in years and can’t get one for a while for financial reasons. I’d just like help finding coping mechanisms other people have used who have felt the same way, I’ve tried everything but nothing seems to stop this spaced out feeling. I know there’s depersonalization/derealization but since I haven’t been diagnosed I don’t want to self label it. But this is how I’ve been feeling. I’ve always felt like I’m not me, hyper aware that I’m a real person but not really connecting my face and body to “me”, but lately it’s gotten a lot worse. I’ve had episodes where it’s worse some days than others. The other day I got so spaced out i barely even recognized my own name, I’m struggling to keep a grasp on myself and who I am. I really can’t remember a time where anything felt real, even when I was a child I never felt right or really in my body at all. I feel like I’m broken and I have no idea how to fix it. It’s scary. I don’t have a healthy support system in my life which doesn’t help either because I have no one to talk to. I’m in a relationship but my boyfriend has never fully understood what I’m feeling no matter how I describe it. I’m at a loss on what to do. I’m not on medication (and as previously stated I currently am not in a situation to afford it right now even though I desperately need it). I’ve tried everything from hobbies to attempting to make new friends and force myself to at least go outside  but nothing ever helps me feel grounded. If anyone can help me understand this feeling I’d be extremely grateful.",4.040477528089888,5.029733463483151,5.8405662921348345,78.55162471910116,71.1067415730337,9.179146067415733,28.00404494382023,9.490545024520769,2.440928,1387,49,276,31,25,479,176,356,0.138,0.721,0.141,-0.6,2,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,3,15,11,0,1,14,0,24,8,3,6,4,69,62,26,0,3,17,0,12,5,1,0,5,1,0,3,21,10,0,2,21,0,0,2,16,4,0,2,12,13,29,7,34,49,8,40,0,3,0,0,14,21,0,5,19,175,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296801748542035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708528793717705,0.0,0.0,0.061317334600309165,0.0,0.07216427902958975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053457144028771136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19481542018100764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311010637925725,0.0,0.0755302835748138,0.1780141143661338,0.0,0.0,0.10050434910495036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737621902827305,0.07932379184726727,0.0,0.0,0.15762652767316834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547237504167767,0.18794476306826047,0.3367980510425804,0.0,0.08015027085366637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06775178103632776,0.0,0.04581623465172981,0.0,0.09967647458567094,0.0,0.07013650338966597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351164198305672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899528809644367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077946012613034,0.0,0.0,0.048194054550790025,0.0,0.098922088345444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06194051288409366,0.2142130741353991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09810659605121544,0.0,0.07455387826735624,0.0,0.0,0.0585360926067907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883419760380194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650236195402524,0.13526926760287974,0.08469492933964727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16828855787963878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884677107473952,0.06669485883258901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607956316798761,0.07657058223458968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454842564056906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19962880448408812,0.16853610602901176,0.090163523956554,0.0,0.09415000127615583,0.09933964136217023,0.14977954073955274,0.0,0.06973739144258075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983286941564753,0.09148344637560143,0.0,0.0,0.07254096990226945,0.09857116889662967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07331569316301154,0.0,0.0916762871354042,0.0,0.0,0.09951354527454974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048471401765549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615841910278292,0.0,0.051134785416765034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907626112005035,0.0,0.0,0.09129202680995567,0.0,0.07573902851144733,0.0,0.0,0.05172389871864092,0.06960701898587665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787343379690708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056471739246964026
mentalhealth,KernelPanic411,2020/03/07,"What should I do? I was like 12 or 11 when a neighbour used to molest me sexually and used to threaten me.
I got beptized later when I became 13 and I told him to stop and my religion don't allow all these bad things.

He used to force me into doing shit. I am male and 22 now. No one knows about it. He is living normal life. Last year was so bad for me financially and mentally. My dad was not healthy, he was not getting any salary for 6 months. I was scared. He do not have gallbladder.

 I tried contacting some friends and asked them for work such as websites. No one helped me though. I found a friend lastly whom I found on Facebook who gave me small online work. I was studying in a uni and I thought that I should drop out. I was in severe depression and emotional as hell. I failed in 2 exams. I was good in academics throughout. Was in top 10. Everything messed up when I joined this new uni for higher studies. My roommate in hostel was pervert too used to fantasize about making playboy of our country. 

I can not sit in placements for companies this year. I am bipolar too and always think that I will make things work and do some stuff which end up failing, making me more depressed, everyday is a rollercoaster of emotions, one time I am manic and other time I am lying in my bed.

So my young brother who is now like 18. He is also shy. I looked at his phone, he searched for gay forums and apps and is part of some forums. I asked him about this. He did not tell me. This went for several months. I asked him several times that ""has anyone done something bad to him?"" He always denied. Today I told him about my past that a guy used to do bad shit to me. I was thinking that same guy was culprit. I was filled with resentment, fear and all that stuff. He told me that once a gardener tried to do bad shit to him, and my brother ran away as he was scared. My brother does not go outside anymore.

I can not tell it to my parents. They are old and are not much healthy. My career is ruined. I have no proof and I can not physically harm those perverts. This will raise many questions, and if went legal I can not win. I am really poor now atm. Now I am feeling so sad, I can not focus on study. I cry sometimes. I am coward I guess. I was always bullied, in school, in play ground, in everything. I was mocked because of religion. I live in area where we are minority. I am nerd wanted to break poverty of my family and make them proud. I wanted to freelance full time last year, but my procrastination, lack of expertise and depression ruined it. I try, give up, try again and procrastinate. If I get a job I will have to move away from my family making me more anxious. If this freelancing worked out it will be life saving. 

I am again in the beginning. I try to study, I get negative thoughts, I procrastinate. Yes I can not afford therapy. I will make it work somehow I think. I don't know how to feel safe in society. I am worried about my parents, my family all the time. 

I am reading ""feeling good new mood therapy book"". I have no friends, my career is ruined and I am depressed! This year I want to make myself stronger so that I can fight this bullshit. 

To the parents I beg you that always try to be in contact with your kids. Tell them when they are young that if someone touch them wrongly immediately tell you.

These perverts can ruin whole life of someone and can live normally in pride in society.

Sorry for my english. I am not native.",1.533622247428326,3.869328219971061,3.0109463370751364,90.10731167129505,82.28509406657021,5.992732819650332,22.941311065044786,7.276361111833896,0.9163588453866316,2684,94,555,39,74,876,297,691,0.19899999999999998,0.7340000000000001,0.067,-0.998,6,0,1,0,1,0,91.0,2,3,6,11,27,45,8,3,10,1,73,8,3,14,4,96,119,43,0,12,19,7,4,2,4,7,4,0,2,4,36,29,0,2,13,4,2,6,20,31,0,3,30,5,109,13,73,80,14,79,1,11,1,1,64,34,4,11,38,387,145,19,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044114155604599095,0.1836014903473748,0.0,0.0,0.037513007506636484,0.0,0.0,0.06231894679660066,0.05470727560052184,0.03857153587527183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15471101343833055,0.0,0.1036556710381508,0.0,0.2302956978932001,0.033627100103678066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605944108823883,0.0,0.0,0.19004864197477336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048273868063650666,0.05645131635174532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410281323174455,0.04885840407983382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915462416413458,0.0,0.15600944841664058,0.06207416774697316,0.08367682618339882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12096765413922735,0.1278573312044993,0.0,0.08646180807067362,0.05291776528699155,0.03135063469786277,0.09253689497444284,0.044119214807601656,0.0,0.060768710550800735,0.10924088883341332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03697486804292074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05474116829952192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060632730244971615,0.1348966146102261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689063445508162,0.05390010722301783,0.0,0.14613089360836662,0.0,0.046323367525372736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577540115676806,0.05592703513621925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0555917383694472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806180827291346,0.058629970237348686,0.040551450368907054,0.0,0.0,0.10655432193105624,0.0,0.0,0.10809685056288204,0.0,0.0,0.05788471479365355,0.058747226726768666,0.11214045401803277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837573016273344,0.05973659273344512,0.05265971260569224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061795639117285465,0.0,0.05517833369637918,0.0,0.035339090228186286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104563848699949,0.05582831159739085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186956840389802,0.16987332968057522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347954926734142,0.04246748474446027,0.05455801875735376,0.061750916381425235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04611907721512838,0.0,0.0,0.12629780358403672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19286099201312906,0.0,0.12616832390226848,0.0,0.07329623116872755,0.10603944890669133,0.05419776601579388,0.08758716461983017,0.16083112736664312,0.0,0.05228845851148501,0.1581329943532328,0.0,0.22471398867664247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382173552087828,0.0,0.0,0.09761041774106692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227405947624382,0.0,0.06158797246009376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007980816961072,0.056021116179083716,0.0,0.0,0.060312524431386134,0.0,0.1420936986580814
mentalhealth,mumblecrustjenna,2020/03/07,"Loneliness. (Semi rant) It turns out someone I thought was my friend isn't really my friend. I'm now just seen as their friends little sister. I was so happy this year cause I thought I gained confidence and almost all of it dropped faster than my sanity. Last year I had no friends, Was lonely, And at a very bad mental state. I found the hobby cosplaying which helped because I made what I thought were friends. Turns out they hate me. I have a few friends left but its only once every few months I see them.. I feel like I've been used. I could've bought a new outfit but I bought it from them, I offered them money, Let then borrow a cosplay, And offered them boba. I tried to impress them because I was scared of losing this friendship but, I'm tired of them ditching me. Cosplay, The thing that saved my life, Turned into so much pain on the end. I have no more motivation. I'm gonna try to make some more friends but as of now I want to sleep without rubbing my eyes raw. And I want to wake up and cosplay my favorite character, Not worrying about all stress. Sorry for the vent, I love you guys thank you for reading this. God bless you all, May your lives be better than mine. 😂😭",1.434647570003218,3.7864453598326406,2.263619246861925,95.20606292243325,82.84937238493724,5.0158352108142905,21.744608947537817,6.297961479604792,0.22864840682330234,927,30,198,8,26,289,147,239,0.12300000000000001,0.619,0.258,0.9886,0,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,4,8,4,6,22,1,2,8,0,13,7,3,5,3,34,37,14,0,2,7,1,2,1,7,2,3,0,0,1,11,8,0,0,6,1,4,0,5,7,0,0,15,5,41,15,23,18,9,20,1,2,3,1,25,8,0,3,11,123,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482964555936852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874098868066318,0.1276333444605161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258779519299172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075431425053256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358463873121473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272226118942734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820393278182735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052933264870200725,0.07478893956415752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147846991097207,0.5661703963756728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365731768915566,0.0,0.11144204170430172,0.0,0.1033574657976274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016998276321856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533447738094467,0.0,0.0,0.1137435315494243,0.1070503029400507,0.07394404396858212,0.05114513986073485,0.10492461399461796,0.0924411889157601,0.0,0.0,0.11711879857362195,0.0,0.0,0.09448476908294323,0.0990580671105476,0.06987987673859025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550061513764704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356075214974691,0.0,0.07695753153484272,0.0,0.0,0.10110806784448008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148902227369842,0.0,0.07961974068932512,0.11139513220992373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471606605555857,0.0,0.06706564440747025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481068672669601,0.0,0.08342257167884698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476334029839464,0.0,0.08870157904537365,0.0,0.0,0.11718934961627735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199194479622809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963824021299534,0.0,0.0,0.06954988009353044,0.0,0.0,0.2493311061117927,0.0,0.12032315242138834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215220181259575,0.34161058500351765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041659155887218,0.0,0.08637834604227118,0.12349507819654655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091524177841127,0.0,0.0,0.10631547764009404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134830939410324
mentalhealth,chewedupspitout369,2020/03/07,"I need an outlet for my anger The stress in my life and my relationship is destroying me and destroying my relationships with everyone close to me

I don't have any physical strength so working out is not an option.

Lately I've realized I get drunk and say really mean things to people I disagree with on reddit.

This probably isn't healthy.

I don't know what to do.

This is destroying my life",3.399350649350648,5.639740883116888,4.944155844155844,79.20766233766237,75.23376623376623,9.594805194805195,27.883116883116887,9.957137785484203,3.1188753246753254,316,13,60,10,7,106,50,77,0.28300000000000003,0.68,0.037000000000000005,-0.9655,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,1,6,4,1,3,0,8,3,0,0,0,13,12,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,7,1,0,3,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,0,1,12,1,9,12,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,41,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16723528184529246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349888535332216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284840095265146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515220993376156,0.0,0.27741054318349306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34740373179822703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678809744151931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18234792570722136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17049123698847554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651453335932568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15754382565624514,0.0,0.0,0.5280560374653246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955669149717987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817026328380192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337954075704714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903402589356113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mystickokichi,2020/03/07,"im scared and confused hello :) im 14 and i tried to overdose on prozac about 2 months ago now i think. after i realized it couldnt kill me, i was dissapointed and felt guilty and cried on my mom for hours. i never told anyone, and i dont know what to do. i think i have an eating disorder as well and things are really bad right now. i want to tell somebody and get help but ny parents will just get mad and dissapointed in me if i tell them and i dont know what to do :(( can someone give me advice on what to do and please do not be mean to me. im really fragile at the moment. thank you :)",-1.0961149110807114,0.9479459457364356,1.8221249430004567,95.51433652530784,93.41860465116278,4.895759233926128,15.34017327861377,6.522977012572876,-0.4891927952576376,453,10,110,6,17,158,79,129,0.11800000000000001,0.7390000000000001,0.14300000000000002,0.5061,1,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,1,1,0,5,7,2,2,2,0,13,2,0,0,1,25,25,13,1,3,4,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,10,1,0,7,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,3,2,18,2,15,19,0,14,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,2,8,71,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14088217947737666,0.12779884450536205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080767731132376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12037671755916418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836501400551284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16523239405297604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3379345490493433,0.0,0.0,0.1475228696741218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13842671680812108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15064673728881173,0.13830190802714099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663474584866433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14197934039949034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.467188083348866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950379061377098,0.0,0.1584651626215951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570444249292693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688512690415495,0.11507587331411855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111935211105984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16008477361777146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15825640455635154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18471919893045494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312119981349433,0.0,0.0,0.14434026737950525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12215557436217513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25202352210798873,0.13273323673942708,0.0,0.0,0.09578077009541958,0.1847578411573257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13776151683962234,0.0,0.09788260843915124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503575906063694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962699433708302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,findingsolutions1,2020/03/07,"NS sucks, life sucks. Been diagnosed with anxiety disorder, paranoia and schizophrenia, recently down PES in NS to PES E9. No one understands, everyone around me in NS is looking down on me, thinking I’m a siao person who hallucinates, either that or I CK to down PES, thinking it’s my fault to have such illness, thinking I’m a burden to everyone and the society and will never be employed, and hopes that I can just be warded in IMH for the rest of my life. Currently on MC for 1 month, and I really don’t want to continue NS and be judged by humans anymore. Should I try to get PES F, or continue MC until ORD... :((((",3.2011475409836048,4.9078491147541,5.1270163934426245,80.03396721311476,74.24590163934425,9.142295081967212,29.41311475409836,9.642632912329526,2.96656131147541,480,21,93,13,10,165,79,122,0.172,0.794,0.034,-0.9384,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,2,0,4,0,10,4,0,0,1,20,22,9,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,4,8,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,1,8,1,21,16,2,16,0,0,1,0,3,9,2,3,7,62,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16405513228191976,0.0,0.2126786802898579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909076757856745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21766418523636274,0.0,0.0,0.2457804802561409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4098360005460078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204227733937487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21299914531793288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029474672397909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18008560221164366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711734770360514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539854171193608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14531817146111126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872511452758896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738339169467215,0.0,0.21174539992472444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4122363946034959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559877709685146,0.0,0.0,0.2232520124027372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12648929903035802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LittleRedRiddim,2020/03/07,"what’s wrong with me? i want to die. i’ve been sitting in my car for hours and that’s all i’ve been able to think. i’m so sad. i thought i hated myself before, but this is worse and i can’t make it stop. i feel worthless. i’ve ruined every single good thing that has come my way and made everyone i have loved leave me. i’m always either too much of not enough. and how can that be anything other than my fault?? what the fuck is wrong with me???? :( i can’t stop fucking everything up. i want to go to sleep forever but that only makes me more of a piece of shit than i already am. my family has already lost a son and i couldn’t put them through losing a daughter. i feel so stuck.",-0.4011128775834685,1.6185079189189189,1.6782670906200323,98.53636724960256,88.05405405405406,4.563434022257551,16.813990461049286,5.900188976854957,-0.6287007949125591,524,12,126,4,17,174,93,148,0.34600000000000003,0.5870000000000001,0.067,-0.9939,0,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,1,2,4,14,4,0,4,0,13,5,2,4,1,26,32,10,1,3,4,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,8,0,2,4,0,0,4,4,12,0,0,6,2,21,2,15,24,7,11,0,5,0,3,4,2,3,0,3,82,31,0,0.14916373371512182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32921177869169393,0.0,0.1241161757085512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227490432737482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692735096345725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284913487359597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480840567987156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15412601090712222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567687903407262,0.14253233983617505,0.13405874573007845,0.0,0.1406182929142785,0.0,0.1508433312701756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27579893645449416,0.0,0.0,0.08477318734989614,0.1251114628148324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726830558050774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14689623096336116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579428564614204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16687606342180678,0.162829835837968,0.0,0.13462609341888498,0.1411423314694452,0.1991359010604372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965250727978802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344574106562008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995075168339891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15311442911812134,0.0,0.0,0.14927145797969893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24941512099140584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909775666091104,0.09557809759706397,0.0,0.11841934281906635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17596126968851442,0.11839922882276124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520105880699944,0.0,0.32617425340455003,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,c0okieL,2020/03/07,"been feeling awful about my appearance recently I’ve been feeling very self conscious about my appearance. I feel like it shouldn’t matter, but more and more recently I’ve been caring more and more. I’m still relatively young, (highschool) but I feel terrible about how I look. I feel like I hide in pictures with others, and any time I try and take a picture of myself I always feel like it’s terrible. I feel like it’s taken a toll on my mental health as I just feel somewhat embarrassed when out and about. I don’t know how to find a way to view myself more positively and to try and start feeling more confident in my appearance",5.539838709677419,6.283924758064518,6.15661290322581,78.52991935483874,67.54838709677419,9.748387096774195,30.822580645161292,9.827888789773867,2.888858064516129,506,19,96,11,8,165,65,124,0.113,0.657,0.23,0.929,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,1,3,1,5,1,0,2,0,32,24,13,0,1,3,0,9,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,9,0,0,12,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,4,11,16,5,14,19,7,15,0,0,2,0,1,4,0,4,11,63,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879293043304627,0.0,0.0,0.09708592414231297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455596744806218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6496820067978102,0.4079688596698641,0.0,0.0,0.13048573714657713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517538140599585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846057994767862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27899345154827576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198876668256788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14387476912696587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819288343574658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489363018975208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105066416398976,0.0,0.11401328639539687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734242872640518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324813001718523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938577816820605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11779708182920555,0.0,0.11332117890818615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dail_yyy,2020/03/07,"sometimes i think my mom likes me and then she comes home angry i was having a pretty good day and we’ve been kind of getting along lately and then she comes home and she’s visibly angry and she just takes it out on my every time. honestly she’s only nice to me when my doctors tell her that i might hurt myself because my mental health is really bad. i don’t know, i’m just so sick of crying and feeling like shit because she’s angry at me for things other people did.",1.2657575757575756,3.3639598686868686,3.0507979797979807,90.82286363636366,81.62626262626263,5.172121212121212,17.980808080808078,6.2581,-0.12860888888888855,373,8,77,3,10,124,70,99,0.23600000000000002,0.608,0.156,-0.9118,0,0,0,0,0,2,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,9,1,0,1,0,7,4,1,0,0,16,15,10,0,0,2,1,1,2,0,1,3,0,2,0,4,10,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,3,1,19,6,8,11,0,11,0,1,0,0,9,3,1,1,8,51,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15055017278476912,0.21982893198496614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106398346060737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19806056108710765,0.11628414842305974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845535209676332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15191779563765298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116945992505338,0.12881251978602626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420381610399596,0.0,0.0,0.15123432238223056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19165963982664544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3617285104644145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930241153790616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877636892995352,0.09909290640576812,0.0,0.20339598594153807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617937568477945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18170868786283725,0.1912789602462524,0.0,0.21117528575771974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13713283652195474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500329959963408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834386966774784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551032408728035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850842154159188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17832984345463984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355696484813991,0.0,0.1575976881930491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978904043663133,0.11553448820327447,0.0,0.0,0.10513941092137208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,glitterempress,2020/03/07,"I think I might have BPD. Who should I see to get help? In last year or so my mental health has been a roller coaster. I have never seen a psychologist or counselor of the sort, but am starting to feel I’m going to end up fucking up all of my relationships because of my mental health. I’ve read a good amount about BPD and the symptoms really hit home for me. Who should I see to help me and possibly diagnose me? Even if I don’t have any mental illnesses I want some sort of therapy/counseling for my intrusive thoughts. Would a psychologist, psychiatrist, or therapist be best? Help!",3.921758454106282,5.5564611565217445,5.195072463768118,80.57512077294687,72.21739130434783,9.285024154589372,28.42995169082125,9.725611199111238,2.6946618357487924,463,18,92,12,9,154,74,115,0.036000000000000004,0.787,0.177,0.9484,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,1,0,6,0,12,6,0,0,2,20,25,8,0,5,5,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,4,14,2,14,16,4,9,0,0,3,1,6,3,1,8,5,61,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065235174270118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022594914906906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15532809848512458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3728285914668843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15022774525675095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310935486087182,0.0,0.0,0.09775967166048956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748386573220354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683350746298906,0.07732948201766883,0.0,0.08411789191810252,0.12414435313533917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31465690636408905,0.0,0.0,0.2976253575433234,0.0,0.14846680050814595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064847551209212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44747992040040396,0.15701596313669433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415497668188655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16685982563076004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805075414978558,0.0,0.09481944467622846,0.0,0.0,0.15890810071999462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358907303415116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047627355162049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15383978995095418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718518310326763,0.0,0.09483928037557184,0.0,0.1175039631240096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730054589276147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514255489577364,0.0,0.0,0.0953140383054091
mentalhealth,honeymooonavenuee,2020/03/07,"I, a 22 year old, have an 84 year old father. He was diagnosed with prostate cancer last year & I'm continuing to live in fear. Hi everyone.

When I was born, my mom was 67 and my dad was 61. I was born to older parents and was very lucky to not have any health problems. I am continually grateful for that.

I've always considered my dad to be my best friend, as I have always been a daddy's girl and we naturally understand each other so well. Growing up, I was always much closer to him as he had retired a little early to take care of me & pick me up from school. I am very close to my mom as well, but my dad and I have a special kind of bond where we share several inside jokes, sharing similar political/moral values, can hold a conversation for hours, etc.

I have always been scared of losing my parents, especially my dad.  I had come to realize at an early age that most of my friends' parents had been a lot younger than mine. Since I was around 6, I was always worried that I would lose my dad at an early age. I would obsess over these thoughts, even wishing that I would die first so I wouldn't have to face this reality. Eventually, however, I was able to keep these thoughts away by spending as much time with them as possible & living my life to the fullest.

This month marks 1 year since he was diagnosed with prostate cancer. Although the prognosis for prostate cancer is very good, and he is making great progress, my fears of losing have been slipping into my mind again. Almost every part of my day involves me wondering how much time I have left with him, and that the days are going by too quickly. I can't help but reminisce about how much younger he used to look before being diagnosed. I can see how tired he is from the frequent visits and chemo sessions. I can't even begin to imagine the toll it takes on him, but he continues to be strong for me. He always pushes the importance of education and my career, telling me that there is no rush to get into a relationship if I am not ready. He has seen me graduate university (although he wasn't able to physically attend because of mobility issues), but I can't help but worry if he will see me finish grad school, get married and have children.

I've tried expressing these fears to my mom but all she says is that it is life & that she could die too. I am aware of this and I know that life is so unpredictable, that anyone's life could be cut short at any moment. I worry for her as well. She hasn't given me too much emotional support on this, and she just tells me not to cry in front of my dad because it will worry him. She is emotionally supportive with everything else, but not when it comes to this. She just saw me crying 10 minutes ago but she hasn't said anything. I am just so sad all the time, and I am finding it hard to hide it. I am holding in tears everyday single day, whether I am at work, on the bus, etc. I have suicidal ideation from time to time as well, but I am not not actually suicidal (nor do I have a plan). I don't know if I should seek help, but I just can't go any day without feeling sad and waiting for bedtime to come.

Thank you in advance for reading/commenting. Any help or support is greatly appreciated.",5.930206938004464,5.490698077279756,6.6114386913961924,79.6723289112142,66.68160741885626,9.785488579769881,32.191696719903824,9.2995712137729,2.5971425725571016,2524,92,521,42,36,833,287,647,0.156,0.708,0.136,-0.9679,4,0,0,0,0,0,78.0,2,1,1,10,29,34,1,5,19,0,73,16,4,6,2,90,108,47,4,12,26,13,2,0,2,7,12,2,0,2,25,28,0,4,10,1,1,12,18,12,4,1,25,9,80,22,77,70,15,76,0,5,5,3,60,24,0,9,40,354,105,7,0.1104778986724856,0.0,0.05390524623793471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04896599565909518,0.0,0.055313828510547385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27577938568634075,0.23940551410891925,0.0,0.15025751909172302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03862435774544614,0.0,0.04545694864021401,0.049174376246602064,0.0,0.0,0.05189881125641852,0.0,0.0,0.0673463016119649,0.0,0.04700427734428005,0.0,0.05796986935603837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0563197903312865,0.0,0.0,0.14275039098699432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820761242154712,0.0,0.12135478404925852,0.14249821007046426,0.0,0.0,0.16819911241661295,0.11465861661128456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04614505406326805,0.12427276608791267,0.0,0.0,0.12321206053344876,0.07296961013129913,0.0,0.04654119725213385,0.052783183303948336,0.04964520583540028,0.0,0.0,0.1864775260360069,0.02793047252912321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05048739895538129,0.04698622208657778,0.0,0.0,0.08535495046208556,0.0,0.05772014224926195,0.0,0.06278713577974758,0.04633180990904045,0.0,0.12180227330765958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049483248569879686,0.0,0.0,0.058716420054702165,0.0,0.0,0.14810201341202048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054399238057202856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057655111577444226,0.0,0.04909891624646226,0.0,0.057522865335153224,0.06071576386374351,0.04502711635339418,0.0,0.0,0.06001728008081221,0.0,0.15606761410399508,0.0,0.05536393902759886,0.09755400857673699,0.0,0.04638680515755245,0.18539476419369733,0.0,0.046962179362152016,0.0,0.0,0.03687242761941334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05577559197524128,0.19408556952737532,0.044091202349871766,0.0,0.2030349181855507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592797027387942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840089484469355,0.059818399134834624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06227361557196201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052856214331724334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059305958987429935,0.0,0.0,0.0525448904108835,0.043928229641261536,0.05530382479820426,0.11180953159007008,0.0880365816202114,0.0,0.0,0.06240428960814269,0.0,0.09138845942898402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12084488985915555,0.18805351528680836,0.0,0.0,0.0830656306575766,0.0,0.09656255295024893,0.05085660296191288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08770711104492054,0.16105137788913254,0.06348904628429636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03750362061944383,0.0,0.0,0.05750569436520826,0.0,0.04770871649244742,0.0,0.13673375487951106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986657975376248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352206561140168,0.053248375953634144,0.05990428421933632,0.040214613009496115,0.22439133765345612,0.0,0.11772049417675333,0.0,0.0,0.14228828916978348
mentalhealth,Cappn_Cappn,2020/03/07,Social Problems I dont really know what i feel but when i go to places with lots of people i get angry or anxious and inwant to cry i like being alone but i also want friends but i also would rather be alone and i dont know how to socialize i dont like being around strangers but i like being with my family i feel like im socialy awkward or social anxiety or something please help,1.3676851851851843,3.417175197530866,3.509367283950617,87.93590277777781,80.9753086419753,6.025308641975308,21.23611111111111,7.1686216300943375,0.7116037037037031,305,9,62,4,8,104,47,81,0.226,0.515,0.259,0.6369,0,2,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,0,0,8,0,0,1,0,22,15,13,0,4,8,0,2,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,2,12,5,7,10,1,4,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,4,5,43,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960580276252425,0.0,0.22859694880473386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933857643124717,0.16146655076111502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723511425618578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569983291359908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5025272774852706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473862453739413,0.0,0.14453612367753468,0.10210690238986338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104248564324694,0.0,0.07467333044692773,0.0,0.08122856866239203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580079116586497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15438542184463513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709761347280551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793071720984117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151121606297527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908741581822007,0.0,0.14932803865326644,0.15689065698280855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676160193513578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156253915530416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4370874828512257,0.0,0.11003199883285428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843019032528608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153106604247536,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soulfulmistgod,2020/03/07,"is there any way I can obtain a human brain or a brain that looks like a human brain so I can cut it apart? Sounds weird I know but I have a chronic neurological condition that has been destroying my life and as a means of stress relief I'm an artist and I often draw pictures of brains being physically tortured, cut into pieces etc. so I was wondering if I could obtain a brain specimen from a lab or biology class somewhere so I could hack it open, throw it to the ground, cut it into tiny pieces etc as a means of stress relief and acting like it's my brain",3.942195652173911,4.842288208695656,5.202336956521741,83.3678532608696,71.26086956521739,8.184782608695654,23.94021739130435,8.472884824447931,1.3025000000000002,444,11,93,7,8,148,69,115,0.212,0.682,0.107,-0.9197,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,5,12,5,2,10,0,10,9,6,0,0,17,16,12,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,2,7,6,0,0,4,1,0,2,0,8,0,0,2,2,10,4,9,11,4,8,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,5,2,62,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830098110378769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8176034938938164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949212866943509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722741577072248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708488354946271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621959975258614,0.11927163437142355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250561713131208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659337051546156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796548917517149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689117893103744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237655841691054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashminko91,2020/03/07,"In need of advice Hi, first time poster here - kind of new to reddit. 

I’m 28f. I’ve been having a rough time lately with my anxiety and depression especially related to work.

Our floor changed around in august 2019 and all managers were promoted allowing for them to pick new team leaders. They happened to pick the popular kids at work who all hang out together. Since then work has been hell.
On Friday I raised an issue to my team leader which involved her and I cc’d in our operations manager (my old team leader, her friend and now also her reporting boss). My new team leader took it personally and took it out on me all day. But she did it by being overly nice to everyone around me, telling her friends what I did (which wasn’t personal at all, I was asking do I do this or do you what is procedure) and completely ignoring me all day. 
About an hour before I finished work I found out that my cat had been hurt and taken to the vet so I got a bit upset (I am a cryer, even if I’m angry. Which doesn’t help these situations). My team leader was told by someone else what happened, then someone else told her what happened and her response was “I can see she’s upset, I know and I don’t care”.

I’m in need of what to do next for two things.
1. It’s currently Saturday, we go back on Monday. I can’t stop having panic attacks over this and feeling extremely depressed that I have to go, that this is my life. Working 40 hours a week with people like this. I don’t know how to bring up my anxiety and depression because when someone has before they made jokes and said they were playing the victim. All management are friends and try and ignore stuff like this. Does anyone know how to stop feeling so horrible? Or stop feeling anxious about walking into this office.

2. How do I stop crying no matter the emotion. I’m upset but I’m also very angry and frustrated and I don’t know how to be a bitch back. I know that sounds silly but I’m a timid person who crys hahaha. Suggestions.

Sorry if this is not the right place to post this, as I said, first time poster. Please let me know.

Thank you in advanced to anyone who even reads this let alone responds ❤️",2.2988942713907505,4.428177099307163,3.7079952684053414,87.28835802399595,78.2378752886836,6.810995324733849,23.26305413169605,7.8500785054351265,1.2143055145609196,1696,55,341,28,41,557,217,433,0.149,0.759,0.09300000000000001,-0.9729,1,1,0,0,0,0,46.0,3,2,4,14,19,29,5,5,13,0,37,1,0,9,6,67,74,35,0,4,8,0,4,2,3,0,1,3,0,4,31,25,0,6,10,8,0,8,8,16,0,3,22,8,48,13,45,48,7,62,1,4,1,0,43,22,2,4,33,225,79,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445305355892771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891099355551111,0.0,0.12185997791469327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165719540772792,0.08607424732741542,0.0,0.1065491664858342,0.0,0.0,0.13565245113115176,0.07122838622647339,0.08667836675480252,0.0,0.11717249391287315,0.0,0.046445382664676654,0.0,0.12966601555704838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318093943364177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768189643442068,0.0,0.08060007303820804,0.0,0.07988491064380425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836923371951822,0.09827390275843084,0.0,0.19686982837218414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667533828393166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729576192020062,0.08570472375762214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064699573163607,0.0,0.0,0.07280385375686634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557351660628346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296162083169761,0.0,0.08353960004315303,0.17659514665160625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08660230711737532,0.0,0.06093697667316834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20212659379534312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05106928310602498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15006575670873942,0.0,0.08156414009148097,0.0,0.0,0.07952370525758104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934129799297543,0.2512357904383018,0.0,0.08594687072546013,0.0,0.0,0.15582110789107534,0.05381602170515725,0.07444623824004218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209385372481371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112989459001549,0.0,0.22075749505924894,0.08103009099306938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799497346110094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939383048523653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05282131002346206,0.19958136881546912,0.0796034749697179,0.08363493955152414,0.0,0.0,0.07297000522682186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621171065676402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506677649337163,0.1449503526574296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060714436041344765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630260588587442,0.08564197998764059,0.0,0.0,0.19366939568043276,0.0,0.0,0.08528968993422194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547966589797159,0.0,0.0,0.08722057208446511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659437289806006,0.07014652116165868,0.0,0.0,0.05061797618608508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328291583700466,0.0,0.0,0.14560770751373267,0.16930221388083966,0.0517287503333802,0.0,0.07442762614433229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06286563049542641,0.0,0.0,0.06111589843925407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773401130027453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idgrovi,2020/03/07,Walk in Clinics I really feel like I need someone to talk to however because it is Saturday I’m not sure of what places would be open. I live in Toronto ontario so skylark would be the best option if it was a weekday however it’s not. It’s not urgent but it would be very helpful and conscientious to get some things off my chest!,1.0366176470588258,3.4595279558823537,3.169117647058826,87.48102941176472,85.61764705882355,6.341176470588236,26.14705882352941,7.645422480735847,1.7091411764705886,263,12,53,5,8,89,50,68,0.022000000000000002,0.828,0.15,0.8252,2,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,0,8,2,1,0,1,15,12,4,0,5,5,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,4,3,7,5,2,7,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,3,2,37,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163226796588827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810023964843191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538981203181766,0.19129106233064785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989593626511174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794769470555807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308162436053353,0.0,0.2364410210099902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985440358439971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797569848967544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17153684006428618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268760512567457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523649383888624,0.0,0.0,0.21521901864771148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17789088233625208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22093381284829952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5706368040234385,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dudewheresmymania,2020/03/07,"I think I’m headed for a full blown psychotic episode. What should I do? I’ve never had this happen before, though I had a transient psychotic-like episode a few months ago (and was never really the same since). Things have been going steeply downhill over the past month. I’m beginning to the lose the ability to think clearly, I’m weirdly terrified of people, my weird and paranoid thoughts are losing their hypothetical/“what-if” quality, I can’t engage in University because it doesn’t feel real anymore. Nothing feels real. 
 

What do I do? I feel so confused and scared right now,  but I know once I get into another weird thought, I’ll become so absorbed by it I’ll fail to realize I’m being abnormal. Maybe I should go to the hospital, but that doesn’t feel real either and I think they will harm me. Fuck.",3.5852747252747212,5.817158333333335,4.7159706959706975,81.09807692307693,74.64102564102564,7.790476190476189,28.45054945054945,8.634040054169528,2.3928934065934064,644,27,117,13,14,211,102,156,0.207,0.759,0.034,-0.9754,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,3,4,11,1,2,8,0,16,2,1,0,3,29,36,9,0,2,3,0,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,11,0,0,2,5,10,0,0,6,4,14,1,10,26,4,15,0,3,0,1,2,5,1,1,8,71,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494857787950317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780416961888626,0.0,0.0,0.13979001581381453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592518643390537,0.15567431518037772,0.11994277925666245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28508541693408823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031112169002687,0.07364344982647471,0.0,0.16021655884269825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464651495790785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144661045592773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746547627111669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153863794728547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14160878160773144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22501872805646075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174271979681453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352506383685444,0.0,0.0,0.15011304553199872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455800854814326,0.09772082069421548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4813147771317788,0.09029972572417512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203752575624329,0.0,0.0,0.14112108141212285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165998759603414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364459481575513,0.2709558477705141,0.1384880984340038,0.2238059013703918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,running_albatross,2020/03/07,"How to deal with the effects of medication? My medication was recently switched around and I don’t think I can handle the effects of it. 

I now have the shortest temper in the history of mankind. I am so irritable that whenever someone says something that I disagree with even slightly, I become so enraged that it’s hard for me to not compulsively attack something or someone. I can’t even hold a normal conversation anymore. If I try to hold my anger in it just gets worse and I start to cry. 

I strongly believe that my self image, combined with all of the terrible things that have been happening to me lately as well as my medication change is to blame. I am in a constant state of agitation that I can’t control. I’ve already mindlessly started attacking four people in the past week. 

I know that side effects like this are temporary, but does anyone have any suggestions as to what I should do in the meantime?",6.3477115987460815,7.132245160919544,6.990585161964475,73.11747648902823,65.7816091954023,10.00543364681296,37.657262277951936,10.018931242160765,3.9573287356321836,734,38,129,16,11,242,106,174,0.141,0.82,0.04,-0.9171,0,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,5,9,9,5,0,9,0,15,3,0,5,1,23,21,11,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,1,3,1,0,1,13,6,0,3,5,0,0,0,4,6,1,1,2,2,20,3,25,18,1,16,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,2,9,98,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15790838326527654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730919418502866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141911333123671,0.10005502954775387,0.0,0.0,0.127384478488221,0.0,0.3255813943117366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15803667716717387,0.0,0.16121854524535115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15137504976092328,0.0,0.0,0.15463436257531313,0.1604926942915385,0.0,0.0,0.1571826330916975,0.0,0.14752418757711486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522299633366366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18902518835115156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07476099118996178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653802922846685,0.0,0.12818460129248094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864101699034133,0.0,0.16141687398589266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990876430569598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4324580845077908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020226744486716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659993000477408,0.0992037368185553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14128859528923585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137945216773254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14927881307800694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24248707892523466,0.22032233586269206,0.0,0.0,0.20256610396468808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506565410100293,0.0916892033881774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715179975176727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147818087340942,0.0,0.1286591765082406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582556126472135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Julz513,2020/03/07,"Would you consider this negligence? Today, my daughter's (7) psychiatrist refused to refill her ritalin until our appointment, which is next Wednesday Mar. 11, 2020. She will now have to go without it for 5 days. I am livid and consider this negligence on the part of the psychiatrist. I don't understand not doing a partial 5 day fill. My daughter has severe ADHD and has been medicated for 2 years.",5.235388127853881,7.461508178082192,6.6125342465753425,69.32418949771693,69.95890410958904,10.346118721461188,34.08447488584475,10.504223727775694,4.368170776255708,319,16,51,10,6,108,60,73,0.11800000000000001,0.882,0.0,-0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,10,2,0,0,0,7,12,3,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,8,0,8,9,1,11,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,8,38,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3490227763733731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37458770971548905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650497180259385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925628799681764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088599857252295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31449148897638063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3280866462698313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752797643972395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3023325884193275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799500033674514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20630270971328996,0.0,0.0,0.1870179433590368
mentalhealth,Spray55BT,2020/03/07,"Help with something I can’t explain fully I’m really not sure what to say, I’m 14 so mind my explaining of things. The past while now I’ve had violent outbursts, the feeling I’m out of my body, If I’m in places with lots of different sounds I feel fuzzy and confused like I’m not there. Sometimes I look in the mirror and convince myself I’m there. Last month for the first time I climbed to the top of a building and threatened to throw myself off although I had no intent to actually do it. I was not attention seeking as I told no one about this. I feel as though if I go to get “diagnosed” they will tell me I have nothing wrong with me. I have trouble keeping stable relationships with people. Please someone help or give tips of what to do, if you actually took the time to read this, thank you.",2.9997045028142573,4.4769480792682925,4.223902439024393,87.24867729831148,74.3048780487805,7.241275797373358,27.24953095684803,7.882392219407189,1.5423410881801132,631,24,133,9,13,207,101,164,0.11,0.753,0.13699999999999998,0.3795,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,1,3,6,8,1,1,7,0,9,2,1,1,1,27,28,13,0,3,7,0,3,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,6,8,0,1,6,1,0,4,6,4,0,2,5,6,20,4,24,22,1,18,0,0,1,0,12,6,0,6,9,88,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.31895643886975417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815271881278769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587188836455805,0.0,0.17074326445974378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24789620701804865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900834444321444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538227866365085,0.15677116230203236,0.09287760762071644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21907928302021085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14525873241735812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321234654286707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798406963307073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723497447996194,0.0,0.0,0.1389372142444049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501162163095787,0.0,0.1304434528035248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15680970570811353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074031075789646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600667010242705,0.11329760302395073,0.0,0.17074326445974378,0.17939044253222478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16346819372580776,0.0,0.10469357917370443,0.0,0.0,0.1754561828629083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299612994103111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846859850026333,0.12581175541570874,0.16163048396129065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15402515662512914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14283975200316,0.15045883384101394,0.0,0.0,0.10857162325696854,0.0,0.16056321967470294,0.0,0.1905876609480557,0.0,0.0,0.15615860564411227,0.18157004257209214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17867845524464082,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MusicLuver941,2020/03/07,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me... I feel like I’m always such an angry, pessimistic person now. I never used to be but then I went through a really hard time, lost a bunch of friends, etc. I feel like my problem is I hate seeing people happy, maybe because I’m so unhappy? I also overthink small things way too much which puts me in a bad mood, like if a couple of my mates walk off without waiting for me to tie my shoe. All this overthinking and sourness puts me in a bad mood and I distance myself, which makes me even more upset. I hate it being like this and just want to be as happy :(",1.6029765395894415,3.2920321129032284,3.175718475073314,92.37221407624635,78.6774193548387,5.476832844574782,20.950146627565985,6.1124844417494595,0.09600967741935527,458,12,100,3,11,151,85,124,0.294,0.536,0.17,-0.9678,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,7,17,2,1,6,0,5,1,1,2,2,18,19,9,0,3,4,0,3,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,7,4,0,1,3,0,0,4,3,8,0,0,2,5,18,7,13,14,5,13,0,1,1,0,3,4,0,1,8,68,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499888637465635,0.1300601899527032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610201227156497,0.0952834755048702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17295104757063046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17432395054723654,0.1032394933816279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806732850169433,0.22333192383597295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076262744810658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327840415317005,0.14002063335789375,0.3086421844448427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590240088020917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054553934451548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706278755219053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433633235340964,0.0,0.15703168574412976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149038458861961,0.0,0.12055382101280775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836379659292747,0.13648149988739472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14956497039957,0.0,0.3142640052540682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013445488133198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245566759801344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384362055651754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114404000114196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499931578928107,0.0,0.0,0.09219409166193912,0.12406945430788804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14489842732264654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15067465337846594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17089748823349452,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dylan03x,2020/03/07,"In Need Of Help I'm not really sure how to word this in a short reddit post, but I desperately need help. I really need support or someone to speak to right now, but I currently have no one. I've felt so low recently and I'm really lost. Any help would be much appreciated.",1.95315789473684,3.679050631578949,4.796350877192981,80.97978947368422,77.77192982456141,9.472280701754386,21.92631578947368,9.888512548439397,2.0763431578947382,214,6,47,7,5,77,41,57,0.205,0.5539999999999999,0.24100000000000002,0.5539,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,13,11,6,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,2,3,2,6,7,1,9,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,1,3,25,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406703879010896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20341172747321715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42600101426068604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23126214844914106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573604361790966,0.4712580753825722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355681058184264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20289623785983354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4071546181796208,0.0,0.20917889320335195,0.0,0.0,0.18092097046087527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17950202803650786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404078300170591,0.19966857671921096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504940150169816,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ertun669,2020/03/07,"Trying to piece together last few days I'm not exactly sure how to begin this, but I figured this would be a good forum to post this, as I know no other place to. I apologize if this isn't on-topic.

For the most part, my life has been normal; some personal moments of depersonalization which has happened since childhood, but this has never truly affected my day-to-day actions. For the past week, I've noticed reality has gotten somewhat stranger:

>mental perspective of reality has begun to shift between the mundane to that of a first-person game, or a movie-like experience that gives me great fear

>sometimes lose control of bodily functions (eyes darting around at random, walking around to different places without an intention of going anywhere)

>low-pitched moans, gurgles, and voices which speak no language have begun to resonate in my body, causing tremors and goosebumps 

>starting to alienate friends, who say I'm being irritable despite acting entirely normal 

>my reading interests have moved entirely to conspiracies and the occult, which has shocked me considering I only really read normal things before

>every time I look in a mirror, I'm appearing as something different from what I'm accustomed to, and my eyes are bulging out 

>getting no pleasure from anything at all 

 I don't think I'm schizophrenic, as I don't currently have delusions, or feel I share some greater importance in things; the voices I mentioned before happen only once a day, and aren't affecting me in a truly negative way. It's more that reality has become scary, and even if I know something with myself is off, there's something more sinister with this all.

Sorry if this turned into a rant, I just need an outside perspective on what is happening.",15.701189710610931,10.189275983922835,13.840607717041802,51.22477009646306,52.82636655948553,16.9416077170418,54.572668810289386,13.816669648895859,7.328424823151122,1425,73,211,35,10,456,189,311,0.157,0.742,0.10099999999999999,-0.9576,3,0,3,2,0,0,51.0,0,0,0,2,6,10,0,1,14,0,21,6,4,6,5,49,41,17,0,8,10,0,1,0,1,1,2,4,0,1,20,12,0,1,5,3,0,6,11,3,0,0,2,8,19,7,39,36,12,35,0,1,3,0,10,14,0,11,13,148,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630283439432403,0.18672120221902772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158257218837054,0.17848106768343702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649200387942775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773507139224668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762574679872788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27054168379263605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21914320638095225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692686637286599,0.0,0.0883613475852867,0.0,0.0,0.10258745233369224,0.0,0.11801304699036645,0.053027733214448085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920625481591413,0.0,0.0,0.08102583185652233,0.0,0.05479263376411518,0.1006052428587483,0.05960263439789895,0.08796381273669218,0.0,0.11562458256188013,0.0,0.0,0.2782207050384546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152726408305806,0.08548677115698812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740760095939369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806822462457252,0.11732781683479702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10568889878978092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146506967065062,0.0,0.07776316405241078,0.08088573292463752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30826443192087893,0.0,0.11940039191007835,0.0,0.11168799324897792,0.0,0.159523671106632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356893827449177,0.10011464291501164,0.0,0.18314485689960694,0.21914320638095225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044084709319352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20980589909490785,0.0,0.06718533436800057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340046662550868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675332722041322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24221270077141102,0.10372363037645138,0.11739849378769435,0.07423075972440507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884304014263844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13934800718377074,0.06719938916548815,0.0,0.0,0.06115320456264602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712029482032602,0.11407341558103405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324455136255843,0.08412405331504483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109534205795204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449988481897728,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,madboredwastaken,2020/03/07,"tonight my adhd brain finally decided to think about this and i need help (i can't remember much of my younger days, even though I'm only 16 btw)as a kid, I was bullied and left out and I would never get included. my mom helped a little but I felt as though she could maybe help a little more. she wasn't much there for me as a kid, and I can't blame her for that. my grandpa is the most un emotionally expressive people I have ever met, and it rubbed onto her. she remembers getting hugged once by my grandma and that's it. but anyways, I never got to experience having friends properly, because id much rather want to be home alone. however, I want to change that. other than that, as a kid I would often get into fits of rage and bully people but without knowing I was bullying them. I once threw a kid across the pavement at recess, and just laughed. is there something wrong with me? idk what to do, and I'm terrified of being an egotistical jerk, because I never want to be who the popular kids were/are. how do I move forward? what can I do to get over these things, when little things nowadays are ticking me off? I used to be able to calm myself down and release the anger some other way, but now I'm losing that control to dissipate the anger. sometimes I get an incredible urge to break something, to punch something, and I can't tell if its influences, me, or something else. I'm scared of my anger, and I don't want to let it out because I don't want to hurt someone or myself. I used to smoke weed and that helped a lot, however now spurts of tunnel vision that occur when I'm anxious, and it's annoying the fuck out of me. I really need help with all of this, and I'm begging that unlike most of my posts, a few people could reply to give me some options. I have ADHD and OCD (not the organizational version, the kind that makes my brain run like a v8) even a week ago, i was doing laundry and had a conversation with myself in my own head. it went something like this M1=me M2=another version of me. M2:you need more boxers. M1: yea, socks too. wait what the fuck, who are you? M2: i dont know... i sound like you though. M1:so youre me? M2:i think so. M1well do you mind? i wanna watch this show and u scared the shit out of me. M2: yeah, i got u.

so that's my post, I'm begging yall, i need help but i cant get it anywhere else, because my friends aren't real friends, my mom will just reassure me and trick me into thinking nothings wrong and im fed up with this.oh, i forgot, I don't know if i already said this, but i have alot of trouble expressing myself, but just a little bit better than my mom.

thank you so very much if you read through all of this, but i understand if you dont, its a lot and frankly I don't think many people will care.

PS i didnt have time to check for spelling/grammar so sorry.",1.8730666799826885,3.5195391443124,3.5188714670927834,90.40408635440596,77.76061120543294,6.385312427178002,23.77312826658677,7.208032530483347,0.8141115283464826,2192,72,483,26,51,729,260,589,0.133,0.713,0.154,0.8469,2,1,6,0,0,0,87.0,0,8,1,4,25,32,10,2,26,2,43,8,4,6,6,103,91,48,0,19,20,4,2,3,3,4,0,2,1,5,34,31,1,3,12,2,1,5,18,17,0,0,15,5,79,15,60,65,20,43,0,2,1,3,43,21,3,15,18,321,113,2,0.0634020565217265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15239390210451165,0.0,0.05620209764532297,0.0,0.0,0.06566540949671358,0.06996574596373513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648258439017579,0.0,0.0716262771916575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545972207161269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056073966679994564,0.06921862473305465,0.0,0.0,0.14155532679452687,0.0,0.0,0.06464262214946187,0.0,0.06707096898730301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111079757540903,0.10124276612061037,0.0,0.0,0.040889081335244964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861347609917164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059285652994081,0.07131877990343627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837529207471282,0.057350789960140286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062019377179053176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06087591703104226,0.06945385385151201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695281477925373,0.11722835921441666,0.198749746255332,0.06082102987362871,0.0,0.0,0.1014168329770275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506880148504074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549823721711222,0.0,0.06359743217899927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787321281903128,0.0,0.06848510089098807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602348529605667,0.104532336471953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688865199227695,0.06483289841421877,0.0,0.0929251267648154,0.25418206781063263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093068362983733,0.0,0.10780432235154967,0.0,0.0,0.042321365053289824,0.06427973396676395,0.06369588759167863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401800319230204,0.22276716695537188,0.0,0.06738635223835386,0.18643122671036627,0.18804728618527627,0.14669872380707474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06083598319551696,0.0,0.0,0.13504224195272213,0.0,0.04822012099085996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17582001171502198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144328840127608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634192140186524,0.07216542079837089,0.04061698091026045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364434109370575,0.0,0.06030987467701456,0.0,0.1269530383128717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06508129990751811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05372035674340879,0.24405000327325166,0.06270625508637494,0.07097341147325183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05541619195875088,0.058372095310267526,0.0,0.0,0.08424301822574216,0.16250191102514108,0.18687659586831776,0.0,0.0369702490236511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600377683273387,0.0,0.10951804029511314,0.0,0.05231333663093836,0.18698087813577824,0.05032560134413235,0.050857305388634234,0.0,0.0,0.058774341593663564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611173199792812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007800371833008,0.13864039156986271,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Overthinking36587,2020/03/07,"Anyone know how to fix the feeling that people are talking shit behind your back? Every day I go to school and talk to the same group of people, I've gotten to know these people of the course of the school year and some people I talk too I've known for upwards of 3 years.

Yet I can't shake the feeling that they all hate me, and talk about me when I'm not there.

I've had the habit of deleting discord messages I send to people just so they can't screen shot it and send it other people laughing at my stupidity or weakness

I'm in a group chat with some of my closest friends but there very much could be a second group chat with the same people in it that they use just to talk about me.

I just want this to stop, it's starting to hinder how I talk to people :/",6.139444444444441,4.515321679012344,6.219845679012347,86.53680555555556,66.77777777777777,8.346913580246914,28.274691358024693,5.148860815047168,0.9460469135802472,600,13,135,1,8,191,87,162,0.102,0.8390000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.8356,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,3,0,14,7,3,1,9,0,6,2,1,3,1,28,18,10,0,2,6,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,10,6,0,1,5,2,0,4,3,5,0,1,2,3,15,2,24,14,6,16,0,0,1,0,19,4,1,3,8,90,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280151739370198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09105712050858793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454816313470966,0.0,0.0,0.07637064218311869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977335491748414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975269710250028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149044576874832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730040858712336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691452742709285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016028410798344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705179990547204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6567761742177199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23969327686305386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155569422796192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381777935911415,0.0,0.0,0.0990038246482718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5710856134011002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227624092846782,0.0,0.09770831192049073,0.06984676237704618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525162739049169
mentalhealth,D_990,2020/03/07,"so i’m not sure if this is the right place to post this but i’m not sure where to go so just to start off i want to say I DO NOT HAVE DIAGNOSED OCD. i hate when people who aren’t diagnosed say that they do!! ok but anywho i have this thing i do that i think may possibly be ocd but before i make assumptions i wanted to maybe see if anyone possibly does that same thing or whatever

ok so basically some of the time when i touch something (anything with any part of my body) i have to touch it with the other side of me. like if i touched a wall with my right arm i’d have to touch it with my left. it would be (i’m not sure how to phrase it, but like mentally painful if that makes sense. kind of like an itch that needs to be scratched but for your brain.) it only happens maybe 15-25% of the time depending on the day. or when i’m consciously thinking about it. also super small detail but i normally check my phone to make sure my data’s off about 5-8 times per night like in a row, like i’m laying there and i check it then lay back down then 15 seconds later check again and so on. but it’s mostly the symmetry thing i talked about before. it’s this pattern thing in my brain, things need to be “left, right, right, left” or vice versa if that makes any sense.


there’s a little bit of ocd in my genes (my aunt) and i’ve had this quirk for as long as i can remember, also when i was like 6 i had a tic for like 2-3 months where i’d make clicking noises every time i talked but my parents just told me to stop and i eventually did.


anyways any help is appreciated (even if it’s just letting me know i’m over exaggerating lol) what should i do???",1.8687167070217896,3.052998361581924,3.4073809523809544,93.15165254237287,76.68361581920905,6.865052461662632,20.834947538337367,7.447530270364453,0.3308913640032283,1276,29,308,16,28,422,169,354,0.067,0.81,0.124,0.9698,2,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,1,1,25,17,1,0,11,3,24,8,5,7,4,60,48,36,0,13,24,2,5,7,0,3,4,2,0,0,29,8,0,1,5,0,3,1,5,2,0,1,5,9,34,15,39,35,5,44,0,0,2,0,12,23,0,13,26,191,63,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13398680461601606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17090595768402864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585761732286326,0.0,0.06893821032682844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441642414897601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425696556743321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914586435217809,0.09305314618220548,0.0,0.1870372059808837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054026787272868734,0.0,0.0,0.17005608068618974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733104968196351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0553314122612266,0.0,0.07058253888585046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04761024333663892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408036910886948,0.0,0.0,0.08270869697895185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05615141389732625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723690233726941,0.04603956297772623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730594992331886,0.08566377860608207,0.0,0.2864914971966461,0.08396276009230054,0.0,0.07413665082905402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795963264722016,0.0,0.16832288995966824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844236876472737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686697352292635,0.0,0.0,0.12423354103599014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861547856886691,0.08207995482104155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637132978773874,0.08914059728322359,0.0,0.09302023100623184,0.09071821810149523,0.0,0.05807779278140069,0.0,0.08752516970739976,0.0,0.0,0.1888834044753324,0.08023157397911349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489871141384187,0.2861674396532181,0.0,0.1332396311183746,0.0,0.0,0.06675639876562289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06449270651342158,0.0,0.0,0.059295106151668414,0.0,0.0,0.07003815105609933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158210197158717,0.0,0.0,0.13466745889009987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782759771239617,0.10735697515931172,0.0,0.0,0.19539531965019774,0.0,0.0,0.0800488880397054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882321438636317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595100817373957,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,u_j_c,2020/03/07,"When should I see a doctor about depression? Hi I'm new to this sub so sorry if I break some rules! 

Basically, I've been exhausted nearly everyday and also sometimes I get super sad. Like overwhelmingly sad to the point where I can't do anything except sit in my sadness. I feel the fatigue everyday but only feel the sadness two or three times a week.

 However, this has only really been occuring for about two months. I've had some things happen in my life which I think might be the cause of the sadness and I am a full time student who works and volunteers which probably contributes to being tired all the time. 

Is it too early to see a doctor about my mental issues (if there are any at all)?",5.193008921330089,5.9895031751824845,6.194841849148421,77.76108678021087,68.34306569343065,9.592538523925382,28.360908353609084,9.725611199111238,2.5867978913219787,553,18,104,12,9,184,93,137,0.19,0.78,0.03,-0.96,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,9,11,0,1,10,0,13,6,0,1,2,18,21,10,0,3,5,0,2,1,0,2,6,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,0,3,3,4,10,2,14,14,5,19,0,8,2,0,2,7,0,6,11,75,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487127005342514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146894210396326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387865619847478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732524808558854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14526007221361226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3452457727939456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17055145023514293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881139225099551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491387677521409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17602929708312334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912418368692465,0.08239504777494057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16996196018276272,0.17891355337788842,0.0,0.0,0.1346167433354525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16288554695836496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565355126914718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15943103920018428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818358211594504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804305140346314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687882679645972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16680154432414793,0.18879256341149156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204516614192113,0.10806565340763116,0.0,0.0,0.29502772678893,0.19384113366757946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3294977936784036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528278905037394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278096194511312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tron61,2020/03/07,"Lowest Point—-> Progress Hey, I’m an 18M and recently was diagnosed with depression, I made the mistake of allowing drs. to prescribe me meds after my first visit and had a horrible experience with them which led me to come off them within a week, then I had my first panic attack which I will call the lowest point in my life because it was the scariest thing that has happened to me and I’m still recovering days after. After I hit that low point I went back to my therapist and we talked which made me feel a lot better. I wanna turn this thing around, I wanna feel again and be able to enjoy life like I know I can. I’ve tried meditation which definitely helps along with controlled breathing but I’m looking for more ways to help better myself. For everyone fighting this fight, what do you do everyday to help with the depression and anxiety? Any vitamins/supplements? What self care techniques do you use? For everyone fighting any mental illness, please remember, we are STRONG. And the thoughts in our head may seem bigger than world but they are the complete opposite, they are meaningless unless we continue to put value into them. Thank you for reading and a reminder that you are loved❤️",4.979901671583086,6.97514744247788,5.335870206489677,79.16987217305804,70.15044247787611,8.739036381514259,29.812192723697148,9.2995712137729,2.8007490658800407,966,39,170,21,18,307,138,226,0.157,0.6779999999999999,0.165,0.6286,2,0,0,0,5,0,22.0,4,4,5,7,4,16,4,1,11,0,16,7,2,6,0,39,35,12,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,2,5,0,0,1,14,19,0,1,6,1,0,5,0,9,0,2,8,3,31,7,31,23,2,31,0,3,1,0,24,11,0,3,15,121,45,1,0.11899991036367467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184803945620596,0.0,0.09103460571113307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059351496697616,0.0,0.13537957742352716,0.0,0.09150358564356932,0.0,0.072541240840461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210491500583058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151221346890954,0.0,0.12132833954404645,0.0,0.0,0.10250788580613787,0.12476914194827325,0.0,0.13346851824062342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674509756761205,0.0,0.20498889684791244,0.1207824040906954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22741902796323146,0.0,0.11640474662819797,0.0,0.0,0.12033986045422533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024425259284186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523122773135833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212823950810132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392893945189526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653992386193614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16810631187062333,0.0581373452860412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999299538122142,0.0,0.0,0.101169468314131,0.0,0.2252011849671381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13218207380457908,0.0,0.1199239205689603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962075484874326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062616657691278,0.33748013839173363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962777791128143,0.0,0.0,0.11903211342944668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749805522797332,0.0,0.13480370079590775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833304907102212,0.12414285942541507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950334821348814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564762031383256,0.0,0.10955912932069284,0.0,0.1381680678495163,0.15811650548264808,0.0,0.0,0.09447263640978144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079312777766591,0.12943773079119886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277771489839432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09445658985679062,0.09545455012979917,0.0,0.0,0.11031410911621174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaysorrysad,2020/03/07,"How can I find a psychiatrist near my zip code, that takes my insurance? Pyshologytoday . com shows me offices that are no where near my zip code.  Yelp showed me a few that I emailed asking if they accept my insurance, so hopefully some of them work out. But aside from these, I don't know where to look.  I really need to find a good psychiatrist.  Please help, thank you.",2.8794567404426563,5.298433042253522,3.655855130784712,86.91746478873242,77.73239436619718,8.000804828973843,21.410462776659962,8.841846274778883,1.3806040241448687,290,8,61,7,7,92,52,71,0.028999999999999998,0.75,0.221,0.9229999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,2,1,4,4,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,11,10,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,13,4,7,10,2,5,0,0,1,0,6,5,0,3,0,39,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760369107461183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5397415304109253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24765785626145956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19791276890345505,0.0,0.0,0.2932690104273688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622722698432474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479518228770048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189384237240426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32411699277921585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891570563408264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22200574570741652,0.0,0.0,0.2718442748300653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21495954653765167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ouvar12,2020/03/07,"Feeling your worst at your highest point So I’ll try to make this sort as it’s basically a question/query that I was wondering.

Over the summer I attended a ‘bootcamp’ or sorts in an effort to get my weight where I wanted it to be. The camp was great, the people were cool, the training was fun and all in all I lost around 5 stone in less than 2 months and I had never felt better about my body in my life.

Weirdly towards the end of the camp when I was about to go home, excited to show off to my family and friends, I got really down. I was on the phone to my parents discussing noting in particular, probably travel plans, and I started crying. I ended the call and continued to cry for no reason that I could come up will, for a while.

When I can home and went back to uni the sadness continued. I’ve have mental health issues in the past that I only, in the past couple of years, came to terms with or understood.

I sought council and and happy to say that I’m feeling much better and encourage those going through tough times to do the same as it seems to help everyone I ask including myself.

So my question is, is it common to feel the most ‘down’ at your highest point? Has anyone experienced anything similar? Thanks 

TLDR: Do you ever feel especially ‘down’ when you should be feeling especially ‘happy’ or ‘proud’?",5.439928160919539,5.747123229885059,6.279154693486589,79.09850215517244,67.65900383141762,9.283620689655171,29.72246168582375,9.188382445141503,2.395400191570881,1037,35,202,18,16,343,156,261,0.096,0.784,0.12,0.7669,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,5,0,6,11,17,0,0,17,1,19,4,1,2,4,39,42,20,0,3,3,1,7,0,1,2,2,1,2,0,10,13,1,0,11,2,0,7,2,5,0,0,13,10,27,12,43,24,8,48,0,2,0,0,15,21,0,9,20,146,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080281056443421,0.0,0.0944826547947188,0.10220935972686636,0.10733617697106154,0.0,0.0,0.08828536071829715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20308841370979566,0.0,0.12753316697103625,0.0,0.0,0.1172385707328326,0.13131734578580795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890263437453507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167013673371092,0.12704020044731115,0.25223695192928713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033833606394325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385640295859393,0.0,0.10971029592297413,0.0,0.0,0.10823701165322112,0.0,0.29026862483769433,0.0,0.11024004680744576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887054956477561,0.0,0.05998590356342717,0.0,0.1305035963232022,0.0,0.09182774535247937,0.12658353108152454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24444460982283625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204257902833154,0.0,0.0,0.07695782397518655,0.0,0.2303368636458042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983664032177348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109696619065526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12533372773789836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663965475954312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570613885475806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916439395015102,0.0,0.08440196124043685,0.0,0.08855211807781559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.087321697221948,0.0,0.0,0.12748805536755414,0.0,0.21920710513901012,0.07959800552682468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21707386687725166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378958650053334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572373165525189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355318975221327,0.11804855842278175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913051993390225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452292385790596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126638360619062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570588227806453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694933204491957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779515947844388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772064147230669,0.0,0.0,0.1398132838741258,0.0,0.10643430907263894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451156480866744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393685514048443
mentalhealth,saj1441,2020/03/07,"No such thing as ""help"" Please stop perpetuating the myth of mental help. It does not exist. Hospitals cant help nor therapist. Stop spreading lies",3.196153846153845,6.3327843846153895,3.7373076923076947,79.84519230769233,89.76923076923076,7.2153846153846155,21.884615384615387,8.07648339933343,1.9244923076923082,118,4,20,3,4,37,23,26,0.207,0.517,0.276,0.3374,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,10,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567724242939114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5900165173925931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956967403775168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220852977583613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4906218514378173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34068138444379875,0.1949341509570535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BL00DWlTCH,2020/03/07,"i have to get this off my chest 
15f here. i really need to vent. i feel like i'm making shit up. please tell me if this is valid. if i have trauma. if i deserve help. because my brain is lying to me. ill try to make this post as short and comprehensible as possible, but will probably fail to do so, which im very sorry for. 
im diagnosed with bipolar ii and anxiety, and am prescribed depakine 600mg and asertin 50mg daily + atarax 25mg on a take-as-needed basis. i cut, bite, punch and scratch myself as a coping mechanism, which has turned into an addiction at this point, as i've been doing it for over 3 years now. the same can be said about my suicidal thoughts, with me having a thought-out plan to overdose/hang myself at 11 years old. i vape every day, and as u can probably guess it is also one of my coping mechanisms. i don't go to parties extremely often, but when i do, i like to get shitfaced, hoping i drop dead (i also mix my meds with alcohol). pretty sure this has something to do with my father being an alcoholic. drugs are on my to-do list.
besides all of my addictions and stuff i shouldn't do at my age, there is more to uncover. i have a problem with men. i'm terrified of them, i can't walk out on the streets in the evening. at any given time of the day, really. all that i can think of is that i'll be kindnapped, assaulted, raped, killed by a man. laughed at, my every insecurity and flaw will be pointed out. i'll be called a whore, a slut, a dumb bitch. as i should, because i am all of those things. worthless, a piece of shit, someone who should burn alive and rot in hell. even though i am a lesbian, and am in an extremely loving relationship with my wonderful girlfriend, i strive for male validation and attention. i'll wear short skirts and shorts, knee high socks, revealing tops, put on a long hair wig, do a full face of makeup, stand in a way that will make my boobs look bigger, stomach smaller and butt larger. when i'm out in public, i'll closely observe all of the men that walk past me, just to see it they checked me out. thought that they wanted to fuck me. have control over me. told me i'm useless. 
i came to the realization that maybe i have some repressed childhood trauma. it has always been this way. my father mentioned sex in conversations when i was as young as 8. i started watching porn at 7, learned how to properly masturbate at 10, lost my virginity at 14. even now, i use masturbation as a coping mechanism. i do it until i can't walk, until my body hurts so much that i can't move. during sex i like to be degraded, bitten, punched, slapped and hurt, because i feel like i deserve it. i watch struggle porn and imagine myself to he the women in those situations. i'm very hypersexual, which could very well be my bipolar disorder peeking through. but it has really taken a toll on me. i should also mention the time i was groped at 12 by my male classmate. i said ""no"", i said ""i dont want to"", ""please stop"". but he didn't stop. called me bossy and told me i'm overreacting. laughed at me. i dated him after that. i have nightmares where i'm sexually assaulted/raped, helpless, small, insignificant. panic attacks before i go to sleep. i see things. i hear some weird shit. i feel like i don't exist and that nothing is real. i feel like everything that's going on in my head is made up, a complete lie by me. i'm faking it, doing it for attention, i'm an attention whore. i also starve myself and then overeat. i vape so that i don't think about being hungry. i check calories on everything. i throw up when i think i ate too much. i'm so fat and ugly. 
also, another fun anecdote! my father is a piece of shit. he is a former alcoholic and was very abusive. i don't talk to him anymore because i blocked him everywhere. our relationship is non-existent. i have horrible daddy issues. but he treated me the best. he also had a gun in out house, was threatening to kill my mother and my sisters. i've been to plenty of rehab facilities, i've seen police at my doorstep numerous times. he used to call my sisters whores, slutes, told them they are worthless. tried to commit suicide twice and my oldest sister saw it all. i should also mention that my oldest sister had sex at 12 years old with a man in his 20s, she's had it way worse. 
another story. me and my gf were about it to take it a but further one time. she clearly wanted to put her hands on my chest (under my shirt), but was hesitant. i did it for her and suddenly, my eyes were watering. i felt a pain in my chest. i wanted to escape and scream. i wanted to die. i felt so helpless. she asked me if everything was okay and all i said was ""bad memories"". 
anyway, if someone is still reading this- thank you, you made it to the end of my vent. i'm sorry that this so long.",2.23684786521708,4.085409756449948,3.9896480428156593,86.52733908128738,77.33849329205366,7.025036599707201,24.992932056543545,7.940379951056878,1.4087718002255984,3710,133,770,61,86,1247,414,969,0.237,0.68,0.084,-0.9996,0,0,5,1,0,3,163.0,1,2,5,6,36,57,14,4,36,1,82,51,22,9,9,114,150,69,6,19,13,8,9,6,2,8,13,6,0,7,45,41,7,5,18,1,2,11,11,40,1,3,37,23,130,17,115,96,16,112,1,9,8,16,64,58,10,11,43,500,175,3,0.0,0.06380093977111558,0.0,0.11740428821699272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17264104219727114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014349454829262,0.044805754909327526,0.0,0.0,0.03661840907879429,0.11292840734403935,0.041193485487465896,0.0,0.05340263366438548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05034050458433098,0.06125974418553803,0.0,0.0,0.0449607356757398,0.13130068630324626,0.0,0.045820584997021,0.0,0.05651003432388251,0.0,0.0,0.05981286233336399,0.0,0.06011204946604465,0.1649541368245604,0.06158763647148429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645848408943247,0.0,0.06039498305320079,0.04299315541798902,0.0,0.0,0.06945486363542208,0.0,0.0,0.05465447091449125,0.05588560429934504,0.0,0.06171434264631995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631093214850298,0.0,0.0624464523174288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04769324419578653,0.0,0.0,0.10669806277622353,0.0,0.09073833297913804,0.0,0.14518502371693484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890843666451028,0.15387576239066114,0.10340483028724368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0497815030171844,0.05626659600786929,0.0,0.09180898380726353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059319517416629185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05526346626633962,0.0,0.0606904811932803,0.0,0.03609310299608951,0.05689324813133235,0.0,0.053483100951812745,0.0,0.06213323081756336,0.11529055158254163,0.0,0.1163299146890262,0.056203202980813216,0.0,0.0,0.11914941550951688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784414315494422,0.0,0.0,0.09530736942976913,0.04521866239733886,0.0,0.0587813286610907,0.0,0.04859981957783771,0.10190434365301387,0.10783164634616578,0.0,0.05409743924723357,0.0,0.05981286233336399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057231781110830715,0.07916878421887986,0.07985505049578848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051668499009897666,0.0,0.1130085965700485,0.0,0.07297744244735332,0.0,0.05729794738133079,0.0631788921771247,0.0,0.0,0.051403900309135116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821761746832715,0.10180731510140227,0.06070540079761756,0.051571389964668514,0.05478265884031387,0.11611425751454925,0.05152515469323038,0.0,0.10826399685682406,0.0,0.0,0.053862458114635976,0.06129068319790456,0.10348900409165114,0.0,0.0,0.11562495535075208,0.0,0.0,0.20488668293708176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581958704375138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22109632511584024,0.0,0.06052728012777357,0.053886774411271016,0.0,0.0912502783192532,0.04145473349864013,0.0,0.12055659982183052,0.03811381094355908,0.0,0.0430029914071219,0.09003848787657469,0.0,0.0562935021937083,0.06164294660425833,0.11780169508171147,0.0,0.05075099539691981,0.0,0.08097381780808949,0.0432808911350803,0.04706542590346457,0.04957589884018609,0.0,0.0,0.07154828565519597,0.10351065341450384,0.052905274704301175,0.12824762011683136,0.12559654170033704,0.0,0.0,0.15436188834118209,0.0,0.07311836000382088,0.058571037280009786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301456899887786,0.0,0.17772058179668013,0.15880439189713272,0.12822583674854235,0.0,0.0,0.04841571648575426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058395735491332326,0.0,0.0,0.054875596301648406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402881955132563
mentalhealth,yodawaffle87,2020/03/07,"I've been thinking about this for a long time... So, if you die (depending on what you believe in) you end up doing something. But what if when you died you were just still, couldn't move, or speak. Just be. You would be left to the scariest thing of all, your own mind-forever.",2.000714285714288,3.8169105000000014,2.474428571428572,97.27057142857143,77.92857142857143,5.908571428571428,21.91428571428571,6.742157984588678,0.21710428571428508,212,6,49,2,5,65,47,56,0.134,0.866,0.0,-0.83,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,7,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,1,1,11,8,6,2,4,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,7,0,7,2,2,10,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,4,5,38,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077550233121486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5669888306374921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419365156278204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967864819652241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241735839764166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758112613495768,0.0,0.0,0.29032325098890543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102900305495873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181439756939688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814737414328731,0.17502833115915706,0.0,0.0,0.15928036657112266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19404328928203712,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snakezilla30,2020/03/07,"Need help moving on Hi all-

I should probably start this by saying that I don't think I have depression or a mental illness or anything like that, but I've never been sadder and lately I just haven't felt like myself and I wasn't sure where else to turn to for advice. 

So there's this girl in my close friend group who I have feelings for but she has made it pretty clear that she doesn't have an ounce of interest, although she still wants to be friends (idek if we're still friends though). Our relationship has become really awkward and strained and I feel like every move I make is the wrong one and makes it even worse.

Lately she's been feeling down and it makes me miserable to see her miserable, and I feel helpless knowing all my efforts to make her feel a bit better haven't done much. Everytime I think about this though I'm reminded of how little I'm worth to her compared to how much I care about her, and it's become this cycle of sad thoughts every night. 

At the same time, I've been dealing with some personal stuff and the little things I once appreciated just aren't as nice anymore. I don't even enjoy the stuff I once enjoyed. Like I recently hung out with my friends but as time went on I kinda just wanted to go home more and more. They're all great people though and they've given me good advice on how to move on, but it's proving harder than I originally thought. When I get home now, tbh I just sleep because at least in my dreams I don't have to face reality. I feel broken and don't have much motivation to do anything. 

At first, I thought it was slowly getting better but I came to the realization that it isn't after I started feeling sad sometimes at school, even though before I only really felt sad late at night. It's almost like it just accumulates over time. 

I'd really appreciate any input on what I'm feeling rn. Anything helps. Also, thanks to whoever took the time to read the entire thing",5.3355240549828205,5.6914536520618615,5.8299484536082495,82.05933848797251,67.89175257731961,8.631615120274914,28.28006872852233,8.472884824447931,1.8422676975945016,1539,47,309,21,24,497,196,388,0.127,0.645,0.228,0.9928,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,0,0,5,25,30,0,4,10,0,26,3,2,10,7,71,66,33,0,5,13,0,10,5,4,1,1,1,2,2,23,17,0,0,18,2,1,7,11,10,0,2,16,12,41,20,43,48,12,46,0,7,1,0,23,19,0,6,25,201,64,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13997877750758805,0.0,0.0,0.07172031615883298,0.0,0.0,0.05727706897239486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04870625060985138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103099571821399,0.0,0.0,0.17681944005034764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0436608545620489,0.15820445474075906,0.060946091108237316,0.0,0.0,0.12668984824392926,0.07819401392743623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191789135333201,0.07302465364133733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384040235173553,0.061688980698545975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329542855228778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059832015893692005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419193983545806,0.0,0.12069131612168768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28971884596595504,0.051167647873878216,0.13753906040544658,0.0,0.0,0.06092268052853951,0.0,0.0,0.2213437108839792,0.0,0.07484036021951562,0.0,0.040705130616410005,0.060074164894474924,0.0,0.07896486091922006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601507897473063,0.0,0.14368787350896536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039362252599297064,0.0,0.2423823601519028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17495745507992969,0.1435705796463029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777162942163978,0.19123624146925566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721793671270044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283724670534537,0.15795393935649,0.053107715487325534,0.05524024830381469,0.0,0.0,0.13442709380796955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525527990301256,0.04853375242297436,0.054472691806333864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049654527584832166,0.06253863941696018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286657115028805,0.07722195294873622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164260953415684,0.0,0.13765102022334672,0.0,0.07071929624025343,0.07689654184523133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056957665072276474,0.0,0.07248652978053909,0.057074439045025536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167495270983279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07083720317286038,0.0,0.10139057781123073,0.0,0.11439680363729934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16398291903813922,0.0,0.0,0.0675040440774709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06594104478769043,0.0,0.0,0.0951665793106584,0.09178654403304652,0.2814778285737114,0.1705825261847525,0.16705631920338707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957604085912741,0.0,0.07790550414412041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844904702773229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06639544924324603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299018753332269,0.0,0.07830875541898856,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SheruBeeLee,2020/03/07,"I don’t want to die, I just don’t want to exist? Lately I feel like everything takes so much effort. And largely like that effort doesn’t pay off. With each breath, I can feel my muscles labor and gravity pull my ribs towards my lungs. I fall asleep everywhere and I appreciate the sleep because then I feel free from my physical body. I kind of wish I could just be a little ghost/ball of consciousness without a body. I love the people in my life and I appreciate them a lot. I am just having a hard time. 

I know I’ll never be enough. I try to convince myself otherwise, but I know I don’t really have intrinsic value to others. My value to them is what I can offer them. My value to myself is largely what I can offer other people as well. 

There’s no point to me rambling, other than to get these thoughts off my chest. I guess I just have to reach a point of acceptance. I will work on that going forward.",1.469091680814941,3.6530440698924767,3.4537011884550104,87.73739388794567,81.41935483870971,6.281380871533673,20.542161856253536,7.475848149327749,0.7515849462365587,711,20,145,11,19,240,106,186,0.055999999999999994,0.7559999999999999,0.188,0.9602,0,0,0,0,0,2,20.0,0,0,3,3,7,8,0,0,7,0,17,10,8,0,1,27,31,8,1,4,6,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,8,0,2,4,7,0,1,0,1,4,35,9,22,26,4,16,0,0,0,1,6,9,0,2,7,108,43,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034779278103748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.365700371204883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13143170450528366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084440904510587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17009132763990806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14794537215856926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.249702911893618,0.11760100844210487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600455756418117,0.0,0.09355451360704864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18134201150623774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746273083363098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17142121935907345,0.1809362279712445,0.0,0.18569292099505916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162724620735242,0.16084517468990714,0.16498750334038992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994980957772155,0.14857148919783192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101098596201948,0.0,0.12696125729940647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282466660217024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.311228818280342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545660173951626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16473391037033885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237700139865111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306859440518332,0.09598834625625832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117627979675124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19418841633784395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14800867907231374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18929915747189088,0.15868301208013907,0.0,0.11984170047816205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,treesofold,2020/03/08,"i need help but i cant figure out what i need help for i cant figure out anything anymore.  i cant make decisions.  i cant tell if im comfortable or in pain, happy or sad.   everything is the same.  all the differences are gone.  i cant cry anymore.  i cant tell if im a girl or a boy.  i cant tell what i want to do.  
theres a small glimmer of hope but i cant figure out where its coming from.  its there and its constant but i cant figure out what it is or what it means.  its the only thing i can hold on to.  im painting a story and that makes me happy sometimes.  but its takes so much energy to paint that every page takes weeks to make.  even though they only take hours to paint.   i cant figure out whats wrong.  every time i think i found the reason for this mess, i later find that it doesnt work.  it just doesnt feel right.   everything feels better in the morning and much much worse at night.  i cant ask for help because when people try to help me i feel annoyed and i dont know why.  its easier to ask strangers when they cant see your face or hear your voice.",0.02577376565954026,1.6958514152542392,2.2617391304347843,97.12275976418572,83.57627118644069,5.290788504053059,17.040530582166546,6.280692351149826,-0.5050182019159908,818,16,202,7,23,277,111,236,0.105,0.711,0.184,0.9657,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,2,2,9,10,1,0,9,0,20,2,1,4,1,47,43,19,0,6,12,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,20,10,0,1,15,0,0,2,15,5,0,0,2,6,26,5,21,41,6,22,0,1,1,0,16,12,0,8,8,125,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20785953261267628,0.0,0.0,0.0862384226164802,0.0,0.19594078112600025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388284952909927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268380788023167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027272994821826,0.0,0.11324756671390307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511381061017005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948982485941397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282047875973773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921696533646987,0.0,0.17659079888858942,0.0,0.18836830758709905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15896446852882146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578191625623628,0.0,0.0,0.11490372978101575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22311521214156946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811304227198388,0.0,0.2809709935452744,0.0,0.0,0.1040863680655356,0.1032032422308557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33959394935599585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057593303776353924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098570245732781,0.0,0.0,0.11415388873745598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23111200734971596,0.15541025164725142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834422496431364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15940461124798114,0.11151064793169492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265255675727399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774804637580043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894954644270995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350908011407493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364621665668364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363813182309157,0.0,0.2747897461010906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962200267589755,0.0671492351681537,0.10296182901663856,0.0,0.06110756311118766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07114980616553129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181157072519474,0.0,0.08406126766181014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456235737281074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629295181073996,0.0,0.10679637890883224,0.0,0.1145782987855363,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spiritual_Hatter,2020/03/08,"Apathy Solutions? (long story) It's so hard to figure out where to start, but I need to vent. I think I'll start at the end, then go to the beginning. 

I feel lost. I'm a student in their last semester of college and have been living in a mediocre haze for the last 5 years. My grades are mediocre, and I'm not sure what the next step of my life is. I used to have an infinite supply of hope. I still have hope to some extent, but it's depleting in a void of indifference. I want to stress this. I don't hate myself, I actually really like a lot of my characteristics. The problem is, I 'disappear' when I'm around people.  I become this little girly sycophant that has no personality whatsoever. I know I'm doing this, but I change it. I've done this since I was young. I found it easy to see what others were drawn too in interactions, and I played the part (maybe I was just weakly mirroring). I tolerated this version of myself for a long time, but when I got to college, I couldn't take it anymore. After taking a semester off and switching schools, I isolated myself, and for a couple of years, I LOVED it. I could do my own thing, and be happy. Maybe I was a bit lonely, but the world was my playground. However, at some point, I realized what I'd done, and started freaking out a bit. I've completely stunted my social skills. I can't carry a conversation unless I really get to know the person. I also have no desire to be around people (but at the same time am really lonely). It's like I want to WANT to be around people, but I can't. My playground has become my prison. I'm stuck following this lifestyle I've chosen for so long. The people in my life outside of college have no idea I live like this. I've hidden a lot from everyone in the past I.e. I was slightly bulimic for 4 years; I tried to kill myself 4 years ago. I haven't been suicidal since I realized that life is short, and I reasoned that as long as I wasn't in pain, there's no point in killing myself. The universe is billions of years old, and my lifespan will be 80-100 years tops. But I've lived in essentially long periods of apathy.

Now I feel no passion. I feel very little of anything actually. I think sometimes I feel adrenaline, but that's all. No real sadness, no anger, only a shadow or a taste of what I should be feeling, but not enough to act on. I know I should see a therapist, but I can't do it. I literally can't do it. I'm waiting for something to change, and it has to be out of my control. I've tried motivating myself with cliche's, making plans to be better, but my consistency always fades. I'm not suicidal. I'm a rational person, and this is genuinely not a risk anymore. But I am desperate to improve the quality of my life and figure out what the fuck might be wrong with me. I want the haze/foggyness to go away. I want to feel things.

Is anyone else similar? Any advice?",2.4099829351535824,4.1204633839590485,4.4859194539249145,83.77537747440275,76.42320819112628,7.7596723549488065,24.51863481228669,8.548686976883017,1.6524338293515362,2237,75,462,45,50,770,245,586,0.152,0.6990000000000001,0.149,-0.1674,1,4,1,0,0,4,88.0,0,0,1,9,14,27,5,2,32,0,52,10,0,5,2,87,101,35,4,14,20,0,7,3,0,4,6,0,0,3,30,21,1,2,19,1,0,6,19,16,0,2,15,10,69,11,70,72,13,70,0,4,2,3,8,30,1,8,37,313,99,7,0.0,0.0,0.13141036107675685,0.0,0.0,0.06579491086979172,0.0596847210533319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05384444292231864,0.05602464691872743,0.0,0.0,0.045787275396132004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354818824643913,0.047079284039287336,0.06898839532401524,0.05540753870125517,0.1798161493345361,0.0,0.0,0.06325953411433399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872323053840045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059548650314972966,0.14701566247434986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424541873880391,0.0,0.07059509750651623,0.0,0.07551725460413371,0.05375819148877629,0.07450028619743079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780563810109125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05624627137027293,0.0,0.0596351332967127,0.06957074928202563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06433749644827005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20426695375228152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382478321842068,0.0,0.0622462702674097,0.03517758132899259,0.0,0.07653132820665605,0.0,0.05385061803694048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07167492387094249,0.06031520135458283,0.06647525816329805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13374941915419833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600831505843134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489831819149594,0.0,0.11100979509259908,0.10976723104328727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19023103457564047,0.09868333215610962,0.13496636646709914,0.178363077616356,0.2979283426794778,0.0,0.0,0.07349955804373046,0.11448453309520135,0.0607687056645349,0.0,0.044943853941936215,0.0,0.13528574350178518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142737373992923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049924959614644784,0.0,0.0,0.07160710487771291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065238309710807,0.0,0.0,0.05120813263340703,0.07164475361933054,0.0,0.0,0.07291273093016992,0.06427489885825431,0.1867148877792448,0.17637205923450294,0.0,0.0,0.12729880109914868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644265140708544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663722868901705,0.12940156740888872,0.06922731038462802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814239774186537,0.10730791329299193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139352187357204,0.0,0.0,0.06863530519690934,0.0,0.05183456482479145,0.06659191560336389,0.0,0.14297133070257706,0.0,0.0537704903066264,0.0,0.07712724185499333,0.0,0.0,0.14729800639976606,0.0,0.0634585133905306,0.0,0.101248814165503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817628677904477,0.0894632274265763,0.08628575833037459,0.0,0.0,0.07852230050820737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091426431956795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05815222170684719,0.0,0.05555498878156976,0.19856734928771247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361569624848842,0.0,0.2601530940179176
mentalhealth,thekoreanjukebox,2020/03/08,I feel suicidal For the first time in almost two years I’m having serious thoughts of self harm and suicide.that’s all,4.388695652173912,6.679667217391309,4.286304347826088,84.81467391304348,72.47826086956522,8.078260869565218,28.89130434782609,8.841846274778883,2.4269304347826086,98,4,18,2,2,30,22,23,0.354,0.6459999999999999,0.0,-0.8519,0,0,0,0,0,1,1.0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,4,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,1,1,1,0,3,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,10,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896032667876103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19672844265684916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3309477234150992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40589097094756604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255858356896985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088827685927482,0.2268732598550373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3800705753005866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505520942000837
mentalhealth,allthisonmychest,2020/03/08,"I can’t work out if my mental illness is spiralling out of control or if I’m right to be paranoid. What do I even tell my psychiatrist? Who do I even go to for help? I’m at a loss. Does anyone else feel like this? I feel alone. I’m in my early twenties and suffering with a currently unknown mental illness. So far it’s been assumed I may have Paranoid Schizophrenia or some form of dissociation disorder  or something connected to trauma. 

I don’t know when I’m due a psychiatrist appointment and I’m losing my friends mostly due to her actions - which so far I figured is her talking about me and asking questions - and becoming very isolated. 

Over the past year my mother has been scaring me. She scared me before ever since I was a child but recently it’s picking up. She mentioned how she’d mercy kill a person with dementia last year through overdose. In the past, she’s gotten me to take more of my meds without any word from a doctor and I can only assume because it was in drop form she assumed it was safe to do so. I no longer take meds; I’m paranoid about any form of medication and I don’t want her to tell me I need more even though she wouldn’t with the strong stuff. 

Somehow I’ve gotten it into my head that food and drinks have been poisoned or drugged. I can eat if I make my own food and if I’ve looked over the items carefully but anything she’s made makes afraid to eat it unless I see others eat it first. 

Over the past few months she’s made pregnancy comments; told me to get pregnant, asked me when will I be pregnant, told me I will be pregnant because she wants a baby again. Last I had a pregnancy scare I nearly threw myself down the stairs and I cried for days as I was so afraid of the idea of another person growing inside of me that I rarely ate. The real kicker is how often she’s referred to me as mentally a child and unable to live a normal life yet has these fantasies about me getting pregnant and it’s becoming creepy. 

I’ve been having a strong urge within me to runaway and make sure I’m outside as much as possible. I’m talking to people more and during one severe episode I told my friend that if I die any time soon that it wasn’t suicide and wasn’t my fault. I had a good reason at the time but I can’t remember what it was as sometimes the episodes can spiral and it all goes blank. 

I’ve tried talking but it’s as if my mother ignores my protests and requests or she really does forget. She was bad before but chemotherapy seems to have made her worse mentally and she won’t listen to me when I ask her to go to a doctor. It’s as if there are ten of her and the nice one rarely comes out to make sure I’m ok. 

I’ve got plans of actions and there’s some people I need to talk to for further planning but what if something goes very wrong before this? What if my paranoia is correct and I’m in grave danger? I don’t know. It’s becoming hard to tell the difference between reality and the screaming void in my head. Are all these things really happening or is she right when she says it’s just my mental health? 

Has anyone else experienced something similar and with a good outcome? I’d like to know please so I know that it’s going to be ok eventually and can finally sleep without being afraid.",3.5754800835997083,4.7736543584337365,4.675922055569219,85.67438898450949,72.43373493975903,7.408359970494223,27.40644209491025,7.817275551320576,1.5590589254979106,2570,92,526,33,49,843,275,664,0.154,0.759,0.087,-0.9926,1,1,5,0,0,1,39.0,0,0,0,9,27,35,4,6,27,2,51,19,3,12,6,107,103,64,4,15,25,2,3,2,2,5,9,3,0,4,34,32,7,3,16,2,0,8,12,20,0,4,25,9,80,15,73,67,15,59,0,4,2,0,50,24,0,26,28,352,114,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06361641766533173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125310645029176,0.06440809382674695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858977434150226,0.12587165673996326,0.050546462629366656,0.0,0.17226857362871573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05128621486886607,0.0748866217263811,0.2035129169442148,0.15680110649361784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06262554488216822,0.0,0.0,0.05291106947851964,0.0,0.0,0.06889189047543348,0.0,0.0,0.06747103842573085,0.03961319812229069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374809190942968,0.06417468191834319,0.07039686939904391,0.1257394974190209,0.10750456880926304,0.0,0.0,0.060171831239088626,0.07123197881920235,0.18855530568343076,0.10262322133411468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217093023810518,0.055561243514724384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06211532573767721,0.0438810958854944,0.0,0.06728664922596471,0.0,0.0522469587123423,0.14854753775272336,0.0,0.09491157991952136,0.0,0.06418268494561914,0.0,0.10472549436000944,0.10303855266019488,0.04912613546775087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05431676556410291,0.0,0.05502356074125852,0.0,0.12607685184578285,0.06529050938979226,0.0,0.0,0.04117100415997813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933986866547266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795621149742605,0.0,0.13502741301193125,0.1001370097266726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04338536824369688,0.06001702389109704,0.0,0.054238242957058896,0.0,0.05158042903297036,0.06871739671872562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436173984179065,0.16400315819437972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13645574359256016,0.061877904836812686,0.3095031588770115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0490278027568712,0.0,0.045153479111633296,0.0910897745897208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060182173997738474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832445630100043,0.04671548354512134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17590758492245434,0.08516690434821814,0.10726559249189067,0.0,0.06742476562763981,0.0,0.06924598056982348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880858945089274,0.0,0.0,0.06991360574296497,0.07869917637599609,0.06315378266764443,0.060648482942236064,0.0,0.06958106610707962,0.10491099004164116,0.0,0.04884658307161309,0.18448748521697814,0.0,0.04894672779407057,0.05591781979639183,0.0,0.06939128531385093,0.0,0.050810310496687834,0.0,0.06146804872095956,0.0,0.0,0.1418608706634239,0.060749599284891535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031542872199702,0.06718754659009354,0.0,0.11578220042959447,0.0,0.0923659401129174,0.19748013897979486,0.1610610353345866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040807169816744884,0.0,0.06034846283988276,0.0,0.07163329433581375,0.0,0.0,0.17607890204744772,0.0,0.04170265305554697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136195290908626,0.07245856672537154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842048908816345,0.0,0.044717177339102805,0.0,0.06259598693582061,0.0,0.06715716176136036,0.0,0.0791096840665889
mentalhealth,h00manRus,2020/03/08,"Daily Accomplishment Thread This is probably already a thread. Apologies in advance if there is one.

Kinda wanted to make this to inspire and for people to share their daily accomplishments and for discussions related to accomplishments.

My daily accomplishment is finally catching up on chores (especially laundry) and forming a habit to keep up with cleaning in general. Trying to avoid things getting out of hand again. I hope it finally sticks to prevent the internal conflict of being extremely overwhelmed when things are disorganized. It’s like the physical symptom of my depression/anxiety. Disorganized room=Disorganized mind. Clean room=Calm mind. Also, trying to form a better habit with dental care. Actually, no cavities last cleaning!",7.279879211697395,11.051371851239667,7.349090909090908,58.95132867132867,70.15702479338843,10.665225683407503,38.23331214240304,10.389873798559362,5.791328798474254,618,35,74,21,13,198,83,121,0.083,0.72,0.196,0.9335,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,6,4,8,0,2,5,0,5,2,1,1,0,19,11,6,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,6,6,0,4,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,1,0,1,4,6,21,10,2,13,0,1,0,0,4,6,0,3,6,53,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.19662123851255844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223447741953948,0.16112825454031293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413621280954412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781979637030642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20542837108704826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44143605528393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105268101420751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001210272078404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17908998466294102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423795459491136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843586573688316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13449344714043338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4068867777557981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653210533476373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396849996570853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172359499893556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094210666948972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677166462950296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27359149060748983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884164330786992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MudaMuda69,2020/03/08,"I used to make fun of people in this chat and now I am shellshocked, depressed, and have crippling anxiety. I used to make fun of people in this chat and now I am shellshocked and depressed and my anxiety spikes so bad I stopped doing everything and am having trouble picking up anything. Anyone been through what I have through that has tips for this. Prior to this it was mild anxiety but the injury has me scared. Even now that it is mostly healed I am reverting to sitting in bed all day and am overthinking useless shit. bootloopes of bad experiences of my life are now happening and fear owns me like a bitch. I hate asking for anything since my dad was military styled and I hate asking for any help. It makes me feel great shame. Positive thinking helps but at this point it is difficult to move forward with my life. Sometimes my fight or flight instincts kick in and I just sit and think of awful things that have happened to me. I need advice from someone who experienced something like this and recovered.",4.611734293193717,6.779312408376963,4.510651178010471,83.9854532068063,71.5130890052356,7.497513089005237,30.26210732984293,8.278499904357787,2.297965706806284,814,35,147,13,16,250,110,191,0.282,0.604,0.114,-0.991,0,0,1,0,1,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,7,20,5,3,2,1,18,4,1,6,1,30,33,16,0,1,4,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,16,13,0,1,3,2,0,2,0,15,0,0,3,2,20,5,24,30,3,18,0,3,0,0,9,8,2,2,10,105,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109421378013253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912296527168976,0.0,0.30788345013571644,0.0,0.0,0.09380393779506692,0.0,0.22079542710858008,0.0,0.25083267494990386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22402678897206893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651854693256474,0.0,0.2310941291978427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860777459132874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205694041749144,0.1312288322449835,0.0,0.15096109703400767,0.06783254041337683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790579747564248,0.0,0.0,0.2372647427342432,0.0,0.0,0.2648995671411412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798418519342666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895145656753569,0.13108221361589142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686474889415359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258499062249547,0.0,0.09947385355744376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860116617750747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268193544503178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431204669834726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770765487038286,0.1109739794246046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11366866298687142,0.10327867965030132,0.132682219714717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121591596519049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912628124787772,0.1719215589656864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317328098312605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Donaldinho2019,2020/03/08,"Just feel lost, any help or advice would be brilliant thanks Hi, my girlfriend broke up with me a couple of weeks ago, but i knew it was gonna happen for weeks before that so I had time to prepare, anyways I’ve spent a lot of the last few weeks focusing on myself, new hobbies, meeting new people which is brilliant, but I feel as though I’m nobody’s priority, like I see everyone going out having happy times, and don’t get me wrong I’m a very social person, but it just makes me feel a bit rubbish. Also since my girlfriend broke up with me while I don’t really miss her much anymore, I just feel as if I’ve had my chance with girls and now I’ll be forever alone and no girl finds me attractive, im very fake it till I make it with my outgoing confidence because the people around me wouldn’t tell you I feel like this. I do have purposes and goals in life but days like today make me feel no motivation because I don’t feel worth it. I don’t think I’m a bad looking guy, take care of my hygiene, good at having conversations, go to the gym but having all that stuff doesn’t mean I’m always a happy guy. People can tend to tell when my energy is off because when it’s not I’m the funny one who makes people laugh. Venting this out is helping me feel better but like I said I just feel as though I’m never gonna get anywhere and it’s annoying me cause I thought I was through this bad phase, I started getting help for my anxiety and things were looking good but I just feel a bit tired drained and purposeless at the moment. Any advice would be brilliant thanks x",3.8799804796430566,4.5495494631901865,4.920992749581711,86.17430005577248,71.23926380368098,7.76776352481874,26.47462353597323,7.84624498591911,1.3667104294478531,1239,38,263,15,22,407,167,326,0.135,0.623,0.242,0.9921,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,4,14,23,1,0,12,0,25,2,0,6,2,56,70,27,0,4,15,0,10,4,2,5,2,1,0,5,16,14,0,0,16,1,2,2,10,9,0,1,10,14,36,14,27,52,6,31,0,4,3,0,20,10,0,3,23,155,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16449739114096493,0.07461048867198199,0.0,0.0,0.08717340627237816,0.0,0.06730969212564608,0.07003511469118534,0.0,0.0,0.11447522689136592,0.0,0.06438883769468114,0.0,0.08347274989708962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749280024334071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405547249911413,0.15392540494332027,0.0,0.07162137836931125,0.0,0.0,0.07444038979066453,0.18378087768635168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581561595879332,0.08646445712118421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313108382337866,0.0,0.05428185899792519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042681552700932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255823201769568,0.06013014784056275,0.0,0.0,0.07692868197889145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13192404120860046,0.0,0.09567004244037904,0.14119345197992705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16668052451949006,0.07443011797411261,0.17919832751700834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16924954928271954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091665717661752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686087377453934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059450853584381874,0.16448233330085127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413610467489453,0.0,0.09188009671549432,0.07155723281326977,0.0,0.0,0.2247330872109587,0.0,0.0,0.09168440710503888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187369115810499,0.0,0.06491610295327835,0.16258134164736554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05703490056146535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334079605917173,0.07349287665437568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0539206350129404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800637237740629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707156964013195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962523201250981,0.0,0.0,0.08579940679150007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05957505070837736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635304313181227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328439983489842,0.0,0.14713433610522322,0.15498249134368378,0.0,0.0,0.055917955204189504,0.053931914909254634,0.1653906731036042,0.06682055911441293,0.09815891084303756,0.09673955782638256,0.07978210159293514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13889601184382191,0.0,0.0,0.2025452020420448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195820824773167,0.09202527839780016,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,keyzonthefloorz,2020/03/08,"My brother is moving out of the shed...slowly...and my sister keeps getting on my case about it. I'm switching places with  my brother.  He has lived in a shed in the yard for almost two years now.  Recently, I walled off my room and had a toilet put in my closet and told him he could move into my room.  My brother hasn't been allowed to come in the house since he threatened my sister last year.  

I moved all my crap out of my room last Sunday.  I stashed it in the dining room.  The guys came and installed the toilet Monday - Thursday.  On Friday I had serious anxiety that I made a mistake but I was fine by the afternoon.  On Saturday, I told my brother to move out of the shed and into my old room.  Well, my brother has schizophrenia and he was spent most of the day Saturday ""taking an online test to be in the elite forces!""  I said okay and went back in the house.  He didn't start moving until it was almost dark.  

My sister keeps bugging me about when I'm going to move my stuff.  I'm going to move it when he's out of the shed and after I paint it.  She's getting on my nerves.  If she wants him to move faster she can go on out there and help him move faster.  I feel like he's gotten a lot done especially for having had to take time to holler about the local invisible drug dealers.

I'm about to go see what's going on.  Last time I checked, he told me he was going to put his bed in the bathroom.  The bathroom is 5x9 so I guess it will fit?",2.2302227722772265,3.512129980198022,3.6261592409240926,91.55131806930693,75.93069306930694,6.106105610561056,21.865924092409237,6.42735559955562,0.25811122112211216,1116,28,249,8,24,367,142,303,0.033,0.9059999999999999,0.06,0.8988,1,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,1,11,7,1,0,20,1,20,3,1,2,1,34,51,14,0,4,2,8,1,1,0,1,1,1,8,1,9,18,1,2,1,1,2,20,2,3,1,1,19,3,38,4,47,29,3,76,0,0,1,0,30,31,1,6,26,155,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15680317122098708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059895806618863213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060204369841847474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954913915529891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744459930584486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251254761227087,0.0,0.0,0.05049408943936719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012343118752792,0.0,0.0,0.09079786737582203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03958853314078658,0.055934286686456336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181228448402318,0.0,0.2669826587831416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625126769114481,0.07752480725843845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05247979120354545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18068487934998007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13918519072479107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19146373046124301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038251203082444375,0.0,0.06913631872016825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656399357739337,0.0,0.07408504996403227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7489410735635401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215790635740576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180208319772939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741710959356986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730731340078217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07447690450783652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062391338446552064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476680713184013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05541792404233288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962956073112563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773687211052135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913094156109992,0.0,0.0,0.2244439795272775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648328001238945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046180686265021184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039701442177812,0.07258066858577877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083940838219374
mentalhealth,africanqueen86,2020/03/08,"What borderline personality disorder (BPD) is like for me - Fighting stigma around BPD I have recently started a mental health blog as I pledged to help eradicate stigma around BPD, bipolar and OCD.

My first post is about the role BPD plays in my life:  [https://heavymental.blog/2020/03/08/empty-on-the-inside/](https://heavymental.blog/2020/03/08/empty-on-the-inside/) .

I hope that this post will create awareness around the condition and better understanding. Let me know your thoughts.",16.54915384615385,19.64764972307693,9.445961538461543,56.282788461538466,44.07692307692307,11.423076923076925,37.78846153846154,11.20814326018867,4.602307692307692,412,14,48,8,4,103,51,65,0.071,0.723,0.20600000000000002,0.836,0,0,0,0,2,0,37.0,0,1,0,2,4,5,1,0,3,0,5,3,0,0,0,9,10,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,8,4,8,7,0,9,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,4,30,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3830101450806962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12683920371392865,0.0,0.0,0.7225063440347722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436639161397826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198900533024044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244378800720465,0.0,0.0,0.09612827176362478,0.0,0.0,0.14244378111835546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881731401980108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466518902836844,0.1012984879574345,0.07006548541577279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452891968640047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252247332355589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747044824762581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14160533533913994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151010780998287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385575134178745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14930041499209004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Contxy,2020/03/08,"Getting help  Over the past year or so I have been dealing with multiple mental health problems, of which I dislike speaking about as they haven't been officially diagnosed and I feel I would be appropriating the term, but I would like to potentially move forward in terms of getting myself some help and getting back to doing the things I used to enjoy.

I live in the UK so mental health issues aren't taken very seriously unless you are explicitly showing severe signs of depression (for example heavy h*rming etc) so finding a counsiller/ therapist is difficult, when I speak to my parents about this my mum is sympathetic and quite honestly saddened that I could be feeling this way but nothing is ever done about it.

I've tried contacting safeguarding practices and all they tell me is to go to group therapy (of which I am currently way too anxiety-ridden to go to) or to just.. get a hobby.

When I bring this up to my mother she always poses the question ""Why are you depressed?"" which stumps me every time because unlike others I don't have a big root reason or scenario that caused how I feel. 

Any help or suggestions would be useful, I don't usually get much traction when I post since I'm not really familiar with the platform, but if you see this, please respond! I'm pretty out of ideas myself :/",8.925598639455785,7.901385746938777,8.844336734693881,68.01738945578235,60.91836734693877,11.758503401360546,38.78401360544218,10.864195022040775,4.296054421768709,1048,45,177,22,12,342,152,245,0.08800000000000001,0.748,0.16399999999999998,0.9652,2,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,3,2,1,14,8,0,0,9,0,24,3,0,6,3,40,41,21,0,6,11,3,3,1,0,3,3,2,0,0,12,7,0,0,7,1,0,5,5,5,0,0,4,6,28,3,28,30,6,27,0,2,1,0,21,8,0,7,14,129,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736273661946276,0.0,0.0,0.07957166497422823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089974431389277,0.0,0.07132897417066157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020278973990507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342396475346246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063346457438273,0.20156324263454986,0.11876395939522325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974313793157156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049847835657472,0.0,0.10584337795426237,0.0985870278607646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749321693266554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694616600572104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056677528742766,0.0,0.13300038395836028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24875498189088285,0.0,0.0,0.2352905305065519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320914627210165,0.0,0.12212934834074085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571657880705272,0.0,0.1033230807254651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23583964469316565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436444474226548,0.08601673492595516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227545369571232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12992714983881865,0.0,0.11170048171578854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844321869636682,0.0,0.0,0.11206443610627212,0.11904251127510833,0.0,0.11196396703562107,0.0,0.0,0.1310793833802594,0.12445587146507872,0.0,0.0,0.07496040533763626,0.12030705695709247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324281966726078,0.0,0.0,0.13218941070423612,0.0,0.09679291818674177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227299317677396,0.0,0.13381256618967607,0.13585908413840325,0.07773707759101657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823020298749398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794429604132957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021203080170692,0.12887136467877136,0.096546538677589,0.0,0.18575617345618528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055844564899951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24936431214507385,0.0,0.0,0.07535141099103775
mentalhealth,cunnislaire,2020/03/08,"Looking to volunteer for a mental health organization or non profit, any recommendations? Apologies if this is the wrong sub to post this in, feel free to point me in the right direction :) I considered posting it in mental health support but I think I’ll reach more people this way. 

Does anyone have experience volunteering with mental health organizations or nonprofits? 

I’m in the Seattle area and I’ve been looking into NAMI and I’m just curious what it’s like and what I’d be doing (the open volunteer positions on their website are somewhat vague.) I’m also wondering what other places people recommend, locally or nationwide, that I could volunteer at and what your experiences have been like. 

Or on the other side of things, was there a particular one that helped you in a time of need?

I’ve been told crisis text line is good, but I’m not sure if I’m qualified for any type of suicide or crisis hotline. However I am open to it if there’s sufficient training. I am in a decent place with my own mental health but I’m not fully there yet, and I would prefer to be in a really solid place in order to be able to provide the best support. 

This is something I really want to get involved in so any information helps! Please feel free to share any negative experiences you’ve had. Also not necessarily looking for any religious groups but I can be open minded. 

Thanks in advance :)",3.982913486005089,6.39972993129771,5.511774809160304,74.98969783715016,74.11450381679391,8.794147582697201,27.71055979643765,9.408791572840183,2.8614117048346066,1110,44,193,29,24,374,142,262,0.09,0.7040000000000001,0.20600000000000002,0.9831,1,0,1,0,0,1,25.0,0,2,1,2,8,13,0,0,11,0,21,4,0,0,1,40,41,20,1,8,16,0,2,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,16,11,0,0,6,0,3,1,4,1,0,1,6,5,13,14,31,29,4,32,0,0,3,0,11,25,0,10,4,126,29,4,0.09591554535732116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534072539378353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261292996358829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706637946134983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065744733361487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658075824886215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393634010564574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814714243288854,0.0,0.0,0.09699556334467914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05011191368105658,0.0,0.0,0.08044940876349434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4078149580069017,0.0,0.0,0.12858033648017825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371898116050534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416347034583043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3866412405726016,0.0,0.09684735836245664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112016154099139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499485584794537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13299152451465082,0.0,0.3006339909456326,0.1052864659046452,0.09067119300673672,0.0,0.18372115789340704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289190882761128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191135166151615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384047282563609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491603889795034,0.21768764844170246,0.09039926638542184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830614750509322,0.0,0.0,0.06372202637385976,0.06145880856499564,0.0,0.0,0.05592912583023742,0.0,0.0,0.09165141395931566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05657347373783773,0.07613329540349342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401631745677987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813565147040407,0.1048685917736681,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,duckofdoom159,2020/03/08,"My Wife Is Losing It There is something going on with my wife. Our son is 4 and diagnosed with autism lvl 2. She used to be such a great mom, a great person too. So sweet and loving. She’s so angry all the time. She’s constantly lashing out. Not just with me, but with our 4 yr old. She says she can’t stand him. Doesn’t want to be around him. She’s started becoming so mean to him for no reason at all. He does a lot of repeating of the same word or phrase over and over again and  that is something that is guaranteed to send her over the edge. He’s also started spitting as well. I’ve had to stop her from trying to slap him a couple of times when he’s done that. Recently, if she’s not going off on people, she’s just sitting on her phone for hours or just laying in bed awake and doing nothing. I told her that if she doesn’t stop, then we’re going to have to get a divorce. She said that’s fine, that she’ll keep our 8 month old. It’s like she doesn’t even have feelings anymore. My son is devastated. He loves his mom and just wants to be around her, but she doesn’t even want to be near him. She says she doesn’t know how to even interact with him; so she just doesn’t want to. I’ve tried to reason with her; like this is your son. It’s not his fault that he’s autistic. You need to love him; you’re his mom. But, it doesn’t seem to get through to her. I don’t want to lose my wife. We’ve been together for going on 11 years now. I’m so conflicted. I would like to help her work through this. But, I also need to do what’s best to protect my son.  Can someone please explain what is going on with her? Any advice would be appreciated.",0.7664674838270358,2.4324278258426983,2.3728907048008168,97.26451651344911,81.13483146067415,5.551106571331292,18.65304732720463,6.42735559955562,-0.3099183520599249,1270,28,311,11,33,415,160,356,0.057999999999999996,0.7659999999999999,0.17600000000000002,0.9915,0,0,2,0,1,0,43.0,3,2,0,4,25,15,0,0,8,0,33,5,1,4,2,59,62,25,0,11,16,10,1,3,0,3,1,3,1,1,15,16,0,5,7,0,0,6,13,3,1,0,5,5,50,12,52,49,5,41,0,2,0,3,69,15,0,6,21,204,65,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298401736621302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15219026972074354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06470842127913339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09436783856815403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694156151938765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509082897391044,0.0,0.0,0.09985892886989613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028283664411754,0.0,0.0,0.10528680431346668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657996121877097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832704706729629,0.0973762383515673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18854623588192826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04811304735669165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942874881826773,0.0,0.2703928866591981,0.0,0.0,0.20981666306195104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378015246147369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370815742859563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457782015915047,0.0,0.0,0.05229450413035496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394632586267764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21290741525009332,0.0,0.08089707602578815,0.2576423453486755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10365130344420208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33433190892793746,0.07595152944372502,0.0,0.0,0.14111192645287066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130344777127686,0.0,0.19969758542167404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659682494370813,0.08308536532676505,0.0,0.10445122530167314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19566964514198895,0.09395373194159558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051385715207493,0.15134158513228632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662521463088299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062422153041865,0.14650938840473146,0.0,0.0,0.13470189432764246,0.0,0.0,0.15910708715708566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109708768895436,0.0,0.0,0.09092434062086824,0.0,0.12920751505576786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218306129746512,0.0,0.0,0.2806233736081964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555545305504643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927371451161242,0.0,0.0,0.13519025872246435,0.0,0.0,0.061276471316320885
mentalhealth,JammyAces,2020/03/08,"Emotional support Hi there,
I'm new to this whole posting on reddit (I've been a lurker for a long time!) Just looking for advice/a person to talk to about my feelings and maybe recieve advice on how to better myself as a person and cope better!
If you think you can help let me know or if you're in a similar situation we can get through it together.",3.890416666666667,4.765617208333335,5.595444444444446,80.59400000000002,71.3611111111111,7.982222222222222,28.288888888888888,8.238735603445708,1.9565688888888888,277,10,54,4,5,95,54,72,0.0,0.815,0.185,0.9078,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,2,0,2,4,3,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,1,0,11,11,7,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,6,3,12,9,1,7,0,0,1,0,8,3,0,3,3,37,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170661490058952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3929178117727204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498701322297925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231730142959157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605551264500515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14889130917300578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207868564166495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271464111070837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19658103391347487,0.18653607710374467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22316281737539787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145377837716776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3879165646112875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127423560269404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496872042251912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520743050962124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17854238090791566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14233408805655126,0.0,0.0,0.12952774885683324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480039641588409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sHaD0x_,2020/03/08,"i don't care anymore. Lately a lot of people aroud me have been in pain. My nephew got cancer, multiple friends of mine where in the hospital and the grandmother of my sister's boyfriend died. The problem is that i can't get myself to care about it. And now i don't know how to talk to them. How do you wish someone well? I don't know what to say to my nephew, what do you say to someone who is sick. I'm more worried about how to act like i care about them, then about how they're doing. 

Am i insane?",1.5347222222222214,2.9119415462962976,2.8566666666666687,95.955,77.98148148148148,5.911111111111111,21.259259259259263,6.42735559955562,0.05399259259259237,389,10,93,3,9,126,65,108,0.254,0.66,0.086,-0.9654,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,2,0,11,8,0,0,4,0,12,3,0,4,0,11,21,7,1,2,0,3,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,2,1,0,2,2,16,6,16,19,2,7,0,0,0,0,12,3,0,1,4,65,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18706646686584907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5769508288316648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19576417542705254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14573210448260873,0.0,0.09854938413627133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086157269499942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20732801074175145,0.0,0.21277852617138326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921532146430282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603632171885845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20071153499006408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130769630149019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18048976205469405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000061890802689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31964466908103223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15161056359743655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16959757229742828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21691077676259535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915590231549107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lyl0e,2020/03/08,"Someone please explain to me whats going on and help me I have no idea what is happening to me right now.

I dont know how to start this post so im gonna get right to it. The past weeks have been stressful. As in not getting any rest or proper sleep for weeks straight stressful. I'm at university for ~8 hours a day and do project work for another 2 hours a day. I've got a saturday job at a hairstylist where i always struggle with the feeling of not being good enough. I also feel like im unable to talk around my coworkers. Basically im really fn anxious all the time.

Two hours ago i got told that i'm getting laid off. Im not really sure how to explain this, but since then, SOMETHING is happening to my mind that has never happened before.

Basically i feel like im dreaming. I drove home and even though my glasses usually correct my eyesight pretty well, i felt like they weren't working at all. I couldnt read the streetsigns or anything of that matter. My mom was in the car with me and i was so scared about getting into an accident. We stopped to get fuel and i went to the bathroom at the gas station. For some reason, when i first walked in, the bathroom had a window. When i looked again before walking out, it didn't anymore. Driving home, i missed the driveway to our apartment complex. Just straight up missed it. It felt as if my brain couldnt comprehend what it was seeing. I walked home from my car (after i somehow managed to park it) and honestly i have no idea what my mom and i were talking about the whole way home. I am scared i said incoherent shit. I couldnt even really tell you right now what i wrote in my post. What the fuck is happening. It feels horrible. 

I am so sorry if what i said is incoherent in any way, i just fucking want to know what's going on. I'm typing this with the best of my abilities.",2.1627628285356693,4.073604569148936,3.6612390488110163,88.51029411764708,77.77659574468085,6.6575719649561975,25.68648310387985,7.618777277803332,1.3255246558197749,1442,55,302,21,34,476,190,376,0.139,0.76,0.10099999999999999,-0.9502,3,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,2,1,1,4,22,18,3,5,18,0,24,5,3,3,5,55,65,24,0,6,10,2,6,3,0,1,0,2,6,0,21,14,0,1,14,2,0,10,12,10,1,2,18,10,43,8,44,42,7,60,0,2,2,2,16,23,3,6,26,197,64,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451759019942373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05820440544363546,0.060561147764098974,0.0,0.0,0.09898964486124172,0.07631914670076223,0.0,0.08222388474758739,0.07218101324005648,0.0,0.0,0.05989407025446305,0.06479215243734664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386566075084098,0.0,0.07638109313789304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812497126202442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387781252815122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530093849509653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752041228111597,0.0,0.09614474984311733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720474945559653,0.10399214121392067,0.1397658675592066,0.0,0.0,0.06190904076996673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13457311304066552,0.19013013182744395,0.0,0.08272832281887643,0.061046787360767976,0.116422161155399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25744647624868555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04878479892224692,0.0,0.2920284643433961,0.0,0.21502928925842846,0.0,0.0,0.1643259191345354,0.3930897474623579,0.0,0.07222573141197075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799990834226686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667404774954656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06111924909382688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734899135155333,0.17048474926106644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0561346079114476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947944987362491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989369461922254,0.0,0.0,0.1394116704146894,0.07404630730254258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280252930497984,0.0,0.13987964004706901,0.07483287453103385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18646842571636335,0.13846628301831834,0.0,0.14573662627560682,0.0,0.05799849486442439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471053240000324,0.060206711770402564,0.0,0.07283539612837273,0.0,0.06166865841219226,0.056031780873082686,0.0,0.08147442299010699,0.05151606397608752,0.0,0.0,0.06084970758537672,0.16674497913011566,0.07608842014627193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859695897609189,0.0,0.0,0.11700016878179274,0.06361540428206458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150876411637988,0.0,0.04244025536433089,0.0,0.0,0.06954711619741485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710982523129065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016000812894185,0.0,0.042929200781161365,0.11554325052244732,0.11676399725923403,0.0,0.06544050794662737,0.06747041559037772,0.0,0.08125943408389827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597353887128244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sb2433,2020/03/08,"I can’t connect in sex, does anyone else feel like this?:( So I’ll keep it as short as I can but yes as the title says I can’t connect during sex. It’s like I’ve felt excited and turned on before I have sex with the person imagining it etc but when it comes to it I just go completely numb every time. Like not to be to vivid but even when they are trying to really please me and physically aren’t doing a bad job it’s like I just feel nothing. It makes me sad I don’t know if something is wrong with me? I can watch porn and make myself orgasm in under a minute so I know I am capable. The only thing I could maybe think is the reason for this is my best friend at the time tried to have sex unwanted sex with me when I was asleep about 2 years ago now. I’ve kinda suppressed it like I do everything. Has unwanted sexual encounters done this to anyone else? I’m just confused I don’t know what to do",1.0151282051282071,2.7259853076923086,3.097564102564103,92.14993589743591,80.53846153846155,6.58974358974359,18.525641025641026,7.594959193182576,0.2921794871794874,705,15,163,11,18,239,110,195,0.114,0.701,0.185,0.9431,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,11,13,0,1,7,1,22,9,2,3,0,33,36,15,0,4,8,0,3,5,1,0,1,1,0,1,13,7,0,2,9,0,0,2,6,5,0,0,3,6,21,8,20,31,2,16,0,1,2,7,4,6,0,3,13,103,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261475402845253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19901025840786987,0.2916229220716158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188213155321327,0.0,0.0,0.12109370778680775,0.0,0.14934356651892594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258582345616535,0.14920733061038746,0.0,0.0,0.11362143454426105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453477337226765,0.14563059001531234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23776030643406176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871114393234628,0.0939931549403141,0.0,0.11990070815935862,0.0,0.127897340159394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391049793261793,0.10166493186205733,0.13663808857265816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10994688157535326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087697016587146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121882628766047,0.12648997394535125,0.0,0.0,0.23462642283118765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.347622736016766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18998351757784465,0.0,0.14296760944114936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654845570597346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823171927863788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425793991435095,0.0,0.15621155454358487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091166209986457,0.14631642355722607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316910937293735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095557244629392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454317525999112,0.09118528144946486,0.0,0.0,0.16596198979872287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19323571099602824,0.15479034310925646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559156253376094,0.0,0.09164174774993804
mentalhealth,randomuser2430,2020/03/08,"If you’ve ever self harmed please tell me why you did this? Did it help you feel better? I (F 24) have never suffered with serious anxiety or depression. I don’t understand the urge/need to self harm. I have recently discovered my sister (F 22) has self harmed and attempted suicide. She abuses alcohol to “self medicate”. 
Since finding this out and we had a good chat and cry about all of it. I have now found evidence that she used/uses drugs. I honestly don’t know if it’s ongoing. She says she hasn’t since our chat. I was angry and let her know I was disappointed and hurt. Did I do the wrong thing?
I understand she must be hurting more than I am. 
If you’ve ever self harmed please help me understand why this is a coping mechanism? What was going through your mind?
If you’ve used drugs or alcohol to cope please tell me how I can help my sister. I honestly can’t tell if she’s lying to me or if it’s really in the past. My head hurts. All I can think about is us as kids and now it is how it’s all ended up. It’s shit.",0.938131078224103,2.9954794325581418,3.0948520084566624,90.28033298097256,82.5813953488372,7.443974630021143,20.470401691331922,8.438071523408619,1.1340232558139542,798,23,179,19,22,271,112,215,0.23,0.644,0.126,-0.9825,0,0,4,0,1,1,26.0,3,3,0,2,8,17,1,0,5,0,25,7,2,3,7,38,35,18,1,7,9,2,1,0,0,1,5,1,0,6,13,9,2,0,9,2,0,1,5,13,0,0,8,2,33,4,14,24,4,12,0,6,0,0,30,3,1,9,8,116,46,0,0.0,0.10964407256506004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19779297950043567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079239785806818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184359089938524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165020015818237,0.0,0.0,0.0797040610479033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21463268014188394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196245300188174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16741439456356105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046790707846269465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457934723360208,0.0,0.0,0.10146469019878013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052592281131493716,0.07761766934599222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497213563375292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860816541981273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29719606754534555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171448283408936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462781980301377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932237232268867,0.0,0.0,0.09343842737873552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137210038570728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833934101662799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047414601101368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05928311774621576,0.0,0.09137150656358266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735910556903359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4826939506702032,0.0,0.09499037789191103,0.15309911786145056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122309836001657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24265057810643095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06147907423015365,0.05929551944402961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890103783672497,0.2226270401665656,0.07992434115788594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700485377775445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117732132746207,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustKam347,2020/03/08,"Anyone felt like this? For some reason, today and lately, I’ve been like not really hungry until I eat and then my stomach is growling but I’m not really hungry? And I don’t really like chewing? Has anyone felt like this and/or how to help with it? Any tips or suggestions are high appreciated and even just an “I get this too” is really helpful. Thanks guys 🙂",1.8475,4.384821971830989,3.992376760563381,82.24659330985915,82.80281690140845,6.930281690140845,17.325704225352112,8.07648339933343,0.8991816901408449,284,6,53,6,8,97,51,71,0.0,0.672,0.32799999999999996,0.9806,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,6,3,1,2,0,15,11,9,0,0,5,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,5,2,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,2,4,5,4,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,8,33,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281313317990498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27312161149700825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998443222415823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899617412873718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3750441333164921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203806087114577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933812520198038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26181574872796204,0.20634895756516636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22031094761105985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3816618605029405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5004659033112664,0.2008046103257966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980929867835566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851249597310804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JIMBOYKELLY,2020/03/08,"Is it normal to have a desire to hurt someone when you’re angry? Whenever I have a lot of anger stored inside me, all that’s on my mind is hurting the people around me, even when those people have nothing to do with what I’m angry about. I’ve never actually hurt anyone, and I’ve always let out that anger by throwing a pillow or slamming a chair on the ground. Is this something I should talk to a doctor about? Or is it normal to think about hurting people when you’re angry?",6.537142857142857,5.369066183673468,7.105020408163266,79.03283673469387,65.73469387755102,8.656326530612246,28.78367346938776,6.742157984588678,1.5189567346938784,378,9,74,2,5,125,60,98,0.27899999999999997,0.696,0.025,-0.9805,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,2,0,7,0,10,1,0,0,2,15,12,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,7,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,6,0,0,0,0,5,0,15,10,2,10,0,4,0,0,1,5,0,3,4,54,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.159181724965006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13572902264334202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405739368015115,0.0,0.0,0.1452115068811944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669603739061373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773931315937532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6984939286472137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16680139350290046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867890865365567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16470483971771974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580830696878972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196462043954897,0.1565181724145433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3392608962087926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382111641380563,0.12557785206603686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13110978857036076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452079834800833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,belmoid,2020/03/08,"i am finally getting better 2019 was the worst year of my life, it was horrible. it's 2020 now and idk what happened, but this year has been treating me really well so far. i guess it does get better",0.5909756097561001,2.963107121951221,2.573853658536585,91.21443902439024,87.53658536585365,6.206829268292682,20.39512195121951,7.554174236665415,0.8616497560975613,156,5,33,3,5,52,35,41,0.128,0.682,0.19,0.598,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,3,9,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,4,4,1,6,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,22,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5202803101641571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25740115347514003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3222125592628416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3073487447300078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3240249190379486,0.0,0.2601042590858552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20775756702368267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18843160808045054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644643668335537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3788289959270891
mentalhealth,jonspiev,2020/03/08,"Resource that provides affordable access to quality mental health care Grouport is a powerful new resource that offers quality mental health care from the comfort of home.

Grouport provides online group therapy delivered by expert therapists for a multitude of mental health challenges. Group members who all share the same condition meet weekly, showing one another they are not alone, and empowering each other to succeed in their therapy journeys.

Grouport is affordable, accessible from any device, and can provide the  skills, strength, and support needed to lead a better life.

If you, a loved one, or someone you know could benefit from this service, check out Grouport at the link below.  
[https://grouporttherapy.com/](https://grouporttherapy.com/)",14.120914454277283,15.253557920353987,10.969159292035403,49.96341445427728,49.4424778761062,13.197050147492629,49.80678466076697,12.45797560212912,7.005349262536873,627,35,70,16,6,184,82,113,0.0,0.728,0.272,0.9859,4,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,2,7,0,11,0,0,8,0,5,5,0,1,1,15,11,5,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,5,5,0,0,2,1,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,4,11,14,10,3,8,0,0,0,1,11,4,0,2,2,47,9,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851338080011265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407907645430677,0.16048600468322652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536006401914935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120888351791449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219776943701414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4880541733102398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15352137544202146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411213851199935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810356272723608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13813337238718273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4627144427402614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134844483266578,0.0,0.147816399642674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20742093943989406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967855421067673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17367903949919558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35005144887977396,0.177702552907906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276727545481407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spammymcpamface,2020/03/08,I'm done I've came to the realisation that I am probably never going to recover all I'm going to be able to do is 'manage' it I'm going to be like this for ever there is no cure there no quick fix what's the point in going on when I'm not getting better FML,-0.5730000000000004,1.035966366666667,3.4533333333333367,88.11500000000002,85.33333333333334,6.0,16.666666666666668,7.1686216300943375,0.013166666666666773,202,4,48,3,6,77,40,60,0.11699999999999999,0.84,0.043,-0.5116,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,0,3,5,17,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,8,13,1,12,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,5,32,5,1,0.2743464441430196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24263713531719616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31377924537296514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28075166340923485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24816206535770624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433346938328223,0.0,0.6236696260910572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403181483411514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115928906448977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593460663225529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29579186820090786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gitzemuz,2020/03/08,"Is my sleeping problem a serious problem So I don't know if I'm in a wrong sub, but I want to share my problem with sleeping, as it affects me every day.

Basically every night, I wake up,  about 8 times, I would say. Its like my mind tells me I HAVE to go to the bathroom or go to the kitchen and get something to eat, even if I don't have to pee or not are hungry - But it's like I can't stop my body from doing this. It kinda feels like I'm possessed, and can't control myself - The reason I'm saying this is because  I have some more extreme exambles of what have happened when I have woken up at night:

Examble 1: I woke up one night  and could suddently see one of my friends in the corner of the room. I started to chat with her for some time, and after a while I go to to the kitchen to get us something to drink. When I come back, she has disappeared.
Examble 2: I dreamed that I was on a trip with some friends, and unfortunately its a Place where people are infected with corona virus. So I decided to hide in different places. It turns out it was as said just a dream, and I have been sleepwalking around the house
Examble 3: I haven't even had a dream about it, but one night I wake up and is convinced that my ex boyfriend is in my home, and I start to look for him every place and room in the house. And after that I refuse to go back ti sleep, because Im sure he is there hiding.

I wanna now if you guys have experienced some similar things/know someone who has or if this is a serious issue. It has started to affect me so much, that Ive become afraid to go a
to sleep at night, and stay up longer just to try to avoid this. Keep in mind these are only things that happens at night. I can take nap during the day at weekends, and none of this happens.",3.939617812061712,3.945134642473121,5.055460495558673,87.6249298737728,70.85483870967741,8.189995324918186,28.001870032725574,7.893859768569023,1.4530417017297803,1365,44,312,16,23,452,176,372,0.08800000000000001,0.815,0.09699999999999999,0.7675,1,1,3,0,0,0,38.0,1,1,0,1,17,16,0,2,18,0,33,13,8,4,1,58,61,30,0,11,13,1,1,3,2,1,1,3,5,1,23,19,4,5,4,7,0,8,7,8,0,3,7,7,40,8,55,52,7,57,0,0,2,0,18,25,0,12,26,216,63,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133641484487073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123236485068677,0.0,0.09769811183707464,0.08850191245352461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901101552575919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690285055482826,0.0,0.0,0.08987730338442193,0.06398062682710552,0.0,0.0,0.10335984108126428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372316852635209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850099473464593,0.0,0.08199727765101412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585574798733777,0.0,0.20254952322560035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040518252131128515,0.05724787838632285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382294642013825,0.0,0.0837336093852908,0.0,0.22771052257194602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934544267512456,0.2125871877128808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803811221546299,0.0,0.0,0.1849281829096729,0.0,0.0,0.08655867181864718,0.08363927051743886,0.0,0.0712269463312861,0.0,0.0,0.08807930571171213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744854642391682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729253380770653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182536804984854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05890784696096539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4512030299173199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629029946729744,0.06094565932737851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0555549546368337,0.0,0.25116950557905626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300327805149028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239128938866606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622596129194552,0.12745184188508407,0.0,0.0,0.06385657111835437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207682312223469,0.0,0.06789743562961235,0.12338242254644285,0.0,0.0,0.17015816758951205,0.08541237992864882,0.0,0.06699576754603145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552552181912768,0.0,0.060250934940421885,0.0,0.07004081049441621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05323759235765303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345377638811292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054405852049382336,0.08716298309941717,0.0,0.0,0.09639155892140412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04726521902239628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05692502646922304,0.08761415255711208,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,greasyslimeballfuck,2020/03/08,"help i cant tell whats real or not anymore my delusions r getting worse 
i went to an auction the other day and i literally could not see myself in the mirror 
i dont know whats wrong with me",0.4847674418604662,2.0947397441860502,3.4211046511627927,89.68188953488372,81.7906976744186,5.230232558139536,22.377906976744185,5.985473137389443,0.2949581395348839,151,5,34,1,4,54,35,43,0.079,0.7879999999999999,0.134,0.2856,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,7,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,4,1,0,0,1,1,7,0,3,5,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,1,23,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101806414316068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497188548514268,0.0,0.0,0.20170872365933068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665603824253878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16340775391882373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20964100589013385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17188846412738826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3559971133181416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492346606341548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733719855042358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899379746288537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187361089110264,0.0,0.34196141754696263,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meghanjanette,2020/03/08,"Mental health especially bad today.. I’m drinking and have an assignment due for college...dont wanna do it. Feel very sad. Alone. Bored. Times like this i wish a friend would come knocking on my door and force me to get out. We’d have a heart to heart, she wouldn’t judge me. She’d just listen...and get my mind off it. Too bad im isolated and have no friends. Cant drive. Have past addictive traits so meeting people is hard...",-0.2305481727574729,2.0132513604651194,1.0754817275747506,98.29302325581398,99.34883720930232,4.317607973421929,16.60797342192691,6.1826913282559595,-0.366286378737541,331,9,73,4,14,104,67,86,0.209,0.6659999999999999,0.124,-0.8018,0,1,1,0,0,0,21.0,1,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,3,0,11,5,2,0,0,12,17,4,0,4,1,0,2,1,2,2,2,0,1,0,3,5,1,0,1,1,0,2,3,4,0,0,0,2,8,3,7,13,0,9,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,5,37,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060620491301192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19576994596972289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31565120710470457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628258489420559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22153255731819987,0.18516974993068772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557528079880914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920760953641611,0.0,0.1975125482559673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693267227030328,0.0,0.0,0.20092171116609292,0.0,0.4479843263930494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041763632317068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234667681410982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904898732574527,0.0,0.1908584918925048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18044303477916135,0.13104416182605458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022033836870547,0.0,0.1791709006918648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559630734694084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21736614915482333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427591525094007,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,turtletowel24,2020/03/08,"I’m distancing myself from my friends because my mental health is being affected, is this wrong? Trigger warning : mentions of abusive language and eating disorders 
F (18) here. Recently I’ve been in quite a bad place, mentally. Similarly, my friends have been expressing some of their insecurities. I’m not a small size by any means, in fact I am plus sized, and because of this I am rather insecure about how my body looks a majority of the time. I rarely wear any revealing clothing anymore as I’m usually repulsed by the way I look in them. 
My friends, however, are much much smaller than me and will wear skin tight clothing and I’m not saying in any way that this they are not insecure about themselves and aren’t allowed to feel that way because obviously everyone views themselves in a different way from the outside perspective. But it’s just the fact that every time I have ever gone out wearing something like that, people laugh in my face. My relationship with my weight and body isn’t good, and all my life I’ve had people - family members, friends, ex boyfriends etc... telling me to my face about my weight. Some even laughing about it. So obviously this is going to install negative thoughts and connotations in my head. 

Anyways. 

My friends often message me regarding this topic sending pictures of themselves captioned ‘I’m so fat’ ‘I look so fat’ looking for my approval, without any consideration that in some cases I am double their dress size. This really does make me feel bad about myself, and it does trigger me. Especially sometimes when people directly talk to me in depth and detail surrounding disordered eating (purging and binging specifically.) 

I haven’t got an eating disorder and sometimes I feel like I shouldn’t be allowed to feel triggered by topics of food and weight. But it does really affect my mental state sometimes and send me into a spiral. I don’t really know what’s wrong with me as I’ve not been diagnosed with any mental health issues, although I could name a few I would like to be checked out for. 

I feel really guilty for it but I am trying to distance myself from these people as I know that these conversations are not good for my mental health specifically. My issue is the fact they don’t think about what they’re saying, and although it sounds so selfish, I do need to think of my own mental stability first. 

I’ve been though some stuff in my life that has had a long term affect on me and my outlook on life and my mental health, so it just piles on top of that and I don’t really know what to do.

I feel wrong and incredibly selfish to say to them ‘hey would you be able to talk to someone else about this stuff? It easily triggers me and I don’t want to be upset’ 

Any advice would be appreciated please :)",6.64450215930902,7.266909042226491,6.817652951055668,75.18208403310943,65.10364683301344,9.813843570057584,33.93959932821497,9.751328689232952,3.261639587332054,2205,92,394,43,32,709,224,521,0.083,0.83,0.087,0.1523,5,0,1,0,0,0,50.0,0,1,6,4,23,23,0,4,13,0,41,26,11,11,7,86,69,37,0,8,12,1,11,3,5,5,10,4,0,0,30,27,9,1,15,0,1,4,15,11,0,1,9,20,60,12,64,48,13,39,0,0,5,0,28,21,0,5,12,267,90,0,0.058474742734695676,0.06928300827992201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05714084183910453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238588981463774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057991232160726026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764793538367024,0.10693698128439252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12990451398223452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04668732394053298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05935063299205137,0.0,0.061093660443189965,0.2010513635642721,0.0,0.15351492426440916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17950278015936294,0.04884814423973536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521479524935525,0.038622016087833326,0.052893752545732885,0.0492674927489553,0.055875122563049766,0.0,0.0,0.055124783331438734,0.0,0.17739952137656484,0.041774367893472636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049738586298295966,0.07070789102378712,0.0,0.2258872059197745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03323254384710268,0.09809167978096953,0.046767593534344516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06001195600948514,0.2486236684989466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220648783998228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964085680810602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390732029131675,0.08570341688048444,0.0,0.0,0.0517483072273625,0.19641622662744346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03903234483922815,0.0,0.0,0.0636961372963251,0.0,0.0,0.4125015108921163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597132820026651,0.043358280807002006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621560958219708,0.0,0.061093660443189965,0.06418770788701464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062195086696704524,0.0,0.0,0.1873020876360408,0.0,0.05773675400498545,0.06277999013549404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13950438728084522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049545459761395176,0.04501671377462259,0.17349904727974244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387918094319767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399956645252218,0.05110950252873956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493650807553312,0.05745113784435335,0.04642241403920184,0.06819418546005117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03970051193393623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440166787283956,0.0,0.03448991829326669,0.1856581160302628,0.0,0.21361945039034413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636756532018601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461633854919185,0.19179885498447,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jiminiesuga16,2020/03/08,"is it just me? The first time I've ever experienced this was when I maybe 12 or 13 (about a year or so after my mom died). I was at a friend's house with my younger sister and we were picking characters for a game that we were going to play. I remember we were talking and laughing and then I just (I don't know how to describe it) blacked out? but not as in lost consciousness, like I was there but I wasn't. All of a sudden I came to and I was so confused, I had no idea what was going on, or what had happened. I just look over and my sister and our friend were upset and getting on to me for something, and to this day I still have no idea what they were getting on to me about. My sister said that I got upset and was saying rude things to her because she picked a character that I wanted? But I'm not that kind of person, I never get upset over things like that. It's just so odd because I have NO memory of what had happened. This has happened more than once, but it only happens for a brief time when I do experience it. But it's not always the same thing, sometimes it just happens, and I'm not even doing anything in particular. I just don't understand what this is or why it happens. I've had a lot of emotional and physical trauma in my life. Is there something that maybe triggers this to happen?",3.2969131771033418,4.014560412408759,4.633480599308491,87.52828851325395,72.61313868613139,7.374260468689972,26.099884748367266,7.475848149327749,1.1664189781021896,1019,32,223,11,19,339,127,274,0.133,0.799,0.068,-0.9690000000000001,0,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,4,0,1,2,19,14,1,4,9,0,26,1,0,4,3,53,48,28,1,1,19,4,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,1,27,17,0,0,6,2,0,4,11,7,0,1,20,5,33,7,31,28,4,27,0,1,2,0,18,10,0,6,15,177,60,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733924869745799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637721196820843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279713210768694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200519421970907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769371055769591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089370484301808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180714431935601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932836090072278,0.09494680851317028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267586432930176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928313461777793,0.0,0.0,0.16219132320019233,0.0,0.16451956557931982,0.0,0.11930800237053495,0.0,0.08395006090913879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6497411233051407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111546183595312,0.0,0.2369853090406185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930484514918916,0.05768599259245804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413984983644226,0.10256114720341357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814412364839777,0.0,0.11458164454738945,0.08923744867610918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21090280522541344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293368326535364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095544192804413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178424827962873,0.0,0.07983057595864168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165134746921458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890482901197726,0.0,0.09984570616013523,0.08347234287861166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616142964693512,0.10381302155387936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382514631975073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436685248009178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20920215028276545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241181532712878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927221690301334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061911048284848225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471454299819064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675939877283097
mentalhealth,plasticcreative,2020/03/08,"Delusion and confusion and social withdrawal I had something bad happen to me a while ago. And then i got very sick, i started to forget how to fill up my gas in my car...i hate my coworkers now. The inly person i like anymore is my boyfriend. I got mad at him and when i was telling myself why i was mad i suddenly believed that he burned jewish people in the holocaust. Im very sad and confused . I forgot my boyfriends name and i find myself crying at work sometimes because i think life is very hard and unfair towards just me. I have no one i can tell because it's ridiculous. I dont want to be confused and i dont want to be crazy but i feel very sad that its happening.",1.3670714285714285,3.457904992857145,3.0599999999999987,90.93500000000002,81.21428571428572,5.428571428571429,25.0,6.5431188927421005,0.8642857142857143,529,21,110,5,14,175,88,140,0.272,0.7070000000000001,0.02,-0.9765,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,4,11,4,3,3,0,11,2,0,1,0,22,22,13,1,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,8,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,10,0,1,6,2,26,1,12,14,0,15,1,2,0,0,7,7,0,3,8,73,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319700109682228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14901818976790335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546136737634686,0.1831949966284332,0.0,0.0,0.16929229851248387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650542696675598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3522087282916784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597630008377805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373355130130298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403543387032551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657499952592424,0.0,0.13460402929256776,0.1483512845201454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16230728817382564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613354169143224,0.07340976422698511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182050604227523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417181597490582,0.13120180482100918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15317181114785675,0.0,0.1156779903796773,0.14861162621058435,0.0,0.10635526232020033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262668864343561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962809580420201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4959230952967386,0.17725525041650195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355868661760133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10939154368321727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sad-turkey,2020/03/08,"I’m broken I feel different to very one else. My life is perfect, but everything makes me sad/angry-stressed. It doesn’t matter what I do, the littlest thing can put me on the verge of tears. There is nothing in my life that I should be sad about, I know people who would envy what I’ve got, so I feel so ungrateful for feeling like this. I have close friends I can talk to but I hate feeling like a burden to them. 
I’m broken. May delete this post as I just needed a place to vent. Thanks for reading I guess

(Throwaway account)",1.3274812343619686,3.438081614678904,2.456196830692246,95.1020433694746,81.4770642201835,5.064553794829023,21.835696413678065,6.1124844417494595,0.16124954128440416,412,13,90,3,11,131,76,109,0.23600000000000002,0.589,0.175,-0.8946,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,5,8,1,0,4,0,11,2,0,1,1,17,24,5,0,3,3,0,4,2,1,3,2,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,5,1,1,1,1,3,0,1,1,4,15,5,11,19,0,7,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,2,2,56,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20213958841515176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162305057242204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388233205690914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3913059170238991,0.2764363264873241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14947785580905254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15473916670928975,0.0,0.21313388449081735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19101593314894605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632848062154897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733134070280125,0.18904365623012184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12914567671086954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14345882982189062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18564392259709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311032731416759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413080109572495,0.0,0.20213958841515176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18529501166641735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19449522859847101,0.0,0.0,0.19352677543829985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216242927247486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15550740891998366,0.0,0.1781252504588075,0.0,0.0,0.12853580671642192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15963665755343776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374386758593419,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1johnkillbride11000,2020/03/08,"how to cope ? I'm having trouble coping and understanding things . me and my sister were severely physically and emotionally abused by our parents ( mostly dad ) throughout our childhood , and now I have random memories popping up in my head of being beat or anything else that happened , everything . its heavily effected us and I cant seem to get away from it . any suggestions .?",5.7975897435897465,8.696295553846161,6.607307692307696,66.986858974359,70.38461538461539,9.871794871794874,35.44871794871795,10.125756701596842,4.644948717948718,301,16,43,9,6,99,56,65,0.13699999999999998,0.863,0.0,-0.8541,1,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,3,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,1,2,0,12,10,7,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,8,0,8,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,4,2,34,12,0,0.0,0.3099235306761706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778799288875401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21525388787046051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24575826651321644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185122976847545,0.29423660031125204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350866894911949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666210996615594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23130985544829605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26845135266207304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904480154006478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23812800117530125,0.0,0.295505227688412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737787670811438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723087373236242,0.31464244577136785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cailenrivers,2020/03/08,"I don't know if I'm having panic attacks, can you help? Everything I have read and heard about panic attacks is that they tend to be something very obvious to the person experiencing them. Sometimes it's hyperventilation, a pain in your chest, etc. I'm not experiencing that, but I don't know what to call what I am experiencing.

It's like a physical feeling that life is bad. I don't mean the thought ""life is bad"" I mean the actual visceral biological feeling that I feel pointless, unloved, and life is hopelessly exhausting and unrewarding. It feels like I want to cry, but I don't end up crying. It doesn't go away when I stop thinking about it. It just sits in my chest and throat and my body feels a little bit shaky or anxious. 

I'm not hyperventilating. I could have a normal conversation if I wanted to. I'm able to go on with my day, but I just feel really horrible internally. 

Does this sort of thing have a name, or am I just weird and unable to process my emotions in a healthy way?",4.3978970268310364,5.556256741116755,6.0105474981870906,77.0327030456853,70.42131979695432,9.283393763596813,29.299854967367658,9.606745405546679,2.565052501812908,786,30,160,18,14,269,107,197,0.23600000000000002,0.669,0.095,-0.9849,0,0,1,0,0,1,24.0,0,2,2,0,6,14,2,3,9,0,18,9,4,0,1,40,40,14,0,6,12,0,6,2,0,0,5,1,0,1,14,7,0,1,12,1,0,2,7,12,0,0,2,10,22,2,17,36,2,15,0,1,0,0,10,7,0,6,6,100,36,2,0.12274077588173098,0.0,0.11977729169078895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866213997350904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27927070399839377,0.11531899932015613,0.0,0.20496684195122344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400113768060706,0.13633733207737575,0.0,0.0,0.1253320554166838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979985220337294,0.0,0.2696499576865237,0.07915764635267553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741128010959523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380668524101653,0.10871189603881,0.0,0.1368884101669532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031149499158324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723685454008455,0.08768603481467525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395128229917558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227055480900983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349102409520001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26008631964375445,0.11992988643949495,0.12301850259229667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674013752532979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025990002982084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060483940630607,0.28801970903935903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071725111675014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277399127883964,0.0,0.0786308839870273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449184584551452,0.12139376582054462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026167846052564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154351756794424,0.07864733312970261,0.0,0.09744246577238487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127399455636307,0.14479137943778395,0.0974259147820665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the-late-night-snack,2020/03/08,"Please help I've been heartbroken for over 4 years and I feel like I'm getting pushed to my limit I've been heartbroken over a girl for 4 years, we never dated but I know her really well as she was my friend as well. Today at this point in time, I've literally been betrayed harshly by every single person I know at least once, including my own family, and my best friend who literally grew up with me.

Everyone literally takes what advice and support I can give them and leaves until they need me again. Even when I had a GF at a point when I thought I was over the other girl, she cruelly manipulated me to such a breaking point that I don't even trust anyone to use my phone to call someone because I think they're going to steal it from me. She often threatened to suicide if I left her and kept thinking everything I say is a lie. 

I just don't know what to do, I even went to school therapy and it was bad because I already knew everything he was going to say. I tried multiple hotlines and they are either dead-ends or just make me feel worse. I don't have any serious mental condition/illness to my knowledge either.

I am financially in a terrible place as well. My school money is blocked for a stupid reason, and I can't find a job to fit my schedule. I can't even date anyone because I simply can't afford anything.",4.866523070194624,5.2804591598513015,6.065934834900506,79.75627378088781,68.92565055762083,9.154690575114804,29.578176251913405,9.168548406835145,2.3686123332604425,1050,37,210,19,17,353,150,269,0.196,0.6779999999999999,0.126,-0.9793,2,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,1,0,3,2,15,14,1,0,9,0,21,0,0,4,1,38,42,17,1,2,7,0,2,1,3,0,0,2,0,3,8,10,0,3,12,0,1,5,7,5,3,0,12,4,42,9,30,30,6,33,0,0,0,0,23,15,0,3,13,142,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076138081729062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215267292296053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488942542973574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15400525586387712,0.0,0.09062427720176992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195057203083824,0.20139527910582533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557039500061075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11245091234910354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09753890855872584,0.0,0.0,0.2909486172590927,0.0,0.09278586634713837,0.10523006885458046,0.19794821385728006,0.0,0.10381694892956153,0.0,0.11136598300469493,0.07867400388833731,0.0,0.0,0.10065312729946764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17016607851184098,0.0,0.05753626593729586,0.10564285032777804,0.12517423557496007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381510593584797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928301711288828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18156703362742008,0.0,0.0,0.11660748486713685,0.11965217177221825,0.0,0.0,0.05380197868457818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735099297608327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098106022002026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165699984977395,0.08493592514862723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728054740425145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615773570027754,0.1150581833222978,0.12088522782113745,0.3123138685278097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054950637936082,0.11322782266246695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751531582773634,0.0,0.2229066905659961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330936386296652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12045992004097165,0.12496962809804912,0.0,0.0,0.08280101242863162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259386265257738,0.0,0.0,0.14112852988576546,0.0,0.08742770667265662,0.06421532966970847,0.0,0.10438652816196964,0.0,0.0,0.07476829423785297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951134662067333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2970493760325734,0.10208786311238192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122277559437843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14183500813427394
mentalhealth,Bomber-Boy,2020/03/08,"I have a question Is it being greedy to wanting/ needing to feel seen and heard. If this isn’t the right subreddit to ask these questions can somebody refer me to the right one, thank you.",3.831261261261261,5.637461135135138,3.890270270270271,89.1382882882883,72.78378378378378,6.014414414414415,28.54954954954956,6.42735559955562,1.2503765765765769,150,6,29,1,3,46,31,37,0.062,0.87,0.068,0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,12,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,3,1,4,9,0,2,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,3,0,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784629698165996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506091712930613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22086265026069266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018406005393445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6673525099946431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5087490754354059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742334852690869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756881181574768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Letstalkshallwe,2020/03/08,"This feeling of guilt won't leave me I don't know how or when it started but I do know it's been there with me for a long time now, only now I know and recognise this feeling, that is, guilt.
I feel guilty about leaving home, meeting friends.
I feel guilty about being home, not living my life, wasting it away.
I feel guilty about not being with the people I love whenever they want me to be there.
I feel guilty about not being able to be there for everyone.
I have to come to terms with this feeling, I know that yet I am unable to.
I want to be carefree but I can't be. I want to love myself, find time for myself but all my time is spent with the people I love because I don't know when it will be the last time I see them.

If there's any other way to not feel this way, please let me know.",1.5615288220551378,2.8549079473684245,2.6987176274018405,97.46907894736843,77.71345029239765,5.353550543024227,19.816624895572268,5.288315135182226,-0.4506076858813701,613,13,148,2,14,196,78,171,0.12,0.6759999999999999,0.204,0.9284,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,0,14,6,0,2,4,0,20,4,0,1,1,35,44,9,0,4,9,0,8,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,11,6,0,0,15,0,1,1,8,2,0,0,2,9,27,4,21,31,2,17,0,0,1,3,7,1,0,2,13,104,38,0,0.12074915076866087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082113563187503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344780196613713,0.0,0.0,0.07360756155547815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401470152670284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538098815063072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4884351898773364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036253624724576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329049435264812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24224248700986936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3981634523961188,0.09842667405092682,0.0,0.25571183172601963,0.0,0.12347418766621734,0.08528869616453805,0.0,0.0,0.10662371235572153,0.1068591986760846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269424687909534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918351703246907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742451481404091,0.0,0.0,0.1325463072545527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622143971737128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546687040652642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816392034086167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136629328779276,0.1916901109396596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Reggby,2020/03/08,"Constant battle in my mind Hey guys, its my first post here and English is not my first language so sorry for any mistakes. So a little description beforehand Where I'm from to get into a good collage (which is a medical university for me) it's useful to have private teachers in the subjects that you'll need to pass in order to go to that university. The teacher that I have is pretty well known in my area and has pretty tough tests in biology. Through my childhood I've always passed every test, I was always one of the smartest kids in class but once I started getting older I kinda stopped caring since everyone knew me as the smart kid. Now with the tests and the fact of graduating I feel my mind splitting two ways all the time. I always know that I should study hard and better for good grades and a better score but I also don't want to stop the comfort of scrolling through the Internet and playing. I reassure myself that everything will be fine. I beat myself up every day for doing this because I know I shouldn't be procrastinating but I can't help myself to stop. And so far the comfort has always won over the dedication. Anyways about my teacher, for the last couple of months we've had these tests that are pretty hard. Every single before the date of the test I don't study as much as how much I know I should be and I always get very sad when I get the lowest point in the group.its like my mind is in a constant battle between what I should be doing vs what I am doing and I just can't stop myself. Sorry for this being too long and I know that my problem isn't as serious as dome of the others but I hope somebody red this.
Thanks for listening to me  and have a great day🙂",4.002105263157893,5.24632129239766,4.926486549707602,84.10769473684212,71.45614035087719,7.226385964912281,26.54549707602339,7.554174236665415,1.3863018479532163,1350,44,266,15,25,440,174,342,0.08199999999999999,0.7,0.218,0.9946,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,6,14,24,2,0,23,0,32,1,0,2,2,48,53,26,0,9,7,0,3,1,0,6,1,1,0,3,17,13,0,4,7,1,0,3,7,7,1,4,4,5,40,17,43,38,4,41,0,1,1,0,8,16,0,2,20,191,57,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480922671591234,0.3891915567841054,0.0,0.0,0.06361493368507587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05702517300801443,0.0,0.07960131391084589,0.0,0.0,0.16546882984624128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537704998031016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20218140337197424,0.0,0.0,0.10350759517717667,0.0,0.12065970792903828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364512760265551,0.08938783831558267,0.08407370216389791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04729999985287611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591414749940215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19549706629927774,0.0,0.0531647201823728,0.15692499291560622,0.0,0.10313551808915868,0.0,0.09262589646547156,0.0,0.0,0.16759885803110794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06270235139501175,0.0,0.0,0.09291293657790478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20564318192811332,0.0762530098504509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045702170720438175,0.0937583245370992,0.0,0.08278584649769583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423841394756467,0.0,0.0,0.28336636512026186,0.0,0.0746680480427781,0.0,0.13753511101957333,0.06936365982991026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962413522147892,0.06338963486651401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843182652877525,0.0,0.08959183741680993,0.2855117382396219,0.0,0.08951151569338063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738276022788819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20943564441758367,0.06621280434228695,0.0,0.0,0.31283677141996696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612519212154451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05454780718456108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09138148969723672,0.0,0.0,0.08079427516740657,0.0,0.07718578789934395,0.05517624120532946,0.07425298100671854,0.0,0.0,0.08410967791990444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EvaBraunn,2020/03/08,"Life with cyclothymia? First of all, I'm sorry if my writing is clumsy, I've had migraine today so my brain is still a bit ""laggy"".

I'd really like to hear what it's like to live with cyclothymia. I've never heard anyone else having it, so I'd really like to hear how everyone else are coping with it. **To everyone not familiar with cyclothymia, it's a mental disorder with periods of symptoms of depression and periods of symptoms of hypomania.**

I got diagnosed with cyclothymia about a year and a half ago, but I haven't gotten any support or help from the professionals (at least yet, I have an appointment to a psychiatrist next week, and I've been waiting for it for *months*). All the information I know, I've found online myself.

I do go to therapy, but the reason I started to go to therapy was depression, since three years ago it was my official diagnosis. So, my therapist is a bit confused since she hasn't gotten any information about my new diagnosis from the doctors. My therapy is ending in a few months and I'm really worried, since my therapist has been my only professional support these years. The government agrees to pay for my therapy bills for three years, then I'm supposed to have a five-year break until I can get that benefit again, and I'm really worried, I have no idea how I'm supposed to keep it together alone.

So yeah, first I got diagnosed with moderate depression. Later it turned out that I didn't have depression, but it was cyclothymia. I had only noticed the symptoms of depression, since the hypomanic symptoms can feel ""good"" and I often mix those symptoms with feeling good and ""normal"". I got the diagnosis and I was left alone with it. ***I hope I could find some people with the same condition and hear their stories and how they manage to live their life with cyclothymia.***",3.4428056937060525,6.0200045247813465,4.92633596295661,77.71147616189333,76.63848396501456,8.70001714971703,28.16403704338878,9.325443323948027,2.9912281598353627,1444,62,254,40,34,482,155,343,0.142,0.779,0.079,-0.9733,0,2,0,0,0,0,55.0,0,0,3,2,13,15,0,1,18,1,26,12,1,4,3,53,54,24,0,4,6,0,2,3,0,0,11,4,0,0,15,22,0,2,9,0,2,2,6,6,0,5,16,6,30,9,41,37,8,32,0,5,0,0,12,4,0,6,28,171,45,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261753086924164,0.0,0.0,0.14742071311908153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679568749478344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04976351645647355,0.07292177899620209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15539778244708444,0.0,0.0,0.07944893430877864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0568232228125972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3064918374337172,0.14447151637440872,0.0,0.0,0.0815666542460269,0.07284521455712463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890632188094015,0.0,0.06303523933623267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601141685162554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197108821849489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504782617535902,0.121073839023698,0.0,0.07803391426937854,0.0,0.0,0.03718323638701534,0.0,0.0808947733247083,0.11938755331866073,0.1707627572226643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24064030903904385,0.0,0.047703556847718,0.0,0.0,0.0706875811404595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034194050365451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06325890886597108,0.0,0.0,0.0391130117180653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732609884824332,0.0,0.10053854272440817,0.10430977709075086,0.0,0.12568831676627115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172232902878828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361396806564325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054890468317723415,0.06873615002097876,0.07568979466656381,0.0,0.06973120566515466,0.0,0.08102718727133651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825554394078273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049340116254302485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18237255615787776,0.07317431583471012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354892803498955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796686643095132,0.050374287498257904,0.0,0.056836222849385526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615250884661615,0.0,0.3698628987433349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32555506646658644,0.16526703891199954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674605640292404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774122082775614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05708804898325196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455259162625714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291548013021271
mentalhealth,Bolthorn88,2020/03/08,"Alien delusions and Paranoid thoughts Hello, I am 18 years old and I am experiencing some of the worst thoughts. When I was like 16 on History TV on the show called ""Ancient Aliens"" I heard some dude saying that ""aliens could be among us, it could be your son, your mother or your grandfather, you wouldn't know"" or something like that. That remained in my mind, but I'm not just suspecting that aliens might be among us, but everyone except myself is an alien, that includes you, that read this. I know it's crazy, because I realise this myself, but I don't know how to escape this. I have good grades, and I am appreciated by people around me, but I hide this dark secret, that influence my focus, and take most of my time thinking if it's true or not. I considered doing psychoterapy but I am thinking that the psychoteraphist is an alien that wants to fool me that everything is alright and all other around me are people, just like me (which I know it's true). 


Some advice from people who suffered from this kind of things? (or not) Like I am struggling so hard, right now, when I write this I am thinking that all replies (if there are going to be so) are going to be written by aliens to fool me (I don't know why, because I don't find a reason for why aliens would have an interest in me)

Thanks for your attention!",6.025148005148008,5.98234883783784,5.814270270270272,84.13095495495497,66.4131274131274,8.759948519948521,29.62187902187902,8.238735603445708,1.8343804890604885,1035,32,212,12,15,322,127,259,0.099,0.769,0.132,0.8508,0,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,2,6,0,0,11,16,0,1,7,1,29,0,0,3,4,57,47,21,0,7,17,2,1,4,0,3,0,2,0,0,25,7,0,0,15,3,0,2,7,5,0,0,5,4,37,11,23,32,7,18,0,1,0,0,17,9,0,11,11,156,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278590965061676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329575351365335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595223937911057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360620071310253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20893633573463166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250269064673423,0.11759401608637435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958890903993045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487231512219084,0.10974561406429936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721038981337473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625373563730767,0.35954179222067045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255694784959248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13880464843655194,0.13211498974764382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729861093179804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27213195374962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13087925883457413,0.0,0.0,0.1345292704605588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173993351967304,0.0,0.10405228170888108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072998866742272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367864019245905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837829195590378,0.0,0.0,0.12046343823469652,0.0,0.0,0.08692684037466836,0.25151836872241684,0.0,0.20775080400112614,0.07629610152093637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147780838598285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717509314906043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361324474696373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929477173943346,0.0,0.0,0.08425914992179878
mentalhealth,TheOriginalMosen,2020/03/08,"Train of thoughts hit me hard today I was just chilling in my sofa, and it suddenly hit me, while looking at the big pile of stuff I'll soon be moving to my new apartment; I don't do well on my own. 

I was supposed to be a dad. Lost twins, and it's been almost 7 years. Sometimes I imagine them running around... But they're not. 

I need someone around me. I need someone to share the good things with. I need someone to hug in the morning, and cuddle at night. I need someone to care for, someone to love. 

And here I sit by myself, moving out of a place 'we' moved into together, starting over yet again, on my own. 

Life hurts so bad, and the dark loneliness is messing with me so bad. It's hard to break the cycle, and get back on track. Guh. I am getting beat, hard. I know I'll get back up at some point.. but I just can't see it right now.

I need someone to give me a proper hug, and say everything is going to be ok. 

Just needed to get that out of my system right now..",0.59368932038835,2.3913534660194173,2.403699029126216,96.17467475728157,82.3009708737864,4.8966990291262125,20.97961165048544,5.6839178017228535,-0.12225747572815493,738,22,172,4,20,244,116,206,0.086,0.8270000000000001,0.087,0.6251,0,0,0,0,2,0,35.0,1,0,1,2,16,13,0,0,8,1,12,5,0,0,0,32,34,12,0,6,6,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,7,15,0,0,3,0,0,5,3,5,1,0,5,6,26,8,33,24,3,43,0,2,2,4,7,21,0,2,14,114,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056954804720758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788140480524178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445417891270682,0.16771539699658766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239855045743104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902630688928856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098892365811169,0.09634487416039224,0.0570786188425179,0.08423877551474912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26990581262865376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751603781616376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519557311019724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093908448342125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433876583247846,0.0,0.10963492616626884,0.0,0.09064506965861012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202344471980275,0.0,0.4468205856107807,0.0,0.09699920888587822,0.0,0.09424994752970046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493153260174136,0.0,0.09494203115654104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715391591008238,0.0,0.07986867516670293,0.0,0.0,0.08003242103805466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5105813914413061,0.0,0.09933120612917706,0.0,0.0710872813509264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497222083213306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672349191319701,0.0,0.0,0.0797329054580986,0.0,0.0,0.09519912505769224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903016931244742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467582031266765
mentalhealth,dbella703,2020/03/08,It’s been 18 months since I’ve self harmed! Just wanted to share that with everyone here <3 recovery is possible,4.194545454545455,6.632443000000002,4.2545454545454575,84.1518181818182,73.54545454545455,9.854545454545457,24.63636363636364,10.125756701596842,2.696018181818182,94,3,18,3,2,29,22,22,0.14400000000000002,0.763,0.09300000000000001,-0.2942,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42985105285584657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3590660616779217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5071384017254934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4692917677686814,0.0,0.0,0.3721206551546132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26533324691223026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EmanuelsThrowaway,2020/03/08,"Is this a mild depression? Hey guys,
I've been having a rough time lately since I've lost a lot of things that had meant a whole lot to me, so I've been feeling kind of empty. Now, this feeling of emptiness has a cause, so I'm not too worried about that. Back when I was working and had everything that I've lost recently though, I was experiencing some of the same feelings. It almost felt like I was in a constant state of ""waiting"", I've been feeling overwhelmed by the smallest of things and have neglected simple household chores like doing the dishes and cleaning the floor etc. I've been wondering if I'm just a lazy person or if this nagging feeling of being overwhelmed could be something else. As a freelancer/entrepreneur, I've always had the feeling of not doing enough, not accomplishing things that are trivial and shouldn't pose as challenges. Right now I'm planning on building everything up once more, but even now I'm just so extremely stressed. I want to get out of this state of self pity and do things that will get me out of it, but I keep procrastinating and feeling like I couldn't. I've heard that meditation and physical activity could help in such scenarios, but I'm even procrastinating on those. So... Am I just a lazy dickhead or is there something wrong with me? Can I help myself or should I seek medical attention?",8.154588550983899,7.2533234689922494,7.791860465116283,74.54696779964225,62.37209302325582,10.729159212880145,37.28801431127013,9.851270322608157,3.4952536672629684,1077,45,202,18,13,342,134,258,0.145,0.747,0.10800000000000001,-0.9247,1,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,6,19,15,1,3,14,0,29,2,0,1,0,50,52,23,0,8,14,0,9,3,0,3,1,1,2,3,17,10,1,3,11,0,0,0,5,10,0,0,15,11,13,5,25,29,8,20,0,7,0,0,7,9,0,10,12,142,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923137135766827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907575023271616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155745412637367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12231765444405035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867233289758662,0.0,0.1901353581266089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025547872663484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946767789338733,0.0,0.0,0.12303110431678295,0.1327944868470446,0.15728917917388793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21402481558331435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4214374673371276,0.08506360752283737,0.1143258400525532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441828563768464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789798652267774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15962017668492995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583485674155987,0.0,0.1239930466397746,0.0,0.0,0.13431610800403304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17451471283726508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599578669552129,0.20245805427214175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995046397904728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680562779820162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039673015943412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756722674647806,0.0,0.0,0.10168510040202154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242159427635292,0.0,0.0,0.09849590633474814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18333175416357356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639424379146414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164191784514503,0.0,0.11698563707282594,0.0,0.06943065472715118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023055096069059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329373648383982,0.0,0.0,0.1291262989743885,0.08668435338598658,0.12092133029673377,0.0,0.0,0.13018431593693314,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cthaven,2020/03/08,Mental health related podcast? I think the title says it all. I have gotten really into podcasts lately and want to check out some more mental health related ones. Either if its a whole mental health podcast or just episodes,5.0005000000000015,7.993790050000001,5.125000000000004,76.13000000000002,73.5,7.0,25.0,8.07648339933343,2.0682499999999995,182,6,26,3,4,57,33,40,0.0,0.965,0.035,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,11,4,3,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,3,3,5,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,1,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6497255909505647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298372560899599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6159918943253709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13806530076266735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305265480800263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620290368321204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305538535063857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017618263631155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274779966478029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lilpossum420,2020/03/08,"My emotions feel like my uncontrollable evil power My emotions control me. I feel like I cannot control them though people around me say I can control them. When I feel, as I call it an episode, coming I try everything to stop it. Smoking weed calms it down most time but lately that doesn't seem to be the case. I've been lashing out on others around me who I care for the most. I have been diagnosed with PTSD as well as Generalized anxiety disorder and depression. I once watched a video by a youtuber who has CPTSD and described feeling like a trapped animal constantly and that's how I feel. Like I have to lash out before I get hurt again. Though that is the trauma mind talking. I am in a good place. I am going to community college and have a very supportive family and therapist. She is aware of these feelings I have spoken about it before. Advice is always welcome for I'm willing to try new things. I wanted to vent because this site is anonymous. Thanks for reading. I hope you all have a good day and remember to take care of yourself. You deserve it.",3.799377828054297,5.6396310192307695,4.6125339366515865,83.78540723981905,72.94230769230771,7.5864253393665155,29.062217194570128,8.313332769828598,2.1244911764705887,844,35,161,14,17,272,127,208,0.127,0.67,0.203,0.9493,1,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,2,4,9,19,1,1,10,0,19,1,0,4,1,33,37,14,0,2,1,0,6,4,0,1,1,1,0,0,14,12,0,4,8,2,0,2,2,5,1,0,2,8,28,14,25,33,3,19,0,2,1,0,11,9,0,4,12,112,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366770933120427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882734961621564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115682885920251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888811566714224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467010014636124,0.0,0.18054570186653726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832744136983896,0.0,0.21632703764087807,0.0,0.0,0.09138519225848646,0.0,0.1146431559441287,0.3569592554940105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841781430724414,0.0,0.0913732129093421,0.1076768204950091,0.0,0.0,0.12158573825537387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23866885147388145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534481794295464,0.0,0.10001007740558623,0.0,0.3218468861439632,0.3031564036434351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05542646426569048,0.0,0.0602921060487465,0.17796272193497795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536906065223406,0.0,0.0,0.11356911721774993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11967158882532085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20731643949463896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711837272206214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246019801087916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297997817318688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354787953286136,0.0,0.11083910612723244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240108880759399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611644640936124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201767260880517,0.0,0.0,0.08436522695844746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657829189869624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869409889536968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203871073875722,0.0,0.0,0.07976477586397639,0.08526930491939706,0.0,0.09767133540905007,0.0,0.12317604001989482,0.07047997887742324,0.0,0.20846132703349435,0.0,0.06186061290676297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14405322004376706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753349389443922,0.06257329625193686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538561669236756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunshash,2020/03/08,"Stopped feeling things. So I recently realised how I stopped feeling things, I don't feel happy or sad anymore. The moments that I enjoy passes by so quickly that I can't hold onto them and just like that, they are gone. I don't feel sad either. Anxiety and fear are the only two emotions that I feel. Idk how to go about this.",2.410454545454545,4.4052267121212125,3.5393939393939418,89.27909090909094,77.33333333333334,5.612121212121212,27.66666666666667,6.42735559955562,1.1854121212121216,257,11,51,2,6,83,43,66,0.268,0.611,0.121,-0.8624,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,0,7,6,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,2,0,15,12,7,0,0,3,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,3,5,0,0,3,3,3,0,1,1,5,9,3,4,11,1,9,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,6,38,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17433330256538696,0.0,0.2260031503096425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563427482431232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256436777552332,0.5761337993216916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951370961445188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24259046574476786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11133431431845373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17331870164000646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250113992683307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38104828381888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027966384383109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22261295987612445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MahaAgro,2020/03/08,"Survey for Mental Health Diagnosis using Sentiment Analysis Hello everyone. I hope you guys are doing well. I and my colleges from Mehran University of Engineering and Technology are conducting research on depression in which we use Artificial Intelligence to diagnose depression through social media posts. We are targeting the Twitter forum specifically. To train our Machine Learning model we need substantial data from users currently suffering from depression.

If any of you are willing to help us out with our research you would have to fill a survey form and provide your Twitter handle. With your permission, we will scrape Tweets from your Twitter profile dating back a month. You can read more about our project and policy in detail over [here](https://sites.google.com/view/identifydepressionsocialmedia/privacy-policy):

[Here](https://sites.google.com/view/identifydepressionsocialmedia/survey-form) is the survey form. [This](https://sites.google.com/view/identifydepressionsocialmedia/home) video explains our project in more detail, please check it out

Please do participate in this survey and forward it to other people. Your participation will help us out tremendously",13.30380392156863,16.628866223529414,10.61970588235294,44.1570098039216,51.470588235294116,13.196078431372552,41.22549019607843,12.45797560212912,6.625843137254902,998,46,105,32,12,298,109,170,0.08,0.8059999999999999,0.114,0.4549,1,0,0,0,0,0,50.0,10,8,0,0,3,6,0,0,4,0,13,3,0,2,0,22,18,6,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,5,14,0,0,2,2,1,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,21,2,25,14,4,16,0,4,0,0,24,10,0,2,5,80,26,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476392834362505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976753973995306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43606331868094506,0.17128984959976692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161259296787536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16710088542026172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17938608502216974,0.0,0.0,0.22623518553355365,0.0,0.0,0.1676187174604256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700723749648734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470419630650468,0.0,0.0,0.12513486417795214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169983025654953,0.0,0.0,0.3704999349069452,0.0,0.0,0.161627319465219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688076418114864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17203157819096526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4059997474273507,0.29151231853166754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15173728070819073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988366319318755,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pleaseimsohungry,2020/03/08,"I think I may be suffering from OCD and I don't know what to do Okay so, I haven't been exhibiting typical OCD behavior like excess organization or cleaning, but I have been connecting numbers and colors with good and bad connotations and I think it's been taking a serious toll on my life. It all started out with learning the lucky and unlucky things tied to my Chinese zodiac, the rabbit. The rabbit's lucky colors are purple, red, blue, and black and unlucky colors are white, yellow, and brown. Its lucky numbers are 3,4,6,9 and unlucky numbers are 1,5,7,8. Even just typing those numbers out kind of fill me with anxiety. I know it's irrational but it feels like whenever something bad happens I see those numbers somewhere. I've been checking the clock before I do anything now, whenever I'm about to make a decision I check the time to see if there are any unlucky or lucky numbers. When I write I count how many lines I made, when I set the volume on the TV i make sure it's 34 or 33 despite being way too loud, I avoid anything associated with white and yellow and try to stick with things that are blue or red, etc etc. Everytime I try to hammer in the idea that what I'm doing is harmful and force myself to stop avoiding ""unlucky"" things I always ALWAYS go back to my self-destructive ways because of some sort of coincidence. like Today and yesterday, for example, are the only two days I'm not going to have my medication this month and that fact has been really getting to me it's been making me feel like maybe I shouldn't seek out rational help because whatever forces are behind this weird number thing know more than me, like I don't know I don't know how to explain it. i keep connecting things I know I shouldn't be but I can't help it it's so ingrained in me now. I don't know what to do and I'm not sure if a lot of this even makes sense. I haven't gone to a therapist for this because the mental health organization I go to is absolutely horrendous. It isn't run in the right way at all, I just go to refill and my meds and that's it. There is no other local organization I can go to that takes my insurance though.",4.164669524024362,5.375002226107231,5.2653718324686105,81.96073764944735,71.02797202797203,8.425926761410633,28.05782389653357,8.841846274778883,2.0973171065493648,1701,61,339,31,31,562,197,429,0.087,0.7979999999999999,0.114,0.8933,0,2,1,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,0,0,18,22,0,2,15,1,39,3,0,7,5,80,74,33,0,4,13,0,2,5,0,3,3,1,1,0,32,25,0,4,15,1,2,8,13,8,0,1,8,19,42,14,40,60,7,36,0,1,16,0,4,11,0,14,18,222,74,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15607866040735485,0.0,0.0,0.06377922040185209,0.0,0.07174774808955436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15435946306820578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211736856287483,0.15661852834305826,0.17151732464598074,0.0,0.07980688574368353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060485656903503326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20919736229990907,0.12389249803493425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948443059159202,0.1340046770314269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049000485252184915,0.0,0.26651009516888285,0.07866512727397171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293663227785787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969251505052612,0.0,0.0,0.12572856270303795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587550878588928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336329841473318,0.0,0.09766602106926148,0.3608049535382049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624540866706095,0.2291009870144472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973540908156779,0.0,0.08874470187613145,0.2504175180961785,0.09508655630301073,0.0942228946511818,0.0,0.10417759333609114,0.09448178635597253,0.09451648827036366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748608796272888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133018397223186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060083149133422324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009464584853643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14947417144971092,0.0,0.09784159041051753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220277043769552,0.0,0.0,0.06638380010702029,0.0,0.0,0.07841116951002486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17678861547854596,0.0,0.14103417113640487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088953771881412,0.31154370130869635,0.12019143638668675,0.0921464711513146,0.0,0.0546886778831624,0.0,0.08890028663489903,0.0,0.0,0.12735211920515274,0.0,0.091617484047098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22333422201930525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RavenWhisperingOne,2020/03/08,"Can Buspar harm creativity and normal functioning. Every psych meds I've ever taken has been bad for me some how. The antipsychotics walled my creativty and made me spasm. Anti anxiety meds made me in a hell state where I was to fatigued. to do things but couldn't sleep like I was trapped in my body. Zyprexa rip van winkled me. And Prozac gave me a luckily temporary psychosis.

Anyways the one I'm still on is Buspar. I've been in it for a while and it's Ben a while since I got to be med free(not since my eating disorder diagnosis in 2017). I don't really believe in psychiatry over much at this point and think meds are more just for mental conditioning pills to make us more compliqnt cogs in the corporate machine. And I can't help but think Buspar is affecting me some how. And screwing up my life. 

I can't seem human properly had to drop out of college and can't hold a job so live with parents. Cause of random anxiety attacks and can't seem to handle stress and just get overwhelmed. Also my spacy daydreamness went from mild to hard to control. And it's made it hard for me to Handel things in real life. Also bad BDD. Also my thought s have been scattering and looping of late. And I can't help but wonder if I stopped this last med if I could be even more creative than I am and be better at problem solving. And fix my problems and be human again instead of a failiure.

I'm thinking of stopping the Buspar but was wondering if anyone else who took this med experienced a reduction of creativity and thinking. Can't seem Of I find much of this med online.  If so I'm definitly stopping it more than I already want to.",3.0252809706258006,5.1066511790123466,4.282056194125161,84.26166666666667,75.79012345679013,7.308471690080888,27.221796509152828,8.216663640201805,1.915002894848872,1298,52,251,23,29,426,170,324,0.18600000000000005,0.7440000000000001,0.07,-0.9876,2,1,0,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,0,2,16,13,3,2,11,0,28,9,2,9,1,64,52,34,0,10,10,1,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,2,12,19,1,5,11,0,0,2,8,11,0,1,16,3,27,2,39,30,8,31,1,2,0,1,8,17,2,12,11,169,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808963072155944,0.19150971943409287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12213286429912115,0.0,0.0,0.05581597646965765,0.08179084981138053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081324310233126,0.0,0.0,0.13330222883772744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993621378715555,0.0,0.07059933328652031,0.0,0.0886683429704621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200296966341337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953129581410002,0.06373431568510975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148715320564313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168160642207564,0.06668411857515275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052724113484694524,0.07220690410128766,0.06725658424705004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729592318577783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041705626833237634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06384389420022052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430162725822548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701095083825546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079214677154884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506858919029923,0.09004685202658592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11276648706904707,0.038998798572611744,0.0,0.07048754419588911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265989857544011,0.053284266005095685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6206784007932347,0.0,0.08044551740875061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736212977987642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782122247733725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409195149334658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863697880673516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546107626484276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527648037468036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085910800249927,0.05113837921865365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21801092251586068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206526655288764,0.0,0.0798833362703873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374889684414252,0.2002135463544428,0.09144005488604004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106065279004124,0.20459630833025128,0.0,0.06337267895259846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868927555139762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602047292031124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04708325847196986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07399921169385068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313510507821336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HeavyRainGuy,2020/03/08,"I might finally be on the path to getting help I told someone, granted, in a kind of unhinged way (picture the cat lady from the Simpsons, *but* they are now going to help me get help.

**Yahoooo!**

It only took me 5+ years but I am finally going to be free of this worsening waking nightmare! I am going to get better! I am going to feel healthy again! I think I made them think I am crazy! I am going to finally be whole again!",-0.892256493506494,1.2074875340909124,2.0137012987012994,91.82090909090911,99.79545454545456,4.3324675324675335,21.058441558441558,6.1826913282559595,0.4818805194805198,325,13,67,4,14,113,53,88,0.075,0.715,0.21100000000000002,0.8994,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,10,1,1,1,0,7,24,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,3,1,13,4,11,17,1,16,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,7,46,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560361751179401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324288137271224,0.0,0.0,0.5410388975312229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580402613522604,0.0,0.467820772634273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3310480601606833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143888454875975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15577877067876794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746485260520776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521004788538498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949215186617106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21097906478481465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573129227106072,0.18291219978488665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067721160123186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838057387924179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601760464073934
mentalhealth,anothgoodolthrowaway,2020/03/08,"quite the crippling social anxiety   

Wondering if anyone has any advice on dealing with really bad social anxiety? On a logical level I know that this isn’t me, I’m not this timid person that gets overwhelmingly anxious talking to the cashier at the supermarket. I just don’t know how to translate this into real life and not be consumed with thoughts that I don’t know what to say while talking to people, the things I’m saying are stupid and they must think I’m weird etc. For the last two years this has been gradually wearing me down and really affecting my life. I feel like the most boring person in the world sometimes with nothing interesting to say to my friends or even my family. When I believe I am like this I start acting like it. It makes sense that if my mind is constantly thinking of me in this negative way, replaying past painful interactions and reinforcing this belief that I am just socially incapable, it will have an affect on my behaviour. I know this I can see the pattern, but I don’t know how to break it. I’ve been doing meditating and its helped a bit but not enough, im so sick of how this is holding me back, its ruining my life and ruining experiences that would be great because of this artificially constructed perception of who I am hijacks my brain and colours every social interaction I have. I don’t even get outgoing and confident when im drunk anymore, I just feel drunk and awkward and anxious, that’s gotta be how you know its bad. I live in a easy country and have enough food and water and shelter and I hate that im so weak and that so many people around the world would give anything to trade places with me and I cant even be happy even with all this privilege. I cant afford to see a psychologist or whatever. Hope everyone is having a nice day.",6.627820512820513,6.585521603988607,7.256779202279202,74.29354487179488,65.15384615384616,10.894643874643876,34.074216524216524,10.577609850970193,3.5428927635327634,1437,58,272,34,20,476,180,351,0.166,0.736,0.098,-0.9654,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,1,1,18,23,2,3,15,0,32,12,2,7,2,66,57,32,0,6,12,0,2,3,1,5,6,3,0,2,30,23,4,1,15,2,1,1,11,13,0,1,3,8,33,10,29,45,6,27,1,3,3,0,20,14,0,7,13,189,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566839751477312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059617415053831564,0.0,0.13413193984128724,0.1980803334007976,0.08694334506140744,0.06129967753539944,0.0,0.07214349845640773,0.07804332765317014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741147143401273,0.14639865069716726,0.05344175040039253,0.0,0.0,0.09877209452573778,0.0,0.0,0.09571102116602187,0.0,0.0,0.09786675863067387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947382315971894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05653876748100069,0.090382114402683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18116947119779733,0.09777327080685266,0.2316162044900191,0.0,0.07386428021585915,0.08377076810307334,0.0,0.08575636896543548,0.08264582213630614,0.0,0.08865540086027437,0.0626302140368059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600879372259492,0.0,0.06773227109508022,0.0,0.09160608263044334,0.08409937209853653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665455314552676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332448040196636,0.0,0.08655424509200511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05876217880652423,0.0,0.0,0.08707435161776779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28409025603499183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890810589544429,0.07146132321481513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857680291024776,0.12849083334062966,0.0,0.07741266932450963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058519236434006014,0.08888184360734983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851993928187482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08412004858139452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328519716449336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368926278367947,0.1215562496912098,0.15309706562667405,0.09159466014198626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932459732672808,0.0,0.09978565948290752,0.11232504935179424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091519291627153,0.0,0.0,0.13972048675098292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3574669549012927,0.0,0.0,0.08670613914910617,0.0,0.06205203730768541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409288341908895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05824288861263071,0.11234854712606704,0.0,0.06959879643887397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563913980461607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958697480651993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507247550458443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455401640421493,0.0,0.0,0.0564554775295892
mentalhealth,kneecapbuster,2020/03/08,"Daydreaming about an ideal ‘me’ for about 30 min.? So. For about two, three, maybe even four years now, I’ve been known to space out and day daydream without realizing more than usual. Often I imagine a ‘better me’(?), if that makes sense. Often I go through make-believe situation with the ‘better me’ as the a character going through it. The ‘better me’ is prettier, skinnier, funnier, more confident, and more attractive in general than me. 

More often than not, ‘I’ go through a realistic(day at school) or not realistic(adventure through a magical forest) story. Normally the stories have characters that are similar to the people I know in real life. These characters go through different stories that aren’t connected, like going through many adventures. Most of the time the stories don’t intertwine, and if they do intertwine it’s like waking up from a dream then going to sleep to continue it. I’ve daydreamed about a range of things like recently I dreamed about ‘better me’ crashing a plane as a pilot, or sometimes a normal day at school, or ‘me’ going to hogwarts even. Most of my day dreams are practically dreams.

The most I remember daydreaming for is about thirty minutes, I only space out when I’m bored or am doing nothing. My mom says that it looks like I’m staring at nothing or spacing out, she says the longest I’ve done it was while listening to music on a long train ride.

I’m not sure if it is connected, but I do have social anxiety, and have been experiencing a sort of pretty bad kinda anxiety/panic attacks for the past two years. I went to see a doctor about the weird attacks I was getting, I had symptoms of trembling, racing heart, crying, confusion, breathing difficulty. I never went back to get properly diagnosed though. 

I’m not sure if I should see someone or do something about the daydreaming. I often daydream during school, but I don’t have any issues because I’m above the rest of my class. I have gotten in trouble a few times for not paying attention, but my teachers are becoming alright with it since they realized I get good grades regardless. I haven’t told anyone that I daydream about ‘better me’ since it feels kinda personal.

If anyone knows exactly what my daydreaming habits, please comment below. Thank you.",7.341941747572818,8.035434825242719,7.53477281553398,70.39469320388349,63.6116504854369,10.669669902912622,36.62563106796117,10.53366545652748,4.132470563106796,1796,83,294,42,25,583,207,412,0.09300000000000001,0.8079999999999999,0.099,-0.623,2,0,3,0,0,0,58.0,0,1,2,6,20,25,2,2,27,1,27,8,4,1,4,61,55,25,0,10,20,1,1,4,0,1,4,4,0,1,16,9,0,0,9,4,1,10,11,8,0,4,10,10,36,17,55,44,9,44,0,0,4,0,12,15,0,22,23,211,52,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05765349905426807,0.0,0.06485668373749623,0.0,0.0,0.1185606889404023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928996202902167,0.0,0.06519080374515315,0.0707879942621967,0.05168127305394537,0.09363316070907453,0.0,0.09551834565765388,0.0,0.3749063495168422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312715888971762,0.21870507297587774,0.0,0.0,0.08605020170045835,0.0,0.08857735021056774,0.0,0.0867762111572063,0.0,0.0867596636532477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199315346414254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04286745798218811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13288259462937005,0.0,0.3372781164797093,0.0711096782356108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046504246614868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848858788290766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318605167068343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05988282048403797,0.16567745362764902,0.0,0.0,0.07502788176106225,0.07119408448768369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318299323639065,0.0859538992378471,0.08517318859395406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929364171442216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538778007883354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16613335176055766,0.1626979343855574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447922486779749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093237233440162,0.058775972761352824,0.07402687218448424,0.0,0.09306329068314127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862520259371225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649852177308693,0.0,0.0,0.08371030058473221,0.0,0.09603953266856452,0.0,0.0,0.1348413662830217,0.0,0.2574065150051325,0.13511781655554955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14026225086396188,0.0952965892126877,0.0848415093859688,0.08642282094805967,0.07183405788411694,0.06526800313514544,0.08384986680349124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15980882505427632,0.08811917487153302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805429314929893,0.0,0.0,0.05632425224263956,0.0,0.0832961966907671,0.0,0.09887212853183497,0.0,0.0,0.08101119270677687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656360330710596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933735030432778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15718434173124166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172516653386612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091914440577959
mentalhealth,SquareAnon,2020/03/08,"Been struggling for a month and a half and I’m not sure what to do Hello I have not been feeling so great since about late January i began feeling hopelessness, very tired I can’t concentrate at all. I feel bitterness hate and anger. My concentration has been bad since last year when my grandpa died but since then it has gotten worse. I broke down in front of my mum. That was last month I’m getting worse, I’ve had a feeling to cut myself but the worse one is the feeling of snapping and breaking my fingers this is more prominent than the cutting thoughts. I pinch myself until I bleed sometimes. Last week I was home alone and heard a voice say hello to me clear as hell. I haven’t been alone since so I don’t know much about the voice. My friends and family are worried about me but when I try to talk to people nothing comes out. I also get these massive highs every other when I’m jumpy but then it goes down after an hour or so and then I get really lows and they go away after a few hours. I really don’t know what to do at the moment I’d appreciate any advice or help people can give me",2.330575221238938,4.189660243362834,3.384256637168143,90.92567699115044,77.09734513274336,6.289911504424777,21.919469026548683,7.1686216300943375,0.5711299115044253,869,24,185,10,20,279,129,226,0.255,0.6609999999999999,0.084,-0.9876,0,2,0,0,0,2,12.0,0,0,1,0,10,14,6,1,11,0,20,3,1,0,3,29,41,26,1,0,8,2,6,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,8,10,0,0,8,0,0,3,6,11,0,2,11,11,25,3,24,30,4,34,1,3,0,0,11,9,1,2,21,120,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144510735028806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23623595615058024,0.0,0.0912030982695555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755566128659287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715062118182757,0.0,0.09522422396234044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982411266456738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183624604911228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608925667821258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751307118176397,0.0,0.28832717059847834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881121912192689,0.0,0.17875406816606929,0.10940397887093646,0.06481536318614296,0.0,0.0,0.1257368803862571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125974970436238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644309354684277,0.12049659153878725,0.11439813072573235,0.0,0.2246260370338065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535415852563844,0.2788898264040254,0.12864963593251694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182061962733612,0.0,0.08383744089126023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943087668761782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728098995002976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15813123262401646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14612246226478592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069450685919167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773624081015856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127950944073025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922636451455215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748765738269878,0.0,0.0,0.09166641089817416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09054033419083847,0.0,0.13107989533696338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743021754557078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410046471312578,0.0,0.0,0.0914813770127129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581995153316478,0.3486699668338445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344233038457236
mentalhealth,throwawayxd1567,2020/03/08,"Messed up a lot of friendships, need help Hi,

I was suicidal and Baker Acted to a facility last Sunday. I was severely depressed, hypomanic and came close to attempting suicide. I had the cops called before that happened.

Once I got out of the facility within 24 hrs, a lot of people have either cut me off or kept their distance. Before I was committed, I did something that angered and hurt a lot of my friends and it was horrible of me but I apologized and expressed regret, the person I affected directly accepted my apology. A lot of them expressed concern after what I did anyway and called the police as well. I scared a lot of them from the way I was talking.

Many have expressed a desire for me to get better and to do better. I still have several friends, but a lot of them are really distant. I have one friend that I'm still talking to on a regular basis, however. I've expressed a desire to get better and have a plan to do so, but a lot of people seem unconvinced.

I'm feeling better now but at the same time, a lot of people who are still my friends are very distant. One of my friends says that some blame themselves or want to give me time to heal.

It was a really traumatic experience and I want to move on. I want the friends I still have to move on as well. However, when I talk to them, it's not the same. A lot don't want to play video games with me or seem to be avoiding me altogether.

What do I do? I feel like I've fucked everything up. I need the people I still have and I know a lot of them need space, if I want to get better I need a support system and I know that a lot of them want to see me get better.

I need advice. Please help. I'm really isolated.

 tl;dr did something that hurt a lot of friends, got Baker Acted for being suicidal, got out and a lot of friends either cut me off or are really distant. Trying to salvage the ones that are still my friends but distant. Just trying to move on.",2.7540051020408183,4.3283365433673495,4.569642857142857,84.11910714285716,75.14795918367345,7.757142857142857,26.535714285714285,8.472884824447931,1.8555979591836744,1503,56,306,28,32,511,150,392,0.152,0.614,0.233,0.9863,2,2,2,0,0,1,42.0,0,0,7,8,13,32,4,2,30,0,29,2,0,1,1,72,63,26,3,15,14,0,2,1,9,0,1,1,0,1,13,17,0,2,7,3,0,6,2,11,2,3,15,4,46,21,52,46,18,35,0,4,1,1,35,14,1,21,14,227,59,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05195205583504027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047870783157702,0.0,0.0,0.28211982645774714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085744696939866,0.0608064013881871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04579078952856051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04778112044058789,0.052005404535953134,0.0,0.0,0.05376347018486715,0.03798096463797593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696751367670905,0.04915002795360899,0.11110571593977618,0.05100054864690985,0.0,0.0,0.12756231194885792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047013482924918935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127052875755549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382809858338053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584359995491684,0.04333643165277745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025973650111571617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5875848762524524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05390079230808622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951739929152854,0.0,0.1971052361933511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05661880803734792,0.10807759264617246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14743119409854302,0.04642147823674544,0.0,0.05835901741628416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362350039194269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04227880609841765,0.05322726875721622,0.0,0.042365485637421485,0.09679852763301333,0.0,0.1201222485676477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185776590812195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547450078820532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744610825907557,0.060330818199486935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819562770605678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062001678950083725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219085845739301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04386655200136886,0.18814796246402465,0.04219976683836582,0.0,0.0,0.0956031326674644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dmssljteb9,2020/03/08,"Too sick to be in a relationship? I’ve been dating my boyfriend for 6 months now, things were pretty good. But things have been going downhill lately, I’ve been diagnosed with severe anxiety, depression as well as PTSD and it has been really taking over my life as of late. I’ve had to give up a lot in the past few months, my boyfriend has been very understanding but I have a hard time being around anyone even him, I often can’t bring myself to hang out with him anymore and I’m always canceling our plans. I feel that I am just in no place mentally or emotionally to be in a relationship but I don’t know if I should break up with him or not and how to go about doing it if that’s what I need to do. If anyone has any advise please that would be great. Thank you for reading this.",3.2877777777777797,4.438088333333333,4.461419753086421,87.12138888888893,73.07407407407408,7.8691358024691365,22.141975308641968,8.344100000000001,0.972508641975308,618,14,135,10,12,203,103,162,0.075,0.816,0.109,0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,1,0,1,9,5,0,0,5,0,23,3,0,1,0,27,34,15,0,6,10,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,9,8,0,0,3,1,0,4,4,1,1,0,7,2,16,4,25,21,2,23,0,1,0,0,9,10,0,7,8,100,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12492333402465647,0.0,0.0,0.1020961204215628,0.0,0.11485193269490605,0.0,0.14889237011077774,0.20995406304704867,0.0,0.0,0.1336508966546588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12931000689279767,0.1523826289682826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688802978822928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916194741019103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075912151458425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14402200453335784,0.17064897688297415,0.12592509373017916,0.0,0.16552302524904305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13449037985930265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250960053634207,0.0,0.33871489210361644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604393057854768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763837306512327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15129954093941944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23967070569805365,0.0,0.0,0.11132229740162763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14331968340860182,0.0,0.0,0.15685784838850267,0.1648018088801413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274003089372434,0.0,0.0,0.17549835757435894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15017441085548994,0.0,0.09617954547864732,0.0,0.0,0.3223749928574696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16960844036738734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128819200765862,0.0,0.0,0.13822301583620605,0.0,0.0,0.1994844279687583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754421593233001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562945623573603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387609386211415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498830082949545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665073155479557,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mapleleafyt,2020/03/08,"I hallucinate but dont care? Hello! So, to make this short: Sometimes I hallucinate (Auditory Hallucinations and Visual Hallucinations) and I just dont care? I am scared in the moment of it happening but a few second later I just brush it off and go on with my day- my last therapist even accused me of lying to her because ""all my patients usually care and are worried"" but im just not. I have had this ever since my dad committed suicide when I just turned 6 and its been a normal thing for me ever since. I mean- sometimes when its really bad I do get anxious and just run away but most of the time when I hear my name being called, or somebody greets me- Or even when I see someone fall off our roof and hear it I just don't mind it. There are two voices- a teenage girl who I sometimes hear call my name/greet me and a static radio sounding voice who told me to kill myself (I am scared of the radio voice but I dont hear him very often- almost never.) As a child the hallucinations were way more frequently but now I barely have any- maybe 3 times a month if ever. The earliest Hallucination I remeber was asking my mom what the man was doing (I told her he hung from my ceilling) and I did that like everyday for a few weeks. Do I just not care because I grew up with it or is it something else?",1.3035692908262817,3.6375982716981135,3.29152895250488,87.73962264150944,83.26415094339623,6.070266753415745,21.21340273259597,7.372421405659032,0.759013012361744,1022,32,213,16,29,344,148,265,0.165,0.784,0.051,-0.9885,0,0,1,0,0,2,28.0,1,0,0,0,20,9,1,2,13,0,21,0,0,1,6,44,39,25,2,2,19,2,0,1,0,0,0,8,0,3,15,11,0,0,1,2,0,4,7,4,0,2,8,10,39,5,19,30,5,32,0,0,1,0,23,7,0,7,21,156,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09356795262542378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354328025453518,0.0,0.0,0.1055620587275841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735499087559435,0.0,0.08779116621859596,0.0,0.07801957265117977,0.11392188406420388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908280053498728,0.0,0.381078483662491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06026190072225096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285374817759981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805820621630219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343417925879295,0.2535689845353629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048819216468462615,0.0,0.053104837473013054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262982261298092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42126049189619097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093262592546187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033789409801222,0.0,0.0,0.07616712137382547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045650693541644166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062372785496483285,0.0,0.0938743334190978,0.10178495616654318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434906402472587,0.10943730747398314,0.07458394480657056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206768197816159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155262302995366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05986088195974908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18710206102390448,0.0,0.07446060885817606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15459119848721206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917250031354392,0.07193566883020608,0.2772474701275872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022096032207383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849253765554707,0.062078239900275785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089727332377012,0.0,0.0,0.17857431054012654,0.0,0.0,0.10163728928457956,0.09127856107897957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291237773169393,0.07709884877716623,0.0,0.07416934528616048,0.07495296514987634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489416397524587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shloompaa,2020/03/08,"Kinda rant but not really just sharing my story I was 12 when my mental health deteriorated at an increasing rate. Day before my birthday I was walking to school when a man grabbed me by the wrist and tried to drag me away, went to the police but because I was in the country because of my dads work I had to get diplomatic immunity or something like that. The police ignored that and interviewed me straight away, messed me up having to recount it so many times. They eventually get a suspect in custody and I had to participate in an identity parade to identify him. Unfortunately I couldn’t pick him out, so the suspect got out. This made me feel really guilty it made me think what could happen if he tried again with another girl and she wasn’t as lucky.

I started self harming but my friend encouraged me to tell my parents, they did not take it well. When I was 14 I had a pretty severe suicide attempt and was put on the liver transplant list thing, getting ready to be flown to a children’s hospital if my bloods were still bad. Spent a week and a bit in hospital thankfully no transplant and began to move on. At this point I started taking psychiatric medicines that had so many side effects it was so hard. 

Anyway fast forward like 2 years still self harming and chronically suicidal I went through I think about 4 hospitalisations. 

Beginning of 2019 I was raped by someone I thought was my best friend which not surprisingly really messed me up not enough evidence to prosecute the guy grrrrr and again tried to move on. Later that year my mother left to go to the Middle East for 9 months for work and I was hospitalised yet another 2 times for a total of 4 weeks. 

And now I’m here, turning 18 still really struggling and I do slip up every now and then but I’m finally beginning to truly heal and grow as a person. 

Thanks for listening!!",4.9970527225583385,6.482651617977531,5.7926966292134825,77.91933016421784,69.33707865168539,9.072428694900607,30.827139152981854,9.466822959209583,2.8684549697493527,1480,61,273,32,26,484,196,356,0.2,0.682,0.11699999999999999,-0.988,1,0,1,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,2,5,20,20,1,1,18,0,21,8,3,4,1,45,49,31,2,4,12,3,3,2,2,0,4,1,0,7,13,17,0,1,7,0,1,10,7,8,1,0,24,4,38,12,46,22,5,60,0,0,0,1,23,23,0,5,31,185,51,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20721983547090395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18566873431531114,0.0,0.08250144023543925,0.12046617522057693,0.0,0.08407923486724375,0.0,0.10369401544267992,0.0,0.10787390532629006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788909965315377,0.0,0.0,0.06372367127847348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10209617526755266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325089706418115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04996083106498442,0.0,0.0,0.1082404986203972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526792737269253,0.0,0.1548709714607595,0.0,0.05615546748225171,0.0,0.07902663395327213,0.0,0.0,0.09783650697565008,0.08737652797008376,0.0,0.08851351224969763,0.0,0.0,0.10502941330601707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735633591485973,0.0,0.0,0.09654623415513816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869910487731905,0.0,0.20035376210005787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957629522888588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07886845128585222,0.21003679312261375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971577104799478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862762624509938,0.0,0.0,0.09340650231954492,0.0,0.0,0.10052433943360392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993303994261887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25319846328936496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000004678406148,0.0,0.0,0.20615880404935272,0.11162611615653363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372059831847037,0.0760680439679626,0.0,0.0,0.1398751265274144,0.0,0.2367271357239462,0.0,0.0,0.10329668625470896,0.0,0.21616215483016205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485842366706229,0.0,0.08636347613024872,0.18194021934070567,0.0,0.0,0.06564435083427002,0.1266257154983328,0.0,0.07844335883583888,0.11523271831669946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012546030654769,0.1074758866610761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585173403199351,0.0,0.08884121400755307,0.18319398240405046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14386834915279045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272595938060981
mentalhealth,shrekiskindacute,2020/03/08,"My friend did something really weird to me One of my best friends is struggling with depression and an eating disorder for a long time.  She is doing a lot better in the last two years and has reduced her therapy appointments, but sometimes I feel like she still hast a really unhealthy obsession with her body  and with what others think about her. 

We have been friends for about 2 years and met through mutal friends in a volleybal team. When I met her we were 16 and she had just transfered school. As we grew closer she told me that she transfered because she got bullied in her old school which led to her being depressed and insecure about her body. She also told me that she is really happy because she met amazing friends in her new school and in the volleyball team and directly felt accepted and welcome.
I'm one of the only friends that knows about her mental health and usually she seems really confident and happy around others.

But one time she asked me if she could measure my thigh. Yeah right. I was like "",Bro wtf ?"" and directly said no.
 She always talks about how perfect my body, especially how skinny my legs are and at this time I suspected her to still have a really toxic realtionship to her body and food in general. And this behaviour only confirmed my assumptions. Not only was the question really messed up but it also showed how bad her state of mind still was.
This happened about 6 months ago and I had almost forgotten about it until yesterday.

We were getting ready for a party at her house and she wanted me to close her eyes. And as you can probably guess, she measured my thigh. That sounds absolutly weird just to write down and was completly disturbing.
 I was so weireded out that I didn't knew what to say at first.  
I then told her that what she did was in no way okay , that she could have just asked because how she did it felt really weird to me and that it doesn't matter what size our legs are compared, in general that it makes no sense to compare our bodies because I'm a feet taller than her and have a different body type.

 She looked ashamed and got really silent after I said that but I feel like she didn't understood how disrespected,  disturbed and at the same time how worried I was in that moment. 


Should I talk to her about this again and what can I say to show her that I'm on one side worried about her mental health but that I also felt really disrespected in that moment ? Or should I talk about that with my or her parents ?",5.740451477932247,6.5747191066945625,5.72898771764071,81.45213726548792,67.13807531380753,9.431340261843703,29.22688621946281,9.536714749202195,2.4731370495343503,1975,66,380,39,31,620,207,478,0.141,0.706,0.153,0.8958,3,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,6,1,0,6,29,31,0,6,14,2,36,17,13,8,1,83,67,47,0,6,12,2,5,3,6,2,2,5,0,0,32,35,3,0,13,5,0,2,7,13,0,6,32,12,76,18,56,30,3,53,0,2,2,0,75,24,0,8,28,278,108,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056724992926903986,0.0,0.06407868335539449,0.0,0.0,0.1535229916476808,0.05324641958797752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056966392845221314,0.11964764949467617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053430596172729945,0.15603556840500052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715559205797611,0.05659566985167218,0.0,0.4264837100955389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670943306102237,0.0,0.0,0.10218471254105828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11023232669373363,0.0,0.0,0.06685795633114544,0.07334030616808296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547972926680125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647124942660209,0.09143170810595372,0.18432689033050886,0.0,0.0,0.05443151067689971,0.07737930672416772,0.0,0.29664008028837324,0.0,0.033433146990661834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236039888752498,0.0,0.0704943353931671,0.0,0.05658786037700415,0.136241218116194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13604087765250805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383810595678429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03516829617537553,0.05216197122687825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378968720582026,0.0,0.0,0.056630852362085926,0.05373711203144069,0.0,0.0,0.05440365821817531,0.0,0.0,0.04271511623026702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12897764702211106,0.0,0.06461361640262638,0.0,0.051077755241572584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061803813506294665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714877544407376,0.0,0.17345037613462125,0.14600625973443238,0.0,0.0,0.07105547539431868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899413354688365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168561699408375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689538729404716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05464876631399722,0.1217419761114846,0.10177791678291467,0.0,0.1942897760957437,0.0,0.058255857954029475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049264121054165465,0.06328966400319512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331213559299706,0.0,0.0,0.06689826884847172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15430288994240166,0.0,0.0,0.07318035927161086,0.0,0.0,0.0410034506704778,0.0,0.0,0.14925685710928316,0.0,0.0,0.1834411202677017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251082607237368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047808016511142,0.0,0.037744103633473435,0.05079382264881819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997384072273585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824174213971899
mentalhealth,LuKarxx,2020/03/08,"A friend is thinking of harming themselves Hey, first post here, I don't really know how to put this but I am desperate to help this person so I'll try to keep this short and I'll answer questions if anyone needs details that I can provide. Some weeks ago I met this person online through videoganes and became friends with them. We don't know each other irl but I really care for him because he told me he's dealing with depression. He really appreciates having someone to talk to but recently he has kind of closed off and he's been hinting at harming himself whenever we talk or text. I really don't know what to do and I'm afraid something I say might be taken the wrong way, and I'm really unsure of how to help him, but I still want to help him. Anyone has any advice?",3.1184615384615384,4.856733751592358,4.377324840764331,85.18966193042628,74.54140127388536,7.378539931406173,25.452719255267034,8.139509932561175,1.5705672709456144,617,21,122,10,13,203,97,157,0.127,0.713,0.16,0.6897,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,1,1,5,9,0,1,2,0,13,0,0,2,0,30,26,14,0,3,6,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,7,11,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,4,1,16,4,17,20,2,12,0,1,0,0,27,4,0,5,5,74,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099994316576614,0.12790567180855034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09812313966571576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017838852905034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795873376568042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711475834356622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14875815777670473,0.12427802167335708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273424078967315,0.0,0.0,0.22295844563329625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29014656906315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825287800328886,0.0,0.15025734973856147,0.23789643593979326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530704351547948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699028808092932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519794717589305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381913312883029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14505276924363508,0.16163945604107732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4621840151720973,0.0,0.14247040770245584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474635914162595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225768444485265,0.1110826141064571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523134505393245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23195201717070105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924561402984112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378766719600311,0.0,0.09796442870230827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510684061736135,0.11453184345026315,0.11574190438863804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776005848973387,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wondervj,2020/03/08,"My Generalized Anxiety Disorder is taking over my life and my relationship. Please help. I have really bad anxiety being around gay people that I’m not close with. I’m a lot better at communicating with straight crowds.

To keep this short: I am currently in a committed relationship and my partner has a lot of close gay friends. Whenever we would hangout with his friends, I always shy away from talking or being myself because I get super anxious around them. I have this irrational fear of getting hurt by gay people due to past experiences. Is that the main cause of this issue? 

My partner and I get along great when we are alone. He is aware that I have anxiety around gay people. He did address that sometimes he feels like he can’t be himself around his friends because he is constantly worried about what I’m thinking due to my quietness. Of course, I want him to be himself and to have fun with his friends so I’m scared that if he keeps feeling this way, he will eventually feel a certain level of resentment toward me. I’ve talked to him about this and I told him the reasons behind my quietness and that has nothing to do with the way he behaves, I always welcome for him to be himself. 

What should I do to solve this issue?",4.768396624472572,6.439035227848103,5.328122362869202,80.31387130801689,70.13924050632912,8.135864978902953,31.732067510548525,8.680891452615391,2.6250320675105487,987,44,181,17,18,317,125,237,0.134,0.687,0.18,0.9078,1,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,2,0,1,2,8,16,1,2,7,0,24,5,0,2,2,39,40,10,0,4,3,0,3,1,6,3,1,2,1,2,14,20,0,2,5,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,5,33,11,35,30,3,22,0,1,0,4,35,14,0,4,7,127,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184662022046504,0.0,0.0,0.1797151496062108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24783959411562284,0.1219996507181154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845413040698306,0.0,0.0,0.1014615643528179,0.0,0.09016838746186127,0.13166122594150154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550970143308476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093701292324123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670044134187114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12376760913834588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563640398835104,0.0,0.12152045522312192,0.16381123385949067,0.07714914555833799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337358444050849,0.0,0.1692632967547888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906100440784398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238442269102653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156071288597222,0.0,0.0,0.2254301272790825,0.0,0.19197560521303644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627758655958085,0.05275918956348469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18362101436041184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036207519355852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309010140654734,0.22460311556914872,0.0,0.0,0.11854223219988302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691821169347789,0.11103324274990016,0.0,0.2318849017399998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811832569721927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068063498247794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119616448275388,0.17359894596512712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919658944805024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319050128297123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06369618167503581,0.1714372441760347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967060513705572,0.0,0.07671405957352577,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PimplePineapple,2020/03/08,"I feel like my life is falling apart and i dont know why For the past 8 or 9 months iv been having panic attacks that I never had before, after the first month I noticed it was only in social situations or when I was under a lot of stress. A few months had passed and I was suddenly hit with a load of stress for my exams that are coming up, I had a full on breakdown of crying to my mum at 3am about the stress from it all, after that she tried taking me to my gp who just told me to do breathing exercises (which dont help me at all). Everything up to this part in my story I could handle but then the main problems began.

Two months ago I began to feel really down about most things in my life, I felt like I was failing school even though im passing with ease, I felt like my social life and family life was a joke. I had began debating suicide, I dont know why, but I just did, I felt like there was nothing left, the only reasons I could find to live where that I didn't want my mum to be upset, eventually I had a breakdown one morning and told her everything, she tried the gp again but it still didn't help, she then found a private psychiatric analytic (something like that) but I was 2 months two young (just turned 16) so I had to wait.

A month later I noticed my sleeping pattern was all over the place, most night I could hardly sleep and would just get 3 hours if I was lucky and then some nights I would just wake up at 2am and be unable to sleep. Not long after I began itching all over when I was in stress. I began to become more irritated with people around me and got in arguments with my parents a lot more. I finally reached 16 only to find the psychiatric analytic (something like that) was on maternity leave, everywhere else was far away, I said screw it and said id sort things out my self ( as you can tell, that did not work out).

Since then iv began having more arguments with friends and family, been losing interest in basically anything I do, im only at school 2 times a week out of 5, im getting basically no sleep and if I do I wake an hour or two later. besides that iv been between one sad thing to another.

I dont know what been happening to me, if there is actually anything happening, if so what should i do. I am open to any ideas, so far my judgement is anxiety but i dont want to leave it with only one idea.

Sorry for the book and a half i just wrote but i had a lot to say, either way if you have any help or ideas then thanks.",5.30293589389334,4.444360276595745,6.401013401492126,82.05738636363638,68.0909090909091,9.552058579718155,28.909159988947223,8.841846274778883,1.9331183199778947,1921,54,424,28,28,648,221,517,0.142,0.778,0.081,-0.975,1,0,2,0,0,1,47.0,0,2,0,4,21,23,2,6,22,0,53,17,8,1,5,87,86,39,1,14,24,3,6,6,1,3,9,3,0,1,21,24,0,1,15,3,0,4,11,12,0,8,43,9,62,11,61,34,18,77,0,3,0,1,24,32,1,17,46,299,83,6,0.0,0.0,0.05641850957067845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0512489727351685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863154210931925,0.06062343395574659,0.04422785383394867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951526417518508,0.0514670688017129,0.0,0.06577222052665242,0.0543185271179881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385145689244341,0.04919579180671398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04980198194791015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13848026972121347,0.0,0.06350639801467517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3387902010681836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0482965083364344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03818586255398862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391970043879513,0.0,0.10900453227638908,0.0,0.05846539035337809,0.04130261525012458,0.166532656761712,0.06333284363959547,0.10568261903823084,0.0491768947456565,0.0,0.06339049987282054,0.04466725806514432,0.0,0.060411270241433786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04623945302653082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225015690489893,0.0,0.05179034190299952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11625531062748408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387106625655598,0.0,0.0,0.19579624386255814,0.1873484023929269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531983833774917,0.0,0.0,0.1224341928647166,0.06281550919365811,0.0,0.16334406749825375,0.16947115810644164,0.0,0.051051169882899636,0.051163920150924885,0.0,0.06467951951496073,0.0,0.14745519317963535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768813904434101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04459002547151627,0.0,0.0,0.10850978627019199,0.0,0.05547447114482698,0.1316441435114381,0.0,0.0,0.11752959064555353,0.21985226259190696,0.0,0.06783273557783541,0.06419604363565719,0.06260735567730953,0.05519038174274082,0.04008122189470455,0.0,0.06040373747704528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05532056789021122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03703738177872125,0.059442826904739135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10998945777750556,0.04597632730400879,0.0,0.11702250835222468,0.0,0.0,0.06031302270499345,0.0,0.0,0.04782466487756496,0.0649858021669998,0.2314245909557553,0.117868989672023,0.0,0.08901669146015934,0.0,0.06471848172765253,0.0,0.0,0.046170650428584065,0.0,0.264904775976641,0.0,0.0,0.06323956433658215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043469229855321034,0.0,0.05053232939281989,0.053227727191415684,0.0,0.0,0.11522794499838332,0.0,0.05680234942436956,0.0,0.03371203858230293,0.0,0.0,0.11048826376787846,0.0,0.0785043581663176,0.06288545980192049,0.1694287890964109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820085603246738,0.045890375612715736,0.04637522025769356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433699784052004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04208956803467361,0.0,0.0,0.08213937468547979,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wazakin,2020/03/08,"anxiety attack after seeing toxic ex hi, made a brand new account to post this. i would just like to hear other people's thoughts or advice on dealing with this. sorry if it's pretty long.

i dated this guy for seven months, i was the side chick for two of those months. he was very sweet and affectionate during the earlier parts of the ~relationship~ which eventually deteriorated when i opened up about being sexually promiscuous in the past. i told him everything since i trusted him and he assured me he would listen and understand, since he already knew i had bipolar disorder before we dated. i opened up about how i regretted acting the way i did in the past, which was borne out of my need for validation and ended up with me getting hurt. i opened up about how i was once sexually assaulted by someone i dated. 

since i told him all those things, i asked him to not bring them up anymore because remembering the person i was before and everything that happened really hurt me, and i wanted to move on from that.

but no, he kept bringing them up and teasing me about my horrible taste in men, he asked for screenshots of my conversations with them, asked for the nudes i used to send them. and every time he did this my self esteem just kept deteriorating. 

one time i lashed out and told him something along the lines of ""you don't ask me out to anything unless there's a guarantee of sex,"" and he got very angry. he said he was offended. i immediately apologized and said i might have just said that out of insecurity, since i felt that sex was all i was good for. he did not believe me. i felt like damaged goods, that no one will ever love me because of my trauma and insecurities, and tried to kill myself that night.

he kept accusing me of cheating, of having sex with other people--all while only seeing him at most thrice a month and when we went out he wouldn't even look at me, wouldn't walk beside me, wouldn't hold my hand or show intimacy in any way.

he broke things off after seven months which in retrospect was the kindest thing he ever did. 

it has been almost eight months since the breakup and i am still very angry with him and deeply regret even reciprocating his affections when i knew he was in a relationship. now every time i see him or hear his name i get very fearful and cry. i get a tight feeling in my chest and stomach and have difficulty breathing. i try to avoid him as much as possible but there are times when it's unavoidable because we are in a volunteer organization together.

sorry if it got a little long. thank you for reading this.",6.84413480885312,6.749721466800808,7.33491448692153,74.08957494969822,64.71428571428572,10.238832997987927,31.23088531187123,9.871247098662263,2.8134237424547286,2047,67,387,39,28,674,234,497,0.179,0.7509999999999999,0.07,-0.9957,0,2,1,0,0,1,46.0,3,2,4,0,21,27,6,4,18,0,32,11,5,5,5,86,74,36,1,11,13,1,5,2,0,7,1,6,0,5,25,36,1,6,8,2,1,7,8,17,0,6,34,17,68,10,66,32,5,70,0,6,4,5,65,29,0,8,33,268,93,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945655735450235,0.0,0.0,0.07117430715522556,0.0,0.07843629346597451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04833544840499157,0.0,0.05437444286879807,0.0,0.07049023453261834,0.0,0.0,0.058491102712967626,0.0,0.2657931814330246,0.08086143769959082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998538934394446,0.0,0.12096421323189625,0.08008051799110863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807579864979876,0.0,0.07327825306582393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08146149709591335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295397320871285,0.0,0.0,0.09389264103264557,0.12858816353221314,0.11977248936813947,0.0,0.12776056997173518,0.0,0.0,0.07998246293331215,0.035939150919545214,0.0,0.13649197124924756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140589733475743,0.0,0.0,0.11923363680728648,0.1136950712695751,0.0,0.0,0.07037835269524499,0.06285400299803204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16022004757660002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521808469507776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863722879730828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945019940725325,0.07123878617301127,0.0,0.12580351122779468,0.059687582782372225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641506316301664,0.06725568189330748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540248045425423,0.0,0.0,0.2836687374021293,0.07554462011322895,0.05225047703005748,0.05270340479308816,0.0,0.06864753418019436,0.0,0.0667018480752639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569570490677709,0.09632852690438162,0.05405798950481134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697050137733208,0.13570390597041965,0.04927650611778858,0.062062530804731016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012971731906249,0.06807303543546002,0.07231183567168324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109719211350646,0.0,0.04553435957118747,0.0,0.0,0.15262225214809222,0.08051746992444246,0.0,0.20283424255267904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699197886819081,0.0,0.07414981110387725,0.0,0.0,0.2939821043394727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060224122655776084,0.054719284168097765,0.0,0.15913190816211098,0.0,0.0,0.05676294860179864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06543903355726552,0.0,0.0,0.14166310976171145,0.0,0.0,0.0564279586976909,0.16578451423542567,0.0,0.0,0.20375410284913295,0.0,0.09651453480181207,0.0,0.06943283635723223,0.07399466036134897,0.0,0.06138853398960694,0.0,0.23458703499254696,0.04192362084607887,0.11283674836900938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588997861752978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098348323395616,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AshelyA2018,2020/03/08,"Unsure about my response to counselling So, I've been having a lot of issues in school lately with sleep and stuff, and I've been having panic attacks (I think?) and so my school linked me up with a counselor. It's actually been one of my favorite parts of the week, even though I have a pretty good life and I don't know if I'm overthinking it, but are you supposed to enjoy it, or am I approaching this the wrong way? Again, I might just be overthinking it, but at the same time I kinda want to put it to rest, so IDK.",5.18888888888889,4.5504564074074105,5.852222222222222,85.165,68.25925925925927,8.681481481481484,27.25925925925927,7.793537801064563,1.3574703703703703,404,10,89,4,6,132,72,108,0.125,0.772,0.10300000000000001,-0.5304,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,8,5,1,1,6,0,11,2,1,0,0,19,15,12,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,3,0,11,2,13,10,4,10,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,5,4,68,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.19758501504670584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303429367649919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373189552002115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698252395993435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21132982192987526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127418900600153,0.0,0.2283990267683107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301308329494614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721358042766343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21479248058541145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372013435120575,0.0,0.0,0.23755913053703626,0.0,0.21925916525743688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20598842990355715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20354187985495972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4098281618838505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026198123369745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317838172596303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973689987858186,0.1989292725225627,0.0,0.11806397760640727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942416830855712,0.16071411004890868,0.16241209954211294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213730840056876,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway6890765337,2020/03/08,"Homicidal thoughts and ideation Trigger warning: homicidal ideation 

I don’t know why it even crosses mind. I should want to or even think about hurting or killing others. I know it’s bad and by no means should I ever. But I think about how it would feel and how I would do it, yet there’s not person I want to harm in any way. Sometimes I look at a person and I picture different ways I could kill them. I sound crazy, like a murderer. But I’m not, I don’t think I could live with the guilt. I can’t talk to anybody about this like at all. I can’t even tell my therapist about this, I’d be deemed dangerous to people around me. I can’t stop thinking about it. The blood, the adrenaline rush, the feeling of power. But it’s so wrong, I know how bad it is and how bad it is that I even think about this stuff. Please don’t be upset with me, I know it’s wrong I think this way. I just needed to get this out of my head.",-0.2849319727891171,1.8757240102040849,1.261326530612248,100.56522108843541,89.51020408163265,4.6952380952380945,18.37074829931973,6.21433560688645,-0.3645843537414968,710,20,172,7,24,227,96,196,0.27,0.674,0.055999999999999994,-0.9932,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,1,20,15,4,2,6,0,17,2,2,5,2,49,37,15,3,9,8,0,2,2,0,4,0,1,0,2,17,9,0,1,14,0,0,2,9,13,0,0,1,4,26,2,21,28,1,13,0,1,1,0,5,5,0,2,5,114,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702041996615237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082506707101653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837011353727552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18085716825317652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118332188412107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992276220745164,0.10244980324734683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453492574879882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05917347262775484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11623703726341462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12124675708752945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506099596385508,0.0,0.2489780829402161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066585087327496,0.0,0.10001031236746684,0.0,0.09510954887899724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337292061065808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435992138726805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398056715639331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851995421366187,0.19778784906230498,0.0,0.1243250427021051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201665226306394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469010702306896,0.0,0.0,0.129655158562323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103378589059573,0.09899389296707332,0.0,0.0,0.13150313896216342,0.0,0.4354331167037381,0.0,0.08991548066987694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360690717139515,0.26970062450373405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219918338256738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16091275750989004,0.247663211759408,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yourmomsacrackhead,2020/03/08,"Do I have ptsd? I have anxiety depression and add (diagnosed). So I never thought I’d have ptsd. I usually handle myself well with others despite my mental problems or suicidal thoughts. I like to think I’m a good person. However, my family was and still is abusive(don’t want to get into specifics) I still love them but I’m trying to separate myself.  I went through a traumatic time in abusive residential treatment centers for a year (as a minor) I have tried to kill myself 4 times. That should be enough background info

Interactions w my family always leads to fights and me having anxiety attacks or feeling very very off. More suicidal thoughts, I get angrier, more anxious, easily triggered. Same thing with when I think about or talk about my past in treatment. I rarely eat more that 1 meal a day sometimes none. I don’t sleep even though I stay in bed all day when I can

Recently I realized while I do constantly deal w these disorders (completely unmedicated) it seems as if when the things I said earlier conspire those problems I have get heightened. I never noticed how situational it was and how every time it’s basically the same trigger. 

I took a screening test online that said it’s very probable I have ptsd. My mom is also a psychologist and was a therapist but now teaches at a college. She agrees that I have ptsd (even though she’s one of my triggers) so I appreciate that at least she can recognize she’s a trigger even though she is a terrible terrible person. Anyway, I strongly believe I have it bc of how I act when confronted with a trigger. My mother seems to agree. Do you think I have PTSD? At first I didn’t think so Bc I thought only veterans rlly got it.",3.4824660838106722,5.978616295950157,4.916922922319369,78.25381067229428,76.07165109034267,8.503306200381871,29.981006933976484,9.19923166143015,3.0871701537533927,1345,63,238,35,31,448,171,321,0.17600000000000002,0.728,0.096,-0.9874,1,0,0,0,1,1,35.0,0,1,1,3,24,14,4,0,14,0,25,5,1,9,3,47,48,28,3,5,6,2,1,1,0,1,1,2,1,2,16,10,2,0,13,0,0,4,5,9,1,2,13,4,47,5,25,33,9,35,0,1,1,1,18,9,0,6,22,174,63,4,0.0,0.09705272095774896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550526361662798,0.06815762344749897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253254220591304,0.09253762159274677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318710476226814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228714986713499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588352337264311,0.08851813277361352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565335751713896,0.08444801922283265,0.0705509729355547,0.08313929440203885,0.0,0.0,0.09387863090154397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381676674873556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463733719559811,0.0,0.16230697150391107,0.0,0.06901467394044948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15443931628681634,0.0,0.04141733707788838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967458914800556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283874405577266,0.0,0.0,0.06870417915165923,0.06551277604482321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09062386084914116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040018228664000566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392907917980587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254836632116343,0.0,0.0,0.09593473516171824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635168287446225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932577347587676,0.0,0.0,0.0555059171813303,0.062298020843227435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819459103173028,0.0,0.14304538045435292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831534985380915,0.1567580815795717,0.4787556730132898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087854749049525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558347740518219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491398242648504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207289500196024,0.08197148974626785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101339246146205,0.0,0.0,0.08730764887589414,0.130830590908423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17919759618166614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658380309946054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510653274690647,0.10883782946787827,0.20994446368202666,0.2414353557246897,0.26011697285017576,0.14329122139850836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910076166180392,0.1112261953475451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021486301552033,0.20275876141605154,0.0483140166553943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364902521684649,0.07593355392747889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05274885726186795
mentalhealth,ukiyiou,2020/03/08,"my social anxiety is ruining my life. i get suicidal. whenever i'm suicidal at school, i always doodle ways i can kill myself. it's weird i know. and there are periods where im all happy and glad im alive. then out of no where something happens that ruins my mood, overthink or makes me anxious then get suicidal all over again. what is wrong with me. this all comes from my social anxiety. im mainly suicidal because of it. i can never live my life like a normal person since im so afraid of people and their thoughts about me. like yesterday, my teacher asked if i was ready for the quiz since i was absent, and i said yes. i was overthinking and in the middle of the quiz, i thought i wasn't ready yet. when i got up and told her she was silent for a while and said.. ukiyiou.. next time when you're not ready for the test don't take it at all. she sounded so pissed. i became anxious for the rest of the day and was suicidal. instances where i get anxious, are the main culprit for my suicidal thoughts. i was on the verge of crying but held it in. as i was waiting for the class to be over, i doodled pictures of a noose, knives, coffins, you name it. i constantly get suicidal thoughts but i'll never act on them since i have a huge fear of pain. so doodling kinda relieves me i guess. it's weird though. i also get irritable and because of it i punched my bf one time and took my anger on him. i felt bad after cause he didn't do anything. i talked to him about it and he said it was okay but i'm still feeling guilty. just a small vent. i have no one to talk to about my problems so over here is fine. i can't talk to my bf about this cause he gets sad whenever i do. he worries too much.",0.6046479791395072,2.7813997994350292,2.283333333333335,94.85921121251629,84.90395480225989,5.551673185571492,21.788787483702738,6.900799576094004,0.4863903520208606,1315,45,296,17,39,430,175,354,0.23399999999999999,0.69,0.077,-0.996,0,0,1,0,0,1,42.0,0,1,2,0,22,22,3,2,14,2,24,4,1,3,6,44,53,28,9,3,7,0,2,2,2,0,3,4,0,1,13,14,0,2,7,0,0,3,9,14,0,2,22,6,51,7,40,30,8,41,0,3,0,0,26,19,1,4,20,194,64,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05955174139793201,0.061963038414713976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393507503048213,0.25238169605375405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0612805191613443,0.0,0.06961718702625026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062177365328794074,0.0907895591286274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299754992138645,0.0,0.06414727437606782,0.0,0.08047305912412113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179920113107236,0.048025464499365685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379679344410274,0.03765307413292045,0.0,0.07150060839641842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334375968191755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595585710503363,0.0,0.08203449632457169,0.0,0.0658514843529212,0.07927218296671397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217513012443836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238740564964757,0.0,0.04092546510651878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051973867874662,0.0727622506352887,0.0,0.06575628666993312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049707725108011164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054742280625869284,0.0,0.11486806293568548,0.0,0.07919717542782083,0.0,0.07296247205036074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009223944317826,0.0,0.07923881478748519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051626482273273495,0.06502226717872521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125547033057747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21250732352102653,0.0,0.0,0.07536522300756396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18480119343764728,0.0,0.0,0.15182075341558665,0.0,0.057328824153194485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059469950096798875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5701885484026146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599039446587023,0.17956279447493978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731640740230262,0.2364759386519659,0.08684535450727451,0.0,0.0,0.07115701719126931,0.08273628332828926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05910894306834344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562549884038784,0.0,0.0,0.08141866955784849,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,miss-lee,2020/03/08,"Can anxiety or GAD cause you to believe you have other mental disorders? Say for instance, I read too much into my symptoms and then convince myself I have BPD or OCD. But really it’s just my anxiety obsessively reading into how I’m feeling? I’m very confused and have been in a constant state of turmoil for over a week because I’m over analyzing my feelings-actions (etc.) pls help.",5.510135135135137,6.5934913648648665,6.9252432432432425,71.77245945945947,67.78378378378379,9.163243243243244,37.77297297297297,9.3871,3.894424864864865,307,17,51,6,5,105,56,74,0.139,0.759,0.102,-0.4124,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,3,2,0,5,1,0,2,0,12,9,7,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,8,1,9,8,2,9,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,3,3,37,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3416141270236008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610820011434538,0.0,0.0,0.2515578533019647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28121083243959305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293680170007391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412842036067505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558959388660231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490139976537041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128960686270776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965854097650585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22501171458033165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16413502516485046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4466768565572176,0.0,0.14303760805442706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17755963215712806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320713399379005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18422773857978209,0.0,0.0,0.17910014855501272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DassaTheSadfinder,2020/03/08,"What is this? Wanted to get an opinion from all of you about something that’s hard to google. I don’t really have genuine feeling anymore. And I absolutely hate it. If something is presented to me, for example someone is telling me about there day, my inner voice tells me how I should react. So if someone is having a bad day, my brain says “show empathy, say ‘man that sucks’” I don’t just genuinely react to things anymore, excluding anger, and love. I feel a flurry of excitement and happiness when I see my wife after a long day without having to think about it, but I also go from 0-100 instantly if someone were to cut me off on the road. 

Is there a term for this? Anyone know how to help this? I just want to feel normal again.",3.659240348692403,5.006145945205482,4.861706102117065,83.84674346201744,72.42465753424658,8.048816936488171,27.65628891656289,8.575989854853784,1.981802739726028,572,21,114,10,11,189,93,146,0.076,0.8270000000000001,0.09699999999999999,0.4543,0,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,0,13,8,4,0,6,0,12,2,1,4,1,25,25,12,0,7,7,1,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,9,3,0,0,5,1,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,8,16,3,21,23,2,14,0,0,1,1,9,4,1,4,9,82,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888160548725744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196598196019442,0.1126885781124668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13456396875106313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799106670373248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31180946973103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24446583081531995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420076265585967,0.0,0.09159237159883056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17156049464549336,0.14436995842042033,0.1591146185619565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802383703688756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857070380185451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14262375480450204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14545546252056188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579050472316866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324483428609177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563258019665229,0.0,0.0,0.12842565914035706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4096574293902196,0.24814155637158056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28172628429417146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706921417539184,0.10326643252998204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901156545381704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535491392657694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plsdontthrowawaymi,2020/03/08,"Just wanted to vent. Lengthy bit of text inside. I'm 18 years old and in college and I live alone. I get shitfaced drunk alone every weekend just to forget the drudgery of the school week a bit. I fear becoming too independent on the alcohol, but I do end up not drinking when my family comes to visit for a month or so.

I have a hard time thinking of myself in third-person, if that makes sense. It feels like all I am the protagonist of a first person game that has no cutscenes. I have no long term dreams, and I also cannot think of the future. I promised myself suicide in 2017, but I was too afraid to do it. I jumped off a building in 2018, but it happened in the spur of the moment so it wasn't very high. I landed on my back, stood up and walked away and had no medical issues thereafter, save for a few days of lower back pain and some bruises on my arms and wrists after I hit the wall of the adjacent building.

As I said, I can't think of my future. Even 2 years is hard to imagine, 5+ is impossible. It's hard to be genuinely happy, but large material purchases do give me some semblance of joy sometimes. I am afraid of killing myself so that's out of the question, and now all I am doing is going with the flow. I am apathetic to my course. I keep my grades above failing, but I don't put in effort to excel in something I have no passion for. I have no friends where I am now. I cannot talk about this to anyone I know. I don't think I'm depressed, as calling myself that would be disrespectful to those who actually suffer from it.

If I died in an accident tomorrow, I wouldn't even mind. I wouldn't have any regrets. I don't hate my life per se, but find it difficult to 'live', instead of just existing.",3.101182934712348,4.0979388823529455,4.572843137254903,86.73356334841631,73.34173669467788,7.509114414996767,26.335811247575954,7.882392219407189,1.3658266321913382,1339,45,291,18,26,448,189,357,0.18600000000000005,0.6940000000000001,0.121,-0.9649,1,2,3,0,0,2,41.0,0,0,0,4,19,19,2,3,18,0,32,9,2,2,2,48,52,24,3,7,13,0,4,1,1,3,4,1,0,1,14,11,3,1,9,5,1,7,15,11,0,1,5,5,42,8,49,41,8,49,0,4,0,1,10,20,0,6,23,202,56,5,0.0,0.0,0.11045933468065584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209681207029268,0.0,0.23446612501923414,0.0,0.09051982344034283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697463024460513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07914667229601133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634787079530388,0.17407574894659572,0.0,0.0,0.1250119774591745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471533010257417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11558197100686833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750512435732953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299965483921178,0.0,0.09749234276876824,0.0,0.1174757133135408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088533922296616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025476063793007,0.0,0.0,0.14952486352502664,0.0,0.09536937575649293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670760539448633,0.12737278154036422,0.0572334165633057,0.08086458567971362,0.0,0.0,0.10345569100552024,0.09628129343723348,0.0,0.0,0.08745207282911334,0.0,0.059138293167089725,0.1085843467926787,0.06432977983369505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10009555719084184,0.12049528422567145,0.30419414229592656,0.11175393978491237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959385589091448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181433294576388,0.0,0.10061049713392896,0.1252304842486601,0.0,0.06220751549315125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995105310822677,0.055300029235224236,0.0,0.19990170966391296,0.10017160365509817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755567241994122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140293111734174,0.0,0.0,0.11429193280763175,0.0,0.09034899600198176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877625427040607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044456393401565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19767026140778465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11378950282800647,0.12680125609605125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767177669563573,0.0,0.0,0.11455662790112225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714094531196756,0.11195005678983702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12381397976070985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097966502616582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29011616373299315,0.0,0.0,0.06600332729216765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933954834112224,0.06676373799417748,0.0,0.09079601737646724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804085463076342,0.0,0.0,0.1457842311411471
mentalhealth,weescve,2020/03/08,"Recovery Led to a Creative Pitfall Ever since I began recovering from an extensive episode of severe mental illness years ago, my creative drive has started to gradually plummet.

I'm not saying that my recovery was a bad thing, I'm immeasurably grateful that I'm past that part of my life. But ever since then, I've found it harder and harder to make anything creative and it's beginning to put me in a new sort of funk. I feel like artistic expression is one of the only things that I really enjoy and not being able to actually express myself artistically is making me lose enjoyment in my daily life. I'm not trying to focus on it and often times I'm able to go entire days without letting it affect me, but overall I still want to make things like I used to back in the day. I don't force myself to create art just for the sake of creating it, but even when I feel like I want to make something I just never find myself able to do it. It's only gotten worse with the passage of time and I fear its only going to get worse at this rate if that's even a possibility. 

Is it likely that my improving mental state could be resulting in this lack of a creative drive? If so, do you have any suggestions for things that might help me get past this? I'm sure the connection between mental health and artistic development is probably an obvious connection that I'm only now realizing, but regardless I still felt the need to post this to get it out of my system.",7.861809194265938,6.448070200692045,8.711233316856157,69.37454152249138,63.2560553633218,11.578942165101335,35.521749876421154,10.608840637214634,3.6918144340088968,1164,43,214,24,14,398,151,289,0.078,0.778,0.14300000000000002,0.9395,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,1,13,10,0,1,13,0,15,4,0,8,5,48,43,15,0,8,12,0,3,4,0,1,4,1,0,0,26,8,0,0,6,4,0,6,6,3,0,1,5,4,25,7,36,33,2,37,0,1,0,0,6,7,0,5,25,148,51,0,0.29181639564636885,0.0,0.0949235690432367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622587584890756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614838528337592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004667641621256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07479626516698122,0.08121816706190957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776638822024662,0.0,0.0,0.12546495588255385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849465142563488,0.17597642444405645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094581916298039,0.0983674251602874,0.1389824609049592,0.0933965009141232,0.0,0.08890496630700832,0.0,0.0,0.10665387187913636,0.0,0.0,0.1524620224476646,0.0,0.11056398837153872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339572754074393,0.0,0.0,0.06519945959204711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946734523803802,0.13741236685408556,0.1900890009297546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882263432837297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597196134471997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29408229086278426,0.10319036013939513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212605325988647,0.07502226474420952,0.09394603111277387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591411398588629,0.2959193581859625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533623972828576,0.18571451290526006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965971329071134,0.09315981384231242,0.0,0.10487581023029023,0.0,0.0,0.0977853592846366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06231501847897693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735470349015898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988982161524813,0.0,0.16092902535073486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748848394092496,0.0,0.0,0.06884971560308181,0.0,0.15536330034519705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167783313050548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584931287266496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344032468445835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604139243752997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401189049291591,0.0,0.0,0.1147472472362214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09376686397024556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19825722515719726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626400637399697
mentalhealth,derenbergii,2020/03/08,"Multiple Diagnoses? For context, I am a 20 year old who has been seeing a therapist and psychiatrist for around 2 years now for GAD and Chronic Major Depression.

I will make this short and sweet; wrote down a long-ass post and decided to delete it all. Can ADHD appear from the shadows of a deep depression? Or, I mean, I guess what I'm trying to ask is if I can have ADHD, Depression, and anxiety? 

I've been going about my mental health progress around my experience with depression and anxiety, because all symptoms of ADHD I thought were just a part of being a teenager - moody, cant stay on task, forgetful and disorganized. But now that I am nearing 21 and nearing my 7th year of attempting to get better (2 on treatment), I am very confused on what is typical teenager behavior and what is ADHD.

I am going to get some testing done next therapy session on ADHD, but let's say I was diagnosed, what then? I'm already on two different anti depressants and xanax as needed. How will my therapy be different, and how might my medication change? What if I am so happy to be on my current meds, and they say I have to change them? 

I know this is a lot of what ifs, but this is three different mental illnesses that I have to work with at a young age. I've taken some online tests of ADHD and took one last session with my therapist that turned out to be moderate-extreme ADHD.

I guess I just want to know what should I expect for having so many illnesses. I want to know how I can get better, but I feel like I went from being a child to being an adult. I never learned what being a teenager was like, so a lot of my symptoms can be synonymous with typical teenager behavior. 

Thanks for reading this far.",6.7300831669993375,6.1768889610778475,7.61552894211577,73.51248835662012,65.07784431137725,11.25455755156354,35.32202262142382,10.746095033038511,3.788806254158352,1339,56,252,32,18,452,164,334,0.10400000000000001,0.807,0.08900000000000001,-0.2834,4,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,2,5,13,14,0,1,13,0,39,10,0,4,3,61,67,29,0,8,10,0,1,2,0,4,10,2,0,2,17,20,0,0,8,1,0,5,2,7,0,3,11,5,32,7,44,43,8,36,0,5,1,0,9,16,0,13,15,188,49,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.609821422669816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999309712255538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109073337657252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906064578592955,0.06776716121252009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044188446507924826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12822075148043713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533668929674857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3121721105861681,0.14714903523633568,0.0,0.22720582932474376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741811207395251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709078706133693,0.0,0.0,0.03665247123458827,0.05178595090936528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361708173258547,0.0,0.08239401197633901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15970897920132668,0.0,0.0,0.07716558269939976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705211198303101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951370243637112,0.059087975872889664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412462010014856,0.0,0.07082864705705691,0.0,0.0,0.06415022974261878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325462280597416,0.0,0.0,0.04838677867912214,0.07349217722741863,0.0,0.07896145903524474,0.08051861851200029,0.07302475194820343,0.1461031459535329,0.07689906898616099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05374946204121315,0.055907764099957916,0.0,0.07709256843097764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606471017124886,0.0,0.04912022781697077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784982119905965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942414913292783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250832927672482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529186780738435,0.0,0.0,0.0577641189575602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726332291632676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068705606647026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673786758196687,0.16579432108509767,0.16832996525932814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057547940896646624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053762712818002,0.04921507770818327,0.07884690387021669,0.07081093938519607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05981077969343194,0.08551144185629726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719776300038442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05277264625593953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400410632252016
mentalhealth,BooMotek,2020/03/08,"Looking for advice. I can only describe my self as a guy with no ambition. Beyond that i have mixed feelings about the world im living in for one i hate ""humans"" and for the other i understand that we all are just trying to live our lives. I dont think that i have any delusions but i am also pretty sure that as soon as my diabetic mother kicks the bucket ill have absolutely no reason to continue on, and even now i can credit marijuana for keeping me functional at all. Side note its been a while since my last smoke,l which might be the reason for my current state being so pitiful that i decided to seek help from anonymous people. I don't even know what im trying to achieve by this.",3.9053571428571416,4.975238821428576,5.378571428571429,81.43642857142858,71.5,7.885714285714287,26.142857142857146,8.238735603445708,1.6472285714285708,545,17,107,8,10,184,98,140,0.11199999999999999,0.79,0.098,-0.2322,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,0,1,9,4,1,0,6,0,13,2,0,2,3,18,20,9,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,10,4,0,1,7,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,1,2,17,2,20,16,2,13,0,1,1,0,7,6,0,1,6,82,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631188244953114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349120956292754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135158698556618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19563683143521332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205070020363252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844031474441598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528366217420404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16480554234777486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188743818921798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.360618928794668,0.0,0.0,0.14837210730958938,0.0,0.0,0.09173854048177828,0.13606752755787233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4421979628747248,0.0,0.14017637371133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17708283341704315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311384174865928,0.12695526583039188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572594524293185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16982444971552407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3432568672449463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17414093765230074,0.0,0.0,0.13808347867792578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732642497181176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695987944562574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22666452331102885,0.0,0.0,0.1737765659111041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QueenOfFailure,2020/03/08,"Help me process this This past summer I graduated college and moved out on my own. My parents informed me today that they put an offer in on a house 1,000 miles away and have 30 days to sell the house they have lived in since I was 2. I have some really mixed feelings and honestly don't know what I should think.

All of my trauma happened in this house and while it never really felt like a home to me, it still makes me sad that in 30 days I may never step foot in it again. I don't remember the majority of my childhood, and pretty much all of the memories I have of that house are horrible ones. But there are a few good ones.... Mainly of pets I had there, certain toys that kept me company as a kid, or neighbors that let me hang out with them when stuff got bad. 

Should I be upset over this? How to I begin to process the loss of the place that was hell on earth for so many years? I used to love going to school every day because it meant I got out of there, why am I upset that I might never go back?",4.7770125786163495,4.213328650943397,5.493396226415096,87.14389937106918,69.09433962264151,8.764779874213838,26.157232704402517,8.07648339933343,1.225140251572328,782,18,180,9,12,255,125,212,0.125,0.794,0.081,-0.8676,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,3,1,9,12,1,2,10,0,18,2,1,3,6,33,33,12,0,2,2,1,2,1,1,4,0,0,3,1,17,9,0,1,7,1,1,6,5,7,0,2,8,2,27,5,29,19,8,38,1,2,0,1,10,15,1,4,18,130,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560097816271395,0.09461085916504357,0.10273401417012808,0.07500459214296037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380536095883741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366726707146104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221317727222775,0.0,0.11813856179539245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985396074512782,0.1032008713855002,0.19681409946793904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880466373675768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08247172335849774,0.0,0.12342005735495935,0.0,0.0,0.5678907268140346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06762006221941229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581765908802522,0.0,0.06011156992812019,0.0,0.10864737112615344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104921834874078,0.0,0.08213075785066068,0.12474416310725288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052695356570124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13077300723071422,0.09044922060920424,0.0,0.2846901877297369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16675139972257008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662236132320793,0.0,0.11745646380977827,0.0,0.0,0.12855155519704473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517683185097245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236900911432946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764630557473922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938135714821154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452396217580465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178070602211998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826062367927356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085239609073905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883964215160631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166283887800682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626783465550847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102527672303934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923430715906715
mentalhealth,the_shattered_mind,2020/03/08,How do I get the voices to stop Please help me I can't take it anmore,-2.2188235294117646,-0.6044867058823513,0.9132352941176478,103.65455882352943,92.52941176470587,3.4000000000000004,8.5,3.1291,-2.339094117647059,54,0,15,0,2,19,16,17,0.121,0.604,0.275,0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924533843660768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751977504380571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6144523531416615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4679874449669126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4208725734840241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Porcelain-Ink,2020/03/08,"How do you heal emotional trauma without any support? Basically it seems like the typical advice includes external help such as support from loved ones and professionals. I don't have anyone that close to me and my therapist, who I visit once a month, is currently working on a different issue (severe social anxiety) with me.

I'm going through some stuff that's taking a toll on my health and my studies (which has heavy workload and requires creative thinking). I do not have the time to fully address my issues so I just want to focus on getting through the school semester which is about 2 more months. It's getting increasingly difficult to stay stable and consistent in my performance. I am healing, but it's very VERY slow. I know you shouldn't be impatient when it comes to this but I just need to \*hold it together\* you know. I feel that I can deal with things in my own time at my own pace but life doesn't agree with that, it's work and work and work. 

Healing isn't a linear path and I'm worried that my little relapses will prevent me from passing my fine arts course. I've had a big relapse and I'm procrastinating, I slept for an entire day and a half and I still feel EXHAUSTED. I can't keep on relying on caffeine too. Focusing is hard. Thinking is hard. Just really tired.

So, is it possible to get through stressful periods in life with trauma and without external support? All the success stories I hear always involve at least another person. I don't have anyone :) would like to hear your experiences with being alone, if any. Thanks for reading this long ass post and sorry if it's messy.",4.395779220779222,6.347918032467536,5.2290857142857154,79.51591428571432,71.59740259740259,8.434493506493508,30.826493506493502,9.065960079200117,2.8289624415584416,1286,57,231,27,25,418,176,308,0.161,0.7490000000000001,0.08900000000000001,-0.9724,2,1,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,4,0,7,11,14,0,1,11,0,24,11,2,1,1,49,51,23,0,6,11,0,4,2,0,3,8,2,1,1,20,20,0,4,7,2,0,5,9,5,0,2,2,6,30,9,34,44,7,31,0,0,0,2,14,13,1,4,13,156,50,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007271471375461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675827086588058,0.0,0.0,0.0857695949262647,0.0,0.0,0.140193871072513,0.1080868269396138,0.07885479378733541,0.0,0.0,0.14414981061195964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879302693382445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647712477698896,0.10626943890798993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769512535289792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594947295860887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083058216740344,0.0,0.0,0.10423920449137676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156283352130546,0.0,0.058581904398042076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846762335007025,0.0,0.0,0.10956765788157988,0.23235399106038016,0.0,0.0690913662736234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151744106523004,0.0,0.09162093418905408,0.0,0.0,0.11329852938656282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14561482914498255,0.10071792672823636,0.10331176738468087,0.0,0.0912212559081046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303239834070794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16455259943155834,0.0,0.0,0.07643142435274937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977527099291164,0.06984868004267526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000419701468831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620555544226067,0.09872073879806964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310642513610452,0.0,0.06603474619295423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432097608937442,0.0,0.09383882291922777,0.0,0.11644939946539612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507558098347727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538797586751105,0.0,0.10986799860793522,0.08231864770653953,0.0,0.11807610856127615,0.0,0.11800025623958295,0.0,0.3509168850413148,0.0,0.0,0.07750222674618061,0.0,0.0,0.09490086195920887,0.0,0.11968211882896905,0.06848079549974641,0.13209712058761694,0.0,0.0,0.12021184028231895,0.11847360748534758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17010116604003586,0.06079838803337904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19872805030695345,0.0,0.3001695918081941,0.10468125139738932,0.0,0.07322403068620605,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moellere,2020/03/08,"Family issues I don't really know how to start this stop I'm just gonna start talking.

So, for the past year and a half, my dad has been working out of state and he only comes home about once every 1-2 weeks. Just recently though, he switched jobs and is working closer to home and will be home about 4 nights a week.

My sister has been having a few struggles with school for the past couple of years and my dad hates mad at her because she hasn't been doing her homework. They've argued several times but as my sister's grades get worse, I'm scared they'll argue more and more. 

I hate having to listen to my dad yelling and my sister cry screaming. I can't do anything because I'm supposed to be asleep. The most I can do is cry into my pillow and turn up my music.

I'm scared to tell the guy I'm dating because he might not like my dad and might do something to piss my dad off. I most likely should but I can't. Not after what happened when I told him about my sister socially isolating me my whole childhood. I'll talk about the social isolation thing in a different post. 

I just wanted to rant a little bit, sorry if things is too long. Thank you for reading.",3.159081726354452,4.3030479752066135,4.183911845730027,89.01202938475667,73.3801652892562,6.700091827364558,22.9485766758494,6.937597516519254,0.6238615243342509,918,23,194,8,18,298,142,242,0.22,0.767,0.013000000000000001,-0.9941,2,1,1,0,1,0,20.0,0,1,1,2,12,13,6,3,10,0,26,2,2,1,0,30,45,17,0,3,8,9,0,2,0,6,0,3,5,1,4,13,0,1,1,1,0,1,6,10,0,1,4,3,27,3,26,33,7,28,0,0,0,0,28,8,1,5,19,121,31,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016167814831476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003672403907991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961530103550093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437951873676312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123026908498875,0.24070139568338556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11447085939166207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231223328465732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328700680157643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05724256735029716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848539504300474,0.09688691315073092,0.0,0.0,0.21634315372357946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.329704296690964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435614948100548,0.10872517299168674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021340327239956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705468414608643,0.10981171858098106,0.0,0.09696052188407137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324597711095585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281821130252727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668187923394302,0.0,0.08332821275392381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091821033639284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493184137132117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095934570432659,0.0,0.07018938063954214,0.0,0.10818104205069594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21938496977842925,0.11088442254370233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237759164007339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22337300814392289,0.0,0.08434757183294507,0.0,0.122647712398646,0.1550996537702791,0.0,0.0,0.0916002490300446,0.0,0.11453988047390587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17612647656412098,0.0957635969935944,0.10087163360349638,0.0,0.0,0.1455786506026793,0.0,0.10764588460348247,0.0,0.06388753725425694,0.0,0.0,0.10469291334007336,0.0,0.0,0.11917396054343928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462357237621591,0.0,0.17577095521260372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232407834798467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952751354777914,0.0,0.111654880161775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14111099970589622
mentalhealth,UncertifiedPlayer,2020/03/08,"Why do I feel depressed when I don’t work? First of all, I work with Uber EATS on bicycle (food delivery service). It’s a commission job meaning the more deliveries you do, the more you’re paid. There’s no salary. Every time I either get less deliveries or don’t work, I get depressed. I haven’t felt like this for years. Every time I’m not busy it happens. I don’t stress over my job or money, I just start feeling depressed when I’m not busy or feel like I’m wasting time. Any explanation?",1.620594059405942,3.7412720990099047,3.3034554455445537,89.3676584158416,80.48514851485149,6.4162376237623775,23.961386138613854,7.554174236665415,1.0738190099009897,386,14,83,6,10,128,60,101,0.184,0.7490000000000001,0.067,-0.9092,3,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,4,4,6,0,1,3,0,6,2,0,0,1,14,19,5,0,0,7,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,5,0,2,0,7,4,0,1,2,4,10,2,5,17,5,10,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,3,10,43,13,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370162607565998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4320269367001528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17108717983542074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817461562822866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536237916999761,0.1194476005211129,0.1605380687407568,0.0,0.0,0.1422201001770772,0.2021787126076276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747100330347729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478542680800418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318400876195218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337079440578967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18212964423330572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11834490872877765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19152685408278888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924867173382529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508718511183026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.365170428913462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076712163752163
mentalhealth,oliviughh,2020/03/08,"Journaling I used to journal all the time to help with dealing with feelings but I stopped after I found out my guardian (not either of my parents) was snooping and reading my entries. I only knew he read them because he mentioned something in conversation that was NOT something I would have told him myself. 

I’m now in college and living away from this person. I’m dealing with personal stresses and I want to get back into journaling, but I seem to be uninterested in doing so. I can’t bring myself to do it every day when I never had an issue with writing even day, even if I only put a sentence or two. 

Any advice on how to make it more fun? I was thinking about getting a cute notebook and some colored pens but I worry that may also not be enough to get me interested.",4.456898395721925,5.706701130718955,5.645002970885326,79.36433155080212,70.37254901960785,7.132263814616755,32.20974450386215,7.348242739294969,2.2106653594771237,615,28,111,6,11,205,104,153,0.066,0.823,0.111,0.7175,1,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,9,4,0,1,4,0,12,0,0,3,2,35,27,13,0,3,9,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,5,10,0,1,5,2,0,2,5,1,0,1,7,2,20,3,22,16,5,18,0,0,1,0,14,7,0,5,9,90,25,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495761152110113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240829102968205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409137559899886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381226811912656,0.11769971553417807,0.0,0.09330873048709427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974321790522204,0.31561242999973776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15815998946359827,0.0,0.2021997206237108,0.0,0.1289662513605503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739569571654495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167830978629326,0.0,0.0,0.2399148758536849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259814216437303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15976304974785185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516170118249285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217396735364248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805534941364028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23282996952981455,0.0,0.0,0.1699637145805626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26730585596274536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538754501379824,0.0,0.0,0.3062185113630569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13934720665785796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356781926641489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797156260611411,0.17533868594245175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980796870037195,0.0,0.0,0.08925508456643995,0.0,0.0,0.14626287434569382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149525031558787,0.0,0.0,0.1322014620707272,0.0,0.0,0.09028337396180147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554478148583669,0.0,0.10873499708254923,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rogerdodger_,2020/03/08,Just having a hard time I’ve lost a lost of friends over the years. Lonely and crying myself to sleep. Those stupid free talk to someone apps don’t work. I can’t afford a dog. Taking any advice at this time.,0.7241860465116297,3.047552116279076,1.7593488372093056,97.7664651162791,85.97674418604653,3.44,13.251162790697672,3.1291,-1.4954520930232555,163,2,35,0,5,51,36,43,0.304,0.5670000000000001,0.13,-0.765,1,2,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,1,6,1,0,4,0,3,1,1,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,2,1,2,3,5,4,0,5,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,18,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609289623240681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181582832149475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933090538930129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20629907556802468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23919757157151605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5829679881953737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26721294996578343,0.0,0.2262452737362806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007658925857493,0.21462065086853188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114031483597944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19439382117315093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719521970370134
mentalhealth,cbobjr,2020/03/08,My turtle just died I dont know what to do I've never felt like this how do I stop it,-1.7999999999999972,-0.8510037272727242,1.5727272727272743,103.37909090909092,86.27272727272728,4.4,11.0,3.1291,-2.0085272727272727,66,0,20,0,2,24,18,22,0.345,0.655,0.0,-0.7851,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,6,5,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,13,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4548129899677827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5136016610950528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42076900330308864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408394494647101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21409677738793595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3379895740525329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3663794495624951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Howswayinthemorning,2020/03/08,Terrible person anonymously online I have said terrible things in video games and it is making me suicidal bc of it like really bad things I didn’t mean any of it of course idk. I just said the most outrageous stuff possible to get attention bc I am a very fucked up person. Idk what to do I swear I’m a great person irl I just wish I could take these things back and I can’t let it go. I am literally so disgusted and disappointed that I would ever do this looking back on it.,0.3613286713286677,2.764337797979799,2.8749494949494934,88.01447552447556,90.21212121212122,7.4905982905982915,18.726495726495727,8.384062270229773,1.3139488733488731,378,11,81,11,13,130,66,99,0.301,0.617,0.08199999999999999,-0.9748,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,3,0,3,0,11,1,0,1,1,13,22,4,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,3,13,3,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,7,0,0,3,3,11,2,8,16,1,7,0,1,1,1,6,3,1,1,4,56,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11840946902047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677793571285349,0.14538525763581164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902288036611346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750403346412672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16097371479525285,0.09097197180992976,0.0,0.09895799496673044,0.0,0.0,0.1919709921344044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17805235130163954,0.0,0.08506760055555185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14621929076065382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162283152897059,0.0,0.0,0.18967076558959986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4561119154464608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962972847797294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154751878653653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33126129652085984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993289375450864,0.1904620724281347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091866922160472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34703833646323523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366953845040442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20023261679272225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369183512462716,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tytyroy,2020/03/08,Has anyone here ever admitted themselves to a mental hospital before? and how does your family find out,5.3116666666666665,8.677683500000004,6.9311111111111146,61.40000000000003,75.1111111111111,10.266666666666667,25.66666666666667,10.125756701596842,4.1998000000000015,85,3,10,3,2,29,18,18,0.0,0.92,0.08,0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,6,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,9,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971605142911429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616322974627741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.371908640273094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38442471341111856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4006395465270864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884300559165175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4282865379699421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meopbeop,2020/03/08,"I'm going to die in 2 years Hello anyone who reads this, but I kind of want to vent a bit since I have no one and no friends to listen. Over the years I've been treated poorly by who I thought was my best friend. We did so many things together, but when we were in groups I just didn't exist. When you spend so much of your upbringing with someone who goes from treating you like dirt than their best friend, its a little screwy. Not to mention that out of everyone in our friend group I do not show my emotions or list of my many mental disorders like they do. So its made them closer and have more of a pack mentality. Since I do not feel the same as them I've feel so alone with them. Over the years I've been pushed further and further to the side. When I was 16 so much drama happened I started telling my self I don't matter and cried myself to sleep. This is where I initially created my plan I think. I decided when I turn 22 or 24, those containing my favorite numbers, I was going to commit suicide. As the years past I have completely convinced myself I have to do it. I will die when I'm either 22 or 24 and its gonna be me who does it. I cried for 3 hours last night thinking about how my family will be after I die. I laugh about how stupid I am and what a foolish person I am and how no one even knows what I've been planning. I am one of the most bubbly happy people you will ever meet and I live everyday to the fullest and waste no time being productive. I don't plan for the future because I do not have one. I live so freely and I have almost no anxiety or stress. 

Sadly, I do know how horrible this all is, but like I've said I completely convinced myself it will happen. I know I should be getting help, but after being with all these people who treat me like nothing who wear their mental illnesses like badges, I do not want to be classified as mentally ill. I see getting help or telling anyone as a sign of stupidity and weakness, because my whole life those people have been themselves. My ego just gets in the way I guess. The funny thing is really, that even if I told my ""Friends"", no one would care lol. Life is not like a Disney movie. They all already hate me and gang up on me for being different and threatening their perfect little worlds, where all they do is complain about stuff they can easily fix but wont and blaim it on some mental illness. 

So In 2 years I will be gone, that is ok, because no one care besides people who are close to me, which is basically no one sadly. I don't want to talk because you will get no where with me. I trust no one and I never will trust anyone to help me because its my life. I want to just disappear, to never have existed. because to pretty much everyone, I already dont exist.",4.116871156871156,4.59529801587302,5.079255445922115,85.94112827112828,70.60493827160494,8.105038371705039,26.78816912150245,8.098718942377014,1.4825003956337288,2153,65,459,28,37,706,243,567,0.174,0.617,0.209,0.9809,1,1,0,0,0,2,50.0,3,5,10,6,29,35,3,1,16,2,60,9,2,5,9,81,95,46,4,7,21,0,2,6,5,11,7,2,0,2,30,23,0,1,9,3,2,5,24,8,0,8,15,5,81,27,53,61,16,51,0,2,1,0,47,22,0,10,29,332,111,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395023739855095,0.06614349872291207,0.14095028917870425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04885553044148298,0.0,0.0,0.1339648825817678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335841917999765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340419568526066,0.0,0.06972258380360316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022652956432446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339196795546972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030247875393653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19884121067527213,0.06672393931138353,0.07319329525419276,0.0,0.05588752534880435,0.0,0.07484774207541528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183802954428656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436269946287447,0.057768343052461875,0.0,0.12204894124423435,0.0,0.0,0.060204981513267336,0.0,0.06458277783287213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24670455346220935,0.0,0.13346452049742247,0.0,0.07259038737346249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703530292381794,0.0,0.11294885960483204,0.06798406104629245,0.0,0.0630521494125206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841940937648305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289284762480425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06650418155970671,0.10529340358840948,0.05205741236339596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532638999494678,0.18720337086461405,0.12801634381387025,0.1127855759699044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06042934586069462,0.0,0.1294954690491215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32179777713379537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14084143044648031,0.0,0.09851119409904543,0.0,0.0,0.059931725222590077,0.0,0.0612789108853599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462053884333809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06096509646235325,0.17710010200906415,0.055763290675405405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497230872713357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388094940092871,0.0,0.04091270039366485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06074897193594365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050891074130729255,0.0,0.06662373281427178,0.0,0.0,0.10565737055891836,0.0,0.06390978856218002,0.0,0.05411147779151326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045203032196937006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07315561475926101,0.0,0.07310861945011678,0.06985648618971595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05133119641036001,0.11163931970105924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848563651873291,0.08184251820511475,0.0,0.05070061794578385,0.03723941779734112,0.0,0.0,0.061024470622117175,0.0,0.0,0.06946533076676502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506737817547828,0.05069200624420071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130150348645288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045366916688488974,0.0,0.0,0.20563053843096005
mentalhealth,murrayd2012,2020/03/08,"Am I the only one who feels this way? I suffer from anxiety and depression. There are days where I feel completely amazing and love myself unconditionally, talk to my friends, and help out my folks. But then there are days where my depression gets me wicked down about myself, self concious, and feelings that I’m not wanted, cared for, or even remotely interesting to anyone, including friends and family. I have been working on this issue for a long time. But the more I progress the more I feel that I keep going back into my hole. 

This brings me into my love life too. I’ve wanted to date ever since I was really young. (About 14 years old) I came into my own as a teenager and decided I wanted to seek out a soul mate and I believed in the ‘love is blind’ scenario. However, due to my anxiety and depression, and from bad experiences of dating, I find myself at a stand still... I can’t contemplate or fathom what finding love is like anymore, the moods I had about dating have shifted due to my mental issues. I seek and want to feel and to be with a man worth dating. . . I however, don’t feel I am worthy of someone else’s love or think I have a right to love them based on my own opinions of myself and the struggle of acceptance when it comes to a guy liking me. I never really learned how to go through the motions of dating either because I always tend to rush and then lose them.... I don’t want to rush, but I desire love so strongly I’m at a lost and feel it’s mixed into my anxiety and depression. Any advice or suggestions? Much appreciated.",3.692647058823528,5.282737823529415,5.038709150326799,81.64669117647061,72.72549019607844,8.10653594771242,26.148692810457522,8.72156446121922,1.9270614379084967,1218,41,236,23,24,406,162,306,0.099,0.728,0.17300000000000001,0.9695,2,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,2,5,15,26,0,1,15,0,16,9,0,1,2,57,48,28,0,6,9,0,7,2,3,0,2,0,0,3,9,24,0,1,13,0,1,8,5,9,0,1,5,8,41,16,40,42,6,46,1,7,1,7,19,15,0,5,23,166,50,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676552694219168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738812158477358,0.0,0.0,0.06038091737603742,0.0,0.2037745909412053,0.0,0.08805680235899056,0.062084724087761514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827478989451137,0.07413676711517284,0.05412616284089508,0.0,0.0,0.1000370390636961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155323736671104,0.09052833101958192,0.0,0.0,0.07648557503753386,0.09309566277565308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452568497747667,0.0,0.3059021952979056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417347800095422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058645610907632,0.08031653304133972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685462501679116,0.08370424234900249,0.0,0.3142677437972687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16230671094709126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371993958809042,0.0,0.04638962710356365,0.0,0.10092393061489907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879170389306736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951472837507137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18534944804133374,0.0,0.0789215108315715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271570147871369,0.0867575845582851,0.0,0.0,0.07857723128390819,0.0,0.09933440497262698,0.09692585337341704,0.0,0.5609613402028927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948043317193499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527159342716751,0.0,0.06848108460210224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317120683199707,0.0,0.06016707215824866,0.06752954830284834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376356251014814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582701956487099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262836624992672,0.0,0.0,0.07344882374287519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523231694582216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090859860920452,0.0,0.0,0.0928236204214146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136683371375463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056893680606678015,0.0,0.0,0.05177473979553477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618561293981907,0.07047815428506803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464089757673801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057178485867944065
mentalhealth,thro0wa4wa4y1,2020/03/08,"I'm not sure if I'm going insane, have anxiety disorder or in a toxic relationship. Any advice is helpful. Mid-20s F. Sorry for long post, I'm not sure where to start. Possible wrong subreddit, please advice me if that is the case.

For the past 5 or so years, I have found myself feeling emotions very strongly, and it can change quickly. A sunny day could put me in the greatest mood and then an hour later a small inconvenience could ruin that mood and last all day. I find I either feel very happy, or very anxious/stressed/down. When I am down, all I can focus on are the negatives in my life and ruminate.

I was in an unhappy relationship for 5+ years, and we broke up over year ago. I stayed for much longer than I should have because I still cared for him and I was so used to having him in my life I couldn't picture it without him, even though I was very unhappy in our relationship. It was going badly for so long, it's hard to say how I was before. Currently, I have been with someone new for about a year. It started off casual but I fell in love. I find my emotions almost entirely dependent on how things are going between us/seeing him/talking to him. 

In this current relationship, I feel that he makes me so incredibly happy. I have never felt so comfortable and able to be myself and have so much fun just doing nothing together. He has trouble being emotional with me, and I do believe he is insecure. He claims he never does these things ""as a test"" (as I like to say) but he will sometimes get irrationally mad at me about nothing as if to see my reaction (which is always me crying and freaking out that he is going to leave me). I have never been one to act like this, I was always a firm believer in self-worth. Perhaps leftover issues from my previous relationship, but I put up with any bullshit he puts me through because I love him so much. He has a bit of a drug problem, and will sometimes go on a bender and we won't speak for a few days. In these times, I am absolutely miserable. I find myself thinking over and over ""I wish I was dead"". I don't have any actively suicidal thoughts, but sometimes my anxiety and being so upset gets so unbearable I will give myself small cuts to distract from it. When these things happen, I also start to list all the things about my life I don't like (job, weight, etc) and get into a spiral of believing no one really cares about me or could ever understand me.

I'm not sure what to do with myself anymore. I'm currently in a state of repeating over and over in my head that I wish I was dead, and all I want to do is sleep but 1.5 mg of Ativan later I am still awake and miserable.

Any advice would be helpful.",4.193125471840556,5.0887279068901305,5.517942523529115,81.35182847652123,70.67597765363129,8.710433338366299,28.293774221148524,8.994212911058018,2.1928140218430725,2094,74,419,39,37,703,241,537,0.168,0.708,0.124,-0.9679,4,0,1,0,0,0,69.0,3,0,0,1,26,32,2,5,19,0,54,9,2,5,11,82,90,49,3,13,18,0,6,3,0,6,4,3,0,0,22,26,1,0,11,1,0,10,13,14,0,2,13,10,67,16,69,63,12,77,1,4,1,2,30,30,0,9,37,305,89,2,0.061958699694827285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18163597277622767,0.0549226489054444,0.0,0.06204268782874154,0.0,0.0,0.04954834976089174,0.10310920310808687,0.0,0.0,0.1685361617873065,0.0,0.09479647135624834,0.06999569481244829,0.06144638129801485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05173292622856559,0.07553889650821538,0.0,0.052722289966435305,0.2094187120663034,0.0,0.0,0.06764285290422142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634204733949647,0.0,0.0655440888467291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840694024312026,0.0,0.06805872225836622,0.11987470676347815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07101003770027738,0.0,0.05422047563525255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185242106072426,0.0,0.0,0.20908559323107725,0.0,0.0,0.0691003282023329,0.040923136802019616,0.056045191076472135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939845406489917,0.0,0.059490068128642784,0.0,0.1698873871337561,0.0,0.0,0.06793451619892442,0.0,0.0,0.0971125900185699,0.059436430485167877,0.17606278437682565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054789873518387724,0.13191237588496602,0.05550282499768853,0.0,0.06358750097218753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305922074421193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061016838569777625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466878510585372,0.06148444906291663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05050460976877358,0.0,0.0656053168468274,0.0,0.0,0.13128978579268358,0.0908096730482548,0.0,0.0,0.10966299900669416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118402910074494,0.0,0.041357913163485166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366403200051669,0.0,0.143359106511983,0.059840098254359535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890208678511655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396963683393288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05914658963171581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801204641659953,0.0,0.06984912444022151,0.059339307341146716,0.0,0.0,0.05928610790278083,0.0,0.18685681890296085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039692329567684995,0.0,0.0,0.33260228038090395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854408967487648,0.0,0.0,0.04937306183688575,0.0,0.06463643647200924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062003445526756684,0.0,0.05249740518784704,0.0,0.18383621483409934,0.06935769167490206,0.13156405963102788,0.06603973000737336,0.09896059522320846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677727611622525,0.0,0.17518602363384864,0.0,0.0,0.04980005586087078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646504278878078,0.03970063298180256,0.06087410786866701,0.04918828670377751,0.036128616050718036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450119147321938,0.07452868695939695,0.053512423271993036,0.0,0.2044896643527648,0.036544846374564614,0.0,0.0,0.07544900445741866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249889378796246,0.059725975504458836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0440136825812663,0.0677421116766677,0.0,0.15959748483081848
mentalhealth,gatorlatorade,2020/03/08,"I’ve come to the conclusion that there is something fundamentally wrong with me and I don’t know how to fix it I find that I tend to drive people away. Not to say that I don’t have friends, but I find it very hard to make new ones. I find it hard to keep people around anymore, and I seem to be the common denominator in these situations. 
I know I can be lazy and irresponsible and these are things I’ve taken steps to work on. I’ve gotten better, yes, but I always feel as if I’m taking one step forward and two steps back. The improvement never seems to be enough, and in some cases, I’m just worse than before. 
Whether or not these things have to do with my inability to make new connections, I’m not sure. I just feel as if something is wrong with me.",4.18,4.485813783439493,5.264210191082803,85.2842133757962,70.40127388535029,8.318216560509553,24.6171974522293,8.238735603445708,1.1016323566878978,592,14,134,8,10,196,85,157,0.166,0.753,0.081,-0.9197,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,6,5,0,0,3,1,12,0,0,3,2,39,29,15,0,2,11,0,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,11,11,0,1,10,0,0,6,6,2,0,3,2,5,14,3,22,24,2,16,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,6,6,88,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737212114385905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989230625712612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255721307441237,0.0,0.0,0.13252927256003394,0.10846541734079626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003054661251228,0.0,0.0,0.12475493881936398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150956201864226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575132306758742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426470131754673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3867752321308165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898158570769703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25272173978984713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537943540710533,0.0,0.0,0.15504432226843287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18831552752834974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879314945961513,0.27247070289966224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911700234274284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19558465455015636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217552345163807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568290476629025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15855586564810673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171877256408359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294613586922618,0.0,0.10605857185628316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18742623728919414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137793833037855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638818327361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269239852334124,0.0,0.14375084517586695,0.0,0.30845104408070323,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Thebluewolfzspare,2020/03/08,Self-esteem Support for a loved one. My Significant other has been through multipule traumas in her past which has caused her to have extremely bad self-esteem in which she actively hates her self and constantly degrades herself i am worried about them and just want them to be safe and alright with themself i have tried helping but i have realized that i cannot help them properly so i am looking for any ways i can to help her and to support her can anyone help?,7.368426966292133,7.377708089887644,7.129528089887638,75.65114606741574,63.606741573033716,10.266067415730339,38.0247191011236,9.888512548439397,3.7477892134831454,376,18,68,7,5,119,57,89,0.192,0.634,0.175,-0.5658,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,3,0,3,9,1,0,1,1,12,1,0,1,0,11,18,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,1,1,17,5,11,16,0,5,0,0,1,1,16,2,0,0,2,53,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195789743799196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229532102806554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14682119717170003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806387527439366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19002334399654774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736081285474146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4714542599788223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476634678658644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870478063811946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11915547316578635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16786162568852928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5503264366955217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3990881188059191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938555930686165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371650100486128,0.13957564362781213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785766607790119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tushar165,2020/03/08,"I am lost I don’t really know where to start. I have tried to talk to my friends but it hasn’t worked out well. I have been dealing with a lot of stuff in my life, and it’s taking a toll on me. I tried to jump from my balcony to see if I will dies or will I live. I am not proud of it I am ashamed of myself, I don’t know what’s wrong. I feel like something is missing and it has been missing for a while. I just want someone to tell em that everything’s gonna be alright. I can’t tell my friends all this cos I am scared they’ll be worried and then I will get distant because I need someone but I don’t need someone. I need the warmth and the care but I dint need it. I don’t know what’s happening, I just don’t what to do.",-1.0535063206919515,0.6565961077844307,1.2415069860279428,102.68631902860943,87.92215568862274,4.429673985362609,19.45741849634065,5.46131890053228,-0.5929771124417829,558,17,150,3,18,187,87,167,0.156,0.696,0.149,-0.2917,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,3,4,13,0,2,5,1,24,1,0,1,1,26,43,11,1,6,8,0,1,1,2,5,1,0,0,0,11,6,0,0,4,0,0,1,8,6,1,0,3,2,28,7,16,33,2,8,0,3,1,0,7,4,0,3,4,101,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143145919953252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15292304071784074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15463132370222096,0.0,0.0,0.1556641474831485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347997886489838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758385775713181,0.10715165234037967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23176113561864234,0.0,0.0783626822072885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13263413464344678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24728889724911274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594115303862996,0.07327669408330498,0.0,0.13244239314472042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16372991808308465,0.12751466623993146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44485761632164617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608632847866656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15016442713512734,0.0,0.1195212346901112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38125373144617797,0.11546830047040504,0.0,0.0,0.10616247175361676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717006884295885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112772515172568,0.12055489254022783,0.2621927235483063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036643840226688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884669695932292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13485747047078245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109193249238485,0.15232037203469465,0.0,0.0,0.1639886311863665,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MannyNoCanny,2020/03/08,"Depression dependency? Recently I’ve felt like I’m not myself if I’m not sad, because if I don’t feel sad I don’t feel much at all. It feels like everyone else likes me more when I’m down too just because I’m actually feeling something and act more alive. I’ve learned how to “act normal” living with depression and when I start to do better I like who I am even less. Just makes itself into a shitty cycle and I’m thinking trying to get on medication might be a route I’m finally ready to take. Does anyone have advice on if I should? Or things I should try before doing it?",2.468,4.077023133333338,4.528333333333336,83.97000000000001,76.0,7.466666666666668,23.666666666666664,8.238735603445708,1.3730666666666669,456,14,94,8,10,157,75,120,0.08800000000000001,0.705,0.20600000000000002,0.8943,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,0,2,0,10,1,0,3,1,28,26,10,0,6,8,0,5,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,7,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,1,5,9,5,10,21,5,12,0,4,0,0,1,5,0,6,9,57,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.17202715920719133,0.0,0.0,0.17226208823228906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326144490321406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149214363715128,0.0,0.15000418078849392,0.0,0.0,0.1559083327124214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3036652505549092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15426678231932778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472621519420853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164335163588394,0.0,0.0,0.16844633336079115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35653671431470296,0.1259368888574684,0.16925969908306152,0.1931098368024796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210079531357264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3444926392473097,0.0,0.15566146280693638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767053151825987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758696921565928,0.0,0.1870088186871849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12958857488993442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17272029344325074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17405858038735253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571156585349434,0.0,0.0,0.12477429058768713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254317035027946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711485107868655,0.11295527813779077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393697001835401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CAPT4IN_PHANT0M,2020/03/08,"Need help about my coping So I’m on this facebook group about a video game called sea of thieves. One makes a post where i just pointed out they could just use google. 3 people got offered because I said it and starts targeting my spelling/grammar my looks and started getting comments like 

“not that you're wrong but you realize you're arguing with a 12 year old? LOL” in the past i have been heavily bullied mainly because of my grammar, spelling and how i look. It ended because they school found out I did self harm. I have been very depressed lately, so this hits me hard. Really hard...need help because I’m starting to get thoughts about doing self harm ;-;",4.427559055118111,6.2222576220472465,4.229141732283466,87.36182283464571,71.20472440944883,6.654803149606299,30.81023622047244,7.1686216300943375,1.8100935433070864,526,23,99,5,10,160,88,127,0.196,0.7070000000000001,0.09699999999999999,-0.9521,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,2,0,9,6,1,0,4,1,7,0,0,3,0,18,24,7,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,5,6,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,5,0,1,7,4,14,1,11,15,1,15,0,1,2,0,14,6,0,0,9,54,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760161146418011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15746405031377644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312288466738686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281949626933612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13658289900895132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690815858582997,0.0,0.0,0.16113508170197435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333457004806415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762809303814085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20672532240405184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739538278171363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533845036550907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589924885034861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293532561556146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11434359814617676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618158084309336,0.0,0.10449562427333256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720939711643827,0.10690870989646148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577681253748478,0.0,0.14768905043196556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987898700869929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14668753193322676,0.0,0.0,0.15606716568734547,0.0,0.0,0.3217460517688825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.327448565015648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242426953000207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318657283810048,0.0,0.12723810617548895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860271203141888,0.0,0.0993051741002093
mentalhealth,throwaway952264,2020/03/08,"Something wrong with me? I had learned that a fairly (although not too close) close family member of mine had died today. While everyone was crying about it, what was I doing? I was thinking about which Netflix show I should be binging today. I even giggled a bit, but I’m pretty sure that because I thought their crying sounded stupid. When I picture anyone else dying (except for my dog, she’s too cute and precious), I can picture the same reaction. Of course, when I was talking to the most acquainted family of the dead person I tried my best to *act* sincere, but in reality, I knew I was just putting on a show. Is there a reason why I’m not caring about this very sudden death, but instead about to go to bed and sleeping like a baby?",6.540833333333335,6.23819141666667,6.835555555555558,78.11500000000002,65.3888888888889,8.866666666666667,33.27777777777778,8.07648339933343,2.492586111111112,580,22,107,6,8,188,97,144,0.18600000000000005,0.659,0.155,-0.7391,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,1,12,10,1,0,8,0,12,1,1,1,1,21,19,9,4,1,7,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,6,5,0,0,5,3,0,3,2,2,0,0,9,1,18,8,16,8,4,13,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,7,80,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11765151555349185,0.1724025636987297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256991849274726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765788063357495,0.0,0.1836966709792568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17155259206638795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696520821694524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3492552576404941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405598918076869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113434271029342,0.0,0.0,0.16077992940036545,0.0,0.0,0.3172416762840441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956262073072414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220348450460904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691840578907567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711812180201239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16914807753032954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729996143876525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683818177899188,0.0,0.0,0.129535001097369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15858334355588682,0.0,0.0,0.1352412573310029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781440760419618,0.0,0.13357988509815305,0.0,0.0,0.3189821846724032,0.0,0.0,0.11423770030560512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13883237096924764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182875153045775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18396622652401898,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sodahhz,2020/03/08,"When I learn about a new disorder through another person, or online I tend to wish I had that disorder. I am an 18 yo male and am diagnosed with anxiety and depression. However, I would like to explain and try and get some other opinions on what I have recently realized and been going through. Recently, I came across a number of videos related to DID(Dissociative Identity Disorder) which is where your mind creates different personality's or alters. Ever since watching the videos I have been obsessed with thinking I may have DID or that I want to have it. It doesn't seem normal at all to ""want"" or fantasies about having a mental disorder that someone else has. Thinking back something very similar happened a few years ago when I was in a relationship with a girl who had anorexia. After we broke up I went into an episode where I struggled with eating and refused to do so. At that time I did not consciously WANT to not eat because It made me feel closer to her, but after seeming a therapist we agreed that was the most likely reason why I had stopped eating. Something else worth noting is sometimes I feel like there is nothing ""special"" about myself and that if I had one of these disorders then I would have something different about me even if in reality its an awful thing to have to deal with. I am hoping to see if anyone has had any similar experiences or if anyone knows what could be going on in my head.",10.740358229131468,7.885776702602232,10.309354511659349,64.70582967218658,58.92565055762082,13.647989185535653,43.413653261236895,11.911945987284742,5.148298141263939,1139,51,197,26,11,373,156,269,0.08900000000000001,0.8370000000000001,0.07400000000000001,-0.2806,3,0,3,0,0,0,21.0,2,1,0,0,13,9,0,2,12,1,33,5,1,2,2,59,55,21,0,13,12,0,2,3,0,3,1,0,0,4,17,16,3,2,12,3,1,4,3,4,0,1,14,4,27,5,36,36,4,31,0,2,2,0,13,13,0,16,17,159,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341717315604841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399368234711046,0.09867584105018552,0.07198900474848252,0.0,0.0,0.13159886548715904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235986809566093,0.0,0.057364687752869736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762946135603252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513407600528478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701669073915624,0.08105130215753689,0.0955131841753542,0.0,0.1966364888690724,0.5392544541013916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888744607600985,0.1572229835533166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215454747238771,0.08512210357221968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205138850552998,0.0,0.0,0.09516322631374337,0.06722763841377434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049165252700259315,0.0,0.1069625013606495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321551231714684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657745365285096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346611880063248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05171688351631517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379228127534742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089043111942542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483430635916652,0.0,0.0950178210624336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088585378233716,0.0,0.0,0.09220155857165484,0.09029495262551293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376704215127843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643352865457464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675418491647032,0.18583192599492068,0.1010320607893336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07498839423390442,0.17133678611709852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784347935786398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973368411886209,0.21733667142019736,0.0930708773810825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867483237446801,0.0,0.09837752617376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092615452641112,0.06251825761800259,0.12059558822624322,0.0,0.0,0.05487257226394243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389017466266514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07764533430144639,0.16651424350834906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723499006730351,0.08491387193671808,0.0,0.10821450835447133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369701040595264,0.0,0.0,0.06059964009712247
mentalhealth,huzae,2020/03/08,"i changed my dreams everyday what is wrong with me i graduated university and i struggled finding a job

i’m currently doing teacher training however i hate it

i’m looking for jobs everyday

i get so excited on different careers - i make CVS, cover letters and start applying. i give up

i pick a different career and make CVS, Cover letters and start applying. i generally get so excited and nothing. i give up

i hate my life. it’s a pattern... i’ve been through 4 different careers paths and every time i do the same thing

i’m so frustrated. i feel alone and trapped. i don’t want to be a teacher, i want to quit but then i won’t have a job and won’t be doing anything with my life. i’m already too old. i’m 25

please advise",0.07350122850122888,2.446458905405412,3.139041769041772,84.53925061425062,95.08108108108108,6.744963144963148,28.34889434889435,7.84624498591911,2.5406783783783777,570,32,112,15,22,202,80,148,0.11599999999999999,0.797,0.087,-0.5788,8,2,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,1,4,7,3,1,6,0,11,2,0,3,0,20,30,13,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,10,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,2,20,2,9,25,1,11,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,8,65,24,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14863693429744096,0.1583709606867466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809956486914122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151818488410255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4498238817864537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091650030163575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256484984037907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311689417430548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995999264658688,0.27534287810027874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833801770541915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4272456730292231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20273597180631275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051538144665902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19159304739030625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770528664113235,0.0,0.1505935094089879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15753497016034146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15264450857369438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031595018838588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500317021814946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534413979147152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368400528079371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692962228446101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15690972561263414,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AuntJosephine,2020/03/08,"Does anyone have suggestions for resources or reading material on childhood trauma or neglect affecting people and their relationships/parenting styles/biases into adulthood? Specifically, I'm trying to figure out how my father's childhood may have affected the attitudes and opinions he has about mental health and parent-child relationships

For some context, my paternal grandmother (F80s) has had bipolar disorder for presumably her entire life, but the family isn't very open about specifics so I'm not too sure. My father (M57) and his three siblings all have good relationships with her now, but from what I can piece together, she was neglectful, borderline abusive, etc. during their childhoods. They all left home very young. She will regularly go through cycles of being verbally and sometimes physically abusive when she needs a med adjustment. There is a heavy emphasis on Christianity and family at play, and most of the family normalizes her behavior to this day. My paternal grandfather (M80s) is a Marine veteran with PTSD, but very much espouses that ""mental illness is just weakness"" mentality. It's a pretty straightforward inference that my dad and his siblings did not have very emotionally available parents in their formative years. My father is also a former Marine, and very much looks up to his dad. 

The thing is, I (F29) am trying to help my sister (F20), who still lives with my parents, to cope with her Autism Spectrum Disorder. She has been accepted to college; now I'm just trying to set up things like funding, disability and medicaid, and support groups. My mom (F58) is on board, but my dad is a constant issue. He believes things like autism is fake, my sister ""just"" has low self-esteem, medicaid and disability are traps set up by the government, etc etc. He is a loving, intelligent man, but I guess this is his blind spot.

When I talk to him about my depression and anxiety, he listens and believes me and expresses surprise about my mental status. But I'm very articulate, and can go home if I get overwhelmed. My sister is brilliant, but not good at expressing her feelings. So she's prone to meltdowns, and can't easily get away when she's feeling overstimulated (rural community and she doesn't drive).

I just ... don't understand. At all. The closest I can come up with is that he normalized so much throughout his childhood that he still applies that tactic when my sister is lashing out? Or that he refuses to see his kid being behind the curve when it comes to emotional maturity? I'm way more of a mess than my sister is, but he wouldn't know that from outward appearances, so I'm not facing the same scrutiny.

Again, he is a good man and a good father. He genuinely wants the best for my sister, he just believes that she doesn't need/shouldn't seek support, and that's just setting her up for failure. I'm very confused and just need some perspective into this, because there is no WAY he'll go to therapy (individually or family) or talk about this stuff with me. But I can't find books or websites or anything that will help me understand.

If anyone knows of resources for this kind of thing, or perhaps something I'm forgetting with my search terms or something, I'd be so grateful. I do attend a support group and have gotten some great suggestions about how to ease him into the idea of, ""yes, autism is a thing, it's not the end of the world,"" but it would make it so much easier if I could just understand what's happening in his mind.

Thanks in advance. :)",8.131487286659702,8.371547291536059,8.041415882967607,68.97484413096484,61.978056426332294,11.602995471960993,37.00121908742597,11.20814326018867,4.389033298502263,2804,123,465,72,36,904,292,638,0.098,0.7559999999999999,0.146,0.99,4,0,2,0,0,0,101.0,0,0,4,2,36,28,0,2,24,1,51,8,1,6,4,118,90,58,0,11,35,16,2,2,0,6,6,1,2,3,29,37,0,3,14,3,1,9,13,10,0,1,5,6,58,18,65,75,19,61,1,5,3,1,74,26,0,21,23,326,87,4,0.0,0.15019990951000334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05068835046845162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04848876689603368,0.0,0.0,0.08863946285524743,0.0,0.0521598253757656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059551576014712976,0.0,0.0,0.03863844183192839,0.0,0.0,0.21423698514873607,0.06651784497457354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091998134342706,0.0,0.06849584123653399,0.0,0.05060715466337831,0.0,0.0,0.04087758844342651,0.0,0.05459274941593968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528765115687448,0.0,0.05546797188662536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259746797818434,0.05613961948009386,0.0,0.21207053334616516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23901206583548654,0.0,0.06409794820644284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05793204321813231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623129423435227,0.0,0.10806816568475787,0.2126547589743664,0.0,0.06988134373452402,0.06982488173464553,0.0,0.05605047038749634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737447867395939,0.0,0.0,0.08497023434758548,0.0,0.1271591130823965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155308706149299,0.0,0.0661566744328137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600492775577438,0.06966863670843547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886715765549989,0.0,0.04477016023945789,0.061932671900051375,0.0,0.0559694414636427,0.0,0.053226794343541474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05720674749448191,0.0,0.04230946958256064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040559701969164,0.0,0.2555056062165438,0.0,0.06400000934257256,0.07423485090350644,0.0,0.0,0.1863788255839483,0.14099582311890518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12420618667120015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111420785089728,0.0,0.0,0.04394264828352887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644845548517902,0.0,0.0,0.07409277973288544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06340138847349154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610189672036455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050509029547214486,0.0,0.06612358152664433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09759256278347107,0.06268862993602882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10123746517184294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255978544442432,0.0,0.21578303894294584,0.059738892119038975,0.0,0.0,0.10189169556628462,0.0,0.0583556883831684,0.07248539762720259,0.0,0.2105483490830876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12910120637124728,0.0,0.0,0.19795567449601406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3660904286790773,0.03738566450323524,0.10062291216800556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04502634252911713,0.0,0.0,0.040817369720823185
mentalhealth,laughinghyena688,2020/03/08,Feelings of dread So I’m 21 and have panic disorder and GAD. I’m on meds and just got done with a group therapy program. I am a lot better than I once was but I still get that feeling of dread and horrible thoughts about people I’m close to dying. I think of a bunch of possibilities in my head and it gets hard to stop. Anyone have any tips for dealing with that feeling of hopelessness and just dark thoughts?,2.0992857142857133,4.200781547619052,3.395476190476192,89.42035714285717,78.76190476190476,6.5809523809523816,24.785714285714285,7.645422480735847,1.1991714285714297,326,12,69,5,8,106,57,84,0.266,0.6759999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9655,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,3,3,0,5,1,1,0,0,20,17,8,1,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,9,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,5,4,5,1,14,12,2,5,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,43,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13905051467888938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297419140448678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808421751041709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21080550899617745,0.0,0.0,0.21221353511681693,0.0,0.2343469124935199,0.0,0.0,0.2092496740396597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31016723320408673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21366026899989451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16353792814772772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317009952560068,0.0,0.20985110005022053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17383796166003038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271264509054872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21775998927490492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23990822362511294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175773192058252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23051567331976835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632945897519872,0.17095087409732554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338358284347044,0.0,0.0,0.13101979754740353,0.0,0.32466179411227913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,applesaucehums,2020/03/08,"Why do I get clinical grade depression when I'm tired? I just had a cup of coffee and feel significantly btter. But I get very dark thoughts about how much im failing and what I feel others are doing to me, I catrosphize interactions that arent even close to whats happening. Its very intense, and yes I know if the solution is as easy as caffeine there isnt much of a problem. The sadness pulls you in and you forget these easy solutions exist, plus I wanna be able to feel good without anything.",3.5975,5.3277086868686885,4.969583333333336,81.47437500000005,73.24242424242425,8.182323232323233,28.536616161616163,8.841846274778883,2.3105646464646465,396,16,77,8,8,132,71,99,0.138,0.6779999999999999,0.184,0.4243,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,1,6,5,0,0,4,1,8,2,0,1,0,19,17,11,0,3,4,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,3,10,1,12,14,2,4,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,53,16,2,0.2312644116164031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19031090575538426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991876988501461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274796276602232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508027056939929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24165221996596706,0.0,0.0,0.19397361619814746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20450635542993706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498052497179957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270968725375124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34001190432460643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212888089758904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18359811033797,0.0,0.2658044207837763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3816347191040718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20868016060563774,0.0,0.0,0.2229306401084388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,robyn_396,2020/03/08,"Anything to fill this void? This probably won't make any sense but my depression is making me feel lukewarm and lightgrey and I need help how to figure out to make the water clarity go up and get the pot back on the burner but idk what I have to do to feel better. I'm taking my meds regularly, I'm eating decently healthy, I don't understand how to get out of this. I've tried to do the stuff I love but it feels like more of a chore than anything. Anybody wanna share what they do to get out of this/avoid it?",2.8516666666666666,3.893657685185186,4.3157407407407415,88.16583333333334,74.0,7.622222222222224,24.61111111111111,8.07648339933343,1.203588888888889,402,12,89,6,8,134,67,108,0.055,0.725,0.22,0.9685,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,3,5,0,0,5,0,7,3,0,5,0,21,23,8,0,2,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,8,6,2,0,5,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,3,8,4,18,22,1,8,0,1,0,1,4,5,0,0,2,56,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938253223248884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33733577646347485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15760464591607462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812739806009312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765351722406108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209729316818284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109078343173797,0.1464263054483395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212556537397842,0.0,0.1164857509894611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373830326953306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013504557076368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849879907186877,0.0,0.4104451367667574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276687715776654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15197819115661518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22098583264292468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346347153827942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410740191276673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391570855534674,0.0,0.0,0.21337472751742834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chingadera1,2020/03/08,"I feel like a loser I graduated from my masters 7 months ago and haven’t been able to find a job. I have no friends, no love, not even a Homebase. I’m alone in life and just feel like a complete waste of a person.",2.8382269503546063,2.827573106382978,4.328510638297871,91.93333333333334,73.25531914893618,7.117730496453903,26.30496453900709,6.42735559955562,0.6834028368794325,164,5,41,1,3,55,35,47,0.243,0.52,0.237,0.1779,1,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,7,7,2,0,0,2,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,2,4,4,4,6,0,3,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,4,23,4,2,0.2717344806046553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24087622153566204,0.0,0.0,0.2814349710749029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849084329491388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179478061650452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747942362026148,0.3882543344781645,0.0,0.0,0.2483603923874648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20994138564863304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696545426819194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19193409979438167,0.26551148276928954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24525097796815115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21689586992047025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237268067176462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ash13trans,2020/03/08,"I'm worried I have adhd autism anxiety and body dysphoria  I'm on vyvvance  and zoloft but I've been having other symptoms  idk if they are side affects or what but I've been having insomnia, fatigue, mood swings, irritable, empty feeling, dizziness, headaches, fastening pulse, twitches, urges to rule my eyes and move basically any other body part, shakiness, cold sweats without fever, constantly thirsty,  the urge to bite, cut, and scratch myself,  acne, fidgety, red dots on feet are not itchy and don't hurt, eczema, asthma attacks come on faster, spacing out for minutes at a time,  

If this has any relevance I recently  stopped  cutting and started seeing a therapist",11.93344827586207,10.092848896551725,10.242482758620694,62.950793103448284,55.72413793103448,13.073103448275864,49.06206896551724,11.602472056035307,5.938091724137932,536,30,80,11,5,165,92,116,0.226,0.7140000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.9553,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,0,0,7,3,1,3,0,9,12,5,1,0,19,15,11,0,2,7,0,2,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,8,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,6,0,0,2,6,5,0,9,13,1,15,0,2,3,0,1,7,0,4,6,43,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491810187149342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28199507068397217,0.0,0.1586136610517599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358778866459107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.460613466445633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786040695994232,0.0,0.224059650117344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483675789001777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22196053884233524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22036839619371207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22452778129435996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20472211155951145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16522222785810886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675551288885194,0.0,0.0,0.17334457170434686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21550446507263368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24073639810777586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209009571464402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19986726297118715,0.0,0.0,0.21056267767814854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_sir_axlotl_,2020/03/08,"I don't think I exist It's hard to describe but I feel like I'm the only person that feels the way I do. I guess it's dissociation but idk. I don't feel real, idk if I ever have. I'm afraid it's not going to go away. I don't want to feel like this forever.",-2.5893548387096783,-0.9357651774193556,1.7066935483870969,96.63004032258064,95.93548387096772,4.390322580645162,12.588709677419354,5.985473137389443,-1.1227483870967745,197,3,53,2,8,75,35,62,0.11,0.7659999999999999,0.124,0.5813,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,0,1,13,16,3,0,2,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,5,8,2,4,16,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,3,29,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23400298721249616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252918389608452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5037351606208966,0.355861466096967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830966061705405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27437109143223176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22311162244392024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243359306344519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18942371570636896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174722977836015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28348834204983003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15958958191748734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469038732160478,0.19769470100603695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,naice_shep1,2020/03/08,"healthy coping mechanisms? I find myself trying to please everyone and help everyone ignoring my own happiness, I've been stressed lately and it's been awhile since I've done anything.. self harm related   I promised myself I wouldnt but I'm at my breaking point, everything's getting to me right now: people are upsetting me easily,I find it hard to focus or speak,things I enjoy doing are no longer fun. 

I need a better coping mechanism.",3.458970189701893,6.335558609756102,4.656016260162605,77.90917344173445,78.75609756097559,8.52249322493225,27.40379403794038,9.150863307647796,3.067768021680217,354,15,58,10,9,116,60,82,0.159,0.598,0.243,0.8248,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,1,9,0,2,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,9,10,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,1,11,5,4,6,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,32,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17688934487550212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901099018173372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21997321677907666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4107967206060581,0.19318736076940654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39292927452613374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230492206377744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288232003210295,0.19255712676882472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407955720117924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24247818500296056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15938613420073036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14902247488312145,0.0,0.0,0.23595563368519976,0.2032016044899244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835700792237492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22424455858137135,0.0,0.0,0.17781269092128704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462298020012053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459400835357426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wovenbasket69,2020/03/08,"i think (?) i almost had a panic attack last night i’ve  never had one before so i can’t be sure. i laid down in bed (stayed up late) and immediately my “ears” started a tinnitus-like low roar (like when you’re in an airplane). it built until it was so loud i couldn’t hear my inner dialogue anymore, i thought i might be having a heart attack or something else life threatening. in the back of my head i thought maybe it was the weed i had smoked an hour or two prior, so i made myself take deep breaths and focus on listening to the sounds of me and my partners breathing patterns. as soon as it quieted down a tiny bit i had the thought “oh it’s all in my head” and instantly the sound dulled to a manageable level. i still had to focus on my breathing or it started to build again, eventually i was able to fall asleep. 

anyone have a similar experience? i’m worried about anxiety or possible tinnitus. i have been smoking for 10+ years and never had that happen so i’m unsure if it’s related.",1.7838118811881216,3.9450293118811888,3.829198019801982,85.59835148514854,80.13861386138613,7.0102970297029685,24.951485148514852,8.07648339933343,1.61911603960396,779,30,158,15,20,265,122,202,0.12300000000000001,0.863,0.013999999999999999,-0.9563,0,0,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,10,7,2,1,13,0,18,9,8,1,4,22,31,18,0,2,5,0,0,1,1,1,1,7,1,1,8,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,5,0,2,14,7,22,2,21,13,2,31,0,2,0,0,3,13,0,7,17,106,30,1,0.1437144269110099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14390923904541986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109941143223238,0.0,0.14252609427723106,0.10048846882304176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269918157991477,0.0,0.11050752333240664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229039223356895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568989324765884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200549626516703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14058028615540374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12708619309322255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949849272477276,0.0,0.16197660397510893,0.17030228784753373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152976144057602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714643924151708,0.16211613331544278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150974986778176,0.0702116096926185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598606561266816,0.0,0.0,0.14438045836398575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15245829595001809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22168285149431693,0.0,0.0,0.134866254173711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738461503350253,0.0,0.0,0.16861791497697498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16201642285272674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106383870877328,0.0,0.0,0.20344362212341732,0.15318045727418395,0.1147705269746258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13544914657324605,0.0,0.10805536355597173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208640183035394,0.0,0.34227960573023475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14038811256908518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14594897659242306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254737906811883
mentalhealth,Musiclove1414,2020/03/08,Abilify for depression I take 10 mg of abilify daily for depression. It has been helping a lot. It helps with mellowing my mood. I dont take any other meds. I'm just wondering if it's normal to take abilify for depression.,1.1837121212121209,3.817603886363639,4.433636363636363,76.33712121212123,89.68181818181819,10.206060606060607,27.787878787878785,9.725611199111238,4.144087878787879,177,9,32,8,6,64,32,44,0.22699999999999998,0.675,0.098,-0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,8,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,6,7,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15403651880132166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5852856080827532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654713962190388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3036536036446639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19257314157711666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516047344806562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221934518995142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5109284642475213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456435447146901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elenaniotto,2020/03/08,When someone can’t move from bed? What does this mean?,-0.2681818181818194,1.804562636363638,-0.5722727272727255,108.96159090909092,104.45454545454544,2.2,14.590909090909092,3.1291,-1.7490363636363635,43,1,10,0,2,12,11,11,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.448925261315148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5588017950215874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5452323537653272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4346588823908916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,francarabbit,2020/03/09,"Panic attacks making me go insane I suffer from a severe panic disorder, which leads to me having multiple panic attacks per day. I am very much used to that, but I go through phases when they are much worse than usual. I'm quite stressed right now and I also have a phobia of illnesses and diseases, which makes me quite the hypochondriac, so the constant news of Corona virus make me panic even more, even though I rationally know that I shouldn't and I don't have to worry that much. But I just feel like I'm going insane. I can't sleep, can't really do anything outside of my apartment without panicking to the max. I hate staying in though, I don't want to hide away and make a habit out of avoiding situations, because I feel I would stay in forever then. I don't know what to do anymore, tbh.",4.548404802744425,5.560740672955982,5.4837507146941125,81.49193825042884,69.9433962264151,8.045969125214409,28.29102344196684,8.296473431620573,1.9431836477987423,633,22,121,9,11,208,95,159,0.293,0.643,0.065,-0.9889,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,3,9,11,3,6,6,0,14,2,1,6,0,24,30,12,0,3,4,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,4,0,0,4,7,10,0,0,0,2,20,1,18,28,4,18,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,7,84,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959500976637752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110943470511897,0.0,0.0,0.09219593892413007,0.0,0.0,0.25491385272912664,0.1052613467459788,0.0,0.0,0.06829599979671587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107092670855606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225383943188783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284027631993669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14799721319242434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329736009332865,0.08003841665138553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910176257557776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106121835628546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314392022260573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054735045552493984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29913913594952063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24707766988047414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5257996104995485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383277839365085,0.0,0.0,0.0717730191303754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567798345526243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656859392067107,0.0,0.0,0.1259329628104156,0.11211673717342477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388305678607959,0.0,0.0,0.12833666042791556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22014926088689105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967629821944338,0.1233916343006091,0.09244128998858253,0.0660816330642806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10799853848718996,0.0,0.0,0.11377781989473465,0.11417407842656135,0.07958703649572009,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NiomiSmyth,2020/03/09,"what does your mental health problem feel like? I'm doing an art piece on multiple mental health issues that people suffer, I want to hear about anyone. I really want to do this art piece justice although I understand we all experience things in different ways I want to gain some understanding about this topic, how it feels daily to experience mental health problems and what you would describe it as in a picture. Any information will help don't hold back :)",6.653293172690763,8.484265192771089,6.723072289156628,71.50019076305223,65.74698795180723,9.388755020080325,29.49598393574297,9.725611199111238,3.0099815261044167,373,13,59,8,6,119,61,83,0.122,0.708,0.17,0.3653,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,2,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,0,5,3,0,1,1,17,14,4,0,6,0,0,2,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,8,2,0,1,5,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,7,1,10,12,4,5,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,1,2,40,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169863727254767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456833233993207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499416362125152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15624716552153614,0.0,0.0,0.13087158093308052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925757801928072,0.0,0.0,0.15123321677399526,0.10683803405229646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4768916676794489,0.16855290516556262,0.0,0.10023972864964432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560905920626439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306222318292349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4521314934387435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367863932372123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28619692386326245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580509688598933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935389512230534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113721449790905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646241164778497,0.11870525589464245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623551628071733,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway6409638610,2020/03/09,"Hello, So weird stuff has been happening to me but i dont know what to make of it. Hello i am 16(male) and i feel like i'm going through Hallucinations or some shit. I will try as best as i can to explain. Also i smoke weed on occasion and have done acid twice.

Background- I have had depression for 4 years. Some was bullying but not even half, My mind would be scattered(i have ADHD and  Dyslexia). My mind deeply thought about how meaningless life is. But now im fine after 4 years of struggle but now have a new problem.

1st sign Noises- First off i started to hear like distant voices,footsteps, knocking, and esc... But not close but far, also not just in one place everywhere like school,my house, and many normal places that these sounds would not be. Like just last night i was in my room and i hear voices in the distant saying rubbish words that have no meaning.

2nd sign My mind- i will believe anything in my mind. Example i was home alone and then my mind said theres a homeless guy in your house protect yourself, i get knifes and lock myself in my room. I hear his footsteps so i run out and nothing. I hear foosteps around me so i turn around and see nothing but still hear footsteps right next to me. 

3rd sign Hallucinations- I will see weird things in my wall including falling smiles, tv static in my walls, and sometimes my whole room will do a 360 with me inside and i can feel it. all sober. While sitting on my chair i will see objects move a couple feet and then stop.

I dont understand this at all, can anybody help me,",2.3697923497267723,4.654150137704921,2.9605737704918056,91.94468579234974,78.77049180327869,5.5092896174863375,24.26502732240437,6.588339656340683,0.6816863387978138,1212,43,249,11,30,377,175,305,0.132,0.778,0.09,-0.9091,0,1,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,0,2,16,12,1,1,5,0,29,3,2,2,2,59,52,32,0,4,14,0,2,4,0,7,1,9,4,1,9,18,0,2,7,1,0,4,7,6,0,4,8,15,40,6,29,35,6,46,0,1,3,0,14,25,1,3,20,164,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288424154389578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866412314982905,0.0,0.1369214554530118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07044813197333982,0.15241863130525252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964509581502606,0.08984036828329076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472368051550534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07373408917562234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760675900043237,0.2006639971877522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05654331052068516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657200598232459,0.06115840898191895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728181647361076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044726673482639735,0.0,0.04865302841430272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476543010432369,0.07570291707419581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4824324783138642,0.0,0.0573812722722948,0.0,0.08587185554692844,0.0,0.0,0.19756039457656047,0.0,0.0,0.0924713858615461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047047946171987085,0.06978198779573665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06046749839163179,0.16729507861824716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057144039026232836,0.08679312734283105,0.0,0.09325226476845873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4321986387012858,0.0,0.0,0.09098781046630326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268078944079328,0.09104513380125344,0.08033735693326345,0.08387771400192844,0.16428646824347312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580102311411269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17888438580878765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191534351160358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310880808910805,0.08143286086994095,0.06807895848039927,0.0,0.0866399183508579,0.20465559961636998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878754344787866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466855176653089,0.0,0.060593819360005824,0.0,0.06836670038379805,0.07157216419423969,0.0,0.0894961227603006,0.09800073723638301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056874185356708414,0.0,0.0,0.06796323025108185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058122247399142825,0.0931169768861132,0.0,0.08912100057404257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557833208029144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162700691255865,0.0,0.0,0.11025755658427376
mentalhealth,videoreviewer,2020/03/09,"OCD survey - helping the world (google form, no need to sign in, anonymous) [https://forms.gle/4DnwqnY3XuUbrteC9](https://forms.gle/4DnwqnY3XuUbrteC9)

(google form, no need to sign in, anonymous)",18.75272727272727,24.80652790909092,10.154545454545453,41.8518181818182,42.63636363636363,6.218181818181819,29.181818181818183,7.1686216300943375,1.6751090909090918,162,4,17,1,2,40,14,22,0.172,0.742,0.086,-0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,9,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4118666091229769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9112441474651791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Noahkng,2020/03/09,"Four-Panel Window It's like I can see the rest of my life split into different sections of a four-panel window. 

I'm afraid if I wait too long, the soot and grime of procrastination will leave the glass blurry, a reminder of my failed hopes and dreams.

One panel, a stained violet. It brings forth a cleansing order, a laid out path for my eyes to wander about. This light will grow stale, it was never my brightness to begin with. For many nights I wondered if it could work. Perplexed by the thought, I let it dwell. It seems as though I am too far on this path to turn. Everything is this shade now, it's been years since my lenses have tasted another flavour. Long have I missed the days where I could loiter by that window, wondering which way the sun will take me.

Give me the blue light I wish I had pursued. Give me the wife, the kid and the dog. Give me the job I never knew I wanted. Give me meaning. Give me purpose. Give me something that I can look back on. Give me the feeling of an ocean, swallowed by the countless joyous memories of which I will never indulge. I'm left alone with these desires yet no substance remains within me. Hopes vast as the ocean, with effort shallow as the plastic swimming pool in the middle of our backyard.

Take the red light. Take the boredom. Take the unwillingness. Take my sociopathy. Take what they wanted me to be. Take I've lost all semblance of what this ""me"" was. A collective of dead dreams were unloaded on my brain since my arrival. Sending out messages to have these thoughts cleared out. Reveal a path to my subconscious. Reveal the green.

Bring back the green. Bring back creation. Bring back life. Bring back worth. Bring back the things that made everything glow. I once looked out the four panel window and saw my friends, walking home from school with a soccer ball and some spare smiles. Snowbanks now fill the curbsides. Grimey, and filled with the same soot that's building on my window. As the snow begins to melt, I spot a fleeting green. The colour so bright it speaks.

""There's a way out. It's a long road filled with shattered glass and red coals. You'll be different by the end, but if you take my hand we can make it out together.""

The voice fades.

The sun goes down.

I guess I'll try again tomorrow.",2.3500924866514095,4.9531198993135055,2.4068492562929045,94.02218845347065,81.12814645308924,5.10619755911518,21.461146071700988,6.42735559955562,0.2795278794813125,1784,54,358,16,48,535,223,437,0.052000000000000005,0.8740000000000001,0.07400000000000001,0.8393,4,1,1,0,0,0,66.0,2,2,1,4,17,11,0,2,42,0,23,7,3,2,5,54,72,17,1,11,4,1,2,1,1,5,2,2,7,1,25,21,2,1,10,6,1,13,4,5,0,2,11,24,44,6,48,51,5,61,0,3,15,0,18,21,0,10,25,219,69,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07815211985483113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912468593955821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3481369974714553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423650252488966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204947452994803,0.0,0.0,0.048664409614714035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767588358440987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683372336835586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563424444340966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0381540218706648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058298953648281776,0.0,0.0,0.506705846649931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312590775105233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569090302195401,0.1498943858472555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488079416210236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989952421497314,0.08198574565587588,0.07716130130365975,0.10659696422281097,0.03686515066867229,0.0,0.0,0.2003348630663383,0.1267320613101766,0.0,0.08237173052922271,0.0,0.0,0.0714005393067923,0.05036905152065338,0.07650294899110646,0.0,0.0821962921869045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17459445289981884,0.0,0.0,0.07081257361851956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036070710167766,0.051132548046368936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636790443105043,0.060130555561738575,0.06869447094205024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248398957856542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05809154394243946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4538824590962596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05013119165609125,0.0,0.07413747070337721,0.11981104256404693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05123128367596917,0.08207704401277993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901460973519258,0.11979069218200565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867734077209078,0.0,0.16366277855613687,0.05493459599313131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0485927197549441
mentalhealth,sftkitti,2020/03/09,"how to get out of a depression episode yknowwhen everything feels empty and youre not depressed depressed but you're tired all the time, not eating properly, not sleeping properly, showered once a week, no motivation, giving up basic hyegine, room that is usually clean and spotless us a mess",9.05,9.898072431372553,7.930196078431373,68.4858823529412,59.98039215686275,11.505882352941176,44.450980392156865,11.20814326018867,5.4960274509803915,238,14,36,6,3,73,43,51,0.21600000000000005,0.5710000000000001,0.213,-0.0511,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,1,0,1,1,4,0,0,4,0,1,3,1,2,1,11,4,4,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,4,1,6,0,3,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,21,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.625215431184545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475918416753493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21746362915851028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12234538699332267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12641735891564726,0.23211603862706964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25768611872005776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421409569757311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410924439828825,0.278104565878358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910555603672925,0.0,0.26649159764730473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940906999862448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ls3347,2020/03/09,"I'm not sure how to get my life together I'm a 19-year-old college freshman, female. I consider myself to be a pretty smart kid, my first semester I had straight A's at the cost of my mental health deteriorating. After my first semester ended, I tried taking a break for my winter break but my anxiety kept rushing through me and I felt like I was being lazy. I decided to not go home for most of the break so that I can work and earn some extra cash. My boyfriend left about a week in to go home and I was so scared to be alone that I paid for my mom's plane ticket to keep me company but it proved to be a terrible idea because she ended up taking most of my money and making me pay for a hotel because she didn't like my dorm since she couldn't smoke there. Overall, the break was really stressful and I ended up coming home for about a week and it was actually quite nice to see my friends from high school even if I only have 2 of them. 

I suffer from PTSD from childhood neglect and physical abuse that continued from when I was a baby to when I was about 13 and ran away from home. I have a really difficult time making friends because, as my therapist described it, it became a coping mechanism for me to stay safe as a kid. Now I don't know how to make friends and whenever I try, new people annoy the shit out of me. I thought I had formed a bond with my two roommates, but they became closer to each other than me and never invite me to anything unless they need a ride or drugs. They also almost never clean our dorm so I basically moved out because I got sick of being the only one that cleans. (I came back today to get something and the sink was clogged halfway up with water with dirty dishes growing mold on them to the side) I have formed an unhealthy dependency on my boyfriend. Every time he's away from me I get extremely depressed and unmotivated. But when I am with him I'm so comfortable that I can't get anything done. My grades have fallen a lot since last semester and I can't focus on anything. I also have pretty bad ADHD so doing any school work takes twice the effort for me and I feel like I burned myself out last semester. I don't want to do anything and whenever I try to, my brain just won't absorb it and I'll zone off for like 20 min without noticing. I'm a pre-med student and I can't afford this. It's stressing me out even more because becoming a psychiatrist is all I've been passionate about since I was a child. It has been the light at the end of the tunnel for me and now I'm barely getting through acting class for my humanities. I don't know what to do. I feel so useless.",4.098833333333332,4.733473661111109,5.403333333333332,83.04000000000002,70.72222222222223,8.222222222222221,27.592592592592588,8.344100000000001,1.7555370370370367,2067,68,427,30,36,693,255,540,0.157,0.737,0.106,-0.9833,1,1,3,0,1,0,36.0,1,0,5,7,24,25,2,3,30,0,39,9,2,6,5,71,73,40,0,4,11,1,3,4,3,1,4,0,8,4,15,29,2,4,9,2,5,11,14,12,0,5,21,5,76,13,73,45,10,64,0,4,1,1,19,21,1,8,31,296,91,12,0.0,0.08982221027018618,0.07397942398230459,0.0,0.09110864121450084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591255874064726,0.07851608432385215,0.0,0.1212501309455962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05155326005909778,0.0,0.057994285483740735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24954000666671136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424515953482189,0.05829305270391366,0.06329801203957952,0.2310647361947104,0.08372596222904992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462880274618384,0.0,0.08670620923502304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530342551973976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652948651335843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757974062850251,0.0,0.0,0.08791529389387816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26857990643960505,0.0,0.0,0.10014330890724953,0.0,0.06387302172708886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666342011082458,0.054158532517402366,0.07278929152403077,0.0,0.0,0.1289675453749616,0.0,0.0,0.17571137811015672,0.0,0.19803744411671406,0.0,0.08616890678843943,0.0,0.06063201821866996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058226679415552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009721040065265,0.3041736211511289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855800306735913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738322882407187,0.0,0.0,0.08332616119513085,0.12359020184065607,0.0,0.0,0.08236756381308469,0.0,0.053546699994392384,0.14814734565816426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445077651311715,0.0,0.0,0.1518108800063573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639844245467173,0.0,0.0,0.08878751537179308,0.0,0.08057381435941849,0.0,0.05621200222521135,0.11693837447465895,0.07321757217094302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630995378759099,0.07954962701073745,0.0,0.05137067889597298,0.11531353005616142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052556966336775215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542516307492474,0.0,0.0,0.08861759321135396,0.0,0.0,0.0806330483294387,0.0,0.0,0.09713139147605288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589882967105795,0.15344711915894566,0.06041059128908185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781766489555428,0.18813193684370827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05836208373054624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080315439007799,0.0,0.0,0.17367972750469876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144983438045173,0.0,0.17099859302144854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802101474496488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0601845089957968,0.08841060193068864,0.0,0.07185882121701498,0.0,0.0,0.15440962305027975,0.0,0.07405515387740813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044714581108007696,0.0,0.12162008914534385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307793686082567,0.0,0.11038086693759253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048819022297687
mentalhealth,Lamaritana,2020/03/09,"My bipolar disorder is getting so stable I'm scared the next psychiatrist I'm gonna see will say I'm not sick I'm bipolar since I am 10. I firstly got diagnosed by my psychiatrist mom, she's type II, it runs on her side of the family so it wasn't such a surprise. Since then, doctors only told or I wasn't sick and just a brat teen, or that yes indeed it's bipolar. No doctor ever listened to me before giving me a wanted diagnosis. I always knew.

It's a luck. I've never been in that medical wandering. But I grew up with it and I got so good at hiding and faking now when I tell someone they always answer they couldn't tell. I went from crying in foetal position to be able to keep a conversation and faking smile while having a heavy panick attack. That guy I'm seeing told me being surprised because I look so normal and he had no idea bipolar disorder can even get really stabilised. Well I could tell he has autism within two days haha.

But I'm stable just because I'm on heavy medication. I'm taking lithium, lamotrigine and pregabaline. I stopped saying that I don't take that much meds when a friend came with me to the pharmacy and they gave me seven boxes. I was like yeah, no, it's just that I am trying Xanax for a couple weeks because of the extra stress. Still, a lot of boxes. 

It wrecked a good chunk of my life. I got my high school diploma at 21, failed two first year at uni. But still. I'm getting back in September.

I'm giving my notice tomorrow and will soon have to find a new psychiatrist. I love the one I see now. I don't want to leave her. She's the first ever who stan my mom for giving me lamotrigine at 10 because no one would have done it, even if it wasn't really ethical. 

What if the next person I see find me too stable, too normal to agree to give me my meds? What if people stop taking me seriously? What if stop believing that I'm mentally ill too? Only proof that will remain is the shoes box full of medication and the kinder surprise plastic eggs I use to put meds doses in my bag.",1.8864416159380184,3.8657164340527608,4.030359712230219,85.21108467072496,78.90407673860912,6.770927873086146,21.72348275225973,7.793537801064563,1.0014109204943735,1591,46,325,26,39,546,207,417,0.132,0.722,0.146,0.8822,0,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,3,4,24,18,1,2,20,3,26,19,1,1,4,48,68,26,0,11,13,2,0,1,1,5,16,3,0,2,21,12,1,4,5,0,0,5,12,7,1,8,16,8,44,11,32,43,4,46,0,1,5,1,30,15,0,8,27,205,65,5,0.07445700455477015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390838483168633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470559164323016,0.0,0.057252840546010784,0.0,0.18155319556662888,0.0,0.06335742685859684,0.08388754700026213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515897763831708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05944785951538203,0.08238525934499281,0.08178752327182998,0.04801860826352573,0.0,0.0,0.07557229231545863,0.0,0.0,0.1706683557442495,0.1524197983504651,0.0,0.07619536657935784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09835629857538282,0.13470124672749498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019143739052851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610470652137893,0.18999927011372728,0.0,0.0,0.05752529702042985,0.0,0.11670213534100125,0.2857037734588152,0.0,0.1249020056637743,0.17865020495778255,0.0,0.0,0.07372414062280289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866791328533328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405289520459236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06618080674098813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883921708074806,0.0,0.0,0.0525911842722589,0.036375931456889415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06252513135022705,0.0,0.0,0.06330068266478582,0.06720035360622406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24811484079060603,0.2250227964442988,0.07503514811683965,0.0,0.0,0.1744062876884287,0.0,0.0,0.05473446548050211,0.0,0.05742583204136997,0.0719110389699595,0.15837173808059607,0.0,0.14590411148947835,0.0,0.08476979318330924,0.0,0.0,0.10090798649747172,0.11325581425005365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051619111947098784,0.0650129844366784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484985474019533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539812739670178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842239701457973,0.07454445068878973,0.07535446367918562,0.2373303705971003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318320717032152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308717833714438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892292003494633,0.18674816931526367,0.08529024715353026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16794720340991676,0.0,0.1952361114185689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229371727382906,0.0,0.05055141860654791,0.0,0.14546734884820625,0.0,0.0,0.06430694580299941,0.0,0.0,0.0878333408017438,0.0,0.059724917876556004,0.0,0.06694578902151008,0.06902238917508001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05289211975988496,0.0,0.0,0.04794786976448682
mentalhealth,Rising-Ark,2020/03/09,"Explanation? Before I say what I’m trying to say, I don’t know how to put it into words but I’ll try my best. Everything in my life is pretty much fine, no extreme situations, but the past two months, I’ve Felt like everything just sucks. I’ve just felt like everyone is against me including my family. I’ve lost all motivation. I never want to get out of bed anymore and just feel *sad* . Idk why, I have nothing to be sad over, I just want to be alone all the time now. Why do I feel this way?",0.5521765734265713,2.6103801442307706,2.9607342657342675,90.67517482517485,84.09615384615384,6.858741258741258,20.031468531468533,8.00094639256281,0.7991653846153843,381,11,88,8,11,131,69,104,0.132,0.654,0.214,0.9303,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,6,8,1,0,2,0,7,1,0,2,3,22,18,4,0,2,6,0,4,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,3,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,3,6,10,4,11,13,4,11,0,3,0,0,2,4,1,0,7,49,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17580901863449636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834563279856712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14444410036032246,0.0,0.1781413543667074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622026729748373,0.3051193422919438,0.0,0.1600244758913703,0.0,0.17166063197007528,0.0,0.3259717806903559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886869716004585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328974281162343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989890807978143,0.16586180830183767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18530134735267345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549222362435007,0.0,0.1247852227755284,0.0,0.1309210783634146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16287897365208448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204485681811912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726960027256323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064487095061567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699828172861301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19080525763435555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09898214675485036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23049718224376106,0.0,0.16582034165525206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002449992494923,0.13473904529515818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063445720435388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NuggetNoobie,2020/03/09,"Apologies for this type of post. Was wondering if I could grab some thoughts, perspectives and opinions on the matter. I have a very good friend and I’m concerned for their mental well-being so to speak. Though I try to keep an open mind and I try to stay positive – it’s getting a little harder and harder to connect with some of the things that are shared with me.

Its important to know they are struggling with these beliefs and trying to make sense of the information that is seemingly pouring in from somewhere else rather than creating it if that makes any sense at all. They seem groomed in a sense though from what I know of their lives its unlikely. 

They mention that they see crystalized things all the time (and by all the time I mean daily) – they see things moving along the walls all the time, they’re saying that sometimes they “blip” out…. They blip out into another dimension – and that’s why they forget things when they “blip” back. 

While driving they have said they see people walking they know aren't from this planet, often having grotesque faces too scary to try to look at. While walking through a crowd they can tell who isn't from this planet as well as knowing what species they are. They’re able to communicate with other dimensions – though they can’t control when to open or close a channel – they’re still able to see the people who have past and sometimes even communicate with them.

They believe they’re not from earth and that they’re just passing by to another place but have to go through their human life on earth. They have a job to do on earth and when it’s time to leave they leave to another place.  They’ve struggled for years with physical health issues –  relying on Eastern health and often taking some very scammy fix all products, some even claiming to autism. A fool and their money, I know. 

 For some scope this is a high functioning intelligent person who has only recently decided to open up about these things and knows full well that if she tells people they won't understand, and that's acceptable. Their focus is deffinitly changing from their organized religious beliefs to Aliens and visions and numerology and they're struggling in general though understandable given their beliefs of what is real. I'm sure there is more than I know as well, this is me trying to write it in a very generalized way to paint a picture.

I've read the faq, I'm pretty sure i know where this will go, I just want some of that sweet confirmation bias I guess. I want them to be better, but they feel that this path is the ""I'll get better once I understand more"" path so I feel like it will be hard for me to push for therapy when they feel they're on the path to better mental health.",7.01406976744186,7.251865910852718,6.1652868217054255,81.49560465116282,64.31007751937986,9.438139534883721,30.76589147286821,9.120678840339163,2.367894263565892,2174,70,415,33,30,658,234,516,0.042,0.841,0.11699999999999999,0.9890000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,30,4,27,18,0,3,22,0,29,5,1,3,7,96,69,38,0,7,10,0,5,1,1,3,4,3,0,2,39,30,0,2,25,2,1,8,5,4,3,0,4,14,48,14,73,59,14,51,3,0,5,0,48,25,0,17,16,276,87,3,0.13446371687398834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045719969215818286,0.21149539687474334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051697149163095014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574728151197149,0.0,0.17838334574549208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112239160004442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540624607804851,0.0536791682558283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056163590720462064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881201683775261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198334315118728,0.048030453100949146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05194316705258599,0.0,0.07025174228140914,0.0,0.07641882901705895,0.056390893063032375,0.0,0.0,0.07406347185509084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06022653947673778,0.0,0.0,0.2143929648452648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103414972385451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701725928230243,0.06671724545277535,0.059758764896097674,0.0,0.0,0.2955909690558078,0.0,0.0,0.14237766114153258,0.0,0.0,0.04748784989631792,0.03284609001997128,0.06738398459681996,0.05936696274461223,0.0,0.05645782831084384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975557514126051,0.0,0.0,0.07323520353256603,0.0,0.0,0.13550780040524896,0.0,0.06788501137291958,0.0,0.0,0.07145682557981263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159973502490813,0.0,0.051132857924904865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418041632146279,0.1398303160793095,0.05870426553351371,0.1404859649900507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438953578043427,0.06839897031982951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725005233270892,0.07652457382828863,0.0,0.0,0.06638334929469512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395289331424811,0.05346547231830365,0.0,0.0,0.21430034654491567,0.1224107177380565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298805421671214,0.0,0.0,0.07166021561042732,0.053691448994715535,0.0,0.0,0.21085600811948385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267304618410096,0.0,0.0505499904366002,0.0,0.11752721527609462,0.0,0.07688548943726531,0.0,0.2233292966497606,0.0,0.2642198382382268,0.053374585727510734,0.1568137492755794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282300933181258,0.0,0.0,0.20997220707523892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16641997290101285,0.07931018404705326,0.053365519841866084,0.0,0.0,0.2417980598258537,0.0,0.06066629499275854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729100825558501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0432951125503596
mentalhealth,throwawayacc_13,2020/03/09,"Something that has been happening for the past few months I'm not sure if i put this on the right subreddit,it's my first time using reddit.

For the past few months I've been really jumpy and scared. Example, a few minutes ago i was going to get some water when i saw my mother,pretty normal, but a few seconds passed and i just jumped from fear(?),shaking mid air and hitting my head against the door frame. It felt like a shock wave went through my body just because i saw my mother. I have no idea why this is happening, it doesn't seem normal to me since it just recently started and I'm not scared easily,example i play games with disturbing imagery and such. There was another moment that i remember when i was lying on my bed and my dad wanted to tell me something and i just jumped into a sitting position and stared at him like a traumatized kitten. Note: this happens seconds after i see the said person. 

Oh another thing, I'm experiencing a lot of déjà vus lately, and they hurt. Can i call them déjà vu? I dont know. I keep experiencing situations where im just sitting there shaking and thinking ""this already happened, why am i reliving this again?"" in completely random situations. I have no memories of the things happening,i just have this weird gut feeling where i think im reliving the moment. Sometimes my head starts to hurt,sometimes i get annoyed by everything, or i just catch myself thinking why. It just hurts my brain thinking about it.

Any answers about why or how this happens would be appreciated. Thanks.",3.896594906799685,6.156698372013657,4.753122866894199,81.05679902861644,73.81228668941979,7.920661590968759,28.334077185613022,8.730908602173464,2.384778524547126,1225,50,223,25,26,396,166,293,0.16899999999999998,0.7759999999999999,0.055,-0.9862,0,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,2,1,19,14,1,4,13,0,16,6,5,2,1,48,47,17,0,5,14,2,2,2,0,1,0,1,2,1,16,12,1,1,11,2,0,8,6,9,0,3,10,9,34,5,21,34,6,37,0,2,4,0,10,10,0,7,19,144,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897526579604243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983159635601998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06058606257462356,0.1868428401429565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05431005740406558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896185856406013,0.0,0.09945687106728243,0.0909735650001546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341195688077043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441593167815323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007073630538372,0.0,0.0,0.10025400951177964,0.04504792483244131,0.0,0.08554292329877967,0.0,0.0,0.07578216940331138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309447330872624,0.0,0.05063341069688563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3939217162937386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18286954073283265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861265992227832,0.1005747665149529,0.1924707180883901,0.0,0.0,0.07918964801324814,0.0,0.0,0.04896299487640703,0.0,0.1005003988555692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870523449343526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574339186950597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422258192845071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17458377740478104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17009804625906025,0.0,0.07779227252367085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063926260044926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956272887268706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057075038078895315,0.0,0.08796825158163019,0.0,0.1009246139669384,0.07608464315958972,0.08474751979545732,0.0,0.17839458604635478,0.0,0.07099531358084157,0.08110660978000545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369836737664963,0.2002877609129492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13717576164265471,0.17622983376076942,0.0,0.12612048381539764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396877582054305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787091003196861,0.08202454953358722,0.0,0.0,0.11837840640441814,0.22834791143499866,0.0,0.0,0.05195064535872708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694745128866215,0.0,0.0,0.052549158014494064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258978657059514,0.3215690655653523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328886806793432,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SweetLoutsTeaUWU,2020/03/09,"Life with Schizophrenia Hello I  have schizophrenia and  lots of otger things  like  anxiety, depression, did, ptsd Its really hard to live with  all of this. For half this month I have been dissociating alot, I used to so therapy  but she mentally  abused me so Im gonna  wait til I move to uk with my fiance' soon ! Does anyone  know  how  I can live and cope ? Dissociate less ? And any travel advice is good to I used to go to uk before I got sick any advice and general talk is welcome !",1.1204385964912262,3.671793526315789,3.023815789473684,87.48379385964914,87.42105263157896,6.535087719298246,18.44298245614036,7.793537801064563,0.8274035087719294,375,10,76,8,12,125,67,95,0.145,0.7609999999999999,0.094,-0.6475,0,0,0,0,1,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,3,1,17,14,9,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,1,0,1,3,1,10,3,13,10,4,6,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,48,14,0,0.0,0.22065152658816728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.363962659686798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532849169135267,0.0,0.14246507168867578,0.0,0.0,0.13021600917584372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15846760353415365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16039921113894018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629707063534323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583852685271516,0.15620048426463154,0.14894475809299595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16682506909996989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20115983679934504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234687287883423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153941616423326,0.09098233577511107,0.0,0.3288881529031103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832567674113882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187675552693195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864662469220738,0.1979325056459717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21769234096819706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930339803683135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14968423247858315,0.0,0.0,0.2129696841225775,0.0,0.12372261687070465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3216850209130385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Stupid_Dumbass_69,2020/03/09,"Feeling like I'm not quite in control of my body Heyo!

 I want to say, I am not looking for a diagnosis, but rather curious if somebody else feels this way and if they treated this condition n any way, shape or form.

 For the purpose of this post let's assume that my name is Ian.

Now this is a weird one, but bear with me. Quite oftenly it feels like I have several layers or masks. There is a me, and then there is, well, Ian.

So when my actual self doesn't know what to do (what it wants), it just does what Ian would do. These kinds of decisions do not feel natural, nor do they make me feel fulfilled.

What do you say?",2.3995348837209285,3.6018027906976755,3.619294573643412,92.09033720930228,75.35658914728683,7.640620155038763,23.752713178294567,8.238735603445708,1.0504071317829449,476,14,112,8,10,155,84,129,0.036000000000000004,0.835,0.129,0.8828,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,2,3,9,6,0,0,4,0,14,1,1,2,0,29,25,12,0,6,11,0,5,2,0,1,0,2,0,1,13,3,0,1,8,0,0,0,5,1,1,1,0,8,12,5,9,23,1,8,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,6,5,76,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.16647567658769394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601014696589808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18949209221006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191336298770614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492884442199346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425098600319943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312886626262754,0.24374556757802746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17764797666749946,0.09375430569540996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17444449006486165,0.0,0.16668776448579184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325646040571616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387318978709833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559928512043904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338242647743742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36289661512320864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713272737332288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779673255863712,0.1927232887247076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124217634004368,0.2708200336068677,0.0,0.0,0.15338499203735873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118547688790808,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chosenhell,2020/03/09,"I live in Italy and we're now red zone, I just can't... I have BPD and bipolar type 2. I've been diagnosed just recently with bipolar type 2 and I was about to get on meds... but now I can't...

I'm currently in an hypomanic episode which is not great right now, I have too much energy and I can't calm down! And what if I crash hard in an untreated depressive episode?!

I also have BPD, I was seeing a therapist for it for about a year. I've recently confronted him on how unethical and manipulative he has been with me and now I'm alone...

We're locked in our house until April 3rd.

This is bad. This is really bad.",0.7071538461538474,2.6340797153846154,3.2869230769230766,89.30807692307694,82.61538461538461,8.0,21.538461538461537,8.841846274778883,1.4113076923076924,473,15,112,13,13,165,76,130,0.242,0.738,0.02,-0.9842,1,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,0,0,11,6,1,0,4,0,14,3,0,2,0,16,18,12,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,9,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,3,13,2,15,14,1,18,0,1,2,0,3,8,0,1,10,71,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20221968645038899,0.0,0.15614102303391658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260504967308518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49182003596455204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816818194438005,0.19817421937612176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200984982780803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21526335737606156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17490527773846806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252918070298664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17240896119137486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21687827369348855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14353091109489874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250818841637678,0.0,0.38557082131816667,0.0,0.0,0.16674207924617138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555886406455653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266998177004681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257343315941926
mentalhealth,FlagWafer,2020/03/09,"Is this just anxiety or depression? Over the past month or so I've been experiencing weird issues with my mental health. 

Sometimes it feels as though I'm not really fully present. It's like I'm there but there's just some layer in between me and reality.

I often don't feel like other people including myself are any more significant than any other inanimate object. This doesn't change my behaviour but it just makes everything seem surreal.

I frequently feel like I'm going insane and it's like I  don't trust myself.

I often find myself feeling like everything meaningful to me is somehow stupid or like I'm just living a delusion.

In the morning I can find it incredibly hard to focus on a task and I'm usually very anxious about things.

Sometimes I feel like I can't stop thinking and it gets overwhelming.

I find I'm frequently very emotionally sensitive, to the point that some emotions can be overwhelming.

I occasionally feel as though some colours stand out or are more vibrant than usual. I also sometimes become very sensitive to sounds, especially unpleasant ones.

I'm currently living in some stressful circumstances which I think are likely to be the cause, but I'm worried that something more serious might have come out of it.",5.4313812916570905,7.754352082969433,6.166421512296027,72.31948287749945,69.65502183406113,9.711882325902092,31.266605378074,10.064110947511567,3.656357205240174,1013,44,164,28,19,331,126,229,0.142,0.7040000000000001,0.154,0.613,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,14,16,1,3,6,0,16,1,0,2,0,44,37,17,0,0,12,0,7,8,0,1,1,1,0,0,15,8,0,1,13,0,0,2,5,7,0,1,1,10,18,9,20,33,7,20,0,3,1,0,0,8,0,13,17,108,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957652609404192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13533772911689293,0.0,0.07612336145307606,0.11241573658038902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989878800309448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222214529621193,0.10526628881873927,0.08571734651954427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570611014747669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223866253816504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17886278064267352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018854628855526,0.2843541919485321,0.0,0.0,0.27284557731059816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051988832396138315,0.0,0.05655269982860471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913963881815698,0.0,0.0,0.10577236999668684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386051786345793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3889167302530863,0.0,0.1757348060427648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642237474974114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028067767227684,0.1055622820435636,0.0,0.0,0.07942635065633485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742920832750683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499166280845102,0.06898633049722043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406724090377534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374738441983888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09058836238512666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660613382710993,0.2952479228343996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08319315877509813,0.11398609848912272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610870560996407,0.1275214400347179,0.1955322450349685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21918804701986247,0.2463136086750187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105522257752217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sillylion17,2020/03/09,Anyone try ECT? It was recommended for me. I’m nervous and don’t know much about it. I’ll be having a consultation later this week. How many sessions did you do for it to work or not work? Thanks!,-0.4369918699186961,1.8112331463414648,2.040853658536588,92.60160569105692,95.58536585365854,4.684552845528454,16.589430894308947,6.42735559955562,-0.2349056910569103,153,4,34,2,6,52,35,41,0.126,0.83,0.044000000000000004,-0.52,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,2,2,2,0,1,1,0,6,0,0,1,0,5,9,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,4,6,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,22,6,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757204274216746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21671009359008125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39978252569587897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898734254305884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36304045230438187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26772003240034564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163028336250969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.574144966274956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway653900,2020/03/09,"Who do I need to see? I have finally decided to see a professional about my mental health issues. I am trying to make an appointment, but I don't know what kind of professional to look for. I'm sure this question has been asked many times, and I'm trying to use google, but I was hoping someone would be able to actually advise me.

I have been to a few sessions of talk therapy last year - it was set up through the company I worked for  in a very rural area, so the therapist I met was the only option. I would like to continue to address childhood sexual abuse, along with potential symptoms of anxiety / depression. For example, taking over two hours to drive home 15 minutes from work because I couldn't make a left turn. 

My sister has been diagnosed with anxiety and is medicated if that matters. I know I'd have to see a psychiatrist if I wanted to try to get on medication, but I don't know that I do, as well as I'm not sure if that's something you need a referral for.

​

TL;DR: What professional do I book an appointment with? Issues: Anxiety; CSA.",5.516069193963928,5.962642645933016,6.996746411483255,73.53414795730588,67.51674641148325,11.02407066617593,32.82333456017666,10.891193690592663,3.703731394920869,839,35,160,24,13,289,124,209,0.086,0.8320000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.4039,0,0,1,0,1,0,29.0,0,1,0,2,3,7,0,0,11,0,22,5,0,3,2,32,44,11,0,10,7,1,0,1,0,2,5,0,2,0,8,6,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,1,1,1,7,4,19,6,33,33,1,15,0,1,4,0,8,6,0,6,8,106,27,8,0.11665171389465474,0.13821320593574946,0.113835245549154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12639208326828716,0.14174460054835994,0.0,0.0,0.2677147255188877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905360566763356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07110980206811811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047195024603536,0.11839903410378752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778625068086552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06094570588801908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399531698995493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11701118023572453,0.11586147276911997,0.11487844048787015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435081644785634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147480917191272,0.1923261937518931,0.09508671612099727,0.0,0.0,0.12674242846485076,0.0,0.0,0.05699013510326322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795806018663047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573184968017095,0.11826652867870233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23502865873227236,0.11755749082989204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17299153552877355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887188849444321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067661656089066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788689390771865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09883861863382136,0.08980418844321007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198857196587686,0.12124579588006572,0.08770757136386331,0.09376022894013572,0.0,0.0,0.13340140113621046,0.13544163076175714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802055246020673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375965695445976,0.12688356733449574,0.11395177431810714,0.0,0.0,0.10074962709159868,0.0,0.09624988071886616,0.06880420319675827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10488390009894376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984767406103166,0.0,0.0,0.16573206129917115,0.0,0.14174460054835994,0.07511987917148556
mentalhealth,TheBeardliestBeard,2020/03/09,"Not sure if this goes here... issues when I was a child that resolved themselves? Hello all! I have lurked here for quite a bit and this is my first time posting in this sub.

I wanted to restate that I'm not sure that this is the place for this kind of question; but I can't think of a better one.

When I was a child I had a LOT of anxiety around my parents being imposters. This was especially true when they picked me up from school or day care. I would interrogate them pretty much every day after not having seen them to make sure they weren't imposters. I don't know when or what caused this to start and stop, but it has not been an issue for as long as my memory serves to be continuous. My mom has made a few jokes about it over the years but I haven't really asked her about it. 

I recently learned what [Capgras delusion](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Capgras_delusion) is and it immediately brought me back to those times, I even felt the waves of anxiety that used to accompany the horror of ""realizing"" my mom/dad was an imposter. I looked into it and there aren't treatments and this is normally a disease reserved for those experiencing dementia, so is my case of temporary childhood delusions unique or uncommon? Is this a common thing in children? I always thought it was a kind of phase kids went through.",5.633073703789817,6.706623644268774,5.605421994884914,81.3815856777494,67.49802371541502,8.798790978842131,29.111601953034178,9.007467420416297,2.198863008602651,1054,36,204,18,17,330,147,253,0.086,0.847,0.067,-0.4032,1,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,4,4,13,10,0,0,15,0,25,0,0,5,5,41,41,19,0,4,11,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,24,7,0,1,8,1,0,2,9,0,0,2,14,4,26,10,30,24,5,29,0,0,2,0,14,7,0,6,19,152,50,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945348622042902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20125854838504995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171002734561295,0.12297401831530065,0.0,0.0,0.10114768265756156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633821425327585,0.14360980096997822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411584146410488,0.13512987460362566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16966742275061789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688225405759697,0.0,0.1108298130284292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630095386044346,0.0,0.0,0.11188956271486784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745913561975846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739615130834326,0.07229204612466679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641053551822793,0.1104621549537384,0.0,0.0,0.11183230912428303,0.0,0.12446822619548205,0.08780531013899745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3081208141352513,0.0,0.0,0.09669850948974157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888323641786126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913626728840918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14606183020640354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374333985015842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598087973942665,0.13382550983977504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473571510080745,0.1399111147183123,0.0,0.0,0.08426917707508888,0.0,0.12988186112589695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331275322999514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310610856487167,0.0,0.0,0.10997500669334044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719303504599645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739066347508449,0.08428680571725276,0.0,0.10442965901491227,0.1534064025274304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361005820368872,0.0,0.0,0.07758688300389716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194075699942107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09344366661177568,0.0,0.0,0.08470873879431168
mentalhealth,FluidForm,2020/03/09,"Fantasizing about superpowers instead of life, am I ill? I spend alot of time fantasizing about superpowers and being a ""hero"". Its ridiculos fantasizies that have nothing to do with reality - problem is I do it often and dont have control, as in every available second my thoughts drift away from reality and dream about superpowers. Even when with people in a social situation my thoughts just off into Neverland...

​

I dont even fantasize about normal human things, like success, sex or the like, am I mentally ill?",8.047069597069594,9.580001417582416,8.478846153846153,61.28698717948717,62.2967032967033,11.341391941391942,39.34249084249085,11.20814326018867,5.120207326007325,423,22,62,12,6,140,63,91,0.08800000000000001,0.795,0.11699999999999999,0.4137,3,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,3,10,5,0,0,4,0,10,4,0,1,0,15,12,6,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,6,0,1,2,1,1,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,7,4,16,9,1,8,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,3,4,52,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21427985470282612,0.24030787075438245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18580808009652172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22181187845603895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4635615886951934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612457363792043,0.0,0.1666267549768398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13968828495239285,0.19323738565967172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19930205597440706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19376912103706592,0.1897622326062066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710634811582442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18923577377571127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22229776422240105,0.0,0.2015979798780536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313872348263471,0.0,0.0,0.3140089246659509,0.11531920133827052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24030787075438245,0.0
mentalhealth,Penny-Lane14,2020/03/09,Next level anxiety attacks So I get these really bad anxiety attacks and they’re not like regular “can’t breathe” type things. Everytime I get an attack I start gagging like I’m about to throw up. I’ve never actually thrown up even tho I’ve been having these attacks for years. I’m wondering if anyone knows what I’m talking about....,2.0521923076923088,4.800762584615383,3.9172115384615367,81.44966346153849,84.69230769230771,7.5576923076923075,26.586538461538463,8.472884824447931,2.5470384615384623,268,12,48,7,8,90,47,65,0.335,0.665,0.0,-0.9648,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,4,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,1,6,11,4,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,0,3,2,6,10,0,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,6,24,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.16914003324174515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26518604353819936,0.0,0.0,0.1211927522632928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7887280717562996,0.0,0.0,0.14471899460952453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144794166115842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111014159301006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525479461574746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693555154963889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336787952729293,0.0,0.18433292474232052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11103632536397022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268020791006785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13931193421847946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115149316513988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18796338633643345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161550887764901
mentalhealth,mladin28,2020/03/09,"Sertraline 50mg successfull story Hi! 

I just wanted to share my experience after last year I had a breakdown due to stress. I've been like you also looking for answers and some good news in this forum. Now I can share how I went through a mild medium anxiety not easy period of my life and I've survived and so far it has a successful ending.

 Last year I had a crisis after some months of too much stress, changing jobs twice because of a terrible line manager plus a period of forcing myself to fill my agenda with many activities and not listening to my body. I also had some difficulties to manage my emotions. I am from a different country and after four years living in London I was feeling low mood and a bit depressed. So tiredness +stress + being far from home and family is an explosive combo. My brain gave up and I felt as my whole word was falling apart and I couldn't put it together again and alone. So the GP gave me sertraline 50mg (Of course) without too much information and questions. I didn't hesitate and the second thing I did after the GP appointment was getting an appointment with a counsellor which helped me the most. Do it. Asking for help is key here.

I remember being incredible scared, with intrusive thoughts and thinking that I was getting mad and it would be like that for the rest of my life. Good news, it didn't! First 15 days felt terrible, sertraline increases anxiety symptoms and I remember having problems to sleep and feeling as if my heart was coming out of my chest, plus feeling depersonalization. The only advice here is PATIENCE, nobody dies of anxiety. It gets much better. I was worried about my libido and my orgasms took ages and they were weak but it got better after 6 weeks and then I didn't have more problems with that (50mg is not a high dose). 

I'd say that after 4 weeks I was already feeling much better and after 3 months I was totally recovered. I was 7 months in total and then started dropping off by half.First half I didn't feel any change.Then I started taking alternating days until I stopped. I remember feeling very angry and sensitive during this time. Once I stopped I was for four days without taking any pill but on the 5th I was feeling my anxiety symptoms back so I took half pill. It worked, maybe it was more a placebo effect but it calmed me down. I was like that until I could manage for more than 15 days and after that I just stopped. Also I had finished my therapy since the counsellor said I looked alright and I was able to put all my life together again and see things with more perspective. This period is difficult because you don't know if what you feel is because dropping off or what. Again, it is a matter of time. It is probably dropping off.

Today, after 5 months without sertraline I am completely normal and fine living my feeling in a normal way, there are phases that I feel alright and others that I feel bored or upset or something stress me... normal stuff. I have stress from life obviously but I've learnt to manage and listen to my body. I allow myself feeling how I feel in every moment. I think I can detect better the signals that something is causing me some anxiety so I stop and write it down. Writing is veery therapeutical. I also read the main chapters of the book ""Feeling Alright"" of David D. Burns and I try to apply the definitions of cognitive thinking and it works. It is not that I do it constantly but only when I feel that something is stealing my internal tranquility. In my case it is about taking a different perspective to things. It sounds easy but it is not but is not impossible neither. If you need help ask for it. It is the best advice I can give. Also I talked to everybody and told what I was going through and surprisingly I was not alone and not the only one. Unfortunately this is very common.

 So, that is my story and I hope it helps someone to feel a bit more faithful in the future which I know sounds impossible during these phases of life but it will get better soon. You will be sharing your story in not that long :)",3.9072587948449993,5.930535522349943,5.086626610936957,79.72444357366774,73.08684546615582,7.912759781725299,27.8278764658075,8.666027191798058,2.280771136653896,3226,125,582,62,66,1065,319,783,0.11199999999999999,0.762,0.126,0.9023,3,2,3,0,0,0,70.0,0,6,1,12,29,43,1,7,32,3,67,18,7,5,4,137,121,71,1,14,28,0,18,3,0,3,11,6,1,0,51,44,0,4,31,2,0,10,19,18,0,8,38,27,87,24,80,74,25,92,1,2,3,1,30,21,0,13,60,434,138,10,0.050366146650300696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843443118159637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043282765892674,0.055580295262182895,0.20138894639728935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850141370193215,0.0,0.19264982164637173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417109637600923,0.0,0.0,0.038728457857386635,0.0,0.09210820654905454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05285616356517747,0.22272381875348787,0.1099735748490269,0.11189086938698292,0.0,0.056225276746513925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05173990660347789,0.05328070484329906,0.043385975615828916,0.05280794650679989,0.05442791162757269,0.0,0.04021326976961205,0.0,0.0,0.12992799160836688,0.0,0.04338028830766634,0.0,0.05227210843396316,0.10524380672339848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665513588358245,0.04460945646782342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042435650826971066,0.0,0.0,0.04926775592981104,0.047480720589642186,0.0,0.407466193276354,0.0,0.09671879850163323,0.0,0.0,0.08568283722237566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052569313549612,0.048315797279978936,0.02862424182967092,0.0844894684092595,0.04028240851130458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05968412628414752,0.13503746570756167,0.05321459922938026,0.05052135169483623,0.05002494805930762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04998062892650308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0553598340209548,0.08211026360008086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787549441511075,0.0738190654830044,0.0,0.08894846048559593,0.04457245485531113,0.08458975629615484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051063367424098005,0.05059956398045549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16080711094080855,0.0,0.14809965196431885,0.037345859554071055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480443899154299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053638302409366234,0.034129404456364316,0.11491717233913287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05430322473582677,0.09638720049531,0.0,0.10126377721320404,0.056421611082497075,0.0,0.05037977644488041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116507758385227,0.0,0.047909739195965376,0.04005318136542154,0.05042529924227465,0.0,0.040135297953300335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04166339697852715,0.0,0.05040252047906157,0.0,0.04267507261247618,0.11632296107607935,0.0,0.0,0.07129883566443393,0.0,0.0,0.16843341538563442,0.28847125409236496,0.0,0.057657187919582985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469942244556486,0.11360722241020943,0.04048240084178507,0.0,0.0,0.057598078147824285,0.0,0.10038308951621394,0.09681777923293808,0.0,0.039985094487164086,0.058737810291225,0.0,0.04774121786553481,0.04812701151815912,0.11191728427871232,0.034195307454858034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311469151217496,0.029707258236210177,0.03997830285985363,0.08080136960747683,0.0,0.0,0.04668992254165949,0.0,0.0562320040562693,0.0,0.1456535041522659,0.0,0.07333430923866076,0.05114926675431869,0.0,0.03577866550503022,0.0,0.0,0.09730244137143222
mentalhealth,gacha_mind,2020/03/09,how to tell my mum i don't feel comfortable with her in tbe room with a therapist? i live in the UK and i go to a therapist but for some reason my mum is always in the room (I'm 13) and i feel very uncomfortable to talk about anything when she's around how to nice tell her to stop?,0.19285714285714306,1.8208418571428595,2.5526190476190465,95.4632142857143,82.80952380952381,6.73968253968254,18.436507936507933,7.793537801064563,0.23186984126984145,219,5,56,4,6,75,41,63,0.141,0.799,0.059000000000000004,-0.631,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,3,0,13,6,6,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,9,2,13,6,1,9,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,1,2,35,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092098679894212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069054334982972,0.2238259702568471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542610843587548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14289344022458733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22201726070335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585118740300253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210206704481882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20208987749807247,0.4395217337619226,0.0,0.0,0.5838591240270716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20745604851390625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Eddie_Bingo,2020/03/09,"Should I try to get help? So, some backstory. I've been having problems for years with self esteem, depression and anxiety but recently (the last month or so) I've started to open up about it to some close friends and they've been good help in making me feel slightly better.

But whenever I try to go to a GP and get help, I have a bit of a breakdown and go back to step one. All my friends say that I should go, and I'm pretty much living off of the support they're giving me at the moment, so currently I'm feeling not awful.

But do you think I'm sort of rushing into this, because I really want help and this the best way to do it. But I don't think I'm going to be feeling better than I am now for a while so if I end up cancelling I'll probably feel really really bad. Should I go?",5.015220249835637,3.9162568994082814,6.46587771203156,82.15070348454968,68.76331360946745,9.877975016436556,30.02038132807364,9.150863307647796,2.2169521367521368,612,19,137,10,9,211,96,169,0.068,0.635,0.297,0.993,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,3,7,10,0,0,8,1,12,0,0,1,1,33,34,17,0,6,7,0,4,0,2,3,0,1,0,1,5,10,0,0,6,0,0,7,2,3,0,1,2,5,13,7,22,28,6,27,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,5,11,86,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473844214054996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052780196686212,0.11431704203818575,0.08346119035964741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368225680231378,0.24217770465061694,0.14947406657164658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11792338498223726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212647106352642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769102895086259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115580395104803,0.0,0.14306329121407044,0.13133989158766818,0.3890554467002489,0.11483653634926312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3670808949613248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111602764795297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208971166238949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091390815142236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928303839789773,0.0,0.10064716577297006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277612155037428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392902366806902,0.14761589482493534,0.13100771565595876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631308552546409,0.0,0.1351855501870669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887909947530873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14283062575511454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690807017246644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15536780156179833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17545726717532115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18591053968963894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075512142542063,0.10867555249156452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816779618257475
mentalhealth,Andra8951,2020/03/09,"Depressed In Bed and Okay About It. Just got out of a hospital stay... 10 days in psych which was actually a really REALLY positive, necessary and beautiful experience. Substance use played a big part. Got home three days ago and felt disoriented and a little weirded out, but yoga and meditation are my therapy so I stayed holed up and did those all day and some writing. Abnormally warm and beautiful outside today, went to aftercare and had a great talk with the social worker... on the way home pulled over my car because I didn't want to come home and also couldn't think of anywhere to go or anyone to see. I'm at home now, in bed looking out the window and posting and trying to find sad music. And it's all okay. I kept thinking why am I not okay? But I am. This is normal, to be expected, and recovery always seems to come along a lot sooner when you are patient with yourself and don't over question the process. I'm happier just to write this and share my experience and know I'm not alone and if you are reading this in bed feeling like crap or worse feeling nothing, you're not alone either. Tl;dr it's okay to not be okay; not alone; sad music and tear jerker movies exist for a reason. Take advantage of feeling empty. You're still human and you are still here.",4.505164444444446,5.776471072000008,5.544266666666669,80.05057777777779,70.28,8.595555555555555,28.288888888888888,8.998388855275968,2.2741422222222223,1008,36,192,19,18,333,146,250,0.084,0.715,0.201,0.9813,0,3,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,3,0,2,10,16,1,0,11,5,15,1,1,2,2,64,38,28,0,5,13,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,8,28,0,1,11,3,0,6,8,5,0,1,9,7,11,11,29,26,6,33,0,3,2,0,10,14,1,7,10,120,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.10837308297159308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844303255617777,0.0,0.0,0.3450566250584243,0.0,0.08881017040918489,0.09240616431197614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765182461454054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769773669345765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913270791043956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21486271867359888,0.0,0.09565099937022344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21726504250004552,0.0,0.0,0.16845733735120258,0.07933729167088506,0.10662964788241816,0.0,0.10150171751114308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06311477963919196,0.0,0.17764071109066149,0.12243787750300968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4455865064678801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06103259862542487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05425557445159958,0.11130569242534767,0.0,0.0,0.09325773342982796,0.0,0.0,0.09441448682150257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088097413133404,0.10655970017520768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202611023063138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635942513447272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244063535918266,0.0,0.11108446146840484,0.0,0.14228859567896096,0.11418242809379965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849598536615583,0.1010997626486544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132059841238942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367384465490555,0.17737638827488042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349909435165724,0.0892613269409371,0.0,0.0,0.1270003946854819,0.0,0.0,0.14231836166012146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526659407155116,0.0,0.0,0.07539865361501509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591535243309383,0.0,0.0,0.0655027674940703,0.0881498203642569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294854934928624,0.10020933032458368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317392997461047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heyits_anna,2020/03/09,"Expenses of getting help I'm not going to go into much detail about my mental health/state, but I will say I've been struggling a lot for the last 5 years and while some things get better/easier to deal with, other things have gotten worse. I haven't told my parents yet or tried receiving proper help due to the financial state of my family not being the great. I was wondering how expensive things like medicine and therapy add up to be. Of course I know costs can range based on insurance and location, but does anyone have an idea of a base amount by chance?",11.54536363636364,7.12377762727273,10.475,68.94250000000002,59.09090909090909,14.636363636363635,38.40909090909091,12.161744961471696,4.310727272727272,449,12,87,10,4,143,84,110,0.107,0.795,0.09699999999999999,-0.4838,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,6,0,9,0,0,1,0,17,18,8,0,0,5,1,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,6,0,0,3,0,3,3,3,1,0,0,4,2,7,2,15,11,4,12,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,4,6,55,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330096102660732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860690379656504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19654300306126246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683165083612145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17971982820369134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992046180580504,0.0,0.21669190190056212,0.0,0.0,0.21018291351460452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20264298691818547,0.0,0.0,0.2555659416773789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21521103496066293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477157608472852,0.1553982572790346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313780135044752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207657567113448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19212178052100465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14014342915143213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21168481149578808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15160576302574386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929987593490345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21801515606837546,0.0,0.3799612006382503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821661115203773,0.0,0.12943305629822593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206742561486088,0.0,0.0,0.1942799632031905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276686782837312
mentalhealth,jnaffy99,2020/03/09,"Starting therapy for the first time in a couple hours, advice? Well, I have finally committed to starting therapy to start working through my mental health issues. I'm ready to move forward and do whatever it takes to improve myself and I am excited for this new challenge. For those that have gone through therapy before (specifically for anxiety), what do you wish you knew before you started? Did you notice any changes? Have any advice for me? I know that I shouldn't go into it expecting to find all the answers, and it's just one step towards improvement, but I'm curious to see other people's thoughts on it.",6.063684210526319,7.5506723421052655,6.528903508771932,73.63440789473684,66.80701754385964,9.910526315789477,36.17982456140351,10.125756701596842,4.065319298245615,493,25,81,12,8,160,78,114,0.0,0.845,0.155,0.9083,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,4,0,3,2,3,0,0,3,0,8,1,0,0,2,16,22,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,10,4,0,0,5,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,4,1,11,3,17,17,1,18,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,10,58,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820940228341022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19631178977761984,0.0,0.1104194183562426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456447801996897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15269218492210634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597090501217949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581170043607933,0.13192380268301132,0.122775211629498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08203153542291948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342627217526136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214545601580575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506530683058499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932528331264986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14546039336121835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534101789874658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940410964867134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16433162019474978,0.0,0.0,0.09780826571005748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006692219878036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150199937296797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4086573190810111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10852543501294808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4951948229047279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458953967516465,0.08416559631938977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977865772694547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598344583252975,0.0,0.0,0.10508096636800407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prof-Relaxo,2020/03/09,"Help? At the moment I feel like things are slowly coming to a close in my life. I’ve tried and I want to keep living but just things in my mind aren’t working properly anymore. Whether or not it’s just a period of life I should push through, I just want things to stop.",1.705263157894734,3.3695847894736843,2.726175438596492,95.82189473684211,78.29824561403508,5.963508771929827,20.171929824561406,6.742157984588678,0.03669403508771918,211,5,49,2,5,67,41,57,0.054000000000000006,0.8270000000000001,0.11900000000000001,0.1027,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,17,8,4,0,3,7,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,8,7,0,9,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,4,32,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25762939021396786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237752397225524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135126585407705,0.185585036323094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741233245957642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23090210143460754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669769397923768,0.1269141225175643,0.0,0.2293882157262619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623011337194311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21718554999750506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5177537119249596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17637181173138045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3064468985172406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18912105117882766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Whitabitosis,2020/03/09,"I start going insane when falling asleep For the past month when I'm half asleep I get like voices in my head saying straight up nonsense, things like ""Iranian backscratcher"" and ""Can't see the pork yesterday"" Mostly it isn't even like a language just like sounds. It isn't like normal anxiety thoughts or conscious racing thoughts, it gets worse the more relaxed I'am.

 I've also started hearing voices outloud when I'm going to sleep, it usually is barley audible but sometimes it gets pretty loud, it again is usually nonsense or commonly it just counts 1-20ish or just says ""thank-you"" over and over.

I'm pretty sure I'm probably just going crazy, I don't want to take any meds because they have the worst side-effects known to man, I'll just get use to it.",5.516506849315069,6.698897773972603,5.379342465753428,82.49956164383562,67.83561643835617,8.031780821917808,31.03835616438357,8.238735603445708,2.272352876712328,609,24,111,8,10,189,92,146,0.133,0.705,0.162,0.3762,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,0,11,8,0,0,5,0,7,4,4,1,1,20,27,10,0,2,9,0,0,5,0,0,0,8,0,1,9,2,0,0,4,1,0,4,4,1,0,1,2,9,5,7,9,25,3,21,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,4,17,56,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117272594717027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972417392216684,0.0,0.11218363698905856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893939196595753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685816903877296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30646551543095113,0.0,0.2500265658486769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15050089996066296,0.0,0.16528047651976147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3582186569672363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289042686917873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705127991343955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368174991120405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13999001113553303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983830010940537,0.15810897718560096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332372550441964,0.0,0.0,0.11685771773787546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675170764330486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14503644770269766,0.0,0.20759330659032665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13821193271382184,0.0,0.1102593926576677,0.0,0.0,0.13501175181172706,0.0,0.0,0.0974249545789739,0.0,0.0,0.23284077226685054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665488874981048,0.32301926543764464,0.0,0.08649549336278838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14944460033456994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sirajanahara,2020/03/09,"Anyone here tried WOOP technique? Does it help with depression/anxiety? I just hear about the WOOP (wish, outcome, obstacle, plan) technique on a podcast and I am curious if anyone here has tried it. From what they described it seems like it may be helpful for anxiety and depression.",4.859200000000001,7.8173945200000015,4.829999999999998,78.245,73.8,8.8,34.0,9.3871,3.8774,226,12,36,6,5,70,38,50,0.13699999999999998,0.6779999999999999,0.185,0.4137,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,8,7,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,5,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,3,1,25,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42263743539600696,0.0,0.0,0.38629931893654496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23792046159722965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417347654462497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113364773694888,0.0,0.3703084675947777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495427546746475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514736108886514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37509033026326055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176561646001753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thefleshweasel,2020/03/09,Help me figure out what's wrong with me. I just got a much needed weekend job. But 4 weeks in and I'm ready to quit even though I really need the income. I have a tendency to quit when times get hard and the team lead is basically doing a trial by fire. How do I motivate myself to not be such a lazy quitter?,1.0249751243781091,2.6117416716417914,3.5590298507462705,89.4351616915423,80.044776119403,6.854726368159205,18.629353233830845,7.793537801064563,0.4308726368159204,240,5,55,4,6,84,54,67,0.105,0.745,0.151,0.4606,2,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,0,6,0,5,0,0,3,0,13,10,6,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,7,0,7,8,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,37,8,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740262176484894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376575538734209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21072922223414947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23602654776642346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766052550770351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614634886466605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19368829735460624,0.3907345279658056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.560487348435288,0.0,0.0,0.1687921924885442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588680040916964,0.0,0.15363745038896134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113479605875507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880742873559549,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lavera2020,2020/03/09,"Can intimacy issues be enough to keep you not only from entering a relationship, but also from expriencing infatuation? I'm a 22f and I can most safely say I've never been in love, I've never been in a relationship. This is in big part because of my family history and childhood experiences and I've already talked to a specialist about this.

However, while trust and intimacy issues obviously can keep you from creating a deeper and meaningful relationship, can keep you from love, would it be possible that they also refrain you from even being just infatuated with another person (which as an initial stage does't require much trust, but is based more in attraction)?",7.53892857142857,9.089454016806727,8.754107142857139,58.79401785714289,63.45378151260504,12.672689075630252,35.883403361344534,12.161744961471696,5.335713445378152,544,25,82,20,8,187,76,119,0.069,0.757,0.174,0.9159999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,4,1,1,5,6,0,0,6,0,12,2,0,0,3,22,18,11,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,5,6,0,6,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,1,7,6,15,12,5,11,0,0,0,2,13,5,0,1,4,65,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990568571686152,0.24625365426375645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16144713292840174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385645230349328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590883878702471,0.0,0.10169331602429113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15060862515210666,0.14514576347713026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32140171622190994,0.0,0.4105570741559993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779212676851288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318297610118642,0.0,0.23749666753736604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709834018704875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667305432039484,0.0,0.0,0.13443747005046794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735739154132713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4959066892571037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244021398108874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375231261443652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937327101251583,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Batch_23,2020/03/09,"Examining mental health literacy, psychological strain, and stigma in university athletes | participants required Hey everyone!

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I am currently seeking participants for my dissertation, which is about mental health literacy, psychological strain, and stigma in student athletes. If you are currently a student, and play sport at any level, then please feel free to click the link and answer the following questionnaire.

[https://forms.gle/X9DFEr64QuViUXGL7](https://forms.gle/X9DFEr64QuViUXGL7)

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Many thanks in advance for your time and effort!",18.24405405405405,20.580542729729725,14.427702702702707,24.57371621621624,40.62162162162162,15.508108108108113,50.93243243243244,14.191785591663535,8.446848648648649,478,24,43,15,4,143,55,74,0.03,0.8240000000000001,0.146,0.8774,2,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,2,0,3,1,5,0,2,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,11,6,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,4,2,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,4,8,6,0,11,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,1,4,26,5,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3947097617362111,0.4426541288276665,0.1238653791674688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17404810230145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09209838126062853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3872249017497687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18466723606830526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36712021825987196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999413734834936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16769536585257674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621067143004408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4426541288276665,0.0
mentalhealth,Canners19,2020/03/09,Anxiety and depression affecting study I've been suffering from anxiety and depression for over a year and a half now but haven't able to get help due to a busy schedule like work and a course I'm taking. I'm repeating a Spanish exam because I failed it last year when I was in secondary school because of said anxiety and depression.  I need to do well in Spanish to get into a course I want to get into.,10.846910569105685,6.349316536585366,10.89926829268293,65.60386178861789,60.463414634146346,15.32357723577236,45.6260162601626,13.023866798666859,5.679157723577236,324,15,63,9,3,110,50,82,0.239,0.637,0.124,-0.8442,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,3,7,0,0,6,0,4,0,0,1,0,11,13,7,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,1,3,1,4,2,13,10,0,13,0,5,0,0,2,5,0,0,9,38,5,4,0.20150371337112175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4624493675669722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456695867623742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5206645591807907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315832120432038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506369155668144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16425242073982613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984445360074188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941245022040564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916761753019946,0.0,0.0,0.2039325157014047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150571500853835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885211092747855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811760379437628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14669710323182011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595235697044985
mentalhealth,suelikesfrogs,2020/03/09,"I cannot get diagnosed and it is devastating now There's no realistic way for me to get diagnosed the way I am living right now and it hasn't been the biggest issue up until right now. Its always been an issue tho and not easy to cope with not knowing wtf is going on.

I have showing more and more symptoms of anxiety and I easily get panic attacks. I am incredibly avoidant of situations that scare me in the slightest.

I have been avoiding my dentist like the plague because he recommended taking my wisdom teeth out but he only does it with numbing and no anesthesia or narcotics.

Today I noticed one of my wisdom teeths break through (no pain at all). I told my dad and he asked if I wanted them taken out and I replied with no and that was the end of it, my mother on the other hand decided she's going to make an appointment despite my disapproval. Now my issue isn't the pain at all, in fact I'd willingly endure more pain keeping them in if it means not having someone use needles and knives im my mouth while I'm 100% aware of it.

Thinking about the procedure makes me jittery and scared and I have no idea how I am expected no to panic either before or in the middle of it. And that's just my worst nightmare.

I just don't know what to do, I don't know how to tell my dentist no when my mother will be right next to me.",3.5276373626373636,4.6679791538461535,5.077822344322346,82.969260989011,72.47985347985349,7.804322344322344,27.569413919413925,8.238735603445708,1.80735326007326,1051,38,212,16,20,355,143,273,0.19899999999999998,0.741,0.06,-0.9908,0,2,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,0,12,15,1,6,11,0,22,13,4,5,3,49,42,24,0,4,11,3,1,1,0,2,9,0,0,0,13,18,0,3,7,1,0,2,15,12,0,1,6,1,32,3,31,33,7,31,0,0,0,0,12,16,0,4,11,157,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09694765379435592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913167019958614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892336978031636,0.13254967989823974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102488008766092,0.0,0.0991434743134143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365152751138556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196078995861238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319540728595623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826187667520656,0.0,0.13243336851661586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152832224836286,0.12585339001676846,0.3648260369060416,0.0,0.1035615781526312,0.0,0.0,0.1920965106309704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05692207535624193,0.0,0.10288258739366928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554586889115915,0.0,0.0,0.12691616480609288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12391226352521799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326501442645392,0.0,0.0,0.07895182035768684,0.08861293353978303,0.37193223797437297,0.2734044043357356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985028693700737,0.0,0.0,0.2332984844402275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309648238449792,0.0,0.0,0.09872058186538828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211009996240112,0.08760282770764874,0.0,0.10183697664299607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465644395877817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104401356137352,0.11133259511141186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062930812551936,0.0,0.0,0.06872203464855096,0.18496424627812552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExceptionHunter,2020/03/09,"Doubting everything in my life I'm 21 y/o form a extremely religious community (Muslim), since i was 16 i have started to doubt my religion, and now i guess i completely deny it for many reasons. in Islam you have to pray 5 times a day, and i have stopped doing that a year ago, but as a consequence i had to hide this from my family and friends, when i'm at home lock my self in a room for hours, and with friends i keep my visits very short and avoid them most of the time. I have been pretending to be someone i'm not for very long time now which kills me from the inside, if someone finds out about the REAL me i'm sure i will be treated like a criminal. I never kissed or had sex nor talked to a girl for long time and i'm worrying it will keep like this for my whole life (i was raised that all of this are sins and taboos ). And recently i lost the purpose for living as result of this situation, all of my thinking is who will death will solve all of my problem though i'm not a suicidal, i guess because i know this will break my mom's heart (i love here despite her believes). I really don't know what to do, can you help me out ?",5.888181189488241,4.293556680497924,6.686483402489627,82.89440006915629,67.25726141078839,10.522959889349927,31.70159059474412,9.516144504307137,2.426211341632088,884,28,204,15,12,295,136,241,0.162,0.6970000000000001,0.141,-0.5622,0,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,1,1,6,15,1,3,12,0,22,6,1,2,5,39,38,16,3,2,5,1,0,2,2,5,2,0,2,2,12,11,0,5,5,1,0,1,5,7,0,0,6,0,32,8,29,25,6,27,3,1,0,3,14,8,0,7,19,133,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128287970544906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759060236259589,0.0,0.0,0.14340447783706886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334539190103166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208707598127943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143938518666751,0.0,0.11999118805548807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633445647066575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19667722985418215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28043339103862475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083109801098776,0.08531518551651504,0.0,0.12767533720528626,0.0,0.12534822396764636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262701526723081,0.14081990248220158,0.0,0.13990293686018918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980764938502225,0.12436819630441533,0.0,0.11239331792809384,0.22528309369445884,0.0,0.0,0.13894455015883606,0.0,0.1148779760997998,0.0,0.0,0.12904509550910334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490724399020904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981685810675349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179274616251072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487604482301547,0.08154081943721303,0.13086823589300134,0.12567671542346992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327840429834562,0.0,0.0,0.10528990377141574,0.1430715484193907,0.0,0.0,0.21569313184527755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009164027109076,0.0,0.0,0.10641437919107044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922706328609435,0.0,0.11996282469548622,0.0,0.0,0.1023053422951618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155787732216575,0.125055009171383,0.0,0.2968792197378517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21004379157604566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421070466003984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926217651710728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819661495997079
mentalhealth,supplementaries,2020/03/09,"I'm having a shitty day  Today has been an awful day and I really need someone to vent to. Recently I moved school and have struggled to fit on or make any friends. i mind my own business and am constantly focused on my own work. Unlike at my previous school I’m genuinely well behaved and have changed my ways for the better. but last week I failed to hand in my homework so I gave it in a day later. For this reason, I was suspended from school today. I defended myself because I know this punishment is way harsh but the teachers did not listen to me. I don’t understand how missing lessons is going to benefit me especially with my exams round the corner. i thought if they dont want to listen to me, my mum will defend me. So I told her to call the school and stand up for me since they are not interested in anything I have to say. somehow she realised the fault lies in me and my lack of respect, and now she blames me. Well anyways once I was dismissed from school I had to go straight to the hospital to have a chat with my dads doctors. I later found out that my dad is dying and that completely crushed me. I miss how my dad used to be and now he’s just bed ridden unable to speak or recognise me. I just feel so damn alone. My dad is the only person who would argue with anyone to prove my innocence and if he wasn’t in hospital I know he would be in my school arguing with my teachers because he is never afraid to speak his mind. I miss him so damn much. i feel like I have nothing to live for. I feel so demotivated, like I am right now as im writing this paragraph.",3.2625562372188126,4.368032407975463,4.656579754601228,85.87061605316974,73.079754601227,7.641922290388548,27.387014314928425,8.07648339933343,1.6368695296523517,1239,45,261,18,24,413,172,326,0.198,0.703,0.099,-0.99,0,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,4,16,21,5,2,11,1,28,2,1,5,2,50,51,24,1,7,10,5,5,2,1,3,1,5,2,1,7,15,0,0,11,1,0,4,6,12,2,0,10,10,55,9,41,36,4,37,0,4,1,0,31,15,2,5,17,181,62,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489818042475753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068875609650351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081911649151945,0.0,0.08334691187143126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123481809343304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957618811810343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034208114074727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107143512239051,0.0,0.10619283058493656,0.1094504592753758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19595660474127294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051153002991796,0.0,0.0,0.10366698543265113,0.0,0.0,0.11870239863638946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363450706980655,0.07235627660846962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105109241558564,0.07825064975501107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512241866284607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940253818153883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132448550409864,0.08255879927697139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896307952775778,0.0,0.08943435050936438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760689107412343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045330136754845,0.0,0.0,0.10764732588196044,0.07445433069770026,0.07509973023025297,0.07811534929343257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097183341891445,0.0,0.0,0.10786261419742894,0.0,0.07702994606400831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843601925037907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06488419739538319,0.10413533380058088,0.10000430297145578,0.0,0.0,0.08649474747086601,0.0,0.0805439518951614,0.0,0.6150201094390729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378197505490925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581637908516301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588251593896647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040703427563382,0.0,0.0,0.1920080365200517,0.09677982043950656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543871033442752,0.0,0.08747560731512385,0.0,0.0,0.05973907431932823,0.16078675364220252,0.08124275531763714,0.0,0.1821303586641057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07373490537112318,0.0,0.0,0.14389644043596914,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MooMiah,2020/03/09,"My brother thinks everyone’s against him. Hello,
This is my first time posting on reddit so if I’ve done something wrong just let me know, but basically I have a brother who’s 23 and he acts as if everyone’s against him. He’s had a history of depression and he’s never been able to stick to one thing. He started at an Islamic bordering school and left, he started college again and then left, nearly every job except his last he started then left. His most recent job changed him. He started telling me how everyone at work was trying to “pattern” him. Pattern is slang for a lot of things, but in this context he is saying everyone is trying to help him get better. They will do things to teach him lessons, but they never told him that they were doing it. So he kept telling me about it and what he learnt and I was there to geo him figure out things they did and why. At first it was a good thing, it helped him a lot. He was getting better with his social anxiety, he wasn’t going in late and it seemed as though he was changing his life around. He was using some drugs to help himself think more which I didn’t agree with but nonetheless he told me he was going to stop once he had learnt and understood everything. Then one week he started acting really weird, getting high more and acting as if everyone around him knew something about him and were disgusted by it. Now he had told me what it was eventually and I was very understanding about it and tried to help, but I couldn’t. Then this one time he came home after work told us that he “failed the final pattern” the last thing to sort him out . He was acting deranged and stuff and I didn’t know what to think. He was telling us a lot of stuff that he had done which he thinks everyone knew about, how everyone in our city knows and he was scared. He started saying they are gonna kill us all and that he needs to go back to work or they’ll kill him. He started acting crazy. We, after a good, got him to calm down and leave. He promised us he’d stop his drug abuse and at first he was fine, but after a while he started acting strange. We thought he had moved onto more hardcore drugs and we were about to kick him out. We asked about it and he said yes he did do the drug in question and so we were gonna kick him out. After that he started denying it and after a drug test he was clean. I don’t know why he agreed, he doesn’t know why he agreed, but it makes no sense. He was fine for a little bit again, then after a couple weeks he started acting weird again. No personality, very cold. Randomly saying strange things and just being weird . Then today he started again with the entire everyone knows and I think he’s felt exactly the same as before, but he has just stopped talking about it because he feels as though he can’t trust us. Today he came out his room and went to the lobby window saying stuff like “ I’ll batter them” this and that then went back to his room. Then I went in asked what’s up and he goes “ you know what’s up, why do you keep asking? They are watching me all the time.” I just left the room. I don’t know what to do anymore. We’ve tried taking him to a psychiatrist, but I don’t think he’s opening up at all. I genuinely don’t know what to do. I’ve always looked up to him and it breaks me seeing him like this . He use to trust me now he doesn’t even speak to me . I just want to know if anyone else has experienced anything like this before . The thing he did was bad, but it’s not something that other people haven’t done and it’s not something others would want or kill him over.",2.9980646705440246,4.366982754433836,3.688291807280823,91.52379311170151,74.11596180081855,6.617256647758551,23.091572724444127,7.0608816371341465,0.5758427467030476,2801,75,614,27,57,886,255,733,0.10800000000000001,0.7959999999999999,0.096,-0.9297,2,0,9,0,1,0,62.0,11,2,8,10,31,25,4,1,22,1,65,6,0,5,6,128,133,67,3,9,24,2,2,3,0,5,6,6,6,1,51,48,0,5,27,0,0,16,18,12,0,6,52,13,75,13,80,72,13,108,1,2,3,0,131,36,0,15,57,392,126,10,0.04344106465754586,0.05147055808373095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036146445786211207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03323229555959985,0.0,0.04308186317799904,0.030375002463619138,0.04451050436916999,0.03574829479456917,0.07734351517151522,0.1218345940263958,0.0,0.0,0.06680699452951812,0.03627147445456783,0.02648126980985536,0.0,0.07393029287594967,0.0,0.0,0.0768401829778497,0.04742639146893636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993700102731202,0.0,0.0,0.09190977265613601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048066711781319334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03741572533472865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336587468051322,0.0,0.0,0.2518892168875457,0.0,0.03628943528571327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02869241350387065,0.0,0.03660097057173788,0.3320783912497023,0.03904202781818307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02196510754880294,0.0,0.0417102345398952,0.04758756294987629,0.0,0.11085284221749103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06808848995923393,0.0,0.0740656744338336,0.07287260797479349,0.0347437878234191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647051976644113,0.04589786989064999,0.04357492981943045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862171072127498,0.03861241426397975,0.1441833051431387,0.0,0.238740730537994,0.07082053139512813,0.04900341309330268,0.045997815077771,0.1887953754290532,0.04442143183451878,0.030683708672534043,0.0636693296962328,0.04353935916403031,0.0,0.0,0.036479553400630964,0.0,0.0,0.11079611911401753,0.0,0.0,0.028997247984307212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04617097686128457,0.0,0.03221099900383866,0.06700885424117428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04626331609730889,0.08831036902662899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030116564493398695,0.03793106205899377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04160453172253949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048663934371144274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02782945839165791,0.0,0.04289281058023703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04132240039303594,0.138184312849377,0.04349208407720573,0.04396467664119152,0.03461690419846282,0.039547113731943806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04428269475609748,0.0,0.13377221564710098,0.0,0.0,0.3382259006999805,0.0,0.0,0.10895602564746147,0.0,0.0,0.14918887754768848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032662274315272535,0.034916282253452384,0.11390821575937972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308825046037561,0.16701168095546393,0.08536125092741284,0.0344873529240817,0.07599250243680894,0.0,0.08235409972997408,0.16603919562485114,0.0,0.11797452542439275,0.0,0.0,0.045223680339934534,0.2612712601290641,0.07503826422408562,0.0,0.07168685571761553,0.05124533090839156,0.0,0.06969160348731396,0.0,0.0,0.1208109064648444,0.15679521611224995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487683735382917,0.0,0.0,0.030859285947686138,0.04749598471044894,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jimmy1421,2020/03/09,"I hate the way I look I’m not too sure what’s wrong with me but I thought this sub is good to say it in. Everyday I’m battling the fact that I always look very anxious. I know some people say it’s just me or I’m being paranoid but I literally catch people laughing at me. I also suffer with depression, so that may be a problem too. I just feel like everything is against me. I know I’m gonna die alone and I’m okay with it. I’m starting to forget a time when I was happy when I was younger. 

Everyday I wake up and I think to myself “what embarrassing thing am I gonna do today” I’ve been called weird, just the other day I had the balls to go to the bar with some friends. Guy literally walked up to my friends “oh you’re friends with this guy? I feel so bad for you.” Like what the fuck. 

 The only thing I’m going out of my apartment now for is my job but even then I’m struggling to handle the stares people give me. I just hope it gets better. I’m not sure what I’m asking you to whoever is reading this but just wanted to let this out since I’ve never told anyone about this. Thank you",-0.2209539371304068,1.817418432773109,2.0276097105508875,96.2257780890134,87.36134453781513,4.870463741051977,18.4786803610333,6.238725200709706,-0.2589780890133833,849,23,201,8,27,286,123,238,0.21600000000000005,0.618,0.165,-0.9019,1,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,3,0,1,15,25,3,2,10,1,14,3,1,0,4,38,46,13,1,3,12,0,2,2,3,3,0,2,0,2,18,9,1,0,6,3,0,4,3,11,0,0,6,7,29,14,25,34,2,23,0,2,3,1,14,7,1,5,13,123,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319986843238665,0.0,0.10284836303570452,0.10701277443908816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452912693509956,0.0,0.0899262214174871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12023181113976568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738292603751644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374397938736865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132390301590766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294199786340127,0.0,0.1107705194419858,0.0,0.1334755675778816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494485993347772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155852429105384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005688656376976,0.09187810966290942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2980883808444861,0.11889670789829118,0.06719275860021201,0.12337322251062885,0.1461826216376401,0.10787090944041712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546857451785977,0.0,0.13690639536321791,0.0,0.12697450495187793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773749778441618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276243299482054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14136000035849386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13151115031569904,0.0,0.1256634683212297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159979015801088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919098888372543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781274221853087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674833212156436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230611953371626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864354350508772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204549664293851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10638647886103417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910299282262077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444977915967524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424244311455255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11840564880417748,0.0,0.0,0.17088386457983798,0.08240728769704657,0.0,0.10210097394620836,0.07499279062760368,0.0,0.12190604784025212,0.12289116262315836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061156796235145,0.07585676708009954,0.10208363168975078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061346801960106,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blasphemousash,2020/03/09,"Does anyone else have occaisional lifelike visual hallucinations when going to bed? Basically what it says in the title. Sometimes, in that weird place between falling asleep and waking up, I’ll be gazing into my room and suddenly see a human figure standing there, oftentimes someone I know but sometimes someone I don’t recognize. I’ll usually absentmindedly look at it for a few seconds before suddenly realizing I’m hallucinating, after which it dissapears immediately. These hallucinations are relatively uncommon (I think around once per month?) but I’ve had them for a while.

Another recurring hallucination I have is even weirder, because I can control it. When my room is dark and I’m in that transitory state between waking and dreaming, I can turn the wall next to my bed into a lush green jungle when it’s dark and I’m close enough, complete with animals, wind and everything. I can’t always make it happen, but I can always make it go away. 

Nome of these hallucinations are accompanied by any delusions or feelings of panic, and I am immediately able to snap out of them when I notice what’s happening, bring me back to a completely normal ‘awake’ state, albeit sometimes a bit rattled when I didn’t see it coming. A friend told me about hypnagogia, but I don’t think that’s what’s happening to me because the hallucinations described online seem to be a lot less detailed and lifelike than what I have.

I’m 18 now, and I started using drugs (including psychedelics) at 14/15, so perhaps this is some type of HPPD. The hallucinations don’t seem psychedelic at all, though, and I never really did much of the ‘serious’ psychedelics that are often correlated with HPPD. 

I’m not particularly concerned because these hallucinations aren’t affecting my life in any serious way, and I’ve always been able to distinguish between them and the real world. It’s definitely not normal, though, and I was wondering if anyone else on here has any experience with this kind of stuff.",9.680349563046192,9.195572303370787,10.022209737827717,58.434712858926325,59.1123595505618,12.854931335830214,40.28339575530587,12.06081838636515,5.168277028714108,1604,73,252,44,18,540,191,356,0.033,0.943,0.024,0.2287,1,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,3,1,16,6,0,1,14,0,26,5,3,5,2,53,54,28,0,3,8,0,1,0,1,0,2,1,4,1,24,22,0,1,10,1,0,5,9,4,0,1,6,6,26,2,39,46,8,46,0,0,4,0,7,20,0,8,17,174,50,1,0.19734681622989744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463125403406617,0.0,0.0,0.20130390352052085,0.10346767190146816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379894824499721,0.2022051345953103,0.0,0.08784025319966449,0.0,0.0,0.09270691505396396,0.07587376009440439,0.0,0.18045118120023165,0.0,0.08396380266590807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772580547288213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499840395037134,0.20691438213674568,0.0,0.11067061757110916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634976438975478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442982667959208,0.0,0.1648579419697168,0.0,0.0,0.1019560076473585,0.0,0.06517285544884796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868129671563152,0.0965215270789612,0.0,0.0,0.04989223994710023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07623483033963747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121567435226154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617697067663436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275317027858,0.05422832456741937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969594627094912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286081128369098,0.0,0.0,0.08388860298486328,0.0,0.0,0.13173053225659878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876017295812675,0.0,0.07253630847233901,0.0,0.07610301536090434,0.0,0.10494028895565648,0.0,0.1933579792087933,0.0,0.11234032914181462,0.0,0.10508395929075573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11577198404943252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309270991576526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231194079303272,0.06321271191545373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846905459361171,0.0,0.0,0.1572598619567982,0.17965712966763348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721131697696764,0.0,0.29277157109459,0.0,0.06984154613300507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11295744488555863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645187132493185,0.19389224496135984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428667000984084,0.0,0.0,0.10732833324664053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522214324614172,0.10867481856452074,0.0,0.0,0.07832235849255323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700710197487803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,99BottlesofGrog,2020/03/09,"Rationally, I know the world is real. That doesn't mean I believe it. You know... I can remember back before my brain turned into a scrambled egg, how hard I found it to believe that the ""crazy"" people managed to get to the point where they believed some of the stuff they spouted. 

Now, I realize that it isn't (usually) like just flipping a switch and going from ""Normal"" to ""The ants are eating my eyeballs"", but that it's so insidious that you only notice it in retrospect. Everything seems perfectly logical, perfectly rational- until, of course, you realise it isn't, that your behavior isn't normal, and ""holy shit, I need help before this gets any worse"". 

I've also come to realize that one of my biggest issues is that my brain can't agree with itself. The most annoying one of these by far is the fact that I know that the world is real, however I simultaneously  somehow don't believe it. I have this awful, gut wrenching fear that one day, I'm going to be walking or talking to someone and all of a sudden, someone is going to rip up the curtain and say ""Surprise! You actually killed yourself years ago, this is your own personal hell! Your kids don't exist, your family is wrecked, none of the last few years actually happened, and the entire world is a lie!"" It's like ""Wevebeenfuckingwithyou-o-phobia"". ""Just a Dream trope Syndrome"". 

I don't know how to rationalize this disconnect. It feels absolutely insane- but then everything around me still feels ""odd"". Out of place. Like it doesn't belong, it never belonged, and it's *wrong*. Like everything is slightly not right. It's just the strangest, most annoying feeling to be 90% sure you're dead, but still 100% sure you're alive. 

For the record, I am getting treatment and everything. I'm not a danger to myself and others. I just hate this. It is maddening to know ""This is how I used to be, this is how I got to tgis point"" but to have no idea how to get back. 

I just want to be OK again.",4.693564444444449,6.011665112000003,5.622933333333336,79.48657777777778,69.88,8.648888888888889,29.355555555555554,9.049649993220411,2.4208488888888886,1527,58,290,29,27,502,190,375,0.158,0.7340000000000001,0.107,-0.9776,1,0,0,0,0,0,78.0,0,8,2,2,21,19,7,1,19,2,30,6,4,6,7,64,58,22,2,4,12,0,4,4,0,0,0,1,1,2,36,13,2,0,16,1,0,5,14,9,0,3,2,5,31,10,34,52,7,36,1,0,0,0,15,15,2,6,20,198,67,1,0.0,0.0,0.17085577116569414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760026651490602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07000691378594147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059531228613036974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793050362965084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462803489402564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14898275426282193,0.3945172151117806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954505533793725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540925926650498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05645703171416644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957681932151806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147066573166965,0.0,0.08252634447612851,0.09850853655109673,0.13279085309958175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598474705168776,0.0,0.0,0.18294730298163744,0.0,0.14925557229972305,0.0,0.07001494248293387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741266803545255,0.0,0.07841999790588883,0.08642911718578163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058677228745537914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882370901277664,0.0,0.09137059226784626,0.0,0.0,0.09685171027698196,0.0,0.24055262198101804,0.07135801452394358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107343924866686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535836788164492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06491092030706706,0.06751740914645933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715441856286723,0.0,0.0996665891666145,0.0,0.0,0.17796117796570254,0.06657926299985957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06069026041448386,0.07643786975313438,0.0914622455153826,0.0,0.16551004541840755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19928280693202732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916746544385656,0.07475997107909134,0.0,0.06961652227849094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796945027232096,0.0,0.0,0.08986010183874718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483472743979072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982152566995848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002140846365836,0.0,0.0,0.16501367401364447,0.0,0.0,0.07036254959067892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522002452144164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07560775728268779,0.09641460531020396,0.0,0.05163425062208521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921227740071229,0.0,0.09571289850644553,0.0,0.11274772434321258
mentalhealth,ghghgy,2020/03/09,"Advice for a New Manic-Depressive Disorder Diagnosis I was recently diagnosed with bipolar; it runs in my family. I've also been dignosed with ADHD, PTSD, major depression, and a polysubstance dependency. I suppose I'm looking for any comments or advice as I process this.

I started reading The Unquiet Mind to better understand the illness, and it has ease some of my anxieties. Though, I fear how it will effect my relationships and stability in life. Will I slowly lose my mind and become more unstable as my life progresses? Will I burden others with my illness and be deemed too much to handle? Will I be the bipolar mom that kids talk about? Will I be a fulfilling wife?

I'm petrified that the psychological strengthening Ive done over the 10+ years will start to whether away. Suicide weighed heavily on my mind as a child, and self harm was habitual. As an adult, regardless of how depressed I become, I can't fathom self harm and suicide is out of the question. The reckless behavior and neglect of self manifests in malnutrition, sleep deprivation, and other self destructive actions. I'm committed to my recovery though. I've been doing EMDR therapy for two years and started medicine to BP this week.

Sooo for someone with bipolar...
Book recommendations?
Therapy recommendations?
Self care and routine suggestions?
How do you cope with the stigma?
How does it effect your relationships?
How do you tell your friends and family?
Do you need help from other people in your life?
How can people in my life help me?",5.205000000000002,7.9391063823529375,6.1796705882352985,70.13591764705887,71.57352941176471,9.793176470588236,33.306470588235285,10.078955797065145,4.188805117647059,1224,61,191,37,25,404,151,272,0.201,0.725,0.07400000000000001,-0.9905,0,0,0,0,0,2,39.0,0,6,0,5,12,13,1,1,13,0,23,12,1,9,1,39,33,27,2,2,2,2,0,0,1,6,10,0,0,8,11,18,1,1,4,2,0,2,1,10,0,1,5,1,28,3,33,19,4,19,0,5,1,0,26,9,0,4,8,136,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003684346211334,0.1789419580014502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322017703682866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06226366600868246,0.0,0.07004284147369999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860232558037835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20224076392100668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097702347217016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335111177299917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365804414754178,0.09293106414259276,0.0,0.0,0.1049352310802896,0.0,0.08012442077672935,0.09369725705020387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726284798447404,0.10303000226470004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073871790089585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12274093641424187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586850057975801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688700202155202,0.10243176955839664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27734727828666306,0.1072334939926752,0.0,0.0,0.06730683914081301,0.06789028139476941,0.0,0.08842882980421128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695179294854508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702826979088996,0.0,0.10256770359217524,0.0,0.09158437482196502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040405669373383,0.1966014849726807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4775831429653118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162572074087136,0.0,0.077578149835017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944190630839362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20030267787007425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359213625021628,0.08002712386286442,0.0,0.20941275846614935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17991367932987584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944042262232876,0.09531677001447138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344358632035268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179227577743529
mentalhealth,bluishhydrangea,2020/03/09,Does having a pet help you with anxiety/depression? I'm moving my cat soon to live with me after not having a pet for over a year since I moved out from my parents. I wonder if my kitty's presence will actually make me calmer or would it be hard to take care of her because of getting depressed easily?,7.135591397849468,5.5282669677419385,8.076451612903227,73.96801075268819,64.80645161290322,10.847311827956991,33.56989247311828,9.725611199111238,3.0235311827956988,240,8,47,4,3,82,50,62,0.07400000000000001,0.752,0.175,0.755,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,9,11,2,0,2,3,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,9,1,11,8,0,7,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,3,3,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.2303765009268831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439099753598066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406956119296375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4066644952944196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20659203862787626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334016939365328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114780741322672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823702705803094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20845977632770826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575828226096173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5018236806735631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621348918763073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19528482826530166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17750006422111933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560147731830293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16770189315846082,0.0,0.0,0.1520254542439093
mentalhealth,throwawayforthisday6,2020/03/09,"I have nobody to talk to about this. Throw away, I have tried to reach out to friends for several days but everyone is busy with their own lives and I have nobody.

Last fall I lost my license for a driving infraction that I was total BS but it still happened (heavy rain, couldnt tell the road from the grass, it all just looked like water. Got stuck, walked home, police serve ticket for failure to control vehicle, lost license). Losing my license also caused me to lose my very well paying job which my employer had paid for me to go to school for and graduated last spring. A career I could one day retire from happily and loved the work. Losing my job in turn cost me my apartment and most of my dignity forcing me to move back in with the parents at 32 years old. This alone was enough to bring anyone down in the pit but I kept my head up, called an old employer that is only a 5 minute drive from my parents house and got my old job back. My father agreed he would take me to and from work as he is retired has the time. This has turned into something used against me in every fashion possible. Things started off ok as my parents were actually kind of happy to have me back around to help with the land, the house( they have a decent size property in the country) and I was more than happy to help. Things have progressively gotten worse to the point they have cut me off from the rest of my family, use the fact that I cant drive against me whenever they possibly can and tell me to leave their house almost every weekend because they know I can't drive and am way out in the middle of nowhere. 7 out of 10 times I cant even find an uber so I walk to town. After I have seen our traffic light and stopped at our gas station to get something to drink there isnt much left to do but stop down at one of our 2 restaurants and sit there ALL FUCKING DAY drinking coffee until my parents go to bed at night. Well this weekend my father pushed it even further and decided assaulting me in front of my mother was appropriate before they asked me to leave. He hit me down the stairs. I almost called the cops but knew this would only make things worse so I walked to town with my leg out of socket, cracked ribs and slept outside last night. I prayed to die, I prayed god would take me last night but he didn't. I had to call off work because I physically can't do my job in this condition its hard labor. I have tried to call a few friends just to talk and haven't had anyone pick up.  I don't even know how I'm supposed to feel or what to do, im lost.",6.362044501315137,5.3162869731286015,6.2948645766688,84.30031492144737,66.0249520153551,9.330802587616413,30.42873391625791,8.167268648758528,1.851206383734984,2007,58,434,21,27,634,249,521,0.105,0.797,0.098,-0.2249,10,1,4,0,1,0,37.0,3,0,7,11,20,19,3,0,22,1,40,9,4,7,4,61,74,28,1,5,9,7,2,1,2,3,0,0,2,0,18,24,3,4,6,5,3,15,9,9,2,2,21,5,63,10,86,47,10,82,2,6,2,2,35,37,1,4,29,279,81,14,0.0,0.0,0.062127140690546916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750113377978425,0.06593698023960809,0.0,0.05091229113791233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890310711926463,0.0,0.0,0.05667469503724475,0.05951749538941323,0.0,0.05981467433369408,0.14686167416566134,0.0,0.0776182922301563,0.0,0.05417360192987141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600333378720578,0.0,0.0,0.06540073910630763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140488866953892,0.05083073661051373,0.0,0.0,0.1231745557675709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660734576199728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473348839807327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578220610879464,0.0,0.12614894331670715,0.0,0.10727978114883374,0.060833935174784665,0.0,0.0,0.0600170047398954,0.0,0.032190566178123735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05818798645600842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837370916712136,0.0588565887602477,0.03326195174371277,0.0,0.07236373990255053,0.0,0.10183625996125974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05629810085379008,0.1355435916263348,0.05703067809312365,0.0,0.06533790485154656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534563206694655,0.0,0.06386045044136003,0.0,0.0,0.22038004838740055,0.0,0.0,0.06876833295896298,0.0,0.2527078448627642,0.0,0.0,0.06629653692381259,0.0699764321091679,0.2075794983092632,0.0,0.13482253223848026,0.0691714121290959,0.0,0.0,0.031103144939454336,0.0,0.056216713944890855,0.0,0.05346194983486012,0.21367208949408364,0.2084912032442559,0.0,0.057459486382474674,0.0,0.04249639243278721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766504023982346,0.04680056138332064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792338048951138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20041481549080825,0.0,0.08628110962049157,0.09683908740674106,0.0,0.0,0.28276653637810745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060183310211021177,0.14354379011168195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443163684828919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192250014156054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802372583458907,0.0,0.0,0.045061895700829364,0.0,0.05084236568421295,0.10645235544046923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09573521099659832,0.10234185214677548,0.1112907505532684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268871298599084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074246291860797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644771621465662,0.13849688119142084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997097123381057,0.0,0.05252968754995405,0.0,0.05053373163751496,0.0,0.0,0.11448364320181804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13904503334771814,0.0,0.129758653666386,0.1356758054976296,0.0,0.0,0.04099770048748713
mentalhealth,Unrealityconcerns,2020/03/09,"Sense of unreality triggered by coronavirus news New to this subreddit, so forgive me if I break a rule. Lately I have begun questioning reality. So much in my current experience seems increasingly unlikely. It came to my attention with news of COVID19, which I have been following somewhat obsessively since mid January. We are, apparently, in a pandemic of epic proportions. I live minutes from “ground zero”. Hand sanitizer and rubbing alcohol have disappeared from store shelves. The news is full of people in isolation and people who have died, whole countries in disaster mode, schools closing, events cancelled, and on and on. Yet, I rarely see anyone coughing or ill. No one I know is personally affected by the illness. If not for the media, I would not know anything is going on. Part of me wonders if it is all an elaborate hoax.  I suppose I have been primed for this perception because everything about our current POTUS and political news has felt unreal and downright impossible. Like a dream that I realize cannot be real, at which point I would typically awaken. But I must still be dreaming. The world seems to be falling appart, what with Climate change, escalating tensions and breakdown of relations between long time allies. Our government seemingly throwing out all semblance of decency and honor.

All this and more has me questioning reality, my mental health, everything.

Am I the only one experiencing this? 

What should I do?",6.9335887096774185,9.481617439516134,7.469387096774195,63.59658064516131,66.13709677419354,11.250322580645161,39.012903225806454,11.10651602901591,5.477755806451615,1167,66,168,39,20,383,163,248,0.133,0.8140000000000001,0.053,-0.9395,3,1,1,1,0,0,35.0,3,0,0,1,5,5,0,2,9,0,24,6,1,2,4,50,35,16,1,7,7,0,3,1,0,4,5,0,0,1,12,15,1,0,13,2,1,7,4,2,0,3,4,5,23,3,29,24,10,33,0,0,1,0,8,15,0,11,11,130,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539000769601133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069329743004182,0.0,0.11850579056504475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778555262613286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16470606071624025,0.0,0.0,0.15234069669420436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945690827336053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588490667006101,0.1408668350950198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13826965306201505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184270376115113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15307309412264522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15828536256101036,0.0,0.1624465794069014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035472408551363,0.0,0.12716114098063389,0.12744198572446347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512555228262258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586198243232804,0.0,0.0,0.13908320977100136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951662339277301,0.10952408974167438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15594594208062956,0.0,0.19967314832233987,0.1257416758506678,0.0,0.0,0.1361335065213361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226424112141996,0.0,0.0,0.16391190775453734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574314081947384,0.11475522462057325,0.3932966876575367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912437984863256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500446712159205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397185217776452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607790793991488,0.0,0.0,0.1561698435993429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20459739959730275,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TiPtoeThroughTulips,2020/03/09,"Should I be mad if my caseworker is consistently 30 minutes to an hour and a half late? What should I do? She’s pissing me off. I really want this service. I want help. I want to grow as a person and I accidentally ended up in this program called mental health skill building because of a wrong phone call. I have a therapist and a case workerish person work together and the case workerish person is supposed to teach me life skills, monitor me, I guess be there to talk to???? I’m not really sure what’s she supposed to do, but I’m pretty positive she should be showing up on time more consistently. Like I know for a fact she’s been late several times by like a lot and we haven’t been doing this that long and today I’m not sure if she was supposed to show up at 9 or 10 so either way I was fine, but still she showed up at like 10:30 and that’s not the latest she’s been. We went to the grocery store after and I basically reverted to how I used to act because I don’t know how to deal with this. Like am I allowed to get mad? I’m so bad at expressing my feelings because my bio father and foster parents would get abusive if I did, but then I would act pissy and they would get abusive anyway like I don’t know how to say something. Also, she’s makes me self conscious because she doesn’t pay a lot of compliments like when I wrote a cover letter and got an interview she was like meh but she’ll agree when my apartment looks like garbage. I really need this service because my life is a fucking mess. I just acted so childish in a grocery store and I’m fucking 21 and hate myself.",2.8063759644610715,4.218722811550158,4.408829787234044,85.99134615384617,74.6838905775076,7.371568856675237,26.331657703998125,8.012643519586192,1.5281394902969372,1251,45,262,19,26,420,160,329,0.14,0.7120000000000001,0.14800000000000002,-0.3219,3,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,2,0,1,3,13,21,6,0,16,0,29,6,1,6,3,57,55,32,0,13,13,2,1,8,0,7,3,1,0,4,9,16,0,0,5,3,3,5,7,9,0,1,10,3,44,12,31,35,4,32,0,0,1,2,31,12,3,7,22,171,53,7,0.0,0.234946369176615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928795657044876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827837461361885,0.3021959749732345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20248069316129752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221637943154123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781496478149592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05013178853403867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833199233114944,0.15540091359235592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929704965774581,0.0,0.1092217864528668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978873045425498,0.0,0.10538880610017806,0.0,0.0,0.0664562585729179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763999144135252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16346607624661802,0.0,0.22368465414351896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006115756035584,0.387506395810566,0.0,0.0,0.08774212607067307,0.08325865251664878,0.0,0.0,0.16858275794841385,0.0,0.0,0.06618150631807816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999170283801817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351637076862724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009119976152648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597144554545927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086831663097212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905486490345168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884580959932454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034321222117934,0.11200808174621038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632833588055621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791790585772104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18689007001121985,0.0,0.0,0.07969074016303991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151175069248712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115627025085737,0.0,0.09397992482853083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563132198840955,0.0,0.0,0.17543871024180313,0.07869840916340845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191042053166383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218032109081353,0.0,0.0,0.2112939161354313,0.10840186675297768,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,karna852,2020/03/09,"Creating an online mental health service - help me test it out! Hey Everyone,

**tl;dr – if you are like me, I want to arrange free online therapy for you (with a small catch).**

**About Me**

My name is Prakash. I’ve had depression since I was 12, ended up getting hospitalized for it and then spent significant time figuring out how to manage it with a therapist.

I've grown up in Hong Kong and spent significant time in New York. One thing I've noticed is that the cost of therapy the world over is quite high (either in terms of price or in terms of time taken to find a solid therapist).

Specifically, when I moved insurance providers in the states my therapist went from in network to out of network...and my co-pay went up from 20 dollars an hour to 80. I could not afford this and basically struggled alone for a couple of years, until I moved to India..where the cost of therapy was a LOT lower.

Existing providers like TalkSpace and Betterment are still quite expensive and I believe that expense is the biggest issue when it comes to finding a therapist.

**What I’m trying to do**

After having gone through the above, I wanted to work on getting more people access to mental health. As a result, I'm running this experiment to see if people can get value from teletherapy with a therapist sitting in India (because it's a lot cheaper over here).

So here’s what I’m proposing -

Go to this website [www.talkfreely.uk](https://www.talkfreely.uk/) and sign up.

I’ll reach out to you via email and schedule a weekly online session with a therapist.

For the first 5 weeks, this service will be free, after which it will cost you roughly 20 pounds per hour (or your equivalent local currency).

In return, you and I jump on a short call every week so you can help me iron out the operational kinks. I want to get feedback on what’s effective and what’s not, so that I can make the service better.

**Caveats**

If you’re facing really SERIOUS depression or another serious mental health disorder, DO NOT use this service. You need to get professional help in person. I'm also happy to talk to you in DMs (got a lot of experience dealing with the cage that is my mind).

If you’re in the US, you unfortunately **can’t use** this service because of regulation. If you’re in the UK, Singapore, HK, Dubai…you’re fine. The pricing is set in pounds, but I'm happy to convert to the currency of your choice.",3.097367375886524,5.752077835555558,4.270709219858155,81.49691489361703,78.42222222222222,7.4742316784869995,26.68557919621749,8.464757390353514,2.244762174940899,1886,77,339,41,47,615,224,450,0.037000000000000005,0.8759999999999999,0.087,0.9363,2,1,0,0,0,0,90.0,1,11,0,7,11,14,0,1,29,0,22,4,1,6,0,53,49,28,0,10,13,0,1,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,22,20,0,0,4,0,14,11,4,5,0,2,10,2,30,11,73,35,7,70,0,2,1,0,22,33,0,11,25,215,52,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725219864283675,0.0,0.05964917431850102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821356563467502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093810040878857,0.0,0.0,0.08403679316519844,0.0,0.13193665419452075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616419116425209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642522260725638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059553624499144336,0.08253183275718813,0.0,0.0,0.07689847107486801,0.12848760696856446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854859977696045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606413342700215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06284484771332785,0.07127343756523617,0.0,0.14592563367113456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634685337397476,0.06344576732005318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194849604426548,0.0,0.04239091621405768,0.0,0.05965601514493591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15880376121306275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23785536435294635,0.0,0.0,0.14998725368773574,0.07880787308605723,0.0,0.0,0.14691121128256926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785203047850868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288129734022379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19023990687079614,0.0,0.0,0.04978905218121549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22550593435740274,0.0,0.07531410429378331,0.0,0.0,0.15855361015281622,0.0,0.05530714883974944,0.0,0.07203897746818283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492060897167665,0.0,0.0,0.05054375704881541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342189727054503,0.06512865045559546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586701710959099,0.0,0.0,0.04778392614316656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059438152559241265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170118255076496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059567249198185464,0.0,0.0,0.07797711190984441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05995219270573559,0.0,0.0,0.2558986874884751,0.5196247602803388,0.04955393127162987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13048116397994178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064135573820696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972195162146313,0.12884271138636108,0.0,0.0,0.13198441052176907,0.0,0.1794935273426787,0.0,0.0,0.13829037682687048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05430202443527223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048033174865602636
mentalhealth,AlexanderTGHN,2020/03/09,I have an irrational fear of the false rape convictions. Its starting to eat me up. I ruminate exessively. I know the statistics but i constantly feel fear. Even when i am not thinking about it i feel like constantly something is wrong.i keep making up scenarios in my head. This isnt a first time i constantly make extremely unlikely scenarios in my head it is a habit i aleays had.what can i do.,1.6653999999999982,4.395799440000005,3.0528333333333366,84.30725000000002,94.6,8.9,28.91666666666667,8.841846274778883,3.633466666666667,318,17,59,12,12,103,53,75,0.152,0.8029999999999999,0.045,-0.7717,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,2,5,0,7,4,2,2,0,9,15,2,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,2,12,1,7,15,0,11,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,8,40,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5950687121359912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18782116116304048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123542434776227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4130976710188741,0.18562043476503814,0.1311307314177241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15613060184683875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.376757905967582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631508770690787,0.0,0.0,0.10087626045109066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967501929408465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450469120571216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413085320247531,0.0,0.0,0.12992018570038516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761373791331815,0.0,0.0,0.1070315826276058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20068705131442907,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hariztek,2020/03/09,Maybe you can relate too  I use headphones all the time as a coping mechanism maybe you can relate to [this](https://medium.com/@thatguywhowrites/that-guy-with-headphones-on-f056e88cb76) article as well,10.260000000000002,14.559623666666667,5.616666666666671,72.60500000000002,62.33333333333334,8.0,30.0,8.841846274778883,2.9280000000000013,170,6,22,3,3,44,24,30,0.0,0.909,0.091,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,3,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37662053747080604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7642542892649928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217935290630248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32851270000345845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34199325797078023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bboateng92,2020/03/09,"Mental Health Services In The Bronx, New York and Manhattan. Hello, everyone.

Does anyone know of a mental health program in the Bronx,NY and/or Manhattan where people can have access to basketball courts, other sports and also get classroom learning(math, science, etc.) from teachers for free? Im trying to look for a program that could benefit someone close to me as soon as possible without going through the paperwork and long application waiting times that most long-term mental health programs go through. 

I am sorry if I do not respond to any posts right away. I will try to respond as soon as possible.",6.215659397715478,8.801822383177573,5.8092834890965745,74.58833852544134,68.1588785046729,8.493873312564899,34.31879543094496,9.150863307647796,3.5994577362409137,493,24,73,10,9,152,77,107,0.013000000000000001,0.927,0.061,0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,5,0,6,3,0,0,0,11,12,9,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,19,10,2,14,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,2,5,48,7,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186307869163666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087912913939806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372569962507268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937424002645846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844075662023085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298169913353322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16544297338621233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14174922086014502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750371121665181,0.0,0.1686148318408375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4730487784257096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16023717007254312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152608163148058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26255986184309044,0.12457174951747488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.448488126663502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327173315205902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10284317593464974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3344715469940027,0.14207271804052252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668511893090226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569154207063454,0.0,0.0,0.16605916406504914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650068413941096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014319209066336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299849556309566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Voron111999,2020/03/09,"My amygdala doesn't function properly when I'm fully awake. It is a very weird title I know. But let me explain. 

I ruined my life because of choices I made which at first wasn't a horrible choice to me but it ruined my life because I couldn't see the negatives of it. I didn't see the dangers of those choices or anything scary. At this point, I'm in a horrible situation but I'm still not scared of anything although I know I messed up. Why am i so chill in the face of danger? I keep things to the last day and even if I don't have time to do it I don't feel afraid. 

But today I realized something, in my dream, i dream a lot about my current situation in life and it scares me so much...i wake up and for a while, i feel really bad because of it and then after a while when I'm fully awake and conscious, i don't feel anything about it. I'm like... it's normal. 

WHats this problem i have? i cant live with it....

​

SUMMARY:  In my dreams, I see the choices I made in life and where I stand and I am scared of my situation but when I'm awake and fully conscious I don't feel anything bad. Not feeling anything wrong about my life choices made me do it again and again until I totally put myself in an inescapable situations.",1.6491739130434766,3.337308392307694,3.568695652173915,89.61108695652176,78.53846153846155,6.36789297658863,25.15050167224081,7.255503002510835,1.0502792642140468,962,36,211,12,23,325,114,260,0.151,0.745,0.105,-0.9329999999999999,1,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,1,13,15,2,4,12,0,17,7,2,3,1,39,38,26,0,4,9,0,5,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,16,10,0,1,11,3,0,1,12,14,0,1,5,8,36,1,28,31,2,32,0,2,3,0,1,13,0,3,18,145,52,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503092087070598,0.11778875337028355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3988534009690289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187626321760598,0.17727521695234316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251618005472905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402580472043701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450706501900471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245434433466811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616183142337194,0.0,0.0,0.1065477980106346,0.07901638376796642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912438769416966,0.3423464427803229,0.04735839631455424,0.0,0.0855969203013583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241215266675977,0.0,0.2751716710414107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125966001346118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497742681903124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163655514718834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275537174928564,0.0,0.0974482011292009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210015996805038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911517723982703,0.0,0.2317381019137199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4358438438584571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462664089660898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741380842128727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440046491353589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05652459456550656,0.0,0.09188469813679853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998296526325717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747033328642226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10598511141859274,0.11778875337028355,0.0
mentalhealth,jeanripper73,2020/03/09,"The sun is shining I live in PA and the weather today is so beautiful. There is not a single cloud in the sky and sun is so warm. My mood is incredible today and I just wanted to share this progress. I know that I should not rely on weather for good moods, but it sure makes it easier!

I hope everyone in this subreddit is doing well. And if you aren’t, that is okay too! Just know shit gets better. Have a wonderful day everyone.",0.8465909090909136,3.1537122954545467,2.9942727272727296,89.26890909090912,85.13636363636364,6.701818181818182,20.163636363636364,7.908726449838941,0.9711327272727264,334,10,71,7,10,113,59,88,0.046,0.624,0.33,0.9808,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,2,7,11,1,0,5,1,11,1,1,1,1,18,18,8,0,4,6,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,2,7,8,6,17,1,8,0,0,1,0,3,5,1,3,3,51,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21378125877193715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588908356995934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4619466907879808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628846459637247,0.0,0.0,0.20274285223053248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400820088747711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656854365339381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21344275114871186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613496463639131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481215979626239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22781777253837024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4582436538543544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257242660312802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21733486406265087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621344917735861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gay4popeyeschickensw,2020/03/09,"Had problems with starving myself in the past. I'm recovering now:) I'm in highschool. I'm a male. And keep in mind that I'm better now. Probably around last summer I got really depressed because of loneliness, a recent heartbreak and felt bad about my weight. I convinced myself that I was fat. I was 5'11 160lb, which I assume was a healthy weight but I felt bad about how I looked and felt I should starve myself as a way to seek attention and to hurt myself in a way. I was doing it in a strict way, as in I would eat one meal every 24 hours 4-5 days a week. Nobody noticed for about a month, and I had lost 24 pounds. So I kept going. I started going 24+ hours without food (I always kept track of my last meal). I was also talking to a girl at the time and we were 
talking far before. We were bestfriends but only because she had friend zoned the hell out of me. That was one of the reasons I did what I had done. -10 pounds(I'm not sure of the actual number) later and I think 1 or 2 weeks passed. The girl got a boyfriend, and admittedly, I got really jealous. I told her how I felt and she started gloating about her boyfriend and made me feel like shit. She was really toxic and for some reason I still liked her after that. I told my cousin, because I was too afraid to tell my parents of what I was doing. And she sorta talked me out of it. I was 6'1 126lb. I was at an unhealthy weight. Even if I didn't feel hungry I'd try force food down my throat. Sometimes I felt really hungry, while sometimes I wouldn't have an appetite at all. A few months later I was about 138lb, and I started talking to that girl's friend, and caught feelings. I was still friends with that bitch of a human being and she tried ruining my chances with the girl. She lost 2 close friends. I blocked her on social media and she tried saying sorry a few times but that didn't work. A few weeks pass and now we're dating. I'm 141lb, and still 6'1. I haven't been growing, but I'm still tall enough. Present day, and life's going good. My grades are going good, except science but I'm pushing through it. I take higher level classes (academic), and once in a while I work out. My girlfriend and I had our first kiss yesterday. I also met her parents. She knows what I have done and I consider her my bestfriend. That toxic girl is out of my life and she's jealous, I'm sure. She's still trying to ruin our relationship but my girlfriend isn't listening to her. She's not our problem. I've gone a while without starving myself. I thank my cousin for talking me out of it. I probably would've died of starvation one day if I didn't come out. I went from downhill to back at the top. She sat with me in the dark until the light came. Life's going good:).
Moral of the story: Don't give up. Don't damage your body, because you only live once, people care about you, and sometimes you have to step out of your comfort zone. 
""If you have light on light, you have nothing. If you have dark on dark, you basically have nothing. Just like in life. You gotta have a little sadness once in a while so you know when the good times come."" - Bob Ross
I wanted to share that with you guys. Hope everyone has a great day! :)",1.1655398871877516,3.3138622678843213,2.5643896051571358,93.88584307010477,82.33333333333334,5.082361894529502,20.620668815471394,6.2272716619740125,0.07811829170024165,2478,72,537,20,68,801,270,657,0.139,0.74,0.121,-0.9096,2,0,0,0,0,2,94.0,5,12,0,7,27,41,5,1,33,0,48,17,4,5,3,96,104,49,1,11,17,4,11,3,6,4,5,2,0,8,17,43,9,4,16,0,0,16,12,19,0,4,48,17,104,22,73,51,6,96,2,9,1,1,70,33,3,9,47,345,121,6,0.0,0.0,0.05685595750253269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318526586349593,0.04847920541737208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05186612512165529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04480039379624495,0.09729378491451793,0.1420655216192304,0.0,0.049577237497951517,0.0,0.0,0.05152859339095335,0.0,0.0647166875221313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666369685258883,0.05940267096625845,0.0,0.0,0.10037625561962288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029839841918327,0.0,0.05018154883250585,0.0,0.06046744879501871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924587131921165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059617252584545886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020090854613496,0.0,0.03848194138924013,0.0,0.049088808933445575,0.05567247413231851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837806354498871,0.041622860215098416,0.2797064807181832,0.0,0.0,0.04955819391618052,0.14090289393211214,0.0,0.18005436482684925,0.0,0.0,0.055890858156381534,0.16556007869076791,0.1954718398707571,0.13979392913189176,0.0642347949244568,0.0,0.057689199360108315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05786797349242325,0.11475397973319727,0.0,0.06237138894504628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05178653452777965,0.0,0.0,0.0640392750407566,0.0949836979707027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16461057604396884,0.08539258690566802,0.058394497460078264,0.05144700147884135,0.0,0.0489259655929384,0.0,0.1272011647893847,0.0,0.0,0.055129543279366686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05882868381725845,0.0,0.09300940824849573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118091987146349,0.06633243137668404,0.0,0.1861435133320205,0.11844087094612872,0.08862276578293385,0.0,0.0,0.1293875912906633,0.0,0.05561830723271435,0.04039199663436804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563401628485046,0.11149900558934599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14929822290168884,0.11980744851447568,0.057527353791474965,0.06255229906478675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046332810476755436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059805789367949815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059391450772583884,0.0,0.0,0.17286979927004129,0.06522028452605935,0.12371584456355385,0.0,0.23264320154924475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982374634519053,0.0,0.043806273936141435,0.23414661980705456,0.0509241380944832,0.053640434995190917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03733236381444892,0.0,0.0,0.10192028720067316,0.0,0.0,0.11134494826463702,0.0,0.15822610294503334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034364829926609546,0.13873857704499729,0.1402043888897247,0.212844693317616,0.0,0.054010075068960335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232626178667464,0.0,0.08483182947190303,0.0,0.0,0.08277625254441986,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Why-Do-Eye-Exist,2020/03/09,DO ii Haveve parannoiaa? I wass going tooo ask my felllow redditors whty evryone stares at mee and sommebody said itsss parinoia? Is ittt truee?,4.779466666666671,8.166425080000002,4.18,79.93666666666667,78.2,8.133333333333335,32.333333333333336,8.841846274778883,3.5987333333333336,117,6,18,3,3,35,25,25,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6448418019976304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3920121649335131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6561291892154998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,izzyg800,2020/03/09,"I’m afraid of becoming an orphan My mom’s health has been declining recently. I know she isn’t at risk of death but my brain is telling me that she will die and I’ll be just as I was before. Scared, broken, and alone.",1.48117021276596,2.9486757872340448,3.052074468085109,94.10875,78.36170212765958,7.253191489361702,20.26063829787234,8.07648339933343,0.5759829787234043,170,4,41,3,4,56,39,47,0.36200000000000004,0.638,0.0,-0.9631,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,7,2,1,0,0,5,9,4,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,7,0,4,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139257382477656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3347560532291393,0.25792033419752713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383658215753577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145755065906503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221868208390626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657877741737592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.354993330988204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992799733145614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30346133969635664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649274420865589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shrubrush,2020/03/09,"feeling guilty and run-down, work burnout feels like i can’t get up and do anything; keep having quick bursts of energy then tell myself that because i didn’t feel emotionally well enough to go to class today (it’s a three hour, two on one language class), i have to keep feeling guilty and stay lying down rather than getting up and doing something now that i feel less stressed about the class itself.  wish i could just give my brain itself a cold shower or a wake up slap but instead i’m just slow and exhausted - my room is a mess and i’m beginning to lose my grip on keeping up with uni work; i know it’s not a big deal to feel like that at this point in the term (term ends on thursday) but at the moment it feels like the biggest deal in the world",6.307435483870967,5.205216993548387,5.9739919354838715,86.7409879032258,66.16129032258064,8.78225806451613,29.697580645161292,7.1686216300943375,1.4390161290322578,594,16,131,4,8,184,98,155,0.113,0.778,0.109,-0.5579,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,4,8,8,0,1,10,0,8,3,2,0,0,27,27,10,0,3,7,0,8,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,9,7,0,3,8,0,0,1,3,4,1,3,1,9,10,4,21,25,4,31,0,1,0,0,4,17,0,1,15,81,19,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132495020869204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389185100518752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15362939035291848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987834077999427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837602742498496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480393320956282,0.12189043785456667,0.14219820805404038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4870935117990146,0.29494718333702624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380149934508138,0.1320176068497268,0.0782125954031788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355279403518069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36696883430931576,0.0,0.0,0.07563233160257732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017024847686372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15396153475997584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325484734167223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300953460364945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594656963469937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466845677206535,0.0,0.0,0.1576432005852231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202859119340802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044763173785046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13443470512987735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373687261166667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15825616362774975,0.0,0.0,0.2003779415987736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dearjnthn,2020/03/09,"Because Ive been unstable, I hurt my girlfriend with my words and I hate myself so much Today I hurt my girlfriend so much with my words. For context, I am currently on a leave of absence from school and don't meet my girlfriend often. We went through some horrible times from my emotionalness a few months ago and we're still feeling some pain from then. I easily get angry and sad and that's been causing many issues. This morning, I had been feeling really sad and depressed. Then, my girlfriend sent a message late and so I got sad and anxious. This morning, we planned to have a video call but we weren't able to because other people were in her dorm room today (usually people are out at this time). And so I felt even sadder. So we just chatted instead but she was eating as we chatted so many times I'd wait for a while while we chatted. So I became sad from that again. Then she said she'd take a bath quickly then come back to chat but I waited for 40 minutes and she hadn't come back. Apparently she was getting ready to leave and got dressed and left before messaging me. So I got upset from that and i asked her why she didn't message immediately finishing. Then I went on a run of how I kept being disappointed that morning and how sad I was and how I felt like I couldn't trust her anymore because I feel like I would be let down again. Then I did one of the worst and brought up one time she wasn't able to go by the words she said to me (saying to arrive at some time but arrived an hour later). Then when she had to go, I told her to regain my trust by promising a time we'll talk again after her classes. She said we'd talk at a certain time. But then I fell asleep at that time and let her wait for 2 hours. I told hwe I was so sorry for being late. Then, realizing the pain I caused her this morning, I kept telling her how sorry I was from all the words I'd said. But at this point she was already being mostly emotionless and cold. She said how recently she'd been feeling beat up and spit out emotionally. I ask for her forgiveness but she's having so much trouble forgiving me. I'm so frustrated at myself. Why do I have to hurt the one I love so much because I'm so emotionally unstable. What do I do? I'm trying to get to her but right now she feel uncaring and cold, tired from my shit. I don't know how to make up for everything...",2.559368583162218,4.117292511293633,3.8416175564681763,89.2050957392197,75.63244353182752,6.759117043121152,24.906006160164274,7.461004344511776,1.0466148254620125,1851,62,399,23,40,606,196,487,0.188,0.7440000000000001,0.067,-0.996,2,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,8,0,0,2,32,29,3,1,15,0,41,8,3,9,2,79,84,60,0,2,9,0,7,2,4,2,3,6,3,0,12,32,1,5,11,6,0,10,7,18,0,3,36,15,80,9,52,36,11,71,0,10,0,1,63,19,1,5,44,280,92,3,0.14433362245701092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397152385784485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963787073209824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152795522207762,0.07157008493802877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13493245339046162,0.0,0.0,0.11098364648662136,0.0,0.17596887318708876,0.0,0.06140864101865445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736903829975109,0.0,0.0,0.14827038878946674,0.0,0.1243306355743764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215716876404737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384466435093519,0.0,0.16235589848966184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047665498195021264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648588765893301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18244854063595511,0.051555984361255004,0.13858291209326712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131125408748124,0.0,0.08202812381195408,0.0,0.1731551745093152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07124978534707284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14213954432594253,0.0,0.23176819202882026,0.0,0.0,0.07532340139637496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03966099212602547,0.0,0.16281461286159152,0.15282846605209022,0.07840945155701101,0.14759090786439966,0.0,0.07051411735961946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513336471415289,0.0,0.04817190687950049,0.14633163911357885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057602860211053,0.0,0.21220363949070434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670629694056922,0.0,0.1535811505712838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006276051379803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822096298575751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04623190720979404,0.0,0.0712560198191717,0.0,0.0,0.06163006247638626,0.3432358175589675,0.05738994485261485,0.0,0.07303666576541942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407819466111719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156967357290808,0.0,0.0,0.05763250866875485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05426046077336399,0.1160098984704978,0.0630769738946773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3366483838197133,0.08294513334037107,0.13681139760174346,0.13791696153917948,0.0,0.04899652767025235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948154691790464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379871403433505,0.13023864460858622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05126523212976311,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adalind_28,2020/03/09,"OVERTHINKING Overthinking is my most toxic trait. Over the past few days I’ve really had my eyes opened to how much I overthink things that people literally don’t think twice about. I feel like I lack trust within myself because I always find myself giving into that fear within my head when certain situations arise and it’s so crazy because these fears feel so real and valid in my mind when in fact they’re not. 
I’m trying to wrap my head around this because it’s literally been something that has controlled me unconsciously for a lot of my life but it’s only recently that I’ve become more aware of this. 
Does anyone have any tips? bc I do really struggle with this",6.404538461538461,6.983355261538462,6.541346153846158,77.10740384615386,65.61538461538461,9.26923076923077,27.788461538461537,9.188382445141503,2.1879230769230764,544,15,99,9,8,174,92,130,0.08900000000000001,0.8540000000000001,0.057,-0.6056,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,3,2,0,7,4,3,2,2,21,12,8,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,12,6,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,3,14,3,14,10,6,13,0,0,1,0,1,8,0,2,6,65,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030420370961194,0.0,0.0,0.11466644714077795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790206313897983,0.0,0.0,0.1501063254244115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30836504611265025,0.18622602355782314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891201258071164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087450636179208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14755929498913714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794856636598309,0.1705172863887158,0.12046117935140932,0.0,0.0,0.15411436841463194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16175434974163114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461027113335229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910032144294125,0.08237854289178269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433535250680862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17025674342647676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395409084130465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824206251596604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609655571039172,0.11689892347112513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19192491050094787,0.21604281773124293,0.0,0.1664905498294684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189534399280214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981085544236784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17627679781976646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202272192439204,0.1080440063422912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11448097791957053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ProblematicCut,2020/03/09,I have a dilemma Last Friday my psychologist told me about a program I could take place in I would get groups therapy even week and an individual session ever other week. She know I like being in groups therapy that's probably why she told me. Groups therapy has helped me in the past and I think it's really helpful. The only problem is that I will get another psychologist and I don't know if I want that. I trust my current psychologist completely I tell her every thing and I have no problem being vulnerable with her. I'm just not sure if that will happen again she also told me she finds me a nice client and that she like helping. She said that it wasn't necessary for me to take part in the groep but that she knew that I really want groups therapy. So yeah I hope some of you can give there 2 cent. Because I think it will be fine if I get another psychologist but idk I just really like it with my current psychologist.,3.1212096774193547,5.047009225806452,4.867405913978494,80.87110887096777,75.0215053763441,8.736021505376344,25.603494623655912,9.354420925462401,2.2563881720430112,740,26,148,19,16,251,98,186,0.076,0.79,0.134,0.9264,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,9,10,0,0,7,1,15,0,0,0,2,31,35,12,0,10,8,0,0,3,0,4,0,1,0,0,14,7,0,0,6,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,6,1,35,8,10,21,2,13,0,0,0,0,23,5,0,5,11,103,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127893131097853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23937466919604525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957961041038324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11967521078239507,0.0,0.0,0.09113271494675418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538939664403664,0.10324753844007532,0.09616915243526734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104323280295021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890269759766714,0.10949494547863922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093496807777654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295199620665795,0.0,0.0,0.11336828260506425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545838729940142,0.09304057205171166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167291341660112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680976842776028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360414180294475,0.10896099503465798,0.0,0.0,0.11925359331613605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230638624735582,0.21843603660134486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21936593902716298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857472248174688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757703061814164,0.0,0.17164043403446924,0.0,0.09976471838383252,0.0,0.5221230969179338,0.0,0.07583055323750072,0.1462745527726373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32720133779605337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346472501341328,0.0,0.1831148828715739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299496709974597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108286004410238,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BleuiBee,2020/03/09,"My mind is usually blank I space out a lot and have this ‘brain fog’ that I can’t quite explain. It happens a lot and I can’t focus on uni, sometimes my friends would be talking and I realise I’ve just zoned out. It’s the same feeling you get when you’re dreaming and you can’t quite see or think clearly but your body is in autopilot and at times you’re able to reply but as it happens you can’t hear them or make out what they’re saying and you also can’t remember what happened or whether you were coherent. I’m honestly kinda concerned my dudes, is this normal? When I’m in a low mood or have no energy or I’m sad (which is often) or I guess ‘numb’ and lonely I do the same thing. I just zone out, sometimes it’s on purpose and there are times when it’s not. Usually I can’t help it because I find my thoughts and emotions to be too overwhelming, especially this feeling of loneliness. When I was in year 9 I did that a lot, I could literally stare at the wall all day and have no thoughts in my head. Also is it normal to just not think? I have no thoughts in my head most of the time and when people ask questions in lectures my mind would be so surprised like how do they just do that?? It’s hard to explain. My thoughts are only present when I’m extremely anxious and stressed or I force myself to write in a journal so I can get my mind to not be blank but every other time it’s quiet which I think is really concerning. I do feel lonely a lot of the time that I just don’t want to be present.",1.6229732142857145,3.255510493750002,3.211517857142862,92.39312500000004,78.4375,6.321428571428572,24.86607142857143,7.1686216300943375,0.8968571428571428,1178,43,267,14,28,389,142,320,0.11900000000000001,0.8109999999999999,0.07,-0.9544,1,4,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,6,2,2,19,12,0,2,11,0,35,5,4,2,2,74,62,35,0,6,19,0,4,1,1,2,1,3,0,0,22,16,0,0,15,1,0,0,13,7,0,0,7,9,36,4,26,47,8,35,0,5,2,0,18,18,0,16,18,186,58,1,0.09868172026645096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578314720887146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148225526615692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225408739609084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06015546074381571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961314501464177,0.0,0.11016143582169696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878932382810136,0.0,0.0,0.06364154583683097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100365310333052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314360543218065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496893284619559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901933045534374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624125228726893,0.0,0.10311425180283572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870904034901163,0.0,0.26179175799071,0.0,0.08839943829352097,0.0,0.20255182934072966,0.0,0.111221470709263,0.0,0.06614427697321425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04821090391596181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355826787153005,0.0,0.0,0.06587081455397206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989212194185536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193374267496064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505189503125738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841347964541336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054611107106056,0.2099203129528332,0.0,0.0,0.06321803689255087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178715221019886,0.0,0.0,0.07847566475011163,0.0,0.0,0.07863655468696851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19519748925714708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303957715448976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931662875304601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555975006982187,0.18969378526055575,0.0,0.3133690521457734,0.2877105233237018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21736794645013707,0.0,0.05820503536836308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020132552082906,0.0,0.0,0.0635477924443064
mentalhealth,FoxieLoxie837,2020/03/09,"Advice on careing for someone with menthal health issues whilst also recovering. So about 2 months ago I got a call from my brother (29) who told me he was about to kill himself and that he needed my help.  

I dont want to go into everything but basically he has been really struggling for the last 5 years, made multiple attempts on his life including jumping of a bridge and overdosing on painkillers, his relationships with his wife had been totally breaking down and she has been emotionally manipulating and abusing him whilt keeping control of all thier finanaces so he has felt very trapped. He also has autims and whilst he is very high functioning, he has gotten to the point where she had made him feel that he can't cope without her help and his anxiety has stopped him from being able to leave his house or be around people.

Before he called me I had no idea that any of this was going on. Me and him have been so close for years but he has managed to keep everything hidden from his friends andf family until he basically reached breaking point. For the last 2 months, he has been in a mental health hospital and he had been slowly working on recovering and getting though the crisis point he was at and I am delighted that he is being discharged to a community care team tonight which means he will be able to be at home and get help and support workers coming to see him on a daily basis. 

I have been in the really fortunate postion that i have not be working the last few months so i have lots of free time to visit him in hospital, do his washing, help with dr's and paperwork etc and we have been working on getting him out and about again, taking his dog out for walks and spending time with friend which is all positive but I start a new job tomorrow and I am starting to get a bit worried about how im going to cope. 

I have been dealing with some pretty seriouse issues of my own.  I was in an abusive reationship for almost 10 years which ended when my husband killed himself when I was finally able to see the extent of the abuse and told him that I wanted to leave him.  This happened in Sep 2018 and I am just now starting psycology and grife councling after a pretty massive mental, emotional and psycical breakdown sep 2019 and i know that i have a pretty long way to go myself. 

My brother has told me mulitpul times now that I am basically the only reason he has to keep going and that he doesnt want to put me though anymore than i have already been though. He has aslo said that he feels like he can't do anything unless i am there with him (going outside, being with friends, going to the shops etc) and he doesnt feel like he can do those things with anyone else. So the last thing I want is for him to start feeling that I can't make time for him but I also know that I am really going to struggle when I get back into working. 

Is anyone else in a similar situation? Could really use some advice. Thanks",7.263489583333333,6.4940461475694455,7.405986111111113,76.16262500000002,64.08680555555556,10.18,34.130555555555546,9.3871,2.9661601388888887,2335,86,443,36,30,757,251,576,0.099,0.775,0.126,0.9640000000000001,1,1,0,0,1,0,30.0,1,0,0,8,27,15,2,2,22,0,68,5,0,8,3,83,120,46,2,6,9,4,5,2,3,1,5,1,1,0,21,40,0,5,10,2,3,13,9,5,0,0,28,8,61,11,74,83,12,80,0,0,2,0,71,27,0,5,39,309,82,8,0.17673037254164992,0.20939659229747545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151325830981557,0.052220270652558534,0.0,0.058989979817013476,0.0,0.06500878692627322,0.1413312150706325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0400609045570092,0.0,0.04506608375402015,0.0,0.05842301356452907,0.08238265711130498,0.12072076779873515,0.0484780127327098,0.052442500192300935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045298249189889575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05012817674198166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431459801676633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030764667016194,0.0,0.12012559551207035,0.0,0.0,0.05074585572266597,0.0,0.0,0.06607271349801988,0.04703494059773696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607337512952747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904222679989336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842369914163944,0.1325319212343535,0.052176884572737635,0.0,0.13140072129874086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588924213348616,0.0,0.05553522221063378,0.0,0.11914691534746726,0.08417080897076856,0.05656295755445475,0.06453316153567136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654144742703467,0.0,0.15389054229313792,0.0,0.2678398492492083,0.0,0.0471158078494462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05209402825918755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12523741448465106,0.0,0.0,0.15794485786439896,0.062241780587006135,0.059091657791022864,0.0,0.0,0.06797437387967993,0.0,0.0665023596348809,0.06363304314305765,0.12297372862746495,0.058459208267915126,0.15708607538513236,0.13035064828947926,0.0,0.06475092723357292,0.19207845534673545,0.0,0.12475463111352512,0.0,0.0,0.04160996288807152,0.05756102201861254,0.0,0.0,0.05213360610628846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0500832809323272,0.0,0.11148436777369886,0.03932296533512823,0.0,0.0,0.06417039532730492,0.0,0.0,0.11873509872982907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106449725664022,0.0,0.0,0.043681110632404714,0.0,0.056895765025794076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044803804031171686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04084086263041161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16706732635653307,0.0,0.0,0.17979832459067108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059220945886931185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15095733612000597,0.06056941912493265,0.0,0.06324742687138399,0.0,0.0,0.05603701837839986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388748370481824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621744781638493,0.0,0.0,0.04991435704760134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16678755641495366,0.0,0.0,0.04925150163568569,0.0,0.12317130510554618,0.0,0.0,0.06685051080353238,0.0,0.0,0.0442930819283607,0.0,0.0,0.05423652752065525,0.0,0.0,0.07827453772453223,0.0,0.17363669371305862,0.0,0.1374038686093923,0.0,0.0,0.16887344457727654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050879432842882065,0.0,0.0972140440325128,0.13898687020150344,0.04676011453394665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056787257497366427,0.0,0.17154908807853245,0.059826090670825637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380856558395328
mentalhealth,filthyrichboy,2020/03/09,"Advanced Mood Tracker I was blown away when I found the [feeling chart](http://type-a-lifestyle.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/650_Feelings-Wheel-Color_11.jpg) when I was reading [""How To Know What You Want""](https://medium.com/personal-growth/when-we-dont-know-what-we-want-48b237491bf0) article on Medium. then I made a [simple design prototype](https://mailchi.mp/5009dd77fe43/moodwheel) based on this chart but now I still don't know if this app would be useful to some of you or not

So what do you think?",9.048076923076923,13.12687015384616,5.004807692307698,76.54644230769233,65.41025641025641,6.976923076923077,28.98076923076923,8.07648339933343,2.264430769230769,424,15,59,6,8,111,59,78,0.0,0.907,0.09300000000000001,0.6542,0,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,0,3,0,1,6,1,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,3,0,14,13,8,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,1,8,0,6,7,1,9,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,5,38,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710076114039645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3380604299491471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458486324109321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3162697677519927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.475572573078308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729377009479921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885273572885913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23035598263625104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18482666360639496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491275808974926,0.0,0.0,0.34026973980566283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049061058612118,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,peccatieritvobiscum,2020/03/09,"What the fuck is wrong with me So yesterday my girlfriend planned in staying over and I was quite excited as we haven't seen each other in 10 days. Anyhow she arrives we have sex everything is amazing when all of a sudden I feel like electrocuted and don't even know where to go with my energy. Every word she says I annoying the hell out of me so eventually I get her home drove around the city aimlessly, get home smoke some cbd which kind of calms me down so by 3 am I finally go to sleep only to wake up all amped up again. Then during breakfast I suddenly fall in hole feel sad for basically kicking her out (before that I just knew I should feel bad but didn't really) so I turn on some quiet music feeling like I am about to cry (which I never do) only to start dancing around the kitchen and being all amped up again. I feel like a broke jukbox that can't decide between Shawn mendes and mackelmore with my brain on 5000 rpm. It's exhausting and I am scared of the next swing back into darkness",4.265566502463051,5.185696615763551,5.120172413793107,84.17956896551726,70.52709359605909,8.558620689655173,26.32266009852217,8.841846274778883,1.7755083743842368,795,24,164,14,14,259,132,203,0.145,0.773,0.08199999999999999,-0.9371,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,0,2,14,16,3,1,7,0,14,8,3,0,4,35,30,13,0,1,2,0,5,3,1,1,1,2,3,0,7,16,2,0,8,1,0,5,5,9,0,0,5,8,25,7,32,23,6,35,1,2,1,2,8,16,2,3,16,110,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30671602325274394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520003632235481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883515476364364,0.11817958773835327,0.0,0.0,0.12043970730220965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15800491511614406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15547451738872614,0.09128128162821332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934855185816348,0.0,0.11925315080338166,0.0,0.12720659475261933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578331724558854,0.3033475857702464,0.0,0.15504962661315452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308510062200987,0.14789711555450555,0.0,0.1608803428732453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839513595312057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739163020008322,0.0777864190403218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20744718124163555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916400405724473,0.0,0.15052888607629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21529436713067887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505447027894224,0.0,0.0,0.0906738413357664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255790790157984,0.14170575206596495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164173892532433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001824013052748,0.15086229671489318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15395435450790992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15475124672250834,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amjohn64,2020/03/09,"How do I seek help without my parents knowing? So I’m in college right now away from home for about 3 years now, but honestly I’ve been needing to see a therapist for probably years now. I have my school therapy option, but in case I don’t like it I wanted to see if anyone knew if insurance would show where I’m going? Would they easily realize?",3.8466197183098596,4.8068407042253565,5.570535211267606,80.4163661971831,71.53521126760563,9.623661971830987,29.69295774647888,9.888512548439397,2.883324507042253,274,11,55,7,5,94,52,71,0.0,0.8170000000000001,0.183,0.9143,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,1,0,14,15,6,0,6,5,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,7,2,10,11,0,11,0,0,2,0,3,5,0,3,6,35,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16239129090007445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21820207371869585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13199033752727696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15566910718220114,0.0,0.2329609392701376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763592519515582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134633064638965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17220692296829962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578808850138629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503996788579309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19833618934729128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350446095376804,0.3701388183579948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655927035864203,0.26965465569165176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698427594832954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22387615003029102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32996074896134786,0.0,0.0,0.29911667542185205
mentalhealth,effysantos,2020/03/09,"Reasons to commit suicide Is there anyone here who constantly thinks about killing himself because of different reasons, not necessarily life-altering or life problems but just small reasons like family problems, school problems. How do you cope? It’s getting hard for me and I don’t think I can last long anymore as I recently fucked up on school. I keep thinking to just do it but then think if such a reason is enough as it was my action that led to me fucking up. Even before fucking up though i already constantly think of killing myself. Is this just suicide ideation or what? Any help or story of similar instance would be appreciated so that i can think of other things right now besides doing it.",5.685307692307693,7.6589069153846205,5.727692307692312,77.15230769230772,68.30769230769229,7.969230769230768,35.307692307692314,8.548686976883017,3.1670615384615384,569,29,94,9,10,179,89,130,0.225,0.6920000000000001,0.083,-0.9749,1,0,0,0,0,4,10.0,0,1,0,0,12,9,5,0,1,0,12,4,0,6,1,29,23,13,4,5,10,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,11,1,0,1,10,0,0,2,2,8,0,0,1,1,12,1,15,20,1,15,0,0,0,3,4,6,3,4,8,72,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208209568453526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445450145312646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858108164148254,0.07655543142912995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06674188874594493,0.0,0.09316485609472944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366317894108773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11438997733266948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312871116920085,0.0,0.07231472975722993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321402695481288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3036552173052911,0.05720212127752442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807830249885907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338642112189415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973165363867779,0.2422609434261252,0.0,0.0,0.08924602296720748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15466695405770176,0.05348952107945342,0.0,0.0,0.09689201216297152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142910739288186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4502809863251872,0.1081046042090345,0.0,0.0,0.0935007811030618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22161214913084065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395206864058235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273789430366616,0.420926757275606,0.10756982488981316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777599202336055,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Temporary-Prior,2020/03/09,"Is my brain normal? I thought my brain wasn't weird but when I talked to a friend they seemed really concerned about it. Basically I told them that my brain kinda has two parts, one which is unfiltered and emotional which I try to ignore or drown out, and another that is unemotional and reasonable which I try to let control what happens, I am still able to feel stuff but if the part of my brain that is illogical becomes too pervasive the part of the brain that is more logical will try to shut it down. However the logical part of the brain isn't that logical at times as it procrastinates a lot and often suggests self harm as a ""more practical alternative"" to emotion. The self harm part I realise is bad and I try to let the emotional side lead more in those times, however the logical brain is often pervasive then. Overall though the logical side is helpful in providing unbiased judgement and processing information. I thought that everyone's brain worked like this other than the self harm thing, but when I asked my friends if their brain sort of did the filter two part thing and they all seemed confused. Is my brain normal?",6.973293607800647,7.624309492957746,6.865727699530518,75.02151679306611,64.39906103286384,11.436475261827376,34.694474539544956,11.20814326018867,4.022113326110508,914,39,168,26,13,290,108,213,0.136,0.777,0.087,-0.9359999999999999,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,4,3,8,10,0,1,14,0,17,10,10,3,1,38,25,19,1,4,6,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,3,19,8,0,2,12,0,0,1,2,7,0,3,5,1,20,3,20,17,11,15,0,0,0,0,15,8,0,11,7,125,39,3,0.06522981400918458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839914748088671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060981070720956224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05446417004651774,0.0,0.07204120472693425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7281804522896012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316078301496699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22012428320218336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06232988264804374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032982153899657564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079278498789246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057682509103552965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04372216934488923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334038085590063,0.0,0.031867992239713705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05545605523038543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12782273625623944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0442014101334788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4238251918378537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0417878891591314,0.06706711281162367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876554562696105,0.2041467663162225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05209261372852059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467253094424585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05242925363914319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866715799440108,0.0,0.06408796107416853,0.1035703721647252,0.07607205822604855,0.0,0.0,0.06232988264804374,0.0,0.17714704765916067,0.0,0.12744010004858242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0474880814820217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,intenseskill,2020/03/09,Depression at certain times of year. I get depressed when it starts getting dark earlier and also i will get depressed when it starts getting dark later. It seems to last for a while until i get used to it but it always happens and was wondering if this is a common thing?,3.1543396226415084,5.482050094339627,4.12890566037736,84.34015094339625,76.35849056603773,6.504150943396226,27.581132075471697,7.554174236665415,1.788829433962265,217,9,39,3,5,70,37,53,0.127,0.843,0.03,-0.6249,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,1,8,14,9,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,1,6,12,0,12,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,3,11,29,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16961347945016514,0.17648126311867754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5480351656117735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.55405828754321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18755621793529845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288694038233732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19308467076931374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30024596220721217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14090747775545578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236751638682847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18318326137547186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300095865165101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13658318008714082
mentalhealth,throwawayopossum5,2020/03/09,"Scary intrusive thoughts For around a year I have had really scary thoughts just pop up in my mind constantly. They’re dumb things like my mom is gonna fall down the stairs and break her neck, that car is gonna shoot me, I’m in a simulation, theres an invisible man watching me, blah blah blah. I also get really vivid images in my head that correspond with the scary thoughts. I’m diagnosed with anxiety and depression. This doesn’t seem normal for those though. I have a therapist and med provider but they just kinda ignored me when I told them twice.",2.84242424242424,5.3583975185185215,3.316868686868688,88.76954545454547,78.44444444444444,8.001346801346802,23.707070707070702,8.841846274778883,1.7835444444444448,444,15,91,11,11,138,75,108,0.195,0.7879999999999999,0.017,-0.9101,0,0,0,1,0,1,10.0,0,0,2,0,7,4,1,0,6,0,6,3,2,0,0,17,16,7,0,1,3,1,0,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,4,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,5,2,13,1,10,9,0,13,0,1,2,0,6,7,1,2,4,51,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16555770883021426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583734541984376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18429602065247194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22372033089884608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17831021188330815,0.21012587897544527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816194672900048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21246723699168707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114189125061017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299579533300913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20903609634058565,0.2424650184382399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20284041103902534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652508579224751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18846766074506527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403718233776665,0.1375381204952631,0.0,0.20340087761660394,0.4930638510016767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19782112927075224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333172247469602
mentalhealth,fedbac09317,2020/03/09,"Wondering if this is bipolar  I have been in therapy for Depression, Psychosis and OCD for the past 3 years, my new therapist suggested that I might have bipolar II because I told here that I experience certain highs from time to time.

So here are my symptoms while depressed: I don't talk a lot of I do really quiet, I lose my motivation and interests, suicidal thoughts, self harm (punching walls, pinching my skin, alcohol), feeling agressive and empty, overthinking, lack of sleep/too much sleep

Here are the symptoms while I experience those highs: I'm thinking everything I'm doing is right, I act really hyperactive, I talk too much, I feel the need to talk so much, I drink a lot of alcohol, I have to move and do a lot of sport (I once stood up in class to do push ups while having one of those phases), I move really agressive sometimes, I get really stupid but creative Ideas.

I should add that when I was 15 I had a phase where I seriously believed I was the antichrist or something and did other drugs besides alcohol which resulted into some kind of psychosis with paranoid schizophrenic symptoms (they dissapeared after 8 months or so)

I'm not sure whether this is Bipolar, BPD, high functioning depression or maybe something completely different.",9.690750297737196,8.63391162008734,9.224287415641124,66.00847558554985,59.436681222707435,13.218102421595875,43.088924176260434,12.24349002098031,5.461302183406113,1007,51,168,28,11,324,135,229,0.131,0.8220000000000001,0.047,-0.9492,1,0,7,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,1,2,10,11,1,0,8,0,21,14,2,2,2,33,33,18,1,4,7,0,3,0,0,2,11,1,0,1,9,8,4,0,7,2,0,4,2,7,0,1,8,4,26,4,20,23,8,26,0,4,0,0,7,11,0,10,11,117,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30874433647698285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058703224267706924,0.0,0.0,0.1084964540437834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128573112671773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096809534299518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488276126372993,0.0,0.0,0.10061238330995838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433675661676907,0.11167673828136132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654769696972363,0.1883985955566756,0.0,0.0,0.09738374660733264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0503124651854733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052368299119235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10871030811979164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028101271980397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773440322655822,0.0,0.24561093463581396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674569715818726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215845202575488,0.0,0.0,0.07686526736659065,0.20470205762854984,0.2123734319683155,0.07140478957340274,0.0,0.09300656669363032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255572484735664,0.0652549699637745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919286798276972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467674622772533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223916681759019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046128290129537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927379051787919,0.0,0.0,0.14827197548127533,0.09524257520987928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533592047685683,0.0,0.09076105079036703,0.3002758666201619,0.0,0.2322054451055229,0.0,0.0,0.11012676369178567,0.11181103300182198,0.0,0.06170477116374645,0.0,0.07645097186194877,0.11230591647716318,0.0,0.0,0.09201820954945113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443259828537912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620136603634828
mentalhealth,LostInTheWorldPrt2,2020/03/09,"Why do I get suicidal everytime I face a problem or stress? Hello!
Everytime I face stress or a problematic situation my first reaction is to try to commit suicide. This behavior is not normal. Since it could be the smallest problem, I would present this ideas instead of looking for solutions.",3.751016483516484,7.014844596153848,5.234065934065934,70.76807692307693,83.80769230769229,9.125274725274727,36.27472527472528,9.23628265651192,4.8843648351648365,237,15,35,8,7,79,40,52,0.36200000000000004,0.5770000000000001,0.061,-0.9652,0,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,2,3,0,6,2,2,0,1,10,8,2,2,5,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,1,5,0,4,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,2,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17023127935036927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813567894665031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139371523196276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406887649180707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17904316804787535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20890107536088973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4080274135210036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17636997464693874,0.2396575973913716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4884639415923079,0.0,0.0,0.4664354841703741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475597157778358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923893634276437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15145866121468046,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FriendWithFeet,2020/03/09,"What's wrong with me? I've been going through this for about 2 years now. I just can't seem to be happy, and I don't know what to do. I've gone out with friends more often, tried picking up some new hobbies, exercising, and nothing seems to work, and for some reason venting only makes me feel worse.  I went to the doctors about it, and they said it was from being tired and not getting enough sleep, which I don't. I got some medication to help me sleep but somehow after getting better sleep I feel much more exhausted than usual. I went again and they have suggested I see a psychologist, but sessions are taking months to go to and it's seemingly getting worse. I just don't like myself. I can't feel happy, and if I do it only lasts for a few seconds before completely going away. It's like I'm being forced to feel this way. I have people who support me in life, and nothing that I know of is wrong with my life, so what's wrong with me? What can I do to be happy?",3.0555223880597002,4.194209477611938,4.253910447761196,88.43101492537315,73.62686567164178,6.753034825870648,24.3452736318408,7.0316486544052195,0.807171542288557,759,22,163,7,15,249,108,201,0.152,0.735,0.113,-0.8079,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,2,9,12,0,0,3,0,19,10,3,3,0,37,44,13,0,1,6,0,4,2,1,0,7,1,0,0,14,14,0,0,10,1,0,6,6,4,0,1,7,6,23,8,27,33,8,19,0,0,1,0,7,4,0,9,10,115,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151638812834064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09194246162977322,0.0,0.0,0.09556130917701232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328820894375953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059359696481974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164437559291604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21853299690164008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347904383564027,0.0,0.16935475654101145,0.0,0.18422165433978194,0.0,0.0864173332625029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3450632142311251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07242353491412568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876274043055628,0.08807504660264846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15263760483228642,0.10557539496314024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212411195610152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884885352682712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624435709481162,0.0,0.07942906998888598,0.0,0.0,0.10435521562466203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20735348481449312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435355525524087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490815923050896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110932384893204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027801477524724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610173887310789,0.29509356817795346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243836382042685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261368603372699,0.0,0.0,0.08124003804535172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418740446001475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733587535986317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900164140669645,0.0,0.0,0.08576493931686599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20032658152258845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866157555194743,0.0,0.22022405029107586,0.0,0.3544066375445955,0.0,0.06958055897518697
mentalhealth,jinxedflames,2020/03/09,"Having a voice in your head for most of your life???? Hey so uhhh I feel I should preface this by saying I’m not looking for a full on diagnosis. I’m just curious to hear what others think of it.

So I’ll start by explaining who this voice is. Ever since I was a kid, probably 11 or so, I’ve had this voice in my head. The first time I recollect him appearing was when my parents were fighting in the next room over while I was in the closet. While I couldn’t see him, I visualized him holding me close and protecting me. Ever since he appears for three situations, when I’m under high levels of stress, when I try to sleep, and when I haven’t been able to sleep. I’ve even had full on conversations with him before, talking about our relationship. He’s put some negative thoughts in my head before, of hurting others, but I’m pretty sure he’s doing it out of protection.

Interesting details about him: I’m female, but the voice has always presented male. I feel it’s part of the reason I feel so strange about my gender identity. I was an only child so I think he’s meant to be an older brother to me, if I were to give him a role. He’s separate from me, I think.

Anyway, if anyone has anything to share, I’d love to hear it! I’m really nervous to bring it up to my therapist, because despite everything I care about him and he’s helped me through so much and I’m afraid she’ll say he’s not good to have around

(Sorry if this seems rambling. This was very spur of the moment and it feels weird bringing him up. If anyone wants more info, I’m happy to share!)",3.1090476190476184,4.253368822981368,4.703990683229815,85.23385351966873,73.50310559006212,7.8511387163561075,25.217908902691512,8.344100000000001,1.4705337474120084,1219,38,259,20,24,411,166,322,0.07200000000000001,0.8390000000000001,0.08900000000000001,0.8873,1,0,0,0,2,0,40.0,1,2,0,1,20,14,1,3,12,0,21,7,5,1,3,44,53,24,0,7,10,2,4,0,0,2,1,8,2,3,15,9,0,3,14,0,0,5,5,6,0,2,12,14,38,8,44,37,7,39,0,1,2,1,41,19,0,10,15,170,53,0,0.11517016269144455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583080144865416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161059311187042,0.0,0.09477523076122606,0.10252586228781947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07020666220590226,0.0,0.1960026515342381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742365655290532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606880626202557,0.20835601154132274,0.0,0.0,0.1035075160121103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329339789319633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796368155063784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048171447256837,0.0,0.09659926825422516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260077976551595,0.0,0.0,0.354593440542489,0.0,0.25961028733145003,0.0,0.0771961323692379,0.1216836001642217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329204116715313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134809189532127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671393031413923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394556837239284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466332122697283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248477459936005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759209849313662,0.0,0.0,0.1278828361990024,0.12471806294441115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716945987807866,0.12417291461501764,0.0,0.0,0.11577782371728527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378095532069992,0.11841410881031453,0.0,0.12364965350043387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831758719281732,0.0,0.0,0.09177570853385117,0.10484659062548714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19053989742797064,0.12945608830584024,0.2305066744111436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12892356801297436,0.08151803393057865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319270322436881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854651535379696,0.0,0.0,0.09256941420315748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13372143562428104,0.0,0.22138916965598893,0.0,0.0914322445449969,0.06715664803929566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819298049946125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502744581562372,0.06793034591143683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ravenjtl,2020/03/09,"I have no idea what’s wrong, yet would really like to identify/solve it. (21 Male) Hey, so over the past 3-4 years my mentality has remained generally in tact. Though, things seem different now. I used to be very energetic; almost high on life. But now I find it very hard to rekindle that feeling. One of the main points I go to is my empathy. Some days, I feel for all that are around me. I feel selfless and get a great sense of satisfaction when I’ve gone above and beyond morally. Other days, I feel very paranoid and selfish. It’s almost like I feel as though the ones I trust will betray me. In my past I’ve had a lot of that happen. In my youth, my mother went down a deep spiral of OCD and anxiety. Her episodes would terrify me and I wanted to be away from her due to the fear and her not letting me live a normal childhood. When my dad divorced her when I was 9, I felt good. In middle school I was about 50/50 when it came to being social. I was getting the hang of it (after not having any sort of frame-work due to my mother keeping me indoors constantly), but it always felt like a chore. Something I’d have to do to keep appearances. In late middle school and high school, I became very social. This is where I felt the pinnacle of my natural happiness; which I define as me feeling good without need from any outside stimuli if that makes sense. When I was 17, my dad was prompted to kick me out by my stepmom. I felt betrayed by him because I always looked up to him. From then I lived with my grandma and aunt, and graduated from highschool later that year. I moved back to my hometown but lived with my girlfriend for about a year. She ended up cheating on me after we had been dating for a year and a half. It was awful, but a defining moment in my life. I had never felt so alone. Because I invested a lot into it, and didn’t know how to feel myself. Surprisingly, I got over that specific feeling in about a week or two. This is where things got dicey for me. At that point I was 19, now I am 21. I continued to work and really had some bright moments mentally. I felt free. I felt content with myself. I have always believed in myself, but lately I crave for a fix to all of this uncertainty in my mind. Work kept my mind off of things. But after saving up a decent amount of money, I decided to cut my hours. From then on out, I would feel great in the mornings, and then I would get home after my shift (@ 2:30 p.m.) and feel exhausted. This cycle has continued for quite some time. I feel at my best when I am able to wake up relatively early, go through my entire day without this overwhelming sense of being tired, and go to bed at around 11:00 p.m. But back to what I was saying. When I’d get home from work, I’d nap for a long time. It was mainly due to how I felt when I was tired. I love being outside, I love exploring, and socializing. But the “me” that I am when I’m tired like this is not something I am proud of. I’m not particularly rude, but I’m just quiet and unimpressive by my standards. I feel stoic and unmotivated. So I’d seek comfort in sleeping and waking up feeling at least lukewarm. I’d wake up at 6-7 p.m. and eat. From then on out, I’d spend the rest of my night too unmotivated to really do anything that means anything to me, but I’d feel too physically awake to sleep. This brought forth a lot of nights where my mind felt hopeless. I then went to go see a doctor. They tested my levels and said that I had high red blood cell count and hemoglobin levels. Thus, they were concerned that I had Polycythemia Vera (some sort of a blood cancer). I did panic, but I also was relieved because I almost wanted my life to not be lived out to the full length. They did a second test, turns out I didn’t have it. I want to go back to the doctor, but honestly the lack of motivation coupled with the fear that I dealt with (going for my first checkup in ages and having that false alarm) has made it difficult to go about seeing what’s causing my low energy. I since have moved to a different state. And to top it all off, I lost a lot of my friends due to my roommates telling one of my friends that I stole one of his belongings in my move. Yet another example of being backstabbed. I assumed they did this because they thought the thing was mine and sold it. When confronted, they all three blamed me and told the friend who owned the item this. On the bright side, I did not steal it, and have photographs to support my claim, but come on. I was baffled that this even happened to me. So now I am a point where I virtually have no friends, and rarely reach out to family. I feel alone, but normally I overcame this through the power of self love. I no longer have this. At least at the same intensity that I used to. I don’t know what to do, and I would be forever grateful if someone could try and steer me in the right direction. I know this is long, but I tried not to leave much out. I can’t take this anymore.",3.1210861630921234,4.4227169940417115,4.310191000657735,87.45385844542747,73.69712015888777,7.336431989063567,24.9945059905338,7.868654351892744,1.1998808057880552,3851,120,824,53,77,1263,396,1007,0.10300000000000001,0.767,0.13,0.9865,3,2,2,0,1,1,135.0,1,0,6,11,43,46,4,5,41,1,72,22,7,9,5,162,151,74,0,15,28,5,25,4,5,6,11,3,4,2,55,48,1,3,36,1,5,19,17,18,0,9,50,34,136,29,147,85,25,155,1,4,6,3,41,70,0,19,69,584,191,13,0.04449705032984925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367210495922272,0.09217104906696988,0.0,0.03558427507243895,0.11107533137644827,0.0,0.0,0.06051904018634115,0.0466590370401371,0.03404012170855205,0.0,0.044129117213109324,0.0,0.0,0.0732345620541288,0.0792236174321423,0.0,0.0,0.04180644353821949,0.10264645519396452,0.0,0.10849995549754743,0.0,0.0,0.050132938106212284,0.04669690907133164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050892771427882184,0.0,0.04571072796538645,0.0,0.038330268821063884,0.0,0.04808550353983115,0.0,0.035527273930445684,0.04923513984255453,0.0,0.08609074894087439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929798937606046,0.0,0.09108923302813167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04553159118822876,0.0,0.0,0.039411179167983985,0.0,0.0,0.02938988208118896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0419478589149167,0.10014310507490376,0.33748568450308275,0.0,0.3845173174737623,0.0,0.04066949786944632,0.03784916827924107,0.0,0.0,0.13751324282054286,0.0,0.0929914889972873,0.0,0.17702089396166407,0.07464402933684787,0.07117671206337428,0.09811631015409217,0.0,0.0,0.07869718930584052,0.0473679374954133,0.0398606169841416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104073019322516,0.08926833909711934,0.0,0.04382063132668281,0.0,0.0,0.050231753622818516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910204569826762,0.0,0.0,0.0733632454886586,0.0,0.10038922185431848,0.047115951432445936,0.0,0.04550124872966721,0.09428874774626518,0.08695604463334032,0.0,0.15716684266004055,0.07875697860280413,0.03736631540857824,0.0,0.048573786804779,0.1513192038434394,0.12048097561057125,0.04210418491577002,0.02970212662043285,0.0,0.0,0.048470332566505764,0.0,0.0,0.08968512182911341,0.0,0.1347880084499226,0.0,0.0,0.14187996754020732,0.03271045188867009,0.03299399899950575,0.03431886837051925,0.0,0.0,0.08351493484341499,0.08719532340981502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060941158487913,0.0,0.0,0.05220770113699625,0.0,0.0,0.0849549389720689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619228583827094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0473280902759837,0.0,0.0,0.08551784956018191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038000237853938856,0.04232688458568221,0.03538584040312129,0.0,0.13510017155384085,0.07091677612072547,0.04050844342796061,0.04642012794011584,0.0,0.0,0.03680841985268181,0.0,0.08905837113487698,0.13607741749679794,0.03770220634609511,0.06851200654621313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05049472540040978,0.0,0.0,0.03345624412180627,0.0,0.03889238327517231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824745213571125,0.0,0.08743625205042478,0.035325687593146374,0.05189317576626981,0.15342844072087944,0.0,0.04251883846937049,0.0,0.06042115262174433,0.04840001310921658,0.04346715249796925,0.0,0.0,0.07686232936889292,0.0,0.14685890652089673,0.07873653949009701,0.0,0.03569284975390491,0.0,0.0,0.08249842290528223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578713727406144,0.0,0.12957753038976766,0.0,0.0,0.15804713935790698,0.048650539271704665,0.0,0.11461856607728599
mentalhealth,RhymesWithLasagna,2020/03/09,"What I learned as a crisis line volunteer. Let me preface my long post by saying that as a former crisis line volunteer, I have to uphold the rule and moral code of privacy and will not be sharing any specific stories of any callers. Crisis lines must uphold the privacy of the callers so that they feel safe calling in. What I can do, however, is share generalizations and typical kinds of calls. So, if any of you reading find yourself in anything I have written, please know that this means you are far from being alone. Many people call crisis lines with the same issues. And, the reason I want to share this information is that I think it can help people as it has helped me become a better, more empathetic partner, friend, teacher, and family member. Honestly, the training and the openness of the callers taught me so much that I feel like I am a better human being than I was before. I am thankful for all the callers I talked to who educated me with their personal experiences and have allowed me to become a better human being having learned from them.

I am extremely verbose, so I will be making bold headings for specific things. Feel free to read only what interests you. 

In no particular order, I learned:

1. **A surprising number of calls are made because the people are lonely or isolated**. **We can help loved ones by scheduling regular contact when convenient.**

The assumption everyone makes about crisis lines is that it is one suicidal caller after another. However, that is far from the case. Those calls, although daily, were actually few in comparison. Our callers were lonely or isolated for a long list of reasons including: 

· Not knowing how to meaningfully connect to family, 

· Having trouble making friends because of their health or mental health issues, 

· Being new to town,

· Not feeling able to talk about their problems with friends/family,

· The people in their lives not being understanding and/or being super judgemental of them,

· Being unable to leave their homes because of health or mental health conditions,

· Going through grief because of a loss (be it the loss of a loved on or a breakup),

What I learned from this is that a greater effort needs to be made to spend consistent time with those who we know are struggling, if we can and it doesn’t harm us. A weekly dinner, a weekly call, a weekly visit, etc.. are small things that can be scheduled to make them a priority and give the lonely/isolated person something to look forward to. A day they know they will have company, makes the other days easier as they are looking forward to the dinner, call, visit, etc. Those callers seemed to be better equipped to deal with their days than the ones who had no idea when and if they would have some company. 

If you are the lonely/isolated person, it is something that can be asked for. Sometimes family members or friends want to help, but don’t know how. Asking them for the minimum, a weekly call, on a time and day that generally works for them can be a more useful way to get some company than just guilting or complaining that you’re lonely. 

This suggestion doesn’t cover some of the issues callers had on the list for why they were lonely, but I will address more of those further down. 

**2.** **Many people need to talk/vent in order to get through the turbulent emotions they are feeling. Once they calm down, they might be able to come up with solutions or problem solve. We do not (and most often, cannot) solve people’s problems for them.**

The goal of a crisis line is to help people through the crisis moment. Not to give advice or solve their problems. Whatever the crisis is, which is defined by the person, it is a moment of turbulent emotions and chaotic thoughts during which one cannot effectively use their logic, among other issues. So, when someone opens up to you and is emotional, don’t step in instantly wanting to find solutions. Often, that is not what they need in that moment. They need to get through that whirlwind and calm down. Often, that can be achieved through active listening and empathy. 

In active listening, you don’t hold on to gold nuggets of things you want to say when given a chance, as this means you are, in fact, NOT listening. Rather, you let go of your own thoughts, ideas, solutions for them, etc. and listen. Then, you paraphrase to make sure you understood. You don’t parrot back (say the same thing in the same words) rather you say it with your own words and check with that person if you are correct. If not, you can ask for clarification to understand what is happening. If you manage to do this well, a person generally feels heard and understood and is more likely to calm down. At this point, that might be the most that can be done. However, then you can ask them if they want to problem solve or if they just needed to vent. This gives the power back to the person in crisis. And this is what we want, we want to empower people.

A lot of people mistakenly believe that when someone opens up to them, they need to offer that person solutions. It’s a huge disconnect. It implies to the person in crisis that their emotions are not warranted as a simple solution is available. This will often make people in crisis feel worse and get more emotional while their confidante is confused about what went wrong. If you’re not sure what someone needs in the moment, simply ask “Do you need to talk or problem solve?”

**3.** **Pain blocks other thoughts. If someone you know is in pain, you cannot expect them to simply talk about something else.**

I received a surprising number of calls from people dealing with physical pain from a variety of injuries, medical conditions, treatments, or even medications. These callers opened up and explained to me about their desperate loneliness caused by the fact that they cannot think of anything else but they pain they are in. 

Think about the most pain you’ve ever experienced. In that moment, would you have been able to focus on someone’s story about their fun weekend? Would you have been able to tell a fun, light-hearted story that is interesting to your friends or family members? If you’ve never experienced the kind of pain that blocks out your ability to think of anything else but the pain, count yourself lucky and hope that you never truly understand what that means. The callers went through this kind of pain either constantly, or very often. The callers told me about how the people that loved them most lost patience with them, didn’t want to hear about their pain anymore, wanted to talk about ANYTHING else, and usually just minimized contact. Their loved ones seemed simply not to believe them that they couldn’t talk about something else. And, got annoyed that they weren’t even “trying.” But, despite their pain, they didn’t want to be alone all the time. The loneliness caused a whole other pain and desperation in them. So, they called us and we would listen to their pain because that was all they could talk about despite, themselves, wishing they could talk or think about anything else.

Personally, knowing this helped me deal with my husband before he had back surgery. I was able to sit through his constant descriptions of what hurt, what was hard to do, what he wished he could do, etc... I understood that there was no option for him. There was no ability for him to think of anything else. At times that the pain was less, he did like to be distracted. But, I couldn’t hold it against him when he was incapable. There was a lot of just being there so he wouldn’t be lonely. It hurt me that I couldn’t take the pain away and was torturous to see him like that. But, knowing that being there helped, though imperceptibly, and knowing I had to keep myself entertained with watching Netflix or reading, made it easier for me to deal with those months before his surgery. It was extremely hard on me, too. And, I also needed to give myself outlets and people to talk to and I needed my own support. But, had I not had the experience from the crisis line, I do not think I would have been quite so understanding or helpful to my partner. 

**4.** **Those positivism we were all taught to say to those going through rough times can be extremely destructive as they often cause people who need to talk to stop talking because they feel that you don’t/won’t understand.**

When we went through the crisis line training, we were taught to NEVER say things like:

“It’ll get better,” 

“It might not be as bad as you think,” 

“Why don’t you just \_\_\_\_,” 

“Just focus on the positive,” etc.. 

First and foremost, we have no real way of knowing for sure things will get better for people. A lot of people are facing a big downhill in their lives that they are aware is coming. Be it a decline in health, be it a different lifestyle after retiring/losing a job, be it their mental health issues being a long-term battle, be it their family being truly terrible people, be it financial issues, etc… We cannot predict the future when talking to someone and, therefore, cannot brush off what they are going through with some sentence that could be said to anyone experiencing anything difficult. There are people whose health will not get better. There are people whose families will never see the light. There are people who will struggle every month for the rest of their lives to pay rent and be in constant fear of homelessness. These truths are uncomfortable when listening to them for anyone. The problem with saying these ""positivisms"" to people is that they minimize what people are going through, while simultaneously demonstrating to those people that we don’t believe the depth of their struggles. It’s a fast way to shut someone up who might really need to talk. Saying those things, will often have people feel that what you are thinking is “Your problem isn’t really a big deal, and you should stop complaining,” even if that is not what you are thinking when you say those things. It takes time and effort to stop saying them because they are so ingrained in us. 

If you don’t know what to say in response to someone opening up about their really tough situation(s), here are some standbys that are more useful:

· That sucks.

· I’m so sorry you’re going through that. Is there anything I can do to actually help with that, or do you just need to vent?

· You’re going through something very hard. What do you need from me?

· That’s really hard. 

The reason these are better, is that they don’t minimize what they are going through. They don’t make the person feel they need to stop talking, if that is what they need. The harsh reality is that there are people out there with situations that will always be hard. And, they need still support to get through it. This means, they will often have to say the same things about the same situation when they need to vent. If you want to include something at all positive in these kinds of conversations, you can try asking what the most positive, or least negative thing they experienced recently was. If they had something good or fun happen. Try to do this near the end of the conversation, if it works, this could help them re-focus after venting to something actually positive. This can backfire though, so be careful about it. 

**5.** **People going through a breakup think obsessively about it and struggle to think/talk about anything else as a breakup is as painful as the death of a loved one. They can’t “just get over it.”** 

A lot of our callers were going through break-ups. And, they called us because their friends were sick of hearing them talk about their exes. After hearing so many calls about this, it’s become clear to me that they simply cannot talk or think about anything else for a quite while, longer than most of those around them think is reasonable. And, telling someone who is annoying you by obsessively talking about their ex that it’s getting old, or they should be over it by now might get them to shut up in that moment. But, it will not help them through it nor make it go faster. 

I did some research about break ups a while ago and there is evidence that they are as painful as the death of a loved one. And, it’s not necessarily just break ups for long-term relationships. Anyone who felt very connected and truly in love with someone, even in a short relationship, will suffer like someone died. And, a “reasonable” time for them to truly “get over it” is actually closer to 4 years. That doesn’t mean they will not date or whatever for so long. But, that person will be on their mind and they are likely to be destabilized in that time. Of course, lessening with time. 

So, it’s good to keep in mind that your loved ones who are again talking about their ex might not be able to talk about anything else for a longer than expected time. Yes, it can get frustrating to hear about that so often. But, rather than in a frustrated voice telling them something ultimately harmful. You can say something more constructive like:

“I know this break up is hard. And, I know it will take a long time for you to be able to even think about something else. I want to support you, however it’s been hard on me hearing about it so much. Can we take a break and try some distraction? Can we watch a movie, go on a walk, go out for dinner, etc..?” That is a much kinder way of telling someone you need a break from that topic without making them feel they don’t have your support. 

**6.** **Loved ones putting up boundaries mean they want to still be in contact with you, not that they don’t want to talk to you anymore.**

A lot of our callers were people with long-term difficulties. Many had mental health issues and were not always easy for their family/friends to be around. And, in an attempt for self-care family/friends would set up some boundaries. Callers often felt so hurt by this. For the callers, they felt it confirmed their fears of being unlovable or simply “too much” for people to handle. The flip side that many of them struggled to realize was that their loved ones were put in a position where the caller was most often the one with some issue and the relationship had become one-sided. The loved ones who were relatively doing better than the callers also had their own difficulties, trials, hard times, and needed to take care of themselves as well. The ones who put boundaries of how often they could talk were trying to respectfully give as much as they could while also taking care of themselves. A boundary is not saying “I don’t care and I don’t want to talk to you.” Rather, it is saying “I care, and this is what I can give without harming myself.” If someone sets a boundary with you, it is that person’s attempt to help you and find balance to help themselves. Remember, many of them can simply cut off contact. The fact that they haven’t chosen to do so means they want to be there. 

Some of the callers were the boundary setters calling because of the guilt they felt and being unsure if they had done the right thing. Other callers who had boundaries set on them were more understanding and respected the boundaries calling us on days that they needed support but also needed to respect their loved ones. Those who understood what the boundaries meant, seemed to fair far better and have better, more positive interactions with their loved ones. 

**7.** **The more one talks about dying by suicide, the farther along the path towards suicide they are. However, the more used to it their loved ones become and the more likely their loved ones are to think “it’s just talk.”**

This was the most heart-breaking thing I learned from the crisis line training. The first few times someone mentions any intentions of dying by suicide, their loved ones tend to freak out and worry. But, after they hear more and more of it and “nothing” happens, the more they feel it is not serious. This is terrifying because that means they might be missing some important signs as their loved one is getting closer and closer to dying by suicide. If you don’t know what to do, this is an appropriate time to call a crisis line as they will help you problem solve or find resources that you may not know of. It is also a great time for even just a one-off appointment with a mental health professional to find out what to say, do, and which signs to look for. I know these appointments are expensive, but if you can afford one, you might be able to get help that could save a life. You also likely need some support yourself. 

Some of the signs of someone being more serious about suicide include:

· A specific plan

· Access to lethal means (a gun, for example)

· Suddenly giving away their possessions

· Suddenly having energy after being low and depressed for a long time

· Suddenly cleaning or taking care of things they haven’t for a long time

·  A sudden change like a break up, getting kicked out of school, losing a job because of their depression

· Tying up lose ends like going through a list of people to pay money back to or giving back things they borrowed

· Asking questions about which medications or dosages could cause death

One thing to keep in mind if someone opens up to you about suicidal thoughts is that just in talking to you, some part of them doesn’t want to go through with it. If they were 100% serious in that exact moment, they likely would have just gone ahead with it. Sometimes in those moments they need professional help if they are very serious and sometimes, if they are just thinking about it, they need someone to be around. 

**8.** **The directors of these crisis lines are amazingly dedicated, caring, and serious people. The call-takers and all of the volunteers truly care.**

Though I only met 2 directors and this is a generalization, I don’t think crisis lines would be successful if those in charge didn’t really, truly care. Also, many callers believe that they are a burden. But, please know the people taking your calls really want to help and care about the callers. 

Not all people who want to volunteer with a crisis line actually make it through the process. They have to be vetted, interviewed, and then pass training. Many people do not make it through the application or interview, let alone the training. The group at the end of the training process when I was trained was less than half of those that showed up to the first day of training. They pick already empathetic people and then train them to make sure to follow a protocol set out to help people make it through a crisis. People come through the training with a new level empathy. 

When I went through the training it went like this: We first learned a lot of material, then we listened in on some calls and discussed what the call-taker did. We then had practice scenarios with crisis line volunteers pretending to be callers and discussed how we did and what we could do better. At this point, some of the would-be volunteers realized it was not a good fit for them or the trainers realized this and they left or were cut from the remaining training. Then we had live calls with someone there to whisper in our ears, if needed. The trainers gradually stepped back and allowed us to do more on our own. Of course, stepping in if and when needed. Once the trainers felt we had a handle on it, we were given some longer training shifts where there was someone on duty in the room to help mentor us. After all of that was passed, we managed to go through the whole process. Now, once the initial training is complete, learning is never done. Between calls we had assignments and materials to read. However, the call-takers are just empathetic people given some training. Call-takers are not mental health professionals who are qualified to give advice in the same way a counselor, psychologist, or psychiatrist would be. 

**9.** **When you do give advice, make sure it is wanted and always remember it is up to the person getting the advice to evaluate whether or not it would be useful for them.**

So, as I mentioned above, sometimes people need to vent and do not want any advice. Unwanted advice can actually grate on their nerves as it makes them feel unheard. 

So, if someone asks for advice or you check and find out they would like advice, there are things to keep in mind. 

· As much as you know about the person, you don’t know everything. It is easy to judge what is going on from the outside and think you have a viable solution, but not understand certain complexities or issues that might make your solution unworkable. 

· The easiest way to show you understand it’s up to them whether or not to take it (and remind yourself of that fact as well) is to attach “is that doable?” after. This gives the person a chance to evaluate and, if needed, reject your advice. It is their right to do so. 

· If you are interested in why your advice was rejected, you can respectfully ask something like “I would still like to help out, so it would be useful for me to know why that idea wouldn’t work for you, if you feel able to explain it.” This gives them a chance to explain, if they want to. While respecting anything they choose to do is 100% up to them. Give them the benefit of the doubt that they want the best for themselves and will take advice that suits them, their situation, and the others involved.

​

My goal in making this post was to help. So, if anything I have written was helpful, I'm glad. Also, don't be afraid to call crisis lines 24/7. They might have a lack of volunteers, meaning you might not get through every time, but the people there do care and want to help.",5.561470119855835,7.199207413376918,5.337837566004527,81.13476908892801,68.15262760875032,8.152107954069233,29.180873355125303,8.601200588015612,2.217657815774034,17021,617,3045,267,291,5257,817,3977,0.131,0.727,0.14300000000000002,0.981,18,18,12,1,0,5,553.0,37,75,158,40,167,213,10,16,214,1,399,54,3,47,31,704,728,272,16,139,147,3,28,17,7,50,31,34,5,20,276,167,3,14,124,10,10,41,90,91,3,27,108,75,344,123,559,495,93,344,1,21,7,17,531,152,1,136,151,2280,620,40,0.0974264438182562,0.0,0.06338277015542558,0.0,0.0,0.1163604362896711,0.009595851563293355,0.0,0.0,0.03363480450586569,0.011945833712826991,0.06925501504200428,0.02702220197549288,0.011729056796971364,0.013153754788318098,0.03680740149529349,0.011351124567951787,0.0,0.0,0.021471300666957682,0.0227076115984582,0.0,0.115806400654275,0.02891006353460832,0.09108057336689344,0.0,0.02034118912214817,0.049943281013840206,0.009038556786996329,0.07258809051028448,0.059777695994621675,0.02763424263089429,0.04878499527639291,0.011360338005926531,0.11488769637502592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652887788476729,0.0,0.12140669762811025,0.04448168673352753,0.011451584363808371,0.027974751540845104,0.011349974747531029,0.03509445812975824,0.0,0.08643009747443561,0.0,0.0,0.04188799758278326,0.055801325331016616,0.01864738962228832,0.0,0.04493922979181099,0.01130998862539368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03323369258829368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09947335728236564,0.060884242252612374,0.02876363717413348,0.0,0.0845104076247672,0.042899498194188604,0.009791977355865088,0.01824132908554384,0.010343904687430018,0.00972895617894292,0.02117816816069046,0.07143498483364352,0.02436263010205016,0.07662936918250064,0.007733496770054017,0.0519692580956412,0.0,0.05936400308069178,0.03683150370732748,0.0,0.0,0.05854444463563228,0.0,0.10180259153372173,0.13499824361721185,0.10458719829536614,0.02723889290281156,0.0086578696884978,0.011934777583909827,0.0,0.0,0.02871796083757072,0.0,0.07757773969543141,0.0,0.011109737654139213,0.11506639323655787,0.07320445528095608,0.02565573444770473,0.16688516749909638,0.0,0.010858518535154335,0.010751826851411116,0.0,0.0,0.034765674376360786,0.03666086542777059,0.0,0.10168789516149808,0.021484602742827062,0.03848759988460373,0.0,0.04509095504516026,0.1189845013353129,0.0,0.0,0.01146228185950768,0.011761568474940294,0.03320837988256259,0.007646130945675533,0.0899066519163576,0.0,0.03823525992298442,0.0862193369477632,0.02727122511015081,0.02422117109187588,0.011816941363017877,0.055218985687787006,0.16609220873123934,0.0307290856045651,0.13006581555484134,0.08780010875261464,0.0,0.11791773206531668,0.0,0.03271563078838608,0.06545529361644155,0.12632162976634595,0.04372130448856242,0.0,0.01728107954516447,0.0,0.0477464308244794,0.2327748593946939,0.04174515534576922,0.020910014787171083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.010387033383259678,0.0,0.011359184877264963,0.034585327670430085,0.17604981265982522,0.016466044606107132,0.18429974275138306,0.0,0.0,0.011722593835281072,0.0,0.29268732571121303,0.15123380058485444,0.0,0.02376555082232431,0.0204665512039692,0.0,0.02073502267141535,0.0,0.0,0.09322394900543032,0.0,0.03264682846723108,0.012126657129507936,0.02302778121305095,0.043312359465598346,0.01232140249201887,0.04160924977109788,0.05565033922026205,0.010688539961863223,0.034866513277348354,0.0245255930435363,0.018489255709276828,0.010297206500256258,0.1377376329518217,0.0,0.010955640277074456,0.017252502639765972,0.02956445845693718,0.011293003202257384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03650380161989959,0.0,0.0,0.1834424659698852,0.10000484836891206,0.042825441832877,0.012117880826011163,0.0,0.0,0.025934961294709125,0.0362012753330825,0.0,0.05658404034870841,0.0,0.08288677956647658,0.07370558259290898,0.051012927946724615,0.0,0.08139173431199298,0.23492305527904145,0.03784666939621937,0.009966353312479118,0.0,0.0,0.11506808920044795,0.13179018828175335,0.031906995463454345,0.034375872778807375,0.1136202857462644,0.0,0.0,0.010343904687430018,0.0,0.036747866729368285,0.0,0.0,0.09015499017145492,0.0911493458646795,0.05609677764022791,0.011922384840166977,0.035727564210077584,0.15323904212300396,0.05155505085016608,0.0347331629148917,0.0,0.029199357812714686,0.05017516082960903,0.03907209414756665,0.024171810049820296,0.024896800499861642,0.02087013670445416,0.0,0.023642537147678708,0.010993475876618137,0.011031763291639546,0.10765836726906756,0.011835613561765173,0.013153754788318098,0.0069710483963915494
mentalhealth,mrskieshasdead,2020/03/09,"Anxiety in my hands Stupid question not going to lie, but ive always read up on this and never really understood it. 

Ive dealt with severe anxiety for a couple years now and I understand my own anxiety enough to know when an attack is coming or if my anxiety is being triggered by something in particular rather than just an episode, though something thats always happened to me that i've never really understood is the feeling in my hands that I ALWAYS get. 

I keep forgetting to ask my doctor about it but I have an exam tomorrow (a known trigger for my anxiety) and was getting the feeling again today. Ive always been told that your hands go ""numb"" when your anxiety spikes but it dosen't feel like that for me. My hands ache and become really weak. they become overly sensitive in comparison to being numb. They tingle but not in a pins and needles type of way, more in an aching type of way. 

Its like when you have the flu and your bones ache, but only in my hands and times ten.

I know for a fact that its a symptom of my anxiety because ive been experiencing this feeling alongside my anxiety for years but I just wandered if anyone felt this feeling in particular as well.",6.731884447430296,6.680877882096072,7.45991266375546,72.9536378904938,64.93886462882097,10.714276116896203,33.335908632851876,10.389873798559362,3.4561875041988577,941,36,170,21,13,314,115,229,0.204,0.758,0.038,-0.9908,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,4,2,0,11,8,2,0,12,0,14,13,6,2,3,43,34,21,0,3,14,0,11,2,0,0,7,0,0,0,14,9,0,1,13,1,0,3,4,5,1,1,7,12,28,3,29,25,3,28,0,0,0,0,9,11,0,4,14,127,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3374430427314704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.62047632549592,0.0,0.0,0.07089101730030646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947816473238233,0.11534050992306845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618035886078695,0.22394438072288936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873345303998628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218099819216787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037722358292444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475820292491474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25631748032124296,0.07242973805598131,0.0973458672771822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593935644796612,0.0,0.1152392994631363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965475958308088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011598701507548,0.0,0.0,0.11143751036153952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906355417091366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15638931555559146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710815256667608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357483238191395,0.0,0.10141281958076896,0.0,0.19485021790508025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114536624877491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15610284254457715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537823297310173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961062428750196,0.0,0.059118632296340415,0.0,0.0961014886451658,0.09687807847644064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554575951727653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16094999625524045,0.0,0.0,0.09115763544236162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13057772553325364
mentalhealth,Apex_Ratel,2020/03/09,"Loneliness Do you ever feel that your are lonley, have a huge interest in meeting people. But you can't actually meet people because your vacations are going on. And given the fact that you actually have no friends.",6.083846153846152,8.156432769230772,7.331282051282053,65.65538461538463,67.46153846153847,10.328205128205127,33.51282051282051,10.504223727775694,4.259882051282052,174,8,26,5,3,59,31,39,0.11,0.705,0.185,0.5267,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,5,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,2,5,9,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,5,2,2,8,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,1,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.6858852415339733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142269888892364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178863626828002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17769234196832465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27151207396122123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19972439045836596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4872712655726333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the-king-810,2020/03/09,Fucking done I’m just fed up with my life I can’t stand waking up everyday I’m over feeling this overbearing sadness and anxiety every single day. Nothing in my life will ever go right.,2.289594594594593,4.83780491891892,4.282364864864864,80.83543918918923,80.8918918918919,6.943243243243244,28.16891891891892,8.07648339933343,2.396464864864865,150,7,26,3,4,51,31,37,0.127,0.831,0.042,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,1,5,9,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,5,6,1,10,0,1,0,1,0,5,1,0,3,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600255838914554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21920992187462796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3478397429472538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074625737745309,0.2863837295513243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718656451334496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142357155714897,0.0,0.0,0.19317524230240007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4801684102274546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32614699787741164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.290276107723263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kockerbocker,2020/03/09,"Does it make sense to have suicidal ideation since birth? As long as I could remember, it feels like I wasn’t suppose to exist or be alive. I remember nights of my younger 5 year old self would go down stairs in the kitchen and ignorantly hold a kitchen knife to my ribs and thinking about plunging it into my heart. The feeling never changed and it may even be worse now as a 20 year old, I just know how to hide it better. Would I sound dumb or crazy to say that I have genetics to basically have constant suicidal ideation?",7.855288461538464,6.352671644230771,7.158538461538463,80.78646153846154,63.32692307692307,11.012307692307694,38.107692307692304,9.888512548439397,3.383048461538462,417,18,88,7,5,129,71,104,0.195,0.722,0.083,-0.932,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,5,4,1,0,4,0,10,4,2,2,1,22,16,9,2,3,3,0,2,1,0,3,0,2,2,1,6,4,2,2,6,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,4,9,2,14,9,0,15,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,3,11,53,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333506322414778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18340652318863127,0.0,0.0,0.1873555176379512,0.0,0.13842489539472774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15172060664616024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451177933653887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17532603511325767,0.12385829852232072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853234277456804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054488228622487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528172264185036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470169570197596,0.0,0.0,0.15343038345752988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572837754125982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371658556057872,0.0,0.0,0.16269959443314091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36385333913799206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3927975035026818,0.0,0.0,0.13787382802987685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808667157210113,0.0,0.0,0.1434166234574582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37928565978631457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109094949213988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668274412351326,0.246319588447858,0.0,0.0,0.223294123982101
mentalhealth,dyerej93,2020/03/09,"How can I cope with constant sadness bc of my friend? I haven't felt like myself for the past two months and I hate it

Prepare for a long read potentially. I need to get it out somehow I suppose.

But the past two months I have felt like a completely different person. One of my extremely close friends that I game with online made a new friend that he plays with a lot more than me. And he started excluding me from the group and not inviting me. So I would start asking him if I could play, trying to insert myself into the games to have fun. And he said that I was being pushy and taking away game time from his other friends...



That's when I told him that I felt like I was being placed on the backburner and that it made me feel really shitty. Like I wasn't good enough to be included. And he told me I was overreacting. But he continued to always jump to play with his new friends. I felt like I was always hassling him when I asked to play something.



Eventually I brought up all of my feelings/insecurities about the situation again. I also mentioned how he would respond to messages from the new friends in our chat, but ignore mine. I pointed out that I can see that I was being ignored, and that it made me feel once again, shitty. Like I wasn't good enough even though I try so hard to be a good inclusive friend... After this final chat, he got very defensive and said that he didn't have to justify who he messages (which I do understand) and that he gravitates towards the new people because I always seem too needy.



So I decided it would be best to give myself space and cut off all contact with him for the past month. And it has destroyed me. The whole process, everything that he said that made me feel so little and uncared for. I opened up to him about how I struggled with self-esteem and depression and that that probably contributed to why I felt like crap when he didn't include me. His response was that he didn't have the ""mental capacity to worry how his actions made me feel"".... And I was thinking.. Well most friends generally care if they upset their friends. Intentional or not...  So that's why I decided I needed a break from it all.


Anyway, through all of it so far.. I have just felt like absolute trash. Idk why.. I just try so hard and put 100% into my friendships, am always there for my friends when they need me to vent or talk.. And I just expected the same. And I got treated like my problems weren't important. The first week that I didn't chat with him, I literally was nauseous 24/7.. Couldn't eat.. And lost 10 pounds in a week. It wasn't until this week that I finally started feeling a minuscule fragment of peace... but it always fades. And I fall right back into thinking of everything that happened.. And how I'm just not valued as a friend or person. And that kills me inside. I've always struggled with confidence, depression, and self-esteem.. And it just builds and builds.

He text me this week randomly and just said something like ""hope you're doin fine. Miss playin with ya"". Super short. And part of me does miss my friend. And want this sadness to end and just be friends again. But at the same time, I feel like he just doesn't value me as a true friend and the cycle would repeat. I lose either way.


I've lost a brother-like friend in the past and in did the same thing to me. I take things extremely personal and my brain just ingrains the negative experiences in my mind.. I'm not sure what to do with myself. I've started eating again and gained the weight back. But I don't feel like myself. I'm not actually happy at all. I fake it when I do interact with others. But in my mind, I'm jsut telling myself over and over that I'm a piece of shit that can't even keep his friends... All because of this experience. I'm not sure what I'm hoping to get out of this post.. I'm just really emotional right now and would just love to chat I suppose. Life sucks. And I hate that I can't just make my brain be normal and not care as much. But I can't. I'm a prisoner in my own mind. My mind is literally on this topic 24/7. I wake up and go to bed thinking about it and cry a lot.",2.8910710668761967,4.593023718072296,3.8868465165007855,88.6207604330365,75.07228915662652,7.173039986031082,24.43862406146325,7.9432368362626375,1.1972704731971358,3226,103,683,49,69,1040,308,830,0.17,0.6890000000000001,0.141,-0.9687,1,0,2,0,0,0,116.0,1,1,3,7,48,75,9,3,33,0,51,10,5,12,9,166,124,76,1,18,33,0,16,12,16,5,1,4,1,3,52,59,3,4,20,12,0,6,23,25,1,4,39,21,105,50,86,70,22,88,0,9,1,1,77,35,3,13,56,459,157,1,0.0,0.0,0.04134948723185496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033885305342434814,0.21154408862010332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922521102121123,0.0,0.03981039663418757,0.06516373631302876,0.0,0.051659814822567235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04446736709428019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460353731430853,0.0,0.0,0.0864032580771494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442680256044984,0.04578966317776472,0.0,0.033831025717589926,0.0,0.046544246096385015,0.0,0.0,0.07299081411589896,0.0,0.0,0.04427028630443433,0.0,0.0,0.03708049574968355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671537452985964,0.0,0.04766340489326295,0.037529494061462436,0.08756432249561848,0.0,0.05597332677267794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616341443846616,0.0828969505567993,0.0,0.0,0.14997380746346314,0.06054190282314144,0.2441057027863804,0.0928340939652734,0.0,0.036042061317490166,0.0,0.0,0.5237907150972462,0.0,0.044275807115729655,0.04064760189135444,0.024081291251225025,0.10662022990154138,0.06777838291290762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0374698976414616,0.045106357294225866,0.07591494697564481,0.08366822269218263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417098704042357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03766266091188514,0.04687893806756577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029928978471847813,0.248412995721245,0.042468417263547685,0.0,0.03749836497119779,0.0,0.04740403436209068,0.0925092667571634,0.07204723738183548,0.03824287215076348,0.20046961181039144,0.028283999823072562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042701554712952026,0.0,0.17113674747348695,0.0,0.10146407274846024,0.0,0.031148692726779764,0.09425610567788467,0.0,0.16369465468419914,0.0,0.0,0.04151609316417395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045125372760172866,0.028712730064089705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04588533220566575,0.1617975379043832,0.02937578439387869,0.1109942039823369,0.04427028630443433,0.0,0.04005574680374816,0.0,0.04058118096297123,0.0,0.04568476533022658,0.04054479873789667,0.0,0.042596106593513317,0.0,0.0,0.04238400712794422,0.0,0.05428986893182672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237183616328269,0.16122395698213504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03376542880050258,0.03857436948508591,0.08840760173327335,0.0,0.04349480393063277,0.0,0.04762851088063398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524090364958518,0.0,0.0,0.11996600907198267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859395882590612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987123595715795,0.0,0.06371775428166636,0.03405744302402265,0.03703546805692706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05630086623131664,0.08145183910472825,0.04163080592052743,0.0,0.04941553825247477,0.0,0.0,0.08097755659809386,0.0,0.08630452081270967,0.0,0.08278363022776138,0.0441113090257954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03496178353771643,0.02499242223142422,0.033633350382747444,0.13595478452104046,0.051598339120474165,0.03809800266206443,0.0,0.11470388156776636,0.04730742827624637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043031371706780695,0.0,0.15050118527745407,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wellthissucksass,2020/03/09,"The Elephant of Ego and the Black Dog of Depression [The Elephant of Ego and the Black Dog of Depression](https://medium.com/@breyon.gibbs/the-elephant-of-ego-and-the-black-dog-of-depression-4debe598cdf8)

A short article about the complex emotions and thought processes that depression can cause, even when someone else is trying to help. Do you have any similar experiences?",18.264374999999994,21.916488354166674,11.054166666666667,44.30750000000001,40.45833333333333,12.233333333333334,43.08333333333333,11.855464076750405,5.750408333333335,323,13,35,7,3,83,34,48,0.13699999999999998,0.813,0.05,-0.6908,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,0,4,0,0,1,0,6,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,6,4,0,2,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,23,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139811052728869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232447858639116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5420362318081101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628599149253261,0.3539526541307752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20783143394901352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3078000379393173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109114586385433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26661228467349984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498066609262651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21363499784619264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chuck-hardslab,2020/03/09,"Is it possible to have suicidal thoughts and not be suicidal? So as recent as last week, I all of a sudden started having vivid thoughts of myself dying. I would see a pair of scissors and a thought would pop up of “what If those were in my neck?” Or I’ll be driving and I’ll think “what if I just drove off the side of the road?”. Then I’ll think of how my parents would react and how my friends would react to my death. The weird part is I don’t want to have these thoughts. I am not depressed. I do not think I am useless or better off dead. I still go out with friends and laugh yet I don’t get the same release I normally do cause these thoughts still linger. I think I may be making it worse by constantly thinking about it. When I’m distracted and not thinking about it, I go “hey I’m not thinking about it anymore” which then I obviously start thinking them again. Sometimes it feels more like An urge rather than a thought like I want to try it but I never do and I keep telling myself I shouldn’t be having these thoughts and it’s actually scaring me that I am. I saw my doctor and she prescribed me citolapram but I haven’t started taking it yet. Is this something that will pass? Has this ever happened to anyone else? Any help is appreciated.",1.8124609375000027,3.933458636718754,2.8309437499999994,93.00468125000002,79.8203125,5.50225,25.08375,6.55674776486733,0.7346670624999998,985,38,212,9,25,313,132,256,0.079,0.812,0.109,0.6564,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,1,15,11,0,2,9,0,30,2,1,6,4,61,63,23,5,11,13,1,1,2,2,7,1,0,0,0,20,11,0,1,16,0,0,5,10,5,0,0,10,4,32,6,24,42,4,30,0,2,3,0,8,7,0,5,20,154,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.09242157122395324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440484448106219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392511587909567,0.066222196900718,0.09703977433469624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376173356925665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729144139306092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023459515465136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157206022508952,0.0,0.09829219084544699,0.0,0.0,0.09693788713457012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911657395862587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566901671219768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04788732704744494,0.06765957885315728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634268803130288,0.0,0.04948114154233072,0.0,0.10764973998638933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375017552712774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348093059696204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841810269238311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719984846550793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253931513214196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321847933660854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730448260039719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927939575114497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10516228210063217,0.1025597844733043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676929981087643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351295201611057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481946079948184,0.0,0.07547019785988715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729110229294458,0.0936688617312438,0.0,0.2011049192048641,0.0,0.15126823056876135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20719086498317496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07120880281481062,0.0,0.08277916796508186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4854816800623828,0.0,0.5263142925044829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06430067175533691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172273640874678,0.0,0.07596922986247197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651577811609252,0.26911203878134504,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VoidValkyrie,2020/03/09,"Is it worth calling my doctor to move my appointment up because of new depression symptoms? Long story short, I’ve been clean off opiates for over a month now and the majority of my withdrawal symptoms have subsided. I’m still taking a couple comfort meds for the remaining anxiety and nerve pain, but I’ve noticed depression creeping in over the last week. These last few days have felt like I’ve had all the life sucked out of me, and it hasn’t shown any sign of subsiding.

I’ve been involuntarily hospitalized in the past for a suicide attempt. I have a history of depression and anxiety as a teenager, and I still have the scars all over my arms and legs as a reminder.

At what point is it worth calling my doctor to move my next appointment up sooner? It’s currently a month away. I don’t think I’m at risk of doing anything now, but I’m worried about this progressing into something worse. The recent withdrawal from opiates complicates things as well.",6.13201465201465,7.189292769230776,6.598626373626374,74.76720695970697,66.36263736263737,10.242490842490843,34.946886446886445,10.317481424215053,3.7849326007326014,772,36,137,19,12,251,105,182,0.19399999999999998,0.727,0.079,-0.9812,1,0,1,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,2,6,9,1,1,14,0,12,8,2,0,2,15,19,11,1,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,6,0,1,0,8,8,0,0,2,0,2,2,2,6,1,0,4,1,10,3,29,15,4,33,0,3,0,0,2,15,1,0,17,89,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911287723223606,0.0,0.2050286647939402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110275637402867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259031823066445,0.0,0.0,0.08168890080773132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736705090231414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14827524809239695,0.0,0.08642287600880916,0.0,0.3462578831148576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2743219308197991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12866691198956967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184657837719845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465250164216536,0.06546863242580928,0.0,0.0,0.11859121938803947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885061504985778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21392484926669755,0.28485464451662057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12942396769308487,0.14251705305915086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525668816840386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425919839995358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792402634622418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667911949237515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231489932366386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316447562079882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21403495737281625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14658097006876986,0.0,0.0,0.27856738466276104,0.1007559420621976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902772673026048,0.08586572533004654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749164457151887,0.0,0.12048761580440387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608974275456515,0.13656370790621328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carniv0rous,2020/03/09,"my parents don’t listen. i’ve been begging them for so long to take me to a mental health screening. a therapist. something. anything so i could find out what was wrong with me. back in february of last year i had a panic attack that triggered what i believe to be dpdr. there hasn’t been a day since that i haven’t been dissociating or panicking. most days i don’t want to get out of bed. sometimes i’ll get very overstimulated and feel like my clothes are strangling me and my blanket is suffocating me to the point where i have to strip myself and lay in the cold, and just cry. i can’t do certain things because of how scared i am of being sick or getting sick or something being wrong with my body. 
months of begging. and crying. and they won’t. after giving my sister whatever treatment she wanted, taking her to the hospital, giving her ekgs, taking her to a therapist, they won’t do fucking anything for me. nothing.
my mom has taken me to a doctor ONE TIME not related to a check up. and when i asked about anti anxiety meds, my mom made them give me the smallest dose possible. of course, it didn’t work, because i have (assumed, not diagnosed) severe anxiety. since then she’s refused any kind of treatment i’ve asked for. therapist, doctor visits. she says it’s a money issue when our insurance covers a pretty big portion of the bill. i just don’t know what to do. i don’t feel like anyone takes me seriously and no one believes that there’s something wrong with me and that i’m making it up. i’ve cried to my mom, shaking and having a panic attack, and she’ll still tell me the next day i was overreacting and it’s all in my head. i can’t fucking do it anymore.",3.3238293650793658,4.9560604702381,4.715714285714284,83.41817460317463,73.76190476190476,7.120634920634919,27.027777777777786,7.793537801064563,1.6326158730158729,1322,49,257,18,27,440,168,336,0.168,0.7759999999999999,0.055999999999999994,-0.9882,1,0,3,0,0,0,39.0,1,0,4,1,13,16,4,4,16,0,33,11,2,4,2,40,57,21,0,3,7,5,2,2,0,3,7,2,1,0,13,17,0,1,5,0,3,2,14,12,0,2,9,6,46,4,35,41,3,27,0,0,1,2,27,10,2,5,17,177,59,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055687715890226516,0.0,0.12529059421549846,0.0,0.0812124493145802,0.05725909155355829,0.0,0.13477627776178555,0.0,0.15311138782849454,0.18632241626727286,0.0,0.06296802478889355,0.0,0.09983824391870176,0.0,0.0,0.18452300667062813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096085187738248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538215843811195,0.0,0.2698555430798604,0.15843599478890147,0.0,0.0,0.08311619005259778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676348902398516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281165446008054,0.11700385071296612,0.0,0.0,0.07484558366353772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15141117630994022,0.12835176178138116,0.2356678129573862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404232422896862,0.08704478385807636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547143577378248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527538591983125,0.045004366217949635,0.06675092941773753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001421525472599,0.0,0.0,0.07246969276613638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748589138755528,0.05466192403188536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096085187738248,0.0,0.0825254261902062,0.0,0.0,0.28772422490579136,0.06536347370993964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709048698906849,0.0,0.0,0.07857525123896973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109809842546382,0.0,0.0,0.19215953321447898,0.09092867679712892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741211294453554,0.09231818633479984,0.0,0.0833111327869587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512187307790984,0.08198574558189713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251190545501548,0.0,0.13547979748607727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18912777584711,0.08099087889862393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539711659118608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462830622128341,0.0,0.07157509383668018,0.0,0.0,0.28524030813190204,0.0544037917571174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047750466957435934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675674716345784,0.09660118045061612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05961658244979207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686001695195879,0.0,0.05273419839280295
mentalhealth,StonedArcticPenguin,2020/03/09,"Some thoughts of how i’ve felt for a while I’ve been dealing with anxiety for a while now.. Just constant fear of messing up, always being looked at and judged, and always feeling like I’m never going to get anything right. It can hinder my day to day activities, and sometimes ruin plans, days, or special occasions. I’m very stressed, not knowing whether or not where i’m at in life is good because i’m still here, or bad that i’m not farther ahead yet. I’m worrying too much about what people think and what work thinks of me, or what I will make of my career. But there’s this feeling that i’ve had for a very long time. This feeling I feel everyday, it’s hard to explain. It’s this feeling of knowing that I’m trapped and making decisions that I cannot change. Almost like i’m on autopilot. Where its like i’m just watching from the outside looking in. I feel like I’m a burden to everyone and that everyone is there for me out of pity. I feel like no matter how hard I try to make everyone happy, I fail and wind up disappointing myself and everyone else. This feeling that I’m always living the worst case scenario. Where I always expect the worst and no matter how hard I try to avoid that, I always can see it coming. I don’t really have optimism for anything anymore. Any obstacle i’m faced with now I tend to immediately think that I can’t get over it. I know I can, but I can’t. I feel like my life is a game of tug of war, and it’s just me vs me. I know this sounds dumb and I hate explaining this because only I know what i’m feeling exactly, but i can never really put it into words. Some days are worse than others, some days it’s non existent. Some days, it consumes me and never lets go. I can never understand it, so  I guess I just live with it.",2.9162060889929755,4.1698789071038265,4.4996604215456655,86.08389344262295,74.13661202185794,7.523653395784544,26.18618266978923,8.07648339933343,1.5129199063231855,1384,48,292,21,28,465,164,366,0.157,0.757,0.086,-0.9806,0,2,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,0,4,20,24,3,3,8,0,19,3,1,6,5,80,69,26,1,1,16,0,14,6,0,1,2,1,0,0,31,18,0,1,24,1,0,4,13,15,0,0,4,19,33,9,37,62,7,40,0,4,4,0,4,15,1,10,27,185,64,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678848385840678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190383772691201,0.0,0.0,0.05214811282308416,0.0,0.058663458703356174,0.0,0.07605045209331364,0.0,0.0,0.1262096752621601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402838287109287,0.0934923604730716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112206908755917,0.06605693602758476,0.0,0.08286873869873017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967310833066241,0.07905838746621566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640600883087834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931014343624904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629142044917451,0.3877400456110694,0.2191337859768784,0.07362917849145134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012900807557087,0.0,0.0871631758669425,0.0643193489427824,0.0,0.0,0.08447665981875419,0.0,0.0,0.08163211250878732,0.20608284056916387,0.07571010139066191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107190723795629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841513166897286,0.10832910855338378,0.22478513929961547,0.0,0.13542769709909408,0.06786339957042463,0.12879139032672707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535625659612604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05637195601028128,0.0,0.23657536064497345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05832204373208799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053163400472198113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708913719625725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825215234788016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548817313723636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061107645309742574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584296505842929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06124036800187908,0.0,0.08784187473900802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14740905922580402,0.0,0.060878954341915995,0.04471536852328229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412752991844842,0.0,0.0,0.07983130443930954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654554339833962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582725414428575,0.07787686674989028,0.07814809160645833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PureRebellion88,2020/03/09,"Touch Starvation and Lack of Interest in Sexual Relationships So, I happen to be a very touchy-feely kinda person. One of my favorite things to do is to just cuddle and watch something funny with a friend or play video games with them or something. Unfortunately, past a certain age, it seems to be extremely difficult to get this outside of romantic relationships. 

Romantic relationships are fine and all, except I don't have any desire for a sexual relationship. Like, at all. I've been exposed to so much locker room talk that I am fairly certain that anybody that's with me is settling and it seems to be a fairly common thing to fantasize about other people while having sex with your partner. For me, sexual activity is almost entirely about bonding with the other person. As a purely physical act, I can happily live without it. I find the idea of using or being used like that pretty repulsive and that's not going to change.

So, clearly, since I lack the desire for a sexual relationship, a romantic relationship is likely out of the question. The question is, what is the best way to prevent touch starvation in this situation. I don't have a lot of money, so hiring a professional cuddler or getting massages isn't an option. Many of my close friends don't live in the area, anymore, either.",7.679940227136883,8.150419949790798,8.446936640765095,64.90833682008372,62.89121338912133,11.347399880454276,35.481470412432756,11.062562989136584,4.309259175134489,1044,44,164,27,14,352,135,239,0.062,0.735,0.203,0.9871,0,0,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,1,1,7,12,0,0,18,0,22,2,0,2,6,44,30,15,0,4,9,0,2,3,3,0,0,0,1,3,15,12,0,1,6,3,1,2,6,1,0,1,1,3,13,11,35,25,8,15,0,0,1,2,17,8,0,12,7,128,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757831036749524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305790640046249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654435050402586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274396955469995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364953033903935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981915231818369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600444408691598,0.0,0.11225828232379624,0.0,0.06105646781176769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500236409207292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127841893088152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745854239136178,0.0,0.18973004933586093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133542267811423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891987525965327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897538113760923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279916432458276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255664928868484,0.07448029325250745,0.1876121445493664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929765827106494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24069837737156666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6920549563523835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19560535390356784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886942304656972,0.1207588335346396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654138514473927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635031867909368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427469976989774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855746835198972,0.0,0.08864321223239982,0.0,0.08527506077738499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035612697431136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dinggbatt,2020/03/09,"Who let me become this antisocial lol Ok I just want everybody to leave me tf alone.... does any body else feel like that sometimes?? I feel bad but I also feel like I shouldn’t feel bad. I feel like I see the worst in people and their intentions while dealing with me and I just wanna skip it all together.the more people express how they want to see me, the more I just want to push them away. My peace is undisturbed in my fortress of solitude. But I also realize I need to not let my peace be disturbed at anytime. Maybe this is just me healing.... 🤷‍♀️.",0.8856680161943302,3.2099038421052657,2.2177192982456155,94.78159919028342,85.14035087719299,5.2620782726045885,21.049932523616725,6.67199483983844,0.3077066126855605,434,14,95,5,13,139,72,114,0.134,0.665,0.201,0.6715,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,3,0,8,8,0,1,2,2,6,2,1,2,1,25,17,8,0,6,7,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,0,7,21,4,11,13,4,6,0,0,2,0,6,4,0,0,4,62,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113656489673156,0.0,0.24883856297857845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058014457380078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14617489483933707,0.0,0.2598098036264728,0.0,0.17182866494736948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728171012285471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16039874194524145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361513078255994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12996922784468445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3933359730135101,0.3334445406258383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647394196446498,0.0,0.3181873264123577,0.0,0.2280292749902837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15630354859943613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153624639147516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157226532584074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479582431429504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15387508613134224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752997960579073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justjlm,2020/03/09,"Struggling because I’m not “textbook ill” I’ve been diagnosed with OCD and depression, and I struggle mostly because my symptoms and signs are not the “textbook” signs. I feel hopeless because of it. I work out 4-5 times a week, eat healthy, get enough sleep, get ready for work and go to work each shift, and walk my dogs everyday, and live in a clean and organized environment, but still feel full on depression and hopelessness. What do you do when the lifestyle part of treatment isn’t an issue? When the “just exercise” part or the “try to just do a simple task” part of depression isn’t the issue, but just the underlying feeling? I hope this makes sense... I don’t know where else to post it.",6.253703007518798,6.602055075187973,6.065178571428572,81.18919642857145,65.9172932330827,9.657518796992482,33.91823308270676,9.516144504307137,2.971767669172932,547,23,107,10,8,171,83,133,0.168,0.743,0.08900000000000001,-0.9359,0,0,0,0,0,2,18.0,0,1,0,3,7,8,0,2,10,0,8,6,1,1,0,28,18,13,0,1,8,0,3,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,4,11,1,0,4,1,0,2,5,7,0,0,1,3,8,1,12,17,7,15,0,5,0,0,1,6,0,3,6,69,12,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26064831169136066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36827333844751,0.14466129585284598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14584008896484538,0.11906251862003285,0.0,0.0,0.1472678709184384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161968908524148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14892832288984406,0.0,0.08100103764777443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14156087435230147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975210641780909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832878205804092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585342241339226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513747874220822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4630266063431331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13650089327355164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142629330871403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382176715672193,0.0,0.0,0.2979990781788972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813950199412038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310829001269039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676606992807893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432608102798113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112827500652049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SoulShriek95,2020/03/09,"I don't know if I will be able to be successful in my adult years. I'm 17, a senior. I have a scholarship to the college I want to go to and I'm excited to go. Unfortunately, i seem to have hit a developmental roadblock, so to speak, and can't really do anything well or even converse normally. It's pretty hard to explain, but those problems, along with memory loss, lack of motivation,  and easily angered parents, have caused me to come crashing down in my mental health and education. I really need help. I don't want to keep living like this.",4.029166666666665,5.363620435185184,6.173148148148153,74.8491666666667,71.5,9.844444444444443,29.24074074074073,10.125756701596842,3.0607185185185184,429,17,83,12,8,151,73,108,0.14400000000000002,0.6509999999999999,0.205,0.6248,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,3,7,1,0,4,0,10,1,0,2,0,22,23,8,0,7,3,1,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,3,7,0,1,4,0,1,3,3,3,1,0,0,2,10,4,16,19,1,8,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,3,3,54,13,5,0.22092339643105333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18180113136943846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269491842850277,0.0,0.1903059441309585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459178197645358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511117147468725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979039694248364,0.0,0.0,0.23483123956244897,0.0,0.0,0.1480802957624033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963668655648268,0.0,0.0,0.12141372103255485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793201222442077,0.0,0.1950794065528723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22263882186511288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381189914343433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21645802202397055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24530928721539785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247585175650714,0.0,0.21139385402811686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830583696412139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20112036280833984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606126862857297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19863666522481926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226742404352608
mentalhealth,not-dan097,2020/03/09,"How to deal with random depression I'm half venting and half asking for advice.

My depression started more than a few years ago, I can't place a date on it exactly. Not gonna really go into it too much, but I never really felt I had a reason to be depressed - I just was. It got better last May. So much better. I was happy. I got my shit together, I started being hygienic again, and Iost 50 pounds. I was making improvements into my life.

But these past few months have been tough. Again, for no reason. And it comes and goes but holy shit the plows are the worst I've ever had. It sometimes just lasts a few hours sometimes a few days. Recently I've been wishing that I'd just die suddenly. Now, I'm not going to commit suicide, I've got too much to live for, but I'm not gonna lie that I've really thought it would be convenient. I've been entertaining it while I'm not in the ""lows"". Like, what if that big truck swerved and hit me head on? Imagine not having to deal with anything anymore. Just released from everything, from stress, responsibility, and the inevitable lows to come.

I don't see an underlying problem. A lot of people would kill to be where I'm standing. Still, knowing this, I am depressed. I'm starting to think there's a chemical imbalance or something.

But I can't exactly seek help. Well, I'm not sure. I'd like to see a therapist but my schedule is the worst. I could move things around to make time for it. The main thing I'm worried about is that I'm in the process of obtaining a security clearance. I'm not sure if they can see that, but I think they would if I were diagnosed with a mental illness. If that happens, I'd lose my job and I wouldn't be able to support my current lifestyle at other jobs that o would qualify for. Does anyone know if they can see this?

Also, any tips to avoid the lows would be appreciated.",1.7413305263157923,3.967801365333333,3.4256175438596514,88.07935263157896,80.68,6.614035087719299,23.73508771929825,7.7627490962704995,1.238786666666667,1452,52,301,25,38,482,192,375,0.225,0.682,0.092,-0.9956,3,1,1,0,1,2,52.0,0,0,3,4,19,28,3,2,19,0,34,6,3,5,7,71,73,24,3,14,24,0,1,2,0,9,3,0,0,0,22,15,0,2,9,1,0,5,13,17,1,2,14,5,25,11,35,42,12,45,0,8,4,0,7,15,2,9,26,196,47,3,0.08554886739435927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359736311238429,0.07583390922180831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841339834731462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058176163423827774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484148878879669,0.059817757192378425,0.0,0.07039942862965347,0.07615662939412139,0.07997664276550867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513220423106852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14738554849167895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830380943970027,0.0,0.0,0.05517194218814258,0.1763942516908456,0.2947324565231131,0.08683029961576304,0.08878621793104728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748643903604478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738384832328764,0.0,0.0,0.07688580579123674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214032855249784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723878562927424,0.0,0.20526373287910232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565058090735863,0.09106836011602074,0.0,0.0,0.08779781879545341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05734160252170871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424840187639905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16978810096422425,0.0,0.0946471466526564,0.0,0.09403084044755143,0.13946748996326616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06042569502121544,0.08358971073735914,0.0,0.0755412172371263,0.0,0.0,0.0957073000614865,0.0,0.07273058780223575,0.0,0.0,0.11420906656715404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621313702516349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828428977037455,0.09092490729938768,0.18866478274108692,0.0,0.06598056045491517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166607398403289,0.059308813044293064,0.0,0.08938035827884643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185871246949529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16441438517031595,0.17591696765029147,0.08446918585966738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27268548505641865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17562936602010346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585969765968662,0.1692200346637929,0.0,0.18165578597799453,0.0,0.06831943600911236,0.0,0.09799593856078692,0.0,0.0,0.09357657578638898,0.09707984091917396,0.16125759017984914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993288287232295,0.11366973234732478,0.10963251982887892,0.0,0.06791624480990356,0.04988423254341851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691870579347666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837697553816677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687902747981605,0.0,0.30385730440018616,0.0,0.0,0.05509066577217416
mentalhealth,gneissfungi,2020/03/09,"I’m scared to seek help For a long time I’ve felt like something is wrong with me. I don’t like talking to people about how I’m feeling. I’m terrified that if I go see someone, they will ask me questions about myself that I don’t even know the answer to. Like why am I here seeking help, or what am I feeling, or anything. I don’t know what I’m feeling, but I wish I did.",1.8297991967871496,2.462731036144582,3.595361445783133,93.9242871485944,75.98795180722891,6.015261044176707,25.88152610441768,5.46131890053228,0.4758851405622493,288,10,70,1,6,97,50,83,0.085,0.7040000000000001,0.212,0.6956,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,1,2,0,8,0,0,1,0,15,22,5,0,2,4,0,4,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,8,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,5,12,3,7,19,0,3,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,4,5,40,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18187880678678967,0.0,0.2066217956615205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14598016386252802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352597018859791,0.0,0.2122117357627298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560950172399069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962871275775605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429311912704346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.323934380104328,0.0,0.0,0.19559378649418946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532259047894194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475905037663219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22127736167809134,0.0,0.17612256099067192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18726765371762094,0.1701502904050131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177645725206827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12887724899304145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994341756736409,0.0,0.25415954751993897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24164825415987146,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DiscipleDuChrist,2020/03/09,"(Dark) My Head Feels Like It Will Explode I feel like I'm screaming inside my own head. I can't handle it. I've been constantly getting thoughts of hurting people these feelings of hurting people and animals late and thinking through it.
I've been thinking of how to harm so many people; even those close to me and I'm getting the urge to do it. I just need help. I can't stand it anymore.",0.8830379746835462,3.3779467341772182,2.128974683544307,93.86966455696205,87.98734177215191,4.1726582278481015,25.621518987341773,5.6839178017228535,0.6679053164556961,308,14,62,2,10,98,49,79,0.142,0.764,0.095,-0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,1,0,6,2,2,1,0,13,17,5,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,7,4,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,4,7,2,7,13,1,4,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,36,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18852928937329425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054318414697024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556003685216394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883626063297943,0.2716166427071949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19864004137856411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3901973108283748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742081414737236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4070144910438625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144424118607822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18574766884942415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927327594958155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14095761659859676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39537666782282976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436183210668913,0.0,0.15091910283173385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,20241638,2020/03/09,"Today I felt the urge to cry everytime I talked to someone. I was staying at my friends house and we were on her roof just talking about stuff, nothing really deep or emotional by the way. I started to feel the urge to cry when I was talking about how my friend was a really good friend and I felt comfortable and safe around him. I could feel my mouth start to quiver and tears start to come into my eyes and everytime I talked I had that weird voice when you try to hold back your tears. I stopped talking and it stopped but when I started talking again it happened again. Then when I left and was in the car with my sister and we were talking about stuff, I felt the urge to cry again. This time I started crying. I wasn’t sad or angry, we were just talking about life and I started crying for no reason. Can someone explain what this means?",2.7367652859960567,4.7097978639053295,3.0477869822485215,93.27862327416176,76.27810650887574,5.926785009861934,24.87613412228797,6.742157984588678,0.7520411045364899,665,23,140,6,15,204,86,169,0.195,0.728,0.077,-0.9691,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,3,2,0,0,16,8,0,0,6,0,11,3,2,2,0,35,26,18,0,1,5,1,5,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,8,16,0,4,8,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,12,7,28,6,20,13,0,30,0,1,1,0,20,7,0,2,19,98,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774993176929797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694157204614741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499202326037023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695080476843778,0.0,0.4781409384550305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792757239394573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803741822751171,0.0,0.2507655394628249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20178040660922889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301940419995842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698434725960196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045225870173298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458784454582302,0.0,0.06149103725472595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483075436371001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353368014150238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154207472137076,0.08950924608913922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14752647566718355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3697169788179526,0.0927913349920723,0.0,0.14556734549740938,0.0,0.0,0.19931920931681896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5597858943995121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05076372229849879,0.0,0.08251999568598814,0.0,0.0,0.05910608798467677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910191082305547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DarkFlame9604,2020/03/09,"My girlfriend is happier with her ex and i just want to dissapear My girlfriend and i have been dating for almost 5 years but even after all that time i just can't stop to compare myself with her ex ( who she still it's friends with ) 
He's just better than me in everything that i like or do, I stop to play league of Legends after they start to duo Q because that was the moment i felt i would never be as good as him, he has a better family, he's studding at uni and is better looking and smarter than me, sometimes i just wish i didn't apper in her life soo they could be together.

Sorry for posting this I know this is not as important as other people's problems but i just need to get this out of my chest

Sorry for my bad english, i'm still studyng",4.969559748427677,4.453699918238994,6.0685534591194985,83.02031446540882,68.68553459119498,8.576100628930817,29.616352201257854,7.793537801064563,1.767608805031447,593,19,126,6,9,199,98,159,0.09300000000000001,0.69,0.21600000000000005,0.9699,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,3,8,9,0,0,2,0,14,3,1,0,2,30,23,11,0,6,9,2,1,1,3,1,1,0,0,0,9,8,0,2,2,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,2,25,7,25,15,1,17,0,0,1,1,16,4,0,2,13,93,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17085973410147362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246761913511308,0.10401351249754684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4527209640928474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623292411587076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269847450664724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334983849168887,0.0,0.16085330643626475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638300592359206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318271084545841,0.0,0.08914631677617113,0.0,0.0,0.1431150389452645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377292757406004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051991231530515,0.08336043635899587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432849146127174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265188252489823,0.13159917081217082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829227525001418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341487818935455,0.0,0.0,0.16326837193355476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16875588880287404,0.3820091350709017,0.120771687110641,0.0,0.2725281830637917,0.28530602992830745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994948147462477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064107395819064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19621428370070065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120954726236202,0.0,0.0,0.10987912023060853
mentalhealth,duanxiu,2020/03/09,"Wanting to ask about something I feel might sound stupid but I really want answers for. I don’t actually know if this fits here, mainly because I don’t know what’s going on with me so ultimately it may not fit.

Might be worth noting that I (25f) am high functioning aspergers with pretty bad anxiety. I live in the middle of nowhere and our only shop closes 9pm or 10pm. The past year I’ve come to realise that I am probably an alcoholic, but my alcoholism doesn’t seem to exist when I’m in a city and that is why I’m writing this post.

In my village our shop closes early so I have nowhere else to shop at night. I drink a lot, 70cl of spirit upto 3 times a week. However, I visit cities often (I spend a month or 2 in Seoul every year) and I don’t drink much at all there even though I go to meet friends.

I have noticed that any time I live in an area where shops aren’t 24hr I get antsy and I HAVE to go to the shop before it closes. I tried not drinking tonight but when it got to 10mins before the shop closed I gave up and ran to the shop to get wine. I don’t do this when I have a 24hr shop nearby, in fact I dont even drink half as much and tend to only drink in social settings in those scenarios. So my current situation means I always go to the shop and get drinks and then get far too drunk and hate myself which I really want to stop doing. But like I said, when I live in 24hr places that isn’t a problem, I’m very sensible and have no anxieties about it, go to bed at a normal time, wake up at a normal time, drink normal amounts. It’s like I HAVE to drink when shops aren’t 24hr?

I’m just wondering if anyone is in a similar situation or can give advice?",2.872821229050281,3.5337319022346385,4.497593296089384,88.3225463687151,73.5530726256983,7.739173184357543,23.53787709497207,7.9765259561132025,0.965812379888269,1303,33,298,18,25,440,180,358,0.09300000000000001,0.8390000000000001,0.068,-0.8588,4,0,12,0,0,0,29.0,2,0,0,0,19,7,2,0,17,0,26,13,1,0,2,52,57,30,0,9,12,0,1,2,1,3,2,2,1,0,16,17,12,1,7,20,12,8,12,4,0,1,4,3,34,3,40,49,6,59,1,0,0,0,11,29,0,12,22,179,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.07661957212386944,0.0,0.0,0.07672420770272466,0.0,0.16781787932514122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533098973522271,0.0,0.0,0.053393072217802776,0.0,0.12012792477153116,0.0,0.0,0.05489969846260977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340117346355006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555696621704132,0.04786217644621883,0.0,0.13362141422056922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676339480926784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201930516468186,0.6153205445704458,0.0,0.0,0.06558942857536387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371718332623486,0.0,0.06615249662066522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0396996768172244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060660698535653625,0.0,0.1640839402735198,0.07531899603286203,0.2231101708121919,0.0,0.06279582947323767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751756856250709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295568766095672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629987196200135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671718448585525,0.0,0.2079912508828636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06675087008878784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552614050638742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16658457579881267,0.0,0.0,0.06267013499136469,0.0,0.11543550688121484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368125690079849,0.2307848663266973,0.0,0.08939014895301105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942879326972572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074951704088963,0.0,0.0,0.08203174021064613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519591970342036,0.0798782506757784,0.08465273468940954,0.07512850434461563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059777778847466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468599629073416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147734791299708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650889376736426,0.0,0.08003642442937532,0.0,0.060444886469533624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564227674707603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714084866197186,0.0,0.18313152837641453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053306710672912934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06478331594118306,0.13893101166939684,0.0,0.06298020916067164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084781388291468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514645504099759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112251214200102
mentalhealth,sad_squidward_,2020/03/09,"I need help I know the first thing you're thinking is that I should go to a therapist. Well, I can't. Let me explain.
I'm 13 (f) and I've been feeling alone and depressed the past 2 years and I cry myself to sleep every night. That is, if I manage to even sleep. Basically, the problem is my parents. I love them, but they make me feel like shit. My parents think therapists are jokes and people who need them are ""snowflakes"". My mom will scream at me over nothing to the point of crying, get mad at me for crying, and then apologize and say that she loves me and talks about how she's so stressed and makes me feel guilty. But, when I cry or try to tell her about my feelings and how I feel stressed, she gets mad and calls me a ""snowflake"". My dad just stands there. I don't know what to do, I'm afraid to talk to my parents and don't even want to get out of bed. I want to just fall into a coma and wake up when everything is better again or never wake up. I get 2-5 hours of sleep every night and I over think everything. I have panic attacks in the bathrooms at school after tests or just randomly. I haven't told anyone but I don't even like hanging out with my friends anymore. I just want to go home and sleep but even if I wanted to I couldn't because I can't sleep. Melatonin doesn't work. What do I do? Please help. If you want me to go more into detail, I can.",1.0994043528064168,2.851792731958767,2.3597250859106538,97.34091638029786,80.44329896907217,5.2733104238258885,20.399770904925546,6.037888025583468,-0.18003459335624328,1059,28,251,7,27,339,144,291,0.19699999999999998,0.685,0.11800000000000001,-0.9784,3,1,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,3,3,18,19,4,4,8,0,23,11,8,4,1,60,55,30,0,13,14,5,5,2,1,2,1,2,2,0,7,19,0,0,11,1,0,5,9,11,1,1,2,7,46,8,33,49,1,31,0,1,0,2,27,13,1,7,14,161,53,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461031589305636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101846697589378,0.057122323698575915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293868524236623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04979988620049156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225167817477034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341867788049097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35894796244992944,0.0,0.0,0.07036289714041143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21583238833636725,0.0,0.13766138726638666,0.0,0.14684254617264228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20653463073452194,0.05836218889496653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948884962932789,0.0,0.0,0.06311655900797485,0.0,0.17072691130399034,0.0,0.13928569833138665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095154928696478,0.0,0.08194571339605616,0.0,0.08045210500945607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897937394814018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353761983870707,0.0,0.07982309499257075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474639959612093,0.0,0.10906271943262373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956789909693046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115008806702485,0.06300742637337359,0.0,0.0,0.15332851454810215,0.0,0.07838756805582661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585027250893044,0.27213445944896464,0.0,0.07798613876987939,0.0566363129596923,0.0,0.0,0.08967544744159314,0.07722720800892066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817009681912547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496632434928623,0.0,0.08267865964486032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385768681121893,0.0,0.0,0.4087648448683712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18716033453451694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132503805531584,0.07140413108144596,0.0,0.0,0.18970599277672848,0.054273844010835584,0.15703859304057166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806208979319244,0.0,0.055464843480666964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409261022855733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345269058951487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05947418354191888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05260823860191712
mentalhealth,ramenlover2200,2020/03/09,"worst psychiatrist meeting I ever had This still gets me in a ringer. Had to meet a new psychiatrist to prescribe me some new medication yesterday. We talk about it, and after a brief pause, she tells me im quiet. I make a comment and we talk about my insurance and I have to bring my dad in. After I did so, she completely refers me in third person and says this  “he sounds very depressed”. At this point she is just completely talking to my dad and not me, talking about if which medication was right for me. She asks what happened that brought me here. I give her a run down of the story, and after I finish talking, she says “ok I think Im going to ask the dad here about what happened”. After he explains what happened, she again tells him that I was quiet, and him agreeing, with me in the SAME ROOM. Literally every time I tried to chip in and talk, she would just repeat what I was saying. At this point it was time to leave, and she laughs at me, when I made a comment saying that I was tired. Dunno why I posted this, but I find this a little patronizing and disrespectful. Clients should be treated with respect and not be treated as children.",4.337758810572687,5.425933533039651,5.069997246696037,83.98270512114537,70.49779735682819,7.613325991189427,27.403359030837002,7.865858978985527,1.541555286343613,900,30,181,11,16,291,114,227,0.037000000000000005,0.9179999999999999,0.045,0.3926,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,2,0,0,0,13,7,0,0,10,1,14,3,0,2,1,33,28,16,0,3,6,3,0,0,0,2,3,7,1,2,16,15,0,0,4,0,0,5,2,2,0,1,10,7,39,5,29,14,3,35,0,1,0,0,40,14,0,3,15,136,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20390513733572466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22868612555794365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392970864138182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864732798418864,0.09188432059084288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967513999011593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569772198408269,0.10461638081096997,0.06197899553070262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893133836838456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355982267835889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547447843767755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930268714886864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319135336072048,0.07279567695670934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21972474290622449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21065378440941732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522342747028016,0.0,0.0,0.2061861987572756,0.0,0.10444543057493563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313316431660737,0.0,0.34690259586399297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709220280089798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5259301306442228,0.1906393710562338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987863343336641,0.0,0.0,0.12718277406912706,0.12534374333323975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404181464533184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998255961541465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840600999999928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747020035067477,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gunzerkerboi,2020/03/09,"There is no one in my life better off with me actually in it All I am to everyone around me is a disappointment, a leech, a weight on their shoulders. I'm unemployed, taking money from my parents to go to college, failing my classes no matter how hard I do try, I'm a failure as a creative writer I cant even sit down and write, I'm a failure as a friend because all I've ever done is distance myself from them, according to my girlfriend I'm just an annoying piece of human garbage. She says ""you're you"" as an insult, I'm a failure as a sibling, my own brother scratched his face out of the family pictures and abandoned us blamed me and everyone else, my own memory betrays me I cant even remember half my life anymore. I'm a failure at every god damn turn and I'm bringing everyone around me down with me. If I just disappeared everyone's lives would get better I cant take it anymore I do just want to be out of everyone's hair forever but I would never take my own life. I just want to disappear to another part of the world and live in solidarity where I can no longer be a burden on everyone I have ever known",5.419499336870028,4.920203728448279,7.086379310344827,76.04270557029182,67.75,10.414323607427058,35.08753315649868,10.035473477838034,3.420902785145889,883,40,178,19,13,309,124,232,0.17800000000000002,0.7509999999999999,0.071,-0.9636,3,0,0,0,0,2,17.0,1,1,2,3,13,10,3,0,15,0,16,7,3,1,5,32,32,12,0,5,6,2,4,0,2,2,3,1,0,1,2,11,1,1,2,0,1,4,7,7,0,2,1,5,32,3,32,27,7,23,0,3,0,0,14,15,1,1,3,128,34,4,0.0,0.0,0.10780504411317264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158398550692639,0.0,0.0,0.2191177043754147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19668756458706396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673428981670029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19540757125949407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305153393387728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228544410941818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459318450082476,0.19985706807367026,0.0930776904477858,0.6333661899325191,0.0,0.0,0.1041434672770864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535063692341781,0.0,0.05771722527650111,0.0,0.06278396273897421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989614957214478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340895904944216,0.0,0.0,0.19509815708124828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520306012235722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485890003453735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266643285504213,0.1196307522471172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12514359818023005,0.0,0.0,0.08785201932640717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491842984392137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07500345063701053,0.120162156349244,0.0,0.0,0.1328845934592454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031886785179156,0.0,0.0,0.1345255188742426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695272666328394,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway1028374q,2020/03/09,I cant handle emotions anymore I cant feel anything anymore when i want to cry i just cry and when i feel i want to be happy i just am it doesnt make sense i just tell myself i want to be this or that and it happens this has been happening over a year can someone explain this i just want to know what happened to me i just dont feel normal,-1.1867532467532451,0.8216280519480534,1.3584545454545456,99.03768181818184,93.15584415584415,3.59948051948052,19.388311688311685,4.935628992294339,-0.5382093506493502,268,9,64,1,10,91,42,77,0.09,0.7809999999999999,0.129,-0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,1,0,10,0,0,1,0,19,23,5,0,5,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,3,13,1,6,20,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,47,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3521794747926001,0.0,0.0,0.14611503260044414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3900780575467546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080965503948326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19972875227505865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26933584586416504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4710416253661997,0.18901369892107972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758118485392013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11852128497032205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739690545730943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15044424257761455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551934412050025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4189130272830639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143414738154676
mentalhealth,Entrar5269,2020/03/09,I want to know whats wrong with me I cant really feel emotions that well and sorry if write wrong i dont speak english well but i just cant really tell how i feel about anything if i want to laugh i just do it if i want to feel sad my body just does it like i cant really feel anything without trying too and this has been happening over the course of like a year and i just want to know whats wrong did something happen to my brain i just want to know,-0.3086363636363636,1.587889401960787,1.7930303030303032,98.72318181818184,86.35294117647058,5.277718360071302,16.13547237076649,6.574015621080383,-0.5289137254901961,357,7,89,4,11,119,53,102,0.13,0.6629999999999999,0.20600000000000002,0.5994,0,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,0,2,0,8,2,2,1,0,28,22,8,0,8,10,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,7,0,0,0,5,4,2,0,2,5,14,5,11,20,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,3,3,57,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320999770366013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566448634921142,0.0,0.15742840946749576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341025787956472,0.0,0.16527801318058824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586319969669199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852220497218311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24941250849879115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23250780936824386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779351850069624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710290109261153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856646575120092,0.0,0.15786380542124756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326039798523343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574542226160013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4158953663182013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535933912513475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359412279725845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4625598377758437,0.0,0.09081424742747687
mentalhealth,lumpydukeofspacenuts,2020/03/09,"Jealousy issues I am in a relationship and so far my jealousy issues havent cropped up..... until about friday afternoon.  I saw a picture of a pretty girl he liked on insta and the jealousy demon wooshed up out of nowhere and won't go back down into her demon hole.  

I was PMSing and recently stopped taking my birth control temporarily. I got my period last night and think that MAYBE this has something to do with it?  But I'm flat out terrified that my little green monster is going to ruin this otherwise so far perfect relationship.  

I did text my bf about this image I saw and asked him if I was enough for him.  Stupid, I know, but I was in full emotional flood mode.  I even cried about it.  Even more stupid.  But anyway how do y'all deal with jealousy?  

For some background info my dad and uncles and even a few aunts (I have a very large extended family) were/are serial cheaters and i have some trauma around cheating and infidelity that gets triggered fairly easily.  

Thanks for reading!  Hope everyone is having a good day.",4.664251700680276,6.354244540816327,5.520285714285716,78.75804761904764,70.42857142857143,8.696054421768707,27.862585034013605,9.21078282632365,2.454593605442176,814,29,147,17,15,266,128,196,0.18,0.713,0.107,-0.9394,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,2,12,10,3,0,7,0,15,0,0,3,1,31,28,18,0,2,4,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,8,16,0,2,3,1,0,2,2,5,0,0,7,3,22,5,23,20,6,26,2,1,3,0,13,14,0,4,11,103,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443527068491373,0.15159343263685476,0.0,0.0,0.1246875122679082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18187109705549356,0.0,0.0,0.17812011970170602,0.10457683408973537,0.16717512255188574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18240302716254034,0.0,0.16754990049919116,0.0,0.3213063858915886,0.0,0.0,0.15494645723270625,0.0,0.0,0.15286570285888545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471951664027419,0.0,0.18431332935793293,0.13600827675067495,0.12969050624039252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16105692480230582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3384962679813636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911638063482334,0.13217831365319332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922094967746568,0.16252233521755613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16290691919096167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521718812865661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649703627555978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621993061706017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010891922597448,0.3481884821146458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248351680618814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13556919581304971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192069881496895,0.0,0.0,0.14929092871231406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390264854087672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379520759295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Noquian,2020/03/09,I need help! My parents are neglecting me! Ok so I'm a 16 year all boy and I think I have some mental illness. I told my parents and they think that with just praying I will be a normal human. I'm in Costa Rica so the law her is deferent. What should I do to go to a psychologist? Please I don't know what to do and it is eating me from inside,-1.4314285714285688,0.5161812467532485,1.9714415584415583,94.64287662337664,93.67532467532469,4.638441558441558,16.790909090909093,6.2581,-0.3300275324675321,264,7,63,3,10,95,53,77,0.073,0.787,0.14,0.5972,3,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,4,1,10,2,0,0,1,15,18,5,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,4,4,1,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,13,1,6,14,2,3,1,1,0,0,8,1,0,1,1,45,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27591484275185124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15324585115077488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807378121378593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481902111956196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27173941916901273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19993885142447854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641955104079005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5988192235859319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959899781918273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34555612158782056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576579979770326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17364297408868618
mentalhealth,Smeshie,2020/03/09,"13 Months Sober, Anxiety Improving It's been such a fucking journey. Holy.

Just want to start off by saying that it's been a mental rollercoaster and it's defining me as a person. 

So many people think alcohol is no big deal. Many people think it's safe in moderation but it's one of the worst drugs out there. I drank heavily for years just to numb myself from feeling guilt for my life choices and past trauma. I really want to advocate for better care and awareness for substance abusers and mental health. I thought I was fine I'd drink every night to quell my sorrow and in turn I would wake up the next day feeling awful and lethargic. 

Since quitting alcohol I've been painting. I've been using it as an outlet for my pain and growth. I've been singing in the shower for the first time in years. I'm working on a children's book and I've been working as a freelancer. If you need to know theres a way out I want you to know there is. 

I certainly didn't think I'd be writing this post today but here I am. I feel strength fueling my body daily. I feel nourished by the food I eat, rested with sleep and hydrated with the water I drink. 

Please know you are worth it and I believe in you ! Whatever it is your fighting whether it be substance abuse or mental health issues know you're stronger than your demons and you've got this 💯💯💯",1.6840669371196741,4.0452634411764725,2.8179310344827613,91.565,81.86764705882355,5.663488843813387,23.349898580121703,6.953978226594392,0.8092133367139964,1064,38,218,13,29,340,153,272,0.163,0.6890000000000001,0.14800000000000002,-0.9051,1,0,5,0,4,0,19.0,0,6,0,6,8,14,2,1,13,1,16,18,3,1,1,43,40,20,0,6,7,0,4,0,0,1,8,1,1,2,12,15,8,1,12,4,1,2,2,8,0,2,11,5,25,6,32,26,2,26,1,1,0,1,12,11,1,2,11,127,37,3,0.0,0.2557030999931049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306384505424283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254817230321362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215736667539074,0.0,0.09543452472144504,0.0,0.11985978868783174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001786188567976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959076153458224,0.11124685681381467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21141456672756012,0.12513727461086074,0.1104152819083815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091587488448087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21824306170428584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917852083902264,0.13048096046658378,0.0,0.0,0.09975781461430017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630268043236043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22939911366861865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262634440254707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23721034768604735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621754765208429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21880049597160547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262330972185266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612993375806388,0.0,0.0,0.0800112977768525,0.0,0.0,0.11475978018875276,0.10126293452138084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731202327516686,0.0,0.11482011723658901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300895808068553,0.14961755202997215,0.094219788123701,0.0,0.1184489263359393,0.0,0.0,0.10334459282439233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477183848912086,0.0,0.0,0.06912766294761953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581157481458151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926136663738307,0.0,0.10798442244756128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637677161012119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074263722082608,0.0,0.08566570270034979,0.06292114421904052,0.0,0.1022827388224486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737127898146275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319656466997424,0.0,0.0,0.19093813717929214,0.08565115204007273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15711442510136706,0.0,0.0,0.07665367711343284,0.0,0.0,0.1389764881380846
mentalhealth,mhnh,2020/03/09,"I think I have PTSD Last year ended up incredibly traumatic for me. I was sexually assaulted which caused me to lose my job and one of my best friends. The stress was so bad that my stomach constantly felt like I was on a rollercoaster, and this uneasy feeling lasted for weeks. A few months later I had a horrible (but consensual) sexual experience with someone and I regret it so much, I made myself forget it happened, and during the experience I just disassociated in order to endure it.

Fast forward another 5 months and my ability to concentrate is at a minimum (it was bad before but it's getting worse) and I keep getting flashbacks. I can't stop myself from thinking about the people responsible for the intense stress I felt. I see posts online about women and assault experiences and I get angry and upset, I deleted Facebook and instagram because I couldn't deal with it. I feel dirty a lot, and my general anxiety has just been on a huge increase since Christmas.

I never thought I'd experience PTSD from these events but now I'm sat here I realise that it's just sort of crept up on me and I've let it do that by pushing it aside all the time. This is such an uncomfortable feeling.",3.9577074235807856,6.1616062882096125,5.570696506550217,75.51718013100441,73.45414847161571,8.597467248908298,30.22729257641921,9.255337874911486,3.005073187772926,956,43,169,23,20,324,140,229,0.196,0.705,0.099,-0.9756,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,11,12,2,3,12,0,14,1,1,2,2,40,31,17,0,2,6,0,5,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,16,14,0,2,8,0,0,3,3,9,0,1,11,6,28,3,22,18,6,28,0,2,1,0,3,9,0,2,17,122,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700890057931724,0.0926594012231814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20226668352865626,0.07383596477138019,0.0,0.103067461256992,0.0,0.1271119906846828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442754226946053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308918341615838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12487335397888352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727976516862617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4739294046631277,0.0,0.0,0.18373154899498934,0.0,0.2325957501439413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357997342888646,0.0,0.18984661166419828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10710940609231907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019671519833497,0.10766042866540007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19746418123933854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385732631322445,0.0,0.059174986927538524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550658759433334,0.0,0.1029751519526664,0.0,0.11461030006556068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193359776885182,0.0,0.08903995443066759,0.0,0.09341816756990548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207664440082951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397201535033681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600315093092485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28317455957296433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652001347536228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001948868668142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026278312026224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012649485101548,0.2774938844569874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15522252369291975,0.0,0.09615879426646573,0.07062828146210527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715823328901038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343553440319882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799977767935491
mentalhealth,pixelizedgaming,2020/03/09,"what's the point of even going on when you die, you move on. For most people, no one will remember you. You're just a statistic, a number in the decade's census. 

Why doesnt anyone care about me? Everyone who says they care all sound super fake and just trying to keep me going. Everything I do is meaningless. I don't feel like I can do anything right. I don't feel happy doing anything anymore. My grades are terrible. Everyone else is far superior to me in every aspect. I don't know how I'm going to be able to go on after high school. What do I do?  I don't even think I'll be able to get into college, much less a career. My parents have repeated for the past 10 years that they'll kick me out after I graduate high school.

What if I end up getting hooked on something, or end up doing something really bad? Might as well prevent something from happening in the first place.",2.319615921787712,4.219870357541899,4.001057960893856,86.30315118715086,77.26815642458101,6.933100558659219,22.91934357541899,7.865858978985527,1.16700251396648,690,21,139,11,16,231,113,179,0.165,0.77,0.065,-0.96,1,0,3,0,0,0,21.0,0,3,2,2,8,10,0,0,7,0,21,0,0,1,1,18,36,6,1,1,4,1,2,1,0,3,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,2,5,0,0,5,6,3,1,2,0,4,20,7,24,31,4,31,0,0,0,0,8,17,0,4,10,93,25,6,0.2493164326747763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362745394472932,0.08716392331100029,0.0,0.20516618095454764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040844036645441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541947191811445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12937554756402012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413594395694202,0.0,0.2208203583120858,0.0,0.0,0.16467115242241245,0.0,0.105029923729034,0.23823253564174865,0.1120347668358536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606187948098788,0.08905585465931945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603421513490302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13025754591629088,0.0,0.283384548377042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102348490170707,0.13270098930126353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634164995429083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080195037973,0.0,0.0,0.06850889560502921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06090170777272307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13224266795939135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13249195588218135,0.09163813236618593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447163357021042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13841819693737606,0.0,0.1190003728652282,0.08642231127511894,0.0,0.13024130392370753,0.0,0.11784230753518952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985924544179021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121345844329675,0.10645743563120726,0.0,0.09913321704592926,0.0,0.2523215402359608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879039555578332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987595155083549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463474611285844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208270733724936,0.0,0.11248465089927998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027580424111194
mentalhealth,iamdetermination,2020/03/09,Rabbit Hole/Spiral Writing Does anyone else start to write when they are spiraling or going down a dark rabbit hole. I can't help but just frantically write down everything my dark voice is saying to me. But then I feel guilty because part of me wants my husband to see so then I think it must be a petty ploy for attention and I start to feel worse...,2.342714285714284,4.6758741285714285,3.312857142857143,89.12214285714286,79.14285714285714,6.285714285714287,20.0,7.447530270364453,0.5837142857142861,279,7,56,4,7,89,52,70,0.155,0.845,0.0,-0.8634,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,0,1,14,13,8,0,2,4,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,5,9,0,8,11,1,8,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,1,5,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20004202334675134,0.29313483562207704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439889263875746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503608431215664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389929702675693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25712084302425225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893131984008412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16259255059080893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19176128843308274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098095164496737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22751166498075304,0.0,0.0,0.2279781068711087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4049944663623785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18331605964964276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16874434321884565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915519635836774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TylerScurr,2020/03/09,"Been feeling symptoms of derealisation for a week straight. Not sure why but for the last week I've been feeling distanced from reality like i'm experiencing symptoms of derealisation.Even when I forget that I have feelings of derealisation it just I think about it later and in memories I feel like everything I do is a dream.  
Whenever I tell my mum that this is happening to me she just says its normal for someone like me with anxiety and for the first few days it was fine but now it keeps going on and isn't stopping.  


Is it normal to have a derealisation episode for a week or more? It's really messing with my life at this point because I can't differentiate reality from a dream and I can't enjoy things constantly feeling like things i'm doing aren't actually happening such as writing this post.",3.948488479262672,6.2980397612903225,6.009147465437793,71.69943548387099,73.96774193548387,8.815668202764977,30.426267281106,9.424239791934726,3.0982073732718898,653,30,119,17,14,227,90,155,0.06,0.758,0.182,0.9407,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,7,0,14,3,0,0,1,25,26,9,0,2,6,1,5,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,14,6,0,2,6,2,0,1,5,1,0,1,3,7,13,7,19,23,2,18,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,15,83,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.14391078077072464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281519177821313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989717628057263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936415709803725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510683143508138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740344678307666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253775526338302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3728297697796953,0.21070714748577465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543906906759622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381137609999684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26081688485015675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107932650630105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020884649463175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416338745394904,0.2881882425561525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889812562030357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940810836563444,0.0,0.14123680432196906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447393364409802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727514976271156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495201033102912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232926657821516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13899001773911154,0.3065584312853945,0.0,0.0,0.1288964744446846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19594684625677836,0.09449369706445923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35487790477723985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306997062455445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw_me_away_mmkay,2020/03/09,"I feel like I'll be like this for the rest of my life. I'm a 23 year old woman, though I honestly feel like I'm stuck in the mindset of a child entering adolescence. I'm not sure if it's due to childhood trauma, being developmentally delayed or potentially on the autism spectrum, or a combination of things. Either way, I find myself feeling significantly far behind compared to my peers.

People talk to me like I'm a small child, and it hurts to know that their demeanor changes significantly when talking to someone else. It's embarrassing and painful for me to here the condescending tone in their voices, to be treated like I'm incompetent. I've been told that my voice sounds really odd, so maybe that's a contributing factor to my treatment from others.

It also doesn't help that I've been taken advantage of by others in the past, and I probably would be considered a vulnerable adult to others. I hate realizing after the fact that maybe I shouldn't have done something, or that I was being lied to. I wish I had the ability to use critical thinking skills in the moment as opposed to just acting impulsively without a second thought.

I know people tell me that I'm intelligent, and I guess I did do well academically in school. However, what good does that do me if I don't have wisdom and use actual logic and reasoning? How come I couldn't make it past a semester in college without going to a psych ward from being overwhelmed? Why am I struggling to find a job or nail an interview?

I'm just stupid, vulnerable, and unable to properly function in society. People don't want a moron in their presence, and I can't blame someone for wanting a competent person among them. I want to be normal: I want to not be seen as an idiot or incapable of functioning in society. Unfortunately, it seems as though I stick out like a sore thumb.",8.028333333333336,7.194137200564972,8.746666666666666,67.38180790960452,62.58757062146893,11.934463276836158,36.61581920903954,11.20814326018867,4.131487005649717,1475,60,265,36,18,500,189,354,0.16899999999999998,0.7140000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.9511,2,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,4,3,10,23,4,3,23,0,26,3,0,5,2,55,57,24,0,11,14,0,3,6,0,2,3,3,0,5,20,10,0,2,13,0,0,4,10,10,1,1,11,7,32,13,47,35,2,29,0,2,1,0,15,14,0,9,16,178,52,6,0.0,0.0,0.107473532963998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807300221874924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650569010433935,0.09486948501973323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637778238770738,0.11270388931076455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092001657261776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16705905841570862,0.15735750608663984,0.0,0.0,0.2013184064477647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259089585784122,0.0923740015500897,0.0,0.0,0.1213234778229151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087331438855188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381956178353362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789922851087625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928961398046314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105199594566148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778991396766168,0.3228313586409502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351436718656344,0.0,0.2212860035489208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790656682627256,0.0,0.0,0.11556563974946896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718885370548693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21026806119695102,0.22905623820891985,0.09616354026045047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874157241998665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055376509918163,0.11323465765816555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146007316239807,0.0,0.1002605847848827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866299929624384,0.08478545779381556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11513450820923232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379867424213028,0.0,0.0,0.17704082785781042,0.0962607486456776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316720723626742,0.07056852455360398,0.2164094450472774,0.08743298424476736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523642106599873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19023841545919007,0.0,0.0,0.2598362489457774,0.08741813340469191,0.0,0.0,0.09902243580446407,0.0,0.09937754348801096,0.0,0.12664705736236673,0.21232779692990109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823504077011316,0.0,0.0,0.07092178500113229
mentalhealth,nohbdy954,2020/03/09,"I’m a medical student and I completely lost it about a year ago I’m a third year medical student. I was admitted to a psych facility after my second year before my first board exams (probably the peak of stress in med school). I had a huge breakdown and wanted to kill myself because I thought I was about to get expelled. I wasn’t, I was freaking out about nothing. I had been getting pretty delusional and my perception of things clearly was getting off. I knew I needed help...but I also believed some really crazy stuff there for awhile.

I started hearing voices while I was in the facility and man I was on a really messed up ride when I was in there. I thought they were torturing the patients at nights with saws and drills and stuff. I could hear the saws and the screams at night...it scared the living hell out of me. Those nights were probably the most terrified I’ve ever been in my life.

When I was first admitted I was certain that the place was run by a criminal organization that I delusionally had started believing was real before I was admitted. A few days in I thought we all had implants that had been put in our heads with some criminal technology that no one knew existed and we were communicating via our thoughts (hence the voices). I thought that another med student’s father (the med student was a girl I had a crush on actually) ran this criminal organization and controlled all these people that had implants placed in their heads almost like bees in a beehive. And everything these people said had two meanings. There was the surface level everyday meaning that was intended to blend in to the everyday conversation you were having. Just small talk stuff. Then there was the hidden deeper meaning that was more symbolically derived from the words used. So I thought everything everyone said to me in this place had a second deeper meaning on top of the normal conversation we were having. And that deeper meaning tended to have a lot to do with how much trouble I was in with this organization.

Since I was interested in his daughter, which he knew since they could read every thought I had, even though I was in trouble there was the possibility of me getting initiated into the organization as a ‘chieftain.’ But this guy was getting really pissed at me because of some of my thoughts that he heard which I couldn’t control. In particular he really didn’t like that I was bi. As for that I had decided to come out during med school of all times. It added some significant stress.

Before I got out I thought I was about to get tortured any day because I was pissing him off. Her father was the predominant voice I would hear during this time at nights. I would also communicate with her and some of the other med students via the other psych patients as proxies (I thought elite members of this organization could take over the mind of anyone with implants when they desired) speaking using that coded way of speaking in symbols.

Each day was so elaborate, it’s pretty wild that my mind came up with all of this. Sometimes I was scared to death, most of the time I was uneasy, but sometimes what I was perceiving was so elaborate it was aesthetically pleasing to me. There was one moment when I thought the girl was setting up a scene using all the people with implants to show me what she could do that was truly beautiful.

I ended up becoming friends with this girl when I got out. She’s one of the nicest people I know.

Anyway when I got out they turned me over to my parents. I didn’t think my parents were really my parents. I thought it was like invasion of the bodysnatchers or something. They were other people pretending to be my parents. I thought this organization put implants in all my family members to control me.

Eventually I came back to reality. This only happened by letting go of all those thoughts. I didn’t just randomly start believing these things. They seemed crazy to me but I felt like I had to admit that they were the only ideas that really explained what I was experiencing. I had to just let it go. It didn’t matter if it was real or made sense or not, I chose to let it go. Pretty damn scary tbh. Being around family helped a lot too I think.

Anyway after I got out and pulled myself back together I started studying like crazy for my boards and passed them. Didn’t do as well as I wanted (I had been in the top 10-20% of my class) but did pretty close to average.

Now I’ve about made it through another year of medical school and am still doing well (one more year left). I’ve put most of all of this behind me but I am really unsettled that it happened to me. I didn’t use any drugs or anything. The really wild stuff lasted about 2 weeks but I thought people were speaking in that coded way for months. Right now the docs I’ve seen are calling it an extended psychotic episode fueled by sleep deprivation (I’d gone several days without sleep) and stress but all that needs to happen for it to turn into schizophrenia or something similar is for this to happen again at some point now.

Still doing good right now though as far as I know. Not hearing voices anymore. No delusions that I know. Not living in a bizarre state of affairs. I’ve just been on sertraline and low dose aripiprazole since, not a huge deal there yet. Just need to make it another year!",5.2145250060792785,6.661303150887576,5.816609386398637,78.10072991813246,68.7731755424063,8.869773851017266,30.85293561373645,9.257161974363822,2.7479895328415878,4241,172,776,84,73,1374,364,1014,0.084,0.835,0.081,0.1211,4,0,3,0,0,1,88.0,5,1,9,9,50,31,7,5,49,0,98,13,6,12,12,164,188,53,2,15,23,7,1,5,1,2,6,15,0,5,66,44,0,3,39,3,0,15,15,20,2,10,110,20,114,11,132,66,25,133,1,3,3,1,59,63,4,21,56,575,180,14,0.0,0.0,0.03707409399939595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03367705469383014,0.0,0.038042866340221936,0.0,0.0,0.060763365137735226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05167086485732747,0.11951178289596001,0.0,0.0,0.037677227609210544,0.026564447241375414,0.0,0.031263658074657495,0.03382037138428323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058426032513407326,0.0,0.06947755434006117,0.04195848016621682,0.09698356569657046,0.12840978286226193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038793433530380665,0.08690400596467034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032726198797931816,0.03983322562098995,0.0,0.12783164612726286,0.12133206107413624,0.0,0.0,0.0980051554087933,0.03916743131686989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04405792441133068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0336490748430017,0.0,0.0,0.025092939684999267,0.034365366616929766,0.032009365362211675,0.03630237937807262,0.0682883821599442,0.0,0.07162975957229706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036477670287847035,0.0,0.0,0.06463087494769301,0.0,0.0,0.029352036003855806,0.0,0.11909352774100028,0.0,0.06477410835607332,0.03186535626139311,0.12154066748882693,0.0,0.0,0.037617426454057606,0.13438256194259202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798020637245914,0.0,0.17127612754100652,0.0,0.0509296251287045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04288762916595331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04203181884127145,0.0,0.06263718544556443,0.03096803485210148,0.0,0.0,0.04127773154922066,0.11654624065638634,0.026834426142928657,0.09280331481097938,0.0,0.06709414642181208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04147206508679615,0.06459780350149545,0.0,0.07189670034461954,0.025359532567834686,0.0,0.0,0.20691868178362915,0.21099922171024485,0.11481691647025626,0.0,0.0,0.07672090136217045,0.0,0.03032434678528912,0.0,0.027928026184114017,0.08451035202262003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14260929778713,0.037223473457501835,0.036453741395163934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297573436947212,0.0577882933195977,0.0,0.0,0.16873966889579842,0.0,0.0,0.15803058245698934,0.0,0.11907867780520047,0.041703112516557575,0.035914121833997496,0.04282955813255223,0.0,0.15460351406157471,0.08192223882710452,0.0,0.0,0.11457545175841527,0.0,0.0,0.038001648134633484,0.08648498632798808,0.19470594087008086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648888398973759,0.07227698015449006,0.0,0.07607197229170118,0.11534787539700254,0.0,0.03458591378022634,0.0,0.04291943104546424,0.0,0.09428055444849633,0.0,0.0760376080842493,0.0,0.0,0.05849522101562825,0.07514886705887391,0.0,0.10756194078364993,0.0,0.060679909732751634,0.0,0.13055694806786106,0.0,0.17396410404080614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02856477999863868,0.03053602181259853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05047955238727184,0.04868666806692591,0.07465265062727136,0.4524135273785123,0.06645921507794267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264739588595267,0.03711204532556882,0.0,0.0,0.1312493727993993,0.0,0.0,0.04481658531265168,0.06031155775223191,0.030474383108659405,0.0,0.0683176032613283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03662232218931875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05397595436877228,0.0,0.0,0.14679116901931888
mentalhealth,LeroyBarkleys,2020/03/09,"Feeling an increasing urge to hurt/fight people. Over the past few months I've been constantly being plagued with the idea/desire to physically injure or beat up people.

It's not that I wanna beat *everyone*, but specifically, I  wanna beat up the many wanna-be gangsters and little shits and violent crackheads that have been ruining my neightboorhood as of late.

I'm a self-admitedly huge man. 6'4 and 300 pounds.

I have over 20 years of training in Judo, Wrestling and Boxing, so I don't really fear for my physical safety and am *sure* I can put people down.

I have this recurring fantasy of getting a mask, going out at night and going full batman on any of these kinds of jackass I come across.


The desire has been building so much and I have  actually bought the mask.

I've never been a violent person and I realize this is not normal.

Is this sudden desire to inflict physical violence on others and underlying sympton of a mental illness?

How can I curb this urge?",3.57431693989071,6.157849737704924,5.140027322404372,76.31911202185793,76.21311475409836,8.219672131147544,26.560109289617486,8.998388855275968,2.63716174863388,774,30,130,19,18,260,117,183,0.15,0.752,0.098,-0.9219,0,0,0,0,1,0,24.0,0,0,0,3,3,7,3,1,10,0,16,3,1,1,2,27,23,15,0,5,4,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,9,12,0,1,2,1,1,5,4,5,0,0,5,1,12,2,26,17,4,29,0,1,0,0,2,15,1,1,9,93,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.1792810545485777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493369549650553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15825571980141187,0.0,0.1985325490471763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554923547503115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20673242928142652,0.09289271302015556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598442353333796,0.0,0.2088209348862285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19667258938044066,0.20739385793448448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913127325756412,0.0,0.0,0.207240505395676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18413245584705387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18625995733598996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185143281629478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664096364032478,0.0,0.13505295600291214,0.0,0.14169368970774898,0.0,0.0,0.17240573226230005,0.18000341628120847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17537843369261058,0.3820982041297708,0.16041438698021968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468608490664726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769365964354335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19165664594555695,0.0,0.18858261221822772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315087041111027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830756889447196
mentalhealth,mephisto1090,2020/03/09,"Im just really tired of all this... My life has been going downhill steadily and i dont know what to do anymore. I have been in therapy for several years now, for health anxiety and social phobia. They locked me up once too. I have no job, no girlfriend, no ambitions, no future. I apply for about 3-5 jobs per week and i dont even get an interview. Constant nightmares. I have barely gone outside now for 2 weeks, in part because of the corona virus, but also because i want to distance myself from my friends because i drink too much with them and they started doing hard drugs which i dont want to get dragged into. Thoughts of ending it are present nearly every day, and i am so tired of trying. Half the nights i wish i dont wake up in the morning. Paranoid of shadows at night. The mental health system here is shit, and all they want to do is either dope me up and hope i dont come back, or punish me.

It feels like i am not connected with society at all and i have constant guilt about stuff i have done and things i have failed at. What should i do?",2.890718954248364,4.301110185185192,3.9514052287581727,89.36352941176472,74.46296296296295,6.563834422657952,25.20588235294117,7.048011613610866,0.9683124183006532,824,27,173,8,17,267,128,216,0.16899999999999998,0.746,0.085,-0.9412,2,0,2,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,4,1,12,7,2,1,5,0,25,9,2,0,3,30,39,13,0,6,5,0,2,1,2,1,6,0,0,0,8,13,1,0,3,1,0,3,10,4,0,1,5,2,28,3,29,33,6,30,0,1,0,0,8,11,1,2,16,128,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188865288104549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833515520396701,0.0,0.10155255247029536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873871180211953,0.0,0.1872649191657097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820789722245496,0.0,0.22131444858537228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06603905275515752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047899973613962,0.6000558625769956,0.1003122930217689,0.1187506343863848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069535248223708,0.0,0.0,0.06763374684638157,0.0,0.08627579473740812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05177614365584393,0.07315405328270215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911341586244756,0.0,0.1069987761151332,0.0,0.05819586042594675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172962554931582,0.0,0.0,0.2176912543487548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170557223482522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060877483651964,0.0,0.20323093427702846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056275956461273764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232762710555303,0.05002710706058126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319437160245586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752752398310935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19218954147171846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905187215350208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088842208589134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06559958936460286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156820193472578,0.10511137099727824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438315223658183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724787247388137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722265626062907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710248036051095,0.0,0.06802951965648697,0.0,0.0,0.08129357597451675,0.0,0.2353857764175424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952237728101017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18119321352574527,0.0,0.1642770228075633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775409782210088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06594176748099434
mentalhealth,chookittypok,2020/03/09,"Can emotions be more intense in dreams, even in a depressed brain? Anyone else feel more intense emotions during dreams?

I’ve had depression/anxiety for about five years (I’m 26). I’ve more or less learned to live with it and am somewhat functional but my emotional responses are still pretty fried. Most days I just feel numb and go through the motions. On bad days I just feel anxiety, despair and pain. 

Then there are nights where I have vivid, memorable dreams and it “feels” like my emotions are quite normal and strong. I’ve had dreams where I’ve felt anticipation, excitement, happiness and desire. Then as I wake up completely and it’s back to feeling numb and the emotion is gone with the dream. 

Is my brain mimicking these feelings while I’m asleep? Or is it some nostalgic illusion I’m making up as I wake up? I haven’t felt strong emotions (besides anxiety) in years, especially positive emotions, so it kind of takes me by surprise.

I don’t have a therapist anymore otherwise I’d ask a professional but still would like to know if anyone else has felt this too!",4.610570676031606,6.8251076865671685,4.813216271583261,81.61322212467078,71.63681592039799,8.709511267193445,31.22651448639157,9.325443323948027,2.9896553116769087,859,39,157,20,17,269,118,201,0.094,0.635,0.27,0.9913,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,3,12,14,0,0,6,0,17,8,5,1,0,36,35,19,0,4,7,0,9,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,7,10,0,0,12,5,0,3,2,6,0,1,6,10,11,8,19,27,7,23,0,2,1,0,1,9,0,6,13,95,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068593298722914,0.0,0.0893898058759114,0.12604912477832886,0.1847081370905468,0.0,0.0,0.08426415747150318,0.0,0.0,0.06930833338698777,0.07525904919503736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124117721768725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450494454112196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116259374332109,0.0,0.07763323537236942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15059263162011755,0.7097290427248053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059533387927664376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734501093955062,0.06439253827607712,0.2596315126731112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05122585833358211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595049719688144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386184332207573,0.049535897436216086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807092052140894,0.0,0.07959095061693983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06016588366996607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458569177058604,0.08831326712530772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095910108585546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916998077262954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586978098422066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14396402537464054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777038282780197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465380610604756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402939373665745,0.0,0.0,0.11608810711015365
mentalhealth,CocaChan,2020/03/09,"My dad hit me today Its the first time hes done that since like 2011. 
I just wanted to post this here. Dont know why.. maybe im just fishing for validation idk. Maybe i need validation? Is that selfish of me? I dont think so. He hit me in the face for not cleaning good enough. Im diagnosed with depression and i do take meds everyday. Im 17 too. 
But he just thinks im lazy and dont care about shit.
Thats probably the worst part about mental ilness, just like Arthur said: everyone excpect you to act like you dont. 
I worry about stuff all the time too. Is my dad mad? Have i done something i wasnt supposed to do? Did i not do something i was supposed to do? Will i ever meet someone who will unconditionally love and respect me? Will i ever meet a girl like that? Will i ever get a job? Will i ever get a job i like? Will i ever get a job that i like that pays enough? Will i ever move out of this shithole? Will i ever be able to take care of myself? Will i ever be able to consistently get out of bed before lunch? Will i ever be able to keep a routine going? Will i ever be happy? 
Is it my fault?
Should i just man up? 
Should i just disappear?
Should i just die?
Will i ever be able to not worry about being harrassed by my family the first thing in the morning and the last thing at night.
I genuinly dont think ill be able to get out of this. Not when im living under the same roof as my dad at least. 
Will i ever be happy?
Will i ever be happy?
Will i ever be happy? 
Will i ever be happy?
Will i ever be happy?
Will i ever be happy?
Will i ever be loved?
Will i ever be respected?
Will i ever be needed?
Will i ever be cherished?
Will i ever be appreciated?
Will i ever be valuable?
Will i ever be to independent?
Will i ever be happy?",-0.7812699999999992,1.3129345146666689,2.4350083333333323,91.5197125,91.85333333333332,4.7250000000000005,15.8125,6.322622252153567,-0.3557100000000002,1333,30,298,15,48,476,139,375,0.087,0.711,0.20199999999999999,0.993,3,0,2,0,2,0,50.0,0,2,0,2,41,29,2,0,13,0,69,7,2,1,26,59,92,8,1,6,12,3,0,6,0,29,2,1,2,2,15,8,1,1,4,0,1,4,10,6,0,2,6,1,53,23,33,34,7,48,0,1,0,2,16,9,1,0,40,237,68,4,0.1813132078190649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03085683710105153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394435970535619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031232960042742917,0.036805817864661916,0.03763489681048004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421854488003496,0.21249772921363427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493800470105426,0.0,0.0,0.8200408842469593,0.0,0.03465050801558756,0.0,0.0,0.03418519117391067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06168996877880058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472866765878143,0.0,0.020608894873617688,0.03041538327435047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088180499660709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958493779472631,0.0,0.10795522900409753,0.03223190198965208,0.0,0.0,0.019928999453466014,0.02955889278480425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10629656982781494,0.0,0.03202057686323806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654568995987865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286139496230548,0.0,0.040279619950033964,0.0,0.03654421363200342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03854144915117859,0.0,0.05377657847460896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034030032608930165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03926890704498597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03472958669816283,0.0,0.03909726086505592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034494076188547995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03722308045709239,0.029996831829384327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030725218520299025,0.05583350621639626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041512048829583495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05452998702912431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481825754836046,0.06970690947840158,0.0,0.0,0.04229007582459598,0.0,0.034372744123109485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02138864552698293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032721393718256116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365294547712399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IndigoTopaz,2020/03/09,"I feel so hollow and I need to vent or something I guess   Lately, I've been feeling like there's nothing in life that gives me hope or joy anymore, unless I'm drunk or high. It takes too much out of me to keep a conversation with someone, and if I do, I generally don't give a shit about what we're talking about, I just mindlessly mumble back responses. My dad left 5 years ago, my mom died a couple months ago, though I havn't really felt anything bad about it, just empty. Been in poverty my whole life, getting stuck in the system. Mother was poor her whole life, and her mother too. Guess it's our curse. I live with my grandmother, but I guess I'm just waiting for her to die. It keeps me up at night. Medicare was cut off for her and she was denied disability 3 times. We have no income, she isn't physically fit to work, I don't have a vehicle to reliably work full time, I live in the middle of nowhere. We don't have our own rooms, we're bumming off of my now diseased mother's friends. It reminds me of how bitter this world is, and how bitter I have to be to survive. Death surrounds me, but it doesn't effect me anymore. Just another lost soul, right? Shit. I can't care about the six dead kittens that I had to bury because no one else would, neglected to hell. I can't care because if I did, I wouldn't be alive anymore. That goes for the other 20 dead animals littered around the yard, people can't take care of shit? Oh, there's a dead goat too, fucking ridiculous. No one knows what to do about it. Every morning I wake up and realize that hundreds of thousands of people die every day, and that those born will suffer the same fate. It used to kill me, but the pain is my default mood now. I actively piss people off around me, in hopes that they'll hurt me, so I can match my internal pain with an external. It never works. I hate it. When those around my manage to keep a smile on their face, it pisses me off. It's unfair. I feel like I'm being mocked. I don't vent to them. I feel like a burden, why would I ruin their good mood? I just sit and think about them dying so I don't have to realize what I can't obtain, so I don't have to see their stupid fucking grins. My life is a tragedy. I can't run from myself, but suicide is over the top. Maybe I'll just sit down and never get up, unrealistic right? I can't make any meaningful connections with others. I don't talk to them, talking doesn't get rid of the pain. No one understands the pain, no one can help it. I don't smoke anymore, it's hard not to. Sorry for rambling.",1.6917210144927533,3.500057697542534,3.162567344045371,92.01785227630751,78.82986767485822,6.071849401386262,21.795880592312546,6.996647511020387,0.4624470384373036,1978,57,438,22,48,648,247,529,0.309,0.61,0.081,-0.9994,1,0,2,0,0,3,74.0,4,0,7,8,31,41,16,0,19,0,46,18,7,5,2,70,85,27,10,8,17,5,6,3,1,5,8,0,2,0,28,19,1,5,12,2,1,1,26,27,0,6,10,9,70,12,61,67,6,51,2,5,1,2,30,31,8,10,19,283,98,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248146691141855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04698097400324766,0.07244288737725202,0.0,0.0,0.2740597209991147,0.0,0.0,0.05685204268624185,0.18450405192626074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05312301085349523,0.05768407768354013,0.08422859273525407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21131390599952615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644254825810592,0.0,0.04455487314909745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868022056440214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05771264156175665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641617891203257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13972820120775642,0.14806555038443792,0.06633357054209836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053375814174861216,0.12773812723870215,0.1082840387170632,0.1325475252720426,0.0,0.0579462131417541,0.0,0.0,0.2283186606746719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188765071353613,0.06820830347754024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04630701268061902,0.0729933462064664,0.0,0.1372363376040431,0.0,0.0,0.07395818855844483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842209232554601,0.07643362632862749,0.0,0.03796795981875077,0.0,0.07793222443089018,0.0,0.07506234076714755,0.0,0.19519045876147653,0.10125605907906236,0.0,0.12200873190401952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754157305895166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04611556410343298,0.0,0.06940635737199083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091290340733816,0.05514393273342325,0.0,0.05078629420044682,0.051226529848660975,0.10656704784291267,0.0,0.0,0.06483270340508379,0.0,0.06629005655454752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18725834424238172,0.0,0.2940502817115166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368698311185785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044258378350899324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799844685151235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05505274381522487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127479244141203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05853649928211334,0.05318591948165813,0.0,0.0773363265176544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755690718603254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10388842456808406,0.16658657263448365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04426763695697313,0.06787682474596707,0.0,0.08056941861980575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192115371907211,0.0,0.05966828103668467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06233953514872529,0.15426451385154932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15088669370587607,0.0,0.0,0.0981536854860738,0.0,0.0,0.04448923724323904
mentalhealth,OwnDefinition5,2020/03/09,Well shit So I’m not a good person far from it Ive done horrible things years ago I was young. And I cheated and I was extremely abusive..... I’m better now I was going through things that were making me not the best person. I wanted to change but couldn’t.... eventually I did I’ve gotten better much better I think I hope. It’s weird I’m a male I’m very active I’m so closed in now.... I used to be so open about my mental health but I’m older I’m not in that line life I’m lifting and I work out All the time so that’s changed and I’m not like a bitch I mean lol I hope not I think it’s cause idk I’m getting off topic well the things I did I hurt people and a lot of people.... I can’t get over it....over who I was I don’t think I’ll they consider myself a good person I can’t be especially after everything I try and be kind and understanding but it’s just I’m still with the person I was with when everything went down I’ve done so much to her.... she’s gotten over everything idk how but I haven’t.... I get reminded everyday and idk I guess in short I’m wondering can you be hurt for things you did,-2.167504917387884,-0.4209889798387074,0.9956372934697092,98.69790715971679,104.12096774193549,4.354996066089694,13.306845003933912,6.219705907916566,-0.7813051927616049,855,18,212,12,41,299,116,248,0.13699999999999998,0.701,0.162,0.8986,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,2,1,5,14,18,3,0,9,1,22,3,1,4,1,40,53,19,0,4,10,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,5,12,13,0,0,6,0,0,2,10,6,2,0,14,0,33,12,19,34,5,25,0,2,0,0,11,12,2,5,12,129,45,1,0.0,0.12660307726769415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471854657940597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213540533372386,0.28350781451552004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976724392332518,0.2260721562473008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21869499464895806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28809717915892885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674785095845741,0.0,0.06072690001389632,0.1792460925549461,0.0,0.0,0.11771038912470427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135795135597176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122578503266408,0.0,0.0,0.2287762321778161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127073239889447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07547328190241878,0.052202873300897366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084241652825836,0.0,0.0,0.07132506356615795,0.0,0.0,0.11639400759272835,0.0,0.0,0.107682475015099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570981829046654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14815653389235092,0.3731989206636087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096828480609484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533277195272022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28395296902121003,0.20540084988213334,0.0,0.0,0.062306718092582536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725460268646522,0.0,0.0,0.1112375173218874,0.0,0.09228649850795373,0.0,0.08816473797244523,0.06302454092346778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19214697204167985,0.09905360200335186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158772870593362,0.07779009993040405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688096900921935
mentalhealth,lightly_salted7,2020/03/09,"Has anyone felt mentally checked out before? Lately I've felt like I haven't been 'present' and I dont know what to think of it. All I know is that I've just been zombie walking through life for the past 2 years.

 I think depression and anxiety set in because of it. To make things worse, making friends feels impossible no matter how much I get to know them. Talking to people in general is confusing because i think certain conversation cues go over my head. 

Honestly fatigue has been the worst perpetrator because I'm usually to tired to care at all about anything. I just wonder if anyone else has been where I am because I dont know how to get out of this feeling.",5.01136556403732,6.0898453358778655,5.669872773536898,80.33744698897374,68.92366412213741,8.87565733672604,32.876166242578456,9.150863307647796,2.8658644614079734,533,24,102,10,9,173,84,131,0.177,0.705,0.11800000000000001,-0.8472,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,6,9,0,1,2,0,13,4,1,4,3,29,32,5,0,1,3,0,4,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,12,0,1,2,4,4,0,0,6,4,11,5,19,26,4,15,0,2,0,0,4,7,0,3,6,64,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018292559939216,0.0,0.0,0.20141892578729825,0.14757625101474425,0.11852481567489345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3511985834386767,0.0,0.12255933305725147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14684867699102452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12405324433306585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3376053078066894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031898732239872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14565228011360062,0.0,0.2765837021881499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127759421920938,0.0,0.15049996591214648,0.0,0.08185584292019091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478168288003055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31662154789440683,0.0,0.1624726588415267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10173298993793467,0.0703660189458552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19228293221646567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451488509717488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587897768492263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749339382809356,0.0998526020850484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11576624680771355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568745326866343,0.27686675426834223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655418529690729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586292290307791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619491535672594,0.0,0.0,0.1467793674892248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927509091075736
mentalhealth,Jimmyneutron109,2020/03/09,"I’m 17 and I got oral and genital herpes Nobody will ever date me again. I will never be able to have a wife, kids, a family. I won’t be able to be a normal human being. I have to be celibate for the rest of my life. I betrayed my morals, my parents’ trust, and I betrayed God and all my values for a few seconds of pleasure. I’m a disgusting person that doesn’t deserve to live, and I don’t want to pollute anyone else’s life with my presence.",1.3984375,2.741806968750001,3.962916666666669,88.02375000000002,78.27083333333334,6.0500000000000025,23.458333333333336,6.6274283507984215,0.7016083333333336,343,11,74,3,8,121,59,96,0.152,0.713,0.135,-0.5574,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,6,0,12,2,0,0,3,11,16,5,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,0,13,2,10,7,3,4,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,54,14,0,0.5120366627875429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17901397003322886,0.2623210353595844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138704643247441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23158323807175385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24135129779005066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047612473352652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616666376499693,0.0,0.0,0.22606887709396695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19745712020036696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508436069272003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842780592859554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22354533188565254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100624506228724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WonderbreadGuy,2020/03/09,"How do I make it out of the deep dark holes I dig in my mind I have dark thoughts, I get down I don’t know how to feel, I think it’s depression idk. I’m stuck mentally in my mind and feel like it drags me down, maybe even down to the lowest point where I feel like taking my life will be the solution to it going away. How can I just be happy and never have these thoughts again?",1.9989285714285716,2.5952991309523843,3.2152380952380963,96.94642857142858,75.54761904761905,7.028571428571429,19.952380952380953,7.1686216300943375,-0.029676190476190637,293,5,76,3,6,95,52,84,0.132,0.741,0.127,0.1531,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,3,0,8,1,0,4,1,18,21,5,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,3,12,3,11,15,0,13,0,1,0,0,0,10,0,0,4,49,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029934863188576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18609033166368985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14270418914506774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32773606115218723,0.30870357900160034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288132254232518,0.0,0.1227906697605735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22999762615868746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873975802952075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15260806712850292,0.21110992902903733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422030968153954,0.0,0.21705917619494028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21773552125259985,0.0,0.4363137263631287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666371532101478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20424452852136749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624486337186644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844116265140435,0.0,0.34305163865890514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DianaInTheWoods,2020/03/09,"Insomnia related to mood disorder coming to a head Hi there-- my most recent bout of depression in going on into month 6 and the biggest thing that is breaking me down is insomnia. I've never had it this bad. I haven't had more than 5 hours/night for months (with the average being 3 hours), even with a couple of work-related all-nighters in December. I see my therapist on Wednesday and I'm trying to find a doctor to talk to (even though our insurance is crap and one appt will cost $200+ out of pocket to just \*talk\* about a sleep study), but wondered what anyone else has done to silence the voices. It's a sinister combination of anxiety about work projects and a never-ending cycle of self-abuse over all my missteps and failures just reminding me of how I've failed to live up to myself and how I just need to give up. These are the things I've already tried:

\-Reset after an all-nighter (they do this in clinics)

\-Listen to meditation and sleep hypnosis YouTube videos (Michael Sealey)

\-Listen to the Sleep with Me Podcast

\-Limit blue light

\-Limit alcohol/caffeine

\-Work out in the evening

\-read a paper book by dim light

\-journaling

\-calming music

\-warm shower

\-herbal tea

\-Melatonin

\-Over-the-counter sleeping pills that are basically Benadryl

\-sex

\-weed (I live in a rec state)

\-comforting space

\-fan

\-humidifier

\-comfortable blankets

Husband just bought me a weighted blanket in hopes that it helps. I broke down this morning because it's just torture at this point.",6.599351196172247,8.111853432727276,6.274373205741629,75.85766507177034,65.58181818181818,9.280382775119618,35.928229665071775,9.549672527348893,3.602527272727272,1214,59,203,24,19,378,180,275,0.124,0.85,0.026000000000000002,-0.9785,1,0,1,0,1,0,75.0,1,0,1,5,14,12,2,0,16,0,13,14,6,2,2,31,24,11,0,2,6,1,2,0,0,1,5,3,1,0,15,14,2,2,2,3,2,2,2,6,0,1,4,9,15,5,44,18,3,31,0,3,2,1,10,20,1,3,7,128,30,8,0.0,0.13454338601702162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135511099605145,0.0,0.0,0.125310095326112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686879909934897,0.0,0.0,0.07939987118621225,0.11634989388324643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481317418413576,0.0692217034144505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978170539503242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564577495434434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780423147205848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13014317117017882,0.11622773196557905,0.0,0.11620556830080098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486012356894824,0.0,0.10057548661913046,0.0,0.0,0.22500481495836805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378665711423543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893172003407377,0.06453557785890883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653956667699372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611311536124858,0.0,0.0,0.11278513329994573,0.11182820237002523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005412171702661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812760647101137,0.0,0.0,0.0841991428559467,0.1751602950965154,0.0,0.0,0.31968931363508485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694739485776665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734560450193993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358512147220702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212126283658708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048814852000207,0.0,0.11846199619147972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4545455986596687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18254143791731733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184540136363773,0.1508809846735404,0.0,0.11156661363317252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15419195657960158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827865777464682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231448942624382,0.2480068494964552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,txyq,2020/03/09,"Hello, everyone! Deeply sorry if this breaks the rules, but... If anyone wants to vent or just have a conversation, please PM me. I don't know much about mental health (or anything, really), but I want to support you guys in any way I can.",2.955217391304348,4.8901473478260895,4.029782608695655,86.65380434782612,75.52173913043478,7.208695652173913,20.195652173913047,8.07648339933343,0.8073652173913041,182,4,37,3,4,59,40,46,0.028999999999999998,0.818,0.153,0.6854,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,10,7,6,0,4,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,4,7,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,4,0,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19091456965282272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19630172737211707,0.0,0.23102720821789416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26826154953957193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27797927527449445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984162159486988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15428877036247465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829224717633668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063780861773897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30817102834510723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17985087443716374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142683141185523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185833331088562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3311784744419876,0.22284037871539253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brielarstan,2020/03/09,"Does anyone else suffer from immense sadness one random day a week? I know I can't ask for a diagnosis online and that I should go to a doctor or therapist for these issues. However, I feel like I'm going insane and just want to know if anyone has this issue and if so do you have a diagnosis yourself?

I moved from a very sunny country to the UK and experienced extreme seasonal affective disorder. I didn't see the sun for two months at one point and it took an immense toll on my mental health. I would sleep for mere hours before heading to class. Couldn't properly bathe and clean my room. Skipped lectures and left social events 30 minutes in.

Now that it is getting sunny again, I am a completely new person. I feel like myself. I'm going on dates. My grades are awesome. The only thing is... one random day a week I get a crippling wave of depression. I can actually feel it coming - usually the night before. I start to get lethargic, have negative thoughts, immediately curl up in bed and sometimes cry. Then the next day I can't leave my room. I usually spend all day under my covers not eating; too sad to even turn on my phone. Then the next day I am completely normal.

This day comes at random. Sometimes on Monday. Sometimes Thursday. It doesn't matter. I'm only typing this now because it's happening right now and I just want to know if this is normal for getting over seasonal affective disorder or like... something completely random? Once again, I know no one can diagnose me but any input is appreciated!

**tl;dr:** Getting over seasonal affective disorder and one random day a week I get hit with crippling depression. Just need advice. I will see a doctor/therapist for it.",3.232634345794392,5.776540327102808,4.753963200934582,78.84580461448601,77.19314641744549,7.626207165109034,26.54215342679128,8.567472430010655,2.328455529595016,1339,53,232,29,32,447,168,321,0.09699999999999999,0.833,0.07,-0.8616,1,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,1,0,0,11,8,0,0,17,0,21,6,2,3,1,49,54,19,0,11,10,0,3,3,0,3,3,0,5,1,14,13,1,0,8,1,1,7,8,5,0,6,3,6,28,3,29,46,1,57,2,5,2,0,5,17,0,10,36,148,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.0748603996513674,0.0,0.0,0.07496263281495373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052167176271581336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727842126307542,0.07860109055245228,0.0,0.0,0.07171589488228013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046763268935457715,0.0,0.13055348905317735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216216806933656,0.2412950015263202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842651529076935,0.3463128169323115,0.0,0.13214484341622973,0.07786164090556824,0.0,0.0,0.26375774417625364,0.15703712620657745,0.06713168450015658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849610754329157,0.06408350634115483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05066792713201052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11636453676990813,0.10960694664922203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404749009571953,0.0,0.1307925593185266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783666981424401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872922550762146,0.08154187167592047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554642610696859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16013597918023414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16863688287094009,0.0,0.0,0.0812275322282593,0.08334842870406657,0.0,0.0,0.11243365627494133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730822473376814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123123924620756,0.08153331858631284,0.0,0.05688139654601008,0.0,0.07408947541319967,0.16316937097195486,0.07198954765097804,0.1503240564414632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169638042430268,0.2599121043058171,0.11668672828919335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06698245472398479,0.0,0.0,0.07251817168248959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551211322534678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225996807322538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676796808323476,0.07819880160336919,0.0,0.059057082055684815,0.2276120714426537,0.0,0.05429754989071305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17813840624396018,0.05096442095112125,0.0,0.0,0.060901209467707364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852304847635515,0.0,0.08344124452869975,0.07493703136742894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16897610976807168,0.06329590191729781,0.0904941193591776,0.0,0.18460258249441994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054494406736899585,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Satansbaby28,2020/03/09,"I always put everyone before me and I never ask for help I’m the type of person who most people come to when they want to tell their problems or ask for an advice and I am happy to help them. I always go out of my way to help them and I devote a lot of my time and energy into helping them. I am always there and and answer them even if it’s early in the morning and I need to sleep.
   But when it comes to me, I rarely go to someone for help because I don’t want to come off as annoying or to disturb them from what they’re doing so I just hide it away and hope it just dies eventually. Even if , for example, I am saving money to buy myself something I’ve been wanting for sooo long, I just go and get something for someone close to me because I know they’ve been wanting it or even dreaming about it. I feel happy that I can do that to someone but when it comes to me I feel selfish. 
   I am so used to hiding my problems and my pain away that I find it hard even talking face to face about it with the only person close to me. I feel selfish and that I make them feel bad if I start pouring out. I may be overthinking this but I finally feel just a little better saying all of this, even if maybe no one will read it.
   So thank you and I hope you’re all taking care of yourselves and have a great day. ^^",2.893605823068309,3.3064686666666674,4.5090593505039225,89.17026315789477,73.32624113475177,6.9297499066815975,24.061963419186267,6.5966054737557815,0.6157134751773046,1012,26,230,7,19,342,133,282,0.14300000000000002,0.74,0.11699999999999999,-0.758,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,8,1,19,18,1,1,7,0,14,4,3,2,3,63,44,30,1,13,14,0,6,0,0,2,1,1,0,2,18,23,0,0,8,2,2,8,3,8,0,1,2,7,43,10,39,39,4,29,0,0,0,0,22,10,0,12,10,168,61,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099677395659783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324524221220113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17411114926572244,0.0,0.17498050989973055,0.0,0.07775215430371375,0.11353140766268766,0.0,0.07923912145630581,0.0,0.0,0.08235796660407023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494307664316336,0.0,0.0,0.32086202103137096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06005534822063247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664490724033213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075277467549935,0.0,0.0,0.08898111637878382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354239050264358,0.0,0.0,0.10200951555060124,0.085110916790326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048651884685565625,0.0,0.1587684491404189,0.0,0.0,0.10266624309089907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982580950295057,0.08341813479573501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120852529739672,0.0,0.0,0.1849803503144311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05117687217987848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333171653241612,0.0,0.08240916416079669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916815329537706,0.0,0.0,0.06215899776787195,0.0,0.09355257160652486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690480495343589,0.07182066421370302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310120687058399,0.07082272486398418,0.09908732095064852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0645583838209144,0.16261934947302464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17820846202890114,0.0,0.09361233599309933,0.0,0.0,0.09314621061163464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405356534702684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318826162391562,0.0,0.23670339064192786,0.1433782071028162,0.0,0.0,0.06591153069555324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001541102643205,0.07484714107453555,0.08139186786462585,0.08573331549037264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05429961022394203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042665464209157,0.0,0.0,0.21970073927514974,0.07391512390202473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dan_96v,2020/03/09,"What’s going on with me? TL;DR I’m having weird symptoms and I’d like to know what’s going on with me
To give you background information, I’ve been a drug user for almost 2 years, I’m a 18 yo male, I tried almost every drug you can think of but only a couple of times, the regulars are only hash and pregabalin, now I don’t know how long this issue has been going on for because i used to always be high which covered up the symptoms, but I realized how bad it is when I became kinda sober, I used to smoke almost all day and take lyrica a couple of times a month which became a couple of times a week in my last couple months of abuse. Now I’ve been sober from lyrica for around 2 months but I still occasionally smoke hash to relieve my symptoms. I have all the physical symptoms of anxiety and the most prominent ones are goosebumps, sweating hands and feet, and jittery feeling, the weird thing is these symptoms go away when I’m sitting in a restaurant or when I’m sitting on the toilet, but when I get in bed, my hands and feet start sweating and I get goosebumps, the symptoms worsen during stressful occasions, I’ve been to the top psychiatrist in my city and he suspected it’s anxiety caused by drug abuse and he prescribed me flupentixol for two weeks and told me to see him if I don’t feel better, after two weeks of no improvement I went and I saw him and he prescribed me escilatopram, he said he could not give me a clear diagnosis because I don’t have all the symptoms of anxiety. Idk what to do I can’t take this; every night I wake up several times from embarrassing dreams soaked in sweat and the sheets are drenched in sweat, I’m suspecting it is social anxiety worsened by drug abuse. This has been going on for at least 3-4 months but i didn’t feel it until now because I almost completely stopped my drug use. I want to know what’s wrong with me and why do these symptoms go away when I’m sitting on the toilet but come back when I lay back in bed??",6.088784090909094,5.5768126375000024,6.604909090909093,80.09245454545454,66.375,9.472727272727274,31.181818181818183,8.841846274778883,2.33205,1565,52,316,22,22,512,172,400,0.166,0.773,0.061,-0.9925,0,0,7,0,3,0,28.0,0,2,0,2,15,9,0,2,20,0,26,24,11,6,4,59,62,32,0,3,9,0,5,1,0,0,13,1,2,1,16,20,0,1,11,1,0,8,7,6,0,3,10,8,36,3,50,50,5,64,0,0,2,0,16,21,0,8,33,195,52,0,0.0,0.22240428774347806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250617725938288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052062932213679095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19146233754295192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557002230780645,0.0,0.0,0.11757242633732963,0.09622434383069413,0.05224301517740718,0.11442557007100625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05533773999971759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427623042872449,0.0,0.05389818322305572,0.06560305112554389,0.0,0.0,0.04995674642037912,0.27692835660870485,0.0,0.0403522255643162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3628044456081942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543519886307408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491123239140724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538008297774114,0.12004495265581767,0.21335852549464665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610823379433686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530642219739898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315987257080726,0.05100258746280133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030568353485068925,0.0,0.0,0.05537214052221192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997698796911646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587173453056806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04239879059010421,0.09517402374528756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951803237567047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049859882418079975,0.0,0.0,0.07068585547014182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637818431433505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04428709569953943,0.0,0.04996817554229697,0.05231100000911278,0.07167328283834833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5202703015635621,0.09408912752740486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04156847210374704,0.04009208298516331,0.0,0.0,0.1459393832343602,0.0,0.0,0.059787948708417984,0.0,0.04248066155963631,0.0,0.12224284470619713,0.0,0.0,0.16212017442200385,0.0,0.0,0.03690518018190463,0.0,0.1505687135748794,0.0,0.0,0.0580026601707332,0.05645934565851049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841005190461448,0.0,0.040292780778794
mentalhealth,lncm-me,2020/03/09,"I'm Scared To Start Feeling Again... Likely to protect myself, my brain has just...given up on emotions for the whole of my life. I'm twenty, and as a kid, I had some *shit* things happen. To cope, I basically became a brick of a person. But now I'm seeing a therapist, and I'm beginning to explore feeling things.

And I *fucking hate it.*

I used to feel anxiety, and anger. Anger, I could shove down (similarly to what I'm doing with the rest of my emotions, I assume). But anxiety was always there, ready to pounce.

Now, I'm talking about things that happened. Things I don't *want* to explore. And I hate it. I hate feeling paranoia, and anger, and frustration, and depression, and so much more. It's overwhelming. Even the good things I'm feeling more, but it's *so much to feel*.

Deadass. This might sound stupid, or like I'm a goddamn AI who is becoming human, but it's true. It's overwhelming, and exhausting, and while I like the good stuff, I'm *terrified* of the bad things.

And the thing is, is that it'll keep getting ""worse"". We've only *just* began to discuss things. It'll only become more and more intense.

I don't know what to even do...",0.6331130690161544,3.109021246696038,2.3319251101321576,91.82091262848749,89.83700440528635,5.317415565345081,21.223054331864905,6.88968998030894,0.6621730983847294,881,31,181,13,30,288,114,227,0.17800000000000002,0.706,0.11599999999999999,-0.9389,0,0,0,0,0,0,66.0,0,0,0,0,10,22,10,3,11,0,14,5,2,1,1,37,44,22,0,2,6,0,6,3,0,3,2,1,0,3,23,14,0,2,10,0,0,2,2,16,0,0,3,8,15,6,22,37,9,12,0,3,1,1,6,3,2,4,10,120,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683395898069522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596666962236956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713431311021885,0.0,0.23050974187810705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649769651561898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833211247432667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988312649505825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347767128287534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13785454160489954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165983055451994,0.07455315542943954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647700389691803,0.054522586435805716,0.0,0.0,0.17506056028649367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845663233248291,0.0,0.0,0.3090948443971415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275791086555593,0.0,0.0,0.05735225788219976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371092350282496,0.15295168979739798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070701883100212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342982113180745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15873745335754694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112111067310856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448025421591206,0.0,0.08315956863329138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712167033421978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386491094209878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946458904030305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387875917004396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211673228263664,0.5546449034768064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013153874318718,0.0,0.0,0.06155287007151481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651163537258152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634940283768217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pag32,2020/03/09,How to help a friend How can I help a friend who has depression? I want him to know I'm there for him,-0.12250000000000227,0.843105083333338,1.8733333333333315,103.005,81.5,6.466666666666668,16.166666666666668,7.1686216300943375,-0.6556833333333336,78,1,23,1,2,26,16,24,0.124,0.436,0.44,0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,4,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,3,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647316653596486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6543393923308994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5676822547161509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232726489889744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24977191698025755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThomAngelesMusic,2020/03/09,"I don't know if this makes sense, but in a meta-sense, I just don't want to exist as myself. I'm praying for a car to hit me soon. It doesn't matter if things get better. The past is always going to be there. My personality is only going to be there. I'm always going to be disgusted by my body, my voice, my eyes, my dark skin color, and every other terrible, awful thing about myself.

I just don't want to be me. Everyone else is just so much better. They get people romantically interested in them, they have people reaching out to them ***wanting*** to be their friends, they have personalities that draw others and cause them to be liked by professors and others and just ugh. I'm just the worse. The fact that I'm alive is something I feel the need to apologize for. I'm adopted and was never meant to be born, and boy would the world be much better without me.

I was always the good kid who kept his head down and did his work. Now I'm just a boring pushover. A creepy, unlikable piece of shit who can't ever achieve anything he wants.

I don't get it. Why did I have to be me? Why can't I just die tomorrow? Why can't a car just hit me?",1.0226190476190489,3.0550513109243687,3.1018697478991624,90.48639005602243,82.10924369747899,5.815406162464986,18.74019607843137,6.996647511020387,0.14260448179271726,884,21,195,11,24,299,121,238,0.122,0.706,0.17300000000000001,0.938,0,0,1,0,2,0,37.0,0,0,7,5,15,12,2,0,11,1,29,5,5,2,3,36,53,12,1,8,12,0,2,1,1,1,0,1,0,4,12,8,0,1,3,0,0,5,10,5,0,0,6,5,29,7,24,35,3,17,1,0,2,0,18,5,1,2,8,133,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32639860275883725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760111373024177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34692938426149506,0.0,0.14524052942250126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343225138660714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357041686166832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922992763217036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11827636141936736,0.11016763791835747,0.12494303906505247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611420346166533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102182402081687,0.0,0.20494396708782234,0.0,0.22293508275177126,0.10967199727392728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419346249491348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186012268915913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388081655495154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728069957332542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19224152941552056,0.09695397744407347,0.10084715071826526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09944589188683296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482147491402895,0.18129960602823825,0.2283423333041716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342192383898076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066241951194316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.173737060599363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3084932979827279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3539610765675273,0.0,0.0,0.1260441962852939,0.0,0.0951919844488726,0.0,0.13325161760033444,0.09288536854617953,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Underoath4177,2020/03/10,"Is anyone else about to lose all of their marbles over this coronavirus? For a person with controlled (for now) anxiety/depression, i kept it cool for a while. But every day that passes (more like every hour) i feel like I'm getting closer and closer to a full blown mental breakdown. 

Idk who to listen to. 

One person says sanitizer works but soap and water is better, while the other says sanitizer is completely useless. 

In the US they're telling us masks are ineffective, yet every other country is wearing them.

Apparently we can only get TESTED if we've traveled abroad or are sick enough to be admitted into the hospital. 

I clearly don't have enough xanax for this shit.",5.899324444444448,7.516906968000004,6.441066666666668,73.6209777777778,67.32,8.755555555555556,29.88888888888889,9.150863307647796,2.7683422222222216,541,20,88,10,9,176,92,125,0.142,0.753,0.10400000000000001,-0.7972,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,3,0,2,5,3,8,1,0,6,1,10,5,2,1,2,15,17,8,0,1,4,0,1,2,0,0,2,3,0,2,7,5,1,2,2,1,0,2,1,4,0,1,1,5,8,4,15,15,5,14,0,2,0,0,13,6,1,2,8,62,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343636566140278,0.16622582518115256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14348099402138945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700971341868516,0.0,0.18195694946998686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10462619967806704,0.0,0.13973015823259255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552399396992518,0.0,0.0,0.33525798516000954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4100622957621853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202935867025353,0.11589855194308794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951901712818584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15976581152824768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851669199563545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814960773491465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16349166861858092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099325816197758,0.1233847238074673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833093976405697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25802674847230184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665287860982794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14179789263880335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39029017016625744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810680649608599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FluidLine,2020/03/10,"I don't know what's going on I'm 14 in school I and recently I've been feeling extremely anxious and scared all the time, I don't want to tell my parents because I don't want to upset them, Im constantly doubting myself on my own feelings because I was bullied pretty bad in primary school but this is unlike anything I've felt before, I don't want to tell myself there's anything wrong because of it, I keep telling myself it will all blow over but ik it won't unless I tell someone, I've never pulled more than 1 sick day a year this year so far I've pulled 3 and been late almost everyday. I just want to feel happy again, I don't want to look pathetic and I don't want to tell anyone just to find out this is only the tip of the iceberg please tell me what's going on",4.2370059880239515,4.0456374011976095,5.5493473053892215,85.02102694610781,70.19760479041916,8.117125748502994,28.67604790419161,7.554174236665415,1.5614914970059877,614,20,133,6,10,207,91,167,0.196,0.725,0.08,-0.9314,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,5,6,0,3,4,0,13,1,0,0,3,28,29,8,0,6,5,1,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,6,0,0,4,8,5,0,0,4,5,18,1,18,23,4,22,0,0,1,0,8,8,0,2,10,77,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11396348254634725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857201103370866,0.0,0.07957804473699885,0.0,0.18731056274585708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502593523340896,0.20813111137803564,0.0,0.09684325393797467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298732286139047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339752424275996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726360661137573,0.0,0.10927468776939203,0.0,0.10401955468631016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293607917811362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115201865778395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293347487319005,0.0,0.0,0.10115885367853908,0.0,0.0,0.06254656459057492,0.0,0.12838174430027172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557107150783303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777667766391106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655703145780297,0.0,0.0,0.12637165756061267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12492833460301613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157848801322566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11237286328907928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394287182516387,0.2303619898494369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964301729861899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5968455871217471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663630646706494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.402765718996199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443250336005343,0.0,0.1465787977075044
mentalhealth,AndAnotherHuman,2020/03/10,"I just got told I got IED by some dude on reddit, suggestions? While I admit I was just throwing insults I was triggered because of a similar experience the happened to me that op is going through. I’ll edit this post with a link to the thread in a minute.",3.3665384615384615,4.764211038461539,4.910769230769233,83.0092307692308,73.23076923076924,7.507692307692308,30.30769230769231,8.07648339933343,2.1443692307692306,202,9,40,3,4,68,40,52,0.061,0.899,0.039,-0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,5,0,3,0,0,1,0,7,9,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,0,6,0,8,4,1,6,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,28,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23338340291049076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3745033248434529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175839661056776,0.0,0.6124044270121736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33855530641398845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666669785710235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3658320840512224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Daniisqueen,2020/03/10,"I'm 20, I'm in my first year of college, I think I'm gonna get kicked out and it's my own fault. Like I said in the title I'm in the first year of 'college', I'm not from America so I don't really know how to call I other than that even though as far as I know it's not exactly the same.

The way my education works is that the first year is split up into four periods, you get grades for each period and if you get low grades for more than one period, they kick you out. I got bad grades in the second period so if my grades in the third are too low, they'll kick me out. You get grades for your homework and I'm really far behind.   


  


I have always had really bad anxiety, it's caused me to struggle in the past and it's the reason why I'm only in my first year at 20 years old, I already feel like a failure because I'm so old already. But now I feel even worse.

  


I can't bring myself to do anything, even things I really need to do, even things I want to do for myself. I've noticed my mental health getting worse so I decided I wanted to get back into therapy, my parents supported me, the only thing I had to do was apply to the same place I got therapy in the past. Two months have gone by and I still haven't done it. Behaviour like this is why I'm behind on homework for my education.

  


I don't get why I'm like this. I've always been like this. I don't understand why I can't just force myself to do it. I feel like really I'm just lazy and I'm making excuses for myself. But it feels impossible to not be lazy. And while I'm slacking of and being lazy, I'm constantly thinking, ""you should do your homework!!"", But somehow I don't do it.

  


I fucking hate myself, and I don't know what I'm gonna do, I don't have any faith in myself that I'll be able to catch up. I think I'm going to get kicked out and then what? I'll be even more of a failure.

  


TL;DR:

I'm lazy and can't bring myself to do anything, which is why I'm probably going to get kicked out of college. I feel like a failure and I don't know what to do with my life.",1.0276435063381977,2.187596130530977,3.584943793350873,91.11872638124856,78.84513274336283,7.0103802917962215,20.623295862233924,7.730073105063049,0.5435026787849795,1569,38,379,24,37,552,158,452,0.122,0.828,0.049,-0.985,1,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,7,2,5,18,17,2,1,15,0,40,3,0,4,1,57,97,27,0,6,10,1,5,7,0,4,2,1,3,0,22,21,0,0,15,0,0,6,14,8,0,9,9,6,56,9,55,80,6,56,1,2,0,1,13,25,1,3,31,242,78,12,0.07318593368106792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16152499540117218,0.0,0.1217931192511164,0.0,0.0,0.04976894455572842,0.0,0.055987038947307485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12045157514767076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056275465502656455,0.12221439529039925,0.044613465884701664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473102096629823,0.0,0.0,0.07518211388371468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908799452996827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489461976917905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24169309481683005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18502503530205053,0.15685213693498778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490076712082593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765921638572331,0.3441296673930598,0.0,0.08318650536290886,0.0,0.11706695365405415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225595777940524,0.0,0.07779322517442806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608843006943966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051693389324131464,0.2502846530258781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04885217903020148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375420763520786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05841631402969302,0.0,0.0,0.05426644248891342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332267056899822,0.15359265239822956,0.0,0.04959268272914245,0.11132240089785814,0.0,0.0,0.08126431838150314,0.0,0.13972850971917608,0.0,0.0,0.0764637238647657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890681476544165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344239157451369,0.07524732892417993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06961658234087377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058446381175825374,0.0,0.0,0.07650982825326758,0.0,0.0,0.08305053024872372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167388986763333,0.0,0.14586444706685692,0.14068377355303952,0.07190480825636794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714920228743176,0.07618913800256852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633391973450312,0.05809158763122151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301946090168671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05328023136008074,0.0,0.14916543774048638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356467089775908
mentalhealth,blossyTwT,2020/03/10,"11 years old , hating my sexuality , been always depressed and lonely and have always wanted to kill people Here’s a history check that maybe help find an answer to what Tf is going on with me ( I’ve never done this before so maybe I’ll make mistakes here and there)


Born to a family of Muslim parents and 1 fellow atheist older sibling 
Mother is a huge nicotine addict 
Been really quiet and afraid of socializing 
Parents divorced when I was 4 
Abusive father , attention whore mother 
Mother took advantage of my innocence and forced me to give her pleasure by making me suck her tits 
I don’t know why but I thought she was just feeding me breast milk... 
I didn’t understand it back then but now I’m disgusted and realized what was happening to me.
I feel like it may have to do something with why I’m sexually hungry for females as a female myself. 
I have an urge to kill animals, Pets , people and myself. 
I don’t wanna be a murderer 
I wanna be an artist , but the thought of killing has stuck to me

I don’t wanna grow up to be a serial killer , but at the same time I enjoy thinking about it 
Also fantasize about doing harmful stuff , cutting , and also doing drugs , drink , and smoke.
 I feel like this isn’t a simple depression, I wanna kill 


I want to get help but because dad (who I live with rn)
Has no understanding in mental health ( neither does my mom) 
I am not normal , please someone I’m begging , I don’t wanna be a monster , I wanna get this demon out of me",3.9129915067631353,5.384899086505194,5.579548600188744,78.45730025165147,71.9757785467128,7.884303240012582,26.97719408619063,8.438071523408619,2.0238913494809694,1152,40,209,19,22,393,170,289,0.228,0.693,0.079,-0.9943,2,2,4,0,1,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,12,21,9,1,13,0,28,9,2,2,1,48,52,21,5,10,7,8,2,2,1,1,3,1,1,0,11,14,3,0,12,2,1,3,10,16,0,0,11,3,32,5,34,36,2,19,1,3,0,3,18,6,2,1,12,149,43,0,0.0,0.1270161563684494,0.0,0.11686537442860075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17145787824142006,0.17840034307287936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243127702115956,0.0,0.06534899236048608,0.0,0.09122051508574014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18466485683033654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381268755189416,0.10970427511250327,0.0,0.10501658238308363,0.12431961630440368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105996077875268,0.0,0.1084085208685707,0.15316943580488612,0.0,0.0,0.09798015836551482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201663772500473,0.1028373730952602,0.06092503906225731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479786418631936,0.0,0.0,0.10583921108324204,0.0,0.11395009952285548,0.0,0.0,0.14370970805196015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.474409964676341,0.0,0.0589150984378322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474640050097887,0.0,0.0946608203958652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431155643674144,0.0,0.21539647620269425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803382018700412,0.0,0.0,0.12555301079885572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268034605843813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503463337377897,0.0,0.0,0.11248986005860298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23806898727919665,0.0,0.0,0.14863993736967604,0.0,0.0,0.1176749703039682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06867597652572124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092783503999862,0.0908314176973144,0.08252889269602065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271998144521296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869034315724001,0.0,0.17021191045230405,0.06251001175365425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191047252359783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22320092369192826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646035337764458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193465220011218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903420157737983
mentalhealth,jodoji,2020/03/10,"Advice on English crisis hotline while traveling abroad Hi, I'm looking for a best option for crisis hotline or suicide prevention hotline that I can call when I am in Mexico and Nicaragua. 

I don't speak Spanish, so I am looking for something in English. 

It could be an international call, but preferably something I can access without extra cost or potential difficulties with my cell provider when I need it.   


Does anyone have experience with this? Maybe some online service?",7.504497991967874,9.546888867469884,7.291746987951808,67.4230823293173,63.93975903614458,8.90682730923695,40.339357429718866,9.2995712137729,4.38022248995984,388,22,54,7,6,123,61,83,0.133,0.835,0.031,-0.8131,0,0,2,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,0,0,13,12,8,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,1,1,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,9,10,3,7,0,0,2,0,5,3,0,4,3,41,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23063239848221434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16502808580885978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476845475972895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4819980645033354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18843981209517952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065394561133113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23086923105119894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3963885024258804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371100978160283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750030971671968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633937595411265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581635270762556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275112925882843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,verydumbandsad,2020/03/10,"does anyone have advice for talking to parents about mental health? for the past month, i’ve been trying to tell my mother that i think i need professional help but i always decide not to at the last second.
my grandad has dementia and it’s getting really bad so i think thats another reason i keep postponing the conversation besides being afraid that they won’t react well. 
can you tell me how talked to ur parents or someone about it? 
-
(they’re desi parents btw and i’m 19 and live with them)",3.235899198167239,5.51894163917526,4.4277663230240565,82.5141122565865,75.90721649484536,6.785337915234822,24.179839633447884,7.793537801064563,1.4349825887743417,397,13,72,6,9,130,73,97,0.078,0.8740000000000001,0.048,-0.5858,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,2,0,5,3,0,1,3,0,6,1,0,3,0,15,12,7,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,11,1,10,9,0,4,0,0,0,0,14,1,0,1,3,45,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824998272525238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14326557710395893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18054325256114265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12039059893254048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376112525363302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506738001765501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995570284504435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18301676429541816,0.0,0.0,0.11540703288387028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303938444250645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034774485355522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203599757213127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17351454968350213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743053783678094,0.0,0.0,0.12766752749838473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5735486311118115,0.0,0.16436302564449182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030139562137548,0.17702727494197484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14588554317141056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767797064724855,0.30098166708043844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22064894011713374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689730553632187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480836283799035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pickleknowing,2020/03/10,"TRIGGER WARNING So....I’ve reached a point where the world has failed me and I have nothing left. Nobody knows how to help me anymore. I’ll never achieve what I want. And I’m ready to give up. I have 4,500mg of seroquel and 295mg of oxy and if my calculations are correct, I will die.  But I’m scared because I don’t know what to expect and how it will make me feel as I’m loosing consciousness.",0.7159303882195474,2.8809844216867475,2.0813654618473905,96.56601070950472,84.30120481927709,4.6527443105756365,23.680053547523432,5.82211442006289,0.2505700133868811,309,12,70,2,9,99,59,83,0.17600000000000002,0.743,0.08,-0.8340000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,1,2,0,7,0,0,4,2,19,16,10,1,3,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,9,0,7,14,0,6,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,1,1,39,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.303877390240306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867853097908196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180062558939492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15493061501774846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939373645688666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053808434440714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3367909592962932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3329164626526495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045317307939027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363230632072544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940096313495593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896574484960153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30677087829020583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18072915456445887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheCeilingFerret,2020/03/10,"I cover pictures eyes Since I was young I would turn figures, teddy bears and pictures away when I'd go to sleep or change clothes. Now as a 23yr old woman I still find myself covering the eyes on the pictures hanging on my walls. I feel really uneasy if I don't and now people are starting to question it? Is this a phobia? What's wrong with me??",2.5969483568075127,4.307303647887324,3.8165492957746494,88.77627934272303,75.90140845070422,5.860093896713615,24.509389671361504,6.42735559955562,0.7595896713615025,273,9,55,2,6,89,56,71,0.149,0.851,0.0,-0.8736,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,5,3,3,0,0,10,9,6,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,3,9,0,7,7,0,13,0,0,2,0,2,4,0,3,7,36,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671275681025338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007723750716573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376050283303127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25986290969440023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615853473608538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.298345530703214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971113706388552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185029556302173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18214237845485526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23519206248565475,0.0,0.2845248732851885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012428345843534,0.0,0.2270579528032808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092580163193288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20197244448044727,0.3108587849776416,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,basicallybald,2020/03/10,"18M losing my hair is destroying me I’m 18 M and and since about 16 my hairlines receded it’s quite obvious now and i’m starting to think. I’ve hated the way i look as it is before hand and although i’ve never struggled dating girls taht i find attractive and connect w well i feel like if i go bald no one will find me attractive at my age and it’s killing me inside i feel so useless and hate myself so much for it . i have bad anxiety attacks and body image issues now , i don’t want to take the risks of treatments and transplants . i feel so lost and robbed :(",-0.0030000000000001137,2.256234700000004,2.2800000000000007,92.965,89.5,5.2,21.333333333333336,6.742157984588678,0.5434333333333332,444,16,96,6,15,150,78,120,0.289,0.59,0.12,-0.977,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,3,7,15,5,2,2,0,5,4,4,0,2,20,19,16,1,2,1,0,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,10,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,11,1,1,1,6,15,4,7,17,1,9,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,1,7,55,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436102160040191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21356593137798274,0.0,0.0,0.15674373959099047,0.0,0.0,0.15974137733149374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20852175963907435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847603922495702,0.13411180926550784,0.0,0.0,0.3431571381449457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066892644119855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3706819970973552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959376349119139,0.0,0.0,0.2076914965508417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917136582204976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576429330378116,0.21001787252561308,0.2049255897171176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800053658858685,0.0,0.14478620675629222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720829700698874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19967018114051416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15528925457637885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287374344679626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962524392873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114692321469274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12028752539927008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072592062972376,0.14900851348091046,0.0,0.0,0.16878861839996842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yeetmageetle,2020/03/10,"Tips for dealing with ptsd-spurred paranoia? People who don't experience paranoia often say ""well think about how unlikely x is, you shouldn't be afraid of that!"" But like isn't that the whole thing with paranoia that it distorts perception of reality? That's like advising that someone just Not Have That Problem. I've been cataloguing coping tips and skills for various things I struggle with but I can't nail down good ones for paranoia that overlaps with ptsd.


I question what people are telling me, then I question who I can trust, I question myself for if I trusted them too much or did I trust myself too much to see the situation for what it is? Or may be? It just keeps spiraling, it stays within relative reality, so no supernatural extraterrestrial governmental conspiracy stuff, but it makes me afraid to say or do anything about it in case I make a wrong move or wrong judgement but also I am personally invested and affected by the situation so I can't escape it and the emotions consume me, so I have difficulty staying calm, I have bpd so I also will split on whoever I percieve to be the threat, and my confidence in my judgement is teetering on an edge and I can only find out how right or wrong I am by diving further into this situation.


A close friend I work with went from fine one hour to immediately fired by lunch, mass email sent out notifying personnel, but explicitly refusing to answer any questions about the matter, the general reason cited is sketchy, and every other person I talk with is either confused but keeping their head down, scared for their jobs if they voice dissent, or claiming knowledge they refuse to divulge and agreeing 100% with higher up's decisions. The accusations are vague, they refuse to clarify, and the person axed has shown for years to be trustworthy and take their job seriously. This person could end up homeless over this, and their supposed friends at the company insist they made the right call and care about said person, but when confronted by the financial insecurity the loss will cause, deflect until the topic changes.


The secrecy and 'he said she said' and 'no this didnt happen this happened"" all feels really gaslight-y and it's triggering my ptsd to such an extent that I feel unsafe even posting this for fear that a coworker will see it, connect the dots, and all of the sudden I'm the next employee fired for dubious reasons. My brain's stuck in fight or flight, and any and all actions and words make me feel unsafe. Any tips on what to do before I have my third meltdown would be helpful",8.16088906882591,8.116803016842109,7.980473684210527,70.38604655870448,61.98947368421052,11.097165991902832,37.21659919028341,10.64471489884176,4.019468016194331,2063,90,356,45,26,662,254,475,0.19899999999999998,0.698,0.10300000000000001,-0.9942,3,0,0,0,1,0,42.0,0,1,9,3,21,28,3,7,23,0,37,3,2,11,4,93,60,45,0,6,20,0,5,2,2,6,0,6,0,5,33,29,1,5,15,0,1,4,9,16,1,3,10,13,43,12,55,38,9,37,0,1,2,0,42,22,0,17,10,257,76,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294767619608073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15682507248034866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06325841402883238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541169450032258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968165337871838,0.08581363628851163,0.07849404807347365,0.0,0.07837526981830381,0.07896785545208901,0.08131949349456764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061375365416858466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925078955161757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646970732592059,0.06808503032571271,0.0,0.0,0.05077267554563325,0.0,0.06476726690291935,0.0,0.0,0.0751947439435965,0.0,0.08650142535540675,0.11660510316601973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025884670870668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878093354828545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447588106119391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359538241065673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889198648768254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0515251175187392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570260712201099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15256552783213914,0.13665323631239015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511073077298963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273734933458617,0.15393628668688536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08170187661232133,0.11301829358189144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175334970542142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417977359065804,0.05846398038420793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658556537017656,0.33560465500101083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736213211931977,0.0,0.0,0.07355531750837685,0.2695748137455005,0.0,0.3444531635885959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049245632868762865,0.1580727086985397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13129509957781196,0.21936622664796027,0.12226206207524565,0.07696144046430524,0.0,0.12251272239790635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25921921055203306,0.0,0.0,0.06513268358398808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16386885497106427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036242592903357,0.08799908581786095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057797544851641326,0.06178612579506905,0.06718878121973232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213956464335333,0.04925593478068499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911640381689338,0.07126033455366079,0.0,0.08582390382201174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055963119299949515,0.0,0.0,0.05460706582875725,0.2521396348653626,0.0,0.04950250609096983
mentalhealth,PositivePositivity,2020/03/10,"Time to see a doctor? I’ve been depressed for a couple years at least, mostly situational, I hate my job and status in life. Don’t have any real skills or talent.

I bit my fingers and skin to the point they bleed while worrying about the future.

I have intrusive thoughts that don’t feel like my own, even though my own mind is brining these things to me. Some of it is very inappropriate and graphic (worst of the worst stuff you could think about loved ones etc)

This stuff makes me stop enjoying the present, as I write this I’m on vacation with family and I try to hide from everyone even though I like them and know I’ll regret it 

I’ve got a mix of mental and social problems I think but like I said, I haven’t been diagnosed but I think it might be time to go and at least try to move forward.

I’m not here for a pity cry, just wanted someone else’s advice or opinion before I go and do that",2.6730645161290307,4.162881252688173,3.7739569892473135,90.09093548387098,75.18279569892474,6.895483870967742,22.07741935483871,7.554174236665415,0.6471509677419358,707,18,156,9,15,229,115,186,0.10800000000000001,0.8059999999999999,0.086,-0.45299999999999996,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,2,1,8,13,1,0,8,0,13,7,2,1,0,34,30,16,0,4,6,0,3,3,0,1,4,1,0,0,11,9,0,1,6,0,0,4,4,7,0,1,5,5,20,6,20,22,10,16,0,3,1,1,7,6,0,6,11,102,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030570700724364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068092369994632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346896483299042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558101520777314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646718806624256,0.1475465554533541,0.14647604964483227,0.0,0.0,0.11485207097260855,0.13534498170560896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364868934582821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139478814598937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487177949920285,0.1761496313456879,0.0,0.0,0.1274193224208314,0.0,0.0,0.1257082261029708,0.0,0.06742454057878525,0.0952635342417097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15156899976515303,0.0,0.10665023728001244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165312330310658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323268923435873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328433989318238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418733579620668,0.19544066853256356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035139269666405,0.0,0.08901054178983844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438299194047265,0.14146070435860095,0.1346430376542748,0.0,0.0,0.14172736901147073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035976789906416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605656014358216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759562031520674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177873387747315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12684408013585632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626075272590133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988826137207584,0.0,0.13593105988152435,0.11298496758914248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148454362975628,0.0,0.0,0.3053021405508132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859020361042975,0.25633122521010604,0.2620266308381849,0.10586307950089502,0.15551208669932193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18106850055403892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11002571468313402,0.07865185466607072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354209352828509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587146634388823
mentalhealth,kyle77745,2020/03/10,"I find myself frustrated by things I cannot change and can’t shake the awful feeling Today my girlfriend and I started a break. She’s not feeling the spark so much lately and I prescribed the break. 

I did this because I find myself trying harder and harder whenever I run into a wall or have someone pulling away. I think it’s my subconscious way of holding on to things because of my fear of loneliness and abandonment problems. and I am so tired of trying to change things that aren’t up to me, and being the one putting in all the effort to make things work. 

I find myself feeling a building frustration that I cannot shake when things aren’t the way they should be or the way I want them to be. 

How do I cope with this when the excitement of movies, gaming and even hot showers are overshadowed by it, and nothing seems worth doing until I resolve whatever is going on. which cannot be resolved in an instant or with words. 

I guess the real question is how do I get myself to relax and realize it’s going to be ok no matter what happens. 😕",4.784142173615859,5.624143904306222,5.476161995898838,82.39063397129188,69.28708133971291,7.885304169514698,29.76110731373889,7.957251820313856,1.9986169514695828,832,31,158,10,14,270,114,209,0.17,0.746,0.085,-0.9583,4,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,4,7,12,2,3,13,2,21,1,0,3,1,42,34,20,0,3,4,0,4,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,14,13,0,2,12,2,1,7,8,7,0,1,1,4,27,5,24,27,2,26,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,6,6,124,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276810205294057,0.0,0.0,0.16568480684870002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875249759430437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975961167169205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15292348227681582,0.20614294335764416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3726260274430331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710013051269723,0.0,0.1544683852751073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497074091879946,0.0,0.1201745065228944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532993147909635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071323743009807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09990096084842184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13039818023259622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208827308241506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13003641555202133,0.0,0.13661542763350862,0.15223731008133426,0.0,0.0,0.15468213142186155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371679959361565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151462735183113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618958715671737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4514242927016472,0.08707820753836014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561952196162314,0.12881579324682935,0.0,0.0,0.18453218631846946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801563974690395,0.32360947368741844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893565391851936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Snowjunji,2020/03/10,"Trapped in a pitiful world constructed by my mind  

English  is not my first language. So some of the things that characterizes me I  believe are: depression, sensitivity, sluggish cognitive tempo (sct),  social anxiety and asd(have diagnosis). I've convinced myself that my  version of reality is warped and greatly limited compared to the average  person. Dunno, maybe I'm just being delusional. I've completely  abandoned my ego because possessing one takes me to a place I like to  call the abyss. This basically gives me ignorant suffering. Okay, I'll  try to explain this the best I can. Several regions of my brain appear  to be inactive and it's always been like this since I've been born. Due  to this and the things I've listed before, without sufficient  self-awareness life can become quite miserable without me realizing it. I  reject my experience of reality and started considering the possibility  of everyone else being soulless except me. The perfect coping  mechanism! I can't validate my version of the world or other people's  existences. Even as I read your comments, it will literally turn into a  feedback loop to be interpreted by my brain. So I pay close attention to  my thoughts, feelings, inclinations, ambitions, point of view, emotions  and basically reject them. I have this constant need for  stimulation(think I may have inattentive adhd), otherwise I get bored,  completely empty and start feeling really . Though denying the very core  essence of my being requires so much brainpower due to things listed  above, and due to poor memory, I start doubting my belief. All I want to  do is turn into a recluse and live a life of self-indulgence completely  cutting myself off of society for good.

A  problem that I often have is falling victim to the flow of others (like  a toddler). Have I lost a part of my psyche? I don't know what to  believe, when to feel guility, when to feel happy, when to feel sad,  what to consider an accomplishment. The world I know has been created  thorugh the perspective of my mind. Something I deeply hate , and thus I  am a forsaken existence. I can't communicate with the outside world due  to the feedback loop thingy (Don't know how to interpret reality).  Although, I don't feel completly alone because I believe in God.",7.349032407407408,8.881878512500002,8.064777777777778,63.62896296296299,63.875,11.525925925925927,39.81481481481481,11.356394951697194,5.338112037037037,1815,100,271,56,27,606,221,400,0.16399999999999998,0.758,0.078,-0.9856,1,2,1,0,0,1,59.0,0,1,1,8,11,26,3,2,24,1,29,4,2,3,2,56,54,21,0,3,6,0,6,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,18,14,0,4,16,1,2,3,8,16,0,2,5,7,43,10,46,42,7,28,1,9,1,0,8,12,0,7,16,191,61,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052737506338844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525086297950212,0.0,0.0,0.07652454341820941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035508441074663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212538534599888,0.1015711650012011,0.07825778972250585,0.3108485147985094,0.09651448980010846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20533287068283548,0.09390936522171696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3857057849618903,0.09938447604398944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792116966308614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682726214822537,0.10345135109204584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060743837884823286,0.0,0.0,0.08787913554398118,0.0,0.08996211617399126,0.0,0.0,0.2790099756272931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822772938245846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04804935859146387,0.0882238552560181,0.0,0.0771381934194554,0.0,0.10139477969651156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790139028837594,0.0,0.09079912251715676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516292266282985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991909691097395,0.1347924056922432,0.0,0.08120921670456062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003936736789418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239397588248342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857224403845825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760688529391695,0.06819292846638465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062319734087883764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09959212151573424,0.0,0.06375886472527129,0.08030270037060025,0.09608673450168824,0.0,0.08693925948278944,0.10367983060341236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880007254744688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781903293047617,0.09199264743884232,0.0,0.05891690180532413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19188486149061,0.10389739083034057,0.0,0.0760766811568426,0.0,0.0,0.09374954919719904,0.0,0.07080127452213925,0.0,0.0,0.1952857609219726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691483097331249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18329787891754784,0.05892922689280429,0.09035785691714293,0.0730121282691852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062440071884781866,0.2000690265995539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588303335995282,0.054244967448164205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773072768643057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shegotsparkle,2020/03/10,"My dad passed away two weeks ago and I’m numb I was dad full time carer, I was taking care of him until the end. I was there with him when he passed. He was in extreme pain from his liver cancer, and all we could do was just make him comfortable. I know he’s at peace and not in pain anymore, but why can’t I cry? Why can’t I mourn him? Why can’t I grieve? When people used to pass I was the first to feel everyone’s pain and cry with the family members. Now I have nothing. I get a  memory of him, and I stop it so I don’t feel emotional pain because I can’t cry. I can’t look at his happy photos, I can’t look at his happy videos. I feel like as soon as I get an emotion boom this big wall comes up over my chest and it will not let the emotion through. He was the closest thing to me, he was even my best friend. I’m taking care of my mother who won’t stop cleaning to try and distract her self from him not being here. 

I don’t know what’s wrong with me.",0.6657571059431504,1.8503555162790728,2.6246124031007767,97.51976098191216,79.88372093023256,5.7080103359173116,18.456072351421188,6.139981653823899,-0.4426795865633073,736,14,188,5,18,247,111,215,0.20600000000000002,0.644,0.15,-0.9135,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,2,9,17,0,1,7,0,23,8,2,2,1,28,41,14,2,1,5,3,3,1,1,2,6,1,1,1,6,12,0,2,5,1,0,4,12,9,0,2,8,6,35,8,24,28,3,28,0,2,2,0,22,12,0,0,13,120,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437715036203437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055873029166804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000298645545475,0.0,0.0,0.06490169298108353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173123313517483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171017355578589,0.0,0.0,0.09171245564108346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500575744994697,0.0,0.35084915196373795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592853379099935,0.0942987391525996,0.0,0.0,0.07032088058788896,0.0,0.0,0.10173440487037788,0.0,0.0,0.10036822772968867,0.0,0.16149973282984442,0.0760605124701617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056133112623063,0.0,0.0,0.08225664448842843,0.0,0.1112499086488966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266735924361894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170236752747402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088703884445568,0.0,0.052014717294239086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17881202766293813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106798501306948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021585843592316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4531563566454832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381126495936109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106898165613044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780234501790867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010084976248554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707323777149455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06208214456773632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228454756570445,0.0,0.10400342648062776,0.0,0.0,0.09195386817690578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540192908743613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882114901425342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640566482067165,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PhoebeReeves25,2020/03/10,Anyone with experience of staying in a crisis house in the UK? Im really struggling at the moment and don't really know where to turn. My psych  mentioned a crisis care team which includes a crisis house among other things. I just feel like I need to hand the reins over to someone else for a while and really put all my effort and energy into getting better. Has anyone had experienced with this or something similar as I'm too scared to voluntarily  section myself but I'm not sure what else to do. Thanks.,5.130918367346942,6.5052000510204095,6.365918367346943,74.3576530612245,68.89795918367346,8.865306122448981,26.244897959183675,9.23628265651192,2.2644734693877537,407,12,71,8,7,137,71,98,0.136,0.735,0.129,-0.1997,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,3,3,7,0,2,7,0,4,1,1,0,2,16,13,7,0,1,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,1,2,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,3,5,5,16,12,2,12,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,1,3,49,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607934879034325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649334790501916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013694227987435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31157358467846624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824210458490127,0.0,0.0,0.09429393490070202,0.13322706271468393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743228171374624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4303642216390973,0.0,0.0,0.20143903885943415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10248892637324007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110861573230487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827848720549826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18747194587237773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35840695959366675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18670701864582476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801067515112865,0.1435675714963418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19877139237500785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949577459288168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757627306999046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169309269512747,0.0,0.0,0.12389433906962635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20284538996224766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OMGilluno,2020/03/10,"I think someone I grew up with has schizophrenia Basically I see my friend arguing online that the world is flat, that 5G not corona virus is causing all the deaths these past few months, that NASA has never gone into space...  on and on...  Ive asked my friend to see a doctor and he wont go...   is there anything i can do?",2.796818181818182,3.9626323181818215,3.861030303030304,90.89154545454548,74.30303030303031,6.492121212121212,22.29090909090909,6.742157984588678,0.3724945454545456,247,6,55,2,5,80,51,66,0.047,0.8540000000000001,0.099,0.5267,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,3,0,9,1,0,1,2,9,15,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,1,2,7,2,6,13,2,12,0,0,2,0,5,6,0,0,3,35,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23582756126181345,0.0,0.26790979683253724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29439240700618124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933225935912079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44281568409739536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16286769737611784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287421622944739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210250134930234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735691388462353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4567278043593578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24281484390437505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836262757347267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mistake_Fake,2020/03/10,"I really need help. My friend is spiraling out of control, I can't get her to see that this is fake. I've been friends with this girl for 5 + years. She used to pretend she was dating Justin B. Even I got along  with it and wrote a story for her. Now we are out of highschool, and she is own her own. She thinks she is dating shawn mendes (the american singer) but she is already engaged to *someone else.* If you want pictures of our convo...pls reply to this. I really really need help!",0.3520666666666692,2.6393651400000024,2.056000000000001,95.16466666666668,87.6,5.333333333333334,18.333333333333336,6.816661863887847,0.06873333333333331,374,10,83,5,12,122,68,100,0.032,0.815,0.153,0.9032,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,2,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,2,0,9,0,0,2,0,17,18,4,0,4,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,1,17,3,14,14,2,6,0,0,1,0,18,2,0,1,4,55,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26103302453323995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653050619613384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976027940794299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562355829626068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3655077893438909,0.0,0.12358487398756066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891864532131021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171019327323748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35078988433606595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.454609890670341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884955480332092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004236073893212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515683308418896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20429872436437949,0.0,0.0,0.13952022801261002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15232706990754286
mentalhealth,whoamitryintobe,2020/03/10,"Should I be taking anti-depressants if I don't feel depressed? Due to a few circumstances in my life and concerns about my mental well-being, I decided to get a psyche evaluation. My psychiatrist is a very well established and learned man, and I did a good job of being very specific about my mental state. On my end, my biggest concerns include lack of focus, dysfunction, laziness, lack of motivation and lack of attachment. However, he informed me that I'm prone to experiencing mood extremities, which I don't, save for the occasional emotional outbursts which I mostly experience in and around my period. 

I really don't think I am depressed, I do experience happiness and fulfillment for the most part. The only thing I believe to be out of place is that I've been experiencing random bursts of anxiety and dread that pass over shortly. Despite my insisting I am not depressed, he prescribed Cipralex which I am to take. I am a few weeks behind because I really don't want to mess up my brain structure/hormones if there isn't a need. Honestly, the biggest thing I want to change is my lack of productivity and attachment. Should I be taking Cipralex as prescribed?",8.197461059190026,8.394955023364492,8.734158878504676,64.2061292834891,61.85046728971962,12.366978193146418,39.79595015576324,11.855464076750405,5.133882866043615,941,47,154,28,12,315,114,214,0.11699999999999999,0.752,0.131,0.62,2,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,1,5,11,0,1,10,0,21,2,1,1,0,32,31,11,0,11,3,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,8,10,0,0,6,0,0,1,6,5,1,0,2,3,27,5,27,23,9,17,0,3,0,0,4,11,0,5,4,115,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677435242530503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425117807351872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508351252100904,0.0,0.0,0.15725302181055004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15581165513774695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765164866982927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4808623389827405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700288206446691,0.12362185922860384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730619052692297,0.0,0.0,0.07057322086791927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292208077105447,0.0,0.0,0.11706873381793828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857998731903524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385064684158596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858582046012557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813171729372029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034929577295933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615293726719437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15114592457059867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582597603298214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788304026597929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148286746393717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18545461199923952,0.08943390649165273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303276817855444,0.16464968580791778,0.0,0.111958498601062,0.0,0.25098904420440643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EmKo92,2020/03/10,"How do people that lack empathy survive? My soon to be ex-husband completely lacks empathy. This isn’t coming from a place of hatred, it’s just the facts. In the entire time I’ve known that man, he hasn’t shown me affection unless I’ve complained about the lack of it and literally told him step-by-step what I need and how to do it. He’s really bad at affection. He’s not compassionate. He sucks at all those things. He lacks the entire set of skills with everyone in his life. Ex-girlfriends, family, our pets, even our son... 

He’s great when things are carefree and easy (i.e., the beginning of a relationship) but as soon as things are heavy or serious in any way, he can’t handle it. He takes it personally. He literally does not understand that someone talking about their feelings isn’t a personal jab at him. Doesn’t matter who’s doing it, so it’s not just me. It’s something he truly doesn’t understand. I don’t even really think he understands what he’s feeling half of the time but I don’t wanna jump to conclusions. 

Career wise he’s super successful. Everyone he works with enjoys being around him and he excels at almost everything he does. But those relationships thrive because they’re mostly superficial. I’ve tried telling him this once (in a supportive and “it’s ok” way) but he doesn’t understand. 

He refuses to get any help because he’s in the military so he’s afraid of the consequences that would come with doing so. I can’t tell if that’s the only reason or if he’s also in denial. Regardless, it soon won’t affect me all too much anymore (aside for our poor son, but that’s a different conversation) I just am so curious and truly baffled as to how a person like that gets by. 

Obviously everyone’s priorities lie in different places and maybe he’ll feel fine about his life when he’s old and looks back at it as long as he has everything he wants and is successful but isn’t having someone to love and having someone love you back a basic human need? How can someone that lacks empathy ever truly have a REAL, healthy relationship? A lifetime of short relationships/hook-ups isn’t the same thing. 

I’m truly baffled. 

Does anyone struggle with this themselves or know anyone that does? I know I’ll never get from him what I personally need, hence the divorce so I’m not asking for advice. I don’t really know what I’m asking for, my mind just can’t make sense of a person like that because I’m a very empathic person myself.",3.551886954761663,5.531208914937763,5.030147758324059,79.93783068515334,73.95850622406637,8.602853962149581,25.863981378403,9.245585301136952,2.3038560267179435,1955,68,369,47,41,655,212,482,0.040999999999999995,0.762,0.19699999999999998,0.9978,2,0,1,0,1,0,58.0,3,1,1,8,29,21,1,2,22,1,31,4,0,9,6,84,67,39,0,14,20,2,3,2,0,3,2,0,1,8,35,17,0,1,14,0,1,3,20,6,0,1,1,4,26,15,47,61,10,36,0,0,1,2,65,16,1,7,16,223,61,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254398787371948,0.0,0.0,0.07433809379344904,0.0,0.0,0.05936767088497204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096803862782308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362361329039334,0.10381711792902583,0.0,0.0,0.06608707970660918,0.1388040097667234,0.0,0.0,0.11416805048595187,0.0619851791850826,0.13576340186570676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789799874630167,0.07783656562118796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551246925913811,0.0,0.0,0.25986281022671026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806628591939863,0.06715203381283083,0.0,0.21281122660407734,0.1334396865002157,0.0,0.06998447143634129,0.0,0.11261007287731305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635802828614562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184706303301321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049759805370921305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12239690156277708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487222858900773,0.07253734730779297,0.0,0.0,0.06569781702827861,0.062340770209443126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400441427921045,0.0,0.04955408180146928,0.0,0.07458150794901817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495867307123771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545730758395966,0.1651384104181639,0.05725650665688881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789972742404318,0.07906047330884483,0.0,0.05646093449606428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146690821462657,0.3889277257838838,0.1551246925913811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449848347228438,0.1426752557736299,0.07632847432548799,0.0,0.2391097521414928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516046397950538,0.057151624531125385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760911310700956,0.0,0.0,0.08424379119417309,0.0,0.0,0.05581733184186908,0.059669259232019066,0.12977362644102136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972802820090788,0.04756836754730905,0.0,0.0,0.08657692123266165,0.0,0.0,0.07093707553469245,0.0,0.05040236306677871,0.0,0.0,0.3091352608552939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061253680249990075,0.04378717803068904,0.1178524824317504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0540457559034652,0.0,0.0,0.05273616244597239,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PurpleCatLord,2020/03/10,"I treat friendships like power play So let's say I ask a friend if they wanna hang out and they said sure and we hang out, that's great. If they say they can't however they have more power in the friendship and I have less. 
I do that with every little thing without even realizing. I won't initiate a conversation twice in a row because then I'm exposed and weak and I'll lose. 
It's so complicated yet once I noticed it I realized there are very clear rules to how it works, which makes me feel crazy.
I feel crazy. 
And it ruins my friendships because I play games all the time which just makes me feel like all of my friendships are fake.",1.4773500545256226,3.793566511450383,2.561575790621593,93.3634541984733,82.3587786259542,5.574918211559434,20.80752453653217,6.868970318607317,0.3150868047982551,507,15,110,6,14,161,80,131,0.122,0.633,0.245,0.9516,3,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,5,4,7,12,0,0,5,0,8,1,0,3,4,27,16,12,0,3,4,0,3,2,1,1,1,3,0,0,9,10,0,0,5,3,0,2,3,4,0,1,1,6,19,8,9,13,4,10,0,2,0,0,13,5,0,2,5,71,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19145371948041925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24967970594113495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13526378111448656,0.0,0.1725468535899027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106483355856384,0.14630409096429206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15822248900010444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257848987583841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20941461866377548,0.0,0.20010293602698664,0.2052562900306011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291108746828078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734017062553972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23315807764927995,0.0,0.21809775818867635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19480494804435897,0.32571907281679835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19301488763976926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605530500978036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941638875572402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16897559278631674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974130506311923,0.0,0.14909167259993478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Straight-Print,2020/03/10,"I need some help figuring out if i actually had an anxiety attack I(18F) have my semester finals in less than a week and have a history of getting really anxious before exams. I have tendency of worrying and overthinking about everything and tend to measure my worth based on my academic success. It was recently pointed out to me by my bestfriend that I should also appreciate myself for my non academic achievements like relationships and health. I had never considered anything besides my academics to be worthy of my self validation even though I encourage and support other people in their non academic endeavors. I realise I'm too hard on myself but it's something i can't really help at this stage because my mind is already wired that way but I am really trying. 
Today when i sat down to study i got extremely overwhelmed and started freaking out. My throat started closing up and I felt like I was losing control. This has happened to me earlier when i couldn't breathe or swallow, to calm down i called my friend and told her i am scared and freaking out and to talk to me and calm me down.
I'm considering going to a therapist when i go home for summer break but i really needed an opinion on whether i may or may not have had an anxiety attack. It'll just help me feel more in control of the situation. Thank you for reading through I know it's really long.",5.791606837606839,7.117597784615384,6.8810256410256425,71.45619658119661,67.30769230769229,10.393162393162395,35.5982905982906,10.504223727775694,4.189726495726496,1104,55,185,30,18,371,152,260,0.106,0.745,0.149,0.8733,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,5,9,16,2,2,7,0,20,4,2,2,1,41,39,23,0,5,9,0,3,2,1,4,1,0,1,1,9,16,1,2,4,1,1,2,4,7,0,0,9,3,40,9,35,24,3,34,0,2,0,0,13,17,0,7,14,141,49,8,0.0,0.0,0.11570820839693473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13084606557865272,0.09482119935784082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18141300673519947,0.13395149917263954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757384398420957,0.0,0.0,0.2697832983302444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227979135170179,0.0,0.10089520219410192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107426526563418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26597495545105865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831503837722684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656398446555544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05995306879333661,0.0,0.11384677062019773,0.12988875328300653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160767351088377,0.0,0.0619484624798757,0.0,0.13477328272247244,0.0,0.09483207386489924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048519586373491,0.0,0.1062163414003974,0.0,0.0,0.1260354463093115,0.0,0.0,0.23842695972823716,0.0,0.1189363976172064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516352997550351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585561918519276,0.0,0.0,0.1049316187236556,0.0,0.1326506385936187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972292624816848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758378132124812,0.09144927788670736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220221361903103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208793648817937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860310387789375,0.0,0.3797981479784045,0.0,0.11707457465177093,0.12730089816134602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187102727748036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123695429980401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332787909003737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128176164751793,0.0,0.0,0.16785035205413382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455298482166092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530289197527156,0.0,0.1091642618216271,0.0,0.13767008945428108,0.0,0.0,0.11649542206351167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239145985409747,0.11329968787507125,0.0,0.08050193725337937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411615417025047,0.09511051764507696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041462321250596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rep989wri,2020/03/10,I need advice. I am 16 years old. Idk if this affects it any but I have been diagnosed with PDD and ADHD. I hold onto my childhood blanket on a daily basis as well as suck my thumb. Is this normal and should I seek help?,-0.5773758865248197,1.5645393829787255,2.026702127659576,94.4841666666667,91.34042553191489,3.984397163120569,16.343971631205672,5.46131890053228,-0.6239900709219861,169,4,37,1,6,58,39,47,0.105,0.767,0.128,0.2846,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,0,10,7,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,7,1,5,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,3,26,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4203265851888745,0.3417676288563177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378391935950165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35498470893954226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344272929077905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593321404752985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34267670705272746,0.0,0.0,0.3669994703987543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31446355142078425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252248816480027
mentalhealth,pchkitty,2020/03/10,"Advice? Please... So I need some advice on how to handle my partner's recent doctor appointment.
For context; he has been taking antidepressants for almost a year and been seeing a mental health nurse on a regular basis. 
But today, during a routine appointment with the nurse, she told my partner that they ""dont have any mental health problems"" and was then refused a refill for the medication. 
So I have decided to go with him to the next appointment due to him struggling with communication. 
I don't really know what to do? Because it's pretty obvious that he has, at the very least, depression and anxiety. Plus I'm a huge advocate for male mental health awareness (because of the high amount of male suicide)
I myself have a diagnosis of borderline personality disorder, so I'm not oblivious to mental health issues. But I'm certainly not a trained professional so I dont want to just disagree with a doctor. But when you live with someone and spend every day with someone, it becomes obvious when they struggle??
I'm not sure how much this makes sense, but some clarity would be ideal, as my partner is now left feeling invalidated and without medication. 
Any advice would be appreciated.",6.681527777777778,8.249973356481483,7.562111111111111,66.49400000000003,65.43518518518519,10.389629629629633,34.77037037037037,10.504223727775694,4.158605925925927,959,44,149,25,15,321,123,216,0.08,0.823,0.09699999999999999,0.8604,0,0,0,0,0,1,29.0,0,1,2,1,10,7,0,2,14,0,17,8,0,3,4,41,30,20,1,6,9,0,1,0,3,2,8,0,0,6,6,12,0,1,3,0,1,1,7,4,0,0,4,2,15,3,26,22,5,17,0,1,1,0,16,6,0,3,10,105,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29961023187953834,0.0,0.0,0.10233999247329667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390009857116559,0.0,0.07818383200831681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12460211461874547,0.11287347556831195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591148243919143,0.0,0.0880259619379412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117131719757769,0.20921503612158507,0.0,0.0,0.23955868413444914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610913228639322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05167612557971903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808344112262963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4345414626515195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798144662123876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667176443513783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056167245914293694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104217800738303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024575564842227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682202636601694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059144240480069,0.4119801074019775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512982759804286,0.07578108260440934,0.0,0.0,0.10869240499513168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923836689520337,0.0,0.1121865051620779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397562005388623,0.0,0.09779298816468948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654728679778877,0.0,0.1009116054217648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144132618364336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17318991938653566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136862985295035,0.0,0.11179180190234096,0.0,0.0963236601956144,0.0,0.07684277372578767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687502759081128,0.09765786833960836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432690234381728,0.060281065082711575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985185538779164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14520196018980974,0.0,0.0,0.06581438509493708
mentalhealth,xxxstonerman42069xxx,2020/03/10,"Voices in my head?!?!?!  I was diagnosed with mild anxiety about 3 years ago, I've had it my entire life though. And for the past few years I have gone though moments where I hear voices in my head (usually only lasts a minute at most), they aren't saying anything in particular, most of the time it sounds lady yelling at me but the words are complete gibberish. I go in and out of phases where I'll get this like 3 or 4 times a week, and other times I won't get it for a couple of months. I'm just wondering if any of you guys have gotten anything similar, and mainly just want to know if this is also a symptom of anxiety or a sign of something more serious.

I'm 19 years old and I know that's around the age where psychotic breaks happen so it just worries me a lot if it may get worse.",3.59690909090909,4.106883478787879,4.992121212121212,85.98818181818184,71.78787878787878,8.424242424242426,25.90909090909091,8.575989854853784,1.5451818181818182,614,18,135,10,11,206,102,165,0.096,0.871,0.034,-0.8654,0,0,1,0,1,0,18.0,0,1,1,0,12,2,0,0,10,0,9,5,2,0,0,27,23,15,0,4,9,0,0,1,0,2,3,6,0,1,9,8,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,4,6,13,1,19,17,6,29,0,0,0,0,5,11,0,10,16,87,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058615877271554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780802269645185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017948160144008,0.0,0.2253916609326741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24245594243733398,0.13114188362052168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544573292605952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16300161968248555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952196726059944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308985519039213,0.0,0.0837227015549843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586534565478154,0.1302704670112868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30237607483972445,0.0,0.16603509264976946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16192131443864172,0.12008166251000567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040531799687692,0.07197083303583024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12524223245033986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758569744248265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545826662831429,0.0,0.0,0.11203995294784176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062915934388318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171510697030538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134105444855214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531170423753024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28947314354669296,0.0,0.25770227506469745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622470324200309,0.0,0.08689040325074936,0.0,0.11816747834118152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15975720017405814,0.0,0.14960587674986592,0.15012691507814813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845987435400812
mentalhealth,TheHeartbreakPrinxe,2020/03/10,"Fight or flight? So, all of my life the same thing has happened and I literally cannot figure out how to manage this...there comes a time about once a year where I just completely lose my shit, I cut ties with people, I just up and quit jobs, I don’t go to classes that I’m supposed to, don’t show up for people and I will either fight (verbally) or flight, like just straight run away. This has caused a lot of issues and has made me seem very flaky and I mean, this all boils down to the temporary insanity that happens. I am on medication and yes, I see a therapist but nothing helps, this always happens and when the smoke clears...I just, I have to pick up the broken pieces of my life. It’s heartbreaking to everyone around. Does anyone have any advice or does this happen to anyone else?",4.133687821612348,5.0430179433962286,4.741612349914239,86.81269296740997,70.82389937106919,8.045969125214409,24.51743853630646,8.296473431620573,1.2275232704402517,619,16,132,9,11,198,101,159,0.15,0.8170000000000001,0.033,-0.9529,1,0,1,0,2,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,10,7,4,0,8,1,10,5,1,4,2,31,21,14,0,0,9,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,8,11,1,0,3,1,0,3,3,6,0,0,1,1,14,1,21,19,6,16,0,2,1,0,3,10,1,5,4,86,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122790211006164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025616033506226,0.0,0.0,0.09828177836319993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20211011550332408,0.14808267406626402,0.0,0.12865765857526054,0.0,0.0,0.13578574958643372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846671794139185,0.0,0.12449526539992628,0.15153143895629215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529491457557341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073187427606913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809958141571813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08213673964626524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.511210996958874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687188598141623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508462786238582,0.14341850274746554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20416419426809496,0.07060748716172889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16168621474496653,0.0,0.12286976469261073,0.0,0.13675280233505213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15742980945580382,0.0,0.14559346958915234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386753847531483,0.0,0.0,0.15391413006785673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20039051307450914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537198496385792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11516750515985325,0.13156989425366314,0.0,0.0,0.14835256752413564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16780436101522436,0.09601581458522533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842735374440751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192480453829657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093069193371461
mentalhealth,unknown_2468,2020/03/10,"My mental health has been really bad lately. I'm a first year university student and I struggled with depression and anxiety and it has been really bad lately. It has reached the point were I get anxiety attacks almost every day and I just feel so hopeless and empty and I don't see the point in trying anymore I have so much work to do and  I don't even know were to start everything is just so overwhelming and I'm really stressed out. I'm at the lowest point in my life right now and it has reached the point where I have thoughts about ending my life but they are passive thoughts not active thoughts, I would never do that but it's still really scary and I used to self harm and I'm two years clean but recently I've been feeling the urge to hurt myself again but I'm trying really hard not to . I've tried going to the counselor at me school a few times but every time I've tried my anxiety gets really bad and I always end up not going. I just don't know what to do, I feel trapped and I feel like it's never going to get better.",1.9377777777777752,3.890175740740745,3.5358888888888917,88.94800000000002,78.62962962962962,6.912592592592592,21.44814814814815,7.908726449838941,0.9318248148148148,824,23,174,14,20,273,104,216,0.225,0.701,0.07400000000000001,-0.9861,1,1,0,0,0,3,8.0,0,0,1,3,12,13,1,3,8,0,20,3,0,1,2,40,43,21,0,1,11,0,5,1,0,1,3,0,1,1,7,15,0,0,9,0,0,3,8,11,0,2,8,6,20,2,16,34,2,32,0,4,1,0,2,12,0,1,18,109,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096904787157594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08052339228724997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220946303638212,0.0,0.09597341297857297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009394713806628,0.0,0.0,0.2424057554883827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558838998922792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062410969774869964,0.0,0.08335096475763773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714253813868646,0.0,0.0,0.06391805384975131,0.0,0.16307187317246127,0.0,0.08697387677580587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195726570987912,0.06913508322512069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823155795439299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168064433392692,0.0,0.1649960107483215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669014240473615,0.0,0.0,0.10286581748670373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035981463863451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636848565282173,0.0,0.21832968470894168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367081192369222,0.047278695505490576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752503311784078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113973507937027,0.0,0.1492755411886045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659293493977166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719738989222585,0.0,0.09555226074184818,0.0,0.0,0.08264413047802066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794005543170818,0.07711603439600995,0.0,0.10095597625033537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849685618244951,0.0,0.07728352649360344,0.0,0.1108538383282024,0.10116878444611332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23048229954996236,0.11285893539484587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628117034476009,0.0,0.09453375098224123,0.0,0.0,0.0835813239067523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045233749399832,0.0,0.0,0.06874519289578021,0.0,0.0,0.1246380584051133
mentalhealth,Female_on_earth,2020/03/10,"Lighting bolt anxiety I generally experience anxiety to some degree on the regular, but the last few days (including today) have been fill with spikes of anxiety that aren't dissimilar to liternal lightning bolts of fear. 

Like everything around me will be just fine, and all of a sudden, it a Red Alert in my head without warning. I struggle to calm myself and distract myself but it occurs repeatedly throughout the day. 

Anyways, just venting. I should probably go for a walk or something.",6.345996677740864,8.797221406976746,6.90142857142857,67.46500000000002,67.48837209302326,10.030564784053157,37.867109634551504,10.290406445055957,4.766729568106314,395,22,58,11,7,129,69,86,0.12300000000000001,0.708,0.16899999999999998,0.6539,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,3,6,0,6,1,1,0,1,14,7,5,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,1,2,7,3,12,3,3,12,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,2,7,45,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5453598462286098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115414480123743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30650391523329656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135668925748425,0.232448141471512,0.0,0.2674002796469835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13505083981939825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438773599629913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937005025839417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160942165442094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25620577652726034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829395013858468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.248422902608164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22524584598981706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22906723812927696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,roorchan2005,2020/03/10,"A voice in my head Ever since i remember, i've had this voice talking to me inside of my head. it sounds totally like a different person from myself. It talks about thing not even closely relating to the subject at hand at that moment and even has different opinions than myself. It also talks to me directly which i think is weird. I dont know how to word this correctly. English is not my first language. Is there something wrong with me?",4.035546218487397,5.973747647058822,4.8327731092437,82.04176470588239,72.52941176470588,8.151260504201678,28.61344537815126,8.841846274778883,2.422932773109244,350,14,64,7,7,113,61,85,0.057,0.873,0.071,0.2944,2,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,3,0,6,3,3,1,3,14,8,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,8,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,4,11,1,12,7,1,7,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,4,51,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804164704204596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129547538008401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23161650241496365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610605589703396,0.1787642645871325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16810079401212402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4056431115638976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861022296856987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655020712195757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17255962559796026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238720252638759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634784827480893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214234847663602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4765335004507079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312941043200267,0.12663092626362632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216073289123688,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,temporarymental,2020/03/10,"Brain fog most of the day but exercise = magic I don't know if I am depressed anymore, 31 now and generally felt shitty since 18 but can function in life. Still suffer with brain fog and excessive tiredness most days and something small like an offhand comment can set me off to a ridiculous sadness accompanied with depersonalisation.

However I have noticed following exercise or sometimes successfully completing something my synapses are firing like crazy. I feel like that movie limitless and suddenly I feel smart af. Usually with this energy and motivation I come up with really good ideas for the future, I feel like if I felt like this all the time I could be a successful guy.

Does anyone have any idea how to prolong this feeling or have any idea what is the cause of my brain fog or tiredness? Note that even though I feel like shit most of the time I can still go for a 12 mile run, reset my brain and feel on top of the world!",9.696567796610172,7.909418677966106,9.172083333333337,68.71032838983054,59.96045197740114,12.691807909604519,39.63912429378532,11.45678717892309,4.4233395480225965,754,31,137,17,8,242,110,177,0.14800000000000002,0.635,0.217,0.9206,1,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,4,6,15,2,0,10,0,12,8,5,3,1,39,24,15,0,3,7,0,9,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,6,11,0,0,13,2,0,4,1,5,0,0,2,9,15,10,16,20,4,23,0,3,0,0,2,8,1,8,16,82,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14871450230105254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843925619318594,0.0764554369529483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4882535174809636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232577612368497,0.0,0.09418964400688874,0.1146444585285667,0.0,0.0,0.08730179534261402,0.0,0.0,0.14103487477710705,0.0,0.094177297032467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568713281602964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222027436213513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33172380427760584,0.2343448076643851,0.2099735933175416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062142365352737414,0.0917120433370642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826714181015493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3703061160615961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06009226466272882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723246629215398,0.3205179277438522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244881682209281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004817214571463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223941310313104,0.09044997775948203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835575917587148,0.10814340338609177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746435365557706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10742932031565024,0.0,0.12751801388686934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042629034636965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FixMex,2020/03/10,"Turning 2Y sober/clean this june.. Struggling with filling the emotional gap in me. PLS ADVICE Pretext: I am (22M) with a serious history of drug and alcohol abuse. I started using when I was 14 or so. I almost dropped out of school but somehow managed to pass high school. My life during my 'use' is a story for another time, but know that I stopped using it in june of 2018.(after numerous attempts to quit, finally I did) 

So, the problem I am currently facing is with anxiety, and not knowing how i feel. I am extremely lonely, which I know is very dangerous for me(given the history). People around me are extremely mean to me, that has lead me to wonder that my life was fun before 2018. I see people partying, having sex, dating. And here I am, single, having no friends(at the least not good ones) I have gained considerable amount of weight, and somehow my friends don't leave one chance to make fun of me for my looks. Makes me think I am absolutely useless.

I have absolutely nobody to speak to, I don't want to speak to therapists, in school or outside anymore. They don't seem to care enough. I don't have anyone to lean my head on their shoulder. I don't have anyone who can pat me for my struggles. I don't have anyone who can say that they're proud of me for choosing to live my life the right way. These aren't random feelings but I feel this way for most of the time. I don't know what to do, or not to do. I don't know how I feel.

All of these feelings make me feel hollow from inside. I don't feel happy anymore. I see no light for me to keep going on.. I know RELAPSING IS NOT AN OPTION, NEVER, NOW OR EVER. But I am absolutely clueless to what I should tell myself, Every day looks like a big pain in the ass, where everyone around me has absolutely no feelings for me.  Sometimes I think that dating can solve loneliness and anxiety but I don't know any girl that I can date, perhaps I am not meeting enough new people, or interesting enough girls. 

Any advice on my situation would be a big help. Thank you.",2.6566018748276825,4.6378615136476435,4.089480976013235,85.6815718913703,76.54342431761785,7.157678522194653,25.33836503997795,8.07648339933343,1.5553959746346848,1582,57,317,27,36,523,193,403,0.16399999999999998,0.7340000000000001,0.102,-0.9773,1,3,2,0,1,0,60.0,0,1,2,5,13,18,1,2,12,0,44,12,4,9,3,72,81,20,0,4,15,0,9,1,1,2,6,3,0,2,16,11,2,2,22,0,0,4,20,8,0,2,3,17,57,10,46,75,8,39,0,2,4,2,14,15,1,13,18,219,73,5,0.0,0.0975979640656594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16098694230950697,0.0,0.08803117055994343,0.0824841779980237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203227370113993,0.08637476721734336,0.12602950147029351,0.0,0.16338280721525913,0.1727903393304567,0.0,0.0,0.14665800984985458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009294571600247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398427184644063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05312345954145396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09552596922817652,0.0,0.0,0.09265799560726078,0.0,0.2553384916789254,0.0,0.0,0.07451065836228048,0.06940239903397982,0.0787104708565779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3332001605669817,0.0,0.0,0.09023506702994873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06364080300086869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046814200201810714,0.0690901598825178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768707702245307,0.0,0.0,0.08453796784428913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05521256241471966,0.08703108773351112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321647870407323,0.0,0.0,0.31688847129860365,0.0,0.0,0.08722060281056361,0.0,0.0,0.1745464363268508,0.04024305145263035,0.0,0.0727364424461231,0.0,0.1383443379857756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16495288600746524,0.0,0.0,0.08972782033151988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635307639143154,0.07955589108996115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163549990222943,0.0,0.08765016674708749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17132019674779356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881937498519563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761331222744609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07034568021655005,0.0,0.06550593243020525,0.0,0.2500961573413533,0.13128046393162593,0.07498884660686815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09259016140036484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08146852646957797,0.0,0.05830369214340138,0.0,0.0,0.06886711336721267,0.0,0.1722272814144034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199721136617003,0.07583754739170429,0.0,0.09564084215096827,0.0,0.10556196683626612,0.0,0.0,0.0960641552273036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959764561854887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134302236448832,0.0,0.06796595402099821,0.048585445259732886,0.13076694117849588,0.0,0.10030753552486182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932948189347888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851507333793929,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EscapingFWonderland,2020/03/10,"How do you know when you have good mental health professionals? My psychiatrist won’t give me medication for my ADHD, because I’m an active drug user and said I have to wait for hella months of sobriety. However, my ADHD makes me more likely to use due to impulsivity and seeking high stimulation. I can’t focus on much, so it makes me too bored to get hobbies. Also, I would give my medication to family to regulate. Her meds in the past have been ok. The hospital prescribed me lithium, which was the most help. 

My psychologist annoys me. He has an aggressive energy. However, I seem to dislike all authority figures, which is immature, but it is what it is. I also feel that I might be too critical of his methods, but I don’t know exactly what therapists are supposed to bring to the table.",5.0222456351595435,6.497781086092715,7.0338350391330575,69.08327513546058,69.26490066225165,10.788922335942203,31.60806742925948,10.832165505486646,3.920133774834437,628,27,110,20,11,221,100,151,0.064,0.868,0.068,-0.1036,2,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,0,0,7,6,2,0,6,1,17,4,0,5,2,20,31,9,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,8,2,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,2,21,3,15,24,4,8,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,3,5,82,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.402657145885738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679341444127213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211969572892153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19427202978294786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15792458417986552,0.0,0.08470402347179005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752319315003769,0.32140422891660464,0.0,0.14050928461499518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17806777229805446,0.0,0.0,0.11228628881225156,0.1769959122615203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18413113068744907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184265863544951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22364411996825687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860788842505232,0.3375210508155387,0.1688225089236529,0.17771408925398074,0.0,0.0,0.13371425187485805,0.0,0.1231477516726548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15991845303001773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935153356411294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525054972915294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19450564788761787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14468499368822174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900263522169464,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plateauatheist,2020/03/10,"Doing a PhD while having Depression I posted on r/depression and didn't get any response. I just found this community and it pleases me to be reminded that I'm not alone. I consider myself a brilliant person and have had success in my academic life in spite of a rocky upbringing in Nigeria. During my undergraduate years, I had my first experience with depression and anxiety and it affected my grades. Right now I live in Europe and am doing a PhD. I love academic research and I try my best to work as hard as I can. 

The problem is that there are days, sometimes consecutive, where I cannot get out of bed and go to the university. I just lay there all day, curtains closed and only getting up to pee and eat/drink. I see my colleagues show up everyday and it further makes me feel sad. Due to a fear of discrimination I have refused to tell my advisor about this. I worry that knowledge of my situation may prevent me from receiving further funding when my current funding runs out. 

Last week for instance, I stayed home the whole week. Sure I had diarrhea but I was also depressed. I couldn't get up, cook and the usual symptoms. I don't want to fail in achieving my dreams. I know I'm capable of doing good work in my PhD and I don't want to fail at this. Everytime I show my advisor my progress, he tells me he's pleased but I just think he's being polite. Today he hinted about having more ""Sitzfleisch"" meaning that a good PhD student is one who is able to show up, sit down and work as if to mention my absence.

How do I cope with this? Thanks",3.750205627705629,5.317645535714284,5.122792207792209,81.19228354978354,72.53896103896105,8.25021645021645,30.365800865800864,8.841846274778883,2.515051515151515,1227,54,239,24,24,410,171,308,0.08800000000000001,0.753,0.159,0.9809,1,1,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,10,12,16,1,1,10,0,26,5,1,3,2,44,44,24,0,5,7,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,3,1,12,19,1,2,6,5,2,3,6,9,0,2,6,3,42,7,39,34,4,41,0,6,1,1,12,20,0,2,15,164,54,16,0.11761632208258382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181503845074187,0.0,0.09405773027583553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799831322516974,0.0,0.08997616446314623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234310736752487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517055951754222,0.0,0.4052110634593777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152192186394611,0.0,0.12035086043748087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505133179951516,0.0,0.13235106162687324,0.05947034642001677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000443834791198,0.0,0.12896022636259874,0.0,0.0,0.245798695413909,0.0,0.06684406630873843,0.1973019813885331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536112238595642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797876089756162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06463885468403338,0.09587300053869928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307588661481058,0.0,0.0,0.10385736722983326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615332272733503,0.0,0.07850980829583347,0.0,0.0,0.1281186551542687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969986377749927,0.08945251293826183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026980357694834,0.0,0.258214804256076,0.0,0.0,0.11264392440076365,0.0,0.0,0.11254293580177313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004436964138609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372498086326518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220567395154162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632554998124375,0.0,0.0,0.12536334999042226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11085199163083843,0.12224839312920265,0.0,0.0,0.20560369929884567,0.10828530712241244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536379005158456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148652081872187,0.0,0.0,0.07985376215592525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12953776206514353,0.0,0.13874630819627046,0.0,0.18868943813493336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13131442328419313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568782498392687,0.11944508430700106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574105521859015
mentalhealth,Select_Buddy,2020/03/10,"Does Work Related Stress have an Effect on Male Mental Health? HIYA! I am a research student at the university of Lincoln in the UK. I am conducting my first piece of research and would love to get a representative sample! Here is a quick 5 minute survey looking into the effect work related stress has on men. If you could spare the time it would be much appreciated. All responses are anonymous. Thank you. 

https://unioflincoln.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_7UvOZUGYiDcavyt",6.09154711673699,9.70674875949367,5.60801687763713,70.49011251758091,74.0632911392405,8.068073136427566,27.76511954992969,8.841846274778883,2.858973558368496,388,15,58,9,9,119,63,79,0.069,0.8009999999999999,0.13,0.7170000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,0,5,2,4,0,2,8,0,10,2,0,2,1,9,14,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,5,2,8,10,3,8,0,0,1,1,5,5,0,1,3,40,6,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926268472804936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21112865602964995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20521602563970245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604863368165448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25644858914629376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025980249915747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21774698629732664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431338005236639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735419927716764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5527260879328247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22212021894736306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14068091549606362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3512809793152088,0.0,0.0,0.342769020058416,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FutbolCallander,2020/03/10,"Getting out of a rut First post here, hi!

I've been struggling for motivation in University recently (Journalism degree). My ""side-hustle"" is geared towards a career in football media and that's how I spend my Saturdays. I get a lot of fulfilment from writing about that and networking in it.

The issue is I have next to no motivation to do Uni work, especially practical work. Once I get back from Uni I'm exhausted and don't feel able to do any meaningful revision or research. I know I need to and that makes me feel worse.

Additionally, I put so much pressure on myself to be great at something the first time I do it and tend to get quite disheartened if I'm not. The fear of failure demoralises me rather than motivating me to do things differently or better.

I'd basically really appreciate any advice people have for getting out of a rut.

Thanks!",4.6002136752136735,6.542059524691362,6.314444444444447,71.98653846153849,71.03703703703705,10.169800569800572,30.980056980056982,10.389873798559362,3.6561618233618236,681,30,122,21,13,234,104,162,0.115,0.733,0.152,0.7603,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,9,6,8,0,3,7,0,11,1,0,5,0,25,25,10,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,7,0,1,1,3,5,0,2,1,2,14,3,25,23,2,17,0,1,0,0,2,8,0,4,7,82,20,7,0.1648324772698614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16107238908870694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22418347377999565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674600051890916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578093117600782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221485594257482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18548236308508068,0.1666885063388619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804128419220681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4305908308194553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817283880997855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720422814476868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09058761876582684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013467770966825,0.0,0.0,0.11002695852279494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12117083666126174,0.1222211933108665,0.0,0.0,0.1753012095601814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755412087423016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11427408539450146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786394931937972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657021666919213,0.0,0.17531962920717176,0.0,0.0,0.10559590571587643,0.0,0.16275218576576214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689609398856902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17231869421022464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15175559912834588,0.0,0.0,0.10950737364552787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961151430437251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240000013195577,0.0,0.16797837637048552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,infinity2134,2020/03/10,Two different people from different places I love my gf but there are some things like her cleanliness and some bad habits that almost cause me anxiety. For example she leaves lights on in rooms she isn’t in and doesn’t clean up dirty dishes when she is done eat. Also the constant dirty tissues are everywhere. I clean up behind her most days but I’ve been getting more upset over it recently and while she says she will work on it the same things keep on happening over and over. She came from a family that allowed that to be ok and I came from a strict family that did not tolerate that type of behavior. This is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to conflicting views on what is acceptable. Please help me navigate this bump in the road. Thanks!,4.111734693877551,6.023293591836738,4.278656462585038,86.20533163265307,72.26530612244899,8.981632653061224,24.494897959183675,9.516144504307137,2.0442204081632656,606,18,121,15,12,188,95,147,0.12300000000000001,0.7090000000000001,0.168,0.7813,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,5,7,0,1,7,1,12,3,0,2,0,22,20,11,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,3,0,13,8,2,2,1,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,5,3,14,5,21,13,5,24,0,0,1,1,12,15,0,4,7,87,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17047199137374378,0.0,0.0,0.1361418427960023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023406796874346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214430841742334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3894212077150923,0.0,0.17488462890099654,0.0,0.14664773756224564,0.0,0.18397028042189112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979150373434217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3557316835533784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17421587540452593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17419926968248955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32097654384684643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894401143948291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15054374935491185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410910179537576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15131821919054236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802608719734272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317126128419804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15364934846541795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802382715885905,0.0,0.17786584177668918,0.18687373799866508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680926675215298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538265179097192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567352435163293,0.0,0.0,0.22620140507170966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16630093573978175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393763633168235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bax6,2020/03/10,Having to feel this way is inhumane. I really want to die. This should be my choice at this point.,-0.19866666666666788,2.1045378000000032,1.7600000000000016,94.31833333333331,96.0,6.666666666666668,11.666666666666668,7.793537801064563,0.04366666666666719,76,1,17,2,3,25,17,20,0.183,0.747,0.07,-0.5529999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5458733583515601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26594601069550905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4972112379914739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33694956524269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31023047102268186,0.4174901510023039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chknnugts,2020/03/10,"I can’t bring myself to go to school I’m in my senior year of high school and I’ve lost all motivation. I wake up and tell myself that I’m going to go to school that day, and I end up right back in my bed doing nothing all day. I try really hard to get out of bed and I don’t want to fail, but it’s so hard to just go. I never feel any better after I’ve skipped school all day but I just keep doing it.",-1.3601052631578907,0.2097345157894744,1.778157894736843,99.23460526315789,88.05263157894737,4.642105263157895,12.657894736842106,5.6839178017228535,-1.3266,309,3,83,2,10,110,52,95,0.11900000000000001,0.848,0.033,-0.7611,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,4,4,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,1,4,17,16,7,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,0,5,3,2,0,0,1,3,11,1,15,15,3,21,0,2,0,0,1,7,0,0,9,48,15,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834020548689988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225040143176392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14090187624784342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082365286051089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110650917111175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805548541315723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08323592868854447,0.0,0.36217135666451705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285431323537162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16832588712695332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416072009568759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17391201273196472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287416455686236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15286780449382406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020617794071688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605482059763346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6449443702297621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392490291628395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816496875428848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396858510885386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025941502310013
mentalhealth,tthrowaway4837,2020/03/10,"what’s wrong with me i don’t want to self diagnose, but i think i might have some form of anxiety. 

i hate talking to people and i get really scared when i go to any social event. when i think about being lonely i get sick to my stomach. sometimes when my friends are sick i feel like everything around me falls apart. i also cry a LOT. like an unhealthy amount of crying. everyday i come home from school i either cry or feel like crying. this has been going on for about half a year maybe. i’ve never talked about this to anyone, whenever someone catches me crying i say “oh i’m just tired”. but sometimes i just feel fine. do i get help?

will probably delete this post later, also apologies if this was hard to read, english is not my native language",1.262666666666668,3.7761363333333335,2.5280000000000022,91.78066666666666,85.66666666666666,5.2,19.666666666666668,6.691623216298621,0.3188666666666671,590,17,118,7,18,189,100,150,0.306,0.581,0.113,-0.9903,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,11,9,1,1,3,0,11,5,1,0,1,22,25,10,0,2,8,0,4,3,1,2,4,1,1,1,5,4,0,0,5,1,0,5,3,4,0,1,2,5,21,5,16,20,5,17,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,5,11,75,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18340720121372125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798126952229623,0.0,0.0877241905143588,0.0,0.0,0.08018171655382113,0.0,0.0,0.10208288572464023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878025211880548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6298120839455932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639022923717293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306029808403724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739456676253849,0.1638441920580846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885957313455043,0.0,0.17973503077169806,0.0,0.1303421109937177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272408507453197,0.11321540708740847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768625962580111,0.0,0.11502592224705042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16806965375524308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974905053226352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520399428951568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12164945904061687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844254356517968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949951084536795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982460903259628,0.0,0.12363640909603267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470358677606204,0.0,0.07346217493410545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119221815984947,0.1148072320978493,0.1160547474867398,0.0,0.0,0.11962848376351612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689422851654095,0.0971616835167068,0.0,0.22682817764302296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18433891158446733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695508562331008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317992326756573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763684385745801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537643702446252,0.0,0.07384536557429774
mentalhealth,Grenkorn,2020/03/10,"Forgetfulness When does forgetfulness become soemthing to worry about?

35m, ADHD and Bipolar type 2.  I have noticed it for about a year now, but I am forgetting to do a lot of simple things.  I forget to zip my fly, lock my doors at night, lock the bathroom doors at single stall public places, leave my wallet/phone at home, turn my car lights off after I park.  I will also find myself in the middle of something and complety forget what I am doing.  I find it hard to believe that i have become that absentminded.",6.040606060606059,6.400570989898991,6.578333333333332,77.28750000000002,66.37373737373737,8.620202020202019,27.61111111111111,8.344100000000001,1.8579414141414141,404,11,74,5,6,132,69,99,0.127,0.873,0.0,-0.8294,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,0,7,1,0,0,0,11,8,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,6,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,13,0,15,7,2,13,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,1,5,53,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251010638390144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16702626868228726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4613416894115195,0.0,0.2353151096352169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827758901202225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817908030717268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870986582888578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20950486641226154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211539098986042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17756636847661791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960021374292938,0.0,0.0,0.23778992103110064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21821555568709286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16079159671027818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875813594072967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271810674054614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21210874093742724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13449979924159736
mentalhealth,rosemarryrain,2020/03/10,"Looking At Media or Posts That Remind Me of My Trauma or Are Similar to My Experiences Make me Physically Sick I never used to have this problem... I used to like reading or watching videos about other people who are going through the same thing I went through, or at least help me cope with it, but in the past few months I physically react to stuff like that. Like for example if I read a Reddit post by a user with similar parents to mine, I get physically sick and nauseous, I have to force myself to click away. Another example, I was watching this YouTube video that was like a compilation of Reddit comments, the title being ""r/askreddit, how do you know you're depressed?"" (I dont need any confirmation regarding that kind of stuff I just like to watch it anyway) and about 1/4 I was shaking and I couldn't bare any more, I shut it off and tried to make myself forget it. Its become so intense that even thinking about how bad I'm screwed ruins me for hours until I forget it. I'm not allowed to get therapy. My parents think it's not real and im just being a pussy. It's so painful",5.582513293158456,5.729321437788018,6.5264516129032275,78.00198511166255,67.34101382488478,9.073236440978377,31.899680964197092,8.841846274778883,2.546092095001773,860,33,166,13,13,287,124,217,0.147,0.77,0.083,-0.9481,3,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,0,11,14,1,1,7,0,12,4,0,8,1,36,27,16,0,4,10,2,0,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,20,7,0,0,3,4,0,3,5,8,0,0,4,5,25,6,29,20,4,16,0,2,5,1,6,6,1,5,10,119,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831313656551648,0.1411908243588392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265068162807316,0.0,0.11242597824829127,0.0,0.1487088283672258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597266408056098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15780718660190465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893414742534415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171219305707774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406966991044908,0.0,0.07652391700878827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025213558819126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326017734917433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14544362166109998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402158234596465,0.07399936336215167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3289125859531793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130709335310803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17975800654188615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074752484736721,0.0,0.0,0.09984024988830427,0.1038493210249473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327563126243792,0.0,0.29902272867323343,0.0,0.1285373491152748,0.09334840327180864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579123263559262,0.0,0.0,0.12884055017602078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26937012721804954,0.1532596144717587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082809242300901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398243832194733,0.0,0.08945456391980221,0.17255480505144768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141757833575567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23258636127443574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482062508363664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway-8382910010,2020/03/10,"I need help I don’t know anymore

Recently I moved into my girlfriends house with her together. I truly love her and have done some pretty bad things. I’m scared about the actions I’ve done, and am so fearful to lose her. I don’t deserve her. I moved in with her and her dog. She typically hits her dog lightly but it’s more out of a reinforcement behavior. I’ve never had a dog before so I started adopting that same behavior. Except in translated into much worse. I’ve been ruminating my angers into her 2 year old husky sweet girl. I’ll slap her about hard, kick her, yell at her. Recently I kicked her hard. The next day later while my girlfriend was playing with her Husky he fell from a small ledge. And stated portraying signs of bruised lungs. We went to the vet and got it checked and analyzed. I’ve never been so scared. I don’t know why I’ve been possessing this behavior. I’ve been stressed with work and gaining weight and beating myself up mentally and getting angry over little things and taking it out on the dog. I feel I have weakened the dogs system and am to blame for the dogs injury. I feel miserable and completely terrible for her. I don’t ever want to do this again and I’m so scared because now she’s breathing every night poorly and we have to monitor her for the next week while she takes pain medicine. I told my girlfriend that I’d rather her take off work to care for her pup. I don’t want to be alone with it while it’s recovering. I want to support it and watch it get better and continue to rebuild my relationship with her husky more than anything. I don’t know why I’ve been doing this, I’ve never had this behavior ever. I’m 20, and have always loved animals. I just want help on how to fix myself.

Tl;dr Moved into my girlfriends house. She uses negative punishment on her dog to reinforce behavior. I started adopting that practice into a day of abusing her dog physically. The next day she had a fall and damaged itself and we went to the vet and I feel extremely guilty. She got treated and is now recovering. The dog isn’t scared of me, but I’m a terrible person for doing this and want help on what to do to better myself and rebuild the trust with her dog. I’m scared for my mental health.",2.5628379674017268,4.7281226487695776,3.871676254394377,86.26068791946308,77.54586129753916,7.0311920741450935,24.73681687440077,8.037061389416179,1.499385043144775,1772,63,352,31,42,580,191,447,0.196,0.685,0.11900000000000001,-0.9928,0,1,0,0,0,0,40.0,3,0,0,7,14,26,2,8,17,0,30,7,2,2,5,67,65,33,0,7,5,0,6,0,4,0,2,1,0,2,19,40,1,0,6,1,2,8,11,16,0,0,16,10,61,10,53,47,5,56,0,3,1,2,44,19,0,1,27,229,80,2,0.0,0.09577378661786634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371852221720473,0.0,0.0,0.06725946083761454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016453142780268,0.0,0.0,0.06651860180023662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749210780026887,0.049274994842942864,0.0,0.06878285721109785,0.0,0.0,0.14298028935739354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241454427949535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847517736783795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563916294945417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165440273680057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623599914327934,0.06810521735245059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909595024900026,0.12261465204993452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446372387466071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929893302821405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482082963615564,0.0,0.0,0.08592160894184853,0.0,0.0,0.1625417975248599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18654066261556887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327096869443114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101581660084102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09043135585171752,0.0,0.0,0.1459097237944414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16292113283744747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577377893585826,0.05942149342765338,0.059936582391887074,0.18702998218404207,0.0,0.2579001670392082,0.07585621514491782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482054694423445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601192091884692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058018368321109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223613471767283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15962550401219214,0.08678430005255723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4046392476646978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442790684894327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09259383125759788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172823425746937,0.0,0.0,0.18232887735370612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740359417585224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723931449367315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981368546928826,0.0,0.0,0.23838673847280345,0.0,0.0648392888084956,0.09843271420148816,0.0,0.14986584444453865,0.14587826642765184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769464996437536,0.0,0.08237564633964252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052053747178646914
mentalhealth,Spookypandaboi,2020/03/10,"What's wrong with me? I have a hard time figuring out what's going on in my head. I dont think I can feel emotions anymore, I can feel but just not emotionally. When somebody does something annoying I can get agitated, but I dont really get angry. When Im going to hang out with a friend or have something really nice to eat or other good things happen I can get excited, but I cant remember ever being happy. At night when my mind goes to dark places I get very uneasy and paranoid, but not really afraid. When something I get into a fight with family or something like that I feel like im gonna cry but I dont really feel like I want to cry. What the hell's wrong with me",1.9849766899766903,3.508802083916084,4.323234265734263,85.2920308857809,77.11188811188809,7.843589743589742,21.706876456876454,8.59863814320734,1.2688652680652677,530,14,114,11,12,185,76,143,0.201,0.583,0.21600000000000005,0.5442,0,0,4,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,14,3,1,4,0,11,2,1,0,1,29,26,13,0,1,11,0,5,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,8,1,0,7,0,0,3,6,6,0,0,0,5,17,8,14,24,0,17,1,0,0,0,2,7,1,3,10,69,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107308737669537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24529359171147105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770926320351604,0.0,0.3925733525500656,0.0,0.0,0.11425002797868253,0.0,0.2511916887697668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099753390252343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052575569973507,0.0,0.2258226893498088,0.15953143554825586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862636876379806,0.0,0.2916733179771375,0.0,0.12691120642131948,0.0936501692299876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873535983913108,0.11885787522274333,0.10002015055566707,0.0,0.11458932803801772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24121119530742685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636456733612318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273882107430633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477981763313368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665477953195652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286113925151042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264823398213023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3438271521160528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417802871781473,0.07154344464737686,0.0,0.0,0.06510640885236382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212633328345517,0.06585648634227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441524808562913,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway4201324,2020/03/10,"How do I know if I’m being gas lighted? I have mental health issues, bpd and ocd and i’m in a relationship with a person that i love, but lately i’ve been questioning the love i have for my person. i feel like i might be being manipulated into loving them it by things i do or how i am being put down, being told that things aren’t so bad, that i overreact to things, and that i take things too hard, i feel like it’s been implied that if they can’t deal with me, no one can. i don’t know if any of this is true and i don’t want to talk to my partner about it because every time i talk about something i’m feeling, it turns into a whole thing because i’m “projecting my anxieties onto them” . the whole thought process is stressing me out and i need some help deciphering if i’m being delusional.",4.382899408284022,4.123896431952666,5.803366863905327,83.55605621301777,69.88757396449704,8.653491124260354,27.550887573964488,8.238735603445708,1.5778989349112424,623,18,138,8,10,212,94,169,0.134,0.693,0.17300000000000001,0.8409,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,0,6,8,0,1,5,0,21,4,0,3,1,31,40,14,0,6,6,0,4,2,1,1,1,0,0,3,15,10,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,2,0,1,4,5,23,6,16,29,3,9,0,0,0,3,16,6,0,8,4,100,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832601274845303,0.0,0.09936139815604816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844825355274493,0.15835294847663295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16358516394665246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390536610410206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094334155566844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970207378045455,0.18557923313039484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635113025791527,0.0,0.0,0.13806130428998492,0.0,0.0,0.08705893990380859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13556582461857886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276240857637013,0.0,0.1465155372922297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691015394809446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516778902956604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308931732828883,0.13778708317888835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630781873868906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801319710646839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268205248094413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305699429213048,0.1455005282502755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394475010967094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999154555310824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878242237389494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765708893330924,0.20879271592251167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43144793492479055,0.0,0.0,0.10311390012442144,0.07573678118781099,0.0,0.0,0.12411034468265195,0.0,0.0,0.14127719678788955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660932900189403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900231360921541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,holmarieox,2020/03/10,"Please help! Advice needed - anxiety *TRIGGER W* I'm writing this post because mentally I'm not innately good place right now and I have to reach out to someone for some advice but I don't have anybody around me that wants to speak to me at the moment.

I really messed up, a few months ago I was in the lowest point of my life and I tried to take my life twice in one week. I couldn't see another way out. I was hospitalised and they were going to section me under section 2. I then realised I hadn't told work about where I was, I had numerous missed calls on my phone and I panicked. I told them a family member had passed and I was dealing with that.

I then tried to take my life again because the minute I said the lie, I knew it was the biggest mistake of my life, I just panicked and didn't know what else to say - I had no holiday to use, my sickness levels were already really high because of my depression and I was basically hanging by a thread. 

Cut to now, I handed my notice in last week as I have found a new job doing something I love and I was feeling really good about it. Then yesterday I got a text from a coworker who I used to be really close to but her negative energy was just really bad for me so I distanced myself from her, she had basically spoken to her auntie who knew the family member I said had died and said he was perfectly well. 

She told me she was going to tell everybody, which she did, I explained to her why I lied but she said 'you couldn't have wanted it bad enough if you failed 3 times'

I am really struggling. I got let go from my job immediately today, all my coworkers know I lied but not only that, my best friend works there too and I've totally failed her and I'm scared of losing her.

Please can someone help me, my mental stability is not here right now, I'm getting intrusive thoughts... I'm ashamed, disgusted in myself and just wish I could go hide in a hole forever.",2.741989795918368,4.313336923469393,4.449234693877552,84.9823724489796,75.1734693877551,8.06326530612245,24.75,8.751876143730069,1.7136846938775512,1502,49,313,31,32,507,195,392,0.217,0.677,0.106,-0.9946,3,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,2,2,7,16,21,2,3,13,0,34,7,1,3,3,52,72,22,1,9,11,0,2,0,1,0,5,6,0,0,11,17,0,0,8,1,0,6,10,14,1,2,33,9,69,7,41,34,8,48,0,5,1,1,37,23,0,2,17,216,80,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16462439039226784,0.0746680912645518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295398079234092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832637724798548,0.06443854872123768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07498585016062431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406632394467029,0.1540442421543466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839806966871758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860120239624895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725375401711987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868412443651702,0.07255036100646038,0.0,0.08742128015739048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036644638438554,0.0,0.0,0.08703592753816758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881606849609842,0.0,0.042591088852479114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235790255286884,0.0650787464361556,0.0,0.04400863079836375,0.0,0.19148780787718708,0.1413024595609346,0.13473876701683346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292014493999734,0.08899752711471401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671778963860373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258527548255616,0.06866170672116904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.086134663625694,0.23798700907643905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423596236839904,0.0,0.0,0.07602420151270645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16977551202772384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723453442966061,0.0,0.0,0.062458220045199575,0.0,0.08135343081191672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590062393007198,0.0,0.0,0.05707893402375434,0.06406352335201297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800628660330193,0.1849266118852537,0.0796280717291602,0.0,0.08067259872611163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237735847480705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14387023638370053,0.32050214601993626,0.06698601786390218,0.08433262678983386,0.0,0.06712335185423836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274187861793916,0.06484721631751329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880593506684963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266665163732952,0.0,0.07362396515558299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687214753730714,0.049117346928792265,0.0,0.07984369689909407,0.2414667257424012,0.0,0.11437830394218128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550174051289855,0.0,0.0,0.099366435477023,0.0668607890371123,0.13513438392254515,0.0,0.07573621092563755,0.0,0.07600781109588108,0.0,0.09686459610474572,0.0,0.0,0.12264627131313907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thr0wwwwway,2020/03/10,"I couldn't stop myself from taking a sh*t in the shower Throw away because this is fucking disgusting and I am so ashamed of it, I don't even know if this is where to even post this, hell I don't think there's any right place to post this.

I had been showering and began to cry, which isn't an uncommon I know. After about 20?30? minutes of crying I was staring at the shower tiles and this thought overcame me that in order to fix things I need to take a shit in the shower otherwise everything is going to get worse. I know its stupid and I began to cry even more as the toilet was right there and if I really needed to go I could easily just... go. But if there was the slightest chance of the thing that I was thinking about getting worse I didn't want to risk it so I just shit right then and there. I won't go into detail because it is so fucking disgusting and I'm ashamed, but the thing is afterwards I stopped crying... I felt relieved that I had prevented things from getting worse but then ashamed that I fucking took a dump in my own shower...

This has happened once before around a year ago and I told myself I would never fucking do that again because its fucking disgusting and I have a toilet right there that I could of just used. But the fear that in some fucking way me taking a shit in the shower correlates to another problem is just something I can't risk, (when I know there is no correlation at ALL, ones a relationship concern and the other is fucking taking a shit in the shower I know they dont have anything to do with each other).

I'm concerned, embarrassed and scared that I might do it again but I don't want to tell anyone in my personal life because its fucking disgusting...",4.240002429543246,5.254077279883383,4.948764577259478,85.03741314382896,70.66180758017492,7.8157920310981535,27.994290573372197,8.07648339933343,1.7236628765792037,1349,47,271,18,24,435,146,343,0.22899999999999998,0.7340000000000001,0.036000000000000004,-0.9968,7,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,1,0,23,29,19,8,20,0,35,13,4,1,2,53,75,26,0,12,12,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,7,1,28,15,0,3,9,0,0,6,11,28,0,1,14,2,36,1,36,55,5,43,1,0,1,8,5,19,13,5,14,204,64,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365536308545168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04883336285395342,0.0752992010177755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05021132488239459,0.0,0.05909363286707894,0.06392625601388427,0.0,0.0,0.06746799753099708,0.0,0.0,0.17509919787674882,0.0,0.06110514655416089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146691192534026,0.0,0.3155203008468703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416095819219935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14228977572874896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453833033245797,0.0,0.0,0.08080638047772744,0.0,0.0,0.06894900304656693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5310985947035329,0.11255351482488107,0.0,0.16324544702331653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350147638041573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973248956615088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05072163093973908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617921855733678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064926291087797,0.05538441279684655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764754635816453,0.04866041448601415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06270185105201406,0.07502632024819217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754854251632667,0.0,0.0,0.06871261309650123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046003419366904136,0.0,0.0,0.0770972243423492,0.0,0.24530189480126624,0.0,0.0,0.07189448514542775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29484833835421737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05528295996139674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007299770552543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21596917649719735,0.0,0.06276523417700103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19082988490626904,0.09202608605166478,0.0,0.05700923593599416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861767340361825,0.07978371623967319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06202091124238225,0.0,0.0,0.08471097120169532,0.05699955269055741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219542026000576,0.05101186853281208,0.0,0.0,0.046243380676708135
mentalhealth,0c_i,2020/03/10,"i havent been able to eat, why? (i dont know if im allowed to cuss, ill leave a warning though) hey so i have anxiety and depression, i think this is the right place to put this because i feel it has something to do with a eating disorder. 

if i do have one, how the hell am i gonna eat???

every time im about to eat i feel extremely nauseous, this has been happening for about a week now. it has slowly gotten worse, i dont know what ill do.

same thing with water but not as bad.

i wonder what the cause of this is, if you can help me please do. even if you dont know, leave a suggestion on what you think this is because it fucking sucks

if you need to know what meds i take, here they are

bupropion
hydroxyzine
buspirone",1.4980119880119886,2.9301214285714288,3.128701298701301,93.73063436563436,78.22077922077922,6.816383616383617,22.235764235764236,7.61054688173877,0.6555470529470533,556,16,132,8,13,184,87,154,0.152,0.7809999999999999,0.067,-0.7791,1,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,4,1,0,8,5,3,0,7,0,21,8,0,3,0,24,37,11,0,6,7,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,13,3,5,0,9,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,3,2,17,0,14,33,1,7,1,1,0,1,8,3,3,6,3,88,30,0,0.12062072472729593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227452426293932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071326681625434,0.14705854846533895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12391071080274607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389045346034063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13824180062699326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4240997731323263,0.0,0.0,0.4937004575718555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966885108123058,0.0,0.10162816291194607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219789253387643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151191635392133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666450852028696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084952920895239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26058216265152834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651599832226004,0.0,0.0,0.2554398624569217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13398243317611944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943873900563655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817357247641078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602298452744545,0.1324053340267504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212571440186519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300943985666787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285972689050227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069177356051678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013504978440023,0.1545777799077086,0.11850924961969815,0.0,0.0703349145946594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675466964628086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884144271281902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080803063112234,0.0,0.0,0.12292282341392174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dandyrose05,2020/03/10,"My job is giving me anxiety, so much so that I came home and cried tonight, but I can’t quit because I’m too inexperienced to get a new job. Background: I am a new nurse. It took me 12 months after graduation to secure a position. At that point I was applying to any and everywhere. I applied for a job 4 hours away from my home and husband but close to my parents. I got the job and finally started my career. I loved that job! The staff, the managers, the residents (it was aged care). It was hard being away from my home and husband, but we treated it like a FIFO job and I came home on my days off. Even when applying for jobs, I never had any issues with my mental health. 

Two months in to my new job, my husbands job threw him a curve ball and reassigned him to a job 5 hours away from our home. This meant it wasn’t practical for me to stay at the job because my days off didn’t correspond with his and his job wouldn’t compromise. So I asked for a transfer to a facility back in my home city and my job, the wonderful people they were, gave it to me. 

I started at this new job nearly a month ago and I hate it - for being the same company, they do nearly everything different and it’s expected I will just know that. The workload, even though it’s the same number of residents, is 2-3x more (it’s completely unnecessary) and we’re expected to complete it during our shift (with no overtime pay if you stay back late to finish it). And if you don’t finish it, you can expect a blunt email the next day telling you it needs to be done, on top of your already busy shift. This probably doesn’t sound like much, but when you have 30 residents to care for, and you’re the only nurse, 2-3x more workload is just not doable most shifts. 

Over the last 3 weeks, I have been developing worse and worse symptoms - I get stomach upset, heart palpitations, sweaty, obsessive thoughts and recently I’ve noticed I’m developing insomnia too. These symptoms all get worse when I have to start getting ready for work. I know I need to go and see my doctor about it, and I’m worried because I feel like because I’m a nurse it might look bad on me. I feel like I should be able to manage this on my own, but I also know it’s stupid to think mental health has to be done alone. My doctor doesn’t work tomorrow, but I think I’ll be trying to see her the following day. 

Tonight was my tipping point, where I knew I’m not ok - I was berated in front of my peers for not doing something immediately after an incident because I attended to their meeting first (the incident happened maybe 10 minutes before the meeting started). I was going to complete this task immediately after their meeting, and informed them of this, but instead I was forced to leave the room by my facility manager and deal with the task and then return for the final few minutes of the meeting (the task was making a phone call relating to the incident). And then later this evening I had a call from one of the managers telling me all the things I did wrong with the paperwork, and before I could explain myself and that this was how I’d been taught in the other facility, she hung up on me. This was on top of the handover telling me the new thing per resident that had been added to our hectic workloads (so another 30 pieces of paperwork). I left work 30 minutes after my scheduled finish time (of which I won’t get paid for), and came home and cried. No matter what I do, I never feel like I’ve accomplished something on my shift. I know I’m always going to have an email the next day telling me what I didn’t do or what wasn’t done the “correct” way. My previous facility, nearly every shift I felt like I was good at my job, that I’d made a difference, and yet here, I feel like I can’t do anything right. 

This anxiety and indeed whole night, was compounded by the fact that because I only have 4 months experience, I can’t quit and then go look for a new job. I don’t have enough experience for anyone to just happily hire me. 

Tomorrow’s plan - ring my old facility and hope they give me references and apply like mad to any and every job I can find and pray to God a better job is out there just waiting for my application. Ring my doctor and book in for her next available appointment and chat to her about everything and if need be, get a doctors certificate for a few days off because I sure as hell feel like I need it right now.  

If you got this far, thanks for reading. Peace xx",5.5263502363558255,5.388583572067041,6.2976955307262585,80.56685270734852,67.46927374301676,9.744950580146108,31.40148259561667,9.466822959209583,2.5889703480876665,3487,127,722,64,52,1151,347,895,0.085,0.809,0.106,0.9636,20,1,2,0,0,0,95.0,4,7,6,11,29,28,4,2,51,1,66,12,2,3,7,113,135,62,0,15,19,4,7,9,0,5,9,3,8,0,45,47,0,2,20,4,2,12,20,8,0,3,42,14,109,20,100,80,15,117,2,0,4,1,51,39,1,9,72,474,154,40,0.036069704130868865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03197361639060284,0.0,0.0,0.037357335425975684,0.03980381543842607,0.02884492936183066,0.030012883320636043,0.0,0.0,0.07358590707554719,0.03782222975665495,0.05518644986598592,0.0,0.0,0.025220775790697456,0.0,0.02968229316173565,0.0,0.0337203043102158,0.0,0.10166602311901338,0.055470752053350496,0.030116696316727438,0.15391429795901507,0.0,0.061385323112258985,0.0,0.0,0.03190072213033835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736624015046057,0.12376239734067784,0.07355093456237148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345519557913115,0.0,0.0,0.028798723729961187,0.0,0.07924175256987186,0.1395718511534323,0.03718628114353231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537032754314685,0.0,0.14767548232870062,0.0,0.11073549137900912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03726964640686909,0.0,0.07147109819087206,0.0,0.060780562807679836,0.0,0.06483424856975277,0.07056618374713544,0.0,0.0,0.0911896309095656,0.12884101919080196,0.034632572450588754,0.07902519560431531,0.03296705611782741,0.030680871907500167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130695901174512,0.06920269381876466,0.08199697633692267,0.030253556509451458,0.05769647484727228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03189632024090014,0.0,0.032311370089342845,0.035611365295321724,0.0,0.07668081759141493,0.0,0.04274277306393386,0.0,0.0,0.25326597931021266,0.03582535483981752,0.07104278576061238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03764739990929187,0.6442850826582558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929186434427885,0.029401623025938663,0.04068819734534628,0.03819260862045707,0.03918983907671895,0.0,0.0,0.15859651938490954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06057893416562157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032554316233380884,0.03413002617758825,0.024076807593197757,0.0,0.036236865897206816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269955615792859,0.038264256034773285,0.0,0.0,0.11516197484883713,0.0,0.05303076553907605,0.10698091430191102,0.055638358904903935,0.20901807008487652,0.11508161863515208,0.03384897389805227,0.0,0.0,0.04106559722138351,0.03784908690802595,0.0,0.024441765010356796,0.05486527070928696,0.0,0.0,0.04005113787563522,0.0,0.0,0.02500619124504879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681950583247404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038889241679989785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672914050164042,0.03607946510506585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035614481347703564,0.0,0.0,0.0616066604924939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05748576846393181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553644089249525,0.0,0.0,0.1021212889343092,0.07689101075332241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03399526927592954,0.07498046687003858,0.0,0.0,0.12610604498777533,0.033208137446121035,0.0,0.0,0.04792621736887423,0.04622401995248408,0.035438301172687904,0.028635316054861106,0.021032534543586542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04007476846592745,0.024488961427297527,0.0,0.035234859802861465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02863045223255292,0.028932940962769382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040270536538719766,0.0,0.0,0.03911605549936235,0.07877752258612616,0.036630535410001386,0.1102743300911668,0.0,0.03943655915008939,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Opiodxs,2020/03/10,"Nauseous when about to eat hey, sorry if im posting this in the wrong place. im rarely on reddit so i dont know much.

so i have anxiety and depression, i take meds for it and i think they are preventing me from eating. may be another reason but im not sure what reason is. 

meds i take:

hydroxozine (anxiety) - 25 mg 50 mg / 25mg when i wake up, 50 when i go to sleep

bupropion (depression/anxiety) - ? / when i wake up

buspirone (anxiety) - 30 mg / when i wake up

--------------------------

i need answers on what to do please

--------------------------",-0.8943365695792878,1.2405073980582555,2.210330097087379,91.44591585760521,96.37864077669904,6.630161812297735,20.458899676375406,7.793537801064563,1.2478639482200649,374,14,84,10,15,132,62,103,0.11,0.8590000000000001,0.031,-0.5547,0,0,0,0,0,0,74.0,0,0,1,0,8,3,0,0,1,0,7,6,4,2,1,14,13,11,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,2,1,5,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,12,1,12,11,1,14,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,2,5,49,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507699276572715,0.4399770773690215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238408391837722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16851362838775852,0.0,0.0,0.294253595660985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171568856445846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4659337690455829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901985636432249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31942293844637737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569769068849516,0.10661392000011484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15022354451730402,0.15783151514051222,0.0,0.0,0.13770520486435275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29566753736561285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388771206025286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095427413909605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13551459875311872,0.0,0.2162151568447339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213090012280473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15720509362789473,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bubonicbumhole,2020/03/10,"I have completely lost all of my motivation Hi All,

I have always found it difficult to verbalise how I'm doing, so apologies if I ramble or don't make sense. 

I have struggled with my mental health for many years. It's a constant up and down, with some good spells followed by some very long bad spells. Some spells are worse than others, and some have brought me to some incredibly dark places. I've managed, through a lot of trial and error and self care over a long period of time to remain ""functional"" for the most part.

I'm just coming out of a particularly long and bad few months. Whatever it was, this past winter was brutal for me and I feel like I've been put back several years to when my mental health was at it's absolute worst.

I'm coming out the other side of this episode though. I've climbed my ladder and things are improving. But what I'm finding so incredibly difficult at the minute is trying to motivate myself. I feel I have completely lost the ability to motivate myself into doing almost anything. It's just completely gone. I've never felt like this before, usually it comes back when things start to improve but it's just this weird hole in my spirit that I can't put my finger on. Maybe I'm being too hard on myself and should just give myself more time, but I'm kind of lost, but feeling ok. I'm used to having no motivation when I'm in one of my bad episodes, but not when I'm feeling better.

Has anyone else ever felt like this?",4.290014727540502,5.5228184432989735,5.223220422189495,82.29577319587631,70.75257731958762,8.291998036327932,25.884634266077565,8.704169506293173,1.7697149729995083,1161,35,228,20,21,380,152,291,0.125,0.752,0.12300000000000001,-0.4232,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,9,16,20,1,1,8,1,20,3,1,7,4,56,50,23,0,2,12,0,8,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,18,16,0,0,12,0,0,9,5,12,0,1,12,8,21,8,35,36,13,45,1,3,0,0,4,14,0,10,25,150,39,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09883269536276497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212539476052637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901256856430082,0.10112869087955152,0.08122078832822892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15178672976456115,0.2472283866369007,0.0,0.0,0.08398549781504128,0.0,0.0,0.08729115993659141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006301105996568,0.0,0.0,0.2550610992808601,0.3104517691628241,0.10665845183257276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245026955354673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927880931752466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996205257990805,0.0705105167627655,0.1895328518550917,0.0,0.09020901020554213,0.0,0.0,0.10821825390025673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468098229086516,0.0,0.08278395796581997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08841483157388659,0.0,0.0,0.20982463923834055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277972035471188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446578971102017,0.0,0.0,0.26203627258976325,0.0,0.0,0.3232245387189329,0.08391027870338183,0.0,0.0,0.06588228485215397,0.10006519728478898,0.0991563151363792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989305620723152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878052355735916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612267938534488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668809317210591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688129493068944,0.09421927191410033,0.0,0.0,0.10311934772450132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843931874849666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296448233845604,0.11150166803216802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06985959227563962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318152432576076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114233240267634,0.0,0.0969711720915637,0.0,0.11510424931541345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701007707277795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524416353403333,0.10870289871716893,0.08143693241336479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058261529377714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271177164542561
mentalhealth,Ylisya,2020/03/10,"Urges to withdraw not going away In the past, I have gone through periods where my insecurities and anxiety have caused me to feel the need to withdraw in order to save the people that I care about from having to go through problems that occur when I am a part of their lives. I feel like I cause them stress, anxiety, and unnecessary conflict (amongst other things). These moments have typically been infrequent and short-lived, but lately, I have not been able to shake them.  


 I am not suicidal and don't self-harm at all. I just feel like my presence in their lives seems to do more harm than good, and withdrawing is the only thing I can think of to fix that. To be clear, the problems that I cause are never on purpose. I don't have malicious intent. The result seems to be the same, though: people getting hurt as a result of me being a part of their lives, and I just can't do that. That seriously goes against everything I strive for.   


People in my life have told me that they want me there, and I know they are being sincere, but I just feel like I can see how many difficulties I am causing them and they are either unable to or choose not to see that, for whatever reason. I acknowledge that my withdrawal might be difficult for them in the short term, but when I think about all of the difficulty I would be saving them in the long term, it feels like the right thing to do. Again, I am not talking about suicide here, just seclusion.  


Let's say that all of the issues are just me having bad headspace. Wouldn't it still make sense to withdraw, then, since I am in such a terrible place that I need to protect them from being around me while I am like this? I feel like I have lost all perspective on this.  


Have any of you been in a similar situation and felt like this? How did you deal with it? Does it ever really go away?",6.342900552486189,5.937759505524862,6.333088397790058,81.89554419889504,65.82320441988949,9.7814364640884,29.97845303867404,9.255337874911486,2.22046364640884,1439,43,299,23,20,456,169,362,0.124,0.74,0.136,0.7867,0,0,0,0,0,1,41.0,0,2,12,1,21,24,0,3,17,0,44,1,0,11,7,70,70,21,2,7,15,0,7,7,0,3,1,1,0,0,23,11,0,2,15,0,0,5,10,12,0,0,8,10,50,12,50,51,11,39,0,2,2,0,18,18,0,4,22,231,73,0,0.0873324941329563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059389090769240774,0.0,0.13361823794432676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774443534230084,0.0,0.0,0.16410350609564514,0.0,0.07291898472030157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904129817417257,0.35885811326890243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003596669412905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07642525413904254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07899724082290653,0.0,0.0,0.07848881449497172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649475984888014,0.31195175629220706,0.08385288993157508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04562762366870116,0.0,0.14889920698162842,0.07325035261660423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349124122293584,0.0,0.0,0.09115243418050438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047995654833439656,0.0,0.09851485731766728,0.0,0.0,0.08930339220845404,0.06168552333479582,0.29866371709084066,0.0,0.23134857697459246,0.07728650911434534,0.0,0.0,0.09533373380253457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05829511798167915,0.08854144167384713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264597523545803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951187562714406,0.06735620335282179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642029714101845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18914516131313192,0.08336874752759599,0.18163606573585725,0.0,0.09124386859508052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16713080474855996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594743201789011,0.0897923491750373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745814728129037,0.0,0.06945030460417459,0.0,0.0,0.13918538169566835,0.15900844535910374,0.09110683788992137,0.0,0.0,0.0722423416158744,0.0981653824935086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974384262656053,0.0,0.1000390769636041,0.0,0.0,0.19105514788816014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701945506879882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740594855725466,0.11191827181768256,0.08580373207433771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344994069585544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051510967746518165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06203849814038539,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,randomnamedunno,2020/03/10,"I cant stop doing things for attention I ruin every relationship i have because i constantly look for them to tell me how much they like me. And when they dont feel like talking to me i feel like they hate me. 

I nearly cheated on someone i genuinely care about last week, and she found out. Its like i wanted her to find out because i wanted to see how she would react to prove she actually liked me. Even though she has said that she does.

I feel like im going crazy when im not having people who want to talk to me, but only people who i like. 

I constantly make posts on social media, in hopes that they will become famous. I live my life as though im going to be famous, and have always thought i was going to end up famous. 

I really fucked up something with someone i care about and i hate myself. I've literally never cared for someone like i have for her, and i still threw that away.

What is wrong with me. Please.",3.2289248120300726,4.331567847368422,4.608120300751882,86.19684210526316,73.15789473684211,7.112781954887217,21.99248120300752,7.447530270364453,0.7023007518796995,721,16,151,8,14,240,103,190,0.135,0.7040000000000001,0.161,-0.139,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,5,0,10,18,4,0,0,0,13,2,0,4,2,30,36,13,0,5,2,0,3,8,0,2,1,1,0,0,8,9,0,1,8,0,0,4,4,6,0,0,5,6,40,12,27,28,1,24,0,1,2,1,20,9,1,1,18,105,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.09670666790882372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245859580454007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310709912878938,0.0,0.0,0.12082008486017258,0.10944744347520424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031151682095151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141823779220943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867225068173676,0.0,0.11614369721844625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777260764172252,0.0,0.0,0.06545418439660064,0.0,0.08349547438990809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503228230971121,0.21238978096838534,0.0,0.0,0.0905750082804077,0.0,0.0,0.1086573194936222,0.0,0.09161574989961728,0.0,0.0,0.1689613287915548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19568017811309232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842801248820937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211329025054142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077919482752166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06999679985626461,0.38731948390311066,0.0,0.0875065394281232,0.0,0.08321849309290172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614958397636221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284942293074115,0.0,0.07643152607421955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536951936259165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740601957218473,0.0,0.0,0.10878132458122247,0.0,0.0,0.09490978131672187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348557959334343,0.0,0.0,0.10639561232122932,0.0,0.0,0.09426617299625444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896934952300133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010193049027742,0.251899666645702,0.07629151926280081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07914086692662299,0.08285149188637879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15930460341043953,0.08661719769695009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583720304778727,0.0,0.19472921153090345,0.07867381241173628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753540881960064,0.0,0.07949151898528957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039733316595316,0.10834957961680244,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,talkgeekytome44,2020/03/10,"Why am I laughing instead of crying? I've been having a tough time, long work days with nothing accomplished, I can't sleep and I'm constantly on edge. 

I was having a shower just before bed instead of crying a little bit I went into a full blown fit of laughter. I found my life really amusing because of how y'know shitty it is..suddenly it's the most hilarious thing. 

My partner comes into the bathroom asking me if I'm okay. I can't stop laughing, I laugh for quite some time even after getting out of the shower. But then I noticed when I looked in the bathroom mirror that my eyes were bloodshot and really red. I had tears falling down my face. 

It's been about an hour or so (no I haven't been laughing the whole time) and I'm finally back down to earth. I feel very hopeless, I've never done that before.",2.104207317073172,4.294244847560975,3.7331097560975617,86.55442073170731,79.1829268292683,5.807317073170732,23.664634146341466,6.9077264865688965,0.9520926829268288,641,22,123,7,16,213,107,164,0.141,0.71,0.149,0.3154,2,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,3,9,8,0,0,10,1,13,4,3,1,1,19,23,10,0,1,4,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,3,1,6,8,0,1,2,1,0,3,5,2,0,0,9,4,17,6,17,14,5,27,0,1,3,0,2,10,0,4,14,84,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15437547686369665,0.0,0.0,0.12697577876884025,0.0,0.10066250938465668,0.0,0.2810291520713277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802806138301373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224599548352715,0.0,0.17844827416371098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36277796392196143,0.10649602921897093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689866549453737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906766799101636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349534824585687,0.0,0.0,0.180893270467419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810579500237368,0.0,0.0,0.08627429007649896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626210699142084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907518453640644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663712255427905,0.0,0.1655049467763826,0.0,0.14613600644087232,0.1386687048206604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735944060350446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15844793848107586,0.1880030825173477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17563746675165334,0.0,0.0,0.21157468177584174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16525055847326015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380571630817426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109705899930916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888681715278595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625061861167634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15307837190974824,0.1490053160847165,0.18436320219798152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021755501268815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MentalFail3,2020/03/10,"how to deal with mental health problems Hey guys. I've always been on reddit, but this is my first post. I guess I didn't even have an account, so I just made one. Please bear with me if I do something wrong lol. If anyone actually reads all of this through, you get a gold sticker or something. Also I apologize if anyone is offended by my language. I swear a lot when I get upset lmao

Basically, I've struggled my whole life with depression and anxiety. I've never been diagnosed, because I will never talk about my problems with anyone. Thank God this shit's pretty much anonymous right

 I grew up in a very Catholic family, and I consider myself Catholic as well, even though I don't practice my faith as much as I should. I got to college last semester, and it started off great. I was fun, bubbly, and had a lot of friends. I kept myself busy, and rarely felt anxious or depressed. Then, I was almost expelled from my college (small private Catholic school with very strict rules). I guess this is where it started to get bad for me. It got to the point with my school that the Head of Security, VP of Student Affairs and the Head of Student life called a meeting with me and my parents. They listed about 15 offenses (I was only guilty of several, maybe 5-7 at most) which I was accused of. Not only did they tell my parents these offenses, but acted as though I was already guilty of them. I really don't give a fuck about getting in trouble, It was all stuff that most people in college do (drink, shake vending machines, go clubbing, etc.). Seeing the look of disappointment on my parents faces absolutely destroyed me. I was walking to the Student Union, where my meeting was, and I saw my parents outside. They wouldn't talk to me or look at me. After the meeting, it basically ended with them saying that they were just extremely concerned for me, and accused me of being the leader of the ""less than optimal students at our University"" or something like that. My mom was crying profusely the entire meeting and my dad looked like his entire life was a failure. Over the next few weeks, me and my parents repaired our relationship to an extent. I continued doing what I did best: smoking weed every night, drinking every weekend, rarely doing homework and occasionally dipping classes. Then, I was falsely accused of rape twice. The first girl and I were plastered and the next morning I wake up to my friend who sent me videos of her and I making out and bunch of other stuff. She then dropped everything when it eventually came out that she made the first move on me. The second girl wasn't so nice. Her mom got involved, somehow contacted my mom, told her every detail of our sexual encounters (which were 100% consensual), and she even read every text message I had ever sent to her. It turns out that the girl wrote about the stuff we did in her diary, her mom read it, and the girl figured that the only way for her to get out of it was for her to say I raped her, rather than to tell her mom that she's just an easy girl. Anyways, she eventually texted her friend that it was all consensual (she didn't know that I was friends with him). She never filed any reports or anything like that, but my mom's trust for me was completely destroyed. I think she had to go on heart meds because her blood pressure was so high. After that, I ended the fall semester without getting in anymore trouble then i'd already gotten in. Break was ok, but I was sober for a week which sucked. Then this semester came. I had planned out all my classes and tried to change my life. Worked for a day, then missed 6 of my classes the following week. I then started smoking weed again every night, and until recently, would smoke anywhere from 1-4 times per day. This semester has been the worst 2 months of my life. Whenever I'm sober, I'm miserable. All I can think about is the bad things in my life. I have 0 motivation or drive to do anything. I eat one meal a day at most, and that's on a good day. The only way I can escape this is to smoke, get drunk as shit, then smoke more. When I wake up in the morning, I'd say it's a 50/50 chance that I can get out of bed to go to class. The other 50% of the time, I'll sleep until my friends drag me out of bed to smoke, drink, play video games, or do some other dumb shit that's distracting enough to keep my mind off of my own misery. My best friend has helped me so much through all of this. Although I haven't really made any progress, I have an amazing group of friends who all love and support me with everything I do.

I'm the type of person where I won't tell anyone (unless I absolutely trust you) anything about myself. I've told maybe 4 people that I have depression anxiety in my entire life. I hate asking for help, and I'd honestly much rather wallow in self-pity than to ask someone to help me. However, it's come to the point now that I can't deal with this anymore. I'm sick and fucking tired of being a loser. I want so much more with my life. I haven't even tried talking to a girl in months. I have 0 confidence and 0 ambition. I'm failing all my classes, and I can't have my life turn out the way it's going. So I scheduled a meeting with my university counselor. I have a meeting with him on Thursday, so I guess if anyone actually reads this I'll let you know how It goes. I think that I really mostly wrote this for myself. I read somewhere that writing about your problems helps you feel better, and I feel okay now so I guess that's a start. I've been sober since Saturday at midnight-ish, so like three full days. I guess I'll keep you updated on that too. I guess really what I'm asking in like 150,000 words is how the fuck do I get my shit together. If anyone has ideas that worked for them, please let me know. I would love to hear them.

​

Thank you to anyone who read all of this. I know it's a lot and I'm fucking tired of writing, but I just had to let someone hear this. Anyways, I hope y'all have a great day!!!",4.269832837626659,5.240431442677828,4.9256460150224335,85.3918223521702,70.55648535564853,7.733931542067852,28.707213792408126,7.9456036686751785,1.722118112617835,4694,171,958,59,83,1509,422,1195,0.152,0.696,0.153,-0.311,6,0,10,0,0,0,160.0,4,8,8,13,47,76,18,6,53,3,81,40,12,8,13,147,169,80,0,16,26,12,3,5,7,6,14,5,3,8,66,54,6,4,13,16,1,17,16,40,1,8,54,13,167,36,143,104,36,126,1,8,5,8,120,47,10,29,61,651,233,29,0.0,0.0,0.0725585645187375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0372272856063546,0.0,0.08205124617211806,0.02973034587031177,0.030934151042455206,0.04028114528254652,0.04517399112399632,0.05056312072724484,0.0,0.05688043889063811,0.04199930424018672,0.07373897121840936,0.18196462351440584,0.0,0.09178023952003024,0.0,0.10426612221017983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062082301310972976,0.04532537472365075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802970581466076,0.03287993846511801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037961761786590685,0.0850409173023489,0.0,0.0,0.039328220628364066,0.032024599265614614,0.03897926232879916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040837068479519394,0.1438561126810075,0.07665548326776718,0.0960612038356233,0.03773376125088754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925759778635556,0.0,0.038041240162853214,0.0,0.0,0.06585538052613088,0.03841366585583199,0.04146206013159544,0.09821994210450416,0.03362862583944995,0.15661566819918232,0.0,0.06682438393387638,0.0,0.03504706366845305,0.0,0.03759550571567628,0.0,0.0356956449578661,0.0,0.0,0.09486793210383734,0.0,0.0,0.2010594134442968,0.13747774468439453,0.17481051761845245,0.035663460925504306,0.08451393436387893,0.03118221187337065,0.0892012664265864,0.08197530595921197,0.2457272172172983,0.03681096649914187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03670448257519112,0.07630843029303333,0.03951729609065625,0.08380211496811034,0.04405479419646427,0.09967554408413673,0.03927942592535445,0.0,0.03692504068752641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041968184144219586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608905683398866,0.0,0.0,0.08172578695154202,0.030304127659482764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404766792440695,0.2363322346571757,0.0908137540107503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365767424527012,0.0,0.0,0.09481938843620197,0.06710719024818533,0.1055330179624432,0.02481586306624564,0.0,0.07469836676429223,0.0,0.041295144372552016,0.0,0.037465561487098696,0.0,0.03753806142581286,0.2612467487217906,0.059348478556072615,0.03951315104262671,0.13664646058471747,0.0,0.0860193294192047,0.0,0.07907608953657344,0.06977598653272493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05038404624421474,0.1130988018028458,0.0,0.0,0.20640268634490566,0.0,0.0,0.05154754967770734,0.03246142677134965,0.0,0.08161812343179888,0.0702883562378723,0.0,0.035605184420278685,0.037822262932585365,0.0,0.10671978996839404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22312170633543374,0.0,0.09526587199294362,0.0,0.03670769427711279,0.039914067292644864,0.0,0.03174886132292598,0.0,0.08869366639799375,0.0,0.07524999585271114,0.02962516838947264,0.0,0.03878360472973872,0.04199930424018672,0.152646175249273,0.03075310796502549,0.0,0.03720373916704054,0.0,0.06299971728868745,0.08586175972707706,0.0,0.0,0.1052559776678325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03886535787853534,0.12767593525543933,0.0,0.042187894729471175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08964412895178663,0.09748272270302707,0.06845497172813123,0.0,0.0,0.0246986740851208,0.0714643508117951,0.07305221224181355,0.0,0.04335628759330908,0.08545873328764013,0.0,0.0710482240329456,0.0,0.05048133653616769,0.08087556241825145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061349656219128176,0.02192789321413035,0.08852785561925362,0.08946317715792658,0.0,0.033426489289821656,0.0,0.0,0.0415066705368136,0.0,0.035837195744324465,0.0,0.054130438061001984,0.0,0.0,0.0528187926533121,0.0406470935934632,0.04517399112399632,0.0
mentalhealth,Tigermypet,2020/03/10,"depression has ruined my relationships so last summer I went through my first and only major depressive episode. I could barely leave my house and function and felt the worst I have ever felt, I can barely explain it. I went to therapy and was put on medication, and I’m fine now. But the problem is, during this time I basically destroyed my closest relationships because I could not bear to see them looking and feeling the way I was. I didn’t even feel like a whole person. I couldn’t let them see me like that or tell them I was depressed. Idk why, but I couldn’t. I ended up breaking up with my new boyfriend (we were doing a somewhat long distance relationship) because I was becoming so detached from him and never wanted to visit him, and stopped talking to my best friend because I couldn’t see her when I was that way. I basically lost two the people I really really cared about. I have started talking to them again, but I don’t think they trust me or feel like it’s the same because I literally broke off connection with them all summer.

How do I repair this??? I feel so frustrated with myself and feel like I’m such a horrible person for doing this to them.",4.487724458204337,5.97672964035088,5.4774303405572775,79.67995356037152,70.57894736842105,8.17172342621259,29.639834881320947,8.671277953709913,2.348938286893705,930,37,173,16,17,306,124,228,0.162,0.7020000000000001,0.136,-0.6215,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,7,3,11,19,2,0,8,0,22,1,0,1,3,42,43,19,0,7,6,0,7,4,1,0,1,0,0,2,7,13,0,1,9,0,0,4,7,10,0,2,12,11,43,9,17,25,7,27,0,6,4,0,22,5,0,3,19,131,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577993755864891,0.11676652362932675,0.0,0.0,0.11095335426824644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779513078701952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688278855702587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731860300979269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364222624831567,0.0,0.0,0.0698313028272378,0.09563559922118152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672922716428833,0.22659292524901276,0.2030278853159293,0.0,0.0,0.0899308382580568,0.0,0.0,0.08168396929621446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199409278748766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618114285805792,0.0,0.11194901236362692,0.0,0.10811242693255196,0.0,0.20661035211625264,0.0,0.0,0.09356455407643152,0.08878356434456808,0.0,0.1154128759843254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650824447533393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154273240190188,0.10211123459640613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040970610315698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329738695459878,0.1846324625736361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011659046186085,0.0,0.10628425324345316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354621029843805,0.0,0.0,0.34053182200582216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527508032426307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483370376128867,0.0,0.0,0.08839202066211413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699577819978942,0.09240955056093524,0.0,0.12090737463427995,0.0,0.0,0.06774522045065863,0.0,0.0,0.06164992533129051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327934902012444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06236018138842087,0.16784142098330124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960188998633517,0.09540164873826018,0.11803977145589058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,usernamefoundme,2020/03/10,"Mentalhealth - assistance to countries and people who cannot afford it hello together

I was and am affected by this myself and I want to help people who do not have the possibilities to be cured or simply do not have the money.

Where I live, I am lucky that everything is paid for by the state and so I don't have to think about who pays for everything.

Unfortunately there are countries that do not offer this possibility.

I would like to help these people who unfortunately do not have this possibility.

Now to my question and please:

Can you help me find out how I can help with donations? I would like to start or better said im starting a business model that donates an big amount of my sold (money) goods every month. Are there any organizations or do I have to look elsewhere? I would like to find a reliable source where I can donate and also make 100% sure that it arrives and helps.

I also see the problem that I cannot give money to individuals.

I thought that it might be possible to donate to this support line for suicid. but that's not what I'm really looking for. I'm looking for something that a normal citizen can and may afford therapy and medication.

thank you very much for your help and apologize for the rather bad english.",5.2079891705636205,6.573539033472805,6.235200590696532,75.39960374107801,68.70711297071132,9.138173763229142,28.70317499384691,9.478462496947786,2.5714093526950528,995,35,183,21,17,331,124,239,0.048,0.8109999999999999,0.141,0.9357,2,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,3,0,1,11,11,0,0,9,0,30,1,0,3,1,40,48,18,1,7,10,0,0,3,0,5,1,1,0,1,21,12,0,0,5,0,10,0,8,2,0,0,5,5,21,9,25,36,2,9,0,0,4,0,20,4,0,7,7,136,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690939264024517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189553606462433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827462127892165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935037540294768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907652264613773,0.0,0.1900347461158812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19325854090216465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141951700292644,0.0,0.08867577024804554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4251849908425889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141994120897365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495333593503666,0.0,0.09335569739569616,0.0,0.2663430816603619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057118913519479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650520084138086,0.0,0.11215581797108418,0.0,0.0,0.08438740764095243,0.0,0.07771886223611373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358648285852703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21988587711318044,0.0,0.0,0.11605254288737013,0.0,0.4767489841485263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116301365008576,0.0,0.0,0.11843440172071833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677291159750947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056716193327607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424786016889335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139103697508328,0.0,0.0,0.1496631305503538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564423783399293,0.11997365919619506,0.09964305145052936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973359005119871,0.12090391952343454,0.0,0.0,0.06774328452866367,0.0,0.08393256861115646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723287561794002,0.062358399352050564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253086058066397,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mando1990,2020/03/10,Psychologist or Psychiatrist How do I know which one I need? I know o don't need a therapist. Talking about my issues isn't gonna help. They're more physical. Any advice or answers thank you,0.700614035087721,3.2016571315789486,3.027368421052632,84.63824561403509,96.10526315789473,6.743859649122808,22.12280701754386,7.793537801064563,1.6870912280701762,153,6,30,4,6,52,31,38,0.071,0.85,0.079,0.0624,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,8,9,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,5,1,1,8,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31433549146844897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21874892030976825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21561087741509846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33574342193700923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3535665401974111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.477033451662202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217974198551015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25854886774221303,0.0,0.2961536182891448,0.0,0.3734875722303298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sleepdeprived-eyes,2020/03/10,"I’m exhausted and afraid of what’s to come. I’ve (26F) had mental health issues for nearly my entire life, been on fluoxetine for my entire adult life and have struggled with my own brain for really as long as I can remember. 

However, yesterday may have been the worst day yet. What started with a bad morning because of a hangover, turned in to me calling out of work and having the most scary and intense panic attack that I’ve had to date. The effects which haven’t worn off just yet and the actual event happened around 12:30pm or so and it’s now 5:03am. It got to the point where I was actually afraid that I was having a complete mental break down...I didn’t feel like myself, I was doubting reality and my long term relationship and I made it even worse by researching different illnesses that I could potentially have outside of just anxiety, a panic disorder or depression. 

Easy to say, I have decided to completely cut drinking out of my life for the time being, if not indefinitely because I usually have emotional break downs after I’ve had too much and those include fits of crying and also hitting myself in desperation or anger. 

Next step once I cut out drinking and see what those side effects are on me, I’m in the market for potentially having my medication either switched to something else entirely or getting the dosage increased. Biggest goal here is to actually reach out to a psychiatrist and get help. 

If any of you have any advice on similar experiences, I would really love to not feel alone and I’d be interested in hearing your stories as well. Ive never experienced anything like this and it’s exacerbated my anxiety to a nearly unmanageable degree.",7.1431578947368415,7.763399611464973,7.878830036875629,68.01047100234666,64.03184713375796,11.19651357693597,35.63459604425076,10.992663274268294,4.200206369426752,1354,60,229,36,19,453,179,314,0.179,0.7390000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.9872,2,1,3,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,0,4,13,19,4,6,14,0,28,11,1,3,1,47,45,25,0,4,11,0,2,2,0,2,7,2,0,1,14,22,2,0,6,2,0,3,5,14,1,0,12,6,24,5,46,27,7,42,0,1,1,1,9,21,0,10,18,165,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.31440080424545114,0.0,0.0,0.10494338865024302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122696343029738,0.0,0.08588230040215875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14606211251326834,0.0,0.16431100267456086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837545018620692,0.09560271352166408,0.0,0.12217526474878612,0.0,0.0,0.08966883322017677,0.13093179153842674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988632430234546,0.10966046085615158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250972949947132,0.2251994464766295,0.0,0.0,0.08574472870258174,0.0,0.11796638350594588,0.0692597272937339,0.0,0.09249760273887107,0.0,0.0,0.11220303281510316,0.1230819072436063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21040889501111887,0.0,0.0,0.0897132352412331,0.12080289127885425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093219340684725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505115326829127,0.0,0.0,0.10860245386075383,0.07672172100311563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11221702531035553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589214975745314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496744895056967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415394589565883,0.12103993750059965,0.0,0.07198339583000518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209059546696036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275649719434651,0.10493378229262043,0.0,0.0,0.19007919878551055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692655270779454,0.10161803914125264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081873470875782,0.2164541657474379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894635621139771,0.0,0.08282825368394008,0.0,0.11421388277540387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437024928606082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520055537580084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152128319541133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759766321355932,0.0,0.0,0.11530010220708405,0.12165555652705097,0.0,0.0,0.08540338026550147,0.0,0.0,0.0855784733278162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267652938522059,0.0,0.0,0.07601345719810919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227068649392664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06262183648406901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681295900653735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182784334947976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655938101428826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818352606347713,0.0,0.10944284204151417,0.07628904549779993,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TQL-ROSE,2020/03/10,"I'm a constant liar and a serial cheater to the person I love Will try to compress the past 5-6 years in paragraphs.

As a background, I'm a female in my 20's and diagnosed with Bi Polar disorder for a few years. Initially, it was diagnosed as Depression when I was in college. It was never really clear to me when exactly it became manic depression. Apart from my downs, my mania usually manifests in hypersexuality or overspending. Occasionally, emotional verbal outbursts.

I never liked the label and the idea of medication, but I was never upfront about it with my psychiatrist. I missed a lot of meds I had to take, and might have also caused some emotional withdrawal symptoms along the way.

Right now I'm in a crumbling relationship, for around a year. I've cheated on my partner (let's call him ""P3"") several times over the course of over half a year. For the first few months, I didn't do anything--until P3 accused me of cheating. We had a fight. A few times prior, he opened my phone while I was sleeping and went through my messages. We also fought about that. I wanted to break up then and there but P3 convinced me that he'll get better. P3 did, but I didn't. 

I went through my old ways, from the year before I met P3. I got on dating apps. It was easy to get matches and engage with people. Slept with some of them, but never aimed for anything long term. 

I think there are 3 instances/periods this happened. After the first, we made up and started exploring the swinger community. Basically this is couples switching partners with consent. I prefer intimate conversations from someone new, though. There's a certain excitement I feel first hand getting to know someone personally.

For the most recent one, I met up with someone, had a drink and a quick dinner. He noticed I was acting weird the day after. He checked my location history and messages while I was asleep and confronted me in the morning. I don't think I properly owned up or apologized for this well. Simply put, I'm not sure how to. 

I wasn't always like this. With my first relationship (P1), I survived 2 instances when I found out he denied my existence and flirted with other girls. I grew some sort of dependency to P1, and when he stopped responding to my messages (this was long distance and I was a teenager), I grew depressed, to the point that I wanted to take my life. I mustered the courage to break up.

I then met P2. This was also long distance. But he promised to see me every 6 months. I never cheated on P2 for a period of over a year, though he claimed that I did, even though I had chat history documenting we separated. After breaking up with P2, I slept with someone. That someone then ghosted me after a few days. I got sad. To cope, I went through dating apps and ghosted people I met there. Didn't do much but make me feel mildly empowered. P2 heard about this and called me a slut and a meat hole for men. Then proceeded to ask me to fuck when he visits a few months after.

Emotions are a mess right now. But considering some sort of isolated retreat might help me. I guess this would be some form of catharsis to me.. I just want to stop thinking and feeling. this whole thing feels like a self-fulfilling prophecy based on other people's assumptions.",3.655188541362179,5.839706073954988,4.680352528500438,81.64952031569719,74.27331189710611,7.610453083893597,28.99397836889798,8.465940331813641,2.3109282315112543,2566,110,474,48,55,836,283,622,0.138,0.767,0.095,-0.9802,1,0,1,1,1,0,89.0,4,0,1,6,26,30,8,0,38,0,34,16,5,5,9,91,79,47,2,5,11,0,5,3,2,5,5,1,0,6,22,36,2,2,12,2,1,9,11,16,1,6,36,7,69,14,85,36,17,100,0,5,1,4,44,27,1,15,62,331,91,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435621975033834,0.057003710941250126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05637581839068592,0.06098618116001739,0.06404524547726115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058294819217194364,0.0,0.0,0.060589298392554815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990759227453875,0.0,0.0,0.07037605267245238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403224758229775,0.0,0.0,0.0758022230037325,0.0,0.08836331355536058,0.0,0.17701617505517192,0.13906729918785699,0.0,0.0,0.07851550668567649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06711124881366139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23118508065725416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04524854408245546,0.0,0.0577205061593205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855776016385768,0.04894175702391588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330897081705107,0.0,0.07511491520844545,0.0,0.06333406085792342,0.10737699144802176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10958337922373657,0.0,0.07546871224098149,0.0,0.06058093784850276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045919119415027285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733660556589736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037649919092964224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005353928483084,0.048388858758608135,0.10040788207209328,0.0,0.0,0.18188089058670784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058242609197251126,0.06183067493491204,0.0648234335188596,0.04572927451748929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609636578871876,0.06901407821661461,0.0,0.1453512191471764,0.0,0.0,0.16404604954748586,0.0,0.050360879984233324,0.0,0.2641859576084092,0.06616495057209852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799621944446827,0.07188707550840012,0.0,0.04642244107837399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539814093980979,0.1424833811112993,0.11963617723822352,0.0,0.0,0.06476171167620448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886893876311029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043887645584639284,0.0,0.06764287117563134,0.14710278949093478,0.0,0.11701002630277887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05459159144667205,0.0,0.07146824201638922,0.07739395192567104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685569547553138,0.0,0.2902308252112766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04848994657701452,0.0,0.0,0.11455064080250645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456748865053667,0.07120550221779028,0.10301819740528198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04551332526462724,0.13169047990645405,0.20192475225209947,0.0,0.07989452440646462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04651208161307405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545130997565473,0.0,0.12122245908220128,0.1087560968898692,0.0,0.0,0.061596451463713925,0.1905213594554698,0.0,0.07648615428841059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04866574784197247,0.0,0.0,0.2646994240478132
mentalhealth,chaserofthelite,2020/03/10,"Covered up I was sexually abused by my older brother. My older sisters knew but never came forward. I don't think I wasn't even in school yet the first time it happened. Didn't have the memories come back until my early twenties, but they knew. All those years of being afraid when alone with men and having no idea why. I just wish they would've told someone. Maybe I could've gotten into therapy when I was younger and avoided some of my unresolved trauma.",3.5546348314606746,5.785792370786519,4.128525280898876,85.27795646067419,74.73033707865169,6.247752808988763,25.73174157303371,7.1686216300943375,1.2875719101123595,367,13,67,4,8,116,68,89,0.159,0.802,0.04,-0.8658,0,2,0,0,1,0,8.0,0,0,2,1,6,3,0,2,2,0,8,0,0,0,2,19,17,7,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,4,0,0,3,5,3,0,1,9,0,12,0,8,7,2,18,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,2,13,47,14,1,0.0,0.2766287405970746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24180885170591465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17952724283377966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26703227843628463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011173439604898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18641014505803485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420750245906198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19859302920545774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206460457715976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635639452011172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234556207826644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006969078744178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23628834780119906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19782192598686066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669980870521869,0.0,0.0,0.14960083553188186,0.0,0.0,0.13614067942633026,0.0,0.0,0.22309459662713485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21067414449935665,0.0,0.2684837995255581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585336793019342,0.0,0.0,0.15034972547176514
mentalhealth,Fabulous-Physics,2020/03/10,"Was I raped? Or am I just overconcerning ​

​

​

​

Went out for a couple of drinks with friends, remember being drunk, more than usual, and as the bar was close to my place, I remember running back, and no more memories from the moment I opened the gate, woke up, had my underwear down and pants up, glass of water was next to me, some water or pee in the floor, don't know what it was, no scratches, no pain whatsoever, just didnt know what happened. Im a male",13.689543859649124,7.341303357894741,11.913684210526315,66.04912280701754,57.526315789473685,15.192982456140351,46.403508771929815,11.20814326018867,4.937140350877193,389,14,76,6,3,122,66,95,0.171,0.7979999999999999,0.031,-0.9153,0,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,6,0,9,8,1,0,0,16,14,6,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,3,7,5,0,4,3,0,2,5,2,0,0,8,1,7,1,14,5,3,15,0,0,0,1,2,9,0,3,4,53,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4753732616732481,0.5331156140865044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434075591491479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136402287007818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744923846705197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474211914488325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096993808825032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847828681753407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055967386682336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166509117966118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671224314138814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459715549610562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24850274325952346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080218952169547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016788061965477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5331156140865044,0.0
mentalhealth,99throwaway9977,2020/03/10,"Fallout from a breakup and being cheated on Hey,

I was in a 3 year relationship with a girl I was head over heels for. We had a really good relationship - until she cheated on me, lied about it and dumped me. She confessed the cheating a month later and gave a half assed apology.

It’s been about 3 months. I’ve just graduated and I’m trying to find my feet with getting jobs at the moment. My self-esteem is in the toilet - we were each other’s first proper relationships and were virgins when we met.

I haven’t had any hookups or anything, can’t find a job and I’m just consumed with thoughts that she was more attractive than me etc. I’m doing very badly mentally at the moment and struggling to pick myself up.

I’m not sure if I’m looking to vent or not but I’m just struggling to come to terms with why she did what she did, why she ruining a loving relationship etc. I am going to the gym almost every day and trying to keep good habits so I don’t get more depressed.

Thanks",2.6187796312554847,4.338603532338311,4.108738659642963,86.66396839332752,75.86567164179105,6.719461515949664,24.26134035703834,7.510576382923642,1.0747796897863622,774,25,160,10,17,257,119,201,0.133,0.772,0.095,-0.5743,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,3,0,0,1,7,15,4,2,13,0,17,6,4,1,1,34,34,15,0,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,17,0,1,4,1,0,2,5,9,0,2,13,1,20,6,25,20,6,21,1,2,1,3,20,8,1,4,11,106,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670335536306648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604598682687949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412491907305696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564879706698876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899597204095753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160256591946151,0.0,0.10898168415938568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822328866245156,0.0,0.0,0.10660852834179152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23129560992079246,0.10762791429395337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132215322857655,0.0,0.07191095781241681,0.21225780003276448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298581672439421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25112664430093257,0.11246730882008484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625487362376268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419992130693175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751432917167566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20199300717922375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105953359539284,0.0,0.0,0.5433913507034822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200029957311693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645570940985416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925475713534657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164935136683393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045214332319707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718136205249625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440201544008483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283506008125844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148235329274006
mentalhealth,snazzybanazzy,2020/03/10,"Not sure how to start this, since I'm pretty sure no one else I've met has experienced this issue So for, close to 10+ years (I'm now 22, for context, M, if that's relevant). I have this weird, terrifying disconnect? I guess, I don't know how else to describe.  A good example is my mother, I love her to death, I know I do, of course that's my mom, why wouldn't I, but sometimes when I see her, she's just, a person, sometimes I see her (and it's been happening with other people close to, friends, other family, relationships, etc.) It's almost like I'm seeing them in a fog, where I can tell that this shape makes up another person, but I can't register WHO this person is, as a result I can't find any emotion, or connection to them, they're just a person, who happens to exist in front of me.  This specific issue is hard for me to share because I've never heard of anyone feeling something similar, and I thought maybe it was just a normal thing that happened to people sometimes.

A very heartfelt conversation with my girlfriend of two years has told me that this is NOT normal at all, and as a result I'm even more afraid.  I do have ptsd and bi-polar, as well as clinical depression, but to my knowledge, this isn't a side effect normally attributed to these illnesses.  So like any 20 something, I figured if I can't figure it out, maybe someone on Reddit will know.

Thank you in advance",5.0545279464098805,5.1544069501779415,6.225865606028888,79.86689972786269,68.46619217081852,9.316391040401927,30.052543437303747,9.168548406835145,2.4025254762403185,1087,38,219,19,17,366,153,281,0.08,0.8009999999999999,0.11800000000000001,0.9064,0,0,2,0,0,0,47.0,0,1,2,2,12,14,0,1,9,0,20,3,0,7,4,46,43,19,1,6,11,2,2,2,2,2,2,1,0,4,23,9,0,0,10,0,0,2,10,3,1,2,6,7,30,11,31,35,3,20,0,1,3,1,25,12,0,5,8,144,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190782022141767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384139975015084,0.10671457803050093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115985660873385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062037965749747515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765423650319032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003132851997133,0.1144774014556814,0.0,0.0,0.11350030229383655,0.0672180367109232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593957242489996,0.0,0.051457902116726316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301581385224336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862714605841832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535973520334196,0.0,0.0,0.11211098108916456,0.0,0.2699842693410592,0.0,0.09116581034106977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21244259902782195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677901706058709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943923191412968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185127747010904,0.0,0.06793217584369346,0.0,0.20448301849194198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11919163712196458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849119461025005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29913858281860056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896189505966263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110882219448487,0.3554460863491735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035365406991469,0.0,0.0,0.11896352734322788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926274982751093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24329222115632265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418508485654144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622927724765132,0.15669482982070068,0.30195899931370396,0.0,0.07203323499613452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19183378870864967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895134861528059,0.09369601944523487,0.0,0.0,0.06761137690748624,0.0,0.0,0.08079390583858563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09724546826165208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941437139000572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397079769304336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150333164765637,0.0,0.09183147481919364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107291415891084
mentalhealth,throwaway982370lkj,2020/03/10,"I can't deal with day to day life Feeling anxious every day. Struggling to get up in the morning. Leaving the house and going to practice makes me want to cry from anxiety. Can't keep up with deadlines, I'm 5 days late for a project and I just don't know what to write. Job hunting is a nightmare. Dirty dishes are piling up. Replying to texts and emails makes me anxious, and I procrastinate on it. Feeling tempted to self harm. Having suicidal thoughts.

I feel like an incompetent adult. I just want to sleep and find comfort.",2.1217647058823523,4.814199509803924,2.995588235294118,88.72514705882355,83.31372549019608,5.3607843137254925,28.10784313725491,6.816661863887847,1.5052196078431377,418,20,79,5,12,132,70,102,0.23,0.674,0.095,-0.9517,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,0,6,3,1,2,0,21,19,5,1,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,7,1,1,6,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,3,7,2,17,18,0,11,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,6,44,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13064068734916184,0.3858492009651233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875858484758381,0.4405371877470632,0.1760592080247033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388340837192098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590435026729552,0.1220000876789664,0.0,0.0,0.15608320091508102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922171418952009,0.0,0.09705409004585153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970488266573226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694656050366693,0.15179066792452525,0.0,0.0,0.09385223804292656,0.0,0.192639101848463,0.18082368602983145,0.0,0.0,0.12062184462136365,0.08343094023963167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279842751825601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815322380028947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17089608137819995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17852875843961544,0.0,0.18679767242630932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557448906215164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014523866189439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FL0TES,2020/03/10,"Should I be worried? For a long time now (maybe a few years) every night I've been experience visual and auditory hallucinations. I have become extremely paranoid recently as it's just now became a big issue again after a few months of it being very calm. I know the stuff I am seeing and the things I am hearing aren't real, rain sounding like voices, seeing shadows dash in the corner of my eyes. I'm a young teen and I don't know if I should be worried or not? Can someone provide some tips for when this happens? Or maybe an explanation of why this has been affecting me for so long?",3.7892307692307696,5.291889974358977,5.314188034188035,80.1169230769231,72.33333333333333,7.593162393162394,26.67521367521368,8.167268648758528,1.7425316239316238,465,16,89,7,9,157,82,117,0.071,0.882,0.047,-0.3736,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,9,0,14,1,1,1,0,15,21,9,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,6,9,2,9,14,3,16,0,0,3,0,1,3,0,4,14,63,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20225370146239927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429568946070224,0.0,0.0,0.1791371693665712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16194205829917702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20640184433566666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911410904103376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20128791693385106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946851198682615,0.0,0.0,0.3241301838823307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3679592257278715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461733446363563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17185595275459922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20844306724727746,0.0,0.0,0.18081967986103967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291863249354444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551662251717498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20964107746788896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166403880747828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10678510591542847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110217919685864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16524716145683552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719566555699408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793030140962335
mentalhealth,bro_ose,2020/03/10,"Any advice for anxiety induced loss of appetite? Current life events are spiking my anxiety and because of funds I have no chance to get my usual medication. My plan isn't to get back on medication any time soon, i've been off medication for a longer while now due to that reason too. But I haven't been able to eat anything the past day and struggle now (8am) with nausea too and am suspecting I wont feel much hunger throughout the day. I know it's an issue with my anxiety and not me being sick or having stomach issues as it's caused by things going on in my life right now. I have no possibility of resolving these things anytime soon, so does anyone have advice how to eat when anxiety makes you nauseous & lose appetite?",6.638958333333331,6.360688312500006,7.1633333333333375,75.765,65.18055555555556,9.977777777777778,33.27777777777778,9.516144504307137,2.9392527777777784,583,22,111,10,8,192,96,144,0.14,0.7979999999999999,0.062,-0.8185,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,4,11,4,0,1,4,0,12,10,1,5,0,18,18,11,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,6,6,3,0,6,0,1,1,6,3,0,0,2,1,12,1,18,14,1,22,0,2,0,0,1,5,0,1,16,74,18,0,0.13473508446791255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633231303535532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14598540772925953,0.0,0.1832489554021927,0.0,0.4122878833272382,0.0,0.0,0.09420990380671716,0.0,0.11087549434388604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036029632553958,0.0,0.08213325692579862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13841004623568676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17378596625274126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790758038158194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757352561227736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812610704329683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14078704129790026,0.0,0.07657305347435471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2812568458211823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404687879669701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19033474949903534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507340956197216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899367151174088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.407194268254861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904578990142884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286198837172095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15189356341912838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853010692964404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506302595560305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085436440904694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902400646243552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856511126408727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14839166031205026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TigersMeat,2020/03/10,"I’ve been on 10+ different combinations of psychiatric medications over the span of 5 1/2 years, AMA I’m 21 years old and if it helps I’ve had very little hours of talk therapy and have also been to inpatient 10+ times as well.",4.526875,4.766922937499999,6.383333333333333,77.795,69.625,11.4,28.5,11.20814326018867,3.1152,183,6,40,6,3,64,38,48,0.0,0.895,0.105,0.5719,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,3,5,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,7,2,0,9,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,18,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23366949976205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052832356250089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19585320858904406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287754773155236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928577363365775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29435731409334986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30661115835325714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348565430995777,0.0,0.0,0.3341522548488469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703821758021456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24109278011482296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26271981716007664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37633003544685095
mentalhealth,KelciRose,2020/03/10,"Suicidal My friend is severely depressed and suicidal. Plus he's suffering from PTSD which is new. I just need advice on how I should talk to him and encourage him to get help. It's a lot for me to deal with too bec I have my own level of depression/anxiety but I work through it in ways that works for me. He's just at a point where he doesn't care he doesn't have the energy, he's content with checking out.",1.494051724137929,3.3083182183908093,3.2995258620689683,90.7761853448276,79.45977011494253,8.02816091954023,23.518678160919546,8.841846274778883,1.5811160919540224,323,11,74,8,8,108,61,87,0.19899999999999998,0.732,0.07,-0.8824,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,1,0,13,10,5,2,2,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,10,3,15,9,2,9,0,2,0,0,12,7,0,1,1,49,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22057146103584646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17267556532304154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23013709409532845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327079250183359,0.19441273662720496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439109902973934,0.0,0.11792964542194795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512956937331481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19189949797780775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16736889128325813,0.0,0.21800226627057484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21337883261304372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638551863808713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25499991716984793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4938031840116193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18142558843943946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17916642714709224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286544258682158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lord_uroko,2020/03/10,Is it normal to think with no desire to do? I spend probably like an hour total a day thinking about suicide but never have any desire to do it. Is this normal?,1.9109090909090904,3.781606151515156,4.075757575757578,85.43363636363638,78.3939393939394,5.612121212121212,20.090909090909093,6.42735559955562,0.3514727272727272,125,3,24,1,3,43,26,33,0.115,0.687,0.198,0.4871,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,2,10,7,1,1,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,7,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096349102872848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19880934854238505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035849243020428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15060568177815906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377576666735929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6040804263981989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323683711211997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33719853485450474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3950553303328129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nailbitethrowaway10,2020/03/10,"My sister (with mental illnesses) is dating somebody, what should I do? I see my mom and dad in an unhealthy marraige everyday. I know that my dad is unhappy because my mom is oblivious to how she affects others, she's not self aware, and borderline emotionally/verbally abusive and toxic. My sister is a bit better than my mom, but overall they are very similar. I would describe the symptoms as: mostly anxiety, she can be very controlling, hold grudges, be extremely passive aggressive, selfish/one-sided, and has a difficult time seeing another perspective. She avoids change, because she holds a lot of fear/anxiety/grief in her daily life, and has rare instances of panic attacks. 

It might come across like i'm assuming things about their relationship and the ""ability"" of my sister to overcome her mental health issues, but I interact with her on a daily basis and have a lot of doubts that a marriage with her would be different than how she thinks and treats other people in her family. Knowing how unhappy my dad is, I feel like I do have some responsibility.

tldr: I see issues in my sister, and I can't see a healthy marriage as an outcome. What is my responsibility to let her boyfriend know what he is getting into?

I know the answer, which is that I have no responsibility to say anything to him, and it might be pretty bad if I did. But I just want to hear it from other people, what is the correct thing to do in this situation? 

Thank you for your time.",8.364619395203334,7.666074262773726,8.795411887382695,66.86270072992703,61.84671532846716,11.770177267987487,38.18456725755996,11.062562989136584,4.35522606882169,1164,51,198,27,14,389,151,274,0.147,0.7829999999999999,0.07,-0.9685,1,1,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,2,2,2,5,12,2,3,13,0,31,4,0,5,1,49,47,19,0,5,6,10,1,2,0,5,4,2,0,1,17,15,0,4,8,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,1,7,40,5,29,36,5,13,0,0,4,0,35,8,0,9,6,154,57,0,0.0,0.12915655940239934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430430808443988,0.08339075998630448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970422960361606,0.0,0.0,0.12401224523117847,0.0,0.0,0.09101705944946346,0.1329004318035025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640864628983728,0.11900841519989815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531592480901635,0.09390067035702827,0.0,0.0,0.1222616507578324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389007463793348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276296497007964,0.12266421534983095,0.055117679378801424,0.07787527941240628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05695213875949238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587032090028496,0.12285984763736735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22755189344978474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.239631606833104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146798311650984,0.0769955172314851,0.10651152644902973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853492698567042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21970868767238025,0.23128035224581306,0.0,0.38300627324179976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386658734417231,0.0,0.0,0.1278973063676851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511447318935262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090024310164892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703371037898168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668747277801324,0.0,0.0,0.34746079389017903,0.0,0.11371903369591113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122529468677633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330096666127945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10035984652343123,0.0,0.0,0.14484003589158387,0.06984787321562352,0.0,0.0,0.12712678886118445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988589950397327,0.06429569517002524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548721967278519,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Afun_artguy,2020/03/10,"My mind = wack I just created this Reddit account cus I thought why the hell not. I need to say things, and I want to write them down, but I also want people to hear them (and I can't for the life of me put them into words cus I'm just not good at it for some reason and I always blank and hide stuff). So here goes, also there will be poor spelling cus I'm to lazy to write a formal essay about my very unformal feelings. And to preface this, I'm newly 18 and a guy.

I've always been a weird kid. Like really weird. I regret a lot of things I did in elementary, more then a regular kid should I feel, but Idk. I was the outcast, and for good reason, because I had serious anger management problems (I feel this comes into play sooner). Kids would always let me hang around, but I knew they never wanted me there. I had a bully from grade 4 to 7 (or 6, honestly I've tried to forget a lot of elementary. And yes, where I live there is no middle school, just k-7, then HS is 8-12). This bully would sexually harass me and pick on me all while putting on a face like I was hurting him. I get how kids my age would think that because he was always a foot smaller than me (I was almost 5'8"" in grade 7). Anyways, I had to deal with him, all while kids scolded me for harassing him. This made me rude, and the fact that I was already dealing with depression that I didn't even know about didn't help my situation. So my elementary days were not fun, to say the least.

My family is well off I guess you could say. We have a nice house, and I have a loving mother and father. And so when I was in elementary school, I was always seen as the ""rich white kid"". So there was not a lot of sympathy. I can see how kids can do that.

Going into and through the beginning of high school, I had my first few crushes (awww little kids having feelings). But I was shy and weird, so I dealt with a lot of rejections. Surprisingly I was able to move on In literally a week, even though I was quite emotionful with my anger (but that had settled down now, even though it was still there, I just pushed it down \*foreshadowing\*). But then I had my first REAL crush, like I really liked this person. Thinking back on it today, I think I mostly liked her because she was the only girl who was really nice to me, and she was also drop-dead gorgeous (for a grade 9. She had a really nice body and personality). The more and more we talked, the more we grew closer. This girl is when I had my, technically first, sexual experience. We would sext, no nudes because she wasn't comfortable with that, but it was very close to such. I was a hormone racing teenager so I would literally pop one at any time. The only thing was, is she liked another guy, and then another, and another. She never ended up liking me, but she was very open to saying that she didn't like me, even though we would sext a lot. This drove me downhill, and really fast. I was hung up over this girl, and I got sad every time we would do anything over text, and I sometimes tried to put my arm around her only to be met with anger later that day because it made her uncomfortable (I'm 100% not blaming her for that, she has every right to be uncomfortable, I was just really confused and in the dark). This spiralled into my first really depressive episode, and I became really toxic. I'll spare details because this is super long already, but pretty much, I became really controlling, and an attention whore because some days she wouldn't talk to me (who would when someones in that state), and I started threatening suicide, and self-harm. Now obviously I never pursued suicide, but this was the first time in my life when it genuinely was a thought I had every single day. I came close once or twice, and I did self-harm, a lot, but thanks to my somewhat low pain tolerance at the time, I didn't do that much damage, but mostly I was scared. She eventually couldn't take it, and she told her parents, who told mine, and then the ""friendship"" ended. 

So coming out of that, I was an absolute train-wreck. I was ashamed mostly. For my family, teachers, friends, the whole lot. My grades suffered more than they were already suffering, and so did my mental state. One day my dad just came in one day, after 4 days of non-stop crying, and just told me to get a grip and get over her and become a better man, and so I did. Weird to type out that it was that easy, but it just kinda was. Well... not that easy, but the events coming after he said that really just made it feel that easy.

That following summer, my parents decided to book me into an art camp at a really good art uni and were excited to let me go explore my creativity. Now, I really didn't want to go. I was depressed and just didn't want to meet people while I was like this. I had no friends, so why would anyone want to be mine in this camp. Well, If I didn't go that first day, I don't think I would be here. I met a group of friends that pulled me out of such a darl place in life, and I met a girl who at the time was probably my bestest friend I have ever had, unfortunately, she lived quite far away, but she was in the main city for the remaining time at the camp. Again, to spare details, they helped me so much, and although our group split, they will always be in my hearts. 

Fast forward a month, and I'm just with my dad on the couch watching tv while he's on his phone. He's sitting on a chair just ahead of me, and so I can see his phone screen but I pay no attention. But then it catches me. You wanna know what I see? I see him talking to someone on Snapchat. Why he is using Snapchat in the first place is beyond me, he's 45! But then I see hearts, lots and lots of hearts (my mom is in the kitchen cooking lunch or smth idk but she wasn't on her phone that's for sure). What do I do? I read and only read. I have good vision, so I see all the cheating he's doing.

Unbeknownst to me, this is kind of the beginning of the end. To sum it all up, nothing else happens in my life after that, because I don't do anything. I don't approach my dad because I was scared, and that's what I regret most. 

Now, a little over a year and a half ago, the entire rest of my family finds out, including my mom. I hear her yelling and him begging and crying. It killed me because at that moment I knew how much of a pussy I was, and how I could have probably helped my dad by saying I knew and trying to cut contacts with whoever he was talking to (it was private escorts). Now the only reason he did all that was because he was depressed because my mom (so blind to mental illness it's not even funny) was working a lot and going out with friends and all that and my dad felt unloved and slipped into a very very deep depression. Because he was a guy, he never talked about it, and as I do now, he pushed it all down. Now that he had been caught, it had all exploded in his face as my mom resentfully yelled and scolded him. Do I blame her? No. Do I blame my Dad? No. So who do I blame? Me. All of this because I couldn't muster the goddam courage to talk to my dad because of how much of a pussy I was/am.

Well, I saw the true extent of my extreme lack of courage and mistake when one day, after a fight between my mom and my dad after they had tried to stay together, my dad went out and killed himself. I didn't even know there was a fight until 9 pm when I got the news after coming back from a school meeting to go to NY for an arts field trip. All I remember being told that night is that he left in a car after grabbing something, and never came back. People from my school and others say they heard the gunshot, but I call bullshit, because of all people, I would have.

I'm going to wrap this up because I don't think anyone's going to read this far anyway. But pretty much, I know where my dad came from now. Soon after his death, I met a girl, a stunningly beautiful girl who was my first love. And she was the absolute devil. She was manipulative, abusive (mentally mostly, only hit me like 10 times or so, so not that bad), and she threatened suicide even knowing how suicide has affected me. The only reason she used suicide is that she knew it was a soft spot for me. This lasted 6 months, then I left after I couldn't handle it anymore.

Today, I have shoved these feelings all down. I'm a stereotypical man, large, I don't show that much emotions, hell, I haven't cried properly (like tears down my face and upset) for almost a year now (my relationship ended right around now, and I only cried in our last fight because I was in her house which was an hour and a half away from mine and I had no way of getting home and she was blaming me for how she was going to kill herself. I didn't even cry when we had a break then I broke up with her).

My mom is an absolute teenager. Ever since I got my licence, she has made me drive around her kids as she parties with her friends or goes to sleep with the next guy shes dating. She is constantly spending money on herself while I have to pay for gas or fixing my phone or even getting a $50 pair of shoes cus my 4-year-old ones are so worn they literally don't have a sole now (these r petty problems ik, but I can't work because I've dislocated my shoulder 4 times and now recently got surgery). Now I feel like her slave as all she does is party, see friends, sees her boyfriend and is overall never around the house. Maybe I have more of a problem with the fact that she isn't acting like a mother more than anything, but honestly, idk why I'm so upset with the way she is acting. It's fair to have time with friends and such, but even tonight, she's not home as she is downtown with her boyfriend and she expects me to drive my brother and sister to school tmrw.

I go to uni next year. I've been accepted to one and the rest r pending but everyone says I'm pretty much in. But I'm scared because I know that I have to be friends with my mom even though she isn't really much of one because I won't have any kind of funding to go to school because she will probably just threaten it once I do one thing that she thinks is out of line. I'm now more depressed than ever, and I deny love, as I don't believe in it/want it in my life because it is a rosebush (beautiful, but will just end up hurting you). I've given up on myself, and I haven't told a single soul about how I'm feeling.

There's so much more to this story, but I don't know what to add. I don't even know the reason I typed all this. I guess, if you've read this far, then you know more about me then my mother does. Thanks, I guess. I don't expect this to blow up or anything, but if people what to hear more of a specific thing, then I'm more then willing to share. Thanks again for reading btw, I appreciate that my story was somewhat worth your time.

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mentalhealth,fynnthesynn,2020/03/10,"I need help with someone who I think might have DID So, I'm going to keep this vague because this person is really close to me and may or may not see this at some point or another; but I was wondering if anyone who has any experience in dealing with Dissociative Identity Disorder or as some might call it, ""Multiple Personality Disorder"" would be willing to talk with me. It would be great if you could message me or comment something below because this is a tad bit of a concerning issue I would like to keep private. Thank you sm",10.833737864077673,7.254610601941748,10.835024271844663,63.244381067961186,59.485436893203875,14.571844660194175,44.19660194174757,12.602617957971056,5.413118446601942,424,19,78,11,4,143,71,103,0.075,0.799,0.126,0.7684,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,17,0,0,0,0,28,26,10,0,7,8,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,0,2,8,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,9,3,12,13,3,6,0,0,1,0,12,5,0,13,1,60,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870923531211313,0.16762553475452016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117767528789243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19489646823907733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745240365169273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16323336200636196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763397336808352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648070540082252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3664232917620829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15637224936636648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085124736935928,0.0,0.0,0.176244517686597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714975678772502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668507008316172,0.0,0.2841790905145016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809876931912979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3391691299577161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11853302332889305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791644843671312,0.0,0.0,0.15111791653807696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240942357533618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273864965331083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13544755530966027,0.1230668533143437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284881756822712,0.0,0.14717619329749312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243084705596198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17335968193187773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3406765925559292,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fucknans,2020/03/10,"Anybody know if any ways to treat hypoarousal? I hop all around the window of tolerance regularly, but right now I am at hypoarousal and I was wondering if anybody has any tips or tricks to getting through it",5.359230769230769,7.251840307692309,5.213333333333335,80.84000000000002,69.0,8.276923076923078,36.07692307692308,8.841846274778883,3.2647538461538463,168,9,30,3,3,52,32,39,0.046,0.8640000000000001,0.09,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,6,5,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,6,5,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,1,21,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5670567852802895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3711583138217492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21783001947348454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229135194568164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3560580711622766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33094160653842064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4521455037893653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Few_Fold,2020/03/10,"My experience with mental health I have had suicidal thoughts 3 times and have hid my issues for 2 years also some emotional abuse from when I was younger and about a month ago I had opened up to people who I thought were good and trustable and I felt proud and happy about opening up since they were supportive until I had a big argument with them about some random stuff and they didn't want to be friends with me anymore since I’m a lying and manipulative asshole to them and they have avoided me and don’t care about me anymore and it makes me feel so isolated and alone and it makes me think am I really lying and manipulative? It really does hurt and it’s sad how I lost friends who I thought I could trust over some stupid fucking argument. I can’t even get my mind off of it and I don’t want a lifetime of depression and guilt for the things I’ve done since it hurts every day just repeats and repeats and I don’t know anymore I Just haven’t felt happy at all really 

I been eating a bit less, been feeling sick more and don’t seem to enjoy the things I used to do. I been listening to music that has been helpful to me like Alice in Chains, Mad Season and Nirvana since I can connect to some of the songs. I also have problems with insecurities and anxiety

I always stutter when I speak, I don’t speak loud enough to people to hear me and My whole body shakes when I have to present something also I would also have a weird feeling in my stomach.

and when I’m stressed out I just completely give up on everything and just space out.

Fortunately I have at least some friends who actually care about me and support me through all of this but I still feel so isolated and bad for myself.",4.976148325358853,5.5574364766081885,5.481499202551833,83.4511004784689,68.73684210526315,8.67432216905901,29.872939925571504,8.710501217029153,2.103001169590644,1353,49,279,21,22,435,167,342,0.17300000000000001,0.722,0.105,-0.9585,0,2,1,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,5,2,22,31,3,5,9,0,33,6,2,6,2,72,62,39,1,5,5,0,6,1,3,1,2,6,0,0,14,34,1,1,12,1,0,1,8,17,0,0,18,12,47,14,42,41,13,32,0,5,0,1,17,16,1,7,16,201,61,0,0.0,0.10861337118182586,0.08945621147194982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125948341428853,0.0,0.0,0.09494195906288752,0.0,0.2932322738134672,0.0762763700112754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012691890706077,0.0,0.2727345440248309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654020599188582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007935511502372,0.10182415245554496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869263355812645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961137298410913,0.0,0.0,0.07319063895366065,0.0,0.0,0.05911924582521939,0.0,0.07895480863462112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022059985094576,0.09380972857077582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09380078691564056,0.0,0.10311585253033433,0.0,0.09471910143218792,0.0,0.06054684219527388,0.0,0.07723550997555241,0.0,0.08238663843918648,0.08967036396132036,0.0,0.0,0.1854034203682702,0.0,0.17603419721204094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21247089193354188,0.08474697840802811,0.04789353181367482,0.08793774032146587,0.0,0.07688802991098438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951677811246503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744039506108218,0.10331819225073016,0.0,0.06144413557044375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19626819789355404,0.0,0.0,0.09567914467815104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05037916150036775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04478508877473402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000680913373999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238021019502082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238129815646344,0.0,0.09256006602190664,0.0,0.07316972274002874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710418226752596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771533416237287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617749291731885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345247269225138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.303319840769848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705716619987766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320738353363805,0.0,0.1050071060013068,0.0,0.10493964923226573,0.10027155775180896,0.2080509314101076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12180228904417012,0.05873811608896649,0.0,0.218326037467577,0.0534532244030841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917301801694157,0.0,0.0,0.1081380959233844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023457264256901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511938482558573,0.0,0.0,0.059032154448246575
mentalhealth,AtenorGx,2020/03/10,"Help. I cannot read. Hello Goodnight.  This is my first serious post in the history of reddit, I have noticed that you are a fascinating community and that you provide a lot of support to each other ... well, in my case, a few minutes ago I gave up reading, that is,  I was reading about the industrialization of the twentieth century, and as it was not very interesting, my brain began to divert to situations where they have humiliated me wildly and made fun of me, unfortunately I am like that until now, that is my personality and people do that with me and I don't know how to remedy it, i am trying to man up this summer, elevating my lower self steem and recognizing how valuable I am, but as soon as a i read, I go back to that moments, which had been upsetting me all time, not only when I am reading, besides that I was imagining how to get revenge on them in very extreme and surreal ways ... I barely read 2 pages in 40 minutes, so I gave up and started writing this post, I have been carrying this problem since last year, where many traumatic things have happened to me, but this summer, those thoughts stopped coming to my mind because I can finally relax and be calm and i am getting over of that situations, but when I read those thoughts are activated and I think it will be a big problem when studying.  The question is, does anyone have an idea of ​​how to solve this or, failing that, has this problem happened to some?",11.585434782608695,7.115280876811596,11.505884057971015,61.729695652173916,59.07246376811594,14.373333333333335,46.07826086956522,11.792908689023552,5.2608069565217415,1126,51,210,23,10,382,149,276,0.141,0.782,0.077,-0.9705,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,2,2,2,14,14,0,1,10,0,30,1,1,4,1,40,46,26,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,25,14,0,1,7,8,0,2,4,6,1,1,12,0,34,8,32,31,6,36,0,1,0,0,13,12,0,4,20,167,59,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801904258768571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942938550636743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635173994252635,0.0,0.060529321521164824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084607923595972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553386606744921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689373963517598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108772839024877,0.0,0.08446029182508348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10375509760233773,0.0,0.056431647143785735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17561251347841786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06655535770471616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209198940828126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05456994525826682,0.08093869262870652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04851053034707644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441707371919856,0.0,0.09395534715074902,0.0,0.1006695635677317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002596626361107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11304803643606715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551833580772163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06883866326740104,0.086700579975724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19019435967031134,0.0,0.0,0.28503576722984925,0.0,0.0,0.11123314520739534,0.0,0.6952532224631115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358635950608816,0.0,0.0,0.08213786520859416,0.22322352169243992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028152500806968,0.0,0.0,0.0830150814196612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11267881004627402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596719801919923,0.06362423835746503,0.0,0.15765830630816166,0.05789972366913766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741479951673536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16385757819506178,0.0,0.07881576370893165,0.0,0.0,0.08927814628707925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394273625802313
mentalhealth,Skritts,2020/03/10,"By girlfriend and I suffered a miscarriage I’m 18 years old. I’ve had an extremely difficult battle with mental health throughout my life. I’m going to do my best to keep this short. My mother left when I was 14 years old and it seriously damaged my mental health. I watched a scene from “The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air” around this time that showed Will Smith’s true emotions emerging about his father leaving when he was young. I’ll post a link to the video in the comments. The video changed my life and made me realize that I want to be a parent, it’s my number one goal in life. I want to raise a child without the help of my parents because there’s nothing they can do to teach me anything about being a good parent. Ever since I was 14, I’ve had an extreme passion to become a father, although, I will never rush it. I will wait until I’m ready. I’ve been with my girlfriend for about a year and a half, and I understand young relationships can be unstable and unpredictable, but I sincerely believe she’s the love of my life. 

We’ve recently suffered a miscarriage and I don’t know how to process it. We received the news yesterday. I try to continue my life playing video games and being a kid for now and working but I find myself breaking down in a fit of crying rage because it truly hurts so, so much. This is the most pain I’ve ever experienced in my life and I don’t know how to handle it. Thank you so much for reading this far. I truly have nothing else to say. It just hurts and I feel myself falling into depression again faster than I could ever imagine. Thank you so much for reading my problems, and I understand that there are other people who are worse off, and I’m unbelievably sorry for those people, but I truly don’t know what to do for the next chapter of my life. I’m terrified and extremely depressed about it. I’m sorry for taking time out of your day to read a stranger’s problems",4.524771634615384,5.378428119791671,5.3194791666666665,83.23016826923079,69.88541666666666,7.991025641025642,29.61298076923077,8.139509932561175,1.9812903846153849,1514,57,299,20,26,493,187,384,0.174,0.708,0.11900000000000001,-0.9794,4,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,1,3,1,3,21,23,2,0,24,0,26,12,0,3,5,52,48,27,0,5,5,6,1,0,2,3,10,1,0,2,19,20,0,2,10,9,0,4,5,14,0,2,7,4,43,9,46,33,5,43,0,7,1,2,26,13,0,1,24,200,62,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980361874384884,0.07551209472181207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341687469473136,0.09368237541492587,0.0,0.09556855123919517,0.08901844008904372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08973343716379717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772573536020204,0.0,0.0931761076349786,0.05470500674257718,0.0,0.14611902700806526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086027234782495,0.09541653194655922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301867820706425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04288998962930129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775283703255942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048207913411399794,0.07114705433047983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803296843324068,0.0,0.0,0.05685630463910739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816134989418313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753962184644359,0.0,0.0,0.13985254705603858,0.0,0.0,0.0898172616397516,0.09216244077363316,0.0,0.4194000692601415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655773313872664,0.08026331800028087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709669826803347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18706806036920998,0.0,0.06542214867579729,0.0,0.09021218349338876,0.0,0.0,0.16278345036005587,0.0,0.1780188085829252,0.0,0.0574795093126129,0.0,0.09025961419447501,0.0,0.2825638514478597,0.0,0.0,0.1176137322270884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123875242345002,0.0,0.0,0.16233183897393574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545433952444073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375429971697132,0.09107013722286232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745612025656687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016798718782705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18990893541260756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377772581076112,0.0,0.0,0.1561906388331633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892409690164904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057590500760485726,0.0,0.0,0.17661130740826586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000637809911752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176812225597523,0.0,0.06175349640523242,0.0,0.08644376242511577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16387325457436358
mentalhealth,Newtronicus,2020/03/10,"DAE end up obsessively questioning the point of various things? I get this a lot. What is the point of eating tasty food? What is the point of reading books? What is the point of being friends with people? What's the point of improving yourself? What's it all for? 

Thoughts like these keep cropping up whenever I think about something too much and I hate it, it ends up weakening my enjoyment of said thing as I conclude that it is pointless and I feel empty inside. 

Actually when I think of it all of life just feels empty honestly, there really is nothing more to it than what we have is there?

How do I stop this line of thinking before I lose the plot entirely?",2.7731663685152057,5.238318767441863,3.6474418604651184,86.58633273703043,78.37984496124031,7.380083482409062,25.426952892069174,8.384062270229773,1.8340609421586167,527,20,103,11,13,168,81,129,0.132,0.759,0.10800000000000001,0.3939,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,2,7,7,1,1,7,0,9,3,0,2,2,19,19,5,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,18,4,2,2,8,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,10,4,18,16,6,12,0,1,0,0,4,8,0,2,5,76,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.13950970188126746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12164961997391233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628520036233186,0.0,0.0,0.2532427306250078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445711565342513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728694897610437,0.0,0.1104516213551401,0.0,0.07469142986747078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114478299660235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12707065909694112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097786317895896,0.06984371773499896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993723609539312,0.0,0.12154066811214805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509307677596816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13717531693637613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911143275704794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.675723650923222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014948385551264,0.0,0.14300008524404992,0.0,0.09158473220457948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598902719504732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005866853418066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11952212999815626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899544006324972,0.2748116736603081,0.0,0.11349538095731075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MiSecrets1231,2020/03/10,"Is disgust with sex natural in victims of physical abuse? My parents abuse me and do things like pull me out of the shower to beat the shit out of me. I'm relatively touchy, but I'm almost exclusively comfortable with initiating any sort of touch, and I can't receive unless I prepare myself. Also, I'm 17, which is  about the time I should sort of want it.",6.1523239436619725,5.886081380281695,7.287429577464793,74.43001760563384,66.1830985915493,10.480281690140846,33.24295774647887,10.125756701596842,3.204349295774648,282,11,55,6,4,96,50,71,0.12300000000000001,0.73,0.147,0.1884,2,0,0,0,2,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,3,0,3,0,5,2,1,0,0,13,9,5,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,1,8,2,13,8,0,6,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,3,2,36,11,0,0.0,0.7026195002817156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969067668621143,0.0,0.0,0.2371148131342649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016334585380357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485728760917604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.329233535435956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043579569993753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19698464040425626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17289435642167866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17488623659399455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deadmemescheme,2020/03/10,I don't have anger issues just an analysis I have recently been wanting to fight and rage out. Like i need to fight someone.,3.4716000000000022,5.116423560000001,4.3889999999999985,85.85950000000003,73.4,8.200000000000001,28.5,8.841846274778883,2.2222000000000004,99,4,20,2,2,32,20,25,0.29,0.528,0.18100000000000002,-0.5109,0,0,0,0,2,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,3,1,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5272624303705865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24679876509306864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.374574452777621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4987908338164784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4280258149613534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979602057690192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,llamamomoo,2020/03/10,"Moved back home and now I’m left with no boyfriend or friends Me (25F) and my boyfriend (22M) recently separated because I was having a hard time finding work ever since we moved in together (oct.) and he had a pay cut due to an accident at work. We agreed that although we separated it was to work on ourselves and try to make things work between us at the same time. We also agreed that he would take care of our adopted dog since that’s what we spoke about when we first got him ( that in case of anything he would take care of the dog). 

The same day I left he tells me that his brother got him a flight to go back home for a week. He also said that he would take the dog with him. Long story short he left the dog with me ( even though he knows I can’t have pets at my parents apartment) and went on his way. That same day he broke the lease on our apartment and decided to throw all of our furniture and belongings away since he signed that he would move out that day. 

Long story short he claims he isn’t able to come back because he needs a clearance due to his army work and the corona virus (which I call bs on) and said he wasn’t able to tell me with security when he would come home. Which lead to him telling me he may just not come back at all. 

Because of that we fought over the dog and how I can’t have him or take care of him because we only agreed to a week. He had pretty heated discussions over it because he wasn’t even willing to pay for his things like treats and dental sticks, and told me it was better to take him back to surrender him. The only choice I could see at the time was to find him a foster family or another permanent home, because I didn’t have help, support, and he was being a horrible doggy dad.

I’ve been pretty heartbroken about all of this. The dog has become my best friend and I couldn’t let him go. I begged my parents and they agreed to letting him stay for as long as he behaves and I take care of him. It’s been a week and my ex still doesn’t want to help care for him because “he refuses to help someone who won’t work things out with him” even though since the week he landed home he’s been on tinder while we supposedly were trying to work things out between us. 

He is now saying he might be cleared to come back on the 17th, but he hasn’t confirmed yet. And now he’s saying that he wants a couple of days or weeks of no contact so he can “reflect on himself and become independent” which he told me is what his family is telling him. 

I am heartbroken because I thought he was the one, and now I’ve only been discovering lies upon lies and things he’s kept from me. Now I don’t believe anything he says but if he were to ask to get back together I would do it in a heartbeat. 

Ive spent most of my days crying, and feeling very alone. even though I have some good things to look forward to like grad school (just got accepted!) and having my dog with me, it’s difficult to feel any sense of belonging or love. I feel like I am on my own especially because some friends recently called me to pretty much tell me I’ve been a bad friend and that I should put in more effort if I want to continue to be friends with them. 

Im at a loss on what to do. All I want to do is cry and skip forward to being old so I can be closer to no longer existing. 

Idk why exactly I am posting this but to have someone on my side.  maybe some insight, advice, or comfort that maybe I’m not the only one. 
Thanks",4.6992619047619035,4.392049227777779,5.272103174603174,87.7975,69.22222222222223,8.579365079365079,28.115079365079364,8.037061389416179,1.4634662698412702,2684,79,613,31,42,865,267,720,0.08,0.8029999999999999,0.11699999999999999,0.9633,2,1,0,0,0,0,53.0,14,0,2,13,33,29,2,0,29,0,65,1,0,4,7,111,114,50,0,16,15,5,4,3,5,11,0,6,6,0,34,48,0,3,11,0,3,15,16,6,0,3,31,12,80,23,89,63,15,96,0,2,2,1,107,39,0,14,46,388,114,12,0.09271719493417734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04530108491059463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04801352595442263,0.0,0.07414590729106171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03152543598166473,0.048611031524817584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629835141383373,0.0,0.04333903068107515,0.0,0.04355542835204046,0.2495282993472129,0.038707492485109206,0.2543379365789294,0.10239885738474816,0.0,0.0522302642597712,0.048650487943532834,0.041000412168176514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467462243164296,0.0,0.2363283987812837,0.0,0.0,0.15973530738858932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03701356784406218,0.051294906342717515,0.10184548497112493,0.14948730107595978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247766563466565,0.04193400548877487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740551976490701,0.0,0.07032089939808063,0.033118591293373904,0.0,0.0,0.08474183645622649,0.03943259932320513,0.0,0.0,0.1790826870279978,0.0,0.024220453796004755,0.0,0.052693318549688714,0.03888339208663466,0.11123161599871448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041528197573986896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321957205468387,0.0,0.2325072655424343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05007524043972159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025477472785849525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110625537425207,0.0948096136023436,0.0,0.06794540717763703,0.0,0.0,0.12307769981516035,0.03892954616123248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04184044417453503,0.0,0.03094472378969058,0.0,0.09314688434939583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04917914592417099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478155575500674,0.0340789032268999,0.03437431261419065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04864554968623648,0.0,0.06282757082726358,0.14103120948851627,0.0,0.0,0.10295147263414582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04439872167352378,0.14149007952198234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04660319478496222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154704451175967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819528440640392,0.11059865221105546,0.0,0.046917375604091725,0.03694180011342221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15339324352521433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855897838905856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04941209669225245,0.03702203582105862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05260718703141745,0.0,0.0,0.20913537537966367,0.0,0.20259728762065488,0.042680768073696834,0.0,0.0,0.18479155340969916,0.0,0.13664125990787718,0.036803548083281436,0.08109621296707421,0.0,0.0,0.08859525306770548,0.0,0.06294888924378876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11152736953870557,0.0,0.0,0.03825069797543432,0.10937400758373084,0.03679729685427999,0.1859303529030301,0.0,0.0,0.04297488429890475,0.04183142359547555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23624727758990124,0.0,0.0,0.197590905284878,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jakey_wit_the_eggs,2020/03/10,"I can't afford a therapist, but I know need help Hello, I am 18 yrs and I've been struggling with my mental health for about 6 or 7 years now. I've tried therapy in the past, but I don't think i was ready for it at the time. Now that im older and on my own, I NEED it, like suicidal thoughts and crying for no reason ECT. Any of you have any cheap options?",0.3571607142857154,1.6753005375,2.7321428571428577,95.83,81.125,6.071428571428572,18.92857142857143,6.868970318607317,-0.08614285714285685,273,6,69,3,7,94,59,80,0.22899999999999998,0.691,0.08,-0.9296,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,6,1,0,1,0,14,11,6,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,9,1,9,8,1,9,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,7,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142789018974242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538258883917705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456227432701729,0.0,0.0,0.15488522113663514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24960148983820885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699320280479556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128919515931017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328700316314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34267951847358225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205879740383792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375843823503745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415705719946779,0.0,0.2527593927706655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642552872042356,0.26829678497764303,0.0,0.14806402621058498,0.0,0.183448353962018,0.13474214268416426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688528303547206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488052230046637
mentalhealth,TooManyMistakesToFix,2020/03/10,Advice on panic attacks I’ve been having constant panic attacks. I started a new job and it hasn’t been going well. I don’t have insurance anymore so I’m trying natural ways to help with the constant feeling of dread and helplessness. Does anyone have any advice on what helps?,3.8652830188679235,6.369574773584912,5.019471698113208,77.9552452830189,74.84905660377359,6.504150943396226,29.467924528301893,7.554174236665415,2.280338867924529,225,10,35,3,5,74,41,53,0.284,0.537,0.179,-0.8332,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,2,3,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,11,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,6,1,0,2,1,2,1,5,9,0,8,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,22,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656493600666332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722935350518974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18554554191511485,0.13081946501476555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4256895831737723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4043611735749245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16372595622589142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459961762860117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632901091390233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508083925933299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18566049260739306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18069515607451345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4390256053764275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324250738346854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702356419456115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485053622170834,0.0,0.0,0.16821867642360985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ooz_loozer,2020/03/10,"Worried for therapist Hi y'all! Just in advance, I really appreciate all of the help I can get. So, recently I've been struggling all out with mental health. School has been pretty tough, and my home life is not the best. I've been finding it really hard to cope with the issues in my life. I understand that I am in a much fortunate position than others, and there isn't much rationality to my behavior, but it's still extremely hard to function day to day.I live in a pretty crowded city, and finding access to a therapist with good reviews is really hard. After at least 3 months on a waiting list for a therapist, I finally have an appointment on the 11th. I'm really scared to open up about my problems, I've only been to one therapist before and it was a terrible experience. Any advice on what I should prepare myself for, or what we'll talk about? Thank you.",4.65956862745098,5.837610270588236,6.316176470588236,75.01112745098041,69.82352941176471,10.372549019607844,30.049019607843128,10.504223727775694,3.367960784313726,686,27,128,20,12,236,105,170,0.141,0.7490000000000001,0.11,-0.5179,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,2,0,2,6,8,0,2,11,0,14,3,0,0,2,21,19,7,0,2,4,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,7,9,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,5,3,14,3,28,12,6,18,0,0,0,0,7,11,0,1,6,91,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561492547270474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045747554850008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067637261583548,0.0,0.12416308679810024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15260529152555352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573364851418926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12960704017391544,0.216273431986072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061814103703403386,0.0,0.0,0.09923604450300604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3179579127304325,0.0,0.0,0.125762090560349,0.0,0.0,0.07930328009413848,0.0,0.11867843885241765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348892110102175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671371432403296,0.0,0.0,0.10447329767144208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923253366894475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443698675214428,0.0,0.1739485870833124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017252713881871,0.08998301479158878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407354412717432,0.0,0.11321037636951775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031795291206684,0.0,0.11682065395743026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184528044476454,0.119739933260922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448559390458347,0.0,0.0,0.12368732531617815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950961914463564,0.0,0.10892749764596056,0.0,0.5494859982456066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316889101473605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015345835390336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LnD13313,2020/03/10,"Question I am trying to find an inpatient treatment facility. I am having no luck. They all want over 10,000 dollars. I’m broke, disabled, and without insurance. 
Does anyone know of ANY place? 

I’m literally at the end of my rope and it’s getting harder to hold on. 

Extra info. My therapist is trying to find one too but with out insurance we are not finding anything. This would be for PTSD GAD PDD and AvPD
I am in NC but I will travel to get help.",0.7413333333333334,3.2509759111111163,3.068333333333332,86.4225,89.88888888888891,5.666666666666668,23.055555555555557,7.1686216300943375,1.2158888888888888,352,14,68,6,12,120,71,90,0.04,0.884,0.076,0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,1,21,15,5,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,6,1,1,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,8,1,14,12,2,8,0,1,0,0,4,6,0,2,1,46,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460296088223934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15015021908196485,0.0,0.17671156740283864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18791919225435644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19019465805833724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5888015586425774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22438410656008048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14393475424789948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801471633460076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455124299708739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22435612779716935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510179270253986,0.0,0.24055637249640785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493280606623637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29158682142955805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266583874690818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20700034335560305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254413728221947,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,atoihlp,2020/03/10,"Please tell me whats wrong with me hi, i'm having strange issues lately and not sure whats wrong i'm just confused and bit scared. i cant sleep at night at until like 6am then when i'm trying to go to sleep i get weird headaches while hearing voices. often i also have sleep paralysis. i just get really paranoid at night my heart starts pounding, its difficult to breath and i get shaky. but worst part of all is that during falling asleep i get these weird feeling in my head its like a headache followed by voices don't know what it its. please tell me what is it?",2.043822843822845,4.0825525897435915,2.6778399378399382,94.8083216783217,78.65811965811966,5.28018648018648,20.892773892773896,6.1124844417494595,0.0187846153846154,451,12,97,3,11,140,77,117,0.217,0.69,0.09300000000000001,-0.8758,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,12,0,3,1,0,6,7,7,0,2,15,19,9,0,0,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,11,4,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,9,0,0,0,4,11,3,11,19,4,15,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,3,10,55,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12089994352166294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16505125065172996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644200537593604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159447746197069,0.0,0.08592003887171178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515603069164258,0.0,0.17039275309537796,0.17915103152330605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15779440697101355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308550352731968,0.0,0.1705395322465245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14771947529683774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28374755099632804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637150386008331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319041950030675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685086236240342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15135924636169645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.453872617262227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700717888440196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14248695442819276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26427892274433906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10264244423431483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3305868920063066,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hcooper1127,2020/03/10,"Being gentle I’ve had a wonky life and I’ve been angry for the better part of it. I’ve been sad and lost for the better part of it. I’ve finally gotten good medication and will be going back to therapy regularly. Good things are ahead. I am ready to to be less serious, I am ready to be more gentle and there for those who I love. I’m finally in that place :)",-0.08611832611832781,2.045857155844157,2.9180952380952405,89.37968253968252,87.83116883116884,6.53910533910534,16.347763347763347,7.793537801064563,0.3984759018759023,279,6,63,6,9,99,46,77,0.10300000000000001,0.583,0.314,0.9633,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,4,2,8,0,0,3,0,11,3,0,0,0,4,16,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,5,0,3,5,11,6,4,7,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,44,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16136042477691834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3711876174810881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.459757211098463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926165089147725,0.3520216725875617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482220926116857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290742585420564,0.0,0.18939632513683155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21140013125673085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4544906179209294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21924685744733935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23997987191980125,0.0,0.13941391645735515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LittleList5,2020/03/10,How to deal with mania? What’s the best way? It keeps me awake ruins my sleeping pattern and I’m not willing to go on meds,-1.3083333333333336,0.7220321481481484,1.027685185185188,99.71708333333336,97.88888888888887,2.7,17.86111111111111,3.1291,-0.9697333333333332,96,3,22,0,4,32,26,27,0.095,0.755,0.15,0.3939,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,5,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,3,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4234312931930361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159740200418557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22930910828709636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3586348879437403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4481794773338105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4037751321153016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202666129700562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Technomancer_AO,2020/03/10,"Make it stop make it stop make it stop Everything hurts so much and I ruin everything I touch, someone please just end my misery so I don’t hurt someone else. Please.",0.7100000000000009,3.23567878787879,1.6446060606060615,95.02690909090909,94.45454545454544,5.0642424242424235,18.72121212121212,6.742157984588678,0.2979139393939394,132,4,27,2,5,41,21,33,0.462,0.4370000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.948,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,8,4,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,1,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,13,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583520409562384,0.0,0.16789281920690566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.340726425716162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.405853199116661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3795958821853267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13934751766021816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41615724430913104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212250862521043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4754388956432246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ane_samuel,2020/03/10,"Why can't I remember a day when I was happy? I literally cry every single night. It's not fun. I can't remember of a time I was happy, or when I didn't have to fake being happy. I can't remember a time I wasn't mad that I have to live another day.",-0.20068965517241466,0.9101492758620716,4.192620689655172,85.66444827586207,82.10344827586206,8.088275862068969,20.220689655172414,8.841846274778883,1.2008993103448278,190,5,47,5,5,75,31,58,0.105,0.599,0.29600000000000004,0.888,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,3,0,10,0,0,0,0,5,10,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,4,0,9,4,3,5,1,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,32,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906132393832714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19967790435588026,0.23446742692718875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315834157386926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5805277979357879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051596273461816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17058916425656478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6177673467292183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119959382399012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16402908783115627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aredmnemn,2020/03/10,"What is the best place in the world for someone with Intellectual Disability to live in? My brother in law (let’s call him Dave) is intellectually disabled and currently lives with my in-laws, who take care of him. My father in law (let’s call him Peter) recently turned 60 and is planning to retire and find somewhere where Dave can live and be taken care of. Peter’s goal is to move to that country with Dave and, over the next few years, help him transition into his new home.

Peter wants to find a community of sorts, with professionals taking care of the patients, coordinating activities, etc. Something like you would have in a nice elderly home, but for people with ID.

Peter has accumulated some wealth throughout his life, so price should not be a concern.

What are the top facilities that come to your mind? I appreciate any advice.",6.005196480938416,7.553518200000003,6.577712609970678,73.00111436950148,67.0,9.249266862170089,29.574780058651037,9.573946990214177,2.705387096774193,671,24,120,14,11,219,100,155,0.0,0.825,0.175,0.9740000000000001,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,0,4,2,7,0,0,8,0,14,1,0,0,0,24,23,7,0,3,2,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,2,0,5,12,0,0,2,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,12,7,24,16,4,18,0,0,0,0,14,11,0,2,6,76,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13741942857555745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563142707830616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14757973824063486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871925151646937,0.0,0.4301368973497397,0.0,0.0,0.12113801859272533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683667949927466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570617186153639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425955507169123,0.0,0.2821214161520824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287602006671951,0.09932926317225199,0.06870342470540404,0.0,0.3725296057247328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199354518754234,0.0,0.0,0.14946462829898008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358187805366638,0.14955879268108002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749330474795724,0.0,0.14692566013171415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388525525317491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11915310572594287,0.10826181211464994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114685467712113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15296218545408294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294566042313406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989764170682792,0.0,0.0,0.09055940915363248
mentalhealth,Coolkat5550,2020/03/10,"Wondering If Anyone Had A Depression Day Routine?? Today was one of those days I realized before I even woke up I was going to have another battle with depression. 
It's almost like I can feel it creeping up behind me like a prowling lion hungry for another meal. And of course I do my darn best to battle it down but it's a hard battle. 
If anyone else feels like this from time to time I'm wondering if they have a morning routine like I do. 
I try to just continue business as usual. 
1. Get up without checking phone. 
2. Wash up.
3. Do hair and makeup. 
4. Get dressed. 
5. Get coffee. 
6. If it's nice out sit outside. 
I feel like this helps more than canceling all of my plans and obligations to lay in bed l day. 
What do you do?",-0.3741090909090907,1.889570013333337,2.330424242424243,90.49854545454548,95.53333333333332,5.3939393939393945,20.151515151515152,6.980632752743323,0.7555333333333336,562,20,116,10,22,194,95,150,0.086,0.769,0.145,0.8801,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,1,2,2,12,3,0,4,0,11,3,1,0,1,20,22,9,0,4,7,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,9,5,1,0,6,0,1,1,1,5,0,1,4,5,13,7,22,18,3,17,0,2,0,0,4,7,1,7,13,73,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15370519134915508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32191022436323685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21465750818061635,0.15727593713271526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061474206316556,0.0,0.16108575561997784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969788283812655,0.0,0.2644136861138631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12822714600670354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138339896112884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23283826523104925,0.21931674394527967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405877268312265,0.0,0.08723594966357515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375032680762797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288588280573016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37495469277445215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401361988623976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790108081256676,0.0,0.14549732018678413,0.0,0.0,0.10421446749972373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905538988087804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796574446884347,0.33292215406176523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,okayumyea,2020/03/10,"I realized how big my wall is .. damn it is GIGANTIC, probably made of the strongest materials in the universe!! I was watching this video and this girl said it would take about 3 years of friendship to open up to someone and they were shocked at how long that was.. and I took a moment to reflect on my friendships and I realize the person I consider my BEST friend ever only knows like 45% of what my life is like. And we been close for 5 years. Also have friends I known for 6+ years that know even less about me, probably like 30-35% and it was because they found out about it through time and stuff not because I told them about it. I had this really horrible thing happen to my mom a little over a year ago and I lived in hell for about a month acting like everything was fine in school. I never told or talked about it to a SINGLE PERSON except my brother and another family member. And I had a boyfriend for about 8 months and we were dating up until the new year began. I told him about that horrible thing and he literally tried to make jokes about it and act like it was not a horrible situation .. and that hurt me alot because i held it in for a year straight and it is still traumatic. I broke up with him a week later lol. Anyways idk man I feel like the only person I could trust easily is a therapist which I have yet to have",4.751985294117649,5.0479452279411765,5.5735294117647065,83.60088235294118,69.14705882352942,9.194117647058825,28.132352941176467,9.168548406835145,2.0565235294117654,1050,33,222,19,17,344,147,272,0.109,0.7240000000000001,0.16699999999999998,0.9207,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,2,0,3,1,17,17,2,0,16,1,20,1,0,4,2,43,35,20,0,2,4,2,1,6,2,1,1,1,0,5,22,21,0,1,8,2,0,3,3,5,0,0,19,3,32,12,39,14,4,42,1,2,1,0,22,17,2,2,28,159,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490136861402056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561506588966945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226072534589553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19578656906819009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123518447080153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547792226323317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071147819502697,0.09684101993238453,0.0,0.0,0.09621775102267584,0.0,0.10092572344442026,0.0,0.05413226124317059,0.07648299088510993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738469815082404,0.16542707868596682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467194475699522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460890355740633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767368373821048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561895747974484,0.3138217994732163,0.10730127131819883,0.0945350830009786,0.09474387069322147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10130184072757636,0.0714627324146685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538623949440267,0.17090698924911318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257052225511342,0.10339827622140127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284642988399528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804394409696757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23085547876136625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858475464169862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183765175293312,0.0,0.0,0.10834945178960437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203388328971544,0.0,0.0,0.09071076687485843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549747793218349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255697323650608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049506528033328,0.08604999125930399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243037829039052,0.1422505219689806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624269800833247,0.0,0.0,0.3068984670641933,0.11894651915021626,0.07268605236877541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858762944376372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605166170874895,0.0,0.0,0.4136550231911335
mentalhealth,PantsStealer09,2020/03/10,"Seek therapeutic help if you binge on video games  Only recently have I realized that I have been hiding behind league of legends for 5 and a half years as a way of coping with depression and anxiety. I have lost a large chunk of my adult life to it.

I went to a doctor and he gave me wellbutrin(an antidepressant) to try out, and since then I have played this game only a healthy amount and I have held a job for the longest time of my adult life(I'm 28).

When you have 30+ banned accounts for toxicity/inting/etc... and have played 2-3k games per season, it is actually a sign of severe mental illness(my experience) and I sincerely hope you will seek treatment. I needed help and was in denial but now I am feeling a lot better.",7.756033966033968,6.434742965034968,7.972947052947056,74.28601398601401,63.40559440559441,10.96863136863137,33.71528471528471,9.957137785484203,3.033104695304695,576,19,113,10,7,189,97,143,0.079,0.7829999999999999,0.13699999999999998,0.7783,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,3,0,2,2,7,0,0,9,0,12,2,0,0,0,20,19,13,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,4,10,0,2,2,6,1,1,0,2,0,1,6,1,15,5,17,12,2,12,0,2,0,0,12,3,0,3,7,72,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.2001845206326407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15692955708565784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18142736873937534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668455055375942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099668314462237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287824376608705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006637496623696,0.0,0.0,0.10372363813359124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27499856348629625,0.0,0.0,0.20374773449285552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20356722610146435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897892384888325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22393171547715307,0.1744004901114924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20673026034275446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15210679015217066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120324881452419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20254844431206265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317468831416871,0.0,0.16969178529855486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961727338247105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13927483574703406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16282852761600974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901644341585688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210176627969233
mentalhealth,bonershrinker2,2020/03/10,"I went to my first therapy session today I’m 34 years old and today I finally went to see a therapist for the first time in my life. Even though it was just the intake session I felt a little proud of myself for taking the step. 

I have a long road ahead of me but it’s comforting to know that there’s a place I can go to release all the emotion and pain inside me now. It’s gonna be interesting to see myself go through this journey.",1.7031451612903226,3.276731505376347,3.788911290322584,88.60336693548389,78.03225806451613,6.800537634408602,23.45295698924731,7.645422480735847,1.0060118279569892,342,11,75,5,8,117,62,93,0.05,0.848,0.102,0.5504,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,4,5,4,0,0,8,0,4,2,0,0,1,7,15,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,6,0,1,0,2,4,3,11,3,12,9,1,21,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,11,51,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21094496367331236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386118248557924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18005731623675827,0.2054289304656604,0.0,0.31902426326256444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131541848330744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306107287878673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13245732844016048,0.0,0.18795339437003564,0.0,0.16595732626260587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967802137826791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19954415287368132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19592796522214076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988727795543029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099852279112962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21445583552234032,0.2177357047386861,0.0,0.0,0.1842463597022136,0.0,0.10934970912074783,0.0,0.3555112634116281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476826543915916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076257306779754
mentalhealth,little_odd,2020/03/10,"what causes people / children to wish for abuse / claim abuse that hasn’t happened? details in post i’ve noticed something strange as i’ve grown up (23f) about younger individuals (9-17) that i’m curious of the cause of behavior. those who:

- have never experienced abuse of any kind 
- see domestic and/or sexual violence as inspirational, desirable, etc.
- claim they’ve endured physical / emotional / sexual abuse at the hands of their parents, partner, etc when they haven’t 
- really genuinely want to experience that 
- cut themselves / run away / use drugs etc. in reaction to the pain that would be there from abuse, tho they haven’t actually experienced it 

i’ve seen this in kids that have really healthy homes too, what’s the cause? 

thank you!",6.634883720930233,8.889110666666667,6.454953488372095,71.76010465116279,66.36434108527132,11.051472868217056,33.83023255813953,11.00357731598739,4.3623451162790685,592,27,98,19,10,186,89,129,0.21,0.645,0.145,-0.9358,1,0,2,0,5,0,30.0,0,1,3,0,5,5,1,0,4,0,7,3,1,4,1,10,15,4,0,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,2,0,1,3,11,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,1,5,4,3,18,12,3,11,0,0,2,0,9,6,0,0,2,52,15,0,0.0,0.6759276634565551,0.11134159145228376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758943920550639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719728863245297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.351625181521989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231555759992153,0.0,0.0,0.1283430511506344,0.0,0.0,0.3817428134551894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160813615150188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089503677667133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444795469369815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188138041896968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799814877557016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12989946522403406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214065743647662,0.0,0.12669050844705554,0.0,0.0,0.079100051863615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092727763731362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461861031724894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092002901115737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783695429400433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504460149653247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854262416255742,0.0,0.0,0.06729699088869151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312051863429318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105078251774503,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Theunremembered,2020/03/10,"To all those who are struggling Hi everyone! I have recently reached an all time high of my life. I haven't ever been happier, or more stress free than now, aside from perhaps my childhood. And I know I haven't struggled with very much, like many people do, and alike how perhaps even you do. But I have experienced enough to know what you are feeling, on a very basic level. I know what it feels like to be hopeless, even if what I felt was miniscule compared to the hopelessness of others. I know what it feels like to be excruciatingly saddened, even if not as saddened as others have been. I know the ins and outs of depression, and anxiety. I even live with quite a rare disorder named ""Misophonia"". Misophonia, if you didn't know, is the ""fear is sound"" or more specifically, the onset of extreme emotion, at a specific trigger sound. I personally experience extreme, almost uncontrollable anger, and disgust at the sound of any trigger. I have lived with this since childhood, and by now I have more than 10 triggers. Life, before now, had become extremely difficult. Just making it through the day was a challenge. I was exhausted by the time I got home because all of the overstimulating sounds, and my misophonia's impact on my emotions. I came to love music, as it was like a ""reset"" to the overstimulation. And it was an escape from my parents. Whom I had come to hate. They never understood me. They always see me as this disrespectful beast that takes pride and joy in dishonor and disobedience. Although I was just retaliating their rude comments and attitude towards me. 

I will shorten the story a bit, as I am getting carried away. Anyways, I have been depressed. I have seen the dark skies of meaningless life, and felt the tremors of anxiety. I, at the time, never thought that I would make it out alive. I thought that within the next few years, I would have already ended it all. And I didn't think I'd ever have a purpose in life. 

Whenever I heard people say ""Im happier again, you can make it!"" I would scoff and think ""maybe you but never me."" And I know, that as your eyes scan this very text, you will be thinking the same thing, and scoffing at my very words as well, but: I have been in dark enough places to never imagine that I would see the light again, and I did. I made it out. I found my potential. And I regained my hope. And I know you can too. No matter the challenges you face, no matter the magnitude. I know you too can achieve the same happiness and fulfillment that I have, and continue to grow further beyond. 

So, whenever you are at your lowest, do not give in. Keep the fight going. You CAN and you WILL win. Even if you can't see it now, you will. I mean, after all, we can't ever see the future, can we. I know not what awaits me in the distant future, but I know that the now is what matters. I won't worry about the future, because all I can change is the now. So do everything within your power to create the now in which you wish to live, and if you fail now, do not think that you will fail in the future, because you can not see it. 

Do not give up. YOU, the one reading these words. The one thinking ""yes, you, me, but not ME, some other reader"", you, matter. You have a purpose. You deserve happiness, and love, and anything your heart desires. 

You are amazing. Even if you think you aren't. Even if you've done bad things. You can change that. And they don't define you. You define yourself. 

And never think that you are trapped, or unable to change yourself to be what you want. You can do it. Fight on, until you succeed. 



If anyone wants to talk, dm me. 


Have a wonderful day/night!",3.0429639413849934,5.134019869132293,3.9189460136828593,86.840610083768,75.77098150782363,6.7963512384565,25.52572873625505,7.737674255305718,1.3778236085709763,2820,101,560,41,63,903,279,703,0.11199999999999999,0.774,0.115,0.6296,3,1,0,0,2,2,130.0,2,37,4,10,31,38,6,5,40,1,75,10,3,8,14,135,131,55,0,17,25,1,5,4,0,10,5,6,1,1,42,37,0,1,30,1,1,4,23,20,1,2,27,21,103,19,68,90,17,69,0,6,8,2,59,30,0,15,39,433,145,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06051909136238245,0.0,0.06669391526413251,0.0,0.050288563419636514,0.0,0.0,0.04109934518482546,0.0,0.09246853274113917,0.0,0.0,0.04225907152249055,0.0,0.049734637827278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05678270668658066,0.0,0.050462508934366025,0.11052580584064696,0.06674810125758715,0.051427576640782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598173190405135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912401696678032,0.0,0.0,0.1918035230257256,0.05206126681631034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795394412615983,0.0,0.10410888459218696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926622797341947,0.0,0.0,0.06184820389214884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596735368437335,0.05352939014824466,0.12489549617317773,0.0,0.279427245843236,0.16400662952619208,0.0,0.0577503018464888,0.054317027560006434,0.05911914508076559,0.0,0.06800861399455299,0.09167654080184696,0.08635264656724675,0.11605831385544332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626623275655967,0.0,0.0,0.031575924649355165,0.11595367295223545,0.03434783406749991,0.0,0.048337122485854936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867297351861234,0.0,0.059669188827395775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161833240056781,0.0,0.06385518383947622,0.06062340498679297,0.06002774240802149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528251007352351,0.0,0.0,0.05371932983353367,0.0,0.0,0.3653615429708218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707542300180454,0.11810618553396494,0.0,0.16010137383718848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909380341739076,0.057187107536761914,0.12102683230975075,0.06127380007643201,0.060717256297317675,0.06583379125777063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442827081145604,0.0,0.23306434027532685,0.0,0.06427561141372784,0.05671618592510986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190757526892167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710832030265608,0.0,0.0,0.08379904195646243,0.05277140195774188,0.06314397480774919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428236512681003,0.060453520899644626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05967440997846445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04806205997005423,0.0,0.0,0.2408029813597822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04999424804409849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923056916419344,0.12636409590288658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04544122714161091,0.04857710450609472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030353484767555,0.27107986824193664,0.0,0.09596071740805348,0.10572419210488898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994679649242224,0.07129481245788148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054340270215916704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949975794083081,0.0,0.06554152817277596,0.0,0.06137687550314502,0.0,0.17173131407092912,0.0,0.0,0.038919553228995984
mentalhealth,StarryNight____,2020/03/10,"What disorder is this? I'm afraid of loud noises, I'm afraid to make people angry, I'm afraid to smile, laugh, or have fun,  my surroundings don't feel real, time is going fast, everyday feels like the same.",7.315365853658534,5.84508504878049,7.370853658536586,78.72993902439025,64.36585365853661,11.126829268292685,27.81707317073171,10.125756701596842,2.285526829268293,161,3,33,3,2,52,33,41,0.12300000000000001,0.634,0.243,0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,3,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,6,11,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,3,1,3,3,11,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4690638502379281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4138828061250925,0.2923856694824735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326000385240787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999507687380345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731937992788091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28373929414369026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4658437992166887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386511583059112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tcc07,2020/03/10,"Just got a PTSD Dx, having extreme anxiety. Cross posted in PTSD but really needing some support. 


I recently began seeing a therapist who I absolutely love. 

Long story short, I was told that all symptoms which I previously thought were attributable to multiple other mental health conditions (violent intrusive thoughts daily, occasional auditory hallucinations, compulsive behavior, unstable relationships, severe self harm, and many more) can all be attributed to “severe PTSD” from years of repeated emotional, physical, sexual, psychological, and verbal abuse as well as deaths of those close to me, car accidents, bullying, and among other traumatic events. 

This is the first time I’ve felt validated in my life and am coming to terms with the diagnosis of PTSD as opposed to the other disorders I previously thought. 

I currently take Cymbalta and Adderall with significant improvement since beginning but feel my depression coming back and continue with severe anxiety and panic attacks. 

I’ve been having severe anxiety about this and could really use some guidance or advice from anyone who had longer experience with this. 

TIA",14.109074585635364,13.135345397790058,13.378501381215472,39.44300069060776,50.8232044198895,18.331767955801105,50.24930939226519,16.218646115125612,8.993535359116024,931,50,110,42,8,309,128,181,0.261,0.613,0.126,-0.9862,1,0,0,0,1,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,4,8,2,1,5,0,11,5,0,3,2,34,28,14,1,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,11,15,0,1,5,0,0,4,0,5,1,1,11,3,9,3,21,15,6,23,0,1,1,1,6,5,0,3,13,77,20,0,0.0,0.12477257587210012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290560702791364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24168063880532506,0.0,0.0,0.0736336935251747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198028760503607,0.0,0.08097523228872912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18142676718509296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407974499461247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070149230833223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206919134398214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845715120948465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301127908195172,0.0,0.0,0.05324681041370191,0.0,0.10111204536204868,0.0,0.0,0.089574798882883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422430344022164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193731447128354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438204501596993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319412869157973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950444413107444,0.0,0.0,0.10676562577929813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612553876165093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808443247466866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12355606588187547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008558054204309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4923969401023133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492580371885055,0.0,0.10397879218220253,0.11306121481882404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391671795229998,0.0,0.10985904878216653,0.4758715591799308,0.0,0.08711173733529667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950209418125694,0.0,0.10945517226950964,0.07917839347162331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227052426754548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508079970114807,0.061405851092468475,0.0,0.0,0.10062615845422797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095216629455813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468439932534924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781479931653069
mentalhealth,CT-6798,2020/03/10,"I’ve been having a really hard time dealing with my depression and breakup I’ve been cutting myself on my left arm a lot, but I can’t keep doing that even though I can’t stop. However, now I’ve been thinking of shaving my head. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just want to feel free of these dark thoughts that haunt me. According to my genetics my body doesn’t produce any serotonin so that sucks too knowing I’m fighting something I can’t do anything about.",3.678392857142857,4.82621279166667,4.38565476190476,88.04625000000004,72.125,7.569047619047621,30.380952380952376,7.957251820313856,1.9306327380952388,372,16,78,5,7,119,66,96,0.23,0.7090000000000001,0.061,-0.9378,1,0,1,0,2,1,7.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,3,0,2,0,11,3,3,1,0,15,20,4,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,2,5,0,1,0,5,5,0,0,4,2,13,2,8,16,1,5,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,1,3,48,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688583483883426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204336803018148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27581485378729903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25599524145927266,0.2138678149947745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640054743854902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12555227823493378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22243571375084614,0.0,0.2548362387855069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207080738495137,0.0,0.0,0.2729278020598731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697879973120036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21110307402238812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15907283382763887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19116007515228065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075970903256239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910611097787195,0.2439619178533139,0.1971292751601682,0.14479072909183316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464588331779479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714864506881703,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mojavecourrier,2020/03/10,"Stopped taking meds for schizophrenia, what do you guys think.  So  


I was taking risperidon since last year and i've stopped taking it since january,  psychiatrist   said i may be schizophrenic, but idk.  


Before i started taking the medication i was kinda angry all the time, was kinda racist etc   
And  Last year i began feeling odd, like i had impulses to kill myself, to  throw myself under cars/trucks that were passing by, at home i had  impulses to take a knife and stab my mother (this one happened multiple  times) and one time it was so bad i was almost detailing how it was  going to happen, it was almost like a trance, i had to snap out of it  and say, no, ""i'm not going to do that"" I still got one problem that i  have to keep taking a few steps back when i'm walking, like, i'm walking  from point A to point B, if i think something bad is going happen, i  have to walk back to point A to ""undo"" the ""curse"", it gets tiresome but  its manageable.  


Since i stopped talking the risperidon, my  Psychologist says i'm more talkative, and the thoughts come easier, but  i'm getting angry again.

​

So What do you guys think about the subject?",6.744864864864862,6.225230828828829,6.933108108108107,78.30614864864866,65.03603603603604,9.562162162162162,32.46396396396396,8.841846274778883,2.5564882882882882,892,31,171,12,12,288,118,222,0.218,0.721,0.062,-0.9914,0,0,1,0,0,1,37.0,0,2,0,0,10,7,1,0,11,0,19,2,0,1,1,31,49,15,1,3,5,1,1,3,0,1,2,3,1,2,13,8,0,4,5,0,0,10,2,4,0,3,15,4,20,3,19,32,4,33,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,6,20,110,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19764258941158588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069278853995712,0.1199161372415317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15176922069600246,0.16479991205209601,0.0,0.0,0.0839758098282096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850105590648278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006267034076472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04989937473856525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031203108023332,0.0,0.16825917358368914,0.0,0.07892942406887843,0.0,0.0,0.19543231850327664,0.26180714088979884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899162785501317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771800113603592,0.10918311779105427,0.0,0.0,0.16088699895586964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14464121037452993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961958588948642,0.09941729274765801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20061965039642612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798748117019393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443062746076038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387442960285024,0.15696055196957098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449060061052713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597447341598197,0.0,0.0,0.06985153375568512,0.0,0.07881198000163861,0.24752155397953898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4452043939918033,0.07932128940281415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897049316785288,0.0,0.07834686643242468,0.17263645752657916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199161372415317,0.12710305303265212
mentalhealth,Xbass540,2020/03/10,"I want to help a close person next to me with mental issues. 

I have strong suspicions about a close friend being schizophrenic or similar:
So he is out of his minds that’s for sure, recently I suspect he is mentally ill. He says that he is losing reality all the time. He can’t actually “see”, is how he describes it. He is writing a book on psychoanalysis to self analyse himself. He says he is the only man on the planet that would ever manage to do this. He exposes lots of narcissistic behaviour. He is delusional that he will become a millionaire when the book is published. He spends all his time with this or at least what he says. I have read some of it. Is basically very simplistic opinions framed into some vague scientific context starting from Algebra and going into random knowledge he has found here and there around the web. He still manages to have some social life, but everybody is abandoning him or he does. He smokes enough weed and is absolutely miserable all the time. He doesn’t accept help from anybody and if you try to speak to him he gets aggressive. What should I do to help him? I really care about him.",4.258501291989663,6.3354511627907035,5.423682170542637,77.45185400516797,72.25581395348838,9.242894056847543,27.758397932816536,9.725611199111238,2.838855297157622,900,34,164,24,18,298,127,215,0.086,0.8079999999999999,0.106,0.765,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,2,10,9,1,1,10,0,23,3,0,1,5,39,30,12,0,4,5,0,0,0,1,3,3,4,0,3,10,12,0,1,4,3,1,1,2,4,0,0,1,5,15,5,25,25,9,19,0,3,1,0,41,9,0,10,9,108,25,6,0.0,0.0,0.15034161260842058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371472266594476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014861026382047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570757707478038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348200884830422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15918651393593725,0.0,0.0,0.13935727290201566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16892027186564895,0.11902738408744395,0.0,0.08049067457588839,0.0,0.08755659145424924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30979214103721026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16079997875181734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881805769320176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17235519584995787,0.0,0.13097741443843425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105151249124166,0.0,0.15555800273565967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384594842179162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717056669946255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452039137611588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410299877946199,0.0,0.09869561861486313,0.0,0.1521169551620025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675472061188368,0.0,0.0,0.12276691577378572,0.0,0.16071954335123995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570461017019393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904538646965213,0.0,0.12303355925978815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14520095917387882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695031621722315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104597515011697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271167133767386,0.09086935081430028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944073268536196,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loubrando21,2020/03/10,"I was talking to myself today on the street This is the first time it happens and I'm not sure what it means. I thought I was genuinely having a conversation with someone and I even had hand gestures and everything. I always have conversations with myself but I am aware. This time I was not. Luckily, I snapped out of it but people noticed and looked at me as though I was crazy. It made me sad because I know I don't talk to people throughout the day and it made realize how lonely I am. I could've texted someone but I have no one to text. 

​

Help?",0.987218710493046,3.480544415929206,2.595025284450063,90.83365044247788,87.14159292035399,5.352465233881164,23.115676359039192,6.868970318607317,0.8487906447534761,441,17,90,6,14,144,71,113,0.165,0.784,0.051,-0.9133,0,2,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,12,1,1,3,1,21,20,11,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,8,2,18,1,10,12,0,9,0,2,1,0,5,4,0,0,5,68,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15426297465464392,0.20087473178925536,0.22527446246208865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301469244477813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802232565861145,0.0,0.0,0.11956403692243553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12245123858945535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16662051321460142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15769636375438964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16394363674866375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242659440502835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188790201348882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556845852822677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508492874175511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20194882855315405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21107272885655728,0.0,0.0,0.12562802900429654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570582376263601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31416811077234524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17473200780695192,0.0,0.0,0.2980259578579882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18214903570584828,0.1471824278796131,0.21620990616315466,0.0,0.17573219334606446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22527446246208865,0.0
mentalhealth,Mighty_Melon,2020/03/10,"Depression: A Short Film Hey all. I've struggled with depression for quite some time. I've had great difficulty in explaining how it feels, how it affects me, etc. for as long as I've been affected by it. Recently, I discovered the beauty of short films, and decided to try and represent a small part of how depression has affected me through making my own film. This project has helped to bring me out of a fairly bad episode, and I hope to spread awareness through it.

If you are having a good day and in the mindset to watch such a video, you are greatly welcomed to take a watch. If not, no worries, and if I can help with anything, please shoot me a message. Thank you so much, and have a lovely day.

Heres the link: [https://youtu.be/zHM0eOk9wSw](https://youtu.be/zHM0eOk9wSw)",5.084624413145541,7.412858753521128,4.3982394366197175,84.60585680751177,70.61971830985915,8.11361502347418,29.438967136150232,8.841846274778883,2.350927699530516,621,25,116,12,12,185,89,142,0.152,0.655,0.19399999999999998,0.7853,0,0,0,1,0,1,35.0,0,3,0,1,6,12,0,1,11,0,9,1,0,7,1,27,17,15,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,0,4,4,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,3,11,7,20,15,6,12,0,3,2,1,10,6,0,5,5,79,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478741723052358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003832473918605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23177759945930584,0.0,0.4643146852347413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20040810057021646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085949741211613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072014833045386,0.0,0.3962300789880181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408923531513394,0.0,0.0,0.17847828217358708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15902495621593252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16218229978874749,0.0,0.11994821206018795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13209694611656725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19459282959574956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972518133102577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19112839566585496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17742773183579635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18785686301399052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351087319754128,0.0,0.0,0.16543957071935714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478195266676883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200152063536578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18248961006269002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoachesInMyBlister,2020/03/10,"I'm constantly thinking about hurting people. Frequently I find myself imagining how I hurt and torture people. This includes close family members too. Whenever something goes wrong ,I blame someone even if it was my fault and am aware of it, and I imagine in details how I torture this person. This can last for minutes, even hours. And this happens a lot during a day. It can be simply because someone bumped into me and made me drop my things or someone accidentally bump into my desk while im writing or because a teacher wouldn't let me go to the bathroom. I am a 15 year old and I've tried speaking to my mom about this but she told me im just seeking attention. I've never acted violently towards someone before though, because the image of doing something to them is enough for me. But i'm scared that one day it won't be enough. 
Anyone know if its normal/common and why it happens?",4.581129390840374,6.141042364161852,5.560693641618496,78.89763450422413,70.44508670520231,7.172787905735884,32.382836816362826,7.61054688173877,2.3939767896843054,711,33,123,8,13,234,108,173,0.128,0.848,0.024,-0.9108,0,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,9,8,3,1,6,0,12,0,0,3,1,30,21,17,0,3,7,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,13,10,0,0,6,0,0,2,3,8,0,1,3,1,18,0,13,13,3,18,0,2,0,0,7,5,0,5,10,88,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021109471510598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23594115014684056,0.0,0.10978324464229818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139420628743443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16640949229654609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266616350734832,0.0,0.17042790599295046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162494793289345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791842751405306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332285354809337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281771179597503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705492345400915,0.0,0.27622892265898724,0.0,0.2787191714019659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090390422424496,0.10516538514049592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13192775866945336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968492054644924,0.0,0.12207820448057342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110216037645002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995052116282373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640843828550405,0.0,0.0,0.1353807508649116,0.0,0.08742468497606372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17888711319524145,0.11265192936681485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291676772946896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43725987475069,0.1986458771557965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571260000643914,0.08266834209724312,0.12675771634316535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328046409933345,0.0,0.08759349978470354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164170118876459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410589112028346,0.0,0.08308217327354203
mentalhealth,naughtyscarfie,2020/03/10,"Hi guys, been dealing with regret and family problems for 20 years, and I've been trying to move on, but I'm conflicted because I believe I need to wear it and own it, sort of like punishing myself indefinitely and to move on is almost an insult. I'm curious to see how other's found acceptance with there regrets",5.387903225806454,6.094252145161293,7.013064516129031,72.38959677419358,67.87096774193549,10.070967741935485,31.62903225806452,10.125756701596842,3.307729032258065,251,10,45,6,4,87,46,62,0.221,0.647,0.132,-0.7658,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,7,2,0,1,0,3,1,1,1,0,18,8,6,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,3,1,3,2,10,5,1,5,0,2,1,0,4,2,0,3,2,28,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628681728130232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600250762526434,0.0,0.0,0.2957614943315628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706386793247373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474732562133229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878312137836697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599284730407282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825026157170266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5580181121175966,0.0,0.19464956207820366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511888411510788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20918833476511906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822863633867206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16904932995019473
mentalhealth,xanthe13666,2020/03/10,"How to deal with anxiety? Anyone have any tips? I chew gum like 24/7 or else i get so anxious i want to throw up i literally cant be without a chewing gum anywhere, but sometimes it doesnt help so i need some other tips, i also bite my nails so much its hard to say i even have nails",0.4495698924731215,2.199898258064522,2.7141935483870974,94.0079569892473,82.54838709677419,5.423655913978496,21.623655913978496,6.42735559955562,0.1987010752688172,220,7,52,2,6,75,47,62,0.146,0.8009999999999999,0.053,-0.6555,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,1,0,8,8,7,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,8,1,6,7,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,1,33,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23694829599847825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20149185867107366,0.0,0.22666609950610936,0.3347308375168104,0.0,0.20717748247542114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054687997655444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247517801914706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19570111979399749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480275216660636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654235684895462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19860137539672795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475555958842667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178121043798841,0.21970018569139124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356269607551404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930449285593997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747634203311841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856193635292057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,koorieangel_,2020/03/10,"I just moved I just moved 3 weeks ago from a rural town to the city. It all went smoothly but obviously my anxiety was telling me otherwise. 
I’m all alone here, meaning I have no close friends or family. I was just thinking if I had one of my breakdowns or attacks here, I honestly wouldn’t know what to do! At home I usually stayed at a friends house or a family members. Idk it’s just a scary thought to actually have no one to turn to .",1.3786324786324755,3.435496802197804,3.3950915750915764,88.730463980464,80.97802197802199,7.560927960927963,27.69352869352869,8.515128840125781,2.0661272283272285,343,16,76,8,9,116,60,91,0.205,0.67,0.125,-0.7088,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,5,0,7,0,0,0,3,18,14,5,0,2,9,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,3,3,1,0,2,5,1,10,3,9,8,2,11,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,4,3,51,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.18557022360718173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856672397893718,0.0,0.0,0.19694999691025836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14547305109770398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216336194684148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3585347358987763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938366550319648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907475209117693,0.0,0.0,0.21942087576782188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450780455527146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20714165555990105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.404223227018834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577167503185383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026868907754544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16620956023430425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184783099507812,0.0,0.15096701475683125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20684114000678472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20943606112153573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525361101975139,0.0,0.0,0.17628164484154846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aaliyahrenee16,2020/03/10,"I think I might be alexisthymic and have some other sort of dissociation-ish issue? I don’t know what I’m looking for by posting this but maybe I can figure out what is happening in my brain that makes me so disconnected and flawed? I’m a pretty quiet person when it comes to conversation because I feel as though I don’t have an opinion on pretty much anything. Everyone in my life is relatively happy and very loving and supportive of every “accomplishment” I’ve achieved. They all wish the best for me, but I cannot explain how it emotionally affects me or if it does at all because I don’t feel like I am. This, to me, connects to me not having an opinion on nearly anything and not really believing in much. My mind is most of the time “blank”, but when people are interacting with me I can understand what they’re saying. I would be doing this, but I wouldn’t be thinking about what I would say next or how I may feel in that situation. I can pick up what makes the person feel one way or another when it’s brought to my direct attention, but it doesn’t get processed any further I feel like? Each time I discuss what I think is going on with me, people tell me to do a range of things in order to ‘feel better’ but I don’t know what that means. Tell me to do a thing that makes me happy I couldn’t really tell you, ask me a thing that makes me furious nothing would even come to mind. But my memory is also poor and there’s something definitely wrong with my ability to like... connect things? I’m really not sure.",5.508201230546508,5.447567856677527,6.551568946796963,78.4688879840753,67.50162866449512,9.688671733622876,29.759138617444812,9.444778638647367,2.422682374230908,1200,39,243,22,18,403,149,307,0.051,0.789,0.16,0.9897,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,1,4,11,12,1,0,9,0,32,3,1,8,3,69,64,26,0,7,14,0,6,3,0,6,1,4,0,2,25,13,0,0,16,0,1,4,11,2,0,1,1,11,40,10,33,53,8,26,0,0,1,1,15,13,0,11,9,178,65,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582007136406285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447451769738237,0.09941727099849483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560422324174484,0.0,0.08863519293625396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559142840587655,0.0,0.0,0.10681917608733893,0.0994979656340333,0.08385234708489116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584008138597242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16334202180601484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296947026282338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664926061432824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626215639419631,0.0,0.07988209213166393,0.09059567352438896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876347895949368,0.1354655460878579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04953467028393743,0.0,0.05388309778398676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838407765392623,0.2018554765530339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895772362580556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421094705692256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696759142811219,0.13895913636462512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961709758378115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557034579843248,0.0,0.25314747656836795,0.0,0.09525007753951477,0.1032766317917416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057915506939404,0.19146353080377804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13939352657885826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083224019672578,0.0,0.0,0.09097341030416273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424617457379321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314595838290986,0.16557006804557708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080242912249173,0.19291310549889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18221445971162148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15079452590675493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065711835097848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729898981369495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759004294942406,0.08935794954492918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486061556211944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25195202772283803,0.182252577961008,0.09315101764436497,0.0,0.11056974694290883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870126783569713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822874535307656,0.0,0.07525630949646347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902760988450808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020523733127915,0.10366060154300533,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,biochemxo,2020/03/10,"Nightmares Idk why this affected me so much but I’ve had two murder dreams in the past month. The first dream wasn’t so bad but I literally just woke up from a nightmare and I remember some creepy details. I work for Lowe’s so the dream was about me and my co- worker delivering at night to a woman and her son. Everything was ok until he asked to take my phone inside, I replied “no, I’m good”. So he hit my back and it felt so real, I completely didn’t know I was dreaming. So I got in the front seat and my co- worker got in and I drove away. Somehow I crashed into the same house the guy and his mother lived at but that was impossible because I drove away, not towards his house. So me and my co-worker panicked because we wrecked so I waved down a passing car and the guy let us in. Somehow his pickup truck turned into a Lowes delivery truck and we took off. At this point I’m feeling better but I knew it wasn’t over. I heard a noise on the top of the truck and the guy dropped down so I did what I had to do. I threw him down and hit his head with a metal pole and then the car stopped and some guys had a gun so I took the gun and shot the guy in the head twice. After I killed him I asked “what should I do with the body” and my co-worker replied “take him and throw him inside the truck”. I’ve never had a dream feel so real to the point I was actually scared when I woke up. I think it might have something to do with the stress my job causes and the fact that I’m afraid that one day my”murder gene” will activate 😔",0.5560079453067246,2.4651813506097566,2.2089246119733943,96.92883222468588,83.0548780487805,5.317220990391721,19.085735402808574,6.42735559955562,-0.2092613821138212,1185,30,284,11,33,387,159,328,0.13,0.7929999999999999,0.077,-0.9678,3,0,1,2,0,0,22.0,3,0,0,6,17,11,2,3,27,1,21,3,3,2,2,52,47,36,2,1,6,2,3,0,0,3,0,1,0,6,10,25,0,1,7,5,0,10,6,8,0,4,25,4,45,3,35,16,4,49,0,2,0,0,26,26,0,5,12,188,55,4,0.0,0.0,0.09957894524122007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907922801017861,0.0,0.1917449318894094,0.07846452960400227,0.08520138351273257,0.12440855294149725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024846656405826,0.0,0.11334642429814665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482595119967042,0.0,0.0,0.10698981863072232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06580909302846688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170938968633176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319169983057007,0.0,0.09797698447276916,0.0,0.0,0.08679745966837821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558856667669165,0.16322572134397173,0.0,0.0,0.5051915292987684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20945047774838865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354871266320863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10126162400970144,0.0,0.11289511719024195,0.0,0.05607999357223794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434556374757216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010556444957067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082511680219502,0.0,0.0,0.08144950131639826,0.0,0.07501311805835531,0.0,0.07870161297278191,0.0,0.0,0.09576015165377233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06914676737696653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741129362018228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19292664961967307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322938415671792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155944753141258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021625338079785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855744782978673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531225769753081,0.11688955620171658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153446806460505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538483520990243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22674636562663106,0.0,0.110993144018446,0.09968088038307038,0.0,0.12274479143655505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207765566350733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22286488011354447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CJWASHERE98,2020/03/10,"What's wrong with me? Today I got into an argument with my girlfriend because she found out that I had messaged one of her old friends who's half African American and said some racist jokes. I sent her a racist meme along with some White supremacist propaganda. It was just a meant to be a joke, basically like satire but I said it to a poc. I didn't completely think it through before I said it. I usually use Reddit as a way to be edgey and say things that I can't say on Facebook. I've made jokes about killing cats and hating black people but I'm never serious about it it's all just meant to be for fun. I only do this when I get upset or depressed it's like a coping mechanism. My question is why is that what I decide to do? I don't understand myself or why I think it's ok to say things like this because it's not who I really am. I just feel lost and making jokes like that help me get in a better mood. Why????",2.078673076923078,3.5118939025641036,3.746714743589745,89.90776442307694,76.64102564102566,7.131410256410258,22.95673076923077,7.865858978985527,0.9176730769230774,721,21,163,11,16,241,111,195,0.152,0.657,0.191,0.6361,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,6,20,2,1,8,1,13,0,0,3,2,34,33,10,1,0,8,0,1,4,2,0,0,6,0,0,21,10,0,0,9,4,0,1,5,7,0,2,13,9,23,12,20,17,3,11,0,2,2,0,17,4,0,5,9,104,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16772610507231495,0.0,0.11706425107231555,0.0,0.0,0.12167189013649796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14424237833361045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849118119921175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956090027231482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508413854149758,0.10628834135639116,0.0,0.14375213503882586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11002947080944453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582457814340154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221209356859736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522038303661178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688443255476586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501768739354506,0.0,0.0,0.13017463299007995,0.09183085813380884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610456190291752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443594262607764,0.0,0.0932228347349543,0.10463025198575306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537560126284084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541129301610965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813260647659114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925894785217139,0.3282100434959303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827944029147197,0.17630208665330546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304028515591128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14321805213490388,0.0,0.11881865824471448,0.15151691373836385,0.0,0.0,0.10919882077793217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37241394221245255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504141715872902,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SoundlessCommotion,2020/03/11,"Does anyone have any idea what might me wrong with me...? Today when at music lessons I started to freak out because I couldn’t see. I could see everything but at the same time I couldn’t see at all. It’s like everything was blurry and nothing held the right color and it made me want to cry. I kept trying to look at the notes because when I got closer they went black but this only freaked me out more because it meant I legit couldn’t see... On top of this the sound of violin was too like much and I couldn’t process idmedjwjs if that makes sense and so I started to twitch. 

Because of this I started twitching and I have ADHD so I was already spacing out a lot and I have fucking social anxiety so then I start sweating so much because he looked at me funny because I wasn’t paying attention and was spazzijf out and then I dropped the bow because of the sweat and had to turn around and stare at a wall until I was able to regain composure.",3.25763385146805,4.6878972849740945,4.040435233160622,89.01160276338516,73.55958549222798,6.597443868739205,26.856303972366142,7.0316486544052195,1.1833532987910198,748,27,154,7,15,239,103,193,0.081,0.8440000000000001,0.075,-0.0045,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,2,8,6,1,0,8,0,16,5,2,2,1,37,36,22,0,7,3,0,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,8,16,0,2,4,0,1,1,5,4,0,0,13,10,23,2,24,17,6,30,0,0,9,1,3,17,1,3,13,107,31,1,0.12068023215948433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450341873323937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317363709206595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206669616994312,0.0,0.09232004728568444,0.0,0.0,0.08438242428107083,0.0,0.0,0.10743099231694056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5149588458770246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635334553948413,0.0,0.13256156832005306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560808441249807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21691922231730829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115669300160895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651900600695253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623329285971333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791653127828287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20268200184167195,0.0,0.0,0.1025980178160523,0.0,0.1141905535952454,0.08055499206381618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12802265538226232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774277125654015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157959375208852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178275461682044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306025887861367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3846660820351198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230182990665986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34167235784091643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036961385691454,0.0,0.11439074931802162,0.0,0.0,0.08193395597780112,0.13126543838848947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118032764466392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187178425535096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319448891661696,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lolololololol112,2020/03/11,"Are antidepressants worth it? I’m 18 male and I’ve been struggling with depression for a long time. Recently I decided to try and get help for the first time but all chances at CBT or other more appealing therapies were put to rest as I don’t have loads of money and there’s no free help available. 

But I can get antidepressants through the NHS but this is a last resort but I’ve recently dipped again and I can’t take it anymore and I’m considering them. 

Can anyone offer any alternatives or insight into this?
Sorry if this is the wrong place but and thanks in advance",2.089605173587476,4.731026265486727,3.35929203539823,86.46009530292717,82.80530973451329,7.016746085772635,23.73655547991831,8.139509932561175,1.608619332879509,460,17,91,10,13,149,78,113,0.107,0.745,0.14800000000000002,0.7138,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,1,2,2,5,0,1,5,0,10,0,0,0,1,19,16,15,0,1,8,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,2,0,3,2,3,3,0,1,2,0,5,3,11,14,3,14,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,3,8,58,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14557465438399267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21229950001814388,0.14968242690509706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18437781459358007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820874744215012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236850391174617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28697265263467225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17449527825763916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894448409150136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22365714752223165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21519905316952626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4227357671572371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396333674001075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223792003313964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095368201552065,0.0,0.0,0.19708650706005773,0.24480721977611444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24965138587136704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533919215027585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340514792788041,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,haveyouseenmypepsi,2020/03/11,Imposter syndrom I've recently been diagnosed with anxiety and my GP suggested Imposter syndrome as a possible cause. Does anyone have any resources to help deal with this?,6.628505747126436,10.132190931034485,6.490344827586206,65.74747126436785,70.72413793103449,10.763218390804601,44.14942528735632,10.504223727775694,6.520232183908046,143,10,18,5,3,45,27,29,0.057999999999999996,0.85,0.092,0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,4,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,10,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382663036569456,0.0,0.2680351159091837,0.0,0.0,0.2449896153419963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3599305658597977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3612201618601113,0.0,0.3556221881486134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30661460840521193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23484827590087198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3949939886503115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34595201029449824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flying-monkey45,2020/03/11,"find myself thinking about death a lot is there something wrong with me? i’ve noticed that a lot of times throughout the day i almost “daydream” about what would happen if i died. i often times think about how my boyfriend would react when he hears the news or my mom, my teachers, my friends, etc. i never really think about how i died, but more so just how the people close to me would react to my death. it sounds super morbid and i don’t know exactly why i do this, but i am certain that i would never want to harm myself or anything of that matter. is this a sign of a mental health illness or should i be worried?",5.735691428571428,5.309091392000003,5.8174857142857155,85.15960000000003,67.08,7.782857142857144,28.25714285714286,6.1826913282559595,1.1793542857142856,484,13,99,2,7,153,77,125,0.16899999999999998,0.7190000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.7592,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,12,5,0,0,7,0,11,2,0,5,4,37,18,12,4,7,7,1,0,0,1,5,2,2,0,0,7,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,19,3,11,12,4,7,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,8,6,76,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15928618105178846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090151136051464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258734705242667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301802398510552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774057149032136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538760355933925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289751459147055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14066556460520646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16908455927549385,0.1792840740321752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742101582838148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27047219134506023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603057035461709,0.0,0.0,0.18630150904236667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453700335949649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18110287880759285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11027949254159143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019046694324006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246028311894792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057779619638189,0.0,0.0,0.1855106372338464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382393348587403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435364321650814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16154386795476447,0.0,0.4519966273381058,0.17391867830009575,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BabyBlueMinotaur,2020/03/11,"is something wrong with me? Hello, My name is Magnus i recently turned 19 this year and i am a high functioning autistic male and lately i've been thinking there might be something very wrong with me.

  I am an artist, i enjoy making my own characters and stories and i am not sure if it's my autism or not that makes me think like this, but i often overstep a boundary and don't know what is real life or not. I haven't talked to another human being in so long that anytime i try and talk to someone even online i feel like i have to run away or distract them someone so i can disappear. I have a partner right now too , they're very nice and it's going alright but they live all the way across the world and the time difference is like 6 hours ahead. anyways,, yeah reality is hard for me and i don't know if i'm a stable human being or not anymore. would love some advice please.",3.0042307692307686,4.311914807692311,4.197582417582422,88.1224175824176,74.0,6.7384615384615385,25.08791208791209,7.1686216300943375,1.0054131868131877,693,22,145,7,14,227,113,182,0.095,0.7659999999999999,0.14,0.8496,0,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,1,8,11,0,1,8,2,20,2,0,2,2,38,31,19,0,3,12,0,2,3,1,2,1,0,0,4,7,11,0,0,5,1,0,3,7,3,0,0,1,2,22,8,10,25,3,18,0,0,0,1,11,6,0,9,11,99,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449654729057119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15555744828931406,0.0,0.0,0.1471229006082197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937929480332878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499371539932516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979834851315259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750099948416735,0.10598095516454424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431047355270369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328920667599046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673945488735308,0.0,0.0,0.14609443366226674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16305807678258544,0.0,0.167344765109213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478368130620072,0.21742830448137307,0.0,0.13099537919552925,0.1312846921368045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338912696752651,0.0,0.19804896624274887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157375439463904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284326812642202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885427690711174,0.0,0.0,0.14647729328071513,0.0,0.0,0.12668971350310487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513922012162686,0.2284134776794009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981770446892378,0.0,0.0,0.23847551357558575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19011281565750554,0.0,0.0,0.08650382131639127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071961318503593,0.16136172141663552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448078465196125,0.0,0.11775297546759225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10538327092688488,0.3243939106799537,0.0,0.09553225268143227
mentalhealth,SavingsOven6,2020/03/11,Mental health and cocaine. Cocaine a coping mechanism for anxiety/paranoia/OCD/Depression?,9.355384615384617,14.021820307692312,8.72961538461539,44.052884615384635,76.69230769230771,11.830769230769231,52.653846153846146,10.125756701596842,9.405646153846154,76,6,5,3,2,24,12,13,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5068835020649514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6255594756706959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5930804816658313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,killerqveenrequiem,2020/03/11,"Advice for someone who feels empty and is losing motivation to live? Hello, I’ve never been on this forum so please excuse me if I say anything incorrect or unnerving. I just turned 19 about a month ago and I’m currently in community college. I spend most of my days going to school, work and home. Lately I’ve been starting to feel increasingly more depressed. I’m not even sure why I feel this way but I decided to tell my family and it’s pretty much gone ignored. My mom is super religious and just said it’s because I don’t spend enough time in church, My brothers also completely dismissed my feelings. I’m not at point where I want to take my own life but I’ve noticed that as days go on I’m starting to sleep more throughout the day and disassociate from the rest of the world. I do talk to people from my job and I have social media so I’m not in complete isolation but even then those interactions don’t feel genuine anymore. I feel like a complete joke all the time. I had gone to therapy before for my parents divorce but my therapist didn’t make me feel comfortable talking to her and was giving information from our sessions to the rest of the family. My life just seems to be string of terrible things happening to me most of which I’m not even comfortable saying. Oh god this all looks so rambly I’m sorry in advance. I just feel backed into a corner at this point and I’m kinda scared. Thank you for reading and if you have any advice please share I’m desperate.",2.920861268047709,5.070406755932204,4.391111111111112,83.04077840552421,76.35593220338984,7.353421217827997,25.5021971123666,8.285830014693849,1.780255492780916,1183,43,226,22,27,393,163,295,0.07200000000000001,0.765,0.163,0.982,3,1,0,0,1,0,18.0,1,2,0,5,14,13,0,1,9,0,13,3,1,2,4,48,46,23,0,3,15,3,8,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,11,11,0,1,12,2,2,6,8,5,0,0,8,12,29,8,34,37,12,35,1,2,1,0,22,14,0,7,15,143,40,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925422487275157,0.0873306936232909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878519770518856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699594886087895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770386546059157,0.0,0.0,0.08107231970500804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575463459379657,0.0,0.0600559546841749,0.0,0.08383197540424257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098842747110609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906088198252469,0.0,0.0848538276794315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179593174712827,0.0,0.1952115926699372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857489214656384,0.0,0.3985112535934371,0.0703816261232896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450790892657916,0.11198065196998842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711957185697326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882207422046994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776439575874386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113314343430886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917304047816684,0.04813115592598583,0.0,0.0869936281297332,0.0,0.08273071577224331,0.1102169858438262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576185445092322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153836601703604,0.07863651564867062,0.0,0.07242242293340884,0.0,0.07598352991835675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216394935081953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093931198883485,0.0,0.0,0.06830031359695066,0.0,0.0,0.2162874262866194,0.18626362662344031,0.0,0.0,0.10022871835396223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985451465574212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371364074550216,0.15669170870834762,0.09863419123084938,0.0997059675395612,0.0,0.08968752960976309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098589634928348,0.1004271898085338,0.08347439353062892,0.0,0.0,0.11028337931237543,0.139463783004522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928525071893346,0.0,0.07407364073720042,0.15837085455568262,0.08610949919094144,0.0907025855842718,0.11266447477616665,0.1143875556225986,0.06545130451359439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489384296779626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715982253343087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058108755601752625,0.07819938857314235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889761009523249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172263119823204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Blackjackx1031,2020/03/11,Post for a friend My friend which I feel is dangerously close to killing himself is at his wits end . He has tried getting help through multiple means but can’t get it. We live in Oregon and he can’t get the state insurance since he’s receiving unemployment and has applied multiple times for it . He is saying increasingly more disturbing things about ending his own life and I want to prevent my friend from ending it but I felt like I’ve exhausted all of my options. I apologize that this post is scrambled but I’m a little distraught . The cops have been called and they’ve only made things worse,4.14295652173913,6.3728923826087005,4.3889130434782615,84.07902173913047,73.0,8.078260869565218,28.02173913043478,8.841846274778883,2.257278260869565,484,19,92,10,10,151,79,115,0.193,0.6709999999999999,0.136,-0.91,2,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,1,9,2,2,4,0,10,2,0,1,1,17,19,7,1,1,3,0,2,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,8,6,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,3,3,11,4,10,16,4,13,0,0,0,0,16,4,0,1,5,53,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17801393141773994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4632230423750577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814822417501264,0.0,0.1673874392122159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4040687442684954,0.0,0.27324607736745365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685202841986547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19287411903649412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313686261621387,0.08517051168034884,0.17472790349421685,0.1539396193212787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649585138459812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18990022112496768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325884350464474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339264859802338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386369467967935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14421042107961815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23163877901214075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165522940625724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836096057058505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282637830930587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776606666179969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BombiniCan,2020/03/11,Does anyone else experience this? Whenever I begin to become extremely anxious words/ math equations and those types of things no longer make sense to me. It feels like my brain regresses and this has caused me to fail multiple classes despite knowing the content very well. Does anyone else experience this/ have any form of solutions on how to stop it from happening?,8.795312500000001,10.09553790625,7.7968750000000036,67.66062500000001,60.5625,11.4,37.875,11.20814326018867,4.7569187500000005,302,14,45,8,4,93,52,64,0.14400000000000002,0.7659999999999999,0.09,-0.6072,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,3,0,9,7,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,4,2,8,7,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,28,11,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132701624635398,0.0,0.0,0.22045221204972204,0.0,0.2728923013930882,0.39988717656955397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21551636500233654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21784033837032515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20046213045006436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34153597086813153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260282043840167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817679607299421,0.0,0.0,0.09866844877656904,0.13940777449747382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725613103408321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724362487017504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533535527978174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302572032048626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314544953640925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964208420267434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610106127550539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17545394235237374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SmallPenisJBone,2020/03/11,"I think I may need some help. Greetings, all. My name is Jessy, and I am 24. I have noticed some things about myself that worry me greatly.

I think I may be bipolar. I go through stages of feeling confident, upbeat, at the top of the world. Then, in a flash, I crash. I feel like absolute trash. I workout regularly, eat pretty healthy, and yet I often think it isn't enough. I have considered starving myself several times to lose stubborn weight. 

Here is a good example: At work today, a gorgeous girl came in. It was her first day working, and before she came in I felt good. Confident. As soon as I saw her, I crashed. I almost cried. I felt so utterly worthless and disgusting. 

I have considered suicide before. Never told anyone. Too afraid that it will make me look weak, and unmanly. I can feel that sink beginning, and I thought maybe someone here has some advice for me. Should I seek help? 

If you read this far, thanks. I appreciate your time.",1.6830699015133312,4.381200127071825,2.7995724237328865,89.00761229882298,86.40331491712708,6.020754263752103,24.444150852750425,7.423996415210882,1.4148797021378818,737,30,142,13,23,235,121,181,0.151,0.642,0.20600000000000002,0.8425,0,0,0,0,0,1,38.0,0,2,0,5,8,12,2,1,5,0,15,4,0,1,2,32,34,11,1,3,1,0,6,1,0,4,2,0,0,1,8,8,2,1,9,2,0,3,2,6,0,1,8,8,33,6,13,21,5,22,0,2,2,0,10,8,0,8,11,96,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13496487324685752,0.0,0.0,0.13830272776995378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657357262007536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350522445695393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159346872436565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171339711864065,0.0890730748791107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14132664245003254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271023753067386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20950604809129705,0.0986697445512904,0.2652250888975896,0.0,0.0,0.11748097821396394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849422450975106,0.23168946592505016,0.0,0.15227283213472187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851518236456818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747625938417827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598223913572632,0.15451592180284826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921931722425008,0.0,0.13875558901477628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241089709171823,0.1065231922038344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572454181567574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405131222652468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13815288127269762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603120792310718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170248194012042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15107594569587535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271582008358882,0.0,0.0,0.09175780459508416,0.2654965167240947,0.0,0.10964828352119713,0.16107252361987145,0.0,0.13091734956004286,0.1319752840815483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818747686740992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010994655474208,0.14026299987309726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bleepbloop928,2020/03/11,"Might do a 3 month impatient program but I feel like nothing helps I have anxiety, depression, PTSD, and I'm on the autism spectrum.

I was hospitalized for short stays multiple times this past fall, none of which were helpful. I'm on the best meds available for me but it isn't enough. I have an Adult Rehabilitative Mental Health worker and a case manager, /and/ a therapist. Somehow none of those things really help. Coping skills have never done anything for me other than buy me a little time, maybe 15 minutes of distraction. They don't fix the fact that I'm poor and can't work and hate my life. I am in the process of applying for disability but it keeps getting rejected, which makes me more depressed.

There's a 3 month impatient program in my city but I'm so afraid it'll be a waste of time. I mostly want to go there because I can't handle taking care of myself. Laundry, cooking, dishes, maintaining my house is unmanageable right now. I just feel so hopeless, all the support in the world and it does nothing for me.",4.239772727272726,6.129506550505053,4.969583333333336,81.47437500000005,71.87878787878788,8.182323232323233,29.04166666666667,8.841846274778883,2.3760696969696973,819,33,154,16,16,264,127,198,0.187,0.6890000000000001,0.124,-0.9437,0,1,0,0,0,1,25.0,0,0,1,4,7,11,1,2,13,0,16,4,0,1,3,22,31,12,0,1,5,0,2,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,11,6,2,1,2,1,2,2,7,7,0,0,3,2,18,4,18,25,7,20,0,4,0,0,5,9,0,3,9,100,29,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334442585802408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192567141884862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031889828996284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15548811468275978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510622348336876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25522545672601193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12965859578319858,0.15162237255629796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530921696965976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14983150950639884,0.10584780418096723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740914545138265,0.0,0.08420454864891361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628046425238173,0.0,0.157490530108908,0.0,0.0,0.2979319658035054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17096041498755046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13169424055867604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465203453808962,0.07238504490551305,0.1484984285188133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890007202029176,0.0,0.1488498270857106,0.0,0.16457589009220858,0.0,0.14931363537360573,0.1571777181419651,0.0,0.0,0.2365248707176366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142725770741396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843331311211656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143851869914795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17319482669162062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491712595313163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653054471720526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579222343282144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813381892022272,0.0,0.0,0.11140027094554494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720288696807167,0.09843303210141842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25918542228800273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739048133613246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786455841636304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ABlindCookie,2020/03/11,"Someone please help me I went for a walk 2h ago and i started feeling like im not even there, like everything is a hallucination (the feeling you get when you're REALLY sick) and i started worrying, since i had moved out for college and now live alone. There is nobody to take care about me, etc. Then all of my friends, acquaintances, even hobbies and everything i know became distant, not important, i was alone and nothing mattered. I tried thinking about all the things i could do, because it usually helps you see a wider picture, but it didnt work. Everything was so dark and lonely and scary and deadly and it was a really horrible experience, i felt like crying, so i called my mom and told her i dont feel ok, now they're coming for a 1h ride to pick me up, im packing my things and moving back home, idk whats gonna happen to college, idk when i can come back, since its probably gonna close down bc of the coronavirus soon, and i feel like im annoying the only person i've chatted with - my potencial love interest. Ive never been so self-conscious or worried. I've literally broke down and cried uncontrollably and hysterically for the past 45 minutes, just calmed down. I feel like i have failed, i feel ""ashamed"" for some reason and it just feels awful...

Do you think it could be a sort of an ""attack"" from some strange mental illness? (My ears were ""muffled"" and i physically didn't feel like i was actually in the real world) Also, do you think something like that could have been caused by a past traumatic relationship, considering im trying to start this next one now.",5.033885281385281,6.0640035357142885,5.799480519480523,79.60612554112558,68.83766233766234,9.113419913419913,30.25108225108225,9.362217197678863,2.5892796536796543,1251,48,243,25,21,409,178,308,0.182,0.684,0.134,-0.9599,0,4,1,0,0,0,45.0,0,4,0,2,20,20,2,2,14,2,24,4,1,3,3,54,52,25,1,3,6,1,9,7,1,2,2,1,1,1,11,21,0,0,14,1,0,7,6,7,0,1,13,11,32,13,23,33,5,33,0,3,1,1,15,8,0,4,25,149,43,4,0.0,0.0,0.07956571929768831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227524105068739,0.0,0.0,0.16888989909301086,0.0,0.06520295349915703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275704154242778,0.0,0.12538969401963326,0.0,0.049702554980855934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325564052683494,0.0,0.08312965696556457,0.08375818992721798,0.0,0.14046916681384106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19529552185534169,0.0,0.17912320890763128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555759712237404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093230164669187,0.1077052777264364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198333253802472,0.07975619457688678,0.0,0.0,0.3298095517152255,0.23299249244682335,0.0782857181838011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629932010620808,0.0,0.04259830866699118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210051580898172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930145068394707,0.0,0.08178555487286919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3522841589659933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044809121205049804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.278834797548174,0.0,0.07199628426257533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358789272581084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216740141938643,0.0,0.0,0.09549199148807977,0.0,0.17331612361834522,0.0,0.0,0.06288428172138917,0.0,0.08671265735419961,0.0,0.0,0.0782343637378001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055249754555352235,0.06201051231399616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15566743804793398,0.0,0.07119260938037672,0.0,0.08950018156576921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790777003022356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280388815097176,0.10446592597187652,0.08383084409272662,0.0,0.08753732919882967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497228405379545,0.0,0.08505806110543987,0.0,0.0,0.13489203774117312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06908375124112287,0.06276909067098912,0.0,0.0,0.1731312002050388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061303649583694136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083355373588917,0.15673166949201242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790952160505868,0.0,0.11071288080876003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979851684224997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558311672075073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05935794442447063,0.1656040870842308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JuBForrester,2020/03/11,"How does a typically strong person get back their confidence after being emotionally abused and bullied? Growing up I was very emotionally abused and bullied by my dad. My mom was very subordinate. 

Fast forward at age 27, I finally was at a place where I was emotionally healed from my dad's abuse with the help of an incredible therapist, and for about 2 years was on a journey towards loving myself and others while feeling protected and safe in what seemed like a solid community.

My therapist died of cancer after those two years, and that year it all crumbled when a friend of a friend from Boston entered the community that we had created, and the negativity, witty and aggressive insults, and gossiping about friends completely shifted the dynamic of the group into one of being toxic and judgmental. The ""friend"" moved a few blocks up from me, and what seemed like her social blackmail of getting close, gaining intimate details about you, and then gossiping about others (which meant if you betrayed her, she surely would tell everyone her thoughts about you and what you shared, if she hadn't already). So I foolishly did not dare stray, and tried to be strong in her presence. To make matters worse, she was extremely intelligent and influential as a result.

All it did was make me feel weaker and weaker and more and more scared and tiny. It was horrendous. It seemed that everyone started to see me in this light, and all my freedom left me. I get paranoid in large groups now. I become weak among those who are confident. Everything has reversed.

Ever since this, I haven't been able to recover in the same way I did with my therapist. He was someone who had a love that was strong beyond human capacity it seemed. It felt like an army of love.

How do I become strong again and feel like I have a force of love behind me that so many from healthy, big families feel? I have very few friends now and am left with a very dysfunctional family and verbally/emotionally abusive dad.",8.314504132231402,8.372355898071625,7.9694917355371935,70.25241942148763,61.64462809917354,11.557520661157026,36.60730027548209,11.10651602901591,4.173261267217631,1593,67,273,39,20,507,194,363,0.157,0.616,0.22699999999999998,0.9791,0,0,0,0,3,0,40.0,1,4,1,5,17,27,2,1,20,0,28,7,0,5,5,58,50,33,1,3,3,4,5,4,5,1,3,0,0,2,23,29,0,3,11,0,0,5,4,6,0,2,20,7,36,21,44,26,8,43,0,0,1,4,40,21,0,6,22,201,59,0,0.07752435787996446,0.36741474884378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555005668582025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05961144591666391,0.0,0.0,0.17123912499791144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128281427451095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804580439617704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784208800818554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3488178724866291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012522005567774,0.0,0.14815569237535325,0.06967389406305913,0.0,0.14616613023613326,0.0,0.1567945787617358,0.05538341675954575,0.0744355410075432,0.0849241446968248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994756329528803,0.0,0.12150983187722406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05196294294361081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684608833395823,0.0,0.0,0.15149794141431305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27987503895872545,0.0,0.10349622174276182,0.07859753096117107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09079559098652704,0.0,0.08239612362355013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253251124561551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769127904690489,0.08099645376609174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761540647142325,0.0,0.06177687611788115,0.28230105521065463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412894995291614,0.0,0.0,0.07902631998602744,0.06568613685564373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487213952311905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306578983877672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06775970581147997,0.0,0.0,0.27003526406400097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154568060188492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05263395016799453,0.0,0.07573003291894778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25586285703411965,0.0,0.061535226823281226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900394377086728,0.05507107955543672,0.0,0.0,0.1497694342163485
mentalhealth,mantas283,2020/03/11,"I'm falling apart... Hi, I'm 20yo men and my life is really though at the moment for me. To understand why I'm in this situation I have to start from the beginning. I came to London at October 14 of 2018. I found a job and I found my best friend Anton. I was so happy about my life, everything in my head seemed so good, I had very good attitude in my life, then at 2019 summer my friend had to go back at Spain, because of his girlfriend. I understood (even if it was sad). But I still had that healthy thinking.  Then I started working at new department at my workplace and I meet this woman. She clearly showed me that she likes me and I started feeling same and because we were working together our connection only got stronger (Oh I forgot to mention one important thing about her, she's 33yo, but I didn't care about that, I even told her that this is not a problem for me) but, then I saw first flag, it's how aggressive she was, when she was in a bad mood ( at that time I thought it's just a bad day for her) then there started appearing more flags like, she was started getting angry because of basic communication misunderstandings, I really tried  to explain everything to her, one time I even said sorry, because I thought she was hurting, then she just say I only give 2 chances and you used your first one. And when second time, she got angry on me ( actually I don't even know why I just asked her if everything is alright after she got angry on colleague for making mistake at work). She said it was your last chance. And all that time I was with her she was always making me feel guilty about who I'm, everytime I showed some kind of emotion or feeling she just backed (even tho she was showing it constantly to me) she was so toxic, she was poisoning my mind. I even cried after all this situation(I haven't done that since like 12, because people I grow around was saying 'man up', 'you're are not kid anymore' and more similar stuff like this). I was feeling so terrible after all this I still feeling terrible and I feel like I'm going downhill. I don't have my charisma anymore I don't want to talk, laugh, everyday it's hard to wake up and start a day, I missed so many days at work just to be alone, get high so my mind could be quiet. I just want to be a person I was, I miss my laugh, I miss myself...

×All this short-term relationships with her lasted for about 8-9 months it didn't went any further because I think all this time she was only playing with me×",3.4283345638645737,4.782030865731464,4.476405969834406,86.35774997363147,73.00801603206412,7.577280877544563,26.959234257989664,8.119692808369301,1.5976941883767541,1938,69,403,29,38,632,225,499,0.14,0.732,0.128,-0.9394,3,3,0,0,0,0,62.0,2,3,0,7,34,31,2,0,8,1,37,6,2,4,5,68,92,33,0,7,14,0,7,5,3,0,4,5,0,5,25,17,0,1,17,4,0,8,8,13,0,6,38,13,86,17,51,50,9,68,0,5,1,0,52,21,0,6,44,274,111,5,0.0,0.0,0.06855350816148116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275743359113222,0.0,0.0,0.058453322223865366,0.0,0.0,0.047772159392017816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933751856226514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625370671432877,0.06567392383712065,0.0,0.0,0.10803526302803493,0.11731101842584718,0.2569411454029726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372265575929278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034686541849817,0.07162418272030291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591489661690654,0.0,0.0560886156734582,0.0,0.07716592316483188,0.13591560500359245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188976469475833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902138176545656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27839532027714753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189407521211942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21312195121355215,0.05018635184066389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950860385914028,0.0,0.15405019322418506,0.108549384364144,0.0,0.0734050675754456,0.06738984917464473,0.07984897065703231,0.11784411835226555,0.16855514677141373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478204059861278,0.06292987271996953,0.0,0.07209639046169898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422259422060942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752036850473704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06971192104091872,0.0,0.0,0.07315418244857445,0.03860736110166013,0.11452565395195692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488581799162425,0.17160211115100038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378435102898144,0.07122210173038733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186420679014938,0.0,0.056072586827631526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784753328959643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280890815525674,0.1602840343632263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04870225025775568,0.061339269867401215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721941134599459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000742746905316,0.0,0.0,0.075421815634118,0.0,0.0,0.1336469759446792,0.11173065552615567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395262747738786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058111222344451326,0.078963530818814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863871270397944,0.29833831079581496,0.0,0.11220289529313664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08041902268980916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05646399398413478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04667073464593819,0.09002625652121693,0.06901990773039837,0.11154072325907732,0.20481562962921432,0.0,0.0,0.06712653479856942,0.0,0.047694889489454634,0.0,0.0,0.07313234542323065,0.0,0.06067312763960935,0.0,0.057963304348943936,0.08287010727897062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512211357758327,0.12677873427414826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045702779272137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lizzledizzles,2020/03/11,"Depression/mental health greeting cards Today I wished there was a card I could send people to let them know I’m moving home bc of a minor(ish) breakdown so I don’t have to talk to them about it but can still keep them in the loop. Then I thought it might be nice to also have ones for “Sorry I disappeared and didn’t talk to you for a while, it’s not you it’s depression and I want to do my part in being a friend/relative/whatever again.”",0.3711436950146627,2.6384241397849486,2.04490713587488,95.4600879765396,87.1720430107527,5.532355816226785,18.131964809384165,6.980632752743323,0.09150322580645164,347,9,78,5,11,113,64,93,0.045,0.8240000000000001,0.131,0.7991,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,3,0,6,2,0,0,5,0,12,1,0,0,0,11,18,7,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,3,3,1,0,1,3,0,12,1,12,10,1,10,0,1,0,0,8,2,0,1,5,58,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837976307338344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18350321206642697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19795511010248396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775686604089214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443020819923568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305415691649566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20428642365124056,0.0,0.0,0.12631038734863212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350201513145655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438168425640342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442764566595595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15574101234587326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488870989831333,0.0,0.15933749210698106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572795958802355,0.0,0.0,0.1835451939954617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3694626489807002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18246199115891934,0.0,0.0,0.21785512286068567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13556165264011502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642969865475944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_Retarded_Bear,2020/03/11,"Asked for help, but now I feel more alone After years of dealing with my issues, I swallowed my pride and I finally got myself a therapist. There’s only one problem with it, I feel more lonely and vulnerable now that I’m getting help. I thought that I would feel better once I made the decision. I’ve told some people too, and they’ve seemed supportive. Getting help and talking about your feelings is what I hear all the time, but I don’t feel better. I liked it better when I was fighting on my own.",5.554933333333337,5.708169160000002,6.0139999999999985,81.63033333333334,67.4,8.666666666666668,30.66666666666667,8.344100000000001,2.1443666666666665,396,14,78,5,6,128,67,100,0.14,0.599,0.261,0.9316,1,3,0,0,2,0,11.0,0,1,0,4,6,9,1,0,3,0,4,1,0,1,1,21,20,7,0,2,2,0,5,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,6,1,0,8,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,5,6,16,6,7,14,5,8,0,1,0,0,10,1,0,2,8,52,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16937562274644946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15288557057448152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4339071254903117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860007424220178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4134475959596135,0.0,0.0,0.17914743604590613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088328188161456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079595006040726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843187493309829,0.0,0.3288473977917721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706907554222169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989620580665625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547432217063873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17416219591963214,0.11081730328049587,0.12437770638047728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337637351142345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648338726952074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488784797732954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18558051897383124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13144532004191292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898797464951241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12983057902895995,0.0953600837863596,0.0,0.0,0.15626717536810766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617241171939033,0.0,0.0,0.10531284608434806
mentalhealth,Benedictatorr,2020/03/11,"My (35) brother/roommate (26) seems to be suffering. I want to help, but not sure how. I'm pretty certain my brother is suffering from depression and anxiety. He hasn't ever gone to find help, and doesn't seem to be interested in doing so. I would bring up the idea of finding help, but I have learned that it usually doesn't go well if I bring up uncomfortable subjects. He tends to get very irate and then sometimes starts crying. I have learned that unless he brings it up, it's best not to approach the subject. 

We have a new situation that is forcing him out of his comfort zone, and it's not going well. It has to do with a new roommate and some basic cleanliness issues, specifically dirty dishes. I propose that we all agree to not leave dirty dishes in the kitchen or to leave dishes in the drying rack (we can stash stuff in our rooms for a day or so if we don't feel like immediately doing them). Everyone agrees to this.

Now a side note, I have had issues like this in the past with my brother. He'll usually be good for a week or two, before going back to leaving the dishes lying around or w/e the current issue is. Then if I approach the subject, he becomes irate and sometimes starts crying. I came to the conclusion that it was just easier for me if I just did all the cleaning. I can't really push that onto the new roommate, so now I'm pretty much forced to stop enabling my brother.

Well it happened pretty much like I thought it might. A couple weeks go by and it's all good, then dishes start piling up and the kitchen is all dirty again the next week. I talk with him as nicely as I can, but he get's irate and starts crying. I tell him it's not fair to treat me that way when I need to talk about these things and I try so hard to be nice. Well he stomped off and cleaned his stuff up and now is pretty much only coming home to sleep and is barricading himself in his room when he is here. 

I'm giving him his space, and letting him decide when he wants to start talking. (pretty sure it won't go well if I try to start talking with him) I really want him to go get help, maybe get on some medication or therapy or something, anything. I'm just not sure how anything can get better for him if he doesn't try to get help, I know I certainly can't do it for him. 

He has a tendency to want me to be wrong or to want to do the opposite of whatever I suggest, so I'm unsure if it would even help for me to give him phone #s or websites or w/e - I feel like he'd just see it as condescending. Not sure of what to do or how to help, just giving him his space until he decides to talk with me again. Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks!",3.927052525252524,4.381504434545459,5.1076060606060585,85.65496464646465,71.01818181818182,8.002020202020201,27.095959595959602,7.984000788550335,1.451535353535354,2069,65,450,26,36,687,217,550,0.17,0.654,0.17600000000000002,0.1841,1,0,1,0,0,0,59.0,5,0,1,4,33,29,0,0,21,0,45,9,1,3,11,101,94,53,0,16,33,3,3,4,0,6,1,0,7,0,28,27,7,1,14,0,0,15,15,4,5,1,6,4,56,25,68,74,10,70,0,3,1,0,57,21,0,22,37,302,84,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05787075815411773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040272785629718234,0.0,0.045304437088129416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09746882333926644,0.05271986719934081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04553783044089543,0.0,0.0,0.06540571293895052,0.05039330335303768,0.0,0.062149518657588665,0.052376779529374494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06773384599314686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05101424922163839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06552768273333964,0.1951567641752348,0.03819309610245313,0.0,0.051007561951111724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039115373181531576,0.053569416601472776,0.0,0.05658887059772121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059888540127723974,0.08461598617015341,0.0,0.0,0.1082551186748103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18564535839852694,0.17043254799256485,0.20194233538634876,0.09934470152749517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236955220731965,0.0,0.05305100933285945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27786539212601424,0.0,0.05940419201807954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06685408886947837,0.0,0.18543620017565973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032546696594085184,0.0,0.0,0.18812168262450715,0.0,0.06055819888524783,0.0,0.11573092150648814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0594961558606379,0.0,0.0,0.05965963057956136,0.0,0.06282486314887697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060428711765387,0.04391213888002565,0.0,0.17159005570095553,0.06298294797747454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04504077017471096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05653381208415317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30124878868366617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587787275425655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0471920260709172,0.10782641980736647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656767015985257,0.05926446748334701,0.0,0.0,0.04559175664719521,0.11714354778983498,0.0,0.2515045371346489,0.0,0.0,0.049511991535114916,0.0,0.0,0.13558935172937905,0.0,0.0,0.2232629990797258,0.0,0.0,0.23800078900146104,0.05176237459970029,0.054523383091146314,0.06772517320662705,0.0,0.039344264850028635,0.0,0.0,0.04701541330730717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206229371554964,0.0,0.057850993971317995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044866775625086,0.04886410327989437,0.17465246013745087,0.04700742755238711,0.1425122224899904,0.0,0.2662370949737881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620818591609598,0.06474963029244317,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vanquish10,2020/03/11,"Unbearable anxiety and panic due to the ongoing COVID-19 situation in the United States. Can’t do anything or concentrate on anything. High anxiety levels and panic due to Covid-19. Anyone else in the same boat as me?

I’m an international student at Rutgers who’s currently living with some relatives of mine in New Jersey itself. They’re all living their everyday lives like normal. They’re going to work, they’re taking the dog out for walks, they’re eating from restaurants etc.

I on the other hand am unbelievably stressed, panicked and anxious with the way the situation is unfolding in front of us. I have cousins and siblings who work in NY/NJ, I’m constantly thinking about how they’re still working and going to office and interacting with a bunch of people on an everyday basis, even as the virus grows. 

The problem is that I can’t see any end to this situation and there’s no guarantee who gets it and who doesn’t. Even if you get it, there’s no guarantee that we make it through. At a point, I’m not even all that concerned for myself as I am for my grand parents. 

My entire day goes by literally just thinking about this and reading up on the virus. And as the virus spreads and as we get over 1000+ cases; there’s no stopping domestic or international travel for anyone. We’re in a situation where the virus is constantly on the move.

I know that I personally have a very low chance of coming into contact with someone who’s infected.

But I can’t help but fear for everything; all the time.

I don’t know who to talk to at this point tbh. I’ve gone to caps, but it’s not been a whole lotta help. 

Is there anyone out here who also feels the same way?",5.533101080923167,6.263579739263808,6.318273444347067,77.41330265848674,67.55828220858896,9.522407245106633,31.16798130295063,9.606745405546679,2.8144766579024245,1329,51,253,27,21,438,167,326,0.092,0.851,0.057,-0.7966,2,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,3,1,1,3,15,8,0,4,22,0,15,3,1,2,3,47,33,24,0,3,9,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,20,21,1,1,5,2,0,9,10,6,0,0,2,3,18,2,50,31,10,50,0,1,1,0,20,25,0,5,14,170,38,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804220749867298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06838788731936997,0.0,0.1538644367507666,0.11361022201788985,0.0,0.21095289536887696,0.10304108652338524,0.16551343055739773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662814535673015,0.0,0.21735083620968126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06485633193212785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290346040071466,0.0840094466273894,0.0,0.08907105174717872,0.0,0.1121569497897167,0.1992673979536988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038165312834068,0.0,0.0,0.11316397888312905,0.050848863195523265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762373589268086,0.0,0.11430721318352688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348136701073884,0.10625281491793917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105361739691307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04913115082305235,0.0,0.2664031425419527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712815279982805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688505306913816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712664280948134,0.0,0.0,0.09853269208774228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359835431339877,0.11166592135255507,0.0,0.0,0.06971935213344503,0.08780978564358502,0.0,0.0,0.19013352487435645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622745940959837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005925655689162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013756463196105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4521586728925597,0.0,0.0,0.08520869568814858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080311619339278,0.0840771365853177,0.11519726997511327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561262855744405,0.08083061991193555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288764327405806,0.0,0.0,0.058640464984586485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12096773515637793,0.0,0.0,0.08297694675983737,0.0,0.1596481896327463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122776231706889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21963832010882606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheBalisongAssassin,2020/03/11,Im finally going to get help... Im finally gonna go to the doctors but i have to wait till April 9th for an opening and I’ve been having major panic attacks every night recently so I’m terrified of having to wait basically a month.,1.1565306122449002,3.2595262857142906,4.848326530612244,77.75738775510206,82.06122448979592,8.001632653061224,26.126530612244892,8.841846274778883,2.5198865306122453,184,8,35,5,5,69,38,49,0.267,0.733,0.0,-0.9452,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,5,11,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,7,9,1,10,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,18,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26519765290121106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23859919985252695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19640624731760475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5107238694480172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179098522541874,0.0,0.2649649438864776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15624952940538533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5036002149191299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860671427583963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187590779606267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735057767712257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23016919582657944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,May01031,2020/03/11,"Why do I have unhealthy obsession with men who seem cold and somewhat distant\uncaring? I am an adult female and I find myself often obsessing over men who are cold and distant and somewhat seem dark and judgemental of others. I dislike their personality, their cynicism and distance they have from other people. I even feel a lot of anger towards them even if they have done nothing to me. However I find myself craving attention from them and somehow in my mind I feel like if they give me attention and approval it will make me feel wonderful about myself and loved. I feel like when I get love and attention from men who are normal and non-cynical people, I can't feel the same joy and happiness, as when a cold person gives it to me. I also quickly develop sexual feelings for these types of men, which are kind of strange, they are not normal psysical sexual feelings (which I have for other men), but I can also feel them in my gut and feel some type of fear at the same time which is very exiting and feels good and bad at the same time. These types of men are usually very unpleasant to be in relationship with, as they don't give you much emotional security, which is what I crave a lot in a relationship. I experience mostly pain with these types but still obsess over them for some reason. I am mostly obsessed with their personality and feel anger and wish to change them but also a deep need for approval. Am I just an insecure woman? Is this related to some kind of trauma?
I did have some neglect and abuse, growing up, verbal and psysical however I still belive I was raised in a loving family and my parents were not perfect but they still loved me.

TL;DR I feel myself drawn and attached to cold and distant men and I don't know why",7.488839137645107,7.094184373134329,7.730422885572139,72.78770729684909,63.4776119402985,11.145936981757878,33.83499170812604,10.62613485830676,3.5128076285240457,1395,51,255,31,18,456,153,335,0.16699999999999998,0.7090000000000001,0.124,-0.9587,3,0,0,0,1,0,28.0,0,1,14,3,15,26,3,6,11,0,27,6,1,2,1,81,54,36,0,6,9,1,12,2,0,1,1,0,0,12,17,27,0,2,22,0,0,1,5,13,0,0,4,16,49,13,38,48,14,23,0,1,0,4,40,13,0,17,11,201,66,4,0.0,0.10216632671419562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20687000111216103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199695218968881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121801094655603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824139490235808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699512835662498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390583671101935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434773362955919,0.08128828068686965,0.09703070722506772,0.523194875911657,0.12320289850117155,0.0,0.0,0.15762204049132048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045050679907368364,0.2481538638502633,0.0,0.07232413006632561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179153116003322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17958681961507322,0.047388768228336216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425349405689651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661627832171767,0.31129729831899683,0.0,0.057557998624337726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706590950068935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338765465750684,0.06393712387309447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689706723362449,0.08273829146741106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175289318957744,0.0,0.0957462209151126,0.0,0.0,0.11955956500554345,0.22587343657502534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865695943727434,0.0,0.18515365145181256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699784469282166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20658587564144948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056072339657766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496818923121747,0.14229460481941633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561509213177213,0.0,0.09915818407224038,0.0,0.09351081367024336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lavendargirl94,2020/03/11,"Dx Depression advice How do you support the people in your lives that are diagnosed with depression? I want to be supportive but also don’t want to come off as too strong, and don’t want to come off as not seeming supportive enough! All advice is welcomed :)",4.496224489795917,6.503281428571434,5.0813775510204096,80.45022959183675,71.44897959183673,8.981632653061224,28.5765306122449,9.516144504307137,2.7960571428571432,206,8,37,5,4,66,36,49,0.11199999999999999,0.544,0.344,0.9176,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,1,3,7,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,1,1,12,15,6,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,3,5,9,14,2,5,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,28,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3610420809579032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773262448189184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182659305833699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182242102716981,0.1875022781599504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908807821344389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631245128672291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280720855505228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817593302396566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6289057419921489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.326884715167443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gachui,2020/03/11,"Hey anyone up for a talk? Been through some shit, reddit's all I got .",-1.0380000000000005,1.0296988666666709,0.7083333333333357,103.34250000000002,93.66666666666666,3.0,14.166666666666668,3.1291,-1.5903333333333332,53,1,13,0,2,17,15,15,0.247,0.753,0.0,-0.5574,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4157710305365675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4755706764267254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6103672716098284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4779317688092742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Milkyweed,2020/03/11,"I don’t know who else to turn to but Reddit Okay, so a few months ago I had this strange experience and I think I might have been dissociating. I have never been professionally diagnosed but I know that I have depression and anxiety, but I also have symptoms for other disorders so I’m a bit confused. Anyway, I had a weird experience a few months ago that I think is a symptoms of DID (dissociative identity disorder) Here is the diary entry I wrote that day explaining my experience:

My father just walked down the hallway, and I can’t tell if I was asleep or not. I wasn’t on my phone and it just felt like I blacked out or something. It’s weird.
And I remember it being around 3pm when I “blacked out,” and now it’s 3:13pm. My head feels so weird. This is so weird. I didn’t have that sensation of waking up. It just felt like when my dad started walking down the hallway I went back to reality. It was as if I wasn’t aware of my surroundings or if I was just staring into the unknown without really knowing. What if I did something without knowing? What is this? I feel so weird.

Last thing I remember is being on my phone listening to music TRYING to fall asleep. My Dad came upstairs and disturbed my pretended sleep and then went back downstairs. I just don’t know if I resumed sleeping or decided to play on my phone. But when I “woke up” I was propped up on a pillow on my back, no earbuds in or anything. And mind you, I never sleep on my back, I sleep on my side. Plus, whenever I’m napping I listen to music to help me fall asleep. But I don’t remember ever adjusting to that position, or getting off my phone. And I feel like if I was trying to fall asleep without my music, then I would’ve plugged my phone in. But my phone wasn’t plugged in.",2.899644517628825,4.499094890449442,4.5442154203797,84.34747191011238,74.81460674157303,7.831693142192947,28.006199147617203,8.53829466247534,2.022299418829912,1375,56,284,26,29,463,148,356,0.08900000000000001,0.8540000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.8404,0,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,0,0,23,13,0,2,10,1,32,13,10,0,3,68,57,41,0,6,27,3,5,3,0,1,3,2,1,0,19,16,0,0,18,3,0,8,15,8,0,0,22,10,54,5,39,32,3,50,0,1,3,0,17,22,0,14,23,212,73,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16573065242648674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747567760858156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151276094060724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692695363441097,0.08321796941242354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875246833539785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205711457130948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691743783667916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06028755518677479,0.0,0.08051510665229802,0.09488131597974724,0.0,0.0,0.21427480486524364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809143685553145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455897764929263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2743272655364369,0.0,0.0,0.1418005099005432,0.06678289346106248,0.1795129696098611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048839999597470506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593854477442948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265838919965709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568737504023792,0.07619954694769136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370103833377867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916864016547276,0.09438922994526387,0.0,0.1492313927931987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14419672470892028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05988636570410823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176874800617042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3741943145360887,0.0,0.0,0.14393258601275036,0.0,0.0,0.06616638088009273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19432524525543315,0.0,0.0,0.08170657353640162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210466760972631,0.11979778719606525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693501745351254,0.1016805579203345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17331577265542972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703372402213409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640626840890107,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xSYPHx,2020/03/11,"Sorta Vent Honestly I believe my life is absolutely meaningless. It’s been making me more angry then sad recently but I don’t know how to feel. I’m not looking for “what no you’re wrong your life means something” I just need to say how I feel.

No matter what I play, I lose. No matter who I talk to, I end up causing some sort of issue. I have a hard time working a part time job because of my emotional issues. Literally nothing ever goes a positive way for me. I have no hobby’s because nothing interests me or I get upset about my lack of skill in anything. I’m mediocre in every aspect of my life and I have one person who means anything to me. My life has been ruined by prejudices and ignorance and I’ve never recovered. I also have the worst luck out of anyone I’ve ever met. 

I don’t know what to do. This isn’t a cry for help I just want to mean something again.",0.7695604395604398,2.9811343626373628,3.3249340659340696,87.43256593406595,84.49450549450547,6.0575824175824176,22.286813186813184,7.365786028017652,1.0109705494505494,682,24,140,11,20,237,107,182,0.295,0.616,0.08900000000000001,-0.9924,1,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,4,9,12,1,1,5,0,12,4,0,4,3,33,27,9,0,3,5,0,3,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,7,4,0,1,7,1,0,0,9,8,0,1,3,5,25,4,20,24,5,14,0,3,1,0,8,4,0,5,9,95,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242622411925388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955712115619757,0.0,0.2107992828563044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561538170455577,0.0,0.0,0.14430327845011326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315743332611332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069081963265795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407373764374348,0.11344163291359467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317129563227588,0.10791365564014496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952307084176434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691696735306325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147353003661904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858499062044657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673663001386236,0.1271004986030398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14077979124655998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618692203760484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755567139582142,0.1432897298301113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549497416625026,0.0,0.0,0.41855284137320603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497034095072224,0.09878386158161652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457940950217459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679091113094191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869909899847552,0.0,0.0,0.1118352739055484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646440567255934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185504727579743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19720581979193988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029465503366365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493699686301205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554541459460082,0.10166463159682856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324439757100338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400363230337586,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Opening-Contract,2020/03/11,I'm lost So I'm a 17m and i moved from Alabama to new York around 3 years ago and i suffer from severe depression and anxiety. I haven't been able to go to school and i haven't had a single freind since I've been here I also have lyme disease and im always in pain and i cant sleep without taking something. I was able to get a lone distance gf and we met in person several times and she left me and i just can't handle it anymore,-1.5891836734693854,0.3719247755102053,1.5889795918367329,96.13816326530615,97.16326530612244,4.4326530612244905,16.183673469387756,6.1826913282559595,-0.3930693877551024,340,9,80,4,14,120,63,98,0.215,0.785,0.0,-0.9531,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,0,9,2,1,0,0,13,16,11,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,11,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,6,0,11,0,10,10,1,10,0,4,0,0,5,4,0,0,4,48,12,1,0.3781701427036638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16761250701303174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121126324550527,0.15733392665397414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14464956203555193,0.0,0.1875215821066852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16832580186622015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628586948862636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878914558281424,0.0,0.10746140351642533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042443242211296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20544148327921727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20640869171611498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009675067363548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18261954017525714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20119984740712116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16510179095322347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913641869782284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4272246194036182,0.0,0.1564131249734482,0.0,0.18922162632901413,0.0,0.0,0.1455669257874129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216844172910093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025702568711733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18227126126665955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176458655299875
mentalhealth,badgamergril,2020/03/11,"I had a dream that I was bullied again and I haven't been feeling well ever since I was bullied badly in school, to the point it got physical and it ruined my self confidence completely. I am much older now. It stopped, I surrounded myself with a safe zone of people who never bring up my insecurities and with time I grew to have some self confidence and love myself *a bit* .

Just today, I dreamt I got bullied like the old days. Its so strange because I've done everything possible to get over these dreams and they stopped for years but now they're back. I woke up with a terrible panic attack and ever since then I've been feeling very weird, insecure and completely paranoid to even go out. This isn't me, I changed and everything around me changed, how could all my efforts go to waste like that by a single dream?! 
 
Any help is appreciated.",4.6741260162601606,6.091468323170737,5.209512195121949,82.05479674796749,70.03658536585365,8.637398373983741,29.52032520325203,9.075114841892004,2.4080544715447156,671,26,130,13,12,215,103,164,0.258,0.609,0.133,-0.966,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,1,12,13,1,3,7,0,12,1,0,1,4,27,22,12,0,1,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,9,13,0,3,2,3,0,4,3,8,1,0,9,2,19,5,17,12,5,28,0,1,0,1,6,8,0,1,18,90,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523212929224294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466545660781572,0.0,0.15931592948600526,0.0,0.10768225958115656,0.11692770660061108,0.08536719814400721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15288761403266168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29628789820294016,0.0,0.2936589432315069,0.0,0.0,0.1118106940866104,0.0,0.0,0.0903143353315966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330973213959575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249522271409884,0.2533487330529698,0.0,0.0,0.2517181803312384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161705249309803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316521772321959,0.0,0.1591761309147266,0.0,0.224005860798362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386598537598216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683312325784866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263917362345637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294565062096214,0.0,0.1080076253609318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14694861888369254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16430698601367866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708623291047466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13238324163361073,0.15787426933421803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14172814555777152,0.0,0.0,0.2921849131872582,0.0,0.0,0.2316853795209326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341597337090631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165855916984381,0.0,0.13274172273649035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554782040869145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125912946196726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901812889823981
mentalhealth,TheDwarfInTheCube,2020/03/11,"Is it possible to have panic or anxiety attacks without external symptoms? I get these really intense attacks but when I talk it sounds calm and collected.

I show no sign that I’m freaking out, but on the inside I feel like it’s hard to breathe an my life is ending.

Please help.",3.0812727272727263,5.242660036363642,4.576363636363637,81.84454545454548,75.9090909090909,8.036363636363637,31.0,8.841846274778883,2.879654545454545,222,11,41,5,5,74,45,55,0.233,0.556,0.21,0.1272,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,6,2,1,2,0,3,3,1,0,0,8,6,5,0,0,4,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,5,2,5,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,3,26,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18836710087168687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5602497713325127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21808880783004544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450249251913655,0.1759084653371272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864625851028924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22057585235875052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650443775850252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17392121577250047,0.12029670583357666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889006505485191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.270289216983624,0.0,0.2775900174550743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774277123481867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559297291384556,0.0,0.1979122642763216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373592327129748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EmmiAC,2020/03/11,"Feeling of apathy or indifference in a fight - why do I feel that way? A little context: I used to get very angry and emotional when fighting or being in an argument. Since quite a while that shifted into a feeling of apathy (idk if that’s the right word).. basically I just get super unemotional and I dont understand what exactly I did that hurt the other person. 

I’m not good with recognizing other people’s feelings and I’m the worst when it comes to knowing the intentions behind people’s actions and words. 

I know I hurt the other person very much when I behave like that but I don’t know where it comes from, I don’t know how to find out and I don’t know how to improve.. 

I hope this is the right subreddit for this problem :s",2.3138223938223947,4.443058567567569,4.478803088803087,81.78067567567571,78.18918918918921,7.4718146718146725,24.08494208494209,8.418075326091056,1.7395698841698843,580,20,112,12,14,200,85,148,0.192,0.725,0.083,-0.9109999999999999,0,0,0,0,3,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,7,10,2,0,11,0,8,0,0,4,1,36,26,15,0,3,6,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,13,10,0,0,11,0,0,3,5,6,0,0,1,4,12,4,14,24,2,16,0,2,0,0,4,8,0,4,5,78,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601663053609519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769845123766245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16986776456372554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30542408162859275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13802189923286426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15779469376655386,0.0,0.0,0.12666139533536416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998862798091908,0.0,0.0,0.323322158649866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.414960228454925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377665731575173,0.15135333116199706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101092786865384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20938490812684124,0.26371507102401365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14449774080798322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606194629676812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579262235662624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491838557083645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15720843848591012,0.0,0.13042556749792725,0.0,0.24920082935796264,0.0,0.11986600741386345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13626451287126334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tiredyetwoke,2020/03/11,"Just want to get better I don't know what to do anymore. I've been struggling with depression and anxiety for 6 years. It started in 2014, after the death of a loved one and then being a spectator from afar of a friend's death after an accident. Tried to get help once, had a bad experience with the therapist and didn't try again. Over the years I've had the depression manifest into physical symptoms like aches n pains, skin problems, sleep issues and what not. Intrusive thoughts are constant, and even though I've gotten much better at dealing with them, they still suck the life out of me. 

I've always been a very sensitive and empathetic person, which is what just makes everything exponentially worse most of the time. 

Lately I've been dealing with another issue which I don't understand. I have sudden moments of feeling like this is all a dream. I suddenly feel disconnected from the moment and question if this is really happening... like maybe I'm not really here or looking at this from the outside. This happens randomly during the day and started about 3 weeks ago. 

What's happening? Am I getting worse?

I'm making very slow progress in trying to help myself through breathing exercises and mindfulness...which I do very occasionally as and when I remember. Just don't have the energy or motivation to do anything anymore....

I just feel so resentful, empty and helpless most of the time...",5.594302325581396,7.59007381782946,6.1805348837209335,73.72754651162792,68.57364341085271,9.811162790697674,32.27984496124031,10.125756701596842,3.6499807751937983,1127,50,189,30,20,366,150,258,0.19,0.684,0.126,-0.9652,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,2,4,12,16,2,1,18,0,20,8,3,3,1,43,43,19,2,3,9,0,4,3,1,0,4,0,0,1,11,17,0,0,9,2,0,0,6,9,0,1,8,5,12,7,31,34,4,29,0,3,1,1,10,7,1,7,25,125,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470956673001538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889016475612489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203383906453213,0.08173433827947256,0.0,0.21191840764568154,0.0,0.0,0.0879224010996611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920915371759508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889872909232082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154589530059149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890467330398081,0.2203001707645172,0.18404684358899984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056856566450531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602328864357204,0.1045126176350526,0.0,0.0,0.16206856918918844,0.07632841374928613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254636986049421,0.0,0.1674626316826579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28344181966091153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322875837908142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22303194548669114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871792875663678,0.0,0.12052316805601268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546612661204563,0.15659377252727533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972092080078856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642966713523138,0.0,0.14263660310029194,0.0,0.10733780711107796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854164455796529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137839401147028,0.07239934782379168,0.0,0.1136881173944382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329088482826416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223399097607452,0.0,0.0,0.11968822517143778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13689228071764675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103189985948468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069198150241643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512475615945923,0.0,0.08532468192739898,0.0,0.0,0.11169514054926924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105042738554192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12405255681414346,0.0,0.0,0.10497236561265272,0.08482113326192361,0.12460162213259145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176174472834174,0.0,0.0,0.11122697138143317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644691383825915,0.06301856584355107,0.0,0.08570273281987471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21776358559274814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376063330953858
mentalhealth,AvailableBox2,2020/03/11,"Just started on Prozac, need advice Hi,

I'm just looking for advice. I just started 20mg a day of fluoxetine for general anxiety and the last few days have been hell. I fill very disconnected and dissociated from my body, I randomly start crying, I have completely lost my appetite and have had a pretty bad headache. My mood also hasn't been this low in a long time. I have never taken pills for my mental health before but I feel as though I don't have another option at this point, however, these side effects are making me question whether it is worth it and perhaps I would rather just suffer from anxiety than have these symptoms. I am only on day 4 so I know I should give it time but I feel so horrible I just don't know what to do.

Does anyone have any advice on what could help?",3.831666666666667,5.307346726114652,4.995302547770702,82.55159501061573,72.18471337579618,8.035881104033969,26.459129511677283,8.59863814320734,1.8412594479830149,624,21,123,11,12,206,101,157,0.16,0.789,0.051,-0.943,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,10,6,1,0,4,0,20,5,1,2,1,28,34,12,0,5,9,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,6,0,1,1,4,5,0,0,5,3,18,0,14,26,1,20,1,3,1,0,4,8,1,3,11,84,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4263660765446274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630810331188565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989040069525109,0.15250624298092266,0.222521997953748,0.0,0.0,0.10169484416044257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143610347175113,0.0,0.0,0.12375850210646833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155075823581885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15249079475009558,0.0,0.0,0.1161217936372231,0.0,0.1597587192691708,0.2813897909014374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12727529195698958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707739970182895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13951904615832353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545956369417179,0.0,0.0,0.09748518844665408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15985974925197574,0.11855279538188332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12870958850812236,0.12213274723394685,0.0,0.1587646510274271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708215228551048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656904480989086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784172043676103,0.11217208949345543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061347202212957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13748755958975567,0.0,0.0,0.14796449674153453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16292578833647509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30882897843298984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116757225680358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428938009272737,0.0,0.1696141578244457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200030128275161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033162146772238,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pason-NoDeterminaton,2020/03/11,Looking for others who cope by turning off their emotions I cope by going on auto pilot and i found someone in an AMA who had the same thing. It was nice to meet someone like me and i wanted to see how many others there are like me in my beautiful reddit family,3.375,4.5469744629629645,4.971296296296298,83.46583333333334,72.8888888888889,6.881481481481483,24.61111111111111,7.1686216300943375,1.1177555555555552,207,6,40,2,4,70,42,54,0.0,0.8009999999999999,0.19899999999999998,0.8934,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,6,9,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,7,3,9,6,1,5,0,0,2,0,4,4,0,0,2,32,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3268242178315852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739001350323585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185677900238115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651235197145695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838913949727511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439847730209617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945672066257235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315268890710773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4923559712622724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19302530537313345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31602972044583233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713710731701519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jesus_fuckingchrist9,2020/03/11,"PTSD? So a couple years back around February 2017 I found out my boyfriend of 2 years cheated on me with my sister. It was traumatic and caused me a lot of depression and anxiety. I cried for days and reverted to my eating disorders. Since then I’ve noticed a pattern. Started at the end of december to May I go through a lot of depression and anxiety. I got diagnosed in 2018 and was prescribed medication for 6 months. I weaned myself off of it because I felt so much better and was basically my version of normal. Next year same thing, new relationship and I’m completely like I was the 2 years prior. A mess. I hardly think about what happened but those few months I’m back on my prescription and it goes back to normal once again. This year, its more anxiety than depression and I have terrible trust issues. I’m shaking from the anxiety and i cant sleep at night. I wake up early and cant sleep. Eating disgusts me and I just want to stop. Me and my close friend (not boyfriend anymore) aren’t talking at all because I let him know how I was and said its best if we didnt talk at the moment. I have never had trust issues with him, but right now I’m paranoid and overthink for the majority of the day. I feel insane and I don’t want him to suffer if he’s doing absolutely nothing wrong. Is there a term for this or am I just jumping to conclusions and trying to come up with an explanation for my problems that only seem to arise at the same time of year every year?",2.7840644490644486,4.722430067567569,4.277702702702701,84.67083160083162,76.02702702702703,7.661954261954262,26.249480249480253,8.502166056373571,1.8749603950103948,1164,44,234,23,26,387,166,296,0.155,0.7390000000000001,0.106,-0.8846,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,0,0,3,13,17,2,1,14,0,18,7,3,2,2,55,36,26,0,7,8,1,3,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,11,25,2,1,7,0,0,4,7,11,0,0,11,4,34,6,41,23,12,48,0,4,0,0,11,15,0,7,30,163,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914570648204767,0.0,0.09446017178032227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479068905411505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197189158223785,0.0,0.11612428575175568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995663478121228,0.08423889252108474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784567397897766,0.0,0.08204750074057766,0.09986545118843164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053898210720223,0.10462517824271313,0.12285383509757887,0.0,0.2461102363053355,0.0966744588589174,0.0,0.0,0.10916217062097464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949244488305256,0.0,0.0,0.08436123333930888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025033534989882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816012305829774,0.0,0.09145277453200032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443423899676917,0.0735881735191322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05413148994306713,0.0,0.07617832479852531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422726863715634,0.0,0.08532327328028029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19882780469355452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05234567113405415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739727514754642,0.0,0.046533238325027176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16195245782603954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595208513002876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205168682656653,0.0,0.07001805382813901,0.0,0.07346093478213732,0.0919908681528945,0.10129706012871602,0.08938355885791308,0.18664513926159151,0.0913927826627258,0.1084401919339746,0.0,0.1014357426377704,0.0,0.07244020407338067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09113923095849298,0.11133951989147886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226043544185773,0.0,0.08134105602071377,0.09060241947694528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867099721546643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878992107310195,0.0,0.190633068757086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741684598473907,0.0,0.0,0.07963138190068123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531130631915496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06327837121340928,0.06103091072296806,0.0,0.0,0.05553972758435476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466696839019882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112359178630374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413845975249544,0.0,0.4293549864147769
mentalhealth,kanna172014,2020/03/11,"How can you recover from the trauma of a neighbor murdering her child? Early this morning around 2:30, my neighbor murdered her 3-year old son before trying to kill herself. I only found out at around 9 this morning. I wasn't really close to either of them but I saw the kid nearly every day. He was always playing with his friends at the playground in my apartment complex and he would sometimes show me his toys or some new move he learned or a drawing he made with sidewalk chalk. It just seems so horrifyingly surreal right now, like it didn't really happen, that it was just a dream and I'm having a difficult time really accepting the reality. I've never had to deal with someone I even vaguely know being murdered and I'm kind of traumatized by it. Learning the details of his murder didn't help either since she killed him very gruesomely.",5.8398588368153606,7.084899739130439,6.315697346132129,75.85114059853193,67.13664596273293,8.835911914172783,32.648785996612084,9.095868883498916,2.994622360248448,682,29,116,12,11,221,112,161,0.243,0.674,0.083,-0.9881,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,0,8,13,6,0,9,0,10,0,0,2,1,29,18,8,6,1,7,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,2,7,10,0,0,7,4,0,1,4,8,0,0,9,1,17,5,19,7,3,18,0,0,1,0,22,10,0,4,8,78,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470279739727091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145996816077923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15035809109766474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395643152907832,0.18216922105427505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670822218074248,0.0,0.14887678253141556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193741663759608,0.13651744205335248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625460879927466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11843781716528172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3909831939635469,0.18400513133969432,0.0971093150440698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632635330920567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16719715153378942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780339357307116,0.0,0.0,0.1362813945191638,0.17065728651677045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854161929513046,0.0,0.0,0.1343877812016851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3395942916449176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509002380522359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16086040776639984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14616748819956654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14971674478954766,0.0,0.1747601274190524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303478370997822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996722690337885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579542922385488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12552211406808866,0.0,0.0,0.1137885568818591
mentalhealth,Josephdassele,2020/03/11,"How I view myself in reflections is heavily distorted? I'm a male, and it's more common in women, but my ""view"" of my physical form, is not consistent. I can look younger, handsome, and fit, somewhat. Or I can look slouched, ugly, old, weird. Something out of a freak show. 

What is my problem? I seriously see different physical people. I've had girlfriends and women say im decent, enough to warrant their attention.  But some days I dread to leave my home, i look so damn horrid. 

I'd like to know what the hella wrong with me. I can't trust my own eyes.",2.0188573811509585,4.301179009174317,3.755279399499585,85.78828190158467,80.0091743119266,7.266388657214343,25.505421184320262,8.296473431620573,1.8523504587155968,428,17,85,9,11,143,78,109,0.316,0.602,0.08199999999999999,-0.9845,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,0,2,10,1,1,3,0,7,1,1,1,0,16,13,8,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,3,5,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,7,0,0,1,8,15,3,9,12,6,7,0,0,7,0,6,4,1,3,4,52,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071881916493146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244169436892172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24147721982834944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23442272525889116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524388712001637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284368165707504,0.0,0.0,0.24745726983769886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141752673280062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5887538793411833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452315264763867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620199310299189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236217902152366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18584965793641733,0.0,0.0,0.18623068484234387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17991565038579893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25551706499165155,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KLPDJK,2020/03/11,"Should I be concerned by how much I’m sleeping lately? Hi guys, this is my first post here. 

For the past couple months, I have had terrible insomnia caused by anxiety, paranoia, and delusions. When I did sleep, it was usually not for over 30-45 minutes at a time. I either had a night terror or sleep paralysis, which just made me want to stay up for the rest of the night out of fear that it would happen again. This is new; I usually sleep for 6-7 hours on school nights with sleep paralysis happening 2-3 times per month. 

I’ve been at my long-distance boyfriend’s house since Friday, and I’ve been sleeping excessively. For example, Monday night I slept from 4am (technically Tuesday morning) to 12am (technically this morning). 20 hours straight. Then I went back to sleep at 2am (this morning) and just woke up at noon. Last night wasn’t incredibly excessive (10 hours), but once it hits 4pm today, I will have slept for 30 hours out of 36. 

I’m concerned because I felt like going back to sleep as soon as I woke up today, and I very well could have. I’m just tired. Overwhelmingly so. 

Some background: I’m a 22 F in college on spring break. I have been diagnosed with MDD, GAD, BPD, and OCD, none of which seem to be relevant here. The paranoia and delusions are new, and I’ve spoken with my therapist about them.

My question is: is this amount of sleep alarming? What should I do to resist going back to sleep and how should I keep myself awake? Do you think the sudden change in sleeping habits has to do with the sudden change in environment? 

Thank you in advance. 🖤",3.2913368185212875,5.152940828478967,3.9382038834951447,87.9954163554892,74.37216828478964,7.213393079412497,25.476848394324122,8.012643519586192,1.3874474981329352,1232,42,253,19,26,390,172,309,0.069,0.889,0.042,-0.7023,0,0,0,0,0,0,52.0,0,2,1,2,16,8,0,4,9,0,29,16,13,4,0,37,50,17,0,6,7,0,1,1,0,5,3,0,0,1,12,14,0,1,4,0,0,4,3,5,1,1,15,1,23,3,45,26,6,60,0,1,0,0,6,17,0,4,37,151,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0514675175424056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15519798309163674,0.0,0.04101206960077716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473433799591865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911308113342024,0.14234249415646294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053716041614201404,0.07444187318850971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828579585522998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570650101257842,0.0,0.0,0.06459747037426015,0.0,0.0,0.057226667667521776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647132273036257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661583844984409,0.11898749968684084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650212746987585,0.07762982688226996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059799814458256426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054840583242350235,0.0758925611531746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03286865269535942,0.0,0.0,0.05953894954506469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366010951178998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074013815917475,0.0,0.04945710155839962,0.0,0.0,0.12995510328950755,0.0,0.31567942169155344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164891840041071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422450320969991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443376631725994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536680369965694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680889697258085,0.0,0.06124740212724671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055653091099265466,0.0,0.740592917046455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170944053132595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06194058145466162,0.0,0.07811499154958834,0.0,0.043109052377208544,0.0,0.0,0.07846073398176566,0.07732621161889977,0.12754343331293175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819451532016573,0.055511430102523775,0.03968233194670378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049103900947868,0.062367418431287076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04779239032736176,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,allurlov,2020/03/11,i think i hav bpd lit rully skipped school and spent all day reading up on it it do be sounding like me doe 😳😳😳 anyway it's the six month anniversary of my overdose tomorrow and a boy asked me out on monday and i said yes so now i'm facing the backlash of figuring out i'm not a lesbian and am actually bisexual so maybe i kinda wna die 🥳🥳🥳 but yeas yeehaw my mental health is spirllaing faster than i can keep up lololol also i'm relapsing into my ed i haven't eaten over 100 calories / day in a week i am so fucking mad i didn't die 🤣🤣🤣 i want deatth pls ... i literally sound fucking stupid in here okay leave me alone i'm a 15 y/o mentally ill kid all i hav to cope is stupid ass memes that make me unfunny yeah ..... anyway i'm sad,-1.4579525691699615,0.5296628727272754,2.011462450592888,93.41893280632416,96.03030303030305,5.2938076416337285,19.295125164690386,6.895973343053719,0.3740540184453232,574,20,136,10,23,207,109,165,0.235,0.706,0.06,-0.9872,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,8,8,5,0,6,4,9,8,2,1,2,17,24,9,2,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,2,4,7,1,1,2,1,1,0,3,6,0,1,4,4,18,2,14,19,2,18,0,1,1,4,4,10,3,1,9,68,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.1810653089922519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921688261909217,0.0,0.14838039581294038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17345967597006706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336876311784605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393225542776036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3851331603924011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16237181812813356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430670174629708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19722582646588116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16492106171095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19646553171078648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064799194838848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238528337433917,0.0,0.1864050501702024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37397175714400543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14810037490750375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855953691497991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649593466684346,0.0,0.0,0.18778160567410696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11888984525804965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943934149469854,0.0,0.14883313383214655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Corey_Huncho,2020/03/11,The daily battle with social anxiety is deteriorating my mental health How am I supposed to get through everyday life when I can’t hold down a conversation with anybody because I always think they’re negatively evaluating me and I have this eternal conflict inside of my head when I have to figure out what tone of voice I’m gonna use I’m never gonna get a girlfriend get a job or do anything without socializing I wish I could use of those rings from Sonic The Hedgehog and live in another world where I’ll spend the rest of my days alone,6.854890965732089,6.7189227289719655,7.686495327102808,71.71734423676014,64.70093457943925,10.12398753894081,34.65576323987539,9.725611199111238,3.259910903426791,440,18,81,8,6,148,78,107,0.113,0.887,0.0,-0.8342,1,1,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,6,0,7,3,1,3,1,17,18,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,2,2,2,0,0,3,5,0,2,2,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,2,11,0,14,15,1,11,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,6,51,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119947399913949,0.0,0.0,0.17031657433271385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21463291403759027,0.15658554012196765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16844054720228116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12477572994784975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16342648316860472,0.0,0.0,0.13200664143556562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208226454665111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100686458532369,0.2175734671953657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20312097123188588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14457698496383073,0.0,0.0,0.18074300055310805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062770715503642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786778279416008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4173066927624088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115562150573246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3535689285222777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23538076820092801,0.1973116509480848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WajeehaG,2020/03/11,"Anyone here who would like to share their experience with schizophrenia? Hi everyone, I'm new here. Im extremely anxious and its hard sometimes but im taking it one day at a time. On the other hand, I understand that people with disorders like schizophrenia have it a thousand times harder and theres a lot of stigma attached to it, especially where i come from. If anyone one here has it, firstly, God knows how strong you really are <3 Second, share your experience if you're willing. I want to write about it on my blog and it would really help.",4.8247857142857145,6.528304085714289,5.486845238095238,79.10169642857143,70.04761904761905,8.678571428571429,27.410714285714285,9.188382445141503,2.3395,439,15,80,9,8,142,74,105,0.025,0.741,0.23399999999999999,0.9732,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,1,2,7,5,0,0,4,0,6,1,1,1,0,17,12,7,0,5,3,0,2,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,2,7,5,11,9,1,10,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,3,7,56,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20519541504564676,0.0,0.254006292458915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564621380487204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713930060849274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20816900521321904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17355965869485498,0.0,0.3553470134173208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15449831098188208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270893863005334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174585393890185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3923931063502505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982163441059903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774749966287187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544192546085406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542384328888552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461606321294321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592257231469112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327195711562889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17964127891189016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365666259950966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21182520969085292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18908804021089812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071328020916304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25805603870780097,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sweetdayz,2020/03/11,"If all goes according to plan, my sibling will go to a mental hospital for a while. What can I do to make their stay better? I have a journal I'll give them, and I'm starting to write personal notes and writing prompts and stuff. Is there a ""care package"" of sorts I can start making? I want to go there with them, but I know that isn't possible. I want them to never feel alone during the stay.",2.979674796747968,3.976156073170735,4.130243902439022,89.79260162601628,73.6341463414634,7.417886178861789,25.861788617886177,7.793537801064563,1.2239691056910569,306,10,68,4,6,100,57,82,0.0,0.875,0.125,0.7286,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,4,2,2,2,0,0,5,0,7,0,0,2,2,17,20,6,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,11,2,9,19,1,8,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,2,4,45,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296420167112022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19609926888577728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260651723590577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211169376208743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21270047755251414,0.25202481380857017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218552088176381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960086199201995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22344838704030764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710093185144523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19360322293802734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24996356617962776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138786328389433,0.472662372061953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538240512469445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26156033303153714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GayAltAccountlol,2020/03/11,"Venting about a traumatic experience I have been eating at myself, and I want to let some of this out. There will be talk of sexual abuse and self harm, if this is triggering to you, you should skip this post and I hope that things are doing better for you now.

To set this up, let me give you some context. I am the middle of three. My older brother took up a lot of my parent’s attention because he was always the source of chaos in the house, stealing and screaming matches were common. My younger sister, she took up the rest of their time, I feel. I was unremarkably normal, as a child. I didn’t cause many problems for my parents, I didn’t do anything necessarily interesting either. I guess that might be why I feel like I was kind of forgotten about at some points. 

Growing up, my cousin was always around us. She is 4 years older than me I believe. Now, this cousin has always been weird towards me. I remember that she would try to make me “play marriage” with her. I remember her saying that Edgar Allen Poe married his cousin or something like that. It’s a little fuzzy to me now, at least that part.

I only ever really saw her at my grandparents house. Here’s the thing about that house. It has a big yard, to the left side of the yard, there is a big thick bush that you can’t really see through, or over. I’m going to cut to the chase here, she was molesting me behind that bush. For seven years I believe. This was going on from before I understood what it meant to be sexually stimulated, going through the beginning years of puberty. It did not make me feel good, it felt twisted and upsetting. I’m not even attracted to girls, I’m gay. 
I could have easily made her stop, I was stronger than her towards the later years. I was just scared, I felt powerless. Sometime after  this ended, my grandma from the other side of my family died. I remember she was at the funeral, of course she singled me out, and started rubbing on my arm. Let me put this into perspective for you. 

It’s a warm summer day. I’m at my grandmother’s funeral. The performance is pitiful. I’m surrounded by family I don’t know, and direct family that doesn’t treat me like I’m there. On top of this, I stood out compared to everyone else, I’m a very flamboyant person, this was in catholic coal miner territory of Pennsylvania. I’m getting stares from people I don’t know. Death doesn’t do anything to me. I don’t feel anything when people die, it doesn’t make me sad, it doesn’t make me cry. I’ve been told to have empathy. Suddenly a hand starts stroking my arm, I look over and it’s that monster that tormented me for years. I knew she would be here. I had to come to the funeral. I wanted to stay home for this reason, I didn’t want to go, only to feel scared and small again.  I was standing there, getting more and more upset, and I was trying and failing to hold back tears, of course it looked like I was grieving. I wasn’t.


I’m naturally a very anxious person. That’s what led me to self harm as a coping mechanism to my anxiety. Her presence gave me so much anxiety that it essentially made me go into hours of self destruction. I wasn’t careful during those times, I could have easily died, I would slice my arms apart so I could feel something. Those were the nights when my wounds would take the longest to heal afterwards. 


Being molested twisted relationships and sex for me. I have problems being intimate with people that I feel for. I don’t like being touched in specific areas. This is really hard for me because a lot of the guys I’ve been with have been really hands on. There have been nights where I’ve cried into my pillow to hide how I was falling apart, but I didn’t stop them. 

Sex is hard for me because of a fetish that I believe developed due to the sexual abuse I dealt with. These days I can’t get off, unless I imagine that I’m dead. Like i have to imagine that the person I’m with murdered me. The idea of being murdered by a stronger guy during sex is what has wormed itself into my brain. I know it isn’t normal to find the idea of being murdered arousing. I like to imagine that he was choking me during sex, then he pushed too hard, and I’m just non existent anymore. The idea of slowly growing cold, and just being touched or loved after I’m gone. This is why I have guys choke me during sex, because of the chance that I will die, or suffocate. 


I’m a lot of work to be with, and that makes me upset because even though I have a couple hang ups, like a fetish that has essentially fully warped how I view sex, and being molested. It makes it hard to deal with me. It’s so upsetting because I want to have a boyfriend my own age, and just be able to be comfortable with him. I don’t want to feel like I’m fucking ripping myself apart from the inside anymore.


I’m not even twenty yet. I had to grow up fast and start taking care of myself, then what should be something that is supposed to be a bonding experience between lovers, got twisted by someone older than me, against my will. 

I recently came out to my parents and I feel like they don’t see me the same anymore. Things had been good since my brother moved out. They finally started paying attention to me, other than passing conversations. Now I’ll just see them looking at me from the corner of their eyes, it feels different now.


I’ve been suicidal since I can remember really, I don’t really see myself long on this planet. I know I need therapy, or medication, I just know I need help. I need it. I don’t want it, I want to die, I want to kill myself. 

I’ve tried to kill myself 3 times, and I’m still here somehow. I don’t want to upset my sister because I know she looks up to me. 


I know that I’m hard to deal with, I’m especially hard to be with because of my past. I can be a pain. My sexual life is fucked, my emotions are fucked. I still want to be with someone though. I want to love someone, i want to be loved. I miss being with someone that cared about me. I miss the tight feeling my chest would get around him, and how he would always make me laugh. It’s been so long since I’ve been embraced by someone I’ve really loved. I miss him. I miss being warm.

Maybe I can stick around for a little while longer. I know that with professional help I can get better. I can find a guy that I can rule my own life with. I just hope he’ll be patient with me.

I’m sorry that this is all over the place, I know that I will get upset again eventually and be depressed even more. I will still keep at this though, I think I’m going to start by getting some medication for my anxiety. Maybe that will help me curb stomp my self harm problems. I’ll look into therapy so I can get professional help with my trauma.


Just ignore how rapid the tone shifted. It’s been a long morning, I’ve been up for like 25 hours. I’m gonna take a nap. When I wake up I’m gonna get started with my long road to getting better.",2.7365341007123334,4.386924989992856,4.1018118237164485,87.13542262330239,75.36883488205861,7.2544452934361985,24.35484089620665,8.019286293256997,1.2775153878386036,5387,172,1127,85,116,1777,447,1399,0.158,0.736,0.106,-0.9977,6,0,3,0,2,3,166.0,1,6,6,7,60,77,13,8,53,0,139,34,10,18,2,186,279,51,17,34,20,10,29,11,1,18,8,2,4,13,79,55,1,7,41,4,1,21,25,42,0,2,55,45,194,35,175,176,20,153,0,9,13,16,78,65,3,18,74,750,273,5,0.03462113210175149,0.08204076050231829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152302213988983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945521388690248,0.03911202476151979,0.10300458020768156,0.0,0.0,0.08547072542432388,0.09246044303043063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026621513551299103,0.0,0.16883776629997904,0.0,0.029460033451721906,0.1170184805481231,0.0,0.09185873366262402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038648633321385385,0.0,0.0395973519495741,0.10589565466570693,0.035565439498250716,0.0,0.029823039741119724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292647050826922,0.038307624166131184,0.0760593758613055,0.044655532141663984,0.07138573397619327,0.02981913034839673,0.0,0.17965634574890715,0.03617171431398581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035426061315196225,0.028921513384373345,0.03894411373748558,0.030664046945720162,0.0,0.0,0.09146772493413399,0.031316796083253474,0.0,0.03308197537924523,0.0,0.06773222093982266,0.09791316643104003,0.0,0.19256033103199066,0.0989333747644822,0.0664834322724138,0.03792575794990096,0.06328617505261823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602003625173676,0.18088112588633695,0.03321174462373943,0.11805592330636648,0.05807712603692442,0.027689682042377727,0.0,0.03813908023102526,0.1371214556294765,0.0,0.0,0.18608240447878166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282326026264144,0.0,0.034727818332624595,0.06877319192867838,0.06818968244848041,0.11984441436974105,0.0,0.11724913213258326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030772852956967956,0.07660630624623606,0.036052581440627694,0.17124181904068325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03761596132861835,0.10620735968251746,0.04890785894396503,0.1860555000038337,0.06939893932740711,0.0,0.122554449786233,0.14536515705270142,0.0,0.0,0.08830094534852719,0.1249876936842978,0.06551870459726199,0.16176912160791024,0.035100393949621625,0.0695631611852886,0.0,0.0,0.06975429652937418,0.0,0.036727550027819314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03679678437401696,0.02545051565330286,0.07701339231203025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497917435537202,0.06784271739471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052661862102688216,0.036839325527571305,0.0,0.11532801019272684,0.0374913122615027,0.033049788053874776,0.07200580137686101,0.0906895114557958,0.03617171431398581,0.0,0.03272816037499629,0.0,0.033157474388633534,0.0,0.0,0.0993832432060656,0.0,0.03480380018311107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525428624394835,0.03559628994200957,0.03418419122598186,0.037170139280287104,0.15687597473971698,0.0,0.0,0.02753211383780521,0.0693235858783617,0.0,0.11035423948804876,0.0,0.14446956548190598,0.0,0.0,0.08591687471842897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14667186439996935,0.07995911678222055,0.03424118490868781,0.038755522914077634,0.1470300929736522,0.03690152033226345,0.0829454424551947,0.05788963333747923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03786989928219372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809234806239519,0.027827154558212143,0.0,0.0,0.07918456363986799,0.0,0.06900222538469772,0.022183823510758552,0.10204525952664596,0.0,0.06056358163290156,0.0,0.0,0.03308197537924523,0.0769307032834016,0.07051642831887635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04164495913084474,0.0,0.0,0.05713211960443181,0.24504528859458505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06248037349841911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025204596505768333,0.0,0.0,0.14756315349766408,0.0,0.0,0.11147436987562266
mentalhealth,GtrzBitcHsUseJimmies,2020/03/11,"Medication hasn’t worked well for me Just wanted to post this to see if anyone else has had a similar situation. I’ve been to a few different mental health doctors, and tried a handful of different medications, but my overall view on life hasn’t changed a ton. I feel like medication may just not be for me. I am an overall pretty anxious person, and I have solid bouts of depression, but I think the issue really falls on my overall outlook on life. I find it very difficult to change my thought patterns, and this makes it very difficult to get out of these negative spaces.

How effective has therapy been for those of you that have tried it for an extended period of time? I’ve briefly tried it before I started taking medication, but didn’t stay in it for long to notice lasting effects. 

Just looking for different points of view on the subject. Thanks in advance!",7.641172086720863,7.493165054878053,8.065447154471542,69.69310298102981,63.085365853658544,11.679132791327914,38.344173441734405,11.20814326018867,4.492731165311653,695,33,121,18,9,230,99,164,0.114,0.778,0.107,-0.5058,3,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,4,5,6,0,0,8,0,13,9,1,4,0,22,24,8,0,2,8,0,2,1,0,1,8,0,0,1,10,4,0,0,6,0,0,2,5,3,1,0,5,6,12,3,25,17,2,18,0,1,4,0,2,9,0,2,6,84,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369815862324092,0.0,0.08478304655660868,0.12423821755107235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317753011465153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565395852542112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044351909700427,0.0,0.0,0.3800513141689971,0.0,0.12410777326447213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129147759005902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06130925382348725,0.08662329992627553,0.0,0.0,0.11082321483160046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334978486665223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888646609851098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655682306259822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09883752960396468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712894215583159,0.0592381816849692,0.0,0.0,0.10730525352445357,0.10182213739848628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093744284668353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4885993115099587,0.12219469189872995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804755531666446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587360459776277,0.0,0.0,0.11462345276091172,0.0,0.1161270342026398,0.123358080928575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767789547642424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096623090115603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13629366077598806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582362876137158,0.12923976245980806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911673053272414,0.0,0.0,0.11163364230021887,0.13866358490320194,0.0,0.0,0.07769414525921467,0.0,0.09626148514979344,0.07070370753900848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24696886099507376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20009315334486136,0.07151827035106863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090211756584102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827376313958507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnDyDeVoN,2020/03/11,"Music is helping, slowly, but it's painful I'm 42M, I have been is such a low place for so long that I stopped playing guitar. I couldn't play songs without being completely overwhelmed with emotion and breaking down. I have felt unworthy, unwanted, insignificant and worthless. My wife is alcoholic with a personality disorder, trauma related ptsd and aspergers. About a month ago I tried to kill myself, I was going to throw myself off of a cliff. Fortunately I was also hampered by a partially dislocated hip, I couldn't get to the cliff. I had a breakdown and ended up at my brothers flat for days. I had time to reflect and came to the realisation that I do matter to some people. I have picked up my guitar again and I am playing through the pain. Its good to have an outlet, but I just wish my wife could see what she's doing to me. Even when I tell her, she spins it around and makes me feel bad for making her feel bad. I'm stuck in an abusive relationship with someone that is totally self absorbed. I love my wife dearly and she needs me to care for her, which I do, but at the cost of my own mental health. I'm just not sure how much longer I can afford to be a secondary thought in the lives of those I love.",3.8789253187613855,5.150367803278686,5.026994535519126,83.16545537340622,71.78688524590163,7.881238615664843,27.899817850637522,8.344100000000001,1.8415708561020032,960,35,194,15,18,317,145,244,0.231,0.645,0.124,-0.9851,1,0,1,0,0,1,26.0,0,0,0,0,11,18,1,1,14,0,23,7,1,4,2,40,42,15,1,6,7,4,3,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,9,13,1,1,5,6,1,3,4,9,0,0,9,5,36,9,33,28,4,24,0,3,1,2,17,11,0,1,9,140,45,0,0.0,0.1690834528891385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650039204357766,0.15250947519903416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412205701614993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12703872942769648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23830734969617626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321781884777278,0.14549843132611764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962468372683055,0.0,0.0,0.11393924908867918,0.0,0.0,0.09203366130304327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355361198217558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16052521161734778,0.12639529193517154,0.0,0.0,0.0942560665276884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431303509051327,0.0,0.13702028381639947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455807366991084,0.0,0.0811031940076165,0.11969514841251845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168996476712224,0.0,0.0,0.09565292458003896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578832118801526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260121454110324,0.12629045251353602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25759574493697995,0.0,0.1905149272130789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381423488390485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390668785258305,0.0,0.10490544061565386,0.1058148023908672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30369881137963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893447639363853,0.12460550620518873,0.1490975538422848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668158532486505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321299937738986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11371832574045275,0.0,0.14887363805205034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091445824046715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193087317969289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344988580114442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473146558663213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329274308477387,0.08321310398331275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968881087284096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641050303399193,0.13756363662478424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sonicc_m,2020/03/11,"25F Struggling with just living Anybody ever just feel like they’re not meant for this life? Like no matter what you do, you don’t succeed at it the way others do. Like why can’t I be less socially awkward and be able to make more friends or have a social life? Or why can’t I be less socially awkward and have good, fun relationships with people at work the way a lot of my coworkers do where they joke around and talk so casually like it all just comes so naturally to them. But when I try to, I get nervous and have a serious face and don’t have much to say after a couple sentences. Sometimes if I just click really well with someone then the conversation is better and I learn to get over the awkwardness but it takes me some time to get there. 
Or why can’t I have that motivation and self-discipline to never miss a day of work and be really good at my job? I do social work so I deal with uncomfortable phone calls and demanding people, this does not go well my social anxiety and non confrontational personality so I struggle and it becomes overwhelming sometimes. 
Or like why can’t I just be happy with my relationship with my bf and not overthink everything and always find something wrong? I’ve learned to not be as impulsive and go straight to wanting to break up but I still have these thoughts to myself. My bf is actually pretty great and I love him, I just have all these issues going on in my head.
I feel like I’m a failure at dealing with the same problems a lot of people deal with on a daily basis, like work stress, motivation, and keeping a social life. I feel like I’m a lazy person for not putting in more effort to be better. I just can’t help but feel like this is why I’m not meant for this life. I can’t find just enough motivation to be even slightly better.",4.679250232126278,5.478565637883012,5.659348885793872,81.13028609563607,69.50139275766017,8.768848653667595,28.32880687093779,8.959647251330699,2.0934985143918285,1420,48,287,25,24,469,164,359,0.109,0.659,0.23199999999999998,0.9936,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,2,12,21,37,1,8,15,0,30,7,2,4,4,76,53,32,0,3,23,0,4,9,3,0,4,1,0,2,13,26,0,1,14,2,0,5,16,13,2,0,3,6,32,24,40,42,12,29,0,2,1,1,28,13,0,8,17,196,45,11,0.0707680187943571,0.0,0.06905937793385411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588846607446917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054137340677097766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06299854041823852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07815771679750556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18776568516468448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226205952787562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06096038196271601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830346676672632,0.0,0.04563951763023688,0.21887615989111384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619295701442049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731222808984217,0.0,0.04674160898459191,0.06401372454503335,0.0,0.0,0.06360173214417437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312974657390234,0.20222674706722987,0.0,0.0,0.1293613742145678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05467519577285955,0.0,0.11092010693337076,0.0,0.12065728779139873,0.11871371319759323,0.0,0.07802199055383194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533387193255553,0.0,0.0,0.07262840385692684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0474343112720438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738634255128077,0.07022633896896381,0.06290186669847586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999421781336368,0.3111631141699785,0.0,0.06248945712562469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032887778132363,0.06387089992983115,0.0,0.0472382020679052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05202263648645677,0.0,0.05458065880418105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14718490112235966,0.12358380872299933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199651667586385,0.0,0.0677154365564994,0.0,0.07114140514627626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067160991670256,0.0,0.0,0.15195673598687165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05627756896556276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382647753392575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4328344988045684,0.05996151267355765,0.05448067828047822,0.13998276024234846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05651543122395013,0.0,0.08106452642875896,0.14796419725614315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05320874294475075,0.056880652861996124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056181902058311986,0.04126540086032148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04804683942661248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04174081102105495,0.112344718677649,0.0,0.0,0.12725789558703834,0.0,0.3192856485035974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20607984210131172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773737192019233,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Okk2000,2020/03/11,How to get out of a depressive mindset There are to many details to go through to explain. Short and simple. Broke up with my first boyfriend I have ever had we were together for 10 months and he put himself and all his friends first and never thought of me. I'm in college was sick with the flu missed so much that I'm now failing. Cant catch up because now spring break and feel like a failure. I feel so depressed and have so much anxiety. I cant sleep at night and then when I do sleep. I do nothing but sleep. I'm just so lost in my own mind. My head is so full of stuff cant shut it off either. Sorry for being all over the place.,-0.002352941176472001,2.162502,1.4338235294117645,99.92220588235297,87.8235294117647,4.282352941176471,21.0,5.602791699666715,-0.21887352941176494,496,17,117,3,16,158,91,136,0.16699999999999998,0.805,0.027999999999999997,-0.9322,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,4,12,8,0,0,4,0,13,6,4,1,4,24,24,16,0,0,3,0,2,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,11,0,0,4,0,0,3,4,6,0,2,5,2,12,2,20,18,7,27,0,6,0,0,6,12,0,0,12,83,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043627031060107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393859373607008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29371234104940275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423202126137284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724254468367266,0.1218091908218423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29006384800687696,0.0,0.0,0.13173215614062664,0.0,0.08908210654537786,0.0,0.096902226870068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749878734201886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330039357707053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18612693691062493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17286585420580453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721619882887069,0.0,0.13609589416752746,0.0,0.2506823789328908,0.0,0.1315043826769384,0.0,0.0,0.16000789758444262,0.0,0.1636046628161308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17814199754994167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17140516020694085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5118860268874507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908669909332137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951880485680556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536235196978927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MarvellousG,2020/03/11,"Wondering if anyone can help/has any ideas Hi!! I've been inspired to make this post because today ha's been another repeat of the exact same scenario which has happened for weeks now. 

I started a new role about two months ago which on a superficial level is mostly good, definitely better than my old one - everyone's really nice and the team is great and on paper my role is what I want to do. 

But since starting this job my mental health during the working day (and a lot of the time out of it) has absolutely plummeted to almost zero, in terms of anxiety and general misery, which is no fun!! I just find myself constantly on absolute edge about everything that happens, dreading every day before I go in and every bit of each day yet to come once i'm in, and I can't stop worrying about everything. This is silly because my old job was much more actually stressful but for some reason this has gotten really bad here.

I've sought help from the NHS and done some online CBT and am actually seeing a therapist for the first time ever next week, but I wondered if anyone had any experience of anything similar they could help me out by mentioning, or if there were any 'quick wins' I could do beyond the obvious of deep breaths, better sleep, less caffeine etc? I dunno if this is the right place to post but today was just the same as ever and my random/unwarranted misery is such that I wanted to get it off my chest!",7.6596428571428605,6.70778352536232,8.216687370600415,71.26630434782612,63.38405797101449,11.363975155279505,33.12008281573499,10.608840637214634,3.4019169772256728,1127,37,206,24,14,377,168,276,0.069,0.804,0.127,0.9169,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,6,14,13,0,2,13,1,24,4,3,2,4,49,39,19,0,8,11,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,13,13,0,1,6,1,0,2,2,3,0,4,8,1,18,10,33,29,13,45,0,0,1,0,8,14,0,13,27,145,31,5,0.0,0.0,0.19134806653027528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.086907576247227,0.0,0.09817406353328233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20001406008514705,0.10280470861540393,0.07500122195985842,0.0,0.0,0.13710532260519998,0.0,0.0806795241624355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186027659448072,0.11952996693989293,0.0,0.08342580932457871,0.0,0.0,0.17341888430855162,0.1070355584355444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084453781459524,0.0,0.10594766831096154,0.0,0.15655578323132802,0.0,0.0,0.18968531973206104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033014973687117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934181365308028,0.0,0.17736769124717428,0.16520781797176656,0.09368253347682497,0.17622615259322005,0.09590307082501992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960784755173193,0.0833937638476247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05122246158796085,0.0,0.05571905274951615,0.08223227666757436,0.0,0.10809072921000433,0.0,0.0,0.17339495473253433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421317251251276,0.0,0.0,0.19714477643704745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067654032363296,0.0,0.0,0.19458145415213146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335109148125908,0.0,0.0,0.06544323814151434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880243358695677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825552158136598,0.0,0.07207153615708302,0.0,0.0,0.0946887669353978,0.10426788995867484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20575541822750745,0.1044106397341856,0.066435229919087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243214917752703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877926676874878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256153600410812,0.1008026451236408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372661820109323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812611411979532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110066382838667,0.0,0.0981119679603296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387880807116333,0.0,0.0,0.08196680293314534,0.11230582189136257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138333476988854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433718208093632,0.0,0.18586311926826388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577197109856866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565443714153545,0.0,0.15728541570401874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21264291997953136,0.07137513491418901,0.09956556087465533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,syddo19,2020/03/11,"There's nothing wrong except my feelings My life is awesome, I live with my amazing boyfriend, I see my wonderful parents often, I have hobbies and a few friends. Nothing is wrong, and so when asked what's wrong I really truly don't know. I have no idea why I'm crying in bed at night with his arms around me, no fucking clue why I dread waking up, absolutely no reason to be wanting to die, yet here I am. It doesn't feel fair that it hurts so much to be alive.",2.2815625,3.844279031250004,3.59416666666667,90.6675,76.39583333333334,6.0500000000000025,25.541666666666664,6.6274283507984215,0.8355666666666663,361,13,78,3,8,118,69,96,0.133,0.573,0.294,0.9476,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,8,8,1,1,1,0,9,4,2,1,0,14,18,5,1,1,1,1,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,6,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,0,3,13,2,10,16,2,7,0,1,1,1,4,4,1,2,3,51,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177072357745178,0.15938353677655778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18727338088008846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769399282282381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17240800388995622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317188298188472,0.15761367674890933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18251124040049047,0.19246052732771046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369590544419763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042092105442102,0.0,0.0,0.15054428342235854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532850966925704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999171082493807,0.0,0.32717622439949995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18930706994273386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092191640761125,0.17529035674402393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585709381222852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055841054916166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3076783276538129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18488727779208453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5592065437323104,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AdamnOthello,2020/03/11,"I’m gunna cry I can’t take it, I literally woke up with half my brain today- couldn’t for the life of me find any of my boys stuff OR remember what time his school bus comes- sent him to school with my coat and money on inside pocket -😭😭😢  I feel like complete shit- my mind is going bad and that’s the only thing I have",-1.672272727272727,0.25839561111111564,0.8932828282828318,100.31636363636363,99.83333333333334,3.7292929292929298,10.712121212121213,5.565023196281405,-1.5185166666666667,252,3,62,2,11,85,58,72,0.14400000000000002,0.82,0.035,-0.8271,0,0,0,1,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,4,3,2,0,0,11,11,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,0,1,3,2,2,0,1,2,1,11,1,8,8,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,1,3,34,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320112294481342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881030707567558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514919056394855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19406256966675728,0.236206415839946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474643439270769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391056585271807,0.160943226271197,0.0,0.0,0.20590586777372888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803432089244007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591250400018546,0.11006258231829752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274730309716497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17133894418202575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255203317981963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4559996970288299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312512076496359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578967486293235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16938583801708545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14966895043919295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13136515014260605,0.0,0.21354327721112776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,5FeetOver,2020/03/11,"I'm devestated I just got out of a meeting with my psychiatric and she deemed me perfectly healthy. No ADHD like i suspected, no mental health disorder. No change in my life. The past 3 years have been horrible, everyday i struggle to wake up as I just don't wanna be awake. I feel like I'm not normal, I can do anything properly and all i wanna do when I'm awake is drink. I don't know whats wrong with me, but I was hoping i would fint out what it was after going to the psychiatrist for 3 months. Apparently not. I can relate to all the ADHD and anexiety symptoms, but no. I'm at the end of the road and all i wanna do is drink till i never wake up. The only thing stopping me from taking my life is that I don't wanna hurt my family, especially my dad and sister. I'm not writing this to get help, because apparently there isn't anything wrong with me. I just wanted to get my thoughts out in the open.

Thank you for reading.",1.9019648271679843,3.610474690721652,4.24924802910855,84.92319284414799,77.8659793814433,7.451303820497272,23.78289872650091,8.313332769828598,1.4382016979987868,726,24,154,14,17,253,103,194,0.087,0.77,0.14300000000000002,0.9263,2,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,1,5,9,0,1,8,0,18,8,2,0,5,39,34,10,0,8,8,2,1,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,6,12,2,1,4,3,0,1,12,4,0,0,5,1,27,5,28,27,3,21,0,1,0,0,7,10,0,1,12,110,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636413450401429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24899686367830084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222472242053033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600443130523824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733909632970939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964123794413347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339976608235667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14262234954192984,0.0,0.0764965562894399,0.10808130462434104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580851203287448,0.0,0.08598135354530896,0.0,0.12100009594933125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16081374660401854,0.0,0.0,0.10140621496592037,0.0,0.0,0.1502646872104942,0.0,0.0,0.16195862210275214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314479540609829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137206059585348,0.14782489158308149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246431075501027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075789762988053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668384912210952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14823166444561967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11506254130227185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14442302080260766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513305189292656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264848613571349,0.0,0.15816071522745434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15724779910066292,0.11375093430104966,0.0,0.0,0.13928711686167058,0.0,0.0,0.10051007302392324,0.0,0.0,0.12010702557996675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923451277656927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747177537392684,0.3308228070226992,0.0,0.09742552789301244
mentalhealth,fanlight_floating,2020/03/11,"I have an incredibly difficult time leaving my house, and feel intense anxiety about anything in my life changing Hi. I'm sorry if this post doesn't seem to serve a purpose at this point I really don't know why I'm writing it but I really want to hear from someone who might know what exactly it is I'm dealing with. 

I'm currently 25 years old. When I was 4 I was diagnosed with acute lymphoblastic leukemia, and suffered through it until I entered remission when I was 8. It was horrific for everyone in my family except me, really, as I didn't know any better and saw the constant hospital stays and doctor visits as just being what I had to do. For a long time growing up after entering remission, I saw it as a good thing that I got it when I did because of that--I didn't know any better and it would have been worse were I an adult. 

Throughout my sickness I was homeschooled. My only social interaction for the first 8 years of my life was with my parents and doctors. When I was well enough to go to public school and actually interact with kids my age, I loved it. I felt like I got along with everyone and had a lot of friends.

But I didn't. With every year that went by as I grew up, I realized more and more that I was actually really awkward. I said the wrong things. I embarrassed myself constantly. I felt an immense amount of empathy for the other kids to the point where all of my social interaction became ""how do I act to have this person not hate me and think I'm an embarrassing, annoying person."" This realization was a snowball effect that carried on and has carried on for literally my entire life. Every year I went up in school I became more and more withdrawn and afraid to talk to people, culminating in my senior year of high school having two friends that I could speak to without overthinking every single word and thought. They would invite me to go places and I'd turn them down almost as a rule because of my fear of embarrassment and not knowing what to say when others were present, and my behavior and refusal to do a lot of things ended up forcing us to drift apart.

While this was going on I retreated into my bedroom and the computer/internet, playing video games and meeting new people that way, which I figure was easier for me because of the anonymity and the thought that everyone I was talking to has a shared interest in the game/games in general. I spent years and years telling myself that eventually I'd get over this mindset and fearfulness, that it was just a part/phase of being young and eventually I would ""wake up"" one day and be able to function as a  human being with a drive to go out into the world, find a job, make money, and be normal.

But that day still hasn't come. I'm 25 years old and still living with my mom, cramped in a tiny bedroom and spending most of my time online and playing video games. I'm lucky to have a small group of friends that I can comfortably spend time with and a long distance SO, but I just don't know if I'm ever going to be able to course correct myself. I struggle with the thoughts that I'm just lazy and need to force myself to get out there, but going to any public space other than the grocery store or restaurant within walking distance of my house fills me with a dread and my mind instantly shuts down the idea as being something that I won't enjoy and dangerous on top of it.

I think the problem is that I'm actually happy with living the way I do, but I know I can't live like this forever and thus the cycle repeats itself of me hating the way I feel. I'm ashamed of living the way I do when my friends and SO are working and have no problem going out places. I'm ashamed that I'm complacent and don't want things to change, but it's an impossibility.

Money is extremely tight at the moment. My mom doesn't work and receives money from my father's (who passed away in 2018, which was its own hell) retirement. At this point all I'm doing is waiting for my SO to reach a more stable living situation and planning on moving in with them, but that won't fix any of my motivational issues. I'm scared of being a leech and driving them away. I'm terrified that even if I get a job it wouldn't be enough to pull my own weight in the relationship. These are concerns I've voiced to them, and they've assured me it isn't the case, but I literally cannot stop thinking them whenever the subject comes up; like everything else it's easy to just avoid it and distract myself with a game or TV show.

 Adding onto my fears that I'm just lazy and there's nothing wrong with me, most of the people my mom's side of the family have varying degrees of depression and suffered from panic attacks before they got medicated. I've seen one of these attacks, and have never experienced anything that severe. The only thing I can compare it to is that sometimes I'll feel a general malaise and become overwhelmed by emotion and fear for my future which usually causes me to sob for 10-20 minutes, but these are pretty few and far between. For the most part, when I'm not thinking about my problems, I'm pretty optimistic. 

This was so long, and I still don't know what I'm trying to accomplish by writing it, but it's my first time really trying to jot these thoughts down and I would really appreciate you sharing any thoughts that come to your mind about this. I really don't know what to do or what I'm looking for here, but I felt the urge to post it.",8.612240015360982,6.285027637788018,8.701569700460832,72.93711645545315,62.483870967741936,11.769777265745013,37.35071044546851,10.222266870305534,3.5900848694316436,4317,160,845,74,48,1423,408,1085,0.133,0.76,0.10800000000000001,-0.9868,4,1,1,0,0,0,85.0,1,2,7,11,31,57,7,18,53,0,80,12,1,6,7,178,160,89,0,16,29,5,8,3,4,8,9,5,2,6,75,74,1,5,31,9,7,27,23,35,1,5,42,18,104,22,145,100,20,137,1,5,4,1,57,52,2,15,54,583,179,12,0.09016726271814088,0.0,0.1319853624433328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04514474448905181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329207653880786,0.0,0.03448885459036338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741999744683413,0.0,0.0,0.10257827831057137,0.08471511144847907,0.0,0.0,0.08244768967605548,0.049791328795067764,0.03836284972021819,0.0,0.0,0.07974561650931238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04631330826357759,0.09538500820341764,0.11650666931491213,0.0,0.09743877849138184,0.0,0.035995611151746064,0.0,0.0,0.05815042510166936,0.046479244315591764,0.03883046562787521,0.045758936826471766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922900141060803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03766158899528147,0.050713017188068435,0.0399307158534004,0.0931668856164646,0.0,0.029777313318812126,0.040780725650885176,0.11395471158327986,0.12923802534050732,0.040518260856201034,0.0,0.08500167060978348,0.20292647709823666,0.06838691588010294,0.0,0.1298620684866453,0.0,0.04120562230334315,0.07669622760608312,0.0,0.0,0.13932600701293946,0.0,0.07066300988055224,0.0,0.1793544665783648,0.037814011005586255,0.1081724953978564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04799236390844918,0.0,0.0890215045481054,0.0,0.0,0.0508125291201959,0.0,0.0,0.04763333179398053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404091508830722,0.0,0.05089393220592098,0.0,0.04705559804371846,0.08947709521087634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229910628051429,0.0,0.0,0.04773705604677676,0.0,0.0,0.09553170633086784,0.06607675505958094,0.0,0.19904836230237544,0.11969278516090293,0.03785889573891678,0.0,0.0,0.0766569823511352,0.040689737484048284,0.0,0.030093674012314338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045417015555688584,0.0,0.04782660836478701,0.09104323154806547,0.15840421249551928,0.0,0.047916765316679495,0.0,0.033428941400132035,0.03477127582182804,0.043542052100478984,0.0,0.0,0.044172386570599284,0.043258960201289776,0.0,0.09461537445651108,0.0,0.061099670764912836,0.06857626638961607,0.0,0.052895927588844205,0.050060037336185,0.09764235878813887,0.0,0.09376594027740126,0.07873057589202773,0.09420559841686102,0.0,0.12785581185534572,0.0,0.08635531315045293,0.09173252190043316,0.0,0.12941683959966266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20217210076685127,0.0,0.0,0.0484029480016048,0.0,0.0,0.04288485747017567,0.03585231318119656,0.045136579893509735,0.1368811255067561,0.0,0.04104244476652085,0.0,0.0509316708902765,0.0,0.0,0.05067589057770193,0.0,0.09191416930999896,0.03819921454862685,0.03470758200715727,0.04458886419958956,0.050467434255215785,0.0,0.04805315246074359,0.10801153872076323,0.037691934527563226,0.0,0.047131200202319735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247303029763405,0.03940508094931707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975780702646954,0.11555108231057785,0.0,0.17895683704305612,0.13144313999216733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0612176526510467,0.04903804482802647,0.04404015692996123,0.0,0.05423005752384325,0.0,0.04965325057455339,0.0,0.05318298770438151,0.14314115241009034,0.0,0.054899717394345286,0.040535598918268655,0.08358595588686604,0.040680964991281404,0.0,0.0,0.04345901181700712,0.0,0.06564284114572258,0.0,0.0459440719572735,0.12810447281963291,0.09858374708825084,0.0,0.23225904376260376
mentalhealth,ryleec12,2020/03/11,"i don’t feel like my mental illness is valid. i’ve always had issues with my mental health. (i’m 17f) specifically with anxiety, even since i was a little kid i would have at least mild anxiety symptoms. in middle school i remembered it taking a large dip and my anxiety got really really bad. that’s when dissociation started happening. but it would only be for a small period of time (a few seconds, honestly) and every couple months. and then when i reached high school it would become every month and for longer. and then in november of last year (nov 2019) it suddenly took a large drop. i was taking a trip across country and the entire three day trip i couldn’t stop dissociating. there was only abt a five minute period of one day where i didn’t dissociate. (i get nervous on planes and i think my anxiety set it off? i don’t know. i have a problem with breaking routine, it really sets off my anxiety, and i think bc i missed school for this trip and was worried about catching up i had a hard time. i honestly don’t know.) 
since that trip there is little time where i’m not disconnected from reality. i went to therapy and the therapist also diagnosed me as depressed (as well as my other various issues lol), which i didn’t think i was. but i’m pretty sure that comes from the fact that this year my i never see my best friends because they’re all in a very advanced program at my school where they all take the same classes, and i’m just in honors/ap. 

and idk if you’ve noticed, but i feel like i have a reason for each of my issues. which makes the title make no sense. (“i don’t feel like my mental illness is valid.”). 
dissociation comes from trauma. everything i read says that. i had a great childhood and a great middle school life and aside from the mental stuff, my high school life is good too. i don’t have any traumatic events in my life. the most sad thing that happened to me is that all my four siblings left my household abt the same time (they’re all ~10 years older than me) and i guess that could have made me lonely? i don’t know. it’s not traumatic. 
i feel like i should be okay and that im probably just overreacting. i don’t know.",3.2761507936507925,4.9403809537037064,4.520010582010581,84.64033333333334,73.9537037037037,7.9001058201058205,24.1484126984127,8.591530228387361,1.5266423809523806,1700,51,347,32,35,560,200,432,0.156,0.73,0.114,-0.9293,0,2,0,0,0,0,54.0,0,0,1,2,14,22,0,1,21,2,35,8,0,4,7,65,68,28,0,8,8,0,5,4,1,4,8,1,0,1,23,22,0,1,13,1,0,10,14,8,1,5,14,7,51,14,34,46,12,62,0,4,1,0,4,23,0,3,29,220,74,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05598159283579348,0.05824833171917295,0.0,0.0,0.047604626757576415,0.0,0.2677615645801048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844980965678034,0.04267334601450052,0.07731311613007265,0.0,0.0,0.0734641170854175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206032438800072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589191798037641,0.07745729107220299,0.0,0.0902926408612698,0.0,0.060293717221904984,0.07105184943777028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0462365021856362,0.0,0.11796155493216147,0.0,0.06291442873230484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415830345608196,0.20004141140820228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408435575431828,0.0,0.0365738213272775,0.0,0.0,0.05871542485342015,0.05598801304805146,0.154357713186943,0.07711649842520046,0.0,0.12380732781748265,0.0,0.06270918335829917,0.0,0.0,0.07441020664101047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479246046156976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561554841986243,0.21919569154887067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15388787433767084,0.05706201143025184,0.0,0.0,0.07605876190483105,0.0,0.14833614776703874,0.1368002544765933,0.14032334190899035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623879036004883,0.09345545780754824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28218734052866234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175189069251942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05399084038645048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969919129870531,0.0,0.0,0.04743603008466851,0.10648128851850157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121849617412856,0.07547536921004916,0.06698367896102989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700222177669021,0.0,0.13453766936448688,0.07197502458443968,0.0,0.0,0.07930006299107048,0.0,0.0,0.055669413120466055,0.0,0.42508230281924864,0.055783545933362017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581486310607797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04954867756195548,0.0,0.0,0.0585258715084795,0.0,0.0,0.0801370004638539,0.0,0.0,0.06597725718359898,0.07276020534324171,0.1579012498438538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005484453537794,0.08127919648444662,0.04650706460828325,0.13456581389506272,0.0,0.0,0.16327788781925398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777621304273022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05776003229253927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06294135027946059,0.06489373622586014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109172267183074,0.0,0.1491849518314186,0.0,0.0,0.13523943970684335
mentalhealth,Naturalbornbad,2020/03/11,"Didn't went to a ""friend"" funeral Hi,

A distant ""friend"" past away last week.  I feel pretty much like i don't care. I fucking hate the world and have only one friend I am attached to. I am pretty much immume to others dead.

I don't want anyone on my funeeal. Pretending they give a fuck. Just 4 persons and that just  when they want to.

I am not attached at all to the people arround me and couldn't care less.  I just emotionally. I try to care and am capable of love. It's just not attached love or something.

Doesn't mean  i don't  cognitively try. I just don't feel it
Is this normal? What the hell is wrong with me I mean.

Doesn't mean I cant have a good with others or laugh.

It's his funeral now. I also just wanted to write it down.

So i dont feel like a psychopath or narcism or whatever.",0.3765154503616017,2.4101869704142054,2.5249211045364923,93.68279257067721,84.62130177514793,5.412360289283368,20.039776462853386,6.691623216298621,0.16884589086127555,614,18,140,7,18,207,88,169,0.185,0.628,0.188,0.3779,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,0,10,17,4,0,8,0,18,4,0,0,1,31,37,11,3,5,12,0,3,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,0,6,1,0,1,12,5,0,1,2,3,21,12,14,34,4,11,1,0,0,4,12,5,3,4,7,95,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116935496630676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845816838335184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885955011270928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3869536572703832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14826783058417406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14230581308974075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919005456316534,0.09037819189103898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29322206326724026,0.2339114185319928,0.0,0.12135914440545728,0.0,0.10610990788377728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490163561172153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031218762640764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12361200176296658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283589696744737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4134167918924807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18599762459661895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239521475074533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572590243912827,0.0962159410772446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076733837502165,0.08770554459299025,0.11046294658222912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574106578475259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739295651826096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17178287388513258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238551971699977,0.0,0.10147804273547507,0.0,0.0,0.1172752882287807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831794147447798,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trashbeingdumb,2020/03/11,"Is that because of loneliness? I'm in my teens and have/had no friends for the last couple of years. My brain is feeling so weak. My memory is getting worse and is followed by learning issues. Can this be caused by loneliness? The thing Is, that I can't even have friends or maintain them. Is there a way to cope with loneliness, without the need of having friends? I just can't stand this constant need for friends.",2.7632407407407413,5.1593532716049415,2.9266512345679025,92.11368055555558,78.01234567901234,6.025308641975308,28.64351851851852,7.1686216300943375,1.5108629629629633,329,15,66,4,8,100,54,81,0.19,0.664,0.146,-0.6226,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,12,2,1,1,0,11,18,4,0,2,3,0,1,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,1,6,4,11,17,0,7,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,3,46,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714304554740713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328343973940171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142600387643344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22539133177332799,0.0,0.0,0.2307800256259597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377592865894217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545984726502064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6445662549861285,0.0,0.1089698246131591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176941064876378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700133360959765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093057502815356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138565413449367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165554081613065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010551589961567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125518346159356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431299119447362
mentalhealth,Albertchristopher,2020/03/11,"AI Could Be Your Most Trusted Personal Therapist On average one in 6 people suffer from mental health issues. In 2017, this number shot up to 970 million and it keeps growing every year. These issues are strikingly underreported specially in the developing and under-developed nations. But even when the numbers are nowhere near their actual prevalence, they have a desperate story to tell. Here’s what mental health data from Our World in Data says:

[https://www.artiba.org/blog/ai-could-be-your-most-trusted-personal-therapist](https://www.artiba.org/blog/ai-could-be-your-most-trusted-personal-therapist)",16.590769230769233,21.273023461538465,10.810769230769232,40.70923076923079,45.15384615384616,10.841025641025643,34.7948717948718,10.864195022040775,4.800010256410257,522,17,49,11,6,141,66,78,0.071,0.8490000000000001,0.08,-0.0854,0,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,1,1,2,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,6,6,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,4,2,11,4,1,12,0,1,0,0,7,9,0,1,2,36,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.15997355464875662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39265803305684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827524896661232,0.0,0.13811940917901372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485031639013296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3422039146988899,0.0,0.14570990227330954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3304089096996937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108426729132607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364950244084147,0.14313871461010186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036495583604488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432834085686754,0.0,0.0,0.5710115267690139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556654960311587
mentalhealth,suhloman,2020/03/11,"I learned that people at my old school thought it was cool to make fun of me and be an asshole to me. I can't fucking do this anymore. I've been feeling insecure about every aspect of my life, and just when I starting to feel better, I learn that people at my old school liked to pick on me and shit like that because if was cool or funny or something. When I was initially told, I put on a facade of just agreeing, but later I cried until I couldn't anymore. Life isn't fair. The worst thing is that I've done nothing to these guys. I haven't interacted at all with some of them, yet they think it's funny.",5.1913727678571435,4.400901195312503,5.830491071428572,85.8296875,68.296875,8.251785714285715,30.004464285714285,6.868970318607317,1.4733870535714284,475,15,105,3,7,155,81,128,0.077,0.737,0.18600000000000005,0.8806,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,1,6,10,2,1,3,2,12,4,1,2,1,21,20,10,0,2,6,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,9,4,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,7,4,17,6,17,11,3,14,0,0,0,1,5,5,2,4,10,73,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3550794804855871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912893307135316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832864597489044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19664506868848167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831996189069416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508320747664164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810357863357673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550110936684015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17725794982917306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528942466995812,0.17492026298860372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949724304214457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717745224065594,0.0,0.3757027603983047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24821986064399745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17996455006699286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3623556037252187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837614619177519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13781834550401836,0.0,0.0,0.12671128051677313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893293624685185,0.11470879030090946,0.0,0.14212188675558093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710612859265364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BitterNGlitter,2020/03/11,"I(17) am afraid that me being content is leading to suicidal thoughts I have struggled with depression and anxiety my whole life, attempted suicide once at 13, and have been going to my current therapist for over 2 years, and I’ve reached a point in my life where I’m happy. The problem is, I’m getting older, I’m practically an adult now, and my sense of responsibility and commitment is nowhere near my peers. I still struggle with going to school at all. This had lead to a lot of thoughts along the lines of “I’ll never be able to function as an adult, I might as well just die.” I also struggle with feelings of extreme inadequacy, to the point where if I’m not the best it means I’m not good enough. Additionally, I have strong isolationist tendencies that make it difficult to create and maintain friendships, and put a lot of strain on preexisting relationships. I have a therapy appointment scheduled, but I needed to get this off my chest now.",9.781578212290501,7.874438296089388,9.484853351955307,66.91320181564248,59.89385474860335,12.748882681564247,42.48673184357542,11.45678717892309,4.791295530726257,761,36,138,17,8,248,111,179,0.151,0.772,0.077,-0.8844,1,1,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,0,5,8,13,0,5,10,0,13,3,1,3,3,32,28,12,3,3,5,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,6,12,0,0,4,0,0,5,3,8,1,0,4,1,14,5,27,21,6,24,0,1,0,0,3,11,0,4,8,96,20,3,0.1397599742578086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117660009200816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691599776735186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466694704783738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12037506103595412,0.0,0.14504878802532842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444094136043632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066684230211319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603763633898606,0.0,0.1588576282811666,0.1172240355403836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14877709142359855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197433206023534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23763786450002686,0.0,0.0,0.0932908680710731,0.0,0.0,0.152239584007168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482632466019424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363025001996147,0.1077915080767364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883981131244275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264236700179051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373142036791427,0.0,0.14049737609300875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15004990864262568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414445553778223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161249597760448,0.0,0.0,0.43832241071396544,0.0,0.30574945575262924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15982771076633692,0.16227210211239065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22190761644016824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566100135592292,0.0,0.0,0.15603702014242274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000084121128021
mentalhealth,CloudsNeverSleep,2020/03/11,"To be happy in a dysfunctional world If I become emotionally upset after talking with a homeless person who's been sleeping in a shop doorway. Someone I've been trying to help. Do I have a mental health issue?

If I am happy and carefree, and if I can walk past a homeless person on the street without caring - am I mentally well adjusted?",4.562153846153848,6.2567886,6.544615384615388,71.29538461538462,70.69230769230771,7.661538461538463,31.461538461538463,8.238735603445708,2.7709076923076927,269,12,42,4,5,94,46,65,0.079,0.6920000000000001,0.23,0.8759,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,6,0,8,2,1,0,0,8,9,5,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,1,1,1,1,0,2,0,5,4,8,6,0,8,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,3,2,34,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287356776393589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21116148293550427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23296980884748664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4409428768328535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22014723880332446,0.0,0.0,0.13882083275638246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21616804302522308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41743442631699457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19770902625394496,0.0,0.3616792735482052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20725862498268555,0.0,0.17548282876790675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664664118920765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061345219627022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18621591171525248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199645736678647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ladoone,2020/03/11,"Has anyone tried hypnoanalysis/analytical hypnotherapy? (Sorry if this is the wrong sub for this kind of post, but I wasn’t sure where else to write it.)

For years, I’ve been suffering with emetophobia (fear of vomit, being sick, etc.), which has disrupted my whole life and branched off into a myriad of other issues. It’s caused severe anxiety, which has led to depression on and off over the last so many years.

I want to go to an analytical hypnotherapist, as it would be wonderful to get to the root of the issue and get rid of it once and for all. But it almost sounds too good to be true, so I wondered if anyone else has ever tried it, and what your experience was?",6.949329670329673,6.442046130769231,7.9005494505494545,71.4973076923077,64.61538461538461,11.428571428571427,29.340659340659343,10.914260884657429,2.9459120879120886,527,14,104,13,7,179,86,130,0.14400000000000002,0.742,0.114,-0.6715,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,0,5,8,0,1,6,0,12,3,0,3,4,24,18,12,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,12,7,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,4,0,0,3,1,5,4,22,11,3,13,0,2,0,0,2,6,0,5,4,74,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579557744441176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206721579259918,0.0,0.0,0.2205936744705803,0.1616252660900054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204443189653325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358629080681622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26354631192954997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17592396844041736,0.0,0.1426866222299878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15430189276620454,0.0,0.17750354558459086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648273138111983,0.0,0.08964838381533181,0.1323064613794476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32928322067385635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16426396412835997,0.0,0.12858074058695068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141780236176188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599255759848182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16799002573452554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151073181612004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782035009890808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17657919547918627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866991853121614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21419285552700587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304028747061366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761132508710251,0.0,0.0,0.34212882605229605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205535352452677,0.17246605662707942,0.0,0.2031612845769305
mentalhealth,surfsammy11,2020/03/11,"I just broke up and want to die Hi there,

I hope I am still there if you read this. My girlfriend broke up with me because lack of attention from me.. I now feel so so sorry for this but here feelings are gone she said. Since it happens 2 days ago I can not sleep and barely eat (like half a biscuit a day) I can not handle this anymore, she was everything in my life but I fucked up. Please help me, what can I do?  I can not live without her but she’s done because of my mistakes which is fully understandable :(",0.3716978193146403,2.532036504672895,1.8931074766355136,97.3714992211838,85.82242990654207,4.68816199376947,20.1316199376947,5.985473137389443,-0.16805856697819355,394,12,91,3,12,127,75,107,0.19899999999999998,0.718,0.083,-0.9255,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,1,0,0,8,6,1,0,2,0,10,4,1,0,0,20,19,8,1,5,9,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,6,3,1,0,4,1,0,1,4,4,0,1,4,3,20,2,11,15,1,10,0,2,0,1,9,4,1,2,6,68,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263075170164386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20432369941082468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511846337884934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26574110125823325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21382378790555606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108374373789756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108173410021566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18516403349020613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20834716519966887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19046889939223552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18218924224736774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380957421262005,0.0,0.0,0.20463157512257368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14552315998296494,0.1006545215929384,0.0,0.18192586179516185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261560833166475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20608303273032325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19597912193250147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17042789406928344,0.0,0.20617606925948892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230630670940246,0.0,0.0,0.16453365100408596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214481663196656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152022703235316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19860294468448356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jehuty8434,2020/03/11,"Looking for coping strategies I kinda feel like my life is governed totally by my emotions and while most people could probably say the same I feel like I have no control over my emotions, either in the emotion felt of how strongly. When I feel happy I feel like I'm too giddy and childlike, when I'm low it feels like the worst thing that's ever happened to anyone and takes me months to get over. I'm impulsive, have an addictive personality and I shy away from friendship as I don't trust myself to act appropriately in social situations and it's starting to get to me.

I am 35 and have felt this way most of my adult life, I kinda thought things would get easier over time but if anything the opposite is true. I've tried meds  but they just stop me feeling anything at all and I think that's just as bad. For background I had a violent upbringing and I've been told growing up like that can give you a heightened emotional state to help you identify potentially threatening situations quicker 

I'm looking for some non-chemical strats to manage my emotion, I want to feel less but not nothing at all if that makes sense?

Please help",4.188255404725993,6.106946108597286,5.002858220211163,81.06264831573657,72.07692307692307,7.988034188034189,29.92483660130719,8.680891452615391,2.4397448969331323,914,39,170,17,18,296,132,221,0.11900000000000001,0.72,0.162,0.6218,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,1,2,7,13,1,0,7,0,12,3,0,3,5,46,39,19,0,5,9,0,9,5,0,1,3,1,0,2,9,8,0,2,11,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,6,12,24,9,26,31,10,22,0,1,2,0,11,10,0,7,13,111,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694543964774736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859505779469896,0.0,0.16145884106066585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092169868068031,0.0,0.08191090320042002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11002950766508644,0.0783263026904545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5517565902511689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873869227561848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34722251512804536,0.28033577495203843,0.1883862200387563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15376242057927206,0.09410818329779352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675109554598939,0.10443118763775433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13151113393861666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13858440158278754,0.2396379147345349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476160466740192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548371160638175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896898155898807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830391882137655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413132052450758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801143422051657,0.08565870561713791,0.0,0.1076863142417108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057703300948755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801448689244317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22054106139575266,0.0,0.10000242830392174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943695720000267,0.0,0.0,0.0820174954204522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376034280312886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13034895030912608,0.06285967066313386,0.0,0.07788186914048728,0.05720394703792036,0.0,0.0,0.0937404715745573,0.0,0.06660468093361427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057862981897364475,0.07786864059529494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968870226825519,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,platonic_thoughts,2020/03/11,"Deleted all social media last night & feeling like a huge weight has been lifted off of me For the sake of bettering my mental health and attempting to heal from depression, pulled the trigger & deleted all of my social media yesterday (Instagram, Facebook, Snapchat). I never realized it until I was honest with myself but it became more of an unhealthy addiction. I would unknowingly compare myself to others and I’d always feel like shit once I was done scrolling. It also began to minimize the time and energy I had in regards to working on myself and my future. I’m hoping I can keep this same energy going forward. Just wanted to give my 2 cents & I’d enjoy hearing of anyone else’s story who’s also embarking on this journey, as well how it’s affected your mental health. Good day!",8.081761744966443,7.8268909597315455,8.621401006711412,66.42458473154366,62.22147651006711,10.939932885906039,35.40352348993289,10.411451182825502,3.9527912751677854,639,25,98,13,8,214,103,149,0.086,0.73,0.183,0.9185,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,3,5,10,1,0,5,0,8,6,1,3,3,22,18,10,0,3,2,0,3,2,0,1,4,1,0,0,8,5,1,1,3,0,1,4,1,2,1,0,6,4,15,8,19,11,4,18,0,1,0,0,6,6,1,2,12,70,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367805081377606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22546723230588175,0.11729828925803447,0.4582226379362156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856946506619642,0.14444037035883536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467646283793672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909139540397418,0.0,0.12141720928994815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442612001001878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776230233895135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14255728234426693,0.20141791744415952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352312190446457,0.08011646986645411,0.1182389037607042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996889244625149,0.15888337631237426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14001496590243584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530056659167016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490932229030347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13774159144618334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841291013609521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872471409940253,0.0,0.0,0.13229074624267895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15012839341698458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470362540375006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874022175982477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822007100872884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314772749122158,0.0,0.0,0.1716634186339263,0.12674891268931032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262780078608527,0.0,0.0,0.10014100613922354,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hushushson,2020/03/11,"Giving up my addictions and suffering silently I (21M) have just given up smoking bongs, and cigarettes about 2 weeks before the weed. I've started to struggle interacting day to day. I was a functioning pot head. From the moment I got home to the moment I went to bed I'd smoke and I basicly gave up cold turkey, my moods were fine when I gave cigarrettes up. As soon as I gave up bongs though, ive become real moody. My main reason to giving up was my career choice. I'm currently an apprentice Electritian but am not enjoying it at all. One day I got home and thought to myself is this what I'm going to do for the rest of my life? Anyway I decided that I want to start studying to become a barrister. I want my work to become the addiction. But every day I've been having mental blocks. One moment ill be as confident as ever. The next ill be real upset and constantly doubting myself. I'm on lemotrogine and lexapro because I've been struggling with anxiety and depression for a while. I dont really know why I wrote all of this. I guess i just want someone to help relate with me or for someone to share their coping meconisms. I usually try to keep myself busy but gaming doesnt really do it for me anymore at the moment. Sorry that it was so much of a read im just not entirely sure how to kick the subject off.",2.7556961406936966,4.59731323595506,4.493945611463932,83.51958964338057,75.81647940074906,7.639732942517504,25.091841719589638,8.456263369488248,1.7779963849535907,1042,36,203,20,23,352,148,267,0.149,0.778,0.073,-0.9705,2,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,1,11,12,0,4,13,0,17,6,1,2,4,37,40,20,0,3,9,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,3,0,8,9,0,2,4,2,0,2,4,7,0,2,15,1,29,4,39,23,5,31,0,2,0,0,11,10,0,3,19,136,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24381884955160496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855483934454872,0.0,0.11090368930145876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816953359621862,0.37051693103698335,0.0951577024095292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208467352458483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2884801774199791,0.0,0.09631760725776932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13106201139793847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115515880162602,0.09422022096975577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145519160109684,0.06355463714413408,0.0,0.17887871905651614,0.0,0.12319155213263805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476816538752825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749561960887594,0.0,0.22434593685330206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079382447893194,0.0,0.0,0.09939818937307428,0.0,0.0,0.061457945060997984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898768164170293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269669001382965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220671570773476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893073527108057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15155558907563654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185862774671013,0.25457032434667154,0.14328022881203775,0.11497818462209122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18950362221815245,0.0,0.0,0.12518269954537126,0.15830538521915635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23381457612063844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105396910957847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987080122468078,0.08877923078023564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592411950184362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316314549878185,0.0,0.1978778018629322,0.0,0.08970196934315257,0.0,0.0,0.10366601508889677,0.10090770598652007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141238188268174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ridingthest0rm,2020/03/11,"Inappropriately strong response to death? Does anyone else have a really strong reaction to death that seems inappropriately over the top considering the relationship with the deceased? I feel very upset at times. Most of the time I'm okay but then it'll hit me like a tonne of bricks and I'll start crying and it'll feel unbearable. In comparison to those directly affected and / or those who knew them really well, this seems like a disproportionate response. 

The news was a big unexpected shock. I knew the person but haven't seem them in a while. We commented on each others social media but that's been the extent of contact for a good while, possibly over a year. My husband on the other hand saw them regularly but seems relatively okay and is expecting me not to be upset. 

I just don't know how I'm supposed to feel. A similar thing happened when I was a lot younger although my boyfriend at the time made me feel like utter crap for feeling so upset and told me he didn't want to be around me etc.",5.181406365655068,6.669132207253887,6.049641006661734,76.24353626943007,68.89637305699482,9.452109548482603,28.293486306439675,9.784248007369934,2.6242719467061435,808,28,153,19,14,266,116,193,0.13699999999999998,0.708,0.155,0.4387,0,0,0,0,1,0,14.0,1,0,3,3,6,14,1,3,18,2,12,2,2,3,0,36,33,17,2,2,7,1,6,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,11,9,0,0,12,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,9,7,15,9,21,19,5,20,0,0,1,0,13,11,1,7,12,99,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423958438389358,0.15274917201132432,0.0,0.13271202012122416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16375640904712924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13046013930660974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453647226003345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16626262196688707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37689440265512575,0.10650215047706944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504048974746654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318301702088545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192998356656744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184975778515748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674173356448254,0.0,0.14106226443182787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017013410961487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16806430408720582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19100779859029107,0.0,0.0,0.1600551796118035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5428641138630831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15196738509908367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551896582802857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904154061482652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26078769474315805,0.0,0.0,0.1424514842764253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230058837812854,0.08793072530452996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134040029242029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600206315082492
mentalhealth,HeartBrokenAlways,2020/03/11,"Having Borderline Personality Disorder Sucks I've ruined all of my relationships because of my erratic behaviour and have made attempts at my life. The constant ups and downs are getting tiring, I just want it to stop.",7.0899122807017525,9.560550973684217,7.981578947368423,60.39938596491231,65.57894736842105,11.382456140350875,38.982456140350884,11.20814326018867,5.5599719298245605,179,10,25,6,3,60,33,38,0.245,0.7240000000000001,0.03,-0.8481,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,0,3,2,0,1,1,7,7,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,6,6,1,5,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20545710779283452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3642216603224003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.386278265756038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17609004806609088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380620750244601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31891640947131417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2942912617902874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618559747688663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817814259772664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873791288868477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19879555534769847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Small-Still,2020/03/11,"Have I gone completely mad? Okay so you know how people say they ""hear voices"" and stuff like that? 

Well I'm not exactly hearing voices, I'm hearing birds singing.

And it's not all the time, it's usually when I leave my house, but here's the thing.

I look and there are no birds around. 

And then when I drive, I keep the windows rolled down, I can still hear the birds singing as if from the same distance, as if from outside. I hear it at night too, like morning birds singing but in the dead of night. 

I take it as a good thing? Because it's technically not threatening, and it's peaceful? But they have to be hallucinations, right?",1.7754027861901849,4.041808236220476,2.4357480314960647,94.9995457298607,80.81102362204723,5.797456087219867,23.155057540884318,7.010146845296331,0.5764468806783771,494,17,110,6,13,153,76,127,0.091,0.752,0.157,0.8324,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,2,0,10,6,1,0,7,1,5,0,0,1,2,20,17,18,1,2,8,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,1,0,10,6,0,1,1,3,0,2,4,1,1,0,1,9,12,5,11,15,2,15,0,0,1,0,9,5,0,2,10,71,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352838248824742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458856359430211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14549023942820866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163877200417402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7819792527405337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601137326637406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333882336271652,0.0,0.0,0.07626044979213005,0.0,0.0,0.1469298539625518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558506780295496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652587073345733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604391253316557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620070899861696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850274118791405,0.0,0.11034981157554154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11081621508010728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15885029867800646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433241637920768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18437578299415808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091375113079442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15282770786150562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476449371971547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PumpkinEater324,2020/03/11,"Weight :/ So, I’m a 14 year old male. 5’4. I play basketball and I’m at the gym basically everyday. However, I just can’t get it through my head that I look fit enough. I’ve been told by many people that I do and that I look great physically, but I can’t bring myself to accept it. It’s all a mental thing for me and it really brings me down if I’m going out or doing anything outside my home. I had a ex step mother who constantly preached that I was too heavy looking and that I needed to lose weight and I’m thinking this contributes to my thinking. Not sure what to do.",0.4808322824716278,2.541646049180329,2.868360655737707,91.21289407313999,84.40983606557377,6.376796973518286,20.86002522068096,7.61054688173877,0.7441896595208068,446,14,101,8,13,153,81,122,0.068,0.8490000000000001,0.083,0.1796,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,4,0,8,3,1,0,2,17,23,9,0,2,5,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,13,6,2,0,3,2,0,4,3,1,0,0,4,5,15,4,10,19,2,12,1,1,3,0,5,4,0,2,4,64,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229169375619736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999881633425472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912203193354882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09668816858521287,0.0,0.10517599113041873,0.0,0.0,0.20403343229431747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18992879335425816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18563402550089306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4662208091415646,0.2070389932832064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18762559061806205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865007275935033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372224220501563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19419326939939624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829989914691586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855657393278138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17442038960801753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294812901859285,0.2371627506145293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17683633916621566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4507155701132313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191749842848443
mentalhealth,xSoliasx,2020/03/11,"Disappointed in myself/self harm relapse I'm so very disappointed in myself today.
For the first time in almost 8 years I self harmed.

Work was really shit today, had a meeting with our regional manager about my issues with our new store manager and was basically told to suck it up because this is how it is now.

I just felt so hopeless and out of control and couldn't stop myself.
That's pretty much it. I just needed to get it out.",2.242545219638245,4.690627104651167,4.190155038759691,82.04076227390182,80.27906976744184,7.078036175710594,22.34625322997416,8.167268648758528,1.4851307493540054,345,11,65,7,9,117,62,86,0.245,0.7020000000000001,0.053,-0.9622,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,2,0,0,3,7,7,2,0,2,0,6,1,1,2,0,16,12,6,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,7,0,1,5,1,8,0,13,6,1,14,0,3,0,0,5,6,2,1,8,46,14,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150257811159456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090027845949506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408432224325703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20617898443265595,0.0,0.0,0.18265322393887756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219001656072694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22412723429373516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578547103038994,0.15922305725278316,0.0,0.2073921088769759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218462385806168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756454577148727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44803024263905095,0.0,0.22042208109401934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17952782223689107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521352892362778,0.0,0.4070867697938958,0.20518820565011928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17717861421866554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15632941720881793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13828210479297312
mentalhealth,snoopysnape,2020/03/11,"I feel like I'm bringing my family down. I've been feeling really sad, unmotivated and tired at the moment and I don't want to go to school anymore. My mum seems really sad seeing me like this and I feel so bad for being this way.",0.8681632653061229,2.8995354081632674,3.885061224489796,84.66351020408162,82.6734693877551,7.185306122448982,17.963265306122448,8.238735603445708,0.7992742857142856,181,4,39,4,5,65,36,49,0.309,0.58,0.111,-0.9114,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,8,12,4,0,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,1,4,6,2,5,10,0,6,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,3,21,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741410096621464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23080474927063746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26059049268006584,0.0,0.41930893767669297,0.1974792906723292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709966462923694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27009624684865696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.354172046381497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797585794766876,0.2202762918849499,0.2516484870421137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31771182918365515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16304363042115935,0.2194146489224681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MHRMajor,2020/03/11,"Getting rid of stressful situations brought me sanity A lot of that being ridding of toxic relationships. Doing whatever I want and becoming newly single definitely helps, too. I’m grateful for always being in the moment, and enjoying every second!",7.130121951219515,10.568476097560977,9.129451219512196,47.86539634146342,68.51219512195122,10.929268292682927,37.079268292682926,10.686352973137794,6.0270926829268285,204,11,20,7,4,72,36,41,0.068,0.659,0.27399999999999997,0.8398,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,7,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,1,5,4,2,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,19,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29158664165750203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870234772925514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952532083939852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18308571968752327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348864941774958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979238813890517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3762317194605039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3938990957040264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4014174951504408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20669326700310572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heavyhardcoremusic,2020/03/11,"Television makes my anxiety worse. (Side note: really proud of myself atm) Hello, I'm trying to return back to watching television. I've got multiple diagnoses. Movies seem to be a emotional rollercoaster, I cry at the end of movies even if I'm not sad and the movie ended happy. (Almost like a  stress release)

Does this happen to anyone else? 

My diagnoses are:
ADHD
Minor Psychosis
Severe OCD
Major depression 
Advanced motor Tics
Severe generalized anxiety disorder
Sensory processing disorder
Post concussion syndrome

On a positive note I'm really really happy that I've began being a part of society again. 
Dispite all those diagnoses, I've ended up in a band too, I sing. 

Hope you all are well <3",4.742252307692309,7.793123016000006,6.473600000000001,65.77618461538464,74.84,10.886153846153846,29.615384615384606,10.560738912317856,4.665652307692309,567,25,79,22,13,194,89,125,0.182,0.627,0.191,0.3285,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,2,5,9,0,1,7,0,4,3,0,1,2,10,13,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,3,1,0,2,1,6,6,11,9,4,14,0,2,1,0,3,5,0,4,8,42,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977261459019707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312401357923795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203403288634554,0.0,0.0,0.09295739715455888,0.13621663527930056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222557727560627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603252346380666,0.0,0.0,0.11450430148712012,0.4048054804432008,0.0,0.0,0.3047302286183261,0.0,0.11634001664570552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105748723507357,0.1495438830188924,0.3532462451384061,0.0,0.0,0.08780812711362468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632730276231499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756176467402613,0.2830422977007886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204319191784153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494962619592687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887410198730009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14396518182059198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273234128423095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555016105175371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102704392863432,0.0,0.300377309649177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228667552733802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902601146051827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953244351946225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548109150576398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nobullyplsthrowaway,2020/03/11,"Does anyone else feel like they were sent on this Earth to suffer Probably going to sound crazy, but after years of childhood trauma and still continued suffering I have come to a conclusion (that I've thought of for a very long time)

​

It only makes sense (to me) that my soul is from a fallen angel from hell. Implanted in this human body, sent to form in a horrible woman. I think the portal from hell opened and myself was implanted into whatever sperm reached her first. I'm only embarrassed about comparing myself to an angel, that sounds super conceited, but they are angels who were ""expelled"" from hell. Who knows what sins I committed in the holy life to throw me into the turmoil that is my human life? But clearly I have some part of the devil in me; and I was formed to wreak havoc on this earth from my building up resentment. 

​

I used to be suicidal, well I am to a certain extent. I'm feeling this sadness to turn into anger. When I die I will dethrone God himself and strangle him with my bare hands for all the pain he's put me through. I hate God, and no one else. This is the only person I have genuine hate for. I do not hate my family, they are only sad junkies. All my rage has burnt out for them and now I know the true source of my pain. 

And there is someone in my mind playing some sort of role. My mother had a miscarriage before me, and I was born premature a year later (another sign of my mistaken existence) and I genuinely believe They (my would be sibling) stayed in her somehow so they could implant himself into my head and help me realize these things. They have created horrible conflict in me at the same time, as we are opposite genders. So I firmly believe I have half the mind of a woman and half of a man and I truly do not feel like my own gender (Not interested in transitioning and would not consider myself dysphoric, there are only 2 souls inhabiting this sad vessel)

I'm really going off here, I've had these thoughts forming in my head for years and have never told anyone. I hate this god forsaken life and see no end to my misery.",6.924256501444766,6.400255278728608,7.3264692153811986,75.64786785952434,64.67237163814181,10.565947988441877,33.26083574127584,10.018931242160765,3.1715418092909538,1655,60,310,32,22,543,213,409,0.28600000000000003,0.614,0.10099999999999999,-0.9989,0,0,0,0,0,0,50.0,1,0,7,3,11,30,10,2,19,0,31,9,4,2,7,62,56,22,2,3,7,1,4,2,0,3,5,2,0,6,18,24,0,1,10,1,0,8,7,22,1,4,12,7,57,8,54,38,11,46,10,5,1,0,28,20,3,4,19,228,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998174239715721,0.22408872621659884,0.0,0.09668946572644377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289497394573829,0.09447930001644693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846330231396664,0.20777655555200444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024237185062462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943012647842555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362160372270114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956986704867105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069295878620443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405803606939772,0.0,0.08167004934378574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692669896643071,0.0,0.1398713415232127,0.13174865035044298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784331630325333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480931299146774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641502794888003,0.18926663903812727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061805933992667865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135161318130644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953904157035947,0.09009758913423314,0.0,0.0,0.08160230757423835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061550407724839676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862101656340586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111747814742098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062483391790164426,0.3506465474106697,0.19623434173279988,0.0,0.0,0.09985366014408488,0.0,0.0,0.08051358309694584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941719525097922,0.0,0.0,0.092695790719909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059071623338014835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347885457061958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812862029656159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09828281934643017,0.07363844689894912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086198173697457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061259745677348626,0.059083980792377276,0.0,0.14640773048369582,0.10753594068760758,0.0,0.0,0.08810991472832842,0.0,0.0,0.10029721369211686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963920852862043,0.0,0.07608230960949945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290721298333524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100564806739035,0.0,0.22408872621659884,0.1781392515689493
mentalhealth,troppofigocanadese,2020/03/11,"Microdosing Got introduced to it by a friend... has worked amazing for me

anyone else have any experience with it?",10.000500000000002,9.473154050000002,9.91,59.63500000000002,58.5,14.0,40.0,13.023866798666859,5.512999999999997,91,4,15,3,1,30,19,20,0.0,0.826,0.174,0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920328845457291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30027336200708377,0.44001045950760415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3587407359598049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.420073224820814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33178309537354456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34346117308448765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126363195411039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,swineswineswineswine,2020/03/11,"I feel like this is not normal Hi, I'm 14 and I wanted to come here to talk about something.

Sometimes I will be having a really fun time and all of a sudden something in my brain clicks. Something makes me realise that all this laughter and happiness is not normal and just a facade to hide reality. I think about how society gives us this perspective of what happy is and that we need to be it, but in reality life just isn't as easy as that.

I used to have depression a couple years ago, and I kind of just switched off my emotions. I'm still working on them and have almost healed fully, but I dont know what is wrong with me.",4.6292307692307695,4.767103730769231,5.633653846153845,83.61509615384615,69.38461538461539,8.653846153846155,27.788461538461537,8.472884824447931,1.7393076923076918,495,15,105,7,8,164,81,130,0.10400000000000001,0.8109999999999999,0.085,-0.6796,0,0,3,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,1,1,8,7,0,0,4,0,12,3,1,3,2,30,23,12,0,4,7,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,10,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,2,14,5,17,20,2,10,0,1,1,0,6,4,0,1,6,75,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14984007828994486,0.0,0.169264982422501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886999074581316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456094137268124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18703494829893566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559032632367158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19810875240075534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19014257495713846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546960261108498,0.12075924203669387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215458603435248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3598836021919654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760248214963099,0.09289768019949668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939501689436112,0.08258237594269882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283273967711073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253379378383322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3312384784122828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828869124960662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.390396157395045,0.1671807737623399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499224483321667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13586460991499635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831134464026138,0.0,0.0,0.09856616105437543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033293097000612,0.1459926979553468,0.0,0.0,0.09970172143892994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306010897224512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848141617246701,0.0,0.10885354265732418
mentalhealth,boopyboopboob,2020/03/11,How to get help for paranoid delusions? Hi guys. I think i may be suffering from paranoid delusions. I think ive been having them for the past year. Im sure people are following me and conspiring against me and i dont know if its real or not. How do i even begin to get help for something like this. Please be kind this was really hard to do,-0.4241357234314975,1.8096183661971807,1.5526248399487876,95.42729833546736,97.73239436619718,4.835339308578745,19.130601792573625,6.574015621080383,0.2671577464788739,268,9,58,4,11,88,49,71,0.113,0.679,0.20800000000000002,0.8142,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,11,0,0,2,1,13,18,6,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,1,9,3,8,13,0,4,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,3,4,39,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832994721761561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15965684178626854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525822901448813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393453927350101,0.0,0.0,0.21653779357670325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32404585526774565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26110408616511555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25171900996544033,0.1328455378572482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180944467728134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307535160052093,0.16758142607347626,0.0,0.0,0.2653410608973528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27513555510814985,0.15485499101827327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860914337694756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22782260797673864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3097747716385981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15566273981142414
mentalhealth,runaway-42,2020/03/11,"How to handle PTSD? So I was diagnosed with PTSD before I realized I had it, I figured the doctor had just decided based on my trauma that I had it. I was however aware of episodes of blacking our after major anxiety, my wife told me during my blackouts I would act strange and say things as if I though she was attacking me. After a major episode involving me injuring myself I went to a mental health center for a month, after being in this center I am now completely conscious and aware during my PTSD episodes. I am having a really hard time with it, I feel hopeless and like i will never get away. It’s so intense when it happens and I’m effected by it for days after the episode. Are there any tips on making it easier to live with PTSD?",3.978151105651104,5.320901790540539,5.523488943488946,79.42593366093368,71.63513513513513,8.625061425061427,28.31941031941032,9.095868883498916,2.463181081081081,587,22,109,12,11,199,92,148,0.102,0.8490000000000001,0.05,-0.7439,1,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,1,0,0,1,8,4,1,0,6,0,13,4,0,3,1,19,20,11,0,2,2,1,2,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,10,7,0,0,6,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,8,4,23,1,20,9,2,18,0,1,1,0,6,6,0,1,11,86,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565641736905244,0.0,0.11885705045744735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675495092267138,0.14597452416923049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220778767647098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629017018773634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020031242734156,0.0,0.0,0.15769651755215908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15902701022709345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855936077449731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117402013494361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137392514049584,0.0,0.1391803297506667,0.0,0.0,0.16515024662237884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590556720871232,0.0,0.13719389363690918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371018037609846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565756600665614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401425248975816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983034327790038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7264733523231299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995335195646817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12355586311597445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322042548270208,0.0,0.15264949859383864,0.0,0.09059705871878736,0.0,0.0,0.14846197591815213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14402885068782634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036985694794696,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RecoveryIsGoals,2020/03/11,"Trouble naming emotions So, the way I approach emotions is through sensing.

Observing my bodily sensations or signatures and being present with them is my way of noticing how I feel.

But then I am having trouble naming these sensations as a particular emotions.

I will give you an analogy of what my problem is. When we read books we come across words for different tastes. Sour, bitter etc.. But I can never know what it is bitter and sour until I taste food items that are sour or bitter.. We learn such things through our senses. 

So there is a difference between a taste when it is an abstract idea Vs a concrete and real experience.

Just the same way how can I see if I am feeling passionate. Do you have any concrete examples of emotions such as passion ?

How can I resolve this issue ? Do you guys have your own ways of finding what you feel ?",3.7467924528301886,6.221653993710697,4.499974842767298,81.67977358490569,75.10062893081759,7.258867924528303,30.72578616352201,8.238735603445708,2.5617854088050307,671,32,117,12,15,215,97,159,0.08800000000000001,0.847,0.065,-0.5775,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,4,5,1,1,11,9,3,0,8,0,19,6,0,3,1,33,26,19,0,2,7,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,9,8,4,0,8,2,0,2,1,6,0,0,0,13,22,3,13,24,4,13,0,0,1,2,14,1,0,3,6,96,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930233682317415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178343443645098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858374114595766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6154911302064633,0.0,0.0,0.15255943192563992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13380899324946655,0.0,0.0,0.2074986979688226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125025567638245,0.0,0.16540963819641316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122351668076254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13544575739649214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15442171256497134,0.0,0.14277548856471636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517740068529588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055025565474186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573879525841527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089163507656215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682919059326626,0.1556994401374855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900565109053248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087864123932428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4343170381147744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i-hades,2020/03/11,"Should I stay away from my friends while I try to recover from my depression ? Umm so this may sound wierd but should I stay away from my friends while I try to recover from my depression ? I mean I surely do love them but they are also the reason I feel jealous at times for just how happy they are and I feel like a toxic person for even thinking that. 

I am afraid of even losing them but I don't think I will be able to recover if I stay close to them. 

Am I thinking straight or is it my mind playing games again ?",2.1452777777777783,3.674144453703704,3.184444444444445,93.605,76.68518518518519,6.651851851851853,23.11111111111111,7.3871296695380915,0.6827888888888882,403,12,92,5,9,129,64,108,0.11800000000000001,0.648,0.23399999999999999,0.9376,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,5,1,7,12,1,1,2,0,12,1,0,2,1,21,19,11,0,3,6,0,2,1,2,4,0,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,7,2,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,3,23,7,14,14,0,12,0,3,0,1,10,5,0,3,5,69,26,0,0.16167147675563487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12928862155118545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037913486229914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784948120601856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135649712741707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16349191266399918,0.11549813529771405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24981396379593115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172102293275268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898451720107905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808690285273773,0.0,0.0,0.14591481984784008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17610763380437036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16324210416581267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14116529754346022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16622520445122302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5169608494411396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15237345353884935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31077766289068864,0.0,0.0,0.09427193822378684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21952864064524835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,liyeahn,2020/03/11,"I'm tired of attempting to kill myself and always failing by backing out last minute. Whenever things get too much, I gradually get into a hysteric stream where my thoughts jumble together. At its peak, it stops being coherent and all I can think at that moment is to end it. I feel so disgusted of myself after it happens, especially since I always fail in harming myself in a way that's not superficial. I feel like I'm hurting other people more than myself. I wish I could at least throw myself into a coma once just so I can tell myself I've somehow hurt myself ""enough"" as punishment. I'm bad at many things but I honestly wish killing myself wasn't one of them.",5.9697692307692325,6.4405997846153875,7.085961538461536,73.20278846153846,66.53846153846155,9.884615384615383,30.865384615384606,9.827888789773867,3.0104615384615383,532,19,94,11,8,180,88,130,0.23,0.69,0.08,-0.9493,1,0,0,0,0,4,12.0,0,0,1,3,7,12,4,0,3,0,6,2,0,0,1,18,18,6,2,3,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,2,10,0,1,2,2,19,2,18,14,5,18,0,4,0,0,2,10,0,1,7,72,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766926959083587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784802917579535,0.13882488074711338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327495999373731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726202403969174,0.17179687185831735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813782631745622,0.11878022035614295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17373388943573895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14702817358009135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3559816545295421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3678966358222245,0.0,0.0,0.13552870366064915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122900282056257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856728228865672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222439049201685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17706750102534366,0.11266591385480546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11526767348665914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753667166629896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900553621123796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453235148437784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22091903245040814,0.106536321083658,0.0,0.13199636157515832,0.0,0.1910979169091964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319739414682247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3823946058900132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shhlickdick-,2020/03/11,I don’t know why I feel like this. I (20M) grew up in what I thought was a normal family. We didn’t have any problems with money or anything. My dad is a functioning alcoholic but it never got in the way of his business job so my mom never said anything. Since highschool I have always had this problem where I feel like I know what everyone is thinking about me and it’s never positive. I also just create situations in my head like where I’m definitely going to be in trouble at work even though I didn’t do anything wrong. It creates so much stress just always thinking someone is mad at me. I will text my mom throughout the day just to make sure she isn’t mad at me even though she isn’t at all and we will have just have been having a good time. I don’t know why I keep feeling this but it has gotten to the point where it will get so intense sometimes that my chest just feels super tight and I feel lightheaded. If anyone has any ideas it would be helpful I just need to know I’m not going crazy. I do have a psychotherapy appointment planned.,3.010970452697208,4.425243336405528,4.179018704255899,87.83642721604772,74.16129032258064,6.949200325291407,25.667931688804554,7.510576382923642,1.1874155055570617,832,28,175,10,17,272,117,217,0.128,0.706,0.166,0.7206,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,2,0,0,3,18,13,2,1,7,0,28,3,2,1,5,43,51,13,0,6,11,3,6,3,0,4,1,1,0,0,12,6,1,2,13,0,1,3,10,7,0,0,9,7,28,6,16,36,2,22,0,0,0,0,10,13,0,2,8,121,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174770835432927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110318487599353,0.18958404948910546,0.0,0.0,0.15494139744002447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965673865079166,0.0,0.28124368836576197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347010630310655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504884871351513,0.0,0.0,0.10885711719297554,0.0,0.0,0.10739529014145004,0.0,0.2880113069204104,0.16277144649878394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951941410052395,0.0,0.12948871534385048,0.09555216160397452,0.0911136329849996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691658521075553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635934980309332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286037927603996,0.0,0.0,0.11304976163704004,0.10125888863336947,0.0,0.0,0.2504336649920149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16696924261186116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604365487853665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26684756097215145,0.0,0.0,0.08374559660761276,0.0844715365012014,0.26359043736562543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161913025845374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769287953967252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21801546468892674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836567511307596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423725148272977,0.12805282373220256,0.0,0.0,0.09652553179709156,0.0,0.11267152688741333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049698339024707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736990418331302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599291898475655,0.2238550882151734,0.0904411468582272,0.06642869042593752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042578506976903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055933257372936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293639313181432,0.0,0.0,0.08092674489916722,0.12455555338879942,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,morganpdodson,2020/03/11,"Finally took myself voluntarily to the hospital and finally found some relief, some hope. I have a serious neurological disorder, crps, brachial plexus injury, and allodynia cover half my body. I am having troubles talking, forming sentences, right eye isn't the best for focus. I woke up this morning to my whole right side being numb and tingly, pins and needles, hardly form a sentence. 

That's what I went in for....

I finally admitted that a couple days ago I seriously thought about killing myself with a kitchen knife. In the past it was a bridge.

I don't know how long I'll be here but I'm happy I'm getting help. ❤️",4.188135593220338,6.307446796610176,5.512000000000004,76.56138983050847,72.5593220338983,8.448813559322032,31.29152542372881,9.120678840339163,2.9911803389830505,494,23,88,11,10,165,88,118,0.129,0.732,0.139,0.4726,0,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,0,1,3,9,1,0,8,0,8,5,2,1,0,14,19,6,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,5,5,1,0,4,0,0,2,2,5,0,1,6,2,11,4,9,11,6,15,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,3,7,55,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15555013877070967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841527186668526,0.0,0.0,0.19491584710080567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19416241966034986,0.0,0.11316841438984047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011123177508748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5766807854544019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924019258476844,0.0,0.0,0.09167970563945954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18679896894454465,0.1571932946173148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761881091343762,0.0,0.0,0.17428866502824966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941397581523933,0.0,0.09643779695941612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529198840054972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675130462273753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997135035254842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410420974648157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930946476814207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19496186230316956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16266931972444393,0.0,0.19591426476267576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kerfuffle_patrol,2020/03/11,"A redditor's post on a coronavirus thread is making me worry about him/her [I'm new to reddit but this post raised some red flags](https://www.reddit.com/r/CoronavirusNE/comments/fgq2g1/so_is_it_only_affecting_older_people_badly/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share)

I am a little worried about this redditor, reading the posts in this thread raised some red flags and I wonder if anyone else can help!",9.109677419354838,13.669026016129036,5.513145161290325,69.33971774193549,71.09677419354837,7.616129032258066,23.87903225806452,8.472884824447931,2.2712838709677428,351,10,46,7,8,95,48,62,0.092,0.8370000000000001,0.071,0.136,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,1,0,7,6,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,5,6,2,7,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,4,1,23,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23757425686881226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331565143875112,0.2246635858351001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18316832789848664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14696915360574306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197617999028704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14636153429023852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21176814598854968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6299876905180659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21932500181795125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23778426089537974,0.0,0.4453498532750168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Loose_Schedule,2020/03/11,"Trauma Survey - Student Project Hello

I am a senior undergrad student currently working on my thesis. My project revolves around the idea of trauma. Specifically, the ways in which people who have experienced trauma have gone throughout their lives. As someone who has experienced many different forms of trauma throughout their life, I'd like to gain insight other's experiences to make my work more comprehensive and representative of the many experiences that exist. I made a survey to try and help that understanding along. I have made the survey as noninvasive as I possibly could and is anonymous. 

The link to the survey is: [https://s.surveyplanet.com/TEQU\_0oD](https://s.surveyplanet.com/TEQU_0oD)",11.184509345794387,14.353719355140193,9.476717289719627,50.94161799065424,56.38317757009346,10.583644859813083,36.739485981308405,10.686352973137794,4.784197196261684,589,25,70,14,8,180,67,107,0.099,0.805,0.096,-0.079,2,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,2,3,1,5,0,0,8,0,8,1,0,3,0,13,13,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,3,2,9,1,14,9,2,7,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,3,50,15,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987728707157433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16132940804251858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21111092353471808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3953092073973064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543734773978444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22810247396894176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272178504094318,0.09871688462419298,0.0,0.17842372130702006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3823903428038057,0.13487740474148593,0.409716637636494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14008377832260172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277936169245604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712057796390602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13718627560330798,0.0,0.0,0.21035281142575848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038675720417395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2942058869239342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samHandcraftedd,2020/03/11,Am I a sociopath Hi I’m new to this community and I need some help with the meaning sociopath I am 16 years old and for as long as I can remember I have been labeled a troublemaker and a destroyer by my parents I have broken 3 TV sets all by accident and I have been in and out of trouble with the law since I was 13 I guess you could say I have behavioural issues but I would say I’m pretty Normal all my teachers like me to an extent and I’m a likeable person and a lot of people know me I have been labeled a narcissist by my ex’s and I guess I lie but for good reason though sometimes it’s not even intentional it just slips out but any advice or help would do,0.4567816091954029,2.4275585862069,2.991034482758621,90.8357471264368,83.82758620689657,5.797701149425287,22.080459770114945,7.0316486544052195,0.6243701149425287,525,18,118,7,15,182,85,145,0.07200000000000001,0.778,0.15,0.9306,1,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,0,0,3,4,1,0,9,0,16,0,0,2,2,35,24,15,0,5,6,2,0,1,0,2,0,2,0,1,3,12,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,2,20,2,16,17,5,8,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,5,5,84,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17507360617220172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12183531088391505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430451127726502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833384697371367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15027136074665426,0.0,0.0,0.3947310671191396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401750668540252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869970564014635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846194733693096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752879010075325,0.0,0.0,0.1585514400559861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15231588427548184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19515835078362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284527028290913,0.0,0.17303436596223756,0.0,0.0,0.17553928982594788,0.0,0.0,0.1879988486943865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19893657746134166,0.0,0.0,0.12420736002759256,0.15643607299308918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822706785675808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842068742767111,0.0,0.0,0.20295396657202971,0.0,0.0,0.28495130478793745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482034500907138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17719435519364093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17602432091267942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25454101451304856,0.0,0.0,0.11537351375779448
mentalhealth,BlaineTheAlchemist,2020/03/11,"Starting to wonder if I'm crazy or is everyone else around me driving me crazy! I have been a nervous wreck and have had many emotional issues since I was a young kid after my mom died. Things got a lot worse when dad remarried and his wife brought her 3 kids into the house and it was t-total hell and chaos and the step mom wanted nothing to do with me or my sister. She treated me like shit and was a cold uncaring bitch and I'm glad she's dead. She was a horrible woman who just drained dad financially and put on a face for him that she loved all the kids were his kids. Fast forward to now i'm 30. I've gotten much better mentally with the same meds I was given at 15. I noticed that my frustration, anger, torment, and all the negative feelings I have are coming from one person. My stepmom's oldest child. She is a pure sociopath and a pathological liar. She dumps her annoying kid on us constantly and I'm just here trying to care for my elderly father. He won't budge or push back against her at all. My step sister is literally doing exactly what my step mom did. 

Draining him financially and dumping her kids on him while putting on a smile that all is great and dandy. I notice that when I am at work (i work for myself alone in an office space I rent) that all of my mental health issues magically disappear. No dogs barking, no kids, no step family to come and ruin my day, no nothing. Pure. Unadulterated. Silence. I don't have the mood swings or bipolar problems that I had as a kid and my last psychiatrist said she really really doubted I had bipolar and most of the things I was angry about were completely justified and anyone would be pissed about that stuff I went through and continue to go through. I've been through 3 therapists in 3 years and all of them seem to furiously agree w/ me and when I ask em ""What's wrong with me? Am I bipolar? Am I depressed? What is the problem medically with me"" and they just got nothin. They have no diagnosis.",3.544969219404088,5.1303986081425,4.757246983501602,83.53535828613644,73.0966921119593,8.124402856439303,27.18123614873184,8.748949900417786,1.9985576459000245,1555,57,313,30,31,513,208,393,0.244,0.69,0.066,-0.9974,1,1,0,0,0,0,37.0,1,0,3,3,13,26,11,2,19,0,34,10,3,0,9,57,56,31,2,5,8,9,1,1,0,2,6,1,1,11,15,29,0,0,3,0,1,15,8,18,0,1,21,3,55,7,37,32,10,43,1,2,0,1,45,13,4,10,18,213,70,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033747119310927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449130379729882,0.0,0.0,0.09483816984530156,0.09959524851079876,0.0,0.0,0.08191834932759816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422098682788113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086188834262926,0.0,0.0,0.18353984140054047,0.11169925291492257,0.1151257995941284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870585089652248,0.0,0.09175789091848777,0.0,0.11056584939559563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899579026333332,0.119836819467591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179814946816823,0.0,0.0,0.10043111631016166,0.0,0.05386697503376167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06054593369235845,0.0,0.17041052470188567,0.11745451152818502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132410463109982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292635155628093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223883933701873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683972496066847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05204730860135221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057170588841064,0.09615142216793207,0.0,0.0,0.10800912305608193,0.0,0.0,0.1183356610630356,0.10732216294131962,0.2147231619134617,0.0,0.0,0.3743152758064969,0.0,0.0,0.07831501495349913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20444518947759796,0.24258015721815315,0.0,0.0,0.07219044163582912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302169672496023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038779956062225,0.0,0.21419292001065715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649728206937406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133857552762487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096984883107119,0.0,0.0,0.10935599288564972,0.08812632613540608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540557060286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195635774179232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369460681141516,0.14155339421386856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232983951405668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12814772170035427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283672762598473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875842200922208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553197243955292,0.15511657045659852,0.0,0.1085676175868545,0.07567895499761912,0.11647860211552258,0.0,0.06860463703499321
mentalhealth,Lillynn1019,2020/03/11,"I'm Just Tired Just joined and need to vent.

I struggle with depression and anxiety. I clearly remember having my first panic attack at 9 years old (although I had no idea what was happening at the time). I've been fortunate enough to be able work through a lot of things from my past and learn to cope with most of it.

I know it's worth it to fight through everything. I know there are people who love me. I know life is worth living. I'm just so goddamn tired of having to fight through every second of it. Tired of second guessing literally everything. Tired of writing any small moment of happiness off as a manic episode. I'm tired of hating myself.

I'm just tired....",3.0170454545454533,5.162480250000005,3.8969696969696974,86.71545454545458,76.04545454545455,7.127272727272729,25.393939393939394,8.07648339933343,1.5740484848484853,531,19,104,9,12,170,82,132,0.27899999999999997,0.611,0.11,-0.9768,0,0,0,0,2,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,6,9,4,2,3,0,8,8,0,0,1,21,20,6,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,6,0,2,0,1,7,0,3,3,0,10,2,23,16,3,10,0,1,0,1,5,4,0,3,6,68,17,2,0.11410451651632175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759498404169501,0.0,0.08728964281719029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981036020016126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827805287652204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790046762126365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613797645244468,0.0,0.205099563886344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705724345846402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256989891996681,0.0,0.1009022471194306,0.12146637959648765,0.0,0.11265458692884828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881011029744185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18812657455939674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059539448693058,0.0,0.0,0.10075637857556333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700757952605217,0.10298378109374004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08460705318377365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197334956381998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387706494040233,0.0,0.0,0.10892567220999416,0.07910570465392497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12925817386685445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11928681540950617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580597059363521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06653526118488204,0.7868781376982745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306944700211502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347956757298561
mentalhealth,adriondrugs,2020/03/11,"Can’t eat and parents won’t help I am 16 years old and I struggle to eat when I am in a bad mood. I was never medicated but was diagnosed with mild depression after one talk with a doctor when I was 14 but my mom refused to let me go back even though I begged to. I am at the point where I can’t eat food after even talking to my parents, I can’t sit at the dinner table with them anymore, or even spend an hour near them and the rest of my family. I want to gain weight very badly but I know my eating habits prohibit me from doing so and I don’t know how to stop it. I dread the sight of my body, I’m skinny like a stick and it’s disgusting. On days when I’m a little brighter and food isn’t so repulsive to chow down, I struggle to eat more than a few bites even though I want to finish the whole plate. I want to meal prep and spend my pay checks all on groceries but I won’t waste my money knowing I won’t eat half the food I will get. I’m at the point where I don’t have an appetite on a good or bad day, 1 meal is all I can handle and it’s not even a big one, just a school lunch. Please give advice on what to do in my situation without bringing my parents into it, I’ve tried in the past and they say I’m fine yet notice how small my legs have gotten. And if it gets so bad, what I would have to say to my parents to get help from a professional.",2.4380921052631592,2.5613603092105284,4.195236842105263,92.05765789473686,74.19736842105263,7.264210526315789,22.76578947368421,6.961326702584282,0.3916044736842106,1050,23,263,9,20,357,148,304,0.14800000000000002,0.7559999999999999,0.096,-0.9634,4,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,3,1,20,13,1,3,19,0,25,21,3,2,3,38,42,27,0,5,10,5,1,1,0,5,3,2,0,0,7,14,16,2,3,0,5,2,12,9,0,3,4,4,38,3,38,32,6,39,0,1,1,0,16,20,0,3,17,175,45,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924899406896291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042840577144092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062360117089068724,0.27085707535975045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008269502834253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460427832785436,0.0,0.06985044093894052,0.08231376736135926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300825235202698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4979070767024122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678255889626616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645290980463644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941956605479089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271126245441155,0.07779754067993526,0.04609042473772666,0.068021984792117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10871788652086144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986616864513596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13370965134826726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829292115286138,0.0,0.03962086986850155,0.08128249308542969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816987000129661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094982156497369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625485404022726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923317372223488,0.08509974730570734,0.0,0.10990954847292646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602033222946636,0.0,0.07741816215058749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902233705204482,0.1533295174342176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898634326907524,0.0,0.08207650718118673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115866226659187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678023867090062,0.0,0.16956454489436731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303685917903823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935869111282525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055060890486114136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691515982390843,0.14350285587102973,0.0,0.0,0.09875672118300267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09054412571796028,0.0,0.07817653198599263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05761039539452671,0.0,0.0,0.0522250903914872
mentalhealth,catasticllama,2020/03/11,"Trying not to lose my $hit BC job loss Hey. First post and on cell so I am sure I screwing up somehow. Completely unprepared for lay-off last month.  Have anxiety, depression, and ptsd and a horrible past history of homelessness. Have three interviews lined up, but so much rumination.   I work in MH/SA and have a provider,as well.  I see what I am doing and can help EVERYONE but myself.   Any advice?  I am absolutely going to have to discuss financial issues with respective parties,ie car payment, etc.  But I need to calm the f down.  Any takers??",1.862884615384616,4.58556028846154,3.8684615384615375,81.57653846153846,85.53846153846155,8.200000000000001,26.26923076923077,8.841846274778883,2.766926923076924,426,19,79,13,13,144,80,104,0.08800000000000001,0.75,0.162,0.8633,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,4,4,8,1,0,3,0,9,1,0,0,1,13,13,10,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,1,2,0,1,9,4,12,12,2,12,0,3,1,1,5,5,1,1,4,51,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21263934458391945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959552981167447,0.0,0.16646586491070173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281528322810693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18742133139543665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426851070560763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20792919841482105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18509318467482552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366892252658875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14585484904847976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271212227913941,0.2159376155121364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17737566444939654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434423383619398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368881124433302,0.0,0.1599634017730127,0.16135002769204784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077268923346468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20840373019000247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543665152037881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734015902570831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050884561928584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773830005950378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19565142460510454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584177331533029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raul2110,2020/03/11,"my mind spirals so I'm in this psychology class and. , they asked me a question about that went a little bit like this, ""what are some negative thoughts that you've had this week?"" and just because of that my mind spiraled down Idk how and now all I can think of is how to self-harm, and because I don't live with anyone that gives a fuck about it or meet with anyone who's checking on me I do it all the time and I really don't know how to stop, because after I self-harm I feel stupid and guilty and for some reason, I stop eating and feel ugly and fat and the cycle repeats.",3.5679508196721317,3.9470214918032793,4.382090163934424,90.80706967213116,71.78688524590164,7.08360655737705,24.26639344262295,6.6274283507984215,0.5593081967213109,450,11,103,3,8,145,76,122,0.18600000000000005,0.795,0.018000000000000002,-0.96,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,8,3,2,0,5,0,7,3,1,4,2,32,17,15,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,12,2,2,7,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,3,2,12,1,13,14,5,12,0,0,0,1,6,4,1,4,8,70,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537653919689962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696428038457081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318532971898569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981098904469968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856812885968529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18350563538025152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16775902071743154,0.0,0.17407522341864892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997269632101291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886533393488032,0.18187294894169054,0.16023458168402313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3664504935766516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20327936426075835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624942953506667,0.18657352074486244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.378609617973546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30342130384931104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116273748267801,0.0,0.14406083823754112,0.10581215694648333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455581534280385,0.0,0.0,0.16821741863725134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nervous-Pick,2020/03/11,"How do you deal with suicidal thoughts? I just wanna say, I AM NOT going to hurt myself. I just am so overwhelmed emotionally that I think the only way to not feel like this anymore, is to be dead or stop existing. 
I have no one close that I can confide this in, because they would just tell me something is wrong and try to send me to the psych ward, when in fact that would make my problems a whole lot worse. And they would worry so much. I dont want that for them. And if I tell my therapist they are gunna tell my family. 
However, the purpose of this post is just advice on how to deal with these thoughts or maybe activities that would help make it easier to deal with? Any experiences similar? Honestly any reason to have motivation to live life at this point?",4.824078947368419,5.5399690394736885,5.4761578947368434,82.8741052631579,69.1315789473684,9.237894736842106,27.7,9.3871,2.1261768421052643,602,19,125,12,10,195,96,152,0.17300000000000001,0.737,0.09,-0.9356,1,0,1,1,0,3,15.0,0,1,4,1,9,6,0,1,4,0,16,1,0,6,1,36,24,11,2,8,9,0,1,1,0,4,1,1,0,0,11,7,0,1,6,0,0,2,4,4,0,1,2,2,19,2,19,17,3,12,0,2,0,0,14,6,0,4,3,91,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265897055738563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17618984917833874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847365857440954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896932410076403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4006650847906387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182557235445046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14572049403157247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671969843424954,0.12212333362883493,0.0,0.06550175687889462,0.0925468502382066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362331050215631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683116679885873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386804165311128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150134235152824,0.06328905887271058,0.0,0.1143904555444272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013437928324547,0.0,0.0,0.17294435580659112,0.0,0.13014519065253533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952303534073699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778292736962512,0.0985246783885566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246173403089786,0.0,0.1240681346947722,0.0,0.0,0.12395690395446513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319365773749495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301924591794552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972993675308688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083052759411532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170101467774365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33968366595073585,0.0,0.0,0.15041152872448532,0.0,0.08300709430152932,0.0,0.20568824455885226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795243393507403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640889531002774,0.10282665379626882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14463217294726244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315590599960397,0.13201724595891684,0.3680997128942874,0.14163693195288135,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ianrec,2020/03/11,"What does it mean to be ""stoic"" A lot of pekple have called me this including one time today. I was with someone bowling and he said you look the same if you get a gutter or strike, very stoic. Is it a good or bad thing?",0.10574468085106403,2.068952765957448,1.884510638297872,98.294,85.17021276595744,4.611063829787233,15.782978723404256,5.6839178017228535,-0.8467242553191485,168,3,40,1,5,55,41,47,0.10400000000000001,0.835,0.061,-0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,8,8,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,4,1,3,5,2,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,4,2,27,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571939362908053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145352132976243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26956096576826033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093405825604634,0.0,0.0,0.25836271029304064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25866938342941703,0.0,0.0,0.26187787537533697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355372586915145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20873052232548533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29300906494390433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609945980179304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20464283942364592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796159941498246,0.0,0.29197841275749625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541587415396984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,headinthestars888,2020/03/11,"Need advice: best ways to support someone after a hospitalization Someone close to me has suffered from long term severe depression. Over the last few weeks, it escalated heavily. He stopped going to therapy, went through some hard times/triggers, and began planning suicide. He explicitly didn’t want intervention, and we exhausted every option available to us. After a particularly scary night where the threats of self-harm were more intense than ever before, I made the difficult decision to call police before he took his own life. Cops came and he was admitted. I was not present. I haven’t been able to communicate since (due to hospital policy, but I’m guessing he is also still feeling betrayed by my choice).

He could be released as early as tomorrow. 

What’s the best way to respond to the situation once he’s out? I expect anger from him feeling betrayed, but want to still show support if appropriate. Tips and specific phrases are appreciated- particularly from anyone who may have been through either side of this situation. I have no idea how to navigate this situation or conversation. Thank you sincerely ♥️",6.250624249699879,8.992259020408165,6.9676950780312135,65.6428511404562,68.48979591836735,9.917887154861944,36.019207683073226,10.194018383442646,4.5435849939976,912,48,135,26,17,300,142,196,0.168,0.68,0.151,-0.5994,0,0,0,0,0,1,26.0,2,1,0,3,6,12,2,0,7,0,15,2,0,2,2,33,32,12,1,6,6,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,8,0,1,5,1,0,4,4,6,0,0,11,3,12,6,26,18,8,27,0,2,0,0,17,5,0,6,16,88,17,0,0.12616242856537668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328446504500948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089204854250174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821570347548623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21470986881439624,0.0,0.2647993703521393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12882594537039035,0.14429620822432576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073043327920762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086635148557414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412113957273087,0.10629728740725576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758302927897072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170101556801077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389821387427267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301675516815415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14242202530672582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283921795581323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911225436200207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164977918026006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11937794038846446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354784218289906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839489273131028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343588689258867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161492799696667,0.14252763357131376,0.0,0.10436286463584324,0.4254355671180778,0.0,0.0,0.21379403262177674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015069568459251,0.1054774394602493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800121985976502,0.28633525768714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615341376615093,0.14427773222918336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401711002539014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15175786759403598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882773824734072,0.2002837268350433,0.1011998901947667,0.0,0.0,0.1169538352473887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ghostghoul04,2020/03/11,"Will I get in trouble for not going to group therapy tomorrow? I started going to therapy last month because I thought I was bipolar. I see my therapist once a week. I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality disorder and social anxiety and seasonal depression. Not on any medication. There is a DBT group therapy of 6 girls (19-22 years old) that started at the end of February. The first meet was the 26th and then last Wednesday. With another therapist who I’ve never met. I didn’t show up at the last two (they didn’t put me on the list though so it didn’t matter but this week they did).

I currently don’t have a job or any friends (haven’t had friends or a job in months, can’t keep either). And i sit in my house most of the time or take my dogs for walks sometimes (but that causes anxiety if it’s crowded on the walking trail).

I am supposed to see my therapist Thursday and group is tomorrow and I got a group text message as confirmation that group is tomorrow and there’s other girls replying. I never said anything. Someone is bringing their cat and snacks for the group.

I’m scared there might be people I went to school with there at group (I was bullied a lot and virtually had no friends all 4 years and sat alone at lunch a lot, I have RBF so I guess that doesn’t help and a strong fight or flight response and tend to come off rude when I feel uncomfortable and I shut down). There is someone in the group named Rachel and I knew 3 Rachel’s that went to that school that absolutely hated my guts for no reason and made my life hell.  Idk if it’s her because I don’t know the last name. 

I’m also scared they are going to judge me (you know the looks on peoples faces to know they are judging you, that certain look and then the way they look at others after looking at you or if they start whispering) and won’t like me for whatever reason.

I’m having massive anxiety thinking about it, my therapist thinks it would be good for me to try it out so we can use some of what they teach me there in our 1 on 1 sessions and so I can potential try to make friends. She also told me about meet me.com meet ups and I’m too scared to do that, I don’t trust people and I hate driving. Driving gives me massive anxiety.",2.8155100139729896,4.554730769911508,4.007796925943179,87.51449697251982,75.3716814159292,7.589753143921754,26.49650675360969,8.371475516178862,1.7007911504424782,1756,66,370,32,38,573,216,452,0.145,0.77,0.084,-0.9798,3,1,0,0,1,0,40.0,2,3,8,2,17,19,5,3,20,0,36,8,2,6,4,68,80,41,0,4,13,0,1,1,4,4,4,2,0,3,20,26,2,1,10,1,0,12,16,10,0,2,20,9,52,9,49,54,6,66,1,1,6,0,45,22,1,14,31,238,72,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777803525741834,0.0,0.1201139615637888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10214036469791346,0.07874829219133365,0.2298034096355401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06180042556581172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155982142235032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714779366321534,0.0,0.06469150244778896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468302227638106,0.0762243326787567,0.0,0.0,0.08607044412311024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651579735894794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037972524337610315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387953013879592,0.0,0.0,0.2320865091256522,0.0,0.03923634847289195,0.07204220888522052,0.1280421968693498,0.06298983225371882,0.06006386837734608,0.0,0.08273048031116476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14829026303584772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05033755965704725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08665465015028061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490491769585221,0.06675181704051197,0.0,0.0,0.12381803522596772,0.24486420984089885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053044942837051634,0.036689784257112126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25225840142196004,0.0,0.0,0.12769368630746314,0.0,0.07106088909149201,0.0501294474594018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565476698292428,0.0,0.07966861906601735,0.0,0.0,0.11988728458204605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584260823011736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880421049168766,0.0799784336380069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619345031430773,0.0655739187247933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549566188699827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544294275771406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07143674808451138,0.0,0.2255628683964845,0.1520092492188862,0.11968903263945015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655440341572653,0.12726299340666924,0.0,0.07427524881983756,0.0,0.15946727265345048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056465419238340274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576482027151983,0.3487848697376238,0.0,0.0962413546979147,0.07378480098784435,0.059620552521301814,0.04379107700468782,0.0,0.0,0.07176071620470516,0.0,0.10197515600464063,0.0,0.0733612230936278,0.0,0.0,0.06486178836525686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05961042573335841,0.12048045308539085,0.0,0.0,0.13923583349310992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05334847480651871,0.0,0.0,0.09672313130081778
mentalhealth,Bob_the_bldr69,2020/03/11,"Long term happiness Hello, I have a question it is not news on mental health or an opinion on mental health. I want to know what it's like to have long term happiness because for me it's always been short term start working out for 2 days take a shower feel happy then school drains me. I just wonder what it feels like and would like someone to describe it to me.",3.1311261261261296,4.763429229729732,3.7308108108108087,90.28153153153154,74.27027027027026,6.014414414414415,23.144144144144143,6.42735559955562,0.5051063063063066,289,8,59,2,6,91,49,74,0.0,0.75,0.25,0.9565,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,14,12,3,0,2,3,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,6,6,9,10,3,12,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,4,11,35,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14270409929298444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454653767899584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060514186924926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734339750671243,0.12252166110925905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5477038776023263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3645989920571418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425347409667023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513628698275768,0.0,0.0,0.30354922795034883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3456690438463704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19212242784700528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17357002726895682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14531379734740654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139059083661187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289487897258047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115681682101388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18598751103972896,0.12485610801518987,0.0,0.0,0.12183069483609092,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rainie-rue,2020/03/11,"How do I stop being “lazy?” I got really mad at myself tonight because I procrastinated studying, but I started thinking I do this a lot. My mom gets mad because I don’t do chores etc. I just don’t feel like getting out of bed, I watch YouTube/Netflix all day on my phone but the thing is I don’t even enjoy it. I feel really pathetic and tell myself to get up and I really feel like/think I want to but I just don’t. I don’t know if this belongs in this subreddit because I don’t know if it’s about my mental health but I didn’t know where else to go. My dad is lazy and I was always scared that maybe it’s genetic and I got it from him and I just always feel bad about myself for being so lazy. Lately I’ve been wondering if it’s my schooling, I’m going into nursing and I’m really stressed that I’m not smart enough for it but I don’t know what else I would want to do for a career. I’m just really stressed right now, I have a test in the morning that I completely procrastinated studying for (yes, I should be doing it right now. But I’m stressed and feel like I should talk about this with someone?) and I’m just really mad at myself",1.0155090137857885,2.7772427601626006,3.2113856486390984,91.08866914103923,80.7479674796748,6.3920820077766,21.26475786496995,7.423996415210882,0.5949797101449277,893,26,204,13,23,305,109,246,0.204,0.737,0.06,-0.9891,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,14,12,3,4,5,1,24,1,0,1,1,46,51,19,0,8,15,2,5,2,0,3,1,0,2,0,16,11,0,1,11,0,0,2,9,8,0,0,5,6,35,4,22,40,4,20,0,0,1,0,6,11,0,5,9,135,51,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18085355994108765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907395614802492,0.1987428561523914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394426739505158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008675207631604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815689874044707,0.0,0.0,0.11229091451192497,0.12120198752180344,0.07177918897155082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747481673706663,0.2329135465409264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17033549955329078,0.0,0.12352566160097375,0.0,0.17383556189361613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551704889900825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23890100440914125,0.0,0.12259077641553702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592801821060243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923920832490752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917921694833624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951941368674012,0.0,0.0,0.1272795140030579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4177221172282175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18561668579320886,0.0,0.0,0.10880320407076206,0.10998547864492116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208045770598354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692112772135525,0.0,0.0,0.09085764260162643,0.3734624944128869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734930652370762,0.0949872381573584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219921969069586,0.13926983412231264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819933362130298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785401976105304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772000067985662,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BinkyBunny99,2020/03/11,"I think there's more to my illness (long) (UK) This has all stemmed from taking sertraline again. I went to the GP for sleeping all the time, being sad, not wanting to do anything. (I already 'have' borderline personality disorder). She suggested sertraline and I said last time I was on sertraline I got crazy suicidal for no reason and ended up in hospital. She still wanted me to try it again and I've ended up with the exact same symptoms. 
A few things like this has happened at my doctors so I'm really reluctant to open up. Ever since I was a child I've thought that I'm in a book or film. Sometimes I'll forgot about it though. I'm in that state right now. I've just wrote down everything and I'm just going to hand her the paper instead of trying to explain. I've also wrote that I think people can hear my thoughts, that I want to hurt myself and that other people want to hurt or kill me, that I see things and hear things like the earth isn't real, that I think there are 2 of me. After reading it all back to myself I'm a bit worried that I might actually be ill. I'm even more worried that she'll just say okay and suggest CBT and a different anti depressant. I can't keep doing this. Is there anything I can say or do to try and get more help from her. I think this is happening to keep the 'audience entertained'. There is still a part of me that thinks these symptoms are obviously something going wrong in my head but more and more I think actually maybe it's all not real. Is there anything I can do. Thankyou",2.5581923536439675,4.401920164516131,4.075519713261652,86.29290919952211,76.38709677419354,7.173237753882916,25.02986857825568,8.045849151850463,1.4554133811230583,1201,42,246,20,27,399,153,310,0.102,0.858,0.039,-0.9367,1,0,1,0,0,3,29.0,0,0,0,0,21,10,1,0,12,1,24,8,3,1,7,51,60,17,2,4,9,0,1,2,0,2,5,5,0,2,23,12,0,3,10,4,0,3,5,6,0,0,10,7,32,4,32,46,13,30,0,4,1,0,18,12,0,4,16,171,55,4,0.0,0.0,0.1811711939485771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243671668926436,0.07423358349981661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291657185477569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137810345618192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013428579047183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995161382840947,0.0,0.0,0.0969842815854902,0.10638759087612036,0.0950121953048488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16443404024036226,0.0,0.0,0.0613112466414556,0.08396718339996627,0.0,0.0,0.08342677051619507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04849818809853351,0.0,0.10551125491217228,0.0,0.07424209692965306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417292080964058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526710951510403,0.0,0.2092451707788092,0.0,0.06221986835383748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19874608571848876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501750569303336,0.10269913545867793,0.0,0.0,0.07566625698914968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090701001874596,0.0,0.0,0.08214882466205901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932570288735572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847459876862846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005224124523518,0.0,0.12870887375152176,0.08105280864426408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285195161717827,0.21131451293082512,0.059467245134986225,0.09544144292325628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927360678279283,0.08829957375222659,0.14763924418462215,0.0,0.0,0.07397096626218909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678731414558734,0.0,0.09289386978574496,0.0,0.0,0.07146262988827143,0.09180810978928378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482632548640786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015374871015816,0.0,0.0,0.192965241080382,0.06979422473973501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850100661153201,0.3568781121073414,0.0912018905019574,0.14738827048160688,0.10825614371724837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890699755371186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21900668078156305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605140266136523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885403063319376,0.0,0.0,0.10149156789017773,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,schampersand,2020/03/11,"I miss my antidepressants I’m 26, in college and working part-time. I aged out of my parents health insurance in January and haven’t been able to afford new insurance, meaning I’ve been off of my antidepressants and unable to see my therapist. I feel like every day is getting harder and I’ve been struggling in school and work since. I feel stuck, don’t know what to do, and have little motivation to get up and do anything about it :-(",4.8812156862745075,6.114309141176469,5.760882352941178,78.99230392156866,69.35294117647061,8.960784313725489,30.637254901960784,9.2995712137729,2.6843725490196078,347,14,66,7,6,114,54,85,0.107,0.838,0.055,-0.5095,2,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,1,0,0,9,1,0,1,0,13,19,7,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,3,8,1,13,15,0,10,0,1,1,0,1,7,0,0,4,39,10,5,0.22626712775657115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18619856693492248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14592357879054432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19063981395611065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22881491672044085,0.16164528127960429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364304708430128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405113760773322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435049601841212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054268942777347,0.2267791045193833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24647123460837744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21853020194701306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251242868464419,0.24502524978973106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22899441311507684,0.1803056059182014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871705062602176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23654352979162266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627135748627274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32945032767053833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mentalhealthrelief,2020/03/11,"Terrible BDD, OCD, and anxiety ruining my life; worsened by acne Hey what's up guys this is a throwaway account. I hav",1.4481159420289842,4.115035260869568,4.330434782608695,77.67072463768119,87.69565217391305,8.284057971014493,33.7536231884058,8.841846274778883,4.039475362318841,93,6,16,3,3,33,23,23,0.377,0.623,0.0,-0.8271,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,9,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.53241330966385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6891173446609585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4915824986512589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saltzy27,2020/03/11,"Smash bros makes me feel terrible I play my roommate and best friend in smash several nights a week. We're around the same skill level, always have been since we were kids. I have anxiety, depression, a plethora of other issues and I dread every single time I play him. Because no matter what, at some point in the night I will get so very frustrated at the game which causes me to play terribly which causes me to get even more frustrated.  No matter what I try to do I always end up like this. I always end up yelling at myself and getting very depressed after. I literally feel emotional pain from playing this dumb game. I have tried breathing while playing and it doesn't help. I've looked at videos telling me how to get less frustrated at things and they don't help. I've tried so hard to look at it in so many different ways to make it not seem terrible. I come back to it every time hoping ""this will be the time I don't get mad"" and he'll spike me, or read me, or do some whack ass combo and it'll just hurt on the inside. I don't want this to happen. I hate this so much. I hate myself so much for feeling this way every single time. 

I don't even want advice on how to get better at the game. I don't even care about getting better as much as I care about not getting angry at this game. The thing is, I don't get angry at anyone else I play in smash. Nobody. Literally no one makes me feel frustrated or angry or depressed when I play them. I can get oh so very clapped in tournaments and feel disappointed but nothing compared, to what I feel when I play my friend. I hate it so fucking much. I should be happy to have someone I can play against so often who's near my skill level. I should be happy he's so supportive of me and is never trying to be mean about anything. He says he looks at me as his rival, and is always trying to keep up with me. But I simply never believe it, I feel so stupid playing him. I just want to enjoy the game when I play against him. I don't care about getting better at the game, I don't care about if I won a bunch or not, I just want to enjoy the game. 

Outside the game I never feel the slightest bit sad over how many games I lost the night prior. I never feel like I should've won more games and that would make me happy.  I only feel scared to ever play him again because I just know how angry and sad I get after. But I keep coming back to play, hoping that I can get over this stupid feeling one day. I'm starting to really lose hope. I feel like I'll never be able to get over this. I really want help but I also feel like no one understands me. Everyone I talk to just says it's okay and that I should feel happy to play against him. I hate this shit so fucking much. I really hope one of you guys can help me in some way. It legitimately makes me depressed that I can't enjoy one of my favorite games of all time with my best friend.",2.3211209259823318,3.7639183598673283,3.6903164449859567,90.52339019189768,76.01492537313433,6.448153788878736,21.261346329576604,7.043009809895983,0.40323043963854177,2253,54,494,23,49,740,210,603,0.182,0.599,0.218,0.9846,1,0,0,0,1,0,53.0,1,1,2,11,38,76,15,2,16,1,37,6,3,11,7,95,108,46,0,14,18,1,15,4,3,8,1,3,0,2,32,19,0,2,18,27,0,2,22,31,0,5,5,21,84,45,70,90,19,64,0,10,3,3,40,30,5,15,33,329,116,1,0.04925538287803252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04813179008803451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03938951189208292,0.16393769728390994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037680233083783335,0.0,0.0,0.034440508953015696,0.050467960490397035,0.04053298327801054,0.04384773350903776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757486981597365,0.0,0.06005124846102685,0.0,0.0,0.055493949439739385,0.10338097102972184,0.13068715037816064,0.053774121070491385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200876582173365,0.10119769247079106,0.0,0.0848583019595317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03176564716017292,0.0,0.16969435639291947,0.0,0.0,0.05146139163369665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041146552081911376,0.0554056761444972,0.0872512989154968,0.0,0.0,0.09759814755708286,0.0445543137370682,0.12449935332595942,0.04706562913302116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486700215851478,0.10556416610927187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416375988492365,0.09107161556015074,0.360274664579399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04877057296951686,0.04355637241064416,0.2097330838951544,0.04412314831555155,0.19451797287457245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13205937953693794,0.0,0.0,0.195686836018866,0.0,0.0,0.052728906094993255,0.0,0.0,0.051409822774443406,0.0,0.08756089490026647,0.0,0.0,0.027069470290221026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625476835486624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408634899713022,0.05510417440151979,0.0537680688758009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643917527270148,0.09987445460057184,0.0,0.05365355166446375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810418690617246,0.0,0.1899439388678747,0.0,0.0,0.13866852053967196,0.0,0.047261868296494536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16688361088741516,0.0374609382113018,0.052411200144931266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04656225756645727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04926871208416048,0.0,0.09466277858348583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833971486184113,0.049313230931927424,0.0,0.0,0.04484025066935442,0.0,0.055644562664843786,0.05055994270542908,0.0407445617077908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041733926072798036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03486321351713579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055894424787296317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03958961099661979,0.04305137565428128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544617548940368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360604928738646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16720585882968447,0.0,0.0,0.051276590660406414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192254794612015,0.14526050492214707,0.11728989083767505,0.03950969710586278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03498961079058045,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AmericanBloodMage,2020/03/11,"Is it normal to have to seek out mental therapy while in an academic program? I am in a 1 year accelerated post bacc medical program. We have an exam every friday, 1-2 exams on monday a month. We meet to discuss cases (that don't really help the students learn the material IMO) We have work for a managerial class as well as must study for another class that ties the information we are learning together. I've reached out to teachers when I struggling (upon their own advice) just to get wishy washy advice/anwers/belittled/brushed off etc.

I understand I signed up for this program but myself and many of my classmates did not expect for this to be as intense as it has. Many of my classmates have turned to therapy/psychotropic drugs whenever they can to keep from taking drastic measures upon themselves due to the rigor of this program.

Is this normal?",4.976846153846154,7.078588800000002,6.025000000000002,73.78769230769231,70.375,8.673076923076923,31.68269230769231,9.265573868473778,3.220846153846153,688,31,112,15,13,228,108,160,0.025,0.945,0.031,-0.2017,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,4,0,2,1,3,2,0,1,9,0,14,2,0,0,1,20,19,8,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,8,7,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,13,1,30,16,2,16,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,0,6,83,21,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19239165562297572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20644884896372692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283216155440079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195764364911824,0.0,0.0,0.16588230402789966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286317016357692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196643332392174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17499853534306348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3992166433016703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19833877189736135,0.1984116191131929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15715002331234054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3858068081750393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18855935982926586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612820386302628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058247168335991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803141101379372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251527129794248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21415201920330285,0.0,0.2049620044011136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17702133901148456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14333306952690636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678610906700274
mentalhealth,devinci337,2020/03/11,"I keep getting fantasies of revenge and they are getting darker. I was abused as a child and never brought the abuser to the police, my whole life I've felt like he stole a huge part of me and got away with it. 

Lately I've been thinking about it alot and it's put me in a very dark place, the only thoughts that calm me are about violence towards him (I have no contact with him and no idea where he lives) and violence towards my self.

What can I do to stop these thoughts? I would never hurt anyone but these thoughts are making me really depressed and are becoming more intrusive.

Any advice is more than welcome.",3.509999999999998,5.2934131147541015,3.8696393442622967,89.04872131147543,73.59016393442623,6.519344262295082,26.95409836065573,7.1686216300943375,1.2715613114754096,488,18,97,5,10,152,81,122,0.147,0.7509999999999999,0.102,-0.7024,0,0,0,0,2,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,0,7,0,11,1,0,1,2,23,22,9,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,7,9,0,2,6,1,0,2,4,2,0,0,8,1,14,3,14,13,5,13,0,2,0,0,9,7,0,1,5,70,21,0,0.0,0.3927141766931401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619446038466831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126987190532089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587881041766647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15570414271014854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18303030077815824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273874538431594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912204012210096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731690003770109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254546422518745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17741209693643745,0.1870834128121452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14730404178973014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18694507835706808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705650606725372,0.08096488984241104,0.0,0.14633825809931975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106227598115308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556347551318981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604137072937352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17946408270441885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17314740769614154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16659945191898606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061677126398833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288737366055745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855356505717364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618992233363432,0.0,0.3947015414484341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13674052492818156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18502610338851005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772632282876246,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Whysleeplol,2020/03/11,"No empathy?? I am a 16 yr old highschool student. A number of events over the past few years have led me to believe I cannot empathize. While I can understand why people feel the way they do occasionally, I cannot feel for them. This has affected me greatly because I can often be seen as insensitive and mean (perhaps rightfully).

When someone is crying, I must pretend I care and feel for them even when I understand the circumstances.

I do not ""get"" people who are affected by trauma of some kind, and I cannot feel for them either.

Time and time again, I find myself understanding people but not really feeling for them.

I cannot comfort people, and I am often not at all connected to them.

Lastly, I cannot recall ever feeling people's pain only understanding it. I thought people were faking it when they were sad for people until I discovered ""amable"" empathy.

What could this be??

(Originally posted on the wrong subreddit)",5.2889906625166745,7.024719393063588,6.447398843930639,72.54040907069813,68.94219653179191,9.253712761227213,30.07069808803913,9.661875296680813,3.1196415295686966,737,29,122,17,13,247,101,173,0.201,0.767,0.032,-0.9781,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,7,0,8,9,0,0,6,0,21,1,0,4,3,34,36,12,0,2,5,0,6,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,13,1,0,1,9,5,0,0,4,7,26,4,15,28,4,22,0,1,1,0,8,4,0,3,15,97,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150627083099005,0.0,0.0,0.13215929659462794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195973077713316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365618114431933,0.0,0.12885084774010666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747693012964836,0.10610646427573776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35586879492432594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10721199343823648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0612855052955977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932597833138326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12215208524232506,0.0,0.09561686684016163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777637416992538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308882063121696,0.0,0.0,0.08921353217356659,0.12481770381753013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197812656622347,0.5692575404574209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234298560869027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514672835262079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017535167329036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938968787763933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931247638855877,0.13679959456598806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4884624880273656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310894627410532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584689923133446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128251430935006,0.0,0.07553870589714118
mentalhealth,Spiderman1738,2020/03/11,"How to move past sexual assault? I’m a guy and I was sexually assaulted by a kid who lived down the street from me when I was younger. He was a lot bigger than me but my age. My parents walked in on it happening and they didn’t believe me. He told him I was participating in it and I was crying saying no I wasn’t. I got the Bible thrown at me and they started making me go to youth at church. So I had to surpress all the feelings I had about it. I didn’t let it effect me. Because that was my first sexual experience it messed me up and that’s what lead to my porn problem. I distracted my feelings with that. Long story short since 18 ive felt the desire to hook up with guys. I’m not gay, I find no attraction to them. But I keep wanting to have sex and be controlled during. And I hate it. I’ve never enjoyed any time that I’ve done it. And I hate myself after. And then I say I won’t do it again but I always end up doing it again. I want it to stop. I want to stop feeling the need to. I want to stop wanting to do it because it makes me upset that I continue to feel the need to do something I don’t like. And if I was actually gay I’d be like okay but I’ve thought it through and I know I’m not. I just want the sex. It’s like if the guy talks to me too much when I get there I snap out of it and become uncomfortable with it again. I’ve had sex with girls and I’ve never been effected by the past. This has messed me up and i don’t know how to move past it.",-0.9095328747400409,0.994925000000002,1.882019676851705,96.9900939849624,89.27355623100306,5.043705007198849,17.776435770276755,6.4704718818221325,-0.3028711246200606,1131,30,284,13,38,393,150,329,0.16699999999999998,0.752,0.081,-0.9859,1,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,3,5,12,15,4,2,12,1,28,6,0,8,3,63,58,26,0,12,9,1,5,3,0,1,0,2,0,5,25,19,0,5,11,0,0,5,12,9,0,1,19,7,49,6,39,35,3,42,1,0,0,6,17,14,0,3,26,194,74,1,0.0,0.0,0.1042954955821804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892933962478629,0.0,0.0,0.07267930077458726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030115605526976,0.1180360734609447,0.0,0.12041258011086295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987044901799455,0.0,0.0,0.11739819615904992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937118810119488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466035600734896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454517237534597,0.0,0.0,0.2161587361208936,0.0,0.10261765804489706,0.0,0.09768266842645798,0.09090861576670484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05583826492869544,0.0,0.06074005685300171,0.0,0.08547844857208606,0.0,0.0,0.3174719361678333,0.09451003641271748,0.0,0.0,0.21103571856240294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949962417362838,0.0,0.0,0.11747243772654332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928788466771364,0.0,0.15664255007884315,0.0,0.09437340871823163,0.09458183934091556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086209807067093,0.0,0.0,0.14268103311912925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271844101292871,0.07856610957375627,0.15849430325781813,0.1648586196254568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186730779729038,0.0,0.30607551984431075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226583594466004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699840664955186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08840887790927429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227831629700139,0.0,0.0,0.07564733692477213,0.0,0.0,0.26805920189990684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590282821490186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484755428196132,0.06232021720854172,0.0,0.0,0.10212453601995228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3782291733597237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MyGFsOlderSister,2020/03/12,"Sleep deprivation or Schizophrenia Hi Reddit, it's been a while since it started; I've been feeling several symptoms of schizophrenia and knowing my father suffered from it, I've been wondering if I might have it.

however, I have also also been wonder if it is in fact sleep deprivation or just schizophrenia. I've heard that insomnia is a symptom of schizophrenia sometimes as well and it starts developing in young adulthood which is the state my body has currently entered.",8.837857142857146,9.737356595238099,7.959619047619048,67.91871428571432,60.42857142857143,10.529523809523807,41.8,10.355215969177356,4.76146,390,21,58,8,5,121,54,84,0.106,0.851,0.043,-0.7351,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,11,6,3,0,1,13,18,10,0,2,5,1,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,8,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,5,2,4,1,6,12,0,9,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,7,5,43,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247399802048895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255302448312884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10266247687764872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158476995458873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21539199474916795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22937595961836585,0.0,0.16795572637070835,0.0,0.4063707019539602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20081048462178835,0.0,0.2874237004624845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4220699420285278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825561922092399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44037365906553605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ouchimstoned,2020/03/12,"Help me help myself ! Trigger warning: self harm 

I’ve been cutting myself since I was 11. I have months where I feel great and months where I lose it and contemplate suicide. I can’t bring myself to tell my parents, but I’m 18 now so I don’t have to. How do I even begin to get help? I tried searching for therapists but the process just feels so overwhelming. I just really need to get diagnosed with something. I was going to get help from the mental health services my university provides, but they closed because of the coronavirus. I’m stuck at home, lonely, depressed and in such a horrible place mentally. I’m genuinely scared for myself. I don’t know what to do. I’ve had enough of feeling this way. I know this is a lot and I’m probably not being very articulate (I’m freaking out) but if you have any advice I’d really appreciate it , thanks !",2.3792121848739503,4.759648160714288,3.85697478991597,85.01155462184876,79.29761904761905,7.286274509803923,25.358543417366942,8.313332769828598,1.8472698879551817,673,26,131,14,17,222,103,168,0.184,0.687,0.129,-0.8734,1,2,1,0,0,2,21.0,0,1,1,1,10,10,1,2,5,0,14,2,0,2,0,24,33,12,1,2,8,1,3,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,5,7,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,8,0,0,5,3,21,2,15,27,2,14,0,4,0,0,9,7,0,2,4,82,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14494352853488865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086751650211744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041882536413644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127753916606154,0.1505488874467362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326154789857208,0.0,0.09796865273116752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22499592026594006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23248436827755564,0.0,0.08429771092544604,0.0,0.0,0.1635311548749316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576647745713826,0.0,0.0,0.3976821225888775,0.0,0.14878417832256902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16303339361609814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16594008783279635,0.0,0.12610239887950356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989576661572441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23678655723892494,0.0,0.0,0.10998266754748076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646996947303381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497025298791214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599217044189178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900442808340966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485013061358436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15473751753540882,0.0,0.0,0.12269771250421135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11418945061942715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224577639437934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964442594383765,0.1365596682152317,0.0,0.1722191990796139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007043665990965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238539417816775,0.0,0.11773515043030988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NeatCress,2020/03/12,"calling for a citizen scientist movement or maker movement of fighting the OCD  

You ,your friend or your family member may suffering OCD.

I am calling for a citizen scientist movement or maker movement of fighting the OCD , across displine ,bring the hacker ,maker , geek ,brain scientist , surgical doctor , pro bono , sufferer and the family ,therapist, designer ,engineer under one roof , rethink and reinvent the current therapy , portable device, methodology to detect, predict ,control and prevent it , even cure it .

Spired by the technology like

\*brain-machine interface of Nureualink 

\*none invasive medical device

\*Bio Nano technology , Bio NEMS, Bio Nano probe 

\*AI algorithm

\-generative medicine

\-gene editing  , CRISPER 29

\-tissue engineering

\-cell therapy 

\-3D printing artifitial issue and organ

\-Sanofi , Real World Evidence base platform, latest drug ,therapy, device could be pass through and use ASAP

The movement will break the silo, boundaries ,fast and agile to answer the critical and  impressing question and respond to the impressing demand of patient, invent the cost effective and easily accessible solution in future 12 months.

We need key members to join us to have it started .

We have to save our-beloved and ourselves by can-do DIY spirit, critical thinking and disruptive innovation by combining medical with big data, AI , Nano technology and emerging technology. We can’t wait and see our be-loved struggling with the symptom. We are willing to pay , donate for the problem solving solution.

We love to see an open source device, therapy share by people in the are which heath care  in future 1-2 years.

We need a discuss forum to brain storm and then have a project developed and cordinated by Slack alike. We need your idea, advice and voulanteer contribution.",12.588106772120607,12.348266705882347,11.406043005437471,50.05412629757791,53.22145328719725,14.762333168561545,51.43870489372219,13.596283718651351,7.74880405338606,1454,89,174,47,14,464,186,289,0.087,0.7709999999999999,0.141,0.9545,1,0,2,0,4,0,69.0,9,4,0,2,1,15,2,1,19,0,12,8,2,6,0,50,24,20,0,5,3,0,0,1,1,3,5,0,0,2,4,26,0,3,6,0,3,7,2,7,0,1,0,2,14,8,29,19,1,26,1,2,2,1,26,9,0,5,10,101,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342016605429685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3887103414011917,0.2370365173045444,0.0,0.1183389152203306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017997051650346,0.0926707388889422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188003693453958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460186443602762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666172455716183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188368906696842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967373801422968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310264821620524,0.0,0.12114468681165667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05670489187270436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475577208420124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338523089347287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926442557074898,0.0,0.0,0.2581885347159982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865058342509787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080466837392033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106126336544317,0.0,0.0,0.1300225626584251,0.0,0.0,0.1321106311862225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849821085511831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215342622968334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213393246487431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063894449349075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5309348372934765,0.1347637273274059,0.0,0.07437159583147401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13961534031297082,0.10024536176467612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474389415275838
mentalhealth,Ignilio09,2020/03/12,how do you open up about mental health to your parents? My mental health hasn't been the best for a couple of month even years... even if it seems like it's getting a little better. I have had suicidal thoughts/tendencies for a while and I think I might be depressed but don't want to self diagnose and that's exactly why I want to see a therapist. My issue is that I need to talk to my parents first. I'm really close to my mom and usually I'd open up about everything but this topic is particularly though; my mother already had to go through the depression and suicide of her first husband and I just don't want to put her in that same position again. But at the same time I don't trust my father and absolutely don't feel like opening up to him.,3.1843939393939387,4.611299798701303,4.5864285714285735,85.0377380952381,73.74025974025976,8.25021645021645,26.46969696969697,8.841846274778883,1.892941125541125,595,21,125,12,12,198,91,154,0.16899999999999998,0.787,0.044000000000000004,-0.9592,2,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,2,0,4,8,7,0,0,7,0,14,3,0,1,1,27,25,13,2,5,5,6,1,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,6,10,0,0,3,0,0,2,5,2,0,2,3,2,18,5,21,20,3,20,0,2,1,0,13,10,0,3,10,88,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15098361528021018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358352411169234,0.12100564491709813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138806891752116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356847055127377,0.1388688157113029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18073585281621524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296445874868304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918000196284017,0.09774381003201348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327570314312856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071482491925902,0.0,0.07775762067675271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908652583947356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428039116751946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368610021057842,0.13712898722376488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27576355927412466,0.14514376696060066,0.0,0.16024123314136035,0.10920794347204928,0.0,0.0,0.10144985492830164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30384351479591104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375412914636146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765001409085271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902735145167183,0.1245552474314944,0.14273247827123042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993164440357581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099702548445094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15885787417324132,0.0,0.08766834998527698,0.13442437041540325,0.0,0.07978049513391501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068724454095803,0.0,0.2420988892236583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345823181503783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810721080524983
mentalhealth,AlexandraTheOrange,2020/03/12,"Help please?! Im scared! I've been crying for a while and I have theese thoughts in my head that I can't get out. I have epilepsy and I feel like i'm scared to get a seizure all the time. Even though i have had epilepsy for 4 years this didn't start until last year. Everytime I think about going to school or something i get a mini panic attack. My school has been shut down due to the virus but my mom said that I had to go there tomorow to get my books. Im freaking out and i tried to explain it to her, but she was like ""your brother is also going to get his books so you can do it too"". I feel like she doesn't understand what im going through. And I just can't stop thinking about it. Im scared. this thoughts have been going on for months and they are only getting worse by time. It sometimes feels like im loosing grip on reality. And since my mom is now angry at me and my dad lives hours away, im alone with these thoughts. 

This was one of my first times posting to reddit. Hopefully i didn't post it to the wrong subreddit. Anyways it was good to get out all of that emotion.",1.2690681444991796,2.9622178362068965,2.451330049261085,97.16477011494251,79.6896551724138,5.28111658456486,21.392446633825944,5.916634753146586,-0.08805361247947507,846,24,200,5,21,270,127,232,0.139,0.765,0.096,-0.8873,0,1,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,1,1,11,13,1,4,6,0,23,1,1,0,2,29,49,15,0,1,4,4,4,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,14,11,0,1,10,2,0,5,5,7,0,2,14,5,27,6,31,35,2,32,0,0,0,0,14,10,0,2,19,125,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915137511539327,0.0,0.06883695232517845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792673036756296,0.0808735924749705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945531998950554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682673646102263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0568540431847206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305716411379833,0.18448351148955813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321833554517873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148072763324398,0.0,0.24460200093185905,0.07219856914830837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834138359850256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05769660993885025,0.0,0.0,0.08549538160438074,0.08476999189539303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5578773633920859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016547335344069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16821444547137915,0.0,0.07600890023236398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20162821813236653,0.06870704442452898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058329025238922076,0.0654665847287674,0.0,0.1009945833337516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944883536850416,0.0,0.0,0.16487883411510465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188037357418715,0.0,0.25853881124207795,0.17423209267658046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07120503192509027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626744142916076,0.08513384614721298,0.0,0.06092681151664527,0.0,0.0,0.07196548763154928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031126538162894,0.08457169777429506,0.20501016258614155,0.15057921198139995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058441657080106874,0.0,0.0,0.08961076330061206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772135427982057,0.0,0.0941133364561477,0.0,0.11086347484360416
mentalhealth,throwwawwayuk,2020/03/12,"When you can’t turn to anyone I’m not doing well. A mixture of things I’m unhappy about in my life (eg work, loneliness, anxiety, no self confidence etc). This week especially I’ve spent all my evenings crying and I don’t really know what to do. I wish I didn’t exist and I’m tempted to hurt myself just to see if it’ll help me stop crying (even though I know self harm isn’t helpful at all). 

The worst of it is, all those issues I have, they’re not even that big of a deal. So many people have it so much worse than me. I know I’m just being stupid.

I don’t want to call up samaritans over this because they’ve got more serious things to deal with. I’m not so close to any of my friends that I could tell them how I feel. I don’t want to tell my family because I don’t want them to worry about me. 

I’m not really sure what to do but I feel like if I don’t change something things are only going to get worse.",2.3155863539445605,2.8202543930348263,4.098837953091685,91.24757462686571,74.72139303482588,7.732906894100925,21.81982942430704,7.957251820313856,0.6416336886993608,707,15,173,10,14,240,109,201,0.179,0.735,0.085,-0.9343,0,0,1,0,0,2,20.0,0,1,2,1,14,9,1,0,3,0,18,1,0,1,4,29,39,11,0,7,9,0,2,1,1,1,1,0,0,2,13,4,0,1,5,0,1,1,13,5,1,0,3,3,24,4,23,33,7,10,0,1,1,0,13,6,0,2,4,109,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497300668944432,0.0,0.09558947004923296,0.0,0.0,0.08737074401117483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234160052621454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759200744889745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132184766544176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976560355399768,0.0,0.27451220914991803,0.0,0.2576441801379886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935674310631804,0.2475928209367559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11779551312149066,0.0,0.12636099642282805,0.08926716449388902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653915252207187,0.0,0.06528330912302929,0.0,0.07101423929895608,0.0,0.09993713072235376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750806818123518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376584424753502,0.0,0.0,0.13041951474681834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20601435615874467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825870743392908,0.06104621404739405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266837464287557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091855569374282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503314969424967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662737229405504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600974675158908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995721623004238,0.0,0.2607085525371943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619569597656218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044671413247474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177676687722562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21843061185597107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24904166136144265,0.0,0.12276667322390115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359140734894493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22110332471220254,0.0,0.10023056385446147,0.0,0.11234865479725796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436909364337372,0.0,0.0,0.09096800215857057,0.12689685515066393,0.2546776077351501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BBWonderlandKathyrin,2020/03/12,"Sliding scale prices for the unemployed AND uninsured Back story: I found a clinic in my area that takes walk ins, most insurance, and has a sliding fee scale for those without insurance. My question is what would then the price be for someone who has no income AND no insurance? An article I read about the clinic in the local newspaper mentioned something about a $5 starting fee. Does that mean that without insurance or income that I would be paying $5 for each visit? Any insight will help, thanks in advance!",8.546105263157893,8.203849294736841,7.843157894736844,72.67210526315792,61.31578947368421,10.547368421052632,39.0,9.888512548439397,3.980957894736842,413,19,68,7,5,129,61,95,0.047,0.8859999999999999,0.067,0.4314,4,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,8,0,8,2,0,0,0,14,13,5,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,4,1,5,5,4,0,0,0,1,0,5,1,12,7,2,14,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,3,3,50,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706876678192609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19300244455326912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196505826663332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27520703002736946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682390832847658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734110785209736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28117589666635306,0.0,0.2510665424818765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126703150955764,0.1932309993513474,0.0,0.0,0.17765811419228722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18871972409211524,0.0,0.0,0.2310858053627268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4839074230230486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566044344317988,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AlTheToyCollector,2020/03/12,"I know the coronavirus isn’t all that bad, but damn my anxiety is like WACK I recognize that the media is making COVID-19 out to be more dangerous than it actually is, but for some reason I’m still super anxious about it. The virus is literally in my city right now and I feel like I could contract it at any second. I don’t think I’m going to die or anything if I do get it, it’s just... Damn that’s the thing, I don’t know why I’m so anxious over it. I’m young and have minor to mild asthma, so it could be severe, but I would probably be fine idk. I guess it’s just the idea that I could possibly get it. Damn, another thought just came in my mind. I’m practically a no one at my school, but if I got the virus and people found out, everyone would probably either be asking me questions, or make fun of me. I seriously can’t handle that much attention, regardless of what type it is. It’s probably paranoia, but I just feel like I already have the damn virus or I’m going to get it soon, as if there’s no avoiding it. I’ve been taking steps to avoid contracting it like washing my hands and such, but there’s still this underlying paranoia about it all. Does anyone else feel this way?

TL;DR I’m paranoid I’m going to contract/already have the coronavirus even if it probably wouldn’t effect me too badly. Does anyone else feel this way?",1.8187281310747032,3.7952020433212996,3.7303429602888087,87.29354831991115,79.10830324909747,7.1496251041377405,23.289225215218,8.139509932561175,1.3097165787281309,1054,35,223,20,26,356,130,277,0.212,0.705,0.083,-0.9882,0,2,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,17,17,5,2,9,0,24,3,1,4,2,55,54,20,1,11,18,0,5,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,26,7,0,2,14,0,0,5,7,10,0,2,5,5,22,7,21,39,6,21,0,0,0,0,2,9,4,10,9,144,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0979808909630963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22159904231568325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827890892812075,0.1052834985792243,0.07680962430613486,0.22685836064030476,0.0,0.14041115657173098,0.2057537741948085,0.08262483967836008,0.0,0.09386521190784496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766812397226225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483668262829795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24049589950788236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042046386596764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17573035382689614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16775114951529355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663166195581077,0.0,0.0,0.0959413728519392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030713353089492,0.1434588425716369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110089006310138,0.0,0.0,0.15737255718496526,0.0,0.17118759121049892,0.0,0.08030312816948894,0.0,0.11060753400386278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334513304744402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036003087002094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19621143474808309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13404236367554034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138052559126284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380929897854709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803709216241675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960825200837523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319166060946945,0.0,0.0,0.4330147056379608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247668731166653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323316205641862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574540414676336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161531843306963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342918032015235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603672801625883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549213729881171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670468492640406,0.06433553191211704,0.0,0.07971043157885581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939378489012307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905999829366449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426498001467522,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InABlueFunk,2020/03/12,"Need Help, don't know what's happening. I was working on my work for uni, and was pretty overwhelmed but nothing out if the ordinary. All of a sudden I have this bad feeling and uneasyness and tightness in my body and then it happened. I started to slap myself on the cheek with my left hand pretty hard and I slapped myself around 5-6 times and I had to restrain my left arm with my right arm to stop hitting myself and I was thoughtless for a while. Then I had the urge to drop down on the floor from my chair and I did and then I started to spit out fully aware of what I was doing and had this thought running through my mind that this crazy and I was afraid of  what if someone saw me doing this, and that if someone comes and knocks on the door, I would stop and wipe my face before opening the door, yet I was not in control of my actions and I was spitting out and I couldn't control my behaviour. It lasted for a while and then I got up and sat on the chair, picked my phone up and I cried hard for about 5 minutes and I am feeling pretty shit right now, I don't know what happened. Please help me.",2.0024025974026003,3.680604510822516,2.8599545454545456,95.12993181818182,77.48484848484848,5.312640692640693,24.104112554112554,5.6839178017228535,0.2874154112554113,866,29,193,4,20,273,111,231,0.135,0.743,0.122,-0.7362,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,4,4,1,2,10,0,19,9,9,3,1,50,35,30,0,6,5,0,6,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,12,28,0,6,5,0,0,3,4,4,0,0,15,7,35,0,32,17,1,39,0,1,1,0,3,20,1,3,15,142,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591831022077938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872347910916133,0.0,0.0,0.11080275580057423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14463870287312952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216806644437016,0.0,0.0,0.2920927595864915,0.0,0.0,0.1430342647729027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13168049811176127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414424961753732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3454441553847817,0.0,0.233292824282712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17455976511957186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312471836051674,0.10614201216554403,0.0,0.0,0.2829563777739113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131479296064897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965522336751335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494410708087016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293616941512605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974241863117272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22240455575203966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13366308026080173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22066026232532807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18433266562978168,0.0,0.0,0.21772992609085387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337558788430967,0.07592898988698996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18959508353969115,0.0,0.0,0.09250048368613707,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prancyboy,2020/03/12,"Feel scared of moving to new appertment. I been living in a appartment with alot of noise and stuff like “stomping” i can hear the landlord and the landlords dog walk above me.

I finally good a appartment in a appartment building.

Now i feel like i regret paying the rent and sign the contract.

Im scared i wont enjoy living there... but logicily its healthier to live there because less noise annoyance. And i can get proper sleep.


Please need advice. Feel scared and overwhelmed",3.0692045454545465,6.091501147727279,3.486818181818183,84.3127272727273,82.97727272727272,6.836363636363638,25.04545454545455,8.00094639256281,2.017145454545455,383,15,65,8,11,119,58,88,0.158,0.733,0.109,-0.6482,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,10,1,4,8,0,4,1,1,0,0,14,10,6,0,2,1,0,3,2,0,1,0,1,3,0,2,6,0,0,3,0,2,2,1,6,0,0,1,4,8,4,7,8,2,7,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,5,39,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17308573086752602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079745238061296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26868107665854113,0.1265390352268555,0.0,0.1940331594935391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254116000749882,0.0,0.0,0.14856510282714544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19963416767753145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19132675535214985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306988686390212,0.0,0.4692171969060679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882571823804947,0.0,0.1313368771109617,0.0,0.17106964523432713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19443144298815784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5320028572600487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17725417803429908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20276719011900265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hellosydney9,2020/03/12,"For those who rely on school/work to keep consistency and those were shutdown due to Corona. What do you think about starting a video call so we can keep each other company while working at home? I'm doing my masters thesis, and I struggle a lot if I don't have people who are being productive near me. I suffer from anxiety over the anxiety I'm feeling.",6.361857142857144,6.279891900000003,7.249285714285714,74.25821428571432,65.71428571428571,9.857142857142858,33.214285714285715,9.516144504307137,3.0888571428571434,283,11,51,5,4,95,57,70,0.138,0.84,0.022000000000000002,-0.7717,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,1,0,2,2,2,0,1,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,10,15,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,7,0,9,13,2,7,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,2,3,40,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4066244981535661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713794519971309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343805879720674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665875719919139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4724546802501241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259469569859721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18425048160268004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689720086240647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18811238068650746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27783904187700065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17029378553488034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3869654074524089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pr0bablyst0n3d,2020/03/12,no one takes me seriously for as long as i can remember i’ve struggled with deep insecurities but it’s really hard for me to talk about them or receive help because everyone blows me off because for some reason i’m not valid enough to feel this way about myself. i’m easily my biggest enemy and i push myself in a scary hole on my bad days. i don’t know how to fix it but it affects my relationships and it hurts me more and more as it just keeps getting worst as i get older. i’m ready to love myself and have confidence i just have no idea what to do and no one to help me figure it out.,2.9895238095238104,3.831934460317463,4.94777777777778,84.525,73.44444444444444,8.457142857142857,24.317460317460323,8.841846274778883,1.4870698412698409,466,13,104,9,9,161,78,126,0.24,0.61,0.15,-0.902,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,6,7,0,2,1,0,5,1,0,3,0,23,15,13,0,0,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,7,0,1,6,0,0,2,5,6,0,2,0,2,17,1,20,15,5,12,0,1,0,1,7,6,0,2,3,73,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767650567068061,0.2581071340494029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653238458577396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21874813529576045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20229345699016044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704454505422743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22121453051304665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18964633790011648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838031585533382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22663486909138075,0.23898947988332525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18817337038526494,0.0,0.0,0.1163476792889467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18735250111710333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910722708270203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869139385431515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356238163651934,0.21766827602776254,0.0,0.2272922304552717,0.2398208003376073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213203133343042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15917601526632502,0.17016067599493714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804178848852724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sundripped,2020/03/12,"Help me out, what's with my mind? It's gonna be hard to put into words but I feel that my mind is abnormal. Maybe it isn't but I really don't know. I'll just describe stuff that happens to me and has happened since I was 15, possibly even much younger

I'll get intrusive images, usually sexual or homosexual (I'm 19M, Straight). That or they're of monsters or scary stuff. Particularly close ups or of them being within my vacinity. Sometimes they are also accompanied by a monster scream sound in my head. The kicked is that on a level I feel that they are on purpose or I am concious of everything so it feels like I basically did it to myself. In the past it felt like self torture or like ""my mind is joking with me"" is what I would tell myself 15 year old self. If it matters I feel like I remember crying saying ""I'm stuck in my head"" when I was around 7 years old.

When I close my eyes to sleep at night I'll have visual kind of stuff. But they arent geometric shapes, it's like inchorrent jumbles of stuff I've seen, usually games or shows or characters whatever. But it only happens as I'm kinda half sleeping but I can stay ""half sleeping"" for several hours

Speaking of that ""half sleep"" state. That's when random stories in my mind start to arise and they range from fantasies to what's basically a dream of really random things. However the story is in my control I basically make these things but in a half concious way. Is this really just dreaming? It's also how I wake up after sleeping so thats why I rarely have dreams that are out of my control. Although it does happen

I also have intrusive fantasies that I'm inclined to act out physically. Normal fantasies like beating up dudes for girls, conversations where I come on top etc. I feel that they are intrusive cause they come out of nowhere and I get lost in them and when I stop I feel like they still linger and will catch me again.

At times I've had fears that my mind was trying to convince me of something. But I really don't want to believe whatever it is. This is very rare but it's happened with me being gay (HOCD probably) that I'm attracted to my family members, that my parents were gonna divorce, or that my dad raped me (I can assure he did not). Very weird, I don't like them I used to be horrified at these thoughts when I was 15. Now I approach them with more maturity and grace and they are more now implied in my feelings than me being convinced of something.  I've also had ideas like aliens were trying to communicate with me (I used to be very scared of aliens and I hated the idea of believing in them for other reasons too). I have also feared having autism like 3 times at different points in my life. I dont have autism but I didn't really understand that till more recently. I've also feared scizophrenia twice. 

I have rarely heard voices but NOT external voices. They are INSIDE the mind, and they do not feel like separate entities from myself except maybe this one time. The voices are either my own or I've heard characters from shows etc. Sometimes it's a little boy or a little girl. They aren't hostile except for my own. Once again like the ""dreams"" I can tell that I control them in a way and they are a part of my inner feelings or something

Everything I've described has been happening to me since I was 7 or 15 I can't really tell. It's probably 7 tbh. 

I do smoke weed I started when I was 18 and I have done acid and shrooms since 18 as well. I find that they do agitate some of these things

Interesting story: when I smoked a lot with my friends, I found myself basically tripping in way. It was like constant images some ""trying to scare me"" and receiving a message (the message is always a life lesson/ emotional lesson). That's when I realized I swear I have experienced that before when I was a younger teen (before any drugs) and I would jokingly call it my third eye (of course on the inside I was terrified). 

Sometimes if I'm alone in a room, the ambient noises of the house and appliances sound like whispering

From weed I have had audible hallucinations: the ice cream truck which I had heard and noted like two days earlier

My body also grumbles and has internal adjustments sometimes in any area but usually stomach midrift area, from my experience it's a positive thing. Once my stomach grumbled very intensely and I intuitively understood my world perception changed. And I was right cause I was less naturally upset with my dad.

If you really read all of that THANK YOU SO MUCH. So yeah I have no idea what's with me, if there's anything to be diagnosed or what. Any help is appreciated",3.2574826818750893,5.259877304395609,4.501745722631799,83.30388718876063,74.85714285714286,8.03616636528029,26.573932396717204,8.805574503141022,2.0856999582695788,3657,137,717,78,79,1203,357,910,0.091,0.78,0.129,0.9862,5,1,6,0,1,0,89.0,0,2,19,8,34,40,4,6,26,1,79,19,13,10,2,130,126,73,0,8,37,3,11,15,1,5,4,14,1,5,59,37,0,4,26,13,0,8,13,13,1,8,32,31,119,27,91,82,16,96,0,1,4,2,48,48,0,24,50,484,178,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046903672084296,0.0,0.2535119715735605,0.037682410202000735,0.0,0.0,0.0923901347925646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037267340651923095,0.04031502962138391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707179950644874,0.10204587724058944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050303645555415305,0.0,0.0,0.046243088348204134,0.0,0.0,0.0930444436480332,0.0479076390426514,0.07802147758478148,0.0,0.04893915633751268,0.15237965726673786,0.0,0.0,0.04974564078970466,0.02920636721031066,0.0,0.0,0.0459653496864626,0.0,0.04731527406410856,0.0,0.0,0.039630957133736745,0.04634432226415302,0.0530760243763634,0.0,0.05251854001002813,0.0,0.0,0.05094177728702462,0.0,0.0,0.10101394769518753,0.029911635067332805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140206736032214,0.04429937393787467,0.042692551275054016,0.15288138985562602,0.20608620219881146,0.12941216168067274,0.04348262002992183,0.0,0.0413914957291089,0.0,0.0,0.04965485580562223,0.034988622315758534,0.0,0.047321174606465545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402828566142255,0.0,0.04056825493530994,0.04471153472911873,0.09295505049504788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607098403012766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04459857065921382,0.05225511534357845,0.0,0.15337052516991273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0471594394662774,0.024888549743637158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639750919664796,0.3318740953246226,0.090778938635073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049436108002383565,0.038501386221461785,0.0,0.0,0.030229422824487786,0.0,0.09099375295505606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2743617486500341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658230863795726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042498779797881504,0.044371642700155665,0.0,0.0,0.09504217261650184,0.09645834972514172,0.03068764188170825,0.0344428026894977,0.0,0.0,0.05028585192442586,0.049041405648561985,0.043231563921900105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042810851161629984,0.05105428574882638,0.0,0.0,0.09765408686492462,0.0,0.0,0.04552594134305808,0.0,0.0,0.04529925330509868,0.0,0.20308407391185448,0.046562576483151055,0.04471544706112659,0.0,0.05130134056166312,0.038674848848283705,0.0,0.036014038496823574,0.09068037075791048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944884312831154,0.051161417308827284,0.0,0.11238561818626172,0.0,0.22659851864313424,0.0,0.0,0.10459243074946044,0.1791599960312589,0.0,0.0641087405509916,0.048269914241477516,0.03616625510262163,0.03786195814576758,0.0,0.0,0.20737111156389654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874849707243836,0.04169418325858586,0.0,0.0,0.12034667666084795,0.0,0.0,0.035952817805455235,0.07922163816705725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922406967766977,0.0,0.04423881658809165,0.04714536205005381,0.0,0.07822685168168775,0.14963169059526038,0.14946606475336002,0.026711444766222562,0.10784013322912392,0.0,0.0,0.040718449952065416,0.0,0.04086447175331306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06434116806389523,0.0,0.0,0.05832668383925094
mentalhealth,FewLooseMarbles,2020/03/12,"My grandpa laughed at me having an eating disorder So I dont talk to my family. 

Recently I've been thinking about my grandpa and I took that as an instinct to check in on him as hes nearing 90.  The rest of my family and I dont talk, so I knew he hadn't heard much (and i didnt know what he had heard, tbh). 

He asked how I'd been doing and I updated him about being in recovery and going back to work soon. He asked what I was talking about and I explained, and he laughed. 

He freaking laughed, and talked about how he had never heard of such a thing and why do I need help to eat, etc. When I told him eating disorders have one of the highest mortality rates, he just laughed and said, ""you have to die from something.""

Y'all I dont know anymore. I'm done.",0.7152251552795015,2.6235211863354047,2.69959239130435,93.63025815217394,82.47826086956522,6.0125776397515525,23.10597826086957,7.1686216300943375,0.7187543478260867,585,21,135,8,16,196,89,161,0.06,0.846,0.094,0.6486,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,0,1,13,5,0,0,5,0,18,3,0,2,1,20,34,17,2,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,4,10,3,0,5,0,1,2,6,1,0,1,15,4,22,4,20,18,3,13,0,0,0,0,29,5,0,0,6,92,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277020725000861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407591657939677,0.0,0.0,0.09901372677027316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363961666755014,0.0,0.29515583476443497,0.0,0.0,0.13177315109084162,0.4527412186276071,0.0,0.0,0.3952817726366966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360902848088705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24277977257087466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318114421095387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630967686961806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153373986599455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465841971016402,0.09547895626271416,0.0993129002696441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872557213643371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714168799568376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248672136268905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913097949409924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41399152950663454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554694530065972,0.08250857095640313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304220287511212,0.14306466122727216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161920154944608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937437695632202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ludexer,2020/03/12,"I need help with feeling guilty and repeating the same behavior or mistakes. I'm a 15 year old from a Middle Eastern country and a student, I find no issues in studying nor school but I suffer from guilt everytime I make a mistake for example: If I forget to study and do my Math homework because my attention was headed for social media or videogames, I feel as If I let down one of my family members and blame myself for other stuff irrelevant to what I just did.

Other times my behavior around my family or my friends can make me feel ashamed or depressed for the rest of the day, for example: I use up most of the my family's internet data (we're running on a limited data since It's cheap and affordable, sadly though, the speed is high which means it can depleted in less than two weeks) I always try changing that behavior to become better in life but I end up doing it again.

Another example is not following my religion (AKA: Muslim) I do pray everyday hoping I'd get by but I know deep down, It's not cutting it at all, and hiding that away from my family even while they're aware of it makes it humiliating to my mental health (if you're wondering, I did try changing that too and reading more into my religion but like the last example, It went back to square one) I tried reading into ways and routes to accepting that guilt and by chance, making it right for once but It isn't cutting it for me, and as a last resort I came here hoping I'd find a solution to all of this.",7.1038383838383865,5.9669257138047165,8.024255892255889,72.79860606060606,64.58922558922559,11.691043771043773,34.95151515151515,10.93419730881044,3.747681212121213,1175,45,225,28,15,400,167,297,0.125,0.747,0.128,0.2698,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,8,16,2,3,13,0,12,3,1,5,2,56,31,27,0,8,15,0,3,1,1,0,2,0,1,0,21,15,0,1,10,2,1,4,5,10,0,3,5,4,30,6,41,25,7,36,1,3,1,0,3,17,0,11,15,161,51,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162360330628053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546404716803835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802473518836928,0.0,0.0,0.10345565349907453,0.08467080831488608,0.0,0.06712442419526446,0.12161217452245952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973868148031058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259409909297159,0.0,0.0,0.23297185564586365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07101436954138833,0.0,0.09484095879749456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752825045415346,0.0,0.0,0.07272920630501542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4152224192868536,0.0,0.16703072101758554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20128425780663675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507374220776684,0.0,0.0575299789329801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300865080309196,0.11704594885367657,0.0,0.0,0.07380704013800678,0.11634140320010106,0.0,0.21873593850233344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149303250191278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06051573124849016,0.17951508463281612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259894465904953,0.0777767188510187,0.05379609972690382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29400758923871945,0.0,0.0,0.11994634096059953,0.0,0.0,0.11096893328767238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164807716593091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554603692413293,0.11726773212512838,0.14923208526749435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220287438762434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403668687353134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144116674392557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910873733290944,0.0,0.0,0.11224727547662623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260540950091887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818636829412234,0.0,0.06420831284217901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22428037285455615,0.0,0.1075653006290824,0.0,0.0,0.09510307313094384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740330510101921,0.08832674544914854,0.0,0.0,0.10207670794223804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941385016866406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090975489108478
mentalhealth,pachacuti092,2020/03/12,"Coronavirus and college closings Hey guys how many of you are college students in the US and how are you guys dealing with the whole outbreak and leaving school and taking classes online?

For me I was happy about school getting cancelled at first but then the reality hit me. Everything would be online and I’d be cooped up in a house at home and I’d be separated from friends for months at a time

My mental health hasn’t been too great recently and I’ve struggled with loneliness in the past and I’m afraid of it returning when I go home.",3.832096436058702,5.872115962264153,4.36559748427673,84.74093291404613,73.33962264150944,7.352620545073376,29.70230607966457,8.167268648758528,2.1364142557651995,436,19,83,7,9,138,71,106,0.07400000000000001,0.8170000000000001,0.109,0.705,0,0,0,0,1,0,3.0,1,2,0,1,5,5,0,2,6,0,9,1,0,2,0,15,14,13,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,2,1,11,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,2,0,8,3,15,7,1,17,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,8,55,9,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836182660998352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600691429765931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514958831280216,0.0,0.0,0.13760335504071175,0.0,0.09305242617947047,0.0,0.10122108313480564,0.0,0.0,0.19636121124766645,0.0,0.3527035799080904,0.0,0.1895959105330294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18931711287432998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.357307346019202,0.0,0.0,0.2055090687602537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18858730577681526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805703497732492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794877847077777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216158144960225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002121963033562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17585703953210818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3605032066454828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861938460443313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13391267179204056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385436257182573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21423818910244355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19884768970601588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652056592755184,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hidden_pixels,2020/03/12,"How can I not hate myself when everyone else does? I've been getting lonelier and lonelier in the past year, lots of friends have left and my relationship with my parents has deteriorated significantly. They have always contributed greatly to my self-hatred. I'm 19 and I haven't graduated yet but I don't think they will let me leave after I do. They criticise every little thing I do from my academic achievement to the way I talk or sit. I never learned how to make them proud no matter how much I tried. I cry myself to sleep every night and then I cry again thinking of how miserable I am. It's an endless cycle and I know I'll live through all that whether I like it or not but this feeling of loneliness is something else. It's like being breathless all the time. I have no friends though I try to text a couple people every now and then but we're not close enough for me to share anything about this. I'm always extra kind to friends and strangers, I always ask how they're doing but nobody reciprocates. I feel like no one is even aware I exist, I'm always on the sidelines. I'm certain there is something terribly wrong with me, the look of hatred in my parents' eyes when they look at me nearly makes me throw up though I don't blame them. I'm barely functioning, I find it very hard to focus on studying as I'm always caught up in fantasies of being loved. It's my favourite part of the day, imagining, knowing that's all it is, that I have someone to go to when I'm feeling bad, someone to lay with until I feel better. This will never happen and it makes my stomach turn. I don't know what to do but I'm constantly getting the urge to hurt myself somehow. I feel like I deserve it, I feel like that's exactly what my family wants to do some times. So I figure I'll do it myself if I'm worth all that hatred. I don't know. If you've read this far, thank you, stranger.",2.7894691558441553,4.4652358129870136,4.1510186688311705,86.73081371753248,75.28571428571428,6.786525974025975,25.27800324675325,7.531066641456977,1.210650974025974,1488,51,306,19,32,491,186,385,0.155,0.69,0.155,-0.6263,2,0,2,0,0,2,34.0,0,1,6,3,18,22,1,1,9,0,28,4,3,8,8,62,65,33,0,3,13,2,7,5,3,2,0,0,0,0,21,12,0,0,16,2,1,3,13,6,0,1,2,10,52,16,39,58,10,37,0,2,3,1,17,13,0,7,24,205,73,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3658987837577791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237368600006107,0.0,0.08221948023612069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343288170861036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778283281739894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09504051193135696,0.0,0.0,0.09731275646874016,0.19321343156800386,0.05671916516459104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076963861582405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14693848809184307,0.0,0.0,0.09087376341465672,0.0,0.058088805003043587,0.0,0.2222998747223203,0.08403805466045111,0.0,0.0,0.08290951933976605,0.0,0.2668148183005596,0.1884901429151781,0.0,0.0,0.08038285164886894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20384515133827508,0.0,0.09189836924802608,0.0,0.049982858349478264,0.0,0.0,0.0969629478678166,0.0,0.0,0.07777209978669028,0.0,0.07878410675131015,0.08683041286175276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415012131406718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09158427739048032,0.19333561801114946,0.0,0.0,0.09312420198664176,0.09555572718983042,0.08993275840818538,0.0,0.2148346796096484,0.08814697111818948,0.07765966915929345,0.0,0.14770828977503092,0.0,0.0,0.07477021939893537,0.07937647701892146,0.0,0.17611785954061587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06465187767931074,0.0,0.13566179321122096,0.0,0.0,0.08253321247699212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059595820865593965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19531162641389935,0.0952390814939325,0.08395628928284453,0.060972049004613074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879717703863386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442320661822028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174891388406137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801148538894152,0.0,0.14903605986392118,0.13541328875141986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068924721088428,0.0,0.08097067497705078,0.0,0.0,0.058428723618582326,0.1127070165190034,0.1728168687959779,0.0,0.10256633761742424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942179771282885,0.09566213691770947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256628625019873,0.051873991605000884,0.0698090052755671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615729934676348,0.0,0.05663560946075921
mentalhealth,username--04,2020/03/12,"Recently I've had the thought that I might be depressed My family has often commented on how I seem depressed and recently have just been feeling generally shitty not having the willpower to push through studying for some exams coming up and find myself with not too many reasons to get out of bed whenever I wake up. I would be slightly worried about going to a doctor about this in case I am depressed cause I feel like there's already a stigma around it and I'm not really sure in what ways it could help me having a label. If my thought process here is dumb I'd appreciate some advice on what I should be doing about this, thanks.",13.479758064516124,7.475443911290327,12.201612903225806,62.797419354838716,57.46774193548386,14.980645161290324,47.1290322580645,11.20814326018867,5.19602258064516,511,20,93,8,4,165,89,124,0.159,0.7440000000000001,0.09699999999999999,-0.8446,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,11,7,1,0,5,0,16,2,1,3,1,30,26,5,0,4,5,0,2,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,7,7,0,0,7,0,0,3,3,4,0,0,4,2,11,3,18,15,2,14,0,3,0,0,2,8,1,6,3,72,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715758752602488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19375817368699375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15630445577093866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18037021507236548,0.0,0.15124762038950887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018726730017755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4536833816837067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17971475497504713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16552228921049086,0.0,0.17755821797094667,0.12543521418442108,0.0,0.0,0.1604779972690843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173390808302792,0.0,0.09978681822270813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176883489525996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578008473325135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780117354132346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18626386151996413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248178567167272,0.18052667317479204,0.34673042203279864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598424916549288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16548316326838386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616515399901952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.278783653306937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393681503973812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17831118861451728,0.0,0.12472781680109825,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SmolGuardian,2020/03/12,Does Trazodone give anyone else crazy nightmares? I've been having insane horrible dreams for months. It started around the time I started Trazodone. Last night I was so tired of how those nightmares make me feel so I took one of my old Seroquels instead. Slept great. No dreams. Felt great in the morning.,3.5651168831168825,6.732512109090912,2.277922077922078,92.72545454545455,82.45454545454545,3.8701298701298703,26.038961038961038,5.288315135182226,0.6516233766233772,246,10,42,1,7,69,44,55,0.207,0.599,0.19399999999999998,0.0152,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,3,2,1,2,0,5,11,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,2,5,2,5,6,0,10,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,7,23,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697163922298216,0.2300209470546935,0.0,0.19984752880730766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19645648091610526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18753618703726752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351106692993118,0.0,0.21554974015045045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21535539543919044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4950115320543608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18299282307961626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14985169316459318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791892140649919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21067269947949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23556901121326085,0.0,0.15212315239699198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177964519532134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309044357603988,0.25802318147606695,0.0,0.0,0.2494214353191451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AltoNat,2020/03/12,"Unable to suspend disbelief I'm not entirely sure if this is the right place to post, but I figured I'd give it a shot anyway. I've been having issues with anhedonia for several years now and I have tried a whole slew of things to fix or even determine what the source of the problem is. 

Recently, I had a thought, specifically about suspension of disbelief. When other people play a game or watch a movie, they can more easily put themselves in that mindset and enjoy it because they aren't being bombarded by negativity or pessimism. When I watch a movie, I'm more inclined to find the things it did poorly or compare it to things I've seen that I think are better. Is it possible that this is the source of my anhedonia?",7.94908814589666,6.833542936170215,8.417487335359679,70.59000000000002,62.90070921985816,12.028774062816614,36.45491388044579,11.20814326018867,4.025155217831813,578,23,108,14,7,193,89,141,0.1,0.797,0.10300000000000001,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,1,6,5,0,0,11,0,13,0,0,0,1,16,19,10,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,15,3,0,0,4,2,1,1,3,1,0,0,5,3,8,4,14,13,3,10,0,0,3,0,4,3,0,5,5,79,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262750047778307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19242131283324893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14370168473858913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19885331098529768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20871115615812585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270845808977756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083433311233788,0.0,0.2273123679656727,0.0,0.0,0.2452753538453052,0.20837010802463424,0.0,0.0,0.20818329807999805,0.0,0.2187160432915442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148222610385056,0.0,0.0,0.1858019771904172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457900360292161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050553688868733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4336277542983926,0.13940885988954474,0.0,0.1727247767670814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477144651619648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429070250391097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010672960618573
mentalhealth,eam115,2020/03/12,"Anyone else’s anxiety going crazy with all that’s going on in the world? I feel like my brain is literally shutting down with how many unknowns there are right now. I don’t like to not have answers and I especially don’t like when plans change. This have already been off for me the past couple weeks and now events that I was supposed to go to are being canceled and those were the few things that still kept me going. My school announced they’re moving to all online classes for the rest of the semester but none of my professors have actually given us a plan as to what that means for our class. I’m not so much worried about the virus itself but it’s more so all the panic and unknowns surrounding it. I know I’m really going to struggle with these online classes because now I’ll almost never leave my apartment and while I do like to stay home, never leaving home is going to be even harder. Everything just seems so uncertain and chaotic right now I’m basically just shutting down. I don’t like uncertainties and I don’t like not having answers so this is an expressly stressful time for me.",6.86791666666667,6.646514402777775,6.999444444444446,76.94,64.69444444444444,9.607407407407408,32.35185185185185,9.075114841892004,2.662701851851852,885,31,165,13,12,285,124,216,0.127,0.795,0.078,-0.9159999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,0,2,16,10,0,4,9,0,19,1,1,1,5,32,34,17,0,0,7,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,13,10,0,1,6,0,0,7,10,4,0,0,5,1,17,6,24,27,8,33,0,0,0,0,2,12,0,3,19,120,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.12313041235985052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634789726482665,0.0,0.1392393005956383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652495115176808,0.0,0.0,0.08822579300239519,0.12928310210377858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691624161950786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085510292903275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347838550745095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396122936616609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540457435438444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333862483018893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339962420764738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379881068971407,0.09014077270008493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43025529752688746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531313531873807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06934350144963254,0.0,0.0,0.2672061486397883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36986183682513496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792352996057582,0.0,0.13744358857907665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410603183196326,0.0927545088627841,0.0,0.194630743180691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14804135675956215,0.0,0.0,0.12045008834854135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083212629766608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21550869494602876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769771674615515,0.0,0.11486667282202205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448774246210385,0.10076500193738992,0.0,0.1445351647460465,0.1319074481100412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382629797085167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357474069622494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177522465211535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121146476681088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813872425929526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DJRyanReid,2020/03/12,"Efficacy of SSRIs The title of this post is a little misleading. I'm not questioning the efficacy of SSRIs in most people, I'm sure they're very effective for lots of people. I'm talking about in my particular case. I was taking SSRIs for 16 years, various different ones. I moved to China to teach English about three and a half years ago, and I just stopped taking them, cold turkey. I didn't even notice I'd stopped taking them. No ill ffects whatsoever. Now I'm back in the UK, and I'm fairly sure I have BPD, which I'm trying to get diagnosed right now, although it's very hard.

I read this article today. https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/health-51834456

It describes the hell of coming off of antidepressants. If I didn't even notice I had stopped taking them (I was taking two different ones at that point - mirtazipene and citalopram), then were they actually doing anything for me? Did I have to take them?",4.266842105263159,6.567398491228072,5.141380116959066,78.50610526315792,72.85964912280701,8.068771929824562,26.604678362573104,8.841846274778883,2.252775906432749,726,26,128,15,15,236,101,171,0.12,0.82,0.06,-0.8378,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,5,1,8,3,1,0,6,0,11,2,0,1,2,17,25,7,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,5,0,3,2,1,0,2,4,1,0,5,7,2,17,2,20,18,3,22,1,0,0,0,7,8,1,4,11,83,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.11763691272347915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10685803256221116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920027220099027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269354077365773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518252813114714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384094596691312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235311457554986,0.0,0.2518928361571631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15924089504374025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298106223457793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798682873268672,0.0,0.0,0.12813629216944986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082020430201447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10248512307216044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281228516981142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744881199212081,0.0,0.0,0.16337213091242547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671448337702361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395629562236087,0.0,0.11545112558201373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504072190660188,0.0,0.12058006232155205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294685550319572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30234917397537703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272290720492956,0.0,0.5438200375259324,0.09689146639563023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426487832535767,0.0,0.0,0.08184379913877968,0.0,0.11775733311311325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19892852627759253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552571987219651
mentalhealth,roach098,2020/03/12,"I think I'm going to kill myself I'm 14, I'm a transgender male, and I'm considering suicide. All my life I've been bullied and I've tried to kill myself multiple times before. I know how i would do it. If your curious here it is.

I'm going to drink water 24 hours before I try, so when I slit my wrists its harder to stop the bleeding. I'm going to climb into the bath and slit my wrists along the vein.  I'm going to turn on some music and let myself fall asleep in the tub.

I'm not scared to die, I'm scared about how calm I am. I've already drinking the water. I've been self harming since age 9, and I have found that I don't really care about pain. It would be easy. I already have a suicide note written. It would be easy. But the only thing thats stopping me is the pain it would cause my family. Please let me know a way to make it less painful for them.",0.8007282913165241,2.350712185185188,2.918369125427952,93.94106442577034,80.58730158730158,5.7169000933706835,19.054154995331462,6.522977012572876,-0.10612941176470556,669,15,158,6,17,227,101,189,0.207,0.6920000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.9772,0,0,2,0,0,4,20.0,0,1,1,1,7,10,2,2,10,0,17,13,4,4,1,26,38,11,5,5,3,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,2,10,7,4,2,4,3,0,6,2,8,0,0,4,0,20,2,15,26,3,16,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,6,88,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584777148911631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993117728934457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940612529469988,0.12030894010605085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215464498417928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294554157944565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040520837019488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841009820406346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662356716071466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533427587684332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591398739885532,0.0,0.1287262268668315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23951519705891755,0.08272149529733888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817489529604307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907091973230145,0.3738545288041678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855664613613807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502660242416181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23450426197563806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12217605452032093,0.0,0.0,0.09687839543504917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19582607520715686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562086963546571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780572674023553,0.07504229757122287,0.0,0.0,0.06829045667249573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15902623203490562,0.12738703883031854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296010681210598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327793657076115,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_heart_naptime,2020/03/12,You are a-ok to me! You got this. Take this day by the horns!,-5.113999999999997,-4.470697066666666,-1.84,117.16000000000004,119.66666666666669,2.0,5.0,3.1291,-3.3089999999999997,44,0,15,0,3,15,13,15,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,9,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5065539641654317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.628200696861034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5905649548115753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ftypeguy,2020/03/12,My parents get mad at me because i find it hard to talk about my depression and anxiety I recently asked my parents if i could see a psychologist or a therapist due to my experience of depression and anxiety in the last year but then they started saying that if i cannot speak to them aboutit i cant speak to anyone else and they refuse to believe in my mental health because they are christians and claim ‘it’s just because you need to find peace in your spirit with god’. what do i do?,9.515816326530613,6.3309604795918375,9.377244897959184,71.46954081632656,61.55102040816327,13.06530612244898,41.8469387755102,11.20814326018867,4.448236734693878,389,17,78,8,4,128,66,98,0.13699999999999998,0.7929999999999999,0.069,-0.4019,2,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,2,4,0,2,3,1,0,3,0,6,1,0,0,0,15,11,9,0,4,5,2,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,5,18,0,13,10,0,10,2,2,1,0,14,4,0,3,6,54,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26843078639609763,0.0,0.0,0.12267563315735733,0.17976473622286102,0.0,0.0,0.16401793964800526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32085000269143193,0.0,0.0,0.1976670958379173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007902441287673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30222205255635193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656227455223686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17161944863470954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207081745740992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916630775199852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15716478417582472,0.0,0.0,0.18649045388445826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301156913227595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768078856087819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300906790759844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896231216946473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323135042150128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395213719860212,0.0,0.0,0.13980741715429726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418128889875996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14101651639612445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20370584800115904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298120527867117
mentalhealth,RushBoiiiz,2020/03/12,"A ""Mild"" Depression might not really be what you think. Tl;dr: Medications for the mental illness IS NOT a ""drug"". It's a cough drop/advil/aleve for your mental ""common cold"".

As a patient undergoing depression, bipolar disorder, and memory loss triggered (not entirely caused) by a car vs bike accident, I would like to do a little PSA myself.  
I used to think that mental health wasn't a serious issue, at least for me. ""I'm not crazy, I'm not trying to kill myself or the others,"" I would tell to my therapists. Growing up in Asian Community reinforced my idea, and also confined my thought.
Then I had several years of what only seems like a ""mild depression"". I would skip classes, refuse to eat because I don't want to drag myself out of bed, only functioned when bouts of mania took over, and then would get easily distracted to something else - failing the classes over, and over again.
My previous assessment? I was just being lazy, weak-willed and doesn't know how to properly concetrate. I was merely being ""young"". Then I started to drink, smoked cigarettes to calm my nerves and begin to numb myself of anxiety. This ""numbness"" caused me to be careless and overconfident, which partially lead to the car accident.
I had a TBI (traumatic brain injury), and due to internal bleeding building up pressure in my skull, multiple areas of brain were squashed and damaged. I couldn't walk without loosing balance for few weeks, then I couldn't concentrate on writing more than 5 words for a month, then I slowly regained my focus (not as fast as I hoped, which became a recurring thought, even until now), and the depression and bipolar disorder, triggered by the TBI, started to haunt me. I'm still recovering from the brain injury that happened about an year ago.
So I started to take medications to deal with my issues. I would think to myself, ""I have the perfect excuse to be mentally ill"". Previously, I would think I am NOT CRAZY, so I don't need to take any medications. ""It would only make me ""dependent"" on the medication,"" I would say.
But I know now, the medications for mental illness is NOT a drug. It's sole purpose is to give enough kick to start the day, and allow you to find other means other than the medication to sustain yourself. Quite literally, it's a pill to help you fight common cold, or a painkiller to relieve muscle strain, for your body.
Now, I wish I didn't disregarded my depression and mania as ""nothing significant"" in the past. I had this perception, reinforced via the media and the social pressure, that ""if you take medications for mental illness, you are a fucking psycho."" That can't be further from the truth. Think of it as having two health bars, one for the physical health and the other for the mental health. If physical health bar is damaged from a monster attack, don't you intuitively seek to recover health? It's the same for the mental health. Insanity/ Craziness is not a debuff. It's merely a indicator of how much your mental ""health"" is damaged. And lack of indicator doesn't mean that everything is a-okay.
In our current society, mental illness, or ""depression"" to be specific, is seen as mostly Western, Middle-class disease. It's not. It's same as getting hit by a club and saying that ""he/she's only whining because they are so sensitive to the pain"". Pain is painful no matter what race, sex or who you are. Be aware of your feelings. While you hide and shove them deep inside of your heart, it GROWS. Please for your own sake, don't hesitate to seek treatment and medication, because they are NOT ""drugs"", but only a cough drop for your mental ""common cold"". The whole purpose of them is to ""HELP"" you fight your illness.",6.563741450068399,7.404070794117651,6.941265389876888,73.4635430916553,65.32352941176471,10.031463748290015,33.60807113543093,10.043921644272036,3.465298905608755,2900,121,500,63,43,943,311,680,0.124,0.8220000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.9879,1,0,7,0,2,1,140.0,1,17,4,5,15,35,5,4,44,0,52,48,6,11,2,97,90,48,1,17,22,0,1,2,0,9,36,2,1,0,28,21,4,3,16,5,0,7,24,28,0,2,12,7,65,7,87,58,11,58,0,12,1,2,36,17,1,11,35,348,93,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040979252791239824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036969344900607534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031437331028214006,0.0,0.035365087453385215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052592204443412637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454237725070664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051350039508075485,0.0,0.1548206854466636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497991258049213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029813905007832205,0.04766010815701145,0.23890201558085544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059649650418328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04528685755619472,0.16083302162169438,0.047303846856074805,0.03861842917867531,0.0,0.0,0.047766953943817414,0.0,0.030533843531611107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0415476783922828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023374790585660683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04225250312418498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04273800060690102,0.04830552853139993,0.04434710558214178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04088018553466926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3931144441003655,0.0,0.05478163248685044,0.061972699266204676,0.0,0.0,0.045915865580605016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05218695676289462,0.0,0.09650220975749207,0.0,0.0,0.0511455810263485,0.0,0.05081254046395399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045170345590831884,0.046333640772386685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0308582417676617,0.0,0.0,0.10071394954375186,0.0,0.37256713708259104,0.5124679671096743,0.04904170368975064,0.0,0.0,0.03689957699511201,0.0,0.03398366203232279,0.03427824583133837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04435800866198045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031325992492918835,0.17579633238769876,0.14757286712168055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044130847593141856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05074560128652295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049170272243514536,0.0,0.0,0.029615505436157645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352637285979595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042085179856170135,0.0,0.05222565424613842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047124682371469835,0.0,0.03558937191615569,0.0,0.0,0.13088460383969086,0.0,0.03691856937749975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427544966141182,0.0,0.04040621674544393,0.0,0.0,0.053675476096073566,0.0,0.1481085041741539,0.0,0.07340138450613824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05136216208555957,0.0313864821753191,0.0,0.045159052679124574,0.0,0.0,0.03992704584424092,0.0,0.0,0.027267084302116645,0.0,0.037082145704850925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05161306987294917,0.05316111210388185,0.044563142841386086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26271825714397506,0.0,0.0,0.0595399694485589
mentalhealth,henkdepotvjis,2020/03/12,"Why do I still need to live Backstory time:
As a kid i got bullied a lot between the age of 8 to 12 i got called fat and smelly. Between the age of 13 to 16 i got beaten up almost daily by people at school. When i was 17 i got my first girlfriend. This girlfriend got abused in multiple ways by her dad wich i witnessed myself after a year of relationship. Last year my grandma died. A month after that my ex girlfriend (the first one) admitted rhat she had another relationship going for 2 monthts. After all this shit i tried to kill myself. I got therapy after that. This therapy didn't work so i got a second type of therapy after that. This one didn't work either. Now i am suicidal again. Why do i need to live? Why do i need to live this way.",0.8995416348357494,3.1543227662337685,3.1909931245225387,88.31951489686787,84.32467532467533,6.220932009167304,21.3964858670741,7.510576382923642,0.9270378915202442,582,19,121,10,17,199,87,154,0.179,0.812,0.009000000000000001,-0.9815,0,0,0,0,1,1,16.0,0,0,0,5,5,3,3,0,8,0,8,2,2,0,1,9,20,4,3,3,1,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,8,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,5,11,0,20,0,24,9,3,24,0,0,0,0,12,3,1,2,18,82,28,5,0.0,0.12323412070668975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415038105674093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10906291530951724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620521725558617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079453269920285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769406698652436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059110933856938774,0.0,0.5823006804844694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507098097384807,0.0,0.0,0.08478153569135051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755265936331547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842506489838241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301930366496653,0.0,0.0,0.2313649367973424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409589103810374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210701578196826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233343232171492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526305658503653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676414530443276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830620340832848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376939245121136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568314096781064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060648712369160675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061554919811258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165115626825924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815568935134017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514401509268064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13395727556734652
mentalhealth,turtletimeee,2020/03/12,"mental health during the coronavirus Not sure if any one else here has severe health anxiety, but I do and this coronavirus outbreak has sent me spiraling. I did find some kind folks on twitter who were posting about this and was given a site that I have found VERY helpful. If this is not allowed I am sorry and please delete, but well get through this <3
[reddit!](https://www.mentalhealth.org.uk/publications/looking-after-your-mental-health-during-coronavirus-outbreak)",10.040769230769232,11.8525958974359,7.2863076923076955,70.60869230769235,57.97435897435898,9.82974358974359,34.83076923076923,9.888512548439397,3.6163969230769233,392,15,56,7,5,111,59,78,0.06,0.721,0.22,0.9375,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,9,2,0,1,1,14,13,7,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,6,0,5,3,3,7,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,0,38,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13012988758422067,0.0,0.14638821758071485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15985491399349575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17489759155341664,0.0,0.0,0.20981398561125356,0.0,0.0,0.09997656912805286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6102132808197418,0.0,0.0,0.12826312102583226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199269734914666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3856873732850008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296690192277833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21005343567119192,0.0,0.0,0.18326790670298795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161798821268596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21420942603751195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180352491873083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578902518733192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17205367196712054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mnic22,2020/03/12,"Anyone know what type of anxiety or mechanism this is considered? I’m curious. I’m someone who has struggled with my own mental health from a very young age (22F) and in some ways has improved greatly (recovering from an eating disorder -that I’m still technically in recovery from), but in other ways has a long long way to go (severe depression, mood swings, and multiple forms of anxiety).

I’m in a relationship currently that puts heavy toll on my mental health. I love him greatly but there has been a lot that he has impacted. Over the last 4 years beings together he has repeatedly made fun of me and got furiously angry with me about my anxiety saying I’m not confident and I’m not attractive being “so insecure” etc. There have been times I’ve let it cripple me and he holds it over me and calls me weak etc using it against me. It often leads back to that when arguing. Not always but usually. To the point that now anytime we have issues and will argue or fight I feel like I need to fight hard and prove I’m not all those things. But my heart rate increases, internally I’m freaking out and panicking but on the outside I almost completely stop responding. I become really cold. It feels like a defense mechanism to protect myself almost. It usually makes things worse, makes him more angry, and I’m not used to such a contrast in emotions. Inside my head and body I feel pure fear and panic, outside i’m stoic and emotionless. And then as soon as we finish fighting I practically ball my eyes out. Not necessarily once things are resolved, but typically once he leaves or I go to another room to be alone etc. I lose it. Full on sobbing. 

I don’t know I guess I’m just curious. I work on myself everyday to fight my restrictive thoughts and improve in those ways that I feel like I need to work on my anxiety and other things. 
He used to say that I didn’t have an eating disorder and all this other shit but I took matters into my own hands and chose recovery anyways. I knew how sick I was. Only later on once I began eating more and looking healthier did he say he was proud of me and finally acknowledge I was doing something right. 
And he says similar crap about my anxiety and depression now so as almost a “fuck you” i want to improve my own mental health for myself. 

I shut down a lot in confrontation and if anyone has any tips for anxiety during arguments, emotionally turning yourself off, etc I would love that. Anything helps. Thanks.",3.775755685040995,5.899810528541231,5.199754550611047,78.33086268241121,73.73572938689217,9.012097148455627,28.23848811426804,9.562709236259073,2.8862849378641773,1952,79,356,52,41,653,237,473,0.23600000000000002,0.6559999999999999,0.10800000000000001,-0.9972,1,1,1,0,5,0,45.0,2,1,0,6,17,35,12,4,13,0,27,18,7,8,4,87,67,42,0,5,18,0,6,3,0,2,5,4,1,0,28,30,3,5,11,1,0,6,8,22,0,0,13,13,49,12,49,48,17,59,0,4,2,3,30,25,4,12,27,238,77,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20213629729420798,0.06968961318370635,0.0,0.0,0.055988635305303264,0.0,0.0,0.0457578441769812,0.07055686738443848,0.3088487682771168,0.0,0.0,0.09409804468145024,0.0,0.05537192375365204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0517399756905483,0.0,0.0,0.0743138169895153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474130371257008,0.0,0.0,0.06870811593630632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054972027522848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159093434989198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542347330392604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20655589860374568,0.0,0.15137888341206834,0.0,0.0,0.30017363793542845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571720541679561,0.13609043647227104,0.1442107262825526,0.0,0.07371022652758741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06220625950883735,0.0,0.0,0.07648213527536968,0.0,0.05381600384932745,0.14836953188377186,0.07412482690777822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06027643185161865,0.0,0.06905644296708173,0.21457057050328227,0.0,0.07973607558619654,0.045101429152890345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023072462567985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395896002429342,0.05484833734223177,0.0,0.07124780423674522,0.0,0.06880608293917001,0.0,0.0986199003237918,0.0,0.0,0.11909473592643995,0.0565045986409926,0.0752775615488488,0.0,0.11441094454131273,0.12145928931466952,0.06366911063501733,0.08982992971719171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20343008499545007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978573753624052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21497714726693415,0.0,0.051175216986848064,0.0,0.07894744682366077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360848788464321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764257681828885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04310613015316233,0.0,0.0,0.07224165143993097,0.0,0.05746320354899472,0.0,0.2140390549819712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760157834929113,0.06906970733616935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057012526233103565,0.05180124651913237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05373592762364584,0.056255408165358935,0.0,0.07034356124029263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06194933944786525,0.0,0.0,0.17881144421626494,0.0,0.0,0.05341880186317725,0.03923591390825773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747589484360055,0.0,0.07318953675392963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17434452758234872,0.1482154690556249,0.055519279055764835,0.039687942768968136,0.21363891386898448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797228155233073,0.0,0.06857176616511902,0.0477991478588515,0.0,0.0,0.0433309787316916
mentalhealth,_strawchewer_,2020/03/12,"cant stay on my meds help I'm not entirely sure this is the right place but here goes (sorry if it's not the right place btw). So for as long as I can remember I have not been able to stick to my medication (I'm prescribed celexa) it's always been this way. And I have done EVERYTHING like setting an alarm,  getting my mom to remind me, getting a cute little box , putting it where it see it , etc. I really dont know what to do , this taking it for a few weeks/months and then stopping is so brutal. Knowing how well I've been makes my depression sO much worse when I'm off of it , which I think makes it even harder to get back on it. Also im the only person I've ever heard of who does this and it makes me feel dumb tbh so that dosent help either. So I guess I'm wondering if anybody has any advice or literally anything I could try so I could be consistent ? thanks :)",1.1963116057233698,2.9338752702702706,3.06925278219396,92.44022257551671,80.08108108108108,6.298887122416534,20.07154213036566,7.285733465282438,0.33798887122416543,675,17,155,9,17,226,116,185,0.134,0.75,0.11599999999999999,-0.6805,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,15,9,2,1,6,0,16,1,0,4,2,27,36,19,0,4,8,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,18,3,0,1,6,0,0,1,5,4,1,0,5,3,14,5,14,28,4,19,0,1,1,0,6,9,1,5,7,98,32,0,0.1340962367424542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103729057320446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723671207530468,0.11157881119527548,0.0,0.0,0.09119003934076272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034977709918778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311172878823503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21412986705751408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549689221313528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173485204319145,0.13722700740650542,0.15715979076549766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14955275070717647,0.08856929967666198,0.12129772328798773,0.0,0.0,0.12051705100885815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780308643807867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101792472395969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14772212291522047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976376172222144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448469467116068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739156958819294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655126478098134,0.13439965756134822,0.0,0.11867094975459015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26853083789979443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489506891882338,0.13508785087841052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570518917802864,0.10703433681510366,0.0,0.09857616331645556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198623065048906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708766159054125,0.280204052933513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348037555552791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590548298760001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519048957301148,0.2290349069773326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10685733918543812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010975841257507,0.0,0.1429287462954266,0.0,0.11211045834869976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12638411616598738,0.0,0.10082368154775337,0.0,0.0,0.12345779839485853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592345393584072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104254243996801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643935106011253,0.0,0.0,0.12056862114208802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454216485847043,0.0,0.0,0.13665552140256712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wilderogers,2020/03/12,"Trauma trigger responses? If something triggers you to flashback to a traumatic event/recall it, does that include feeling a certain type of age regression? Not sure how to explain it right now, does anyone get what I mean? Like can the trigger sort of make your mind go back to the age it's stuck remembering?",4.8452631578947365,7.289485456140351,5.003368421052631,79.49557894736844,71.63157894736842,7.3670175438596495,34.20701754385965,8.238735603445708,2.9949396491228075,249,13,41,4,5,78,46,57,0.183,0.72,0.098,-0.7447,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,5,2,15,8,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,3,6,7,0,6,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,5,24,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20728416623909215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22795112817812724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5188493673193276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14989361762386244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548824661395268,0.0,0.16847890619204026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14483009987014395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19788213610367406,0.0,0.0,0.3229200746628512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29932917345254223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33581914263677193,0.2531659882498855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22822106944334314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793998529788926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CardiBOfficial,2020/03/12,"Am I better with or without meds? Ok, I'm supposed to be sleeping for work, but I feel the need to type all this out and hopefully get some helpful responses. This is going to be an emotional word vomit, but I'll try to keep it cohesive. (35, M) I have brain damage from an injury as an infant, lots of issues with memory, concentration and speech. I have a lot of serious issues with anxiety and depression. I'm autistic(?) or something like that. Socially inept, to say the very least. I'm functional, but just barely. If I never get therapy or meds, I'll still manage to function, barely. My fear is that experimenting with meds could topple what little in my life I have going for me. **I can't lose this job!** I work 8p-8a, so I have to be fully awake all night, and get plenty of sleep during the day. So, no insomnia, no drowsiness. If the meds make me manic or super anxious or suicidal or anything that would jeopardize this job I'm already barely clinging onto, then I'd rather just suffer through life without them. If seeing a therapist and getting on the right meds is going to be an arduous process of trial and error I really don't care enough to go through with it. However, all the same, I can't live like this either.",2.649130434782609,4.894917676348548,4.507310120873175,81.41035359913407,77.63070539419087,7.510806422514883,25.001082446328702,8.456263369488248,1.9511975825365329,964,35,178,20,23,327,139,241,0.183,0.722,0.095,-0.9778,3,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,1,5,6,13,0,1,12,1,17,7,3,1,4,46,36,22,1,8,18,0,1,2,0,1,4,2,0,1,11,12,0,1,1,0,0,4,8,6,0,0,0,4,16,7,30,30,10,15,0,4,1,0,5,6,0,13,7,124,27,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280399652281672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819918807054238,0.11548122887817065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841196065685017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040663334982854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411303039484913,0.0,0.0,0.1042216590951984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161557116356077,0.0,0.0,0.06592442809303976,0.0,0.08804325108985743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498545880449397,0.0,0.1056221625334044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999226780601153,0.0,0.1150276367218899,0.051686275271536304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21362611448100968,0.0,0.2323793970932315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851693455508781,0.0,0.0,0.10152904082853548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21338543160669315,0.2028781842571311,0.09085918965397537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444041746006976,0.09988054899411083,0.10245282423035526,0.09026348078933354,0.0,0.0,0.1143597410322535,0.0,0.17381017290935522,0.0,0.0,0.06823366278102214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5677253593978321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757959667433688,0.07883954308542274,0.0,0.0,0.09592797805535667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548572748360558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729662520328015,0.0,0.08129066083869721,0.0,0.0,0.08145732204929082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045906995650588,0.10420197332718308,0.0,0.07869512528287381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08163424320247567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118137588955226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689922438265432,0.11868707112757268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940170657673758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434346496458449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19707580775313047,0.0,0.14883697766157133,0.0,0.0,0.07261523963091555,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helpmeimsadthrowaway,2020/03/12,"Help I keep hallucinating on Zoloft / Sertraline 
Hallucinations

Hi! I’ve been on Sertraline for almost a year now. On 150mg a day. I’ve been to hundreds of doctors as I keep neglecting my treatment and moving but each dr increases my dose and pushes me out the door.

Recently I’ve been having severe symptoms, I’ve been really strongly visually hallucinating. I’m not talking about like an odd shape I literally imagined the floor crumbling underneath me and was convinced I was going to drop in to hell. I saw stuff like the world look like I was trapped in a game, and lots of dark haunting scary looking people. In the night I kept walking up as I was certain I heard someone walking in the house and kept seeing someone walk in to the room who wasn’t there. I’ve been having severe tremors so sometimes I can’t pick anything up and I wake up in the night soaked in sweat. 

I was wondering if anyone had a similar experience? Do you think this could be the tablets?",3.5900534759358287,5.877809716577546,4.7278074866310185,80.75877005347597,74.8288770053476,7.608556149732621,29.71657754010695,8.4952907291091,2.4432909090909103,775,35,143,15,17,254,113,187,0.20600000000000002,0.737,0.055999999999999994,-0.9845,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,5,8,1,0,13,0,18,7,2,1,1,24,31,11,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,5,1,2,0,3,8,0,5,3,1,0,7,3,2,0,0,16,5,17,6,25,13,3,33,1,1,4,0,7,19,1,4,9,90,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638961725274641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444487881729322,0.0,0.1346900060531511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13068061326582098,0.0,0.0,0.10555638549820437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16752758538882062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010487572944776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930198787117094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097074357147996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888581712248228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909624831521919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398889919495815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748903854901452,0.0,0.0,0.1391500400218602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17395988224509848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30719449298472085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347115372149805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485395011897923,0.0,0.1616086291636618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304272291259229,0.0,0.0,0.369810750457084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773614128924205,0.0,0.1618780715755711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18736791908942252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701202713948779,0.0,0.1315552055027108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487588498093324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749780056671455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540088535890134
mentalhealth,orchidtime,2020/03/12,"one of my school subjects is giving me severe anxiety I do other subjects and whenever i do them i feel perfectly fine, but when it comes to this subject i want to start crying, i get really bad headaches trying to do the work, i feel really stupid, going into the class makes me feel irritable and upset. i'm a perfectionist and have never had this with the subject in the past, what can i do to cope?",7.233374999999999,6.018741587499999,8.287500000000001,71.26750000000003,64.375,11.5,32.5,10.686352973137794,3.330874999999999,317,10,60,7,4,109,55,80,0.265,0.624,0.11,-0.9564,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,2,1,5,1,1,5,0,8,0,0,1,2,14,19,5,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,1,3,11,2,8,18,0,8,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,44,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19595369831529064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138741679753747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22065014917440007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813682437402457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3885507142016588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13382756337417934,0.2457219810315366,0.1455756875366123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17098180814202604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19755831770452725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17357355868200736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24452372151102444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32819191103887324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592370114073782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893760720924469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181303964034621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17390872474067667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510836363211966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186479917109534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arix18,2020/03/12,"Hustle Culture in the Workforce (U.S. 18+) Hi Everyone!

If you are interested in assisting with my research, you can click on the following link to complete a short 10-minute survey: [https://baruch.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_0JIyyHQFXvFG6K9](https://baruch.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_0JIyyHQFXvFG6K9)

I am currently conducting research for my MA in Corporate Communications thesis on Hustle Culture and the Implications for our Workforce.

This study defines hustle culture as an unspoken agreement between supervisors and employees, which then determines a supervisor’s minimum expectation of an employee’s productivity capability. The purpose of this research study is to examine the impacts hustle culture has on employee performance, employee satisfaction, and the quality of professional relationships in the workplace.

Thanks!",13.964703065134106,18.044439474137945,11.205632183908047,37.68036398467436,50.81034482758621,15.155555555555555,53.40613026819923,13.383793397009326,9.568470498084292,713,47,64,29,9,214,79,116,0.0,0.8909999999999999,0.109,0.9059,5,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,1,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,11,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,7,6,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,3,17,7,0,11,0,0,1,0,10,8,0,1,2,47,9,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5234120577386095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4770164302504316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5359645833760496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4596053834013556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uglynichebandtshirt,2020/03/12,"I only know normal, healthy people, and I'd really like to know what's wrong with me Hi. I'm sort of looking for an outsiders opinion, I guess?

About two years ago I was diagnosed with ADHD, shortly before I moved out of my parents house and started at university.

I've been living by myself, in a house with four other girls actually, since then. Going through life as a semi-adult, and having semi-adult autonomy, has revealed new issues that I didn't realise were issues before now.

I started cognitive-behavioural-therapy late last year (2019), which has been helpful in getting me to recognise and verbalise some of my issues, but I feel like I'm still spiralling. I alienate everyone around me, I act out, and I keep having what I can only describe as manic episodes.

I've been coping with these issues by myself all my life, as my parents aren't exactly healthy or happy, and don't like the idea of anything being wrong with their kid, but without the routine I'm losing my grip a bit. I drink, and I smoke, and I don't want to stop, but I want someone to care about me enough to want me to stop. If that makes any sense.

I was convinced that I had BPD, and I told this to my therapist. Initially she told me that she hasn't been trained in either ADHD or BPD/Personality disorders, so she didn't want to make any bold claims, but the last time I saw her she said that she didn't think I was that self-destructive. Or in her words ""self-destructive enough for a diagnosis of BPD"".

I can't explain it all, and writing it down makes me feel more like an imposter than anything.

I've been referred back to a psychiatrist by my GP, for a reassessment of ADHD and a look into personality disorder diagnosis but the waiting list is so long it could take years.

I don't really know anyone who isn't neurologically typical. I have one friend who is diagnosed autistic and, while there's some cross over, she can't tell me whether any or all of this still falls into the ADHD bracket.

My therapist assumes that my issues with emotionality are ADHD symptoms, and my GP says it's just depression, but I feel like an alien. I literally cannot control my thoughts or my actions, and they jump around and change so drastically that I can't get a handle on it.

When I first got diagnosed with ADHD, I told the doctor that my main issues were with my emotions and mood swings, and I was sort of brushed off. Medication doesn't work, and I'm sick of taking it.

I don't know what to do, or say here anymore. Just: has any of this resonated with anyone? Specifically ADHDers? The mood swings, and thought-patterns, and manic episodes? Is this normal for someone with ADHD?

This didn't make much sense, I don't think, but if you have anything - anything is useful to me at this point, aha.",6.651894218942188,6.341290081180817,7.022420664206643,76.89401230012301,65.16236162361623,9.735891758917589,33.56482164821648,9.21078282632365,2.8236802460024606,2192,84,422,34,30,715,240,542,0.054000000000000006,0.843,0.10300000000000001,0.9818,2,0,2,0,0,0,78.0,0,1,2,4,16,16,0,0,18,0,45,11,0,6,4,100,88,45,0,9,20,2,4,5,1,0,10,3,0,3,29,36,1,5,15,1,0,7,18,4,0,4,23,11,67,10,62,63,12,47,0,2,3,0,30,18,0,15,27,286,96,2,0.0,0.0,0.05478922539176838,0.0,0.4723259694321398,0.0,0.0497689772319516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15272155596853396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05568055461184376,0.0785154985764006,0.0,0.184809544783643,0.09996155000507892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043171885254647324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955501783416627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06129557975053766,0.0,0.2121372288347018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05724336501233682,0.0,0.05939375340613825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297116680254318,0.044827053909577454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483574335964656,0.17095736916240958,0.0,0.0,0.12869360892004608,0.05746658141472124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05500052902630535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12631068525678302,0.0,0.11602517280538265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05364876201789615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516549286921632,0.12032956808476107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047756737829305326,0.0,0.0,0.04337733287153985,0.0,0.058666680964240575,0.0,0.031908383450804864,0.0,0.04490412513802638,0.0,0.061849826542685865,0.0,0.0,0.059767183146375163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037632675667547334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295671211082934,0.0,0.06338064474158911,0.0,0.35160350322056216,0.0,0.049904077552026506,0.0,0.0,0.12342285411259372,0.09153101038582744,0.06333377940584946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931346466498329,0.1371475654230372,0.0,0.04957688663724144,0.04968638084215443,0.0942949824127752,0.06281166943088126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14990835872743088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05655997883031395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059673036609052564,0.04127288778448808,0.0,0.0,0.05422499728128998,0.0,0.0,0.11001996581013174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03804516922479483,0.08540130010310294,0.0,0.0,0.1246843112580836,0.0,0.0,0.03892373472956389,0.09804694675041822,0.0,0.0,0.05307498319291035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719355925435494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05340656141705374,0.08929719620435413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714254134639995,0.0,0.0,0.046443558385393664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514261295112078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947915621710754,0.0,0.08967461891729726,0.09387913286986273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058355944208938665,0.0844278039343155,0.0,0.0490730295029486,0.0,0.06420647137158883,0.13037687931248518,0.0,0.07195064106857142,0.0,0.08914539884096302,0.032738484131486716,0.0,0.0,0.16094628605368844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054845311017586655,0.0,0.0,0.04849108024697574,0.0,0.0,0.13246262978263454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05412158324983578,0.0,0.04087408276542622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277104913438325,0.0,0.1084662304229426
mentalhealth,jdilly701,2020/03/12,"Severe depression after multiple injuries Since the powerlifting subreddit wouldn’t accept this, I’ll post it here and maybe get some help. It’s niche and lifting related but it’s effecting my mental health. Also, this is a copy and paste of what I posted over in powerlifting. 


So to start off I tweaked my back with 655 on squat after missing a re rack, and that had me down for a while due to a compression fracture. Things started to look up and I hit 705 on squat but it felt like I gave myself a concussion due to all the pressure. After throwing up 5 times in two days, I decided maybe I should give my body a little rest. A week goes by and I feel fine, Monday lift went good, but then I had a pretty serious testicular injury during some “extracurricular activity”. Now I’m back after all those months and I feel like I’ve lost everything. 

I’ve been injured before, but not multiple injuries in such quick succession. I can’t get my motivation or confidence back and I honestly don’t know how to. Can anyone relate and maybe share what you did to get back into the swing of things? 

P.s., I have a history with depression and anger issues and I’ve been in psychiatric facilities, and right now I feel like I did at my lowest, right before I was checked into one because everyone felt I was a “danger to myself and others.”",4.619357405140762,6.063864546511631,5.805014279885764,77.62911260709917,70.2015503875969,9.307547939616486,27.92003263973889,9.682069395223575,2.633578294573644,1055,37,197,25,19,352,152,258,0.14300000000000002,0.711,0.146,-0.0516,3,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,4,12,17,2,1,13,0,15,3,1,3,2,40,34,23,0,2,6,0,5,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,13,17,0,0,10,0,1,2,4,8,0,2,13,6,25,9,31,18,5,44,0,4,1,0,5,17,0,3,26,137,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965669489350817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443402087530215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3714095613639952,0.0,0.07361053190391838,0.0,0.20550556002362813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413049801997606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787635540167216,0.0,0.2080105269298892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538564421762908,0.10852593002298068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317058754400287,0.17253339697764372,0.2318855985656863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892669799606256,0.1158382625302886,0.0,0.10128274574382223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835588022706335,0.0,0.0,0.08093887654079603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12603582761377435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636325330400676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769829490261608,0.12102725472882145,0.0,0.0,0.10140296702986942,0.0,0.1318172810999222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639409410334805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169165399995005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963847094665326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182605143632757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527337899673655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23129794996234015,0.12285025371559538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062465524950069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641767524544915,0.0,0.09988897604515252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709406386474557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16044721508092394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041264215864115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795913467620095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686159385055132,0.0,0.0,0.11194018953177357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rorhunt,2020/03/12,"Need some advice Hows it going everyone? This is my first ever post on this sub but I will, most likely, be posting again in the near future. So basically I need some advice on my mental health, as I don't really know what is going on up there. I have booked a appointment with my general practitioner so that he can refer me to a specialist but I wanted to do this to sort of get another persons opinion on what it might be. I won't act on what I am told, I will still listen to my practitioner but I want see what other people think it is.

Right, so I'm 24 and my life so far hasn't been the greatest. My dad died when I was 19, which meant that I had to go to work to help out my mum and brother, the job I was doing had a toxic social environment, a lot of abuse, the sort of usual in trade work, so not sure how that has affected me. To top it all off, my mum left me to look after my brother when I was 20/21 and this just put a lot more pressure/stress on me as you can probably imagine.

I have eventually changed my job, so I no longer am in that environment and this might be why my mental health is surfacing. But basically, my mood is like a roller coaster. When I'm on a high, I'm happy, motivated, know what I want to do and and I'm going after it. But a few minutes later I can be in the lowest of lows, sometimes I feel like the world is literally about to end. It isn't I know and I can control myself enough to not do anything silly but, knowing that something isn't right is the worst. 

Here is another plot twist though, when I am physically doing something, I'm usually on a high and i have no form of anxiety what so ever, but when I stop, things quickly make a turn for the lows and I have no idea what it is. I also struggle to concentrate. As a child I rarely did any studying and my parents pretty much just allowed me to do what ever it is I wanted. Now that I am studying for an academic qualification, I can finally see the lapses in focus/concentration. Another thing is, I do a lot of daydreaming, its like at a stage where I could probably refer to it as escapism.

This is the bulk of it, thanks for reading and hope you can help!",3.8171963686298436,4.090167913716815,5.734638388770218,81.70880530973454,71.19026548672565,8.88935001525786,27.53310955141898,8.939507131559953,1.9386907842538916,1675,54,363,30,29,584,202,452,0.11699999999999999,0.79,0.09300000000000001,-0.9014,5,0,2,0,1,0,48.0,0,2,0,6,29,14,0,1,24,0,55,3,0,7,5,68,87,38,1,8,11,6,1,4,0,5,3,1,0,2,35,13,0,2,12,3,1,6,10,4,0,1,9,5,52,9,51,68,14,61,0,2,3,0,16,30,0,12,26,283,87,9,0.0,0.10182227060920307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16795489702386585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872444803688871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584406683016841,0.27033990941126,0.06574220131691473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707195080431958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091082447366622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963865787861845,0.06861436087021228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918989507898993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611540573157402,0.08879674641295543,0.0,0.0,0.2332070497063829,0.0,0.08211727508930917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043452746736418184,0.0613939997378873,0.0,0.094140687272757,0.0,0.07309867050406305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04489896689237903,0.0,0.1953617867723283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148241329607623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182695779832996,0.0,0.0,0.11520462593742152,0.18159606199680806,0.0,0.08535565146330733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701334464804023,0.0,0.0,0.17056006285142913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18891672579677887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337169890129587,0.0,0.06070042766325184,0.16793952268894086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216612946025147,0.0,0.0,0.2191837983284448,0.0,0.0,0.057364165866963024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17321023070667504,0.18233290451470094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317418990578798,0.12744361744926655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542378520762196,0.0,0.0,0.05957846764897706,0.0750375944861987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646093629188998,0.08742966378146433,0.18531102194807686,0.0,0.0,0.08639125085568232,0.0,0.0,0.08596108153736423,0.0,0.055053971605538606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467808669119214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369626410972554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760279073378281,0.0,0.13231827328793985,0.08499470688484535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863005848768924,0.07184787019361905,0.09844148880394407,0.08984087435813189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099538354027652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912000364742654,0.0,0.0,0.11418654536662705,0.05506548858955128,0.08443347726414514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211727508930917,0.0,0.0,0.09347567652109837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189296747258379,0.0,0.20275342430614546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754552077732553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512752101724345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,00Dusty,2020/03/12,Has anyone had a positive experience with anti-depressants? All I have heard is bad stuff about them. Like they change your personality. I want some help but I dont want to be drugged numb...,1.9258333333333368,4.7525599166666685,3.279111111111113,84.37700000000002,88.72222222222223,7.3244444444444445,21.088888888888885,8.238735603445708,1.5552288888888892,151,5,30,4,5,49,33,36,0.065,0.691,0.245,0.5023,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,0,1,6,9,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,6,1,3,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,1,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21203486172741728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531956031883557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207913474226625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611831277143855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3553990494161782,0.0,0.3516661131952022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29663026898193623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032576835473225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14814942577192627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647804723138959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3471411847069598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3577216715077066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mishmabsoota,2020/03/12,"Trying to deal with a draining friend with mental health issues who constantly berates and lashes out at me I am at the end of my tether, so I would really appreciate some advice please.

A friend of mine - who I have known for nearly 20 years - had a bit of a bad turn in the past three years. He (34) is based in one country, and I (F, 34) currently live halfway across the world. He is what you would consider ""friends who are family"". Or least I thought so.

Lately, I am finding it very difficult to deal with him, and I feel that I should cut him out of my life.

**A summary of his situation:**

1) His marriage fell through a couple of years ago. His decision. He has one young child (bit of a mess, he broke up with her whilst she was pregnant, something I never agreed with). They were having problems for years; he claims she is the reason for many of his mental health issues.

2) Since then he has gone from not drinking - to drinking regularly. Sleeping around, making friends with weird people etc

3) It reached a stage where last year he was talking to me about suicide, and how he has planned his death several times. He talks about how no-one in his life is there for him (mum, dad, ex-wife, sister).

4) Now - he has fallen into trouble with the law, accused of something pretty serious. I have no doubt in my mind he is innocent (despite the changes of the past few years), so that's not even a question. Just to add context to his background, he is educated to doctorate level, intelligent and has a good job (he's currently suspended until police make a decision whether to charge him) and has never been in trouble with the law before.

**The issues I encounter:**

1) At the best of times, he is quite insensitive in the way he deals with people. He can be quite cutting with his words at times, and I feel in the past, he hasn't been there for me when I needed him the most (a couple of situations). That being said, he was married, in a different country...etc. so I kind of get it. People get busy with life.

2) Because of a childhood complex, he doesn't like people giving him advice. So even when you try to have a conversation with him, and offer some solutions, he lashes out about it and gets angry.

3) I have recommended therapy because I know how much it helps. He says he has been, but was never given any medication (he's not sure if he wants to take meds), and since the one time he went, he hasn't said anything else about it. TBH, I don't think he even went back.

4) More recently - with this ""trouble with the law"" situation... he would send messages like: ""I am going to be charged... I just know it. I am going to lose my child. I have no faith in the justice system. I cannot go to prison. If I am charged, that's it; I am ending my life.""

5) I personally feel he's not taking enough action. He's not speaking to many lawyers, for instance. He is with one lawyer who doesn't seem to be doing much. He comes across as being very indifferent about the whole process. He asks me what I would do if I am in his position. I tell him. His response? ""You don't think I haven't thought of that? You think I am just sitting there doing nothing? You think you're all high and mighty. I have never been in trouble with the law. I am so scared. I have no idea what to do or how anything works."" etc.

I ask him if he trusts the lawyer he's with. He says: ""I don't know; how do I even figure that out?""

6) After his latest outburst, I told him to get his act together and enough with the victim mentality. In hindsight, my choice of words were not great - but there's only so much I can take. I attempted to explain to him that the concept of victim mentality also applies to genuine victims (I had spoke to this with my therapist before), I never once implied he was faking it, but in order for an individual to create change they have to leave the victim mentality and go into survival mode. To me, he is being defeatist right now when he needs to fight to clear his name. No-one in the world can do something like that for you but yourself. It's what I would do personally.

7) He responded by saying he thought I was a ""disgusting human being"" and an ""insensitive prick"". And for the past 24 hours has latched on the words ""victim mentality"" when I fully explained what my point was. He then proceeded to say ""No matter how many times I tell you, I have no idea what's going on. You're just assuming I am sat at home being defeatist."" Earlier, he made a reference about how I have always butted in about his life. The funny thing is... It has always been him coming to me with the problems. I even went through old emails today to make sure I am not going crazy. 

**What do I do?**

I am tired. I feel I am his emotional punchbag. Despite him calling me disgusting, I am trying to be there with support just for the sake of his child.

Every time he has gotten angry accusing me of having no idea what is going on, I have reminded him that I am not in his environment. I am not in the middle of it all, therefore I just go by what he is telling me from halfway across the world. Which is usually not much. He is the one who usually initiates conversation with messages like ""I know I am going to jail. I just know it."" I try my best to be there and listen, whilst trying to offer some hope.

I have offered financial support. I have offered to talk to lawyers I know. I have offered friends who are connected to law. He hasn't taken any of my offers.

He complains about advice given to him. Then asks me what I would do if I were in his position. I answer, and then he gets angry at me. You know that feeling of that you cannot win, no matter what? I don't know what he wants, and I don't know how to help him.

I have had my own mental health issues, but my personality is just to own it and do something about it. I made myself go to a psychiatrist; I took the medication; I made myself go to a therapist. I strongly believe that no-one in the world can help you but you - you need to be the one to take action to save your soul.

I have never wanted anything from my friendships, but it doesn't feel good to absorb this much negativity on a delay basis. It does affect me. His words can be immensely hurtful at times. I understand that this might be due to what he is going through, but there's only so much I can take before I am at breaking point.

I apologise for this being a long read, but I wanted to offer as much background as possible. I'm hoping I can connect with some mental health specialists, or individuals who have encountered something similar. Thank you.",2.3317436654050923,4.30377390687023,3.8631246391686473,86.97307364167044,77.48854961832059,6.662903329270638,24.061838475848354,7.6340224058082224,1.1506661107190967,5078,171,1042,74,119,1683,423,1310,0.126,0.789,0.085,-0.9939,5,0,7,0,1,1,231.0,0,14,2,11,55,56,11,2,57,0,137,17,2,17,11,196,226,67,2,23,37,3,6,4,5,8,13,9,1,7,57,52,2,1,40,3,0,25,38,29,0,7,38,15,166,27,168,166,28,144,2,3,0,0,175,54,1,20,63,729,223,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943871821288892,0.03309181658896058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02985371126938785,0.06212502320783843,0.0,0.0,0.05077293125532476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921610795521334,0.03323264272942112,0.10469877213065787,0.0,0.0,0.0287053539796124,0.03116995520942943,0.0455134513429221,0.0,0.09529819033617258,0.04205942811149623,0.07835348831754875,0.0,0.08151190543319344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03811928326020093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898282438418547,0.06431496923473114,0.0,0.04034171655875903,0.0,0.0,0.0826124262009204,0.0,0.0,0.1154603451978264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039003111578594166,0.0,0.038210019131147716,0.03266874542371392,0.0,0.0,0.07314063981470846,0.0,0.0,0.031185389881185837,0.041992524884155474,0.06612864594104911,0.07714612499035316,0.12490231804252475,0.12328437942139513,0.0,0.03145310827580768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03519249066801652,0.0,0.11325452225396368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03411999947712347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442097892441459,0.0,0.0975199388418086,0.035811445651571766,0.25459386908028386,0.06262320351530598,0.0,0.04115773032041722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872508887499054,0.0,0.0,0.07506685912822901,0.03944241501656444,0.03744619239085358,0.07415652062067668,0.03676366801363691,0.0,0.03996377366704538,0.12642699053089362,0.0,0.15585610806485925,0.0370454111739253,0.0,0.0,0.038874653394059946,0.184646039084268,0.030429873953140844,0.042111169016319255,0.03952830308846684,0.0,0.0,0.13184049440560064,0.07295246690643957,0.0,0.032964093917486184,0.033036897546334085,0.0,0.04176401364982677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597092483824716,0.0747565077895874,0.11354379583334015,0.0,0.0,0.04146649764195718,0.0752144227117704,0.30096819191013674,0.039602456198476715,0.0376938247643404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19209886078368815,0.0830417355206954,0.17275252936977473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03582025017321872,0.0,0.03917276753179965,0.039756461855417966,0.15177934112030889,0.056784051363955326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14254724671600724,0.10352289014299074,0.09778837418692504,0.0,0.040978397996293325,0.07058001618543941,0.04208526829896154,0.0,0.03797920555884987,0.0,0.07144174755189822,0.0,0.0,0.04181943738083017,0.0794125573250802,0.037341257469878965,0.0,0.023915293894577697,0.03838264496784926,0.03686001202590094,0.0,0.0,0.03188060250630808,0.0710209545526117,0.11874893168613496,0.03737499875692312,0.0,0.0,0.03398488156942467,0.0,0.042173579405067406,0.0,0.061761434584652886,0.1258853474376727,0.037358115242902064,0.0,0.0,0.14369673526813187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040834224619606285,0.08472590489266008,0.0703683438262566,0.0,0.1403419136876211,0.09001610524130596,0.09788722506037406,0.03436951204403037,0.04269142933258645,0.08668869680689288,0.0248011606757058,0.09568118736306744,0.0,0.08891030172610223,0.15237667735493673,0.042906671186164695,0.03538557004501516,0.03567151851738781,0.04147628693979364,0.1267270192564822,0.04060557686943779,0.0,0.03886304904331767,0.0,0.0,0.08222998653772491,0.0616042252327437,0.08807553004814764,0.029631733319259206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10381906442861852,0.0,0.04167890152926252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027177525545916053,0.0,0.0,0.15911388912339364,0.0,0.0,0.14424023971895486
mentalhealth,TrueStormwatcher,2020/03/12,"I have s superhero dysphoria For a couple of years now I have a wierd dysphoria- I have dreams were I have superpowers, usually  Telekinesis  related, and when I wake up I tsill got the instinct to use them. I would sometimes try and fail to activate my powers and it feels like part of me is missing, almost like I lost a limb and it would really hurt not to be able to use my powers. When I sleep I almost allways have them but when I'm awake its just a really wierd dysphorian feeling.  


I was wondering if more people have expirianced that and if its got a name, so I can read about it.   
I'm not going to get professional help with that because it doesn't really hurt me and I don't want to do anything about it, I just want to see if I'm not the only one that has gone throu this.",2.6522507122507117,4.110269296296302,4.566296296296296,84.5198717948718,75.17283950617283,8.441405508072174,24.18993352326686,9.057496981413335,1.7375198480531813,614,19,132,14,13,210,91,162,0.102,0.825,0.073,-0.5215,3,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,4,9,7,0,0,7,0,17,2,2,2,0,28,35,14,0,7,9,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,0,3,2,0,2,5,5,0,1,6,3,20,2,14,26,2,9,0,5,1,0,4,1,0,6,8,92,31,3,0.1605207145804076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.321476616966195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13209487084839522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785193770880983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17761311753043396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16232819279934016,0.11467603056979853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386544812009364,0.0,0.09122762129736478,0.0,0.25676615859259505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759365135180377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3436814898534241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15684462585901138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752273220355259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877299050842994,0.12208323677882772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17382829126113852,0.0,0.11128485204718733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605641537654759,0.0,0.30850104038405607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791422683360826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063664072074268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875909122406692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898302834365793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27727671706663304,0.17679088891458095,0.0,0.18935855281566136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740778676072072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280586201472509,0.0,0.0,0.1033700773114254
mentalhealth,EntOak,2020/03/12,"I want to get help..Where do I start?  Hello, I'm hoping someone here can help me out with where to start. I've had symptoms of depression for the past few years, but it's been getting exponentially worse lately. I'll random just start crying in the middle of the day, and can't stop having negative thoughts. I really want to get help and begin working on this. I used to be too afraid to go to a therapist, but now I think it's necessary and am willing to do anything to begin to feel like the normal me again.

My question is where do I start? Do I look for therapists in my area, or psychiatrists? I tried to do some research but honestly there's so much info I'd rather ask people who have experience and can point me in the right direction. Thank you in advance.",2.8853449131513638,4.6301338322580685,4.438064516129035,84.4801736972705,75.19354838709677,7.607940446650125,24.826302729528532,8.384062270229773,1.5704094292803972,604,20,123,11,13,202,100,155,0.066,0.7659999999999999,0.168,0.9276,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,2,10,6,0,1,6,0,16,1,0,1,0,25,37,9,0,5,6,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,5,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,3,2,14,4,21,32,3,27,0,1,1,0,7,12,0,5,14,83,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12374941055046396,0.0,0.14058441371877714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651846796013174,0.09698225479391262,0.0,0.12952153332343394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14709988200576607,0.0,0.0,0.07603632921408188,0.10743105387919727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357010466134579,0.0,0.08546406297960353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30238837090894355,0.0,0.0,0.1493606481154164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16963448243070747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346776552867387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628079902591788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054614178126357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733985664782634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355412698957293,0.1042541224771736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421571140773624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16845931332116132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963368768131989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842316259709904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741595445966605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4257571758830853,0.0,0.0,0.12572388909062918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15630174743249686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844912224416456,0.0,0.3492040843067322,0.0,0.09635702995088784,0.0,0.11938442435719444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10209772287835972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987949522939582,0.0,0.0,0.17739530038619722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947797430990816,0.0,0.15324942801500654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683938561495012
mentalhealth,kspkspksp,2020/03/12,Struggling I’ve been struggling the last couple of weeks. I don’t really want advice or encouragement. Just need to put this out into the void.,3.3055555555555562,6.173302518518517,4.0903703703703735,81.7666666666667,79.37037037037038,6.562962962962962,20.11111111111111,7.793537801064563,1.0820222222222209,116,3,20,2,3,37,24,27,0.187,0.667,0.146,-0.2975,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,4,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,12,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063100685024107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34683818956371004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555122243932277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324270615672064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151144793813635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20081088569184194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6553941532302084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18488718218048975,0.0,0.2514391840584155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,simrob99,2020/03/12,Anxiety coping I just wanted to know what are your coping mechanisms for anxiety I am currently going through a lot of anxiety right now such as health anxiety and general anxiety and I want to find different coping mechanisms that are healthy for the mind to try that could potentially help thanks.,9.264842767295598,9.815828188679244,9.333962264150944,59.60899371069184,59.566037735849065,15.368553459119502,42.19496855345911,14.06817628641468,6.99339496855346,246,13,37,11,3,81,38,53,0.146,0.688,0.165,0.4767,2,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,11,9,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,8,8,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7716487244204396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16107213625899858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21077426523740367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438574587054812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146528945970802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21443907055308328,0.0,0.0,0.1352213659889616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087045121902807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715112413901432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036988306094953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17228396137196136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18573412105982826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13696750483964393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379817196620998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xiaaolang,2020/03/12,People confuse anxiety with shyness and it's annoying It's really annoying bc when i talk about my anxiety to people they don't understand me.. Or try to prove that im only shy... I feel like only ppl who struggle w anxiety can understand..,2.410638297872339,4.9463266595744715,5.650468085106382,71.29400000000003,80.27659574468086,10.568510638297873,30.676595744680853,10.355215969177356,4.5234885106382965,191,10,32,8,5,70,36,47,0.337,0.614,0.05,-0.8885,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,2,5,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,5,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,5,1,4,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,18,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5318526099822051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717717741786705,0.16555859272411794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25032424429178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132188453181317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35250485695885386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32132544883004105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846170801381595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422700718529281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18626776087003885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573395653279662,0.0,0.0,0.4825091980913346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,michael246_r,2020/03/12,"I need help with anxiety I left school due to anxiety, I just can’t focus and have anxiety attacks, my ex hooked up with my best friend and I lost my right to drive which was my only therapy, how can I fix myself?",3.4446666666666665,3.9168276888888895,5.206666666666667,84.45000000000002,72.1111111111111,9.555555555555557,26.11111111111111,9.725611199111238,2.1054444444444442,166,5,37,4,3,57,33,45,0.2,0.603,0.196,0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,2,4,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,7,6,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,10,2,5,4,1,5,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,25,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5872940168068981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29112597785423017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685538312287015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19770959651594774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17152601668895984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780387584908237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793477513422401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18974842264909114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19462534309480314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218539292347775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25898693933551303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926467513847157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayhightimes,2020/03/12,"My friend now treats me differently after hearing about my past Right so I used to be bi kinda still am but like I don’t act on it but anyway I basically became closeted again because I don’t swing that way so I’m straight again kinda you know it’s weird anyway so one day I’m on a phone call to a friend who knew about my past and then she said something can’t remember what it was but anyways my friend who didn’t know was in the room with me and she just blurts it out I’ve never wanted to yell at her so much for saying that anyway I avoid my friend for a while hoping he’d forget but I know he hasn’t forgotten. today as a joke a set my phone wallpaper to Linus tech tips modelling his underwear and he saw it and has completely ghosted me now and it’s like really wtf he’s a friend that I’ve know for ages we play games all the time and it just pisses me off I’m still me it’s not like I’m a convicted child molester or anything. It’s the worst thing about being friends with guys is that the moment you’re outed about being gay you get treated like they never knew you. In fact this fucker already knew it was on my Facebook for a while and yet he treats me differently. Do women experience this too when they come out or get called out? Like for so long I’ve been ridiculed for being gay even when I wasn’t like I don’t give a shit if someone calls me fag or gay it’s not offensive to me but what does get to me is when someone you knew does it and treats you differently when they’ve know you for so long. 

Coming out in the uk is not easy yes I could find a friend group that accepts it but I want my friends and when I did try to make some gay friends the first one I spoke to started trying to flirt if you can call it that and made me so uncomfortable he creeped me out so much and even humiliated me I said no fuck this I ain’t gay anymore and that’s why I don’t say I’m bi anymore I had a girlfriend at the time too and it was just so horrible.",0.3305549333061819,2.3830692365339594,2.2067981875572755,95.77427629569291,84.97189695550351,5.399226148050097,18.65029019448121,6.7026698264267655,-0.1027838916607271,1552,40,367,18,46,513,182,427,0.156,0.688,0.156,-0.5820000000000001,3,1,1,0,0,0,7.0,1,7,2,1,36,34,7,1,18,1,29,11,2,3,4,69,62,42,1,6,17,0,0,6,10,0,0,7,2,3,30,24,0,1,12,3,0,3,15,10,0,3,18,8,51,24,39,38,5,53,0,0,1,9,50,18,4,9,36,239,81,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838732484143498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588663355309166,0.0,0.0,0.0659117338081189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04882544514747946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3271456536853667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13799028242759426,0.08397855930933618,0.0,0.0,0.06394970234138624,0.0,0.0,0.0516549414955057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510481049586874,0.0,0.0,0.14018414254761338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580458352194756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834872281687326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320579361694096,0.06812915198799607,0.0,0.0,0.5569339394875962,0.07404695629118052,0.12553970619800273,0.07683485755182898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930709173780838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027339746367734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955285795868006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200918333420293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347835573582095,0.0,0.0,0.14176391210923026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578825490414991,0.053464337286376666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775874871953315,0.0,0.12354910322050645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085495046076844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15292034706436272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051311198592156056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073253534997018,0.06840107981318404,0.1523782362582544,0.12739023913344302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822168322054372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13572923597608882,0.06166139335682028,0.0,0.0,0.0566919743675441,0.0,0.12792866555330715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0532118604252504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340860630903357,0.0,0.07592112477815248,0.0,0.0,0.10875911089741036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06917675549817551,0.0,0.0,0.09448474757056112,0.06357604299895495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227368890017044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaptainWhyte,2020/03/12,"Feeling hopeless about the future with a loss of all motivation. Hi, my names William (26) from the UK. I never really talk about my mental health outside of my family and gf but today I am feeling extra low and demotivated. I used to be doing great with life last year but it all disappeared quickly. Which was for the best and the worst, as my mental health when I had my great job was worse as I was away from family and friends. I lost my big job in London, lost my gf (ex-gf) and lost my apartment. Now I am back home staying with my mother. For a few months till about February I was very hopeful but with the job rejection after rejection I am really starting to loose hope. It drives me insane I have great experience, skills and a good degree but I can't find shit. I'm not one for giving up but I am running out of ideas and I'm terrified about what to do :(",2.1606818181818177,4.093416431818183,3.9193181818181837,86.55522727272732,77.86363636363637,7.127272727272729,22.363636363636363,8.07648339933343,1.1376659090909091,676,20,141,12,16,227,102,176,0.23800000000000002,0.556,0.20600000000000002,-0.6729999999999999,3,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,0,7,8,18,1,0,8,0,14,4,1,2,3,30,26,16,0,2,6,1,2,0,3,0,3,0,1,0,4,12,0,0,5,0,0,3,3,10,0,1,8,2,22,8,27,17,6,24,0,8,0,0,8,7,1,2,13,100,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384109244959024,0.09317052274231402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271580812139559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11852531260667618,0.2284523475635872,0.0,0.12253211310135427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074513101315184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936139053221836,0.0,0.0,0.11623514950850862,0.0,0.10162976236877877,0.0,0.4007636260013372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575913105497054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154113557502272,0.24069383697155602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136783644436354,0.0,0.0,0.3607208947916119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987678906593696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558436723058171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3968067469705441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24421719193040206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671494435827906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345204079275272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821064052122291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15524633037282348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12437695712611466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576315915076707,0.1291487027106067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739005002941584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485286197726055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046500348155142,0.0,0.09997608585747672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234802918574807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802806022781521
mentalhealth,nayminlwin,2020/03/12,"Problem with staying calm while in direct ""intellectual"" competition Not sure if this is asked before here..

But whenever I find myself in direct competition with someone (be it competitive e-sports, chess games and the like) I became generally, well, stopped being calm.

I would get cold hand and cold feet, my mind would go blank not knowing what to do in stressful situations of the game (like blitz chess). Occasionally my hands would be tingling after the game as the blood flows back.

I've noticed this since I was a teenager and is not seem to going away as I age into my 30s.

I think my problem is with ""intellectual"" competition. And I'm thinking that this does not seem to be affecting me just in playing competitive games. Any form of direct competition ""intellectually"" makes me really nervous and ultimately unmotivated. Strangely, this does not happen to me with physical activities, like sports.

Sorry, if this is really trivial but it can be debilitating at times.

Any tips on what I can do to overcome this?",6.791593710157244,8.614685651933701,7.637790055248621,65.10197195070126,65.40883977900553,10.210114747131323,33.26009349766256,10.389873798559362,3.8031594560136006,817,35,133,21,13,273,106,181,0.08900000000000001,0.84,0.071,-0.3235,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,0,4,12,0,2,5,0,17,5,4,2,1,37,29,12,0,7,10,0,2,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,11,10,0,1,6,8,0,3,5,4,1,0,1,4,15,8,22,20,1,18,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,4,9,90,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21428526943647616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14729242558312575,0.0,0.148027876684503,0.12114987966438462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13406749021641132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757544519172516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144002189756595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231585552962957,0.0,0.17908399378662387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393251476095076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658797175162751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309198815283473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051690209576766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15908538656355214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793771303814944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015172404797038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018672181868424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868638592973557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303309196804319,0.17709814348472086,0.0,0.0,0.13349563080225468,0.0,0.0,0.17636964661393878,0.0,0.16793240320734498,0.0,0.13172282821441444,0.1804784370636049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849348997381953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20190944768376584,0.0,0.0,0.0918714434064939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416606443740605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357671278661526,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,assgreengrass,2020/03/12,What should I do? So I'm the fat one in my friend group and I'm very Insecure about it and I'm trying to lose weight. Anyway so in my friend group they grab my tits or stomach as a joke and I tell them to stop but they don't take me seriously. What should I do if I want them to stop.?,-1.6763636363636358,0.12327371212121466,0.8578030303030317,103.60670454545456,92.1818181818182,4.512121212121213,12.795454545454547,5.985473137389443,-1.3419636363636358,219,3,61,2,8,74,41,66,0.10800000000000001,0.746,0.146,0.3486,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,4,1,4,6,0,1,2,0,5,4,3,0,0,11,10,9,0,4,3,0,2,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,3,3,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,2,12,3,7,8,0,4,0,1,0,1,9,2,1,2,2,39,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4617965920079574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343476069334651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20251509633391376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4997202542207136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22470533310015645,0.0,0.26121658806316483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20290614775427224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24659058700939146,0.17627521954607928,0.0,0.0,0.3639306535577971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,music_vip22,2020/03/12,"Unstoppable Supersonic Overthinking I can’t stop overthinking everything. Every situation I go through that has the potential to effect me, I overthink. I seem to question people’s motives more then normal. It’s even causing issues in my relationship. Even where if something doesn’t add up in what they say i overthink. Even on the phone with my SO, if I hear something odd or the phone cuts out my mind starts. But it’s with everything. I can’t stand looking at people while I’m even shopping, cuz if they look at me, I overthink what they might do and why they looked at me a certain way. I need help cuz I need peace in my head...",3.4604212860310426,5.646227089430897,4.216437546193646,84.74886917960093,74.85365853658536,7.3995565410199555,28.2549889135255,8.296473431620573,2.046063414634147,504,21,97,9,11,161,76,123,0.07400000000000001,0.8540000000000001,0.07200000000000001,0.2023,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,4,2,6,2,1,0,4,0,6,1,1,5,1,24,16,11,0,6,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,5,5,0,1,4,1,1,1,3,1,0,0,0,5,21,1,14,15,1,17,0,0,3,0,11,10,0,7,4,67,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16266744681434667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4183505529766995,0.0,0.13341537368497106,0.0,0.2846266997522741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899930564450614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16251116283446915,0.0,0.17847017818552646,0.0,0.1061376083420124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652746106698136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3989183761616527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798265043414987,0.15988676452744485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23482669457851565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15514783142336167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21955771353762413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738647056863674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17000694325049326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592501952964744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14415445476693026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17799025905045987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438087004310975,0.0,0.0,0.11207982696270992,0.0,0.0,0.13238636981400995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256896055886183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288481987540885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lostBlxck13,2020/03/12,"More than JUST anxiety and depression I'm consulting Reddit because I'm falling onto a low again . This time though I am not thinking or I'm thinking all over the place . I feel only numbness with no energy or sad with more energy and easily irritated. 

I seem to be overconfident or shy. 

What I am asking is does this sound normal and if not what should I do because my family churns out poor advice and my brother doesn't get it. I also have no one in my life because of my state of mind 

(I might sound insane but that's why I'm seeing if Reddit can help)",3.0822807017543847,4.557519859649126,5.083333333333336,81.17833333333336,74.08771929824562,8.224561403508767,24.070175438596486,8.841846274778883,1.7540070175438591,440,13,87,9,9,152,77,114,0.187,0.769,0.044000000000000004,-0.8735,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,10,2,0,0,1,25,21,12,0,4,9,1,1,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,6,7,0,0,4,0,1,1,5,4,0,1,0,4,11,0,10,18,3,10,0,3,1,0,4,6,0,7,2,61,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146198424570065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17563798938861436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16801630841889795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20532435272507973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4016531317600876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891669516564759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19219964681420534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20704756761167464,0.0,0.1110515004223914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474758249597765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14721332397646256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15513112690377656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329926660972139,0.2217636371650773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21519071635734474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488269362589834,0.1670384717147668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294665489241375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750166322962977,0.1999428551646979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28146000373488994,0.2157853079562559,0.0,0.1280679884025089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981818660531373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SunnyWinter1,2020/03/12,"Why am I depressed even though I have done multiply things for curing my numbness? I love life and I try my hardest to get out of my numbness I have had for almost 4 years now.

If I had to rate the amount of pleasure I have experienced through my whole life it would look a bit like this:

2000 - ?/10 (The year I was born)
2001 - ?/10
2002 - ?/10
2003 - ?/10
2004 - ?/10
2005 - 9/10 (can't really remember but im sure)
2006 - 9/10 (not really sure here either)
2007 - 9/10
2008 - 10/10
2009 - 10/10
2010 - 10/10
2011 - 9/10
2012 - 10/10
2013 - 9/10
2014 - 7/10
2015 - 7/10
2016 - 7/10 (A lot of anxiety here and the previous years)
2017 - 0.01/10 (Panic attacks daily and complete numbness)
2018 - 0.1/10 (numbness)
2019 - 0.1/10 (numbness)
2020 - 0.1/10 (numbness)

So I just kind of feel stuck with no pleasure. I can feel like im in a great mood but I still don't feel anything. And without im being aware of it im suddenly in a bad mood. I feel like I have no sense of what I like or don't like cause of it.",0.3709090909090911,2.7355912020202027,1.5038505050505044,98.38710909090908,89.0,4.784161616161616,19.03111111111111,6.360717304075467,-0.13542246464646454,750,22,170,8,25,235,113,198,0.113,0.7240000000000001,0.163,0.9294,0,0,0,0,0,0,74.0,0,0,0,0,8,24,1,1,7,0,15,9,0,1,2,25,23,10,0,2,8,0,4,5,0,1,8,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,5,0,0,0,7,10,0,0,5,6,18,12,17,16,5,10,0,1,1,1,1,3,0,4,12,85,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12420903834160997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489094490747514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207508734399597,0.0,0.0,0.14111442481177403,0.0,0.0,0.10356896585758253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354205306692746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274241674627835,0.0,0.0,0.13005451808441934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10683624082012436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693690132589602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192784107180916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250875213427516,0.17722967987317792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480624786579982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675552427619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5359418070707537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12916950387136758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17522750446057386,0.3030005779401057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416311102495056,0.0,0.0,0.10545513290382404,0.11195175031928396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553526379114012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15892754674811158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051415333349318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905921871339217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23381415052503715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240725872052389,0.0,0.1218695492229762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421562522256869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192761411245046,0.13848722914301392,0.0,0.11957099605195914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811509266623671,0.0,0.0,0.2396348079804541
mentalhealth,that_quiet_kid119,2020/03/12,"I need help On the outside people think my life is great, I have this big family, nice house, ect. But what I really wish they'd notice is how much I was struggling. It only hurts 10 times worse when you slowly lead up to a panic attack and nobody seems to notice and or care. When I'm home nobody ever messages me even tho I constantly check up on them to see how they are, l'm sick and tired of being that friend doesn't have a best friend and I'm either second choice, third, or not at all. I have spent countless nights crying wishing someone would understand even reaching out to some people and that only seemed to drive them away even though it shouldn't be that hard to see how much pain I'm in.
 My family doesn't make anything better and seems to only make things worse, from the moment I get home all they do is find ways to blame/yell at me mostly for my back problem telling me to stand up straight or they'll kick my ass in, knowing full well I cant stand up they'll mock me constantly and exclude me from family things even tho the expect me to continue all my cleaning tasks, when I do the dishes I won't even be done and my grandma will come in the room and start yelling at me for anything, not cleaning fast enough, cleaning too fast and half-assing things, being useless, out to get the family, or the I dont need you thing, I'll do it myself. I'm not allowed to fight back and I get in trouble when I talk about it, if I cry I'm called weak and a baby. I'm dont know what to to anymore at this point I think I'll follow through with my 30 day play I'm at 28 and shit only seems to get worse",4.621676470588233,4.369859579411767,5.130588235294121,88.55764705882355,69.38235294117646,7.858823529411764,25.235294117647058,6.961326702584282,0.8259294117647049,1267,28,283,9,20,406,170,340,0.18,0.723,0.098,-0.9851,1,0,0,0,2,0,25.0,0,2,7,3,21,21,4,2,10,0,28,8,2,7,4,58,61,29,0,9,10,0,1,0,2,6,5,1,6,0,15,17,1,0,10,1,2,4,10,12,1,2,3,4,39,9,41,47,11,47,0,2,2,1,17,23,2,11,17,185,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034524874080533,0.0,0.0,0.13333711336774628,0.0,0.0,0.0921664166474924,0.07611639020163412,0.12459128266859365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850203904293909,0.07165130706089244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272551523261189,0.0,0.08260033386410663,0.0,0.0,0.06978736891241158,0.0,0.17509716879570414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798265262551693,0.05224806261538633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290661533113533,0.18989827971573384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371029558010636,0.0,0.267548677086904,0.07328283167605502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30549545257270466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404636958188729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251841912700796,0.0,0.1693082659728664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931947705628136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725736517929127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054302740128382175,0.0,0.16252958052163252,0.0,0.0,0.09348059341942654,0.08672838218596636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890476036302551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722338877033813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815646911425836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11911089817308253,0.12014339846262195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760272200910128,0.0,0.0,0.18447254605249108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24646265639431855,0.08620582017775608,0.09505381024915444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233139362813463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658549301952147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752054695004537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051900372729039836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291171538691704,0.2950125603106769,0.0,0.0,0.08316087624418557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864386460135909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05734293255957008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469461384000848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511690014814478,0.07081080261080262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21529143465366826,0.10382245999548873,0.07959696299870922,0.0,0.04724057921617221,0.09311498478507928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433961713480999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643060466100209,0.0,0.0,0.07284233973289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18632682388821697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476840447063761,0.057550830501143575,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Themofrobro,2020/03/12,"I want to run away I'm 18, so it's not a big deal. Does anyone else have experience running away? I would love to but don't know how.",-2.057580645161288,-0.271911032258064,1.1357258064516138,100.72358870967743,94.80645161290323,4.390322580645162,14.201612903225806,5.985473137389443,-1.0717806451612906,102,2,28,1,4,36,27,31,0.0,0.86,0.14,0.4118,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,6,7,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,6,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155576190478254,0.3158708663786206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5792813053138748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31782472874999546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697792510953794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25752966690776874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015584984391001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16942347084957818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782361238699826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18183243822220688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189943593376311,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,greyuniwave,2020/03/12,new related sub - r/NutritionalPsychiatry /r/NutritionalPsychiatry,19.34571428571429,24.46445285714286,21.175,-50.517499999999984,91.85714285714285,18.54285714285714,46.35714285714285,10.125756701596842,11.693057142857144,58,3,4,3,2,21,6,7,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moonyonas,2020/03/12,"feeling hopeless and lost. i don't know what i'm doing with my life. i don't enjoy anything. everything is a temporary distraction. i don't feel ambition, passion, motivation. things that i used to enjoy only lasted about a month until i get bored of it and let go of like it's nothing. it feels like everyone's genuinely into something or someone and i'm just kind of floating by and collecting information but not really finding anything particularly interesting or find myself investing into something too deep. i'm not even sure if what i'm studying is what i really want for my future, or if i'm doing it because it suits me and it's what others expect of me. maybe i'm just spoiled and lazy because i was born into a rich family and everything was given to me and i took that for granted. now after the divorce it's been completely different, we don't have money but when i do get it i suck at controlling my spending because i am so used to not thinking about it. i never learned to be thirsty or hungry for life. i thought everything would be given to me if i wanted it. maybe i'm entitled. my parents were born and grew up extremely poor so they had something to push them out of that, they work hard and know what it's like to have nothing so they try their best to avoid going through that again. i was born into everything. i need to let go of that but it's been really hard. i was so used to that comfortable lifestyle. i still am and wish my life stayed that way. i never expected my life to reach a point where i had to pay for my parents netflix or for my dad to ask my mother for money only to not pay it back, or my dad try to scam me for money. i know if my mother weren't here i'd be a lost cause and a hopeless case. sometimes i feel like i'm just a burden or a waste of space. and yet all of these things aren't even enough to push me to do something of myself, because i'll still feel the same, just as miserable, or if not worse, if i was stuck in a job i didn't like. i mean right now i don't even like my job. it's just washing dishes on the weekends. i don't wanna do that for the rest of my life. maybe i've just gotten too used to being isolated and finding temporary solace on the internet that i forgot how to form deep connections with people in real life and i feel like i'm missing out. i've been missing out for years. i haven't had a real friend since high school. but i got used to it. i don't know how to make new friends that's for sure, and i hate working in groups at school. if there was a way to make money with little to no interaction as possible i would take it immediately. i feel like i'm just living but not really experiencing life as much as i could be at this age. i can't even believe i'm already 24 and i've achieved absolutely nothing. there's this sense of pressure coming from others to be something but why don't i feel the need to be that? why don't i feel motivated? i don't have the drive. i feel like there's so much i could do and i want to do and yet i don't have the energy to do it or even know where to begin. it's kind of like no matter what i do i still feel the same anyway so what's the point, really? i don't know.",1.8510625382574981,3.4491435073964496,3.897529075698837,87.8783727810651,77.68343195266272,7.028932870842684,23.489491940420322,7.873277556716777,1.1027980820240764,2505,80,548,40,58,856,239,676,0.139,0.753,0.10800000000000001,-0.9534,5,1,5,0,1,2,51.0,1,0,5,9,43,37,2,4,21,0,60,10,0,13,5,129,126,55,0,20,35,6,13,10,2,2,8,0,0,0,43,31,1,3,27,2,10,9,27,14,0,0,25,14,74,23,81,88,9,63,0,7,0,1,19,26,1,16,35,378,117,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061627301694212135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191277848647693,0.0,0.05220834596022545,0.0,0.0,0.04294202370228662,0.0,0.13617248599189855,0.0,0.0,0.06291916693141153,0.058606790825131774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0573690877107021,0.0,0.04810626852487521,0.058553327863313624,0.0,0.06263588725498995,0.08917675937172738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834704365814392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05770370799517385,0.0,0.18442833859478955,0.0,0.0,0.05336311807052333,0.20076265316356764,0.0,0.052646512197055705,0.0,0.31061082546497,0.19948148871668314,0.0,0.0,0.15312632904397586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862927548947437,0.0,0.05835431993856961,0.0,0.09521547764458214,0.0,0.044665040561322256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005385316538956,0.055136230751359566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059004223453216785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083680945523276,0.0,0.0,0.1163097510416724,0.18414856435310514,0.04552183434078009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11421236307132968,0.2761191064074838,0.2728346918541386,0.05597222884732712,0.04931292271589704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192471919302768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455509825055948,0.0,0.16831403541359932,0.060832519720105935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0445756373449258,0.0,0.08210627425924216,0.08281800385952177,0.08614354911045062,0.05393628526470065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607568434501114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494659502595532,0.0,0.0,0.12402045029459408,0.0,0.0,0.038716491751041165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558478847170924,0.06295782278437173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712964317528022,0.17888145848985154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04769206432505192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130379954784672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04619627735134448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047318020933597126,0.21496437968359253,0.05523298933059715,0.0,0.0,0.05952426249938522,0.13379574189288748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526813536680056,0.0,0.04198914103813788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742030236127231,0.03578377589879183,0.0,0.04433537946511549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204681182877748,0.07583135422746626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411644876095561,0.0,0.0,0.09881801583787896,0.08865569784920285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078441537618378,0.0,0.06421998968469178,0.0,0.0,0.0813129109636561,0.0,0.05691170837770821,0.07934260165023095,0.0,0.0,0.03596290664820488
mentalhealth,queertranscatdude,2020/03/12,"My trip to my Gynecologist triggered me...and not exactly how you think! Trigger warnings:
Descriptions of past sexual abuse
Mention of sexual Assault 
Descriptions of Anxiety
Descriptions of Depression
Descriptions of BDSM
Descriptions of Nudity
Read with caution 





Yesterday I had my ""yearly"" trip to see my Gynecologist. The day leading up to this was filled with anxiety. I found my head swirling with thoughts about how the visit would go. I was worried about if the interactions with the doctor would push me into a dissassociative state or if I would be able to come out fairly unscathed. Then there was having to have the conversation with my doctor about getting STI testing for EVERYTHING because 1...I like to be proactive with my sexual health and regularly get tested, and 2...roughly six months ago I was sexually assulted and I had not been tested since that had happened. Now some may be wondering why I put off testing for so long, or why I didnt go to hospital and get checked out right away. Well there are many reasons. I am a trans man who had just gotten sexually assulted, I was unemployed, struggling with my mental health to a point where I barely left home before it happened, and I had no health insurence and in my state of mind could only focus on the potential bill that could come with getting tested when I didnt even have enough money at the time to feed myself regularly. To say I was struggling would be an understatement. And if you have worked in the healthcare industry or had a potential exposure before you know that it can take up to 6 month before certain things show up. Hopefully I will have my results in the next two days.

So getting ready for the appointment I did everything I could to destress and take my mind off of it. I had to fight the urge for days before that to call and cancel my appointment. And when I went to set my alarms to get up to go I allowed only enough time for myself to wake-up, shower, and go to the appointment. I knew if I had any time that morning to think about it I would find a reason to not go. So yesterday my alarm went off and after a quick shower I made it just in time for my appointment and after a brief 3 min wait I was being taken back to the room. 

If you have ever been to a Gynecologist I am sure that you know the drill. The nurse will talk to you and give you a gown and a sheet. If you are lucky and go to a Gynecologist like mine then they are made of actual cloth but if you are unlucky you get the horrible paper gown and paper sheet. Then you strip down and put on the gown and cover yourself with the sheet. Then the doctor comes in, checks your brest for lumps, feels your abdomen, and then starts the process of the pap smear. I will not go into much detail here because it sucks for all of us who are born with a vagina. The cold speculum, the scrapping, the general vulnerability. But this is not the part that triggered me. 

Now I am not your average person with average experiences. I am heavily involved in my local bdsm community. And being involved in this community and going to parties has over time made me extremely comfortable with nudity. I will walk through a room of 50+ complete strangers in nothing but my underwear. I will stand proudly naked in front of these same people to do a scene and not even bat an eyelash. But laying back on that table with a doctor peeking under a sheet makes me feel incredibly more vulnerable than standing naked in front of strangers. 

When I was younger I was sexually abused by a family member. And I think that my discomfort with this setup starts there. The abuse was never out in the open like standing naked in front of a crowd. No. It was sneaky and quiet. It was done under covers with them peaking and me just trying to hide my shame at the time. I was so convinced that it was something I deserved. I now know that I was wrong. But the point is that the way the doctor carefully works under the sheet to perform the task does not sit well with me. It is triggering and makes me extremely uncomfortable. If the sheet had not been there I could have mentally processed it as a medical procedure instead of it relating to bad past memories. Next year I will talk to my doctor about the ability to forego the stupid sheet. Im not really sure if that would weird him oit but oh well...I ha e to take care of me.",6.2137142723597165,6.641929407628133,6.620161256397675,76.90030615345069,66.0083432657926,10.06072588749445,31.46885881885531,9.963828661940642,2.954173647432752,3459,126,655,73,51,1123,341,839,0.10400000000000001,0.835,0.061,-0.9874,6,0,1,0,4,0,73.0,1,14,2,5,36,30,4,6,57,1,76,16,3,16,7,138,129,60,0,20,31,0,2,3,0,13,12,2,5,2,33,52,1,1,15,2,4,26,15,14,2,2,41,6,89,16,120,65,8,121,0,1,1,1,35,44,1,17,46,478,122,18,0.05696777334697173,0.20249248793078103,0.055592329086544434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050498493833334525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03874003938412783,0.0,0.08716038136556163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05352309832390472,0.0876094025860593,0.04756571119923901,0.06945405175311697,0.0,0.19390151697402114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058170465966155424,0.0,0.11616488326061004,0.0,0.0,0.1472180774011046,0.05972962649705549,0.0,0.0,0.1819365260306021,0.0,0.0,0.11021850294748277,0.0,0.04906625970805074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3498535797112245,0.049852882354985,0.0582978109224002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772587662626625,0.0,0.07525335403961689,0.05153061245891091,0.0,0.0,0.1023979227620554,0.0557254135920013,0.05370414670953354,0.0,0.057609235788594226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520675127808998,0.0,0.0,0.06246222306662781,0.0,0.0,0.2083431722096004,0.05464867915416833,0.25900878732748794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075282766353287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05846537065700149,0.18166223740395485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057143321535337126,0.05658185293632456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06153497093371666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939239951865436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06189565242693997,0.0,0.0,0.08349472951185062,0.0,0.0,0.05041468674078791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16171285369211788,0.07605286214222669,0.05775638072824034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738903833335093,0.11482023314091858,0.0,0.11504242278750187,0.0,0.09094226636258487,0.0,0.04187786820603607,0.0,0.0439370587570118,0.0,0.1211717464796045,0.0,0.0,0.0546621149557629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08665311739310946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169054706578408,0.10876437139520014,0.039494281127186295,0.049742062337123895,0.0,0.0,0.10770591884901458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453669363657,0.0,0.0,0.056983189635491364,0.0,0.03649501434927566,0.11714471793987938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048650167171688526,0.0,0.04530305988450803,0.0,0.0,0.04539593971505743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04712433080134135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04385657511608968,0.0,0.0,0.0806441663730137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11911017146387465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738290438723233,0.0,0.12849802749016095,0.09157707663078887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03784685727587029,0.10950794670860996,0.0,0.0452260486754631,0.19931020056790175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03867737863974026,0.0,0.05564923681877134,0.0,0.0685252170794797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04521836685124166,0.0,0.0,0.15366260938040552,0.10561939325668243,0.10280910935064454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06177912011227697,0.08294643495900274,0.057853539115373775,0.0,0.2428096302025331,0.062285317204031576,0.0,0.07337075654726721
mentalhealth,forehand01,2020/03/12,"Anyone else feel like they are always acting? Like I know everybody does to an extent, but I mean all the time around everybody for no good reason. Hell, I'm even acting when I'm by myself; like I'm lieing to myself or trying to convince everyone including me that I'm okay and there is nothing to worry about. 

Anyone else like this?",2.9813636363636387,5.117935924242428,4.2545454545454575,84.1518181818182,76.12121212121212,6.824242424242425,20.090909090909093,7.793537801064563,0.8882909090909088,265,6,49,4,6,87,47,66,0.113,0.614,0.272,0.8741,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,5,8,1,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,1,9,9,4,0,0,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,7,8,9,2,5,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,6,28,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17299934051528856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907536428580731,0.4260605840702994,0.0,0.18508565402176505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18194508820887745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3473673959111922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732383657635053,0.0,0.0,0.19866871222056529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512649411688113,0.14853228937188304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17438662152058104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114262932465041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4063009722042272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22647698993064236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19949705729132405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21376804140437175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123508982902972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14115851954529998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21114460749910613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chillnoi,2020/03/12,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me Okay this sub probably gets like a million of these kinds of posts daily and here I am to add to it. 

I’ve been struggling since I was like 13-14 (I’m 21 now) to figure out what in the hell is wrong with me. I’ve never felt right in the head, I’ve had very vivid and compelling suicidal thoughts for as long as I can remember (which also isn’t much, my memory is horrible), and idk the usual social difficulties and whatnot like nothing too crazy and it’s not necessarily hindered me as much during my highschool and a bit of my college years but now that I’m out of my little student bubble (I’ve not graduated yet, but am a full fledged adult now so), I feel like my hands are tied with some kind of invisible rope and I’m just unable to do anything for myself. 

People generally can’t tell what I’m thinking or have a hard time figuring me out because I seem happy, loud and expressive but my mental state doesn’t seem to match my appearance. I struggle with letting people know exactly how I feel, I just don’t know how to let people know everything I’m thinking about. 

I’ve tried to subtly hint or talk to my friends about my problems but they don’t really understand, I’ve tried to be suggestive about seeing some kind of doctor to my mom but my parents don’t believe in getting help for that unless you’re like clinically insane. My boyfriend has severe clinical anxiety that he’s been diagnosed for and I assumed he would understand or acknowledge that there is something wrong with me and the way I act but he is often also similarly dismissive towards my issues and behaviours as my parents and friends are and that makes me think maybe I really am overthinking it, maybe it’s all in my head. 

I’m not at any financial capability to see a doctor since it’s very expensive where I live, I have no idea what to do. Should I just keep to myself and live my life? I mean of course I could speak up that’s the obvious better option but I don’t think I’m gonna be able to do that. I wish there were some way I could just fucking find out what the hell was wrong with me because I’m so frustrated and sad about how I’m not able to be a proper functioning adult or at least try to be one while everyone else in my life gets ahead of me in some way or the other. I read about all these successful people who were at low points who found the motivation to get out of the bad place they were in and make it in life, especially people who have been physically and mentally abused since I have too (kinda still am in it but it’s manageable I guess) and I feel like maybe mine wasn’t as bad as what people have gone through, which is why I’m not just as motivated as they are. My moms tried to be all “you gotta move out and stick it to your dad and make it in life etc etc” but I just can’t seem to do anything, ANYTHING I mean it’s been 3 weeks I’ve not even been able to commit to starting a whole Netflix show bc of I don’t know what. 

Sorry for the long ass post. Feels like something more fitted for r/offmychest but idk I just went ahead with this here. It’s so all over the place omg. 

TL/DR: I don’t feel right in the head and I feel very unheard and unseen by everyone around me.",4.459039077514415,4.718530657698062,5.473562887038224,84.19036995515697,69.77727952167413,9.002220798633354,27.73724108477472,8.976282227363876,1.8845949604954093,2546,79,554,44,42,842,277,669,0.127,0.7879999999999999,0.085,-0.9834,2,0,2,0,1,0,42.0,0,2,3,6,35,31,4,2,19,1,57,15,5,9,8,132,111,55,1,6,29,5,9,7,2,4,9,2,0,2,36,37,0,1,34,3,1,5,20,15,0,2,17,14,65,16,87,81,17,61,2,2,3,2,27,34,4,18,23,357,101,11,0.17439381007130356,0.06887604928254587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297511127151553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039531257022350295,0.0,0.0444702624558994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351124637305934,0.05174915486609457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707436465015024,0.07087256530309538,0.0,0.0,0.06549403478509044,0.0,0.05141238434847164,0.06346429099901829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282617785897196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590020154205034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189996362042943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0485612168632108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12966346476751994,0.038395155601633785,0.0,0.0,0.11109383933711717,0.05224463717143325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763575006394928,0.12458697276047015,0.0558151354233019,0.0,0.05313092766497192,0.0,0.0,0.0637379371185126,0.08982415003902591,0.053741422422167666,0.12148475723091508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403814770851221,0.0,0.0,0.06188181788687468,0.05207419979622215,0.0,0.1789783617485811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038964164942349694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562312809432766,0.0,0.060673942926714575,0.0,0.051669743767642655,0.0,0.1816043167467349,0.15973712870507442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11888632422669035,0.16423934065472975,0.19880001546821915,0.058262804196407135,0.10266195289044913,0.10288868937329457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640922241272356,0.0,0.17520202233786816,0.1266439896432983,0.0,0.0,0.11716529512666175,0.0,0.0,0.13616528174996875,0.0,0.06178434033195949,0.08546634427424935,0.0,0.04483441912145189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055778521396827686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03939125301719812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909579197879728,0.0,0.0,0.2418054193498972,0.0,0.1214696091294208,0.0,0.05495283985944063,0.0,0.1113473754311062,0.0,0.06267534108172339,0.05562377461324475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05814700117101211,0.0,0.07448076022693276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585139692308707,0.09928757395286918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264619185608276,0.1587615749154724,0.0,0.06567178871869353,0.0,0.14426036182689006,0.0,0.0,0.059257509145776474,0.0,0.08950458340238393,0.0,0.06507319751443351,0.041145612122827684,0.0,0.04642370733220371,0.0,0.0,0.1215428501614738,0.0,0.06358617431908661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04672371287173237,0.050809292240216096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899268237369692,0.0,0.04614973507299927,0.033896811030149215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578692660374285,0.0,0.0,0.1210334044081788,0.0,0.0,0.06402338120721165,0.14389315730611574,0.0,0.13842568907090974,0.046629398388912315,0.0,0.0,0.053888269704305616,0.0524544294557994,0.06490148699420277,0.06684809166167696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04129478635726768,0.2542296726853596,0.0,0.037434631986753335
mentalhealth,sexislikepizza69,2020/03/12,"I need help finding a solution for my sister in law who lives in Switzerland (We live in the US) My wife's sister (32 years of age), who lives in Geneva, Switzerland has a long history of depression (started when she was 13) and has attempted to take her own life on multiple occasions. My wife suspects that she has BPD however this has not ever been diagnosed.

She is currently on multiple meds, most of which she abuses and takes with alcohol. She has dramatic ups and downs, but is generally depressed and requires benzo to sleep.

Today my wife received a call from her sister at 3am Geneva time. She had taken a cocktail of 1600mg Lyrica, 75mg Quetiapine, 6mg Temesta, 500mg Depakine. We later found out that when her parents arrived she had cut her wrists as well with a kitchen knife.

Our fear is that she will be released from the hospital without any real solution. We can't find any real rehab options and are not sure what can possibly done to finally help her. Any suggestions would help.",6.1942982456140365,6.933060131578952,6.794473684210527,74.55048245614037,66.10526315789474,10.333333333333336,34.780701754385966,10.317481424215053,3.7553333333333327,795,36,140,19,12,261,125,190,0.10099999999999999,0.818,0.081,-0.6115,3,0,1,0,1,0,23.0,5,0,0,2,4,6,1,1,7,0,19,7,2,0,2,30,25,9,0,2,4,7,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,0,8,11,3,1,4,1,0,1,4,4,1,0,7,0,23,2,24,15,2,23,0,2,0,0,33,10,0,2,12,95,31,1,0.0,0.16121069473688945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14540842424666414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27757957119111065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17136476653772126,0.0,0.13893406112099513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343792373684328,0.13809961511869734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13923821120197705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12307546694114635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15310707770010715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490487838018974,0.2487155941755242,0.0,0.0,0.14918447313695551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735975785035661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961043007180266,0.0,0.0,0.3604345397473857,0.12041019532344267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15113371567183315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088791963612756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510802559764764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338896060110704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30973567645491196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615981788255624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630506953854208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12823640617015106,0.0,0.20460271386551346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933858739659443,0.0,0.12897044568957813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16366529887501802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12233567904882668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115848447544362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966542254820292,0.0,0.0,0.08761918101672543
mentalhealth,mxnte10,2020/03/12,"I want to get diagnosed for my anxiety, but afraid of the drug test Hi, I’m 17 and live in San Diego, CA. I am pretty certain that I suffer from anxiety and/or depression, and want to get diagnosed since I am going away for college soon and won’t have the usual support for my family and friends, and also so that I may bring my pet, which needs to be registered as an ESA. I don’t really know much about the process, but I know they do blood tests for drugs or other illnesses that may be contributing to symptoms and things. I recently stopped, but I used to smoke weed very frequently, and I don’t know how serious this would be or if they would tell my family, or get me in trouble, or if this would just overall negatively affect my diagnosis. If anyone is familiar with how this process works and have any advice/information for me I would be very appreciative!",9.719092436974787,6.707824388235295,9.637899159663867,69.21911764705884,61.0,14.184873949579833,39.57983193277311,12.540900571622839,4.715865546218488,686,26,136,19,7,227,100,170,0.135,0.7440000000000001,0.121,-0.3721,0,0,3,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,1,7,8,0,1,4,0,19,7,1,4,1,38,33,23,0,10,11,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,1,0,9,9,0,1,3,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,0,0,20,3,18,22,1,10,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,9,5,96,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467564730295092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751582817682927,0.0,0.21939876438415168,0.0,0.0,0.10026749426219668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472751557872314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235088303222095,0.29109271150064553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33259323207273833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703664955516672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107892468026382,0.0,0.22475923366544767,0.0,0.08149661436477673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23642402852189376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662341286924714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541432237327228,0.1063280953364637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14588772371423306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186468586949803,0.0,0.14158861859828722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862063690246102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198874819244698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627268030299617,0.0,0.1490458420878836,0.0,0.0,0.12533652064445885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526752398343843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385017477027785,0.15793307654174116,0.23663739296647,0.1691601812699674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104395741820756,0.0,0.0,0.4074644313726174,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vindestructible,2020/03/12,"Listening to nostalgic music is a trigger? I'm currently 27. Between 14-22ish for me was a very rough period. Suicidal, self harming, mental illness had it's grip. I made choices and changes and had been feeling relatively OK in recent years despite a few setbacks.   


For some reason, tonight I've been listening to music that I loved growing up, and relatively out of nowhere I had this abrupt weight on my chest. The feeling that I used to feel so often back when I was in the middle of my dark times. I don't know if my brain is associating hearing the songs with the feelings I had at that time or what. Honestly haven't self harmed in years but for some reason I feel like I could do it tonight? I'm not going to. But I feel like I am capable.  


I suppose I'm just wondering if anyone else gets this feeling or anything similar.",3.2958623693379785,5.228709335365856,4.735888501742164,81.97304878048784,74.54878048780488,7.856445993031357,30.61672473867597,8.634040054169528,2.556799303135889,657,31,126,13,14,219,102,164,0.044000000000000004,0.8029999999999999,0.152,0.9189,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,7,1,15,5,2,5,0,31,35,11,1,3,8,0,10,2,0,0,1,4,0,2,8,5,1,0,11,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,9,14,16,5,18,25,3,22,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,8,14,82,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448649017460412,0.1531109794314013,0.12296999341104108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149041615035908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668157896618473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807948606897376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193094767989496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248314540209202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5289019804300182,0.2135088309334425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780721729504398,0.0,0.08492578037126855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16842098439736844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212404599971093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14601007960843276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13486842242635244,0.1413963898041115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15059254170514594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072824421153708,0.1475463001730108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31178081314757633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16345460654822766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17427027084123686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290614686691796,0.0,0.12329724013287267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18196819970958605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205287983690406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19245891447933106
mentalhealth,softheartedcynic,2020/03/12,"Who were you when you felt like you? What were you like before you were told what was normal and what wasnt? What were you like before certain behaviors were expected of you? What were your interests? What did you do as a kid to calm yourself down? Who did you look up to? What did you want to be? Before this and that person hurt you, what were you like? What were you like before they were even there; before you even knew they existed? Who are you in your room, away from everything? Who are you without the things you own? If you had nothing to your name, what would you yearn for? If your house burned down with everything inside, what would you miss? What would you feel relieved to see left in ashes? Who do you want other people to think you are? Is it the same as who you want to be?",1.8407278481012668,4.089777550632913,2.1523892405063307,97.21946993670888,80.45569620253164,5.468987341772152,16.837025316455694,6.6274283507984215,-0.40079873417721545,615,11,136,6,16,186,74,158,0.028999999999999998,0.8190000000000001,0.152,0.9465,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,28,2,0,4,12,0,0,3,0,26,0,0,0,1,22,37,7,0,11,3,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,1,2,23,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,18,4,30,9,20,14,2,9,0,3,2,0,40,8,0,2,6,112,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13341302467072655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6041547639674071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18757840807878493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25523964462991144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179911698135709,0.0,0.13634160462888267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384813682129085,0.1520131966528823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542826641737587,0.0,0.0,0.3468684473641882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924365570348902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912917302581287,0.1362521662519342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844444113618568,0.12398831901686867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315506416508835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433803089833508,0.09098742320846613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356864245220691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512646136923066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13688226614053195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026167038057343,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MentalHealthnoLove,2020/03/12,"Mental Health Broke Friendship in Time of Need I (21M) have depression, anxiety, OCD, and ADHD. I grew up with a very abusive father but he is now out of my life. From these experiences, abuse towards women and children can be quite triggering for me. I have gotten over a lot of my mental health issues over the past few years after some pretty intense therapy. However, the past two months have gotten pretty bad for my mental health because I developed horrible insomnia that has seriously impeded my thinking.

I have been good friends with Amy (Fake name, 21F) for many years. We eventually dated and fell in love for a few months last year. We broke up due to me requiring to get a job and defer for a year in another city which strained the relationship. It was a mutual breakup though. We drifted apart a bit but we still remained good friends. Eventually, Amy vaguely texted me that she was not feeling safe at her apartment and wanted me to sleep with her (not sex, literally sleep with her). I was still semi in love with her but I pushed those feelings aside because I felt she was really upset needed a close friend for support. When I got there, I asked why she did not feel safe. She told me that her friend just killed herself, she was recently raped a few months ago, and her grandmother just had a heart attack. She was seriously struggling. This was very triggering for me because I care about her deeply and it hurts to see her in pain, I have been suicidal in my past, violence against women and children remind of my father which trigger me, and my grandfather died a few months ago as well and I didn't cope with that well. I had a complete mental breakdown in front of her, even though she called me over to comfort her. I hadn't had a breakdown like that in 4 years. I felt so terrible that I did that to her in her time of need. I apologized profusely the next few days. I brought my mental health back under control and even fixed my insomnia. However, a few weeks later she told me that the scene was too much for her and that she needed a break from me. I am genuinely worried about her mental health right now, not to mention our friendship and any prospect of reuniting having ended. I am definitely going to give her some space right now but what else can I do for her if she doesn't want to see or hear from me?",5.666261182047558,6.41581070066519,5.807323189846318,81.12627494456764,67.27050997782705,9.236210719473963,30.407599969416623,9.314750747691287,2.515115238168056,1850,67,358,34,29,586,216,451,0.198,0.659,0.14300000000000002,-0.9852,3,0,0,0,1,0,47.0,5,0,0,3,21,32,3,3,20,0,32,16,3,4,0,60,61,24,3,7,12,2,5,1,4,0,9,1,0,4,17,25,0,4,6,0,0,7,7,16,2,1,25,8,74,16,57,35,11,65,0,4,2,4,55,24,0,5,34,252,91,2,0.0,0.1615369926554624,0.0,0.0,0.08192526025826928,0.0,0.12085448073889656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04635690085159134,0.07148059014949595,0.05214869707651428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372832240782178,0.07755148185963573,0.0,0.05241734977446945,0.05691782953896427,0.12466460961496866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442231962911453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960763505028236,0.0,0.06950230383548715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147334947111647,0.0,0.07645674161612029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04396302717958045,0.0,0.058713407952198635,0.0,0.07074811502491704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05694601398806338,0.0,0.06037703570675189,0.0,0.0,0.09004927014590229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668184942157572,0.0,0.0,0.10340408814924858,0.0,0.1309048532088554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21066717990188635,0.0,0.03561521483334777,0.06539341315843224,0.03874171549871535,0.11435296582619953,0.05452055706608504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3622995081097616,0.07683082608145082,0.08077997153772737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297576278282615,0.0,0.0,0.07115017756552977,0.06764669324133174,0.0,0.07541831800249252,0.0,0.0,0.055566405755792685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048149410138649436,0.03330367374550736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057954400036033936,0.1230494210017292,0.0,0.0,0.06911213456491111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41218673868857225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21764570671637534,0.0,0.05011167296589287,0.2021842429236401,0.0,0.0,0.07249794691575079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253606403382029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19522356950747047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870369293119506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725055645847507,0.0,0.0,0.0436704708787653,0.0,0.06730814552661679,0.07318743121295886,0.0,0.116431011007971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086428981431513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13643541166521975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887886498248836,0.0,0.0,0.07126449142471866,0.0,0.07456524786892929,0.07735677802251165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795659253279287,0.0,0.0,0.04367960649787268,0.1339503618912679,0.0,0.07949917237498111,0.0,0.0,0.1302757990331968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659069517444652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249226272922362,0.08041506592088167,0.0,0.05468063908673666,0.0,0.12258329213371533,0.0,0.061511446097817876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922839571980012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194913157510517
mentalhealth,daisycaulfield,2020/03/12,"Good Psychiatrist is Sydney area?? Hey everyone,

I recently went to my gp who gave me a referral to see a psychiatrist as he suspects I have add/adhd.

However, I researched the psychiatrist that my gp referred me to and noticed that he had really bad reviews and not a great reputation. He was described as someone who would over-medicate, mis-diagnose and is money hungry. After reading this, I called my gp and told him I wanted a new psychiatrist recommendation (which he gave me) but he was saying that most psychiatrists will have bad reviews due to the nature of their work. Is this true? 

So my question...has anyone had a good experience with psychiatrists who they would recommend (who has interest and expertise in add/adhd) and if so were they located within Sydney?

I must say that I am a bit concerned to see a psychiatrist now as from what I have read they all seem to just want to over-medicate their patients to get money. 

Any responses will be helpful! Thanks so much",7.907472527472527,7.837496450549453,8.689318681318685,65.18068131868135,62.51648351648353,12.334945054945054,37.43076923076923,11.792908689023552,4.7179850549450535,782,35,133,23,10,265,106,182,0.061,0.792,0.147,0.9534,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,5,1,5,8,0,0,9,0,19,0,0,0,3,22,30,14,0,6,4,0,0,0,0,5,0,2,0,0,12,7,0,0,3,2,2,1,1,2,0,0,9,4,21,6,17,15,4,9,0,0,2,0,23,3,0,3,5,95,33,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508743742302035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927004519898316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207121114069677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437710635165138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593701670663292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490598584180083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816459629181414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13948823390676632,0.0,0.14279449411908596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626747951932084,0.0,0.0,0.2448788395614872,0.0,0.16094125937497025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784597572449574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32429729727128304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731062579542737,0.0,0.0,0.14098646119444902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619691953126606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16352876764646834,0.0,0.2920350056750366,0.0,0.09351724421515316,0.0,0.14413566321178298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321751280526532,0.0,0.0,0.2326511309232383,0.13289288784661474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368668493599012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13439692882494647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13948823390676632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17220321207842565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532306767318086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627372194732858,0.0,0.0,0.20739716451974302,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i_just_dont_fit_in,2020/03/12,Just no joy anymore Im finding as I age that I just dont fit in anywhere anymore.  I have to be overly responsible to take care of the ones I love so joy just isnt there anymore. I am not the fun person I once could be.  Im just tired and want the day to end .  It seems like the ones I support provide little love in return.  Most coworkers I am old enough to be there parent and my life experiences and opinions seem to be so different from them that I cannot relate to anyone anymore.  The new generation sees me and a white male so I need to just die.  It sometime feels like what I am still doing trying and just give up.  I cant really find anything that  make me happy with the exceptions that a few of my little ones still say they love me but I know that age will soon fade away.. All this makes me have anxiety and antisocial tendancies and affects how I communicate making things worste. I know this is not normal but do many other secretly feel this burden that they would be easily forgotten if not just for the finacial and other things you provide. I feel like that is the only value I have.,3.8002232142857153,4.84399214732143,5.146785714285713,83.09821428571429,71.72321428571428,8.278571428571428,25.607142857142854,8.660442795831766,1.6685232142857152,867,26,178,15,16,290,124,224,0.08,0.768,0.151,0.9229,2,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,3,0,16,14,0,0,10,0,22,5,0,5,1,46,42,16,1,6,14,1,3,3,0,2,2,1,0,2,17,9,0,0,10,0,0,0,8,2,0,3,0,6,27,12,19,34,5,19,0,0,2,3,13,8,0,5,14,134,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172524329767207,0.0,0.4237896528844408,0.07469855526695833,0.0,0.0879126175416769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003710209623898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892108545626553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529567345639846,0.0,0.0,0.0688970059421001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087346832039983,0.11161541231311213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520486168339395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946203492962964,0.11038473855869113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450098800208166,0.0,0.0,0.1620505350224204,0.15263984062259026,0.0,0.0,0.19528276876516704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024818049163672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372333652229592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307911182619121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742278984784316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545772912498525,0.1565763475680576,0.2141449852191884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892568107957467,0.0,0.21393109683593936,0.1083096285963114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921365906633399,0.0,0.10317781914931563,0.0,0.0,0.10467146799736653,0.0,0.0,0.11210091765876247,0.11377127881608197,0.21717387477686967,0.08124961123967403,0.0,0.0,0.11862292266248207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932805038926926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06843852402015861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495611270129898,0.0,0.0,0.08513028878061786,0.1945094334917339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565835886288047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063037486080598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212302868341644,0.0,0.0,0.08032344050033165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14194722741976795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227862496502777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253107730659572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301155345779615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758895107785762,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Internal-Midnight,2020/03/12,Today is my birthday and I haven't got a single birthday wish... Being lonely sucks...,0.665416666666669,2.905966375000002,2.715,85.09666666666669,104.0,2.1333333333333333,17.833333333333332,3.1291,-0.4057666666666666,66,2,10,0,3,22,15,16,0.172,0.828,0.0,-0.3612,0,2,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,8,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4728823114843506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5604425924779675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6799164801810532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,P0G0G0,2020/03/12,Stuck in my room I am 18 and living in a rented room away from home or people I know for the first time. I have a problem and I dont know how to fix it. I spend all day in my room exept for when its dinner time or when I go to TAFE two days a week. At those times I can do outside and interact with people just fine but during the day I cant bring myself to leave my room. It feels like I am afraid that the people who own the house will want to talk to me or even just look at me as I walk past. Pathetic I know but its something that I cant handle. I havent eaten breakfast or lunch for days because I am too scared to simply walk past the lovely people who are providing me with accomodation. Someone please tell me what to do. I have only been here a week and I have noticable lost weight and begun a downward spiral back into the depression that I have been afflicted with in the past.,2.075148342059336,3.27085696858639,3.7707643979057615,90.70752530541014,76.17277486910993,6.5593019197207685,20.063176265270506,7.0316486544052195,0.1917096684118671,695,14,159,7,15,233,103,191,0.13,0.7959999999999999,0.075,-0.8898,1,0,1,1,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,9,8,0,2,12,0,18,6,0,1,1,25,30,15,0,2,8,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,6,0,11,9,5,0,4,0,2,4,4,5,0,2,5,3,25,3,23,24,2,34,0,2,1,1,6,13,0,4,18,113,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126917718269703,0.10387277477758013,0.0,0.08234715523890458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34847710846986746,0.0,0.11634935048954675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583197541358532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922301105450588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830352676242718,0.09650544600980722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490405951455122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677247143950776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550224502563646,0.0,0.0,0.15587107570212538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227191536579384,0.0,0.0,0.14303654039467384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599618288824692,0.0,0.11928338893399268,0.0,0.11343819493919027,0.0,0.14746229689080403,0.0,0.12192036462371512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15379627545633548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273896957473287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3868645392026593,0.3746064187114491,0.0,0.0,0.14828383265498726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292590322774912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524462478140925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445790644223025,0.10399578161886687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857698802722766,0.11807109444368333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23630915133940544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13195936673446185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967720675561897,0.0,0.21671563835213875,0.16449832258272795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,takedownhisshield,2020/03/12,"Was wondering if I could talk with someone via PM I'm not having a crisis or anything, I've just been having a really rough time lately and I tend to get better conversations in PM's than in comments. 

Thanks :)",2.5478571428571435,4.7607673571428615,4.519285714285715,81.36321428571429,77.80952380952381,7.057142857142857,22.404761904761905,8.07648339933343,1.3932190476190478,167,5,31,3,4,57,35,42,0.0,0.726,0.27399999999999997,0.9021,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,10,3,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,2,2,5,7,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,2,19,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29502285030743103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31707260347021776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28624074001742617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18730646684303556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4044144395881772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296704272022025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037640170738701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28815643296410376,0.0,0.3300674684860729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20904982834134803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38878836359861424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-HeComethInPeace,2020/03/12,"Linked together, we are unbreakable. My brother is organizing a mental health movement called chain of support. It is all about finding strength by supporting others and recognizing those that support you. You can contribute by going to this link and adding the people in your support network to be added to the chain, or by coming to the kickoff event at the Provo, Utah mall next monday.[Help us add to the chain.](https://chainofsupport.com)",9.420000000000002,11.571924972602744,7.561534246575345,66.85435616438359,59.54794520547945,9.675616438356164,37.88767123287671,9.888512548439397,4.157489863013699,365,17,51,7,5,108,57,73,0.0,0.825,0.175,0.9217,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,2,3,0,1,1,5,0,0,6,0,5,1,0,0,1,10,11,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,5,12,10,1,7,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,2,38,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18896427702600171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15941054794279533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691390939675346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517237447693024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967073427142945,0.0,0.0,0.12404006188462408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864943144520648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19681062450847805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282954873389278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8400036933606764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22260124426384265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cobfort,2020/03/12,I find it incredibly depressing that American Indians were all killed and their languages and cultures destroyed to put strip malls and highways down. I am white and would move to Europe if it meant they could revive and have their identity back that my ancestors destroyed.,12.968085106382981,11.213488893617024,10.396276595744684,62.38250000000002,53.680851063829785,14.506382978723408,46.90425531914894,13.023866798666859,6.194412765957448,226,11,34,6,2,67,37,47,0.245,0.7120000000000001,0.043,-0.9079999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,3,0,1,4,3,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,11,6,6,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,1,6,0,3,2,1,4,0,1,1,0,4,1,0,1,1,26,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976272158451238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090379577113929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3333764148088065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35376816660145777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4282273733292961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4113862445945562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3891047790866072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27495813647237954,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ContraryHook31,2020/03/12,Hey I’m really scared right now. I need help and I don’t know what to do. I’m terrified of doing anything. I’m 21 and I have ADHD and anxiety. Everything that’s been happening now around me and out in the world is so scary and overwhelming.  I need someone to talk to. I need help. What should I do?,-1.15625,0.8906433750000033,1.6559999999999988,94.589,99.625,6.3100000000000005,17.3375,7.554174236665415,0.6686737500000004,232,7,54,6,10,80,41,64,0.19899999999999998,0.7190000000000001,0.083,-0.8229,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,1,0,8,0,0,0,0,12,16,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,7,0,7,14,0,7,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,34,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038673672458509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934237039465776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080677086101056,0.22508329516227568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272383987628816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22358765306494785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3389497919787908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389555419087836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5624381912439589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16197728234836553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21592598344656305,0.0,0.0,0.25313929877284697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21423250071951866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20322510160018076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,riga123495,2020/03/12,"What is wrong with me please help me you are my final hope. I am going to begin from the start.
As a kid i never really had a healthy diet was really eating shit and eating vast amounts of food.At summers when we ate at the restaurants i would get anxious because i would get a feeling like i am nauseated and wanted to puke and also wanted to go to the bathroom.This made me so anxious about where i was and if i was close to home because i would need a close bathroom due to the stress and bad dieting.When i was at school when i started middle school i would have a bloated stomach pain in my abdomen and abdominal sounds that made me really embarassed.After sometime i noticed a smell arround me a bad smell that i couldnt control.It wasnt because of my hygiene or something else there was a bad smell.I thought i had flatuence problems because of my diet but no.After 1 year of middle school i hadlost weight and began a healthier diet.But that peoblem still existed.I smelled and my bowels were growling like hell.Imagine being every day in a classroom for 4 years smelling bad i went crazy trying to find everything that i can.Searching seaeching searching its all i did.I am now into highschool and have developed more serious problems of feeling like shit.I have done numerous health checks even for food intolerances and others.Done ultra sounds.I have been told by my doctor that i may suffer from colitis but when he was touching at my abdomen he didnt find anything.i am taking probiotics and other pills but even though i take them i sometimes feel the pain,the smell is still here and my breath is smelling too and this happened before the pills too.I am starting to believe its a mental issue due to traumatic embbarassing events but i dont know how to get rid of them. I am in the verge of going insane pls help me i have tried 4-5 years getting back to who i was but i cant",4.548335303388495,5.812912111702127,5.1873877068557945,82.6751851851852,70.17021276595744,7.378881008668243,30.68124507486209,7.662118739084242,2.0315531126871558,1518,63,284,17,27,489,191,376,0.142,0.797,0.061,-0.9818,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,1,1,2,0,18,16,1,1,18,0,38,18,6,3,2,49,67,28,0,12,7,0,5,3,0,5,5,1,1,1,11,18,7,0,7,0,1,4,6,12,0,0,21,12,44,4,33,39,3,40,0,1,0,0,11,14,1,4,25,184,55,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764601840128677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911236229720404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650439366147232,0.2825140693078838,0.2062593651601635,0.0,0.07197924884356982,0.09530315418087756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487407274202528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05455308911197098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865807146701241,0.0,0.08656420444572463,0.09913800873155898,0.0,0.0,0.17311190682338012,0.07066349100512541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174084620403604,0.0,0.07127011854585337,0.0,0.07602339247858622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831264808734885,0.1208612001879888,0.0,0.09266342394113476,0.1546261429042565,0.0,0.20457139156932025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767776345890978,0.0,0.1442221152778371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480202287492546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991445138843915,0.0,0.0,0.1133968255647992,0.0,0.08484994701905772,0.08401624362907154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882892336146436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04648805728748893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12397815151627213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16008084817157664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524610082998144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272188091254062,0.06524046918414195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630545842048258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18001792046324666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928536301533458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16188103803600853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625701805983156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568266087293859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365936516247607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512096208366794,0.16732192604466115,0.0,0.17961818792546466,0.0,0.13510622004116113,0.0,0.09689673694443167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720122587263544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310854026254565,0.06715444133959425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082868412087167,0.0,0.11486114003326055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978590052971743,0.0,0.0,0.10300695721482403,0.0,0.07841511204833093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24035919631379876,0.09248510102023257,0.0,0.1634181730738382
mentalhealth,Wellbla,2020/03/12,"Depressed freak out after positive experience? I just told a girl I really care about how I felt and she was happy and said it’s mutual. We talked and all was well but minutes after goodnights were exchanged I seriously lost it. I got in my car and cried and yelled at myself to the point I became nauseous and had a headache. I don’t understand. She makes me happy, and I should be happy? Why would such an negative reaction come out of something I am happy I did and have no regrets about?",2.3085567010309305,4.728981969072169,4.007432989690724,83.60805670103095,79.82474226804123,7.178969072164946,24.13298969072165,8.238735603445708,1.7200358762886598,389,14,74,8,10,130,71,97,0.209,0.588,0.204,0.3688,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,1,6,11,0,0,4,0,11,0,0,2,1,22,20,10,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,2,12,0,0,2,0,1,2,3,5,1,0,10,3,16,6,10,7,1,9,0,3,0,0,7,5,0,0,2,59,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759221648802208,0.0,0.0,0.1486331161876939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18953369857147312,0.0,0.0,0.14861363241850525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878311453139005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656712360524009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800081292620464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7347137783138329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883543611847438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517580681746595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16311175875607314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053739738636363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16413077570250653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328343544467829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13868595329405448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16487511443986594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796264898388279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551395920727509,0.0,0.15569594337556222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12257174055824653,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jung03,2020/03/12,Do child & adolescence psychiatrists test for pba disorder? Recently I feel like I’m going crazy with symptoms of this disorder and I have no idea if I have it. I’m meeting with a child and adolescence psychiatrist but I have no clue if they diagnose such a disorder.,3.80294117647059,6.431963019607848,5.509568627450981,73.7290588235294,75.66666666666667,11.138823529411766,31.768627450980397,10.793553405168565,4.542008627450982,218,11,39,9,5,74,34,51,0.261,0.705,0.034,-0.8625,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,9,8,5,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,4,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,25,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25067119526346426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348187214687904,0.0,0.0,0.7954527485501646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11697917584243026,0.16527883805764754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131483407403208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26116970629002983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302753238300114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228433465217203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24046465401960745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hellokittydoll,2020/03/12,"Helpful Mental Health Website. **The Mighty!**  [https://themighty.com/](https://themighty.com/) 

Apologies if you have already heard of it, I know that it's definitely worth sharing... spreading positivity and good vibes to you today. :)",9.527177419354839,12.791237967741935,4.953508064516129,66.45026209677421,104.80645161290323,5.420967741935487,32.90725806451613,6.6274283507984215,3.3012870967741943,191,9,20,3,8,50,29,31,0.0,0.5870000000000001,0.413,0.9422,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,2,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,1,12,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4615473476055513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508067909764212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.444578334786668,0.0,0.0,0.2803429877022789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298583017211893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42149586600182937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3964504393752107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,basedgwd,2020/03/12,Bipolar and ptsd; struggling Bipolar 2 and PTSD diagnoses here. Struggling with substance abuse. Still working but going through hypo mania and depression on the regular. Any words of encouragement? I have no one in real and the depression and drug use is getting to me.,4.827028985507244,8.333189239130434,4.843478260869572,73.99246376811597,80.52173913043478,7.41449275362319,35.92753623188405,8.344100000000001,4.042953623188407,219,13,30,5,6,68,37,46,0.322,0.617,0.062,-0.9393,0,0,1,0,1,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,2,2,0,2,4,0,1,0,10,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,6,5,0,4,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,22,2,1,0.0,0.25666272402213824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731100603278785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3731539871805283,0.21986769215667265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512138005303491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317652886181295,0.0,0.12311179092456295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678928898149535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5064411753283548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465642945572089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17299533447702262,0.0,0.0,0.4529225954857986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18709264110091725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15770405728665973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wormfro,2020/03/12,"(tw abuse) i dont know why i cant handle yelling i just had a huge argument with my mom over something, and it involved the topic of the past abuse ive taken from her. she starts to scream (mind you we are outside with neighbors in earshot) and i immediately start fidgeting with my hands (in a way that looks like im trying to frantically rub sand off of them). my hands keep fidgeting and im rocking back and forth and shaking. 
i plug my ears and start to whisper ""please stop please dont yell you know it hurts me please be quieter please its hurting you know it makes my brain think bad thoughts"" repeatedly. 
i have never been to a psychiatrist or psychologist or even a therapist. im 18, ive been having these reactions to yelling since i was 10.
ive convinced myself out of paranoia that i do this for attention, that theres nothing wrong with me and im selfish for thinking i could ever have something wrong with me.
i panic when i hear any sudden loud yelling from people im with.
i was hoping someone has some sort of advice, im sorry its so long but i have nobody that i feel fully safe talking to. id talk to my s/o or friends but i feel like they wouldnt understand, and im scared.",0.762802721088434,3.183690865306122,2.4292857142857147,92.19154761904764,87.2857142857143,5.225850340136055,22.452380952380953,6.742157984588678,0.6216911564625853,942,35,200,12,30,308,141,245,0.11599999999999999,0.762,0.121,0.5095,0,0,2,0,5,0,24.0,1,3,2,0,7,17,0,4,6,0,21,4,4,1,2,44,39,15,0,3,6,1,6,2,2,1,0,9,1,0,11,16,0,3,10,1,0,1,5,11,0,0,7,16,36,6,26,29,1,20,0,2,1,0,15,6,0,6,14,119,47,0,0.0,0.19980427968303927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239382950879574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057338613470077335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648347517334299,0.0704013721266354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412592343406066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732045390247747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19763835087442408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05569074074525002,0.07626976938150486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526665836437218,0.060236251956949385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514328922621909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503165566167952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374604276385701,0.0,0.0,0.18052669518544331,0.0,0.6375396046433784,0.0,0.0,0.07494503562878753,0.0,0.0,0.13901564740724318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238628730339971,0.0,0.0,0.07461810267104227,0.0708052444128822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056282411362917485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513637463642314,0.0987513305470073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503065224328486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090466428873988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892811209293326,0.0,0.0,0.08049034474265958,0.058454956572865875,0.0,0.0,0.3702200310660281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441626489481392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974809091085296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144172247251701,0.1298230589684514,0.0,0.09438624522950384,0.17904052594381267,0.0,0.0,0.07049298677444275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13554200468375885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789881252746996,0.0,0.1080541635656226,0.0,0.06693846895890718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057245870141487486,0.0,0.0,0.08777721877658007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692709919375514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608319294423242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843753276867521,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alchiemilla,2020/03/12,"Can I have some support... Please..? I’m struggling. 
I’m really struggling to stay happy.
Every time I think I’m pulling myself out of this mental state I just fall back in deeper.
I have autism.
I used to have anxiety that was so bad I was unable to talk to any of my peers, I have recently worked my way out of that though.
I hardly have any friends, or at least not a lot of them actually care about me.
I used to have an upbeat hyper bubbly personality until people hurt me so much that I’m left dry and sarcastic and hardly ever smile meaningfully.
My dad owns a restaurant, he’s a wonderful person and I care for him so much but he’s a perfectionist and works himself in to the ground. He gets really angry with me sometimes when I dont know why. He’s shouted at me for long periods of time about how he wants to kill himself. I never know how to respond. I don’t know how to help him but I really want to be better support to him rather than just sitting in front of him sobbing like I do.
I have no one to talk to. Every time I open up a little bit to anyone about my problems they either don’t know what to say, or just make it obvious they don’t care and leave.
I don’t talk to anyone about my problems anymore, not my mom, not my dad, not any of my friends.
The last time I opened up to someone to request some help and support was my bf, he seemed really understanding and caring, until I started up a few arguments over a span of a week over little things and he just left. 
One time I fractured my arm. I told my dad after I had realized it was serious and hurt a lot. He yelled at me until I cried as he took me to the er. I haven’t told my parents about any of my medical problems since. 
I know my parents don’t have the money to take me to the er and shit like that. The other day my father was telling me about how the restaurant we opened just a year ago is driving us towards being bankrupt. He is now speaking of getting a second job or selling the restaurant if he can. 
This restaurant has ruined everything for me. I spend my weekends working and I hate being there so much. I have so many tasks I have to get done in a short amount of time it is unreal, and all throughout that time my father is constantly frustrated and throwing things and yelling. I’ve lost my family because of this restaurant.
I’ve heard my mother crying at night as she speaks to my father of divorce. 
This restaurant has broken everything... it’s torn my family apart... I’ve lost so many of my good friends because I have to work. I hate this.
I hate hurting so much.
It feels like everything inside me is just crumbling and I don’t know what to do.
I feel so defeated.
I try so hard to only look at the positives in my life and that has worked for me for a long time but I feel like I’ve lost everything. 
I don’t expect anyone to read this or respond, this is just something I feel I needed to type out.
Thank you if you do.",2.501337156350143,3.9713669272727294,4.067950750548157,87.88864226682409,75.59504132231405,6.922246584584247,24.57834373418789,7.5991,1.1139205599595203,2281,74,485,30,49,761,242,605,0.177,0.708,0.115,-0.9927,3,0,1,0,2,0,59.0,2,2,3,10,33,40,6,2,23,0,44,4,2,7,4,84,92,45,1,10,22,10,7,4,4,0,2,7,0,2,23,24,0,0,16,2,3,6,15,22,2,3,14,15,89,18,80,75,15,70,0,9,1,0,57,30,2,12,34,333,112,8,0.0,0.0,0.05756343229796386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228898804363776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16045448506660587,0.0,0.045125386849600366,0.0,0.05849989323253867,0.123736598418561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045357857795243164,0.049252219529413686,0.07191664158711253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052169778284664736,0.0643992305038981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405673409568115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374468833193278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295903160300851,0.03804215099846687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036484074856518,0.06913308044045671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053357701868063837,0.09939926979515576,0.0,0.2120571665630172,0.0,0.11121660358649713,0.0,0.11930370245476295,0.0842815705261037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367211242445639,0.0,0.09245582941765816,0.0,0.0,0.04947603784553945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279344480754906,0.1585240302787671,0.17471426110172197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790763498658828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894424814519152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585361355650457,0.0,0.0652610892735297,0.0,0.1945084016774356,0.048082803524179804,0.0,0.062459398746566475,0.1281804974376881,0.0,0.041664718025431785,0.11527353475956505,0.11824223348862263,0.0,0.1044044189085365,0.04953476525122566,0.0,0.1931759474084063,0.10029837245695312,0.0,0.0,0.039374710980134696,0.11960842679031368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05942384636564329,0.05944567196091308,0.0,0.0,0.06908561671460342,0.0,0.0,0.17345082466384235,0.04373859122230959,0.04549490817687414,0.0,0.0,0.05535590875372015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994310951748138,0.04486276198916335,0.0,0.0,0.13099759776492972,0.0,0.0,0.040894605697889365,0.10301147243701894,0.0,0.06475072038173997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16932962898162535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900360773872613,0.0,0.15115598300890196,0.0,0.05824318296124153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04690934277088369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370013644524157,0.0,0.0,0.06054996975743328,0.04879518937670185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04998004005442696,0.045411570876720715,0.05834028906117916,0.0,0.04175175862853258,0.06287298084813067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333338796411634,0.0,0.0,0.2008154410022605,0.0,0.0,0.044351367819930015,0.1422361035407071,0.051557801579603435,0.05430789813260042,0.0,0.0,0.07837754029332683,0.03779690099951722,0.05795506156288674,0.0,0.2751693605982516,0.0,0.0,0.11273044501741457,0.06553744385894046,0.04004873879857429,0.0,0.0,0.0614082185939365,0.07095487379053965,0.1018927716131315,0.0,0.0,0.06958488249268557,0.04682164682853618,0.04731633061420492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0532271745307411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06396958458917275,0.2147185399305244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03798610929382031
mentalhealth,Ladyshalltear1,2020/03/12,"What's wrong with her? So, my gf has a 12 year old sister who lies a lot, is sexual with boys (having sex and sex talk), she steals and neglects her hygiene. However, she gets good grades. She has had no trauma, her mother treats her like a princess but she's tired and stressed out due to the child's behavior. What do you think could be wrong with her? 
The mother has 3 older children who she would beat when they misbehaved(all adults now) and it's more of a Caribbean thing to have beating as a normal thing, but since having the last child she did not have to witness any of that and she was not beaten harshly when done wrong only a mild slap here and there.",5.332951127819547,5.452610518796995,5.000516917293236,88.82227913533838,67.87218045112782,8.15375939849624,25.64755639097744,7.645422480735847,1.0486849624060142,521,12,112,5,8,159,88,133,0.213,0.728,0.059000000000000004,-0.9709,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,3,6,11,1,1,9,0,16,3,0,0,0,20,18,12,0,3,4,3,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,5,8,10,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,4,0,15,3,10,11,2,9,0,1,0,2,26,1,0,1,9,77,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135448652565692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15902834441505825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038294246082725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040628853826626,0.0,0.0,0.16706202154924304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235759184238618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730887206540974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16933499114327485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195153277869644,0.0,0.0,0.20900501303615007,0.0,0.0,0.1514847194027659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476305165339536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22815904407908075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600926564962078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264651554482569,0.12762595721567532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22892713320095026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14149115387142022,0.6533134006081543,0.0,0.12826484265429594
mentalhealth,Brandonlp3,2020/03/12,"Depression? Alright I thought I was being philosophical with the title.


I dont know if this is the right sub for this but I was looking for help with how to cope with the situation.

First block for background

Anyways, at the end of middle school my parents were just taking off in their individual lives (divorced). My dad got married and my mom was starting a business with her boyfriend. Behind all of this the process for me applying for a highschool got postponed till it was too late. I managed to get waitlisted at my 3rd choice where my brother went. I had a great freshman year where I in record time met some of my favorite people, but ended up deciding I was gonna try and switch schools to my first choice. Previously I hadn't made any decisions for myself and knew that I had to start. 

Starting my sophomore year at a new school drastically different in size and layout I was already regretting a lot of these things blaming myself and my parents but never outright to anyone except myself. I kept in contact with some of the people I went to school with before and after a while it became one sided. It started feeling like no one was interested in talking to me and I began to think about if I was delusional about how close we were before. My best friend stopped talking to me and takes the first excuse to hang up and my other friends wont answer any messages. At my new school I have friends but feel distanced from them. They all seem close from things that happened in their freshman year which I was lucky enough to miss out on. It feels like people I knew dont want to know me and people I met dont care for me existing. I'm in a space where all I think about is what I can do. As a socially anxious kid I have tried my best to be social but it just seems like not a lot of people are interested. 

I can't enjoy things that I used to and suddenly I get a call from one of my favorite people I went to school with previously. She talked to me for a bit and mentioned a common acquaintance of ours and how he asked her to get phone numbers for an in home presentation. After she asked I didnt want to be rude and decline so I agreed and as I was going to put something up she hung up. I thought maybe she wanted to talk but all I can think about now is that people only talk to me for a temporary benefit of their own.",4.0910708898944215,5.317821068376073,4.8055857214680735,85.12536199095022,71.22222222222223,7.471694318753142,28.08094519859226,7.827709963407826,1.6280186525892413,1852,67,373,23,34,596,217,468,0.08,0.77,0.15,0.9911,3,0,1,0,1,0,26.0,2,0,5,5,16,20,1,0,21,1,33,0,0,5,5,77,79,31,0,6,12,5,3,3,3,2,0,0,1,1,19,26,0,3,17,0,0,6,10,4,0,6,30,4,68,16,80,44,13,61,0,3,1,0,42,28,0,9,30,278,87,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527610260502292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277603550127753,0.0,0.0,0.07706266712127517,0.0,0.04769697792252379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754219961928215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609057649734725,0.0,0.14317325854680632,0.0,0.07447227533720181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965435891906993,0.0,0.06954895700108456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05875281911115051,0.0,0.0,0.07126935504824626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398397198779715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208351271394197,0.07048353772306952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034734977627672,0.09746452367457807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740689757714246,0.0,0.0,0.15810644210316493,0.0,0.10691736424559334,0.0,0.0387677207326277,0.0,0.1091143075786287,0.07520643293484416,0.0,0.0,0.060321621149382214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04572256262841885,0.0,0.0684244377613545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497751723521097,0.0,0.07694862626724157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997808614173424,0.0,0.06023441766985652,0.0,0.0572827757053656,0.0,0.0,0.1159866034274323,0.0,0.06454595681739607,0.0,0.0,0.06853036587867514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989168549923763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05261102192803067,0.13176346301401368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386711894702899,0.0518799982096384,0.0,0.0,0.15148766674582148,0.0,0.0,0.3310381223590273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857414527680533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0582545824477519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4142186747745777,0.0,0.12419935193956284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667565619586153,0.0,0.13907164067961572,0.0,0.0525146493733538,0.0,0.0,0.1931295414598632,0.0,0.0,0.057030153397324264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257722802036932,0.2741400837373129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595551643953147,0.13112677881882248,0.0,0.10830896313482756,0.03977626795089257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262597330365828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05891519574899605,0.0,0.0,0.1207035663567852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897058327931144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178318909325434
mentalhealth,meatballer,2020/03/12,"Depression is okay sometimes but I need to know where to draw the line. I’m 34 and I’ve had depression since I was a young child. I’ve had multiple genuine suicide attempts. Until I was truly an adult, I did not understand that I was depressed, even when I was explicitly told so by the people who knew me best. As an adult I’ve seen the depressive tendencies in myself, and mostly I’ve just tried to bear with it until it passes. Sometimes it takes a few weeks.

I can’t be constantly vigilant, and understanding that I’m having depressive thoughts is only partially helpful. It lets me understand that I’m being irrational, but it doesn’t change my mind. So depression comes and goes and affects my life and that of my wife, and I suppose that of my daughter although she’s probably too young to tell anything is wrong with Daddy. 

This bout has taken its toll. I’ve been in it for a while. I don’t think anything negative about people who treat with meds and therapy, but I’ve always hated those options. Altering my brain chemistry makes me feel like I’m not being myself, and is self-alienating. It gives me identity issues. As to therapy, I’m a private person and I don’t like sharing. 

I’m strongly considering talking to someone. I guess to my primary care physician. I’ve been stuck in a dark place for months now. I’d have to pass my own mental hurdles about treatment, and just asking for someone’s help feels awful, like giving up. But it’s rough, and I know I’m being unkind to my wife, who has enough to deal with. I don’t think I’ve neglected my daughter but I would hate for that to happen. 

So often I feel like the people on the internet don’t even have the same depression as me. They can say they are sad, talk to other people, etc. I mean, I don’t feel SAD... I feel like I’m worthless and my life is a never ending problem. I can’t even put myself in the mindset of someone who goes to a therapist.

I don’t know what I expect from posting this. It’s another useless act, I suppose.",2.88016743854649,4.813583735660846,4.415442821517637,83.8124837905237,75.73316708229426,7.475625222657642,26.91848949055932,8.329178653251315,1.9500357819736376,1582,62,306,29,35,528,193,401,0.18899999999999997,0.6829999999999999,0.128,-0.9877,0,0,0,0,0,1,48.0,0,0,2,3,15,28,2,0,16,2,36,4,1,2,2,58,76,29,1,4,9,4,6,5,0,1,3,1,0,4,25,18,0,1,16,0,0,5,13,17,0,0,15,8,43,11,39,55,7,26,0,12,1,0,27,8,0,4,17,203,68,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06739714475609979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493386878810938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333095382767838,0.0,0.07572255576166972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500280759037075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904209851535263,0.0,0.0,0.08258325151049699,0.0,0.0856855510614106,0.06977293637373434,0.0,0.08753047870981495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350577804860362,0.4883465306707402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174052729289647,0.08369298367828985,0.09033460995066836,0.16049600763734767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204776085290064,0.17359578674579446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15540206260717546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922885263915631,0.0,0.07162660413185869,0.0,0.0,0.15993827158358356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858301984854443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454126963645392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354378190110364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282633621384587,0.11442310910942452,0.19785859700844055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406705078241456,0.0,0.0,0.08823098648131743,0.08997094567687319,0.0,0.08162732080311637,0.0,0.0817852785520658,0.0,0.06465213793661688,0.0,0.0,0.060059275964234514,0.06247094771010118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06160292152826806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22461632534751771,0.07072466530908042,0.08462607243482381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757406256753997,0.0,0.0873299583702135,0.07750451513354943,0.0,0.08142574857626493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441316658915025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844989803840466,0.0,0.0,0.06700270087820336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20588900564322865,0.0,0.16021894727927866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859908634508037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060900704957542774,0.13020686699318393,0.07079615841854585,0.0,0.18525742407836088,0.09404536764301183,0.0,0.10380098875086663,0.0,0.06430366988296553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739742773674953,0.0,0.054992586370643234,0.0,0.0,0.2529665252540696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497201849802588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05753892856817117,0.08855901838306747,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mia-panina,2020/03/12,"Does any one else get suspicious when life is going well and you’re happy? I’ve started working out regularly, I’m enjoying reading again, doing better in school, making more of an effort in my relationships and I can’t shake the feeling that this is suspicious and that I will die soon. Idk where this paranoias came from, but it’s very distressing. Any help would be appreciated!",4.918779342723006,7.205821746478874,5.6447183098591545,75.66923708920191,70.97183098591547,8.67699530516432,28.734741784037556,9.2995712137729,2.7624065727699523,308,12,53,7,6,100,60,71,0.17300000000000001,0.608,0.21899999999999997,0.6954,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,5,6,0,2,2,0,7,1,0,1,0,9,14,5,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,1,0,3,1,2,1,1,1,1,3,4,5,10,1,11,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,4,33,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3346137293825494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21759097685111128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813894601378819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25533728722570986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215299973237838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20552407261887304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243986940937266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12853900540396127,0.0,0.1398228706790032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619004229032204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490677916294172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17377621668069676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16422499974311985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16671433025370322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460936785192955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641410324268505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24899256005305784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17413924773961878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029981236181739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22120790964957784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17911065903556153,0.0,0.0,0.1747705930429762,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cananegrogetadick,2020/03/12,"I feel incredibly isolated half the time and have no idea why I should have no reason to feel this way. I just got into my dream school, I am doing great at sports, I am doing hobbies that I enjoy, and I have plenty of friends (this last one has some caveats). Every time I think about my life, I feel extremely alienated from my family and friends and the world in general. I get in my head and overanalyze my friend's actions and begin to doubt our friendships altogether, even tho I am confident in retrospect that I have no reason to. Ive always been an introverted person but I dont have social anxiety or am socially retarded or anything like that. I also get frequent mood swings in which at certain points I feel great about my life and future and friendships but at the turn of a dime i return to feeling very isolated and unsure.

​

Im not depressed and I dont think i have anxiety or anything. I really cant understand why I feel this way. Its just the underlying feeling of alienation and that no one can really understand my situation or understand me. I sometimes wonder if its just a symptom of my factory model education and general Anomie. I feel like maybe urban American society which seems to ruthlessly encourage independence and discourage strong, traditional community in a lot of ways is to blame and there isn't anything I can do. I don't understand why I feel like this so often.",8.071055437100213,7.533259858208963,8.783176972281456,66.18708955223882,62.358208955223894,12.881023454157784,38.172707889125796,12.161744961471696,4.917215565031982,1134,51,197,35,14,384,137,268,0.111,0.6970000000000001,0.192,0.9689,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,0,0,1,11,16,0,1,8,0,25,4,1,3,1,56,47,24,0,2,11,0,9,3,3,1,3,0,0,1,12,15,0,1,20,2,1,1,10,3,0,3,2,9,36,12,24,44,2,23,0,2,0,0,8,12,0,11,10,144,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240408938174735,0.07533578811348393,0.09809908220237144,0.11001492230664696,0.0,0.0,0.13852433468065778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22351790640694505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798119827882764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21222231300435868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059800224812604864,0.0,0.07628310069678157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535221021267769,0.0,0.4120136259526713,0.12936230909090635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20985086328337466,0.0,0.0946058907676925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241239299725075,0.19963936530229906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291924203671706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220762883899276,0.09779776975086428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380145448910186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790089453119582,0.13269849986613888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769731091749925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095870003438414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270328113885345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07905525403789053,0.0,0.0,0.08558871884206634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600333781678365,0.1861785579610462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163040768954696,0.0,0.08242340058081417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176974721258801,0.0,0.1845864309299288,0.0,0.0,0.08954548970640756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410479667055892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602760506850213,0.0,0.0,0.10558816018690922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984805470422998,0.0,0.3770176044363278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470424346567897,0.0,0.2155971813779524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450923788213727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981857969943552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001492230664696,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway755403,2020/03/12,"Who else experiences this? Ever since I was a kid I had these ""episodes"" where I would kinda zone out and everything around me would get all small and kinda tunnel visiony. It's hard to explain but it was really weird and trippy feeling. Sometimes it would be the whole world around me is kinda small/far away/weird looking and other times it was only one part of my field of view (ie my hand or someone's face). 


Literally for the longest time I thought nothing of it and just assumed it was one of those weird things your brain does sometimes. Only recently I learned that it's probably a form of disassociation and not normal or good. I have experienced what I assume to be disassociation before where I forgot who I was and felt really uncomfortable I guess? but now I'm starting to think I've probably experienced more than I'd like to admit, especially considering that the whole trippy thing happens to me fairly often (maybe once a month on average, it isnt too consistent tbh) 


Also I have no idea why I even started doing this ever since I was a child, the only thing I can think of was that I was a pretty anxious child but idk if that's a good enough explanation.


But has anyone else experienced this? Is it even common?  
Also is there a name for this? Ever since I found out this probably isnt common or normal I've been super interesting in learning more about it",4.363070175438594,6.156426710526322,5.674812030075191,76.93773182957395,71.36842105263158,8.224561403508767,26.576441102756892,8.841846274778883,2.103656140350877,1099,37,201,21,21,368,143,266,0.08800000000000001,0.8140000000000001,0.099,0.7857,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,1,17,7,0,0,11,0,25,3,3,0,4,50,41,17,0,6,10,0,4,1,0,3,0,0,0,3,28,11,0,1,13,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,14,9,22,5,21,22,8,22,0,0,2,0,9,10,0,11,13,148,50,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615742740366383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141259358746389,0.0,0.07063682645753129,0.10350882362653267,0.0,0.17986172891110982,0.0,0.0,0.09491335359496116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08596215381525768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277379463152774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08840490178748484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878158581807193,0.0,0.0,0.10438257598509676,0.0,0.13344795844860352,0.2741401410478385,0.0,0.0,0.09079192493387267,0.0988187539606772,0.0,0.0,0.051079682772178434,0.0,0.0969968184274662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076524435063156,0.0,0.0,0.052779747148622026,0.0,0.0,0.1694646698115817,0.0,0.0,0.11128695717757987,0.0,0.08933328840428979,0.0,0.09049573496655954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404137232909906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049354173142940834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483291107202079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149002667435583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063467693670551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979599282358673,0.0969331897351611,0.0,0.0,0.10758497334871184,0.13691004017323996,0.2304950076357388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10939681913941547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277553955162326,0.32675592199201714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294343679591858,0.0,0.09974688959649773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506989549748843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559548575247015,0.0,0.19982638572090694,0.0,0.14300757089979918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013432850249452,0.12946144490755127,0.0,0.08020006472084211,0.11781330636667699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115650676207783,0.22557457585316865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152890715351388,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Slightly_bruised-ham,2020/03/12,"I want to run away Extra info is not needed, I just don’t want to be home anymore; can someone contact me and just cheer me up, it sounds stupid but I haven’t been happy and my family is ignoring it. All I ask is someone give me the time of day my family won’t give, please. Please contact me.",3.4159523809523837,3.506768333333333,5.162023809523814,86.10589285714286,72.01587301587301,8.204761904761906,25.273809523809533,8.07648339933343,1.26792380952381,227,6,51,3,4,78,42,63,0.083,0.6940000000000001,0.223,0.8248,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,0,9,0,0,0,1,12,15,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,1,1,10,2,5,12,2,5,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,35,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20905620760878368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19706883828336985,0.0,0.19805282977912295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594807404873374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974455350969801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4044356881089018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243997161153109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211448830270672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563049691516517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4627885384041717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3572190324648965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291873497131325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24866971266081406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Reddit_Bogs,2020/03/12,"I don’t want to self diagnose myself but I think I need help Recently I’ve become very disconnected and sad. And my friends and mom have noticed. So I am 15 and I’ve been having mood swings of anger, sadness, and stress. So a couple weeks ago I finally told my mom how I’ve been feeling and she brushed it off. So that’s been real heavy on me that I rather talk to my friends and math teacher about what I should do. My family has a big history of mental health issues. I’ve had problems falling asleep and staying asleep as well. Eating way to much food I’m already overweight so it doesn’t help. I can’t stay focused in class because I just start getting angry out of no where then I feel the tears starting to run. I haven’t cleaned my room in months. I’ve picked up here and there when I’ve had friends Over but even then I just pushed everything into my closet. And it’s not because I’m lazy I just can’t mentally deal with it all. I haven’t had friends Over in about a month and there so much trash in my room I could grab on the way out but I don’t. Sorry if this isn’t ok to post here but I am pretty sure I need help.",0.4873585505403675,2.571752020661158,1.9854545454545445,97.40587412587412,84.57851239669421,5.0453909726637,20.464717101080733,6.297961479604792,-0.029084424666242725,887,27,207,8,26,286,133,242,0.14,0.6729999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.9005,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,21,13,1,1,5,1,22,7,2,2,2,39,34,26,0,8,10,2,3,0,4,1,3,0,4,1,8,15,3,0,3,0,0,3,10,5,1,0,7,4,28,7,25,25,3,36,0,2,0,0,14,17,0,1,11,129,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405787331480773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12954119214225165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431179500596348,0.12964643889769742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372521109001608,0.12988820599700865,0.0,0.0,0.12102244816509955,0.0,0.11914691475123736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011780030564033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753403504482058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10550126613320653,0.0,0.11066348460261552,0.0,0.11871036350583734,0.0,0.0,0.12859342672430027,0.0,0.0,0.14194670956886388,0.0,0.3627764330092053,0.0,0.06133067620744637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247785471797376,0.0,0.0,0.2360492267418048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252315542086654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366001115515933,0.0,0.0,0.2749681193280724,0.1873968531289655,0.0,0.17258819317899513,0.1740842557741194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364765064597306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124257887947825,0.11942636482393172,0.0,0.11232499576079344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361387794698418,0.0,0.0,0.11590703857137405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246186686123628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13140687926650646,0.16617645024656014,0.25024116628759896,0.0,0.0,0.13446819588711806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063732611294884,0.0,0.0,0.09435247583856332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521784763969336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216979717177113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968578537792367,0.06923881258714364,0.18635514575299972,0.0941620199776189,0.0,0.10554641090155978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chloemoreland,2020/03/12,"Thoughts on punching walls? Sometimes, I get so upset that I resort to punching/kicking walls (in private).

I read that this is unhealthy and causes you to form a habit. Whenever I get the urge, I remind myself this. But on some days, it just gets so bad that I HAVE to do it.

What do you guys think? Honestly just want someone to tell me its okay :(",1.7924844720496864,4.035270028985508,2.790517598343687,92.6126086956522,80.59420289855072,5.102277432712215,24.349896480331264,6.1826913282559595,0.6071722567287781,268,10,55,2,7,85,49,69,0.192,0.726,0.08199999999999999,-0.8838,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,0,0,4,4,0,1,2,1,4,0,0,1,0,9,10,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,10,2,7,9,2,6,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,40,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25823070989828056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31770939247727303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994560194901459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4847483969833676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30622969221133245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093575002002008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620466924600507,0.0,0.30587970255720426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703189385149356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19817016715828303,0.0,0.2455288559954481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18241770397315268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,d3athpoke2,2020/03/12,"Need some advice I finally made an appointment to talk to a therapist next week. I have been avoiding this for years, I tried a couple different types of medications over the years and I am not getting better. I have trouble talking to people, especially about these dark parts of my mind. I am worried that I won’t be able to tell this person how much I am hurting. Any advice on how to open up to a therapist? Or even just advice in general, Im extremely nervous.",5.200366300366298,6.026245318681326,6.533791208791207,75.23204212454212,68.34065934065934,10.022710622710623,32.74908424908425,10.125756701596842,3.411526007326008,368,16,68,9,6,125,66,91,0.17,0.83,0.0,-0.9153,1,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,2,5,0,8,1,0,3,0,13,11,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,9,1,14,7,3,10,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,2,5,50,13,1,0.16334665163590004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4788613724264989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108132450777213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14446683914710845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807399631321545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17066248439695092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10788892284654997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17893827254587472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534188359533779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17486596899203713,0.0,0.1764424141929249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15456255133469438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645545665838369,0.0,0.0,0.1649335532562019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200785838590116,0.12111947243011245,0.0,0.0,0.17372101714213925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17688850570668116,0.0,0.11324400098280718,0.1426279956344005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26258370224748784,0.14277217332488745,0.0,0.0,0.3793161049827098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090165410495713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102683102418086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658864537714151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21037977624635348
mentalhealth,Info2muchhh,2020/03/12,"How to I be a better person? I feel I am still growing mentally and have realized some fuck ups in my life.. I also feel like I make excuses for myself, even if I think they are legitimate and don't know if that's good or bad. 

A lot of my anger with myself comes from how I have behaved online. I spent like 3 years being a dick to so many random people around me by using tinder/ fb/ insta/ etc. Literally it feels like a blackout in my mind. I feel like I was so sucked into this online realm. It was an escape from my shitty life... But then I made a shitty online life.  My problem is I just did it all as me. I didn't make a fake name or pic. Nah son. Straight up ass hole as himself being a dick. 

Looking back on this I literally hate myself. Started smoking pot a few years ago. I truly feel it opened my mind and perspective. It helped me learn the addiction I had with social media and being a dick. It was a habit though and I couldn't break it. Went through a lot of mental break downs last year. It started with a few screenshots of me straight up asking a friend's sister if she wanted a sugar daddy. Let me assure you I can't afford to be anyone's sugar daddy, nor would I want to... But when an ex becomes a prostitute, you try to learn about all this shit you see in bios. My mind instead of trying to research online for answers decides to just go out and dm these people and see how they react to such absurd language and behaviour. It was fucking incredible... Incredibly douchy. I didn't care at all about these people. Just only cares about the statistic and knowing how many people would respond in favor of this proposal. 

I can't fathom how I was and honestly have been suicidal and depressed for years now and last year was in the hospital twice for being suicidal... I want to love myself. I want to be proud of myself again. I want to be okay being me again. I don't know how to be a better person. And I don't know if maybe leaving this community and starting over is the right way or to somehow give back to this one. I also suffered a broken jaw when I was younger and feel that maybe some of the impact from that car crash impacted my brain. I say this because while trying to quit social media and this addiction I had.... I would like relapse and download it all and start doing the same thing... Just for 20 minutes later I come to and realize what the fuck I am doing. It's crazy because I feel like I'm always a few minutes behind myself when it comes to my reasoning... Heeeelllllppppp",3.0210077779911657,4.601456116141733,4.45676205108508,85.17819377760709,74.45275590551181,6.767121183022858,24.004417130785484,7.407850130929222,1.0622196466295373,1969,59,391,23,41,655,233,508,0.146,0.746,0.10800000000000001,-0.9734,1,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,0,3,2,4,32,30,7,0,27,1,43,18,7,12,5,98,88,47,2,14,13,3,7,6,1,3,5,1,0,2,27,29,2,0,19,0,1,7,9,12,0,2,16,13,63,18,58,57,13,53,0,2,3,8,23,19,9,13,30,292,90,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15937294529450968,0.0,0.0,0.06479604196343704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691122020910175,0.06082252390002501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051111091924051735,0.0,0.0,0.06507178918578428,0.06833578743212708,0.0,0.0,0.11241409585587832,0.06103290583395806,0.08911845305285072,0.08072984607143563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929663661248272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160037862830108,0.0,0.0,0.1490544386387935,0.0,0.0,0.18889966802854646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629583019549995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152242936414147,0.04827985070538508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587201244428642,0.20888192274810227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056474527654183364,0.20273087663644335,0.0,0.07012126182231675,0.04154268518374205,0.06131025947086088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216811172880422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04899534946009164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16068870366884952,0.11916755215351844,0.0,0.07739912309674159,0.0,0.07474659100394915,0.1548916273910833,0.21426888552483608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06138303394184647,0.0,0.0,0.12428883774077795,0.06597285758920611,0.06916610812489069,0.0975855728107725,0.14821768275603198,0.14687143641273814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732908013861276,0.0,0.2214212669129288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495323898280399,0.05559352967434634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20270490487727572,0.12765088674453054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994391589034664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774761145292221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751558460780948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06242440188392449,0.0,0.0581296341042742,0.0,0.0,0.1164976216698496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750329759300987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14902628469146462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20695360957331535,0.0,0.05837532428424155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15991241368593184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04856237020306337,0.0468375785205234,0.07181738912002726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888410678035072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631323013911215,0.0,0.0,0.21557239558040645,0.05802096208416109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776161146706469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15577794299821665,0.0,0.0,0.2353602186540661
mentalhealth,cpeyton94,2020/03/12,"Severe OCD in video games. Can anyone here relate to this?

I get really stressed out over small insignificant issues and details that occur while I'm playing video games.

It's got to the point now where I can't even enjoy them anymore. And I'm considering deleting my Steam account so I can destroy all the imperfections and start fresh. But this would mean throwing away hundreds of pounds worth of games. It would be a very illogical decision but I'm getting tired of having no peace of mind when I want to unwind after work and play.

My mind puts too much emphasis on things that simply shouldn't matter, and I'm not even fully sure of the reasons. 

I'm on 40mg of citalopram and I'm thinking about seeing a psychologist.

So far nothing has helped so I'm trying to get peoples perspectives here on reddit, maybe find people who have dealt with it before and found a cure.",4.226069315300084,6.2417592189349165,4.688271344040576,82.95054733727812,72.19526627218934,6.958748943364327,25.68089602704987,7.7094869923839395,1.4429286559594248,704,23,129,9,14,223,115,169,0.11800000000000001,0.8009999999999999,0.081,-0.6461,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,12,6,1,1,6,0,10,1,0,1,2,27,27,14,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,9,9,0,0,6,8,2,2,4,2,0,0,2,1,7,4,20,21,2,18,0,0,1,0,6,11,0,0,5,77,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16680150755939832,0.11760392493051484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802214610811008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431192083669419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221787766322667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372466037666754,0.0,0.0,0.184414109959394,0.0,0.0,0.2636205106942329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451869904804195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273571318748266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554900093098982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16897171173711922,0.1832106566953212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3396524325318868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236406489083016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16138499052959368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23320664379130826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899603141496124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16907965629200414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774825580572044,0.1729296351835194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402743942354833,0.0,0.0,0.19000935727619692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904733321157085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19266364275300066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851919580497947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173945076922544,0.10777079614029247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19331223789756585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419149058786858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387762125849488,0.09920414091172727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244595394045328,0.0,0.0,0.2389578833679253,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sarabom,2020/03/12,"8 months diarrhea and social anxiety 17 F
Height 5’3
Weight 200lbs
Caucasian
No smoking,no drinking
Medical conditions - social anxiety,depression,PTSD
Not taking any medication

Last year may I started having diarrhea everyday after I ate any meal , I did blood test and also got my feces análised and didn’t found anything ,doctors said it was fine . But The diarrhea never stopped , for a few days I had normal solid feces but than it came back to the same. About 2 weeks ago my situation got worse and everyday when I try to go to school I have diarrhea and start throwing up at the same time without even had ate anything in the morning , I can’t go to classes because of this I don’t feel good . I also have social anxiety and struggle a lot with being around people it makes feel really anxious . Any idea of what could be causing me this ? How could I fix it ?? I really need some help I am failing a lot of classes because of this and my life it’s being like hell .  Anyone experienced the same as me ? Please let me know",3.7540161242161822,5.851863010152286,5.042102120035832,79.55314422215591,73.72081218274111,8.087070767393254,29.354732756046577,8.841846274778883,2.6298118244252016,811,35,145,17,17,269,126,197,0.132,0.779,0.08900000000000001,-0.8961,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,8,6,1,1,8,0,18,10,1,3,1,35,35,14,0,4,4,0,3,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,9,10,5,1,5,1,0,4,7,3,0,0,12,5,18,3,19,16,7,25,1,1,0,0,5,5,1,4,17,97,27,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356362508824336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18685940393051487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383472422716021,0.0,0.17875077795553507,0.13198576616046848,0.0,0.08169094595099036,0.0,0.1922839032787534,0.10400435234702264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983582117887202,0.0,0.14243817648024878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336235305345818,0.0,0.1200176111984034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18656008072118896,0.0,0.0,0.0753463245505463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958147070212212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444989398091301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716576825155883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814651970653088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12809915228759444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327954900688435,0.09799229294724586,0.18688083377870007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830935113931217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318879690711234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420725772133967,0.09523285157505967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946760469914727,0.08252118464010348,0.0570777212520981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986510626945812,0.0,0.0,0.07798559426129059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23538986607187395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325338305469216,0.0,0.0,0.08662870008987207,0.09010726330985354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446956643572398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099589934869796,0.0,0.0,0.12824534535286586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656917741936567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496898500035471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113302726858364,0.0,0.0,0.11823920105191722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132292985579186,0.0,0.35728344992406075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16538715470154502,0.0,0.0,0.09767594052447236,0.0,0.12213711939996845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784236606799062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812509087235147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932057447222275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371477451794223,0.14226867360970896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262090701091855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190607618367008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523532829098054
mentalhealth,razorozx,2020/03/12,"Depression getting worse. Stuck. Please help. So I don't know how to start this off or even introduce my problems. I hope someone reads this and responds because I am suffering and need help.

I am 24 years old, living with my parents. My dad is ignorant, stubborn, and illogical but provides basic needs for the family. My mother is caring, illogical, and stubborn in few cases and provides emotional help and physical help when needed. My sister moved away and she is stubborn, logical, and sometimes misinformed. My friends are usually busy but provided emotional and mental help when needed. I don't have many friends, but they're there.

My dog died last month on the 11th of February. My friend helped me take him out every weekend until his death. We were all there -- friend included. During this time I began to feel romantic emotions towards her. However, after my dog's passing I developed a heart condition that same night. The doctor called it ""Broken Heart Syndrome"" in which the heart's cells get stunned and fail to perform properly. So now I'm left with depression, stress, and sadness as well as a malfunctioning heart.

Aside from recent history, I got brain damage sometime around Winter 2018. As of today my cognitive capacity is slightly stunted compared to before and my emotional side has opened up moderately. The day of my concussion I was working on some cognitively demanding stuff, which just adds more salt to the burn.

My friend that was there to help me take care of my dog until his passing has had relationship problems. I was there to help her out with it. I was there to let her vent, to add suggestions, and come to realizations. She has an ex that she still has feelings for, but decided to break up because it's always been long distance and arguments generally don't end well -- as well as the guy's anger issues. She has another friend that she has a small amount of feelings for, but doesn't want to pursue. She doesn't want a relationship for a year simply because she wants to take a break from that sort of thing and to remove any feelings towards her ex.

Now for my current problems.

I have romantic feelings for my friend. I love her. However, she is a person that is so unique that I don't see myself meeting anyone like her in my lifetime and I don't think I can settle for less. She literally set the new standard for me. She sees me as a friend, which is understandable, but I fear that I'll live a lonely life because of this whole thing. It hurts me to know that she has feelings for other guys -- I know it's selfish, but I can't help it. It also hurts when she talks to me about them, even though I am trying to be a good friend and help her out. It's hard.

My heart problem prevents me from doing simple basic things. Things like going to the kitchen and preparing food. It's not that I can't, but that I feel like I ran a mile -- and still running while I am simply standing up. So I am physically stuck. I can't do much. Going to the doctor is definitely on my to-do list, but I am trying to avoid it simply because of the current pandemic. I am, however, slowly getting better so maybe I will be able to completely take it off my list of things to do within time.

I am depressed because my dog died. I have a lingering feeling of sadness at any given moment. However, I don't think that I am feeling depression because of my dog anymore, but rather I am just depressed for an unknown reason. Maybe it's because I want to be with someone that doesn't see me the same way. I don't know.

I am lonely. My friends are busy. When they aren't they're just doing normal things. I try to get in touch with the friend that I like, but I feel like I'm bugging her. She used to reply within an hour or two, but now it's almost up to half a day. I usually call her because I'm feeling lonely or when I'm having anxiety. She always cheers me up -- temporarily of course. I care for her and would do anything to make her happy, but I don't think she would do the same. At this point I care more about talking to someone than her position with other guys -- It still hurts to know, however.

I am paranoid. Due to the pandemic and my constantly being out of breath, sometimes I feel like I am infected. Which leads me to have anxiety and paranoia. Which leads me to call my friend that I like only to get a reply later in the day. By that time I would of called someone else or just distracted me enough to feel the surge of depression when I'm not distracted. Of course, because I have a heart problem that causes breathing problems, I am more vulnerable to death by infection, which gets me paranoid.

​

I am just sad, depressed, paranoid, anxious, tired, lethargic and much more. I don't know what to do anymore. I'm lost and suffering.",4.256655918230766,5.856411645788338,5.081144100021295,81.86298740607796,71.31101511879051,8.111069874973381,29.456940346180755,8.678591145306115,2.320405609466735,3768,152,712,67,71,1223,341,926,0.196,0.644,0.16,-0.9901,8,7,0,0,0,0,126.0,1,0,2,7,39,70,4,5,35,0,78,18,9,7,1,131,147,64,4,20,25,6,15,7,12,4,6,0,1,4,52,40,2,6,26,2,0,11,18,38,3,2,14,19,125,32,113,124,16,95,0,21,3,1,78,33,0,8,53,500,177,7,0.03921370605252805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03926686220350339,0.0,0.0,0.03135918656268491,0.06525788956039842,0.04248803412460081,0.04764894500783745,0.053333329621994184,0.0411189899020921,0.0599967555951011,0.04430032610169452,0.07777891873392803,0.027419135036007358,0.0,0.0322695388569362,0.034908512175221416,0.0,0.0,0.036842567672617774,0.0,0.0,0.23904311241160506,0.0,0.0333679756247781,0.0,0.0,0.034681336335439766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04377546470584871,0.16016631293921993,0.0,0.15992394710824506,0.04028327802841602,0.0,0.033779135545425096,0.041114824724096964,0.04237608531848777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586878900475821,0.0,0.2364229529384524,0.0,0.08139527167354052,0.0,0.0,0.08027377954352342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03275801961402923,0.17644056515421933,0.034731704317940516,0.04051824083663249,0.0,0.05180056602884985,0.0,0.03303923862252877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03696719213585758,0.044126321368322605,0.2577591642624945,0.08404283831758498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047417369013165366,0.0,0.36355694426855395,0.0,0.12292525755848935,0.0,0.0445721056597246,0.032890596155178344,0.031362782970428445,0.0,0.0,0.11648320248625772,0.0,0.04174371926881725,0.03512777826623708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27881058287327426,0.26284120577561826,0.0,0.0,0.038948058149272005,0.03861760146218133,0.0,0.12593725009917212,0.0,0.0,0.0409289210781608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12930496391676036,0.03196440421643753,0.0,0.0,0.04260580636382712,0.04009867124857983,0.027697800271963453,0.13410485211524525,0.0,0.06925284174556247,0.034702895873121406,0.0,0.0,0.04280639241255574,0.0,0.03539190071770875,0.0,0.026175453289480285,0.03975654310272436,0.07879087682018739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039518192538852887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03130000605054967,0.041677963674907115,0.05765317187091019,0.11630586465153735,0.0,0.03787284166160055,0.0,0.03679940672099831,0.0384211060733381,0.0,0.0,0.04114818804675804,0.0,0.0,0.029823790490217838,0.0,0.0,0.04354217994209535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034239895581914835,0.0,0.04304487359075559,0.03706962720956701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22513332459353072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03922431783829591,0.0,0.0,0.04031822085551927,0.03871880395012403,0.08420168996119952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937447401246818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290258354008433,0.0,0.11635007393345305,0.0,0.027755662975816758,0.0,0.09394834892387406,0.0,0.04491916779388799,0.0,0.044890311633169186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793530698227525,0.06303698307247399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631106315376314,0.07537967837522315,0.0385272670977484,0.0,0.06859748204249917,0.04507038653818619,0.03717000819949775,0.0,0.0,0.07987059706319337,0.0,0.03830609283897564,0.04082285094630251,0.0,0.033868051567931566,0.08637671429239555,0.0,0.09251703928748607,0.031126014616722375,0.0,0.0,0.10577349335399246,0.0,0.0,0.0437807024054707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028548045039225436,0.0,0.039962116588158236,0.0835688750505755,0.0,0.04764894500783745,0.05050468205194608
mentalhealth,princentt,2020/03/12,does anyone else go to therapy? what’s it like for you guys? Do you guys ever feel like you’re just getting repetitive generic advice or breathing exercises? Because that’s all I feel like I’m getting and I think I’m wasting my time and money. Doesn’t seem to be helping me at all. Thoughts?,0.8580084745762733,3.4077899491525443,2.686250000000001,88.9392055084746,90.18644067796608,4.983898305084747,26.019067796610173,6.6274283507984215,1.2660661016949155,233,11,45,3,8,77,43,59,0.078,0.746,0.177,0.7149,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,3,12,13,3,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,5,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,6,3,4,11,2,5,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,6,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203730692740204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768706402678026,0.23106930643815066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747336129498278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19735186456636214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18839091493894655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20399346979775526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280568256448147,0.32221946241493904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356471485294105,0.0,0.12816677969132714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4465955176770735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511596116711467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3305293449894197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053026419534441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578988899179835,0.0,0.0,0.1445024937835379,0.0,0.1790356868338467,0.13150105487410474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jay101112,2020/03/12,"I need some advice. Hello,

I’m a 16 yo who recently started worrying about my mental health. I went to my pediatrician and got prescribed antidepressants which have been working well, but I’m not sure of the exact nature of my mental state. From some surface level research I think I might be bipolar and I’ve expressed a desire to be tested for such. However, my doctor advised me that I shouldn’t have to take and testing if it would not change my treatment (it won’t). I personally feel like wanting to know exactly what I have. Am I worrying too much? Should I seek testing anyways?

Tl;dr: I want to get tested for bipolar but my doctor doesn’t recommend it. Advice?

Thanks for any advice you have.",3.3371297359357044,5.81354091044776,4.7210447761194025,79.57418484500577,76.4626865671642,6.809644087256029,27.471871412169925,7.882392219407189,2.031580482204363,558,23,96,9,13,185,86,134,0.055,0.813,0.132,0.8806,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,1,5,4,0,0,3,0,14,5,0,0,3,24,28,6,0,8,5,0,1,1,0,5,5,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,0,1,0,3,1,18,4,12,18,3,6,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,4,3,69,25,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.480889650497456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155182354479053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17353101093311069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3358007667767928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294280810504881,0.11718915653249573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570335996615774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311965953218122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436528351371516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015128451283708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014093843213807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3306245060751071,0.17401895445339155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058719192902292,0.12163248931566965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323211459764856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16196825575009274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610731377889234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15460437046999326,0.0,0.12333655752820367,0.0,0.0,0.15102463647710487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510926457650188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935083467436101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749033609275786,0.15206535804793853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942200141395687,0.3331781737673681,0.0,0.11652826315240382,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alicanto_Xenica,2020/03/12,"Is grief supposed to last this long or is it just teenage hormones? There a lot of details involved in this story that may have led to my problems, but I want to keep this long story short. So I'll sum things up, and you're free to ask me questions if you like.

I don't want to reveal my age here, but I am between 13 and 18 years old, female. 4 years ago, I moved a couple hundred miles to my current home. I didn't think it would hit me so hard at the time, but now I just can't get my old house out of my mind. I started a new school and met a friend who really wasn't a good influence on me. Missing my old friends caused me to cling to her. I wanted someone who would provide a sense of security and safety like my old friends did. She did the opposite. She noticed my clinginess and started to ignore me. I struggled with abandonment issues and depression for a while after that. Seasonal depression hit me too, because my new home was dark and rainy compared to my old home which had temperate weather. Ever since I moved, I've struggled with abandonment issues, seasonal depression, anxiety (especially social), and insecurity. I miss what life was like 4 years ago. I made this post because I'm starting to experience some weird symptoms. I asked my family if they miss our old home and they say they don't. I felt offended. I felt like there was no one left who understood how sad I am now. I've gone back to having imaginary friends. I see the sun as a best friend who really understands me. I have one-sided conversations with my grandpa, who died recently. Every day feels like a dream, and I keep thinking I'll wake up from a coma one day and the past 4 years will have never happened. The pain of losing family members, my old friends no longer enjoying my company, and the new owner of my old house straight-up destroying it hurts. I'm so angry and sad that this happened. I want to wake up. I'm ready to go see my family when everyone was alive and acted the way they used to. 

I want to go home. It hurts so bad.",3.7535790335790296,4.988740692874696,4.893137592137595,84.14493161343165,72.04668304668304,8.375069615069615,28.308681408681412,8.841846274778883,2.1124621457821458,1590,60,326,30,30,524,201,407,0.215,0.615,0.17,-0.9757,1,0,0,0,2,0,48.0,1,1,4,2,16,41,3,3,17,0,24,6,2,6,2,60,62,28,2,10,8,1,4,5,6,4,4,1,5,0,20,18,0,6,9,1,1,7,8,25,0,2,15,7,53,17,36,41,3,59,0,14,2,0,30,10,0,7,45,195,73,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989910011322032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04742145136652191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159027822803872,0.0,0.0,0.04766575087091555,0.05175826505137286,0.07557589551162032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505368052008778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367982704933436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685897015750394,0.0,0.07995561431813655,0.0,0.1601732263233405,0.0,0.0643348440902496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05607264204956445,0.052228445754593136,0.05923319099442845,0.0,0.060637182837672436,0.1753132701899549,0.0,0.031343524780522984,0.044284987640312135,0.11903841280976375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28735550415329913,0.0,0.03238671861062579,0.0,0.07045960801982742,0.05199347166419305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963341927215536,0.0,0.05553001031950285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109003426389555,0.0,0.0,0.14305407510886586,0.13272111403524042,0.0,0.0,0.12940091984245206,0.0,0.11019742658941137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050529346961335,0.0,0.0,0.06735128106089293,0.0,0.043784697206653636,0.15142358614750015,0.0,0.0,0.10971671201894614,0.0,0.06934988753025087,0.0,0.0527008711023474,0.0,0.058655535206520976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259126648865163,0.0,0.0,0.13176909370257048,0.0,0.0,0.04780977463361343,0.17960822392678405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057494099366904,0.5203766180821056,0.0,0.12601614782961193,0.0,0.06596071667623435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059175559671951136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059368371774648515,0.0,0.0,0.059315146279161166,0.0,0.0,0.0694419196214148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942354179595178,0.0,0.061206705605281964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04929617831884952,0.0,0.06273622511108376,0.09879448959298552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05127798034529172,0.0,0.0,0.06319002706234048,0.05252311845297377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162849979781968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12960882260581702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443035512795653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04118276844512552,0.07944015675822277,0.0,0.0,0.03614631187168005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453278420111527,0.0,0.053538633693674696,0.0,0.0,0.1828137303271259,0.04920402024209032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807048102646402,0.0,0.0,0.1596756557885321
mentalhealth,bean_spaghetti,2020/03/12,"Started counseling today It’s taken me almost 9 months to make myself do it but I finally started going to counseling again. I met with an intake counselor this morning and I really liked her, so we’re meeting again next week. 
I’m actually excited to be taking care of myself. If you’ve been thinking of talking to someone, take the leap and try it. I know it’s a huge step to take, but I can’t describe how good I felt walking out of her office today.",2.060350241545894,4.248989358695649,4.429275362318844,81.51379227053141,79.32608695652175,6.697584541062803,26.52657004830918,7.793537801064563,1.8649164251207733,359,15,66,6,9,125,67,92,0.0,0.799,0.201,0.9603,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,2,0,13,18,7,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,4,1,11,4,10,13,0,15,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,11,42,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.20404673825201125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20937862407658536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131864766077073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20076416813823594,0.2290535547149636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883361225635032,0.1753791207542794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149132453842479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215334560279984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957265966220586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166897781811254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22237510141886904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13395172972222966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17716567174142306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29599729635088784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4716406707905103,0.16806278934704424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339797516774981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3963955731116132,0.0,0.0,0.14196190527097718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16772354500869133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lena_LS,2020/03/12,"Sociopaths aren't always the monsters we're made out to be. I have major depression, schizotypal, suspected autism and most prominently, sociopathy. However, the last bit usually gets me portrayed as some kind of monster who miraculously never went off on anyone. Sure, my sense of right and wrong is learned by social expectations, but I do have feelings. I constantly feel like I want to be recognized as someone who is struggling inside trying to find someone to relate to. It just really sucks, how the media highlights the murderers and machiavellians of my illness. We're not all like that. Sorry for the rant.",7.178808411214953,9.353098411214956,6.940268691588787,69.12666471962618,64.88785046728971,10.583644859813083,35.80490654205608,10.686352973137794,4.5713,498,24,73,14,8,157,82,107,0.22,0.7020000000000001,0.077,-0.9564,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,2,9,2,1,5,0,8,1,0,2,3,21,15,7,1,2,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,2,2,7,4,15,11,5,9,0,1,0,0,3,4,1,2,6,50,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17172092497166802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443025283846616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22530856447913644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22301856883784316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777508914975106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208699278910651,0.14743467832378904,0.0,0.0,0.18862344246191665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782266620695907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21490829601617584,0.0,0.1682235541232059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20164926223412974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952774614124776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15916948653324636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220941181163248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17624352534154278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21037380407276154,0.34972253516572843,0.0,0.0,0.2310204445247977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21574845209417093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19450643986310054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011539854285188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272934257332287,0.0,0.12172560029989317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19131212999022476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256391811011689,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tmstalkalot,2020/03/12,Advice plz soo.. like what do you do when therapy isn’t available and your mental health isn’t being taken seriously.,4.408636363636365,6.89970895454546,5.863636363636362,72.61545454545455,73.0909090909091,8.036363636363637,24.63636363636364,8.841846274778883,2.2623818181818187,95,3,15,2,2,32,19,22,0.076,0.7559999999999999,0.16899999999999998,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4533148803887063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4931009279875162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266366923182236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.467499170350117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5305067666420761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Time2ThrowawayYay,2020/03/12,"I’m in a slump First off let me say, I don’t know if this is worth being in this sub, but all my life I’ve been great in school, and all of a sudden I get one bad and my confidence goes down the drain and I get into this downward spiral and all my grades struggle, I feel like this slump is going to affect my future and future job opportunities, I also worry that I’m disappointing my parents. Who have always valued my education very highly and to see me struggle has to disappoint them, these thoughts all hit me whenever I write and assignment no matter how prepared I am and it stresses me so much I can’t think straight",3.93236111111111,4.903263000000003,5.259791666666668,82.68381944444445,71.34375,7.876388888888887,25.940972222222207,8.167268648758528,1.5008461805555555,496,15,101,7,9,166,85,128,0.19,0.627,0.182,-0.5023,2,0,0,0,1,0,7.0,0,0,1,2,3,9,0,3,3,0,10,1,0,2,4,23,21,13,0,1,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,8,9,0,0,4,0,1,1,3,6,0,2,2,3,19,3,10,16,5,14,0,2,1,0,5,9,0,1,5,71,27,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16568560929509912,0.1723943504005414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17299065345590314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475885982677748,0.14801286215023526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762312846023359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21649101298831144,0.0,0.11774789612343695,0.0,0.0,0.2284219728598431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189021158917253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20559894435078532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386334744687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21186049467400456,0.14634075105937047,0.10122002772037464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15230466661073014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403937821164276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300542011611808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476166834016218,0.0,0.2096820781483122,0.1650994608838774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373294878067755,0.4331890741309886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13275565375505016,0.0,0.16448158802515736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17094915772341346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21040622086746552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aussieoutdoorblokes,2020/03/12,SPARTAN PROFESSIONAL 1 Mental health [https://youtu.be/TbO9zFGaZI0](https://youtu.be/TbO9zFGaZI0),50.71999999999999,62.53453433333334,22.94666666666667,-64.10999999999996,39.0,14.533333333333335,53.0,8.841846274778883,11.471600000000002,90,3,2,2,2,19,6,6,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7256947839852953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6880167734122008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LolNinja40,2020/03/12,"10M I've had negative thoughts for about 2 and a half years Hello, I'm a ten year old boy. I get mad over the littlest of things. I have suicidal thoughts, mood swings and wake up feeling sad. Most times I feel empty and alone. I sometimes have a little motivation and when I do it I lose tha just the motivation. Never been able to focus. Have nearly attempted suicide once but stopped myself. Sometimes I can't at night for hours. When I wake up I feel like filth and have broken down more than 3 times. I'm sometimes overly happy for extended periods. I get easily distracted. I lose interest in a lot of things. I have problems with memory. 

Please if anyone has possible diagnosis please tell. Thanks for taking the time out of your day. Sorry for bad formatting I'm on mobile.",1.338916040100255,4.017715986842108,3.069699248120301,85.94622807017548,89.78947368421049,6.579448621553887,21.71177944862155,7.793537801064563,1.4776437343358388,618,22,117,14,21,204,103,152,0.231,0.598,0.171,-0.8061,0,1,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,1,0,5,4,12,1,1,7,0,10,2,2,2,1,22,22,9,2,2,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,1,7,0,0,0,3,7,0,2,4,3,14,4,22,18,3,25,0,3,0,0,4,11,0,3,15,73,17,2,0.13596435741261012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081806957471615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506944003166932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352455920452628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768576248048716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062429931389656,0.09713296410253183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14207153005236975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14473658671267636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389750411726914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664253172068317,0.13627200524575378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042186752179931,0.0,0.11559203454076855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486409437336312,0.0,0.0,0.12759333895356872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426717214378165,0.1447976032478394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984960702176125,0.0,0.15327938396262095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009952765631114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4034166782420649,0.15220096655752266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367229087785645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974458782024201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222827580122466,0.0,0.1188388412502592,0.12517771291801053,0.0,0.0,0.1806573551070348,0.0,0.0,0.2158810248390248,0.2378457306110748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511317681431784
mentalhealth,SadAnonymousSupport,2020/03/12,"I need advice Posting anonymously. My SO has multiple mental health disorders. What they are is somewhat irrelevant. SO doesn’t always take medications properly or consistently. When medicated, our relationship is beyond ideal. But when unmedicated, shit hits the fan. I’ve been on this roller coaster for a while now and I’m getting really tired, mentally. I’m no saint, but I do try to be conscientious of myself and my behaviors and seek out help when I need it. My SO does not do this. I often make the appointments and get prescription refills because they do not take the initiative. 

How can I continue to move forward in this? It’s really draining to be so up and down all of the time. Is there like support groups or anything like that? I have my own therapist who I see regularly, FTR.",3.78387755102041,6.539443170068027,5.490503401360545,73.15330612244898,76.48299319727892,9.634285714285717,29.527891156462587,9.888512548439397,3.661859319727893,634,29,109,21,15,215,102,147,0.04,0.84,0.12,0.9155,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,2,1,12,5,1,0,5,0,14,5,1,2,1,20,26,18,0,3,6,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,1,15,4,12,22,3,16,1,0,1,0,7,7,1,4,10,81,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084205716709427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14547273953447945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14387036579502227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657487290385001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003705664930278,0.0,0.15299509436135011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826831370681932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858363371088872,0.0,0.0,0.11718500406402535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708264185459364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670052231932004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3522460856965953,0.3523754610395254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858168443647181,0.0,0.25926876993357395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16743901302284492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240014177847405,0.0,0.0,0.1877022164615307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393170415076888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17946069751919033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19839524973759548,0.0,0.0,0.2629011190849589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029913480914637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194490101873578,0.20094160708398606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11869823599166515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prayandhope4me,2020/03/13,"I am in high school and I feel lost I am so lost and have lost my way. I got in a shit ton of trouble in middle school and mentally it hurts. So much shit hurts me. I have a foot fetish’s that makes my life unbearable and I also struggled with drug problems in 7th grade. I am a loser, drug issues when I was 13 years old wtf is wrong with me. I am pathetic worthless and useless to this world. My dad isn’t doing to well health wise and I am craving drugs. I don’t know what to do. I had a (what I think) was a panic attack where the hallway started spinning literally I was sweating and couldn’t stand up straight and I was very nervous. The reason I think I had it was since I made eye contact with a girl I liked. I am a fucking loser who won’t go anywhere in this world since I already fucked up so much. Should I consider getting mental health help? Should I see a professional",0.6419354838709666,2.766894322580648,2.374634408602152,94.60195161290324,84.26881720430106,5.0103225806451634,21.66559139784946,6.2581,0.2005513978494622,688,23,154,6,20,226,103,186,0.32,0.617,0.063,-0.9942,0,0,3,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,5,7,23,5,3,10,0,24,13,5,3,0,22,40,13,0,4,0,1,1,1,0,3,6,0,0,1,8,11,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,20,1,0,12,3,28,3,14,24,3,20,0,9,2,2,5,13,4,0,5,102,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279775845622154,0.0927424757132977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193447859071553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40347083892744745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05863874391126767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144278181816137,0.06059039345552138,0.0,0.0659093535218859,0.0,0.09275311182329828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465448527864333,0.0,0.0,0.07773334328800936,0.1225304011196241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483000706534053,0.0,0.0,0.12104425800315832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637349784338722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191419646359632,0.05665788358140673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3797902219905772,0.0,0.0,0.10973516641915272,0.07741196781783934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337442653011339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170504993212894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169272385125066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360677278064082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109691937035895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192381572469023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23473897489247844,0.09241437929609288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23808643637274696,0.19186587206191086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208532113215533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123873448569768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861988372510854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568874554539436,0.0,0.09205288692271392,0.0,0.0,0.10427242873880438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679677884851892,0.0,0.07468193154895092
mentalhealth,xplodingturtle,2020/03/13,"Why do I always feel unwanted, unloved, unliked, un-needed, by my friends even though I know they love/like/want me? I also feel very sad when I think about going out with them.

Anyone know what it might be or what I can do to stop thinking like that?

(I do have autism)",1.7967272727272745,3.639064309090912,2.4309090909090934,97.22636363636366,78.63636363636364,5.127272727272729,20.090909090909093,5.6839178017228535,-0.29925454545454544,207,5,47,1,5,64,44,55,0.187,0.715,0.098,-0.6313,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,12,14,4,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,10,2,5,12,0,4,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,2,3,31,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164215332084011,0.22518461192184605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18922975670555264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17874758802523705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736758268546354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20908692664875766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15380442706831726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974607189548041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644308541199095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24425280933786575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870940973453255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006676217405957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262575643636289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34681566190312985,0.2658911511928708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22329687516367944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244200149720584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ConfusedClock,2020/03/13,"Living life just trying to make it until Friday, then repeat. If I am in a rut, what are some ways to get out? During the week I workout, work, eat, sleep, repeat... just trying to make it until the weekend. Sometimes it gets draining, like I can only live for 2 days. I don’t really like my job, but I’m in the military so I have to deal with it until my contract ends. What are some ways to “live” during the week too?",1.9460098522167504,3.2428949310344852,3.905418719211824,89.1993103448276,76.70114942528734,5.8909688013136305,19.32512315270936,6.1826913282559595,-0.013494581280788063,317,6,68,2,7,108,56,87,0.0,0.9520000000000001,0.048,0.4329,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,5,0,6,3,1,2,0,10,11,7,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,13,11,2,16,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,3,13,46,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12629319382784676,0.20189060358743136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003814628854424,0.0,0.0,0.17344594224861132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20462463659725252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943295875973828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831947382734747,0.19134384474207955,0.0,0.5187605082662972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26143411322509097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893641255401946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254527633121436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19596994333480405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936794119415867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659094188366471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108791255517395,0.3141636504057349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425654936439889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PostModernDinosaur,2020/03/13,"I have worked close to 80 hours this week. Is there any kind of doctor I could see to get some days off due to burnout? First of all, that amount of time isn't by any means common in my workplace. This week, though, there were some new, urgent and big projects I had to work on, so I spent the whole week entering work at 7 a.m., not stopping for lunch and leaving somewhere between midnight and 1 a.m. Everyday.

Since the shit had already hit the fan, I just endured the week and managed to get everything done. But I feel like I have been beaten to a pulp right now. I can't focus on anything, I feel like I'm going to fall or pass out constantly, I drove home today seriously thinking I was about to cause an accident. My mental health is gone.

I don't hate my job or my boss, but I don't trust him enough to have an open conversation about needing a break to regain my mental health so I can actually be productive at work again. So I wanted to know if there's any doctor I could see to get some days off due to all this.

(I live in Brazil, btw, so the FMLA doesn't exist here)",4.318231902626522,4.5427503587443985,4.9091383728379245,88.23700672645742,70.0762331838565,7.985778347213325,26.24247277386291,7.7094869923839395,1.1501405509288922,842,23,188,9,14,270,133,223,0.043,0.898,0.06,0.1073,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,7,14,8,3,0,9,0,20,6,1,2,2,31,39,14,0,5,7,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,1,0,4,7,1,1,5,0,1,6,6,4,0,1,9,4,23,4,30,26,8,39,0,0,2,0,2,13,1,6,21,116,27,12,0.0,0.0,0.112498687164825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721664955509746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351873168316053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486733484104166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184264591495732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457898121768245,0.0,0.1840867315876295,0.0,0.0,0.14869481799141926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23599220170679655,0.0,0.11797359997533585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11911721260288667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10360810626591103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658017394263764,0.16471509181900645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805888421774928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806903969239072,0.0,0.06551746665698784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138171938808649,0.0,0.2450789350637971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563733267867107,0.0,0.11352963377978954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439968292166618,0.0,0.0,0.12004855341166686,0.06335602006835732,0.0,0.0,0.12206708459845594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126420090637872,0.0,0.1017961947906452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557598872632594,0.0,0.0,0.23235445790018056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548020669578485,0.0,0.11134015788764626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845027231443937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18372979526031752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833540554568442,0.0953625335685924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963809866311641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386810639321373,0.11326406505145092,0.0,0.06722191194022717,0.0,0.1092739387922202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799636170429195,0.0,0.3698893455832486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12870833305332596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357069290392051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IAmAMess56778,2020/03/13,"I think I may have Histrionic Personality Disorder? Or maybe Borderline? I already posted this on r/personalitydisorders and got some helpful answers but I wanna get more opinions since this is a bigger sub. 

So, first of all, I’m an (almost) 17 year old male and I think I might have HPD. But I don’t even know if I can have HPD since I’m a male. I’m also gay if that changes anything.

I’m going to list the symptoms and explain to you if I have them or not.

Be uncomfortable unless he or she is the center of attention: I LOVE when people pay attention to me, but it’s not that I feel *uncomfortable* when people don’t. 

Dress provocatively and/or exhibit inappropriately seductive or flirtatious behavior: I don’t dress provocatively but I can be flirtatious. I’m not like, an extremely sexual person though.

Shifts emotions rapidly: sort of


Act very dramatically, as though performing before an audience, with exaggerated emotions and expressions, yet appears to lack sincerity: MAJOR YES, I do this literally all the time. All. The. Time.


Be overly concerned with physical appearance: yes absolutely


Constantly seek reassurance or approval: yup


Be gullible and easily influenced by others: yup


Be excessively sensitive to criticism or disapproval: extremely

Have a low tolerance for frustration and be easily bored by routine, often beginning projects without finishing them or skipping from one event to another: YUP. Like, this REALLY sounds like me.


Not think before acting: I don’t think before I say things a lot, and I don’t think before acting on other things as well

Make rash decisions: yup 

Be self-centered and rarely show concern for others: yuppp


Have difficulty maintaining relationships, often seeming fake or shallow in their dealings with others: yes. I have friends but only a few of them have been consistent over the years


Threaten or attempt suicide to get attention: never done this

Other symptoms that I’ve read about that weren’t on this list is that my personality and opinions change depending on who I’m with, because I want people to like and approve of me. Another is, I state extremely unsubstantiated opinions ALL THE TIME. I really have no set opinions on much of anything. I often say crazy things that will get a reaction out of people. I used to post pro-Trump stuff on my snapchat story just to get people riled up even though I didn’t support him. I don’t know anything about politics. 

Also, I think my dad has some sort of personality disorder, though not diagnosed. But he shows symptoms of many personality disorders, such as HPD, BPD and NPD.",4.669297101449279,7.711762284782612,5.796195652173914,70.57574275362322,75.06521739130434,9.398550724637682,30.88768115942029,9.725611199111238,3.851028985507247,2081,98,328,64,48,688,230,460,0.13,0.7509999999999999,0.12,-0.6141,1,0,0,0,0,1,65.0,0,1,4,5,20,14,1,0,15,7,37,7,1,6,5,89,68,42,1,6,26,1,1,4,1,3,4,3,0,7,23,16,0,0,16,3,1,6,16,4,1,2,5,4,39,10,47,53,12,39,0,1,0,2,28,14,0,31,19,228,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490791419079254,0.0,0.08255084419127592,0.11964547836577953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568822968962959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18467815190918074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04560135429112768,0.0,0.25461932169342805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421618087527156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582707376120476,0.0,0.0,0.08083926203035835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712222727696638,0.0,0.07592703319188145,0.0,0.0,0.2572042248759493,0.0,0.0,0.076553032203776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682945105958581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881798894481998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0378244192430271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06363037936417211,0.0,0.0,0.05779532421765087,0.0,0.15633325622592184,0.0,0.042514263665352166,0.0,0.05982959991449729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0501412269358457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222340329717873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461867290505828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359781986889411,0.06751579609981267,0.0,0.0499339264429066,0.07584206000029503,0.07515319417777823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07935788575112948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05499139234695257,0.0,0.05769539234400881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849684864909172,0.0,0.05069082732159124,0.056893721920212185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593070757853079,0.32659079644043193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14328791669120838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482675390755555,0.0,0.09584593193305936,0.0,0.0,0.08031419640363455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897827885457588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810103735322877,0.07803950483590923,0.0,0.0,0.1237614365389606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563555688224457,0.08182618057471193,0.08488954128167693,0.0,0.2332578210078661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909436416272867,0.287597947103447,0.293988065846157,0.0,0.1308608330330378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460880646668031,0.0,0.0617232052894104,0.044122817887870806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726003657365758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211080635963042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634587988654973
mentalhealth,anonymous737379292,2020/03/13,"I feel unemployable Hello Reddit 

So I finished college over a year ago and have been unable to find work in my field of study so I decided to start applying to some blue collar jobs for work experience and to try and get my foot in the door with come companys, but I can't even get unskilled labour jobs. This is really starting to effect we as I have applied to probably over a hundred jobs on the past 15 month and I keep getting told my application is not being taken forward, you can only be told this so many times before it start so brake you and make you feel unemployable.

I need some help to get me out of this low point, at this point I still have faith in the kind people of reddit to pick me up so please help me <3

Sorry for the lack of details I want to stay anonymous.",6.8506874999999985,5.541003693750002,7.255000000000003,78.67000000000004,65.1875,10.25,31.25,9.188382445141503,2.380125,621,18,129,9,8,204,100,160,0.045,0.831,0.125,0.9368,7,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,3,0,3,7,3,0,0,6,0,10,1,1,3,0,25,27,12,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,9,0,2,5,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,4,3,19,2,26,21,3,25,1,1,1,0,9,13,0,2,11,83,24,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760224963161887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249013730255072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399945976489267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507706605539484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080990533024426,0.0,0.0,0.1455700463155296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13156692921364244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008299903198159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192972182347892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4285420044813857,0.1279486321720349,0.0,0.1499009041524277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096087185612905,0.1459418598864991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148988503772318,0.0,0.0,0.10673648208733247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947982679886004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374157664543557,0.09979622632003927,0.0,0.0,0.15801295636248702,0.2721569793573253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552015469320783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221752131212592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113930524746414,0.30566388027805874,0.15343065715044615,0.11495798934520875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393791588758649,0.0,0.0,0.2750991924760699,0.0,0.09773203415874812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490494728075831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20959341351097505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092698542886293
mentalhealth,NoaRanger,2020/03/13,"I think there is something wrong with me I think there is something wrong with me, with the way the things are proceeding now with Coronavirus, I know that there is a chance that I won't be able to see my grandparents back home in my country as I'm away in another country,  


Even worst, with my younger brother's health condition there is likeliness of higher risk than my grandparents... But I don't feel scared or anxious for their safety or to see them.  


Recently had a argument with a long time friend who I also work with, the argument started work related and ended up personal. The things got heated up and he pointed and said that ""how many of the people you know think and speak good of you, have they said anything good about you? Our boss? even your other friends ask me how I'm  are tolerating you"" (translating)..  



This statement really got me thinking about what I meant for the people around me.. I always thought that I was a good friend even though I have only a handful of friends. I know I can be hard sometimes, arrogant because I have different perceptions of life and understanding. His words really made me sad and shut out... Because I thought friendship is the only thing I got anymore..  


But now I don't know anymore...  


In a country where I don't know the native language, can't speak to people, unable to make new acquaintances, shut in my house and room for the next few weeks, feeling like nothing else matters anymore,

No, I don't have suicidal thoughts but I wouldn't dismiss that it kind of feels better if it were to all to end.

I feel like crying and I hear this voice telling me ""Men don't cry"" (translating),  I get shaken, get off of my bed to do pushups at aprox. 23:00 (time before I made this post)


Now, the only thoughts I get are only of self preservation... the only things that come up in my mind are how to survive this, evrything and live through.. but not to make amends with my friend or try to change.  


I realised that something is wrong with me.  


Previously when this happened I messaged to my other friend (the one I share my intimate secrets with) about these thoughts as ""I have some scary thoughts"" (translating). 


and he said these are just thoughts every adult goes through once in a while and as I grow I'll be able to manage these as the process of ""growing up""..  


And after that I'm here again with the same kind of thoughts after several previous times it came again and again and I try to shoo it away as ""growing up""..  


I think that something is very wrong with me and if I proceed the way the things are I might end up losing even the ones I got if I continue to distant myself.
I want to stop doing this. Please help :(",5.262944596443226,6.099507284883725,5.0788235294117685,85.68088235294121,68.20542635658914,8.396169630642955,30.874145006839942,8.4952907291091,2.16186634746922,2093,81,420,30,34,645,230,516,0.094,0.7909999999999999,0.115,0.847,3,0,4,0,0,0,77.0,1,5,3,5,28,24,0,2,24,0,36,3,1,8,1,88,86,37,1,5,12,1,6,2,6,3,2,7,3,4,31,31,0,1,27,0,0,5,10,9,0,2,22,15,66,15,71,58,5,58,0,2,2,0,36,23,0,8,29,287,97,4,0.11920484058553453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04766403397436463,0.04959398833392213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624983345077262,0.0,0.06733376977638719,0.17732875584700197,0.0,0.0,0.04904771344561299,0.05305879050747347,0.05572021723841846,0.0,0.11199687171350728,0.04583058216729593,0.0,0.0726661644016132,0.0,0.05071726974346056,0.0,0.0,0.052713497209643086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816929054898656,0.0,0.0,0.06305145767084866,0.051342207523254094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13094091995512028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06227184347744132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04979017413908042,0.0,0.15837016033136864,0.0,0.0,0.15746734591823705,0.0,0.050217609727964886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205470982094984,0.08515996193255923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762920924079752,0.0,0.09341941381137844,0.0,0.0,0.14997504697168754,0.1906780011713592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05270622342487827,0.0,0.05339206147388407,0.0,0.0,0.06335458563638681,0.06717625944191101,0.0,0.03995024595714325,0.0,0.059786087237951535,0.0,0.0,0.0687731906437234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12413349773474355,0.16377965727476818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042098952105758966,0.05823746384101657,0.0,0.052630029085473415,0.05274626638031259,0.0,0.06667986259893875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279450241449827,0.07957015673160138,0.06042749920708732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322874903824935,0.06018145375558553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057564388924943664,0.06338785015607372,0.0,0.0,0.057190129757074784,0.0,0.0,0.06347463239923098,0.08077628502628066,0.22665163210285266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396244075923996,0.052042534427122485,0.0,0.06542555921056213,0.056343552381435125,0.0,0.057082643009759425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636567329348598,0.0,0.05885019954954687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17008665154599897,0.0,0.0596724204393482,0.0,0.094990824443933,0.0,0.062178323170217785,0.06733376977638719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18353942020866765,0.05894831769948745,0.0,0.042186899855194346,0.0,0.0,0.04983029218446722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519537393602119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05209514241889448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19798599818687745,0.19095412141677373,0.058559075319627,0.3785413124600409,0.10426395174803953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093226194633568,0.0,0.0,0.0620482215170186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04917823881194981,0.035155051734135384,0.09461925392818628,0.047809466396287366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867825436690684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606635601818099,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,demirebel,2020/03/13,"Anger 'blackouts' or something else? A lil explanation to my question; there are a lot of times I've 'blackedout' and find myself in a place I don't remember going to, with people telling me I've said and done things I don't remember. 

One example I was anxious at school and trying to get to class, and I felt relieved seeing the doorway and remember walking into class, but one of my friends would come in right after me and ask me why I flipped out on someone who bumped into me. No clue, I don't even remember being bumped into. I thought I had made it to class quickly without anything happening. Must of been an anger blackout, right?

Then there's times I do remember things. Like for an example a time one of my ex friends refused to  leave and I felt so helpless, but I remember it was like I was suddenly watching myself say things to him, like someone else was in control. When I looked in the mirror at myself I didn't really regonize myself. There was no yelling, and my voice sounded icy and different. My other friend told me right afterward that it terrified her because she said I didn't look or sound like myself at all, it was like I was possessed. I just told her I must've blackedout again, because I didn't want to explain how I felt like I was backseat driving, watching myself do and say things without my control and her think I acted that way on purpose. 

I've looked into anger blackouts but none really explain the 'backseat driving' and not even remembering what led me to be angry to begin with. 

I don't have ADD or ADHD or Bipolar or anything like that. Just regular anxiety. 

Sorry if that's too thick/heavy a question, I'm just looking for some insight to this situation.",4.6989090909090905,6.083511996969698,5.3985606060606095,80.84784090909092,69.93939393939394,8.045454545454545,33.14393939393939,8.472884824447931,2.7232121212121214,1349,64,247,21,24,437,156,330,0.128,0.763,0.10800000000000001,-0.7134,1,0,1,0,1,0,30.0,0,0,0,2,14,15,3,0,10,0,26,1,0,5,2,66,51,25,0,4,15,1,3,7,3,2,1,8,0,0,16,21,0,3,18,0,0,7,13,4,0,3,23,18,46,11,36,24,4,37,0,1,7,0,23,18,0,10,18,180,62,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895584545058619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700752978926993,0.08418629090413457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264707845788933,0.0,0.06966605959020702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085329509275716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419230695930643,0.0,0.0,0.1671608388940723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785744875919667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625974418053857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450365093653447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843939998754946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146524094719332,0.0,0.06810985081538742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727217007395799,0.0,0.03893357906112874,0.0,0.04235138410342161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589771332335449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890582847593493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548466588239886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503118357810818,0.0,0.0,0.06335416552451872,0.0,0.07051254388540162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148986575297516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05166272502688851,0.0,0.07785744875919667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669587154068684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547872944476117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5909157457382943,0.1909187966487364,0.14177100508421814,0.11852245230912226,0.0,0.07541813080000555,0.05938272286267347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376350493568789,0.0,0.0,0.1262809616133798,0.05736907005718276,0.0,0.08341894202819107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0651336889191575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19803087685313006,0.047749351531401786,0.0,0.05916048729305193,0.1303594823492752,0.0,0.0,0.14241394148945294,0.0,0.0505941295903291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04395377567405552,0.05915043864901714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724263102215962,0.0,0.0,0.1436690745573504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05293680840624719,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,neurotransmission455,2020/03/13,"How do I deal better with mental issues stemming from abuse? Hi everyone. I am in need of some advice on how to deal with mental issues from abuse. I grew up in an abusive household and my relationship with my family is pretty nonexisitent now since moving into an apartment with my boyfriend. He tells me all the time I think like a child and act like one. When it comes to fights, Ill admit I still slam doors and have in the past ran out of the apartment a couple times. However, that is the only time Id say I can be immature, and I havent ran out like that in a long time. Like any one else, I can think for myself and make my own decisions but he makes me feel like im actually retarded or have some mental illness.  I am trying to cope better but when he resorts to degrading me saying im a child who cant think properly and a fucked up retard, I dont know what to think. He tells me my judgment makes zero sense but I feel the same way about him sometimes. He tells me im a retard bc of how I grew up and theres a reason I have little to no friends. Ive never had this issue with anyone else before, but I also havent been close to someone the way I am with him. I am NOT perfect and I have regrets on my behavior during intense fights. 

Because I grew up in a fucked up environment, I always doubt myself and wonder if I have something wrong with me. Im not a mean person and I try everyday to be the best person I can be. I have zero confidence, like none. But i know Im a good person and treat everyone around me with the same respect Id want. I cant tell if my boyfriend is accurate with his judgment or if his judgment is off. For example, he told me I have daddy issues because I seek older friends instead of friends my own age? I dont see how that has to do with my dad, and I havent thought about my dad nor mentioned him for months. Its not my fault he was a shitbag my whole life ya know? Has anyone else that grew up with abuse had this problem of not knowing whether something was wrong with you or not? I question myself at least 10 times a day but never express this to my boyfriend since Im afraid he'll judge me. Id really like to know how you learned to deal with past abuse and what you did to overcome your mental problems since then. Thank you.",2.7612264150943417,3.8954493522012617,4.1481498951781965,88.9220990566038,74.34591194968553,6.893291404612159,24.780398322851163,7.2793139503082624,0.9536285115303982,1779,55,387,19,36,589,201,477,0.175,0.696,0.129,-0.987,1,0,2,0,6,0,35.0,0,6,0,4,15,31,4,2,22,0,39,5,0,9,4,91,68,36,0,8,18,2,2,7,3,1,3,2,1,5,12,32,0,0,19,0,0,9,17,13,0,4,10,5,67,18,57,54,11,54,0,1,1,2,48,23,2,11,27,259,79,1,0.0,0.3567829955663238,0.05877076598155963,0.0,0.0,0.05885102632428647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816179072130637,0.05011189964445528,0.0,0.0,0.040954963142784614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422123072125773,0.12341495157030385,0.0,0.053612884837254016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342501904712502,0.0,0.05124691151097963,0.0,0.06320226441165491,0.10652797126506076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0518783755322675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663765094003468,0.0,0.03884004592000562,0.1862675274055308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411661511467632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509304026692439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509484995302993,0.0,0.0,0.056774628628921325,0.0,0.06090298734627843,0.0430246448153784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958870895885098,0.11135380659898064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0505137467631137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.390319035289658,0.2514363856313593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16549001249699227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042538592557951685,0.2059597371690625,0.060361121254253115,0.0,0.05329709701250178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060166492297035,0.0,0.0,0.06560251708115435,0.0,0.0,0.2427699347285072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04807090062648392,0.0640094844357221,0.0,0.04465596310837741,0.09289823400298493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161983387248921,0.04580371219880838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498286766232832,0.0,0.15775804790464334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06127032359164065,0.0,0.11525409565701465,0.0,0.0,0.06746561501328603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03858158100330568,0.06192117615096315,0.0,0.06465895029173244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578643580757737,0.0,0.0,0.04799140804756065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945585459740554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051028319899048206,0.09272806357466508,0.05956391651497098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04809564294064493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21055669338645325,0.05544695034132522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15435860822005762,0.0,0.047811803654393054,0.17558797151489602,0.0,0.0,0.057547424976514966,0.0,0.08177743966357864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03552217685407725,0.09560736525881096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723889418079168,0.0,0.0,0.06531128071667884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13169283826143385,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InevitableTwo4,2020/03/13,"The problem is me After living abroad for nearly a decade in Germany and moving back to the UK because I felt isolated and couldn't make friends... Well let me give you some context. So I landed a job pretty quickly and thought I was so set, so ready for this. I would be perfect, I did my best to be well groomed (look I'm posting on mental health, just getting out of fucking bed is hard) I resolved to be unfailingly polite, I never once said anything even vaguely controversial, I even smiled and agreed with political views that I absolutely can't stand. I did fucking everything, even if no-one liked me at least I wasn't going to give anyone any justification to hate me. A month into my new job, I eat lunch alone every day, no one talks to me unless I make the effort, the two coworkers I was supposed to work closely with as copywriters have frozen me out to the extent that it's impeding my ability to do my job properly.

I want to just not give a fuck, and I swing between not letting it get to me to being unable to sleep over it all. All I want is just one to two fucking people that will just treat me like a normal person and just shoot the shit about whatever is in the news, video games, whatever.

The end result is that the problem has just got to be me. Everyone else manages to make acquaintances and friends, I get people who actively dislike me or who, even worse, just tolerate me out of pity. I would say there's plenty of evidence that my colleagues are just cunts, but if people are jerks everywhere I go then the problem just be me right? I'm self aware, it really fucking hurts, and it's been like this since I was a teenager. I'm fucking 30 now. I'm not a perfect guy but I try to listen, be attentive, do good work, be the best copywriter I can be, all I get in return is contempt and I just fucking hate myself for it.

Back to YouTube, video games and dreading Monday. I'd leave a positive message or something but as it makes no difference, fuck it.",5.011898734177215,5.4738448734177245,5.8671898734177255,81.13926582278482,68.62025316455697,8.851645569620256,31.243037974683546,8.841846274778883,2.4363549367088613,1555,61,309,25,25,512,202,395,0.127,0.728,0.14400000000000002,0.7187,3,1,1,1,0,0,45.0,0,1,0,8,25,34,14,1,19,0,36,13,2,6,6,65,71,24,0,11,21,0,2,3,2,3,1,3,1,3,17,17,2,0,5,4,0,3,9,20,2,4,11,7,44,14,43,45,8,33,0,2,2,8,18,14,10,5,16,218,61,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819199545476979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05134046496247596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0527891714841297,0.0,0.06212749666229605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610487586896633,0.0,0.046022195217409065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584586283358617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048689239683721165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788781673194553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725215254199043,0.06306795282252935,0.0,0.06686782397650824,0.0,0.0,0.19945989977298165,0.0,0.06360937465968007,0.07214050090551727,0.06785172459000563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724888409937416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665739911218775,0.5583651667517611,0.15777600794637905,0.2172704500535191,0.08581322955629499,0.06332319813775547,0.060381748960034766,0.0,0.0,0.07475377740147048,0.0,0.0,0.06763037230451226,0.1490750708828007,0.0,0.08024964939558925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082096782647688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22475700189509515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994029139401837,0.0,0.15440134271538689,0.0,0.11065188118551217,0.0,0.06666512517387807,0.0,0.06339836194044303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20157900540022436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608309452274148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060260886592043414,0.08024123184975476,0.0,0.0,0.058227845441809575,0.07291535383738525,0.0,0.0,0.07397090952912576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040170959032579,0.10231727487006416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702008480088692,0.06592096056636207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230513848512685,0.07680746508376206,0.0,0.21672094439071526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04836523233561052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447392007866708,0.07181481822418047,0.06003814646730767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875970751436509,0.0,0.07749645887480308,0.0624517964578435,0.0,0.07555139950645279,0.0,0.0,0.058121184023481036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606815296121677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059936086909740234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05125742344256798,0.0,0.14749895655775824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906002770943422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576151768480274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099252506057008,0.0,0.07693776709844216,0.10726163000127044,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,natalie_is_fren,2020/03/13,"Covid19 related episode All of this Corona Virus stuff has sent me into a depressive episode. I don't know what to do anymore. I am 4 months clean and trying very hard. Send prayers, hope, or whatever",2.0776315789473685,4.908667289473687,2.27926315789474,92.2578421052632,86.63157894736841,6.197894736842105,28.65263157894737,7.554174236665415,1.9862463157894743,159,8,31,3,5,48,35,38,0.11,0.746,0.14400000000000002,0.3197,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,6,7,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,1,3,6,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,1,17,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773899786077192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32775555052773303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3408859805259576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3779586312339482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20913292170830727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037406229378645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4356232774304601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25835932073211737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139824853204284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Burgundyhustle,2020/03/13,"I just want this pain to stop dear god (tdlr) I am 24 and I'm diagnosed only by my GP for anxiety.

I am so goddamn sad. I go through periods of euphoric happiness and stuff seeming great but my mind still feels confused and frazzled

Then there are my lows and it hurts me physically in my chest it's so bad. I get so deoressed I bawl and the suicidal thoughts over run me. I've developed a drinking problem just a bit but this started way before my drinking ever did. It's been there my whole life but like trauma and abuse and death and dysfunctional family life have added on it.

And lately I feel I'm in such agony I cry all the time 
. I'm so sad life has little meaning I'll never get ahead or matter. Nothing ever feels right I dont feel happy but the pain in my chest from sadness hurts so bad. 

I tru telling people or conveying how i feel but i dont think they get it. Like irs a pain thats enough to make me want to cut my throat in front of them. Or hang myself.

I think about cutting my throat or hanging myself quite often. Even if I get happy it's this overwhelming thought in my mind. 

It's like I'd be happy if I could just escape this body and die.",1.0219591836734665,3.0915305428571433,2.77730612244898,92.60555102040821,82.34693877551021,5.879183673469387,21.63673469387755,7.087006719466742,0.5504579591836736,913,29,202,12,25,302,137,245,0.35200000000000004,0.563,0.085,-0.9983,0,0,2,0,1,2,17.0,0,0,2,2,18,26,2,2,6,0,11,14,5,2,4,51,34,28,3,6,14,0,5,3,0,0,7,0,0,0,13,10,2,1,11,2,0,5,3,17,0,0,4,5,32,9,18,28,4,27,0,7,0,0,3,10,0,9,14,123,45,0,0.0,0.11520913350446935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438551510472365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16237652352796667,0.0,0.0,0.08274094258035684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615687239083947,0.10800762600943252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763528562587017,0.0,0.10680952655996094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986928132844596,0.1009159437117898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22792047485284697,0.19050914160651025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004711066748501,0.0,0.0642236692393225,0.17591162825877704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166574431320036,0.0,0.2458280133579845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20320784598371794,0.0,0.05526163883220884,0.0,0.0,0.10720338096137527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4140394632207733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081869733694787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968679904454877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20604265547978928,0.14251425627016728,0.09745633288972114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490599555675332,0.0,0.0,0.10591885323227178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963619191167265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499464083616729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330086706813348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395259946927381,0.3103988856466515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741141787838226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304202175056804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342279044253336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303928202927383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852028956530958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688243644860629,0.0,0.07765304705366771,0.08129391359693652,0.0,0.0,0.111312317505299,0.10636074691384116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498882549080906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461020930776713,0.0,0.15438954599181498,0.0566992774415397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147049962135875,0.07718166115672774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856087359308696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hafwen,2020/03/13,"I have just posted this to n facebook, will probably regret it, what do u think? I have been thinking a lot about the Corona virus and ""regular"" peoples reaction to it. As a person who has suffered from severe (but at the moment controlled OCD, through medication) since I was seven years old, it has been fascinating and obviously scary to see the reactions. I  am in a pretty good place with my ""cleaniness/contamination"" OCD the past couple of years, but obv. Being a teacher in the middle of a pandemic is testing at the best of times. The support groups that I am in on the internet with people all over the world is also showing me that this is a very difficult time for many who suffer from for example OCD. Studies have shown that OCD is a serious but unusual psychiatric illness, in the fact that the effects are so serious even though the people who suffer themselves nearly always know their compulsions are illogical. When a pandemic like this happens all the logical basis to control the OCD and compulsions fly out the window. I am as mentioned at the moment fine and my job means I have a large incentive/duty to stay calm and carry on, also I  am stable at the moment with my OCD. But please I am asking people to try and be supportive to those around you, who at the moment are living their worst nightmare (it does not matter if you believe it or not). Mentally support and do not ridicule other people around you who have been living a pandemic nightmare for years in the way they live and have just had it confirmed in ""real life"".",9.670555114988105,7.7304059312714815,9.562680412371133,66.3723473433783,60.1340206185567,12.52772931535818,39.223103357123975,11.20814326018867,4.431968860692575,1230,49,209,26,13,405,158,291,0.10800000000000001,0.767,0.124,0.7244,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,3,3,4,11,17,1,0,29,0,30,3,0,3,4,41,40,21,0,2,11,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,1,21,14,0,2,6,1,0,0,3,9,0,1,5,1,19,8,40,32,5,36,0,4,1,0,15,21,0,3,13,170,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18005084473008715,0.09367062277879512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004295325982147,0.10524153481970304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12683239768759494,0.11813951397719255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525227255631124,0.0,0.12456103856281706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851430458234736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435409439230475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442176712043182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995488553831384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11171236827225182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06186775055125674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951437653147597,0.05499799159441958,0.0,0.29821483007832833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570642657617913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413241148466785,0.0,0.12262613619614003,0.0,0.11340650600304578,0.11344815871744182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812752225128093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746466307642563,0.3902233387951169,0.09829531309223348,0.11761591588159885,0.1235724950298552,0.0,0.0,0.10781481587207804,0.11452827391113103,0.12137385964030464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813390773805222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970693810733807,0.0,0.0,0.12717662686314135,0.0,0.0931224125567219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11998895251764348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3832430734186556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426580378938667,0.1106034267219426,0.0,0.1312856607788606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764303863642328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928853760593556,0.0,0.08935603628651774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21748198047405293
mentalhealth,MountainTroll07,2020/03/13,"Question: How do I mentally and emotionally reset? I recently put my two weeks at a job where my boss was verbally abusive. I worked there for almost 3 years, but I consistently felt on edge, stressed, and overwhelmed. Luckily I was offered a great job at another company and will be starting there soon. I guess I thought that putting in my two weeks at my old job would give me some sense of relief, but I'm still stressed out.    


My question is: Why can't I seem to shake this uneasy overwhelming feeling? Does anyone have any advice on how I can decompress and reset?",5.909285714285716,6.7808810925925975,6.160476190476192,78.37500000000001,66.77777777777777,9.875132275132275,34.87301587301587,9.957137785484203,3.4749349206349205,450,21,84,10,7,144,77,108,0.11,0.722,0.16899999999999998,0.7793,3,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,5,2,0,10,0,0,3,0,20,18,8,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,6,0,0,3,1,5,0,2,4,2,15,2,10,11,1,19,0,2,0,0,4,8,0,6,8,55,17,5,0.0,0.16842687815030186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13890929168313187,0.0,0.0,0.14234469673624214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666823633159397,0.14905876913158828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939598537930323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439817537401135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15990186972851456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187632367735815,0.0,0.13648821485562976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636515387356596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15672308464833207,0.1565964571636061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.423191784341171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325578405919995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491646141320417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858040504118758,0.3184855517326801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14035795316944605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294098442626291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061591905485848,0.0,0.11352277285897973,0.0,0.325669277271403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285281148926912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777237019884842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22805152393261424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12827007196875287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348835087613817,0.0,0.0,0.10098070406893676,0.0,0.0,0.09154122900356404
mentalhealth,shn_ike,2020/03/13,"I guess I know now, what it feels like to be sad for no reason. I've done several psychological tests and they all asked me the same question, if I'm often sad for no reason.

It seems like it is linked to depression, which makes me wonder since I overcame depression few years ago and never felt that before.

But today I realised, that this sadness without reason is something I always felt for about a year. I guess I didn't know how to describe it.

Almost everyday, on a random time without reason, I'm suddenly sad and anxious. All my emotions quickly shuts down, it feels like it's a moment where all the pain and problems I pretended not to exist is being remembered at once. Maybe it's just a habit of my mind to be sad. I'm not sure. I didn't even feel anxiety that much, when I had depression. But now I do.

If you have ever been sad for no reason, how would you describe? Let me know :)",3.8097435897435896,4.928424111111114,5.018888888888891,83.74115384615386,71.7777777777778,7.7606837606837615,26.62393162393163,8.139509932561175,1.6290213675213678,700,23,140,10,13,232,104,180,0.23800000000000002,0.701,0.061,-0.9867,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,1,0,12,15,0,0,6,0,15,1,0,8,6,49,32,11,0,4,9,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,13,4,0,0,18,1,0,0,10,11,0,0,7,5,19,4,16,20,6,19,0,9,0,0,5,5,0,10,17,100,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712213690070244,0.0,0.10971281504219764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116627056013367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381638588313252,0.1237764672592203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242782585308856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323114536325784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831027005457949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212231382788443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232450850693297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236618360732293,0.09910717761858667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661969989680553,0.1565455086644851,0.21039781059975116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413948469452155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18064101374736094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203691497765814,0.0,0.16058274088135535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07313501777939907,0.0,0.11007206089941338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11062870481080307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08054236354929399,0.0,0.08450273882814002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668239852077406,0.0,0.0,0.11658413487458645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483823345732536,0.0,0.0,0.12273708551153666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5632517165017329,0.0,0.0,0.12411498809844755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974321933843093,0.0,0.1237764672592203,0.0,0.0906327171370142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434794721756837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032630515190472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638878215825261,0.0,0.10385414076566132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21123214138701302,0.11881780436763778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783133170654598,0.0,0.0,0.1411116277132984
mentalhealth,alex-gonzo08,2020/03/13,"Is avoiding exposure therapy cowardly? My therapist keeps on telling me to do exposure therapy, but I never do because what I'm afraid of is something I'm EXTREMEMELY afraid of. I would never do exposure therapy unless I was forced, and even of I was forced I'd still put up a fight. Am I being a coward/sissy for avoiding exposure therapy? Because my therapist sure is making me feel that way.",5.9148,7.00048288,7.724,66.40200000000003,66.86666666666667,12.4,39.0,11.979248473330829,5.6182,316,18,51,12,5,111,45,75,0.23399999999999999,0.728,0.038,-0.9372,0,2,1,0,1,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,4,2,0,11,0,0,1,3,12,16,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,1,9,1,8,12,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,38,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20005867509620445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083816273183495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297015864631524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14585305945266086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953309744643758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531166876713536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16495840487667252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126326515019886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310445775768892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465535154130147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14342418176458396,0.0,0.7506168429978829,0.3810483564151982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13024908315543385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656668855832955,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emilyyc,2020/03/13,"Stop Telling Me My Depression is just Normal Emotions Someone said to me, people shouldn't be diagnosed with depression and anxiety it just normal emotions. 

Its not normal to feel so low, you wish you werent here. To feel numb and then overwhelmed with emotion so quickly your left with whiplashed by your own mood. It not normal that the main range of emotions for you feel are depressed, anxious or numb. 

Its ignorant comments like these that make me question my sanity and set of my self loathing.",5.9803296703296684,8.027205274725276,4.910769230769231,83.00923076923078,67.68131868131869,7.837362637362638,33.879120879120876,8.418075326091056,2.8029956043956044,404,19,69,6,7,119,62,91,0.268,0.672,0.06,-0.9693,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,5,0,0,6,10,0,1,1,0,4,3,0,1,0,24,10,7,0,6,5,0,3,1,0,1,3,2,0,1,7,6,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,1,5,11,1,10,7,2,6,0,5,0,0,10,2,0,2,4,48,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017101329171336,0.15020119042715785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3435415760095062,0.13494642260655393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5982254592205031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20167797355327646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14445588549992694,0.0,0.0,0.0649550472625312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874842670514826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5210702834553397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217418556408302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893991371384369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647055419006714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870095480984584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265225346615387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115624790199682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162084409171798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15289157096629474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gamerpanda8,2020/03/13,I want to be free of these emotions in me Ever Since I was extremely young my parents have reinforced that since I am a male that I shouldn't show sadness or be angry because I I no reason to be. I have only realized that doing to this to myself is mentally damaging. I have so many emotions that have built up that I am afraid if I show to much of one emotion they will all come out. I know that I need to go see a therapist but I am too afraid to ask my parents due to the fact that they made me this way. I am doing this thing we’re I let out a little every month so that I don’t explode but it isn’t enough anymore. How do I go about helping myself.,2.484965034965036,3.059135573426577,4.427559440559438,88.78903146853148,74.38461538461539,7.398321678321679,25.48881118881119,7.554174236665415,1.1035823776223777,509,16,117,6,10,175,83,143,0.047,0.8909999999999999,0.062,0.2271,2,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,0,6,5,0,2,4,0,21,0,0,3,3,18,30,7,0,4,4,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,14,3,0,0,3,2,1,3,4,4,0,1,2,1,25,2,15,22,3,13,0,2,1,0,7,5,0,2,4,93,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590482116225981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14992832145012108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776268466735827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381482588369706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5411985047283362,0.0,0.16570952253027454,0.0,0.0,0.14506773584480667,0.13512226453704235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18228882089975185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749551266544884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.088137521064622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399358732013652,0.0,0.0,0.16073718032161086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517500402362695,0.0,0.16259436833818552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616195738427085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800923610538376,0.0,0.11789356331638805,0.11891551126679413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086737761192418,0.12197188180264745,0.0,0.0,0.3561533619992961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16489149058016034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779755327499365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26532655624860996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18620692301056296,0.10654555868572124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459291722497043,0.1272976544367687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,michander1290,2020/03/13,How do you tell your friends you’re depressed without them acting completely different around you? I have great friends but I need to tell someone about my mental health but I don’t know how to do it in a way that keeps our relationship the same.,4.096875000000002,6.110471604166667,3.84,88.905,72.54166666666666,7.300000000000002,28.66666666666667,8.07648339933343,1.7774416666666673,199,8,40,3,4,60,37,48,0.046,0.812,0.142,0.5423,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,3,1,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,2,0,10,7,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,9,3,6,7,1,4,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,0,0,28,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21218778645374411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24991221639151595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20529607219769228,0.0,0.0,0.24903177210590904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3683072238800468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627888417798907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25336177397382625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21186217601152588,0.0,0.0,0.13099447843007653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24020725252862696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767382970099466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25590563869996913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019586574887836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4166681090591687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18919626564139908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297671244307677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bintruck,2020/03/13,"I wish death was easy I've told them I struggle every day to stay. I found a way to get out of the promise I made to the person I'm the closest to that I wouldn't end it. I want to die. Leave this fucking planet. All the overdoses and they never worked. I should be dead 20 times over but I always wake up the next day

They will be hurt by me leaving. They will feel guilt and pain because I need to be selfish but it hurts so much and I'm too tired. Every day is the same destructive fight. 

My brain destroyed me today and the day before and the day before. I fight it. But why

I said so much shit to my closest friend tonight. I want her to hate me so she won't hate herself for me leaving

I'm trapped

If I go, I know she might follow. She says she would. I don't want that. I don't want her to hurt. But she is hurting too. I beg her not to end shit but all I want is to be able to end shit and have her be okay with me being gone

I bring everyone down. I ruin lives. I've ruined so much

I research toxicity of drugs. People survive 100 paracetamol. People apparently survive 3.5g of MDMA. I can OD on fentanyl but I can't get it. I can bleed myself out but what if my veins clot up and I wake up tomorrow? I can hang myself but what if I fuck up the knot and I end up broken but not gone?

How is it so hard to die? 

I heard that a syringe of air into my vein will cause death

Don't fucking reply to me. I won't reply. I've already made peace enough with the people I care for.

I just want to go",-1.2405891005884015,0.7517726897590364,1.3181507425049048,99.36391846455594,93.18674698795179,3.93174558699916,16.154665172317177,5.434040548090677,-0.8696026337909779,1151,28,283,7,43,391,152,332,0.33,0.616,0.054000000000000006,-0.9988,1,1,1,0,2,3,30.0,0,0,4,3,9,26,12,2,12,1,28,15,8,4,3,51,61,26,6,14,15,0,2,0,1,9,4,3,0,1,11,13,0,0,3,0,0,7,10,22,0,0,9,5,58,4,35,37,7,38,0,6,0,3,22,14,6,4,15,183,69,2,0.08439604712080462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313313663846502,0.0,0.0702242720308833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05144704698905399,0.0,0.14362964007443418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421390003538696,0.0,0.0,0.08604739474134954,0.08669798835418911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721423424107077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17517954498789226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787262068850433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989993907004145,0.08720367716124322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422146193418861,0.08064403973707238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04267317724176239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925359095412416,0.065204176652087,0.2340683568701954,0.08818690260446567,0.0,0.09592843697284477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07560228114719075,0.1666472479283828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613908558535433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04638186035028482,0.0,0.0,0.26808968422116897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07452325581493104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971516079351036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953086899843858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861224161022967,0.06257859956164655,0.0650914343908343,0.0,0.08975615356525521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980334450028801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17552877786065882,0.07369137303859652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027996731221078,0.06711512407975861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598939886971611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995495697939587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08822907279705577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049212013771173735,0.09700084100529477,0.0799975844997509,0.08064403973707238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29867385130819457,0.066989653891854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761543055611299,0.0,0.09705128911699426,0.0,0.0,0.061441327456015736,0.0,0.0,0.05995253043373351,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,burner_socks,2020/03/13,"I met a girl, online so far. I can't be chill, relaxed. I met a girl in the past few months, under her rules of platonic texting only. I caught what felt like flirting, but text is flat and I didn't want to lose a friendship by misreading. 

We talked, we got along great. I explained to her my very complicated living situation, and she understood.

And then one night, I got to talking to her, and she was honest about wanting a little more out of our friendship, but not a relationship. I felt the same.

We made plans to meet, but those fell through. I'm hoping this weekend will go better. 

And... The meat of the post:

I can't calmly handle this. I'm thinking about her a dozen times a day. It's agony not to text her, but it's a different kind of agony when I do text her. Did I overstep? 

I don't do this with everyone I meet, but I do this with every person I click with. I can't stop.

I haven't told her that I love her or anything of the sort, and I'm not there yet. I've made the mistake in the past of confusing this desire with love. 

Obviously, I've scared people off in the past, and I'm so tired of doing that. I don't want to brag, but I have a really good heart and mind, it just works drastically different than other people's.

I've tried to write this post probably five times. I've tried to write her this in a message, but I can't find the words, and I imagine it's not a good thing to do.",2.217228809837504,3.36839143434344,3.828578539013325,90.61310935441372,75.73400673400674,7.050739276826234,22.67735324257063,7.586124646067393,0.6990777045820527,1084,29,251,14,23,362,142,297,0.094,0.716,0.19,0.9876,2,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,4,0,0,4,8,17,0,2,20,0,19,4,1,2,1,55,43,21,0,6,13,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,17,18,0,1,7,2,0,3,12,4,0,3,14,3,38,13,34,27,3,27,0,1,1,2,32,9,0,4,14,162,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841017016313824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576526133164894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712392450695182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24988658114644235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075747004995428,0.11427080360819435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22964515103187946,0.0,0.10930063875642336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796422660313363,0.20060833089360566,0.1912897994974617,0.1318454361877227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171154322701165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118777186342401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453178524384698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058424321174717964,0.1198579056357436,0.10559778946138848,0.0,0.0,0.13378761544292067,0.0,0.0,0.21586444029880972,0.2263128165676013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074909692414895,0.0,0.09545345333869762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222459339661636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810354591085779,0.09095154133016882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34247886923639964,0.1658135725665296,0.1044190301424172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290631802104752,0.0,0.1289353511330732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661069574392931,0.0,0.0,0.12839202124706453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972776378238754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442115177675756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998034951394724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19223950668261933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944849781058283,0.07662672227448382,0.0,0.0,0.13946464931925795,0.13744802577455956,0.0,0.11427080360819435,0.0,0.1623838729741835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867205848798452,0.21160708911046894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706098908293626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,altered_rain,2020/03/13,"Mental Health Treatment on the back burner So I’m supposed to start a new job on Monday. Today I’m pretty sure I had a sleep deprived psychosis. I’ve been sleeping less and less each day . I’m wondering if I’m developing bipolar. I had a rough 2020. Dumped by my ex of 10 years, stalked by an ex tinder date and developed high anxiety afterwards. This morning I’m pretty sure I experienced some sort of psychosis. I contacted the hospital and was advised not to go unless I have  Coronavirus symptoms. I’m totally fine now . I don’t have anything near me that can harm myself. I’ve been having a rough time with my roommates. I don’t think moving will be a good idea at this time. I totally ruined a social gathering not realizing how my anxiety is. When someone talks about it I get nervous. I’m going to start teletherapy through the VA next week, but I might stick to well. The guy just blew me off like mental health wont be important during a Pandemic.",3.1648904881101387,5.324636696808515,4.728260325406757,80.86029411764707,75.64893617021276,8.040550688360451,28.612015018773466,8.841846274778883,2.5479182728410508,761,33,141,17,17,255,123,188,0.083,0.82,0.09699999999999999,0.5286,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,8,11,1,1,12,0,17,6,2,1,4,23,31,9,0,1,6,2,2,1,0,3,4,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,3,5,5,1,0,5,3,16,6,17,21,6,25,0,2,0,0,8,6,0,5,17,86,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239196396971856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043623763264773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253659950659206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438572541520568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646352181647023,0.0,0.16635182587582048,0.12275414507738032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14491270665546274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3111332779776825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546302221336286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652149817336503,0.0,0.0,0.14523299743309254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150079526191196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949792650290071,0.1552576483066768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555503212937003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413488608685135,0.15564831973023185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977876983220908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929178477574272,0.14918868660190132,0.12400461627441205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20717913798688392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27587237324235697,0.1521170429212012,0.0,0.11763318197108068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377723986821666,0.0,0.0,0.17067948992389384,0.0,0.1387257487678646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117395732675248,0.0,0.1315891294810424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871383419412224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424668130734797
mentalhealth,Letsmakethisguap,2020/03/13,my mental health is declining and I just want help..urgently my mental health is deteriorating fast and I've waited too long to get help. I fucked up because I never took the step of talking to a therapist when I had the health insurance. I sent in my health insurance application 4 days ago and I'm still waiting to hear back. the wait is killing me. I really need to figure out what's wrong with me once and for all,3.185714285714288,4.973000428571432,4.823333333333334,81.85500000000002,74.47619047619048,8.609523809523811,25.095238095238088,9.23628265651192,2.0255666666666667,332,11,68,8,7,112,58,84,0.14400000000000002,0.8079999999999999,0.048,-0.872,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,2,0,4,0,4,5,0,0,2,15,15,5,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,6,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,3,1,11,0,10,12,1,14,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,0,8,41,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266672505992706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375563707564595,0.0,0.09810967965166324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379525977165804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878969641679676,0.08408634965809966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6843017684981083,0.18139505086900096,0.0,0.2157541059246256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17806016579873127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424299559501417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243864398589031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193375852524466,0.12412956913757815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713996026067226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310454397729507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285297077967108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12936030980049054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868678384564447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788141793134496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492866156279747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759664803894044,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nallahhh,2020/03/13,"Can you share your experiences with group therapy? Hi, I'm 19 yo and I had a therapist for 15 months. But I changed hospital in may so 10 months from now and I don't have one. A long time ago, my old therapist made a demand for psychology in public and this week they made a call. I did an evaluation through the phone and they told me I was a good candidate for group therapy. The thing is that I never did group therapy and I don't find much information on the internet. If you went or know someone that went can you tell me how it is like and if it was effective?",2.152457627118644,3.7661552627118695,4.212,85.88172881355933,76.88135593220339,9.126779661016947,25.359322033898305,9.642632912329526,2.189485423728815,443,16,101,13,10,152,76,118,0.013999999999999999,0.8859999999999999,0.1,0.8611,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,4,2,1,3,3,0,0,9,0,13,0,0,4,1,20,20,12,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,10,0,16,3,9,9,1,14,0,0,0,0,17,3,0,4,10,69,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013723063956895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16142754737229825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16723823921143693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546423377061739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444913797129749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325983765626925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688211982115199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723477988213373,0.0,0.0,0.13990465946831387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991771272760324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25237183109263306,0.0,0.11621432700253725,0.0,0.12192874023088622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16588884274867347,0.0,0.10712586335717708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339491289186336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13817761256347627,0.0,0.5423690170616992,0.3671093082972027,0.10502795953788284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218353996189037,0.0,0.0,0.15106175281421286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681024790090062,0.0,0.0,0.2931019947183578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,palmtreejokes,2020/03/13,"Is this normal? I don't know what's happening. All I did for an hour was sit blankly staring. I tried to eat lunch, but I spilled a little bit of it. I yelled my fair share of expletives. Then while walking to a table I felt happy. Then i felt angry, and now i feel sad.",-0.5585221674876841,1.5119261034482785,1.6793596059113334,97.78017241379312,89.6896551724138,4.693596059113301,18.630541871921178,6.1826913282559595,-0.24324926108374398,206,6,49,2,7,69,46,58,0.142,0.679,0.179,0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,1,8,9,5,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,2,0,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,4,5,9,2,5,5,2,8,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,5,31,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178893446528209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979462711990999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14722759686431386,0.0,0.5591502415648621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25748643409574856,0.30996281884387705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867502181375777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600229998994707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29183536681939753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28529116595721377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976897430487181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MystixTyler,2020/03/13,"Giving up. I've hit such a horrible spot that I'm convinced it's just. Time to give in to all the bad, and it's time to go. Nothing feels alright or frankly even neutral it's just. All bad. I've tried helplines and mental health resources in my area but it's all just for nothing.

It just feels like an ending of a book that wasn't good to begin with, and I don't need a sequel. I tried to tell some people and I just feel nothing, and I want people to get closure and not be shocked but no one wants to talk. All these strings in my existence are just getting torn on their own and now just. Nothing is left.",0.4587032967032982,2.542174123076922,1.7375824175824195,99.14384615384616,84.69230769230771,4.32967032967033,21.59340659340659,5.288315135182226,-0.2205054945054945,476,16,111,2,14,151,79,130,0.138,0.79,0.07200000000000001,-0.7663,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,10,7,0,0,5,1,5,1,0,0,4,30,19,10,0,3,11,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,3,0,1,1,3,7,4,15,16,6,13,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,2,6,69,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645248165002455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030071438532174,0.0,0.0,0.104625680802793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24028452652371576,0.11316529077667073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16552121268009226,0.30391497279806146,0.09002579039127638,0.132863452218986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16837818953594594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17210860184364507,0.0,0.0,0.07738917890644048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15963600846255624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745605505302215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6079793853022359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734001725009433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196375751477297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732075680483002,0.1384538415964766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847356457084953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21509457610194405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18686394692909306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EphemeralRabbit,2020/03/13,"Going to the mental hospital today I saw my psychiatrist yesterday and he wants me to go to the hospital he works at tonight to stay for \~ 3 days. My meds have apparently stopped working and I'm hearing a lot of loud voices, they don't really say anything bad, mostly just nonsense. At least I'll be able to see my psychiatrist while I'm there. I can't stay very long because i work full-time as a environmental scientist and can really only take the weekend off, but if let me bring my labtop i could work from there i guess, it's the slow season (winter) so I'm mostly writing reports'n'shit. Maybe he's just worried about me because I live alone and don't really have family in this city.

I'm not really sure why he wants me to go to the hospital, i'm not like freaking out or suicidal. I just hallucinate a metric fk ton. I've never been to a hospital before over-night, I'm kinda scared. They said I could bring my phone and some other stuff but can't bring a charge cord or stuff with string in it. Anyone have any tips for hospital stays? Try to act as sane as possible so they let you out early? I was thinking of dressing up like a wizard before I go.",3.8042591213700665,4.876830215189873,5.431025068255148,80.95559195830229,71.74261603375527,8.951998014395633,26.17746339041945,9.325443323948027,2.0957959295110453,919,29,187,20,17,313,137,237,0.129,0.857,0.013000000000000001,-0.9753,1,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,3,4,8,6,0,1,11,0,15,0,0,0,2,33,37,16,1,5,10,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,6,8,0,1,1,1,0,8,7,3,0,0,4,7,23,3,27,28,6,33,0,0,2,0,13,9,0,9,15,109,29,4,0.11317542236710648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172156056507864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696316816023269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913488677872113,0.0,0.09313372943718644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944967503359835,0.13798137403739216,0.0,0.19260789734134875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18072273118440227,0.0,0.0,0.07298878465769526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669171585305788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572808026394342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246754872473069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275569263468851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314590744796589,0.0,0.11058358931434137,0.0,0.09993597142001233,0.10015668737204272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621769690511052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369992357843575,0.0,0.12571238067721954,0.0,0.1140542066026166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728786277298857,0.0,0.0,0.10620746717816083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607500859003596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758828379922613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900122943627351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076557435820619,0.09000163839515879,0.11330834140153735,0.0,0.09018615875525417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617294468531413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618898253226967,0.0,0.09461972075885253,0.0,0.0,0.25911756325553553,0.12379554295525855,0.0,0.10666649620489037,0.0,0.08509383276496557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251824082957795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727706714922362,0.0,0.0,0.07683868275742947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933815761419382,0.13350759277240504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212321537545004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32957222158411353,0.11493513507953175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GeorgeKirkKing,2020/03/13,"To help a friend My friend recently got in to trouble with the law, which is extremely unlike him. We have been friends a long time and I have never had cause to suspect anything was the matter. He told me he has been struggling with his mental health due to relationship issues and pressures in day to day life and I am worried about him. He is drinking a lot and isolating himself. How can I help him?",2.5263607594936697,4.9457052278481015,3.3473259493670935,88.65238132911396,79.0,5.975316455696203,26.330696202531644,7.1686216300943375,1.323821518987342,319,13,62,4,8,101,55,79,0.135,0.687,0.177,0.5859,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,2,5,0,11,3,0,2,1,14,13,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,6,0,11,3,10,7,1,9,0,0,0,0,16,2,0,1,7,45,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697392456829726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118918791029168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660488595481373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20206203786755486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4780815257117208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496966837736635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21925098686612565,0.0,0.0,0.2765113452692972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152879909819862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14569169228243134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18253881453444587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17535987652079718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20786749454455114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590849638890344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20366267412056027,0.2214523641414457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21563388472291894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027529439105808,0.0,0.0,0.197095889336317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20947301529493698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,veelw,2020/03/13,"I don't understand anything Why am i here?
Why did i come to the world?
Why i was created?
Does god is real?
Do life has meaning or porpuse?
When i die i will be dead forever?
Do you ever live once?",-1.9283388704318905,-0.10622981395348853,1.6243189368770778,94.35813953488376,102.95348837209305,5.247840531561463,20.096345514950173,6.868970318607317,0.6502252491694356,150,6,35,3,7,54,34,43,0.20199999999999999,0.7070000000000001,0.091,-0.7941,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,10,1,0,0,1,6,13,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,7,0,1,9,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,23,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973522624887448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065845704941244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488963522515053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20986898764760156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21693183941913266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16939267629039628,0.0,0.0,0.21176635127718968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612353928876265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25540155564071604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729688202573459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496621358988491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6492034968028428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,extraanon,2020/03/13,"Safe Proofing and Supporting a Suicide Survivor I’m hoping this is a place to find support- My youngest sibling (16) who identifies as non-binary survived a suicide attempt very recently. They are currently voluntarily getting help at a mental wellness facility. 

The social worker, my family and my youngest sibling could not identify a specific trigger for the attempt- and so the social worker has decided that anywhere my sibling stays has to be safe proofed- my sibling has approved of the plan. 

The hardest thing is going to be pencil sharpeners- my sibling is an artist and even said in the hospital that loosing access to pencil sharpeners would be hard. All sharp objects have to be removed as they have a history of cutting.

Does anyone know of bladeless pencil sharpeners? 

Also, any other advice is appreciated.

TDLR- Sibling cannot have any sharp objects, looking for blade-less pencil sharpeners.",7.109151364764272,9.903032470967744,7.4832258064516175,62.64791563275438,66.2258064516129,9.672456575682382,41.60049627791564,10.035473477838034,5.377635235732011,743,46,93,19,13,242,98,155,0.069,0.7490000000000001,0.183,0.9571,1,0,0,0,0,2,20.0,0,0,2,7,4,7,1,0,13,0,18,0,0,1,3,17,27,8,2,3,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,2,3,1,0,2,2,1,1,0,1,5,8,6,14,20,1,8,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,1,2,69,14,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170133186418727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392315381875726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23679445591140064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12173811776670053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900850830535594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523602755770599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499457220879815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16413050170362306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591286244879826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096256720902783,0.0,0.0989477647779129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15596369476432692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166987712071648,0.0,0.0,0.17292534150088218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568343971248358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14620417474144032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17545667910035415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18190244992278773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190747661718928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16561352551247768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35495581708685925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855725414628442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3808847652596199,0.3951441064091504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566748665036115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14365468602229925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654111594711448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236790479735846,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blvnkst8,2020/03/13,"Looking for help to overcome ""learned helplessness"" Somewhere in the back of my head this phrase popped up from the days when I was a psychology undergrad.

I looked up ""learned helplessness"" and realized this describes much of what I've been struggling with, in trying to get a correct diagnosis and effective help since I was a teen (I'm in my 30s now).  Anyone know of some useful tools to overcome this as an adult?",8.564220779220781,8.090640974025973,7.701915584415584,74.13001623376627,61.337662337662344,11.336363636363638,40.02922077922078,10.686352973137794,4.249703896103896,333,16,60,7,4,103,54,77,0.109,0.752,0.138,0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,6,0,3,1,1,2,1,11,9,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,5,0,15,6,2,9,0,2,2,0,3,5,0,1,4,40,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083142370601652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22908390069050585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921352719241509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556521337507139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057542859572783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3993821481036389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373033449717475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5003594876444699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21900720968432252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464444499960289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114531304337562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022697223296724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573092591660157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beddyby12,2020/03/13,"Why the hell do I get so irrationally irritated/angry? I have anxiety and depression and I know irritability/anger/moodiness are all symptoms of that. Does anyone know why this happens though? Especially, when I forget to take my medication. It kind of makes me feel that without taking my medication daily I would be an absolute monster. The worst part about it is that I can absolutely recognize that I'm getting irritated over nothing but I just still continue to be angry. It just plain sucks.",4.7888264669163565,7.765651977528094,6.563295880149813,65.62024968789015,74.1685393258427,10.247690387016233,32.36079900124844,10.25414643259724,4.422130087390762,402,20,63,14,9,138,65,89,0.249,0.7509999999999999,0.0,-0.9632,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,2,0,3,0,8,3,0,1,1,13,19,6,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,10,1,7,16,3,4,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,48,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158695646046423,0.0,0.0,0.14505108836013772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17867296267997493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18153741983801355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489094641942387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21676397854264715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834438402696776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160231188165544,0.2280138271060691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847183665615484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4179601039649663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199050061765703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246438362976244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16566666846772338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156158560606589,0.31194719693748885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20381467237136774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37437555394415306,0.0,0.0,0.19997057132671825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14736370863145762,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anonymoose42069420,2020/03/13,"Suicidal thoughts I feel like I’m in the verge of suicide I have autism and feel like the slightest break in my routine could push me over the edge, I want to seek help for me partners sake because he’s struggling with this but I’ve made him quite aware that I’m terrified of being away from home and I’ve heard absolute horror stories of being sectioned by the NHS. The idea of not having my own bed or belongings is terrifying and I don’t know what to do to a point that if I did get sectioned I would kill myself because that would break my routine. I’m from England I don’t currently want to act on this but I feel like something that most would consider minor could change that in a heartbeat.",4.27781690140845,5.345136922535211,4.656450704225354,86.96988732394367,70.61971830985915,7.651830985915493,29.69295774647888,7.908726449838941,1.8143104225352111,561,22,115,7,10,177,86,142,0.195,0.731,0.07400000000000001,-0.976,1,0,1,0,0,2,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,1,1,7,0,14,0,0,1,0,24,27,7,3,8,5,0,3,3,1,3,0,1,2,1,8,4,0,0,6,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,4,4,15,3,19,16,4,15,0,0,0,0,5,10,0,3,4,75,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15754453186349415,0.0,0.0,0.20443708253303225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738731859359175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677638787734377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543580351534179,0.3593802076141367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760791017761163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239497498197544,0.0,0.1682006109946932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892946981236176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18551737677916014,0.0,0.0921546791061128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457656317728269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15866654851864706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851547364941088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17835245468097524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909124867897687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17529960700234426,0.0,0.36683791285492345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312227598433302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19780860244950266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3573534671956886,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thesleepingsatellite,2020/03/13,"Abilify and Restlessness Hello!  I started taking abilify about a month ago. I am now very, very restless. This is a side effect of the meds, apparently. Has anyone else experienced this and if so, what did you to that helped?",1.8319860627177675,4.531456170731712,3.674773519163765,79.14853658536587,97.04878048780488,7.220905923344947,22.930313588850176,7.957251820313856,2.285777700348433,177,7,30,5,7,59,35,41,0.129,0.871,0.0,-0.6326,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,3,2,0,2,3,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,6,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,3,0,3,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933353804143761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23138283047282285,0.3390605975768008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27643626573283925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218047435755585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36757096207021506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26413247479477203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23422270077303586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488062178694249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5460775716316572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yakuza47,2020/03/13,"I have no interest in any thing. I have no purpose in life. Hi 25M here. as the title says I have no interest in anything. I have nothing exciting in my  life that urges me to wake up in morning.

Even this post is written halfheartedly.

I graduated in 2017.

I still don't know what I want to do with my life.

Nothing interests me and lately, video games which were my favorite pass time doesn't interest me anymore.

People say find something that interests you, but I can't find a single thing.

What should I do?",1.3367647058823522,3.8342243431372567,3.1112745098039234,87.89573529411769,84.98039215686275,6.537254901960785,25.16666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.6287490196078434,401,17,81,8,12,133,65,102,0.11,0.807,0.084,0.1368,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,0,2,0,12,4,1,0,0,8,15,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,8,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,2,16,6,11,12,1,12,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,3,58,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100353898430354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20563319180682968,0.0,0.0,0.17062948113192894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13695119324494212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3790240632137971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395286743283813,0.0,0.2338972249684499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43936741487259373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3979114001772159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14374878025694168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19858177016130726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32978240972830025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15962638132043833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655881325228626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755051827602417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209061050811242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229903934692328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MalachiteSunbird,2020/03/13,"I was kind to myself today Today was a difficult day. Nothing out of the ordinary happened it was just a very difficult day for me.

But...!

I managed to be kind to myself. I treated myself to lunch and a coffee out even though this made me feel guilty for spending money on myself. I even took a nap in the afternoon. It may not seem like much but to let myself off the hook and give myself a break was a big deal for me today. 

I still feel kind of bad now but sometimes it helps to slow the pace down, listen to your body and be kind to yourself and remember you're human. The lofi channel on YouTube helps too.",2.7556800000000017,4.222686207999998,4.011400000000002,88.56670000000004,74.92,6.6000000000000005,23.7,7.1686216300943375,0.8517999999999994,476,14,99,5,10,156,72,125,0.09,0.7559999999999999,0.153,0.8897,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,0,7,9,0,0,11,0,8,2,1,1,0,17,16,8,0,0,5,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,4,6,1,0,4,2,2,1,1,3,0,0,6,3,15,6,20,6,1,19,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,2,10,74,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229907816205456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16269880409344364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889263080067152,0.1510075293883753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934884519879756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812259194556596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051052564595318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952584577004658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19635591624946008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6101175625077128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497788619209558,0.0,0.07155945037744467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385965676735754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767472088322658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405450712484041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592568323061674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13334378119766688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14486582818118418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11697375784132395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14390926280455782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4165186540372365,0.0,0.1627372135840319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085580338872175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OMYachingtentacles,2020/03/13,"Advice for talking to my doctor today? I’m finally going to see my primary (she’s actually a nurse practitioner) today about my anxiety, which has gone off the charts since I’ve seen her. And also ask her about possibly being manic depressive (currently officially major depressive). Anyway, I have stopped taking the Prozac she had me on because the capsule form it came in became a sensory issue, and I CAN NOT take it. 

I’m afraid she is going to be mad at me or judge me for just stopping it. I also think that an anxiety medication that acts right away like Xanax would be extremely helpful, but I don’t want her to think I’m just a pill seeker.

 I also had terrible chronic pain I was seeing her for the last few years that somehow went away recently, and that’s another thing I’m nervous about. It was a huge deal and I was making appointments with her all the time and going to all kinds of doctors who never found anything out, I’m terrified she thinks I’m a hypochondriac. No one took me seriously. Thankfully my physical body is MUCH better, but my mental health has declined. I’m also paying out of pocket. 

I’m just really nervous to be judged and not taken seriously, and not get put on a medication that might really help me if it would be a controlled substance.",5.227701833769945,6.372575380566808,6.749345082162418,72.55161467015958,68.47368421052633,10.184234341509883,30.723743748511552,10.328600350310266,3.400147606572993,1017,40,179,27,17,349,144,247,0.14,0.7829999999999999,0.077,-0.9172,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,12,14,1,3,13,0,20,11,1,2,3,37,50,15,0,4,10,0,0,1,0,3,10,0,0,0,13,11,0,3,4,0,1,9,6,10,0,1,12,3,26,4,24,30,6,31,0,2,3,0,15,11,0,4,12,127,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.10702209976834512,0.0,0.0,0.10716825458295903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508122370373791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499855714876114,0.16779449941430702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024906538900014,0.0,0.10252664550031344,0.0,0.2060771499540687,0.0,0.0,0.0668538139899323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969942026315086,0.0,0.12181864650440233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543326340990751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300423026391975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306495425436833,0.18891722034382372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22450378392960596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013812421114407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024749418903673,0.0,0.0,0.05729804846060061,0.0,0.1869839647869001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657408144278525,0.0,0.0,0.14701897831346694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144669866855006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420442837208555,0.0,0.08939568733966076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05357922228225239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320557650303257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22096197396442052,0.1105215651920428,0.11634253883710945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062006868348298,0.0,0.0845842648272617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431523018194194,0.0,0.11669661215294685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363644661339054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024864090895133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051482033267498,0.0,0.10828589416695457,0.0,0.0,0.09365758064731512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17478558171935185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072015717647534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18337806114838184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16491638257835495,0.0881485916556593,0.0,0.10096940123498983,0.0,0.0,0.07285987476781,0.21081632287487892,0.0,0.0,0.06394945885675474,0.0,0.20790867296729876,0.0,0.121847405118717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468620736470736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016651885999562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15581284261836606,0.0,0.0,0.07062388423280831
mentalhealth,thequietstream,2020/03/13,"Trisha Paytas's Video About Her DID: A Rant I dont know how many of you have seen Trisha's video regarding her self diagnosed DID. 

I have been following DISSOCIADID for quite some time now. I have to say I am thoroughly disappointed and honestly disgusted in the information Trisha was trying to pass off as fact.

I would strongly suggest watching Youtuber DISSOCIADID's videos. Her system and the way they interact with one another is honestly beautiful and heartwarming. Her whole channel is dedicated to educating people on the disorder. 

For Trisha to call DISSOCIADID crazy in her video was disgusting to me. To call anyone with a mental disorder is disgusting. Mental disorders are the body's fight mechanism, changing the chemicals to help the body get through severe trauma. 

I only have severe anxiety and depression and I found Trisha's video extremely offensive. I have been called crazy by ignorant people who try to use my mental illness as a weapon against me. Videos like the one Trisha made enable the ignorant to continue being ignorant. It is a perfect example of why mental illness is still not taken as seriously as it should be.

It fired me up.",6.303969160479723,8.816259048543692,7.236853226727586,64.76083095374076,67.73786407766991,11.643175328383784,34.447744146202176,11.326091736570909,5.128449229011993,948,46,139,35,17,316,121,206,0.255,0.627,0.11800000000000001,-0.9833,0,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,1,1,4,4,19,6,0,12,0,23,5,2,3,2,22,31,10,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,2,3,1,0,1,4,7,0,3,3,7,0,2,2,13,0,2,10,4,19,6,28,17,2,13,0,2,2,0,18,5,0,1,5,99,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123342136113059,0.08998431153796878,0.0,0.0,0.0822475137099974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613140973380721,0.0,0.0,0.3603308693558935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443373948154082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131193852982916,0.11938890044176688,0.0,0.0,0.4044321015324477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13785793501709567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12897190332859942,0.0,0.0,0.06145523793918475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884287978885249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464470754060596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746659689843432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130148490512122,0.0,0.11925528721490873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4741612860311307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15941416072754858,0.08946061259799194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630954633854339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511076359698428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354168924922897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271058517238867,0.2657699941024134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939370516976639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685892332410997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15972198535448393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015919368720528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336681520276116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061400464271579,0.1313263134157425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355882594916618,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BadtzGP,2020/03/13,"I don't know what to do. I've never posted something like this, but for once I've no one, nowhere and not even the will to reach out in my personal life anymore. I have nowhere else to turn.

I had a psychiatry appointment today, one I've been waiting for for uite a while, you could say I've been waiting nearly a year since being told I'd be put straight into another mental health service and wouldn't be left alone out in the deep end. You can probably guess where this story's going.

The psychiatrist heading the community service that I was in until this morning decided to discharge me, against my wishes. She didn't allow me to speak in the appointment. When I could get a few words in she would cut me off. She wrote off some points that I wanted to bring up as simple personality traits and that I can't compare myself to others, that each person is different. Well if it were that simple I wouldn't be in the services. She said that I shouldn't strive to label myself or something when I brought up that I suspect I've autism. No matter how many times I said how it's getting more and more difficult to exist in day to day life with others I wasn't listened to.

She told me what I thought, or what I went through. I said my last psychiatrist dismissed a lot my issues. She said that he didn't, even though these are two completely different services. This doctor in particular stated that I don't have depression and the source of most of my issues is me over exaggerating things in my head. Never got to say that because she wasn't interested in listening to me. 

From the beginning she had an opinion of me that I felt like I was going to have to fight against, and she never let go of it, leading her to finally discharge me. She said that I don't appear to like the service, that it's not beneficial, that I'm not happy with it and that I always had something to say about it. From the beginning of my attendance to this service I was never entirely sure of how I was being deal with. I had a main appointment at the beginning where she had to get to know me and my history. I was at the end of my rope at that point in my life due to trying to finish school and being in an abusive relationship where I was gaslit into thinking I was an awful broken person. I had very few, maybe 2 max I think, ""check in"" appointments later where 2 different doctors did just that, check in on me and asking basic uestions to write down the answers to in my file. At these points in my life I was cripplingly depressed, had no idea what was going on at all due to, yk, trauma. My head was beyond broken and I couldn't articulate much other than ""I feel terrible"" in those appointments. Today she backtracked on those check-ins, that they were proper meetings, that I didn't like the service sure I can't even make sense of what she said now as I'm writing this. I had no appointment during the next period of my life where I genuinely just wanted to do away with myself which is a sentiment that has yet to leave me and has been massively exasperated from today.  One of the doctor's even said in the meetings I've had before that there was nothing he could really help me with because he didn't know me, that it was a bit pointless to be doing mindfulness exercises, that he didn't believe in half that shit. The other doctor ended up hugging me at the end of our meeting because I was so fucking depressing. And today there was this bitch again. 

Apologies if the above paragraph isn't all that clear, I'm truly confused as to what my situation is too.

She told me that I have no mental illnesses and cut me off whenever I tried to say that I had no official diagnosis', just recommendations and screenings because I never got the time of day anywhere. The only chance that I had originally was the last psychiatrist that demeaned me. She replied to me in these exact words: ""We're doctors, not imbeciles. These doctors haven't found anything in you before. They would've seen something if there was."" I had two check in appointments and that was it. She also said that I've already been diagnosed with aspergers. I haven't been, the child health service said it was a likely possibility and wrote a recommendation about it in my file. I was seen very little times because I was over 18 when they finally saw me. They told me explicitly that this wasn't an official diagnosis. If it was, my previous service would have known. She refused to listen and rejected that.

​

I began tearing up at some point, leading to full blown sobbing in the end, to which her only response was (at the door to the office) \[name\] come on, I have to move on to the next person.

I broke down crying on the floor of the toilet inside. I couldn't go out in public in that condition. This is possibly the lowest I've felt since I: 1: Was left on the floor of my abusive ex boyfriend's floor to curl into a fetal position and cry, and 2: Crying in the school bathroom and cutting my arm after being demeaned by my principal for the sin of reaching out for help. 

This seuence of events has happened far too often for me to not give up finally, relapse into stuff or you know.",6.467310806602306,6.258363141025644,6.999768504100491,76.56270787916542,65.51873767258382,9.91657842831932,32.77961175127167,9.504929316542613,2.8766682445759373,4091,152,782,71,57,1345,364,1014,0.157,0.809,0.034,-0.9992,4,2,4,0,1,1,101.0,1,4,4,2,34,29,7,1,49,1,98,23,5,8,12,123,164,43,0,17,16,1,3,5,0,6,16,17,1,6,75,37,0,3,16,1,3,15,37,18,1,6,78,24,123,11,148,66,15,149,1,6,4,2,78,84,4,16,53,590,198,19,0.0,0.10930654071121512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047773938883348716,0.050902587788882535,0.036887959933791716,0.03838158254927771,0.049978876120428985,0.056049680077736835,0.0,0.048368462906216866,0.0,0.0,0.04574585555999085,0.0,0.0,0.03795881165658277,0.0,0.043122769300190135,0.0,0.04333808714868578,0.0,0.0,0.1405937736213588,0.0,0.07850181607600783,0.05196963570174165,0.0,0.0,0.05035903031643934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039734557403362604,0.04836356338757999,0.0,0.0,0.11048661140084592,0.0,0.15200591534896493,0.0892448164571653,0.04755518835572135,0.1191880462385994,0.04681820653031662,0.0,0.1445795336018761,0.0,0.2832792831806791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03853341388869288,0.0,0.20427534284913526,0.0,0.0,0.121866503163298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023323332910085,0.0,0.08857882291450186,0.15159050379246775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05057616900987882,0.0,0.04264391641983959,0.07229878183549976,0.04424947908305495,0.13107594838709055,0.0,0.07378438081056639,0.0,0.0508143866589713,0.0,0.04079019117442002,0.04910333502425333,0.0,0.0,0.14201965551656226,0.09806225876030317,0.0,0.0,0.06183627147483248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207207147737534,0.0,0.09628976809373303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140136168535152,0.07519976066257496,0.0,0.048842117062788855,0.10023482432837584,0.04716825723330422,0.16290526934491956,0.11267726699173596,0.046231641079753374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03921575413035015,0.0,0.0,0.030790309890886287,0.046765810272146234,0.0463410411089845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092970874746074,0.0,0.04657539175318974,0.0,0.0,0.04902598640716687,0.03390884980034475,0.0,0.17788096551744892,0.0,0.09811374665031634,0.0,0.0,0.044260358160661664,0.0,0.0,0.049124035494232485,0.09377109270438228,0.07016373249847221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20138275810154627,0.0,0.0,0.1744207134370296,0.10400312891126856,0.04417717244393203,0.0,0.04973299712237402,0.0,0.0,0.04637064525398598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029550309341024355,0.0,0.0,0.04952342369336555,0.0,0.0,0.39489835821760666,0.14672902121587833,0.0,0.09336651662719768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047348978222488174,0.07631390629641102,0.051848982422206105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14204409938466492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052804686551091266,0.0,0.0,0.08694880928696873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030644907531314963,0.059112982202075524,0.04531980707533237,0.036619898702922,0.08069154357956845,0.0,0.1748930279758366,0.17630632707246552,0.0,0.06263477484161815,0.0501732223217497,0.09011927749080356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611965465975135,0.05441411612523708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04147395402088301,0.042760440005255314,0.0,0.0,0.05304408229564212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830246420504546,0.0,0.056049680077736835,0.02970444855572123
mentalhealth,IchigoRamen,2020/03/13,"I’m finding it hard to keep on living. I don’t want to have a pity party on myself but the past couple of weeks my life has been such a rollercoaster and I’m finding it really hard to keep existing. 

My depression had gotten better for a while but it started to decline for numerous reasons. Having recently had a close friend (who I fell in love with) move to another country to sort his life out, not knowing if I’d hear from him again. Which has hit me so hard that I’m finding it hard to cope with the idea of them never coming back. And, knowing how much I want to be talking to him right now to make it feel better.

Realising I literally have no friends, bar one, and I can’t  rely on her because she’s pregnant and that just isn’t fair to dump my problems on her. 

To having just been told from a close family member that my mental health doesn’t matter and I basically won’t be receiving any support from them and if I continue I can no longer live where I do. 

I have no reasons to keep going. None. I’m on the edge of having a huge break down over it all. It’s too much to handle.",4.3340413533834585,4.380296802631584,5.770200501253133,82.69973684210527,70.00877192982456,8.794987468671678,28.127819548872186,8.634040054169528,1.8769187969924808,853,27,182,13,14,290,129,228,0.11599999999999999,0.731,0.153,0.9001,0,0,0,0,1,0,18.0,0,0,2,2,10,10,1,0,9,0,21,5,0,4,2,40,43,13,0,5,7,0,5,0,2,1,3,1,0,0,12,12,1,3,9,1,0,5,11,4,0,1,6,6,24,6,33,33,4,30,0,2,0,1,16,14,0,3,10,130,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813634617764229,0.12545938484981822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200047795365143,0.0,0.07293516184895399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21163453347342773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306453481416966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323861517400814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305102446291442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279171001118778,0.0,0.06049667125499422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32806314758248617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18487658498104206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799764501566262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4287176764717841,0.0,0.0,0.12717822649135738,0.13484986844012736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135065901682139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190408961439758,0.0,0.0,0.1315087527656681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690191802905577,0.0,0.0,0.21129942503908689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079852910609476,0.0,0.07986471155256328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205751439445964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12716488651344215,0.17590732395878292,0.0,0.09227846067211884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107530472350384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11421575604122555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11448517453027925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664836567651688,0.2460322687311537,0.11813610541673646,0.0,0.0,0.10217712939940986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468613677856113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577299466009915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616701599300001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432699123874447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114075837918272,0.0,0.09597289737912557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashfewtron,2020/03/13,"Im on leave from a mental ward and feeling the urge to relapse with everything TW I’m at my girlfriends on over night leave from a Psychiatric ward, it’s 12:30am and I can’t sleep.
I’m feeling the overwhelming urge to relapse with all my shit, just get drunk, high, self harm and binge/purge. I just want to get fucked up and throw myself into traffic. I feel like I may need to go back in tonight, as opposed to in the morning when I said I would be back. 
I don’t feel safe with myself and it’s so shit because I know they want to discharge me sometime next week, and I can’t even handle overnight leave without having a meltdown. This is so fucked. I’ve taken PRN, I’ve used my coping strategies and nothing is working. I’m scared I’m going to do dumb shit tonight; and I don’t know what to do. Someone please help.",1.1348104575163376,3.3406842588235293,2.114509803921571,96.72418300653601,82.88235294117645,4.483660130718954,23.562091503267972,5.46131890053228,0.16446405228758246,644,24,141,3,18,202,97,170,0.203,0.706,0.092,-0.9694,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,1,8,11,6,2,6,0,12,7,4,1,1,30,34,12,0,4,3,0,4,1,1,2,0,1,0,1,4,12,1,2,6,1,0,3,5,9,0,0,2,5,17,2,23,29,1,20,0,1,0,2,5,9,6,1,9,79,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20874292545938272,0.0,0.08274249977741534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965136622995241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219894288019982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745257941960689,0.0969687637881304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509687416442357,0.14183136246232825,0.0,0.15428210440459653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909799834472405,0.14341096618401503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661656707616946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14919227805343546,0.0,0.0,0.4311697548299908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06631302723328507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678846482385193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064542210561024,0.0,0.0,0.14435519531324895,0.12737764630416504,0.0,0.1302409267824259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489957358557659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911460552584875,0.0,0.1358939274029163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416007005031241,0.0,0.4179885836110621,0.0,0.0,0.13583253965428768,0.0,0.11500741307752364,0.0,0.13424490488232144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723103924850928,0.0,0.0,0.1601194660122804,0.0,0.1088780396001012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13084322761707634,0.0,0.09881634264518876,0.0,0.0,0.09642190419839096,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ruda_zelaza,2020/03/13,"I fucking hate myself I hate my face, I hate my body, I hate my voice, I hate my art, I hate my personality, I hate the way I laugh,

 I hate the fact that even though I have been going to the gym for three months I put on weight and am the heaviest I have ever been.

I hate the fact that I'm just a poorer version of everyone else. 

I hate the feeling that everyone else is better than me. 

I hate the fact that I have overanalyzed everything and each and every one of my action to a point that I'm unable to form a sentence most of the time so I just keep quiet or stutter until I hate myself even more.
 
I hate the feeling of everyone laughing or talking about me behind my back. 

I hate the feeling and the fear of being a pathetic loser till the end of my life. 
I just wish I could be someone else, but me.",2.8548245614035075,3.5448089415204684,4.734751461988306,86.49756578947371,73.61988304093569,7.571345029239764,24.77631578947368,7.793537801064563,1.1200561403508766,623,18,139,8,12,214,81,171,0.258,0.667,0.075,-0.983,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,10,21,15,1,16,0,10,5,2,0,4,22,33,11,0,2,6,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,5,5,1,1,3,2,0,3,0,18,0,2,2,6,35,3,16,28,5,13,0,1,0,1,2,2,1,3,7,104,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050750856685732364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837270695198313,0.0,0.07331246570172563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052696595832901816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16540662626973685,0.0,0.05845748210175941,0.0,0.0,0.08718635382163865,0.0597018733294352,0.05560886626097936,0.1892009544969396,0.05931763200769383,0.0,0.0,0.07426971098198501,0.100116585080335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061017055364894476,0.0,0.0,0.03751000879469053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9122754321582202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05866490826003332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04661860670108402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05268153634890397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04472412820341568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05762971102204135,0.0,0.0,0.06239247718122499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06634944597752747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055922611279393374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05304927273327898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484585398341547,0.0,0.03848583647586594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05238868860853079,0.0,0.08037169327877935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589813455096789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TortillaApple,2020/03/13,GF with BPD Im not going to add amy unnecesary details. In short my GF recently told me she has BPD and I a lot of issues that we have had are making sense as to why they were problems. Namely she never feel like I lover her as much as I promise and emphasize it to her and she always feels like I am going to leave. She is pretty sure she has it but has never done extensive research into it. I truly do love her and really do not want to leave her or things to end. How should I go about talking to her about this? Can I just be honest and tell her exactly whats going on? Is there another approach to it? Also she lives at home with her mother so should I possibly talk to her Mom on working on all of this? Really looking for amy realm of advice from someone with experience or an education in the field. Any and all help is appreciated!,2.5295999999999985,3.940453360000003,4.658714285714286,83.92578571428572,75.4,7.742857142857144,23.357142857142854,8.418075326091056,1.3714,658,19,138,12,14,228,110,175,0.059000000000000004,0.789,0.152,0.9739,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,1,1,7,8,0,0,3,0,18,2,0,2,6,34,29,15,0,4,6,2,2,2,3,2,0,0,1,0,9,12,0,0,2,0,0,5,4,1,0,0,4,3,26,7,29,22,4,17,0,0,1,2,28,8,0,3,6,107,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355592347766116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093732604893126,0.11542926594979945,0.0,0.0,0.09433690133708177,0.14546393862776733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34943539261520623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196255152511714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12286805968172893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13569843829716213,0.0,0.0,0.14028578388384225,0.1982085374542165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31535959699567706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929835998326593,0.0,0.1391512236810185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14984544605632472,0.14479154468508473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937768244836475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355468258911634,0.0,0.12249560538162,0.0,0.11649300448835945,0.0,0.0,0.11793796431198275,0.1252035929428043,0.0,0.0925991747346212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16247156955722614,0.0,0.0,0.10197791184432167,0.0,0.2139846031596956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639017504420247,0.0,0.1411319173064376,0.0,0.13273988567373324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777399622042491,0.0,0.13697295908659554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175401760936917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074548474282202,0.0,0.0,0.2230017774942332,0.12125066466675295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216188980476876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255647998718936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182285701194285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517659970860345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099253608652824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jasmine-dragon,2020/03/13,"Advice needed: how do you plan your life and get stuff done with mental illness? I have bipolar disorder, and that makes planning daily tasks almost impossible. I don't know how I'm going to feel an hour from now much less tomorrow morning. I could wake up feeling great one day and get a ton of stuff done... or I could wake up feeling like crap and struggle to get out of bed. 

I want to increase my productivity and make it a more stable line instead of a line that resembles a heart monitor, but I don't know how to do that given my drastic mood swings. 

I've tried having a planner/bullet journal, to do lists, and many other things, but they all just make me feel shittier when I don't check everything off the list. 

So here's my question: how do you plan your life? How do you make sure you get things done even when you feel bad?",4.597792207792207,5.221351809523814,5.186601731601733,85.07961038961041,69.59523809523809,8.013852813852813,27.772727272727273,8.00094639256281,1.5741357142857135,656,21,136,8,11,211,102,168,0.1,0.8140000000000001,0.086,-0.7425,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,7,1,3,13,7,1,1,7,0,15,8,4,9,2,36,35,17,0,4,4,0,5,1,0,0,4,0,1,0,9,8,0,0,8,0,1,2,3,3,0,1,4,5,19,3,14,29,6,12,0,0,0,0,9,4,1,3,7,92,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283091917775202,0.0,0.0,0.13148244275628476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963373363575384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096718427051769,0.0,0.0,0.08468050961655195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504862787830919,0.0,0.0,0.4031101299490012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672535282210217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180079757656318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319573833843529,0.0938039274346166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27440462913269764,0.0,0.07462334653275332,0.0,0.0,0.1447636229402015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559640897072996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12930843690340138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14432298688376866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18548843652745567,0.06414872327497123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505869678017549,0.13312210625847626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232400545256662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652388101383456,0.0973605881214364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897529551555812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470910377574119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726792349305106,0.3006243686613365,0.0,0.0,0.12375289299586675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744656881993405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914710451309975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774467683402809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TonyTwoTries,2020/03/13,"Suffocating ego I always find that people are out to get me and see me fail; that the world is against me and I need to prove everyone wrong.

 Every little issue I have with myself gets to me and brings me down, I overthink every little thing someone would say to me, and I make sure to word everything I say so I don't have any chances at accidentally get off on any wrong foot.

My ego just cant take the chance of someone not liking me. I feel need to make sure everyone likes me. If they don't like me then is there something wrong with me? Is there something I dont understand about myself? Is my tone of voice off? Are my facial expressions while I talk make you think I mean one thing when I say another?

I'm not a bad person, I hope not at least. People I dont even know the names of or just meet get me anxious because I think they already hate me before I even get a chance to get a word out. 

Did u do something wrong? Are people talking or criticizing me behind my back? Is someone spreading rumors? 

It all tends to make me force myself into isolation, and I need to get over my ego before I get myself or others possibly hurt. 

Anyone else relate? I know I'm not alone in this weird thing where our ego cant take a beating. I should see someone professional about this one day. I'd love to see someone dig into my head and see what makes me tick.

And If your reading this and are depressed or suicidal then i hope your fight goes well and really hope you have things or people close by to help.

 I'm gonna order a pizza and chill for a bit to get my mind off things",3.5000546812483364,4.386645524539877,4.561138970392109,87.60676046945854,72.28220858895705,7.387356628434253,23.98986396372366,7.586124646067393,0.9207985062683384,1235,32,267,14,23,404,156,326,0.183,0.748,0.069,-0.9881,0,2,3,0,1,0,24.0,1,4,2,2,13,21,2,0,9,0,22,5,3,5,4,59,63,22,1,10,13,0,1,3,0,3,0,4,0,1,13,17,1,0,9,1,0,1,10,11,1,2,1,9,54,10,36,59,3,26,0,3,4,1,20,18,0,10,9,173,67,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512489087963875,0.08004471564440922,0.0,0.06035533741194887,0.0,0.0,0.09865323951853808,0.07605978453478306,0.0,0.08194445598344029,0.0,0.05071850033122367,0.07432118016433248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055775313569632286,0.060564103372216786,0.044216960746950515,0.0,0.12344471702372176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918996728665259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04677938959068989,0.0,0.062474710250815364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700221054092846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060594093375394224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581801256099587,0.0,0.12222855555578538,0.13862153605388947,0.0651902202542975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036676122605212434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662961227088114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.341071192144206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161377816111003,0.07444233803913476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04861900918713703,0.0,0.0,0.21613232119287348,0.0,0.0,0.0776507410181523,0.0,0.0,0.07570820503758685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972721539937683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631152781484962,0.14539923114916692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546611065288839,0.0,0.24209001024084664,0.0,0.0,0.07901241185424332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324016618513214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16135243764361334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830384894272047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20114789956817208,0.06333519103107661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177286500991549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725551179736748,0.0,0.04646809152840813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17304939626133256,0.0,0.0,0.2312055736171266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072954215389331,0.1675240892177435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934205180500242,0.0,0.13672767961937374,0.0,0.10907532090980376,0.11660255666862075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409467785279341,0.09295562478832538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551200198410894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652181156293972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05152713012726983,0.3172246809400493,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mackygee210116,2020/03/13,"I can’t live a normal life 😞 I need some advice, I think I might need help but last time I went for help they thought I was lying!

I’ve had over 100 jobs in 3 years, Every job I have they are extremely happy with my hard work, get on really well with everyone... then ain’t of nowhere I’m scared to leave my house and this happens every month... it’s costing me my working life and making me look bad, I get asked to describe it but how can I? I don’t even know what happens to me, I lose all motivation to leave my house. Not because I’m lazy but because I am constantly arguing with my thoughts, but still no reason at all why I get like this... mental health didn’t believe me and I’m worried they are ignoring a serious problem here, some people think I’m weird which is understandable as 1 week I’m up the next week I’m extremely down, I have tried so many natural ways to fix this and nothing works. 

The worst part is I have a wife and kid an the situation with my working life has become to much for them and they have left me untill I sort my problems out, I don’t drink nor do I take any drugs, I train at the gym when my mind allows me to leave the house and I eat good food

The mental health team thought I was lying because I was able to go down to there building by myself, dressed ok... but not being able to explain how my head is. It’s living hell for me, I can’t move forward in life and the stresses of getting a job knowing I’m going to lose it after a week or 2 is bringing more and more down to the point where I feel like I’m going to just give up on life

I just want to be normal! I need help but the only help I can get do not believe me

Any advice would be greatly appreciated",1.738374429223743,3.0959201753424708,3.47664383561644,91.80692922374432,77.38356164383562,6.291324200913242,23.125570776255714,6.88968998030894,0.5373488584474888,1324,40,305,13,30,443,184,365,0.156,0.706,0.139,-0.6739,3,0,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,5,8,12,20,2,2,15,1,31,12,1,6,2,59,70,24,0,9,12,1,2,2,0,2,8,0,0,1,9,14,3,1,12,3,1,7,11,13,1,0,9,3,50,7,40,56,9,38,1,2,1,0,16,17,1,5,17,188,59,9,0.1485746969971495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518547436669085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101035888801513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944864279125572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06202683301169016,0.13585463440347326,0.08204453995612175,0.0,0.16739280544424742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027823266291073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277332003965596,0.08614973958612598,0.07601450337092591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049066093062638726,0.0,0.12518059019423566,0.07098474500476926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037561915485953966,0.05307089661069589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982855667985107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940603674663357,0.07126319381637382,0.12665763631307395,0.06230870338122752,0.0,0.0819020639770572,0.0,0.0,0.13138411387910734,0.07908026384436516,0.0665468727324328,0.0,0.07624025146009841,0.15792795524191794,0.0,0.0,0.1991729751539784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571528784710698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211561919767539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165276790562996,0.060554104026664,0.0,0.23597872744091344,0.08071342150554962,0.0,0.2623567559122121,0.0725860921549815,0.0,0.13119417946311604,0.0,0.06238266299199253,0.16621708200415303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495873819735135,0.07531571151715435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972834943144991,0.07880713722464966,0.07500904504098742,0.0,0.05929545282891668,0.07895569493180203,0.05460974875832248,0.16524938286035473,0.0,0.0,0.07900543789982824,0.0,0.1455716576621183,0.07128071442525095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05649887604929552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044595917469262,0.0,0.05150149379942254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022555612419143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421659195751546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04759037768446051,0.07637976679695574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437459537979982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350209223028754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05932597247184185,0.0,0.0850959067143664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05585484089633668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520066665244754,0.0,0.17692757019155433,0.04331755031255058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05043623328090725,0.0,0.0,0.07733574967107293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04381660286329101,0.05896583944671861,0.17876649006531478,0.0,0.06679324785211715,0.06886511631127556,0.06703277736205747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163282978600515,0.07544240839401105,0.0,0.0527716009652338,0.0,0.0,0.04783861682668928
mentalhealth,throwaway2R371e8,2020/03/13,"(M17) Russian teen with depression for over a year now. I seriously need help. It started 3-4 years ago when my mom married one man. I did not mind at the time and all seemed to be fine at first, but when he moved in our flat, my life began to fall apart. He hated me, my mom started to hate me too for seemingly no reason at all. They always try to find excuse to punish me. I have no privacy, all my stuff belong to them and they can do anything they want with it. Because of that, my grades started to get worse. I lost all of my friends. I cry every single night. This is the kind of thing you can not get used to. My grandma's house is the only place I feel confortable at.",1.7013849765258229,3.1893038098591537,3.2348591549295764,92.9467018779343,77.80281690140845,6.141784037558686,21.6924882629108,6.816661863887847,0.32325164319248856,519,14,119,5,12,171,96,142,0.21899999999999997,0.718,0.063,-0.9829,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,1,4,2,4,9,3,0,4,0,8,1,0,2,4,20,23,5,0,2,3,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,6,0,2,3,1,22,3,21,19,5,23,0,2,0,0,14,8,0,2,13,79,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430335972257387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606741182106931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467878663431715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235832386976746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16642524058627509,0.0,0.0,0.13049425888939298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765265103542472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660737311288685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847624687484952,0.12887325994210178,0.0,0.0,0.11705527950275298,0.0,0.1583141305184686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991670347852948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155311719479697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17482074820751806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157773041707675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070151062789602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653896911837249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15298064078880724,0.35489041882141364,0.0,0.16102981711062256,0.0,0.1123418136489104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421806924225882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10266624576772426,0.11522922678385886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582943901117564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557762222077762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27585573987921563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217160056793354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17344126331873144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065567705575428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834596681765926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286449163658604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085490914136674,0.0,0.0,0.08936378245519795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15440035352348194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19513332699004865
mentalhealth,just_someredditor,2020/03/13,"i hate my life and wish it would just be over somehow my grandpa died and i didnt even see it coming. he was in a world of pain, but there were signs he was getting better. or so i thought. i wont see him ever again. i need time. now i cant get that, its too late. i wasnt there for him enough. im a fucking lame excuse for a granddaughter. i feel so sorry. i want to apologize to him. aaand i cant do that either. i hope he knew. the apologies didnt even get across how sorry i am. id been depressed as i normally am and have chronic stomach pain. the lack of energy plus unbearable pain sometimes made it too much of a struggle to get ready to go when i wanted to go visit. or im just weak. i know i am. during that time i had two breakups in four or five months. first time, he got sick of my paranoia (thanks anxiety/bpd) which i cant help and i just needed to ask if things were alright periodically. he got verbally abusive one day. i wasnt supposed to talk. and he just insulted/criticized me and my every move for hours. i thought i cant lose someone else, so i tried to take it. and i couldnt. i ended it. next relationship, there was concern on his end that it wouldnt work out. i convinced him id do whatever would help. under a month into that he decided we were screwed. he didnt say anything. for the rest of the month. just pretended it was all going well. because he was avoiding the breakup. in good news, this coronavirus bullshit could take me out. my immune system cant be fully functional with the way my health has gone. that would be cool... if my mom hadnt implied she cant cope with me not being around anymore. so that cancels that. it isnt worth her suffering, if she would. i dont see why a person would care about me THAT much. i just take her word for it. shes had mystery coughing fits for a year+ though, and shes been out breathing the air. im so drained, worried, and sad.",0.33862288722637857,2.4921455610972596,2.245433083956776,94.83560875588807,85.9077306733167,5.2602050429481855,21.37993904128568,6.640361216903883,0.3206734386256587,1474,50,335,17,45,488,204,401,0.20600000000000002,0.6940000000000001,0.1,-0.9938,0,1,0,0,0,1,59.0,1,0,0,4,28,23,3,2,14,2,48,14,2,2,2,65,82,26,1,19,15,2,1,0,0,7,10,1,0,1,22,19,0,1,6,1,1,7,18,14,1,5,25,6,51,9,36,44,7,43,0,5,3,2,34,15,2,8,19,224,73,1,0.0,0.10369077813573277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679120807660147,0.0,0.0,0.07201725884231466,0.07790676427911325,0.08181456434373513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053348235862127114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739976660155708,0.0,0.0,0.11022188085191892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922721475072716,0.0,0.0,0.07538628794261856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987348079502792,0.0,0.0,0.05643983365687499,0.0,0.07537640583106807,0.0,0.09082658997145704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025667439363243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310742146530788,0.0,0.15502434980487612,0.09042622676152036,0.0,0.11560545653958824,0.07916218559429032,0.07373502950818317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04425013402546228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07444008054333016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090606193476645,0.1828915731973667,0.0,0.14921010575985116,0.07340329799216756,0.1399872287738747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640278897007704,0.0,0.09302418547365243,0.0,0.0,0.11731870873450714,0.0,0.0,0.08692198539238613,0.08618449159441488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28359314340451514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04809586886916355,0.0,0.09872055450973248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181432156164726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790672361684306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280866023838644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249632613076956,0.20956053764839586,0.09301442798124172,0.12866695802860334,0.1297822940176381,0.0,0.0,0.09307302810781956,0.0,0.08574596474274894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059302322355034874,0.0,0.2793658888504447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641458509180278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939581896069241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959531555007775,0.0,0.0,0.20921399728070736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415104227280657,0.0,0.08655441723680805,0.19593140304467926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148951516061864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974008111932952,0.07034111560588922,0.0,0.08057190922201027,0.0,0.0,0.0581409728483631,0.0,0.08598288867301694,0.13895401929477025,0.15309182576446453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941683360781209,0.0,0.08548928497096492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323704338060806,0.06946520870100194,0.0,0.0,0.07868635374991287,0.0,0.07896853352644413,0.0,0.10063775018298876,0.0,0.0,0.06371184782487331,0.0888755708927304,0.0,0.3108401668603701,0.0,0.0,0.05635668944959221
mentalhealth,JakeWok,2020/03/13,"I've tried getting help, what's the point of carrying on now? So after months of feeling depressed, suicidal and lonely I finally plucked up the courage to get help. I went to the doctors and they referred me to this other service. I spoke to them about how I was feeling, explaining everything I'm going through. It took a lot for me to do this and now they've referred me to something else!
Honestly, what's the point of even trying anymore. I feel like I'm just being passed around to be someone else's problem and every single time I'll have to explain everything again only to be dumped on someone else's doorstep. The only consolation is at least I can leave this world knowing I tried every other option.",4.331205533596837,6.169738326086957,4.950553359683795,81.91440711462455,71.53623188405797,7.337022397891962,32.11067193675889,8.00094639256281,2.4649913043478264,571,27,102,8,11,183,85,138,0.11900000000000001,0.759,0.122,-0.2714,0,2,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,9,7,1,0,6,0,8,1,0,1,0,18,22,6,1,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,8,5,0,0,8,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,4,4,12,3,21,15,3,19,0,2,0,0,7,8,0,2,8,69,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484255391635237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323185318963618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128904573673068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15318648296204698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37507284510660027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09885103916279987,0.0,0.2521951647528896,0.0,0.2690150147410712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270224189640501,0.10691931946918032,0.0,0.16394856599239513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563855427402594,0.0,0.08505696558767348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20063198777598434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225090336504125,0.0,0.0,0.15847157016061336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311781100164899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723818101660106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11945962606569055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22765100134926997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829599328318121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320733531400612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536180489425794,0.11521793492591885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16370709557851584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726973343722368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16628116570222784,0.3048341793737438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13873915538264328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,communist_pidgeon,2020/03/13,"I genuinely hate everything about me Pretty much what the title says. I hate myself. I hate the way i look, the way i act, the way i do my hair and the way i dress. I’m so fucking socially anxious and awkward and while I’m not impossible to have a conversation with, i still hate how I can’t just talk to people normally.

No guys or girls or anyone has ever had a crush on me, not even in primary school. I’m 14 years old, i turn 15 in less than a month and yet nobody has ever thought i looked attractive or told me that they like me. It’s nobody’s fault but my own, I’ve never told anyone that I’ve liked them either. 

All of my friends and everyone in my year group is so attractive. They are all getting invited to dances and going out on dates, and I’m stuck by myself. I often find myself dreaming about what it would be like if I wasn’t the way i am. 

I feel like everyone who compliments me is lying, their just saying it to be nice. I wish i could put how i feel into words but i realize how whiny and annoying i sound.

Thats pretty much it, sorry for the rant.",2.4888053899974056,3.508325607929517,4.432625032391812,87.06590567504534,74.8590308370044,7.984348276755638,23.04457113241773,8.4952907291091,1.213867271313812,831,22,186,15,17,285,128,227,0.136,0.7,0.16399999999999998,0.9132,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,4,0,15,17,6,1,10,0,15,2,1,3,5,41,36,20,0,5,11,0,3,4,1,1,0,3,0,2,10,11,0,0,5,2,0,4,6,8,0,0,6,8,36,9,18,26,7,27,0,0,2,1,16,7,1,5,15,128,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431075717204085,0.0,0.153881189474952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785578008590675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267855737906534,0.19906996158080625,0.0,0.21029059135730566,0.09889437354567952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112762667460972,0.07861062423606535,0.0,0.0,0.10057204130036963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501449649496053,0.10172765266709584,0.0574899148130629,0.0,0.06253669770503825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895416484934163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4345559625879843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21503454358484192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848071313089625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783067290975219,0.0,0.16178006076502705,0.0,0.08486750090255787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781312933001784,0.0,0.0,0.11546557017679275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628596528829905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238948586491536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106178158662742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750120551719245,0.0,0.11136355864548804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216910600066808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317767815455245,0.0,0.0,0.08787587976200135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844376311803971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735727505135878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21029059135730566,0.0,0.0,0.11968891607622968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4367121853539545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653739226694194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07816729617825054,0.0,0.0,0.14172074607754298
mentalhealth,frick-me-in-the-butt,2020/03/13,"In public I try and pretend I’m a different person and I get my identities mixed up sometimes. Possible mental health issue? In public, I pretend to be people I’m not. If I go to a restaurant and they ask for my name I’ll speak with accents and tell them that my name is something random. It’s gotten so bad that at these places I’m now considered a regular and all of these places see me and refer to me as the identity I put on in there. Recently I just realized how bad this was. Example:

I go to this sushi restaurant pretty often. When I’m there, while ordering I always pretend that I have a stutter and I change my name. I’ve gone here enough times that some of the employees remember who I am and how I stutter. Well this week, I went back to get some food and didn’t notice an acquaintance in the restaurant. I did my normal stuttering and stuff and he came up and was like “bro _______ I didn’t know you stuttered do you need help?” That was an awkward situation because basically the employees found out that I was a liar and it was really embarrassing for me.

I know that it’s fucked up to imitate someone with a stuttering problem and do these things but for some reason I can’t stop doing it? When I’m in public I put on all these personas and I can’t stop doing it. Is this a sign of something deeper mentally? As a background, I have already been medicated and diagnosed with OCD. Thanks for the feedback!",2.3241988304093577,4.461711291228075,4.135789473684214,84.21163742690062,78.19298245614036,7.590643274853799,25.994152046783622,8.515128840125781,1.9860643274853804,1118,44,221,24,27,377,144,285,0.126,0.8320000000000001,0.042,-0.9386,3,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,2,0,13,15,2,2,15,0,21,5,0,3,2,50,42,26,0,4,4,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,23,21,1,2,7,3,0,7,5,12,1,0,14,2,33,3,30,27,6,32,0,0,1,1,18,14,1,6,11,161,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14027321105658747,0.0,0.10576884326491054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883422006908728,0.0,0.0,0.09774264633354138,0.21226938434073436,0.07748737711420736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453842945441063,0.0,0.0,0.13446951874710672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901780540423435,0.0,0.13280683957570402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131342508723125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15370648070211032,0.1393736927360273,0.0,0.11751463625089212,0.1328234015083508,0.0,0.14448337478481152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351159981965985,0.0,0.0,0.08520168361102523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267375539355256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971681231716535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210136946107595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12805375477201,0.2562015744555114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425325314675446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245445102105012,0.0,0.14471987478464002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812468612875322,0.11099084489573073,0.26561367915140804,0.0,0.0,0.14330168156502007,0.0,0.12932040690402438,0.0,0.12163071511633075,0.0,0.2555689048863311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143233888565245,0.13069413096605292,0.12550951720910866,0.0,0.14399512717098567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129322080901104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288120840818794,0.0,0.0,0.10770308864296528,0.19571678767066272,0.12571877328169215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212545614537664,0.0,0.0,0.1455148601104309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110304168859096,0.11702928529507065,0.0,0.0,0.08444874354479491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741210641389745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630190892533615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196300252764956,0.0,0.11429054903556685,0.11783574246965413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,halfmanhalfshark0701,2020/03/13,I dont know what to do anymore Earlier this week me and my girlfriend for over two years broke up and I went on a crazy bender. I was blackout for almost three days in a hotel with some random chick I just met. Now nothing feels real I dont feel the same about anything my ex says she wants to give us another chance but I cant stop thinking about all the shit ive done. People have told me I need to go to a hospital but I have an exam tomorrow I been studying for months for. I dont know what to do i just wanna not be me anymore I cant go to a hospital or else I'll lose all the hard work ive done but I dont really trust myself not to do something stupid,-0.07531531531531499,1.7005062432432467,2.449891891891891,95.0716846846847,84.54054054054055,5.568288288288289,19.32612612612613,6.742157984588678,0.046328288288288284,516,14,124,6,15,178,89,148,0.12300000000000001,0.81,0.067,-0.7843,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,2,5,5,2,0,8,0,18,1,1,0,2,27,31,6,0,3,8,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,3,3,0,1,5,1,0,3,8,4,0,2,7,4,23,1,19,23,4,14,0,2,0,0,9,4,1,4,7,86,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359122728989279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423229426364195,0.0,0.0,0.26921197762030524,0.0,0.0,0.11169281489100416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753351619393282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277794321641889,0.6362901631419379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338356699693584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13725659954455527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13020293999087612,0.15427502601834714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158588484383355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491854331858887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184523450780768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833702326489572,0.0,0.0,0.10064080454367948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302349513934539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409690399065394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448850460358068,0.08695101577624244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793658106365688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932313550088246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449026593920932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134749249237869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869692054441152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12969419414373798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325868137016057,0.0,0.1632644167316661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005605990539126,0.0,0.1088730443297726,0.0,0.0,0.1258214812774998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881180900051437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740456640186108
mentalhealth,Eadwulf_Falaran,2020/03/13,I got banned from ELI5 for ranting at the mods and then sent here. Don't really care why Pretty sure this will get me banned. Don't relaly give a fguck. Alcohol is awesome. fuck you,0.4735135135135131,2.9257444594594624,1.6473513513513502,96.43210810810814,90.8918918918919,5.122162162162162,15.508108108108113,6.742157984588678,-0.2798821621621621,143,3,31,2,5,45,34,37,0.256,0.539,0.205,-0.3572,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,1,4,10,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,3,2,3,7,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,1,1,0,1,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.377437944965664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3600866690006512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265057014884913,0.18451998519989626,0.3387987882321134,0.0,0.0,0.28246726658811155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3593071596871413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262537142602665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33286438433950905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31868658315563725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mikooLarri,2020/03/13,"Unnecessary Thoughts If thoughts can kill, then definitely I was buried for a long time ago",4.648125,8.062587562500003,3.7550000000000026,82.39000000000001,79.625,8.200000000000001,33.0,8.841846274778883,3.2626000000000013,75,4,14,2,2,22,15,16,0.242,0.619,0.139,-0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,7,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3727957498127199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4652806952205031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721770595205172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6677458057533723,0.2452284217666016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thelairdstokes,2020/03/13,I don’t know what to do with myself.  For the past two years I’ve gone through at least 100 phases of stuff I’m interested in. I’m nearing the time where I need to start making major life decisions but I don’t know where to start. I just want to have something I’m very passionate in but I either get scared away by exercising all it has to offer or the career not paying enough for me to get by in life.,2.054285714285715,3.378063919540232,3.76978653530378,90.17172413793104,76.47126436781609,6.810509031198686,20.47454844006568,7.447530270364453,0.39248243021346507,319,7,73,4,7,107,57,87,0.046,0.855,0.099,0.5407,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,3,0,5,4,0,1,1,14,18,3,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,1,1,3,1,0,1,1,0,7,2,19,17,5,14,0,0,0,1,1,8,0,1,5,49,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23636742151002146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259949094639103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628800325549344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27652326136293764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3553963822477739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16793141172646334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18654316915735286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401613025395412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25187518077452803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19367835385233773,0.0,0.0,0.3561388309409776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879985810380845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14669815358278526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24575682327378984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075796104755436,0.14838823271251828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16200908656638352
mentalhealth,dryadanae,2020/03/13,Depression might actually save my life I haven’t left the house since last Saturday. Not because of any quarantine but because I’m in the middle of a severe depression flare up. But at least this way I won’t contract COVID-19! Thanks depression I guess,3.913829787234043,6.822874851063838,4.395148936170212,80.29400000000003,77.08510638297872,8.866382978723406,30.676595744680853,9.3871,3.4217863829787234,206,10,36,6,5,65,37,47,0.28800000000000003,0.606,0.106,-0.9041,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,6,6,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,5,4,1,8,0,3,0,0,0,5,0,2,2,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.22369989440355414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588738341809244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794785593329601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.592318254828703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525277473361703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645059416595838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18685678809611794,0.0,0.0,0.2490640550495817,0.0,0.16191517167353892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24318167657742665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589698400421439,0.0,0.18962522343122573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110484137682564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18195574921814625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rhda123,2020/03/13,"Final straw I don’t even know what to say. I can’t shake this feeling off, I’m just such a failure. I live such a miserable life and please save the “it could be worse” shit. I work at a job I hate, I’m failing to hold up my end of a relationship with my partner who has dealt with my shit for 4 years. And the only reason she is really with me is cause she has nobody else. If she had more friends she wouldn’t be with me. I wake up, and as soon as I’m awake I wish I never woke. I literally feel like I just have a big void in my chest. My throat is constantly clenched from just axienty and stress. I don’t even see myself having a future, I can honestly say that if I think where I would be even next year I would say dead. I planned on killing myself 2 weeks ago. I’m such a burden. Nothing would be different if I was dead. My girlfriend would eventually be happier. I couldn’t lie anymore. There has to be something better than this.... god I hope there is.",0.7658780487804897,2.623506697560977,2.6250609756097556,94.49856707317076,82.02439024390246,6.051219512195122,20.493902439024392,7.1686216300943375,0.3039219512195115,743,21,176,10,20,247,119,205,0.203,0.66,0.138,-0.953,2,0,1,0,0,1,24.0,0,0,0,4,13,15,4,3,9,0,28,6,5,2,1,32,41,9,3,12,6,0,2,1,3,5,1,3,0,1,6,8,0,1,5,0,0,1,6,9,0,0,3,6,33,6,19,25,1,20,0,2,1,0,12,8,2,4,12,117,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017871363571098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13445358534469398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990472716126928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392724725034021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14650799205461226,0.0,0.10824529605710033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164661419250246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325519196184905,0.0,0.12007886575676635,0.0,0.0,0.2686372582250353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710119500711554,0.09685453006445224,0.0,0.14851536086059228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474460909964092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13385186147604478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346561805081751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453688312999856,0.0,0.14999322137985774,0.0,0.07450826129784771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957603580339372,0.06623490739620247,0.0,0.11971486643896838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456349885961852,0.0,0.14418513816444434,0.0,0.0,0.13008749689984891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311060182505744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882021193389594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685256817932209,0.13939328128970532,0.0,0.1455563961501455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234431196295095,0.0,0.0,0.10803541304114256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27833078238411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437196006904267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15530026024786153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687073725250627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874977619439796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559041132505494,0.0,0.0,0.09869993238749712,0.0,0.1381621123230339,0.3852332588031996,0.0,0.0,0.1746112105725599
mentalhealth,FightTheGoodFight8,2020/03/13,Mental health & Coronavirus Genuine question; if my brother was in a schizophrenia/psychosis episode which required him to be admitted to hospital for his and others safety but was also diagnosed with Coronavirus; what would they do?,21.739736842105266,13.593502973684213,17.240526315789474,39.13868421052635,45.57894736842105,20.46315789473684,69.57894736842105,15.903189008614273,10.14123157894737,195,12,23,5,1,58,35,38,0.0,0.9159999999999999,0.084,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,0,8,6,4,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,2,0,22,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3078348019030666,0.0,0.4170801924932776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3907039955200752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40917112323135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3879269938156035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312186885463075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734489306669639,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yeahtheboi,2020/03/13,"Insight into mental health through photography 

Hi guys and gals I am new to photography and I was wanting to design a photoshoot based around the realities of mental health.  I understand that this is a touchy subject for most but I feel that people will benefit from how these illnesses effect us and our lives on a daily basis.

  Yes I could’ve googled it but I wanted to see if anyone was willing to give their input on mental illnesses that I don’t know much about.  I have depression and I understand first hand how crippling that can be for me personally and I would like to know more about how you all might feel about mental illnesses that you might have, how you think they’re portrayed and how you would like them to be portrayed.

If I have offended anyone or you think this may be distasteful I am truely sorry, please reach out to me and I will delete this post. 

This is all for awareness purposes and non-profit, but if this goes against any rules please feel free to message me or remove.

Thank you for allowing me to be apart of this sub and for making me feel like this is a safe space to be in.",4.61791666666667,6.098601810185182,4.971296296296298,83.46583333333334,70.25,8.362962962962964,26.462962962962962,8.841846274778883,1.89294074074074,885,28,172,16,16,280,116,216,0.092,0.74,0.168,0.9538,0,0,0,1,0,0,11.0,2,6,2,2,9,9,1,0,5,1,25,6,1,8,2,50,41,22,0,7,8,0,5,3,0,8,5,0,0,2,14,12,0,1,12,0,1,1,1,2,0,1,2,6,28,8,29,26,5,12,0,1,1,0,15,8,0,9,5,129,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521072523978403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523034083379235,0.0,0.0,0.11154674424323807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004470553678732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792378224167687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534290021433004,0.08951689628240839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658315362789453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020260325369796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124070235660084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663836733942497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377271314897425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18365098664095145,0.0,0.11064534901308347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364110675576111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5051061121092884,0.2658545749095452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211254242540737,0.0,0.0,0.12101896985428914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686971905997264,0.1094102451637014,0.0,0.2750913863821852,0.0,0.0,0.12000618407690301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09985072311636332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14026708917304553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536269326983878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057893774166512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608908733165252,0.1507247678986209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781458556214389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17802412365158396,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,farckashkun,2020/03/13,"Does ""letting it all out"" actually help? We all know about ""repressed emotions"" but is there actually any benefit to crying when sad to your mental health instead of blocking it out or distracting yourself from feeling the sadness?",10.903846153846152,10.87503130769231,9.866282051282052,59.05788461538464,56.43589743589744,11.902564102564106,50.269230769230774,11.20814326018867,6.2646307692307674,187,12,25,4,2,59,34,39,0.35100000000000003,0.518,0.131,-0.9295,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,1,0,0,4,5,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,11,4,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,7,3,2,3,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,21,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.5704070160792252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987467572503678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32103378190193205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557586121530065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32875305573798297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14777538927007355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106586120618399,0.0,0.0,0.19589565358071312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061840039475012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988555538230359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29452924372656186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,748cupsofyogurt,2020/03/13,"hello(: hi, i don’t know where else to ask but does anyone know why someone would go completely non verbal in any emotionally stressful situation?",12.946153846153841,9.746701307692312,12.250000000000005,53.54500000000003,55.153846153846146,15.015384615384615,45.23076923076921,13.023866798666859,5.935276923076924,118,5,18,3,1,39,25,26,0.162,0.838,0.0,-0.6652,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,7,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19798964186345566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20357644139082884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27218272788506176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052616245825283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547843130838027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432155883574553,0.3275006881500175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654652972018778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200130659820248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272609274116922,0.0,0.0,0.24668753202104526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335073961198457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627144817639843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068221599197012,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,commecicommecaaa,2020/03/13,"How childhood emotional abuse destroyed my mental health – and how I’m fighting to feel better As a child, I believed that my parents hated me.

I was mostly ignored, snapped at, and shouted at.

I was given the message that I was a nuisance. A burden. The look of contempt strewed upon the faces of those who I knew were supposed to love me remains a vivid memory.

I cried myself to sleep most nights.

And when I misbehaved, I was hit with a belt.

I remember the waiting and the hiding, the trembling with fear and the crying hysterically under my bed.

I don't think my Dad hit me hard enough to leave marks. But that didn’t matter. The damage was done.

All this time spent in fear was training my brain and body to be overreactive to threat and danger as an adult. All the time spent believing I was despised was training my mind to be supremely sensitive to the slightest hints of rejection or disapproval as an adult.

What my experiences have left me with is what author William Moyers eloquently describes as a “hole in the soul”. A void in the psyche and these walls that separate me from the rest of the world.

Disconnection.

I can now logically understand that as a human being I have inherent worth. Unfortunately, the emotional brain doesn’t give a shit about this.

I’m left with thoughts that jump to negativity relentlessly, a mind driven by the assumption that the world and other people are not safe, that nothing is to be trusted.

I’m left with the exhaustion that comes from having an overactive mind. The physical fatigue this produces that makes it hard to sustain socialising.

The numerous relationship breakdowns.

It’s okay though.

It’s far from optimal, but it’s okay.

I accept it.

It’s okay because I have free will and I use my free will to cope and to change.

I’ve learned how to recognize the array of “cognitive distortions” and stories my mind conjures up and how to step back from them and deconstruct them.

I’ve learned to distance myself from the thoughts and stories quite simply by focusing my attention externally – by practicing the hugely beneficial process of getting the hell out of one’s head.

I’ve learned to remind myself that my emotions do not reflect reality.

I’ve learned how to stop myself from spiraling; how to cultivate the balance between expressing and controlling my sadness and shame so that they do not cause an unhealthy amount of stress in my body.

I’ve learned to practice relaxation techniques that calm down my exhausted, trigger-happy nervous system.

I’ve learned to remind myself that I deserve to take up space. That my emotions matter. That in relationships it’s okay to express my feelings and my needs.

I’ve learned to choose to invest in people who respect me and treat me well, for I’ve learned – repeatedly, with the same lesson again and again – that I will not heal by going back to what hurt me. 

And with this, things are so much better than they were in the past.

I’m still learning and growing, and I always will be.

I honestly can’t stress the benefits of developing mental wellbeing skills enough. Without these skills, it’s so easy to spiral deeper and deeper into stuckness and negativity. It’s so easy to needlessly suffer and to double that suffering by beating oneself up about it.

I hate to think about the amount of distress happening right now due to childhood trauma. Research shows it’s disturbingly common.

The Adverse Childhood Experiences Study (ACE Study), one of the largest scale investigations into childhood trauma, found that a whopping two thirds – 11,078 out of 17,337 people surveyed – had experienced some form of abuse or parental dysfunction.

I find it astonishing that despite reading about psychology obsessively since I was 14 and studying it at university, I only reached a comprehensive understanding of my mental health in my late twenties. 

Self-education has been a godsend for me as therapy was always unaffordable.

Why is mental health, something that impacts us daily – something with such widespread ripple effects - not considered significant enough to be a school subject?

It’s absolutely absurd.",6.893397523349773,8.65983460982265,6.730146657571628,71.91758119949627,65.11186903137789,9.567520201490188,35.924257529646354,9.851270322608157,3.858193430580334,3311,160,528,72,52,1045,350,733,0.175,0.708,0.11699999999999999,-0.9913,4,0,2,0,5,0,74.0,1,0,4,12,25,54,10,10,49,4,42,16,8,12,2,106,77,49,0,1,10,3,4,0,0,4,7,1,1,4,49,40,0,5,28,3,6,6,12,34,1,4,25,8,63,22,101,40,15,59,2,7,2,1,22,31,2,5,21,380,112,14,0.0,0.16413710568013226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11526925708326136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652212769312833,0.0,0.04222374055332233,0.0,0.0,0.15607749603696916,0.0,0.12251980261607633,0.0,0.15387720213938325,0.0,0.15464690412482598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711549754749015,0.07327394839471107,0.0596662853405976,0.0,0.0,0.07768739576184835,0.0,0.0,0.15217028385980433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07088288101503301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31165845236006223,0.0,0.21471001672080925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135510332160263,0.0,0.1558863860357035,0.07004565936798955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330761403905694,0.0,0.0,0.07594628778531058,0.0,0.0,0.036188480327785405,0.0664459910384941,0.03936530541091034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06125144822940714,0.07373464787817463,0.12409696148653575,0.1367711185046309,0.07108661279402659,0.22087866688458244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415038680038195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813475016627958,0.07334239724186807,0.2257722252470123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581657605299601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625150174174576,0.0,0.046235406551164315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27921422074251,0.0,0.27975453064548383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091827467008901,0.051359654377119014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500118686658234,0.0,0.06646232730070878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387249017192303,0.052679701969713166,0.0,0.0,0.1538227720056956,0.0,0.06612196816912158,0.14406038849240646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367262025255024,0.06928446517770719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873092452674955,0.07846455922297024,0.05915254717852935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07010060746095771,0.0,0.0,0.07225925318060744,0.0,0.07110026711835574,0.05729732009235808,0.0,0.06931574376517669,0.0,0.0,0.10664827191602727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055315694176875665,0.057909244177651385,0.15868729850994026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207920188390105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921138840506542,0.0,0.04601706716997255,0.08876535423807748,0.06805321909308039,0.1099784906609991,0.08077879774217821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766254460657127,0.1442161164665244,0.08331813376731308,0.05982334349749116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06227820155871206,0.0,0.06250153950946345,0.0,0.0,0.06676968318487644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Orestes_is_dead,2020/03/13,"Had a breakdown and suicidal thoughts. Now I'm on a spontaneous adventure to Chicago to see me cousin. It's scary as hell. I left my wife at home to take care of responsibilities by herself and that makes me sick to my stomach. She encouraged me to go, but still. I've never been so far away from home or in such a huge city. I'm hoping it helps. Have a great day everyone!",1.2437987012987008,3.4228096623376665,3.18193181818182,89.39289772727275,82.24675324675323,6.966883116883117,23.910714285714285,8.07648339933343,1.334559740259741,292,11,65,6,8,98,60,77,0.111,0.6459999999999999,0.243,0.9134,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,4,0,3,2,1,1,1,8,12,6,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,1,8,5,13,9,0,12,1,0,1,0,6,7,1,2,4,40,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23389196274005705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25381595421540537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605488894324333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378775552609958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414811444311783,0.0,0.0,0.2744626714991095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668625434961561,0.0,0.4994241383599751,0.24725849312119444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704794020630833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661726782967248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200168210577884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983768834929712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19880774797648015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27230535528661376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871756107741145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976344722733853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Desharu,2020/03/13,"I'm unphased by death and tragic events of family and friends, is there something wrong with me? I'm a 25 year old male from the US. Throughout my life I've lost family members, friends, and other close ones and I've had people close to me go through tragic events but I've never been phased by any of it. I've always seen myself as a very logical and analytical person, not emotionless for sure. Yet going through these events I've never felt anything of any significance. I've cried losing pets, I've cried from breakups, but never once felt a single modicum of emotion towards tragic events to the ***people*** close to me.  


Should I seek professional help for this issue? Is this normal? Everyone I know is emotional towards things like these but I never have been. It's a little concerning.",2.8579647058823525,5.658942153333335,3.7418431372549072,83.95111764705884,80.8,6.196078431372548,23.490196078431374,7.510576382923642,1.3509607843137257,633,22,112,10,17,202,88,150,0.171,0.732,0.09699999999999999,-0.8975,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,0,2,2,10,0,0,6,0,8,1,0,0,5,24,17,9,1,2,4,0,2,1,2,1,1,0,1,2,8,9,0,0,4,0,0,2,5,6,0,1,7,3,9,4,19,9,1,19,0,5,1,0,6,6,0,0,12,67,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485426666777845,0.0,0.0,0.1877339430971217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358915362074301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032448859928232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31053642490967065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318961632105669,0.0,0.0,0.2602498960436725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26506608306414337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21328744824177664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689433243618214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252041137950946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407028016389434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585916383549683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749658041278324,0.06743580650354843,0.1383450311421028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15442328753122225,0.15067900118611274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4258373207500263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352427420606041,0.0,0.0,0.14484210245396073,0.14700032405407334,0.0935345320321328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19138899298152706,0.1205248323025335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626431862446577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009418925691546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170279461750064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660363464832675,0.0,0.0,0.11389143612988945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509170922598314,0.0,0.08888853530877444
mentalhealth,meeawmao,2020/03/13,"I don’t know what to do right now. I’m a sappy sad bitch who is very scared. I feel like if I had a bit or more courage, I would have attempted suicide by now. I don’t want to live on, but I’m too scared to die. And it makes me very lonely cause I can’t talk to anyone about this cause they don’t understand.

I have a great family and I’m very close to them. But I can’t bring myself to actually talk to them about how empty and broken I feel. I have everything, yet I feel I have nothing. I’m happy right now and next moment I am in my room trying to muffle my cry. And I get irritated over things so easily. I snap at my friends and misbehave with them. I don’t have ANY control over my emotional transition and I’m tired of blaming period and hormones for this. 

I am a very optimistic person, but that doesn’t work much for myself. I’m too anxious to take two steps of a staircase at the same time, fearing that I might trip and get hurt. These things have gotten worse recently, I’m thinking of consulting someone professional. But then I feel like They’ll say I’m just tired and stressed from my daily life and I should just take a break from my schedule. Can anyone suggest me what I actually should do right now?",2.0602780748663143,3.73636109019608,3.6457486631016014,89.56905080213906,77.31372549019608,7.146167557932265,22.571301247771835,8.00094639256281,0.9826862745098041,958,28,212,16,22,318,132,255,0.271,0.631,0.098,-0.9945,0,2,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,5,3,13,14,1,4,7,0,25,3,0,5,0,39,48,20,2,5,8,0,4,2,1,5,3,1,1,1,11,13,0,1,7,0,0,3,7,8,0,1,2,5,36,6,26,41,4,27,0,3,0,0,13,11,1,3,14,137,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.21380607541205526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449639112200471,0.0,0.0,0.12375804936593388,0.0,0.1531970062508234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195980345848992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250719283383178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228673880849614,0.0,0.0,0.12033332523667335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369352030054597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322674624551976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845467151600634,0.0,0.1032720973377762,0.12327194715681887,0.22156302522011634,0.1565222147497621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463650687512425,0.0,0.11446860878872668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077704792047984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661587452265645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727339116349556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060204711476749974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737698646995543,0.10703923081863173,0.0,0.09673288394992982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312413531536703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162131077883898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805303788749069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165055322888934,0.0,0.0,0.10511425285150557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09565308115302906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816542613364817,0.0,0.0,0.2806601598286901,0.0,0.0871169601743525,0.21935330159124375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281965812653896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548685471414658,0.0,0.0,0.11982772289149475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16473291313921834,0.1761010527338842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555763634649688,0.07019392992077207,0.0,0.0,0.06387831509792312,0.2518186032911036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437589565023695,0.0,0.10701247024004767,0.11404332309141665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615542647816103,0.06461424397332363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975224288767083,0.0,0.11163876279672166,0.07781975043271055,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Valtteri5,2020/03/13,What is the problem with me? Lately i've been getting this sudden wave of sadness out of nowhere and everyday i want to kill myself.,2.1056410256410243,4.756979307692311,3.220769230769232,87.40756410256414,82.84615384615384,5.005128205128205,27.89743589743589,6.42735559955562,1.4229128205128196,106,5,19,1,3,34,24,26,0.366,0.634,0.0,-0.8891,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,5,3,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26016019110479144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5509118537159209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5617133228879189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4764743219874185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937059205675786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marg9,2020/03/13,"Why is ""neurosis"" considered an outdated diagnosis? For me it makes perfect sense, because some people (including me) are almost textbook examples of it's definition. There's even a BIG 5 trait called the same way. I've been listening to a lot of psychology classes lately, mainly about personality, and it struck me that what the diagnosis of ""neurosis"" actually makes sense, because some people aren't clearly depressed, or anxious, or have OCD, but you can tell that they are a mess and exhibit symptoms of all of these separate states, however not in such an extent that would warrant a ""full"" diagnosis.

So my thinking has been: okay, some people are high in neuroticism which makes them predisposed to all kinds of negative states. It's like: today one worries about his job, tomorrow it's depression about the future, next day are worries about health and possibly having a disesase, day after that it's getting into arguments with friends, next day maybe having intrusive thoughts. Does that person indeed have depression, anxiety, hypohodrisasis, and an OCD all together at the same time or is that person ""simply"" neurotic which makes them messed up and all over the place (instable, that is), so that they constantly oscillate between these distressing emotional states?

Especially considering that there is an objective trait to one's psyche called ""Neuroticism"", which meanse exactly that. Is it possible that these ""old school"" psychiatrists actually got it right in a sense that yes, neurosis is a vague diagnosis, but it also accurately describes some people, moreso that separate comorbid states?

Enlighten me please, does this make sense?

I admit I'm like that. I don't fit neatly into any of these separate diagnoses, yet I'm deeply messed up in exactly the way that a neurotic person would be.

​

*Let's remind ourselves what neurosis actually means:*

*According to* [*C. George Boeree*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/C._George_Boeree)*, professor emeritus at* [*Shippensburg University*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shippensburg_University_of_Pennsylvania)*, the symptoms of neurosis may involve:*

>*...* [*anxiety*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anxiety)*, sadness or* [*depression*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Major_depressive_disorder)*,* [*anger*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anger)*, irritability, mental confusion, low sense of self-worth, etc., behavioral symptoms such as phobic avoidance, vigilance, impulsive and compulsive acts, lethargy, etc., cognitive problems such as unpleasant or disturbing thoughts, repetition of thoughts and* [*obsession*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Obsessive%E2%80%93compulsive_disorder)*, habitual fantasizing, negativity and cynicism, etc. Interpersonally, neurosis involves dependency, aggressiveness,* [*perfectionism*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Perfectionism_(psychology))*, schizoid isolation, socio-culturally inappropriate behaviors, etc.*[*\[1\]*](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neurosis#cite_note-Boeree2002-1)

​

Note: This is X-Post from r/askpsychology , I'm posting it here in order to gain a broader audience. Link: [https://www.reddit.com/r/askpsychology/comments/fhxkyj/why\_is\_neurosis\_considered\_an\_outdated\_diagnosis/](https://www.reddit.com/r/askpsychology/comments/fhxkyj/why_is_neurosis_considered_an_outdated_diagnosis/))",13.320004402054286,18.60642202758621,9.856356077280509,40.88223037417461,57.45977011494253,12.897529958425045,40.519686965028136,11.461996868002505,7.168650281242359,2782,136,267,100,47,805,249,435,0.221,0.7040000000000001,0.076,-0.997,2,2,0,0,0,0,276.0,0,1,4,2,15,24,2,6,20,2,26,5,0,6,8,56,44,20,0,3,8,0,0,2,1,3,5,1,0,4,36,11,0,1,9,0,0,1,5,17,0,2,6,1,13,7,38,33,17,43,0,5,0,0,18,19,0,14,17,180,49,6,0.0,0.0,0.22630101630137525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740480739237011,0.0,0.0,0.0618168007233707,0.0,0.16750908594890218,0.1878559784923292,0.05256666659012957,0.0,0.11826861252467387,0.08732702377769594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424275348918568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786393294624235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353386387536554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14955636051514504,0.0,0.19973519045681884,0.07845789651975217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529154265058052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695212193925167,0.0,0.0,0.3448398373723152,0.05105593637070822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05972180626805833,0.0,0.0403860717452634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06182389014261816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082166310079894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167171870612934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670834555843238,0.0,0.0,0.0804960790424361,0.0,0.0,0.0871977932599389,0.0,0.0,0.07904451108419268,0.0,0.07552977364087272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571771555389926,0.0,0.0,0.25799182906183843,0.0,0.0776582632568796,0.08420238667668963,0.0,0.0,0.0779002423496826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16441890350650396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111337121355626,0.0,0.10476099268747104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21436041276511866,0.2699815950576789,0.0807620719008443,0.08485221284689473,0.0,0.17428832350865306,0.14806410928606867,0.0,0.0,0.0739656827235672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601379755736644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823175045377861,0.0,0.0,0.08064078283415861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24103296564753526,0.0,0.0,0.06756362752041581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04953073370699478,0.0,0.184102752065302,0.045074265229741034,0.0,0.07327138365535718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271432098715207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975124779916604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570038518330918,0.0,0.10982343744474543,0.0,0.1878559784923292,0.0
mentalhealth,idkagoodnameyet,2020/03/13,"What is the difference between Depression and Suicidal. I feel sad, tired and unhappy.
I think i might be depressed so i told someone that.
I got shut down because i said i didn't want to die and that it was just a mood.
 So my question, Whats the difference between Depression where you dont want to die vs being suicidal.",2.669739583333332,4.852919828125003,4.241875000000004,83.64895833333338,77.28125,8.641666666666666,30.979166666666664,9.2995712137729,3.1047166666666666,255,13,50,7,6,85,45,64,0.396,0.524,0.08,-0.9740000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,2,7.0,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,7,1,0,0,0,11,14,5,4,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,2,9,0,5,6,0,3,0,4,0,0,4,3,0,2,0,36,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981033370439737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4654572814257055,0.0,0.3739092021627161,0.3764113308556039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111201653927038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108308654025994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407265823878812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19109774373745853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20179556762325188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713523033150494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15263017726676714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3940830413632523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542503154076166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070419070440505,0.0,0.17212939192958404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21249988872317904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,juangui37,2020/03/13,"Help me grow up please This was my first year in college and it was alright. It could have been everything I wanted it to be but I’m a pussy. I need to learn how to assimilate into having male college student mindset. 

I don’t have the mindset I want. I want to be: The guy that sees something he’s interested in and pursues it. 
I play ‘prey’ and wait for women to come up to me and hit on me because its worked. Now, I’m unknowingly beginning to reject the women  because I don’t know how to communicate with them. 

My social skills are terrible. I don’t know how to text people consistently, say what women want to hear nor do I reply fast. 

I believe I’m a selfish person. I focus on: school, track, lift, and my body image too much. I only want to be perfect. 

I try to live up to peoples expectations of me. For instance: when people expect me to be a fuckboy. 

I don’t know ‘how to spit game’ & I have a tinder as a validation app: I smile when I get a match and feel even better when women messages me... but I never respond!

I have to much of a child’s mindset and need help growing out of it. I enjoy math, playing sports, and believe hanging with the boys is way better than pursuing punani. Either my friends prioritize women too much... or I’m just... I don’t know... different.",1.30494252873563,3.4863823295019145,3.642068965517243,86.16816091954023,82.02681992337166,5.859003831417624,23.84291187739464,7.093109894594671,1.0254429118773951,992,37,201,13,27,342,138,261,0.045,0.765,0.19,0.9863,1,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,1,6,12,12,0,0,11,1,21,2,2,4,2,42,44,20,0,10,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,10,9,13,0,1,6,4,0,4,7,3,0,1,3,4,32,9,34,35,4,23,0,1,1,0,21,9,0,2,9,137,41,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14413375831733974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621829905837408,0.0,0.0,0.2997497940540216,0.0,0.2353016067928803,0.0,0.1477620439270883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459023367837932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621054187358994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898399464868189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786250550929428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955530976180775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672620092680106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131519598231233,0.0,0.0,0.10277565950710413,0.0,0.06950066345767301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171678490268549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993011867675396,0.0,0.17832922426112394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924307325956765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746451160427347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933685393504151,0.1972743824462768,0.10259795370895572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117236768399014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27667071088655143,0.11615328730300555,0.0,0.14602274580969912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578771935121947,0.0,0.13462954739167995,0.10600460415927876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13560338907875907,0.0,0.10241001539220762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031601148382623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3923112958636925,0.10558995163184187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684460834430073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566446749950303
mentalhealth,Blackjupiter96,2020/03/13,"Why do I feel this way when I am alone in this country Hey guys,

I would appreciate your opinion on this issue. Short story: I grew up with my grandparents age 5-11 since my parents divorced when I was 5 and then moved with my mom age 11-17 to another country (who also passed away 2y ago). Then I met my husband and moved to Germany (18-24: my age now). I have dealt with anxiety since I was about 15/16, but it has gotten really bad in the last couple months, especially since breaking up with my husband because of cheating and moving to another city to start my Master's. The last couple of months were horrible because I couldn't sleep most nights til 3am due to my anxiety. Now I am visiting my dad and I am with him, his wife and my sister. Whenever visiting them, my anxiety and everything goes away 100%; I am super-confident, I don't have sleeping issues at all. I am wondering if all my anxiety comes from being alone in another country and without family. I have a lot of friends, but that doesn't really help. I am so worried that my anxiety will kick in once I go back and I am all by myself.",5.395532942393928,5.2555037309417045,6.762780269058298,77.12967575025873,67.74439461883408,10.62835460503622,32.848913418420146,10.389873798559362,3.3141544670576066,864,35,173,21,13,296,126,223,0.158,0.815,0.027000000000000003,-0.9795,2,2,0,0,1,0,30.0,0,1,1,1,8,3,1,0,3,0,21,2,2,0,3,28,28,18,0,3,4,7,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,7,14,0,0,2,0,0,9,4,2,0,0,5,1,36,1,28,19,5,41,0,0,0,0,20,11,0,5,19,120,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398670932332437,0.0,0.0,0.21962439174112489,0.0,0.08478990797484477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335362697799316,0.4055525623670966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19923207614290825,0.08152836678675987,0.08852827743723761,0.12926638554788536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913330385225777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23463414487890996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529040443971222,0.0,0.09995300142821706,0.0,0.05361053456635273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191634633795809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602576972074612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498359069021493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106779254354424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213296856275225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728526271920257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014052796209324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12417776705028588,0.16925978786682966,0.3380703798719709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949933819760357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11291550024411545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773065040875537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584746969747116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26312036923514265,0.0,0.21220752923991565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750465929591643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415945068281781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567305025195094,0.0,0.0,0.1022064305101845,0.11498196804456864,0.0,0.10767576122385042,0.0,0.0753186758733422,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zestygurl,2020/03/13,Today was really bad.....just venting/need advice Ive suffered with anxiety and a bunch of other issues my whole life....i got into a serious relationship 3 years ago and we are still together and live together. My boyfriend has only had one other gf before me and she is absolutely gorgeous....once i found out about her i kind of became obsessed. I feel so ugly compared to this girl....i dont know how to stop comparing myself to her. Its been happening for almost 3 years. I absolutely hate how i look...some days i can go without thinking about wanting to be her and look like her but other days itll be bad....ill just look at all her pictures and constantly compare myself....i know i probably aound crazy but i need help...ive become so depressed and anxious because of this whole thing. My boyfriend tells me im beautiful but i feel like hes lying to me. I literally have no idea what i look like....i feel like the image ive created myself to look like in my head is not how anyone else sees me and it makes me scared that i will never know what anyone else sees.,1.852880921895004,4.165747990610331,3.753045241143834,85.39950384122922,80.83098591549296,6.689628681177977,23.29684165599659,7.84624498591911,1.3545981220657284,834,29,164,15,22,281,128,213,0.163,0.748,0.08900000000000001,-0.9181,0,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,1,0,0,0,9,11,1,2,3,0,17,1,1,4,2,37,38,16,0,2,6,0,3,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,12,12,0,1,9,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,5,9,33,5,18,29,4,15,0,2,6,0,11,4,0,1,14,105,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453763606636116,0.09482951744616057,0.0,0.10712298596506913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183785572495117,0.12085465822671228,0.0,0.14960297068883147,0.21922314865526585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17864427619937293,0.06521277876292889,0.11814876517885048,0.09103037482370972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156051830497912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379838836730952,0.0,0.09213997047830763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537738638705198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17873273688998897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622738308286413,0.15285016906284216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11729582453631032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060798046763643074,0.0,0.08556005678668578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460026728918093,0.0,0.0,0.10561859957595614,0.10979026235936093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170507959464939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076510892035755,0.11555456721079295,0.11165720895901032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140109556497592,0.1763768869929344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07556170529796259,0.26132016712677697,0.0,0.09446350915313467,0.0,0.4491727667078194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140862696964227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932281068291136,0.08250800694536095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139280487361844,0.07249104240037724,0.08136156827483218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534034740732108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853282815433216,0.0,0.0,0.11485430647860526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071036123732244,0.0,0.1704951863080005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543274658290764,0.08943837470099422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935034627233254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107141104385492,0.06854716484000949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140260879620397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630983795557701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23887417054188104,0.0,0.1031229474353994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13778061304165526
mentalhealth,manami_hanatsuki,2020/03/13,"Maybe I was born just to watch everyone else succeed... I have had this thought / feeling for as long as I can remember ...  
Frankly , I was never noticed anywhere , and I never accomplished something worthy of being noticed ...  
I spend my whole teenage life and early adulthood trying so hard to prove myself at anything but nothing seems to work ...  
Back at school , teachers told my parents that I won't amount to anything . I barely had any friends and I wish from time to time that the conversation would be initiated on their part as well ...  
Maybe a simple "" good morning "" or "" hey how are you "" even once a month will do .  


I am always the person making effort to keep friendships ,  to be something but I am always forgotten, or go unnoticed . I was even wrote down as absent in many classes where I was sitting in the front row right in front of the professor .  
And tbh , I am just tired . I spent my whole life like this , no one asks about my well-being or cares about what happens to me .  
Also from high school fast forward a little less than a decade and here I am still struggling ...Maybe my teachers were right back then .  
What really hurts me is that I am trying , no sleep , day and night just to not seem that less than everyone else around me , thinking that someday I'll get my moment to shine , but I waited 23 years for it ... I was always been either the nobody , or if I was mentioned , my inadequate self pops out first ...  
Also during all of that emotional turmoil , I picked up drawing .Because every time I tell the one close friend what is wrong with me , they all answer "" we don't need you in our lives "", and cut me off . I needed a medium to tell  through my art , what I was feeling , and maybe lessen my load ...  
Back in 2012-2013 when I was still 13 , I thought maybe I could make this my success story , and improve , and I really came to like what I was doing .I LOVE iit actually , i would always get new ideas , experiment and just have a blast ...  
But the reality reflects otherwise... My "" getting ignored"" in real life , transferred to my art account ...and I was reluctant about doing it full time because "" if i couldn't get my art seen by others after 10 years of constantly trying , practicing and improving  , i won't be able to sustain myself economically wise....  
please do not misunderstand my point , I don't want fame and a lot of money , I just want to feel validated somewhere , and that my work matters , and maybe not so lonely ... I want that when I interact with others , they's interact with me , I want feedback and maybe a nice comment every once in a while .  
I JUST WANT TO SEE MY HARD WORK PAYING OFF , BUT I ALWAYS GO UNNOTICED...

PLEASE HELP , I am having suicidal thoughts because of it .

I envy people who go and live to their fullest while I am in that room working all day but never reap the results because nothing works out , not in my major field ( my professors don't see good results so they think I am wasting time and having fun and ask me to work more while I often skip meals for work ) , and I don't even have an audience art wise to be able to assess my work...  
Maybe I was born to watch others be fulfilled and satisfied.",5.694667411212863,6.04519265123967,6.000250167522896,81.16730399821311,67.11570247933885,8.590127317400045,30.566227384409203,8.358175599149588,2.1483674335492515,2434,86,471,31,37,780,282,605,0.076,0.8109999999999999,0.113,0.9744,1,2,2,0,0,0,112.0,2,2,5,13,30,22,1,2,18,0,53,7,1,6,7,101,94,50,1,14,23,1,5,2,2,5,4,0,1,2,24,31,1,3,15,4,5,7,16,7,1,3,23,11,85,15,66,58,14,71,0,2,6,1,29,29,0,10,38,334,109,20,0.1132933947605427,0.0,0.05527900525880988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060068685822986,0.2356729504634988,0.0,0.0,0.03852169671660753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932308106650851,0.05042757046570461,0.10591403061699807,0.0,0.0,0.13067344108042114,0.0,0.13812520378950927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06478873095065962,0.05775508328366255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06121495576014758,0.0,0.04522777847442946,0.0,0.0,0.07306486709184902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464209383154068,0.06371991011578185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224382811582724,0.0,0.09545457138980636,0.1082566937754694,0.0,0.0554113396869207,0.0,0.0,0.0859268167148401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04818365185368004,0.0,0.0,0.08753019575557845,0.0,0.1183822454999123,0.0,0.09658087063458484,0.09502512435643606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05009248741478296,0.0,0.10148862861486772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03796908719286225,0.05985034590175716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06064146114044255,0.06394722628262335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035018739011034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003371280465552,0.05534943000958786,0.056774872396396336,0.10004014320477096,0.05013054461392952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04815899640763865,0.051125856020420885,0.0,0.07562422074029021,0.05743086009287185,0.4552737708168394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04521485340791561,0.0,0.0,0.08400561667954991,0.13106827553336092,0.054709733317779854,0.0,0.05315908813886582,0.0,0.10870806781249437,0.1289852808384424,0.0,0.1206537679235665,0.07677053634584577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289945375612319,0.061342853082472115,0.0,0.039271687479110674,0.04946171118747849,0.0,0.12436212607914772,0.053549438855051534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447634315906474,0.0725786497267748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641696655181466,0.09675194010091136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465896394334618,0.09028016747888556,0.10313805158766803,0.05909485955326984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05668760694765765,0.0,0.0,0.0872187903011425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047625140281347,0.0,0.0,0.05921942741847576,0.0,0.061962292802991766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902342062922427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725938327757754,0.0,0.13491345066730953,0.16515572391554725,0.06510704557280411,0.0,0.0541283468877347,0.0,0.11537816740299205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670584489010263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186436787946282,0.0,0.0,0.12648802930976896,0.06514090638755002,0.0,0.0,0.3299157628139775,0.0,0.0,0.08048037709159551,0.061934271037794385,0.0,0.07295723175593527
mentalhealth,ClassicPerformer0,2020/03/13,"How to get emergency help? Ive been really struggling lately. I keep having these horrible repetitive thoughts that literally cause me to scream and jerk every couple of seconds. It’s been three days not of this essentially extended panic attack and it will not a stop.The only reprieve I get is sleep. 
I don’t know what to do
I haven’t been able to find a therapist, even after calling several and regardless they wouldn’t be able to help me for probably at least a couple weeks 
I tried going to a local psychiatric hospital out of desperation yesterday. They had me answer basic questions and took my blood pressure. All the while I’m jerking around and yelling every couple seconds, trying to maintain composure. I end up waiting for about three hours before they finally call me into a room and the intake nurse tells me that they suggest I go to therapy. I didn’t even get to see a doctor or anything.
I immediately started crying and having one of the worst panic attacks I’ve ever experienced when I realize that they won’t help me. The nurse was frightened by my panic attack and quickly left the room, locking me inside all alone. 
How the fuck does a person work in a mental hospital and run away when someone’s having a panic attack!!? Three hours of twitching and screaming in their waiting room only to have you suggest that I go to therapy?!?! OF COURSE I NEED TO GO TO THERAPY BUT I NEED HELP NOW!! They didn’t even try to set up an appointment they just gave me a phone number to call
If I can’t get help at a mental hospital, where else can I go?
I’m thinking about going to the emergency room, because I am out of ideas. I hear they can possibly give you some meds but it really depends upon who is working. Also I live in America so this is ridiculously expensive even with my health insurance (I’m really curious how much I’ll get charged for the mental hospital visit, my guess is at least $100-200)
Any suggestions??",4.978198653198653,6.384417756684492,6.218639334521687,75.14970192117251,69.29411764705881,9.49795999207764,30.696771637948107,9.816601858774405,3.170682036046742,1547,63,271,37,27,520,196,374,0.14400000000000002,0.8059999999999999,0.051,-0.9754,0,1,0,0,1,0,36.0,0,2,9,2,19,17,8,6,20,0,27,6,2,5,3,47,57,22,0,5,7,0,0,0,0,3,3,4,4,1,12,15,0,3,8,0,1,9,9,17,0,6,10,6,42,0,45,43,7,48,0,0,1,1,31,21,1,6,17,191,54,3,0.14548633901298347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533998541665213,0.0,0.05817268637295817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049467849733986116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598614303841118,0.06475684330830685,0.0,0.3310234274342106,0.06834460231006012,0.0,0.0,0.044343560953468496,0.0,0.06189907946242775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22283672772016055,0.0,0.0,0.07472727311141984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24146680038520899,0.07990495594679019,0.046913326439422184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445571638191052,0.06365803784269969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060767583923037174,0.0,0.06442885686614204,0.0,0.0,0.19218470960746725,0.06580036144367145,0.12257851539278808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968658653632682,0.06648593907530277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724988804093447,0.1900265185177065,0.06978187662005343,0.24804971758523026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013480234884646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773225875614398,0.08198683884634107,0.0,0.2437910657999876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432747379365076,0.0,0.0,0.08211818404380508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06465747140411444,0.0,0.0,0.039977743562535584,0.0,0.08205746367276381,0.0,0.07903566651244467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423355139087812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080126254801978,0.0,0.21992401645944096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05347459952362942,0.1078762769274193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049292654265622717,0.11064891668489207,0.0,0.341393744097702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06351652977822114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820069937565082,0.0,0.0,0.07842944009860597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814889979036928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980341124350767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05796688800676888,0.0,0.0,0.08217907602234073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727957037535431,0.0,0.061635051462343014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148798978373356,0.0,0.0,0.06081654693094031,0.0,0.07604695500359163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358073643365675,0.0,0.2495644618822745,0.08446042647633681,0.0,0.046610885779311884,0.0,0.057749951097271414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808203378900338,0.14816351132356215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058350182777763535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591578753538683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,illitill,2020/03/13,"Test help online Recently I tried to pay for “text support” mental health. 
I had to go through a whole questionnaire about my employment status and sexuality....
I wasn’t matched to anyone but the crisis line... wtf?
I would have happily given someone 100’s of dollars to talk to me... where are we at that an app said I was not worthy of a 24/7 paid therapist?",2.6116149068323007,5.057852811594207,4.158633540372673,82.8039130434783,78.85507246376811,7.421118012422363,25.799171842650104,8.418075326091056,2.011665010351968,280,11,53,6,7,93,58,69,0.201,0.687,0.11199999999999999,-0.8368,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,6,1,0,0,0,5,11,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,6,1,8,1,11,4,1,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,35,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20620534780713973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676020512315629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134716154807126,0.0,0.0,0.1976694822204778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971961962506267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29118440186851274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805234322360154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24987315817367556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33465618407289044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23703451990922236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3424089540548512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002220253039992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292523617140169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094929802736357,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Babycatzzz,2020/03/13,"I have been battling poor motivation for a while and i'm not sure how to change. Any advice welcome. Hi everyone. I'm new to r/mentalhealth. I'm not sure really how I should even start this but I've been struggling with motivating myself to do things since I graduated highschool 4 years ago.  I used to be a great student and had no issue completing things on time in addition to participating in theater and choir outside of school. Now I can rarely motivate myself to even do things I enjoy like painting and drawing. I procrastinate horribly to the point that it impacted my grades badly in my first year of college. I know I should get up and clean or work on homework for college but I just can't make myself until I ABSOLUTELY have to (ex: school projects due the next day, dishes becoming moldy).It's really embarrassing and I hate it. I'm not sure what changed from highschool to now but does anyone have any advice for changing my behavior patterns?",4.315310773480661,6.66244733701658,5.185410911602208,78.03458045580109,72.86740331491713,8.502900552486187,30.09703038674032,9.188382445141503,2.902030110497237,772,34,137,18,16,251,114,181,0.182,0.695,0.124,-0.8613,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,5,7,12,2,2,4,0,13,1,0,7,3,29,23,14,0,2,8,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,2,0,8,8,1,0,4,1,1,0,5,5,0,1,3,1,18,7,23,17,0,21,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,15,89,26,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626934113625273,0.11914890355842993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18281072824323602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398460736014158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222913608217663,0.0,0.14844846000439488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42657299728582143,0.0,0.1409293419832829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668518458779141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762561258614936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17755687233974338,0.0,0.0,0.128437262070069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433152269474499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022517942978605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819066905705014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270488634508532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14029211979712775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386980082507381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566734120214965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972163770501485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981679212360206,0.14294961729902725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706361282741968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722166589529045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720660106472071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118771907209199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951381246482387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051752097217088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3800476315457742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26789382446347104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837722825309378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608956754051496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785417375084117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17311496902683216
mentalhealth,ineedjesus6969,2020/03/13,"death is it not normal to not care if anybody loves you or cares for you like I know people do but I just don’t care and feel bad they’d waste any thought into me, I seek no approval no validation, I seek nothing from no one. I don’t converse with people it just bores me. One of the things that’s also held me back from suicide is that I can’t stand the thought of cringey my funeral would be and the reaction of the people who knew, they probably wouldn’t care but that’s me being optimistic, death is usually an emotional thing.",5.80593939393939,5.142590927272725,6.256363636363638,82.86121212121216,67.0,9.87878787878788,31.96969696969697,9.2995712137729,2.485151515151514,422,15,91,7,6,137,68,110,0.33,0.562,0.109,-0.9869,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,2,2,1,4,8,0,0,5,0,12,1,0,0,0,21,23,7,4,4,8,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,9,2,0,2,4,1,15,6,9,14,0,4,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,2,3,65,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921087381148044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987603441113568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12424062915677918,0.1349077544474311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6589428876903918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18174929022629766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169679838400243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879698533447378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893701984508282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582707394029984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583084650048573,0.15503485590997101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21897379431007452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360457341676101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17420437527528115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17673601104073997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146855118635025,0.0,0.0,0.2565438218207303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779512154815513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477771537156845,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,William_Targaryen,2020/03/13,"Hi everyone. I'm not sure what else to do and I'm not feeling well. So before I start I just want to say I hope everyone is having a nice day and that I don't often post on Reddit at all. But I'm feeling strange and I wanted to seek out some good advice or maybe I just want to share what I've been feeling or thinking. I don't really know. But anyway, I've been having some glaring issues with my mental health and well being. I have self-esteem issues now, I have audible and visual hallucinations, I have frequent mood swings, I have anxiety that has progressively gotten worse over the past couple years. I feel hopeless. No matter how much medicine I take or how many times I hear ""It's going to be okay"" I feel no hope. My psychiatrist says I have Bipolar disorder and I've taken many medications for it and nothing seems to help. But recently, I've noticed not just problems with my mood but it's as if I don't ""think"" right. I'm not sure if that makes sense. But I dissociate a lot and deconstruct reality. I hope that makes sense. As I've been typing this I've been very hesitant to go into detail. But as of right now I feel a sense of clarity. And I feel like sharing this with this site is a step forward. Due to my age I can't be prescribed certain anxiety medications. And that makes me feel worse. I just feel so disconnected from life and the people around me. Isolation makes me happy. I've been experiencing an extreme lack of motivation and lack of personal hygiene. I just get so scared of the possibilities of what could happen. All of this is just getting worse. Every hour feels like a day and nothing that anyone says makes me feel better. I don't understand what is happening to me and there are times I think and plan self harm. Just a couple weeks ago I wan in the hospital for hurting myself and it's only gotten worse since. I don't know where to go from here. I hope whoever reading this is doing well and thank you for reading.",2.7366521264994543,4.724525638676852,4.342323518720466,83.92960305343514,76.32824427480917,7.341301344965467,24.20567066521265,8.238735603445708,1.4847835550708837,1548,51,310,28,35,518,183,393,0.16699999999999998,0.705,0.128,-0.9008,0,1,0,0,0,2,39.0,0,1,0,4,23,27,0,1,11,1,31,5,0,8,5,92,79,36,0,13,22,0,11,2,0,0,5,5,0,2,19,23,0,0,19,2,0,5,12,5,3,0,8,17,40,20,35,67,8,33,0,2,0,0,11,12,0,14,19,200,59,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188388462547139,0.06520822880346787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254937839217848,0.0,0.0,0.05143622473822253,0.0,0.0,0.06548573013567711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259580001490596,0.0,0.0,0.06505956543227714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058733230025962736,0.16278979352001868,0.0,0.09488274221003727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430836600169074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061451568644802286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061979114247639376,0.14058318829344316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4091464455339261,0.10510534130427658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686616378767486,0.0,0.12542085157456714,0.061700272214648924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301011760977148,0.07830806197571473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819291126241748,0.08290966219287628,0.0,0.04930702340896583,0.0,0.0,0.29225445214847035,0.07244370127107817,0.0,0.07874958723178857,0.0,0.0,0.1535591243199046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085544608483661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05195897965680566,0.07187730448438873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253973794951102,0.0,0.0,0.24551585895296826,0.1491605393941948,0.07390286458932191,0.0,0.0,0.14821184785443445,0.07413314205599295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05407649623755825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411693469781843,0.08375076584549411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594717660444062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022320347821792,0.05099859272377018,0.06423145594679919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293004396166986,0.07045201218904112,0.0,0.0,0.07038884988317436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14716371066297834,0.0,0.0471256678214529,0.0,0.07263354948864785,0.0,0.0,0.125643004036065,0.0,0.17549824184040255,0.0736483433576084,0.0,0.0,0.06696803505121234,0.15348231094111647,0.0,0.0,0.06085120390413961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05206752571544139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866253163854386,0.0,0.055309430317052204,0.0,0.0,0.06772595874891718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140657874550872,0.0,0.0,0.08578912739055193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658058261033808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06069631147987845,0.13016622931367572,0.0,0.0590069578370244,0.0,0.19842307820280086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998636400665789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04737148296153268
mentalhealth,totalllost,2020/03/13,Rather disproportionate between genders I've noticed that there are far more men posting and men reaching out to help on this sub and suicide watch. This is rather surprising seeing that there was a supposed norm or expectation that it would be more balanced. Any views on this?,6.610918367346938,9.143214530612248,5.322193877551023,78.72369897959184,66.95918367346938,7.348979591836735,34.69897959183673,8.07648339933343,2.800342857142857,228,11,37,3,4,67,39,49,0.083,0.795,0.122,0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,6,3,1,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,7,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,5,3,2,5,0,0,3,0,3,4,0,1,0,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29099415091264985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868197205823478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48717950501944707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4098204485580559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409896619175153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4680651767613905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039756941287861,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,909an285,2020/03/13,"I sometimes see things in the corner of my eye and tend to be paranoid. Should I be worried about this? sometimes I’ll randomly see a scary horror movie-like figure in the corner of my eye, and when I turn my head to see what it actually is it ends up just being a random piece of furniture or object. like for a split second my mind thinks it sees a ghost or a demon trying to kill me, but then I realize nothing’s there. I don’t *think* I’ve ever had a hallucination, because I only ever see these figures in the corner of my eye, and it always ends up being something else. Maybe I’m just really paranoid? I have pretty severe anxiety and my whole life i’ve struggled with various mental health issues. I’ve also been through some trauma. I smoke weed regularly so that could also be an explanation for the paranoia. i’ve never done any other drugs. I don’t ever watch scary movies so that’s not why. I’m just wondering, should I be worried about these figures that I see in the corner of my eye sometimes? am I hallucinating? or is this normal for someone who’s paranoid?",3.206966408268733,5.0227402418604665,4.984612403100776,80.59976098191215,74.48837209302326,7.010335917312663,24.967700258397933,7.793537801064563,1.4729483204134368,852,28,159,12,18,290,118,215,0.187,0.7829999999999999,0.03,-0.9825,0,0,3,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,0,0,14,4,1,1,12,0,18,8,5,0,4,32,31,14,2,4,8,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,15,5,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,3,11,20,1,21,19,4,18,1,0,11,0,1,10,0,7,9,114,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.10974898554479737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987540524289553,0.09357935119353893,0.0,0.0,0.07647961674270996,0.0,0.08603492236920278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855722585407376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979363472215132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509008011258935,0.0,0.0,0.13042294464246887,0.0,0.093949535987641,0.0,0.1992200714925396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051913385242431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542087234944665,0.11954434838089795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738356558408025,0.0,0.0,0.12442514383513728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943689863091984,0.05494440217940539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298555902545745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133376161269971,0.0,0.1135569367483108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673944239496394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019118769243773,0.1079125800753705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553420844612375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441667886877488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204754447399593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5377171721469981,0.0,0.0,0.1270527074100942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952906815053786,0.08658055360420285,0.33369036306133176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757216059320595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471631896586338,0.14412523283747558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635591346848103,0.1223289213291409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148158605148604,0.12556243401372855,0.0,0.0,0.12196279363682325,0.0,0.2284260196475677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sprinklecutiepie,2020/03/13,"I feel like my partners mental health is causing a rift in the relationship. Hey y’all I just wanted to express my concerns here because I’m not sure who I can talk to. My partners mental health has been not great since this semester started. It started with mental breakdowns, self-doubt and a lot of stress. Now he’s very cold,distant and stoic. He’s aware that he is but whenever he gets like this it feels like I’m having a long distance relationship. It just feels like a lack of connection. It’s disheartening and my anxiety makes me think that if these issues continue that our relationship won’t last. He’s been like this all week. Not sure how long it will last. This all started because his classes that he’s taking are starting to get extremely challenging for him and they’re a main part of his major. He switched majors and that made him stress about the time for graduation, financial aide, drop limits etc. Nowadays it seems like anything will set him off. He’s frustrated with his parents because his mom wants him to drop everything for me. I make it clear that I don’t want that but his mom pushes him anyway. I can’t do much about it unfortunately. And last but not least he’s just a bit spooked by the Coronavirus but obviously it’s not the main issues he’s having. I have no power over anything he feels I just try my best to offer support, doesn’t seem like he wants it right now, but regardless I always offer support and wait around until he’s out of an episode. I’ve tried suggesting a counselor but I doubt he’ll visit one. He’s probably too busy since you have to make appointments for an individual session. Unless it’s an emergency. I feel like I could use a counselor as well but again it takes about two weeks to see them. Maybe when I feel less overwhelmed I’ll make an appointment but I’m just trying to cope with these feelings because I just can’t do much for him anymore. I feel lost and hopeless on what I could do to make things better. If anyone can offer any words of advice I would appreciate that.",3.8381266530643066,5.72362566084788,4.480262978916347,84.58450389178569,72.94014962593515,7.4541222700823715,26.864732109121128,8.199878495009871,1.7264839567747303,1634,59,318,26,33,521,197,401,0.121,0.748,0.13,0.7737,2,0,0,0,0,1,32.0,1,2,1,6,20,25,1,4,16,0,25,2,0,9,6,75,64,23,0,11,22,3,8,8,2,5,2,0,0,2,29,13,0,2,11,0,0,2,11,8,1,2,4,9,39,17,35,53,16,30,0,4,1,0,47,7,0,6,26,198,68,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300779632464086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06216644961335925,0.0,0.0,0.05080678782279238,0.0,0.057154549569302826,0.0,0.07409432430356362,0.052240435237496434,0.0,0.122963379595006,0.06650960605183846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821752030690817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840573623977735,0.06607677822083459,0.08156625946116626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674990382570307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930305986007772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332373720227114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671464151556587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30221344798565386,0.2134973475781093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806797391801709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237035049804597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883093044346874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559600365304309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827009917907078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920044532095866,0.0,0.0,0.13223570926162712,0.0,0.0,0.08155707930400875,0.06351755298428087,0.0,0.07069439247154302,0.24935452387274226,0.0,0.07505834324141249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258766633576645,0.0,0.0,0.17500380963828244,0.0,0.0,0.10984397528964147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05062685036772774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295894193516011,0.08090592021254968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08055227675304874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24063849528053816,0.0,0.06380372246209079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059535868155677726,0.13603017390487215,0.07794101108340558,0.0,0.0,0.12360523708170372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21152642667360672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711649089569925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16956480417994468,0.1408305341380887,0.0,0.1123483975430128,0.060050753377890995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04963539732906078,0.047872494898336136,0.0,0.0,0.04356522447298813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521738285245158,0.0,0.07298286249832872,0.0,0.0,0.06452726361467137,0.0,0.061645304358102726,0.17626852170631446,0.0,0.11985907500540555,0.0,0.06717514760095585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05307332998429662,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pgxpg5naf,2020/03/13,"When I get sick people can't find anything wrong and it's getting to me. Every time I'm sick in some way, from abdominal pain (which is the current problem) to constant nightmares (also current problem) no one can give me a diagnosis or reason for why I'm having these problems. I went to a gastroenterologist and got an upper and lower endoscopy for the abdominal pain, (during ""flairups"" I have diarrhea or very inconsistent and painfull stool) and they found nothing. Absolutely nothing. I was throwing up last Saturday, 3-7-20, and it was only bile, pure bile until i had water and somehow that flushed out my system. The next day I had no problems keeping down water or crackers. I have gotten off my diet of water and crackers and I'm getting abdominal pains and heartburn now. Tuesday I ate only strawberries, cornflakes and apple sauce and that was ok, Wednesday I tried burgers, I was tired afterwards but I was fine, yesterday I had probably the healthiest thing you can get at a chinese place, chicken fried rice, and now I'm in pain. I heard some foods can cause nightmares, but I'd say I've had diverse meals this week and every day this week I've been met with creepy bathrooms and tall rollercoaster dreams and jumpscare dreams where I watch creepy videos.


All my life I've had random pains or issues that no one can explain and my parents are always telling me or gossiping behind my back that i'm faking. I've never faked being ill in my life, but all i hear from everyone is ""the boy who cried wolf"" or that im just overreacting. I don't know how to prove it to them and get help, I don't understand any of this.",7.868406549520768,7.0514971725239635,7.797841453674124,73.99887080670928,62.897763578274756,10.253115015974442,37.134384984025566,9.354420925462401,3.3839650159744403,1297,55,236,19,16,418,178,313,0.135,0.804,0.061,-0.9594,4,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,2,0,9,15,0,0,9,1,25,19,0,3,5,52,48,31,0,4,10,1,0,0,0,0,12,3,0,1,15,20,7,1,7,3,0,2,7,13,0,2,18,4,29,2,22,29,4,37,0,0,1,0,15,12,0,10,21,146,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962959595732767,0.08285386115381317,0.0,0.0,0.06771399316064977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194123070669057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656655209740941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10229031760206547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760453066661173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937778111599716,0.12843447543182254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16779142003512793,0.09514758755091852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100917965980196,0.0,0.12040573591825303,0.10917816844722956,0.0,0.0,0.2601175196505394,0.09552081890758277,0.0,0.0,0.07963872822531375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222756345300078,0.0,0.06674260818281036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755741778243112,0.10392978280570092,0.0,0.08850628438444391,0.0,0.0,0.05472347532243566,0.08116640996678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14066465915207554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679790065960318,0.0,0.1058984831046094,0.0,0.0,0.1910886068834342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494835420426474,0.15146160643579573,0.529770805819297,0.0,0.11056556549894933,0.0,0.0,0.06903233772206141,0.0,0.10403403409567798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735802342307822,0.3811169365650336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237904704657057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791855438441534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703239730793909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615279373671358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058062621913733826,0.1144461021813274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760446799535942,0.0,0.0,0.10366044158008804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215929202708099,0.0,0.07903750828284463,0.1597451232986012,0.0,0.0,0.09230644813883668,0.08985039042415481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886895341904797,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heatherrsherr,2020/03/13,"He said he loved me but wants to be my friend- I feel like giving up. Someone please come talk to me, I don’t think I’ve ever felt worse.",-1.4498387096774188,0.4867794193548427,0.37443548387096826,106.18165322580644,93.51612903225808,3.1,14.201612903225806,3.1291,-1.6959741935483872,106,2,28,0,4,34,26,31,0.10099999999999999,0.51,0.39,0.8979,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,7,10,1,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,5,3,3,7,0,3,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,0,2,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586772553283624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271633707590327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183800038451878,0.2145305614937264,0.2883299612367309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23200690549666064,0.0,0.0,0.28806999616776324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670879993673586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27102765037309323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296333543361209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28564898363581964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544386866410909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413654686846547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19241668952141375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771215678522184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30602590827807125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DaGreat99,2020/03/13,DOES MENTAL HEALTH AND PHYSICAL HEALTH MATTERS WITH WOMEN? i was a watching a video earlier today and i've learned alot from it. Its about mental health and physical health and i think you guys should watch it. Here is the link :  [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZFJK5GxCT0&t=73s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZFJK5GxCT0&t=73s),14.12022727272727,19.724201477272736,5.5420000000000025,71.00300000000003,56.95454545454545,7.156363636363636,24.70909090909091,8.238735603445708,1.892041818181819,291,7,34,4,5,66,32,44,0.0,0.941,0.059000000000000004,0.3341,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,3,4,0,0,0,11,4,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,3,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,1,21,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39635592031555744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160061776931133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18110513494752045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7776796886249928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3686513131440768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719841602102288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17337296384252476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Why_Is_It_Always_Me,2020/03/13,"I think I might be depressed? For the last few months I’ve been questioning the fact that I could be depressed. I googled some symptoms and found 3/4 I identify with, found an online test that said I could be depressed and recommended help. 


But I don’t know why I would be depressed. 

I don’t have any motivation to do anything. Sure, I get up and go to school, but I don’t do anything else. Nothing outside of school. 

I’m scared about the unknown of my future - where do I go to college? What job do I want? Where do I want to live? 

I have trouble sleeping. A lot. I either sleep very little or wayyy too much. My mom suggested this is because I don’t exert much energy (which I have no motivation to)

I hate my body. I’m super tall, slightly overweight (I have a slightly fat belly/chest) and I have stretch marks all over my upper legs, stomach and underarms. I’m hairy too. I can’t find any clothes for myself (I JUST got a 2nd pair of jeans after 3 years of wearing the same ones to school everyday) and the clothes I REALLY want to wear... my parents and friends wouldn’t find acceptable. Plus I don’t have the right body type. I hate it.

I want to be a feminine guy, but the above paragraph displays why I can’t/never will achieve that). 

I eat whenever I’m bored. This + no exercise contributes to my overweight. 

I DONT have any “end it now” thoughts. I’m too much of a coward to do that/think that.

I get randomly really sad. Is this just being a teenage guy? 

I can’t express my emotions. I was raised to subscribe to the notion that “men” aren’t supposed to show emotion. 

I constantly doubt my friendships & I have little self worth. Due to the fact that nobody starts a conversation with ME without prompting/needing something/having no choice I don’t think I have any good friends. But I tolerate it because I don’t think I’m worth much/I think it’s normal. 

I am afraid of forming a lasting friendship. I’ve moved from place to place since I was 5, never staying in the same place for more than a year or so. I was homeschooled in the middle of nowhere until 6th grade, when I was enrolled in public school. Then I moved after making friends. Rinse and repeat until high school. But I can’t make any friends that are good for ME. 

I think I’m depressed.",1.8132548964351152,4.129645916114793,2.860326898689589,91.72232633507116,81.00883002207506,5.621323563947208,25.090836503687004,6.855684769269737,0.9530355455356724,1772,70,366,20,47,564,213,453,0.133,0.728,0.139,-0.5196,3,0,1,0,0,0,67.0,0,0,0,4,11,22,2,3,21,0,48,14,9,4,5,60,79,21,0,9,11,2,0,0,4,4,5,1,0,4,16,11,4,0,15,2,2,4,18,13,0,1,10,1,57,9,42,57,12,43,0,6,0,0,17,18,0,8,20,227,73,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726740632824959,0.0,0.2424758014607137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736874262395892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694326144867481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584249244770227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706381974044628,0.0,0.11387496157869853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071081195715976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357808922718113,0.0,0.0,0.07297081401921561,0.05957270709685365,0.16043463908657776,0.06316198819971043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035724374392108,0.0,0.0,0.15638164379671485,0.22038441893133895,0.0,0.07451600605103911,0.0,0.08105743346034301,0.11962761327331267,0.05703537349490322,0.0,0.0,0.14122179922511707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081328369947266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04779947734675891,0.07534590543605503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707669661195476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03919165867546025,0.11625892604910433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294835233683675,0.06297052302829527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062760598211885,0.0,0.0,0.09520371684946216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565162829184799,0.0,0.08352070819498718,0.05692120935725251,0.15158847522853378,0.20969250043426813,0.05287754945330253,0.055000839985195366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698714185232331,0.06842657025726549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483234097032971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918444285130243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235201436432198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988667461061336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913696319811843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06090075520669716,0.06783481847463131,0.0,0.07139656942479711,0.3608618849443344,0.0,0.0,0.07439481982220085,0.0,0.0,0.058990698311146235,0.0,0.14272863450064271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504755782009845,0.07600997337056026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672114851156844,0.07412132100055073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274166237996819,0.0,0.05661441017521077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05884054167193387,0.16824858608305832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869744885945175,0.0,0.0,0.06874300980815312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0506585784128557,0.0,0.0,0.09184623082684072
mentalhealth,TooDamnHotAZ,2020/03/13,"Groundhog Day Hey all, thanks for taking the time to read this!

So a little back ground about me: I'm 27, m and live in western US. 

I have never been clinically diagnosed with depression and/or anxiety, and I also don't want to label myself either.I do however am well aware that I'm not alright. 

At some poing in my life, i went from outgoing extrovert to shutting everything off and just downward spiral or sadness, anxiety and loneliness. while everything was goint south, my relationship with the right girl at the wrong time just fell apart and that tore me down. Ever since then, I've been living day by day. I have thought about killing myself several times, and have attempted time or two, but can't even be strong enough to go through it. Theses days I have friends but I had sad realization that I am none of my best freinds' best friend.  And fear, I'll never know that feeling either.   


I thought getting a job and being successful would help me fill the void. But I found out that, once I got the job and got where I wanted to be, the void was still there. I recently intentionally worked 20+ days in a row, just to avoid being home. Right after work I go home and just gen play games, but even those don't seem to help these days like they used to. Therapists in my area , ones thate are experienced, charge 150 or so , so that takes away that option. I just feel stuck in life and know that I'm going to die alone. It' be awesome to have low self esteem but i have zero. My health his deteriorating and I'm losing my hair. This further adds to self loathing and sadness. Even when I'm forced to hang out with friends, I feel completely dead and empty as I see people socializing while I'm frozen in a corner on my phone. 

I've tried things from exercise , video games, music and meditation, some help someday and someday they don't. I intentionally sleep 10+ hrs on the weekends just to not have my brain be active.   


I don't want do die, really don't, but I just feel stuck like it's groundhog day. U just want the pain to stop or be manageable. This days no one really knows the extent of my battle.  I feel my control on things is getting worse by each day, and I hope my mother and father don't have to attend my funeral while they're alive.

Anyways, if you made it this far, thanks for taking the time out of your busy lives to read this and i hope you all live long, happy and prosperous life.",4.266718460969294,5.412425710691824,4.8726655567887525,85.11590177580466,70.71907756813417,8.211345418670613,25.55981008755704,8.583994105835817,1.5364618818596625,1892,55,392,31,34,606,241,477,0.2,0.6629999999999999,0.13699999999999998,-0.9818,3,2,0,0,0,1,58.0,1,3,2,9,25,29,2,2,14,1,34,11,3,5,5,84,76,41,5,8,22,2,6,2,3,1,8,0,2,3,22,28,0,3,12,8,0,8,13,12,1,4,14,8,47,17,50,54,11,68,0,6,1,0,24,31,0,11,31,244,69,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430667777684058,0.0,0.057374832737533216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977018840022053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740723818241512,0.055167843903573585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15058490537594732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009168096517168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522376853948885,0.0,0.08046865408117966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4164290808799452,0.0,0.06179427496602227,0.07282014981499378,0.1489209577729437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741322574223634,0.0,0.14216163447067798,0.06489789224612526,0.0,0.0,0.12896041868195907,0.0,0.0,0.08073360904210218,0.1813833466258024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866521332855751,0.16629113470689993,0.0,0.07496810201096267,0.0,0.12232382535853335,0.0,0.11476282546519108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637439530210423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626208801375108,0.0,0.0,0.14426844447412054,0.0,0.14393312815922918,0.1425188958456755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239263256870713,0.0,0.07937574129430877,0.0,0.11828831500503224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15202785837172988,0.07010243297354071,0.07190781704635907,0.2534102856149029,0.06349249022286824,0.0,0.08026483796217136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678873059005639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066907101474374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640659242020928,0.09723318519441243,0.0,0.07634224689372747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04973928076197535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352978644503375,0.0,0.09192398055228328,0.0,0.07084000396487032,0.07702779324464447,0.0,0.12254049219313125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057171856949857415,0.06531438848777335,0.1496923610666374,0.08105196846296267,0.0,0.05934860069739696,0.0,0.07179729160336808,0.07313547957480926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057296031310207336,0.05998243205524498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16183101158647384,0.0,0.0,0.13210719344089847,0.0,0.08330202959774581,0.09532901505109813,0.0,0.0,0.11391579077382664,0.2091768255604563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04871046998181748,0.0,0.07008490686043084,0.0,0.0863009760986723,0.06196505735159773,0.0,0.0,0.1692693668530167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450780089718315,0.06650877677942285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044631247583539,0.0,0.07311477134460066,0.05096592900569661,0.07844241726500148,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wutthefeckk,2020/03/13,"Just a meaningless cry for help from a room full of strangers I’m so depressed, my mind is so blocked. I want help but I don’t know who or how to ask. I feel like all of my social interactions are meaningless, my husband, my 1 year old daughter, my friends. I’m just too exhausted to want to get off the couch for very long and I’m so irritable I can’t doing anything that is usually fun. I feel like I’ll never be okay. I jus want to be normal but I always have a way of bringing my insecurities into everything and making myself miserable. Idk where else to share this but I want to die, I wish I would’ve died a long time ago. I’m so angry and miserable and tired all the time I don’t know what to do. Reddit is probably the worst place to look for this kind of help, idk where else or who else to tell this to without being embarrassed, ashamed, feeling like I’m begging for attention for placing a burden on someone. Idk what anyone could tell me besides to see a therapist. I want to go to a therapist but I don’t have time or transportation at a reasonable and reliable time everyday.",2.253035714285716,4.131902517857147,4.054785714285714,85.9402142857143,77.39285714285714,7.872857142857143,26.378571428571423,8.697196308434329,1.9653185714285717,860,34,181,19,20,290,118,224,0.257,0.564,0.179,-0.9802,0,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,0,0,10,17,0,5,11,1,16,2,0,3,3,38,39,17,2,8,10,2,3,3,1,0,2,0,2,0,8,6,0,1,7,0,0,3,6,9,0,0,0,5,21,8,28,35,4,26,0,3,2,0,14,10,0,3,15,111,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873092516402228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267640234644037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787891418819222,0.0,0.0916555771811034,0.0,0.10412450067232457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892721432154961,0.0,0.12234480215289903,0.0,0.0,0.0959307267916223,0.0,0.2311880141245808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791290456623669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010042757451733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16894998391948965,0.23870793097127516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860512802100624,0.0,0.058191025916676985,0.0,0.0632993562215264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239653550285852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159842792162288,0.1224221719097068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16324272795604028,0.0,0.0,0.19713414345386554,0.09353046184322236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434646927743889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246122381795648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590249195120075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912795093541502,0.0,0.0,0.1168737161724742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23273507999043005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200855969211262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451634991782696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887547882427971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353705037761234,0.09437122000124223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19470062970540514,0.0,0.0,0.2586396311607501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597843883112159,0.12801398589075152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266843413188525,0.09189949023938783,0.3284716382443238,0.08840761089555943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808056329144601,0.1073655574775894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912057571377021,0.0,0.0,0.07172454190221934
mentalhealth,__musical-me__,2020/03/13,"31 years of life wasted So I was recently put on Wellbutrin and though I haven’t been on it long yet I already notice a big difference in my moods.

I have spent my entire life without this med and I can only imagine how good life could have been growing up had I been RX this med instead of my docs ignoring my depression and anxiety problems. All the time spent just sitting or being somewhere feeling miserable. I was put on Paxil in my 20s and it’s okay but made it hard to keep a GF due to side effects if you know what I mean and if you don’t then it’s okay bc now I have a healthy sex drive. It also didn’t improve my mood/energy levels either but it did balance me.

I’m hoping this med continues to work out bc it would be nice if my 30s didn’t suck. My father was also put on this med funnily enough but his was for anger problems but he has seemed to mellow out on it. Is there some genetic component to certain meds working better?",1.8302425267907478,3.701927492385789,3.593054145516078,88.79542442188381,78.64467005076142,6.611280315848847,24.650028200789624,7.594959193182576,1.2235405527354777,744,27,156,11,18,249,122,197,0.12,0.7240000000000001,0.156,0.8338,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,4,10,15,2,1,4,2,23,5,0,3,2,36,34,19,0,8,11,1,2,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,13,7,0,2,6,0,2,5,5,7,0,0,14,2,21,7,19,16,4,28,0,2,0,1,6,13,1,7,9,108,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12966285290767487,0.18792750352091447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898862640761086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391814442093672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381323468106152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120154841560583,0.0,0.0,0.1227612426872508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140767478561115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941092615919191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855242278688822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105255849998122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670282518886585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443833646471026,0.0,0.0,0.06457427026783341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489786420827369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398274479067966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118021011944247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799064439993355,0.6525734197074158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377316806020806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936313576173266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22486097529801244,0.0,0.3543562566841486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601589459467708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696649895828636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154419791580114,0.0,0.06851449798875085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132646548882987,0.0,0.1710810586205756,0.0,0.0,0.08346777973610629,0.0,0.0,0.0756653779520672
mentalhealth,hashtagrichie6,2020/03/13,"I'm so messes in the head that I'm waiting for humanity to end. I know its selfish but, you know the feeling!",1.2512500000000024,2.5580616250000037,4.331666666666667,85.38000000000002,78.58333333333334,6.466666666666668,28.66666666666667,7.1686216300943375,1.5105666666666666,85,4,19,1,2,31,19,24,0.10099999999999999,0.823,0.076,-0.1511,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,6,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.487450893065889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782758628066624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5648226795992155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6049210788514785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PartyBlueberry,2020/03/13,"What on earth was my brother talking about? Context:

1. I’m pretty sure he’s a narcissist. He likes to put me down etc. I usually am able to brush it off but sometimes I confront him angrily and tell him no one cares about his bullshit comments and he should keep to himself.

2. Two months should got out of a bad relationship and he recently said he’s on #3 or whatever of his ‘victims’. 

After the breakup I thought he had a girlfriend as she came over a few times and then he said they broke up because they had a ‘disagreement ‘.

Is he seducing women and using them for sex? Is he emotionally abusing them by getting ‘close’ to them, fucking them, then ghosting them? If any of these are true, so there anything I can do?",2.7056933911159295,4.802868345070426,3.793943661971831,87.31709100758397,76.8169014084507,6.904442036836404,29.937161430119176,7.882392219407189,2.0416905742145177,563,27,113,9,13,182,102,142,0.17,0.746,0.084,-0.9502,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,7,0,4,9,3,0,6,0,11,3,0,1,2,18,22,12,1,3,3,1,0,1,1,2,0,2,0,1,3,8,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,5,0,2,8,3,19,4,20,12,2,17,0,1,0,3,31,8,1,2,8,76,22,0,0.18793224182461205,0.22266897565456498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278003689119073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546522221568874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15691557198856582,0.11456175029227947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21494441892687732,0.1916094455675376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113984770644769,0.0,0.0,0.20959412727903093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737403292670538,0.09818683973612592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503065817241571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16704281149863254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181420053130092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000572244623375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12734775078500388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19119465279614484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889238102672272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18556041648721816,0.20176889604150267,0.0,0.0,0.3575331960511021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18586979257952185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771239138329715,0.0,0.0,0.15105281723182626,0.16426106280357444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14919720777362305,0.10958480151898596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835824926398739,0.0,0.0,0.16231311697157505,0.20698081350267308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwafay1989,2020/03/13,"great childhood led to awful mindspace    Long story short, I grew up never going to any kind of school, mom called it homeschool but really it was just me and the TV, lots of video games, playing outside with my dogs, watching cartoons, doing nothing productive and in generally being neglected. The freedom I had couldn't have been matched, my mom didn't care what happened, where I went, what I did. I was completely free. My dad was a truck driver and never home, but he pretty much didn't care either when he was there. I could tell from a young age that my mom didn't like me, and only forced herself to say she loves me. My dad is still the opposite, completely loving, caring and was a great dad otherwise.   
   As I got older I focused on my own studies and thanks to the internet I was able to pull myself out of what would've been an uneducated life. I went on to do martial arts and win an international title at a tournament, had a few jobs by want and not be need, worked out and made physical fitness my sole focus. I don't remember doing anything note worthy when i was 16-20, vague trips to a lake, I stopped martial arts, focused on work, had a crappy relationship, focused to much on the ladies and not enough on my own growth.  
   Joined the military at 21, got married, had a kid, went to afghanistan (no combat, no killing), then got out last year, and my entire time in I was depressed because I had to waste so much time on bullshit work, got out, still the same, there's no point in anything I'm doing, no point in my life. I work so I can buy dumb shit I don't need, but now I kind of have to buy it because any visitors would think I'm abusive if there wasn't any furniture or something. I literally don't even want a bed, I just want to sleep on the floor in an empty room and my wife would let me, but then I feel shitty for sleeping separately from her.

I feel like the immense freedoms I had for the first 20 years of my life really fucked with my head and now that I have to live a normal 9 to 5 life until I'm dead, it's really gonna drive me to kill myself. I was alive in the first part of my life, now it's just going through the motions using my time on this planet to do shit for companies that don't give a fuck.

I'm sure sure most will say I need to find my passion, I need to see a therapist/get help, or that you care. Frankly as long as I have bills, my passion doesn't mean shit. I need health insurance for my family, I need to provide for my daughter and wife since I'm the bread winner, passions don't bring food on the table. Therapists? I've seen three, and I keep hearing it's a numbers game, but if I'm told I need cognitive behavioral therapy I feel like their trash, CBT never helped me. Caring? You don't know who I am, if I never wrote this you wouldn't be here and thus I would just end up a statistic on someones page at some point, unidentifiable from the rest.

I know that everyone works, or everyone has to at least, they have to make their living, this isn't just a me problem and I shouldn't even feel this way, entitled to something that I haven't earned, but it doesn't stop me from feeling like this...",7.673008433863566,5.298146068111457,7.765388064481693,79.06431888544896,64.3250773993808,11.015607985480942,34.50496423614818,9.314750747691287,2.7560566456709727,2464,79,533,34,29,803,290,646,0.16399999999999998,0.6709999999999999,0.165,-0.5548,1,0,2,0,0,3,78.0,0,3,3,9,21,35,8,0,33,1,58,21,6,5,6,94,115,39,3,22,20,9,5,4,0,7,6,3,3,1,22,23,2,4,11,7,4,13,27,11,0,3,33,11,78,25,71,69,16,79,0,2,3,7,37,34,6,9,35,342,100,8,0.05866222339048325,0.06950514219996659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11967697055665055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654802301000223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151989379153283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05990068891145293,0.0,0.2990502318942029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12301245025883235,0.0,0.0,0.04683701198873956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05052568704762525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0519573180535913,0.0606137581631283,0.0,0.0774916905856177,0.0,0.0,0.1121085367279236,0.0,0.0,0.0553015234083642,0.0,0.14830691374411875,0.1257249123342831,0.0,0.0,0.053616209423118524,0.0997961144966687,0.0709345933769491,0.0,0.0,0.10846456050805496,0.030648590527545514,0.056274150035865535,0.06667818684856032,0.0,0.1876701557658468,0.12935061676769788,0.0,0.0,0.05187481040923647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602043652504937,0.06235520029484815,0.06611658920160743,0.0,0.0786401035840848,0.0,0.058842993085991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05821320498549332,0.05214167951581288,0.12980211730017707,0.1221753569500807,0.06447844765146307,0.047817541605901785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059986097904002875,0.20717431614375026,0.114637596820929,0.0,0.10359963599110174,0.10382844341612467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987252454562861,0.1058898938720528,0.05550761416529795,0.03915748963277752,0.0,0.0,0.06390035869231536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061134611228736,0.0,0.0,0.1293704518618136,0.3044810673639682,0.1809756923603984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057476523753314274,0.056287985472082615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04461526430948852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352547133995573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16636428723084415,0.0,0.0,0.0596805706381164,0.0,0.056131825278372925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274156730806673,0.0,0.0,0.06298127419713312,0.06645286358440257,0.0,0.0,0.09330110913870644,0.0,0.0593693018978057,0.046746197018549436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18064778793458774,0.048525997387297695,0.0,0.11740917709329922,0.0,0.049704311512646274,0.090322091085848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936954547534461,0.09808849094985464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057690261326644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05127336888544231,0.05400829377968335,0.06708536491048016,0.13622272549364775,0.0,0.03758838407185816,0.0,0.0,0.10261924262428447,0.0,0.0,0.0560542683639618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05066532615450978,0.0,0.0,0.10380149772451952,0.04656334242562366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314140638393487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21353398645990196,0.0,0.0,0.16668784158074396,0.0,0.0,0.07555309709385626
mentalhealth,Level_3_Gay,2020/03/13,Maternal deprivation hypothesis? I think this kinda relates to me. My mom while i love her has always been negligent. I never could really confide with my parents as they always belittled me or insulted me whenever i talk to them. Along with for the majority of my childhood my mom never really giving me emotional support. I really dont know anything about this but I think it somewhat relates to me. Anyone knows how to heal from it because I kinda feel lonely,3.9608104575163376,6.86859485882353,6.140392156862745,67.86065359477126,76.88235294117645,9.42483660130719,30.62091503267974,9.725611199111238,4.066581699346407,373,18,55,12,9,130,58,85,0.12300000000000001,0.8079999999999999,0.069,-0.5613,1,2,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,0,2,5,1,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,2,17,12,5,0,1,2,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,19,2,12,10,2,4,0,2,0,1,10,0,0,4,4,47,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31937697925265696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419129212592412,0.0,0.15792953022892084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698948229472228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322835351981595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22492271918375464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158783217484812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703789052162476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18410216599205426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109427128597067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732106020800767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4495365943173528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29603305366874705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21309867655329576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688366101580484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21778264354556845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542538486189799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245942512480771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NamelessAnonymous420,2020/03/13,"I've been crying for 2 hours Is it normal to cry for this amount of time? I'm not asking if it's normal to feel this sad for hours. I just wanna know if I really should be worried that I'm crying for so long. I've had episodes similar to this one before, but never to this extant. I'm already taking therapy due to my suspicions of having childhood trauma and the fact that I have to endure so much stress from my disfunctional parents, but I fear that things are getting worse.",4.999931972789113,5.187152122448982,6.0718367346938775,80.62197278911567,68.59183673469389,8.574149659863947,26.537414965986393,8.344100000000001,1.6640965986394556,380,10,75,5,6,127,65,98,0.278,0.722,0.0,-0.9812,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,1,0,8,0,0,0,2,15,16,7,0,6,6,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,2,1,6,0,14,12,2,7,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,7,51,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19052127208346212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16140249876703286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691066318370494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.568936897208613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19427690816411866,0.08729597547545473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020141204158684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3400468464236239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09488278130089403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278797564601215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691608579200206,0.0,0.13315671875220714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383166085325328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169906982646377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19170508285217505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060267799079156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977676082141435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298097489968355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19743794210738344,0.0,0.11469960603891664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006723901275812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753323425541371,0.17594297946655568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asrmar,2020/03/13,"No one will ever fully understand. Been to group therapies, family doctors, psychiatrists, online/community based support, etc etc. The biggest problem is there's just not enough time for me to be able to fully explain my life. I don't even blame them. I wish this was the matrix where you could just plug into the back of their head and show them everything.

Even lists and journals, or prioritizing issues just isn't enough. There's too many interconnected problems.

I swear at least 50% of those struggling could be ""cured"" just by having someone fully understand them and their life.",6.446153846153845,8.608729000000004,6.0453846153846165,74.8746153846154,66.69230769230771,8.661538461538461,29.34615384615385,9.188382445141503,2.6721576923076933,472,17,77,9,8,146,76,104,0.10800000000000001,0.8220000000000001,0.069,-0.4878,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,5,0,12,4,0,1,3,0,11,4,1,0,1,19,16,4,0,5,6,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,11,1,9,9,5,7,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,3,60,13,1,0.16140434046107044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241099749192056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577364645348974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16520418174941254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33354765959224425,0.3600170098492941,0.2132120892678959,0.14599946651991905,0.0,0.0,0.14505981379445776,0.0,0.15215764756825628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564741846640862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16846419727721354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280093179221712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16363866781455755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093717582735846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088843113778606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675737389578296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687348612893754,0.0,0.0,0.18315973282725265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457992984498586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411616890217316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33605522129953125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856070259831356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tif172y,2020/03/13,"I Need Help. For the past year or two I haven't been feeling as well as I used to. There are times (especially lately) where I feel empty and have no real reason to be alive since I don't feel important in anyone else's life besides my family. I've always felt like an acquaintance to everyone I talk to and feel like I would never be mentioned in a conversation with anyone (besides obvious context). I've never been sociable at all, I had a best friend who I can't talk to anymore, I've never been in a relationship, etc. I try to be nice to everyone I meet and not become a burden or annoyance to them. I often get afraid of what people think of me, and anytime someone is nice to me, I think that it's either out of common courtesy or so I can just leave them alone. Sometimes it gets to the point where I feel completely lost, it feels so heavy and it all wells up inside of me and I try to hold it back because so I don't look even more pathetic than I already am. I don't have anything going for me and I don't feel like I have the right to feel like this because there are people who have it worse yet are doing better for a fact (or at least it feels like it). Another reason is that I have a better life than I had in the past where my family was poor (not borderline poverty though), so that further makes this feeling worse. It just takes the motivation out if everything I do, and it makes everything feel much more difficult than it actually is. I just hate feeling like this because sometimes it affects work which in turn affects the people that work with me. I try to hide this because it would cause problems for others and burden them. I feel hopeless at this point, and waste my life at home playing videogames living an unaccomplished life when I'm not working. I feel like I have no value or importance at all. 

P.S. I'm sorry if this is in the wrong subreddit or if it is too long, I'm new here and just looked up a subreddit that might pertain to this post.",5.57502595717067,5.309097166666668,6.343437162016006,80.71396820246594,67.38308457711443,9.478866536880815,30.4135842526498,9.085049710711278,2.3254497945057326,1559,52,320,25,23,515,177,402,0.142,0.7120000000000001,0.146,0.5805,0,1,0,0,0,1,36.0,0,0,3,8,23,26,2,1,16,0,36,4,0,9,8,74,69,28,0,7,17,0,15,7,1,3,4,0,1,0,31,15,0,1,20,1,1,1,14,10,2,1,8,17,40,16,44,55,10,38,0,2,2,0,13,22,0,11,21,229,71,4,0.0,0.0,0.06820610574460093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723887273213375,0.07712936453485868,0.0,0.05815710360632333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328957071803695,0.0,0.0,0.06931570520695886,0.09774250977632222,0.0716142889809377,0.057516506502839376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05374389124535155,0.0,0.17042604532324482,0.07719202889074922,0.0,0.0,0.07334905812036119,0.12363048109909502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07180001650934835,0.0,0.0,0.07328214679765481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05838716371199298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794987887320477,0.046164086912706175,0.0,0.0,0.1335727274512377,0.1256317852246035,0.0,0.13177899791504102,0.0,0.4947645088519035,0.29959216201017635,0.06710885064406752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053999649230293836,0.0,0.07303307934944707,0.0,0.03972216362292008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900549470429096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046848230426317375,0.0,0.07010901495365289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884306493607779,0.07400726790579505,0.0,0.0,0.1974717663638762,0.23902549810038226,0.0,0.06171736045342624,0.06185366778877027,0.11738610092847393,0.0,0.0762971593264849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330908855027263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414610182098402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0513798639875785,0.05182524493304485,0.16171884097654204,0.06750370847776263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344276698818178,0.14536633879870278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132144153897545,0.0,0.06693878220257274,0.0,0.0,0.06687876961095958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955425860040206,0.0,0.14372459565042325,0.0,0.0750396073162728,0.0,0.05968878262752705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057816737355546426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922065035013933,0.0,0.1382531849136495,0.0782402024076229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05255131535217435,0.1123557130110028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895700385983576,0.06867014178257977,0.0,0.04075554079517259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235957122713552,0.07602420471023552,0.06827592571555252,0.0,0.0,0.060365659914806226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256855439902529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265019671537922,0.0,0.14245517103917216,0.09930086629769616,0.07641771808014486,0.0,0.04500920956049247
mentalhealth,pancakesnshit,2020/03/13,"I Need Help I am an angry person. I want so bad to be a loving, caring person, but I am terrible. I only care about myself. I make decisions that go against my instinctual morals all the time, and it eats at me.

It usually starts out with one bad fucking decision. One decision. Should me just a minor obstacle in life right? Wrong. After that one bad decision I spiral down, down, down until the pain is too strong to hold in anymore and I break down crying. I then feel more much more open with family and friends a couple of days. I feel genuine happiness, but it's just a tease. I then inevitably repeat this ridiculous cycle.",2.256733921815893,4.758639049180328,3.8355737704918016,84.2784678436318,80.63934426229507,7.032534678436318,22.499369482976046,8.139509932561175,1.5152552332912983,492,16,92,10,13,163,83,122,0.28300000000000003,0.555,0.162,-0.9717,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,5,15,3,0,7,0,5,5,0,1,1,23,16,9,0,3,4,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,6,7,1,1,6,0,0,1,0,9,0,3,0,2,15,6,17,14,4,21,1,0,0,2,6,10,1,0,9,68,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638229953359996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4137774798074422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33684217353101725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827783693438127,0.1814522434613514,0.10653317093793907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902947808468688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572538789269308,0.0,0.16704893642389598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762452978855246,0.1527144707479493,0.0,0.0,0.09388065527868487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758466494109196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072263366167012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166778010965584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908942630183944,0.0,0.11026486950350643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143284401810188,0.12248547185091445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3358088092289835,0.12563359763574433,0.17577262997188398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28847314133588314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107041295771408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692154944425436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632297254523788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18193222910528176,0.0,0.09743268961826622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180608123876874,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lost_girl_2019,2020/03/13,"Barefoot and Manic. I am wired, wide awake and feel compelled to walk around my yard barefoot right now. It's 10 pm. I feel wide awake, full of energy and aimless. I feel like wandering around my yard right now, barefoot. It's nighttime. I should be going to bed. Instead, I'm fighting the urge to go outside. To jump on my rebounder. To burn all this crazy energy and slow my manic mind. Ugh. Bipolar Disorder sucks.",1.0377083333333308,3.6479986875,2.202500000000001,91.14583333333334,93.375,5.166666666666668,22.91666666666667,6.816661863887847,1.0224166666666663,325,13,62,5,12,103,52,80,0.156,0.752,0.09300000000000001,-0.7469,0,0,0,0,2,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,2,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,1,13,10,4,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,3,0,3,6,0,0,3,2,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,3,8,1,9,8,2,15,0,0,0,0,1,8,1,0,4,33,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49838118054932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32081571734064873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42461205209471203,0.1999768650847117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181730938110608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675611384882586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826421756227027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4781049898162642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sparklinghottea,2020/03/13,"I recognize that I have problems but I feel pathetic for having them. Throwaway accounts for reasons. 

Hi. Just for some context, I live in Japan. I’m mixed, had issues adjusting to this country as a child while also being raised under narcissistic parents who woke me up at three with their arguing. I was the peacekeeper, at 15 sitting my parents down to sort through debt and bills, trying to just keep everyone happy. We had the police come to our house a few times as a child. I have my own family now and though I don’t fight often with my husband now, when things get bad, they get really bad. Over the past three years, the police came to our house around four times from one of us destroying the house. 

I’m depressed. I feel like I have suffered from depression and suicidal thoughts from a child. I self harm when it gets too bad and drinking when I’m close to the brink usually pushes me over the edge. Which again, isn’t often. This bomb happens once - twice a year for me. I have an autistic child and I have no friends, no family to help. I feel alone most of the time and often feel pathetic for feeling that way. I’m tired of the cops ‘knowing’ who I am, like they knew my parents. I’m tired of knowing I can’t do anything right. I’m tired that the only help I can afford is just medication, which has me doing better but doesn’t take away the stress the piles up over time. 

I’m a nice person. So I tell myself. But am I really? Am I perhaps narcissistic like my parents, playing the victim but really, maybe I am just a good for nothing mom, wife, who thinks she has anxiety but is maybe just lazy and selfish like her father and hides behind that ‘anxiety’. I’m so confused. I’m so tired of feeling confused. I love my husband and my kid but I wonder if that’s enough. It wasn’t enough to stop me from getting into a physical fight with my husband, my sister, and doing this all in front of my kid. Do I need help or is this just me thinking I do but in reality, just need to realize that I’m a pathetic piece of shit and that’s just who I am? 

I’m sorry for the ramble. I don’t have anyone to talk to. Just needed to say this.",2.562930102516312,4.296348558620693,3.9418018018018017,87.7418918918919,76.0574712643678,7.001553277415347,24.400434917676296,7.824948511530503,1.2266837527182353,1673,55,348,25,37,551,201,435,0.263,0.624,0.113,-0.9979,6,1,1,0,2,0,50.0,4,0,4,1,26,29,6,3,24,0,33,8,1,1,1,69,71,31,1,5,18,11,6,4,1,0,5,1,0,8,21,20,1,2,16,2,3,4,8,18,0,5,8,7,53,11,52,62,8,40,0,3,0,1,45,18,1,11,20,243,74,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218708997330919,0.0,0.0634595796970605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214115961089011,0.0,0.0,0.055486349480520336,0.0,0.06530180139671977,0.07064212287716952,0.0,0.0,0.07455594725938759,0.0,0.1987724982248566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018240166338571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907601427275785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835667564137166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13669543003174808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773697245767361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16398834379311295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582640402202019,0.0,0.0,0.14961628362602206,0.0,0.24074341431705315,0.056690705135915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061308910849011675,0.0,0.16583731985992678,0.0,0.0,0.06655859532010347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017271739444132,0.08447409420190084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595684799946664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746925139628623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282523922877758,0.0,0.07053371978171477,0.0,0.0,0.08722206113880605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15507394862807286,0.0,0.07007127275472559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162032534665329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944405691063515,0.0,0.0,0.07994107682920358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293875996502464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765205533712474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07614256063924972,0.0,0.0,0.08450970590628261,0.053772505911005006,0.06035249688952304,0.0,0.0,0.3524540960519828,0.0,0.07575262822387184,0.0,0.06928908625088773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759313177439986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525091287833739,0.08158940425671078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776811155180869,0.0,0.06310569920668688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08278380836947649,0.0,0.08145601606804584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883060654265437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06634372155551822,0.09090004623824686,0.0,0.0,0.0868006898114785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596645340080707,0.06378195498077707,0.06935912818330899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052719449795624235,0.10169402189539667,0.07796516571028594,0.06299842507981948,0.18508844800515736,0.3648242317484996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387633923105569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545341414276808,0.0,0.08739751545614056,0.0,0.0,0.06298772454678897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605631895500976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220309411864306
mentalhealth,hokye,2020/03/13,"What helps you get over the ""little things"" and focus more on the important stuff? I have a co-worker that drives me nuts, as I'm sure you all do",3.3367741935483863,3.533671870967744,4.158225806451615,92.85733870967744,72.2258064516129,7.490322580645162,18.725806451612907,7.1686216300943375,-0.08888387096774243,112,1,27,1,2,36,28,31,0.071,0.713,0.21600000000000005,0.5667,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,3,4,2,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,19,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360975315628965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3028970340637037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4529195124144706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5173139505184701,0.0,0.0,0.42590757528310025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30022028751101715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3289863986577609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,troubleWithALilTea,2020/03/13,"Thoughts? Weirdest mental health trick I've thought of, but I feel it's counterintuitive and likely only works for a few?. 

That person who's going through a bad spell for a minute, invite them to help with something.

Some people use ""busybody"" methods to drive the current stress factor to the back of the line of things running through their mind till they get to a better time to deal with it.

Some of those same people have an easier time doing things for others than themselves.

Not sure how many people will have this combination of tendencies, but I'm sure it exists.",6.581051212938008,7.761653547169812,5.6779784366576855,81.32537735849056,65.41509433962264,7.5665768194070075,28.350404312668466,7.447530270364453,1.6013196765498656,460,14,81,4,7,138,76,106,0.14,0.748,0.11199999999999999,-0.3063,1,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,3,2,2,7,1,1,8,0,4,1,0,2,2,17,11,5,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,10,3,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,2,1,4,4,19,8,4,8,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,2,6,55,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14822151879525966,0.16094760946697195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048167943627882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987284060667054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09746589034015864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070980806033512,0.0,0.10955067237585384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048962169276247,0.0,0.0,0.1292038165781242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417342016068912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19542967350445695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19425802302275771,0.0,0.19463393343767932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14660363259222106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40090918277737503,0.1683117065060361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483970437186746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22080738441894085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633504329694952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561240461169201,0.0,0.0,0.3060618347306097,0.2248012942868232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16648384752796622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033250091163094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itstime4nut,2020/03/13,"Does suicide-awareness indirectly cause more harm than good? Could suicide awareness be counter-productive? The constant reinforcement of suicide in the media (even if to raise positive awareness) could in theory increase suicidal thoughts. It's the same counter-intuitive principle used with anti-smoking advertisements - how seeing someone smoking on those ads can subconsciously make people crave cigarettes. I think a certain level of awareness is appropriate, but maybe over pushing can be reinforcing suicidal thoughts in certain individuals... myself included.",12.327991967871485,15.568423024096393,10.277289156626503,46.01826305220885,53.6987951807229,13.24417670682731,54.79718875502007,12.45797560212912,8.668776706827309,473,34,46,16,6,144,65,83,0.185,0.706,0.109,-0.8757,0,0,1,0,0,3,16.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,4,2,16,13,3,4,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,2,3,10,7,3,9,0,0,1,0,0,6,0,2,1,31,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17940238800693895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887227473186205,0.0,0.2788701062614871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15282779003307626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153474307519283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647893076249882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657290710016972,0.0,0.17544837642968258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210727127196762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916469450503596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14797108146563834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7641070050763161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190163735078572,0.0,0.2772877612886197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083204808067086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mcturtleburger,2020/03/13,"I feel so lost without school... My school was canceled and with it the pinnacle of my social life and activities, we begin online learning on Wednesday and I dread it, travel is a no go, many stores and restaurants are closed. I will not see my friends for a long time. The activities in school that most of all I was looking for we're postponed till tomorrow for Tuesday and now canceled. I got him at 4 and just slept till 9. I have crazy amounts of work and my friends can't understand why I am upset. They offer suggestions but all I really want is sympathy which I don't get. I feel horrible and I haven't yet wrapped my mind around maybe not coming back to school till may or late April. I have nothing to do day to day and nothing fills the space as school did. Now I am just alone, I can't even grasp how sucky this situation will be after the weekend and when I sink into a boredom that will last. I just need to be listened to. That's all I want.",2.803288461538461,4.4164863641025685,3.746714743589745,89.90776442307694,75.1025641025641,6.926282051282049,26.03365384615385,7.645422480735847,1.234288461538461,751,27,162,10,16,241,117,195,0.124,0.8170000000000001,0.06,-0.7876,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,1,2,12,5,0,2,7,0,21,2,1,1,3,39,37,19,0,3,8,0,2,0,2,4,1,1,0,0,7,16,0,0,5,2,1,4,8,3,0,0,6,5,25,2,23,25,5,32,0,1,2,0,9,7,0,3,21,113,32,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791862417793005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854494908374975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239554987095788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470972704954875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717606235879395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795412751446594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346642986276322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20576566555377696,0.0,0.06957313794619165,0.0,0.07568065303765772,0.0,0.1065040953820184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854712602216332,0.1502157510476057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405827170435548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11784670179263385,0.11182493557180301,0.0,0.14536516433396934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13500825684583811,0.13378199039291866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13445853746396755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874004894603143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555505300932387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530881278802857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6738496876378095,0.10611514453522412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14968287078352582,0.0,0.13574479472549594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07764949491577619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13862930515606373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570881574193694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016056465356845,0.0,0.0,0.12836616339698065,0.0,0.09694559678248756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pony13,2020/03/13,"I had an angry outburst after a cooking screwup I tried cooking Mac n cheese for dinner. End product was sub-par, and I got mad enough to swear and such until my throat got sore. I'm 99% sure this isn't a healthy response; does anyone have suggestions for how to fix it?

I've been gettin 7.5-8 hours of sleep, so I don't think that's part of the problem.",3.4656000000000016,3.9429603600000007,4.262666666666668,91.21800000000002,72.06666666666666,6.533333333333332,27.0,5.6839178017228535,0.7441999999999998,277,9,62,1,5,89,62,75,0.244,0.7240000000000001,0.031,-0.9268,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,4,0,6,6,2,1,1,6,10,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,0,5,1,8,5,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,33,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063256246879919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582250293726016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26135181071420066,0.3048947875597916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4720021824050822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29059270962315176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31954106915306657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823501043695981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952914255134176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781078277687148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18907427494367998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003388121911365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iwtmrhl,2020/03/13,Why do people with autism die so young. I found a study that said people with autism die in their early 50s. Why is this?,0.4462666666666699,2.7569621600000005,0.8760000000000012,103.62466666666668,87.4,3.333333333333334,8.333333333333334,3.1291,-2.359266666666666,94,0,22,0,3,28,20,25,0.271,0.7290000000000001,0.0,-0.8316,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,3,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6095754031198878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3219988633123035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40719375667194346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27935164142694074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5299910045427892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theatregirl2001,2020/03/13,"Is This Normal? Hi, this is my first time posting on this subreddit. I'm a little nervous to post this.   


So, I have a question. Is it normal to remember trauma from your past, but not remember anything else before or after that? I'm asking because I have a *severe* memory gap. I remember my trauma in vivid detail, but I can't remember anything that occurred before the trauma or after it.   


It didn't become an issue until a friend of mine brought up the fact that we knew each other during the time period that the trauma occurred and I couldn't (and still can't) remember any of it. It's really weird.   


Thanks in advance",2.9940611028315978,5.0990899262295075,4.9846348733233965,79.07936661698959,75.96721311475409,7.387183308494784,24.205663189269746,8.296473431620573,1.8295639344262296,489,16,85,9,11,168,72,122,0.139,0.7909999999999999,0.069,-0.7708,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,1,0,2,2,8,0,1,9,0,9,0,0,0,1,20,15,8,0,3,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,14,4,0,0,7,0,0,2,5,6,0,1,3,1,10,2,12,11,1,18,0,0,1,0,6,5,0,3,9,65,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858294753906898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21438982999442024,0.0,0.12177782675071043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07940679359947757,0.14386466561555794,0.2216875379958045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881758005810564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080119174904277,0.0,0.0,0.10064046238334648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596017703729665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055721766427486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552591295394361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435026859276045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495108797286677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14592378009417978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344947483104469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7378099355295197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14715951510410585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040277780403654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992818248091387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15191418939841847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheGravyBoater,2020/03/13,"How do I overcome my fear of trying with others? I've had an issue with myself in the past year. I don't fully understand how to convey what I'm feeling but I'll give it a try. I want desperately to love someone else and I want to be loved back. I think I fear someone not caring for me as much as I care for them, however when put in the moment I always decide to not pursue the person anymore at the hints of being bored or not caring. I haven't been able to find someone that I can seem to push myself to want to continue. All of my attempts seem to boil down to half assed friendships. I've looked online and I know that each person is different and meanings to things change on the perspective of the person experiencing it, but all of the answers I find are cryptic or vague simply stating that you must love yourself. I know I can't get a director answer but I'm curious how others overcame their fear of the outcome of trying with others. I wouldn't say I've been depressed, a lack of ambition to help myself seems to be missing and  I'm curious to see what others have done in similar situations. Any stories or advice is appreciated.",4.804155844155844,5.41553954545455,6.200415584415584,78.03776623376625,69.12987012987013,8.584242424242424,29.252813852813848,8.648137234880735,2.2203561904761906,909,32,173,14,15,309,126,231,0.138,0.691,0.171,0.8663,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,2,1,6,12,0,3,12,0,18,5,1,3,3,42,44,16,0,6,9,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,12,8,1,0,14,0,0,2,7,6,0,1,4,5,24,6,35,35,5,15,0,2,2,4,12,6,1,6,6,125,36,1,0.11023080031732327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771626230674797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172085626931537,0.0,0.0,0.07496072419098747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931933401515624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476068130278472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371629422637288,0.0,0.11660957065320528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494162679053658,0.0,0.0,0.1151677249017088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280438004104945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920836891577664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721208890310451,0.055736004705401514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014979089814168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05759104355729815,0.10574342800373497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388538188715472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505231667026712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115993013985313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256610993007956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29846280295249783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007365681200312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103232155167484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522777177792583,0.0,0.2887478491107369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108124002702514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765995675269625,0.0,0.0,0.08783967622307892,0.30104994188869244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239040380461571,0.0,0.0,0.2801945981892015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323244567775371,0.07063144591870403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22451843302708346,0.0,0.0,0.11475415062830102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950509460261414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098502134560501
mentalhealth,mindthismama,2020/03/13,COVID19 & empathy For those of you who don’t believe in #MentalHealthMatters I hope the panic & anxiety secondary to #COVID19 gives you some empathy and a window into what someone with #anxiety or #ocd experiences on the daily. #bekindalways and #FactsNotFear. Fact checking can decrease anxiety ✅ @mindthismama,7.967800000000004,11.69809618,7.661999999999999,57.941,67.2,12.0,44.0,11.20814326018867,7.0494,259,17,31,10,5,82,42,50,0.13,0.8140000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,4,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,7,4,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,3,0,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5385559587440817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5703654728345989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28000386516786585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24310626284052864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384089287449977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24684254320037335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915918887282667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105754001470526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pleasehlpppllll,2020/03/13,We can't even afford to get the virus The paranoia is already driving me crazy . 30 classes just announced around us. If one of us gets sick we might not even be able to pay rent . And it's crazy this is an issue in our modern day. How hasn't this world figure out to put people's lives and at least not suffering life above greed. I'm staying clean . Tomorrow ima super clean the apartment.  Making my SO wash his hands when he gets home and use hand sanitizer. But I feel like this is gonna hit like a wave and gonna be hard to dodge. I'm sorry for every one else whose in my position and similar. At least I have a roof.  Stay healthy everyone ! Be safe . I hope o don't freak you out from me being freaked out .,0.8837306843267143,2.8324956953642406,2.4803708609271555,95.2093863134658,82.11258278145695,5.616070640176601,20.00044150110375,6.742157984588678,0.09351090507726267,554,15,128,6,15,181,107,151,0.11599999999999999,0.6940000000000001,0.19,0.9343,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,5,1,0,1,7,9,1,0,6,0,12,5,2,3,0,24,24,10,0,2,5,0,4,2,0,3,3,0,4,0,5,11,0,1,2,0,3,2,5,4,0,2,0,4,14,5,15,16,2,18,0,1,0,0,9,10,0,3,6,71,19,2,0.1713415304792813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890796395609492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15253028864053156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050111242798387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313386265046055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22633892984221016,0.0,0.1443626293284081,0.16372417505293016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663542604727971,0.12240642361005515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685566334436471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534883564030253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17186952540518782,0.17018080065049304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788360418932064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102359014857045,0.1674176339943442,0.0,0.1512977105355636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437180208370926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817662869609793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322109108128467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878664332368212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722455629799482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918028154338424,0.0,0.3652545475497301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4122055288807308,0.1479840691983385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Eluminon,2020/03/13,"My friend's unhealthy coping methods are triggering I've been really conflicted on what to do about this situation and was wondering if I could get some advice? TW for mentions of abuse.

So my friend has this habit of oversharing and idk what to do. She'll go into explicit detail about stuff that happened to her as a child like being threatened with a knife by her mother and hit by a rolling pin. Now, you may be wondering why I'm writing this here. She laughs about it. She announces it to people out of nowhere, even people she barely knows and it makes people uncomfortable. I know it's just her (very unhealthy) way of coping, but she triggers me all the time without realising it. Every time she mentions it and laughs about it, and other stuff that happened to her as a kid, it gives me flashbacks of stuff that happened to me during my childhood that I have never ever spoken about and won't be doing so here for obvious reasons. I can't help but feel like she may be triggering others too with her comments. I genuinely want to help her, and I want to talk to her about going back to therapy but I think she's lost faith in the system. And sometimes, and I feel bad for saying this but I really think it's true, it's like she's trying to compete with who had a shittier childhood and I know it's probably an insecurity on her part, but it isn't a competition and I feel angry and anxious whenever she does it. I don't know how to confront her about it because I don't want to tell her that she's been triggering me all this time, bc she'll feel really bad and probably try to get me to tell her about it and I really don't want her to know. Does anyone have any ideas on how to approach this?",5.271871539313398,5.502177604651163,6.131710963455152,80.27751937984497,68.01162790697674,9.343078626799556,29.753045404208198,9.23628265651192,2.3721801218161684,1352,46,271,24,21,447,154,344,0.128,0.787,0.086,-0.9497,0,0,1,0,1,0,26.0,0,1,0,2,20,14,1,1,9,0,26,0,0,8,7,67,55,27,0,6,8,1,4,3,2,5,0,1,0,2,34,20,0,1,15,0,0,3,8,5,0,0,5,5,47,9,47,39,4,20,1,1,0,0,42,6,0,6,12,199,81,0,0.0,0.11637513204636235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597985392607697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679325112075675,0.0,0.0,0.1109611129480897,0.0,0.06867799872816194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552543725430026,0.16401988967361966,0.059874254051489766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842101004793342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190669618133236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648736585449461,0.08884598965546256,0.08275493683946206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19865277444601606,0.07016868494096618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15176969978144364,0.0,0.10263222710677984,0.09422197313659772,0.11164185200554788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605679689376051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167014912951114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087889443171106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698968602206199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14395660211511305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072191868855828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06556289049101086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575364005094191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636313920811326,0.0,0.2042810084165309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21179644217150875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516900547174464,0.1009869464153713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810881722139866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040386305509822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714250308686134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33731663247592897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789458499984276,0.1716979459545099,0.0,0.1123236058905478,0.0,0.0,0.12587135343704048,0.0,0.0,0.17181934361835666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337043045109567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104212981870687,0.231731785053585,0.07796279457586007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862864838971228,0.0,0.0,0.09468097618921673,0.21303170307923575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ambiguous23333455345,2020/03/13,"Cannot bear the shallowneas of it all It has been a rough couple of months. My life, relationships, school, work, friends, acquaintances, all seen so shallow and empty all of the sudden. On my run by the river this morning I could not hear the birds like I normally do. I could not enjoy the sun, the weather, the trees. It has been months without joy. I am starting to run on fumes.

I have a great system around me and I feel bad for even feeling the way I do but I just want no part in anything anymore. Things are just so shallow, so void of depth. I feel so small and nothing seems to matter. I have people depending on me and have a chance to do some real good in the world, a chance most dont get, so I dont want to squader it. But if not for that privilege I would probably hurl myself off a bridge.

Nothing has worked for me, not counseling, exercise, sleep, pills, ect. It is like I am just broken, I know what kind of persom I am expected to be and I act like that. The superficiality of life, dressing nice, warning lots of money, and taking care of yourself has not brought me love or joy. People are so shallow, liking the aesthetically or materially pleasing. I am the same. No depth, no great intellect. Boring. Loved for what I do rather than what I am.

I really dont know how long I can keep this up. I say this here because if I say it anywhere else they will send me away. I am not looking for help I just want someone to underatand. Its not wrong for a person to not want to be a person anymore even if there life looks great from the outside in.",2.9773333333333336,4.4557596857142885,4.158285714285714,87.69171428571433,74.36507936507937,6.944761904761903,25.29841269841269,7.554174236665415,1.1322279365079364,1211,40,257,15,25,396,159,315,0.121,0.6829999999999999,0.196,0.9829,0,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,1,2,17,22,1,0,20,0,33,8,1,2,3,55,55,20,0,13,21,0,4,4,1,2,5,3,0,2,16,7,0,1,6,1,1,5,16,4,0,0,4,10,34,18,36,45,8,26,0,0,3,2,12,14,0,10,9,187,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987428564227886,0.0,0.0,0.08245602320357404,0.08919920122451955,0.0,0.0,0.0941411536235708,0.0,0.08366277486634263,0.06108096093672302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216052940844997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600030172313104,0.11086934145351417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3523007937491546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370420282026865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13236224705191352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199231975575878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07741423463711515,0.0,0.05235033950792182,0.0,0.0,0.08404296608557918,0.0,0.33141240364359265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293262862118113,0.0,0.0671619159430017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906232156786427,0.0,0.10434283119952786,0.1101345467245596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21232256885090944,0.19581054171330292,0.0,0.0,0.08867380473056415,0.1682854479601869,0.0,0.0,0.08518641631282584,0.18086873814564666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599572920219393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981746788491583,0.1922891133954199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850678399251558,0.0,0.13893206123257526,0.1749814670179874,0.0,0.1099894582110319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803249590124088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404948234771616,0.06419065524865403,0.0,0.0,0.1075772500499873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936604769759738,0.0,0.1014077012091342,0.0,0.09121827338211756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027231556791864,0.0,0.08489909447404934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092204200719768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533789413728234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656839601129301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364021119742525,0.07953405826001075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965891784320352,0.0,0.14589351738846285,0.0,0.0,0.07117917127993184,0.10955291825433697,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justguylol,2020/03/13,"Mental health, self problems and psychodelics How can a person with obsessive disorders, with ruminations, catastrophic thinking react to a psychedelic trip?",12.330000000000005,16.78854927272728,10.690909090909091,38.00636363636365,56.27272727272727,13.490909090909092,47.36363636363637,12.161744961471696,8.44329090909091,132,8,11,5,2,41,20,22,0.315,0.685,0.0,-0.7783,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,7,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44490684930224056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4126347530781723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3912107922996136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3389582321025294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3714516472410752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4049736379843343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24874065846566085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kizuni_,2020/03/13,"Does everyone suck or is it just that hard to find good friends? I have such a hard time relating to people. I have never in my life had a ""best friend"". The people who I would have considered my friends have all stabbed me in the back at some point and we no longer speak. I get so jealous and lonely seeing people hanging out in their friend groups where they all have similar interests and care about each other. I've been alone for so long that I wonder if I'm just not meant to have any friends, if I'm just meant to live my life alone. If I do try to spend time with acquaintances I never feel like I am connecting with them. It's all very surface level and draining. Does anyone else feel like this?",4.0330069930069925,4.9916740139860165,4.1800069930069945,90.56385664335664,71.09790209790211,7.678041958041959,24.789510489510487,7.908726449838941,1.0567292307692302,556,15,121,7,10,172,90,143,0.162,0.684,0.154,0.5439,0,4,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,3,1,9,14,2,0,4,0,12,2,0,0,5,30,23,10,0,4,8,0,4,2,5,1,2,1,0,0,7,9,0,0,6,0,1,1,4,3,0,0,4,6,16,11,14,18,6,16,0,1,1,0,12,9,1,6,8,79,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.282836266498822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285442420189884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547455648944264,0.13990519569036333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499370626780828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432942290715821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392154411704605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23898069075137315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406477228456452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304733932213948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808123334156933,0.1950937475829233,0.0,0.0,0.12479850293792635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5274667667779388,0.0,0.07133846752967116,0.0,0.0,0.11452640925635425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244632738853664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19288976061616456,0.13341674670388695,0.0,0.12057062235202308,0.12083691145014452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106218969761213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839867066450608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907796735435415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108807680899591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592395035000052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270423521312476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266288396123672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14807585941886553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699675392504242,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,caelichyth,2020/03/13,I have a voice that explains or narrates my life I notice that there is a voice that explains or narrates my life. And it's weird and off-putting. I'd like to get rid of it. How?,-0.8638461538461542,1.2115815897435878,0.7648205128205134,103.47184615384614,92.07692307692308,3.12,20.620512820512825,3.1291,-0.7587887179487183,138,5,34,0,5,44,26,39,0.05,0.877,0.073,0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,1,0,7,5,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,21,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381210115817536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6438476534778335,0.22266619810597008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5188971610177682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4581747302755833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,J-bobble,2020/03/13,"Belonging Hi I'm J-bob.  I have a lot of issues.  I struggle with depression, substance use, anger and anxiety.  But most of all I struggle with Isolation.  I don't have a single friend but I know its my own fault.  I want to make a friend but I have so much hate and distrust in my heart.  I don't know what to do.  I'm so sad and alone.",-2.0646347031963472,-0.2863527260273955,0.845513698630139,99.83575913242012,103.65753424657534,4.625114155251142,17.042237442922374,6.42735559955562,-0.19827762557077647,253,8,63,4,12,87,44,73,0.45799999999999996,0.524,0.018000000000000002,-0.9873,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,10,3,2,3,0,6,1,1,2,1,16,14,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,0,0,10,2,7,14,6,1,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,42,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25391155708043656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18754653209916355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21115572711245076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37881961806005604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24204449029327954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905154754440236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558830768307808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694667661637803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084260462097114,0.0,0.0,0.1636460319186497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802206192927728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5125883858193581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117393034845987,0.0,0.0,0.14460156808768224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Walleyisgood234,2020/03/13,"Panic attack live, please help. Please. I think I’m having a panic attack, help, now, please?

I know it’s stupid to think I’ve got Covid-19- but I’ve had a sore throat become more and more noticeable, and you know, I coughed a few times. But no shortness of breath. But my face feels numb, and I know it’s stupid to just say I’ve got it, but hear me out, I work in an old folks home-as a cook no less. (So you can imagine my problem here.) And I shake hands with all the people and breath in their face, and I’m so ducking scared right now. And I feel like my panicking isn’t going to make my little sore throat feel better. 

I want to ducking take work off- but I’m two days into training, and I don’t want to look like a slacker. I’m literally having the worst panic attack of my life. I don’t even know if I suffer from anxiety, but hey, the shoe fits, right? I’m going ducking crazy. I’m sorry. I just need to vent. Really, I don’t like to talk about my problems, you know? Like other people aren’t responsible for solving my problems, I am, right? 

so I’m sorry if it’s just another ducking coronavirus post. It feels like I’ve got insects crawling in my throat, and I hate it. I’m 19, and I’ve had bad strings of luck with jobs in the past, and I really need this one, you know? And I understand, that I’m probably going to survive, even if I do have it, but I’m worried about the senior citizens I work with. Guys. Guys please, please. I don’t want to talk to my parents about it, I just feel like I bug them with my germaphobia.


Edit: Swears have been replaced, because I’m a good Christian boi.",0.42259411196911145,2.553025241071431,2.2801930501930516,94.88913127413127,85.27976190476191,5.180051480051482,19.200128700128698,6.5153245180268975,-0.010809909909910598,1235,34,279,13,37,408,147,336,0.24100000000000002,0.608,0.151,-0.9908,3,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,0,4,2,5,15,27,6,5,12,0,16,15,9,1,1,58,57,25,0,11,14,1,6,6,0,0,5,2,0,3,11,18,1,0,15,1,0,4,8,18,0,2,6,9,39,9,29,51,6,25,1,1,1,0,17,13,0,4,13,151,50,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171141047494711,0.05961259670129877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26595363666920396,0.0,0.0,0.0650643219799183,0.04750250413733968,0.08606230731453425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689185438619112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050255334379290736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293777458289644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19700671827787652,0.1670094249785645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328601321421018,0.06535999570030186,0.18697180346857,0.0,0.0,0.1543164815811249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693504338430288,0.0,0.0,0.08782741096486274,0.0,0.10446329399628004,0.0,0.07816537118100858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732877844397967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569540498978322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055040902820435215,0.2284220219825978,0.07810156399889663,0.06880941618340065,0.0,0.06543757715488648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05201570401406447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556115884429695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871840429674561,0.08176943285316182,0.0,0.05280416057813343,0.0,0.0,0.2742854440323397,0.08652675921014147,0.0,0.07438846074179938,0.10804710194959814,0.0,0.0,0.4276925750354443,0.0,0.0,0.07463084113687396,0.0,0.08401659051880571,0.22369179716298826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984181059910227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19964319221319046,0.0,0.06196927998520725,0.07801676122986016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17446185676726414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05859008393240761,0.12526671523794278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986269694940424,0.0,0.0,0.0454388351632577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612163827734779,0.08112292491555564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13788697979595713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701915123896617,0.07913686564915062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,praise_YAH313,2020/03/13,What is happiness What is happiness cause I can find it in black and milds or stuffed woods.,2.4333333333333336,5.084441222222225,2.342222222222226,94.30000000000004,81.22222222222223,8.044444444444443,25.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.0348,74,3,16,2,2,22,15,18,0.0,0.6759999999999999,0.324,0.802,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,4,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,10,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4053241683237092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3606227932436041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8400378084145227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shirtdresswithpocket,2020/03/13,"Psych wards For those of you that been admitted, what was it like? Met any interesting people? Any interesting stories? Did you get the help you needed/expected?

There’s a lot of stereotypes portrayed by the media that I’m sure aren’t true, so I’m very interested in hearing your experiences.",3.0115873015873014,6.060934444444449,4.244497354497355,78.37166666666667,84.18518518518519,7.530158730158732,26.232804232804238,8.418075326091056,2.4839026455026456,236,10,41,6,7,77,45,54,0.0,0.652,0.348,0.9602,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,4,0,0,2,6,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,2,4,10,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,4,6,5,6,1,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,1,1,24,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4866600149988653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500168178147539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869462870315008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4032893731709691,0.0,0.23983933883687536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748128764732722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042059399212224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24806747426282466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372413057040103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952391405668189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,awmytoothbrush,2020/03/14,Suicidal significant other How do you deal with a significant other who is depressed with suicidal thoughts? How do you help yourself to deal with it and how do you help them?,4.803958333333334,7.517227312500001,5.532500000000002,74.39583333333336,72.75,9.266666666666666,32.541666666666664,9.725611199111238,3.711904166666667,142,7,24,4,3,46,19,32,0.27699999999999997,0.526,0.19699999999999998,-0.7691,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,3,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,3,0,8,5,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,4,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,9,0,0,0,0,21,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.590164258457588,0.24652243480161745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3836969062949373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6261604324245743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272281543828839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bemore-game,2020/03/14,"How many voices should I hear? I have 2, one is me and the other is like a person with a different perspective on my situation and We talk to eachother. Is this normal? I've asked my mom and she only has 1 voice which made me question myself and I just wanted to make sure that it is normal to have 2 voices.",0.6036263736263763,2.723092615384616,3.0991208791208815,89.3823076923077,84.38461538461539,5.560439560439562,16.978021978021978,6.868970318607317,0.0026483516483515324,240,5,51,3,7,83,47,65,0.0,0.914,0.086,0.6322,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,8,0,0,3,1,16,13,5,0,4,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,4,0,1,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,10,2,5,11,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,1,1,38,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22505291424125992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251514809962208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713236542230347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176100130708391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277874417660488,0.1606911866697971,0.2440655379837572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28194365000635285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4717345720673426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631269514704345,0.18308833974579347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21019882221940625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696761212082012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705940454179016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268880598045631,0.0,0.0,0.1934921145772616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419905957870955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StefLess,2020/03/14,"Lost myself I wasn’t ready for a relationship a year after my mom passed away. But I fell hard. Her with her emotional baggage, me with mine. I tried my hardest although we weren’t compatible, but she ended up leaving me. My mental health was just spiraling out of control. It still is. I lost myself.",1.9588916256157631,4.6546050862069,3.5103940886699547,84.65258620689656,84.34482758620689,6.072906403940888,23.802955665024644,7.447530270364453,1.376750738916257,237,9,44,4,7,78,44,58,0.10800000000000001,0.836,0.057,-0.4118,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,1,0,8,6,3,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,5,1,16,0,8,1,0,9,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,36,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22744348005486806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715149175823883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723090347429085,0.2144123006980364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21685741901769676,0.0,0.0,0.25732124860477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25632928928993626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5285209730993866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439611515783473,0.0,0.0,0.2835228546541961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599048682145709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19332654928333587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435740591821127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15589250927123374
mentalhealth,aomameh,2020/03/14,"my grad school still requires us to fulfill our thesis requirements amidst coronavirus outbreak and metropolitan lockdown it's pretty much easy to conduct online courses for regular classes but ffs, we're conducting research and fieldwork and public libraries and resources are all shut down for a month. my employer still obliges us to report for work and offers nothing but hand sanitizers. above all, this government who's behind all my salary and commodity taxes is hopelessly incompetent when it comes to handling the present crisis. this year is exhausting and it's just march and it's starting to take toll on my overall mental health. i need rest.",8.363035714285715,10.540097803571435,7.359285714285718,67.2357142857143,62.03571428571429,9.885714285714286,39.89285714285714,10.125756701596842,4.707585714285715,542,29,75,12,8,166,83,112,0.203,0.75,0.047,-0.975,2,1,0,0,0,1,7.0,3,0,0,3,4,2,0,0,2,0,3,3,1,0,3,18,7,11,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,9,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,0,11,7,5,12,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,8,50,15,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20335055726204215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509278606384412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378997077636222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842618586628096,0.0,0.17353618496405995,0.17504046512623792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265123631609007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24016469903218654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389121010336161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16708922363391224,0.0,0.37704633938559545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774927777789427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5679183423234974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17185936743886307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15201921354373502
mentalhealth,myneemo,2020/03/14,"Friend keeps saying she needs to go to a mental health clinic, but doesn't go. Not entirely sure if I'm posting here to ask for advice or if it's just to put it out there (like a rant) 

I have a friend who is extremely depressed and has high anxiety. The virus situation is causing her to be even more anxious to the point she has not left her house in days. She's also worrying about money because her job isn't accessible right now (because of the virus) and so she's not got a regular income. 

Before this she was considering going to a clinic somewhere (it's been a really hard couple of months mentally) and today she said she thinks she has reached breaking point and that she should go. But is scared about going, again because of the  virus, but also about being able to afford it. 

I know I'm not really in the position to do anything. I'm trying to be there for her, and she knows it, and talks to me. But I'm not the one going through it and have never been through this before so I don't even know what to say when they get really down.",3.7950155763239866,4.7105432990654235,5.0272710280373865,84.43003426791277,71.61682242990653,8.136573208722742,25.014330218068533,8.447377352677275,1.46688199376947,822,23,171,13,15,273,112,214,0.10099999999999999,0.861,0.037000000000000005,-0.9279,3,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,16,6,0,1,12,0,19,3,0,1,2,31,39,19,0,4,13,0,1,1,2,1,3,3,0,0,11,8,0,1,4,0,1,7,9,2,0,1,5,4,19,4,26,30,1,25,0,1,0,0,23,9,0,3,8,122,30,1,0.11881763797038986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610722068100025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19003684431458107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089516782917166,0.13423011081050348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777679213076286,0.0,0.11107845230018758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21729038784391727,0.0,0.20221011716050635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205844402029745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146945646664351,0.0,0.07662754695296221,0.0,0.10233745747870636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695585856722066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835964247120572,0.0,0.062077311822371126,0.0,0.4051608108726846,0.0,0.09502931928271634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643726545894296,0.0,0.0,0.1262975929992854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553735805671648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370996014563881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790817182330908,0.10561057596877613,0.0,0.0,0.19589719943654085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909571131054526,0.0,0.0,0.05804829620161644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394804657349072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483910504157676,0.0,0.0,0.08810177302222003,0.0916394872777994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051390651337617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22464214627322596,0.0,0.11379445294689895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944454381205732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22835286415000405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146961361816877,0.11302278267515675,0.1889771094096836,0.11895718351289425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335560033425982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198421763810606,0.0,0.0,0.09550111666846577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613354476548112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262522781418215,0.0,0.0,0.08066937678729963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066507890432893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wasthereaniner,2020/03/14,"Male perspective on body dysmorphia When I was 13, during my physical my doctor told me that if i didnt put on muscle, women would never be attracted to and love me.
To say that it fucked me up would be an understatement.
I also have extreme penile dysmorphia, when in reality I am decently above average, but mentally I feel as if I'm only a couple inches hard. This has affected every romantic relationship ive had, even preventing me from attempting some relstionships.
Fuck this disorder.",6.7940000000000005,8.098055066666667,8.484444444444447,60.95000000000002,65.0,13.555555555555555,35.0,12.745084868956482,5.6656666666666675,396,18,61,17,6,139,71,90,0.187,0.7490000000000001,0.064,-0.8691,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,2,0,2,0,11,5,1,1,1,11,17,8,0,4,3,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,2,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,3,12,2,8,9,1,9,0,0,0,3,6,5,2,3,3,47,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17966288513812126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495498980244505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24858528820061546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574832120255257,0.2299520557540909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14838776391612665,0.0,0.18928823047832727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359634116887415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4153945662123123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20125388071494665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20276708966143184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264074188525828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732739220785339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17086630211267315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258483235993663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24120393750799302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17866100031319607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214675082647546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31918823679351777,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JulesOnR,2020/03/14,"I think I'm going to break I just started my first time teaching (as a learning student/internship) and it's been really eating at me. I do think I could've dealt with it...

If it wasn't for all the insecurity right now. It feels like I'm starting to disassociate. This whole virus is messing with me. All my mates are super happy and relieved but I just know this will be more work in the long run. I completely understand why my country is probably going to close all schools, but my depression and disassociation is rising to the surface more and more. I've been so stressed about it and I'm nothing but exhausted and grumpy.",2.8413414634146332,5.214465430894312,4.332703252032523,82.25564024390245,77.6178861788618,7.3520325203252055,27.32317073170732,8.344100000000001,2.0475804878048787,500,21,97,10,12,166,79,123,0.091,0.8190000000000001,0.09,-0.4783,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,5,9,0,2,4,0,10,2,0,0,3,24,22,12,0,1,6,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,7,9,1,0,6,0,0,4,1,5,0,1,3,1,12,4,11,17,7,16,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,1,7,66,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236169538161817,0.0,0.0,0.1702843886897037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18369523090201895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182356908874086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783929662910806,0.15236518393514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814133697807035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424205517033132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270374106296469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721150192747305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419640507918076,0.0,0.0,0.18874349862421785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046451041538026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22994875773587384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663075456641566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18213745545717247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158477847184797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019172207324564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443081671254233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27331867391749953,0.0,0.0,0.1243635766964086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220289551509136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924493857221692,0.2381162360180575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15526824963787958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Acebk1776,2020/03/14,"I want to be normal pls help me Hi, I’d really appreciate it if you would share or donate to this GoFundMe. https://www.gofundme.com/f/help-me-pay-for-3-months-at-mental-health-facility?utm_source=customer&utm_medium=more&utm_campaign=p_cf+share-flow-1",28.885,38.319320833333336,16.04666666666667,-5.734999999999957,28.16666666666667,8.200000000000001,20.5,8.841846274778883,2.0501,236,3,18,3,3,58,22,24,0.0,0.618,0.382,0.8173,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,3,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,11,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6575320017681245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3225316288885595,0.0,0.0,0.4067651227965907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30578581454401715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29729672491389725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19438486378777214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17897072462202468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155477843337045,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thesqueekyhinge,2020/03/14,I feel at the end of my rope I feel terrified for no reason yet calm at the same time. I'm scared to go to work tomorrow and I feel like the world is closing in on me. How to I stop feeling so scared.  I'm taking my meds but I still don't understand why I feel this way.,-0.5380107526881694,0.9670262741935504,2.143225806451614,98.1015053763441,84.64516129032258,6.068817204301076,18.397849462365595,7.1686216300943375,-0.06581505376344055,207,5,55,3,6,72,44,62,0.162,0.759,0.078,-0.6059,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,2,0,13,12,4,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,7,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,5,9,2,9,12,1,14,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,7,32,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19880368633343867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5674650321761209,0.16035326028069985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756498834149654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096591283681159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493228909573268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307808122258668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44944440787175893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792529185057262,0.18765743035082788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16876492413324448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308836078452614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23366930630505497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17816477964994462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20253896357782408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16340852552056942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NewLife99999,2020/03/14,"Train Wreck.. lol Okay.... wow. I don’t know where to even start. 

My whole life has been emotional and unbalanced. Been on meds since I was 7, I’ll be 27 next month. 

In 2018, I came off of my Prozac, Elavil for sleep and Xanax. All cold turkey (lesson fucking learned not to do this again).

What followed was a year and a half of dissociation and insane... something. I felt like I wasn’t even me anymore. I couldn’t find joy in anything. Nothing. I may as well have been dead. I couldn’t feel the clothes against my skin it was so bad. Reality warped. Twisted itself right in front of me. And I denied it all and pretended everything was okay just to make a point that I didn’t need meds. Now I know I DO. 

During that year and a half, what I will say I learned, was how to be a better person. Somehow, my values in life changed, my morals changed, and I realize now how much I took for granted, including life itself. Truth be told, my soul really has grown. Big time. 

But now, what I have no more than anything, is hope. Sure, maybe it’s blind hope. But it kept me going. It kept me from being suicidal. It kept me from hating myself. My hope kept me alive. My hope kept me from knowing I deserve so much better than what I have. And the things I carried for so long, things I superseded, I came to terms with. I think. 

Anyway..

Now I’m here, in 2020, back on my meds for one week. Same thing i was taking before. 

I’ve been anxious, dissociated, (prior to today everything felt fake.. this morning everything felt WAY too real) hypersensitive to an EXTREME, literally numb as I don’t know what.. and yet, I feel emotional out of nowhere. Like I want to cry. For no reason. Also there have been maybe 2 moments in the last week where I actually laughed. It felt *real*

So do you all think this my medicine kicking back in, and regulating everything normally again? 

Thanks for anyone who responds.",0.8529380053908362,3.382932353099733,2.248032345013481,92.43086253369276,89.35040431266846,5.292722371967655,20.50943396226415,6.868970318607317,0.4760102425876012,1457,48,305,21,49,468,193,371,0.102,0.76,0.138,0.8993,1,0,1,0,0,0,80.0,0,1,0,3,27,22,2,0,9,3,33,10,2,4,5,64,69,22,2,9,4,0,7,2,0,2,7,1,0,1,23,15,0,5,18,1,0,7,9,5,1,3,26,10,47,17,38,35,9,47,2,0,1,1,6,16,1,6,25,204,70,2,0.0,0.0,0.08090205290962528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662980595212931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365758422438417,0.08221819423498278,0.05796819515729011,0.0,0.1364453636949609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12749565704225113,0.06922112721944221,0.0,0.0,0.07054494317492874,0.0,0.0,0.14664317239535626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896394956738984,0.0,0.0,0.17540224546728325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106582239374086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18651100957580924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951422489714367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2980340022176418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383720413289908,0.0,0.3184022149477584,0.0,0.0757724805398108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664313543221102,0.0,0.0,0.04711608364124579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185024086444531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32936832366587243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18224682320794786,0.06757758110427875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756720067373744,0.08100512109775407,0.0,0.0,0.0733671663185021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05533886399488965,0.0,0.16657582079553834,0.0,0.27626196662775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617294297503958,0.0,0.12188751811685032,0.061472043622126535,0.0,0.0,0.08816902624806011,0.0,0.08122802459280358,0.07954833677536129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0561776931791124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238831373240487,0.0,0.0,0.0783707940338106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887251227207092,0.05311023355805507,0.08523881194203395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079930744507527,0.0,0.06592835033118792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857879794684782,0.0,0.08296357279092936,0.0,0.0,0.06382331913011396,0.0,0.0,0.05867966607951775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906831927832208,0.0,0.07813575681278502,0.0,0.06233326545590905,0.0,0.0,0.0763265891684779,0.0,0.0,0.16523260493523345,0.10624268784580357,0.0,0.0,0.048341814589413716,0.0,0.07858301461650752,0.07921803880731305,0.0921090619334932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04889875065122233,0.06580509878963578,0.13300069610251966,0.0,0.07454038329024065,0.0,0.0,0.09255902120292127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677453033071352
mentalhealth,heko99289,2020/03/14,"I used to be the smartest kid, now I’m a sore loser I was the top student in class throughout high school and then life happened. Not to be rude but my fellow students who used to get lower test scores than me and used to rank lower than me, had less ECs than me are way ahead of me now. Mental health got the best of me and I’ve been failing in everything I do. I just want to ask someone, am I still really that kid? Is it possibly I could defeat mental health and go back to being successful like I was? It seems hard now because my life has completely changed. I just want someone to give me some hope. Please :(",1.6261548556430476,3.5803083543307075,2.753248031496064,94.1732316272966,79.62992125984252,5.808136482939633,21.606955380577435,6.816661863887847,0.3568167979002629,479,14,106,5,12,153,82,127,0.154,0.65,0.19699999999999998,0.7579,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,8,7,8,1,0,4,0,13,5,0,3,0,17,27,6,0,4,4,0,1,1,1,0,5,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,5,1,16,4,15,18,3,13,0,3,0,0,6,4,0,3,8,69,20,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473649446546019,0.0,0.0,0.1212095275162543,0.0,0.09609120195535223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654253994736607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667540980735831,0.0,0.1652744932102176,0.0,0.0,0.12585658449420267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166976911459514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235638354311799,0.15121528932142592,0.08958608268012085,0.0,0.12607296992954534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393937440108359,0.0,0.14120760065287488,0.0,0.0,0.33511157955371873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16654720550226576,0.0,0.1565644658669866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22268074514269406,0.07701119145887396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.317712615256013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730329562572704,0.0,0.17770676123816265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098330351309832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15953232803278344,0.0,0.14350254801426576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26712271411000754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588537800762015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084311507931656,0.0,0.0,0.18595125826460515,0.12512120204704594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dependent02848,2020/03/14,"Is it true that if you restart an old antidepressant, it will start to work quickly? If somebody has been on a certain antidepressant for years, their brain is probably used to it. So if they stop and decided to go back on it in the future, will it work quicker?",6.0947058823529385,6.2087541568627485,6.310588235294119,80.09764705882355,66.25490196078431,9.937254901960783,34.64705882352941,9.725611199111238,3.0809294117647053,206,9,42,4,3,66,38,51,0.045,0.8590000000000001,0.096,0.4208,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,2,2,3,2,0,0,3,0,6,1,1,1,2,9,9,5,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,7,6,0,11,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,7,32,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576821590017539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3740983117857219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19045314072713868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516460141490384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613098213776778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371955781970083,0.0,0.0,0.28017050333138577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28943110027892344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4879343041002645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158025782234968
mentalhealth,fedupanddead,2020/03/14,"I'm in isolation and might be going insane So a little context: I'm in isolation at college, in a suite all by myself, because several girls in my dorm are showing symptoms of coronavirus and I have a very compromised immune system (I have alopecia, type 1 diabetes, an ileostomy, anemia, etc.). I just moved here a week ago after spending most of the day with my roommate.
I've always had a little bit of social anxiety, but it wasn't that bad. The worst of it was when I would be in my dorm alone, and I was always on edge that my roommate would come back. I was constantly listening for any footsteps that passed our door, or watching the clock to see how much time was left until she got off work. And I always had a mini heart attack if she started opening the door, whether I heard her coming or not. And I never had to hide anything, so I don't know why I was so anxious. Even when she was just sitting in the dorm, minding her own business, I was ALWAYS on edge and anxious about it. 
Now that I've moved into the suite by myself, I've been acting very strange lately. I've been mumbling things to myself, not like I'm talking to myself but just random words. I'm trying to unpack my belongings and put them away but I'm only making a mess. I've stayed in bed for 2/3's of the day, and I feel groggy overall but not sleepy. That being said, I've taken 4 naps and slept 12 hours last night. I'll wander around my room in circles, not thinking about anything in particular, just kind of drifting in my mind. I'll try to sleep at a reasonable hour but my mind just won't shut off, it just keeps playing thoughts, songs, or sometimes it even plays uncomfortable past experiences like a broken record. I never get hungry, and I wouldn't eat if it weren't for the fact that the person who gives me my food comes back later for the empty container. I have the window open for fresh air, but I catch myself getting stuck listening to the people walking by outside and being afraid that they'll say something about me or my room (I don't think they even know I exist). I always feel like someone is watching me, or as if someone was in my room while I was asleep - I've even had a lot of dreams of this kind. I get anxious when I hear people walking by my door because I'm afraid it might be someone coming to check on me, and for some reason that scares me. 
I can't really leave my dorm because I'm in isolation - I can't go to the cafeteria, I had to quit work, my classes are online, and I have to do my laundry at night when no one is up and walking around. Someone has to bring me my food and leave it outside my door for me to grab. It's been over 24 hours since I've seen another person. I never was this anxious or paranoid when I was living with my roommate, but I always had a deep wish that I didn't have one (nothing against her). Am I going insane? Do normal people do this?",5.558571796059064,5.092579988115453,6.196036425374285,82.430163091012,67.45500848896435,8.497628234809897,30.24237279415548,7.5764669431780325,1.8144279569892472,2259,73,461,20,33,740,258,589,0.129,0.828,0.043,-0.9938,0,4,1,0,0,0,66.0,1,0,3,3,28,14,1,3,25,0,53,11,4,4,5,86,94,44,0,8,27,0,3,3,0,7,3,7,13,3,23,26,4,2,9,6,2,18,17,7,0,2,31,14,72,7,67,51,9,89,0,0,4,0,23,37,0,15,34,313,95,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05938590799813478,0.0,0.0,0.06938530998684521,0.0,0.0,0.33446494869974397,0.0,0.0,0.045558040251712964,0.07024877727854284,0.05125002743587564,0.302735427022386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102602789338878,0.1192772635106808,0.0,0.07621505034282264,0.06294282366774984,0.10302810097502106,0.05593697424851163,0.12251628556847018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07313981243361432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308366985903556,0.0,0.07239643256225796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641083959631103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855132063201594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471572866650057,0.17699493273194344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655327324346473,0.0,0.0,0.06774809537241999,0.04786034096724597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620181917343672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500439165328906,0.06426649957481965,0.11422225828435405,0.0,0.053581013565044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550681350327881,0.07938790400656556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979260159800482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059547113946593275,0.0,0.13952734107012862,0.07363601450997995,0.054608839321891735,0.07557185632810827,0.14187339424074882,0.07278889411320226,0.0,0.0,0.0981892715748052,0.1342906539631092,0.05915669946263283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05695568170223945,0.0,0.0,0.04471884140821383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421395415981768,0.20293373772955905,0.0,0.0,0.14240748591311012,0.04924810701581775,0.0,0.15500910607338705,0.0,0.0,0.12573817269739862,0.06563964070537331,0.06428229999215508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907933835500496,0.05095175783106095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395310496257438,0.1393350712525608,0.11699269872639155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06734721210855124,0.0,0.07125608850341973,0.0,0.0,0.04291790507038934,0.13776144423247952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372638778627998,0.053276110674006866,0.06707242050741567,0.0,0.05338533676479075,0.0,0.0,0.0756838567555965,0.0,0.05541791370408748,0.0,0.06704212169297481,0.0682916808173642,0.22705431269300946,0.05157505377394361,0.06625852150514752,0.0,0.04741851371468745,0.07140641262935825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06963214690519012,0.0,0.05384703022512957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044507663765601835,0.08585376651384817,0.0,0.053185545981319984,0.03906458831914048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096870322862734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055370266945508,0.0,0.0,0.05373833691941945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060451429793311126,0.0,0.07703949431587821,0.0,0.0,0.0975444806632432,0.0,0.0,0.0951808609570208,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iwannaburnyouteehee,2020/03/14,"I’m not sure if my parents divorced is the cause for current mental health issues My parents divorced when I was 3 I am currently 15M and I often tell myself that because I was so young it won’t have done anything to me, but I’m not so sure. I often find myself feeling an intense sadness when there’s nothing to distract me my base mood is sadness. I know it may seem like I’m just an angsty teenager looking for attention and that’s why I never talk to anyone about it, but I feel like this is something more than hormones or whatever else anybody I have talked to has tried to tell me. I also don’t know how to talk about it fully to anyone I generally just give them a hint of it and will talk briefly but change topics finding myself uncomfortable. My father also hasn’t lived close to me since the divorce he has always been at least a 5-7 hours flight away from me and that’s how the divorce got finalised that he eventually just left. I still see him a decent amount and I get along with him but there’s always a slight resentment I suppose. I’m just not sure if being so young could be any cause for current problems or if it’s something else possibly that I haven’t yet confronted.",5.099357923497268,5.345461586065576,5.7458032786885225,82.84072677595631,68.38524590163935,7.98207650273224,31.020765027322412,7.554174236665415,1.9258112568306007,953,36,190,9,15,310,133,244,0.11599999999999999,0.833,0.051,-0.9436,5,0,2,0,4,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,21,12,2,1,9,0,21,1,0,4,4,46,35,23,0,5,16,3,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,12,8,0,0,8,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,5,4,30,5,20,24,3,15,0,2,2,0,19,4,0,9,13,131,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889032240353521,0.19655206468861228,0.0,0.0,0.08031807437029594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516892101805225,0.0,0.09719352758121108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096716110901353,0.0,0.0,0.07199806431160681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426606659285976,0.12494351234053952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430031345287032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086636946500375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973295929004356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943877595488402,0.08437699260012503,0.0,0.0,0.21589871514307415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061707004160108714,0.11330077992489762,0.0,0.0,0.09446244413885274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554419429305982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163134350780462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327496334284845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981908038773432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283256210849842,0.0,0.0,0.11540404537651093,0.0,0.10429228651384627,0.0,0.09918169523803767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902595055705363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910928333827037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133286358003395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622918217648125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314999254747004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301422728898475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941174691638879,0.1075218695423454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770086882005824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18185194015284112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432188751156252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339486060592041,0.0,0.0,0.3797257085112581,0.20646469757055805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018816251662135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657487475544623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Teengohanssj,2020/03/14,"Just needed to get this off my chest Hi,

I'm 17 yrs old, I am just tired of caring. I'm just tired of caring about people that don't seem to care about me or caring about things in general. Like I'm tired caring about whether on not women will ever be attracted to me or if I'll ever be in a real relationship, when it doesn't seem like it will ever change. I'm tired of wondering whether or not I deserve a partner. I'm tired of waking up every day and feeling like I'm failure no matter what I accomplish.

I have family members, that I wonder if they will ever check on me. I understand you that should check on people regardless if they check on you or not but I just wonder if they care whether or not I'm alright. I have friends but I'm not close them due to my anxiety, OCD, my pessimistic attitude, etc. I hate being emotionally isolated but I enjoy being alone, I ask people for their phone number but then won't call or text them, due to my stupid trust issues. I sit and go back and forth in my head wondering if I'm unlikable or I just push everybody away.  I also wonder if I will meet anyone boy or girl who is willing to put with me and my issues.

Idk, what to think. Sigh, maybe this is just all in my head and I'm just overreacting. Maybe I need go see a therapist, I've definitely considered it. 

You don't have give advice, but I would appreciate it though.",2.3063421052631594,3.9272830421052634,4.236337719298248,85.84082236842106,76.47368421052632,7.55701754385965,22.75219298245614,8.344100000000001,1.2631666666666663,1077,31,228,20,24,367,137,285,0.154,0.716,0.13,-0.7291,0,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,3,6,1,20,17,2,0,3,1,21,9,4,0,5,64,56,31,0,11,34,0,1,3,2,8,5,0,0,4,13,7,0,0,10,0,3,4,10,2,1,0,0,2,37,14,28,44,2,28,0,0,1,0,22,12,0,21,14,153,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605499468492828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060885227087043,0.0,0.06224096614970963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05954006534293488,0.0,0.0,0.0544208457773318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276094501057387,0.0,0.07312425029890371,0.059846795905490226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947357022516044,0.0,0.4761198584629362,0.0,0.08233427419701426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05019418811374847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754875721383476,0.0,0.0,0.08680150215557499,0.0,0.2816083165214123,0.06557549343974207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337160196354046,0.0,0.03935340357017656,0.05560207420552926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060131596569739924,0.0,0.04066318694921325,0.07466203971957115,0.08846565308837773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684143559817658,0.15975294897423128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624694943076888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407204909019568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563822545992517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542055420217605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816699430076313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187345962536293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824107830234424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858806773286347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356075378657173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06202077537045745,0.1417077993605064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903671271359304,0.05170707883387948,0.04987059640667935,0.07646800156880314,0.0,0.0,0.4472731455055634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810242216839541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.422018902474348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05528850387317838,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,madsmj_,2020/03/14,"I want to tell the truth on my depression test, but I'm scared I have depression. I've known this for a while, as the symptoms are pretty clear. For the past 4 years, I've gone through many periods of suicidal thoughts, depressive states, etc. I have never really told anyone before, and I have never told my parents. When I visited the doctor for the past 4 years, I lied on my depression tests. I know this seems wrong, and it is, but I'm just so scared of what will happen next if I tell the truth. I don't want to be on meds. I know that they will help me but I don't want to be on them. I guess seeing a therapist would be okay, but I don't want that stress either. The worst of all will be telling my parents. If they find out I've self-harmed and that I've been suicidal, they'll be absolutely beside themselves. Telling the truth would dramatically change the rest of my life. Recently though, it has just gotten too much for me, and I need help. If any of you have gone through the process of getting diagnosed and getting treatment, if you're willing to share what that's like, it would be greatly appreciated :)",4.4704000000000015,5.197328573333337,4.944444444444446,86.33000000000001,69.93333333333334,8.666666666666668,27.88888888888889,8.841846274778883,1.833355555555556,879,29,190,15,15,280,114,225,0.18600000000000005,0.631,0.183,-0.8656,2,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,4,0,6,16,0,3,12,1,25,4,0,0,7,39,46,18,2,12,11,2,0,1,0,8,4,0,0,0,11,6,0,0,6,0,0,3,5,9,0,0,7,1,26,7,22,25,6,20,0,4,1,0,17,5,0,6,12,123,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158361101075232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360353124697529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957251325840132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135610329086824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3626573544613064,0.10684146265128344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774288892019132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11739797470868152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962100359333235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999293040993807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605471200889987,0.11596094333209482,0.0,0.09308523349946092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14111342955853842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570146103609727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435157619351375,0.05142701912406997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672189179893236,0.0,0.0,0.11692536017876025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738167217374213,0.07805244705790375,0.16237326409673755,0.0,0.111950210988212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337680016324915,0.0,0.2009741491634337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070920512172317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06743526729817206,0.0,0.10393619976144387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21077667224598956,0.0,0.08388234347953782,0.09582903655014198,0.10981404765518983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058036717656412,0.0,0.0,0.2302850104435544,0.0,0.0,0.10941033658086896,0.0,0.0,0.3680239775222836,0.0,0.0,0.1222204390770303,0.0,0.0,0.10342204099311424,0.08356841984172357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011698787190856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483514079905017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243310847691599,0.11509043329061384,0.0,0.1355740412178321
mentalhealth,Summi_E,2020/03/14,I just want to die I'm tired of fake promises from guys. And it's not like I hide my unstable mental condition from them. They know from the start that I'm screwed up. They promise to help me through it..but always leave me. I feel so alone. I know I have family. But I really wish to have a true love. I just want to die.,-0.9215396825396844,1.1425913857142866,1.2661904761904772,99.83769841269842,92.28571428571428,5.396825396825397,16.349206349206348,6.937597516519254,-0.2534126984126983,247,6,62,4,9,82,47,70,0.292,0.45899999999999996,0.249,-0.6923,0,1,0,0,0,2,10.0,0,0,3,0,3,7,1,0,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,12,12,3,2,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,13,5,10,12,0,2,0,0,0,2,6,1,1,0,2,35,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441703244697649,0.0,0.0,0.19616643893657745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4893514239591119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22224814463433454,0.0,0.11920444278787967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23343379302828876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802111802919422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591287631196129,0.0,0.0,0.2496297322297629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517762815796538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21277743358721746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23758485466747797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15103022251520254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686808608024306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709648530851773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27810795384647385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711057762465994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imsorrymomanddad-,2020/03/14,"My world is decaying Hello, how is everyone? I hope everyone is well. I’m not so good today. No one will see this. No one will care. I know but please help me if by any chance you see this. 


The moon seems so unbalanced. nothing feels the same. I’m falling apart. I don’t know what to do anymore. I don’t feel like this is reality. Help me. Nobody cares. Nobody listens. I feel like I’m fading away. I don’t want to be forgotten. I hate this place so much but I can’t leave. I have nobody, nothing.",-1.8842857142857128,-0.43879923809523547,0.8571428571428577,97.82285714285715,112.8095238095238,4.285714285714287,15.476190476190474,6.1826913282559595,-0.3150952380952381,380,11,88,6,21,129,62,105,0.152,0.593,0.255,0.9212,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,0,5,9,1,0,2,0,13,0,0,1,0,14,30,7,0,3,4,0,3,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,7,2,1,2,0,6,13,7,4,27,2,8,0,0,2,0,5,4,0,3,5,52,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332761133848787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16527186911224478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15657301801733067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3398212534273502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3184821428617627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527895113201147,0.23810936948542796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397779858930114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16453222332142295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22340376063522446,0.0,0.0,0.16552090138056091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317279643275464,0.0,0.0,0.17645812674287625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16283339589320708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250681329153534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198100475439621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22585249993670226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17411362159662738,0.18293148914504587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655967053291769,0.15171176273106682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579645700929176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829439812657062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14983822723607632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frankiscool13,2020/03/14,"Feel a lot of things I can’t articulate easily. Hi. I’ve been feeling almost like I’m going crazy but not in the sense that I’m losing my sanity. I feel quite disconnected from everyone and everything pretty much. I’ve looked into derealization/depersonalization but I don’t feel like it 100% fits the profile of how I feel it. I feel like every encounter I have socially feels painfully awkward all of a sudden with people I don’t know well. I feel like every time anyone whispers about anything it’s somehow about me and what I’m doing in that moment.  Whenever I’m with friends now I feel out of place like I shouldn’t be there. I don’t really feel motivated to be around anyone because of this. I’ve been playing piano for 6 years but feel like I’m terrible at it now, same with art in general.  I honestly just feel like even more stupid then I ever have in my life and have trouble reading books now. Overall just feel isolated and helpless. I’m not looking for pity I just want to know what’s wrong and what I should do. Am I just overreacting? I know most people my age are dealing with the same shit and worse. Thanks.",3.014066666666668,5.062486884444444,4.530833333333334,82.61625000000002,75.71111111111111,7.522222222222222,25.027777777777786,8.395991825355821,1.6971111111111117,899,31,176,17,20,300,121,225,0.17600000000000002,0.624,0.2,0.0712,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,3,16,22,2,1,5,0,17,3,1,2,2,52,44,11,0,3,9,0,13,7,1,2,2,1,0,0,11,13,0,0,17,4,0,1,7,10,1,0,2,16,21,12,24,38,7,21,0,3,2,0,4,10,1,4,17,110,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816194772949552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13708840223818014,0.0,0.08066956738516476,0.08726665068625765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059757607786522726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106366095659336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474727250333452,0.08867290102137793,0.1651874294349723,0.09367097197928677,0.08810220213387254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6443637252705151,0.35015991597927976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573701198530551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055712176380279685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162263034132734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924082725092065,0.3352443445922689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463944969369454,0.10966944820217177,0.0,0.08334080500198486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206264170411586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430983608656824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13592202049195207,0.0,0.10241950787720566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973080058154793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426597662747628,0.0980555924589359,0.0,0.06279992883351579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006254258930499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992828606656737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025199188110937,0.0,0.0,0.06512615451387148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05716153578160564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057820082029724974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813990171466925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989999148281338,0.0,0.1071793930631452,0.0,0.06312750346570346
mentalhealth,DroidVoidvoid,2020/03/14,"Crying Over Small Things For some reason I cry over small things. I used to take it as I was sensitive, but I feel like that isn’t it anymore. For example, I live with my parents. We don’t have a vacuum and we use a broom. We recently got a new broom and it’s really bad and I’ve gotten frustrated over it. After I asked if we could get a hand vacuum at the moment, my dad said no. For some reason I went to my room and started crying. I started thinking about how dirty my room already looks and our house. That eventually just turned into me hating myself. I knew I shouldn’t be crying over it, but I did. Has anyone had this, and/or know how to stop it?",1.3384278495227413,3.237221686131388,3.3345985401459863,89.92532285233017,80.31386861313868,6.55115103874228,18.567658618753512,7.61054688173877,0.4089285794497468,509,11,111,8,13,172,86,137,0.243,0.706,0.051,-0.9827,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,5,0,0,0,4,4,2,0,5,0,10,1,1,6,0,30,28,11,0,3,4,2,2,1,0,1,0,1,6,0,11,11,0,1,6,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,8,4,22,1,16,17,2,18,0,0,1,0,9,10,0,3,8,78,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15705499554673827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411443986119948,0.09951429997008103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305112047532433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883226655050362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136319063220852,0.0,0.625332670242583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196188063209877,0.10167430168372202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435695873526885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382727384788564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051273116070856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16421956925719644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821601562761968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953095484654621,0.0,0.12567223689219595,0.0,0.11951397285425736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745471258967573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15803086240388867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117461220651238,0.2926598172558812,0.14052502625321575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538006303445127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201471371552507,0.0,0.0,0.11898690524459885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700783869262698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891037774276794,0.09119368542721784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480460916819916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24583966187899775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319331885925985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imightcatchacase,2020/03/14,"I think I have schizophrenia. I’ve had anxiety, specifically social anxiety since my sophomore year of high school. I became a stoner my senior year of high school, and smoked weed often. Only after smoking weed did I experience my first bout of derealization (it felt like I was still high or in a dream) that lasted for about a week and a half.

My first year of college, I lived by myself, and I’m more introverted, so I had a hard time making friends. I did try to hang out with my high school friends, though. And I later developed what I believe to be depression: I cried all the time for no reason, I felt painfully lonely, extreme apathy, and just really dark thoughts. After becoming depressed, I started becoming really existential and genuinely believed in things like the simulation theory, concepts like the Truman Show, or just thought life wasn’t real. I felt like I was experiencing life differently. This is also when I first suspected I may have schizophrenia.

A year later, I live with actual roommates now, I’m not as depressed because I see a therapist. I do still have a tendency to feel depressed every once in a while, but I can normally bring myself out of it now.

I have been experiencing a lot of anxiety recently, specifically hypochondria. I used to think I’m gonna have a heart attack or a stroke for the mildest of reasons. Then, I started smoking again and had another existential crisis that lasted for months, and I became obsessed with philosophy, used to obsessively search on reddit about it, withdraw for conversations just to sit and think about it while making myself anxious. I don’t worry about that much anymore though. 

Then, I had basically a psychotic break while tripping on marijuana where I had a panic attack over suspicions about the government. And I don’t know if I just had a hallucination recently, but after smoking I thought someone rung the doorbell, and I look outside to see who it was while they were leaving, and it was a man in what looked like a postal worker uniform on a scooter/segway. But there was nothing left on our front doorstep, so I assume it was someone trying to sell us something. I asked my mom if she heard anything, but she said she was in the bathroom at the time so she didn’t hear anything.

I, as far as I know, have never experienced hallucinations, except for hypnagogic hallucinations, when I hear things right before I go to sleep when I’m in a dreamy state. I also occasionally see things out of the corner of my eye move or I think something’s there, it’s never been a figure of any sort, though.

I’ve had possible social delusions, like my roommates all hate me, people only compliment me because I’m pitifully ugly, my boyfriend is cheating on me with his best friend - just a lot of confused thinking (which could also just be distorted thinking). The more ridiculous delusions are only when I smoke weed and are only ever entertained for a few hours. I experience these delusions and believe them for a while until I bring myself to talk myself out of believing them, and I realize they’re ridiculous, but I can’t help but think they’re true most of the time.",7.737930245854777,7.909667229845628,7.977873070325903,69.33146369353918,62.80789022298456,10.703030303030305,36.02001143510577,10.368888859301958,3.8289867352773017,2517,107,426,53,33,824,261,583,0.151,0.7759999999999999,0.073,-0.9908,1,2,4,0,0,0,69.0,2,0,3,5,34,30,6,4,34,0,40,7,3,6,6,85,82,51,0,4,20,1,6,6,3,2,4,4,0,1,20,23,0,0,22,3,1,7,9,17,0,4,29,19,72,13,66,48,10,82,0,6,6,0,26,26,0,14,52,313,92,7,0.0,0.0,0.05882300173709391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446137914971128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04099136412219865,0.06320713517644591,0.13833838270628815,0.06809740966248723,0.059779953763444214,0.0,0.0,0.09920793820415147,0.0,0.05635214651382845,0.1371507142507903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349027957727107,0.13314546549638706,0.051292460026416964,0.2716523611874734,0.06325843890551902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04812737999373218,0.0,0.06621296785683403,0.0,0.0,0.2076707148244272,0.0,0.0,0.0629780754858121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05452524396783545,0.050787133310265895,0.0,0.0,0.11792764053542633,0.0,0.0,0.030478559115499838,0.0,0.1736300875815435,0.0,0.0,0.15381827278287585,0.0,0.0,0.13971277611289848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03425759137373292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05399758687188223,0.059512418874329925,0.0,0.0,0.1358762259710446,0.0714301682436598,0.040403326207568785,0.2547496637800771,0.0,0.0,0.05936206024569731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625484034451196,0.09826984675224863,0.0,0.06382609886688566,0.06549263414670804,0.0,0.08515280215047892,0.1766938244831528,0.0,0.10645382437621777,0.0,0.10123731216501668,0.0,0.0,0.1024930429221771,0.0,0.0,0.08047257086384546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059730787031382,0.04811362628730355,0.06406637639084667,0.044311543601537766,0.0,0.09298080242556546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590600121984633,0.057838729476335636,0.0,0.0,0.06419450537257801,0.0,0.1833776910841178,0.06414044420959983,0.07072368896466866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04178943759908155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795481428274774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860999086163336,0.07723174501722065,0.12395242401413885,0.11903525261554546,0.0,0.0,0.05147740551749613,0.0573385411555673,0.0,0.0,0.1830148101517605,0.14410218916491624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04986289724021698,0.0,0.06032191039512842,0.1228924308172492,0.1021473482582995,0.09281048074890394,0.0,0.0,0.0853306925000638,0.0,0.09627678118511827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04844947698939553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998784289645593,0.1201388278488718,0.2703676551373758,0.1776696012152662,0.14356289708552072,0.14059522799718907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185012386762366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250746693893421,0.10412232979041026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04835167895314568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061215618913587726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552691966948516
mentalhealth,TheLonelyLonerVI,2020/03/14,"I don't know who to talk to about this Hey Reddit, my life has been a series of twist and turns of lows and highs. My childhood was one full of abuse from my bipolar mother who would lash out at me for no reason, this has lead me to be a very fragile person. Im currently at university and feel the pain of my childhood coming back and haunting me. I feel as though I have a scare across my personality that will never heal. I know people have their own issues to worry about but it just feels good to get it off my chest. Thanks for reading",3.442767857142858,4.3977534553571465,4.303928571428571,89.14107142857144,72.48214285714286,6.671428571428571,22.035714285714285,6.6274283507984215,0.3110678571428571,425,9,93,3,8,137,78,112,0.11599999999999999,0.8170000000000001,0.067,-0.1655,1,0,0,0,1,0,7.0,0,0,1,1,5,5,0,1,4,0,10,5,1,2,1,17,19,7,0,1,2,1,4,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,7,6,0,0,6,1,0,2,3,3,0,1,2,4,14,2,20,14,2,15,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,0,5,68,21,2,0.0,0.23358402256691474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515919692615809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16982255028479062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990465832341168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299987648156717,0.0,0.0,0.16535547252084729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20829401264447628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21294991512202333,0.20576766236516547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216690948246218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392490069243543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15205000979191807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13359023099543474,0.0,0.2097756723047192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667518950970073,0.3442779867108371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19719787321149426,0.0,0.0,0.20269740412457168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19737605976693887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845729996895322,0.0,0.1815041896718856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19369349299198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21443662966192376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16266487820526931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20020983283469945,0.0,0.14004581286017972,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gotohui,2020/03/14,"Ressources on dealing with social isolation Looking for materials on treatment strategies or coping mechanisms for social isolation. Maybe something like a clinical manual for CBT in the context of enabling social interactions? But I'm open to anything. High level overviews or academic, don't care.

Bonus points if it's something also related to situations when normal social opportunities are suspended, e.g. during pandemic containment.",10.093482587064678,13.932648820895519,9.723208955223884,45.24113184079602,60.791044776119406,12.824875621890547,46.98756218905472,11.855464076750405,8.021917412935322,369,24,34,14,6,119,57,67,0.18600000000000005,0.746,0.068,-0.835,0,2,2,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,5,6,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,10,5,0,8,0,0,1,0,6,7,0,3,2,21,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952937836185107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538701928908752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19064053485944454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927701549631569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19755667043529876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09134992403498164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15701772491763175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18784847636205854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832025870835951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675835760828915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101755186299915,0.0,0.7624181039128735,0.0,0.2878956429019128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chae-ryeong,2020/03/14,"Help! My friend is cutting himself because he thinks I want him to He keeps telling how now I'm probably happy and was trying to accomplish this all along. He even sent pictures of the cuts.

He told me it was my fault, and I do get it. I have had a lot of my own issues for a long time and I haven't been able to talk nor reply to him like usual (he lives in another country). He gives me tons of anxiety but blames me for it (probably also because I usually blame things on myself). I have given up on trying to explain myself to him since it takes so much energy to do. I feel like I just can't anymore. I've had to apologize for countless times while I know many of the stuff is solely because of him. It really feels like I have no way to stop him.

He has my parents' contact info and I fear so much that he will use that card. He used it once and that got me into big trouble. Besides, I don't want him to hurt himself, even though it's hard for me to care for him. I have been numb for as long as I can recall but this incident really made me feel awful.

This is not the first time we have had a hard time in our friendship and my anxiety is just worsening day by day. What should I do to help him? How can I get out of this situation? Is it really my fault after all or is he just trying to get power over me?",2.236945288753798,3.159181407801423,4.167001013171227,89.10500000000002,75.34751773049645,7.499088145896658,23.357649442755818,7.957251820313856,0.9855053698074968,1015,28,233,15,21,347,141,282,0.165,0.721,0.114,-0.9521,2,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,2,0,0,3,12,14,2,1,6,1,29,1,0,5,2,37,52,19,0,3,7,1,5,3,1,2,1,0,0,0,18,10,0,2,7,0,0,1,6,8,0,1,12,5,43,6,38,38,7,26,0,1,0,0,34,9,0,2,18,167,61,1,0.10913692483306647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727675935891835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443958151124395,0.16697889755279272,0.0,0.10823450346788434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995865692177726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127236846206373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407685756896093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416781911477655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280938230840567,0.16554872517984145,0.15593488181466275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283181251038246,0.0,0.0,0.08431891740017979,0.0,0.17105861629445882,0.10469408296422172,0.0,0.0,0.08728676863682361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617828587767035,0.1955304959474896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630436041592595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683333525736606,0.0,0.0,0.113910594862476,0.0,0.09700591333042267,0.0,0.0,0.059978799711094336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599563662632858,0.0,0.09636990410875028,0.19316548827704685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927843107197082,0.0,0.10326799709749417,0.0,0.11064771206303443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16045639441563944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11622726310330793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118363954283673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23533612755152716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20974772597621485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902791920117752,0.12267447617026628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09124335598844596,0.0,0.0,0.1249356681533617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205738521658686,0.08772012614758144,0.09539048270878213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250572341184927,0.06993053467714844,0.10722647453005447,0.0,0.25455447410424714,0.0,0.0,0.1042850086381603,0.0,0.22229042407727012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18851852427620644,0.2403978079100405,0.0,0.1287435718135252,0.08662781102678149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway10110110010,2020/03/14,"Why does self harm help? And what counts as self harm? I have some mental health issues, and people always talk about self harm. I'm 28 I don't think I've ever self harmed I'm probably just ignorant but I think I should know more about it.

Is it hurting yourself because you feel like you deserve to be hurt?

Is it hurting yourself to create a distraction?

Is it hurting yourself to release tension?

What counts as self harm?

There are some things that are obvious like cutting, but does anything else count?

Is hitting your head against a wall self harm?

Is biting yourself self harm?

Is doing something you know will make you feel worse self harm? (like going to the pub for the reason you want to feel worse later)",2.413220802919706,5.164442270072993,2.4778421532846733,92.54844206204382,82.5036496350365,4.592883211678832,23.161040145985407,5.985473137389443,0.4611025547445253,569,20,107,4,16,171,78,137,0.34700000000000003,0.583,0.07,-0.9944,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,6,0,0,5,19,1,2,4,0,14,2,1,2,2,21,27,6,0,2,3,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,0,8,8,2,0,1,8,1,0,1,1,16,0,0,0,3,10,3,11,23,3,4,0,4,0,0,16,1,0,2,5,57,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682068580473868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759745104321258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05627964972836802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158612412484227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771245760261893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351204130709715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14004485826799334,0.06595604526415856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052469666849588086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947507164452096,0.09813573945076944,0.0,0.0,0.06188260705777001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3953375747066673,0.0,0.0,0.09636192060922484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10147734445553296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531403892159255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06162676379801399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093040540325431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06400560520249242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954052679200336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492410488332677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7705097474255987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107526842618274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420626537741791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133574117106641,0.11831455430209226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054454890087356066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330774831837068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18817140567623936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thrownaway_girl,2020/03/14,"I started a hobby, something that has been difficult to do given my struggle with depression and anxiety and other mental health issues. And it feels so good to finally have something to let out my feelings and express my emotions through creativity. 

I started doing digital art, and it has been immensely helpful for me so far. This week, I started an instagram page to keep all of my digital art and it was (and still is) scary and hard, but I am so proud of myself for finding this little sliver of hope. 

For those who have practiced this outlet, what resources have you used to help you get started?",8.089047619047621,7.813524571428572,8.020357142857144,70.80797619047621,62.214285714285715,10.680952380952384,40.095238095238095,10.125756701596842,4.2737452380952385,480,24,79,9,6,155,74,112,0.084,0.7659999999999999,0.15,0.9034,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,1,4,6,0,1,2,0,13,1,0,1,1,18,24,12,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,10,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,3,12,3,14,19,2,10,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,1,7,66,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14014956231662976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577922151064486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206078376538762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18526557719622666,0.0,0.0,0.2006896004875486,0.16744394672972102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571584815211782,0.0,0.0,0.1536617308639155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16411363249017866,0.0,0.0,0.19473590074403188,0.0,0.0,0.2455938130843593,0.0,0.0,0.18196161604274555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19121601887634385,0.0,0.1628389753990956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18733717079280734,0.0,0.0,0.18361723220238674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846252295788063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820767743751489,0.0,0.0,0.5186872495733723,0.0,0.1463059110608093,0.0,0.0,0.19152323723902964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15822830940379146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695415350369445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oof653,2020/03/14,"I don't know what's wrong with me I don't really know how to start this but in the last few months my mental health is getting worse everyday. Currently I'm at a point where I did something I swore to myself to never do again. And still, I did it and hate myself for it.  
I feel lonely and ugly and hate just everything about myself. Everytime I look into the mirror I feel like I got even uglier. And in those moments I just want to disappear and never come back again. Sometimes I start to cry out of seemingly nowhere and in the next moment I stop. 

The last time I felt like this was like 3-4 years ago. 

And I feel like I shouldn't even feel this way since I have a good life, a few friends and my parants who love me. There are people out there who have it so much worse than me and I'm here complaining about my life.",2.254525185796865,3.658862317919081,3.2801527663088343,93.55492774566477,76.10982658959537,6.792568125516103,20.44962840627581,7.447530270364453,0.3380507018992573,643,14,148,8,14,206,98,173,0.21100000000000002,0.638,0.151,-0.9309,1,2,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,16,12,2,0,7,0,11,4,0,1,2,32,31,13,0,2,3,0,5,4,1,1,3,0,0,0,10,15,0,1,8,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,5,6,25,7,18,25,3,32,0,1,1,1,5,9,0,1,24,101,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224928239958198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625587336101007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903429637336115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15178993098688712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18254001558725744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419192908829138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.279482314988482,0.19743903966796025,0.13267944263443582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676152688607828,0.0,0.07219605289736669,0.0,0.0,0.11590317239963467,0.1105193114896334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.272858512348496,0.0,0.1468843839610421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15188592157937386,0.2252787292191469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19520855778143748,0.27004119477117106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604074793967856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12471751959380405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13925815941866101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029809190051136,0.0,0.10158200671117693,0.0,0.21315385852811108,0.0,0.1469615060577758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580020431738906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062966000949752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852496441111288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579859752973066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430820843529965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10638170228373107,0.13666867589543624,0.0,0.1956163625477954,0.0,0.11035486283689064,0.11552899757125812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805768894128204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150519911413211,0.10968496348362893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816450067684394,0.0,0.1510838010927158,0.0,0.08898672500853763
mentalhealth,bonschives,2020/03/14,"I'm not sure how to convince my boyfriend to get help I think my boyfriend is mentally ill and he would benefit from getting professionalm For the past year or so he has been showing a lot of symptoms of depression, he is convinced that he is useless and unworthy of love and he beats himself up over the smallest things and I try talking to him about it and comfort him but nothing works, he doesn't believe me. The things he used to love doing have become a chore to him and instead of making him happy it just frustrates him and makes him feel worse because he can't do them as well as he used to. Whenever I suggest him to talking to someone and maybe getting some professional help he always shuts me down because he thinks that he cant be helped and he will be stuck like this forever. It breaks my heart and worries me a lot, he means the world to me and seeing him struggle so much but knowing there is nothing I can really do to help is difficult. I just want him to be happy again.",6.289776153494749,5.87629328140704,6.408168113293744,81.34106898127003,65.93467336683419,9.246413887619918,35.67884878940156,8.575989854853784,2.8070361809045226,789,35,158,10,11,252,112,199,0.128,0.693,0.179,0.9164,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,2,10,16,1,1,7,0,20,5,1,5,1,33,38,19,0,2,6,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,8,11,0,0,5,1,0,0,4,5,1,0,2,2,23,11,23,31,4,9,0,2,1,2,34,5,0,4,4,109,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102091170708765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16148073765930976,0.14628076058509354,0.0,0.14922593819133267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407910138926805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697076452932649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207599176015224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819912488658051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695403971060934,0.3551141161752102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279112662159823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647084423534398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22520872517049464,0.23908282390583566,0.0,0.17682297821130946,0.0,0.1330639563444078,0.14427701876077434,0.0,0.0,0.13347857668345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973660841781858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541789405303759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643863446857753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848509437427263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554560384730972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222456385779013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846563206336024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483267840217263,0.13766639751048645,0.0,0.21291679194740815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175987959715248,0.1697373881744691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992494283378355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287887693185684,0.0,0.0,0.07812251731224376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908857192668468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642527084669766,0.13450953453025907,0.13497799622796927,0.09408877093607823,0.0,0.0,0.0852935400514098
mentalhealth,Belle_of_the_Balls,2020/03/14,Help.. So I dont know where to turn but I need some advice.  I have this roommate that has been having some major ups and downs.  She gets stress easy then refuses to go to work.  Shes called it the past few days which has me a little worried but then today she texted me that she was suicidal so I was trying to give her some pointers to get through it.  Well I guess that's not what she wanted.  I told her she could take one of my xanax if it would help calm her down.  So I get the text that she has taken more than one on top of some other pills she has.  I'm not home nor can I make it home.  So I dont dont if she is exaggerating or serious. But it has me concerned for her safety.  She has been closed off and not really talking to me lately.  I have some ideas of how to help but I dont want to over step.  I feel like I should hid all the pills in a safe place that only i know.  And possible have her get involuntary committed since she refuses to get help.. but I'm just at a loss.  How do I help?,0.04302615193026327,1.8198606438356184,2.1397613117476157,97.45168430884188,84.11415525114155,5.625653798256539,16.347239518472396,6.782984794422108,-0.4680429223744289,767,14,193,9,22,257,117,219,0.094,0.752,0.154,0.9438,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,3,9,7,0,1,6,0,25,3,0,3,2,40,46,20,1,8,12,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,2,0,14,4,0,3,4,0,0,2,8,3,1,2,6,1,36,4,23,37,9,21,0,1,0,0,27,13,0,9,7,139,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317590842425128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11826302195158114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247116648622904,0.0,0.0,0.07469296212464256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5429508503982338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058561008610832514,0.08274032868653193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30255035461296004,0.11110308014714138,0.06582197983248247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275864708599808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3881514747763213,0.0,0.2323495876086577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307443081967032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730097447261388,0.0,0.13064763237517013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05658277423716693,0.11607995914656302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730934552114242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587750302775612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15696240865970046,0.08808472954640441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056128765879476,0.0,0.0,0.1210050516772213,0.0,0.0,0.13056727679543562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741959104405797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958057611444115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266900959058078,0.0,0.0,0.12668598120275462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708064475333242,0.0930900384238782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097818240295209,0.11066896375443107,0.0,0.07863274950835894,0.125976613880374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366247926591567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413419848292817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431680832735011,0.11761869623597072,0.0,0.08227371097962492,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,25813187834,2020/03/14,"I over-think many things and am so worried about my future to the extent that I can't sleep at night easily. What should I do? Hi,

I'm 19 years old and going to start university in the fall. 

The issue I have it that I over-think a lot; I'm worried about finding the courses I'm interested in, choosing my major in college, and finding a job. I think the main problem is that I want to assure that I know the outcome of every single decision I make (and I want it to be how I like), and I want to be prepared for every little thing that's going to happen and take full control. 

These past weeks I couldn't sleep well or either slept but then woke up in the middle of the night worried about my future. I'm worried that I might have not taken full use of my opportunities and that I might not find the job I'll enjoy doing. As I said, I'll be in college and haven't even chosen my major yet, but everyday I search for job opportunities, planning about my future, imagining how my schedule will be in 10 years in an obsessive way: I actually write a schedule and want to have plans for every single hour. 

My biggest fear is not being in control of the things that will happen to me. I'm not a risk taker, and I don't start taking actions unless I know there is at least a slim chance that things will work for me. When I look at my peers, I see they are very relaxed and not so tensed. Most of my friends aren't really worried about their life in the next +10 years, take risks, and live in the moment while I feel that I don't enjoy little things in my life and should ALWAYS have something to be worried about. 

I don't know how I can change my attitude. Should I really care less? If so, how can I convince myself to care less?

Any help is appreciated! 

Thanks,",5.092691853600943,4.8082918622589546,6.039582841401025,82.54950413223143,68.3939393939394,8.45698543880362,27.47855175127902,7.793537801064563,1.4620584809130257,1378,37,291,14,21,458,161,363,0.083,0.736,0.18100000000000002,0.988,3,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,2,7,18,19,0,4,18,0,35,5,3,8,1,58,69,29,0,10,11,0,1,1,1,8,2,1,0,0,19,13,0,2,11,1,0,4,12,5,1,0,4,4,45,14,42,50,14,49,0,0,2,0,7,21,0,6,24,206,64,6,0.0,0.0,0.07959382804500631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786703995930357,0.0,0.0,0.055465710537092164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16631804954095966,0.0,0.08628295366019036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829599227379498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053871663767807464,0.0,0.206161309499121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917811726899106,0.04124075823503704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22364160993664048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301545511806163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270838809701652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442519745415808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05467003219224704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803232320021818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513069426591989,0.2428163986712913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13447485372558687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11522087094786375,0.03984761478563458,0.16349532375406695,0.0720217189017646,0.0,0.06849246874730347,0.0,0.0,0.06934203792096587,0.0,0.0,0.05444400811355925,0.08269218994276943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730511371121372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674329095113502,0.1530829037369445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558676173055252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786121589523487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804487926944399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450283139223096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758519372209806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649952372744948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16324402432895402,0.0,0.0,0.06279126555389881,0.0,0.0,0.11546157566332535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839759202794377,0.0,0.0,0.07509235173950557,0.0,0.0,0.27093452456092826,0.15678703920315645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07044433782913566,0.0,0.06729810629680448,0.19243213792346067,0.06474099888908719,0.06542500563783979,0.0,0.07333502966407922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05937891422749472,0.4969877736522446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575719027097397
mentalhealth,spectacularkay,2020/03/14,"would this make me mentally ill in any way? When I was 13 or 14 I used to do a lot of catfishing online.  Now I know what you’re thinking, that's a terrible thing to do and I agree. But I feel like there was a deeper reason for it. Growing up I guess you can say i always lived in a fantasy but my fantasies weren’t like normal fantasies. My fantasies revolved around me being a boy and living in a boy’s body because at the time I didn’t want to be a girl. As I got older I would talk in these deep voices and impersonate as a male. But I wouldn’t go as far as dressing up like one and I still believed I was a girl, so im sure im not transgender or anything of that nature. Anyways once I got a phone, I ended up going on these messaging apps and creating profiles of boys. I would talk to people and lie and say that I was a boy and create this fake life, but I still knew I was a girl; it was weird. But i enjoyed doing that. I enjoyed creating those fake realities, so to say. It got so bad to the point I started getting in relationships with these girls but eventually, I would stop talking to them for whatever reason. I wasn’t gay and im currently not gay...the real me isn’t interested in girls at all, but going online and pretending to be a guy and dating girls was like an outlet for me. I sound weird asf I know. This went on until I reached the age of 17 which I currently am now, I quit catfishing like two months ago I think. But there's no doubt i'm a little mentally ill right? I think I might need help….",1.7673148148148172,3.2023045586419774,3.912839506172842,88.3827777777778,77.48765432098764,7.145679012345679,23.419753086419753,7.921354282810032,1.072727160493827,1183,37,265,19,27,407,160,324,0.115,0.738,0.147,0.7364,3,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,1,1,12,16,0,1,18,0,25,5,1,4,2,52,47,30,0,8,12,0,1,5,0,6,3,5,0,12,17,13,0,1,9,5,0,5,8,7,0,2,15,6,40,9,35,23,2,42,0,0,0,1,23,19,0,6,22,174,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111363048834104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855262266038142,0.0,0.0,0.06989803785433267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458416020715895,0.09150137532218923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582205735533781,0.06265742131079466,0.0,0.0,0.11580467881537294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11417212873878145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103793070364556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05197171463847485,0.07343037378619563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0537014681499373,0.0,0.17524704068162705,0.0,0.24662217868132336,0.0,0.11323042093298985,0.10177434829196284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889532186044553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3330797125714143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297704864438815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726008259980472,0.2510803575506825,0.1030186237416519,0.18152392840124504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873850230090345,0.0,0.0,0.06861048570753002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20716832326751436,0.10903975461118848,0.0,0.0,0.08204284350024643,0.0,0.0,0.07621455277322026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070850426004596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946378737717274,0.06965048677731146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125890425368947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716603948431422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932561506256716,0.0,0.1169930262417098,0.0,0.21136235427658326,0.0,0.11035374978500438,0.0,0.08777872404485827,0.0,0.2452187745597771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275249436351237,0.0,0.16417014266003285,0.08593373923484109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687463455241314,0.0,0.0,0.24784659762957995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828648356047265,0.1975834492188137,0.0,0.0,0.05993537162724062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040703426122176,0.0,0.0,0.08877414432312193,0.0,0.0,0.06062587466525485,0.08158678122496052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528369698859876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920650399105641,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Some_random_redditoo,2020/03/14,"I want to help a friend but i dont know how My childhood friend has been acting really strangely after being rejected by a girl like he used to be energetic and funny but now he’s shy and weird he laughs at random times when everyone is quiet and i really wanna help but i dont know where to start can someone give me some advice?

Sorry for my bad english",1.2712162162162173,3.5664857837837864,3.6445270270270282,85.4084121621622,83.05405405405406,6.402702702702705,18.70945945945946,7.645422480735847,0.7313297297297296,284,7,56,5,8,98,55,74,0.191,0.517,0.292,0.8677,0,1,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,2,0,14,14,8,0,2,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,1,7,4,8,11,1,9,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,2,7,36,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21764470708506295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18596642620249088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5220650774612555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21282368778918812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441542209343346,0.0,0.0,0.2136585221320067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985763143712501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24480813705400056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881239211038313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28536722027829153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887145293996008,0.0,0.0,0.24932287791819785,0.1576462018159458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987298613091186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19236325564418927,0.0,0.0,0.13136922598134798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mithranqueer,2020/03/14,"Do I need to seek professional help or am I overreacting? I'm a 20 year old student from England who has struggled with mental health for most of my life but I've accepted things I can pinpoint down to minor depression or anxiety as just being a part of my life. However there's something I've never been able to explain away which I can only describe as some sort of paranoia. Since my childhood I've been worried about being watched in my room or being followed home at night by some sort of demonic or ghostly presence. When it gets really bad I start to see figures or faces out of the corner of my eye and need to be somewhere where my back isn't exposed or I'll hyperventilate and freak out. My family has an extensive history of mental illness, with my mum suffering from severe bipolar from a young age. It's been on and off for as long as I can remember so have never taken it seriously enough to seek any professional help, especially with how difficult it can be to be recognised by medical professionals at my age. I just wondered if anyone had any thoughts of what this might be and if there was any advice that might help me?",10.284673642252118,7.1309365605381165,10.212346786248133,65.97703537618337,60.076233183856495,13.498555057299454,42.71499750871948,11.645159339076185,4.8515664175386135,915,40,169,20,9,305,136,223,0.16,0.779,0.061,-0.9798,2,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,10,8,0,1,5,0,24,8,2,1,2,38,35,20,1,4,11,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,2,0,10,9,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,7,3,17,1,39,19,5,26,1,2,3,0,6,12,0,16,13,124,27,4,0.14234783597819525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910065784594988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29040422934138393,0.0,0.10889570490015862,0.0,0.0,0.0995329166679959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13374047770573447,0.1094566992596962,0.11885449716871202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260398254369224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708336654056545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419287112726844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437086910834145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130909315991808,0.0,0.0,0.2862382616777433,0.0,0.14278648581924674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20108897255407887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259733554155361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14340046899615136,0.2869062761953719,0.3020171178617521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21109823338990275,0.21957485314422626,0.0,0.0,0.13358380115867308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14937010837572268,0.0,0.0,0.1082619437005724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541488346690343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119166875228987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16125234911107236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11343279543816925,0.0,0.0,0.1608125369547424,0.0,0.11775160090311194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10958631862205984,0.0,0.0,0.10075453096565752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14881286519315606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456957706566448,0.0,0.0,0.11300828135911188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15437015596620826,0.0,0.14456113716424726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166733931282987
mentalhealth,StrawberrySenshi,2020/03/14,"Tired of dealing with the Toxicity I’ve been dealing with my toxic family (more specifically my mother) and emotionally absent father for so long. I strive to be in control of my emotions and try to make myself better and re-educate myself, as they are like a powder led  and have zero capacity for anything. (For years they denied my mental health) 

I feel like I’m breaking. I don’t want to be like them. I’ve made great strides and I’m trying not to fall back into my depressive state/self injury. 

Anyway...thanks for reading 💕 I hope whoever read this has a better day than me.",4.7642699115044245,5.988163867256638,6.313440265486728,74.95653207964604,69.61946902654867,8.481858407079647,27.39933628318584,8.841846274778883,2.2053725663716817,459,15,82,8,8,157,80,113,0.094,0.7240000000000001,0.182,0.8555,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,3,3,2,8,0,0,3,0,7,2,0,4,0,16,14,7,0,2,1,2,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,0,1,1,2,0,2,2,1,0,1,2,1,15,7,16,10,1,9,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,1,7,52,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13664925942346756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768617886849787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937246142292099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18624499765254052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709184985896897,0.34239118596990586,0.14302307808425252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3735794407765407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654203956013973,0.0,0.08396248539823291,0.11862984951906835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830764156138496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650888492269276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649302559195444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433785108066344,0.0,0.0,0.14695360358062415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571254207300701,0.11084311811639723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16734455884632246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33220022187219705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323176181953626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15288129404688533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908559948649142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254811260609753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794364399453914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693408775397936
mentalhealth,Glittering-Entrance,2020/03/14,"I’m struggling with the fact that I have too many cats (serious post) I suffer from bipolar 2 and ADD and am considered high functioning. I have a good job and I’m a (single) mom. Lately I’ve been feeling extremely overwhelmed by my 4 cats. 2 of them are on medication for thyroid and one still needs to be fixed. I often think about how much less stressed I would be if I didn’t have 4 extra living things to look out for and feed in my life. I love them don’t get me wrong, but I just have no business having this many pets with my mental condition. It’s too much pressure. And trying to re-home pets is very hard bc of how many of them are in desperate need of food and shelter. My cats get fed and talked to and petted occasionally just to be clear. I’m not neglecting them. 

I see a lot of mental health related posts from people being really grateful for their pets and helping them with their anxiety or depression but I feel like my pets are contributing to it sometimes and I just don’t know what to do. 

I should also mention that if god forbid some kind of emergency happened, I honestly can’t afford to help them. I go through so much cat food and cat litter I can’t afford this shit. 

I guess I’m just venting and wondering if anyone is in the same boat. Thanks for reading.",2.8004388714733537,4.548808084291192,4.046779867641938,87.17961598746085,75.4367816091954,7.3508185301288735,24.507314524555913,8.150884317080207,1.3777954022988506,1014,33,210,17,22,332,151,261,0.138,0.725,0.13699999999999998,-0.0604,3,0,0,0,1,0,22.0,0,0,8,0,13,17,1,4,5,0,24,11,1,2,2,49,45,23,0,7,11,1,3,1,0,2,5,0,5,0,8,18,4,2,5,1,0,1,7,11,0,1,3,5,30,6,31,36,9,11,0,4,2,1,14,6,1,9,3,141,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765831467460892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342050415832497,0.0,0.0,0.0853882645233621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051806944227193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234938114594518,0.08724165441557602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953329375985755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276040059277661,0.0,0.06940289588708358,0.10242740776254627,0.0,0.0,0.1345275632278366,0.0,0.10798920115123596,0.0,0.1093944071823002,0.0,0.0,0.12980651330278425,0.0,0.0,0.1637072385903831,0.1290251567872537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118400921841745,0.0,0.0,0.12716787871919769,0.0671132674839955,0.0,0.13775526124714454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625607967690492,0.059661049384699814,0.0,0.10783308740773648,0.0,0.1025489877473429,0.0,0.0,0.10382098830994282,0.1102169334116362,0.0,0.0,0.3714277143898045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302178605155616,0.2461339406630741,0.0,0.0,0.14302399589565426,0.0,0.0,0.2693139818520505,0.1810990011800524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275082072978877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466176022791405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23391199815373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12215179008843564,0.0,0.07823239380918393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973128274217772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535313481885066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077855941718167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752418592478228,0.0,0.13988660753582666,0.12766502502863392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815441986551628,0.0,0.11243053140432893,0.0,0.0,0.0811302665758406,0.07824875958993502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291061042728796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076075230274256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324325675708209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674965128510266,0.1335176749733885,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,illrzn,2020/03/14,"My friend is unintentionally putting me in a lot of danger. This will be a long one, so buckle up, because I really need this advice. TLDR at the end.

#**BACKSTORY**

I am an 18 year old guy from the United States. I met my good friend, who we will call N, 2 years ago. N has been a good friend to me and is aware that I suffer from what I describe as a phobia.

In the past 2 years N has introduced me to many great people. I am not a part of a larger friend group, and it’s amazing. We hang out at least once a week.

Almost a year ago, N left for the coast guard. This month is my 19th birthday and I will be having a sleepover party with this friend group, and luckily enough, N will be able to attend, because he will be in our state the day of the party, which is good news (unless the Corona panic cancels his trip).

#**THE PROBLEM**

It is known in my friend group that I am made very uncomfortable seeing other people naked, performing any sexual acts, or even showing much of my own skin. All of my friends are okay with this and accept me.

My friends have never seen more than my hands, neck and head. I ALWAYS wear long sleeve and pants, even to the beach. I am so grateful my friend group is still loving of me despite my few odd quirks.

Recently, however, my friend N has been questioning whether I have a phobia or not - even going as far to say that it is a “choice” and I am not actually afraid. He will often bring this up in group chats or group Discord calls, challenging my statements on this phobia.

Now, here’s the problem. A few months ago I realized that I have been having dissociative episodes, likely for several years. I didn’t know what dissociation was, and after doing a lot of research, I believe that this is what happens to me sometimes. Overtime I learned more and more about dissociation and my also own mind, and this is what I have gathered.

There are certain factors that can set off my dissociation, and I have been avoiding them for a very long time. I didn’t know what dissociation was but I knew if I ran into one of these triggers, my mind would “destroy itself”. That is how I described it in my head until I learned what dissociation was.

Pretty much all the factors are very specific and relate to trauma in my childhood - so they’re very easy to avoid. Except one. Sex & nudity.

A few nights ago I woke up in the morning and my nose was in pain, but not enough for me to think anything was seriously wrong. I sent to my Snapchat streaks a photo of my ceiling with the caption “Why does my nose hurt so much lol”. I got a response from a friend of mine from my high school that I keep streaks with, we’ll call her H, and she said “Well I guess we can now come to the conclusion that you definitely just had a nose bleed last night”.

I was very confused and asked what she meant. She referenced the conversation we had the night before. Confused, I scrolled up in the chat. Turns out, I did text her the night before. I spent all day trying to piece together what happened. 

I opened Discord and saw I was no longer in the server with my friends. I texted 3 of them on Snapchat asking if the server was deleted, or if somebody kicked me out for some reason. They said that nobody kicked me out and they thought I left. However, N gave me some additional information. He said “I sent porn and you dipped”.

So, here is what I have pieced together, without any memory of that night.

While conversing on Discord, for some reason, N decided to send porn. I have no clue if it was brought up in conversation, but he sent it. I don’t even remember if it was a photo or video, but it was something that displayed pornographic material. After seeing this, I immediately left the server.

At some point, I banged my face on something, probably a wall, until my nose started to bleed. I also do not remember this. I am still finding blood stains in different spots of my bathroom.

While my nose was bleeding I guess I wasn’t aware of where the blood was coming from. I texted H, on Snapchat, and I’m very grateful that she saved the conversation. There were a ton of spelling errors, which obviously isn’t normal for me. I am typing this post from my phone right now.

From what I understand, I texted H in a dissociative panic explaining that there is blood on my hands, not knowing where it came from. She was very confused as much of it was misspelled and didn’t make much sense. Soon I told her that there is blood on my screen.

And then, I took a screenshot of the chat and sent it to her. I asked if she could see the blood. Yeah.... I tried to screenshot the physical blood that was on my screen. Do not remember this at all.

At some point I sent her snap photos asking if she could see the blood. She reminded me that she is colorblind but she definitely sees a liquid that looks like it is blood. I somehow managed to clean up most of it. However, like I said, I am still finding red stains in my bathroom, seeing that I do not remember this event at all so I don’t remember where I put my bloody hands.

After washing my hands the best I could, I went to bed, and did not remember anything the next morning. According to the Snapchat text time stamps, this all happened after 11:00 pm.

The last known dissociative episode I had that I know of was June 2019, and I ended up a few miles away from my house. I seemed to have left on foot and walked extremely far, and was on my way back when my parents found me. My parents didn’t know where I was and asked my friends, who didn’t know either. They started looking for me. By pure luck, they noticed a figure walking on the side of a narrow road (me) around 1:00 am. I believe my parents mentioned that they noticed I was gone around 6 or 7 PM, which means I had been walking for a very long time. The next morning, my legs felt extremely sore, I could barely walk. What’s scary is that I have no clue what triggered that dissociative episode. Even more scary, it’s possible that I’ve more dissociative episodes like this, but I am completely unaware of it because I do not remember when it happens at all. I only know it happens when there is some sort of evidence that something strange happened that I do not remember doing, such as incoherent text messages that I don’t remember sending.

Aside from these dissociative episodes that nobody knows about, I am more or less a well functioning member of society. I attend college. I have friends. I go on dates. I do come across as a little bit “weird” - but I am still loved by many, who do not know about my mental health problems, aside from me telling people I’m close with “I have a phobia of sex and nudity, please do not expose me to that, and everything will be fine”.

This morning my friend N disagreed with me on something while on a Discord call. It was something minor, and he joked “I’m gonna send hardcore porn if you don’t be quiet”. I kept telling him to chill, but he started counting down, and I could feel my heart racing rapidly. I left the call before he could do it, and thankfully, I did not have another dissociative episode.

I am worried that when I see N in person during the sleepover party, he will try and “disprove” my phobia in front of anybody. In that situation, I would not only became a danger to myself - but to everybody at the party.

When I got these dissociative episodes in the past, I at some point discovered self harming (by slitting my wrists) would decrease it. I didn’t know what dissociation was at the time, all I knew is that “cutting makes me not go insane”. Self harm wasn’t only used to prevent dissociation, however, it was also used for me to cope with emotional pain. I started self harm when I was 12 and quit when I was 15.

Ever since I quit self harm my dissociation has gotten worse, even though it has also gotten less frequent. It has likely gotten worse because I now have no way at all of controlling it. If I do find a way to control it, I wish it to be a Health way, opposed to injuring myself.

Overtime less things trigger my dissociation, so it’s less frequent. All of my triggers that I know of are pretty specific, and extremely easy to avoid, aside from sex and nudity.

If N is to keep trying to purposefully trigger what he knows as my phobia, I could very well end up dead. I fear for my life. I do not know how to explain this to him. I believe that the only way he could truly understand is if I gave him the FULL story, but it is extremely hard for me to open up to anyone, unless it is completely anonymous and behind a screen. Even if I did explain to him, I am worried he may not believe me and put these things to the test, which, again, could put me in a lot of danger. I just need to figure out what I can do.

#**TLDR**

I am an 18 year old guy from the United States. My good friend is visiting from the military. Nobody in our friend group knows this, but I have dissociative episodes which can be triggered by certain factors. One of the triggers is sex & nudity. The rest of the triggers are too specific to be considered much of a notable problem and are easy to avoid. I cover up the fact that I am unable to engage in sexual activity or even see anybody naked by telling close friends that I have a phobia.

My good friend in the military, we’ll call N, has been openly debating whether I have a phobia or not. The other night he sent porn in our Discord server despite knowing I would see it. Upon viewing it, I immediately left the group, banged my face on the wall until my nose bled, got blood on my hands, and then sent incoherent texts to an old friend from high school, asking why am I seeing blood. 

I did not remember any of this happening at all. The only reason I know it happened is because my nose hurt the next morning, my friend mentioned I must’ve had a nose bleed, and the texts between her and I that were saved on Snapchat. Also the fact that I asked my friends why I was no longer in the Discord server, and they all said I just left out of no where. N mentioned how he sent porn and everybody has confirmed that that did indeed happen.

This month is my 19th birthday party and N is coincidentally visiting our state during that time, and he will be attending the party, which is also a sleepover party. He’s one of my closest friends and I am glad he will be here for my party but I am worried he will try and “disprove” my “phobia” in front everybody at the party, which could not only make me a danger to myself, but possibly other people, and very much humiliate me in front of my family in friends. I am conflicted on how I can approach this in a way I can get him to understand it is not okay that he has been challenging my “phobia”.",4.044244312151002,5.369024531235096,4.8513201962865535,84.37771036965253,71.45112064854555,7.757821773039828,27.64443521466919,8.218090526680626,1.7377361201101418,8330,296,1677,123,155,2695,572,2097,0.10800000000000001,0.77,0.122,0.9759,10,4,5,0,0,0,261.0,10,3,8,9,73,91,6,11,106,4,200,57,34,23,20,309,327,128,1,34,66,3,9,5,24,19,12,7,2,7,132,82,0,13,61,7,1,44,43,34,3,5,95,43,272,57,229,192,58,261,0,3,19,11,165,118,0,45,92,1188,404,11,0.02448463195824628,0.0,0.023893468840626646,0.0,0.0,0.02392609897511704,0.086816595651316,0.0,0.024517822108425014,0.0,0.0,0.11748210798573405,0.02037317521223206,0.05305817699437733,0.0,0.049951168036239786,0.02567427146260929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017120223961254868,0.0,0.04029753175157863,0.043593026972524734,0.16022877989020748,0.0,0.023004117709569886,0.018827170629756758,0.0,0.07462802191804713,0.0,0.06250385525433552,0.11034318269790863,0.025695110658430942,0.0,0.026730876634325544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000928065201113,0.02800389617985425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06327402724365515,0.05134334153720823,0.0,0.054923193423374136,0.195489862860244,0.0,0.0,0.03158112410001075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02558122910810205,0.0,0.0,0.0214266664256844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027541915411662062,0.06505834947364658,0.05059833993510407,0.0,0.12937494790686402,0.02214775137786781,0.0,0.0,0.022005208425889197,0.0,0.02308193193379376,0.02755201808590658,0.01238016559896439,0.0,0.02350908638294779,0.0,0.06713553009998684,0.0,0.0,0.02684613516075858,0.4540023819404505,0.0,0.012792209632267112,0.0,0.041745541771308785,0.10268273810540976,0.05874779067211796,0.02699439317231062,0.0539451650476466,0.048487270214033235,0.19486511261044545,0.0,0.021933420962751585,0.0,0.050256592411303314,0.052052037637215436,0.0,0.029014406759428374,0.0,0.05173871592692799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028251977910202637,0.05242260982901161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04352613177074434,0.0,0.0,0.2152978143329275,0.0399164859325319,0.0,0.0,0.18621836984590567,0.0,0.017294219648701585,0.0598097720413378,0.024540033565775048,0.0,0.08667251518645412,0.04112184846558501,0.0,0.0,0.062447875536529036,0.04419667257234542,0.023167950772526324,0.049031045875237336,0.04964714758143117,0.0,0.026670942118349472,0.0,0.0,0.024674750167015855,0.0,0.04944499698769922,0.0,0.0586301988961727,0.0,0.12599315209020187,0.036310088706789166,0.018884057595880417,0.0,0.07811905157906487,0.13786301075014626,0.02398974073948252,0.0,0.055751831535022674,0.07707750744527965,0.02607533394359058,0.08295710141081658,0.11172999554410938,0.05210674939696605,0.05745488018867517,0.08156185868638705,0.026514470400814533,0.04674670339600076,0.0678982435887024,0.021379036209660172,0.0,0.02687677329317206,0.06943767399897105,0.05520548729873845,0.02344950923859585,0.049819346171234916,0.0263985744439458,0.09371394424906908,0.0,0.09845527127504976,0.02742839136450004,0.0520848399210304,0.0,0.0,0.015685482197285695,0.07552283868831393,0.02417562021075949,0.0,0.2773631501494713,0.020909741910586182,0.11645245958296625,0.019471162074364882,0.0,0.04955950942771827,0.1951108163473624,0.02228988935632256,0.10217124412905254,0.027660664839414074,0.0,0.020253940573066592,0.02752175218693331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424732946172973,0.024215927077123632,0.0,0.06932139408702319,0.0,0.0782138348397758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420194260603745,0.022542159493104327,0.0,0.0,0.032533003020214384,0.015688763512737222,0.02405602658371041,0.01943806281491796,0.07138592897523899,0.0,0.0,0.0233961151019555,0.027203327012056955,0.0831172894309829,0.026632248631512336,0.0,0.07646809609637427,0.0,0.04229372131636356,0.0,0.20202385603650605,0.0,0.11660856709588804,0.019640094866672567,0.0,0.06604387384965242,0.022697499126325047,0.06628071600430839,0.0,0.028156118398549732,0.023602311471620438,0.0,0.0,0.07459599679775254,0.04990386349216299,0.06957272017891299,0.02677010138442432,0.0,0.0946038013255132
mentalhealth,Pussy-fairy,2020/03/14,"How can I build my self-esteem? 

I have hit a low point regarding my self-esteem. I’ve always been insecure but it’s never had adverse affects on my life. My insecurities are starting to take a toll on my relationship and my health. 

When I get into these depressive states I start to throw all self-care out the window. I’ve been trying to eat healthier and exercise more often. It was going really well until this week. I’ve eaten fast food for five or six meals, I’ve given into my sugar cravings and I only went to the gym once. I barely even walked this week. I didn’t do yoga which was something I had been doing every day. 

It’s even worse with my relationship. I don’t feel good enough for him. He can’t say anything about me without me getting upset. Yesterday we were talking about having kids. We aren’t trying to have kids, it was hypothetical. And he said something about me “not having birthing hips”. It’s not a lie, I’m small, but I started crying because I thought he was insulting me. The other day he told me who his favorite porn star is and I can’t stop comparing myself to this person. Who by the way, looks nothing like me which also makes me feel bad. He’s also slept with a lot of people and I can’t help comparing myself to these girls because I know who a lot of them are. I almost want to break up because I don’t know what to do. I cried all last night and I’m just really sad. I’m tired of hating myself. I can’t think of a single thing about myself that I like and have nothing negative to say about. 

I don’t know how to build my self-esteem up. I can’t afford therapy so please don’t suggest that. I also live in a rural area and would have to drive at least an hour to the nearest therapist and I don’t have time for that. I need some things that I can do on my own to help myself. Thank you.",1.5722514619883048,3.5229982368421062,3.4940350877193005,88.81269005847956,79.78947368421053,6.116959064327485,20.292397660818715,7.1686216300943375,0.4705467836257306,1430,37,302,18,36,482,191,380,0.13699999999999998,0.769,0.09300000000000001,-0.9583,2,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,2,1,1,0,17,15,2,3,13,0,39,12,2,4,3,47,69,21,0,3,7,0,2,2,0,1,4,3,1,4,23,17,5,1,7,3,0,5,17,10,1,2,18,7,53,5,41,49,10,41,0,3,1,1,29,15,0,6,20,210,76,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627755599942962,0.0,0.0,0.2306666999317368,0.0800021922301102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912097274982298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027891563520795,0.17583136530399596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21122642080132434,0.12401401032349045,0.0,0.08281146280223868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838261292522678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934578375348804,0.0,0.12700866880572348,0.0,0.08100818268018442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722985030770127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626160442489693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004659120031568,0.0,0.05464268288648436,0.08064372948298072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492547788549584,0.0,0.10220000264173862,0.0,0.0,0.12889091456745894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468564786434852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851999887311352,0.07837281983437673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791162744109097,0.09394535373587352,0.0,0.08489975993909636,0.0,0.08073945252839072,0.0,0.0,0.16348186249782715,0.0,0.0,0.06417901834956266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129194802361505,0.07415466612995276,0.0,0.0,0.09022765615864764,0.0,0.18451170830158573,0.0,0.0,0.102393655229891,0.0,0.07312429610892163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665637878096731,0.08395204707770901,0.0,0.10554077904530376,0.09089020383270258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318874685923235,0.0,0.0,0.20645227210853415,0.0,0.0,0.09145802713788083,0.15292026255011104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4012100925875488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803766011387004,0.0,0.0,0.20416049919698512,0.0,0.0,0.08038338411870635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722907464788648,0.07727949633894775,0.0,0.08851944570556487,0.10995272950217,0.11163433714818714,0.1277518862098274,0.06160725862923708,0.0,0.07633015579065698,0.056064219277642685,0.11050708970219192,0.0,0.09187279245017413,0.0,0.1305553071120853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056710123568949576,0.07631719081014791,0.15424700652432027,0.0,0.08644790083528943,0.08912943953659115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926824925303649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798223493724616,0.06830022904803831,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoFondant2,2020/03/14,"This is for those who have not got the supporting ear you deserve Appreciate those that you do have in your life

I have recieved quality care when I was younger but at the moment I am not deemed ""mentally ill"" , but rather just upset to circumstance ( which I can agree with tbh, although I have been frustrated with unempathetic psychiatrists some of who even told me to be 'grateful' for not being schitzophrenic like a lot of other patients there 🙄) 

I have been turned away over and over again, I have to wait through long waiting lists,my friends have long gone .. my life is quite a mess right now and I am quite alone. 

However I am strong and I have not given up on this journey of life just yet",5.4519817578772845,6.477345873134329,5.098756218905475,85.02576285240467,67.88059701492537,8.642122719734662,29.81426202321725,8.841846274778883,2.116735655058043,553,20,112,9,9,169,89,134,0.129,0.7440000000000001,0.127,-0.0513,1,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,0,3,9,8,1,1,4,0,20,5,1,0,0,18,29,7,0,1,9,0,0,1,1,0,4,1,0,0,9,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,7,1,15,5,18,20,2,17,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,2,8,87,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164008102509148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19630780699493755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130302074882727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800416421271444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16142800514820355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16710993655197445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4427455609192557,0.10207846555591008,0.0,0.0,0.3698140393341422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17763494421361772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21056430655542047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4444708913276999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784352536845916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23710480895376784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19965295369512773,0.0,0.0,0.2272688042289567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BeanMartin,2020/03/14,"Nothing is real, please help aaaaa Good day, I'm a wee bit concerned about somethin'. Ya see, for the past month I keep thinking nothing is real, or becoming 100% convinced that I'm dreaming. It's not that *I'm* not real, just that reality isn't. I get this feeling every day and it's real scary.  The closest description I found was Derealization syndrome. It really sucks too 'cause then I keep thinking that nothing matters 'cause it's not real, so I'll just stare at a wall all class having an existential crisis. I wanted to see if anyone could help out, or if someone knows what I'm experiencing and maybe has tips to make things feel real.

Thank y'all a whole bunch :\]",2.8080035231943654,5.2313012977099245,4.193435114503822,82.94585437463303,78.00763358778626,6.168173810921902,25.344098649442163,7.321109707123232,1.3527623018203172,534,20,99,7,13,176,85,131,0.1,0.785,0.115,0.2491,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,0,0,5,4,1,0,6,0,7,0,0,3,1,33,26,8,0,4,9,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11,3,0,2,6,1,0,0,4,1,1,0,2,6,7,3,6,23,4,9,0,0,3,0,4,4,1,4,5,54,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543368973919351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914733049128665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777933857955047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216493184400385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613509785578909,0.0,0.0,0.13915009069779494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089534269400233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909688714652367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828718099694074,0.0,0.0,0.056363957309378016,0.0,0.0,0.09048640748326517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446222278063563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19178117803669908,0.0,0.0,0.059289194188811525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720121557309682,0.0,0.108382094266065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861104824113318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105474237708868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298569482164524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842217615704477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7367608555696858,0.06911205134684265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17193617114374374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140817388234987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932336569326104,0.0,0.0,0.07167208973623783,0.13825301840556697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06363167207897122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044653915892235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hannahmon_xanny,2020/03/14,"Mental Health + Relationship Issues I’m looking for some advice. 21/F who is diagnosed with C-PTSD, anxiety, depression, ADHD and borderline. I lost my best friend for 16 years to her mental illness not even a year ago. My boyfriend hasn’t really been there for me, he didn’t attend the funeral and the weekend after it happened he would not come be with me because it was a lot on him too. It’s her birthday in a week and I am trying to tell him that I am overwhelmed and anxious with a lot going on. His response is always that “he has a lot going on too”. He doesn’t seem to be there for me so I typically have given up and keep things to myself. Oh, and we live together. I need advice if anyone has been through a similar situation, or if they think maybe he’s reacting this way because he doesn’t know how to help. But he struggles with the same things I did with my best friend through his sister, so I personally feel like he should understand. I am at a loss. Any thoughts/opinions?",2.7742529411764707,4.556897590000002,4.3382352941176485,84.91382352941176,75.6,7.505882352941178,26.264705882352942,8.313332769828598,1.7439088235294125,778,29,158,14,17,260,121,200,0.098,0.794,0.107,0.5809,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,1,4,8,10,0,2,10,0,20,3,0,2,0,35,35,13,1,5,6,1,1,1,2,2,3,0,0,1,9,13,0,1,5,1,0,4,6,5,0,0,7,2,23,5,23,24,7,17,0,4,1,0,24,6,0,8,7,112,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588692474841701,0.258353232577255,0.11718034431352713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999443911472842,0.0,0.0,0.08989517922522844,0.0,0.10112661510879388,0.14933947619147314,0.0,0.09243180861695688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611661869611521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774549627559349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138718120714149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385688503388518,0.13417222599010845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731165295952928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668403111944941,0.0944380817361728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20426261836163506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025566395818596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689706108007547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051404911215545,0.0,0.0,0.08860559604450542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797423569441578,0.0,0.1174984360828127,0.0,0.0,0.07264933571804902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458239582916697,0.0,0.11672806975858455,0.0,0.11100809300008288,0.0,0.14430332196342904,0.3371550566856551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280475911150896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664371436110188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801878695647223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542506615675473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452552205449152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468566134446329,0.0,0.0,0.1419248725661341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203427473693946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485894890570972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819591282707422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554174534998575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17564515018639532,0.08470337711281503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974977671824455,0.0,0.0,0.13761666591276414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492795714683584,0.1060365503420724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939054940386864,0.0,0.0,0.17025479102660648
mentalhealth,stringbeanstilts,2020/03/14,"I am a female, 26 years old. I feel as though I've changed mentally in the past few years...and it's terrifying me. Some things I've noticed about myself that I can't get a grip on within the past 5 or 6 years...Is anyone else in a similar situation or does anyone have any advice on how to have more happy days than sad?

I want to be able to look back and think of the positives, and I used to be really good at it. I have a hard time doing that in any context, but sometimes it's harder than others. For example, I wish I could look back and think of all of the fond memories I have of my family, but recently there's a dark film that covers them. It sucks out the happiness seconds after I think of a fond memory. There's always a big BUT... Not sure if it's because I lost my first loved one ever this past year or because of family drama that I'm now realizing and understanding as an adult. My huge family lives 3 hours away, so it's a blessing and a curse. I miss them every day, but also feel like I have to make peace between everyone when I'm home. It's exhausting when there's so many people to care/worry about and there's so many things out of my control.

I feel like my own thoughts go on autopilot sometimes...I hate to say it, but I feel like I morph my thoughts into whatever it is that person wants to hear at the time. I absolutely HATE it about myself. And growing up, I was much stronger in my opinions and wasn't afraid to stand by them. After growing up and seeing the real world, I feel like I don't really know what my opinions are when it comes to some subjects in politics, religion, and other big issues. I get extremely overwhelmed when I try and learn about these things on my own time, especially with hostility coming from all ends of the spectrum politically these days. I used to be more religious and relied on that to help me with any struggles. Now, I want to rely on it, but find myself shying away from it because I don't want to be looked down on by people in social settings. I want to be friends with many different people who all have many different views and beliefs. It's so hard to be myself when I'm so afraid of being criticized. 

It's disheartening that I feel I can't be myself around the people I sometimes socialize with. I struggle with finding other friends and putting myself out there nowadays. It's a real fear of mine to be isolated or not included, and it's a vicious cycle. Growing up, I didn't struggle like this to make friends. It's scary for me now.

Even around family, I'm worried that the person I'm with in the moment isn't having a good time, they are bored, and it's because I can't come up with anything fun to do, or because they can tell I don't have any ideas or opinions. Even if we are just sitting and watching tv. I'm constantly looking at their face for a sign of emotion, really trying to read them. Any social interaction I have- this is happening in the background, all in my head. This happens at home, work, with family, friends, etc. This also happens around people who would never shun me or put me down and who genuinely love me. It's exhausting. But it's like my brain isn't wired to think any differently.

My sister told me this last week that me jumping around from task to task while cooking with her was making her nervous (in a very loving way). My fiance told me that I'm just a ball of stress sometimes. I have wondered if I have adhd/add. I used to be able to concentrate on anything I could put my mind to. In school, I always excelled, never struggled with keeping my grades up, was involved in multiple extracurricular activities and I did well in all areas. Now I really struggle sometimes to finish one simple task. 

I know when I'm relaxed, but I honestly don't know how to recognize when I am too stressed out. Am I really able to take on this task? Why did I tell my friend I would be there knowing damn well it will be a stretch for me to make it? Etc...

It feels like I can't recognize when my body is too tired, stressed out, or even really what it feels like to be free from anything dragging me down. I wake up with anxiety and it's a wild ride from sun up to sun down. My sleeping patterns vary- most of the time, I get little sleep.  

I've been to 3 counselors in the past couple years, and the 3rd I'm currently seeing now. I plan to stick with it, even when I'm feeling good, now that I have a better job with benefits that can pay for this service. I've only been to a couple of sessions, but I always wish there was more time at the end. 

I miss the old me!! The one who could enjoy the moment fully and tackle each day with confidence. But I also know, that maybe it was the old me that got me in the position I'm in now mentally. Growing up is a lonely road...thanks for letting me put this out there.",4.345331632653064,4.8863922755102065,5.4930994897959184,82.95301658163265,70.12244897959185,8.614795918367347,28.067602040816325,8.70634684264109,1.9380357142857148,3770,125,781,61,64,1255,353,980,0.11,0.718,0.172,0.997,5,2,0,0,0,0,116.0,1,0,7,7,56,63,6,13,42,0,67,14,7,10,9,147,145,66,0,15,25,1,12,8,5,3,3,2,2,3,65,52,1,2,28,7,2,14,16,28,2,5,17,22,105,36,142,108,18,137,2,7,8,3,38,63,2,18,64,540,170,10,0.12509074266961676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05011158795782841,0.04074574199696645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100035021718852,0.1040855187115858,0.0,0.0,0.17013198911936606,0.0,0.03189802525127921,0.0,0.0,0.05831090385282179,0.04272341613502592,0.10293902279506603,0.14847637567131675,0.0,0.0,0.0783512469823674,0.06412470648146522,0.0,0.1270902594685029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03687753216663251,0.0,0.04631587180554215,0.0,0.04654754627057399,0.0,0.0,0.042512783004216084,0.0,0.04410980643463047,0.10775459851855716,0.0,0.045059551175125744,0.0467666348619069,0.09987477929531832,0.09227368499998652,0.0,0.10756424069728003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306932018823493,0.0,0.0,0.036489250627273616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03483242140231744,0.04690341624988479,0.07386217940385366,0.0,0.09300616288074152,0.11016167436585364,0.037717246108280186,0.03513144860621479,0.03984318842227585,0.0,0.0,0.19654069899652352,0.04692062093330078,0.1897489141500927,0.17872970311497285,0.0,0.0,0.07622044839343357,0.03546737393738017,0.0,0.0,0.1610746624759038,0.0,0.06535475011486888,0.0,0.023697317258813088,0.10492018006118696,0.033348831389902765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061733062422033,0.08877428108314357,0.07470449007074374,0.08233414051320087,0.04279306355305356,0.0,0.046995452768972094,0.0,0.027948562670585247,0.0,0.08365080944890635,0.0,0.04106306130610431,0.0,0.0,0.04707074079215615,0.0,0.04352074525061115,0.041377753427119184,0.037062133219066436,0.0,0.0,0.11457766794280212,0.03398855030491926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042637919845598525,0.0,0.16296804877573612,0.04179126222406155,0.03681913918197216,0.0,0.1400596252451874,0.0,0.04551710746850323,0.0,0.11289927912799548,0.0,0.11133205610333996,0.16909650573142926,0.041890154783402696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840413646362018,0.0,0.042101996911339784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0306520296624972,0.0,0.06431846156432061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04747221320840623,0.13126169190392484,0.0,0.08476472460679801,0.03171238220166382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592176909209534,0.1445369509562369,0.0728162743494925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766766223723253,0.0,0.0,0.04170819800037076,0.09492043400453624,0.16027266577137114,0.0,0.04117067244220223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033159059781884416,0.0,0.04219950328589153,0.06645408423642317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04686907861910431,0.08345405447197322,0.12751425910299305,0.0,0.0,0.16495725741634512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432910230905434,0.21795334058394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03929884819266092,0.0,0.03135089025084842,0.0,0.0728898817939418,0.0383889164596254,0.0,0.0,0.08310473108216132,0.10687079594650634,0.04096700651750255,0.06620538460541918,0.1458828360075175,0.04792446903570119,0.0,0.0796863768445517,0.0,0.05661893540044505,0.0,0.0,0.04340795822701754,0.0,0.10803823840905014,0.0,0.034404321088266764,0.12296960169321172,0.03309706967877995,0.0334467494707616,0.0,0.0749810669694981,0.0,0.037624979546316314,0.0,0.09589878710244157,0.0,0.04521852480379,0.03035585016234525,0.08469048082009484,0.0,0.059240583042502924,0.0,0.0,0.08055433701813433
mentalhealth,sneakysapper222,2020/03/14,Did something really good still hate myself and feel shitty I have boarder line personality disorder just get that outta the way. I drive past an orphanage everyday to work and home. Saw a sign out front asking for easter candy. Said fuck it I've been feeling shitty and just because I do doesnt mean that orphans need to have a shitty easter. Went to the store filled a cart full of candy and went to the orphanage. The care takers were really happy I did that. I thought I was happy but I didnt feel anything. Like empty and still shitty. Idk I'm not looking for recognition for this. Just I thought o would feel better but I still just feel shitty empty and alone.,1.9072692307692307,4.6198440923076936,3.281826923076924,86.00504807692309,85.0,5.711538461538463,19.66346153846154,7.1686216300943375,0.7308846153846154,532,15,97,8,16,173,78,130,0.24100000000000002,0.659,0.1,-0.9593,0,1,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,7,8,2,0,8,0,11,1,0,0,0,25,31,8,0,2,7,0,5,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,5,7,0,0,8,0,1,5,3,2,0,0,12,8,10,6,9,18,1,13,0,0,2,1,3,2,1,0,6,60,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16034123233756553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273992218633534,0.0,0.14473074929584628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437354109101767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692092973205164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784379898666542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743094009992613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3913945582500182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431235998177328,0.08088423693592009,0.0,0.0,0.12985113841782872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296060334860647,0.0,0.1528473626816752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15529166310301987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563459186397925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300052700099438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16863848104578527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147930616582506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14778804999872416,0.0,0.13517813418894892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983563895480916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726413346010772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918383994476885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3709054102480828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24581099333008374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12288462067766558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870293639584689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127068700870366,0.0,0.0,0.10997584750787026,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Imnewhere524,2020/03/14,"I discharged myself from the psych ward because of a clinical negligence issue and now my hospital are refusing to treat me when I’m feeling suicidal because I don’t “engage” I have a physical disability as well as mental health issues, I was admitted to hospital in August after an overdose, I’ve had previous suicide attempts in the past 4 years and they decided to admit me for a more in depth assessment and for my own safety. There weren’t any beds in units in my area so I was sent to an out of area hospital for a month where  I started to recover, then a bed became available in my area and I was transferred hospital against my wishes to the new hospital. The out of area unit called the new unit 3 days before my transfer to make sure they had the equipment to manage my physical disability (a transfer board, and electric bed).

When I turned up at the new hospital none of the equipment was there, I ended up spending the first night sleeping in my wheelchair because I couldn’t get into bed, when I asked to go to the toilet they didn’t have an accessible toilet and I ended up sat in my own piss in my wheelchair, this was very upsetting for me when the transfer to the new hospital was stressful enough because of my autism.

The nurses were very difficult about getting things sorted and flat out told me that because they were a psych unit that they couldn’t get this equipment, when they indeed could and it turned up just as my discharge was finalised.

I was supposed to be discharged into intensive community care but I was told this wouldn’t happen because I didn’t engage, I’ve had nearly half a dozen suicide attempts in the last 6 months since I left hospital, I have flashbacks to what happened and my insomnia and mental health issues are the worst they’ve ever been but the hospital and local community services won’t even take me back on because I didn’t engage.

I feel so fucking angry with them, they way I’ve been treated has just made my mental health worse and they won’t fix it.

I’m trying to put in a complaint but really struggling to write it down... I don’t really want suggestions I just needed a space to vent",9.633560363247867,7.272302329326923,9.30794871794872,69.49260683760684,60.5625,12.321367521367526,40.41880341880342,10.746095033038511,4.293528739316238,1723,72,309,32,18,560,187,416,0.107,0.8340000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.9813,1,0,0,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,9,3,19,15,2,3,29,0,35,8,2,2,2,43,63,26,3,7,6,0,2,0,0,3,5,0,4,0,10,18,0,1,5,0,1,3,12,7,1,3,25,2,50,8,57,31,6,63,0,0,0,1,19,33,2,1,26,224,60,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06055428635293044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324592483499987,0.0,0.0,0.06847082418789385,0.0,0.37997100978256093,0.0,0.07577152843527511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909258511193244,0.0,0.09078826089164653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109592988583957,0.0,0.0,0.057427258679278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15773652863604895,0.09200824983282577,0.0,0.058813997378128986,0.08054714224315515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004859612882302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574242311657456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232152801328392,0.1395684705785704,0.0,0.05060685444921066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574860447794141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28395498089710497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788224501994747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258431827683075,0.0,0.0,0.09674866418948423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425741261579697,0.05943885015779288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692120627879668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215122458447185,0.0,0.0,0.06602642927556852,0.0,0.3440044587848109,0.0,0.0835635737725375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500441655668314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951575494820413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409020664371207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365971400389912,0.0,0.0891102385500826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06302716802664883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020018126978032,0.09309014065335716,0.0,0.2922053861551909,0.0,0.08392473581658197,0.0,0.06695145794141799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05915815960632469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701744054195593,0.0,0.060456341778814,0.1937128047158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469444368509948,0.05252159699428751,0.070680514998232,0.0,0.0,0.0800629856352348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239842568981536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907454107328259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05734265984916202
mentalhealth,bbraham,2020/03/14,"Antidepressants destroyed my life Hello I’m currently 22 years old and back in December 2018 I had a alot of stress from a new job as software developer and my living situation with loud roommates, from which I developed insomnia. I went to my local GP which suggested natural sleeping aids, I tried several of those without much results (i also did all the recommended sleep hygiene things) so he prescribed me Trazodone (50mg).

After 4 of those Trazodone pills I crashed and woke up one day with a severe adverse reaction. I developed short term memory problems, problems thinking, genital numbness, anhedonia, loss of libido and more.

At first I thought this was depression and went to a psychiatrist. She prescribed Mirtazapine, which I couldn’t tolerate at all and quit after 3 weeks. As symptoms didn’t get better I changed my psychiatrist and he prescribed Effexor, which further worsened my symptoms permanently until this day.

Because of my complete loss of libido I started googling, and came across PSSD (Post-SSRI-Sexual-Dysfunction).

Now more than 1 year later I suffer from many life disabling symptoms, I had to quit my job, move back in with my parents, lost many friends and my girlfriend because I am basically disabled and can only lie in bed all day.

To this day I tried many supplements and therapies to get relief from PSSD, but nothing worked. Including TMS, Ketamine Infusions, talk therapy and more.

Now I am in contact with many PSSD victims, suffering from the same symptoms. There is no research, and many suffer from this for years or even decades without any relief. 

A popular PSSD theory is that SSRI’s can lead to permanent epigenetic changes in the unlucky few. There is no official research and im stuck in a very hopeless situation.

Today I still suffer from these symptoms which make my life a living hell:

*  Short term memory loss
*  Long term memory loss
* Cognitive Dysfunction
* Anhedonia
* Genital Numbness
* Penis Shrinkage
* Thinned Hair
* Muscle weakness
* Chronic fatigue
* Brain Zaps
* Head Pressure
* Premature Ejaculation
* Blurry eyesight
* Less hungry feeling
* Less thirst
* Sexual Dysfunction (errections don’t work as they did)
* Complete loss of libido (I can look at porn and get no errection down there)
* Less muscle gain in the gym
* Coordination problems
* Complete loss of pleasure response (music, alcohol, dopaminergics, workouts)",4.97676402544824,8.519337734335844,5.294730576441103,70.76863143435514,80.17794486215539,8.38251397725082,35.241999228841344,8.896514948857734,4.4067103913630215,1912,110,262,53,52,605,225,399,0.233,0.713,0.054000000000000006,-0.9972,4,0,1,0,0,1,71.0,0,0,1,15,11,32,3,2,12,0,16,23,6,3,3,39,32,23,0,4,4,1,3,0,2,0,16,1,1,0,14,20,2,0,3,2,0,5,8,26,0,2,13,5,31,6,48,18,16,50,1,14,1,1,11,18,1,2,27,166,45,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272489303466966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06190261259004885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05263963775221433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904291500817475,0.0,0.0943735779010472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684604915687616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864121786838689,0.0,0.08853336219217152,0.0,0.0,0.16377337929624688,0.0,0.24348033341196734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996852923911048,0.0,0.06667081856261796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05112681039126093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039139471091193034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584263403078619,0.0,0.0,0.059804709938537585,0.0,0.12132640272674915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944225099818615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361319788360892,0.0,0.15362965866759962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16402525585967614,0.0,0.0,0.13670417836783574,0.06850304980623563,0.06500266035899471,0.0,0.08449924300795293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051669992814025616,0.39239440740723336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227173985373334,0.05690329300759285,0.0,0.0,0.07476048016666398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427441932906638,0.0,0.08122596988762126,0.0,0.0524532090709583,0.05887176138935769,0.0,0.0,0.08595167769718295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413482328729604,0.0,0.0,0.22220507769812906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16466444411285694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748964960429914,0.0,0.0,0.17401816082162302,0.15492646218140926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05478930548588957,0.0,0.06181759248638054,0.0,0.08866983320036656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4022792649493261,0.0,0.062217078465678324,0.0,0.0,0.17704405238221724,0.0,0.05142598946034658,0.0495994904958871,0.0,0.061452772301924384,0.0,0.0,0.07337309636342328,0.0,0.0,0.10510898972577264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638691527174209,0.0,0.0,0.0620914897395817,0.0,0.0,0.14351473795657324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492358046658272,0.0,0.11270691404790915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14954334485665646
mentalhealth,choklits,2020/03/14,Being Home So because of the pandemic my school is closed and I have to stay home. I have overly strict parents and so being at home is very detrimental to my mental health. My mom is extremely worried about the virus and insists that everyone must stay home.  However this means that I can no longer visit my friends homes etc. which is really breaking my heart because they’re all in our city and they’ll still be hanging out etc. but since I live at home and I’m not allowed to sleep over friends homes I have to be stuck in this hell. I often used school as an excuse to go out and stuff but now that that’s fine I have nothing. Any advice on how to cope for these next few weeks?,2.247880464858884,4.316928021582736,2.841870503597125,93.73194798007748,78.13669064748201,6.003541781959047,22.203099059214168,7.010146845296331,0.5120344216934138,541,16,116,6,13,168,89,139,0.086,0.8440000000000001,0.069,-0.5262,3,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,1,0,7,4,1,0,3,0,15,3,2,3,2,19,20,12,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,7,0,9,9,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,0,14,3,19,13,4,20,1,0,0,0,8,10,1,1,4,79,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490758046928457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300613701863683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088711574374426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394618686113803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025837864450711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16588681208958514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061013202739569374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411499494120303,0.0,0.12721803144962526,0.0,0.0,0.7538116273554055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947978025981244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694275817308372,0.0,0.0,0.10819015424945788,0.0,0.0,0.12573469660981298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11417491136962984,0.0,0.0,0.1030115074127653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920674660566573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877535646419478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21730112496457185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880644950515579,0.0,0.1074340839793567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288556011463745,0.08573508139373746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289756762341505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272159195187403,0.0,0.08858039898566977,0.0,0.0,0.086114950656713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902579013382517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theecupcakekid,2020/03/14,"New Relationship I do not want to set off red flags, as my therapist said I can do, and I want a new relationship I am in to go well. At what point do you bring up mental health, or talk about your (my) own mental health? I am dating someone knew and I want to be honest so he can make an educated decision if he would like to continue, but I also want him to see me as the person I actually am without watching for strange behavior. Plus, with all this virus stuff, I do not know about all yall, but I am freaking out and have had a few meltdowns. I called my psychiatrist and apparently her nurse said I am not the only one who has called upset. Point is, I do not want to tell too soon or too late. I do not want him to feel tricked, as one person thought before (until he actually got to know me), but not too soon and scare him off. Any thoughts?",4.82305084745763,4.25314941242938,6.113000000000002,82.76102542372885,69.0,9.565875706214689,28.99943502824859,9.120678840339163,1.981332655367232,654,20,150,11,10,222,101,177,0.12,0.8370000000000001,0.042,-0.8923,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,3,0,0,10,7,1,2,5,0,19,2,0,1,2,38,38,18,0,8,13,0,1,1,0,1,2,2,0,2,4,8,0,0,7,0,0,2,7,4,1,2,7,6,26,3,24,29,4,19,0,0,3,0,21,8,0,3,9,109,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.2375851446640803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734879088859442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08278172557801619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358470475562373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24860333788553385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155120159434505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918292642348065,0.0,0.09735995527082976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25879019439551665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338011097963061,0.0,0.13731865193080828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05947195628039342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125685032034262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245353829830376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351384552594936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16497709119648046,0.09258243794474534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125828377842817,0.0,0.0,0.2301515940363296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613885628734009,0.0,0.0,0.23158943258555645,0.0,0.12187466092967915,0.0,0.09700439864260234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10314286842019654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935366439961236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784332369565037,0.10639886519836064,0.0,0.0,0.1413398780089431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19328273331410686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4308030388428344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945141136969108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734500801861288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647470203382109,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ALF97th,2020/03/14,"HELP - Vision is heightened after coming off smoking weed/dealing with past issues I am a 23 year old man, who has been off Pot for the guts of 2 months... from 16-22 I smoked nearly everyday and got to the point of sucking 5 bongs/ gravity bongs daily because I didn't want to use tobacco... should mention that my tolerance went up quite quickly so I was always adding kief or using 2 types of weed. Now that I am in routine and trying to stay off it my VISION is extremely heightened when I am outside... it's hard to describe, it feels like I am stuck inside my head and when it is too bright or too many things moving at once it becomes much more prominent. Indoors is usually okay but can be somewhat thought induced. I am hoping some people have similar experiences to share and help me?? Surely it's a normal part of life to kick smoking in the head but I don't hear of many people experiencing my symptoms... 

Note: I have ADHD, some past issues in working through albeit not letting them control me and some ongoing personal issues (flat feet and broken nose)
May not factor in too much but I wonder is it a psychological effect im having from only dealing with things now or an after effect from years of smoking??

Any advice would be Fantatsic",5.92431129476584,6.4435065000000025,6.6466280991735545,76.14479063360885,66.64462809917356,8.767382920110192,31.83581267217631,8.648137234880735,2.600344573002755,991,38,176,14,15,327,152,242,0.033,0.845,0.121,0.9585,0,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,5,9,7,1,0,7,1,25,7,5,6,1,37,38,15,0,5,8,0,2,1,0,3,2,1,0,2,12,9,0,1,6,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,7,6,18,6,31,25,8,30,0,0,1,0,10,11,1,10,16,124,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414776875511012,0.11503553549601807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795324857306173,0.0,0.0,0.08005427280723013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176158949504748,0.13001352414277387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014061620120823,0.0,0.0,0.13203403892084575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427302303111732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151536635715848,0.0,0.0,0.059523241991407135,0.0840998596794317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415218594839914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054548352547461,0.0,0.2416312841576011,0.0,0.13268004974750544,0.0,0.15781172292281045,0.0,0.0,0.11692345085118655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715881110670774,0.3686102146915797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203776321520883,0.08314977800364183,0.05751250265933841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387011026669815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396372741016076,0.1251187239847444,0.17307686513735418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534152204448582,0.0,0.0,0.1235283187742294,0.1253689540680238,0.0,0.08953207598218216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748030107720895,0.22475590623549066,0.16322574813780832,0.10278937997058037,0.0,0.0,0.11128433460014824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521070521716346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125474853730157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095058832297236,0.12235712628774945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641711704093736,0.0,0.0,0.0934572730491844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992478764394034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20334618212551456,0.12965297871265846,0.0,0.06943485766715861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912848639189547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766333266261864,0.08570224292693591,0.0,0.0,0.08362557483795506,0.0,0.0,0.15161684536423792
mentalhealth,BigBoyMitch,2020/03/14,"Social Anxiety Stemmed from Bullying Whenever i am in social situations with new people i can't help but fearing that they are out to get me.  
When i'm taking things slow to see if they are nice people i'm still scared they will do something when i open up.   


I remain with anxiety and discomfort and overthink instead of being in the moment.  
I want to be the old confident self that i was before i was bullied.  
What are some good practices to get rid of it? I even have it on Voice chat with new people.  


There's gotta be a way.  


Thanks for trying to help in advance",2.5866086956521737,4.429985095652178,4.081086956521741,86.2859782608696,76.30434782608695,7.034782608695654,24.54347826086957,7.908726449838941,1.3582347826086956,446,15,90,7,10,148,78,115,0.179,0.6609999999999999,0.161,-0.1076,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,3,1,6,6,0,3,3,0,13,0,0,0,0,11,22,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,6,7,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,2,12,3,18,15,1,17,0,0,1,0,9,7,0,2,8,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784707248679026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15487511395308148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021434348859444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20480921968710847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901829814926482,0.0,0.0,0.1526593906924165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439917971279981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3515682661738581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19098642316114006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3785435855597267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18222142008328174,0.0,0.14503654114926204,0.0,0.1898736847450404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045842367064601,0.0,0.3710677791041835,0.0,0.14011838947307045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14535155312692738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684710988586524,0.0,0.0,0.1675682006831525,0.0,0.0,0.12091780249768234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235712544742765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073528340719232,0.14446920948631015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sam_9109,2020/03/14,"How can I be the support my friend needs. First of all my location is southern California if you can recommend resources. 

I have a friend who is very much depressed, about 2 months ago he tried to overdose with pill. I try to be the best supportive friend, he doesn’t want to take anti depressants because he doesn’t want to become dependent of the pills. Please help.",4.1853333333333325,6.358517628571434,4.300000000000002,85.01333333333334,72.71428571428572,8.095238095238095,28.809523809523807,8.841846274778883,2.3416666666666663,294,12,56,6,6,91,51,70,0.098,0.568,0.33399999999999996,0.9540000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,2,2,8,0,0,4,0,9,2,0,2,1,8,15,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,6,6,8,13,3,3,0,2,0,0,9,0,0,2,3,34,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753506043685932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058587322377985,0.21847055576631774,0.0,0.0,0.20759409647297994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3407546499231866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16826089879269093,0.0,0.0,0.4584929382498318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259087868245736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15789363363944756,0.0,0.14541640635525913,0.146676933174958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171409005422777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4489550638196181,0.0,0.0,0.14873187343591693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686060991147599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321766587187306,0.2333522153809324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pickle2Chunk,2020/03/14,"Question? So I stress the little things; for example someone says we need to talk I analyze every interaction with them wondering why they need to talk; or if I can’t find something I freak out. May not seem like a big deal but, I hate worrying about everything. Any tips? Before I talk to my therapist",2.121305418719213,4.85735856896552,3.713842364532024,83.1939655172414,84.0,8.141871921182268,25.52709359605912,8.841846274778883,2.544854187192118,239,10,45,7,7,79,48,58,0.23800000000000002,0.762,0.0,-0.9195,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,2,0,2,4,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,14,7,4,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,10,1,7,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,6,1,27,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136051121045842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702406552509423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20625832193286744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856346622103308,0.0,0.17980560172392324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18285586686348188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19752285578653314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774169680857152,0.20051777816510988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29669145695944216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22411868672922625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590997887993756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18213174310850908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951450067595702,0.15401987980992626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291738835028405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4824142206276814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322909883471419,0.13291435533629772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18052762469067696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169620548177518,0.0,0.2031758092724323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eatgoodbegoodfeelgod,2020/03/14,"i was teased as a dog in school . anyone you know or yourself who went through similar bullying? please comment Hey guys i am keeping this short n sweet.i was bullied for 2 years as a dog. the bullies namecalled me saying ""pedigree"",""snoop dogg"",""gorilla(because i had long hair in my arms)""... they used to bark at me and tease me as if i was a dog like chich chi chi sound . one bully even told me to go to toilet and eat . i had no friends and one friend came up to me and said ""are u depressed""? ..idk why he said that but when i was bullied i was 14/15 aged ..now i am 21 .i asked him now but he said he was joking at that time...a teacher came to class and asked me if i was distressed. so its been 6 years the bullying ended but it has effected me in very bad way. i was paranoid after the bullying ended(i mean i felt like classmates were talking behind my back about the thing that i was depressed or something because the bullying started at grade 9 and ended in grade 10 ...when the end was near the classmates would form a group and stare at me ..1 bully even came up to me and asked he would not call me pedigree anymore and they had stopped teasing me at the end so i felt something was up about me as classmates stopped talking with me ... i still remember 1 bully had told me how  my friends stopped talking with me)... these things made me paranoid in middle school and high school. the bullying happened to me in grade 9 and 10(middle school) and after i left that school ..i changed the school . so in high school(11 and 12) i made sure there wouldnt be any friends of my middle school who will read in high school because i feared the rumour would spread about me and the bullying would continue in 11 and 12 but thankgod the bullying didnt happened there but i still felt paranoid about people talking behind my back. after completing high school i dropped out of 2 Universities back to back because i could never focus on the studies and i felt the rumour spread in 1 of the university but i am still not sure  if the middle school bullying rumour spread in the college(1st university) i studied in.so i am 21 now and on antidepressants and anxiety medication since 19. i have gained so much weight due to medication, the first time i was on medication i was 65 kg but now after 2 years i am 87kg . 1 year old clothes dont fit me anymore. thankyou for your time reading this ... do you know anyone who was teased as a dog ? please comment",2.604074534713277,4.938216597077247,3.264012792608717,89.8133940389997,78.2275574112735,6.080771110025319,26.266645937902545,7.211369081168443,1.2347163949717939,1926,77,388,24,47,604,198,479,0.19899999999999998,0.737,0.064,-0.9974,0,0,2,0,0,0,66.0,0,3,2,3,26,18,4,2,24,0,39,7,2,5,3,64,66,42,0,9,14,0,6,2,4,6,3,5,0,1,14,24,2,4,9,3,0,5,7,9,0,3,36,12,60,9,56,22,2,79,0,2,1,0,43,34,0,5,40,254,74,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0369393441711024,0.0,0.04155451796812243,0.0,0.10774134181129133,0.07596337023378491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152345113130359,0.0,0.0,0.16707437195208585,0.04535478550524728,0.13245144623353644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055466615343648565,0.18638222884639352,0.0,0.0,0.057463173021494375,0.0,0.056953303751418036,0.0,0.0,0.04336996076398313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357117253148532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366243114833381,0.0,0.0,0.05558274263376417,0.0,0.0,0.1924449703091906,0.0,0.0,0.07175546512320126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061124905704628765,0.0,0.0,0.20862220457015532,0.0,0.0,0.04620441597725164,0.0,0.0,0.16786945030826386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030871208736915637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05378516757768228,0.09606968491621726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229567512800795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048281956912893234,0.0,0.0,0.059705511219178636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05901864954299502,0.0,0.0,0.05307584605734801,0.0,0.0,0.048071336384837904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279746492069387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591702145721091,0.0,0.16416452892245545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03993132199676157,0.0,0.041894798278294176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056999519476826674,0.0,0.07361703938281425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037658527625171474,0.0,0.0,0.11925371332636958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866905079993372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06153377348244931,0.0,0.15501178002032406,0.0431973056218301,0.0,0.6047201994788085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0449339211311393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363611127575596,0.0,0.0,0.038447852201524836,0.0,0.1301396488763246,0.13624141965705253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023915857162947,0.0,0.0,0.1746408731444963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217535701735779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950229815538806,0.0,0.0,0.10380984253151232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04691488876241252,0.0,0.04481954502139912,0.0,0.04311654924794777,0.0,0.06614691383649479,0.0,0.05035502261582743,0.04901519377112348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15434898261502975,0.0,0.0,0.13992074717942035
mentalhealth,nightchief29,2020/03/14,Why do I like making myself cry? I imagine horrible situations like friends never talking to me again or my partner not allowing me to touch him. Or them telling me to go kill myself or not caring where I went as long as they never saw my face again. This happens when I'm about to sleep and I get this sick satisfaction from doing this. Any particular reason?,2.881,5.347857099999999,4.324285714285715,81.87071428571429,78.0,6.857142857142858,25.714285714285715,7.957251820313856,1.7414285714285715,287,11,53,5,7,95,50,70,0.213,0.6579999999999999,0.129,-0.8467,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,2,0,5,5,1,0,0,0,2,3,2,3,2,12,10,7,1,0,5,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,2,2,14,4,8,8,0,9,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,3,8,39,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16553807900830664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24818910781830775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673921139043849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880703823509509,0.0,0.12718007758661787,0.0,0.13834464865706236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21526087494001775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693148863453763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378513694606232,0.0,0.0,0.21542441694818806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16248879585891535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754903928616424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502825485211381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736211083990435,0.2436018752426229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19565665894583828,0.2127651197244163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22565841108692164,0.21965417094327236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,grayperegrine,2020/03/14,"Virtual Therapy Because of Covid-19 my therapist is moving to virtual therapy. 

But I don’t know how to get the privacy to do this. 

I live with two other people in a tiny apartment t with very thin walls. My local library doesn’t have study rooms or anything like that. Privacy is not something I have access to and I am discussing very sensitive stuff like CSA and rape and I can’t exactly do that in a coffee shop. 

Please can anyone help?",2.5711498708010367,5.1008492674418635,4.190155038759691,82.04076227390182,79.5813953488372,8.00826873385013,28.16020671834625,8.841846274778883,2.7272237726098187,351,16,64,9,9,117,61,86,0.055,0.826,0.11800000000000001,0.5106,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,3,0,11,1,0,1,1,11,13,6,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,0,1,1,1,1,4,1,0,1,0,1,7,2,9,13,0,8,0,0,0,1,2,7,0,1,2,43,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15927897823296888,0.0,0.18745519034178573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13886121005840965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901305054073034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268562862571686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12518971699913214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22257744759999765,0.0,0.2011464230814937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24210914969608954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579237936240913,0.0,0.0,0.2500495903572171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536707898008108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260769822246439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5210049654621891,0.2644865854336874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22252180163513052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3759080890647474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jackdddd123,2020/03/14,"Long but need sorting out need advice Long story short, married, straight but neve got to exp cock, My day yo day life is now full of distractions, as all I do is fantasise about sucking dick. This is not a joke but deadly serious. I missed out on the exp when I was single but now have become more and more addicted and depressed by the idea that I should remain faithful and not try. Had some pretty close calls/meets. But just never follow through as I feel so Hilary that my wife is in the dark. When I talk to her she shuts me down or jokes it off. When sat down seriously and told how I feel she says she’d rather not know what I Do if I do something with men, if it is that I have done, Doingnit or will do it. That’s weak permission in my eyes but still no morally right. A lot of people su I should do it and get over these feelings in order to get back to a normal way of thinking and concentrate in my wife but at the moment I know I’m distant and distracted by constantly fantasising about cock.

I am now obsessed with gangbang porn where the women is innocently doin something like selling a house or her car breaks down and then finds her self in a situation where slowly she’s convinced to do a little bit more and more until full in gangbang follows. These situation I find hot as I fantasise about being The women but as myself, I think it’s an excuse of being convinced and carried away that it’s not my fault or choice that makes it ok in my head.

What do I do? Go out and just suck a dick to get over it ? Or do I just accept I like the vids and have that as my naughty secret or do I try and put myself in dangerous situations where I feel like I might Get gangraped as this is how it starting to think.

Thanks in advance for any advice",4.108866574330563,4.725455033240998,4.9853912742382285,86.11064462142198,70.68975069252078,7.900323176361956,26.67601569713758,7.937092434478242,1.3879999076638967,1381,42,295,17,24,450,180,361,0.125,0.754,0.121,-0.1282,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,21,23,3,3,15,1,31,10,6,3,2,71,59,43,1,8,24,2,5,3,0,4,3,1,0,4,22,19,0,0,14,2,1,6,6,12,0,0,6,7,39,11,48,46,11,59,2,2,1,5,18,32,6,12,21,218,61,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12726053977159008,0.0,0.22814805256508802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793851498223175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967823592710746,0.08976353226150219,0.0,0.0,0.12892682340460207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12744654809422715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615120434949045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057139002741615,0.0,0.1005453902491442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194624612664696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361028995804532,0.08339692219507105,0.0,0.0,0.21339097061840626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439610166823549,0.0,0.06634431622349364,0.0,0.0933652274327738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980582061372315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346988020911396,0.0,0.131781841711534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283111830951357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245478165052281,0.17109537618043288,0.11700112236717188,0.0,0.20661710848969256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924560626802867,0.0,0.0,0.07792284096193168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12383948851951035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731179837451755,0.09003475596894707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437745528316985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093072372277857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876347687157406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735290837387842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969274350783512,0.0,0.09283393237371274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178213005198794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.393651771512644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17973966168505906,0.0,0.0,0.082627035640554,0.0,0.09322630342340936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382876300848003,0.0,0.10747572753736394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22440103041710105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111547187522108,0.0,0.15851349388706398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09266038146252004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reddituser024,2020/03/14,"Lost a lot of money this week can not sleep I took a extremely large loss in the stock market this week after my account dropped below a certain level. For the past 3 weeks I was only getting a few hours asleep as the market was collapsing.  

The day the money was lost, I felt relieved it was over.  However, now that I am out of the market, I have strong feelings of sadness.  My mind races to how many years I worked just to lose it so quickly.  I keep replaying how much effort it will take to make that money back.  I am back struggling with sleep and this consumes my mind during the day.  Historically, I am great sleeper.

While my family is very fortunate that the money lost should not impact us, I do not know how to shake this.",3.7735297805642634,5.190192848275864,4.606081504702196,85.51752351097181,72.24137931034483,7.2037617554858935,24.905956112852664,7.686295010490155,1.2128620689655172,573,17,114,7,11,185,90,145,0.142,0.758,0.1,-0.5401,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,8,9,12,0,2,12,0,13,3,3,4,1,20,24,7,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,1,3,0,5,2,3,8,0,0,9,2,15,4,15,13,3,23,0,6,0,0,1,5,0,1,15,82,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275210968598304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19082453058411844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394693492319125,0.0,0.0748054211590026,0.0,0.14205037031870488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729513966889415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631098497063172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14569599240953646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150028537603484,0.0,0.0,0.0813066854146857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655125765323487,0.4844982278451747,0.1257775213816149,0.0,0.0,0.09875441506938376,0.14999297685011515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987644869774487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875657437601208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125188149538934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123021244664666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961036245265558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15466420303461514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123620409033656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437230324554122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17795958073297127,0.0,0.0,0.12207009279617967,0.0,0.0,0.35601758870505856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770569884862946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527170893941313
mentalhealth,duhnugh,2020/03/14,"I feel like I have developed a fear of my own home Due to the recent lockdowns in relation to COVID19, me, my sister and cousin have to go back home from college. You see, my behavior is much more likeable when I'm away from home. And I don't know why I feel most comfortable when I'm away.

A little background, I am from the Philippines and among us three sisters and even all of us cousins, I'm the only one who is a little dark skinned. I was teased and laughed at because of it, having fair skin is a really big deal here. And I feel like I became an introvert because of this and I love being alone and independent. But among all of us, I am deemed as the 'smart one' or on their own words, the nerd.

To be honest, I didn't wanna go home. Just the thought of this house has become scary to me. I don't know how to handle this kind of situation in 2 weeks.

The sad thing is, this house doesn't feel like home anymore. I feel like I lost a little part of myself somehow.",3.8719780219780233,4.143890650246308,4.741379310344829,88.88193633952255,71.06896551724137,7.822508525956803,26.452823039029933,7.61054688173877,1.1495376278893517,754,22,171,8,13,245,113,203,0.087,0.757,0.155,0.9347,0,2,0,0,0,0,22.0,3,1,1,1,8,15,1,1,13,0,17,3,2,2,2,27,33,14,0,1,3,4,7,4,0,0,0,0,5,0,7,8,0,0,8,0,0,2,4,5,0,3,4,8,25,10,27,27,8,20,0,2,1,1,13,12,0,3,10,118,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045674158652593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001283547947292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897164808933512,0.0776344609723981,0.0,0.12309244695295468,0.11150591100560528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408861554173966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668523474397409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136116581118358,0.2552501121718054,0.2885124922450557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475941507266753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5063715576887455,0.0,0.0,0.23299593120976744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10513762568056656,0.11097345754288876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19730205901347406,0.30357492088254096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021324844149898,0.0,0.09112322078030526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421956157400107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683054089247434,0.0767870555193405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933329590599428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467960478106922,0.0,0.0996889697684742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045459062803287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11348685567609852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707545714000822,0.0,0.0,0.08015349510874795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3643388586577462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809865809582131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110357509457176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ancient__geek,2020/03/14,"Hacks for calming the body’s alarm system during COVID-19? I am HSP and currently in treatment for sleeping disorder/ depression. I sought treatment bc I had trouble fasting asleep would wake up in the middle of the night with a racing heartbeat and a sensation of heat. During the day, I was tired all the time and even when I slept it didn’t feel restorative. 

I am MUCH better now. I am on meds and I work on changing my behavior patterns that got me into this mass in the first place.

BUT since the corona virus reached Germany - where I live - the quality of my sleep is decreasing again. I have trouble to relax, to sleep in and I feel constantly tired during the day. I am basically back where I was 6 month ago - besides that the meds that stabilize my mood.

On a rational level, I am not scared of the virus - I am aware that it’s important to contain the epidemic but that I am not at risk as a young, physically healthy woman. But it feels like my body switched to a survival mode. It feels very restless and nervous. I am concerned that I will fall back into my sleeping disorder/depression. 

Usually I would try to go go for a run for at least some stress relief but I have a small bronchitis so sports is off the table. I tried autogenic training, it helped for a couple of hours but didn’t improve my sleep.

Do you have any advice how I can „calm“ my body down?? 

PS. Sorry for my bad English.",3.2214720194647204,5.255769291970808,4.107755474452554,85.94635340632604,75.05839416058393,7.340389294403892,27.84002433090024,8.212053250817874,1.9398885644768853,1102,45,215,19,24,354,154,274,0.11199999999999999,0.773,0.115,0.2107,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,0,4,10,16,0,6,21,0,23,13,11,1,1,26,31,15,0,2,7,0,4,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,12,9,0,1,4,2,0,4,4,10,0,1,7,4,32,5,32,21,4,44,0,1,0,0,3,21,0,1,19,148,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536027315118553,0.09557575851992743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332116996300894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16581356135641798,0.09002504000240366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953578624855403,0.0,0.35929051715616234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405906548332312,0.0,0.0,0.11651491388313714,0.0,0.0,0.11930057203264133,0.0,0.13906971901516774,0.0,0.1857300934483353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12357084647204412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121396944276051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180677477795843,0.0770264957658063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171147763797806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225529685788878,0.0,0.0862333537765634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226934773638731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618079690283053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052675314316296,0.0,0.0952068700011137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23952701143744154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606074586909505,0.0,0.07925996827151617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118159034329284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264875603731825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794644187245793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891896632788102,0.0,0.5394883946030263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069545302580817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350723121004464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287059987342143,0.2478460276218769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464051507459195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874829106614088,0.08896263731583902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849410780344289,0.0,0.0,0.15318420293974006,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eternal-harvest,2020/03/14,"How to convince somebody to get professional help? Hi all. I hope you guys might have some advice on this...

My partner (33F) is suffering extreme stress/anxiety from the coronavirus situation. Her working hours have been reduced; some of her colleagues have been made redundant. Every time we head to the supermarket, more and more essentials are unavailable. She gets angry and frustrated, and depressed about everybody's selfishness, which is honestly understandable but she can't seem to ""switch off"" the negative thoughts. I know she struggles with anxiety issues ordinarily but this situation is exacerbating everything. 

Also, her elderly aunt was recently hospitalised after breaking her hip. Aunt is in rehab at the moment, but my partner has been unable to visit due to concern over transmitting coronavirus. (Aunt is immunocompromaised thanks to a lifetime of smoking.)

I'm worried this constant stressing is taking a huge toll on my partner's mental health, as well as potentially her physical health.

I've tried to encourage her to see a medical professional. She thinks her concerns aren't important because everyone else is going through the same thing. She is also worried the doctor will just slap her with some pills and send her on her merry way. She is very anti-pills when it comes to mental health issues.

How can I convince her that she would greatly benefit from seeking professional help?

Also, what could she expect from a doctor in terms of treatments that don't involve medication? As a general rule of thumb, is a doctor likely to prescribe other therapies over medication? Like, I understand every situation is different but will they take the patient's preferences into consideration?

Thanks if you've read this far! Just wanted some insight from anybody who has been in a similar situation.",7.733390336590662,10.308655817589578,7.7329519543973975,62.40455279587404,64.11400651465799,11.110152008686214,38.198832790445174,11.038039088145766,5.2961770901194365,1484,78,203,46,24,477,181,307,0.094,0.767,0.139,0.9532,1,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,1,1,1,1,10,18,1,2,14,0,31,13,2,3,1,41,50,18,0,7,7,3,0,2,3,4,11,0,0,4,12,9,0,0,9,1,0,4,4,6,1,0,7,1,29,12,38,38,9,28,0,2,1,0,37,13,0,8,11,151,41,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953766709407553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198242572948612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14019009721899722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055855482244194704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892927291010875,0.0,0.09901714620455904,0.0,0.07315737629962463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891892636167422,0.0,0.0,0.09573159327480008,0.0,0.2813549377808802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654330486443094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15440081813064416,0.08755433000056445,0.08234919651641097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574353166746907,0.0,0.05207421437803897,0.0,0.0,0.10102001967736614,0.0,0.09072596964594297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403660089523444,0.2921883351550304,0.0,0.0,0.12283242260470198,0.0,0.0,0.09100712203983632,0.09023496770198257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912713235275188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035626588634432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952947095269054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670047991023343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27691623432143697,0.18467862800211807,0.09720266091683727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165263815612967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047144026591986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730155272647324,0.08341454638408824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4119741354780925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20991876769202472,0.09578931537287694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13778546845912648,0.0,0.0,0.16871721331373085,0.10478442318509876,0.0,0.060873467024940675,0.05871142161461666,0.0,0.0727422719050814,0.05342893173211076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622092903533754,0.0,0.0,0.19077563065380407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07560256599151527,0.05404447541987376,0.07272991634091852,0.0,0.0,0.08238443434375718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670616052092176,0.18610504327719446,0.0,0.06508979028180993,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,danthestrongman,2020/03/14,"Feeling empty all the time I’ve got a few friends but im always feeling sad and lonely, im probably just being soft but does anyone have a way too stop these feelings?",0.97757142857143,3.329222114285717,2.9939285714285724,89.18232142857146,85.0,4.642857142857143,23.035714285714285,5.985473137389443,0.5645714285714285,134,5,26,1,4,45,29,35,0.293,0.58,0.127,-0.8201,0,2,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,9,6,3,0,0,3,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,4,2,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,13,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309270028740085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19405526957480232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428681738472296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4209821749046155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21441881351951766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22196591161428345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5995595565366428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29922403420094634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320273164766683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182984197506162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202902151838572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lilbxtch56,2020/03/14,"Need advice to improve myself 2 days ago my partner packed their stuff and left mine whilst I'm in work and didn't say anything until they left mine. I'm heart broken by it. They said they couldn't be with me and needed to sort their head out. They've asked for space but I'm finding it so difficult right now.

I suffer with bpd and it's been affecting my relationships for far too long now but I want to better myself so me and my ex partner can fix things. 

I'm not sure how to give them space when all I want to do is cry and talk to them all the time 😭",1.1194214876033075,2.7935320165289284,2.4504132231404974,97.08652892561985,80.07438016528927,5.391735537190083,17.611570247933887,6.1124844417494595,-0.5361305785123966,438,8,105,3,11,141,79,121,0.142,0.789,0.069,-0.9012,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,7,2,7,4,0,0,1,0,7,2,2,2,3,24,18,13,0,5,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,2,5,9,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,2,19,2,14,13,2,17,0,1,0,0,16,8,0,1,9,64,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18412225629067824,0.1670233360170825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550539533578438,0.0,0.17614766026462794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664255198636366,0.0,0.0,0.23730892632344416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20697098670937486,0.12151558495886082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221285275319104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18075003843443688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933737129039206,0.0,0.0,0.22327910801661832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4094386809801096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674614477598873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794227118161453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20229301952186352,0.0,0.16091001140791075,0.17923096975661382,0.14983948271141045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21569630471159887,0.0,0.0,0.17758401845759197,0.0,0.0,0.1514451984652031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517815641870675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098694636680764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222704941351253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371723117455777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Monster_Crow,2020/03/14,Just deep in thought I love my family and friends but I don't know why I don't open up to them I keep my problems hidden away so people will think I'm okay when I'm not I don't get it I don't like this it hurts,-3.2348076923076903,-1.6954737115384582,-0.12038461538461398,107.50288461538463,103.42307692307692,3.3692307692307697,12.269230769230768,5.148860815047168,-1.6862769230769228,165,3,48,1,8,57,36,52,0.20199999999999999,0.662,0.136,-0.6559,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,0,10,13,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,9,4,4,11,0,6,0,1,0,1,3,5,0,0,2,27,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100258317473846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31107453180584194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2549407093355361,0.0,0.17240024073953794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532490013265503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29330021206067763,0.0,0.0,0.1813476526372934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16121091500086848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978186415949356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287656682657399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157450318129252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114370139525477,0.0,0.2619662126509578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29775443346677405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,noporn2435,2020/03/14,"Please remember this: learn from your mistakes but know when it's time to forgive yourself I love my ex my time with her was the happiest I've ever been and I've since had people tell me things along the lines of ""You used to be the happiest person I know.."" That's why I couldn't wrap my head round why I'd do something that would ruin that. After some time speaking with a therapist it links back to me being a bully during high school and that I never forgave myself so I didn't think I deserved to be happy so I destroyed the thing that made me the happiest. I've since finally forgiven myself but please don't get yourself where I am, learn from your mistakes but please forgive yourself for them",4.393191489361701,5.536809205673759,4.8891418439716325,85.12350000000002,70.41843971631205,7.625815602836879,27.575177304964534,7.908726449838941,1.6398249645390073,562,19,110,7,10,179,84,141,0.132,0.61,0.258,0.9744,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,1,0,6,8,1,0,7,0,12,2,1,2,2,26,19,8,0,4,3,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,10,5,0,0,9,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,5,2,21,4,12,9,1,11,0,1,1,1,12,2,0,1,9,75,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226911395285485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433038866980774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17478925273691612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336307179318339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16985368517931151,0.0,0.0,0.16375372362162174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685830053716539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17537907512748513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400836503549716,0.15097872838789342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230618551732563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061822620227252,0.13932089776886436,0.0,0.5254441052833347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807494159599391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614823811218934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26397796012168484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283643120444332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13946173242890106,0.0,0.0,0.18526047445777127,0.2120080224124139,0.10223906241808528,0.0,0.0,0.2791206754699473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780787791358504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28795463518325315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334624419561495,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,airyNU,2020/03/14,"Brain making up problems to solve in my sleep I've always loved solving problems and when I was in school, it was common for me to go to sleep not fully understanding something I was studying, have an epiphany in my dream, and wake up with everything making sense. My bachelor's degree involved a lot of math so this was perfect.

Now I'm working full-time in a job that involves a lot of programming and debugging. Life is better than its ever been. I have great work-life balance and I love my job. The problem is that whenever I don't have some ongoing thing I'm pondering, my brain makes up problems in my sleep. These dreams aren't like normal dreams because they are repetitive and as soon as I wake up, I realize that the problems I'm trying to solve don't actually make any sense. These dreams are restless and frustrating, where I just keep doing the same thing over and over. Kind of like when you keep dreaming you wake up and get ready, brush your teeth, etc only to realize it was a dream. If I am puzzling over something in my real life, I sleep like a rock. When life is good, I have these stupid restless dreams and wake up tired. This happens pretty much every night.

Has anyone else experienced this?

I just watched ""A Beautiful Mind"" and in the first scene of the movie he picks out all these random patterns on things. I've always done that with wallpaper or ceiling spackle but never thought anything of it. To me it's just random patterns, not solving codes or anything cool like that. However, he had this trait of finding patterns and an incessant need to solve problems and it turned out he had schizophrenia. Now I am wondering if I should be monitoring myself for something like that that might surface as I get older.",6.5553603603603605,6.965704378378379,6.2116081081081065,80.18389864864865,65.27627627627628,9.062402402402402,33.466816816816824,8.841846274778883,2.7186697897897893,1390,56,258,20,20,432,169,333,0.099,0.774,0.128,0.8375,3,0,3,0,0,0,34.0,0,3,1,4,12,23,2,2,13,1,28,17,11,5,4,63,48,24,0,11,10,0,0,5,0,2,4,0,0,0,24,16,0,2,7,8,0,1,6,10,0,1,10,4,29,13,40,35,7,35,0,0,1,2,11,21,0,12,18,174,53,6,0.0,0.0,0.08450358065815501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410684913881466,0.0,0.0,0.05888711799968654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060548773225245774,0.08872613058774624,0.14251952060238307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052787103551807775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658565327335719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19333583512561048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886160707497196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07233845627563718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657557493929628,0.0,0.07832953462890035,0.07295946295399906,0.0,0.07782540565875704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07914565441395102,0.07365709805664424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048393313391837,0.0,0.04921355677737935,0.07263122068685887,0.0,0.0954705612638233,0.0,0.0,0.0765750854380309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17186303372366848,0.1539380494042201,0.0,0.0901746755609208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18349242147532085,0.21152809286725988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14723881583234938,0.156309538411975,0.0,0.2312095670722573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186290622102074,0.08743559419860884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365680071132139,0.06420860299116055,0.06678689037790103,0.0,0.0,0.0812629183760629,0.08484406366731306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585889470029004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809757104751734,0.0,0.4971545090083303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856331240361056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763809119216087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3466274940072834,0.0,0.0,0.19999365165705535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17258828739610824,0.0,0.0,0.06874623018846786,0.0,0.09952745081458936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05879187001575674,0.09418977149581677,0.0,0.09014775780161187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390786364195032,0.12608341604023604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ambauh-,2020/03/14,"My friends ostracized me 5 years ago. It still hurts me deeply. Why can’t I let go? Around 5 years ago my closest friends, who I knew since middle school, suddenly hated me. They stopped inviting me to things. This hurt me so deeply because I was left with no one. Eventually they apologized and included me again. But it’s been 5 years and I still get deeply depressed over this when I occasionally see my two friends hanging out without me. I can be happy and productive one moment, then another i’ll see them without me and start crying and feel hopeless. Why can’t I let this go?",2.5351474926253665,5.096928761061951,3.2240929203539817,88.7195612094395,79.97345132743362,6.5985250737463135,27.11578171091445,7.793537801064563,1.7026525073746313,462,20,92,8,12,145,71,113,0.195,0.667,0.138,-0.8049,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,3,0,6,9,1,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,0,14,17,9,0,0,3,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,1,2,0,0,3,5,5,0,3,3,3,21,4,7,11,0,23,0,4,2,0,8,6,0,0,14,59,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544633538942813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15050489312912288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777312640068214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749523802123126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15766219467526893,0.0,0.0,0.12362314259872632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257364646574528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326753598141357,0.0,0.07498908572317596,0.0,0.1631440853685832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15279154527688904,0.0,0.1417072648132676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3073060632452801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15594698091408246,0.2935405877069117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945208018902493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14526115533235934,0.22875143783893997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873042496385565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159206487926672,0.0,0.22924827430688416,0.11999844250072092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953556978210196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020904751434465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590290203762444,0.0,0.0,0.2767177538657594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27728800462441805
mentalhealth,callaynejustine,2020/03/14,"Struggling with self love I don’t understand how anybody could be attracted to me. I feel uncomfortable every time I look in a mirror. The other day I took a selfie, and I can see the unhappiness seeping out of the photo. There’s no way I could post it. Why do I feel this way?

Everyone thinks it’s a simple fix, but it’s easier said than done. Stop eating so much? Try telling my stomach that’s a solution and we can talk. Exercise? I don’t know where to find the motivation. 
I hate my appearance and lost as to what to do about it.

I’m the centre of attention in my job as a teacher and that scares me, aren’t they distracted by my weight? My tiredness? My cellulite? My stretch marks? My sweat as I tire myself out just walking in the heat? 

My mind is forever counting calories, yet forever craving binge eating sessions. 
The comments I’ve had all my life probably haven’t helped, especially from my sister who had me believing I was overweight at 60-65kg (I’m 170cm). I wish I could be 65kg, I regret not appreciating my time at that weight and being thankful for the photos where I actually liked looking at myself. How do I get back to that point? 

Everyone says you need to accept yourself how you are, love yourself how you are and then you can start making progress. That doesn’t seem possible at this point.",2.286667645331768,4.5804780954198465,3.923206106870232,84.8832589547857,79.11450381679387,7.2368761009982405,25.72577803875513,8.263242389622931,1.8194035231943628,1039,41,206,21,26,346,153,262,0.125,0.7290000000000001,0.146,0.8705,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,1,4,1,3,12,12,1,3,13,0,24,12,2,6,1,38,48,16,0,6,3,1,4,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,14,10,5,1,10,1,0,3,7,6,0,0,7,9,39,6,26,35,2,28,0,2,3,2,17,14,0,2,9,139,53,3,0.0,0.0,0.11922403232482175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394413237856948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13764806680592204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.292637580808632,0.0,0.0,0.07879201186040805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502624387365144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25002865351235504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293671938965074,0.2334846565642193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354951668197092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116646654109259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383078258231302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062136140745648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189054158322323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212386725421864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714354073781283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862949878137196,0.05968796111406035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051904904816972,0.0,0.13336716545428884,0.0,0.2205332994786988,0.0,0.08155197887395857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12336073841941905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981182106830525,0.09059034539042347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23098751502997586,0.13773263409583086,0.1170087552423483,0.0,0.13172405035984985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621528793690583,0.09715753171045376,0.12231731520757458,0.0,0.09735672300359974,0.11122246446762496,0.1274539477080585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647526427159209,0.0,0.0,0.10214279077565087,0.0,0.1277226117898091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981986950703644,0.10678531068656964,0.11248124623526502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828405580853326,0.0,0.0,0.14248108318554406,0.1404208427702948,0.0,0.0,0.13573961824720612,0.08294800949974726,0.0,0.0,0.12718726362173816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939517958585747,0.0,0.2975496173247494,0.0,0.0,0.11024287683131216,0.0,0.14049387271815494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,c11thepalms,2020/03/14,"My dear old friend Hi all, I had some serious anxiety issues which I’ve been working on and have managed to put pen to paper and written a verse about it. Let me know what you think.
Check out my blog for more content 

I blinked
And there he was 
My dear old friend 
Each time I think he’s gone
There he is,
At my door step, again

I smiled, 
He loves me.
He really cares 
I want him, inside me 
He’s already there.

A love that cackles, when I fall,
A love that whispers, when I sleep,
A love that wants to see me crawl,
Relishing the tears I weep.
 
I cannot take it anymore,
Please leave.
Your voracious appetite,
I cannot appease.

Don’t you need me?, he said
To fan your flames. 
To cast your resplendence on the world
The faithful companion behind your name.

Who are you without me?

Happy? 
Calm? 
Content?

Happy? You burgeon in inadequacy.
Calm? You flourish in chaos.
Content? You thrive on the rat-race

I screamed,
He’s even bigger now. Stronger.
His arms engulf me in an embrace.
My fiercest ally lies between my ears.
Exhorting me to win the race.

His voice is louder now.
Crystal clear over the cacophony.
‘Run, faster, run’ he said
I’m out of breath, I cry in agony.

I shrieked,
What do you want from me?
The love has metastasised.
He’s now in my bones, 
I lay there, paralyzed.

The voice is enervating,
Crawling under my skin,
War ravaged the head and the heart,
Said he, ‘You need to win’

I thrashed, I shouted 
He’s even louder now.
I’m trying to fight. 
He’s draining every drop of light.

Gone is the sparkle in my eyes 
I have lost all pretense.
I have nothing more to give
There was only deathly silence.
[blog ](https://musingsbyamedstudent.wordpress.com/2020/03/13/my-dear-old-friend/)",1.098516811113161,3.6887663260188113,1.682640604831274,94.1395660458541,95.77115987460812,4.257446677730654,20.988444280533532,6.122218185202224,0.23502023480238465,1314,47,263,14,51,401,175,319,0.139,0.674,0.187,0.9697,0,0,0,0,1,1,78.0,0,12,0,4,15,23,2,0,16,0,18,14,9,0,3,21,44,6,2,5,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,9,1,0,9,7,0,0,3,2,1,7,4,6,0,0,11,13,51,17,31,32,6,35,1,2,2,5,44,16,0,1,11,149,60,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12376717213381155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579919744858919,0.0,0.11122882795240617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435073595728265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319833566799453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481562444026847,0.0,0.0944964483498459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259954840355154,0.0,0.0,0.10759046116119243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387847526926055,0.0,0.0,0.11510463360333648,0.0,0.0,0.1329056547220673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706194930412472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061638122595875276,0.0,0.0,0.11875723754874093,0.0,0.11468732859827802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243175745878332,0.0,0.5061268142985227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632482451236005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761691311048023,0.0,0.35306724263907474,0.0,0.0,0.08529985541899851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231138441314104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274797377510667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185014321839119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32005873178516353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937398239781938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223721282305713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432751562618193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373034773578125,0.0,0.0,0.06539919087137007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07614670782099411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984579243273461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081145889040288,0.0,0.08165106025472219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cadifanatic,2020/03/14,"Why am I quick to anger all the time any more? Background. I'm a 25 year old male and as far as life goes, on paper, mine is pretty great. I'm engaged to a great gal and we're getting married in 3 months, I have a high paying job, a brand new car, a brand new house, everything I could ever want. I work a high-stress job managing a department of 40 people that is mentally exhausting. At work, I am charming and quick to please. At home, I feel like I'm mentally drained and can't offer anything more to my family or to my fiancee. 

I am quick to anger all the time anymore. My parents call often and instead of being happy that they care enough to call to see how I'm doing, I'm annoyed that they're taking away from my time to decompress after work. I haven't been there emotionally for my fiancee and it's putting strain on our relationship currently. 

I don't know what I can do to make this better. I am not sure but I think my work is a factor. I am the breadwinner of the house and if I don't have this job, we lose our ability to pay for everything - house, cars, utilities, insurance, groceries, you name it. I am putting a lot in to work given the stakes involved but I think it might be putting strain on how I am toward my family and fiancee. 

A new job is out of the question as I was just promoted and relocated within my company and a) am contractually obligated to remain in my position for 2 years to avoid reimbursing the company the costs associated with my move and b) it is unlikely I'll find another high paying job with my skills in the area. 

I am so frustrated and uncompromising to everyone because I feel like I get no time to do anything I enjoy during the day, so I want to do it at night...but living with your fiancee and fielding calls from family makes that difficult and it brings me to an annoyed anger quickly.

How can I make myself better?",4.721743623570799,5.115835575197887,6.198301451187338,78.75052165787163,69.23746701846966,9.799516270888304,30.56739226033421,9.827888789773867,2.7782162708883025,1469,56,300,33,24,502,184,379,0.111,0.775,0.114,-0.22399999999999998,7,1,0,0,0,0,40.0,3,2,1,10,14,24,6,3,22,0,32,2,0,6,4,50,54,26,0,4,6,1,2,2,4,1,2,0,1,1,13,19,0,1,7,0,5,8,6,12,0,0,3,3,44,12,48,47,6,45,0,1,1,0,20,18,0,6,21,199,57,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05310918744641036,0.081892361035591,0.0,0.0,0.07745203991006419,0.0,0.0,0.1285356830416594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337546132597728,0.0,0.0,0.047607698806060715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381423290378099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392397811118902,0.0,0.07962592007980493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06235474471579128,0.0,0.0,0.050366625212216284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784952218754459,0.0,0.08069591240011736,0.0,0.0,0.07064393841142819,0.0,0.07462580223746153,0.14037854789381454,0.0,0.2208709882273408,0.0,0.07897719648148945,0.11158617910843993,0.0,0.0,0.07137998154132309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160576249840093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17220621779457387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313656871119808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475438656775381,0.07833846900976871,0.0,0.0,0.27034315404368503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3875001181577455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04292051277677682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05516279133228212,0.07630928811512767,0.0,0.06896179517629275,0.0,0.0,0.08737147037223597,0.0,0.06639596345561828,0.0,0.0,0.15639267959814146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15740844308537272,0.08284943246654007,0.0,0.0,0.06233692515334335,0.0830056102209866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262820485265201,0.0,0.07328950220487344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195051190481825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671837339840194,0.0,0.0,0.054143186552988734,0.0,0.0,0.08572794072079533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794535472828023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23552960303631945,0.08748741834868967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384781837452936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062233841523163635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894607750616998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360625967739806,0.0,0.058719832133719015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008384367659168,0.0,0.0,0.1821578392832713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212822106422032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047112427483669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28428067138556024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058485547514064
mentalhealth,Yomitai,2020/03/14,"Trisha Paytas meet my alters | dissociative identity disorder - The Harmful Effects of Misinformation Dear u/shanedawson ,

I don't know if you'll ever read this, but I hope you go watch u/DissociaDID 's reaction to Trisha's meet the alters video and have a serious discussion with Trisha about the effects of what her decision has on not only those with DID, but also on how the misinformation she’s spread to her following can cause a domino effect on other (and future) individuals with DID.

The “decision” I’m referring to is the decision to record and release a video with little to no research into what DID is. I am in no way trying to insinuate that she’s “faking” or that she’s wrong. I’m not requesting a public apology. I simply wish to inform Trisha of how hurtful her quick decision has been to not only u/DissociaDID , but the DID community as a whole.

While it seems that it was a combo video of her thoughts and ideas about DID and meeting her alters, the fact that she used extremely dated, as well as incorrect, information about a community that has already been dehumanized by the media, and even called one of the most open and devoted activists for said community crazy, shows that her reasoning for creating and publishing her video on such a sensitive disorder to her almost 5 million subscribers was thoughtless and shallow — deemed only for entertainment and fun.

I want to clarify that I am in no way calling Trisha herself thoughtless and shallow, but her decision to create and publish her video with the lack of information she had and shared on a mental disorder was observed to be as such.

I’m asking you u/shanedawson , because I know you are a true and long time friend of hers and I know that if no one else, you will be able to talk about it in a way to her that no one else can. I don’t hate Trisha, I don’t even dislike her, I just want to make sure she is aware of why she’s getting such backlash on her video and is better informed for the future.

Sincerely, a concerned supporter of the DID community.",11.326044905008635,7.878853849740933,11.198331606217618,60.60996718480139,58.4300518134715,14.542037996545773,43.608981001727116,12.573866699077325,5.403960483592401,1630,69,283,41,15,548,178,386,0.156,0.71,0.134,-0.8197,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,5,0,4,16,19,1,0,25,0,32,0,0,9,4,70,53,31,0,7,11,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,17,23,0,0,20,9,0,2,11,6,1,4,14,2,39,13,52,35,3,25,0,1,1,0,45,12,0,7,8,215,56,4,0.11917483410196175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11933638158399518,0.0,0.13151239290149572,0.09530407177465718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141238246527392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264787272773736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054004561230171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433816603266941,0.0,0.0,0.12242538284162464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4097540541128134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19911056342296735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15742770791943322,0.1078004603332393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207418120121774,0.0,0.0622639320583908,0.0,0.06772980460527449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766047583357575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836750044271348,0.0,0.0,0.12757912473869598,0.1345338816904517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19648611639381905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944449212244915,0.0,0.10546597796691223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955012717081239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010020255465136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422678555693136,0.2719134946747201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192070845045816,0.0,0.0,0.12253157799740777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336255799337272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849229307268253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523818945322744,0.11232087076486999,0.0,0.0,0.09578821738867427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946115063188102,0.06949180414348265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091188951366708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292879284498846,0.0,0.0,0.14058480973363674,0.2837863085346393,0.0,0.0,0.10715248817986812,0.0,0.1075367513173552,0.13305444629615568,0.13704517775984965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029897271161486,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,__sadpotato__,2020/03/14,"I need advice on taking medication So I’ve recently been put on remeron for depression, I’m supposed to take one everyday before bed, but for some reason I just don’t want to do it. I’m not sure if it’s lack of motivation or because I’m not used to being on any medications. I just feel like I’d rather go to sleep on my own, but it’s also to help me get a regular sleep schedule, so I don’t stay up for 4+ days at a time having manic episodes. I only got put on the medication Monday, but I have to go back in a month to tell them how it’s working, and I already skipped a day, I might have skipped two days I’m not sure I also have bad memory problems but that’s a whole other story. I’m just not sure what to do, and I’m wondering has anyone had a similar experience, or some advice ?",3.9636416184971135,3.391309092485553,6.435612716763008,79.73561560693645,70.79190751445087,9.69456647398844,29.438728323699426,9.3871,2.306808554913295,615,21,139,12,10,224,100,173,0.127,0.804,0.069,-0.8618,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,2,10,7,0,0,7,0,13,5,2,4,3,33,30,14,0,6,15,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,4,0,0,4,6,3,0,2,3,1,12,4,20,25,5,23,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,7,11,89,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502176488064875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14128359999172624,0.20477009135220886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706436594730163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952111648206387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844668730902566,0.10689918111159513,0.07804551924169838,0.0,0.10894356910798457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24770506760803665,0.0,0.1102715138858976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12523729657142593,0.0,0.0,0.06473549932292455,0.09146421174642738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689006470621109,0.0,0.14552408955917562,0.0,0.10239678763791696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581539194298213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254868606620538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3869283806303293,0.0,0.13581893554804594,0.0,0.0,0.1021918263964528,0.0,0.0,0.09493215999834066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675601855698806,0.09737210961999157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250682202085565,0.0,0.25740976952269073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163552171929094,0.12641356315264615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562436744298377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13646227989169735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.361998514947996,0.0,0.19252431449503493,0.0,0.11190331768667247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746549586902051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12506609688844642,0.0,0.0,0.11057627403095643,0.0,0.0,0.07551504305072293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429402260341115,0.0,0.0,0.13884239682939806,0.09320691050011504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,conoconocon,2020/03/14,"How can I tell if I've flu/Covid19 symptoms, or its just health anxiety? I've GAD, OCD, and depression. I have a lot of health anxieties and am fairly hypocondriac. I've regularly strongly questioned if I have various illnesses/disorders ranging from ADHD to cancer.

I live in Republic of Ireland and the latest knowledge is that there is risk of spread of Covid19 through the public and if anyone has symptoms they should self isolate. Thankfully I'm not worried about dying from Covid19, and not really anxious about catching it since I wouldn't be considered at risk of severe issues.

However I'm very anxious of knowing if and when to isolate myself to stop it from spreading to others. On one hand I experience some symptoms already from anxiety (fatigue, nausea etc) but with past ecperiences I have previously felt issues that were caused by thinking I'd have issues. As it's impossible to forget Covid19, I'm constantly feeling I might have a fever, or my head feels slightly funny.

Is there anything to do to identify if something is mental or caused by mental state/belief, or if I've actually got symptoms and should isolate?",9.927815533980581,9.05099197572816,9.456621359223302,63.95415533980585,58.85436893203884,12.317669902912623,44.87184466019418,11.407655852321104,5.451747184466019,921,50,141,21,10,297,125,206,0.122,0.8029999999999999,0.075,-0.654,1,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,1,7,6,0,2,4,0,19,11,2,3,0,40,29,21,1,9,14,0,4,0,0,4,9,1,0,1,7,8,0,1,7,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,3,5,11,2,27,21,4,9,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,14,5,98,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.1096370130145344,0.0,0.13502239872751715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239805887023604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578414330667285,0.2538461611595764,0.0,0.07855745977161414,0.0,0.092454156459468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23082799577961066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141001579057613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676655471317773,0.0,0.11660115776257647,0.0,0.12876238690330472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12529951374887627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989947706122136,0.0,0.0,0.11361467737893782,0.0,0.10787324464769772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985624667918267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530311301838796,0.2388447640620922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35179141138524195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617444076179002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920676422419304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955156210063985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22644396451901305,0.11918518205340743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613100356161773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725041564286106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258572759382796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197403722639867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720514606947208,0.1269230805797882,0.0,0.09293675861870668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649221890470192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392930488293348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4670970519449682,0.0,0.0,0.0981985114008518,0.10343642650659893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198909379383407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270019469027392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409648282687875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leafsock,2020/03/14,"My (16F) boyfriend (16M) told me that he struggles with homicidal ideation but says it’s just an underlying thought process of empathizing with killers. Is this a red flag? To start out, yes, I’m aware we’re young, and I don’t want any comments telling me to get out just for the sake of me being young and having options open.

My boyfriend is very sweet albeit shy, and all of our friends think that he’s a very good and empathetic person. However, he also clearly struggles with mental illness that he cannot get treated due to his family not believing in therapy or mental illness. 

I am the first person he’s opened up to, and he recently opened up the floodgates a little too fast and told me that he “understands/gets why murderers kill people”. He didn’t know how to elaborate, but from what I can gather is that he simply empathizes with all parties and understands meaning, even if that means he doesn’t agree with it. He seems confused and seems to think that just because he understands it, it means he’s insane.

I’m going to have another discussion with him about it soon (if he feels comfortable opening up again since I accidentally freaked out when he told me). But I’m not sure if this is an immediate red flag or something we can work with. He says he would never harm anyone and doesn’t feel the need to, and that he dislikes that he has those feelings. Me, being someone with OCD, thinks this sounds very much like OCD or something similar.

On the off chance that it isn’t, I just don’t want to be put in a bad situation.

What should I do?",7.204375000000002,6.528865424342103,6.919342105263159,79.29539473684214,64.16447368421052,10.363157894736844,35.11842105263157,9.673873057562805,3.0829184210526317,1235,49,246,21,16,389,160,304,0.161,0.703,0.136,-0.8986,1,0,2,0,0,0,34.0,2,0,0,2,12,15,2,3,11,1,23,2,0,1,5,69,51,22,2,8,15,0,3,1,1,2,2,3,0,2,22,26,0,0,15,0,0,2,10,8,0,1,5,9,18,7,34,41,3,29,0,0,2,0,35,16,0,10,12,145,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771046540498842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458565855003882,0.11500826828164802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669028946918331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157760163893212,0.0668594595066044,0.0,0.0,0.1235709684815556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244211748844631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339584607752303,0.0,0.16637138958164882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09329312338683038,0.0,0.0,0.08473792498642795,0.0,0.17190866110208272,0.0,0.0623332515924808,0.09199376043927657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134385197493318,0.0,0.06027685349152575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05358374681682447,0.10992743330939572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3584186064565007,0.0,0.0,0.22106179652448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062687670107681,0.08132578229926611,0.08459140760414728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603778967861466,0.19153540037811684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102579509318682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829503844436204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17444270111931118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199695759920088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072781810304437,0.12328408475798575,0.0,0.0,0.0929308819325136,0.1688729071412862,0.0,0.0,0.07763154546010202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293211550600787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337140550273982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958645084332961,0.0,0.1254277936091968,0.0,0.0,0.21083412540542296,0.0,0.08707308195090699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31440970229430065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22835995752002716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714906306281401,0.12938333967267038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989684735452601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984780829017303,0.0,0.0,0.07791300017094295,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WannaKnow00,2020/03/14,Break down Over ps4 Had a breakdown today over the ps4 because I couldn’t use it when I wanted too. The breakdown was pretty bad compared to others it took me an hour and a half to calm down. I was filled with nasty anger and crying my eyes out. What’s wrong with me?,3.2325000000000017,4.135260107142859,3.5664285714285704,94.42857142857143,72.92857142857143,5.6000000000000005,21.142857142857142,3.1291,-0.35223571428571443,210,4,47,0,4,65,42,56,0.264,0.6509999999999999,0.085,-0.91,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,5,0,4,1,1,1,0,8,7,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,4,1,6,1,9,2,0,11,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,3,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830395553913145,0.20664301481780514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723607360503847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3338334039692756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34487112295369193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213195510072291,0.0,0.3766264576206514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927754835266488,0.0,0.0,0.1999430116131565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3706285062151691,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_Woodsman,2020/03/14,"Questions about medium term care options for family member who expressed suicidal thoughts My mom was diagnosed with major depressive disorder in the late 80s, and was able to manage it for about 30 years, until recently. Starting a few months ago (lining up with when her insurance changed, and with it, her meds), she started experiencing deeper depressive episodes. She had panic attacks, loss of appetite  - if it's unpleasant, she probably had it. I and my siblings would often have to stay with her because she felt such despair that she couldn't fathom being alone. 

This has gone on (on and off) for about 2 months now, during which time I and my siblings have worked hard to go through every avenue available to her on her shitty MediCal insurance (we live in California, she had better insurance until her husband / my dad died and his work plan ended for her). She's seen a parade of different doctors, therapists, and psychiatrists, and none were giving her the time and frequent visitation that she needed, and all the while every medical professional changed her drug regimen drastically. Eventually, after multiple panicked episodes where she called someone (generally me) and asked them to come over to see her immediately, we decided (with her input) that the next time it happened we'd go to the psychiatric emergency ward, because we'd tried what we felt were all available options except that one. 

My mom had an episode yesterday that was so severe that she told me and my brother that if we weren't there, she'd take all of her pills and end it all. We checked her into the psychiatric emergency ward (I guess she was a ""5150"", so they're holding her for up to 72 hours). We fear that when she is released, she will still not get the attention she requires to get back to normal. We think we needs daily check ins with whoever is assigning her prescriptions, and constant supervision to guarantee she doesn't hurt herself while her meds are figured out. My siblings and I all have day jobs, some of us have kids, and we can't realistically give her 24/7 supervision, let alone assign her prescriptions. So, with this long preamble out of the way, my question is - what options exist that can work for us? How can we help my mom? Are there reputable inpatient centers / outpatient... companies (I'm very unfamiliar with this world so I don't really know the correct nomenclature) in California that we can leverage, with MediCal or without (whatever the costs are, we'll at least consider it - it's my mom's life we're talking about)?

​

Thanks for spending the time to read this, and I hope someone out there has some answers or direction. This is an alarming time for my family and I don't know what other channels to leverage.",9.009086538461537,8.740088683467743,8.503225806451614,68.0767617866005,60.350806451612904,12.066253101736974,40.04466501240695,11.437924896087663,4.773492183622828,2201,104,365,55,26,700,254,496,0.10400000000000001,0.852,0.044000000000000004,-0.9832,2,2,1,0,0,0,76.0,16,0,1,7,20,13,1,3,16,0,40,8,0,1,6,85,69,33,2,8,7,7,3,0,0,3,8,0,0,1,29,43,0,2,12,2,4,5,9,9,0,1,17,6,73,4,61,43,12,59,0,5,2,0,73,19,0,14,33,267,102,13,0.0794261502623959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040648990793512,0.0,0.0,0.16452307599645372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605820062541089,0.09651146619418162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742527287531815,0.09035871225482063,0.0,0.061073806868115726,0.0,0.09683488798616582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024597540945111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110297979387411,0.0,0.08098025366793937,0.0,0.16804467089185074,0.0684185955790783,0.0,0.08583145177682923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0512232961577767,0.0,0.13681925367344705,0.08061587060900334,0.08243180420043952,0.08298342202985758,0.09102924935965848,0.08129603036772001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210911817057514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406959884041873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13383991443567966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975181144207073,0.08937650082938829,0.0,0.0,0.15252311987109796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299377063728508,0.15238560144184288,0.09027942314094134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874968590973874,0.0,0.07023628236814727,0.0,0.0711502297492843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0532376742894917,0.0,0.0,0.07888808864045581,0.07821875882886087,0.0,0.08502733658660755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881819847939041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730107002186957,0.0,0.08959615705557615,0.0,0.0,0.08121861992962001,0.05610103884065232,0.0,0.0,0.07013474583622477,0.07028964358703158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644909519532526,0.2400404710036696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.372091788958768,0.12679439073954027,0.0,0.0,0.1177869680289418,0.0,0.0,0.08447061187408697,0.0,0.07782076348867997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05382121498272477,0.0,0.0,0.09318947401283552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08563482367525294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17795093164460374,0.0,0.079447644106661,0.0,0.050882425680903835,0.0,0.07842374134195204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329235842078923,0.0,0.0,0.08972894204166884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345950387394567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124364759197514,0.08465770819415053,0.06342982619849027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687931700122392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05971858029095986,0.06383973097181471,0.0,0.07312492792178524,0.0,0.0922198822246383,0.0,0.05089307000075949,0.0,0.06305549132126494,0.2315701347309189,0.0,0.0,0.07589509030861195,0.0,0.053925142358734864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910797585634396,0.0,0.0,0.06553489214584651,0.0,0.0630447810953064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656397452416787,0.0,0.17346955005572487,0.0,0.0,0.0564220582988269,0.0,0.09651146619418162,0.05114783668035617
mentalhealth,Taina4533,2020/03/14,"I don’t know what’s happening to me Where to start here. I don’t know what the hell is wrong with me. I’m not diagnosed and I’m not going to therapy so I’m not gonna claim I have a mental illness because I have no certain way of knowing. These past six months have been hell and these past three weeks have dragged me through a meat grinder.

So for the past months I’ve felt increasingly...bad. Just bad. I can’t handle the noise of people eating and breathing and stuff, can’t stand the noise of wind and rain, etc. All the shit news and fear mongering and general trash on all the media has me on edge since last year and it’s only getting worse, and now, well now I think I might actually be suicidal. 

Throughout this past few months I’ve started to get weird thoughts, like “if I were to kill myself, how would I do it while keeping my body in good enough condition to donate to science?” Or “wonder how my overdose autopsy would look like”, that kind of shit. And now i think about killing myself daily. I’d be sitting at home gaming or browsing the internet or at school and my mind goes “I’m gonna kill myself” like it’s inevitable. I haven’t made any plans or done any research, but the thought comes with such a certainty, as if it were going to happen wether I wanted it or not (even though I actually kind of want to die but not enough to actually do it), And that’s scary. It feels alien, like it’s not even me thinking it. As if someone I despise or don’t know said they were gonna kill themselves and I’d just go “who tf are you and what are you doing in my house”. It’s bizarre and off putting, like I’m desensitizing from myself.

It’s affecting my academic and social life too. I’m barely functioning at school, my grades are slipping and I feel like I’m pushing everybody away, even though the dwindling logical part of my brain knows I’m not doing anything that would push people away. 

So yeah. I don’t know what the hell is going on. I feel like I can’t go to any of my family and friends because they already got a lot of shit going on and they usually come to me for help, so I can’t just spill my guts out and hope for the best, and my family might blame themselves and I can’t do that to them either. 

Point is, I don’t know what the hell is going on. I feel like I should get actual professional help but I don’t know how I’d go about it. I’ve looked up hotlines in my area but I feel like I’d just take up space and prevent someone who actually needs help from getting it (even though i know that train of thought is completely irrational)...shit. I really needed to get this off my chest. I guess maybe putting it into writing is better than nothing, right?",3.436713381555151,4.472676484629297,4.333033905967452,88.62070818264016,72.58047016274864,7.627649186256781,26.121564195298372,7.993328176185818,1.3142434358047022,2108,68,462,29,40,681,237,553,0.122,0.746,0.132,0.6381,0,0,0,0,0,4,54.0,0,2,4,3,30,34,12,1,16,1,44,12,8,5,3,104,109,49,6,12,25,0,6,9,1,9,3,1,1,0,31,29,1,2,23,1,1,14,20,16,1,2,12,9,56,18,55,86,10,58,4,0,2,0,16,24,7,15,26,285,87,6,0.0,0.0,0.2802928291431693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633925879786845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171948225791086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047272789302703996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079439620553433,0.0,0.0959292620497067,0.07003654274326547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060285555936963074,0.050805916768440484,0.0,0.06380905092503131,0.0,0.06412822720652964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989685018150253,0.060230561552696925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583060195050738,0.059619406789765274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05878673775604825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058781134384803625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871320941263687,0.06406696832260486,0.15176896419245084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830909562721222,0.06464220954616302,0.1452309693557103,0.16415643685115536,0.055156732384068284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044382285985286415,0.0,0.1500646328390806,0.0,0.261181018913398,0.04818259811450228,0.045944450519745085,0.0,0.06328274488169093,0.0,0.10159781241049344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155136148283884,0.0,0.057622566001301626,0.05705638852797689,0.0,0.06628444676795063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05106024034039064,0.25421993950266386,0.11964139144486632,0.28413512548771097,0.0468257867708984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04057548768235547,0.2525849267835559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647958044850573,0.0,0.0,0.048838148546971084,0.0,0.054356364166256964,0.0,0.0,0.05771177170223835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05789159856901192,0.12188129154983295,0.05800362511236865,0.0,0.1375574591655145,0.0,0.0,0.08519028825785563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055120550261702636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04368992597949732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062207927793561976,0.219353093272128,0.07965101641905555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054304608577664164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154972796700797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03680108745094809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04905818201504798,0.05464386870723475,0.0,0.0,0.11627591791798116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358681079334408,0.04751954889756031,0.0,0.0,0.05855849939110867,0.09734684863841783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132050560930902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576140591830601,0.06283610303273357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04319190106062255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656939877552873,0.0,0.0,0.11042635809998808,0.1693198704817607,0.13681603929000125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632681525680773,0.0,0.06776574224591445,0.04559760018054698,0.04607935157125149,0.0,0.05165044437420456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229724367650934,0.0,0.0,0.058541918616727875,0.12242300207772268,0.06280768609647366,0.0,0.03699304790233345
mentalhealth,11132K,2020/03/14,"Question about getting prescribed medication Hello, I am hoping to get some clarification/advice. I have been struggling with depression and anxiety for a few years. I have gone to around 3 counseling sessions and I did not like it and did not feel that it helped me. 

I am finding it harder to manage my depression and anxiety and want to try going on medication. I do not have an interest or time for counseling at the moment. My question is can I just get prescribed medication from a general practitioner? Or do I need to see a psychiatrist? I just want to tell someone how I am feeling (depressed, anxious, etc) without getting into the reasons for why I feel that way.

I know counseling is a good idea and helps a lot of people, I am just not ready to talk to someone.",6.456659056316589,7.062642184931509,7.547625570776257,69.8434170471842,65.50684931506851,10.59847792998478,37.45509893455099,10.504223727775694,4.205163774733638,613,31,106,15,9,208,84,146,0.155,0.76,0.085,-0.8823,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,1,8,0,15,3,0,2,0,36,30,9,0,4,10,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,9,0,0,9,0,0,2,5,4,0,0,4,4,16,4,20,26,4,10,0,3,1,0,7,4,0,7,4,84,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252818130102687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20750081193568626,0.15321417873248913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073227207000325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504329112110984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512543030544078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057235698233915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395598789540488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834274453430903,0.0,0.07707706877095896,0.11375324114701847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18180904306448495,0.0,0.0,0.13470317868241793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15310065209122833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453426643354806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625802493679378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530091581270265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.409874481862364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056194334467733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402317053130073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30385520241560393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944193282354214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807311994139283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298240439785517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178148891348386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900777083504913,0.1185395454341846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908223858316142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207838866181353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15998665744191226,0.10765037611165926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237769804591787,0.0,0.0,0.13073470176175753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733607699603836
mentalhealth,AbSdCdHd,2020/03/14,"How to help a friend in another country who is dealing with thoughts of suicide. Okay, so this is a difficult one. I met this dude in a discord server a little over 2 years ago who is from Turkey (I'm from the U.S). We usually play games when timezones line up and he's in a bad place right now. He's expressed thoughts of suicide and even gone as far as to set a date. I don't like what he's saying and I've tried talking to him but he seems so hopeless about everything like there aren't any other options. I only know a couple of friends of his who live in his city who are also in the discord, and I've already tried reaching out to them. He tells me he doesn't want to talk to his parents about it and he feels like his aforementioned IRL friends don't like him. I don't know what I can do to help him. Any ideas?",1.6553904761904759,3.2001976628571462,2.917714285714286,94.92361904761907,78.08571428571429,5.80952380952381,24.809523809523807,6.42735559955562,0.5676666666666668,641,23,148,5,15,207,100,175,0.17,0.7140000000000001,0.115,-0.8428,1,0,0,0,0,3,15.0,1,0,1,0,10,12,0,0,9,1,11,0,0,1,0,19,21,13,2,1,1,1,1,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,0,7,2,0,1,5,3,0,1,4,2,15,9,26,17,0,20,0,1,0,0,34,12,0,2,10,86,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088541039162493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16293867591224534,0.118077991901793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20081810638210346,0.15482696743309413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328402608262135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337515466531427,0.0,0.0,0.15222368370692158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752336534361856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327009295385607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465775606519852,0.10548328012729613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34222885401836395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19793728836041435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666821815370341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16229237379085096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28854304641940176,0.14798702207494493,0.1303802391440054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005344422085537,0.11229670402787408,0.0,0.0,0.16395110122872253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542658817714359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609479238931878,0.0,0.11741953343301635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441767874444255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230166728981522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23735565850429285,0.12905516574550432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344398611497645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20049328967482974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626188381885078,0.0,0.08708952154999983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508364361447484
mentalhealth,SalvatoreAmanda,2020/03/14,I feel like nothing i do is ever good enough. I feel like nothing i ever do is enough. Ive been looking for a job these past few months and nothing. So i decided to get help from a company that helps people find jobs. I got a call today that tomorrow they needed a clerk at a furniture. I took it but idk if i did the right decision. Its on 7.25 for 7 hours. Should i have waited for something permanent. All my life i have struggled with self esteem issues and i always feel like i dont do anything right. I sometimes get suicidal thoughts and i just want them to stop. I will be graduating college in 2 months and i feel nothing.,0.9067441860465096,3.27545331782946,2.857023255813957,89.89669767441866,85.5891472868217,5.92062015503876,23.328682170542635,7.3011,1.0876486821705431,494,19,102,8,15,165,84,129,0.114,0.7709999999999999,0.114,-0.6059,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,4,5,0,1,6,0,14,1,0,0,3,24,27,7,1,4,3,0,4,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,5,5,0,2,8,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,5,5,20,4,10,19,4,15,0,0,1,0,6,5,0,1,12,68,25,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294739671142636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018134371423432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633495404949827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500236338515066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25567773898647383,0.0,0.0,0.22382896368499824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502321422150293,0.2651630776084774,0.0,0.0,0.1130805250635916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292802585861089,0.0,0.0,0.10377293146535482,0.09895253684055398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585775645133827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121842173093612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913460437007598,0.24555185292736026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738917092905958,0.18133433592215198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389610856907598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975089394807152,0.0,0.0,0.09173899178171782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4748619882262986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810754507648065,0.08577390791959669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113174282534252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907000863000478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952479632066758,0.12236515052630775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343791717698576,0.0,0.12934207925609126,0.0,0.1353328145167664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822219379468768,0.0,0.0,0.11727487988526067,0.0,0.13746073788731078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297499513281303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Enryu84,2020/03/14,"Help with Akathisia from Abilify Hi, I am currently taking Abilify for very low level schizophrenia and it gives me bad akathisia.  I have tried haldol, seraqual, and olanzipine but Abilify works the best by far.  I also am sensitive about my weight and olanzipine gained me a lot of weight and I don't feel the cravings on abilify. I take benedryl with it and that definately helps the  akathisia.  Any good ideas?",5.804369369369372,8.100641959459463,4.847027027027028,82.27882882882884,68.5945945945946,8.717117117117118,33.954954954954964,9.2995712137729,3.25889009009009,331,16,58,7,6,98,53,74,0.048,0.73,0.223,0.9464,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,4,0,4,2,0,0,0,11,8,7,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,7,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,8,2,8,8,2,5,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,1,1,36,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18623580012443905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836787245099584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19444689793806152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443954866730844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775223064312892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234018134077736,0.0,0.1953305287203532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3121920408582408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628956416438276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979881067171372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35019684287507363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811171760622506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19215219296755512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5671755278037679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954100512910342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sk3kid,2020/03/14,"Recovering (I don’t know what’s wrong with me) It was only since a year and a half ago that I stopped hanging out with abusive friends. Yet I still feel pain

(This’ll be really long)

I used to be in a group of girls that loved gossip and the majority of our conversations were about boys we liked. We’d spend a lot of our time talking to each other about our crushes, but because of all this focus on romance stuff, they’d get into bad habits (lying, insulting each other, etc.) which turned into hair tugging, screaming at each other and emotional manipulation. They’d always target me because I was the “jokester” of the group and I was always playful (just kidding or playing around). Even my own best friend would make threats to me. We’d do each other favours where if we got gossip about each other’s crushes, we’d trade for a bit of money. She’d eventually go on to scam me and occasionally steal my money. She’d then threaten to tell my crush lies about me (that I hated him, that I was a horrible friend) and I was so scared. Idk how I didn’t see through her empty threats till later, cause she’d threaten me every other day. It was so emotionally draining and I’d cry almost every other day. 

I think I finally lost it when I spent my last Halloween with them. They weren’t doing anything they’d promised (they promised to me and another friend we’d go out a bit) and when I was getting tired of them just sitting and gossiping, i told them I was getting bored and “when would we go out?”. The group’s leader snapped at me after I was getting tired, and she kept repeating to me “why are you so selfish, you’re so whiny and childish” and she cussed at me to the point where I cried. If you ever met her back then she’d scare the sh-t outta you. It was awkward for the rest of the group so they just watched. (I was a weak person before don’t judge please, I cried easily lol). The leader of the group was the most aggressive one, and was ironically, one of my longtime friends.

I think one day in summer I kinda finally snapped. It was literally just one faithful day in summer, I cut ties with my crush (he turned out to be manipulative too, since he’d play around with me and three other girls’ emotions), I cut ties with the old group, blocking them and never speaking to them again. I reconnected with another old friend who introduced me to a new group

I love my new group so much they’re literally the best. But even after the year and a half, I still kinda feel the whiplash the old group gave me. I feel so bad. I’m supposed to get over it because it was all so petty, but it felt so emotionally draining that I feel like I’ve got a huge void in me now 

It’s not easy when the friends you had to let go were people you knew for 8+ years

Currently I’m fine. But I feel emotionally drained (a bit), really low energy, and sometimes I’ll stop my hobbies for weeks at a time. I’m really into art, and I’ve been having a major creativity block for 3 months now, which I keep hating myself for. If I stop a hobby for too long, I’d lose my practice and get weaker and weaker. I can’t stop having low self esteem

My confidence has gone up, but just because I’m confident when talking to new people doesn’t mean I have a high self esteem. And sure people joke like “oh yea I’m a bummer” but I literally can’t tolerate myself even when I’m doing nothing and everyone says they’re fine with me. 

I feel randomly stressed, not in social situations, but just thinking about the future, or thinking about everything I do, and how it could possibly hurt me in the future, I can’t stop. I hate it when my stress leads into physical pain (stomach, chest, muscle? Pain). I’m always stressed about wether I make people upset or not just by tiny actions (like if I joke or if I accidentally mix up something). The worst feeling is when my stomach feels like it’s sinking into me. Like there’s some sort of invisible pressure. 

Remember the friend I mentioned earlier that I’d trade information we had on each other’s crushes with? She’s still my friend now. But I don’t even know how to feel. Ever since all the drama stopped, she looks disinterested in me, our conversations are always awkward, and she still hangs out with the old group occasionally. I’m so freaking frustrated at myself because I’M the one who started talking about my crush in the first place. We used to have so much fun and now it feels like I’m talking to a shell of someone I know. She doesn’t like joking around anymore. Was I only interesting because of my crush situation?? 

Lastly I hate being so defensive. Whenever I see a story of someone online getting away with so much manipulative sh-t, I can’t help but go on rants and get angry for hours because I know what it’s like to be hurt by someone like that. One of my My online friends struggles with depression severely and when she got into a fight with an extremely popular fanartist, it only made her depression worse. I keep texting her to comfort her because I now know what manipulative people are like and it just makes me so sick. I’m scared that my defensiveness will make people think I’m crazy. When I hear about things like the Zoe Quinn and Alec holowka situation, petty online artists drama, or anything involving a sensitive topic dropped in the middle of drama, I can’t help but get upset, and I don’t want people to see me as this grumpy person that hates others. 


I’m so sorry this was so long but I’m honestly so tired of feeling really empty and I need some way to pick up my attitude and get happy again. I need to have some sort of motivation other than “oh, well just try” because I keep trying and I’m still stuck. I’ve been stuck for a while. I also need advice on how to regain motivation for my hobbies. Yes I draw occasionally, but it’s not as much as I wish I could do. When I see artists online pumping out 10 sketches a day, vs me that’s now on 2-3 per week, I get upset at myself. If anyone can help, please do. I really want to try getting better

(This isn’t to say I’m not ever happy, I have my moments, but I feel like I’m lacking a lot more than I already have)",4.125585494365382,5.206560402936383,5.305535804691456,82.12383632408918,70.99021207177816,8.01851080984793,27.87661960210761,8.362051860318783,1.8446820535898447,4818,169,966,73,87,1600,420,1226,0.231,0.608,0.161,-0.9987,3,0,1,0,1,0,135.0,13,5,11,9,82,102,15,13,52,3,79,14,4,20,8,205,182,99,0,17,39,0,14,13,10,3,8,5,0,8,51,74,0,14,29,12,6,10,20,52,1,10,40,25,161,50,127,119,32,144,1,8,6,2,106,50,0,23,94,633,212,5,0.0,0.04332267730572693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03573017848721929,0.03241201649191009,0.0,0.03661383165567346,0.0,0.040349577810359374,0.029240431071738706,0.12169759682788107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668164399406552,0.0,0.0,0.03626192770542115,0.02556658561485419,0.0,0.06017855244917743,0.09764984898789923,0.0,0.0,0.034353332424092484,0.02811566430909371,0.06105927123004514,0.200603139813786,0.0,0.03111349809120318,0.0,0.07674388466163211,0.03233812275599374,0.11975612835058322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037561574251265765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05838718380044125,0.0,0.12049239096538684,0.11790463649067212,0.0,0.06298549909636665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056493945298008,0.0,0.0,0.040778822979683285,0.09660141390567696,0.09922341840741752,0.06161394382304194,0.03493872400050571,0.032861605459509995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22185590405474745,0.1044860784674734,0.03510743031731825,0.08010873439878648,0.0,0.031101546791070613,0.0,0.0,0.28249461946041515,0.0,0.2292398441796184,0.0,0.1039015776653045,0.0,0.08773135347419514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784668416178178,0.0,0.18049821846093028,0.0,0.0,0.041210586265629214,0.0,0.07352477219010459,0.038632155553047685,0.0,0.0,0.03600843763767926,0.0,0.07828560802596439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750000148233402,0.0,0.0,0.10047382439496268,0.059609515468242585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037389440263976725,0.0,0.2322249007078996,0.0,0.0,0.09707467692818114,0.030704775294288226,0.040906061942762084,0.039914216660789835,0.06217126442518816,0.06600135697814341,0.0345979934775985,0.097627728468354,0.0,0.0,0.0398292058936139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029185249038160707,0.0,0.1075157733947369,0.08133582192376576,0.028200616789450364,0.10594199060775224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035084400284813064,0.0,0.15347218958030984,0.0,0.14866136146674505,0.08342631799941627,0.11672087403040356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17744341184089887,0.06385301510708521,0.03820187665801732,0.08027317014146629,0.03456505088579663,0.04122071710706432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712002845720422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04142018667951086,0.0,0.0,0.05815474532594413,0.10982162972267596,0.0,0.11654794707868535,0.0,0.07628900960388267,0.04130721405170402,0.0,0.09073901840385518,0.1232993041125712,0.0,0.0372726655115249,0.09294235420038048,0.028148959068618005,0.036162994962068665,0.04093070329287955,0.02588037634434397,0.0,0.1460013541019284,0.1834161864715232,0.12565273276953826,0.0382249107724172,0.0418573377365746,0.0,0.0,0.034461388882559806,0.0,0.0,0.11755589098693905,0.031958780951930554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024291674247573773,0.11714452931438073,0.0,0.0,0.04264183620428698,0.12607573812338255,0.0,0.03493872400050571,0.0,0.07447421135801828,0.07954284550185704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315957369790948,0.0,0.0,0.043133103992341916,0.029023013180488506,0.058659298853685975,0.0,0.032875667182374176,0.0,0.03299356371686505,0.0,0.042047102493963484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037262111797480936,0.05194841232620465,0.03997728595794869,0.0,0.07063856733279864
mentalhealth,Bilifred,2020/03/14,I am not sure weather or not I feel love towards anyone i don’t think I have ever loved anyone. This despite never having been abused or neglected. I was raised by two loving parents who support the things I do. They clearly communicate their love for me but when the time comes to reciprocate I cringe when I say “I love you”. While I appreciate the things they do for me I just cannot feel anything deeper than that. Is the shame I feel when I think this me rejecting love? This extends to other family members and friends as well. Maybe I just don’t know what love is? I was just looking for input from anyone who might sympathize or otherwise understands what this may mean. (I am 19M for reference),3.023026389668725,5.3402340875912415,4.023649635036495,84.9851768669287,76.73722627737226,7.135092644581696,25.13700168444694,8.139509932561175,1.6389285794497477,558,20,107,10,13,180,82,137,0.198,0.655,0.14800000000000002,-0.8925,1,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,1,3,0,8,14,0,1,4,0,16,7,0,0,4,27,34,10,0,0,9,1,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,12,2,0,1,9,0,0,1,6,3,1,1,3,5,23,11,11,29,0,9,0,2,1,7,16,1,0,5,7,84,35,0,0.0,0.14442655115395228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25569706316240426,0.0,0.1003098299112159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500240973791232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026169976491358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491248052483576,0.0,0.18490248680645144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417636707974766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699072560178103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236174390646234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7701098208676259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246068168851035,0.132780225049824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293121455816416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401353001736457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13535082367674806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09693640632353348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383258716720379,0.11488531766307356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16196426220724727,0.15621177090264945,0.0,0.0,0.07107840190018433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907445204829654,0.12689779215838826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959893347606678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SuspiciousMolasses0,2020/03/14,"I feel like I am losing my mind. I (20F) haven't felt like myself for a long time, years I would say. In fact, I don't even know what my ""self"" is anymore. I feel detached from myself. Like I am going through to motions. I have no motivation. 

I think suicidal thoughts every single day (would never act on them though), and sometimes these thoughts can be quite graphic -- **TRIGGER WARNING** \-- I often imagine myself getting a large kitchen knife and cutting my arms. I almost have a desire to do it. 

I can't concentrate on my school work for more than 60 seconds, I can study for hours and retain absolutely nothing, I work much slower than usual...I used to be an A+ student and now I am barely passing, even in easy GPA-booster courses... I have no motivation to exercise and I haven't had motivation to do hobbies that I enjoy for years. 

I have horrible memory and I am often quite forgetful. I sleep way too much. Even 12 hours of sleep might night be enough. I often go to bed extremely late and I could sleep all day. I don't want to do this, but I can't seem to get myself on a normal schedule. Nothing I do in any aspect of my life works anymore.

I've been in abusive relationships and ignored red flags...I often engage in self-destructive behavior (sex, drugs/alcohol), which I find pleasurable, and desire to do even though I don't really want to do it, and then afterwards I feel horrible about myself. 

I am very impatient in general and I often get road rage...Within the past year I have had multiple people tell me that I was acting out of character, or that my personality ""switched""...I used to be known for being timid and shit and quiet (I still am) but I have been having outbursts that I cannot even control..the words just come out of my mouth and sometimes I can be quite rude..This does not happen too often but it has happened quite a few times. I don't even think the words before they come out, it's like I just start talking and I cannot even control what I say. Once I screamed at a class mate over a group project and then hung up, and then immediately called her back to apologize. 

I am plagued by social anxiety to the point where interacting with an individual is torture and makes me nauseous from the anxiety. I am scared of getting close with anyone so I just push everyone away. I can be friends with someone one day and then drop them like a hot potato the next. I have been in shitty romantic relationships (abuse, assault) and I cannot trust anyone now because of that. I don't really have any friends..

I feel so empty. My parents do not really believe in mental health struggles, they say ""just don't be depressed"" about people who are depressed. 

When I was about 15 (almost 6 years ago now) I was almost certain I was going to kill myself but I did not when I happened to hear a song come on the radio and it was about how everyone has a place on the earth. It was weird how in the exact moment I wanted to kill myself I heard that, so I thought it was meant for me to hear. I know I will never do anything now (I think it would be selfish to my family), but I think about it quite often..

 I have been struggling for a long time and no one has any idea. I've always faked the ""depression screenings"" at the annual doctor appointment. I want help. I want to feel better. I don't know how to bring this up to my parents.",2.543701078127306,4.6025380990991,3.9407054595579183,86.2558994240142,77.16816816816821,6.769615517156503,24.58169645054891,7.755146713633716,1.3169515384236692,2618,91,523,40,61,862,285,666,0.16,0.753,0.08800000000000001,-0.9941,3,0,2,0,1,2,108.0,0,0,4,14,43,32,6,4,24,0,79,12,6,11,6,114,123,42,3,12,13,2,7,5,3,5,4,9,2,2,22,32,1,3,25,3,0,12,22,19,0,3,20,18,91,13,71,88,7,80,0,4,2,1,29,28,1,13,43,374,113,11,0.0,0.13770669010697514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05151287718549667,0.06210417010285664,0.17457264473254078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04835392886407919,0.0,0.0,0.11855467794003152,0.0,0.08891120664991825,0.0,0.11526319128369895,0.0812666737448557,0.0,0.047821313158488414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05459823811074857,0.04468462376922741,0.0,0.03542460147228905,0.0,0.04944912348737615,0.06547244539976416,0.0,0.05139543682371027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05933895927722981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15017530553836084,0.0,0.0,0.13035534029999313,0.04639778936725302,0.0,0.0,0.11243250590090073,0.0,0.1501556196092355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948020464415716,0.05085429705232421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060045341591956736,0.0,0.26867749343807085,0.0,0.0489619570856174,0.11105721847977196,0.0,0.0,0.054782923287385925,0.0,0.14691613861407993,0.04151530134689819,0.055796736580267625,0.0,0.05311341364138388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979454049987992,0.0,0.12144471112223153,0.0,0.09907934998715208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15416503474298876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06177045303250345,0.13099313765766685,0.0,0.03895132083565177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144574405689546,0.0,0.0,0.06560149615481754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12858487427347,0.0,0.09581068387472967,0.0,0.06555298866243002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041046300242438216,0.14195320231317013,0.0,0.0,0.10285477325302672,0.0,0.06501258400648317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038790283132681486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856333644048084,0.06164776288155476,0.05867666286972158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543817123765111,0.0,0.08963927990057627,0.0,0.061802885798503425,0.05453427644731225,0.056937527169951235,0.11152026924640583,0.0,0.0,0.06188749811852975,0.07875653625126516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905323697655655,0.0,0.05547458231457444,0.08057523695454291,0.05074125094864012,0.0607147840070708,0.0,0.054934725262616765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090468984587076,0.0,0.0,0.11168431270020543,0.0,0.0,0.12478131162518807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386392414589624,0.0581803575393848,0.05881255544221095,0.0,0.05290308030516045,0.12124720420615805,0.0,0.059651243452964735,0.0,0.0,0.17446222668518285,0.0592379755622582,0.04923820026697124,0.0,0.11494872086133487,0.0,0.0411320489261561,0.0,0.04640840426973155,0.0,0.0,0.1215027849030972,0.0,0.06356521383889474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046708310915747016,0.050792543518108364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14894356858125585,0.1141897015132667,0.13840356696737074,0.10165691196213128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003804056375451,0.06400227660659713,0.047948574838599975,0.17138013374926436,0.04612668619037375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269189195360924,0.0,0.0,0.12384352196087105,0.0,0.0,0.14968916829481527
mentalhealth,ihatenamingnames,2020/03/14,"I think maybe I should see a psychologist, just a little rant For a while I thought it was a possibility I have bipolar but I always dismissed it because I have a habit of self diagnosing myself for little things. But lately I have been thinking that maybe I do really have it, a mild case though! Not expecting any help just wanted a safe place I guess to rant or explain myself because I haven’t said this to anyone. 

For years and years I have gone through phases where I will be unbelievably active, social, talkative and then it’s like the opposite. I just feel like sleeping all day, not working out, not seeing people, not doing work. I always thought that this was mood swings but I am starting to think it might be something more. During these down periods I think about how worthless I am, how no one loves me and how alone I feel (even though I have a supportive brother/ brothers gf who is basically a sister/ my best friend). I feel horrible being around my father because he makes me so stressed and I feel like he always yells at me and I can never do anything right (I usually try to avoid him). I have never done any self harm or anything but I just feel really down those days and cry when I usually never do (and when I finally do it feels like a panic attack because I can’t breathe). 

It is only relatively recently that I think it is starting to impact my life and get slightly more drastic. During a high earlier last month I lost about 4kg in a week because I barely ate anything and what I did eat I worked off at the gym. Last year at university I almost got an absent fail because for like three weeks I couldn’t bring myself to attend classes, so my grades have really suffered (they used to be really good in high school). However, most recently just last week I decided I wanted to loose my virginity so I went on tinder and did it with a guy I hadn’t met before that night, mind you I wasn’t drunk when I met up with him I just decided that is what I wanted to do. When I lost my virginity i was definitely during a ‘high’ because for about 5/6 days I basically didn’t have an hour to myself I was booked out with work, social events, etc. which I usually don’t do. Compared to tonight where I have a party and I really just don’t want to go at all and wish I could stay in bed. 

Anyway just thought I would get my thoughts out there and I think I should go see a psychologist soon. Not to get diagnosed with bipolar but just deal with the issues I clearly have whatever they may be..",4.1427045908183615,5.3108983952095805,5.288198602794413,81.93593063872257,71.03592814371258,8.361077844311378,27.48952095808383,8.761943790366164,1.992445508982036,1980,68,394,35,36,656,228,501,0.131,0.755,0.114,-0.8455,1,2,1,0,0,0,43.0,0,1,2,8,31,22,1,3,21,0,53,13,2,5,6,92,100,34,0,11,21,4,6,5,2,6,5,2,1,3,23,22,3,2,19,3,0,6,17,10,0,2,24,11,74,11,44,63,7,69,0,5,3,3,26,25,0,7,42,282,97,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506718669533654,0.0672987553316572,0.0,0.0,0.16220346031333474,0.0,0.0,0.08837603823838519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04543490053181172,0.0,0.16041679866052685,0.057845179153604674,0.0,0.07392311177371695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772746118607041,0.0,0.0552924317805349,0.0,0.06819156101939998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05188052734668587,0.0,0.07137649483618441,0.12571843996440485,0.0669906032600139,0.0,0.1319048460309797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649618391202601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648984570005792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246887769048839,0.04291808552533851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19713232507797465,0.13926325518132165,0.0,0.07118143255358085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05020269475677957,0.0,0.10184670017275964,0.0,0.07385824477991552,0.05450138973312128,0.0519697256237632,0.0,0.07158180914160009,0.06433952920882824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043554123878794815,0.20596197372507966,0.0,0.0,0.06399132864356212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06782130273688586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15889992783053955,0.07329925988582807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045896662992980265,0.15872754057881694,0.13025226616563318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186473634825336,0.0,0.058646178540247874,0.0,0.04337405665863769,0.0,0.1305604880109568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893256104774337,0.06561037183321926,0.0,0.051865701076430105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503476730995302,0.0,0.0,0.06097848753443784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04403152271299609,0.04941953685355767,0.0,0.07623897830856054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04504832925549089,0.0,0.06788933384507613,0.0,0.0,0.07325417675332001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20813639034163145,0.0,0.1283180526208728,0.0,0.0,0.05549179999066455,0.061810008207965964,0.0,0.0,0.06576232257094604,0.15533979964546954,0.0,0.13557475429996352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06502603138309973,0.13247602754493046,0.0,0.05002408904432007,0.0,0.0,0.09198508886911667,0.06925907938676971,0.0,0.0,0.07443334437818383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07373751746694993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04316922954891727,0.2498159175773136,0.12768328001959015,0.20634460215605074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04411654644608645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056121083038340534,0.21469590946172945,0.0,0.1533054369514036,0.0,0.15636695385330826,0.0,0.0,0.06023628063857836,0.0,0.0,0.07472276307221004,0.0,0.0,0.18922224716885352,0.0,0.0,0.04615929131841782,0.0,0.0,0.12553323814231554
mentalhealth,Myself___,2020/03/14,"How can I be of help to my friends? Sometimes, my friend feels really down and she has some family issues, and whenever she complains about it in our group chat (with another friend [I dont get to see her in person anymore]) I feel useless and dont know how to help

I'm not very empathetic either so sometimes I just get really akward and I never really know what to say/do unlike another friend of mine, but sometimes they're not available to help so Idk how to help her by myself",5.153436426116841,5.464139824742269,6.286134020618558,78.7887199312715,68.2783505154639,9.765635738831616,28.537800687285234,9.725611199111238,2.500128522336769,381,12,75,8,6,128,60,97,0.075,0.7390000000000001,0.18600000000000005,0.8863,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,3,1,19,13,10,0,0,5,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,3,14,4,14,12,2,4,0,1,1,0,17,3,0,1,1,51,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004616595122557,0.0,0.0,0.14208509896224294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33582217105597684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506197407931772,0.0,0.14488298553353926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4427594284385888,0.0,0.14970506721241214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3841227863991205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14953640128894133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747462074542778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049846714923307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250976236595862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275346820538414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393385938946513,0.0,0.0,0.11416744532341552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4250923524831076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182125520761021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cherry_blossom_dream,2020/03/14,"Idk I feel nothing. I care abt nothing. I used to believe in stupid shit like love but now I don’t. I u see to believe in a god but now I don’t . I don’t believe anything at all, Nd the way out is no where. I’m trapped.",-3.686495726495728,-2.377533923076921,-0.17512820512820326,106.60901709401712,109.3846153846154,2.311111111111112,19.23931623931624,3.1291,-1.0556863247863248,164,7,46,0,9,58,34,52,0.287,0.578,0.135,-0.7854,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,2,0,2,0,4,2,1,1,1,6,10,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,2,7,3,6,10,1,8,0,0,1,1,1,5,1,0,3,26,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787371873596656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7341304515120319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214499920831652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982290388637016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611300460974464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19603158314845515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41681873504046735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17308037004529275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229527960044541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18759116160418984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17240334084021078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway912839713,2020/03/14,"I don't know who I am. (PLEASE FORGIVE ME IF I SOUND LIKE AN IDIOT I'M WRITING THIS AT 4AM)  
I'm a teen, been depressed and horribly anxious for all my life. BUT, I am trying to get better. I need to understand myself better, the problem is that I know nothing about myself. This probably sounds absurd, and that's because it is, I don't know how it's possible at all but I just want to figure it out.

Nearly all my life I've always acted like a different person, and somehow I forgot who I was. Maybe I never really did know who I was. I discussed this with a friend and did a little research into the topic and it might be a personality disorder? Maybe someone can help me define which kind of personality disorder it would be? Just throwing it out there, I'm just a kid, and it's 4am and I haven't slept in 16 hours, so take everything I say with a grain of salt. I'd just like some answers to help myself.",0.73873015873016,2.9689392751322745,3.3411640211640226,87.13809523809526,84.82010582010581,5.928042328042327,21.16931216931217,7.2636822038024595,0.8083185185185187,709,23,146,11,21,247,107,189,0.1,0.7340000000000001,0.166,0.925,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,9,11,1,0,10,0,17,3,1,1,4,41,31,12,0,5,7,0,0,3,1,2,2,3,0,4,16,12,0,1,8,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,7,4,22,8,17,20,4,12,0,1,0,0,14,8,0,4,5,105,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602313264485037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15752463483361384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499977834404303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24664219533015685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009727565442985,0.0,0.0,0.1456824627044701,0.31961480740292664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531739355687824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772903182786027,0.0,0.07285031515824547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18692397371516087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13731780561875948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14520265214782313,0.30652471460975195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19697759621541572,0.20436629173573392,0.1397529614235847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801673303900469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14792110461531405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339110606197292,0.10754276132688237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379399870211114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3652542220050988,0.0,0.15306045328599688,0.0,0.1571947796271713,0.0,0.0,0.15033716013525214,0.13342281297607594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932720416017734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088626080960858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814490311277212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483961293945443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466887901637808,0.0,0.0,0.14515930815997705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224382364699395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905236736164996,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChuyUrLord,2020/03/14,"Am I suicidal? I feel stupid even asking this or if this is the right place to vent but I will just vent and wait for the mod to erase this. It will help me writing it down anyway.

I have to psychologists for the longest time. I just recently stopped going to meet with them because I turned eighteen and my mother could not force me. I felt awful back then but now I just crave someone to talk to. I have friends, my family will offer more judgment than support and I do not have the time or resources to go see an actual psychologist. I'm going to breakdown my problems into points to make this easier to write and more concise. I'll talk about my worries about suicide after listing my points, they are just there for context and venting purposes.

1) I get super anxious and paranoid about everything. I cannot go about my life without thinking of the possibility of a tsunami hitting (I live in a coastal area). I get paranoid because there are a few naval bases in my city and fear the attack of a foreign attack. I always am under the impression someone is reading my mind and observing me. Every little thing I do is dissected vigorously by me minutes later and then I proceed to beat myself up for it. Simple comments lead to days of me feeling like I just ruined a possible relationship with someone.

2) I have huge responsibilities because of family problems. My dad is not in good health and could pass at any moment and the coronavirus outbreak is not helping me at all. My mom sucks at handling finances and does not take my concerns into consideration. She prioritizes being new furniture over food and saving money because we have always lived paycheck to paycheck.

3) I am gay. I hate it. No going around it but I embraced it. It is more freeing talking about it but I still have the crushing feeling of being forever alone because I am not just ugly but lack any redeeming personality traits. My dad accepts it but my mom hates it and told me she was going to ""look for help."" I live in college dorms thankfully but the virus might force me to go back home.

4) I cannot accept a compliment. People tell me I'm funny but I never believe it. People tell me I am nice to be around but I always feel they are saying that to be nice. I feel like if they really meant it they would spend time with me, invite me places, talk to me more but nope. They always come to talk to my roommates and do not talk to me directly unless my roommates directly acknowledge my existence. When people say I am handsome it is only because I am tall for my people's standards but I am also sooo skinny and I grew up with my mom telling me I look sick and yellowish all the time.

5) I cannot keep relationships. In the rare instance that people start talking to me because they want to talk to me, I usually distance myself from them by ghosting them, talking to them less, and avoiding them purposefully. I do not know why. Sometimes I tell myself that it is better to rip the bandage now. 

6) I have no passions. I do not like anything. The things I used to like do not excite me as much as they did when I was little. Pokemon was huge for me but now I act excited on the outside to justify my purchase of the games but in honesty, I am not that interested. I liked watching cartoons by now I find them a drag. Marvel movies are too much effort to go watch at the theaters. I cannot sit still long enough to read a book. Now I just drown myself in work and school assignments.

7) I do not share my feelings. Talking about my feelings to people is so awkward and I feel like they are mocking me for being so...like this. Whenever I have a problem with something I just let it roll by. I let people step all over me because I do not want to make an uproar. I do not voice my concerns because I think other people are smarter than me and have already accounted for what I am going to say and decided it is not important.

There a few more things but I think this post is too long already.

I wonder if I am suicidal because I think about it often. How would people feel if I die? How would people react if I die? What are the benefits of my death? Death is not that bad, it is just an eternal nap.  It is better for the environment. I would stop burdening people with my presence. What do I care about what people feel? I would be dead and all consequences be damned. For the longest time, I thought these thoughts were normal or I was just in that stage but it has been too long and too intense for that by this point. I cannot look over ledge without wondering if I should jump or not. This happens every single time, no kidding. Writing this just made me feel worse.",2.995365853658537,5.069957030567688,4.237982745766324,84.57465491532645,75.85589519650655,6.651698796463947,27.21876664181489,7.590005382236693,1.6350607519437643,3664,147,699,50,82,1201,364,916,0.172,0.706,0.122,-0.9954,0,2,1,0,0,2,87.0,1,0,14,7,47,47,8,3,33,1,85,7,1,8,5,161,146,60,10,21,56,6,12,6,1,10,3,4,2,2,45,36,2,5,28,5,6,16,29,17,0,0,13,22,139,31,105,111,17,90,0,1,6,2,58,36,2,14,41,534,184,10,0.0,0.0,0.043233480365322936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04588469884260318,0.09777924808356636,0.03542921040303812,0.1474550683941994,0.0,0.0,0.060255317939931836,0.0,0.0,0.050049945372236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036457714854499126,0.07887838673625643,0.041417461671512563,0.10080245034337312,0.0,0.06813277027169623,0.036991276943866336,0.2700678701629798,0.0,0.0,0.049914475106538785,0.0,0.07836506598349886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04517001070209875,0.0,0.0,0.03816323800616928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074491530687572,0.0,0.0,0.028571864508243436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919593434022867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03876998222351274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045776993510099416,0.0,0.02926181055691675,0.0,0.07465462373355228,0.0,0.03981681156307852,0.0,0.08353012764363611,0.0498533570360738,0.24641102340712265,0.09495053054613734,0.04253796848516525,0.0,0.040492273457006116,0.0,0.05357154083597829,0.0,0.034228501235273004,0.0,0.04629313120289573,0.0,0.22660649308160224,0.03715937749641044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03917712630605015,0.0,0.0,0.08748037049845835,0.0,0.04709217322470168,0.0,0.0,0.08908639607151203,0.0,0.044439668389524165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039378672386181264,0.0,0.0,0.024347850794358132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060593824449993,0.03129262270802671,0.12986567781101482,0.08880678367858752,0.1173614706000412,0.1176206720502008,0.11161045556514687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04192070860492585,0.0591453888725163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04699863747163864,0.044733548751121434,0.15566192986702862,0.0,0.0,0.06513582080753158,0.0,0.03416931793097111,0.04278825514519058,0.0,0.0,0.04340767730912711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03369453943525978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685706835552671,0.03868379883913206,0.09257471769736986,0.0,0.1256423809984334,0.09989028244948203,0.042430168009740685,0.0,0.0,0.12717638433981054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863027150469845,0.0,0.02838173021758645,0.0,0.04374401258657774,0.09512999911408752,0.0,0.03783464520640063,0.0,0.10569492134194404,0.0,0.04483714968408289,0.035303871965518215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261373726810694,0.034106726779157354,0.043816944906583874,0.0,0.03135799525540479,0.0,0.07076110035334185,0.07407882879564386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538135536700547,0.05027468584965989,0.0,0.0,0.033310452717496906,0.3560919113738993,0.15489161179500038,0.040788385158207284,0.0,0.0,0.08829912621820099,0.11355067006944156,0.0,0.0703434995273486,0.15500112667426602,0.0,0.0,0.04233355523352717,0.0,0.0,0.048189101631703035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03826369419827382,0.04879365697944908,0.0,0.05226228754738863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03997669897557186,0.0,0.0,0.0854133048985763,0.09608974548279987,0.032253218439462286,0.0449919959913021,0.04514869140251634,0.15735842145191084,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stevemackactor,2020/03/14,"Stress Tips You Are Not Alone | Depression and Anxiety Depression, Anxiety & Stress Playlist;https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLzyvMrK6TMPMlXznxZzohr9Ety2XTPxDs
SUBSCRIBE;https://www.youtube.com/SteveMack
 [CLICK BELL TO BE NOTIFIED OF NEW VIDEOS!",21.08488095238095,28.277932964285725,8.700000000000003,49.311666666666696,40.785714285714285,15.161904761904767,45.04761904761904,12.45797560212912,8.510533333333335,225,10,20,8,3,49,25,28,0.281,0.484,0.23399999999999999,-0.1421,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794463600818292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923438037407134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4128145748362175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4647815170800884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605884413798137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6181429969304771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Slushypupp,2020/03/14,"I just feel so alone This past year has been hurting me mentally immensely. Sure it has had some good and bad moments but mostly I have felt completely empty. My friends are always too busy with other friends or girlfriends to do much so I often find myself playing video games by myself in my room. I’m not sure where to turn to talk to anyone because I don’t feel close enough to my friends anymore and my parents are always busy with work and my other siblings. I just feel so numb like I can’t laugh or cry anymore. I can’t sleep that well so I probably only get about 5-6 hours of sleep a night on weekdays. I do good in school but I’ve lost pretty much all motivation and I just don’t want to try. Everything feels hopeless and I just want to give up. I have tried working out, being more social and taking to different people but nothing seems to work for me. All I want is to have emotion again and to not feel no one likes me enough to pay attention to me.",3.320151515151516,4.6159490959596,4.1590101010101,88.75518181818182,73.1919191919192,6.896161616161617,25.826262626262626,7.3011,1.1090602020202025,763,25,160,8,15,245,117,198,0.121,0.652,0.22699999999999998,0.9762,2,1,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,5,14,17,0,0,1,0,17,3,2,1,4,42,33,16,0,3,11,1,6,2,4,0,1,0,1,0,5,11,0,0,10,3,1,0,7,5,1,1,4,6,24,12,24,28,9,14,0,3,0,0,9,8,0,6,8,109,29,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918180624998495,0.0,0.0,0.19150132653391874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282446799039595,0.08046231294299303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608185981096642,0.07014795212347583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120652744486732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640322300831036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022768315535745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944259502199654,0.0,0.23780410066293736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342095820397804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909239858556544,0.0,0.11048894394311136,0.0,0.10517541602111384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667173178869385,0.0,0.060121338190040924,0.1103893245146998,0.0,0.19303697488955707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133245643918855,0.0,0.12318893861716695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243854299874376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256167029972498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159673771921308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16918504362524325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798901481804762,0.0,0.11041646458624944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797702027341323,0.0875188498987603,0.0,0.0,0.12777589461228875,0.0,0.1098510126448892,0.07977771985164643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707147731586642,0.12406907543760745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646088175887374,0.0,0.10475891302076497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303139139888516,0.11730330055748132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21691148739921576,0.0,0.08652121561251093,0.09249200334545148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562551837710626,0.12516730672530724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20362061817230284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034652127932556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513254044126807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741037878659098
mentalhealth,suckmyteas,2020/03/14,"I finally exercised I finally exercised for the first time in years at the end of 2019. I have a thyroid disease. My doctor said I needed to gain weight (muscle mass).  It wasnt a problem with my eating.

At first it was kinda like a chore. I went cause I bought the membership and felt like I had to. I guilted myself into it. And then I could tell that it was relieving  this tension nestled somewhere inside me. If I didnt go I felt more frustrated than normal. If I had a bad day I could vent it off at the gym, and the thoughts I had laying in bed at night lessened. I wanted to go out more. I wanted to hang out with friends. If I missed a few days I just wanted to lay in bed and not do anything.

I thought I was always going to be miserable and mope around. But the one thing I thought was stupid and that I never needed to do filled a need I didnt know I had.

Obviously it hasn't solved everything. Bad days are still bad days. It put stress on my insecurities. But feeling like I'm improving even a little bit has made all the difference. 

This is my first post, but I just really wanted to share. It's so hard to try but sometimes it's  so worth it.",1.3397113476456788,3.2602703029045657,3.283243730831681,90.18628720909258,80.41078838174273,6.514955800108244,22.096518130976005,7.586124646067393,0.8349320223705567,897,28,197,14,23,302,130,241,0.105,0.789,0.106,0.0494,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,4,7,18,2,5,14,0,21,6,0,2,3,46,44,16,0,14,10,0,5,3,1,0,4,1,3,0,15,12,2,0,7,3,2,7,6,12,0,4,20,6,31,6,27,21,5,39,0,2,0,0,4,15,0,4,19,138,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09276534984930744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917435449324154,0.09924624796994286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792586610503003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171392514570215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452691481615596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17802512697515702,0.0,0.0,0.2875971953564645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164792254063369,0.0,0.11411072735027725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407809277084716,0.0,0.0,0.09874357640494873,0.0,0.0,0.07363550464823014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019650039179603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05637071202778263,0.07964567810756268,0.21408824105555926,0.2442551033443629,0.0,0.28449000908461125,0.0,0.0,0.08613386915718821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900803260524292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986962993280367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06126983417020939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633994024993466,0.11173834099635484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549082488696053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24799654792560366,0.08598493809666674,0.0,0.0,0.10462213417309052,0.10923268804737607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554585335562686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677284741589324,0.0,0.0,0.10667712241050016,0.0,0.11207430345534533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142083786294967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604879250771104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026258419875327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903292781298433,0.0,0.12770692841616074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974437482099568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740663979811746,0.0,0.0,0.26552248414415786,0.0650084300235137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569173044722008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26302951487827336,0.0,0.0,0.1357600113917564,0.0,0.1033487134540386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179338055731344
mentalhealth,edgierthanallofyou,2020/03/14,"taking antidepressants but am very emotional? i’ve been taking antidepressants for about 2 years now and my doctor upped my dosage about 2 months ago. instead of being “emotionless” like others describe it, i’m excessively emotional. i cry all the time about everything and i don’t know why. is this normal? has it happened to anyone else?",4.364714285714285,7.59866623333334,4.862857142857145,75.46500000000002,78.33333333333334,8.095238095238095,25.23809523809524,8.841846274778883,2.633809523809524,274,10,43,7,7,87,48,60,0.067,0.795,0.13699999999999998,0.5137,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,0,1,6,11,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,7,9,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,28,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20566872264838335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16223140597253588,0.2377284318908588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.254859347662886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23747882821564625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19382010307330705,0.5219749076323515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20852156547308565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20517151894828314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751025921554549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335159436140806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18519344180118108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273270126541969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3488952266439396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529074912241684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19143799916968648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20935889955996345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941108767149866
mentalhealth,88frostfromfire,2020/03/14,"How to not get depressed over COVID-19 chaos I'm in generally good mental and physical health but tend to feel anxious. I'm having a hard time looking on the bright side with COVID-19. It feels a bit like the orchestra on the Titanic. 

I am still working (with plans to potentially have to work from home... which will be a difficult transition for my type of work). But everything feels so chaotic. My university cancelled courses (I attend part time), my work sends multiple updates a day. Most of my biggest hobbies are cancelled. My summer holidays are likely cancelled. It feels weird to be worrying so much about work right now and how to carry on with work, considering almost all other aspects of life are essentially on hold.

I have plenty of people to talk to and feel ok... it's just really starting to get me down that it feels like me and everyone else is just white-knuckling it and we don't know for how long.

I am not scared of the virus's direct impact on me, but how can we budget out our mental energy when we have no idea how long this will last?",4.033382352941175,6.031208906862746,4.823333333333334,81.85500000000002,72.67647058823529,8.133333333333335,27.68627450980393,8.841846274778883,2.24576274509804,843,32,158,17,17,272,124,204,0.136,0.7609999999999999,0.10300000000000001,-0.759,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,4,0,0,7,13,10,0,1,8,1,16,2,0,5,1,37,30,16,0,0,7,0,7,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,9,12,0,1,8,2,1,2,4,4,0,0,0,9,16,6,30,26,5,26,0,1,2,0,6,12,0,2,15,106,25,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730028033706298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361840023127362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387907977371193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819870120093061,0.0,0.10949511877835473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619909119656808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214762060882108,0.11425440600323955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38567827380374203,0.09082023431279322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283821581840247,0.0,0.0,0.10662889459585508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388167452074123,0.0,0.0,0.13513106820886664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751970123931874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351198374465082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986619773805436,0.10362624842472523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979423212039445,0.186324887604315,0.0,0.0,0.22500847407981148,0.10675546169022007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562301496125742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345367225233664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13766718349149784,0.0,0.08813451501740306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144142135081135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856657639581213,0.0,0.0,0.12727725760622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998181875218109,0.0,0.1015245466880072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218063229932177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14825866229850632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5553039788716689,0.12910460619737546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MinorDebuff,2020/03/14,"Is this a problem? I don’t know the best way to describe it. I feel like I have two “phases” if you will. One is very energetic and talkative, another is very withdrawn. I transition through them sometimes through the course of the day, and sometimes after a certain event. For instance, during my extroverted phase, if I say something wrong, (embarrass myself) I start becoming much more withdrawn and contemplative and start pinching myself. I can’t tell whether or not this is something like Bipolar, a different mental illness, or nothing at all. That’s why I’m asking here.",5.372901833872707,7.930514359223302,5.484983818770228,76.12180151024813,70.45631067961166,8.072923408845739,36.687162891046384,8.841846274778883,3.6856955771305286,461,26,73,9,9,145,74,103,0.08199999999999999,0.779,0.139,0.7178,1,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,1,1,1,7,0,1,6,0,8,2,0,0,2,15,14,9,0,3,6,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,0,2,12,4,7,13,4,7,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,4,7,54,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993170568472455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17770057065245107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099301150195601,0.0,0.0,0.19947883776415615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258686126126266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19859474119012827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611093245861932,0.13579428241822047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104463837369688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572846752587188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19155747374928048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973179500007074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18238835376458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12880416351336654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188235234322173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116046130890656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926680953947586,0.3759909854399636,0.0,0.269081369379766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16613963467600107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856820340714037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136743370246789,0.0,0.15087787028722213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17151901478420428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078243126476452,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Darkpryomaniac,2020/03/14,"Can you want to die but not be depressed or something Yeah, so I want/wanted to die/ kill myself, but I don’t think I’m depressed or anything, so I’m just wondering if that’s possible, and no, I’m not going to kill myself or anything",4.236133333333335,4.061810880000003,5.778000000000002,83.32233333333336,70.2,8.266666666666667,30.66666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.9508666666666663,184,7,39,2,3,63,32,50,0.289,0.536,0.174,-0.8832,0,0,1,0,0,3,7.0,0,1,0,0,3,4,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,13,10,9,4,2,9,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,0,0,5,0,3,9,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35262038701117804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3690678848782545,0.0,0.4447171111686733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176369499201024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4740736413889799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24153564064949504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16494077103500632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13728329307344064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3791121056530389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323459065877869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gabageacct,2020/03/14,"I can't get help without ruining everything. I got a lot going on, I'm a whole mess. It's been getting worse since early summer last year. For the first time in my life i want to turn to drugs or alcohol or anything to cause some change. I can't get help because i know it'll ruin everything I've built. Everyone thinks I'm so good at handling myself, they won't listen when I try to tell them I need help. I have a therapist and what not, I was supposed to have a psychiatrist appointment this month but my work schedules me despite me asking for the day off. Im so close to letting it all go because if I get help I lose my ability to work, my independence, my place with my friends. But I can't do this anymore.",3.003581818181821,4.020104873333332,4.674848484848488,85.83409090909093,73.6,8.121212121212123,28.303030303030305,8.575989854853784,1.9376666666666664,561,22,122,10,11,190,97,150,0.125,0.79,0.085,-0.5474,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,4,3,6,0,0,6,0,11,3,0,2,1,19,27,9,0,3,7,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,0,0,6,3,1,0,2,0,0,2,6,4,0,1,3,1,23,2,15,21,4,18,0,3,0,0,10,6,0,5,10,75,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429769547432948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431855925184765,0.0,0.0,0.11881196387763315,0.0,0.13497527147979585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17602471335557934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14831743940326125,0.1527342863705104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311278415057113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16743429419494954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796072670190726,0.2595178329763698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280906414290825,0.0,0.0,0.1115471846927596,0.0,0.3017291596147432,0.0,0.16410830756123307,0.12109861066275834,0.11547341453823246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3870979375889511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595455335642494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793471554819703,0.11768850047626665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476377428586436,0.1019794568491353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161523644425452,0.0,0.12274622307258913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524227863108315,0.0,0.0,0.10705551333564467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084576829538518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943215135763975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619398019720449,0.0,0.0,0.16763563909524368,0.0,0.0925125049966388,0.0,0.0,0.08418880309655813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098024151457801,0.15704335351821802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515872490944858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16119447060577116,0.0,0.13917661236832252,0.0,0.21021988017956653,0.0,0.147134967549295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297561527312266
mentalhealth,HereComesNancyDrew,2020/03/14,"Self Esteem I look into my mirror and the girl staring back mocks me with her smile, plastered on like it's frozen on my face. The more depressed I get, the more I try to be funny so that someone will laugh and for a moment I'll feel like I'm interesting. 

I pick apart my insecurities; trauma, acne, weight, bone structure, assault, death. Every puzzle piece fuzes together to make me into a mural of murky grays. Dull, lifeless, a melancholy puddle of watered down dreams. 

Since I quit my job, I've done nothing but spiral into my darkest emotions. It was meant to be a relief to get away from that awful place, but now I'll be stuck living in the house where I was abused and broken for even longer than expected. 

My husband, that dearest man, tells me it'll be alright. But living off of one check is hard, even without rent, and I hate leaving it all on him. I'm hateful to him - I never used to be before we moved in here - and he always seems to be offended, even when I'm just trying to tell him what's going on with me.

 He always has to flip it around to be about him. Some days I want to run away and never look back. Other days I want to let myself fall apart and be too lazy to put myself back together. 

This is all in my mind - trust me, it actually is, when I'm not depressed (aka thinking rationally) I see how he's the most wonderful man in the world. He's the best thing I have. 

But then, I wish I had one more thing. 

Self esteem.",4.6305122410546105,4.697440844067796,5.521666666666667,84.6653625235405,69.37288135593221,7.775894538606403,26.21939736346517,7.1686216300943375,1.114578154425612,1119,29,236,9,18,368,166,295,0.158,0.6890000000000001,0.153,-0.19,2,0,0,0,1,0,42.0,1,0,0,2,17,18,5,1,11,2,20,4,2,4,4,42,43,16,1,4,7,1,3,2,0,2,0,0,1,5,14,14,2,0,5,1,2,5,4,10,0,2,6,8,34,8,40,26,9,38,0,3,5,0,18,21,0,5,14,159,48,1,0.0,0.1335220001761627,0.10997147178058653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875381157819496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032007841799877,0.0,0.0,0.2117563337838816,0.2599603696008522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589288465017133,0.0,0.1182636625732648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14535447828564216,0.0,0.19412350169616666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11532339396577727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12676371914348875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22329669136398728,0.0,0.09494816028956228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569806352056579,0.08050743314573665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775419717996165,0.0,0.06404565615106361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095020528604423,0.22252071807160892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13003183473363425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182976281043808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932492091743108,0.0,0.11523555698745745,0.0,0.11011157403923924,0.0,0.1990188089286569,0.0,0.18926637351247128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522301476060171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11378714257007275,0.0,0.0,0.11977412738710234,0.0,0.0,0.17383056607312353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081313434982494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15272649773291944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773951424713187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328693166000507,0.0,0.1198621795306834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980120792485327,0.102590877644911,0.23512538437744135,0.0,0.0,0.09322027157435768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548385745984116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19699615172811702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497355719857632,0.07220870378518164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15302140865534453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733000284015024,0.0,0.0,0.13293772862238587,0.0,0.0,0.1372289156258493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959063418418892,0.1086313982817175,0.12221004004851342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lordant1,2020/03/14,"Scared. Hi I’m 24 M workout do martial arts etc. Lately I’ve been feeling very frightened over everything whether it be on the road I’m afraid someone is riding my ass causing them road rage, at bars I feel like I will be in conflict, I avoid conversations with strangers and idk why. I used to go out every weekend, party with friends, just have fun. This is really annoying me and idk what it is or how to over come it it’s just like a foggy cloud over my head 24/7. I know this is a rant I’m just confused.",0.7158176100628957,2.982339292452835,2.2153773584905667,94.91256289308176,85.32075471698113,5.042767295597487,22.98427672955975,6.42735559955562,0.4527823899371071,399,15,88,4,12,129,76,106,0.235,0.634,0.13,-0.8906,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,4,10,2,4,3,0,10,3,2,3,0,20,19,5,0,0,5,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,7,6,1,2,3,4,0,3,0,6,0,0,1,2,9,4,11,15,1,14,0,0,0,1,4,9,1,2,4,49,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26554438142520825,0.0,0.22266955651327056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882889639010048,0.0,0.0,0.21779221086701195,0.0,0.23231759766008125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26140450705312224,0.1846680525727433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19971170132209687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14690800755938369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652892576522839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14206145551786226,0.0,0.29159231328856866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25257406861719783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165597774476255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587974307354234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21902099371772166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22325568433977505,0.0,0.21328449154432708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23325048651050306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Biomutt93,2020/03/14,"Heyyy I could use a 3rd party perspective on my... Life... So uh. I'm a 26 year old male. Raging drug addiction/mental health problems my whole life. I'm an otherwise intelligent person despite evidence to the contrary.... I'm so excited by all of the new innovation in technology and science that's going on but... I want to be a part of it.... I have many glaring problems that I don't know where to begin. I can't even find people who have been through similiar shit.... I'm a fairly attractive male but my addiction/psychological problems have crippled my life.... It's just so painful. Nobody wants to be around me anymore. I haven't had a girlfriend in years. I'm damaged cognitively from drug use. Just can't think straight. I feel really hopeless. Interpersonal relationships bring me nothing but heartache and terrible memories.... I hate my life so much... I have no appetite these days.... To summarize, I have a myriad of problems that I've tried to deal with my whole life and I'm honestly running out of hope.",2.7960483669907745,5.512223319371731,4.514210919970086,78.89757417102969,80.2041884816754,8.036000997257544,29.514086262777358,8.841846274778883,2.9390745948641244,798,39,145,21,21,268,114,191,0.205,0.7020000000000001,0.094,-0.978,0,0,2,0,0,2,50.0,0,0,0,0,9,15,3,0,9,0,14,10,1,2,1,26,32,10,0,8,5,0,1,0,1,0,9,0,0,3,7,6,0,0,4,0,0,3,5,11,1,0,2,1,18,4,20,27,5,17,0,2,0,0,7,8,1,1,6,88,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375747256450427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108895078810384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09963411702767136,0.0,0.0,0.08047878719663748,0.12865230841545974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894319841224914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242216828793167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309722918937187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405517682313805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092064576258188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12320361730675974,0.0,0.13264521069265545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394395078538575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685809462035383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44071193236572825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651678301484814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173450791311204,0.0,0.0,0.12052230190828825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973871717362446,0.0,0.1309453984747762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327846337244696,0.0,0.0,0.13513467185406292,0.0,0.08651320135876313,0.10896122000836964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4776261004956319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799432331689277,0.0,0.0,0.1339770275144294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12809444268983874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995995684773738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472375621962258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21555581028683865,0.0,0.0,0.14720794706002707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786456363753122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607204601237601
mentalhealth,Qaqhak,2020/03/14,"Am I a sociopath, or something else? I hate people. A lot. Most of the people I've ever known were fake. I can't trust anyone, not even my own family. Sometimes I'll get so mad I just want to kill everyone in sight. But I don't. It's normally the smallest things that set me off. 
My brother makes weird throat noises all the time like a ""retard"" and doesn't stop unless I threaten him. Then he just starts scream-crying. He always smells like piss and is extremely unhygenic. It's like I'm describing a baby, but he is 12. My mum is abusive when she's mad, and she doesn't even realise it. She says ""This is how I was raised, and this is how I'm going to raise you."" Which is ridiculous. My sister thinks the way she raises us is good, so she also treats me the same way she does. 
Whenever I'd get panic attacks, she (my mum) would either ignore me or do some other shit. She'd say ""just calm down"" ""shut up or I'm leaving"" or some other stuff. I often dissociate when I have panic attacks. 
I have pets. I have never wanted to hurt them. I love animals more than people. I've read somewhere that that is a trait of antisocial personality disorder, but I don't know if that is true or not. The thought of hurting an animal disturbs me, but the thought of hurting a person doesn't. 
I feel empathy. Hypothetically, if I were to hurt someone, I'd have to know nothing about them, or I would feel terrible. I sometimes have too much empathy, which isn't something I'd guess a sociopath would have. 
I've never attempted suicide, but I've made detailed plans before, even though I was never actually going to carry them out. My dad found a noose I tied, he didn't think much of it since we have a boat, and he just thought I was learning to tie knots.
I think I might have BPD, but I've never seen anyone about it so I wouldn't know.  I'm extremely paranoid. Our car got broken into once, and my head instantly came up with a bunch of theories as to why. I wouldn't go in the car for a while. I also like blood. A lot. I pick at scabs to watch the blood rush out. I don't know if that's bad or not. I've had debilitating anxiety for the past 3 years or so, so I couldn't really do harm to anyone. Are these things could be connected to something or is it just all random? I can't see a therapist at the moment.",1.7716059675296163,3.5721950524109047,3.7027360928282387,88.27369460289603,78.55974842767294,6.701360245721808,22.204134366925068,7.65591337171366,0.8699840963385501,1788,53,386,27,43,605,225,477,0.177,0.731,0.092,-0.9927,0,0,3,0,0,1,71.0,3,1,3,2,25,32,9,3,25,0,48,8,6,5,8,90,82,40,2,13,28,5,2,4,0,6,1,2,1,2,21,12,0,2,15,1,0,7,20,22,0,0,15,9,56,10,36,57,14,37,0,4,4,1,31,12,2,21,19,255,77,2,0.0,0.09643572427500466,0.07942645044829406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017764939212165,0.06772432258631908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062264343168721425,0.0,0.0,0.17073267542595671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851893661951484,0.0,0.0,0.06795857748148645,0.0,0.0,0.06925824786820173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250985769432766,0.0,0.0,0.09309029539094878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498456130075145,0.0,0.08940483918213478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328181297335786,0.0,0.07122632843658352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799222906453853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612751316748373,0.07362335243530166,0.0,0.07777315170195759,0.0,0.0,0.07672874688974148,0.0,0.08230806636296105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924167680703632,0.0,0.0,0.08504749237196205,0.0,0.1387701479032748,0.06826740365264257,0.06509628936523157,0.0,0.08966201197409672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035734405235764,0.08353125227403782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485255196494979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004773458529593,0.0,0.17892275600293076,0.0,0.0,0.08618194123476339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15905527747524806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383924375593308,0.07345908723973303,0.07701468992621656,0.054329517989673295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634361422525183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966436659880796,0.0,0.25109684573746305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974647661339561,0.07809742524321941,0.0,0.0,0.08667938645525695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909909868992801,0.0,0.0,0.0776974818028594,0.16928003995242094,0.14213599301676985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141361519362146,0.0,0.05214153636754388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294517175371916,0.0,0.0,0.06485855900584064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354729696607394,0.06732796389003412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896282963528416,0.1879776660301735,0.16099672633387446,0.0,0.057609385949620964,0.0,0.0,0.06804701327404822,0.0,0.0,0.09317389718009082,0.08902918849458089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450190863505188,0.10814591089953636,0.1564573322590123,0.07996682341013357,0.19384749153979489,0.047460090355876144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979040606546424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601373650978684,0.1292097105149791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344324984801416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17345474976976602,0.0,0.0,0.0524135150929112
mentalhealth,taylormcnugget,2020/03/14,"Advice on rolling panic attacks? Also kinda venting. 25F, diagnosed with GAD and depression. I feel awful every day and night! It's like I'm laying in bed and I cannot stop thinking about the worse negative things, like the time in 10th grade I got in trouble for being on my phone or something ridiculous! I cannot stop the thoughts no matter what I take (wellbutrin and Atarax). I start to get pain in my chest and start pulling the skin off my lip, that feeling comes in waves all night and day. I get so moody, one minute I'm really happy and excited and nice to be around, next I'm really quiet and standoff ish because I feel like everyone hates me, or I  just crying for whatever reason. 

What triggered me to write this post was today at work I was all over the place. It felt like I had drank the entire pitcher of coffee. I couldn't get sentences out without my words getting mixed up, couldn't even say ""thank you have a great day"". It was like this for hours I was texting my boyfriend non stop all day about it! I probably sent him like 5 texts in a min. It was like I couldn't get off my phone couldn't concentrate on any work or stay still. And felt super weird talking to anybody.

Get home and still feel pretty weird, as soon as we pulled in our driveway I started crying uncontrollably for maybe 30 mins. I've been to several doctors and a therapist and all have just prescribed wellbutrin, Atarax, and Ativan if I can't sleep but is addictive and I have a addictive personality so I try not take it. :(

Does anyone else ever feel like this? Does it ever end? Like has anyone gone through this and felt better? I just want to know what it's like to be able to fully clear your mind, I seriously feel so alone and like I'm losing it. Thanks",2.6741851719197705,4.7698582406876815,3.438795666189112,89.8333510924069,76.90830945558739,6.310924068767909,23.227166905444125,7.292943589461545,0.8468631088825216,1382,43,282,17,32,437,190,349,0.11900000000000001,0.7090000000000001,0.172,0.9653,0,1,1,0,0,0,38.0,2,2,0,5,16,32,3,2,10,1,22,10,4,2,7,66,58,28,0,6,10,0,10,11,0,0,5,2,3,1,18,22,1,3,13,1,0,5,11,13,0,1,15,12,34,19,37,36,4,49,0,2,0,0,12,18,0,5,35,164,52,4,0.07997121284966288,0.0,0.0,0.17436085240099256,0.0,0.0781469436446548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282605845635993,0.0,0.063952950023072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05438316706751005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183546289559794,0.08193995812518458,0.0,0.07119133431790757,0.0,0.09097879963562676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04874970908719283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072803897384743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888811873486897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17568924431299154,0.2062992657386445,0.0,0.06887908844444854,0.08116909766160199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185392502206716,0.13996669456246658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06680568665399261,0.0,0.07083075787126507,0.0,0.0,0.05282023186073104,0.14467708092172135,0.06737919595596888,0.07641592096888956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24261508849727514,0.11426290087760607,0.23035471648965986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506899481431652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06396028442520088,0.0881685444899357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851308431371266,0.0,0.07895501619770756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021764694234958,0.0,0.07875553568282173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0439500871542786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4297688460598983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894673313347495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034183216906833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074812774799521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505029211924563,0.15009513172175912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541905634981875,0.0,0.08509500886178073,0.09382898751869828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982777842684967,0.08355289642289354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659031582495568,0.08135947363809645,0.08622249333314749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246321346286456,0.08222372599614522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359631826750348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034470761938332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002896710317346,0.0,0.0,0.06156574669163323,0.0,0.0,0.16981210819369502,0.08523867238929222,0.12773022776953544,0.2005785444485632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025679904541735,0.06427783163285605,0.0,0.1472534966413451,0.0,0.09285274189915048,0.05312932033458748,0.05124232409801752,0.0,0.0634882101314731,0.04663185732409637,0.0,0.07580335899299967,0.0,0.0,0.054295204076641235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716909332141018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708939540768947,0.0,0.11643999081420545,0.0,0.0814974980256582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kitzah,2020/03/14,"Project Illumi-Nations Hello everyone,

My name is Kit Williamson and I recently started Project Illumi-Nations, a youtube channel that I try my hardest to update on a weekly basis.  I started the project in order to help shine a light on the stigma there is surrounding mental health and to help others realize they are not alone in the world, and that it is okay to talk about mental health.  I am doing this by sharing stories and experiences that are shared to me through anonymous submission, videos, music, however you feel comfortable sharing.  And I don't want to just hear about the dark times, but the good times, and how you deal with it.  I want to build something to help others.  I want to show the world that yes, we are not okay, and you know what? It's okay to not be okay.  It's okay to deal with mental health issues.  I want to shine a light on the world, and I hope you will join me for this journey.  For those interested, the Project Illuminations channel can be found here:  [https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCaiBuAbsYOl1HlOmllnEwAg](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCaiBuAbsYOl1HlOmllnEwAg)   


Thank you for your time, and may we all shine a light on the world.",8.280712669683258,9.608922750000003,6.552549019607843,76.03377828054302,61.69607843137255,8.825942684766215,30.888386123680238,8.841846274778883,2.323949924585218,947,31,164,13,13,277,104,204,0.024,0.753,0.223,0.9905,1,1,1,0,0,0,44.0,2,6,1,0,6,13,0,0,14,6,14,3,0,1,1,31,26,11,0,5,5,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,14,13,0,0,4,4,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,8,22,13,27,21,1,21,0,0,3,0,21,11,0,2,8,109,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448107523155786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28829536618766416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360344812524386,0.0,0.13677022250035314,0.0,0.0,0.07069690011248574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330477776688256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117273896234828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4458645172481451,0.15758664867873207,0.0,0.28115403089932034,0.0,0.0,0.1388722329141074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14593514878470795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684109691758037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4227152699808757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805480981130222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763982086607636,0.0,0.0,0.1979298109646649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123815539389976,0.0,0.12872693707239502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24458948548902956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949282085372801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3298764672480993,0.0,0.11215470535426786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ishbu69,2020/03/14,"question about grief Hi,

When I was 23 i lost my older brother and at 26 one of my parents. I'm 30 now and it messed me up.. no doubt. But the most frustrating thing is that nearly all of my memories growing together have disappeared. It's as if my brain wiped them from my memory and I can barely think back and remember anything.. I wish more than anything that I could.

Is there a name for this, is it a common thing? I am sure its like a subconscious reaction to an insane amount of trauma but I am wondering if it can be fixed.

Thanks for any input",1.6710539018503638,3.7457066283185863,3.453531777956556,88.5993322606597,80.06194690265488,7.294931617055512,22.662107803700728,8.296473431620573,1.3572902654867254,431,14,91,9,11,144,82,113,0.142,0.7659999999999999,0.092,-0.3912,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,5,9,1,1,5,0,11,1,1,0,2,19,17,10,1,4,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,6,0,1,2,0,14,3,13,13,4,10,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,6,6,70,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156015577501215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3910104065480608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182681651260254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652139270931205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18968549047675665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606786949433545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593427965347503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16098797389704342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26380056989082096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266140033700013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691278432881862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22391302430480312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187285068030168,0.0,0.0,0.3156705183727533,0.15222941785042332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732012315221013,0.0,0.2576415622610849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SuperRemeo,2020/03/14,"I feel like I might have depersonalization disorder I'm an 18 year old male, and only recently I have been feeling kind of out of touch with reality
 It is hard to explain, but sometimes I feel like I'm dreaming, so I double check to see if I am, if I have conversations with people, I will forget who I am talking to, and when I realize it, I'll double check once again. Sometimes I even feel like I'm inside someone else's mind and body. I used to have this feeling when I was younger, but it wasn't as common and intense, after a while it stopped, but suddenly it's been happening much more often and it's a weirder feeling than before. I just now looked it up and it took me a bit but I found that it could be depersonalization disorder. So I ask, are these signs that I do indeed have this disorder? Or is it something my mind would naturally go through? Or something else.. I really don't know.",3.8665384615384615,4.9267785109890125,5.495274725274726,80.59972527472529,71.58241758241758,8.457142857142857,29.384615384615394,8.841846274778883,2.2381076923076932,707,28,145,13,13,241,102,182,0.1,0.815,0.085,-0.5439,0,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,4,0,21,1,1,1,0,38,40,20,0,4,9,0,8,3,0,3,0,0,0,1,16,9,0,1,10,1,2,2,2,0,0,0,6,10,20,4,14,29,5,16,0,0,2,0,6,2,0,6,15,103,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176312906459564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706953765874648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737053134422622,0.13976546821687014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046264737549716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4326260435883481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21022468094143384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310756872903953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817315720073449,0.26967257298973313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796284731031494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151040265564876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126842991322383,0.0,0.11271630680382275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310294922976977,0.06915124678839177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18441819796538647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10566301754429344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348259794957062,0.2540988685642963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249734724984014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320343049636485,0.13400168381344796,0.0,0.09569712873584547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723262172351019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060801945659435,0.0,0.12423901540376997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026785458365936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10661283691063284,0.1937355950280652,0.2488923064577557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10519703392115427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113500304705557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979846366797966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086741570288213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893839142350446,0.0,0.0,0.08102848398283402
mentalhealth,backwardsparadigm,2020/03/14,"How to best support partner? (auditory hallucinations/trauma) I've recently started dating someone with some long-term mental health difficulties. One of the things she deals with is auditory hallucinations – voices telling her to hurt herself, to not take her meds, to not trust the doctors, etc.

She was recently been admitted to inpatient care again and is struggling a lot. When she's in her ""normal"" mental state (I don't know the right terminology, please forgive me if I say something wrong!), she says she wants to take her meds and knows that it's the right thing to do. But when the voices start to get bad, she becomes very upset and resistant to taking her meds.

She sometimes calls me on the phone when this happens (which is often when its time to take her night meds). She'll say she doesn't trust the staff to give her the right meds, and so forth. I try to be reassuring that they'll take care of her and that I'd always stand up for her, but she can't bring herself to trust them.

I'm just not sure what I can do to help when she's in this state. It doesn't feel useful to be argumentative, but I also really worry about her not taking her meds. I also really really don't want to do anything that could lose her trust; I don't know who else she could turn to if she didn't feel safe talking to me.

If anyone has any advice for how I could best support her, I would really appreciate it! I want to be the most supportive and helpful partner I can be; I just don't feel like I know how to.",6.013729411764707,5.767594420000003,6.5143529411764725,79.78923529411767,66.46666666666667,9.592156862745098,28.98039215686275,9.168548406835145,2.100521568627451,1186,34,245,19,17,387,143,300,0.14800000000000002,0.731,0.121,-0.7828,0,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,2,3,16,22,0,2,10,0,29,2,0,4,1,47,60,23,0,11,12,0,3,1,2,3,2,5,0,2,15,8,0,1,9,0,0,1,12,6,0,1,3,8,46,16,31,47,6,24,0,2,0,0,47,7,0,7,14,167,61,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512295287796589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295642611017865,0.06396751442994332,0.0,0.0,0.05227874445792922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05375392700829035,0.0,0.063262915990202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418877472188357,0.0,0.08490419769475463,0.0,0.0,0.16135456007223875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849963432121,0.0,0.15676169522570907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18413920009747367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925642965497065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868648811487973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422055958206774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573776361675467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661340169322774,0.05492067967084989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04016486609076074,0.0737470683531276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679817498197182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171626253593046,0.0,0.0,0.10305756889471136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229802217278435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16899754090378666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03755803811875958,0.0,0.0,0.06803339818307055,0.0,0.08600528443619387,0.0,0.06535776149911489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5123556304963638,0.0,0.15494712247074496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721435092766871,0.07532277472399564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05209359391732538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438745387263283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969965502860003,0.0,0.15181279487117905,0.0,0.0,0.19695666533934544,0.0,0.1834061447935552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513731893297521,0.059183385451936285,0.07603295257630345,0.0,0.10882734847101984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803681451450882,0.0,0.0,0.26171606531299096,0.07245531376396086,0.0,0.3468099490502016,0.06179052297694247,0.06719356289663916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021468336901892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0448273810463953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05219418530168005,0.08361969751358457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06639672511568424,0.0,0.06343127073510389,0.13603148413558122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807194921537973,0.0,0.054610952092816266,0.08405252636177561,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,b-mac-95,2020/03/14,"I've realised I'm not coping with my mother's recent death and my relationship breakdown as well as i thought I was. I (24f) have suffered from mental illness my whole life, I have been battling it for a good 10 years actively, I can easily say the past 6 months have been the hardest I have ever been through, my mother passed in October and I found out my partner of 6 years had been cheating on me for months with a close friend about 2 weeks later. 

I think my relationship breakdown stopped my grieving process with my mother and honestly I was incredibly numb. I have had quite a rollercoaster ride since but i thought i was getting better. I had started seeing a new girl, I started enjoying my job again and even know my dad has been diagnosed with a pretty severe case of dementia at 51 I had been enjoying living with him knowing I can take extra care of him which give me a sense of security. 

In the past week the girl i was seeing and I called things off and again I thought I was handling it quite well, i feel i probably moved too hard and too fast because loneliness terrifies me and now I've noticed I'm really going backwards.. yesterday i made an attempt on my life. This is big for me as it is something I have always told myself is not the answer to anything. I have a very very good understanding of mental health i know practices to control anxiety and panic attacks that i get quite often it seems someday it boils over and I lose control.

I know I need to continue to be happy with myself and grown but I feel stagnant, ironically the one person I want to speak to and get guidance from is my mum and the cycle starts again. 

Hell of a vent. Not really sure of the point but I'm scared and alone and my friends think I'm too happy to be depressed.",4.173418803418805,5.543701341880343,5.1057692307692335,82.50173076923079,71.19373219373219,8.021082621082622,29.45441595441596,8.502166056373571,2.185419373219374,1405,56,272,23,26,459,177,351,0.165,0.684,0.151,-0.5048,1,1,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,8,13,26,4,2,17,0,31,7,0,3,2,53,65,21,2,2,6,5,3,0,3,0,6,2,0,4,9,23,1,4,15,0,0,5,3,11,2,1,21,7,53,15,38,42,2,40,1,4,2,0,20,12,1,2,23,184,62,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576499472863044,0.0,0.0,0.07693759686600145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073483721798318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609013372486907,0.0,0.0,0.10519134231304128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636530001264125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177704463705253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441625602239516,0.0,0.09427338406681056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20741285882938346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963925441738783,0.09384918653091033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06107171245355252,0.08363913573843625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350532551406916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138219020315097,0.1428751772615481,0.0,0.14492613804084395,0.08870005760840395,0.05254951883699525,0.15510911828231785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19685965736414412,0.08282973480301238,0.0,0.0,0.09828508924277934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175642159841052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20326355946878472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062035599095087,0.0,0.0,0.08164755642478598,0.0,0.0,0.10344375518208697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749183365771046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18636427177825068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760803719781793,0.09827477992367603,0.0,0.06856101069151001,0.0,0.08930247188681342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527107077073183,0.0,0.0,0.06265611480811631,0.0,0.0,0.10848678136549553,0.0,0.0,0.17653502624061568,0.0,0.08073614702409829,0.0,0.0,0.08740852802427686,0.0,0.0,0.0940693026963446,0.09969201448706884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950410803615297,0.0,0.0,0.11846983038942742,0.0,0.09129721324166586,0.19854383037241627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353121948760465,0.09257276500669843,0.0,0.14736394475532702,0.0841759079583666,0.0,0.10445819359481492,0.0,0.07648731719653352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118343571178029,0.0,0.0,0.19633984701318505,0.0,0.0,0.07730418666855393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714638626886859,0.0,0.06952154878125835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061429086166864474,0.1184946136176449,0.0,0.22021866868532045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883534772166528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625846223913076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258524830945014,0.05453776332552582,0.0,0.14833836017419974,0.0,0.16627278725680505,0.0,0.0,0.10323294408915663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908778827307458
mentalhealth,Dthickey,2020/03/14,"Just got laid off. Fuck. every second i just keep hearing the words and just bumming myself out. this sucks so much and i had done so much for my company just to be thrown out like nothing. i fucking hate this so damn much and i don’t want to get politics involved but some stupid fucking orange asshole just has to go and fuck everything up as usual. im sorry im so bummed out and i at this point want to give up. what’s the use all these reddit news threads aren’t helping, it’s friday the 13th and im about ready to just fuck it all. later.",-0.5592122762148328,1.6575665826086947,1.208235294117646,98.44882352941177,96.21739130434784,3.749360613810742,17.199488491048594,5.5289334501034215,-0.5870716112531964,427,12,95,3,17,138,72,115,0.175,0.7240000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.9047,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,11,10,9,0,3,0,6,5,0,1,2,25,22,12,0,2,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,9,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,9,0,1,3,1,7,1,15,18,6,11,0,0,0,5,4,8,7,1,3,62,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14247147549380249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11729974315437088,0.0,0.12512290695468375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6435381085408319,0.0727372549527801,0.133553521645015,0.0791225337464361,0.0,0.11134779554299426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745196850957458,0.0,0.0,0.15691224694471087,0.0,0.09331693832327603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4511478886435988,0.0,0.0,0.12374607025400353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801637500787959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070304825917456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358635681407766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316088969297707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558465725606427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024229115705015,0.15333232276889844,0.0,0.16423237033109248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoseGoddess333,2020/03/14,Help I’ve recently began cutting again. I feel really bad because I just got out of a mental hospital for the same reason on 12/5/19 and it’s 3/13/20 when I’m posting this. It was just today tho. And I’m hoping I don’t do it again. I want to get better but it’s hard and I was in a very bad place today and I felt it was ok to post about it here. I just really wanted to tell someone about it. Thanks for listening.,-0.8686630036630021,1.2324307692307706,2.0202472527472537,94.08516941391943,92.95604395604396,5.231135531135532,17.473443223443226,6.816661863887847,0.07974652014652063,324,9,74,5,12,113,57,91,0.11599999999999999,0.7340000000000001,0.15,0.2649,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,1,0,3,1,5,0,0,1,0,16,17,7,0,3,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,6,4,7,4,11,11,1,13,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,7,48,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32929844124515506,0.12020797336899515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744025633097184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09970749447562233,0.0,0.18933770165810826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302601859760023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577145035492689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766475926346244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217535676052464,0.0,0.0,0.1958586921642871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19872573563724352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20602634428323613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37771575738194224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526557689445062,0.20274885019654024,0.19470583808755232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16708231061002438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17235673697965134,0.18155025675224504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738347706983452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270616373167773,0.2326209210265556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Scarce3,2020/03/15,"Concerned about my friend’s mental health My(17m) friend’s(17f) really close friend recently killed himself and she hasn’t been the same since. She just seems kinda out of it and she’s been drinking more. I tried reaching out last night and said I would be there for her and she accepted my help, but I don’t expect her to reach out bc of our history. I liked her a few times and even asked her out on a few dates. She rejected me and even stood me up on one occasion. I’m still concerned for her and really want to help her. What should I do?",2.9401801801801817,4.525056891891894,3.35873873873874,92.9490990990991,74.67567567567569,7.455855855855856,22.243243243243235,8.167268648758528,0.8646108108108108,429,11,96,7,9,133,71,111,0.064,0.7809999999999999,0.155,0.7405,0,1,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,3,0,8,2,0,0,0,22,14,8,1,4,2,0,0,1,2,2,1,1,0,0,2,12,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,1,22,4,14,7,4,14,0,1,0,0,19,8,0,2,7,67,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19208943171705548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20128522500573634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714258350968132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.476243575931099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21840809233550806,0.0,0.0,0.2754483174402661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273253288145064,0.0,0.0,0.16748784372330322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038368377133916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20706836302524007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928224045805088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13923375980859293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632624119692395,0.0,0.20287970772865987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19545178786322054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18705481797328502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699693123897029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16409092935668765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198129047377219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13950261660258334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211932444681442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14596205818851954,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VerucaMoon,2020/03/15,"Never ending cycle in my head Trigger warning:
- suicidal thoughts
- self harm
- eating disorders

This is very long but please bare with me. Please help me help myself. I am 27F. 

To start with, I think my main problem is that I don’t feel like I have a right to say I have a problem. I am terrified that all these years of inner torture are actually all just bullshit. I feel as though, although I might feel anxious and depressed sometimes, and although I’ve self harmed in the past and fantasised about suicide, what if I’m actually just full of shit and I make this stuff up because I don’t have the back bone to actually face my problems and instead id prefer to be diagnosed with some mental illness that takes away some of the responsibility I’ve probably just been avoiding all along? 

This fear has stopped me seeking help in the past many times. This starts a cycle that sort of sounds like this: 
“I don’t have a problem, I just don’t want to be held accountable for my actions and I use the possibility of being mentally unstable to justify why I say and do shitty things sometimes.”
Then, this turns into a self pity party where I cry, yell, sometimes I break things, sometimes will have a full blown anxiety attack at the realisation this might be the truth. 
THEN this turns into a desperation, and I start frantically thinking HEY hang on these are total symptoms of a real mental illness, I should see a doctor. 
I book a doctors appointment and I go, knowing in the back of my mind I’m probably full of shit. I tell the doctor about my anxiety, fear, extremely low self worth and they put me on a medication and send me to a therapist. 
I take the meds and see the therapist (for a little while) and then I just decide one day that, because they don’t seem to be treating my issues with any urgency or I don’t feel like they really care, I start to read into their body language and conclude they would rather be dealing with someone with real issues and someone who really needs the help - not someone with just a fucking inferiority complex. 
I proceed to cancel all my appointments and stop the medication immediately and say “fuck it, none of this is actually real, I don’t actually even need to be here because I’m full of shit.”

Then I’ll push the experience out of my mind. Then I go to hang out with friends/go into public/get out more, and I start to compare myself to every single person around me and wonder why i can’t be more this, that, more like other people. Then I’ll have ONE tiny encounter with one person who doesn’t take my or my self esteem seriously, and that’s it. It would only take something so little for someone to say or look at me differently, but it hits a nerve when it does. They have ‘crossed a line’ and I will ‘make them pay’, usually I decide the best way is to kill myself out of spite to make them feel bad.

Then I start to plan out how I would do it, who will look after the cat, who will care? Would my family be okay if I did? Then I realise I’m a coward and would never have the guts to kill myself, and that none of this is real or legitimate and that I’m once again, full of absolute shit. - although if I don’t decide I want to kill myself out of spite for the other person, I decide that I need to go out of my way to make their life difficult as pay back, which I have never followed through with either. As soon as they say something nice again I’ll reconsider everything I thought before and change my mind again and they’re not so bad.

Then I realise, yet again, that these are the thoughts of someone who’s possibly mentally unstable. And so I book ANOTHER doctors appointment, and the cycle. fucking. starts. again. This has happened 4 times now with 4 different doctors and 4 different therapists, but the 5th time I tried my doctor didn’t even follow up with the referral which reinforced my belief that she too, thinks I’m full of shit.

Obviously a lot has happened outside of this too. I’ve seen one good therapist but I didn’t feel it got deep enough. She helped me figure out that I have an “a-typical eating disorder”. I was supposed to get help for this but alas, I decided that was all bullshit, it wasn’t real and I didn’t actually need help.

Objectively, I have been trying for years (because my doctors don’t or won’t) to diagnose myself (pffff, I know) with something so that I can get help that helps. I’ve been told I have anxiety and depression when I was a teen but I feel as though I possibly have symptoms of borderline personality disorder. A close friend of mine has this and she has helped me learn a lot more about it. I am terrified to go to the doctor to ask them to figure out if this could be the problem, and if not, then what the fuck IS my problem, do I even have a problem? Because it starts a new cycle all over again and I’m just not sure I can take that anymore. However, I am too scared to actually commit suicide and part of me wants to come out the other side of this toxic mindset. I feel completely and helplessly trapped in my own head. Please, somebody help me.",5.197436122244491,5.809436050100203,6.0869532815631295,79.19632170591184,68.25851703406813,9.203431863727458,30.523609719438877,9.271962702966755,2.5379062625250497,3990,149,783,74,64,1319,344,998,0.23199999999999998,0.682,0.086,-0.9995,5,2,3,0,0,6,102.0,0,0,11,3,43,54,16,5,50,1,83,34,11,8,14,187,162,80,6,28,29,0,8,4,1,13,17,7,0,9,62,67,2,4,30,3,4,14,25,40,0,4,18,20,113,14,111,119,30,112,1,6,5,4,51,43,9,19,56,564,175,14,0.0,0.0,0.2429577404405616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024186770749543653,0.03729508692832725,0.0816259429280042,0.04018057147925904,0.035272893890148295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031662158997908973,0.03325033157987908,0.04046258223843307,0.03341635500494503,0.08204645256717254,0.059393896888310864,0.1084065255279425,0.0,0.030264886236543644,0.0,0.037325358463814316,0.0,0.0,0.039506904464860035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252582716069768,0.0,0.03762515614718257,0.03063780991532286,0.03729130909536564,0.0,0.0,0.02839734494354608,0.0,0.03906866503456702,0.022937764179978986,0.03666800177335475,0.06126758743474167,0.07219948608919342,0.0,0.11147979385232694,0.12228854516864285,0.2912345457191069,0.031124909935378437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278781385433672,0.0,0.0,0.0315017935700956,0.03675020514324996,0.0,0.0704749782612322,0.0,0.029966720471658874,0.0,0.03196531447113125,0.03479133797745836,0.03352938988739209,0.08004549699189788,0.14386989804104494,0.050818125124521614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027478965866658454,0.1315244251549554,0.05574684807733594,0.0,0.10106769154082737,0.0298319011642227,0.028446168546005023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629035381431379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300397931176895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622378177381787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424538750233202,0.0,0.0,0.11804880401834597,0.0,0.03909337170832298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025122014702354492,0.06950493300481547,0.07129492935311002,0.0,0.031475664196383916,0.05973462247647469,0.0,0.0,0.06047556078377396,0.0,0.0,0.0949649598050917,0.03605934227753135,0.0,0.0,0.039506904464860035,0.07165999497017711,0.1433726294829927,0.07546190503554558,0.10773755334281114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054898805340706,0.08229435884366733,0.03435081759924996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037877680288908935,0.0964044432713661,0.027050296262464902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038515580856775734,0.06790542700717375,0.02465767042902528,0.12422288438358654,0.0,0.1171256132172942,0.0,0.1202893011429118,0.0,0.0,0.07669445499980063,0.23822962139148154,0.0,0.03575464552229446,0.0,0.0,0.035576611851770065,0.2024150885966665,0.04557024513139167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03037401249495648,0.0,0.14142147776550484,0.035608758617944665,0.0,0.05668456740382415,0.032378849089350584,0.18552062114585016,0.0,0.18254500481016925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506789629903619,0.0821436125303167,0.14070663803748273,0.0,0.20139597123396705,0.0,0.0,0.059471187298724186,0.0,0.0,0.040715690696321416,0.11671353280469228,0.0,0.033521464254089924,0.07393543553186772,0.13370973898847915,0.0,0.031087114246477605,0.0,0.0,0.16518405255754254,0.0472582514150576,0.06836966725902628,0.06988876813086803,0.08470864423044172,0.0622181882855349,0.0,0.0,0.03398578019178978,0.0,0.048295298880670204,0.07737333690310155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030718457100397112,0.03917201122630539,0.029346489085192638,0.06293499118279727,0.05646283742023452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418734720872785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03857088012864458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632883520626711,0.0,0.0,0.04580794693400344
mentalhealth,mmuhm,2020/03/15,Anybody got some tips on how to live in the moment? Just cant seem to stop looking forwards.,1.4163157894736818,3.6757519473684224,2.399210526315791,94.78197368421051,82.15789473684211,3.8,25.28947368421053,3.1291,0.17971578947368405,73,3,15,0,2,23,18,19,0.0,0.9,0.1,0.2235,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,3,1,5,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,2,3,9,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41849836953403546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4620476662329905,0.0,0.439406137784532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4763557359004974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43746831631328187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,silentsearch-,2020/03/15,"my boyfriend is a paranoid schizophrenic ive been with my boyfriend for 6 months, i went into the relationship knowing that he had schizophrenia & didn’t listen to everyone that said how hard it would be. at first i didn’t mind, i love him and id do anything in the world for him, but these days it’s getting rough. we had our first argument about a week ago, he was going on and on saying that he didn’t want me around my dad anymore, that my dad has me “under his spell” & im obedient to him and on his side. he also seems to think that my dad is trying to one up him or just be against him. i tried to talk to him and told him that i understood how he was feeling and we didn’t have to go anymore. well the arguing progressed, and he got so mad he started punching a chair & then punched the wall and busted his knuckle. today on the way to work he got mad at me again. he said ive never cared about him, ive always been against him, i don’t love him etc. he’s told me twice that i make him want to kill himself. he’s on medication but once I started working and wasn’t giving it to him every night, he stopped taking it right. i do everything for this man. ive fixed tons of things with our car, i work everyday, i pay our bills, i buy our food.. but he makes me feel like i do nothing, like it’s not good enough or i should be trying harder but i feel like im giving everything in me. im so drained & tired and now im even scared bc he’s getting violent. he told me he wanted to beat me when we were in the car the other night.. just out of nowhere. idk what to do. im scared to stay but i don’t want to leave him, i love him and don’t want him to be alone. i also don’t want him to feel like im leaving him bc of his condition, bc that’s far from it. idk what to do anymore. someone help?",0.834983725135622,2.3282023139240517,2.642820976491865,96.21594936708858,80.29113924050633,5.830741410488247,21.66546112115732,6.610729790773281,0.16381952983725154,1394,41,342,13,35,463,171,395,0.149,0.73,0.121,-0.9576,0,1,0,0,0,0,46.0,7,0,0,7,16,17,5,2,10,0,35,7,0,4,1,51,73,25,1,8,10,3,6,4,0,2,3,4,0,1,20,18,1,1,8,0,3,5,11,7,1,4,21,10,64,10,45,46,3,45,0,0,0,3,65,20,0,3,22,210,84,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429940067420614,0.0,0.0,0.0751261367913796,0.0,0.11601513246406685,0.06035633837744276,0.31437390107362034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21581072124888628,0.0,0.0,0.05969151683125279,0.06457303438079133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395599161529617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04678016540533717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494979291756243,0.08089758557440062,0.04790980082931815,0.0,0.06111529133006328,0.06931191751413388,0.13038260280819647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467069234473062,0.15546068136334942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339934599291373,0.08771165566051152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579485525621289,0.13916760879432266,0.08244854712635437,0.060840335608476334,0.11602843758344315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649786282016516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04861981551102869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4701124470683735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025110228050013,0.0,0.03986426881927586,0.0,0.0,0.15361176630627654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417510545901482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964015891346132,0.0,0.0968376100769002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307308574949319,0.0,0.0,0.07324138083958133,0.0,0.057898095360699786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594476846749728,0.0,0.0,0.1361415429830002,0.0,0.06960091211512534,0.0,0.0,0.07724920943394506,0.04915273963340662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077877260902638,0.0,0.06194593847023954,0.13799800928929307,0.05768408873530927,0.14524376525591284,0.0,0.0,0.06603467993433956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061460103578414825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268368761194296,0.07731446215332784,0.0,0.06064392232950086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054538564936900895,0.058302245234179824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04819015490387323,0.046478583207290966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337025665481232,0.06875630234118504,0.20793575254240165,0.0,0.14774295691229075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567041211352615,0.05757624965206293,0.058184558822536876,0.0,0.06521919724182987,0.06724224001998841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15842272663205448,0.0,0.0,0.051527984681008894,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uniquelymeplusmore,2020/03/15,"Accepting an Abusive Family Member Hi everyone. I have a question. Is it possible to have a good relationship with a family member that abused you when you were a child? Let's say an uncle molested or raped you after taking you in when you became an orphan. Him and his wife fed you and cared for you. Treated you like their children. 

Could you still have a great relationship with him?

Could you still have a great relationship with your cousins? (His kids). 

I understand it's complicated, please don't remind me that's it's complicated. I just want to know what YOU would do and how YOU would feel. 

Thank you.",2.4461330049261067,5.26286553448276,3.612118226600989,83.92327586206899,83.3103448275862,7.452216748768473,21.216748768472904,8.418075326091056,1.5958024630541874,486,15,92,12,14,157,68,116,0.11599999999999999,0.687,0.198,0.8243,0,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,0,14,1,0,6,10,2,0,9,0,13,2,0,1,0,19,21,7,0,5,2,2,1,1,0,2,0,1,0,3,6,6,1,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,23,8,8,14,0,6,0,0,0,1,30,1,0,2,6,69,29,0,0.0,0.3604024566170014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550654164787918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24286223503834214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453280676997896,0.0,0.0,0.2867529546763037,0.0,0.07690103833309159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756548555136388,0.0,0.3353584970294832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835844305791852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15552185322686082,0.0,0.07430326413128324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16694863705707866,0.0,0.1714580980771539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703750857672613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4898617258319914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094770212086885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429177971454125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435240203509105,0.0,0.0,0.14002360933159813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15833056895614048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970634784788363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160800830428146,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nottoberevealed1,2020/03/15,"No one wants to help! I’m diagnosed with BPD (borderline personality disorder) but no professionals will take me seriously! I’m at my worst point now, but being refused any reviews because of this Coronavirus stuff! (I live in the U.K.). What happens when BPD is left untreated because I’m starting to be a bit scared for my wellbeing! I literally had a GP shout at me last time I went about my mental health, basically refusing to write me sick notes and review me because he was a locum and ‘doesn’t know me’. I know people always say ‘it will get better’ but it hasn’t and I’m losing the will",3.4536206896551715,5.472102637931035,5.209862068965517,78.3713448275862,74.3448275862069,8.777931034482759,27.97931034482759,9.3871,2.653571724137932,470,19,90,12,10,160,81,116,0.24600000000000002,0.7390000000000001,0.015,-0.9841,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,3,5,0,1,5,0,10,3,0,0,0,13,22,7,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,5,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,3,2,12,1,10,14,2,11,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,5,54,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697597476142826,0.0,0.0,0.12011908692220495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230284769554244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15622090289059848,0.19284164636244985,0.0,0.4449357537117003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792826424637523,0.0,0.0,0.202441085649812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228544203193964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619934641486566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877566675383764,0.0,0.0,0.11839592940125962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19414994101280414,0.14398257433780642,0.0,0.0,0.19191640928027345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15597353805216793,0.0,0.0,0.1976114067787875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800835755903488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969367284405352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12245772237366802,0.15423244799308922,0.0,0.0,0.1669788781056502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404686798108579,0.17684425986058566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502444220923548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20220688575970072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280889727873654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299834351875037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418496616209452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374409113879132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-moeka,2020/03/15,"Trisha Paytas is a hypocrite moron Hello people of r/mentalhealth, 
i have been diagnosed with DID not too long ago, it has been about a year. i don't use the 'we' pronounces although i do feel more than welcome to, i dont feel the need to. anyhow, i am here to talk about Trisha Paytas.
Trisha has 'come out' as bi, transgender, gay, a chicken nugget and planty more, but as of little less than two days ago she has come out as a person with Dissociative Identity Disorder.
of course, i am noone to be judging or telling her that she is not suffering from that disorder, but i do have the power to express my feelings towards it.
in the video she took a massive shit on everything people in the DID community have been building up for years, and all that with ONE video.
she called a diagnosed person ""crazy"", spread so much misinformation and hasn't stopped being ignorant and disrespectful.
doing what she does for money and fame is disgusting. i can't even pity her anymore because that's all she wants.
i am sorry for anyone feeling this way about her, and i hope she finds peace with herself and with others.

i would be more than happy to hear your thoughts on this issues.",7.3920666666666675,6.898459195555558,7.350944444444448,75.75575,63.71111111111111,10.166666666666668,33.416666666666664,9.516144504307137,2.952533333333333,929,33,172,15,12,298,131,225,0.098,0.77,0.132,0.8005,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,1,1,0,1,7,9,3,0,11,0,28,5,1,1,2,38,41,15,0,4,5,0,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,10,17,0,2,6,2,1,3,6,6,0,2,7,5,25,3,35,30,7,21,0,2,0,2,22,9,1,3,8,135,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482321347301064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388586193949424,0.09790270417947204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535268194945027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429723725293756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412234164497992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029897790519092,0.0,0.0,0.284227344390642,0.0,0.0,0.3209417898971338,0.0,0.12252927236077155,0.0,0.1640981474328876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247949444050316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583768856079527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28318594267722336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279724291416198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905003361918762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15780862947465266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390678520801472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14614071696419284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403331902772777,0.0,0.12391008485043573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102928145313002,0.10382036711190916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487871861244428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19413944792469948,0.244513794026695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437247957274234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673686728087494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170599581054697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125398576214436,0.12238048226727387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115736090238744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556334328255134,0.0,0.0,0.13677565213347154,0.0,0.0,0.12092919158230075,0.0,0.0,0.08258528503022279,0.11113848038259012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946361475837327,0.0,0.0,0.1803319083594976
mentalhealth,LaikanCrawdiddy,2020/03/15,"I’m losing my mind..? I’m feeling like I’m losing my grasp on reality. Nothing severely traumatic happened in my life. I guess I’ve always thought about things differently than my peers. Some see me as odd or having weird interests. 
I have some friends but we don’t relate deeply.  I mainly talk to them enough so they don’t leave me behind. I don’t want people to think of me as lonely. I’m not lonely. I prefer to be alone actually.  It’s hard for me to type this because i never really talk about it. But I have so many strange thoughts. Some are random small things others are not so harmless. I’ve lately realized how little things actually matter. But. I still play by the boring rules.  Anyways. If you’re still reading I feel a static almost building. I feel like something very significant is coming. I don’t know what. But everything is so still and growing lately. I have felt this before this while covid-19 chaos.",1.7486227835802737,4.475304061452516,3.2005246538741834,85.97811027447172,86.59776536312852,5.571144036920088,21.74908914257955,7.079830092131019,0.9606097158124848,733,25,135,11,23,239,114,179,0.18100000000000002,0.695,0.125,-0.8854,1,5,1,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,2,2,11,12,0,0,2,0,13,1,0,1,1,33,30,15,0,3,8,0,5,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,10,3,0,0,11,2,0,2,7,6,0,0,3,6,23,6,15,26,5,13,0,4,1,0,6,4,0,8,9,88,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.2557579500983532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122054326127738,0.13572093222313505,0.0,0.0,0.1090381970912348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988254042544507,0.0,0.11150786294866688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288186191693048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369119478072593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540235394973374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777291602220165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987776950631904,0.18723415932920776,0.1258217419599703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124342566107658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14435853707901353,0.0,0.11588081077572078,0.0,0.11738870612498452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201775517314497,0.0,0.2956442161209124,0.1387555184783738,0.0,0.0,0.09255948132532804,0.1280418912396076,0.13133942003129415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29320698916672683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13285694072251156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231598095429095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010683691948796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257392044805534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084865257194344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107837008007692,0.0,0.08394944241542761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044242314999686,0.0,0.0,0.1480411861683579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088323276187776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139531068309017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21065465127957125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261177255754276,0.08396700417088278,0.0,0.20806686264714244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10812412303023826,0.07729250234785581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scaredthrowaway78777,2020/03/15,"I need help. Considering if suicide is my only option left. Coronavirus and gang stalking. Last night I was awake until morning shaking with a fever of 101 and sweating and my throat got worse and I have kept telling my parents on the phone they need to fucking self quarantine already because clearly they are at risk of having it and since I live by myself and don’t even interact with any other humans or leave the house (no job/school) except once a week when they come visit to go grocery shopping I only could have gotten it from them. Someone from my dad’s work was exposed and they have been feeling a little under the weather. But they haven’t been listening to me, they have just been going out grocery shopping and working

I have always been weak, I would get seizures from the common cold well into my teenage years and that’s actually a whole problem in that I still don’t know if this is just a cold because I always get awful symptoms and fever. But they still came to visit me after being exposed and now I’m sick. I called my mom last night scared because my head was so heavy and heart was pounding, and I have been drenching the bed with sweat, and she got mad at me for calling because she was tired and wanted to go back to bed. I felt awful and like I am a fucking idiot overreacting

They are part of the problem with this entire country and why this is such an issue, why people like Donald trump are president, they keep saying well I feel better or fine or I’m not that sick, my dad even said he’s a hero and an “Emergency Coronavirus worker” for continuing to go to work and “bringing food to the hungry children” (he is a food delivery truck driver) I said he’s literally fucking probably spreading it to tons of people shut the fuck up, they keep saying they don’t have room to care about the country they aren’t the mayor they have their own problems so they have to take care of themselves. Then my dad said I’m not going to be able to get disability because I don’t “look or sound that retarded” and I need to go get a job like he does (I had to drop out of my dream college that I got a $72,000 scholarship to go to,  I couldn’t do it because of schizophrenia and autism.) and my mom said she lost her job at Amazon because of me and how I got hospitalized. Well I didn’t fucking tell her she had to quit, I didn’t need or want her, she quit because she said the job was too hard

They keep saying I’m overreacting and “people are laughing about it and going to Vegas and bars right now explain that!!!There’s barely any cases we’ll be fine!! I’m just sick from allergies and working so hard!!!” When I called my mom last night because I was feeling really bad she got mad at me and said was tired and needed to sleep and even said my symptoms were probably just from accidentally overdosing on ibuprofen (that I was taking in the first place for my fever..... And didn’t even take the max dose)

I’m going to go get tested so that way if I’m positive they’ll be forced to stay home. To be honest I’m terrified though considering there’s only 32 “confirmed” cases in Oregon and I’m so afraid the trump administration will send more people out to stalk me. I will be turning myself into more a political target. I’m already a target by them and now they’re really going to have reason to come for me all because of my parents. But If I don’t do anything they could convict me, they will do whatever they can to spin things like that. I have been being gang stalked by this organization, that’s a subset of the group in Russia who got trump elected for months and there is no way they won’t up stalking even more if I test positive. To be honest thinking about that I don’t know what to do I want to die the stalking is so bad already. I think you won’t believe me but I can prove this is happening. It is so bad I am starting to consider if this could be the end for me, where I would reach a point where I just have to kill myself because of this group. Even if I test negative they will spin it some way, just for me going to see a doctor. They have been searching for something to convict me for, even if they have to lie or take video or audio footage out of context to make me look like I have committed some crime. So now it’s the end of the line for me all because of my parents",4.891999167880176,5.278133654462241,5.52621884751404,83.74577303931767,68.86270022883295,8.04972748075723,28.93438735177865,7.814691822520688,1.6888364302059489,3410,114,696,37,55,1105,317,874,0.106,0.833,0.061,-0.9905,8,1,1,0,0,3,62.0,1,1,26,11,44,38,9,4,36,2,89,28,6,3,5,116,175,67,3,25,28,9,6,5,0,10,14,13,4,3,29,47,3,4,11,5,3,20,19,21,3,1,40,24,110,17,98,112,11,80,0,1,3,5,80,28,5,18,32,472,139,14,0.0447083663448835,0.0,0.0436289162932269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14801038201660582,0.0,0.07440188462299523,0.0,0.0,0.060806444459457584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036791176102146224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03437797403645702,0.11198885528480378,0.3270456618694488,0.0,0.0,0.050371018891883085,0.0,0.03954091684519575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369567221994487,0.05113446065385265,0.09116631829005928,0.0,0.0,0.07702459771363437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070879777205297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04640022572525205,0.0,0.0,0.045760907409679634,0.039124592672771685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791966848707762,0.0,0.0,0.20670618021305204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781768008022797,0.0,0.042927042899182866,0.0,0.0,0.03802891357367838,0.10812306809825,0.0,0.0,0.20666082132413688,0.11679138072715176,0.0,0.30490553878204835,0.0,0.2145441885179723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0395354607071332,0.0,0.08009982925383385,0.0,0.04588368223385325,0.0,0.0,0.052979629381078086,0.029967075549059637,0.0,0.04484613674129375,0.0,0.0,0.051587452101827136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046663918865818825,0.1774646199327969,0.11921655069804198,0.049463183265052606,0.0,0.04914109783671562,0.1093298571517418,0.0,0.04733970458074335,0.04857577084863035,0.0,0.0,0.10921124744648304,0.04480952838684172,0.03947830657777425,0.0,0.07508753527981732,0.0,0.04880446319763248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02984318170136397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570856949480759,0.035685791473790814,0.0,0.0,0.16575343573539075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12586731956063313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04761295103407073,0.0,0.10200818172428906,0.0,0.0,0.1489300498426521,0.04841480395301365,0.0,0.12398060766093998,0.0,0.04671072713969197,0.0,0.042263857217003285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640636128288717,0.12833960578587347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510570173875013,0.0,0.0,0.057282648607361465,0.04596764677044008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03818070057616703,0.2976952615480223,0.10666166213964096,0.04476087414879757,0.045247253606785234,0.03562677956516835,0.0,0.04664057663010699,0.0,0.0,0.03698322264399759,0.0,0.04474065419237159,0.0,0.03788125371988725,0.03441868466544636,0.0,0.0,0.03164481181160726,0.04765316988621923,0.07140831823035028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04890369631981225,0.0,0.0,0.0929382223201323,0.13446050986603791,0.0,0.07815416557288529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029702252004590163,0.05729463181818124,0.04392574293707354,0.0,0.0,0.10277138049413352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04862986425265259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911045847212611,0.10646226060422886,0.03586235471477986,0.0,0.12059457180899448,0.0,0.08068469336943357,0.049915294396254035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301928926925938,0.0,0.045561644848029915,0.06351908141141814,0.0,0.0,0.028790722104735864
mentalhealth,allmyhopeisgone__,2020/03/15,"I‘m totally overwhelmed with my university duties.. I just have to let it out. 
I‘ve been in some mental health troubles for quite a while now, most of the time it’s just depressive phases with a small eating disorder of some sort but I have it under control so far.


Rn I don’t know if I can finish uni. I have this one essay due; something about foreign policy and it’s just too much for me. I‘m already working on it for the second deadline now because I couldn’t make the first one and I‘m just done. It’s not even that long but I can’t do it. I don‘t know how, it just freaks me out when I think about it. I‘m not coming forward, I have to hand it in in two days. I‘m desperate, if I don‘t hand it in I‘ll loose a whole year because of one fucking essay. And not only that but I‘ll also have to pay a bunch of money for it. I‘m done. Please give me some tips :(",1.0065623081645183,2.989523508287295,2.6090147329650115,94.26728514426031,81.87292817679558,5.348189073050952,19.447820748925718,6.42735559955562,-0.04404260282381811,669,17,150,6,18,219,101,181,0.10300000000000001,0.826,0.071,-0.4221,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,4,15,5,1,1,7,0,16,5,2,3,1,35,29,13,0,3,13,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,15,8,1,2,3,0,2,2,8,5,0,6,3,2,15,0,23,24,8,23,0,2,0,1,1,11,1,7,12,115,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19012188764068294,0.13777705375045973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100478957359224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840913568925282,0.0,0.0,0.19323340129438268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111021858295612,0.0,0.1483896812808449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19745468473251548,0.0,0.0,0.35261679343887353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17629159154469706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379327961512717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14654638549762575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15927563289625446,0.0,0.16527243222445231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18313196393022932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893677623317732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617411002974007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246769046289618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500224432156328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736237681632131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665003513188705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502363617548806,0.1310312682122513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18911829395001734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18324737049122314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13263418166105245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103939136350087,0.0,0.0,0.10046135339664472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16829839005855202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923511688191881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542626155106334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094653682759767
mentalhealth,Reddit_n_Me,2020/03/15,"Hospitals Are Not Capable of Handling Mental Health Patients. As I type this, I am in a Hospital for Mental Health as I had a suicidal episode that had the police take me into the Hospital. Right at this very second, I am in an isolated room with nothing to do and a phone that is about to die. If their idea of helping mentally ill people is to lock them in a room with nothing but their own fucked up thoughts to drive them insane, humanity has no right to continue. What the hell is wrong with these people?",7.551299999999998,6.415631529999999,7.786000000000001,74.86300000000004,63.7,11.6,36.0,10.793553405168565,3.7351,403,16,78,9,5,132,67,100,0.28800000000000003,0.6990000000000001,0.013999999999999999,-0.9858,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,4,0,1,3,2,0,8,0,10,4,0,0,0,10,13,5,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,1,6,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,3,0,9,0,20,10,1,12,1,0,0,1,7,10,2,1,1,60,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18914938097801226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16848955286264716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3874518927519941,0.0,0.0,0.12216004774177562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20574095384383967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5510031358632692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497524890824065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527019516155297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31128537701740233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19935471739300328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703124181844065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14468817304641854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150377447176894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19926456141540674,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dbh_for_life,2020/03/15,"Ways my father ruined my mental health 1. I know how to stop my crying in an instant (keep myself from breathing, any way possible)
2. I have suicidal thoughts
3. I've considered murdering him
4. I'm mortally afraid of messing up
5. I'm also mortally afraid of yelling
6. I'm still in this hell-house",0.8460000000000001,3.3816392666666717,3.265000000000001,85.0125,89.66666666666666,7.0,25.83333333333333,8.07648339933343,2.239333333333333,236,11,45,6,8,81,47,60,0.264,0.736,0.0,-0.9531,0,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,2,1,0,1,2,1,1,0,5,7,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,7,0,7,6,0,7,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,20,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150221314316023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18284667857602024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29535053322918103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28580539462582194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102498216059241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389916674151279,0.0,0.0,0.14776865513019102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709664031955385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.303120238882752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147268094227177,0.2247945618939082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941095642627146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21345958643536936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4268466589514642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,honeysweetbitch,2020/03/15,"Corona is making my anxiety act up I rarely get anxious until i feel stuck and i dont know what to do...so where i live, we finally got some rules and lock downs because of the virus. Im not stressed that ill get sick really. Im so afraid for other people and that they wont make money anymore and im stressed out about my grandparents. Plus i just need someone to ask if im okay because im really not okay. With the lock down i will be stuck in my house with my step dad who has given me a few anxiety attacks before and he loves to gaslight. Im stuck, i want to cry, no one i care for is caring enough to just send me a “you okay?”. Moments like these where i just avoid everything and my thoughts by laying in my bed, sleeping my days away and i dont want to do that, but that will feel better then feeling anxious constantly.",1.357840909090907,3.091169102272733,2.980681818181818,93.28477272727275,79.56818181818181,6.218181818181819,22.363636363636363,7.1686216300943375,0.5864159090909093,646,20,147,8,16,213,105,176,0.096,0.746,0.158,0.8286,1,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,1,1,1,7,13,1,4,4,3,10,4,1,2,0,31,31,13,0,4,7,1,3,1,0,3,2,0,1,0,8,12,0,1,5,0,1,3,6,5,0,1,6,3,22,8,22,21,3,18,0,0,0,1,9,9,0,2,7,89,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15831546860259305,0.2337935382162604,0.10261893201246916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673472004917268,0.11771721902677287,0.09721772965485967,0.0,0.0,0.12615422944888596,0.0,0.08804920607720314,0.0,0.0,0.09151481541374558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109983646289487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181920985886852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136619153927693,0.06673251336377431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425427633972425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691685277608526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299623792382927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695949840082146,0.0,0.0,0.11335129278917283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081223451748099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275803638705803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939571799124225,0.0,0.0,0.6706215098779374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05686689708488951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05055242998182589,0.0,0.09136990812470837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338980568672643,0.0,0.1381401081543724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767250548838068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011702130660273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173621232276439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325768705423953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354926078054724,0.0,0.08767363577807254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370594552318941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214722075468844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206392065072623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashlaiz,2020/03/15,"Beside myself Sorry I need to vent because I am falling apart. I feel like my life is falling about. 

My job is crazy because of covid-19 (food service manager), I am very high risk if I come down with it (not due to age but health issues) 

my depression is the worst it’s ever been because I self isolate as much as possible. I haven’t seen my friends or family since this started other than my boyfriend. 

Speaking of which. and worst of all. My boyfriend in the military was brought in full time and told me last night he will be gone for atleast a year and when I asked him about us he said we will cross that bridge when we get there. I didn’t even get to say bye to him when he left too.  I’ve been crying and having panic attacks literally all day. I can’t even function. 

And I’m supposed to go into work tomorrow and be a leader for my team. How.",2.301333333333332,4.006577228571434,3.3222857142857163,92.02304761904765,76.71428571428572,6.2666666666666675,25.380952380952376,7.0316486544052195,0.9189809523809518,665,24,145,7,15,213,118,175,0.204,0.765,0.032,-0.9852,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,3,0,0,2,11,8,1,2,4,0,16,3,0,1,3,21,30,15,0,2,4,0,1,1,1,2,2,3,0,1,6,11,1,0,1,1,0,7,4,6,0,0,9,5,24,2,20,17,6,28,0,1,1,0,17,8,0,2,15,95,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15323295607385498,0.18647035359275974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997525421562041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119324403353392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800465363397658,0.10570786046386683,0.0,0.14117473552985513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21652093347833312,0.14826523621046586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545189862379289,0.0,0.08287740572568453,0.11709675009186485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198199629635304,0.0,0.1266358249536574,0.0,0.17127156165182414,0.0,0.09315336360575233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17422779233538555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17317904665025802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107859773518322,0.16265456836689424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360785739613834,0.0,0.0,0.17808780236793448,0.0,0.11577390036321025,0.08007774539373369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049210605656213,0.12153657920132713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538176608001114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19231210512708116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847829713006584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591516387177734,0.13034715782175707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17099302076156755,0.0,0.0,0.13558736650165315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834829062347327,0.11601576039703533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955767602863193,0.0,0.0,0.15662224452569362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19716256050253111,0.0,0.0,0.1352422384754318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193278343219647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555213717957687
mentalhealth,rz9426,2020/03/15,"I’m feeling really depressed. 
Hi. I am a 25 y/o male who is really depressed rn. I haven’t been happy since I was 13. I suffer from social anxiety and ocd too. Currently I’m not on any medication for this. Before I was on Luvox and klonopin but it made me feel really slow and I just stopped it. Now I just puff on some weed but it really doesn’t help. I just want to sleep all the time. 

On the surface my life seems great. I have a family. A roof over my head, a new car, etc but idk I just don’t feel like being alive. It’s a pain waking up. I feel uncomfortable around my family now, especially my dad. Idk what to do. I just needed to let this off my chest. Any advice would be helpful.",-1.0711229086229042,1.0174953175675725,2.0680308880308864,92.78842342342344,95.82432432432432,5.7920205920205925,15.155727155727154,7.2636822038024595,0.07552406692406732,529,12,123,11,21,187,93,148,0.14300000000000002,0.695,0.162,0.7209,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,0,7,0,14,7,4,1,1,25,24,6,0,3,9,1,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,8,4,0,1,5,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,4,4,18,3,13,16,3,17,0,3,0,0,7,9,0,2,8,78,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529993405377448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129472583219104,0.0,0.11977636407419942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938135894566112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332303641158481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26970869537166986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746180200591139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295202353537057,0.0,0.3166679489806567,0.11185433279193384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17262004800178346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16667270979437046,0.0,0.0,0.1606869867210775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098924426456995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010442560509713,0.11059070699816444,0.07649266760581698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14815123825634527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772878093439802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609539091147605,0.0,0.15121721921092593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16660255195785292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4012134923786936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142536331381199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295171249685388,0.0,0.15668404443786488,0.15960438723772713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090034233539713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129779215779933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234961516543876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122352538394394,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KittenAttic,2020/03/15,"I do not understand what is going on in my brain. This is new for me and I've never posted before but I need people to turn to. I am a 21 year old female and I do not understand what is going on in my brain, I am not even sure If I can explain it.

1. There is constantly , never ending, music playing in my head. But it doesn't seem to be the ""oh Ive got a song stuck in my head"" kind of thing people seem to talk about, its loud and its constant and it can change with out me even really noticing it. Its so much louder than the voice in my head, so much so that I sometimes struggle to hear my own self. It also means I become over stimulated and overwhelmed by my surroundings, even just simple convocation can be impossible for me.
2. I see certain events as colours. As strange as that sounds, but in the moment, if something is happening , my brain will just suddenly throw up a colour (e.g.blue) and start repeating BLUE BLUE BLUE and this can actually enhance the moment that Im in. For example sometimes during sex its like tunnel vision and my brain will just completely ingulf itself in colour orange, or I remember being on the train and having the overwhelming feeling of YELLOW YELLOW and just my whole body understanding the colour yellow as this environment and that moment in time.
3. I cant seem to stop dislocating, especially with large groups of people. When I am on my own it doesn't seem to be as bad or I just don't notice it as much, but when with a group of people or with my boyfriend sometimes my vision and sound just goes and I just kind of leave for a few moments.
4.  I can only explain things in images. So, I struggle to explain certain things with words as they just come to my head as images. For example I have the feeling of nervousness and sadness and lonely as all I can see it as is a plate and a sponge having paint poured on them. The paint just slides straight off the plate , but the sponge absorbs all these beautiful colours. I am the plate, and I see this image often in my head and it makes me feel nervous and anxious. 

​

I really doubt any of that made any sense but if anyone at all know what any of this could be, or is going through anything similar please comment. I feel like Im going crazy.",4.168191964285715,5.3033555066964295,5.015089285714286,84.04241071428571,70.94196428571428,7.832142857142857,26.5,8.17850203761792,1.582965178571429,1769,56,354,25,32,575,198,448,0.095,0.825,0.08,-0.845,0,2,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,2,0,22,18,0,7,19,0,35,11,10,3,8,85,68,49,0,5,25,0,4,2,0,2,0,6,0,1,31,26,0,1,17,2,0,7,9,10,0,0,3,24,44,8,62,57,10,51,0,4,14,1,11,23,0,13,22,258,75,0,0.0,0.0,0.07201499776242645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05901524666392119,0.0,0.07995876452714135,0.08967114747355183,0.15055299330350616,0.0,0.0,0.08336933953811745,0.0,0.05160041425904879,0.0,0.060728450068891986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06161721665319676,0.0,0.08150272951603756,0.06279561200465618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197157011893308,0.0,0.3295263851668288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806719273836958,0.06356937901824875,0.07737450452632927,0.15949617332853475,0.0,0.058920712309968225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536203014336557,0.0,0.0,0.14622620274664302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925544781374775,0.05272042397883419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16776160979692148,0.0,0.059022014788778776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06525823596500142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3786838585669616,0.0,0.08317431804148484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594263405371576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15369595011641785,0.040556772336144915,0.0,0.0,0.07814011919396249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210674395514376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982828379471634,0.049259913975471685,0.0,0.0,0.08038631183216546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16274734129908025,0.05471936650166927,0.1138332298741428,0.07127337592304005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16803621316043849,0.07743729138186316,0.0,0.0,0.05612576553014455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046455411195476,0.0,0.0,0.08100668770530292,0.0,0.0,0.07067690198570555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945521952358328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359734942894073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17641940267948125,0.2687272145919526,0.07698612083511387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05681235542292341,0.2189606640090192,0.0,0.05223373041147684,0.0,0.0,0.06169740031200952,0.0,0.1542968044763808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06955257808258593,0.0,0.0,0.05931504469248845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708187551165378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043031487388549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026968952895018,0.0,0.2304751062312883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239145318434457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967114747355183,0.04752269742425555
mentalhealth,beepbop134,2020/03/15,"I feel awful lately.. Im 14.. I have zero friends.. I don't know what to do.. Im worried that its never going to get better. Im feeling awful all the time. I never leave my house except school. Im trying so hard I went out of my comfort zone soo many times to try to have friends but I always fuck it up. Im sick of it. I want to be alone. Why is it so bad to be alone? If I dont feel lonely is it really that bad to be alone all the time? I can't do it anymore. Im different. Im fucked up. I never gonna have friends. Im meant to be lonely. I know Im overreacting but there are so many older people than be who are lonely so whats the chance if now I can't now even make one friend? I don't want feel this way all the time.. Its breaking me. All this stress of being different, not fit in while everyone is going out with friends everyday. What can I even do? Is there a chance that I won't be lonely when I grow up? Is there someone here that felt the same at my age and now feel better?",-1.9839271313364044,-0.1297230937500018,1.1352073732718893,99.79366359447006,96.90178571428572,3.9617511520737327,13.922235023041473,5.642373280135919,-1.068273732718894,753,15,191,6,31,264,104,224,0.19899999999999998,0.628,0.17300000000000001,-0.925,2,11,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,2,14,17,2,1,6,2,27,3,0,1,7,30,46,11,0,4,6,0,7,0,5,2,1,0,0,0,17,4,0,0,9,0,0,4,10,9,0,2,3,7,20,8,21,34,5,30,0,4,0,2,6,8,2,2,16,122,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319536101595508,0.0,0.0,0.062117176882288086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403559761516476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246640739065564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320488123765481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15599274210534014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749261994446814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861504698642187,0.0,0.0,0.07133402648370588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887336972101356,0.0,0.0716784724019741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883831513967424,0.13803077013845194,0.039003048870151484,0.0,0.08485390471350214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687431759576265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613940099375826,0.0,0.0,0.7257412928157002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205454154771928,0.0,0.08421170083930335,0.079046621410137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983137741381748,0.1513726071606758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17273071090573097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05058672384934584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05175490765504037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04782454683586993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07555270057935473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06325314337840872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551462237146497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17412277981682606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136881101303888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806440620068504,0.0592559817245743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920396812613704,0.06736261312624417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581362387103542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Moonlight_butterfly5,2020/03/15,"Can anyone relate? Does anyone have an experience of a family member who has an addiction and a mental illness and who refuses to help himself? 
How do you deal with someone who goes from house to house hospital to hospital.. 
I know the majority might say its up to him since hes 24. His own problem. We cannot do anything. The issue is that we want to put him in a long term residential hospital but everyone says he has to make the call. He has pushed me i hurt my hip and called cops they didnt do anything. Weve called cops plenty of times... no help. Hospitals just take him out too soon. 
At home hes a pain. A burden. Not wanting to help with chores. Just breaking stuff. Not showering. 
Im at the point of disowning him as my brother.",1.1917489143308335,3.593090409395973,3.2711883142518765,87.22070272404264,84.50335570469798,6.995815238847218,22.85866561389657,8.124751697461798,1.4950896960126323,577,21,119,13,17,195,98,149,0.127,0.8079999999999999,0.065,-0.8924,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,3,1,1,0,6,4,0,0,11,0,15,4,1,2,0,21,20,6,0,3,5,1,0,0,0,1,3,2,3,0,6,8,0,1,1,0,0,2,5,4,0,0,2,2,18,0,19,17,3,13,0,1,0,0,29,6,0,1,4,79,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15611080667537058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20025968085306156,0.0,0.2356853177271678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4386743236588941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14763449101876466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531662523409112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683520011544525,0.0,0.1400785760269138,0.13499765928864693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28795490401795626,0.0,0.14364281203409604,0.0,0.0,0.3304706814916122,0.15330020123569904,0.0,0.15468222752661304,0.14946519396051214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869981666903364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672884908845555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558813425463257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431346239273826,0.1519141949715502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15237652597510218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537173409338224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702452585661587,0.0,0.1439570916863015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22775921107545716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845778666092555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133419293375435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393149290171738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076697300378142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350196461409397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16892794700536254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jinxxerr,2020/03/15,"How to establish boundaries with a parent? For a little backstory, I just moved back in with my mom after living away from home for a few years. I'm starting to realize that I don't think we have many/any boundaries. Well, I know her boundaries but she doesn't know/doesn't care about mine. I feel like anytime we're home together, I don't have space where she can't/won't go. We have an extremely small house and can always hear each other talking if we're on the phone/etc. I feel uncomfortable closing the door to my room because I never did that when I was younger because I knew it made my mom uncomfortable for some reason. I still carry this uncomfortableness into my adult life. I'm still scared to close my door now even though I really want to. I'm worried that she'll ask why I closed it or be butthurt about it because she thinks Im avoiding her because I am. Even if I'm in my room with the door cracked but shut, she'll continue yelling at me thru it to talk to me though I was trying to give the hint I wanted to be alone. On weekends if I sleep in longer than normal, I'll wake up to texts from her if I haven't left my room yet. Nothing important just random things I guess she couldnt wait to tell me? Or was secretly trying to wake me up and make me open my door? I don't know. I'm in my twenties and feel like a teenager again. I don't really know what to do. She's a very controlling, anxious, and insecure woman. I want my personal space but I don't know how to ask her for it without upsetting her or making her feel cross. Any suggestions?",3.2934081527347807,4.464339696594428,4.30828560371517,88.14507030443757,73.08668730650155,7.612435500515997,25.842234262125906,8.07648339933343,1.3566884416924672,1234,40,267,18,24,401,163,323,0.094,0.846,0.059000000000000004,-0.9109,1,2,0,0,1,0,31.0,2,0,0,1,19,8,0,4,10,0,22,4,3,7,1,59,53,19,0,9,13,3,4,2,0,2,1,2,9,3,12,15,0,3,14,1,0,3,10,4,1,0,6,6,53,4,40,42,3,41,0,0,0,0,30,25,0,10,15,170,65,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092268912990543,0.0,0.0,0.08775288458488054,0.0,0.0,0.14343563821550195,0.0,0.0,0.11914211230740375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971855846496995,0.0,0.09908507953796412,0.08109381645826877,0.0,0.2571547783181253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752560163594944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182846709780587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761807758634694,0.1393133955995923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21329915079616235,0.1506842373798189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116882038230283,0.0599365206262584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161783520002386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886340945113925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21157409554758635,0.0,0.0,0.12168906078813375,0.0,0.0,0.11391712513418654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897959580385981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458483973896574,0.0,0.07449097379317217,0.10304687351513757,0.10570069273804776,0.09312493354920312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09979075372546986,0.1407934916033574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24703178651210034,0.0,0.11208948253565428,0.0,0.0,0.08133884431085586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333042976379413,0.10119369352140248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171031400730902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208540531845508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13512339579646784,0.1084325651729061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558592280292348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553822617503424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464659081380255,0.0,0.16844427906149145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16953282238826067,0.09217849125861233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700643083243691,0.13515166285774866,0.20723188235319567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320363577035286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701724663674436,0.18661277108606647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482305988296667,0.0,0.0951631080434498,0.0,0.0,0.10166166505366224,0.0,0.0,0.10710184395732728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791411069152957
mentalhealth,g3ogr4phy,2020/03/15,"Insecurities and social media For a long time now I have constantly compared myself to almost everyone I see. I pick out the insecurities in me and get jealous of what I see on Instagram! While I am completely aware that what we see is what people want to portray of themselves so it’s not “reality” I still compare myself. If I see my boyfriend has liked a post for example, part of me doesn’t care but the other part thinks “oh she is skinny, I’m not?” Or “she has a smaller chest than me, I don’t?” “Is this what he wants?” All this makes my mindset go to a horrible place and I feel as though I’m not good enough. Recently I made a new Instagram so I can post what I want and follow who I want to see. I thought it would help but I go to my old habits and fall across the same accounts and compare ect. How do I fix this and change my mindset?",1.0143434343434343,3.0890324545454533,3.1074242424242438,90.19919191919195,82.4090909090909,6.411111111111111,22.845959595959602,7.594959193182576,0.9515489898989906,656,23,146,11,18,222,103,176,0.09,0.84,0.07,-0.7439,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,0,0,6,6,1,2,8,0,12,2,2,4,1,31,33,17,0,6,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,13,9,1,0,3,0,1,4,5,3,0,0,2,6,28,3,16,30,5,20,0,0,5,0,7,5,0,3,10,103,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932606736513056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185991302682294,0.0,0.14718898322478935,0.0,0.1458829791269643,0.150358164274898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376618949241055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13295180519550634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035208015642089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07269357992289517,0.0,0.15815004936142935,0.11670189973027255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932609062380305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797553462679752,0.0,0.0,0.12313227329257402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165522841997593,0.09287533466317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437982544432328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600135834750175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3013446196711926,0.0,0.096460395405215,0.0,0.1453690313208337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26651045018661595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738145562776755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5543727053296678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14183311800779558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111535491999516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915366594898769,0.13670184755878842,0.11045960106987952,0.08113217157170641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3282675142563509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09883925920862813,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway1128oi,2020/03/15,"Exhausted and Sick. Every day, I come out of work and I lay in my bed and I just cry. 

I've been working really long hours, without days off, because a huge chunk of my team is at home sick or stuck in another country. For hours on end, I have to deal with people screaming and treating me like shit over the phone.

Its been 9 straight days. My dog automatically lays in my arms because she knows I'm going to start bawling.

To make it worse, I've been 2 days in with a sore throat. 

Today, it was hard to breathe. I nearly toppled over on the subway stairs because I couldn't catch my breath. I've taken my work stuff and placed it in a spare room with a taped-up sign telling whoever is left not to enter. It's been 2 days of possible signs, I cannot risk getting anyone else infected. 

I'm terrified. I have a 3-year-old. I cannot get him infected, his immune system is just starting to toughen up. It'll kill him.

 I cannot imagine having to deny him a hug when he comes running to me if I test positive for the virus. He wont understand. 

I purposely get home as late as possible. Grandma knows. She's afraid for me. I see her pray day and night in. I see it in her eyes, but from a distance, because she's older and at higher risk. 

I'm angry. I survived so much, put so much effort into recovering, into coping, into healing. I don't want this to be the end.

I hate this pandemic and I hate that it's come down to this. I'm tired, fed up, and sick of it.",1.1774306964164971,3.0314871960784338,3.2173292765382016,90.78970588235296,80.63398692810458,6.1814739688979055,22.643227405904888,7.237678284180719,0.7344770340320035,1126,37,250,15,29,381,168,306,0.179,0.7490000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.9856,0,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,0,6,5,12,4,3,11,0,19,18,6,1,0,35,44,17,1,3,7,0,1,1,0,2,10,1,4,0,14,19,1,0,4,1,0,8,8,9,0,0,8,5,36,3,46,32,2,55,1,0,3,1,15,28,1,2,19,145,50,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108491336078213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391687807152655,0.10831530065877996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25776627265248336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731867624774281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612059461393985,0.4090562316378377,0.10898529973982107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830951590905703,0.0,0.1872604040874481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906762994640205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656917926646776,0.0,0.0600790450740785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469794359374374,0.2087390941769357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120772025151894,0.0,0.20821171309352293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695559859328328,0.0,0.116194028237662,0.0,0.1192486919151586,0.0,0.11485731369710868,0.0,0.0,0.05164595553738679,0.0,0.0,0.09355253984539696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056414386247506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542220679180768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920434237361833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092784636430883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328797514528919,0.0,0.11044742155141574,0.0,0.0,0.2383506946389829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627060572932337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772235443261597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16847889904971666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851271464538936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14964818935999355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101591414989332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239768463904634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150136253403827,0.10020341489225892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005079817314832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06235217397969697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190340869384776,0.0,0.23088062715039065,0.0,0.10773041875492917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680756052364976
mentalhealth,marigoldsinthemornin,2020/03/15,"my therapist recommended meds for anxiety and since i’m a minor, she had to call my mom before referring me to a psychiatrist.  

i feel like i’m a completely different person when i get home.  i feel like i put on this like happy bubbly mask but when i’m alone i get super down.  

my mom told me that she had never seen me anxious or sad, but i’ve been depressed for 4+ years now.  I know the meds will be beneficial to me, i just cannot disappoint her more than i already have.",3.1869571428571426,3.9423336100000057,5.439428571428577,81.50900000000003,72.9,9.314285714285717,26.285714285714285,9.606745405546679,2.1627714285714283,371,12,81,9,7,131,67,100,0.11800000000000001,0.6629999999999999,0.22,0.8293,1,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,0,1,10,17,6,0,0,4,2,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,5,3,18,5,8,10,1,8,0,3,1,0,8,2,0,1,8,49,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828574392601476,0.18996142967946275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13168708577314234,0.19446987708809932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647896955731618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17577479632679688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18048614116833886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148264444223608,0.0,0.0,0.1798502859311784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17407891649302235,0.24595455422814735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987271450738435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18324686677862848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726710545890165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460397041641512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522976020657192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38241879458476497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40321797414428096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276544077720892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15030652979932888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17304884584925234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239648094725124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19986850121308816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16448771765359668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108529008169062
mentalhealth,liam8888881,2020/03/15,"Life is hard In times like these with the virus outbreak effecting loads of countries and the bleak, bland politicians making things sound even worse it’s really hard to stay positive everything is just negative and depressing right now",8.43341666666667,10.938416175,6.130000000000003,74.8616666666667,62.25,11.333333333333336,33.333333333333336,11.20814326018867,4.398333333333333,197,8,30,6,3,56,36,40,0.243,0.636,0.121,-0.6249,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,2,0,6,3,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,4,3,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,17,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661256952750333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20407965967584535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277693047645324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5535742624703821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21824308445292664,0.15095297036669675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20624784664333645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19794174501097592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638688915937049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.329333640531787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052738738686317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801698560855665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148789976038363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wave_user,2020/03/15,"For some odd reason, I get a random wave of sadness I got to hangout and met a new friend for the first time and after we left, I get a random wave of depression. I felt like I didn’t do enough to make her feel comfortable or happy, there were moments where It was awkward while I was feeling extremely nervous about not making any move. I felt useless and unlikable",9.447625570776252,6.341592575342468,9.094520547945203,73.19968036529683,61.602739726027394,11.925114155251142,39.401826484018265,9.725611199111238,3.6996977168949776,290,11,56,4,3,94,55,73,0.19399999999999998,0.63,0.17600000000000002,-0.1263,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,1,3,9,0,2,4,0,5,0,0,3,0,16,15,5,0,0,2,0,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,5,0,1,8,4,9,4,8,7,2,9,0,3,0,0,4,2,0,4,7,38,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16105555667475055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039851764958629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447133107824688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395012417912102,0.0,0.4547964513951104,0.0,0.0,0.20145127378491628,0.0,0.0,0.1829777191146796,0.0,0.247472464539387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18941815581259686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521146904633288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573213377127319,0.0,0.0,0.11570535596347648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161776870583876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517175540438801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287362007920964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435052733457445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810008032056575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nothotboy,2020/03/15,"Extreme religious obsession and fear of afterlife I was born in a muslim family and i have developed so much fear abput afterlife and what happens after death .

Any solutions?",4.771000000000001,8.281515100000004,6.2150000000000025,63.86250000000001,81.33333333333334,12.333333333333336,34.16666666666667,10.686352973137794,6.281666666666667,143,8,19,7,4,48,25,30,0.349,0.604,0.047,-0.9001,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,3,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,14,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24445652605985144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33888269987149205,0.8090225985105035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178841146380606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26425678298701505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loveislandfan11,2020/03/15,"I've never been more scared in all of my life Most people won't understand but I am so scared with everything with the Coronavirus. I just had two long stays in hospital. I had Pneumonia in February and was in hospital for a week and I had my appendix out 5 days ago. I'm so scared that I'm about to get the virus and give it to my loved ones. Also my partner thinks that I shouldn't be leaving the house just incase but that will really make my mental health suffer. I'm already suffering. I miss my family, I miss my nephew and my mother and father in law. I'm so on edge about it all and it's only day one of trying not to leave the house. I've already cried about this all weekend. Every time I open my phone or watch TV all that's talked about is the Coronavirus and it's honestly making me feel so depressed. I have nothing to look forward to. Nothing to do. What's even the point.",1.4624731182795718,3.464382344086019,3.2217204301075286,90.36924731182795,80.39784946236558,6.929032258064518,21.086021505376344,7.984000788550335,0.9275182795698922,700,20,152,13,18,233,107,186,0.114,0.7859999999999999,0.1,-0.5733,0,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,12,10,0,3,7,0,13,4,1,2,5,30,28,15,0,1,6,3,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,10,11,0,0,3,2,0,1,4,8,0,3,5,3,19,2,22,19,6,19,0,5,2,1,8,10,0,2,9,100,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12072599369787335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3005825248584048,0.1089126959493841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14960052069947316,0.17566515067614774,0.0,0.11730197300225505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995353381741363,0.0,0.11474763681454808,0.0,0.12240059098442745,0.0,0.12838970006913358,0.0,0.06886276905314463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115470068186412,0.1306477796533438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14476573103581908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142945729720402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28841533414867554,0.0,0.0,0.09619643970857022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052563733556257,0.11436698206043662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229186003990716,0.0,0.1818184396942718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13724950677052264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050396690267354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261359800846405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457445242086995,0.1035801556659104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441838701564084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12874546440042986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724808480181001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4090558630037468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14516255474868564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946597350691964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726633661486717,0.0,0.0,0.07941465243529991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246543046060618,0.0,0.13303979789273698,0.14178067865421712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924501018780068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spac3bxby,2020/03/15,"Link between past seizures and mental health?? Hi there, I am 21F from the UK and I have been suffering with some mental issues from a young age. I am wondering if there are any professionals I can talk to regarding my current issues linking with things that happened in the past which may have contributed to my current problems. I used to have seizures as a child but they stopped around the age of 14. They would only happen once a year either on the last day of March or the first of April. I have read that Epilepsy can cause multiple mental health issues however I was not diagnosed with epilepsy as every test taken came back negative. The cause of my seizures is still unknown to this day. I am asking if someone could tell me if there could be a possible link between  my seizures and my bad cognitive and behavioural issues. I still have some absent seizures today however my tonic clonic seizures are no more. I have been diagnosed with Anxiety and Depression but I have concern I may have something similar to ADD.

I know this is a complicated request so I wont be surprised if no one has a clue! Thank you :)",4.409547130068457,6.615762848341234,4.5845102685624015,83.07248946814116,72.17535545023695,7.911637704054768,30.679568193786203,8.680891452615391,2.5921119536598205,895,40,162,17,18,279,118,211,0.146,0.821,0.033,-0.9737,4,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,2,1,8,6,0,0,12,0,29,4,0,3,0,38,38,15,0,8,9,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,6,12,0,1,5,1,0,1,5,4,0,2,5,0,24,2,22,25,4,23,0,2,0,0,9,3,0,10,19,122,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078403894147011,0.0,0.08819961754089546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263613064529192,0.10778435470105263,0.0,0.0,0.08865399255962719,0.0962656993947295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13186565588593946,0.0,0.2368774564663267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841058031322312,0.0,0.0,0.14871022290316327,0.0,0.09930257928224794,0.23404202749606495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714019304695068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980690432029614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20390826030962012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451043254534285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4813480528603833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336258380683045,0.09398002271451412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485677950344595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278437938896715,0.07812621870669037,0.08768630532654308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22012239526347213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997669582113364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032081611693594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11532523041704963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768825765796472,0.08875897721624748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18414792292226065,0.0963909717847351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926689742266344,0.10077206419806396,0.10614725278056396,0.0,0.0,0.07659623063961356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928525966678566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957702430798768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503145765419546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190157111746091,0.0,0.0,0.07424557539524508
mentalhealth,blaizek90,2020/03/15,"How are inpatient treatment centers dealing with the outbreak? Having been admitted to two separate facilities in the past, I know that a mixture of visitors and outpatients often enter the premises on a daily basis. Are those people now barred from entering? I imagine it would suck for especially lonely patients to not be able to see loved ones during their time of crisis.",8.940692307692311,10.149428876923082,8.901346153846152,60.18740384615384,60.23076923076921,11.423076923076925,40.865384615384606,11.20814326018867,5.403846153846155,307,16,40,8,4,100,57,65,0.142,0.784,0.07400000000000001,-0.7053,0,2,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,3,3,1,0,5,0,6,2,0,1,0,9,11,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,3,1,0,2,1,2,0,2,1,1,3,1,10,8,0,8,0,1,1,1,4,3,1,1,3,34,6,0,0.3660165976670289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37734704045983597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011531499168236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33034426963655755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480223191631799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3494042581144736,0.253749823034751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916678400119728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21342722152715268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3575450316289427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26000768945344105,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,baobaab,2020/03/15,"Do i need help? I have urges to break stuff i like , and i like must do weird stuff like press random buttons . When i put stuff on a table , i must take it back and ""correct"" it , like 3-5 times . For example , i sometimes turn the light on and off until it's ""right"" . I have like something , that i need to erase part of what i written and rewrite it until it's right or something bad will happen to my mom , dad etc.
I also think i'm gay but i can't come out to my dad because he is extremely homophobic . I feel like i am just worthless . I do nothing , just sleep , eat , and use my phone all day . When i sleep , i need to look to the other side of the room to ""check"" . I am constantly scared that something will happen to my mom , like i panic when i am not with her , that something will happen . I cut myself , like on my wrist , and i've never been to a therapist or something , i didn't tell my parents . My dad is like he yelled at me because i read a book on my bed instead of sitting on a table , and he is angry because i go to the toilet often , he says that i don't need to go that much , while i actually don't go that much , but he feels really bad for that , and he is now better for me . He thinks i'm lazy , but i like don't consider myself lazy , i have absolutely nothing i can do . I have no stuff to read , nothing to just do so i use my phone or just lay in bed and think about stuff . I feel like i am anxious to people , i hate when i have to go through hallways when there are many people , and i sometimes get stressed and just don't know what to do so i walk away quickly . I lie to my friend about having stuff because i just don't have anything to do or just talk. I feel like if i would dissapear , only my parents and close friends would notice . 
I don't know what to do with myself.",4.438447096854404,3.4864654046997434,5.633562103692652,87.15675369886861,69.88772845953002,8.339624518214597,28.420862862116127,7.07126945348624,1.2511458162377218,1362,39,322,10,21,458,156,383,0.12300000000000001,0.759,0.11800000000000001,-0.7096,2,0,5,0,0,1,51.0,0,0,0,1,23,24,2,3,8,0,41,5,3,2,5,57,72,31,0,9,16,7,5,12,2,7,0,2,3,0,22,17,1,0,9,3,1,7,11,9,0,0,3,9,59,15,42,62,5,39,0,1,1,1,23,15,0,7,27,222,81,3,0.0,0.0,0.0668981996597254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05482210479704831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744579455962065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05641358194770451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440814725545184,0.05271330957502582,0.11447840006162698,0.16715799095676034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062988436522676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05905265766773905,0.0,0.07408183836576833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044211252029022576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014721133467096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764551282232361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865057360809105,0.14692362253970262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592832639618313,0.0,0.03581630611179283,0.0,0.15584183872997254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18186455466249715,0.0,0.0,0.06768225970313811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045949878512345485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753502780698006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4019005626997917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057567564747026685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950235676519141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605777555676534,0.0,0.0,0.1007892288236276,0.20332581929995025,0.05287258471599262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19733642070153412,0.07804846550961296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052137926614635684,0.0,0.08043260842377517,0.15224080810297078,0.07423661865829985,0.0,0.09505254943180018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06891507088447067,0.0,0.0,0.1371438419695846,0.0,0.04391704389146228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170884059152824,0.0,0.054516390932860974,0.0686338820708908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13720575578599273,0.0,0.0,0.2638786651608413,0.13560207062075794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785276531095673,0.0,0.4708632407552579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05154360226891036,0.0551006016240405,0.059918666528347715,0.0,0.0,0.07959574570449174,0.0,0.13177869327680886,0.0,0.0,0.039974021029215004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456638038713655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184162011739384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739669355764127,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,apy17,2020/03/15,"Illness I suffer from mild depression, PTSD and Dysthymia. I was in an emotionally abusive relationship and my self-esteem is low from childhood. Finally, after 10 years of that relationship, I started seeing a Psychiatrist and Psychologist. So currently I am on medication and I am trying to get better. But it's affecting my present. My present relationship with friends and my boyfriend. I keep on getting angry a lot on them and I want to stop it. I don't want my past to affect my present but somehow it is. It's difficult. They are supportive but there's a limit to everything. Right? Please help me out. My psychologist says that it will keep happening until I am healed completely so until then I have to control but it's so difficult. And when I get sad I go all in it. It's difficult to live. Please give me suggestions.",2.662570850202428,5.547292423076925,4.480053981106612,77.56670040485831,83.1025641025641,8.412415654520919,29.364372469635626,8.99025400887824,3.2697230769230767,662,33,117,20,19,223,89,156,0.175,0.711,0.115,-0.8658,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,3,6,10,0,0,4,0,10,3,0,3,1,25,23,18,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,10,9,0,5,0,0,0,1,1,7,0,0,1,2,23,3,19,21,2,24,0,4,1,0,10,8,0,2,15,86,33,0,0.0,0.1764774277891581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317312104982348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15616773177201645,0.0,0.1670563364557836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828753391787426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754493687867905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386364752092206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16316377783366853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507581457820194,0.0,0.2334554358339398,0.1428832016597972,0.08464981533901858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13171303328513578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983580180056742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26478125762504273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152262336937934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662911794126822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15004808284777296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218643389001376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269973941609266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17411066661311725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4797388905650956,0.0,0.1271996277744438,0.0,0.11844835669354505,0.0,0.0,0.11869119819976112,0.0,0.155383843067518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542520757048032,0.0,0.0,0.1245260712419547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902289665113554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112500022670387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17570518994966444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591676108127346
mentalhealth,jetten11,2020/03/15,"for those who live by feeling... I live my whole life. by feeling. I let it dictate pretty much how i live and who i am as a person. and this can be a wonderful, wonderful thing. it really can be. letting your heart dictate and choose where it wants to go is an incredibly freeing way to live, and I’ve always wanted to be open. just live wide and be open so that maybe people will be open with me in return. I’ve had more “stuff” to deal with and process and cope and break down and understand than i ever have in my entire life. I pretty much spent the last 9 months processing a dream like life altering reality that I happened to find myself in (I’m not going to get into it but I was in a hospital for about a month and pulled from school for about 3, and had my final consultation just today. A year later) I know it takes time, and i’ve healed so much and know and have felt. on such a wide range. it’s truly incredible. But sometimes it’s almost too much. i’m just wondering if anyone else out there understands what i’m talking about. and how to deal with living a life by feeling. and how i can protect myself without limiting the beauty and bliss that comes with feeling the world around you.",3.5785185185185178,4.801042098765431,4.6799382716049385,85.55472222222225,72.45679012345678,7.704526748971193,24.61111111111111,8.167268648758528,1.3140518518518518,942,27,195,14,18,309,133,243,0.017,0.851,0.132,0.9694,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,0,1,17,2,0,0,12,0,18,6,1,3,1,58,42,26,0,3,8,0,5,1,0,1,5,1,0,1,17,28,0,2,14,1,2,4,2,0,0,0,5,6,18,3,33,29,6,32,0,0,0,0,9,16,0,5,11,138,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661784055099347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028495294027313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746598705100397,0.09886238248048797,0.0,0.08589392872132877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311504787838875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989478184909685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060254724280494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727805845587565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19514700131943727,0.0,0.09264269679429096,0.1056968442919645,0.08818741340920341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05041049996527048,0.0,0.10967162528380184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532317745519022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433761586029385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605351590878136,0.07864982167115263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973290865424094,0.27260662045474743,0.04713869766185736,0.0,0.5111989840287491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09693420795928323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15403008155652045,0.0,0.2837163274322255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06689196988760578,0.08424876820233825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19632403006436244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181207332367537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765004327254942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542815714973447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11045458506921348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254625176244224,0.0775526339200153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410170700626681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056262373328372674,0.0,0.0914584391002798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008928385021264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382112102314622,0.07658692720698372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772434278807398,0.0,0.09301007064637673,0.3139082614714471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06213449514102231
mentalhealth,JustSomeRandomGirl06,2020/03/15,"Mental health problems?? Today I got in a fight with my mom. She said that I don’t listen to what other people say and that I’m ignorant. Anyways, she ended the argument with “well, do you always behave like this when someone is trying to talk to you?! Like that time when your teacher told you that it’s annoying when you can’t sit still”  so I was wondering: do you have any tips to why it is that I can’t sit still?? Like, if I don’t move something I feel very weird for some reason, it’s like I have to move it.. (I do have anxiety but idk if it’s something else?) any tips???🙏🏻🙏🏻🙏🏻",0.5355208333333329,2.1886123437500022,2.8590625000000003,93.56302083333335,81.8125,5.8291666666666675,20.041666666666664,6.816661863887847,0.1722947916666664,452,12,106,5,12,155,74,128,0.125,0.8009999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.6057,0,0,2,0,1,0,21.0,0,6,0,0,8,10,2,0,2,0,13,1,0,1,0,12,20,8,0,3,3,1,1,4,0,0,1,3,0,0,13,3,0,1,3,0,0,2,4,5,1,0,4,4,17,5,9,16,1,13,0,0,0,0,15,1,0,4,12,67,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327517595446218,0.0,0.0,0.23418906854951904,0.0,0.13172423706146727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438419494021745,0.0,0.1525084884256223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706401363848433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13771540203888594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830290264912336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364917063246563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17352617522716876,0.0,0.0,0.2016658645826696,0.0,0.36601965642295226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11937428378038854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476177267167627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17703913583962738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637913232794646,0.13693173220085605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589531756067972,0.265119257478532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750209732161429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839912541131252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040488463928113,0.0,0.16321519132434925,0.16453412258835987,0.0,0.11690513770216908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14207409114731784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548187350597171,0.0,0.15537393572641528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867318002886528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reluku,2020/03/15,"Guys we've created r/StayingAtHome so we can share ideas of stuff to do during our confinement due to COVID19 Hi guys, please join us at r/StayingAtHome so we can share ideas of stuff to do during our confinement.",3.4540243902439016,5.979324097560978,3.661158536585369,87.07027439024392,76.3170731707317,8.978048780487804,24.88414634146341,9.516144504307137,2.3848975609756096,172,6,34,5,4,53,24,41,0.0,0.743,0.257,0.8565,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,5,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,6,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,0,1,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4815322963727199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5489949872962543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669161267652563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5567189358866704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924909557088005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lincolnkat10,2020/03/15,Help please I recently started feeling a few symptoms of depression and I remembered that they were symptoms of them and then I looked up symptoms of depression then I realized I have almost every symptom of depression other than hurting myself so now I'm scared that I have depression but I dont know what to do about it please give me feedback and tell me what I should do,4.522083333333335,6.6412914861111165,5.151111111111113,79.50500000000002,71.6388888888889,8.688888888888886,32.83333333333333,9.2995712137729,3.30765,305,15,53,7,6,98,46,72,0.185,0.708,0.107,-0.684,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,2,0,3,6,0,1,1,0,7,4,0,0,0,10,13,7,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,2,13,0,8,11,1,6,0,5,1,0,5,1,0,1,5,44,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867281707016197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5115133359048994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17400755835106607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509368979898774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507167999072256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14242744578082542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09951735461381687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589418718959329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08159608453488479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467871386524992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32595436752752194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659775021032026,0.0,0.16818933060945185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864592903627855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508893180409268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.61727518340378,0.0,0.0,0.12977068444885087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leahkthomp,2020/03/15,"Auditory hallucinations? Medication change in progress.. kind of freaked out and looking for a safe place to discuss. Last week, I was diagnosed in a ""gray area"" between cyclothymia and bipolar II. I've been on cymbalta for 6 months trying to treat (misdiagnosed) anxiety and depression, and last Monday my psychiatrist and I decided to start weaning off of it while weaning onto a mood stabilizer.

My highs and lows have been even heavier since starting this change; I am so easily agitated, have random hypomania, and then crash into a weepy depression for a few days. 

Today, I just feel really low. Not weepy. My kiddos were being extra loud today and i could feel my anxiety rising, and then I swore I heard a, ""shh shh shh,"" like someone was shushing them, but no one was and I know I didn't say it. It's freaking me out. Is this a bipolar trait? Maybe a side effect of the med switch?",4.051818181818181,6.454265696969697,5.363030303030302,76.20454545454548,73.84848484848484,8.521212121212121,29.181818181818183,9.21078282632365,2.878381818181818,700,30,123,17,15,233,110,165,0.16399999999999998,0.789,0.047,-0.9321,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,2,3,11,0,0,9,0,13,4,0,1,0,24,20,15,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,13,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,6,0,1,8,7,15,4,18,10,2,28,0,4,2,0,4,14,0,1,14,82,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622975140260452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3627150107516337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687841236092066,0.0,0.0,0.11056261598774147,0.0,0.2953166964701494,0.1740048418049237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323245365303347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733672925192022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811324942903421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785251468750436,0.09421723516597144,0.2794879049753081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375540829490026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14396381605064598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17223140578917392,0.0,0.19042774495978412,0.17270463771893302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683929563567454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617007827453635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17911506895174506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982686615391647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363335015210777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14181437283403953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14525792655132055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426878362501298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250042656590603,0.0,0.0,0.11639439969518495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13751633791312656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,daydreambelieveher,2020/03/15,"Not an interesting title I was walking toward the entrance to a supermarket in my town, where I have lived for two years. A couple, a man and woman in their young 30’s, around my age, around my height, not dressed very differently than me, strangers to me on every way, were walking out. It was windy but as we were passing the woman said to the man, “[my name here] caused this to happen.” I heard her say it very clearly. I can only assume she meant people staying home under quarantine and to avoid getting sick. I don’t know why people know my name or my face or why they want to/feel it’s ok to hurt me but I wish so badly I could understand why they do that. I am very introverted and I always seek solitude so it’s a mystery. I don’t understand people like her, how they can be so mean. Obviously I did not cause a new virus or people getting sick. Getting victimized like that, just now, it makes me feel so disgusting, like I can’t stand to be on my own body. Does anyone know what this feels like?",3.4480882352941187,4.591912338235296,4.579686274509808,86.45158823529414,72.67647058823529,7.400784313725492,24.87450980392157,7.793537801064563,1.1488709803921573,783,23,166,10,15,257,118,204,0.149,0.7390000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.9077,1,2,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,4,0,11,11,2,1,9,1,16,4,2,4,2,38,34,14,0,3,9,0,2,4,0,0,2,3,1,4,10,7,0,1,10,0,0,3,6,5,0,1,8,5,31,6,19,23,1,23,0,1,0,0,17,12,0,4,9,107,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102876861197001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645068261456458,0.0,0.0,0.22012836675143915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323270688750807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373341337182521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540209148782809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871501755317554,0.13680328255148655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291755717401779,0.0,0.0,0.10819659502393662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417048999657336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18754551973163086,0.08832713275940844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937875212428659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933282467606104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240191645180418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235721724235125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038449130757725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416134570060221,0.0,0.10917476853372836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252943798736008,0.0,0.0,0.13467821199786742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941051422296987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403239900336877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3428605560217835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760821173690425,0.09832203459704528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178183775378474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077652595085454,0.2574233888812253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060433140064306,0.07292499553120765,0.09813822380439303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3346926509677833,0.0,0.1421777928162518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961892730913198
mentalhealth,realDolanTurnip,2020/03/15,I can’t take this Coronavirus shit anymore! I am tired of seeing all of the politics and negative stuff all over the internet. I have no motivation to do watch a tv show or play a video game. I have no motivation to do anything.,2.7504347826086963,4.634501652173917,5.0558695652173915,79.29728260869571,75.95652173913044,9.817391304347826,28.89130434782609,10.125756701596842,3.1971478260869564,180,8,37,6,4,63,34,46,0.28,0.584,0.136,-0.8268,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,4,0,6,2,1,2,2,6,8,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,2,4,1,5,8,2,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,1,0,28,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3876138994816023,0.0,0.0,0.32163269930760674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31145341065934906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4011974824958717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4474248041580687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938673162990299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44921962304392105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scratchy_ghost,2020/03/15,"I'm 99% certain that my 17yo sister is faking mental illness and I don't know how to help **TLDR:** As the title says, my (22M) sister (17F) is apparently faking mental illness, as well as lying about other serious events. I'll go into more detail throughout this post, but that's the basic idea. It's creating a lot of problems and I want to know how to help her, but have no idea where to start. 

### Background

Before I get too deep into this, I should say that I'm pretty sensitive to these types of issues. I've struggled with my own mental health, had a long term relationship with someone who had severe BPD (they would maim themselves during arguments, try to bite me, etc.), and grew up with two other special needs sisters. So I'm pretty familiar with what these things look like. 

I believe that she probably has a real underlying mental illness, but the problem is that it's so buried beneath fakeness that it's hard for anyone to help her. She was recently forced to drop out of school because of these issues and has shattered her relationship with most of the adults in her life, aside from me, which is putting a lot of stress on me, especially since no one else wants to help anymore. 

### Evidence That She's Lying

I'll start with the things I'm completely sure she's lying about or that I know are true, then move onto the more vague instances. And for clarity, I'm going to call her Jane.

1. Before Jane dropped out, she was living with my Dad, stepmom, and youngest sister, in an apartment. Jane recently moved in with me after dropping out, so it's just the three of them living in that apartment now. I babysat my youngest sister a few weeks ago while they had a night out. While there, my youngest sister (elementary age) asked me questions about things Jane had been telling her. There were several lies, but the most serious was that Jane told her that our Dad used to rape our Mom in front of all of us when we were little, before this youngest one was born. I can't tell you how blatantly untrue this is, and it was kind of horrific to see my youngest sister thinking about these things.
2. At one point Jane had video evidence that our youngest sister was in an abusive situation with her mom (different from our Mom), but didn't tell anyone because the mom was buying weed for Jane. Only after Jane and the mom got in a fight did Jane release this evidence, which was months into this situation. There are other instances of Jane putting others in harm's way for her own gain, this is just the most obvious. 
3. Jane would constantly make up lies to our parents when we were growing up to get the rest of us punished, often hurting herself (scratching herself/hitting her head into things) to convince our parents that we had hurt her. When she was around six or seven she shoved a pencil into my brother's nose during an otherwise normal sibling argument. Around that same age she would sit at the desktop computer in our living room, look at images of roadkill, and then draw those images. There are lots of other cases where she was excessively violent at a young age, though nothing like this has happened since she was little. 
4. Jane used to watch a YouTuber with Tourettes syndrome and shortly after started imitating Tourettes at school (she was 15). This led to the first instance of her being removed from school, after which she immediately stopped showing signs of Tourettes. She started doing this again more recently after Billie Eilish came out with Tourettes, but has once again stopped. 
5. My aforementioned ex with BPD has large self-harm scars all over her body, anywhere she can reach herself. They are not like average self-harm scars; they are huge, wide, and very disfigured looking, and she told me that she had at points been able to see her bones because she had cut so deep. Before Jane and my ex met, Jane had never self-harmed before; just weeks after they met, Jane started to fill her arms and legs up with similarly severe scars. Again, they are uniquely bad, not like typical self-harm scars, and it's clear that her decision to start doing this was influenced (indirectly) by my ex.
6. Jane has been evaluated two or three times now for mental illness, and the results always come back inconsistent, with doctors telling us that she is trying to manipulate the results. This doesn't mean she doesn't have anything; by now it should be clear that something is wrong. But no one can properly diagnose her. 
7. I had a period of insomnia in high school that lasted a year or two, and at severe times would cause me to have very, very minor hallucinations (vague shapes in peripheral, random pops and slapping sounds, etc.; I was always aware that they weren't real). I mentioned it to Jane once, and she soon started repeating it to other people as if it had happened to her. She even asks me questions about what it's like, which I usually don't answer since it seems like she's just trying to make it more believable. 
8. I know for sure that Jane was molested when she was in elementary school, the person who did it (stepdad who is now long gone) has admitted to touching her (I went through a similar experience in a completely unrelated incident). I don't want to be too graphic, but the parts of the story that we know for sure happened are definitely not severe, just over the clothes touching. Well, she recently decided to tell me the ""full"" story, which included years of her being raped in her bedroom. Now, this is one of the points where I'm not sure what's real and what isn't. The story she told me was incredibly detailed and included things that I don't think the average person would be able to lie about. On the other hand, other aspects make no sense at all. Jane shared a bedroom and at times a bunk bed with our older sister, but claims she was raped without our older sister knowing, even though she was in the room while it happened. She also told me stories about him touching her under her clothes during certain events, events that I was in the same room for. I would've been a young teen at this point and I don't think I was so oblivious that I wouldn't notice something like this. But again, there's no way to know for sure, and I want to believe her. 
9. Jane frequently has panic attacks that always end with her needing to be picked up from work/school, and the nature of the panic attacks is always different. I'm not totally sure what a real panic attack looks like, so this could be real. But it seems overdramatic and only happens at times when it will garner the most attention (i.e., these attacks rarely happen around family, instead, it's almost exclusively around teachers, school employees, etc.). Her attacks are sometimes just her breathing heavily, other times she rocks and thrashes around making odd noises, other times she acts like a baby (I mean that literally, not in a cruel way), sometimes she says she can't remember who she is or who anyone else is, etc. Everyone who has ever been around her during these has commented afterwards (not to her) that it seems really, really fake. 
10. Jane recently told me that our Dad hit her shortly before she dropped out of school. This jumped out as being suspicious to me, as I've seen my Dad get hit by one of his exes before (the deadbeat mom). He didn't even react, he just waited for her to calm down, and then he asked her to leave and apologized to us kids. My Dad is a huge dude and is really into bodybuilding and stuff like that. He has an abrasive personality for sure, but I've never seen or heard of him hitting anyone before, and the only reason he would have to hit my sister is that she didn't do her chores or something, which makes no sense. I can't picture a huge, stocky guy like my dad slapping a teenage girl, let alone his daughter. My youngest sister said that to her knowledge this never happened. 

### The Illnesses She's Faked

I'm going to go ahead and stop there since this post is already insanely long. Right now, the mental issues Jane is claiming to have are:

* Depression
* Anxiety
* Hallucinations
* Panic attacks
* OCD (inconsistently)
* Tourettes (inconsistently)
* PTSD (from events that are always changing)

### The Current Problem

My dilemma is that I feel like for anyone to go to these lengths to convince others they have these issues (even so far as hurting themselves and affecting their life) is indicative of a serious underlying issue (I think it's most likely BPD or Munchausen). I want to help her as best I can (which is why I let her move in with me) and help her get professional help. But she's so unpredictable, manipulative, and deceptive that it's hard for anyone to help her, let alone me. I'm also planning on moving out of the country in a year, which will more or less leave her on her own. 

When she isn't being ""ill"" she is a totally normal person and one of my best friends. She's an extremely talented artist, very funny, has great taste in music, clothes, and movies. She's a great listener and is very insightful. I love her dearly, which makes this all very overwhelming. I know I can't live her life for her or solve these issues alone, but I don't want to abandon her either. I feel like I can't talk to her about this because she'll either shut me out for not believing her or just completely ignore what I say. 

If anyone has any advice or experience they can offer, I would greatly appreciate it. Thanks, and sorry for writing a book, ha.",6.566280066583438,7.066354048314607,6.469463171036207,78.03506034124014,65.25842696629213,9.289221806075739,31.59384103204328,9.150863307647796,2.639495838535164,7466,269,1364,120,108,2358,573,1780,0.133,0.746,0.121,-0.978,7,3,3,0,1,0,265.0,18,1,11,6,75,85,15,7,69,1,146,26,8,22,24,259,247,103,0,26,47,31,9,14,1,13,13,8,7,8,127,84,1,6,32,5,1,23,38,42,2,15,61,28,195,43,211,156,38,220,0,6,9,4,220,97,0,31,104,951,322,13,0.05412107574867983,0.032062312409193584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02644324442390901,0.023987534086176647,0.0,0.027097219794554126,0.08407966861978391,0.029861976447235643,0.043280604722813164,0.1125826764297127,0.0,0.0,0.018402093699934608,0.0,0.020701237405920742,0.0,0.02683678218790769,0.132449500894083,0.027726718918678138,0.022268516963326133,0.14453769525212254,0.07589385002523014,0.1847116105088987,0.0,0.02080788327804965,0.0225944188056517,0.06598341088546318,0.0,0.18421219702617656,0.12195183818420915,0.056796729993210684,0.0,0.0,0.030058157216809787,0.10224540046108402,0.0,0.027631834719213696,0.030950046318699357,0.0,0.02779862656516854,0.02862646097177681,0.023310257274968986,0.0851173773389021,0.029242828009959813,0.0,0.021605637556653116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0233072016189744,0.027465876322607698,0.0,0.0565450050735861,0.0,0.027697607167556745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045211214123264926,0.0,0.023967604563491986,0.0,0.12071861144010798,0.07149292020796225,0.02447780575237134,0.0,0.025857503592805885,0.0,0.0529407971024294,0.025510266781731114,0.0,0.02736524205490827,0.038664107328759134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02301767969203135,0.0,0.0,0.020906904435148484,0.0,0.056552056627320324,0.0,0.07689563642163702,0.0,0.02164278416528977,0.08950301561565176,0.0,0.02679418694730054,0.16750680991436034,0.0,0.04848185340817287,0.0,0.02777191882443851,0.028764086352624174,0.0,0.0,0.14510486500410227,0.02859094399086548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690659642151219,0.0610961068802781,0.0,0.16946502595411336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028179386008364362,0.11897411137226835,0.022057950089465074,0.0,0.057306404751417274,0.0,0.08301370015213941,0.05734097452748022,0.18508576694772225,0.054243536016932034,0.09557980286031374,0.07184317341997329,0.09089614577531377,0.0,0.0,0.06901770482031568,0.024423191945528763,0.0,0.10837871495785316,0.0,0.0,0.05895371762734208,0.0,0.0,0.16362394482540538,0.0,0.0,0.19015784942210867,0.021599463158707567,0.11504427692087292,0.0,0.04013009190198534,0.06261226511380323,0.0,0.0,0.025394481663959304,0.053027163241285605,0.02596531591717152,0.0308086017259734,0.0,0.057637179351511386,0.12835844557114215,0.06174227534392066,0.0,0.12699884270775594,0.060095049821409736,0.029303925487744895,0.0,0.018760369722592724,0.09451287159308086,0.0,0.0,0.10232382012028464,0.0,0.051833030120102916,0.055060590914355514,0.029175836695735383,0.07767984042082836,0.03163232066931606,0.05440662946884914,0.06062799102857608,0.0,0.0,0.1540040820334274,0.05200702046092785,0.027822739861040068,0.13359508271648382,0.05810578110689878,0.03065431427503306,0.023109551488419342,0.025740768319317684,0.08607850339254211,0.0,0.2190936721759952,0.0431274902923993,0.07390469207422165,0.1129201707478182,0.15285352661065674,0.0,0.08953902626214602,0.060834356725699326,0.0,0.0,0.02292830592616367,0.0624975723417948,0.05352712778776792,0.030292056671456742,0.13407511591097304,0.0,0.0,0.06787146406087298,0.03099775470704258,0.028289549658944486,0.0309778416891556,0.0,0.0,0.1785296568877791,0.0,0.0,0.02175023530843797,0.11826051421830396,0.024913707576768997,0.0,0.0,0.1078669136496486,0.06935720005299129,0.05317368213536745,0.0,0.09467530349765188,0.0,0.0,0.12928751796402946,0.0,0.05511698674895709,0.0,0.07930264035986884,0.0,0.13020198074673014,0.04674323263179685,0.029803359384590975,0.1339666665307139,0.09576603811587747,0.064438186200876,0.04341266243262648,0.0,0.04866134677796628,0.0250853897174409,0.02441792643417543,0.0,0.0,0.026085392853317717,0.0,0.019700393861970054,0.0,0.0,0.15378423760935925,0.02958645013118752,0.0,0.05227829752947085
mentalhealth,MischiefManaged97,2020/03/15,"Is there any good book about this problem? Hey guys!

Lately I've been feeling extremely anxious, and today I realized that more than 75% of my anxiety comes from **things that will happen and that I can't control or change**. It has really been ruining my mind. Do you guys know any good book that might help specifically with this? Thank you!",1.9958680555555544,4.84410615625,2.6708333333333343,88.57972222222223,89.0,6.594444444444445,21.17361111111111,7.793537801064563,1.3461652777777782,270,9,51,6,9,84,50,64,0.127,0.687,0.18600000000000005,0.6622,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,1,0,12,13,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,8,4,0,1,3,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,1,6,3,5,9,1,3,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,2,2,32,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881022382992893,0.0,0.16204875731699844,0.2393066999144053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240872048321723,0.18247209816877308,0.0,0.0,0.2375844587108385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10710720769301553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3553445636515116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4194884211981986,0.1873198609649521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198464682019654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641578787493227,0.0,0.238952562931432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247173048874175,0.2138871051201865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20269193513971168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13570320897890992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950238661491713,0.0,0.0,0.14072990718537254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20078931197016514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pinpenhens,2020/03/15,"UK mental health services I'm very keen to hear from any other UK people and to hear their experiences, especially those with paranoia, anxiety and delusions. Would also particularly like to speak to anyone who has had a schitzo effective diagnosis.

I've been suffering with various issues (paranoia, feelings of persecution, thinking my partner is cheating etc etc.)  for about a year and a half now and would really like to connect with others going through the same, or similar, mental health issues. 

I went to see my doctor a few weeks back, have been put on sertraline 50mg in the short term and also been referred on. Currently awaiting my referral to come through. Do any of you have any experience with the timescales and what I can expect? Is there any benefit to going private to get a quick diagnosis?",7.836796934865903,8.842348986206899,8.108505747126442,65.62429118773947,62.58620689655172,11.134099616858236,38.180076628352495,10.980518767755715,4.672019157088123,653,32,101,17,9,214,96,145,0.07,0.8320000000000001,0.098,0.634,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,1,1,7,6,1,0,8,0,13,3,0,1,0,20,24,9,0,3,1,0,1,2,1,2,3,3,0,1,5,11,0,0,4,0,0,5,0,2,0,1,5,5,7,4,23,17,6,16,0,1,1,0,7,4,0,1,9,75,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22490007953459026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38249302321201695,0.0,0.10757035325345142,0.0,0.0,0.09832151797115612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10812451984325384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112766789390494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392576293228054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136465570208985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275097576737072,0.0,0.0,0.07109934292794412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734657135383384,0.0,0.15982988091636846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989350703334869,0.3169674245249076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29353177217601994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373951086135701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834143872732624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748497438358301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413572589052059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008179000677242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205222361155387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010063461516464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602238520272055,0.0,0.0,0.11279314714334016,0.0,0.0,0.13035183262203626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19977821180535013,0.0,0.0,0.09055167125944874
mentalhealth,godawsp,2020/03/15,"Help to diagnosis: Specific Activities Leading to Physical Symptoms Hi,  
I suffer from some specific physical symptoms (coughing, diarrhea) and impaired cognitive function after doing some specific activities e.g. computer programming, studying specific subjects (e.g. advanced math) and hard physical activities.  
I haven't been able to put a diagnosis to this link between activities and symptoms, and thereby not been able to recover. **I hope for your help to point me in a direction to find a diagnosis or an effective recovering strategy/method.**

I started having these symptoms during my time at the university. They were intensified during my (stressful) final thesis (constant diarrhea and coughing leading to daily vomiting).  
It is now four years since I graduated. The symptoms have slightly eased, primarily because I avoid the activities that trigger the symptoms. This also means that I avoid specific activities that I used to love, which is unfulfilling.

Thanks in advance, M.",8.027298387096774,11.871988451612909,8.742963709677419,49.63444556451614,67.70967741935485,12.391129032258064,46.461693548387096,11.333407214811013,7.777524193548388,810,57,88,33,16,270,96,155,0.057,0.805,0.138,0.9202,0,2,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,1,5,2,7,0,3,8,0,9,10,0,5,0,20,15,7,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,9,0,0,0,8,5,0,2,4,0,0,5,2,4,0,1,3,1,13,3,16,12,2,16,0,1,0,1,6,4,0,4,7,66,21,6,0.2594061953177533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372352033736516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906580447222332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14016297069963798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14208340364797212,0.1185462814904779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618849921764487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17387450467357235,0.0,0.0,0.1288244417141225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706210958416426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14128469711652966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226113510337453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13038743738312686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729174269825126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180452010113284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857446014721976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8088670853800967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194131861635506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563091928957245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120218322172102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352454240921926
mentalhealth,nervousnever,2020/03/15,"Is this a type of eating disorder? (TW) So essentially, I have some odd habits. I think I’m fat but I have a bmi of 16.8 or so. That’s so bad because some people have way lower and want to get lower. I’m a teenage male, if that is of any interest. I typically eat 1,000-2,000 calories a day, which shows I can’t really be anorexic, right? Even though I’m a fat pig who can’t control themselves around food. I typically eat on my own terms I hate when my parents make me eat. My caloric intake is mainly just junk food. I started taking laxatives to make me skinny and go number 2 more. I exercise solely because I want to burn calories off. But my weight fluctuates a couple pounds. Like, I can’t lose weight cause I’m fat and can’t control myself. That’s got to change. Is this a problem, or should i just disregard everything? Thanks!",0.911941176470588,3.3038848411764725,2.856764705882356,89.72044117647059,85.88235294117645,5.988235294117647,22.029411764705888,7.365786028017652,0.9370235294117646,653,23,136,11,20,218,101,170,0.187,0.723,0.09,-0.9620000000000001,3,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,3,9,7,1,0,7,0,13,13,4,5,0,24,29,13,0,5,7,1,2,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,7,4,12,3,1,2,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,2,19,3,10,26,6,10,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,5,5,77,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934034353411416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695270076342465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969366697973856,0.16017146451332426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495958055672405,0.13897863466446428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946992329513635,0.0,0.14536530301671025,0.0,0.08472680181096459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15056854493979555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5377227379530434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677276286854052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807248704669425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177213248934714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863865939699333,0.0,0.07466414078967333,0.0,0.1050735749904667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12970683119812104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418379138193721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14697640000635773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17538931138317235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458777594356975,0.0,0.0,0.09107973816312996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570931224883092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416297895098585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219458516842674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298877391873753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877857725436827,0.0,0.0,0.12095358440789344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418058537709408,0.12907648190500184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497821214774718,0.10428033870808827,0.0,0.3199617177013639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GISHMAN_THE_FISHMAN,2020/03/15,"(NSFW, Trigger Warning) I accidentally viewed child pornography. I was browsing the deep web out of curiosity (which I now majorly regret) and I came across a child pornography website. There were a bunch of videos on the home page that all played at once. Once I saw them my mouth dropped, I was disgusted and horrified. I wanted to look away but I couldn't for some reason, it's like I was frozen in shock and sheer disbelief that people could do this to innocent children. Now I can barely stop the images from flashing in my head and I feel traumatized. I don't know what to do, please make it stop! :'(",3.8562608695652174,6.014988408695654,4.3889130434782615,84.07902173913047,73.6086956521739,8.078260869565218,26.28260869565217,8.841846274778883,2.0317130434782604,477,17,92,10,10,151,80,115,0.18600000000000005,0.723,0.091,-0.8863,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,3,5,1,0,5,0,10,2,2,3,1,20,17,5,0,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,7,6,0,2,3,2,0,1,2,3,0,0,6,4,15,2,14,9,5,14,0,1,3,0,4,8,0,1,5,62,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261606442924847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753150232795476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19219217139864345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171326297572625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24704410452040035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414578157870296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132291240798279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11760169853615746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021408484535292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067982647681936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5127094548269377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16688219376873584,0.0,0.0,0.2642339272137418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24749618122267644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4024987774497884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198055764746512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,megamegazoomzoom,2020/03/15,I can’t stop repeating thoughts in my head like “maybe I can stop repeating thoughts in my head” or “I can stop and i don’t want to”. What is this? How can I stop? Idk if this is the right sub red. But any help would do.,-2.069795918367348,-0.2280600204081616,-0.09673469387754884,108.22387755102044,98.18367346938774,4.4326530612244905,15.16326530612245,6.1826913282559595,-0.9925591836734692,165,4,47,2,7,53,31,49,0.207,0.6659999999999999,0.127,-0.4696,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,9,2,2,1,0,13,12,5,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,7,1,3,9,0,9,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,2,7,28,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14612011326099286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4410406761613733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440239603632428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497545112603524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21586748711355325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18349924394258346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7185693959595044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3411682311047615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267368862498718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15263867921530888,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mr-Puck,2020/03/15,"Living with someone who need help. Living with a my housemate Today :

Seriously living with someone paranoid and that always has to be right even when wrong is fucking exhausting . 

Yesterday / This morning so far I been told that:

1) -26 degrees in Calgary is warmer than +4 degrees in Ottawa ..... 

2) That vaccines cause Autism and there’s proof about it ....

3) That the CRA (canada revenue agency) is a kabal running the world ...... 

4) Corona Virus is made up for more tax money.

5)She know and can predict everything that going to happen with the government because she worked there before ......

6) Shit fell off her closet shelves because doors where open in her bedroom . Not her fault she never opened her own door she says .... ( cats would not be able to open those 2 heavy doors) so now its my fault ......

Seriously i don’t know how to deal with this person anymore.....

As soon as she gets told somethings she does mot like or proven she is wrong she start speaking loudly accusing whoever of being after her. 

If confronted she goes into victim mode right away....

I’ve called the cops on her before and even her parents tried to get her into hospital but now they got a restrictive order for her not to contact her family anymore...

Im tired and trapped :/",3.1623580786026224,5.952091296943233,3.5439720524017484,85.96904104803494,79.26200873362444,5.760069868995633,24.44384279475982,7.087006719466742,1.2253292925764194,973,35,170,12,25,302,154,229,0.11599999999999999,0.85,0.035,-0.9508,1,1,1,0,0,0,65.0,0,0,1,1,13,12,4,0,7,0,13,4,1,3,2,31,26,14,0,3,6,1,0,1,0,1,2,3,5,1,11,15,0,1,2,0,2,3,5,11,0,0,5,3,23,1,28,17,2,30,0,0,0,1,30,17,2,2,10,108,34,3,0.13270450047155186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11042077512821656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632144114095516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468024655804975,0.0,0.0,0.16179086353763278,0.0,0.2258435115059788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550613223408375,0.0,0.0,0.1363240771213195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368125129511083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613060264250262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17530014199101665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926624818824387,0.0,0.12510199264648678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268317231411767,0.1386652486402308,0.0,0.07541902579439635,0.0,0.10613591181392763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735015150365022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894902937526637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433436327158891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586184587331275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483271576716493,0.0,0.3515415155266033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556820700676852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983987056070358,0.10234989173661314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735264325483646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587245116055975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266578366352669,0.0,0.10553194514361364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136219262719134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248801852143296,0.10216240781829936,0.0,0.0,0.09392892846007984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252430167140915,0.12578834971707128,0.25360967425399805,0.0,0.09009764486799343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661045684626224,0.0,0.0,0.09426946965686586,0.2901830779283053,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,extraaacount99,2020/03/15,"What’s wrong with me? I’m 20 F. I’m in college. Growing up, I was very shy. I had untreated social anxiety disorder that really got in the way of my ability to make friends, have a boyfriend as a teenager, and that sort of stuff. I finally got therapy and medication when I was 18 and I overcame it thankfully. 

Now I feel like I probably have depression. I feel like my brain just can’t ever let me be fully mentally healthy and happy, something always has to be wrong with it. 

Last semester of college was the closest I’ve ever felt to truly happy and mentally healthy. I had just transferred to a new college, I made a lot of new friends, joined a sorority, I had my first boyfriend. I just was having a really good life. It was really great. 

Then my boyfriend dumped me, my friend group dynamic changed some, I got used to the college so even though I still really like it it doesn’t have that exciting “new” feel anymore. I started to get depressed. I think a lot had to do with getting dumped. He really led me on and played with my emotions, made me really like him and think he liked me too, then dumped me and it was hard on me. Especially because I go to a small college so I have to see him around. And every time I see people post pictures with him my heart just sinks. Even though I wouldn’t get back with him now because he’s not the person I thought he was and I don’t think I really have the same feelings for him now I hate seeing him around or seeing pictures of him because it reminds me of everything and puts me in a bad place mentally. 

I didn’t like my class schedule that much. I started sleeping a lot and not eating very well or very much. I’ve always struggled with my self esteem and feeling like people don’t like me, especially guys, and so I guess once I felt like this one guy didn’t anymore it did hurt my self esteem deep down and it just didn’t help my already deteriorating mental state. 

I started to feel really sad and hopeless. And that’s where I am today, still feeling that way off and on. Classes got moved online because of the Corona virus so I’ve moved home and will have a month of basically spending it with my family doing my school work. I have good and bad days, but today has been a bad day. 

Any advice? I’m on an SSRI but it’s mainly used to treat social anxiety disorder and OCD so I was thinking I might need it switched.",2.614035714285716,4.492729141666668,4.084226190476191,86.13625000000003,76.33333333333334,7.321428571428572,26.220238095238088,8.192908349453996,1.6890863095238098,1868,71,381,33,42,619,203,480,0.1,0.7759999999999999,0.124,0.6414,0,0,1,0,0,1,43.0,0,0,0,2,28,38,4,1,19,0,40,6,3,6,2,74,81,36,0,2,11,0,10,9,3,3,2,0,1,5,21,31,1,0,14,1,1,6,10,15,1,2,26,14,64,23,41,49,8,54,0,5,4,0,23,17,0,9,36,250,85,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586764467823021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626246929958078,0.0,0.09992648884135136,0.0,0.0,0.04083347165565139,0.0,0.09187034960642317,0.0,0.11909938104518104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690768812304033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04617181750636136,0.15040819402192926,0.14641441251569834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703141206252722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352091244361031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744965652389617,0.0,0.1034353994930832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13763628320242896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061442248009771334,0.0,0.06754388735145445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931989094539676,0.10863044213121764,0.050591509038692084,0.0,0.05396564824370149,0.0,0.0566062086491617,0.0,0.21252812256416634,0.12869104106661186,0.1153075273561457,0.06577767156172114,0.0,0.051075262772233614,0.0,0.0,0.13917462386300336,0.0,0.0941149756794528,0.0,0.034125636370141384,0.10072779894740308,0.19209770978742072,0.06620114194306825,0.0661476534342819,0.11891034695173938,0.0,0.1278405822134743,0.05378959642410437,0.05928318613695994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115503015808022,0.04024769877315092,0.0,0.06023122942871768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642806936270801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04894566316457489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06140130261745114,0.04241240328871949,0.2640198403346452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531473830898105,0.0,0.11363432308567435,0.040081301413030186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049022425852482,0.2420497660813381,0.06369952384835302,0.0,0.0,0.04792829995597218,0.1276392050109512,0.0882817246226595,0.04452349273235758,0.0,0.17397896783892358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394723795396169,0.040688855723685774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325694215107192,0.05243002136360169,0.06273549356911348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057507656485937475,0.0,0.06473995406019792,0.0,0.0,0.060363010821526064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077370405801488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060769955029375725,0.19139617275618204,0.0,0.12528255389762344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0600895596202009,0.12241906796540852,0.0,0.046226494484425035,0.0,0.0,0.1275030175808981,0.0,0.09590593774582136,0.0,0.0,0.06277332041591316,0.06873852732158874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055282468873462984,0.06866805703318903,0.0,0.0,0.153900708726922,0.11799016338607485,0.0476699715861223,0.035013419169393184,0.0,0.11383354364049322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372126649756044,0.0,0.1486331982051435,0.0,0.0953237493037511,0.0,0.0,0.053988740541815884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04371434508948193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13130217599397198,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HodrickMoltenheart,2020/03/15,"Venting. I lost my no self harming streak, it was going so so well. At every family thing my brother always humiliates me by making fun of everything I like, or pulls my pants down or hitting my privates. 
I was invited to my sisters and he starts poking fun at me for me being fat, losing my job, my self harming and everything I said. Then he kicked me so hard I fell to the ground he kept saying ""you have nothing dont there"" and laughing at me in front of everyone. I went straight home and cut my arm.
I'm so sick of being the family joke, I'm so sick of never fitting into anything. 

My ex girlfriend just used me for money and cheated on me for an underaged boy. 
I loved her so much I never saw the bad in her when we were dating, she came in an out of my life for over 2 years. She would just cut contact suddenly no explanation I thought I upset her, I got so excited for the random texts asking for phone credit or money.
Then suddenly wanting to see me, she told be she was dating another guy during time she cut me off.
I went 3 months without hearing from her suddenly she wanted me see me she invited me to a skate park. Like the moron I am I went, got there she was hanging around teenage boys no older than 15.
She was 22 and she didnt have a car or ID, she want me to buy them alcohol I said no the only time I said no to her. She demanded I stay and I did and she ignored me except when I was going to leave.
I felt like shit, late that night she came up to me and asked if I wanted to play hind and seek. After half an hour one of the teenaged boys came up to me and told me she was having sex with one of the other boys. 
I got up and tried to leave she got angry at me and she made me feel like I was doing the wrong thing. Said she wanted to talk after she had a walk. 2 hours I sat then a text she'll call me the next day.
3 weeks later she did what always did and cut contact, haven heard from her since.

I know I was an idiot for staying with her for as long as I did, she was my first girlfriend and only.
My mind always makes relive that almost every night. 
I started LARPing a year ago, to he social again try and meet someone. I've probably done something weird without  knowing but all the women just didn't want anything to do with me. I just wasn't making friends. Until I met Rob, he said lets start a faction ""Drunken guard"" he said we go 50/50 kept asking for money I kept giving it. There was always an excuse on why he can't pay his half. I couldn't afford anymore, he start not talking to me, then he asked if he could pay me out for my half, he never did. The LARP group got super toxic no one role played with me found out Rob was gossiping about me. November last year I stopped going. I wanted to kill myself had plans. I've been pushing myself so hard this year to get better, I went a month with cutting myself.

Why does my mind kept hold of everything bad thats happened, why do I hate myself so muc, why did my brothers humiliation of me set me so so so far back?",1.7638929910923586,3.3205570079113973,3.5377355836849524,90.54434833567743,77.8132911392405,6.0738865447726225,21.672058134083446,6.775458762138228,0.4095649554617915,2327,63,510,22,54,780,282,632,0.146,0.774,0.08,-0.9895,2,0,2,0,0,2,60.0,2,1,1,6,27,39,11,1,24,0,43,9,3,5,4,83,113,44,1,12,15,4,4,4,3,2,5,9,1,8,10,31,2,8,6,3,7,18,18,22,1,7,59,16,116,17,74,45,2,91,0,2,3,2,90,24,1,8,50,336,126,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05248556871678493,0.06327685164613768,0.059289670478487315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970678863060434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062086228053276314,0.0,0.0,0.0587198238301837,0.0,0.0,0.09744859751741453,0.05270892726382605,0.22141121947592887,0.0,0.0,0.045528380854715285,0.09887476691680787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052365910788215585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060459426747073865,0.20315937149002986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04727389528976845,0.0,0.0,0.038185170627093146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051814552949005915,0.06059178262433588,0.06939298655067598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977296177309884,0.05657712780267865,0.15964079728758745,0.0,0.1116347228811358,0.0,0.02993805630800603,0.04229921372464395,0.0568503180556279,0.0,0.0,0.050363493172616236,0.0,0.06492006101779145,0.045745042631063576,0.0,0.030934472500647812,0.056799060472854435,0.1346002867966166,0.0,0.2367758668833885,0.0,0.0,0.058626623944782276,0.05235868496590725,0.0,0.10608000136363048,0.05845703337003408,0.0,0.0,0.06673330731654853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05939186501377342,0.0,0.11661868236357326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05875620241589406,0.0,0.06550643861647361,0.0,0.06507988561385833,0.04826357102872012,0.0667907924972454,0.12538843024409466,0.0,0.06054563241219148,0.041821356710217424,0.11570690610421945,0.0,0.0,0.05239846388293926,0.0,0.06624018365428691,0.06463406440168297,0.0,0.053438803444118166,0.056025374557754325,0.11856822112105453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11956924906487153,0.0,0.0945207709795654,0.0,0.04352572844438896,0.0,0.13699783943351834,0.0,0.06296987834308419,0.11112803905666588,0.0,0.056813024962373365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036548396705188,0.09006284746768975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383775740609231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33793024149779793,0.0470856986447265,0.0,0.0,0.09436446644295264,0.0,0.12353665366360192,0.0,0.060777607626500925,0.04897863509888739,0.0,0.0,0.06035653620783388,0.05016794022777938,0.04558229587075131,0.0,0.0,0.1676348981713444,0.12621870417456596,0.0,0.04950171726806197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951805605183169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867220098971711,0.0,0.0,0.04700565710690103,0.06905096524520797,0.0,0.0,0.1131542556053573,0.0,0.08039860440515446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05113791896088712,0.0,0.0,0.2444627050412524,0.0,0.047494216560577264,0.0,0.053236369586610835,0.219550861888852,0.2137091292799218,0.0,0.0,0.11415151504848647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042060665456520194,0.06473619405260353,0.0,0.1525156729336776
mentalhealth,br2088,2020/03/15,"Auditory hallucinations upon waking and stress higher than usual? 32 F for reference. I’m so thankful for this forum. So for the last week, upon waking up I hear what sounds like a stapler or nail gun to the point where I get pissed because it sounds like something loud preventing me from going back to sleep. Once I get up to go to the bathroom it’s gone. I notice it happens more so when I’m coming out of a vivid dream. 

Aside from that, for whatever reason, I’ve been more paranoid of pissing people off lately. I got diagnosed with a serious genetic health condition that has limited my ability to work as much as I used to physically (however I’m still working PT at my current job (which is a hospital) and starting up a healthcare company with old coworker as well as continuing my career in web design on the side), but had to move in with a family member short term so I can make close to what I was prior to losing my health. For record, my health has been an issue for awhile but has only recently limited me as much as it has so its not necessary new stress. With that being said, I get overly paranoid about upsetting the family member I’m living with or pissing them off or if I visit my in laws I over worry about the same - this happens off and on. 

As mentioned, I work in a hospital, so with the virus, it’s been a madhouse at work but I don’t feel I’m stressed about the virus itself (I’ve been working at a hospital almost ten years so I’ve seen Ebola play out too), however, maybe I am. 

Long story short, I don’t necessarily feel more stressed than usual. 

Basically I’m worried I have beginning signs of narcolepsy or schizophrenia. I plan on scheduling an appointment with a mental healthcare professional soon, but am worried with these hypnopomic hallucinations and slight paranoia, I’m developing something more serious. I do have a history of OCD (irrational fears of schizophrenia, cross contamination at work, etc. - basically massive “what if” syndrome) for some reason (even though I have a good friend who actually does have schizophrenia who functions fine for the most part). 

Has anyone experienced something similar and come to find out it’s just underlying stress? I apologize in advance for how ridiculous this sounds. Thank you in advance.",5.778886274509804,7.2349395670588255,6.621588235294117,72.82148039215687,67.44705882352943,9.901960784313726,32.75490196078432,10.125756701596842,3.5528196078431367,1816,79,312,45,30,601,219,425,0.14800000000000002,0.784,0.068,-0.9864,4,0,3,1,0,0,47.0,0,1,1,12,21,23,4,7,23,0,23,10,6,5,0,49,52,32,0,2,12,0,2,2,1,0,4,6,0,0,21,19,0,3,6,2,0,10,3,14,1,1,10,11,30,9,73,41,12,64,0,1,2,0,10,33,3,9,23,216,51,9,0.0,0.0,0.08118437661441491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330578188928223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817048663232916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397028916919445,0.0,0.050713686470521296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14332682268177865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844391535248573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728027633114732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927821967608995,0.05494819821579375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685393088802396,0.09361526481119964,0.08412977062804655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603690358790077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427471283251644,0.0,0.1303947415225058,0.0,0.0945610090562259,0.06977834937030672,0.06653704958738214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14713460724535954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652908367098719,0.09376456808070743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683188777932717,0.0825562251164306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781340643097836,0.09384533843895622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128780447935871,0.0,0.0734609516259499,0.07362319554718058,0.0,0.09307169777258664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553197989912189,0.0,0.08357856002385411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383898645221055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842100327490557,0.12231286870369887,0.0,0.0,0.08034832706105875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094715792806667,0.08729706898394747,0.08859784007685235,0.0,0.06327203260636573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008992227580752,0.0,0.05767555786615044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864428441042252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17107253924934854,0.08214306048103667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791356031183165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325309057682641,0.0,0.0,0.19213812965275331,0.0,0.0,0.058884440372969776,0.0,0.06643804491557735,0.0,0.4764865569716747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531858917763063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173670951861267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185204924984671,0.18325069326555846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673241416029424,0.0,0.07480050669144098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36339301079029457,0.25345961854057864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053573570579718836
mentalhealth,Whatac0nt666,2020/03/15,problem with self harm im not going to go into detail since it doesnt seem necessary but since was 11 ive had problems with self harm . it doesnt help that i blend in with the wrong crowd and that by being who i am im just asking to be bulled. im just here to ask how i could cope with it because it just seems like when i frow my blades away i manage to get my hands on more.,0.7597176079734211,1.823444639534884,2.510730897009968,98.94406976744189,79.34883720930233,5.379401993355483,16.93687707641196,5.288315135182226,-0.8823401993355477,293,4,76,1,7,97,58,86,0.214,0.75,0.036000000000000004,-0.945,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,1,0,9,1,1,1,0,17,16,4,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,7,6,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,2,1,8,1,13,11,1,7,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,2,2,47,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3235009676952458,0.0,0.16255812599909866,0.0,0.0,0.10547147726487813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381425106565247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039588700869336,0.0,0.1966626765067656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597175915071638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5606743558374908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452890549615384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33111383251997617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150220919782277,0.36099550059478747,0.0,0.0,0.2862481113357488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18917037240022275,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MaxDanger69,2020/03/15,"Does therapy actually work? What if I don't have problems like I think I do? I live in the UK. I've been increasingly worried I may have mental health issues such as possible depression or anxiety and i might possibly be autistic. I have also recently found out my mom smoked during pregnancy. 
I have no friends and I'm on thin ice with my family. 
I don't know what to do.",1.262666666666668,3.7761363333333335,4.022666666666666,81.06466666666667,85.66666666666666,8.666666666666668,25.666666666666664,9.150863307647796,2.8176666666666668,295,13,58,10,9,104,55,75,0.16899999999999998,0.757,0.07400000000000001,-0.7106,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,0,12,1,0,0,0,12,16,6,0,2,2,1,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,1,11,2,6,11,1,6,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,4,2,39,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.2005425072768788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16434167744598766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721019159898245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17700051259288993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983815729116095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937311209884523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253248070317152,0.15877207664172094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21844141188257604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144930491929027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293976343899305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039899794235044,0.0,0.181464021039212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20709995262429895,0.218007537619371,0.0,0.24068409821361686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4633503369551149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966398168456675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029106583216462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350120239917481,0.0,0.0,0.13167882787988766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496095442454049,0.20869954505730912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,babyg0rl666,2020/03/15,"AfghjCRfghjkYFfghjkOvbnmRfghijHikjnh21EdfghjLP :) she is a good person she can 

hit a goal with out fort but on the otherhand

me i am not distorted from reality she needed 

help but i froze from space .",5.959545454545456,9.65575942424243,5.8638636363636385,67.71579545454549,75.96969696969697,8.148484848484847,20.37121212121212,8.841846274778883,1.746521212121213,163,4,27,4,4,51,27,33,0.0,0.715,0.285,0.8551,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,5,2,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,5,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,20,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5342271078571548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4269211069471248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4722759159371005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5561431694261777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Moon_lit_fields,2020/03/15,"Why would someone be forced to see a therapist? I need answers. Several days ago I was recommended to a therapist group by my boss. It was quite surprising to say the least. He said I HAD to go once my shift was over. I said I didn't need a therapist and I had work that needed to be done. He said that could wait; if I didn't go he would cut my pay for the month.

My group session is going to start in an hour and 50 mins. Help.

I live in Britain btw.",-0.3462708719851584,1.6376487142857137,1.8518923933209663,97.65349721706869,87.36734693877554,6.012615955473097,19.11317254174397,7.348242739294969,0.21980408163265253,346,10,87,6,11,116,61,98,0.07,0.855,0.075,0.10099999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,6,0,14,0,0,1,0,12,26,3,0,7,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,1,3,2,1,0,0,11,5,12,1,11,10,1,12,0,0,1,0,10,3,0,1,6,50,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479782691316766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141277136897087,0.0,0.0,0.09807034860602687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561688338805196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25926878481556737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192700720513684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975492639617116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427755512585102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213780743708315,0.0,0.0,0.33826627381411306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619459194529192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16174150077649754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4339503535528753,0.12092942900640845,0.0,0.0,0.12117735717954255,0.0,0.0,0.171791924498019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884549960590755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763349117088296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5296829768814451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372164145438039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070626402808957,0.0,0.0,0.2160474370642568,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MiiDoViic,2020/03/15,"I can't talk or say anything about my feelings or thought to my family or parents I'm a 23\[M\] and ever since I was a child I was never able to say my thoughts to the closest people to me which are my family. I have a family of 6 siblings and parents. I'm the youngest and I was always belittled and made fun of for anything I said or did. It made me go quiete and never say anything in order to not sound stupid and be humilated. Also, I was sexually abused twice when I was 8 and less and I've never said anything about it to anyone beside my ex. It is catching up with me, the fact that people who are suppose to give me an unconditional love, people who are suppose to be always there for me, I can't share the littelest thing about myself with them. Trying to say to them that I'm happy or I'm sad feels like choking. This made me feel so alone in this world and probably will result in me killing myself or atleast attempting for a bit of attention or sympathy without having to actually jst ask for it.",4.046023351648351,4.737750456730769,5.691785714285714,80.7175,70.875,8.442857142857143,28.79945054945055,8.634040054169528,2.095700824175824,797,29,161,13,14,273,107,208,0.1,0.8109999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.3244,2,1,0,0,1,1,16.0,0,0,2,1,8,8,2,0,9,0,17,1,0,4,5,35,35,19,1,0,9,3,3,1,0,1,0,8,0,1,12,11,0,0,6,0,0,2,7,3,0,1,13,11,25,5,28,19,2,14,0,1,0,1,19,6,0,7,6,118,37,0,0.11127508646281872,0.1318427816216476,0.10858843276351328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524743076526668,0.0,0.08898664644173468,0.18517957199677293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780612772943253,0.0,0.3662796596282814,0.0,0.10402718481021916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148357442267894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065468632454676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147007448641792,0.0,0.1687920814735556,0.07949494400285127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674520243087883,0.0632401959721937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845439869149554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310939639544365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05436338652400991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004301100021288,0.31587353199045337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25746661971482826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471156299966149,0.0,0.0,0.2314324023398821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997336364927025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116961779290818,0.35396166004068386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204790140705887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943869947345325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739262229904637,0.0,0.0,0.1766799782074095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554847941974296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726521248943677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,e11even360,2020/03/15,"I want to be alone I'm 16, and I live in a house with my parents and grandparents,
I just want to be alone right now and don't know what to do, I try to isolate myself in my room, but it hurts them, they didn't tell me it,but I saw it on their faces. Plus I live in India which has 1.3 billion other people and it's close to impossible finding a lonely park around me. I don't earn so I live off my parents. I appreciate all the love I receive from them but I don't know what to do when I want to be alone to figure some shit out about myself.",0.8461475409836083,1.9679236147540995,2.999147540983607,95.2897049180328,79.24590163934425,5.863606557377048,19.577049180327872,6.2581,-0.24368459016393465,419,9,106,3,10,143,69,122,0.158,0.7340000000000001,0.10800000000000001,-0.7269,3,5,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,4,1,6,4,1,0,3,0,10,3,2,0,1,21,18,9,0,3,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,7,9,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,2,1,23,1,19,13,2,13,0,2,1,1,9,10,1,1,2,75,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5301341938348461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518884327389799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15594406041765224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19687316731923807,0.18265279105380894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187537146776747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4519831241728092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15399167700656272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789077825057183,0.0,0.0,0.11828678255030813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457089882644394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751395076171354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14912985123935904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584013042398747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019092025855816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,majdyBrown,2020/03/15,"Blow off some steam Hi i am majdy 21 yo computer science student 

I feel depressed every single day and i am not able to deal with it usually i go to gym but since i am living with my bipolar brother and my mother with Tension depression i have to be the man of the house i have tried to search for a good therapist but none is trustworthy and whenever i try to follow a healthy diet “as i used to” my mother started feeling worse because she feels isn’t able to do her mother stuff “my family lives in a different country and visit us occasionally “
And i am living in syria ....any advice?
Thanks for reading this",1.9478814627994967,4.373075049180329,4.125737704918033,82.19813997477935,81.29508196721312,6.704665825977299,25.778058007566198,7.882392219407189,1.862304413619168,484,20,89,9,13,166,83,122,0.14,0.76,0.1,-0.7340000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,5,0,10,2,0,1,0,16,18,8,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,8,1,0,3,2,0,3,3,3,0,0,0,3,17,2,17,17,3,9,0,2,0,0,11,3,0,1,3,63,20,3,0.3306720982779573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156447369108656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243418302921276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078732096139524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662807378456407,0.17045420678073164,0.2848073937082325,0.0,0.0,0.17274098136599356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393027522849168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586411259667665,0.0,0.250796622711295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396428689642916,0.13867603370205525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907756022635012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379842814596733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16538079142196552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367676883833521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170257065605438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18927021996094248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15221922044841474,0.0,0.1919678963252283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22450464884413146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19887890982339568,0.1427972615181063,0.1820942996255048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849155912646435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Distinct-Awareness,2020/03/15,"🗣️🗣️🗣️ just need to chat right now, things are nad Well I think they mayb. Jump down the rabbit hole of my life. Can you help ....Alice..",-4.416874999999997,-4.455598937499998,-1.492499999999998,112.88750000000002,132.125,1.6,4.0,3.1291,-3.271825,102,0,30,0,8,34,28,32,0.0,0.833,0.16699999999999998,0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,3,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,14,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3028959328853291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191870554501209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4539896259203191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350746819710613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3859161665708964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002191960639212,0.2895562986364554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4063081972434736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Obsessivedepressiv3s,2020/03/15,"Numb & suicidal For the longest time I’ve felt so emotionally numb. There are things in my life that I should be happy for. That should make me not feel like this but a lot of the time I’m not really feeling anything but acting/feeling the way I think I should be. Everything I feel is more logical & not actually there, this happened so I should feel this way. Instead of an immediate emotional response. I can’t even remember what being happy feels like at times. I’m always anxious about everything & despite whatever good in my life I can’t feel it. There’s just this emptiness. If I could feel anything it would be sadness. Quite often there’s this wave of sadness that goes over me. I pretty much start to breakdown crying, pleading for the pain to stop, telling myself it’s okay, sometimes even hurting myself in different ways. It can last for minutes to hours but It never really goes away. There’s just always this sadness that follows me. I tried therapy but most times I didn’t even know what to say & even when I tried my best to tell my therapist how I felt or what happened the advice she gave me never really helped. It’s gotten a lot worse now & I’ve been thinking about killing myself for a couple weeks now. This isn’t the first time I’ve felt this way but I thought I was through all of that now. I keep thinking about how I would do it but I can’t imagine leaving my wife with such a burden & to hurt her like that but sometimes I can’t bear it & think she would be better off without me I just want to know what’s wrong with me so I can be better I don’t wanna feel like this anymore

I’m constantly anxious about everything that I can’t function properly, have panic attacks, emotionally numb, depressed, & suicidal again but a lot worse off Unsure how to tell my wife
Tried therapy but it didn’t help

I don’t know what good posting this would do but maybe someone has been in a similar situation idk",3.2979774489076803,5.2260404702842385,4.137641531595018,86.28530655391121,74.52971576227391,7.171529245947852,26.972750763448442,8.00094639256281,1.6775571059431529,1550,59,306,24,33,497,165,387,0.262,0.6629999999999999,0.075,-0.9977,1,0,0,0,0,2,41.0,0,0,0,5,30,27,2,1,13,1,36,6,0,4,3,68,67,19,3,12,19,2,11,4,0,8,6,1,0,0,32,2,0,2,22,0,0,1,16,15,0,1,11,12,42,12,35,41,8,34,0,6,0,0,12,9,0,7,23,210,74,0,0.0,0.0,0.057872412393357164,0.0,0.0,0.05795144589880063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869180615915064,0.5140492107428648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339938887349119,0.058813899918205466,0.0,0.0,0.09760472167174028,0.0,0.0,0.06746716812107177,0.05571831347359287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06223617217058141,0.10489961431528197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408684721814485,0.0,0.04734963364939421,0.06561904633566137,0.06514295545006832,0.0,0.0,0.051078680513696434,0.0,0.0,0.06196033946966265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001279635165184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566796430559383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15989656068600847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698741854681144,0.1271009461718378,0.17082419692426662,0.0,0.0,0.050444181432691616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948321534981458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104885139517425,0.12626099551157355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950080367535063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05840275962815955,0.0,0.1269728943501973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05271235969389821,0.06561138766235455,0.0,0.09777622690722952,0.04834089496568344,0.0,0.06279465865398524,0.0,0.0,0.08377671891903572,0.11589228222378795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125510783909538,0.0,0.0,0.03958606046832628,0.0,0.05957910985652149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04359546179836134,0.0,0.09147821742738953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310392412446893,0.06958078256590915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0567970970699065,0.060333762460786124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06307739063460341,0.0,0.0,0.11397550104987253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671801767890554,0.0,0.0,0.047161135491115516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666048379052403,0.0,0.0,0.05024831518895753,0.0,0.11730687809648385,0.0,0.041975867265715734,0.0,0.0,0.049581024861429526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973849095669807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555036367358119,0.0,0.13563920142945238,0.06885682789069604,0.03939912157038646,0.15199912545258887,0.0,0.047080965717299764,0.17290398260270295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079111868735372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03497919473525246,0.1882918753121687,0.04757030790088168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05716719962400647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087223447143952,0.1685122064267039,0.06483990907578717,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bobby2bundles,2020/03/15,"Universal perspective Everyone is a teacher, but that does not mean that everyone is correct.

There have been times in our lives where we have been a good example for those around us, while at other times we have not been a good example - if we recognize our own imperfections it helps us have compassion for all people and look upon all as equals.

Just because someone was wrong once, it doesn't mean they are going to be wrong forever. Similarly, just because we may perceive someone as wrong, it does not necessarily mean that we are right, in most cases we lack the perfect information required to make an objective and universal perspective.

It is important to remember that we are all imperfect and that we all live through the limited perspective of ego.

One may wonder, what is the right way to behave and live? As far as I know, it is to live in a manner that increases our personal freedom without harming others to do so - this is not easy, but we should certainly try.

Sending love to all beings. May we learn as much as we can from one another without making harsh and permanent judgments.",9.188811881188123,8.34967164356436,8.93651485148515,66.97061386138616,60.28712871287129,13.228514851485148,40.9920792079208,12.340626583579946,5.261548910891087,880,42,150,26,10,285,114,202,0.098,0.723,0.179,0.9714,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,16,0,1,3,6,9,0,0,8,0,26,1,0,2,8,55,36,16,0,3,11,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,16,17,0,2,9,0,0,3,7,4,0,2,4,1,18,5,26,26,11,17,0,0,1,1,22,10,0,6,3,124,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015833609367063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201001407057507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397068493677629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20055818055003904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189926413920736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512453327545496,0.1922264781574332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680772805473388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297604971119654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4047427358365969,0.0,0.09622732422839676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342257705158027,0.0,0.15298035877099808,0.0,0.0,0.3744685840443832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423734652803959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203535139494195,0.15529924246839075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944276028613806,0.1000561757703728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12980892043692802,0.1957196565272104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19418464970505128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336375126929334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779956064722494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756769961944369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095676071999867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22092268351409255,0.12426872169068913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3758608119528372,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jinrapslikejz,2020/03/15,"Would really appreciate any advice thanks guys I feel like I’m going to relapse again with my ED bc I’m having more depressive and anxious thoughts again and have been very critical of myself. I make sure I’m still eating but it’s stressing me out more, the voice in the back of my head is getting louder and telling me to stop eating any fats or carbs, which ofc doesn’t make any sense. 

I’m scared I annoy my partner with having mental health issues. He doesn’t really get that I can’t just be happier, less anxious or feel better about my body. Don’t get me wrong, he’s very supportive and has seriously helped me on my journey to loving myself, I’m appreciative of him. He tries his best...and it is enough. 

But what if my mental illness pushes him away...I’m too worried to talk to him about it bc I fear it’ll irritate him. However, if I don’t talk I’ll keep digging an anxiety hole. 

I’m so lost man.",1.8676344086021537,3.9701759784946304,3.6023655913978523,87.64021505376344,79.53763440860214,6.713978494623658,22.161290322580648,7.793537801064563,1.0332709677419365,716,22,148,12,18,239,112,186,0.225,0.639,0.136,-0.9540000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,2,10,14,1,3,3,0,15,8,3,2,1,23,35,11,0,3,7,0,2,1,1,2,3,1,0,3,7,7,3,2,3,0,0,3,5,8,0,0,3,3,23,6,15,29,4,11,0,2,0,1,16,3,0,4,6,83,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747084380675394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661243500386087,0.0,0.09979124186405608,0.2947349077676943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255881322393555,0.10030533306598467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368955900727685,0.11536935916251904,0.0,0.1448966927915426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235340904153766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669587416650357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347861407214032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678861763641424,0.1319153746716973,0.0931910303293876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20445879092205813,0.0,0.07413577171234613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12916257795507746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387577824917032,0.1386585662455304,0.0,0.0,0.08743556239743253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615229097085066,0.0,0.11594687354238035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372958766013495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239780188773546,0.0,0.1177330903819044,0.0,0.17414814945927595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629188508984648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16713478058276268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13059973764185429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417477097663327,0.10905914387238562,0.14942606456599816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802918151803893,0.12294431501885456,0.0,0.0,0.20969596644920246,0.11401602083893897,0.12009764294634168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355997739385593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856463420732594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21526410489942094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247478783600186,0.0,0.09266547543291936,0.14262280766345564,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,turnerm19,2020/03/15,"I have some questions I just need to know what changes did you guys see when you started taking anti depressants, and how do you know when they actually are working? How do I get over this anxiety of not wanting to take them and just better myself and my mental health. I’ve been cooped up in this house for 3 days just depressed my family doesn’t care, cause to them I’m such a horrible person. I have depression, and pretty bad anxiety. But I guess to them I’m just crazy. They make me feel like some sort of lunatic for showing my feelings, when I never really do. I need to get better mentally. So I can get by financially and soon move out. I want to get out of this hellhole. I’m just wondering. I need help.",1.4193749999999987,3.8186399652777774,3.161666666666669,88.42500000000004,83.375,6.655555555555559,22.19444444444445,7.865858978985527,1.207786111111111,561,19,115,11,16,186,88,144,0.182,0.7,0.11900000000000001,-0.8703,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,5,3,13,8,0,0,1,0,10,1,0,4,1,34,34,12,0,5,7,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,4,7,0,0,6,1,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,3,23,4,17,32,2,13,0,3,1,0,12,5,0,6,8,78,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.13545172574296652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123678620120622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589472457788967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455199844132899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14151893046147174,0.14258893743298878,0.14683519140283946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951646554090419,0.0,0.3586525153242778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085113487573685,0.0,0.1403659557805298,0.09916090580731493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900753979782428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290717622316685,0.1374368131907483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475411204088222,0.0,0.0,0.09303673901293144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601600499749266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525650204591588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781214476081207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265209421986516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797615963334684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14752564452633715,0.0,0.3087620435120003,0.10705344659049068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12119744389713705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121257275975835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554911498810054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892076939118915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060803670513047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982454925509814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087251948137598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373923588272887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505259551378526,0.10105025229229894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Apena11,2020/03/15,"I feel betrayed by my mom so today my family had a dinner together and we were all at my parents house, one of my uncles always has the tendency of “playfully” hitting me, and he came and hit me behind my leg obviously making it bent, so i turned and told him to stop it and just did a slight hit with the back of my hand on his back, and idk how he tripped and his beer felt off his hand, my mom started screaming at me for “hitting” my uncle when he had literally tripped me and made me clean the mess and also he said it was an accident and we could just clean it up, she didn’t tell my uncle anything and just kept on telling me i shouldn’t be hitting him because he is my uncle and he is an adult, keep in mind I AM ALSO AN ADULT I’M 3 WEEKS AWAY FROM TURNING 21 and i know that’s young but an adult none of the less. Also, I’ve been struggling with my mental health, idk what it is yet, but this issue was like my last drop, now i’m crying in my bedroom and feeling like if my own mother is putting others over me then who so i really have?",4.956056547619049,3.9023736830357163,6.018571428571431,85.15976190476194,68.86607142857143,8.895238095238097,28.934523809523807,7.793537801064563,1.5536113095238089,811,23,186,8,12,272,130,224,0.099,0.8240000000000001,0.077,-0.6187,1,0,1,0,1,0,13.0,2,0,0,0,15,6,0,1,10,0,18,6,3,3,2,40,39,26,0,3,6,4,5,2,0,1,1,2,3,3,10,19,2,3,4,2,0,4,3,3,0,1,14,7,35,3,21,17,4,28,0,0,0,0,26,11,0,1,14,132,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430115362422538,0.11896678136774512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11765636921120334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13432986334251634,0.2198781357104045,0.0,0.08715632663975813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635254868015615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415402622435475,0.0,0.1570514927283754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478425043260456,0.0,0.14458506725296208,0.102141478361265,0.13727856903701413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15197590254891374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16497413114237927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492289143373739,0.0,0.1270828859078588,0.0,0.0,0.07857540534268484,0.11654383289387935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970087627429692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528654741255,0.09543702530585524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14408532680073588,0.0,0.1443641475883614,0.33490154398790056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688366436388417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875698819993062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14372951945713955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091593544539477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13600211213640365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011985496682265,0.0,0.0,0.11953363048532105,0.0,0.14946867386692336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499331724136021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355237280486747,0.13661888641284595,0.0,0.0,0.3110318217235257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146860441588095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mymistag,2020/03/15,"Don't let COVID10 confinement affect your mental health So you are stuck at home too ?

Your things have been cancelled and your feel ... well, what do you actually feel ?

Just take a breath and read our new post, if should help you !

[https://mistag.com/2020/03/15/dont-let-covid-19-confinement-affect-your-mental-health/](https://mistag.com/2020/03/15/dont-let-covid-19-confinement-affect-your-mental-health/)

With love,

Mistag",20.14829787234043,27.08959531914894,8.914297872340427,47.89400000000003,42.61702127659575,6.313191489361702,20.038297872340426,7.554174236665415,0.4590204255319144,368,5,41,3,5,83,40,47,0.078,0.747,0.17600000000000002,0.7498,0,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,1,6,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,7,3,1,1,0,10,12,4,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,2,7,2,2,8,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,1,0,1,1,26,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.14860106873402365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3569366602446491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15399236095699975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4855922223516901,0.0,0.0,0.10206853233516623,0.0,0.15274694891706458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4671427956878436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743656943547405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4603803160630676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470707514202208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14583994301483413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523189083609935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449387909571385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101166537395168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13691593998420853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,exzakt,2020/03/15,"Discord chat for people with mental issues to relate Hey lurker here, thought I would invite some of you to an active real time chat if you want to discuss any mental health stuff or anything really.  
[https://discord.gg/RtRB9tM](https://discord.gg/RtRB9tM)",9.968684210526316,14.352323499999999,7.057105263157897,61.38723684210528,64.0,5.905263157894738,22.657894736842106,7.1686216300943375,1.3731368421052628,215,5,24,2,4,61,33,38,0.065,0.799,0.136,0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,3,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,6,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,3,1,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19051417453268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23054268696339345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977903632604801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924077558624196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5646582265854463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942233535980928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188763305054337,0.17947368262509306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32070904726642546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22241080462893895,0.16335991969716454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16524195559313262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990132044349164,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gefibo6141,2020/03/15,"I think I am too happy. I made this account just to make this post. I'd like to maintain my anonymity to prevent people bashing me for my 'non-issue'.

I think I am too happy.

I was recently told I failed my Spanish oral examination, yet I feel no disappointment or anger or any desire to improve. I was lectured by my parents about my lack of drive and my 'fear of failure'. And I am still quite content.

I have an assignment due tomorrow, which I have not even yet begun. However, I feel absolutely no stress or dread... I even have the time to create a Reddit account to make this post. 

I haven't done any homework or studied at home whatsoever this entire school year. I am behind in my homework, my assignments are garbage, I'm probably going to fail... yet I still feel the same.

I am most likely going to fail in life due to a lack of drive, and I don't really mind. I don't care enough to take my driver's license test or to study for my exams in a few weeks, because I am content as is.

To me, the future and the past don't matter, I only care about the 'now', and now I am happy.

When I moved schools recently, I thought that it would be a good opportunity to start over, make new friends and become a better person, with better grades and a better future. Instead, I made no friends, I sit by myself during lunch and tap away at my phone. And somehow, I am content. I feel absolutely no urge to make friends. Occasionally, a teacher or a student walks up to me and asks me if I am alright, because the sight of me sitting by myself day after day must be depressing or something. I am absolutely not depressed, I am sure of it. I tell them I am fine, but I am not sure if they believe me.

I am useless to society, I have no talents and my only hobbies are reading, watching anime and playing games. And still, I feel happy and content and complete.

I live an incredibly comfortable life right now, despite my future being so unclear. I don't get bullied; bullies practically don't exist at my school (it is a very good school). My parents love me very much and I am grateful to them. 

I think if I was less happy, I might have some drive or some reason to improve, and my life and future would be better. But I feel no urge to improve myself or to work hard because I am satisfied.

I need help, but I don't want it. I am posting here just to sate my own curiosity, wanting to see if anybody else feels the same way, or to see how people respond. Anybody relate? Is this a mental disorder or something? Am I just a special case?",3.8072681539807522,4.800073423228348,5.383412073490814,81.59962379702537,71.65748031496064,7.534208223972003,30.25284339457568,7.793537801064563,1.9945746281714791,1961,82,388,24,36,666,223,508,0.1,0.7140000000000001,0.18600000000000005,0.9944,3,0,2,1,0,0,72.0,0,0,3,10,24,39,1,3,20,1,47,5,0,8,3,85,80,40,0,13,24,2,8,2,3,4,3,0,3,1,11,19,1,1,13,3,2,7,16,11,0,0,8,12,80,28,48,64,12,52,0,7,4,1,17,10,0,21,31,285,91,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773251189214306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717801355539672,0.0,0.0675134425081216,0.0,0.0,0.13141285566878064,0.07936208679966597,0.0,0.08095994177315594,0.0,0.2542120763779192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465290951584377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534228829834941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268559799539447,0.0,0.12378327143324375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235608643754673,0.0,0.0,0.0735362120152328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0600285705802041,0.0,0.0,0.07424905743709379,0.0,0.09492374601990984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808608098997751,0.2543367784287148,0.05133573916809905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16655313680502354,0.0,0.03754310947559713,0.0,0.08167770280463528,0.12054303013363785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3824736397274852,0.06437111711348678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816524948147488,0.0,0.07207995190883855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750016227067574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15226738778462875,0.07021288374745005,0.0,0.06345238734796448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06485511747146913,0.13598853320605725,0.19186447334361756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241648420665449,0.07623053122365847,0.07255661798440892,0.0,0.0,0.0763742318240408,0.05282427841491679,0.05328218011488433,0.0,0.06940140385600828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930328105942892,0.0,0.0,0.1595807593173685,0.0,0.06859708579167062,0.09963529622832043,0.06274408565643394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20646178833865933,0.0,0.07747563547182988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643037846416388,0.07187796330667412,0.0,0.04603440627058122,0.07388252387690983,0.14190323365614624,0.0,0.0,0.06136678120685965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29089862369179537,0.11452386958270885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106403947239662,0.0,0.0,0.050861828449196636,0.0,0.17215891438855965,0.0,0.08231368886428769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354516044237408,0.0,0.05402866216042272,0.0,0.06280751147491666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13813210923539102,0.0,0.05704763611856675,0.04190127935011997,0.0,0.0,0.06866389277742925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858160492819615,0.08476803067121177,0.057037946350706276,0.05764056819634247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052313856477149985,0.0,0.0,0.10209245803803743,0.0,0.0,0.04627452921310938
mentalhealth,qwerty8228,2020/03/15,"I want to fucking kill myself and everyone I know tells me I should do it. I wish I was never born. The people I need to survive and get through life screw me over like they were getting paid to do it. My cousins tell me they are going to kill me and they wish I was never born. I slept at my cousins house one night, the cousin that I look up to and wish I was just alike. The person that I wish there was something I could have done or been to have her approval and like. She smeared poop all over me in my sleep bc in her jurisdiction I am “a lesbian” and unacceptable to her and have no right asking her to be my friend. All my other cousins and aunts and uncles agree with her and say she is ok to put me in situations where I will fail just to prove to me that I am “less than human.” The saddest part about it, she’s just in the list of terrible things people do to me and the whole setting me up to fail is standard in my book of interactions. It just really hurts when it is family bc aren’t they the ones who are supposed to help me but instead they are my worst offenders. I’d like to say more but crisis counselor just interrupted.",4.664751942618054,4.38633123430963,5.287104004781831,87.56273012552303,69.2928870292887,8.502211595935448,27.53167961745368,7.957251820313856,1.3408491332934855,891,25,205,10,14,288,123,239,0.155,0.75,0.096,-0.9646,1,0,1,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,5,4,10,15,5,0,8,1,26,7,3,0,5,36,41,15,2,8,8,5,0,3,1,2,1,2,0,2,11,12,0,0,3,1,1,2,4,10,0,2,9,3,46,5,31,28,7,21,0,3,1,3,29,12,2,1,9,157,57,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873251666109708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140314611722036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997019495214268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135870594757953,0.0,0.0,0.11972899680345615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981237364431903,0.1174140621991712,0.13270972556057753,0.0,0.07217985986660977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512876436617553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14654670079628826,0.1359614633352519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28102439733087353,0.0,0.06979861834679782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897073769638022,0.1861446613591793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665220046593844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417258718156687,0.19590814824501,0.0,0.0,0.11918557496807512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17212372964496744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753402232404405,0.0,0.17609853050666815,0.11089585418366947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12767508904351454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136264560723089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846156333683413,0.0,0.20199892352581267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275892455910458,0.12709670658705505,0.0,0.0,0.09777464243655318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220159099074316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437646869825657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491083080105079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14179653026103614,0.5841978599377348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,naradmoony,2020/03/15,"I am fed up with myself. I am tired of my poor decision making skills, poor self-confidence, poor attitude, poor social skills and dismayal mental acuity and intelligence. I am 31 M. Finished my PhD in mechanical engineering last year. Disastrous PhD. No further offers of postdoc or jobs. I am continuing with my PhD supervisor as a postdoc.

Currently, I am waiting for my work permit so that I can start getting paid. Not have been paid for the last 3 months.

Already in 1300$ debt in my credit card. Immigration processing will take more time, thanks to coronavirus; I am screwed.

I really like a friend who's 4 years older than me. I want to ask her out but feel pressured about what my Indian parents (living in India) will think about this. I am also ashamed of my broke ass and don't want to ask her out like this. I never had a long-term relationship. I am not able to get myself out to date as well.

I am dumb for all the career and life decisions I have taken so far. I funked my 3 exams during my undergrad. Probably that was a sign to accept the fact that I am dumb and I shouldn't go for further studies. I still did my master's and PhD degree. Asshole me.

I am just fed up of not being happy.",2.8836979477983635,4.8482600794979085,4.6971069934249865,81.65739191073921,75.82008368200837,7.899661287108987,24.77007371986452,8.704169506293173,1.8662215979278736,945,32,184,20,21,321,143,239,0.185,0.725,0.09,-0.9763,4,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,4,8,15,3,2,7,0,23,6,1,2,3,32,42,13,0,3,6,1,1,2,1,3,2,0,0,0,7,11,2,1,5,0,8,1,7,7,1,0,9,1,35,8,30,29,2,27,0,1,0,2,10,12,4,1,16,123,42,10,0.1709866532976643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886880237664547,0.1367379648663658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196988786635614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645598948138791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210386418704298,0.0,0.17866693826833935,0.0,0.09717565545803417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820184719192623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16967786972450813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27875388744441565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077292990022928,0.16707088386354574,0.0,0.1509843474825444,0.15131780753224205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141349188093134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17231433003398985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13647991535436885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13187544801597262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18986044358088905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18435253197585103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953842846597046,0.0,0.0,0.18357567567303248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17837637019291153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17429936017997427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210252332675615,0.0,0.136550162195979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285606837282845,0.0,0.0,0.15742153757512126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956134329468538,0.0,0.0,0.0997036925761096,0.19652400481284613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017047164527813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537375359861448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448032004191174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22021959741211825
mentalhealth,beepbeepmeepmeep,2020/03/15,"I did it again after being self harm free for a month Just when I thought I was getting better at coping my mental health and stop having self harm tendencies, I did it again last night. I’m so disgusted of myself how I kept telling myself that I’ll not do it again because my boyfriend and my family would be so upset to know that. My boyfriend knows about it but my parents don’t and neither do I wanna tell them about it. I started to get tattoos and hoping that it would maybe allow myself to like my body more and also curb with my self harm tendencies. Right now, I’m just thinking of the appropriate timing I can cut myself again without anyone knowing. I wish I could just stop craving for it.",5.120492063492062,5.732562700000003,5.479523809523809,83.48325396825399,68.42857142857143,7.650793650793651,28.41269841269841,7.3871296695380915,1.5619603174603176,558,18,108,5,9,178,84,140,0.162,0.748,0.09,-0.8642,1,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,1,1,15,10,2,1,2,0,13,2,1,2,0,29,26,11,0,6,6,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,3,10,6,0,4,5,0,1,0,4,6,0,0,5,0,22,5,14,16,2,16,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,15,83,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776786259222198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117147688341768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973941957300824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14130341699276905,0.0,0.17746824591055005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756319595048296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506167615602249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16694626719618014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698278411879832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586874752603276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634159344213929,0.1302337226638307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780554608718228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051025276053082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16101039432589262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752674130141564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993314740499591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17740547104711402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644254825228444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5000242817445915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308589673272935,0.0,0.0,0.267149437170153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792917192816462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237404563666938,0.0,0.12683938591382782,0.09316306342171532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18372740130504356,0.15401239936881356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22699178379739035,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FaZeVbucks,2020/03/15,"Why do I want to die but not through suicide? I want to die, my life is just too bleak , but I don’t want to commit suicide because I think it’ll be worse on my loved ones. Instead, I hope its through some accidental means like a car crash or getting shot. Idk help me out. I’m 17 if that helps.",1.6021874999999994,2.650913593750001,2.8613750000000024,97.34612500000004,77.125,5.745000000000001,25.3,5.6839178017228535,0.2764100000000003,226,8,57,1,5,73,49,64,0.2,0.41100000000000003,0.389,0.955,0,0,0,0,0,5,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,1,15,14,4,4,5,6,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,8,3,7,12,1,3,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,4,1,33,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266140713624466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4517181509859132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113699417898412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917372005392945,0.0,0.0,0.21614946974125251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15371407783255364,0.10631996287152196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19641391475664088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23705604276601755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746747297132512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4760900821639742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394445002249335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3850803467668105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963715689526849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221777175056158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dragonwysper,2020/03/15,"Looking for information on several stress/PTSD/depression -related disorders for help in accurately portraying a fictional character As the title states, I'm working on writing a character for a fictional story. I want to portray him as accurately as possible in regards to his past, and I'm having a bit of trouble finding good information for some of the details of PTSD and related disorders, and I'm having some difficulties understanding how some of it works. Specifically, I want to better understand what happens during PTSD flashbacks and how they work, how dissociation works, how isolation affects people, particularly children or people who experienced extreme isolation as children, how children respond to traumatic situations and how they're affected by PTSD, and what other disorders and symptoms can be caused by severe PTSD/DESNOS.

If you have information you'd like to share, you can reply to this post, DM it to me, or you can DM and ask for other social media accounts I have (Currently Gmail, Discord, Office 365, and Flight Rising) and talk to me through there.

The disorders and topics I need details, advice, and firsthand accounts on the most are:

\- PTSD and DESNOS (C-PTSD) 

\- Dissociative disorders 

\- Effects of sensory and social isolation

\- BPD (Borderline personality disorder)

\- Somatic symptom disorder

Some other disorders and topics I'd also appreciate information on are:

\- Acute stress disorder

\- ADHD (Attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder)

\- Agoraphobia

\- Antisocial personality disorder

\- Bipolar

\- Depression

\- Self harm and suicide

\- Schizophrenia

Information you share won't be given to anyone else in context, and will only be used to better design a fictional character. If I mention any info given, it won't be accompanied by any usernames, defining personal information, or links or references to this post or any replies made on it. 

I don't work for any organizations, nor am I doing any studies. I merely wish to better understand PTSD and other related disorders and topics, and to be as accurate as possible in the portrayal of my character, as I feel a lot of characters written to have PTSD nowadays aren't as accurate as they should be. 

I will mention this subreddit in the acknowledgements of whatever media I decide on for my character's story.

If requested, I can post a spoilered comment including my character's backstory/source of trauma, if you believe it'll help in giving more accurate info.

If I've done anything wrong with this post, do tell me, and I'll fix it if I can.",10.046246105919003,10.70293392056075,10.60892523364486,50.76500778816202,57.92523364485982,14.516510903426793,46.1043613707165,13.493707505834458,7.2898875389408095,2050,121,269,79,24,698,197,428,0.115,0.81,0.075,-0.9628,1,3,0,0,0,1,82.0,0,6,2,9,8,13,0,1,13,0,31,3,0,12,0,74,51,49,1,11,11,0,1,1,0,6,3,0,0,7,17,22,0,0,18,0,2,1,5,6,0,0,5,3,29,7,56,33,8,20,0,1,1,0,40,12,0,17,3,192,46,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834695453176809,0.04744192017345082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03882494450003739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507631331866712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03394687530826284,0.049744606392636635,0.03995202658263978,0.0,0.04538714333275147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054698558159051856,0.0,0.1288140196862901,0.0530033799814552,0.0,0.061146280552364436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987361616049908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363106893752713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6677019402575267,0.0,0.0,0.049682900970727605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04055680114353482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024548039723943232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04437327989431535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04657301657881576,0.0,0.04072094050479766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04293208166933686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06508329038549891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02371878870624423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040769275725180805,0.0,0.0,0.04127497103040399,0.0,0.04593862427283783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03599877129384782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03692401294430492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04634590396853864,0.06731609393580594,0.12717441279903227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094643269797972,0.18598765248961696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5107649451910801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064762138025213,0.10969402530858176,0.0,0.0,0.05457156938303597,0.0,0.09898001614976623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122636699134147,0.0,0.0,0.05310517309732066,0.0,0.0,0.10092284949979104,0.0,0.039022175596717015,0.04243432299966346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162493955211132,0.0,0.041931101108789934,0.0,0.0,0.0572713981031415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582942387923027,0.0,0.0,0.17672273833011032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053081156867062204,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tempusername654683,2020/03/15,"I am gaining pleasure from suffering I have recently begun feeling positively towards overtly negative situations. Likely as a result of me trying to feel positively towards my negative life and forcing happiness. As an example I began laughing at the thought of me beating my future children earlier today, cut myself for that thought. Cant tell the doctors about this or im in deep shit, how should I proceed?",9.55,9.994762888888893,10.277222222222221,53.44,59.0,12.755555555555556,51.33333333333334,12.161744961471696,7.237933333333332,336,24,42,10,4,115,59,72,0.207,0.56,0.233,0.34,0,0,0,1,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,2,2,7,2,0,4,0,4,3,1,2,0,9,9,5,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,2,9,4,12,5,0,11,0,1,0,0,2,5,1,1,7,36,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833968924404157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27999619289585304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947423277428669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29907630878187824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955674834085484,0.1352688567505452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733841306805677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842118167869737,0.0,0.3112230516047804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420040260165863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4396212265450435,0.0,0.0,0.26244845765636604,0.0,0.0,0.18798233689575766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RagingRaptor48,2020/03/15,"I don't feel fulfilled I feel like nothing I do in life brings me fulfillment, I'm doing the same things over again every single day and I hate it. I feel all of my friends would rather have someone else around, I know they are my friends but, I feel like I'm the last person in our friend group they want to be with at any given time, like I'm the last choice if no one else is around. I really enjoy talking with my friends and other people but I'm too socially awkward to go out and meet and talk to new people. I don't feel depressed or anything like that, more like a rut that I can't get out of.",1.6306131078224093,3.1445428294573645,2.7960394644115603,95.90391120507401,78.06976744186046,5.621141649048626,21.029598308668078,6.1124844417494595,-0.04606046511627904,471,12,110,3,11,151,79,129,0.062,0.675,0.263,0.9823,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,2,0,5,13,1,1,4,0,10,1,0,0,1,25,26,8,0,4,5,0,5,5,4,1,1,0,0,1,5,10,0,0,6,0,0,2,4,3,0,1,1,5,17,10,15,23,4,16,0,1,0,0,13,8,0,2,11,68,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682073901519794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171635306459378,0.25349011364421903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182090913495773,0.0,0.1226284640172948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378741916309457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199581395950766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3599485746417277,0.2034272570271008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4399981808457781,0.0,0.07438571942911491,0.0,0.08091570955769369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405670803932636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782462689746848,0.2321113090332704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056456292655447,0.3477892443979436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375078790044099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13661386127343556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647783842804336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974115435295524,0.12431745842761242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912098778380391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513466709267878,0.1206349429763852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22887328916544955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458846064967624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830207421014217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0839772069248278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114001005140973,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,miraithrowaway,2020/03/15,"I desperately need advice... Situation down below So I have had this friend since 2013. We have been friends until last September. Me and my friend have been on and off a couple of times, but this time it was super nasty and it hurt me a lot.

For a long time now, I have been struggling with a very toxic and dangerous mentality. Basically I believe myself to be manipulative and a liar. It was because of these things that I got into an argument with my friend. I began to say nonsensical and confusing things, telling them to quit religion and to be your own man. Hell I even threatened to commit suicide if they didn't change... I feel very ashamed for this and since the parting, I yell at myself for being the way that I am now. I truly do hate myself.

But I want to change that. And this is a step I must take, but the thing is, I don't know how.

I don't know how to think in a more healthy mindset and I don't know how to make up to my friend for hurting them. Should I even make the attempt to try and apologise? They have blocked me on all platforms and I haven't tried to interact with them again since.

I'm at a loss and I don't know what to do. But I don't want to be this kind of person anymore and I truly do need advice on how to better myself and if I should even try to explain myself and apologise to them. Please help me",1.8447653429602864,3.668519440433212,3.3853516245487363,90.52598411552349,78.42238267148014,6.453660649819494,22.271335740072203,7.404127859558343,0.6801030758122737,1043,31,231,14,25,344,130,277,0.198,0.628,0.174,-0.9201,0,0,0,0,0,2,28.0,1,1,6,5,11,18,4,3,13,0,31,0,0,7,3,53,49,28,1,9,6,0,1,0,5,3,0,2,0,2,16,21,0,1,7,0,0,1,7,10,0,0,9,3,42,8,38,33,5,24,1,3,0,0,20,12,1,4,10,178,58,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21318374773629814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817821202809794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649425556243678,0.0,0.0,0.12289599136676725,0.0,0.0964725408011212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307847001131382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069512678895568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161392587963561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05515420843840906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42137532081915424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724137185739156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769407906817556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311413465487702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335451433409388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135902051553716,0.2397904218875209,0.08891489244036645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965325126360738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273605473596316,0.0,0.0,0.1456237130561081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992714943902712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617631189940542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812318788715408,0.0,0.0,0.09524459183474317,0.0,0.11973726397387435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602018141526245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674492461372244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27069671672877554,0.12261067467751295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11403427131303545,0.0,0.11931599504911207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201470817543131,0.0,0.0953408712869014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174040422190789,0.06989416466244996,0.0,0.0,0.19081656257970325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221748135499326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18000511828857402,0.1286766138584515,0.08658275696313268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aparkerm,2020/03/15,"An Odd Thing That I've Became Aware Of I dont know if this is due to a mental illness or something ( I am diagnosed with Depression and Anxiety) but Im very much easily influenced. Or get easily emersed into things. I wonder if anyone else expierance this and if anyone has any info on it. But ill read something, hear something, watch something and Ill easily attach to it and become it or do it in daily life. It can be the smallest thing to like a personality trait. Like Ill become that person mentally for a bit. Like Ill watch a movie and feel so mentally attached as if im in it, it doesnt even have to be a good movie? same thing with other forms of meida like comics or stories. And the more I think about it the more I'm like how much of my personality is mine? I dont know. I tried to do some googling but its really hard to explain or google. I dont know what this could be.",1.814320154291224,3.74910219672131,3.825721632915464,86.80718418514948,78.94535519125681,7.147412407585987,21.693667630986823,8.124751697461798,1.090214014786242,694,20,147,13,17,236,99,183,0.114,0.731,0.155,0.884,0,0,4,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,9,0,16,7,0,2,0,34,26,21,0,5,12,0,2,5,0,0,7,1,0,3,20,9,0,0,8,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,5,9,6,18,22,8,5,0,1,2,0,5,4,0,11,6,100,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508195104572138,0.0,0.08446263337430568,0.0,0.0,0.15440117233112302,0.11312713577358133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24387627824627076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205381044990713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08815265522455155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509516685999764,0.11206287801312502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3881958096053677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09223260735632123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292414687559381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582614124848845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576841800784116,0.0,0.0,0.09260588633376066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989048366874474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244390417969841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23852147538797436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18203380586917803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798518858031762,0.26970146362976954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337991104602557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16232673484751334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28921481356361073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043894437531017,0.0,0.07073087493834264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399931727739393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934035102076364,0.07074567144315623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496050844996284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910990425168603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197339224651939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OrdinaryIdea,2020/03/15,"Forgiving People That Hurt You The Most I’ve realized recently after a conversation with my husband that I haven’t forgiven a single person in my life that has done me wrong. Mostly significant people in my life who have wronged me. Yes, I have gotten over the situations themselves but I haven’t forgiven the people responsible for the pain those situations caused. I feel like I need to forgive these people for MYSELF. To fully let go. But where do I start? What mindset should I put myself in to handle the emotions left over to be able to let go?",4.410566239316243,6.6846620865384665,5.595512820512823,75.52726495726499,72.36538461538461,8.468376068376068,26.94017094017094,9.150863307647796,2.5234350427350423,443,16,76,10,9,147,65,104,0.09699999999999999,0.726,0.17800000000000002,0.7882,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,1,7,0,0,7,1,11,3,0,1,0,12,17,2,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,7,1,0,0,4,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,2,1,15,3,14,11,3,13,0,1,0,0,7,7,0,2,4,60,22,0,0.1630263001246023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16747291788912586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683250654991152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338264490007192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243099573523696,0.11646602138321092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18530320660674435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17452302607352535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17712855209389675,0.3334108744943426,0.2303005940769681,0.0796464154643848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208819358436444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17347147754136932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4520876383235613,0.14234827705126915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16388645979146102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16096880373365324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3664967837485344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11539085431995533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35648733377781844,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gooberbby,2020/03/15,"I found out I’m adopted and not an only child I found out I was adopted a few months ago. I’m 19 years old. I found out from my bipolar aunt who told me through text. My biological father is my adoptive mother’s first cousin. It was determined I would be adopted while my birth mother was pregnant, so my adoptive parents started the adoption process when I was a few days old. 


I also found out I have two sisters. I went and visited them about a month after I found out. They live across the world. My sisters are 21 and 16. They’ve always known about me. In fact my entire family- aunts uncles cousins even my two neighbors and best friends knew since we were 5 years old. 


When we used to visit India, we would meet sometimes but they kept my older sister away from me because we look alike and it would’ve confused me. 

A couple years ago I even found a video from my 7th birthday where me and her were dancing together and I didn’t question it at all even though we looked like twins. I remember thinking “yeah genes are crazy.. second cousins totally can look alike” I guess I never had a reason to think otherwise. 


I’m having trouble processing I think. Everyone told me I’m handling it well but to be honest I don’t think my body processed until after I came back from my trip. I’m processing everyday and it’s so hard because I don’t have someone with me all the time to talk to. I’m an only child. 


My adoptive parents love me a lot I know that. I think I’m having a hard time to process because it doesn’t feel like I’m adopted. I’ve been given so much love by everyone in my life. 


I’ve been FaceTiming my older sister.  Trying to continue to form a relationship and bond with her. It’s easy to talk to her. I have trouble when my birth mom takes the phone away and talks to me. At this point of my processing, I don’t want to talk to her. It makes me uncomfortable. She expects me to talk to her like I’ve known her my entire life. 


They’ve known about me forever but I really just found out and I need time. I can’t just form a bond with you magically. 

It upsets me when she does that. I also gained 15 lbs and with my face chubbier I see the resemblance I have with my birth mom and it unsettling. I think that’s because I convinced myself I look like my adoptive parents for 20 years and to finally see my self look like someone else is really weird. 


I don’t know. There’s so much going on in my head and everyone thinks I’m fine but I don’t think I am. I can barely focus. I’m pretty much failing all my classes whereas I usually get A/B grades. 


I saw a post on Instagram with a friend and her sister and the captions read: “the greatest part about having a sister is being able to call her my best friend” 


That brought me to tears because I don’t feel that way with my sisters and I want to be able to. It’s so hard with them being across the world and me trying to process and deal with what I’m feeling. 

It’s hard because although we’re sisters I’m afraid our relationship will always be that of cousins. 

Things at home are a little difficult too. My mom is bipolar and has depression. She takes her medication but sometimes she’s difficult. My parents don’t really consider my mental health and they prioritize my moms. I feel my mental health is falling apart and no one is taking me seriously to the point where I can see a therapist or a professional and get help. With my moms condition it makes living at home a little difficult and makes it feel suffocating. 

Earlier today I told my mom “I hate you when you act like this” and in hindsight I should’ve chose different wording but her response was “I know your older sister is teaching you this” and that BROKE me. Because first of all, my older sister is so sweet and respectful. My moms known her forever it’s her cousins daughter.  And it makes me feel torn apart and helpless. It makes me feel like I can’t try and form a bond with my sister because my mom feels whatever she’s feeling.  


I’m sorry it’s not an organized post but I need to let things out :(",2.2690736456525933,4.31251993650794,3.6257057708373495,88.2618746385194,77.96214896214897,6.654848660111817,24.939929953087848,7.669130373188453,1.2826852258852264,3184,116,655,48,76,1042,295,819,0.092,0.78,0.128,0.9875,5,0,0,0,0,0,62.0,6,5,5,6,29,35,1,3,30,1,54,12,3,7,7,128,133,56,0,7,12,34,13,7,4,3,7,0,3,3,32,55,0,1,35,3,0,10,15,15,1,6,28,23,138,20,72,95,18,85,0,4,9,2,95,31,0,6,48,420,170,7,0.08901894728469616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890992567195224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118841998191171,0.07407089530005187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363623129852517,0.034225037825121124,0.0,0.21706049608301706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341989314268337,0.0,0.0,0.049439991274075314,0.0,0.0,0.045449149046323634,0.05090698038777265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049248886001539316,0.0,0.028704928322431544,0.04588731292083173,0.03833594442778378,0.0,0.0,0.046502926597696295,0.0,0.0,0.03895054032846867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03718195389726898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819426268578218,0.0,0.0,0.12759212843055745,0.0,0.0,0.0419595705082941,0.0,0.20254794510255333,0.06359515372701365,0.0,0.04875795276930852,0.0,0.07571947108501226,0.0,0.3416163833551038,0.10316372677666487,0.0,0.04650872583469831,0.0,0.025295759592169016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04903220325947511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594869833278132,0.043943890397028604,0.04567956094050584,0.09462297824999012,0.0,0.0,0.029833761963028376,0.0,0.08929326228786197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338372807161361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04551395240840244,0.06287671507021464,0.15221556392907384,0.08922037129582694,0.07860536135510449,0.0,0.18688373931093025,0.0,0.0,0.037840362816884486,0.0803430754561849,0.0,0.14855209638997213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04483861206054617,0.08971016138312249,0.0,0.0,0.4170316606931277,0.07105407443234821,0.0,0.09815875335840417,0.06600642145661684,0.034328449994991274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011561586483762,0.0,0.030160771254286844,0.06770292075740614,0.0,0.0,0.1976900125549982,0.048199422538120165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415167865060906,0.0,0.08525554438891694,0.045282136138884786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04986079695100568,0.0,0.044521518538035834,0.0,0.08554172563649348,0.04576315194670083,0.0,0.0955730349727442,0.050420557033444426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640486349591784,0.0,0.0464330881644759,0.0,0.0,0.03681869654515981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754254651569204,0.0,0.08804201507315268,0.049824711698329714,0.031504034533057564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039675472011522,0.17887514462411674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0516789294661474,0.05914023306145614,0.2281589879699301,0.043730331866665896,0.0,0.07786149604967584,0.0,0.042189776656795984,0.12759212843055745,0.0,0.09065703277371367,0.0,0.0869585765382054,0.0,0.0,0.038441894437655486,0.04902089696597493,0.0,0.05250568150990882,0.03532954843183027,0.0,0.0,0.04001936217736548,0.041260727987791374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09485475910901496,0.0,0.0,0.1146505669010258
mentalhealth,vex-hex,2020/03/15,"Anyone want someone to talk with about the virus, or conversely, something other than the virus? Hi, just your local (or not so local) nocturnal introvert checking in to see if anyone wants to chat. Im someone who is comfortably introverted though I do enjoy talking to people online where theres not a lot of pressure. 

I have a lot of free time to talk so I can message fairly often and I'm open to talking about pretty much anything. Im not overly functional aside from the basics in life due to my mental health conditions so im understanding and not judgemental about issues relating to that too. 

I'm trans F>M and have gone through full transition. It doesnt have to be an issue but if its something you had questions about then I dont mind answering them as im quite open. 


My interests include:
* Gaming - anything from The Sims, to Fifa and CoD, to collecting older games. 

* Animals - they're all awesome, say no more. 

* Sport - anything from F1 to football (British) to cricket. 

* Politics - I'm quite a free thinker and tend to hold opinions on a case-by-case basis so I dont really hold a specific set position but I'm willing to talk to people from anywhere on the political spectrum. 

* Psychology - anything from serial killers to theories to social experiments. 

* Documentaries - anything from mental health to conspiracy to natural disasters. 

If you feel you have anything remotely in common or just simply want a chat then feel free to send me a message maybe with a few facts about yourself or your interests and I'll get back to you when I can depending on how many messages come through. Sorry if this type of post isnt allowed and thanks for reading!",4.549795037756201,6.902967582524275,5.4086084142394855,76.66937432578213,72.20388349514563,8.590722761596549,31.832793959007553,9.250403328903447,3.2642392664509163,1329,63,223,31,27,433,176,309,0.07200000000000001,0.815,0.114,0.8544,1,0,2,0,0,0,42.0,0,6,1,2,19,9,0,1,14,0,15,3,0,3,2,49,31,27,0,7,16,0,2,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,6,12,0,2,6,6,4,3,9,1,0,0,2,4,16,11,50,27,7,26,0,0,1,0,26,13,0,14,8,146,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962162734939212,0.0,0.4576544958428708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127268022126024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984399424168112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21726334418994875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066834074661677,0.0,0.0,0.0937334240150386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0484265577857398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19704969516336654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4004832519180957,0.19348799109961165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546949676814334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576029859943467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397283699857703,0.09311929114746208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868188919915185,0.0,0.09359020343916094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813761584699661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285187747550929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08877113859404814,0.09429877697296266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038337095440051,0.19717387243518544,0.09271481217757008,0.0,0.05937941386670575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737105928104327,0.0,0.0,0.07386171344968713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448550604360736,0.15707141321910192,0.14271416362088615,0.0,0.10375856301859236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3725024658108243,0.0,0.08533624922426422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910671881512065,0.0,0.05404812638292361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649327678922892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16401241105312747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DataLender,2020/03/15,"I've been out of work for 6 years. I'm have feelings of grandeur I believe that I'm the reincarnation of King Tut. I suppress these feelings.. but it's difficult. I believe that everyone else is living in my reality and that no one else matters but me. 

I need help. I know it's not normal. Who can I talk to or see.",-0.4846434494195684,1.72573294029851,2.28348258706468,91.95053067993368,92.73134328358208,5.365837479270317,23.862354892205637,6.937597516519254,0.970009618573798,245,11,55,4,9,85,48,67,0.096,0.794,0.11,-0.0387,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,13,11,4,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,3,8,0,7,10,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,1,1,34,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5717850501229711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4239558290961247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24247168731535915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566100935085209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17008516178356534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13945590990513032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22406838299016574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881544956703018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486238800763189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719494733738151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022081386036092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20395689923486446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847350701642377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634084920643294
mentalhealth,Likillith,2020/03/15,"Help please What do you think about all of this?
I am not okay, and have just come to terms with this fact. Everything is getting worse mentally, and has been but didn’t notice until a few days ago. I opened up to an online group of people in a game called VR Chat (Virtual chat game). By opened up I mean I got scared when they came to close and started to breathe really heavy and beg them to stop. I thought this was normal until they asked why I reacted as such. I just stated that it is normal for me, no worries. They then told me how it wasn’t normal to have panic attacks. I didn’t  know that not being able to breathe and freaking out + hiding was a panic attack and told them that if that was a panic attack then I have them every day, which I said jokingly. They then proceeded to converse (two guys) about how I may have been abused sexually or physically. I respoded by freaking out for an unknown reason and they helped calm me. When I got off the game I started to realize that no one around me reacts to things like I do (sometimes have panic attacks for no reason to).
My online friends (I don’t trust anyone irl) told me to get in therapy. This is almost impossible by the lack of a phone, car, family member assistance, or place in my town to go to. 
At the beginning when I stated that my mental state is getting worse I kinda meant I can’t control myself anymore. I do not believe in online tests and are nothing like the real thing. Yet a month ago (before opening up) my symptoms for all and anything mental related was high, today every single test I took came out 1/3 times stronger than a month agos.
This tells me that I am spiraling down really fast from purely opening up to someone. This means that there is something wrong and I am not self diagnosing that came out positive. I am solely stating that maybe it isn’t normal to score so high on the tests.
Even a little answer is nice so please I need some sort of help/answer/guidance/anything
I will accept whatever anyone syas",4.683863636363637,5.6270449116161645,5.416363636363638,82.35287878787881,69.58080808080808,8.088888888888889,27.040404040404038,8.285830014693849,1.7385797979797983,1579,49,305,22,27,513,205,396,0.18600000000000005,0.7240000000000001,0.09,-0.9924,0,0,1,0,1,0,43.0,0,1,8,1,16,21,4,5,15,1,35,4,2,7,4,68,61,27,0,7,10,0,0,2,1,2,2,1,0,2,23,25,0,2,11,6,0,7,13,12,0,2,21,1,46,9,52,37,7,63,0,0,0,0,29,27,0,8,27,216,69,3,0.0735095475846796,0.08709679351767027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954853358645524,0.0,0.07360919347390787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290171859933157,0.1027991697066438,0.0,0.1209841884856324,0.06543908227948206,0.0687215039321692,0.3345108902416918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06255121076055299,0.08282008744310614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506146694408927,0.2522260178098509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332196626402994,0.0,0.0,0.08244720825992073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481515379795366,0.0,0.0,0.07461064343462925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0485523628946261,0.0,0.1238699285617656,0.0,0.06606564144611937,0.0,0.0692982592806381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056793294115606525,0.0,0.1152171138549173,0.0,0.04177716992056228,0.0,0.1175846008568761,0.0,0.0,0.0727860092634406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781570069375086,0.15533374595487062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040398924911789404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182610367840657,0.07367587833091457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385022090355063,0.16014689476406346,0.0,0.0,0.222241003005738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734923912019825,0.0,0.0,0.05450639809794459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880949963128507,0.07053439347096191,0.08369110714315862,0.0,0.0,0.049811971885423384,0.0,0.0,0.34499046229519004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096226457999596,0.0,0.07680183151633159,0.1613828174902726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366995843941462,0.09418419700457722,0.1511601158298245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992441327004674,0.0,0.07359588097652428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668648996744458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062284401121000726,0.056591241082246786,0.07270282219551284,0.0,0.1040608722640025,0.0,0.0,0.0614572733204441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640456624355214,0.0,0.0,0.0642505846534741,0.0,0.0840645740836778,0.0,0.097672954107098,0.04710194990682416,0.0,0.05835836968609054,0.04286400834474905,0.0,0.06967845586448364,0.21072456869884965,0.08167181213360702,0.0,0.0,0.07180814663520689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06633093301646019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465251381059569,0.14982501817026547,0.0,0.0803711505617414,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SpecificConcept99,2020/03/15,"With this whole Coronavirus and social isolation days on end, how do you prevent getting gradually too much “in your own head”? I’m 25, female. I have always enjoyed spending time alone, in fact I pride myself in being my own best friend not for any social problem but because I genuinely enjoy my solitude and being alone with my thoughts. 
I noticed a few months ago that if I isolate myself for too long I tend to get sucked into my own thoughts where my mind becomes a toxic unbearable place, that I just want to run away from myself. It starts off positive while I recharge my introvert batteries reading a book, painting or watching a show, really enjoying my solitude. But then it tapers off to a compulsive recollection of memories and racing thoughts and gradually I slide into plain depression: no energy, sadness, obsessive thoughts about past hurts and trauma, the sort of things that leak into my consciousness and I usually avoid thinking about because I obsess and can’t snap out of it so easily. 

Now, four days into working from home and this social isolation from the whole virus chaos, even though I’m with my roommates and digitally in touch with my close friends, this cycle is starting to happen again. 

What advice can you give, if any? I don’t know if anyone else is going through something similar but I’d really appreciate some insight.",9.76609756097561,8.904519715447158,9.097682926829274,66.3494512195122,59.162601626016254,12.265040650406506,40.82520325203252,11.374738998889045,4.842315447154472,1094,50,174,25,12,348,156,246,0.185,0.675,0.14,-0.917,0,5,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,3,0,3,12,16,1,3,7,0,9,1,1,1,1,46,27,21,0,5,9,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,11,19,0,2,9,3,1,3,4,9,0,1,4,2,28,7,32,21,9,34,0,3,1,0,9,16,1,6,15,127,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174333357856624,0.10652762950922297,0.0,0.0,0.24892951357730825,0.0,0.0,0.09999498573529902,0.0,0.0,0.16344584756549238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402895144999087,0.1231331920098207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290809597712985,0.0,0.0,0.14651477561864315,0.13272352557409692,0.0,0.0,0.12611594397981096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550054923195893,0.0,0.10350630164997536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039054974310142,0.0,0.10643912333759148,0.0,0.0,0.0793742625761928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18569336571662698,0.0,0.1255726519186365,0.115282532293285,0.06829805713393944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627009919118116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333392288934315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054503260104135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286495125932031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604487778903109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063508366936884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134219916536025,0.0,0.0959223070075752,0.0,0.08834223934702448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136819703874981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11472035876982048,0.0,0.0,0.12555699409193025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499096754390507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020723100728135,0.0,0.15397399298143374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675089487342407,0.0,0.09251636298162658,0.0,0.0,0.1701205565817025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983873743400567,0.07700310174129027,0.11807104243828645,0.38162118445485416,0.07007483983443381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235546493632822,0.0,0.07088215759155013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683415441110496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748862017138738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Evanawesome123,2020/03/15,Possible Bipolar II Disorder? Hi for years now I have struggled with depression and finding my place in this world. I don't have many friends and I have immense trouble finding new ones. I have been doing some research and I share some of the symptoms of bipolar II like having unbearable depressive episodes that last as long as two weeks and followed by self destructive ones that cause people that might have been my friend to distance themselves from me and I really am trying to look for an answer. I think its bipolar because several people in my family have suffered from bipolar and my grandfather struggled with it his whole life. If someone could help me figure this out that would be greatly appreciated as I desperately want to get the help I need to be happy again.,7.421705790297338,8.493423549295777,6.850657276995308,74.04872456964006,63.50704225352112,9.691392801251958,37.60876369327072,9.725611199111238,3.857833176838811,632,31,103,12,9,196,93,142,0.17600000000000002,0.691,0.133,-0.8033,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,13,1,2,3,0,17,6,0,1,0,23,23,10,0,5,1,0,0,1,2,2,6,0,0,1,8,9,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,7,0,3,2,1,16,6,19,16,3,13,0,3,1,0,8,5,0,4,8,78,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919437745990985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15494262092688887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042444262404013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598170738291239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17286275554416455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218787343466027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757093956781513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23305975646356636,0.0,0.07880176968546683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662891724505271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16055995408775678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20219459440083395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294552002862592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653477020961943,0.07368728338305831,0.0,0.0,0.13347865177559318,0.12665811947186645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15291662667034334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16000541373356714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183756871502168,0.0,0.14567129678121174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20441085901718534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20913125672317498,0.0,0.15758388756880912,0.0,0.0,0.17003669500990531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662472638020224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734722694089226,0.17039349750212754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277966666908883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153578079638237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567687689076434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664493973441626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240278555316024,0.0,0.1473377220630571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896267414910462,0.0,0.12098568400414518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683948553526023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071443798517258,0.0,0.0,0.09712873665206323
mentalhealth,tempxerr,2020/03/15,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I have mood swings. Not just normal mood swings, but awful mood swings - one day i will want to kill myself and not talk to anyone and want to shut everyone out and then the next day i’m too hyper, too overactive first people to handle and too social and just wanna speak and laugh with everyone. One day everything is grey and black, the next it’s a blinding dazzling white where everything is ok and it’s all going to be ok. Sometimes they last ages, I’ll be in my ‘grey phase’ (i like to call it that) for days on end, maybe even weeks, and then something will tick and i’m happy as ever and never want life to end - and vice versa. i’m super clingy too. i’m 16, my family are together and i never really had any trauma as a child, and I have a girlfriend who i love and i’m quite popular in school and do quite well. but there’s days where i want nothing more than to kill myself, or to just stop existing. i have no reason to feel this way, but i do. there’s also this bubbling anger in me that lingers - not just anger, but a hatred toward everything, sometimes i imagine snapping and hurting everyone and everything.

i don’t know why one minute i’m fine and the next i want to die. it doesn’t feel normal. i need answers before i enter the grey phase again, i’m worried for my safety. please help me.",2.692944664031621,4.124572760869569,3.8817127799736495,89.5774505928854,75.01449275362319,6.9022397891963125,21.603425559947294,7.520522993642371,0.6549188405797093,1046,25,224,13,22,341,138,276,0.174,0.643,0.183,-0.7199,0,0,1,0,0,3,32.0,0,0,1,4,17,20,4,0,8,3,16,3,0,1,4,55,35,29,3,9,12,0,2,1,1,2,2,1,0,1,10,22,0,1,7,0,0,2,9,7,1,4,1,9,24,10,25,30,2,33,0,1,6,1,10,9,0,1,22,138,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738340249871213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06580391529744302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766074618729633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234038479212208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988084802210601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120289820501438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042739879134054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17141117160861316,0.0,0.0,0.06391275555982412,0.08753001058798167,0.0,0.277390986694689,0.3478666693781993,0.0,0.09122198060137983,0.0,0.09785517341875116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230875624785497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05499411130430619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300876342933947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06485993116920971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103589558937535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21411356318230995,0.0,0.10635966856528288,0.07887686602354076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834839361951797,0.04727477648385145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733471746654993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721403522402124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175045436287042,0.14926316745303808,0.0,0.3087338888349448,0.0,0.18961945392146554,0.09284918755146733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19671259192731894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708507196540321,0.0,0.0,0.1062195529823856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058442192157216,0.0,0.0,0.061990510882201824,0.09949113655285748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793193699289614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986403268269838,0.0,0.07449487403870601,0.19140727356877904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090036103140089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777651093804573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853742425230711,0.07680801644685271,0.07761951460890537,0.0,0.08700388102165173,0.0,0.08731588856214685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827014758186137,0.0,0.0,0.10579797549838603,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cloakedeyes,2020/03/15,"Life is too hard - how does one survive this life? I'm not made for this life, but I've also realized that it seems a lot of us aren't. Everything feels like too much almost all the time. It feels like life is moving so slow and so fast at the same time. How does one survive when they're constantly being tormented and tormenting themselves in their own brain? I feel trapped.",3.5343999999999984,5.194821573333332,3.7596666666666683,90.3715,73.26666666666667,7.666666666666668,24.5,8.344100000000001,1.3146,298,9,63,5,6,92,56,75,0.15,0.85,0.0,-0.8883,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,1,2,8,2,0,0,3,0,4,5,1,3,1,16,10,9,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,4,3,2,4,8,5,9,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,3,8,38,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805202260480896,0.0,0.0,0.1441665345614252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124747282085928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948141529893884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31552122774334224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620203124775842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27345866397364915,0.2575782108959361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614917545569128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5093366656308564,0.17614735144157684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326408354739132,0.0,0.1705813710545813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19160470181768255,0.13252349480572329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24431916722046726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16411636593967993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21024059932035824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21684965445267265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Makerfire,2020/03/15,"Am I weird ? Wtf is wrong with me Idk if I need help idk if I’m ok I hate everything I hate everyone . Every single thing pisses me off irritates me or makes me so unbelievably sad idk what to do. I’m almost 18 have nothing left of my family life’s always been shit. Sometimes I can pull off looking happy when I go outside where other people are but I’m severely antisocial and have a very short social battery. Whenever I’m outside I can basically only think about going home where I feel comfortable. I hate school I hate anything where I gotta be out with people for a long time. I always feel unlucky, I feel like everything goes bad no matter what happens even if I have no control over things they still make me so fucking annoyed I can’t stand it. I feel like I can never get some peace. I don’t know of any mental illnesses in my family
Because I barely know them but I was told schizophrenia ran through and I’ve never really heard voices or seen things but sometimes I feel mentally ill with myself I feel like my thoughts jsut don’t match a normal person. Everything I do is so fucking sad and I can’t cry so it feels even worse. I never get anything I want no matter what nothing works out I have trouble learning -I can’t get help anywhere(for my mental whatever) or my mom would disown me cause she’s one of those people who think it’s all in your head and not real. I’m stuck pretending everything is fine

I seriously feel like there’s no point to life but I don’t have the balls to end it. I feel trapped life is shit what the fuck is wrong with me??",1.2338868243243226,3.672836581250003,3.049222972972977,88.60537162162163,84.75,6.08445945945946,21.46114864864865,7.432916251226849,0.9377728040540544,1246,41,251,21,37,414,167,320,0.295,0.609,0.096,-0.9973,0,1,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,1,2,2,13,27,11,0,5,1,27,12,4,4,4,53,70,19,0,7,11,1,9,4,0,2,5,2,1,1,14,10,0,1,15,2,0,4,14,19,0,1,8,13,48,8,20,59,3,26,0,2,2,3,12,13,6,8,12,152,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793572993401353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295219676704681,0.0,0.0,0.052927223371703636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12809529075256496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498498869641113,0.04744458407434123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995308260203447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729321778313216,0.0,0.0,0.08549284989430889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893448001632071,0.0,0.0,0.10281226199157023,0.0,0.06557532316093989,0.07437011737941153,0.279795158548354,0.0,0.14674282288142373,0.0,0.3541797124365836,0.2224077192981612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21585837257158186,0.12198924407935922,0.0,0.08846542337107555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882501282721168,0.08285172404444265,0.0,0.30736494426115285,0.07987626707319186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433592133079284,0.0,0.07807006371658498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554691480666096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845627695226396,0.0,0.1649213734401265,0.1520956705082498,0.0,0.0,0.06887730185006936,0.06535778875930381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390456196356387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23530368929608034,0.0,0.0,0.09115382137452556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057710127245763375,0.1800824077696315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625709768147981,0.1493604040794415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273977617645171,0.059193394909126215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187303929122032,0.06795835229235234,0.0,0.0,0.07357472160588409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858783769768921,0.049860036466793815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876834502958564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792600318194907,0.15978321943054485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933811518404417,0.0,0.0,0.153952169522916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062155319936448065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15512083370088225,0.09974093381704847,0.0,0.06178850663343659,0.04538343134312176,0.0,0.0,0.07437011737941153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421808843648792,0.04590628448254725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056661332316046926,0.0,0.0793156506844183,0.055288360306432326,0.1701902707814923,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trashaccout12344,2020/03/15,"Hard time loving myself I’m extremely frustrated with myself because I can’t seem to love myself. I’ll love myself or think I do for a few months but then something happens like I gain weight or my crush rejects me and then uses me. Then I lose my confidence all over again and spend a lot of time consciously and unconsciously picking out flaws and trashing myself. And then when I try to change and get apps that spread positive and promote self love, it’ll work for a second, but then I get so stuck in my ways that it seems almost impossible to actually love myself. 

I feel like I’m on a infinite journey of improving myself and getting to a certain point of achievement and if I don’t get there then I’m not good enough. For example my weight. If I’m not skinny, fit, or if I gain weight back that I’ve worked so hard to lose, then I’m not good enough or pretty.

If my grades are lacking and are a C or lower then I’m failing and I’m not good enough. 

I feel like I need to be a certain way in order to love myself. I feel like I’m in a constant state of trying to fix myself. Anything that’s negative about me has to be fixed or I’m not good enough. And I feel like if I’m not in this state of mind then I’ll become lazy and let myself go causing me to not achieve my goals making me worthless. 

I’ve also found myself in situations where I avoid relationship or go for guys who don’t like or care about me because I feel like I’m not in the headspace that I should be in order to be in a healthy relationship. I feel like I need to be super confident and love myself and I’m not that and I’ve never really been like that ever in my life. So It feels like the possibility of being in a healthy relationship is impossible for me because I can’t seem to love myself. It’s like when I try to love myself, I get angry that I’m giving myself love and mad that I’m being compassionate and just irritated. And I don’t know why. It just irritates me and I prefer to help others instead. 

It also feels condescending when people tell me I need to work on myself because that’s all I do. Is work on myself, try to fix myself. I’m literally trying to improve all the time. And I make improvements but not on things that I want specific improvements on. I want improvements on my self worth! I mean it’s cool that I’m more social and a little bit more open and it’s great that I’m doing things that are out of my comfort zone, but I’m still self loathing 😡 and it’s making me upset! Why can’t I just love myself? Why is it so hard to do? Why does it make me feel irritated whenever I do give myself love. Like I actually hate doing it. But for some reason helping others makes me happy. It just doesn’t make sense!!!!!",2.2072124413145566,3.820766681338029,4.128169014084509,86.54212441314556,76.72887323943662,6.986854460093897,22.572769953051644,7.793537801064563,0.9556107981220664,2137,61,457,32,48,727,196,568,0.136,0.573,0.29100000000000004,0.9989,1,1,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,0,14,22,47,3,2,14,1,31,17,1,10,7,107,102,60,0,13,32,0,15,12,0,2,1,0,0,4,33,28,4,1,19,0,2,3,19,10,0,2,3,16,73,37,54,89,14,56,0,5,0,12,27,24,0,19,35,302,106,10,0.0,0.0,0.09732556268913337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04993437429556495,0.0,0.0,0.07975688769375869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04103610885118709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03834447370550456,0.0,0.12159329855363815,0.05507393777207919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054441605506563816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050842502975796434,0.0512269167956019,0.05275243835935407,0.0,0.0,0.053888270840377235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04363875292327383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20610284501456666,0.0,0.0,0.045107355058569235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269272687081786,0.24937385002175014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054676347498499735,0.0,0.0,0.13026666500395598,0.09567351352769077,0.05668087752006784,0.16730354778084738,0.0,0.05497829809624928,0.0,0.04937594964044028,0.04409702654123921,0.05308411177993573,0.13401251307226136,0.04923311870263723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684929944988746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027405476713975717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050992158438948255,0.03522237959264864,0.29234866266053644,0.04997961139778642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157633690004333,0.0,0.04239495086762976,0.5400805620710483,0.0,0.19971876670039146,0.0,0.0,0.05431953950328107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035122972399809,0.0,0.039803185940386863,0.0,0.0,0.11092675068192152,0.03846033289749951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034571344615929936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04714022298207539,0.05621729886434325,0.0,0.050732440015949086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03194593449540282,0.051271352436995286,0.0,0.16061477032661342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361905237589848,0.15606577301263974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056052347100596235,0.0,0.050832899657948814,0.0,0.03838988149018555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03982367282368448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04358576138906755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625854215704992,0.03195261740684633,0.0,0.0,0.08723315670835131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16928134246692764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043068884773372666,0.0,0.0,0.05882543459363353,0.07916385353867006,0.0,0.18217290194796407,0.0,0.0,0.17998804118358055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452144313449261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pimentopimento,2020/03/15,"Who do I contact about a friend in a foreign country that said he will be attempting suicide soon? The title is pretty self-explanatory. I have a friend that just went to Germany that is definitely going to try to kill himself, and I’m not sure what action to take next. I don’t know his phone number, and he’s planning on deleting his social media soon. I just want to make sure he’s safe.",4.892658227848102,5.324987886075952,5.807443037974688,81.56762025316458,68.87341772151899,7.838987341772152,29.7240506329114,7.554174236665415,1.7825827848101268,309,11,61,3,5,102,56,79,0.151,0.644,0.205,0.3971,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,2,5,6,1,0,4,0,7,0,0,1,2,11,15,2,2,1,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,2,1,7,5,8,11,0,8,0,0,0,0,13,2,0,0,3,38,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3762763101351893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839450229459646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26941193619050385,0.0,0.1338288140875728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625473500394401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589796851179216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477410757697577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231637384512894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25403799807273336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482316490552656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26636456941706343,0.0,0.4590177425549322,0.0,0.18309206925712554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16532988311747324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363074636533085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22573972896037786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,laxluna,2020/03/15,"I could really use some advice Around 6 years ago I was at a party drinking with friends, we were underage and unsupervised. I fell and hit my head pretty hard on the tiled floor and didn't know where I was when I got up, I was very scared and distraught but my friends calmed me down and the party continued,

My mental health began to go to shit around this time and I dropped out of school shortly after due to panic attacks and not being able to get out of bed, I still to this day struggle pretty bad with mental health issues and find it extremely hard to concentrate aswell as it feels like I'm constantly daydreaming.

It's been 6 years since this incident and I am only now beginning to realise that all these problems could be connected to that night.

I'd like your opinion on whether a bad bang to the head could be connected with these problems

And also I'd like to know if there is anything I can do to hopefully move forward.",9.227094594594591,6.756979837837839,8.545506756756762,74.98366554054058,61.43243243243244,12.060810810810812,37.71959459459461,10.411451182825502,3.6458243243243253,750,27,147,13,8,237,116,185,0.184,0.657,0.159,-0.7490000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,1,1,0,0,8,17,2,4,5,0,16,6,3,1,1,36,28,16,0,7,4,0,3,3,2,0,2,0,1,0,10,18,1,0,4,1,0,4,2,10,0,0,8,3,16,7,27,13,2,32,0,0,0,0,4,13,1,4,19,96,26,1,0.1218504944539996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907089293582185,0.10801311129533828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744379639149238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002725746006538,0.2169455477381471,0.0,0.13862252834995253,0.0,0.0,0.20348014634107225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167709632356264,0.0,0.291863114269635,0.0,0.0,0.0785834884829337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936709559719128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061611271193649425,0.08705001758481734,0.0,0.0,0.1113691444231222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882827795038794,0.0,0.0636618541585221,0.0,0.06925044404395461,0.0,0.09745497166937153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183082183090676,0.0,0.2501075223566093,0.2590427552371993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102503489863245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271802584576446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339316901723793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17858999005202955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455932777349488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12950779186288774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11434843466621032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267279182583796,0.0,0.14296530108608624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24793151780643505,0.0,0.2331889338474973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806054690746378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199360193907895,0.1233192056748739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12507778151837426,0.10079598818061453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730996227166447,0.0,0.0,0.12738459338208724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105200321184649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052397043069069,0.0,0.10053941914067094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15693544680597532
mentalhealth,trashemup,2020/03/15,"Going down hill or just a burn out? I feel like I’m slipping into bad habits, such as, eating/binging almost every day, smoking much more than I used to, not working out as consistently as I used to, I’ve been having very big mood swings. ( I have been told by my therapist that I hold high expectations for myself, and by my teacher that I have imposter syndrome(?) shes a librarian )    does this seem like a burn out?",2.9799477351916366,4.834329085365859,4.376132404181185,84.55231707317077,75.21951219512195,6.636933797909408,25.12891986062717,7.447530270364453,1.2152139372822297,323,11,64,4,7,107,60,82,0.047,0.88,0.07400000000000001,0.2593,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,2,0,15,13,5,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,1,10,2,14,10,2,9,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,3,3,42,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622787111517029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21869531592163985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16891909258992693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22921116033690705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22068198060850594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13243647265167371,0.18711831536414855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885725226991886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767367278779573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25592534044675685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925440277573392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384454633138657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30411355755306724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25027928205699695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4524358920466007,0.0,0.21611445074048527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19068354430726006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AccomplishedBid0,2020/03/15,"There's more to it, right? According to my psychiatrist, I have childhood trauma.

I was diagnosed with depressive disorder. I agree that I am depressed but that only covers half of the issue. 

1. I get overtly angry at people who do not deserve it. I'm irritable at times. 

2. I have very few friends. My social life was never good because of some abandonment and relocation thangs. I know how to talk and ""make friends"" but never stick through with the relationship because I'm use to being left and i don't like people who i truly let in leaving. 

3. I get really hyper from nowhere and it can range from a day to 2 days, I think. I'm absolutely high on life and feel unstoppable. When like this, i get quite scared, I sweat and peers look at me odd. This might happen 2-3 times a month.  I don't do anything crazy like spending all my savings. Then I have a sudden mood shift.  

4. I have these realizations that I'm hollow.  In the sense you think (empty) and then ""hollow"" as in I don't recognize my hands. I do not feel attached to myself almost like a dream. I'll eventually wake up from a coma. 

5. I go elsewhere. Dissociate. I zone out and go away quite often.  When walking,  driving,  talking,  etc. This happens quite often in a given day.  

6. I do self harm and have ideation but have never made any plans.  I also consume alcohol to numb these emotions.  Honestly,  i don't why i consume. I just know it makes me feel better. 

7. I have a significant other who is unaware of my ideations, except for the depression. I try to act normal and not express how i really feel because i don't want to scare them.  
Maybe I'm over thinking it and might be wanting more explanation. I don't want to pay again for another appointment.... tooo costly.",1.1817438450521751,3.7462511612903238,3.213054627293189,86.15120984791655,87.24046920821115,5.987342290117984,23.179499420309625,7.397020576406223,1.2782076109936569,1350,52,262,24,43,454,187,341,0.179,0.7240000000000001,0.09699999999999999,-0.978,0,0,1,0,0,0,60.0,0,1,1,5,10,20,0,2,11,0,27,9,3,6,4,53,57,22,0,4,8,0,5,4,2,2,6,1,0,1,17,14,1,1,9,1,3,5,12,9,0,1,4,7,40,10,35,48,6,36,0,4,1,0,13,15,0,6,20,169,57,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049968733543492,0.09838084323891623,0.0,0.0,0.07856862107632769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681178029655142,0.10302124164480292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084945589039473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230691405730873,0.0,0.0,0.1796725914662761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689207443289453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19008484556572453,0.0,0.2538617060568296,0.09971931044589998,0.0,0.0,0.11260033425154435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11051539776378108,0.0,0.0,0.10957211549887272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19870788289062755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15181180235019676,0.0,0.15399104760764612,0.0,0.1116728226720021,0.08240547888973931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376016888795984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038040507529586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254503524270032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798869302042624,0.0,0.0,0.1040300898981551,0.10674637395837858,0.10046489250275263,0.13879046064321018,0.1919953829938986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250329310850582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296431481716373,0.131162156702716,0.0,0.098702983458811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084504902370741,0.0,0.0,0.07842034773946156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22732396480883685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626185036322064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472177536881522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622511879638938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31349545131299417,0.0,0.0,0.12587993814081105,0.0,0.0,0.10548122253304862,0.0,0.08390296788900724,0.0,0.0,0.19672610139242652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024937401427196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015112040910053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793550087518754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18885940728340406,0.0,0.0,0.1145780054512116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670371443100777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848544366709018,0.0,0.08106461178874111,0.17384705248218335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865323494267836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,THEVYVYD,2020/03/15,"What is my brain/body telling me? I'm always tired no matter what. The time I go to sleep, how long I sleep, and when I wake up, it all just feels the same to me :(

Think of it this way - you know those tall ""high striker"" machines at amusement parks, where you hit it with a hammer and try to get it to go all the way up to 100? I can only get it up to maybe 60-70, and it just plateaus from there. That's my ceiling where I stop, and I can't get passed it, no matter how hard I try. I can only get that much energy, and then it just stays the same or goes down until I sleep.

I sleep because it feels good, yet I'm also forcing myself to sleep simultaneously. My body wakes me up, telling me it's time to get up because the sun has risen, but as soon as I do, I feel like shit and is sleepy and unproductive all day. I can't win. Oversleeping, undersleeping, and getting that 7-9 hours all just feels the same, and it's getting worse slowly over time.",4.641903269144648,3.6243770147783287,5.383627407075681,89.33417823555756,69.49261083743842,8.367039856695028,26.336318853560233,6.980632752743323,0.8260679802955657,726,16,179,5,11,237,106,203,0.11800000000000001,0.8290000000000001,0.053,-0.9302,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,0,1,13,5,1,0,7,0,8,10,9,2,4,34,26,19,0,0,6,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,18,10,0,1,6,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,5,23,4,22,25,8,30,0,0,0,0,4,12,1,1,13,113,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901800541059838,0.09383151568098563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13748392846766275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505183336968761,0.0,0.12588571989253886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07272564807262208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280743557017998,0.08056105761916983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4124142085563087,0.0,0.12817663149446976,0.09458395022214816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101744630205868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11914495615530832,0.0,0.0,0.11105317997778652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619740174003808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05509245863456271,0.0,0.0,0.0997956060249437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329001663514544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828970188417911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17152938802651774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575412209379195,0.0,0.0,0.5642442280462852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201950509744345,0.0,0.09427860108796292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19712736712639775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225680063247229,0.0,0.0,0.19726674445975126,0.1296095448288071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15312333331177086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17901903651925224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491962104648402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rivht,2020/03/15,"I've been accused of hurting the mental health profession. I just did a few AMAs today about my (pretty miserable) involuntary stay in a mental hospital last month, and when I admitted I lied about no longer being suicidal (why I was in there, suicidal ideation) just to get out of there, someone went on a tirade toward me saying I harmed the mental health profession and now the hospital I was at will use the treatments they used on me thinking they will work because I lied just to get out.  I don't know much about mental health but I'm pretty sure I hurt no one and no one's going to die because of me, or am I wrong and did I just do something horribly wrong?",5.6243181818181816,5.880887189393937,6.2207575757575775,79.85113636363639,67.25757575757576,9.630303030303034,30.893939393939394,9.516144504307137,2.665012121212121,527,19,103,10,8,172,76,132,0.299,0.644,0.057,-0.9874,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,1,11,7,0,1,7,0,11,3,0,2,1,18,21,7,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,6,0,2,6,1,17,1,17,12,2,16,0,3,0,0,4,8,0,1,5,73,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344089928144627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061831772567895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150878847675673,0.0,0.07152667887288347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4013360829088199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26946220026028583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916698604691894,0.10258917059949806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5073316641475045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045679684008936,0.0,0.0925184002276107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17056612134562826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560809291757253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008548203335252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663710266259514,0.09688984523376057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414540096615293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753313564328207,0.0,0.11861748163519514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064323293507361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929646135566252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21739778390040432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11666946905036946,0.11356516858917083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162442831658264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752068408561301,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SFadle98,2020/03/15,"Help me Hi, 21 M here. I feel like my whole life and mind is spiralling down into a crappy depression and I feel absolutely terrible. I hate myself, the way I look, the way I think, how my anxiety restricts me compared to so many others who are comfortable in public. I have no hobbies anymore, I feel like my best friends are replacing me as they’re starting to hang out with someone much more and put me on the back burner. There’s a lot of stress in my family at the moment. I’ve never been in a relationship and feel so alone right now. I hate my university degree and hate the future I’m going to get from it. Everything feels so bad, I feel like giving up, I never feel like I’m going to get a break.",3.0913918495297814,4.338628220689657,4.931598746081509,83.18373040752353,73.6896551724138,8.031347962382446,24.905956112852664,8.575989854853784,1.6132068965517234,552,17,114,10,11,189,92,145,0.23,0.617,0.153,-0.9329,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,8,14,3,1,9,0,5,1,0,1,2,22,25,10,0,0,0,0,7,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,8,0,0,4,3,7,0,0,1,8,20,7,17,24,5,24,0,1,1,0,7,10,0,1,11,75,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196074563496146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747008171517256,0.0,0.12635879206329534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979722150740228,0.1063839713593078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133711376886328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974005088718486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450998426935532,0.0,0.12011300286233258,0.0,0.4509645073050467,0.3640935685999625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843844808631574,0.0,0.1331353646292047,0.12222551437544905,0.1448227237549291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773798851442233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540179731703985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999509487007146,0.24898890928202855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699426539811732,0.0,0.0,0.10832140444425478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291761018241371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286501294983978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936627208864499,0.0,0.19653648321747147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808458055408636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13679315689103494,0.0,0.10880943142717588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079560515341208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018310111863942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14595039055096198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164067471115448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022679498627628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14225131338126287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamjustventing,2020/03/15,"I think I have something, but do not know where to go Trigger warning: self-harm and bingeing. I just needed to talk about my past and need help on what to do. I am not sure if this is the correct place, but here we go.

This is a bit of a rant type thing, but I just needed to get things off my chest. I am from the United States. I am a Sophmore in college and am starting to realize that I might have more problems than I thought. For multiple years in high school, I self-harmed. Even though I haven't self-harmed in years, I still have suicidal thoughts and panic attacks. I have idolized suicide multiple times, and have even considered following through, but I could never do it because I do not want to hurt my mom. My biological dad disowned me when I was 10, and me and my stepdad have had a lot of issues. We fought like cats and dogs, and he has single-handedly made me feel terrible about myself. My parents knew about my self-harm but never did anything. My guess is they didn't know what to do and/or didn't want to make the problem worse. I have had bingeing issues since I was 12. When I was 13, I got really into pro-ana websites, but at 14 I started seriously restricting and bingeing. I use to eat so much and felt like I was out of my body. I remember one time I binged on a loaf of stale bread, and have eaten so much multiple times where I have puked (I never purposefully purged, I was just so full it happened). I have been bingeing for years, and still do to this day. I will spend up to $50 dollars on cheap food just to eat as much as I can. In college, I have felt suicidal, but haven't relapsed on self-harm. Just a lot of bingeing. I have never been able to hold down a friendship because for one reason or another I cut people out. I cut them out of my life and isolate myself. I have had and lost so many friends, it is so frustrating. But every friendship breakup is because I chose to do it. I have never told a soul about my bingeing, no one outside of my parents knows about my self-harm, and I have NEVER told ANYONE about my suicidal thoughts. To be honest, I have always avoided deep relationships, and have never had a boyfriend.

My mom is an alcoholic, and tonight she almost chocked. She was saying things like, ""you don't understand my pain"", and it clicked in my head how mental illness runs in my family. And maybe how all the loneliness, sadness, pain, anger, and problems I have had in my life isn't because I am bad or wrong, but it is because I have something I have never sought help for. Maybe I don't need to feel this way and life can be beautiful. Now there's just one problem. I am in between colleges, broke, but want to seek help. I do not think that right now is a good time to bring things up to my parents, and would rather do it on my own. Any advice?",3.7636971830985932,4.703322200704228,4.469478873239439,88.31038028169014,71.7112676056338,7.4405633802816915,28.284507042253523,7.645422480735847,1.4891343661971832,2182,80,467,25,40,699,242,568,0.20800000000000002,0.7020000000000001,0.091,-0.9973,3,1,3,0,0,1,82.0,2,1,2,1,33,29,6,2,15,0,73,15,3,7,11,108,112,48,4,15,24,6,4,3,1,3,7,1,0,0,19,29,6,3,17,0,3,5,20,22,0,4,29,6,80,7,64,77,10,62,1,4,1,0,24,29,0,8,29,340,99,6,0.05932451745472586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057971231860595,0.0,0.06339986742128084,0.05940493482211617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04936275091033949,0.0,0.0,0.040342706193599684,0.062206929151244976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041481081968079814,0.0,0.0488190230887613,0.0,0.0,0.06749020297016163,0.0,0.0,0.049533494087946564,0.18081837605068726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476700814524937,0.06589616513707318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047365799907678786,0.0,0.0,0.038259405963420166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214075834764066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836656855199403,0.0,0.049983464601063884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05592587530946986,0.0,0.05999251705482974,0.0,0.11392168016641388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173544198833394,0.0,0.045833975024692886,0.0,0.030994611840932832,0.0,0.06743098080712387,0.04975859060835757,0.04744723600635069,0.0,0.06535264428161734,0.0,0.05246047486298648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06088407003224877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929192062823353,0.06267960983294248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350812291413821,0.0,0.0,0.12383876645843896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780960996885947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570798333806105,0.08694888789376745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475971871801164,0.10087116655037562,0.0,0.05613429282248485,0.03959957606345715,0.060145749347888536,0.11919890308075128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978516031894556,0.06293393804370875,0.0,0.13896031568897252,0.0,0.0,0.13083103888706368,0.17595351197779208,0.3660378008126196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160799313431606,0.0,0.12625093852261224,0.06960453905177624,0.19761856815049386,0.0,0.05663196461960567,0.04112815074974597,0.0,0.06198149416029203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22706220501234395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0380048049725848,0.06099548442788781,0.0,0.06369233016549529,0.06720311365267756,0.05066281376267953,0.0,0.04717723739177622,0.0,0.0600395788490118,0.0,0.0,0.3713304594107021,0.0,0.0,0.0490738538811972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09134182374067676,0.0,0.0,0.08398039759214118,0.0,0.09475327254389464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595655733466388,0.0,0.05591265562425357,0.0,0.0,0.04768279995732707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15765029336104375,0.07602551073192519,0.0582860371922411,0.14129112073844546,0.13837041281192988,0.0,0.0,0.1133742374486684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06175891486184752,0.0,0.05123733558128666,0.0,0.0,0.10497341232013292,0.04708904062656825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060456751521682436,0.04214243509627893,0.0648620469179726,0.0,0.11460913263040955
mentalhealth,pandchicka,2020/03/15,"I just want to be ok I am sick of feeling this way. Depressed, negative and worthless. On paper my life is perfect. I have a very supportive husband who loves me unconditionally. We have 7 kids who are all awesome and healthy. I love my job. I am supposed to graduate college in May. 

But inside I am falling apart. Last year I had a 4.0 GPA and this semester I am barely scraping my C- average that I need to graduate. I have random spaz attacks where everything comes out, and then I end up pushing my husband away. He tries so hard to get me through my attacks, but I somehow always end up making things worse. I hate it. I hate hearing voices telling me that I should kill my self. I hate knowing that everyone would be better off without me and happier not having to deal with me and my emotions.

I don’t really want to die. I love my husband and our children more than anything. But I feel like a huge burden. They walk around on egg shells trying not to upset me and I hate that it has to be that way. I want them to all be happy and have someone better in their lives who wouldn’t put them through so much. 

I just want to be ok.",1.941011857707512,4.0193169826087,3.4681422924901213,88.81841897233204,79.17391304347827,6.094861660079053,26.541501976284586,7.1686216300943375,1.2973478260869555,886,37,182,11,22,292,132,230,0.215,0.597,0.188,-0.9357,1,0,0,0,0,1,25.0,2,0,4,3,8,22,7,1,3,2,23,7,0,1,3,40,43,15,2,8,8,3,3,1,0,4,3,2,0,3,13,14,1,0,3,0,0,5,6,11,0,0,1,5,42,11,26,33,4,25,0,2,0,3,22,13,0,3,6,133,55,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641247262546912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535049486396166,0.103148170961747,0.0,0.2636359289686643,0.10886294580215254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049538170835606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981107274611116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11945607739489353,0.09979798887924664,0.0,0.1202539563404774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303372762477182,0.205251473153456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11071800459730498,0.10413578310095667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717391761224237,0.08277699348685894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605368848077115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334493862432346,0.10379606154295176,0.4575874626920751,0.0,0.0,0.1305930313754311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498232133472044,0.0,0.1281921238064054,0.0,0.06367869273708611,0.09444887866483734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184185631791932,0.056607847815581314,0.0,0.10231464354743412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31372948301841314,0.0,0.07734360368474827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517720833786735,0.08591555800712446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164805687841393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422878894474531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087686596574435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981756135827316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148701705597174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012748048929576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697836077185248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573351882264577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560424080639618,0.2733706706662227,0.18394318617351105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169379269310736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808063354686545,0.0823101690072049,0.0,0.0,0.0746159783681724
mentalhealth,lilsbug,2020/03/15,"Zyprexa made me pass out I was walking into work feeling very dizzy, I assumed it was from the medication I took yesterday night (trazadone) but I never felt it that strong. I go to clock in and feel my hard body feeling chills and feeling extremely dizzy then I pass out on the ground and apparently had a mini seizure. Has that happened to anyone else?",6.769179104477612,7.18082080597015,6.2648880597014935,79.98001865671642,64.82089552238807,9.088059701492536,36.15298507462686,8.841846274778883,3.010674626865671,282,13,53,4,4,87,50,67,0.08800000000000001,0.777,0.135,0.4963,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,4,2,1,1,1,15,13,5,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,6,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,6,6,8,1,8,7,0,16,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,1,5,33,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17360968078752695,0.2544017721308428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27579348589250435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20741388526497048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5021702058564403,0.0,0.23839670507737945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110855476386872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21956144494817195,0.0,0.22241848123829386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349373785776467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25012539048007754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149604693335864,0.0,0.0,0.233002727679523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758585944675779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20486470993217268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18075759792784374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway84837716,2020/03/15,"I don't want to accept it... I've come to the conclusion that I don't want to accept my reality. U don't want to accept my flaws, my depression...I think it's because my mental well being scares me. I'm scared of being labeled ""insane"" I'm scared of being labeled ""depressed"" I'm scared of my doctor telling me I might be slightly psychotic. I'm not ready for this, I'm not prepared to face this. I never have been. The meds don't help, they all make me feel off. I'm left to wallow in my own sadness and I feel like I'm withering away. I guess I'm just scared of being me. I'm starting to subconsciously distance me away from myself. I feel like everything that's happened to me for the past couple of months have been out of my control. I don't think anymore, I don't have my mental voice anymore, my head feels wiped every 2 seconds, I've started hitting myself in the head to try to hit myself back to normal. I'm fucked up right now. I don't even know why, and I'm fucked up. I don't feel like me anymore. I just want to scream. I just need to tell someone, just want someone to hear me out and not judge me. I just want to be who I know as me.",0.948957929941912,2.6782229311740906,2.9780179545854617,92.8392360499912,80.82186234817814,5.429255412779441,21.670304523851428,6.280692351149826,0.2124854427037497,892,27,202,7,23,301,105,247,0.20199999999999999,0.758,0.04,-0.9845,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,1,2,9,17,2,5,4,0,20,6,3,2,2,41,58,4,0,8,8,0,5,3,0,1,1,3,0,0,7,6,0,1,13,0,0,1,12,10,1,1,2,8,38,7,34,47,2,19,0,2,0,2,6,11,2,2,10,122,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28672480591564986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810889675046362,0.07410396985053529,0.0,0.058747358219395925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301577720472643,0.0,0.0,0.1080891746715268,0.0,0.1066335699051226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300489497145594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864062668218593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365266871241958,0.0,0.08119740272255463,0.0,0.08661276480755545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436424028686205,0.20654411158755664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17818836277495773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616440895146337,0.0,0.08522126944308897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978105516795848,0.0,0.10861802903100283,0.0,0.06459598988123184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592684806418208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470824879372076,0.0,0.0,0.14124718890411248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643289285952884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070473505830768,0.0,0.19424022636264354,0.10223525625997833,0.0,0.0,0.07692305581073214,0.0,0.0,0.07145847274962873,0.07432787763282593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442390784258477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199779316797722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230099543876983,0.0,0.0,0.4824249481497288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633110363386793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364249200913576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16846641175437074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350232344551472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06543013000919883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3410555271967757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664982704715676,0.0,0.08696056490280005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MonochromeTapir,2020/03/15,"Phobia and lowering mental health Hi! I'm quite new to reddit and mental health communities and curious to hear about like-minded persons.

I am over 25 and have been suffering of a paralysing agoraphobia for a few years. No job, back to my parents' place, friends all far away, the idea of leaving house for ""unsafe"" places makes me sick (so no outside activity)...
I enjoy being fed, having my family around and time for hobbies, but it is not enough to make me happy anymore. I am trying hypnosis with a pro.

I know something deeper than the phobia is ""blocking"" me from improving but I can't figure what. After a very painful commute in february, I even started considering death as a suitable solution if I don't improve, thoughts that used to scare me. I haven't had future plans in years and don't know what I even want except healing.  The self-loathing is so bad I don't want/feel like improving skills or exercising. I am however not depressed (I sleep, eat, do things and am generally not sad, etc.)

I have good parents I see every day, good friends and a good long-distance partner I message often, but none of them can help me. It feels lonely and helpless, enough to rant online like this, haha. I used to be functional and my life is currently hopeless.

Is it abuse to share such dark feelings with the persons who care about me? Would rejecting my partner/friends for their sake be reasonable to protect them? Do you have tips on therapies that could help with agoraphobia? Does anyone have experiences about phobia making someone consider dying? I am open to any experience or support you guys feel like sharing.

Thank you for reading this!",4.869117647058825,6.9730609052287615,5.341116339869284,78.57022352941179,70.66666666666667,8.163973856209154,31.521045751633984,8.841846274778883,2.827377673202613,1311,59,227,25,25,419,184,306,0.192,0.599,0.209,0.8270000000000001,6,2,1,0,1,1,49.0,0,3,3,3,11,26,0,1,10,1,30,10,1,6,1,46,50,19,2,4,10,2,3,3,3,1,7,1,0,4,11,15,2,2,9,2,0,0,11,10,0,0,4,5,33,16,35,41,6,20,0,7,1,0,22,10,0,4,13,153,44,2,0.0,0.11399132391022107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542506968318335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541296622799576,0.06727121044562001,0.0,0.0,0.08564595001990125,0.0,0.0,0.09039103968841193,0.07397838722181821,0.08033006726925009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809096354685308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681464760168327,0.0,0.0,0.0620465144103566,0.0,0.08286422810937115,0.0,0.0998492192193252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419269453088774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984452997636406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988181685985324,0.10729789357547756,0.12708959542133014,0.0,0.08105979898419262,0.0,0.0,0.18822072074994495,0.09069679836687748,0.0,0.19458360527160173,0.137462723398215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22299131313532625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420853407007134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095261527123819,0.0,0.1024157224517757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045302436428988,0.10843395606380156,0.0,0.12897304050103872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101167577032936,0.0,0.10860767027905134,0.0,0.0,0.09547207724951112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057473357916487,0.0,0.0,0.10187089537989656,0.0,0.0,0.06795489896122284,0.18801042653661568,0.0,0.0,0.08514148270131312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926597346452106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19391105103939946,0.0,0.09714314501288678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291875539638347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237261242181664,0.0,0.2136562766330267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16801107827086673,0.20103478210136885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232956751277353,0.09623452149094933,0.0,0.0,0.09891834722002844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632147830047302,0.0,0.07666570727359852,0.0,0.10036643330208696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627796672633243,0.0,0.08151713807119318,0.07406599292750125,0.0,0.0,0.06809686164978891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917624991351496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857584799072926,0.11002278851750334,0.0,0.0639166431921028,0.0,0.0,0.07637879137777831,0.056099941937878664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531924677662128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618648410443784,0.0,0.0793820768070799,0.1134925155651526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834374817499234,0.0,0.0,0.12391022146920072
mentalhealth,CichaelMlifford,2020/03/15,"I feel overwhelmed by everything going on right now At the moment, I am just so overwhelmed by everything going on in the world (and in my life). My university is moving to online classes which I really dislike for several reasons, many of my international friends are flying back to their countries to be with their families, concerts (usually one of the happiest places in the world for me) I bought tickets for ages in advance are suddenly canceled or postponed, the panic shopping completely messes up my grocery shopping schedule and discourages me from even stepping into stores, my spring break vacation will likely not happen and all my sports practices are canceled too so basically all the fun things are not happening right now and I really don't know what to do. 
My boyfriend just told me that I've been spending way too much time on my phone lately and I'm trying to change it but right now, I feel like my head is just too busy dealing with everything. In addition to all of this, I'll get my wisdom teeth removed next week and I already had two panic attacks from just thinking about it. I normally handle changes quite well but at the moment, I have a hard time adjusting to everything because too much happened all of a sudden.

If anyone has some tips on how to handle this, I would be super grateful. 

Also, I would definitely appreciate suggestions for some fun hobbies/activities to try in the mean time, preferably involving no phones. I'm a woman in my early 20s, unfortunately not very artistic or creative and I enjoy sports and programming.",9.588255639097747,8.761547547368423,9.159110275689226,65.65460526315792,59.49122807017544,12.072681704260653,41.409774436090224,11.20814326018867,4.854082706766919,1261,60,201,28,14,406,167,285,0.07400000000000001,0.768,0.158,0.982,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,3,19,16,1,4,11,0,18,3,2,2,4,43,33,17,0,5,12,0,3,2,1,3,1,1,0,1,8,12,0,1,8,7,5,6,5,7,1,2,4,4,28,9,39,24,8,48,0,3,0,0,10,21,0,5,21,149,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225774286144144,0.08882910421507663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766837952674954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636735711613173,0.0,0.08541219070475517,0.0,0.06771216945267833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350117703998203,0.0,0.11646325847454395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145166279187008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07336602735180607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3993192807419128,0.0,0.10471453257280232,0.0,0.11232883430969977,0.07935420591475545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581865270960759,0.0,0.058033714684643564,0.0,0.12625647067785725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946779504170597,0.0,0.0995041459451848,0.0,0.11399816094567493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06104561041641815,0.0,0.12530091777919278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845773620334517,0.10853428284181177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261574350609445,0.0,0.12099659791086642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805842512368807,0.1633103461473311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813280324766284,0.0,0.10883293891009836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526938492622481,0.0,0.0,0.26065239860512096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116052956761856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814521596597358,0.0,0.0,0.14231893077052513,0.11420677111577356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845802322784716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254866186080173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737953437828068,0.07117435154880886,0.0,0.0,0.19431157339061084,0.0,0.0,0.10613987009180484,0.0,0.15082945632884326,0.0,0.1085071484894548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12233681731982682,0.0916510529278769,0.0,0.08816861338740367,0.08910013943148681,0.0,0.09987253810036396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15781336879100302,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,christodagama,2020/03/15,"For those who recovered from recurrent major depression, did the cognitive abilities return? If not, were you able to retrain your brain to regain these abilities? 

Research seems to indicate MDD diminishes abilities in 7 cognitive domains: attention, response inhibition, verbal memory, executive function, cognitive flexibility, decision speed, and information processing.  


I read many recovery stories, and try to follow their advice, but still find myself greatly diminished in the cognitive functions, which impairs my ability to feel integrated into work, social, and overall qol.",13.778470588235296,15.800981670588234,13.112941176470587,31.32823529411766,49.941176470588246,18.094117647058823,55.82352941176471,15.6451,10.850576470588233,482,33,42,24,5,159,72,85,0.046,0.848,0.106,0.5283,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,2,1,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,2,1,1,0,0,13,5,5,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,6,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,1,6,1,10,3,1,7,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,2,3,31,10,3,0.29142650143437016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847786043580885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32532835613140904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510052186539873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735399551183426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663585426747873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212987466573216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29546073125635514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29150536558447504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653037416919195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29707261800762397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327335804964465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19785946473597105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21216196391710185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reddswishaa,2020/03/16,"im sad (vent) so this is my first time on a group page like this and it feels relieving to know that i might have this as an outlet and opportunity to let it out. i’m sorry if this isn’t what you usually see on your page but if anyone could help me feel less alone that’d b cool. so i constantly am sad sometimes i think i’m too in my head and that’s bad because i constantly overthink. i’ve dealt with depression for a couple years it on and off yk sometimes i feel ok and other times i feel like i could die. i have a boyfriend but as much as i love him u know the way he treats me isn’t right but i also don’t know how or what to do im way too attached to him and i let him do anything and everything he proved to me that i wasn’t worth anything and made me realize i don’t matter ik he’s not a bad person and is trying to help but he’s done not bad than good(sorry if this doesn’t make sense i’m all over the place right not but ever since i got with him and i caught him doing things i didn’t appreciate i fell back into my depression after 4 years, he made me feel worst of the worst idk what else to say",0.4144226086956522,1.962567124000003,2.573130434782609,95.97439130434783,81.75999999999998,6.107826086956522,18.469565217391306,7.079830092131019,-0.0850086956521734,871,19,219,11,23,295,128,250,0.193,0.682,0.126,-0.9752,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,2,8,17,0,0,8,2,22,2,1,4,3,47,41,26,1,5,12,0,5,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,17,14,0,0,11,0,1,2,10,9,0,1,7,8,32,8,24,28,7,26,0,4,1,1,18,11,0,5,13,138,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397845784481868,0.0,0.08800682724866271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694941562333217,0.0,0.1811233034313275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462154356620674,0.27566109004454026,0.06708536861100776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378495891558893,0.0,0.17573170469527574,0.12176806856024736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895715533244063,0.0,0.11421437221772662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126192075545409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193253043784773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995463920188612,0.0,0.0,0.09890571133145884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27822256014767793,0.07861963658313438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360834827956573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230459495970043,0.08801692025392509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129428980024372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14752819269904272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23774545060264365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814415625716184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250668604825279,0.0,0.10752959815388574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932428847409937,0.20826366257481552,0.07345913106508528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167455024211982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08089930405302963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609128634336084,0.11497867289878284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879639453894584,0.0,0.08751605975017543,0.0,0.0,0.08769548420452065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103437517489904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21768423609165294,0.2463835998193803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311223195862049,0.07051550183513475,0.0,0.0,0.12834190792842187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471662595517471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120436475357199,0.0,0.0,0.1747049009602055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14173699371026366
mentalhealth,TheBipolarSchizo,2020/03/16,"An honest Crisis Text Line review from a volunteer. I made a review of Crisis Text Line incase anyone is wondering what it's like to use the service.

Crisis Text Line is a suicide/crisis hotline that operates through text messages. I actually volunteered to work for them for a little while and used them a lot. As a result, I decided to give them an honest review. Please let me know if it is helpful for any of you guys.

https://www.thebipolarschizophrenic.com/reviews/crisis-text-line-review/",6.8535240963855415,10.17993234939759,6.085165662650603,69.9140135542169,68.87951807228916,7.523493975903612,26.037650602409638,8.472884824447931,2.238013253012048,407,13,58,7,8,124,54,83,0.136,0.7070000000000001,0.157,-0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,1,3,1,0,3,0,0,9,0,4,0,0,4,0,10,10,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,8,3,11,8,1,2,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,3,2,40,12,5,0.0,0.0,0.2575422965075257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17947078083827134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18453502189718507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531706543281709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26131665949379085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768961989486197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14504040284554912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26987026276311743,0.0,0.1289352010615279,0.26451147144257503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22437050873566974,0.0,0.24972210134613695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896986604500968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558744562507774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28620381141363466,0.1921327609174068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,batshitcrazy1234,2020/03/16,In need of some help from mental health experts I have a list of mental problems that i need answers to its driving me nuts please someone who is a professional please post on this,6.967428571428571,7.035872742857144,6.406428571428571,80.30107142857145,64.42857142857143,8.142857142857144,34.64285714285714,7.1686216300943375,2.3047142857142857,146,6,27,1,2,45,29,35,0.131,0.679,0.191,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,6,4,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,18,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725410734221021,0.0,0.0,0.17185942907317198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5167815288085962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3802345115160208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5629001265615361,0.0,0.0,0.24556020126055936,0.0,0.0,0.24534004930096584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21724677892635028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EclekTech,2020/03/16,"NAMI Helpline status March 16, 2020 Noticed this today and wanted to share

>For the health and safety of our volunteers, the NAMI Helpline is temporarily unable to answer live phone calls.  
>  
>During this time, we will be answering voicemails and emails within 24 - 48 business hours of receipt. If you need immediate assistance, the Crisis Text Line is open 24/7 - text NAMI to 741741.  
>  
>We are working to enable live service and will keep the NAMI community updated.

[https://www.nami.org/find-support/nami-helpline](https://www.nami.org/find-support/nami-helpline)",14.340731707317074,16.813733560975617,10.520634146341463,48.84509756097564,48.7560975609756,10.950243902439025,37.13170731707317,10.793553405168565,4.566226341463413,480,17,53,9,5,137,62,82,0.047,0.897,0.057,-0.0258,0,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,2,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,0,6,1,0,0,0,12,9,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,7,6,0,7,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,5,27,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23120000102764465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4138873157885603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24067373237658146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22297796169234788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20125238251365302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39986578423185215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16788746355896172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257780521021734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.51387716722111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202724615995967,0.0,0.21461956078573372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335483047952693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16483636093716808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ComfortableLake3,2020/03/16,"Computer use Not sure if this the right place for this but has anyone experienced the effect of computers on your personality and sociability and mood?

I used to be a computer addict like 8-12 hours a day video games or poker or whatever. I took a complete binge of computers. I only now use computers as part of my sales job which is quite social in nature.

I have a deep phobia of the computer and internet and what it can do to my personality and extroversion.

Can anyone relate?

Is there science behind this?

Should I be worried that by using a computer or screen for 6 hours a day will change my personality, make me less social, and unattractive?

I literally am thinking don’t use screens as much as possible unless needed for a job or messaging something already planned to someone as extreme as this sounds.

I’ve personally found myself to be more happy the less screen time I have and the more I love my “life”.

What should I do?

Are my thoughts bullshit and just anxiety thoughts or is there a lot of basis to it and I should give them heed? I’m really confused.",4.597420731707317,6.384543678048782,5.984435975609754,74.97762957317077,70.75609756097559,9.222560975609756,29.88567073170732,9.673873057562805,2.991396341463415,854,35,155,21,16,288,119,205,0.10800000000000001,0.809,0.083,-0.4777,2,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,3,4,6,0,1,13,0,20,3,0,7,1,37,35,22,0,5,10,0,0,1,0,4,2,1,0,4,10,9,0,0,5,3,1,1,2,1,0,0,4,5,19,4,23,24,7,12,0,0,3,1,12,5,0,8,7,113,29,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773374587164396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293011736698218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963553694219571,0.0,0.0,0.1638574530949317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239514406624862,0.0,0.12285162268773127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15113127528629094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284720148182502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240115342361533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247307676393834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23077977521604434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325483860950212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276138184038268,0.05724385930383431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961464152729968,0.10575145248339857,0.0,0.07821258956540998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613420785526096,0.08688085317415176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911386783256348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12688483514791515,0.0,0.0,0.40923698555196575,0.12241881467724368,0.0,0.0,0.13209276009045925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246258406670357,0.0,0.0,0.07506277865376533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006344140400687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23888227128887196,0.0992786553077646,0.09020400318096078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043233338771444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507848136869197,0.0,0.1860414602729472,0.06832338487609936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018135422737453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5059908585665921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899289473879728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Misery_personified,2020/03/16,"I feel as though my destiny is suicide. Every day the call of the nothing wraps its acrid tendrils around me, the demon whispers sweet fallacies into my brain. I can never escape unless I follow. You see, I know the truth about psychiatry.

Pseudoscientist, we are their guinea pigs to experiment on. Keeping me alive just to watch me suffer.

Regurgitating useless fallacies and platitudes before locking is away in abusive prisons of hell.

Testing poisons on us, tied down and injected, the sharp burn and tingle of the needle. 

Brainwashing others that everything is okay, that they only want to help. Even the victims of psychiatry follow along like blind sheep. 

when WE are the only aware ones.

Hands wrap around me, pulling me under the dark water once more. But I follow, I come to peace. I will take my own life.

The heavy black wave crushing me. I am tormented, destroyed, bitter, miserable.

Help? HELP?? There is no help. 

Layers stacked on layers of reality. 

The simulation is tricking them all, I can't believe it. But others have, labeled as ""crazy"" and such.

The puppeteer must have a reason I've been chosen to find out, maybe I will meet him on the other side, which will come soon. 

My destiny is my near demise.",3.813106060606057,6.762657340909094,4.290454545454549,80.62901515151516,77.86363636363636,6.3939393939393945,25.984848484848484,7.645422480735847,1.780121212121212,965,37,160,15,24,304,149,220,0.182,0.7020000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.9639,0,0,0,0,0,1,42.0,3,1,3,0,10,13,6,1,14,1,18,7,2,1,4,27,29,11,1,2,4,0,3,1,0,4,4,1,0,0,8,13,1,1,4,0,0,6,3,9,0,1,1,11,29,4,28,24,3,24,2,3,4,0,14,14,1,0,5,116,37,1,0.0,0.1902422631194048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858722716762216,0.0,0.0,0.15085530517728746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662826626943744,0.18090081426162885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792426941075132,0.16395395017164238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766235972807805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355059416095266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605110732342096,0.0,0.13528222217071825,0.0,0.14430470555262165,0.15706254938155145,0.0,0.0,0.08118605908542137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467527250169834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.430491063085341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271679475737725,0.0,0.0,0.08824185819481929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341120819524353,0.07844353369941705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130827082295615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12383697160560556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406563318485406,0.0,0.0,0.17099558041400698,0.10880242405250592,0.24423254404654926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16508668900091553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794883992106545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17563112041958398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12072425898813648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15775346298671095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19313890373659195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947048962482176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kirsterino-is-fuego,2020/03/16,"I’m not very good at just being myself I apologize for the flair-less title, but I can’t think of a better one at the moment. I think this year has been one of the worst for my mental health that I’ve ever had. I started dating this boy in August. Everything has been really good. He’s very kind, loving, and understanding and he tries to help me the best he can. We always throw witty conversation back and forth and we play argue a lot because that’s just how our personalities are. Well, he’s very smart and witty and good at a lot of things. My last boyfriend wasn’t really like he is (not really intelligent) and I think it makes me feel like I’m less than him. I constantly think that I need to be more witty and come up with interesting things to say. I always feel the need to be better and sometimes it gets to the point where I get mad at myself and feel stupid because I can’t do something he does. My patience is wearing for some reason as well. I feel cornered when I get simple criticism from someone and I always blow things out or proportion. There’s a voice in my head that constantly ridicules myself and it’s not just with my boyfriend, it’s with everyone. I think I have very low self esteem and a underlying need to better everyone else. Maybe even anger issues. I was just wondering if anyone else has gone through this or what they did to try and get out of those negative mindsets. I don’t want to be a toxic person and I hope it’s good that I recognize these things so I can work on them. I just want to be the best I can be and accept myself for who I am. Any input would be widely appreciated. Thank you so much!",2.7679084687767315,4.4812424161676665,4.14777159965783,86.57121257485035,75.437125748503,7.286398631308813,21.50940975192472,8.07648339933343,0.9255050470487594,1293,32,271,21,28,427,166,334,0.13699999999999998,0.6559999999999999,0.207,0.9799,0,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,3,1,2,6,16,28,5,0,13,0,29,4,2,3,1,62,58,25,0,8,12,0,4,2,0,1,1,2,0,4,21,24,0,0,13,1,0,3,8,7,2,2,7,6,41,21,35,43,9,30,0,1,0,1,24,16,0,8,13,190,62,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21891199976933412,0.0,0.0,0.05963675258555985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061319560726547616,0.08985561660130256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06743333704939589,0.0,0.10691816958147776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18406451947834546,0.2326817720587542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554292834722452,0.0,0.1895379218657331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674395942662247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14651865351449114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05792283290673288,0.07932667169805524,0.0,0.16759588005465584,0.07881612515264932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17736831433244152,0.06265052880137582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832715920417282,0.0,0.0,0.29422327226898465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000209860713712,0.09321747455112796,0.0,0.0,0.05878123893343627,0.0,0.0,0.08710259509386632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915325541169884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913226015906975,0.0,0.07148450244195477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856883404569893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491131698928002,0.07914968150663816,0.0,0.058538217760020175,0.0,0.08810310663572526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837763131504134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644671534855819,0.1950779406695704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885108580754987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314672426016884,0.0,0.0,0.08290171275652769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16854222473345648,0.09016679734388792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06973992325903858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148676768272754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430511603848139,0.06751319206246965,0.08673426319164172,0.0,0.06207216453458981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073932450143106,0.0,0.0,0.23304712120936186,0.2809624713791479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908058418449832,0.0,0.0,0.09129534116759318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289435795617567,0.1034515531102524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15769970230550542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510331325576664,0.06384423064798138,0.0,0.0,0.062297208400673,0.0,0.0,0.05647378945383112
mentalhealth,incessant-screaming,2020/03/16,"is there a difference between chronic depression, major depression, and clinical depression? i've been trying to find out the difference, but i can't. i know symptoms and such can overlap, but i can't find anything that clearly compares them. anybody up to help?",6.02695652173913,8.7248327826087,6.338478260869567,70.10163043478265,69.0,9.817391304347826,41.934782608695656,10.125756701596842,5.386495652173912,212,14,30,6,4,68,34,46,0.145,0.701,0.154,0.3421,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,5,3,0,0,1,9,6,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,4,0,5,5,1,3,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,23,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19753971768449904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6202610666094681,0.0,0.0,0.5015998306982171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4388005281748158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089965777000445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319245485170134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24950262731811884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16297738521669086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,a-ordinary-weeaboo,2020/03/16,"I wanna go back to my old high school and attack the son of a bitch who harassed me I’m 17 years old and I changed schools due to a mental breakdown. 

However, during my time at this school this guy named kyrie, a very fucking obnoxious skinny black kid with a big ego who thinks they’re tough harassed me in school. 

One time he even got his friends to harass me while I was talking to a friend. and one of them tapped my chest and another got close to my face and called me a pussy. 
I got angry and swung at him... but I missed... he dodged my punch. 

I felt so fucking embarrassed and humiliated that i developed a grudge against this guy and his friends

I’ve been feeling so worthless and angry and filled with hatred that I cannot stop thinking of hurting this motherfucker. I don’t even care if I go to Jail Or get killed. I hate myself because I’m a coward, I’m not intelligent, or talented, I’m not funny or charming or anything worthy of taking notice of.

I plan to wear a mask, being a baseball bat, and filled a Bucket with feces mixed with water, vomit, and rotten eggs. 

I plan to wait till school ends and when he comes out, I’ll pour the bucket over his head and attack him with the baseball bat. My immense hatred and anger fuels my motivation and once school starts again I’m gonna go through with it.",5.229136792452831,5.355307147169814,5.608242924528302,84.35387382075474,68.09433962264151,8.134433962264152,28.637971698113212,7.645422480735847,1.5499481132075474,1034,32,214,10,16,331,149,265,0.312,0.614,0.07400000000000001,-0.9978,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,3,7,23,11,1,14,0,5,10,5,1,0,42,31,27,1,2,8,1,2,0,3,1,1,0,0,3,9,25,3,2,5,0,0,6,4,17,0,2,6,4,31,6,28,23,0,28,0,3,1,2,21,8,3,5,14,121,40,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713272701279353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840760851718535,0.0,0.0,0.2324631544907453,0.0,0.07856137746453606,0.0,0.062281054489079314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432560431092976,0.0,0.10416773739549187,0.0,0.10808087376431898,0.08800923650442233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049108954871644,0.0,0.0,0.1349628459427356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05165953407552834,0.0,0.0980979163304586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368057128632597,0.1889065222279724,0.053378897407857326,0.0,0.17419437732050333,0.0,0.2451407834433292,0.0,0.0,0.2023260325419824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087037970217196,0.10485450002416924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794677733045828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937364194128747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303446232644256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029619585350888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163196735105685,0.21441760157927087,0.10880626689697746,0.13846422886290394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6204007076274919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231548906545454,0.0,0.0,0.08541755762957669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681810203865957,0.08211928254188268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093107791012926,0.0,0.0,0.11915071089899115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429982774915816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0657932542606522
mentalhealth,nauseababy,2020/03/16,"How to stop overreacting In my relationship I always end up overreacting, and acting out even though I dont want to and it's at the point where it's hurting my relationship severely.

Just got a place together but I'm always afraid he's going to find someone else or better and so I always get upset and think he's going to leave. I also take things to heart right away and get super defensive.
I try to stop but then I overthink until I get angry and then I don't mean to take it out on him but I do.

I feel horrible and I'm unsure on what do to. The past few months we have gone through a lot, so I feel it might be due to stress but things are going good and yet I still act out.",0.9618367346938792,2.78081753061225,3.2750680272108887,90.28362244897959,81.17687074829931,6.37687074829932,18.663265306122447,7.447530270364453,0.2785591836734689,535,12,122,8,14,184,85,147,0.19399999999999998,0.7140000000000001,0.092,-0.9128,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,2,10,8,1,3,4,0,8,1,1,1,0,30,25,21,0,1,6,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,12,0,3,5,0,0,6,2,5,0,0,2,2,16,3,20,21,2,30,0,1,0,0,6,13,0,3,11,82,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433180229751982,0.3568835616634401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13432354678137684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12644395865916874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755793588955392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943177845773828,0.0,0.12662759423293876,0.0,0.0,0.0944293000437288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14457826846381394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067055547663406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22408531255195946,0.0,0.2437567614557803,0.11991513649579355,0.11434491436528005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694182786268156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15305066190040734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138292499335548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154664709641665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573453355470998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15166691175255242,0.0,0.0,0.11411603730630145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13647954422254735,0.0,0.0,0.14937158069738948,0.0,0.13515137839736452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069891800451308,0.0,0.12209425856592235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16151363223182236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113668729704424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114174773356782,0.23905601936782345,0.1637698542120671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21498893434052693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18996374511275035,0.0916083975160862,0.1404657571738485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706617968294702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432648455202069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thrtrans,2020/03/16,"I believe my mom has some psychological problems Ever since I was a kid, or at least since i was 8-9 she always believed people were ""going into our house"" while we were out (it was just her and me, absent father) and I even remember her going to our next-door neighbour's house to yell at them once, convinced they were, as I said, ""going into our house"". It continued on to this day, with me being 19 year old now, still living with her. We've moved countless times, and the same delusion happens in every place. The specifics of it are: she think people are ""stealing her documents"" and are out to destroy her life basically. She believes neighbours are in on it, family (who she doesn't talk to) and even me. Well she isn't specifically accusing me of ""letting people get inside"", but she asks me once in a while ""Was anyone here today?"" when she comes home, sometimes says stuff like ""Remember, don't let anyone inside"". As you can guess, this means I don't bring friends inside, she doesn't bring friends inside, and I have to stay home while she's out (unless it's for work or school) because she wants someone to be in the apartment ""so someone doesn't come in"".

 Anyway, writing all this has been cathartic, as I don't have any close friends to say it to and it was basically my ""dirty little secret"" for as long as I have known that there's something wrong with her. Sometimes I also probably repress it, choose to not think about it. But it has, combined with her general distrust of people, made an impact in my life.

 Anyway n.2, I'm stuck with her until I move out, and right now I'm planning to go to college, so that's not happening anytime soon- if anyone has advice for coping with this, similar experiences etc., don't hesitate to drop a comment. 

Also, sorry if this is not the appropriate subreddit, I'm happy to move my post somewhere more appropriate if so.",6.302279663246517,6.3433071574585655,6.6162825572217825,78.33004604051565,65.82320441988949,8.994685609050247,31.60273612207314,8.563005593585519,2.3927620099973685,1469,52,276,19,21,475,187,362,0.09699999999999999,0.855,0.048,-0.9571,0,0,1,0,0,0,68.0,4,1,2,2,20,13,2,1,8,0,34,2,0,1,2,55,57,31,0,5,12,2,0,1,5,0,2,4,2,1,19,24,0,1,8,0,0,11,11,6,1,0,12,4,45,7,50,41,6,52,0,0,0,0,42,21,0,7,18,202,64,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363185502625192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13688325084474434,0.07121288086059528,0.0,0.0,0.05820016665961485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17952731322816418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000964078567327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05217131230993361,0.0,0.0,0.2892721375554364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744635913754914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519470589511865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544896655912226,0.113055066965036,0.07741577656757358,0.0721083497980211,0.0,0.0,0.08371773518534997,0.08068113348609147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19836633955405944,0.0,0.04471419359017983,0.0,0.194557811871258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428060603034312,0.0,0.15136358802586902,0.0911059345312444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169579018049072,0.0,0.0,0.2962579052165833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17503121339223754,0.12090125280820402,0.04181209974694481,0.0857778165862584,0.07557238521972039,0.07573929239752601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098180577946824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322624498774763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023513907768003,0.0,0.2728872675797814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101972986685893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980618382674098,0.1822886840349038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23733313442584386,0.0,0.0894172362317439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819659719337682,0.0,0.09227420454508062,0.08189248702355648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939003494639824,0.07308840885098497,0.08141013900696238,0.13611992539941187,0.0,0.08661574358489471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415922105378435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14503036968343466,0.06588687108878119,0.16928985412511313,0.09580446526840283,0.0,0.09122133201147996,0.06834762431571173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797339250970268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878930954695807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967775373686647,0.0,0.0,0.049904814564049084,0.0,0.08112378084333569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05047975762575775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695044212194757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06230629105158751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357284864317454,0.0,0.055113395944849215
mentalhealth,ban1o,2020/03/16,"COVID-19 is really affecting my mental health and I don't know what to do. I've struggled with depression for years. Took breaks from school, gone through periods when I've done nothing but stay in bed all day. Failed many courses as a result. Terrible hygiene, binge eating, completely messy room.  Feeling completely hopeless about the future. Basically all the hallmark symptoms.  

 However I recently started doing so much better. I moved out of my parents finally into a student house. (the environment was very toxic but I was so afraid to move out because I thought the lack of accountability from them would make me worse). I started university again and developed a really set routine: Wake up every morning 7:30, shower, make breakfast, go to class. Study. I slept no later than 12:00. I started volunteering at multiple places. I cooked ALL my meals. I started to reconnect with friends I isolated myself from for years.  I was doing well academically. I even filed a petition to remove some of  my failed grades from my transcript. I was talking regularly to a counsellor and we actively were working on making good friends and getting out of my bubble. 

And then suddenly in the past week it seems like my whole life started crashing down. NBA (I'm a big fan)- cancelled. In person classes-cancelled, All my volunteering-cancelled. All the gyms-cancelled.  All the extracurricular activities I was in-cancelled. My church-cancelled. Even the public library is cancelled. All of my roommates were returning home so our house was empty and I was basically forced by my parents to come home. Now I'm essentially being forced to stay inside all the time. I honestly feel like everything I've worked so hard to maintain is falling apart. I have no chance of making friends now when nobody is even leaving their house.   But it's hard to express this to people without feeling like I'm complaining or being selfish. I've randomly burst into tears in the past few days. Just when I started doing well and thinking positively about my life and my future it seems like it was all snatched away. 

I had plans to also take classes during the spring term at my school (the spring term starts in May) but I don't even know if this will all be over by then. Trump literally just said on tv this could last until July or August. I feel like my life is over. 

For so long I avoided headlines about COVID-19. I even blocked words related to it on my twitter because I didn't want to surrounded myself with the hysteria and panic and I thought it was no big deal and people were overreacting. And now I can't avoid it. My parents constantly have the news on talking about it. It's all anyone is talking about around me. We visit a family friend yesterday and it was all they were talking about. I feel like I honestly don't know what to do. I know it seems dramatic but it always seems like something starts going wrong in my life when I start doing better. 

I'm just venting. I don't have anyone to talk to.",3.8195209542844464,6.614690005424952,4.474696868754165,80.26113701976462,76.6130198915009,7.280340090733162,29.4124234637226,8.31658001898498,2.5355962628089213,2395,109,408,47,57,763,261,553,0.15,0.72,0.13,-0.7731,5,2,1,0,0,1,70.0,3,0,3,7,31,31,0,5,21,0,44,12,2,6,12,83,87,35,0,5,12,3,7,7,4,3,6,1,5,1,17,25,4,3,16,2,1,10,10,13,2,0,23,8,60,18,69,57,19,88,0,4,0,0,25,29,0,10,52,278,77,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05067515784174867,0.052727034983548034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08861639271518976,0.0,0.0,0.05641072229229702,0.0,0.0,0.05953607656159063,0.0,0.0,0.07725677085549901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120872309266119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05458569603202367,0.13287973706618106,0.0684780138648443,0.0,0.05059398316945906,0.0,0.0,0.08173389851579273,0.06532935625731573,0.054578540593654565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484719762381541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484101658815446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092689692824691,0.0,0.053390052985624915,0.0,0.056950837677746925,0.0,0.059737464576965216,0.0,0.16020316367936366,0.18107970110338412,0.0,0.06941626048879992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19583103129334312,0.0,0.03310702812747917,0.0,0.07202669256521232,0.0531498528618139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353009458413092,0.0,0.0,0.06735694315863412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712601745597996,0.0,0.0,0.21935358805503705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930100818793756,0.051653164719293806,0.0,0.06709728583322001,0.0,0.0,0.1790340317463649,0.21670793452183773,0.0,0.0,0.05607845479094055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691938308887264,0.0642449412055269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385977648125345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13469975590895922,0.04658257921958195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608030544369904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743483881654581,0.2110871246863032,0.0,0.12098335382923525,0.08786242271340948,0.055330265331664616,0.06620579993319946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811899922260073,0.0,0.06256799734566419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060277230685815725,0.0,0.0,0.12826306945977958,0.0,0.2307504379905585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048783581212721146,0.0,0.0,0.4036681052109928,0.13508315647644614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624571922782596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586334370981563,0.047644653381677164,0.2546629406888353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04060348835993141,0.0,0.10061381275896814,0.03695023809691299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040388943263197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228502093455021,0.03737593415866346,0.0,0.050829777799853884,0.0,0.11395041472078715,0.0,0.0,0.07074781740224778,0.0,0.06108423894128893,0.0,0.092264937136956,0.0,0.06457713951690901,0.045014623549838935,0.06928267476746575,0.0,0.08161349241676802
mentalhealth,ImSoFuckingSick,2020/03/16,"Hi, I need an advice I am using the Google translator because I am not very good with English. I decided to use Reddit because I have seen that many people ask questions like these anonymously in this app. I have a schizoaffective disorder and lately I have not been able to have an appointment with my psychiatrist or psychologist. I have taken my medication as it should be, and I have tried to avoid stressful situations; But despite that my hallucinations do not leave me alone, I can not sleep without having nightmares and I do not stop feeling miserable and wanting to cry for no reason.What am I supposed to do in situations like this? I'm desperate. Any advice? Thanks.",7.021209677419352,8.133232733870972,7.488870967741934,68.97830645161292,64.40322580645162,10.716129032258065,35.66129032258064,10.686352973137794,4.142809677419357,545,25,90,14,8,179,81,124,0.156,0.726,0.11800000000000001,-0.7049,0,2,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,3,4,0,17,2,1,2,0,24,27,7,0,3,8,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,3,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,3,2,16,4,12,22,0,4,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,2,4,67,22,0,0.16844314743922725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292013883797702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17445630095171805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11454711642032245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747160470219432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205362758492366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18502688798113187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930504401952693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516991649556213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412821203410234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19001120717852255,0.17835697186766422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164585626893568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17077491330596795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16968874992713678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489845949081567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167772694641674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18869487515720146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17318760973411565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3786743104258224,0.16856479506582525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082601364405567,0.192951056281646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550798191114617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436184021264552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29096159368842234,0.0,0.13898323743084673,0.09935213257112002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16237318322368124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The-confused-alpaca,2020/03/16,"Need some advice - Experiences with counselling? First time posting on this sub, so apologies if this is the wrong one! 

Ok so a bit of backstory:  

Over the past 18 months or so, I go through phases of having really low moods where I believe I have no future and that nobody likes me and I convince myself I am useless so then I make myself feel awful. With that I have an overwhelming urge to run away and start a new life. 

Then a few days later I feel perfectly fine and content again. 

Anyway, I was referred to councelling but I chickened out when it actually came to making the appointment but now I'm willing to consider going for it.
 
What was your first appointment like and what could I expect if I pluck up the courage to go? (Atmosphere wise)

How would I know if I've made the right decision in going?

What would be a red flag?

Sorry it's a long post! Apologies if it's not in the right sub! 

Thanks in advance",1.6414575111812688,4.188365563535911,2.961483820047357,89.18169429097607,83.97237569060773,5.878558274138385,22.43120231518021,7.2636822038024595,0.9680937121810044,721,25,142,11,21,233,118,181,0.06,0.815,0.125,0.9265,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,4,10,14,0,1,12,2,12,1,0,4,1,33,27,20,0,9,8,0,2,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,11,9,0,0,5,0,0,7,2,4,0,3,4,3,17,9,19,18,3,37,0,3,1,0,3,12,0,6,18,102,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.15524445199323655,0.0,0.0,0.1554564617010448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14946601815044042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17923482608770025,0.0,0.0,0.17368010991098287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18195137529486252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270167878611618,0.0,0.0,0.10259695519597857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561609735255005,0.0,0.0,0.16087676819272087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706360069988893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616477121105272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742920352105182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236675887965904,0.15544223145381295,0.0,0.0,0.14078561816145707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15053050042577246,0.21238154795433573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698048936305162,0.0,0.0,0.11795984628081015,0.0,0.15364572006767882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078004188790848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186506403923591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047197738878568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019142136376135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717162121482757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17808313807115148,0.11260150114901503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14646450963623808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927640059106498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260194802583313,0.17393496720584756,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheBronzeSilverfish,2020/03/16,"I don't know how I'm gonna make it through the COVID-19 lockdown It's the fifth day of school lockdown in my country. It's supposed to last two weeks, but there are more and more cases of the virus being confirmed, so they'll probably extend it.
I don't have any close friends, but meeting people at school and talking to acquaintances daily kept me feeling okay. Now I'm alone. The only human contact I have is with my family. I feel like I'm already going crazy, and it's not even the worst part.
When we go back to school in April (hopefully), we'll have two weeks at most before our final exams, and then the year will end. College/university starts in October. That five-month break scares me. I don't want to be alone again.",3.771410018552878,5.1045959863945605,4.231341991341991,88.52805194805197,72.12925170068027,6.978107606679036,26.28880643166357,7.348242739294969,1.1784476190476183,578,19,119,6,11,182,99,147,0.085,0.7909999999999999,0.124,0.7816,0,4,0,0,0,0,21.0,3,0,1,0,8,6,0,1,6,1,13,0,0,2,0,19,27,10,0,2,3,0,2,1,1,4,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,1,3,0,0,2,4,2,0,2,1,2,13,4,13,20,5,23,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,2,15,72,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3290713807315546,0.1753109042086443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803329416484003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12215697907967844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13518197164537266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245444713557536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070677589493488,0.0,0.0,0.104928490821097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14976329326396692,0.0,0.1606533089667108,0.11349281632784065,0.0,0.17402827271783422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273830324679964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18057269015124774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577882743497187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730776359924729,0.12949575464323432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761316042322851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604327407131492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680411236225647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082359582558502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17203475072042196,0.0,0.11013662759956604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17128277899524635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15905105871521855,0.4823380057005774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244509668753186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768925142682647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31037502629666064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370238640119738,0.0,0.2548630067609917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023035166094248
mentalhealth,lemonwaffers,2020/03/16,"Feeling hopeless and depressed during this pandemic. ​

Hi, everyone. This may not entirely be a post about Narcissism but more on mental health.

I know at this moment, I am not alone in my feelings of worry and uncertainty. But I already feel like these next few months are going to be very hard for me. During these times, I know that sacrifice is becoming important as we begin to understand how important social distancing is.

I have seen my favorite sports league being postponed and my favorite late-night show going off air- and everyone knows that it could be months until life gets back to normal. I know that there are more important things in life and at this moment, a sports game and a comedy show have become second to whatever we as people are facing. I fully understand that, I support all the suspensions and urge everyone to stay home and social distance- it's a no-brainer. I would give up everything if it meant it would save someone's life.

But, that doesn't mean it's easy for me. I have just lost the presence of two of the best things in my life and how I would cope through the hardships in my day to day life. For more background info:

I had to push off going to college and cannot drive- I failed my tests so many times and have no job. Due to this, I am home all day with very little outside contact. Although the new norm has become staying at home, not going outside and postponing everything- even though it looks like this should be easy for me because this was my life pre-pandemic but for some reason, it seems hard.

I feel hopeless. I feel like this is just an extension of everything that I have been through. I was making progress, I was going therapy and we were discussing my new dreams and plans. I honestly don't mean to sound selfish- I know all the other sacrifices people are having to make. It just feels like this pandemic confirms all the hopelessness and grief I feel. My friend shares stories of what's it's like for her and she talks about playing Nintendo Switch with her boyfriend to ward off the boredom, my brothers are downloading games and playing to their hearts' content. I see people online homeschooling their kids, people playing around with marbles to fill the absence of sports. Others are binging on Netflix or devouring the pages of books.

Me? I'm afraid I don't know how to cope. I had such a hard time pre-pandemic being isolated so I don't think I know how to cook during it. For me, it's not just about being bored at home, for me it's the revival of a few years of a harsh reality. I've just worked hard to recover from the trauma that I've suffered through last year...I don't know how I am going to cope now. My dreams feel null and void..I can't even being to think of what my future my look like after this. I honestly don't even want to go to therapy.",4.1548112270243385,5.979202712204008,4.558103576751119,84.60663375558869,71.96903460837886,7.8324391455539,27.595669812882925,8.507472789574589,1.9973566484517304,2255,83,428,39,44,711,243,549,0.125,0.7240000000000001,0.151,0.9571,1,1,0,0,0,3,63.0,3,0,2,6,25,28,0,1,20,0,48,10,2,8,4,87,92,36,1,8,15,1,12,6,1,5,7,1,4,1,37,25,1,0,26,16,0,10,13,12,0,2,10,17,56,16,68,68,12,52,2,8,4,0,21,17,0,5,28,292,93,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699511316023771,0.07138253007339386,0.0,0.0,0.07008717597025863,0.0786004827563402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05758419013950194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04973948581345648,0.0,0.039431941320085456,0.21432157610594108,0.0,0.0,0.06788389063889479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722108885767962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05164644997184732,0.0,0.0,0.12515121669392773,0.0,0.05571389500734493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817333614363044,0.0,0.0,0.18543052879614952,0.17440662336034862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26165719036068963,0.1386349196795161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04997618751794676,0.0,0.033795727570517686,0.062052636390090364,0.2573375250198399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23178354353321035,0.0,0.0,0.06875811662124477,0.0,0.07665313613908052,0.0,0.0,0.2595410398374711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419080234467116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28439755479655915,0.05272766484163575,0.07296854431277637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27413750364969397,0.18961366207119493,0.0648322934662001,0.0,0.0,0.10863977591748727,0.0,0.07061233167136853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635671847847944,0.06558137814139202,0.0,0.14092387785878388,0.0,0.0,0.06518820113857568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326338119112237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494814470568442,0.06879421828146412,0.060703361489779416,0.06337847532406443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793803110490271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06195123818882201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665079074174529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051546309706372084,0.05888763942416366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13187831502459427,0.05480817688669305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13789318503808548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340482453959328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199209867274847,0.0,0.0,0.14794799222141733,0.0,0.08594891255914623,0.0828962615273805,0.06355359583863583,0.0,0.1131566544342787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06318875243003665,0.13468066465445225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067453301286343,0.03815343629322535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04709212599489412,0.06569169982093401,0.0,0.1378530819790258,0.0,0.0786004827563402,0.08331123365030398
mentalhealth,OnAvance,2020/03/16,"Struggling with people’s ignorance Ever since a certain Youtuber’s video claiming to have DID, I’ve seen an increase in people commenting about the disorder itself being fake and that all the medical research is inconclusive, and that everyone who claims to have it is faking. I commented on a commentary video on the topic expressing my support for the woman that was called “crazy” in the original video, and received a reply saying that the she is faking it. This comment went on to say that any mental health professional that can’t find a cure for mental illnesses knows nothing about mental illness. I tried explaining that there is really no “cure” for mental illnesses in the technical sense and I was berated and told I’m uneducated and not using logic. This person was so condescending and kept calling me “hun” and “buttercup”.

I’m struggling with this rise in ignorance regarding mental health. I knew that people like this existed, I suppose, but never had a direct conversation with someone about it. And frankly it makes me feel like shit. It makes me feel like the fact that I struggle every single day and probably for most of my life means that I’m a failure, uneducated, and simply doing something wrong. This person truly believes mental illnesses are simply to be cured, and that a mental health professional’s role is to cure, otherwise they don’t know what they’re doing. And they treated me as if I was stupid and uneducated for disagreeing with them. I know it was just one person, but it has caused me to doubt myself, and it is difficult to see this attitude in action, even going so far as to claim that someone with a disorder stemming from severe childhood abuse is faking it. 

Thanks for reading, I needed to get this out.",11.699542815674894,9.079180657232703,11.130503144654089,58.831066763425284,56.893081761006286,14.06134494436381,42.70053217223028,12.367839424501927,5.3768874697629405,1411,58,221,34,13,463,168,318,0.209,0.722,0.069,-0.9939,0,0,1,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,3,0,9,21,2,4,17,0,24,10,1,5,5,52,48,22,0,2,5,0,2,3,0,0,9,2,0,4,31,21,0,3,10,4,0,6,5,14,0,1,12,6,21,7,36,34,4,21,0,0,2,0,22,10,1,3,8,160,52,4,0.0,0.10283089938787747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05901956857115734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778160291778634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17724276275838266,0.0,0.0,0.08915631957426619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05597179383340575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989356702963737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057323386340831166,0.07850571563379677,0.07312356544178784,0.08293071056256912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776635997303481,0.12400431010414838,0.0,0.0,0.07932367105855255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04534372607786423,0.0,0.04932424930132507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767582854251132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309106966629534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613017126066409,0.12720232070217974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586480508522536,0.0,0.0,0.09453878011837118,0.0,0.08743089416000181,0.612241044622585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435302279719632,0.06693710934085585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327648843841683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05881054470992155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805059161175926,0.2273427006514201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357333586943757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681259290286236,0.0,0.05559932401036556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380363619574655,0.0,0.0,0.06915968128733165,0.0,0.0,0.09804698685099007,0.08908777066834607,0.0717928457821645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470722566568062,0.06681449434511051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721924542666307,0.0,0.0,0.0984872496019478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990374881604395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293071056256912,0.0,0.05892410635276792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495792241183122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804543712636334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489026361717492,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,columnphysics79,2020/03/16,"Why do I stress for no reason Whenever I try to read a book, which I regard as benefitial, my stress levels instantly activate for no damn reason. I fucking hate my circumstances. No one is there to speak to: only to argue, debate and fight until one gets the advantage over the other. I hate this life which I call hell. My mind is so messed up.",4.071470588235297,5.370127911764707,5.505176470588236,79.81629411764708,71.3529411764706,8.969411764705884,23.894117647058824,9.3871,1.9408317647058841,270,7,52,6,5,91,48,68,0.41600000000000004,0.561,0.023,-0.9856,0,0,0,0,1,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,11,7,2,3,0,3,2,0,2,0,4,7,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,10,0,2,0,1,9,1,10,7,0,4,1,0,0,1,4,3,3,0,1,37,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189205237710217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19820405097609012,0.11201215900959313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4233399174294133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514330156340532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21647709911057256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29055821633080936,0.16305650583174386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144522914498101,0.0,0.0,0.44086604056649503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4911758314385663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455596383709298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934574847704531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ehinnn,2020/03/16,"I don't feel anything So i don't know if this belongs here but...
So i've noticed lately that I dont feel anything very strongly. I'm a very bubbly person, always talking and joking with anyone that is near me. I just don't feel anything like sadness, happiness (other than having fun with friends, but that also doesn't last long) or nervousness
I have not had crushes in years, altought I know I'm not asexual or anything. I don't have any suicidal thougths, altought i have cut myself for hurting other people. My family is loving and caring so its nothing about childhood trauma either. I just wanted to share this as I said before I'm not sure if this belongs here. Thank you reading this far <3",2.7154118873826896,5.210105781021904,3.902340980187695,84.5141788321168,78.78102189781022,5.374139728884256,26.5740354535975,6.5431188927421005,1.3295655891553708,560,23,97,5,14,182,85,137,0.1,0.6559999999999999,0.243,0.9698,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,1,0,1,9,16,1,1,1,0,13,1,0,0,1,23,26,13,1,3,12,0,3,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,10,4,0,0,5,2,0,0,9,5,0,0,2,4,14,11,9,24,1,8,0,2,0,1,7,3,0,4,6,67,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12686904859731646,0.13200607651998436,0.0,0.0,0.1078846349241872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109288842179,0.0,0.5222081491520819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499595446048432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16175004234399912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859317834937952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14955721144792675,0.0,0.2406483629128801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256940917483095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688814835155877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16983368994713596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17437524745991773,0.1293175619786317,0.1789594566722948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750636081499311,0.0,0.0,0.1403966067230062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431840957714547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522249953778461,0.1806193797254241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099850740664299,0.13852345844066027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586888064228311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509085562806117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17353283754073082,0.0,0.149521859310008,0.0,0.0,0.12751354460141318,0.0,0.14605980658261894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617989225636819,0.0935734472096505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216274183056756
mentalhealth,Radical_Racial,2020/03/16,"My Girlfriend has some mental health issues, and refuses to get help. I need advice on how to convince her of the problem. Me and my partner have been together for a little over 6 months. I love her dearly and she is like a best friend to me. I've noticed that over the course of our relationship that she has had violent and ""strange"" episodes. She sometimes forgets where she is, how she got there, and what she did that day. She forgets a lot of the time we have spent together and on one occasion she put her hands around my neck and attempted to strangle me, but she stopped after a few seconds. That was at the start of our relationship and since then she has not put her hands on me, although what made the occasion worse was that she had acted like nothing happend then she started to cry. I'm really at a loss in our relationship because there are sometimes when she gets really depressive and there are sometimes when she is really at ease and to be honest its quite jarring. This is not at all the stable relationship I want nor need. I've gotten her doctors and I've asked her numerous times to go but she has refused each time. I really dont know what to do and I'm not sure who to ask for help. If anyone has any advice on how to either get her to go or what my next step should be, then please give me some advice.",4.533287385129492,5.384882687969931,5.167318295739348,84.33630743525481,69.86466165413535,8.467502088554722,28.311612364243945,8.680891452615391,1.9447918128654973,1049,36,215,17,18,338,133,266,0.094,0.7809999999999999,0.125,0.7083,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,4,0,0,4,10,13,1,0,11,0,24,6,3,4,2,43,45,26,0,6,8,0,2,2,3,1,2,0,0,1,12,15,0,3,1,0,1,6,5,4,0,2,10,2,39,9,30,32,8,35,0,2,0,1,42,14,0,5,17,159,51,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053117265804863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082306681882294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282152629633132,0.0,0.0,0.09271230233905503,0.19472549515724225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348662812878207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092951342654586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439983877622678,0.0671657585882442,0.0,0.08970107013563719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065981684006071,0.0,0.0,0.12205870776109674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08046318608792477,0.0,0.16323645629272054,0.09990663708209382,0.11837750388989415,0.0,0.08329532356903102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107026647593656,0.0,0.0,0.13961416181081526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870169677707543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057236092104686616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176125960367684,0.10438196974918286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885414743176458,0.09399611714254386,0.09854576319981584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049549919562528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312859653275684,0.0,0.0,0.15444634869074236,0.0,0.0,0.11076078953335464,0.0,0.0,0.09993119990364033,0.11857127206350825,0.0,0.0,0.0705722396567575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432138140007175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965396000237696,0.0,0.2093916277729276,0.0,0.11077242764269052,0.0,0.0,0.2668751896903465,0.0,0.0,0.4472566747020112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615090955491174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090101112744225,0.0,0.14743059827461785,0.0,0.0,0.08707098428862703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815667115367144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18218566471407452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06142819604342844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613399438603807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoughVisit,2020/03/16,"Rest of the school year is cancelled, what do I do about therapy? I can't afford to go to another person near me house, that and I don't know if I'd want to start over with someone new.

Does anyone have any advice?

​",0.2243262411347509,2.565365085106386,2.026702127659576,94.4841666666667,89.63829787234043,4.835460992907802,18.471631205673766,6.42735559955562,-0.0059049645390074615,177,5,38,2,6,58,39,47,0.055,0.914,0.03,-0.264,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,5,10,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,8,10,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,3,24,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24534427522987706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720359886758423,0.3050794919471856,0.17073730700914236,0.2632704784260877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17555511008775734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197144611944064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426897840807221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897029328265268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798239286475225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424865291522577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192260489028055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25409787725816085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21273216363031855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777097805193104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871222715096832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14808854287141887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050794919471856,0.16168188759297294
mentalhealth,bsmith128,2020/03/16,"I think I have Separation Anxiety Disorder I get scared in school frequently about if something happens to my mum. I also feel safe only when around her and my Teddy bear, Bessie. I am 13, Male, and I live in Wales. Any tips on who I should see, what I should do, etc? BTW I am also being tested (not diagnosed yet) for Aspergers.",2.3918974358974374,4.444710984615387,4.247307692307693,83.90685897435898,77.61538461538461,8.025641025641027,23.14102564102564,8.841846274778883,1.7531025641025637,254,8,51,6,6,86,51,65,0.11699999999999999,0.836,0.047,-0.5267,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,10,12,6,0,3,2,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,12,1,7,9,1,7,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,1,3,37,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42266420462612136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17970881753966106,0.0,0.20216150164690425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352512955609965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26822274884101593,0.0,0.0,0.3028698357250644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947246013236077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336199937779809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13806721386773232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336880887453229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333502593887174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200984943619098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26457471200064137,0.2674496269228195,0.21058446963368704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20344360462062125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16932992262490584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,happygal4444,2020/03/16,"Tips for healing from PTSD and depression? For some context, I (17F) developed PTSD at 13 after a number of events. This may have caused my anorexic behaviour (not sure if I actually was anorexic though) when I was 15 that lasted four months. I went from a healthy 136lbs for my height to 102lbs. I always had mild to severe depression but this really increased at 16, along with what I have been told by psychiatrists and counsellors is a bit of anxiety. The PTSD and depression I am sure of as I am on antidepressants, whereas the anorexia and anxiety are somewhat unconfirmed as I have recovered from my damaging eating habits and am not convinced that I am anxious enough to officially have anxiety.

My question is, having suffered from these various conditions, how can I move forward? I am going to counselling, keeping in touch with friends, keeping up hobbies and going on daily walks, meditating and praying. Although I'd love to hear how survivors of these conditions have ploughed through? What advice would you give to a younger person going through this? Thanks!",7.395579975579977,9.07452126455027,6.8747089947090005,71.66893772893773,63.86772486772489,10.25982905982906,38.87708587708588,10.389873798559362,4.526836060236059,865,46,135,21,13,269,117,189,0.161,0.706,0.133,-0.6056,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,0,4,11,0,0,6,0,21,3,0,3,2,26,32,16,0,2,4,0,1,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,9,10,1,2,1,0,0,8,2,5,0,1,6,2,17,6,32,24,6,20,1,5,0,1,8,8,0,5,6,106,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.13048988303485762,0.0,0.0,0.13066808664612328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126443247840684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3068826623173063,0.1510637464839064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459858754163578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13736564569877027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3455144223384149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682732044870435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381668669361056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033105150200158,0.0,0.0,0.12827488734525602,0.22798576880149565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071037103329782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23771014085936584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10899835463911693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068608942810995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067327623754018,0.14212151224572586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675776142027006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4689290109536186,0.0,0.14979522667308276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856634401192067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510637464839064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520560455673515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310995005491812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313776629140748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277736750359673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395830952523428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094989724798004,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Polaroid_Girl,2020/03/16,"FaceTiming a Psychiatrist?? So, some backstory, I’ve been dealing with on/off depressive episodes and general bad mental health for a few years now, and my therapist finally nudged me to go see a psychiatrist. So, I made an appointment one and a half months ago(before the Corona Virus was on people’s minds), but today(the day before my appointment) I just found out the psychiatrist is only seeing people via FaceTime now. 

I know I’m going to sound picky, but I really hate this idea. I’m socially awkward and FaceTime is even worse than face-to-face, and I don’t think I’m going to get the same things across as I would in person. Also, if I’m FaceTiming the Psychiatrist from my house, I’m scared my family is going to overhear me and I’m not going to want to be as honest as I could. But, on the other hand, I’ve waited so long already and I don’t know when they’re going to start seeing patients in person again. 

I guess what I want to know is, would it be stupid of me to cancel in the face of the looming crisis? Or is that more of a reason to go now?",3.6132943925233647,4.901996252336449,5.175782710280377,81.77713200934579,72.45794392523366,8.340654205607477,25.05724299065421,8.841846274778883,1.7866738317757007,834,25,166,16,16,282,119,214,0.174,0.7859999999999999,0.04,-0.9795,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,0,11,7,2,2,13,0,14,3,2,2,0,35,43,20,0,6,7,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,2,6,9,0,1,7,0,0,7,3,6,0,2,4,5,17,1,27,34,4,25,0,1,3,0,5,7,0,4,11,107,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943626224632676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623672503946796,0.09872768896563833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030805723020757,0.0,0.0,0.21010386301385225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856954071037834,0.0,0.0,0.07961888284409313,0.127277676865645,0.10633243998481548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815414991858519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638329456749337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523997292910014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536309115611242,0.0,0.0,0.06450064518306417,0.0,0.4911400815075968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360006617349121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188720424362015,0.0,0.13122791555201074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245160572644502,0.0,0.13936675505617638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20354450575063013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925464227587177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681701718114985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441457349861933,0.0,0.12465532923791088,0.0,0.09854137178603813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365695555860356,0.0938938229602628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17117764030466395,0.21559396985441429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908905113471709,0.1269332914715379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360095597723272,0.0,0.2951352557150567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258478070488751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738276599853567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14334188834946374,0.0820186560753895,0.07910559612340606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702181754729953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456350511601828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12581217338140255,0.17539914790645034,0.0,0.0,0.07950159247539614
mentalhealth,Hei08,2020/03/16,"I need help to move on Hi, I'm a female  in my late 20's and I can move on from my past relationship. I was with this guy for 7 years we spoke about marriage, dreams, life goals but he always said like he doesn't like to plan for the future so he broke up with me because I wasn't his crush . He told me like I wasn't wife material,i wasn't feminine enough , other people told me like he only was with me because was easy, we had the same hobbies so for him I was the meanwhile plate. he began to go out with her crush after 1 week and she only use him because she kick him for other guy, so I began to compare my self with her all the time, I felt lost, I felt like I don't know me.
he want a girl thin, with straight hair, cute,feminine , strong, but her crush was manipulative, selfcaring, only wanting the best for her. 

 So for almost a year I was so depressed, I felt ugly , I felt betrayed, I felt like I wasn't enough. I'm still struggling with this in my mind I felt like I wasn't enough, and when I saw me in the mirror I only see an ugly person.

A few friends told me like his crush only use him as a carpet, if she said come here he comes, they told me like that girl ask him to travel two hour to other state  in the night to saw her knowing he needed to work the next day really early, when in our relationship when I ask him if he can gave me a hand to take care of my cat only once a week, when I was far. He always told me like ohh you live really far away, it's exhausting for me to do that. I know this is not my fault, I know he is an asshole , but one part of me still caring for him  and wanted to help him. In my stupid mind, I though if I help him to overpass the obsession with his crush, he will realize the way I feel, but he told me to my face.(I'm not really care about you, I'm not feel guilt).I'm still ""friend"" with this guy but day by day is hard because I'm still loving him but he not and I'm struggling moving on.",3.3469376941348443,3.1958434133016667,4.683194774346795,90.32664854741462,72.11163895486936,7.712077471222365,23.318198428649737,7.1686216300943375,0.5423538461538464,1491,30,362,13,26,498,170,421,0.10099999999999999,0.69,0.209,0.9928,0,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,3,2,1,6,17,27,1,3,19,0,22,5,2,3,1,58,72,25,0,8,13,1,12,10,2,1,2,3,1,7,10,19,0,0,13,2,0,7,11,9,0,2,34,18,74,18,50,37,8,51,0,3,3,1,72,16,0,4,36,218,84,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383643321752214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060902418749195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11919532029456713,0.0,0.05989523936509671,0.0,0.0,0.15544567429388942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06690170963432025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194992172723452,0.0,0.0,0.10982998943056717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334046090813988,0.0,0.05490779611035977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19761242661974635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446784799931997,0.0,0.3672600811572845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850620977932943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036230603703005966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893676183734811,0.0,0.0,0.057107493329897376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819087753193004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627809251471455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401413682439155,0.0,0.07191279577684316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04502852222237684,0.31145038101570177,0.0,0.05629243284455511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695906740998357,0.0,0.057536879185768365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287386878894606,0.0,0.0,0.2032685370417613,0.0,0.0945396594608929,0.0,0.0,0.06779886616206315,0.05982507228142751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789168738371015,0.04319866128983012,0.29090856306093665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903505586892822,0.060856604560579675,0.04419623481716017,0.05566405577206587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225196796449042,0.0,0.0,0.13688732066630593,0.0,0.0,0.1212817292875246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05080050969737103,0.0,0.06650517095025933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036433832644522,0.0,0.0,0.13329071847584367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04793207889355039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263406789146554,0.0,0.03717314749691981,0.0,0.0,0.3654952383577887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06227450323548641,0.0,0.0,0.1101190923236522,0.0,0.0,0.1128042349554903,0.05060179606688151,0.10227283637165456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04641077153536178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210584146684366
mentalhealth,Logical_Button,2020/03/16,"I may have mental issues I believe I have mental issues, after dealing with lots of maybe mental scarring events, I've been a very on edge person. People walking behind me fills me with anxiety as if im going to be attacked, Im constantly stressed out to the point of hitting myself in the face, and my anxiety goes through the roof by the thought of being alone without any familiar faces. Usually when i become upset I become filled with pretty dark thoughts. I try to play it off as teenage problems but i feel like its more than that",6.710705128205127,6.803159942307693,6.82769230769231,76.98397435897436,64.96153846153845,8.856410256410255,34.641025641025635,8.344100000000001,2.8400564102564108,430,18,75,5,6,138,77,104,0.114,0.8170000000000001,0.069,-0.128,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,2,5,0,6,2,2,0,0,14,11,6,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,3,1,0,4,1,4,0,0,3,1,11,2,21,4,2,14,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,3,6,52,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274121285723885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028910045605946,0.0,0.22563829003593194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16777584808002305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3257524908082943,0.0,0.16615555205140484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936974149417302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15204183110886452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745685668761384,0.10535726551461827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838143129958042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31859992811781424,0.3078543722402846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204958529285209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125379275583841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816000081836486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4458649789309061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224165980138464,0.12877082124659026,0.0,0.0,0.1394129934672522,0.0,0.0,0.150036654073754,0.0,0.14111512610840954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689338716788476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341597897653385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012688612204122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242456711650738,0.12168358572435994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421621162765546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon7492794,2020/03/16,"Sometimes you just have to take care of yourself I moved across the country with my friends and signed a year lease.  My female roomate immediately lost her shit and started threatening me with her suicide.  I tried to remain strong and help her but I got roofied at her bday party downtown and she left me alone (I found my way back to the group).  A homeless man almost stabbed me a few weeks later.  I just became a nervous wreck.  My relationship deteriorated with my roommates, and I tried to be reasonable and move out.  I offered to move into the basement to be away from them, even offered 1.5x rent.  I offered to pay half my rent and just move out and find a different place to live.  They told me I had agreed to live there for a year and they would do nothing to help me.

For 2mo I have just stayed in my room while they have used my furniture, television, and kitchen ware (besides some baking dishes and some cups it’s all mine) while I recovered.  I realized in the last week that even though she doesn’t speak to me and ignores me when I’m around, she still sleeps with my duvet and uses my yoga mat to work out.

I contacted a friend from my home town and finally opened up about what was happening.  He also deals with chronic depression and he told me that I just had to take care of myself.  I can’t help them, and I need to help myself.

Well, I’m quitting my job and going to go road trip for 5mo until my lease is up.  It’s the only way I feel I can be happy, recover, and reconnect with people that really love and care for me.  I’m selling my furniture and television and keeping my kitchen ware at a friends house.  I’m leaving nothing useful behind and just using the room as a storage shed.  I’m thinking about removing the shower head so they can’t use the shower in my room, (but your own!).  One of my roomates complained that I was doing ‘everything in my power to inconvenience them.’  I told him I was planning to be homeless for 5mo because they were forcing me to live there (like I’m not being inconvenienced?!), and he responded that this was my fault and I ‘don’t want to take responsibility for myself.’  I’m so excited to leave and have this be over with.

Thankfully I found a couple of great friends who are helping me escape!  I’ve built a sleeping rig in my car, and I’m planning to visit so many people in so many states.  My friends have all been so supportive, and I think this will be a great chance to reflect and reassert that I’m not crazy, and that despite all the gaslighting and entrapment, I am loved and free.

Long story short, I hope they enjoy living in quarantine without a TV and pans.",4.509431599229288,5.530352809248555,5.151960500963393,83.80323940269753,70.04046242774568,8.078805394990367,29.060211946050096,8.344100000000001,1.9447922928709047,2064,76,414,30,36,665,249,519,0.08199999999999999,0.716,0.20199999999999999,0.9975,7,2,0,0,0,1,54.0,0,2,8,7,24,29,1,1,22,0,32,11,4,6,3,83,74,46,1,4,11,0,1,1,5,2,1,1,11,1,14,45,4,2,9,2,5,10,7,7,1,2,15,2,79,23,66,50,7,57,0,2,0,2,49,28,1,4,16,281,93,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343911969626983,0.07595781528642265,0.0,0.05864973482269231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652878855144695,0.0,0.0,0.06890506613960859,0.056393705415852764,0.0,0.044707202867354336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22432414830693687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114898757514796,0.0,0.0,0.07561001452810756,0.06316737962264883,0.0,0.0,0.07662438115994187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688036566842928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591299701839845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0370827579734158,0.0,0.0,0.0803400609577768,0.06703116083043449,0.0,0.0,0.16082640005579493,0.2833103670657605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336128783845766,0.0,0.05865646102906411,0.16171456522871697,0.0,0.0,0.06485405807316354,0.07807147869525058,0.0,0.0,0.07526769484864006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457902884120101,0.0,0.0735657029045861,0.07284287421637849,0.0,0.08462417168329085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277833975624405,0.06518769870527961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059781647311291125,0.0,0.15531231431897788,0.07968380302692052,0.0,0.0,0.035830074861674395,0.0,0.2590412092466829,0.06490333020818682,0.0,0.0,0.08005895046716259,0.0,0.1323838925359518,0.0,0.0,0.14870989754665906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117939953699896,0.0,0.05438046126054062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074284801541548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049696881502954274,0.05577814973492251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168903290075952,0.0,0.07662438115994187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800580280756675,0.0,0.0,0.04698329237752071,0.07540543046204866,0.0,0.07873939551932192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528215227566573,0.0,0.0,0.14678533819133516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253484258546425,0.0,0.05191021999584345,0.07817036634692827,0.05856918238191299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022173270249056,0.08322502702808939,0.0,0.0,0.1654269905945317,0.0,0.0,0.06752134597867179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398624204084276,0.0720558868518214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21023769033830264,0.0,0.0995856897950806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167097844597898,0.0,0.0,0.0432576576081243,0.1164272867670783,0.11765737359388286,0.0,0.06594120167499573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069685755968322,0.0,0.0533921780116957,0.0,0.0,0.05209842153005262,0.0,0.0,0.09445672972830507
mentalhealth,Fake_Barista,2020/03/16,"Advice for helping my mental state until I can get health care Hello, I apologize in advance if this is not the kind of post for this sub and if it gets too long.

I am a college student from the US. I am struggling with my mental health. I believe that I have ADHD, but I can't get tested/medicated until I finish up the semester in May. I understand that I do not have the ability to diagnose myself so it is possible that I am looking for the answers to my problems in a diagnosis that I do not fit.

I have believed that I have ADHD for a while now, but after taking some amphetamines I feel certain. I don't usually do stuff like that, I am scared of anything and everything. After taking the amphetamine I felt as though I actually had control over my thoughts and I could think about something that I wanted to do and I would actually be able to do it. Perhaps it was a placebo effect, but it was effective.

I don't want to go into too much detail because I often can't put my thoughts efficiently into words so I end up overexplaining. I don't even know if my self-prescribed ADHD is relevant to my main issue.

My issue which I need advice for is a sort of attention seeking behavior that I am pursuing. I don't know why I do it, but it happened first in high school where I took all of my medication at once knowing full well that it wouldn't hurt me. I ended up in the hospital after telling my counselor. I was very depressed at the time and I think that I just wanted my parents to pay attention to me (I have 5 siblings and at the time my sister had had my niece so she got most of the attention). It didn't really work or make me feel good.

Now to today's attention seeking behavior: I have decided to basically stop eating or to low restrict. I have dropped nearly 20lbs since January and I am 5 pounds above underweight currently. I have no intention of stopping my new habit until I am underweight. I tell myself that I can easily stop once I  drop below 100lbs (5'2F), and I honestly believe that. The thing is, I also know that my behavior will not get me what I want. I don't even know what I want. Attention? Sympathy? Control? I have no idea.

I don't do a lot of risk-taking behavior. I basically just like to follow all of the rules and I want everyone to like me. To me, I don't quite see this behavior as risk taking because I feel like I am not in danger because I am in control. It's strange how I feel that I control all things in my life even those things that I can't control, yet I cannot even control my thoughts or body enough to do basic things.

If anyone has advice on how to help with invasive thoughts, inability to act on my desires, and reducing the feelings of need for attention, I would greatly appreciate it.

Thank you to anyone who has read through this. I am usually reclusive even on the internet, but these are unusual times for me. I also apologize if my post seems poorly written or disjointed, my brain is basically full of static apparently.",4.091508706322308,5.262505991624792,5.874232402321688,77.67568657239688,71.1608040201005,9.30558217443808,31.13665225351564,9.648456367147027,3.017882427642087,2355,103,453,56,43,812,248,597,0.10099999999999999,0.7879999999999999,0.11199999999999999,0.9076,3,0,1,0,0,0,57.0,1,1,0,12,24,20,1,3,20,0,63,8,2,12,4,104,108,38,0,19,21,2,6,4,0,5,5,0,0,0,41,14,1,10,30,1,2,6,20,8,1,1,15,8,96,12,70,86,11,65,0,3,2,0,13,28,0,16,30,357,137,6,0.061985989779081964,0.0,0.120978768875722,0.0,0.22348534203321088,0.181715975439698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09914034726282113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668409059916686,0.0,0.05100918803956765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133582521085158,0.0,0.0,0.2095109518054352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885246090344604,0.0,0.06919686459108262,0.0,0.0,0.06319884772943465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4171353498776042,0.049490768992703084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05338844216776272,0.06291447483093382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342714236331377,0.0,0.0,0.10980237705551753,0.06404809734131124,0.0,0.20470580822645454,0.0,0.0,0.05923026958514725,0.055709010733744915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15670989451452508,0.04428280348356254,0.05951627088918397,0.0,0.0,0.05272525124052956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295404851287587,0.0,0.0352280664591473,0.05199090732132832,0.049575858554262116,0.06833977256120513,0.0,0.0,0.05481400604976725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177641707921034,0.0,0.0,0.08309580468066317,0.06549160146859506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635728408324132,0.06997463749997608,0.0,0.12939453772725826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06454886969381374,0.17032939454452448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04378253772446728,0.12113289429110548,0.0,0.0,0.0548556503691436,0.0520526198439799,0.0,0.0,0.05269827187020439,0.0,0.0,0.04137612950663614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885246090344604,0.062444363445557274,0.12493459687385032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045566834687020163,0.0919236519991294,0.0,0.059866455187787986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320261122217271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882810610234756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987988990980815,0.11873088739637327,0.0,0.0,0.05931222082780616,0.0,0.062313040373234735,0.0,0.0659297301363511,0.06200276406823645,0.0,0.039709812294461085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205878931220809,0.06273313093048619,0.0493948085007776,0.05642971706391293,0.06466490598163309,0.0,0.0,0.05127545129080069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04771984329340097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546918901260834,0.0,0.06480121511837979,0.07095912827892586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981725018677976,0.0,0.10835697442002272,0.05706837130820741,0.0,0.0,0.16472294916523544,0.0794362387317353,0.0609009202378879,0.1968398079293749,0.10843358735492396,0.0,0.0587554704790246,0.0,0.06886871540490834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452960141336499,0.07456151357061587,0.0,0.13653762085397025,0.051144933265750134,0.21936565663991828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05573284902950136,0.0,0.05593271447166656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04512653880874688,0.0,0.0,0.08806613734826009,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coach_jess,2020/03/16,"Childhood Abuse Survivor turned Trauma Informed Life Coach for other Survivors of Domestic Abuse -- Free Resources Hello everyone! I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse, emotional abuse, and neglect. I have spent my ENTIRE life learning about psychology to try to understand what happened to me, why, and the effect it has had on me and my life. I spent so much of my life trying to figure these things out and then trying to heal from the traumas. There was a long period of my life where I was just completely miserable, hopeless, angry, scared, worried, sad, hurt, depressed, anxious, and so on…  

I have since turned my life around completely. I started my first business while I was completing school for counselling. At the same time, I was still working through therapy. When I accomplished all I could through therapy, I was in a stable place. I was able to function and survive. However, I still wasn’t living the life I wanted and had no idea HOW to get it.  

This is when I hired my first Business Coach. Working with her, I learned a ton about coaching, an area I knew nothing about. After gaining some different skills through Coaching, I was able to finally pinpoint what it was that I needed after my completion of therapy left me stable, but aimless: a Coach.  

I needed a Coach who had a background in mental health work. I needed a Coach who understood what I was going through, what I had done in therapy, and what I should focus on or work towards next. Unfortunately for me, this type of Coach didn’t yet exist. Instead of this discouraging me, I decided to become this Coach instead.  

I have taken my experience previously working as a Probation Officer, my education and experience in psychology and counselling, and my experience and passion as a survivor of domestic abuse and created a Trauma Informed Life Coaching program. This program empowers survivors of any type of abuse at any point in their lives to break the negative conditioning the abuse as had on them and to create and live a life that is genuinely happy, healthy, and successful.  

I have also created a social media platform associated with my Life Coaching practice to provide as much free information, support, and resources as possible to any and all survivors that are interested (including a 3 day workshop about anxiety):

Instagram: [https://www.instagram.com/lifepluscoaching/](https://www.instagram.com/lifepluscoaching/) 

Facebook: LifePlus Coaching – [https://www.facebook.com/lifepluscoaches/?eid=ARC0AvvPKf7bqkk0rOelYUAP0OMDnJfksifhgacPokqmZsW\_QrzGpJwlMZbC0lThgiNmleAgBOlIsgk2](https://www.facebook.com/lifepluscoaches/?eid=ARC0AvvPKf7bqkk0rOelYUAP0OMDnJfksifhgacPokqmZsW_QrzGpJwlMZbC0lThgiNmleAgBOlIsgk2) 

Facebook Group: Better Than Okay – [https://www.facebook.com/groups/637665736992253/?ref=direct](https://www.facebook.com/groups/637665736992253/?ref=direct) 

Website: LifePlusHelp.com",13.731134751773048,15.783594813238775,10.284922931442082,51.46120000000002,50.040189125295505,11.590695035460994,42.924728132387706,11.288533730351634,5.4488939763593365,2398,110,286,51,25,691,206,423,0.156,0.718,0.126,-0.9231,3,0,0,0,7,1,125.0,0,0,2,14,19,20,0,2,21,1,28,13,0,2,2,50,45,33,0,6,3,0,0,0,0,1,12,0,0,0,21,22,0,2,12,12,4,1,4,11,0,2,22,0,47,11,58,21,7,41,0,7,0,1,11,19,0,2,20,222,68,15,0.12593249519028374,0.5222329495826857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035408545275629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845762270799072,0.0,0.04816900706408496,0.07113393715269598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0560533099793895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954127346200528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05568852910006725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26407565048205395,0.0,0.0,0.050273425094522484,0.0,0.0,0.04060802063117084,0.0,0.054232736788349285,0.0,0.0,0.06578632705427748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443633270405415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082855351930645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06016694793641834,0.0,0.18477921727103064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897644647461061,0.0,0.1071181160762104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032897265532431656,0.0,0.03578516956606439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055680844799157886,0.06702874141764496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693017675915487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740667034950787,0.07108122925691628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841301224887562,0.0,0.44474922809618095,0.0,0.0,0.1668010506649298,0.0557231476894421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06345516775641465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925748739434682,0.14006602424811435,0.0,0.0,0.06696531865393786,0.0,0.0,0.060417812776627285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578632705427748,0.0,0.05952345646725035,0.07098498331097237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06304019839344271,0.06372520417380596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052086330685950234,0.0,0.0,0.06418615989670927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044567834133339215,0.0,0.10056985333259633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145335158717417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28802956675174457,0.0,0.04183197702701021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03671612533387707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282498467121708,0.1369783923407028,0.0,0.06555008437053203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03713912423083612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05681724468131085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292008908682637,0.06394528088725966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meow2024,2020/03/16,"Struggling with relationships I’m having a hard time right now feeling secure in a lot of my friendships. I feel like everyone is moving on and there’s all this distance between me and friends I thought I would have for life. I know that I’m fortunate to have had my friends in my life for so long, but I can’t imagine life without them. My four closest friends all live in different cities from me and we’re all post college and moving on with our lives but I can’t help but feel abandoned or forgotten. Then I internalize a lot of those feelings and I hate myself. Can anyone relate? Any advice or encouragement?",2.920250000000003,5.396855858333336,3.6500000000000017,86.70500000000001,77.91666666666666,6.333333333333332,28.33333333333333,7.492282038375204,1.7420833333333334,493,22,94,7,12,156,79,120,0.114,0.6940000000000001,0.192,0.7789,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,1,0,3,9,1,1,3,0,9,3,0,0,3,27,18,12,0,1,6,0,5,1,3,1,3,0,0,0,3,7,0,2,7,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,2,5,17,6,15,15,5,14,0,1,0,0,8,7,0,4,5,67,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15698080857908092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924436889263944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232698666371703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784023312839014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535035473243609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32490852906518913,0.1147650933856123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723426721587614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14390670878771053,0.158604056742766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076772136577666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828650100472152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3404057536108378,0.07848321939773123,0.0,0.28370563188673936,0.14216610833322946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731499190058885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3414812366425312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385386998882455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724730209927027,0.0,0.13719027893838506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16794143368367673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12753448947403515,0.09367361443548522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15485641612548615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411787061578932,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HomeIsMyParentsAttic,2020/03/16,"Timberline Knolls Hi, 
I have decided to do residential treatment after withdrawing from school, and the only option my family is letting me consider is Timberline knolls. I know administration and policies have shuffled around a lot in the last couple of years, so I was wondering if anyone had a recent stay/experience there that they would be willing to share with me. I am an adult (not adolescent) seeking depression/sh/trauma treatment. l am queer, in college, and a bit concerned especially about the bathroom situation. if you have info about tk involving those situations in particular, that would be super helpful. 
Thank you,",7.8831074766355185,10.23232846728972,8.263633177570096,59.63881425233647,63.39252336448598,11.705140186915884,38.60864485981308,11.45678717892309,5.569150467289719,514,27,70,17,8,169,81,107,0.0,0.89,0.11,0.8859999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,1,1,5,3,0,0,7,0,16,1,0,0,0,16,19,6,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,10,3,12,11,2,8,0,0,0,1,8,4,1,5,4,57,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14923863249242844,0.0,0.0,0.19000229629905735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330156126028943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361616379535626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20878027008424332,0.20120741205713802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14306090276407996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11729822964922446,0.17397791605868915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21825162807079249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814547046467856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16232684592916016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21074119754947465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21600749589277474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4798195011313828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22749318639157365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19650216397814688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23146102561111334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30323603364585644,0.0,0.0,0.13744506662955014
mentalhealth,throwawaymental2245,2020/03/16,"Are these thoughts a reason to go back to therapy? So I(24f) have nagging feelings of almost paranoia I think?

I’ll explain the thoughts. I’ve been medicated for clinical depression. And occasionally I think that these “meds” are just a tool my mother and doctor are using to keep my mind sedated. Kind of an idea that everyone on earth is locked out of a big secret that a few people, including my doctors and mother, know. Then, when I began to discover this secret, they quickly put me on meds so that I wouldn’t get any farther in my discovery.

I have moments when I can dismiss the idea as untrue. But it’s always pestering me. Beyond that idea, I’m occasionally convinced my parents are trying to trap me with them forever instead of helping me live on my own. I know, logically, this isn’t true. But whenever my parents try to explain how they are helping I get insanely, illogically furious.

I feel blurry and my memory is a lot worse on the meds. I know I exhibited thoughts of suicide and self-harm prior to these “meds”. And I’ve stopped those habits. That’s why (unless I’m right about being one of the few Knowers) I don’t really want to get off the meds.

Unless I get overwhelmed I can generally fight off these thoughts. Since I usually know they probably are just intruding, false thoughts, should I not worry about them?",4.254981252343459,6.267815405511818,5.526355455568055,76.98431758530185,72.11023622047244,8.775103112110987,30.992875890513684,9.362217197678863,3.0568119985001867,1059,48,190,25,21,353,139,254,0.114,0.826,0.06,-0.9393,3,0,0,0,1,1,33.0,0,0,5,0,13,8,3,1,11,0,18,4,0,3,1,50,44,17,1,3,7,4,2,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,14,8,0,2,23,0,0,2,4,5,0,1,7,2,33,3,30,34,4,24,0,2,0,0,16,12,0,2,10,131,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621581583264427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995088900953913,0.0,0.0,0.06534148048368464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388387002530591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275835807318653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966952986648583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181387693793423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716749946058847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20080297191614724,0.0,0.054607642026545715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12880826034467666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32540672874855986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854052668267436,0.0,0.10005833199916264,0.21122445910386872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848453160421334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816885130225044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5336470200574733,0.09679610005178373,0.0,0.0,0.09701903176749424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511006692238258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21338330241659692,0.0,0.0,0.06661363386601257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035964926130301,0.0,0.0,0.09659253386027757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155487464042166,0.09879196591848917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205654922692973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023820187861447,0.0,0.0,0.07948297395443828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803318364501896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510201499420337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098822198201626,0.0,0.0,0.123135503154232,0.0,0.3814060367337536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047158555982796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298707942036343,0.10582467719873694,0.0,0.0566737569157746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670227907579835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757955740664738,0.09791940160642224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xrebxbiex,2020/03/16,"Being stuck inside brought back some depression... I haven't been able to go to work for 4 days now. At first I thought it would be great. I had a whole list of things to do from enjoyable things like video games, all the way to fully cleaning my apartment.

And it all came tumbling down when my depression came back hard. It's probably because I honestly use work to distract myself from it usually. And now that I can't go to work, I can't shake these thoughts.

I don't want to do anything at this point. Not even eat. Don't even have an appetite.

And I was doing so good. I was a few months in of having no depressive episodes after having one that literally lasted continuously over a year. And now I'm right back to square one after struggling for so long to be better....",3.0676674937965287,4.857740967741936,3.9051612903225816,88.30081885856079,74.80645161290323,7.091811414392061,25.471464019851126,7.882392219407189,1.3200223325062033,610,21,127,9,13,195,97,155,0.11599999999999999,0.7709999999999999,0.113,0.3894,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,5,11,12,0,3,5,0,19,1,0,1,2,15,30,7,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,10,6,1,0,2,2,0,6,7,6,0,3,10,2,12,6,22,16,5,32,0,3,1,0,1,8,0,1,18,93,22,3,0.14113384670797766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614113045758273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3255696493379534,0.0,0.08603388299617845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482141829280675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3228390442963191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910196554148201,0.0,0.3646751260923892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14441515928571788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864351493712197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004837791154678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041923502983482,0.1183763745686485,0.0,0.15560056424179328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642820513771144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150429219505942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895086855555789,0.0,0.0,0.12489901311340798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265168994686894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19127189420397456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13341710362975553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521661573363441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052753394637578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14754374002259496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875261130751331,0.0,0.0,0.22408901896495295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189432929097453,0.1554389929091619,0.0,0.08324439944024509,0.11202547827696488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15757089966922275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082413638982282,0.0,0.0,0.1002574353734642,0.0,0.0,0.09088557002501144
mentalhealth,Pass-The-Weed-Daddy,2020/03/16,"I’m scared that my problems could ruin my lovely relationship. Hey guys. Just venting here. I’ll take any advice I can get as well. I’ve been with my boyfriend for quite a long time now and he makes me so happy. He is literally the most perfect being on this earth. I want nothing but for him to be happy but I’m worried that my problems are bringing us down. Because of past abandonment, anxiety, etc., I am very clingy. I don’t really have anyone but him to be around so when he is not with me I am at a loss. Ever since we got together, he hasn’t been visiting his friends as much because I complain. I don’t mean to hurt his feelings or take away his firends. I just get scared because I miss him and I want to be able to talk to him. He’s also had drug problems in the past as well, and his friends are still doing a lot of drugs and every time he goes over there he gets wasted. It just worries me. Not totally sure what to do- as he makes me feel alive. Idk guys haha. I guess to sum it up I feel alone unless I’m with him. And when he’s with his friends I kinda feel let down so 👍👍 yay",0.6547382053654047,2.4959039021276648,2.5547826086956533,94.94434782608698,82.31914893617021,5.4486586493987055,21.281221091581873,6.498293943080001,0.17190101757631826,847,26,198,8,23,282,132,235,0.196,0.637,0.16699999999999998,-0.7288,0,1,2,0,0,0,24.0,2,0,0,3,17,23,0,2,5,2,22,3,0,2,4,43,44,20,0,6,10,0,4,0,3,0,2,0,0,2,6,11,0,1,5,0,0,2,5,11,2,0,4,4,33,12,30,34,5,21,0,5,0,1,32,9,0,5,10,128,39,0,0.10775353929015724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105295511501743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160016993744848,0.0,0.08617046644005727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327610174361426,0.0,0.08243116262256353,0.0,0.0,0.07534378006625753,0.0,0.0,0.09592349504520127,0.0,0.0,0.1012379971927127,0.0,0.0,0.19705667225726134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603243313789848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24991979218395555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017367967027336,0.0,0.097469245294494,0.09078700422399938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21793370838680332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497503514840929,0.0,0.1688903307473466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618034884348473,0.0,0.11870267176954427,0.21338588976914,0.0,0.2294112924865877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535239242182135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018529444983156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535849146565303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160820580146194,0.09725177618842064,0.0,0.1438526483922504,0.0,0.0,0.11737519331946385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921124965940078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339242707793128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20572589163913574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30931675400199515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460915268040413,0.0,0.0,0.0690296764563393,0.0,0.0,0.11568697556127605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21576018117272186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913484119516896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605211566804061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155643557021628,0.0,0.16203450290554833,0.08660821324990403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566391058219914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961424042269992,0.0,0.0,0.08890795477792397,0.12711165854254247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19376674500338095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188578992608444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slicedgreenolive,2020/03/16,"Should I cancel my Psychiatrist appointment after getting “better”? I was on a wait list to get into the psychiatrist and my appointment is tonight. My problem was severe depression and mild anxiety. While waiting for my appointment I was able to get better with the help of my GP who put my on a combo of Wellbutrin and Trintellix.

Should I still go to my appointment? If yes, what should I do, just them them about my old symptoms?",5.489666666666667,7.263509300000003,6.130000000000003,74.8616666666667,68.5,9.833333333333336,32.083333333333336,10.125756701596842,3.5514583333333336,344,15,59,9,6,112,50,80,0.15,0.7240000000000001,0.127,-0.2593,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,2,3,4,0,0,4,1,8,1,0,0,0,13,14,5,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,3,0,15,2,12,8,0,10,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,1,5,48,17,0,0.26076367916100984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994835008165959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4612485669645937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22459537476061567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4087147792130184,0.0,0.1481980081685463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17478439747917587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27362761610719954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495156240529757,0.0,0.26213952096827986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945887340216252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20824621102015872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710333072777894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,westcovina-,2020/03/16,"Friendships make me feel crazy Please help me. I am driving myself crazy. I don’t know what is wrong with me, I have been diagnosed with depression but I don’t think it fits my core issues.

I really struggle with friendships. I have been treated badly (mostly mentally) by every non family person I’ve ever met and the results are extreme insecurity and feelings of utter self loathing. Whenever I make a friend I drive myself crazy wondering if I’m good enough, if they actually like me or gearing myself up for the eventual hurt. 

I met someone online as part of a game that I’m a club leader of. We eventually came really good friends and she told me I was her best friend, and ever since then I can’t stop thinking that it’s going to mess up somehow. She is very patient with me and it has helped enormously, except we must have different definitions of best friends. Mine would be she is my priority over other friends, I would message her first etc. She doesn’t treat me like a priority at all and I don’t understand how you can call someone your best friend if they’re not your first port of call. 

I am just so desperately sad and now in self destruct mode. Unfortunately as I am the leader I can’t quit the game or the discord as there are many members that rely on it, and oddly enough said friend once said if I abandon the game it’s like I’m abandoning her. She is quite emotionally closed off so this surprised me.

Anyway I’m rambling. I already know that I am intense so I don’t need that pointing out, I want to know if there are others that feel this way or how to stop feeling this way because it’s honestly making me not want to be here",5.243333333333332,5.83005021276596,6.0859574468085125,79.33333333333336,68.14893617021275,9.063019250253294,30.86423505572441,9.107695989026183,2.5040107396149938,1316,50,258,23,21,434,172,329,0.17,0.602,0.228,0.9762,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,2,3,1,7,14,30,1,2,10,0,31,1,0,6,4,62,59,26,0,11,13,0,4,3,7,3,1,2,0,3,18,17,0,4,11,4,0,4,9,11,0,2,9,6,50,19,27,45,9,26,0,5,0,0,37,12,0,11,11,181,68,0,0.0,0.0,0.08646048136629839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777192103785316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397701003701854,0.0540095265487604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789396112100872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809403049440864,0.10133440062604747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631075191322903,0.0899267835065897,0.0,0.0925677806508927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996626852352729,0.0,0.183094252923468,0.09881203414630414,0.0,0.16028691841141035,0.0746490295215746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352386834960726,0.0,0.1791945881480265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072564036746572,0.0,0.0,0.4791631087224815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035322498265336,0.14862637189804434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187729605612119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484776175712284,0.0,0.0,0.09247501955951473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460761577920647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12985594638255174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17742287051505815,0.08982614259540929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892876120777359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06569552058309779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943557396202122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594479099363673,0.0,0.0,0.07736180017075593,0.0,0.09725581379583326,0.08375531069392829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18847327533295816,0.0,0.0,0.1135184137795755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16855711958764047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848575233699677,0.0,0.0,0.07329054911165471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501403981418072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14814655546122218,0.0,0.09262359510389308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354216119903528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466076597370881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922353641456927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310399321630677,0.10451674259089852,0.1406525622795863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608254503923416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258773038932642,0.09686981272415504,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justa-arist,2020/03/16,Come along on my journey? Hey I posted yesterday and I was just ranting about my life I wasn’t in a good mood and I haven’t done anything bad but I wanna start a blog of some what to just vent and get advice from people that are like me so either I will do this on this community page or on my profile but I don’t wanna do it if nobody cares sometimes it will be depressed things or maybe a update on how I’m doing or what I’ve learned and I have great advice to give away I feel this could really be a thing that could not only help me but help everyone else. If it sounds stupid I’m sorry but it was worth a try.,1.0463333333333331,2.606015800000001,2.9575,93.89625000000002,79.8888888888889,5.6851851851851825,18.657407407407405,6.42735559955562,-0.1970370370370378,483,10,113,4,12,162,82,135,0.133,0.7440000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.0834,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,5,8,1,0,5,0,17,1,0,1,0,27,25,15,0,6,13,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,13,6,0,0,2,1,1,2,4,3,0,0,4,2,14,4,14,15,3,12,0,1,0,0,4,6,0,6,4,83,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689125824199542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533525251113622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17734835251153838,0.0,0.15760859855635598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19245569960552128,0.0,0.0,0.16260196877367725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014226022374068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16258065387891846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19316932400939105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768664284510647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803704241513252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954438679420846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09862048751041724,0.18107795547020464,0.0,0.15832482396655825,0.0,0.20811105283844072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530467215567989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333283632692405,0.09221970318130714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896370568029812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14356220109545925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308639804285352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18078206185403972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092593426786526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18669069711292685,0.21130389059548568,0.13360689584306734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25081050969790913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815718065707227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helnc,2020/03/16,"Does this forum help you with your mental health? then PLEASE help! Hello everyone! I’m currently a third year psychology with counselling student, and my dissertation surrounds the positive use of social media and the relationship with mental wellbeing.  Do you remember your parents saying social media was “no good”? Yeah.... me too. However, I am well aware of the immense support and comfort social media can bring to people and this lead me to want to prove that there IS something good that can come out of social media! 
Please, if you’re 18 or older, take 10 minutes out of your day to help me with my dissertation! ALL anonymous! THANK YOU :) 

[mental wellbeing and social media ](https://teesside.onlinesurveys.ac.uk/mental-wellbeing-and-the-impact-of-social-media)",6.205259391771016,9.522861356589154,6.025736434108532,69.53516994633277,71.09302325581395,8.000238521168754,27.752534287418012,8.841846274778883,2.9173167561121045,621,23,84,13,13,194,78,129,0.015,0.713,0.271,0.9872,3,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,6,0,1,3,6,0,0,4,1,6,1,0,2,2,20,14,8,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,12,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,1,1,12,6,14,13,1,11,0,0,0,0,18,3,0,2,5,54,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649342185793476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224221840966445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802753764010508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703781485298952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18791044345659272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906969048180625,0.0,0.0,0.225249524071879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4515504097002948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438251808180895,0.0,0.0,0.07765904290541019,0.0,0.0,0.24592382718786265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026520305190967,0.12689433858298815,0.0,0.0,0.08908105606448402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6851282840281626,0.0,0.08623678040009428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271164797306287,0.0,0.0,0.08422344995538956,0.0,0.0,0.10313094647101426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674741921846844,0.0,0.0,0.066071004755357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071746114667887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07213579495670855
mentalhealth,firexfalcon,2020/03/16,"Help me out? I'm a 16 y/o high school student in India,
who has struggled with ADHD all my life.
While I was in tenth grade, I lost my grandma and the loss and all of the pressure pushed me into depression.
I did all sorts of things during this phase like self doubt, distancing people in my life, and even attempting suicide.
I managed to come out of it in the 2019 summer break and have always valued my life ever since.

However, my ADHD still keeps making my life difficult every now and then.
I have a hard time concentrating on anything, I'm clumsy as hell and I've not been able to get any work done properly this whole academic year.

I have tried different things that different people on the internet like Tom Frank, Ali Abdaal etc. suggest. But none of it seems to help me out.
And I'm someone who has never failed on a test or an exam and has done well in all important tests.
However, nothing seems to help me this time.

I am looking for tips, techniques, methods etc to help me stay focused and study with interest.
Kindly help me out,
Thanks :)",3.961820388349517,5.563273665048541,4.725424757281555,84.1154186893204,72.05825242718447,7.868446601941748,26.46723300970873,8.472884824447931,1.815855339805826,829,28,160,14,16,267,126,206,0.12,0.7,0.18,0.9062,4,0,1,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,5,6,15,1,3,8,0,12,4,0,1,6,32,24,14,1,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,10,17,0,1,2,0,0,2,3,9,1,1,6,2,19,6,26,18,8,28,1,4,1,0,9,14,1,5,12,104,29,10,0.11630233921588595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795456215354448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967728630137598,0.0,0.0,0.0790895788439504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570691557314956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018416712159113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017103434715552,0.0,0.0,0.2430223815790513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23803534465511944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594157027213311,0.07681659817860803,0.10520212425534793,0.09798973686814327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06076317203827046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418405182993278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3897750321415705,0.12287980682309865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337486286477636,0.0,0.12111098920719908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285911266278876,0.11363889656562692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097664673448726,0.0,0.12695774187485726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763271452906845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969953381507641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159523116907696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16125879636423432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177041763720313,0.0,0.21175456322352426,0.12132870439986462,0.0,0.0,0.09620649683459263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854259460226422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239628190855058,0.0928791983316626,0.0,0.0,0.1215844568935594,0.0,0.12721588246868198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707556823792272,0.0,0.0,0.15453221267204298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563365855083975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896165404153806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456977030451843,0.0,0.0,0.12984740833855835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466948810333977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489489333305724
mentalhealth,visarieus,2020/03/16,"This morning I found out a friend lost his battle with mental illness. He was a young, loving, caring free spirit. In the last year he seemed to start declining into what I believe (although it is only conjecture) was schizophrenia. It seems he succumbed to his wounds last week and took his own life. 

My message to anyone struggling is that someone cares. Most likely many people care, even if you can't see it. We want to help, just reach out.  Its sad that mental health gets neglected to the point that this is so often the result. 

Stay strong everyone.",4.412610571736785,6.7317097864077695,4.110226537216828,85.97811218985979,72.49514563106796,6.131175836030206,24.06580366774541,6.937597516519254,0.982394606256742,440,13,77,4,9,133,80,103,0.132,0.634,0.23399999999999999,0.9001,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,1,0,2,4,13,1,1,5,0,6,5,0,1,0,16,19,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,10,6,0,1,3,0,1,1,1,5,0,0,5,1,8,9,10,14,2,13,1,3,1,1,12,5,0,5,7,48,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254796102434196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18134839026772567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4923326577140624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631349382097048,0.0,0.0,0.15380552594259989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764858789560955,0.12435838676144804,0.0,0.08409569374594103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17109445286723635,0.0,0.0,0.10788904078986204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624100661960034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136918046968006,0.07863761487954114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17570839410193706,0.0,0.14527395766945725,0.0,0.0,0.16318960673675395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32442248727207906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241840617084435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159037537033524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15216056060449518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826540472476927,0.29306644634903545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13638208109647448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392931508250358,0.17156344739758447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682718151176752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17883405002261438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493921050154808,0.0,0.12911353476281404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036538712775696
mentalhealth,DeepYogurtcloset1,2020/03/16,"Quarantine For all my friends who are struggling with mental health issues during this quarantine period, just remember that although it’s tough, make sure you are doing stuff. Clean you room, drink some water, eat, take a shower, do something creative, take a walk around wherever you live. Even small tasks will make a difference.",10.444047619047616,10.753450071428572,8.125714285714286,70.05261904761906,57.214285714285715,11.752380952380953,36.52380952380953,11.20814326018867,4.299638095238095,268,10,40,6,3,78,48,56,0.07,0.75,0.179,0.7717,1,2,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,3,0,0,3,4,0,1,3,0,5,4,0,2,2,9,9,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,5,2,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,3,8,2,5,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089585163434688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452417761235256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299449927068702,0.0,0.2401862992332781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15503624687309805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813509918426277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495058800156772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449960222052105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072699488177196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31336677177951805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23655155625210655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26590212411775377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807058009169172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453896465325484,0.2687084705867586,0.0,0.0,0.22122924203172156,0.0,0.3529738914083561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamsamtisfied,2020/03/16,"Self-diagonsing I'm just curious but can you diagnose yourself as depressed when you have self-harmed before and had suicidal thoughts? Like even after these major signs, are you considered depressed or do you have to be diagnosed by a professional that you are clinically depressed? Sorry if it sounds confusing",6.797924528301888,10.030614075471703,6.800603773584907,65.18543396226417,68.62264150943396,11.032452830188682,37.01509433962264,10.793553405168565,5.388074716981134,258,14,36,9,5,82,44,53,0.341,0.589,0.07,-0.9677,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,5,0,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,8,3,0,0,0,8,10,6,1,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,5,1,4,7,1,2,0,3,0,0,5,0,0,3,3,28,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19206115743638688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5832067398543458,0.4581783905025652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907821767846674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102696849420564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4709260090667848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526619869637352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468882698336653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17918719544721426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymousranter123,2020/03/16,"I'm not sure if this counts, I've had a mild anxiety problem lately, and it takes the form of nausea, and very rarely a full in panic attack. Anyway, I think I've started hallucinating.

I've had something like this go on for a very long time. And I think it's just becuase I'm tired. Anyway, here the wrap:
It was midnight in day, I was very tired, and closed my eyes, *I WAS NOT DREAMING*, and not even a second goes by when I hear the buzzing of a drone. J wake up to see the silloute of a drone, or a completely black one right above my head. I hear it, and see it. When I went to touch it, it flew slowly away and disappeared slowly with the sound following shortly after. Then another night, I was again, very tired at midnight, and across from me, the thick rope on my robe on the couch right next to me appeared to have started moving in it's own. I was again, 3/4 awake and not dreaming. I freaked out becuase I thought it was a ghost. It wasn't. In fact, the rope I saw moving was nothing like the one in my robe. Very strange..any answers? I don't drink, do drugs or anything. Is this anxiety? Or just fatigue?",0.6043812709030085,2.8400767826086977,1.9686956521739127,96.70397993311038,85.52173913043478,4.755852842809365,21.02006688963211,6.093298490706669,0.013772575250836194,860,28,194,7,26,275,119,230,0.121,0.836,0.044000000000000004,-0.9327,0,0,3,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,0,0,10,8,1,1,17,0,14,9,3,0,2,30,32,16,1,2,10,0,2,2,0,0,5,3,1,0,13,12,1,0,4,3,0,8,6,5,0,3,14,10,19,3,25,18,3,41,0,1,5,0,2,19,0,5,16,122,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907960169400162,0.12193775886724904,0.17791949495822826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569484214626116,0.0,0.0,0.13229400981470188,0.1092560917379295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121925407093258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499592541256878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391764314543094,0.13485677561359347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680690776515804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608896139085989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11934469602893867,0.0,0.2621293060031503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311775542732749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11362456101943208,0.0,0.0,0.10291092653413236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24719077471356926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367325382869375,0.10912809857166772,0.0,0.11158115343126096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157599066332066,0.0,0.0,0.13643852244057686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127159297376657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19861806562127413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185332430646029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952392787872007,0.0,0.0,0.16461801942141466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959975057700334,0.0,0.08743385391385787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14902488391365026,0.0,0.09231941867654532,0.06780827418276897,0.40096670216119057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4797475223140705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077998329723253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alpacabaka,2020/03/16,"Coping Social Isolation from Coronavirus This social distancing and staying at home is giving me major anxiety. I’m a college student and my family is 500 miles away from me. Even though school is cancelled, my professor is requiring me to attend a hospital visit this Wednesday, so I’m not sure if it’s worth going home for 3 - 4 days. FaceTime and phone calls are different to me, not to mention I don’t really live with anyone. So, there’s no one to be around during these times.

I can feel myself relapsing from the lack of social interaction, but I understand the importance of managing this virus.

If there is anything that you can share that will help me cope, please tell us. I’m shutting down social media for sure, but any other thing I can do will help as well.",5.62510204081633,6.7858324965986405,6.357965986394563,75.66143877551023,67.57142857142857,9.961632653061224,29.665986394557823,10.125756701596842,3.09596925170068,615,22,108,15,10,202,100,147,0.08199999999999999,0.774,0.14400000000000002,0.9073,1,2,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,1,0,1,8,4,0,0,4,0,14,0,0,0,2,17,21,11,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,9,5,0,1,2,0,1,3,4,0,1,1,0,1,14,4,17,18,2,13,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,2,3,77,23,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012619960054696,0.0,0.11263589145244347,0.0,0.0,0.10295152419501127,0.0,0.12116349425424787,0.13107213378903432,0.0,0.0,0.13833399529827647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503454250118912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495567549951596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15383131280414958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09724864077278664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13880192685139345,0.0,0.07444744420893702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14124313356114818,0.0836781723461312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973796964807161,0.0,0.2953814042961232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001295633831475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977159238538004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616219964316998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432378359061563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14901169066151185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6003582618388994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15693503680543672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775382340671447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869161568857024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781771123882184,0.0,0.14465959139749293,0.0,0.08585507071297667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532788952455442,0.17710796560991315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13238373306237966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ccerberus667,2020/03/16,"How do I become mentally strong? With all this Corona Virus panic going on it just makes me angry and bitter that people became so selfish and became hoarders of things like toilet paper, hand sanitizer, etc when in reality the flu kills more and including other sicknesses. Then its racism and xenophobia torwards asian people worldwide, dumb conspiracy theories saying that they know a friend from the Pentagon and they told them what's gonna happen in the next few days. Like how does things outside of the government gets to people? I'm just sick and tired of hearing the dumb things exit peoples months including their weak mentalities. How do I cope with a society that is just plain stupid?",6.344838709677423,8.746636064516128,6.184709677419361,72.80706451612906,67.38709677419354,9.153548387096777,28.529032258064518,9.642632912329526,3.0245703225806464,568,20,87,13,10,178,92,124,0.293,0.615,0.092,-0.986,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,4,1,8,12,5,1,7,0,3,6,1,4,1,17,12,12,1,0,3,0,1,2,1,1,5,2,0,0,11,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,1,4,7,4,10,10,4,10,0,0,0,0,8,4,2,0,7,57,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966148347969648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11481151940928473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579104280255154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985451448463647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754181960335335,0.0,0.093010813663987,0.0,0.1011758176424145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15742708691584814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006473267604965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969584952780636,0.0,0.09783798825044462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17394823013501565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883319621208847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3588150375836213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14209800759933186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893318084182584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088742019141099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4936810030544792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157277589884842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3548160758181868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20461376647866605,0.0,0.1701106974294882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Creepythinshitposter,2020/03/16,"Whenever someone is unpleasant towards me, I want to ruin their life and damage them emotionally. I've just had another angry episode, and I've had a desire to do emotional harm to someone because they were acting unpleasant to me yesterday.

Yesterday, I was talking to someone online (never met this person in real life) about a game, I briefly mentioned that, because I had no interest in spending my own money on it, that if they were interested in me playing it with them they could gift it to me (I didn't think much of it, just figured I should give them the option if they wanted to play with me). however, due to a typo when I said "" I don't beg for gifts"", it instead came out as "" I do t beg for gifts"", and didn't notice this until he got back to me and started passive aggressively implying I was a begger. I had to explain the typo but he still acted like I was doing a slip of the tongue sort of thing. And then when I explained why I didn't want to buy the game myself (again I didn't even think much of it but he insisted on digging it in to get the last word), because I didn't want to support the company that made it with my own money, he continued to hammer in why what I said was stupid and wouldn't accept my truthful explanation as to why I even suggested it. 

After this, because the guy had a rather hostile and unpleasant tone towards me, treating me like I was a fucking idiot or a begger, I have wanted to honestly harass or emotionally damage him in a way so he will feel hurt by me. 

I've had these emotions for a long while. Since I young age I would often have problems with people, but I never used to want to...actually want the person to be so harmed emotionally that it would make their lives miserable. I always feel powerless and weak when people talk to me like this, and I just want them to feel some of it, so I can feel better about myself and they can realise they shouldn't have FUCKED with someone like me, rather than treating me like I'm some fucking rat to be kicked around and treated like some kind of lesser being all for innocently suggesting ""you could gift it to me if you want another player"". Why the fuck do people who are considered normal have these weird hostile attitudes for no fucking reasons?

​

This dude also got mad at me for abruptly leaving a game once, and he sounded like he wanted to fucking hurt me over it and really laid it into me. He never apologized for it either. The smug arrogant fuck probably still thinks he was in the right, when he wasn't, he should have fucking realised acting like that makes him a fucking asshole.

I'm done venting. I just really don't understand why in situations like this, I just want the person harmed emotionally, rather than just leaving them behind. I really want to know why I have these, I do calm down. But I always feel a sense of resentment for that person, and a constant urge to just...yell at them. If I was near them in person, I fear I may actually harm them physically.",7.9901020408163275,6.409679370748299,8.333333333333336,72.72000000000001,63.115646258503396,11.257142857142858,35.96598639455783,10.125756701596842,3.4791251700680266,2362,88,446,42,28,784,236,588,0.19399999999999998,0.6829999999999999,0.12300000000000001,-0.9962,2,0,0,0,0,0,68.0,0,2,16,1,28,55,17,2,26,0,52,12,0,5,5,99,101,37,0,30,20,0,5,9,0,8,3,3,0,6,33,23,0,0,15,5,4,4,15,32,0,0,29,8,76,23,76,59,9,53,0,6,0,9,53,22,9,13,35,328,109,0,0.0,0.0,0.05232480524283287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042879419343098975,0.08923128175893562,0.058096603642791476,0.06515344682691902,0.0,0.11244924401671096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04773263902151542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041230013232761265,0.0,0.13074356807932674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04742200698139072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06132631571519252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794352888772138,0.0,0.08562146475540469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0548712682616568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618876864323896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708302234983345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060336738462219076,0.1355579129511698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4461324887828699,0.028013926403844532,0.0514366197729972,0.0,0.0,0.08576867388236642,0.0,0.0,0.05309164164543639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480136550788532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055836359830102364,0.029467823088288776,0.043706972108768775,0.0,0.11355041714960877,0.0,0.0,0.07574594387956192,0.2357615987113605,0.0,0.04734691756071812,0.04745148671471371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050735978109078345,0.07158273929406593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883286539243885,0.0,0.12406377355540565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253563307999588,0.0,0.061046048743686326,0.0,0.057102917091732874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115188337388384,0.2340919841759992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057810788198289165,0.05130652976842555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06103062243563887,0.10304989282896072,0.05512967932939493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04579067947174753,0.1020086670273158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04435452645886412,0.06027045853945695,0.0,0.0,0.18172619369463008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03795209131164004,0.0,0.08564105326405655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084666613697015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619449442304092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03562235057520776,0.10307145029218467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05581969229362113,0.0,0.04630995075755882,0.0,0.0,0.379513376349239,0.042560588443898574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2902990419192724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617937474582816,0.0,0.06515344682691902,0.0
mentalhealth,eeh1807,2020/03/16,"How to handle your mental health during the pandemic For anyone feeling crap during the pandemic, remember we are all in the same boat and we will get through this together ❤

https://youtu.be/hKSk8vlOrGQ",19.333636363636366,13.592753272727276,15.15878787878788,45.158181818181816,46.57575757575758,19.26060606060607,54.21212121212121,15.903189008614273,8.145630303030304,170,7,22,5,1,50,28,33,0.076,0.88,0.044000000000000004,-0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,2,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,2,2,1,1,1,8,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,4,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3316035537834237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23979282737975186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477737548528772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.504100901402694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4779280260946334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5372278218221891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CueThe-dreamer,2020/03/16,"I need help helping my gf My gf (29 F) and I (26 M) have been together a while there has always been issues. I’ve been trying to stay the more I’m with her the more I realize. She has mental issues. I tried to express this to her. Calmly. That she should seek help. She’s treating me like I’m the devil. She hasn’t forgiven me for saying it. And she “doesn’t trust” my intention. 

We have 4 kids 11yo (not from me) a 4yo a 2yo and a 1yo (all mine) .. she shows sighs of manic depression, anxiety, and Bipolar disorder. 

She feels like me saying she needs a mental health exam is a cardinal sin and the utmost disrespect. 

How do I get it through that i just love her and want her to be healthy for me her and our kids sake.",0.4131870860927158,2.4418563907284785,2.6257243377483452,93.04666597682122,84.43046357615893,6.1591059602649025,19.371274834437088,7.413659706084162,0.4377182119205294,549,15,125,9,16,186,91,151,0.115,0.708,0.177,0.7964,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,2,0,0,0,3,10,0,0,10,0,13,3,0,2,1,20,21,9,0,4,2,0,1,2,2,1,2,2,0,2,5,9,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,3,1,0,3,3,30,6,10,16,3,2,2,1,0,1,26,0,0,0,3,83,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15783824607062052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451132228892238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338072343883045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174025104678821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591355318198767,0.1355154069922021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910580509377206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20163283924754255,0.0,0.0,0.38143797043556144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39597658827508736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18534704420978929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17120368347856146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3823281592605362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28130719224891776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017000579202138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20218554389202945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575757003072111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188476451776892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,booboo_bob,2020/03/16,"Twitter for tracking depressive thoughts. Hi. I am 24 yo female and I have been suffering depression for as long I as I can remember. 
Just a little back story on my depression: I am not diagnosed..... well kinda. I suffered from suicidal thoughts since I can remember, probably 10 or 9. I have had neve",2.3351785714285707,5.17516073214286,4.597857142857143,76.34714285714288,84.53571428571428,9.62857142857143,33.0,9.606745405546679,4.479207142857144,235,14,40,9,7,81,41,56,0.355,0.645,0.0,-0.9685,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,0,0,9,10,4,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,4,0,9,1,6,6,0,4,0,5,0,0,1,2,0,2,2,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165482457917641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.556077659541459,0.2184326325744884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21569598277435556,0.0,0.19045321690941455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320317306521597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4875797508306454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780231312745157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23540374600546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.341703857156967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934987610896316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,witchychick,2020/03/16,"How can I help my husband? Hi! This is my first post in r/mentalhealth.

So basically I’m 22 and married, my husband (I’ll call him A going forward.) is 26. We met 2 years ago and just got married in January of this year, and he’s the love of my life. Best decision I’ve ever made. 

We had a blowout fight the other day and he dropped the D-word on me. I was completely thrown for a loop, my heart shattered. He didn’t say he wanted a divorce, just that he wasn’t sure what to do and Maybe it’s the best option. We continued talking him thru it and he came to the conclusion that he is no longer proud of himself, he’s no longer as great as he used to be and he didn’t realize until this conversation that it’s on him to fix these things because no one can make him proud of himself, but himself. This is where we have the beginning of our breakthrough I believe. 

A is a Marine Corps vet; went in at 17, did 5 years infantry as a FAST marine. Meaning, he’s seen some shit & repressed a lot of shit. 
Anyone that knows a marine (aside from some of you lucky few) know that being around a bunch of other just as toxically masculine men is not good for people, let alone being in the straight up military where they tell you to shove the feelings where the sun don’t shine & do what you’re told to do, & knows how it impacts our men. 

He doesn’t know how to deal with feelings. Doesn’t know how to articulate. He just shuts down. He’s been like this since before we met, most often I would see him that way when a former squad mate passed, but he also gets this way when minor things go wrong, or he’s having a bad day.  He’s made increasing strides in these areas & I really am so proud of how far he’s come, but we’ve still got a ways to go. 

I’ve come to the conclusion that he doesn’t know how to accept the feelings he’s having and move on with his day. There are some things, like a friends death, that I understand are impossible to simply move on from. But a setback at work? Bad traffic? An Offhand comment? Not so much. He is unable to put on a brave face for family events that we have to go to when he’s like this, I truly believe it is holding him back from so much that he could be excelling at. He believes he is of no good and no use to anyone, that he has nothing to offer in life. This is simply untrue. I’ve seen my husband shine before and I’d love to see him shine again, and I just want to help him get there in whatever way I can. 

He’s a very masculine guy, doesn’t want to try therapy because he’s unable to put his feelings into words and doesn’t think talking to a stranger would help. He’s warming up to the idea of medication but I don’t know if he’ll go for it. We’ve done supplements in the past but they’ve helped minimally. I’m just not sure what my next step from here should be. I know that he doesn’t want to be this way, and I want to know what I can do as a wife to help him during this hard time we’re going thru. I know I can’t do it for him, but I want to be there for him as best I can. 

Let me know if I should post this somewhere else, I figured this is a good place to start. to clarify a little, I also have struggled with mental illness for years (anorexia, depression, GAD.) I’ve gone to therapy and done the meds, & I’ve seen the changes they’ve made to my life. I’ve taken huge steps to get where I am over the last few short years, but I know men are different in some ways with these things and just in general things that worked for me may not work for him. Any and all help is so greatly appreciated & thank you for taking the time to read my post ❤️

TL;DR my husband is depressed and I want to know what I can do to be supportive and help him get to the next level of recovery without trying to do the work for him. He’s a manly man and does not want help but doesn’t want to feel how he feels anymore. TIA ❤️",2.9614960011879745,3.553484632406292,4.236982116718643,90.52721801480727,73.29262394195888,7.448006958145061,24.665966609389248,7.5412164511997375,0.8801290608625552,3009,84,704,34,57,993,303,827,0.087,0.764,0.15,0.9942,1,1,0,0,2,0,92.0,8,3,1,14,38,36,3,2,42,0,72,11,4,13,4,133,145,55,1,16,25,5,8,3,2,6,5,1,0,6,47,34,0,2,29,1,0,20,24,10,0,2,24,17,68,26,103,104,16,97,0,2,8,2,102,38,2,13,34,427,115,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438708248078008,0.0,0.0,0.051257796357402574,0.0,0.07915594077110295,0.0,0.3217411560651994,0.0,0.03365560736281765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04908181747824103,0.0692105780411942,0.0,0.0,0.04405752229295983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03805555830094847,0.0826459097876215,0.060338562704647776,0.0,0.08422646732008862,0.16727837807592238,0.15581339346323347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050535889838852065,0.05660457031402175,0.0,0.0,0.05235496277559805,0.08526430515625595,0.05189041852487797,0.0,0.0,0.03951457188986315,0.0,0.0,0.09575288818208703,0.051023093708630486,0.08525312817171639,0.0,0.0,0.05170760784388105,0.0,0.0,0.043309946533806015,0.10129304284186938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041343417106236326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044767483142858715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046655752140297116,0.0,0.1501449547545338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04209705714740825,0.0,0.0,0.03823665819307335,0.0,0.1034281122813588,0.0,0.16876140657819558,0.1245322200552637,0.07916501871825464,0.10912810250351083,0.0,0.04900391500057871,0.0,0.0,0.04433425481723709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586471259922461,0.2653824310779419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055869365140953725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3535867886264797,0.04034180672834543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121589219184003,0.10487096500900114,0.07253647332291613,0.049603028327238896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04207551619563168,0.08933519979505021,0.14048886877519695,0.033035656490916936,0.0,0.049720406223030894,0.05391025622946636,0.05497339345372362,0.04985702058600098,0.04987533241230001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10520229590511003,0.0727632244024837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526857452435352,0.0,0.0,0.04748799195403235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033536412574148015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04724480197921902,0.034310858734901264,0.0,0.05170760784388105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14219622005458135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995043384299471,0.0,0.0,0.049504437453897376,0.0,0.031705230380918215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039357264991111564,0.0,0.0,0.07887590963792768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160369189509323,0.04093950341556125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035030016007984444,0.0,0.039523612047439885,0.0,0.0,0.0517387853424391,0.0,0.0,0.05616185077413174,0.09328944742932777,0.0,0.03721110620826462,0.07955805372214601,0.043257354276707065,0.04556470442049602,0.11319464508752958,0.0,0.1643982541890704,0.031711862938402564,0.0,0.0,0.05771725205891274,0.0,0.0,0.047290813887400966,0.0,0.06720234104126656,0.0,0.0,0.0515219226932719,0.0,0.08548874437750474,0.0,0.04083529481285105,0.2627199026977067,0.2357021249116369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045878694057321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477076007812758,0.0,0.1441202792514165,0.0,0.0,0.07031403605434909,0.05411068789843028,0.0,0.15935305006939532
mentalhealth,Lele_344,2020/03/16,"Vivid past events, PTSD, can't read or write... I don't know if this is just me being tired from working from home all day long and getting less then 5 hours of sleep or it's something more serious. Reason I'm asking here is:

1) I (like most people) would like to get more opinions and not just from my doctor.
2) We're in lockdown so no hospitals or anything is working.

If you don't want to know then just don't even read this and avoid posting rude comments because I'm sick of people who can only judge. Other then that feel welcome to say what you think 🙂




I'm a 20 year old female and I'm currently in my last year of college, I live alone with 2 dogs and I'm really busy every day.


I suffer •OCD (diagnosed at age 15), •PTSD (diagnosed 5 months ago), •depression (diagnosed at age 16), •anxiety (diagnosed at age 11), anorexia (diagnosed at age 15) 


I NEVER had any problems with memory, motor skills, thinking etc. But today while I was writing assignment I noticed I was writing like a drunk person...for example I'd forget to put -ed at the end of the word [looke -instead of- looked] or [everyo -instead of- everyone] etc. I then went a couple pages back and saw I was writing s*it...I skipped words, letters, I wrote e instead of c... 


Last couple of weeks I feel dizzy and overall numb/disoriented...could it be just fatigue or..? 


I should probably mention I had hallucinations too yesterday...I kept seeing event that happened 9 months ago which caused me PTSD...like I was literally living trough that again I could see it and I had the same feelings like I did when it was all happening...


What is this?! BTW my therapist is NOT working anymore temporary so I don't have anyone to ask...",1.8118249367191943,4.322441042296074,3.3351726953539647,87.08477423042379,82.6858006042296,6.3578345717318525,24.655915734465584,7.63319966405982,1.473843733159141,1319,52,256,23,37,433,196,331,0.10099999999999999,0.855,0.044000000000000004,-0.9311,1,3,1,0,0,0,76.0,0,2,0,4,15,11,1,1,6,0,26,11,1,2,3,54,53,24,0,7,14,0,3,4,0,2,9,1,1,0,15,10,1,2,8,3,0,2,9,6,0,0,13,10,26,5,25,35,10,43,0,2,6,0,15,7,0,9,37,147,41,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536053036968571,0.0,0.0,0.08973468598783302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058919336628799265,0.0,0.06628067410375534,0.0,0.08592529902011725,0.06058190098788794,0.0,0.07129874831530725,0.0,0.1619966137406792,0.0,0.0,0.06662213003493872,0.0,0.05281598470899532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900490689367954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835271714596215,0.1917348173016264,0.0,0.11175347575142452,0.0,0.07462438135876501,0.43969757986354574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886814656597101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673884203009723,0.0,0.19325682774961125,0.057226034996275724,0.0,0.07299938091835233,0.08278987072923825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131425961756252,0.061896857833173585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09053343917838663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15323396320147384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690870353135656,0.0,0.0853246357005526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523204033679933,0.14124912174173568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21164382522779154,0.0,0.1530124417218109,0.07667519048349103,0.14551443706688524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831317909806765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682343117194514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864216570974653,0.09091590419632306,0.0,0.0,0.06589492776446773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270931978039099,0.12013291063397875,0.07565220278667255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829788120834285,0.0,0.09341442184423912,0.08290441913216387,0.3038385816727224,0.08709885322790371,0.0,0.0,0.17333032106786056,0.0,0.05550490061191872,0.08908211220628423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689009685608009,0.0,0.0,0.13808445712360304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670428566533406,0.0,0.0,0.06670102441118833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059770792811136,0.0,0.11103302385553247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995819047959227,0.08212621417502076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05110352775941518,0.0,0.06949875686779694,0.0,0.0,0.08031773695575585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892285991909935,0.0,0.0,0.061547787792899926,0.0,0.0,0.11158884638329178
mentalhealth,Pieinyoureyez,2020/03/16,"I somehow managed to get over my four year long depression! I shit you not.  It was with an Anon who told me I was holding onto the past.  It took me that bloody long to realize that.  I legitmately thought ""hmm why didn't I think of that?"".  I don't know wether to feel like an idiot or what.  But I am happy to get over this mountain in my life!",0.6886692759295521,2.465086438356168,2.540156555772996,95.42534246575345,81.87671232876713,5.815264187866927,21.38747553816047,6.868970318607317,0.26317769080234843,262,8,63,3,7,87,53,73,0.18,0.741,0.079,-0.8353,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,1,5,2,0,3,0,5,2,1,0,0,11,13,2,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,1,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,6,1,12,2,10,7,0,9,0,1,0,0,3,4,1,2,5,43,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22786487014219084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376932651955326,0.1890014927501861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764430335808202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816287055276793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14539508475383747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18686633038911504,0.1292504992974735,0.0,0.0,0.4682539943253092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25255215612040866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715667161562697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951916452546922,0.0,0.2100308393139634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527981177105043,0.29393554588627085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387239672537655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17036776404350798
mentalhealth,jhaaaaayj,2020/03/16,"Please help me 
Hi. I do have a trauma using video call because my girlfriend had video sex chat with another guy. I really dont know how to overcome it. I will be having a online class with my professor tomorrow through video chat and i dont know what to do. Can someone help me with this one? Thank you.",1.154861751152076,3.5245738870967784,2.709447004608297,91.41274193548388,84.32258064516128,6.123502304147466,21.76036866359447,7.447530270364453,0.8907529953917049,239,8,50,4,7,78,44,62,0.045,0.79,0.165,0.7506,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,10,1,0,2,0,8,14,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,9,1,6,11,0,1,0,0,0,1,9,0,0,0,1,33,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590905152478084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15062092553497136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523017506240642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5791643397814732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446533262104265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33123218053221354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27158327417626393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674314161497829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27122549712336724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582891911976401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20935460069152487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274829775159317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21340239514804515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,baeuti,2020/03/16,"I feel like I have a personality disorder? So I’m obviously not on here to get diagnosed, and have plans to go to the doctors and go off their recommendation but I’ve had bad experiences in the past when it comes to diagnoses (I had a therapist who refused to acknowledge anything wrong and claimed “I think you’re just rebelling against your parents” when I was starving myself, making myself sick and self harming which eventually ended in an attempt two years after leaving home) I’m much better now but I’ve noticed something incredibly strange happening with my personality. I’ve gone from a very flamboyant gay “twink” to a relatively heteronormative bisexual within a 3 year period. But not in a linear sense. My personality switches between different defaults on the regular. Certain music, food and people bring out different personalities. And I’m not talking about acting different depending on circumstance. It feels like my gender, age, sexuality and personality changes. A friend commented that I dress like a completely different person every day and I’ve had friends burst into laughter when I’m speaking on the phone or to different people and I basically change into a different person. It sounds like D.I.D except not at all ahaha like I’m always me and I’m always conscious (I do dissociate a fair amount but Always come too) it’s really starting to take a toll on my life. Each personalities has different career paths and dreams, different friend preferences and I end up abandoning things when I’m spending a lot of time in one state and then regretting it when I switch back. I’ve done Alevels in Drama, gone to uni for computer science and dropped out and gone to art school. I had a relatively traumatic childhood which I won’t get into but again referencing DID thats what results in splits in personalities except it’s like mine only half split? I’m just asking if anyone has similar experiences, knows what this is or has any advice.",6.428793410974716,8.553715371104815,7.426169342146682,65.10702444654288,66.6770538243626,10.782037561640964,35.17039135452733,10.825029732296443,4.556254306998216,1598,78,249,49,27,536,206,353,0.11599999999999999,0.755,0.128,0.5455,9,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,1,3,14,17,1,0,18,0,15,7,0,3,3,57,42,30,0,3,16,1,2,6,3,1,5,2,1,10,15,24,1,2,7,3,1,9,5,6,0,3,10,4,22,11,41,31,5,53,0,2,0,1,23,21,0,5,27,159,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709914059058332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714056122475928,0.0,0.0,0.046694900691405763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048012520374224286,0.0,0.0565058631426865,0.0,0.06419298165746501,0.0,0.0,0.05279953787379877,0.05733283176977226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072906257706288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14527800738546084,0.11829851171224755,0.07199447966378354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04428357268351798,0.0,0.0,0.13938809226812673,0.0,0.5739267367202939,0.07869662209803963,0.07028205796404711,0.0,0.0702686557583404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121634519761968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05785365276584632,0.0,0.0,0.13433608716113574,0.0,0.0,0.06943868893324691,0.09810930655377964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303060591980753,0.0,0.15915240552776416,0.0,0.07174978866988546,0.0,0.0780483822082385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607206827473506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887710406827477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037736767932254785,0.0,0.0,0.07270685940639575,0.0,0.0,0.04850047961514711,0.2012789953130001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058376960163412435,0.0,0.0,0.045834760385961855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05047704979489034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817613699252668,0.0,0.0,0.04652952590675664,0.052223213703414095,0.0,0.0,0.07624492161633165,0.0,0.06554899790761252,0.09520803615228147,0.539604664359844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043988883281028734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949316088153776,0.0,0.0,0.07163310117186135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05286206344307488,0.0,0.0,0.048601800617579016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0516279171634239,0.05519073504912254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972594822444344,0.04561831299280074,0.043998085510235985,0.0,0.0,0.0400394104319342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707622470486425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665623607485296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507495468800593,0.0,0.08843667288659582
mentalhealth,mattjellly,2020/03/16,"I work for an Assisted Living facility, what low resource activities we could provide to keep the residents busy and engaged while in quarantine? To be clear, we work with seniors and people with intellectual disabilities. We thought about purchasing some tablets so residents can Skype with family, and running virtual tours (if they exist) on a projector. All our facilities already have Netflix and etc..",10.512727272727274,11.983459818181819,10.154090909090916,51.65113636363637,56.87878787878788,14.47878787878788,48.31818181818181,13.427899808715575,7.691527272727272,332,21,43,13,4,108,56,66,0.03,0.8490000000000001,0.122,0.7579,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,4,0,1,2,2,2,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,2,17,6,7,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,10,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,1,9,3,3,6,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,2,2,33,7,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722431680743657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26932413487652995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3762031495755533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3179971205868693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29982725477837424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978614684422545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338565724918984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677959549772684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4911488049995684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cptjk,2020/03/16,"Quad shot of espresso at 7pm, relapse with s/h, opening up about my trauma and other brilliant ideas I’ve had this week Throwaway account.

In September, I was raped by someone I’ve known for over a decade. Someone I loved, and for a long time I called a best friend; for a while, a boyfriend. What he did broke me in so many ways, and as a CSA survivor, split through the cracks that were already there. I’m still so very angry and recovery isn’t going very well. Therapy twice a week, but I still can’t leave the house on my own. I still have regular panic attacks and while I’ve come to terms with what happened, I’m still dragging myself through the hellscape that is the aftermath.

Less than two months after my assault, I hooked up with a guy that I knew from experience was a shitty person, but I thought it was the best thing for me at the time. My little diseased brain thought that if I just let someone else close, let someone else touch me and want me in any capacity, maybe I could stop... everything. I don’t entirely understand my thought process at the time but spoiler alert: it didn’t work. Shitty people don’t just stop being shitty people and it only made things so much worse. We slept together once and after a month of him doing his usual routine, I broke it off. This was in December.

Since then, I’ve had this entirely delusional thought that if I just told him what happened, told him everything I was dealing with at the time of our hook up, maybe he could understand. What I expected him to do with that information, I don’t know, but I knew it was something I had to do. Maybe it was closure. Maybe it was therapeutic. Maybe I just wanted to tell him since I couldn’t tell my rapist. So last night, I typed out everything I could without wanting to stab myself in the eyes, put it in a private pastebin post, then sent him the link. It’s been 24 hours with 4 views on the link (only one of which are mine) and no response. He’s been active on social media. I can’t say I’m surprised and part of me expected this, but still. What kind of person, no matter how immature and bitter, sees an account of someone they call a friends’ rape and doesn’t go, “oh shit that sucks sorry” in the very least?

Oh. Did I mention that he’s been friends with my rapist just as long as I have?

I’ve been struggling with self harm for nearly 20 years, and I’ve relapsed several times this year due to everything that happened. I want to make it very clear that I didn’t relapse because of him. I think I’ve just been desperately trying to find anything to make this pain go away. Running, spending time with friends, therapy, immersing myself in work, writing, distracting myself with video games... nothing works, at least not for very long. I didn’t hurt myself because some fuckboy didn’t pity me for being a victim and drop his entire world for me so we can live happily ever after. I don’t care. I don’t even want that. I guess I really just wanted someone to care, because I feel like I’m the only one that’s angry. I wanted someone to be angry too. Instead, I just got more indifference.

I’m okay now, I think. I have therapy today but I’m not sure how much I’m going to tell her. I know I’m a idiot for all of this— you can’t make people care, you can’t expect them to care, but it’s still absolutely heartbreaking when they don’t.",4.009554726368158,5.125015829850746,4.683003731343284,86.34908271144279,71.29850746268656,7.61318407960199,27.83893034825871,7.937092434478242,1.6104452736318402,2626,93,539,34,48,842,287,670,0.198,0.6970000000000001,0.105,-0.9976,0,0,1,0,0,2,87.0,3,2,3,5,30,39,11,3,28,1,53,11,4,6,4,99,106,38,0,16,20,0,2,1,4,0,1,1,0,4,38,30,1,2,19,2,3,8,22,22,1,4,35,7,77,17,78,62,13,80,0,5,3,5,46,28,2,4,42,350,115,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05952408585165901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03668102167251493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04438799012035435,0.0,0.0,0.061364490174525874,0.050678366899226036,0.0,0.0,0.09864389471854226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321331788547208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060214833050193116,0.1101574575930379,0.0,0.21998153167667645,0.0,0.0,0.046464498346624264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292000039322012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0556097290400629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011982832703906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03562683407580088,0.04879178086684421,0.0,0.0,0.1939110276482764,0.05276362998524806,0.0,0.0,0.027273663890029918,0.0385347173533764,0.0,0.0,0.049300145149894566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666955134987939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12262128655997093,0.0,0.0431407125713841,0.0,0.05942094587671658,0.053409039652636936,0.14309678231538075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05311999405304905,0.06223947035214718,0.0577438415215642,0.060891647904980875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05617016659874145,0.059287981423139485,0.043968265702602975,0.0,0.057114628067243225,0.0,0.11031452485963966,0.0,0.026352339263235856,0.05406200926577169,0.04762997185731007,0.14320549847269026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04868291878489436,0.051039293242046674,0.10801602407400132,0.05468665202458736,0.2709496932520303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861087210138546,0.0,0.07930415227681456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050618997352528665,0.0,0.05175684524934519,0.0,0.0,0.05744429572551661,0.07310222413693727,0.12307130791366346,0.057395919226385414,0.06328691965311621,0.0,0.05841171898334334,0.0,0.11218552729919998,0.09419658294778001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05165957016060544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05422455692317328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034555318826882564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042895220239133815,0.0,0.0,0.042983163543567265,0.0,0.05627114090935648,0.060936800059286325,0.05536859258301357,0.08923938265973869,0.0,0.0,0.054984995190174406,0.3199220644204499,0.04152561556183307,0.0,0.060381367761142515,0.0,0.0,0.25845912470857396,0.09019244167747592,0.0,0.056389756571509984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05083777282760688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143770450619264,0.0,0.18505513144841496,0.0,0.0716706236773503,0.06912509521396926,0.0,0.1712892085810899,0.1887169425434258,0.0,0.0511287739204292,0.10308388438302712,0.0,0.036621691321812234,0.0,0.05269150197726945,0.11230679883729933,0.0,0.0,0.059407244052007924,0.2225305753490231,0.22270629670636452,0.042815028606958364,0.08653476270248561,0.0,0.04849850090108737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199619544334858,0.0,0.11780679731196644,0.0,0.05496942624955849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947112996848896
mentalhealth,Stuffed_Shark,2020/03/16,"I've been hurting for a long time. I'm on my way to recovery. Hi, my name is Barrett, I'm 24, and I've been struggling with mental health since about ages 11-12. I suffer from bipolar 1 which has sometimes induced psychosis. I also suffer from severe ADHD. Very recently I witnessed a traumatic event involving my abusive partner and I am in the developing stages of PTSD. I've been hospitalized twice and I have attempted suicide 3 times. August of 2019 I was hospitalized for a suicide attempt. 

For the longest time I would gauge my mental health by asking myself if, gun-in-hand, I would honestly kill myself. For the longest time the answer to that question was yes. There would be a no one day every few months but they weren't common. Lately however, for the past few months, it *has* been no. I've learned that I may qualify for disability. I also may have the chance to move in with my best friend next summer. 

When you're in the depths of your mental health and someone tells you that ""it gets better"", it is almost impossible to believe them. I know that because I've been told that by many different people at many stages of my life. For me, though, it may have been the truth. I feel better. I still have depression symptoms and I'm currently suffering mental whiplash from the death of my abusive partner, but I don't want to die. For 12 years I've never not wanted to die.

I hope someone, even one person, reading this can feel a sense that they may also one day feel better. It's really hard. Trust me, I know how unbelievably hard just existing can be. Time moves forward, though, and brains mature and situations change. Thank you for reading this if you have.",3.4883079888627115,5.711281726708076,4.351524951809811,83.64077639751551,74.90062111801242,7.0500749625187416,26.010280573998713,7.990435384864732,1.6786704647676165,1324,48,246,21,29,426,170,322,0.151,0.705,0.14400000000000002,0.5517,3,0,0,1,0,4,48.0,0,4,3,6,12,17,1,1,14,1,31,7,1,2,2,39,46,18,6,8,6,0,5,0,3,7,6,0,0,3,14,9,0,0,9,2,0,3,6,7,0,4,10,5,34,10,33,27,3,36,0,5,0,0,18,7,0,9,25,159,48,4,0.0,0.20018455965443202,0.0,0.0,0.1015257983931633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845922300176447,0.0,0.0,0.20267039743044685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789752610161279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05149683171641877,0.0,0.0,0.0951774575488599,0.08865415131631578,0.22414102497436647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943050697642974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936622241970191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896227659494613,0.0,0.07276053319743701,0.0,0.1753490642586283,0.08826123328886681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557967348377241,0.0,0.07117611941285816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12814341478286415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526727399873082,0.0,0.044136120037954855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15135088124465554,0.0,0.0,0.269387585970454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390543345757494,0.0,0.0,0.0904351424276212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346207658705202,0.0,0.0928534871072869,0.0,0.09529454349114323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059669109271982275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07476012049966002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17129428989882511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3405346743320843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348586142513591,0.1795728862460635,0.0,0.0,0.06515442263806295,0.0,0.08984300958316249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17173286044186087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064353898877223,0.05856621169336956,0.07376268334950015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874992956245866,0.0,0.09463437580463033,0.0,0.16900115418778192,0.0,0.054118588188732816,0.0,0.0834115533037106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543577370734918,0.0,0.06988083982923624,0.0949564925134875,0.0,0.0,0.14315538963231692,0.0,0.08355062143527983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746401330090862,0.0,0.0,0.08831445107611978,0.0,0.1848098205220665,0.0,0.0,0.08780469309671142,0.0,0.0,0.07383724748595981,0.07777573116006306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659978545468392,0.0,0.2462981784104551,0.0,0.0,0.08072207806515677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697029631070664,0.0996542915423,0.06705447902469355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18003163746461434,0.0,0.0,0.05440087953762013
mentalhealth,ap_101,2020/03/16,"Vent: a lot of change Today I woke up feeling anxious. It a lack of sleep and immense amount of change. Today I am leaving Ottawa, a city I have lived in for two years almost. It’s weird because all I wanted to do over this past year was go home. My mental health severely declined this year and all I wanted to do is be home with family. Not that it is happening it’s bittersweet. I have made some good friends and I like the school I am at and my professors. However, I hated my roommates and felt isolated. Coming home was a struggle most days and I kept myself in my room to avoid awkwardness. It’s also weird because my school isn’t technically over I still have classes left to finish online. A lot of things changed in such a short period of time and I guess I’m just trying to deal with it

I definately feel like I want to cry but nothing is coming out. I feel a bit anxious and my appetite dropped but nothing huge has happened if that makes sense.

I guess I’m in the what if stage - what if I have an anxiety attack now, what about now, what about now. I won’t be home for two more days, until then I’m staying with some distant family. I’m hoping I am okay.",1.9814204545454537,3.9039606041666697,3.562045454545455,88.95477272727275,78.375,6.53030303030303,23.40909090909091,7.520522993642371,1.0023749999999991,915,30,192,13,22,303,128,240,0.135,0.795,0.07,-0.8694,1,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,9,13,2,3,10,1,19,2,1,2,2,44,43,16,0,8,7,0,4,2,1,1,1,0,5,0,15,14,0,2,4,0,0,3,3,7,0,2,6,4,26,6,28,34,11,36,0,0,0,0,2,13,0,12,19,131,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866781937935652,0.0,0.0,0.07879780512165492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537843250277168,0.22263131449594695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209693565822858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013112999491528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757388221285703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127085179271193,0.1697570652584225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823524818129207,0.12709288103636845,0.10158448640975157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857786455011084,0.0,0.14946563415827113,0.07039288877792478,0.09460833342979946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761273180875655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599928570558059,0.08264585501891603,0.0,0.0,0.2170931731934607,0.0,0.17426702592422882,0.0,0.0,0.09728217349597752,0.0,0.1047373014047486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39535155196441096,0.09786674439971367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433354484635196,0.10705775228566307,0.0,0.0,0.09627771600263554,0.0,0.0870075490810248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16754059358166473,0.0,0.09323549098710282,0.06577237783743255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992993497523285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18909254310719345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406209219684332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994438455062983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131565724797347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860541150342828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502440142850196,0.07868958032661043,0.0,0.0,0.10300939348150573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654617782050784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745611429276265,0.0,0.18679789774646324,0.0,0.0,0.06689828863763413,0.0,0.1925072917605164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435416295720849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19035848168950373
mentalhealth,b0nelessbastard,2020/03/16,"I haven't left my house since Wednesday and now I've stopped eating or showering. This coronavirus thing is messing me up. I can't do anything. I'm so scared all the time. My stomach hurts and I feel nauseous.

I already have diagnosed anxiety and stress, and I have a chronic illness. My head is all over the place and I don't know how to gather the pieces and put myself back together.

My family thinks I'm stupid and that I need to chill, but I can't chill when I'm afraid to die.

I can't visit my friends or my boyfriend because I'm scared of going outside and especially taking public transport.

I'm constantly ridiculed and made fun of by my parents and brothers, but I don't know what to do.

I've seriously considered putting myself in a mental ward, but I'm too scared of being in a hospital right now. And because of trauma related to my chronic illness, I generally feel very uncomfortable in hospitals. 

I haven't showered since Friday. I haven't eaten since yesterday. I'm just shaking and crying all the time. My parents are yelling at me because I need to put my shit back together, my boyfriend thinks I'm overreacting.

Jesus christ I just need some sympathy. All this could've been avoided if my family just took me seriously. I need someone to take me seriously.",4.145722891566265,5.9796858514056215,5.2357811244979935,79.69945481927712,72.01204819277109,8.514136546184739,32.12871485943775,9.120678840339163,2.9734271485943773,1023,49,190,22,20,337,122,249,0.255,0.715,0.028999999999999998,-0.9951,4,1,0,0,1,0,25.0,0,0,0,0,11,18,3,7,7,0,17,10,3,2,4,41,41,21,1,5,9,3,2,0,1,0,5,1,2,0,5,12,2,2,6,0,0,8,8,16,0,0,4,3,34,2,18,36,6,28,2,1,0,0,7,9,1,4,11,116,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242264392977688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611757552415368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926374908802144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17312244911337607,0.0,0.20586926492054555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165076900027667,0.0,0.08987989884606656,0.0,0.123655492030631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425861324950252,0.11683237511975535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518966578495145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21224647427005594,0.0,0.11383997261566076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697315461708667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397748740492411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553175638332687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12989343179322085,0.1205110791869246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373369065597513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223102386424356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651872385802323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344649879103105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3338840236837273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499966494825505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761419497429362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33949905484574106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613621188963677,0.0,0.0,0.33811382320891104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155539477356782,0.2793631500845992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538222660412402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941155644883561,0.12895130033625152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692808653613201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478809841679779,0.14426369295197342,0.0,0.0,0.13128373986151692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250720750603885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928840169990532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mochimochikala,2020/03/16,"I don't know what to do Im 15. I'm in second year of high school, and i always was a golden child in my childhood- talented, mature, calm, understanding. When i was small, my mom kept telling me that my grades were everything, so I've always put school before my social life, to the point that the only people i talk to are my parents. My dad didnt care much, so i've always felt worthless in his eyes- i had nothing to me except my good grades. With my 2nd year of high school i got really busy and i stopped doing most of the things i love (drawing and watching anime), and i tried doing my best at studying, but i immediately fell off the ""best student in class"" status, and my results now are mediocre at best. This took a huge toll on my ego, and ik it's so dumb, but now i feel like everything that made me, me, is gone, and no matter how hard i work everything i do will amount to nothing, so instead of studying i start closing up and playing games to make up for the attention i dont get. I cant talk with other people, I dont have anything to me, i cant focus for a damn minute on my studying 'cause i get something in my head that says that even iif i study it will amount to nothing. Yesterday i had a crisis for my character, and today, while i was having a video lesson, i broke down because i felt like a piece of shit for not studying. My prof called me the moment i finished crying,y mind was blank and i couldnt say anything meaningful. She went on saying how school isnt closed so i have to study nonetheless. My mom overheard and she came and started hitting me. 
I feel like i have nothing to me. I dont know what to do with my life. Please somebody help me.",3.797717391304349,4.293156100574713,4.891329335332333,86.9431259370315,71.32758620689657,7.431484257871064,26.91204397801099,7.255503002510835,1.2096937531234375,1305,41,281,12,23,430,173,348,0.076,0.769,0.155,0.9792,1,0,1,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,0,6,12,17,3,0,12,0,30,6,3,6,0,44,53,23,0,1,4,4,5,3,0,2,2,3,0,1,12,18,0,2,10,3,0,6,11,5,0,1,17,10,59,12,38,32,8,41,0,2,2,1,19,21,3,1,17,187,71,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21396705250018133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107347859946234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052251511173824684,0.0,0.07293776982805711,0.0,0.269860099566096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752534015499686,0.09803595596833227,0.08739289562650181,0.08805366240361417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3013745785728769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056614428823331564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311073034758346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866808933832472,0.12247066400501574,0.16460107855651854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956585842142925,0.0,0.0,0.07189428447354097,0.06855469661053587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678445448908966,0.0,0.0879690641814577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057453444535470015,0.18112674193240647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258769330702947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421424303988987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210871048155414,0.12562912261913195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736178955995196,0.08110629275385714,0.057215912905290885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654844876598937,0.2007784453806059,0.0,0.0,0.06301092141555154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3289862046405672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519067235713293,0.0,0.0,0.09517717029468477,0.0,0.0,0.11884898401347685,0.0,0.0,0.09409012753860233,0.08102906713392391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616797978377971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05491168915064745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044937578165916,0.0,0.34699556467883064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798596128888839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737638853685821,0.0,0.06598815380475481,0.0,0.0,0.12134006451694725,0.0,0.0,0.07166218529111837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779010790756702,0.07491932286830384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05694571982276141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124848606484772,0.0,0.09523332582073726,0.05819535163628348,0.0,0.0,0.08923309401591234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794593370382665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06240206962288199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103962348860217
mentalhealth,For-the-wolf-,2020/03/16,"Diagnosis Just got diagnosed with clinical depression, adjustment disorder, borderline personality disorder, anxiety associated with visual and audible hallucinations, and an unspecified personality disorder. So now I'm probably getting discharged from the army.",18.100588235294122,21.19660964705882,19.151764705882357,-11.967058823529385,40.76470588235296,26.8,72.88235294117645,19.78447435784618,17.543870588235293,224,19,14,17,2,81,29,34,0.325,0.675,0.0,-0.91,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,10,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17411686057588446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19603546856306853,0.2310138309360289,0.0,0.0,0.782563611716073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189139852606398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18203615364093792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974710342941212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24539620460964345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImJustABoiNamedNoah,2020/03/16,"I keep having auditory hallucinations and it's keeping me up at night Im typing this a t 4:28am sorry if the grammar is bad.

Recently I've begun to have auditory hallucinations moatly screeming, blowing, and vocal fry noises if that makes sence. It mostly hapens when i start to fall asleep, I have my cats in my room but no other human and there is no way in hell my cats can make those noises,  i haven't been getting much sleep at night and it's sending me into a tired, depressive, irritated state.

Does anyone know why this could be happening?
(I don't drink or smoke, I'm 13)",4.5975,5.660354434782607,6.125815217391306,76.7469836956522,69.86956521739131,8.532608695652174,26.54891304347826,8.841846274778883,1.9512826086956525,460,14,88,8,8,157,83,115,0.223,0.777,0.0,-0.9791,0,0,2,1,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,3,0,11,4,2,2,0,16,20,9,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,8,5,1,2,1,1,0,2,4,3,0,0,1,0,10,0,8,17,2,17,1,1,0,0,2,7,1,4,6,54,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480163724244751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17674968348339895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16901473025012065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823255798023465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852485951501908,0.0,0.0,0.20737252989558674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059764576367263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18719398859605174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286581312773177,0.0,0.0,0.37631400996596814,0.0,0.0,0.11633756055337795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826052417326245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561419694476875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3973075505891795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20901523325902552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21183973478158072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369661054260843,0.14983304697692382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433029018016258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16802717392610014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19101446271686667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway2910212,2020/03/16,"I love you all (my story) I am a former mixed martial artist and boxer (stopped because of concussions, i loved to brawl and i was short and stocky so i fought the heavy guys) dealing with my concussions and bipolar, anxiety, and anger problems from past trauma and i will tell all of you i promise it will get better. If you are young men, you will grow into men stronger than guys that dont have mental illness cuz youll have survived. You dont knoe how fucking tough you are. Youre a god damn warrior. This is hard. We live with the pain of having enemies and being our own worst enemy and we still keep going. How are we not strong? We will always be resilient and we WILL find the promise land. I been to the mental hospital and ive had many cops called on me. And im telling you, if i can change into someone completely different you can too. I love yall!!!!!!! Always keep trying!!!!!!!!",1.38262711864407,3.8106730677966136,2.5948333333333338,92.22174152542374,83.85875706214689,5.347909604519773,21.84435028248588,6.742157984588678,0.55974824858757,691,23,141,8,20,221,111,177,0.18600000000000005,0.6659999999999999,0.14800000000000002,-0.7715,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,6,11,0,3,5,16,4,0,6,0,24,7,0,3,2,33,33,17,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,4,3,20,0,3,1,1,0,2,3,9,0,0,4,1,31,7,12,21,4,12,0,0,0,4,29,5,2,2,5,98,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23899159153675215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986196614160937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754388820415822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701219459076754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664281322065162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519213187292833,0.0,0.15057332473910529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805655989265284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15004285277880824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33662187397654963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13125778562674306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276598797682318,0.07503078208083458,0.0,0.08161739937898799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843947925890044,0.0,0.0,0.12864718260966815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551244450134087,0.0,0.0,0.2552959810379236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268110796924901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3888434059244634,0.0,0.0,0.1455989394405045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894520737075027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15281215174440246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13709287982021334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374162621434705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216810724862376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468787188194247,0.12006516551686035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25104456036477696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750239262363446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayforventing6,2020/03/16,"Memory loss and overall pretty much fucked up state My memory became very bad. It feel like i'm unreachable anymore. Even if i rest, i still feel tired. Everything is hard and constantly feel like my second breath is about to end. A little more and i'm over. When i live through a moment, i remember it, but when i replay it,it's dull and feels like it has happened, but i wasn't there. Like it's not me. Like i'm above all my life trying to watch it happening. Feels like i'm absent and i subconsciousnally do everything that i do. 

Feels like there's no way I can restore it.

Is in normal? What should I do?

I can't even talk to a psychologist. Last time i told her about it she was pretty negative about it. My parents are the last people who i'd wanna talk with about it. It's just that everything is going okay and i'll ruin everything.",0.4706043089858128,2.8684532254335267,2.5508066211245435,90.78057672096693,89.0,6.151234892275356,17.690225959012086,7.520522993642371,0.5032104046242778,660,17,141,13,22,221,95,173,0.177,0.687,0.136,-0.8119,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,12,13,1,0,4,1,14,4,1,0,1,23,29,11,0,4,5,1,7,7,0,1,2,0,0,0,14,7,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,3,8,19,8,13,25,4,16,0,3,1,1,7,4,1,1,16,89,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213776839593738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441100968545436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219145543092272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014888039585114,0.0,0.0,0.1493669485427743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4064899287288902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34303783003851795,0.4038959181572139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453392038351113,0.0,0.0,0.06426184039003834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19997969017082406,0.0,0.10129095975115003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843387393542376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986661585254233,0.3866913835280912,0.11332858455706026,0.0998452955484046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312146967056193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078727152549972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12555388964724756,0.0,0.0,0.07839039644336271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300712413457506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280893652018695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903000312877886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18176716064519446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593362039518598,0.12996047385086226,0.0,0.10804584278713222,0.0,0.07676896397215907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932968473331974,0.0,0.08975187300092982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tyguythetoker,2020/03/16,"I've been diagnosed with general anxiety, I think it's more than just that because of past trauma The passed 4 or 5 years have been shit, lost 3 of my best friends my senior year of High school, got kicked out of college (selling drugs and robbing[before this I had never been involved in these activities]) and had a family fallout. 

I've been doing great for myself since I've cut off my father but recently I've been struggling like I use to. I generally try to be a really understanding and empathetic person but lately the rage and uncontrollable sadness has been wrecking me. I've never been suicidal but recently I've been having alot more, well let's say twisted thoughts. I know this isn't me and I don't want to become the man my father is. The other day I punched a hole in the wall, I have never felt so low and worthless in my life. 

In addition I feel like I'm going through this constant change of emotions that scale from unrealistically happy to unbearably sad in the matter of seconds. My memory is absolute garbage, I feel like I can't remember anything from my childhood or short term either. It's so frustrating, it makes work so much more difficult. I feel like I've lost my will and there is no coming back from this. Most don't know how intense my issues are so anytime I reach out I feel like they aren't valid because im not a war hero and I pretend to be stronger than mental illness. I know I need to get help again but im just really discouraged right now. Just typing this thread is a challenge it's self because I have to jog my memory every 5 seconds so I've lost my goal with this I guess lol!

How do I find help? What type of mental health expert should I reach out to? Should I try talking about PTSD or is that their job to tell me? I don't want to force my diagnosis. And I don't do well with medication is there an alternative medicine I can try? Marijuana helps the most I've noticed but I don't want to be looked at as a ""self medicator"" just trying to score a med card. I have an amazing gf and we've been together since we were 17 (22 and 23 now), I don't want to give her the life my mother was forced to live. If anyone can relate, help, or just bullshit in the comments please feel free. Anything helps right now 

Anyways y'all have fun❣️",2.195485893416929,4.304649206896556,3.7559169278996873,86.9171394984326,78.48275862068967,6.890595611285268,24.123040752351088,7.924219607001951,1.3062603448275865,1808,63,374,31,44,599,232,464,0.162,0.66,0.17800000000000002,0.9122,1,0,1,0,0,0,39.0,1,1,2,8,23,32,5,2,19,1,48,9,1,4,3,73,78,29,2,8,17,3,6,5,2,3,8,1,0,4,16,20,0,1,14,2,2,4,14,17,2,2,19,8,50,16,44,52,10,40,0,8,1,0,25,17,1,9,24,235,66,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169181609596399,0.0,0.0,0.05638759027462769,0.0,0.13272494066837331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06200963176088114,0.0,0.14747801193877608,0.08906406245388249,0.06862141111865404,0.0,0.08463004778137394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530979724159139,0.06946696358091606,0.0,0.08714663439396007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052008183134569515,0.0,0.0,0.0818511356487408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352049253963704,0.0,0.0,0.09071272929173888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794536180613553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602321812933856,0.0,0.20387808795793247,0.230446031033702,0.07743010451805586,0.0,0.07370641047522286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06230472499098937,0.0,0.04213273594340016,0.0773602917161713,0.04583138068209356,0.0,0.06449772225441093,0.08890939659184742,0.08883756050411222,0.0,0.0,0.08584617040537765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857199350279898,0.0,0.0,0.27026713641953803,0.08520395298640503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742169573302613,0.08417053379354039,0.08002591805546365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13295815707240324,0.0,0.09096902569384177,0.0,0.0,0.0824631208078823,0.11392133349158855,0.19699093469327725,0.0,0.07120941015415483,0.0,0.06771996522534905,0.0,0.26409468934643715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05382995245479464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895763992674488,0.1624790503812179,0.16253872679414513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059282020188098514,0.05979590014322868,0.18659098821057601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181280106999544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769830454247758,0.0,0.07041451893298634,0.0,0.08852200086805162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426756822091577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332417909977896,0.0,0.1592508334195174,0.0,0.09135300860142524,0.13773767939843268,0.0,0.0641306978054089,0.0,0.08161520895246785,0.0,0.0,0.16825685998139514,0.0,0.08277907093276997,0.13341775260246372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430576688609405,0.0,0.08821055590191622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481793770976838,0.07048569852624466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05167289697108099,0.0,0.06402168127126133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21900571729802887,0.0,0.0,0.08395240002937363,0.0,0.06964981983219315,0.0,0.0,0.1902617605520224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501581705205818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05870919942221003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386313480551597
mentalhealth,Stak_Dak,2020/03/16,"Fear of sleeping I hate sleeping. I'm so tired but I just can't do it. I'm afraid, it's so vulnerable, somebody could sneak in and kill me. I'm home alone, usually my girlfriend stays up till I fall asleep (she just dose it naturally). 

How can I get over my fear and/or cope and fall asleep",-0.167336065573771,2.103262983606559,1.5050614754098393,97.85300204918036,91.29508196721312,5.017213114754099,19.100409836065573,6.6274283507984215,-0.054854098360655364,226,7,54,3,8,73,43,61,0.342,0.6579999999999999,0.0,-0.9733,0,1,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,2,3,0,0,4,6,4,1,0,7,9,7,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,8,0,5,8,0,8,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,28,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24460003094336025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18856186168405809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5315119410713877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338864164212225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331681570392276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368969294203521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612861906577032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4726794488262476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25172490750573523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714417142751697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26010697047294473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stellarxrp,2020/03/16,"Any advice? Hi! 

I’ve been struggling with bad mental health since I was a kid. There’s a depression and anxiety history in my family and I’ve seen a couple of therapists but I haven’t been officially diagnosed. Lately things have been going crazy and I’m super overwhelmed so I was thinking about finally seeing a professional and getting the proper diagnose. 

Is it better to see a psychologist or a psychiatrist? I feel like I may need to take meds to normally function but I’m not sure where to go. Is talking therapy better? I’m super confused.",2.3017857142857165,5.205659673076927,4.780219780219781,74.02192307692309,86.88461538461539,8.356043956043958,26.659340659340657,8.841846274778883,3.202249450549451,442,20,72,14,14,154,73,104,0.14400000000000002,0.645,0.21,0.9089,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,4,4,11,0,3,7,0,10,3,0,0,1,16,23,8,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,6,4,6,6,8,16,0,6,0,2,3,0,3,2,0,3,3,44,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17099000232673325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899349391951185,0.0,0.1338604512918307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14610233382165494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30951402536471845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19361382121865175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071140269968966,0.35520529788410954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16495708720295416,0.0,0.08847595869154465,0.12500689582795688,0.0,0.19168379869890476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142066816074906,0.0,0.1988921607329404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18599726695845814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19738687565971105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548717508145064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943651198788808,0.0,0.17634030490542862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297466452620365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17144482387738585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788753735065841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474659447475732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829287694225414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164918094862558,0.0,0.13156439260173092,0.1406435884484037,0.0,0.0,0.20010671872208036,0.2031671337726754,0.11625000523293336,0.11212114905720366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lord_rackleton,2020/03/16,"To me, self care is about getting outside and making the most of fresh air. In many cases, getting outdoors has helped me through many tough moments, and turns out it's a scientifically recognised cause and effect, so I wrote a little article on it. Let me know what your outdoor self care is! I've been on lockdown in Singapore for the last few months and i've been struggling with not being able to get outdoors, there has been a lot of adjustment to keep myself sane. I've been supporting my wife while she undergoes leukaemia treatment and we've been working on our mental health app Bravely (hoping to launch soon!).

Still, I spend many minutes every day imagining my favourite places I've been to, lakes, mountains beaches. It's lessened the struggle a bit and helped cement those memories for me, but man! I miss getting out and about. 

Here's the article if you want to have a read.

[https://medium.com/getbravely/green-spaces-and-head-spaces-2cb772d369d](https://medium.com/getbravely/green-spaces-and-head-spaces-2cb772d369d)

Hope everyone else out there is staying healthy, and your families too. 

Be interested in hearing about what kind of outdoor self care you do?",9.037261287934859,11.482688984455962,6.477620281273129,73.17514248704664,60.709844559585505,8.20858623242043,33.99296817172465,8.634040054169528,2.8466553663952627,966,39,148,13,14,273,121,193,0.034,0.826,0.14,0.9681,0,1,0,0,0,0,50.0,1,4,0,2,10,13,0,2,9,0,16,1,0,4,0,29,34,12,0,4,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,6,12,0,1,4,2,1,0,1,4,0,0,7,1,16,9,25,24,4,20,0,1,0,0,15,12,0,5,7,94,22,2,0.11843150231401665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929652703673186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3622464289650282,0.12166177633524032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637852139880733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893432338490726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978364860836983,0.11316637573157562,0.0,0.0,0.11164668024786874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24750228751631045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430897777268517,0.12588714885307806,0.13348091044730778,0.0,0.1587642791443184,0.0,0.0,0.23525840850916405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052673608555299,0.0,0.12332818492945714,0.06508685642042407,0.09653748122797316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110423509585665,0.0,0.0,0.11869947839066065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068622811677597,0.0,0.0,0.07905394743029309,0.3602128643612906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935109894590505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945308952446087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237357130578072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846355156049793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3706496575932971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623222365394854,0.09457955073218187,0.0,0.0,0.2476206409091932,0.0,0.0,0.13439466534914754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881946605565125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698539685192258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621954419698903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,psychedman,2020/03/16,"Treating my manipulative self. I'm a 21 years old Male and have been reading a lot of books on how to obtain power and how vain and week most people are etc. This has largely changed my worldview and how I deal with people, sometimes manipulating them to do what I want them to do. I'm not feeling good about these traits that I have unknowingly developed during the search of understanding power better. I find that this need to control other people stems from my own weakness. I want to understand this process(conscious as well as unconscious) that takes place within me during manipulation to uncover and transcend the traits I have developed and make sure that they don't obstruct me having healthy relationships with people I care about.",9.530601503759396,9.432870781954886,8.677142857142858,66.69285714285716,59.225563909774436,11.209022556390977,37.045112781954884,10.608840637214634,3.978642105263157,606,24,98,12,7,190,85,133,0.102,0.7829999999999999,0.115,0.1838,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,3,5,6,8,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,8,1,28,21,11,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,10,8,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,1,15,6,17,20,4,6,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,3,3,71,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535688065240133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17703563564047425,0.0,0.18368610729056828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19474991624807453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17901327722132376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19365240288362967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877966506772537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870209589425455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456394167906561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762092020470471,0.0,0.0,0.11590479337391925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875046576585106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822039977885464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4815152371188837,0.0,0.1814148783346408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368510886906938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18642235855013564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811424281515508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17173254052384568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365187310923066,0.0,0.1305542566550693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615268130441184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20483252388397807,0.0,0.13928202611616253,0.0,0.15612152291499734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181725628413224
mentalhealth,cherry-kid,2020/03/16,"freaking out about computer storage petty ramble/vent. no tw’s i think:
hi. i dont know how to start this, but ive got the usual depression and anxiety. im really into open world games, right now im really into skyrim. skyrim ks only like 10 gb. my gaming pc is my baby, though im not the most savvy i try to take care of it as much as i can. it has a 2 tb hard drive. ever since watching that one vsauce video explaining that you cant really delete anything from your computer ive been freaking out about every little thing i download. after playing gta vice city i was very interested in 5. 5 is like 80 gigabytes and im not sure if it would even run on my pc. after about a week of worrying i decided not to try. i dont download any new-graphic overhauls for skyrim because theyre so big. anyways, ive been considering trying hitman 2. seems very interesting. but its 60 gigabytes and again i dont know if itll even run on my pc. ive been really nervous and scared and sad in a way because i want to play it but 60 gb is a lot and what if i dont get that back??? what if it doesnt even run well???? what if... what if.... i run out of space???? 2 tb is a lot but games are getting so large in size... ive been playing only older games because of the file sizes.. ive been putting off continuing my assassins creed game series story thing because of the files.. i use my pc for drawing and a few other things than gaming and i worry ill run out of room for my psd files and/or whatever the heck else. im just so so worried and i know im probably surely overreacting but i love my computer and i want to keep it happy and healthy and safe and... and..

please help with ways to deal with this crisis. if u cant, thats ok too. have a good day",0.5953733517884459,2.4856406900269583,3.1102979529394617,90.62252713630072,82.80053908355795,6.382778465797334,20.80869818605668,7.534196372845213,0.6678801049027467,1340,40,304,22,37,465,192,371,0.138,0.706,0.156,0.8498,0,0,0,0,0,0,57.0,0,2,0,0,20,22,0,2,12,1,29,2,0,2,3,59,46,34,0,10,16,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,22,23,0,2,7,10,0,7,11,6,1,1,7,2,33,16,38,37,5,40,0,2,1,1,13,19,1,11,14,180,55,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056082207771050746,0.0,0.06308907650659445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786551657949996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341409039121998,0.0,0.20109099644103576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408333112576231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05318611855488058,0.08502261485408663,0.07103101120291204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3866153848680544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889283212516784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341132987260326,0.0745985435335974,0.06948425902371781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08617400393045697,0.0,0.0,0.06917165158680616,0.06595853374586941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779050375301464,0.0738766311132422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527768552077345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5344884124982353,0.0,0.0,0.0733028373930925,0.0,0.0,0.13596953169069415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058103610136896,0.08265628103906639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022553899678447,0.07443210253441239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062470103481207,0.0,0.0,0.07964972710310866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05588358687464756,0.1254438098387861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052693920687964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891625932055179,0.0,0.0,0.08290480278353902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21132874513102504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042865280454112,0.0,0.0,0.08256653275296973,0.0,0.0,0.0750772958002555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821976830915015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837246123073811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15545338751955484,0.0,0.0620069329685637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436756495113047,0.0528432384816627,0.08102603807190925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679744899125389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122732138779148,0.09082869702417966,0.13609223945347887,0.09728550338892668,0.13092118052197593,0.0661521996937147,0.0,0.07415014304678692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512558778364326,0.0,0.058584091748968815,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anxiouspanda97,2020/03/16,"Antidepressants How do you know if these even help? I've been on meds for almost a year now and honestly I can't even say if it's helping me or not. These are long term effects type of meds. So yes it's hard to see instant change. But again, how do you know if it even has an affect on you long term. I tell my doc that it's helping me. But if I'm being honest and when I think about it, I'm not even sure how I came to that conclusion.",0.891632653061226,2.003395459183676,2.793622448979594,96.85227040816328,79.10204081632655,6.124489795918367,19.392857142857142,6.6274283507984215,-0.2109836734693875,337,7,87,3,8,113,61,98,0.037000000000000005,0.7959999999999999,0.16699999999999998,0.9147,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,3,0,2,12,3,0,0,2,1,7,0,0,5,1,23,14,14,0,4,9,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,9,3,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,3,10,3,7,11,2,11,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,6,8,57,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18830986918702028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150847658097315,0.0,0.0,0.1989372032169153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4968340868263225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16846029855565026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3781478093669733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20670016628104865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33284542820919544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4177733137506536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495488452003643,0.0,0.0,0.14985544858292782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723956600626115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436831624264436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049801942948456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110122297581352
mentalhealth,shalouise1,2020/03/16,"No sleep, mood all over the place, anxiety through the roof It has been months since I have had more than 3 hours of sleep during the night. I am exhausted everyday and am losing focus at work. I am a student nurse so losing focus isn't an option. I'm scared I'll causing harm to a patient. 
My mood can swing from the happiest to the angriest I've ever been in the space of 2 nano seconds. It's not fair on those on the recieving end of that. It just makes me more upset seeing those I love on the other end of that. 
I haven't had severe anxiety, only quite mild. But lately it's been panic attack galore. I don't really have any reason to though. I have an amazing boyfriend, great family and it's my birthday tomorrow. 
I had a bit of a run in with an ex which was anything but pleasant. He was physically abusive to me in the relationship and tried hitting me again when I bumped into him. 
I've also suffered two family losses (nan and unborn child) since the beginning of the new year. 

Any advice people?",2.247391640866873,4.299997583333337,4.099329205366357,84.79592879256965,78.06862745098039,7.0398348813209495,22.5015479876161,8.032893268588372,1.2734352941176472,793,24,156,14,19,268,127,204,0.179,0.745,0.077,-0.9476,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,5,7,16,1,3,18,0,19,4,2,3,2,16,25,10,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,11,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,10,0,2,8,1,15,4,23,16,4,26,0,4,1,1,6,11,0,1,14,106,26,2,0.0,0.16533788134405092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636165580054513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159400165577817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18979062681514305,0.0,0.2135029245684552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483355811649655,0.0,0.0,0.1587524627638929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234688290170392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433510459851145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471907146836661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262263461037148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26310101457332946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538487387407123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374236118305702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574127190595772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122300853207304,0.0,0.0,0.12594471541531518,0.0,0.093147300612791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138340339437207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347733285952881,0.0,0.13095343038780471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613018034425699,0.0,0.16372586698102462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967428594537413,0.0,0.14579471405772004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484231721419454,0.0,0.0,0.08939603262012281,0.14347539263861658,0.0,0.14981899339395552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397087831234427,0.0,0.11119921391862526,0.0,0.0,0.15764601082563112,0.0,0.2308659573716147,0.0,0.27929134415847434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710215026478784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474182334737696,0.0,0.13631508518737054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159034511333294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986233685085221
mentalhealth,Hitler-com,2020/03/16,What is wrong with me? I feel empty all the time. I feel like a waste of space. I feel like my family feels the same way about me.,-1.888448275862068,-0.01196682758620682,0.2581896551724157,106.12452586206899,96.58620689655173,4.279310344827587,7.25,5.985473137389443,-2.0400413793103445,98,0,27,1,4,32,22,29,0.235,0.612,0.153,-0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,2,3,5,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,16,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960325021483801,0.0,0.6351169234507583,0.4486755287115573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30683110098594496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18310906758880804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492564746338319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34333434992910555,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StoneySchultze,2020/03/16,"This feeling lingers. For the last year or so, I’ve had the feeling that I wanna die but, I don’t wanna kill myself. I’d be completely okay with getting hit by a car, or killed in a shooting. Like I just feel I’d better off dead at this point. I hate my life and don’t wanna be alive. I also don’t wanna kill myself cause I don’t wanna hurt my friends and family. I don’t know what to do anymore",-0.10963383838383578,1.685886193181819,2.436969696969701,95.00601010101013,84.79545454545455,4.8202020202020215,18.868686868686872,5.82211442006289,-0.2967464646464641,307,8,72,2,9,106,55,88,0.327,0.499,0.174,-0.9763,0,0,0,1,0,4,9.0,0,0,0,1,3,9,4,0,4,1,9,1,0,1,0,17,16,7,5,5,4,0,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,1,3,11,4,12,12,0,7,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,2,3,48,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730122294210752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950739221424844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396550155809096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20206547403008412,0.0,0.0,0.20623660620861226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041439396133493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854316125222985,0.0,0.2983728671707944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519702257694735,0.0,0.10276783012091197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19420090239516247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105718252073365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6528594811587037,0.0,0.10810138477249476,0.16033706307434886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893529562308465,0.09609787002255916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859454384257367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266685957429573
mentalhealth,KnightodRaizel,2020/03/16,"How do you cope when you realise human beings are capable of extremely depraved and cruel acts? I don't know if this is the right place for this or not, but here goes. [TRIGGER WARNING: TORTURE]
I found a video series about disturbing things on the internet by Nexpo and it seemed harmless at first, just trolls and other harmless stuff. But a few videos in, it talks about the Adrian Jones case. I looked it up and it made me sick and extremely anxious. The things that poor boy had to endure at the hands of his own parents left me reeling. 
A few weeks prior, an ex-friend of mine sent me a link on deathaddict forum called funkytown. It showed a man being tortured with his face ripped off and hands chopped off, while a man tore into his face with a box cutter. The same feeling of extreme disgust and fear crept into me then. After realising what was happening, I couldn't help but feel extremely scared and pray to whatever is out there to never let this happen to anybody I care about. 
Human beings are capable to extremely sick things and my mind is unable to fathom how one can find pleasure in torturing a living being. 
So back to my question, how do you, in light of such information, go on with your life, knowing that you belong to a species that has committed horrifying acts?",7.659729984301414,7.180636542857148,7.2685714285714305,76.51758241758243,63.163265306122454,9.987441130298274,33.948194662480375,9.265573868473778,2.9369748822605968,1023,37,186,15,13,322,155,245,0.205,0.7020000000000001,0.09300000000000001,-0.9902,2,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,5,0,1,13,12,5,3,16,0,18,7,4,5,2,42,31,21,0,2,7,1,4,0,0,0,3,0,0,5,17,15,0,0,10,3,1,4,4,8,0,2,5,6,20,4,36,20,4,30,1,0,1,0,20,17,0,4,9,141,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19206892781110105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073129288712468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17360465884085524,0.0,0.17334195792310958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913145111845489,0.1719297165503226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15539092979380842,0.14461495122741874,0.0,0.18641303186796526,0.13135342074692313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966236289626201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30068798630486754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395769065449145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18687195607494855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18472215143614132,0.17385219187065884,0.12008685418590075,0.0,0.0,0.15012664953535473,0.0,0.14277005614740654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16087261424457364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17166701545651786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311263021413574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520678635018546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18878190189476704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776298319439587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904560773049871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14519216124735068,0.0,0.0,0.17021500283945332,0.0,0.0,0.15477556937086384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19462687486084226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136651880658656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388518883138448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363760410333657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Summer_Sun_,2020/03/16,"Cancer Survivor Designer - struggling to adjust I am a hodgkins lymphoma survivor - I have been in remission for the last two years. Over the last few years I have learned more about myself than I ever have been for. Cancer gave me a huge wakeup call and now I feel like it has completely whiplashed me out of my 'old' life and I haven't found my way back. It's like, once I was diagnosed all of the cards were thrown up in the air. I was off work, and was able to just focus on getting better, but now what? What I learned - not to sweat the small stuff, work is not the most important thing in the world, your health, laughing, being present, being with friends and family, travelling, experiencing, smiling, BEING, is what is really important. Well I returned to my full time job in the corporate world as a designer - I learned that I was the only one who learned from my sickness, and that the all-nighters, unpaid overtime, and unbalanced work/life balance were still in full effect. A constant internal battle, how will I do well in this kind of atmosphere, if I don't stand for these things anymore, if I am no longer able to 'drink the kool aid'. So much of my self confidence, and self worth was placed on how busy I was, how successful I was, what others thought of my work. So I quit, and decided I would work as a freelance designers, empowering myself with the option to choose my own hours, clients, and the projects I take on. SO much fear. SO much anxiety. SO much sweating 'of the small stuff' that I promised myself I would not do. I am lost, I don't know where I fit in anymore, I don't feel inspired, creative, or confident, ... I don't even know if I want to be a designer anymore. I don't even know what I like anymore. And now with the corona virus, more fear.",4.058267558528428,5.505877017391306,4.4290579710144975,86.94238294314383,71.57971014492753,7.9743589743589745,28.92140468227425,8.502166056373571,1.990832775919733,1381,54,282,23,26,434,170,345,0.114,0.727,0.158,0.9199,2,0,1,0,0,0,57.0,0,1,0,9,21,17,1,3,21,0,36,9,2,4,2,49,48,25,0,6,9,0,2,3,1,3,6,0,0,2,18,14,1,0,16,2,1,1,10,5,2,2,15,3,43,12,38,26,12,44,0,1,0,0,7,25,0,6,19,209,61,11,0.19550288952785733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747795876869353,0.0,0.3877726664362298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516482718687131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645320920679507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981515437069303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249053003591513,0.10563458495284547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921565878364026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095759201504959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12912781470148535,0.08842177816480186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921513624676354,0.2199951037574972,0.09885213514985072,0.06983365167101285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071794137141614,0.07552252374166837,0.0,0.05107109534705538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390521472042258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626548256339736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700322563283316,0.0,0.0,0.10179308732403552,0.16116491286337015,0.1593609483882764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904473629042812,0.1432692548863803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670724919123617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874342373075059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091733109046476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257369771682437,0.10410209841154808,0.06623890879931273,0.07434437859176954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021294544438457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397069396960912,0.0,0.0,0.06262207858456946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039521513734508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806443005916228,0.0,0.0,0.10219103418136267,0.22380403485287967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349692114507267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988343272458933,0.0,0.0,0.07760372820022264,0.0569996535381422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548895769390432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057656334774368274,0.0775905468983751,0.0,0.0,0.17578057663869626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3558210800111415,0.0,0.0,0.13887964346866158,0.0,0.0,0.12589745104192496
mentalhealth,YousifGerges,2020/03/16,"I need help I’m 17 going on 18 y/o, and I feel like I want to and have to see a psychologist, but I don’t know how to ask my mom to take me to one. I have a couple of issues.

1. Sleep: It takes me at least an hour to actually go to sleep, and I’ve been waking up after 6 hours of sleep hot and sweaty for the past week or so, despite the fact that I sleep in an air conditioned room after being awake for 12-17 hours. So, I end up feeling extremely tired, but no matter how tired I am, I always wake up after 6 hours.

2. School work: I’m doing the IB diploma so I have a lot of work during the school closings, and so I have to push myself to work for almost all the time that I’m awake, because I know I won’t be awake for long since I can only get 6 hours of sleep. However, I went from being a week ahead on my work, to now a week behind. I’m so tired and exhausted, and even when I do work and stay up late, I only sleep 6 hours. This makes it so hard for me to work because I just have to exhaust myself even more to get good work, and I’m a bit of a perfectionist so I always feel like I can’t let go of something unless I feel satisfied with it

3. My father: I’ve never had a good relationship with my father, it’s not as bad as other people’s fathers, but we always argue and he’s always rude which makes me talk back, so it makes things harder. He’s always so loud when talking on the phone, this gives me mega headaches with my lack of sleep, so every single day I have to tel him to lower his voice, it’s like dealing with a child. Having to repeat myself over and over, and most of the time I can’t even tell him about it, or when I tell him it doesn’t result in anything, or he does lower his voice but then starts yelling again a few minutes later. Even worse, his phone calls usually last 2-3 hours, and he has several of these calls. 

4. Eating: My appetite is dead. I feel my stomach growl, but I still don’t feel the need to eat, and I don’t know why. I use to always feel dizzy and have severely bad headaches, but I’ve started to drink water and it has kinda helped.

5. Leisure time: Doing things that I usually enjoy doesn’t even interest me anymore. I’m always too worried about schoolwork and the fact that whatever I’m doing is just a waste of time no matter how much work I finish. Typing this post up is making me anxious, because it just feels like procrastination.

6. Pains: it’s probably due to the fact that I spent 90% of my time on a bed in awkward positions, because I don’t leave my room, but I’ve been experiencing subtle pains in my knees and back. Also, I have this weird urge to scratch the inside of my forearms constantly. It feels like hot water is going through them, and it just aches.

I’m always angry and exhausted. I don’t know what to do. I’ve been sad and shitty before, and I always dealt with it well. This is just too much.",2.7715731874145035,3.4492224379084964,4.3829198966408285,88.9889534883721,73.80392156862746,7.0655722754218,22.56589147286821,7.121374137718711,0.5512033287733695,2220,51,505,21,43,748,251,612,0.159,0.753,0.08800000000000001,-0.9938,3,0,2,0,1,0,74.0,1,0,1,9,38,22,2,1,25,0,41,25,12,9,5,83,85,53,1,4,17,4,13,5,0,1,8,4,3,1,30,29,5,0,13,1,1,6,14,12,1,1,6,19,64,10,72,74,11,72,0,1,1,0,32,20,0,7,49,315,94,12,0.0,0.0,0.05019555876678177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05150720427769717,0.0,0.0,0.04113453272368978,0.3852009218115036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058109709257211775,0.05101215670053473,0.0,0.0,0.04232866179215628,0.0,0.04808709855732224,0.0,0.0,0.07910449136220088,0.08589629148540434,0.12542323711378753,0.0,0.0437695053893388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05615640399205808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504683257107736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05558564042312847,0.0,0.0,0.056914591259374224,0.0,0.033172918115340976,0.053029781400507424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04501328379401874,0.0,0.0,0.0503891461725024,0.0,0.10526676313518568,0.0,0.0,0.045558338222836926,0.0,0.0,0.16986984612627526,0.0,0.04333829385426016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23407501045968185,0.1469877787829321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05374791869999695,0.04934351611244155,0.1169324169272536,0.08628663254019132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046077877106750216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895491474881907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.354588883074763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368736335266653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307477122506315,0.041928409992587616,0.058023715855751785,0.054464862416343976,0.0,0.052598306443761414,0.0,0.1256487681781937,0.0,0.0,0.045520549553996266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04373030453444346,0.0,0.0,0.13733966443820336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060242952779240376,0.0,0.0,0.0756249298816449,0.07628047663006868,0.03967175419910469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03485536643309183,0.07824104004815735,0.10946620680937437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04910289320313133,0.035660270793570856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04926288547256665,0.0,0.055458301333260566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05522460163587861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411494808581608,0.040989010483678014,0.0,0.0,0.11621941851442355,0.0,0.04254961349796232,0.0,0.3603223800423079,0.0,0.0,0.039599083717510336,0.0,0.0,0.07281542361848099,0.05482550777495456,0.04107803652603047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734916424958202,0.0826869931021372,0.08991724627117485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834554981754716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499680359054948,0.1773594432577306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442546597067778,0.1133022303854409,0.0,0.030339157334827237,0.0,0.1237801270264669,0.0,0.04624847028447356,0.04768305761100808,0.04641432347740791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29957677391051474,0.05223725593527856,0.05241918470103202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway926363,2020/03/16,"I really don’t know what do I feel like I’m loosing my mind I’m sorry if this doesn’t belong here but the doctors are trying pin it too mental health and I’m in such a fucked situation. 

I am 17 and For a few months now I’ve had multiple range of symptoms which include weight loss, decreased energy, very reduced sexual interest, weakens, constant change in stool including bits of blood in it, reduced appetite sleeping a lot more, intense memory loss (including the date and stuff like table)  and a few more symptoms as well but I don’t want fully get into it.

I have been doctors and hospital so much recently and it always turns out they say it’s nothing but I just feel like something is  wrong it’s making me experience insanity I don’t want die but this shit is masking me so miserable I’m so paranoid all the time and can’t enjoy life like used too I really don’t know what do this shits pushing me to my grave and I generally feel like my end is coming soon okese hell someone.",2.48116371330336,4.6868548894472415,4.267601163713305,83.12079344088865,77.99497487437186,7.405554086220577,26.05157365776249,8.371475516178862,1.9547427135678401,789,31,152,16,19,266,121,199,0.24600000000000002,0.613,0.141,-0.9861,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,2,12,17,4,1,7,0,16,12,4,2,1,30,33,17,2,3,6,0,4,5,0,0,6,2,0,0,13,11,1,0,5,0,0,2,6,9,1,0,2,6,16,8,10,31,8,15,1,4,0,1,2,5,4,2,13,93,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718671267541974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406356526912545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13627213104191913,0.11096511151438564,0.0,0.1392062572645075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369251835725854,0.0,0.0,0.2637009134455098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114094318297228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260085074316143,0.0,0.0,0.1954024209442209,0.27608234418418537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908996224372664,0.06730197350456743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692727678110134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158976647080207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098780789545298,0.3146693033459101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951627033416443,0.0,0.0,0.08598686870778001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981802438442447,0.0,0.13006923638921736,0.0,0.10282112332713576,0.0,0.09469589056254048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236041345347624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16504793739234472,0.0,0.12719201745857112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244106934634384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26445920085200103,0.0,0.14479658243030105,0.12891081106689814,0.0,0.10914688730890833,0.09917022082424114,0.0,0.14420095869803132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746553918147215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677819945790311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511468368016416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745881707481176,0.14011675412541175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112572023625833,0.0,0.10628815972467613,0.15196012887468782,0.0,0.0,0.15686535282299202,0.1158226549789207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408420207205285,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Waazza_,2020/03/16,"I'm lost and unable to find my way out I have so much to say I dont even know where to begin.
I'm a 27 yo guy from Europe and I've been diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety disorder a bit more than 3 years ago. Prior to that I was your random normal guy, had friends, was doing ok at life and then depression happened. Since then, it has been a chaotic mess. The first 2 years were just me falling down the hole and pretending to be fine. And then at some point i started to harm myself. And then I tried. I tried to kill myself. But I dont want to die so I stopped what I was doing. And a year ago I started having those sparks where I could actually do something and push myself and I ended up going back to school and I graduated as a Web dev 9 months ago. And since then... nothing. Before the school I was living with my parents and I then moved out to my own flat in a big city. So during school I was seeing people, I even had a gf and everything was looking better by the day. But since I finished school, my motivation fall back to zero, I live alone in my flat, i never go out, i have no friends, barely no one to talk to and suicidal thoughts are back. I spend my days playing videos game and sleeping. 
The funny part is, I know what I have to do to get better, I know every single steps, but I have no motivation and I feel my depression holding me back.
I feel stuck, no matter how hard it try, I always end up falling back to this point. And I start to be tired of it, i really don't know how much time I'll be able to keep up before doing something stupid and it scares me because, well, i still don't really want to die even tho I feel like I'd be better gone.

My life feels as messy as my text but I'm just putting everything out there, raw, because I never talk about it since I have no one to talk to. 

I had professional help, it didnt help me and was quite expensive so I stopped it and I'm scared to seek any more help. I'm still on medication tho.
My family is of no help, I never ever shared my feelings with my parents, even tho I love them, we are not that close. And when i find someone to talk to, i just feel bad because i end up putting all my negativity on them and just vent how bad my life is and how useless I am. 

This is some piece of text so I really thank you if you made it though and I'll answer any questions you might have.
I just want to get better and get on with my life... so here is my call for help... maybe one of the last...",1.7504306959092732,3.0730151043643303,3.519938219849081,91.65531088654517,77.27324478178369,6.5721548034067325,21.363973346277746,7.215322853602372,0.40828974008208,1908,48,444,22,43,640,225,527,0.177,0.7070000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.9807,2,1,2,0,0,3,60.0,1,4,2,9,39,27,2,2,13,1,45,9,1,7,5,88,83,55,4,6,11,2,7,1,3,1,7,1,0,2,15,36,0,4,17,4,2,11,16,13,1,5,19,10,75,14,57,58,12,75,0,5,2,1,29,22,0,6,42,306,90,8,0.0612727732094583,0.0,0.05979338794863535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16294384938780204,0.0,0.0,0.0634601141434517,0.0,0.0,0.05098385576979135,0.0,0.0,0.08333517383070854,0.0,0.046873503794280236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355749022774951,0.10232041252890182,0.11205394150549862,0.0,0.10427723409651823,0.0,0.0,0.21676315449866532,0.06689399883560064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06256635215359391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04892132359681905,0.0,0.0,0.07903173950009074,0.0,0.15832244934429698,0.06219057502585665,0.12718292973621065,0.0,0.0702239065221607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14362246773136425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16280847102289658,0.0,0.0,0.1618803553102406,0.05542473130042349,0.05162495410200765,0.0,0.1101360353388741,0.0,0.05776251744470974,0.0,0.18588813105325888,0.04377328142371599,0.0,0.0,0.11200440932712827,0.05211858959075453,0.0,0.0,0.09467838517588363,0.0,0.09603748518446896,0.0,0.06964545809309575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133935753808965,0.05418331099268293,0.0,0.05488836959649016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053492415383645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05446205614243666,0.06778924523965042,0.0,0.1346956549378576,0.04994548813380939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731150870760891,0.02993478198281872,0.0,0.1082099626263913,0.0,0.05145369755367913,0.0,0.06688647001882933,0.0,0.0553010700703212,0.0579777795244661,0.0,0.0,0.06155673630937605,0.0,0.0,0.06172587278585012,0.0,0.06500072951917593,0.0,0.0,0.048907342999434805,0.06512326105224092,0.09008507688919297,0.0,0.1417720201373538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06003430830370129,0.05879287843030712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456005063569033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607232701054192,0.06635244239768298,0.0,0.04247882598180069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11584515158696827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231921214580492,0.06863952892750158,0.06517113652299349,0.0,0.0,0.11775872249101847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048726568565199614,0.12268947020875652,0.24804527074084665,0.0488264672352481,0.0,0.0,0.06922079312519304,0.0,0.2027418846969253,0.0,0.06131702367348325,0.0,0.05191622190270947,0.09434154866699143,0.0,0.0,0.13010755274066266,0.0,0.0978650316686824,0.1024535640325469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06702246891763237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969949365374586,0.0,0.05641173731456608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020018857943096,0.04864373769312645,0.035728646801024715,0.07042403921520875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480057287626788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842080748525464,0.04863547536083397,0.0,0.0,0.055091581679543054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183729711203306
mentalhealth,qxlq,2020/03/16,How do I stop overthinking? Everything that happens to me I overthink and start to hate myself. I start to feel like no one cares about me and I refuse to talk about it to anyone. Is there a way to stop the overthinking before it starts to effect me?,2.127400000000001,4.40708094,2.9419999999999997,91.781,79.6,6.4,20.0,7.554174236665415,0.5736000000000008,197,5,41,3,5,62,33,50,0.228,0.674,0.098,-0.7476,0,2,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,8,9,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,8,2,9,9,0,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,30,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18137674978955307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22072815053908326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644730194982262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331297295971192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115916025855592,0.18531361203425412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229384335499904,0.0,0.0,0.25610130895403843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672850639176794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17577444617439905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5508086158294371,0.0,0.0,0.4337358178125421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084938691758471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20589764621201198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,merumclovin,2020/03/16,"I don’t know where else to go I’m at a breaking point. I know I probably shouldn’t be turning to reddit for mental help, but I just don’t know where else to go or what to do. I have a lot going on but I’ll try to keep it short. 

I’m 20F. Struggled with depression quite seriously throughout high school. Saw a therapist for 5 years. Just stopped seeing her last summer. Recently I’ve been mentally in pieces. Anxiety through the fucking roof. I can’t sleep, every time I close my eyes my brain goes wild with FEAR. I feel that I am terribly annoying, I’m convinced that my coworkers and friends (barely even my friends anymore) can’t stand my company. I regret every single time I open my mouth. I feel embarrassed and hateful of myself. These thoughts swirl in my head, make my heart race and jolt me awake and into tears. I hate sleeping. I hate the nighttime. I fear it every night. My mom was so proud of me to know I stopped seeing my therapist last year. I cannot bear to break her heart and tell her I’m struggling again. My mom is one of the most important people in the world to me. I could not do that to her. 

My family is hard as well. I have a family member with anger issues, I won’t get too into it because they are a Redditor and may see this, but it’s very anxiety inducing to come home every day never knowing who will be upset, who will be arguing with who. My boyfriend and I are planning on moving out, which I am DYING to do, but it will not be until next year due to his financial situation. 

Every single day I just want to vomit 24/7. I’m never calm. There’s always a low, upsetting, terrifying, rage inducing buzzing in my head of just evil thoughts. I can keep it together on the outside quite well. I don’t think anybody has truly caught on to how much I’ve been struggling. I don’t want them to. I don’t want to scare my boyfriend away, if I explained this to him he would just tell me to see a therapist. And he’s right, I should, but I cannot break my families heart. I cannot bring this attention and guilt and pity onto myself. It feels terribly selfish, and with my mother already dealing with her own issues, I cannot put this on her. I’ll never forget her face when she first found out I was suicidal in high school, and I can not do that to her again. 

I don’t have any other close friends. I have coworkers I talk to, but it’s casual and work exclusive. I had a close knit group of friends, but over the past year I have been particularly excluded as I am the only female, I have a different work schedule than everybody else, and again, I’m probably annoying as fuck and I’m really not surprised they don’t want to see me anymore. I’m terrified to get close to anybody when my mental state is this bad. I’m so scared of being too annoying, scaring them away. I open up to people very easily and I know I wouldn’t be able to keep it together. 

It’s getting worse every day and I don’t know what to do. I am not suicidal, but I do not feel good about myself at all. Anxiety is my main issue, I have nightmares almost every night as well. Never consistent, always something wildly different but equally as disturbing. 

I don’t know who to turn to. I don’t feel like I can express this to anybody without seriously deterring things and upsetting them. I want to be able to handle this all by myself so badly but it’s becoming more and more difficult each day. Last night was the first night in years that I legitimately could not get a wink of rest. Usually I use CBD and THC to calm myself down and knock myself out, but it’s not working anymore these days and I’m scared, I feel trapped and deteriorating. I don’t know. I’m probably just yelling into the void with this, but I just thought I’d give it a go. I don’t know what else to do with all these thoughts and I needed to get them out. If anybody who sees this has any ideas, I would love to hear them.",2.412529942575884,4.203954405031451,3.9985726004922064,86.9162838392125,76.64779874213836,7.577249111293411,24.85507246376812,8.411683812788059,1.5720133989608969,3052,106,643,59,69,1017,303,795,0.24600000000000002,0.677,0.076,-0.9995,2,1,1,0,1,0,88.0,0,0,7,9,26,55,12,15,20,0,73,15,11,5,7,139,147,51,3,16,31,3,7,1,4,10,1,2,1,0,41,47,0,5,27,1,0,9,34,39,3,3,14,17,108,16,89,114,16,95,0,4,8,3,44,41,2,7,41,426,149,5,0.09439103365290816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0472594927234128,0.0,0.052081426408863034,0.0,0.07854090150727057,0.0,0.0,0.06418913969044182,0.0,0.10831332357728143,0.0,0.1404158126344903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868348327972979,0.0,0.07881257038406866,0.028769949004456667,0.05212374037137854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05268580527286165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0406547587693361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536355970353477,0.0,0.0,0.15218601982685762,0.0486565054998846,0.040649429486356636,0.0,0.04898149525470224,0.09861854005987533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15770319324822488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031172193752352806,0.0,0.2783498091656612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133475198911643,0.10621615512895036,0.14318082824441075,0.033716486650928953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028896500548179,0.0,0.05174744818976616,0.1458525569063082,0.0872629896152609,0.1232885480935024,0.04527424024202527,0.1072891993343437,0.03958536033790031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04227791293226312,0.13978740584428576,0.09687243234175193,0.0,0.05319277752909785,0.16778074403070567,0.03163416008997432,0.09972930948165884,0.04734095146416392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05327799383901451,0.0,0.14777957335979094,0.0,0.12584863157508686,0.0,0.0,0.2593742177842465,0.11541193594584015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02305734558376855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040123940678198175,0.04259579657187569,0.0,0.031503373960852316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268594137112253,0.0,0.0,0.11054963780048127,0.0,0.05016136534701773,0.034694135253209184,0.03499487771459341,0.1456003683515344,0.0,0.05019296756639865,0.17715918171854975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031980903631181064,0.035894317257957165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04505346109489232,0.06543885779541048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044615018340168094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265424856966672,0.0,0.0,0.047444529899802614,0.0,0.10039648311185906,0.0,0.0,0.03023465658930272,0.0,0.04659987915654936,0.0,0.0,0.04030471349786894,0.0,0.0,0.1890037826710372,0.09552876535352332,0.2256522989191303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05304973832757357,0.09445920172855013,0.0,0.0,0.036333414617337946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789151306845347,0.0,0.14801700429697287,0.0,0.10324847053158473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03793396869070029,0.08250192386586065,0.0,0.0,0.16439289788896436,0.03135460426919938,0.030240981510946213,0.0,0.14987187427927184,0.05504017079559583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032042657930073916,0.1026703395467233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040761773332833984,0.05197919405194499,0.0778824881923933,0.13918569308959666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730331274208526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04549479404475629,0.0,0.10307669503665327,0.0,0.04809626367196048,0.06705268209596672,0.0,0.0,0.15196182735217825
mentalhealth,ghettoplantsis,2020/03/16,Accidental overdose? So I woke up today feeling so bad about myself I started crying and thinking about how everything is going wrong in my life also my boyfriend has been in jail for 5 months now so I wanted to block out the pain so I took 5 codiene pills which is 160mg of codiene and 1500mg of paracetamol is this going to cause me to overdose?,2.27542857142857,4.591876257142856,3.9871428571428567,84.28785714285716,79.28571428571428,6.857142857142858,25.714285714285715,7.957251820313856,1.7414285714285715,278,11,53,5,7,93,50,70,0.25,0.73,0.02,-0.9539,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,2,0,9,13,8,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,3,1,8,0,12,10,0,11,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,4,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22343631861416505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332875795748973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870210720035185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30690810944012353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25110697340986426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127318649758475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31757925804558185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19734869442825465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22301465347502733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973016179184337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19776097009453186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902843026888365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26483881456404196,0.0,0.31042401328222824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647975356930631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054803665758225,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bspencer741,2020/03/16,"i can’t help but feel completely alone i (16) don’t form real human connection anymore. i just feel like a burden most of the time, and it hurts me when other people don’t notice a mental health switch. some days i’ll just lock myself in a room for days at a time and stop trying, and my parents don’t notice. i feel unfair for saying this, because i can’t expect people to analyze my mental health, but i’m not a person that can just tell people that i’m struggling. i stopped taking my zoloft and i don’t know why, i just don’t feel like it’s worth it. my parents can’t afford to send me to therapy anymore and i haven’t been for months, and i feel like i don’t have anyone to talk to. every time i try to talk to my parents the words don’t come out and i just feel like a burden. i try to bring it up to my friends when i’m feeling down, but they just don’t seem to take notice. i can’t hold this against them, because they have their own struggles and i’m not able to be the most emotionally available friend for them so i can’t expect it back. now that my spring break has been expanded due to corona, i find myself laying in bed, watching tv or sometimes just staring at the ceiling. every time i text my friends i immediately feel like i’m annoying and distance myself. the worst part is i just give into the depression. i stopped trying to be happy, and i’d rather just lie around and feel sorry for myself. i don’t feel like a normal person and it’s suffocating me.",3.9749032258064494,4.3302968451612935,5.147903225806452,85.76185483870971,70.87096774193549,7.490322580645162,25.5,7.1686216300943375,1.021793548387096,1162,31,248,10,20,386,136,310,0.152,0.713,0.135,-0.7646,4,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,5,0,16,18,1,2,13,0,24,3,0,0,0,57,46,19,0,4,16,3,10,6,3,0,3,1,2,3,12,16,0,4,13,1,1,3,17,8,0,0,2,13,42,10,29,42,7,30,0,2,2,0,21,10,0,5,22,160,54,0,0.07953204895270942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237121710401771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774884332404934,0.05561065783997992,0.0,0.0,0.070800385341466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061155236424230784,0.0,0.09696399770356387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850981792387255,0.08338784016636293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258318410449774,0.0,0.0685008372235157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946285035066473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340183628636041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4021379362118086,0.34090626997842244,0.0,0.0,0.07269085189822458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18433879119925736,0.0,0.0,0.0762943883942634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466334500260017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690776979009084,0.0,0.0,0.05330865594936028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514070332483702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0437087341616411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331320507959693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16029919841356194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348172269404596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792452172076632,0.0,0.2716432946025926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26493278513565705,0.08612545867419226,0.0,0.16541252617484062,0.1388886349027422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052488348957767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06324707750989796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240299035168743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865923004345557,0.08902961741780653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994770624016312,0.0,0.1662883316490737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959640585364205,0.12784969665543527,0.0695145163016252,0.0,0.0909518292642186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18550310929648128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159881624723406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176530376094267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Plantbabybabe,2020/03/16,"Crying a lot 
My cat has been missing for four days now. She’s not even a year old yet. I think my roommates or their friends let her out based on how they acted when I brought it up. But they won’t say anything. 

I can’t stop crying :( 

I miss her so much. She’s slept next to me every night and it’s so hard. I’m so sad. I just want my kitty :,(

I can’t stop thinking of the worst possible things that could happen to her. She’s still a baby. She’s so tiny and has never been outside. It’s freezing out too. And snowy. I’ve been walking around and driving around trying to find her since she disappeared. Nothing. 

My heart aches. I feel like I’ll never see her again. I just want to hug her",-0.636546941678521,1.496780871621624,1.0816785206258892,101.181386913229,91.63513513513512,3.656330014224752,16.57325746799431,4.9825596385082,-0.9778702702702704,531,13,127,2,19,171,94,148,0.196,0.715,0.08900000000000001,-0.937,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,3,0,16,7,0,0,4,0,10,3,2,1,2,26,22,12,0,3,5,0,3,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,5,8,0,2,4,0,0,5,6,4,0,1,5,5,27,3,12,14,3,25,0,3,1,1,16,6,0,2,15,85,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710010086962252,0.2966240429805573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301896544111874,0.0,0.3660112179075262,0.10744517372377092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003973219363718,0.0,0.14037024104639742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842394994742653,0.11902124024551627,0.0,0.0,0.15227215412572095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287170902153461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732651209154368,0.0,0.14924359362487927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19742539656831745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17036288920306206,0.0,0.08139382660363871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14163994109170006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247239903238474,0.0,0.2569890599933872,0.0,0.17718421593583045,0.1563456607098892,0.0,0.15986010371586573,0.0,0.1748218577533259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878198874281477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248941899969433,0.0,0.0,0.1327610473360065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378157507359487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13304939756655426,0.2785751915806902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068365236757698,0.21350499314704705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311252346914233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19653357109791453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728689112056668
mentalhealth,redrobe07,2020/03/16,"Time doesn't feel connected and I don't know how to deal with it I've noticed that most of the time, my days don't feel connected. This morning feels like it happened days ago, and yesterday feels like it was last week. It's like anytime there's a change in my location or who I'm with, it's logged as a completely separate and independent time in my head. For example, if I work early in the morning, then go to school, then come home and hang out with my roommates, I'll have trouble remembering things about the earlier parts of my day right away and they don't seem like they only happened hours ago. 

I've tried googling to see if other people experience this and how they deal with it, but I mostly get articles about dissociation. But I don't think that I don't feel real or something. It's more like time doesn't really exist or it has no meaning except for the here and now. 

Does anyone else experience this and have tips for how to handle it? Does it have a name that I just can't find? I think it effects other part of my life like struggling with schoolwork and deadlines so I'm trying to get a handle on it but I'm not able to see a professional right now.",5.4333293484757945,5.345804828451887,6.126434548714883,81.54515690376572,67.66108786610879,9.506395696353856,29.623729826658696,9.23628265651192,2.2211001793185883,930,30,196,16,14,305,119,239,0.038,0.9,0.062,0.5439,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,3,2,11,8,0,1,9,0,13,2,1,5,0,48,34,24,0,2,11,0,5,6,0,0,1,0,1,0,22,16,0,0,13,0,0,3,10,2,0,0,1,7,16,6,27,33,5,29,0,0,2,0,7,8,0,8,24,122,38,3,0.10991982217573053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19487458035245192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685849542843624,0.11262584754265186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327329127338074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162805970136302,0.09468619383817847,0.1152488422391209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21266757559002525,0.2266450201999663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19238315424518374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918239068243092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150453560961384,0.0,0.0,0.27789382406582264,0.1570534858507217,0.0,0.0,0.10046472610313664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485714062693075,0.0,0.06246996804576373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944034714684221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280944942176495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025854395674292,0.0,0.10824888318105153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060409059616088175,0.08959932587645518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763962111805665,0.3222076371022919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973491044944246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12514444609074518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359897794153134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380649116156821,0.0,0.07620456450031493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511282214758174,0.07041745274368105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451773093637312,0.1877418550927384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11124472838107173,0.1751837338134104,0.10006687780898027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846216493075098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491206429016805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07302584561864497,0.14086436736463676,0.0,0.0,0.2563805290498513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925668786138865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817105108790672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002293968269554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymybitchi,2020/03/16,"Why do I always confuse other peoples stories as my own memories Maybe this is normal but I still wonder. I'll often catch myself telling someone a story then halfway through catch myself and start to realize that what I'm saying may not have happened. And not in a compulsive liar kind of way, I only lie when I need to and I never consciously make up any scenarios or stories. 

It's just confusing because I really will think it's my memory and I slowly start to realize that it's probably something that someone has told me.",5.480714285714285,6.668075558823537,6.751680672268907,72.60970588235296,67.92156862745098,9.75014005602241,34.179271708683466,9.957137785484203,3.757421288515406,425,20,70,10,7,144,74,102,0.040999999999999995,0.92,0.038,0.1909,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,2,2,0,6,0,0,1,1,22,15,9,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,9,4,0,0,5,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,1,1,12,1,8,12,1,11,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,6,6,52,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18144293364156447,0.0,0.0,0.14828790591719673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292701886299582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19282925452552246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22707536486609425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555637843131153,0.0,0.21907003016416066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616883217052418,0.16818089343263565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21365196596644687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16584404047722565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15117496877029496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351049721591233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13969446960576373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734096296419214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36952213454186944,0.16787282067993156,0.0,0.0,0.3086872069828549,0.0,0.1741425611969071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905935736669516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13972369291020825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208365152495512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17308544430942044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19676473975224373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364761754633093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bruetus,2020/03/16,"How to deal with this ? so ive dealt with adhd and depression my whole life, its been a really rough road with a lot of mistakes made along the way, but after 25 years on this earth, in 2019 i really started to get myself together, most of it work on the mental side, but some in life in general. 

​

That leads me to now, the last 2 months have been stress filled as a tired to find a better job and work my way out of the nasty situation i was stuck in, i was right there, an interview lined up, and some things seemed to be going the right way, and yesterday i was told the company i applie ot has put on a hiring freeze, and found out a few hours ago my mom (who has supported me through all of this) has also been laid off.  


i am at a total loss at how to deal with this, im going to be looking for a job tomorrow but it all seems so... pointless.

This virus has paralyzed any chance i had at finding even basic work, and now im sitting here, after trying to help the person who has been solid for me through this all (my mother) while also wonder how im simply going to survive the next month or so.   


has anyone been through this ? does anyone have any ideas of what to do ? or is this the end of the line ?",6.555421607378129,4.57221191699605,7.044357707509885,82.10972496706194,66.19367588932806,10.33056653491436,29.38372859025033,8.841846274778883,1.9302519104084328,937,21,210,12,12,309,139,253,0.08900000000000001,0.8490000000000001,0.062,-0.8364,2,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,7,13,6,0,1,19,0,23,3,0,5,4,40,37,21,0,1,5,2,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,16,13,0,0,7,0,0,6,0,4,0,0,13,3,16,2,43,22,10,44,0,2,1,0,10,18,0,9,16,151,32,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898435147063192,0.0,0.0951375483659395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716562698913104,0.0,0.11628709562132285,0.13041218636127253,0.14596999200688804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15008892002089574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492065137415756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22129568189114854,0.09243926505049556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392123697554833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09505850539630742,0.0,0.0,0.07088745689398386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961870598293816,0.0,0.0,0.11767683186072975,0.0,0.0,0.05607312534967393,0.0,0.18298660386460505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193799633002032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569396316923638,0.0,0.0,0.1211573853821571,0.3477897554365482,0.0,0.21300792525673407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874845778624362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516142987119848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012635931969132,0.0,0.0,0.09124427166849168,0.0,0.1015539492478368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815882469569564,0.0,0.0,0.12569828653197784,0.1713323231606423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414184875825945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371245560389056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789173501379694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375108811850519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833107200220008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954101434915164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063831852222966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596551596236832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12294095662697772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179166491063015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130226945907626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335483288508775,0.0,0.10255408037546744,0.0,0.0728669451637597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555698736800165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982504796676052,0.0,0.0,0.1163898877278422,0.23440264853459586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041218636127253,0.06911408014166788
mentalhealth,jdors45,2020/03/16,"Worried about my cousin (advice) Hi all,

My first time posting and I’m also not sure if this is a normal kind of post, (I’m so sorry if not!) but I’m getting worried for my cousin. She’s 21 and has in the past couple months started exhibiting signs close to schizophrenia. She hears voices of people she knows I.e friends and family. She is also very spiritual (believes in clairvoyance; things of that nature) so her idea for this all is it’s telepathy. She’s even said she talks to me and often asked me what color she telepathically sent me (I never know). The part that worries me the most though is that she has recently remembered a trauma with her father and the voices have told her to block him and she’s completely changed her opinion about him and wants nothing to do with him. I’m afraid this is a delusion. Her accusation came out of nowhere and it seems heavily influenced by what the voices are telling her. Im really not sure what to do, I don’t want to go to her parents just yet without more Clarity but I also don’t want to shut her down completely by not believing her abuse! She’ll sit next to me and just laugh to herself and shush herself. I don’t know guys. Anything really helps. Again, sorry if this isn’t the normal content.",3.0999116672800864,5.17851596761134,4.076085756348913,85.83607931542142,75.5587044534413,7.082002208317999,25.397313213102684,8.00094639256281,1.5251554655870447,992,35,194,16,22,320,131,247,0.113,0.809,0.078,-0.7194,1,0,0,0,1,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,14,7,0,1,9,0,16,0,0,1,5,49,36,21,0,8,12,4,0,0,1,1,0,5,0,1,13,15,0,1,6,0,0,3,10,2,0,1,4,6,36,5,27,31,5,22,0,0,1,0,39,6,0,7,10,138,49,0,0.0,0.13055723246121712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767647589545468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26435691380005283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067705125703532,0.0,0.10301285502704983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482929846682412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260281024133873,0.0,0.0,0.116566499382077,0.0,0.2310644156062744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192323334577572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07277951199993417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387740559271476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372763011967536,0.0,0.0,0.08513258643195858,0.0,0.05756977155159808,0.0,0.06262356471003773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10910550833772537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241922343112796,0.0,0.07385809135432922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439119372682288,0.11902420065232835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474601715419215,0.18167276720083875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795267467483968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849853866543762,0.0,0.11718840561342578,0.0,0.2159257757112459,0.10573035852383067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223530494178032,0.11932512424876345,0.10518890452317922,0.0763919308024895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21106328440050745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14118118022341372,0.0,0.10879941563347888,0.0,0.12482388617725272,0.0,0.10481600423280314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003129150508196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466975578124379,0.07799310939921156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20770570237504715,0.0,0.0,0.08856661650005203,0.09631099122691453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732053963154629,0.0,0.10826119917313602,0.0,0.06425272476362277,0.0,0.0,0.10529134843264484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091836027028403,0.194978901406364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621930992152134,0.0,0.0,0.3357101406060419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shmikal,2020/03/16,"february 25th my mental health had been slowly improving ever since i met my gf almost 3 years ago. but recently, since around february 25th, i can slowly feel my mental health slipping again and idk what's wrong with me, nothing has changed. my gf and i are having a talk this Tuesday (she hasn't said about what) and im concerned that if my feelings and thoughts do not clear i may find myself alone in this world once again: she has mentioned recently that she notices I've been regressing to that older self and i dont know how to stop that. I've contemplated hurting myself again but i dont know how i can hide my bad habits again as im not that young anymore and hoodies 24/7 would be very obvious to my gf. any advice is welcome, but i dont want a therapist again, they're fucking useless",4.607650085763293,5.634701062893085,5.0384676958261885,84.68439108061753,69.81761006289308,8.045969125214409,29.54888507718697,8.296473431620573,2.003498113207548,635,24,126,9,11,202,96,159,0.184,0.78,0.037000000000000005,-0.9711,0,1,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,0,10,6,1,0,2,0,18,3,0,2,3,30,27,13,0,3,6,0,2,0,3,2,2,1,0,1,9,8,0,1,6,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,6,3,21,1,8,18,0,17,0,2,0,1,12,3,1,3,14,78,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851674613997255,0.11658175446465822,0.0,0.13169513020448625,0.13621179577812725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943596960213246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042937804328705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707788191312392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981107837133204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912739142815905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46241031491574897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896452256428655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13299774452221538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020402055241836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158521089797072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27959252839534776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14079151069291598,0.0,0.2841215382011615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445564453376401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26507610844371754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619396699877528,0.1497328082542126,0.0,0.1400611556622154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25971405105644635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510264377961575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13720075991278866,0.0,0.0,0.21758419888423586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995397762125347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570826426623392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527012024080578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104409690306626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851517686800424,0.07757204708613047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342579861012393,0.14379303234268925,0.0,0.08469254105786171
mentalhealth,-SecondHandSmoke-,2020/03/16,"Does anyone else cherish silence? I genuinely enjoy sitting in silence, but this week is testing me. My nerves are at an all time high. My aunt is getting open heart surgery Thursday, so my family came to our home state to be with her from Saturday to Saturday. My family is chaotic in times of crisis, it doesn't bring them together. So surrounding all of this my 4 aunts and grandmother have tried to drag me into their drama, I'm 18 I don't have any business being apart of their catty little fights they know all it does is stress me out. I can't handle my stress around them, they know exactly how to push my buttons and just go through me. I nearly saw red today because of the fucking noise. At my home, it's just me and my parents and my dog, the house is fairly quite even when all 4 of us are there. I stay in my room, I come out whenever everyone is home to visit. I get time alone to deflate. Here I have absolutely no privacy. My grandparents live next door to our second house here so they just come in and out all day, they slam the fuck out of the front door and won't wear hearing aids so they scream talk, I love my grandparents but they are going through me. I've been here since 8 last night and I already had an hour long panic attack, and then about lost my shit tonight. My aunt had some brain damage from her strokes, she is aware and capable but some things just don't click. She's grabbed at my nose ring 10+ times since last night telling me to take it out. She is sick. There is a pandemic going around. Don't touch my fucking face PLEASE. No matter how many times I've told her to stop she either forgets or thinks it's funny. I'm not entirely sure if her hearing has been effected but she has the TVs at full volume 24/7 she sleeps with it going and sometimes has 2 at the same time. I'm telling you I am going to fucking lose it. I cannot express how much I value silence at this point. I just want to sleep on the lawn to have some silence. So when I need alone time, I lock myself in my room. My mom has now figured out she can pick the locks with her fingers and just barges In, locked or not. I've brought dabs with me to help with my stress but she has the nose of a bloodhound and is waiting to catch me, she almost did this morning. I seriously can't be around my family sober right now it is driving me up the wall. I need silence. Even a solid 5 minutes of silence I just need it. I feel like I'm legitimately having just a multiple day long panic attack, this shit is stressing me out so fucking much. I love my aunt, I love my family, but they are driving me insane, literally.",2.2719838345417784,4.066928292364992,3.3907246721343967,91.10288957565672,77.06331471135941,6.4324101588810985,23.716034708189703,7.295548434001253,0.8326673719244022,2051,66,443,25,47,661,245,537,0.182,0.7390000000000001,0.079,-0.9964,3,2,0,0,1,0,53.0,3,1,11,4,33,28,10,6,16,0,44,21,11,5,7,82,83,33,0,5,20,6,5,1,0,1,2,4,8,0,15,32,0,2,6,1,0,16,12,21,0,1,10,14,87,7,59,69,13,85,0,3,3,8,48,37,7,7,30,289,102,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06917906233083122,0.14310330679195485,0.07623747180071619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04698045027266682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048306127489458416,0.07078617034689902,0.0,0.18450199512738985,0.0,0.15718926287770454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042113826889388965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712216947084763,0.0,0.07901530856880468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902193311336545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910875292800244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091422196060375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05771199819758791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126052821614104,0.0,0.0,0.06601407326392633,0.0,0.0,0.2605103179071068,0.0,0.03493166088934427,0.049354633263884416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193417581256717,0.07218855439819602,0.0,0.19631416305116536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572856415415892,0.0818665477229668,0.046306496463167965,0.07299253249733377,0.2078949080964924,0.0,0.06803521617729585,0.15943058336715585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593507312539441,0.11262766554642235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033751643435072684,0.06924173379429488,0.061003685892630576,0.12227683405030615,0.0,0.07728890642912774,0.07541488987632952,0.0,0.1870568490857301,0.0,0.0,0.0700417659834394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091200141322676,0.0,0.0,0.10157145609847017,0.1536778763694811,0.0,0.0,0.07347312109689809,0.12966396133696775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16211369509924745,0.07671117607063939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583503814806858,0.0653080462100818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07348084123161525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0589985657191375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14183036850704334,0.11429633604101005,0.0,0.13827061247448874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832724053787556,0.0,0.0,0.07363585876714611,0.0,0.05775849919106879,0.3165484313523983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511218470477148,0.0,0.05194363322468773,0.05552823852486432,0.12076739305968814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04589727900365099,0.04426714347390456,0.0,0.0,0.2819898215916789,0.0,0.06548489412635429,0.06601407326392633,0.0,0.04690446093366386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083101246271453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040748366869519895,0.0,0.05541615160418748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aglaesia,2020/03/16,"Help please (I have PTSD and Clinical Depression)
Im depressed because I have a crush on a married man??¿¿¿ Im talkin like high school giddy type shit (which I havent felt in a long time) please help, I want to ""steal"" him for myself lile the selfish affectionate I am but this is such an asshole thing of me to feel and be like what the hell is wrong with me man fuck",0.3927485380116984,2.66751394736842,1.6770175438596482,98.07967836257308,87.15789473684212,4.956725146198831,18.970760233918128,6.42735559955562,-0.17374678362573093,284,8,66,3,9,90,56,76,0.276,0.556,0.168,-0.9282,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,1,11,3,0,6,0,7,3,1,0,0,7,11,3,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,0,0,1,2,9,3,7,9,0,5,1,2,0,1,4,3,3,0,4,37,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003926071947595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3392100183045056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995675543776534,0.14067811281169235,0.18907196499850615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820473293151228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639796956257262,0.2080544630160396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4254100218967451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19240817685149889,0.0,0.0,0.17426605282236993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4323132134173756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23018636575652646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929132249599885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20213328781391293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308234337170143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482435042122505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614721804765735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21529869725748488,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ihavebraindamage123,2020/03/16,"Will cognitive impairment from drug use ever go away? I used synthetic cannabis for a while and experienced warning signs of schizophrenia as a result. My cognition also suddenly declined. It's been three years since I've used any drugs and the schizophrenic signs have completely disappeared but my cognition hasn't healed. I have serious issues with short and long term memory loss and not being able to hold information in my head. According to most sources I've read, cognitive decline from schizophrenia is permanent. Here's the thing though: I spoke with a psychiatrist recently and she said it was most likely BLIP (brief limited  intermittent psychosis), not schizophrenia. Is there any hope my brain can recover, or am I in the same boat as people with schizophrenia, considering the symptoms were so similar? Personally, I predict my chances of recovery are very low. But I need a tiny amount of hope to get through life with this terrible problem. However, I would rather hear the truth, even if it's that there is no hope.",8.705651515151516,9.797723272222225,7.705151515151518,68.96590909090912,60.722222222222214,12.545454545454547,39.141414141414145,12.079253325248375,5.2652777777777775,839,41,135,27,11,258,125,180,0.12300000000000001,0.7829999999999999,0.095,-0.6486,1,0,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,2,9,10,0,0,9,0,15,8,2,4,2,36,27,15,0,8,7,0,0,1,0,2,6,3,0,1,6,9,0,2,1,1,0,3,4,5,0,1,5,4,13,5,19,19,5,15,0,2,0,0,6,5,0,7,8,88,19,1,0.14934829119490398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943377451051325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031239187673228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403176358227264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16672208541890293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15658884184770913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3463932056834883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864313779695362,0.13509407973682502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802831802593793,0.0,0.08487807561878513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327443374902433,0.0,0.16832637847984175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4450096546979031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558808141032701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548911482465724,0.07296403120425206,0.0,0.0,0.1321685379908446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073986553569493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353930041097464,0.1304051672392554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14290614474622715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14938870696353426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746342004286858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14206442534090946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354244979908155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15523005899087508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922036844975464,0.0,0.1467339378163013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3869669156745293,0.0,0.12322798125415865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609274105305053,0.0,0.0,0.09617540295345037
mentalhealth,NaturalDeselection,2020/03/16,"I can't get evaluated for my attention issues until fall, but it's interfering with my career and relationships. What can I do in the meantime? Looking for suggestions for things I can do while I'n waiting to get an evaluation for ADD/ADHD and to see if my attention issues are related to my anxiety/PTSD/depression. I assume I can't get on meds without an evaluation, so something like skills I can look into, therapy modalities, or even workbooks would be great.

I'd specifically love to hear about skills/modalities/workbooks that could help me properly pay attention in conversations so I can acknowledge them better. I'm really good at this when they're texting me, but I can't do it at all when we're face to face.

Things I've tried that didn't work: mindfulness practice, anxiety meds, depression meds. Alcohol helps, but I don't like drinking. 

Background:

I'm not appropriately responding when people are talking to me, mostly because I'm not paying attention to everything they're saying - but sometimes, I just have absolutely no idea what to say because even though I heard them, I'm not engaged enough to acknowledge what's said to me without them getting upset that I'm not acting like I care. 

My boyfriend can't take this anymore and is on the verge of leaving me (he doesn't feel loved or acknowledged), which would mean I don't have housing, but that isn't even the worst issue. I don't have friends, and because I also don't stick to tasks and complete them properly, I don't hold down jobs. This forced me to start freelancing - thankfully, this IS bringing in an income, but I feel like I could be doing even better with the right guidance. I currently make so little that the SNAP office decided I need another job to be eligible for food stamps.

My therapist referred me to be evaluated, since apparently the methods for handling this are different if the primary issue is attention vs something else that causes attention issues. I'll be hearing back in late summer/early fall to make an appointment. We really don't have a lot of doctors out here - I don't even have a primary care doc because I've been waiting for 8 months on waitlists. So finding another clinic would be really difficult, and I'm forced to handle this on my own for the next few months.",10.026732661091984,8.094916245327108,9.90273979340876,64.18667732415153,59.443925233644855,13.776881455976387,42.38612887358583,12.488612386084178,5.373923364485981,1835,85,314,51,19,606,205,428,0.09300000000000001,0.7759999999999999,0.131,0.9619,6,0,5,0,0,0,49.0,1,0,4,4,18,19,0,1,14,0,45,9,2,3,1,62,78,27,0,8,18,0,2,4,1,3,3,6,0,0,20,11,3,3,17,1,2,4,21,4,0,0,4,11,40,15,45,63,7,32,0,1,3,2,22,16,0,7,16,210,60,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936454048948917,0.0,0.0,0.08327341174947228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062313066327191635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341306174855152,0.05960903678640815,0.0,0.07727628572629575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0599161226668412,0.0,0.1899986696273202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13782885643835216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15889046585347955,0.0800459084180554,0.0,0.0,0.08169825435179147,0.0,0.0,0.12442649863432688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422577708290212,0.0,0.0,0.08141043024208322,0.0,0.07975502392307056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633251187534205,0.0,0.0,0.06509265298945563,0.0,0.0,0.08051279722027445,0.0,0.25732906849238035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003000043305066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879798141213759,0.055666483864738985,0.0,0.0,0.07121800607356564,0.0,0.09422188469308684,0.0,0.06020125324528908,0.0,0.16284116537308216,0.0,0.0,0.06535609256514552,0.0,0.08590772370611907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756443322639367,0.0,0.1044570557101392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990989710228482,0.0,0.0879628596861367,0.0,0.4066442490059069,0.15464832112622134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789781760635637,0.08250665218560863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15227225412790146,0.07809689996921085,0.0,0.0,0.13086733877352014,0.0,0.0,0.06624529772265356,0.1406527463625094,0.0,0.10402519553313584,0.0,0.0,0.08487836388318186,0.25965662305133524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867758153989958,0.0,0.12439094038174005,0.0,0.0,0.05777712891073885,0.0,0.0,0.0828694296676168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054020324823713516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108499793724548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975377244455326,0.0,0.0,0.08365755088904682,0.0,0.06654375667401376,0.07412032312704989,0.12393115867019312,0.0,0.0,0.06209262047808362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445671586705369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997415148776715,0.07706545427229529,0.0,0.05515259346762747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05858658507941721,0.06262961731180854,0.0,0.0717388087634168,0.0891089835899864,0.09047180876778954,0.10353395303057618,0.0,0.07655658239949821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05290296462720756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15022533307468872,0.0,0.056727116326342676,0.0,0.0,0.16605765087388327,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowawayAcc628678,2020/03/16,"Why do I have these thoughts? I'm kinda new to this whole depression thing. I've been depressed for four years but it only just recently started getting worse.

My question is, why do I have the desire to self harm? I've only ever done it once like two years ago, didn't even like it, and moved on. But now anytime I look at something I could use to harm myself my brains just like ""Hey..what if you uhhh ya know..did that?"" And I just don't get it.",1.7818085106382997,3.323985425531916,2.926542553191492,95.00875,77.72340425531914,5.5510638297872354,21.324468085106385,5.985473137389443,-0.005080851063829607,346,9,79,2,8,111,65,94,0.17800000000000002,0.695,0.127,-0.7499,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,0,6,7,0,0,1,0,10,1,1,1,1,15,17,5,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,4,0,2,4,1,10,3,6,12,1,11,0,2,1,0,4,2,0,3,11,49,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650569755232735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970942019107068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096510982408014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041337916824385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18067745929802634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166131677708376,0.15970445524172905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844858049743827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970302231989084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587681313292787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14826205820361324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18765043484899274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17051829264502166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18802572467328316,0.0,0.26855665492621283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977824396837768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174327144549244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841857736097961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359209623846008,0.0,0.0,0.12496681142005694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11729555375795114,0.0,0.0,0.140165255598505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17246895828855982,0.0,0.0,0.1524871669302983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3186275500960551,0.19711778407559716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17992502257899126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22739176085667825
mentalhealth,LaheyJames56,2020/03/16,I hear and see things that aren’t there I don’t know how to explain it really. Like I’ll heard people talking or singing but it’s usually incoherent. Then I’ll see people out of the corner of my eye and then when I look no ones there. Other times I’ll turn around and see something dart out of sight. Should I be concerned?,0.6210294117647059,2.940717573529412,2.127941176470589,94.94573529411768,86.5,5.1647058823529415,18.794117647058822,6.6274283507984215,-0.0060058823529414145,257,7,57,3,8,83,48,68,0.046,0.9229999999999999,0.031,-0.2272,2,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,1,1,0,12,13,9,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,5,6,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,8,5,1,7,10,0,9,0,0,6,0,4,4,0,1,6,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22095702738543735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27974754899599324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364081837204385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12126149851611705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20843153202636708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16819161963493912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34415123495571115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15900788544020295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5933669990574051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191082025756136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994995421908387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16489783202709546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14473161199343298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699781547134917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733651599009731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Supaveee,2020/03/16,"My Dr just blew my mind - folate and mental illness During a casual discussion about daily vitamins, my dr said, your family has a history of mental illness, so make sure you get a daily vitamin with methylated folate. I stared at her blankly and she proceeded to explain to me the connection between folate, folic acid and the production of serotonin and dopamine. This combined with the genetic mutation of the MTHFR gene, means that often families with histories of mental illness also have low folate AND normal ‘man-made’ folate supplements won’t help and might make it worse. Read here for details: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3869616/ and here: https://www.healthline.com/health/mthfr-gene. I’ve been struggling to treat depression and anxiety for 6 years and NO ONE HAS EVER MENTIONED THIS. 
TLDR; If your family has a history of mental illness, start taking a supplement with methylated folate",9.997364864864863,12.195241304054056,8.6792972972973,59.196783783783815,58.25675675675675,12.406486486486488,38.44864864864865,11.979248473330829,5.771924864864865,755,35,92,24,10,232,98,148,0.171,0.754,0.075,-0.9343,0,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,0,3,0,0,8,6,0,1,9,0,7,8,0,2,2,25,15,12,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,8,1,0,0,4,13,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,3,10,3,17,11,0,6,0,2,1,0,10,2,0,3,4,66,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365618156334535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829021279377665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318111304532002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13987013405993798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4373093492238179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078689550290065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436263343839205,0.0,0.0,0.10364407826315672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20643115841010612,0.0,0.0,0.1684355303593589,0.0,0.0,0.6233157587645344,0.164036171913231,0.1561304856477154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150288605134268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478012596032524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546701270013877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708690607531172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944669414456792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616510541558043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14573532620404955,0.0,0.11626122463171837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575794300213438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957554417316766
mentalhealth,Able_Secretary,2020/03/16,"Diagnoses SMI, what can I get for free? I am currently living in Arizona. What can I get covered when I am diagnosed SMI? I am looking for inpatient services. Where is the nicest facility to stay at?",1.07245614035088,3.6658558947368434,3.6484210526315803,80.18561403508772,95.31578947368422,7.796491228070176,30.017543859649123,8.344100000000001,3.392354385964913,156,9,28,5,6,54,27,38,0.0,0.815,0.185,0.7929,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,2,5,9,0,6,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,2,21,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7252832704435881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3733383571964585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315493447180771,0.0,0.30003345380414903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3808233974493298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cesloder,2020/03/16,"Concerned about access to medication I'm concerned that I will not be able to fill/obtain prescription medications that are critical to my mental health.  I've read that sources that indicate base elements and complete products could be jeopardized, and I'm not sure what can be done about it.

Basically, I depend on a couple of medications to keep me functional.  And if there are shortages and I can't obtain them, I risk losing work or worse.

I have not cited any sources in this post, but I will if requested.",5.782240601503759,7.519066021052634,6.347067669172933,73.72947368421053,67.73684210526315,10.06015037593985,32.5187969924812,10.290406445055957,3.6482481203007513,412,18,71,11,7,134,65,95,0.096,0.888,0.016,-0.5959,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,3,3,3,0,1,1,0,12,4,0,1,1,15,15,8,0,3,7,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,9,1,9,8,0,3,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,4,0,50,16,2,0.20776572544643948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14128781789388326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21783841022224687,0.0,0.0,0.16588402571803534,0.2298888234392299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21261647185084692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22084525058623827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18467172303523852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324367023601988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6279063309731415,0.20937898422986528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989821332265928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20782194980241814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19581673742690653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125592260285528,0.0,0.2117310241524244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hells-mels,2020/03/16,"How do I know I’m not faking everything? I’ve been diagnosed with GAD, Depression, and ASD, but I feel like it’s all been a result of me over exaggerating everything, and me looking for attention and pity. I constantly look down on people who fake any type of mental illness, but I’m so afraid I might be one of them.",4.9684375,5.3181589687500015,6.506250000000001,76.91375000000002,68.6875,10.775,30.0625,10.686352973137794,3.13473125,250,9,51,7,4,86,49,64,0.22,0.708,0.07200000000000001,-0.8745,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,1,1,0,5,2,0,2,1,14,11,7,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,2,3,7,1,8,7,1,4,0,2,2,0,2,3,0,1,2,33,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18278517249660567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904645226378817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23150685665471535,0.2728143342415503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4831389506285548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590737475256826,0.19202232209967576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14771894861811108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313163226729009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4514287329402192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708752553483728,0.2851417717494371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18213782004288814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18634387324396653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadbutcuteithink,2020/03/16,"How to get the most out of online counseling I recently started counseling through BetterHelp and while it’s been helpful to speak to an objective third party, I’m starting to feel like I’m not being a good patient or something. Our sessions mostly consist of me talking and I often divert so I feel like I’m giving too much information at once. My counselor mainly just validates my feelings which is helpful but I want to steer the convo more towards us working together to create plans/goals. 

I understand counselors won’t explicitly tell you what to do but my question is how do I steer our sessions so that we can do vent, validate, then some kind of action plan? This may seem like a very particular situation so if anyone can provide any insight at all re: online counseling that would be helpful too.",7.358491537895514,7.902090264900664,7.75465783664459,69.34860191317146,63.569536423841065,10.419720382634287,39.29433406916851,10.25414643259724,4.370840470934511,654,34,105,14,9,215,106,151,0.011000000000000001,0.813,0.17600000000000002,0.9645,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,4,1,0,2,9,5,0,0,5,0,13,0,0,2,2,29,26,13,0,3,6,0,3,3,0,3,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,8,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,4,15,5,15,20,7,10,0,0,0,0,14,4,0,9,8,80,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12614075559285956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297001494434464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813706173390388,0.26503069663157003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691178718057657,0.17794059557623604,0.0,0.1555816852358249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729936443023271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19316112075065486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27186570886557665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635778440359236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19754266748643504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20779321970436632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831507322170381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16886472905585856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20850050674974388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428006169019309,0.0,0.0,0.2625840407538668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909124803220666,0.1621279715617357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19310346083090615,0.22312374476087268,0.0,0.0,0.15305012585335098,0.10940784424722187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504020834513333,0.0,0.0,0.1317680222059824,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,f_ckyouxoxo,2020/03/16,"Research Project Regarding Mental Health Professionals Hi, I am a college student and am currently taking ENC1102. In this class, all students were put into groups for a project. My group’s project regards mental health professionals and how their relationships with their patients affects their own mental health. The link below contains a survey that we need to conduct for our project. It is completely anonymous and will really go a long way to helping us with our research. Please only take the survey if you currently, or previously, have worked in the mental health field. (Ex: Therapists, psychiatrist, worked in a mental health hospital, nurse with experience with mental health patients, etc.) Thank you for your time.

https://forms.office.com/Pages/ResponsePage.aspx?id=FFGz-HlgdkKsIq6A0d-6mCRXYsL9PPNBu66K76PylwFUMTRRWUxNS0tWWlFUTFRGMFM0R0pYVlkzVi4u",12.987000000000002,17.208690366666666,8.658333333333335,54.36000000000002,53.66666666666666,9.466666666666667,37.83333333333333,9.888512548439397,4.532233333333332,724,31,81,14,10,199,80,120,0.0,0.94,0.06,0.7184,2,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,4,3,3,2,1,1,0,0,8,0,6,6,0,2,1,17,11,6,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,3,9,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,12,1,14,9,3,12,0,0,0,0,16,5,0,2,4,52,15,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070141754344669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113830480920075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998400548609932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058006414554380985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6509478020701488,0.0,0.0,0.06841263484650942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032512754149456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6171506483490761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07568058654876311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776257315714741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112037730548704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260444058788758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538604202136275,0.0,0.0,0.10958060118039704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348173944569954,0.0,0.0,0.09396858632267233,0.0,0.1185064000714168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059515458855535976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122772734944021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101517666977891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861041099602226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spiteful_Brunette,2020/03/16,"My relationship is falling apart and its all my fault. please help Hello reddit,I'm a 17 year old girl soon to be 18. I have been with my boyfriend for three years now,hes a very handsome sweet hardworking guy,he loves me very very much and i love and adore him but i have an issue. I'm a very insecure person,because of this i get very paranoid and my mind starts to wander and develop negative thoughts. I will begin to think things like ""I'm so ugly,someone as great as him wouldn't want me"" ""i have a horrible personality,he's probably with me because he feels sorry for me"" things like that. and honestly that's how i feel about myself.. i don't think I'm that great. But because of this i start thinking that he's cheating on me out of the blue,that he's going to leave me any minute for someone better,more attractive,more exciting than me. Because of this i start to believe these things and i start treating him horribly,being cold and mean. ill start finding reasons to be mean and nasty to him. This negative mindset i have not only affect my relationship but it has made me very depressed,im sad all the time,stressed all the time. i want to go to therapy but my parents forbid me because they dont like it. Theres more factors that i feel cause me to act like this but i dont want to drag this on any further,I need all the help and advice i can get.Really please help me guys,i want this behavior of mine to stop for good or at least improve.",3.56631787675412,4.764793459731546,4.5021232458816325,86.91052471018915,72.45637583892619,7.700061012812692,27.30384380719952,8.150884317080207,1.6116456375838926,1153,41,243,17,22,374,153,298,0.16899999999999998,0.628,0.203,0.925,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,0,5,20,1,1,9,0,15,3,0,5,4,48,44,20,0,6,7,1,3,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,19,13,0,2,11,0,0,4,7,5,0,1,3,5,40,15,31,37,7,21,0,1,0,2,18,5,0,1,16,145,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473563614619581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793659590999266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642993710815339,0.0,0.0,0.09769665951423093,0.0,0.07669123188072145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907886900067025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20325565018727035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315351752972131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925476215952489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060867147903663,0.0,0.09856280212215793,0.07273134783605109,0.0,0.19120434803978115,0.0,0.08586020836182927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436712067534654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366568951290537,0.09050658678989383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181730093362143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16945575915078895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15652502189586434,0.08205061129921047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188913307544792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875561301981727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374455600335209,0.06429711898070775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099145432123198,0.0,0.0,0.06594968573082663,0.0,0.0,0.09628531571659778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757150689421675,0.0,0.19037123309759105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349204821006604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869918873052047,0.0,0.08915613847004777,0.0,0.1861961507799288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14694449419765007,0.0,0.0,0.09706890164777514,0.306882059660768,0.0,0.0,0.07249654632863149,0.09933026455067294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916468727594344,0.0,0.17282621225868824,0.16668793663123818,0.0,0.06884100161019792,0.101126926038296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42928736462464817,0.2045839769347066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168157549771048
mentalhealth,NightRaven1122,2020/03/16,"Important question regarding helping my father with mental health... Hey guys.. I'm not sure where to start so I'll just dive in.. basically my father as I know him is a really great, generous friendly guy and a lot of his shortcomings ive always chalked up to drinking (anger, depression) because it would often accompany it but there has been a consistent thing I've noticed where he will be the friendliest happiest dude one day and the next say he wants to die and he will tell me ""I always feel like this... you dont understand the struggles of not making enough to pay bills"" I cant say much to this aside from addressing the fact he doesnt feel this way everyday... 

he often goes on rants repeatedly telling me something regardless of how many times I say ""okay"" or ""yeah i get you"" and will profusely tell me I ""never agree with him"" or ""always think hes wrong"" which I simply dont.... I understand these sound like common behaviors of maybe a family who do not get along or have issues but  this does not feel normal at all... when like this he will also smile and make insults and turn very vindictive I think is the word... 

he refuses to believe he has issues and only got him to come close to admitting he does once in which he said ""maybe I do have mental issues BUT"" then ranted... if anyone can help it would mean the world to me.... how do I help him? what do I do if I cant convince him..? thanks so much!",4.5157611771363895,5.408649340501793,5.320354650066029,83.07246179966046,69.93189964157706,9.0278060743256,26.8705904546312,9.276330184999452,2.0612035842293905,1102,34,224,22,19,359,159,279,0.063,0.8190000000000001,0.11800000000000001,0.9263,0,0,2,0,0,0,51.0,0,2,0,0,12,14,2,1,10,2,27,2,0,4,4,54,49,23,1,7,13,2,3,3,1,6,1,5,1,2,14,12,1,1,11,1,2,1,10,5,0,1,3,8,29,9,23,39,5,21,0,1,0,0,40,9,0,9,13,140,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835498503239595,0.244582920679224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851025650978032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05972801449319549,0.0,0.0,0.11039049150069023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440154067065338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06318932853493914,0.0,0.08439047678274082,0.0,0.10168830879811606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17148682357138273,0.0,0.2296648752990044,0.09598360629651218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124006717926592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236731254826364,0.0,0.14862568201294254,0.06999730180384964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569950533645475,0.0,0.10238155356108612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836397112246406,0.10802386725467272,0.0,0.19403223505371506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414870910721964,0.0,0.0,0.19702282809483224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3067986146956514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05384753040952179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360499606606308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08329953278611298,0.0,0.0,0.13080551350486347,0.09933686683890378,0.1968692000857359,0.1067295083300823,0.0,0.0,0.1974826342322094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14405390936991666,0.0,0.07556861596946098,0.0,0.10420339270667284,0.0,0.09600010463558252,0.0,0.11155146941998584,0.0,0.10434605418109448,0.06639413491114543,0.0745185992882545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097606043171649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276882891530053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932019101535055,0.23375412224930975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543018983160084,0.0,0.0,0.06935111510903129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243051150953238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923454788838032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569178748081881,0.0902072970921438,0.0,0.0,0.06509390259708309,0.1255639196089262,0.0,0.0,0.057133228120739024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065746680245776,0.0,0.2040023499004561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084418889308427,0.057791448242143925,0.07777237475647734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920509791015406,0.10712631544951508,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MommaPale,2020/03/16,"Looking for coping methods for reoccurring nightmares so for context, i've always struggled with mental health in things like depression and anxiety. recently, after taking a (safe) dose of lorazepam to help me sleep through some anxiety i woke up and apparently asked my mother to take me to a mental health clinic. i have no memory of doing this (because i was still loopy from the medicine at the time of asking), and when we were later in said mental hospital's waiting room, i realized my mistake. yes, that place might help most people, but the treatment there only made things worse for me. as i went there voluntarily and hadn't been admitted yet, i decided it would be best for us to go home. note that up until this point i was told they can't legally keep me there. when i told the woman attending to us that we had changed our minds and thank you, but we were going to leave, she told me i couldn't, because according to the answers i gave i was deemed unsafe to leave. i do understand she is just doing her job, but i believe there were misunderstandings about the nature of my answers. i broke down in a panic attack realizing i was trapped in this unfamiliar place with these unfamiliar people. my mother tried to calm me down and asked the people coming to take me back into the facility to step out for a moment so she could console me. one of the nurses coming to take me remarked to her coworkers about how they should put me in solitary confinment if i don't stop crying. didn't help. eventually my mother was forced out and they took me back. i kinda shut down when stuff like this happens, so i was very unresponsive at the time. they had me strip and examined my body, the nurse saying ""oh, been trying to cut youself huh?"" when she looked at my cat scratches (i petsit for a neighbor). she later cut the strings off of my hoodie and put me with the other minors. i don't recall a lot of what happened because i spent all of my time staring at a wall, drawing, or figuring out how to get out of there legally. i do, however, remember some key points that made everything worse. i wasn't given any of my medication, i couldn't sleep because of allergy related congestion, i was scared out of my mind the entire time, and was also told by the nurse practitioner that i would never find a job. thanks lady, you really fucking helped me cheer up there. i did make it out eventually by putting on a smile, but i'm still left feeling traumatized by the whole situation. 

now that the long part is over, i keep getting nightmares about still being stuck in that place and not being able to reach my mother (we're very close). i always wake up covered in sweat and shaking, and it always affects the rest of my day. 

does anyone know how to help with these nightmares? it's really getting to me and i don't even know why i'm still getting them now that it's over. i'm still new to reddit, so i'm sorry if i did this wrong. thank you in advance, i greatly appreciate any comment or support in help. it means more to me than you may know.",6.399031491384431,6.341811636363641,6.8575361457714425,77.0144741532977,65.63299663299665,9.681837987720339,31.78035254505843,9.325443323948027,2.68377595563478,2408,85,458,40,34,787,276,594,0.11800000000000001,0.784,0.09699999999999999,-0.8425,4,1,1,0,0,0,66.0,6,4,5,2,33,23,4,4,27,2,42,12,5,7,2,88,95,36,0,9,10,4,2,2,1,5,6,2,3,1,26,31,0,6,16,0,1,13,12,12,0,1,34,7,83,11,87,50,10,83,0,2,3,1,46,41,1,11,31,331,109,4,0.06396762002049093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051154882619522016,0.1596785525887425,0.0,0.0,0.08700035031418242,0.0,0.09787010845720022,0.0,0.0,0.04472764723957464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179403269175575,0.07277240243876938,0.0,0.0983743026204334,0.0,0.15597626975403162,0.0,0.0,0.07206960262572176,0.06713007072297049,0.0,0.0,0.07105360537509148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766926017795202,0.110204881134978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05107293949374783,0.0,0.07026542690447651,0.04125382300404713,0.0,0.05509521739097702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05597849535011597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04225000973054161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574899722184677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03234395069428807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584652458275816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05913703394844722,0.13368176517821534,0.0,0.07270854518405369,0.0,0.0,0.07052452689812783,0.0,0.0,0.11313271025562165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598917764203042,0.0,0.0,0.2572568839210516,0.0,0.06416473848148903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695598500929267,0.11371471961762808,0.0,0.0,0.10546479319642596,0.0,0.0,0.13546494681301802,0.06950100631899353,0.0,0.0,0.06250269602543798,0.0,0.0,0.05660933077452345,0.10743338032086792,0.0,0.0,0.05438298303768225,0.0,0.12105541747147025,0.04269888308038762,0.0,0.0,0.06967949095271124,0.0,0.06444064743570188,0.19339294690757533,0.06785953612257127,0.12917812220404734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04933577203848912,0.061780326023260376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334611482090278,0.04865025751693762,0.0,0.07505221950036707,0.0,0.06927069888312665,0.0,0.13304128034313953,0.0,0.20049764432253275,0.0,0.12094015416275412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929153782873881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195859073930001,0.0,0.06316030765905495,0.0,0.07246284374093792,0.0,0.06084785507707757,0.05086961891256369,0.06404274688204911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190228504124761,0.12802763334130798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160651350675297,0.0,0.0,0.2554231198935369,0.05347979461754916,0.0,0.06687284530475399,0.07322762080445765,0.0,0.07258969714866012,0.0,0.0,0.19238275754749215,0.0,0.0,0.1766783705822321,0.0,0.0,0.08499448874181129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14920013459168727,0.0,0.0,0.2444952088068475,0.0710703795167462,0.08685963009811315,0.0,0.0,0.0665925483806157,0.15389034151866926,0.0,0.0,0.10555997149604034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05929862462315641,0.05772082754167115,0.07141756333746974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037693941509326,0.09088152388375556,0.06993855068718481,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TigerAndDeer,2020/03/16,"All the precautions being put in place due to the Corona virus is somehow triggering my anxiety and depression Before I start, I would like to clarify that I understand why all of these recommendations are being put into place, and I've been following updates from the CDC and appreciate their guidelines. 

My work (I work in a nursing home) has tightened security in our building and is making us work longer hours. That's something I totally understand why that's happening, and it wouldn't be a problem, but my boss and some people at work have turned extremely aggressive and it makes wanting to go to work harder.

Social distancing is highly encouraged. My local gym and my church have closed down for the time being (although my church has us streaming our sermons, it's not the same).

All my major events/trips have been canceled, and those have been the only things I've been looking forward to in a long time. 

Going to the store is just a bad scene from the hunger games. Everyone is becoming so violent and buying everything they possibly can that I'm to scared to go to the store anymore, and even if I could, my store might not even have what I'll need

This whole thing is driving me insane and the fact that we have no idea when this will all be over is making it worse. 

What has been helping y'all through all of this?",9.93391304347826,7.710425000000002,9.097786561264822,70.80146245059291,59.8695652173913,12.678260869565218,39.205533596837945,11.20814326018867,4.234710671936758,1067,41,195,22,11,337,144,253,0.13,0.8190000000000001,0.05,-0.9756,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,5,1,2,5,6,9,2,1,14,0,33,1,0,5,7,45,49,17,0,7,5,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,18,15,1,1,3,2,4,8,4,6,0,0,5,1,23,3,23,34,10,29,2,1,1,0,12,14,0,4,10,144,41,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890271550894062,0.0,0.11541350514922065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716891738029332,0.0,0.12852790860687754,0.09902721943881937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291659275457227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002342909530148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373021356994834,0.0,0.0,0.111202047367623,0.10459104937065468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19841711725260572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291072014103916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800423392355292,0.12295740370086808,0.1167343985638029,0.0,0.11460670366099665,0.0,0.0,0.13137409315043633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056855328968967826,0.0,0.0,0.10298890539341632,0.0977263473227654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330452155044544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345631453593955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629116814264344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850902669621621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068031451830872,0.0,0.24317584681085924,0.0,0.0,0.13119620900296208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135590697406786,0.0,0.2339796092686593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651246021686235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186304547261133,0.0,0.08959176298631953,0.0,0.0,0.0823713778469412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546297976009924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571930930742945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658343322905835,0.0,0.2423025876209173,0.2799714747866171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864145171986805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21002208524938748,0.1299294051591428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4236147784987896,0.0,0.11859686464397395,0.08267001691429553,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vautoend-,2020/03/16,"How I feel 
Am I hunger. Or am I hungers slave.
 A deep feeling inside me always. Breaking through in times of in-toxicity. An emotional ball of wailing. Anxiety. Depression. Compassion. Construction. Love 
In the end no one can see through my mask my ego. Only I know how to reveal it. Only I can break it. Only I can truly conceal everything with the intellectual web of my mind. 

Happiness is always a thing people take for granted. You won’t even know it’s gone. Only you will truly realise a piece is missing wen ur most comfortable and sanctioned. The place where you’ll never grow but always feel happy. The place you’ll run to forever. 
But what happens wen that’s gone..? What happens wen ur mask is missing?
A vulnerability. So sensitive and uncomfortable. Always. 
But only you can build it back up and ride over the fields of doubt, doom, despair, depression. Only you.
In the end it will always be you and only you.",1.4849175765360734,4.188534520231215,3.4152472703917813,81.9892849496896,93.97109826589596,6.031171055448513,23.74844786983516,7.3871296695380915,1.7226769000214084,724,30,127,15,27,242,100,173,0.17,0.7020000000000001,0.128,-0.8795,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,8,0,0,6,11,0,1,11,0,15,3,0,2,1,21,29,11,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,9,5,2,0,6,1,0,5,3,7,0,1,2,4,18,4,15,21,2,21,1,6,1,1,11,9,0,3,5,85,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4761994217807456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756158225639504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880126703300988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19716845053354332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875208755769366,0.20275516263339136,0.0,0.0,0.07559974665752285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028692623453384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17362323658524578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20243318968566526,0.24368958435764865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258084388270054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330461356336612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557196524455472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827860374590414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756105430383622,0.609363883367704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07935214810663263,0.0,0.2391726646989231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120979617551124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605967090081193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604213415744747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667425430688491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shinysmileygirl,2020/03/16,"I wish I’d completely lose my mind My whole life I’ve struggled to function normally. It’s exhausting. Twice I’ve had brief psychotic episodes. I’ve gone through many extended periods of dissociation of varying length and severity. 

I’m so tired of fighting and clawing to get a grasp on reality. I’m good enough at pretending to be okay, that I feel like I can’t get help. I can just put on a mask. But I feel so tired and empty and terrified 24/7. 

I feel like I’m on the brink. And it sucks. I want out. I’ve spent so much of my life trying to get better and I’m tired. I wish I’d get worse instead. Bad enough that I’d no longer feel this responsibility to maintain my tenuous grasp on sanity. Or the appearance of sanity. I’m tired of hiding. I need to hand this off to someone else. I need someone to take care of me.",0.43476190476190624,2.7784408304093624,2.9050125313283246,88.73842105263162,88.06432748538012,6.999832915622388,22.76274018379281,8.11559375814309,1.4777722639933164,646,25,142,16,21,222,93,171,0.23399999999999999,0.611,0.155,-0.9537,0,0,0,0,2,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,5,12,2,1,4,1,4,8,1,0,0,24,28,11,0,6,3,0,5,2,0,0,7,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,6,1,1,4,2,6,0,1,3,5,15,6,23,24,4,13,0,1,0,0,2,8,1,2,3,71,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237062889547306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843476828793587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500467096083406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854973202404482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242132056454614,0.0,0.0,0.2533689021703213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24797248056117946,0.1751790571367599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562256481155017,0.0,0.0,0.10283583476840713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218000877802517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17320004774480385,0.11979789297915247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371644044338731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12430292470789205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379679472346335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012928845101,0.18182112941147094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12012754336029813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123252581151056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13850953000932947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20776680448023374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281740864709236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921842195028227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5636688129484618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832412146387058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231601185140149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13688487303094846,0.28198098266337746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494567137265618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sonderpod,2020/03/16,"Not sure how to feel Trigger warning: sexual

So, history wise, v bad mental health, what’s new! (Joking) and something has been playing on my mind a lot recently, I wanted just to put it out there and see what people think.

So, years and years ago, when I was 13/14 I was that reserved, nerdy kid who tried hard not to be gay and all that fun shit we go through. I ended up on a lot of chat rooms where people would talk and then trade msn (remember that?!) details. I remember vividly talking to this 18/19 year old guy (maybe older?) who knew how old I was and sweet talked me into ‘camming’ with him. 

Bare in mind that I was a very naive, reserved kid, exploring what it was to be gay in such a hateful environment (created by my own mind and religious grandparents). I’d never exposed myself to anyone before, hated the idea of it, but for some reason, I did with this guy. I remember it not feeling ‘right’, but I was  young, naïve and didn’t really know what I was doing.

It’s kinda ‘plagued’ me for years, just seems to pop up a lot more lately. I kinda feel violated, or even used by what happened. I’m not sure how to describe it, and I understand teenagers do these things, it happens, and much worse happens to. I just wonder if I’m overthinking it, or if my feelings of violation/being used have some validity behind it? Just a vent and a search for people’s experience with similar situations.",4.122481751824815,5.387270043795624,5.256649635036496,81.77621532846719,71.18978102189779,8.39970802919708,27.93357664233577,8.841846274778883,2.1202020437956204,1088,39,214,20,20,360,160,274,0.113,0.853,0.033,-0.9593,1,0,1,0,0,0,48.0,1,0,0,0,14,12,4,0,8,0,17,4,1,7,4,69,39,24,0,4,14,0,5,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,24,17,0,0,16,3,1,3,6,5,0,0,11,8,22,7,30,25,9,30,0,0,2,2,12,11,1,13,16,147,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748527892531238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900835294347296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240442824453839,0.0,0.0,0.08398036757541692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741259367785625,0.0,0.0,0.06518571316156065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654056945568727,0.0,0.0,0.1996083320137493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608943525681572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954429254995736,0.2618213503480665,0.0,0.0884094307691748,0.1948775632829609,0.0,0.10490591106825144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141224296898464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05423902307392759,0.0,0.11132986179104716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517154591755117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915025818999974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09945920521664953,0.0,0.2989550088075488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255061889358959,0.0,0.07611802944462588,0.09531819369662252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207123140827462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052636388584211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921359855849704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322518291866515,0.10147271280428076,0.09744730769334899,0.0,0.3353993651428599,0.08428317602551359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864544358799977,0.08984628678066214,0.0,0.0,0.1013068179618905,0.0,0.11093492660124546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597859689445449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18603373346406274,0.0,0.0,0.23797678358440594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655671607979791,0.0632384092745417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700598377379689,0.0,0.0,0.10274276349570248,0.0,0.17047791281806193,0.0,0.08143195785241769,0.05821161473594817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702821301207192,0.0,0.0,0.10057647122209898,0.07010858678323043,0.0,0.0,0.2542199029810157
mentalhealth,wierdflexbutokey,2020/03/16,I’m so fucking ugly :) It looks like I have down’s syndrome or something. I don’t. I just want to be pretty. Why can’t I look like a normal fucking human being?,-1.961047619047616,-0.2094327714285704,1.5192857142857152,94.55988095238098,105.28571428571428,2.333333333333333,17.261904761904766,3.1291,-0.8465238095238097,123,4,26,0,6,44,28,35,0.102,0.5539999999999999,0.344,0.8004,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,0,4,11,2,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,4,2,2,9,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,1,2,1,2,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5589117125501918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953605088229054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5076833463827196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961732585456887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075305868117649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327122996370632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782944050626182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727634818416251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ReginaldBeans,2020/03/16,"17yr old male, hopeless and unstable I’ve been struggling for about two years with some pretty terrible insomnia (waking up 6-10x a night), which has recently gotten worse. As a result I’ve become increasingly angry with the world, and with people in general. In the past, whether with good sleep or bad I had always been rather temperamental and often aggressive, but now things have really gotten out of hand. I truthfully feel my sanity slipping away. I’ve begun talking to myself, yelling, punching walls, enjoying the pain, fantasizing about killing people, raping girls my age, cutting them up, etc. I have horrible headaches, splitting pain, and am so full of rage. I blow off steam in my backyard yard cutting up trees with an axe, pretending they’re people. I made a deal with the devil to sleep better, but that didn’t work out, evidently. I’m on anti anxieties and a plethora of other OTC, prescription, and herbal sleep aids, non of which I suspect are working. I’m beginning to feel trapped, as if I have no choice but to just eventually release my pent up anger. I can’t help myself, honestly. I’ve seen doctors before, I used to be suicidal, and still kind of am. Any how, what do you guys think I should do, but I legitimately need some advice. Thanks",7.166664622930718,7.73253777253219,7.258654199877378,72.66438841201716,63.97854077253218,10.605640711220113,33.810239117106065,10.451354775682146,3.6024067443286327,1003,40,174,23,14,323,157,233,0.29100000000000004,0.594,0.115,-0.9943,0,1,0,1,1,1,42.0,0,1,1,3,9,21,7,1,9,0,16,10,5,4,1,39,29,18,2,4,9,0,3,0,0,1,4,1,2,3,6,15,0,0,4,2,0,1,3,14,0,1,8,5,19,7,33,19,5,26,1,1,1,1,8,15,0,5,10,110,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684484557594614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652396902265813,0.0,0.0,0.09523156955599413,0.0,0.10712973002219273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13157159212836453,0.0,0.11692701934646313,0.0,0.1546624750116306,0.11916318422929753,0.0,0.0,0.12385343712578678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14437443499663688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14333622285170486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15618090839987572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161622012488026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745837425452164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866098714502406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938654336693792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549328075154079,0.1458294475867327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325086320621968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383741384454348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13141745642390415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469477551786666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29802351324000004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336834185560956,0.2912569868296459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14247037807098048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971280237969984,0.0,0.13827197730330895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4204214957388929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183561684755716,0.0,0.0,0.14639954887650064,0.0,0.1531803347170073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125583360464092,0.0,0.12892943132895826,0.0,0.0,0.09303593074351664,0.08973156979793702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13679810994245128,0.0,0.0,0.1209490474897102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20390064945200745,0.0,0.1427120756361148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018075893296222
mentalhealth,flawmyy,2020/03/17,"I self harm and I need help... None of my friends know this, but since I (F16) was 10, every time I get angry or sad because of something or someone, I feel the need to hurt myself. I often need to externalize my emotions and I throw them on me to punish me. Mentally I don't really make me feel good but I also bite and hit myself. At every bad event in my life I feel the need to do this because I feel like I deserve it even when I know that it's not my fault.

But today I really made a mistake and I hurt myself with a blade, on my hand until the wrist and I feel so fucking bad. 

I don't want to get addicted, I need help... :'(",0.6773844282238421,2.079791379562046,3.2464416058394185,92.12153588807787,80.45985401459853,6.026520681265208,20.175790754257907,6.816661863887847,0.17897615571776093,477,12,113,5,12,167,75,137,0.28600000000000003,0.624,0.09,-0.9863,0,0,1,0,0,4,20.0,0,0,1,0,5,13,2,0,5,0,4,5,2,2,0,29,23,14,0,7,6,0,6,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,7,0,0,1,4,10,0,0,2,6,30,3,13,20,1,10,0,3,0,1,5,4,1,3,6,74,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186045702014989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140028377419464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326237983764472,0.16983521242611946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566967385152771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920080905756714,0.0,0.2347369917185705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3521780425655013,0.09951784536941484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762488656670166,0.12878306089411487,0.145559776640023,0.0,0.0,0.1168404587875763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18674326805273114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982527490149354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531141934538093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09839358568979144,0.06805624133353817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181154142243046,0.09298560466603578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14038431303922685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5164557720942933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17848169712360512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532305111840205,0.0,0.0,0.11523259666021365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803068848018453,0.10724199039675007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122849902855127,0.0,0.13204262977408904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216431578966832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OwO_Whats_This_UwU,2020/03/17,"my best friend has been gone since Feb 27th. my best friend killed herself and i don’t know how to cope with it, I’m not suicidal myself but i just want to see her again so bad and my anti depressants aren’t even helping and she was the only person who genuinely made me happy and i just need help coping idk",1.739743589743593,3.630577769230772,2.976538461538464,93.01762820512822,79.0,6.17948717948718,18.525641025641026,7.1686216300943375,0.11048717948717934,245,5,54,3,6,79,52,65,0.196,0.52,0.284,0.6816,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,6,8,1,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,0,14,12,7,2,2,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,1,11,5,3,8,2,2,0,1,1,0,9,0,0,0,1,36,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19270139515956888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4844032149857879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19878051778513905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243571417579432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566181266068363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456820126464285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093895684067906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553367761453258,0.0,0.12683706010824275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21838064813240865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17112909085893266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175527456602449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20151837466127007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18391107159165526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19091324532796652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524486160338434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612690013236034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SomeDudeZack,2020/03/17,"Serious question My friends all call me a total sociopath, but I feel empathy and remorse for people. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I scare a lot of people. Here are some traits of mine, non are exaggerated.

I have a quick temper and am very aggressive at times.
I feel like empathy for people who annoy me.
I have an extremely violent taste in pornography. Such as r/guro and porn that involves rape, beating, and blood.
I used to kill animals for fun, I don’t anymore. (I have a tender spot for animals)
I threaten people a lot, and non of it is idol threats.
I use people
I steal. I steal wayyy too much.
I usually succeed in charming people.
I harm people a lot.

I don’t like myself. What’s wrong with me?",0.5473536989326462,3.006183993006996,2.8585498711814523,87.9734118513066,90.1888111888112,6.087449392712553,22.910931174089068,7.475848149327749,1.3289944055944058,553,22,111,11,19,188,85,143,0.384,0.495,0.121,-0.9945,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,4,21,7,1,7,0,10,5,1,2,2,20,15,7,1,0,1,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,5,7,1,0,4,0,0,0,3,14,0,0,0,3,23,7,14,15,7,6,0,0,0,2,5,3,0,5,5,76,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14097343749847896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14514984313255594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14374943364844314,0.10155114871411974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098238292891575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15726661334601116,0.0,0.0781212765004707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13889347099369975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3625495422159555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449574195208616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6898366775170122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15923921586576148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423157715116564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828881227688666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455418886570032,0.15655684768874698,0.11728766734409288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108348496601939,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iloverats1712,2020/03/17,"I hate this world so much. I want to get off. My friend is going clubbing tonight even though she has a 6 month old baby. I reminded her about the virus and she said ""I know"" and ""nah, it'll be fine"". Selfish. Fucking selfish. She could literally put her baby in intensive care (yes, that has happened to a young baby) because she wants get drunk.

I'm worried for my boyfriend's mum who has MS and suspected COPD. He's also scared she is going to die. I may not even see him for months. 

My friend is going back home even though her dad (potentially) and sister's gf have got corona (she has asthma but her mum basically blackmailed her to lol) and I will miss her so much. 

I will have to quit driving lessons I have spent £100s on. I may be on my own for 1 - 2 months or move back to my hometown which gives me severe anxiety. 

I can't concentrate on my uni work. It just all seems irrelevant. 

I will not go on holiday this year.
I will not have graduation this year.
I will not work at my temp job, loosing out on £100s
I may not be able to get a flat. Fuck, even hire a van to do so. 
I will not have a normal final year of uni. 
I am meant to start my masters. 
Or start a job - who knows if this will happen. 


The worst part? I am convinced this will be a regular thing, alike the flu. I will never have a life without covid-19 in it. The world and my life's paradigm has changed. 

The government are shit, and too many people will die. I want to get off.",1.0796824854899292,2.9462692409240923,2.7382929327415506,94.03990099009904,81.01320132013201,6.0274951633094345,21.33936497097985,7.0983637204850245,0.3834368726527826,1112,33,259,14,29,366,159,303,0.16399999999999998,0.7929999999999999,0.043,-0.9891,2,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,0,5,15,14,4,1,13,2,38,8,1,0,2,36,68,17,2,6,12,4,0,0,3,14,4,1,1,0,13,8,1,0,6,3,1,7,9,9,0,0,4,2,42,5,27,45,6,35,0,1,1,2,25,13,3,7,15,170,55,7,0.10608660350246138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848374184928842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115596130758009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314809951631795,0.0,0.06466940883484633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816236257225194,0.0,0.1122255599239692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470152055122288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202022910417909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28027680434715696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162126886647338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163924493413607,0.19615071096254214,0.2217034870677942,0.101767936795614,0.2411658461487436,0.0,0.08484714801658212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876240662416765,0.0,0.0,0.10473855778131952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641351308590724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21054916908946927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660484576117645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986421081476545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075551650006651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540319443712897,0.11275327053370444,0.1559717201107087,0.0,0.08182052865275335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039423471137449,0.0,0.0,0.1113200446882964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148814535291234,0.0,0.07354709331951233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664633783647437,0.0,0.1128361612830077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091265351859843,0.0,0.10621119706357804,0.0,0.08453728791260436,0.09657725949446108,0.0,0.11984766560663365,0.10889637398982027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501772879675876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704792254593698,0.0,0.20845909862012454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877178820646136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226370006709852,0.0,0.15446462167028313,0.10773609542302838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20494888340899112
mentalhealth,iam_MikeyB,2020/03/17,"Women **** Being in a relationship with someone you love is a paradox. Best thing in the world one moment and a complete pain in the ass and waste of mental health the next. So seeing as I can’t post my grievances on Facebook where she’d surely see here I am resorting to bitching on Reddit. 
The double-standard is crippling and wears on a person eventually. Can’t imagine I’m not the only one feeling like this.

Women can be so oblivious to their own self-absorption it’s actually impressive. 

So without going into details I’ll just leave it at that. Feel free to list your grievances here as for me think I’m gonna just stew in my mind for a bit - y’all be safe.",1.109283502874835,3.671510781954893,3.0762140645732003,86.94223794781072,87.796992481203,5.23467492260062,22.861123396727113,6.794906146795322,0.9432444935869092,526,20,100,7,17,176,96,133,0.134,0.6940000000000001,0.172,0.8176,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,1,1,8,9,1,0,10,0,10,5,2,0,1,16,20,8,0,0,4,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,3,5,5,0,1,4,0,1,1,4,2,0,2,0,4,10,8,19,15,3,15,0,0,2,2,10,11,2,0,3,69,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.19113610931520825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055483660591587,0.0,0.21383398921894653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20536085836096046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19807058581971712,0.1399260853135803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131466494945044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20819547011502945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073928879846901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568980714573387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767759235066081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19738597926932505,0.0,0.1977679426199875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083047837857733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654465571239308,0.1489642545176412,0.20841430382566126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17102187335291213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18758464880558945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21028584509252332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3121582937220004,0.0,0.20433004325345636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16595588584733068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18460056350211815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301240866929017,0.12550246420026914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18880699222126515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,laoleen,2020/03/17,"COVID-19 & My Suicidality Hi all,
I wrote a short essay on my experiences so far doing social distancing and shelter in place. I hope it gives people who are feeling similarly some solidarity. And just opens the box for discussion on how people with mental illness conditions can cope and help and also ask for help during these times. 

https://docs.google.com/document/d/10xXI_MYrz1ldjdNLKV3Lq9REf9mgwyx1HzhVnLFEYWs/mobilebasic",14.377786885245905,17.441761491803287,11.442745901639345,40.18575819672135,48.836065573770504,11.34590163934426,34.92213114754098,11.20814326018867,4.5125049180327865,365,12,42,8,4,109,52,61,0.04,0.78,0.18,0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,1,1,13,8,7,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,6,7,2,8,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,2,1,28,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21215011963359395,0.0,0.2874386267804562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24800776953746906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595018371556662,0.0,0.0,0.134137205635922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544877054205088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35563290609258263,0.0,0.0,0.26349009976223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26734715385752783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3678335556083983,0.0,0.2771687148983012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27042694507248743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901811958996733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15469113006475374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anothertiredperson,2020/03/17,"How do I start to fix this? I’m a 20 year old female currently living with my boyfriend. I work for him as a photo editor but no work is coming in right now due to the virus. I don’t know if I’ve fully faced some of the things that can be going on for me mentally, but I want to start to try and fix it. I knew there have been plenty of periods of time in my life where I felt happy, productive, motivated, and energized.

I’m currently feeling super avoidant in life. I need to get my license but avoid driving because I get all anxious and worked up. I’ve been studying life and emotional intelligence coaching for the past year or so and I want to start working with people, but I avoid that because phone calls and FaceTime makes me feel anxious and I just feel like I don’t have the energy to face any of it or move forward in life at all. I also feel like who am I to coach someone else when I’m currently feeling like such shit myself. 

I feel like I can’t take even the tiniest bit of criticism without being destroyed and beating myself up so much, and I have moments where I feel like I’m being criticized when the person tries to make it clear I shouldn’t feel that way. I’m just so sensitive and sometimes it really sucks. I’m a highly sensitive person (read more in r/hsp) and I feel stuck in this place where everything just feels like it’s too much to try and achieve.

I just feel such little motivation or energy. My only motivation right now is to not bring my boyfriend down with me. I’ll bake him cookies to show him I’m still showing up but I find anything I do throughout the day it’s really just for him. Outside of that I don’t feel any motivation at all. 

When I start to feel this way my relationship with food gets so shitty, too. I really don’t like the way I my body looks, I’m not overweight but I’m not super tight and toned. I also struggle with acne a bit and I know food affects this. I get really anxious and eventually just feeling depressed after eating certain foods like pizza or ice cream. I used to just throw it up when my anxiety about it got to that level but I live with my boyfriend now and would feel so embarrassed if he ever caught me doing that, and so then I just feel depressed about eating it in the first place. I find myself eating more when I’m not hungry when I’m not feeling great mentally. Sometimes if something comes up and makes me sad enough to take away my appetite completely I almost feel relieved that I don’t want to eat. 

I try to exercise once a day to keep my body moving but outside of that I find myself doing something for my partner or just sitting on the couch, on my phone or watching Netflix. I try to tell myself “why don’t you practice Spanish” or “why don’t you read that book you’ve been meaning to get to” but I just don’t feel the energy or motivation. I feel so weighed down and just trapped at this point. 

In high school I was a high performing AP student who was always busy and sleep deprived, working insanely hard all the time. I don’t know what happened to that person, I feel no energy or motivation and I used to work myself so hard, where did it all go? What’s happened to me? I dropped out of college because I was paying to work down a path I didn’t even want to be on but I feel like I’m stuck. I guess I just need help and advice on where to start, what to do. I know everything is connected, but I don’t know how to approach it all and put the life back into myself. I just need help clearing it all up I guess.",3.955380179772739,4.684475421052632,5.078137260444347,84.89895330431344,71.10526315789474,8.109944033014868,27.89258861439313,8.290611406555254,1.7403721182655878,2762,95,580,40,49,913,262,722,0.115,0.73,0.155,0.9743,3,4,2,0,0,0,51.0,0,2,0,19,51,28,3,5,20,0,38,23,6,14,11,151,120,66,0,12,42,0,26,9,1,2,7,0,2,4,33,33,11,5,39,9,1,13,21,12,0,1,14,29,87,16,82,100,15,96,0,4,3,0,20,45,2,16,44,377,120,21,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0455654287069102,0.0,0.0,0.046692320235404434,0.0,0.0,0.07457856824506014,0.038799156671206106,0.0,0.0,0.06341879045553969,0.0,0.035671143148812805,0.15803287276837333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03837178622391835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043809585781237836,0.03585490898349921,0.0,0.08527402187329305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10181382722033264,0.10358886358780478,0.0,0.0,0.047613536930478366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803337025499023,0.048889736910752685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06014383958536995,0.0,0.08032317189994555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19085289071225456,0.038952639866381936,0.052451475037656035,0.0,0.04818033757610738,0.0,0.0615961775824928,0.04217870148728126,0.0,0.0,0.08381447863718441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5186957630850093,0.2331829291507805,0.044771260064619914,0.0,0.12785449118358042,0.03966269895601213,0.16915232242459582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12180893270756557,0.0,0.053000797981878484,0.0,0.03729356061962291,0.05140876073690178,0.10273444804426254,0.0,0.08246793972045605,0.04963755692560883,0.08354105115224017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250902192047336,0.14779865123900654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04144609733809998,0.0,0.0,0.1281307028459678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16467760441518084,0.20502565972700676,0.046734620260051665,0.08234872058880954,0.0,0.03915671034596254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337588328029732,0.0,0.0,0.05079277290057421,0.0,0.0,0.09398235548262683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911873358165553,0.0685555252577114,0.10372468742385284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048929409317927317,0.04965848260726507,0.0,0.035463540961992585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044512763720671054,0.03232675519714876,0.12214422642573185,0.09743499534734812,0.0,0.044079582822427216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046875136736335,0.0,0.0,0.09328346125693716,0.0,0.11948721294469765,0.0,0.0,0.05006221596794397,0.0,0.07964201396120373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719115088353208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047864113521562335,0.0,0.0,0.046662787115625534,0.0,0.03950869538929284,0.0717947372176515,0.09223476839679966,0.0,0.16502162781638904,0.0,0.037238069179102565,0.0,0.0,0.04874687226238175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011857851205917,0.0,0.04075589926162392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030978310155803837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05437962052703405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829053159973167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08054516306209776,0.0,0.0,0.11001223380811358,0.1110360564032702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415104200307695,0.0,0.0,0.04494880012813074,0.0,0.2376258428571699,0.0,0.0,0.03312398340150398,0.0,0.0,0.06005523883052595
mentalhealth,Emmwojj,2020/03/17,"I hate everything. I fucking hate the world right now. I fucking hate myself. I hate who I’ve grown to be. All I feel is anger every fucking day. I wake up, I cry. I get home from work, I cry. I have a wank, I cry. I drink myself to sleep and take pills every night and hope every night that’s it. I can’t deal with the stress of being myself, dealing with my past and trying to get through in a country and a world so toxic. I can’t forgive the people that fucked me over. I can’t forgive myself for letting people fuck me over. I don’t want to fucking feel anything anymore.",0.06845433255269384,2.2027363606557406,2.0266042154566755,96.05393442622952,87.03278688524591,3.8135831381733016,19.370023419203747,4.65589566412798,-0.5040370023419207,444,13,98,1,14,147,68,122,0.297,0.634,0.069,-0.9856,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,2,15,11,1,6,0,9,10,2,0,1,13,26,5,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,6,1,0,4,1,0,1,4,12,0,0,0,2,23,3,14,23,1,13,0,0,0,6,5,7,6,1,5,63,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056204108388938,0.0,0.0,0.08764127882288239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35095916411587164,0.068684358135177,0.21959578502430227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433047071120967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26919515060783633,0.0,0.09571626466345276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770024842425148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5907509544076137,0.11128479213602104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4205908995109877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682922348991056,0.10577956006757364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890452581005812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19988801694688196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166729048408754,0.14766881839378013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095130352882737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065779505907956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199657784293945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007552546783707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230721308619724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06281707086061508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775340232230548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nomansland1234,2020/03/17,"Finding Myself After Breakup Hi everyone. Just wanted to come on here and share what I've been going through lately. The past couple of months have been excruciating. I guess the downward spiral began when my boyfriend left me. He manipulated me and put me through a lot of mental agony. He cut off communication all of a sudden and didn't tell me why he ended things. He would text me a little bit, call me, but would always make excuses about why he couldn't see me. Eventually, I told him that sending time together is important for me, to which he replied in a gibberish text days later. 2 months later, with barely any communication, he texted me at 1:30 AM saying that he saw no future with me which is why he treated me like this. I definitely got the hint before, but I guess I was hoping that he'd come back. 

After he left, I felt like something was wrong with me. For the past two months, I was confused and mainly blamed myself. I couldn't function or do anything; I even didn't eat some days. I think that I was depressed. I went into a research frenzy, trying to make excuses for him and went deep into psychology, like reading about attachment theories, anxiety, etc. I guess I was just trying to cope. I tried so hard to let him and the memories go, and I still do, but images keep flashing in my mind from our time together and I can't stop them. Even though I know that he is toxic, I want him back, and the fact that I want him back makes me more depressed because I then blame myself. I tell myself that I am not self-sufficient or strong enough to be content with who I am. 

Now, I want to get back to who I was before I met him. I was very motivated, focused, and genuinely happy, even though I was alone. I am trying to finish my assignments that I have put off (semester papers), but still don't have the motivation to do anything. It's like I can't find meaning outside of him. 

Any thoughts? I know this is a lot, but any help would be much appreciated :)",4.740923076923078,5.5350430923076965,5.721025641025642,80.76230769230772,69.35897435897436,8.564102564102564,27.82051282051281,8.730908602173464,1.9453589743589759,1546,50,309,25,26,511,192,390,0.121,0.735,0.14400000000000002,0.8915,0,1,1,0,0,0,54.0,1,0,1,3,19,14,1,1,13,0,38,1,0,6,2,64,69,22,0,10,10,0,2,4,0,3,0,1,0,0,17,18,1,2,10,1,0,9,9,5,0,1,21,5,63,9,36,39,10,51,0,2,2,0,35,13,0,10,33,213,80,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466396098219264,0.0,0.0,0.06801902634240316,0.0,0.0,0.16676977344458627,0.0,0.06253528771421381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345396014706023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514297946545844,0.0,0.049831460593117376,0.0,0.13911925306219422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924520517813372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834715674408631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14083347935187795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045013593268574,0.0,0.10543851361920277,0.0,0.1408150180084297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364632710248215,0.0,0.0,0.07240248579390711,0.08446522893646312,0.09116813829578617,0.1619769236640735,0.0,0.0,0.07811158314067519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848875540065438,0.0,0.14942829947752345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04270878912543312,0.0,0.09291600600105812,0.0,0.06537955718173306,0.0,0.2701565340844449,0.0,0.0,0.08701988862044427,0.07322815038417216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479246423675376,0.0,0.0,0.08119199107071484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265939336053083,0.0,0.0,0.08985067099273725,0.0,0.09221278533925792,0.0,0.17763402922911142,0.08359058481130148,0.0,0.1597474097241488,0.08193073353395247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13899465504346115,0.0,0.0,0.1636978019499378,0.0,0.0,0.08904510443887595,0.0,0.0,0.0823805059407129,0.0,0.08253992118486989,0.0,0.19574607304141425,0.0,0.06009254425215577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15607116792496886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643541475652082,0.0,0.0,0.08176788818267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500751464888252,0.0,0.0,0.06514079233388699,0.0,0.08527866267106947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293188487879503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13056454963173664,0.06834312122517029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428988062280247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054308255006338915,0.05237938649896354,0.160629601311094,0.06489700760337877,0.09533322779315023,0.0,0.0,0.07811158314067519,0.0,0.22200003840032853,0.0,0.07985373586062126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744881856849975,0.1928630844426052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15155828926001097,0.22128851889437345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17420954161286814,0.08937616313056132,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BobTheMan1101,2020/03/17,"My best friend is the best part of my life I’m 18 I’m leaving very soon for the military. Someone I need to see almost everyday is my best friend. She’s small 5’1” on a good day and close to 100 pounds she’s a year older then me. I have a bad day I see her. My parents get on me about school, I see her. The thing is my parents HATE her. They think she’s the worst thing to happen to me. I’m usually a very shy quite kid but around my friend I’m actually happy. I’m scared about what imma do without her.",-1.4492625368731566,0.5129379380530992,1.1320707964601766,100.36388790560473,94.39823008849558,4.429262536873156,15.497935103244838,6.079149491110277,-0.7623293215339233,389,9,99,4,15,132,64,113,0.10800000000000001,0.698,0.19399999999999998,0.883,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,4,4,12,1,1,8,0,5,1,0,0,0,8,18,3,0,1,2,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,21,8,12,18,5,13,0,0,3,0,14,5,0,1,8,58,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.1385900260326978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422114815950918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642699105903138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857990592737873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4471204343100646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831809705135958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32917050654993785,0.0,0.0741990490278736,0.0,0.0,0.11911877209675345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12558690414840545,0.1511818319921278,0.0,0.14021432836639994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15037758091745146,0.0,0.0,0.10031219691522557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530526506404707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31539051372905474,0.15379270241598406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15105465365269216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14218576211784578,0.14373077738458406,0.3395121900951996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033221049786715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887021832437745,0.09100002005376738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641382867793235,0.2343610436314617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690121694351387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145555895035946
mentalhealth,AltieMcAlt,2020/03/17,"I need professional help NOW Oh god, I’m in so much pain. I have been for a long time but things have just gotten worse and worse. I can’t deal with the loneliness anymore, I NEED to see someone but now COVID-19 is taking over and my already low chances of getting help have diminished to almost zero.",1.6172142857142866,4.1687531500000015,2.5028571428571422,92.38500000000002,84.16666666666666,5.428571428571429,23.57142857142857,6.868970318607317,0.8006428571428574,239,9,49,3,7,75,47,60,0.242,0.628,0.131,-0.8686,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,9,13,5,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,5,0,7,11,1,7,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,1,4,31,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23703981118634596,0.0,0.26122522208446075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347615670870121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440468192111217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367586902618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3173354135919997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20948880108505846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17401564840792416,0.3510481694970449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25188562801315856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886343365363604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005711784739222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779831729003552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15726553645616242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13803270984528365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4824736196934333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,booknerd03,2020/03/17,"Panic attacks I’m a 20F student and lately I’ve got pain on my chest, my heart is racing and my breathing gets fast when I feel anxious. Now with the self quarantine it gets even worse because I don’t have a rhythm in my day schedule anymore. I have got this for a few months now and I think they’re panic attacks. It happens when I think about a subject that gives me anxiety a lot especially when I’m alone. I don’t really know what to do, but I really want it to go away. Sometimes it even gets so bad that I feel like this life doesn’t even matter that much. I want help, but I don’t know how or where to start.",2.3686363636363623,3.4281004090909093,3.771636363636365,91.53245454545456,75.21212121212122,6.795151515151516,23.806060606060605,7.1686216300943375,0.6908278787878785,482,14,111,5,10,159,79,132,0.179,0.73,0.091,-0.8552,0,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,12,7,2,2,6,0,8,5,3,1,0,18,27,11,0,2,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,10,4,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,2,2,15,1,9,25,3,17,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,13,68,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15294849664552496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297225091082268,0.1668326064018218,0.14645557806627926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360070704853167,0.13874709583962214,0.0,0.12330385379601724,0.0900223293943344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523923733020058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926171499452729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14933952647576001,0.10550024495488072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314649001005161,0.14166492153025628,0.0839280566802059,0.0,0.2362210524121224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058999454168085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17499756896590227,0.09898456126187896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16231847519892556,0.0,0.1665857198921092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430840171156207,0.07214736316631902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255494267220271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787411175752616,0.0,0.10855934681469796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571383924336387,0.3465335149400595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18921091686225566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405897739918295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460560060348341,0.0,0.10452630949118301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892504987314828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17420705623564986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15049514652400944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FallenStar1937,2020/03/17,"I'm Addicted To My Anxiety Anxiety is a normal part of the human experience. It evolved as a tool we could use to detect threats in our environment and adjust our thoughts and behaviors accordingly to ensure our safety. When functioning properly it can be an effective warning system. Healthy anxiety is merely a form of information that we can analyze and act on if we see fit.

Chronic, excessive anxiety is something else entirely. It floods our body with unnaturally high levels of cortisol and adrenaline for extended periods of time. It can wear down our immune systems and overwhelm us psychologically. Uncontrolled and superabundant anxiety can be like a giant maniacal spider, snatching our every thought and spinning each into its darkest iteration.

We may be in a state of constant worry, obsessing over past mistakes and fretting about what lies in store for us in the future. It may become difficult to leave the house, speak to other people or trust our own decision making. Our worst fears, however outlandish, may seem always on the verge of coming to fruition.

I’ve lived with chronic anxiety my entire life. It ebbs and flows, but it’s always there, a shadow I can’t ever seem to shake. Sometimes it would be so bad it would feel like my brain was on fire. I was afraid of everything, all the time. Getting through the day was a feat of extreme mental and emotional endurance. From the moment I woke up all I could think about was slipping back into bed and receiving the temporary reprieve of sleep.

These days my anxiety is consistent, but stable. I’m never comfortable. I can’t sit still for more than a few moments without shifting positions. Leaving the house requires some serious psychological prep-time. My brain isn’t on fire, but it itches. And yet I’m rarely in serious distress. I don’t have the flu. It’s a low-grade fever.

There are even rare moments I feel no anxiety whatsoever. These are the moments when I panic. If I’m not feeling anxious then something is really wrong. It’s only logical that when anxiety is your baseline, no anxiety is an indicator that something has changed, and maybe not for the better. So when these moments come I hold my breath and wait for the other shoe to drop. Feeling okay? That’s not okay.

I’ve actually grown fond of my anxiety. I rely on it. It gives me energy. It gives me focus. Unless my depression has totally taken me over, I’m ready and raring to go. Fight-or-flight. Do-or-die. The intensity of this psychological state is addictive. Every day life can be dull. Anxiety gives it teeth. There have been times when I would purposely get myself wound up before going in for a shift at work. I needed my juice to get through the day.

Who would I be without my anxiety? Calm, chill, relaxed? Someone who can take the time to think things through rationally and who doesn’t overreact or respond impulsively? Someone who could take the energy spent on excessive worry and put it towards things that are more healthy, productive and positive? That doesn’t sound so bad, actually. But I would really miss the rush. Anxiety makes me feel like a soldier in a war zone. And I like it.

What can I say, I’m addicted to my anxiety. I’m addicted to the hormone high. I think I’ve lived with it too long. Out of a desperate need to cope, I developed a toxic, dysfunctional way of relating to my illness. It’s holding on to me, and I’m holding on just as tightly to it.

This needs to end. It won’t be easy. This is an addiction and a mental illness rolled into one. But it’s possible. The first step would be to say:

*Sorry, anxiety, I’m just not that into you anymore*",3.740110233409205,6.32345131222386,5.19252309546124,76.15863513634132,75.64212076583209,8.886874637390102,30.31733386888026,9.457814108942452,3.352953657339224,2887,136,498,81,66,965,322,679,0.19,0.715,0.095,-0.9955,1,0,3,0,1,0,94.0,14,2,0,5,21,34,3,8,38,2,55,24,9,4,5,103,100,42,1,16,18,0,8,4,0,10,16,4,1,1,47,36,0,6,17,1,2,12,16,22,0,2,10,13,52,12,80,69,12,83,0,4,1,0,30,33,0,10,35,343,99,2,0.0,0.0,0.1020836677477598,0.2850991710560771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704338675998824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6402071334869553,0.0590894134707573,0.05187219929066963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04021907919729382,0.08734446528926383,0.0,0.0577664224048042,0.044507440054696236,0.0,0.0,0.04625924914726106,0.0,0.05809872102189601,0.0,0.1167786678563296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05533142826578023,0.090111720728486,0.0,0.05652278994308424,0.0,0.1252831203040811,0.0,0.0,0.13492879586594653,0.0,0.04504995415702317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04369385816738966,0.058835737932711074,0.046326431825258564,0.0,0.0,0.034546755446805764,0.0473125879732863,0.08813791696449567,0.0,0.04700808410558443,0.05116402478277565,0.0,0.0588573195215507,0.1322341180446385,0.07473296413520572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04449034388078912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08198112755647494,0.15052627846217526,0.059451923097446575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052555661988432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070518288656056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107662322212651,0.0,0.0,0.0738887008977525,0.10221372104423246,0.0,0.09237200174406696,0.04628800605603379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982757547454857,0.0,0.05254709285281621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054216537000144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163497980188528,0.0403406025765001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05124749234485792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035443012625022065,0.039780074835031806,0.0,0.06136828581473395,0.0,0.0566408838532123,0.04993074644802454,0.036261487320020776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05896568075619139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05258066162293863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701544944233886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831895800948974,0.0,0.0,0.041680067224336835,0.09523245345255957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05234246533531844,0.0,0.08863519076704399,0.12080012070736908,0.0517306773335017,0.05855081990023666,0.0,0.0,0.04177059420672019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786532372366644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694978258139208,0.10054420305127028,0.0,0.08304816514060115,0.1219971449768338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583220756580718,0.04517445984375923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041517029539744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008397122418349,0.0,0.03807843836707262,0.10623590632246607,0.0,0.22293451293400865,0.05718696924104185,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GoodTimeOllie,2020/03/17,"What's up with my friend? I initially emailed the UK charity Mind about this, but got a really textbook, vague response. So I decided to take to the internet! Here's the original email I sent to the charity. If you have a minute, please have a read and let me what you think is up, how I could help etc.   


*""I’m emailing because recently I met up with an old acquaintance from uni, her name’s \[let's call her Sami\], and immediately when we started hanging out in person, I noticed she was very much not herself. She was talking to herself, consistently mumbling, laughing… her personal hygiene wasn’t great, and she wasn’t able to actually hold a conversation. When I asked her a question, she’d trail out mid sentence and go back to mumbling, and the things she had to contribute to conversation made me feel like she wasn’t that well-connected to reality.*

*Her mother came to drop her off to our hangout which was a bit of a red flag, and she explained to me that Sami wasn’t very well, but it wasn’t until her mother left, and Sami and I started trying to talk that I really saw how badly unwell she was. When the time came for our hangout to end (we were at a restaurant), she went to go back to her mother, but I didn’t actually feel comfortable leaving her to walk the streets alone even though she had a destination that was round the corner (her mum was just shopping nearby).*

*Sami’s not that close-a friend of mine, I’ve only known her a few years, and can count the number of times we’ve spoken on one hand. She’s usually very intelligent, thoughtful, sharp, and jokey. Completely different to who she is now. What’s more, she’d never said anything in the past about having any kind of underlying disorder or condition, so this was a complete shock.*

*I’m now wondering what can be done to help her? Can you offer any advice? I’m happy to provide more details, to the best of my ability, as I said I don’t know her that well.""*",3.954241107792562,5.435684456692918,5.1122707937369904,81.81023622047245,71.88713910761155,8.509765589646122,28.623495338944696,9.035553425615538,2.3211633813014743,1522,59,301,31,29,503,201,381,0.038,0.7759999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.996,1,1,0,0,0,0,63.0,4,3,0,1,19,12,0,0,23,0,32,1,1,4,1,45,58,25,0,2,8,4,5,1,2,0,0,2,0,2,16,18,0,1,10,4,1,8,10,2,2,1,28,9,53,10,45,24,7,44,0,0,3,0,63,15,0,4,21,209,69,2,0.10105183481187983,0.0,0.197224027747954,0.0,0.0,0.0987466834481832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046592252262743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743742577429366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831570498758413,0.0,0.09446982455412133,0.0,0.0,0.15540524682565207,0.08437406112995975,0.0616002605721013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060476662322971,0.0,0.11032243141881716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318522161538003,0.23115275701765975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21190185241728715,0.0,0.0,0.08068166743465052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557765959174067,0.11581415741481195,0.0,0.0,0.10341111146022612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950193186969416,0.0,0.11269950766142027,0.06674378385069456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218968789758956,0.07219145098071829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561447938114879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486017292807682,0.0,0.08082038355985112,0.11141000462441307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757155720847916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13546582958628964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522993568127273,0.05553544567882098,0.0,0.0,0.1069993023326814,0.10979311419678564,0.20666469513284552,0.0,0.04936882216374841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561768943014902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203354652002608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742847257598666,0.0,0.07793740465493253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11504818370037673,0.10603690188678548,0.0,0.06847533851057024,0.07685447394450783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964654105813841,0.0,0.17646912881352672,0.0,0.1109245693269754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320118178813633,0.0,0.10107918087351034,0.0,0.12947278592120814,0.0,0.09977649589254403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19224687108685276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14305001758157593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759784037225226,0.16244327409263687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671343488588946,0.06474993545319857,0.0992829146344828,0.08022386924115009,0.11784827503227245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860756262061847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129431954959763,0.2501350401722219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725732060001005,0.09367606326562353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10958640427080962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507406850430482
mentalhealth,raeraeq,2020/03/17,"I´m really trying First of all, sorry for my bad english.

I have been fighting with my mental health problems about my insecurities all my life and I hate that it affects my personal life, specially the man I truly love with all my heart: my boyfriend.

He really likes joking around and he´s really funny but... The jokes about me being ""too clingy"",  ""too annoying"" or ""too stupid"" makes me sad... I really overthink EVERYTHING and I know I have a problem but I want to recover and be like everyone else... I feel like my boyfriend is very careful when joking around me now and I feel terrible..... because we have talked about this but this is something I have to solve by myself.

Please, someone that has been in my situation before and tips to realize that jokes are just JOKES!! and stop overthinking if I´m ""too something""????? Thank you all, I wish a response soon :(",3.5044103773584894,6.146511056603777,4.167386006289309,82.88428655660381,76.7987421383648,7.748584905660378,25.66077044025157,8.660442795831766,2.142273270440251,674,25,122,15,16,214,97,159,0.127,0.636,0.237,0.9667,0,0,2,0,3,0,40.0,1,1,0,1,13,22,4,1,4,0,12,5,1,2,4,33,22,13,0,5,6,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,2,6,12,0,1,4,5,0,0,0,10,0,1,2,2,26,12,14,18,4,8,0,1,0,1,8,3,0,2,8,87,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26928649056859405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262861927332754,0.09219969117103563,0.0,0.1287013466554005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542079416708326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634872686010068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452443811060262,0.13593241311214604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529515878263902,0.10805196964744157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286519099634273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14932659591491187,0.0,0.16077009920766136,0.0,0.17923021902334424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312222859252193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136625988030834,0.2216771543513673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13650769031612905,0.0,0.10095955851664133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524229295277061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206436975039124,0.0,0.16602545087056267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894488054256712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3875746877082341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700096684129978,0.0,0.0,0.1281523763078485,0.2328769930310841,0.0,0.16931033013081956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645053136362738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156782751448443,0.0,0.13924931213337155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268781376686853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12479586525958287,0.08921029311730412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17392832840807332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MMmartaAA,2020/03/17,"I try to be optimistic and active, but I always feel so tired, and my head always hurts When something bad happens I try to stay positive and think that it will be better in the future, that I can be happy in every given situation if I believe it...

But I can't physically move, when I stand i feel like fainting and everything goes black, my vision is more blurry and I feel so tired that I have to go back to bed, I'm so tired of this 

What can I do? Should I see a doctor or a therapist?",1.5774649406688217,3.1923819999999985,3.995663430420713,86.79947141316076,78.51456310679612,6.907874865156419,21.153182308522112,7.793537801064563,0.8216179072276155,378,10,82,6,9,132,65,103,0.215,0.598,0.18600000000000005,-0.7639,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,3,0,11,6,1,0,0,14,20,14,0,2,4,0,3,1,0,2,5,0,1,0,7,5,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,5,14,3,7,14,1,10,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,2,5,58,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27579194413685953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274318297586596,0.13837294703469422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18671464168870489,0.0,0.1465697594213901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16962594004079545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962994994000527,0.0,0.1489423997411321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25138569985090103,0.11839354049257225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418499247352853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14654953467935064,0.17641669950106342,0.0,0.0,0.1700810401719477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17741139182849033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096456805495544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17613880416603933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206088594933718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862811629168633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758273539193618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664015412779707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924187951373452,0.0,0.10618950029162348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5714274370547183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250319707631415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,squid_loli,2020/03/17,"Help, I'm going in downward spiral. I feel like entering a bad depressing place and a can't talk to anyone I know about it, so Reddit seems like the best place to find help.",5.363333333333333,4.768228666666668,6.18,82.81500000000003,67.8888888888889,9.422222222222222,26.333333333333336,8.841846274778883,1.6562666666666668,136,3,29,2,2,45,29,36,0.14,0.526,0.33399999999999996,0.8176,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,6,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,3,4,6,1,6,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,2,14,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18789420265168386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243686985640468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820034562713037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23144682496152816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358721328165802,0.19197252908148205,0.0,0.0,0.2456038138730545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15271889945548156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36023265298749824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476806438407515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26256454247138084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5615072159096418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24463120326455715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159857277849218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,platypusjo,2020/03/17,"Beth Thomas’ success story and the success stories of two other nurses (podcast episode) https://open.spotify.com/episode/7rSsabZNWy0hCuef9X2UmX?si=xlYZMaslSa2EIyBaCD9u5Q
I was listening to this today and I cried, for anyone who aspires to become a nurse and struggled with a rough background, this is for you. 

I was in and out of mental hospitals as a kid and this really hits differently.",12.293448275862069,15.20751162068966,8.578793103448279,59.38301724137932,53.48275862068966,9.248275862068963,35.1896551724138,9.516144504307137,3.702158620689655,326,12,39,5,4,91,43,58,0.083,0.795,0.12300000000000001,0.5267,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,2,0,3,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,5,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,5,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,4,2,10,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,32,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24156493942138985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3815512375419923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794893011627004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3609490199315373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34815867729432554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22132085218965086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611666569102662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3274709711744326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33747997462230395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Glynch97,2020/03/17,"I don’t want to live anymore, what do I do? I’m a 22 male and I have this real lonely empty feeling all the time and I feel like I have nobody and nobody loves me, I don’t know what to do? I have nobody to talk to and the only thing going around my mind is suicidal thoughts and that I’m worthless. Any advice on what I should do it’s getting pretty scary",0.022310126582279814,1.8197084936708885,2.4511234177215178,95.07769778481016,84.31645569620251,4.456329113924051,17.469936708860754,5.148860815047168,-0.6430139240506332,277,6,64,1,8,95,49,79,0.185,0.667,0.14800000000000002,-0.6199,0,2,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,0,11,1,0,0,1,15,21,5,1,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,2,10,2,6,19,1,4,0,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,43,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252410810890874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17565497328650798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561672783097235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22994453251167496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612116284437144,0.18453179433609765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495271459524652,0.0,0.14679961075885273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419566347697442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619385279524906,0.0,0.22808637962507725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23312864279016016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608125084900291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964511557403772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627871258539138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29400549042624424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825416794891068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076142565284574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17160510958321384,0.0,0.0,0.20506381764799106,0.15061862142740104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523538674574743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon_selfharm,2020/03/17,"How to solve Anhedonia? Anhedonia is causing me so much pain now, I feel helplessly stuck in its grasps, all psychologists have been useless and I can't go to any different ines anymore, what do I do?",3.0276315789473682,5.6872799210526335,5.193947368421052,74.74513157894737,78.73684210526315,9.06315789473684,30.552631578947373,9.516144504307137,3.4944526315789486,159,8,29,5,4,55,33,38,0.266,0.691,0.043,-0.8533,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,2,1,6,9,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,1,4,0,3,7,2,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813003649255474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4102357452354832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4249388099376276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4321826315332049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20915697696803345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23509032112650935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040848640305826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4401593054785948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jiggyciggy,2020/03/17,"Would you say avoiding applying for good jobs due to not feeling good enough or ready is an anxiety problem? My anxiety has really improved over the past 6 months, in almost every area of my life.

However, I recently graduated and I am scared of applying for good graduate jobs for a few reasons: I don't feel good enough, I'm scared of standing out as someone not good enough for the role, the thought of management thinking they made a mistake over choosing me.

When it came to social anxiety, I realised similar thoughts to what I just mentioned were irrational and I overcame them. But I am unsure on whether this is a similair anxiety/irrational thought process or something else? 

Any advice would be great!",7.45523076923077,8.295014330769234,7.267500000000003,71.90125,63.38461538461538,11.423076923076925,42.403846153846146,11.20814326018867,5.226076923076923,573,34,95,16,8,182,89,130,0.165,0.6629999999999999,0.172,0.7162,3,1,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,2,0,2,11,0,3,7,0,10,1,0,2,0,26,19,8,0,4,7,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,8,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,6,3,13,6,17,10,4,13,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,3,5,64,16,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104705539254305,0.0,0.0,0.12404070441861575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423774404250907,0.0,0.2842870327254168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14167747009720205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347981988539147,0.0,0.0,0.3839811117933384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436816700437963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526760777719867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5194930899613033,0.0,0.13657018676613514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458492576468177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749501395795116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721142771373932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887407806348024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182505932387752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11852952932661752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07935608033587936,0.12736185768817904,0.12230943464057005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985086134026284,0.24803654238848785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262727083329611,0.1049570118178119,0.09536332455882472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793726811855889,0.0,0.2950234723255292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759913499075873,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,businessoflife,2020/03/17,"Covid-19 Mental health support forum Hi Everyone, not sure if I am allowed to post this here but thought it may be of use. I am trying to put together a worldwide mental health support server for those that have anxiety around the current situation with the Corona Virus.

I have created the server on Discord and I am looking for people to run as admins and in particular, anyone who has a background with Mental Health support or medically informed when it comes to the Covid-19 illness.

The server is hosted on Discord and all applications to help, please message the two admins.

[https://discord.gg/m4uVKEX](https://discord.gg/m4uVKEX)",10.869999999999996,11.907749285714289,9.21595238095238,60.15821428571431,56.14285714285714,10.428571428571429,41.30952380952381,10.125756701596842,4.648809523809524,525,25,69,9,6,160,72,105,0.11800000000000001,0.733,0.149,0.5816,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,8,0,9,5,0,2,2,18,16,8,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,1,4,4,15,13,1,10,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,3,2,53,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385404435191378,0.0,0.0,0.10406494102943112,0.0,0.0,0.13248967395101974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12820330560915075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422128205748264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4745959141163171,0.0,0.0,0.09975717521075836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497916923508055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499299111213088,0.4499549352025368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317953098994327,0.0,0.0,0.16336993220095306,0.0,0.0,0.14253737577301606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149614602333212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16729042358566812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5066693434146808,0.1402698997777898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815387842698225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010453583169995,0.0,0.14538464787897204,0.0,0.0,0.12854077214945395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AltSpaceAlt,2020/03/17,"Brain on autopilot, I'm spinning tf out idk what's going on Hi I'm 19m . I'm physically healthy with no background of any illnesses. When I'm driving sometimes I feel like I'm unaware of my surroundings and feeling dettached. Not even my own home looks familiar. It's like my brain knows how for me to get home but it doesn't feel like I'm actually doing it. Does that sound weird? Has anyone had anything similar happen to them, it's been happening to me for a while now. Happens even when I'm chilling at home or having conversations, my brain will keep talking but I'll be panicking mentally feeling detached as fuck.
 Sorry if it's a cluster fuck of text x",1.215524104378595,3.804139000000003,3.253657673595754,85.67005749668292,87.57142857142857,6.437682441397612,27.372401592215834,7.724431198458867,2.061139230429013,529,26,102,11,17,178,88,133,0.192,0.722,0.086,-0.9253,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,6,6,2,0,2,0,8,6,3,1,0,15,29,10,0,1,5,0,4,3,0,1,1,1,3,0,7,3,0,1,5,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,2,6,8,3,14,25,1,11,0,0,1,2,4,5,2,2,7,54,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.13747755533211692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580253239091037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850585332045582,0.0,0.11593139087668974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4718025750651509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328413838811125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18609846563188653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849305661735401,0.201287932510758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604806803599695,0.07360344867756413,0.0,0.08006476675020655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3737364309314341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4239392886025011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521970394543558,0.0,0.0,0.07742339909984006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20647904998792133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830285580329578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419728694070658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393329062795245,0.15770247602123874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323318186636315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LouiGP,2020/03/17,"Whats happened Recently Hi my name is Loui. If you're reading this the chances are you sorted by new and I just wanted to tell what has been the worst days of my life for me. I just hope that someone will see this and may just relate and feel not alone. 

Let's start from the beginning. I met a girl through an app called Yubo. We talked for a month before deciding to meet in person in December 2019. That day was I can say was one of the happiest days of my life and I asked her to be my girlfriend, she said yes. Over the last couple months we fell in love and met up quite. a few times. My parents didn't like her, well my dad wanted me to get rid of her and never speak again, while my step mum was dubious about the situation. Over a few weeks, my parents brainwashed me into dumping her. At first I was ok, with this and she was heart broken. It was only last Friday when she decided to hang out with a guy I was told not to worry about. They went and did the exact same thing we did on one of our dates. Same place, same meal after. This then sent me down a road of self destruction. I started having panic attacks, crying my eyes out and self harm. this was 2 weeks after we had broken up. Then Saturday night I laid in bed at night considering ending it all. I didn't because I had hope she would take me back. I then spoke to her and on Monday I asked is she had caught feelings for this new guy. She responded yes. I was broken. I didn't know what to do. I still don't. Last night again I laid in bed crying my eyes out and proceeded to punch myself in the face, calling myself worthless, useless and that I shouldn't be alive. I managed to get through today but I don't know about the rest of tonight or even tomorrow. I have no one left anymore and it makes me wonder where do I go from here. 

Any response will be appreciated.

Thank you",1.293494571938986,3.3399508250652796,2.6055414319087538,94.33385014429024,81.21932114882506,5.598158581833173,19.73952178095369,6.7183091564049375,0.0718187989556136,1438,37,322,15,38,463,202,383,0.096,0.8340000000000001,0.07,-0.6737,2,1,0,0,0,0,38.0,5,2,1,2,15,15,3,1,16,3,38,8,4,1,3,55,69,21,0,7,8,4,2,1,1,5,2,4,2,6,16,23,1,0,7,1,0,7,10,8,1,4,26,9,59,7,51,34,8,71,0,2,3,1,49,23,0,8,42,228,75,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005985127468868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06605246980742803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632793822811554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18160890889565093,0.11050063356163824,0.0,0.07468781022372173,0.0,0.05921020898995125,0.0,0.08265140084491275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19836339910835146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747370010831116,0.21338787590409908,0.1879245466420794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602931289237234,0.0,0.0,0.06415416678236546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822479192197628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261965283332694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149396785587796,0.0,0.05520183502903468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19235009376758472,0.08589269929840483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11510080555476712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19294617104886824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676141024255108,0.2375243990258549,0.0,0.0,0.10553321003634686,0.09932311711033832,0.1372131182630357,0.047453342741656634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766459810976783,0.0,0.06483575469048287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15505821363709885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491348210047903,0.1876196178340786,0.0,0.2734528354330546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974556146133304,0.0738725684242969,0.0,0.1139624023265646,0.21570515445851984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848111184943249,0.1014813124334103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331086693946594,0.09715737187586176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590523025738916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239390636500087,0.07724253879905907,0.0,0.0,0.07740090059477776,0.0,0.20265781412134592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917941122354027,0.0,0.0,0.08229885466395491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749976637042632,0.0,0.07756901140724086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303048917898422,0.07807028832921109,0.0848968511104059,0.0894252547747582,0.0,0.0,0.06452957811252727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056637917834769326,0.0,0.0920689130695747,0.09281291592191716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458086317733285,0.0,0.1558253979872581,0.0,0.08733251202964541,0.09004149060086128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533452032621143,0.0,0.09864133352525024,0.0,0.0689991372529708,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throw-away-godhelpme,2020/03/17,"Help me please. I'm becoming more and more violent every day, since the 9th of march, I'm starting to feel like I'm going to hurt someone, and I'm scared to even leave my house at this point.

In my own dreams I've seen myself do unspeakable things to make people suffer.

I'm typically a person who wants good in the world for everyone, but now all I feel is anger.

Please, I need help and I'm too afraid to get it in person because I feel like I'm going to hurt someone.",4.283233333333335,4.120609389999999,5.424000000000002,85.86033333333336,70.1,8.666666666666668,25.66666666666667,8.344100000000001,1.3323666666666665,369,9,83,5,6,123,63,100,0.17800000000000002,0.654,0.168,-0.4728,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,10,2,2,3,0,2,0,0,1,1,11,20,4,0,2,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,7,0,0,1,4,7,3,12,19,4,12,0,3,1,0,5,6,0,0,6,39,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082650871346684,0.1826716745976566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666953251647088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924536100159953,0.0,0.13935691546404844,0.1580471076788738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508941365233247,0.2363240640135141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641484812291178,0.0,0.1880016434834376,0.13872995320279358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22172871543574268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19084977892512392,0.35412895792091936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17513507229979186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16161249747443973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040600762536767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226422522428032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466776608964792,0.2888423845731797,0.0,0.3631197969590775,0.15635677820386862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559458914410596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682086588834627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802863333345726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707120806143652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988463274877606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755740265590483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Satans_butt,2020/03/17,"COVID19 and self harm? Hello
I’m a 23 year old female whose struggled with SH for a while now. My biggest triggers are anxiety surrounding being in and having control, and self hate towards myself. I guess that all somewhat ties together. 
I’m hoping fellow Redditors can give me some advice on avoiding self harm with everything going on now. I still have a job (as of today) but all I can think about is losing my income, not being able to eat, getting kicked out of my home. Then it starts turning to darker worries; what if i can’t fill my prescription, what if my diabetic dad catches covid and dies, what if society crashes all together....

Maybe valid worries, but not doing me much help stewing on it. I woke up for the first time in a few months with the urge to self harm again to gain back some control. I know other people are probably feeling the same way as me. If anyone has anyone words of advice, tips, or tricks that work for them it would be greatly appreciated. Or if anyone just wants to talk about how they’ve been  feeling feel free to message me. 🖤",4.711084142394821,6.106502762135925,5.289300970873788,81.60149190938513,69.92233009708738,7.62925566343042,28.781877022653717,8.021203637495839,1.945824983818771,843,31,155,11,15,271,136,206,0.129,0.77,0.102,-0.4607,2,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,6,9,11,2,2,7,0,15,2,0,4,3,42,32,18,1,8,12,1,3,0,1,1,1,0,1,4,10,8,1,3,5,0,1,3,3,8,0,1,2,3,17,4,27,26,9,28,0,1,0,0,13,10,0,12,14,110,27,2,0.12319316504137708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24076587018864345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424243406213263,0.0,0.0,0.2584185761420701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472793965655828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763432198426982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785505562053034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605736304469736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11071807319805176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18687049735609407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478804325093782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06436334412374199,0.1181781093905191,0.07001351468061706,0.0,0.0,0.13582089936819605,0.13571116021331148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162774571862445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825737817267664,0.0,0.12357278909321245,0.12235860974724395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225020728636105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06770374172714294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13782164009007933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12376409257087286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833160900467552,0.0,0.09056115109265517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927050339000234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854066291736263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328230681137438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5140693542764909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719675628802738,0.0,0.09838222073714242,0.0,0.0,0.12878824420505325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901799958610563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893720583653019,0.0,0.0,0.07183492522881714,0.0,0.11677271586052647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399878775714644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266252056625022,0.09778500024001148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968609137363681,0.2502172780761097,0.0,0.08751288986081485,0.0,0.0,0.07933235924007437
mentalhealth,boqolnicks,2020/03/17,"Menstrual changes with Venlafaxine? Hi ladies, my period used to be 5 days long but it's been 7 days long for a few years now. I think it's linked to the Venlafaxine but i'm not sure on the exact date that my periods started becoming longer. It's rather annoying but not a huge deal . I guess i'm more curious than anything. Have any of you ladies taking Venlafaxine noticed a change in your menstruation?  On the patient leaflet, it says :

Common (may affect up to 1 in 10 people)

* Menstrual irregularities such as increased bleeding or increased irregular bleeding.",3.4190064102564115,6.396553144230776,4.582307692307693,77.64602564102567,80.05769230769229,8.466666666666667,29.82051282051281,9.075114841892004,3.283970512820513,453,22,78,13,12,148,75,104,0.08199999999999999,0.8290000000000001,0.08800000000000001,0.1565,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,0,3,2,1,0,6,0,4,2,0,2,2,16,11,5,0,1,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,1,1,6,1,13,8,4,19,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,3,11,45,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265867377019274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847334505454935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479279552712675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4749543870327278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2895507378995679,0.2314359605293331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472974409681436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3973273821472484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555796289754727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15563083244705253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178520857222828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15889286228824795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115760854913153,0.0,0.1687860825697452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14384203163443865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938844573247408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445620934578932
mentalhealth,hehdhdvd,2020/03/17,Just want someone to talk too In Dms because privacy,3.823,6.5238273000000016,4.830000000000002,78.24500000000002,76.0,8.0,40.0,8.841846274778883,4.334000000000001,43,3,7,1,1,14,10,10,0.0,0.8740000000000001,0.126,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4223259474837265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5870092736656101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5568483721203791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4086328390859321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goingtodeletesoonn,2020/03/17,"Terrible thing I did. when I was young, like 12 or 13 i would go on omegle and other online forums looking for guys way older than me to talk to cause i was lonely and sexually confused. one time I found this guy and he liked incest. He wanted to do things with his son and daughter. I forget their ages but I know it was young. Like way young. I honestly do not remember most of what we talked about or said but I remember he told me he had his son in his room or something and was doing things to his son sexually and that he was telling his son how we wants him to have sex with me. I dont remember how it made me feel initially I just know I got super uncomfortable and left. It's been like 7 or 8 years but I cant stop thinking about how I probably contributed to that child's abuse and I feel so fucking shitty that I could participate in that especially since I've suffered from child abuse. I also struggle with pocd and it just makes things worse.",2.753356598984773,4.300775563451779,4.066697335025381,87.83628965736042,75.09137055837563,7.564593908629442,23.48001269035533,8.278499904357787,1.186746446700507,754,22,164,13,16,248,112,197,0.182,0.7170000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.9619,0,2,1,0,2,0,11.0,2,0,1,1,10,12,1,2,0,0,16,3,0,6,0,47,32,22,0,4,10,5,2,4,0,1,0,1,1,4,15,14,0,1,9,0,0,1,3,6,0,1,13,4,30,6,18,17,1,17,0,2,1,3,28,5,1,6,13,106,45,0,0.0,0.3043390568696744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10270608568389768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193383688523008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254156458119933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505199723494858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298769697536392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081777244432078,0.0,0.11873222974580523,0.0,0.0,0.07299019848376245,0.0,0.10271786446397298,0.0,0.0,0.2543334205299849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14116444715853252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13954046895596925,0.0,0.0,0.2509792584691977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078495482690732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152435351870035,0.08572857408116552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702805196469644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847015321355405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43646127155702574,0.0,0.1221671265225965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623930698553097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988723249298561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737392184438516,0.0,0.13426378535320885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064556672015158,0.11225420332377883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3412949378968633,0.08229328791798303,0.0,0.0,0.07488904784220421,0.0,0.0,0.12272115866138003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150365819099118,0.203884824488868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308819845249801,0.09123357440298442,0.0,0.0,0.0827052416027508
mentalhealth,caroline-ivyy,2020/03/17,"memory loss? over the past few months i've noticed my memory is getting progressively worse, i know it's normal as you age but i'm only 15 and i can't remember anything i did last week. it makes schoolwork really difficult and everything just so much more frustrating. i think ""oh i need to text this person"" then a second later right as i pick up my phone i forget what i needed to do. 

is this a result of my anxiety or is it normal?if so are there any ways to improve my memorization?",1.9735714285714248,4.279500438775513,4.366693877551022,81.21044897959185,80.3265306122449,8.001632653061224,23.065306122448977,8.841846274778883,1.9893763265306128,385,13,74,10,10,134,74,98,0.174,0.787,0.039,-0.9035,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,2,4,3,1,0,3,0,7,0,0,3,0,16,14,9,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,13,0,8,13,3,11,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,7,50,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151575658733888,0.0,0.17051340720106153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18342288561191886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20032288095710415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164529886628155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249679029453735,0.18168847358612095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878356941640875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17791197621122204,0.0,0.1638528396102138,0.330546361423891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4367778650706381,0.0,0.2537664560039172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16952103765267248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21277767786368326,0.0,0.1946225658361297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14279169377304682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524956102842947,0.19035037789826656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282156499952453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17692299366003514,0.17879223453906914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22714817129109266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QualitySound96,2020/03/17,work for someone who is homebound homebound due to mental illness which im working on recovering. what job opportunities are there to earn money from home or receive aid?,8.05,9.666015333333334,7.960000000000001,64.71000000000002,62.33333333333334,8.666666666666668,41.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,4.201666666666668,140,8,20,2,2,45,28,30,0.084,0.836,0.08,-0.0258,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,12,3,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37882623637778706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40794026000082895,0.0,0.3747717135992058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3805949287870497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199921736572518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5498855322409381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BOFHEY,2020/03/17,"Please wait  

Reposting some of this, hopefully this will resonate and help someone else, please, if you have no one else to talk to PM me, Wait, just wait, just until someone replies to you.

I'm a multiple suicide attempt survivor. Don't ignore the signs. I wouldn't have tried to gas myself in my car x 4 if someone had read the signs, (I'm going to my car and gassing myself, can you feed my dogs?), real subtle! If someone had reached out I would not have tried to kill myself, all those times.

I have depression, I have tried to commit suicide at least 5 times, usually triggered by emotional events in my life. I am lucky to live in a country with socialised healthcare and I am within walking distance of a hospital.

My last 2 attempts I stopped and walked to the hospital and got counseling which stopped me. I was just lonely, sad and down, triggered by some relationship stuff at the wrong time.

Please, please, this is an illness. You should not feel ashamed about your mental illness, there should be no more stigma about it than asthma or diabetes. It is an illness and needs to be treated. Your local GP, or hospital or any other health professional will not treat you like a leper, you are an ill person and will be treated like any other ill person who needs professional help.",6.9801763668430326,7.127041259259263,6.524141681363902,79.20268518518519,64.3909465020576,9.247383891828335,34.64109347442681,8.841846274778883,2.8672377425044093,1018,42,187,14,14,316,133,243,0.19699999999999998,0.684,0.11800000000000001,-0.9747,0,2,0,0,0,4,35.0,0,8,0,2,6,14,1,1,11,0,25,10,0,2,2,46,36,15,3,10,12,0,1,2,0,7,9,0,0,2,11,10,1,6,1,1,0,5,7,7,0,1,4,1,26,7,27,22,5,23,0,3,0,0,15,9,0,10,11,129,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554998609175215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847430051233866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19102004431444014,0.1286085246137316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578098802628049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497771918622144,0.0,0.09144203867363347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152996012808398,0.0,0.0,0.1532691516962674,0.0,0.0,0.11355783837508103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649182478317475,0.0,0.0,0.09319613917218664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075633230735771,0.11171403912544192,0.0,0.10095757508394086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152201350835836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695520034600261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747457109798009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996612264246305,0.0,0.5020104241768143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436330736651296,0.130135264646618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275017489801734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3874937755159352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19117395722878724,0.0,0.0,0.13088320689851207,0.25012210609202085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918960260863547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000043686097158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328725174811537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592094994047534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08121843344803549,0.1250044955607196,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,palejune,2020/03/17,"Has anyone here reported their abuser? What was the outcome? If you have any knowledge or experience I would really appreciate any advice trigger warning for assault and rape.

It's already been... I think 3 years by now? Or almost? I have PTSD so my timeline is fuzzy and I'm working to reorganize my brain. But point is it feels like it's been too long to report what happened, my bf tells me it's not but idk how the police would see it.

Ex bf did stuff like gripping my arms too hard when I'm trying to get away and leaving bruises, throwing me across the room, throwing stuff at me (left a huge welt on the back of my head once), general intimidation,  touching me inappropriately in public when I tried shrugging him off of me, and then eventually it just escalated into him well I guess raping me but there was one specific incident where I fully 100% believe turned into rape while the other incidents I feel like I didn't speak up enough. This incident involved him hurting my back and me screaming to get him to stop, I said ""stop"", and he said some straight bullshit - ""no one is going to hear you scream"". And he was fucking right, because we had screaming fights often where ik the neighbors heard and beard me crying but yeah no one did anything about it not even me. So anyway I have nerve damage on a few inch spot on my back from that specific incident. 

My stomach is getting all twisty thinking about that. It is the main reason I wanted to report him to the police and report that this was something someone did to me. Otherwise I'm paying the medical bills for it, if it can even be treated which my doc said I'd have to see a specialist if I wanted it to be looked at further, and that's extremely unfair. He also cheated on me, I believe gave me chlamydia but that's also something I'm unsure about. Overall he was not a good person, not to me at least, and very manipulative and untrustworthy. Idk if any of this is enough to report him and idk what would come of reporting him or if it's even worth it. And I would like him to have a record so future people interacting him can possibly find out what he's capable of. I feel like he's a monster walking around freely. I don't really have proof and I don't expect him to go to jail or whatever but I just want justice I guess??? As much justice as one could get in this type of situation?",4.232619288058569,5.522018298283262,5.32825549103762,81.27331481949005,70.95278969957081,7.971623327442565,28.72734158040899,8.405096225971981,2.035893915677859,1861,70,361,29,34,615,228,466,0.157,0.7440000000000001,0.098,-0.9885,0,0,2,0,2,0,48.0,1,2,1,1,30,20,7,0,15,1,36,10,4,4,2,72,69,42,0,14,21,1,6,5,3,4,2,9,2,1,30,21,0,2,8,0,3,6,9,12,1,4,17,18,55,8,48,45,8,46,0,2,3,5,37,27,1,14,18,260,85,9,0.0,0.10277960422827516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476700500309511,0.0,0.0,0.08686340182289129,0.0,0.095726162278953,0.13874119144617975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697038348131594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060654689746417426,0.0,0.07138441329593596,0.07722216520384488,0.0,0.0,0.081500547289672,0.2001065282677043,0.0,0.052879442769815314,0.0,0.0,0.19546565299965088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683701643949216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472383733911855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925947351619036,0.0,0.0952862028705073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17926322794567862,0.0,0.17188437511117494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485405082879928,0.0,0.0,0.13158386919129095,0.18591367951130408,0.0,0.0,0.07928410201470082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019510678604906,0.18128442902902828,0.0,0.09859928975092876,0.07275827274446184,0.0,0.0,0.19112058678024765,0.0,0.07670903640393813,0.0,0.07770721029024164,0.0,0.08902623082847587,0.0,0.0977688363188174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286318748143088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185129139979198,0.09424958019281766,0.0,0.0,0.21189811390209126,0.0,0.0,0.07676731522428483,0.07284463585651682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738728098831113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376815403065585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238146031045187,0.2351248329331483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060138624770910365,0.0757430984144272,0.0,0.0,0.08200283249121228,0.0977928709338956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140121391499983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114317877528312,0.08918914378252972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408045076597848,0.2475453997166391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13825036469735605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750592889170756,0.0,0.0,0.07349944628573309,0.1335623305131248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14504676862857574,0.0,0.0,0.1986064054284882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581966448374018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116642930881854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778942645630955,0.09435453541084568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715743809017964,0.15349478494316998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799490409837252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315198537251572,0.0,0.0,0.2464869482324795,0.0,0.0,0.05586145982685813
mentalhealth,thehopelessyears,2020/03/17,"Can I be screen for mental illnesses without therapy? If there a way to check my brain chemistry and see if I’m clinically suffering from any mental illnesses? I don’t know what I’m doing but I could use some guidance.

Thank you.",2.328666666666667,4.95377786666667,4.177777777777782,81.14000000000001,81.44444444444446,8.044444444444443,26.777777777777786,8.841846274778883,2.6149111111111107,184,8,34,5,5,62,37,45,0.151,0.775,0.07400000000000001,-0.3313,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,5,4,1,1,0,9,11,4,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,5,1,4,9,1,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19791417939060935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248919666597288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23236823466729364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15994554753471565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.586590839368992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319176825631262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26794646690943463,0.33282455806547245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25136130375260785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23101050259679565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805479205153916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mizarcle,2020/03/17,"Workbook Is there a workbook that you would recommend for grief related trauma, depression, anxiety and/or body image issues?",13.851052631578947,14.826418315789475,11.693684210526314,45.06578947368421,50.05263157894736,16.02105263157895,50.57894736842106,14.554592549557764,8.750221052631579,104,6,10,4,1,32,18,19,0.424,0.483,0.09300000000000001,-0.836,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.375301020268137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5449363653798952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4225455887334774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5120498829227376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485020010171168,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tabwy,2020/03/17,"My parter is stuck at home due to strict mother heavily enforcing COVID-19 self quarantine and is struggling to manage her mental health. My parter deals with a plethora of physical handicaps as well as mental health issues. And, to put it as short as possible because I am currently terrified of what id to come, she is being being very vocal about how is unable to handle the isolation and that she very well might try to end her life. Her mother has refused to let her have any visitors (the main visitor being myself), and i told my partner that she and i needed to respect that. The last thing i want to do is cause her mother stress because I know that this all comes from a place of worry for the well-being of her family. With that, my partner is now stuck at home alone dealing with being isolated with her depression and I am so incredibly terrified that she may do something and I have not even the ability to go see her for just two seconds. 

Im sorry if this is gibberish, I am very much all over the place and also deal with depression and anxiety myself which is really kicking in at this current moment. If anyone sees this and responds, please feel free to ask for more info assuming some of this is very confusing.",8.8385500575374,7.164064147679326,8.844794783275796,70.02459148446492,61.531645569620245,12.500038358266208,36.73532796317606,11.389717465364855,4.147020253164556,981,36,176,23,11,322,130,237,0.171,0.775,0.055,-0.98,2,3,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,9,9,0,3,8,0,24,3,0,2,2,36,37,19,0,4,4,3,1,0,2,2,3,0,2,3,15,17,0,1,4,0,1,4,1,5,2,2,3,3,26,5,35,27,6,19,0,2,2,0,25,8,0,7,7,137,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374930329481035,0.0,0.08782988885804782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746872117324513,0.0,0.08401857562899145,0.0,0.0,0.07679470824227094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267491185971968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390098594187222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282422217812453,0.0,0.18921522181356007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33968538098093776,0.1891904182852256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727553755253143,0.0,0.0,0.07254075210151624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353662618755392,0.0,0.05553263831799685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062418122332947426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334853243048739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203340741235208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863373078964155,0.11463252027245495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060358924313408585,0.08952496469038057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230718093016216,0.07757518565209476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213627864115883,0.11651078470717847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073665539145973,0.08143651259467716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22949501481771414,0.12055881793450104,0.0,0.1238152403868515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040807424003604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035901117333272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17503834354289313,0.0,0.1145751787680662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455141924552506,0.0,0.12294412186590176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580828609973355,0.11481669529814373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296523926428701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494593045765087,0.0,0.07456640761459836,0.0,0.10728657995984822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3624803768318196,0.06477975171528043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29624729413304085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115362708472593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Scarysauceboy,2020/03/17,"I need advice according to mental health Im 17 year old male that goes to school. I have alot mental disorders from my dads heritage and im very concerned. Iam diagnosed with adhd and nothing else. I dont know if i can self diagnose my deppression because it passes away quickly. I was deppressed for 3 days where i couldnt get up from my bed to go to the bathroom and i was very determined to commit suicide. My apetite was shit and i barely ate. My medication didnt affect my apetite before i felt deppressed. I lost alot of interest and pleasure for the days. After the days i started to feel better but the saddnes struck me some day and i was feeling down again. Some other days i feelt very much more confident in socialising with people but i dont think i ever felt manic, but ive had days where i felt extremely good and happy. And that was only the length of one or 2 days. My dad is bipolar type 2 hypermania and i suspect iam developing it. Can bipolar people have short episodes that only get to half a week? Ive had periods where i isolated myself from people in months and then being social again. Could it be my adhd or something else or am i normal. im so fucking confused of whats happening to me or whats wrong with me. Could someone etc an psychologist or someone with experience give me advice? But im still happy for any thoughts.",2.391481481481481,4.748873011152419,3.9996447748864132,84.13225802010192,79.11152416356876,6.661765110835744,25.94809307448713,7.793537801064563,1.6790230207903076,1076,43,204,18,27,358,146,269,0.084,0.7959999999999999,0.11900000000000001,0.8859,0,0,1,0,0,2,19.0,0,0,0,2,9,11,2,1,9,0,23,9,1,1,2,46,41,22,1,6,10,2,5,0,0,0,6,0,1,2,9,14,1,0,9,0,0,2,4,5,0,2,14,5,34,6,27,22,7,31,0,1,0,1,6,9,2,11,20,137,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21193891181331026,0.17232757076327918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05996215996477165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284350337607252,0.0,0.0,0.053750783783769365,0.0,0.07503060117545812,0.0,0.0,0.07798379931936943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080144536135208,0.0,0.0,0.3980599681807633,0.0,0.0,0.17899194477361988,0.0,0.0,0.1010564188607074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066813564735105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731813116843265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983386565671409,0.0,0.07975951693559269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625226553785212,0.0,0.0,0.08916806143514729,0.0,0.2539860604595903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815165519829148,0.09213580587942163,0.08458568688622145,0.05011199841595748,0.0739571746962595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797303855786775,0.1877282809876628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372611482369993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38097738972013817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048458784188479764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625364729892824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882723795522733,0.17771972605709155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038060376141969,0.0,0.06481891790184335,0.06538079387228593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639297507661656,0.0846064829333416,0.0,0.09252504021060423,0.0,0.059749797819345876,0.13412242654302986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338874510377492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923801030812152,0.0,0.0,0.0919859643695606,0.0,0.09051057615373397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988351269740917,0.1494211224096455,0.0678815771595581,0.0,0.0,0.06241086071618061,0.0,0.07041682898263278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644935788187194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05649910809198998,0.0,0.0700012598945302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182613244842469,0.0,0.0,0.07072882715761393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640573972092692,0.0,0.05678193815448286
mentalhealth,thr0w4w4y2137,2020/03/17,"Friend doesn't treat themselves My friend spends a lot of money on their family and friends, even internet friends, but they barely spend money on themselves. They buy expensive things for everyone except themselves, even their parent who really treats them poorly. I’m kind of worried about it. I think they should treat themselves more and they should be in their #1 spot but I can’t convince them, they say their friends are family will be always #1. Most of the things they want, they ignore and don’t buy them like it’s a waste of money. What do I do? Should I even try to do anything?",4.5574007936507925,6.496021446428577,4.013333333333332,88.45388888888891,71.14285714285714,7.120634920634919,24.051587301587304,7.793537801064563,1.1200861111111111,470,13,90,6,9,140,66,112,0.12,0.7170000000000001,0.163,0.5113,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,14,0,4,12,0,0,3,0,13,0,0,0,0,14,16,5,0,4,3,1,0,1,5,4,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,1,1,0,9,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,19,11,11,10,3,3,0,0,0,0,22,3,0,2,1,63,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447935258970407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319863365617627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34480366968523113,0.0,0.0,0.166277762921865,0.0,0.0,0.3280896840471771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6722136355160179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812087253189502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501441416715486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14794041657752569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19322187099612653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147777649193603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13838285788497615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312142396187555,0.11150109702144888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814403277198662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263792174578223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17671958807982005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,izziedays,2020/03/17,"How do I best help my boyfriend? I have ADHD and my boyfriend has depression, possibly caused by ADHD too but he refuses to get tested for it. We have a great relationship overall. He’s kind and supportive of me and I can tell he genuinely wants to get better but doesn’t know how. 

His depression used to be really bad but we got through it together and it’s been a bit better. Which is great! I’m so so proud of him! However, because of his depression hitting him in his teens and the way his family was ran he never really learned the be an adult. He knows how to save and stuff but getting help around the house is like pulling teeth. Getting him to do or try anything he doesn’t want to do is difficult. Which I understand because my adhd makes it hard for me to but I went to therapy and got meds. He refuses to try either and putting a strain on our relationship. 

I want him to be happy and confident that he can preform basic tasks but I’m not sure how to do that without forcing him to do things like laundry or cook very basic meals. I try to help walk him through it but he’ll just stop in the middle and make me finish. If I wasn’t the only one working this wouldn’t be an issue but I am. I work most days and he’ll volunteer to do things around the house but when the time comes he falls through. For example I asked him to do the laundry last week and he never did so now I’m putting it way while washing another load because now we have more laundry. I just want to be able to rely on him and help him gain the confidence he needs to be an adult but I don’t know how.",1.647853372434014,3.5850413454545453,3.257976539589446,90.66470674486807,79.48484848484848,7.04594330400782,24.281524926686217,8.049812674583475,1.3070527859237533,1244,45,274,23,31,411,151,330,0.076,0.71,0.214,0.9953,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,4,0,0,7,16,19,0,1,15,0,31,4,1,9,3,65,60,36,0,7,18,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,0,2,14,19,2,3,5,1,0,8,9,6,0,1,8,1,36,13,35,42,5,29,0,3,0,0,42,7,0,4,14,180,50,4,0.092049899811269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318782746998499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965223459307322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574922438490947,0.16388785308816473,0.0860542305004512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685782141552587,0.16833829364600644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660069082441086,0.1628213120546072,0.10049464987887438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456060341805247,0.0,0.07929283803225733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05936457028005621,0.0,0.2378473314762196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677645331077415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19236909372752173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14724142759490058,0.20297067901323468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798883001002774,0.08245862978796764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467964300595253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21242645105216493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960761800881902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585580563321633,0.1517646528702712,0.07503295408265273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994186285550057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12288804580641664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224668752583713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825383435001059,0.1419891148615436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06237539438224737,0.0700080967338165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377243128561067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18507114732650384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793904578298656,0.0,0.0,0.1976542873679309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695783796389027,0.0,0.0,0.10537511253832316,0.0,0.1044571354651635,0.0867559412063036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045566969861696,0.0,0.10526708266250134,0.0,0.12230772648236035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536750368256364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18748751897320884,0.0,0.0,0.09582719201760473,0.0,0.07950155870131048,0.0,0.07595080758967054,0.21717366335741445,0.14612985180005333,0.07383687726423632,0.0,0.0,0.08533117933352974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887328186097284,0.0,0.1340268467432388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheDom1nt1s,2020/03/17,"Perfectionism is making my performance worst I'm playing a game and if I don't hit perfect shots or don't get like 40 frags, my mental tells me nonstop that I suck and then my performance gets the worst it can get. Its like perfectionism is killing me, what to do except get better at the game?",3.2301694915254235,5.111544898305088,4.212,85.88172881355933,74.59322033898306,7.431864406779661,25.359322033898305,8.238735603445708,1.5081294915254242,235,8,48,4,5,76,41,59,0.307,0.5670000000000001,0.126,-0.9373,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,4,0,9,2,0,3,0,6,0,0,1,1,7,14,5,1,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,7,5,3,13,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,2,3,30,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861394601720837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6761324784623427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35794234648796824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161246615641223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21596140360825308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260460949565208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28278290605623835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mostMANICaboutMUSIC,2020/03/17,Due to covid-19 I cant get my meds filled Could really just use some positive vibes or words of advice to get me through this,3.3665384615384615,4.764211038461539,3.549230769230772,92.77076923076923,73.23076923076924,8.276923076923078,24.538461538461537,8.841846274778883,1.3909076923076922,101,3,23,2,2,31,24,26,0.0,0.865,0.135,0.5574,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,6,5,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4337970799042917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35443693411056554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4638635984722939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4930991303081814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28438887514215017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38340752548932105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zwschlei,2020/03/17,"[Podcast Episode] Mental Health & Online Community 18percent Was just on the It's Fine, I'm Fine podcast to discuss mental health and my online mental health community 18percent. [You can listen here.](https://apple.co/3d8KLiY)",8.567647058823527,13.051989882352945,6.150235294117651,63.080058823529434,76.64705882352942,6.249411764705883,33.270588235294106,7.554174236665415,3.479018823529412,192,9,20,3,5,55,25,34,0.0,0.893,0.107,0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,2,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394036875432269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7045916648705498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6680093264211601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zpazecowboi,2020/03/17,"Anyone here who lost a loved one to suicide? Hi! Any parents here who lost their child because of suicide? Specifically those who lost their only child.

I'm an only child and planning to end my life soon. As you all know, the only reason most suicidal persons hold on to life is because we don't want our parents to be sad.

I know you were devastated,but I wanna know how you guys dealt with. 

How long did you grieve? 
How painful was it? 
Was it bearable? 
How long did it take before you accepted what happened?
Did you blame yourself?
Did it make you suicidal too? Because that's one of my fears as well. My parents might end their lives too if I end mine..",1.5259487179487188,4.033305338461542,2.4946153846153862,92.61371794871798,84.07692307692307,5.005128205128205,23.28205128205128,6.42735559955562,0.5727589743589747,514,19,105,5,15,162,79,130,0.268,0.68,0.052000000000000005,-0.9869,3,0,0,0,0,3,18.0,2,7,3,4,10,10,0,1,3,0,11,4,0,6,1,20,23,8,5,3,1,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,5,10,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,7,1,2,10,0,19,3,11,11,2,7,0,5,0,1,25,1,0,3,6,70,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766061852307236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876783063506261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060120499956221,0.0,0.09585725622620307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993246504446601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12676310188209713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154168008604562,0.09961644207406292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572926324431868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15913672243276547,0.0,0.0,0.09947243234419648,0.19938424907208716,0.0,0.0,0.3689138986210559,0.0,0.1016714509018798,0.0,0.07519506610234787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950435084694695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526697531221773,0.2570272849757053,0.11986804672451945,0.0,0.3752550600873885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983620487158599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582344912354435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4928853383283002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469913688082069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644416820483416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10128630485298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jazzthesithlord,2020/03/17,"Had an argument over my self esteem with my boyfriend and haven’t heard from him in over 2 days. It has taken a real toll on me. I don’t really want to go into the details of the argument. But I’m worried and sad and can’t sleep not knowing what he’s thinking or what to do. That on top of being stuck in the house with this corona mess is driving me insane. He’s pretty much my best friend and the only person I turn to for all of my problems. He listens and he’s caring and is just an all around amazing person. But, not knowing when or if I’ll hear from him is just making my chest tighten up and I can’t stop crying when I’m alone. I’ve never really felt this alone until all of this hit at once. 

I’ve never been in a silent treatment before, and I can’t really talk to him first because I don’t think he’ll respond. I’m fine with wanting a break, I just wish he had told me that before disappearing. All of this is just making me feel so alone and anxious. It almost makes me feel like I’ve lost the one thing I cared about and the one thing that cared about me. But no stupid old me had to have a low self esteem and run him off. I probably deserve this amongst other things. Good job me.",2.1489299610894967,3.3112385525291863,3.700877431906616,91.41637451361868,75.92607003891051,6.229494163424125,21.41031128404669,6.508806274219699,0.22612700389105056,936,22,211,7,20,311,132,257,0.158,0.7090000000000001,0.132,-0.5058,1,3,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,4,10,15,1,0,12,0,18,2,2,3,6,51,48,21,0,5,12,0,3,1,1,1,0,3,0,4,16,16,0,1,7,0,0,4,11,6,0,3,10,6,25,9,31,35,6,28,0,3,0,0,21,14,0,4,10,140,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196372060519204,0.34741101106669897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263159075116139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953652226331243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815965103588174,0.0,0.1902878147304669,0.0,0.11733995694876435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34199982747493723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282040044293555,0.07210958908777734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307116888593023,0.07987862487789918,0.10735720194980962,0.0,0.0,0.09510736073877013,0.0,0.0,0.08638579251465721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354542360689637,0.09378272955377713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602042337478492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901621307526426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095630955652286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12289807096384114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05462577040230224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220561738637724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22390644230463733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219479817236053,0.0,0.17247285172453933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173280463817166,0.11907629443742627,0.15153361801063994,0.08503818126666131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19526011946747435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137531574130466,0.1205524128671141,0.10698913044062523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272667096003342,0.21488918614322533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332889230732117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11189290300703343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347996703219166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987037370012972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228490796100205,0.14328942650884427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684130437597557,0.0,0.0,0.12161951545614688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318994103007227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857845854989924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11355066947890895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,msshanh,2020/03/17,"Mental Health app Moodspace free due to Coronavirus COVID-19 I though this could be helpful for those finding it difficult, specially those in quarantine.

[https://twitter.com/MoodSpaceApp/status/1239942338434215941](https://twitter.com/MoodSpaceApp/status/1239942338434215941)",31.7316,40.39552956,12.885000000000002,24.94750000000002,13.400000000000004,13.0,48.5,12.161744961471696,7.5306000000000015,249,9,17,5,2,50,24,25,0.084,0.7090000000000001,0.20600000000000002,0.5574,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,11,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35589593784474394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4074083791021632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4738125159172659,0.0,0.0,0.29877752901908433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4492122109703904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379481379015697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,t0riz0,2020/03/17,"My psychiatrist fights my refills. Hi, everyone

This is a rant more than anything, but if anyone has any input or advice it would be appreciated. 

I have chronic depression and bipolar disorder. I take an antidepressant and mood stabilizer. These meds have worked wonders for my mental health and I have been taking them for the past few months.

But, every time I try to get a refill of my medication through my doctor's office (which is also a formulary), my psychiatrist tries to talk me into going to a different clinic and getting my prescription filled elsewhere. This is because I don't have insurance. He shames me for not having health insurance and I don't understand why. I pay for my medication and appointments out of pocket because it's cheaper than paying for insurance.

I am on day three without my medication and the withdrawals are causing my mental health to deteriorate. It is a fight every month to get my refill and I'm sick of it. My doctor does not advocate for me and I feel like I'm doing something wrong by having to take medication for my mental health.",5.771122278056952,7.645333281407042,6.95786934673367,68.80752428810722,67.94472361809045,9.728777219430489,31.85963149078727,10.047579312681364,3.593387671691792,869,37,140,22,15,293,114,199,0.135,0.82,0.045,-0.9615,1,0,1,0,2,0,18.0,0,0,1,1,1,7,2,1,8,0,19,14,0,1,0,23,31,14,0,2,7,0,1,1,0,1,14,0,0,0,8,11,0,0,3,0,2,2,5,5,0,1,1,1,26,1,24,28,2,10,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,3,6,104,34,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616988653913197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688602690166443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388458726486775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596943561009682,0.0,0.08940831470942373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324620219605216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161175917199924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006918189972057,0.0,0.09357864382155058,0.0,0.0,0.11351437586057415,0.12452039423489095,0.22241233059330032,0.09507888208991297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183081800928051,0.10381813133910336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054935858049600175,0.07761838567206264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170292797834079,0.0,0.0617473473630033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46195235887146996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05308008395488231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068379697003655,0.4378070315049338,0.32847587419135704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17344411420201564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371712080589136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364278929025942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450700586884268,0.08732740876563427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335371251012374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14753016273158634,0.0,0.0,0.11310673886368168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803821488309053,0.0,0.0,0.10473310896227854,0.11782447472039495,0.07909727518951629,0.0,0.0,0.07718065338708059,0.11878988838010045,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hestia17,2020/03/17,"Feeling incapable I’m struggling a little bit. I have ADHD and anxiety so you can imagine those two don’t mix very well. Something that I struggle with a lot because of the adhd is motivation literally to do anything and everything. Lately (it comes in waves) I haven’t really been taking care of myself. Haven’t been showering like I should be, my room is a mess still have to fold laundry, etc. Today I got into an argument with my mother because I hadn’t taken a shower in a couple days and she can’t understand why I have such an issue with doing basic things even though it’s motivation related and I’ve told her that. Now I just feel like I’m not capable of doing anything by myself. I don’t really know what I’m looking for making this post. I think I just needed to vent in a safe space. Thanks",2.548333333333332,4.6523786481481535,4.71953086419753,80.46188888888892,77.33333333333334,7.529876543209879,24.38024691358025,8.447377352677275,1.8428587654320991,639,22,119,13,15,221,104,162,0.105,0.7490000000000001,0.146,0.7486,2,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,2,9,9,0,2,9,0,19,0,0,3,0,25,37,6,0,2,3,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,8,9,0,1,8,0,0,1,7,3,1,1,6,3,18,6,15,29,3,14,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,1,7,86,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36063128417869866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477810101342355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469357786993701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18292265460556112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638018397182699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15297299640277845,0.0,0.0,0.1292438230475084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16601338569359475,0.0,0.09676162698887998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16733121680578913,0.09909820191506018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484382397380998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517267038315648,0.1071866557915257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11999851112401973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15659992915560805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245655987430786,0.0,0.1692485759203251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466012630640187,0.15037676092000227,0.0,0.0,0.12599351909449066,0.0,0.0,0.12755632171880313,0.0,0.0,0.10015104289997416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112507347190432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14369423069500778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19223543439531451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550602073813915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981995777239725,0.0,0.0,0.31370306274057946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128093548025619,0.0,0.0,0.13813416023369846,0.0,0.0,0.09967809546934453,0.09613782448837613,0.14741085616561542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422177887278988,0.14336704135769185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656461169245388,0.1561940896001794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379646106803988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349015246386482,0.0,0.13538529952796693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ayoitsjo,2020/03/17,"Self Isolating is what I do when I'm incredibly depressed... and now it's required of me Honestly, I'm terrified. I've been in a bad place lately for a lot of reasons, and one of my major tells when I'm getting really bad is I start to ignore everyone and hole up in my room and do nothing all day. I love it, in a way. I'm a recovering agoraphobe. But it also eats away at me. I don't do anything productive, anything that needs to be done. Anxiety starts to gnaw at me; if no one can see me or interact with me, maybe they'll realize how bad I am and start to hate me. I wallow in my own depression and filth and laziness. If I could survive without working or interacting with anyone I think I absolutely would, but I would also be incredibly depressed.

Now, with this virus, it's required to self isolate. It's been 4 days for me, and I'm not sure if I can take it any more. I asked one of my friends if I could hang out, just the two of us no big gathering, and she shamed me and called me ""selfish"" and that I could handle being ""a little lonely"" for a while for the sake of the world. I know she's right but she doesn't get how hard this is for me. I'm not doing well. I've spent the morning crying, wondering how I'll get through this without ruining any and all progress I've made and reverting back to where I was 5 years ago, when the agoraphobia was at its worst. I don't know what to do. I'm so scared..",2.611081818181816,3.53011729,4.596181818181822,86.3980909090909,74.43333333333334,8.254545454545456,26.96969696969697,8.710501217029153,1.7747333333333335,1097,40,249,21,22,378,150,300,0.177,0.778,0.045,-0.9887,0,2,0,0,0,0,39.0,1,0,1,5,15,19,1,2,11,0,28,2,0,5,3,54,53,32,0,10,14,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,14,17,1,3,6,0,1,1,9,14,1,4,7,2,36,5,34,37,7,34,0,5,1,1,15,17,0,8,15,174,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764960769306677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761887677456983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498242565554254,0.0,0.08427159307776101,0.0,0.0,0.07702597140060229,0.0,0.18130350018998506,0.0,0.10298411186765724,0.0,0.10349832553613053,0.08470573222428855,0.2759353409773191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248500202135407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263859806154261,0.0,0.12100486158383475,0.14208732124249612,0.0,0.2846402326733061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273125065324464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272050545675315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526196951668462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510883231408004,0.0,0.17266112444243284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868113055166146,0.1087595412424067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108138397423104,0.0,0.12426453298160164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040859791817002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365353097387263,0.09942310466450628,0.1042354304274167,0.0,0.0,0.11066986279126373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168175429865916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570085711309037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22394045785408268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509306339287495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705708935740013,0.11326214785630995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407547389822428,0.0,0.0,0.11028871613412497,0.0,0.08778273107835292,0.0,0.2298404315871904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23391404212122036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382387364822254,0.0,0.08282611368674274,0.0,0.09628411805490733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058565661160511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076096677597238,0.0,0.13250812166750878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743935607501574,0.0,0.0,0.09904647567385837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123793441622581,0.119463104434304,0.08019731103285321,0.0,0.0,0.15650806808634368,0.0,0.0,0.07093900282085956
mentalhealth,XxSkinnyBitchxX,2020/03/17,"how to structure daily life during the Quarantine? school is officially cancelled here indefinitely, meaning i have no reason to wake up before noon anymore. what do people do to keep their lives feeling structured and purposeful when there seems to be nothing to look forward to?",9.452269503546097,11.084385148936171,8.34553191489362,63.13333333333336,59.21276595744681,9.670921985815603,41.19858156028369,9.725611199111238,4.6155304964539,230,12,30,4,3,71,41,47,0.09300000000000001,0.8759999999999999,0.031,-0.4696,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,5,2,1,2,0,8,10,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,7,9,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,2,3,22,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30998968915295233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659776854695771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15804694502492586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778303771515769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207804540430359,0.0,0.0,0.2760088110649072,0.0,0.26248366678985724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34048501928717073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29992344661756704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21669964521012414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32137841342221257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163418534013833,0.0,0.2845558800929997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thebrokenwindow,2020/03/17,"I feel like everything is falling apart. I have been experiencing a large amount of anxiety recently.  and depressive symptoms. My mom died last year from drug related reasons , and it has been very hard since. Though recently its been particularly hard
I finally confronted my dad about going to therapy, and he was okay with it. But because of COVID19 many of the offices near me have closed. 

My girlfriend has been distancing herself from me, and barely seems to show any interest or sympathy for me at all.

Ive had 4 friends in the past week become hospitalized from suicide attempts.

I don't know how to cope with everything going on. Once I finally reached out for help , I am not able to get it. I have no motivation for school anymore even though I am graduating this year, it has become very hard for me to do any school work.

I am not suicidal, but all of this has affected me physcially. mentally, and socially. I feel like I've caused distress with my friends, especially with my girlfriend. 

I just dont know how to handle my emotions anymore. I'm constantly crying, and I feel like people don't respect me anymore because of it.

If anyone has any guidance please offer it.",4.548246411483255,6.8471104227272725,5.3921531100478495,77.02691387559811,72.04545454545455,9.177033492822966,33.39712918660287,9.682069395223575,3.6223181818181818,943,48,166,25,19,307,125,220,0.131,0.742,0.127,-0.0019,0,0,1,0,0,1,26.0,0,0,0,3,7,11,1,1,3,1,23,2,0,6,2,33,33,14,3,1,7,2,6,3,4,0,2,0,0,0,9,12,0,0,8,1,0,3,6,3,0,0,6,7,26,8,28,27,3,20,0,1,0,0,11,7,0,3,13,109,35,5,0.1015165004650892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20710410439618016,0.0,0.07765984499291248,0.0,0.3020312704918861,0.07098269750139406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12376703288285412,0.22423399803463054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428540998469013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970327260525756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151110891327548,0.0,0.0,0.08743601309699603,0.0,0.10535810009432067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189765824896405,0.0,0.117726911183673,0.0,0.0,0.11419239927581502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705069113227319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824729695925696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398937859409442,0.21757022464864686,0.0,0.2224127283443285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15686279287352106,0.0,0.0530381815539684,0.0,0.11538833332596292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728165336317741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804437038575946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115816275395364,0.08274949710587441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487875029922133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029217978268051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230475553308006,0.0,0.0,0.11889489841223112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811175985515886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690898652538704,0.07037875930303494,0.0,0.0,0.11143463267772248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437587002738864,0.2004705943348124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20548023635593626,0.0,0.09241680933030366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397549822729185,0.0,0.0,0.10348328794980174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22208514942809807,0.0,0.0,0.10551451395702814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609296553257245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19947889255904927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16752348910339127,0.0,0.0,0.08143041329218201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390522139427014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307465959006196
mentalhealth,bones_are_cool,2020/03/17,"Tips on avoiding the coronavirus while having cuts I did it again. I promise i didnt mean to i just got really really sad all of a sudden. I will have school in monday, i know its still kind of far so my cuts will heal by then but im sure i'll do it again(my mental health has been really shit this week) so how can you protect your cuts from the virus?",0.4247368421052649,2.437888578947369,2.2439473684210505,95.89513157894736,84.26315789473685,5.905263157894738,16.07894736842105,7.1686216300943375,-0.21160000000000026,276,5,65,4,8,91,59,76,0.191,0.7090000000000001,0.1,-0.7488,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,6,9,4,1,3,0,10,3,1,1,2,8,13,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,4,0,9,3,7,7,1,10,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,7,43,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102829048200392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794740078970461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28400109783575145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27379301575198656,0.1444951672268391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2863993582789551,0.0,0.0,0.26496374151946195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5053040888841991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660913070437258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698858639594284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20997001162584175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247801065573068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21090033270639186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gingerbreadcookie93,2020/03/17,"Mental health going downhill fast I swear I can't go on anymore! Too many expectations in my life and because of the coronavirus situation, this is going to cause a significant delay and by then I'll be screwed anyways. I wanted to get started on something in June but now it may not be until the end of the year or maybe even next year. 

I feel like I've not only disappointed myself, but I've disappointed everyone else too. I'm just a huge failure that can never be happy! 

And it doesn't help that everyone is talking about the coronavirus at my job (I work at a grocery store) and I really want to go on a mental leave for 3 months but I can't cause even people at home talk about it too so that doesn't help the situation, otherwise I would just take that leave and get away from it all for 3 months. 

Any tips on how to be calm during this difficult time cause I feel like at the end of the day, who knows how long it'll be before I decide to just end it all.",3.1346666666666683,4.323583800000005,4.714000000000002,85.0136666666667,73.5,7.9333333333333345,24.333333333333336,8.447377352677275,1.3737333333333341,760,22,163,13,15,256,108,200,0.124,0.768,0.109,-0.2854,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,15,8,1,0,11,0,15,3,0,5,3,32,29,14,0,4,9,0,2,2,0,3,2,0,1,0,13,5,0,1,4,0,1,4,7,4,0,0,0,2,13,4,26,21,2,35,0,2,0,1,5,12,1,2,21,105,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880939975049027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149320685977797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888278170986086,0.0,0.0,0.07064567067974167,0.0,0.09861413673273772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3571538830111625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747396767167253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681150159174708,0.0,0.30793330800928803,0.0,0.0,0.15308894248319205,0.0,0.0,0.22147635703022409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171952678613878,0.1655841525510147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109583045625635,0.0,0.26345258528240995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12336741329466068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318600354858725,0.0,0.0,0.15535769323750726,0.0,0.11624745203006386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500327225330233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636902956260472,0.0,0.0,0.2454222565084476,0.0,0.0,0.08185676871530706,0.1132363246530316,0.0,0.0,0.10255929688802368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174946068541763,0.11642741512716395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335803937451486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18500511455135354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938176838459291,0.0,0.1232506827379314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881398196391311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034376419570441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424231416580157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605311773723118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921803939691914,0.0,0.0,0.08202777341315506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713510686973859,0.1862965178898102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757658450454787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671024075595076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436954188074912,0.0,0.0,0.08232516673580624,0.0,0.0,0.14925914827795836
mentalhealth,edie19961996,2020/03/17,Help I just want to die my whole life I’ve been unhappy I feel like I’m going completely crazy,-0.8842857142857135,1.2519024761904802,1.7495238095238117,94.98714285714287,95.66666666666666,6.609523809523811,16.523809523809526,7.793537801064563,0.5706380952380954,76,2,18,2,3,26,18,21,0.349,0.409,0.242,-0.5984,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,1,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4263847139469929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4220582218464342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20562406767800184,0.29052441802364115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23111936691047436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27258166145710405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2872423444626875,0.19867793392137936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398639152454996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4540314204626603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sy3Zy3Gy3,2020/03/17,"Just as seasonal depression started going away, pandemic depression set in :( This winter was terrible for seasonal depressions (on top of that always lingering depressions) and now that it was finally starting to go away the world has gone crazy and now we have a new type of depression (and extreme fear) to deal with. I wish things could just be better, for everyone!",11.02041666666667,10.006603125000003,10.245625,59.603541666666686,56.8125,16.03333333333333,44.77083333333333,14.554592549557764,7.060683333333335,296,15,45,12,3,95,50,64,0.276,0.636,0.08900000000000001,-0.9485,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,2,4,8,0,1,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,9,12,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,3,0,2,1,12,7,0,19,0,5,0,0,2,6,0,0,9,34,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140996385969373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193426081155292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15030478462719318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568927844593412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520844686613984,0.7318778170697143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16239215323875347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19123822581422856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18616921831578684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19317020188519946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16413638892425558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405794808720825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290559113666498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19543127881105388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SmokeAttackJ,2020/03/17,"I can't get myself to go into work. For some reason, every morning I drive all the way to work and get here 5 minutes early at minimum. I'm ready to head in, then I just can't get myself to get out of the car, and I end up sitting in there for 20+ minutes.

I don't know exactly why. Part of it might just be because I'm tired and hungry in the morning and don't have time to get something to eat. I work fast food and I haven't beem written up or anything yet, but this has been going on for a couple weeks since I first started. Could I get some advice on either how to get myself out of the car, or advice on what might be causing my problem?",3.9963380281690135,3.1946002887323965,5.542359154929578,86.94128521126764,70.76056338028171,7.663380281690142,27.609154929577464,5.985473137389443,0.995828169014084,499,14,115,2,8,171,82,142,0.043,0.943,0.013999999999999999,-0.5789,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,0,5,0,13,4,1,3,2,26,27,10,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,8,2,0,2,0,0,5,5,1,0,1,2,0,13,0,25,20,5,28,0,0,0,0,0,12,0,6,9,80,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28666972277461616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070586880607255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894153049216829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068167209744218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711274965817893,0.1622996072835523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009116237865786,0.0,0.0,0.12991572527264392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358497034320876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476668427009367,0.17736710613086482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5364429518868515,0.0,0.1667242523057217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15053690354127947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061197733930213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112104744554877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15884110249694572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14035379548258062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15081237753834534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133594229491702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292211002362038,0.0,0.0,0.10382148405149508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553080253752521,0.16858809754413082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642845760637252,0.11765855680342152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235668228530628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203562896685687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FanboiRyu,2020/03/17,"COVID-19 Anxiety I know pretty much everyone in every part of the world is dealing with this right now, I know I'm not the only one. But like, there is so many things changing because this Coronavirus and it's not helping the slightest. I'm stressed out 24/7, not sure what will come next. Every day, every hour there seems to be new news about COVID-19. My work even just switched to to-go only model. Just lots of things happening at once. Sorry for the rant.",3.4487921348314607,5.653660887640456,3.333019662921348,90.981327247191,74.95505617977528,6.247752808988763,25.73174157303371,7.1686216300943375,1.1038640449438202,365,13,72,4,8,110,67,89,0.126,0.812,0.062,-0.4497,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,8,3,0,1,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,16,11,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,3,2,10,9,3,11,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,6,43,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161752219208472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048798783888521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18200573175186488,0.14820555138959704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095780009517396,0.17737564911442508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136371805648336,0.0,0.4348777875881009,0.16440082716913645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977797890507226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214294984899965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11532126326174705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16943426247097784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18910799191337774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405477536372337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14627047194831874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744313552358373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647629947482011,0.0,0.0,0.16616663779332888,0.1829767697372012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18322727727901506,0.11658530514198287,0.2617030449572407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18631302021082805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17503636146182242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692947316309826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566275525538714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192595513158022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19708230904555016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215477238402046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286043038988221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12525420463894854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mattbryan26780,2020/03/17,How do I tell my parents? So I’ve been feeling depressed for quite a few months now and I’ve gone to a counselor about it and she said i was showing many symptoms of depression and anxiety so i was gonna go to my university’s doctor but because of corona my uni has closed down and I’m flying back home. I haven’t told my parents about this yet and I’m not sure how or what to tell them now that I don’t have an official diagnosis or anything yet. It’s not that they won’t understand but I really would have liked for it to be confirmed before telling them because in my own head I’m still not sure if I’m being dramatic or if it’s an actual problem.,2.315899419729206,3.5338242907801423,4.3055448098001285,87.02454545454546,75.59574468085106,7.68046421663443,27.002578981302385,8.296473431620573,1.6760014184397156,519,20,115,9,11,178,83,141,0.10800000000000001,0.85,0.042,-0.7788,2,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,3,1,12,6,0,0,4,0,13,3,1,2,2,24,24,16,0,4,10,2,1,1,0,3,2,1,1,0,8,6,0,0,2,1,0,2,6,3,0,0,6,2,15,3,12,13,2,12,0,2,0,0,11,3,0,5,8,79,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.16149086409108845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659665040585796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13618121476433204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12724883413412486,0.0,0.20175795863449086,0.0,0.14081674593971366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28506640423844865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16938235250937692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367490101596703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940497402249174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698367991041805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16599636178959934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084830070068091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16777724523930693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320896733291432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675061477816644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583481445820211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760151667595332,0.0,0.0,0.10601483152659796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741547155856628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321576604929438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119379652381246,0.17200374321351006,0.0,0.0,0.4339272483594532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812935615966706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17227718860989513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755679735958235,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gen3r4lmeow,2020/03/17,"Obsession My insecurity is taking over and I see myself spiralling. My partner is going to be working closely with an attractive girl and I can't stop feeling insecure and jealous. I keep on thinking about the various possibilities. I guess it's because I met him at work too and know how long the hours can be and people do get close (there's not a lot of staff). I know the girls name and I can't stop searching for her online, just so I can see... It's ridiculous and I hate myself for it, but for some reason I can't stop. My mental health is not doing very well anyway, I have been dealing with depression and not feeling my best, there's also the stress of university. I want to throw myself into something that makes me happy and feel good as a person, something where I'm not thinking about what I look like, but I don't have the time at the moment. I'm venting on here instead of searching for the girl at work, I will try and put a stop to these behaviours today, just wanted to get this off of my chest.",3.7608455284552846,4.951350873170732,4.936097560975611,84.01504065040652,71.97560975609754,7.222764227642276,26.83739837398373,7.554174236665415,1.4156276422764225,799,27,160,9,15,264,117,205,0.135,0.746,0.11800000000000001,-0.5454,0,0,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,4,15,14,3,4,11,0,17,2,1,3,0,44,40,16,0,2,8,0,3,1,1,1,1,0,0,5,7,15,0,5,8,0,0,3,8,8,1,0,2,6,26,6,25,35,4,23,0,1,3,0,10,11,0,3,10,119,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096274495065458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356621968942778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14386306959767706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14132942075404265,0.11807178226769105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20794406946173555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14324332509002688,0.0,0.07790900846302956,0.11498104907901315,0.0,0.0,0.15101544291581706,0.0,0.0,0.14593036293240755,0.0,0.13534382774180145,0.0,0.14571577474110992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350018804185693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184814082903488,0.0,0.0,0.15067752022622094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697318810713855,0.0,0.0,0.12131660231227025,0.11511753007081307,0.0,0.0,0.11654542873887165,0.0,0.0,0.09150582327980396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13815022428860255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503801980860983,0.11969801628982026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15454362051611156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780907321227298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14094701443218086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21847923773957564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21107066317769235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4584394047123388,0.1570312989259789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307144674650807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756780663167797,0.0,0.0,0.07993582129283393,0.0,0.12994129133110566,0.0,0.0,0.09307224672532266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131101260769808,0.1617134907614712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325658042412105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29940024366948964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eljapo425,2020/03/17,"is it normal hearing some kind of light switch noise out of nowhere? I dont know what this might be, but I frequently hear switching noises anywhere I go, is this normal?",6.08818181818182,6.4599634242424235,5.505606060606059,84.9784090909091,66.27272727272728,7.8121212121212125,31.65151515151515,7.1686216300943375,1.858951515151516,135,5,26,1,2,41,27,33,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,9,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,3,7,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,1,17,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234454407359739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15684527806829224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6220969890381516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873897557750104,0.15167089162569072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29277020426656303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5408018289976657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asci_ana,2020/03/17,"Volunteering opportunities during COVID for mental health I would like to volunteer during COVID to help people dealing with mental health issues. I'm not a trained psychologist and I am looking for efforts to tackle the mental health issues with evidence based approaches. 

Are there any organized efforts led by mental health professionals? So far I haven't been able to find anything.

Thank you!",8.648636363636362,11.267901742424247,7.794363636363637,62.69154545454549,61.87878787878788,10.128484848484847,34.41212121212121,10.355215969177356,4.298252121212121,329,14,43,8,5,102,48,66,0.0,0.841,0.159,0.8622,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,3,2,3,0,0,2,0,5,4,0,1,0,7,8,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,4,3,9,6,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,24,4,1,0.14752406712560626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032142446123016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213997373792246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15209083544645033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483432472898538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6272447392725408,0.0,0.0,0.09888227252042096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3079535962464315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207280746911014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238830614997834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5946782465268694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227461313255476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582034052575712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479686461376693,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rebellionxroses,2020/03/17,"Is it normal for the brain to forget certain traumatic memories? Recently I’ve realized that I have no memory or can’t recall certain traumatic memories and I can only remember them when something triggers me.

Usually when something like that triggers me I would start choking on air, I feel like there’s a knot tied in my throat and I would start crying.

Is that normal?",4.866521739130434,7.276173840579716,5.99644927536232,72.55380434782613,71.46376811594203,9.817391304347826,33.23913043478261,10.125756701596842,4.16388695652174,301,15,47,9,6,100,49,69,0.233,0.648,0.11900000000000001,-0.8677,0,0,2,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,7,2,2,2,2,15,10,5,0,4,1,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,9,4,4,8,0,9,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,8,33,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598494292969963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25568802454018463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769601670662845,0.16629165614474462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22744031566058476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4561323359193203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770328422651988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22983329079674603,0.0,0.2636841784775965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583969915171653,0.0,0.0,0.329513038067744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25636438201454304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307076941356866,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Michelle5882,2020/03/17,"what the fuck is wrong with me? I've been diagnosed by a doctor with depression, anxiety, and OCD- but I feel like I have something else that just isn't explained by these.

I'm incredibly sensitive. if someone is even slightly rude to me, I'm thinking about it all day. if someone is just straight up mean to me or yells at me, i get like devastated by it. I'll cry for hours, even if i dont know the person who said it. I have a lot of self esteem issues because of this. I have almost like PTSD symptoms regarding these really stupid encounters. If someone is cruel to me, i will remember it forever and it will come up when I'm trying to sleep, and i end up not being able to sleep until i'm literally exhausted. 

I always feel like I'm in a fog. I can't think well and there are times where I can't think of the words for what I want to say. Talking is like a chore, and I;m constantly pausing to get my thoughts straight and think of the words I need to use to get my point across. Also I make a lot of stupid mistakes with fact checking and stuff and I feel like I'm a fucking idiot every time.

whenever someone is talking to me, I zone out. I'll start to think about something else, like trauma in my past. People get mad at me because I don't really listen to them. I can get the gist of what they're saying, and if someone is like ""ok then what did I just say?"" i can summarize what they were saying but I never get the important details. Also sometimes, I will ask someone something and they will give me an answer, and then I will ask them the same question a few minutes later because i dont remember what they said. 

It's almost impossible for me to get started doing chores. It will take hours for me to get up the drive to do it, and I'm miserable the whole day because i dread doing it. 

Some doctors have said I might have BPD or bipolar but I just dont feel like I fit those? maybe BPD when I was a young teen, because I got angry very easily when I felt someone was being rude to me, but I don't lash out anymore like I did back then. However, I do still feel extremely low when I get yelled at and it drives to me having ""S-word"" thoughts, and in the past they have made me attempt to actually do it. (don't worry about that happening to me now though, I'm in a place where I'm very happy, and I don't have to interact with the public)

Obviously I'm not looking for a diagnosis from you guys, but if you guys have any ideas of what it could be I'd like to talk to a doctor about it and get their opinion.",4.348989839319472,4.272681741020797,5.623917178638943,84.18583796077505,69.9640831758034,8.805316635160679,29.007620510396976,8.567472430010655,1.897588327032136,1967,66,432,29,32,662,220,529,0.149,0.748,0.10300000000000001,-0.983,1,0,3,0,0,0,55.0,0,2,7,1,24,31,9,2,23,1,51,11,2,3,4,84,108,40,0,10,19,0,6,11,0,7,7,10,2,4,28,23,0,0,21,0,1,3,13,17,1,0,14,17,62,14,61,83,7,51,0,3,1,2,32,22,2,16,37,287,90,3,0.05969798099049337,0.0,0.05825661790943421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955780921298274,0.0,0.0,0.09548090765962217,0.049673502489638144,0.0,0.0,0.04059667420453192,0.0,0.04566879205716793,0.0,0.059204355816552826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161910718209284,0.0,0.0,0.04590406244523747,0.0,0.18195667557589054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15037503446126074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0514245246028227,0.0,0.06451230935443597,0.0,0.04766398015198467,0.0,0.0655754289168276,0.07700051809624553,0.0,0.05141778355080349,0.06059219407272305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18331023949145603,0.0,0.0,0.20989676734048704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974000567989938,0.0,0.0528746918580571,0.0,0.0,0.07885990683830592,0.0,0.050298123737298236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15092546456211312,0.17059299819131635,0.057319423644446976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037964293052246,0.3118973112423236,0.057267743105050374,0.0,0.0,0.047745928912447236,0.0,0.0,0.11822077376757915,0.052790727434283424,0.06354961084382606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758097206622604,0.0,0.0,0.0673917540750465,0.0,0.062309182131688026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03280844911529576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32081959855505976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05013126871130383,0.0,0.0,0.10150617723622987,0.0,0.0564876730499986,0.03984886587357385,0.0,0.05997464585896509,0.06502860236147155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06333012383720492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04426529647408035,0.046042763203658035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397695564555135,0.04138706334200265,0.05212597434242901,0.0623716840675074,0.0,0.05643388812873349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978374512624443,0.0,0.06687540123413056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648811055335569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352523500726737,0.0,0.1703593518661504,0.18989692234058916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622780138189599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194821883168228,0.0,0.3540733389618209,0.13787526703784928,0.0590428296730193,0.0,0.0845090764177862,0.0,0.04767488473403377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833990561729861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204906019779509,0.04488545219944836,0.1439489274024891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19126027859942893,0.05865296321995475,0.09478705715453227,0.06962074558800542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04053101041415493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051559888167139516,0.0,0.09851417279099947,0.03521141590954655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053675654349751134,0.0,0.0,0.06665066383807762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606261975048028,0.0,0.0,0.06527037066704634,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SanityWho,2020/03/17,"Self Worth Help? i’ve always had issues with my self worth and now i finally want to work on it and heal myself. however, a major obstacle that i’m currently dealing with is the fact that i suppressed these emotions and now i don’t know how to bring them back to the surface. 

i know that i’m good enough and that i’m worth something but it’s still there. what’s something that you think would help me bring this issue back to the surface to heal and address it once and for all? i know that this will be a long process so any advice is appreciated!",3.0208751229105215,4.5295456991150465,3.8217109144542754,90.0256243854474,74.30973451327435,6.792133726647003,24.944936086529,7.3871296695380915,0.9672092428711898,436,14,94,5,9,139,68,113,0.016,0.82,0.16399999999999998,0.9217,2,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,1,1,8,1,0,0,5,0,7,2,0,1,2,19,17,9,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,13,8,0,1,4,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,10,1,9,13,3,13,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,8,61,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17925042307059985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15263249892437553,0.0,0.0,0.12474199565752385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821001705389595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891132869842989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20633952884878715,0.0,0.18953724653295814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009439238845281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385645831010164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459050412330477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3829166738011862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024330069343549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162334079533006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19535214018619265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3827251311387802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824342354657776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649131686264846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175376520860096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819463358881733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335427634296912,0.0,0.0,0.13030686217603105,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,draconawarrior,2020/03/17,"Giving back to the community! Hi! The start of the COVID-19 scare made me extremely anxious and due to all that therapy, I was able to manage it (somehow!) I know a lot of people are dealing with tough feelings due to this and wanted to provide something to the community. 

So, I'm creating a newsletter that I'll send out every week dealing with one specific topic- overwhelming feelings, depression due to the virus, etc. (I'll take topics from folks.)

Here's how the newsletter will look:
- A few lines on what I'll talk about 
- 3 tips for management
- journalling prompts
- Link to a meditation that helps me manage the issue for me (not regular)

If you're interested, just submit on this form: https://forms.gle/3dB8CnNE7W3X7JvK8

Do note: I don't intend to make any profit. I have had anxiety and depression for 7 years and through this expertise, I want to highlight the importance of mental health management. I have a page on [Instagram](https://instagram.com/notesonakinderself?igshid=1u6dvbf4il8hm), also NO profit.",6.894903100775196,9.82168364534884,6.444790697674417,69.28005426356592,67.19767441860465,9.70294573643411,31.815503875969,10.047579312681364,3.780017364341086,825,35,125,22,15,256,113,172,0.107,0.762,0.13,0.4639,0,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,2,13,0,8,1,0,4,1,23,20,8,0,3,3,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,4,0,2,1,3,5,0,1,3,3,9,3,25,16,6,12,0,3,1,0,7,4,0,3,7,83,17,6,0.18128027123628146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449697674128962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232768008060514,0.0,0.13867891130983315,0.20479510711926624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393933388173548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3737839993092159,0.3122728639664513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021754217040286,0.0,0.0,0.15273644707055467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18332150399953104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17390055460713866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19269245127651494,0.0,0.0,0.12150834458556245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18920950507760068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962689618279834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15222977123550055,0.0,0.0,0.15411800396124026,0.0,0.17153177581735668,0.12100598871459363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18268787583133836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284020335999912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567691476041984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18149317610652727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395584093504281,0.0,0.0,0.1283111090254755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13630020336156592,0.1457062152450936,0.0,0.0,0.20730978889098287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138476015700631,0.0,0.1454120989283481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167385511690076
mentalhealth,mattisca,2020/03/17,"Resilience Hi all,

I wanted to ask a question about resilience. I'm an 18 year old who has just finished high school and decided to take a year off to work and eventually travel. With the recent pandemic, the travel is sort of off the table at the moment, so my year is looking like it will consist of purely working and no study. At the beginning of the year, my mental health took a big drop. I've always suffered with chronic, moderate anxiety, but leaving high school not having a job with the whole year ahead of me really made me worry and become anxious again. This stemmed a lot from feeling aimless and lonely, which I filled with attempts to validate myself which always were unhealthy (e.g. continuously dating people even though I knew I wasn't ready, obsessing over boys and how people looked at me etc.). My genuine connections became less important when compared to self-validation, coupled with drinking which obviously didn't help. 

​

Now I have a job I'm in a better place, yet I have been thinking whether I should start university 6 months earlier (in June) than originally planned since my travel plans have been corrupted by COVID-19. Thankfully, I've learnt a lot about myself in the past 4 or so months in terms of learning to live without study and how to effectively deal with various types of adversity. My question is (finally lol), is this something that would build resilience for me, and more broadly, how important do you think resilience is in becoming the best person you can be in terms of your mental health? Should I go back to study early or continue on a more independent path of working full-time, even if I know it's going to be more difficult?

​

Sorry for such a long story but it's something that I would love to get input on, please let me know any questions or further details if my story is not specific enough or confusing. Love you all ! <3",8.310773729194782,8.194221663817666,7.919580146948572,71.18677462887989,61.70655270655271,10.808277103013943,37.562003298845404,10.307518312809881,3.9491276353276334,1528,67,257,30,19,485,207,351,0.102,0.777,0.12,0.8948,2,2,3,0,0,0,51.0,0,4,0,10,17,12,0,2,20,1,26,6,0,7,4,58,49,24,0,7,13,0,1,1,0,5,3,0,0,2,11,14,1,0,12,4,0,7,6,6,0,0,8,3,27,6,47,33,15,58,0,2,2,2,16,20,0,13,31,179,38,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550279031701105,0.18946758964652166,0.2124817244629213,0.059457548575140226,0.0,0.0668861298446935,0.0987745865392144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173820414151324,0.0,0.0,0.06723070488196034,0.0,0.0,0.1931261169721345,0.0,0.0,0.09175570963679118,0.07732752687410721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967431310800335,0.0,0.0,0.09013975115440756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08565121290183128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903418290137959,0.0975110878775876,0.11549755819520267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04420883393165095,0.0,0.0,0.09577875560084473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04568021863124911,0.0,0.09938056206663164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18587472593259946,0.0,0.0,0.05860460567797536,0.18475587276811206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17352784484970685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610195885109972,0.0,0.0,0.09257909452406896,0.0,0.08940633223011094,0.0,0.042715426680344,0.0,0.07720508416101622,0.07737559727466345,0.14684367145538307,0.0,0.0,0.1486650958966041,0.15782368518930107,0.08273137221403225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762241261990599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957663197425962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917463959932544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346484668423236,0.12123029175453125,0.07634326486639895,0.0913490454039,0.09597535651993766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938354553868676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05601192262369068,0.0,0.08632969975632107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697405616346218,0.0,0.0,0.09121185674344473,0.0,0.0,0.07232561536423464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462063987330636,0.0,0.09787426693683447,0.06188564229221812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573885685857274,0.0,0.0,0.08049670883035694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120472800114343,0.08590263803770087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714146039896436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051570344439880685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761600329012804,0.0,0.08428244839788343,0.0,0.1909571504358183,0.08879262042272068,0.0,0.12422001983640965,0.0,0.2124817244629213,0.2815204495630472
mentalhealth,PyotyrAirsoft,2020/03/17,"I feel like my shell has gotten too thick to crack Ive been masking my emotions and true feelings since middle school. Im 19 now. I grew up as an insecure kid obsessed with being popular and cool and afraid of rejection and being bullied. I guess having shitty parents and a narcissist brother didnt help. But idk ive been lying to everybody about my deepest passions and putting on a front and hiding my genuine feelings for so long that I feel like the person I was supposed to be has faded away so much that im just a shell. 

I dont know who I am anymore, I dont like anything or have any strong emotions about anything. I dont get excited about the girls I like or show any interest to them or just friends in general, not just because im afraid but because I have no clue how. Ive tried before and I have no idea what to say or what to do and it doesnt come off the way I want or something. It kind of feels like trying to stick two magnets together that attract away from each other, its just impossible and the more I try the more resistance there is. Idk what im typing about anymore, im just salty that I cant get close to anybody or have people know who I really am even though I dont either. 

Does anybody know what im talking about? Is there a way to recover from this? I genuinely feel like all my true interests and passions were buried under my facade and now I cant recover my true self...",4.210059685295715,4.715883769759454,5.305494664496294,84.30390667390127,70.40893470790378,8.325628504250316,30.09242177608971,8.371475516178862,2.0704735395189005,1111,43,231,16,19,368,149,291,0.084,0.752,0.16399999999999998,0.9689,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,1,20,25,0,4,10,1,30,2,0,1,4,49,45,25,0,1,15,2,7,6,1,0,0,1,0,4,15,16,0,0,10,1,0,4,11,5,0,1,6,9,30,20,28,36,6,20,0,1,0,2,13,10,0,7,10,155,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559438378936425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16857762765937878,0.0,0.0,0.13988166445907382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15970478263850665,0.0,0.0,0.1036201620043464,0.0,0.07232157841977482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732127243130264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437670827858271,0.0,0.3984380158476895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19120818584743135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05613613993805328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578457927802387,0.24287201958164334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566428729608911,0.0,0.08880918992765963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362781228019816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05696806749443304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594515360472244,0.550832974849302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850565632135345,0.14012745623423367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24913557035608855,0.0,0.0,0.07521487768702241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624785938094876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437309642817557,0.0,0.0,0.058922463201876274,0.07421137324175994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085440017180358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05444778531661658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758871924724905,0.0,0.08601602092233376,0.0,0.0,0.08866475853118701,0.0,0.0,0.07030591691523973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06543067400356603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831301613689462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350380017181372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17311112049154734,0.0,0.08302442822308836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050130238549943563,0.134924727368043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FreyedChicen,2020/03/17,"Scary Thoughts I often have thoughts of myself falling down the stairs and cracking my skull open or stumbling into oncoming traffic, things like that. It seems to happen several times a day and I just space out of just think of my death and how the scene would look. It gets really scary sometimes, especially I’m alone and I’m suddenly realize that I could just make a little mistake and it would lead to my death and nobody would notice for hours. I don’t know how to deal with this.",4.8257750759878455,6.391014404255322,4.710972644376903,85.20500000000001,69.85106382978725,7.924620060790273,27.258358662613983,8.418075326091056,1.7900443768996954,390,13,75,6,7,120,64,94,0.205,0.77,0.025,-0.9515,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,4,0,6,1,1,4,0,30,17,9,2,5,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,10,0,0,6,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,1,8,1,11,11,0,13,0,0,1,0,1,7,0,3,5,49,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226255245938394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744198895862245,0.0,0.0,0.14088649145123902,0.22521925318618802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413460314404986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931805279564088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151358331788218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005808272700187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672690320607836,0.2189509922591075,0.0,0.0,0.1834485984083073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582153575178536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487143874953841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994894839703947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19887476432465126,0.0,0.24679387649994197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21605925060367584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513291665539554,0.1399782249370288,0.0,0.3468604172454588,0.1273838517015338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4655560905155937,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MillieMonster20,2020/03/17,"Bullying and Health I have no idea how to start this, but I'm hoping to fine support as well as to vent.
I have moved to a different state go to university and am staying with a sibling. They bully me and make me feel horrible every day and I'm trying to move out desperately but I have health problems and I need to get tests (some of these they won't let me go home alone after) and it might be either fibromyalgia, MS or Friedreich's ataxia and it's making me really distressed knowing I may be severely impaired in the near future and even knowing this they still treat me so poorly. 
They keep putting me down and yelling at me about things that are incredibly hypocritical and although I've never hurt myself (other than hitting myself or my leg out of frustration) I'm starting to really consider it and I keep giving my myself small blisters on my fingers where I keep rubbing out of anxiety.
I am so scared about the future and I'm already missing time at uni and Im struggling to pay for bus trips to appointments and uni supplies because they are trying to raise my rent to an unfair amount. I am scared that I'm going to injure myself and I could really use some help.

TLDR : I'm in bad accommodation and am facing possible long term health problems and it is making consider harming myself.",3.99537495313086,5.943729129921263,5.247615298087741,78.98274278215223,72.66141732283464,7.830221222347207,27.843269591301087,8.563005593585519,2.2298434945631804,1045,40,187,19,21,347,145,254,0.237,0.675,0.08800000000000001,-0.9931,2,1,0,0,1,2,14.0,0,0,5,0,9,16,1,4,5,0,17,7,3,5,1,48,45,27,0,5,5,0,3,0,0,3,4,1,2,0,11,21,0,3,4,0,3,7,3,11,1,0,0,4,31,5,34,37,5,32,0,2,0,0,7,12,0,7,11,132,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040046254059995,0.128285321611425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893131715730228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706431482282472,0.07086522807203567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281656783409946,0.0,0.0,0.07497195773781164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145703373321347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678236132514428,0.0,0.0979460632306528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05877974761970881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607360901332344,0.11151807603281663,0.19820352078091785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3707065480202113,0.0,0.0,0.0779202621908038,0.0,0.11660873372196318,0.1154629805421272,0.0,0.0,0.1244485685867372,0.13123266864454347,0.1255704927086048,0.0,0.0,0.30998636729389445,0.0,0.0,0.12777647326687433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887401627047403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287803760579983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327943418073421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332341353648145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471117759138517,0.0,0.08619827550662336,0.08965955508824118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310549759897529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22247206418097232,0.0,0.11686386484728227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22341914834976367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327740685843017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132997981788866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456540974792974,0.1239075693481754,0.09283780244095008,0.0,0.0,0.12153026718283495,0.0,0.0,0.13191969399529338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723166913855292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778660358329955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785292229034967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004031103219696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045231639721952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,That_dude6969,2020/03/17,"Spiraling, booze I'm spiraling and it hurts.",1.7650000000000006,3.2617055000000046,3.6700000000000017,75.87500000000001,119.0,11.6,29.0,8.841846274778883,5.4213000000000005,36,2,6,2,2,12,7,8,0.341,0.659,0.0,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,3dsg3rd1jkstr4,2020/03/17,"Don’t know how I’m gonna cope mentally during this time I’ve been struggling with depression and my general mental health for years now and I only just started trying to do something about it, just started trying to see a doctor, therapist etc. 

Now there’s a global pandemic and obviously life is going to change for the worse. I’ve already been trying to deal with being lonely as it is. I live on my own and honestly, social interaction, going out with friends, family, talking and having fun together, that’s pretty much all I had in life to look forward to. I always told myself that whenever work is going badly or no matter how much I’m trying to deal with, I told myself that everything would be okay as long as I kept my mind on that next trip to the pub with my friends or the next time I’d see my friends for dinner and all that. Now I don’t even have that, now I have nothing. Nothing but myself and the darkness that lives in my mind. I had so many dreams for the future that I’m just seeing get crushed in front of me, I wanted to travel, I wanted to have new experiences, I wanted to one day have a family and now I can’t have any of that. I’ve lost the one thing in this world I had to look forward to, the one thing I had to keep me sane. Now I have nothing, I have nothing to motivate me to carry on or even want to live anymore. I’m struggling to find a reason to even want to get out of bed in the morning. 

I’m sorry I understand this probably sounds like first world complaining considering the crisis we have on our hands but I’m not coping. I can’t live like this, the complete social isolation for this long at a time is honestly more scary to me than any virus or disease. I just called my doctor’s surgery and they’re not even seeing patients right now. 

I don’t know how much more of this I can handle, is there a way I can give myself any kind of motivation to live right now? Is there any way I can even stay sane? Is there any hope that things will be normal one day and that I can finally live my life? Is there any way to convince myself that life is worth living whilst everything is crumbling around me? 

Sorry to waste your time if I have, I hope you’re all doing okay and that this chaos isn’t impacting you all too badly. 

Any insight or anything like that will be hugely appreciated. Have a good day!",4.1470681106471785,4.809076751565762,5.225683063674321,84.25800267484342,70.62839248434237,8.158689979123173,25.824699895615865,8.278499904357787,1.4714701983298537,1840,52,383,26,32,608,193,479,0.12,0.754,0.126,-0.5134,0,3,1,0,0,1,38.0,2,2,0,5,29,24,0,2,17,2,46,9,1,6,5,65,82,26,0,10,14,0,1,3,3,4,7,1,1,0,26,20,1,2,8,3,1,8,9,8,0,5,10,8,49,16,57,64,11,58,0,3,6,0,18,21,0,8,32,260,75,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06838902214569542,0.0,0.0515667083535325,0.0,0.0,0.29500754481438346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146081102873295,0.0,0.0,0.050998704069290884,0.055169331356611256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349014980968367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328161700473896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555948086058316,0.0,0.06497777325734194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199028574812579,0.12778339848224604,0.053377469186966106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12686449427162144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911655534390622,0.20466373483357364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113951216082634,0.06062172997567902,0.11684572874545344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788866585681687,0.056642427518240786,0.05271441456603846,0.0,0.0,0.14364113704325815,0.0,0.0647569302705758,0.05945038821007581,0.10566247799649901,0.051980221577289515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587466646911816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310684081568828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055084671863809435,0.0,0.06453560289900134,0.06811775462835869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17509415621990732,0.0908309982931432,0.0,0.3830646044336267,0.10968875166310743,0.10408384283220716,0.0,0.0676511228933359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283114814570825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490891893913887,0.0,0.1251506312906556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667240786748291,0.0,0.0,0.05985415077438942,0.13181850832996592,0.0,0.06072062657405576,0.2378600181963245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797871160456482,0.04713344904549897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630490747665417,0.0668176450219037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371882235834841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584963331621018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19753862534227493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634784726011838,0.0,0.04771003538549404,0.0,0.13874795850859967,0.08772997027482443,0.0660552384148755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957579291751145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04981175063248529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195571953081911,0.12351682011751974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454840118596649,0.0,0.0,0.11843619185524475,0.0,0.16830307415803414,0.0,0.0,0.06451633857878186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827671418279074,0.14757444306832218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045117263905347184,0.0,0.06315603600340634,0.04402401851275881,0.0,0.0,0.039908740956910126
mentalhealth,Travelling_Sofa,2020/03/17,"I’m(20F) tired of struggling with BPD and I need advice on how to deal with this I deal with constant anxiety relating to any conflict or issues in my life I have this extreme distrust to everyone in my life and often blow things out of proportion in my head to the point where I have no stable relationships in my life I have suicidal thoughts very very often though I know they’re just thoughts and feelings and thoughts and feelings go away I’m constantly bored with my life and feel low just going about my typical day I don’t even trust myself to keep myself okay and my therapist and psychiatrist are so hesitant and to diagnose me with this or take me seriously they think my thoughts are unreasonable and just typical young 20F stress related thoughts but I’ve literally lost so much sleep obsessing about things I shouldn’t asking staying up until 2am almost every day of the week googling resolutions because I don’t trust my own judgement I go into a rage every here and there with my boyfriend and although he loves me a lot I know he’s still hesitant to take me 100% serious because of how often we break up and how impossible it is for me to ever stay level headed for too long I want to go back on anti depressants because back then my moods were a lot more stable and I didn’t deal with anxiety at all but I doubt my doc will prescribe them again because last time I tried to kill myself after a few months of using Prozac and being in the military that’s taken very seriously and could easily be a way to give someone the boot ... I guess I just needed to rant but I’m so tired of living in this head and in this body I’m not close with my family I have one good friend I’ve been on and off with for years and my bf who’s mom shows Jocasta signs but that’s a whole different conversation. Anyone with BPD out there and normal happy healthy lives? What do you do? Is there any way out? Would you recommend trying to go back on anti depressants or mood stabilizers although it will look horrible on my behalf depending on those as a servicemember? I’m already being considered for a medboard/medical separation or LIMDU/limited duty status and that would just be asking for an involuntary discharge. Should I just let it all play out? I’m not going to lie I hate living in this head and the whole work out stay social don’t impulsively spend go to church stuff gets exhausting after a while. I wonder if I’m better off giving up. 

TDLR; BPD has become too much for me to live with. I’m not sure how to cope and due to my job as a service mention the military it’s hard to get the help I need without risking discharge as I am already being considered for medical separation. What can I do to cope? Should I get anti depressants from somewhere other than the military facilities?",4.899765113232267,6.19233728832117,5.867372262773722,78.02331368145238,69.36496350364963,9.343140557739098,29.56223095639153,9.661875296680813,2.774794067003556,2246,85,421,51,39,742,260,548,0.161,0.741,0.098,-0.9839,2,0,0,0,0,1,22.0,1,2,2,3,33,31,4,5,19,1,34,17,6,6,4,106,81,48,2,12,19,1,4,0,2,7,10,0,0,0,21,42,0,3,12,2,1,7,10,19,0,1,10,5,55,10,82,57,11,68,1,5,1,1,24,32,0,15,23,294,76,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289311907906574,0.0,0.0,0.06444854662802305,0.0,0.14204859362371794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753578432513873,0.0,0.09847243918960218,0.0,0.0,0.04500291858590416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033825780444712,0.0,0.060469561541205925,0.14846960453987532,0.0,0.15693620841435665,0.07108200105769501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05692234104046436,0.0,0.07149089691221176,0.2431824190480753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391034046167292,0.0,0.05138726223780244,0.0,0.0,0.08301543016846995,0.19906102770623565,0.16630288439529434,0.06532536637625275,0.0,0.06724386161563367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042510032731498185,0.058218482093149865,0.10845434503439627,0.061499981866041636,0.0,0.0,0.06067410718298594,0.0,0.09762902385934126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0497253819968308,0.0,0.10087837108631016,0.12348245040899256,0.25604607652665273,0.05398320621965466,0.0,0.0,0.07090122992072292,0.0,0.0,0.06851380239604278,0.0576550844271037,0.06354346061429927,0.26421305490037233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04314002381551224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717647732762247,0.06386866077220475,0.05720728212642402,0.07120624435147377,0.0,0.07074257638272788,0.05246305103024637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658137915449555,0.18184116297044392,0.0,0.0,0.2273288340296145,0.056957726624938934,0.0540472835748746,0.0,0.07025796365088498,0.10943535415553844,0.05808858756878485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149089691221176,0.06483724025631142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537917861489976,0.051372576931453286,0.0,0.09462592443264466,0.14316926895495052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306041041514197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04361288367912134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084223346692716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06909995142339816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440778260863944,0.0656082418185804,0.05453312202460405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20580175203389084,0.051399018633629306,0.0,0.07372565358171378,0.06728440681750973,0.07367829207852178,0.07040081773910302,0.0,0.06065976511693332,0.0,0.09678337795041893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472843185826204,0.08551757790009472,0.041240123299500685,0.0632346520873267,0.2554784214000801,0.03752959256984326,0.14794769662497528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739419806210022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05558749994750999,0.0,0.15931444295699926,0.0379619632548218,0.10217401094968984,0.0516267539668047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14371418962704058,0.0,0.06204199804864185,0.06979708616611241,0.0468557941379199,0.0,0.0,0.09144084414717027,0.0,0.0,0.04144656809206311
mentalhealth,Jimmy-_-James,2020/03/17,"There are days that I look back on and think that wasn't me. I am 36, of sound mind, married, work an important job and am in charge of people yadda yadda etc. But in the last few years I have been having days that I look back on and feel like it wasn't me going through that day. It wasn't me making those decisions because I would have done things differently, I wouldn't have said that or spent that much money or thought those thoughts. This only happened a fews times so no big deal, but all of the sudden recently it has gotten very frequent. An example is yesterday; I remember being there and watching it take place but I don't feel like I was the one at the wheel. It's really weird. Nothing bad has happened and I haven't spent all my money or anything like that, just little things. I don't have anyone I can talk to about it, I don't dare talk to my wife about it for fear that she would use it against me in a fight. I do have a doctors appointment coming up and will speak with them about getting someone to talk to. 

Has anyone ever gone through something like this? It maybe a normal life thing or just a stress thing, who knows.

​

I've tried googling this but I don't have the right words and haven't found anything.",5.286666666666669,5.304135603174603,5.15009523809524,88.06157142857144,67.96825396825398,8.14857142857143,27.91111111111111,7.554174236665415,1.3281663492063491,980,28,211,9,15,303,135,252,0.065,0.8640000000000001,0.071,0.0639,2,0,1,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,1,1,11,9,1,2,12,0,33,2,0,2,3,39,55,16,0,4,10,1,2,4,0,4,2,3,0,0,27,9,0,0,9,0,4,3,11,5,0,1,14,8,23,4,22,36,6,27,0,0,3,0,11,11,0,4,17,148,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122394341459566,0.1372612634506571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579713933707242,0.0,0.1859162956806108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737216980538292,0.09431859908590118,0.06886062141228402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730680967801934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21855354475427588,0.1164589205199234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180213067156163,0.0,0.115621451852619,0.0,0.11559940380043147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259825536182653,0.0,0.10218064766875012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271137193373209,0.11423402020059567,0.16140023204506151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385706482466408,0.0,0.0,0.05901801239495921,0.0,0.06419894014971023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997839477131519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209741114510197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062080992260992736,0.09207915322100124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978844147563642,0.22075022027604324,0.11321765721415475,0.0,0.0,0.18971935515533095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754030501476319,0.0,0.113485569291672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140594756095934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830401094047032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067883164948694,0.10839014020214058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654601323861776,0.08591273454011741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831366700726539,0.0,0.1180213067156163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236638621096897,0.0,0.11153640334782136,0.0,0.12796398983437654,0.09646897938113816,0.1074527841656852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957123842383494,0.08696371023085535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939765452366225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849334084897659,0.2723838672363764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001878847652964,0.07238152485562513,0.0,0.17935851039387807,0.06586908379705265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766938216131124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756294810014472,0.0,0.09320552728877454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822377227971325,0.0,0.0,0.16049000836857058,0.0,0.1372612634506571,0.07274386103914357
mentalhealth,throwaway_entity,2020/03/17,"binged on my latest food shopping So I ate too much already of what was supposed to be a 2-week supply of groceries.  I feel too sick to sleep.  Why do I do this, I'm going to be low on food in a week now.  I wonder if I'll be able to get refills of my medications in time.  The meds aren't helping much but I'm scared of withdrawals if I have to go off them.  Fuck this virus and fuck my life.",-0.3552873563218384,1.4137911724137917,1.8788505747126472,98.80954022988509,85.55172413793103,4.326436781609195,18.86206896551724,5.033348758259628,-0.6626413793103452,300,8,75,1,9,101,58,87,0.209,0.7909999999999999,0.0,-0.9552,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,4,4,2,1,3,0,8,9,1,0,0,6,18,5,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,2,1,1,2,1,4,0,0,2,1,9,0,14,13,2,12,0,1,0,2,2,6,2,3,4,47,12,0,0.19775073260909176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822285081760728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998871215185036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4782419416409425,0.0,0.0,0.3656347315685052,0.10331659592775397,0.0,0.2247725970183363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254814766133194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13967719062574965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21965648421718173,0.1992130586714369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29073908391720016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19798298123592825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978935458231977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153100424536274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172474191174033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843927802085066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21445223403307315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,haircombsnightmare,2020/03/17,"Lately I've had a bad phobia when it comes to talking to men irl I 25F have depression, anxiety and OCD (diagnosed). Usually it's the depression side that hits the worst, but I've been very anxious lately. Can't sleep properly, not even with strong meds. During the day my muscles feel tense.

Today I had to go buy some vegetables at the grocery store, you might as well just have put me through hell. The clerk was a guy around my age and I just felt terrified. My muscles tense, I can't look at him anywhere, I feel an urgency to gtfo. This isn't only there but almost any man close to my age. 

Of course I haven't had the prettiest story with my dad, but this is a new thing for me. It did happen sometimes with someone I felt attracted to, but now it happens anywhere and it's become a real issue.

I have had a terrible year:

- Uncle died on Dec 31st
- Stepdad diagnosed with cancer on January
- Grandma (who I used to live with) has a stroke, loses her memory and now needs a permanent caregiver
- I have to move out of my house back to my mom's, no job prospects.
- I'm moving to Spain in june by myself.

Yeah it hasn't been peachy to say the least, but it worries me and makes me embarassed because it's very obvious I'm tense. Whenever I have to interact with a guy I feel sick to my stomach for a few hours afterwards.

Any advice?",2.866030303030304,4.4584727814814835,4.361548821548823,85.65151515151516,74.8888888888889,8.020202020202017,26.346801346801357,8.710501217029153,1.9156296296296305,1041,38,214,21,22,347,157,270,0.248,0.7120000000000001,0.04,-0.9962,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,0,2,10,10,1,0,17,1,21,8,2,2,1,36,37,12,1,1,8,2,6,0,0,1,5,1,0,4,13,15,1,0,5,0,2,5,7,7,1,0,10,8,28,3,33,25,4,30,1,3,1,0,13,9,1,3,16,137,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681477434352823,0.0,0.0,0.11970375362774427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16258492252657936,0.0,0.09144908005380688,0.1350481047816661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641746517145938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09192019521984693,0.09981233361133857,0.07287151615586683,0.13202442548607687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297459720952656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770945127555979,0.0,0.20592219729572306,0.2426646362555828,0.12406542056222035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895617125656036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813316394305514,0.0,0.22955757423745454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793830796703472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23673017212193756,0.2114206766490886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772450335262427,0.13793508201110838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12477048610602835,0.11862670042408205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696965088579132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055575190012554,0.0,0.10038492806729217,0.13373659459426965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979501889964928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13278388975935188,0.0,0.0,0.12681486204750744,0.0,0.14000580459414586,0.0,0.2541078362508953,0.0,0.08863866238888868,0.0,0.11545412729816545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091685631983044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017243501423673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606463565757596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506436491333924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962804042103173,0.0,0.1012873019629358,0.0,0.11822980670503115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608309739695063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941819956684087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331156232434934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324565481521232,0.13165830354925168,0.19726885840819305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074823526189682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140040800804207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698094115671818
mentalhealth,Jaemza,2020/03/17,"Is my Nausea telling me I'm Depression and what do I do about it? So lately I have not been able to eat much. I want to but I don't know why I can't. Whenever I do, I feel like I'm going to puke everywhere. The only time when I don't feel this way is when I am a little buzzed. I have been dating this girl and I wonder if it is tied to it. I'm pretty confident in myself but in the past I have went through the same thing with an ex. It was terrible, I would have to force myself to eat peanut butter crackers and chase it with water. At the time it was all I ate for a few months. And the whole time I felt happy in the relationship. In this relationship I'm happy, but what is the matter with me. Is it tied to some subconscious doubt or fear or something that I'm just not realizing. Even today, my girlfriend now made me food for lunch and I had to force myself to eat it. I hadn't eaten at all by that point so I know I was hungry. One thing to note is that I do lose appetite and do get nauseous when I am sad so thats why I have come here. Any help, advice, and assessments of what the hell is going on with me will be very appreciated.",1.4557200000000032,2.599847332000003,3.5866000000000007,91.6123,77.68,6.76,19.7,7.365786028017652,0.2141999999999995,883,18,213,11,20,303,123,250,0.124,0.753,0.124,-0.2641,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,11,10,1,2,11,0,32,8,0,1,2,37,52,19,0,3,9,1,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,20,12,8,0,7,0,0,4,6,7,0,1,12,4,31,3,27,37,7,26,1,3,0,0,7,9,1,6,13,154,51,0,0.13267395037913138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964744879988915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902228358414256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428686049720513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11427187905250195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4072757199776229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876298929475894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492950797303437,0.1341678714357181,0.0947822966603602,0.1273877984177521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16042986743294793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931666315773427,0.0,0.15080332694569332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824677744813361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892855229228525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582826680963207,0.0,0.14966199489817494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481779053515307,0.13297415297726434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14842821379205706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553929977064995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058990814093028,0.0,0.09753061918904686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990330240572318,0.10090451778050392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665229800728445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541976711884706,0.0,0.0,0.13497710468171994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28488434173466715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213888886461164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596288047243808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762853546562849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23208974220515316,0.0,0.12575939180158524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946990380290764,0.0782545333971357,0.10531040634688778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299008120488478,0.23943520820855785,0.14812572753838113,0.0,0.0,0.14387923969435498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424776774773534,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,steverksjdskjfb,2020/03/17,"i’m feeling stuck in my life. help! i’m happy in my relationship but outside of it, i feel stuck and it’s starting to effect my relationship. i feel like i can’t do anything because i don’t know what to do. it feels like i’m waiting on something that’s never going to happen and idk what to do. please help me get out of this loop. thank you.",0.2528378378378377,2.295166648648649,2.6877702702702737,92.26787162162165,85.21621621621622,4.781081081081081,21.41216216216216,5.985473137389443,0.12065405405405415,268,9,60,2,8,92,45,74,0.07,0.653,0.276,0.9468,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,12,21,3,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,4,9,4,10,19,0,7,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,4,35,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770774506716512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117369025360429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4352123949768433,0.3074538627582293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11242434817613677,0.0,0.12229357965546203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902858058603891,0.2290665330684263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28846554551990505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825906711941417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199026807033594,0.21025529848572533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16596256058705822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362065511294441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4620524844397982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656585513631665,0.0,0.0,0.15230778671021294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981117930636684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,daelon_rax,2020/03/17,"I am breaking down. Mobile and it's late so there is gonna be errors all over this, sorry in advance if you read it and cringe at all the typos.

No throwaway, dont care. No one IRL really knows (cares?) who I am on here anyway.

I'm scared. I am so very fuxking scared. The doctors tell me that despite my previous issues my heart is strong, and that since I'm under 40, I will probably okay if I get corona. But still, I have heart disease. No matter how much I watch what I eat and exercise, I'm still pre diabetic.

I have flatlined before, I was fortunate enough to come back. I know what those few moments did to my wife and children's psyche. I am so afraid. We have a family business. We are going to have to shut it down, at least temporarily until things I'm the world improve. Dont care to shutter to help the greater good. Afraid it will be hard to recover and open back up later. We didnt panic buy and hoard, and we have enough to survive on. Tonight my oldest child and I cleaned and serviced the few guns we own. There are a LOT of whacked out addicts here. Not addicts that need help, addicts that are proud meatheads. They arent preparing to take care of themselves, some are vocal that they are already preparing to ""do what they gotta"". I have not aimed at another human since my time in the Military, could I even be able to do it again? I'm afraid, because most of all, I know that I am starting to succumb to my fears, fears for the health of my self, my family, my community.

I'm getting caught up by my own fear, and its shutting me down.

Thanks for reading, be well everyone, stay healthy and look out for eachother.",2.200956696878148,4.131014498489428,3.4006132930513613,90.33344763343405,77.7311178247734,6.346868076535751,24.930614300100714,7.3011,1.0501056596173215,1273,46,269,16,30,412,178,331,0.1,0.792,0.10800000000000001,0.5428,1,0,0,1,0,0,50.0,5,1,3,4,16,19,0,9,9,1,33,10,2,1,3,39,58,20,0,4,5,1,1,0,0,4,7,0,1,4,19,21,1,0,3,3,1,4,9,9,1,1,4,3,38,10,38,45,15,39,0,0,2,0,18,20,0,5,13,189,57,5,0.09629513577589822,0.0,0.0,0.3149277350748415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626407685894433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097384598858844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14809003093533,0.0,0.05870062098985114,0.0,0.08194006807341077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3927172346316196,0.0,0.0,0.08294973291690387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688383031054245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856215184090933,0.0,0.0,0.2257143639212075,0.0,0.0,0.09853396400574478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19899723313769935,0.0,0.06360202899892572,0.0,0.0,0.09201412887125608,0.0,0.0,0.1815569679238022,0.32507639816764583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062046801549268,0.0,0.054726744783717744,0.08076779119705135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08626152736295305,0.0,0.0,0.10235722636622464,0.0,0.2282203990748825,0.12908919939247746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050710348833324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15876386486121646,0.0,0.10862510747609727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086366150208298,0.0,0.0,0.08186668089002623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707880046556143,0.07140162302659356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06525207613945044,0.0,0.0,0.11298159388695825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382244318415283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926423892144306,0.0,0.06168912975591428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19281645946786544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045682780302093,0.0,0.0,0.1593126628005983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779452070223433,0.06815819273052458,0.10263780226160224,0.15380283964026026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240195802596351,0.0,0.0841661930480523,0.08865562336293788,0.0,0.0,0.06397420938104302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05615046805589498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945357185756635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658089164343026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loloser1776,2020/03/17,I need some advice I think I have a mental illness or many idk but I often feel many things at once and detached from reality and no one understands me. And on and offs of suicidal thoughts or just people I know plotting my downfall/judging me and because of this barely trust people around me and wonder would they notice if I left. At this point tho this is my last effort to find help because I also don’t want to make it a big deal and bring it up. I live in the USA if that helps,4.800726072607262,4.680180178217821,5.578960396039605,85.04619636963696,69.0,7.921452145214522,27.724422442244226,7.1686216300943375,1.3043848184818485,382,11,81,3,6,125,73,101,0.13,0.753,0.11699999999999999,-0.1128,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,1,5,1,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,1,0,27,14,14,1,5,6,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,8,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,14,1,12,12,1,12,0,0,0,0,4,10,0,7,1,59,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834626483098981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15013994189990154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16713322519775886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288957268538103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935572807382672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492972379923847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17159590956360954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516835906133444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103179971048379,0.15303757265284135,0.0,0.0,0.20398594457406025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657826425965751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532152351051545,0.3806887694393632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892032218346069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392108475653056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21374940127473324,0.0,0.19994274143190974,0.12722115324164954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26031806516659634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748010345772444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20536301354940148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472971247359906,0.12029968219005878,0.0,0.1490488894887453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19544959997653188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110737111082329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20360189572171167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336895734048962,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,godismalevolent,2020/03/17,"We're all just the result of the evil powers that be. They intend to leave all of us physically-and-mentally-tormented souls to die, sad and miserable and alone. How can we beat the system? It's the government/illuminati/whatever unnaturally enforcing natural selection, if that makes sense. The world is a super fucked up place full of 99% fucked up people and they think they're going to change that by not offering enough help and letting us die off. They aren't losing any sleep about my pain and suffering and likely inevitable premature death from mental and physical illness. All I needed was someone to care about me and help pick me up off my ass. And I could have been a productive member of society and hell, possibly have even gone on to use my brain to do great things. What they dont realize is they're not just killing off the most mentally ill among us, they're killing off the most intelligent also. And those aren't just delusions of grandeur. So many people are mentally ill *because* they're smarter and more aware of how shitty and fucked up the world is. I'm really stupid in a lot of ways considering my inability to pick myself up and take care of myself. Now I'm 99.99999% certain I have cancer that has spread like wildfire, and a whole plethora of other physical and mental illnesses. And it sucks and hurts so badly. But I'm just too afraid to go out and try to get help. Then there's studies that **DOCTORS ARE THE #3 LEADING CAUSE OF DEATH!** Think about that for a moment!! Think about how bad you have to be to be responsible for killing as many people as car accidents and heart attacks and shit! Plus if I step outside I'll catch a disease that will somehow fuck me up even worse than I already am and then I'll REALLY die even sooner and more painfully than I'm already about to. Its just so sad. I could've done great things. But the government doesnt want people who require resources. They want people who SUPPLY services and resources. I probably have my own FBI agent watching my every online move to try to catch me doing anything they can lock me up for. Imagine if they put forth this much effort to help make me better and turn me into a productive member of society. The things I could do and achieve..but nope. I'm mentally ill and full of unbridled rage and if I were to reproduce then it would likely just be another mentally ill loser like me and they cant risk that so it's easier to just let me die off. Fuck this world is so sad and fucked up. If theres a god hes one sick SOB lmao. Fml. 
How could we use our brains to come together and overcome the system that wants so badly for us to fail and die off? Cuz I know we're mostly depressed and anxious and unmotivated, but if overcoming our evil and malevolent overlords who are rooting for our demise isnt enough to motivate me then idk what is. What can we do? Create a website/forum with the goal of truly progressive deliberation for everyone? How can we ensure no man gets left behind like so many of us are everyday? Fuck its just so terrifying living in this shitty directionless space rock. I just want to be able to make life easier and more manageable and less cruel for myself and everyone.",3.7625547533822754,5.802498109324759,4.619135472911483,82.84851513680762,73.53376205787782,8.1670084329309,26.04453072862949,8.895488261720299,2.0574429654795847,2552,89,488,54,53,824,284,622,0.22699999999999998,0.685,0.08800000000000001,-0.9977,1,1,0,0,0,0,62.0,12,1,8,13,36,49,19,3,22,0,47,25,6,19,4,111,84,69,10,15,20,0,0,5,0,2,12,0,0,1,29,47,0,1,7,1,0,11,10,37,0,1,5,1,52,12,77,67,18,49,2,11,1,8,31,28,12,11,12,332,81,10,0.0568823775995187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05891298836559205,0.12554223630198452,0.04548881681529812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03868196734751482,0.05964613257896369,0.0,0.06426089576238732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04680935007172701,0.0,0.0,0.064711916326107,0.0,0.0,0.14248322795129548,0.034674969421525786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05030784048938962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699909106560764,0.0,0.0,0.1159907499488969,0.058433870766750225,0.060174013166181886,0.04899913159206032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18166379980809805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04899270847590107,0.0,0.2951746368953091,0.0,0.0,0.05822152378582495,0.0,0.058210421423985526,0.06666572290879323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175494033565839,0.0,0.11271082180200663,0.0,0.047925856444423584,0.10870709887415893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3681078905023362,0.05943738912438499,0.0,0.06465513208942532,0.0,0.0,0.12542604423180584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740589133339964,0.1525082347035918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060893761689601075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18879576896543712,0.0,0.031261067126006084,0.0,0.0,0.06023022471094331,0.06180286969746768,0.1163321699889998,0.04017770551029837,0.13894928227625242,0.0,0.05022818155384267,0.0,0.0,0.06363683058516884,0.0,0.04835936330203836,0.0,0.0,0.11390828623973882,0.17300940853114666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34394434645392485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06045696533144314,0.04181509250589747,0.042177562236053665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03854497118893691,0.0,0.12105372054340695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19717539234114867,0.0,0.059429977794572625,0.0,0.0,0.06412633400917156,0.0,0.0,0.0613288238177415,0.0,0.0,0.05718250050563101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288061529354835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058388943184175424,0.0,0.0,0.05692345737234075,0.0,0.048196253949779916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04276846885560088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337037240734553,0.10934379226809374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723880106548749,0.061871692642361274,0.0,0.0,0.34211248254897386,0.09825622170301633,0.0,0.0,0.13420280031912513,0.04515058368175832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350714320304833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0579680023713816,0.04040760901155525,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Saab_Pimping,2020/03/17,"Chaos and COVID-19/Feeling alone Life before the outbreak was fairly stable and controlled. I was still anxious all the time but broadly speaking things were going well, I am academically  stable and on track to graduate, I had a job lined up before I went back to my hometown.

Now that the outbreak has happened, it feels like the end of the world. I have plans that have been upended totally, my job opportunity is in jeopardy because of the impending shutdown of society. I've also been obsessing about how Ive seemingly not be successful enough and I'm afraid i will never have enough opportunity to advance my carrier. I don't know, it has ignited a total panic for the future and i just need people to talk to.

All input is appreciated, I just want to hear from other human beings.",6.9544217687074825,7.627090292517008,7.797687074829934,68.24850340136055,64.4421768707483,10.342857142857145,35.38095238095238,10.25414643259724,3.855797278911565,631,28,104,14,9,212,100,147,0.131,0.718,0.151,0.4995,2,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,6,9,8,0,3,9,0,19,1,0,3,5,22,29,8,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,2,0,1,6,5,0,1,3,0,0,4,3,3,1,0,7,3,13,5,15,19,6,16,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,8,83,19,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892212305124616,0.0,0.14610445219536375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20639804748206755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048437664652447,0.0,0.11137171214616506,0.0,0.31092705735725884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20491264309582807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161817227721789,0.3775541415605621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847563695208013,0.13052031636502348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383214289679546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615602637603008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20591523142109106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3626014505920654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040668030634683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904581972056553,0.08925758105488231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13546911212168655,0.14090885519045201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21435809945466727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12666059353173198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632245350736652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14590378512894586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468466642373215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137720371298726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653334938781596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776069810368984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16426848607168165,0.1693639516474709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prospective_Nobody,2020/03/17,"Advice on friend who has mental health issue Hello. Trying to find a way to explain this.  First information about me.  I'm a 21 year old male university student with depression and anxiety issues.  I have little to no friends and spend most of my time alone.  I often struggle with my loneliness.  This post isn't about me.  It's about my friend.  

I met her in highschool and for whatever reason decided to be vulnerable and get close to her.  Tell her about my problems I've told nobody about.  As you may have pieced together by now, I had a crush on her.  Overtime I learned she has mental health issues as well to a much higher magnitude. Eventually, due to the stress that it caused to keep my feelings to myself, I told her.  She understood, but stated she was in a relationship.  There must have been a miscommunication or new developement I didn't know about, because I thought she was single.  Anyways didn't take it to great.  I didn't lash out or anything, but felt the extreme need to distance myself.  I didn't expect us to get together, but knowing she was with someone made me weird.  Anyways graduation rolls around and I decide to make a run for it and just disappear.  However, I could never bring myself to get rid of her contact info.

Fast forward sophomore year.  We go to different universities in different states.  At this point I think about her from time to time and still haven't completely gotten past everything.  For whatever reason I contact her thanking her for the support in highschool and apologizing for acting weird towards the end.  She says it's ok.  However, things have gotten worse for her.  I don't think it's my place to go into specific detail, but know that it gets bad enough for hospitalization rather frequently.  Anyways I say I'm sorry and tell her that I'm here if she needs it.  She says thanks, but I don't hear from her after.  Figure if she needs me she'll contact me.

Fast forward 8 or so months and I get a message.  Wants to see how I'm doing.  We get to talking and it's getting worse.  Out impulse I tell her we should start talking regularly.  We start to and after a while I start to get the full scope of how bad it was.  I start to check up on her regularly.  Her issues often make it hard for her to communicate consistently, so I am the one who reaches out a good 99% of the time.  It's been this way getting close to a year now.  My old feelings start flaring up.  

Now onto the issue.  I find the whole situation difficult.  Trying to be there emotionally for her when I sometimes don't hear anything for weeks at a time.  How to be there for her.  Being the one that exclusively reaches out.  I often find myself repeating ""I'm sorry that happened"" on loop.  She tells me she appreciates me and that I'm not a nuisance (after asking).  She says she's probably just as open to me to her therapist, if not more so, but I feel a distance between us I can't shake.  I often wonder if I call or text to much.  I apologize for this, but she says she's ok with it and that it's on her for not responding.  Have I mentioned I haven't physically seen her in almost 3 years.  And yes I have brought up my feelings.  Of course she said that she's in no condition for a relationship, which was to be expected.  I mainly told her for my own sanity.  Still told her I want to be there for her (don't want a repeat of highschool).  So there it all is.  I'm probably not going to get alot of advice or am breaking some sub rule and the post will get deleted.  Either way that's all of it.",2.667742153679651,4.791006215007214,4.2300827471139995,84.02107650162337,77.03751803751804,7.217252886002886,25.258139430014428,8.17850203761792,1.6362128607503612,2749,100,544,50,64,916,276,693,0.079,0.851,0.07,-0.2248,4,1,0,0,0,0,80.0,6,1,0,1,38,21,0,3,28,3,44,2,0,9,4,114,114,44,0,17,24,0,6,0,3,5,2,8,0,1,34,33,0,1,25,0,2,11,19,10,1,3,26,16,105,11,101,76,16,89,0,1,2,0,89,33,0,19,41,399,139,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146376137477572,0.0,0.0,0.0587363745281861,0.06075081925624867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044872339032930066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965391994058416,0.05221704333591018,0.05483624806364573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979520596782528,0.035756678764463715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05989521453764985,0.0,0.0,0.060256755256828,0.0,0.0,0.06150060402432218,0.0,0.0,0.04683273151524077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050521069463043466,0.0,0.0,0.12256787304680705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598107497839756,0.051952569631060624,0.06060821862133298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0527170055300174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863468788149226,0.0,0.05631978633737645,0.0,0.1608339281793757,0.049893497023362175,0.0,0.0,0.13595443869573734,0.0,0.33710368480089914,0.0,0.10000813961037186,0.04919859305828392,0.0,0.06466939765359933,0.0,0.0,0.051870069527148066,0.0,0.05254502715026441,0.0,0.0,0.12469900320241473,0.13222109350300915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3061126230334413,0.0,0.05213691424433477,0.0,0.0,0.0967088323687194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587895856360879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055502541278251424,0.07830782199443395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822464171491348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04681934778978978,0.0,0.0862390857257124,0.13047996025108402,0.04523978821032086,0.05665116302784155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310101946750282,0.0,0.07949481575794738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055994612133228976,0.0,0.0,0.061283936523403526,0.0,0.05544969435340072,0.0,0.11235411946863208,0.0,0.12648403668913052,0.05612669534415336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061804725861786,0.0,0.1259510365721549,0.0,0.0,0.05579610823950912,0.2332314556817657,0.0,0.0,0.04674192484470634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593277074019373,0.0,0.0,0.04969976899425811,0.0,0.0580131365689457,0.13132310985212636,0.20758814485566773,0.0,0.09368689184787207,0.0,0.06719123747048071,0.061320888142754375,0.0,0.0,0.06656311211051406,0.0,0.0,0.04410266043863752,0.09429232790954753,0.2050747318783809,0.1080067158335489,0.0,0.06810513799270689,0.03896901285667809,0.07516989767632097,0.0,0.046566996552564965,0.1710164402771857,0.0,0.0,0.22419658207093274,0.0,0.07964831819394366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14111396599788065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037920112192691,0.1396772608890419,0.04705099673031644,0.0,0.05273956352472359,0.0,0.0,0.0654882918901871,0.0,0.0,0.06361086492284508,0.0,0.0,0.11955270755765562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109238446689002
mentalhealth,DarkRose19CE,2020/03/17,"Please read Hi i’m 17 years old and i’m a Type 1 Diabetic from Plymouth (Uk) with depression and anxiety. i don’t really know how to word this but i’ve been really really bad lately with my mental health and here goes: idk, i’ve been depressed before and i’ve gotten through it, but somehow this time feels different? i feel like my whole world is crumbling down around me and i feel like i’m failing at everything i try, everyday i wake up to emails of rejections from jobs, i’m not gonna get my disability money so i won’t have any money for anything and i keep having to ask my parents and i can’t support them which makes me feel like a disappointment to them and a failure as a son, my sleep patterns messed up yet again and it doesn’t seem to be getting any better so what’s the point of trying to change when 2/3 months down the line i’ll be in the exact same position? i really REALLY don’t see it getting better i’m on the verge of crying writing this. i really really don’t know what to do. i’m in such a dark place right now. and secondly this whole coronavirus has me so unbelievably worried you don’t understand cause i also have really bad anxiety and i can’t lie i can’t stop worrying about this whole coronavirus being diabetic it’s such a scary thing and i’ve taken myself off all social media to try and escape the constant talk of it. it’s like i literally worry about anything and when there was talks of WW3 i deleted everything for a few weeks because it could be the tiniest thing but if there’s a shred of possibility it could happen it sets my mind racing, and those few weeks of no social media or anything was the best i felt in ages and obvs the coronavirus propaganda isn’t helping my depression and anxiety but i’ve been really bad lately anyway so i was hoping that just a deep social media cleanse would help but even after deleting everything (it’s been like 4 days now) i still worry and even if i feel the tiniest bit different to normal for whatever reason i go into such immense worry. i rarely leave the house anyway because of my depression and anxiety my mum is the same. my sister and dad go out the house but are always washing their hands and limiting contact with the public as much as possible but i still worry? and because this virus doesn’t seem to be easing off anytime soon my anxiety just seems to be getting worse. i just feel like bursting into tears because like i said before i’ve been bad before but this time just is so much worse i’ve never fallen like this before. and it’s super hard for me because i’ve been suicidal before but never gone through with anything and i just feel sometimes like i don’t wanna be here but not in a sense of death (because death worries me so much) but in the sense of i just wanna stop hurting and it’s hard because growing up suicidal i don’t know how to cope or what to do with my life because in the harsh reality i wasn’t planning on being here for this part of my life you know? but going back to my main reason for my problems with this coronavirus i just can’t stop thinking about things again,it’s on my mind first thing in the morning last thing at night when i’m doing something that takes my mind off it, it always finds a way back in. i just wish i could turn off my anxiety and depression even if for a day. i don’t know what i can do because i just hate this feeling of constant fear? i know you may think i’m stupid for worrying this hard about things but that’s just who i am i wish i could change. sorry for the super long message but i needed to open up to someone before i burst into tears.",3.659346590909092,4.95635799048913,4.988148221343876,83.13451976284588,72.35597826086956,8.015770750988143,26.153557312252964,8.52124585384065,1.761380217391304,2875,94,573,49,55,958,280,736,0.235,0.66,0.105,-0.9989,4,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,3,3,9,50,34,2,1,29,0,53,9,3,6,4,128,107,60,4,16,31,5,13,9,0,4,6,1,0,0,42,38,0,5,24,1,2,6,21,18,0,2,15,15,71,16,85,76,15,82,0,9,1,0,27,37,0,11,46,391,113,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0358452261434362,0.07459325528932312,0.0,0.0,0.060962846005630775,0.0,0.20573849400206576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14754322986778964,0.039902295002149896,0.041903792464287035,0.0,0.0,0.06893279670602853,0.14970253892800986,0.24591514721745644,0.0,0.2288482763724657,0.0,0.04703935270435828,0.07928524175302926,0.0489355018086352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04604593961138315,0.09483434658931396,0.0,0.0,0.09687626037610388,0.0,0.14315122797406438,0.0,0.04923635806555158,0.057814720282322776,0.0,0.19303147868505494,0.0,0.0,0.09366174558444104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888162229567322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085304176014708,0.0,0.0,0.05043874352938706,0.1813123076648732,0.12808727416906368,0.0430374564571825,0.0,0.04096774053434108,0.03812672854929623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367342585276836,0.0,0.07642244819719438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03963715070460358,0.0,0.12045878358669501,0.0442537898524536,0.0,0.04764513743384332,0.0,0.0,0.06008830900002675,0.0,0.0,0.04451971193250323,0.0,0.1034402825642404,0.04798433574016795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04448027011192968,0.03984106337266585,0.0,0.0,0.14780248409186725,0.03653702226580684,0.10112540869263784,0.047461468039495615,0.0,0.0,0.06332013188158757,0.19708587362451932,0.0,0.0,0.03966726458027274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029919941982322888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04517140600900058,0.0,0.13577645278638842,0.0,0.03577757965533194,0.0,0.09885098483668547,0.03323595473298287,0.0691410796046191,0.0,0.0,0.04206368852143892,0.043917377548259987,0.0,0.0,0.04703457798499723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04977103866143679,0.048539332697676116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046830872792220514,0.049202590924735855,0.04237256498103626,0.10106321092683332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04288990360314055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044835491520968725,0.0,0.2584349393555012,0.0921717622603638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03827890596635507,0.042637281406809696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035718415960927015,0.12241651508464894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04485573257846523,0.13707531748947852,0.03797868889646167,0.03450721369467635,0.044331450834600016,0.05017608366113308,0.0,0.0,0.0715919890810329,0.11242301227208742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805896510981237,0.0508650196566824,0.0,0.0,0.033701589649215734,0.0720546404836124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17867189878371198,0.05744200055653531,0.0,0.0,0.05227372531423982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129636089949382,0.04875494615847556,0.0,0.046662700292463104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0355786981479914,0.07190919407676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501310477526828,0.10308930766954937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641623965324393,0.0913576698432226,0.031841230094330285,0.0,0.0,0.028864775332031963
mentalhealth,SpriteKid,2020/03/17,"Is this considered age-regression? I recently stumpled upod some youtube videos about age regression and was wondering if something ive experienced is the same thing.

I rememer that when I was in late elementary school (4th/5th grade) there were some nights where i would go cuddle with my mom and act like a baby: I would talk in a baby voice and say nonsense. I don't remember if I did anything else. At the time I had a feeling that it was weird but my mom didn't discourage it. I eventually stopped doing it because I felt ashamed by it.

Now I'm an adult (23) and there are sometimes where I see photos of a cute animal or I see a cute stuffed animal and I get an intense urge to start talking and acting like a baby. I restrain myself from doing it because, again, I feel shame, but idk if this is a normal thing or if this is considered age-regressing??

Let me know what you think and what your experience with this is",3.5284249084249097,5.344701659340664,4.572769230769231,83.88889743589743,73.61538461538461,8.15003663003663,28.616849816849808,8.841846274778883,2.2811658608058605,730,30,145,15,15,238,109,182,0.08800000000000001,0.8029999999999999,0.11,0.5842,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,0,0,8,8,0,2,11,0,20,1,0,0,0,33,32,16,0,7,8,2,3,2,0,2,0,2,0,1,15,9,0,3,7,1,0,3,2,4,0,0,8,8,22,4,10,21,3,18,0,1,2,1,8,5,0,9,12,102,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953435765505415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067257749798848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14164656164315606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586331567566298,0.0,0.0,0.17147039825306648,0.0,0.16280526994675276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858868900610835,0.0,0.09636549440845284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318635944218,0.0,0.19127233363640125,0.0,0.0,0.1733877375904652,0.0,0.16567800082110698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3971758786313785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591216286562422,0.1661339004597394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742115412012662,0.0,0.1920796997288684,0.0,0.0,0.13484181163217385,0.0,0.1716049101053284,0.2702365256355031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13053643739985682,0.16770028747955312,0.0,0.12001623642007213,0.0,0.0,0.14176069225802418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725736175073836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252977530733116,0.10864792179566092,0.0,0.0,0.09887245508309904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838818061786106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409027153406028,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bontreaux,2020/03/17,"I don’t know if I’m alive. I went on a trip abroad for four months. Everything was going ok, I was having a pretty good time and having fun. 

However, one day, I was in the car with some friends when an elk crossed the road while we were on a highway, forcing the driver to turn rapidly to the left. The co-pilot thought we were about to get into the opposite side of the road and into a ditch (which wasn’t true), but out of instinct he pulled the driver’s wheel to the right side violently, causing the car to lose control and fall down the road into a small hill. The car skidded because of the snow and then processed to roll over four times. 

I hit my head against the window and I remember distinctly feeling a wet drip coming from my head. I touched it once the car stopped rolling and thought it was blood. 

When we got out I saw I had instead hit an airbag and the thing that was dripping was melted snow that had gotten in from one of the windows. I was fine except for a small bump in my head. We all made it with small scratches and not much else. The EMT’s checked us and said there were no signs of concussion and that we were lucky and fine. 

After that however, I felt like things around me started to become “bad”. People that were close to me became distant, work became unbearable and I started to feel alone. All around me things began to change. I felt as if I was in that tv show “the good place”, because all I felt around me was manageable pain, but pain nonetheless. 

After that, I felt like it took an eternity to fly back home to my country. Time went by slowly and the things and people that made me happy were distant and cold, until they stopped hanging out with me. I didn’t understand why and I would constantly question myself what was going on.

Family members began to get sick and all I could do was watch from afar. It was torture. I thought I would have to prepare myself to never see them again. Every single day I would wake up and expect a message saying they were gone. Thankfully they were not. But it drained all the life out of me. And to make it worse, I had no one to talk about it and it made my job performance drop which made my job a whole lot more hellish. 

Things got a little better eventually and then the whole Coronavirus thing explored. I had to get an emergency flight two weeks before I was supposed to leave and it was so rushed (I booked my flight and had 3 hours to get everything ready) that I forgot tons of important things. 

My country closed down the borders 12 hours after my flight got in. I didn’t thing I would make it. I thought I would have to go back and continue living this solitary torture. I just couldn’t believe it when I landed. 

Now, I am finally home with my family. But now I can’t shake off this feeling that if I go to sleep I’ll wake up back to the country I was in and realise it was all but a dream and I am still stuck perpetually in that hell of a place. I am so happy to be home, I don’t want it to be over. Sometimes I just don’t understand how I survived that crash so it comes to reason I think I didn’t and I am just in the Purgatory. I am so afraid to go back there I can’t even start to feel sleepy. My heart is racing and all I want to do is cry. 

Am I alive? Am I dead? Is there any way to know? What is happening to me? How do I take this feeling away? 

Please help me.",2.6252545096413016,4.1446852438316455,3.52595454074228,91.69723784470249,75.37155297532657,6.605027990877048,23.91460190752644,7.240123139073775,0.7688479991706405,2619,80,576,29,56,836,285,689,0.128,0.7659999999999999,0.106,-0.9826,4,1,0,0,0,0,64.0,6,0,4,6,30,26,5,2,41,1,65,12,8,11,10,124,127,50,1,13,14,0,12,2,1,5,4,2,5,0,42,51,0,4,22,4,1,23,15,11,0,6,59,18,83,15,87,57,15,109,2,1,3,0,18,45,1,7,41,408,125,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388622395235863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041947368440139736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16473603642858758,0.0,0.0,0.057954332549556425,0.1897253563765677,0.051503727009870715,0.07520422655383734,0.06812534806918367,0.05248870743884499,0.0694969655583742,0.0,0.05455465854354442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336666086333016,0.06525370020937724,0.10627094571864357,0.0,0.0666587020350723,0.06918407079393589,0.04924981112210449,0.0,0.06775719270834482,0.07956240667380304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05152923051525876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0407418296217506,0.0,0.05197159544711316,0.0,0.1108755556754737,0.0,0.11630074024710953,0.0,0.15594691420016552,0.0,0.23690600567685566,0.06757202148772336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04765705672322933,0.0,0.1289097857056494,0.0,0.17528275015950487,0.1034755538358996,0.14800345921318586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05454713070219127,0.13132794705611067,0.0,0.0,0.18991734259387788,0.0,0.0,0.07309606911655163,0.04134561625184425,0.0,0.18562283367101354,0.0,0.1214930152150534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224240927682224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780004174998433,0.0,0.0,0.06531465694297646,0.06702005930999218,0.0,0.043569371768992934,0.0602715646365324,0.061823769292249676,0.05446827506958826,0.0,0.0,0.06900883698435595,0.0,0.05244169749012268,0.0,0.23346831041543084,0.08234935947210732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04923573665048506,0.0,0.045344981446919536,0.0,0.04757465457331349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06569165545866266,0.12539642258506678,0.0,0.13127266695266054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552810931830386,0.0,0.12889371176714068,0.06771072366072732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275500307947263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910041647788707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634216268537616,0.0,0.0,0.06987616931758239,0.05267796624546859,0.058675795821348964,0.049053748386734014,0.0,0.0,0.049154317837221184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061728743469340965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061007246986899126,0.0,0.13098117399369644,0.0,0.049261078511117565,0.10314149958357753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04637883860945328,0.049579420093161776,0.0,0.05679052003394286,0.0,0.0,0.3278419106827774,0.03952474202174129,0.0,0.19588144535120014,0.10790565200774316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853341127946075,0.0,0.06709469205554648,0.060256496311307126,0.12843084664380494,0.07419849266986503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727658738257856,0.048962043527182614,0.049479341202226,0.0,0.0,0.1143637351379996,0.05566039241948995,0.1377364036625264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04490682925643737,0.0,0.0628614654308026,0.21909341473834268,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Axel_My_Boi,2020/03/17,"Am I crazy? I often find myself talking to myself, out loud. Engaging in full conversations with myself. I always chalked it up to writers brain, needingnto sort out character thoughts. But, weirdly enough, my characters all seem to be a part of me, in each of my stories they take on an aspect from my pain and trauma inhale suffered, splitting it into different pieces. I find myself talking to them when I'm driving, studying, sitting alone, doing anything. Sometimes I just have conversations in my head with them. Constantly. I cant focus sometimes without being able to speak to myself. Often at school I get weird looks because I'm constantly whispering to myself. Making up stories for different characters, all which feel extremely personal because every story has a different element of my life in it. Am I crazy or is this just Writers Brain like I said?",6.309313725490195,8.549321712418305,6.658316993464055,70.03492647058826,67.16993464052288,9.283006535947713,36.27941176470589,9.725611199111238,4.194839215686277,694,36,100,16,12,224,98,153,0.132,0.836,0.032,-0.9254,3,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,3,0,5,7,0,0,3,0,9,5,3,1,2,23,19,4,0,0,5,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,7,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,7,24,2,26,15,7,17,0,1,1,0,10,12,0,5,4,82,29,2,0.1451796487525293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15036233221641687,0.0,0.0,0.12080109786128222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947048081557354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17700033274152044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32413700360076736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137752485727448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4550454990998658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500093861277226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232011562091301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340719256964208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26538313761742593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585037440416899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899620394977425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254467938620472,0.0709274430731709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121914340523254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690854288076137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448138219900434,0.0,0.0,0.1572154119454978,0.0,0.0,0.1267652694506085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809909176869725,0.0,0.0,0.14692955530909174,0.0,0.13216609965802534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28717276970051564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915702803168624,0.233379804719858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525642438537675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994800064959104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cappedfromthestart,2020/03/17,"Who am I? Hello, I'm an 18 year old male. I've been struggling for so long trying to find out who I am or where I belong. Every other day my personality changes and I make decisions that change my path because each time I think I've finally found out who I am. I feel empty every night because I dont know what the hell I am supposed to be. It doesnt help that every so often I get a comment from someone asking, ""Why do you look so different every day? One day you're a hippie, one day you're dressing up, one day you're sagging your pants talking about your music career. You're so, different."" The last time I had a solid personality or place to belong for longer than a month was back in 8th grade, and I was emo. I have been through mental hospitals and such for depression and drug abuse but nobody has ever helped me with this. I just want to belong.",3.2331160365058658,4.316401542372887,4.786666666666669,84.99504563233378,73.12429378531074,7.254063450673621,24.34984789222077,7.61054688173877,1.0818877879182958,671,19,140,8,13,226,109,177,0.08199999999999999,0.9009999999999999,0.017,-0.8515,2,0,1,0,1,0,19.0,0,3,0,0,11,3,1,1,7,0,15,1,0,1,1,22,25,11,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,9,8,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,3,0,3,6,2,20,0,16,18,1,22,1,1,1,0,15,6,1,3,16,88,29,2,0.0,0.14598732132860695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518757317621935,0.0,0.0,0.09474323322386914,0.0,0.15021906848695524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606861478393733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39731113412099706,0.0,0.10612322307246276,0.0,0.0,0.2574628342414353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14440478192825076,0.0,0.14288802536452996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145326164203936,0.4152492493361258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06230022236261841,0.0,0.0,0.13497387831519936,0.1126144993841686,0.0,0.0,0.13509675429802614,0.0,0.0,0.06437373540998001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16517422607690513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771467231145688,0.10043508423421617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090396757151456,0.10346793356230023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822456704713372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12416977865592807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834748437456693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562710472457426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929137375994887,0.0,0.2504770629991162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21516977282948715,0.12873141712071767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439802101746304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288090367155706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903398577188302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789499500329644,0.0,0.0,0.14369304556286386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836535759127731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267425173187342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118061688844703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934516723294707
mentalhealth,stranger0101010203,2020/03/17,"Dysfuntional and alone I feel so fucking empty. Like theres a void inside me, and i fill it with food and alcohol. Nothing is fun, im bored always. Im scared of everyone, because i give them the keys to my self esteem, but i dont know how to stop. I fucking hate my job. I have no real close friends, because i dont know how to be close to people in a way that isnt borderline obsessive, so i just keep a distance. Too much of a distance, i dont even talk to the people i live with. Not that id have anything to talk to them about, all i do is focus on my problems. Every day i wake up and try to force myself to be positive or at least feel okay, but i just end up operating on auto pilot. I want so badly to exist any other way, and i see exactly what im doing wrong but i cant stop myself. I feel so lonely, every day. Feel like no one really cares. Feel like everyone wants me to be something else, someone more fun, someone who doesnt care what other people think, and i dont blame them. I fucking wish i could stop caring. Wish i could talk to people. Wish i wasnt bored all the time.",1.569912653975365,2.7993520382978763,3.9460246360582296,88.80105263157894,77.55319148936171,6.649496080627098,22.15565509518477,7.273561745256523,0.6558936170212761,839,23,189,10,19,293,120,235,0.20800000000000002,0.619,0.17300000000000001,-0.816,1,3,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,3,0,12,22,4,2,7,1,19,6,1,2,3,43,42,16,0,8,7,0,5,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,8,10,2,4,8,0,0,1,11,12,0,1,1,6,32,10,23,36,5,18,0,1,1,3,10,8,3,1,10,119,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918343237193318,0.0,0.08899881184031946,0.0,0.0,0.07150164552639496,0.0,0.0,0.0584361654209604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071405907214855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174896598435497,0.10476572873758996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628377684524799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721814820347125,0.0,0.0,0.11083703532713413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4028429243846549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178449448387926,0.0,0.07610954100409563,0.0,0.0,0.05675674980009,0.0,0.1448014910910402,0.16422189583000024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172469934101743,0.1227785386032006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390835296123586,0.0,0.06639023504248805,0.2383260402403051,0.0,0.08243304100507348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483927354977955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784613385393139,0.0,0.08527346055955606,0.07637960240822844,0.0,0.0,0.09445108483751424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12594493715284832,0.0,0.07587882745738771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316932230501904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245330780750904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058229207741875115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382955084011339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222455695754992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780852287737776,0.055049729671373414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603212601552128,0.0,0.06847604403096981,0.0,0.08964498666265955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14561846056989133,0.06615403905166395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21552700284522705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072047402573346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0550612457679971,0.0,0.0,0.05010717608804911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834164683805125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136890103016376,0.13641637992074124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964499312689726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939522818586242,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IcyYear9,2020/03/17,"I feel lost Hi I'm new to this and I'm not sure how it all works but I needed to let it out. Lately I have been feeling down and out and it seems as though everything is going downhill. I used to be a perfect student and now it seems as though I have failed at everything.

Things started about four years ago when I began living with my mom. I had never lived with her so things were a little rough at first because we weren't used to being in the same household but I felt as though things would get better with time. Things were good but then this year they got a lot worse. It seemed like we were always getting into disagreements and never really getting along. It has gotten to the point where I don't even want to be around her anymore.

I've tried to tell her how I feel about things but then she gets even more mad or says ""this generation is too soft"", so I have stopped telling her how I feel about anything. I don't want to ask her for therapy because I feel like she will use that against me. I also am an only child so I really have no one to confide in. All of my family members support me tremendously, however they don't really know whats going on. My uncle is the only one who she tells anything to and he tries to tell her to calm down and see things from my perspective but then she gets mad at him and finds a way to turn it back on me.

I am not saying I am perfect because I have made many mistakes, but I feel like I have lost my mom and I have no one to talk to about it so I'm just stuck here having to deal with this until I am out of the house.",2.3287110187110187,3.5544749699699736,3.5083033033033035,92.72167879417884,75.57657657657657,6.5645183645183645,21.816701316701327,7.010146845296331,0.3728425502425501,1227,30,281,12,26,398,164,333,0.132,0.767,0.10099999999999999,-0.8345,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,2,0,2,8,25,16,2,0,9,0,31,0,0,7,7,65,70,35,0,5,10,2,9,3,0,2,0,2,0,1,21,21,0,1,12,0,0,2,10,6,0,5,14,12,46,10,48,50,5,39,0,3,1,0,30,17,0,5,22,210,67,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264134497889599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553323337176377,0.06818672572009833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126971059350005,0.0,0.0,0.13487130582826834,0.07295047881637329,0.07660967180777375,0.0,0.0,0.06301242228781027,0.0,0.14986295681109574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724757354012315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448407724762269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082508494144892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472979146077166,0.0,0.07725262976752957,0.0,0.24861012991999776,0.11708634779545675,0.07868226765957001,0.0,0.07489835579242002,0.06970433914197648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21407043341621415,0.0,0.09314508832143506,0.06873351479526374,0.06554074900765204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455619208814577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04503609789934044,0.0,0.09244013388492936,0.0,0.0,0.08379667551573858,0.0,0.12010594752404825,0.08213273191244423,0.1447219503190202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17891033609356066,0.06966867161769283,0.0,0.07754052514477529,0.0,0.0830817091507604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19195139568037256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060762891246224665,0.12640563312877584,0.07914522164343506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16658885210109586,0.12464924230857978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746669468204627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749263350932924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033557842462992,0.0,0.0,0.06530139549045046,0.2238052570654336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05800272706520392,0.0,0.0,0.06851161965150049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299283509280094,0.0772343688920045,0.0,0.0,0.06586614283637006,0.2865022400335507,0.0,0.0937138895791269,0.0,0.3266529047163854,0.0,0.24153844496375096,0.0,0.047784134859710524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127368724784133,0.08913514039068833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21232849163465314,0.0,0.0,0.09666929201706258,0.06504595952236193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05965861691353151,0.0,0.08351130878878213,0.05821301710486972,0.0,0.0,0.10554276044950893
mentalhealth,Vin_NYC,2020/03/17,"Does Lithium always make you gain weight? How does it make you gain weight? Hi,

I am curious about the weight gain side effect with Lithium.  Does it affect metabolism or insulin?  Cause water retention?  Or does it simply increase hunger?  

I was on Mirtazipine which is notorious for weight gain.  I gained about 25 pounds on it over. Months but was able to get it all off and keep it off (while still taking it) by not giving into cravings (which was very difficult at first).  Mirtazipine made me crave carbs like crazy for whatever reason.

Can you keep the weight off if you are disciplined when taking Lithium?  Or is it like some antipsychotics that affect metabolism, insulin, kidney function and/or cause water retention etc.

Thanks to any and all responses!",4.816015037593985,7.919854924812032,4.351090225563913,80.78798872180451,74.93984962406014,7.7097744360902265,25.28947368421053,8.634040054169528,2.2185879699248114,607,21,99,13,14,183,83,133,0.083,0.75,0.166,0.8936,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,4,0,7,5,4,0,0,2,0,8,11,1,10,2,26,18,10,0,1,6,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,11,4,8,3,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,4,5,8,3,16,14,5,15,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,5,7,62,19,0,0.11803536765909264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821488150852177,0.0,0.0,0.0802680976134085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24250967384864125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.413174182659112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164063618022107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040082343242868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06166860787173476,0.11323028015784198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20983051634589106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533223688303265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168791885482658,0.15757904894419064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421470434239344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136001671627028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426319708505157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749581359376992,0.0,0.0,0.10867110798871302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973915399824722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7186763944779359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,supremeeditz,2020/03/17,"Something Is Wrong With My Mind (HELP!) Hi, this is my first Reddit post ever, so if it is messed up...my bad. Ok, so I would be doing an activity such as basketball or drawing or video editing. Then questions would start to appear. Like while I am video editing, I would ask questions like...""How can I make this a good looking edit"", then I would think like ""What makes something look good to the human brain"", then when I get an answer to the question it doesn't satisfy me. Another example, was when I was playing basketball a question popped up saying ""How does you know how to shoot without thinking"", and obviously the answer is because of muscle memory, but then another question would be like ""What is muscle memory"" ""What is a muscle"", Just dumb question that hinders my well-being. It is so weird and straining. Like for example, let's say someone asked""Why does painting look better than another one"", the regular answer would be ""Because it does, it just looks nice"". That answer wouldn't satisfy my brain for some reason. I would do tons of research on why certain people like certain things, to where I would go into brain chemistry and wiring and everything, and it still wouldn't satisfy me. Imagine basically never finding the answer to a question, and constantly trying to find it. But, it is like I DO KNOW THE ANSWER, but my brain won't shut up with the questions.

**TL;DR:** Imagine basically never finding the answer to a question, and constantly trying to find it. But, it is like you DO KNOW THE ANSWER, but your brain won't shut up with the questions. HELP!",4.638573059360726,6.716458565068492,5.198150684931509,79.46460045662103,71.22602739726027,7.606392694063928,29.97488584474885,8.344100000000001,2.431424200913242,1239,52,211,20,24,397,132,292,0.085,0.7809999999999999,0.133,0.9322,0,0,2,1,0,0,65.0,0,3,0,2,13,21,1,1,17,1,34,5,5,5,6,75,50,28,0,11,11,0,0,7,0,12,0,2,0,1,18,11,0,0,30,3,0,2,8,6,0,2,2,6,20,15,24,32,2,26,0,0,4,0,20,8,1,15,22,152,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845805217952411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05485408453105806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048991960166073587,0.071536618523546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05189410191085479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32750877945827195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681569526797742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15404313516530285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05307574824952327,0.0,0.0,0.0527341526760096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21451498970957733,0.049909725772869465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030655757616812288,0.0,0.033346889680308016,0.09842919155577287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865849335772966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674028864076463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060000125489318976,0.0,0.2293288090202883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19709205142111846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833329300976515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05924597417460733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050900651612227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03976033643208211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040678509770748036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05619533232463091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6573048297834703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06032864021455351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332292734849608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04971593473026977,0.09034321266039454,0.0,0.0,0.04153113332021522,0.0,0.046858682589940866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03898168822292674,0.07519434802581855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967422522956479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052756718008105774,0.0,0.10589182129367307,0.0,0.0,0.05656151364541645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33345364215534257,0.06415293080785459,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,80N3,2020/03/17,"I need advice I often at times feel that there is a big answer to all my problems, that I am just not seeing. I am a outted, gay 15 year old, loner with a ego that nags at me like a tick. My mind is at a civil war with its self, one that has the ideals of class and the simple fact of knowing better the other half longing for madness, fun ,and sin. Its wanting to declare its own independence for my brain.  I get a stroke of jealousy from others with a passionate hatred and disrespectful for myself each day. Especially for a certain boy in school which I can never seem to run away from. I love him more than anything in the world, and if I could buy his love for a million dollars I would. But at the same time he seems to be a sort of arch nemesis to me.  he goes gallivanting off with his friends every day, with me being jealous from a distance that I can't join them. I have had a crush on him for almost 4 years now he seems so fun, and yet I still hear things about him that I hate. The way that he is controlling and is a "" Do things my way because I all way get my way"" type. Also because he seems to lack any sort of common sense.  Just the other day I had heard from a friend of mine that he had been "" Played for nudes"" by some 20 year old guy on the internet. The only thoughts in my head at that time was ""does that Piano Boy have any sort of brains in his head"". But I'm so emotionally attached to him that if something were to happen to him I would go insane. My life is so muddled up that I cant even verbally explained all the things that I need help with. But for now I will leave asking, ""How can I help myself"" and ""how can I get myself out of this unhealthy emotional attachment that I have to my friend"". My family members have not been able to afford any sort of mental treatment for my health, my school counsellors at times seem to not get the full grasp but my whole situation, and my friends; while I know they have the same feelings as I do are not, in the same situation as I am,  and that is why I am here at Reddit. Yes it is not the perfect place for mental advice but in days past I have seen how the internet has gather together to solve great mysteries of the world and I like to believe that the greatest mystery of my world is myself. So I ask? Can you help me.",6.99131207028266,4.807042153361344,7.251122994652411,81.61232620320855,65.49159663865547,10.167150496562265,31.72039724980901,8.296473431620573,2.061801680672269,1779,48,396,18,22,581,223,476,0.073,0.804,0.12300000000000001,0.9795,1,0,1,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,2,4,19,24,5,0,31,1,42,13,6,5,7,78,72,28,1,11,14,0,3,2,4,3,3,2,0,4,28,19,0,1,13,1,2,2,8,7,0,3,10,7,63,17,70,56,14,54,1,0,2,5,36,26,0,14,24,293,91,4,0.0801528477738454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566488703808047,0.0,0.0,0.08026149899063327,0.0,0.0,0.06409820340631787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16352005513344334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595896425263913,0.0,0.14986418565886714,0.0,0.07530623895393207,0.0,0.0,0.09772086410220016,0.0,0.0,0.09030481181776932,0.0,0.07088868030388132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789541725078051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989823431335102,0.06399552685083265,0.0,0.0,0.2067678237379059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014229722740158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18032233093441144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052940200015113834,0.0,0.0675322312134427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07556097146040766,0.0,0.08105537631612941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477035654493495,0.0,0.16750621910016486,0.0,0.045552710512978135,0.0,0.0,0.08836879763507455,0.0,0.07936392090888261,0.07087889857756667,0.0,0.0,0.0791343430813433,0.16451989182621596,0.08519872906746011,0.090338084772662,0.0,0.16117429293987054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809981791689135,0.0,0.0,0.08487029263491244,0.0,0.0,0.05661432678398773,0.07831726549115113,0.0,0.0,0.0709327480168273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14468214898401205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155043681009,0.0,0.08093152724312304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886464202251995,0.061818817469517125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16821386115677964,0.0,0.05431364402356237,0.060959852557658935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651496268390555,0.0,0.0,0.08374266625964133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669545044103125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16223792220689268,0.06387144225157049,0.3648407114143824,0.08361690091467998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18019031834095528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170557813014845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401016776984728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974997152205914,0.0,0.0,0.06363240797245613,0.18695108043622627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04727622630569165,0.2544863990196404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232547813793815,0.08948779211628456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387656672198088,0.0,0.0,0.15484741815604752
mentalhealth,moonpie_mcnasty,2020/03/17,"I want to have sex with everyone. The title isn’t clickbait. That’s exactly how I feel 
I’m relatively new to reddit so don’t bully me too much lmao. 
I’m 21(f), relatively fair attraction. 5’7” and kind of a chubby/thick. I’m aware I have major self esteem issues but I’m not horribly ugly or anything. 
My deal is i need the attention of everyone, male or female, and I CRAVE validation. Doesn’t matter who you are, what gender, age, or level of attraction. I think about what sex would be like with nearly everyone I encounter around my age and older. If someone flirts with me, I’m not one to turn them down even if they are being disrespectful. This, of course, has hindered my relationships in the past. It all comes down to the fact that I’m a “whore”, I have no “self worth” but I’m aware of it (This is what past partners have said but that isn’t far from the truth tbh). 
Honestly some of the time I don’t even want sex, I just crave the feeling of being wanted and validated. I want men to drool over me, I want my body to be seen as an object. Doesn’t matter if I’m in a relationship or not. Y’all can roast me but also I’m looking for advice or any reddit diagnosis lmao. I really should not be acting the way that I do. I’ve talked to my therapist about other things but never this. I’m repulsed by my own behavior and mind which is why I’m embarrassed to admit it all. Help.",1.5077067669172948,3.5739161403508777,3.6989411027568937,86.67217105263157,80.57894736842105,7.018796992481202,20.354010025062657,8.07648339933343,0.9449273182957394,1080,29,229,21,28,370,151,285,0.066,0.748,0.18600000000000005,0.9789,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,2,2,0,10,9,0,1,12,0,25,6,2,1,6,52,51,22,0,11,18,0,2,1,1,2,0,1,0,5,17,10,0,0,5,0,1,2,12,2,0,1,2,6,28,7,31,42,6,20,0,0,2,4,17,9,0,9,9,150,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13191817092595068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795759627816803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180305196999254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109158845801084,0.12017655676593565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499519899252986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628854819142012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917668081004891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17832938948032334,0.0,0.0,0.38698820658973104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13651776691839668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048609957299104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409025048855979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057931018020775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595304766896501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336405153877678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13630917373617765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923882815891932,0.10009906950021746,0.10411853350183108,0.13038160099711446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147792203664064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577411225804804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648297090593175,0.0,0.0,0.2898739746517318,0.0,0.0,0.12841370826050386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28166404520750865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11438309655661467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085060219200597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15674271194140474,0.089686460329752,0.08650106266142632,0.0,0.0,0.0787182330897909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468387107638417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39812564797737415,0.10715487511206576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181440905520588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589847891511832,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fluffyomlettes,2020/03/17,"I don’t feel like breathing anymore Hi, first of all sorry for using a TW account. I just need to let my feelings out before I explode. 

There is a song that used to console me, saying how spring will come - and with it a better mood. I have been waiting for years to feel even remotely happy. My depression has been with me ever since I can remember and although my family tried to understand no one ever realised how bad it really is.

I moved abroad nearly 5 years ago, went through major trauma but ended up luckily stabilising my life to a point about 2 years in. I initially loved it, had some brief drug encounters etc.

Nowadays I spend my days locked inside, unhappy unless I look like a perfect doll, dealing with an eating disorder and major insecurity complex. There is no way I will leave my apartment unless I feel immaculate. I have tried multiple ADs, but nothing had long lasting effects. Therapy never worked for me and I have no real friends that I can talk to. The only time I feel happy is after starving myself/binging or drinking at least a litre of wine (I am luckily able to restrict these harmful habits, but I feel dead without them). As much as I love my family we have a certain limit that we simply don’t cross. Feelings were never really considered, even as a child.

It has been incredibly difficult to even continue living lately. I don’t want to end my life, but I can’t keep going. It’s so difficult to just keep breathing. 

Even when it gets better it’s never for long. I tired recovering from my eating disorder (made my mental health worse), being spontaneous (caused major anxiety), talking to people (rejection because people felt uncomfortable).

I have no idea how to keep going and simply want to fall asleep while never waking up - but I am also terrified.

I don’t feel like living, but fear the unknown of death. I feel like I am in a limbo. I don’t deserve to exist. And yet I waste space in a 1st world country moping around while someone else deserves my space is much more.

The thoughts of ending it all consume my mind more and more very day, I stress about my existence and future. I BEG you - please help me realise why this isn’t ok.",4.3470687645687685,6.163050519230772,5.494632867132868,78.12157925407928,71.45192307692308,8.119347319347321,28.471445221445226,8.754623652393294,2.412901602564103,1720,66,301,32,33,570,230,416,0.16899999999999998,0.6779999999999999,0.152,-0.7804,0,0,3,0,0,1,52.0,2,1,1,7,20,25,0,3,14,1,34,15,4,8,10,73,64,29,2,3,12,0,10,4,1,2,5,2,0,1,13,16,4,6,16,3,2,8,16,10,0,2,10,13,51,14,45,50,13,52,0,2,1,2,14,14,0,2,33,212,64,1,0.07707721528010354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832430077275982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163862121226792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058963858719663614,0.0,0.07643988629228479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861506291788493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435625524145337,0.046985555029903765,0.0,0.06558703319821671,0.0,0.0,0.1363370666035803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917953198877299,0.0,0.06639519608075088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941685483348163,0.07946322450462118,0.06638649257840326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766743327355364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550632737217765,0.08938509932861699,0.15773846715887085,0.06438812303428303,0.0,0.2048026050258684,0.0,0.08596146947902583,0.20363509503991287,0.13944150794941315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532307773918007,0.08673329593151187,0.3507530036113116,0.16519193399058538,0.0740062139903533,0.0,0.0,0.0655618399423424,0.0,0.0,0.059549665327108675,0.0,0.040269663739110916,0.0,0.08760951537761201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641002578213291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192947554967188,0.0,0.0,0.05166323268428552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701079418034811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20552931127522509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06282821781216906,0.08694645608314412,0.08161364191031406,0.0,0.07881667476501199,0.10888383319279793,0.15062413626132534,0.0,0.1361211864247536,0.1364218200887521,0.06472544844257302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13913039217138845,0.07293232474713315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077675704247836,0.0,0.07782601518871132,0.0,0.0,0.08192088180352057,0.11332124369786448,0.0571517784883482,0.23778680033445804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395766684525101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222951584780832,0.058620695452860125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687127229749402,0.0,0.0,0.08460763652421012,0.07286288199737191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773074533866601,0.0987552755666592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731345960721443,0.0,0.0,0.06129489524363279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06375906897366705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530727438181415,0.0,0.0,0.08628163210151715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829168968663169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390349201824767,0.0,0.0,0.0881445130187178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06119069932390842,0.044944344068374366,0.08858892044806613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466073938780016,0.0,0.0,0.08024009938058088,0.0,0.13313993318164413,0.0,0.06359677478508331,0.09092427714798508,0.06118030584028649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145135076823199,0.06955019819636825,0.0,0.0,0.07429968502317838,0.0,0.05611313070911883,0.0,0.07854826726114797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489055986938552
mentalhealth,TheBassClarinetBoy,2020/03/17,"Unlovable Hello everyone. I’m a 16yo with depression, anxiety, autism and adhd. I constantly feel so alone. It’s like a hole in my chest that can never be filled. I feel like nobody cares about me. If I die, more people would be happy than would be upset. I hate myself. I’m a burden to others. The world would be better if I’m gone.",0.2180718954248384,2.592078911764709,2.627254901960786,89.68375816993465,90.76470588235294,5.375163398692812,14.908496732026146,6.937597516519254,-0.0203875816993464,258,5,52,4,9,88,50,68,0.29600000000000004,0.524,0.18,-0.8654,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,2,10,1,1,4,0,8,1,1,0,1,10,16,4,1,5,2,0,2,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,1,2,7,5,5,8,1,6,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,2,4,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27544830121490016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373772866849512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753338344609824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027046837319372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23367995977863756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476787771151705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974056405556322,0.0,0.2378686138601891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21900600266622744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317761361969461,0.16373722162191665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243982738448682,0.0,0.2262829822458979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22394656613835626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676960256734706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588952145646676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.488441455171104,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,onomatopeia24,2020/03/17,Advice?? I’m currently a college student and ever since I was in junior high I went through periods of feeling emotionally numb. I don’t really feel sad but I don’t really feel happy. Sometimes it lasts for weeks and sometimes it lasts for months. I’m not really sure what this is or if anyone else has experienced this/has insight on how to deal with it?,2.6791428571428604,5.095863485714286,4.661428571428573,79.45357142857145,78.42857142857143,8.0,25.714285714285715,8.841846274778883,2.3410000000000006,284,11,52,7,7,97,51,70,0.09699999999999999,0.7979999999999999,0.105,0.3818,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,2,14,11,6,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,4,4,2,8,9,0,11,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,2,7,31,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19596794523381975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402240756054346,0.2054796320551429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20675065437435627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675276412990314,0.22558347587879965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18140229769943195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30420115079436244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21348136763306969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118843080056845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269380327017845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16007122066830684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854182480061442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16589094282020694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3966835944439808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18900906335059356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16086320796473622,0.0,0.0,0.18590503493102686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,legogoavocado,2020/03/17,"Developing violent thoughts I've been depressed for years, but I was only diagnosed two years ago by a doctor. I got therapy and medication, however I stopped it all because I moved too far from where I was getting treatment. I know I should have continued it but a part of me was lazy, and I felt hopeless. I've been off medication for 6 months now and my emotions are getting bad. When I was depressed and someone made me sad, i would just sulk around all day and lay in bed. However, when someone makes me mad now I develop horrible anger issues. At the moment they're very uncontrollable, but thankfully I am still at a state where I can prevent myself from taking action. I've thought of doxxing, beating, wishing death, and sometimes even killing people whenever someone does something bad to me. Instead of being upset I just get violently angry and I can see what's happening and I want it to stop because I feel like I'm not me anymore. I grew up being very timid and shy, never took action, never stood up for myself and I think that anger has been building up for so long. I feel like a bomb waiting to go off. I just want advice on how to control these emotions. I am in college and I would go to the counseling center but school is closed for the next few weeks. If anyone has advice on how I can calm my thoughts I would really appreciate it. I'm scaring myself and I'm scaring the people around me too and i don't want this.",4.281240114420324,5.689292325088342,5.30175668854114,81.05419316843346,70.97879858657244,8.075988557967356,31.144034999158677,8.563005593585519,2.473024701329295,1140,50,216,19,21,375,155,283,0.31,0.615,0.075,-0.9981,2,0,1,0,0,1,26.0,0,0,0,2,19,21,6,5,8,0,24,4,0,5,4,54,54,23,2,9,9,0,3,2,0,4,4,0,1,0,8,16,0,5,8,0,0,7,4,17,0,1,15,4,37,4,29,33,4,45,0,4,1,0,0,18,0,1,21,149,45,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19851535907272724,0.09003989574897081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073486760898608,0.07102343366982987,0.0,0.0,0.1808461423552123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696213630347133,0.12383806138523268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139247300113686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550731689643659,0.0,0.1749723832748653,0.10309624290088487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039660705807987,0.08888875665961925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285158660081999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708917076666082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271850090623556,0.14513005716226055,0.09752769830209676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15920585870208812,0.0,0.11545455338729267,0.0,0.08123861431355535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898222244922695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601765911123892,0.0,0.0,0.11237742198699642,0.0,0.05582283148770362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924859363987526,0.0,0.0,0.08989046590853188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961124935446112,0.06780194079943676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20465176825759596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107600406348177,0.10795789453865214,0.0,0.0,0.1566814330365749,0.0,0.10802590921575493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725218183882324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999556630010862,0.0,0.14083829775631884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507139199460342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033881085158628,0.1027990795714701,0.08094193250318632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581918926566919,0.0781972124632548,0.10046003454206348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811177342565365,0.16984209454839855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763715781131215,0.0,0.0,0.09351639167551344,0.11615958997436765,0.0,0.0,0.0650850045671287,0.0,0.24191703942594706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285329537814655,0.0,0.0,0.09922378077669282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676196289418207,0.17973427483766732,0.0,0.08147714528671632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680596071669012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164673847742619,0.0,0.0,0.13082162989538867
mentalhealth,Nemozzz,2020/03/17,"I'm really worried about placements. Hello,

So this is half a rant, half asking for advice.

I am in my second year of studying Computer Science with Games Programming at University and I am really worried about placements. This whole year we have been told to constantly go look for placements which I have been doing but have only found a few that I am interested in. I applied for these and so far have been rejected after submitting the technical tests because I clearly am not good enough to pass. These placements are very competitive, with only one or two spots.

Not to sound cocky or anything, but I have worked damned hard throughout my time in College and University, but feel like I have messed up somewhere? Like I have gotten firsts in all of my modules, firsts in every coursework I have submitted and passed everything university wise so far by a mile, but then I get to these placements and they expect me to be far better and know a hell of a lot more than I do!

I don't know if it's me doing something wrong, whether the placements are too competitive, whether the course is bad or what. Nobody on my course that I know has a placement. Additionally, every placement is asking for stuff we have barely even been taught, like a programming language called C++ - they expect us to know this in a great deal of depth, however, we have barely been taught it?

I have made my own projects, spent months upon months on my coursework, researched content that we aren't being taught, sacrificed a tonne of my life to get this far, and it just feels like I'm never going to meet their standards!

My uni has been on strike for a month and is now entirely online due to coronavirus which I don't feel has helped at all.

I'm honestly burnt out at this point and can't face applying for any more placements, however at the same time know I will be really disadvantaged if I don't get one, plus not getting one will really affect my mental health.

Anyone got any advice?

Thanks",9.455267379679148,7.678610355614978,8.639197860962568,72.30820855614974,60.417112299465245,11.794652406417113,36.97326203208557,10.46071229359064,3.667277005347594,1579,56,289,28,17,496,184,374,0.10400000000000001,0.773,0.12300000000000001,0.8543,2,1,1,0,0,0,37.0,5,0,3,4,9,17,2,0,14,0,43,3,1,2,4,53,73,25,0,4,15,0,4,4,0,2,2,1,0,0,18,18,0,0,9,1,1,4,9,6,0,9,15,6,37,11,44,53,10,42,1,1,1,0,17,23,2,6,19,207,55,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038136338709741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418357569023066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291901328873461,0.0,0.0858182772593001,0.0,0.1949861763573295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707423582672841,0.06357161838851537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922322612217332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648739909451267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126958353866919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751401746587064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775504544992318,0.0,0.06887974689320656,0.0,0.1757304653849988,0.0,0.09372529759307983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581900088230125,0.1490035051812082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17741079218967998,0.0,0.11434392978554432,0.0,0.0,0.21793997701866347,0.0,0.1185359771794469,0.08746992984878232,0.08340683195108495,0.1149753951179483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341953810124476,0.0,0.0,0.11085086365586362,0.0,0.0,0.06990053242602294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865635735093857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366010136525879,0.20379497708200908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757375550417558,0.0,0.0,0.08866000578043133,0.0,0.09867768751611404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509549637883092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24971964514638306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043159072542314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21200014651187485,0.15862800720888853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985837312356176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672324584941353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028425661954817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938222070885406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601229699765952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12161970580185273,0.0,0.0,0.09964949242984146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018720134350199,0.0,0.12544290333562452,0.0,0.0,0.08604665614367125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643130304082425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592125983729793,0.21181445967419935,0.0,0.0,0.11402008425878847,0.0,0.13431319320806107
mentalhealth,linglingfromhk,2020/03/17,"coronavirus is driving me insane I am an international student from Hong Kong studying in the UK. There has been a lot of people going back home because of the fear that there will be a huge outbreak in the UK after Boris Johnson's notion of herd immunity. 

However, I choose to stay in the UK bc 1. I think leaving rn is more dangerous than staying 2. My dad has health complications and if I had the virus, he might have a higher chance to catch it and have serious consequences. 3. I could handle everything alone here in the UK and I barely went out of my room even though I am not self-isolating.

Seeing nearly all of my close friends are leaving, even for those who originally said they were going to stay, really affected me a lot. I feel betrayed and lonely. I was meant to meet my long distance bf in mid April but now there is a high chance that the trip will be postponed. That makes me even sadder as my final close social support is not going to be here to comfort me irl.

I just hope I have made the right decision to stay in the UK as rn I feel like I have made the wrong choice.",4.887318982387477,5.397597552511416,5.7052348336594925,82.02051369863015,68.90867579908675,8.814220482713635,28.42824527071102,8.841846274778883,2.0227231572080893,860,28,175,14,14,282,134,219,0.11199999999999999,0.7929999999999999,0.095,-0.2127,1,3,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,12,10,1,1,16,0,24,2,0,5,1,29,39,9,0,3,5,1,2,1,2,3,2,1,2,0,6,7,0,0,6,0,0,7,2,5,0,0,9,4,23,5,26,23,4,33,0,1,1,0,9,15,0,5,8,119,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327360176647225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854780380440734,0.0,0.07812568130303002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232603204037947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25394715238133025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151827327257636,0.0,0.0,0.1442166178944586,0.12960398081106447,0.09155815640619652,0.0,0.14039397671278894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901677594500727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21851034024653015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362290195794068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540900346970347,0.12855580960878846,0.12729266899363642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714077283457333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06261293103064881,0.0,0.0,0.11341834349141855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21791558973990569,0.0,0.24253784194981706,0.08554838083496301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595843780195094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885061541413553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210313979480864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944868902119588,0.12191034293155599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212762622508847,0.0,0.13369974595343856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13064387480643727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5464097717480508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14543544487280838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212031531404608,0.1259174113150176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188064173177723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140123800380643,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RegalMOM,2020/03/17,"What should I do about my brother After not seeing him for about 4 months, my brother who is 22 years old has been acting very strange since I last saw him. It’s been about 4 days since he has returned. Sometimes when talking and interacting with the family he randomly laughs and at other times he randomly nods his head. My mother just showed me a text that he sent her today and it said, “hello mother am i adopted?” She told me that yesterday at around 10pm she also saw him just standing in the open doorway to our backyard. When she asked him about it, he said the voices in his head told him to go there. 

I have no idea how he interacts with other people outside the family. What should I do?",4.156690647482012,5.336212187050361,4.772007194244607,85.60707553956837,71.01438848920864,7.5743884892086335,25.41079136690648,7.908726449838941,1.3287202877697846,550,16,110,7,10,176,87,139,0.035,0.941,0.024,-0.1162,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,0,12,1,0,0,5,0,11,2,2,1,0,16,21,7,0,2,3,4,0,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,10,7,0,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,9,6,22,1,15,10,0,22,0,0,3,0,33,6,0,2,12,75,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14705651748826484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637008096789496,0.17191203550203973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185936362942069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34670966518548274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450874773706002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3774477452378127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20758907523232348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498946395902324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467789949830052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929612945480178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748595616283487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3498424082338075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653627348848558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30423090124849883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18187160401364294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780356603119504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722755618962526,0.0,0.17430592307941528,0.3514289556397098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15172825153198682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184189303597704
mentalhealth,annie_lucky,2020/03/17,"Is it normal for a therapist to confront the parent, in a straightforward way, informing them that they’re part of the reason why their child is struggling mentally When my brother was younger, around his last year of school, he was going through some stuff and my dad suggested to see a therapist to which my brother agreed to do so.

After the therapist had a few sessions with my brother, the therapist told my father that he wanted to have a session with him alone since he felt that he is part of the reason why my brother had been struggling.

I wasn’t at all surprised that the therapist had that assumption about my father, I was just surprised that he had decided to have a session with him(without my brother present).

My dad has a short temper, and at the time he couldn’t take criticism or an insult, even it was a joke (it has gotten better).

He was pissed and decided to stop contacting the therapist and of course made my brother stop going as well.

My brother is fine now, when I asked him about it once, he just said that it was nothing and that he has moved passed it when he started going to college.

I just wanted to know if what the therapist did was completely normal and professional considering my brother wasn’t an adult at the time and so it was best to confront my father about it bluntly.

I was surprised because I always thought that a therapist’s job is to basically help his client by identifying his/her problem and helping him/her to cope with it or find a solution to it and basically not involve any of the clients friends/relatives directly.

My question is : Was the therapist’s approach uncommon or was/is my understanding of how therapy works wrong?",13.019828473413375,8.137368232704404,11.714734133790738,62.5639708404803,56.924528301886795,15.337221269296744,49.34934248141795,12.563389971838223,5.967247798742138,1350,65,240,30,11,432,147,318,0.105,0.8170000000000001,0.078,-0.8701,2,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,2,3,16,17,5,2,24,0,31,1,1,4,1,45,48,20,0,7,8,14,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,22,14,0,2,11,1,0,6,4,9,1,0,24,3,27,8,36,23,6,26,0,0,1,0,43,6,1,6,13,172,49,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856238069658916,0.0,0.0,0.06311701673451292,0.0,0.0,0.05158365802104478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752658297664223,0.07091371357770816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04624019632871871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960461305263887,0.06708713691493945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953199521555444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05010117879883514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07283221113980988,0.0,0.06932963455883127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932957337887316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168733862044294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527388212569848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04168764689535431,0.06183153790072723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177535761514266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644349017704437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062132405599276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864260007948513,0.07278443412580418,0.0,0.0,0.08078256195860344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422744034708028,0.16428605306355787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258250770692794,0.0,0.0,0.08497439494431419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559821096015267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215499561266474,0.0,0.0,0.07676879900452299,0.060446211904598625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274762243847694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05369020225211927,0.0,0.0,0.12683550935714605,0.0,0.15859917669928414,0.08683524918303967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570331403186182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674622625380875,0.7926562406059725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060219996303721775,0.08846273252553599,0.0,0.0,0.07248222101020903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896720484481973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894818933966794,0.0602097676978681,0.0,0.0,0.06820230110683008,0.0,0.13689376733996422,0.0,0.0,0.0731210266739881,0.0,0.05522297606056446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293498286172163,0.0,0.04884780803849938
mentalhealth,suprisedpikachumeme,2020/03/17,"*Possible trigger warning* I keep having thoughts of starving myself For a while, I’ve been having thoughts of starving myself, I’ve never done it before, but I’ve been having thoughts of doing it, I’m not sure what could be causing these thoughts, I’ve been having these thoughts since 2018, long time, I know.",3.623850574712641,6.381251499999998,3.235172413793105,89.08540229885055,77.10344827586206,4.55632183908046,28.63218390804597,5.46131890053228,1.1104045977011492,249,11,43,1,6,74,34,58,0.11699999999999999,0.883,0.0,-0.642,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,11,0,0,2,2,14,19,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,9,0,4,1,4,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,29,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706153053630725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205974250854466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16008722587542548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20518661159018375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17821838908465806,0.0,0.0,0.11019250988681983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774409464618186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464210519997496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22603968270912736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586011734562167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18897394211986412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7958943514777288,0.11691629600616214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,urmumniceguy12,2020/03/18,"Sad shit happens-i don’t cry, dumb shit happens-I cry I don’t get it, I mess up notes on the piano a few times and start Punching myself and crying like a lil fuckin baby who can’t get the shit out of his diaper but when something sad happens I’m just like “fuck man that’s not good” instead of showing emotions. Just curious if this is linked to any kind of disability like autism or smthng else",1.5760542168674725,3.591665566265064,3.0996234939759044,91.31883283132534,80.08433734939759,5.595783132530121,22.423192771084338,6.6274283507984215,0.4821096385542165,314,10,67,3,8,103,61,83,0.316,0.57,0.114,-0.9502,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,14,6,0,4,0,4,5,3,0,0,10,10,6,0,1,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,9,0,0,0,0,4,5,7,10,1,6,0,2,0,2,3,3,6,2,6,34,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240206665342047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5931447473257409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503618592219646,0.20246898111783795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16640151780776075,0.18807883270124492,0.0,0.0,0.1509703958628017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15916806646620268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874360135695068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638078744727879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5542836473061177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13856814592578154,0.0,0.0,0.12740065297459924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495592691891698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayYoSin,2020/03/18,"I just want to be myself [Crossposting this to several different subreddits because I’m not entirely sure where this fits]

Even after 22 years of being alive, I really don’t know anything about myself. It’s becoming a major problem in my daily life and mental health.

For some context, I was homeschooled from 6th to 12th grade. I had friends from church during that time but did not have the typical “high school experience” that so many seem to have learned so much from. I am now a senior in college, soon to be a fifth year. Take one look at my post history and you’ll see that I’ve been addicted to porn for all of those 4 years. I like to think I’m a recovering addict, as I’ve put much more effort for the past year or so into purging my life of this addiction, with varying levels of success. I recently had a 42 day clean streak, but soon fell into another season of binging. I believe my addiction may be a cause, at least in part, of some of the issues I’m about to explain.

As with many mental health issues, mine are fairly difficult to put into words, but they can probably be summarized by this: I don’t know my personality. I really have no idea how to talk or act around other people— you might say I don’t know what my “default” is. A common tip I’ve heard for dealing with social anxiety is “Just be yourself!”, which is problematic if you have no idea who “yourself” is. I’ve spent so many years trying to win friends to compensate for my lack of friends in high school— basically being a people pleaser. I’ll usually adopt the personalities of people I’m around, even when I’m aware that I’m doing it. It’s just subconscious. I can’t turn it off without overthinking literally everything I say or do. That gets real old real quick. I’ve spent so long trying to be funny to get people to like me that I can’t have a genuine conversation now without it feeling forced, especially around people that I want to like me (e.g. I can talk to my mom naturally but not my brother). Honestly I think being in quarantine with just my family for weeks on end is making me realize how messed up I am.

I just want to be myself. I want to build genuine relationships with people. I want to be able to speak naturally without overthinking every word that comes out of my mouth. I’m just so crippled by insecurity that I really don’t know where to go from here.

Thanks for reading. Any advice is very appreciated.",4.539575577066274,5.794781637130804,5.953809878381732,77.20749069247954,70.18143459915612,9.289550757011666,28.709108960039714,9.627879704456738,2.663327575080665,1912,70,363,44,34,647,230,474,0.07,0.797,0.133,0.9840000000000001,1,1,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,3,1,3,30,15,0,1,13,0,43,10,1,4,2,69,77,21,0,8,20,2,1,3,3,3,8,4,1,2,23,15,0,0,13,1,2,6,14,4,0,1,8,7,44,11,75,55,10,54,1,0,2,1,23,23,0,9,27,247,67,7,0.07323928557108192,0.0,0.0,0.3193665271882241,0.0,0.07156858222042389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0498052256704522,0.07679777677222649,0.05602785299713763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06026969163344125,0.1955954753655175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04464598870165984,0.0808870367948282,0.0,0.0825155947025825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523692097121353,0.0,0.06308915946994965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04723328025842486,0.07550648749754788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651946523445938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486826844431945,0.0,0.0,0.09674771476709317,0.0,0.061707256878121675,0.0,0.06582274737489299,0.07164207480558278,0.06904348030692145,0.0,0.03703198337904611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16975347106294456,0.0,0.07652900774170845,0.0,0.041623573790044166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569987147733216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547626526433103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653564773865449,0.0,0.15288557194488592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610015839083135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346214668370234,0.1073430464124632,0.0,0.0,0.06481446302449663,0.06150255409429184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048887791831070025,0.22275942062597326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761594758368698,0.07769530808259081,0.0,0.08577696608791897,0.0,0.0,0.10767860382989844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685231003293055,0.0,0.0496288353505737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931100915720457,0.06991518527549857,0.2538744946446418,0.1278994383794652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701429903686515,0.0,0.07896433712651536,0.07008010510995674,0.0,0.14725142165069702,0.0,0.0,0.07325910516189615,0.16672468220011158,0.1407568852077707,0.0,0.07231495884819722,0.07863158366586499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164856389915996,0.0,0.14824413411355866,0.058362228277883836,0.06667429490871772,0.0,0.08273954596150418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465822839900206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902715989940268,0.0,0.05506682800790273,0.11773392697441158,0.0,0.06742889414550933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385755384242514,0.0,0.0,0.0427064163912307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099449334699594,0.07966331151105834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08066272588821875,0.06043008083462562,0.21599214097140806,0.0,0.05874813715951808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118001732215677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358184933173837
mentalhealth,ForgottenCompanion,2020/03/18,"Abandonment issues I’m new to this sub, and I probably won’t lurk in it for long because of triggers, but I really need to vent a bit about my abandonment issues and I can’t do it to my friend because it’s about her, so I came here in hope of acceptance.

Obligatory long post and trigger warning!


So, I have had abandonment issues for the last couple of years, which stem from my best friend avoiding me and abruptly cutting ties with me around the same time my depression was at its worst, making me believe that everything bad around me was my fault which led me tomy most serious (and hopefully last) suicide attempt. After this I developed issues trusting people, and even worse issues with handling the few relationships I have/had.

Go forward two years two years and the situation is this: I only really have 1 friend, and she lives a couple hours away as she’s started uni (I’m still in my hometown as the suicide attempt ended up with me having to take a year off school). We rarely see each other, but this weekend she was visiting for a concert. I hadn’t seen her since bafore christmas, and she still hadn’t gotten the moving in gift that I intended to give her in september of last year as most of our few plans were cancelled by her. We talk about meeting up and she mentions that she might not have time as she has some big school stuff coming up and as she’s coming up with 2 uni friends. 

She agrees to text me regardles as soon as she knows so that I can at least give her the moving in gift 6 months late if we won’t have time to meet up (I’d just go to her place, give her the gift and then leave). She never texts back. I think fair enough, she was probably busy, so I text her the day before she’s going back asking about the concert (still nothing despite me texting her on saturday). I start to get worried that she doesn’t care about our friendship anymore, but I let it slide. Today I find pictures a common friend of ours posted about the two of them going out for coffee this last weekend, and it’s safe to say that my brain went on overdrive.

Here we have my only real friend, ignoring me and not at least telling me that she won’t have time to meet up (I would’ve been okay with a “I only have time to meet one person and ____ and I discussed this some time ago), not even answering my text to her 4 days after I sent it. I get flashbacks from my old best friend cutting me out of his life suddently, and now I cannot help but believe that she’s doing the samd thing.

I’m terrified of my only friend leaving me. My anxiety is so bad that I’ve had severe nightmares these last couple of nights, and I’m crying in the midst of an anxiety spike while writing this because I really don’t want to lose my closest (and only) friend again. I wish I could get my shit together.",7.060198271479415,5.7632316975089,7.040348246059987,80.33616548042707,64.76512455516014,10.092628368073207,32.70488052872395,8.942964678507748,2.499661718352822,2202,71,450,29,28,705,248,562,0.156,0.6890000000000001,0.155,0.4816,0,2,0,0,0,2,51.0,7,0,1,6,26,33,3,1,20,1,34,3,2,5,1,76,69,38,2,7,9,0,0,0,9,4,1,3,0,1,29,36,0,6,5,4,0,15,13,15,0,4,15,5,86,18,76,48,15,93,0,5,2,0,63,28,1,8,50,311,115,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521282977229178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997342226606829,0.0,0.058320116056553274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047002717219543,0.0549760165042493,0.0,0.055250519227164716,0.09043693533525532,0.09820172312384899,0.10754344970560734,0.0,0.0500398885118577,0.1325092797343224,0.12342731187531447,0.0,0.0642013239581613,0.0,0.0,0.06564735595793274,0.0,0.06725881965370498,0.059957012178844374,0.0,0.0,0.10131295921139608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04695210032846616,0.1952043855179644,0.06459603473666034,0.07585048582746726,0.0,0.05064983923387605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05208498805681167,0.0607626988511735,0.0,0.07768210388555773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05285137237524117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053747955669579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4089028915811945,0.0,0.0921717015842957,0.16923728219586326,0.13368405821389667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0394166693875414,0.0,0.0,0.11681598604955122,0.05791242757705525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30689285299959057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0323184423451595,0.23967519656043335,0.06633614537423474,0.12453490707214468,0.0,0.06013349629944511,0.041536677358501584,0.0,0.0,0.05192710098816964,0.10408357162908652,0.0,0.06578928454379407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039253707779032906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062384264149514576,0.0,0.0,0.0469386824901336,0.12500372687547334,0.0,0.04360417729474445,0.045355096877027115,0.05679555738366236,0.0,0.055185793418461485,0.0,0.0564262968314002,0.0,0.06170739170630825,0.0,0.03984871738524826,0.22362446675118414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04076893167834578,0.0513474529244254,0.061440139045355474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126404913600002,0.0,0.12680642338029813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693452198914816,0.11301859693162128,0.0,0.0,0.06313603236750823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04676518474418168,0.0,0.11903036939277582,0.046861062206890035,0.0,0.0,0.06643445811922777,0.06036389245083507,0.04864523591759131,0.06610082236437367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324690095081566,0.0,0.1408885261392008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731922291738589,0.12864924550352086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0442150707565138,0.04726633165495542,0.051399358282431036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039068338364005216,0.037680746597394066,0.0,0.0,0.20574279915571872,0.0,0.055741561526031984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233583210518413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03468551990875945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05451409298631275,0.0,0.0,0.06762442187879435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05972072199388871,0.05992871372407675,0.0417743571222912,0.0,0.0,0.18934686715977608
mentalhealth,thesocialxlab,2020/03/18,"Paid study for people who watch game streams on Twitch \[18+\] Are you a Twitch viewer? Are you interested in mental health?

The Social Interaction Lab at NJIT is conducting a study about what people think when mental health is discussed on Twitch streams. Our goal is to identify how mental health is discussed in different Twitch communities to learn about the viewers' perceptions of these discussions. You will be paid $20 for participating in a 40-50 minute interview over the phone, Skype, or Discord. If you’re interested in participating, please email [socialxlab@gmail.com](mailto:socialxlab@gmail.com) for more details. Thank you!

​

Personal Information will be held for the duration of the study and will be discarded after. Names and other personal information are not being recorded. Privacy is ensured through our consent form. We are accountable to our university standards and respond as such. Thank you /r/mentalhealth for allowing us to post this!",8.932377171215883,12.179103825806447,7.4832258064516175,62.64791563275438,62.354838709677416,10.962779156327544,36.43920595533498,10.891193690592663,4.973764267990076,803,38,110,24,13,242,98,155,0.032,0.868,0.1,0.875,1,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,5,5,0,1,5,4,0,0,8,0,16,7,0,2,0,17,22,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,5,4,0,1,5,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,10,4,24,12,2,11,0,0,3,0,26,8,0,2,2,74,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17597740612283358,0.19735292346966304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696898988578059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5179210681009251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4910306509302672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22519727333078884,0.2836303507360099,0.0,0.17828372993610705,0.0,0.0,0.1555494004665416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655624119576891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29906121775907146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10406945977577126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19536615935612844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19735292346966304,0.0
mentalhealth,PerOlafPtatoBitch366,2020/03/18,Please help me PLEASE I dont know what to do. I want to tell my therapist that I kind of tried to commit suicide but I’m afraid what will happen and what my mom will do. My mom have gone through a lot my little brother has cancer and when she found out I self harm she lost it and I’m afraid if she finds out she will break.,-0.37958333333333627,1.572863541666667,1.0311111111111124,103.70000000000002,87.19444444444444,4.155555555555557,14.555555555555555,5.148860815047168,-1.3329777777777774,253,4,65,1,8,80,46,72,0.203,0.693,0.10400000000000001,-0.9167,0,0,0,0,0,2,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,2,1,0,8,1,0,0,1,13,16,6,1,2,2,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,3,0,13,1,7,10,1,6,0,1,0,0,10,3,0,2,1,41,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23697205088214734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18480335984574428,0.0,0.0,0.2216973323600284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17880113790465518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552762790696118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21055588130585495,0.11112156092193252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20265337803671227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207206745155776,0.17189969599095625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4736187126340463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4439006885617671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109343871257269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211694613729007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767281003747029,0.0,0.0,0.2347649864605664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13727772157520945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192603613901397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The410Shark,2020/03/18,"How to get Help? Hey everyone. Sorry if this doesn’t belong here. I believe I have been depressed for a very long time and I always have been ok with that. Recently I have been feeling especially lost and am becoming more isolated from people and things I enjoy. I want to get better but I have no clue what to do. I have good health insurance but really don’t know where to begin. If anyone can point me in a direction of what to do or who I need to talk to to get help it would be much appreciated. Thank you. 

USA",0.8935534591194987,3.204220462264153,3.217264150943397,87.72954402515724,84.94339622641509,6.929559748427672,19.21069182389937,8.07648339933343,0.9377823899371074,403,11,86,9,12,138,73,106,0.086,0.6920000000000001,0.222,0.9361,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,2,3,7,0,0,2,1,16,1,0,1,0,15,26,9,0,5,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,1,11,5,13,20,2,7,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,3,4,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17114201851140368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381605496316016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271571109658395,0.0,0.2317306313224375,0.0,0.181907013699136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17715165678326344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965358036811936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039978554172596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322377521650052,0.0,0.0,0.17251440565912984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21862794326522225,0.0,0.0,0.2757255854115665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303620490605945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820200955907468,0.0,0.0,0.2245237304493454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119827309830966,0.15250891942157907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259243269763747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944338337892096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317637067665535,0.0,0.2030839276908752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302416272210206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16531758223513285,0.0,0.18936226862367456,0.0,0.0,0.13664447851442896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993350914489688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697073242112313,0.12131523833378573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14610898449446633,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Limelivin,2020/03/18,"Post college workplace is a cycle of hatred. Life is a joke. All people care about is themselves. They never think about how their actions affect the lives of others. They go to work and pride themselves in making their bosses happy, instead of prioritizing their own sanity. Everyday is a cycle of hatred and it affect their mental health to the point of no recovery. The employees complain about poor working conditions and the bosses complain about the decline of results. It’s seems that life is a continuous of bullshit that eventually leads to mental breakdown.",6.899285714285713,9.503205408163268,6.767091836734696,68.36451530612247,66.34693877551021,8.16530612244898,32.65816326530612,8.841846274778883,3.330955102040817,462,20,62,8,8,146,60,98,0.19399999999999998,0.7070000000000001,0.099,-0.9001,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,6,4,6,6,0,0,9,0,5,3,0,8,2,15,10,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,1,1,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,6,4,15,10,2,9,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,1,3,49,11,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24616507425398104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721641940160334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257018312498015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566403713094848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34107367577689296,0.0,0.0,0.21319672555426408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16116366608373506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4866312507469773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18621409547938345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673847099638597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282396776621329,0.0,0.231233628161204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21979871453731534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547055706582699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3515436808037419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Amnaaay,2020/03/18,Anxious and it’s killing me I’ve been overthinking everything lately. Even when things are going smoothly I need to think of every possible way things could go wrong and try to come up with solutions. And usually there are no solutions to these non-existent issues. But this thinking is affecting the way I deal with actual problems. I’m always on edge and can’t work properly. I make too many stupid mistakes at work. Every morning After coming into work I’d have to go straight to the toilets to gather myself/catch my breath before starting work. Sometimes even cry for no apparent reason. I get flustered when faced with actual problems. Which aren’t even big compared to what other people in the world go through. I’m a mess.,4.268489819004525,6.9224114485294175,4.715,79.89153846153849,74.22058823529412,7.714027149321268,28.84389140271493,8.617729084823388,2.6334339366515835,591,25,97,12,13,187,97,136,0.226,0.737,0.037000000000000005,-0.9788,2,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,4,7,7,2,0,4,0,8,2,2,3,0,21,22,7,1,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,10,0,0,3,0,0,6,4,7,0,0,1,1,6,0,19,20,0,22,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,6,59,14,4,0.0,0.0,0.2602794298734017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096585565538183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065836866015153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347918210761153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297549433086101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647677486823913,0.0,0.1464892390312591,0.0,0.13748787351252084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642482390196378,0.0,0.22472239961471785,0.0,0.11985499346158568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967487751812347,0.0,0.3031652954891072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391927559743162,0.0,0.0,0.1475426189069716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15043541752607936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901855671401597,0.13520568479956044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888444045414574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924547428031034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15034289135497206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552142192395006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371158615724024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318960368528119,0.0,0.0943925987230502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17719636137079575,0.17090287097914647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905424024030132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468767389617312,0.0,0.0,0.21170925804395155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3883494567667951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458077680655511,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustWantToListen_,2020/03/18,"Why can’t I trust anyone It runs my body everyday, people I talk to on a basis I can’t trust with basic things. I feel like lovers are talking to others when I have no proof or friends are talking behind my back when they are always friendly. These things were often true when I was younger but I should have changed, adapted. Why can’t I trust anyone because all it does it hurt me and make me cry, thinking I should distance myself from these people. I know it’s on me but why can’t I stop it?",2.8414805825242726,4.16466833009709,3.52251213592233,92.73969053398059,74.4368932038835,5.538349514563106,23.55461165048544,5.148860815047168,0.18391359223300974,390,11,84,1,8,123,62,103,0.124,0.6990000000000001,0.177,0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,5,9,0,0,1,0,13,2,1,1,3,16,17,7,0,2,3,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,2,1,18,8,7,13,1,9,0,1,0,1,7,2,0,2,7,60,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905702048510155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505146642208367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13774592958643184,0.0,0.10920075516871036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989817393801078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18950406558108615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19677448864037408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567647174812065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057746659862012,0.127976097675628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768028778047003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917707462328692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844946353205457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751769249029318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195758889372536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24838322402065124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14976724261231278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43195259333921626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23802242149836614,0.11478428472454985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4849320707402388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NsfWise,2020/03/18,"No point left worth living First my situation: I'm 20 going to university and have 3 semester left to finish my bachelor. After that I just have to take up my fathers business to earn multiple hundred grand a year without much effort. So my life is smooth sailing and everything seems fine. I'm complimented quiet a bit on my looks and my family situation is stable. I might be arrogant enough to say that I'm quite rationally acting/thinking. So I always search for a reason behind my actions. ATM I'm mostly on autopilot and just act out the predefined life with some friends to be socially accepted and the university as it's the easiest way to get lots of money to open up future possibilities. But I just see no point in this life. What's the difference between dying now or dying in 60 years? The sole reason I'm still here is my brother. I could never let him behind with such a big mental scar. I find no permanent happiness in relationships, hobbies, friends or stuff like that. The only thing that might be fun in my life is working. (brings me unfound happiness but only for some limited time). I always try to find rational solutions to my questions but all I'm finding is the absolute pointless nature of life. There's no point in having children, continuing or race, making social contacts, building a family or to summarize the whole living. I can't find any starting point to finding a reason to live. Suicide is not an immediate thought I have but I can't really stand living my remaining life on autopilot. If anyone found a way to get some reason to remain here the rest of our remaining miserable life I'd be glad if you could share that with me... :)",5.953108006609586,7.0013039022082015,7.196827399729612,70.35118822292327,66.76025236593061,10.580681988883883,33.07631065044314,10.608840637214634,3.8369364278203375,1335,57,227,36,21,454,174,317,0.07,0.8140000000000001,0.11599999999999999,0.8248,0,0,0,0,0,4,32.0,1,1,0,6,11,13,0,1,17,0,21,7,0,5,2,52,39,18,3,4,15,2,1,1,2,2,7,2,0,1,10,10,0,1,14,0,3,4,9,1,0,1,2,5,26,12,40,28,11,38,0,1,2,0,15,19,0,15,13,157,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12982119145634288,0.0,0.0,0.05304949671604792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05454642807261351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516675032709503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456932534952407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16192419366844185,0.08150387966372484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060521626673581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011038648455008,0.0,0.14708183057102464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35649877906613703,0.06635529321523882,0.0,0.08553397338072233,0.1205407141448343,0.0,0.08151404376197274,0.0,0.044334898825589004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660862589275517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951625565491246,0.07977054287801964,0.38570554753976205,0.03811176110868023,0.0,0.27553714923083666,0.0,0.06550877940081969,0.0,0.0,0.0663213393888166,0.0,0.0,0.05207230199813763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861576391995903,0.1655126318773012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057346349337512786,0.0,0.06016614570603325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866028893260425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.294978780564725,0.08794458965516645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738908907366498,0.08297327128592752,0.0,0.0,0.049975223945364286,0.3208292210565031,0.0,0.08375357973600522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620367083972245,0.0,0.0,0.06216389536822527,0.07101740311766602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17537308851733224,0.0,0.15904280681247865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05521590203811725,0.0,0.06229891218167213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930282269810158,0.08533031327132548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058653835460914364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05182639880308466,0.049985678483673225,0.0,0.0619312514605183,0.04548827689470438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05296369089327492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12384146438234192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709541462896002,0.0,0.07519888688067139,0.0,0.05679223226045984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047180566633364
mentalhealth,99shpoons,2020/03/18,"just rambling about my life i just need to vent a little bit because ive been crying about these issues a lot for the past 10 years and i seeked out therapy again but the process of getting there will take a long time and with corona and all i wont get it until a long ass time and im losing it

sorry about my english by the way

oh and i dont even know if these kinds of posts are allowed here im so sorry if im breaking any rules

to summarize my life in short

1) i spent my early years with my physically abusive mother (who later turned narcomaniac, but its fine because i havent seen her in years. the only issue is that she still stalks me and wont leave me alone despite me having told her numerous times to just give it up)

2)  then i spent some (genuinely good) time with my dad and his gf (who later turned out to be a gold digger and was with us only for the money, i lost about 10 family members when they separated)

3) moved to another country only for my dad to fall into depression and become an alcoholic 

4) i started blaming myself for my mothers abuse, and truly got myself believing that i deserved all she had done to me (she tried to kill me and herself at the same time on multiple occasions) and ended up developing severe depression  
since i was so young when i started having those thoughts, my self identity formed around being somebody who deserves to die and to have pain in her life (which led to years of self harm and multiple suicide attempts)

5) my brother developed a personality disorder and pretty much abandoned me to take care of my dad on my own

for the past three years i have been lying to myself about how im really feeling, ended up missing an entire year of school, and now for the past 6 months i have been feeling extremely suicidal and i have wanted on multiple occasions to hurt myself (i did relapse once, but i was drunk during that episode so i dont really think about it)

a lot of my energy goes into not doing anything to myself

tmi maybe but last week i got my nipples pierced because i have been aching to feel some kind of pain and honestly i dont know how long ill be able to lie to myself about being ok

the thought that no adult in my life wants to take responsibility for me is debilitating for me

i just cant understand whats so unlovable about me like im a genuinely good person at the core

and even though i have reached a state in my life where i have found friends that i love and love me back, and im in an extremely healthy relationship, since im only 19 years old theres no one that really understands me and im glad no one does but i just wish i could get help sooner

i need to get myself to believe that i deserve to live because most of the time i really cant understand what im still fighting for",6.29223404255319,5.498441911347518,7.119659574468084,77.50300000000003,66.05673758865248,10.285957446808512,32.275177304964544,9.642632912329526,2.7740692198581565,2194,76,445,39,30,735,264,564,0.205,0.687,0.109,-0.9971,1,1,1,0,3,4,27.0,1,0,1,3,34,26,2,0,23,1,38,13,1,4,2,75,78,40,4,8,13,6,3,1,2,3,9,0,0,5,21,31,2,1,12,1,3,3,12,13,0,3,20,4,75,13,72,50,12,69,0,7,1,3,33,22,1,7,41,301,96,1,0.05421861663719387,0.12848038964254438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794321225093271,0.0,0.05615413535689698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036870518548878364,0.05685294695236923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044617301766877,0.04826606382135427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041690769478526866,0.0,0.1322046618521118,0.05988020233541171,0.0,0.12217162854291608,0.0,0.0,0.05919268686922208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527949314299642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04328915357581035,0.0,0.05955660446585648,0.0,0.0,0.09339683012459572,0.0,0.05627036405378764,0.0,0.06213923194688108,0.0,0.04744707679201826,0.05548446912147485,0.1906314446988149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604320280507568,0.0,0.0,0.07162176988182922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051112486432236495,0.0,0.08224368497675022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05944791463288614,0.04188916871880227,0.0,0.11330795760822815,0.05201143753227571,0.0,0.09095200650087044,0.08672716137930793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036341595852522834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580421504862177,0.0,0.5270886893654697,0.11318029866078935,0.0,0.0,0.05998486615268739,0.11292069168423954,0.05959426752895959,0.04419540902167805,0.0,0.05740968646856118,0.0,0.0,0.19148106182918864,0.026488477400821976,0.05434129761213394,0.047876031821746684,0.14394530869065306,0.0,0.060656763431993325,0.05918602482327779,0.09218945797772646,0.097868836702384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054469887889450064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043276782524032685,0.05762580898836006,0.03985692170232413,0.08040483446976478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05689331760772221,0.05774105721438861,0.07347987564438009,0.1649428045480912,0.11538486159735553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552734136336541,0.0,0.09468320947612686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05192644732850741,0.05515982506455669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893533665924473,0.0,0.0,0.05821050351750435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487213463063451,0.0,0.0,0.11312368358701315,0.061251604084373475,0.0,0.08970039992402311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138660476362954,0.07675243183498831,0.0,0.08659811456701061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861273312703315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122296956363224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06200371332392517,0.0,0.0,0.03474110028932698,0.05326951556309035,0.08608705066336778,0.18969186825427725,0.0,0.0,0.05180821168460988,0.0,0.036810881693187004,0.1179485712671356,0.0,0.1693304761245991,0.06521832005235463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639590896970707,0.0430362142177318,0.043490903849816735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062348733362449574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444050804102597
mentalhealth,youngthugweekndfan65,2020/03/18,"How to stop liking a girl? Title, not sure if this is the right place to post this though.",0.4247368421052649,2.437888578947369,1.157105263157895,103.68723684210528,84.26315789473685,3.8,9.5,3.1291,-2.212389473684211,69,0,17,0,2,21,17,19,0.19,0.6859999999999999,0.124,-0.1184,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,1,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,11,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20776452898761014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.444314685976028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40728931708519067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36317666252789294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3555432019939454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4008101831415897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4178237821257402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hello_pillow,2020/03/18,"I need help I think I have schizophrenia I just blowed up when I was talking to my friend, I was talking via the personalitys, one sad, on ABSOLUTELY neutral, One really aggressive and not loyal, I talked like neutral one had some time to talk to my friend about the personalitys and how much aggressive personality is a prick.... Now I'm neutral idk I'm breathing very heavily and my heart really hurts, I think These started because I just wanted to change how i live and generally change my lifestyle, because genes already gave me tall persons height, but no brain... I'm ok with height but I want to change brain and power of it but no results, I just wanted to be loyal, intellectual, and plus no good communication with parents or anyone, relationships too. Pls somebody help....",4.589790209790209,7.125857069930074,5.533566433566435,74.98188811188814,72.7062937062937,8.036363636363637,29.88111888111888,8.841846274778883,2.7025216783216783,623,27,108,13,13,204,86,143,0.155,0.713,0.132,-0.0906,3,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,9,12,3,0,3,1,6,5,5,3,0,28,17,14,0,4,8,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,9,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,3,4,0,17,7,13,12,2,9,0,2,0,0,15,5,1,2,5,68,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371004837634162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687058071461115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15146950451758687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773829323977674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39428418155106426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19197300735395287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10420551867511264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14722344579052668,0.16654915008421378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330000871696519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06069674837663393,0.0,0.10970503939445392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132973220869604,0.0921214143838402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525620549217501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13795236254471985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4339217278593942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15918097220581304,0.0,0.0,0.13338585798704633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793678420788485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3994334116529685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921427197799215,0.0,0.0,0.07244457921771784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025099305465506,0.2198375947585341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,floorboarddiary,2020/03/18,"I just got home from a week long stay at a psychiatric hospital. I got sent to a different psych hospital than usual. Honestly, I had a really good time while I was there. I had a routine, I got along very well with everyone and made quite a few friends, I got on medication I needed, and I was in a good mood essentially the whole time. 

Right when I got home, it was like reality slapped me in the face and I just feel shitty again. Almost immediately I got so stressed, my family tore apart my room and left it a mess, some of my stuff (purse, hoodies, sketch book) are gone, almost all of my friends from outside are mad and thinking I was ignoring them. 

I’m trying to stay positive and use some coping skills. It’s just hard because I didn’t expect stress and anxiety immediately, and I didn’t get to practice my coping skills while not in a situation where I need them...

I’m just having doubts that I can do this. In the hospital, I felt really hopeful. Now, I’m just scared again. Any tips on how to gain and somewhat maintain a better mindset? What coping skills work for you?",4.345249221183799,5.397441780373836,5.523532710280378,80.87209034267914,70.44859813084112,9.258068535825547,28.285358255451712,9.558583805096642,2.4030969470404986,847,30,173,19,15,282,124,214,0.11900000000000001,0.7240000000000001,0.158,0.8884,1,0,0,0,1,0,30.0,0,1,2,7,14,17,1,4,13,0,13,2,1,3,1,35,33,14,0,4,6,0,3,1,2,0,1,0,3,0,7,11,0,1,3,1,0,2,3,7,1,0,18,3,27,9,19,15,6,27,0,0,0,0,6,12,0,7,12,111,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299048003432893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806575194906604,0.0,0.08781922811180329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699790560646392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152842955104212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993820953234627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969324982326553,0.0,0.0,0.1082201944632092,0.0,0.05804470494279164,0.0,0.11022291839835753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738342628512205,0.0,0.05997658332885258,0.0,0.0,0.19257219746866813,0.5508808663899007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028353730805874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303010753443395,0.11401911217352495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247270453490244,0.0,0.0,0.056083911690575236,0.0,0.0,0.1015915443624638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862349586284238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156456860227758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17024072647368071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210051396491987,0.0,0.0,0.14708352303510702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803582915978327,0.0,0.0,0.11493161060101766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12903639878070822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24471620223771776,0.0,0.0,0.2629986641081584,0.0,0.13141485662751792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355714604417278,0.0,0.0,0.13387785975274644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779394831531105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991475661257042,0.1264324429004845,0.09471937205771247,0.0,0.0,0.09208305837846048,0.0,0.10321609836954852,0.0,0.0,0.12816651344910204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357342841553525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prussner,2020/03/18,"Losing it. Hey people, 

the whole C.19 Pandemic hits me really hard, especially the feeling that everything in the cities is shutting down, everybody seems stressed out. And I am just a student, living from a small part-time job that wont give me money for the next 2(?) months, plus a stupid comment of a coworker of how *""You wouldnt even want to work even if you could, sorry.""* 

My anxiety got a bit better the last 2 days after crying (crying can help sometimes!) but now I´m all back in the downward spiral of thinking I will never find an alternative job, they will fire me from my old position, I will not have any money left in 2 months, that my life will go to hell and why I just wont end it right now. I even had the idea of going to the clinic, but I dont know, am I *""ill enough""*?

So my fear is not so much centered around the idea of dying by Covid-19. (I´m not in a riskgroup fortunately.) But the whole situation around it is grinding my gears...

​

Greetings, P.",3.950117820324003,5.098499298969075,4.7771723122238585,85.4937113402062,71.4742268041237,7.810898379970546,26.228276877761417,8.192908349453996,1.4972751104565538,760,24,157,11,14,246,123,194,0.135,0.8190000000000001,0.046,-0.948,2,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,2,1,3,13,6,2,2,17,0,17,3,0,1,2,28,27,10,1,4,9,0,3,0,0,7,3,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,7,0,2,2,8,5,0,0,2,3,18,1,22,16,6,28,1,1,0,0,7,14,1,2,12,106,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194377901543405,0.14797064632351334,0.08281156333527841,0.0,0.09315797759279597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21681215010784066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09363789642911187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770059551316558,0.13294738264007971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722788352763397,0.0,0.26752949059939035,0.07853516828805472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12638381558322745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272006088408884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785700995053496,0.12582671627886244,0.0,0.2412948461068336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944403001413992,0.0,0.0,0.13703137166364915,0.061573387044087075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113006646589132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168182228750877,0.13841572528803206,0.0,0.097395047589722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109086991393182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816235975270231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749395914918675,0.0,0.0,0.24168692552208826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669246684631195,0.09926334256664708,0.0,0.0,0.1323095129126781,0.0,0.08601368629059654,0.0,0.0,0.10753005917702207,0.0,0.0,0.13623571363669695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944001960365717,0.0,0.08951905548943402,0.0,0.09392082666577924,0.0,0.12950970001018208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778297566333865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13187107516517474,0.0,0.0844238471343751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801254826408784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039956712501641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11085990518749872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13688084266653505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204391523386286,0.1363177804932651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394935037844527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802886805437624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182638617211487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988351077829113,0.2719161496805157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865406516413186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14797064632351334,0.0
mentalhealth,approachpattern,2020/03/18,"What if therapy is a big waste of time I've been seeing a therapist once a week for a few months. There are days when I feel really bad and need someone to talk to, and there are days when I'm feeling good and don't have anything to talk about. It seems like I'm wasting time (and money) by going to these sessions when I'm feeling good. Has this ever happened to you? What do you think I should do in these situations?

​

It seems that therapists prefer that clients come in once a week, so my therapist would probably get annoyed if I canceled a lot. Also, it seems that if I don't visit the therapist for 2-3 weeks, then I start risking the therapist giving my weekly timeslot to someone else (and it took a while to get a spot with this therapist).

​

Also, my therapist has a cancellation policy where I'm charged a fee if I cancel with less than 24 hours notice. There have been times when I've been feeling bad 24 hours before the session but I feel better on my own before the session (resulting in me having nothing to talk about). What should I do in these cases?",6.344583333333333,5.9931976250000005,6.780925925925927,78.50666666666667,65.80555555555556,9.792592592592593,32.814814814814824,9.2995712137729,2.782053703703704,861,32,167,14,12,281,111,216,0.073,0.851,0.076,0.1523,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,2,0,1,14,8,1,1,14,0,19,0,0,1,1,30,42,19,0,9,5,0,5,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,15,8,0,0,10,0,2,4,2,4,0,0,4,6,15,4,22,35,4,31,0,0,1,0,7,7,0,8,21,113,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715200762224904,0.0,0.1722761152642307,0.19320204644714944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654216052846543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13275811327479886,0.0,0.0,0.13529703911482918,0.0,0.0,0.07031115959048752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848208405787709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025416567969153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664119260766981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191216859224958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20098757218359295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307078403112837,0.07626350321009487,0.04518159859835789,0.13336140989064893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703014575546049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15658268257873606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038839612537810285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758793217413335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06345602428112193,0.0,0.0,0.0589481337435335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628225318381605,0.09051110968943926,0.0,0.16932949793941698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571428781276305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05092964161360067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335109004954764,0.2171210414023671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936116581110891,0.0,0.0,0.13471993510996982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05627040521614005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19169691159142774,0.0,0.0,0.09091501051442047,0.6461381983953607,0.0,0.050940295810766284,0.0,0.0,0.13907101101139274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832726198633474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25507994723677496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056474414688515565,0.0,0.19320204644714944,0.0
mentalhealth,carnicirthial,2020/03/18,"How are you keeping your head up and sober? Hey all.

I thought I was handling this well, but I literally just ran into the backyard and started scream crying so clearly I'm not. 

Background, I've got MDD and GAD, I'm an abuse survivor, and have flirted with binge drinking before. I live with my folks, fortunately only for 10 more days, and as an adult it's fucking rough. Two weeks ago my boyfriend dumped me (he had too many commitments between work and school and couldn't hold up his end anymore) and now with covid I'm stuck at home in the suburbs that I absolutely hate. 

How do I keep my head above water and sober for the next 10 days until I move into my own space?",4.561111111111114,5.310570148148149,4.7696296296296286,87.58333333333336,69.74074074074073,7.1851851851851825,29.074074074074076,6.937597516519254,1.343074074074074,530,19,111,4,9,166,99,135,0.18,0.748,0.07200000000000001,-0.9585,0,0,1,0,1,0,15.0,0,2,0,1,7,6,3,0,5,0,6,5,2,2,3,27,18,15,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,3,14,2,3,1,1,0,2,2,4,1,1,6,2,15,2,14,11,3,18,0,0,0,1,6,7,1,0,9,65,18,2,0.0,0.21964613308771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16432904268088788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838481066761995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774554961914194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036322882761232,0.2391107760541365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18160277314344014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641925134581636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17138171751459033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482660947996602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830253261329404,0.3805087106857944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18595222571389816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32955024379052233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636947908780106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18794720462572465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19703063083104186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19715476232501547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099057957570774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18761543640113768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121360313847327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717178115463292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18109026860349955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14870143033779284,0.0,0.16667975338478108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349595524135002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kpsophresh,2020/03/18,"Activities for rehab sessions for young children over the phone? Hi everyone! I’m current a mental health rehab specialist who works with children! Because of this Covid-19 crisis, we as a company are recommended to switch to sessions over the phone unless it’s absolutely urgent. I’m struggling finding ways to do this with kids ages 7 and under. Does anyone have any activities or ideas for this age group over the phone? Mainly I’ve been working on listening skills. Any ideas greatly appreciated!",5.545747126436781,8.780501045977013,5.812183908045977,70.60954022988507,73.02298850574712,8.004597701149425,32.6551724137931,8.841846274778883,3.5070137931034484,409,20,59,9,9,130,64,87,0.079,0.825,0.096,-0.44299999999999995,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,3,0,2,0,1,5,0,4,3,0,0,0,9,7,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,3,5,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,1,16,6,1,10,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,1,4,34,6,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32487804716847474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16702266872671026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14561224678785142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20903575890326714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22824944294008365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21832182080987772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633537737883033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539064400823892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5393077607503893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240723639619826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24971760817917515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18960299153435947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3477987663082805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mickeyksf,2020/03/18,"A prescribed ADHD medication similar to Psuedoephrine's focus/mood lifting effects? # 

I take dexedrine and sometimes adderall but find them over stimulating and just not the right fit for me long term.

In the coming months, I would like to suggest to my doctor that I try something less stimulating but still helpful for focus and energy. What of these two would you suggest?  Modafinil and Vyvanse? 

I have to admit that I have had more success when feeling congested, and taking something with pseudoephrine in it than I have had on any ADD medication ie. adderall ie. dexedrine ie. wellbutrin",5.880882352941171,9.026014931372554,5.0468235294117685,77.04670588235294,71.25490196078431,6.825098039215686,35.69019607843137,7.908726449838941,3.1882831372549023,481,26,71,7,10,144,72,102,0.023,0.735,0.242,0.9776,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,1,2,3,2,0,0,3,0,7,4,0,3,0,20,12,8,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,1,10,2,13,8,3,12,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,6,52,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599997515079097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711924825254352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863585515206352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214341047996994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938847244814592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19773168691831816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500876235394206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569324858822653,0.0,0.0,0.19145491156188646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4358814452314772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17268126303361112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18475396864443647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33309962842494295,0.21396670752965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277014287576126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3253229046196671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468812876888529,0.0,0.21133364902978724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3073647732575649,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bigironjoe117,2020/03/18,"I’m having trouble feeling a real sense of joy/positive emotion in my life and I don’t know why. Any advice? It seems that most things I do I expect to have some feeling of gratification by the end of it however, I don’t feel any better/leave with a feeling of joy. Only in some cases do I feel happiness. 

I honestly am having a lot of trouble feeling anything at all and I don’t know why. My life is going in the direction I would like it to. I’m honestly quite content with a majority of things. So why do I feel this way?",1.5172972972972971,3.2520438378378387,4.472333333333335,82.7685,79.0900900900901,7.322882882882882,26.41531531531532,8.238735603445708,1.8578569369369369,410,17,85,8,10,148,60,111,0.049,0.723,0.228,0.9474,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,1,7,0,0,6,0,12,2,0,0,1,22,25,3,0,2,0,0,7,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,10,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,7,11,5,15,24,6,7,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,5,2,59,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551952355095131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160035447879659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306937862528786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404617270201209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786490164209928,0.14066572071114095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5621225183609593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026000147939274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690648492904107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745645781769083,0.0,0.0,0.16816546485419825,0.0,0.0,0.224355879671384,0.07759051458726407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350214920958572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207883421222597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689226272620997,0.0,0.18076979811897825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445820579331841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21102341300204255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606243675364745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4299259708289941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281984063128117,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dayaltan,2020/03/18,Ask me anything I was in a group full of people with eating disorders ask me anything.,6.187058823529411,6.324045352941178,7.004705882352942,75.12117647058824,66.05882352941177,9.15294117647059,34.64705882352941,8.841846274778883,3.0862235294117646,69,3,12,1,1,23,14,17,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,3,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.547218390729945,0.0,0.6216625703080055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810599157792499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3402181068411482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230505231803335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GrapeSalad13433,2020/03/18,"My dad went off his medication and is going crazy. I don’t live with my dad anymore. My parents are divorced and I use go over to his house every other week. He use to be remarried until he got another divorce. After that, he started to go sort of crazy. I still would go over to his house on most weekends. He was starting to get better and I thought I was going to be able to go to his house again like I use to. But then randomly he decided to go off his medicine. He is going crazy now. He threatens me. He yells at me through the phone and sometimes when I see him. So I don’t go to his house anymore. He now wants to go camping. That is ok, but he wants to bring his cats with him and let them outside sometimes when he goes camping. I tried arguing with him, but he just gets really angry and threatens me.

First of all, what should I do about the whole camping with his cats situation? Because I really don’t want him to lose those cats in the wilderness.

Secondly, even if the whole camping problem is solved, what should I do about everything else? He is off his medication and going crazy and not cleaning his house anymore. I just want things to be how they use to be. I don’t think I can do much, but what should I do?",2.1653679653679667,3.922280904761905,3.4399711399711417,90.80149350649351,77.25396825396825,6.486580086580088,25.343434343434343,7.348242739294969,1.0639698412698408,956,35,208,12,22,311,113,252,0.11599999999999999,0.838,0.045,-0.965,1,0,0,0,2,0,28.0,0,0,2,3,13,6,1,0,4,1,26,2,0,5,1,41,55,19,0,10,8,3,0,1,0,4,2,1,1,0,8,12,0,0,3,1,0,13,5,3,0,2,5,2,38,3,35,41,5,35,0,1,1,0,36,8,0,4,15,144,46,0,0.0856940988120206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898577344105223,0.0,0.0,0.254956557990812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05223832725193903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578946654215807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715864235308551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056600144065045335,0.0,0.07220097420530289,0.0,0.07701633042485488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289135667265405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954325947157071,0.0,0.5357212429376873,0.0,0.06853739912488035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4943974225956336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762802198811813,0.0,0.04186580810342663,0.0,0.07566945923968416,0.0,0.0,0.0958697768690916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17265557815334331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629950227162178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515315551788167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199767932226579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979566804357764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828710190080571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632375750670387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950730983504245,0.0,0.12130944840850838,0.0,0.06843541800685976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05693135147426775,0.054909318342689216,0.0,0.06803154233301988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058180667984981435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960487492557037,0.0,0.0,0.20217839894748504,0.0,0.06873863707864555,0.0,0.0,0.07943928813118105,0.0,0.1913488020218484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608746291122509,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImpressiveLibrary0,2020/03/18,"Stress eating I realise there is advice for this on google but writing this and reading others advice or experiences is cathartic for me. I have just admitted to myself in the past day that I have a serious problem with stress eating. Whenever I feel overwhelmed, I binge eat a ton of chocolate and unhealthy snacks and I only stop when I feel physically sick. Even when I feel sick, all I need to do is look at the trigger one more time and I’m ready to eat again. It is like a form of self harm because I know I am destroying my body with this but I continue to do it. I am starting to feel ready to stop but I just wonder what can take it’s place. I wish there was something to do to make me snap out of it. I think I have a lot of work to do on myself. Thanks for reading.",1.9746031746031711,3.637268753086421,3.4907583774250446,90.64555555555555,77.51851851851852,6.3569664902998255,23.917107583774253,7.1686216300943375,0.8124589065255732,606,20,133,7,14,200,91,162,0.218,0.6709999999999999,0.111,-0.9694,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,8,9,1,3,6,0,15,8,1,2,1,31,31,10,0,3,6,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,10,7,5,2,8,2,0,0,0,7,0,1,1,5,22,2,23,30,5,16,0,1,1,0,3,6,0,3,11,98,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649336244431359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263558698947203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057563300233295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742442385306763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5548433264732914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953552639513529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326028401848988,0.0,0.0,0.2741710754227805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449975227003756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622734320588025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383552714881667,0.0,0.0,0.11524752406617195,0.0,0.0,0.09048677142252183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10051537669122236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185837429211297,0.1030988263391829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940652772471184,0.0,0.0,0.14163043779865855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971177905238934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27119162699387955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141773617758108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436004053293546,0.0,0.0,0.09594944941727687,0.0,0.0,0.22666700401371026,0.31056504914770466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192359467026793,0.0,0.0,0.12480463328966393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868608163993513,0.0,0.0,0.07904561841576943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588630861503308,0.0,0.1470080931294838,0.09868866061098652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Benighted88,2020/03/18,"Wife is a Nurse in an ICU for Infectious Disease Hello everyone, I've had a lot of depression and anxiety recently due to the Covid 19 outbreak. My wife is currently a registered nurse in the only ICU at her hospital that takes care of infectious patients and this has been at the core of my anxiety.  She just turned 45 years old, a little overweight and slightly high blood pressure (which has been under control for a while now) so I'm hoping she isn't at particularly high risk.  I am preparing for the worst but am trying to find any shred of light in this bleak situation.",7.381351351351353,7.019805288288289,7.889864864864865,71.4466891891892,63.684684684684676,12.084684684684687,36.51801801801802,11.538034831475384,4.317299099099098,461,20,85,13,6,153,76,111,0.113,0.8490000000000001,0.038,-0.6395,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,6,0,2,10,0,10,2,1,1,0,9,15,6,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,1,6,2,16,12,2,17,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,2,7,56,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14730508550394106,0.0,0.3314185435462023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22085261570836595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24295124683100355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18656949493485167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069841529863674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19798145650080007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4577295951088211,0.0,0.2151467788174617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171043371830747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841576485013132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22730016676327286,0.0,0.0,0.16474486177219466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138803921265508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24348343903629385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628669220737471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470668243545852,0.23561404964430102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949244423215704
mentalhealth,yungwashington,2020/03/18,"Fun at-home smartphone Charades game for adults and children which helps pediatric psychiatry research at Stanford Stuck at home social distancing for the foreseeable future? Spending time with a bored child who is looking for something to do? Want to help pediatric neuropsychiatry research in a fun way? Play the ""Guess What"" mobile Charades game on your smartphone. This game is similar to the “Heads Up” game by Ellen DeGeneres except that this version helps pediatric psychiatry research. Search for ""Guess What Stanford"" on the iPhone App Store ([https://apps.apple.com/…/a…/guess-what-wall-lab/id1426891832](https://apps.apple.com/us/app/guess-what-wall-lab/id1426891832?fbclid=IwAR3OO_K07WHMiGWLzjXMSWxYGRi2Gxro08gLdwNhc6ENysYPJl-MWqzythQ)) or Android Play Store ([https://play.google.com/store/apps/details…](https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=walllab.guesswhat&hl=en_US&fbclid=IwAR2S6G9YIQqW0bapANQJxYJmUlZuGexgktwjSU95Imo0VJLl72oPd57Q7a4)). All children are welcome to participate (with or without autism or any other developmental delay). Also, please share the videos if you would like to help create new machine learning models for adaptive at-home therapies. Thanks for helping children all around the world receive free and personalized psychiatric therapy!",21.606564263322888,27.45252525517241,11.604702194357367,35.34097178683388,34.37931034482759,9.962382445141069,42.1473354231975,10.230975488527342,5.234586206896552,1122,42,94,17,11,271,97,145,0.024,0.713,0.263,0.9890000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,82.0,0,2,0,0,2,10,0,0,8,0,5,4,1,0,2,19,11,7,0,3,6,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,6,8,5,0,1,1,7,4,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,10,23,9,3,14,0,0,1,0,22,8,0,6,5,55,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10778080868153396,0.0,0.2920608076414344,0.0,0.09165271849202557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997975982551776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5938865360502589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831968793902474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4516896134518249,0.0,0.1351919318007546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584504525699904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317841051945834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016809263197635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768173985040058,0.0,0.1479442483602746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738778408199429,0.0,0.1037576212373754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408419739403714,0.3082576056099893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785893268551303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16211967077048678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949473825870783,0.10697940202363317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299198453677866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574143890873854,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PanicSetsIn20,2020/03/18,"Please help me Hello everyone, I am sorry for taking your time but please help me. I don\`t suffer from a mental illness but i was so strssed for the last couple of weeks and I feel like i am about to break. I want to scream ""help me someone, please !"" but i can\`t. I never wanted this so much in my life before, i just want some words of support. I am sorry, I feel so selfish saying it like this but i don\`t know how to say it otherwise. I need some words of support from another human being. I am sorry for taking your time. Thank you for reading my plea.",-0.06039473684210605,2.276558289473691,1.7834868421052654,94.96628289473686,93.2982456140351,3.9026315789473687,15.896929824561406,5.602791699666715,-0.6183491228070177,431,10,90,3,16,141,64,114,0.15,0.584,0.267,0.9331,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,3,0,0,6,8,0,0,2,0,6,2,0,1,1,19,18,9,0,4,5,0,2,2,0,0,2,3,0,1,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,22,5,14,16,3,7,0,1,0,0,10,1,0,2,7,62,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421389580963117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534547177307415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998662473310104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952653511264878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13707916439688214,0.0968389666377361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725746076643566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449628866359212,0.11049364593614737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574497042828176,0.13244852839255095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13660536717212007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996469246957574,0.10051070357895064,0.10454669668887233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4463888946308587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558950944196926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21559409732075568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485347036537047,0.0,0.0,0.4552208755969882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30764748323458,0.0,0.0,0.20383771217561425,0.0,0.0,0.12479883093302364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15808388693022818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23985770811352786,0.0,0.10873230133626717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angoothachap,2020/03/18,"Mental effects of prolonged quarantine?  I'm a downright introvert usually, but two weeks of work from home so far has been driving me nuts!! I'm craving for human interaction! This is SO scary because half of my life decisions are based on how I could live a blissful single life. Makes me wonder, generally, how much mental trauma this isolation will bring in everyone's life!",5.2931372549019615,7.874946352941179,6.0094117647058845,72.16401960784316,70.76470588235293,9.239215686274509,33.392156862745104,9.725611199111238,3.897286274509805,304,15,47,8,6,99,55,68,0.223,0.711,0.067,-0.9259,0,2,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,2,0,6,3,0,4,0,9,11,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,4,0,7,8,2,7,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,30,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446365441062336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18943941863391106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267200139362247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237999435223779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5027688190132941,0.0,0.0,0.20951224234327245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15837842245316974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4782212497553592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17441948969047855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317766377180505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613174945821424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903223061810208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573073335656805,0.17273413711049956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ehsumtub,2020/03/18,"How can you explain or understand a 23 year old having a tantrum? I don't want to say 'tantrum' but just wrote it as that to make title consise. Also want to clarify that I cannot make this individual go to therapy as they do not want to and I'm simply trying to understand in fear of developing resentment towards them. 

Basically, they are a 23 year old student who for quite some time get into moods and everyone is afraid to say anything due to fear of them causing themselves harm or doing something drastic. 

In one of these moods, they all of a sudden started crying and almost hyperventilating. They started packing all their stuff and threatened to leave the house at that moment. It was over something minor, ovee a discussion about the whole household having to evacuate the premises for a week. Everyone was making accomadations and suggesting where and what everyone would do for a week while the home is inaccessible. They refused to compromise and go anywhere. We don't bring up anything if they refuse to do it once, bc we know that it is a trigger. So in this situation they werent being repeatedly asked to do something. It was only a discussion. They were also not dealing with the stress of planning, I was. 

Another time, while they were living with their aunt, they had an incident. This time it was over them not doing their part to clean the house. They were supposed to clean the bathroom and had not done so for several days, despite being asked multiple times. They started throwing their stuff around and started crying and their breathing again was extremely disregular. 

They may have other health concerns. A possible hormone misbalance, which they are being tested for. 

Does this sound like panic attacks or inbility to deal with stress? They also can get angry easily, but have a lot of patience and understanding with children. Maybe it is their parents and/or authority figures, bc they dont like being told what to do? They have once attempted what I think was suicide after one of these moments, but they said it was an accident bc they took the max amount of pills allowed in a day (was 6 a day, 1 every 4 hours)",6.473502968617474,7.91514259287532,6.600661577608143,73.66416454622562,65.81933842239187,9.38456318914334,33.893977947413056,9.633347757342033,3.3938288379983046,1721,76,288,35,27,550,198,393,0.17,0.7879999999999999,0.042,-0.9953,3,0,3,0,0,1,38.0,2,1,28,3,11,15,4,6,23,0,45,3,1,7,2,58,73,28,1,5,12,2,0,2,0,2,2,4,3,1,26,19,0,2,7,0,0,5,8,11,0,2,19,4,35,2,49,48,7,44,0,0,0,0,50,12,0,8,29,219,61,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341530918820618,0.0,0.0,0.1998506702262258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734981772706349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710153600569625,0.0741567869952327,0.15575297670969274,0.09476849296760624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557449980189642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830075246193931,0.1611694476571149,0.17176220972341544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289848163784704,0.08524726552001084,0.09762977904756526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018585520681793,0.23879700648800964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874766932585908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704411973926808,0.0,0.09468533430317234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854654369754275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355908783783332,0.0,0.08203607279288473,0.1922395441272179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0457808142346045,0.0,0.0,0.08820520162302166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139467861772183,0.0,0.07355753531348634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082071187495062,0.0,0.0,0.1668149737532611,0.0,0.08368844596117755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17482368775310667,0.17742865034842684,0.1128957088103314,0.06335522028760031,0.0,0.09773740453200376,0.09249744437879576,0.09020836910654796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939109267443346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886023441808484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923964762353207,0.13249080587208453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410798804752757,0.0,0.0,0.09363537503134718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923907456163024,0.0,0.0,0.23584743765391414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19084520940763008,0.0,0.1907226100740817,0.09111929261499266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526354125114107,0.0,0.0,0.05337680701851258,0.0,0.0,0.1942971707951398,0.0,0.0,0.07959900216266988,0.09255201883852723,0.05655685375405835,0.0,0.0,0.2601621730798288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14740172127863316,0.0,0.13364030284127335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09300414198370427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591756268065339,0.0,0.0,0.10728801417800216
mentalhealth,Warriors-Above-Water,2020/03/18,"Ever since I've been depressed, I've gained a lot of weight and am ALWAYS hungry. Anyone else like this? I'm never full and always always need and want food. I feel bad after eating food I consider ""bad,"" but I can't stop eating. As a result of this, I've gained lots and lots of weight since about 2012.

I did lose a lot of weight in 2015, but regained it all within these last 4 to 5 years.

Honestly, I don't want to be obese anymore, but I don't see if stopping anytime soon because I'm always fucking hungry. 

What's wrong with me?!",3.0642857142857127,3.925265428571429,4.303928571428571,89.14107142857144,73.28571428571428,6.314285714285715,22.035714285714285,5.985473137389443,0.2550857142857144,416,9,89,2,8,137,70,112,0.113,0.723,0.16399999999999998,0.4028,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,3,8,1,0,3,0,7,9,0,1,3,23,15,9,0,4,4,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,5,8,2,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,2,5,7,2,12,12,6,11,0,2,1,1,0,3,1,5,9,51,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4049764277878447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066981049438542,0.08507862754002765,0.12467135195722333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031886100515641,0.07417250726606929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479928565293264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490096710368464,0.10164461227646167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100628294694712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061522997611589164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29426199418043986,0.0,0.0,0.1124874209942852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918210903800914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059444705049126724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612422325707585,0.0,0.4137780405569672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022114780804097,0.09384396525888546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695994930098603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20130314534827876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20345302326377898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14353521211207956,0.0,0.0,0.4445054473937371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330335099615879,0.0,0.07835529872992539
mentalhealth,dschaer,2020/03/18,"[Academic] Women Survivors 18+  Are you an adult female survivor of childhood maltreatment?

We are interested in learning how to best support adult female survivors. We want to learn what helps individuals develop posttraumatic growth and how professionals can assist in this. Survivors and clinicians alike are eager about the results of this project! Take a brief 7-12 minute survey to help us better understand how to better serve you. The survey is anonymous and being used solely for research. Approved by Alliant International University Institutional Review Board.

[https://alliant.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_6RR5n0L20k2HTMx](https://alliant.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_6RR5n0L20k2HTMx)",14.794862637362636,19.720227318681324,10.2418543956044,41.893770604395634,50.53846153846154,10.264285714285714,39.94642857142857,10.411451182825502,5.556460439560438,590,26,54,13,8,165,70,91,0.0,0.6990000000000001,0.301,0.9829,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,3,2,0,4,4,6,0,0,4,0,6,0,0,5,0,14,11,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,6,11,10,1,5,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,0,1,36,8,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30939836484356176,0.5214936589112743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952270488853994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345614470595181,0.0,0.0,0.22167007262261826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069209574462454,0.3546355568995494,0.25463226044015114,0.0,0.0,0.1738941402914133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arianero,2020/03/18,"Freedom from temporal goods and the rat race vs. social validation Renunciation of temporal goods and living a simple life on the one hand and the pursuit of high status and wealth on the other. 

The former is often presented as a path to happiness and liberation, but in my opinion it leads to ostracism (to a certain extent, of course) because we are constantly being judged by an environment that mostly adheres to other values. 

I think that achieving social validation is also important for mental health so is renunciation worth the price? 

I would be happy to read your thoughts on this subject and could you please recommend some interesting publications (psychology, philosophy) on the subject?

Greetings :)

​

​

Translated with [www.DeepL.com/Translator](https://www.DeepL.com/Translator) (free version)",10.4291452991453,12.90698953846154,9.558717948717947,52.258504273504286,57.46153846153847,11.931623931623928,42.9059829059829,11.645159339076185,6.246495726495727,680,37,78,20,9,215,95,130,0.0,0.715,0.285,0.9913,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,1,2,0,2,3,8,0,0,11,0,8,3,1,1,1,20,10,10,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,2,1,4,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,6,9,18,5,4,10,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,4,3,62,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711588464696036,0.0,0.3444543457058637,0.3862943182571532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968972095058143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17177338329127392,0.0,0.12691226238472206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26664704573723785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33842011767130203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16896123823556985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16794419401330093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227428929980536,0.0,0.0,0.14035976706867448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018878532399988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771170706127332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17448434687768266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899755090017356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32406826274370704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10185164807465223,0.0,0.1261921458291261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129167414230242,0.0,0.3862943182571532,0.0
mentalhealth,thequinquangle,2020/03/18,"Hope Hurts **I can't give presentations.**

What? Of course you can! You just have to get out of your own head, you'll do fine :)

**Now, I can't do group projects.**

Why not? You're just being shy, don't worry about it - they won't *kill* you or anything!

**Now, I can't raise my hand.**

You just have to be more confident!

**Now, I can't write around people. Now, I can't hand papers in. Now, I can't sit in a chair in class.**

Don't get lazy now, just stop worrying about other people!

**Now, I can't walk through hallways. Now, I can't attend class.**

Well, just take online courses! They're super chill, no one's gonna talk to you or anything!

**Now, I can't participate in online group sessions. Now I can't pass the class.**

Oh, well... just try again next semester maybe?

**Now, I can't re-register for online classes. Now, I can't go to college.**

Well... now you'll have to get a job, I guess? That'll help you build the confidence you nee-

**Now, I can't pump gas. Now, I can't order food, in person or over the phone. Now, I can't use a credit card, or properly hand someone cash.**

Oh... well---

**Now, I can't drive.**

...

**Now, I can't bike. Now, I can't walk around my neighborhood. Now, I can't walk down my street.**

Maybe---

**Now, I can't see other people walk down the street. Now, I can't walk to my mailbox. Now, I can't stand on my porch.**

Hey---

**Now, I can't stand in front of an open window. Now, I can't open my window.**

You just-

**Now, I can't talk to my doctor. Now, I can't talk to my therapist. Now, I can't talk to my friends. Now, I can't talk to my family. Now, I can't talk.**

... You just have to have hope! Things will get better, I know they will :) There's light at the end of the tunnel!

**I can still use Reddit... for the time being.**

WOW! SEE? I told you things would get better :D

**I don't want to live anymore.**

What?! Suicide is never the answer! You have so much to live for! There's hope, things will get better - I know they will!

**I don't have hope. I can't muster any semblance of it, scrape together any shred of it.** In six years, I, a 19-year-old, have reverted essentially back to being a toddler. Agoraphobic, panicked, and socially anxious. In a house - no, a room, isolated from the outside world. **Six years**.

*Please don't talk to me about hope.*",-2.8483823529411763,-3.3089168343949016,-0.35993271512426617,103.81153592169352,139.84925690021228,2.829030848007993,11.531175846134632,5.148860815047168,-1.3906816660422132,1685,38,409,17,136,554,184,471,0.081,0.7859999999999999,0.133,0.9807,1,0,0,0,0,2,215.0,0,14,3,4,53,19,1,0,17,0,61,7,4,2,1,35,85,6,2,7,13,0,3,0,1,10,2,0,5,1,11,6,1,1,3,1,2,10,40,2,4,3,1,6,66,17,45,70,3,77,0,1,2,0,35,22,0,10,41,260,77,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905144056968556,0.0,0.0,0.09058152591141364,0.07951784741365084,0.0,0.0,0.13196399789062174,0.14275589271600267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06165411620214847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21274030976879812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206848664089901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07101642474145911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755873594392865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695498922642938,0.0,0.061947517594527615,0.0,0.25134707534975875,0.07691676727404508,0.0455686187780475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883282342258841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228867335894907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05374352648532913,0.0,0.0,0.3981883260124104,0.0,0.09251792333910926,0.08583524687744144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079567110961103,0.0,0.08870821897525671,0.0,0.08813058480738374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14160230027685386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16110486035446606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058942142657278075,0.0,0.061840406308545676,0.0,0.08527323229412798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413630304230567,0.0,0.054332611848666064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16676189491491816,0.07001081621244952,0.0,0.08801448376619081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778749584776825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817342683191768,0.06793696499544209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403252188894469,0.06703477196762432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877048243860685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602860125722464,0.4511242503852318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309613443786488,0.15980576062578486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046754092229678426,0.0,0.0,0.07661622808553901,0.0,0.05443752671881568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385010026168787,0.0,0.0,0.047292736470094174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883688156754199,0.0,0.07235073619315659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628550688869724,0.0,0.05695816778266592,0.0,0.0,0.15490149515268706
mentalhealth,LovelyNeverLonely,2020/03/18,"How do you recover from losing all your friends. Let me start by saying I love all my friends, I always have. But I'm in a scenario where I'm connected to all of my friends by one person and if that link breaks I will no longer be invited to things over her. 
Anyway. Over the past year and a half things have been very shaky between us. A fight that lasted multiple months, a boy coming between us, and lies and lies. I find it's all hurting me, I find more often than not I dont have the same smile like I used to when we hung out.

I'm naturally very shy and I'm quite worried I wont make new friends with anywhere near the connection I share with my current friends.
If anyone requests details that may help, feel free to ask, I just dont know where to go from here.",3.470231507622813,4.12671383229814,4.1902315076228165,91.08964991530212,72.16770186335404,7.34522868435912,27.05872388481084,7.348242739294969,1.1219515527950308,601,20,137,6,11,192,102,161,0.13,0.682,0.188,0.9046,1,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,3,2,0,2,8,13,1,1,7,0,12,1,0,3,4,31,25,10,0,2,5,0,1,1,5,3,0,1,0,2,6,10,0,0,5,0,1,2,5,4,0,2,1,2,21,10,20,19,6,18,0,2,0,1,20,7,0,5,9,92,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154688525894666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703213153018436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297324487644644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195392020541612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32527790031986026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701669475517846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536689396023957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5360718768822723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07886693751046654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930154886975086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14855756512286156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626508671043178,0.11311714502081473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419030738084285,0.0,0.06779665593907397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552496075387498,0.0,0.0,0.12524653170255534,0.0,0.09263093176030728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076594137649176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340262028216551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09403503591628468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247292450112286,0.0,0.12116976145750535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760037746537694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103565212535238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822305251570362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843869937258662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33384961608829106,0.1198538622788422,0.0,0.2290017398783193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409290086641716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936417843449543
mentalhealth,throwawaysnatz,2020/03/18,"Is this depression or something else? I'll lay out a timeline and hopefully someone with experience can piece it together and advise, as some of the elements I haven't come across before in anyone I've known with mental health issues.

12 months ago: Had a panic attack (first ever) not predated by anything externally. Began to get occasional heart palps and feeling of losing breath. 

9 months ago: sex and masturbation started becoming less pleasurable. 

6 months ago: Started to get itching skin and muscle twitches, joint pains in fingers mainly.

3 months ago: Loss of pleasure from drugs namely mdma and ketamine (occasional use). Started having intrusive thoughts about physical harm coming to myself and unwanted sexual thoughts. Began to experience very negative thoughts about this all happening.

Been to the doctor and physically everything is fine. They think it's textbook depression and anxiety",8.201890380313197,11.057734463087252,7.863238255033558,60.80255313199106,63.429530201342274,11.141163310961973,38.59116331096197,11.038039088145766,5.541804921700223,741,39,93,23,12,235,110,149,0.19399999999999998,0.73,0.076,-0.9627,0,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,3,3,12,1,1,4,0,7,11,5,1,2,29,24,11,0,2,2,0,3,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,4,14,0,0,6,0,0,2,3,8,0,1,7,3,3,4,19,17,5,21,0,4,0,1,3,4,0,3,15,56,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43061107297752577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290431875262056,0.0,0.0,0.08491646043321621,0.0,0.09993805479073832,0.0,0.0,0.1381600690781296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13412534386647978,0.10333988939319187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20922648531724225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20919905858588764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12430306819454147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408364706801512,0.0,0.10145086899248487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985304034688402,0.0,0.0,0.10914602605962237,0.2375910479445637,0.0,0.0,0.06140572954070561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033001945305254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689894309212024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739251790583752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290892807387347,0.0,0.1439117110357971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062128270786104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675597179647438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358647588993302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238697642033168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.387741731730128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12922496614193413,0.14248835386961858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289909730771307,0.09349351552042023,0.0,0.0,0.2578760402676981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781640410139748,0.0,0.2892388841974647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048886136321086,0.0,0.10020400910942466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sisyfos1,2020/03/18,"Fatigue during treatment Hello everyone 

For the past months i've experienced a lot of fatigue. In the start, i thought that i might just have gotten the flu or something, but even after a lot of rest i continually keep getting exhausted. 

I'm taking SNRI's and have so for the past year, and they haven't had the exhausting effects prior that some might feel when taking medication. I've actually been improving the past 1/2 year, so it's not like my depression have getting worse or anything. 

I therefor thought i might be experiencing fatigue, due to being on a higher dose of medication than i actually need? I'd love to hear your thoughts on it.",6.3862295081967195,7.465292991803281,7.187008196721313,70.6972336065574,65.80327868852459,10.034426229508195,35.74180327868852,10.125756701596842,3.7967672131147534,523,25,91,12,8,174,78,122,0.138,0.737,0.125,0.3403,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,1,1,5,8,0,0,9,0,11,10,0,2,0,21,26,8,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,3,9,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,6,4,9,2,12,15,4,15,0,4,0,1,5,3,0,8,13,60,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.2781620595534551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728356085199852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275409286889867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09413451591215884,0.0,0.0,0.13618599303681006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206346603732512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14892385033271896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063278710844178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266802084965469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962910862132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24233441908112616,0.12863177747583673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871520830463077,0.0,0.4535803392942804,0.0,0.0,0.113759796214395,0.0,0.0,0.10567834587579536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40816046993948224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972049075566627,0.0,0.0,0.10087788989002107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143177938547098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33943992953004004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14524221599263687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835591446475552
mentalhealth,hghregard,2020/03/18,"What do i do in this pandemic? my routine was keeping my fragile mental health intact, now i have nothing i’m a college student living in a small town, most of the residents here attend the same college as i. they cancelled class (online now) until august, so everyone’s going home. but, i have a lease here so i can’t, plus i wouldn’t want to get my mother sick. hopefully my job won’t shut down, but still—all i have to do is work, and it’s spring break next week so i won’t have online school. i can go to the apartment complex gym, and go to work, and maybe do some reading, and i have a lot of weed and healthy food. but i’m gonna get so lonely without my friends, or a reason to get out of the house everyday. my boyfriend lives here, but i don’t want to put too much strain on our relationship by being together 24/7. what do i do to make the most of this quarantine, and make sure i don’t slip into bad habits? i want to lose weight and maybe learn to meditate. idk. there’s a lot i want to do but i am feeling unmotivated. plus, a lot of bad thoughts are swarming my mind, making things worse. no daily structured distractions anymore ); any tips would be useful :/",2.783789473684209,4.200303466666671,3.987982456140352,88.96894736842106,74.75,6.885964912280703,25.548245614035093,7.475848149327749,1.1286666666666665,912,31,196,11,19,298,138,240,0.18100000000000002,0.728,0.091,-0.9793,1,3,0,0,0,0,35.0,1,0,1,3,11,9,0,2,12,0,26,4,0,5,1,44,47,21,0,7,7,1,3,0,1,5,2,0,1,0,6,11,2,1,5,2,0,5,8,6,0,0,2,3,25,3,27,38,8,24,0,2,0,0,5,10,0,8,8,129,31,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08535272215895261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447455442165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095951886897148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199324574620942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346283037167043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177006766966236,0.0,0.09697055316392304,0.0,0.19672511409039467,0.0,0.2139947333521667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13341379033519296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258991504341014,0.12466211314414627,0.0,0.144824434491357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455166991606775,0.11156116997065008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221659461433261,0.0,0.0,0.14041624799523575,0.0,0.32011841041750266,0.0,0.0,0.2513414640904375,0.0,0.25218811072018193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12648695785165145,0.0,0.1267317238801959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922660406758258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334838396553887,0.0,0.0,0.12043251335339335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617460829134527,0.0,0.0,0.12554634507371445,0.0,0.0,0.12904763032853198,0.0,0.1347533240378966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270252289831076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023434851246564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829393243389393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338484795088745,0.0,0.0,0.0996428095663118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840239737631648,0.0,0.0,0.2961218137041729,0.0,0.10067846015819204,0.15284026517111896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098945505446845,0.0,0.18274901444813754,0.0,0.1279078376770284,0.08916039337105858,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vance_89,2020/03/18,"Personal Victory I don’t wanna go into details yet of what’s been happening the past few months... it’s still very real. 

I ran the vacuum last night. It felt like such a win for me.

I had to throw away two boxes of dishes and kitchen gear that I neglected in the sink and on the stove.

Clearing out those things and running my vacuum. I feel better.

Cheers for small victories?",1.3254666666666708,3.854534346666668,3.078666666666667,87.83266666666668,85.53333333333333,7.066666666666667,20.333333333333336,8.167268648758528,1.3083333333333336,296,9,59,7,9,98,61,75,0.044000000000000004,0.795,0.16,0.836,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,5,0,3,2,0,0,1,11,8,3,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,6,5,2,1,2,0,0,4,1,1,0,1,4,2,7,4,11,4,1,16,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,7,40,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706368113221856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547609157325805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564907829307852,0.0,0.2765776221503156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637080870265835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547257620022151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348029732840663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072894423106408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22992246108247405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27031976115283474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749807427227379,0.0,0.2515181960887365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3278692372833176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300408032331439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913706996131188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.281387521962998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376752410112517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bveevi,2020/03/18,"My (20F) first appointment to the psychiatrist got cancelled today due to the virus outbreak and now I don’t know what to do. I was so excited and feeling extremely positive, my mental health has never been worse and now that my appointment got cancelled I don’t know how to help myself. I can’t get out of my house, I’ve been dealing with intrusive thoughts and anxiety disorder for 7 years and lately it’s been ruining my relationship with my boyfriend, what do I do? I don’t want to lose hope, I’m scared.",4.835457142857141,6.000281460000004,5.793428571428574,78.97100000000002,69.4,10.114285714285714,32.285714285714285,10.290406445055957,3.3933714285714287,406,18,79,11,7,134,62,100,0.151,0.6779999999999999,0.172,0.4985,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,1,2,0,12,1,0,1,1,16,22,7,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,7,1,13,2,10,15,0,9,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,1,8,52,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649951422855532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22235732732390665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.247188763599216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090546405027176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18345789004785748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268426189702893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449991111918921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292584944273807,0.0,0.0,0.14456622434095615,0.0,0.0,0.21421959678799213,0.0,0.2488665656253901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370649402406045,0.0,0.2432972197574116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412915301158166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21735541317665252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634624923947888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315603515228504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21593400274573776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17122638105321025,0.0,0.0,0.20444008116105786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721406274111347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21979705559390006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13889129701419858
mentalhealth,wagwanbruv,2020/03/18,"Monthly Check-in with a therapist Hey all,

After you've ""finished"" therapy - ie. completed the number of sessions that you can afford/are allotted, do any of you ever keep in touch with your therapist on a monthly basis? 

What are your thoughts on a monthly check-in to just get assessed every once in a while, chat about how you're doing and what you can do next?",4.813714285714287,6.109210085714286,5.547142857142859,80.22785714285716,69.57142857142857,8.457142857142857,31.142857142857146,8.841846274778883,2.642228571428571,286,12,52,5,5,93,48,70,0.0,0.973,0.027000000000000003,0.168,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,0,6,0,0,1,2,10,9,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,11,8,2,12,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,8,37,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406656626457035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375407615728167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20493382674018235,0.19088409002949672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836671035700873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20137432001087424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.54250703908197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240945998057534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241275869383659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25908773685420666,0.5261004051085876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179860994875439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heretic1984,2020/03/18,"Struggling to keep my head above water I'm just really damn tired, inside and out. I don't want to go in to it all, but I've recently been diagnosed with adult ADHD and I've lived with depression already more than half my life. I've had a very rough couple of months. We recently moved in with my wife's parents due to unavoidable circumstances. It's a lovely house in the country with loads of space. I can't complain, except for the loss of personal freedom. I don't drive and when we lived in the town I could just take myself off for a walk whenever I wanted.   


The adjustment has caused me to regress somewhat, from a position where my bad days were the exception (took me a long time to arrive there) to where I am now. Everyday is a struggle. My depression has deepend in the last few months. I feel worn down and burnt out. This coronavirus thing is hardly helping, of course. I also suffer from anxiety.   


Thing is, I'm relatively high functioning. I have to be; I'm a stay at home dad to our six year old daughter, who's going to be home for months now thanks to the inevitable lockdown. I get up, get dressed, make food, brush my teeth, I FUNCTION, you know? I don't cry, and I seldom lose my temper. There just aren't any outward signs I'm falling apart...but I am. I really, really am.   


I don't think I've ever felt so worn out in my life, which is ironic. I've just sent off a completed novel to an interested publisher. I should be ecstatic. They may not choose to publish it, of course, but still, it's an achievement. I just...can't take any pleasure in it. Instead I'm crippled by self-doubt. What if they reject it? I've been rejected by publishers before, but I've never gotten this far into the process.   


But it's not really about the book, or the cabin fever of being stuck around the house. Those are contributing factors, sure, but it's more about me, the way I feel about myself. In cognitive behavioural therapy they talk about 'Core Values', and how damaging it can be when those values, which inform so much of our thinking, are skewed. 

I don't have to dig terribly deep to find my defining core value, but I've recently come to realise just how all pervading it is in my life;  I don't like myself very much. In fact, sometimes I loathe myself.  Fundamentally I don't believe I deserve to be happy, or make a success of myself. Fundamentally I feel utterly worthless and unlovable.   


Trying to make myself feel differently is exhausting. The amount of effort just to get to baseline happiness or contentment is Herculean, and it's just...it feels like it's not worth it anymore. 

I am not contemplating suicide. But do I have suicidal ideation? Hell yes. I'm really fucking tired of feeling this way and can't see an end to it. I don't know what to do. Antidepressants, therapy...I've tried. I'm just so damn worn out and discouraged.",2.9891685148026887,5.1573192710951545,4.240327384095469,84.11406026683566,76.21723518850987,7.743851867497449,26.002358573591017,8.613243077465945,1.9860593445277581,2242,84,435,47,51,735,266,557,0.192,0.682,0.126,-0.991,2,3,0,0,0,1,91.0,4,1,3,5,29,32,5,2,25,1,45,14,2,6,6,83,88,29,2,5,24,4,9,2,0,2,8,0,2,2,26,23,2,2,15,2,1,9,16,22,0,2,12,11,55,10,71,67,9,63,1,10,1,2,21,29,4,6,24,282,81,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922545451092672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911110332838196,0.0660261155923775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229221713098747,0.0,0.06316096101809415,0.0,0.08188094848555891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07349914690649899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893719333908517,0.0,0.0,0.07025557921540054,0.09302095264405244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848156047105182,0.0,0.07112126788348272,0.08656640899683922,0.0,0.0,0.06592035078524054,0.09135510075261358,0.0906922851030494,0.05324671950773306,0.0,0.14222388971548794,0.08380035983954562,0.0,0.08626143430921779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312688163746421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468354208100744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504799523993328,0.05898348315866162,0.07927404512592771,0.0,0.07546167406658273,0.0,0.0998362850162407,0.0,0.0,0.07632875767327901,0.12940828756121753,0.0,0.0938456421566272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17578106678177216,0.07396080710428345,0.0,0.08473411747678171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05534066963213668,0.08723302203959478,0.16563613180168618,0.0,0.0,0.19053471796119106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338635959613178,0.0,0.0,0.09074963809164632,0.06730038878455168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17495142854764165,0.0806728511783527,0.0,0.1458104190634225,0.07306622605560271,0.0,0.0923675977154862,0.0,0.0,0.07451691143679064,0.0,0.16533561874630456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197704536761948,0.08775208635445936,0.12138755520991452,0.0,0.06367817147936025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663665477933626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167715496236213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209138856466837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26446191980295203,0.0,0.2445649111560323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579253403439991,0.0,0.08613188626008925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165755421573996,0.0,0.0,0.0880018581486206,0.06593543206614808,0.0,0.0,0.1726268926046896,0.0,0.18062244995474666,0.0,0.07781525656210063,0.0,0.12415516894337995,0.06636152890347106,0.0,0.0760135098311779,0.09441872142735996,0.0,0.10970323165672227,0.10580689750503104,0.0,0.0,0.04814352427616357,0.18978952438163196,0.0,0.0,0.09173124544275747,0.11211058814902933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362473047150696,0.09739635175245258,0.13107035381199553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0531682792289967
mentalhealth,CompleteRanger0,2020/03/18,"hello hello

​

i am 27

​

i was removed from school by my parents. i went to kindergarten and third grade. then i just sort of got left alone in texas with animals or dragged around meth addicts and pedophiles while getting beaten for complaining.

​

the house i was living in in 2016 then burned down.

i got an apartment.

in 2018 it was struck by lightning, and also burned down.

​

i am very tired and dont know what i am supposed to do with myself

i dont fit

i feel near feral

i have no family - i ran away from them

i have had some help from a sympathetic counselor who believes i may have DID and she has said she does not know if she is able to assist me with that - it is not something she is familiar with

​

i am working two jobs and i am tired and scared all of the time

​

i dont know what im supposed to be doing",2.3148302521008444,4.542014748571429,2.9218487394957973,92.44932773109244,78.65714285714286,5.260504201680673,24.579831932773107,6.2272716619740125,0.6172050420168071,691,25,141,5,17,215,103,175,0.13699999999999998,0.8270000000000001,0.035,-0.9245,2,1,2,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,2,3,3,1,1,4,0,24,3,0,0,1,25,34,13,0,1,5,1,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,6,12,0,0,4,0,0,3,6,3,0,2,10,2,25,0,25,22,2,19,0,0,0,0,12,12,0,5,4,105,31,5,0.07169691362125509,0.0,0.0,0.07816021870909434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425637985381256,0.0,0.057335995919536274,0.0,0.4661014557238547,0.5227175860085195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382545375131735,0.0,0.0,0.06736161046524262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077786968655923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274245226693513,0.0,0.2520847463800837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758946930021299,0.0,0.0362521137781219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03745867818612433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146851429212472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04805692989425092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272861210704056,0.0,0.0,0.07744496996310372,0.0,0.07114812375383696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820824606989425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789890643183164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330968827591775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961093781872462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820018328182907,0.0,0.07178111816258473,0.0725611043002461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519578689991953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04180704690386002,0.16481011033113452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003746663895738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059157462445760624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06646375722754375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05219620702239367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5227175860085195,0.0
mentalhealth,thellamajew,2020/03/18,"I have never had dissociative episodes in my life (or any major mental issues) and I started having them yesterday Hey all,  


Just looking for camaraderie more than anything. This whole COVID-19 thing is crazy and I have a weakened immune system. I haven't left my property since Friday and I don't plan to for a very long time. Thankfully we have a decent house with a decent yard and access to delivery services for most things we need.  


But yesterday I realized I was zoning out, eyes wide open, losing large chunks of time, seeing things in 3rd person perspectives. My mind won't stop racing and I am terrified for my parents, my mother in law, and my three living grandparents. But there is not much I can do, because of my immune system.   


On top of it all, I work for a local non profit. I have been having 10-12 hour days virtually setting up help in my community. It is amazing what we are accomplishing, but it gives me little time to focus on myself at the moment, and it is seriously wearing me down. 

If anyone has any tips, advice, or just a comment of solidarity, it is all appreciated.",6.823926282051282,6.944502514423077,7.678653846153848,70.88301282051283,64.72115384615384,10.202564102564104,31.756410256410252,9.928628108626363,3.101402564102564,865,30,151,17,12,291,134,208,0.048,0.846,0.106,0.8697,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,3,0,1,5,3,5,0,0,7,0,22,5,2,0,4,32,28,13,0,2,9,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,10,13,0,1,1,1,1,0,5,2,0,1,3,3,26,3,24,24,8,31,0,1,3,0,11,16,0,4,12,115,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686618600868264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322473854612253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940042875355887,0.0,0.14052218533290636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409464075015162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012705694138142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381001483525853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445785077646678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816570493428445,0.1970358730848644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17823066696798998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855328966632797,0.0,0.12061391519681013,0.0,0.17114790881307482,0.15078555515999578,0.15111857616221028,0.14339667369543682,0.19103846748107456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720874537620648,0.0,0.17242046171272699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12552936902184073,0.126617507150666,0.13170181527168254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18961046536017365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491023771387732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360748269359929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125569816412584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086588637095005,0.0,0.0,0.14276428117904208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721426977819047,0.0,0.0,0.3403391087095657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987172555419031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408961418016287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906491445291909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431642403318414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iirrii123,2020/03/18,"How do I power through this mental exhaustion I'm so tired. I got home and just started crying in the parking lot, still in my car.

I work with very self-centered people. I sometimes wish they were openly mean and rude, so I could just say they're terrible people. But they're the kinda people who just don't about others. When it comes to emotional support, you're kinda just on your own.

And then on top of that, the two main managers I work with are just...exhausting. Once again, not particularly cruel, but they play a lot of mental gymnastics or are verbose and confusing and I just feel so tired after a conversation with them.

But what makes me feel pathetic is that in the 10 hours I work with them, I feel a little grateful I have them to talk to, even if they dominate the conversation or confuse with the weird places the conversation goes to.

And what's worse is that in this case, all I feel is exhausted and unfulfilled. In case of the people who don't talk to me, I begin to feel rather left out on purpose. Like I'm the problem. I don't feel this way anywhere else. Just at work. And it's disheartening and hurtful.

But what do I peg them on? You didn't ask me about my day? You don't just come to my desk to have a chat? That sounds whiny.

I sometimes think if I make the effort myself, it could work. But in the past I've tried, and I've just gotten nervous. I don't feel like myself. And I'm so AWARE how I'm not myself. Like I'm watching myself outside of my body. I don't feel united with myself.

A new guy joined, and he was cute to boot. We had some nice conversations, some jokes. I figured we could be friends. I was a bit confident in the beginning, but still self-conscious. So if he did even the slightest thing unexpected, I would get nervous.

And now it's dissipated, whatever it was before. I blame myself, and then feel bad for blaming myself, because no one should make me want to be perfect ALL the time. But I also feel like it's my fault, because I just can't be OKAY. I want to be okay.

Today, I thought a million times of talking to him. But I kept thinking I need the perfect time. When he's not around people or when he's on a coffee break. But none of that happened. Or maybe it did and I chose to do something else instead so I wouldn't talk to him. And then finally it was 5 PM and I was miserable and unfulfilled. 

I don't know what to do. I'm so sad. Not all the time. I want people to stop affecting me like this.",1.1948440127031574,3.390857039603962,2.8000971417896534,91.95822903045023,82.56435643564356,5.791518774518963,21.409490005604333,7.052630249996997,0.5233399962637777,1915,60,416,25,53,628,211,505,0.19399999999999998,0.701,0.105,-0.9939,1,0,1,0,0,0,70.0,2,3,7,10,33,32,2,5,24,2,39,5,1,6,5,110,80,50,0,16,30,0,10,5,1,3,4,2,1,1,25,31,0,2,16,3,0,3,16,17,0,3,14,13,64,15,48,56,11,50,0,4,1,0,33,20,0,15,30,285,89,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062245847648391577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929101704048841,0.07276665158100712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499025416524426,0.09489685663132304,0.0,0.06623315700244208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497733500101437,0.0864588416308677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13409856283433375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186438414940481,0.0,0.08549977703156944,0.05019812479529883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004487180061008,0.08755562357805408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282059245021986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39356490019496704,0.11121287004469432,0.0,0.08526611773367103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060136312632609074,0.0,0.040666376123575015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06225298627260423,0.0,0.0,0.07707040552070114,0.0688305894375528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807638941572792,0.0,0.07665330643561934,0.0,0.08332561887152991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04277692316229053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456962129927753,0.0,0.0,0.19013499275083925,0.07801265487032988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13234767449302232,0.0,0.0,0.155869471390244,0.0,0.07819725975399577,0.0847868034478635,0.0,0.0,0.15688183666347216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057714803262216785,0.0,0.07517500899990842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289336777464522,0.052744049465611176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743037785295447,0.3237723104079872,0.0,0.0813226107543905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07447905042228763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061898735499293076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16240095973275934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0599223661698849,0.15396464363988793,0.0,0.055093098971788906,0.0,0.12432071225750385,0.06507482722208112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832797571182466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502482286458586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051711134169983484,0.09974901541849117,0.0,0.0617935131043532,0.1815484343105401,0.17892328988203576,0.07377993248806101,0.0,0.0,0.05284589686282929,0.0,0.07603498305333192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422329176651798,0.13773001224515966,0.06178301723041341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950817207428836,0.0,0.0,0.2833296167646041,0.0,0.07932207730839773,0.05529284009697887,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TravelbugRunner,2020/03/18,"I Think I Might Be Turning Into A Sociopath?! I've been finding myself lashing out at people more whenever they decide to treat me like shit online. I would never have done that in the past. 

Now, I'd love to rip into anyone who fucks with me and I don't care if I hurt their feelings. 

This is a little unnerving. Am I really a Sociopath? Can this be changed? Or am I just overreacting.",1.0791025641025629,3.4754733205128265,3.220769230769232,87.40756410256414,85.02564102564101,5.51794871794872,21.48717948717949,6.937597516519254,0.7557333333333341,301,10,59,4,9,102,61,78,0.11599999999999999,0.722,0.162,0.569,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,0,2,7,2,0,4,0,12,3,1,0,1,15,18,3,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,1,12,4,8,12,1,9,0,1,0,2,4,6,2,3,4,47,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749533899459508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258813372194773,0.0,0.2685358836440616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597730503899348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835239157913114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232011055086018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346769511839483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717478732649649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401655244337804,0.2544208292224186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291063305718162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26929096680575376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957820301977272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423251583895977,0.1759851651209207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16262053500010654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260569731483647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16265455430965153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761120420934107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180325233783144,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trvpicha,2020/03/18,"Thoughts on Trauma Resulting from COVID-19? Has anyone else been thinking about the trauma that this pandemic may lead to for us, others, or everyone experiencing this? Does anyone have any thoughts or even expertise on this topic? 

I am thankful that, for some, things are still okay. There’s still water and electricity. But, i am in a constant state of anxiousness waiting for things to get worse. I get enraged when i see people still going out to bars and clubs. I feel panicked thinking about how long this will last. I think I am prepared in terms of food and basic needs but have lingering thoughts about one day not having what I need. And i feel a lot, a lot of sadness for those who are vulnerable, for this situation, for things getting cancelled, for people losing income, for others being sad, and so much more. I feel so sad, angry, and anxious but I am pushing these feelings deep down so I can do my work, finish school, and get through this. 

This makes me wonder, i’m sure a lot of other people are doing the same kind of thing. Could there be trauma from this afterwards or some behaviors as a result from the trauma from this experience? Unsure if that makes sense but I could see something happening to me or others like if things get really bad, then, when this ends, a behavior that could develop is like hoarding cause you’re afraid this will happen again or reliving the experience through dreams for a long time after.",6.220262172284645,7.463683104868918,5.972528089887643,78.6623127340824,66.26591760299625,8.779775280898876,29.814606741573034,8.998388855275968,2.438991011235955,1147,40,203,19,18,357,151,267,0.188,0.7490000000000001,0.062,-0.9889,1,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,0,3,17,17,1,1,11,1,24,3,0,7,1,52,52,26,0,7,12,0,4,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,28,8,3,1,11,3,0,3,1,11,0,1,4,7,17,6,35,40,9,29,0,4,2,0,2,7,0,14,20,157,45,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732077121493865,0.0,0.0,0.22367492443295464,0.0,0.13844080838405684,0.10143324620023401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265764341560712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016963074745064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10697966037110763,0.0,0.2371210917553635,0.0,0.0,0.06384432177957097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663219090066901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269857365069108,0.0,0.08768119811251134,0.0,0.0,0.0653860180706665,0.0,0.0,0.09459505597273014,0.0,0.1936744452986782,0.0,0.0,0.20022169538528575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970652774070208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586069911406069,0.0,0.05626178880924322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750839226862996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308924785299196,0.0,0.08069506848824982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967290288889662,0.0,0.0,0.17521694071069638,0.0,0.11075136055465386,0.0,0.25248893912572296,0.0,0.0,0.1321613868729261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072773554939208,0.14680876968785445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708234779231143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20589438005200705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341946344277839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018938075544466,0.15777421604257005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127581127231524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621206654918104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371753404016657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330269217034318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114234691118377,0.0,0.0,0.3288431891627337,0.19029819132317327,0.0,0.2357756360787765,0.057725446448275174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908016963327404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735709299879552,0.07207037034218451,0.0,0.10088552607398653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jfery14,2020/03/18,Tried to get help and feeling pretty discouraged This is just a rant I guess (I live in NY in the US). Prior to the whole pandemic situation my depression was getting pretty bad and I made an appointment with my doctor to talk about changing meds. It was supposed to be yesterday but I got a call that they were cancelling it because my doctor determined my needs to be non-urgent. My dad called them and advocated for me and now the doctor is supposed to call me to consult over the phone but I just feel like she doesn’t respect my problems anymore since she can so easily deem that I don’t need urgent help without even talking to me. I guess I’m just sad that I tried to get help and failed and it seems like mental health is nobody’s priority right now so a lot of us are going to be having a tough time the next few months,3.5070741758241724,4.974119625,4.6214285714285745,84.94664835164836,72.98809523809524,7.550183150183152,26.01831501831502,8.139509932561175,1.5472265567765566,659,22,133,10,13,216,102,168,0.128,0.69,0.182,0.8827,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,2,0,2,1,9,10,0,0,10,0,14,4,0,1,0,24,28,10,0,3,6,1,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,5,2,23,3,18,20,3,12,0,4,0,0,17,4,0,4,9,91,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938672422746235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10051404926800707,0.07338382843193145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687708394124853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12734833027730375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368495122534288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696486298752668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951126078865238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12173764290188176,0.0860010169408364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886840812859419,0.0,0.06841593806206557,0.0,0.0962805855994238,0.0,0.26522897397280465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12796057370033706,0.0,0.0,0.242068810369249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762525489029647,0.0,0.10629962532301213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234458108652797,0.0,0.11390848108486185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371740700142246,0.0,0.12131687175398514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608786677680667,0.0,0.0,0.17852364644833635,0.0,0.0,0.1280277597923973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24494380649909714,0.0,0.1151894393972642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280568032524476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959136891551104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958134102205264,0.13531455669895226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19351719043432355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019578744999737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634631268675076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896097576162341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344023478250418,0.0,0.1160440764149176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,23ira23,2020/03/18,"Feeling unlucky and down This may not be as serious as some of the other stories here but i needed somewhere to vent.

I graduated univeristy 2 years ago and haven't been able to find work outside of summer work since then.  I had plans of going back to study (for masters) when i finished anyway but finding more than 2 references was difficult for me since I'm not the most talkative and out going person. The few universities I did apply to rejected me.
Fast forward to early last year i heard a scholarship opportunity for masters in Japan and after going through the entire process and thinking I wouldnt make it several times I got confirmed for it earlier this year to start in April. 
On another note i got braces in 2018 that were supposed to come off next week. I was so excited to  about to be rid of them since anyone who has had braces knows the amount of stress that comes with them.
So my schedule for the next couple weeks was prepare to leave ->get braces off ->leave the next week
My country yesterday reported its first two cases of Covid-19. This morning the orthodontist  cancelled my last appointment until further notice. 
Along with the various travel advisories I'm not sure if I'll be leave the country.

These last 2 years have been rough in my mental health. I felt like i was a waste of space that I'm only burdening my family. I though this year would be finally time to turn my life around. Then this happens. nothing of this scale happened for the 2 years i was doing nothing but now just weeks before, everything i have been looking foward to is gone.

It feels like this always happens to me. I'm not one to get excited about much but when i do it feels like something beyond my control ruins everything I'm looking forward to.

I guess a silver lining would be i may be able to postpone going to Japan till october and HOPE that everything calms down by then. But to endure so many more months feeling this.....

I'm probably just over reacting but I just dont know anymore....",5.458131665697111,6.843342589005238,5.619924374636419,79.96991758774485,68.13612565445025,8.695908473918946,31.687415163854947,9.049649993220411,2.7519316269148733,1607,67,290,29,27,508,203,382,0.08199999999999999,0.83,0.08800000000000001,0.5079,0,1,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,2,8,17,15,0,1,14,0,31,2,0,3,1,52,67,26,0,6,14,0,6,3,0,5,2,1,0,1,20,13,0,1,11,1,1,10,7,6,0,3,17,9,31,9,58,39,8,65,0,2,2,0,5,17,0,7,45,197,51,5,0.1651295457758313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318868949180563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870050516879952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657636332814457,0.0,0.0,0.08188206888851826,0.05773120892981984,0.0,0.0,0.07350015261861184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348721393152773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025654054474906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422444821166471,0.0,0.0,0.09260341341893603,0.0,0.09135635079339996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676529891429504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22261168219310926,0.0,0.07783471980211501,0.0,0.16698891986391845,0.11796858049669726,0.07927512985780248,0.09044567296449617,0.15092541326515296,0.07022955364022727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627337219720993,0.0,0.1876938525525613,0.0,0.13206918262802012,0.0,0.090954405770841,0.0,0.219035267971302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877624926770137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200544909507886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907508798476953,0.20190392903127988,0.0,0.26227251922865663,0.0,0.0,0.05831794082115531,0.12101093257580077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866722951287086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055112627028652314,0.08370772065481548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320587162918673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659024140052535,0.0,0.06069460809714501,0.06122073292195091,0.0,0.0,0.2634257179296737,0.0,0.0,0.15844625274038768,0.09400054116852204,0.0,0.0,0.055948026901968935,0.06279423029241754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209237501397782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901878971454356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327469223509433,0.0,0.2048953000011146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356239591895936,0.0,0.0,0.058439771208620574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457766838585864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781632133290932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052904172647165466,0.08111947015812823,0.0,0.0962883660785178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980676383067898,0.08065378598077033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264913922321434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021627600820345,0.0,0.0,0.11730329152102748,0.0,0.0,0.3190140404844358
mentalhealth,marshmellian,2020/03/18,"Face-to-face therapy vs Online therapy? Hi, so I'm in a position where I would have to decide between traditional face-to-face therapy and online therapy (CBT). If I choose the former the wait will be quite a bit longer before I can actually go in.

I was just wondering of anyone has any advice or experience with online therapy that they would like to share, I'm having a bit of a hard time making a decision.

Thank you!",3.3385714285714267,5.223287228915666,5.952358003442343,73.50602409638556,74.30120481927709,10.04406196213425,26.314974182444054,10.290406445055957,3.143899827882961,332,12,61,11,7,119,56,83,0.019,0.878,0.10300000000000001,0.7263,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,1,3,3,0,0,7,0,9,0,0,1,0,14,16,4,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,6,3,8,11,2,6,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,3,3,37,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.1389478396008287,0.0,0.0,0.13913759382712235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682711386485954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955934606087599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115968750347225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31089646997261994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928047190498688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092103719192721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754956085103686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956242869207416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09504351646853182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514446485618027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13108956185459472,0.8141519086720912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302620833474189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441114652126856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20229333857911716,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Big_fatty_boi_69,2020/03/18,"I have very strong suicidal tendencies, and I unintentionally scared my friends with it. I really don't know why I do that... they've been nothing but helpful to me but I treat them like that. I want to stop. I love them but I know I'm getting super difficult to be with.

My last suicide attempt was a week ago.",1.2371428571428569,3.5911457301587326,3.2787301587301587,87.5857142857143,83.76190476190476,6.7746031746031745,24.87301587301588,7.957251820313856,1.525196825396825,243,10,52,5,7,82,45,63,0.24600000000000002,0.46399999999999997,0.29,0.5587,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,2,3,0,8,0,1,1,0,6,1,0,0,0,10,12,4,2,1,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,13,6,5,9,0,4,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,32,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22636080015599386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972901257679637,0.0,0.13341480560942967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116209835728974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806778194803549,0.2081520849168756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475575900995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23047192976535297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450243391504409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16358984244304978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25565941965448713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21349198653745052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.558643719893408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106983410715189,0.1506176565002547,0.0,0.2048339977308124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304222412330141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jdarbuckle,2020/03/18,"Requesting research on the effectiveness of certain self-care habits in mental health improvement. Hello everyone, I hope you are staying healthy. 

I am currently in progress of a new mobile app startup to gamify mental health improvement in young adults. 

Much like Calm, we will be guiding users through building healthy habits. 

I think many of us can subjectively say things like: 

\- Exercise  
\- Nutrition   
\- Meditation   
\- Journaling   
\- Socializing   
\- Organization   
\- Going outside   
\- Gratitude 

Can have a truly positive effect on our mental health. 

I am looking for published research papers that can show the measured results of these habits. 

Can anyone help? 

There is a subreddit rule about posting research papers, so if they also cannot be commented with, please send me a PM. 

Eternally thankful!",6.9938095238095235,10.777630285714288,6.369206349206357,65.42857142857147,71.53968253968254,9.631746031746033,38.36507936507937,9.784248007369934,5.280117460317459,640,37,80,19,14,197,95,126,0.0,0.705,0.295,0.9914,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,3,1,1,3,4,6,0,0,6,0,13,4,0,3,1,9,18,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,1,4,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,3,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,10,6,14,15,1,14,0,0,1,0,13,5,0,2,7,51,13,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248540843777198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583958968433268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583037920386699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415348850736507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5282950762596084,0.0,0.0,0.11104441255786776,0.0,0.0,0.16454665944379018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187497238498072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912020263564112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16796232391135593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5008660414803993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178574861599722,0.0,0.0,0.16000411510057422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18185476997064226,0.0,0.0,0.15866506972370287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317466074320118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17282885761647065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688786427855218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17658106971007184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525257211698643,0.0,0.0,0.11006309641712653,0.10615398093406718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992793620735281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Muw8kYxhoETa4,2020/03/18,"Problems with motivation/concentration Hello,  
I need an advice about managing problems with concentration.  
It's difficult for me to concentrate few hours on something I have to do unless I really feel the drive. I usually start checking social networks, news, reddit, etc... I have a good job, I can say I am good in it and always can do what is required, I learn new stuff, but in last 3 years I haven't done any side projects. I even can't even force myself do required work for my existing hobby project which requires just a few hours of work. Same happens for some books, movies. It's just hard to enjoy them as easy as before and to find motivation to focus. In the same time I can be sort of addicted to some Netflix series or computer games. I don't do that often but when I do I just have to watch all series or win/finish the game. Same happens with tobacco, alcohol and porn. It's difficult(but doable) for me to limit usage of those if I have already started. I stopped smoking and watching porn about 4 months ago but haven't noticed any improvements. It's also difficult for me to develop good habits like meditation or running. I quit very fast.   
I began to think that I could have problem with mental health, maybe something with dopamine receptors. I haven't really tried any practice and haven't talked to therapist about it. I was tested by a therapist (questionnaires, associations, paintings and other standard tools). Was told I am normal.  
I need an advice how I can be more focused at work, enjoy books, movies and be less addictable. Maybe I should go to another therapist?  
ps. not a native speaker, sorry for the mistakes

Thank you!",4.571725168035847,6.751346925566344,5.198398058252426,78.96046489917852,71.65372168284792,8.248991784914116,29.683968135424447,8.950670267944501,2.6880623848643266,1316,55,229,27,26,423,173,309,0.07200000000000001,0.8109999999999999,0.11599999999999999,0.9466,1,0,4,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,1,9,12,13,0,0,10,0,31,6,0,2,1,54,43,20,0,10,12,0,2,1,0,1,4,2,0,0,13,12,1,5,5,5,1,3,7,6,0,0,5,6,32,7,38,33,11,24,0,0,2,2,9,6,0,8,16,159,45,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219337591375021,0.0,0.19893737303231995,0.09023130709922517,0.10878329363189006,0.0,0.0,0.1123285602313372,0.0814019799232891,0.08469801034559994,0.0,0.0,0.20766348411749228,0.10673641625828736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661638197978913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127158508436952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416721928207867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352352916219012,0.13446358461711402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051468432537298436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930348487448338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057849996249089215,0.2561316100343013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18002634621198246,0.0,0.09118446664622797,0.0,0.0,0.1081987460565166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004866556488205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101155562933434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297300011545869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04972979065220737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20452486419679972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258107649642284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124835952082575,0.0,0.0,0.15095301723468293,0.0,0.09831008500213984,0.0,0.0,0.09973326632566372,0.0,0.11588937794302097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921998364337812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082669310140644,0.0,0.0,0.13041944808129646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809480441627601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376279208103367,0.0,0.15672689608052884,0.0,0.11394634639683393,0.14409595196601754,0.0,0.0,0.08510157671827022,0.0,0.0,0.11652598956956388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181550277512856,0.0,0.09371519353609567,0.0,0.35456051812325395,0.0,0.06522336555146653,0.0,0.0,0.05935497130800591,0.0,0.0,0.0972653687169253,0.0,0.06910919841200673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210806677995766,0.08398798160025897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22231450912990935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554986855616676
mentalhealth,velvetscars,2020/03/18,Appetite Finally started taking my anti depressants at the same time everyday and now my appetite is god damn crazy but ik my ed is about to hit me like a truck haha fuck my life,1.779166666666665,4.2677952500000025,3.653333333333337,84.90000000000002,82.6111111111111,6.933333333333335,25.66666666666667,8.07648339933343,1.9514666666666671,143,6,27,3,4,48,31,36,0.247,0.568,0.185,-0.2382,0,0,0,0,1,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,2,1,2,2,0,0,0,3,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,3,5,1,6,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,6,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.387500027354986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4928457695224289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159272502747024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177791648722448,0.21979944509288826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3184430284833332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33827039506558737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623415378569449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thewizardsmoke,2020/03/18,"Idk what write here but just know I'm really depressed right now. Heres a little recap on what's got me down.


I broke my glasses. (Ik that's not that bad but it doesnt help my situation.)


My brother, whom Ive hardly seen since middle school and miss dearly, is now in jail for beating his wife pretty brutally. So badly in fact he's actually lucky they only charged him with domestic abuse, yea it was B A D. 


I recently learned the woman I had wanted to spend the rest of my life with is having SOMEONE ELSE'S  baby.


My grandmother, who wasnt in the best health to begin with (she has to wear an oxygen tank and is allergic to basically everything but water and sunlight), was recently admitted to the hospital with pneumonia. I'm worried she won't make it much longer.

I'm worried about my other grandparents because my spoiled rotten aunt is driving herself and my grandparents to bankruptcy.


I'm so depressed, somedays I can't make it to work which has caused me to use A LOT of the time I was going to use to travel this summer and to go to my cousin's wedding.



I feel so alone and unloved.",2.7129452054794503,4.801776219178088,4.306070776255709,83.69335273972605,76.76255707762556,7.485022831050228,26.47511415525114,8.395991825355821,1.9630089497716896,868,34,168,17,20,290,139,219,0.261,0.6729999999999999,0.067,-0.9944,2,1,0,0,1,0,22.0,0,0,1,3,9,12,1,0,9,1,16,5,1,5,1,29,34,12,0,1,5,4,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,13,10,1,0,4,1,1,4,5,9,0,0,7,4,24,3,25,26,4,19,0,4,1,0,18,8,0,2,7,108,37,3,0.0,0.18434894842513905,0.15183359411009842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611445269051236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598226412331211,0.09484634369939496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632823190449707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598339979209518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680192279555356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299756498264579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13983444206994228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867108167118961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768509960466341,0.0,0.12443969888832385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937826098493816,0.0,0.0,0.16538511021418642,0.0,0.0,0.10428883346545406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550830661158122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989796182825742,0.0,0.15594225856141358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322772267531306,0.0,0.0,0.2077153375502133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437670174769632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833336065267122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829117228328288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967506824770404,0.0,0.3072531101217934,0.0,0.0,0.13287318335296147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574655921443515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287058238639741,0.17488990730573012,0.0,0.0,0.13183107421304258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072589867545147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26875995940930714,0.0,0.0,0.09177113301639443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327152095785427,0.3160188076380657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SimpleLife2019,2020/03/18,"Found out my girlfriend has mental illness I just found out that my girlfriend has been taking medications for a mental illness. She wouldn't go into details, but said she used to have hallucinations, which occurred after drinking alcohol. She was then put on meds. I asked her if its possible to wean off the meds, but she said they are for life. What mental illness does this sound like, and should I be concerned for her well being? Are there alternative treatments for these illnesses, or will she always be dependent on a pill?",6.3768303571428575,8.194877427083338,5.983571428571429,76.59000000000003,66.39583333333334,8.402380952380952,31.42261904761905,8.841846274778883,2.7072994047619043,427,17,71,7,7,132,69,96,0.11699999999999999,0.825,0.057999999999999996,-0.7193,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,13,9,0,2,0,15,21,6,0,3,5,0,0,1,2,3,8,3,0,0,6,4,2,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,6,3,13,2,13,9,0,10,0,0,0,0,13,6,0,3,3,57,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18487935333852268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14394593929782962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16172724311380154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138934370989005,0.0,0.0,0.16946952379800595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3793608116531293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831720974876088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219168911190018,0.08451676016127686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38431753546352976,0.1742745542286375,0.5230156889238143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19502619598638127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739080476518045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3291162718347053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007092823795147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941238608769608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555435412353353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DignifiedHobo,2020/03/18,"I work in a grocery store. I suffer from anxiety, minor depressive disorder, and PTSD. 

I'm currently employed full time in a grocery store and this entire pandemic is draining me completely. I recently worked 9 days straight, doing overtime to meet the demands of these panic shoppers. 

I'm fucking scared out of my mind right now. Everything that usually goes through my head on a day to day basis is coming through. I've always had fears at my work of ""what if our shelves go empty?"" ""What if we can't get the supplies or stock we need?"" 

Everything I've been scared of is coming true. 

I'm also a high risk person. I suffer from asthma and have had bronchitis and pneumonia more times than I can count. I'm scared for my own life but I know that if I dont show up to work, people won't get the food and necessities they need to survive right now. 

What am I supposed to do? Now is not the time to talk to a therapist. How do I deal with this anxiety?",3.396280701754385,4.949509926315796,4.690000000000001,83.99833333333336,73.42105263157895,8.224561403508767,28.456140350877188,8.841846274778883,2.2540245614035093,746,30,149,15,15,247,115,190,0.136,0.846,0.019,-0.9437,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,3,0,1,5,5,11,1,6,9,0,16,5,1,1,1,23,29,12,0,5,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,8,11,1,0,1,1,2,3,4,10,0,0,3,0,18,1,24,25,3,26,0,3,0,1,8,11,1,4,12,94,26,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015292248989368,0.10564022335789187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19424687817859104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21872821495721234,0.13311430377025085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456345392211147,0.13088935854260556,0.10934977133951218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550624031971168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14879523469998854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228205481858536,0.0,0.0,0.1428643946873987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535195663647137,0.0,0.0,0.1173717329050546,0.13266188198119555,0.0,0.07215383808982798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302967650410482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413936339902455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977345503850584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896750362895013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281925981418625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18827727348199794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895926415261002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880175223498364,0.1108558747881854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840850860928215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535689171056782,0.0,0.0,0.2168449230696222,0.0,0.0,0.3813249167061037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020449943515327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474094144423479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22209278827662865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398276201121109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3697112333470344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,0100110001112,2020/03/18,"The calm app has free resources for helping handle anxiety brought on by COVID-19 The site is [right here. ](https://www.calm.com/blog/take-a-deep-breath?utm_source=lifecycle&utm_medium=email&utm_campaign=difficult_times_nonsubs_031720)

I got the email this morning and haven’t had a chance to go through it, but I like the free version of the app. 

I searched a bit but didn’t find it had been posted yet. I hope this is able to help.",10.869897435897435,15.02844278461539,6.062692307692312,70.89147435897438,59.615384615384606,5.564102564102565,26.21794871794872,6.42735559955562,0.6595641025641026,371,10,57,2,6,96,48,65,0.019,0.6729999999999999,0.308,0.9620000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,7,0,8,0,0,0,0,5,12,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,6,0,4,7,7,6,2,7,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,35,8,0,0.262566188973802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5689807121082389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008624158896956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866542743126624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399807399344724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922241603401107,0.0,0.2099981672001891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3519851636228287,0.0,0.0,0.26078747013826553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282765772021082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25146582903854586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22423009074634406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19741709734290155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Exella,2020/03/18,"I get in this crazy mood when I get irritated, but don't know what the root of it is. I want to fix this, but need your help to know where this comes from. This is not the first time this has happened.
Something doesn't go my way, so my mood drops. I expect the person to ignore it, so eventually I ignore it myself and feel better, but the person always notices, and stops whatever their doing, which stresses me out and irritates me even more, until eventually I get really pissed out of nowhere.

Usually, I was fine with it, I would deal with it on my own and the other person wouldn't even know that for about 30 minutes I was going absolutely crazy inside.
But now, I have a boyfriend. I love him to death, but I've had this happen to me a few times with him. He is the sweetest, and is extremely patient, and I become his priority in this situation. But I'm sick of this happening, and it ruining our days of hanging out, and I'm so scared one day it'll be too much for him.

When I get angry, he unintentionally gets a little upset too, which then makes me feel absolutely awful, and then he tries to fix things, I mean, he tries so so hard, but when I'm in these moods, I don't want to move or even talk, so I feel even more horrible for intentionally not making efforts when he's trying his hardest, but mentally I'm truly stuck, and then he feels bad because he thinks he's not good enough for me, and then that's what just tears my heart apart, because I want to make an effort and apologize and feel better, but it feels like a nightmare when you just can't scream for help. I'm just silent in front of him, but inside I'm bawling my eyes out.
And I know that if I force myself to speak I'll cry, and for some reason my brain refuses to do so. 

I want to work on this, and never be like this anymore, but the thing is, I don't know where to start. I know you're not in my head so it's hard to tell, but if you have any idea what my problem might be (anxiety? ego? fear? etc..), I'd love to hear.",5.998959899749372,4.530095571770335,6.767593984962407,81.9948245614035,66.96650717703349,9.971474139895193,28.995670995671002,8.841846274778883,1.8506120756436548,1551,38,352,21,21,517,191,418,0.205,0.696,0.099,-0.9948,0,0,1,0,0,0,58.0,1,3,1,6,26,22,1,4,12,1,25,8,5,6,1,83,69,49,1,11,22,0,8,2,0,4,1,3,0,3,31,24,0,4,16,0,0,6,11,11,0,2,4,12,48,8,42,58,8,43,0,1,1,2,33,15,1,5,22,232,79,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527399398168766,0.0,0.0,0.0615191934650858,0.0,0.06920535509206946,0.0,0.08971681278876048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553436279595724,0.1102930537671233,0.09991130847040232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16001759910881436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098868011242862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792744947412351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937137898946306,0.116684675838445,0.09326527788401358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347436263817244,0.10089221005388796,0.2390046948664977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179809587740067,0.27445044802713714,0.06462809986999543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694934680701497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363207258664383,0.0,0.1028265068264574,0.07587761583210778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399932781067385,0.0,0.16207745531552828,0.0,0.09284302508813776,0.0,0.10196044961933386,0.10720127113421953,0.12127335085442273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021237930971068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29830266167783603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839310267125566,0.09066953578406813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16329610041462275,0.0,0.18115794978843225,0.0,0.0,0.098542731586444,0.0,0.0,0.0911672813011707,0.09596889934579736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614980833636387,0.0665020665190142,0.06707853268616608,0.06977206169457033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299482009352386,0.0,0.0,0.061301316925668536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23697122704967866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656263446810789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05795409307673624,0.09301292255924992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057108669664844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168627064282472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964425365009294,0.0,0.0,0.0640314794693347,0.0,0.0,0.07563265710238719,0.10362716872877367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271221175532272,0.07907025767945333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020164005066475,0.05796621674999666,0.0,0.0,0.10550155156635713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842590645559918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09963424063516467,0.0,0.21343402630525612,0.07180677930948333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658594810511823,0.0,0.0,0.06426362687065136,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vanessaivine,2020/03/18,"Is it social anxiety disorder or something else? Im confused if I have social anxiety disorder or something else. I undergo the same symptoms experienced under SAD i.e rapid heart rate, hyperventilation, trembling, trouble concentrating and restlessness but it's not because I think I will be ridiculed by people or I'll be embarrassed Infront of them , it is just triggered by the presence of people. Merely the presence of human beings or sitting close to them even if it is my own parents results in the symptoms being triggered.",7.411537267080746,9.749459315217392,7.74875776397516,62.91673913043479,64.54347826086956,9.604968944099381,42.49068322981367,9.957137785484203,5.206181366459627,435,27,57,10,7,142,61,92,0.231,0.769,0.0,-0.9448,1,0,2,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,0,2,7,1,4,4,0,9,3,1,3,0,17,10,8,0,2,9,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,0,1,7,0,8,5,2,4,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,7,0,45,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882186650940217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483402073297873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4317970485913259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.314732774818584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244224778811948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22322988749629075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034815233853809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20917246030582232,0.0,0.0,0.26119640155276425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3840571033222399,0.0,0.2900465403550752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3915955840951603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207055840549345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,learner50,2020/03/18,"Anyone over here think that when am I going to get my first girlfriend, when am I going to be able to talk more and socialize , when am I going be happy with my life and be grateful? Are there any more when am I's here or is it just me ? PS- MY FIRST POST LOL.",2.0560526315789467,2.547641228070177,3.6306578947368418,94.41335526315792,75.31578947368422,6.401754385964912,19.513157894736842,5.985473137389443,-0.281347368421053,198,3,49,1,4,66,36,57,0.0,0.825,0.175,0.8908,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,8,1,0,0,0,1,9,1,0,0,0,6,14,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,8,1,5,11,2,11,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,6,39,10,0,0.2809344974765677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19104509193847447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964359326880372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4779254800762278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14677667978772735,0.0,0.4789846471619051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29905999651956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843234378783603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690575911147537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2863773412618588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258045074620369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18001148234515804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CloudyPlanet_,2020/03/18,"Bestfriends ignore me Just want to vent and maybe someone has encouraging words for me. My best friend (f) and I (m) know each other since roughly 3+ years we've gotten pretty close 2 years ago and I would call her my best friend since we've graduated. We saw each other at least 2 times a week to watch movies eat sushi etc. And then started working together and saw us nearly everday at work but not privately anymore, a few weeks ago she started to cut our conversations short, replied only with short answers who made it clear she wasn't interested in talking with me. Now with the Worldwide quarantine we aren't able to work anymore and I haven't seen her in 2 weeks and written only 1 or 2 times since then. I am torn apart if I should try to engage less in trying to establish more contact and give her more space, because I know that I have no right to demand contact from her, and showing her that she kinda hurts me with her behaviour because I know that she likes me and if we met everything would be fine between us. But im also scared that if I show her that im hurt that she will interpretate this as, ""hey give me attention"". It's just that I want a little bit more contact from here, I am tired of one sided friendships even tho I know that she wouldn't hurt me intentionally (I hope). Sorry that this got so long, formatting because of mobile, english isn't my first nor second language and I don't even want to start with gramatics. Thanks for listening.",6.033565797453001,6.0709561649484565,6.1704184354154075,81.31213462704672,66.38831615120276,9.046371538306047,31.20699413786133,8.671277953709913,2.260129007479281,1168,41,233,16,17,372,163,291,0.11900000000000001,0.758,0.12300000000000001,-0.4584,0,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,6,0,0,6,9,17,1,1,4,0,15,2,0,2,1,52,38,24,0,11,9,0,1,1,2,5,1,1,0,0,16,22,1,1,7,2,0,0,9,6,0,3,9,6,43,11,27,23,12,31,0,3,4,0,34,14,0,6,18,150,59,4,0.09850380028807022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17463535115232134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877345350192694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19537860225009165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18014100712916506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20674732240159305,0.0,0.10754063765397284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058339347923197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079397919539668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10985777562486464,0.13012166215760845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852886413720895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378728220434284,0.0,0.0,0.1522075835066431,0.0,0.0,0.18898764199970888,0.0,0.0,0.07878248758377701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783649972805106,0.0,0.0,0.3163510665373045,0.0,0.2128020152962234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165404501655793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04812398120161023,0.09872668576549777,0.0,0.08717276352111765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320667755482301,0.0,0.0,0.0989603072000042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06674872437358505,0.14983315774063505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021377764840728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08412170723039117,0.0,0.0,0.09861948821525633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444500845254314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346195032716787,0.0,0.0,0.11026693979758397,0.20916449052052136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917362341391257,0.0,0.09068906490231017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487671618910394,0.11321562793673785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13375522887266128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369758865870274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17430028066609932,0.0,0.23704142080035198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21513581935294315,0.0,0.0,0.13994854702509282,0.0,0.0,0.12686643562312966
mentalhealth,super_reddit_mentor,2020/03/18,"What is the best way to debunk that stupid article that says blood type A is most likely to die from viral infections like COVID 19? Compared to any other blood group.

I need to get this stupid, crap article out of my head (I'm blood type A)

Please explain why it's all made-up crap please!",2.67135593220339,4.4139354576271215,3.212,93.05122033898306,75.77966101694916,6.753898305084746,20.274576271186444,7.554174236665415,0.4098244067796615,228,5,50,3,5,71,45,59,0.226,0.619,0.155,-0.7316,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,0,7,4,0,3,0,2,7,6,0,1,5,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,3,7,6,3,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,2,1,2,23,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867251351980415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28815680595155885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849727031003785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14345773083827426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818002876064445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268293732690625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598160709949557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20359902949343936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6028170300098291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183585798130488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179503634472835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477674926029444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sorchablossoms,2020/03/18,Hey all!! I’ve a YouTube Channel dedicated to my Eating Disorder Recovery & would love if you could subscribe!! Really wanna help as many of you as possible!!!💕💕 Link to my channel is: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCvkTVWOnnJ4d0Is3K23xOaQ ❤️❤️❤️,5.653255813953488,9.200884558139538,5.875627906976748,68.25483720930234,75.51162790697674,9.021395348837208,29.53023255813953,9.3871,3.544082790697675,208,9,32,6,5,66,33,43,0.061,0.6809999999999999,0.258,0.8640000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,6,4,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,6,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3988753566399224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939267543102078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4219159131741936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37669517911045225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467538963698805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322572416398763,0.0,0.0,0.3732322672864689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23583743957786196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615133533207733,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mac0009,2020/03/18,"should i be concerned?? i’m not sure please shed light for me i don’t know if i’m posting this in the right place but i have been watching youtube videos about dissociative identity disorder (as trish has brought a lot of attention to it atm😂) i know i don’t have that disorder but soemthing i heard someone say was amnesia not remembering what is said and what has happened, i get major amnesia when i’m fighting with my boyfriend, i’ll be in that heated state and say stuff and then he’d respond and i won’t even remember what i said 2 seconds before, i want to know if this is a normal thing that people experience because of the heat of the moment or if it’s a bit more serious. when it happens i get very scared and usually start crying because i for the life of me sometimes can’t remember what i say. i believe i had no childhood trauma, i had a very strict and harsh mum and dad that probably has affected me emotionally but i wouldn’t say i’ve been traumatised, i’m just curious if anyone thinks my amnesia in the heated moments is a normal thing or not, thankyou!!’",3.22072708653354,4.993394700460833,4.718118279569893,82.70828853046598,74.34562211981567,8.32452636968766,30.027905785970308,8.998388855275968,2.6041911930363546,858,39,170,19,18,287,121,217,0.198,0.7809999999999999,0.021,-0.9894,0,0,0,0,3,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,1,10,0,22,1,0,1,1,37,40,20,0,9,13,2,0,0,0,3,1,7,0,0,16,8,0,0,8,1,0,1,9,4,0,1,9,9,23,1,14,25,4,16,0,0,1,0,12,5,0,7,8,112,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416991498380126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676056281662966,0.0,0.10243137385008108,0.13562287981372098,0.0,0.0,0.13141975355261334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13222772432388138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759233608182082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540714677197033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950741759423433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177511297832174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257833074660275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21289674713042764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19846701592819516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08502534784806062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233963423851113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358864513800056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345377670502763,0.0,0.1257676233723913,0.13213704027732695,0.0,0.0,0.11528723009063982,0.0,0.1297860221729016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4090886805082857,0.102800711189894,0.2290108738048161,0.3829122937045926,0.1205176863320844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199445700061507,0.0,0.1190552488068052,0.0,0.08520297193640873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780207540457814,0.0,0.0,0.11345324777288665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15994534327216142,0.07713227899684931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325774990535532,0.1986461254919944,0.07100106660143056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ragingbasketoffruit,2020/03/18,"I got made redundant, my vacation got cancelled and we're having to postpone wedding planning, all because of this damned virus. I work in the tourism industry, until yesterday I was a city manager for a tour company. We've been struggling for the last few weeks due to the coronavirus, then yesterday I got a call from one of the owners telling me that operations were being shut down everywhere in the hopes that they'll be able to bounce back after this is all over. I was meant to be going on vacation to the US next week, that's been cancelled and I've still not heard from the travel agent regarding getting the money back. My fiancé and I were booked in to see numerous venues over the next few weeks, before and after my vacation, and we've had to cancel all of those.

I have a long history of self harm and a suicide attempt, and I am already feeling urges. I don't know what to do to control these urges and I've already had my meds increased by my GP.",11.130165413533838,6.814221821052634,10.397819548872182,68.85973684210525,59.73684210526316,14.015037593984964,43.98496240601504,11.491704259439757,4.828180451127821,766,32,148,15,7,248,112,190,0.11699999999999999,0.848,0.035,-0.9359999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,1,0,1,4,3,4,1,1,14,0,18,0,0,2,3,18,30,10,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,8,8,0,1,3,2,1,3,2,3,0,1,14,3,17,1,28,12,6,28,0,0,1,0,8,8,1,1,17,103,25,4,0.1556584461079198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.343545931945108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393834736690491,0.0,0.0948879439779256,0.0,0.13245387285155755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15894467713379068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17458418321635824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870558736515919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132511352594922,0.0,0.08846428207342905,0.0,0.3734828370665128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15460395919517367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554581116086565,0.12688240903400508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775282651986867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14728778537108667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17290144294111878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3310890466846844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10547819155497508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403962838105675,0.0,0.1623857071362362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12430903613399663,0.0,0.0,0.16272800494404607,0.0,0.1702650756539381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605234282205692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18723794494886475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3745794488851308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332120264971125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beccylina,2020/03/18,"LIVID-19: Acknowledging my Mental Health during the Coronavirus I’m having a hard time dealing with this.

I am confused because I am not an expert, I don’t know which source to trust, so I have obsessively sought out facts, as if it were my job.

I am drained because I have watched the situation unfold, week after week.

I am scared because all the cases that first came to this country landed on my doorstep.

I am frustrated because Europe does not seem to be following the same actions as Asia and I don’t know if it’s an intentional strategy or not.

I am stressed because I have seen it coming but have not been getting information, updates, and a public response I needed to hear to be reassured.

I am angry at those that have displayed ignorance, lack of interest, even worse — were in denial or dismissive, thought/acted in a selfish way, and lacked humanity or compassion.

I am disappointed that apart from one friend, none of my close circle have asked after my parents, who reside in Asia (but it is not entirely their fault — I also blame the media).

I am worried that it may be a long time before I can be reunited with my parents again; they are old, and I want to be there for them but I can’t, and I know I should stay away from them since I’m in a country that seems to be letting it spiral out of control.

I felt isolated long before people started self-isolating.

I am anxious because I can’t even bring myself to go outside knowing how I feel.

If I can feel all this in the comfort of my own home, I can’t even begin to imagine how health workers have felt all this time waiting on the front lines.

I have felt many things, but I have not felt panicked at the thought of starvation, or myself dying from this.

The lack of certainty has not affected me much either, rather the lack of control over how others have behaved.

How do you feel?

Ps. Strangely, and I didn’t expect this outcome, but I feel better after writing this.

Pps. You don’t know me, so I’ll just quickly mention that I haven’t lost my sense of humour, it gets me through the day.

[https://medium.com/@thelovelylobster/livid-19-a104edea02ac](https://medium.com/@thelovelylobster/livid-19-a104edea02ac)",7.307285478547852,7.809308804455447,6.805693069306932,76.25114686468649,63.67821782178218,9.10957095709571,33.91254125412541,8.841846274778883,2.8031471947194717,1743,69,309,24,24,542,204,404,0.134,0.763,0.102,-0.8857,3,0,0,0,0,0,70.0,0,2,4,6,15,17,1,4,18,0,47,2,0,8,4,80,81,27,1,12,22,2,9,0,1,2,2,1,1,1,25,13,0,4,19,0,0,7,16,10,0,2,12,12,51,7,42,60,12,43,0,2,2,0,19,16,0,11,18,237,76,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07618199086607234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076203629101522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890582841350735,0.0,0.08950296425283655,0.0,0.0,0.34842957746884673,0.0,0.16212402762328065,0.0,0.0,0.08425260784900428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895578567149074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206085927775636,0.0,0.0,0.2136916824929512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06143691875241467,0.09821223324500396,0.0,0.0,0.0988682188994292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336551670302425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18876144507984388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926718569323517,0.0,0.3658706575431037,0.0,0.0,0.08103087631454588,0.0,0.0,0.07360015475369748,0.0,0.0995422381233331,0.0,0.05414030334401677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533716516130084,0.0,0.0,0.20252077140054345,0.10736861227425702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555681238246563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945340815490422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26177096888747275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741313285325856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686099664063508,0.0,0.0,0.1039910964930215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658198874081524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600295521124703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700294537948266,0.0706364967474738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09996276145962496,0.0,0.06455284724093056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115571427853759,0.0,0.0,0.06604354648017975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537513739000417,0.0,0.0,0.17344817962122322,0.0993803514484082,0.0,0.0,0.07880274922850536,0.10707989035970616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674278224366167,0.10153795499745533,0.0,0.0,0.10912373711432644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328867386086144,0.0,0.0,0.15125676743900845,0.16664631080117542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05618873617677055,0.07561553793777225,0.15282887446214344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674445997142003,0.09708139574419287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Imscaredofit,2020/03/18,"I can't stop lying, I'm the worst, I lied about DID For 4 years I lied that I have DID, I didnt even know what it was, it was just all because of an imaginary friend and the coping for loneliness, I started ""acting"" as I have a different name, age, and a personality, I then started to suspect it was DID and I went on with it, I can't stop, now I'm slowly convinced that I have DID as I'd go insane if I can't ""switch"", even feeling a presense of that ""Alter""

But it was just all me, I don't know what to think, even this post is confusing, I wanna come clean, but something is preventing me",5.868854166666665,3.575516093750004,7.203437500000002,81.4144791666667,67.75,10.408333333333333,32.27083333333333,8.841846274778883,2.2840427083333337,452,14,107,6,6,157,70,128,0.135,0.7709999999999999,0.094,-0.4037,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,6,0,18,0,0,0,2,23,29,9,0,2,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,11,5,0,3,5,0,0,4,5,2,0,0,10,1,16,2,12,19,3,14,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,8,79,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466791638328139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20727204004384006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513957357406959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4767799185589059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12166424162776357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18590171194412947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367493738363582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644759181080928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100993081545196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23044657482575626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18524033095910294,0.0,0.0,0.3406228605246813,0.0,0.0,0.4023366666646404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541789970090684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230563069594289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549508048628874
mentalhealth,HuMoROuSlY_BrOkEN,2020/03/18,"How do i get past my trauma from a toxic relationship. So that it cant affect my next relationship. I've been in a relationship for nearly three years. However, we broke up in feb 15 2020. I broke up because after everything I've done for her she's still unable to actually fight for our relationship. And i just grew tired in how easily she leaves the relationship. In just one fight regardless if its a petty fight there's always a probability that she'll break up with me. After breaking up I've realized that i already have enough reason to leave but i just cant use it as a reason because it happened a long time ago. She cheated on me somewhere the september-december of 2018 and even before that up until our break up i often get verbally abused about the things i tell her because im vulnerable. How she tells me that she feels dirty being with me, and how the guy she cheated me with was a better man than i am, regardless of me trying to work things out in our relationship(that was somehwere ber months of 2018 as well). she once told me to even kill myself (just once and out of anger). Anyway back to the story. After a week of our break up one of my female friends confessed her feelings to me, i actually like the girl due to her personality but i know i have a gf before so i didn't really entertained that feeling. At some point my ex knew about this and somehow i felt like she diverted the story of our breakup of me finding someone new that's why i left her. But the truth is she was being toxic and made me feel irrelevant for how she easily leaves our relationship and prioritize something else but then comes back for ""choosing me"" and also for the reason that i was verbally abused. Tho the girl and me aren't really in a relationship but our feelings are starting ti develop. i need an advice how to move on from the trauma my past relationship gave me and how i should stop thinking it's was my fault. because i honestly feel guilty for leaving her and for picking myself and making myself happy.",5.634735516372796,6.210878146095716,6.6238549118387935,75.85685037783378,67.28715365239294,9.676937027707806,29.73390428211587,9.692545771848811,2.6649722720403024,1612,55,306,33,25,539,185,397,0.151,0.77,0.079,-0.9799,1,0,1,0,5,1,29.0,8,0,0,2,27,21,7,0,22,0,21,1,0,15,1,67,42,33,1,5,10,1,7,2,2,2,1,0,0,5,16,19,0,1,17,1,0,3,4,12,1,3,13,7,65,9,57,25,2,49,1,2,0,0,49,21,0,4,23,229,81,1,0.0,0.16377299356212272,0.13488681353018328,0.0,0.0,0.06753551090651683,0.061263676420608724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762668832807432,0.05526889411602124,0.05750677526566346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628582525944943,0.0,0.16852029554570191,0.0,0.11761855544214353,0.0,0.0,0.061124005939822076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059533925156475286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072563859364354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057734262777488235,0.0,0.0,0.07141123887543709,0.0,0.09129573540677163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06211346844265681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20967082256983446,0.0,0.06635842146557241,0.0,0.06316717614514883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053395810660239365,0.0,0.07221640385563098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06843181100631245,0.06111557161300438,0.07357107926461612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746528908421871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646226109354687,0.0,0.037982183971863766,0.0,0.0,0.2927187950963613,0.07509046179954401,0.0,0.0,0.0675293288089275,0.0,0.0,0.06116200347534281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539550779702241,0.046132840639960884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05516459161913101,0.07345518853670803,0.0,0.051245721135406236,0.0,0.06674886389299968,0.0735014661243842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720418918018086,0.0936642489514038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319505741545096,0.0,0.060345990151169634,0.0,0.0,0.06533324125198628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451449624653557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854991823869454,0.21317614297383747,0.0,0.6678044485939988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585584291443567,0.053205844825705416,0.0,0.0,0.048917875948853926,0.0,0.0551929850887481,0.057780781710481136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081398363627725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182997122006534,0.04428422119402543,0.0,0.0,0.040299801400077634,0.07943415293530777,0.0,0.06603954068239447,0.0,0.046922556098460695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596906349047752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05543753047467705,0.0,0.0621400472530089,0.0,0.06236288976396352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050314407082543484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044505904499669166
mentalhealth,dumdumgrl,2020/03/18,"i desperately long for something, but i don’t know what it is does anybody else feel this way? i’ve felt this way literally for as long as i can remember and i’ve never been able fo figure out what it is i have wanted all this time. does anybody know why i might feel this way?",3.3480508474576283,3.918829864406781,4.762500000000003,87.18917372881359,72.38983050847456,7.933898305084746,24.91949152542373,8.07648339933343,1.1228949152542371,218,6,50,3,4,73,37,59,0.040999999999999995,0.9590000000000001,0.0,-0.2869,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,14,13,4,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,5,0,5,10,1,8,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,29,13,0,0.21410220926015144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.374724572265772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17885492284142007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21651302010705445,0.0,0.20557169659973848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23532994990576586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789474355832423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22712860973344776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16512882276395596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425360663604205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16482634077601213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484471998395225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628303021860132,0.5098331042195181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19319394238893475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,turkeyturkeyTB12,2020/03/18,"Severe OCD to BDD to Conversion disorder (or real illness) ?  Hi Reddit.

I really do not know what to do. I’m at the end of my options and do not have any solutions in sight. With what is at stake, I thought I would turn to Reddit in a last ditch effort. 

I just want to start off by saying I have tried to use all the appropriate channels, ie talk to a psychologists, a neurologist, and a general practitioner but not being the patient has led to either dead ends or not being able to interfere due to doctor patient confidentiality. 

My brother (who I’m beyond close to my whole life) has had various transitioning OCD throughout his life. It has gone through stages of being severe to being manageable. It has moved focus from one thing to another. Everything was under control until his wedding engagement fell through. After this he went into obsessive compulsive or a body dysphoric mode with extreme focus on tiny bumps on his skin. This led to life threatening depression and psychosis. My mom and I had to spend 18 hours a day making sure he was unharmed and away from the mirror for 5 months. It was scary (3 emergency visits over suicide attempts), exhausting, and emotionally draining. Suicidal thoughts filled his brain at all times over tiny or indivisible dots on his skin. During this time he tricked us for months that he was taking anti-depressant/anti-psychotics. Eventually all this stress and self-neglect led to me getting ill. My body was shaking, had pain in my stomach, nausea, numbness, headaches ect… Him caring about me snapped him out of his delusions. 

He then began extensively researching what could be going wrong with me. Putting all his focus and energy into investigating, he was convinced I had a life altering disease. Because of the symptoms I exhibited I had MRIs set up for MS, blood tests for Lyme disease as well as other things. After weeks of waiting and with all of my test coming back clean my family as well as my brother were relieved. But couple days after this, my brother started to exhibit the same MS symptoms I exhibited. He poured more hours looking into multiple sclerosis and now Parkinson’s. Day after day, he rapidly developed more and more symptoms. He says he knows he was obsessive in the past, and acknowledges the timing seems consequential but says he is rapidly developing unbearable health problems, including a tremor. His psychologists does not believe him, a neurologist (who does not know his background) says he sees a tremor that can’t be fake and that it is Parkinson’s. Our general practitioner (who knows his background) sees a slight tremor and is unsure what to think. He is in his early 30s and while early onset PD is possible (I’ve have read it is mostly slowly developed). He has gained 20 symptoms in a month and a half. He does not want a second opinion, a DAT Scan or meds to confirm diagnosis because he knows “100%” and the first neurologist in a 20 minute appointment confirmed it. After preventing countless suicide attempts over imaginary bumps on his face (which he now acknowledged as crazy) he says he does not want to seek help but live for a year without help and then “end it” before PD sets in.

Because of all the hospital visits and coming in contact with a sick doctor (possible corona virus) he is in isolation at his house (by himself). All phone calls revolve about Parkinson’s and his symptoms, and not wanting to live with them, and why won’t we believe him. I have noticed he is still going on dates and talking to people on Tinder, but he says it is just to keep his mind occupied so he doesn’t feel in as much pain.

So my question is: am I dismissing PD too fast? Could it be it? It seems he really is in pain. But He won’t accept any other option, couldn’t it just be stress? Conversion disorder? Lyme? Psychotic break? A little bit of discomfort mixed with OCD? 

My Mom and I are drained. 6 months of 18 hour days have had an impact on our health. We cannot continue doing what we have been doing. But it’s an impossible task to talk to someone who can only think about one thing.

How do we proceed? How do we help him? Any advice or guidance would mean the world. Thanks.

TLDR:

\- Sibling has severe OCD/BDD for 6 months, delusional, psychotic, suicidal, and refuses help.

\- Drains family to the point where I get sick.

\- My health problem snaps him out of it and he begins to investigate it unhealthy.

\- Begins to exhibit symptoms of what I was experiencing, and it grows rapidly and worsens.

\- His psychologists does not believe him, a neurologist (who does not know his background) sees a tremor and says it is Parkinson’s, and a general practitioner (who knows his background) sees a slight tremor and is unsure what to think.

\- The neurologist said it is impossible to fake a resting tremor.

\- He does not want to live with it and would rather die.

\- Should I believe he has it? - Is it stress/conversion disorder? - What do I do?

\- Family can’t go another 6 month at 18 hours a day but the consequences are too dire not too.

\- Advice? Thanks.",4.9414592785843885,7.075932813577587,5.613269056261345,76.56653130671508,70.54094827586206,8.763520871143376,30.63725045372051,9.345792617884785,3.015899568965517,3993,171,686,90,76,1293,379,928,0.165,0.774,0.061,-0.9989,0,1,0,0,0,2,146.0,8,0,1,6,22,28,1,6,41,0,79,32,8,8,8,151,131,60,6,15,33,5,3,0,0,6,24,8,1,0,49,53,0,6,20,2,1,18,21,18,2,5,22,19,68,10,115,92,18,116,0,1,7,0,101,42,0,13,52,454,117,7,0.04648014758816812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09083972456429046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482428269639004,0.09747697484983936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04366962869197991,0.0357403644470136,0.0,0.08500159966984426,0.0,0.03955118217289984,0.2094688384899187,0.0,0.0,0.05074428291359774,0.103257931542483,0.0,0.05188721661612288,0.047461427479561835,0.0,0.04738960820558815,0.0,0.0,0.08007706302734803,0.0,0.0,0.05213143780730086,0.07422123145024151,0.05142939923977168,0.0,0.17985509992618545,0.0,0.04003328300966175,0.0,0.04823905492759848,0.0,0.15981082796154092,0.09514880117796204,0.28472563265015194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228390997985767,0.123502844173211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04177335959502775,0.0,0.13145203955677034,0.0,0.023501759192750483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0395359897941014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048567917434945054,0.0,0.07924721702933234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482186701296006,0.0,0.0,0.12461865267555038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830943306464171,0.053631849772674274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04131369081014268,0.0,0.0,0.1788099148750915,0.037887523907016635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132121129116972,0.0,0.04658531865624666,0.12312846562839512,0.0,0.03903161764975896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031025859439363267,0.0,0.0,0.05063050684569752,0.051628965771241486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04693169906339482,0.10887397418868264,0.2226000621504092,0.04940104105919118,0.03416825655162948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05291795609747335,0.0,0.0,0.06299230184283416,0.03535024671646822,0.1483744623836369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04437056021123182,0.032223481941265016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04393876318221567,0.10479876527030677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895044792166193,0.0,0.04672538622901578,0.052068402780243835,0.0,0.04649272577621296,0.052904583754646906,0.05955274547436098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044213264203046165,0.2587401525704251,0.0,0.0,0.14815463929110126,0.0846275613840198,0.048488930877983887,0.1575280101798482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039382478217674835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579777538982423,0.0,0.03711910590476535,0.0,0.15972855606666134,0.0,0.0,0.20336694971293295,0.0,0.043806989031896434,0.2898640216485628,0.034947286460563144,0.11207694598401348,0.0,0.08558535018882599,0.0,0.0,0.09263803420312004,0.08934780536518915,0.0,0.07380009060427647,0.08130884352631904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031556969175347824,0.05055705346555451,0.0,0.0,0.055909894598939684,0.04014392399668793,0.0,0.0,0.13707597653300205,0.0,0.03728357075594568,0.0,0.0835824694461685,0.04308756247890395,0.04194110367383783,0.05189342488042534,0.0,0.04480520362705941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905448979815347,0.05081874481185331,0.0,0.02993169113528127
mentalhealth,Orange_Famta,2020/03/18,"I feel like I’m going insane I’m going through an awful breakup and everyone keeps saying it’ll get better but it’s only been getting worse and it’s not just since the breakup it’s been getting worse for years and no one seems to care. I sit alone all day and no one says anything to me and when I try to reach out it feels like they’re straining themselves to talk to me and it makes me feel so alone constantly. I wake up in the morning and I cry for hours because I woke up and have to keep living in this hell. No one on this miserable planet would give a shit if I killed myself right here and now and every time I tell someone that they give me the same bullshit response “everyone goes through this, it’s just a phase, it’ll get better, you’re not alone” but then when I try to tell them anything about what I’ve been doing to myself they don’t respond and they just tell me they’re unequipped to help me but I don’t want help I just want someone to care. It’s been so long since anyone actually cared. I spend my nights beating my head against a wall or slamming my fists into my head to hopefully kill myself from the trauma or I tie a noose up and stand on a stool and rock it back and forth to get the adrenaline rush just to feel something other than this overwhelming existential dread and emptiness. The only one keeping me from actually doing it is my cat who at this point is the only one who loves me and would be the only one who would care if I was gone. My life is a fucking joke and I wish it would just get to the god damn punchline already. People talk to me sometimes and then they say something and I just want to rip their arms off and slam their head into the pavement to get them to shut up. Sometimes I get a rock and pretend it’s my ex and I beat it with it until my knuckles bleed and imagine how I would beat her within an inch of her life if I got the chance and could get away with it. I want more than anything for her to kill herself. Every time I type the letter “i” into my keyboard the first autocomplete is “love you” and it makes me so irrationally angry and yet sad at the same time. If I could get away with it easily id love to saw her limbs off and use her as a living punching bag. I feel like I’m becoming more and more of a risk to myself and others physical safety and well-being day after day and I wish I could put myself in a mental hospital so I could maybe get help but I can’t afford it and no one would care for my cat. I feel like I’m in a fucking book about mental health awareness and the dangers it causes because I feel like my mind is becoming nothing but harm and pain and torture and new ways to hurt/kill myself and others. I want to die more than I want help. I feel like the whole world is just one big fucking joke to make me miserable so I have to see everyone else so fucking perfect around me and so god damn successful and all they have to do is say “oh I’m sad” on their fucking Instagram post and everyone flocks to their side and then I tell someone I wish I was dead and that I want to hurt myself or someone else and they write it off as a fucking joke and it makes me so fucking mad that I just beat myself over and over and over and over and over and over and over and over and I want this to end I just want to fall asleep and never fucking wake up because what I wake up to is worse every day and I’m going insane trying to handle all of it by myself and I tell people that I think I’m going crazy and they look at me like it’s a joke and I want to rip their eyes out and make them eat them and scream at them “FUCK YOU IS THIS FUCKING INSANE ENOUGH FOR YOU” and watch them bleed and make them beg for life and then kill myself and leave them crying, alone, blind, and covered in my fucking blown out brains.",3.1381813596491237,4.000897088750001,4.028934210526316,91.17513596491229,73.1125,6.7140350877192985,23.785087719298247,6.678205002080027,0.5379166666666664,2981,78,668,22,57,959,273,800,0.218,0.627,0.156,-0.9977,1,4,2,0,0,6,25.0,0,3,20,9,28,59,22,6,31,1,37,34,11,9,5,154,120,94,6,28,24,1,8,7,0,8,8,5,0,0,43,74,1,3,11,8,1,8,10,35,0,9,10,19,111,24,99,97,11,86,1,6,6,14,56,47,15,9,34,451,154,4,0.0,0.0,0.07989055224727991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695794046308588,0.045171231078966784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0286217157497064,0.0,0.10105456288002128,0.036439570811123694,0.0,0.0,0.07691690478421008,0.03147540168607825,0.0,0.07485820402122736,0.09041586159840394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724048624516687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045695420587729525,0.0,0.0,0.20867259988746328,0.0420500694745332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04423466557126219,0.0,0.13072855353756413,0.0,0.08992724634584758,0.105595108929925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042482600675601785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041885278532445634,0.06838951882944437,0.0,0.0362550083066259,0.04229533755828905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346493737299592,0.1564551860094944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655780118343172,0.17545777618189382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03481808814991008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.416266856956686,0.2352472068165781,0.07853445302524026,0.0930540031173998,0.0,0.032738328839349407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602900865670755,0.04351048878849477,0.0,0.0,0.10974768196211186,0.0,0.0,0.040656287949549605,0.040311337703924484,0.0,0.08764050288006615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091509586012912,0.18114779658494207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334275823813898,0.0,0.0,0.08673780904122748,0.13998658064371525,0.0,0.0722902144322901,0.03622493634710855,0.03437390365184816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083248113266464,0.0,0.16394092286734258,0.0,0.041123289940693836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250285592917947,0.0,0.0413312539669395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03157050573249373,0.03953391335096667,0.0,0.038413398436642286,0.0,0.03927688066479285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22190126310248792,0.1245273496583808,0.043556222548733314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0567563903456588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038695470573615366,0.0,0.03920306121088909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04114956081871488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03495705959915806,0.0,0.1302081251904573,0.0,0.0,0.032618769110880554,0.03726440020252565,0.0,0.0,0.04201773877413968,0.06772137224439284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13873158155757082,0.06302535013858161,0.08096872832804324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06580173330960506,0.17888879608191366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026228589692644216,0.0,0.0,0.07160611119160593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337365576631031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03535347645725331,0.0,0.0,0.24143690136591145,0.03249117602036363,0.0,0.0,0.03680421059545659,0.0,0.0,0.045700888008549566,0.14121481457990814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251444664728685,0.17446827436964968,0.0,0.0,0.02635988793632256
mentalhealth,gupta_aman98,2020/03/18,"I am confused People around me hate me for random reasons. I don't even speak much but they tend to bully me and tell me that it's normal and I should take the body shaming and all personal attacks as jokes only.

I never cared what other people said to me or about me, but now it's hitting me hard. I am a kind of a person who believes that one should take jokes and everything in the same amount of jokes he makes on others. Now I don't joke or even talk but I'm being cornered in group chats or whatever.

People sometimes ignore me/my messages for no reasons. Like I didn't even say anything bad earlier and neither I did something to hurt them. But they behave like I never existed or I don't deserve to be treated like a normal guy.

Even If I behave 1% same like those people, again I'm targeted.

What should I do? I tried not giving any fu*ks but this is too much right now.",2.978351648351648,4.279607934065936,4.2624175824175845,87.65758241758243,74.05494505494505,6.518681318681319,24.538461538461537,6.868970318607317,0.881731868131868,692,21,142,6,14,228,105,182,0.201,0.695,0.10400000000000001,-0.9595,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,3,0,11,18,2,2,5,0,14,1,1,3,3,33,25,16,0,6,11,0,1,4,0,3,0,3,0,3,11,6,0,1,2,5,0,0,9,7,0,1,3,4,23,11,14,16,7,12,0,1,0,0,17,6,0,7,10,102,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946044474442245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082567812022906,0.11710992157045175,0.0,0.14966035110852027,0.0,0.0,0.10984112938749606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821500557566933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14612555270399094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13412689152344873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3475576498072356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823121319478665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261974747457323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13025799781028302,0.0,0.0,0.11784550819737565,0.1298811975235225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408300398470445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13699204264686413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25708029744563554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781254458555611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19341295332782948,0.0,0.2029233258226636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577877107058398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914361139505961,0.10005186550809628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648087106433777,0.2297337374936731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705164665024893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123454095881204,0.1251368795017864,0.10461610132517772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127580604525717,0.13010912605564734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19782273277296727,0.1057371925019388,0.11498298367767967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893157454062172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fatty_god_76,2020/03/18,"I think I need help  Im 17 years old, I started to have panic attack and anxiety when my ex told me she's going to study abroad in a few months in September in 2018. Of course I was scared to lose her, I told her about my panic attack 2 weeks later, she thought I thought too much and threatened me if I keep having panic attack she's gonna break up with me, so I had to live with it. Afterwards long story short I broke up with her. Then I quit school in April in 2019, since then I've never really talked to anyone. Then it got worse, I started to have negative thoughts like killing/ harming myself, so I asked my mom for help, she just told me to ignore it and let it go away, sometimes she even got mad and said im troublesome because all she thinks about is work and money. And I returned to a different school last month. I don't like the students around me because I'm scared to talk to them. Last night I called my mom and told her I bought the wrong cable, then she was furious and kept yelling at me, at that moment I couldn't take it anymore so I screamed, she casually said ""Why the hell are you screaming?"", obviously there's no reason for me to scream but I have told her about my mental health issues a lot of times, and she doesn't listen. My teacher is probably the only person I can talk to and my good friends have disappeared. But I can't ask my teacher for help all the time. I don't know what to do anymore, my school grade's terrible and I have no talent whatsoever.",3.749339826839826,4.460407808441558,4.573506493506496,88.39573593073595,71.56493506493507,7.684848484848485,25.705627705627705,7.793537801064563,1.1706432900432904,1167,34,256,14,21,377,163,308,0.18600000000000005,0.738,0.076,-0.973,1,0,0,0,1,1,30.0,0,1,1,3,12,27,7,5,8,0,20,1,0,1,4,36,49,22,1,3,4,3,0,2,1,1,1,7,0,1,7,15,0,3,7,1,2,3,9,21,0,0,17,7,56,6,35,29,5,40,1,2,0,0,38,12,1,2,26,161,63,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633732314464427,0.0,0.1643122655446307,0.05792443852880747,0.0,0.0,0.07374616175785037,0.15489053234517988,0.2827312062098679,0.0778319609131891,0.0,0.0,0.10099835791637783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459004757125026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655134046826962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054715779669110745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06400284522211121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09416103720980766,0.0694832026125023,0.13251122560045914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805623866952791,0.0,0.0,0.1665799732208229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17896525434769925,0.08646460838129927,0.0,0.07363299539355019,0.09165142736089324,0.0,0.045527314069962126,0.13505314188164852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471065971902525,0.0,0.08094397530945675,0.0,0.07315022828707349,0.07331178595292903,0.0,0.09267802537865896,0.0,0.07042855934510725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348436635511339,0.0,0.0,0.1940450413097596,0.13224598617319272,0.0,0.060897756359596614,0.06142564215374299,0.06389218014101604,0.0,0.0,0.07774078101689975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692782197382251,0.0,0.0,0.06300440610829022,0.0,0.2915886220180887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07233367224250031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931674060380722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811173017117954,0.0,0.0,0.053070143906270684,0.08517447040067098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576017545543263,0.0,0.16587682938542642,0.2515189138758182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06852703202632186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193198772232173,0.0,0.11727074481070908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062286213904083725,0.1997536672598131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616249176917134,0.0,0.1972997918467567,0.09661064864819592,0.0,0.0,0.39579120988811894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645015102484303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747512273306246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060309323318210525,0.0,0.08442218044996644,0.0,0.09057376209337696,0.0,0.05334696639943511
mentalhealth,ravenn1313,2020/03/18,"Can a peaceful death be “traumatic”? I am desperate for help. There’s a lot behind this very brief story but it’s 2am and I don’t have the energy to write it all out. Still this will be wordy. 

A little over 5 years ago, one of my close friends died. Prior to his death, he was hit while crossing the street by a drunk driver and was in the hospital for a long while. I was there almost every night with him. He eventually got released and all seemed well. I was getting ready to leave for college and I did and he told me when I left how excited he was for summer and how much we were going to go to the beach. Little did I know, he was going to the doctor and ended up being diagnosed with late stage tracheal cancer. At 18. 

I found out after his diagnosis and took it as days went on. A few months later, I got a call from a mutual friend who said that everyone was at his hospice and they didn’t expect him to last the night. I booked an 8 hour bus ride in the middle of the night and ended up getting there around 9 am. 

No one was in the room because his dad was outside smoking and informing extended family. He was alive at the moment. I was there alone with him and he wasn’t really “with it” from multiple strokes. I talked to him and at one point thought he wasn’t breathing but it was “normal” for him. Well a few minutes later, he stopped breathing and I just knew. I knew because a second before, he had actually moved his eyes to lock with mine. And I swear I watched the light leave them. 

Obviously he passed at that moment. Now my question is, I have felt for awhile now depressed and extremely anxious to the point where I’ve had to be sedated multiple times for panic attacks out of nowhere. Recently, someone brought up that this could be a traumatic event and I might have a mild form of PTSD that I have never worked through. My nanny passed away this past weekend and it has only gotten worse since then. 

I don’t want to do anything in the past year. I can’t do laundry even though it’s a huge pile in my room. I can’t bring myself to walk my dog who I love more than myself. I can’t seem to even get up to bring myself food sometimes. Some days are fine but some days I don’t get out of bed. The only time I’m okay getting out of bed for is my job. I’m a paramedic and I know the stress from that isn’t much help but I love it and it doesn’t seem like stress to me. 

I need advice and guidance. I plan to see a psychiatrist but I’ve had such horrible experiences with psychologists that I don’t want to talk anymore. 

Please tell me someone knows what I’m going through or has some insight.",2.134180851063832,3.8694430981481496,3.44418439716312,90.83329787234044,77.27777777777777,6.521670606776991,22.78565799842396,7.378060373470096,0.7359842395587082,2043,61,447,26,47,666,257,540,0.132,0.759,0.109,-0.9397,1,1,0,0,0,0,43.0,1,0,2,2,19,15,1,3,31,1,52,11,3,2,4,76,92,35,3,6,7,1,2,1,2,2,4,1,4,0,22,35,2,1,14,4,0,16,14,5,2,4,34,7,56,10,71,49,12,91,0,1,3,2,42,35,0,11,40,298,78,5,0.0,0.0,0.08035753084022584,0.0,0.0,0.08046727116533821,0.07299450018148845,0.0,0.0824573300492463,0.08528531756366313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302720934831292,0.08166481370065777,0.0,0.0,0.06776349997800345,0.07330513691271083,0.0,0.09368012873114702,0.07736650172602004,0.0,0.0,0.10039435651348888,0.0,0.07007013101551186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408417293667668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574634595137999,0.0,0.0,0.15931850482424906,0.0,0.07092423617593213,0.08357915853345974,0.08546184243153489,0.0,0.0,0.08428431968687054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458677085668301,0.0,0.0,0.10877712478379696,0.0,0.06937980910098276,0.07868485121968398,0.0,0.08054990166597335,0.07762820332174006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906479158150209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957275492302103,0.09028781666282952,0.12724017684379246,0.0,0.21511116424662655,0.0,0.1871958501968553,0.0,0.13171876750695746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103891823230446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109393342850905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171540735423076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576513997264233,0.0671227411714897,0.0928895434356376,0.17438442638580168,0.08946885083786825,0.0,0.0,0.04022995265707623,0.16506406141656133,0.0,0.07287335880938547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07000737478799678,0.14864042985792206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735578140280922,0.0,0.0,0.06572755714673098,0.08752045398258727,0.12106713790136815,0.061058297824591275,0.0635100851521969,0.0,0.0,0.23182760134109334,0.08068130852746577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16739874514245548,0.12525524056526505,0.0,0.09661494397231817,0.0,0.0,0.1572165885530961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039085756855676,0.15568661788051266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625772405542496,0.0,0.0922460367589217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05275276803965067,0.0,0.08130645071361446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832962367060751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06561886658849664,0.22489331498786286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06811721919041433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13954249945625294,0.0,0.08144200910735515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576138742340078,0.0688446976654744,0.1886534567046528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237271905194367,0.07197377684224325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090423835014422,0.06537329269947274,0.09603288710314348,0.0,0.0,0.07868485121968398,0.09148910959346428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794383163951305,0.09713926216170507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480773585752884,0.07633529472867569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994865492079316,0.0,0.08391730971267243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605587009745862
mentalhealth,temporarybsacct,2020/03/18,"i'm an asshole i make every conversation so i can say a specific thing about myself that i thought of beforehand. i don't want  to be like this. i care about people and i want to listen but it's just like talking about myself is default mode for me. i don't want to talk about myself. no one likes me and they all pick up on how self centered i am. what the fuck. how did i end up this way. at my deepest level this is not who i am. how do you get out of default mode? just kidding, i know how. but it's too much work. i'm lazy. i only want to be alone and make my music and paintings. i don't want new friends, i want to occasionally message old friends who already know the sensitive person on the inside who is slowly disappearing. what path will i take? i don't want the emotional side of me to disappear but it's 70 percent gone already. i want it back. i'm so cold now. it's so fucking bad.

i'll be more coherent.

i haven't made new friends in years. i haven't been in love in years, i'm turning into something i don't want to be. i want to be in love again but no one's ever right for me. i can't feel that way again for anyone anyway. i think i just need the right person to break my shell. i know this could be considered unhealthy thinking.

don't tell me to go to therapy, i can't afford it. if you have the same problem, what do you do? what helps you? i need new ideas. i want to change. i do still care a little bit.",-0.4975204882301654,1.5697329096774233,1.8756320836966007,96.5380427201395,89.25806451612901,4.770706190061031,19.02353966870097,6.243973517019112,-0.1705222319093287,1102,33,262,11,37,373,143,310,0.21600000000000005,0.7170000000000001,0.067,-0.9905,2,1,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,4,1,1,22,14,2,0,9,0,31,4,0,8,2,49,70,16,0,16,9,0,1,3,3,1,0,2,0,4,20,6,0,0,8,0,0,4,13,4,0,2,5,4,45,10,33,57,6,37,0,0,0,4,25,17,2,1,16,174,65,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358916543269544,0.19943637978682416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06318414659133459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948382869656262,0.07544961228451531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865336058689672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842628898446752,0.0,0.09559242926213754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721477720153387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164659204896524,0.08003509571362445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173881211452685,0.07613500913323927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04569041852491211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20944347105402808,0.16707889873846865,0.047211114203964184,0.0,0.051355567091925715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06056864030962553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020092089082026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489839811572243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13244088673629242,0.09056780341689824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16311288012236988,0.08550397478122887,0.12063645885001505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642745035835823,0.13400653944634314,0.0,0.2618204231717543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948211218953444,0.0,0.12246507214381205,0.06872539005218636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626465603766591,0.15780356155499814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864655100962144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543395928762852,0.0,0.07186055285226126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426866846308343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695661119156908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216427800785323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794198389989764,0.1452612554661626,0.07898153984918209,0.0,0.10333835160728784,0.0,0.060033386144292225,0.11580235584171783,0.0,0.07173839624580028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09828936265077956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5862850142196528,0.14345242238782066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578558587955738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638205326784727
mentalhealth,lm112233,2020/03/18,"Could this be caused from mild OCD or something else? I was wondering if this could be symptoms of OCD or if its just caused by anxiety.. I often hear a voice in my head telling me I have to do something or else something bad will happen. Its been increasing a little recently but it has never been extreme to the point where it severely impacts my life. However, I'm not sure if its normal because I do suffer with my mental health, so I wanted to ask the wise people of reddit lol. For example, I'll hear a voice in my head telling me I need to go back upstairs to my room when I'm running really late for work already to make sure my lights are shut off and my door is closed, or else something bad will happen. Other examples are that I'll think I have to clean my kitchen counter off or else I'll die or if someone comes downstairs before the episode of the tv show I''m watching is over, the guy I like won't speak to me again or I'll fail an exam or whatever. I don't know if this is normal cause I've been told by some friends that they experience similar things. I just wanted to ask if anyone else can relate and if this is normal behavior because I feel like its slowly increasing and I don't want to go too crazy haha. I appreciate any responses to my post!",5.424512820512824,5.197508323076924,6.1469230769230805,81.86474358974361,67.69230769230771,9.394871794871797,31.179487179487186,9.029198982220553,2.3937487179487174,1004,36,208,16,15,330,142,260,0.126,0.769,0.105,-0.706,1,0,4,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,2,9,11,0,0,9,2,25,6,2,4,3,47,46,21,1,16,19,0,1,2,1,3,3,5,4,1,14,6,1,0,4,2,0,6,5,4,0,0,5,8,26,7,25,34,3,24,0,2,1,0,11,11,0,18,8,130,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664647409090974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571964224994366,0.0,0.07393060477966684,0.0,0.0,0.06757409515366844,0.0990208004487417,0.0,0.0,0.18069381140207705,0.0,0.0,0.07431147060276448,0.16138349743954464,0.11782371692409888,0.0,0.08223493399747958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29783281555225666,0.0,0.08324823217645891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543210021596874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029878451496617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40365852743662656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09453408679282174,0.0,0.0,0.04886492665609226,0.06904082065315492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466510617955395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984736407965752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569043660292624,0.17091980015979216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19836444694801875,0.1027255645778863,0.2178443472744471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05311172850686423,0.0,0.10901600100896956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826086193700383,0.09442846626743172,0.09686033120832804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450905796083442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739206212794843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165856576594894,0.07453600535596297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28406492119092697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699915818002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135760530303937,0.0,0.09255599530600757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191112154428064,0.0,0.09542197953823203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917756695837603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818841642388819,0.2975978829921454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18216724020627104,0.10044768735486936,0.0,0.0,0.1689381396150358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420442415641776,0.06192407300584168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923452468673102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17100526351227904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480375696155343,0.07035627890516928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FoxLynx64,2020/03/18,"Am I Insane??? I took a test online and it said I was bipolar.  I didn’t use to be bipolar.  My family has a personality trait to be skeptical of everything and I kind of am too.  Sometimes I do things I don’t want to do, does that mean I’m schizophrenic?  Please help.",-0.7721428571428568,1.3918989285714325,2.522142857142857,89.44785714285717,95.42857142857142,6.371428571428572,19.5,7.645422480735847,0.9582571428571436,204,7,46,5,8,73,38,56,0.098,0.7609999999999999,0.142,0.3094,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,10,3,0,1,0,5,16,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,1,8,1,5,10,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,31,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547270083521397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616048992004135,0.0,0.2744053298666687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19510550736000146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031161445400096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31707262159999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541607652327493,0.0,0.3195196079088502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768847571105074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878866239050177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933813307075282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234017821222921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514005886161149,0.0,0.0,0.171687158377286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Serious-disease,2020/03/18,"I'm dreading going back to our home, and my life. So I'm a 13-year-old boy that lives in Ontario. It's the end of my vacation with my mother and sister. So the house I'm going back to is dreadful. It's old, rotten, and it's from the 1800 hundreds. My father is a verbally abusive, lazy, stupid asshole. We are buying a new very nice farm but with this COVID stuff, it's getting difficult. 

So my mother is lovely, but she's left me uneducated. ( I can't go to public school because my sister went for a bit and got badly bullied.) I really try to do it myself, but I don't have the discipline or the structure for it. As for my social life, it's pretty much none existent since I have a lot of social anxiety, and there isn't much to do in my little town. It's really sad seeing posts on social media saying that it's so hard to live when being so isolated I've been like that for my entire life. I'm just dreading walking up to that old smelly house, and my depressing life.",3.4027731092436966,4.0740236470588265,5.363445378151262,82.56264705882357,72.33333333333333,7.985434173669468,25.35574229691877,8.192908349453996,1.4708036414565826,760,22,158,11,14,264,112,204,0.191,0.741,0.069,-0.9732,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,2,0,0,0,10,12,1,3,10,0,13,5,0,0,0,16,25,17,0,0,5,5,1,1,0,0,4,1,1,1,15,9,0,1,0,0,1,5,4,9,0,0,3,4,19,3,21,21,5,20,0,2,1,1,15,7,0,2,8,102,34,1,0.0,0.14495685590625787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935923226445401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18814895816345387,0.10215158124893564,0.07457936643697043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13356724407636447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537414218729292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835988860653917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06391934726281949,0.0,0.2085916239540176,0.0,0.09784914779754199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959560478460184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272034845017588,0.0,0.0,0.28233558373663153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292640030887615,0.0,0.3456588855693794,0.059770777664199484,0.12262017059003025,0.2160628268782985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040119353103844,0.11041964379973224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987286844770453,0.0,0.0,0.11815996318799366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3851362748246518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717110391810101,0.12446716321367142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567525568099042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729233697848624,0.0,0.12381799487145685,0.09749180464789653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120367771841404,0.0,0.0,0.3741408938557476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400538575232084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306309917376964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009460709336634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134135048094886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878510180726524
mentalhealth,lvldemonic,2020/03/18,"Unhealthy Dog Obsession Although the title might sound like a joke, it is not. About a month or so ago, I discovered a Shiba Inu rescue around my area. I saw one of the dogs on their website, and immediately fell in love with them. I grew up with 4 German Shepherds, Reddit, from the time I was small. My parents separated two years back, and my father kept the house and all of the pets, all of the dogs and cats. We rarely visit as he is not kind and the house brings bad memories about for my mother. My mother, she works two jobs, one in the daytime and one that begins two hours after I come home from school, that she doesn't come back from until 9/10pm. Needless to say, I get really lonely. When I embraced the idea of having a dog again, my loneliness melted away completely. It became apparent that I would finally have a friend to go outside with, in all my free time. Somebody to run around with, by cute clothes for, play with. I immediately applied to multiple of these Shiba rescues and every single day for the past month or so, I have been invested entirely in checking up on them, checking my email and my mother's email multiple times a day, making sure to comment on every photo on their social medias, etcetera. I would even go to shelters with my mother to see some dogs, to ease the compulsiveness a bit. It's starting to take a toll on me, and it fills my mind all the time. When I'm alone, I'm looking at photos of Shibas, watching videos, everything, and it's become so emotionally exhausting. I feel like I'm waiting for something that is never going to come. This is such an insignificant problem, I know, but it really does feel a little hopeless. I don't want every day to be disappointment. I don't want to think of them every moment, and yet I'm not sure how to stop. Any advice?",5.934846890597598,6.108361413597734,6.476195872116553,78.57106704438151,66.59206798866856,9.21672737083502,29.557399163631462,8.976282227363876,2.2659773101308507,1421,45,273,22,21,464,190,353,0.085,0.835,0.08,-0.6867,3,3,1,0,0,1,49.0,1,0,5,1,16,18,0,1,22,0,16,2,0,2,7,54,44,23,0,5,6,6,2,2,1,3,1,2,2,0,12,23,0,3,5,3,4,12,7,7,0,6,4,8,35,12,54,36,7,57,0,3,4,1,23,18,0,4,29,182,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652179927918828,0.08755808905866341,0.0,0.0,0.10230112422263504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717039580876567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17586140573063014,0.0,0.0,0.09280237595218188,0.1519037755724674,0.08247300981029328,0.0,0.109089241222536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078367314177882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552577820374956,0.10356372159396243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19110513531034964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643867928962773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110859458926163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523996435131713,0.0,0.3328888334892653,0.0,0.08877261240912296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09988722860580804,0.07056488884399542,0.0,0.10820319838194066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631332982778759,0.0,0.051605867372992636,0.0,0.16840834804878702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907939140941513,0.0,0.09727349084652544,0.22794620585032505,0.0,0.11150496645763504,0.0,0.0,0.09801895891878684,0.0,0.0,0.10285897586949867,0.054284163817048654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651296382100293,0.09899851190131988,0.0,0.0,0.08294613358642967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914830543985623,0.0,0.06593308801043526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047846792407523,0.0997346052854282,0.0,0.15768254561516495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07618137911833511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20079751486823236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967796242299126,0.0,0.09429192629448407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09451434734384484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655560489139744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854985467664173,0.0,0.09996558624814143,0.07871089671686253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068868646683653,0.0,0.07604183052461108,0.0,0.0,0.06991346241587247,0.0,0.0,0.08258033351037389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618856112315807,0.0,0.07426651688516415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329103980928706,0.0,0.0,0.23038601704598036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894665046549303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652012338327365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719093856859238,0.0,0.0,0.14033387012650947,0.0,0.0,0.06360786974428985
mentalhealth,Arisocrato,2020/03/18,"Anyone else get unexplained compulsions/tics? (anxiety) I've only been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder (selective mutism), so this could maybe stem from that or something else.

In middle school (a very stressful time for me), I started getting what I guess could be various tics or compulsions:

- I pulled out my hair (which I know can be a whole disorder itself, trichotillomania) until I had a bald spot on the crown of my head.  
- I made a small vocalization (almost compulsively, because I sort of wanted to make sure I was still able to speak)  
- constant unnecessary sniffling  

More recently, I get a compulsion to knock on wood whenever I think of something bad happening, and also to draw shapes/patterns with my hands that have to be even/a certain way.",9.33642857142857,9.112921320895527,8.87123667377399,65.55574626865672,59.67164179104478,13.030277185501067,40.03837953091684,12.28987398476788,5.243596162046909,603,28,98,18,7,193,97,134,0.111,0.8540000000000001,0.034,-0.8687,0,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,7,0,10,5,4,2,2,18,21,6,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,3,14,2,17,12,3,14,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,5,6,63,20,1,0.1563241318184056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15653603704207655,0.0,0.0,0.12501235173682573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391750659262312,0.0,0.0,0.10930546768453543,0.16017254657917804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052412040502046,0.09529373980836636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16893085133044236,0.0,0.2496241980932408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15866570319855788,0.0,0.0,0.358321996703067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611775061196128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10325061473805663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450187205035407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17220865533643018,0.0,0.1382369134986426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043365875880564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591165461816333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791767328595545,0.10434757186556302,0.0,0.1570486018029999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11889154648306342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15435122108689306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582083671473135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406919079597781,0.0,0.0,0.11064702509695833,0.0,0.12484065360229188,0.0,0.17906876483387446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733364421873868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016619157744486,0.0,0.0,0.0911538583886796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898378033767832,0.09220402316509176,0.12408281954805035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17453031051866028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AugustCrimson,2020/03/18,"I think I’m Bipolar but I’m Not Sure I just wanna preface this by saying that I know I should be speaking to a professional about this and I was planning on it but due to COVID-19, all my appointments got cancelled. 

When I was in highschool, I remember having days or weeks where I felt great and happy and motivated, but then suddenly I would feel depressed, unmotivated, and sometimes suicidal. After moving out for college, the depressive lows have become more frequent and they last longer. I’ve had days where I could barely drag myself out of bed, or I would skip classes because I know if I force myself to go, it would only increase my depressive state. 

I’ve been doing a lot of reading online about depression and I do have all the symptoms. But I also have some symptoms of Bipolar II. (Random days where I feel motivated. I’ve had days where I like plan on designing a board game, or create my own comic, and books, and then it would last a few days, sometimes weeks and it would suddenly stop). Similarity, I have days where my sex drive is very high and it’s led me to some dangerous sexual encounters. So I was just wanted to ask if anyone out there has Bipolar Disorder and how you found out you had it. I know self diagnosis can be very negative so I’m trying not to do that, however I’ve just been doing a lot of reading about symptoms and experiences. I’ve just been confused in general lately about whether I’m overreacting, or I actually need help. 

Thanks in advance!",5.185804195804195,6.430798384615388,6.160426573426572,76.36525524475528,68.65034965034964,9.216503496503496,31.43286713286713,9.516144504307137,2.9598760839160843,1182,49,216,25,20,392,149,286,0.163,0.725,0.11199999999999999,-0.945,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,2,1,5,19,12,1,1,7,0,30,7,0,4,3,67,48,30,1,12,17,0,3,1,0,6,6,2,1,1,10,16,0,1,11,5,0,6,3,7,0,0,12,5,31,5,27,27,10,43,0,5,0,1,9,16,0,12,21,157,41,9,0.0,0.0,0.09869661754470534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088044727169931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071841296273483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455087445480133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06165311019921552,0.1116995622277291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075088785676034,0.0,0.0,0.3913559158430958,0.0,0.34844187666364856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591351957622292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893289097940447,0.0,0.0,0.1022773610153678,0.0,0.0971088510856168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089317972992008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057479358311699015,0.0,0.08088972299274798,0.11150558826556184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766384767338573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779102589944425,0.1068584116470265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674927608745835,0.16488280425457005,0.11408866905825965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0494111778911137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17196872583100753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749425329199327,0.0,0.07499293974458142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692041084562326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202331802474984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11457024065401088,0.0,0.0,0.08042941982275023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055095460723332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20005718794229813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455634119694536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106291382476586,0.0,0.09532186921550972,0.3153649791103875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931147716123883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480548732769703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866642412652837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16689976149665434,0.05965412641418168,0.0,0.16225445911828304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592295556185393,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gorrigorrion,2020/03/18,"I'm a fucking mess. Can't stop cutting myself, can't see or talk to any of my friends, lack inspiration and drive, do shit at school, my parents have taken all of my previous outlets away because of the later, I stay up all night, and I'm considerring killing myself when my family goes on vacation This sucks, it really, really, fucking sucks. Each day there's always something that sets off a hurrican inside of me and I need to cut myself and numb it or I feel like I'll drop dead and cry till my throat is bleeding from the soreness. I have no idea what my mental health conditions may be but I'm 100% I'm not ok. I need help, I seriously need to get help. When I can't use the knife I lock myself in the bathroom and cut my face with the razor, and the worst part is that it works, as soon as I draw blood I'm fine until the next breeze of wind sends me spiralling down self-harm lane. I can't see a shrink because of the quarantine and now I'm stuck for a whole month with the same family I constantly disappoint and get bullied/tossed around by. I don't think it's ok to feel and be like this, to be such a burden to everything and everyone, is it? I'm a waste of space, a stupid, lazy, lonely, bitchy, overly-sensitive waste of human space",4.468430232558141,4.630273313953492,5.471618217054264,84.55417151162794,69.73643410852713,9.085658914728683,26.977713178294568,9.017664075816787,1.8040457364341087,977,28,213,17,16,323,146,258,0.27699999999999997,0.6709999999999999,0.051,-0.9957,1,3,1,0,0,3,31.0,0,0,0,1,7,24,10,0,16,2,15,10,4,1,2,34,39,20,2,4,4,1,2,2,1,1,4,0,0,1,10,15,0,1,5,0,0,2,7,17,0,0,2,4,25,7,31,33,8,28,0,2,2,2,7,10,5,3,15,127,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616562528069975,0.0,0.0,0.09493870588791367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242813450379917,0.0,0.0,0.1311669727435791,0.0,0.0,0.17020833992271786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086741177599175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335360547129498,0.09003606433283094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340209916449844,0.12547130084518038,0.0,0.26322132194355585,0.0,0.1411807107042246,0.19947297160631428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786133814775288,0.25813199385244145,0.1458795710706788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14839752361308986,0.0,0.0,0.18715354250123767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15760123322336614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445634587010984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641152141874546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069273699052492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143433533156348,0.0,0.0,0.31055425440674755,0.0,0.0,0.1484754401884432,0.13101331104944955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15501894385894285,0.15118262131510807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17887382092340512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412914614757511,0.22250012326415325,0.0,0.14564232546373512,0.0,0.14330632809514213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747760075596448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14880430259233446,0.0,0.11671912753927954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11221218773318414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894556201648882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057709539584235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558681319429628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163679900968448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fishsoup252,2020/03/18,"The fact that this sub is broken people helping broken people inspires faith in humanity. I’m not saying we’re all broken, I’m sure many of us are here to help others , look for resources and hear others’ stories. But i do think that this community banding together is something really special.",5.991666666666667,7.813558351851853,6.937962962962962,69.36583333333336,67.33333333333334,8.362962962962964,32.01851851851852,8.841846274778883,3.09794074074074,237,10,35,4,4,79,44,54,0.14,0.619,0.24,0.6801,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,3,8,9,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,6,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,4,4,9,1,1,1,0,1,0,7,1,0,0,0,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33822695397358543,0.0,0.40229242035319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25200278766458706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042474999776941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160938114492116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19224744932793306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386462333236521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23102647999080675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828343794072307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19228766642282769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3609752847907663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thr0wawaynewsprinter,2020/03/18,"My Temper Makes Me Feel Broken but Feels Good I posted this in another sub too, the following is mostly the same words on that post. I don't want to come across as edgy, because this shit ain't that deep. I have a temper and ways have, but I like having one and don't want it to get better. I like how anger makes me feel, immune and strong to others opinions, taking control of my emotions. Whenever I feel like I'm calming down I'll force myself to stay mad or get angrier, in situations where something small happens, like me dropping something, instantly I force myself to get pissed if I don't naturally. I'm even scared of going to anger management because I don't want to lose my hot headedness or be told that I can control it and it's not severe in me. Seriously what the hell is wrong with me bro, is this some type of condition?",5.525562130177517,5.550369159763316,6.292124260355031,80.05191420118345,67.46153846153847,9.363550295857989,29.91775147928994,9.120678840339163,2.3251178698224853,664,22,133,11,10,219,100,169,0.26899999999999996,0.56,0.171,-0.9734,0,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,5,4,20,8,1,4,0,13,3,2,5,0,29,33,11,0,4,6,1,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,6,0,2,4,0,0,4,6,12,0,1,1,5,20,8,18,31,3,18,1,1,0,0,2,9,3,6,4,84,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559198718916458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812864156077015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150881214077978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808773998082207,0.0,0.0,0.3335485992240987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672620751436294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821177074588196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007390238120836,0.10622787358582007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330612991272927,0.0,0.08450690326966867,0.1247184707398258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149066561579426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905798361798944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166351883071281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19851038818411607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075970913771927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28481777811912606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886982547058755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798324051688115,0.15263347592759208,0.0,0.16713962386312434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22894564400323855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15848928822298902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118002776816916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14208462642345068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263112827209161,0.11802732078518112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16257484791592233,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StomyKittyCat,2020/03/18,"Feeling fat lazy and lost.... Hello. I just need a little bit of advice.
For the the past year me and my partner (currently my carer) have been looking after his little brother and sister while his mum went to work. This was fine as it gave us something to do most days of the week and we got to see them. But she has changed there schools and because its closer to my sister in laws she has asked them to pick the kids up from the new school and mind them. No big deal.
But now im at a place were I feel like im just bored. Im 27 havent got a job (mental health reasosn) i did voulneteer but had to stop when she asked us to mind the kids which was fine. With this virus going around as well theres not much I can do at the moment.
Basically I feel fat (been over eating) lazy and tired as I have no bedtime routine anymore because whats the point if I dont have anything to do.
I know the easiest solution would be to just get out and do something and eat healthier but I have very ltitle motivation to do this. I would make an appintment with doctor as I have recently comenof medication (like a month and a half ago)but again with this virus going around I dont really want to take up any appointments of people who need it.
I dunno what the point of this post is. But some kind words could help?
Thanks
Xxxxx",2.561046628648107,4.0582622952029554,3.539552163703456,91.62577239181485,75.49446494464945,6.6984904394498495,22.65028513921503,7.348242739294969,0.6303564575645755,1026,28,228,12,22,329,154,271,0.07,0.8170000000000001,0.114,0.9209999999999999,2,0,2,0,0,0,26.0,3,0,3,3,11,9,0,0,16,0,28,8,2,3,0,48,50,22,0,7,10,4,3,2,1,2,6,0,0,3,12,17,4,1,5,0,0,3,6,2,1,1,12,5,28,7,34,34,4,35,0,1,2,0,25,16,0,4,17,151,40,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907570517867567,0.08987482084220548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894768209443376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055018504421576,0.0,0.0,0.08343412729755699,0.18051458755009134,0.18956919177375256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12361102251244055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069002328145024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725562877542552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095049693769198,0.0,0.0,0.065387218865012,0.10452712995409268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037754640805898,0.0,0.0,0.237653221120688,0.0,0.0,0.20749157057571727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15379527246231894,0.07243199127330344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052971326058142414,0.0,0.11524288444345945,0.0,0.16217935052380986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777127396023528,0.0,0.0,0.06795859934333262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285510557869793,0.0,0.10061247871756536,0.0,0.0,0.10558055946253253,0.05572048853598697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906663593984227,0.2032359001077517,0.0,0.0,0.08514083593852029,0.0,0.11067756528942996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676776359125544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213828466922803,0.10217579871449907,0.0,0.20474704000884167,0.0,0.08092736313380991,0.0,0.07453224079698173,0.15035663137006675,0.0,0.09792168107276797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678683116194273,0.07029004572517528,0.0,0.10592944198125707,0.0,0.19168987875457025,0.0,0.09710219230990996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495209316737524,0.0,0.1001089489349621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20522122515529687,0.08079353737400248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15610769874920105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476535702328777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07623156205655372,0.0,0.0,0.09334494312475207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653120871818227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24391585335268226,0.0,0.0,0.08365616150191563,0.05980158615937281,0.0,0.08132776892360716,0.0,0.09116047126599892,0.09398818980360038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381206265323344,0.0,0.0,0.14404701577330087,0.0,0.0,0.06529089383840032
mentalhealth,yeebuscreebus,2020/03/18,"LSD conditioned me like Pavlov. A few months ago I took some LSD and had a horrific experience. I was hearing repeating voices and getting stuck in thought loops. Two months later, about a month ago, I decided to try again. It went just as horribly.

I’ve learned my lesson and I don’t plan on touching that stuff again. The problem I have now is that every time I hear music, especially classical music, I have a momentary panic response that lasts one second or so.

I’ve boiled it down to two particular facets of music that seems to trigger this response reliably; repeated sounds like melodies and drums, as well as the sound of string instruments like violins.

I fucking love classical music! I’d really like to be able to listen to it without getting mild heart attacks every few seconds.",6.387534246575343,7.786267479452058,6.672493150684932,73.2283287671233,65.986301369863,10.223561643835618,35.14794520547945,10.355215969177356,3.977626849315069,636,30,106,16,10,205,98,146,0.124,0.768,0.10800000000000001,-0.5266,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,7,10,2,1,6,0,7,4,1,1,0,15,19,9,0,1,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,6,0,0,9,4,1,0,5,1,0,2,2,4,1,5,6,7,10,6,16,12,3,18,0,0,0,2,4,3,1,3,17,67,19,1,0.15236022459030418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701162924187885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333175090764946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25674012091986953,0.0,0.0,0.14903753528425795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085457253378542,0.1592038578241361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34344209263421865,0.18054759972539025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419391828938645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977420388904492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13751105123307308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648374329999486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324323129599497,0.0,0.0,0.17876189571245174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578815823513505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760586127906984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387030262171677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744160052915343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209569995224656,0.08884247220707614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16927781557952207,0.10344259130900917,0.0,0.2976676012364361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13699013963406792,0.1412394546269836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468698195177597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PandaPotatoGod,2020/03/18,"I have a question Why do I remember all the mistakes IV made right as I'm going to sleep, I dread sleeping because I don't want to think about these things, is there any way to prevent this?",6.232500000000003,4.769273250000001,6.370000000000001,85.01500000000003,66.5,9.0,35.0,7.1686216300943375,2.2005,150,6,33,1,2,48,33,40,0.183,0.7879999999999999,0.03,-0.6829999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,4,3,2,1,1,8,9,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,5,8,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965570472528923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17619604354268498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16426803914950874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734965471544721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237908439052808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.327425867823078,0.2468384998995265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5784972930675935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19202526977797976,0.18520510044181213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048322495347093,0.22942642318323564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260813557315868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Panda_with_issues,2020/03/18,"Help. I think my friend is depressed My friend is going through a very difficult time, and has confided in me that she constantly feels sad and like she doesn't deserve to be alive. She says she's suicidal. I would really like to help her and be a good friend, and would like some advice on what to say and do. I've already told her I will always be there for her, and that she should see a therapist. So, how should I proceed?",3.902068965517241,4.731915011494259,4.442011494252878,89.0416379310345,71.29885057471266,8.558620689655173,25.99425287356322,8.841846274778883,1.5933080459770117,334,10,74,6,6,106,56,87,0.13,0.6,0.26899999999999996,0.9113,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,10,0,0,3,0,13,0,0,1,0,14,18,8,1,4,0,0,1,3,3,5,0,2,0,0,3,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,4,15,7,7,9,1,6,0,2,1,0,16,2,0,1,6,51,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921725052649933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217017652374034,0.0,0.16363570696623114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125180794617698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16938176170942426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943649573725943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.455813833381837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117656128589957,0.16494790103232246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26363222480336274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882323711307596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598453317762798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127816197820538,0.0,0.0,0.15671144059365918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151125864916888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283357889544803,0.0,0.12601088843978506,0.0,0.0,0.11467320958679972,0.0,0.0,0.1879157173631536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16226393854763274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794012502578612,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,photoshopuser3,2020/03/18,"Strategies to avoid self harm and perfectionism? Hello, I just have a ton of stuff on my head but I really don't feel like writing an essay about why or how I've come to self harm in the first place. Recently, I've been having a lot of impulses to self harm. I recognize the triggers. One of the big ones being having my schedule not go according to plan (This one almost always gets to me) and the second one is feeling ugly or the feeling of not being perfect enough to do anything (not as bad as the first). I'm a major perfectionist and the coronavirus crap is further messing up my routine and mental health. It's ridiculous, I can't believe I'm doing this to myself. It's almost laughable. I've already cut myself several times these past few weeks. I've gotten to the point where even clapping my hands very hard or harming my feet by kicking stuff feels good because I just don't really like myself. I want to get better, this is really embarrassing and I don't want it to get worse... I'm 21 and right now my future looks like crap, this self-harm is bringing me even deeper into this negative spiral. I can't help but think of myself as a stupid loser. While I've only struggled with suicide ideation (which I'm coping with) I hadn't cut myself since I was 12 until now :(

​

TLDR: Strategies to avoid impulsive self harm? How to cope with perfectionism and negative outlooks on the future.",4.28303722943723,5.8654519600000015,5.264779220779221,80.6407878787879,71.2181818181818,7.5653679653679635,27.277056277056275,8.11559375814309,1.8658692640692642,1119,39,203,16,21,367,146,275,0.322,0.61,0.067,-0.9983,0,2,0,0,0,3,36.0,0,0,0,6,10,24,6,4,14,0,19,6,5,3,1,39,38,19,1,2,10,0,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,4,12,12,0,2,5,0,0,3,11,18,0,7,4,7,23,6,31,32,5,27,0,1,1,0,7,11,2,6,16,137,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20586098460925348,0.0,0.11343259419997301,0.0,0.08553047432719846,0.1113741721158141,0.12490250282884108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458836114211793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582631977137542,0.06266053323802759,0.0,0.0,0.11581043034051025,0.0,0.0909104222356392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854547718368777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062107396057716,0.0,0.1357851751783755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20789718340868865,0.07343402076009159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748682056959328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611124058193714,0.0,0.058418581485229625,0.08621634285163536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208068349777528,0.0,0.10549337897085996,0.10926218967908398,0.0,0.0,0.068898743597629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065569658555295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631868051576352,0.0,0.0,0.08738936305091882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358930621785822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786157840812792,0.07817730435497547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09812578729240602,0.0,0.0,0.10739487766124173,0.0,0.09717086530762553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975519355832934,0.0,0.10149386348667863,0.0,0.0,0.0877830836401961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.536167956266281,0.11612474537107507,0.0,0.08502990457614994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074596322260542,0.2353425568951099,0.11243683849626723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586442078238257,0.0,0.0,0.0599383483618601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481346698396618,0.12125777138843817,0.0,0.08245286325172878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275302809600257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475296734015656,0.0,0.0,0.12490250282884108,0.0
mentalhealth,themamiofpizza,2020/03/18,"Going Home (Coronavirus) I am international student in Florida and classes were canceled for the rest of the semester. I wanted to go home because I get really depressed when I'm alone and I don't think I can make it 2 months alone without having a breakdown or recurring to drugs daily again. My family doesnt want me to go home because they say that it is a waste of money and I could get coronavirus on my way home (bus, airport, and airplane). I have been in quarintine for a week and I dont have any symptoms. Should I go home and risk my physical health or stay here and risk my mental health?",3.941951447245565,5.382085529411764,5.23389355742297,81.08839402427641,71.85714285714286,8.650233426704013,29.188608776844074,9.150863307647796,2.504579084967321,474,19,92,10,9,158,76,119,0.14300000000000002,0.857,0.0,-0.9155,0,2,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,2,5,0,13,4,0,1,0,16,24,10,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,5,0,3,7,0,0,1,0,1,4,4,3,0,0,2,1,15,0,11,20,1,14,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,2,5,60,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27552140724744983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904529745847334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16216621557192784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619955623885613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11456336165106255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588951011121122,0.0,0.1542521236305206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253922271282584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898694964376762,0.0,0.30237598657365605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827718643576124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6671112746262203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878679159610693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13404518677856392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616920683027517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521113189051115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057767774501274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177349137636525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13825078470224075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522895758437238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569082872312306,0.1055790301863834,0.10669450215026152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282191806686822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonnnymouss,2020/03/18,"Hearing voices at night When i was younger, i used to hear a man screaming when I closed my eyes at night to fall asleep, and only during that time, and no i it was not hypnagogic as I was not falling asleep I would literally just close my eyes. I cant remember how long it went on for, maybe a few weeks. On another occasion I heard children laughing when I closed my eyes to sleep.  This stopped for about 8 years and then a few days ago when i closed my eyes to sleep I heard a mans voice say “hi” very clearly, then when i closed them again I heard the same thing in the same tone. Does anyone have ANY idea of this or experience with it.",3.7085606060606047,4.409500007575758,4.254242424242424,90.684696969697,71.65151515151516,7.684848484848485,25.272727272727273,7.793537801064563,0.9587818181818188,499,14,116,6,9,158,81,132,0.055,0.882,0.063,0.2351,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,0,6,0,6,8,8,2,1,22,13,13,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,9,0,3,7,9,0,1,2,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,7,13,18,1,15,5,4,30,0,0,4,0,11,10,0,1,17,73,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611844212250065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274381570962329,0.19650482472859693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103416054941128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085724155878305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399465654280018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18331277212122776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42242594755620577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21155134283999388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16584275263959036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882680906878946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3517236675825155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425258435816896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21228722024564192,0.0,0.0,0.1490276869689341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3750698840059455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15667446035178753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449997005158304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927421626585676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16185308912262125,0.0,0.1546242995804732,0.0,0.0,0.1503206587594552,0.0,0.0,0.17372131061602075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312330210186604,0.0,0.0,0.12067920099961205
mentalhealth,TheBeardedSmurf32,2020/03/18,"I never realized how much I needed my son until today. I don’t usually get overwhelmed like I did earlier. I tend to over think a lot of things, but I can usually work myself out of my own head. This coronavirus thing has had my head spinning over the last week and I’ll admit that some of it is self induced. 

I’m a recently single dad with split custody of my almost 3 year old son. His mother is great and he is very safe and well taken care of when he is with her, so I don’t ever worry about him being with her. I had a vacation planned for last week and I went even with everything virus related seeming to ramp up. I was gone 6 days and while I had a really great and enjoyable vacation, I spent my nights worrying about things at home, mostly worrying about whether or not I had everything at my house to keep me and my boy safe and taken care of. 

I got home late Sunday night and had to work Monday, so after work I finally got a chance to “stock up” and spent over $200 on stuff that we really did need, but it still didn’t make me feel prepared. I got my boy last night and for the most part we had a really good night together last night, and same with most of today. But for some reason my mind started to wander while I was making dinner and I suddenly just fell apart. I all of a sudden just turned my back to the stove and sunk down along the cabinet next to it. 

My son was just playing around in the living room, and I don’t know what lead him to come to me but he did, and when he saw me he just ran and gave me one of the most genuine snuggles I can remember. 

I never really thought about needing him. I’ve known for a long time that he made me a better man than I could have ever been on my own, but it wasn’t until today that I realized how much I need him and his selfless love. I got myself up off the ground and finished making him and I dinner and have spent the rest of the evening just loving on him. 

I still don’t know what I think I need to feel ready for whatever this virus has in store for the world, but I know that no matter what I’ll have this irreplaceable love on my side.",6.0947599591419825,4.472083044943823,6.776838610827376,82.50296986721146,66.86516853932585,10.427987742594484,28.99131767109295,9.339509955726095,2.048033707865168,1645,39,371,26,22,546,199,445,0.028999999999999998,0.802,0.16899999999999998,0.9966,0,0,0,0,1,0,29.0,2,0,0,6,24,16,0,1,19,0,32,7,2,9,5,94,77,39,0,6,14,5,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,19,32,2,3,16,1,4,6,10,1,1,1,31,3,64,15,59,44,16,74,0,1,1,3,32,23,0,10,46,264,83,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529810810219609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694053906915262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05782121768681775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665049068341797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333502579195313,0.0,0.0,0.06477484721636917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060038027690379275,0.0,0.0,0.0484953126333014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933272998440096,0.13603849233396548,0.0,0.0,0.1351629484492088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760428918581295,0.0,0.0,0.0823737351421843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039286898301844286,0.0,0.0,0.06307098468940896,0.2405650046855373,0.16580809879873964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154345941148417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15085579110515734,0.0,0.0,0.08676629096074105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683781619856276,0.0,0.0,0.123977555179926,0.2451796786448463,0.08482456173396571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036737053240865215,0.0,0.06639960098054885,0.0665462493888909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06392909971241206,0.2036024538227395,0.07115243980730998,0.1505820939702756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759267016423365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055568294384792,0.2787850581255985,0.11599185310787327,0.0,0.07997198615533042,0.352832585783642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890573725236039,0.0,0.05095487488450316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143013068958363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19269038316750586,0.07731419273415345,0.07424715197039758,0.0,0.08518260868017265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845577437164066,0.07844601114388572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053224240337052094,0.0,0.12010352642270375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860816308819824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498709938920348,0.0963653464608455,0.0,0.05969736417297927,0.04384749488092712,0.0,0.21383154689520248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179184625746519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16563592824386714,0.0620447203009604,0.0,0.0,0.12063567309266993,0.0,0.06761039283487953,0.06970760842074293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423113491952288,0.2290961002175681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04842387187834915
mentalhealth,BeaconXDR,2020/03/18,"""I Love You, Happy Birthday, Good Bye"" I don't know that this is the right sub for this, but I don't think anyone will tell me I'm wrong.

Four years ago, I moved across the country and five months ago, I started a new job. Since I left the old one, everyone that I spent four years getting to know and trying to be the best friend I could be to have stopped talking to me. 

In spite of having to go to my new work, I was very alone today. 

I reached out to my grandparents, and was expecting to hear from my mother at some point, but I never did. She's never been able to hold on to a phone for more than a few weeks and always just replaces it with a new phone and phone number, and she hasn't given me the new one since the last time she lost the phone. So I couldn't find her.

The reason this is important is today is my dad's birthday and the day he died. 

I was 12, and saw him hours before and then went to spend the weekend with my grandparents in another state. 

I have always taken comfort in fact that the last words I ever said to him were ""I Love you, happy birthday, goodbye.""

You can't beat that.

But 19 years later, today was still really rough.  

​

​

Thanks for listening.",4.0418269230769255,4.445126368421054,4.5715156882591135,89.78294154858301,70.7408906882591,7.470546558704452,24.34438259109311,7.1686216300943375,0.7608868421052635,931,22,206,8,16,296,137,247,0.08199999999999999,0.765,0.153,0.9565,3,1,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,3,0,4,4,12,1,0,15,0,23,2,0,1,4,32,42,14,1,3,4,2,1,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,8,12,0,2,5,1,2,3,7,3,0,5,14,5,33,9,27,23,4,43,0,1,1,2,25,10,0,1,30,134,41,2,0.09924383801094068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759473487323284,0.0,0.0,0.1027866858038072,0.0,0.0,0.1651576469664109,0.2150613140424333,0.24118425192536355,0.0,0.10406581738411458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06939359907141934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444919649325015,0.0,0.1041502851342498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923812910713922,0.0,0.0,0.06400406527918609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299943527404223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977173329785006,0.0,0.0948317402206973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070706998827943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667554306226831,0.0,0.05185080922235941,0.0,0.056402560216762036,0.08324102273157499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21129382198863095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118550182607762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977351892919774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848419565043684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908363584045196,0.16179394775505251,0.0,0.0,0.107828720382438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083363727145234,0.0,0.17914287708601526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921548465888888,0.10548049373445258,0.0,0.0,0.15308593212516192,0.3834012687138583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041397133819977,0.0,0.13450038617385773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381750536366484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357814391351846,0.1020391945131267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08475369540222512,0.09440361655863176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16419105672034878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024529934937475,0.0,0.07925625723402899,0.08297229242204489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976843770342512,0.08674348877079142,0.09137039221032556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359144410686789,0.0,0.0,0.05786988004198345,0.0,0.2822146624709403,0.0,0.0,0.06738005147280772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188656001455644,0.0,0.0,0.07960742055635002,0.0,0.0,0.09200003211760806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225069606037081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850755730626704,0.24118425192536355,0.1917293335260108
mentalhealth,ostomyass,2020/03/18,"Has anyone had any success with overcoming mental illness or improving mental health? Can anyone who has any success in in improving your mental health offer suggestions or advice that you think could be beneficial? 

I’m trying to avoid the medication route as I’ve not really had much success with it and I’m looking for more natural therapies. I’ve heard that it’s possible to form new/permanent connections or pathways and you can essentially re-wire the brain. I’ve heard of cognitive and dialectical behavioral therapy, so maybe if you know of any specific techniques or resources such as websites or apps that are effective. Maybe hypnosis or meditation would help. 

I’m really struggling and it has become so debilitating. It is affecting so many aspects of my life and I’ve finally reached a breaking point where, out of necessity, I am ready to fight back after years of this.

If this is of any help, I’m a 32 year old. I have experienced some trauma (physical), have had a few major surgeries for medical conditions which were permanently life-changing. As far as mental health goes, I have been diagnosed with a few different things. 

Any help would be greatly appreciated and I’d like to thank you in advance. I hope y’all are staying safe with current health scares and are doing great in general. You all rock 🤟🏻",6.175817263544534,8.069068243801656,7.012011019283751,68.73599632690544,66.97520661157026,11.162901744719925,34.93204775022957,11.095144083064902,4.593737557392104,1073,52,175,35,18,356,144,242,0.059000000000000004,0.7290000000000001,0.212,0.9903,2,1,0,0,1,0,24.0,0,7,0,5,6,14,1,3,6,0,25,10,1,2,1,34,36,22,0,6,9,0,0,1,0,2,9,2,0,0,12,12,0,2,3,1,0,1,1,5,0,0,7,4,12,9,26,24,8,18,0,0,1,0,16,8,0,10,8,110,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778082874156054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34023282917063885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13993335803831636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694260351221248,0.0,0.0,0.11051220028207168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170388431168388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585384428952352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989250910032718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156227828494196,0.0,0.10454499018077866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961459990680994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206405765109599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4254510008628707,0.0,0.0,0.20121122989504486,0.0,0.0,0.09938556702722426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05499224595078736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413555240615942,0.04888593901686991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402808219032082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144861559369928,0.20105433599114805,0.0,0.0,0.20160676329656047,0.40336162160508937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355813677986313,0.0,0.0,0.09664188722951284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499974056463554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459228764604023,0.11280648602110728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282063950380433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018095274720594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665430582870218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460802638408656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921249652587544,0.2288625127451705,0.0,0.06647769868536815,0.06411660755065893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679365027434348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216438383820418,0.0,0.0,0.12887514042484188
mentalhealth,i-wanna-death,2020/03/18,im so desperate for answers i so badly am chasing this feeling i felt today it was nothing at all just nothingness i wasn’t thinking or anything it i just knew i was something. i feel like suicide will set me free and it was a message i always want to prove something is real i want to know we are real and it’s not just a simulation or sum shit and i can’t seem to wrap my brain around this i just feel like it’s the key to open the door to all the answers i’ve had suicidal urges for a while like i wanted it i don’t know why there was just something telling me to do it and then there’s something telling me not to do it. homicidal though are frequent too it’s always the same though i’m on top choking them they are staring me in the eyes and as the life leave their body i feel a way i can’t comprehend i’m stuck battling this constant battle in my head like there’s 2 different thought process (idk the right word) like the urge to cut my eyelids off will pop into my head and then another one will saying don’t or like the urge to cut open my arm and cut the main vein out in one big piece and there there is the thought that says don’t. i feel like i am fighting a battle in my head i always feel like a made a bad choice or i’ll just randomly get déjà vu and i don’t know why i feel like only way to set myself free is suicide. i don’t know what this post it supposed to i’m so desperate for answers i spend all day just in my head,0.9291134558903488,2.5820334353312333,2.632093984553464,95.66113564668771,80.57728706624606,5.634243446100293,22.918416186228647,6.48374012150746,0.3326689655172417,1137,38,270,10,29,375,137,317,0.161,0.73,0.109,-0.9636,1,0,4,0,2,2,6.0,1,0,3,1,19,21,8,0,18,0,26,11,10,1,4,61,52,22,3,3,13,0,8,9,0,3,1,2,1,0,16,15,0,0,21,0,3,0,11,10,0,2,12,12,37,13,26,37,6,28,0,0,2,0,10,16,1,6,16,168,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20917898444572444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786910524887967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895829671167754,0.07459764302844082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139935015752869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930802588864195,0.0,0.09354585131385074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09055545162349077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05404252894698788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755067173645432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965941420845221,0.2993251627016387,0.0804588511380608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04378079495577533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34400211234582445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051580339977908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842119097227843,0.0,0.0,0.08872957433213521,0.0,0.0,0.05918873330922402,0.3684535349607875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929132897876917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040607114418795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356686456517202,0.06373186189022008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025495088815061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19076006186061487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715627049181897,0.0,0.13327845287622278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628620101991929,0.0,0.0,0.08601704707725924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580459904837953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749829680701069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648561719977754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05369412777040828,0.16466146155946834,0.13305189125275185,0.0,0.0,0.0794303403454279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14827801245526034,0.13302929185990486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122862639706566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cuntsneed69,2020/03/18,"Is it always textbook bollocks? Mental health has come along way the help is there now but all these people telling g us how to feel what to expect how this will help I'm sometimes sit and wonder do you actually know why your talking about or is this what the pills said? Have you actually experienced this yourself and know it I'll get better or is it all bollocks? 

Starting to think it's all bollocks",4.470295358649789,6.066892759493673,4.780443037974685,84.2404535864979,70.77215189873421,6.785654008438819,28.356540084388186,7.1686216300943375,1.4650742616033745,324,12,62,3,6,102,55,79,0.0,0.88,0.12,0.8686,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,3,0,1,5,1,0,0,2,0,8,2,0,2,3,18,18,7,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,10,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,5,16,3,5,0,0,0,0,9,0,0,3,2,41,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.431508676201092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183966629635946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19553830501969946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904515686967213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179098573740864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551167980098258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350109354592061,0.0,0.0,0.29638721743359675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24301325675927235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22280918796641414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327766660194495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21030954948477468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21866608623743355,0.0,0.1564903739722178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17770573636967024,0.1932445462276595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166711455270808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659469947942483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17549289569770285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19950154727393654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397653307079128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the_one_d0nut,2020/03/18,Is it possible to become more emotional? I went through a lot last year because my dad was in the hospital for a long time (hes fine now and at home) and I realized that I became kinds unemotional over the course of the time. I remember times where I felt very sad about some movie endings but now I just feel next to nothing. I actually want to become more emotional because I think it makes life a lot more interesting so I want to go back to being more emotional. Is this even possible? Any advice is greatly appreciated,3.4460784313725483,5.5691224313725485,5.141764705882356,78.38460784313726,74.68627450980392,9.239215686274509,28.98039215686275,9.725611199111238,3.020521568627451,416,18,80,12,9,141,70,102,0.048,0.787,0.165,0.917,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,6,0,6,1,0,1,0,15,14,4,0,2,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,2,11,4,12,10,7,17,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,3,11,55,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.14195028708231305,0.0,0.0,0.1421441416033682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891939773914016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185158143707914,0.0,0.1773450176918574,0.32130351210897057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4908767528348149,0.1288364817248441,0.0,0.0,0.09607652157549276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355014345641916,0.0,0.1396666839529029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266961539950482,0.0,0.0,0.1603727732453362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14591061446895445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15147667097337195,0.0,0.1185712437828556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274437170979583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872961744198366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24733380543496294,0.0,0.0,0.0970972595671806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547008776360864,0.0,0.0,0.13957506436575984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32797392554614874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16478050572057312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320641131910083,0.0,0.0,0.2544608280847769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002168690172407,0.17159494582075374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348450716186545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367299523570354
mentalhealth,AyyLMAOdazdank,2020/03/18,"[US] What is an ""ART"" appointment? I have an appointment card listed as ""ART"" I really should have asked what it meant when I was there. All I heard from the intake evaluater was that the 'A' stood for adult. I can find literally no information about it because search engines think I mean art therapy as in drawing. Thank you for the info.",2.5701785714285705,5.217472625000003,3.8319642857142884,83.87375000000002,80.5625,8.032142857142857,23.205357142857146,8.841846274778883,1.9882169642857144,264,9,51,7,7,86,47,64,0.036000000000000004,0.9229999999999999,0.040999999999999995,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,0,7,0,0,0,1,9,14,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,8,1,7,8,1,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33710342076651545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198126084913761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295731642182852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3927887412314732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23100349363518505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33198326525720423,0.4123666373317311,0.0,0.0,0.2310518182785392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4337459466647241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,divergedinayellowwd,2020/03/18,"I've tried telling people that I need professional help, but nobody will listen. The title says everything.  I need help and can't get it.",2.8302564102564105,5.661571769230772,3.674615384615386,84.15371794871797,81.30769230769229,6.5435897435897425,20.2051282051282,7.793537801064563,1.0436820512820508,110,3,20,2,3,35,22,26,0.0,0.787,0.213,0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,6,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,9,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3300487767693597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19186608277428194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4923022026112882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.544602901736817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545957735041734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.292041461300651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32098116974902896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493296966258771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,isuccfrogs,2020/03/18,"just vibin hi reddit! im just using this as an out, bc i have no one to talk to and im on the brink of killing myself lol. i have been nearly brain dead for the past couple of weeks, each day going by like a blur, i can hardly remember what happened or what the fuck i even did. work is work. i feel like im drowning constantly and i can breathe but it’s like through a straw, and the straw has fucking holes in it. idk what to do, i cant go to therapy, i cant talk to my mom about it bc she doesn’t care or will somehow turn it back onto me and guilt trip me about being depressed, and whenever i try to talk to my friends/partner about it, it just somehow turns into me consoling them about their issues. but hey whatever right?? lmao my life is just one big fucking joke to the world, and im even laughing at it.",-0.1703409090909105,1.8841990113636369,1.8545000000000016,97.44050000000004,87.29545454545455,4.883636363636365,19.595454545454547,6.2581,-0.11216272727272658,630,19,149,6,20,209,107,176,0.09699999999999999,0.7609999999999999,0.14300000000000002,0.8908,0,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,2,2,13,12,4,1,8,1,15,6,2,1,0,23,26,11,3,0,8,1,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,11,9,0,0,2,1,0,3,4,6,0,2,2,2,19,6,25,22,1,19,0,1,0,3,9,11,3,5,8,101,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530749944445173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383657090611591,0.0,0.0,0.12637210413516856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394254365380487,0.0,0.0,0.13714486450578414,0.0,0.07993548331844652,0.0,0.10675526557261313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373148969435347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06267126639202097,0.08854767538135985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437606781479205,0.0,0.0,0.1408837357957895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960581607820576,0.0,0.11103205825937637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.53553559640529,0.1293683396428069,0.0,0.0,0.1371288577551285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754734643747941,0.18166255337144835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451650870808365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797922645112556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832132123194801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14040765231607003,0.10584995774017524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988714198184334,0.0,0.0,0.14174405862711725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415179499937513,0.2696372250050783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10705030777413192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942271026300027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804696087502448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HappyMunchMunch,2020/03/18,"I am so desperately worried about my dogs. Because of this coronavirus thing and the panic buyers among us.

I am terrified that there is going to be a food shortage and that I am going to struggle to buy food for them. I don't give a crap about myself because I can understand, but they can't.

The catastrophic thinking has gripped me like never before with this and I am terrified.",4.149504504504507,6.034748364864867,5.325405405405405,78.84909909909912,72.1081081081081,8.176576576576577,29.90090090090089,8.841846274778883,2.604160360360361,305,13,55,6,6,101,52,74,0.214,0.6809999999999999,0.105,-0.7718,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,2,0,4,4,1,2,4,0,10,3,1,0,1,8,15,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,2,0,2,0,1,2,3,3,0,0,0,1,12,1,9,14,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,2,47,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874568939490137,0.0,0.2006302238474253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5702088413360618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226180318808664,0.2679968253519457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518951498997085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18184699266272988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766353873647177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464869871699261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664082603741056,0.15107740743230974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24545383920038802,0.2836126267891221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394446146522585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SheSeesTheMoonlight,2020/03/18,"Now that I'm functioning well, I feel invisible My whole life I've dealt with mental illness, and have had a feeling of alienation, of ""differentness"", and I strived to work on myself and my world view in order to feel accepted and normal. Now I work in customer service, I have friends, and everything I thought would make me happy, and while it has brought me great joy I would never give back, it's also made me feel a little empty. Like, all that struggle, everything I've been through, is just overlooked. New people I meet don't see it, and I don't show it. Now, I'm not cured, and I still struggle every day. It's just invisible, because I made it that way. Life just feels a bit... shallow now. Superficial. I have a lot of fun and people (for the most part) like me, but I feel like I'm carrying some secret around with me. If I open up to people, most of them are shocked, or run away, or judge me. It makes me not want to be friends with them. After all this time trying to be accepted, I've learned I don't want to be accepted by the people who judge me anyways. Because they only act like they accept me. People don't know me, and it feels a lonely. Is there anyone here that relates to what I'm saying?",3.8220014347202285,4.646171735772358,4.827513151602107,86.22540172166426,71.47967479674797,7.576853180296509,27.47871831659493,7.724431198458867,1.4516368244858922,941,32,199,11,17,308,128,246,0.073,0.7659999999999999,0.161,0.9708,1,2,0,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,4,2,15,19,0,2,7,0,18,3,0,4,3,55,40,16,0,6,9,0,7,4,2,2,3,1,0,0,15,15,0,0,15,1,0,3,7,4,1,0,6,10,31,15,24,29,9,26,0,1,2,0,11,9,0,7,16,135,46,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136210095147984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988312382256776,0.0,0.0,0.10170273412683446,0.0,0.0,0.10733742663538152,0.08784775281264677,0.0,0.13928601702884955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472651835035314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736789090097897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936225232804762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625677784586847,0.0,0.20535301330227132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4043617727238156,0.08161702221103675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17653161048188093,0.0,0.0,0.10959471280852988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12595608896115798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12161648027139985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278634993330147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16138997862860333,0.22325836094623328,0.11450402426868075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097127455521425,0.0,0.2162037464539361,0.15251954326710013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151326131797972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811318792430367,0.1103390349838944,0.0,0.0,0.11193635283629284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688886594926326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237167648572529,0.0,0.39601729307149947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085262286731012,0.0,0.0,0.09103888790632507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123661973236408,0.0,0.0,0.23886844542632304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906981814156786,0.06661748136500502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756520870799098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476993521849248,0.09068277596887868,0.0,0.0,0.102720442684114,0.0,0.0,0.1275510429742744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634419822258287,0.0,0.0,0.16231347888037798,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThatOneBirdTM,2020/03/18,"Very confused about my mental state, looking for attention(?) Hello! I'm not sure how to go about this, nor what I'm hoping to gain here exactly. I was hoping to talk about this in therapy, but my upcoming appointment was canceled. 

I've been in therapy for over a year now, and would just like to say first and foremost I don't think I have any severe mental health issues. I've mentioned lightly about a diagnosis, and he had said if it was necessary he would've/would mention anything. I trust him, and so far we haven't talked about ""what's wrong"" but we've just been talking. Part of me believes it is, truly, better not knowing if I have any sort of illness.

​

I'm going to do my best to explain this, but I'm not sure how well I can. 

At one point, around age 14-15, I had felt like I was trying to give myself a mental illness, or that I was craving a mental illness diagnosis (I struggled with addictive behavior around this time, and feel a lot of shame about this time still). My sadness felt fake (not like a lie, but forced), crying felt fake, or dishonest, or it felt like I was making myself fit a description of depression, or general despair, I would research whatever I could to try to better understand the situation. It felt like I was constantly trying to find reasons to ""prove"" I had an illness, and I definitely found things which I think have had a major impact in my life from the past, but it still felt like I was acting like these things hurt me/caused sadness, when, in reality, they didn't. I think a lot of the feeling was a disconnection, sometimes a nothingness, apathy? It was a really odd time. Upon learning about anxiety, I read, and read about anxiety, and it felt like ""that's it"". Although, I still don't feel like the feeling was anxiety. It's like I saw how many people were struggling with anxiety, and just how much attention they were given, and it's like I craved that, and I tried to prove to myself it was anxiety, which I feel terrible about (I kept most of this to myself, although I thought and though, I tried not to involve others because it felt wrong). After time, going into therapy, and starting to take classes in public school (previously home-schooled) the feeling slowly went away. At one point towards the end of 2019, the best feeling, I just felt genuine. Sadness felt genuine, happiness felt genuine, I wasn't forcing emotions, and I didn't feel like I was craving to be diagnosed with something. I felt content, and connected. At this time, in therapy, I felt like we were making really good progress and some repressed things were starting to surface, and dealing with the feelings felt really good.  

​

  But, things started to go downhill. A few weeks of not feeling like myself, trouble thinking, going into a lot of weird and bizarre thoughts, feeling insane, a mix of varying feelings, ended up landing me back to feeling very similarly to before. I feel like a lot of this sounds really disorganized, all over the place, I really don't know how to explain this. I do still feel better than before though, there are much more good days and much more mental clarity. It's almost entirely been internal. 

  For awhile I've gotten back into that mindset, I've been looking at a lot of articles trying to ""figure out"" what's wrong. A thought I had before I've been thinking again, not sure about its legitimacy, but it's like; I want to be diagnosed with something, because if there's nothing wrong with me, that means I'm ""broken"". Or, it's just my personality, or my mentality, which was really distressing. For awhile, I really think it would make a lot of sense if the problem was from anxiety, I think a lot of the things that have been a huge struggle for me have been anxiety related, but I really don't believe it is anxiety. It doesn't feel like it, in my gut. It feels like something in my control. 

​

  Right now I've been really thinking that I may have OCD. I've done research, and it feels to me that I'm struggling with, if anything, moderate OCD. Mostly Pure O OCD? There's been a lot of awful thinking, intrusive thinking, and now I'm learning about intrusive feelings? Some thoughts are almost leading me to believe like they aren't intrusive thoughts, but actually my thoughts. My whole state hasn't been necessarily painful, sorrowful, or unbearable, there's just been a lot of overthinking, stress, distress, and frustration. But what I feel that's ""bad"" still ""feels"" like I have control over it. I feel like if someone else decided I had an illness, I could just relax. I would trust what someone else said.

I feel like upon seeing others talk about their struggles, the awful things they experienced and how much I feel sympathy for them, it feels as if I'm trying to find things in my life as to bring sympathy out of others, which also, is really upsetting. Partially feels like I'm trying to compete with others sufferings, saying, ""hey, I'm suffering too!"" even though that's not how it works. My mood and mental clarity is fluctuating a lot, and I'm just feeling very dishonest and fake. Like I'm acting or trying to manipulate others. I've kept most all of this to myself outside of therapy. When I have thoughts about talking about things, usually out of worry that it's something I said above, I've tried to keep things to myself and avoid being toxic.

I'm sorry if this is very unorganized, or if I'm rambling. I know I got very wordy, and this is a lot. If anyone has experienced something similar to this, or have an understanding of this, I'd really appreciate it. I'm not sure if posting here was a good idea on my part, or if this is appropriate, but It's something which I thought was worth doing. Thank you for reading as well!",6.715202205882353,6.9833668805147076,7.058933823529412,74.73238970588238,64.9375,10.219117647058825,35.01470588235294,10.01556624501638,3.5024,4538,196,817,93,64,1477,350,1088,0.17800000000000002,0.662,0.159,-0.9761,0,1,6,0,0,0,194.0,2,1,6,13,59,83,1,13,41,2,83,13,1,15,10,236,198,82,0,22,51,0,41,24,0,5,12,6,0,1,79,46,0,7,80,4,1,10,22,36,2,3,75,54,93,46,121,113,31,84,0,9,4,0,33,39,0,46,56,568,172,11,0.0,0.0,0.026197489403629412,0.02926572948448558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053764096721980174,0.0,0.0,0.021468462780919483,0.0,0.08726177677617022,0.09786123760634187,0.03651193565507654,0.0,0.1642948374180113,0.0,0.0,0.018771108071596945,0.0,0.04418337781324487,0.047796653964410137,0.0,0.0,0.025222379134485492,0.0412853074087538,0.02241500285368989,0.03272972754944005,0.0,0.06853103233496409,0.09073758959318794,0.05634572306677889,0.07122840799664465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027577885456874444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029010618902454464,0.06021937573483769,0.04286814647934472,0.0,0.02948869443223965,0.0173132283446006,0.027676694322126928,0.02312212565831334,0.05449555498160005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027472428462509368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04485220453372657,0.03019775161009025,0.04755456905600081,0.0,0.0,0.01773130373770944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3664972214770975,0.1917854324034937,0.3608645792371197,0.0,0.049072889614949176,0.02283490274390889,0.0,0.029434878045273012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025752801089425608,0.07628502970813987,0.09006745605320239,0.02147092487749308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028577701837653333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02853567879854375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02692838355593416,0.053327590949804514,0.0,0.0,0.02873883182610568,0.03030547990303298,0.0,0.02801989194054066,0.0,0.023861654066449627,0.0,0.0,0.04426101422761892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037923763938414984,0.31477037606974995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04508718246900495,0.0,0.0,0.25105540003638505,0.0,0.0,0.05375905496741217,0.02721728333714096,0.0,0.029242791333095895,0.0,0.0,0.18937876172125254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893858930546302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025759132615297737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036382624886519915,0.0,0.028565672575418106,0.0,0.0,0.058142462444558736,0.025627217944785004,0.01861139888063893,0.023440592837238827,0.028047998512121596,0.0,0.05075564766071612,0.0,0.025710719272116937,0.0,0.0,0.025687668854332383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805587676136119,0.0,0.1891781733471296,0.027601807275816608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022926045012091296,0.07660910426109553,0.042697489052087485,0.0,0.054338477671108665,0.02139251348511795,0.0,0.0,0.03032795191277425,0.0,0.0,0.030175644068079592,0.0,0.0,0.04549247734017204,0.124002593245692,0.02655104192838376,0.030051515932996545,0.057004484127637665,0.0,0.10719488467222224,0.0,0.030751610218118994,0.14032455133925112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120685878931336,0.0,0.02018459362334073,0.10788761390603108,0.0,0.024715874802213805,0.1535017461347745,0.0,0.1605155590462104,0.17201613487872358,0.0791271672259606,0.17049962833526885,0.07826959452271888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822643939773348,0.0,0.0,0.05589455290237496,0.0,0.0,0.029566699254421624,0.11075239562532094,0.01583426447122586,0.0,0.02153396731918131,0.0,0.04827494065125818,0.024886193663087787,0.0,0.029972218132493768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01954395855158784,0.02726306853555277,0.0,0.11442231003539036,0.1174060496666081,0.09786123760634187,0.017287723403268406
mentalhealth,d0nkki,2020/03/18,"Ptsd troubles I'm will say that I've never been professionally been diagnosed with PTSD, but ever since I was 10 I've been plagued by vivid flash backs and nightmares as well as common panic attacks. Though I have been diagnosed with a eating disorder  and depression, as well as my slowed development. 

As much as I've tried to get my parents to get me diagnosed, they have always refused, and I am legally not allowed to go to a therapist until I'm 17. 

Their refusal is also as to why i possibly have it. 
I've been a victim of abuse for most of my life, though I've only been verbally abused by my parents. 

Its my sister who is the real abuser. She has been physically, verbally and mentally abusive to me, for as long as I can remember, though it started getting bad after my 8th birthday, though it got bad after she broke my wrist when I was 10, which was also the start of my problems.
 
Throughout the years its only gotten worse, until a couple months ago. When she full on attacked me, it was the worst thing she's ever done to me, I am not sure if it's because I can remember it much better than the wrist incident, it was also the first time I tried to fight back. It didn't go well

Ever since then I've taken a toll for the worse, everything has been bad for me, I can't eat properly, or even leave bed some days, I've lost about 15 kg in about 3 and a half months, I haven't talked to any family in a few days, and I haven't talked to friends in about a month. People are starting to worry and I don't know how to explain it to them. 

Does anyone have any advice on how to either get away from my situation, or somehow get better?",6.479317226890759,5.206650244047624,7.2896638655462205,78.00239495798321,65.9047619047619,10.286834733893556,31.96708683473389,9.325443323948027,2.585075490196078,1286,41,265,20,17,432,168,336,0.268,0.687,0.045,-0.9982,4,0,0,0,4,0,33.0,0,0,3,4,24,21,4,1,15,0,33,8,2,3,5,35,51,34,0,2,7,3,0,0,1,1,4,1,1,0,15,9,2,2,4,0,0,2,8,14,3,2,19,2,34,7,49,31,8,37,0,3,1,0,19,7,0,6,28,192,49,2,0.0,0.3600281196961623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423288319868751,0.06733908243247473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822494258071572,0.06320961630597867,0.0,0.0,0.10331867378599167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05311704122652476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728440881224462,0.07137235304423488,0.1168259948915184,0.19028476520365986,0.04630803575754567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437112217444871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405469314347559,0.0,0.09798329008993348,0.0,0.06542921691958642,0.2313110096840759,0.0,0.0,0.08706336780049419,0.0,0.0664781679524624,0.07773936997592051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554639201959938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05017468271151553,0.2061461974461454,0.0,0.0,0.0682731467649885,0.0,0.07161377870347065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461645555635563,0.0,0.0,0.05869097490840632,0.0,0.1984449292115671,0.0,0.08634620934509825,0.0,0.0607567756543416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0417488072359034,0.0,0.0,0.08043679478684435,0.0,0.0,0.0536568785630141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06722732676839396,0.0,0.0,0.08292562502612091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765556411435819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18190548785666028,0.0,0.11168718134563672,0.0,0.058589494396481374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555080106792565,0.0,0.08912947770290759,0.16870202244088164,0.0,0.0,0.05266510841318128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564000539402247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268899418961201,0.1775998684507601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646569120218818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17210884524116207,0.0,0.0,0.06041103907127724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256793601361632,0.08538872206624935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613069149650316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07159685073218061,0.0,0.0,0.12211683644503155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820212822934853,0.0504682902092339,0.0,0.29854398136031474,0.0,0.04429625851802944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315155921637616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20490708404110486,0.0,0.06854730273957574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714693931978024,0.15483124405819942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04891947311909773
mentalhealth,Madwife1996,2020/03/18,"Obsession Hello,

I am 23f. I have a history of depression and anxiety. I am also currently 17 wks pregnant. Since I’ve become pregnant, I have become obsessed with looking at my husbands twitter account. He uses it for nudes. I check on it at least 2 times an hour every single day to see if he’s liked any new nudes. 

I know I have insecurity issues that adds to why I check it so much but I just don’t know how to stop. We essentially have no sex like, he’s spends a lot of time playing video games, and I have no social support that is physically present. 

I don’t know what to do. I can’t stop obsessing over it and it is definitely having a negative impact on my mental state (sometimes I cry multiple times a day about what I find during my obsessive looking) and a negative impact on my relationship. I just feel so lonely and lost.",2.2955357142857125,4.445775339285717,4.659761904761903,80.35607142857144,78.34523809523809,7.771428571428572,26.57142857142857,8.660442795831766,2.2207785714285717,659,27,127,15,16,230,101,168,0.26,0.66,0.08,-0.9846,1,2,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,0,1,7,12,0,5,6,0,14,3,2,2,0,22,24,11,0,1,4,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,2,5,3,4,0,7,8,0,0,1,4,20,4,15,23,4,18,0,3,3,3,9,6,0,2,13,85,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295096727760551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013012173633648,0.0,0.12388969607381985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3577174519014714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17789215769592553,0.20888598876293776,0.0,0.13948548428704666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364480859291572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188572148347639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480174417018819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15948605423057902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690315265453032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26700698265410405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823912196382525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719908876356461,0.0,0.17678525758286914,0.1376823086503994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632053871734672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905033647122708,0.0,0.0,0.15641028573520774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17387143145865028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905150450629108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13396497191021,0.0,0.0,0.1650854839330489,0.0,0.0,0.16017060872492642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707913828114709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18377655158665585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28329935901962217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398709838138683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461327854641999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vadimuha,2020/03/18,"Has anyone else afraid that they can loose their mind? I have a depression for a few years now, but now I feel better generally but every night I get worse. Every night I feel very paranoid and scared something is going to happen, I'm very vigilant of every sound in fear I'll be killed even though it's not probable and worst of all I feel like I can just loose my mind and do something irreversible. I do not have a history of psychosis or anything like that but I still fear I can have one any moment",7.2405882352941155,5.807078352941176,7.173843137254902,79.9642941176471,64.49019607843137,10.512941176470589,31.184313725490192,9.3871,2.411958431372549,400,11,83,6,5,128,65,102,0.284,0.578,0.139,-0.9587,0,0,2,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,1,6,10,1,4,3,0,11,0,0,0,1,17,18,8,1,0,7,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,7,0,1,0,4,12,3,6,17,3,9,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,9,54,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551951042435144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849702149724874,0.15898787679702533,0.12768998170327153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723342071141598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364590705266152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962289122553458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024869515143568,0.0,0.392207009270036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34921411137194996,0.2353726965552882,0.1108519971382316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106883686863092,0.0,0.08818550803280498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13721448426406122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17167031976810576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15161442134402858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3133507431472051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912291738489167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514580224520716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672972681562731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535016290900755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23891170007610266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12391730591840075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15245169918909804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560595784372353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812937267521915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999230567832606
mentalhealth,redalienbaby,2020/03/19,"experiences with mental health in rural areas? hey guys, i'm wondering what the experience is like for those living in rural areas and/or small towns when it comes to dealing with their mental illness-- things like getting medication, seeing doctors etc? what is usually the hardest part? if anyone's comfortable sharing their experiences or challenges it would be greatly appreciated",8.046344086021506,11.683528903225813,7.662580645161295,58.53053763440864,66.41935483870968,9.29462365591398,36.13978494623656,9.725611199111238,4.745152688172043,320,16,37,8,6,101,50,62,0.0,0.7659999999999999,0.23399999999999999,0.9386,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,1,1,6,0,0,2,0,4,4,0,0,0,7,9,3,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,4,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,6,6,7,2,9,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,3,4,25,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040553248877032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16065372419760116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19227389490485405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19089123257375468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079974309061148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5473000222284872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743884849748756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056175330307051,0.0,0.1846648824658377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19824138108731432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822295126216547,0.0,0.16468341711602116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187879699948504,0.375897411370222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20196193923052644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486168052338465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390268935473857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20540402545773434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20225190884636055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248465151735028,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seeyagoodbye,2020/03/19,"Self-care survey I am conducting academic research for my thesis on self-care and mental health tracking tools. We are looking for participants to provide feedback on some early designs so that we can understand whether they would be beneficial to self-care practice and mood tracking in order to better understand mental health. If you would be interested in participating in this survey, you can find it at this [link](https://forms.gle/295R5kZo1NRTXrcW9). The survey takes around 15 minutes

[https://forms.gle/295R5kZo1NRTXrcW9](https://forms.gle/295R5kZo1NRTXrcW9)",15.206962025316455,18.201117291139237,11.334025316455698,41.944835443038,46.9746835443038,11.383291139240509,41.11645569620253,11.20814326018867,5.388658734177216,482,20,51,10,5,139,56,79,0.0,0.894,0.106,0.8176,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,2,2,1,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,0,0,13,12,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,2,12,8,1,9,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,2,1,38,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16701404917629928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592716364286506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17147355138033188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3988445940745368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575464448977166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3781366171616608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5871592675404772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106053174862018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3906204653604236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665477145373125,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nightmare-nn,2020/03/19,"not sure if this exists is there some sort of medication that would essentially dilute over-thinking? or dilute most senses of feeling? 

i'm (20s) struggling with life and i feel that most of it stems from over thinking. 

example: what if i never find someone who will love me? what if i do end up finding them, we get married, and have kids, then they decide that they want a divorce and want to take the kids. how will i continue to live knowing that the person i married stopped loving me? did they ever care to begin with? was i just a convenient option?

after every relationship i have ends and i essentially think like this. 

i know i shouldn't be thinking ahead like this, but i truly don't know how to turn it off. how can i stop it from affecting me. it always gets me into thinking about suicide and each time it get worse and worse. i just want it all to stop

disclaimer: i know none of you are medical professionals. i'm just seeking opinions",3.445844594594593,5.477529891891893,4.3550506756756775,84.43311655405407,74.4054054054054,6.7871621621621605,26.157094594594607,7.645422480735847,1.4694932432432433,750,27,143,10,16,242,110,185,0.135,0.762,0.102,-0.9064,0,0,0,0,1,1,22.0,1,1,4,1,9,7,0,1,4,0,14,5,0,4,4,55,38,15,1,8,9,0,2,2,0,4,3,0,0,3,16,11,0,3,13,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,2,24,6,20,31,6,17,0,0,0,2,14,4,0,10,15,106,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702848211275004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114442887885114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278517812561221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635104432619553,0.10837431561918293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007597672512974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23512662467793466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20160786409782944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827614992533281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908534903883663,0.1256819136027576,0.0,0.1135805430416495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321828939561796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591575851455568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920554845095236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123126744219838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380979239228181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089857631083292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226153440107836,0.0,0.1344695141237113,0.0,0.14069773671283314,0.0,0.12123000748532675,0.0,0.09671196064447986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.412096918497516,0.0,0.0,0.07500379830671812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990991176322598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276037047292349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621650629068987,0.09137336914391993,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gnataral,2020/03/19,Why do people in psych wards have a red mark at the top of their forehead A question I’ve been scared to ask. I have seen loads of people online with it and thought it was a coincidence but I’ve realised it must be a psych ward thing,4.3303333333333365,4.179407900000001,4.834,90.09033333333336,70.0,7.466666666666668,26.66666666666667,6.42735559955562,0.7834666666666665,185,5,43,1,3,59,38,50,0.044000000000000004,0.924,0.032,-0.1406,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,5,0,7,1,1,0,1,6,10,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,2,2,0,6,4,0,3,0,0,2,0,3,3,0,1,0,26,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3548800327070843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5263415113507158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4252451963900874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3800514708443344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521931212560293,0.0,0.0,0.3013644777531894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425350484414199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheRealBoi5,2020/03/19,"Depression Let me start by saying, I know I sound like the everyday teenager who thinks they have depression.
Although for me I think it's real. I have lived in an abusive household (physical on many occasions but also constant verbal abuse and emotional abuse) for my entire life and I despise my father to the point where I never want to see him again in my life. I have no friends. My brother is just amazing at everything, he has loads of friends, he is extremely clever, he is happy, has a girlfriend and just enjoys life. He always goes to parties and is talking to his friends on discord calls at home. And then there's me, no friends, good grades but not as good as his, depressed, angry and unhappy all the time. I hate my life at home because of my dad and I hate school. My brother hardly any speaks to me and doesn't really want much to do with me at all. I have no enjoyment in life anymore. My happiness has just degraded over the years. My mum says how I used to be a lovely, happy child when I was very young. Then my happiness turned to anger as I grew up and then after counselling at age 12-13 I was less angry, but still quite angry. The only positive aspect of my life right now is my mum as she is always there for me. I have contemplated suicide several times but I have never come close to doing it. The only thing which is stopping me from suicide is my mum; I would never commit suicide as I wouldn't abandon her, she is always here for me. I tried going to the gym and it improved my happiness a tiny bit, and only for a brief period after exercising. I hate sports so they are out of the question. I just spend all my time playing video games on my own and feeling depressed and angry.

There wasn't really much point in this, I just wanted to express my feelings",4.606819248826291,5.469888774647888,5.435651408450706,82.43723298122067,69.70422535211267,8.282863849765258,29.15786384976525,8.472884824447931,2.082223004694835,1405,51,274,21,24,459,177,355,0.22699999999999998,0.57,0.203,-0.8885,0,0,0,0,2,6,37.0,0,0,2,1,17,29,5,0,13,0,29,8,0,2,7,50,47,30,3,5,10,7,3,1,5,2,7,4,2,1,7,17,0,2,6,6,1,4,10,11,0,0,3,8,55,18,45,40,8,47,0,5,1,1,35,20,0,1,24,201,62,2,0.0,0.27217919101905164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123534192797229,0.191144427777532,0.0,0.0,0.0520722160479479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593976766488343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046678145476736765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359780389382204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818951966890574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596079624134006,0.0,0.08274813088214089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638085987314864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613423625949311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881880919191112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774351451374599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23664021331327545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04351815894629602,0.12845147610899996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4075665224385932,0.06859430199195997,0.22679973693399466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15361777798834933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042082478035579365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830100566721797,0.32451433654045986,0.03740966420551597,0.0,0.06761529727973578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911005607870555,0.0,0.0,0.07763292921846301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257982364084232,0.0,0.17717328524791387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17471148410748216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477233283987012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577920259704683,0.08144473324096194,0.0,0.08715675468970162,0.09810915538960674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539286113299292,0.0,0.12178772966894512,0.0,0.07749588999434907,0.061018708760285575,0.0,0.0,0.08650561171079306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05419871173521221,0.0,0.061151238286768016,0.06401839554595297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25127506101821634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061546418062131215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0508716501102064,0.09812967927809592,0.0,0.0,0.1339508682686548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05198799094463498,0.08328935593117535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661344232909504,0.0,0.06318068400767095,0.13549408855699135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05439521024170176,0.0,0.0,0.04931045434218136
mentalhealth,Jellycrayon,2020/03/19,"Please read, someone please Hey everyone, I want to post this somewhere because I have nowhere else to go to without someone stopping me, I’m 16, and tonight I’m going to run the bathtub with my childhood stuffed animal in the same room, im going to drink to numb pain, then I’m going to take the sharpest knives the house and cut my arteries, my inner thighs, my wrists, my neck, any veins I can see, then I’m going to bleed out, I’ll pray for hours, I’m religious, I’m writing notes for family members and my partner, I sent them messages about how much I love them, I’m doing it in the middle of the night because I’ll have hours to do it, I’ll have my Bible in the same room, my cross on, any other things I want to die next to, I’ll take a note on the door to tell my family members not to open it, I don’t want to scar them, I’ll tell them to call someone. I’ll be dead by then",5.011884816753927,3.7375474921466,5.8213036649214684,87.3458821989529,68.84293193717278,8.896544502617802,30.61832460732985,7.554174236665415,1.6467922513089008,685,22,162,6,10,226,98,191,0.085,0.8270000000000001,0.08800000000000001,-0.5508,0,0,1,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,4,0,2,4,1,0,9,0,8,9,4,1,0,16,28,7,2,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,3,1,6,6,1,1,0,2,0,8,3,3,0,0,1,1,21,1,28,26,3,30,1,0,1,1,13,11,0,0,10,83,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18358529611496704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456801361312404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13783210328791826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400904008661666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322313453885253,0.0,0.0,0.11276045905263303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128981449917733,0.0,0.0,0.2544987520149707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835679899419608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265860910988788,0.15575154499035304,0.0,0.0,0.14580413494521016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12182686922761694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922758156021144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355529390181804,0.12667182093471882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363077071626518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963402405362409,0.0,0.0,0.12927580875170894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13501890949410192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756348170390014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3431104010369429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285131491510644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20297990401317248,0.0,0.2359611017691182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967629628763693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388483173700373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13011819875878022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TIseek,2020/03/19,"What to do? I'm at a point in my life where I'm genuinely considering threatening lives just to go to prison for fun, I'm stationed in Sweden so jail is not too bad. I've been suicidal for about 4 years now, and I've toyed with my own life many times. I have nobody I could consider close and I only want to have fun in life at this point. I value the life of all equal to that of an insect, so I couldn't care less what happens to others, full on sociopath. Suggestions as to how I should move forward?",2.5568457943925225,3.583151168224301,3.962698598130842,90.47432827102804,74.70093457943925,7.592990654205607,22.72079439252337,8.07648339933343,0.8774682242990655,393,10,91,6,8,130,72,107,0.13,0.753,0.11800000000000001,-0.5133,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,3,0,8,4,0,1,1,12,15,6,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,0,8,3,20,11,5,17,0,0,0,0,1,12,0,0,4,59,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18285342560669987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22328213227414925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17485135925083334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12446109505933885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936584065848384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6187364947756386,0.0,0.0,0.193378445824968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22202867991538602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327592525434365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16655715803827895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41404607905819824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395472756864808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769896638197895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12917015979988974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102694814996955
mentalhealth,mikokoro1,2020/03/19,"Do you use any apps to cope with mental illness? I like using youper because I can track my mood and also vent to an AI. But I am looking for an app that could help me with dissociation and forgetfulness, since they're making my day to day life really difficult. Any apps you personally like to use?",4.864830508474576,5.812341203389836,6.162500000000001,77.15188559322034,69.16949152542372,9.289830508474578,26.614406779661017,9.516144504307137,2.164928813559322,237,7,47,5,4,80,44,59,0.086,0.787,0.127,0.3751,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,4,0,11,9,4,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,2,7,8,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,4,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895371748984304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223504730989447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14447937326070873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892335622662384,0.0,0.0,0.3057042716373272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886311173928094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740749330200286,0.2315826724949987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19902908923922571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15820631884876135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388507927632009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069483870202069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183496620374742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960574972273683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6141028053136947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,childrenofsad,2020/03/19,"I don't know how to talk to people. I find it so hard being around people, I just constantly feel like they're judging me. In school, I'll walk around the halls 3 or 4 times until I know some of my friends will be out of lesson so that I don't look like a loner.
I never know what to say or how to talk to people without looking like an idiot.


And then there's that specific person, because of course there is. And he's amazing, and I'd do anything in the world for him to realise how much I care about him. Yet, I don't know how to start conversations with him, or carry them on. He called me today and I just didn't say anything until he told me to hang up, I wanted to say something I really did I just didn't know how or even what to say. It just hurts because I care about him so so much and I don't want to ruin things with him again because I don't know how to function. Its happened before, we dated for about a week and I couldn't bring myself to talk to him until he ended it. It's sometimes like I can't physically bring myself to talk to him or text him because I'm so scared he'll think I'm an idiot or hate me but I know not talking is going to make that worse. I just don't know what to do.",4.0633208020050136,3.2870564849624087,5.388406015037596,88.01536591478698,70.61654135338345,7.845213032581454,25.628070175438598,6.42735559955562,0.7485847619047612,939,21,222,5,15,317,119,266,0.073,0.848,0.079,-0.1525,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,1,1,26,14,3,1,6,0,18,0,0,7,1,50,45,28,0,3,14,0,2,4,1,2,0,4,0,1,12,12,0,0,12,0,0,5,13,6,0,0,4,8,36,8,39,36,3,28,0,2,2,0,29,9,0,7,18,151,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16590871374689653,0.17947657633055947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24580044658270397,0.0,0.08577807604856404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293371049992994,0.0,0.2055558996340642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893495937435534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928377339344072,0.0,0.0,0.06658109772895301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050970301683980826,0.07201548632145922,0.0,0.0,0.09213442247752997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788209760392321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057290102221325766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914199175232128,0.0,0.09030194907301684,0.09952458488844428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079143981026334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4432006365637376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969939481166307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16930250288971446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728846988258393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14820731760279673,0.0,0.07774743439297861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20965757274390232,0.08801949510354554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457859979847448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3206583941497788,0.1009239149571588,0.10202057180286016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760501710858764,0.09969924059671066,0.0,0.07135066856588053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4051183077950564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669707107457794,0.06459210928161893,0.0,0.0,0.058780511565427324,0.0,0.09555184965115694,0.09632399788574443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891541939836728,0.0,0.08086011067089792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717292765844814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102729440775999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,winlogon1,2020/03/19,"How do you grant yourself permission to be happy in spite of tragedy? I feel affected by recent events mentally via feeling like the world is suffering from social distancing, gym closures, and death thus impacting the potential greatness of what each and everyone of us could be.

I’ve determined an issue I’m experiencing mentally is allowing myself to be happy when I feel other people may be suffering, or I may be judged for living a vibrant and happy life during this time.

If you have had similar feelings how do you move past these or “defuse from them” (as in ACT therapy, meaning tune them out and only selectively tune in what’s helpful), regardless of people being happy or not; and without use of distractions like gaming or work which are only temporary scenarios of engagement for refocus. Do I need to view greater happiness of others doing this time to help change my brain, and then steer more clear of the news? I think I need to somehow move past feelings like the govts that be don’t want us to be happy and want us to live in fear to help contain this incident.

Any input or advice is helpful. Thank you!",9.347368421052632,8.15973572248804,9.216502392344498,66.21001674641147,60.196172248803826,12.953301435406699,39.56028708133971,11.979248473330829,4.9148388516746415,902,39,150,24,10,295,128,209,0.08900000000000001,0.6609999999999999,0.25,0.988,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,3,4,2,1,4,17,1,2,6,0,22,2,1,6,1,42,36,18,1,7,8,0,5,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,10,9,0,1,7,2,0,3,3,5,0,0,1,7,17,12,28,24,3,17,0,2,1,0,15,6,0,9,11,105,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917259113992954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383289392263655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478680460370923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929901870885582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494529659359746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896941027938379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056266620165684,0.2373103057920577,0.13411744891500504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034888854625327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5995400826256755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25166873961461983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797293722583504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663011576131372,0.13757627242404993,0.0,0.16577286032269795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022488654012388,0.0,0.0,0.18919205759144228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19953189144783567,0.0,0.139202633203318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278042404072425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792136686540532,0.13015135233834388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268250540054004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568575806439474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642027798027857,0.10734528862589283,0.0,0.0,0.06014629185603765,0.0,0.0,0.10946940248218437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.338731941092363,0.08107109600787478,0.0,0.0,0.11073057685937296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048460148543036,0.0,0.06833641715615019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AndiWonderwhy,2020/03/19,"My grandmother passed a few days ago and I'm not sure how I'm supposed to feel or react.. A few days ago my grandmother was taken to the hospital, sadly she passed away the next day.
I love her, I miss her, she was like a mother to me for a huge part of my life, and I regret never finding the words or actions to show her how thankful I am.

My problem is.. that i don't feel like I can cry, I have she'd a couple tears here and there but I feel unable to allow myself to feel anything. I want to believe I'm sad, I keep telling myself maybe I'm just in shock. But idk.. why is it that everyone else who comes and gives us their condolences can just flood a room in tears yet I'm beating myself up because I'm not even sure what I'm feeling.

Honestly the past two years have been very traumatic to me, I have alot of pent up emotions, mostly sadness. The past two years when I feel the emotions escaping and tears building up, I've been telling myself man up, suck it up, stay strong, you can't break down now.. and now that I'm allowed to cry I can't, and Instead of crying about my grandmother I'm more interested in myself..",2.2159560293137908,3.5603401181434613,3.7135554075061066,90.65522318454364,76.08860759493672,6.677237397290696,24.288030202087498,7.273561745256523,0.8688700421940925,876,28,195,10,19,290,124,237,0.204,0.6809999999999999,0.115,-0.9742,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,1,1,2,13,17,1,0,13,0,16,2,0,5,3,38,40,14,0,3,8,1,6,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,7,8,0,1,7,1,0,4,6,8,0,2,5,6,34,9,24,34,6,33,0,5,0,1,16,12,1,4,17,126,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113323728491052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809383725695743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199505680662646,0.0,0.0,0.07266498684799265,0.0,0.0,0.13430085833432406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10268275104778596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13189575139315796,0.39281639418104375,0.230628044438742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995787345807734,0.2681744564199647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787323970816532,0.0,0.0,0.11390348775723025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.361635434239147,0.08515858191722024,0.0,0.0,0.10894929916776172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143502920783768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595302244974394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419653978630348,0.1164730402083523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758527925077817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975534392353344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193663194961006,0.0,0.12677364591466922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12908513407151928,0.2275853292204142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406108508762013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705444040763478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246946618099154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083771928729588,0.10974602307499044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328878422189601,0.0,0.14338642230797624,0.0,0.0,0.09835488375930962,0.07030896409456662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756208443207428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15352553018752216
mentalhealth,pearlanneswine,2020/03/19,"My boyfriend is depressed because of career crossroad. Advice? He is currently unemployed and looking for a new career path. 

He does not respond well to optimism or what he calls ""cheerleadering."" 

He is venting a lot about the ""bull shit"" of corporate culture. I tell him to play the game and he says that I don't believe in him because ""of course I'll play the game.""

Please help. How do I help him? How do I help relieve my stress during all this uncertainty?

Thanks!",1.9330303030303035,4.7530347272727305,2.824545454545458,87.87348484848488,88.0909090909091,5.660606060606061,26.65151515151515,7.1686216300943375,1.649201515151515,368,17,68,6,12,116,59,88,0.136,0.627,0.237,0.8647,3,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,1,1,5,0,6,1,1,2,1,8,8,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,2,9,5,8,8,2,3,0,1,1,0,18,1,1,2,2,40,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225003405911765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776007958786777,0.0,0.0,0.25653362628956305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23250144867341865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961128602570477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992569111415282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4578562869491026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19120595670123555,0.0,0.0,0.1935776435392924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199086784258472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499400850068316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810717324942016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337250381016885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608231754512958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199014948924112,0.2096304194884657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20472461809439166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,albin12345678,2020/03/19,"Important doc about risks of SSRI’s. https://vimeo.com/showcase/6859202/video/397138808


This documentary is very important Watch for anyone taking, prescribing or considering taking SSRI’s.",15.43891304347826,21.4907675652174,8.713369565217391,42.833532608695656,69.0,12.734782608695653,31.83695652173913,10.125756701596842,6.811617391304347,166,6,12,6,4,43,19,23,0.08800000000000001,0.75,0.162,0.2006,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3774912365039507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8118335024381356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4454511540918356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nubebunny,2020/03/19,"I'm not excited about the future, I would like time to go faster, I wouldn't mind dying I'm not suicidal, I would never do that to my loved ones, but sometimes I get this feeling like I just want this to end. I'm not suffering like depression or anything but I'm not enjoying life at all, I actually find it very hard to enjoy and I'm getting tired, I don't want to make an effort anymore and I would be okay if my life had to suddenly end anytime soon, it would actually be a relief. I'm only 26 and it looks exhausting having to live for another 60 years... I've been having this thoughts for over a month.... Is this normal? Am I okay? do I need a therapist?",0.04118493440541472,2.281065086330937,2.7945069826491786,89.59055861193401,88.78417266187051,6.436055861193397,21.12611087600508,7.724431198458867,1.068149047820567,513,18,112,11,17,179,81,139,0.094,0.647,0.259,0.9717,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,3,13,0,0,5,2,16,5,0,1,2,28,33,7,2,10,9,0,2,3,0,5,4,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,3,3,12,10,12,23,1,13,0,2,1,1,1,2,0,2,13,69,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.29623199593595145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15915522208810265,0.0,0.0,0.1505255979578547,0.0,0.0,0.1249025240086219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072843218890856,0.0,0.15752432843036207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26886517044227737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767448458376009,0.10843211072060886,0.0,0.0,0.1387247439344995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15859822686584027,0.0,0.08626042847962706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596562962117256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21441429199173814,0.22245704380295947,0.0,0.13402507496525876,0.0,0.12745750029840064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698794236578327,0.0,0.10131474755249356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15325516613360335,0.0,0.1211498489188503,0.0,0.0,0.11254341219738008,0.11706257702283485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14871278901871945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285048140939096,0.1154360068251132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501149217667895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16602337165675388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17622900719290302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049686429374333,0.08850450457038997,0.17444950365175896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12523491356477714,0.17904829337726988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312824123354104,0.0,0.0,0.09774174788347026
mentalhealth,Fandina,2020/03/19,"If you are feeling down or lonely due to the Coronavirus lock down, feel free to send me a message I'm open to listen and talk for a while to help you get your mind off this whole situation.
Love for you all, we are all together through this 🙏🏼",8.96076923076923,4.771442769230767,8.846153846153848,77.94884615384619,63.61538461538462,12.707692307692303,37.53846153846154,10.125756701596842,3.255276923076924,192,6,45,3,2,63,41,52,0.044000000000000004,0.752,0.205,0.8481,0,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,4,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,10,8,4,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,6,3,10,8,3,7,0,1,0,1,11,4,0,2,2,30,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896679415943054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013185508708117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25827797333207997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34777455699025484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3890725460074842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4331260530411634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3097129345622087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4302061792393745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shirtzip,2020/03/19,"Mental Health and Quarantine My mental health has been in rapid decline since last Tuesday. My university shut down and asked us all to move out. I had to leave the city where I had my therapist and psychiatrist. Now, I'm staying alone in my parents new house and I don't know what to do. I'm on medication that is only doing half the job, but I can't get an appointment with a doctor in this new city because all the offices have shut down. I have daily panic attacks, have only been sleeping under heavy medication, and I have no idea who to reach out to.",4.220202702702704,5.427268531531531,5.341970720720724,81.47619932432436,70.8918918918919,8.072522522522524,27.388513513513516,8.472884824447931,1.8549,441,15,87,7,8,146,71,111,0.126,0.8640000000000001,0.011000000000000001,-0.9109,2,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,5,0,14,6,1,0,2,13,19,6,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,4,0,11,0,15,15,2,19,0,0,0,0,4,12,0,0,5,61,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16658659860130787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150368079917551,0.1829840639358012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804943481546458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463136367616932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403471593164492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419407844500333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18559318573098035,0.0,0.1815740856269145,0.0,0.0,0.15961354372984662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839603940733114,0.1311098962867503,0.0,0.17031131073039488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3240682224380416,0.3241872484233204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709524587994661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31068962266366784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24465928109114785,0.0,0.18871659683262745,0.17859900211659235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305239606618485,0.0,0.1609608578237243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714390466872816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18675309114141345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19347636705582047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Enkyete,2020/03/19,"I don't know what to do. TL;DR I'm unmotivated and feel better off dead

I'm not particularly depressed anymore but sometimes (like the time of posting this) I feel like I'm better off ending my own life. I have no motivation to do anything and whenever I try to change negative aspects of my life I fail. The only reason I'm still alive at this point is so for my Fiancee. I'm in therapy but I don't know if it's helping or not. At this point I don't know what I'm supposed to do.",0.4615996503496476,2.4973060865384653,3.5280419580419604,86.60786713286717,84.28846153846153,6.08951048951049,23.87762237762238,7.348242739294969,1.083107692307692,379,15,83,6,11,136,58,104,0.151,0.6679999999999999,0.18100000000000002,0.3312,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,4,2,6,0,0,2,0,8,2,0,2,0,15,19,7,1,1,6,0,2,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,7,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,0,2,10,4,12,19,1,11,0,2,0,0,2,7,0,2,5,51,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985933763008672,0.0,0.0,0.16478801139403138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3542082502351132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21183707853364625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724743238301787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773613348567792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025040027124956,0.14305805297956292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422280313393312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301551342534893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828838333910588,0.195663267068188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229852366045968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3786003994705118,0.0,0.1917833588129278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20588950673208306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19805155768359214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599192524520184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290023872595649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676690622009987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359560473552552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notokbutitsokay,2020/03/19,"What mental illness does this sound like? Disclaimer - I understand that the only person who can diagnose you with a mental illness is a mental health care professional. I’m purely wondering what illnesses to look into to help narrow out wildly inaccurate ones. 

I am a 17 year old female. My family life is fine, in fact, I cause most of the trouble. I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD, but it doesn’t quite explain everything. I also have an anxiety disorder and depression.

Im prone to extreme bouts of anger. As in, threatening murder, throwing things, screaming. It’s basically a toddler tantrum but more violent. It’s triggered by the smallest things. (ex. my sister dried out my makeup wipes and i broke down for hours.) I initially got upset over the makeup wipes, leading to wildly irrational thoughts and contemplating my life as a whole. 

I suffer from a lot of intrusive thoughts. These can go anywhere from “you could just start making monkey noises in the middle of the grocery store, what can anyone do about it?” to “your entire family could die in an accident leaving you helpless.” They effect the quality of my life tremendously. 

Im extremely codependent, as well as having an intense fear of abandonment. Anyone who has ever “left me” I have become obsessed with mentally. Sometimes I try to emulate them, other times I just social media stalk them a little too extensively. I don’t ever try to contact these people, just that. 

I often dissociate , or have moments of derealization. Sometimes it happens at the same time and I genuinely feel like nothing is real. 

I have an extremely unorganized headspace, and I feel like I have too many thoughts. I can often be going on 3 rants simultaneously that can last HOURS, trying to think my concious thoughts, while also having intrusive thoughts, while also thinking about the future and past at the exact same time. Its complete cacophony inside my head, almost constantly. All of the “voices” are my own. 

I also have trouble empathizing, but its not impossible. Just hard. 

Ive written a novel here, so hopefully this gives some insight, but I would be so appreciative if anyone could point me in the right direction.",5.1795079365079335,7.975920566233772,5.989664502164505,71.16767135642138,71.9090909090909,8.745310245310245,30.954184704184705,9.372597083632963,3.493656565656565,1738,78,260,43,36,568,225,385,0.215,0.71,0.075,-0.9968,0,0,0,0,0,0,54.0,0,4,3,3,20,22,4,3,24,0,30,10,1,5,6,62,54,24,2,6,11,2,3,3,0,1,9,3,0,1,22,12,0,1,14,1,1,4,3,15,1,1,8,7,37,7,42,40,9,40,0,5,1,0,17,19,0,10,20,197,59,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097669951490514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413471577646467,0.0,0.0,0.2687656818371626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427569834003036,0.0,0.0,0.1762479355596558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279439597496132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566482703704613,0.08631252810321828,0.0,0.0,0.08809423259830605,0.0907966589108332,0.0,0.2012513669793884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236701029200307,0.17055873004495836,0.08720034736045784,0.0,0.09629514046329253,0.0,0.07352718694955405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200328634609006,0.0,0.0,0.07551249651484579,0.0,0.15841470537092436,0.09454678317162626,0.08496690361225118,0.12004898308828148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060042787702403,0.09550193804140786,0.0,0.0671991262632775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429933481641526,0.0,0.07526615253777122,0.0,0.08622960268901013,0.08931020407983307,0.0,0.0,0.05631738545256588,0.0,0.0,0.083451633732574,0.1654871686029208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18151381015691007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848818349111836,0.0,0.08896591813637893,0.09128886821335737,0.0,0.17803917268238084,0.12314498773422301,0.08421093603138217,0.0,0.0,0.07055632873007038,0.0,0.0,0.07143149767918522,0.0,0.0,0.056084550668122006,0.08518392523617657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33869290395802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062024411730934,0.0,0.08816571815920728,0.0,0.05693468300710144,0.06390162074237334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802073811106926,0.05824945830010765,0.07336374034855303,0.0,0.0,0.07942683408347709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893664858085565,0.0,0.0956340891688218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175332233126355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856486463513157,0.0,0.0,0.16619748139842186,0.0,0.059470369788022885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163940052897438,0.10767429938850376,0.0,0.3335157345839896,0.14697964977990727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113386722835114,0.0,0.0,0.08746863815478759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554480886793769,0.0,0.0,0.09380624645504833,0.0,0.0,0.0911169966408196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059685980795546816,0.0,0.0,0.05410665420373322
mentalhealth,m_boulay12,2020/03/19,"Anxiety and COVID-19: What to Do Once again, I have felt compelled to write about mental health, basing what I write on my own experiences in dealing with OCD and anxiety. This topic is especially prevalent now that the COVID-19 pandemic has reached America, causing Americans to feel more anxious on a day-to-day basis. This means that those who have preexisting issues with anxiety are now in double trouble, and that those who do not have preexisting issues are now facing a new monster in anxiety. So, what should people do?

1.  Face it:

When it comes to dealing with anxiety, one of the worst things a person can do is deny that it is an issue. Anxiety, like many other mental issues, feeds off of one’s denial. Denial allows anxiety to sneak into the psyche and nest there without a person even realizing it. This is why it is so imperative to face the beast that is anxiety. If one spends their time denying its existence or worrying about when their next panic attack is going to come, the affect will be much worse than if one confronts it. Confronting anxiety can take many forms, and since I am not a doctor I will not even attempt to prescribe a specific solution, especially since there seems to be no universal fix. However, by confronting it one can learn how to draw on the energy of anxiety. Anxiety is not an inherently bad thing. It can drive people to study, start projects, or do many other necessary activities. By facing your anxiety and learning how to draw on its energy, you may not only rid yourself of the issues that result from an anxiety disorder, but also make yourself a more active person. Confront your anxiety and find your solution.

2.  Fight:

Have you ever read the Hobbit? In this book the main character, Bilbo, travels across his world in order to find an ancient treasure. When he comes to the cave where the treasure is hidden, there is an evil dragon that is guarding the treasure and Bilbo and his companions must face and fight the dragon in order to get the treasure. Why is this relevant to the topic of anxiety? Just like the dragon, anxiety can be a monster. However, beneath it is the treasure of peace. But you can never get the treasure without fighting the monster. Often times people think that dealing with their anxiety will be a matter of simply relaxing or going to counseling or getting medicated. This is incorrect. You have to literally fight it. As with all good things in life, you must struggle to attain them, just like Bilbo had to struggle against the dragon. Once you face it and fight it you will discover that it is not a great beast, but merely a hallow reflection of one. You must fight the monster in order to get the treasure.

3.  Socialize:

Although we are being told to socially isolate ourselves, it is extremely important to keep in touch with friends and family. Just like when one avoids anxiety, isolating oneself causes the effects of anxiety to feel much worse. Going back to the analogy of the Hobbit, Bilbo did not face and fight the dragon alone. He had help from friends, and a magic ring, and although this sounds silly it is immensely important. No one can fight a monster alone. Everyone needs help and no one should feel ashamed of needing help. In fact, the shame that stems from feeling like you need help is actually a by-product of anxiety because it knows that once you get help, its days are numbered. It will try to tell you that you are weak or that people will think you are strange. It is lying. Socialize with people so that you do not have to face the monster yourself.

4.  Find an anchor:

As I am sure everyone knows, ships have anchors so that they can maintain their position when waves are attempting to move it. Anxiety is much like these waves. It will try to move you out of reality and into its delusional and chaotic world. This is why one suffering from anxiety must find some kind of anchor in reality. For me, it was my parents. When I dealt with anxiety I knew that if I was ever straying too far from reality that I could be brought back down to earth by calling my parents who would remind me of exactly what it was the anxiety was trying to do, which was take away my sense and create chaos. One must find their own anchor, but whatever it is make sure that it is steady and strong and truthful. 

 In closing, I would like to say that in no way, shape, or form am I an expert on this topic. Everything I have written today is based on my own experience or on books and articles I have read (most of which have been written by Jordan Petersen, Robert Moore, or Carl Jung). Everyone must do their own research on this topic. There is no universal fix to anxiety, and people must find what works for them as at the end of the day they are the ones who must ultimately face it. But remember, while it may seem like anxiety is a great big beast, it is actually a hallow reflection of one, and you as well as your support system are much stronger than anxiety could ever be. Good luck!",6.637660734149054,7.3844302677419424,6.967749351130888,73.66645161290323,65.13978494623656,10.370782350760104,33.99147200593252,10.324001499409627,3.640632183908047,3959,167,685,92,58,1285,348,930,0.16,0.7070000000000001,0.132,-0.9144,5,3,0,0,9,0,111.0,1,20,10,6,37,56,14,6,55,0,105,15,9,11,18,144,143,61,0,20,29,2,6,8,3,21,5,3,0,3,79,40,1,3,26,6,1,11,16,25,1,13,15,9,54,31,112,98,18,80,0,1,0,0,72,37,0,19,35,528,133,11,0.0,0.0,0.06746318503467087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716002482826151,0.0,0.02764255106060779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7139616196790891,0.03904992955795667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03932400481061992,0.03247605150913198,0.053158497175385004,0.028861305405503045,0.021071214418511557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03529592097965924,0.0,0.0,0.07101794987974404,0.0,0.08932707586956554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055196542948667916,0.0,0.0,0.08916927186140845,0.10690860036819004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03961582176637712,0.035379936361299484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03061536395759123,0.0,0.0,0.04566125427260672,0.09380123032406434,0.0,0.09908836088705106,0.031065841834528006,0.06762468761541195,0.032585905700713805,0.0,0.06991077002119354,0.02469407643199344,0.033188940777660485,0.0,0.1895571011369876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05341146937008653,0.0,0.09029697730165387,0.0,0.058934247422914685,0.05798492137644948,0.0,0.0762186417396933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03674221886715194,0.0,0.0,0.1158448647410034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18039048756846648,0.0,0.03072399722576426,0.0,0.035995343483830995,0.037993322523574534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024415105817678258,0.13509826455154206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04614636943102287,0.10513400312666346,0.0,0.03765268900846666,0.0,0.034821776454242566,0.06966913206722179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734767298050181,0.10164043917797236,0.07689112397379258,0.02665955873326534,0.03338421924141497,0.036761510481966735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043551840950376,0.3044980791894269,0.026289127423595127,0.0,0.04055594898304208,0.07676327508901379,0.0,0.0,0.14378296642402627,0.09054553057755634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06915104168886782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0391567286548968,0.0,0.0,0.02748840318299494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293547998736257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05718698066304646,0.0,0.0,0.1057075619411534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024466110735888502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227212521055963,0.0,0.0,0.03922527639893629,0.06515640617393792,0.0,0.05197891116514472,0.0,0.03021235330392787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889267577028385,0.044297207863989066,0.0,0.0,0.040311619609956266,0.0,0.032764684362076024,0.03302945362901702,0.0,0.07040447471898724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02743701424257565,0.0,0.0,0.031079135136918783,0.0,0.09357176720246904,0.0,0.0,0.06664110249862339,0.0,0.02516458107418956,0.035103620215074856,0.07045175397454873,0.04910962621315527,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reallydevastated,2020/03/19,"Molested by my father as a teen and childhood traumas a killing me from inside, extremely suicidal too Today I opened my first reddit account only for the sole purpose of sharing my sorrow and how things are killing me from inside. I am a 22 year old female. I have had an extremely rough childhood with a lot of alcohol and violence. Our house smelled like alcohol all the time and it was putrid and atrocious. I have always been an average student in school because I used to emotionally and physically drained by all the chaos at home. Everyday. However, I had my mother's support and she was aware of my condition and she was infact proud of me that I could make it up to this much. But that didn't stop me from getting bullied and insulted by teachers and relatives.
I grew up, overweight and not so pleasant to look at. As a teen, I faced a lot of bullying by my cousins and classmates made fun of me all the time about my appearence and for how socially inept and abnormally quiet I was.

As if these were not enough for a 13 year old girl to bear, that one night I got wrongly touched by my drunk father as I was trying to fall asleep on my bed. I was frozen and could move a muscle as he kept going on with his disgusting activities. Out of embarrassment and out of the fear, I pretended to be asleep. Before this incident took place, there had been other instances where his hands would go on my chest and waist on several occassions but I neglected them and thought they were ""mistakes"". Ofcourse I was young and foolish. Sure my father is alcoholic and throw tantrums at my mother but the idea of a father molesting her very own child was beyond me at that age.

Nothing much is left to say after this. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, PTSD, manic depression, acute misophonia and misokinesia. Regarding misophonia and misokinesia, I particularly get furious at certain sounds and movements that my father make because my trauma is rooted from him and then it spiked towards my brother as well. My case is acute and I get extremely violent by those triggers. So anyway, as I am growing older, these horrors are getting more embedded with me and I am afraid that it will drive me insane one day. I get nervous breakdowns out of nowhere. My sex life with my boyfriend is at stake because everytime I let him touch my body, I get traumatic flashbacks and then I am unable to continue with it. I can't explain him why. I am sensitive about this past of my and fear that he wouldn't understand. My mental condition is aggravating and it is affecting my daily activities. I have also attempted suicide 2 years back and now I don't even have the courage to do that. I just feel trapped inside an unwanted body and emotionally drained. Moreover, I love my mother so much. She has sacrificed a lot for me and I dread to inflict such torture on her. I am in so much pain right now and I don't know what to do. Will I ever be able to pursue my career or anything at all? Will I ever be healed? I don't know.",4.3674237058247325,6.215814218370888,5.253429658654209,79.73941809208048,71.46100519930674,8.760892170898954,31.607603044231787,9.318704503766252,3.0235520608846347,2392,110,438,54,46,780,284,577,0.21100000000000002,0.74,0.05,-0.9986,1,1,3,0,0,1,51.0,1,0,2,3,23,35,10,6,20,0,54,20,8,9,8,88,79,54,4,7,8,10,5,1,0,5,9,3,2,2,24,43,6,3,7,2,1,11,8,24,1,3,22,10,83,11,74,46,14,65,0,3,1,2,33,26,0,6,29,334,107,3,0.08742903696511617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803051549431725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991696927376234,0.07274796254910113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194664798555662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06722753275379235,0.0,0.15988778834085698,0.0,0.07439567100446867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942279012054441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13960994370231852,0.0,0.0,0.056384496018733014,0.0,0.07530250142703171,0.08873863215282272,0.0,0.0,0.10020125085856432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19669179791818905,0.0,0.09033756643970768,0.0,0.05774605435257354,0.15816913868355315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19676394660978272,0.044206748038194466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436709417938357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27406837988307736,0.0,0.09937587302044604,0.0,0.06992498765552738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08769845260395953,0.0,0.0,0.10088137021054366,0.0,0.09869674083466122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19345455142480303,0.0,0.09609742449836306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499190447650836,0.0894021137953145,0.06175371439226107,0.04271341124991801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341837148507106,0.0,0.0,0.2229871222073794,0.07890811931852065,0.08272746872206921,0.11671912214362645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881079057318839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292323000236563,0.2570816075331418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204622858637173,0.0,0.08389051894219536,0.0,0.1834841342957244,0.0,0.11848835625764755,0.06649372231526265,0.09303065953631937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346090858494172,0.0,0.0,0.0913447353065932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219986557297883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466391986406715,0.0,0.06952707933925366,0.0,0.08848285302221369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876992608460823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912289298769048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309458971596489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19126635226585445,0.0992134350670514,0.08240083265947004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808396729203447,0.0,0.0,0.06940888943210548,0.10196114908010002,0.0,0.08287250423396421,0.0,0.09713687699970726,0.05935857710660196,0.0,0.0,0.0910167108312787,0.0,0.07551061683643784,0.0,0.0721381118056883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860920403687517,0.0,0.07889110714422876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210707939840258,0.09558992708119836,0.0,0.16890429999588238
mentalhealth,MashTheMechanic,2020/03/19,"Anyone have Anhedonia? Does anyone here have any experience with SSRI induced Anhedonia? (Lack
Of pleasure in life, and daily activities) how do you cope? And have you found a permanent cure? Please share your stories.",4.4658333333333315,7.8505916944444465,5.433333333333334,66.79500000000002,90.38888888888887,7.955555555555558,28.222222222222207,8.344100000000001,3.517922222222221,175,8,24,5,6,57,30,36,0.0,0.777,0.223,0.8466,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,2,0,7,5,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,3,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,16,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561735930106281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5268044121153795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296587251288404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3684916083930215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4130396448942489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26607920654680195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4135110260914495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,T1S9A2R6,2020/03/19,"Anybody else actually thriving mentally, during this pandemic? First, this post isn’t meant to be insensitive, or shame anybody. Second, everybody’s circumstances are different, this is just my situation. 

I’ve been working through depression, anxiety, and a sense of hopelessness for many years.  I saw a therapist on a weekly basis, for a while.

However, since the pandemic crisis started in the US and I started telecommuting last week, I’ve actually been feeling much better mentally.  

Since the stress of my work commute and dealing with a toxic office culture (and toxic colleagues) has been eliminated, I’ve been getting a solid eight hours of sleep every night, I’ve quit smoking, I’ve started jogging and/or exercising everyday, I’m spending quality time with my spouse and dog, and I’m still finding time to get all my work done.  

Oddly enough, I’ve found a certain life balance this last week that I’m liking a lot, despite the fact that the outside world seems to be in free fall. Anybody else feel this way? 

Granted, unlike many other people right now, I have job security, a steady income, and a generally reliable means of getting supplies for the long haul. In that regard I feel very blessed.  If anything, the only things worrying me are the physical and mental health of my extended family, friends, and spouse - but thankfully, they all seem to be doing well too.

Maybe my depression and anxiety stem from a certain kind of agoraphobia or social anxiety I didn’t even realize I had, and this new situation, where I’m actually required to stay home or otherwise be alone, is the sort of “medicine” I needed.

Thoughts?",8.326894523326573,8.964649437931037,8.396734279918864,65.24581135902639,61.51724137931034,11.926977687626774,40.851926977687626,11.557038098267885,5.254269776876266,1307,69,202,37,17,426,174,290,0.09699999999999999,0.81,0.09300000000000001,-0.4928,4,1,0,0,0,1,46.0,1,0,1,7,7,16,0,2,20,0,19,4,1,0,5,40,41,17,0,2,6,2,3,1,1,0,3,0,1,0,11,13,0,2,11,2,2,2,2,5,1,3,11,4,16,12,23,26,5,32,1,3,1,0,8,7,0,8,21,121,27,5,0.0,0.0,0.2794443621326729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988602682564012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21906329141222391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854948515396397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442020586900027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984076002045733,0.16442663789107775,0.0,0.0,0.09972781402266882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768130996142754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594770589535318,0.0,0.0,0.09862821316325364,0.0,0.06304564515608932,0.0,0.08042306384309443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998436335681101,0.0,0.14479134452914086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724208978689837,0.08119206556168701,0.0,0.10465902022243373,0.07374656256851818,0.0,0.14961037615761127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146181614356213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574689709273516,0.0,0.09400173724773556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472213180996887,0.0,0.0,0.09939935679404226,0.0,0.15561347223371802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742110449441413,0.04663339511695021,0.0,0.0,0.08447268540992453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115051979845751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935482255302902,0.09589512320726606,0.10397603430812877,0.0,0.0,0.2885817822099024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701687586554957,0.07077700915767181,0.0,0.09218886662822208,0.0,0.08957594543637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259612226664207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617492244474846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141735474816863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015257556056965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151613214943197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17379320836536044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15791901242596962,0.21458579430080407,0.09552169092135428,0.09730206417705912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20268585614343748,0.10173993759059373,0.07622869430881317,0.0,0.1093408095912722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788007331851143,0.0,0.11082800683228146,0.06341456974347033,0.0,0.0,0.07577882615316281,0.11131853936483936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148179127793428,0.0,0.0,0.07875852038935081,0.0,0.0757659548181852,0.2296993299236059,0.0,0.08582349113330523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20847222979463167,0.09693690718879104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146844537557272
mentalhealth,pandemicwebseries,2020/03/19,"TODAY: Webinar on the Impact of Pandemic on Mental Health Hi all, CASA Child, Adolescent and Family Mental Health, a Canadian mental health non-profit, is putting out a live webinar series today, tomorrow, and Monday (3:00 PM MST each day) on the impact of pandemic on mental health and how best to cope with the ongoing situation.

​

They are entirely free and will also be available as video if you aren't able to join live.

​

Go to [https://www.casaservices.org/web-series](https://www.casaservices.org/web-series) to join in and for info on upcoming sessions.",14.63368131868132,13.719413659340663,11.566016483516488,52.66023351648354,49.769230769230774,14.814285714285715,41.431318681318686,13.427899808715575,5.9240747252747274,477,17,61,13,4,141,62,91,0.04,0.878,0.08199999999999999,0.7199,0,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,1,1,2,2,0,0,5,0,5,4,0,1,1,12,6,9,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,1,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,16,4,3,14,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,5,39,2,1,0.12481439500980847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981402659514496,0.0,0.2704726896924481,0.30332630310648495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098500712656208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049495914405518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766390341855873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093489703293589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5306874612447442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204267949987639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5031342140435169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12547294095208128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14029660950917536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366189046103098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30332630310648495,0.0
mentalhealth,butterflyclover,2020/03/19,"Heartbroken My grandma raised me for three years (between the ages of 3-6) in Taiwan when my parents couldn't care for me, and in early 2018, my entire family save for my grandmother disowned me. She is basically my only family now. My grandma is in Taiwan and I'm a 21 year old college student in the US. 8 months ago, my grandma was given 6 more months to live due to her medical conditions. Initially the plan was that once she began to decline, I would drop everything (work, school, etc) and immediately fly to her to be with her until the end. Obviously, that isn't going to happen now. I am a Taiwanese citizen, but I can't go to Taiwan because she won't be there anymore at the end of the mandatory 14 day quarantine.

She began to decline two days ago and right now? I am on facetime with her as I watch her heart rate and oxygen levels drop. In the last 6 hours, her oxygen levels have dropped 26% and heart rate is dropping steadily and is now in the mid 60s. I feel so helpless and I haven't come to terms with the fact that I will never see her again. I don't know how I will cope with what is going to happen in the next few hours.",4.943059472716122,4.956642450643777,6.144491109748621,80.65237124463519,68.69957081545064,9.060576333537707,29.51839362354384,8.841846274778883,2.172020478234212,893,30,183,14,14,301,128,233,0.063,0.9209999999999999,0.016,-0.8863,1,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,0,2,9,3,0,0,12,0,21,3,2,1,3,23,35,14,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,4,13,0,0,2,0,0,4,7,1,0,2,5,3,32,2,31,23,4,50,0,1,2,0,14,13,0,0,29,124,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24815649587025596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13881630775925166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853266741178903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427125255867598,0.0,0.0,0.12057495660889847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805429257737443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479503204252925,0.0,0.15610768646371428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579934453535593,0.0,0.2639095119376151,0.0,0.07077491325901633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386508544007013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24755657806864864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33173903939251603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756918165878215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692589010856701,0.11409725527887972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235993499194952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100878633302166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22345135898034668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795635386642206,0.0,0.14886362801284422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468788620004991,0.14906743236228462,0.0,0.1064563135262922,0.0,0.0,0.1554242396201891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953678310360795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166086684654575,0.11154092400860588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367339751991217,0.0,0.16837113801171585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190252758968786,0.0,0.0,0.09943330718185783,0.0,0.0,0.18027695939022811
mentalhealth,Plazier,2020/03/19,"False life 
I cant seem to stop lying. Now im in a deep, complicated web of lies that my friends(for a year now) doesnt know.

 in their eyes im a different person, living a completely made up life. they are good people and Im afraid of what's going to happen if I tell them the truth.

I know that I shouldnt prolong the lie and I shouldve told them the truth right away. I know im a piece of shit to even lie about myself in the first place.

I just want to get this out of my chest. WDID",-0.6409938837920457,1.2246695412844062,1.592866972477065,99.82092125382263,87.53211009174309,5.101223241590216,13.670489296636086,6.42735559955562,-0.9612207951070336,376,5,97,4,12,126,68,109,0.098,0.7959999999999999,0.106,-0.276,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,4,1,5,5,1,1,9,0,4,5,3,1,2,15,14,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,2,1,14,3,15,11,1,15,0,0,1,0,7,9,1,2,5,55,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14957181500288808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669161338632577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663280859544461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514881519604884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13541378593231398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317441410933357,0.0,0.09047592449671163,0.1335277770857791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14077831601891094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6878448802053209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624732661655257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248925913675713,0.0,0.0,0.14057480094811708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063705075299394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103678877982527,0.13900560279088947,0.1663280859544461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595427080897196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492793200461576,0.0,0.0,0.16341451774215052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309670404403093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13914611873017607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15212056571768398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389913868033327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251832917535388
mentalhealth,SubjectAspect4,2020/03/19,"planning to do suicide by cop this week I was doing okay but yesterday I saw a really pretty girl at trader joe's and just all these suicidal emotions came in thinking about how women are, how the world is, how nobody cares about men and Idk how I made it through last night. Had a couple beers this morning and I'm still pretty shaken up, just not sure how to progress.

I will be 31 this year and I'm just so tired. Women simply don't like me. I'm a decent looking guy its just that my personality is just meek and weird even if I try to act confident and they just don't like me and everything I do feels like a cope. I am considering suicide by police this week, but I am scared that I'll survive and end up paralyzed in jail for the rest of my life or something. Otherwise thinking of running my car in the garage, but the same thing I am worried I will wake up paralyzed.

I don't know what I should do right now.

I am nto doing good, having horrible thoughts and am not myself at all. i cant go to the hospital cos i been many times and they are zero help to me and then hand me thousands of dollars in bills. i spent the past 10 years int he mental health system and i rather die than go there again.

99% of the time i cope, but sometimes i get liek this where i just want to die more than anythign and im ready to die",1.888844086021504,3.5085535878136187,3.2813844086021504,92.24207661290323,77.63799283154124,6.370430107526883,22.377688172043012,7.1686216300943375,0.5530010752688166,1037,30,234,12,24,339,161,279,0.198,0.679,0.12300000000000001,-0.9777,0,0,2,0,0,3,19.0,0,0,2,3,22,9,0,1,11,1,26,6,2,7,3,48,44,26,6,4,16,0,2,3,0,3,3,0,0,6,12,14,1,0,5,1,3,6,6,2,0,2,8,4,30,7,28,32,5,34,0,0,2,0,10,12,0,2,18,156,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142139150866935,0.12670812309073828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750952785018564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3869380022955925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979427879320794,0.1100720472560634,0.0,0.0,0.08208342296742915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116916596254176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283790707290063,0.08878312051858687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06492931566252284,0.0,0.14125834066672074,0.10423718977714604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12305322394810753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210005463400576,0.0,0.0,0.08329988461876348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423989165404215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829908666156498,0.10130189348658644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778013173542268,0.18214558767611352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436091794937244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759338161319312,0.0,0.12599681406594115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252414311947235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11662502935384345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863593344050526,0.0,0.1085134023379446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528676551307681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961467597728461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106131409034275,0.0,0.0,0.12442240638148735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567408260000378,0.1229125865233759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924733328866284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4078147953612283,0.0,0.11712908311897838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256375103567411,0.15926266184752208,0.0,0.09866161927132824,0.14493319448437708,0.14283749716012914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437555164613289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330146994242792,0.0,0.19937414346673368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620876722305116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600599181250863
mentalhealth,ElenaG99,2020/03/19,"Going through a break up, can't seek a therapist due to COVID 19 My ex broke up with me 16 days ago, 10 days later he started flirting and messing around with one of my friends from uni. We were 4 years together, had an entire future planned out but due to several hard previous months he just couldn't take it anymore and broke up with me. I'm entirely devastated. I love him with my entire being and picturing them together drove me to self harm.
I constantly compare myself with her... at first I was wondering what she had that I didn't, then I stopped that and started regretting all the times he gave me hints that something wasn't right and I brushed it off cause I was too self absorbed in my own issues. She was there when I wasn't and that revelation hurts more than anything.  
I recently lost appetite; I eat once a day just so my mother wouldn't be as worried... I do feel hunger, but every time I think about eating I get nauseated...
So I just decided not to eat at all.
I'm sorry if I wasted anyone's time with this post, I know it's a minor issue compared to others, I just... I just needed to vent...",3.0738666666666674,4.619902808888888,4.3889999999999985,85.85950000000003,74.24444444444444,7.666666666666668,26.722222222222207,8.344100000000001,1.7336222222222215,872,32,180,15,18,288,142,225,0.163,0.785,0.052000000000000005,-0.9779,0,0,1,0,0,1,30.0,1,0,1,3,12,10,0,0,6,0,15,5,0,1,2,37,31,14,0,5,9,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,10,15,4,1,5,0,0,2,7,7,0,2,12,3,34,3,27,15,4,35,0,5,0,1,16,10,0,2,21,119,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040652652942402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347084579375253,0.09497661985548117,0.0,0.1117778413105331,0.12091893074790548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953647986390474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678571519386316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26280045387055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4169689418522553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444398967529873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868054322780959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553829795624905,0.0,0.0,0.10494316483199934,0.0,0.0709664099082501,0.0,0.07719623412340944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167844238626473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541054768997616,0.0,0.0,0.28354582106478576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464950047488901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14827624774497172,0.0,0.1225933311176481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841949508011166,0.0,0.0,0.10071741759418963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14465623143539785,0.09204301418998746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13008913491973195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411732788801045,0.0,0.0,0.11599945264807167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834039857120922,0.15345105620980112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456980940131216,0.0,0.15205236653918694,0.19228462515897535,0.0,0.0,0.11356130797879364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212846616136438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15771096826643266,0.0,0.0870354109574726,0.0,0.0,0.2376135121125377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473035867032742,0.0,0.13794359323481525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747110333477733
mentalhealth,mcorinne,2020/03/19,"Indoor ""Social"" Activity Idea: Silent Disco Video Chat Party While living in NY, there were these silent disco things that I'd witness a lot. What are they?

A **silent disco** is an event where you put on a special pair of noise-canceling headphones and gather with others who have done the same. Then, as individuals, you can tune into one or multiple channels of sound, while simultaneously and indirectly combining energies with those around you.

People need to move a little bit and feel good while still have a sense of belonging. Syncing music is tough with connection and everything. Maybe groups of friends can log on and have a Google Hangout or something where everyone can mute their microphones but can still watch friends totally having the time of their lives and just sharing energy. Families, friends, couples, whatever. Go do it. No need to worry about being in the same beat or whatever. Just have fun.

Try to do activities over video chat that's a little more engaging. Having a meal, making art, making music, playing games, etc.

We can get through this!",4.7405851063829765,7.854976356382984,4.834510638297875,77.14400000000002,75.32978723404256,8.01531914893617,26.9531914893617,8.841846274778883,2.648914042553192,857,33,137,20,20,267,129,188,0.039,0.795,0.166,0.9749,0,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,1,3,3,1,9,10,0,0,12,0,19,1,0,2,1,29,26,15,0,2,6,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,10,12,1,0,2,9,0,3,1,1,0,1,2,3,7,9,21,23,7,22,0,0,1,0,18,11,0,5,8,98,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431032063367389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754993594262104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17786883770971856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450492964503874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17928077860378808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536052584292164,0.14447337570009486,0.0,0.15154251482715744,0.0,0.0812809531812602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3725893855750325,0.0,0.08398619419857728,0.0,0.09135896713486956,0.13483100467036682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814692445595399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32223112096225404,0.2838936145996858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366654537636227,0.0,0.0,0.21460618397257192,0.0,0.16149681553966622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17085375067055572,0.0,0.2383908839176445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089295974585296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144507547388492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16159998489085256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638662424581005,0.0,0.12375460913185952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567532314862745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679637013712642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373568236151113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913993769773332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16325128218895432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,edgyarthoenightmare,2020/03/19,"Feeling useless in quarantine So basiaclly everything in my country is closed and i stay at  home 90% of the time. School is not even trying, no online lessons, just loads of overwhelming assignments. I exercise less, because i have no motivation to do this alone. I spend  my days trying to do homework and cooking food that i don't even want to eat. The only  thing that brings me joy is horse riding, but i can't do it every day.  Some ideas what can i do to feel less useless? Even therapy is canceled. That's not a serious problem and i don't know if this is it's place, but maybe you could help?",3.783632119514472,5.1844434789915965,4.738095238095241,84.64301587301587,72.19327731092437,8.314098972922503,29.188608776844074,8.841846274778883,2.2595370681605966,470,19,95,9,9,153,79,119,0.071,0.79,0.139,0.7212,0,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,2,5,6,0,1,3,0,15,4,0,1,0,20,20,7,0,4,6,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,9,4,3,0,6,2,1,2,7,5,0,0,0,2,12,1,9,19,3,11,0,3,0,0,2,5,0,2,3,66,21,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039462170790404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003853542391114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722188679832955,0.0,0.0,0.2539898409855425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20149484842429394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3901846836853812,0.0,0.16591073366466647,0.0,0.17697594839391462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19913390555053606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23811234185215485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198905031002406,0.0,0.19752341161440373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22229487962487415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822021695179404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19782919831581647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14976395241503376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057359419128263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884225979620921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929011834736074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20988690161798867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251913006388173,0.0,0.13082264326182755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148236566349455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267386899324682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614651626840936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leadman123,2020/03/19,"Free social emotional lessons and songs (posted daily) School psychologist posting daily social emotional videos while kids aren’t in school 


https://youtu.be/rEvfjsTpJiE",13.708030303030306,19.45266222727273,7.651818181818182,53.26439393939396,63.09090909090909,10.206060606060607,34.60606060606061,9.725611199111238,5.622951515151517,147,6,12,4,3,38,18,22,0.0,0.735,0.265,0.6705,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,4,0,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5459011810938373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4647866569221964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4911531083921428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4947058602282551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HappyE65,2020/03/19,"Need advice I am a overall happy person but I am emotionally numb to other people. I was not always like this, I have been through a lot stuff that can break people. I lived  through lots a chaos In my 18 years of life. I just need some advice on how to get my empathy back so I can feel human again.",-0.14773809523809334,2.0948657142857168,2.09077380952381,94.09901785714287,90.2698412698413,4.419841269841268,15.811507936507935,5.985473137389443,-0.5617920634920632,232,5,51,2,8,78,47,63,0.174,0.7879999999999999,0.038,-0.8578,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,7,2,0,1,0,10,11,3,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,9,2,7,9,3,6,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,3,4,40,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4477984454449542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19065114205000824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17618370944841275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577358498505159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585296281129832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970885001129107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24390883020049514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16183843178794394,0.11193936366468256,0.0,0.20232240818606329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3895893715015292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3397879715740213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.317694162753866,0.2000639383326462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622943903793699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14754959709759394
mentalhealth,RhymeWithWolf,2020/03/19,"If you text “Home” to 741741 when feeling sad, anxious, or are in emotional crisis, a crisis worker will text you back immediately and continue to text with you. I tried it today, it works, and was very helpful. I hope this knowledge can help others!",6.202971014492757,7.1950461086956565,6.5508695652173925,75.40644927536233,66.17391304347827,8.742028985507247,30.55072463768116,8.841846274778883,2.5074289855072482,195,7,34,3,3,63,37,46,0.228,0.57,0.20199999999999999,-0.5455,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,0,2,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,8,6,5,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,1,4,4,0,5,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,3,4,24,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3618262079662807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462762119149165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36027285936128073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619436263977656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4293550190342237,0.0,0.3212678171189413,0.31811116142691864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30358880623195666,0.0,0.0,0.21744968044582555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642652523819929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331682809214901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ATLfalcons17,2020/03/19,"When I was 15 I was raped by two of my friends... It has left a lasting impact that still causes me problems almost 10 years later. I’ve never been able to tell anyone because I feel so much shame. I’m a male too and i woke up and couldn’t move i was in so much pain. They held me down. I don’t know what to do because it’s to the point where I can’t live with the guilt. This isn’t how things were supposed to be. Most days i just feel hopeless and idk if this has contributed to it in addition to a history of mental illness. I’ve had numerous head traumas. I abused drugs for about a year or so very heavily to suppress all of my feelings before i decided to clean up a little and act like things were fine. I just don’t know what to do and struggle to keep going. I see no value in life. A typical four year degree has taken me nearly 8 years due too all my time off and medical withdrawal. Even if I did graduate it’s not like people are looking to hire right now. I have a gf but we’re constantly fighting because of my decisions. I’m just fucking miserable and i don’t know what to do.

TL,dr: I’m extremely depressed from things that have happened. I hate my life and love the chaos in the world going on right now. I wish i could press a redo button.",0.9997043628013778,2.895555152985075,3.0038805970149265,91.88537887485649,81.42537313432835,6.212629161882894,22.247990815155,7.321109707123232,0.7357969001148112,983,32,219,14,26,331,155,268,0.174,0.7559999999999999,0.07,-0.9790000000000001,0,0,1,0,3,2,23.0,0,0,1,0,16,18,4,4,12,0,25,10,1,2,3,40,47,17,0,6,8,0,4,2,2,0,6,0,1,1,14,10,0,3,8,0,0,4,9,13,0,2,11,6,27,5,31,33,5,36,0,3,2,3,7,17,1,5,17,146,41,2,0.12647516888039184,0.1498523937506012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664661233341898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843437877531934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312942671482321,0.0,0.1076210533808634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299248376288381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667472643280326,0.0,0.10098013097283616,0.0,0.0,0.08156602089818711,0.0,0.10893287763080108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466710426926343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353565622977259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19184893661865626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977144017417694,0.11692425563620222,0.0,0.0,0.14375750619227454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184157415027092,0.0,0.0,0.12486804503429802,0.1298000113583874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241694128387818,0.0,0.0,0.20852233561574995,0.1030941430534444,0.0,0.0,0.13741564104989545,0.0,0.17866630419065435,0.12357875801483345,0.12676134543719672,0.11167989125389484,0.0,0.10620728827429067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114148777834828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741042678438605,0.1274572229542441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442308888921975,0.1859476030930654,0.0,0.09754544718739933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13457849685116444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768195739277712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955991497929082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101965577388217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160182063505448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078433480235677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10100323324251677,0.0,0.0,0.13221930721702296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054487222018544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25207344702084433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374868806052236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354786243533533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10435525987753164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454402024725368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32578344843070883
mentalhealth,Gamers-best-friend-Y,2020/03/19,"Student,15 years old,Separated parents (10 years),Depressed,1 friend that is losing interest,Controlling Mother and Brother,Grandmother shames me everyday and tips to battle this other than suicide (do not mention religion) I'm in desperate need of help, 3rd year with Depression and i'm 15 15!!",8.5125,11.622831916666673,7.773333333333332,60.70500000000001,63.16666666666666,12.3,41.16666666666667,11.698219412168324,6.498691666666668,244,14,30,9,4,76,43,48,0.317,0.584,0.099,-0.9199,1,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,1,0,5,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,5,3,1,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,5,0,4,0,2,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3540279615025203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718686108093331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24387016330952466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115733299693157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3531312569912075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340502415391151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.331221245982572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504916201128924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34526952292198315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4065360957860499
mentalhealth,valkyriethebadass,2020/03/19,"Isolation during covid-19 tanking my mental health and friendships Loneliness is my biggest trigger for my depression and PTSD. So the shelter in place that went into effect in my county is really causing my mental health to go down the drain.  I’ve been trying to talk to my friends, but for one reason or another (usually valid reasons) the FaceTimes and phone calls end up not working. I feel so alone and lost and I don’t know what to do.

Note: I am keeping myself busy playing music/playing video games/playing with my dog/reading/writing but I can’t seem to find anything to equal that people time I would usually have.",4.096899766899767,6.645564564102568,4.493224553224554,81.7929370629371,74.2991452991453,6.6477078477078475,31.14918414918415,7.686295010490155,2.4018615384615387,502,24,83,7,11,158,82,117,0.111,0.8370000000000001,0.052000000000000005,-0.7795,0,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,3,0,9,2,0,5,0,22,16,10,0,1,4,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,7,2,0,2,3,2,0,1,3,1,13,2,14,12,1,13,0,2,0,0,4,7,0,2,4,55,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716451518921677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737811944415987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363807578929032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16922772931776445,0.0,0.0,0.17024922519910848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274205266535406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467866082249516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379750787889231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514732057374596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804173159603915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418754909553337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3523241267775796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473074548494634,0.0,0.0,0.0910802653882764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180912663976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33403148851307346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230218697017227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489554716786635,0.0,0.17315141955106386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19372820713195374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617017256386488,0.3407938081511981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087335981291908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332066064659337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663785024402308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251903959261404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650539231974052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536323441447728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12065260789970758,0.0,0.0,0.11772905056771045,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AirsGaming,2020/03/19,"My psychiatrist appointment was moved to be over the phone, my therapists can’t see me, and my autism analysis was pushed back. There have been so many changes all at once and I’m going crazy. I don’t know what to do, I’ve been feeling extremely anxious and depressed and my usual resources aren’t available to me because of Covid-19. I’m supposed to graduate high school this year but with everything going on I’m not sure what will happen to my class. And with this autism analysis being pushed back indefinitely I may not even have it done before I start college. I can’t stand everything that is going on right now. I just want it to end.",4.262880000000003,6.104238528000003,4.6722,83.82910000000003,71.72,8.200000000000001,28.5,8.841846274778883,2.2222000000000004,516,20,100,10,10,163,80,125,0.069,0.9079999999999999,0.023,-0.6566,1,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,1,0,17,0,0,0,2,18,29,7,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,2,0,0,6,6,1,0,0,5,2,12,1,13,20,1,20,0,1,1,0,1,6,0,2,7,66,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21405933219676387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913980264435052,0.0,0.11550571634981002,0.0,0.1612341760781007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20044552633658533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16319950623845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19390461009110005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782371794029358,0.0,0.0,0.12515025900820434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3405861896554632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580716862681897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32305885797167844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755721573900906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20019683265629848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413367372740262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921037566966242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20138806768806927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20179083196941852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618155389891046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19176465124186287,0.15099163846622327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411546153504536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785833796861792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200017737320816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086862942762132,0.0,0.11176066515424317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220194010314061
mentalhealth,Wild_Pigeon,2020/03/19,"How often can I take xanax without getting addicted? So even before the pandemic I've been in a really bad place mentally. When things would start to get really bad in my head, I would take 0.5 to 1 mg of xanax. I have strived to have at least 2 days between using it. 

But with the pandemic happening, the fact that my country will most likely face an economic collapse and the possibility of my mother dying to the virus ( the only person I still try to live for) is putting me in a state of a continuous low profile mental breakdown.

I'm tempted to take xanax every day ( at least 0.5mg) to cope with this, but the last thing I need is to get addicted to a potentially dangerous drug in times like this. What is your experience with it?",7.7996256157635475,6.330799248275862,8.438916256157636,71.4541379310345,63.41379310344828,12.147783251231527,35.886699507389174,11.20814326018867,3.8762216748768465,581,22,113,14,7,196,93,145,0.092,0.885,0.023,-0.8273,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,0,6,6,1,0,12,0,10,8,2,2,1,15,21,6,1,3,3,1,0,2,0,3,6,0,0,1,8,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,1,0,10,2,24,17,3,18,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,2,10,76,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.326472598628553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500496095198974,0.0,0.0,0.1274158353314116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19313698130462412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554041912661029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736483042725372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890040177182216,0.0,0.12616055091688932,0.0,0.0,0.14647229651049173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346954539776339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241263811742907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367417762328314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205628863753905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630864674734942,0.0,0.13222121682342206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018009584846658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102867810411468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388234098439964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074526744710185,0.15644412631908594,0.0,0.0,0.16880686600268105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15052784241762082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185173221178345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10598518240988863,0.0,0.11958079697682132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33775256153960165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19895827571559696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731331276393209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016621341538461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293253786235353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14434189153636615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127388675899284,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kiwiorapples,2020/03/19,"Weight loss and body image issues’ effect on mental health I used to be somewhat overweight up until three years ago when I was able to go back to a healthy BMI. Growing up I was always told how important it is to not be overweight in order to be well accepted into society. This made me feel very self conscious and that ‘I am not worth people’s time’.  My boyfriend recently told me that I am ‘the limit to what he would date in terms of body size’ which has kind of brought back old insecurities. He tells me he loves me but I have this irrational fear that he will find someone who is ‘prettier’ than me and that he would never want to marry someone like me who’s not ‘perfect’. I know this is total nonsense but I am always having those irrational thoughts. I also feel inferior to anyone who is skinnier than me. For people who have gone through weight loss or struggle with body image issues, how do you overcome the constant striving for perfection?",6.397362146050668,6.775518284153009,6.3735916542473925,78.99827123695978,65.6120218579235,8.840337804272231,32.48335817188276,8.575989854853784,2.53556174863388,758,29,139,10,11,240,113,183,0.16699999999999998,0.743,0.09,-0.9395,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,6,7,13,0,3,3,0,20,9,3,5,4,32,33,11,0,3,6,0,4,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,15,5,4,1,8,0,1,4,4,6,1,1,8,4,17,7,23,19,3,24,0,3,0,1,15,6,0,2,14,98,32,0,0.12954648661428073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483514399583185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035982785415838,0.215586109231503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09058191554654872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992265035579695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4316908273907374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399937297975227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577581350820382,0.1310051921371574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11840314183296552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736242537428513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377018574041606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704257495828852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349027306583155,0.07119536110989749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328986971394372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692076200191302,0.12258001793743795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055238884836368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999142367645068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359372456370415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17962244478897654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791152692700758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351452385776104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21952863542808265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543011536705746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322933929341322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028454398887636,0.07553959813003593,0.0,0.0,0.2475744391053316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118865705582541,0.0,0.10688941866240388,0.0764098742388347,0.0,0.0,0.31550544133900865,0.11647784937383568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18405221444100894,0.0,0.0,0.08342369003119429
mentalhealth,Haralyst,2020/03/19,"Quarantine and getting help. What are alternative options for in person therapy? Hey all! I live in America, and have been struggling to find a therapist. I have a super weird work schedule, insurance that basically nobody takes (as is wildly too expensive), and now I’m stuck in my house on quarantine. I have severe anxiety, which comes with some DPDR and depression. And with my work being cancelled and me being stuck in the house, everything is worse!

I’ve tried a multitude of pills, and I’m actually on Duloxetine right now. It doesn’t seem to help much, and I’ll be seeing my psychologist soon about alternatives. I have my medical marijuana card, which works wonders for me, but is more of a bandaid. I think the one thing that’s really going to help me, is a therapist. 

But with everything going on, what should I do with therapy? I know about online therapy, but what’s the effectiveness of it? What about books and other self help aspects? Is it worth it to brave social contact to do in person? What’s the best way to get help with everything going on? What’s worked for you?",4.49514705882353,6.607664887254906,5.748823529411768,75.21970588235294,71.69607843137254,9.898039215686277,28.66666666666667,10.194018383442646,3.290713725490196,863,34,154,26,17,288,110,204,0.07200000000000001,0.7809999999999999,0.147,0.9712,0,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,0,7,7,6,0,1,9,0,18,3,0,1,1,28,34,13,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,16,15,0,0,6,1,2,4,1,3,0,1,3,1,15,3,30,27,5,19,0,1,1,0,12,10,0,4,4,110,31,5,0.0,0.0,0.11164850805141552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875240046653552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200671525915866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855483643221724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854191724075624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.308475346107995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456946516641832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954991798387295,0.0,0.19506700712454755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3834359823688736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640295726179662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628772236812319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102689693645096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525691788248844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410515591636579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775277685008146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997983224877905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329453488211288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770626038558387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117065293105188,0.10415536177957793,0.11935549259144836,0.12925172069531254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166274768914533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11960708569151005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860227378642587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925164127412996,0.2656796834697613,0.07600950020833952,0.07330986769029793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767747261936328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081402557542187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407371129435922,0.33316991259493484,0.0,0.11659445395027405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,user_7061,2020/03/19,"I think I am a sociopath. I think I am a sociopath.

I’ve never been diagnosed, no. To begin I consider myself a very like-able person, very charismatic and attractive. I’d never say that to you in person because that feels like I’m just bragging, but this is anonymous so I don’t care. I’ve never had problems getting along with people, and can talk to essentially anyone very well. I’m well spoken, usually judging by someone’s appearance I’ll even throw on a different persona if they’re a stranger and speak in terms that seem relevant to them, or about things that appeal to them. Every relationship I’ve ever had I’ve broken the woman. I’ve caused them to lose all of their friends, lose bonds with family, and worse. Unintentionally of course, but I can’t say I don’t find pleasure in being able to control things like that. When I can’t control things in their life, I get furious. I lash out a lot and say many hurtful things in fits of rage, which are usually short lived. Afterwards, I can see that I’ve hurt the person, but I don’t feel any remorse usually. It sounds bad, but I don’t realize it until I think back on it. I’ve never been broken up with, I think if I had I’d lose my mind, I’ve never said I love you first, and I’m not sure if I ever will. Every time a woman has told me they love me, it’s been within the first month of talking, usually within the first week. I always say it back of course, even if I don’t feel it because I want to keep their interests and make them feel special. The list goes on, and if you have any questions feel free to ask.

Can anyone confirm my suspicions? I think I could be a sociopath.",3.653035714285714,4.6602468035714315,4.971190476190476,84.35714285714286,72.03571428571428,7.980952380952381,26.5,8.344100000000001,1.6403535714285713,1290,42,267,20,24,430,158,336,0.18100000000000002,0.698,0.122,-0.9798,1,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,3,8,8,12,23,2,0,13,0,26,4,0,4,9,59,54,21,0,8,12,0,5,2,1,1,2,7,0,5,18,13,0,3,14,0,1,2,14,9,2,3,8,13,40,15,33,42,3,40,0,5,1,2,31,14,0,10,26,171,58,0,0.07802546291204046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649234356323309,0.0,0.0,0.10611998077463676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911443570094784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294327515949275,0.0,0.0,0.11999352950992535,0.06514800240579066,0.09512719597003236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955215956333363,0.08015364351360398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750243825912606,0.0622969831455631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919420243262965,0.0,0.08152000186984185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307016475547227,0.14115699649198996,0.13147963542803062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355546234510209,0.0,0.1972600922558656,0.05574140629458636,0.0,0.0,0.07131385955116057,0.1991052566809662,0.0,0.0,0.06028227909531319,0.0,0.08153016797864049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670557436166944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935261648968745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05511169194185009,0.11435789988137315,0.0,0.06889791324407905,0.0,0.0,0.26187160457432623,0.0,0.06633445835085856,0.14084205319115325,0.0,0.05208260237143599,0.07910557281215133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878347498195365,0.0,0.062279180090053225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008902355748824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409303166122048,0.20438647389717454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465983043788517,0.0,0.0,0.0874063754275445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377014695318692,0.0,0.0,0.07422008288057133,0.24819591928168844,0.0,0.0,0.0621761919501585,0.07103145100367685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611072152317443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735380754011739,0.0,0.0,0.12542782307338565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20734660213800907,0.2499778305196404,0.0,0.0,0.04549727488816223,0.0,0.0,0.07455667352020963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34373609617297224,0.1931375351698711,0.04602143959555792,0.0,0.06258731992466826,0.0,0.1403085232786328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951461260915328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AstroFarlen,2020/03/19,"Wanting to try Zoloft Hello, I have very bad obsessive thoughts and social anxiety. I have been taking Atomoxetine for 3 months and this medication doesn’t seem to be helping me. I was looking into trying Zoloft, does anyone have success stories with Zoloft?",8.05,9.666015333333334,7.828888888888893,65.65000000000002,62.33333333333334,9.555555555555557,37.22222222222222,9.725611199111238,4.055222222222222,210,10,30,4,3,67,36,45,0.158,0.721,0.121,-0.1953,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,7,4,0,0,0,7,12,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,1,4,1,5,8,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,1,19,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22778004554288844,0.0,0.0,0.20819565209150506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24861111650719375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605654457989664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995773979051847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500373264939753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999545793726465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23766341139516656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27106292885475336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035214407688413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22387301887479602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363824312290627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4043091565232878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456772092511679,0.17562229168369808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tj-throwawayyyy,2020/03/19,"Anyone interested in making a subreddit focused on mental health support during social distancing? I have no clue how to do it, so I’m seeing if anyone else would be interested in the idea and moderating? I’ve just found that personally a lot of my depression and anxiety that I’ve been pretty recovered from and coping with healthily is very quickly regressing through this and I’m sure many others are experiencing worsening or new mental health problems like this. Maybe a community focused on talking about activities that we still can do during this time and just overall support so that maybe less people lose their minds stuck alone at home, with toxic family when back from college, stuck taking care of children and feeling inferior for not being able to entertain them, etc.?",12.015869565217393,10.309489572463773,11.251014492753622,55.36391304347828,55.44927536231884,14.127536231884058,44.01449275362319,12.745084868956482,5.876179710144927,643,29,93,17,6,209,102,138,0.149,0.659,0.192,0.7974,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,2,1,10,12,0,0,4,0,10,2,0,2,1,24,22,12,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,1,2,9,9,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,4,3,5,8,16,15,3,11,0,3,1,0,7,5,0,3,7,66,14,1,0.14564180660894646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084098837614812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114155834166892,0.0,0.0,0.20367227504329816,0.14922724202329773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198955935007114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849152835540794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12544107462125578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216650410733352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242911304187835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729813348206188,0.0,0.07364087346813641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15968872360215325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096208598147913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14609060693583906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644118720798715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115323005732127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16293592786406078,0.0,0.12381945577863547,0.0,0.0,0.09721703683863436,0.14765793251601975,0.29263354065600383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935453714866449,0.0,0.14705670686295708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140661764374461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096969068900416,0.1271688078645724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817007649591088,0.0,0.13935953956914307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605766355906272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846348073263144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630973489109575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3305451924126788,0.13726567912894946,0.0,0.109504513223457,0.1170613673386886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849249086540602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016974329627575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10345976074742426,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KRBurke8,2020/03/19,"Is it normal to be tired after work at twenty-two? I started working a new job in January and I thought I would be used to it by now but all I do is lay in bed exhausted after work. And today is my day off but my shoulders and back are still so tired so I'm still in bed. It's a more physically demanding job (working full time in a grocery store) than I'm used to and I'm coming off working around a hundred-twenty hours a week for four years (oh college). I figured it would take a while to feel well-rested again but it's been a really long time so I'm nervous perhaps my mental health is in a worse place than I thought. Any input would be most appreciated, thank you!",0.9691008991009014,2.8894047762237776,3.1642007992008025,90.56959790209793,81.65734265734265,5.764035964035964,22.801698301698302,6.868970318607317,0.6247166833166835,525,18,116,6,14,179,82,143,0.138,0.8009999999999999,0.061,-0.868,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,5,9,3,0,1,8,0,13,5,1,2,1,21,26,11,0,4,3,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,2,0,5,6,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,3,1,10,1,19,17,4,30,0,0,0,0,1,11,0,1,18,76,15,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283765843639477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12153092832626933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497474863736883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759910248504753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880435151218208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902815071884638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145113402180393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444379788732785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27094825090209823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081509317558173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13757912685926665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185098185751962,0.0,0.0,0.13375971639745848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263338598597752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745762086595922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662891018759599,0.0,0.2180486333749295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026453610229562,0.0,0.0,0.12568843046400313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21676180644672488,0.1592107512655521,0.3138172081649203,0.12940412870378515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333593078933172,0.0,0.0,0.2358173116627006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950737433613343,0.0,0.12274705163695168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.496937594776654,0.0,0.13912460956410475,0.29093772066537604,0.0,0.0,0.08791381402603628
mentalhealth,Dadjocks,2020/03/19,"Will never be able to break out of nativity and confusion in life I believe the short and sharp answer of addressing nativity is being a bit dumb in all honesty. 

I'm a 26 year old man that has struggled with very poor mental health issues my whole life and have witnessed more generational emotional and physical trauma than most people I've come across. Through adulthood I have heavily consumed alcohol and drugs to better my positive emotional state when it rarely comes across. This cycle usually leads to going too hard and end up in some of the worst mental states of my life. These cycles correlate closely with nativity because at times I have always questioned myself with decision making and feel at times I have lost connection with reality and almost always seek other opinions because I can't understand why close people around me would lie and want to see me hurt. At times I do the same and can identify the hypocrisy that is present and feel ashamed. Since the age of 18 I have always had issues with relationships and women because I witnessed regular domestic violence towards my Mother and feel the need over compensate and pledge myself to a partner. My understanding of women in relationships has grown into a truly murky perception and feel that extravagant efforts to be happy and keep the peace is dramatically artificial and delusional at times. I have a fear of getting hurt and can plot ridiculous thoughts of infidelity amongst friends and past partners. I have spent many times in my life blocking out volatile and truth based insults because I can't handle the ongoing pain in my life. At times I will literally pretend to turn off my hearing and zone out to try combat these certain situations. I am at stage where I am not entirely sure if I'm hearing what I want to hear, what I don't want to or having no idea how to operate. A lot of of my problems have been underlining since a child but definetly have to take blame for heightening these issues with the use of alcohol and drugs. Through ageing I have tried to cease nativity and try assess problems without focusing on the hurt involved. A large part of my confidence to combat difficult situations is pondered on whilst under the influence of alcohol and drugs and eventually poorly acted on. I have improved my life slowly but tend to ruin any good work made by abusing substances because the feeling of happiness is illusive and I feel it needs to be bolstered. As I am writing this, I have been awake for 3 days drinking ridiculous amounts of alcohol and indulging in drugs. 

I commonly live a life of ruminating impulsive good and depressing thoughts and try persisting to be a good person but have always ended up lost. I have observed how my family and friends acknowledge me differently in certain situations and find it hard to accept but have to keep moving in a forward direction. I believe I am naive but sincerely don't know what to believe in at the best of times because I don't know how to make my own decisions in tricky situations.",12.774098854731767,9.338254028933092,11.707848101265828,58.02565400843886,55.726943942133815,15.234960819770947,48.57564798071127,13.179699484607868,6.345546353224832,2470,123,396,65,21,798,275,553,0.142,0.7390000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.7102,1,0,9,0,1,0,22.0,0,0,0,8,7,36,4,4,24,0,46,18,0,9,6,111,85,43,0,9,9,1,9,0,4,3,17,3,1,7,15,46,5,3,22,2,3,8,9,21,0,0,9,13,44,15,86,68,13,71,0,7,1,0,19,39,1,9,22,273,59,3,0.05844892248602593,0.06925241550740667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24985649074069746,0.05852815294039437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945367430157226,0.0,0.0,0.039747271589452855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520319329037371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21377952386517987,0.0,0.0,0.19755576099846148,0.061338538137130284,0.05169332213758537,0.06381108521653768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006971426008448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03769471964477317,0.0,0.05034197129116903,0.0,0.0,0.06106668377888987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05725769229911624,0.27112877511612377,0.0,0.0,0.13149434157377635,0.1035367935266095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05510044229893619,0.06577128756449899,0.1773211884153303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05342125626071624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031498504776507,0.0,0.030537149608636724,0.0,0.0332178696047558,0.14707254927280194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443992967934388,0.10471750801820638,0.0,0.0,0.06212847140780998,0.1976285507401394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18771234117197716,0.06598171905942643,0.0,0.18301646870583416,0.0,0.1039041757426933,0.0,0.0,0.0642439984538847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28898941744312273,0.0,0.0,0.051611469389061325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760780675391326,0.049691183744371516,0.0,0.05530578369210032,0.07803021924548716,0.059258033479691385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780553306526105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062121954628488935,0.0,0.08667827083956116,0.04507941228299845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061332311982032824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06219377448057396,0.0,0.0,0.06329448724644984,0.05579611014634575,0.0810422468922752,0.05103534463476047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185545023944728,0.0,0.0,0.06547616984865932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255045377027621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04657622381385814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669910534987974,0.2627961511525856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06110350440403287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055087417728494695,0.0,0.043946315651337685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280383129181566,0.2385742571476973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15873192671990044,0.06357564363419284,0.0,0.12169477923983164,0.0,0.05048110265821565,0.06437323051678709,0.048226482317325216,0.1034240665248651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05274106139530741,0.0652561346242905,0.0,0.0563426755218661,0.0,0.04255151169313393,0.0,0.0,0.041520437552561434,0.0,0.0,0.03763918975780246
mentalhealth,danioffo,2020/03/19,"Maybe i wasn'n meant for this life I don't know how to start,i don't know what to say. One thing is clear,somewhere God made a major mistake and send me down-here. All my life i was the ""stupid"" one, the guy that can't do something nice. Being this way made me feel uncomfortable about anything,from eye-contact to talking. 2 years ago i met a girl (i was 16) and i thought i saw an angel,she made me feel nice about myself,she help me a lot going thru family problems and,the most important,she made me forget about my ilness. But,unfortunately,after 7 months, she break-up with me and that shit made me feel like i was nobody. And here I am,2 years later,in the same family full of screams,with my arms wounded,nobody trusts me,i don't have enough courage to talk to someone. Every day seems so hard and my mind always is filling with negative thoughts about suicide,running away,going back to the place where i came from. I was never diagnosed,but i know something is not wrong. Being sad all the time has become a lifestyle. I don't know if im stupid,depressive or tired. I just wanna go,and i'd love to see if somebody cares.",3.4904812834224583,4.650294610389615,4.2167710720651925,89.03255156608101,72.5930735930736,6.820575502928443,24.41074611662847,7.048011613610866,0.7953079195314491,889,25,189,8,17,284,137,231,0.134,0.762,0.105,-0.6428,0,0,2,0,0,1,40.0,0,0,0,0,10,13,2,0,10,0,17,6,2,6,3,41,40,10,0,5,5,0,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,2,6,8,0,0,11,0,0,4,8,6,0,2,15,7,26,7,18,23,8,16,0,1,2,1,10,3,1,6,9,103,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005953129349884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09442645939193846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662046363032726,0.08726097156757585,0.0,0.0,0.1253324104785912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979364963471302,0.11570288434962847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731867689085348,0.0,0.09774223695009664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172576694945665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561382830939744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21396224061581376,0.0,0.17214035495471625,0.08107185928565024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19348401335577048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123654316078928,0.0,0.0,0.10165795278794187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606487004373184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258048087439155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494678678028948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031197026106286,0.05544177529589639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647869027181204,0.10242230934640233,0.5368990204096683,0.0,0.0,0.11400833800533383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458488800975612,0.0,0.09058058022437863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752463369881701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15379724144203594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856496920135348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858734412910903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024577051813584,0.0,0.0,0.09043079139520004,0.10331012766688903,0.0,0.0,0.11648806725557218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615328117618993,0.17472861319866212,0.0,0.0,0.08032343676871699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18242573158220704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539267337036566,0.0,0.0,0.1801847213240266,0.06617250824495023,0.13043134103465248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007705811627764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240752050164828,0.0,0.14615790798649705
mentalhealth,shattered_soul123,2020/03/19,"My behaviour will soon land me up in jail, need help ASAP!n 20M here and there are alot of things that aren't working out in my life, to keep this really short and simple; I have anger issues, like real bad one where I blackout and break things. This has being going on for a long time, since childhood I was a destructive kid with a bad temper.

I had a really nice and loving childhood but when I get upset or mad, I just loose it, I yell, I break stuff, punch the walls till my knuckles bleed etc.
When I get mad, I want to break something or someone, I don't get the satisfaction by meditation at all but instead it fuels me up even more.

Since I started dating this girl things have been going downhill, I've been someone I never thought I would become, I am ashamed of myself to say this but this is the only place where people would understand.
So the relationship was bad from the start,I loved her dearly but she cheated (long story) I forgave her but I was still pretty mad about it.

So I had her Instagram account without her knowing and saw that she was lying to me again, in a fit of rage I hit her twice but I regret that. I never wanted to hit a women but now I've crossed that line, I even threatened and blackmail her that I'll leak her nudes etc. 
  
(Ik this sounds really really bad but this is not me, I'm not in control when I'm mad, I blackout)

Today I was in an argument with her, I snapped and I broke my 10k piano and broke the baseball bat itself, my face was red like blood from the anger and to scare my girlfriend, I grabbed my dog and put a knife on it's throat and told my girlfriend to apologize otherwise I'll slit my dogs throat.

Then it suddenly hit me with what the fuck I am doing? What have I become in past few months, I threw the knife away and sat down and reflected about the things  I could've done. I love my dog to death but at that moment, it wasn't me. 

Idk what treatment I should get, it feels like a curse and I bet one day I'll end up killing somebody.

Ik I am a piece of shit and deserve to be behind bars and I'll readily do my time if I feel I've started to become dangerous. I wanna know the root cause of this? Why am I defective? Why cant I live a normal life? Why do I get this murderous rage?

Please I don't want torments from people saying mean things, I just want help. I don't wanna hurt anyone at all. I feel my personality changing too these days as I've become more short tempered ,irrational and aggressive.",2.3292333348563083,3.9714940117878186,3.6316196829168033,90.10903412984877,76.4656188605108,6.542349339790744,22.64271028464385,7.3071595529392575,0.7074819847398001,1928,55,416,23,43,630,242,509,0.254,0.647,0.099,-0.9986,0,0,1,0,1,0,52.0,0,0,0,2,21,38,18,3,23,0,37,14,6,3,4,70,73,37,3,13,17,0,4,3,2,4,3,4,0,4,33,21,1,2,9,1,2,5,11,30,0,3,17,10,73,8,48,47,9,61,0,4,2,5,26,25,2,5,31,278,106,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056096301594804825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537552825704019,0.0,0.2679434278537029,0.0,0.3544158907545735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241481398088818,0.08486910137050642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998094971771525,0.06405440916283131,0.0,0.0,0.10347903545108236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209966224138399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105695193383027,0.0,0.1789477239557878,0.10597782063219653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169493310452527,0.057313896529503965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416819565816837,0.20957542705621984,0.0,0.09118924716333812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754839298445099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588423077905426,0.0,0.0,0.08373572316323513,0.0,0.0713090851087185,0.08875884240594056,0.0,0.08818087859754954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333283530121,0.11758398786162222,0.0,0.07084155447928478,0.14199602653805646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21722290663802185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739028275999558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403610387508868,0.0,0.0,0.059487004715587426,0.1237513939805408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860503079566887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872723606194877,0.061015941744424436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658536413424162,0.11123804100720988,0.07005076953067182,0.08381971792317078,0.08806471130056794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161929056542364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064988816067298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913154305902696,0.2055808480053052,0.0,0.0,0.0861333406151002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759881910386384,0.08032081868318139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235144836242192,0.13272853923421676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595146964342253,0.06176235345933648,0.0,0.0,0.17035439366090555,0.0,0.06406906355296188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918402588831526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664949292335185,0.0,0.0,0.06369095617861736,0.09356154710319113,0.0,0.07604543277905007,0.07665995093733957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351871624091209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892789007280425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171760745251818,0.0,0.0,0.07733557607908159,0.0,0.058405917705260185,0.0,0.0,0.11398134460038932,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shadowanon1,2020/03/19,"I think I'm losing my mind again. I think I need to talk to someone for real I just can't help but think I don't really have a bright and meaningful future anyway. I'm not cut out for this world. Sometimes I like to hold on to hope but then again, in times like these, I see no point in it. It's all just too dark. I feel like I'll be stuck here forever because I'm stupid and a loser. I might as well just die and it's the only true way to get unstuck.",-0.2751456310679572,1.3067207572815531,2.0600097087378657,98.63875242718449,84.14563106796116,5.285048543689321,16.125242718446604,6.2581,-0.6909953398058253,350,6,90,3,10,119,68,103,0.223,0.568,0.21,-0.3769,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,2,9,11,2,0,3,0,5,0,0,0,2,23,17,7,1,2,6,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,1,3,10,7,12,14,1,12,0,2,2,0,2,6,0,2,8,53,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310215743534651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230672227282617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867692495683463,0.15354866155612532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229397499774016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406551286190794,0.0,0.0,0.21347763778866288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150172130992616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24045580628421714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280106652555796,0.2170217427290553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593705978332724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16346674638706465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20318179715341272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446415790163431,0.13769201696371314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17127431274604904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821126067531427,0.0,0.2125749020627712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17275554776133564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4131624640986773,0.0,0.0,0.12532955531491335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706043481984861,0.0,0.0,0.1932511878198066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jennuxs,2020/03/19,"What can I take to help with my anxiety/stress? I started a job at an endodontist as a dental assistant a few months ago. I was doing pretty great according to what everyone else was telling me... until they moved me to a different location. And at this location they're very up tight about how they want things done and it's been really overwhelming. I've had anxiety problems in the past and now they're back. I've kinda been threatened with being written up because I can't seem to do anything they ask of me right. My anxiety doesn't help because it makes me really panicky. I think once I can get that under control i'll feel more confident and it'll help me improve greatly. I'm also pretty quiet because of my anxiety issues so it probably doesn't help my case at all. I would hate to lose this job because it's already helped me out a lot financially. 

So is there anything over the counter I could take that really helps with anxiety/stress?",4.929740847387908,6.070489962566848,5.92160427807487,78.22819827231594,69.16042780748663,9.818017276840807,32.0316742081448,10.035473477838034,3.3018723981900457,761,33,142,19,13,252,110,187,0.102,0.731,0.16699999999999998,0.9264,3,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,3,2,8,6,1,1,8,0,18,0,0,3,1,22,31,10,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,12,8,0,2,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,7,3,21,2,22,20,4,18,0,2,0,0,11,10,0,3,7,95,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904228698269264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329731061693013,0.08935078650313619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25642042512851504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838892517953056,0.0,0.1044528718877631,0.0,0.0,0.08591380588447321,0.0,0.2724393384304139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253151806802344,0.08920765876319188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673452135213955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143390244250746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333643941777277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067632163562203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056494263795855426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837453947769763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463663925485979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103106704708374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4493433223697767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166175430522822,0.22175042793533167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499777442967995,0.0,0.0949892181934016,0.0,0.0,0.0745809312947601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918216525097546,0.11875176758039138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898926412563138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665934038318486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273400353360556,0.12046430369199222,0.10691093437796724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21473212824215648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541717887026684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101715189446404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908337519686202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559736658619887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16801476043218025,0.0,0.09765732272313746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422873466446588,0.07159234966885336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921893081699732,0.06590150392417159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937009354526588,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ItCat420,2020/03/19,"Question about U.K. psychiatric care and medications. So I’ve recently started going through the mental health system in the U.K. for suspected PTSD due to childhood trauma. I’ve been hospitalised 4 times in less than a year due to very extreme anxiety reactions (stroke-like symptoms, loss of speech, heavy ataxia, among more symptoms) the worst episode of which took me a month to start speaking normally again. 

My most recent visit resulted in me being given a short term Diazepam prescription (incredibly rare for the U.K. from what I have seen) and have been referred to the Psychiatric Nurse.

At my initial assessment we discussed if I was on any medication and explained my GP had taken me off all antidepressants due to them being ineffective and the side effects being too restricting on my life, also my GP wants to treat my mental health as trauma-induced anxiety rather than treating depression as the primary issue. Now when we discussed Diazepam, the nurse basically said he wants me to see the resident psychiatrist about being on some kind of medication as he doesn’t feel it safe for me to be completely unmedicated but iterated that diazepam, although extremely effective at controlling my symptoms and episodes, is not available for long term prescription. He did say however that the psychiatrist can prescribe “something that is similar but isn’t as addictive”.

I like to think my pharmaceutical knowledge is pretty decent, but I have been wracking my brain trying to work out what medication this could possibly be. Beta blockers, SSRI/SNRI, TCA and TeCAs have all been ruled out as ineffective, so has anyone else been through the U.K. psychiatric teams and may be able to shed light on what they’re likely to prescribe? I can’t think of any drug that works like benzodiazepines do in regards to anxiety. 

Sorry for the long post, I realise this probably won’t get read by many people so thank you if you got this far. Any input is appreciated.",11.943643410852715,10.257197162790696,10.745279069767443,58.87103875968994,55.569767441860456,14.289612403100774,45.31705426356589,12.913307274991677,6.018203333333335,1600,77,244,44,15,507,202,344,0.061,0.8540000000000001,0.085,0.9466,1,0,2,0,0,0,39.0,2,2,1,9,11,15,0,0,15,0,32,13,1,4,2,42,51,23,0,7,7,0,1,3,0,2,12,4,0,0,12,11,0,4,10,2,0,3,5,6,0,0,14,8,25,9,49,27,9,40,0,2,2,0,17,17,0,6,21,163,37,4,0.10205421602676054,0.0,0.0,0.11125415923722616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816127196854277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20820109945914653,0.0,0.23421358777739645,0.0,0.0,0.0713586807246242,0.10456660452870137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392625644151537,0.0,0.0,0.10405107479623747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700190384134528,0.0,0.11446248112013785,0.08148198727023094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789914672234121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183504905218194,0.0,0.08525320217938119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051601678009224036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053319115741550314,0.0,0.05799976280833926,0.0,0.08162207938665786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21695771873231529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651808701421048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627376146599377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07208391088143001,0.14957560497932468,0.0,0.0,0.18062953944958174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346695700854518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4112355439955893,0.20569329269438985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145870157854604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999146354448547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075154356879454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150507946424442,0.0977397285627236,0.10382582685215366,0.11003170575302897,0.0,0.11929591725060595,0.0,0.1143240781545206,0.0,0.10208183334698352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20153245282813584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707692962176642,0.08115760874077799,0.0,0.0,0.08132399716943721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856632141528465,0.0,0.11424133954022996,0.14446899874781666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.318220218939648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395781070109806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078444172262926,0.0,0.0,0.05950863406346935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338598906732016,0.06928811366749144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420541620420373,0.12038844149229168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485933694546566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571956914232893
mentalhealth,DontDelayPostToday,2020/03/19,"Therapy culture “Go talk to a therapist“ you read hear and see everywhere especially here on reddit.   
But i have been to 4-5 and i wasnt helped in a significant way. And usually that means that you did something wrong. It is rarely the therapists fault. Man i should become a therapist. Easiest job ever since you cant do it wrong.",2.349397321428569,4.941854609375003,4.3850892857142885,79.90812500000001,81.03125,9.282142857142855,26.330357142857146,9.606745405546679,3.0493107142857143,261,11,50,9,7,89,50,64,0.124,0.7959999999999999,0.08,-0.4086,1,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,8,0,0,0,1,7,12,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,2,6,0,4,8,0,6,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,0,2,32,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20205793521872434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16549205295672634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397677686937204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062020630042941,0.0,0.1226299767556327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18155326986844555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929016224493115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18300316233034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579037393229186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15134115191711225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14084665998099322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14705121569716542,0.0,0.0,0.2092234461725769,0.6372698750204489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20149760070243453,0.0,0.0,0.14522009354205376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4000621968689073,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BunnyWithAntlers,2020/03/19,"Is it okay to be this way? (How can I help myself) My next therapy appointment isn't for a while and i'm hesitant to talk about this to my therapist. I'm posting here because it's easier to express myself on topics like this when there isn't someone looking back at me. Sometimes I get triggered by something and it feels like my mind regresses in age or I lose sanity in some way. What I mean by this is i'm unable to think straight and tend to rely on my friends a lot more to feel a sense of safety and my thoughts no longer have a filter on them which allows recurrent darker thoughts in. This normally doesn't last longer than an hour so I just accept it as part of who I am and something I can live with but last time it lasted for three days which is way longer than it has ever gone on. This has me really worried with the thought of it happening again but never ending. Thoughts during this mindset tend to revolve around being sexually abused. I tend to find an attraction to the idea of it happening to me and romantic partners that put me through it. A lot of my fantasies line up with what is called Stockholm Syndrome. At the worst parts of this feeling or mindset or whatever it is, I feel that the only useful part of me is my body and that i'd be better if I gave myself to some dark group to be used for sex as it'd be the only way I could be useful. I don't like thinking about any of this really, it gives me a lot of anxiety and sometimes I feel really guilty for some reason for having these thoughts. This is only something that started happening when I got my depression under control, me and my therapist found a lot of it was linked to gender dysphoria which is something I have been taking care of through transitioning. (Genderqueer, Biological Male, Identify as Gay going with any pronouns. I am on estrogen through HRT) I want to be clear that this isn't something caused by the HRT or medicines I have been taking as way before I was able to start this was already happening and is just as bad as it was. I stopped having major depressive symptoms after I stopped pretending to be masculine for my family and friends and started acting like myself, I quickly found out that because I had been actively playing a character for my family and friends that my real feelings and mind didn't have much time to develop. (this went on for 10 years starting at age 6, after my grandmother told me I was too much for her because of my gender problems that I could only express through frustration.) Back on the topic of the dark thoughts, the only ones that are exclusive to that broken mindset is the ones of selling myself as a slave. The attractions and fantasies stay the same outside of it but not as much or as severe.  


Background/potential cause:  
I used to put myself through mental abuse by getting boyfriends that I knew would hurt me, I am unsure why I would do this and can't think of any reasons for it but I always know when I do it.  
I am told I most likely have repressed memories of sexual assault and I feel like its true.  


I am terribly sorry if this is not the place to post this or if i'm doing something wrong, please tell me if I am. Most of what I want out of this is to know if it's okay to be like this or if i'm just a bit odd and tips for self help on this situation. I'd also like tips for how to express this to my therapist, I have been to a mental hospital once before because of the depressive symptoms I had. It was a positive thing to happen, I really was able to help myself and developed coping skills but I have severe PTSD to being sent there and often have nightmares about it. This is one of the reasons i'm scared to talk about all of this face to face with my therapist.  


Thank you for listening, any response is appreciated.",6.536632008551162,6.037328899070388,6.976932594823957,77.75302108638617,65.45418326693228,10.21486735982898,34.036504388948266,9.685265186389033,3.0798079163022707,3003,118,584,54,41,983,292,753,0.12,0.743,0.13699999999999998,0.6252,1,0,6,0,2,0,48.0,0,1,1,4,25,35,2,2,29,2,73,8,3,14,5,121,136,55,0,14,23,0,7,8,4,2,3,1,0,3,63,28,0,4,29,4,1,7,11,14,0,4,30,9,77,21,116,91,21,66,0,5,1,2,27,21,0,23,38,443,140,1,0.1031313694057409,0.1221938085794783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05690401533159688,0.041237059426716745,0.04290678051366309,0.0,0.0,0.14026573544250415,0.0,0.03944760765621017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045904391945574184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930165715349526,0.04305519282680785,0.12573585111795346,0.0,0.08775719938000844,0.0,0.0,0.04560565767876965,0.05629637230028783,0.05727785105339971,0.0,0.0,0.052654329470809114,0.0,0.05257465222730872,0.10594432522286186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783530011343761,0.08234200659457859,0.0,0.0,0.03325560071069207,0.0,0.13324034602393306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04567189114064325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04664411400490975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722307661890434,0.0,0.18251211692865987,0.07367707091008327,0.0,0.0,0.0471301016272787,0.0,0.0,0.1130782233975205,0.11951856026167858,0.0,0.05388188392420134,0.04946650348309552,0.029305966948311574,0.0,0.04124178867183114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22799682342229696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369017449505293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0507818123161448,0.0,0.055202131981281134,0.05821138143282644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056678303507079066,0.12609874623928785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201539110899837,0.0,0.04553344431977294,0.0,0.0433021880008576,0.057688811191193325,0.0,0.1753572045121808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056170147639900365,0.0,0.0,0.10393216360402856,0.0,0.1041332836511502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137201344410073,0.0,0.03977063496647969,0.0,0.05484069068144107,0.0,0.050523422577284496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05491577128666606,0.10482672745522316,0.19609013427639208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16752183448175328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387516531797458,0.05660363691925825,0.0,0.0,0.0987713437470914,0.0,0.0,0.04934139616281167,0.060277525954159625,0.10367551132813577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05869303835694303,0.13213719214191605,0.15905433638163124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05162624609400217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05379425520305112,0.11650909225128192,0.0,0.0,0.05796199012352184,0.0,0.0,0.04369143731177042,0.23818670013412946,0.10199956140456518,0.057723562280076225,0.14599382815925724,0.05496215886059355,0.0,0.08622244274023072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719298110863923,0.07754195493583269,0.08289308818149355,0.04507068127986456,0.04747475440617132,0.058969854451715674,0.2394869374593354,0.03425794961996366,0.09912362587952712,0.0,0.24562436226722265,0.06013673086099081,0.0,0.0,0.09854644306492688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17814478094094108,0.0,0.0,0.06082955371715019,0.2046522016604152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04780190633404914,0.04653000991515915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236745587366598,0.0,0.07326156584229541,0.056378981305789375,0.0,0.03320661030126576
mentalhealth,m-xt4pe,2020/03/19,"Self-quarantine and dissociation Anyone else having some serious dissociation/depersonalization due to quarantine? I live alone and haven’t seen another person in days (turns out the 2 days a week I went to class made a huge difference). I’ve made an effort to keep in touch with the few people I talk to, but I’m having a hard time being present. 
Nothing feels real and my meds aren’t making a difference anymore. Just curious if anyone else is experiencing similar feelings, I guess.",4.493320707070708,7.432104215909092,6.191515151515151,68.0878282828283,75.02272727272728,9.365656565656566,27.959595959595962,9.725611199111238,3.4156398989899,393,16,63,12,9,134,64,88,0.055,0.885,0.06,0.3291,1,3,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,7,0,6,0,0,3,0,17,17,5,0,1,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,6,5,0,8,12,2,11,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,3,6,34,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17208938249415645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17423095328284818,0.0,0.0,0.16478390141135218,0.23236281080297844,0.3404966277078052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21431608549057507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34719909697477297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776070617785366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16802876430191574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18304156254132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14884476269013616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14768869765547238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14672039200872572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3144450781854529,0.11091162964109624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18456387135911964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15943290176337602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519290551164453,0.14508259229487244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891239664506188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733388354234752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355135521255962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688795629080367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807319858673272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328177417495313,0.0,0.0,0.154029956241427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwawawaayayayayay,2020/03/19,"I think I’m going to kill myself, I’ve wanted to for a while and I deserve to be able to, here’s why My dad molested me when I was 3 and was extremely physically abusive to everyone in our family, my older brother I trusted molested my younger sisters from the ages of 3-7. We finally got away from those two and a good family friend married my mum and became my step dad, he was the greatest thing to happen to us. My brother died in 2015 at 10 years old I was 12 on my little sisters birthday. It fucked up my family and then my stepdad died in 2016, I’ve been the rock for my family for the past few years. It fucked up their lives so hard I haven’t been able to show any weakness and needed to be their support. I’m 17 and I’ve had the shortest fucking life ever, why can’t I just fucking end it now instead of suffering more. Anyone who calls me selfish can fuck off, try watching the man you call your father die in front of you, try being in the kitchen and hearing blood curdling screams that haunt your dreams as your mum finds your dead brother who was sleeping right in the bunk under you. Try living with the guilt that your sisters were being fucked by someone you trusted when they were only fucking 5 years old. Try learning that your older brother got away with a 200 dollar fine and six months good behaviour. I’ve lost 2 brothers, 2 fathers, my sisters are permanently scarred now and my mums a shell.",6.001660839160838,5.631630241258744,6.399431818181817,81.01914772727272,66.51748251748252,8.968181818181819,33.60926573426573,8.278499904357787,2.484294405594406,1123,45,223,13,16,364,161,286,0.20600000000000002,0.7120000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.9916,0,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,3,10,3,1,9,23,10,1,13,0,18,12,2,0,1,20,37,16,5,2,1,16,1,0,1,0,2,2,1,1,10,13,1,0,3,3,1,3,2,16,0,2,13,4,38,7,35,20,3,38,0,2,1,7,40,16,7,0,19,140,48,1,0.17583945726908867,0.10417050169151693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978843036744976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06147551849678538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16520695838528449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795517459016589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27374039276292816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787078361219317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952842804940262,0.0,0.08401106842750453,0.0,0.0,0.3315315820047187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631176523675886,0.08035703917179207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792656424873236,0.5689626068210235,0.0,0.0,0.04996680789395302,0.14748579411076812,0.14063487721821236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777471256721648,0.0,0.07875880766191702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909192398237676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727015334260457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062100304429854876,0.0,0.08811866543327396,0.1552694622968024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597476963014794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017668859295463,0.0,0.0,0.06519136475567819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845139310234074,0.0,0.0,0.06686691544127625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392932930633065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508296786866507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798322321109511,0.0,0.0744941007617461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977026615855912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584099610335521,0.056335412065968975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387668981611863,0.0,0.0858847996397239,0.0,0.1057566082766926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051857333870276086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586677601073617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16985226803734266
mentalhealth,Plantpot179,2020/03/19,"when I feel happy people look at me like I’m insane all throughout the day I’ll feel mediocre and low, then someone will say something mildly funny or stupid and I’ll lose it. Mostly people don’t even have to say anything, I’ll just start laughing and laughing for no reason in the middle of the corridor and all my friends are looking at me but they’re laughing too because I’m laughing (that happened yesterday). 

ill talk happily about morbid topics like the death of my family members, funerals and typically unfunny topics. i feel like I’m on top of the world, and these happy insane feeling moments are what I live for. Coming back to reality is the worst part though.",6.421802325581398,7.06881617054264,6.889447674418608,74.38905523255815,65.58914728682171,8.93062015503876,33.954457364341074,8.841846274778883,3.0268364341085268,542,23,91,8,8,177,86,129,0.185,0.5660000000000001,0.249,0.8625,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,7,14,1,0,6,0,6,1,0,1,2,18,18,11,2,0,3,0,4,3,1,1,1,2,0,0,4,7,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,0,8,7,10,12,17,5,16,0,2,2,0,4,8,0,2,10,56,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460654163399266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648471243802815,0.0,0.10820090083217268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528984817204723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11447127999273185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723550307291535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673289579433042,0.0,0.3589925167065113,0.1268043342016808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13713421983728252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15696055794316796,0.3778990311332705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26014911210749897,0.0,0.15673364914098173,0.0,0.2981065914320048,0.19857443309366413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19221262393947586,0.0,0.2461089994214113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18249711411914696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28230646110506563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503931562478903,0.13664633855610273,0.0,0.0,0.12563372802837372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266586234954362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439050908106074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IsabellRomoZ,2020/03/19,"Does any one else doesn’t this? I don’t sleep all day so the next day i am are tired to wake up at all? I do this thing were when I’m upset or feeling that “darkness” in my chest I don’t sleep for a whole 24 hours so the next day I can just sleep and not wake up in a all day. I don’t know why I do this, I’ve done this since I was 13. I don’t know what I means either",-1.9856532356532384,-0.7643967692307676,0.6720146520146528,108.25354090354092,88.12087912087911,4.044444444444443,12.308913308913308,3.1291,-2.0256310134310143,278,2,87,0,9,95,52,91,0.102,0.879,0.019,-0.7476,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,4,0,13,7,6,0,3,12,18,5,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,3,1,11,0,7,15,5,13,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,8,55,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068278266105745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4578028605683496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553014571466567,0.18160905763162374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14824984637209787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08973200585842736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17476799731737822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950610492908604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933122069557541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3774736365149435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120255372196576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468014865900243,0.0,0.5327816839820212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790034609255585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039707515577534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601352192277857,0.19813415103072649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NeuralJunkie,2020/03/19,"I'm here, if you need someone. Hello all. I know this sub seems more of people looking for help, but I'm going to post about being available as someone to talk to in the current times. 

A little about me, I am a 28 year old who is back in school studying Cognitive Neuroscience. I was in psych ward multiple times and am on a current proper dose of medication with regimenting of therapy and other things to keep my mental health in check. I am diagnosed Bipolar 1 with Psychosis, PTSD, Substance Abuse, Anxiety Disorder and Eating Disorders.

Now, I cannot cure you, that isn't my intent. What I can do is be there as someone to lend an ear and if you need some guidance for help.  I care about everyone, it's a curse. Every living creature has a purpose and I want every living thing to know how much they matter and that includes you. 

So, if you want to talk, I'm here and ready to listen. Stay safe and smart in this current trying time and always remember, no matter what that mind of yours is saying you are important and worthy.",5.943250825082508,6.106480668316834,6.572029702970298,77.92639438943895,66.57425742574257,9.307590759075909,31.189768976897692,9.075114841892004,2.58626600660066,813,29,152,13,12,267,126,202,0.08800000000000001,0.765,0.147,0.8248,3,0,0,0,1,0,24.0,0,7,1,0,10,3,0,0,7,0,15,7,1,2,1,33,30,18,0,7,4,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,12,12,1,2,4,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,4,19,3,27,27,4,20,0,0,1,0,16,7,0,5,10,106,31,2,0.0,0.15628090547334944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975205024827556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090376779213207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142359035666183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448167874538533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387655782698174,0.0,0.0,0.3023395386983274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13496746996968212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222642627208127,0.1260368878947533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496227679122135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020440581237484,0.0,0.0,0.1768206812566549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723951105931772,0.0,0.0,0.14497848451983247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13219927522089156,0.2329416847003669,0.0,0.11076347039874099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328762014822994,0.13292500515913805,0.0,0.1331822295098511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969622808640208,0.19560557638920267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384077245695626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144342210391873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632452670934502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541850024206784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941791878345936,0.0,0.0,0.10489282775592862,0.0,0.13349067370031478,0.0,0.1200775544891412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352774153073895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405887262760414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21203376879868627,0.0,0.0,0.1508400852135073,0.0,0.17525809035687775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307372900579466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955199993227046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559704448155715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493980482173172
mentalhealth,didisconnectect,2020/03/19,"Question Regarding resolving the Oedipus complex. I have recently found out that i have some issues with my life and tracked it back to the Oedipus complex. i wanted to know if any of you have some articles or books that could help me get past this and become a better version of myself. i don’t want a step by step tutorial, i want to understand the situation more deeply and be able to get past it myself, not just follow instructions and patterns. i want to learn how to make myself better.",7.7119148936170205,7.270737425531915,7.810085106382981,72.55300000000003,63.04255319148936,10.924255319148937,35.821276595744685,10.355215969177356,3.687721702127659,394,16,70,8,5,128,62,94,0.0,0.8390000000000001,0.161,0.9001,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,3,3,3,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,2,0,27,17,7,0,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,8,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,12,3,11,14,4,8,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,5,4,52,17,3,0.1964661179167558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336036972936456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510703175482654,0.0,0.0,0.2169813916801008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3475166312952921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15686220856301586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154149576394342,0.0,0.0,0.20529087554304912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316870975115747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050595836051852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797264037418676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387698292779829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114265929384225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3750982803123217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200870154501094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19398658959372728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22083614814609026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045281575011285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4635232264355834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,njwjn1234,2020/03/19,"Help needed!!!! Hey all, I'm working on a bit of a project to improve crisis intervention, particularly out of hours ect. if anyone wants to contribute experience of any sort please message me, I'm looking for stuff that could help to explain some of the drivers behind behaviour /presentation or stories/poetry/ artwork tbh I have no firm idea atm, and obvs will all be anonymous, if anyone wants to help I thought it'd be a good pandemic project lol.",6.029076305220883,7.705007831325298,6.86524096385542,70.48091365461848,67.07228915662651,9.388755020080325,37.92971887550201,9.725611199111238,4.064439357429719,362,20,60,8,6,120,63,83,0.069,0.711,0.22,0.9164,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,6,0,0,0,2,16,14,4,0,6,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,12,8,4,4,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,5,2,35,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802903366291854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3249764786353349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537030525744927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855396500215236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22731606370071045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19491260582600745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4672861272668939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288513499795268,0.0,0.0,0.2623331586147463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951439645235538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17230973136761585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550877594143069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660239898201109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18448687410224368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741321125003677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691782606669959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayadviceacc42,2020/03/19,"Overwhelming Numbness Sometimes I just don’t feel anything. For example, when someone I care for is going through something hard and relatable, I’ll to to care for them or even be sad but I can’t. It’s like I don’t care about what happens to me or anyone else. I’m just existing. I have bad days and good ones, and on the good ones I’m inside my head a lot. On the good ones I like to cry. For some reason sadness is the main feeling I feel, but it’s nice to actually feel something. 
I analyze why I’m doing what I’m doing and the only answer I can can come up with is that I don’t truly feel anything. Where someone might feel a bit of compassion and even sadness at the loss of someone’s life, I feel nothing but a dull buzz. It wasn’t always like this. I remember in the past having genuine concern for my friends and family. I remember being able to relate to them. Please help me.",0.9147837837837828,3.121524086486488,3.0066891891891885,89.98138513513516,83.81081081081079,5.8621621621621625,23.844594594594607,7.1686216300943375,1.029816216216216,696,27,146,10,20,235,99,185,0.115,0.618,0.267,0.9865,0,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,1,7,19,0,1,9,0,17,3,1,1,0,29,34,12,0,0,7,0,8,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,7,8,0,0,11,0,0,2,5,8,0,3,1,8,19,11,22,30,4,11,0,6,0,0,4,6,0,5,6,97,26,0,0.11489219367862186,0.0,0.1121182076321484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559950896235232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033529319665389,0.1177206297550426,0.18909297189633564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593018267151324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543251867978053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35142074585600697,0.0,0.0,0.09896945160405718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620367983417444,0.07409596012867564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597768517419952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177042070128874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831013505682056,0.0,0.4066506167365135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876542383369421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529588135920313,0.2890983631032599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159878743270878,0.0,0.1029208384093552,0.0,0.11791253711294478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700981559927816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115175416104425,0.1683915672075258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767723448183782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218824612302038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102421584942366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335617716099323,0.08738069053312153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967759918893827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261171271808943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812831036945907,0.0,0.0,0.26030091708650865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920433485939067,0.17689924763705556,0.1136313173339424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367233445739688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,doniffalls,2020/03/19,I like a girl and it's messing with me So I met this girl I really like she said she wants to cuddle and all that but she likes someone else she is waiting to come back to her and it's really messing with me but of course I won't tell her this because i just want to make her happy and for her to live her best life. It's just not helping my current mental state,0.20472222222222314,1.9653601358024704,2.198256172839507,97.3359027777778,83.44444444444444,5.037654320987656,18.766975308641968,5.985473137389443,-0.3690135802469139,285,7,69,2,8,95,50,81,0.027000000000000003,0.746,0.22699999999999998,0.9529,1,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,1,17,9,7,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,0,2,6,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,1,17,5,9,6,2,4,0,0,0,1,15,0,0,0,5,48,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959797216698512,0.0,0.15536672240229638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674709192445653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21954841209726556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21291164127156734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27131444107497565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17083435804378694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18002260774611126,0.373550631955474,0.0,0.2250553661744117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17012807204327235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256849569438855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265532028931499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424402589815395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21595099096460973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22276809564273048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.300658509158605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,detourfaction,2020/03/19,"I'm not depressed, just tired. I'm so tired of everything. I don't feel good about myself, I don't feel good about anything I do anymore. The things people say to me just feel like pressure on me to do what they want. I'm so tired. I just want to lie down on my bed and never get up again. I sleep for a good 8 hours a day, sometimes even more, but I still get through the day without any energy. I'm afraid that if I bring this up to my friends, they will think I'm doing it all for attention and hate me, so I turn to a community of people I have never met, and hope I don't get judged. 

It just doesn't feel like a good year for me. A group of ex-friends shoved e out of their group, coronavirus made me miss an opportunity for an oversea homestay programme, family pressure to pursue and keep up the family business, even though it's not what I want to do in life, academic failure, social issues in general.

I'm constantly surrounded by people who keep telling me to do this, do that, and my family has high expectations of me. Yet I'm a failure and I always feel alone.

I'm so tired. How should I pull myself out of this, any advice? I've got a student internship programme coming up soon, and I want to get out of this slump and do my best at that. Thanks.",3.8366377005347614,4.142946268939394,5.127076648841356,85.96355614973265,71.1590909090909,8.636007130124778,26.89304812834225,8.671277953709913,1.6431085561497332,981,30,220,16,17,328,126,264,0.133,0.728,0.139,-0.1353,0,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,3,2,18,17,1,3,12,0,15,6,1,2,3,43,49,16,0,8,9,0,5,2,1,2,5,1,1,0,14,12,0,2,7,0,0,3,9,6,0,0,3,6,30,11,38,44,3,29,0,2,0,0,11,15,0,2,13,142,44,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960151947231718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176418628733104,0.0,0.0,0.08175734737058986,0.0,0.0,0.1336356902041662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974441269841122,0.0,0.0,0.0808567949588216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311422082924927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846393451357178,0.0,0.10618045882047078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12673473361423113,0.0,0.0846282500748915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129795091423977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830668025460663,0.0,0.2778826826113676,0.0,0.2484074006226216,0.1403890435854331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182558298969748,0.0,0.2053400347560424,0.0,0.0,0.3296518368214647,0.07858476451183853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970080325734224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038134735131129,0.0,0.09759095615780816,0.09676294096027707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255434371635908,0.0,0.17466992934622386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940152963850488,0.09600640563879426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929727536057763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15156306668443684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20435622684387236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813757771381268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832754169946467,0.10016021157635224,0.0,0.0,0.0971782719836709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846783328528732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588058347686175,0.09046145949083284,0.0,0.0,0.0652773070771797,0.06295885030016217,0.09653659291064827,0.0,0.0,0.4517259473944591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687494609672676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23181711114714534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947158387257947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06327401732077928
mentalhealth,bushbabybawbag,2020/03/19,"Friend tried to commit suicide after breakup Hi guys, my friend who lives abroad just attempted suicide after a breakup. Her sister found her luckily, I'm heartbroken over this and don't know what to say to her. I've tried my best to tell her that it isn't the end of the world and she will get better. Please please please everyone help me by writing positive messages or things that can help so I can show her that everything will be ok. I'm honestly begging you guys, help me help her.

Thank you X",4.624155844155844,5.8047474040404055,4.586320346320348,87.37090909090912,69.9090909090909,8.485425685425685,28.284271284271284,8.841846274778883,1.9835240981240976,399,14,82,7,7,123,66,99,0.10099999999999999,0.537,0.363,0.9829,0,0,0,0,0,3,8.0,0,2,0,3,2,7,0,0,3,1,7,0,0,0,1,8,13,4,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,2,8,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,14,7,9,9,1,5,0,0,0,0,24,2,0,1,3,47,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646941683435869,0.13879673296636966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389983085731915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995863494843925,0.14104354517500325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720717206598188,0.2424960196826277,0.0,0.08199234300521611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107817183317246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4207623408480693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624766922855978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857695807844084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5168042921612076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248014412994373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3433240208234636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716858022915548,0.1444851613887549,0.0,0.0,0.10426100022214872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130978619205502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,randomgothgirl,2020/03/19,"My mental health has declined so bad. I haven’t been wanting to look at myself for months. Here’s some venting I started having minor depressive episodes around October. Then something happened in my relationship 3 months ago that made me very insecure and hurt. And now I don’t have the energy to do anything. I haven’t been taking care of myself. I haven’t sent a photo of myself to my boyfriend in months. I don’t want to look at myself. It’s hard to take showers. 
Why did I get knocked down this hard? It’s so hard to do anything. Nights are so hard for me. I feel so sad and not good enough. It’s hard to shower. It’s hard to go brush my teeth. 
I’ve spent months in my home and now with covid 19 I’m here for longer. I worried I’ve wasted time I could’ve been out. I don’t feel okay. I’ve been disassociating a lot and feeling paranoid. Maybe venting all of this will help. I don’t know.",0.3166077656359008,2.6331423208556157,1.904933736340389,95.88635201116024,88.35828877005348,4.535596372936527,19.360381306672867,6.0469075449839425,-0.18361269472215724,702,21,157,6,23,227,100,187,0.19699999999999998,0.733,0.069,-0.9654,2,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,1,3,1,19,2,1,1,1,19,38,10,0,2,1,0,9,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,7,8,0,0,4,0,1,2,8,5,0,0,8,12,23,3,23,29,4,21,0,3,2,0,3,8,0,2,11,94,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044108440928296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19385691288511836,0.10485517679231414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834701352835107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009143832304682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404313283514557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144955232731714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12170519571024123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17866955466281834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615387136755201,0.0,0.06694092253913833,0.09879393476711408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415843109903523,0.0,0.633082736142845,0.0,0.0,0.12520180377220347,0.0,0.0,0.07894997346655798,0.0,0.11814971067184687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609314845238806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473251558989665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978224037345826,0.0,0.0,0.10013807993977514,0.0,0.11145266768008448,0.0,0.0,0.11833261866236773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870133692249935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760650298193432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053488267315638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645888548295306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067799213981312,0.0,0.0,0.08337006555045749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17712194953499005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686823992093959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718640164319847,0.1389473498913062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628421832897272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961815876588175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FlabergastedFlasted,2020/03/19,"Pure AC Vent Right Here I was doing okay, not the best, but I think I was genuinely not feeling numb, but just plain I guess. Though I'm falling back down. I have been tracking my moods with Youper and I think it helps a bit. Idk. But recently its just back to back depression every day. I can't do anything. Now the only energy I have is just the urge to die. I feel like theres nails ripping my throat apart, theres a twist in my stomach, and I can't stop it. I'm just going down and down. I'm cutting again, and I'm not proud of it, I hate myself even more but I feel a  bit more relieved I guess. Though I promised I wouldn't to my girlfriend who's been supporting me for 4 years so she understands it. I'm kinda pushing her away to just keep going so I can get this out of my system, but part of me knows this won't help I guess. I can't see her because of Corona and it sucks. I just got back from college and its been forever. My weighted blanket feels like her but it doesn't and it makes me sad, relieved, mad, and everything. Theres just so many emotions going on I guess and I can't handle it. I've been being a therapist for everyone and I want to scream and be heard but I care for them first and I need them to be okay I feel like. Because if they aren't okay, how can they help me. I don't know. This thing is controlling me again and I want it to stop.",-0.3504488416988423,1.7370588682432455,1.5413938223938253,99.07464864864866,88.69594594594595,4.8693436293436285,17.916602316602315,6.3317336037704965,-0.34309409266409263,1059,28,256,11,35,347,142,296,0.156,0.68,0.16399999999999998,-0.1648,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,4,4,26,22,4,0,7,3,26,4,2,3,1,59,61,27,1,5,18,0,6,3,1,2,1,2,0,0,16,15,1,4,10,0,0,5,12,8,0,1,8,9,47,13,23,48,6,28,0,2,1,0,14,9,1,6,16,173,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532662322084504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974185563737682,0.31891956153406503,0.0,0.1264148315023035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881445738591508,0.0,0.2264015030003057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571711637554496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629522771300385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687036549991186,0.0,0.08930656739062214,0.0,0.10761206890555976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663536385298398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068485133917867,0.0,0.08736185161946138,0.09907859917787026,0.09318834413119888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621395603052338,0.22222479321217745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819720171462644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05417284900640403,0.0,0.17678532451213833,0.0,0.08292899311449785,0.0,0.4568973406096042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237071416203593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20850021407084451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921629113355724,0.0,0.0,0.1139687388120086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15197057473464562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921273496866967,0.1051236458298594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688354902973157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885961263525318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228430762149208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237967176602136,0.0,0.0,0.08854922830750328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262613807422932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733760971721284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766423633956564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203900899256002,0.06888588879490616,0.13287853174777425,0.2037464258756722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794316079131562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223160731826607,0.0,0.0,0.12626439657433727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06677185557934757
mentalhealth,great_unkown,2020/03/19,"Am I a sociopath or just depressed??? Okay so I'm kinda worried and wondering if I'm a bit of a sociopath. I can feel things I guess idk I'm mostly numb all the time. But I'm also worried a manipulate people without knowing it and it's all subconscious to make me feel better about getting something out of it. 

My emotions feel so distant like they aren't even there and I cant really put a name to any feeling I really have. If i do feeling anything at all its sadness and demotivated. But I also think that I'd have no problem doing something others would think is hard, but I do have morals. And i know there are consequences but I'm scared consequences are the only thing keeping me from doing something wrong idk. Basically idk if I'm depressed or if I show some signs of an anti social disorder. 

Also are there any scientific ways to diagnose someone with an disorder like this? I heard the brain layout between a healthy person and a person with anti social disorders are different.",3.5989576348674177,5.7522430621761655,5.223139286802802,77.83611703748858,74.33678756476685,7.649984760743678,30.005790917403232,8.4952907291091,2.608237671441634,793,36,138,15,17,268,108,193,0.223,0.7020000000000001,0.075,-0.9786,1,0,3,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,1,11,11,0,1,12,1,17,3,1,2,3,45,38,21,0,6,12,0,6,2,0,1,2,1,0,2,9,9,0,1,10,1,0,1,4,7,0,0,1,7,15,4,14,36,6,5,1,3,0,0,7,2,0,11,3,99,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800463188509791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587605235746967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605867326776613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032380155881724,0.1274387007426107,0.0,0.0,0.13030905337588666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20107839860105384,0.11847828232258588,0.0,0.12195778857283385,0.4013473658637953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313053052483125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709892709205986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29511045232321736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06098649877684281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859102675648626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456696608088363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10375480305222104,0.0,0.0,0.12830328250476955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405656080687125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791804296668482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08877826730053695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092574052115308,0.20384790480007872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116946467931293,0.0,0.11734568252469695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14956018832368348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168668860463018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23798264680520706,0.09890477444779827,0.269592891681833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15510017471060608,0.1495914754814965,0.0,0.0,0.0680660807676372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265467602282687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125233545316392,0.1265884806899246,0.0,0.2370895411213511,0.0,0.08292149550516971,0.12762570363286094,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BorbBirb,2020/03/19,"I hate myself. I'm sorry but this is gonna be quite long...

Ive always had a bad relationship with my mom growing up. My dad left us when i was about 10 since he came out as gay and found a new partner. I hardly have contact with him as we've grown distant despite always being a daddy's girl when i was younger. Prior to my dad leaving my parents would always fight. My dad started blaming me for their divorce/ separation. I live with my mom and she and I don't get along. There isnt a day where she hasnt called me fat, or her bringing me down. She despises me so much. I resemble my dad so much from face to personality that she always nitpicks on me for that. ""Oh you're just like your father"" or ""your father may have left but i feel like hes still here."" (she was talking about me) she doesn't like my dad. Growing up i dealt with alot of bullying which she didnt care much about. In highschool I also faced bullying which she didnt act on or care about either. She would just tell me how i was weak, too sensitive and too dramatic. I ended up feeling depressed when i was 12 and self harmed for a year before she wound out. She threatened to send me away to our home country and called me ""sick"" I did get child therapy but she never came with me to appointments. She always compared me to my younger sister, saying im not strong and independent unlike my little sister. How my little sister never asks for anything yet im so spoiled. Or how my sister was just better than me in general. While my mom was a single mom, I would cook, clean and tutor my sister while my mom was away and she knew that (this was from the ages of 10-15yrs old since when i turned 15 my sister didnt ask for much help anymore) I know she knows that because when shes in a good mood about me she talks to her friends and thats what she says. When we fighr, she always tells me hurtful things like i should just die, or im not a priority, she doesnt care about what happens to me Etc etc.. Then the next minute she's telling me how she loves me unconditionally, only for me to say something she doesnt agree with and the cycle starts again. Shes depended on me for so many things and sometimes it feels hard. I was the one sorting out the documents to send off to the lawyers when she was filing for her divorce, and when she applied for my stepdad's visa, she made me do it for her, and got mad when i couldnt understand anything, calling me dumb and stupid and ""how are you supposed to become a lawyer if you dont even know how to apply for a visa for your stepdad"" keeping in mind I was 15 at the time. My mom and I argue every single day, over small things, but they hurt. She was on a call eith my aunt and i came down to eat some cereal, then she started to call me fat over and over and laughing about it with my aunt. She knows my weight is my biggest insecurity, I tried to tell her later on but she just told me to ""stop being so dramatic"" and ""it was just a joke"" my mom and we don't usually joke to eachother at all. When I turned 18, the first thing she said to me is that ""yay i can finally kick you out!"" as a joke. I guess it is funny, but something inside me just feels sad. Im 18 now and we still argue. I had mock exams this week and yesterday, the teacher who was supervising the students with the exams told me to go home because I was sick. I told my mom and she said ""its probably just stress."" I ended up getting a fever when I got home but she didnt believe me and assumed i just didnt want to sit the exams. She said ""i dont care if you're sick. Deal with it."" ""your health is not my priority"" ""why are you stressed? You're too young to be stressed. Im the one who is stressed. I work day and night!"" She always compares me to her, and my sister. My stepdad, hes a kind person but he always sides with my mom. My mom is the more dominant one in their relationship and my dad just usually sides with her to stay out of trouble. The only support I have is my boyfriend, who i was with for 5 years, but we broke up due to circumstances, but we got back together secretly because my mom now hates him and doesnt want me to get back with him, but ironically she goes around and boasts how she's such a cool mother who gives her children freedom and be with whoever they want. I made my mom believe that I am no londer depressed, anxious, or feeling any sort of sadness or depression. I had to stop helf harming because she would always bring it up in a spiteful way and would call me sick and mentally disturbed.

I feel lonely, and that I have nobody to run to but my current boyfriend and my pet birds. They cant do much, but they've been there for me, my boyfriend and I have been going strong for a while and he's really been a massive help to all of this, but i still feel depressed, messed up and I dont think i can cope anymore... Theres so much more I wish to talk about but I cant remember from the top of my head. Ive tried for so many years to just forget whatever happens and its just all overflowing. Ive attempted suicide a few times in the past which failed. I feel like a failure, i feel useless and unloved by my own mom. I understand she must have insecurities and stress too but does she need to take it out on me? I always feel jealous when i see other kids happy with their parents, while im constantly locked up in my own room, crying and emotionally deteriorating. I dont think I can handle this anymore. I love my mother and i want to make her proud but for years, ive felt like nothing except a burden, a failure and a bad person. She's hardly ever been emotionally supportive and she has hit me in the past. She's one of those ""tiger moms"" the typical asian mom. I've cried to myself to sleep so many times.. i just cant handle it anymore...

I have grown to hate myself, every part of myself. My looks, my personality, traits and even my own feelings. I cant even look in a mirror without feeling disgust. I've tried so hard to stay normal and fine, but im finding it even more difficult as days go by. 

Anyone who read up this far, thank you so much for reading...",2.5704912836767018,3.9391054611727436,3.8714196513470687,89.78402012678289,75.21236133122028,6.696177496038036,24.188938193343898,7.24861992348623,0.8251353153724246,4740,146,1045,52,100,1555,436,1262,0.191,0.716,0.09300000000000001,-0.9993,3,2,2,0,5,1,150.0,7,9,6,10,76,75,14,8,45,2,92,20,6,12,7,197,176,115,2,17,46,36,18,6,2,9,10,6,6,10,42,79,5,3,27,6,2,16,29,44,0,5,47,28,224,30,142,113,25,143,0,12,3,3,176,55,1,17,74,720,266,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024957811899148058,0.25968373403566314,0.0,0.0,0.02122317819054786,0.0,0.0,0.03525726675680545,0.12380369749707552,0.02182204609478944,0.0,0.05136466657091173,0.027782610968136744,0.05835237116371884,0.0,0.058643732484373524,0.047995562002788636,0.05211639330212905,0.07609882384455506,0.03446786902564905,0.026556545318351117,0.07032367171507029,0.0,0.02760180870574489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912071620349558,0.10708428487620412,0.12727854984753634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033725822711854064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856320327186191,0.08050884700987128,0.0321750904073011,0.10752100302244996,0.0,0.03238999640260997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027311190756449097,0.0,0.1463067794648668,0.0,0.0,0.031934580261405165,0.0,0.07021180902916506,0.05528379006714719,0.0,0.06961253005461072,0.08245295397781799,0.0282303112714854,0.05258982730204729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893623903330704,0.04459140643434712,0.029965517265199994,0.034187914666827766,0.02852444445733861,0.0265463444324638,0.0,0.03421903827139425,0.024111982336090833,0.0,0.0652216206706869,0.029938499650627143,0.053210351619645886,0.026176613683869157,0.07488202250831022,0.0,0.03438021257563277,0.0,0.05519600002215791,0.033222542026064075,0.11182847241923664,0.09243722652570377,0.032029419669055564,0.033173688826082764,0.0,0.0,0.041837446006325885,0.0,0.09391546172571356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681972214188274,0.0,0.23597739488309966,0.0,0.0,0.02773997746696072,0.0,0.032499352536058075,0.06860656202736079,0.0,0.0,0.03304580607323256,0.06781730125010492,0.0,0.0,0.091482794058677,0.06255919839038968,0.027558103178350342,0.02761896727856104,0.05241536995951588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056334650077751985,0.05906138737718065,0.020832238051453227,0.09492302893776464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031451313764388755,0.0,0.03151217547925144,0.548273743795675,0.0,0.0,0.1605953507829389,0.02314106495506876,0.048140582301559584,0.030141829616243607,0.033191106773244106,0.029287515768530392,0.030578176395577014,0.029945860262952474,0.0,0.03274857704643959,0.0,0.08459205650458193,0.04747167479529985,0.0,0.0,0.06930776310166067,0.03379628657749727,0.059585010020640365,0.0,0.10900191835929256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033648561470704684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03319459430462803,0.06243485586105529,0.0,0.019993273236542326,0.0,0.0,0.06701353478800426,0.03535369315994698,0.0,0.08906066696167778,0.07445590617287035,0.0,0.0,0.02486951828176937,0.0,0.03255777500329421,0.0,0.0,0.051632785387252494,0.0,0.03123152109048195,0.0,0.0,0.048052398671399724,0.030866481542588312,0.03493590060889566,0.06626963498895744,0.06652924536733892,0.07477060082507526,0.0521842133583742,0.1787489191126106,0.0,0.0,0.03413756125352222,0.07083116662498214,0.0,0.0,0.02346527071140888,0.07525379348095022,0.1091121046153483,0.028733037876600406,0.035690191191773794,0.0,0.08293544443293667,0.039994911435738974,0.0,0.0,0.05459462572951699,0.0,0.0,0.08946456016276033,0.0,0.06356655118560439,0.06789282179485658,0.0,0.06497930251272083,0.037540563090382964,0.0,0.0687445697440785,0.0,0.07363146551609644,0.02477223752030189,0.025033963133689743,0.03800413273728268,0.0,0.0,0.028161252312177695,0.0,0.03588878947693775,0.030084345277427482,0.0,0.02272051083828856,0.0,0.0,0.11084982811264912,0.0,0.0,0.08039024559257119
mentalhealth,pinetree2212,2020/03/19,"Do I have mental health issues? Hi, English is not my first language and I'm mobile, so... Anyways, I think that maybe I have depression due to being so sensitive, crying on a stupid comment on facebook. A little about myself: I'm 24f and a college student. I used to be a smart kid. Not a genius or something but I can understand things quicker than normal kids. My parents took me to test my IQ and it's around 135 to 140. I don't remember exactly. Everything was fine, school was amazing until I got into an accident when I was in 10th grade. A drunk driver hit me when I was on my bicycle. I didn't have any serious injury, just a big bump on my head. My parents took me to the hospital and I was fine or that's what we thought. Soon I realized that I became more and more stupid. I couldn't understand Math or Physic anymore (they were my favorite subjects). Things got worse when I went to college. I constantly failed a tons of classes. That's when I started to think that I was a loser, a worthless person. I used to have the pride of be the smartest one, now I'm always the stupidest. When my friends went out to party or dating, I stayed home stick to my phone. My childhood friend went to the same college but one year later than me. I must dropped out long time ago without her support. Now she graduated and has a decent job now but I'm still stuck here. My parents pay for my college fee so I feel extremely guilty about the money they've been wasted on me. They're not rich nor poor. College is not just my dream but my father's too. Because my brother didn't go to college (he didn't want to, now he also has a great job), my father want me to do it for him. Although he doesn't say it but I can tell that he's disappointed in me. Due to corona epidemiologic situation, I started to take online classes lately. It took me four hours straight to do my homework yesterday, just some yes or no questions. This morning, I got into a stupid fight with some random person on internet. He ended up call me a ""stupid cow"" and it hurts me so bad that I busted into tears. Like all the thoughts about me being worthless kicked in. I cried for a while. Me, a stupid cow, have no talent, look or anything. I just feel lost. Am I have depression or just simply too sensitive?",1.812365673058668,4.028018043668126,3.3393316878678583,88.8548946269224,80.35371179039302,5.991342320106323,24.36700208847541,7.1686216300943375,1.0601889500664514,1776,66,360,23,46,584,226,458,0.239,0.655,0.106,-0.997,5,0,1,0,2,0,62.0,1,0,1,5,29,29,6,0,24,1,35,3,1,2,3,61,69,33,0,5,22,6,2,1,2,1,1,1,2,4,16,15,1,0,11,2,5,7,14,17,0,4,24,4,64,12,46,38,7,58,0,9,1,0,30,19,0,11,31,249,80,19,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365771831572967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07547163091937167,0.07852753682935182,0.0,0.0,0.06417821713720677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935946127980852,0.0,0.0,0.07766256059227625,0.08401373363324686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879915947842693,0.057530106904029016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636739804859308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198581728425073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20733295021589832,0.0,0.0,0.16257004999039984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358821311403071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481813939655691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543764287095036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027530287355901,0.0,0.0,0.14582773834159515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05363547139409537,0.0,0.2264408590015933,0.1040487396756837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968559483336414,0.10031618194067993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466579166511227,0.0,0.09294033691592034,0.0,0.10103035931205344,0.0,0.0,0.09850295126005247,0.18730519459681144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645907897025413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0461068441988501,0.09458851502307396,0.0,0.08351888031069404,0.07925120743902113,0.0,0.1030214301857706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481234411645616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510777442938934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924674347430757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12790184678494132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3143767132587253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16480917047453242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057215672377107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690844584397696,0.0,0.0,0.07505076557663637,0.0,0.0955125099864926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060814225546004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265446410072073,0.0,0.0,0.13359818169046042,0.10059116303940728,0.07536797445615784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709559970062216,0.0,0.0,0.07095823374704756,0.0,0.08248788517240306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539707562645586,0.12094334257860508,0.0,0.14984637177942295,0.055030805049326566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31456219880801245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19649534808801367,0.0,0.16301934890968886,0.0,0.0,0.1113296071774819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26245963331820715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097410511802334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617615902981366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607743876886828
mentalhealth,rj_pan,2020/03/19,"my first post Hi, I’m (19M) new to reddit and I’m posting because I feel incredibly alone. I’ve struggled with anxiety and depression for a majority of my life. I have a history of self harm but it’s been 3 months since i last cut myself. Last May I left a toxic relationship. My ex (i’m gay btw) was my best friend for the 3 years we were together. We were in the same friend group in high school and started dating when i was 16. While we were together he was the only person i talked to about my mental health, some other close friends had a vague idea of what I was going through but I told my ex everything. Now I’m a sophomore in college and have a great group of friends at school (2 of them are from that same group in high school but they aren’t close with my ex anymore) but I don’t feel comfortable reaching out to anyone for help. I think i’ve convinced myself that since it’s been so long since we broke up i should be over it by now. i’m 100% over my ex i was happy to dump him but i think i’m still affected by the trauma. I honestly feel paralyzed. My life revolved around my ex for so long that I’m not really sure how to be vulnerable with anyone else. I’m not really sure how to move on in life so i guess im looking for advice on how to deal with trauma from a toxic/mentally abusive relationship. Any advice on how to move on/feel comfortable opening up to people again is appreciated. I’m sorry if this post doesn’t make sense or doesn’t belong here. It’s 3am and i’m just looking for any support i can get.
thanks for reading",1.7153553406223705,3.417572213414637,3.642985702270817,89.08914634146345,78.39024390243901,6.9631623212783875,22.590832632464256,7.873277556716777,0.9573091673675368,1218,37,271,20,29,412,161,328,0.126,0.6859999999999999,0.188,0.9864,1,1,0,0,0,1,27.0,4,0,2,2,16,23,2,1,11,0,24,5,0,6,2,48,49,21,0,2,10,5,3,0,4,2,4,0,0,2,10,18,0,0,6,1,0,3,6,8,0,1,12,5,35,15,46,33,5,43,0,2,2,1,29,21,0,5,16,160,45,5,0.0,0.11110697528827597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18326993182853804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971216875476733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12753920826901444,0.0,0.07173693037302106,0.0,0.0929987100529191,0.13113806314734325,0.0960826478890899,0.0,0.08347883089678584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057163821413775774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841013329408296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667698022624037,0.08076749553396874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833622831437086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427811513025296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18966001166407168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797642021603738,0.0,0.0,0.2897985503708482,0.0,0.04899309723829505,0.0,0.05329398245913956,0.0,0.0,0.10338627708568857,0.10330274411891524,0.0,0.0,0.09982427392932544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967748398130062,0.0,0.0,0.06285480303346945,0.1981549719134229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058595454801081,0.10129212048450434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287681588415172,0.0,0.0,0.1018858348019688,0.0,0.19870626168571626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597425646099992,0.15749325397318284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259494039251133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945022376129555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484959253052542,0.19933405722227032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056761081022624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131942921363628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06501115417268982,0.08187992770528736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694290007769087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379947731456463,0.0,0.1201481802772754,0.0,0.0,0.20135658037250564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847131888399272,0.0,0.0,0.09782683841315996,0.0,0.0,0.2327127154292199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497242834741782,0.06637379113599218,0.0,0.07488811796086016,0.0,0.0,0.09803305060340957,0.0,0.0,0.10641373821363158,0.17676196029870428,0.0,0.0,0.07537207005181151,0.0,0.08633459298705112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017331460693502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960517183029497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060387446353313376
mentalhealth,margaritavilles,2020/03/19,"remember places but not events i’ve noticed that i can vividly recollect places and settings from my life but not events that happened there. my poor memory of life events is something i’m completely aware of and regularly discuss in therapy & with a psychiatrist but i’ve never mentioned how vividly i remember places. for context, i’m 22 currently and can remember the exact layout of places i stayed on vacation, places i lived, friends’ houses, etc from the age of ten (when my largest traumatic life events occurred) on. curious as to if anyone else  experiences this as a result of ptsd/any other diagnosis?",7.7505974025974025,8.936058163636364,7.80948051948052,67.06136363636367,62.81818181818181,11.74025974025974,39.35064935064936,11.491704259439757,5.137974025974026,498,26,78,15,7,161,71,110,0.085,0.888,0.027000000000000003,-0.8047,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,3,3,0,2,2,18,6,11,0,1,6,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,7,1,15,6,1,18,0,0,2,0,3,8,0,1,8,48,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395471488809246,0.0,0.0875836484602919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09005505191967605,0.13196363643879608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350369977147203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759001526682506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436382267065426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598425587419146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950514318093427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389121409978015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486098162789661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729108892323065,0.0,0.0,0.11372656815745193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933309231817514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14663167067399427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6728063022752657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15055211100758864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4376920467368358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991511345549568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13727618894460922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14728600640092115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Glassesofwater,2020/03/19,"I feel so isolated I spent all of last month alone and away from work due to non-mental health issues. I do have a history of depression and anxiety. I had started to sink into a deep place despite therapy and medications. I started feeling better once I went back to work. But now thanks to covid, I’m forced to work from home and my depression is becoming worse. I feel so alone. I’ve already started pulling hair again.",3.669216027874565,5.6947950853658575,4.663937282229966,82.48890243902441,73.75609756097559,8.588153310104529,30.00696864111498,9.23628265651192,2.791799303135888,335,15,64,8,7,109,56,82,0.247,0.67,0.083,-0.9259,0,2,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,4,5,4,0,0,2,0,4,3,1,0,1,10,14,7,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,3,4,8,2,11,11,1,15,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,9,36,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3455320528042705,0.18408023352113134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12761006032509378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15672455073947342,0.12826746480333526,0.0,0.0,0.18422979094761027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14753089156313332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873483692096385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25303416319733163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731243416418946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673251675601733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17410748418041358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359733375532171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680446672898938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314705505884322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17764841274442358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17428213026674672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3542093359791096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535772796791339,0.19076306856242944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546355916968308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3643214750682133,0.0,0.1699947958169157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExStripperLifeAdvice,2020/03/19,"Why isn’t suicide looked at less harshly for those with a sound mind, who have lived their life to the fullest extent they wanted. I just realized I have been chasing death for years. I have made choices everyday that will almost certainly lead to my death and I’m not trying to fix that. I have most likely given myself a nice amount of heart damage along with any other organs. I refuse to treat any medical conditions as I did it to myself and am not going to take the resources from someone who didn’t choose to self destruct. I am so detached from myself that sometimes I miss major things. I literally (and accidentally) burned a half dollar size wound onto my leg with a hot pipe and didn’t notice. I used to thrive in all areas of life. And now I just know that I wasn’t made to last long, I can feel it. My life wasn’t meant to be long term. I have lived my life and done everything I want. It’s been short and sweet and im okay with that. I just wish that mindset was more widely accepted.",3.2794801980198014,4.8219977772277245,4.054542079207923,88.48003094059406,73.70297029702971,6.832178217821784,22.525990099009906,7.413659706084162,0.727335643564357,789,20,164,9,16,252,121,202,0.122,0.785,0.094,-0.8228,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,2,1,5,10,1,0,6,1,20,8,2,4,2,37,35,10,3,3,5,0,2,1,0,1,6,1,0,1,14,13,0,1,6,0,1,2,7,3,0,1,13,5,25,7,25,20,8,15,0,2,1,0,6,6,0,2,8,110,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562888618963563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21227582037408152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597212578549396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14027220547833802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891736806776516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870232143556635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849523416466417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16859025757730325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577599751229445,0.127223823749696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4409680263325482,0.0762514807496633,0.0,0.275638215333049,0.2762469826292361,0.13106561560278732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29536821359550586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572314507982004,0.0,0.0,0.15759357155586876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776950305927033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16282265399479814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322437824094332,0.0,0.15436443195940666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072322428808726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735069898208406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036908171046896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596623559491873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480066746272562,0.0,0.0,0.18411686043724185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14083547910820002,0.0,0.17948118231987106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050865838767914
mentalhealth,fourththrowawayacc,2020/03/19,"Everything feels dull, I don’t feel the need to do anything I think this is a symptom of depression, but it doesn’t feel like depression. I’m not sad, I don’t want to die, I have aspirations and goals and such, it’s just that I don’t ever want to do anything. I’m going to try and describe it in a way that doesn’t make it sound like I’m just lazy: 

I literally have no motivation for anything. I know I have to do things, yet I don’t do them. I have to set alarms to eat meals or I forget, same with drinking water. I used to live reading and now it’s just something to do so I don’t feel like I’ve fully wasted my day, I don’t even really enjoy it anymore. Being on my phone bores me, watching TV bores me, working out bores me, it’s like I have no opinions on anything. I don’t feel like I hate anything, but I don’t feel like I like anything. Everything’s the same for me. The things I do, I do because someone tells me to. I painted the basement because my mom asked me. I walked the dog because my mom asked me. I feel like I’m not feeling any emotions. Even little things I used to enjoy, like crappy reality Tv shows, don’t interest me, I just zone out or sleep. Things I used to hate don’t make me mad anymore. 

Some past history: I’ve been diagnosed with anxiety and anxiety-induced depression, which I haven’t felt for over 2 years. I think I might be bipolar (runs in the family), because I sometimes swing between these types of emotion where I feel like I’m the worlds most boring character in the worlds most boring book, and then doing a million things at once, adopting a million passions, waking up at 2am to workout or to clean my room. Sometimes I get super super angry at very small things (although I think this is more environmental than chemical since my mother has some anger issues due to a diagnosed bipolar disorder). 

I can’t really go to therapy right now. My mom (the parent I live with), works for the government and is super scared the gov is going to shut down and she won’t get paid, so she doesn’t want to waste money on unnecessary things. I went to therapy for a while for anxiety/family issues. 

So that’s my little rant. Any advice would be greatly appreciated because I don’t really like feeling like this, I’d actually prefer to be super anxious than to not feel anything. I’ve tried meditation, working out, faking happiness/emotions until it actually happens, most of that type of thing, without success. But if you think maybe I’m just being lazy, please tell me, maybe that will snap me out of it more if I can see myself from another perspective.",4.2392972915333775,5.166324808061422,5.591210812539988,80.75298811047132,70.59309021113243,8.55280443591384,29.635370014928554,8.841846274778883,2.31279778204308,2039,79,404,36,36,686,218,521,0.196,0.642,0.163,-0.9258,1,0,2,0,0,1,66.0,0,1,1,10,16,39,4,2,17,0,45,12,2,6,1,72,90,23,1,8,17,5,12,12,0,4,5,1,2,0,27,15,4,0,19,7,2,6,23,17,0,2,4,15,63,22,57,77,9,45,0,5,2,1,14,26,0,12,23,260,90,12,0.0,0.0,0.11054611915362016,0.0,0.0,0.055348543274037834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770351068239428,0.05939261250049534,0.04332990748108655,0.06398776108237167,0.11234451994251614,0.0,0.0,0.3262727404112431,0.0,0.10590263874873963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263793420242132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036528504201835815,0.0,0.14635340921760806,0.11497804277199195,0.058784005168779366,0.0,0.06491503997482245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055486229197242665,0.0,0.057957478840534024,0.0,0.19113916964871336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482117028612294,0.051234669589698585,0.0,0.0,0.1018098464008876,0.0,0.1067914422501239,0.0,0.3150311069586937,0.2832484146673149,0.054383862841698966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059184756289643876,0.0,0.09657048261943572,0.0,0.0,0.06244646652209701,0.0,0.0,0.05008709958265115,0.0,0.0,0.11184174138895027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823615100695264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031128195004241986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3320608605171881,0.11353753164477134,0.10002938311826204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561608677395164,0.0,0.11380620065566242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008673063208698,0.0,0.1990103746142677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04199829061482101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060320395341620925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628926884363016,0.0,0.05406986610151108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062174374988196814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665593234447733,0.0,0.10885626500251956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04837076684296298,0.0,0.0,0.056707126230423226,0.0,0.04513522857640027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04685369342674815,0.0,0.0566815097597169,0.0,0.04799140046548984,0.04360470462485439,0.1120380124769224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058871275471733125,0.0,0.0,0.09901276989904494,0.0,0.12954693525825134,0.0,0.3010360071437313,0.14517204950192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691050506270809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675788980059135,0.0,0.04673443067277058,0.1002242882883024,0.044958675522369485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052506407915153784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054599521602451816,0.0,0.12370510418898716,0.0,0.0,0.04023586040415365,0.0,0.0,0.036474692322382866
mentalhealth,FuckThePopulation810,2020/03/19,"I don't really know. Hey reddit, I dont really know where to start this since I dont usually talk about my feelings to anyone because I feel like if I tell people how I really feel nobody will want to be around me. I feel like I dont have any friends anymore and I feel like nothing matters. I have a physical feeling in my chest most of the time that I can't describe, it just feels extremely empty. Like there's a void and nothing will ever fill it. I've never really had much of anything and lately it seems like everything I do have still is slowly being lost or destroyed or ruined or stolen. I honestly have a hard time looking myself in the mirror anymore. I havent felt this empty in a long time and this time I dont think I'm strong enough to pull myself out of this hole. I dont want to struggle anymore. I dont want to keep living just to keep losing or ruining everything I touch. I hate myself and I'm so fucking tired and I don't know what to do. I dont know if this is to vent or because I want help. I just want this pain and exhaustion to stop..",3.526165191740411,3.9856837699115104,5.114318584070798,85.23082890855459,71.92035398230091,8.150560471976402,26.128613569321534,8.238735603445708,1.5018900294985245,836,25,180,12,15,284,108,226,0.187,0.687,0.127,-0.9470000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,11,18,3,1,6,0,24,5,1,1,2,46,52,16,0,7,10,0,10,5,1,2,3,0,0,0,11,9,0,3,14,0,0,2,12,10,0,0,3,11,29,8,19,45,3,20,0,4,1,1,5,6,1,9,17,116,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053300700234283925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331940005265033,0.05480471996013867,0.0,0.06449959263757744,0.06977431022078973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555874623261364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6430207586182138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809869034677051,0.0,0.0,0.07089868186057609,0.0,0.0,0.14088475573387824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774169643883315,0.1679828416396739,0.07525654446180073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060555753290650285,0.07246052016682568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021257410836629,0.07738346031085097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253607984935007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139334477635472,0.0,0.0,0.17230114000332794,0.0,0.0884154111554748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19146115232040406,0.0,0.06921047278342625,0.06936332920913373,0.06581898094615977,0.08768653363484914,0.08556040683242262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05761789959912377,0.0,0.06045104845564753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15041435423128602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834012398201283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05433842796223802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008474798477984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135368946576526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483627455506978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05547736406345544,0.0,0.06259391414947736,0.06552871318809808,0.0,0.08193919837174002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06299841697927609,0.06850707664774568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05022237400528623,0.0,0.0,0.1828147040803343,0.09008562485566204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632386892684721,0.0,0.23115109316145965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnitedOutside4,2020/03/19,"I have depression and I don't wanna be here I know this sounds weird but I wanna kill myself. Im to depressed to try again, im to depressed to do anything. I feel like I cant do anything right, all I do is fail. I feel like my gf dosent wanna be around me even though I know she loves me. I feel like nobody like me or cares about me, even though I know they do. I just don't know how to make my life any better. I don't know how to get rid of the depression, any tips on how to beat this thing?",0.7305257936507951,1.7186425089285748,2.538333333333337,99.02888888888893,79.26785714285714,5.692063492063492,17.8015873015873,5.82211442006289,-0.6735746031746029,379,6,100,2,9,126,58,112,0.21600000000000005,0.59,0.19399999999999998,-0.6187,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,1,3,12,14,1,0,1,0,12,2,0,4,1,21,24,8,1,3,3,0,3,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,8,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,0,4,22,7,14,22,1,4,0,5,0,1,4,3,0,1,5,66,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877664228502358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22721761124379025,0.12289962964288947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220998296848496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075788859159316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4756317347367488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823701436567257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094166713391105,0.2958829540349186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212886717459248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29824960315221266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15273915564421778,0.0,0.3793614409524325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751344824610647,0.2697898941512424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12460145733887125,0.0,0.09215384198743712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789956858738472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171866007091793,0.0,0.2712797860704544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373135840671844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GaysMibble,2020/03/19,"Am I Crazy or is This a Thing?? So I broke up with my ex about a year ago and I've been doing great! It was a rough one sided relationship and the break up was godawful because I had to be near him a lot due to school and certain school trips. I loved him and it was the relationship itself that hurt more than the break up. Feeling rejected and unloved and like you weren't doing enough and being told certain things were your fault when they weren't and anytime I brought up the issues, it was me asking too much, Etc etc. My point is, ever since then I cannot listen to the office theme song without starting to panic. It was my exs favorite show and he made a parody of it for the school band trip and I remember the uncontrollable feeling of doom I got that night. It's strange, I cannot listen to the theme song. I've been able to get through it because I wanna watch the show but it always sends me into a pre panic and I'm not sure why. Does this sort of thing result from toxic relationships or am I just insane??",2.37822011585045,4.079902938388628,3.5219510268562395,90.69049894681412,76.48815165876778,6.205476566614008,21.674828857293313,6.937597516519254,0.4128702474986836,804,21,174,8,18,260,122,211,0.11599999999999999,0.79,0.095,-0.6584,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,1,0,6,15,0,3,15,0,21,1,0,2,4,31,34,17,0,1,6,2,3,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,16,13,0,0,3,5,0,4,6,9,0,1,15,8,21,6,23,17,6,22,1,4,1,1,18,8,0,4,9,124,37,3,0.130414672670851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560473855163225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085154549637529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219201142605088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589991479898448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412675890323208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13475321890845535,0.29089366717965426,0.0,0.11796753781170174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188315404970571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681362838034064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430452734195668,0.14378263702385252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13961160439456252,0.0,0.0,0.13611903547268311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371402156741234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087389103192936,0.11770433381421445,0.1234015165760254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586979011763593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223853357693824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837235736002573,0.0,0.0,0.3060270379365637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328401942143095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4200496563591587,0.14773440131501264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39595983374994337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10788036490136972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923081765570648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291428559802248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25992514082606744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461680853501475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767895738072374,0.0,0.0,0.1257150905962533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398277338702757
mentalhealth,dlylahnn1,2020/03/19,"COVID-19 + anxiety + quarantine in a virus hotspot.... I am living in New York City, and have been struggling deeply with the circumstances surrounding this pandemic. Our city has not reacted quickly enough, we are all unprepared and many of us not practicing social distancing. 
I am only 21 years old and as of Saturday was smart enough to truly realize the weight of the situation and have not socialized since. Due to the virus’s insane incubation period(s) it is safe to say, that many of us, including myself may already be infected. 
Though the last couple weeks before schools closed here,  I practiced conscious hygiene, I wore surgical gloves on the subway and washed my hands and sanitized my phone, the virus had made its way to the city long before we caught on to its airborne-like nature. 
I am worried for my grandmother who is a life long smoker, and my mother who is very overweight, and my sister who is also very overweight and has a history of pneumonia and has asthma. I myself have asthma. I am fearful that if I am, or my family, are to fall ill our hospitals will have reached overcapacity and our situation would be severely compromised.  
I am suffering extreme anxiety attacks as I sit in our tiny apartment watching our doomsday situation unfold. How slow we are reacting, and how this virus acts as a slow burning, torturous, and sneaky little assassin. The number predictions for mortality rates continue to excel and we are seeing more and more healthy younger people become infected and becoming extremely ill. 
We have no means to run, flee, relocate. We are stuck in a hot spot as our government does nothing to contain this issue, people are forced to continuing working, and people are still socializing. I am terrified for my family’s life and mine. 
I have been experiencing a sore throat, light and dry cough, and occasional phlegm which does not help my anxiety. For all I know, my symptoms can become worse at any moment.",8.492068965517241,8.991899356321841,8.455195402298852,65.43434482758623,61.18390804597702,12.592183908045973,38.66436781609195,12.07096230602999,5.18649264367816,1568,74,248,49,20,509,198,348,0.187,0.767,0.045,-0.9939,0,1,1,0,0,0,47.0,14,0,0,2,7,8,2,2,15,0,37,17,2,5,2,49,44,30,1,2,6,2,3,0,0,3,14,1,0,0,12,28,3,2,4,0,0,5,5,5,0,0,8,8,39,3,31,31,6,34,0,1,2,0,25,11,0,3,16,174,51,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086586102132805,0.07874244972834955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695959760006306,0.0,0.22597643764775824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201818765310192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262406722547844,0.16757297820329198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894968398340024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233482437091913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20348139680103544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856481361554029,0.11080053480011727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599903473565542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277191036159104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541138059628813,0.08026214222994119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390975267257836,0.0,0.09868782876894062,0.08694642634933854,0.17427690786909575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316999313134854,0.0,0.19965617350319467,0.0,0.10725728478843136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509814052884012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447985287557227,0.0,0.10332248644931392,0.0,0.0,0.07488709309122278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047897638067693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830334476017753,0.0,0.09965186818441277,0.07846388140850365,0.0,0.0,0.1112374580902876,0.0,0.08145129116525585,0.3320364611521888,0.0,0.3011180973784788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863430096113458,0.0,0.0,0.10293702946728583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234286881171756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674139303807908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368826172633603,0.0,0.0,0.16248792535946266,0.0,0.0781569584498588,0.07898270856121044,0.11990388114260755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168371529186131,0.099996018602193,0.10034427870733896,0.06994673293338198,0.0,0.0,0.06340825167088057
mentalhealth,MaleficentBee4,2020/03/19,"How does “manic anxiety” differ from other types of anxiety? A friend of mine just recently told me that they have manic anxiety. I’m trying to understand it cause it’s not something I’ve ever heard of. I suffer from anxiety disorder myself, so I kind of understand what they’re facing? (Even though anxiety isn’t the same for everyone). All I can find on google is about bipolar disorder. Is this what they mean? Or is it something else?",2.9290629183400263,5.643805975903617,4.640401606425705,78.21902275769749,79.6024096385542,8.990093708165999,26.08969210174029,9.444778638647367,3.0552688085676034,348,14,60,11,9,117,59,83,0.212,0.7509999999999999,0.037000000000000005,-0.9034,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,0,7,3,0,0,2,0,6,2,1,2,2,12,12,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,8,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,8,2,10,10,2,3,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,44,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6094808970749179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636881073741398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16647845605354147,0.3652394301998341,0.0,0.13944124146061587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13310977890535486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524387573660676,0.14413394441932226,0.0,0.1522580914062059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14563568401595456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231072193447668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16593015312684795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735701301369416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573309831914734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24533848361475105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655268742230458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522580914062059,0.0,0.1081827456949116,0.0,0.0,0.3317612436755123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fancybeaker,2020/03/19,"Why do I feel different? My whole life I have felt very different. It’s caused a lot of trouble for me in dealing with situations and social interactions. I’m hoping if I can pinpoint what’s going on I can find a way to navigate life a little better. Please be kind because I have never told anyone all of this and it took a lot of courage to be open and honest about it. 

1) a lot of times I can’t put into words what I’m thinking even if it’s something really simple. I am actually pretty intelligent but come off unintelligent sometimes because I can’t get my words out. 

2) sometimes, because of this, I end up saying a more simple version of what I’m thinking and many times I end up not making sense or offending other people.

3) Sometimes, when I do say things that are well thought out, people don’t understand what I’m saying, even though it makes perfect sense. 

4) Sometimes I feel like I’m simulating a personality. I don’t know how to think or act a lot of the time. I’ve watched other people’s behaviors and picked up things that I find pleasant in other people. I change my laugh every few years when I found one that sounds more appropriate. 

5) I believe I have imposter syndrome 

6) I can’t tell when people don’t like me, unless they’re super vocal about it. I don’t know if it’s because people are being fake and simulating niceness or if I’m just not picking it up. 

7) it doesn’t seem like anyone understands my intentions. Sometimes when I try to connect with people I don’t know well, I feel that the conversation offends them. I feel like when I talk about things that I believe may help them feel similar or connected to me, I appear as though I am bragging, even if I am not.  

8) I have impulsive thoughts, like saying or doing something that might catch someone off guard. For example, there was an older bald guy speaking to me one day, and the thought of giving him a huge smooch on the lips popped in  my head. It was gross and really embarrassing and it was nothing from attraction at all whatsoever just a very impulsive thought. Other impulsive thoughts would be like telling someone they’re ugly or something terrible like that. I feel so bad because I’m a nice person and I literally would never ever say something to hurt someone like that. 

9) when people I don’t know well talk to me, I have to try really hard to figure out where to look while they’re talking. A lot of times I’ll just look away to think while they are speaking so I don’t focus on the movement of their mouth and can actually listen. 

10) I am diagnosed with ADD and anxiety

11) I learn that a behavior is inappropriate or annoying only when someone does it to me and I don’t like it. There have been a few times where my husband has had to kindly tell me in social situations that certain things Im saying or talking about are inappropriate. 

12) When I’m alone and thinking, I catch myself making faces that go alone with the conversation I’m thinking about. I remember getting made fun of for this when I was in middle school. As an adult, I’ve been able to catch when I do this and control it. 


Despite all of this, the older I get, the better I am able to blend in. I don’t think people have any idea that all of this goes on in my head. I am seemly normal, married, and I have friends. I’ve been afraid of coming out about this because I don’t want to be brushed off and give people the impression that I am overemotional, crazy, or just overthinking. I’ve tried to open up about my ADD symptoms before and of course it was shrugged off. So I felt like if I opened up about all of this other stuff, somehow people would invalidate my feelings and tell me they’re not real. 

If you got through all of this, thank you so much for reading and for any thoughts you share with me.",4.229067688378032,5.396863599469493,5.317624521072798,81.80742017879952,70.83023872679045,8.025503487572454,28.551822379408588,8.401726058763845,1.9691962668238527,2990,110,591,46,54,988,286,754,0.087,0.757,0.156,0.9936,2,2,4,0,0,0,72.0,0,3,4,5,41,44,3,2,25,0,61,10,6,10,11,140,124,59,0,13,26,1,10,10,1,5,4,10,0,4,51,37,0,2,37,1,0,12,20,11,3,2,22,24,78,33,86,92,18,75,0,1,3,0,42,36,0,28,36,398,129,3,0.09461546852045824,0.0,0.09233104883054913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799309085487247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06434176309657545,0.0,0.036190287222112434,0.0,0.0,0.06615733550872319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04444717361286858,0.0,0.03949998206191116,0.17303013426312824,0.0,0.04025539747618518,0.10659923280452824,0.0,0.08367969306185179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04859807460040808,0.05004531006561421,0.08150284830424531,0.0,0.0,0.05305964663114037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030509574926639763,0.048772196746655685,0.0,0.04801635445414956,0.0,0.09885302672793864,0.0,0.0,0.041399317052321916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380122175022299,0.0,0.0,0.0937389369270402,0.042792554057277325,0.03985880648009102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674414831623922,0.0675933096160799,0.09084568746647596,0.0,0.08647682412396164,0.0,0.0,0.05187048881376475,0.03654983813754427,0.0,0.07414901578873251,0.09076377885973133,0.053772151174504124,0.0,0.0378363167316754,0.0,0.0,0.04684209462901201,0.0,0.0,0.042378437711175256,0.0,0.09710276726531918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031709377070391745,0.0,0.0,0.046987254466832655,0.0,0.0,0.050643907967407885,0.05340467366259356,0.05110047104900472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852745064348714,0.10399637418115194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682970352782938,0.23112169353589515,0.047414777916471536,0.0,0.0,0.07945316404252152,0.0,0.0,0.20109671963730155,0.0,0.044763722010189785,0.09473483990783947,0.04796261729737164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05018603007084933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03477662797893725,0.0,0.07297328218159255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04635153519197596,0.04539304691933849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411389013703409,0.035979663673054316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607694897047146,0.08261457762331513,0.0,0.051929685971758316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048128973180121146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04755733941540972,0.0,0.0,0.04732053640498075,0.05384655856923262,0.09091963785261192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053590440825196886,0.0,0.0,0.2257260544629111,0.0,0.04787795271074488,0.0,0.08613436903254519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635175084972576,0.0,0.09644855494969587,0.16033475887716753,0.14567922032122305,0.2339427941949971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541560374517045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04917084970430908,0.0,0.15209665925299132,0.1653961796649333,0.043554605712270766,0.0,0.0,0.12571662618348536,0.2121902013795752,0.0929592174323777,0.2253423400645582,0.1379276014293042,0.0,0.0,0.04520456741406215,0.052560633440400704,0.09635653860438408,0.0,0.0,0.09849803952351084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07806767046284292,0.02790332736781331,0.03755067746199366,0.0,0.0,0.1276060035912926,0.0,0.04268787192250048,0.052817395844957565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081817127978507,0.0,0.0,0.030464629818593693
mentalhealth,dustin4you,2020/03/19,"How to protect your mental health in a public health emergency? I want to start one if one hasn't started yet.  I thought I'd share some resources. In hope others will share more resources to help those who need help.

I saw this article: [https://www.bbc.com/news/health-51873799?utm\_source=pocket-newtab](https://www.bbc.com/news/health-51873799?utm_source=pocket-newtab)",15.43829787234043,21.209744319148946,5.650468085106382,71.29400000000003,52.61702127659576,6.313191489361702,26.421276595744683,7.554174236665415,1.5651906382978722,321,8,37,3,5,70,36,47,0.049,0.62,0.332,0.9196,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,7,9,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,4,3,5,6,2,5,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,3,3,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8145637281956521,0.0,0.0,0.2568245136662517,0.0,0.0,0.19028249514596388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19306791242664545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205438716087154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259639579439582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27120308721052777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520933822588763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11299904228645782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fl1CK02,2020/03/19,"Do I have bdd (body dysmorphic disorder) When I was 13-16 I had trouble even seeing myself in the mirror especially if I wasn’t at home I would go into like a panic mode worrying that I didn’t look normal because that was the way I saw myself. I’m 17 now and I’m a lot better at accepting it for what it is but it still affects me a lot I have trouble seeing my friends because I feel like the ugly one in the group I guess.
I don’t think they’d judge me for who I am but I can’t stop obsessing over the way I look. 

I look almost anorexic but I eat fine it’s just genetics, I have a small head and it makes it really difficult to pick a hairstyle especially because my hair cowlicks all over the place so I almost wanna go bald but what stops me is the fact that when I picture myself bald I’d look really weird. If I did I’d probably wear a beanie and it’s really hot at the moment so it’s kinda difficult. 

I’ve had supportive people give me the love yourself for who you are type speeches and stuff but I don’t think I could even if I tried. I don’t want to go on antidepressants because they fuck with me and there just yuck but if anyone has any advice I’d like to hear it",1.2089673913043484,2.8554236875,3.5930570652173937,89.1266711956522,79.703125,6.952173913043477,21.677309782608685,7.893859768569023,0.8936649456521741,928,27,209,16,23,322,128,256,0.14400000000000002,0.743,0.113,-0.828,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,2,1,11,17,1,2,15,0,23,9,6,3,2,41,46,19,0,9,12,0,3,3,1,1,0,2,1,0,17,7,1,2,4,0,0,3,6,8,0,1,8,12,37,9,17,35,3,23,0,0,7,2,10,11,1,10,10,138,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589324952296268,0.0,0.0,0.2375188766314473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065116378015899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829269489144128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891865982682137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489088743301854,0.0,0.13173638826930376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469138901094587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359243528478569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135604949405243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15666660845321884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059967051979034965,0.08472691486720556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162903967504983,0.1096425610523442,0.0,0.1137706528671723,0.20220707496048815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306498079759308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171645303637542,0.0,0.13366932266455187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189641378107886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738239612476828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3983720580629413,0.0,0.0,0.20165669935748406,0.1070399317464675,0.0,0.07916553439405688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620151753127278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036552940372055,0.0,0.0,0.13914998790532013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222138609578639,0.0,0.12391036964331725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786942736734833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279320382401529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18901557288624568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471305254004103,0.1983076003281841,0.0,0.0,0.13576710478529969,0.0,0.13458436735821655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519864802347716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805207131652776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995256944311748,0.1882762108024588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044270818081647,0.0,0.08424909372053811,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway190995,2020/03/19,"Do you think my roommate is doing ok? So my roommate has cleaned the whole house everyday this week while I’ve been gone and it’s starting to worry me some. I come home to it spotless and seeing him clean the same areas for the past 3 days. I feel like he is losing his mind and cleaning cause he’s anxious, stressed and maybe depressed cause he is out of work due to covid19. Am I crazy or should I talk to him? Thoughts on what I should say to check on him?",1.0324999999999989,3.1666289166666672,1.6748333333333356,100.1535,82.75,4.256666666666667,22.1,4.935628992294339,-0.2742550000000001,360,12,83,1,10,110,69,96,0.159,0.768,0.073,-0.8290000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,2,1,5,0,1,3,1,10,0,0,2,0,17,17,7,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,4,0,4,6,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,3,3,13,2,10,12,3,13,0,2,1,0,10,4,0,2,8,50,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347981273402384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.427014384611334,0.0,0.1790342976489854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13403851355402327,0.0,0.17901082870059948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508929252694182,0.1484797275760353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084787673568504,0.0,0.0,0.23981750060906626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015392981584613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23251790181255566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20880151408375025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20985744136042656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19840518079432834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528136321888887,0.0,0.0,0.16562022123527625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14710902296403824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380780776980199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16705255785949005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317439455850008,0.0,0.1650003994683932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16671535273108898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320440466927305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130876235645854,0.2110698887978685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheDumbJaymes,2020/03/19,I hate that cutting is not okay I'm in so much fucking pain,-2.11785714285714,-0.2880584999999982,0.6257142857142846,103.04428571428572,98.28571428571428,2.8000000000000003,21.285714285714285,3.1291,-0.6545999999999994,47,2,12,0,2,16,13,14,0.573,0.4270000000000001,0.0,-0.8665,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,4,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4940122008542445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5275752016390096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3928200532376742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5686024602453411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DuskyBo,2020/03/19,"Is it possible to hallucinate muscle tension? I had a rough night last night. I was panicking and my legs felt like they were cramping up really really badly. I felt like my muscles were seizing and like my tendons were so tight that I couldn't even fully straighten my legs.
Well I turned a light on and checked and my legs were actually straight. I clenched my muscles as hard as I could and let them go and it was obvious that I could clench them tighter than they were, so they couldn't actually have been painfully clenched, right?? I thought my calf muscles were rock hard but they weren't actually much firmer than they usually are.
I'm really confused if this counts as a hallucination or a delusion or what! I can't tell if I'm being irrational by assuming it wasn't real and there's flaws in my tests... sorry I know this is weird.
Thanks!!",3.051522727272729,5.455333254545459,3.8791477272727306,85.61872159090913,77.06060606060606,7.518939393939394,27.28219696969697,8.472884824447931,2.036401515151515,677,28,134,14,16,216,91,165,0.13699999999999998,0.787,0.076,-0.8334,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,7,0,5,10,0,2,4,0,23,6,4,0,1,25,32,17,0,6,5,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,7,0,1,5,1,1,1,5,5,1,0,15,7,26,5,10,11,1,10,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,6,7,89,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.4489693587881961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804852281077125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448896780493712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129230256819004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29449775611488993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715756522953197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747594335328525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428220341151484,0.12500821328863804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15682016827504974,0.0,0.2247706700251846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273665476766533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28783443314787344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16318499713134374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728894508050738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17455633960610226,0.29473748376061776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13096791541154246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716730641776879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13404269685138512,0.14119254318446162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12175007120578354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16681076700545913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689034879286569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13788833486928764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nateantonio,2020/03/19,To drink or not ..? How much more can you accomplish is alcohol was not a part of your life? Do you drink alcohol?,-0.9436956521739112,1.0391119130434774,1.5307608695652206,94.3291847826087,103.78260869565216,7.517391304347825,18.793478260869566,8.07648339933343,1.4585739130434785,86,3,20,3,4,29,19,23,0.0,0.8590000000000001,0.141,0.5579,0,0,4,0,0,0,5.0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,1,0,4,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,2,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,17,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6559060649638814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6012358139425172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21675289460236494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22558635998752494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323126642870387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Average--Boi,2020/03/19,"Perfection and anxiety I'm not sure if this is the best place to post this because I've only read a few posts. I don't know how to correctly express what I've struggled with for essentially my whole life, but I'll do my best. For a long time I've been a self-dkagnosed perfectionist, and it started as somewhat of a prideful thing, where I would always have better work than everybody else because ""oh, I'm such a perfectionist, ooh look at me, I'm so great."" But lately it's turned into a roadblock. I'm only half-assing my work, and it's purely because of the fact that if I don't try, I dont have to be ashamed of bad work. All of this (which has been going on for almost 5 years now) has been giving me some serious problems with my anxiety. Somewhat recently I had a severe anxiety attack where I was sitting on the floor, shaking, and bawling. This isn't really a post asking for help, I guess I'm more just looking for confirmation and recognition. Should I just try to ""get my shit together"" as I've been told so many times? Or is this actually something that needs to be addressed?",6.9818181818181815,5.704704090909092,7.764545454545455,75.0168181818182,64.9090909090909,11.090909090909092,35.45454545454545,10.230975488527342,3.4121363636363635,860,34,172,17,11,290,126,220,0.162,0.7170000000000001,0.121,-0.7388,0,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,8,9,15,2,3,11,0,21,2,1,1,6,33,38,15,0,6,8,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,13,8,0,0,1,1,0,2,5,8,0,0,7,2,15,7,23,27,9,22,0,0,2,0,5,8,1,8,8,112,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.11907350067941347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221849756081176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153005863889876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28003391565749713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140718283332588,0.1388148784000694,0.0,0.0,0.10188124580968927,0.22314599553127454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561040254851533,0.10791639556635003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430060295603299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193169514709258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06375019016698827,0.11705229194953655,0.0693465346761269,0.0,0.0,0.13452700883172314,0.13441831510103064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178714700976747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705876565120726,0.0,0.13764339194773992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618603220927656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079834814356538,0.20493141803168816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12370869421891448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047596648976214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560276574703014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748448213616242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505830617829151,0.0,0.0,0.1167562512442562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205259216993508,0.0,0.07816886227502,0.0,0.12047960674075213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272930250141338,0.13784738480285974,0.12525133712892286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939366278169918,0.0,0.0,0.08636608105102751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127561349882007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150020025119377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106438171597984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14230118730823432,0.0,0.0,0.11659493002336578,0.0,0.16568655954555958,0.13272225546952116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362304945018353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664951048570917,0.0,0.0,0.08667920299423519,0.0,0.0,0.07857660376109958
mentalhealth,em0teacher,2020/03/19,"Please Help I'm hella suicidal. All my purpose and joy comes from teaching and quarantine is literally killing me. Yes, I'm on meds, the right ones, a therapist, and decent family. I've been suicidal my whole life, but working with kids and bringing a semblance of happiness to their lives is the reason I don't hurt myself or attempt again. What are you all doing to stay sane? Is there anyone else this fucked up?",4.828016877637129,6.5134637215189874,5.3779113924050685,79.95690928270044,70.0126582278481,8.810970464135021,29.62236286919831,9.2995712137729,2.6917831223628683,330,13,60,7,6,106,64,79,0.168,0.6559999999999999,0.17600000000000002,-0.44299999999999995,0,1,0,0,0,2,11.0,0,1,1,2,2,5,2,0,4,1,7,2,0,1,2,11,12,6,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,6,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,1,0,7,2,7,11,3,7,0,1,0,1,4,3,1,1,1,39,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14367706890655074,0.2105395320041266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770036574454419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716529801230509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19370916714952371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18996384173818853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187383089191318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377295599737615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219971623668878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273342440387379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513728288688774,0.0,0.0,0.18144345732250555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282430305545615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13923922026562058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22555639559202245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126865557358931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17547962200170186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21901536935224333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44952565118951415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385792386527787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294121600855564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959259031554695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thrillhouse4,2020/03/19,"Crippled with fear by the coronavirus situation. I'm a 30-something professional in the USA (midwest). 

Once the first cases were confirmed in my state my motivation to come into work on time or get anything done once there was shot.

All I could do at the office was read every article, every FB post, all the comments, all the news briefings, memes, etc. about the outbreak locally and globally.

I now live isolated in my apartment (working remotely) in a state of fear with the same questions playing over and over in my mind:

I cough every now and again.  Do I have the virus?

I sneeze: Do I have the virus?

Did I give it to my parents unknowingly? 

Could I live with myself if I did and the unthinkable happened?

If I leave my apartment to walk down the halfway to get my mail, and I breathe, and then someone else comes in that hallway shortly afterward, could I have given them the virus?

And so on.

I ordered some food from a local restaurant (really want to support them) with no-contact delivery service. Not for me, but for the delivery person. I felt so strange as I watched the delivery person through my peephole checking my delivery instructions on his phone, feeling like opening the door to greet him and extend my hand to take the food was forbidden.  Because what I give him the virus?",5.316145689257724,7.0214204232365205,5.593492392807747,78.80710350391888,68.83402489626556,8.841032733978793,34.55071461502997,9.2995712137729,3.3385184877823875,1026,51,181,21,18,326,139,241,0.057,0.8540000000000001,0.08900000000000001,0.7691,1,0,1,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,2,4,7,5,0,2,21,0,16,5,2,1,3,37,30,16,0,6,5,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,3,16,2,0,4,2,1,4,1,2,0,1,9,4,33,3,33,18,6,36,0,0,1,0,14,21,0,6,8,133,36,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355636070612086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671146118001962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21680163205251998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014212216898739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877895951558013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512394708235603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034589832387556,0.0,0.0,0.3180792258066095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832120578178028,0.06362895386602144,0.08990078350325642,0.12082702456080452,0.0,0.0,0.10704022835160197,0.304334697253173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149338109081304,0.24143616815191465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112807162865261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324737186095775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061479520536847826,0.0,0.2222396883798627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270634632100179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680329608315767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397314573351965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21975888736064425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205208225686635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409706384619721,0.0,0.1258749814963968,0.0,0.0806169202761617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14145047464962354,0.0,0.0,0.10662460920861637,0.09687849375484547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428027928522734,0.0,0.0,0.0946167161234353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337885660961634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422423926161814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18322738745311587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uapoopyhead101,2020/03/19,"Feeling depressed I sit at home all day laying around and I literally don’t do anything. I sometimes get such horrid brain fog that I stop for a second and I’m like “wait this is me this is actually happening” it’s like I’m half asleep. My anxiety is always present. I can’t relax and I always feel tense.always. I have no friends and I’m not really good at much. Please tell me if your experiencing my same feelings. The one friend I do have is mean to me a lot and snaps at me. I just am not in a very good state of mind right now. Again, if you are feeling the same way as I am I would like to know if not alone.",-0.2490909090909064,1.905046742424247,2.0199242424242456,95.27488636363638,89.15151515151516,5.118181818181818,18.85606060606061,6.6274283507984215,-0.039766666666666506,478,14,113,6,16,161,84,132,0.133,0.6940000000000001,0.17300000000000001,0.5565,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,0,5,9,0,0,5,0,14,2,2,0,1,27,26,9,0,4,7,0,4,3,2,1,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,2,6,1,0,0,6,1,0,3,0,5,19,8,10,25,5,14,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,4,8,76,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.16032534571360954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701570205022347,0.0,0.0,0.41011245135296737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568297195472236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519836220874906,0.14625476038433258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18340426739273086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595478356724528,0.0,0.14150450574431878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322839965824981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25386326742297033,0.0,0.08583581753717441,0.0,0.0,0.2756007609506747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528292115295954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479832615241752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029061650840084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24079439725240434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396752295401449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17896221114455405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16588814057802906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077356369490172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132854799612524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803433397903018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524969700877232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403045168099233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624890427719737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13735551401787066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14359849704055944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355581509637336,0.0,0.1304073856438738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167083617004427,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kinda_Zeplike,2020/03/19,"How do I tell someone I can not handle them anymore I have a friend who never got over his high school girlfriend. She dumped him during college. He is one of my best friends but I can no longer support his bouts of depression. We are almost 30. Since then, he has been severely unstable and has literally been through every shrink and every drug the world could throw at him. I have been supportive of him this entire time. But I can no longer do it. How do I pull away.",2.4753763440860226,4.72886643010753,3.158279569892475,90.82408602150541,78.24731182795698,6.2838709677419375,23.23655913978495,7.3871296695380915,0.8943462365591395,370,12,76,5,9,116,67,93,0.185,0.693,0.12300000000000001,-0.8248,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,1,1,2,7,1,0,2,0,16,1,0,2,1,11,19,7,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,4,0,16,5,7,14,1,10,0,1,0,0,15,5,0,1,3,57,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20152756410968828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995906363780632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18908546550344346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21120444701909616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16068554415697556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17334042400280794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23339161952044554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3391316191820848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109778461284272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609618110806762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126366963755316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15522007260575996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637542926112858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036805546853032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22736058619277216,0.0,0.16648001153046532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17052249926356425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4567630178384539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17590552493185113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173532650205796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,babyysquidd,2020/03/19,"Feeling really stupid (literally) I posted this in r/BPD already but I’m looking for inputs as to why I may feel this way. 

Feeling like you are just flat out stupid?

All my life I have felt like I’m just completely stupid. I’m a little air headed naturally, things go over my head and I miss the point of most conversations that go beyond what I know. I’ve always been horrible with numbers. Simple math stuff like that. I basically didn’t absorb anything after 4th grade as far as math classes go. I failed all my math classes every single semester, managed to become president of the engineering club ONLY because the club sponsor was attracted to me. I didn’t know what I was doing at all. I suck at almost every job I get. I don’t mean to do anything half-assed, but when I work on a task at work I almost always am made to redo it because I didn’t do it well enough. Once I was made to re-vacuum a hallway three times. It’s not that I’m lazy, I try my best, I just really can’t do simple tasks the way I’m expected to. I can’t do any kind of sports, I was laughed at in 7th grade during field day because I couldn’t throw a softball farther than 5feet in front of me. I’m not overweight or unhealthy, I just literally suck. I faked a migraine that day so I could go home. The bullying was so bad. My brain shuts off when someone is trying to explain something to me and I start to realize I don’t understand it. It makes it hard for me to learn anything. It took me forever to learn how to drive and I still am horrible at it. Every car I buy ends up with bumps and scrapes and dents all over it by the time I’m done with it. I don’t talk about it, but it hurts me a lot. It’s come to a point where I just know I can’t do certain things. I don’t even try anymore. I know I’ll be bad at it. I don’t know for sure if it’s all in my head but ive felt this way forever. I don’t know if it’s BPD related or just me, but it’s been this way my whole life ):",0.8908030962747944,2.5564356226415117,3.205188679245285,91.44682631833577,80.74528301886792,6.424189646831157,21.95670053217223,7.419758726546812,0.6620565553942921,1520,47,353,22,39,523,191,424,0.14300000000000002,0.755,0.102,-0.9740000000000001,1,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,0,4,17,21,5,0,13,0,36,9,4,4,7,63,72,22,0,5,17,0,6,3,0,1,5,0,1,0,30,10,1,0,17,3,1,10,15,11,1,1,16,7,51,10,48,52,11,50,0,3,1,0,4,25,2,9,13,220,81,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17407705410567534,0.0,0.09591915571265673,0.0,0.14464997372280658,0.0,0.0,0.0591090577732448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620197976704462,0.0,0.0,0.2145849940511503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14515031042809012,0.15895815890714862,0.09599708598145316,0.0,0.0,0.0912179138211867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21894716189909197,0.09703224946531662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487448800351656,0.09113470196510157,0.0,0.0,0.0693991074813696,0.0,0.0,0.11211332361340748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895005603111715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698594224823273,0.08981232019292801,0.0,0.05741030368415955,0.0,0.21970332004747464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184915531715954,0.062096166640393816,0.1669150091782882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04541247910274425,0.0,0.1975961513889312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786387573028873,0.0,0.26761714960837857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718855085550631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305040887409978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625538432286257,0.0,0.0,0.0905145350710226,0.28661606678954393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278932427966174,0.12739519290472032,0.08711737796067502,0.0,0.0,0.07299149786441682,0.0,0.0,0.07389687224585195,0.0,0.16449293914898064,0.05802024331481855,0.0,0.0,0.09468212579513456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256771049338436,0.0,0.06610711041661457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16433631666299214,0.0,0.08324600509838694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136725444272796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364762845637805,0.06691580270658408,0.0,0.0,0.06152292002019283,0.0,0.06941498463345074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995034078161028,0.0,0.0,0.08192173265941864,0.0,0.0,0.06986356750442463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115492503818761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013683202827092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657209778239187,0.17704035242700938,0.0,0.0,0.09048751586131824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27597442863900645,0.0,0.0,0.07815214955765955,0.0,0.07843241360659117,0.09704385929698284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655861207216906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lolztrain72,2020/03/19,"Law of Attraction or just positive thinking? I remember 2020 coming around the corner and feeling energized/hopeful about a lot of things. I made a list of lessons I vowed to keep. I closed two deals in January and was leading my team in sales. I met a girl at a bar and we still talk to this day. I can remember smiling randomly on my walk to work and overall, feeling **great**.

I remember calling my dad and just being like ""dude, this is crazy. Every girl looks at me when I walk by. **Every one**. My friends make me feel like I'm the life of the party. I just feel really good right now and I'm trying to figure out why."" He offered no real helpful/valuable input but it was worth a shot.

It was nuts man. Literally every girl I'd walk past, I'd get a look. I can remember really hot girls just being around in me in public noticing me. And on top of that, I just felt fucking great in general.

I think a lot of this had to do with being excited about meeting a new girl, closing two good deals, and getting back in the gym. I think overall, these things compounded each other.

Until one day, I went on Reddit, and I posted a message very similar to this one, only my goal was to get feedback on ""why are all these good things happening to me"". I deleted that post 5 minutes later because I was scared that I jinxed the entire thing.

Well, the next morning, on my walk to work I just felt like no one noticed me anymore, and I saw maybe one decently attractive girl but she didn't even notice me.

I felt all around anxious again. My resting facial expression changed into something of confusion while walking/listening to music.

My posture got weaker, and I got weaker because I felt like whatever was going on, was out of my control.  


What was going on and what can I do to get back to that?

**TL:DR** \- with turn of 2020 was just feeling very positive. Girls were coming out of the woodwork in public all around me/noticing me, I met a new girl that I was crazy about, I got back in the gym, I had a good month in business, my friends made me feel like the life of the party. In general I just remember feeling fucking awesome. All of this was going great until one day I made a post on reddit saying all of the above only to ask what redditors thought was going on (in the universe, with my thoughts, how people perceived me, etc.) - basically any input on what I can do to keep the positive juices flowing. After that post, everything has gone back to ""normal"".",2.162376543209877,4.409248823045266,3.7036059670781936,86.5433101851852,79.28806584362141,6.519135802469138,25.76286008230453,7.645422480735847,1.5376119341563783,1912,76,372,30,48,632,209,486,0.055999999999999994,0.7609999999999999,0.183,0.9964,1,0,1,0,0,0,82.0,1,0,0,8,26,22,2,2,25,0,29,6,1,7,5,87,78,20,0,1,11,1,12,5,2,0,2,1,0,9,24,29,1,3,24,4,2,14,3,4,1,8,33,16,54,18,69,42,10,75,0,0,3,2,30,36,2,5,26,256,78,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04130704015520066,0.0,0.0,0.06862183036914836,0.060240321430175964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21629511217848715,0.056786116508327864,0.0,0.0,0.18682919109670207,0.0,0.07405623097747342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06202496981702054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425759982227844,0.10464871541096694,0.0,0.0,0.06812797314004368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175218249510376,0.12524587406456578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774403787345032,0.0401199039358949,0.0,0.15353474078789647,0.0,0.05459151790478471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21499292949911156,0.08678902846797901,0.23328962586692065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938591396289532,0.11231108045640886,0.12694197258501094,0.0,0.13808564148065644,0.20379199059796346,0.14574418039005133,0.2009067403053391,0.0,0.0,0.0537144665339795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079815994422962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858085670745672,0.14837879187885253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020169445041789,0.0,0.0,0.1032823456910122,0.0,0.17242830537258605,0.0405461465756022,0.0,0.06102409010917584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048484151128449116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173311325128398,0.06460042732377183,0.0,0.05951483556819266,0.0,0.2074675038674903,0.0,0.0,0.2469644821906549,0.0923949447815223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057985669711495026,0.04211125962587083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326984191526451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913835897533993,0.07782650958314677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34404753375792,0.05187383494869428,0.0,0.04830494092294438,0.060813923336005486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04676260887158815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048509106144548585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048822588229398216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614186952926061,0.11676418568277006,0.0,0.09644565356140627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04124022737117359,0.06607048885305591,0.11867335688982605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023798675803647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054614878017134,0.05630898403538024,0.10962146853179043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884426493635947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lunalee-x,2020/03/19,"Has anyone ever stayed in an NHS inpatient facility for mental health? Hi, I live in England (North East) and i'm 22 years old. I've struggled with my mental health my whole life and i hit a crisis point a few days ago after something traumatic happened. Where I live, there is an NHS mental health facility which accepts self referrals for people who have hit a crisis point, and i'm going to go voluntarily tomorrow to as for help. They have an inpatient facility which i may end up having to stay in.

I'm wondering if anyone on here has stayed in an NHS inpatient facility? How was your experience? Would you recommend it? Which area was it in? Which NHS trust is the best? What sort of things would i need to take with me?

 I hate hospitals, so i feel very scared about going, but i think it would be for the best and it would one million percent be worth it if it works and i get some kind of help, whether it be medication, a diagnosis, therapy or a CMHT.

Or would it be better to go to a private healthcare provider? What would be the difference? My Dad has said he's willing to sell his car if it means that I get the best treatment for myself. (He can no longer drive due to disability, however, he kept his car because it is now considered a classic car and it is in very good condition. He's had it since he was 16 and he loves it a lot.) Therefore, if there is little to no difference, i'd rather go with the NHS so he doesn't have to sell his car. If anyone has any stories or advice i'd be very grateful :)",2.709713423831076,4.474470529411768,4.347712418300656,84.85393665158374,75.73202614379085,7.844947209653093,25.4947209653092,8.617729084823388,1.7404624434389144,1186,42,248,24,26,398,156,306,0.059000000000000004,0.787,0.154,0.9884,1,0,1,0,0,0,36.0,0,2,1,5,11,12,1,2,17,0,33,6,0,2,1,41,56,21,0,13,11,1,1,0,0,8,5,1,0,1,22,10,0,1,5,0,3,10,3,3,0,2,6,2,21,9,31,34,8,38,0,0,0,1,21,15,0,13,10,162,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935884326714544,0.08106033678809457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062185629734337174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918210834841769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05574392817523022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287897166409777,0.0808755333797227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05897435937191524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19108079798793426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099298956453081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271709676336457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894506043750892,0.0,0.0,0.04623726076405872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555231354338517,0.0,0.2598510611169817,0.07669959662162408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086437359610589,0.0,0.0,0.09028285161921952,0.0,0.2916047792285413,0.0,0.0,0.12258710279021333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952257331709671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0645901977009753,0.0,0.09165175716505844,0.16149494529455447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777431363165156,0.08253254200421196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961024314992996,0.0,0.09212105989932484,0.27646468425004345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780519317295537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595598115664383,0.0,0.06196539294245384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339634088769835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288987043429607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698498735435381,0.0,0.09155224158052078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539691572822097,0.0,0.0,0.07564411996677707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039870854397423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924041099151281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559800580998658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06875514227767933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10457514867343504,0.0,0.060751891081707025,0.05859416368911587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263547196711643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020949027031329,0.0,0.0,0.0991680326011545,0.06657293557446843,0.0,0.0,0.3897587612131435,0.0,0.0,0.05888748143407796
mentalhealth,soopergamer2000,2020/03/19,"I don't think i'm mentally stable I haven't told a doctor this, but sometimes I feel like two different people in one body. sometimes (rarely) the 'two people' will fight and the mental pane is insanely agonizing. when this happens, all I want is to stop it; slam my head against something, anything. just stop the pain at all costs, even if it means brain damage or suicide (luckily I haven't yet failed to hold myself back). usually though, the 'two people' are separate; one being the part of me that wants to commit suicide and self harm and hates life, the other being the part of me that loves live and wants to live and live a great life.

also, this only happens when I can't cope in some way, it never happens when I can cope using electronics because they're the only thing i'm good at using, but ever since my mom died, I my legal guardian limits my electronic usage way too much(1-2 hours a day). now the only way I can cope is self harm, and that doesn't usually last that long. I didn't self harm nearly as often as I do now when I could use electronics freely.

​

am I mentally insane?!?",6.406911314984711,5.9820552110091745,6.650963302752294,79.73528287461775,65.69724770642202,9.468501529051991,29.63455657492355,8.841846274778883,2.179989602446484,868,25,169,12,12,280,124,218,0.248,0.629,0.12300000000000001,-0.9906,1,0,1,0,1,3,35.0,0,0,0,2,15,12,2,0,12,0,18,8,3,3,5,32,35,18,3,5,5,1,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,3,12,6,0,4,3,0,1,0,7,8,0,5,2,1,20,4,14,29,5,26,0,2,0,1,7,5,0,4,19,112,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212937171581972,0.0,0.09772687186007728,0.10959750054316143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422327612539822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935483259505991,0.0,0.054982387622770384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10018695482048254,0.0,0.10068809532062588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201383032708301,0.0,0.0,0.058168686580506015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360877066621644,0.09423518261231233,0.0,0.0923189967340918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05957332908996344,0.0815870647468007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045605594674869535,0.06443573945967614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756517721302989,0.0,0.09944094395744152,0.0,0.0,0.2392789571605348,0.0,0.0,0.08904946073790915,0.09256668519206836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882447652368489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352143490053396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741560930054527,0.044065003808055135,0.0,0.23893304540876,0.07982024887808348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140503126553154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982494269663162,0.0,0.0,0.27268778737048405,0.0,0.0,0.10563597168978926,0.0,0.0,0.06630412839568378,0.0,0.0695643906901096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223771684153314,0.2057934059555663,0.0959744550194797,0.0,0.0,0.19534604451809984,0.0,0.18759077280644054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822809785900495,0.0,0.0,0.07461071477278439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943696305613364,0.17841146729860874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15081508500159438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973186475702961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059921934704181765,0.05779368490609105,0.08861669814468037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618574071381009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643239234385242,0.0,0.0,0.2337000619532077,0.19867537444995292,0.0,0.1595990676482052,0.21477915638855646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959750054316143,0.0
mentalhealth,Elfanara,2020/03/19,"My coworkers think I'm annoying. Today I was given a ""talking to"" by one of my supervisors. Apparently she has been getting complaints that I insert myself in what other people are doing and am trying to act like a more senior member of the team than I am. She said that ""they dont find it helpful, they find it annoying"". I've always had problems with social anxiety and one of my greatest insecurities is thinking people act like friends to my face but actually find me annoying. She literally just confirmed that. I know I can get a little over-enthusiastic at times, but I am honestly just trying to be helpful. She says I need to ""stay in my lane"". I understand where shes coming from, and clearly this is a problem for me...but it just really hurt to hear. I teared up because I was so angry at myself and embarrassed. Thankfully I'm on anxiety meds now so I didn't have a complete panic meltdown. But it just really sucked. I'm going to try to improve, but right now all the negative thoughts are just piling together and I just feel like curling into a ball and staying there forever. I guess there isn't really a point to this post, I just wanted to get it out I guess. Thanks for listening.",3.4814102564102565,5.466175901709407,5.513170940170942,76.37488461538463,74.17094017094017,8.611623931623932,28.36666666666667,9.255337874911486,2.755214358974359,947,39,171,23,20,328,134,234,0.18100000000000002,0.687,0.132,-0.9072,2,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,2,1,14,17,4,3,9,0,20,1,1,0,2,38,45,12,0,4,11,0,1,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,12,10,0,0,9,2,0,4,4,10,0,2,8,5,30,7,27,36,3,24,0,1,0,0,17,12,1,2,8,127,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.1176334056390963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10030213695141392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844314254377061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734824100500827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383785017876744,0.12638792973508398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127649047119412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06095059078679885,0.08611654810885859,0.0,0.0,0.3305246759155959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313187687421803,0.0,0.18893755378049573,0.0,0.06850784596637656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655852745637324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13586167599707955,0.0,0.16159599886404832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904468095044647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624774560667109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766749036562926,0.12081660231483347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338970389263147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938173486084072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16336726033366195,0.0,0.0,0.1414322313821648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671398507166807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139528982674367,0.0,0.11544768366204032,0.0,0.0,0.2306883628204334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316704245330173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294378637037983,0.11466480239571827,0.09586130510542816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12287927118129292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25696740324877737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688857779084828,0.0,0.22196115677643072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15447925912973204,0.0,0.09569834933542908,0.07029008635020591,0.0,0.1142614717707227,0.0,0.0,0.2455240774407511,0.0,0.0,0.12549039553519367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109988391797539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TotallyNotHappy,2020/03/19,"I need to be calmer I’m becoming extremely irratable and I don’t know what to do.  I get mad or annoyed so easily to the point where, when my parents yell at me, I start feeling extremely unstable.  To the point where i have scenarios of me killing them, burning down the house, etc. run through my head.  Except I would NEVER do these things normally.

I would find help but I don’t even know where to start.",1.5611111111111102,3.9955799259259273,2.9249382716049404,90.12222222222223,83.07407407407408,7.550617283950618,25.049382716049386,8.515128840125781,1.9177012345679008,318,13,67,8,9,103,54,81,0.11,0.8009999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.3794,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,6,3,3,0,3,0,8,1,1,0,1,13,16,5,1,4,3,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,2,13,0,10,13,1,12,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,4,48,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415466561145066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439180943540385,0.14445508152306066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058572682277444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19989585579157726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426630674244695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244582980337843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659588000173646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252360559025323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24196885233451115,0.0,0.24039324323893896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16216978353567352,0.16868168829488508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142881607486345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428502093866721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4135009658083743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096063896803892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14530039020717425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107288737989978,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,panic_stricken12,2020/03/19,What Little Things have you all been doing to make up for social distancing? I’m used to seeing people to stay mentally healthy so self-isolation has me looking for new ways to cope,4.1853333333333325,6.358517628571434,4.805714285714289,81.38761904761904,72.71428571428572,8.095238095238095,25.952380952380953,8.841846274778883,2.157952380952381,147,5,26,3,3,47,31,35,0.0,0.922,0.078,0.4019,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,3,9,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,7,8,1,5,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,17,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122915210512325,0.0,0.0,0.2616541776794071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20798640249166306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140058973661459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.300932174973963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21601484071109175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24829409237501626,0.0,0.3250526649773849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176231889295681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33210974188807096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207004219662448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691106865319189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24732285368432466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Psych-aid,2020/03/19,"4 tips to make you Instantly Happy ! Hello dearest and beloved,  those  are [4 essential tips](https://www.psychaid.com/post/4-tips-to-make-you-instantly-happy-happiness-happy-lifestyle-empowerment-motivational) to make you **Instantly Happy !**  Namaste ♥🙏",9.330000000000002,13.560845999999998,7.9371428571428595,47.06285714285718,89.0,11.142857142857144,42.142857142857146,9.23628265651192,7.426142857142861,210,13,19,8,7,64,23,35,0.0,0.561,0.439,0.9421,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6922048192626644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6510718940740562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31138059820156305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SidTheNerd,2020/03/19,"Mindfulness app that is completely free A few years ago my therapist told me about “smiling mind” you can get it on the App Store. It has different programs for different ages, scenarios and audios of different length. I found it extremely helpful and it’s great that you get the “full” version for free. Pretty sure they’re a non profit. Also they all have Australian accents so it gets bonus points in my book. Anyways thought I should pass this on in the hopes that I can help improve someones day.",4.640564516129032,6.943735354838707,4.4233198924731205,84.05497983870971,71.79569892473118,8.090860215053763,30.97983870967742,8.841846274778883,2.7119258064516134,400,18,72,8,8,122,69,93,0.0,0.6609999999999999,0.33899999999999997,0.9890000000000001,3,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,1,1,4,7,0,0,5,0,6,0,0,0,2,10,13,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,0,2,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,9,9,8,9,4,11,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,4,45,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15833878909402285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284499854064772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18728314479627176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519725948037594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5598700308565601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19585124255650527,0.0,0.0,0.27996992526338943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19693283272237272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394548824178793,0.0,0.0,0.17741325331805685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607172518597244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688567665512683,0.0,0.0,0.18172412514057626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15134695310003482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835035819276098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073954333036125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14180695777609698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706822299103529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502755691039898
mentalhealth,comorvid19dxs,2020/03/19,"What are my options for dealing with debilitating exacerbation of symptoms due to pandemic? I have bipolar disorder, anxiety, CPTSD, and anorexia. I work in the ""call center"" part of a specialty pharmacy. There are hundreds of people in close quarters there every day, and I am the only person I've spoken to who is taking COVID-19 nearly as seriously as is needed at this point. They recently announced that they are slow rolling out a work from home trial- I am a part of the final ""stage"" of the roll out, meaning it will be a minimum of 3 weeks before I am given work from home privileges.
My mental health, my job performance, and my social standing with my coworkers has deteriorated rapidly. Where a week ago I was getting along quite well, this week I have had to go home midday due to extreme panic attacks, and I contemplate suicide all day at my desk. I am barely eating, not only due to fear of food shortages but because my eating disorder is my nearest and dearest unhealthy coping mechanism. I feel weak and dizzy, I can hardly go an hour without crying or hyperventilating, and I'm growing more and more obsessed with the idea of just ending it to escape this nightmare. My managers are sending out emails telling us that performance levels are unacceptable and commenting on whether or not I can handle my job. I need this job for healthcare and to pay bills, it pays very unusually well for my field and before this week I was perfectly content with it.
What can I do in this situation? Can I provide documentation of my diagnoses of some sort to attempt to leverage myself into earlier work from home privileges? Or at the very least is there some sort of leave I can take that won't risk my position? (I recently returned from an unofficial leave for acute treatment of my anorexia, I have only been at this company for 4 months and do not qualify for FMLA yet)",9.787327586206896,8.233735002873566,9.778706896551727,63.69323275862072,59.603448275862064,12.493103448275864,42.15229885057471,11.333407214811013,4.9123471264367815,1503,71,248,33,16,498,189,348,0.115,0.802,0.083,-0.7741,3,0,0,0,0,1,36.0,1,0,2,9,8,12,1,4,13,0,31,8,0,0,2,45,42,19,1,2,10,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,4,1,17,22,3,0,4,0,3,4,5,7,2,1,5,2,37,5,52,34,8,44,0,0,0,0,12,19,0,8,19,187,54,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807728125269282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06970692202277902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366270687087184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055546202229370976,0.0,0.15507364369044788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304420360725184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10009157466642783,0.1175303499144362,0.09394121949442544,0.0,0.09248537474188502,0.0,0.0,0.20886394145224985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864780099028571,0.0,0.0,0.08070570418666377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677293905341286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253587922427286,0.046073255348262135,0.0,0.0,0.09981803796406344,0.0,0.0,0.110183252795621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047606692830122005,0.0,0.10357174359832162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816260571475968,0.0,0.0,0.09685681513248053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656051059877708,0.0,0.08973532342308302,0.0,0.0,0.10286393693984827,0.0,0.0,0.2712690653011165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19296687483378894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925692162794864,0.0,0.0,0.09182801764740474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727315022099738,0.0,0.0,0.1351293708741576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20790370587589535,0.0,0.10691025676417742,0.0,0.19734921240518047,0.0,0.06317147152745824,0.07956289328390014,0.0,0.0,0.08613831156969316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691785260351156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17994097320735408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024232435345001,0.0,0.09288585992459744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967102171665744,0.0,0.0,0.0947090738765348,0.137022530068563,0.0,0.07964332065127011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960672472322697,0.0,0.0,0.15036788694311332,0.0,0.0,0.29236542875710536,0.0,0.16385651924386668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783689640889371,0.0,0.2653471948225893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImEiri,2020/03/19,"Maybe the last time I hugged my son. My 29-year-old son just walked out my door, maybe for the last time. He came to see me for the last time until this is over. My kids have all seen me cry many many times, I have suffered major depression my whole life and crying is just part of it for me. But I don't know if I've ever let them see me quite the way I was today, it was like all the horror and dread I have felt in the last few years, the loss of my mother, and our current situation just exploded. He broke the social distance we are trying to observe to hug me because I couldn't stop sobbing. So he left to go home and I have no doubt that if he gets sick, and we many of us are going to get sick, he will die. My kind, smart, funny, loving, dependable, hardworking, handsome, disliked by no one, loved by all, talented son with 5 serious respiratory conditions. He has siblings and nieces and nephews and we cannot survive losing him. All of these people making light of this situation, saying it's just a cold, I hope they don't experience the fear and anxiety that is flooring me right now.",3.5972701793721984,4.620165170403588,4.661768497757848,86.46422225336325,72.18385650224215,7.727466367713005,25.14826233183857,8.07648339933343,1.2671885650224215,855,25,183,12,16,280,135,223,0.18100000000000002,0.6559999999999999,0.163,-0.5597,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,5,0,2,4,7,20,0,3,10,0,18,7,0,2,5,35,32,14,1,4,7,5,1,1,0,1,3,1,2,1,8,15,0,1,2,0,0,4,6,10,0,1,5,7,29,10,20,24,8,26,0,6,3,4,24,6,1,5,16,114,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701287080799233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933650745444554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009137227034204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498820777819559,0.0,0.0,0.09796643957078692,0.0,0.11804698751226338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288680371276032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126220738448014,0.0,0.12799218432295748,0.0,0.0,0.10921085011662858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885175510889767,0.0,0.12928521994034214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140932239256688,0.11297218719078525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184455414966194,0.06251002524231976,0.370861997046577,0.0,0.0,0.12358179998348888,0.11630963929021945,0.08033984814094577,0.055568948478186136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127249011372068,0.0,0.0,0.20531449437580826,0.0,0.07592414999200918,0.3459518016723087,0.2285397041090401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935385288693452,0.0,0.07707501193970806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231722835033479,0.0,0.07885488171423279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209793854449864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713566289121264,0.0,0.09045277763080004,0.0,0.0,0.18127644582309807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557031697509368,0.0,0.1159463808611019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509400844139801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652971829787821,0.0,0.10781480062761926,0.0,0.0,0.07722384179703125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368184894882137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09028367823388404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698968684238104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649316720531266
mentalhealth,end_my_misery1,2020/03/19,"Lost motivation in life Im 15. I dont know where to go with my life. I dont know what to do. Every new thing i try is boring and uninteresting. I have 1 hobby, which is programming.
How do i get motivated to do something, how do i start doing something.",-0.5645238095238092,1.596603129629635,3.1519047619047638,86.205,91.77777777777777,6.048677248677249,18.825396825396822,7.447530270364453,0.6248285714285721,195,6,44,4,7,72,35,54,0.092,0.8,0.10800000000000001,0.2023,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,4,0,8,16,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,7,0,5,15,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,29,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5673498273126688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039333347870215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126458511901878,0.0,0.13755973994311432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614501132997142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26604318173845115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419270546915558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642206878502878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337685497584234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37267610137949625,0.0,0.0,0.1713206824936738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16080392941881816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643326530273095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gogogagarj,2020/03/19,"Does anyone recognize this symptom I have been having episodes of deppression ,  5 episodes now. Each lasting around 3-5 months , I have no reason to be depressed and they usually end on their own , but these are episodes of actual clinical depression,  not sadness.  I hate being stuck in this loop  for over 5 years and I was wondering if this could be a symptom of another disorder or disease, any help please?",8.505810810810809,8.423553500000004,7.889864864864865,71.4466891891892,61.2972972972973,12.264864864864863,41.47297297297297,11.698219412168324,5.120767567567567,325,17,55,9,4,102,59,74,0.174,0.667,0.159,-0.0629,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,0,2,4,1,0,1,0,10,3,0,1,0,11,13,5,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,6,0,9,6,2,10,0,3,0,0,3,4,0,3,6,40,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.2062934699027721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375755216660133,0.22166871552119435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781405035984813,0.0,0.0,0.1881885978488883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878370574508472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641527216665691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422798547396087,0.0,0.1849953807413648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872354428538158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20871126990023756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416952911758147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723171809893475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687354712154042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23205097842516556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217351842796315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4394458995992016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328244851554869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292515759802275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13613306193705402
mentalhealth,Saikujo,2020/03/20,"How to go about admitting myself to inpatient? (USA) After seeing multiple therapists, a psychiatrist, taking meds, and a suicide attempt, I really feel like the best place for me would be to go to inpatient care, I just have no clue how. How do I know where to go? Whenever I try to look online it seems the only ones in my area are for anger management/substance abuse. I know mental health services are really lacking in my area but I find it hard to believe there’s ZERO mental hospitals near me. Of course, calling the police is always an option but I’ve heard horror stories from people being abused by the cops and beaten up... oh, and I’m in the Midwest.",3.1837926509186367,5.5248260078740135,4.797342519685042,79.5181135170604,76.3228346456693,7.697900262467193,24.756561679790025,8.59863814320734,2.0657144356955386,521,18,91,11,12,175,90,127,0.18100000000000002,0.77,0.049,-0.9576,0,0,0,0,2,1,19.0,0,0,0,3,7,5,2,0,8,0,8,1,0,3,0,18,22,8,1,2,3,0,2,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,6,0,0,3,1,2,0,2,1,5,11,3,19,18,2,13,0,0,2,0,3,9,0,2,2,64,13,2,0.0,0.4037909682630764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178599267895314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19198182820300805,0.17882370979236453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17399689008328167,0.0,0.17373359563591506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615908176773006,0.12173340101032833,0.0,0.0,0.15574201010387484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905258025961507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15264443719022938,0.0,0.0,0.1811266469382671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18729416259864054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324856398124406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430926216642417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18927537496171304,0.0,0.34344513411291805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154670771813636,0.12959646009363968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813352322471404,0.0,0.1780311574045804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21832450178457413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578629982822826,0.15512525937501997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18638934117084494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12811917980355905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978468947961584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569004112505875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210468801645068,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cold-Worth,2020/03/20,"What is psychological testing like? Today I had my first exposure to a psychologist because I’ve been suffering for a bit too long without ever seeking professional help. Anyway, this morning I had a one hour interview of my behavior, past, basically personal things you don’t ever tell a stranger. This was actually over a Skype call because everything going on right now. But the psychological testing for particular things is in person later on. Should I prepare in any way? I’ve never open up to anyone about my difficult past and my interview turned into 3 hrs..I maybe brushed the surface and am pretty nervous about that. Any advice appreciated",5.9860000000000015,8.673703643478268,7.3645652173913065,62.74510869565222,69.08695652173913,10.165217391304347,35.84782608695652,10.355215969177356,4.708408695652175,529,28,77,16,10,180,84,115,0.067,0.828,0.105,0.6553,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,1,7,4,0,1,7,0,9,0,0,0,3,10,11,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,2,4,1,8,1,15,6,1,23,0,1,0,0,8,10,0,0,12,56,14,5,0.0,0.0,0.17189813003199406,0.0,0.0,0.17213288284829728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395776696864173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316899250998276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147602342927536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19231145289977794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987003759286854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3186776329266677,0.0,0.0,0.15831331166711515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14983409366687547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011076828184642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807041492365797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17347341770637886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605856303346338,0.0,0.0,0.15588824068513024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17696752476284114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585864027532227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193645903866997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.336312443895528,0.0,0.3076168111746214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17920906552694715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15043213515192172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15396388516617193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23405401789091565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16697071061898058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916018878983348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398205981391507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16980344015623589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TurboSpeedyFast,2020/03/20,"What do you guys recommend? I'm not sure how to seek professional help So I'm starting to get the feeling that maybe I'm a bit unstable. For the longest I've been depressed and neurotic. I had bad anxiety and was pretty unsociable. I would get some pretty strange obsessions and I guess you can say delusions. But after I moved states I've been going in and out of this happy energetic state, but it usually calms down. I've been really social and sometimes I feel so good I almost lose track of who I used to be. It feels like depression is foreign. I want to paint go sky diving buy a bmw I just want to go and live and love and have fun. But I'm aware this isn't normal. Nothing happened to warrant this and the last time I felt such an influx of emotion it didn't go so well. Only last time it was constant anger and irritation. But you know it's so hard to explain the extent of how I feel maybe I should just let it pass. Okay sorry for the rant.  But do you guys know how I can find a therapist where do I go?",1.5991509433962283,3.540589858490569,3.4053207547169846,89.52788679245285,79.66037735849056,6.692830188679245,22.864150943396226,7.734863291789972,1.0060935849056607,798,26,173,13,20,267,122,212,0.162,0.645,0.193,0.8169,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,4,0,1,12,15,1,1,9,1,19,1,0,4,1,41,45,22,0,5,8,0,6,1,0,2,0,1,0,2,12,11,0,0,9,0,1,7,3,6,1,0,8,7,18,9,17,33,3,22,0,3,0,1,12,5,0,3,9,104,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12303096204733842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399093976912863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258665293472204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413611756158772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277278223846695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21164587803136925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13820592770182527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484957558155311,0.0877743613076276,0.11796910434202712,0.0,0.11229584774743843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838316966401656,0.0,0.349133387038389,0.10305284049207904,0.0,0.0,0.13534900294699875,0.243310171478562,0.10864859478728944,0.13079145245831206,0.11006238115698336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235342626733133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350461365763356,0.20030179043271976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256371867699826,0.0,0.060025346146460726,0.0,0.10849152779654052,0.0,0.0,0.13745385082105158,0.0,0.0,0.11088992981963056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468676342281334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058542698225462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038103830725448,0.11789171809407198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09344392268711486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499945574656164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07871008919039857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770671275755692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12524479653144927,0.0,0.0,0.12151604624551615,0.13753665146971375,0.08696406401099598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11579825535828092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426550534471374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14328645472060342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611540452294467,0.13531779293703494,0.0,0.1449372283723663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046986284946386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727935395330877,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MissBvx,2020/03/20,"Struggling with obsession guilt over mistakes I made as a teenager As a teenager I was never the most social with the opposite sex due to social anxiety amongst other things. From the ages of 16 to 18 I took to online chat rooms to sext with a variety of different men. I loved the attention I received. At the time and still to this day I have had issues with pornography and masturbation. 

During this time online I would act out a number of taboo situations for sick men online. They believed I was a real person who did these things in real life. I had used pictures of celbritys in these chats and they ussualy last less than an hour.

It's been over 5 years now and due to my ocd I can't stop thinking and obsession over what I have done. I'm terrified me acting like this for these guys online and going online with their sick fantasy motivated them to hurt somone in real life.

I'm am so guilty I cry myself to self every night thinking about somone getting hurt becuase of what I did. I feel my family and friends would hate me if I knew. I just feel so upset and anxiety ridden over this and no matter what I do I can't feel any better.",4.9686842105263205,5.720490780701756,5.812561403508773,80.46226315789475,68.82456140350878,8.887017543859649,27.919298245614037,9.029198982220553,2.149817192982456,910,29,176,16,15,299,131,228,0.213,0.718,0.069,-0.9871,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,4,2,6,13,1,5,11,0,16,6,0,3,1,38,31,14,0,4,2,0,3,1,1,2,4,0,1,5,15,15,0,2,8,3,0,6,4,9,0,0,11,3,27,4,34,18,2,30,0,2,0,2,17,10,0,2,15,122,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858340917714676,0.0,0.19930190700077235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467619630397732,0.0,0.11520717079496065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14308795401416846,0.08400895559827122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609726705649575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330442924605654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975232240493384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280050506167632,0.0,0.1975948884167091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064098685753584,0.0,0.06805711966411858,0.0,0.07403155028059863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289809988267869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860789254416635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828296361806935,0.0,0.278898793312391,0.0,0.0,0.13596088557541292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618185355675636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840174309152,0.06363999543337043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175675790375123,0.1232581425277028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046697204720302,0.0,0.0,0.12224314237069946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374075843428025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4448039501211685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358928751914626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642123884741126,0.0,0.2655737547890778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402832016709322,0.108905826521571,0.0,0.13617932794703666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17308209787267725,0.16693473394544187,0.0,0.0,0.15191498107871734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14472715308321574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112505537956796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18507040920558185,0.0,0.0,0.0838851980042936
mentalhealth,Dateus-rapeus,2020/03/20,"Pls send me stuff to cheer me up Because of coronavirus I have to leave my flat and go home. 
This is difficult because lately I’ve become very attached to my roommates and I really don’t want to leave. 
Of course I want to go home and see other friends and my family but the whole process is making me really upset and I would really appreciate it if someone could send me some yt videos or something similar that can help take my mind off it until I leave in the morning :)",5.128350877192987,5.602357010526319,6.111315789473686,79.44837719298248,68.36842105263158,9.701754385964913,29.517543859649123,9.725611199111238,2.6294912280701754,376,13,74,8,6,125,63,95,0.087,0.727,0.18600000000000005,0.8854,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,2,0,7,0,0,1,0,15,14,9,0,5,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,6,5,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,2,0,0,0,1,13,2,11,12,2,9,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,3,2,49,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067841514131192,0.18731982144813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13541898995331306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15989227589156702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103949717912525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927854133205844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368534141055978,0.0,0.3402633238623523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913263462365001,0.5387743427341942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321532843412198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17125674580644792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3259676166849071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515641830295366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14370916024672148,0.1305732990424037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19416173308837648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752486429092127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994519271055686,0.2000795721252106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18936239793424928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048537142905848,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yetidogs,2020/03/20,"checkout my blog about anxiety! from a public feelings, sociocultural perspective. fresh with covid19 content [publicanxiety.us](https://publicanxiety.us)",20.682916666666664,27.895333125,13.7775,5.784166666666692,61.5,12.133333333333333,55.33333333333334,9.725611199111238,9.704233333333333,134,8,8,4,3,37,16,16,0.098,0.752,0.15,0.2244,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29713317852997645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19639215747295144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9344206733050124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chikachickaboom,2020/03/20,"Questions about Texas mental healthcare TL:DR - Is Texas really that bad for mental healthcare?

My fiancé is in negotiations with a company in Austin for a position. My mother moved to Houston about a month ago, and has been unable to get psychiatrists the controlled substances she has taken for 40 years. Also, my friend’s boyfriend’s mom recently starved to death in a mental health facility in Texas, near Midland. She never saw a physical doctor (they Skyped in a dr for her to visit with when she was in a catatonic state). I heard Texas is rated one of the lowest scores in the US in regard to mental health care. I take controlled substances and have been hospitalized twice in the last two years. Would moving to Texas be as risky as it sounds? Because from all I’ve heard, it sounds VERY risky.",6.3140939597315455,7.548132523489933,6.059926174496642,78.15445302013423,66.04697986577182,8.644563758389262,28.993959731543626,8.841846274778883,2.262991409395973,642,21,113,10,10,200,92,149,0.11900000000000001,0.86,0.021,-0.9279,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,1,2,4,3,0,0,11,0,11,4,0,2,2,10,18,6,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,4,0,0,3,4,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,1,0,3,7,5,11,2,28,9,1,22,0,0,1,0,13,10,0,1,8,73,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801524484686672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548867821941447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058055009685135,0.08803408543358447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14724078724302744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.323947558695063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478149421482388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157472379780436,0.0,0.0754509128546921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307012929632444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771755576785566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5821456896287167,0.0,0.0,0.16913718299034547,0.1152707299920526,0.30698072643372065,0.0,0.0,0.11138180384534904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785938800498042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617779278231319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251599093295057,0.0,0.14259245792291436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858215894374364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107253773564427,0.0,0.17371354622112764,0.0,0.0,0.11915755600135396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258832129443314,0.0,0.0,0.1859971387463072
mentalhealth,RhamenSouce,2020/03/20,"Meaning of being a psychopath I [19M] noticed that I have a lot of psychopathic traits. I wondered how this affects me or people around me. I also figured, it wouldn't be too smart to tell anyone irl because people would take distance from me.
Any thoughts?",3.0789795918367338,5.659465469387758,3.885061224489796,84.66351020408162,77.9795918367347,4.736326530612245,30.20816326530613,5.6839178017228535,1.4696824489795914,204,10,35,1,5,65,40,49,0.053,0.9470000000000001,0.0,-0.3089,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,2,0,11,9,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,7,1,5,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,27,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355809130432868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20032908798308185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059819011481,0.0,0.0,0.2622446585080444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17957734511406115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504471155436789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32089132568484696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353889609756841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084587132349811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214925699953007,0.0,0.2574817990177639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23386896937296345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3194667580425937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092659710954925,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spoochers,2020/03/20,"Is there an option for online anxiety prescriptions? I have GAD, and have been unmedicated yet somehow managing it for about a year now. It was fine, until all of the virus information came out, and now I find myself having large often panic attacks, and severe anxiety throughout the day. It’s making a huge impact on my life. I know I need to be medicated again, but I can’t get myself to go out in public right now. I don’t have a doctor I see where I live, as my old doc was in my college town. Am I able to get a prescription somehow online? I don’t have insurance & money is tight, but I’m kind of desperate.",3.6762044444444437,4.741617296000001,5.780266666666666,78.35857777777778,72.03999999999998,8.755555555555556,25.88888888888889,9.150863307647796,2.0664222222222217,482,15,95,10,9,169,83,125,0.109,0.8640000000000001,0.027000000000000003,-0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,11,4,1,1,7,0,15,3,0,1,1,19,24,7,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,3,0,1,2,3,2,0,0,4,2,15,2,15,19,1,20,0,0,1,0,2,9,0,4,9,71,18,3,0.21801448648559266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362186050216493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33356097085917524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24802295197052784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24935049281762064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14060130789474135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22314706498278905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19926129098239226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22780714194525484,0.0,0.12390265681557495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2270285387016798,0.11981506020109688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539900792591198,0.0,0.0,0.19251078577732972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14552636263936505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21962665884698102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16165497927753933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22876952958258365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25579302604560056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618318024778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737293192982988,0.0,0.0,0.24629431437232344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14039418141100826
mentalhealth,coffee-n-flowers,2020/03/20,"Intimacy Anxiety Hello everyone, I have been single for six years now and I met someone who seems to be interested in me and I am interested in him. The trouble is my ex really did a number on my self-esteem and I consider myself utterly repulsive. It has gotten to a point when I shower with the light turned off.   


This guy tried to as much as kiss me last time and I just couldn't do it - I was overwhelmed by anxiety. I find it really troublesome because I liked him and I also longed to be touched. I really miss physical closeness but my body issues prevent me from it. Also, what freaks me out even more is the prospect of me developing feelings for him (he made it clear he wasn't looking for anything serious - and I am find with that. At this point I will just take what I can get).   


Has anyone here struggled with the same problem? What helped you?",2.269108945353288,4.603196662721891,4.136762965541248,83.11038635572575,79.41420118343196,7.763452836756005,25.32579185520362,8.671277953709913,2.079768256178211,672,26,131,16,17,227,108,169,0.109,0.785,0.106,-0.1497,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,8,11,0,2,6,0,17,2,1,1,1,24,27,12,0,2,3,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,12,11,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,7,0,1,7,4,27,4,21,16,4,15,0,2,1,1,12,9,0,1,7,103,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27384457934411865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619612958568029,0.0,0.0,0.11971900937076076,0.0,0.14089712238297605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437238292615368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901836508896552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308731004232335,0.0,0.0,0.1636053202031304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657253343812862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3129787388818012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945389197618124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16953189310646655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476324375641353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17870621664967634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395648259105588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364804894707871,0.0,0.0,0.15152178618219936,0.14377928036852408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16200980325458908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12586430269232596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237110901890065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16383168519167704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32905826367894764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586965910971676,0.17861682418685726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450717320526256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17899333606364345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287339854376613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983809463320456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624520303916296,0.18623508843670264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025822834863336
mentalhealth,CulturalDetail0,2020/03/20,"I have no one I'm down, crying, I have no one to talk to. I have so many people I want to talk to but I've barely ever talked to them in the past so loading them with all this doesn't feel right. I'm afraid I'd get laughed at. I really want to though, it's just not appropriate. I have no friends, no one who loves me, nothing. I just wanna be held and told everything is going to be okay, that it'll all work out. Also I feel like my tinnitus is getting worse so that's just another constant stressor on me. I just don't know how long I can keep going like this. I have nothing.",0.4393832020997373,2.0987710944881925,2.6603346456692947,94.83937335958008,82.14960629921259,5.808136482939633,20.03215223097113,6.816661863887847,0.10106876640419936,447,12,108,5,12,152,76,127,0.138,0.677,0.185,0.8165,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,1,11,7,0,1,1,1,13,1,0,1,3,21,28,8,0,3,6,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,2,3,0,0,2,7,1,0,3,2,2,16,6,14,23,2,12,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,0,6,73,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334217385714655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494609147699616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18029456745453665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18326570092614716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509161630625076,0.0,0.0,0.14994486647274574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687184453534377,0.11919039609438906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890002603936285,0.0,0.17433383297973976,0.0,0.189637821664286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14829489205748506,0.0,0.0,0.09169079825677773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16301901093475096,0.0,0.0,0.1476479847970895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057944553715832,0.0,0.0,0.16914938433603102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201746014792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3391649264101423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15926748029588694,0.11566571958327805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688185670014146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14248028912435662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4022985669135976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16391926966324674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15942259155411526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19681288933541974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146137127428876,0.0,0.17002402347171008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iloveguineapigs1702,2020/03/20,"I hate myself I really hate myself and it’s ruining my life. I’ve suffered with mental health issues since I was 11 but I’m feeling really terrible about myself just lately. I gained a lot of weight after I had a breakdown and went onto antipsychotic medication. I’ve lost over 30 pounds since then but I still feel the same as I did before. I have stretch marks all over my body, keratosis pilaris all over my arms and acne on my face, back and chest. I feel ugly and disgusting. I have OCD and intrusive thoughts aren’t helping me. I’m not sure what to do, I try and tell family members and they just brush it off like I’m having another bad day. These thoughts are constant and they’re really impacting my life. I can’t talk to my psychiatrist until March 30th. Has anyone ever felt similar about themselves and have any advice on what I can do to feel better?",3.220175438596492,5.260764935672517,4.6583391812865536,81.96926315789476,75.08187134502923,8.068771929824562,24.265497076023394,8.841846274778883,1.89201567251462,688,22,131,15,15,229,109,171,0.179,0.737,0.084,-0.9519,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,3,7,11,3,0,3,0,14,9,4,0,4,29,28,15,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,11,1,0,7,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,8,7,24,3,17,20,4,19,0,3,0,0,4,8,0,1,11,86,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472371991267396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246370267622634,0.15799515933230732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535498608023004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585924951198776,0.12580676136067384,0.0,0.0,0.12821274642169966,0.0,0.0,0.13325918932401487,0.0,0.16736519954082232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16282540908022836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717246974936106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362935463580599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14204233677626574,0.0,0.30474184854161995,0.0,0.14467097359471964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29751938846944204,0.0,0.16015975355016565,0.0,0.0,0.10099381887662008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15726484095161186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16996719294137402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21285145270072106,0.0736118606291294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447881637576195,0.12809791649105498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517885230408991,0.15184427296408828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2895774778933913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492787047616205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032870451161436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14200876099458729,0.0,0.0,0.12110630888645388,0.13169599464918486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392371550660735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10229797099436776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834807266988437,0.0,0.1396766017735397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BasalGangliaaaaa,2020/03/20,"QUARANTINE 2020-GUIDED MEDITATION [https://youtu.be/uwYNNVi17OQ](https://youtu.be/uwYNNVi17OQ)

May of us have a ton of fear and discomfort right now. I made this for all of you and I hope it helps you feel a little bit better. 

Enjoy and share with you loved ones.

​

Namaste",7.8940310077519324,12.204807744186047,4.4933720930232575,75.61199612403102,76.2093023255814,6.587596899224807,23.44573643410853,7.793537801064563,1.7251271317829464,235,7,33,4,6,63,35,43,0.111,0.5720000000000001,0.317,0.8795,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,3,0,1,1,7,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,1,1,9,6,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,6,5,5,4,3,3,0,0,0,1,7,2,0,2,1,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854422312759159,0.3201141559313865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329954358016896,0.2876133897804935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29644853872114685,0.1332055600971069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17658143473483084,0.0,0.0,0.2616600379624359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640408070312332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377691347246674,0.24927775273173436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17851695228349265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22498034137108586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31689154688127713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201141559313865,0.0
mentalhealth,coolkatwizard,2020/03/20,"Anxiety over coronavirus Hey. I went outside (Brooklyn, NY) a few minutes ago with my partner to quickly get milk and I started to have a panic attack. I couldn't believe the amount of people outside. And what got to me most is that it's young adults walking with their most fashionable outfits, constantly checking out their own reflections on shop glasses. I just feel very overwhelmed by the superficiality and selfishness of people, especially attractive young adults. Social media has encouraged them to look their best, to show off what you have, and to be basically self-centered. This isn't the time of that but it's not getting through to them. I had to quickly walk back home and I couldn't bring the words to talk to my partner on our way home. I can't help but think I can't leave my home (unless it's nighttime because less people) or visit my parents. I'm so angry at people of my own age. We have created a culture centered around looks and sex and partying and the planet is fucking mad at us. Why can't we valued intelligence and common sense. You could still have fun indoors. But many people need validation from other people and that is so unnecessary and selfish. I'm venting right now but I am also asking for advice on how to cope with this reality. My partner listened but I don't think he really understood how social media and superficiality is harmful for us not just mentally but now physically too. Please stay safe and conscious of your actions everyone. We might not get the worst outcome but someone we love could and, at the end of the day, we should care about our loved ones' well-being more than external validation.",4.504066882416397,6.8458816504854365,5.255857605177997,77.76451995685008,72.3009708737864,7.814023732470336,30.214670981661268,8.626192665926032,2.6257279395900754,1326,58,228,25,27,429,178,309,0.095,0.768,0.13699999999999998,0.9335,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,9,3,5,1,16,17,3,2,11,0,23,5,0,2,0,57,45,28,0,6,14,1,1,0,3,2,0,1,3,5,11,24,1,1,6,2,2,6,10,9,0,1,4,4,34,8,38,34,10,36,0,1,2,4,36,12,1,4,16,166,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666889614562497,0.09676285334769708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872944003445235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835063242444461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971746391177612,0.10204891498504684,0.1241841033977544,0.0,0.08393652098112916,0.0,0.06654230368108434,0.0,0.0,0.12298479484497077,0.11455561949839772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129485960706853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796208263984505,0.0,0.17430913330792847,0.0,0.0,0.07039851440658144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09668246002865488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430608744940092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519406234651805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091572206468813,0.17109319185168453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730441164557362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316696623539473,0.0,0.3284860847398671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155836031107647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18333210891810908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19704049044955704,0.0,0.0,0.11067007694814343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100065817550093,0.11580043214128563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094000374509397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396895285048602,0.0,0.0,0.1280745485145503,0.12120813402288455,0.0,0.0,0.4540625720912082,0.0,0.0,0.11982378498561125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993004054845646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322117619808218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387662736417616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225476756541603,0.09249005320321907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726329095926561,0.1163489532492583,0.08717450590620464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773785674956551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13988933904635836,0.0,0.0,0.06365148160624022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626096355572418,0.0,0.0,0.09006759414022418,0.0,0.08664532084243637,0.0,0.0,0.09814703639527553,0.10119147210706282,0.09849900477959342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jebeidnednwosbd,2020/03/20,"How do I know the difference between processing trauma and just stirring the rage pot? Right now I'm 2 months out of an abusive relationship and making my way through ""Why does he do that? Inside the minds of angry and abusive men"". Hearing the different kinds of abusive men feels familiar and is bringing up lots of  scenarios and various ""well I should have said THAT!"" feelings, and urges to send him random shit without context to make him see his own abusive behaviors. I feel rage when I think of him, and what I think he and his family think of me. 

I know I need to get through this book in order to prevent falling into yet another abusive relationship. I also just recently got into therapy and am trying to make progress on my trauma so I can move on with my life and be successful and happy despite him. 

I know that if you try to run away from your feelings and never work through them you never get better. I am trying to process them, but not sure if I am doing that or just mixing them up and making it worse. 

I watched the xoxo talk on working your body through the complete stress cycle, and am trying to complete each stress cycle when it comes up and calming myself down with meditation, visualization, coping skills, cuddling, or exercise. 

But I'm wondering if this is healthy for me?? I can feel my body tense up, my heart beat raises and my blood flows to my head and I am upset... am I just making myself angrier and going further into damage, or am I working through it and moving closer to the light at the end of the tunnel?? How can I tell the difference? 

I want to make sure I am not moving backwards, I guess. Am I processing or just stirring?",6.293249427917619,6.484058099378885,6.740591696632887,76.92099869238315,65.83229813664596,9.387643020594963,33.71755475645635,9.134995656068208,2.9482273291925467,1316,54,241,21,19,429,163,322,0.16699999999999998,0.7659999999999999,0.067,-0.9862,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,4,3,8,14,17,3,3,11,0,20,9,6,8,4,76,52,34,0,6,17,0,5,0,0,1,2,2,0,2,10,27,0,1,12,2,0,10,5,9,1,0,2,10,46,8,44,48,4,40,0,1,2,1,24,19,1,11,9,181,56,5,0.0,0.4786472657071227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461213041759623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472112415553447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759100298288631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145705204701898,0.0,0.17949116807801302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959816725130646,0.16942508453526145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532422963364303,0.0,0.0,0.07070468461523159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156082969596098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616680473136184,0.0,0.20426315665927425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442462580153634,0.0,0.04591794334518659,0.0,0.0646195404173963,0.0,0.08900534981583437,0.0,0.0,0.08600830981763259,0.0,0.0,0.0829194902669966,0.0,0.09106239808324766,0.09574305393415393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413607783536907,0.1332092778543836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057068249518376926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868944297386956,0.0,0.0,0.3235897331008059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158042059276334,0.0,0.06449019552746063,0.2576184830993629,0.0,0.05990883787893307,0.1246289376094532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977580685768157,0.1734882555795869,0.0,0.06899891368083698,0.07685502041149765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438355113571984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293541745171976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18510193955108048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229760104347562,0.0,0.0,0.06494036067021276,0.07061882630209602,0.0,0.09239669315684478,0.0,0.0,0.15531147787525326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21941935786132366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04765527795454657,0.06413170545019024,0.0,0.0,0.07264485569113535,0.0,0.07290536984852304,0.0,0.0,0.07788397670628698,0.08761927088270499,0.1764602540523218,0.0,0.08233751483304409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theManInDespair,2020/03/20,"Question about depression I've been thinking about it for a pretty high amount of time. I know, self-diagnosis is extremely inaccurate and false at the most occasions and I feel stupid for asking something like this. I have all symptoms of depression (according to the Internet) but I can't say if I actually have depression or I'm just a dull piece of shit. I'm apathetic, I have huge problems with self-esteem, sleeping, I thought about roping myself. But still, I can laugh my ass off when playing online with my friends, for example. So, how does actually depression looks like? I'm really confused about it.",4.2671590909090895,7.017650553571433,5.343409090909095,74.88795454545456,74.71428571428572,9.429870129870134,31.61038961038961,9.800150414767053,3.7749000000000006,490,24,83,15,11,161,77,112,0.289,0.557,0.154,-0.9667,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,9,14,2,1,4,0,7,4,3,1,1,19,16,9,0,2,5,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,9,0,0,2,3,11,5,15,14,4,7,0,5,1,1,4,4,2,5,5,54,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.32711957080084114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566894704192325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5774369982417245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466735946047516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474689221957185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949238112020467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17708548997943915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211215977145468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637681584901713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074726351293787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17051608585818756,0.0,0.16037680330809095,0.0,0.0,0.18775766027862856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737302813595484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332874314576252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497003067094953,0.0,0.1720456835906578,0.0,0.0,0.1677275628208707,0.0,0.0,0.12903168714550667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338507828966428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174207349043612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739548997498972,0.0,0.1330608545713572,0.0977327093163383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WillowWispers,2020/03/20,"No motivation, no drive This is kind of a rant but also a question for anyone else who had pushed passed this. I have zero motivation for life. Not that I hate my life right now or anything. But I never strive for any of my dreams. Or I have too many choices on where I can take my life and I'm at a stand still. Do I do the whole starving artist thing for something I love? Or do I do a job that pays well with all the perks and benefits? But when I think I've decided on something I panic, then I change my mind and repeat. I won't take any kind of step to do anything. I need to finish highschool and every time I think about it I get sick. I'm 22. I feel absolutely stupid for not being further in life by now. And my partner is disappointed in me because I don't have that drive in life. I can't just get out of bed to start the day. I don't just walk into that school office. Instead I sit and wallow over all the things I should have done. I feel like ever step I try and take I'm ten behind.",0.5685515873015881,2.3648994398148133,2.5158730158730163,95.345,82.37962962962962,5.2253968253968255,18.61904761904762,6.1826913282559595,-0.3224507936507939,773,18,184,6,21,258,118,216,0.122,0.7509999999999999,0.127,0.2432,1,0,2,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,0,2,14,10,2,1,8,0,20,7,0,2,4,35,36,16,0,2,10,0,2,1,1,2,6,0,1,1,10,10,0,0,8,2,1,7,9,4,1,2,2,2,29,6,25,31,3,33,0,1,0,1,4,12,0,4,13,128,39,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106106878711806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18045854366106334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927753285255869,0.1359498380497348,0.2183742896987748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088257801218666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036145944511386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556982578664438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578119982493692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083996732749328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001974476705952,0.11179149938227627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341774422162294,0.09478905789572893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386432156363881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13099740237716107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13166781559555407,0.0,0.0,0.27633871684668404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4685910982044026,0.06482241427137099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197519619754027,0.0,0.0,0.1345201569106098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339724249478864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838307069432324,0.10233362900618828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15567539878467426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14863579036867594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331091109147355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13428269919625715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20429234975569324,0.0,0.0,0.09391400376581076,0.0,0.10596114628710622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992842453548758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762979298609052,0.17003634909782453,0.0,0.0,0.07736876606019086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008332893970523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929832435546417,0.0,0.0,0.1481362939937566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myboyfriendisweird,2020/03/20,"Lately I feel not myself. Not sure what’s going on? I recently started a new job as a flight attendant. During training I guess I was in the wrong class with the wrong people but I didn’t really fit in that much. Sometimes not everyone is meant to be your friend and that’s ok. But now I feel like I have zero friends. I have a couple good friends but they don’t really like to go out or hang out. So I barely see them.

It’s really hard to make friends in my job. You work with someone once and never again. I feel like I don’t have much to look forward to. I sleep a lot during the day and am not too motivated to do much especially during this time with the virus. I got laid off and now I got to apply for unemployment. 

I’m wondering if this is a sign to pick another job. I like the benefits and the pay but I like social connections. Maybe I should give it more time? I’m not sure. But I’m not very happy lately and I feel like I need to do something before it gets worse. I feel very lonely.",0.41907301066447994,2.5117287169811315,2.699122231337164,92.12840442986055,84.94339622641509,6.1397867104183765,18.179655455291226,7.423996415210882,0.3003931091058241,776,19,176,13,23,264,112,212,0.115,0.655,0.23,0.9814,5,2,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,2,2,5,19,0,0,11,1,14,1,1,3,3,42,36,15,0,3,13,0,6,6,4,1,0,0,0,0,8,11,0,0,8,0,1,5,10,3,0,1,5,8,26,16,21,29,5,25,0,1,2,0,10,9,0,5,19,111,34,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868145467744647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819477665130943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468189141437556,0.0,0.06684284133508392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990378179487816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620316623984132,0.2221333244159252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203053516576734,0.0,0.05415055120058071,0.09942630934520624,0.1178083725468472,0.08693301668802274,0.16578971828224726,0.0,0.1141773198653663,0.0,0.0,0.11033267462514162,0.09284610469887034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085568128443367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338335155883915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30381604582684146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703620503456136,0.0,0.0,0.08811578762433092,0.0,0.0,0.06918424667327562,0.0,0.1041259419129576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22857433757318146,0.07685190339028827,0.07993788071929912,0.10010157191001244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037918751917762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718548128426019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991940871624188,0.0,0.10233753179954064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259212875744977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372045738766814,0.10565364268434084,0.08781858542682926,0.07979145098845465,0.1025081543185213,0.0,0.07336089322552229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953695136870897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208731724415812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171036958813577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239923823281253,0.07545523541429262,0.0,0.10562372697218853,0.0,0.2266403987010172,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,archieenit,2020/03/20,"Where do I go I don't really have many people to talk to 
I have my family but I can't rely on them 

What are some fun communities that have helped you?
Especially in light of COVID isolations. 

Thanks in advance.",-0.06624584717607718,2.218362441860471,2.721993355481729,86.4883720930233,99.0,7.108305647840531,15.445182724252494,7.957251820313856,0.9469694352159476,167,4,35,5,7,58,34,43,0.04,0.772,0.188,0.8201,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,9,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,7,2,6,9,1,6,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,0,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4185267498072485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252313165215152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975775795045672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4501065893023364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30778653286377866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844126697028365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568388903601137,0.0,0.4087394752461219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SovicaOka,2020/03/20,"Will people notice the difference?  Well... I don't know where to start but... ok. In the past I have done  some things which I am really not proud of. One day I realized that  those things aren't going to work. So I made a plan, I went to see a  therapist but I have to wait a whole year cuz' our heath system is  fucked up, but anyways I have changed my attitude, my behavior  apologized to people and things got a little better... at least I  thought so. As it turned out I did change, but I have a feeling that  people don't care. No one ever calls me, I know a lot of people but I  don't really have no one to turn to when the times are hard and I think I  am a bit to old to find friends who I can really call friends and who  will stay with me for at least a good period of time (23)... Literally I  think I am fucked. The problem is also with meeting people, since I  live in a little town where everybody knows everybody, I don't think  things are gonna change. Do you think people will notice the difference after some time or have I already fucked everything up to his level that  there is no going back?  I am kind of weird, trying to do my best to be somehow ""normal"", to fit  in just a little but looks like this is not going to work. Any  suggestions?",2.8255192034139403,3.8000407451737495,4.305466368624264,88.47385084332453,73.98069498069498,7.923674049989839,22.125787441576918,8.371475516178862,0.9867868725868724,959,22,215,16,19,320,131,259,0.11599999999999999,0.742,0.142,0.6382,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,1,0,6,13,16,3,0,15,1,30,3,0,2,1,37,56,16,0,2,10,0,2,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,13,6,0,1,11,0,0,4,10,5,1,3,6,4,30,11,31,45,8,35,0,0,2,3,12,16,3,5,14,158,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09769071449941527,0.07079426250987125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020076015424682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807107989803797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290264400400654,0.07829411084424656,0.0966475353574293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18079002114407067,0.0,0.0902582236194532,0.0,0.2809465171399981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057091988598752585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18498179304280596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059290048876284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800768943593623,0.0,0.0,0.07956151938009151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04476143857251132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091121998279037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13679003704590476,0.2455227628928528,0.0,0.0,0.15093420913763486,0.07425146355953499,0.07080238150343568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793019662993331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218627434711464,0.14595483114739333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04324936392592671,0.2661791224619059,0.07817013761325957,0.0,0.0743395990694331,0.0,0.0,0.07526169507366423,0.0,0.0837655035440036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673674822012431,0.0,0.2015750243897117,0.09289321394114393,0.0,0.17996265894526367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450814634912998,0.36823696362728936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470748887323752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013619298745608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054381260857735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322967609483771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265920472515124,0.0943570069393744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278558506524424,0.23525113692993976,0.22689571270768394,0.0,0.07027980746326602,0.15486078191235705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060103387397173476,0.19258187649234804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959556433987153,0.08206454952247284,0.0,0.09883619056138164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12889605989049713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570078836709617
mentalhealth,phitresuca,2020/03/20,"Worth starting to look for a therapist, with just 6-7 months left of being able to see them? First off, I'm not actively suicidal. There's no immediate danger here for me, so don't worry about anything like that.

I do however dislike living much more than I like it, so I'm not *averse* to the idea of getting rid of myself somewhere down the line if I still feel that way. Years, probably decades away, that is.

I constantly hear people saying that folks in mental situations like that should see a therapist. I've got good insurance, so I'd be willing to try, but...

The problem is, my ""good insurance"" is completely because of my parents. I've waited an unfortunately long time before actually seriously considering this, so I'm turning 26 in about half a year. After that, insurance goes poof, and then as far as I'm aware, there's no way I can afford any therapist who doesn't work in a sweatshop-callcenter.

So my question is not *if* a therapist can be helpful, but *how* helpful they can be in that short a timeframe? Is it something that if you start and then stop so quickly, you run the risk of having some negative amount of benefit due to needing to stop? Or is it something that ""even a little bit is better than nothing""?",4.377329598506068,5.925601168067228,5.630532212885154,78.2446965452848,70.93277310924371,8.986367880485528,31.289449112978524,9.444778638647367,2.9808816059757226,970,43,181,22,18,324,144,238,0.11,0.773,0.11800000000000001,0.4349,3,0,2,0,0,0,42.0,0,2,2,3,16,11,1,1,12,0,20,0,0,1,0,24,36,19,1,6,10,1,1,3,0,2,0,2,0,0,14,3,0,3,3,0,1,1,8,4,0,2,1,6,14,7,29,29,5,31,0,0,3,0,11,11,0,6,20,124,28,1,0.11407818984420565,0.0,0.11132385731122296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757708100187599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387663015006492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718021458300614,0.0,0.0,0.06954100569355094,0.0,0.09707213730171924,0.0,0.0,0.10089288845143424,0.12454383731774275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11960881162326137,0.12327799620217353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534756849506548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576813604513139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703485000461104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05960114578994748,0.0,0.0,0.191366746476524,0.09123874965938086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857441090471758,0.0,0.1529284119750668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12878039068911626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394628705400805,0.0,0.0,0.1671985237378041,0.11433631563968905,0.10073313164175778,0.10095560818083968,0.09579694814284774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496398388635587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09105612276422914,0.0,0.08386059554024608,0.08458753228998359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946109986130942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667032957841756,0.0,0.0,0.0790874530543168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229955831955476,0.1091574210848413,0.0,0.0,0.12779368064574004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071955532738138,0.0,0.0,0.1818110951056058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12822866507367492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17564592779632995,0.0,0.0,0.16149025985789908,0.0,0.09110298977038783,0.1907489495859183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12478302405011435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5298142839393474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651990989065762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745160261516625,0.12408431217364148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18109991439133866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305028087126533,0.11585193927390207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692522811859335
mentalhealth,craw03,2020/03/20,"how to be happy w out depending on someone I haven’t truly been happy since like 8th grade or freshman year of high school. I turn 21 in a few days. I was too young to realize what was going on around me and then life started falling apart in 2015: family got evicted and we were homeless, I was dealing with bulimia and anorexia and never got help or attention from family/friends, entered my first relationship with a narcissist and/or sociopath that did a lot of damage, several family members died within that time and I lost my first childhood friend to a car crash, also I got in two serious car wrecks my first two years of driving which put a lot of stress on my family and me.




For background I’ve always had a rocky relationship with my family, even now I’ve always felt alienated and lonely in my own house. I had a lot of friends growing up but once all that happened I pushed everyone away. So I graduated hs and went onto college with depression and anxiety for the first time, and I’m about to be a senior in college and I can’t say I’ve made any real friendships that lasted longer than a semester except one and college itself has been full of depression anxiety and loneliness. I’m grateful for my one friend but she’s got her own life.



So I compensate by dating guys who I center my life and actions around. As mentioned before my first relationship gave me a very poor outlook on how healthy relationships should work and my parents are beyond unhealthy (dad is autistic and a damaged person overall my mom is pretty judgmental, neither feel any happiness and pretty much just live beside each other). I think I’m a fantastic girlfriend and I get soooo hurt when they break up with me and don’t want to work things out. A week ago I was broken up with after my longest relationship to date with my absolute best friend (2yrs) and I’m so heartbroken and broken in general. We tried to be friends during this quarantine thing but he’s already moving on and I told him I can’t be there to watch so I can’t speak to him or see him anymore.



Anyways it’s shown me that I haven’t been happy for however long and always depend on others to be happy. Maybe it’s not healthy to be alone as much as I am without a boyfriend or any friends or family to count on but this quarantine thing is hell for me and is throwing me back into suicidal thoughts. I don’t want to do that at all I just want to feel okay and hopefully happy one day. I know it won’t come easily or quickly but I’m willing to put in the work I just need direction. Much thanks to anyone who can read this and help me out.",5.071258549931599,5.860211023255816,5.924947560419517,79.61460328317375,68.6124031007752,9.248882808937527,30.874145006839942,9.402419484367199,2.7201221614227094,2072,81,397,41,34,682,258,516,0.152,0.6829999999999999,0.165,0.7796,3,5,0,0,0,0,31.0,2,0,1,10,23,27,1,1,16,1,36,3,0,5,3,87,69,49,2,6,17,3,3,1,7,3,3,2,0,2,22,43,0,0,8,1,1,15,12,10,0,10,22,7,53,17,72,38,15,76,1,7,2,0,36,32,1,12,29,282,75,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0538780313540867,0.0,0.0,0.0629500168137816,0.06707252598533367,0.04860595028030319,0.1517221307237889,0.0,0.0,0.1239979788398434,0.0,0.09299346185545022,0.0,0.06027768369055182,0.0424989695324223,0.0,0.0,0.10821463138123556,0.0,0.0,0.057105053057238585,0.046736266580773185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051719522792158516,0.0,0.06378513081816213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05235681032575805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783964762355613,0.06266177703883255,0.10469989412765646,0.0,0.06308031173110172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04014478710818748,0.0,0.0,0.05807814110056605,0.0,0.0,0.2864910892006359,0.0,0.06146464926947898,0.0,0.05835857919762572,0.0,0.0,0.2584982815845695,0.0,0.0,0.3287107353506859,0.0,0.031755176138141515,0.0,0.03454282124401357,0.0,0.1944460984873285,0.0,0.0,0.06018201117578969,0.053747781327741335,0.3882102884089633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147945134997034,0.06421767953507529,0.0,0.060368510328980565,0.0,0.07013225709860181,0.06506652316509551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033403240198695734,0.04954402241837536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879268091361726,0.02969416387867892,0.0,0.053670081268305636,0.05378861559497864,0.0,0.0,0.06634883137433305,0.15501960522232086,0.0,0.057511749626556065,0.0,0.0,0.061061938478668726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118510345542471,0.0,0.06459979521845649,0.13404144905947982,0.04506779108619429,0.046877481873607726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472899100644514,0.12355882726774595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674892835351753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05307097679114145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236707463551967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222018936111516,0.0,0.0,0.06079670589720128,0.06918123997777599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32627625302003044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04833490061999374,0.0,0.06151286589407483,0.04843399629676815,0.0,0.0,0.06866439101014182,0.0,0.05027805741760615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051498915276073566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043020579373213665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962358006506221,0.0,0.0,0.06648373710341754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05595829538565362,0.0,0.0,0.12113910781336686,0.038945535060648025,0.0,0.048252735548907986,0.07088291432234213,0.0,0.0,0.05807814110056605,0.0,0.04126580539062004,0.06611146710066619,0.11874696049542655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05015007818792939,0.107549312608112,0.0,0.04875425667570653,0.0,0.0,0.05634390800114076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058589999663393136,0.0,0.1327462549134735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828098665226457
mentalhealth,Killem2wice,2020/03/20,"Hey guys. My wife is currently on Instagram Live discussing dealing with anxiety during this current crisis. She's a licensed therapist in California residing in NY. Completely free. https://instagram.com/marcellecraig_lmft?igshid=1pc1jr8fvy4ri

Come join her and ask about ways to deal with your anxiety or tell her you've been dealing with everything Coronavirus related.",12.041132075471694,16.57610858490566,8.804377358490566,50.81939622641514,57.49056603773585,13.296603773584904,42.67547169811321,11.979248473330829,7.340904905660379,317,17,34,12,5,91,47,53,0.129,0.772,0.099,-0.1796,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,4,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,2,8,3,0,7,0,0,0,0,13,3,0,1,2,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3427003678788136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20939851576172852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929458028725592,0.2348471249563945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6927652852582624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013059445747677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217833056015134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977854811268776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19577535841678276,0.0,0.0,0.2600672969979339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17779122477454545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway62947901,2020/03/20,Is there anyone who has the same thing i can talk to I feel like my whole fucking world is caving in on its self i have schitzafrenia i hear voices in my head and noises and its ruining my life i cant get a job a relationship it even affects the few mates i have and also my family its just got to the point now were i put a fake smile on and go through the day like nothing is wrong just to break down the moment im on my own my 1 and only escape is my Games and lets be honest i cant do that 24/7 only my mates know and when i hit 18 i think im just going to give up and call it quits because i got delt a shit hand and i dont want to play no more but before i do go i want to talk to somone who has it too.,0.047246127366609166,1.1144756867469925,2.540309810671257,97.9686746987952,81.28915662650603,5.465748709122203,16.676419965576592,5.773587663045528,-0.7937507745266785,548,8,146,3,14,190,95,166,0.075,0.8420000000000001,0.083,0.2993,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,9,9,2,0,9,0,17,5,3,1,0,20,32,12,0,2,4,0,2,2,2,0,1,2,0,1,10,9,0,0,3,2,0,4,4,5,0,0,3,4,22,4,15,26,5,18,0,1,0,1,12,9,2,0,6,98,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299941078961475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754543798667453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375932606277944,0.0,0.1308784375795536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570541544539859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919279768575616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18026067090159265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015880798977516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14499556109875264,0.0,0.07776944593139515,0.109879759088419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14219210286543746,0.08035781487631223,0.1475456995922758,0.26223620578485396,0.0,0.24602703379274016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785036617579487,0.0,0.17335167927350173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322759296777282,0.0,0.15262972518676918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452831061238374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15727808905893725,0.10863844018434424,0.1502846725516169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14758197484680233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23395432470654215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453973398147045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461852741142496,0.0,0.16359268822796608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651311686930223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16045425609457106,0.0,0.15788068609132502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24724849799182355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218254348625673,0.09855332192295756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18143871968128844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17172003454439455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816382103710353,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SamSammySamSam,2020/03/20,"I’m constantly pissed off For the past few weeks to months, I’ve been super pissy. I snap at my amazing boyfriend all the time even though he never deserves it, and I’m rude to the rest of my family. I don’t even mean to do it, when my family asks me anything, without thinking I respond super nasty to them even though I don’t mean to. If they keep me on a longer conversation, within seconds of talking I’m already irritated and pissed off that I have to talk to them. Even simple little things that never would’ve gotten a negative or rude response from me before, like being asked to do simple chores, brings out this super nasty and rude version of myself within seconds. It happens so fast I can’t even control it. This has been happening every single day for a while now and I really don’t know why. Any ideas on what might be happening?",6.715297619047616,6.098568029761907,7.0721428571428575,77.6061904761905,65.1309523809524,9.609523809523813,31.16666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.412495238095238,671,21,128,9,9,219,100,168,0.15,0.735,0.114,-0.7651,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,3,4,10,10,5,0,6,0,13,2,2,1,3,19,28,11,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,10,5,0,2,5,0,0,1,8,5,0,2,3,0,17,5,23,22,5,22,0,0,0,0,10,9,2,3,13,95,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749634179313198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089289541402933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999020091829724,0.0,0.24990677276161535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373420486352273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444382009602075,0.1499102505074587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619917980087664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4414034773206911,0.0,0.1126137101118938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520041521779787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3545833860680541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15088506078232844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880251148317306,0.0,0.0,0.07345564612285863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529917399664653,0.13396171453283204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911882842216623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417913766406511,0.0,0.0,0.1066855640394094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061725568630855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275929089277968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562555885633083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21486053656246784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879728814975801,0.08564347124600348,0.2626391326942307,0.0,0.07793780243543821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107213414149372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060671300770825,0.0,0.0,0.12884277860507254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494771935518533,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Meanttobeconnected,2020/03/20,"Relieving the pain of stress, anxiety, and depression through Eckhart Tolle’s teachings!:) Eckhart Tolle’s teachings have made a huge difference relieving the pain and suffering I experienced from stress, anxiety, and depression! Not only is my life better, but it has made life better for all my loved ones around me. Because of this success, I was motivated to start an online group for my family and friends. Through connecting with them in this group, it has multiplied exponentially the relief from suffering for them and me. Because of this, I would like to start more online groups to help others. Please help by taking this short and simple online survey. https://forms.gle/jb99KKSH5XaUxoKQ8",7.861315789473682,11.054653201754386,6.6595087719298265,67.62189473684212,65.22807017543859,10.174035087719297,33.32982456140351,10.355215969177356,4.296430877192983,571,25,80,16,10,172,69,114,0.141,0.545,0.315,0.9859,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,4,1,17,0,2,5,0,6,5,0,3,1,15,12,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,4,0,0,0,7,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,0,1,3,1,10,9,17,8,2,6,0,4,0,1,9,4,0,0,3,56,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521625150889537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671823735808734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20093657346139449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915268637527624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28390585860558193,0.0,0.0,0.1721941835587453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553707371722544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733387627310674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22094094542273876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328241555641753,0.08051915583861438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14874988839371,0.31189950655974225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168134484446142,0.12534747829119972,0.35074464688129314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180914842455536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23331054202920226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775847615178178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239186324804646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707820701796025,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,712588Kf,2020/03/20,"Please help me, I don’t feel right (16F) I’ve been diagnosed with severe anxiety, but every teenager has it these days so my parents don’t take it as serious. Anyways, my grandma recently passed from cancer and she had a funeral about a month ago. Well going to the funeral I was fine, as a matter of fact I was in the room when she was gone before the funeral. I was fine during the funeral, but I didn’t wanna see her (I saw her once). But ever since then I haven’t been sleeping right. I’ll wake up at 3am and won’t go back to sleep for hours. I’ll have horrifying dreams or these thoughts will come up at the most inappropriate times. Like I was taking my SAT on the 14th and it popped into my head and I got distracted and I was freaking out. I don’t know what to do. I feel lost and scared.",1.5521428571428544,3.2569246904761933,3.5279999999999987,89.71700000000001,78.88095238095238,7.099047619047619,21.91428571428571,8.021203637495839,0.9292471428571432,620,18,140,11,15,210,105,168,0.23,0.6679999999999999,0.10300000000000001,-0.9787,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,0,2,9,0,19,6,4,0,2,23,34,15,4,1,4,1,2,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,6,10,0,0,4,1,0,5,6,5,1,0,16,4,21,4,19,16,1,26,0,1,2,0,6,11,0,2,11,92,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15359772357024482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325548065596696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323768472164804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744415795014715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492609636492507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174796093211052,0.0,0.0,0.1758703526531119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567370463363099,0.14599155707831854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17522596818340108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19695221133472,0.0,0.13858374802378465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778300135097918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116142497513123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064085018743366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522734081858003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465335240466093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18914999684506092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830635360842322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18453208882574915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19240124510606205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19020378137493596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710880369087669,0.0,0.0,0.2959515962414907,0.0,0.0,0.173478379830596,0.0,0.1380776429209486,0.0,0.0,0.1957512901720933,0.0,0.14333476875065146,0.0,0.34680002790169306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605622862191437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375608972725973,0.1010379741641268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155794923815556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vorpalmystery,2020/03/20,"Any services that would help someone with mental illness get a job? Down on my luck, I have major depression and suffering from psychosis, and need a job and no one will hire me. I've been applying for jobs nonstop with no luck. I've been looking for something that can get me hired or hire me regardless of my mental illness. Any sort of service would be nice, I've been googling for such a thing but no luck. I'm not sure if I am being discriminated against or not, I was just wondering if there is a service to help just in case.",5.97451713395639,5.619885158878507,6.252850467289723,81.99584890965734,66.57009345794393,9.37632398753894,34.65576323987539,8.841846274778883,2.7148641744548287,420,18,87,6,6,135,67,107,0.145,0.72,0.134,0.1918,3,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,4,0,13,2,0,0,1,24,19,8,0,6,9,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,4,1,8,5,13,10,1,3,0,2,1,0,2,3,0,9,0,59,11,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669644489839655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690621279031363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051042245871761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631347345740509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5843551398498914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16483205571167608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3956232461296178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554468702014434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330094834902247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16631375368270798,0.15111169988881987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18499863678365705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040468671499478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21286541033106846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788740029072595,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Colewalker599,2020/03/20,"Emotional health  

So I am part of this youth foundation group and we are big on mental health. Learning about yourself/emotional intelligence is something I personally think should be more available. Singer songwriter Jewel is actually hosting a quarantine concert Saturday at 5pm PT / 8pm ET through her facebook live and instagram. It will have to do a lot with not only mental health but staying calm in times of panic (such as now). This will benefit a lot of families whose parents are losing their jobs to the corona crisis as well. [https://www.facebook.com/jeweljk/](https://www.facebook.com/jeweljk/)",9.056520618556704,12.249369329896913,7.751121134020617,61.086887886597964,61.88659793814434,10.210824742268043,35.83634020618557,10.411451182825502,4.5623000000000005,503,23,67,13,8,153,79,97,0.125,0.7390000000000001,0.136,-0.4215,2,1,1,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,1,1,5,5,0,1,4,0,11,3,0,0,0,11,12,6,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,5,3,13,8,4,9,0,1,0,0,7,4,0,2,4,49,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.16389608765547328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3778448589962887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15832938970528793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5355726315926996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16666559346081158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830393567132938,0.0,0.0,0.1878943680115799,0.0,0.28557211041231745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33851049784565906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773441189855242,0.0,0.1970544784109894,0.1864898678626638,0.18187472040733532,0.0,0.0,0.1466484592915268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929699470417128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17901357109677793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761631042527743,0.0,0.0,0.0979336617109323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15100824706212568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mirimiranda,2020/03/20,Corona virus and depression Is anyone else feeling really depressed at the moment cos of the corona virus outbreak? I’m living in the uk and we are all now social distancing. The holidays I had planned are now not happening and I feel like I have nothing to look forward to anymore. I just hate the uncertainty as no one knows when it’ll be over and life will get back to normal.,5.3191891891891885,6.35511902702703,6.127945945945946,77.48867567567571,68.18918918918922,9.163243243243244,31.016216216216225,9.3871,2.841316756756758,304,12,55,6,5,100,57,74,0.19,0.73,0.08,-0.8748,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,1,5,4,1,0,5,0,8,1,0,1,1,13,16,6,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,3,5,1,8,12,1,9,0,2,1,0,2,4,0,0,7,39,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430061935155863,0.17133227725582953,0.2510645417892357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18841470915219616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42209191156153664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046930397874442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477913804953959,0.1750511197999249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128019260284819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216681248360739,0.0,0.0,0.2419186611415477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466334063935154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17307355572452274,0.11971040179363805,0.0,0.21636800480983656,0.0,0.20576541400751047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24007962284689754,0.2351150946593217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16604022390623208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697396195275876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24977956609795035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fxxk-you,2020/03/20,"My sister's obsession with repeating things My little sister is now 13 years old, past half year we saw changes in her behavior. She started doing rituals on daily basis. I can't sleep because of her retuals with hands and making noises for about an hour and a half, TV is not available since she watch her favorite show (40 minutes long) 5 hours, repeating every 10 seconds of it and rewarching it again and again, while doing something with her hands to match it. She have rituals for everything, it effects her and our lifes, yet my parents don't want her to go to psychiatrist. My dad think he can fix this by himself when I'm 99% sure he can't... I need help, I don't know what to do at this point, personally I can't handle what she's doing anymore. And if someone says anything about rituals she become agreesive or start crying.",7.97111111111111,6.801930401234567,8.040833333333335,73.48125,62.88888888888889,11.062962962962963,36.91666666666667,10.125756701596842,3.623022222222224,663,27,123,12,8,216,108,162,0.057,0.909,0.034,-0.3979,1,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,2,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,2,0,13,4,3,2,1,20,23,10,0,3,3,4,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,9,10,0,0,3,2,0,1,6,1,0,3,1,5,22,2,17,22,0,23,3,0,2,0,23,5,0,2,17,81,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18224730566489156,0.0,0.0,0.15122443478144604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202254771320518,0.20295601468876304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19440092878118048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20185922257041272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548314715141116,0.0,0.16515776832027165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443891862374607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231750257012054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3619466010731819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099343826716578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979993948431456,0.0,0.18418263075661784,0.0,0.16262785275483235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266577921670435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13626076841128748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19283236451685812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040513060966796,0.0,0.17542622318745826,0.0,0.16045809886861254,0.0,0.0,0.17371904343531494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461387509977411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520138123665108,0.0,0.1838995340406864,0.0,0.15570503010552908,0.14147267594822327,0.0,0.0,0.2601422018523824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17319805290929524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220865095113987,0.11775035797523845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10839043157643118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23667961389167885
mentalhealth,littlefreshmint,2020/03/20,"I feel like Britney Spears mental health 2007 I’m very worried. I tend to listen a lot of Britney Spears music and I start to feel like my mental health is on same level like her. I have a rocky partner and I’m living with him. We don’t take drugs but I drink a lot... I’m always playing video games which increases sometimes my depression. 
Corona virus is affecting me like hell. I am panicked by that. I feel like my life is really wasted at some point. I’m a very loved person but I don’t know how to keep it well for others. I have to stop doing the same and same things, (which it’s contradicting cause I hate routines) 
I feel like i can get things always easy and I’m bored of everything.",0.7265816536404763,3.0910493916083936,2.296182640888521,93.58237350884413,86.55244755244755,5.04302756067462,17.502673796791445,6.522977012572876,-0.13016133278486208,545,13,116,6,17,177,85,143,0.215,0.607,0.179,-0.8719,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,0,2,13,2,0,5,0,10,6,0,3,0,24,28,7,0,0,2,0,4,6,1,0,4,1,0,2,8,6,1,2,5,4,0,1,2,4,1,0,0,5,19,9,11,28,7,7,1,1,0,1,8,4,1,3,8,67,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232374183234921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780303116220086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553819119350273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13141023345890548,0.15556466827771034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056014508029315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713093249274943,0.3833305343048605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008480080330473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13243961212544292,0.0,0.2851779945826164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923351643629915,0.0,0.0,0.07372213667864552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475000597789923,0.3932164415787801,0.0,0.11845177423747458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22808918049245305,0.12107036557580045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703715777084455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712952939273608,0.0,0.0,0.12680961539246402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859362007739177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267203041971884,0.0,0.09494794557895654,0.0,0.0,0.1121505464197258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085973373205916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17823887363867005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22136600501167256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061173365379345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622993281544327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loulou1980,2020/03/20,"Do you find having a S/O with mental health issues exhausting? #vent My S/O is currently going through a particular bad time in regards to his mental health. I’m finding it mentally exhausting. I love him and I want to support him. However, one day
he shouts at me, pushes me away (not physically) and emotionally shuts me out. Then the next he’s telling me he can’t live without me and needs me and cries on my shoulder. 
I want to do the right thing by him but I never know what person he’ll be that day and I’m finding it really difficult. 
Has anyone got any advice?",1.6282753623188415,3.9154237043478304,3.949239130434784,83.81748188405798,81.52173913043478,7.311594202898552,24.36594202898551,8.344100000000001,1.7965507246376808,446,17,89,10,12,154,80,115,0.105,0.835,0.061,-0.7095,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,4,0,7,6,1,0,1,18,18,7,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,5,7,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,4,0,1,1,1,17,2,12,15,0,16,0,0,0,1,12,7,0,0,7,55,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14982504925046544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426461105549968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720671183554116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440516095993853,0.0,0.12801794878398606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16841765304132578,0.19776075818252048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17246726419112107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42040217731053786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713675469868506,0.0,0.12262607233437155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32594946258031743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600289375286191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426207942813689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353866458416544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13837961323626002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4635392919080738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368674923649655,0.1182518245993158,0.0,0.16306030167315494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389534723130224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387536164466404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09822236985518162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093664432409927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17398864516084073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340106916012352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018607083594854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940362852823222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18086725853579733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477974943737379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ButteryCwassawnt,2020/03/20,"I’ve relapsed. After nearly a year of staving off my urges I’ve relapsed and self- harmed again. Thoughts were relentless and overwhelming, and the guilt in the aftermath even more so. The shame makes me want to do it again. It’s a fucking cycle. I’m down on my knees fighting the pull so bad. It’s taking every ounce of my being to have the strength to resist. I tried to wait it out for hours last night. I’ve tried doing something else but ugly thoughts came so fast it was like swimming through a waterfall. The methods I’ve used previously failed. 

I don’t how else to continue.",2.8010988142292486,5.093028904347829,3.262924901185769,90.2897233201581,77.34782608695652,6.2687747035573125,26.10671936758893,7.348242739294969,1.268217391304348,464,18,93,6,11,144,77,115,0.16399999999999998,0.772,0.064,-0.9139,0,0,2,0,2,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,7,10,2,3,9,0,7,2,1,3,0,13,17,8,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,2,1,0,3,1,8,0,0,5,0,6,2,16,11,1,19,0,2,0,1,2,6,1,0,11,55,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961688542552518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687139323082537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3925319854578984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551786346574447,0.0,0.19795088481118528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172024159127538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313730187932348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915111352714914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478202127638212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568272864330883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22047950935470897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450983659775086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18087176403283425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664903415556768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3730393986540365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190238035787335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20291662442037764,0.0,0.0,0.13857636064425866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15129656305810366
mentalhealth,Gilgamasss,2020/03/20,"Conflicted So this is hard to explain but i have this thing that i sometimes wanna kill everyone in a gruesome way, its a very strong urge and i also see the images in front of me. But i also sometimes turn really good and selfless and wanna help others. These mindsets are very random and conflict eachother alot. I used to violently beat myself in the face with my fist when i got overwelmed. And this happened multiple Times a day, whenever something happens that i disliked. The headaches where pretty bad, but anyway. I have this pure evil and pure goodness in me and its really turnjng me insane. I sometimes feel like shoving a knife in my head to cool my brain off. Who has the same thing?",3.982913486005089,6.39972993129771,4.340782442748097,83.3851176844784,74.11450381679391,6.504071246819338,28.47391857506361,7.492282038375204,1.8650758269720105,555,23,96,7,12,174,85,131,0.21100000000000002,0.624,0.165,-0.8606,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,6,9,3,0,9,1,5,3,3,1,2,23,13,14,1,2,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,13,8,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,4,16,5,13,12,2,12,0,0,1,0,3,7,0,2,4,73,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627927320633676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371896045664864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18342111560193106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596451697413206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700252011289662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307863036158243,0.11738105859182026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756260786782405,0.1314114351377438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905925347824204,0.0,0.14718693043022385,0.0,0.1686265353559018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013161713638957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18178151394104872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802721725119487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16715943790614424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21051873128748574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309315231795046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649166902213815,0.4875119088887663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21831673501158386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095808818693801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17871899386711404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190862035609084,0.0,0.2711412076956775,0.0,0.13041936535920876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_needy_,2020/03/20,"I'm unstable and alone Sorry for long rant.
Literally the only person I have is my boyfriend. But I'm so crazy at times and can tell he's been ready to leave. For the most part I try my hardest to make him happy. I always help him whenever I can. We play around a lot, cuddle, and we have a pretty good sex life. The only problem is that at times I can be really unstable and I can't control my emotions.

I was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder and I've been on medication for a month now. I thought I was doing better until yesterday. We got in an argument and he wanted to take me home, but my parents had kicked me out. That's when I realized I have no one else. Some of my friends read my messages, but didn't reply.
My parents hate me pretty much, my friends don't seem interested in me, and my boyfriend is ready to leave me (don't blame him)

I just feel alone. I feel like if I died no one would really care. Sorry for the rant, I have no one to talk about it with.",1.5990196078431396,3.2632985098039238,3.6378431372549014,89.16696078431373,78.6078431372549,7.082352941176473,23.098039215686285,7.984000788550335,1.0859627450980396,752,24,168,13,18,256,113,204,0.201,0.624,0.175,-0.0004,2,2,0,0,0,0,24.0,3,0,0,2,6,11,1,0,8,0,22,6,0,2,0,32,34,14,1,4,5,2,2,1,2,1,4,0,1,1,3,14,0,1,5,2,0,0,7,2,0,3,8,2,35,9,21,24,5,15,0,0,0,2,17,7,0,5,9,115,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577916712839591,0.0,0.0,0.1035549144907349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078960774415096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006861677060202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268881876151345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958468769023266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12631723477352394,0.1291626262339116,0.0,0.14263398727517373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396456100153116,0.13999294001326396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585441165912772,0.08890928993835756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923042487268831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438532092725533,0.09953647997421892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248259508627666,0.0,0.12287162978172715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341826182884493,0.0,0.124836565068653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635556389312428,0.0,0.0,0.08790487581091543,0.060801478070364276,0.0,0.0,0.11013704056107766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580553994729733,0.0,0.0,0.08307338301645828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537336342442834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933724403159708,0.0,0.09148731783129543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25299784015518184,0.1893043182860322,0.0,0.0,0.276380787121265,0.13477053461332572,0.0,0.0,0.10866761040058476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253227004578504,0.0,0.11908476933771275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448673737580003,0.0,0.1594556322973779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329739042915922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786300199853228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357321170097548,0.10003065431318084,0.10877745871632814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880182699532343,0.14513915860173174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844954574833218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340563843613432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08840788210432607,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,youwill_never_know_,2020/03/20,"Multiple Personality Disorder? Is it possible to have a multiple personality disorder without acctually having different characters inside you?

I think i might have this.
My ""Personality"" can be extremely different from time to time.
From being angry, frustrated and maybe even manic.
To having a breakdown and being really sad for almost no fucking reason at all.
(Not sure if its bipolar, but its definitly more than deppresed vs happy episodes) 

Anyone recognizes this or knows anything about it?
Any comments would be highly appreciated.",7.500219638242898,11.254181709302324,8.855271317829459,48.59425064599486,69.11627906976744,12.194315245478034,38.62532299741603,11.20814326018867,6.679898191214473,441,25,49,18,9,151,67,86,0.126,0.754,0.12,0.6629,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,2,5,2,0,2,0,12,2,0,1,2,16,15,5,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,6,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,10,9,2,4,0,1,0,1,5,2,1,4,2,44,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723332283390394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036158093959645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375790014689605,0.0,0.14565048687344087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3698408624513476,0.405699539353314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690247102493198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16362754569169535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884127648172016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18700324405522686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727094352109457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17781365920540412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877620267055148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4636314281506746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19953346405222008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338650381681765,0.1819786927700412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668141842833053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341022364144845,0.0,0.0,0.2064125490415252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706153209765978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257310327297078,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bankrupt_Spetsnaz,2020/03/20,"Anxiety due to being conscious? Every day I think to myself, ""Is this it? This is what consciousness is like?""

I cannot help but think to myself that I am a collection of atoms and that everything is made of atoms and that the only difference between me and the computer I am typing on is what atoms it is made of and how they are arranged. 

I do not like this. 

You know how when you play a video game and after a while it gets boring? That is my life right now. I am playing that same video game over and over again, trying to play it a different way just to make it more fun, but it is already boring and I am sick of playing it. 

My life is like listening to the same song over and over again. It was OK to hear it for the third time, but after listening to it for hundreds of times, it is getting annoying and it is driving me insane. I need to find the stop button but it is not there. 

""What is stopped me from doing X?"" 

That question haunts me every day. I get pleasure from eating junk food. If I like eating junk food and it makes me feel good, why not eat junk food forever? I should just keep on eating junk food over and over again. Sometimes, I have to remind myself that eating junk food is bad. This is a ""fire extinguisher"" reaction that activates, telling me it is bad to eat junk food. Then I get anxiety and make myself stop. 

""What is stopping me from drinking bleach?"" That is because it will be a horrible and painful death! But pain is simply an input going into the brain. These inputs can be manipulated or even turned off. ""But why would I want to do this in the first place?"" Because I could die. ""But I will die anyway!"" Yes but not without living your life first. ""What is the purpose of being alive, to just experience it? Is it pleasure? So why not do everything you can to maximize pleasure?"" The meaning of our lives is subjective and varies between each individual. One can infer that biologically, the meaning of life is procreation and preservation of the species. ""So my purpose in life is to procreate?"" If that is what you want then sure. 

Some people panic when they are high or drunk. I am one of those people. I stopped drinking because I will panic. There is something about being in an altered state of mind that triggers this response. Why I cannot enjoy being drunk, I do not know. The fact that I cannot make the drunk feeling stop right away is one reason, but also the fear that I will be in that state indefinitely.  

But now I panic because I am conscious.",2.833998144712432,4.881787581632653,3.900528756957328,86.93281539888686,76.24489795918367,6.658627087198517,24.40166975881261,7.604176662624187,1.1777551020408166,1945,65,389,27,44,629,194,490,0.21600000000000005,0.701,0.083,-0.9976,1,0,3,0,0,0,69.0,1,5,2,2,20,27,1,4,22,2,62,26,1,12,2,86,89,39,3,8,24,0,3,4,0,6,8,4,0,0,47,17,17,7,15,14,0,2,10,11,0,6,3,7,47,16,52,72,5,49,0,0,0,0,16,19,0,7,29,298,94,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847169197902918,0.049619894391164994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493335136389988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058296292646505536,0.0,0.10361525049350724,0.15129593963273624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926627166449083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049540410106600416,0.0,0.0,0.0800318654200739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879239633043174,0.12965425035386902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156715761599475,0.0,0.38094457312210056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040982227179524634,0.0,0.1045565086924254,0.0,0.11152977795878016,0.06069501057183694,0.0,0.0698214349976848,0.06274683218728172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056710897864732615,0.1055562733250112,0.4501733177364763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296704191368066,0.0,0.035263401542741164,0.05204305616856779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993279043259068,0.0,0.041589576458439886,0.06555729202289423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05515125916831168,0.0,0.0,0.06820009654882363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21913226633209226,0.12125439516742258,0.0,0.10957933130165548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742294621394382,0.16567052532037127,0.0,0.0,0.13517728143448818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626509577696469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04600792745011421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261363253833191,0.04719042477427508,0.13204724258735562,0.2184004545448537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603276875044127,0.0,0.06482712517693451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695081441503229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379584677336879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597758618452358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04776770810181485,0.06136722083486641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31125026098344843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05847966032820207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05423283028265133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951591628483698,0.0,0.0,0.07236156689725096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04212663045657383,0.06749058493172562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319522956457833,0.049250944536215285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22395526840250088,0.0,0.0,0.05981221597171552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04407723550810316,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Crawlerplie,2020/03/20,How do I find what I'm passionate about after being depressed I'm trying to make a positive change in my life and part of that is trying to set some career goals doing what I think I would be happy doing. The thing is that I've been depressed for so long that I think that I've forgotten or I don't know what I was ever passionate about. What are some things I could do to maybe help me.,9.824658634538153,4.878140783132533,9.701204819277114,74.78706827309237,62.85542168674698,12.99437751004016,34.89558232931727,9.725611199111238,2.941951004016064,307,6,68,4,3,102,53,83,0.09699999999999999,0.71,0.192,0.8519,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,2,0,14,3,0,2,1,13,20,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,10,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,9,3,9,14,3,5,0,2,0,2,1,1,0,3,3,52,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24984336184657835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18856767266183846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4068368502457703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21363511493193074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158609910960564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25141421629445776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583040920106296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979639706102206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16681840694674202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090087208785552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764961029341773,0.0,0.2372709822444845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557560735984119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138102699784528,0.3026646578246145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32069660486008306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16777296956658394,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kiki_car,2020/03/20,"Seeking advice (I'm not a native english speaker so i appologize in advance)

Hi, I'm a 17 year old guy, who was normally really happy and confident. I enjoy many hobbys like riding motorcycles and listening to rock n roll / metal music. I am especially passionate about playing the guitar and really want to persue it as a career because I have quite a gift for it (accordiing to other guitar players I know). I am not the best looking guy but I'm also not the worst. I attend a type of middle school that is known for being very hard and intese. I have good grades and don't have a hard time fitting in with my peers. Everybody in my family is okay and have no problems...  
What I'm trying to say is that my life's going pretty well and that I have no need to worry or be stressed, but for a while now I've been feeling really unmotivated, bored and suicidal at times. I'm starting to lose interests in the things I once loved. I hardly, if ever, feel the the urge and motivation to play guitar which is strange bc I love music, guitar and everything inbetween.  


I have no idea what is happening to me. I feel empty, like nothing brings me happiness anymore and would really like some advice because I just feel lost and alone.  
I would really like to persue my dream of making the guitar my job and the fact that I'm losing interest in my own dream makes me feel really scared and worried.  


If any of this makes any sense please give me a good advice, because I clearly can't deal with this on my own...",5.130637958532695,5.707026175084177,6.597224880382775,75.6053110047847,68.39393939393939,9.619634945950736,28.42619174198121,9.682069395223575,2.604626936026936,1182,38,220,25,19,405,164,297,0.174,0.5920000000000001,0.23399999999999999,0.9612,1,1,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,7,7,27,0,2,16,1,21,4,0,4,3,47,48,23,1,8,9,0,8,4,0,2,1,3,0,2,14,16,0,0,9,10,0,5,8,8,1,0,3,12,28,19,26,41,5,22,0,3,1,3,10,9,0,4,12,142,42,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792570703433486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865927509498136,0.0,0.0761783405736527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295583525341067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447102444637416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17420644115889436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999681189438652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820752736417238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616693944283035,0.0,0.0,0.08561236892677257,0.0,0.08980141582906882,0.0,0.2408282812232098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09138081622962743,0.05413770918840798,0.15979694055974444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18864216077736085,0.08423694563013391,0.2028092952547968,0.2559992285844598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753546692467744,0.0,0.0,0.0945295519084099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05235168520408357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728403040815327,0.1861543383849052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999330871241772,0.213140217430958,0.10398611371550516,0.0,0.17194937509193395,0.0,0.19075774730666786,0.09657736097384084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063311216975805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333329159608772,0.09140328291199587,0.0,0.09995797170149116,0.10144739673726884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456543679128072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969123346063015,0.0,0.09114970207684027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131934323250932,0.0,0.0,0.366150939180868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575353428519725,0.09537056744982436,0.0964068806538521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742459160389214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911850840415672,0.0,0.0,0.1041975465651104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328564135719729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110922172483188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646743980719292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859839616269235,0.05618604386963335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564900308961276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19347964883913535,0.0,0.13533808160136826,0.0,0.0,0.06134347366164256
mentalhealth,David-Bowreee,2020/03/20,"Going back o work for the last 2 years i have been out of work, thanks to a nasty break-off from my previous job, that i thought would be my forever job, about my mental health. im living at home with my parents and i know money is tough. but im constantly being harrassed about going back to work. i understand they think im lazy and yes i am, but i have a severe fear of going back to work. ive had 5 jobs altogether and all have ended bad. the first i was bullied and had to leave, the second went into liquidation, the third i was embarrassed and shamed infront of customers, the fourth was the one i thought would last forever but was unfairly dissmissed and the last was temporary and i was treated like i knew nothing. im not sure what to do. ive tried going into a workplacement centre where they help people find jobs, but havent heard anything in months. everytime ive tried to hand in a resume i got the shakes and started sweating as well as feeling sick and light headed. am i just avoiding work because im lazy as my parents say, or what? sorry dont know where else to ask. TIA",2.9826126126126127,4.578028522522526,4.156036036036036,87.23288288288288,74.58558558558559,7.095495495495496,25.396396396396398,7.793537801064563,1.3201963963963963,860,29,177,12,18,281,123,222,0.192,0.691,0.11800000000000001,-0.9583,6,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,2,6,9,12,0,5,12,1,25,5,3,0,2,34,43,17,0,2,7,2,2,1,0,2,2,2,1,0,3,13,0,1,9,0,1,6,3,7,1,4,15,5,23,5,24,24,1,26,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,1,13,111,26,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647211630945477,0.0,0.08687546542142724,0.0,0.0,0.2143685014336356,0.07759129293144675,0.05664826131032578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042253592719763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891133733587913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762971442193352,0.0,0.08230693794548112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045702324705339,0.04698736733806173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493483088000749,0.0790448093818585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21125329762406064,0.0,0.07432329286562674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537129975816676,0.09877849345403944,0.0,0.0,0.06228791600680095,0.0,0.0932147147291078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5018928378098609,0.0,0.3688682041214321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10214198477673543,0.22724703143470185,0.0,0.09839770777381183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04540009916421728,0.0,0.08205743800997305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364992259630668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417452458171038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916726076100111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297065683219846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20637187681307104,0.0,0.0,0.06442481903025657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390035598260904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498258761040144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402568275414384,0.06577516638036668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758387271073308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555594189986207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595447361636769,0.0,0.14754946378120667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618450308820695,0.0,0.0,0.0967416925134696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355374937423599,0.08614551401422152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382647378888631,0.0,0.0,0.13202727110646334,0.0,0.0,0.059842812399196865
mentalhealth,Fitorenutrition,2020/03/20,Need Someone To Talk To Anyone who feels alone and is dealing with stress or anxiety during this difficult please feel free to reach out to customersupport@fitorenutrution.com. We are always here to talk if. ❤️,10.335,10.97473805555556,9.130000000000004,61.665000000000006,57.33333333333333,10.533333333333337,31.88888888888889,10.125756701596842,3.0051555555555565,174,5,28,3,2,54,31,36,0.20600000000000002,0.6409999999999999,0.153,-0.3182,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,9,5,3,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,2,7,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,16,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.308188485858081,0.0,0.0,0.2475986298634815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276370655206721,0.0,0.0,0.20806496540694291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3067773316709677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30091647549825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22064131193022568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3266379527598309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521265843219284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3408606829088693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4783443272411197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GraceLife777,2020/03/20,"New Post - to make you smile [https://gracelife701.wordpress.com](https://gracelife701.wordpress.com) 

GraceLife has been focusing on a rough topic this month, so today we slow down a bit and we enjoy some beautiful butterflies. My favorite photo showcased is the butterfly sitting on a little froggy's head. If you need something to smile about to day go check out the newest post ""Butterfly"" on the blog. Would love to hear about your favorite kinds of butterflies or other cute animals I could highlight a different month!",10.001365461847392,12.663918313253017,7.291746987951808,67.4230823293173,58.63855421686747,9.870682730923695,33.110441767068274,10.125756701596842,3.6725116465863454,432,16,60,9,6,123,64,83,0.0,0.708,0.292,0.9798,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,2,3,0,0,3,4,0,0,7,0,5,2,1,1,0,11,10,4,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,7,4,12,7,2,17,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,3,7,38,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25027671118460404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18303387732433649,0.0,0.0,0.14784438204906927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23951275436340294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302855002234421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352720196219536,0.0,0.2583763387796812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23872391028525006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297642152639015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20690301347067103,0.0,0.15302315091103344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659631408419151,0.0,0.0,0.16998263298044874,0.0,0.2214067317543613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43910763806320174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17648438529190574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21729792837482612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284942533633093,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GSAM07,2020/03/20,"I don't know how to help my depressed, defeated brother.  

As the title states, I (23M)really don't know how to help my brother(21M). He is depressed, defeated, I hardly even recognize him. He is a shadow of himself. He honestly reflects Reek from Game of Thrones and it is killing me.

So some backstory, after he graduated high school he decided it was best for him not to go to school because of his grades, attitude and really wasn't ""adult"" enough to take on college whereas I went to college. He was athletic, was the cool kid, had tons of friends. I was the awkward chubby one who had trouble talking to girls and fitting in. Granted, I had an awesome group of close knit friends and he had friends who wanted to party and do stupid shit and didn't prioritize the genuine ones. Throughout school I developed into a person who has confidence, physically fit, and got a great job out of college. I am not saying I am successful or bragging but just giving insight. My brother over the last 4 years has bounced around jobs that haven't given him actual skills and sat around smoking too much pot and other things that he shouldn't be doing in his current situation. Over the last couple months he spent a couple weeks in a voluntary mental rehab hospital, after coming out he has a stable job but just doesn't even resemble the person he used to be.

Currently, I live about an 2 hours away on my own and he still lives with my parents. I don't know how to help him, I have taken him to the gym, tried to talk to him but he doesn't give me anything back. I have invited him to come visit over the weekend but he still doesn't come over.

Any help is greatly appreciated.

Thanks",5.187655944055943,6.204248667692312,5.819979020979023,79.64806643356644,68.47692307692307,8.862937062937064,32.003496503496514,9.095868883498916,2.753430769230769,1327,56,249,24,22,431,176,325,0.068,0.7809999999999999,0.151,0.9790000000000001,6,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,5,15,20,3,1,17,1,33,2,1,4,0,42,52,20,1,2,9,3,1,0,3,1,1,1,0,5,9,20,0,0,6,3,1,6,12,10,0,2,16,4,30,10,42,33,6,40,0,4,0,0,50,19,1,2,14,168,39,12,0.0,0.0,0.0967740053933476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06743787932435266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160710320208968,0.17656171464640347,0.0,0.0,0.0931719302100604,0.07625434064088668,0.0,0.060452106337210626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407106619921172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562742603252626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194557883929692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082711084927665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246741597955801,0.0,0.1309995211454462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298516660115137,0.0,0.0,0.1902626372416137,0.056359659222799015,0.0,0.07931398951560653,0.2186669141992042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883536386875739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658818212505327,0.10477680757772492,0.0,0.0,0.0976608498160799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952278593928371,0.0,0.10971508739508737,0.0,0.16350099673998586,0.16167088381701106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17513494160618692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09993837318766104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791552316665412,0.0,0.0729001484597584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343980823026665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011471802965528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731799580260499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705957003416607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07886265306088193,0.0,0.3010909967472862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179488723920567,0.0,0.11146938154262608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583919464583768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456225831690146,0.15941552824632407,0.0,0.09130089393525524,0.0,0.0,0.06588304592229832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06732880076414567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564961500724402,0.0,0.0,0.058492062797659186,0.0,0.07954686944917377,0.0,0.0,0.0919300549249539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06386116669770728
mentalhealth,sardonyxangel,2020/03/20,"seeking validation I constantly seek validation/approval from others. I will admit my self-esteem is a tad bit low and I do try to cover it up by acting like I don’t care what people think but I do. I wanna be liked. I dress up and look nice for myself, but I’ve also noticed that I lowkey crave compliments from other people. 

SN: I do suffer from depression and anxiety and used to go to therapy for it. 

TLDR: I seek approval from others, how do I stop?",1.8555676328502424,3.9933436630434787,4.557536231884062,80.59422705314013,79.76086956521739,7.132367149758455,22.17874396135266,8.167268648758528,1.475785990338164,355,11,67,7,9,126,60,92,0.161,0.636,0.20199999999999999,0.4854,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,2,8,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,2,0,12,14,8,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,1,13,5,13,12,1,7,0,3,1,0,1,3,0,0,4,50,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20458150576394546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957038422546747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27929238346172586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26082852820271896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764537060139673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22033991589957266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453900673206017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499643242717648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21482683167145095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912561029101837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547108189561254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668791102927192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21387942559034226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925558171734369,0.0,0.0,0.16392100472354354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736869777195996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22094887484432146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MounetteSoyeuse,2020/03/20,"I have no motivation and feel so helpless, please help me Hello, I (22F) experienced depression some years back. After seeing a therapist, sorting out my life and meeting new people, I can proudly say that since 2 years I'm not suicidal anymore, I haven't self harmed, and I stopped self loathing.
However, I never got to regain my motivation and energy. I have a ton of hobby that I love but never do, I chalked it up to being tired after work and that's it's normal to want to chill without doing anything.
I'm now quarantined and I have to face it, I just have zero motivation for doing anything. It really frustrate me because I want to do those things, I'm genuinely interested in them ! What can I do to change that, I feel so sad and helpless...",3.686894977168951,5.528406479452058,5.481027397260277,77.43651826484022,73.24657534246576,8.428310502283106,29.28995433789955,9.075114841892004,2.684198173515982,590,25,108,13,12,202,87,146,0.156,0.665,0.179,-0.4604,1,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,5,5,9,1,0,2,0,13,4,1,3,2,25,23,10,1,3,4,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,11,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,1,5,19,3,15,21,2,13,0,4,1,1,8,3,0,2,10,80,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749608469083816,0.0,0.0,0.29035661280231595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13565578969965744,0.0,0.10754375626696938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18662855406966689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15194995084610358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17840611039936646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410988776709832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825034524390313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246103872865498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15922558513446075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721313569925477,0.17038715785207284,0.0,0.0,0.17285375953203386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230714368051762,0.0,0.0,0.19365575302649835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130189191003364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402959541564485,0.0,0.0,0.14058358736449308,0.0,0.3680882560499261,0.0,0.0,0.14593612375439433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749469279210345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929744183430091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20483676375712848,0.11720534919445673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20276838833886768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20811371269595305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700622076670115,0.0,0.12843557660471105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272168882901303
mentalhealth,neighborhoodpossum,2020/03/20,anxiety and frustration Ok I have always had a battle with my mental health and I feel like since it never was diagnosed as quickly as it should of it has gotten worse. I suffer from GAD and I feel like it doesn’t get as much attention as I want it to. I’m suffering and but I am able to present myself well enough to family and friends. I want to try a new hobby but I get easily frustrated and is a perfectionist. I’m not sure what else is wrong with me?,0.5470738636363635,2.7971796354166685,3.0553030303030297,88.7018181818182,85.97916666666666,7.240909090909091,19.14393939393939,8.296473431620573,1.0924291666666668,359,10,78,9,11,124,62,96,0.21100000000000002,0.595,0.19399999999999998,-0.4391,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,12,3,0,3,1,9,2,0,0,2,19,18,12,0,3,3,0,2,2,1,1,2,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,6,1,0,3,2,11,6,12,14,2,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,55,17,0,0.21152253407473412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600369306709174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16181415960453602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21469091957149186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17669993524069375,0.0,0.0,0.21855932123667127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19940462010221227,0.0,0.2139042975384271,0.3022234812143816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16342178512180727,0.0,0.2210235875668167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22483856248182407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066784514660452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131649637163668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549340063963318,0.0,0.1631392182290315,0.20428978148971608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17497362600017505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993574850990704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360991593294814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495229419143256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19018416096830634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155595330977969,0.0,0.23126668564703054,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,absrvdh,2020/03/20,"When your pet becomes your best friend What is it about our pets that makes life just a little more bearable? Some days I love my babies more than I love people, but why exactly is that?",1.907702702702704,4.3610602432432435,2.0499324324324317,96.84084459459463,81.70270270270271,4.781081081081081,17.35810810810811,5.985473137389443,-0.4935351351351352,147,3,31,1,4,44,31,37,0.0,0.745,0.255,0.8504,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,2,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,1,5,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,2,5,4,3,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,1,2,22,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35214733304606355,0.0,0.0,0.3346158349469339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20563336639728524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24634450907857625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22521482099969786,0.0,0.3195737870287511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5755533296300152,0.0,0.21283639745006935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210520492777996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877146216840693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1998Jack,2020/03/20,"Looking for the correct terminology of what I experienced Yesterday my boyfriend of ~2 years and I broke up. Right after we hung up, I experienced an [emotional breakdown?], and I would love to know what it is commonly refered to as so that I can do proper research on the topic. Here’s the timeline:

1. Hung up
2. Broke down crying/hyperventilating on the floor in foetal position
3. Layed in my bed still crying
4. Abruptly stopped crying. Became fully numb
5. I couldn’t think of him anymore
6. Realisation of absolute nihilism; his absence removed my sole purpose in life.
7. Consequently, any action leads right back to the realisation of its lack of fundation, thus rendering its very thought pointless
8. Lack of desires. I need to pee and yet I’d rather piss the bed than go to the bathroom, because of #7
9. Fully immobile, any thoughts annihilates themselves instantly, again because of their lack of existential foundation.
10. Dissociation. My body lays there as I’m on a whole other plane of existence
10. I don’t want to sleep, or drink, or smoke. I want to cease to exist. 

The only thing that kept me from ending it all was the thought of a goal of mine, a secondary purpose, that is to move abroad. It defeated the cyclic nature of nihilism as it lays outside of it’s realm. This goal lies on an illogical attribution of value; nihilism being a fatal yet rational philosophy, it couldn’t touch this irrationality.

I somehow got up to go to the bathroom. My movements were extremly slow, I’m talking 15 seconds to turn a door handle. Went back to my room and I managed to fade into falling asleep. Woke up and got out of bed, took a shower and shared this experience with my mom. She says it sounds like a psychosis, although I feel like that’s not the correct term for it. Does anyone know what this would be refered to as? (Dissociation, numbness, absolute nihilism). I’m doing a lot better today, I still feel sadness when I think about him, but it’s nothing compared to yesterday. I feel like my body completely shutdown to protect myself. I wouldn’t have been able to do anything, even if someone’s life depended on it. 

Some general info, in case it can help: 19, male, gay, never experienced mental illnesses, first break up.

Thank you! :)",4.114709207386007,6.522770801909314,5.326014947870871,76.51679782690616,73.67780429594272,7.942745886195202,31.31271197085793,8.766177420268882,2.8891250596658717,1782,85,310,37,38,590,239,419,0.077,0.838,0.085,0.8905,1,0,2,0,0,0,74.0,1,1,1,6,15,15,1,0,22,0,19,14,6,4,4,55,47,17,1,14,6,1,4,3,0,3,5,2,6,1,26,10,1,3,13,1,0,10,6,8,0,2,12,10,34,7,64,28,8,55,0,4,1,2,14,22,1,7,25,201,60,5,0.11434775965232685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15552079543068206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11340225141550593,0.07995461226674681,0.0,0.09409846313331248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17585273781333746,0.0,0.1394106658930503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011313010403594,0.0,0.2540291662331535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989145043829624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512112892418835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006649504770544,0.0,0.0,0.1120172718125226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286258388211862,0.10127817483875662,0.0,0.0,0.07552561681095614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118540505547668,0.0,0.0,0.1734529891378994,0.16338012468677005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726414594568912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997293391114526,0.0,0.18290869852121205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664489294762937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568507650531285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16153440861489024,0.16759361831305733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602331888877852,0.0,0.0,0.09721437614182686,0.10320331752083073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523564684944655,0.0,0.0,0.13392271409321255,0.0,0.12153357213196747,0.0,0.08478741488699884,0.08819204155965167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971975936253966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696662392298736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953047239150863,0.0,0.0909339280585392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443034023681473,0.0,0.09688648568091103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263653713474196,0.09559984722308544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190839779238813,0.0,0.10527605398184374,0.0,0.0,0.07596757052480417,0.14653885445008466,0.0,0.2723380451857451,0.0,0.0,0.10838830581781177,0.0,0.12704456837345654,0.0,0.12437752671595832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943488771793378,0.1348905425824744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600151879888876,0.0,0.12766519005790494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16245873531902474,0.0,0.0,0.07363620817753341
mentalhealth,Perseverance4Life,2020/03/20,"Instant Natural Mood Booster I discovered by Accident! Smells really affect my mood.  i have been struggling for a few days because the Air BnB Guests upstairs keep cooking curry, and the smell permeates EVERYTHING in my house, and opening the doors & windows is only so effective.

This morning, it had me pretty hateful, I just got the house cleared out, and then they cooked lunch.  Anyway, the smell had me about to downward spiral, so I took action.  I do not own air fresheners, so went to my cupboard.

I am now simmering a simple pot of water that I put dried rosemary & some lemon juice in.  Now, not only does my house smell amazingly fresh like a spa, but it also considerably boosted my mood.  Very uplifting.  I am going to do this the next time I am in a funk!  I encourage all to try it ;0",4.332083333333333,6.117743480263162,5.264473684210525,79.87964912280704,71.4342105263158,8.487719298245612,30.429824561403517,9.075114841892004,2.770695614035088,627,27,113,13,12,205,103,152,0.04,0.83,0.13,0.917,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,1,9,8,1,1,10,0,10,4,0,2,2,16,16,9,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,6,5,4,1,2,3,0,5,2,2,0,0,6,4,18,3,12,10,4,19,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,7,75,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387597375269377,0.0,0.3760064663271935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577302274583196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190270329815516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184398681369848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15594393041224922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861246990580086,0.0,0.13877565109642828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17130996021413486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6006384114117767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542279430533744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477057566256598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845349777734774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26393167642972765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765269499417813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744303175330532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115803572113876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18139536222151287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117788593568937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927813475994581,0.11780517183223375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316789706161628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16084997495972111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,XxItsukiMinamixX,2020/03/20,A moment of silence please.... For the user known as corsac370  he made a post saying he was gonna commit suicide this Saturday I chose not to comment on his thread instead I chose to direct message him we talked for awhile I tried to get him to stop it’s not worth it theirs so much you can live for I even told him this morning I realized  he defeated his account if anybody is suffering from mentle issues please see a psychiatrist or talk to a trusted froend or loved one commuting suicide is not the way take care of yourselves and each other,3.1561682242990656,5.448000551401873,4.022252336448599,85.28291121495327,76.19626168224299,6.522990654205607,27.522429906542047,7.554174236665415,1.705535327102803,437,18,81,6,10,140,78,107,0.161,0.716,0.124,-0.6559999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,3,4.0,1,1,1,1,3,5,0,0,6,0,4,1,0,1,1,14,12,6,2,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,3,2,0,1,3,2,13,3,13,8,2,6,0,2,1,1,18,1,0,3,3,54,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082476863527709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490597527549109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671280919776688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21318516141108207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18035753028414894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18434466065551072,0.19326740112636026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15014811565261466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840588278232205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4484129110972997,0.0,0.0,0.19561616617410507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242873303603372,0.0,0.0,0.16276174262168205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17076312872889224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4468352700301987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153571464827211,0.3283387164179041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19517075146629656,0.0,0.1386731409671576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16212507623833608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angrychameleons,2020/03/20,"what is wrong with me? i had a complete meltdown last night on my
boyfriend. i feel horrible. he was being rude to me and wouldn’t own up to it. we started arguing. at this point it felt like someone else was controlling me and i was just watching as if i was in the background not being able to control myself much except to go even more crazy. i was screaming bloody murder at him. as if i was seriously insane. screaming telling him to stop “abusing” me because it felt like emotional abuse at the time. i cut myself for the first time. when he tried to talk to me i would start to calm down and then he was get a sarcastic tone or say something sarcastic and it would throw me in a fit of rage all over again. i would scream bloody murder “STOP DISRESPECTING ME, YOURE SO FUCKING RUDE!!” and then just scream bloody murder over and over until my voice was gone and i was also crying. then i finally started to “come back to reality” almost. i suddenly feel bad for everything. and i apologize and start crying and he forgives me. this has happened several times. i don’t know what is wrong with me.. things just set me off. especially if he doesn’t take my feelings into consideration. but he finally apologized for hurting my feelings last night but denied that he emotionally abuses me which i agree cause i was just being crazy. when i get into this fit of rage... it happens so fast. i started throwing stuff and freaking out if he got an attitude and stuff. he said he thinks i enter a state psychosis. but idk cause that says it has hallucinations and stuff and i don’t have those. 
i am truly a nice girl, and i love him so much and i’d give him the world.. i don’t want to put him through this.. so i want to figure out what the fucj is wrong with me ...",2.191945812807884,4.506322086206897,3.3767947454844,88.56196551724138,79.57471264367815,6.390935960591134,23.735960591133004,7.554174236665415,1.1036526108374385,1378,48,281,21,35,445,169,348,0.22699999999999998,0.677,0.096,-0.9911,0,0,1,0,2,1,39.0,1,1,0,3,14,27,10,0,11,0,29,2,0,4,1,64,57,37,3,10,14,0,6,2,0,4,0,8,0,1,21,25,0,4,11,0,0,7,6,21,0,1,16,15,49,6,41,34,5,56,0,1,1,2,29,20,1,6,29,199,70,0,0.08778701099135383,0.3120397589594574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790601070037597,0.0,0.0,0.07020324097321218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750279268355121,0.07329848731188167,0.05351414709075205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803628846664615,0.0,0.07562073677587254,0.0920430108066564,0.0,0.1969211950157221,0.0,0.0,0.1928598188270726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733347831000629,0.19749714311325045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057982492820770073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889730493988321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17755100184710498,0.0,0.16857859478679654,0.19233275909166167,0.0,0.07467158670323022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115767708045736,0.0917301799354447,0.0842133001820224,0.04989138139884857,0.0,0.07021129218585931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525952779719635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397781092039167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048245445412172204,0.14311626146846051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577659855434247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923120485343928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906710796317905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476432592034046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298710065640054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825019298144457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350555047601599,0.13962350930588646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991743348410013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438164953335583,0.06758272994645594,0.0,0.0,0.3106804910847307,0.0,0.0,0.14678774406183084,0.0,0.0,0.3014853741802045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600490703718011,0.07055987412197555,0.0767297169755806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05832178932866156,0.05625037195911607,0.0,0.0,0.15356793622050025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059601617972385126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355810713145354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18708412162759575,0.2879439464495556,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,denierdinosaur,2020/03/20,"Artistic mentally ill people Some days (to some of us) we feel a bit better, even if it's tiny. In those days, I feel like I want to do so many things (I am a very crafty person, and I like drawing, writing, planning, embroidering, and more) and I have new ideas for art and ways to make art but it overwhelms me. I start feeling bad because it paralyse me, I just have those ideas in my head, all the time but when I feel an impulse of energy, I want to take them out but I don't know where to start and frustrates me. And I research and look for materials but my energy time goes away before I can put my mind in only one thing.
Have you feel the same? How do you cope with it?",1.2794257854821254,3.0223500845070426,2.796760563380285,94.46638678223188,79.84507042253522,5.777681473456122,20.782231852654384,6.67199483983844,0.125000433369447,520,14,121,5,13,170,87,142,0.08900000000000001,0.8029999999999999,0.10800000000000001,-0.4515,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,2,2,1,2,6,6,1,1,5,0,8,2,1,2,1,34,21,15,0,3,6,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,8,10,0,0,8,3,0,1,1,3,0,1,0,6,23,3,15,21,6,16,0,1,1,0,7,6,0,3,10,83,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149792528245145,0.0,0.13311987462299474,0.09718886176962956,0.0,0.13566571894967874,0.0,0.0,0.14100551022307764,0.17405951594478955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20564215865563573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053039763533895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4030705129784173,0.11389894921145267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636242287862916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35996084510132736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762019353921684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557817966495753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13388354479709547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106422748844078,0.16164001267670128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067093978557656,0.0,0.16098185553927782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398136076535068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803591003227776,0.12125596182872725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053075039610596,0.13921072417210195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16027417557961895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256949606342324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987375553748353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21184036855182495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859332997219189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19177823848620976,0.0,0.0,0.13154890156448973,0.1880753988670528,0.1265504745777916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mentalhelp_,2020/03/20,"Share how you feel during self isolation periods, m the two of us are auditing what mental health support is needed and how to provide that during this period Hi everyone!  
We are a team of two students at Cornell Tech, NYC who is researching any mental health related or general health related issues that might come up during the isolation period. We plan to get in touch with the one's seeking support and how we can provide for them during this period by connecting them to either resources or people. Please share your stories/feelings/daily happenings in this thread especially regarding isolation mental health.

​

If any experienced redditor can help us create a subreddit for this called isolation mental health or Covid-Mental health that would be of great help.",12.23218905472637,10.957262865671648,11.084179104477618,55.37263681592043,54.67164179104478,15.201990049751243,43.975124378109456,13.816669648895859,6.575476616915424,640,29,87,21,6,204,84,134,0.073,0.7659999999999999,0.161,0.9041,0,4,0,0,0,0,14.0,5,2,2,2,3,5,0,0,5,0,9,6,0,3,0,20,16,9,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,9,7,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,3,9,5,14,13,1,9,0,0,0,0,18,4,0,5,4,59,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346924471694228,0.12725205844409565,0.14243286975104924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693569926660763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902111165296616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000690057711883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052951990421157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0547143700541375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154594288144828,0.0,0.0,0.09260776839536096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6679052011868318,0.0,0.0,0.1403896118723051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930545169961728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4221517471777798,0.111096431623646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776520901123526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07096421456010192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260296955202092,0.0,0.0,0.11495634937958385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925077490263636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23768085627024824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20460176668795094,0.0,0.25194200816798273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439347202261593,0.0,0.12725205844409565,0.0
mentalhealth,liftingaddict98,2020/03/20,"Covid thoughts/observations by a contamination fear driven OCD person As someone with OCD and contamination fears for half a decade, it's very interesting and fascinating watching alot of everyday people turn into that aswell, even going beyond the fears you have.",24.16767441860465,13.594078325581396,20.389302325581397,25.469069767441848,44.8139534883721,22.781395348837208,63.930232558139544,17.122413403193686,9.523902325581396,220,9,29,6,1,70,38,43,0.17800000000000002,0.6859999999999999,0.136,-0.2601,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,2,4,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,1,1,1,1,1,7,3,1,5,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,1,19,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16522406369401227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8444768879492571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216802998633365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342497763148673,0.2184244351828847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21195429520689002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27209523422574816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064028809133284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheOrionNebula,2020/03/20,"Titrating off a low dose of Zoloft I am sitting at 50mg of Zoloft and can no longer afford to go to a doctor. I don't think it does anything and never has but it's one of those things where I just took it anyhow (anxiety). My doctor won't fill it anymore as he has been telling me that I have to come in to see him and I haven't several times now. The problem is with insurance deductibles I have to pay a lot of $$$ and considering I think this med is a waste I can't justify it. 

Anyhow I am on 50mg as mentioned, I can break them in half obviously. Has anyone gone from 50mg to 25mg and avoided massive withdrawals? I have missed the entire dose several days before when I ran out and felt shitty. But that was due to issues with refills. I was curious if titrating down to 25mg maybe for a week or so then stopping would make it not so horrible.

I don't have much choice but was curious if its fairly doable for most.",2.8400649350649374,3.5775311161616163,4.5267243867243865,87.79818181818182,73.69696969696969,7.6773448773448765,26.26406926406927,7.957251820313856,1.3471099567099567,723,24,163,10,14,245,118,198,0.132,0.8109999999999999,0.057,-0.907,1,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,1,7,0,23,6,0,1,2,32,34,18,0,4,8,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,12,10,0,2,3,0,1,6,8,4,0,2,8,2,18,0,26,24,3,26,0,2,1,0,5,9,0,7,9,113,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400472044010614,0.0,0.1815551528075192,0.12800602868604347,0.0,0.15065010297304632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15577814688214586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576976439241851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806429304407197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3747575448128237,0.1602048246179255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17577484925014464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404227245285992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910763646898309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15563862882094154,0.0,0.0,0.12219990967050234,0.0,0.1839173122200732,0.0,0.20334827358956944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13457670277814426,0.0,0.14119401847766402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12405222182765953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17517220953091645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14588220814657615,0.0,0.0,0.4136314881069518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15305379438515745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16001028424096564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216228399603091,0.23460631318900024,0.0,0.0,0.10674894549118416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033962794962145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468468258703568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300468912547924,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sturmtrupp13,2020/03/20,"Where can I get checked for Borderline Personality Disorder? The title is self explanatory, i have been battling with some of these symptoms my entire life. Now 31M i am ready to give it some further understanding.

I do not know where to begin and i do not know what is a better avenue for diagnosis if there even is one. Any info or general direction is greatly appreciated.

Thank you",3.2837500000000013,6.146080986111113,5.456111111111113,71.97500000000005,79.41666666666667,8.6,28.44444444444445,9.188382445141503,3.1634111111111105,309,14,53,9,8,107,58,72,0.064,0.7809999999999999,0.156,0.7889,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,1,5,4,1,0,2,0,10,2,0,0,0,13,17,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,4,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,7,3,6,16,2,5,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,4,2,41,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928700971261188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508372439856589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32505102104949835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18732714180762672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817880008990225,0.2720724145829581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.312690059373201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117382835620576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003279175140945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19218702787647465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476444667256894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958756304412661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947878983051567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611175270844444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29525654155788816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,barktwice,2020/03/20,"Need to help my brother in another state. Hi all,

​

I have an older brother (38) in another state that I believe needs mental health intervention. Our oldest brother died 10 years ago and the brother I'm concerned about has never really dealt with it. I think the covid pandemic has triggered PTSD (he's never been diagnosed and I don't think he's ever really been to therapy. He has been posting, deleting, and reposting conspiracy theories on Facebook. It is not political; it is paranoid. I don't think he will immediately harm himself but he also has an issue with alcohol and I think it is exacerbating whatever he is experiencing mentally. 

​

HOW DO I HELP HIM WITHOUT CALLING 911? FROM ANOTHER STATE?

​

He lives with his girlfriend but I think she's in denial along with my parents. I don't want this to be a stress and burden on my parents. I thought I got them to understand the severity of the issue yesterday but today they are content to just talk to him everyday even though they admit they think he needs the help of a mental health professional even though he says he does not. Please help me understand how I can help him.",4.98,7.212943666666671,6.079814814814818,72.84666666666669,70.66666666666666,9.42962962962963,32.83333333333333,9.861636050157227,3.7114,936,45,156,25,18,311,117,216,0.091,0.8220000000000001,0.08800000000000001,0.4825,2,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,1,0,4,0,10,3,0,1,9,0,20,4,0,3,4,38,36,13,1,4,7,6,0,0,1,1,4,1,0,0,6,10,1,0,10,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,5,2,27,0,21,29,1,19,0,0,0,0,38,5,0,0,10,105,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579331327420531,0.09137677950486556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837677480036643,0.0,0.27792762435729873,0.3116867692754013,0.0,0.26897227454548844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633268099437033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730819506875945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678381700224981,0.08873868826143133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482431342257673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294794368489268,0.07734242265126193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06838461654593844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817715318413729,0.0,0.0,0.2865545300362134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17848598296956353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550077797547812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585009543865523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901983307031095,0.131890478544099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18988208295941064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385669561109107,0.0,0.0,0.08188830656228692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999485141518242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955091312823888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799547371529731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659413248437956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794347867802544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872412948316013,0.0,0.0,0.0977802130877203,0.0,0.0,0.3287214917060266,0.16801266581008914,0.06787988740272269,0.0,0.0,0.08104691347476163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780234241908387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050431926446113384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242190903447529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3116867692754013,0.055061174245177175
mentalhealth,Thetwindler,2020/03/20,"Does anyone have advice for dealing with my family's anxiety? I am the older brother in my house. My dad is short-tempered, my Mom is quick to be anxious and my younger brother is quick to be nervous. Everyday it feels like a daily battle to maintain my own positivity. I often dread coming home, and I picked up extra hours at work and stayed longer at school so I can avoid my family for the sake of not having to deal with their anxiety that they put on me. My mom worries about the worst of the worst and she tells me every time. I told her I was considering join the military and she says she doesn't want me to join because she doesn't want to die. Why is the first thing that come to her mind? She also told me not to bike to work because she doesn't want me to be hit by a car. My dad told me to never leave my laptop in my car, and if I do, he acts like it is a 100% guarantee that someone will break in and steal it. One summer I went away from for a month on a archaeological dig in Europe, and I flourished. My confidence was greater than ever, and I felt more alive. When I would tell people at one-month trip that I was going to do this or that, they would say: ""Go for it"", they wouldn't list off all the what-ifs that could happen. I came home back to my anxiety-filled house and my confidence shrunk. My confidence recently has increased, I'm eating healthier, I'm exercising more, but I am still fighting as hard as ever to maintain a positive and confident attitude around my family. 

Has anyone ever gone through something like this? I don't know if I should confront them on this issue or not. It gets exhausting and infuriating to listen to their anxiety and negative talk every day. All I know is that they aren't changing in there ways, and unless I do something about it, this will continue as it has the past 20 years of my life. Its hard to stop them from getting under my skin because they are the people closest to me.",5.046202290076337,5.223516371501277,5.959099872773539,81.50445133587787,68.49109414758269,9.196310432569977,28.588740458015266,9.075114841892004,2.0978618320610685,1526,48,316,26,24,505,193,393,0.11699999999999999,0.7829999999999999,0.1,-0.6064,0,1,2,0,2,1,41.0,0,0,9,3,15,13,3,3,15,0,36,5,1,1,6,52,60,26,1,10,9,6,5,3,0,6,3,3,2,0,20,20,1,2,4,2,0,13,11,10,0,2,10,8,60,3,54,39,10,55,0,0,0,0,36,17,0,5,25,232,80,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853945623733607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07245784871080659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20794078146889627,0.1023593619081793,0.0,0.12670810413075315,0.0,0.0,0.08065884262831409,0.0,0.0,0.08512762884343235,0.06967067434519185,0.0,0.1656983318734157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036295027814487,0.0,0.0,0.09584948230288932,0.15609865951335986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234178114684797,0.0,0.0,0.058433586647091584,0.18682229374990428,0.0,0.0,0.09403506479524333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929020925148966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271289464694583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24587583616311626,0.15267948030769726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25624675018489584,0.0,0.04581328244944783,0.06472917967084088,0.08699628498350209,0.0,0.0,0.07706969731501516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467613471739413,0.0,0.10298732979437013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012287766267914,0.0,0.16233094809866422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177107151394115,0.0,0.08922898298805193,0.2090950776722962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456946740151694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958973791522097,0.0,0.0,0.09593902008143082,0.0,0.0,0.06399792984796851,0.13279702720597406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148656351168072,0.2122340753299271,0.14464221503479474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988118676733049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279438712642565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649399352302255,0.12563004050651955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108438646285502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946281923714759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144107579272845,0.0,0.0916984423721302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677044868633126,0.13950635765639754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657429135114456,0.07235833152483945,0.07575094827809406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282593528886379,0.15838785067945965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0601948190587409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05283327918218508,0.0,0.0,0.25973469114387465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160325881439823,0.07191908672632764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399297489666929,0.08175811917279001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13192497351974591,0.0920151254190929,0.0,0.12872827325506714,0.0,0.0,0.058347505347313165
mentalhealth,mattimeomeg,2020/03/20,Waking up with anxiety I've had a rough week at work (got a write up) and this morning I had just woken up after some super disturbing dreams when my boss called. She wanted to know where I'd put a mechanical cat one of my residents likes. When I told her she told me we can't do that and sounded super disappointed in me. I told her I'd forgotten to find new batteries for it and had moved it to a cupboard because the resident was upset because it wasn't moving (no/low batteries). She still was understandably not happy with me forgetting. That doesn't change the fact that now I'm nauseated and tense and can't stop the worst case scenarios from running through my head on a loop.,5.9037408759124075,5.905038379562043,6.764662408759122,77.0648038321168,66.66423357664233,10.645620437956207,31.723540145985407,10.411451182825502,3.116183211678832,546,20,109,13,8,182,90,137,0.125,0.746,0.129,0.3578,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,3,6,8,0,2,8,0,10,2,2,1,1,20,19,7,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,1,3,1,0,4,5,4,0,1,11,2,15,4,16,8,2,19,0,1,0,0,11,7,0,1,9,71,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14583676180960473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23242105744694186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194661662937878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20166863885145986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17423873875905008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246980155434162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029366016101908,0.0,0.0,0.19564853207455765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476909424231083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313559509036518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4052338631232977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184118375524516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918054597379394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19164281117907084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15224293212209838,0.1593810447788935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5464853890390867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19845981106121788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244262533923284,0.0,0.15291747992071608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13878598611606716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eyeofprovibex,2020/03/20,"Is it really helpful to see a therapist ? I always thought it wasn’t, or that it would be useless for me personally. But as time passes, I really start to question whether seeing one would help me or not. 
I feel like I have a lot of issues that need to be diagnosed so that I can move forward with it, but at the same time I still hesitate and I don’t know what to expect. 

I’ve never seen any therapist before, and I’m scared of opening up to someone I don’t know. I’m also not sure it will really help and I don’t want to pay a lot of money to see someone who doesn’t help at all. I’ve rarely heard great things about therapists, so I was wondering if any of you would share your opinion on this, and possibly your experience, if that helped or not, and you think this is a good thing to do or if it’s not really necessary.",5.625022222222222,4.315416137142858,6.962476190476192,79.77774603174605,67.62857142857143,10.977777777777774,30.87301587301588,10.25414643259724,2.715653968253968,644,20,144,14,9,222,96,175,0.106,0.785,0.109,0.1674,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,4,0,0,5,7,0,1,5,0,17,1,0,0,3,41,33,19,0,9,14,0,1,1,0,4,1,1,0,1,16,7,0,0,7,0,2,3,10,2,0,1,5,6,16,5,20,22,4,13,0,1,4,0,14,6,0,12,7,103,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943727196871734,0.0981939456010672,0.0,0.0,0.16050197463952154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004179940659789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977787573701686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11543662656657885,0.0,0.0,0.05966950633335899,0.08430651526845406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09898136244994847,0.0,0.13010666953397707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3954987701182471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317199581330615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971064677207955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057653826083164786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006561153561864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542617376767334,0.0,0.08750307298942032,0.09101674652972012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996677020934025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304196065197546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303877673024808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13219843944371712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024014410246728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181488039851296,0.0,0.2821165677958216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19997933041181007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352823171967334,0.0,0.09424310353568073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122322325089803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110568369530736,0.15680147525007693,0.07561617543016985,0.0,0.09368692227671012,0.13762540111602556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960547746919615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797703522179665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514931949512004,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aalandrum,2020/03/20,"I anyone else had this experience on Prozac? I’ve been on antidepressants (Prozac) for a few months now. Started at 20mg, and he prescribed 20mg vyvanse because he suspected I also had ADHD innatentive type. well the Prozac didn’t do anything and the vyvanse made me feel so euphoric it was insane. I was talking super fast, mind racing, happy and laughing asking questions. BUT it did take care of my anxiety. that was gone. 8 was happy and racing around and numbing into things literally dancing. my boss literally told me that I was freaking her out. so I stopped taking the vyvanse and Prozac was upped to 40. that didn’t do anything so I went to 60. this is when things starting getting bad. I felt like my depression was worse. I’ve been suffering from intrusive thoughts/suicidal ideation since my junior year of high school (in 21 now) but this time it was really bad. the thought of suicide wouldn’t get out of my head. I could barely get out of bed, I couldn’t stop feriously tapping or shaking and it was driving the people around me insane. The paranoia also got worse on the meds: sometimes when I go outside I get paranoid people are following me. there was even one time I saw a man on the roof of the building next to mine and I was terrified he was CIA and because I saw him, he was going to send a sniper. that’s the worst of paranoia. then came the feelings of buzzing and whirring (I don’t really know how to explain it) in my head. it was like a bunch of energy and it made me want to scream. these were my lowest points. the only thing that helped was sitting down in the shower for an hour or two. some days I could barely get out of bed and others I was painting my dining room table and reorganizing my closets. I’ve also been battling anxiety since I can remember. so I told my doc that my depression was worse, my anxiety was worse so he upped me to 80mg and .5mg klonopin twice a day. two days after I impulsively decided to get two tattoos (didn’t have any before), my ears pierced again, and I cut off all of my hair. I feel better sometimes but other times I still feel that suicidal ideation. there’s also this sense of apathy and “I don’t care”. I am calmer (probably due to the klonopin). I’m all of a sudden wanting to go out (which I NEVER do because of my anxiety) drink more (never drank in high school) and am craving sex all of the time (I haven’t been intimate with someone in years and didn’t miss it all). now, a few days ago, I think I started hearing voices but I’m not sure. it’s either an incomprehensible voice or laughter (usually when I’m alone). I know they aren’t real, I know they are in my head but (and I don’t know how to really explain it) but I know they aren’t coming from me. I mean I’m going from happy in the mornings to severely depressed to excessive talking throughout one day, dancing and jumping, my little brother asking if I’m drunk and my mom asking if I’m on drugs (which has happened in the past before the drugs, where Id be incessantly talking jumping from one thing to another and not letting my mother get a word in edgewise. But now by mom wants me off the meds, cause she says that I have been WAY moodier on them. Any advice?",3.0539436619718323,4.8778056228482045,4.3336071987480445,85.0692370892019,74.93114241001565,7.04945226917058,27.1697965571205,7.857877913537022,1.6595270735524257,2519,98,499,37,54,829,276,639,0.19,0.735,0.075,-0.9978,4,1,3,0,0,1,76.0,0,0,4,2,27,26,2,1,29,0,55,17,5,6,7,93,116,49,2,9,15,4,6,2,0,1,7,6,5,1,31,33,4,2,19,4,0,16,16,14,1,7,44,14,70,12,67,66,11,91,0,5,2,1,32,35,0,7,40,334,101,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197407482219828,0.058522134354305866,0.05308734700309526,0.0,0.0,0.062026196994490274,0.0,0.19157054436436294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145216847403025,0.06279808361347762,0.18325748192597724,0.0,0.0,0.041875278033345294,0.06136262040129376,0.09856590369225683,0.1066265329776557,0.1679623731733253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000842497271273,0.10952201936035014,0.0,0.1019210310509444,0.0,0.0,0.05296631712515089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849623820355555,0.12212018615017065,0.061521760818466185,0.0,0.05158845057778697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563183727618983,0.0,0.0,0.1931149316864133,0.0,0.1547450641119417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05866771495353852,0.13890278367418862,0.0,0.05002897346534972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03955564429538278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05858222975943024,0.0,0.0,0.12112525577439735,0.0,0.05750214079113675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190240824869043,0.0,0.136143559202836,0.0,0.047898128626649716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052959008454488775,0.19125656388125534,0.0,0.0,0.18438795996430246,0.0,0.06749844440658315,0.0,0.04014185187103722,0.1265505123900012,0.0,0.0,0.05897789248589086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456516309976452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061239824126359386,0.0,0.05851677732744905,0.06002379004153716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333547765005828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652358940598392,0.13304475705670268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06047009083828776,0.1402808600690539,0.0478022539402109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237906747187632,0.0,0.06369186547983313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174554588585207,0.04554773581099688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571701400133546,0.08303798579642861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566137824535518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456969529288607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067088579973907,0.0,0.0,0.06816597415499344,0.11509789759495916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784174701802373,0.0,0.0,0.04762556420649732,0.0,0.1212202738222698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765671017850063,0.0,0.09908040860767453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05074314552394181,0.0,0.11846208104341167,0.0,0.1271676990451191,0.0,0.047826857980684014,0.10013856784287102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19652417504694009,0.0,0.056443995401325574,0.0,0.0900570671420756,0.14440779344844218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914844920419882,0.03837399181120992,0.0,0.04754460494479757,0.13968535132586732,0.0,0.0,0.11445163649865295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17550644313506622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595847975968085,0.0,0.10597097805686878,0.04753652930457341,0.0,0.0,0.053846756251792735,0.05551703580090354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24412509595689455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713217795286467
mentalhealth,londonmassacre,2020/03/20,"I am a Vet with PTSD and I made a YouTube Channel to help others stay positive. https://youtu.be/IYkPQCXKpCE

Here is my YouTube channel  (Mind Strength) that I created, I was extremely depressed and in a dark place and I was able to pull myself out of it. So my channel is me giving tips and stories about how if you are experiencing any mental health issues these are some of my tips and lessons that I learned. I want to use the channel to help out people because I know I would have loved the help when I was in that situation",5.296008403361345,6.43749316666667,5.132072829131655,84.22147058823529,68.31372549019608,8.181512605042016,32.21848739495798,8.418075326091056,2.3275193277310926,421,18,83,6,7,130,65,102,0.034,0.763,0.203,0.9404,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,2,5,3,0,0,5,0,10,2,0,3,0,19,16,9,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,3,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,16,2,12,11,1,8,0,1,0,1,6,5,0,2,1,60,22,1,0.21956787053123786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14931368126434588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338465359205489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891134851526028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106295086547109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333903789181939,0.0,0.0,0.44151514597504987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291718113109461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206687594480811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981685756564526,0.20776042802566616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22127277058119305,0.0,0.22170095747255392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15222071525320233,0.0,0.2294016920661114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25666309079203425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468034860102593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23403013555152816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18963614282852195,0.0,0.0,0.1295068188466886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15597471551542727,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Multipass_Ldn,2020/03/20,"Feel terrible during COVID19 lockdown? Don't despair! I've personally been confined at home for nearly 2 weeks already, self-isolating like many others in London. I have clinical anxiety so you can imagine how hard it is to cope with the current situation, away from my family living in France! 

But I see more and more 'smaller' politicians stepping up and companies trying to help out! [These guys](https://twitter.com/iamYiam/status/1240977583820476416) called SYD give their app for free to manage your health/know what to do during the pandemic..check it out if helpful! In France[DIOR is starting](https://www.ft.com/content/e9c2bae4-6909-11ea-800d-da70cff6e4d3) to produce hand gel for hospitals for free - same with [Brewdog](https://www.campaignlive.co.uk/article/brewdog-punk-sanitiser-uncommon-creative-studio/1677794)in the UK! It's heartwarming and I'm focusing on the positives to get through this!!",10.224999999999998,13.96556954347826,6.937028985507247,65.81032608695656,60.08695652173913,10.107246376811597,41.21014492753624,10.317481424215053,5.3853362318840565,759,41,92,19,12,211,111,138,0.046,0.752,0.20199999999999999,0.9692,1,1,0,0,0,0,60.0,0,2,1,1,2,6,0,0,4,0,7,2,1,2,0,15,12,7,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,7,7,0,1,2,0,3,1,1,2,0,0,1,4,6,6,24,11,3,13,0,1,1,0,8,10,0,1,3,58,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26007854157760474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802944169786197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214289487037643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406554464867572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221779590366807,0.0,0.11916679822138022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231329784620562,0.2260855584242645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111228262077084,0.0,0.0,0.250516627444976,0.0,0.0,0.3159424304413016,0.0,0.2364060753067364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952346534172332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514125525288706,0.0,0.2081095986405023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389423457549871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057865279586624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18780630272360693,0.0,0.2458654517951817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649139919286264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16001112713966512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18904813536753626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,joyful_heart,2020/03/20,"Really just need a place to vent I was treated for anxiety in college and have since graduated and removed myself from many of the things in my life that were not good for me. With all the panic currently going on across the world I find a lot of my hold habits returning. I haven’t been sleeping, I catch myself chewing on my lip or the inside of my cheek constantly to the point it’s becoming uncomfortable. Work has had talks of going to a smaller crew and those able to work from home have been encouraged to do so. My job is not one where I can work from home so I’ve been able to continue working as normal. I’m worried that if I do have to change my routine this will be too overwhelming. I’m trying to cope and really just needed a place to write out all of my feelings. I know I can’t control everything going on around me and need to refocus on the things I can control.",5.8343333333333325,5.356213766666674,6.638888888888893,79.52500000000002,66.8888888888889,10.311111111111114,31.333333333333336,9.888512548439397,2.752933333333333,698,24,144,14,10,232,104,180,0.07200000000000001,0.9129999999999999,0.015,-0.8274,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,6,7,5,0,2,10,0,19,5,3,2,2,28,29,10,0,5,6,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,7,8,1,3,3,0,0,5,4,2,0,1,6,1,20,3,31,21,3,23,0,1,0,0,3,14,0,3,4,106,27,7,0.2679765694782971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250067108338584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927798058383368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14797953356949062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14174183904147974,0.0,0.0,0.1447937355928118,0.3005585091801184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042003070907235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774850266161257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246286484913685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284458899354749,0.112383016208086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26880234866067393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296269787210407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363645719626846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463988801559986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391204821881902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584309043262807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29805184612406216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131280070637842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907939293833114,0.0,0.0,0.1572063827526952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799784791994296,0.0,0.12666223791947215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17167265234002674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083649373295362,0.0,0.13408504947596478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769470788730788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17803172535023395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096925011587906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39018026833147795,0.13607160709872174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hoozuki_Suigetsu,2020/03/20,"Shortness of breath, my hypocondria again? Or covid? The thing is I have never expirienced shortness of  breath in my anxiety attacks before but then again I thought I was going to die of spinal cord, brain and testicle cáncer before with symptoms that went away after I was Very VERY reassured I was not

Soooo is my hypocondria or not who knows, but at this point no one takes me seriously",8.045416666666668,8.116477152777783,6.835555555555558,78.11500000000002,62.194444444444436,9.977777777777778,34.66666666666667,9.516144504307137,3.096683333333334,313,12,56,5,4,94,52,72,0.172,0.759,0.069,-0.7471,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,6,5,4,0,1,11,11,6,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,5,0,9,1,9,6,0,13,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,2,5,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863394921136484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771095837961684,0.22885321981773565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4145405243405827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719179655438847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527995628039995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843321107428555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386624584963472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18786538299806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16505740410738629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23026363471017475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531748671809153,0.1831432798937779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618249955402307,0.0,0.0,0.19337682576553586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4019611664107898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258028680973416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HappyBeeNoises,2020/03/20,"A poem I wrote An introvert with countless scars,
I recharge in the light of stars,
And crave a quiet distance far,

I wonder, who will wait for me?

Wearying stress as social plight,
A hungry blade soon glistens bright,
Memories red from darkest nights,

I wonder, who still waits for me?

Shortly arises a lonely ache,
Cyclone mind then palms will quake,
Absent aid provokes my break,

I see now, no one waits for me.",8.149473684210527,7.708703947368424,6.880526315789478,79.57368421052634,62.15789473684211,8.65263157894737,33.473684210526315,7.1686216300943375,2.2357473684210523,324,11,57,2,4,97,61,76,0.20199999999999999,0.7609999999999999,0.037000000000000005,-0.9013,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,6,0,2,1,1,1,0,10,9,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,5,9,1,8,6,0,9,0,1,3,0,4,3,0,2,5,34,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088578814168174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28705349391653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20727641744299455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437517122047506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118124776830392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24428112850434305,0.0,0.3503916287786451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6634411095085492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DeepFriedMadara,2020/03/20,"How to stay happy with yourself? Without needing anyone else? I have many friends. Or atleast so I think. And I'm there for them whenever they need me. Because that's how I like to treat my friends. 


Not all of them treat me the same way tbh. I find myself getting angry when I'm not included in certain activities or anything where I think I should be. 
Guess u can say I'm looking for validation or whatever.

 For example I have a friend who I helped a lot, emotionally and what not in many situations. And I thought of her as my best friend. There's a trend on insta where u draw something and you tag 10 friends and then they draw it. Its stupid but inclusive. Literally like many of my friends including this girl who I'm talking about also did, but none of them tagged me. Call me petty but I like having these small interactions and now I'm just…sad. That my own friends don't give me what I give them… idk what to do so now I wanna know how people who can be happy with themselves do it. 


Not every friend will be the same but like, I just. It hurts… I just wanna know how to stay happy with yourself, without the need of anyone else. Because it's not just friends who do this, right? I just wanna know how to become that person that doesn't get affected by all this because it hurts and it takes a toll on my mental health too... 😭

It hurts a lot you know 😭",1.263980815347722,3.5528030719424457,2.667884892086331,92.44012470023985,83.02877697841727,5.7210551558753,22.21630695443645,7.0316486544052195,0.6112571702637889,1066,36,231,14,30,345,131,278,0.061,0.736,0.203,0.991,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,5,1,21,23,1,0,8,0,16,1,0,6,3,57,38,25,0,7,18,0,0,4,9,2,1,1,0,2,23,10,0,0,8,0,0,0,10,3,0,0,2,2,34,20,28,31,9,15,0,2,1,0,30,8,0,6,8,158,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888382565601522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12045815752800955,0.1765153222085962,0.07088351236974452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15752517094202126,0.0951316842314299,0.0,0.0,0.09039559571176432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795563266937774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439130257679694,0.09689266895074916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257424067848338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872776936030497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5989439437858757,0.0,0.09000618254190215,0.1652611533951716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09488975149930796,0.0,0.0,0.27508370549717404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155973314875368,0.0,0.0,0.05773589744642393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18442314210092867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893548391440772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16832898818554315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07233348862025196,0.0,0.0,0.14646140232925198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26198856704714035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680595970325189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916087544413972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05971663499111422,0.07521161280858336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735606318771193,0.0,0.06849969701667774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682173457202414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06631256509604164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18362142312108973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647643961412765,0.06923375616210035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103863799278516,0.0,0.06838325356893019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837163840136656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660662243500937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WhatTheHellDan,2020/03/20,"Ever since I was young Ive always thought people were watching me It usually was people id seen recently like in movies, but as I grew older it became random and i even began creating random, strange characters I even felt like I knew where they were and Id look at them. Im 16 now and a few years ago I was diagnosed with depression and severe anxiety. I take lexapro for the anxiety but still feel as if im being watched 
Never told anyone this. Am I a schizophrenic or is my anxiety just insanely powerful?",3.692647058823528,5.282737823529415,5.578578431372549,77.77610294117648,72.72549019607844,9.805882352941175,29.41666666666667,10.125756701596842,3.258466666666667,406,17,76,12,8,140,72,102,0.16,0.731,0.109,-0.6486,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,1,7,3,0,0,3,0,9,2,0,0,2,18,18,10,0,1,5,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,11,6,13,2,6,6,1,15,0,1,4,0,3,3,0,4,13,50,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648902329996683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15477859192637386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4269007202216904,0.0,0.0,0.13006534968570968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16021362978438136,0.18880034646765587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457210530387733,0.16826035887344726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405429341581296,0.0,0.1786026601117861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4018541910725482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817541390295922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562049542255826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346550373709238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579174435859065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836664347205693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21014293113335555,0.0,0.15387274542151486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14855106162335116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985941681600528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14767437873223846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17774439743952447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20486819759977004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978695030360237
mentalhealth,Diagla0520,2020/03/20,"I’m alone I (21m) have always been alone. 
I was abandoned by my blood parents and was put into an orphanage before I was even 1. I got adopted at age 4 but the parents who adopted me used me solely for labor and eventually left me when I was 12. During the time they took care of me, I never once got emotional support and they have never shown any love towards me. I was sent back to an orphanage and then transferred to a foster home with foster parents who treated me like dirt and only provided the basic necessities. When I turned 18 I was released from them and had to live on my own. Overall, my home life never taught me anything and my “parents” showed no “parental affection” and I’m not even sure what it means to be loved. 
As for school, I was born with a cleft lip and my facial proportions are all out of wack, so I had no true friends. Everyone who hung out with me during grade school did it because they felt bad that I was deformed or that I was adopted and then abandoned again. I could never socially fit in, and everywhere I go I’m always the one who is left out. I have no online friends because I was unable to access internet except on school devices until I could afford my own phone. 

So my question is: How do I live my life with no one at all to support me or love me? Is my life even worth living if no one loves me?",3.8297963887821744,4.679799029197081,4.93494045332309,85.3669746446408,71.48175182481751,7.520245870149827,27.924702266615444,7.669130373188453,1.5572583941605838,1050,37,216,12,19,346,142,274,0.151,0.7070000000000001,0.142,0.6159,7,2,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,4,0,10,16,0,0,8,0,25,10,3,3,8,43,45,24,0,3,6,5,1,1,2,0,3,0,2,0,9,19,0,2,3,1,1,4,10,3,0,3,20,1,43,13,29,22,4,31,0,2,0,4,23,13,0,4,15,158,52,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18129141901536214,0.0,0.0,0.14564952622818106,0.0,0.0,0.05951751002018951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202260259680303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729850535999904,0.07307666016669134,0.1067043887119157,0.0,0.07447421106752615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923383550159956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975733095797174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844972345588852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342105187459408,0.0,0.0,0.0836303876220008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403420816991515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523753486968884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04974039243425756,0.0,0.13999761596986215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558207302493206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19018437627277607,0.0,0.18545672474316674,0.042758504115775316,0.0,0.2318488306504496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159656928272645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533639315251458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700074007564902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320736693132987,0.17792016794457505,0.06656392023233304,0.0,0.0,0.4859104333766993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798311668711024,0.09804392702228383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657287950842228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921698068850169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986363508563305,0.08248782383121006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051034395111664216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723942512302892,0.0,0.09519808167265843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559033395610043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pwnster1357,2020/03/20,"I'm here if someone needs to talk There's a lot going on in the world right now. Everyone is on edge, they are scared, and it's ok to feel worried. I'll admit, I've been having a rough time lately, but I know that mental health is just as important as physical health. If anyone needs to talk, my inbox is open. Whether you want advice, or just need to let it all out.",2.279615384615384,3.4073223461538475,3.7005128205128233,91.68615384615387,75.53846153846153,6.7384615384615385,20.69230769230769,7.1686216300943375,0.31552307692307746,285,6,65,3,6,94,60,78,0.048,0.863,0.09,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,1,0,5,2,0,1,3,1,7,2,0,0,1,19,16,8,0,6,7,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,1,10,14,2,11,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,4,3,40,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015155044693045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441936093204209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19705176102028613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427087669759312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171994080346949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4384037963743056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333295419251035,0.0,0.2326248042746984,0.0,0.0,0.21087361540372127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753206147377316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20782095454555527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4587278843920705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17611049731997194,0.0,0.0,0.20646189535196788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17472928288481168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315031673301783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024836563967993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216337222252176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094261158316859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,7thTimeIsTheCharm,2020/03/20,"Maybe there's a problem I might have mental illness, but it's not possible.

Even if I do, everyone (family, friends) said I don't.

They even brought me to a doctor to prove I was wrong.
I panicked and forgot why I thought I might have had a problem or something, and the doctor said I'm fine. My parents treated me like ""told you so"".

I have realized today that whenever I start thinking seriously about whether or not I have problems I get angry at myself: ""stop trying to attract attention!""
But...
I thought this, but are those words mine?
After all, it's what my best friend always tells me when I'm ""acting up"".

I don't know what's the point of this post, I hope it didn't annoy you (reader).

P.S.: this will probably sound ridiculous and just made up but I often catch myself thinking about whether I might have depression, or adhd, or ptsd, or whatever in thinking in that particular moment, and I tell myself ""shut up, there's no problem, it's all in your head"" then I remember that those problems I'm thinking about are in the head and I start losing myself in long circles of tangents",3.741043910521956,5.4399886995305184,4.6420104943385825,84.09792874896439,72.80281690140845,7.265285832642918,28.961336647334992,7.928766900206844,1.9388847832090588,855,35,163,12,17,277,116,213,0.18600000000000005,0.6779999999999999,0.136,-0.8887,1,0,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,3,1,2,11,19,2,0,6,0,17,5,2,1,3,47,37,20,0,7,15,1,0,1,2,4,3,3,0,0,14,5,0,2,11,0,0,3,6,11,0,0,11,3,33,8,18,22,3,24,0,2,0,0,12,11,0,11,10,120,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699140543854875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879235511894526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089117694029224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101097964695176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21630965427815232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958433990314265,0.0,0.0,0.10096951026887772,0.0,0.0,0.09961360479116173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16327638857159313,0.0,0.05520673565667634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168900050901084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049513432777456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05807191381032554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05162364235250613,0.0,0.0,0.09351212128607504,0.0,0.11821453586368184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998483223567016,0.0,0.0,0.10615687601956376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648765530146766,0.3362885103298111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173308886581714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09988963135308572,0.11912385864956007,0.10119994082558817,0.0,0.11392708241458994,0.5055460604762186,0.123519268408322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970030629095585,0.0,0.20102735454085024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134775075632142,0.0,0.0,0.1495835351642971,0.0,0.0,0.08834248651604447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847155300496984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708290263921489,0.0,0.16777586145777734,0.0,0.0,0.10016012288035016,0.10096951026887772,0.0,0.0717410730127709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534818645548296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553046370538707,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JoshZeKiller,2020/03/20,"Cant stand myself  

I cant stand myself. I've been going through a cycle for a while now... Its annoying and honestly horrible. Sometimes I'm happy, but most of the time, I'm not. I'm sorry in advance if I sound like I'm whining or anything like that, and also the fact that I am dumping stuff (not in any peticular order) out because I have so much wrong with me. But I need help, I dont want professional help, I just need someone anonymous to talk to...

I have a problem with communicating my thoughts with people, because they start dissapearing as I am telling people or writing it out, leading to the fact that my problem is never really resolved. Even now, I cant seem to put what I have been thinking for the last day into words.

Ive just going through a cycle of hating myself and being ignorant about myself. Whenever Im with anyone, I become super self consious. And I start analysing everything, my actions, my speech, what I say, how people react, how people respond. Then from this analysis, I start hating the conversation, I start seeing the wrongs I've done, the horrible things I've said, and how the things I say might effect how others think about me. This hits me with my already low self-esteem and makes me feel extremely worthless. Then after a while of this cycle, I start questioning the purpose of my existance, diving into a dark whole that I don't want to get out of, because I am so used to it.

I've always just felt that I am worthless, and that no one really cared about me. No one ever texts me, no one ever starts a conversation with me, no one ever truly cared about me. I've celebrated 18 birthdays alone (give or take, if youre nit picky its less, but for the last 9ish years, ive been alone) with my parents because no one ever remembers, no one ever cared. It just feels like that if I died one day, no one would know until I have to move out of my dorm and someone finds my dangling body after a month. I am an extroverted introvert, I love being around small groups of people, but also enjoy my silence, but hate being alone (its hard to describe with words, because I dont even know how to describe it to myself).

I literally cannot remember what I was going to say, thats how bad my problem with communicating my thoughts are. I hate myself so much

I also feel like I am not worth anything, with my always setting expectations so goddamn high, and that for the entirety of my life, my parents have always compared me with other people (my brother included) And that my classmates have always told me how fucking bad I am at something. Everyone seems to undermine my efforts 24/7, now to the point to where I get depressed after getting a half decent grade. And to the point that I just really wanna give up, and not care anymore, I just dont have any worth. No one ever cared, why should I? Ive tried picking up my shit for years, to the point where theres so much shit on me, I jsut want to drop it all and just die. I cant stand myself, I cant stop thinking, I cant get music out of my head. I just dont want to care about anything anymore, the people, the nature... nothing. The only reason why I havent died yet is because of fucking guilt, of the guilt of how my parents will react, the guilt of never getting the chance to explain why I died, the guilt of being never able to see my crush again, the guilt of never feeling loved by anyone ever. I wish this guilt would just go away...",6.58476505139501,5.8005148737151275,7.174284140969168,77.31916483113072,65.46108663729808,9.446255506607931,32.426211453744486,8.515128840125781,2.4571911894273124,2683,92,519,32,36,888,261,681,0.247,0.659,0.094,-0.9989,3,3,1,0,0,0,99.0,0,1,1,6,48,46,10,6,32,0,47,9,4,16,14,128,112,46,4,18,24,4,6,4,0,5,1,6,1,1,31,32,0,2,22,0,2,9,29,29,0,10,10,14,89,17,81,92,7,77,0,5,2,4,27,23,4,11,43,380,120,4,0.0470175027173458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460878592347882,0.0518849834128608,0.11279963980831675,0.15648931501777694,0.0,0.0,0.06394702829332675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325745743149212,0.06575146222271616,0.0,0.116074195756538,0.041855545707880346,0.0,0.0,0.04417449152449153,0.0,0.07851530169316645,0.1719685995348689,0.051927137773726685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222584618171544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876248654357609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06064479918347297,0.0,0.04049610619502831,0.0,0.19518697885700448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04811522940811885,0.220416652066564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210923422435567,0.2977101610746896,0.0,0.0449272387372376,0.0422562997362739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950938483671112,0.06717862667162619,0.04514417593768622,0.0,0.04297314568977318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693384726448196,0.12282352296976405,0.09020694577549446,0.10688452125217174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050051005929525084,0.04211844725603652,0.18568019947890269,0.04825352233785914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06302968197003081,0.04967657306090373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05078697117870792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051679179759059765,0.0766510801142603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03320985264200976,0.09188150752759286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487026377654124,0.0,0.03138454816072034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987814026876053,0.0,0.0,0.03752892209584418,0.04997216452108464,0.10368982320134604,0.06972576501659641,0.1450511865308703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045114561926353935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867424899742714,0.03575892950635734,0.0,0.0,0.1566221178639129,0.0,0.0,0.22817211429961345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13334021240344732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349682007441759,0.0,0.04726557655232193,0.052670363504421384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036184857808854,0.04834182354745107,0.0,0.0,0.10652333012873612,0.0,0.04472441198398056,0.11217061591562963,0.0,0.0,0.07493372457825362,0.08560593723993208,0.09809901894103057,0.0,0.0965255817593724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967555494968759,0.0361963706591639,0.04650151242188647,0.05263224491242497,0.19967538252657452,0.0,0.0,0.03930873757610867,0.0,0.0,0.05382379177239135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035351310643033804,0.037790887692853666,0.04109536975528022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06247267921015987,0.09038075177317292,0.0,0.07465329050310987,0.027416283939225333,0.0,0.0,0.0449272387372376,0.0,0.031921798035142404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040608026298084896,0.0,0.0,0.11092856513672296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12727794929303096,0.05249336269209425,0.054067807740433016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679976986469427,0.10281251658037543,0.0,0.060555460441183484
mentalhealth,ThrowAway_mrpickles,2020/03/20,"How to deal with mistrust issues in relationships that are becoming problematic. There are a lot of examples from past relationships that are influencing my current ones. I'm beginning to look at things and see reasons why I cannot trust people and seeing it everywhere.  From work to friends.

It starts out as venting or gossip and then goes into disrespect, judgement and probably even personal attacks.   There's hints or things being said as jokes or blanket statements with heavy aspects that can lead certain ways.  Or things not said but implied through looks, body language, or how they talk about things or other people that display thought patterns. 

Tldr Trying to sort weather I'm overreacting and allowing past issues to bleed into present ones or am I ignoring I'm picking up on and what my Gut says?",7.4913986013986,9.30904712587413,6.820566433566438,71.63238811188812,63.75524475524475,9.636083916083916,38.076223776223785,9.888512548439397,4.184561398601399,661,34,101,14,10,204,98,143,0.087,0.877,0.036000000000000004,-0.7544,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,2,6,7,1,0,1,0,7,3,2,7,1,33,19,19,0,0,9,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,12,11,0,1,3,1,0,1,2,3,0,2,3,7,5,4,21,15,1,16,0,0,4,0,11,7,0,9,7,70,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16628231058864276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16142632408501714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235492139159366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506883575450719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653974590571322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292571269844298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30511385832193505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454813928828765,0.0,0.0,0.12426315159537962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19808861287834695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790595824488967,0.2026630128799389,0.12762450578147108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575891908177608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502806279991022,0.0,0.3138502289399146,0.0,0.0,0.278070301309416,0.11623524149366884,0.0,0.0,0.2329470913913317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10345541975883524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174808461569721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884186725092752,0.0,0.0,0.11603765182745475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992355584367411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601794237083599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318900057036506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640891501674864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnAsianGuyWhoEatsDog,2020/03/20,"I really need help. I just can’t find a reason to keep on going, and I’m having a bit of nihilist thought in my head. In the greater scheme of things, what is the reason for life? It has no meaning, it’s all going to end with a death of the universe anyway, and I’m going to be forgotten, all my life’s deeds and art. I feel... that there is no reason to live, and I should kill myself. I feel that no matter the effort I put into things, it’ll all be for nought. I don’t really care about that though, I just feel like this life of just walking forward because I’m told to is useless. I don’t feel like there’s a point to keep going and I should just get it over with in the first place. This is truly, a cry for help. I need someone, or something to give me reason in life of which I have none.",2.413073217726396,2.913309300578036,3.878742774566476,92.93156310211948,74.49132947976878,6.4603082851637765,21.353082851637765,5.985473137389443,0.01101579961464294,611,12,146,3,12,203,86,173,0.132,0.747,0.12,-0.4679,0,0,1,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,0,2,9,5,1,0,10,0,15,5,1,4,3,34,36,7,2,4,5,0,4,2,0,3,4,0,0,0,13,8,0,2,11,1,0,7,7,2,0,1,2,4,16,3,25,29,6,18,0,1,0,0,4,10,0,1,5,101,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496765728787677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13426265007581684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253866252198426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508809902090882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892405474740748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487301654087876,0.17571432023091624,0.0,0.0,0.11240177802342437,0.10460699133663556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425213767019088,0.11797392223070605,0.27957018363646824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621328086668676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16486222285952998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186211054367388,0.13605949518555485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34745852787278386,0.1201639378244525,0.0,0.10859386940321747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339616136730067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823766874896024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284882519655183,0.0,0.11625614644989272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362918186479407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756867508193195,0.5057769760542585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042008200423552,0.09467625315251632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634053106514868,0.0,0.12082753302881916,0.09763263141620222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175129591909339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KappaSiren,2020/03/20,"Nightmare segments Should i be considered to have nightmare segments when you're **half** asleep (between awake and sleep) even if nothing particularly scary happened that day?  I dont get nearly as many full on nightmares as these, and each only last a few seconds before i become full awake again from fear.  
E.g.  Ill imagine a person turning around and scaring me by widening their eyes menacingly at me or they are a monster of sort, or even just ill  im playing a game and small scary parts from the relatively peaceful game will be more scary because now im actually in the game, with the thing tryong to blow me up?
I asked a freind if she also had these and she said they weren't normal so idk",2.9689978678038367,5.592740313432834,3.4652452025586378,87.26626865671642,78.70149253731344,5.321108742004265,25.989339019189767,6.5431188927421005,1.0388503198294248,558,22,104,5,14,174,97,134,0.10099999999999999,0.8,0.098,-0.1006,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,3,0,9,3,0,2,8,0,9,5,3,0,0,17,14,14,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,4,8,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,2,0,2,3,2,12,1,16,7,8,16,0,0,1,0,11,11,0,5,5,74,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.18879883516988086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547179084024747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17222933950778352,0.1808683560333195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179375309892434,0.21367244148998898,0.16462874079883064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12477216019172847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267454273974137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555702525646683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21770756502102886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010801024301007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17108490339857735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4179616513786301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577038917706875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19614823815250468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18955954607731826,0.18563970607354974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714267144833285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20950918262267604,0.0,0.0,0.16893056258852893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840342971427252,0.0,0.19369724527836926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19360974587327853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12853288728740314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21043982994360025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheGhostDogKillah,2020/03/20,I really don’t want to be sad anymore I’ve been aware of my sadness for a little over a year at this point. Looking back before when I was back in high school I think I really was sad the whole time actually. After high school graduation I had the loneliest summer of my life. And then college starts and I move to another city and fail to make a reliable group of friends. I have no one to talk to. I suck at socializing. I don’t have a support system. I’m so lonely. And the root cause is the fact that I just hate myself and I have no confidence and I feel like I’m not good enough and I feel like I’m treated like I’m not good enough by people. And I can’t stop replaying all the perceived bad shit that’s happened to me in my head.,0.4473119880863763,2.5255891518987355,2.672680565897249,92.45463514519732,84.69620253164557,5.996128071481758,20.0536113179449,7.285733465282438,0.4447992553983626,578,17,132,9,17,196,93,158,0.259,0.635,0.106,-0.978,0,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,5,17,3,0,9,0,12,3,2,3,2,22,27,11,0,1,3,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,4,0,0,1,7,9,0,1,4,3,19,8,17,22,4,21,0,5,1,0,4,9,2,0,13,83,22,5,0.0,0.0,0.14175928459973686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15232473691599308,0.0,0.0,0.14406547147639434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22340215707595,0.12129157568816196,0.0,0.0,0.12361121030857294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922885368543728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001985404035846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14690235480177655,0.20755703170857207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223264486301708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24368552915706754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845880902694512,0.0,0.0,0.14342073126650473,0.14908548093555246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30696435937503513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260612309846387,0.2129098261924288,0.14559533509101655,0.0,0.0,0.12198739033631315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696660947826656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15439544762872526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843643404736163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070959663616473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732392808569305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18612305728570896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940351879607197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911411729097085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14808104449717405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282047469520028,0.0,0.0,0.12144941472812674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16484686033374965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167598217436266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308099659596157,0.0,0.0,0.08470614534471338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08568202735079768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16218501455872106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935469526963884
mentalhealth,stupid_bitch_boy,2020/03/20,"is it normal to grow emotionally attached to something as soon as you see it? Context: I’ve recently started playing a video game and I’ve grown so attracted to the story and characters. Literally almost everything in my life right now is about this game. It’s honestly kinda scary.

I’ve had some (and am currently having) some other issues with mental health and I’m afraid this could be a symptom of something.

I’m just asking if I should be worried or if this is normal. This happens a lot for me but never to this extent. This is the first time I’ve ever felt so attached to something.",3.08779446640316,5.450932878260874,4.596837944664036,80.72624505928854,76.73913043478261,6.964426877470356,26.976284584980235,8.00094639256281,2.0018695652173912,471,19,83,8,11,157,75,115,0.033,0.914,0.053,0.2857,1,0,3,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,1,7,4,0,1,5,0,11,3,0,0,2,22,18,12,0,6,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,10,5,0,0,1,4,0,2,1,1,0,1,2,2,4,3,12,12,4,13,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,8,9,61,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914738011066256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787598390182142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526692989048218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150906883289583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172964553031308,0.0,0.0,0.17185135297970447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18359600254788644,0.0,0.0,0.16264704116153575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909043937095555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20325217830661174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19957836338981366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506052693692955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16256381510471202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926993427451036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474764876019383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746994187850613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18880134929576914,0.0,0.0,0.16329622370506874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15237327964056302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4416190231672684,0.0,0.0,0.13534267812567696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19874518426481044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149877102436206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19418770817732686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustAGuyInOregon,2020/03/20,"I finally took the time to get the mental health help I needed I have a brain doctor.

That is easier for a crusty old guy like me to say than “therapist.”

Jesus, that was a hard call to make.  I've made it before and given up.  The transfers, the *bureaucracy*.  Folks think it is an easy call.  It took more than I thought.

To be fair, I’d given up before.  I thought asking for help meant that I had to admit I couldn’t deal with my own problems and needed to make them someone else’s.  Getting passed around reinforced these feelings.  My insurance wants to pass me to the VA, and the VA wanted my insurance to handle it.

This time, however, I kept at it.  It took what was in reality an embarrassingly small amount of time, and the VA picked me up.  A woman called me and said she would try and help.  I took a chance and explained where I was.

I talk to her two times a week now.  Well, I feel like I talk AT her twice a week.  Honestly, it feels good to just let it out.  Folks always are willing to talk with me, but I guess I just need to let this stuff out.  I don’t want commiseration.  I don’t need understanding.  I just need to say things out loud, I need someone to listen to it all.  Then, when I am done, tell me how to look at it with fresh eyes.

Most folks don’t wait long enough.  I guess that is what makes brain doctors special.

I’ve known for a while that I’m a mess.  I tell people that I am the sum of my broken parts.  Still, it feels good to let things out.

My brain doctor started using phrases to help me understand where things came from.

PTSD. TBI. Survivor disorder.  Atlas syndrome.  

My problem wasn’t what I was feeling, it is how I deal with and interperate it.

Things happened, and they weren’t my fault. 

I don’t need to shoulder this burden alone.  

If I work hard for people, I shouldn’t feel unappreciated.  I should look at how they thrive when I help, not how I think they should respond.

I still feel like I need to do more, even when I can’t.

I hope she can help with that.",1.2542862266857997,3.333051279411766,2.607152080344332,94.094806312769,81.54901960784314,5.6471544715447175,19.019846963175517,6.807656815369643,-0.025837470109995486,1534,37,349,17,41,495,187,408,0.086,0.772,0.141,0.9364,2,1,0,0,0,0,61.0,0,0,4,1,18,15,0,1,19,0,33,9,5,10,1,78,87,20,0,20,6,0,9,3,0,5,4,5,0,2,32,20,0,2,17,0,0,7,10,6,1,2,21,17,57,9,48,56,8,41,1,0,3,0,34,16,0,5,21,229,89,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812730298648048,0.0,0.0,0.05473347529120396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585573392417721,0.061494572949146474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194632751253426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202936685797333,0.20150342719009573,0.07523375927662124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356307142101105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538854004761024,0.20198306865764512,0.0,0.06731485072040146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494999207640011,0.0,0.0,0.06796738750254293,0.0,0.043446470915770787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23281920299471326,0.09398519515816844,0.0,0.07205778173297628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873372290120157,0.0,0.0,0.11034476561221056,0.0,0.0,0.14492617510315914,0.06513164439395608,0.05816823519202749,0.0,0.11785029498941953,0.0,0.0,0.0699201004800375,0.0,0.0,0.2645420390774076,0.0,0.0,0.06533348205753832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20179073949024484,0.0,0.096409027442074,0.0,0.0,0.058212427848949824,0.11047574339656123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06224176879382817,0.13172416719328722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06628985489567339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3901949150982116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902409345158403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123234819435621,0.0,0.09120588222171473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258834177432996,0.07689224029233131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257098123180475,0.10462035074909842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146882501610526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04655878098147236,0.0,0.10506253816692536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07530132461039737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15861223119555473,0.1149876541962244,0.0,0.0,0.07637459754072314,0.17480282758148255,0.08429717421351003,0.0,0.10444250537347848,0.15342527373386552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923319730660354,0.044659686670845015,0.0,0.06425661632726075,0.13695671243048446,0.0,0.05681201694207182,0.0,0.0,0.11639464096912595,0.0,0.1055280422323676,0.0,0.059143304857637975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04788796353337306,0.0,0.0,0.04672758076718552,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dawnelenor,2020/03/20,"Please help, terrified of developing psychosis/schizophrenia Hello! I've been dealing with this problem since the beginning of this year and I got desperate about it.
I've always been a worrier and ever since high school I've been having health anxiety over different kinds of diseases. 

I graduated from art college last year and moved back to my hometown and ever since then I started to be more scared of going out. I'd be pretty social on facebook, because most of my friends currently live in other cities. I am still a social person and I crave socialization almost every single day but because of my health anxiety I've been having a derealisation/depersonalisation symptom for a pretty long time until present moment. Everytime I go out it intensifies and I try my best to stay present.
Basically to me it feels like this:
- my surroundings seem distant, different, foreign.
- i feel my life as if i'm living in a dream
- i don't feel present and grounded to present
- i'm 24/7 living inside my head, focusing on my worries of why i'm feeling like this.
- i can't focus on my surroundings, i can't focus on my words, it's like when i'm talking to my mom or brother or anyone else i feel hyperaware of my voice and what and how i'm saying anything.
- i began feeling forgetful, i'd forget certain words or struggle to remember their name, because of that sometimes i stutter.
All of these didn't use to happen until these past 2 years. Because of this I began googling my symptoms and found out that derealisation can be a symptom of early signs or psychosis and schizophrenia and my anxiety went downhill from there.

I began researching everything about schizophrenia and read stories of people developing it. I began paying attention to my thought process even more, question my thoughts, doubt them or my senses. Basically if something spontaneous happens i'd get this thought of ""what if i'm hallucinating this? what if it's not real?"" Deep down I know it sounds completely ridiculous but it's like this whole anxiety is messing with my cognition and perception of life. Lately even my house feel strange and distant. I'm scared to death about developing this disease.
Another big concern is the fact that i'm 23 years old, with no family history of psychosis or schizophrenia in my family (excepting for my grandpa who developed dementia very late in life, he was 91 when he developed it). I read that the early onset usually happens in late teens, early 20s and I can't stop thinking about it since i'm in the exact age period. 
I took my concerns to a psychiatrist in late december and he reassured me that i'm not showing any signs of schizophrenia and that it would had happened in my teens when my personality started developing. He however diagnosed me with severe anxiety, panic attack disorder and PTSD (since I have some childhood trauma as well). He prescribbed me some SSRIS and an antidepressant but I couldn't take them cuz they accentuated my anxiety.
I somehow got reassured by him after the appointment but not long after I found myself googling again about it and found out online that the age onset is, as mentioned, late teens or early 20s. I got freaked out because it contradicts what he said and I don't know what to trust anymore.
I'm honestly very scared of losing control over my mind. I'm not having any hallucinations or delusions, only if the schizophrenia fear would be considered a delusion, ironically. I'm just so hyperfocused with my mind and symptoms that I can't focus on my life anymore. I feel like a zombie.
Does all of these sound to you like early signs of psychosis/schizo?",5.908586466165417,7.801723475187969,6.525120300751883,71.96948496240604,67.63157894736842,9.350075187969926,34.653383458646616,9.74208191438628,3.7370457142857134,2921,142,474,67,50,954,293,665,0.13699999999999998,0.7709999999999999,0.091,-0.9834,4,0,1,0,0,1,68.0,0,1,4,3,21,30,2,7,17,0,29,12,1,4,7,111,82,52,1,9,23,3,8,6,1,2,11,5,0,2,40,33,0,2,22,5,1,5,13,15,1,0,23,13,68,15,77,52,10,86,0,1,0,0,33,27,0,21,59,304,108,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05664845012126767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04707223972497094,0.0,0.0,0.07694147923597289,0.059320427398391676,0.2596634688419594,0.0,0.11220797769759014,0.03955629292215216,0.0579644578152189,0.046553741750476905,0.0,0.0,0.06435854879864404,0.0,0.04350019474110964,0.0,0.17242811203123354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059368576379155526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05931441849254428,0.0,0.06345004400035212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03648410787551692,0.05832300488320505,0.0,0.05741914988676613,0.0,0.1182109059085697,0.06483614297751313,0.0,0.04950633212496195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04725844990006047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473023349130566,0.10234479911625216,0.04766415130022778,0.0,0.05084305393886228,0.0,0.10666164915232812,0.0636589626671374,0.2288350703662136,0.12124463904983752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860840585934983,0.04370720472668722,0.0,0.029556411906801063,0.0,0.06430207463940181,0.0,0.13573682339756288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20010489717817287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058058951074171875,0.12026627996411235,0.0,0.0,0.037918861094700655,0.05977117493478085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527622047324168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0589107869680268,0.0621807243039432,0.04611353839597975,0.319077070829141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598332404604681,0.16582863877214565,0.0,0.1498617128247208,0.10012846230207156,0.0,0.06328933369810187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142427101892306,0.06625616656018704,0.0,0.06012683249702935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05936255018460185,0.0,0.0,0.0430253759329287,0.0,0.0663747762790309,0.0,0.0,0.05400415020451739,0.039219738281062316,0.09879256493565516,0.0,0.06209880896377387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11510764431582955,0.0,0.05413153820294273,0.06612936505079489,0.0,0.06337332301569185,0.0,0.113174146744285,0.06439105285107924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640847808881069,0.0,0.05381270260475328,0.044988137555405136,0.16991461511287442,0.05725364564265005,0.0,0.05150080948569729,0.0,0.06390999108922517,0.0,0.23398373991754734,0.0,0.0,0.1730033682057258,0.0,0.04355170796545472,0.05595092137883266,0.0,0.08008357181786678,0.06029797357701865,0.045178284006224964,0.04729652802834145,0.0,0.05914109104026667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23519889598677185,0.04253492627255141,0.04547024120325099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036248902263234115,0.0,0.13473498505969256,0.032987450671848904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285331162613754,0.038408514457147006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048859840646480725,0.06230580592196128,0.09335526036023874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05086481005588881,0.0524425922273623,0.051047218059956365,0.06316035449018118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745137265395803,0.0,0.08037391639899702,0.0,0.0,0.1457214455936278
mentalhealth,kissurhealer,2020/03/20,"need a hug *just a small rant because I feel like I can’t talk about this stuff to anyone* 

Everything in my life has been getting too much for me. I just want to feel like I can talk to someone. I dont want to feel like a burden anymore. I just want to talk to someone that can make me feel safe for a moment. I want to be held, and I want to be told it’s okay to cry. I just need a break. I just need to feel like there is someone out there that wants to be there for me. I don’t think I’ve had that. Getting up everyday is getting harder. Smiling everyday is getting harder.",0.3797619047619065,2.0541692777777807,2.2716666666666683,97.47750000000002,82.41269841269842,5.152380952380953,20.81746031746032,5.985473137389443,-0.12336825396825367,443,13,108,3,12,147,60,126,0.067,0.713,0.22,0.9186,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,10,8,0,0,5,1,14,2,0,1,0,25,36,1,0,9,5,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,2,6,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,5,15,7,18,29,1,8,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,7,69,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611019974542387,0.08891439100783725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751656912876419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13968111509763032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14903252128523767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428470273615825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214837864560889,0.3633772681141598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26574688080523234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981804277210895,0.2484990602650191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488139708024617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347845327433432,0.28286628423592786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232309916956686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556968028983014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066231823232158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814800587047204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150841781903655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.450019458780828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jibes_,2020/03/20,"Please help me help someone Hey everyone,

I’m from New Zealand. I’m not very sure of where to begin for finding help or whether this even is the right subreddit, but this is for a close relative. I don’t want to assume anything, but we have evidence to suggest that he is getting more and more unstable.

I’m writing this because we (my family and I) have previously tried to get him help, but the mental well-being firm we approached said they would not take action if he himself did not want any help. It’s a fair response, but he has a history of drug abuse and behaviour that has landed him in trouble with the police. 

He has recently had a baby with his wife, who has no idea about this past, and more than anything I just want her not to be caught up in all this. He has sold her car and wants to know her location at all times. He recently got arrested for threatening violence to a debt collector of some sort. I had to take care of their kid while they sorted out bail. 

I just want a direction to head in for some help. I feel like I’ve exhausted all I can, or maybe I haven’t, but it feels like I’m shooting in the dark right now. Can you guys help me out here?",4.546499999999998,4.791422316666669,5.400000000000002,84.845,69.58333333333334,9.4,29.333333333333336,9.3871,2.2694083333333337,916,32,199,18,15,300,137,240,0.14300000000000002,0.7070000000000001,0.151,-0.6979,1,0,1,1,1,0,24.0,3,1,3,0,7,6,0,0,10,0,19,3,1,0,4,49,41,15,0,7,15,1,2,2,0,1,2,1,0,2,10,13,0,0,6,0,2,4,7,2,0,0,7,3,25,4,30,32,8,25,0,0,0,0,35,13,0,8,10,128,35,0,0.0,0.14168133245344872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131768919425625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19680633853605606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289413076920788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12191856309964895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386734521946582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789806741539618,0.0,0.0,0.11426267438832922,0.0,0.0,0.11272825686279064,0.0,0.12092527537529753,0.1708542470221512,0.0,0.0,0.10929286311386376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494998229828473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956380955748344,0.0,0.0,0.1184018189409135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272235432111887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5610580753587036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498991775830296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571738499222593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684032974223785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120132983971147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050731207556133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548995680446922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11415150176831265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13126162108639908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361392913515833,0.0,0.0,0.20423929537546293,0.1137468285915244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131873500139964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270161030495922,0.0,0.17981676197952834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972736390516705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118616049635624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866503896215058,0.352653392319334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751570820114466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494535350709824,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crushedpetalz,2020/03/20,"Struggling Hi, Reddit. I’ve never posted here before, but today seemed like a good day for it. 
I’m fucking struggling. I lost my job (wrongfully, but it was a toxic environment) before all this COVID-19 stuff hit, then I went to an interview (very promising) last week. 
The thing is, my field is mental health and community support. The day I interviewed, the company enforced a strict work-from-home policy for an indefinite time period. So now I’m worried I won’t get the job. 

I don’t have much in the way of savings, my partner only makes minimum wage, and I just feel all around useless. I’ve struggled with anxiety/depression/suicidal ideation my whole life but this is the first time in my adult life that I really feel like I have a reason to be down, which makes it harder to pull myself back up. My partner and I have been living independently for a year or so now and it’s tanking my self worth to know I might not be able to keep it up. I just feel so fucking dumb and worthless and panicky and just....pending existential dread 24/7. 

I’m so scared and gloomy. I don’t even know what to do. 

Guess I just wanted to rant.",2.9599999999999973,5.0530792792792845,4.206567567567569,84.6739054054054,76.02702702702703,7.322882882882882,25.51441441441441,8.238735603445708,1.6673614414414413,888,32,175,16,20,291,132,222,0.19899999999999998,0.732,0.069,-0.9855,3,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,0,2,13,18,3,5,13,0,15,5,0,4,3,37,36,17,0,1,8,0,3,2,2,2,3,0,0,4,12,10,0,1,7,0,2,2,5,12,0,1,4,3,21,6,18,27,4,25,0,3,0,2,7,6,3,5,17,111,33,5,0.12497277741926335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11125226767058763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609635172623646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21268525780760567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16119420539100754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254334083908857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18956997382497912,0.0892805771590634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10630178063045248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310706378792049,0.06529311814039539,0.0,0.0,0.10482123640601393,0.0,0.0,0.13767160388282673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284021840614127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24803239594543705,0.11108154672250936,0.0,0.0,0.1373635402982897,0.10186949349110754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17654393715067618,0.12211077285646668,0.0,0.11035325206863086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642254939969106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16684059871375784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259431657276695,0.1325763675575854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186937095522618,0.0,0.09638671027308138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09504742871637993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196893751012258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006076132563633,0.12849282937368972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251195518739752,0.0,0.0,0.11377052291323182,0.13037386239829618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3919460443730784,0.14306393067002016,0.13669993459411134,0.1418176268209645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302636021155622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574526303525254,0.0,0.1184595803101491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311562957893827,0.07371218205489435,0.09919757371143977,0.10024562380400552,0.0,0.0,0.11585101671633685,0.0,0.13952764295343018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09098167037981916,0.12691592179223887,0.0,0.0,0.13663811355269395,0.0,0.08047837126454943
mentalhealth,knk505,2020/03/20,"Help for someone i really care about Hello everyone,

Im a new user to reddit, but ive always found that some of the best answers and solutions to alot of my questions ive googled of all aspects have came from common people like you and I on reddit, which leads me here. 
Long story short, Ive been talking to this girl for a while, and recently she has been struggling with depression. More specifically, she feels a sort of unexplained emptiness that doesn’t feel fixable. Like its a void within her wellbeing. 
I have not personally experienced this to the extent that she seems to have, but i truly wish to understand this as much as i can as well as know what I can do to help. She says she does not want to directly talk about it in the short term, which i sort of understand, so what are some things I can do with her in the meantime to take her mind off of everything until she is comfortable to talk about things with me? 

I really care about this girl and would appreciate yalls help!",9.777783505154638,6.8015910824742285,9.256159793814431,71.89238402061856,60.855670103092784,13.20515463917526,37.136597938144334,11.45678717892309,3.9171257731958766,786,25,156,17,8,253,110,194,0.065,0.715,0.22,0.9875,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,2,7,9,0,1,9,0,18,0,0,1,1,32,31,13,0,3,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,1,0,3,15,8,0,0,9,0,0,2,3,2,1,0,4,4,26,7,36,26,9,16,0,1,0,0,23,7,0,7,9,119,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227762732078334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542193169364924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16807640168696958,0.2996591053725653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657139640993442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860056935815922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404209905127321,0.13207291681276648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486088701942596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16112764338372226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955008127374093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15873570240462626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08076215915577657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435887521631041,0.0,0.0,0.13004980078609776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14838180233459905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802821101604113,0.0,0.0,0.14192923643324626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187950624763606,0.12831469787550873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16462228309229182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18828518642640688,0.0,0.14509949713705808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686384055649188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378154143088514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451377672153215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536283875978394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049123418091722,0.35434854431333423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19525961846846854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059689112111943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667736672932967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321294317860344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16899002322773035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439201377680384,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bruhmoment83,2020/03/20,"Is their anything i can do to process my trauma without a professional? I was sexually abused as a child and its basicaly the root of all my issues lmao. With this whole Corona virus mandatory self quarantine  i figure now is a good time to try and adress my trauma.
Hella free time. Sounds stupid but whatever. I cant access any professionals. Is their anything i can do on my own to try and heal from this a little bit? Im 19 and i dont want to be one of those bitches who just carries they trauma around forever.",2.3313592233009715,4.560618883495144,4.007582524271847,84.675645631068,78.61165048543691,7.226796116504855,23.89223300970874,8.238735603445708,1.5414318446601945,407,14,81,8,10,136,71,103,0.179,0.747,0.07400000000000001,-0.9011,0,1,0,0,1,0,8.0,0,0,3,0,3,7,2,0,5,0,11,1,0,1,1,13,12,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,5,6,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,5,0,1,1,1,13,3,12,10,4,6,0,0,0,0,6,3,1,0,3,57,18,2,0.0,0.2705970559789851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15530858521682586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3758802580668696,0.2033097005712602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493355888297137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676637156120965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915572116724604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466933288919059,0.2383729976040673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22890022660784476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547585439177955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382537586110156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663444656707036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101147573378377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470648262567353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25498197838330644,0.0,0.22015350671148198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bem-te-Vi420,2020/03/20,"Need someone to calm me down right now please Hey, it's 3 AM where i Love, everyone is asleep um the house except for my dad. I watched a horror movie earlier oday and it really fucked me up and i was sorta fine but now i'm freaked out. I need my anxiety meds so i called my dad (he usually doesn't carry his phone around but i had hope). I didn't hear it ring so i figured it was on silent but then someone picked up. It wasn't him. The line was silent and i heard him cough from my room but not from the phone, so it couldn't have been him. I know i'm being kinda irrational but i'm fucking terrified right now. If anyone can help calm me down it would be great. I have a lot of anxious thoughts sometimes, i've even left the house once with a knife while on the phone with my friend because i felt i wasn't safe even though i knew i was alone and no one was there. Please help me.",0.05882323610072149,2.0951371361256577,1.4869857890800342,100.60123909249569,86.01570680628271,5.1040638244826715,17.47220144602343,6.42735559955562,-0.4690929444028922,687,16,170,7,21,219,111,191,0.147,0.7040000000000001,0.149,0.1401,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,12,11,2,0,8,0,20,5,1,1,0,31,35,16,0,6,8,2,1,0,1,1,1,3,1,0,7,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,7,3,1,1,14,5,28,8,16,17,1,19,0,0,1,3,18,13,2,5,6,106,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507884481037174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137677562864193,0.16447647648823788,0.0,0.10180066640424074,0.0,0.0,0.12960692589139994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875096939012972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866476797417802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923230668994024,0.0,0.0,0.13911851352175975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139790265930816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124833051620869,0.2691932098675435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051467669689773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640917253461117,0.0,0.19517326036225247,0.0,0.0,0.1446047903969317,0.0,0.3359851115272102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001304854448155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581851314723026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377632752809248,0.13140163151186396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16171886571329172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21590787806944656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550497457380267,0.09865628190025504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31963056537492496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326937218632607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486679690237337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24671769465846674,0.0,0.14399329819672466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430424942338401,0.11558305268928845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16034800268548147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342372409668492,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Parzi8l,2020/03/20,Loneliness I’ve been dealing with loneliness for a lot of my life I’ve always felt being pushed onto other people because the other person doesn’t want me around and if I’m around for too long they seem to get agitated with me and push me onto the next person I feel like I have no friends or people that care for me I was an only child for a lot of my life so I never got to experience a brotherly or sisterly bond and when I did get siblings I was 12 so was already dealing with problems and they were young I’ve been feeling so lonely and now I’m realizing people aren’t busy with lives since quarantining it’s just people don’t want me around,2.883474747474746,4.480250007407406,4.6674747474747456,83.45818181818183,74.85185185185185,7.2794612794612785,24.124579124579125,8.00094639256281,1.3175185185185194,521,16,105,8,11,177,79,135,0.124,0.78,0.096,-0.7042,1,2,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,2,0,12,5,0,0,6,0,12,2,0,0,1,27,24,12,0,4,4,2,3,1,1,0,2,0,0,3,4,12,0,0,5,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,9,3,15,3,17,14,2,13,0,1,0,0,10,5,0,6,7,73,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16636687338161124,0.0,0.1254439933514768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.402623792959052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919016008825236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15370937286610387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108528797250231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14747173389249613,0.0,0.0,0.15245708093201288,0.10770262744903067,0.14475277639349862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647642710821896,0.0,0.15753124815785685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057615607642135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21297180749009206,0.07365348374172184,0.0,0.1331234135523302,0.13341742641418805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563406964308911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11627503179201272,0.0,0.1603344542488436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465940443900195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4180706604930325,0.26327478640004986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14425649508308694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13724580008230045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247098284936711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17784373566871542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,venus_mars,2020/03/20,"I genuinely feel like I might actually be going mad i just searched for this reddit because i dont know what else to do. i've been in isolation since the beginning of feburary after having something extremely traumatic happen to me that i dont know how to talk about to anybody. which actually isnt true, the truth is that i just don't have anyone to talk to about it, or in general really. i moved/drove across the country, alone, and literally my first day in my new city is when shit started coming out about covid19. i've been alone in a new house (which i am renting from a person who lives there but not full time, so theyve been gone since ive been here, two weeks) in a new city where i know virtually nobody. 

im so emotionally exhausted, my fucking soul is exhausted. usually im a good writer. usually im zesty. i cant really muster much from me lately. i drove to the ocean today though and that was extremely pleasant but also terrifying for obvious reasons. or obvious to anyone with constant gnawing-on-you anxiety anyway. mostly i just can't believe how much has happened to me in the past 2 months and then continuing to be strong and make the right choices, like drive for 5 days straight alone, in a city where i will be alone, in a car with two very unhappy kitty cats and also with me very unhappy and yowling and nearly killing myself in a hotel room on day 3. but i fucking didn't, because im strong, so i kept driving, and i made it, and then \~\*coronavirus\*\~. i don't need to spell out how it's affected me because i know i am not the only one. but, i am the only one in my own head right now and i have been for longer than i ever have been in my whole life. that is a completely grammatically correct sentence. 

so anyway i feel like im drowning in my mourning and drowning in unclichéd utter despair, drowning in fuCKING ANXIETYYY, and, most of what, what i am truly dying from right now, is loneliness. like i think a cat can die from loneliness, i think i might be slowly dying from loneliness. i can't eat anything in a way that i've never experienced before. i used to have a pretty severe eating disorder, but that's more or less managed in my life, and this is different. it fucking sucks, and it doesnt help that i am afraid to go outside now, even to get food. it makes me panic. i feel like the world's end isnt that far off and im terrified im going to go quicker than it. my desire to live and die is so fucking fluid, mercurial, it waxes and wanes. and ""i feel like im going to die"" is how i feel multiple times a day. moribund. 

idk hi my name is silas if youve read this far i bless you with the magical lint dust in my pocket",4.097285351649994,4.890389714548803,5.606073366183863,81.0088024488577,70.82320441988949,8.816863272111895,29.04031655965357,9.068930737419137,2.3018668956249058,2097,78,426,40,37,712,243,543,0.18899999999999997,0.716,0.095,-0.9947,2,5,1,0,0,1,68.0,0,1,0,3,30,28,9,2,22,0,48,14,2,10,7,76,84,42,10,3,14,0,5,6,0,3,4,0,2,1,25,25,3,1,12,2,1,11,14,15,0,5,12,6,53,13,61,65,9,77,2,2,0,5,8,34,7,8,37,281,78,2,0.0,0.0,0.11270374540293612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392302156823372,0.0,0.09235908548999924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04417561555729415,0.0,0.0,0.08075484457450216,0.0,0.04752012766742264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560447674983636,0.0,0.049137685813321536,0.06506009054548295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049743159972946,0.0605456969365038,0.062403029473329236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489658531311351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29965672259829984,0.060332393586809516,0.0661820441473564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353560200606304,0.0,0.0,0.1181773722940448,0.04823946450217108,0.06495660054992154,0.05114591288747063,0.0,0.0,0.03814076057685276,0.05223466188999948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599083969542997,0.16501532809171265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049118811071906944,0.06982682458366075,0.0,0.0,0.2669267377023188,0.030169958727060405,0.0,0.1640922233771473,0.04843469673616865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021293874910264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05926416789587121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03870599982878888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666312569924306,0.0,0.0,0.4990056586184138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388751414378692,0.0,0.12694300592265154,0.0,0.06514012653512521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157556950942077,0.1692709928152348,0.0,0.10198174494128474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05464076486321697,0.07709195272875109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12251899285298005,0.0,0.0,0.046092393514124086,0.0,0.08490006937761456,0.0428180083484758,0.0445373594277295,0.1673146566053731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826051628696885,0.08783703652567004,0.0,0.06775261717053824,0.0,0.0,0.05512519543636996,0.0,0.050421675270456455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058748553260259274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05776173621838844,0.0,0.07398727258385017,0.05937261796245957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14794458547129075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523666673372634,0.05927555136369648,0.0955363566914057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044455776159636286,0.0,0.0,0.040872993380916094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282827054497088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400275030890141,0.05673525919532527,0.0,0.06734444143076891,0.0,0.05473655954211492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128191158986456,0.0,0.0,0.04987409772076817,0.12719836217259278,0.09529317567042997,0.0,0.04583617370307669,0.04632044568972942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447146880223292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1409041,2020/03/20,"What is it if it’s not acute psychosis? Hey everyone. I was hospitalised earlier this year for a month for what they’re calling a brief psychotic episode/acute psychosis. It was my first hospitalisation but not my first episode. I’ve had them on and off since I was 16 but this is the only one where I experienced amnesia and dangerous behaviour. I’m just wondering if this is normal? Does that sound like acute psychosis or brief psychotic episode? Everything I’ve seen seems to say it’s what they call it when it’s just a one time thing, but it hasn’t been for me.",4.043423423423427,5.9023192882882904,4.634414414414414,83.80315315315315,72.33333333333333,9.257657657657658,29.45045045045045,9.725611199111238,2.7593855855855853,455,19,93,12,9,145,67,111,0.046,0.922,0.032,-0.3485,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,2,4,2,1,0,4,0,9,0,0,0,0,15,13,9,0,3,10,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,15,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,4,6,4,8,1,6,7,0,11,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,5,7,60,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4771364037449268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044562013394901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22324895178809911,0.20997672876672585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3974608643403538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141426160431036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864858102817292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289134093595773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31663523371529123,0.1776905003231823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18579650955960733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126931934035406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19326588977747147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521719719559052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623487272730814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25336798242297026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504537497575479
mentalhealth,BDBE1201,2020/03/20,"I hate sharing I have a weird awkward step brother who is a complete bum. I’m 14 I’ve known him since I was 4. He does nothing with his life and he would rather do whatever he wants. He eats unhealthy, he is lazy, never wants to do activities with me, and too pussy to say shit to me and keep it real. He’d rather tell his mom. He sits on his ass all day and relies on others to do things for him. All he does is play video games and eat and shit all day. Thats not even all.

Today I had a sleepover with my cousins cause I haven’t seen them in a while. They asked if he wanted to come and he thought about it. We always play video games that brought us together like Minecraft, GTA, call I duty and we would have a LAN party. But we didn’t have enough TV’s so he had to get the 16 inch one. He deadass didn’t want to come just for that reason. So I finally got him to come over and I feel super awkward. I feel like his ungrateful and unthankful ass don’t deserve to eat out food. Sleep on my couch. Make a mess. Let alone breathe the fucking air I do. I was never raised around lazy bums that get what they want when they want. I was raised around a family where we were broke we needed money. Do what you can to survive. The hustle don’t stop type shit. I just want to know why I feel so mad and also why I feel all this animosity. If I can do something to change it.",-0.02586270871985264,2.037638578231295,1.5709400123685846,99.66778293135435,86.68707482993194,4.652071737786024,17.412492269635123,5.941861826196648,-0.6255700680272112,1058,25,258,8,33,341,156,294,0.177,0.745,0.079,-0.9854,0,1,1,0,0,0,29.0,6,1,4,2,15,17,6,2,10,0,29,13,7,3,7,64,57,20,0,14,8,3,4,2,0,2,1,1,1,0,13,25,4,3,8,7,1,5,8,11,0,1,12,6,39,6,26,41,6,26,0,1,1,3,41,11,6,2,11,153,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544423512736556,0.0,0.08141724989695746,0.0847138986125556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18126459075204054,0.09517840755260047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039591755639139,0.0,0.0,0.1045866960659887,0.10770125517105586,0.2631003499890789,0.10674562467811682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13131778022860965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17818886141033816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125304868876773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10519672546311007,0.0,0.0672444041356796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597720636336134,0.0,0.2059123494363579,0.07273293218957957,0.0,0.11152764525723463,0.0,0.0,0.12310879858710838,0.0,0.0,0.09412150755885307,0.1063828233478101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142658718086312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10051608693684927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049321658044088,0.0,0.0,0.055951996390190537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410740505196472,0.07191126344526552,0.0994782386538922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795882340174103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192383920805618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549066704813459,0.15704396824807051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768923647074187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689889465426874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11588182662760273,0.0,0.10467741745254903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096322898386685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135188499899504,0.08421810789617755,0.0,0.10188331283050757,0.0,0.0,0.07837814802408871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08511754068913245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898624130340953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763789862666336,0.0,0.0,0.08082559863024119,0.0,0.0,0.09650377378893857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246463827650453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.420350351294769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18373499457218911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14464550326690148,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wildfvre,2020/03/20,"My mom believes she's talking to celebrities. Something has happened to my mom in the last 4-5 months. Honestly shes always been super naggy and delusional, she would have us sit for hours listening to her go on and on about herself. One day out of the blue she stopped, I admit its a little better because she would nag allday long and start fights for no reason. 

Shes completely withdrawn from us now, i understand her needing her space but she sits out on the porch all day smokes cigarettes back to back (she stopped smoking years ago btw), and her new thing is talking to random men on FB claiming they're secretly celebs that are in love with her. The celebrities send her love songs and she listens to them allday everyday. And tries to find hidden messages of them confessing their love to her. She doesnt clean up after herself anymore, barely eats somedays because shes constantly outside on the phone. The hallway leading to her room is filled with boxes of random junk. Also i help the best i can but she destroys everything i do. It makes me not want to help anymore because shes set in the messy ways. She also spends money like crazy on things she might not even use. It just collects up and theyre like outdated brand new items computers, cameras, wigs she'll end being nice and giving them to people eventually.

My dad has gotten very weak and sick, hes always spoiled her rotten so i feel like this is a big part of the reason shes become the way she has. Shes really hurting and trying to fill the void by convincing herself some celebrity is going to come make everything alright for her. In reality shes losing real time she could be actually spending with real people lost in a dream world

How do i deal with this anymore ? I feel like im the only adult and responsible one in the house anymore. Im tired of everything falling on me and enabling her to continue this behavior.",5.156248423707439,6.500355532786893,5.536612021857923,80.44036569987391,68.80874316939891,8.144430432955025,30.743589743589745,8.502166056373571,2.4082790248003367,1519,61,274,23,26,485,209,366,0.132,0.705,0.163,0.9535,0,0,3,0,1,0,29.0,2,0,4,7,10,22,3,0,16,1,29,7,0,7,1,52,51,18,0,5,5,3,2,4,0,4,3,3,3,2,9,19,1,2,9,2,3,8,4,8,0,2,3,7,55,14,47,41,5,57,1,3,1,3,65,22,0,4,26,180,64,2,0.0,0.0,0.08379227189556486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611452146593793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733310416145447,0.14289382995378908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3406217290330538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320504285882834,0.0,0.15702830456210587,0.09483161957968786,0.0,0.0967409339777834,0.09011046964503476,0.07594099365257255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396546353443699,0.09002826803443266,0.09279002386374874,0.0,0.06855655765545446,0.0,0.0,0.11075219571534907,0.08852348635700974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786176959570703,0.0,0.0,0.07605128336581735,0.0,0.0,0.05671330565161555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315109312724209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868322811476156,0.12268455843204315,0.0,0.0,0.07847944598743102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236994307777429,0.09759860347503584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593051477198418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151075734013387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456015071484706,0.09907717587720116,0.09192071702872193,0.0,0.1854987945382437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06999178446386026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16779804437196466,0.08605971692872795,0.0,0.07598820211935127,0.0,0.09606145086981802,0.09373225826853664,0.0,0.23249070466262794,0.0,0.11463168044527575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910896503466177,0.0,0.20112910397205747,0.06853696575645905,0.0,0.0,0.06366812717243703,0.0,0.16585873164809367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163692730167979,0.06530452755359685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298389144795646,0.0,0.11905655319377713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19546731174056628,0.05500759215226343,0.17656792255396705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610340179874041,0.0,0.0,0.06077599217869688,0.0,0.0,0.14357468590773784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13803075766986211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409035049837248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05006882181996167,0.09868967864764336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659397907734892,0.0,0.0,0.08938893918643932,0.20657107610251693,0.07416016108113667,0.0,0.07084797099707102,0.050645654375393145,0.13631196073739305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199267349228975,0.0,0.0,0.05529452069026506
mentalhealth,adamrogu24,2020/03/20,"sometimes i can’t remember what it’s like to not feel lonely loneliness is something that has weighed on me deeply for my whole life. i often feel like i am an alien, like i don’t even belong here. i feel pathetic because i actually really wish that i had friends. i get the sense that people just don’t like me. i’m always left out of things. i feel like people are annoyed with me all of the time. every time i’ve tried to foster a friendship and reach out to people, they just stop responding to my messages or ignore me entirely. i have no idea what i’m doing wrong but it makes me so sad. the few people who have tried to be my friend only wanted something out of me, like consistent emotional support for their problems or whatever else. the second i set boundaries and take some time for myself, these people get angry or they stop considering me a friend. no one has even noticed that i’ve fallen into one of the worst depressive episodes i’ve ever experienced. i go onto social media and see everyone posting pictures hanging out and it depresses me so much. i honestly feel like something’s wrong with me. mostly all of the friendships i had in the past were pretty toxic and one sided, which is why i’m no longer friends with any of those people. i feel like only people who want to take advantage of me want to spend time with me and that makes me feel so bad about myself that i don’t even know how to process it. i hate that i don’t even know what it is about me that people dislike so much. i try to be a good friend and a genuine person. and yet people who are otherwise quite self absorbed or mean or manipulative seem to have tons of friends. i don’t know. i just find it so confusing and depressing. does anyone else struggle with this and if so, how do you deal with it?",4.09080994214699,5.29735557938719,4.980515320334263,83.94776890936362,71.20055710306406,7.862909792157702,26.62106278122992,8.263242389622931,1.658799357188772,1419,46,282,21,26,462,170,359,0.187,0.633,0.18100000000000002,-0.8921,0,2,3,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,3,2,21,33,2,2,12,0,24,2,0,5,3,67,53,25,0,6,11,0,7,8,6,0,1,0,0,2,26,21,1,3,15,0,1,3,10,15,0,4,3,9,43,18,37,48,10,24,0,5,1,0,19,10,0,11,17,196,69,0,0.0,0.0,0.07050107085584376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011394489333687,0.0,0.0,0.049129336842978884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05051565055753069,0.07402393094603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06032187588948878,0.04404011402588552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448181607774497,0.18667452375974228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322242023364935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070349189395875,0.08126633026350966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908695725637822,0.06535008372387165,0.06086984986035383,0.06903355806377677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557060494418121,0.20644846001348705,0.0,0.0,0.06603096988685532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.334899615365624,0.0,0.07549046006696261,0.0,0.04105871522138011,0.06059599837201101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713273572575263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155624201409452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11911251693380058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849481842408658,0.0,0.05102904952739623,0.2823635532996225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644870633737512,0.0,0.0,0.07869639995012749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062173361756143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822518457158984,0.0,0.0,0.14686602075831548,0.10989173631672887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896639140974824,0.4507726591257492,0.06308188052142917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919110504180986,0.07349952570381832,0.0,0.06912907317637239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684185612145587,0.0,0.0,0.04628224135955606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183993388284871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05757021544171127,0.06576948200200303,0.0753676890724663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364506839872978,0.0,0.16685407288516238,0.07145252964698713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080074779333802,0.0,0.0755265589336392,0.0,0.0,0.08198320281855204,0.0,0.0,0.10863907173016424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04799662130225371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685074518183375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714961525106995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783659352656207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519021978439038,0.08065938845166598,0.08307862334607835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15797796687539672,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Saori_Yui,2020/03/20,"I can't cope with my BPD So, I'm diagnosed with BPD but sadly I'm underage and my parents don't believe that there's anything wrong with me so I can't go to therapy without them paying, and even though they supported me we're in a rough economic situation, they wouldn't be able to afford any therapy. That's why I want to hear any advice from any of you so I can cope with it better until I'm able to afford therapy",2.4255714285714305,3.6534118111111127,4.895396825396826,82.86500000000002,75.33333333333333,8.6984126984127,26.190476190476193,9.23628265651192,2.1443809523809523,333,12,71,8,7,118,56,90,0.091,0.813,0.096,-0.1531,3,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,3,1,6,4,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,0,0,10,13,8,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,2,0,0,0,2,12,2,13,11,0,3,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,44,15,1,0.3121317319649933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15250575799964033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31839042178403804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842891003001486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17583278760714727,0.0,0.13802757590344344,0.0,0.0,0.3931189897206352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15840356881156342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308003258920187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869582817714577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17589757348392324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732926750235257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542457226778194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17710169525275185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5354247570782177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153333920938121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920516912836356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408251695565915,0.0,0.0,0.15044192558371178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063352482177385,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DapperMail,2020/03/20,When can lying be characterised as compulsive or pathological? What is a normal amount of lying?,5.825624999999999,9.532550312500003,6.705000000000003,61.24000000000001,77.125,10.7,26.75,10.125756701596842,4.47885,79,3,10,3,2,26,15,16,0.355,0.645,0.0,-0.7998,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,9,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,omgmychickenteriyaki,2020/03/20,"how can i find help? TRIGGER WARNING!! EATING DISORDER(?)
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i’m highschool aged (sophomore) and i think i have a problem with food. i’ve never been a chubby kid i was actually rail thin until jan 2018 when i sunk into a depression (had to go to court a lot to talk about what my moms bf did to me and my sisters) and i just couldn’t handle the stress i guess and i left school for the second half of the school year. i didn’t leave bed for 8 months and i would rarely shower. i would just eat and eat and eat and i gained 65 pounds (i was at 120, you do the math) and i’ve recently got blood drawn to test if i’m pre diabetic. this has to stop now and as i’ve never had problems with food growing up i have no idea how to get help for binge eating. i’m trying to eat better and exercise but i cant shake my horrible food habits. any advice on how someone my age can get help for this sort of thing?",0.07731063409820038,2.0924802642487066,2.1176017764618806,96.24967184801382,85.7357512953368,5.126967678263014,17.4806316308907,6.42735559955562,-0.3399585985689617,693,16,164,7,21,231,116,193,0.068,0.818,0.113,0.8477,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,2,8,6,0,2,8,0,17,12,1,4,2,36,26,19,0,6,4,2,1,0,1,2,2,0,2,1,4,14,9,1,3,1,0,3,6,5,0,2,8,1,21,1,23,15,1,20,0,1,0,0,9,6,0,4,11,99,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.10358637391306123,0.0,0.0,0.10372783672596217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721851426444782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938804019257194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914262094815471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165625812822703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6517032116766756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970185084213502,0.0,0.3850683507256212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109172233618241,0.0,0.06032707554199147,0.0,0.08489726699960493,0.0,0.11693538670965052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21344885158569135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982960368772692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239674867642804,0.11533149089523813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024431220864614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243207404306654,0.08472733345342101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373771963965286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20314102850871887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480959677457262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148574536736404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993993079614851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874554157825892,0.12159362851164948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531876121770536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052085734903057,0.06801616518321198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206838554139484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508107896486715,0.0,0.0,0.06835664872178349
mentalhealth,sugatae,2020/03/20,"I can’t do this anymore I can’t do this anymore. I have too many problems to the point where one of my best friends had to block me on everything because I’m too sad sometimes. I need to much help and I always need him to comfort me. I’m a bad person and I’m always sad. Without his support I’ve gone back to cutting myself and suffocating myself. I’ve tried so hard to stop doing it but it actually feels so good i just can’t. I have so many problems. I want to die so bad I need to it’s an obsession I just want to die. I’m so lonely in quarantine I have no one anymore. No one to talk to. I’m stuck I need to die. I’ve tried calling lifeline but no one can help me feel anything. Nothing is helping me, not even therapy. I can’t do this.",-1.1890077605321494,0.8455018841463442,1.7794678492239484,95.58205099778273,94.1829268292683,4.445232815964523,21.47893569844789,6.1124844417494595,0.20652195121951245,575,23,135,6,22,201,80,164,0.32,0.5710000000000001,0.109,-0.9898,0,3,0,0,0,3,15.0,0,0,0,1,12,14,1,1,3,0,14,0,0,0,0,21,30,10,3,8,6,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,9,9,0,4,3,3,22,5,16,27,2,7,0,3,0,0,9,4,0,0,2,88,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.11392599645196265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19428190209011864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34733814660420137,0.0,0.0,0.09607094913625766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976947586275676,0.1949539130437761,0.07116649170501481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12251637069657136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192094018754337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3634877324811741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710877998985267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049226177150928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118059266447252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019667344231366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097919923934895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458032927111413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23475455496527226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367216245133477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582079475801982,0.34625889315380143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201969798409307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164369478214593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193697782495144,0.0,0.0,0.11036148629018466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234178417381037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546350346495016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760380514388682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132480513558791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383497578486573,0.0,0.0,0.13350775042663146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585239896973045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13771810956193362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253773451270148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,friendlyfire69,2020/03/20,"How to radically accept chronic pain? I have the essure coil implants. They are failing and causing horrific chronic pain. I am supposed to be getting removal surgery but I am having trouble scheduling it due to Coronavirus.

I have heard of radical acceptance being used to cope during times like these. I'm not sure how to implement it though. Trying to radically accept this pain is extremely distressing.",5.283857142857143,8.70508588571429,6.028214285714286,67.42803571428573,75.85714285714286,9.214285714285714,37.32142857142857,9.516144504307137,5.00257142857143,332,20,44,10,8,108,52,70,0.265,0.595,0.14,-0.8788,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,1,3,11,0,1,1,0,9,5,0,4,1,11,13,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,1,1,5,5,7,10,0,4,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,32,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638585076591821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419495052895095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254852700348175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8199282444425189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24208065885599936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523565036943526,0.0,0.14977289276329098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17438614381610135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22183829076012346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pixeluni,2020/03/20,"Recent trauma memories have resurfaced So, when I was younger ( about 8 or 9) I was molested repeatedly by my cousin, who was only a year older than me. And for awhile, I just pretended it was a dream (as I don't remember most of my childhood so it all feels like a dream) and most of my family acts like it didn't happen. I understand now that it did in fact happen even if my family pretends that it didn't.
Im just not yet ready to fully accept that it happened as I'm not fully equipped to process this information and haven't been able to see a therapist for quite sometime and it could possibly mess up the whole system i have with dealing with my mental illnesses (severe social anxiety and depression).
But, my aunt had to move in with us about 2 or 3 weeks ago because of certain circumstances, along with 3 of her 4 children. Now, no of them are the one that did things to me but, one of my cousins (one year younger than me) has recently tried to talk to me about it and told me that he remembers it as well.
I honestly don't know how to feel about the situation. On one hand, it feels good to be validated and know that I'm not crazy but, on the other hand, it DID happen. Right now, I'm in a state of shock and it hasn't fully set in so, I'm attempting to figure out how to cope before it does.",5.988746031746032,4.8560339592592605,6.921798941798944,79.78666666666669,66.81481481481481,10.825396825396826,31.507936507936506,10.125756701596842,2.7511269841269828,1019,33,222,21,14,343,141,270,0.062,0.818,0.12,0.9565,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,0,1,2,18,12,1,0,9,0,21,3,2,2,3,44,37,23,0,2,11,3,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,23,14,0,0,11,4,0,2,10,5,1,4,12,6,22,7,43,23,4,28,0,1,1,0,14,9,0,5,16,158,45,0,0.12113797503798775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738150582400527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267021933484222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384458522112343,0.0,0.10307949452387867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671881598109212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12488793311353122,0.1043359603950052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600865829015127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001049003313866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283962037242493,0.0,0.18375299990430247,0.08654099357165036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016047861095666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4284876450471455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308498004219103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314852609828415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836379137618468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207858688248965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875049648513315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283449078447034,0.0921308887026064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656486554012148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884514762098315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23921827231162654,0.0,0.27445142256221083,0.10345116879579104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653128231877696,0.0,0.0,0.13685143123920115,0.0,0.0,0.13616415942489038,0.0,0.1234849102863129,0.0,0.0,0.11980855480257112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097366115710595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065052572771414,0.08047868790705286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575252640267054,0.0,0.0822447333452733,0.0,0.0,0.12610890417468915,0.14571406864523284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716957664546008,0.0,0.10891758764510394,0.0,0.0,0.13524622304342415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560177685198854
mentalhealth,MrAndrewDonald,2020/03/20,"I'm feeling really guilty, and have been for the past week. I work in a grocery store, so I can't work remotely, and I have to be there. I'm so worried that I could be unknowingly transferring it to my older customers. I'm feeling healthy, and well, but I'm a young person with no health problems, so I could have it, and I could just be giving it to everyone in my store. 


And I've had to get mean with my customers, too. I've had to raise my voice to make sure everyone isn't crowding stock, because one person will try to buy too much so that not everyone has a chance to get things like toilet paper and bread. I've been exhausting myself trying to fill empty shelves, and while doing so, I've been getting in people's way and making them wait, because staple foods like rice and beans really needed to go out, because it kills me knowing folks might go hungry if I don't work hard enough. 


I know this is all very minor stuff, especially because there's people working on the front lines dealing with medical care, but the whole thing is fucking me up. I feel like there's just no winning here.",8.09769230769231,5.927512819004527,7.9792262443438915,77.21797963800906,63.34389140271493,10.830950226244346,35.22217194570136,9.120678840339163,2.895821357466064,867,29,175,11,10,280,124,221,0.11,0.752,0.138,0.6813,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,5,14,11,2,0,6,0,23,6,0,2,2,37,45,18,1,6,6,0,4,3,0,2,3,1,0,2,10,13,2,1,6,0,3,4,6,4,1,1,5,5,17,7,20,32,4,16,0,0,0,1,6,6,1,3,8,111,27,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28382286002862833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867647952028385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788052524921327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000219871641665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027122306059272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336725333425077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17656440826199135,0.08315542782072137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075006337325546,0.0,0.0,0.10760894676688176,0.18244092989140034,0.11166047208777027,0.13230440294027782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042705894492327,0.0,0.0,0.12372663287873198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877818400182414,0.0,0.12793962946859838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705999313877801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553943960195314,0.0,0.0,0.1267925719644687,0.0,0.11725968883689535,0.0,0.12348088368119448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556661581378297,0.08630834102077675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887493590530588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111596148606354,0.1613927415514623,0.20327013384948034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137806800701076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14913628633526618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332489410253757,0.0,0.0,0.1097046258355879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546605706073978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580544827386346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604131789339786,0.0,0.09239206267737407,0.09336821064368464,0.0,0.10465662831026834,0.0,0.0,0.1299552625196208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3389592659464425,0.11820877630631968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pink_batty,2020/03/20,"Bipolar Rage I was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder and one thing I'm really struggling with is rage/seeing red. Once it starts, I can't calm down. When it's bad enough, I black out. I'm scared it'll progress to violence...What do I do when I get angry? I don't want to be like this.",1.2579234972677575,3.2661197377049227,3.076639344262297,91.11255464480877,81.13114754098359,7.3453551912568305,23.281420765027317,8.344100000000001,1.3779814207650265,228,8,51,5,6,76,43,61,0.345,0.573,0.08199999999999999,-0.943,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,2,6,1,2,0,0,8,3,0,0,0,5,13,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,2,6,2,6,10,1,6,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,5,29,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519293784194032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30624647658420623,0.0,0.0,0.34580519532821513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117645692093541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576398644838783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474085342633208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213293267858214,0.20445797247396774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932939936902975,0.0,0.2979189368680179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020812876371781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21356386980532865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154304929304049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20045396123059367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17796635726538373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blowdontpopclouds,2020/03/20,"Never Ask A Survivor Why They Didn't Leave Sooner If you’re a survivor, chances are you have been victim blamed/shamed. In the past when it came to sexual assault, it was often the woman that was blamed for “asking for it.” I recall reading a book called “Can’t Buy My Love” that talked about the influence of advertisements. There was a specific rape case where the judge ruled that the woman asked for it simply because the brand of her underwear was Victoria’s Secret. Now, we are finally holding men accountable for sexual assault, but why not for abuse? There is a stereotype that low income or minority females are too “uneducated” to not leave. This is false. Abuse can happen to ANYONE of any social class or ethnicity. Abuse is rarely shown right away. I’m sure if we saw it in the first week we would have run but that simply isn’t how it works, especially in narcissistic abuse. There is a “love bombing” or “golden period” that can last up to a year or more where the narc acts perfectly, the change in their behavior starts slowly and is a brainwash process that has us hold onto the love bomb period in the hopes of them being capable of being that way again. Once brainwash is complete, abuse is the new normal and the voice in your head telling you something wrong is still there but yet you feel trapped to leave. I’ve learned a lot about this type of abuse from this account \*\*@he\_never\_hit\_me\_but\*\* dedicated narcissistic abuse survivors. The handle alone makes me feel validated since I was never hit. Never let anyone judge you for not leaving right away. Leaving is a process and often involves extensive planning to be able to do it safely. No one understands your reality unless they’ve been through it themselves.",6.205158784244244,7.907796821316618,5.799067738857848,78.18936622597793,66.68025078369905,8.808014174730818,29.543546408613878,9.20300075937882,2.5528314297396757,1402,50,244,26,23,432,184,319,0.127,0.6890000000000001,0.184,0.9744,1,2,1,0,7,0,38.0,4,6,3,4,17,13,4,0,24,0,33,5,1,3,5,41,50,14,0,4,12,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,19,7,0,3,5,2,3,3,10,6,0,2,10,4,18,7,34,34,2,37,0,1,1,4,29,15,0,9,18,165,37,6,0.07838599297579663,0.6501220873272481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811842487443345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05330516319377527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096186177075875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21984096630337085,0.0,0.1472924414197238,0.0,0.0,0.04778337376556288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004086290769975,0.08965269369751308,0.0,0.0,0.08292198695663765,0.0,0.08218622227919728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926862656824916,0.0,0.0,0.0858680238279182,0.0,0.06667508558170954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931647471477972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044664315268836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785497775752649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389504631439104,0.0,0.41499724258736,0.0,0.08015498863125997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664096811838698,0.21223925716245012,0.0,0.052323258988555055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181368330378356,0.07570568047006336,0.0,0.0,0.07680163019411575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347852427716218,0.053116377485842935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482829985538038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840720533872772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13388241941508233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648417034080799,0.0,0.0,0.0799046484579621,0.0,0.06034536698589511,0.0,0.0,0.05548200927876056,0.0,0.06259915524578613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387787071956604,0.0,0.0,0.06300369194530395,0.06851281286334145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160258311832186,0.09428869813712963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221915265654035,0.06287651539497525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14146233299876584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057065936459050524,0.0,0.0,0.055683160405997266,0.0857027780797056,0.0,0.050478009490682464
mentalhealth,Dionipa,2020/03/20,"life falling apart I'm really struggling right now. it feels like nothing is going right in my life and every time I try and leave my job my new job falls through or something happens and I end up stuck there and I hate it. this has happened three times now and I'm begining to think there's no hope.

I'm in a long distance relationship and I just feel jealous and anxious all the time, even though I'm doing my best to cover up these feelings. it makes me really sad when she chooses to play games over spend time with me, and I wouldn't expect her to chose me even though I would chose her over anything and it hurts sometimes knowing I don't have the same value. I live her so much and I know she loves me and we have big plans for the future and everything but I just feel so mentally unstable and jealous and it's really stupid. 

at this moment in time I can barely go a few days without having a complete breakdown and I don't know if my antidepressants are working or not because sometimes it feels like they are, but then other days I'm rapidly crashing and my world is falling apartm

I finally stopped self harming in January, but so many things are screaming at me to start again and it's he only thing that keeps me grounded and clear minded.

I'm lost and I don't know what to do. do I tell a doctor???? I'm so fucked 

I'm in antidepressants and waiting for therapy but I've been waiting over a year for help and still.nothing. I've tried other stuff to try and fix me but nothing works",2.4085925058547986,4.443322888524591,3.398542154566744,90.09809426229508,77.49180327868852,6.193208430913348,24.991217798594853,7.1686216300943375,1.0255971896955502,1191,43,246,14,28,381,159,305,0.17300000000000001,0.757,0.07,-0.9855,2,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,1,5,16,17,5,1,8,0,19,5,0,1,2,60,53,38,0,5,12,0,5,2,0,2,3,1,0,1,17,24,0,4,11,2,1,5,7,11,0,1,3,6,35,6,25,48,5,45,0,3,0,2,14,18,1,4,24,159,52,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112485922483034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103644117867474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060029376942728176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334331821054556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324904517839584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270163106397549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079321931138158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721952075218263,0.0,0.0,0.13008346789922173,0.0,0.08296933926117322,0.0,0.0885028784999563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24895930786218165,0.14070095751921893,0.0,0.10787442500362228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103844598321,0.0,0.0,0.11193109497217284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17416203424268956,0.0,0.0,0.09722356333192056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600564081686452,0.0,0.0,0.09780778204578124,0.0,0.0,0.10541940295573804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954422603201456,0.08752900397769384,0.0,0.0,0.2164768896348601,0.0,0.0,0.10427068640106506,0.0,0.0,0.13911144949846072,0.09621971100000083,0.0,0.08695512913045653,0.08714717593639884,0.0,0.0,0.10749697156164106,0.0,0.08887742999449867,0.0,0.0657327515655583,0.09983807890452306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992395242882112,0.0,0.09943156356757438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239037241582415,0.0,0.0,0.0951076592444044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834679291134922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489458881022011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892566021078496,0.0,0.0,0.10572517515568852,0.0,0.16819403042789172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273078343925662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581077885618588,0.19478836195425606,0.0,0.06970103167840698,0.0,0.07864217175167036,0.08232941472389746,0.0,0.10294733280549083,0.11273018540120153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607139146261307,0.0,0.1126146151528107,0.0,0.1308446781239882,0.0630987311780585,0.19350215246541674,0.0,0.28710749184584433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20057395209494547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492627672789426,0.0,0.14338178074646316,0.0,0.0,0.0699537341539289,0.0,0.0,0.06341459843127703
mentalhealth,AshCasual15,2020/03/20,"Vent from tonight # I just almost had a meltdown and prevented the crying by venting in my notes app. If you read/comment, thank you. I really appreciate any attention this gets. I just needed to put my feelings out there. If you feel the same things I do, don't be afraid to reach out. I'd love to talk about it and hear that I'm not alone in this. 

# So here it is: 

I feel another episode coming on but I'm back home so I have to keep it under control.

I don't feel like I can let out my emotions here. I can't cry and scream like I can in my own place. It doesn't feel safe here. I'm not sure why and I'm hoping continued therapy can help me figure out why.

Right now I just started thinking again and it just feels like another episode like the other night is coming on.

I started by thinking about my transition. I was working through a situation in my head where I confront my parents about their support once I'm 6 months on hormones whichis coming up soon, I think. Should be April 29th I'm pretty sure. Yeah, April 29th is 6 months on. BUt anyways I was thinking about that and got overcome with emotion because transitioning is hard enough with a supportive family and I know we still have a ways to go before we get to 'supportive'.

Anyway then I went to brush my teeth and get ready for bed so I could focus on not crying.

I came back to my room and started thinking about it again and then the self doubt came in. Maybe I'm just a lesbian - except that I don't date women, so maybe I'm just a tomboy but I've always been feminine. 

And then I started thinking about the most upsetting thing which is a lack of continuity that I feel with everything that's happened to me in my life. It's like I know that I'm the same person, or I think I am, but I'm never sure and it doesn't feel like I'm the same. Then I get to panicking because I start questioning reality and I have no sense of self and it's really disturbing and scary to think about. It's like my entire life I've felt like a secondhand observer of what's going on but then the more I think about it the more layers and observers there are and it it starts getting scary and not making sense. I've pretty much deeply convinced myself since I was a small child that nothing is real and therefore it doesn't matter. Now I'm still alive and still not quite all there and it's getting more and more scary and disturbing to realize that. It's almost an existential crisis but in a way it's kind of opposite because I'm not contemplating the vastness of the outside universe but rather contemplating the intricacies of my 'self', whatever that means, and whether or not it or I even exist, not to mention the wierd confusing body aspect. I'm just a bundle of confusion and the more I think, the fewer actual convictions I have. I used to try to figure out things about myself by making statements in my head or out loud and guaging how truthful I felt when saying them, until I discovered I didn't feel any different when I was lying. I then got scared that I was a psychopath, but reasoned that if I were, I wouldn't be scared of being one. 

I have so much more going on than I can ever really get to in one go. And I'm sure theres more to add to this but now I'm just tired. It's a good thing I can type nearly as fast as I think otherwise this would not be a good way to record whats troubling me. Writing this by hand would be hell. Video is best, provided I'm not crying too much to understand, but in this house I don't feel comfortable doing that.

I don't want my parent's to talk to me about any of this. I just want to be left alone and not questioned but I can't tell them that because then I'm going to get a lecture on how they either deserve to know or I need to tell them or some bull like that. If I get into family problems now though I'll never stop writing so I'm going to stop now, maybe post this somewhere, I don't know. 

Anyway, this is me signing off for now even though I haven't let everything out. 

Good night.",2.8716835643196,4.269761235792021,4.125567110036279,88.1455025579016,74.48972188633616,7.3141400799925576,24.694056366849594,7.934916379859209,1.2122500939447494,3150,99,675,46,65,1034,306,827,0.166,0.735,0.099,-0.9955,3,2,0,0,0,0,64.0,2,3,5,4,61,42,2,9,31,1,57,10,5,8,9,177,150,72,0,17,45,2,14,9,0,4,3,4,3,6,50,47,0,6,37,1,0,13,28,14,0,2,16,19,86,28,92,120,21,100,1,0,0,2,31,37,1,20,55,461,136,3,0.0,0.0,0.04791820475395973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983406827823212,0.10171341171862723,0.0,0.0,0.04085827754101983,0.0,0.0,0.10017676016929536,0.10297918691171436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551554972549232,0.0,0.1197328310428178,0.0,0.041783699051356336,0.0,0.05153138633486316,0.0,0.0,0.05454322853582015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232328298628848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689567234012286,0.0,0.0,0.055074063246263086,0.0392053717203793,0.0,0.2157527808806363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05130299758634125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104702838097952,0.0,0.050737329715353,0.0,0.0648651655101348,0.04441717912302221,0.0,0.0,0.08826262021966531,0.0,0.09258134496066613,0.0,0.2482834593905477,0.1052392480494424,0.09429465620003916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23089227941447266,0.0,0.16744085436111086,0.12355775970543095,0.07854555516255418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04342230938018147,0.0,0.04398734079418661,0.0,0.1007892868743445,0.0,0.0553435274042637,0.0,0.03291322783234349,0.0,0.049255093762826295,0.048771131897358856,0.0,0.056659167877021084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04364569473462143,0.0,0.051134029274215065,0.1079446105031798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05335139928670317,0.10042388130766784,0.06936690220361505,0.21590663372262228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04431807746065683,0.0,0.06555430722433901,0.0,0.1479940372500088,0.05348841032387159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838833544044205,0.0,0.10829078200153418,0.07281965950159343,0.07574372264661378,0.0,0.0,0.09216113994981848,0.0,0.04711640004607595,0.0,0.0,0.05229392179390559,0.06654798259245567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904787052107033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0428755255827453,0.05130299758634125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04702784650357352,0.09991239223006954,0.0,0.046985684652792827,0.0,0.04936286019762328,0.11001494025355454,0.05222791300335305,0.04911706692907905,0.05589085040183938,0.09437141412252308,0.050486862776960524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041934358753312084,0.0,0.03904929574271399,0.09832289750278674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15367785111484705,0.0,0.0,0.040619153205771336,0.055194704681759466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20853544400659693,0.0,0.11764302341709935,0.08210591551196011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16716715865539894,0.18511892140700828,0.0,0.0,0.07893551468102324,0.08583773392688591,0.04520816217151083,0.05615445043644092,0.0,0.1304894747918015,0.34610090568669644,0.09648842661513707,0.0,0.0,0.056437570214522025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03333824251400338,0.0,0.0,0.051118765415665665,0.0,0.042409898942728584,0.0,0.0,0.057925361882611014,0.11692888193500307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04551969485019912,0.0886170454338603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03574813575258641,0.0,0.0,0.06976383113435916,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cclmcl,2020/03/20,"Is it bad that I'm indifferent towards people dying? Ever since I was a kid, I've never cared much when humans die. I cry if one of my pets dies, but when my baby nephew died when I was a kid I just didn't care. Now today, my grandma died, and I am once again indifferent. I don't know why I dont care, but I just don't. Is that bad?",-0.3220864661654161,1.0477663026315795,2.7732330827067675,94.51763157894736,83.34210526315789,5.395488721804512,16.1203007518797,6.1826913282559595,-0.6645541353383457,253,4,65,2,7,91,48,76,0.408,0.5920000000000001,0.0,-0.9859,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,2,9,14,7,5,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,3,0,11,3,2,11,1,9,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,8,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400862541076663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4397536215332634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15792614952972342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7460601563295188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849902884032333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004947687328694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901301030592146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10568853333746213,0.0,0.11088537927346458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531118658867066,0.09742323233935034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996729973697204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892920103763292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362784916515067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973134075905815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThirtyFourFord,2020/03/20,I can't do this Sometimes the silence is too much for me. I can't take it. It's so loud. Someone help me.,-3.857999999999997,-2.9027367999999982,-0.4239999999999995,107.00800000000002,117.0,2.0,17.0,3.1291,-1.3602000000000003,80,3,22,0,5,28,20,25,0.0,0.865,0.135,0.4522,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,16,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3717427626453762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40770147365814857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4699184572497671,0.0,0.5485225422244632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4169969916022997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SilverShadow651,2020/03/20,Coronavirus sadness I’m super sad because of all this. My university went online for the rest of the semester and I feel kinda lonely and sad. Anyone else feel like this? Im also sad because it feels like the world is ending and this doesn’t help my depression,4.339117647058823,6.089776196078433,5.578578431372549,77.77610294117648,71.35294117647058,8.237254901960785,26.47549019607843,8.841846274778883,2.182290196078431,210,7,37,4,4,70,36,51,0.271,0.555,0.174,-0.7584,0,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,9,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,7,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,1,3,3,3,3,6,2,3,0,6,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163613920546298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18917717184614688,0.2772138485944297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3298535850670872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330271778536948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260125820061261,0.0,0.23962993681734146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41039966304752296,0.3865666913748336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813461872081837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922440125111136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643573717061047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25080563796455346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LarryWasHereWashMe,2020/03/20,"Fainting due to trauma/anxiety Hi all,

Mods please feel free to remove if this post is out of line for this sub. I am posting this as I feel I need some answers as her PTSD behaviours leave me feeling very anxious myself when I can’t solve them..

My girlfriend is amazing! She’s lived through many sexual and physical, mental traumas and is a beaming ray of sunshine and mine and many others’ lives. 

However, she’s fainted most of her life - since she was a little kid. She recently got checked out and doctors sort of shrugged their shoulders and said try to avoid things that make you faint and put your legs up if you feel it coming - this doesn’t really help us rather than manage it. You cannot always avoid situations and you can’t always put your legs up!!

Some words I’ve heard she relayed to me are vasovagal syncope and vagus nerve. Unsure if these will help - she was hooked up to a heart monitor for a few days but nothing conclusive came back based on results. 

Fellow Redditors who have experienced traumas and/or live with anxiety; have you faced fainting due to anxiety or stress? What do you to manage it? How have you gotten medical professionals to acknowledge this and treat it properly? Note we are within the Canadian healthcare system.",6.598846153846158,7.5557817051282115,6.3281880341880345,77.47792307692309,65.28205128205127,9.65880341880342,33.121367521367524,9.725611199111238,3.1862259829059827,1005,41,177,20,15,314,155,234,0.096,0.8270000000000001,0.077,-0.6777,1,2,0,0,0,0,24.0,2,9,2,1,4,9,0,3,5,0,17,12,5,3,1,41,29,19,0,5,6,0,4,0,2,1,7,2,0,1,15,16,0,2,7,0,2,5,4,5,0,0,7,8,30,5,26,21,5,22,0,0,1,0,30,8,0,8,6,117,45,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21868074815519734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015758436750723,0.14845145193473566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104315395296937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502935331404356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319469083155988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474604196239881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13449967725033415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657714222023972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509743558063817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557168215394706,0.17615743295476394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13914005092235826,0.0,0.0,0.09281599093271714,0.0,0.13170340028036806,0.34810189266333563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771456979691547,0.2664502529375096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237778741462067,0.1324264080305438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743593329545007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608766488150747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442444005542072,0.0,0.0,0.2517013754974005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15360665977260246,0.26419878293350185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418209106693451,0.0,0.12974763775728573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249972609611986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870045615054268,0.1477059244836568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15052520524104268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730035163988971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921609345649004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806531843933114,0.0,0.0,0.1084237668479288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jbooxie,2020/03/20,"I’m so scared I will never be able to get back to my life (RANT) So I’m gonna start with I have been mentally unwell for a while, but things had started to get worse when I moved from home about a year and a half ago. Suicidal ideation almost everyday, sleeping all the time, wasn’t taking care of myself. It was bad. But then I started seeing a therapist and got on meds, and things really started to turn around ! I was being more active, had a good job, didn’t even think about hurting myself, things were going good! 

Well then September 13th happened. That was the day I found out I had a brain tumor and needed surgery that week. I had to uproot this life I had worked so hard for and go back home to live with my parents. Surgery and recovery went and are going fairly well, but life is still so weird. My dad is constantly stressed and over bearing to me when I’m at his house, which just stresses me out more. And it’s only been getting worse recently, and I know it’s out of love but geez it’s suffocating. My mom is better but it’s still weird when I’m over there , because she lives in a motel and has been having a lot of financial problems, as well as she is a recently recovering alcoholic. Which has caused some stressful situations since I’ve been home. But even all this was okay, my treatments are getting close to being done and I was on track to move back to the city by August. 

And then the damn corona virus happened. My dad has gotten even more over bearing since I’m high risk, my moms not allowed back to her job since she coughed, and I just feel hopeless. It’s starting to feel like I’m never going to get my life back. Like things got better just to get so much worse. The only thing that makes this better is I’m happy that I get to be with my mom , because the thought of her alone, stuck in a motel in the middle of this makes my heart break because she deserves so much. And I know my dad is happy I’m home so he can make sure I’m alright. But I just miss being normal. I’m only 22 and I don’t get to go out and see friends, I don’t get to work, I don’t get to do so many small things I took for granted and I just want my life back. I’m just so scared things will never be normal again. I don’t know, I just needed to rant because I’m quite frankly scared and just don’t know what to do. If you read this whole thing thank you and know I appreciate you. I hope we all make it through this crazy time.",2.5140324165029457,3.822429202357569,3.4910211198428307,92.69829985265228,75.24754420432221,6.347367387033397,22.54818271119843,6.742157984588678,0.37888719056974507,1900,50,429,16,40,609,210,509,0.154,0.6970000000000001,0.149,-0.5231,4,1,1,0,0,2,48.0,1,3,0,6,39,35,1,7,17,2,47,11,3,6,7,80,114,46,1,8,17,7,3,2,1,3,7,0,4,0,28,30,1,0,10,3,0,9,11,15,3,1,26,5,51,20,52,79,11,63,0,3,2,1,21,18,1,5,37,279,79,5,0.056208672494100616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04982559672878888,0.0600699767473337,0.05628486617692207,0.058215233055208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05003763545034396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25932599756202634,0.04693189369475545,0.1370571401694706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14913600921513598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274746782750165,0.0,0.0,0.057308487719383135,0.05774179004287356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060741606469388684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036249943731239104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05752098719572625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113758941972132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05684158738931379,0.0401554868608093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061629908162667765,0.04342668093730144,0.0,0.29366711450764343,0.0,0.15972341953881666,0.09429033537129597,0.08991042030696915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941028690908316,0.11967035413197626,0.05035193004628069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666075475397156,0.0,0.059387548560282735,0.22552752594642825,0.055827894508646704,0.0,0.06485726133736368,0.06017254644035061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155686861989517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445408209489464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19850923835257295,0.05492143634180507,0.0,0.0992665752058176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04778660331333446,0.05073052145901845,0.0,0.15007890142922864,0.05698677160901915,0.0,0.0,0.062435163802783834,0.0,0.056645121453191276,0.0,0.0,0.1974927536544861,0.0,0.1194818468463961,0.08263968347182447,0.08335603687374507,0.13005478014658328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101451296260806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282476848746553,0.0,0.0,0.06241307895678101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05378410842982116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059784842059732286,0.056223883359148775,0.0,0.0360087149050382,0.0,0.11099856604629728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16882406054637786,0.0,0.08958206923287579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13948918419454384,0.06318090293442719,0.05624926572515266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989239384788702,0.0,0.08977663692298198,0.0,0.1931605332981346,0.0,0.0,0.061483164671836836,0.0,0.05297600862337474,0.0,0.04226192645996135,0.0,0.0,0.051749393759253234,0.0,0.06526260104870482,0.29874035519605874,0.036016247727499215,0.0,0.04462340739067154,0.06555145789896094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06244990332622299,0.0,0.06113889494695745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0331533313535083,0.0,0.04508720661990851,0.0,0.1516150408871696,0.052106002532623694,0.0,0.06275497551224538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184116603552738,0.0,0.17184431793816962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0361965422124837
mentalhealth,medievalfurby,2020/03/20,"Struggling with psychosomatic symptoms Heya, I'm 16, and imma start w a lil synopsis. Raped by stepbro, his friend, his friends dad, numerous strangers, and my grandfather. Beaten bloody and literally tortured by stepmom, dad, and grandmother. All this abuse stopped at age 10-11, only people still in my life is my dad and grandmother (kinda). I'm diagnosed with PTSD, MDD, GAD, insomnia, and bulimia. I have reasonable suspicion I have a personality disorder due to how I interact with people, especially those close to me. I also have reasonable suspicion that I have POTS, the fucky nervous system thing, because if I stand too long my legs turn purple and cold, I have horrendous circulation, and showering or even light jogging raises my hr to 180+, it usually rests at 110. 

My life took a big turn, my dad works in a nursing home on the covid floor and my mother is definitely immunocompromised. Shes my third mom but the only one who treats me like a person. Plus, she lost her health benefits bc she wasnt able to turn paperwork in on time, which is shitty. My grandmother lost her job, which means she is staying with us for a month or two. Now, my father has changed quite a lot in the past 5-6 years, and seeing him every day and working on getting over my fear of him brought me to the point I am now, where I'm not afraid. But my grandmother has not changed, she isnt allowed to beat us but prolly would if she could. She lifted her dog off the ground by the scruff of his neck, genuinely threw him into the dog cage, and slapped him hard numerous times. He's 14 months old. She is very unpredictable and is homophobic (literally half of my house is bi but she doesnt know, she only knows I am). Anyway!

So my physical symptoms are lethargy and fatigue, muscle weakness, cold sweats, twitches, and complete inability to sleep. I mean I took 2 doses of tylenol PM (benadryl+tylenol) and only got 3 hours, without it or with one dose I get none. I cant walk up or down steps without feeling out of breath, and walking up my muscles protest as if I had just ran a half marathon. My chest kind of feels like its caving in, not like the bones or whatever but idk how to describe it. 

I'm on 225mg Effexor and a starter dose of Welbutrin. Effexor really helps my anxiety and PTSD but even that isnt cutting it lately. Is there some way I can treat this, or anything? I dont see my psychiatrist till May.",4.852408534589959,6.1431647991360725,5.581170233654035,80.03787093396166,69.47516198704105,9.240630931343674,31.308920740886183,9.573946990214177,2.8822705543556517,1894,80,366,42,33,616,268,463,0.132,0.809,0.059000000000000004,-0.9809,3,0,0,0,1,0,73.0,2,0,0,7,14,22,5,4,18,0,30,23,7,5,1,68,56,41,0,5,21,7,3,3,2,2,14,0,2,2,14,28,0,1,8,2,0,9,12,13,0,6,10,9,60,9,47,43,5,58,0,3,3,2,37,24,0,13,24,230,74,4,0.08795566034625044,0.10421307489429166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033810980139164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728583941965245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238001415701004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05361695417215029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186090852283934,0.0,0.0922198364465772,0.0,0.0,0.07022543776926045,0.0,0.0,0.0567241245330993,0.0,0.0,0.08927314379933893,0.0,0.0,0.1008048068778543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308337886622863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618776825821868,0.0,0.07410643733824067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897457101868244,0.08894604928591618,0.06283554132573324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590865000012806,0.0,0.0919064045898208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07034617648138188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879099541789825,0.0,0.0,0.09349275395596113,0.0,0.0,0.0589548251043433,0.0,0.08822669879348312,0.0,0.0866186081224911,0.101489022886564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728242111261927,0.0,0.0,0.091592285268943,0.0966762613741234,0.0,0.09921781594947278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425136812091972,0.12891207849949726,0.0,0.0,0.07783799160321353,0.0,0.0,0.1920279866760686,0.07477675710220318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916189984049141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301260636190272,0.14041073788485986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229466979877476,0.0,0.1192020635220012,0.2675769725086947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396363019091205,0.12195476046728032,0.15359898001274627,0.0,0.0,0.08314652880906677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20563092024806304,0.0,0.0,0.09355167145447063,0.0,0.0,0.056346648251209185,0.18086613566097987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14017854727645596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801918087225369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06225546909837541,0.09374903105611093,0.07024150396947385,0.0735348704432272,0.0,0.09195035341518322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18283921744121975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05843383246620114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257530573716493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19544394990626912,0.0,0.28701150405913284,0.08591989970097884,0.0,0.2115996594034401,0.0,0.09687073358929904,0.07257263124758621,0.0,0.06981510918385546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.169572235737453,0.0,0.12806553655785838,0.0,0.0,0.06248117753879742,0.0,0.0,0.0566405615233855
mentalhealth,moonphasedx,2020/03/20,"Spanking 2 Cope? This is my first post on reddit ever so bare with me.
I suffer from mood disorder, depression, and anxiety.
I take meds to help deal with my conditions.
I got pregnant with my daughter last February and weaned off the meds for my baby girl in the womb
Let me tell you I suffered immensely mentally and emotionally. My doctor retired and I have been off my meds till I can find a new doctor. ( I have an upcoming appointment in a few weeks)
During this time my husband decided it will be a good time to cheat. [A whole different story]
We are working on our marriage and it's hard but hes literally doing everything he can to make it right.
As a result of his cheating our sex life has changed.
[Readers, I am going somewhere with this so stay with me...]
I take care of everything in our house hold including our kids. It's a huge burden. I make sure we always have food, clean clothes, and a roof over my head. I am the head of the home, my husband, not so much. 
But in bed my husband takes over. It's the only time I can give in and have my needs taken care of. It's the only time my husband feels in control, like a provider.
I am a submissive, my husband a dominant.
It works for us. I find spanking sexually pleasurable UNTIL I found out he spanked his other woman too. He called her his sub. 
So naturally that died and I no longer found it sexually pleasing...
Instead, I found myself hurting extra mentally and emotionally one night and asked him to revert back to our old ways to see if it will make me feel better, he did and instead I found myself wanting more pain, and felt no pleasure. 
I didnt tell him right away, but I asked for it harder and more pain. I needed pain. I wanted to hurt outside as much as I hurt inside. I needed it. 
When I told my husband he said doesnt want to anymore cause he doesnt to hurt me but I need the pain.

Also, should mention I'm a cutter. Have been for over 16 years. I try to stop and do good, but sometimes I fall off the wagon and cut so idk if it's because I'm coping and using spanking cause I dont wanna cut?

I tried to google using spanking as a coping mechanism but all I get is how spanking affects kids.

Any input will be appreciated.",1.6368784255107125,3.8236732757847527,3.5412526158445448,87.32634329845541,80.81614349775785,6.296283009466866,24.036671649227706,7.471455274886353,1.1834382262082714,1715,63,349,26,45,577,221,446,0.175,0.728,0.09699999999999999,-0.988,1,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,8,1,0,5,13,26,4,0,21,0,32,12,3,11,3,68,68,38,1,11,9,7,4,1,0,4,7,1,3,4,17,24,1,3,10,0,0,2,7,16,0,2,13,6,68,9,48,48,8,41,0,7,1,2,45,19,0,2,18,235,85,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057313733398660076,0.0596344117049644,0.0,0.0,0.04873742864961807,0.0,0.05482664622197048,0.0,0.07107646436302734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13400182105592373,0.0,0.06733545518119836,0.05510909482094037,0.0,0.043688802922736455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338547272791485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731821386764541,0.0,0.14614279694885385,0.14724776439781884,0.07581637838894421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038296177795566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738876693651493,0.061728469295375,0.0,0.07438118478111118,0.07487892940888534,0.08213896908822604,0.14671267031954555,0.0,0.0,0.08399562215780793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16123612600320003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482878148586148,0.0,0.0,0.12882308675528809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247607548783205,0.0,0.06881355122919422,0.0,0.131008472343571,0.06096167859824163,0.08666252999432919,0.3143257661481427,0.0,0.0,0.03744413366497773,0.06875150731424877,0.040731186947274636,0.1202252396179175,0.057320306386584814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420141397526043,0.0,0.14710629499445124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048038270265376284,0.0,0.07188992578236061,0.0,0.0,0.08269649009669516,0.3068929084078191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058419861683780064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328648493441192,0.05062198719164522,0.03501388990903831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351899228223233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388245571260962,0.0,0.14445114174382548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537003297554816,0.21256684404150994,0.0,0.06921843925076593,0.0,0.06725657190820894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752046381954336,0.0,0.04856482004251237,0.10901512216696294,0.3050437954590821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867112255058331,0.0,0.0,0.06863916270519252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224099969445884,0.06817370239526346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05711097376301196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07088254776641523,0.0,0.0,0.0763896980954461,0.0,0.059918555843886875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754725503590657,0.0,0.16165867526155006,0.0,0.12528386101636274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671632559619793,0.0,0.0,0.06848287249054154,0.0,0.09731719491131546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620907286632899,0.12379813962434033,0.0,0.0,0.12681683198216098,0.05688757582852574,0.057488608967565635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001596280749919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10435188037549782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04615253454873894
mentalhealth,walkthyplank,2020/03/20,Im Evil I purposely do things to destroy relationships or friendships. I purposely hurt people who are my friends cause Ive created this villain persona that is me which helps me deal with my anxiety and depression. When I drink I attack others.  I dont want to admit I have a drinking problem cause that would make me weak. Sometimes online I attack people I don't know cause i find that its easier to get negative responses then positive ones. Im almost 30 now and this is something ive done for all of my 20s. Now I have nothing and nobody left. Ive pushed everyone away. This villian persona  is all I know and I dont know how to change.,1.373203125,3.974253664062502,3.2940625000000026,85.69468750000001,86.578125,6.6375,25.1875,7.865858978985527,1.8766625000000008,511,22,97,11,16,171,78,128,0.273,0.611,0.11599999999999999,-0.9704,0,0,3,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,5,10,5,0,1,0,15,3,0,5,2,22,22,8,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,11,5,2,0,5,2,0,1,4,9,0,1,1,0,21,1,8,20,2,7,0,2,0,0,6,2,0,2,4,67,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389839721365136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106178428068627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31580058179275844,0.13040324873200262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4277446434644796,0.1468275817310242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309240355654276,0.11954464276968615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14203632032358773,0.3253353520569163,0.2719341414790876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326253610558451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12685687175534685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723331195990107,0.0,0.07251509123579589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303191742320296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14858380388719422,0.0,0.29984662217516395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288356707620569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508020725933004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264729256419073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317833974514287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405164471802682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19244710140481214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328088620465166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490147757511752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068518088916937,0.13727262230972267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220978040551266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186537508297183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985965735460328,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway_acc_oops,2020/03/20,"Does anyone know of any mental illnesses that match the things I’m feeling? Heya there. I’m a 13 year old girl, and recently I’ve been having some problems.

My mom is very mentally ill, and an alcoholic. I watched her physically abuse and emotionally abuse my dad for about 5 years, before she ended up in jail and my dad finally filed for divorce.

I have pretty severe trichotillomania, and about 3 months ago, I started self harming.

In the past month or two, I’ve been feeling pretty bad. I feel guilty, sad, and sometimes I even have suicidal thoughts and have the urge to hurt myself. The thing is, it’s off and on. Sometimes in the middle of the day something will just cause me to feel like this, and I’ll feel like that for an hour or two, and then go back to my normal smiling and laughing self.

I’ve asked some of my online friends about mental illnesses that maybe would fit these characteristics, because what I’ve been told, it’s not necessarily normal.

Here are some more things that I noticed;

•My jaw suddenly will start chattering when I’m anxious or stressed

•My body will start to feel sickly

•I commonly think about how people would react to my suicide, and come up with whole scenarios in my head

•I have lost a lot of motivation (to draw, to play video games, etc)

•Occasionally I will get very strong urges to hurt myself

•I feel useless, worthless, like a waste of space, and things along that line

•My mood can change pretty quickly

•I feel like the people around me would do just the same, if not better if I was gone/dead

I’m not asking for a diagnosis, just please tell me if you know anything that would fit those characteristics.
Thanks!",6.599013780508053,7.002490179810728,6.2531197077868175,79.94721401295037,65.18296529968454,9.197343516520007,30.24887929603188,8.99025400887824,2.2540006309148266,1325,43,256,20,19,412,180,317,0.18899999999999997,0.675,0.136,-0.9732,0,0,2,0,3,5,38.0,0,1,0,4,15,21,0,1,14,0,22,8,3,4,0,57,49,22,2,10,12,3,8,4,1,8,5,0,0,3,16,17,1,0,13,3,0,2,3,10,0,2,7,9,23,10,32,34,8,36,0,6,1,0,16,13,0,10,25,150,39,1,0.0,0.194587709964976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279074674909443,0.08775687100025713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05584159411104138,0.0,0.0,0.09276753754888108,0.0,0.057417311853904335,0.0,0.06757434811481894,0.07310051638347996,0.1535344705060457,0.0,0.0,0.0631420202108254,0.06856330506156298,0.05005706020208447,0.0,0.06987454053037652,0.0,0.0,0.07262479656149119,0.0,0.09121219804640633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08435559816229336,0.08686768149795958,0.07073553404292215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0529579302014651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718601340109413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236927915336356,0.07273027013514329,0.0,0.09158087948588944,0.054236744703678515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33216192994083443,0.17599073969441698,0.0,0.0899539002682535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634425022838592,0.0,0.04290214260155994,0.0,0.046668330114877365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427455288332739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086757161712177,0.0,0.17581343232190333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902574476755823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047062659835482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963915088002042,0.06981195947765856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249640879783968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482603898984653,0.0,0.0,0.09617309147541593,0.13108817663820785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609121969958411,0.0,0.09348943988458493,0.08616677157033466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838887076198649,0.11385758256690275,0.0,0.0,0.090138544758128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506240229635766,0.0,0.07857377879789439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107949569142123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17132948143480975,0.09276753754888108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321679341752208,0.1624293513876088,0.0,0.17436606457878964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406342913635124,0.0,0.0,0.17964282468391146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177287260921875,0.0756012423905903,0.0,0.0,0.2182164887776087,0.052616521212083614,0.0,0.06519081274904773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846521400765345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604305077860215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550835281393264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167941439059832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333309762814733,0.0,0.0,0.10575983070402263
mentalhealth,ifeeltrappedandalone,2020/03/20,"Trapped and addicted I feel so alone in this place. I’m sure no one will see or care but if by any small chance you do, thank you. quite frankly I have no one else. I’m all alone. I feel so trapped. I’m so trapped. I can’t leave this place as much as I want to. I don’t have anyone to feed my cat and I don’t want to make anything else suffer because of my mistakes and inability to get better. 


Shit never gets better. It doesn’t ever feel like it will. I’m alone and I’m sure that’s how it will stay for a long time. The world doesn’t need me I know this I’m not anymore special then the person next to me. I’m not even sure how many people would miss me. I have so much I want to say but I just can’t i don’t know why. No one gives a shit about me. They never did. 

I don’t wanna die, i don’t wanna die. I just wanna feel better.",-2.048703181635119,-0.2186269999999979,0.4959424083769655,104.59121929118004,96.4869109947644,3.357309706000805,13.10531614981877,4.713530739802397,-1.6247335481272651,637,11,171,2,26,214,92,191,0.295,0.5529999999999999,0.153,-0.9892,0,6,0,0,0,2,20.0,0,2,1,4,11,15,2,0,4,0,18,4,2,3,7,37,43,17,2,10,8,0,4,1,0,4,1,1,0,1,7,4,1,0,6,0,0,0,16,5,0,3,1,6,24,10,16,38,3,13,0,2,1,0,6,5,2,2,8,101,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261803599937125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3494810381219549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764891550530847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154832854176956,0.07864749814254013,0.0,0.09256012248302767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856577610741549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29843395841338943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467920410897545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23346959958254354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18792250618878836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429090879756889,0.10174313369348148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274897929261724,0.08035457673137147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175306217453208,0.10789951067995196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363035153017315,0.0,0.0,0.11909836320911578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0549512546818585,0.0,0.0,0.09953982629787242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750801916712948,0.11403542255141225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536910160274762,0.08340129313102028,0.17350052056056933,0.0,0.11962203255179013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286547825735157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797834594058661,0.0982117824155674,0.23503193338083905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963460174978595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944732186578623,0.0,0.0,0.08963070577228549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309148802322786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119886986736357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180286244271652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355497982240286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558704756654474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990279871874308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149424253312528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990141357708999,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Layahlouis,2020/03/21,"For those that lost your jobs due to the Coronavirus outbreak, how are you coping. I am willing to send prayers..",3.78142857142857,6.300728333333336,3.1145238095238104,91.43464285714286,75.19047619047619,6.104761904761905,29.54761904761905,7.1686216300943375,1.6253619047619041,89,4,17,1,2,26,20,21,0.10800000000000001,0.892,0.0,-0.3182,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,3,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,13,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6726600198533709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7399516860517737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hellowhatup11111,2020/03/21,"I force myself to read the same sentences over and over again.... In addition to other mental health problems, I feel like my mental illness is taking away one of my favourite hobbys: reading. Whenever I read a book I like, I often force myself to read the same sentences over and over again. Strangely this doesnt happen when I have to read books or texts for my university lessons, and it feels like the more I care and want to fully understand what I am reading, the more this problem occurs. Is there anything I can do about this?",8.349405940594059,7.3017774059405935,7.476118811881187,77.44091089108912,62.069306930693074,9.664158415841584,35.05148514851485,8.238735603445708,2.7020439603960402,422,15,77,4,5,130,62,101,0.105,0.752,0.142,0.2225,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,5,0,7,2,0,0,0,16,14,6,0,3,1,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,4,8,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,14,4,14,14,4,9,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,2,6,61,20,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004143770356772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563579335173586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13633802717975574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13522726204836838,0.1910613969034698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824952060263323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421397492111913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959887770216189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695197313913306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906131796184694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559069181113201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.802546391568284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005419599725056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920884426657984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887243183430345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cantfindusername420,2020/03/21,"I don't feel in control of myself Lately I've lost control over my actions, all I do is lay in my bed watching YouTube or scrolling through Instagram, sometimes I feel motivated to get up and do something but when I try to it's almost like my body doesn't let me. It's like I'm only in control of the thing I want to do is comfortable, if it's something like studying I just can't make myself do it. I don't know what to do.",0.7027956989247315,2.5160192795698957,2.90451612903226,92.64344086021505,82.01075268817203,5.423655913978496,26.46236559139785,6.42735559955562,0.8966043010752691,335,15,76,3,9,114,55,93,0.019,0.7959999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.9285,0,0,2,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,5,2,5,0,0,1,0,12,1,1,5,1,16,20,5,0,2,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,3,4,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,3,13,4,12,18,1,8,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,3,5,51,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19475329411065728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160341605985064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6544100529184008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966796252433237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161281674288723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688642727608444,0.0,0.21939280063665806,0.0,0.0,0.1988788478857492,0.0,0.2850534620949566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21230843167791688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12982335401658612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791814560415278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994552744959672,0.19235524050044767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921028379844382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204570815994626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471503674792892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,belowgrayskies,2020/03/21,"I can’t help it I want to cut soo bad, I am craving it. It started about 3 days ago and it’s just getting worse. Every time I am alone be it for a minute or hours my anger and feelings get so intense I can’t think straight. I don’t know what to do, and I don’t have anyone to talk to. If you’ve been there and have advice let me know",-0.4001098901098885,0.8418997948717966,1.7659706959706971,102.24807692307694,83.1025641025641,4.457142857142856,18.83516483516484,3.1291,-0.9488373626373624,256,6,70,0,7,86,53,78,0.18899999999999997,0.71,0.1,-0.8298,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,2,0,1,0,12,0,0,0,0,12,20,7,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,1,9,0,6,17,0,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,5,43,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666528345441441,0.2418895297136814,0.0,0.0,0.2826189001317137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19080236406473589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22784139959607524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598347871327094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299111488308776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797511464459733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28513456891358885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829041046326033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687294709996417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29993278742775664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790358361062938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193144171215295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21932868009771067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17484894907084028,0.0,0.0,0.15911712417148274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609502796964676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780855890617287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRA189,2020/03/21,"If I just end it, will the pain stop I haven’t thought about it for over two years but it’s getting to that point where I think about it everyday. If I end my life, will it all stop. I don’t want to cause pain to those I love but I can’t deal with it anymore, it’s all too much",-0.5790256410256411,0.7358818923076953,1.161153846153848,106.0330128205128,83.92307692307693,4.94871794871795,16.98717948717949,5.46131890053228,-1.086897435897436,213,4,62,1,6,69,40,65,0.16899999999999998,0.72,0.111,-0.4118,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,1,2,14,10,4,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,9,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,8,1,8,7,3,9,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,2,6,42,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254949423772452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335767996173446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23441368243621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4027735942500927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879407394302174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16060171516831326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20521485108996892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16714681665052958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4838861477988978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21494290709189248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38019142956619456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456927447550268,0.0,0.18051038387613014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22211237538467604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411168979098134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642207110185576
mentalhealth,Arbuzek,2020/03/21,"Help, please Hey, there is a confesion/question
I do not fucking know what to do. My GF and i am meeting for more that 4 months. She has a lot of mental health problems and cut herself in the past.

 Lately she was kicked form university and after that she started having simmilar suicidal thoughts. Although she knows that i f-ing love her, she still denies this. Since after she was kicked out of uni we havent met due to coronavirus (big distance and no possibility of comming to her without public transport).

What to do anons, i started to panic that if i do anything, she'll do sth to herself. I have tried talking bout it, telling to go to psychologist or even talking to her family( not that supportive btw).

Im thorn between letting go and not to be sucked by that, or saying psychologist or i leave.

Help.

Ps: i need to go to sleep, sleep this through and talk to GF",5.275802139037432,5.977065735294119,5.8466844919786105,80.67098930481286,68.11764705882352,8.53475935828877,33.101604278074866,8.575989854853784,2.5777647058823527,685,30,133,10,11,222,106,170,0.11800000000000001,0.8009999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.6495,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,0,0,3,7,3,1,3,0,16,5,2,0,0,22,30,11,1,3,8,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,11,8,0,0,3,0,0,4,6,5,0,0,4,1,22,2,25,23,3,16,0,0,0,2,27,3,2,5,9,97,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553539869288596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007576330386742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381027333255192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102973238526825,0.0,0.0,0.2600925169421315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621531893776339,0.0,0.0,0.20450168628839144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647798453507035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676746427461541,0.0,0.17208269751972874,0.1615280977168974,0.0,0.15599239594226294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12969229317119468,0.13768205324513386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373420977538382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176370899086825,0.0,0.0,0.11311366389586056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17898419525545214,0.0,0.0,0.14562594266496612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674537523407741,0.0,0.17197685706422192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14596945325229393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12131363821921627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619068188176708,0.0,0.305319723741708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215950914768377,0.0,0.12182638133322088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686460356741142,0.17311158303488114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36784099259132025,0.13333515497659834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211074157261503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357122745198093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14705245963594166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AyFaydo,2020/03/21,"A real crazy mental problem. I have something very specific and weird that I can’t find any other cases of or any information on it. Basically positive emotions I feel become neutralized when I become aware of them to the point where I don’t feel them anymore. It happens at a much faster rate than could be seen as natural mood changing or burnout from something. For example if I build up an emotional image or good feeling while listening to music it gets drained away and I’m just left feeling depressed and empty and getting nothing out of continuing listening.

Another thing this happens with which is actually terrifying is sleep. When I build up sleepy feelings that are supposed to help me lull myself into unconsciousness, they just go away, and sometimes it physically hurts my brain. Ever since this started happening I have been unable to go to sleep without the help of medication. It’s terrifying and the though that medication could eventually lose its potency and effect and I’ll be forced to stay awake by my own horrendously dysfunctional brain for who knows how long actually makes me want to kill myself.

I honestly don’t know what to do or what treatment to undergo. I’ve told my doctor and she’s given me antipsychotic medication but it hasn’t made my emotions stable or anything really other than allow me to go to sleep. I just want to know that someone else has gone through what I’m going through and has found a way past it. Please if you can help me identify this or know how to get into contact with someone who might know about it that would mean the world to me. Or any other advice you might have would be appreciated as well.",7.654789644012943,8.069191323624597,7.8694012944983855,69.21860032362464,62.94822006472492,11.00906148867314,36.260517799352755,10.746095033038511,4.052224595469255,1345,59,229,32,18,439,175,309,0.081,0.8029999999999999,0.11699999999999999,0.8889,0,0,2,0,0,1,16.0,0,2,3,3,12,10,1,0,8,0,24,9,5,6,1,60,59,28,1,9,14,0,5,0,0,4,4,2,0,0,27,15,0,0,15,0,0,5,5,6,1,0,7,8,28,3,41,43,2,29,0,3,1,0,16,13,0,11,9,162,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.16796306872752162,0.0,0.0,0.08409622381213172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755699753320306,0.0902407568144926,0.0,0.0,0.08534777371082103,0.0,0.0,0.07081953169176555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617112286893521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19009163347256586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19214144483451465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910394061424299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374228141177168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412281232826133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808541546881142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189156369727814,0.29041563588147823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784563036145799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217571025290108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786567083209878,0.0,0.0,0.0943596611097296,0.0,0.0,0.1348874121191643,0.0,0.1956381008933505,0.0721825194682645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283060594249967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730513520957292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921283392997218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09521194606797727,0.0,0.2364799052599747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935037611604332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615983745470542,0.0,0.09627842585902424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143146007466907,0.057445300101715766,0.0,0.0,0.09374388695782596,0.0,0.2600872948168332,0.08672760715032732,0.18259079095747344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326354167229002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257628994832593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215340986756466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446734900499866,0.08135392484561578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234719790806179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979544078861597,0.055131838367633135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711892031075196,0.0,0.25836457377904914,0.0,0.14583565585895306,0.13250542046745115,0.08511492096617843,0.0,0.06091326753866245,0.09172784163247563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057174023774498775,0.0,0.08455289755836201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223341941344704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100799603940777,0.10152009647389357,0.06830992498405401,0.0,0.0,0.0773777121301265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295816505922175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226821960131218,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChaosAgent039,2020/03/21,"Why do I feel this way? I feel dead inside, I don’t exactly care what happens to me. It’s like I’m just living my life on auto pilot an just observing what happens and what does happen all I can think is oh this is what we’re doing now. I’m surrounded by people but feel lonely if that makes sense. Like I’m not really connecting with anyone. I put up a facade when I’m around people so that everything seems like it’s okay because when I think about trying to explain myself and how I feel I can’t so I gave up on things like therapy and trying to talk to someone I’m comfortable with which is no one. Once I realized that I tried my best to become apathetic(Figured if you don’t have any emotions you cant feel the way you feel) and find hobbies that can take my mind away from it so I began reading a lot and trying thrill seeking activities like Muay Thai, going to the gym even as far as to join the military but I’m getting bored. Truthfully I joined the military in hopes that it’ll kill me if I get deployed. (I chose the front lines) because I refuse to kill myself. I realized theirs a bunch of people out there who want to live but unfortunately have their lives taken from them if I could change places with them I would without hesitation. But I do all of this to keep me busy so I won’t have to think about it, but when I’m not doing something the thoughts just keep reappearing. But the thoughts only just started to resurface In February this year and I’ve been dealing with this since 15, but everything has it’s breaking point an I’m finally reaching mine I guess. Everything that happened in my past is just water under the bridge to me or at least I made myself think so or feel that way(That’s way to much to explain). But is there any advice that can be given to me on how I feel if this group does that here.",3.050336879432624,4.576017686170211,4.236297872340426,87.0136666666667,74.26595744680851,7.353758865248227,24.50141843971631,8.021203637495839,1.252488226950355,1454,45,305,22,30,476,185,376,0.079,0.794,0.127,0.9390000000000001,0,2,1,0,0,2,24.0,0,3,4,1,23,16,2,0,13,1,26,2,0,4,4,73,72,33,3,9,23,0,8,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,28,12,1,3,20,2,0,3,9,4,0,1,8,8,44,12,43,59,7,33,0,1,0,0,15,17,0,11,14,205,72,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850486648203735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183722748985948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060856230296663726,0.0,0.0,0.07747875538230363,0.0,0.0,0.08177135347489536,0.0,0.0,0.10611029619022012,0.09612226856037076,0.0,0.0,0.09133686424117993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873701287795993,0.0,0.09207048292382897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948960563722796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972828226727217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15232816456633158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790159000820016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05748516814278504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23466177219223264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3520562396877372,0.0,0.0,0.09534154585183197,0.07954754349981319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094339620162144,0.0,0.049463455416688604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587781663840124,0.0,0.3078556863286205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644444812818902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547197224147292,0.1925805588160716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06147472230061455,0.2126021989885128,0.0,0.23055797787376414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07399323559841732,0.0,0.0823537210088744,0.05809590314983665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787957828446283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06398003985358659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268842108168596,0.05897652366727917,0.06619331572672515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830838473233482,0.18101535169418614,0.0,0.0909320563444468,0.0,0.08227530764607875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749325762610757,0.0,0.0,0.08705760106809192,0.0,0.05575624005109512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923252890998353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719954642368555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374366678886572,0.06700306257148009,0.0,0.0,0.0616031474324307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06543877288977175,0.06995467132766231,0.0,0.0,0.09953101945913116,0.0,0.057821554452816434,0.22307161578300985,0.0,0.13819062529354406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363616232448209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05133493673169301,0.2763343061325693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853469141748119,0.0,0.0,0.08389771685821103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06182649086768921,0.0,0.0,0.0560470736581733
mentalhealth,cookster1015,2020/03/21,BPD help Anyone with borderline personality disorder please explain your mood switches i feel as if i might have it but to scared of judgement from family and friends to go to a doctor my mood switches maybe a good 50 to 60 times a day for no reason and i get very bad thoughts like harming myself when those switches happen i need help but i am so scared,3.6470476190476178,5.686534657142857,4.300000000000002,85.01333333333334,73.85714285714286,6.9523809523809526,27.380952380952376,7.793537801064563,1.6502380952380948,286,11,55,4,6,91,54,70,0.24600000000000002,0.5489999999999999,0.205,-0.695,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,0,0,2,9,0,2,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,12,10,8,0,2,3,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,1,1,8,3,9,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,2,4,33,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14650909688730496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494981182222158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638972294326056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513029914356725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24014092452965904,0.21446407644164675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19752738104872888,0.0,0.10594527766251292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16188329640944252,0.0,0.10947141139380084,0.0,0.1190814177397677,0.17574484142013005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852877608247956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28088871244396163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236636748027332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21050226768140728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22227950643718933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15536474044874846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18295457433774828,0.0,0.2300023522670584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154329856827307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195545970756727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634437929651916,0.12217933606818265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288519568776675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bubbles1638,2020/03/21,I think im bipolar So I was watching a video about it and I relieved I have some of the symptoms. I get depressed for months then out of know where I'm happy and full of energy I don't sleep for days I'm running around then I randomly get depressed I sleep all day cry all night I get sucidal thoughts. I don't want to tell anybody because I don't want to look dumb so can somebody tell me if I should tell somebody.,0.8399999999999999,2.799921666666666,2.4700000000000024,95.165,82.33333333333334,5.333333333333334,25.555555555555557,6.42735559955562,0.7345555555555556,330,14,75,3,9,108,55,90,0.18,0.722,0.098,-0.7222,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,2,0,7,4,2,0,2,15,18,7,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,1,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,2,13,2,10,15,4,11,0,2,2,0,3,4,1,3,6,45,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16623546274490242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138331023913735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20512175468753574,0.2408597495227079,0.0,0.3216724971013719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926870238797591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19878493974517605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20170793409856327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026257359237684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15681199456304631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905164000156548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523996365978675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3737435885099345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19409117583702407,0.0,0.0,0.4896489360540584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11965348788827945,0.0,0.14824826773047664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22028456498727894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GentleNakama,2020/03/21,"Seeking Help for a Friend Hi!   
I'm looking for help in getting online resources and potential coping mechanisms for my friend. He's in high school, and he's just turned 18. We have a venting channel in our discord and he posts almost every day about wanting to die, he's having panic attacks, public outbursts, crippling anxiety, terrible self worth... the poor kid is just falling apart. I've been pushing him for months to get professional help, and he finally sought out a therapist in his area but things didn't go well, he sort of gave up before he walked in. He's from a conservative Vietnamese Catholic family but is closeted bisexual, so struggling with his sexuality as well, believing that he's going to hell. He's self isolated long before the outbreak and now any efforts he was hopefully going to make to make irl friends are quashed, I'm really concerned.   


I've been trying to offer him coping mechanisms and hobbies, things for him to put his energy into besides self hatred, but he shoots down every suggestion, usually with ""That's too much effort "" or "" I'll just mess that up too ,"" and I could really use some help getting him the help he needs. Community, hobbies, professional consultation, anything so that I don't lose my friend. I see a lot of myself in high school in him and I keep thinking back to when I tried to kill myself. I'm terrified to see him in that same position, I just wanna take all the pain away from him. If anyone has any advice or resources, it'd be incredibly helpful. I want to do something for him.",6.119956592512209,7.100153247422682,6.7652884789292855,73.83792729245798,66.35395189003437,9.837655995659253,33.5288478929282,9.93914555978268,3.4386522336769767,1229,53,214,27,19,404,166,291,0.18,0.698,0.12300000000000001,-0.9679,0,0,1,1,0,1,39.0,2,0,0,3,15,16,3,2,9,0,15,1,0,3,1,41,39,18,2,7,10,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,4,8,13,0,2,1,1,2,7,2,9,2,0,5,3,24,7,40,31,5,34,1,1,3,0,46,18,1,8,8,127,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962976133527396,0.0,0.0,0.09867917691487413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402876557726334,0.0,0.07538710922462279,0.0,0.0,0.0689053702088167,0.0,0.0810946267446067,0.0,0.0,0.11210983900337354,0.09258682892772888,0.07577547847293825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16771008352558958,0.11102713771480932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868063760696609,0.0,0.0,0.06355375527348886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022747676129687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660578253626986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290001513018699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795188070598437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30454432405098786,0.0,0.15445801570615927,0.0,0.16801719515057173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39631820404947415,0.2082376599244244,0.0,0.09787800972444168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759185131597555,0.10902609835964236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720974911554487,0.08275347911933233,0.11024731203501707,0.0,0.08377993949021609,0.0,0.0,0.13155989763547726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865815247705864,0.0,0.07244234995488898,0.07307030884404665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485945936518028,0.11562202102797987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437943796513752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906553984880702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626166108034412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19946680325050864,0.15705615840756826,0.0,0.3084136377541171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586521230621564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302125077046248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409402209107252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441902934559248,0.1309386268652593,0.06314403715805691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13381197844039072,0.10718930754648263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851117523756665,0.10853404872040376,0.0,0.11624948843857028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17720864664440705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rachelm2424,2020/03/21,"Help maybe? Dear redditors,
Can anyone recommend a free therapy/mental health service?",7.543846153846157,11.760339153846154,6.91423076923077,57.06826923076926,80.53846153846155,11.830769230769231,37.269230769230774,10.125756701596842,6.907184615384615,71,4,7,3,2,22,13,13,0.0,0.379,0.621,0.8875,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3985911353147769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6059348529615981,0.0,0.0,0.3820914645193131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5726902946238659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Echo4117,2020/03/21,"Need help on what kind of help to get My girlfriend sometimes imagines fully fledged conversations, but what I see is a nod and a grunt.

The issue is that she recalls fully fledged conversations, that usually include a greeting, a query, and a reply to the query. Based on double checking with the other parties, I don't think I'm the one imagining things. She currently acknowledges this could be problem but is pretty hostile and upset when this is brought up in the wrong setting. Not sure is this related but she talks to herself aloud in the bathroom sometimes.

We are wondering what kind of doctor should we visit about this issue. A psychiatrist, a psychologist, a family doctor, or the University clinic.

I'm in Canada.",7.754751908396948,8.60480473282443,7.730601145038168,68.80368797709926,62.74045801526717,10.21412213740458,37.74904580152672,10.125756701596842,4.136106106870229,584,28,91,12,8,188,82,131,0.121,0.772,0.107,-0.4576,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,2,0,0,0,2,7,1,1,15,0,10,3,0,0,1,21,18,8,0,4,5,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,11,6,0,0,5,0,1,2,2,4,0,1,1,1,9,3,13,14,1,12,0,0,1,0,13,6,0,2,3,69,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458680340591834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3739945646205599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17222969949482214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545121383944807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449147975276228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3813746931080189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38049991602948224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13546690295548358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379966016647108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18586769609908532,0.0,0.17481557114442595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558520215761028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.361382388219878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218898806385,0.0,0.0,0.1468442695313803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137522435096107,0.11706433555884538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012140317725037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19812621452754856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19974959332303688,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IXBlackHeartXI36,2020/03/21,"Could we have some professionals over on the anxiety sub-reddit? I've noticed quite a few people ask stuff there, and I have too several times, but nobody there really seems to be able to offer much help to each other. Even I can't. Everyone there would probably appreciate an expert's opinion on their problems.

[https://www.reddit.com/r/Anxiety/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Anxiety/)",10.015762711864411,13.582516677966108,7.812000000000001,60.07155932203392,60.1864406779661,10.143728813559322,28.749152542372883,10.355215969177356,3.5921972881355924,320,10,42,8,5,94,51,59,0.08199999999999999,0.8,0.11800000000000001,0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,1,1,5,1,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,10,8,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,6,5,4,4,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,3,1,32,6,1,0.2436272061297281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3727482917045095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277585504759229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19451649996839984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16091347194578154,0.0,0.0,0.23279623587150775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16329818082765624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17909402861096527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27737118892894536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16890042920432882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626713339434165,0.2331183336932737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591275223845276,0.0,0.0,0.15607382667785105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217890584625551,0.0,0.27522939719939865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788948637201503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14206098309233772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306577722853353,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pee_pee-poopoo,2020/03/21,"Am I okay? Without going into too much detail, I often have short depressive episodes, and recently I've found myself doing the one thing that helps while I can't visit my loving girlfriend due to coronavirus (she's immunocompromised so she can't go out and I can't go in). This is essentially submerging my face in the sink and holding my breath, so I can experience the feeling of asphyxiating and dancing on death's door, and I'm getting closer and closer to blacking out each time but I can't seem to stop myself. 

Is this behaviour considered suicidal or otherwise dangerous or stupid, and what else can I do to try and feel better in those periods?",5.476388888888892,7.041098879032263,6.6268817204301085,72.09087813620073,68.2741935483871,10.027240143369175,31.51971326164875,10.25414643259724,3.5146928315412183,527,22,91,14,9,177,83,124,0.149,0.768,0.083,-0.9109,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,2,0,3,1,12,3,2,0,0,23,22,14,2,0,4,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,6,12,0,2,4,1,0,5,5,3,0,1,1,3,14,3,13,21,2,21,0,1,1,1,6,10,0,4,6,67,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163073312000584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106526918188776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20431161387714675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392419647578979,0.0,0.0,0.24732964494753626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681646309351232,0.0,0.0,0.12778070863235222,0.0,0.41699401926029295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639339361114282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22073911790192666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17979128056076862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16573082382298945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24148899767600054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226525314362632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204476236370245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675261192898204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16248522731270715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142614057352939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16605084576321213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23576224685982225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Melodicampibianz,2020/03/21,"Is art childish and meaningless? im japanese artist.

My mom said art is childish and meaningless and I need to grow up (I'm 26) so 2 days ago I deleted all my art of deviantart and abandoned my 1,200 followers.

My art;

https://imgur.com/a/zlxTycC

https://imgur.com/a/vSw3bu2

https://imgur.com/a/UMKRfEZ

https://imgur.com/a/x352wBR

https://imgur.com/a/rZmHjjy

https://imgur.com/a/HcwwC6n

I liked making art because it help me cope with stress and stress of worsening neurological condition .

i feel angry, upset and very conflicted with myself. I feel compelled to make art, but then i get extremely angry at myself, calling myself stupid and childish and my inner voice tells me that art is stupid and that i must hate art.",8.739324324324325,12.88949277477478,5.558040540540541,71.68949324324329,67.1981981981982,9.105405405405406,30.871621621621625,9.516144504307137,3.763491891891892,602,24,79,15,12,165,68,111,0.315,0.647,0.038,-0.9867,1,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,0,0,1,8,3,3,0,0,4,1,0,3,2,22,14,12,0,2,1,1,2,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,11,0,2,2,9,0,2,0,7,0,0,1,4,17,1,8,12,1,8,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,4,45,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20868651445626574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435104581837584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403911654640377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182707088658146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380718652102625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299775729854832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324295008647722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15779773568828107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542950814277187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501481037437015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142906948327129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27572223312488325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17456169053785714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22393928449195072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5393479265141154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20576833301298406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942469825589564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,interstellar_me,2020/03/21,"I come from a country where therapy isn't really a thing I'm 18(M) and I'm glad I've found this subreddit. Starting from last summer I finished high school and i've been having some really bad days, it's like one moment I'm in a good mood, the next moment I'm feeling down and extremely hopeless.
Here are some weird things I've noticed about myself recently:
- I obsess over something for like 3 days and then completely forget about it.
- Short memory loss (I don't think this is the right word for it though)
Example: If I want to do something I have to do it immediately or I'll forget to do it in seconds.
- I don't eat so much
- I used to draw everyday but I can't do it anymore
- I have no energy but sometimes I feel like I have so energetic.
- I live with my family but sometimes I feel like I want to run away and live alone.
- Showering feels so tiring and difficult lately
- I feel like my family hates me
- I don't have any life goals whatsoever because I don't really know what I want in life.
Also, I had some really bad things happening in my life while growing up.
P.S: Sorry for my English, as you may have noticed i'm not a native speaker I wanted to share this here because I can't really share it with anybody else.",1.646309523809521,3.780046059523812,3.9340571428571423,84.81094285714286,80.46825396825399,7.524063492063492,22.77841269841269,8.488131031819089,1.5903363174603171,965,32,197,22,25,333,131,252,0.127,0.7240000000000001,0.149,0.5297,1,1,2,0,0,1,30.0,0,1,0,2,10,18,1,1,6,0,22,5,0,1,0,35,44,19,0,5,6,0,5,5,0,1,4,1,1,0,14,9,1,0,8,0,0,3,9,8,0,2,3,6,29,9,24,40,4,29,0,2,0,0,3,12,0,6,19,124,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837448735156488,0.0,0.08367980201572031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115813502825627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377380975175797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831182203762732,0.0,0.17473845427308626,0.1275739744067651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013726708290427,0.109712041986363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349670477028059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107071860487126,0.0874124904435772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19728874745026576,0.0,0.26454321189971425,0.2242624519994112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473130574465032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776626169632032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253195697960068,0.0,0.0,0.10330938793579664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055689022464586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05750687951559525,0.0852947831103735,0.11803739421669522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217289442501176,0.2556067456824451,0.0,0.184796377760333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692173389275257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128480552265516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382644798353977,0.0,0.0,0.07090612118772792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33517224042728905,0.0,0.10331842767526392,0.0,0.0,0.08936116792304058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590029430042096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611124894863259,0.2069813711909451,0.11713483770158008,0.07406405067263802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966386095460488,0.0,0.20855258460590892,0.06704847131837605,0.1028073249445388,0.0,0.0,0.12026718278385408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037453328700347,0.0,0.0,0.24687526620571296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spaghettificati0n,2020/03/21,i feel like i’m not even a real person i know my illnesses “shouldn’t define me” but i have no sense of self so i can only identify with what’s happened to me and the choices i’ve made to cope with it. i am nothing but my trauma and substance abuse. i don’t think about much else. i’m not ok unless i’m high. i’m really really really tired and that’s the best way i can describe how i feel about my existence rn. i’m not going to kill myself atm but i’m really fucking tired of being alive. also i’m 105-110lbs at 20 years old and i feel so much fucking fatter than i was at 120-125lbs at 16 years old. i feel disgusting. i hate being in this body. i hate they way it looks and i hate what’s happened to it and i hate the way i treat it and the substances i put in it.,-1.244598003152916,0.7272358092485547,1.8005176037835011,96.159767472412,92.64161849710982,4.995165528113505,15.378087230688383,6.574015621080383,-0.41262774566474025,597,13,144,8,22,210,90,173,0.248,0.635,0.11699999999999999,-0.9825,0,0,0,0,1,1,12.0,0,0,1,1,7,13,8,0,5,1,9,6,1,2,0,26,33,15,1,1,7,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,2,9,9,0,0,6,0,1,2,6,9,0,0,2,5,24,4,17,28,3,15,0,0,1,2,3,6,2,0,5,86,33,0,0.0,0.14276921482740132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636138957587066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12645414408053532,0.0,0.0,0.13384497818604013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065976307936544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958711737274801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437075699269128,0.08608306498421009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227950285431056,0.0,0.0,0.06848120931179312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21311015896175106,0.0,0.0,0.4758632758646285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273116727407229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13331205277276184,0.0,0.06622198770563414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058868736793376765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118711337440424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11401715384629105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771582864189495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562009997685133,0.0,0.252882616759773,0.0,0.0,0.09164338138402828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052133131900836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113274413179345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13715194083020996,0.3087737978038128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570462721225456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720959789033519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769871002144638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28693467680649865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15519220605052525
mentalhealth,Fastbermicelli,2020/03/21,"Is there a big difference between a trigger and a cause for a mental illness? There have been evidence that certain things tend to ‘cause’ bipolar manic episodes and depressive episodes to develop, like stress, loss or even change in sleep patterns. However, most people who get stressed and other things don’t get bipolar episodes. So is it wrong to say that these things caused it? Should the word ‘trigger’ be used instead? Why do people use these terms synonymously?",7.299999999999998,9.446850296296292,5.408333333333335,80.33250000000002,64.55555555555556,8.362962962962964,36.95679012345679,8.841846274778883,3.3952864197530865,378,19,61,6,6,108,59,81,0.191,0.758,0.051,-0.9104,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,5,7,0,2,5,0,8,4,1,7,1,15,13,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,11,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,0,2,6,10,2,3,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,2,2,40,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5364507337957365,0.18414202296750026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14992545743117586,0.0,0.0,0.1818651567377354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497099630939045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188783658228488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504136779965023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542070741110455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24135518782726034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13842673186483748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741948067498684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3987911229985957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34693131837515595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3006796203465626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570702845417632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903172307940996,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rei_Sunny,2020/03/21,"When should you see a therapist? Hello everybody. I just want to hear some opinions about when you should go see therapy. I've been considering it for a bit now, but I'm not sure if this is just temporary and a ""I'm having a bit of a rough time atm"" thing, or actually something serious. Basically, I'm not sure if I should go if it's just something minor in the end. So what so you think? When is therapy appropriate?",2.002147058823532,4.034643494117649,4.518455882352941,81.59180147058824,78.76470588235293,8.955882352941178,25.919117647058826,9.516144504307137,2.50714705882353,327,13,69,10,8,115,54,85,0.08900000000000001,0.8959999999999999,0.015,-0.6933,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,3,0,0,10,3,0,0,6,0,7,0,0,0,2,20,17,11,0,7,10,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,1,0,0,1,4,5,2,5,13,3,9,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,6,6,46,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.19268405082664655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4311315051326067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17488330388934684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22443232349675574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22254204017123252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3146863496854875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040154167887388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721911520319886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4516056908890548,0.22925625486065696,0.13117791412588434,0.12651886280134678,0.0,0.0,0.11513547956322265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646193164424215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jogurtperson,2020/03/21,"Should I see a professional or can I blame it on adolescence hormones? I'm 18F and have been struggling with negative thoughts, sometimes suicidal for a while now, but in the recent couple of years, things have gotten a lot worse.

I was in therapy for a bit at the age of 13 for having awful mood swings that brought suicidal thoughts with them, but I was too young to get diagnosed with anything, so my therapist at the time wrote it off as just ""teenage hormones doing their thing.""  
My mood swings have gotten a lot worse and the thoughts of wanting to die depend on the month.  

I'm worried that I have over-dramatized this all in my head. I recently found out what borderline personality is and I checked all of the symptoms. From fear of abandonment, shifting self image, feeling either empty or feeling extreme emotion, etc etc.  
But... don't we all?

I guess I'm somewhat hoping for someone here to confirm my doubts for me and that this will all go away as I grow older.",6.633793611793614,6.976411632432432,6.468550368550371,78.64130221130223,65.10810810810811,9.538083538083539,35.737100737100725,9.339509955726095,3.222891891891892,772,35,143,13,11,243,115,185,0.242,0.725,0.033,-0.9927,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,2,0,5,7,0,3,11,1,14,3,1,1,4,37,33,13,3,3,7,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,10,9,0,1,6,0,1,3,2,4,0,0,11,3,17,1,29,20,11,23,0,1,1,0,6,10,0,9,10,107,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113522607304625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12713237767819008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14772833050364886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972286240468688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373413158362762,0.140435033078738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15221054057811348,0.0,0.0,0.3018227553778348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15226637306053376,0.13683810077109065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836530735701545,0.0,0.0,0.07069621390571346,0.0,0.07690231882040913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490641193749555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887166132423984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343977782022361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300790086987448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800670099618434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815135621008944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672133848419808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782809541377818,0.0,0.1411624796966418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465149223016058,0.0,0.13382944853023676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14146004041302074,0.0,0.2960240862193816,0.0,0.0,0.14064352189890114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474386345406815,0.15711050287390588,0.17979381253343987,0.0,0.0,0.3222736695644484,0.07890294249027491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981196699481365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13741838972634166,0.27579396441912624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713806771286715
mentalhealth,MedicineDeer,2020/03/21,"Rollercoaster I had a good day yesterday. Like, there was nothing particularly special about it - I just played boardgames with my little sister for the most part - but I felt happy. I was laughing a lot and genuinely felt really good for the first time in a long time. 

But I got up today feeling despondent, and as the day's progressed it's gotten much worse. I feel like crying. I can't eat. I want to go back to bed and stay there. I'm having suicidal thoughts again (I'm not going to do anything, but the thoughts keep popping into my head).

My mood flipped a complete 180 and I don't know why. There's nothing wrong right now. I just don't want to be here anymore.",2.277489878542511,4.51714438345865,3.305263157894739,89.58761133603242,78.84962406015038,6.197570850202429,25.26836321573164,7.321109707123232,1.1736297281665702,525,20,107,7,13,168,85,133,0.159,0.655,0.18600000000000005,0.4268,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,10,10,0,0,8,0,9,2,1,0,0,24,25,8,1,2,6,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,6,1,1,7,1,0,2,4,1,0,1,9,4,13,8,12,15,4,19,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,2,13,66,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15160903112568716,0.0,0.0,0.1258015308160542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11754997307326008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16028453063603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16792391550609498,0.1971809976434845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564273400784818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545944594033317,0.10921256897360103,0.2935642880852949,0.0,0.0,0.13003377574986194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376260468262053,0.2564453966397282,0.12226657857812888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16273625133766229,0.0,0.0,0.15689189843972948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358806301342867,0.0,0.0,0.08401505454292453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493721437222225,0.15321900149534176,0.0,0.13528787764658184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299672378138978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11237931397031116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933717136064493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16554666354068984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793441862251054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055278708067772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16294237790278646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721835264290258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427283212569966,0.17828306109014988,0.0,0.14490581822916282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18033702341601748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13794418954041762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579074320609151,0.0,0.16714272998269294,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Epitome_Of_Godlike,2020/03/21,"Do you ever feel like you're faking it? I sometimes feel like I fake everything that's wrong with me, but if I was faking it, it wouldn't eat at my soul and spirit. I constantly feel alone and like I have nobody. But is it because I don't want to talk to people or because I'm too scared to talk to them. I feel so scared amd confused all the time. I feel bad doing everything, and the things I feel good about, I can end up feeling bad about it. I want to feel better, and be happy, but that sounds so scary. It sounds dumb, but it scares me. I'm so used to my mental illnesses that not having them sounds terrifying. I'm scared of changes. Right now I'm a caterpillar who's afraid of being a butterfly.",1.7020374220374244,3.3716534864864904,3.2013513513513523,92.38772349272352,78.32432432432431,6.445738045738046,20.168399168399173,7.321109707123232,0.3432374220374221,548,13,124,7,13,180,81,148,0.33399999999999996,0.54,0.126,-0.9909,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,2,1,8,19,1,6,4,0,11,2,0,1,2,27,26,13,0,4,7,0,8,3,0,1,1,3,0,0,12,5,1,0,8,0,0,0,3,13,0,0,1,11,18,6,13,22,1,8,2,0,0,0,6,3,1,3,8,76,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13087499675708306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21101732700374012,0.15406064558913452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175869097059933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367635892298846,0.0,0.0,0.13655459460520156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12930192092691933,0.0,0.0,0.11192099901250026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430347434938573,0.0,0.0,0.22713563412807825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5111474900865921,0.1805489366573053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105988129638164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13451682993425929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18520520555963954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273451929576664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760488832474818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791416732794552,0.0,0.0,0.5060496418081568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497722916795136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20313319656360893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395062805214583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368386580031983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913792572314933,0.0,0.0,0.14906552480042784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381591993118889,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,neya327,2020/03/21,Just lost my best friend Any body else with bipolar depression that ruins all you’re relationships? I just want a friend before I end it all.,5.206666666666664,6.833583185185188,4.971296296296298,83.46583333333334,69.0,8.362962962962964,24.61111111111111,8.841846274778883,1.5921999999999992,114,3,22,2,2,35,23,27,0.242,0.435,0.32299999999999995,0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,6,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,3,3,1,1,3,1,0,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066826597672876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258621841241094,0.0,0.3189555333348556,0.0,0.0,0.337597448560737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26177425791279263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538943160130185,0.0,0.2691915572330068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4696307590448085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3317752370450427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32630682092093466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792656476659078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yonderlyworld,2020/03/21,"Painless ways to commit suicide? Hey people of reddit,I’m one of those meaningless teenage girls who cares about what everyone thinks about them.
I’ll give you my reasoning for killing myself first, all my life I’ve dealt with bullying because well,in a non “give me attention way” I’m really fucking ugly and I’m overweight.
Overall,I’ve felt like a waste of space my whole life.
Im in a couple of group chats cause I have no friends left and I had hope of gaining new ones and I became a target for their laughter,saying me not wanting to show my face is because I’m fat and treating me like meaningless garbage...which I am.
Im tired,I’m lonely and I’m no one,I’m just another number on the suicide counter soon.
So do me a favor,tell me painless ways to do it...please.
Also,sorry to ask but one more thing,any ideas on how to say goodbye without making anyone think I will do it? They’ll be happier if I’m gone anyway.",2.176262626262627,4.3360946149732635,3.416746880570411,89.06995692216282,78.78609625668449,6.080689245395128,25.36215092097445,7.1686216300943375,1.1822896019013664,731,28,146,9,18,237,125,187,0.14300000000000002,0.735,0.121,-0.6118,0,2,0,0,0,4,25.0,0,1,3,2,7,9,2,0,6,0,10,6,2,4,2,24,27,9,3,3,5,0,1,2,1,2,4,1,0,1,4,6,2,0,6,2,0,1,4,3,0,4,3,2,19,6,19,21,3,12,0,1,0,1,14,5,1,2,5,79,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334700944765317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788238351306141,0.13551131593910934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036221656924624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081473885448407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15755759957240054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176092466289027,0.13275715257037302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299306230369288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348698384474613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408325731536385,0.0,0.0,0.10992491328761643,0.0,0.0,0.09984454071371086,0.11947316254507452,0.0,0.2479427618690837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835681580816913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14588751648478646,0.27918608246317983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297637298541596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041125282397415,0.0,0.1825611656516602,0.12627273069295702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08626355192591176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12481334352174575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502845561182333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959339266996437,0.0,0.0,0.1418582382156018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827895092092181,0.1328723097883559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20554139574348065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466495960781958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827182831286608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858561859708603,0.16561365662622296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622454838074491,0.3077357112148369,0.0,0.0,0.11619534194140375,0.0,0.0,0.14428322801290436,0.0,0.12457530845157501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,King_Abalam,2020/03/21,"I always feel frustrated and irritable As the title says, I feel a near constant frustration and irritability with pretty much everything. If I have to wait in line at a store, if I get stuck behind a slow driver, if my computer is a bit slow, if someone asks me a question or if I throw something in the garbage can and miss, everything makes me feel like I want to scream. I hide it well and I'm not violent and I don't really snap at people. But I always feel like I want to. I always feel like there is a ton of pressure on me, even when there isn't. 

I assumed it was from drinking too much so I quit about 4 months ago but that has made things worse not better(not that I plan on going back to it). Any thoughts on what is wrong with me and why I always feel like I'm about to snap?",2.943363636363636,3.8919311696969743,4.361590909090912,88.28238636363638,73.66666666666667,7.6818181818181825,24.65909090909091,8.07648339933343,1.1594545454545448,613,18,138,9,12,204,94,165,0.15,0.746,0.10400000000000001,-0.8114,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,10,12,3,1,8,0,9,1,0,2,0,32,28,17,0,7,10,0,6,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,7,8,1,1,9,1,1,2,4,7,1,0,4,8,20,5,21,24,4,17,0,1,0,0,3,8,0,8,11,92,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114382610966501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42947308992626265,0.0,0.0,0.08774889144865056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206312230205224,0.0,0.0,0.0992207039489348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141218385936901,0.1408738704815244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944205385209182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264061362010219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852270480328253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319384376438262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3914668124775485,0.36873332048758295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741597395254954,0.0,0.0733341212501391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25216184849729706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220969645365151,0.08613251884317465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299528841488796,0.0,0.18971258520805373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945730160748988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13127598125585854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454982922772494,0.13724564842112405,0.0,0.0,0.08266375314692086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261459067401277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933176738598696,0.09933820177653344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572577167109352,0.0,0.0,0.102440154913744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15221752879723185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601884290427444,0.0,0.11643490197429048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149868779640236,0.0,0.14108058807035154,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,katysearra,2020/03/21,"I feel like i’m a monster... Please help me *trigger warning* ever since I broke up with my boyfriend (that was a very jealous and controlling relationship) I feel as though I am less than human. My friends tell me he was manipulative and I shouldn’t feel the way I do. He called me a cheater when I watched porn during our relationship which is fair that’s how some people view it during a relationship. I literally loathe myself bc of this decision and I also loathe myself since during the final days of our relationship I really did not want to be with him and I would think “oh that person would treat me better” and I know if my ex knew that he’d call me an emotional cheater so I cut it off and I wasn’t happy from our relationship since we argued all the time, like at least once a week if not every day. It was absolute torture, I loved him so much so it killed me when we’d argue about things that made me happy. Like creating love stories since i always had a passion for writing, he said i shouldn’t fantasize and also when i would play “The Sims” and he thought the male sims were too attractive to play with and that i was fantasizing about them or even when i’d read web comics such as “Hooky” where he thought Dorian was too attractive and that i’d fantasize about him too. Even though i told him that i wasn’t and that what he was saying was hurting my feelings bc i’d beg him to stop but he wouldn’t ever stop even if i was scream sobbing and begging him, which i know is immature and childish as he told me i couldn’t help how awful i felt when i felt as if i did nothing wrong. Now this was my first serious relationship, and his too, and we were only 17-18 during this relationship and I am now an 18 year old girl with girl hormones especially from being on the pill, but sometimes I feel like killing myself *im seeking therapy* due to what he’s told me and i feel like i’ve fucked up so so bad and he’s told me i’m abusive since i’ve grabbed things out of his hand hard during an argument said mean things while we were argument i’ve called him “immature” and “egotistical” and i feel like a fucking monster and I cannot escape how awful I feel and like I can never ever get into another relationship again since i’m so fucked up in the head and that there’s no point in living since i’m never gonna be happy permanently. It’s been about 20 days since we broke up now and every day I have something else to feel awful about, being a cheater, being abusive, never finding love again. and I can’t sleep and once i’m awake in the morning, even when i’m still tired my heart will start pounding and there is no way I can go back to sleep until nighttime, no naps and especially during this quarantine I have nothing to do to distract myself and I feel like i’m in hell and I live with so so much regret and sadness. Idk what to do every morning feels like i’m dying and slowly throughout the day I can somewhat forget it but little things will always remind me of him I can’t go a single day without thinking of him and either missing our good times (i lost my virginity to him and i regret that and now i can’t stop thinking about it) or i think about how i fucked up so bad. I don’t know if this is a result of manipulation as my friends and family have told me or if i’m really really awful. Please help me, i need help.",3.3924346168075346,4.564210387518144,4.715688551182449,85.31587267708247,72.84615384615384,7.668072512023678,25.26597228151057,8.124751697461798,1.3556244116224136,2643,81,558,39,51,878,256,689,0.22699999999999998,0.648,0.125,-0.9981,0,1,1,0,0,2,38.0,9,0,1,4,53,52,12,1,22,4,54,17,5,10,7,124,111,78,3,17,16,1,16,9,2,9,2,4,0,5,32,47,0,4,26,5,0,2,20,27,0,1,32,22,97,25,53,62,9,61,1,9,2,10,71,17,6,11,49,369,129,1,0.0,0.113598800032361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766729594927269,0.07977750814491924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0502678001682679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036861823024999366,0.08005345437949964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0423977945136652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14685200618414262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05376721430304431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18549858028033064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04975269651406535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040046547538913166,0.05392447073643515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266519682483206,0.13008962011566955,0.12117100994529742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0451922440578412,0.0,0.2666311526750195,0.23973140946370255,0.09205714430164913,0.05251439122513718,0.043815010371656776,0.040776547230483615,0.0,0.0,0.07407448427029559,0.1772738466501314,0.025045939022724777,0.0,0.054489220326590815,0.040208621828513966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15309458793722094,0.04294356798274823,0.0,0.0491988321489208,0.0,0.0,0.056807469809137874,0.1285289277715757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05131926097730874,0.0,0.051781912476323216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607391266488887,0.0,0.07903739978060713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21078339894597853,0.04804706942526026,0.0846613211618191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05233064296672644,0.0,0.12979936985969906,0.0453606608248919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052219187237976486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048077128291193,0.03554586321686147,0.11091960700558527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199675597341092,0.0,0.05030349478296653,0.10210608530070066,0.0,0.03645946420844064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033234588033626666,0.04185813496373078,0.0,0.1052443705003738,0.045317470524437485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047951571172514765,0.0,0.09213208084027337,0.0,0.0,0.4117449124969555,0.0,0.0,0.0912011696370046,0.038122697488166914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31724243122680224,0.0,0.095946437978744,0.0,0.0,0.036905475044733,0.0474124995124004,0.0,0.033931186620300736,0.0,0.03828382653277618,0.12023644419895108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041900447899563036,0.0,0.05482196505431554,0.0,0.12739309834559095,0.12286847247744068,0.09419885887812447,0.07611578452471743,0.05590676436960579,0.055098366701193315,0.0,0.2290369252291472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039554364139429116,0.028275427327718244,0.07610285595602041,0.03845345195019546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04621109807507095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021626144351261,0.0524133317214584,0.0,0.030870885581019126
mentalhealth,_thorne9,2020/03/21,"Extreme overthinking is the reason I'm suicidal I've never admitted to being suicidal or even having issues with mental health because some part of the mental health community deeply infuriates me. I don't know why and it's definitely misplaced anger. But here I am because I need to finally realize I have a problem.

My cycle is misplaced anger / insecurity / social media / extreme overthinking. 

I get so mad at everyone all the time. (I have reasons but that's a whole other story) I definitely struggle with anger issues and I let my temper get the best of me on most occasions. 
This mixed with insecurity often makes me say stupid shit to people and really stupid shit online. When I come out of my angry mood I re read things I've said or posted and it gives me so much anxiety. I just can't believe I allowed myself to say the things I did. I'll apologize or delete something but the thought of it never leaves me. I just over analyze and fixate on everything I've ever done and said that was embarrassing, stupid, awful etc. 

I try to do exercises of letting go, I delete social media entirely for months at a time, I try and talk to a close friend about it. Nothing really works and I never feel listened to. I always end up falling back into my cycle and the feelings of loneliness and like everyone would be better off without me in the world. 
I just can't focus on anything else but how much I hate myself and hate my personality and hate the way I act. I just don't know how to change and I know that this pushes people away.

It gets so bad that I'll lay in bed awake at night or before I get up for hours and just think about how stupid everything I've ever done was and how much I just want to end it. And every time I do something new it's just added to my mental list. I know people usually forget about the dumb shit you do bc everyone is focused on their own lives, but something about all of my mistakes and failures being archived online freaks me out and makes me spiral. Everything I've ever done is just stupid, embarrassing, and makes me a generally unpleasant person to be around. 

I also know this is an offshoot of my other issues that make me so angry and hard to open up. I just wish I could be a nice, happy, and lovable person to be around. But I'm not and at this point it I feel so lost and unliked that its too much work to want to undo",4.058571428571426,5.420099770700637,5.516884440400363,79.4779108280255,71.46284501061572,8.270330603579012,26.40831058538065,8.759644201051973,1.9730809948437973,1876,61,357,34,35,633,209,471,0.265,0.649,0.086,-0.9986,1,0,3,1,0,0,36.0,0,1,1,5,35,34,17,5,17,1,32,6,3,11,8,100,67,44,2,9,21,0,4,1,1,1,3,5,1,3,23,34,0,0,14,2,0,5,9,27,0,0,10,9,54,6,54,47,13,51,0,1,0,0,17,25,4,7,20,258,77,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0550860788769246,0.057316557693229325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05269565912471711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05668521915394276,0.12264176886836245,0.0,0.0,0.0647182791168832,0.052967129588755935,0.057514812673139515,0.08398143694811333,0.0,0.0586147518066377,0.07760807202701027,0.07228894255047813,0.06092182350177699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286956811984231,0.05933700229532675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05499783851239493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114750892977039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575432927350702,0.0,0.12202060150786558,0.0,0.07682326753855911,0.04549687633686909,0.1869271023884424,0.05803728681405978,0.1974632967717578,0.1857240393539763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448864279811497,0.0,0.0,0.07545846453144911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053219191097848284,0.0,0.14395506125554844,0.06607929252273602,0.03914805830779797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332772512009272,0.06170605096777671,0.20402447025946546,0.0,0.1464397958199634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783633357105884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21568931040530973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18928274354465865,0.0,0.0,0.0729376392152303,0.0,0.14087601174499453,0.0,0.03365297960789152,0.0,0.060825358068863924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751944347842402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18392098043248653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20825498138326345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054982121385777884,0.0,0.2025490786782664,0.05107621351431321,0.15938151496778333,0.06652807587639105,0.0,0.06464246185738383,0.0,0.0660955386292767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745940756216178,0.0,0.14326535586795372,0.18043914356573806,0.0,0.0,0.06511713574975987,0.0,0.06597131449323268,0.0,0.0,0.06591216926494205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890210184549292,0.0,0.08825701796027006,0.14164734086994415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104789113477167,0.10955778593800093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121236485119168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14043602758685314,0.0,0.15908956086381768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201194964283304,0.0,0.15069465219758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055365916694816816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915262213728259,0.04413774041826032,0.0,0.05468577367885892,0.12049950017032578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353469678335592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758654005123706,0.0,0.08125850001661597,0.05467648508272644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215660941793338,0.07690592423926816,0.07921258065060659,0.06640119829453375,0.0,0.1002959600160066,0.0,0.0,0.048932834333248285,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FiatLux831,2020/03/21,"Taking pills for no reason I used to be addicted to anxiety medication 6 months ago. I would take 4 or up to 6 pills a day. don’t even remember what it felt like to be completely honest because it really messed up my memory. 

Anyway I landed in the ER because I eventually took one too many (not a suicide attempt) and my liver was a mess. So I’m not on any medication anymore. Recently I’ve been craving them again but without a prescription I can’t get any. Instead I substitute my “craving” by taking random over the counter pills. Tylenol, Advil, sleeping aids, etc. Whatever I can get my hands on. And I usually double or on rare occasions triple the dose. 

I don’t know why I do it as they do not give me a high feeling per say. In fact sometimes all I get is a stomachache/headache. 

Has anyone else had this issue before?",3.037386759581881,4.906034585365855,4.951742160278748,80.42548780487809,75.09756097560975,8.34425087108014,29.397212543554005,9.04235418022936,2.6744822299651574,648,29,124,15,14,222,113,164,0.064,0.8959999999999999,0.04,-0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,2,1,6,4,0,0,9,0,14,12,3,2,2,19,27,7,1,1,7,0,3,1,0,1,9,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,8,2,1,1,5,4,18,2,16,19,4,17,0,0,0,0,4,10,0,3,7,82,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632678512059974,0.0,0.0,0.13275917714232574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036930356011172,0.0,0.11457114491071133,0.0,0.14852836092341856,0.10472038570676537,0.15345372205730434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18259282723116926,0.0,0.12744046349718596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570275757320331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658715634476844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251108922460907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16702950231333405,0.09891951819862778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572656289843023,0.0,0.14379955538008676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347408181863448,0.1436699023215855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823678183481926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631756422068666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230788266041451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316846334927878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518399658711911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017484652619773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195423816956022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148581790187286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594440758565648,0.15398515064227705,0.14787658612997728,0.0,0.16965651927351974,0.0,0.0,0.1191005215352905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14987489810064966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812313375703146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638205036332854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33781784562344164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663963569435144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293503758843176,0.1649469034107774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351411866378995,0.0,0.0,0.14436979133409303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106389993908564,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwagayhaimlonely,2020/03/21,"I can’t deal with university ending early My university is shutting early because of coronavirus. All exams will take place later this year but it will all be online. Since this is my last year of uni, most of my friends have decided they’re probably going home within the next week and might not come back at all. 

I kinda drifted away from my friends I had in school, because I hardly saw them during uni, so now that my uni friends are leaving I feel like I’m going to have no one around me anymore. Our grad ball, summer ball and graduation have all been cancelled because of the virus so it’s not even like I’m going to get to celebrate uni ending and say goodbye to everyone either. They’re all just going to anticlimactically disappear over the next week. 

None of them even seem remotely upset about the fact that we might not see eachother for a long time, and it just makes me feel like maybe our friendships have been more one sided than I thought. The one person I would consider to be my closest friend I’ve developed over uni, and the person I care about the most, says she’s excited to leave and can’t wait to move on with her life, even though by the sounds of it I might not be a part of her life for much longer. 

I’m just incredibly anxious that very soon I’m going to find myself completely alone.",6.85875274725275,6.328972073076925,6.9020879120879135,78.65576923076925,64.80769230769229,9.89010989010989,31.263736263736266,9.23628265651192,2.451104395604396,1049,33,208,16,14,336,144,260,0.065,0.78,0.156,0.9844,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,3,0,2,0,15,10,0,1,10,0,21,2,0,1,6,41,42,10,0,1,9,0,3,3,4,6,2,3,1,2,9,11,0,1,6,2,0,9,8,1,0,3,5,8,26,9,33,28,12,39,0,0,2,0,17,12,0,7,21,138,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540189837974012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496990040474843,0.10092741213576166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905959057468346,0.0,0.0,0.09561524053462997,0.07825400961158496,0.0,0.18611214800077105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376018581196116,0.0,0.0,0.08766490432826565,0.10670276541163666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491927707150356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18027409446848527,0.0,0.0,0.20165221482484724,0.0,0.0,0.09724455427033156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291483694774264,0.14540745861064178,0.0,0.0,0.09301493961462537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31450562822840794,0.0,0.053170054874558365,0.0,0.2891880827674339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116495349127647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208251399207036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829552441854457,0.0,0.21551716185151149,0.0,0.0,0.1437647809358426,0.14915744595607425,0.0,0.0,0.0900622824565734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793153736233064,0.0,0.10224054829782896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238821918237652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816424515199012,0.07481185818813699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164647796645595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206883740700505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020581171724536,0.0,0.0,0.1777213727901275,0.10632685005455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972409709845844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16186144313238887,0.0,0.10299556963095856,0.08109664483328659,0.09264659306661664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418429361723485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651755467234005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998743690796087,0.08079314647231381,0.05934226955303741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397000846778033,0.0,0.0,0.16326576124400824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229371344013666,0.0,0.0,0.13107168222997845
mentalhealth,FetisFlinger,2020/03/21,"No personality whatsoever. For the past two years now, I feel like I could be totally happy doing absolutely nothing. Staring at a wall for hours on end. I don't enjoy any of my hobbies, haven't felt a genuine smile in ages, and basically any sign of emotion is forced. 
  
I know my parents and friends can tell but Im so sick of forcing my emotions that I literally just avoid every interaction. I was walking my dog down the street earlier today, saw a totally normal person coming down the other way but I turned around so I wouldn't have to act friendly.  
  
I can just imagine what's going through other people's heads when they talk to me. ""why isn't he reacting?"" ""why doesn't he care"" etc etc etc. The truth is that I just want to get to my bed, stare at the ceiling for a while and then fall asleep.  
  
Not sure what any of you can do about it but it's really making me question what I'm going to do in the future. Im scared of going to college, living on my own, getting a job, having to take on any responsibilities... I'm supposed to graduate in a year and my life feels like a dead-end.",3.1239804800844087,4.408385650224215,5.029918227380642,82.36453442363494,73.66367713004485,7.578897388551834,26.57056185702981,8.124751697461798,1.6103333685043526,852,30,176,13,17,293,133,223,0.115,0.802,0.083,-0.7975,2,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,1,0,9,11,0,2,13,0,18,4,2,2,4,31,36,12,0,4,7,1,3,2,2,1,2,0,1,2,9,6,0,1,6,0,0,7,7,2,0,1,3,6,21,9,29,30,6,33,0,0,3,0,13,13,0,1,14,115,30,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3143220194504261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286732631071678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11781473791769605,0.0,0.0,0.09953931411352493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226025770569392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599648059914951,0.20469262874726088,0.0,0.3866188919026461,0.0,0.0,0.0973590086962721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685488463575015,0.16510322811619493,0.11094971045464246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17855306384339004,0.0,0.12074411839369492,0.0,0.19701555802093795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300910362190598,0.0,0.0,0.11859147322108562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137971561494148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24963573396150976,0.0,0.11466925548383035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350531283055881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161902301546749,0.11290743982561402,0.0,0.10203606836675526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713301791106238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321812960192892,0.11087692884074717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830875202876094,0.0,0.11030911882346403,0.08011041288284126,0.2017941351376063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944663312544746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402668397154792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156894510103866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890803125795136,0.0,0.08688203070647846,0.09287771811658686,0.1009990609124961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953143299942143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568928567830784,0.11287921215251633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815658901414401,0.09172117924301686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20853855199121268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882563836519574
mentalhealth,dummybitchboy,2020/03/21,"I miss therapy My boyfriend thinks our relationship is dying and it's almost entirely because my emotions are out of control. I'm so depressed and anxious and miserable all the time and often times I lash out at him because of it. It's been a cycle of me angry at him because of how he acts as a response to how I act as a response to how he acts. I love him so much but I have so many changes happening in my life and without therapy, it's difficult to be the person he needs. 
I'm just venting, really.",2.2116190476190454,3.89458006666667,4.580952380952382,82.99904761904762,76.90476190476191,7.7142857142857135,30.714285714285715,8.515128840125781,2.5289999999999995,397,20,80,8,9,139,63,105,0.098,0.8490000000000001,0.053,-0.369,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,0,1,8,5,0,1,5,0,5,2,0,4,1,19,12,14,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,7,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,4,0,0,1,0,13,1,15,10,2,10,0,3,0,1,10,5,0,2,2,58,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19808548007785284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22347727501070014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36176282257510456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20926450416377976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22186895492930708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17037977537805254,0.0,0.20530315590230705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22251786934647744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17492921050185278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13972422944155835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785378624908194,0.0,0.0,0.20055572268355007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541849777649524,0.1466790427254591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727264612845491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126726846192194,0.0,0.0,0.2123817799967044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4524427107276523,0.0,0.0,0.1267533567420964,0.0,0.0,0.2306977503846827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19068884577624826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,554sdefu,2020/03/21,"I need to snap out if it I’ve been struggling these last couple of days. I’m not sure why, but I think it’s not normal for me to not want to get out of bed. I eat mindlessly even though I know it’s only hurting my health.  I need to snap out if it. I know what I need to do in order to achieve my goals, but I can’t get out of bed. I don’t feel dad or depressed. I just can’t move.",-0.8361263736263709,0.20687564835164807,1.8132829670329684,102.32234203296707,83.72527472527472,4.9895604395604405,16.869505494505493,5.148860815047168,-1.0303527472527472,288,5,83,1,8,100,51,91,0.156,0.8440000000000001,0.0,-0.8937,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,3,4,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,23,16,6,0,7,9,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,6,4,1,0,4,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,1,1,13,1,15,15,0,9,0,2,0,0,1,5,0,3,2,50,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386478386104788,0.0,0.13909693513479454,0.0,0.1857664410621608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206963534645044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245581221301715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905521195659902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253697047407565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292596957577953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308918560305518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370661824773367,0.17580947521004925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292356482509017,0.0,0.4797760242092052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21132239631325864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640357479950561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22547747452937825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20327756892035292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13820020552565435,0.21190629939066175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721472935162711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194619301190652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kateismyrealname,2020/03/21,"We think my son's gf may have harmed herself She made comments like ""I dont want to be here anymore"" ""it would be better if I wasn't here"" and the like. we called the police. I assume the police will go there? will an ambulance go there? where will they take her? will they let us know that she's ok? my son is so upset and I do t have clear answers for him",-0.5512820512820511,1.440140282051285,1.2541025641025634,101.50756410256413,88.48717948717947,3.97948717948718,15.076923076923075,5.033348758259628,-1.1972153846153848,274,5,68,1,9,89,55,78,0.092,0.7440000000000001,0.16399999999999998,0.716,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,3,0,2,1,6,6,0,1,4,1,15,0,0,1,1,14,22,4,0,3,1,2,0,2,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,2,0,16,4,2,11,0,3,0,0,0,0,15,1,0,3,2,48,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28692259408961024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558754775673671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954228134200267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3390748543511612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3288485977459541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899987759998122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29584404004244125,0.0,0.2826892477531616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27375671033076104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175287646377905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18538127651312705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3480101471357684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064539686302274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055209715346021,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oh-hey-therex,2020/03/21,"Self-Image Issues, help? Hey everyone, I’m dealing with a lot of Self-Image issues usually I keep myself super busy with work and I can pretend it’s not an issue but due to being quarantined it’s making me see everything that’s wrong. I guess here’s the back story 3 weeks after my 18th birthday I started dating a man who was 25 and ex-navy. Things moved way too fast and I basically moved in with him after a month (I still had my apartment but was there everyday) mind you this was my first ever relationship. Everything was good until it wasn’t. For months I would wake up to him telling me nobody will ever love me, I’m a disgusting fat b****. Then it started getting physical I explained my rape to him in the beginning to prevent him from triggering me but then he would reenact it on me for punishment, all I would hear is you need to go to the gym you look so bad, he eventually began starving me. He didn’t work because he had his pension and I did grocery delivery. So he was with me 24/7 and I couldn’t get away. He eventually had a schizophrenic break down and tried killing me. I left him and tried to move on but I fell to pieces, I found an amazing job and friends but I started starving myself, it lead to me not eating for around 90 days and I wound up in the hospital because they thought I was having a heart attack but it was just stress triggered. I lost 80 pounds from it and resumed a regular diet and everything was normal. Then I met my next boyfriend who at the time was my roommate and in a drunken night we hooked up and started dating for around one year. The first 3 months were great yk the honeymoon phase but then he started becoming controlling, he became mentally abusive going through the garbage seeing what I would eat and yelling at me because he thought I was cheating meanwhile I was loyal. He installed security cameras so he can watch me when I got home from work and listen to my phone calls, and if he heard me complaining about him he would freak out and scare me he took control of my life and my money. Eventually after a year I left him but we still had to live together until I closed on my townhouse. Every morning if I was wearing a dress to work he would call me a fat s*ut and stuff like that. Fast forward to now I can’t look at myself and think I look good. Some days if I’m alone and not busy I just feel empty, I’m not depressed or anxious, I’m just here I’m alive but I feel nothing, I’m not scared of anything. I’ve had a coworker say when they see me cross the street it looks like I’m trying to get hit. It’s really hard trying to date, I haven’t had any guys I’ve been on a date with compliment me or anything so I’m my fucked up head it’s a reminder who I am I’m just disgusting. When I get out of the shower I can’t even look at myself without clothes because it disgusts me. I stopped doing my makeup because no matter what I do I don’t think it’ll make me look good. I can’t even go shopping for cute clothes because I just think why would I spend money on this to look good when no matter what I won’t look good. I just wanna look at myself and think I’m beautiful for once. This month I went to the doctors for the first time and told them my starving story on how I actually lost the weight and was diagnosed with a eating disorder. I’m 20 years old and have never felt so broken, I don’t know how to fix it.",2.0749151849581047,3.949988954220317,3.5588882076435766,89.30895565092995,77.91273247496424,6.49818107500511,24.829143674637237,7.447530270364453,1.1242010627426935,2665,96,563,36,63,878,300,699,0.16,0.728,0.11199999999999999,-0.9915,2,2,0,0,1,0,52.0,2,3,3,13,32,35,9,3,30,0,50,19,6,9,4,109,118,56,1,14,26,0,5,2,1,10,7,5,2,2,27,38,7,6,12,3,4,12,19,19,0,4,37,23,97,16,72,68,4,99,0,3,13,3,54,31,1,8,58,363,124,8,0.0,0.06517767676366276,0.0536816781615211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05697361431448905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03740858424812347,0.0,0.0,0.0621454723693517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09053683852357652,0.09794085821672624,0.0,0.06258164565402377,0.05168356472272241,0.042299178958903234,0.04593092683967859,0.20120096321671546,0.06075405722567667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123424142794797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339644831910546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095360456968174,0.056712739693651024,0.04737990304627682,0.05583383962263276,0.0,0.0,0.06304605372764148,0.056304912261296476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16886642878057992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726669739963727,0.09951911707742672,0.046348171031685495,0.05256426890169956,0.14831791789736568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05562926586364272,0.0,0.05281808252701173,0.0,0.0,0.14037405047427867,0.0,0.06031546098196185,0.0425004735158205,0.05085571974493526,0.11496150433987185,0.0,0.0937900960715824,0.23069826053661446,0.0439964021492876,0.060648553632262625,0.06059955144591622,0.05446839996155569,0.0,0.0,0.04927802040621202,0.0,0.05645597626099175,0.0,0.062000098745216524,0.06518693690297367,0.036871942778838734,0.0,0.05517936460199066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17224797362425684,0.05458878779077082,0.04889528207306914,0.060860248442409816,0.0,0.0302319748311502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953672557980954,0.0,0.038855083764886465,0.053750067937859684,0.0,0.04857470522133827,0.0,0.415749773403482,0.0,0.12009949862668633,0.04676740714911279,0.0496485371936591,0.0,0.07343900383137049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05543699016734921,0.0,0.05554426677632289,0.0,0.17563334921821908,0.17540029394077375,0.0,0.0407891066168653,0.042426987433570734,0.0,0.05850359936045524,0.05162301758995086,0.05389797313002697,0.05278343452952333,0.0,0.05772358373702525,0.05858369473477025,0.037276097906521706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03524071840465656,0.0,0.0,0.05905999184886684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043746040513364726,0.11014891243847494,0.0,0.13150718448024307,0.0,0.11477454113678527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19468127419615985,0.0,0.08786187425636884,0.04599069763048525,0.06301359711396258,0.0,0.06297311705667091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0480810334030366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03654609988628882,0.14099236226612072,0.0,0.0873433522000475,0.06415337161917893,0.0,0.0,0.05256426890169956,0.061117967228803416,0.1493923083551732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060585577847564936,0.0,0.0,0.04366425829216565,0.044125583385439,0.06698717734522337,0.0,0.0509946819065068,0.04963783323093168,0.0,0.0,0.053027532198806335,0.0,0.16019130334269302,0.0,0.0,0.2735419330345354,0.06014463519112311,0.0,0.10627361915272847
mentalhealth,super_taz,2020/03/21,"My Anxiety and Depression - COVID19 Hello everyone, this is my first time posting here so bear with me please and thank you in advance for your helpful insight :)

Currently we are all facing an unprecedented pandemic event, my thoughts are out for every life loving fighter, I'm confident we will beat this sooner rather than later. 

I'm a university student living outside of my uni alone in a private room and rarely go out and about only for classes and shopping, recently they have enforced a lockdown where I live and decided to go back( 2 days before the lockdown while the number of the cases were low) to my parents place throughout this lockdown to be with them and  take care of them if they needed groceries and so on. I've booked the bus (4 hour journey) which was half empty in the morning and I arrived and kept my distance, I've been here for 4 days now practicing social distancing and cleaning my hands regularly though I'm truly getting anxious for my parents as I'm afraid that I have the virus and asymptomatic, transmitting it to them in the process, I might seem crazy but every time someone is coughing and feeling tired I instantly go blank, I start to internally freak out and assuming the worst possible. I'm really getting extremely worried and its taking a toll on me mentally and physically, I honestly can't seem to get over it, I start regretting my decision to come back and should have stayed back, but kind of thought it was okay as alot of students were leaving too, chose the time where the bus was empty and avoided any close contacts in the process.

Reading the news as well doesn't help at all. I hope someone else can help me figure out how to stop over thinking and train my mind to think positive, even if the situation turns out to be negative.

I'm truly tired, mentally and physically because of this habit of thinking.",12.208516958545781,8.423238089337175,10.972737752161384,63.935391265794706,57.155619596541776,14.250410108623367,48.0179561072933,11.95083700844419,5.66069159831523,1495,74,257,31,13,475,199,347,0.139,0.752,0.109,-0.9372,3,5,0,0,1,0,28.0,2,2,5,3,17,15,0,2,19,1,21,7,2,1,2,63,53,32,0,7,5,2,2,0,0,3,4,0,2,0,10,31,0,3,13,3,1,6,3,7,1,2,9,2,31,8,44,39,4,48,0,3,0,1,18,21,0,8,19,172,41,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857580501323758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129031917697022,0.0,0.08019727787993869,0.11843192277015692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418312825395361,0.0,0.06390547862532832,0.0,0.08920551742934094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688465650085736,0.0,0.0,0.09030470707991976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352177640024665,0.0,0.09029286936760822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757486886498557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924148392605732,0.0,0.17665335230019633,0.10017282350091154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053006926066689664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917125185402203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16431340230147642,0.0,0.17873774212444885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21080289101105898,0.0,0.0,0.10412323837511712,0.10323979971250856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091678727162705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100345298284453,0.0,0.0,0.07404694347355906,0.0,0.0,0.18513965758167705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461625277581004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112948566578879,0.11121168988191124,0.1058518675999741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773265115761935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973053841505952,0.0,0.0,0.2328102091306845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952860922487527,0.11507561215348558,0.0,0.1181839273605754,0.1004014358753314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486178747924517,0.0,0.0671589720271149,0.0,0.10351035314384592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908728130816146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783715425588183,0.0,0.10686446773615586,0.17765002986255138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840326576560786,0.11173847512982044,0.0,0.08764543163413865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764336741378193,0.0,0.0,0.09651652654262242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015190639292431,0.10299830098296303,0.16645204787829587,0.1833876273694909,0.2409811848995582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140286551836076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094257832830043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646342478273613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AislingPeartree,2020/03/21,"For Help With Depression & Anxiety I highly recommend Tapping (Emotional Freedom Technique) for any and all mental and emotional health issues, including depression, anxiety, OCD, suicidal thoughts, addiction, etc. It has literally saved my life. Lots of free videos and info online![Tapping for Anxiety](https://youtu.be/4g6PqHYvy_A)",15.481333333333332,18.94311357777778,11.762222222222226,37.450000000000024,46.55555555555557,17.555555555555557,52.77777777777778,15.021129683784007,10.306111111111113,281,17,25,13,3,82,38,45,0.23199999999999998,0.5,0.268,0.3367,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,9,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,3,5,1,3,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23091879420817304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295105871675851,0.0,0.14404718939513006,0.0,0.3240886731638381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36488640266958505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4765456738945544,0.0,0.0,0.2362391063916295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22515839024496725,0.0,0.0,0.14198077343962073,0.2238030732368453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210886171206843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14961714597164966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18008469688251685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21346818604964168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23170044124513045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816413464507046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pandemicshityouknow,2020/03/21,"ADHD or just addicted to pot/nicotine? Hey everyone — So, a bit of background:

My father/sister have diagnosed ADHD *(I suspect my brother may too, but he hasn't looked into it).* About a month ago, I met someone who shared their experience with ADHD with me, and ever since then I've been really curious about my own mental health. This COVID-19 pandemic has given me a good amount of time to reflect on what I believe *could* be possible symptoms *(and yes, I know you're not qualified to diagnose me)*, but another part of me feels that I may be experiencing the impostor phenomenon, in that I could have internalized the idea of having ADHD—and that I'm tricking myself into thinking I have it—rather than actually having it.

In high school, I didn't use any drugs. To this day, I rarely even drink coffee. But in college, I picked up vaping and even smoke weed regularly. Now (senior year), I've heard that if you don't treat an undiagnosed person with ADHD with stimulants, they sooner or later will do it by themselves with things like caffein, nicotine and alcohol *(unless they've unknowingly discovered healthier coping mechanisms like exercise, etc.).*

I'm not asking for a diagnoses, but I would like to start some dialogue in order to dispel some the stereotypes that have ultimately prevented myself *(and I'm sure many others)* from going in for a diagnosis. The following are a few of these concerns:

**Is it possible that me becoming accustomed to nicotine/cannabis has made me \*think\* that I have ADHD?** I've already brought up my parents that I believe I could have ADHD, and they know I smoke weed, although they discourage it. They told me that my mental health is a priority, so they would take me to see a specialist, if I really wanted. However, they suggested that I should really give up weed/nicotine for at least 2-3 months to see if my ""craving for dopamine"" subsides. Part of this really resonated with me—because prior to college—I hadn't had a nicotine addiction, I wasn't a regular smoker (pot), and I never had occasionally experimented with stimulants to get assignments done. I'm worried that going down this path has made me believe that I have ADHD, when in reality, I could've given these symptoms to myself by creating a dependency? I actually haven't had nicotine in my system in over two weeks and I feel fine. However, I *need* weed in oder to sleep.

Not long ago, when I traveled abroad, I went about 2 weeks off cannabis to see if I could sleep at night—and I literally *couldn't* turn my brain off. I'm a very light sleeper as well. I ended up needing to use Benadryl/melatonin because I was becoming so sleep deprived after the first few days. By the time the trip ended, I pretty much kicked the difficulty getting to sleep. But as soon as I returned home, I went straight back to cannabis. This is what worries me about taking a few months off to see if my symptoms subside. I feel like I'd just be torturing myself. I feel like people will just tell me to give up weed and see how I feel, but as embarrassing as it is to say, I physically can't see myself doing so.

**Is it possible that cannabis gets a bad rap about ""being addictive,"" when it could actually just be a ton of neurodiverse people using it as a way to self-medicate?**

**I've heard that ADHD isn't something that is just readily/easily diagnosed—but I also commonly hear that psychiatrists misdiagnose or push pills for profit—do I have anything to fear with this happening to me?**

When things die down, I do want to take additional steps to investigate my mental health further, in a person-to-person setting. I have no clue how to find a reputable psychiatrist/ADHD specialist, and since I'm under my parents coverage, that probably needs to be factored in too. So if there's any additional tips for finding a reputable physician that I could trust, I'd appreciate it. Writing this out has definitely helped me organize my thoughts for when I do go see someone.",4.8349816365170994,6.777770872139975,6.124047722243768,73.58612496293088,70.42664872139973,9.505659602618794,31.704929625658693,9.904859398305758,3.4767640988206314,3150,142,544,83,59,1058,325,743,0.068,0.843,0.08900000000000001,0.8805,4,1,7,0,0,0,129.0,0,1,7,1,34,19,2,2,28,1,60,23,5,11,3,99,120,47,1,21,24,3,5,5,0,7,17,4,1,1,43,23,2,2,15,4,0,11,14,7,1,2,21,19,81,12,96,79,14,81,0,2,8,0,29,32,0,15,39,382,124,5,0.0,0.0,0.13461404903351712,0.15037999569838165,0.5526087496418611,0.0,0.08151972087631777,0.0491402818931033,0.0,0.0,0.05074177228989677,0.036771420560431714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253804732779934,0.0482156534158684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03783888916339288,0.0,0.0429865324217937,0.0,0.0,0.035356965638062635,0.03839266486880747,0.0560598394412505,0.10156599567987633,0.0,0.15541634730067355,0.0,0.0,0.050199932067400095,0.0,0.0,0.051330605138926136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569876244160839,0.0,0.0,0.05930857809567205,0.0,0.0,0.14001088419918442,0.047721578497508334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04705507940275732,0.0,0.0450444033979037,0.053323987698062965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145199198344302,0.0,0.05128157126228603,0.060740746412784714,0.04159293501010479,0.0,0.0439373315296015,0.0,0.08995753767884891,0.0,0.051742015615612716,0.11624823991988335,0.06569844207514397,0.0,0.0,0.0840525882342496,0.03911187404619882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207036978059282,0.08821936522721589,0.07839710570305393,0.0385671337898961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04066132356213584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14662867902371154,0.051824536902263074,0.0,0.030820456706893387,0.04858202108963176,0.04612323326791352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05190756125261845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050540503224153696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232128801890297,0.0,0.0,0.04069221554151698,0.0386129124700585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701768900674407,0.0,0.04661806400931219,0.0,0.0,0.05107512463698529,0.0,0.13901573065961498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010607852293833,0.0,0.0338017222683754,0.1022841868250655,0.03546379796810531,0.0,0.0,0.04315055998685799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102114116229914,0.09958705291503912,0.0,0.06375561980768996,0.12044792021672204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551183094678442,0.0,0.04677975637781367,0.04957587668713282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782780662524618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03656636580901704,0.0,0.046535772855470066,0.2564893363643997,0.0,0.04796877394523952,0.0,0.0,0.0760728093413503,0.0,0.1840589874466209,0.0,0.07792001847929841,0.03539883559551718,0.0,0.0,0.032545970354722696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043337056850777884,0.1433772768088721,0.10371718579100077,0.0,0.04018989227959675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061096183410091535,0.058926227772835287,0.0,0.03650420620989702,0.05362441096336553,0.0,0.0,0.0439373315296015,0.0,0.0,0.05001471109208765,0.044917282755191336,0.0,0.0,0.11913986020753853,0.0,0.03793958569994615,0.054242206726979325,0.03649800582530318,0.07376723491650895,0.0,0.04134292621069695,0.08525069565270091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933929708073628,0.0,0.06532793283406267,0.0,0.0,0.029610603902156713
mentalhealth,DownbeatSmile,2020/03/21,"Overthinking is ruining my life It's been pointed out to me that I overthink a lot. Not just on big issues, but also little things that shouldn't require lots of thought. I've tried to keep this post short-ish, as I can ramble a lot, but please let  me know if you have any questions.

It's gotten to the point where I won't join in on conversations, because I'm waiting for the ""right"" moment to say something, which always means I never say anything, because the right moment is never there. I'm becoming the quiet person who never says anything and no one wants to be that person. (To be clear, I don't think there's anything wrong with  being a quiet person, but I've been told it's not a good quality to be quiet all the time. :( )

It also  means I really struggle with comforting people when they're going  through tough times. They come to me with an issue and, if I can't think  of anything to say, my brain internally panics and wants to ""run away"". This means I freeze and don't say anything, which is basically not doing anything at all. I get the sense that this really annoys people,  especially my girlfriend, who has told me she sometimes gets fed up with me not being able to help her when she's having trouble and she feels she can't get upset, because then I'll get upset (because I don't know  what to do) and it doesn't help her problem at all.

Another thing I do is add loads of little caveats to things. I usually do this  to let people I have thought about something and to avoid people  ""jumping down my throat"", but it often means I say a lot without really saying anything at all. I'm trying to reduce the amount of these that I use, but it's difficult, because I've got into the habit of caveating things all the time.

Anyway, I don't want this to ruin my life, or my relationship. Is there anything I can do?",5.763957845433255,5.5711445136612046,6.392388758782199,80.27450819672133,66.97814207650272,8.720062451209992,29.72365339578454,8.11559375814309,1.9601227166276347,1436,45,282,16,21,471,169,366,0.127,0.8,0.073,-0.9631,0,1,2,0,0,0,47.0,0,1,1,1,12,15,1,5,15,0,34,5,2,1,9,65,65,21,0,7,14,0,2,0,1,2,2,10,0,3,27,15,1,4,12,0,0,4,18,13,0,1,9,12,36,2,42,47,10,36,0,2,0,0,28,19,0,9,12,199,63,1,0.06780345388756287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084447951543417,0.056417905255895726,0.0,0.0,0.0461086737230482,0.07109783329316116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4463717225662501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370357688058173,0.0,0.0,0.20666178080476105,0.07488358777198703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569107848704082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584066717960291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0342834635513916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14169802468757806,0.0,0.03853426537550999,0.05687032020780694,0.054228616037274385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089445181073176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153837993651547,0.0,0.06026682519578765,0.0,0.0,0.07452601008619217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866725084916304,0.09578316933428066,0.0,0.13591374680360527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23057628728299864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29543135418873456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156882610765296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04594537512139149,0.0,0.0,0.0795527440667994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18802551069846013,0.17761008190045793,0.0,0.07442783137347997,0.12819235987367147,0.0,0.06493696621850284,0.0,0.0,0.06487874831393331,0.0,0.0,0.07595538590346491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030988630110796,0.0,0.0,0.07279553474098369,0.0,0.11580755829640152,0.0,0.3774401957393016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043968227593819,0.06705934962462635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708828917114402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18018240779495412,0.08689143093535387,0.0,0.10765673733486174,0.11861021766831092,0.0,0.0,0.12957821168549638,0.0,0.09206818890810103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856041430187151,0.07467592525733824,0.0,0.11997670148939853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536010997571619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413243286153952,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yhenziii,2020/03/21,"Need advice about this girl Recently this girl dumped me, I'm trying to move on and such but I have this weird feeling. Someone give me advice, I would appreciate it alot",2.1059090909090905,4.8449722424242445,3.0032575757575763,88.22488636363637,84.15151515151516,5.724242424242425,20.37121212121212,7.1686216300943375,0.6728848484848484,136,4,26,2,4,43,26,33,0.11699999999999999,0.733,0.149,0.2818,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,6,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,3,5,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,17,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6397199277585407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550626683532574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.314001696098826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3478965900564356,0.0,0.2427086771287979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231957292918731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773429382487036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222334131676557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325235696232093,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cloudybulb,2020/03/21,"February: I'm finally getting treatment works! I can stop being a paranoid, hoarding shut-in!!! March: Stop up on toilet paper. Don't go outside. The national guard is being mobilized to fight the virus.

Ok seriously??",2.479285714285716,5.20823707894737,4.537669172932333,72.19868421052634,99.26315789473685,7.434586466165412,31.74436090225564,7.957251820313856,3.9266045112781964,171,10,24,5,7,58,34,38,0.295,0.652,0.053,-0.8413,0,0,0,0,1,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,3,1,5,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,6,0,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,12,1,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4840380289224226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308545652771055,0.0,0.25112025664859755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7388325383695695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3216806696006702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,useyourillusion1,2020/03/21,"Depression makes everything difficult to deal with First things first, my childhood was fucked up. It could've definitely been worse but it did a lot of damage on me. I am now 20 years old (female) and I struggle every single day with my anger, anxiety, and depression. My family is my main source of my many negative emotions even though I love them but they create so many (financial) issues that I have to fix and it feels like an unbearable weight on my shoulders. I work and go to college full time in hopes of one day having a job I love and be happy. But I often think of hurting myself and I don't know why. I don't have insurance to cover psych help so i have been trying to deal with this alone since i graduated from high school.  I often feel guilty for being this way because many people are in way worse situations but i have no way out of my head and i am constantly tired and in a bad mood and i am afraid of that affecting my relationships with people. I truly want to feel better. I came on reddit as an outlet and a way to put my thoughts into words and hopefully not feel alone or like i'm insane. I would love to know if anyone understands what I am saying and if anyone is struggling with the same issues.",3.0126394557823097,4.894554726530616,4.324081632653062,84.84068027210886,75.20408163265307,7.605442176870749,22.27891156462585,8.418075326091056,1.297748299319728,968,26,193,18,21,319,143,245,0.225,0.6,0.174,-0.9287,1,2,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,2,4,7,21,2,3,7,0,21,8,2,2,0,48,41,23,0,6,8,0,5,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,9,20,1,0,9,0,0,3,5,11,0,3,6,6,32,9,31,32,5,28,0,4,0,4,10,11,1,8,12,137,41,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019908489969927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459818623606594,0.0,0.0,0.1363685567034182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142038221722955,0.059443823057611485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624348970890107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153040149362564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537833498457004,0.0,0.0778572479797356,0.0,0.0,0.12577733569188473,0.20106595969904556,0.1679778781259243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969048249707278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440728725120091,0.0,0.08216001853481794,0.0,0.08763958111142765,0.0,0.0919278203036802,0.0,0.19722467630106136,0.06966424814627477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16589125787206985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015041551453944,0.0,0.0,0.055419634044498886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038058046077262,0.0,0.0,0.10007782298104724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536179173182728,0.10302923070122873,0.0,0.1937074407796649,0.0,0.0,0.10439109408246244,0.0,0.0,0.2035592256111388,0.09676791374608576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071826377258072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528114011237346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829031858791074,0.2640314371802702,0.0,0.06509156436657497,0.29659263842473954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232487289493897,0.0,0.06607822545601184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520829957953706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802882306042816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469388364110026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754729948126363,0.0,0.09868969569093212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806648513990423,0.10961017893734804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203886275260898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06478417976795844,0.06248323741368885,0.09580732216657284,0.07741547590673145,0.0568613829195055,0.1120783634167586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620582080266559,0.0,0.0,0.1015158438943353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057516471168491415,0.3096093063211384,0.0,0.11874616861399248,0.0,0.0,0.08799150446505201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099158477448164,0.0,0.19875084151211828,0.06927137356818881,0.0,0.0,0.062796023553847
mentalhealth,effy290,2020/03/21,"Losing my nan and aunt within a month of each other. You go onto social media and see posts about how shit the year 2020 has been. It's true - more so for others. 

On the 10th of February, my aunt died. 
On the 6th of March, my nan died. 
And then, COVID-19 hit the UK. 

I have symptoms of COVID-19 and the funeral is on Monday. I had written a eulogy in preparation and I was due to be a pallbearer, guardian of my nans body, one of the last people to give her strength. I can't be there, I can't use the public transport with these symptoms, I can't justify putting everyone at risk for my own emotional merit. 

Everyone is too obsessed with COVID-19 to even look my way. Or they tell me ""you're doing the right thing"". 

Doesn't feel like the right fucking thing.",3.107745098039217,4.552560248366014,3.958970588235297,89.38786764705885,73.96732026143792,7.452941176470588,25.8218954248366,8.07648339933343,1.3975189542483657,590,20,126,9,12,189,101,153,0.138,0.7959999999999999,0.066,-0.8862,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,1,2,6,9,2,2,12,0,14,5,2,2,1,13,23,9,3,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,5,0,1,4,3,16,4,21,16,3,21,0,1,2,1,9,9,2,1,8,85,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18935508160477404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35384439900752784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19175716369602852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112594624834249,0.0,0.0,0.3257850883934633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861953646237451,0.12178466473517842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15759788444314532,0.0,0.1635315157863003,0.09688271576094644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895678664189226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328362117542971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14315288007092544,0.1907136764018391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606849147588795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551570206512388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181832709881044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632642942383361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17137064805079308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29116295961697725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358434814353717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17498624481256694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737739281514169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35436971380721216,0.0,0.0,0.1489993492209579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22650699097816196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472323896242538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531210977128472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977786854384608
mentalhealth,Vape420-69,2020/03/21,Discord severs dose any one know what are good mental health severs,6.5500000000000025,9.172894000000003,4.823333333333334,81.855,67.33333333333334,4.800000000000002,20.333333333333336,3.1291,0.03223333333333312,56,1,8,0,1,16,11,12,0.17300000000000001,0.6409999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244735262366821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768650729781113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35087180827543096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18140964518825187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33265457426225337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223678530198332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7458188329109219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emo_darkness19,2020/03/21,I think I might have bipolar disorder So I already have inattentive ADHD but I'm just wondering I think I might also have bipolar disorder too like I have a Voice in my head saying stuff to me when I'm angry and when I'm low. I think I may have it cos when I get energy highs I feel different like almost joker crazy I might go see some1 about it see I they can get a proper diagnosis,0.1889024390243889,2.4611686219512205,3.0055609756097565,88.11931707317076,88.39024390243902,6.694634146341463,19.175609756097558,7.908726449838941,0.97933268292683,305,9,65,7,10,107,49,82,0.18600000000000005,0.6859999999999999,0.128,-0.6929,1,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,1,0,8,3,0,0,2,0,10,3,1,1,0,14,23,7,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,4,2,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,5,15,2,3,19,0,7,0,1,2,0,2,3,0,6,5,42,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033534005991614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16943592575099506,0.0,0.1867236440658261,0.13531442310082578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17678483906978662,0.38785074910264733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555591968710566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17680688536353922,0.0,0.09616398613654444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365474434561465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17877601834859586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16533155432753954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5385042548496328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455984617752856,0.0,0.0,0.2696714385613215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937010263106298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3252621898364641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18349729401244674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,omarcoming9439,2020/03/21,"This virus pandemic has really made me realize how alone I really am 
Staying indoors. Single and I feel like I have no one.  Friends aren’t responsive and starting to question how good of friends they are.  It’s like I feel I don’t like anyone and I hate myself and who I am.  And it’s eating away at me.  I have never felt so alone and out of place in this world

Everyone seems to be happy and fine because they have significant others they can hang with and I am here struggling with being alone and feeling like I really do have no place in this world",1.6561309523809555,4.0235475892857115,3.2214285714285715,88.59023809523809,82.03571428571429,6.590476190476192,21.833333333333336,7.793537801064563,1.090444047619048,438,14,89,8,12,144,63,112,0.134,0.625,0.24100000000000002,0.91,1,3,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,3,0,4,11,1,1,0,0,15,1,0,3,1,23,23,12,0,0,0,0,4,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,7,12,1,0,7,0,0,1,5,2,0,1,2,4,16,9,11,19,1,13,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,2,6,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4631041268383366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421733079152334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003483542803255,0.0,0.0,0.09085784466548646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15251258751515465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424210730148843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22608836480195305,0.31943824158202444,0.14310877227558091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303071332765409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250137954728773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15866361188249584,0.0,0.14715334166244082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29126790918175943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141032149747948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11495445863383412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099830117646802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114453902059124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669670760372425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2864505319227005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568705512331708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549643910685308,0.15886457992163094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15581658929579306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jocoteverde,2020/03/21,"Should I look for a new therapist? I started going to therapy in around october, I didn't do a good research before making the appointment and ended up going with a therapist specialized in psychoanalysis. At the begining this was a problem because big parts of the sessions were complete silence. But then I read a bit about psychoanalysis and learned that I had to do 99% of the talk. After that the silcence was not an issue but I still had the feeling I wasn't going there to solve my problems, I was just going there the tell the therapist about my week and how I felt, sometimes feeling the same or sometimes even worse after leaving. Now I'm not saying that was completely useless, I'm sure I've become much more open, and that having someone to talk to about whats making me stressed at the moment must help, as I don't normally speak with my friends or family about my problems But I have the feeling that I'm not solving my real issues. We have spoken about important topics but only to never touch the subject again.

Two sessions ago I expressed this to my therapist and he told me that I could be right but that the decision was mine. I also gave him a kind of mind map that I made with what I think are my problems. On our last session I asked him for a recomendation on what I should do, and he gave me as options (not really recomentations): to continue our sessions; to investigate about Behavioral therapy and see if it suits me better (and then find someone else); or group psychoanalysis with him. 

My biggest problem i think is that my lack of friends and love life caused by appearance issues, other isecurities, and maybe issues from the past makes me depressed, that affects my already poor performace at university leading to even more depression. And I also feel I have some type of attention deficit 

Tl;dr: I go to psychoanalysis therapy, I feel it isn't working because I don' talk about my real problems, and when I do I get no feedback or questions and we don't touch the topic again. I told my therapist about it and gave him a mind map where I wrote down what I think my problems are and he told me that it was for me to decide if I wanted to keep trying therapy with him or move on. My problems are mostly social, caused by insecurities and appearance issues.



Here is the ""mind map"" I gave to my therapist:
https://i.imgur.com/EeQSNQ3",7.379285714285714,7.327492178571433,7.702817857142861,71.75468214285719,63.59821428571429,10.560857142857145,36.00035714285714,10.17224662633116,3.669639178571429,1888,81,334,38,25,619,201,448,0.147,0.78,0.073,-0.9890000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,4,0,0,3,24,21,0,2,25,0,32,2,0,9,3,96,72,36,0,17,17,0,8,0,2,3,1,2,0,0,22,25,0,1,15,1,1,9,11,13,0,1,21,12,63,8,53,46,9,48,0,3,2,1,35,19,0,13,20,255,85,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05351662148516211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666226084175315,0.09655981028639754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05374436779923896,0.056440183058700764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360509029338277,0.06667673647718053,0.051372592039802094,0.0,0.0,0.053394612936383694,0.06591118649947106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403847518055727,0.0,0.0,0.126598936722464,0.0,0.0,0.04820256733814621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399757494371276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504335173517003,0.0,0.05347215836035472,0.0,0.0,0.07975099766180771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569138656119784,0.0,0.15263087231487393,0.0,0.05796711414353298,0.0,0.05517941549634645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932873622659755,0.0,0.03154216475377339,0.0,0.17155555270722336,0.05063762924146816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040466446593582665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150662762436603,0.0,0.053661894968647136,0.0,0.06286871878018364,0.0,0.04921168476241043,0.0,0.06392581164740131,0.0,0.0,0.042642916363043834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050697735440851696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448858203234562,0.05712596504289976,0.12089743457186207,0.0,0.06065233948948474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18287719081407466,0.0,0.0,0.06416646454664665,0.04438076962819286,0.0,0.04656303117536093,0.05830818344954255,0.0,0.0,0.059152279125913775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045916043549156085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06537758665492739,0.05763242874370857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4621470026216576,0.0,0.0,0.0676310711143895,0.0,0.060388886068652774,0.1374343546234258,0.03867620043226898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051557826463300566,0.0,0.04801067366406154,0.0,0.0,0.04810910461432955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061542210199146526,0.10230692868539687,0.0,0.11941998817863747,0.0,0.042732000493073234,0.0,0.048213595138360134,0.0,0.06915655021424964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05690041238690737,0.0,0.0,0.14557550259645033,0.05276826832907995,0.0,0.27616508245905746,0.42058309143452705,0.0,0.11605287383350466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306567161376474,0.0,0.040988997405204286,0.0,0.058975207312072786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035609293244905776,0.0,0.04842721671021703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043951934268525984,0.0,0.06152478459034817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RegularGazelle47865,2020/03/21,"What’s the difference between a trigger and a cause for an anxiety disorder? People with anxiety disorders often say that there are things that trigger their anxiety and panic attacks. But most people don’t have an anxiety disorder despite experiencing these things. The things that are triggering to them aren’t triggering for people without an anxiety disorder, so is it bad to say that those things directly caused the anxiety disorder when they don’t cause it in most people? Somebody who has anxiety might say that being in tight crowds will trigger their anxiety, but many people don’t have any problem being in tight crowds.",11.835454545454546,10.649978909090912,10.79727272727273,56.8359090909091,55.36363636363636,15.345454545454546,46.54545454545455,13.968273953766033,6.953490909090909,520,27,74,18,5,166,58,110,0.247,0.753,0.0,-0.9558,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,4,0,4,4,1,1,8,0,14,0,0,8,0,21,14,6,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,15,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,6,4,0,10,10,2,4,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,4,1,61,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383708056880544,0.0,0.5745026980969788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679446004281093,0.0,0.0,0.07838030591632329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893012924527884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807764549799176,0.5379348206098677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517281831731643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958476395036236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014012163883384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3253997216322144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982409488064556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22395550932601604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24946106566795945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049053615307384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lemthelegend2727,2020/03/21,"Anybody know what's going on? Hi Guys,

I have been suffering with anxiety and depression for a long time now. 

I spent 2 years in Rehab and was told it was a dual diagnosis.

However, since I stopped drinking 4 years ago, I have been getting very serious ups and downs. From not leaving the room for days to self harming. Although in the last 2 years they haven't been that bad.

I can feel it coming and I just tend to as much as I can till it passes, I sleep a lot, try to play some video games till I feel myself again.

I am going through a very bad one this week. i haven't washed, barely eating, I get so angry that a punch things, the littlest things annoy me, can't look at myself, I hate myself. Where two or three weeks ago I was fine.

I have seen doctors etc and they don't know what it is. They say it's something I have to live with. That there is nothing they can do. Im on lexapro for years now. 

Im getting very pissed off about these dips and feel like I can't take much more of them. If the pubs where open I would be at the end of the bar drinking my face off.

Im way behind in college work and if i had a full time job I would be more than likely get fired.

Nothing seems to make this go faster. Exercise, healthy eating, it just comes and goes. Thats how I get through them. It goes away. It has before and it will again. I just want to crawl up in a ball and cry.

Im just wondering if anyone else has experienced anything like this or is going through something similar know what is going on?

A Councillor I seen a while ago said it was like seeing two different people: One that was fidgety, couldn't keep still, depressed, anxious and the second that was happy, calm and relaxed.

A doctor said if I had bi-polar I would of known about it before.

Thanks for your help.",1.4991196911196916,3.42600325945946,2.6609652509652517,94.81364864864868,79.91891891891892,5.525868725868727,20.841698841698843,6.474141703775902,0.10359691119691128,1386,38,311,12,35,443,190,370,0.114,0.78,0.105,-0.7569,3,0,4,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,6,1,16,20,3,0,17,0,38,13,3,2,0,48,73,26,0,9,11,0,4,4,0,4,5,3,1,2,26,17,5,2,9,10,1,8,7,10,0,6,17,12,37,10,42,49,8,54,0,3,4,0,16,20,1,10,29,209,63,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21903174574045328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300811846293311,0.093047704572547,0.0,0.05759071774344333,0.08439149582994786,0.06777842924586673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738354667246299,0.0,0.1375407458783555,0.0,0.0,0.14017113693434144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14189832452842868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047281978198547,0.05311786832288213,0.0,0.141879723598338,0.0,0.0,0.08605269115808208,0.0,0.1686057774550293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137043005906992,0.0,0.16855755781114046,0.06880442650536835,0.0,0.07294992265425261,0.0,0.09185746268630854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493690927886415,0.058840749638890036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151585563115651,0.0,0.2340463651487525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155315898220816,0.0,0.08767784799976162,0.0,0.08131724829566839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05520675131907499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3558683592209895,0.0,0.08173341042676012,0.07320877270489644,0.0,0.0,0.13579505097401925,0.06713752927102694,0.0,0.08721142288405863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095526356326484,0.0,0.07272878697053163,0.07288941385220521,0.06916488865536337,0.0,0.0,0.07002279841356149,0.0,0.0,0.05497850826517736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109381072275067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806066750084302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162375031954568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057100721793155576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15669376161316936,0.0654990379623161,0.0,0.0,0.06563332336296228,0.07498095406682186,0.08592345660093538,0.0,0.0,0.06813222638767723,0.0,0.0824233304249969,0.0,0.0,0.12681542861559494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577587559724396,0.06885986513664616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06192736356820878,0.0,0.0,0.0758295655263085,0.0,0.0,0.10943776194306427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605404452115926,0.0,0.0,0.0787021866173689,0.0,0.05591964644916903,0.0,0.1609150235882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20387640191105869,0.04858033166498207,0.06537658901040867,0.1321346218928884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893200800084645,0.059961862466561114,0.0,0.0,0.17552674396382395,0.0,0.0,0.21215847144385425
mentalhealth,spagettibrainz,2020/03/21,"My boyfriend (19M) and I (19F) have been struggling and I can’t mentally handle it anymore Hi, I am going through something very hard and confusing and I just need help. I have a boyfriend who we’ve been dating for coming up on 4 years now. We were each other’s first bf/gf and everything. We linked super well and sprouted an amazing relationship. Everything clicked inbetween us and it was definitely one you could tell can last forever. Well.. my boyfriend gave up during our transfer to college and his life started to get rocky. I was there every step of the way. He lost motivation and effort in wanting to do small things and gradually big things until it also became no motivation for our relationship. He got diagnosed with ADD and begun taking adderal, which completely killed his personality and emotions. Taking this medication daily with the already bad mindset it changed his personality and views and he seems to have given up even more. He sees himself as a disappointment and knows his parents think of him as one as well, so he doesn’t get much support there anymore and so he gives up more. He also gained anger issues and can’t control his anger very well anymore. I think over the time that this has happened he’s confused me with his parents and everyone else he believes he’s disappointed and views me the same. When in reality I’m here for him and want him to succeed. Our relationship has grown quite toxic and one sided and I can’t handle it anymore. I love him with all my heart and he loves me too and doesn’t want this to be reality, I think he’s just dug himself into such a hole that he doesn’t think he can get out.
An argument happened between us recently and I got fed up with the treatment I was getting so I wrote him a letter of what I’m looking for and need in a relationship and I read it to him. I also suggested we go on a break for a month in which we are doing now. He said he is going to work on himself because he wants a future with me and I want the same. I have no friends and with this whole corona virus I can’t go to college anymore and try to make some. So everyday I’m sitting alone at home thinking and crying and it’s breaking my heart. I just want to go back to him and cut off the break and continued to be treated bad because it feels better than being alone and dealing with this. I just don’t know what to do anymore and I need help getting my mind off of him and being happy. I play video games but I find myself zoning out and thinking about our relationship. I honestly wish I had friends. I am at such a road block and need help, please anyone have any advice?

TL;DR I’m on a month break with my boyfriend and I can’t get my mind off of him no matter what I do. (Side note I also don’t have any friends)",3.642839723444375,5.150799700900902,4.7518290383406665,83.98306725329985,72.7117117117117,7.3970249319086525,28.222292059501363,7.97965635744439,1.7637131782945743,2194,85,439,31,43,720,244,555,0.078,0.81,0.11199999999999999,0.9399,2,2,1,1,0,0,42.0,10,1,0,12,28,30,4,3,19,0,40,8,2,4,1,103,97,54,1,12,5,2,2,0,3,0,3,1,1,2,24,59,1,2,14,4,0,8,13,12,4,4,15,8,70,18,63,77,9,59,0,3,5,2,74,27,0,4,18,300,94,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072936804001535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287311813542475,0.06858080381493371,0.19879586113341227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452423636788922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3697989845056048,0.04345465522615353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04778723750644656,0.10378036471636766,0.07576851728102903,0.0,0.0,0.07001843217041995,0.0,0.0549640063867696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574332771610703,0.05353417192177402,0.06515998884440109,0.0,0.06970318961753609,0.04961935433803332,0.0,0.06826560503166669,0.0,0.06407086917726904,0.0,0.06307793722275075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051915877227704736,0.06990705502394229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04104753367214621,0.0,0.05236156142019805,0.059384159791818575,0.1117075042348423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03142341063780405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05680126849824507,0.05286224031498478,0.0,0.0,0.14404394638559315,0.0,0.19481557965907687,0.05961710348586236,0.1765979745170196,0.0,0.09940932995318152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991284412135588,0.06615667949779118,0.05567154074756613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14728908280355513,0.12496755234481464,0.0,0.06233854808983527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486536325432206,0.0,0.0,0.06875649170033421,0.0,0.06830877558870463,0.050658132100470564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043896292124476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05218786130888761,0.0,0.06784083528967179,0.0,0.11218025962282416,0.0,0.0414836316531844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06260660440889244,0.06262959898922701,0.0,0.1255015881580314,0.0,0.0992103485187993,0.0,0.04568522499076954,0.18432497022882668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633732766088862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801386620651118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10852879607892003,0.0,0.0682187873061374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610102666880875,0.0621638576820843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06136270433812601,0.3336133143804851,0.0,0.0,0.059116066388707006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04952314452460319,0.05657633096390347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04784382747578237,0.0,0.0,0.04398799464693325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496957957893293,0.0,0.0,0.07052372430121866,0.0,0.0,0.0934536792859313,0.0,0.05431925203604178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257546355200868,0.2389278823385262,0.0,0.0,0.03623843868676028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04219376059249914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14951047385769867,0.0,0.0,0.10255563281639424,0.21993560552708954,0.04932942749498349,0.0,0.0,0.2235106093963244,0.0,0.0,0.06938495054968698,0.07146602873214143,0.0,0.0,0.0452437851497188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04002065606722723
mentalhealth,tantamle,2020/03/21,"CONFESSION: Hearing successful people claim to have mental illness makes me insecure. I know it's not good, but when I hear someone who is kicking ass or very well-adjusted in life claim they suffer from mental illness, all I hear is:  


""I have it just as bad as you do with mental health, only I'm managing to completely crush it in life hahaha wooooo!""  


Granted, I know this isn't what's literally being said, but ideas like this make me very insecure about my position in the hierarchy of life.",7.661808510638296,7.208185819148937,8.186680851063834,69.85300000000002,63.14893617021277,12.200851063829784,35.821276595744685,11.602472056035307,4.305274893617021,393,16,70,11,5,131,66,94,0.258,0.628,0.114,-0.948,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,1,3,7,0,2,1,0,7,7,1,2,1,13,16,6,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,7,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,4,10,3,11,14,1,4,1,1,0,1,8,3,1,1,2,43,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13300344458344138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16701623643373315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336078560656044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16932157441631634,0.5386061591840285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17982300708001545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17508711736377475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33754119517420644,0.07782277295734355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126593375840785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4815912386439932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211499082700698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043407738107396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152462571142575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13496889178135868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628676910761288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322401463851647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jerry5young,2020/03/21,"Support-Aid-Supply #pandemic Posting this for anyone who may need assistance in our country's current state of affairs.Weather its through donations,advice,sales,or trade.

I infact am looking for a mask suited for outside use that will be effective.Though due to me being out of a job due to the pandemic,I have a limited budget,and am hoping to find some helpful individuals who can work with me or others on obtaining needed supplies,supplies that some areas may be sold out.

I Myself am not a fan of recieving handouts as I feel overly guilty recieving without giving.

 If anyone can work with me on talking business id greatly appreciate it.

Stay safe everyone",7.003934426229511,8.236420991803278,7.767336065573769,66.53657786885249,64.49180327868852,10.034426229508195,39.02049180327869,10.125756701596842,4.543652459016394,539,29,79,12,8,180,89,122,0.076,0.825,0.1,0.5852,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,5,0,12,0,0,1,0,20,20,3,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,2,2,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,8,3,20,13,2,13,0,0,1,0,6,7,0,7,3,58,16,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31139732638281103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21277431028301347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125905384304152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20351977312272151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136089509348085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24549859511790514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925352064220354,0.0,0.0,0.22116527672296013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22096933742364855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869898679053799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302195277820444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21325989947366755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373405894624389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25268753232151553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17897672525253808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187758284738052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923186251900232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146495485500132,0.0,0.3242182835817625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hobo96,2020/03/21,"Mental illness Sometimes the reason why mental health is taken as a joke is bc so many people claim to have mental illness but really they just use it as an excuse to be lazy, complain about their life but not doing anything bout it, and bitch bout stupid shit and just to get a prescription for drugs.",7.888735632183909,7.201990862068968,7.208620689655174,77.81511494252874,62.793103448275865,9.11264367816092,29.67816091954023,7.793537801064563,1.942188505747125,242,6,43,2,3,75,45,58,0.332,0.627,0.040999999999999995,-0.9746,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,2,0,4,5,3,0,4,0,5,6,1,2,0,9,8,7,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,2,1,7,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,28,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572528736241886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26173106974065324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791475590114968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399000441904873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15941293545047286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288162661705578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6823333637825676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15646641684724602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14458407559390374,0.23204896690747864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316695966735697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22321516081291887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19492542604175667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036519275733691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChoosinganameIRL,2020/03/21,"I don't know what to do. I'm starting to feel jealous of my friends for things as small as a meaningless pumpkin drawing and I don't know why. Maybe it's because I feel ignored? Everyone got compliments except for me. Was it that bad? Probably. And I'm probably overreacting too. Logically thinking, its probably because I don't get a lot of praise from my accomplishments. Emotionally speaking, I'm probably just not liked as much in my friend group. I want to believe the logic but the emotional aspect is just so easy to fall under. I always dish out praise and compliments but never receive anything. I have to scream to get noticed while others only have to whisper. I have to step out of my comfort zone to do things when other people can just do it in their's. Why? Why is everything a struggle for me to do? One simple thing like playing a video game causes me to get upset because I'm not even good at that.",3.01677292145909,5.335663145251399,4.469543213933619,81.77222806441014,76.76536312849161,7.340256325994085,28.965165954650026,8.313332769828598,2.3421098258297737,729,33,134,14,17,242,103,179,0.11599999999999999,0.706,0.17800000000000002,0.9193,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,3,7,17,1,2,6,0,14,1,0,1,1,25,29,11,0,1,8,0,2,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,12,5,1,1,7,3,0,3,6,6,0,1,2,5,16,11,28,27,2,14,2,0,0,0,9,7,0,1,6,95,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545283619312756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10429127935431448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058175920466252,0.2317676009387864,0.0,0.0,0.1427858133164811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019072323266329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851173726329305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370660836489117,0.0,0.0,0.121099763178828,0.11390034274763845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816103148885188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958287401420513,0.0,0.19863984472430507,0.0,0.0,0.10629846205603087,0.10136075308044358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13929937841719714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12383165663910267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774471040083787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732133206885435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316406844095623,0.0,0.09774506975841156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14428749316404355,0.0,0.0,0.0858782348357675,0.0963869139627106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786139475526629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.546562726245657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897029738760246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248988835438158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525893045111642,0.08120602662799847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475099374786501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430731545158975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maris9495,2020/03/21,"How to survive quarantine with bad parents? Sorry for my bad English, I'm not native speaker.
So, I am a girl with BPD and anxiety and I have been going to therapist but now everything is cancelled due to this Corona epidemic.

I'm living with my parents and my brother who is total opposite and flegmatic and doesn't stress about anything.

I don't have a loving relationship with my father for as long as I can remember, he is always making fun of me, saying ugly words, laughing in my face, etc. He roll his eyes when he sees me and so on. He sure does love my brother and always having fun with him. 

My mother is a women with depression and very manipulative and self loving. She has to be always right and always yells and if I want to tell her my own opinion and my emotions she tells me that she is sick and suicidal and that I don't have a reason to be feeling low beacuse I have a great parents and a great life and she starts screeming whenever I want to tell her that she hurt me with something. Beside this, she is having a lover and I have been living with that information for a years now, without telling anyone to keep her safe at home and to keep family going. And few weeks ago she told me that she doesn't have any emotions towards me and that when I was younger she had a struggle to hug me or show me any kind of emotions because it wasn't natural to her.
And then I told her I know everything about her and her cheating my father and lying to me and everything else and she blamed me and told me Im bad daughter, I should be ashamed of talking like that to my mother, she is perfect mother to me, etc.

She even had purposely made panic attack and ended up in hospital blaming me I almost killed her and forbidding me to talk about what I have told to her about her been a cheater. I am a student on my last year, have no money, I found I job but now that agency won't opet because of virus, and Im forced to be in quarantine with my family.

I'm doing my faculty tasks daily to distract myself and been praying alot and working out in my room but they are yelling all the time and whenever I step up out of my room they just put down my will to live and my positive mindset that I'm struggling to get in my room with these chores and routines I'm doing for myself and for my mental and psychical health.

This qurantine would totally work out for me if I lived alone because I can focus on getting better and eating healthy and working out and praying and everything good. Because otherwise I go out few times a week and drink too much alcohol and eating crap and I even had a drug problem years ago that I still struggle in my mind.

Sorry for the long post but since I don't have a therapist right now to talk to and my friends are great but they don't get me because they dont have mental disorders or any kind of struggles of this kind.. I just need to tell this to someone and to maybe have some helping words.

How to survive this quarantine?
I hope you and me survive and make the best of us 🙏 stay safe people, sending you love and prayers 🙏",4.51073562857815,5.163312308681674,5.370636812799,83.57850796016001,69.80385852090032,8.254787859775702,29.800956787702926,8.331364938255728,2.0460157948396205,2424,91,489,34,41,793,259,622,0.177,0.6659999999999999,0.157,-0.8938,4,4,4,0,1,0,36.0,1,2,4,9,20,45,4,8,18,0,53,17,3,7,5,112,86,66,2,9,13,11,1,1,2,4,5,4,5,3,20,63,4,5,6,2,1,6,12,20,0,0,15,7,99,25,77,63,12,56,2,3,2,6,73,25,1,9,24,354,119,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10388376862686696,0.0626213831397597,0.05867550414844444,0.06068786124313585,0.0,0.0,0.1950265111470129,0.0,0.0,0.1195420194489008,0.0,0.04482583639570106,0.0,0.0,0.04097173752295562,0.0,0.04821957637602164,0.0,0.0,0.06666149363202026,0.0,0.0,0.14677582324838526,0.17859811488467753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06149296480601449,0.051823465890333736,0.0,0.0,0.07379970423041222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05046871286616678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715617758477654,0.0,0.05127781942408188,0.0,0.06867416258797564,0.05740184497960533,0.06795284307575136,0.11991682491115885,0.04894950112887572,0.19773809005300289,0.05189872952486748,0.0,0.130700223861565,0.0774043087824413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106494928580079,0.0,0.1104783277198212,0.0,0.029627935741929068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424757093141252,0.045271181590453326,0.0,0.09184209095243452,0.0,0.0999044979831138,0.04914760698591787,0.0,0.19380713607784636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622848868225518,0.0,0.0,0.03927571339910487,0.0,0.05877664007702586,0.058199123109652764,0.0,0.0,0.0627283093680144,0.0,0.12658763059423106,0.0,0.05814756214324963,0.1041657661918695,0.06482787439652478,0.18305638288766815,0.0322028699729557,0.04776362120517999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041388140115137036,0.028627082063077007,0.0,0.2069656282732352,0.10371136355197233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21154097891712628,0.05544502222312804,0.07822666909897806,0.0,0.058867632404175224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810212174506828,0.0,0.059165331101628124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043074856704246094,0.04344824656781994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874986787061628,0.19519201813865214,0.0,0.0,0.04062313993207412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05611884165418654,0.0,0.0,0.05606852945824898,0.0,0.058905238937906064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060246523463106064,0.0,0.0629102547463494,0.06637792947208215,0.10008145444500212,0.0,0.046597950095936216,0.0,0.0,0.0466934846960249,0.0,0.061128484743001685,0.0,0.0,0.04847127811197165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04964826353727248,0.04511012068165113,0.0,0.1311870155216579,0.04147460292702125,0.062455618665423374,0.04679490056571972,0.0,0.06712160504639947,0.2450293573962333,0.0,0.06409459467172057,0.0,0.055226106498648064,0.0,0.0,0.14129191464059876,0.25607775798489235,0.0,0.0,0.13606911692868698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833568419256739,0.0,0.0,0.223964239996757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048386254533605,0.0,0.0,0.04834789791088922,0.06912296549672305,0.0,0.09400447256114924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056484524544700876,0.0,0.12797591972955769,0.0,0.0,0.041624969924159885,0.0,0.0,0.11320185195458915
mentalhealth,morguebabii,2020/03/21,"Losing hope When times get tough like this, how does one keep the mental capacity to keep pushing?? Cause at this rate, I’m not gonna be around for my 20th birthday. 
I want to keep going but it’s so hard. I’m losing all my hope. I’m scared that if I do what I want to truly do I’ll disappoint my family but that’s all I have. I’m so lost. I honestly wish my mom aborted me.",-1.081428571428571,0.8363899047619051,1.87409523809524,96.58757142857144,90.42857142857143,5.2647619047619045,15.542857142857144,6.742157984588678,-0.4255199999999997,288,6,72,4,10,101,55,84,0.207,0.564,0.22899999999999998,0.294,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,6,10,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,2,2,17,20,7,0,6,4,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,6,0,1,1,1,10,4,6,17,2,6,0,4,0,0,1,2,0,3,3,38,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16446940406956076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18979229759338745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616786583987692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741687537466894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652585475552794,0.0,0.10499942849446148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550246337443728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3670029751668575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4926510580441733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026101877600716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4133828592848511,0.2016798027690836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618764226178516,0.0,0.0,0.2163805650771521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251934630827488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18497005557760515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773100206975206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21794429738964466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21245691504011066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SensitiveArmadillo6,2020/03/21,"I think I have a mood/emotinal disorder... I have been diagnosed with ASD at age 6. As a child I had no friends and would watch TV all day, I was also very fat. Each time I think about my childhood I feel so sad even tho there really didn't happen anything bad to me. I feel like I was wasted, and left alone, and deep down it's still haunting me. Because of my autism and of this """"""traumatic"""""" past I'm a very empathic person but sometimes it takes another level. Last day I spended 4 hours crying about Britney Spears and her life. The other day I wanted to kill myself thinking about how hard my mom's life has been (she grew up very poor) I use others as an excuse for crying and I exaggerate things. Life is a game and I need to win. I'm in constent competition. I feel so sad and angry at life until... euphoria kicks in. I start laughing for no reason and I imagine funny things, I go wild and become unstoppable. Suddenly life is so fun and I feel like I'm never going to die. It changes every hour. I go from happiest person on Earth, who believes in everyone, to rejected victim who feels like nothing is going to be okay. During my sadness ""episodes"" (which last for around 1 hour) I hear sad musics and feel like I'm trapped. Trapped in one of these sad 90's Vaporwave videoclips, assisting to my family's sad life. Everything and every breath I take makes me wanna cry. I want to die. Once I was passing an exam that I knew I was failing and during it I was thinking non-stop about my big brother who dropped-out of school and I thought I was going to end up like him. I kept crying that day. But when the laughter kicks in, nothing makes sens, the music I hear becomes happy and silly, like that: https://youtu.be/wkEVwEwT9GE and suddenly I feel very powerful. My sexual urges also increase. My emotions varie, but it's ALWAYS extreme. I've been like that since forever but recently I enterred adulthood (I'm 19) and I feel so lost and alone, yet I don't want any sign of affection from others. I really don't know what to do and there's even any case similar to mine...",1.9500253392645988,4.310634835351088,3.4129568106312327,87.70032265330255,80.79176755447942,6.4568725716538085,23.648234697899646,7.65591337171366,1.2757887155808318,1629,58,321,27,43,534,217,413,0.201,0.609,0.19,-0.8053,1,5,0,0,0,2,68.0,0,0,0,4,20,26,2,0,9,1,22,9,2,6,2,59,62,36,3,6,4,2,9,7,1,1,8,2,0,3,21,23,1,1,17,2,2,9,6,12,0,1,15,12,52,14,42,45,3,48,0,9,1,0,16,16,0,0,30,191,73,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14770628794832866,0.0,0.11404928626695501,0.05933361594674918,0.0,0.0,0.09698319446950447,0.07477221134192298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05868005962847021,0.06347886113479026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059538847825824685,0.04346843675788392,0.15750723169976075,0.0,0.08033922003243797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543396084895973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31331209758812745,0.183949950755994,0.0,0.0,0.07237568909564585,0.1480120127050483,0.0,0.08172466042348821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021142578169446,0.0631573475347967,0.0,0.0,0.094195963469991,0.0,0.12015941727859672,0.06813744512793984,0.06408665178444872,0.0,0.06722243687603766,0.0,0.28844202569468075,0.20376858748785556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055092056687999484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20262869493383887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305705436794347,0.07590824110217498,0.06387758227401519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16073764229763504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21067079699115815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788912682581495,0.0,0.03918877916896417,0.1162503842230092,0.0,0.0,0.07747589046848256,0.0,0.30219990042161776,0.2438609598196443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784064316458453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519672200080344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351457172539307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052873664411120264,0.05499679893969283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684308558140393,0.0,0.0,0.07594024170387201,0.048319859264840136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807115035288176,0.0,0.12452605060933418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136291883206722,0.07331606486242573,0.07040762914552666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216707430877115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05898636412104723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052501645035042,0.0,0.050471869637472896,0.0,0.056946322673839325,0.059616326863656616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722884632319944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474717056558164,0.1827640628909384,0.0,0.056610250576781415,0.04158002127499201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06158685112660511,0.0,0.2353448740568336,0.12617716833763226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05065485640387338,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheLittlestA,2020/03/21,"To tell or not to tell (that I slipped up), that is the question. First time poster on here, long time mental health fighter. I’ve been struggling with Major Depressive Disorder for most of my life (having suicidal thoughts since I was 10) and didn’t start getting treatment until I was 22. Since starting treatment I have worked really hard to shed my bad coping skills, including self-harm; I’ve been clean of cutting for well over a year and a half at this point. 

For the past few weeks I’ve been unable to cry although I’ve felt like I really needed to. For the past week I’ve been working 11-13 hour days as I’m considered essential personal at a medical facility. I felt so overtired, horrible, and emotionally constipated last night that I cut. It was just a few, and they weren’t deep as I don’t want them noticed at work- I just wanted to try anything to get myself to cry and express myself instead of being so stoic and not letting my feelings out. 

I’m trying to decide whether I should tell my partner and/or my therapist. The marks have faded pretty much over night, so at this point there’s no evidence for anyone to call me out on. Do I keep this quiet and pretend it never happened, or do I let the people who are the most active in my treatment know I slipped up? I can’t figure out what I should do, so I appreciate any advice.",6.945413533834586,6.205584142857141,7.257593984962408,76.8703007518797,64.71428571428572,10.156390977443607,34.03759398496241,9.424239791934726,2.9687172932330825,1066,40,205,17,14,348,156,266,0.132,0.794,0.075,-0.9336,1,0,0,0,1,0,30.0,0,0,2,5,10,7,2,1,10,0,24,3,0,0,1,35,40,18,1,5,7,0,4,1,1,2,3,1,1,2,10,11,0,1,8,1,0,0,8,5,1,2,12,5,27,2,36,23,6,36,0,1,0,0,11,17,0,5,20,139,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867554638446332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562829868373816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776235044203032,0.0,0.09151839348325363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092857773788282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135603743465237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24432336991203346,0.07172284793633855,0.0,0.095787144346959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745913479428864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509906896857195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0562323704418685,0.0,0.21356283866613066,0.0,0.0,0.09459727698059417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620785926673805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834482701753204,0.0,0.09962453593819967,0.0,0.0,0.11821366359246545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10952188879004436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09885076035811746,0.0,0.0,0.06111946945557487,0.09065301290814433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274445872779715,0.07855266216068857,0.054332799195409065,0.0,0.0,0.0984195433843966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120348714468628,0.11207602037797128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175396760752729,0.08246264327466156,0.08577391907148292,0.0,0.0,0.20873075374107572,0.0,0.0,0.12661614332332885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123297884254438,0.07710072929378911,0.09710644613124524,0.0,0.0,0.21026347753422975,0.0,0.0,0.11314307174158107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458342754010762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249112234021896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601886910244692,0.0,0.0,0.183992222092335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743352868294105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162634288316171,0.0,0.12164840042504205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291613823001873,0.0,0.0,0.12912625866815888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829028498392706,0.12969778054692074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510119447771524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119200189000904,0.0,0.1784158832493414,0.0,0.0999933738107765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428920255719023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161718959276539
mentalhealth,00rkk00,2020/03/21,"TW su!cidal thoughts mentioned, bad English I feel ashamed writing this because I feel my struggles aren’t enough to warrant this, but I can’t go on like this. 
I told my mom I “didn’t want to grow up” on my 5th birthday, I spent my early childhood (3-6) being a cheerful, mature kid who spent their free time in a dark room (my choice), rocking back and forth and crying, which I found out my parents thought was cute.
I was a straight A student through elementary/middle/high school, extremely depressed and extremely isolated (although I had friends). I got bullied but protected others from bullying and had an active after school life.
I’m 19 and a freshman in engineering, something I’m good at but have no interest in and i simply want to d!e. I’m studying something that I have zero interest in (but would know what else to do as I have zero interest in general), to do a job that I don’t care about, not even for me, but to support my disabled mom and old dad, who I feel don’t love me a lick (family is a completely different crazy story), while feeling like su!cidal 24/7 for 12-15 years. 
I just wish I could fall asleep and not wake up.
And now I’m stuck in quarantine with my older cousin, who’s constantly suggesting some courses I can take to better myself while class is out, and I cannot tell her that I have no energy todo my regular class work or exist.
I can’t dump that on her, especially since we’ll be stuck here alone for months to come (and we’re on different sides of a family cold war), so I’m just dumping it here to get it off my chest. I feel ashamed of myself, I think I’m lazy and whiny and just using this to excuse my unwillingness to do anything, but I just don’t know what to do. That’s it and sorry if you read this mess.",7.280669428334716,5.58953703380282,7.678061309030657,77.20842584921294,64.5774647887324,11.169842584921293,36.09362054681027,10.056822442137396,3.3361068765534387,1377,54,284,25,17,455,195,355,0.163,0.639,0.198,0.9448,5,2,2,0,0,0,50.0,1,1,1,2,11,23,3,3,10,0,28,5,3,1,0,52,62,27,1,6,14,5,5,2,1,2,1,0,1,1,20,18,0,1,11,2,3,4,12,9,0,2,14,7,44,15,39,43,2,36,0,1,0,1,22,19,0,3,15,183,64,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12575015851302446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991486350825124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336126070029148,0.10137712694261797,0.07401394874305531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738241415849653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379150673535674,0.0,0.0,0.1045889664680602,0.12730216315411735,0.1312073531444542,0.0,0.09694064185041737,0.0,0.13336956226785004,0.0,0.0,0.10457525628465957,0.0,0.0,0.25370735165279124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10142732665151884,0.0,0.0,0.12545498467563027,0.0,0.08019399513839359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22892003340441855,0.0,0.3069573996877904,0.08673947647217571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312616498930754,0.09380555096947522,0.0,0.06343474767914714,0.0,0.06900340090093189,0.10183781801527944,0.09710731205741134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828246582940367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048645325240585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334539039841849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575957487093706,0.118635260279648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095825058171652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844014504322086,0.09691293842818273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274054646560273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13481788460175184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121448663409555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24575855665464574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043640986934166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18694363947125905,0.0,0.13591505499433762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269301632227397,0.0,0.0,0.1377812184509168,0.0,0.0,0.09128957615554002,0.0,0.10612276655869904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779834629335404,0.0,0.19278117627551813,0.07079853320982926,0.0,0.0,0.11601800633576745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486427353990334,0.0,0.0,0.14322837697771698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962218550038374,0.0,0.0,0.08839215323675173,0.0,0.0,0.08625030539620501,0.0,0.0,0.07818779865618014
mentalhealth,rogue_97,2020/03/21,"Need help Hi

Im not sure if this is serious or not. I get sudden attacks like palpitations, cold hands and worries of the future. It all started after my ex left me. It’s like half of me was taken away. I hate myself for this feeling that my ex still has a hold on me. Please help on how to stop this?",-0.5564230769230747,1.5442297230769242,1.9202884615384617,95.76658653846157,90.23076923076924,4.480769230769232,17.35576923076923,5.985473137389443,-0.4405000000000001,232,6,54,2,8,79,51,65,0.156,0.626,0.218,0.5816,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,2,0,2,0,3,1,1,1,2,12,9,4,0,2,4,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,3,8,3,8,7,1,10,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,8,36,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009314743641685,0.248526723288632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13375005418274707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13820160302023007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611602870996623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3546064660699369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857286885984989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874034606589498,0.0,0.0,0.2584637559890427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961393930110132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903652504066567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18722972930060205,0.0,0.21124726814105624,0.22115187768458325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24930844999920354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26863449533475364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TGWecho,2020/03/21,"What is this called? I am diagnosed with bpd, mdd, and social anxiety. But that's not what this question is. I talked to a few of my therapist but none can put a name on it. 

Sometimes I get in these ""episodes"" which are sorta like an anxiety or panic attack but worse. I get physically cold and I start shaking(not like a sezure) just like an increasing shiver till my whole body starts shaking. Then it all stops. Everything feels like it is going slow. I often start moving my head back and forth. I just stare an empty stare. I've been told it's dissociation. But im almost like playing a movie in my head with a different ending each time of the situation I am in. It normally ends with me falling asleep. Does this like mental movie with the supposed dissociation have a name? Thank you in advance!",2.6487822580645144,5.157577954838715,3.794576612903228,85.11186491935486,79.12903225806451,6.971774193548387,23.235887096774192,8.07648339933343,1.4051370967741934,633,21,123,12,16,205,98,155,0.149,0.72,0.131,-0.4509,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,1,4,11,1,2,11,0,9,5,4,0,1,26,18,10,0,1,8,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,13,8,0,1,2,1,0,7,2,3,0,0,2,4,14,8,13,16,6,23,0,0,2,0,8,5,0,5,17,79,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665493765001066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20879826996515052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525426475916895,0.0,0.1049369645133132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158734480807826,0.17187911934564226,0.0,0.1393510728900843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851412229099566,0.0,0.14258204718668982,0.0,0.0,0.11942576920171527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417437310599931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12265038762892586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900330504649235,0.09749415652905433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425998281554237,0.0,0.07755901513459752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801150718892229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14741095979637894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.400033932852223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752960726656271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14504595497996492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371157154563829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16011807727355692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371899887549912,0.15287757188138856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15339793691675555,0.0,0.13911392365125155,0.0,0.0,0.1349722658981358,0.0,0.2897823900777491,0.0,0.0,0.11409498538687195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109689373023612,0.0,0.1256431907533998,0.0,0.1584521254639675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957672284315333,0.0,0.0,0.1304028814782678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15236382083413527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907453369752545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DauntlessMage,2020/03/21,"I really want my friend with an eating disorder to get help... A friend of mine thinks that she has an eating disorder but she never got diagnosed. She had a doctor's appointment the other day about her mood lately and she failed to mention her eating disorder. I must mention that she's my internet friend, I can't physically help her. On top of that, she has diabetes type 1, depression and anxiety. She eats 500 calories a day. She's aware of her condition, she's aware that she's starving herself. She has been feeling very shitty the past three weeks or so. I really don't know how to communicate with her, how to help her out. I just feel like she doesn't want to get out of this mindset nor help herself. I can't just let this happen, I can't let my friend eat 500 calories a day. She's aware that she is not overweight, yet she thinks that she still looks fat. She has a lifestyle that is rather unhealthy, especially for a person in her shoes. She drinks alcohol to the point of getting wasted and has a nicotine addiction. She wakes up around 3 pm every day... She has been feeling really shitty for a very long time now... I really want for her to get help, how can I help someone who is so unenthusiastic about getting help?",3.215097001763666,5.18587148559671,4.413392122281014,84.03074074074075,74.88477366255144,7.920752498530277,25.151675485008816,8.704169506293173,1.8165329805996469,973,33,193,20,21,319,115,243,0.21600000000000005,0.6729999999999999,0.111,-0.9871,0,0,2,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,2,14,8,0,0,13,0,21,15,3,3,2,28,38,11,0,5,6,0,3,1,4,1,7,0,0,1,11,8,9,0,6,1,0,0,8,2,0,1,4,4,43,5,25,31,0,21,0,2,1,0,45,8,0,1,14,133,54,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848762353897456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654960211717434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911244133518027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042476550200035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330560345473377,0.0,0.07781262409549866,0.09169663285551373,0.0,0.0,0.31062403449551257,0.09247028150815474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850212204996469,0.0,0.4622191794489511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611819733949045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13704098811034834,0.06454133144648913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791962969056444,0.0,0.2360034462795939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722558570593345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989035594101633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4238868606849506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049650361059270336,0.0,0.10191127202033304,0.0,0.0,0.18476446179782685,0.0,0.044137213909778684,0.0,0.0,0.07995105173279766,0.0758656888391324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967838708847485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624298241515722,0.0,0.07888435803755398,0.0,0.0,0.08540369926427803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315051401771364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654765592823133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07214834301327303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157767848810756,0.0,0.0,0.052679953622807967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908550633830764,0.1598606054653823,0.0,0.07246801306478311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shocksurprise,2020/03/21,"Stop trying to get me to buy a fucking gun. I'm losing my shit. Covid swept in and my MIL has lost her fucking mind thinking it's a huge conspiracy and we need to protect ourselves. She tried to tell me to get a gun despite telling her multiple times it's not safe and I live in a gun free home because safety. She then told my boyfriend (her son) some very misinformed and panicked info....AT WORK. But then also said that we needed to get a gun. Again. After I already said bad idea. I love her to pieces but like.....



My house CANNOT have a gun due to SAFETY reasons. NOT EVERY HOME IS SAFE WITH A GUN. STOP SAYING I SHOULD GET A GUN.  IT WILL TAKE MY SAFETY FROM A 7 TO A 2 MAYBE.",-0.2646309246309251,1.9384350349650392,1.701340326340329,97.01474553224556,90.25874125874122,4.016938616938616,18.433954933954933,5.46131890053228,-0.4785770007770007,522,15,118,3,18,172,86,143,0.25,0.599,0.151,-0.8831,0,0,0,7,0,0,23.0,2,0,0,3,2,11,3,0,10,0,6,4,1,1,0,23,22,9,0,3,4,1,0,1,0,2,0,3,2,0,4,7,0,5,3,0,2,0,3,6,0,0,4,3,19,6,14,16,2,11,0,2,0,3,16,3,3,1,9,67,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16625965313430185,0.12048462936424065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579677169179956,0.0918423720698732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693953052496726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785698354534024,0.3148594446018343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022532488910585,0.0,0.0,0.1738441271958189,0.0,0.17007945799769042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360601548928992,0.0,0.13303761807493966,0.0,0.0,0.16855263521364008,0.16446575595758842,0.0,0.13597865594967945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15136058411444714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15212602765101074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234284516184251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15490599179581938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866287983142761,0.11981275035203418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465274041045593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519209468584381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132793393916146,0.0,0.2633710746930753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653835240570773,0.0,0.0,0.0878524297039147,0.0,0.0,0.14396433490780675,0.0,0.20457969607562732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431221996926818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096839874576847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Momomia16,2020/03/21,"Cant care or focus on conversation I used to be a really personable and ok conversationalist, but for the past year I find myself tuning out of conversation. Like I cant bring myself to care about what someone is saying, I even struggle with it in videogames where I just skip dialogue completely. In books I find myself skipping about or being unable to focus. I have depression and anxiety, but this doesn't feel like that. I get so annoyed with the person talking and the intrusive thought that pops into my head is ""just leave me alone"" on repeat even if they are a friend of mine. I know it's not good for me, and itll get worse if its unaddressed, but I dont even know where to start :(",6.048529411764704,6.151108558823534,6.657647058823527,77.60941176470591,66.35294117647058,10.03529411764706,29.5,9.827888789773867,2.5569588235294107,548,17,108,11,8,180,87,136,0.248,0.69,0.062,-0.9802,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,0,10,10,1,1,5,1,11,1,1,1,0,25,22,12,0,2,10,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,2,8,8,0,0,6,1,0,1,5,3,0,0,1,2,18,7,18,18,0,13,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,4,6,79,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17611235620464652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13008175778123693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3467385518568393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828592956165432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14645703037494495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19928810038790612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369336533080475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597840599599578,0.1214781258179502,0.0,0.0,0.3108308375765136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137412152524858,0.0,0.17767998086244552,0.0,0.0,0.1426232642048978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17451227416036216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18690140635432426,0.0,0.0,0.18005005488356288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16614798314259252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16232444596265969,0.0,0.2969484439192022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893333742757087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135224320277559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407613802681593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035668903978695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17776494584920755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667341645325642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499445085100367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686179733831628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17328744925903325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950155141449132
mentalhealth,INTLHelper,2020/03/21,"I don't know what's happening.... Paranoia/Depressed/Body Dysmorphia, getting flashbacks of bad memories from few years ago Been in the house for 3 days now(feels like a year). I live with my family(sister, dad, mom). I've been feeling super paranoid lately (like my dad, mom and sis are planning something or talking about me behind my back). My parents are hard core traditionalists and believe that things should work in a certain way only. My mom is a school teacher and is always on the edge - keeps telling me how I'm a failure, *used to* call me a retard, says everything bad in the house happens because of me(arguments etc), is always negative and keeps blaming me for things that happened years ago and all other negative stuff. 

My background - 

- Diagnosed with BDD/Major depressive disorder 5 years ago. 
- Drank toilet cleaner in a suicide attempt. 
- Parents sent me abroad to study, but I failed out of all subjects and had to come back home. 
- Been taunted by my mother since(6+ months), how I'm a failure and a disappointed and she wished she never had me.

I have been trying to make apps(mobile and web) to get enough capital to go back abroad to study and get away from my mother and I thought this time of quarantine would be perfect for me to work on it. I've previously made 3 apps and a mobile game hoping to make it work, but it didn't. 

Anyways, all this stuff is very soul crunching. To add on top of this - I have no friends here. 

I'm currently taking Prodep and Abilify but idk what to do in regards to the situation with my mother - even listening to her voice gives me anxiety now and makes me think she's going to say something terrible that will bring back bad memories. 

Maybe my feelings are intensified rn because she just said that I'm a worthless loser and she's going to kick me out of the house. But I can't hide my feelings.",6.972698863636364,6.989639508522727,6.929113636363637,76.73179545454545,64.42613636363637,9.88090909090909,36.065909090909095,9.516144504307137,3.3195097727272724,1465,65,271,25,20,467,190,352,0.166,0.7659999999999999,0.068,-0.9876,3,1,2,0,0,1,57.0,0,0,0,10,12,16,0,0,15,0,23,2,0,7,6,53,59,22,1,4,6,11,4,2,1,3,1,5,1,0,17,22,1,2,6,1,0,6,7,9,0,0,12,9,34,7,43,43,6,37,1,5,0,0,28,12,0,2,20,173,51,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247162602867876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406239197936382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464336345780304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939187608251942,0.2599055380420491,0.2116654958829404,0.1030225761005623,0.0,0.0,0.0952041760295244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938620404054826,0.0,0.0,0.08628540892194195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279050057605464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054496432394181164,0.0,0.07278095873673425,0.08576717376815315,0.0,0.0,0.09684596083667966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873125669244388,0.09424143255818468,0.055812398252352916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594443753830331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17090585007833853,0.06036783922176647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528559600945973,0.0,0.13244553015707258,0.08106147251089428,0.14407233179504336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22417300920490926,0.0,0.07569668444254653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476182516233073,0.08392898762427804,0.0,0.2925099181351939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502175090356446,0.0,0.0,0.046439776598251915,0.0,0.0953212948404992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256626175155157,0.0,0.0746163117495248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995729721262633,0.16921608415800224,0.0,0.08489304524763742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29690116425194474,0.06744823606836257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517271296884394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06426714608901088,0.0,0.0,0.18765767820763693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038021155551042,0.13439785921000938,0.0,0.08551995953226735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498314896423256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13010665996759813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934678435094544,0.09243085042450996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353455981197499,0.0679190494155661,0.07385797528348753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227799200916982,0.05414510499452988,0.0,0.06708469734721463,0.04927346398405882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05737092485902495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298210529544642,0.0,0.06972253031678179,0.0,0.06707330274458931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717247542740906,0.0,0.0,0.1845541446208868,0.0,0.0,0.06002739214890905,0.0,0.0,0.21766460441546348
mentalhealth,babevlincoln,2020/03/21,"Having A Hard Time With Corona Virus Sorry in advance if this is sort of all over the place, I will try my best! 
So pretty much, I am feeling myself slowing going back into depression. I work a really good job and make really good money. However it's in the service industry, I'm a barber. So, things have been incredibly slow this week and my everything is starting to suffer because of it. I know a lot will have the thought of why don't you have savings. I do, just not a lot. I have had this job a little over a year and a half so, I have been replacing old things, moved etc... 
I have been applying for other jobs in case when/if my shop gets closed down. I am just so worried about what I'm going to do if I am jobless for any amount of time. My landlords are understanding but, other things are still worrying me. I lapsed a month back in the fall with my medicine, just birth control but it helps with depression, hormones etc... I fell into a terrible depression when I started taking it again and it lasted months. I am so worried I won't be able to afford it for even just a month. I don't know if I can handle a depression fall for that long again. 
Anyways, not really sure what I am wanting out of this or if it should be as big of a worry as I am making it. Thanks in advance for anyone taking the time to read this, I think typing this out has helped some.",3.0947822402982514,4.251966761565839,4.578037620742247,86.07326215895611,73.55516014234875,7.629961023555331,24.768852736824268,8.11559375814309,1.3343948822233522,1064,32,224,16,21,356,143,281,0.15,0.7879999999999999,0.063,-0.9787,6,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,0,5,18,12,0,0,18,0,33,0,0,3,2,43,52,19,0,6,13,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,22,12,0,1,6,2,2,8,5,6,0,1,5,2,28,6,33,41,9,46,0,5,0,0,3,16,0,9,22,173,50,7,0.0991831406225954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744793675817919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935115804620375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15253142585774945,0.0,0.060461121938905876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040865869699127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112423259218698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34170517473504713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22123083934673532,0.06550952896274681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913941142576254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050149976018714564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05181909734214133,0.0,0.11273612898438712,0.16638022528399812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884861244363126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296073693690078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952718885747944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901692044593053,0.08084749740485235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940756324980148,0.0,0.0877739583395788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16864391866931502,0.0,0.0,0.1324110330705827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23750110974779565,0.10541598201645204,0.07291102051603332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407602168332906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10362527189522214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009049109958782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992099809890392,0.0,0.19061777883689704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102740568367253,0.14040467485099242,0.0,0.07920778422129045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347893625254128,0.0,0.14914675650808398,0.0,0.0,0.09131451021008856,0.0,0.0,0.19767861442220908,0.06355255167126936,0.0,0.07874033479002474,0.17350346072017162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673388419304025,0.0,0.0,0.10325314726944416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05850078608577052,0.0,0.07955873277262948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08949735746123216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220650763875304,0.4029011750658473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387069071395128
mentalhealth,cocoa_cupcake,2020/03/21,"Is there anyone who doesn’t have mental health issues? It feels like everyone I know is either depressed, anxious, some are scarily deep into it, others just have occasional triggers. Are there people who are just honestly, genuinely happy with themselves and their lives?",7.430999999999997,10.576480488888894,6.628611111111113,67.57625000000003,66.33333333333333,8.944444444444445,31.25,9.516144504307137,3.7153333333333336,222,9,28,5,4,68,37,45,0.1,0.7190000000000001,0.18100000000000002,0.644,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,1,0,10,10,1,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,3,2,10,2,2,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3510666210042405,0.0,0.21728831218653005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676542929323372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969413468965552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15712792622787275,0.2220046507109248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33080628883435503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33031984364389305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243492607994489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17078375697553433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182002815541246,0.0,0.2744038620702846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3131696658612046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21543956993798632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OllyTheCrab,2020/03/21,"I’m terrified of my best friend dying Best friend isn’t the most accurate term, but let me explain. When I was 16, I(now 21m) met my best friend(now 21nb) online. We’ve been talking online every day without fail for around five years. Not only do we text, but we do phonecalls, video calls, play games, watch movies and even send each other gifts. The only thing we haven’t done is met each other in person.
At this point, we’re officially queerplatonic partners. Neither of us really have an interest in romantic relationships with anyone else. They’re seriously the most important person in the world to me, I love them more than anything. 
We’ve tried to meet up in person before, but it never seemed to work out. My mental health has always been a struggle for me, and lately with this whole Coronavirus thing, my anxiety is at an all time high. My partner, they have really bad asthma. Whether it’s realistic or not, my mind is constantly occupied by the fear that they will get Covid-19 and die. Their asthma has been acting up really badly in the past few days, too. 
I’ve worried myself past the point of tears, thinking about this. They’re my entire world. I can’t lose them. I don’t know how to rationalize this in my head and calm myself down. 
I don’t want to lose my best friend.",4.1607661290322575,6.02009225403226,4.662129032258068,83.72319354838713,72.0241935483871,7.863225806451613,24.093548387096767,8.548686976883017,1.535013870967742,1021,29,196,18,20,324,150,248,0.14,0.6809999999999999,0.179,0.9141,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,4,0,5,8,6,19,0,2,10,0,21,5,1,1,2,32,31,11,2,1,8,0,0,0,5,1,3,0,0,5,11,13,0,0,4,3,0,2,10,8,0,1,7,1,28,11,29,22,14,31,0,3,1,1,27,18,0,4,11,129,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551082307660318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861688429434355,0.0,0.0,0.07185745113033354,0.1052974858627565,0.08456892634890156,0.09148489565296272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17161320109626113,0.0,0.0,0.08744760455159857,0.0,0.43139275808664784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049371450780784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105519834485207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255311886067084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21331295640219228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051668701787196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08584909007707263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787698877177475,0.0,0.08658608200382885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564204987216666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175917757381733,0.0,0.05369179635616402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546914109725287,0.10923708589371553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857954486107467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056478350571333574,0.0,0.1159262576452147,0.0,0.0,0.10508676899735307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229941173316364,0.0,0.0,0.0927517141912985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035655058188602,0.0,0.10376591634326553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926065972672704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631868509767527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962064843534972,0.0,0.2691979473737009,0.0,0.0,0.1942970791845244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975065465845504,0.0,0.0,0.11033387474719257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355570574002524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074349425914139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826006532406201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654836992428554,0.06584928795109306,0.0,0.0,0.05992457708895192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977241158631274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12361669322642062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06061495576531994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114736284693935,0.0,0.09906423811821227,0.0,0.07481599067872771,0.1043654219817057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617892427377617
mentalhealth,JacelynAvowlin,2020/03/21,"I just need to vent a little... Warning: this may be triggering for some. Please proceed with caution.

Some backstory. Last year around mid february I went to a large party a group chat on telegram I was in was throwing. Typically this kind of thing isnt really advised, but I personally knew one of the guys who lived with the host so I thought it wouldn't be a big deal. After I got there however, there was this one guy who immediately took a liking to me. I had already stated in earlier conversation that I was straight and catholic, so while I didnt have an issue with how they wanted to live their lives (the majority of the group was LGBT), I wasnt interested in being in a homosexual relationship (or ""messing around and finding out"" either). Somewhat unbeknownst to me, the guy that had been flirty and crushing on me took this as a challenge. For the rest of the time I was interacting with people he would be nearby and as i got more drunk and stumble he began helping me to the liquor cabinet and even helping me pour. Once i was quite plastered and starting to slip in and out of reality, he got super physical with me and coaxed me to a quiet room. He was alone with me and started having sex with me. I wasnt okay with this, but I was far too drunk to really say or do anything about it. 

The next day was kind of a blur for me as I was still processing what had just happened to me, but over the rest of the week at work it began to weigh on me. I had just been raped. I knew nothing about this guy. Everyone at the party used pseudonyms, myself included, so there was no way for me to even identify him. But what was I supposed to do once i had a name, report him and lose my job for drinking so heavily i was still drunk the next morning when I'm in the navy? It's a serious offense and since I was still in training at a command that treats it like you just murdered someone, I couldnt take the risk. Even still, 4 days had passed and I hadnt slept or gotten any of my training or homework done for my classes.

Day five and I've finally had about 4 hours of sleep and the day comes that I am to stand watch as Reactor Operator. My overinstruct (OI) has been nagging me and criticizing everything I've done up to this point almost 2 hours into my 4 hour watch when the scram alarm goes off. I started having a panic attack. I'm shaking and stuttering and my arms wont respond as I'm trying to take the necessary actions to prevent core damage (dont worry it's a training simulation, but my body wouldn't accept that). Instead of taking the watch as he should have, OI starts screaming at me for not taking my actions.

It's been a year and that whole week (mostly the first day of the shitshow) still has me traumatized. I think about the party almost every day. Sometimes I can still feel his grip and his breath.

Now onto today's issue. I've since confided in a very close friend (who we'll call roomie) everything that happened and what things in my life it has effected. He's also in the navy and has been dealing with some things himself so he was very understanding and supportive. I explained how this event caused me to go mute for nearly 3 months before I felt comfortable speaking to anyone again (i had made an exception for important work related conversation with staff), how that incident led to my girlfriend (who I had planned on asking to marry) dumping me, and that I had been altogether removed from the program and placed on indefinite hold with the expectation that I spoke to mental health before they considered putting me back in the program. So with roomie being so understanding of what that incident did to me and how it continues to effect me, I would have never expected his behaviour last night.

I had some friends over. They were good friends, but I still hadnt known them for very long. While I was streaming on twitch one of my friends was hanging out in my room keeping me company and cracking jokes about my gaming and stuff, it was a fun time. The other was in the living room with roomie.

Roomie made some joke about being gay, I didnt hear much else, but then I hear roomie say: ""oh, but he's got a great story about why he KNOWS he's not gay"" I can basically hear the smile on his face from the tone in his voice. My heart sinks and my 4 hour stream is basically ruined barely an hour in. I cant think straight and suddenly my game is pissing me off so I had to call it by an hour and a half.

I can't fathom why he'd act like that. Hes been my best friend, we've been through everything together and confided or darkest secrets to one another. But now im not sure if he's actually kept this between us and the very few others who I trusted with it. Im teetering on the edge of an anxiety attack while the person I trusted and thought of like a brother tries to make my traumatic experience out to be some joke, egging my friends to ask me about it cuz it's ""his story to tell, but is a good one""

I still don't really know if I wasnt advice or if I just needed to rant but I'm rather shaken and not looking forward to hanging or with that friend abaddon tomorrow like we're had planned.",5.448328417221042,5.619569683852142,6.142988577883773,80.55233776829422,67.6284046692607,9.394903978913018,31.26936111459772,9.242435990724204,2.524112664742061,4057,151,822,71,62,1330,417,1028,0.11,0.768,0.122,0.9279999999999999,2,1,1,0,0,0,96.0,2,1,5,12,51,52,8,4,59,1,92,21,8,14,2,154,149,82,1,15,33,1,3,5,8,8,3,10,4,6,51,59,6,4,19,11,0,17,22,19,0,8,72,17,112,33,134,60,17,132,0,3,4,4,80,54,1,23,65,577,163,11,0.0,0.0,0.04868091072878957,0.0,0.0,0.048747391852764936,0.0,0.0,0.09990595482688217,0.051666183460117435,0.055049730057150206,0.039893300614428084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033923752249210626,0.05230914462168202,0.0381621602662007,0.0,0.0,0.03488100032162908,0.0,0.041051396908380285,0.08881708506212592,0.09327214636465717,0.11350358668660322,0.0,0.03835875899042712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489752626926622,0.0,0.05235160271088708,0.0,0.0,0.05541138389565428,0.0,0.0,0.10187705056724852,0.0,0.0,0.05124600145191378,0.0,0.04297181644413741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19303156355598394,0.10285922172197147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10210007660514174,0.0584652648908697,0.04886865664591124,0.0,0.0,0.041672813208453056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884642009713734,0.0,0.04203056338230205,0.047667594783985766,0.13450122216590946,0.04879744973760578,0.0,0.0,0.02522353452948906,0.0,0.0478977641612991,0.05464696835986376,0.04559431099947547,0.04243245773859596,0.0,0.0,0.2697891123393715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02835099702836815,0.08368293847057884,0.15959150300577762,0.05499878033467806,0.0,0.1975773788658595,0.08822690989481688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053025799944969865,0.1686732629582067,0.059114386225197324,0.06687420424573498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947621580156973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776948819897424,0.10413470063271148,0.04950351770374036,0.044340395888819904,0.0,0.1038958419699843,0.0548313733219004,0.08132644536671667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03523550173723708,0.12185732397729394,0.049998231368805435,0.17619873070601733,0.044146969644454234,0.041891134508526516,0.05580895240673305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440545873428446,0.03329886203230499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050272704986781686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039818014670501965,0.0,0.036671476031816266,0.07397871772742043,0.038474661345918884,0.0,0.1061072826080403,0.0468140266272168,0.0,0.047866343830742585,0.0,0.0,0.1062525506361778,0.16901803898948606,0.0,0.0,0.05852971605032217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034584224216567774,0.08711593616916875,0.0521195787372148,0.054759139833984435,0.047157785135145576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05014856050924245,0.0,0.053059215876761684,0.0,0.0,0.09587350798797492,0.0,0.0,0.053558202524648095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934167358037664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253136281887856,0.0,0.04992138191212896,0.0,0.0422676996659379,0.0,0.04933789196200345,0.0,0.14123644497393587,0.0,0.3187080734897226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710679685768131,0.0,0.0566093100320528,0.047016357006152726,0.0,0.15003031552154988,0.0,0.04360199932272108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942484029821773,0.06392904279432549,0.0,0.07920679972802208,0.05817710369164096,0.0,0.04728548388776711,0.0,0.11084893052852204,0.06773776338291655,0.0,0.0,0.10386482834836656,0.060005940210274285,0.043084930143952274,0.0,0.16464257017510656,0.029423675043952862,0.03959667306905025,0.08003004597505485,0.0,0.0,0.046244224147841656,0.09002754798442981,0.05569521768943233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263426558769415,0.05066099980512813,0.0,0.07087425025599367,0.0,0.0,0.06424906652176543
mentalhealth,throwaway2948271729,2020/03/21,"Whats wrong with me Im using a throwaway because i might mention somethings i dont want people knowing..

Latley i dont know what been wrong with me, i feel like i dont have energy or motivation sometimes to do what i wanna do, i start thinking about things and i get anxious and it gets me in a really bad headspace and i get depressed.

 I also feel like my mind is foggy, i smoke weed and i thought that was it but even when im not high i still feel like my mind is foggy, sometimes i cant remember things like i forget stuff right after it iust happened, i freeze in social situations, like not anxiety per say but i just think about stuff and i forget im even there. I feel like my mind isnt clear and the more i think about it the more anxious i get. 

i dont know why i feel like i dont have no energy or motivation because everything in my life currenty is going well (other than coronavirus) i have straight A's in school (sophmore in highschool), my family is well, i have good freinds that i trust and i can go to if i need anything, theres nothing in my life that puts me down but i dont know why feel like this. 

This has only been happening for a few weeks and its not been going really well for me. Mentally i feel like im losing my fucking mind i dont know why this is happening to me. Please help.",0.7915660400846498,2.8804090180505426,2.874522594298518,91.46635379061372,83.36823104693141,6.131158969251835,21.465081538653045,7.372421405659032,0.7051529690028637,1026,33,227,16,29,346,121,277,0.10099999999999999,0.68,0.21899999999999997,0.9875,1,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,14,20,1,0,6,0,27,3,0,3,1,51,58,16,0,4,10,0,8,9,0,1,2,1,0,0,19,10,0,0,19,0,0,4,13,6,3,0,5,9,45,14,20,52,3,19,0,2,0,1,4,10,1,4,14,149,64,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05024088206929992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04806071605793602,0.14194803521818167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05169936703878631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05245599214286282,0.0765946960782493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541108136267361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5154104832903089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829902307502841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05646278060841638,0.0,0.05922552668316908,0.0,0.22236235731421425,0.3141737987123201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058080413762855075,0.13129323058150175,0.0,0.10711415773911917,0.05269436945751583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16666699823382586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04211006556540864,0.06637773453003021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27144578482509685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263403368077326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874987329541219,0.2762367321849798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07028475842040939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331251121478093,0.06664706821769571,0.2537401112561793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046583711747795686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060281984655316936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047781007899659465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0435547298308628,0.0,0.0,0.06896264395883346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315616596483818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049421054340916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07116812707542454,0.05365194217779056,0.0,0.04996071525968094,0.0,0.06358194055062504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061758405622674,0.0,0.06404185997732742,0.0,0.04836551586638063,0.12427045009729698,0.0,0.04446763909311849,0.0,0.050171878761956376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383847924804585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834758651911785,0.12076657422542199,0.0,0.049875786446997965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05426036103774925,0.0,0.0,0.03705563002209943,0.0,0.05039417696588383,0.0,0.16946082434355167,0.0,0.17006853349850934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737787273630298,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Coco46448,2020/03/21,"What causes people to withdraw from society? Hello,

I am trying to write a story about a guy with a mental health disorder withdrawing from society and become very bitter, only to realize, rue, and regret where he went wrong as he laid on his deathbed in solitude. 

However, I am no mental health expert. Does anyone know what kind of mental disorder might fit into this category, even if it's not a 100% match? I intend for my story to spread awareness of this type of mental struggle, and thus, I want it to be as accurate as possible.

Thank you.",6.862168284789648,7.07970183495146,7.831213592233013,69.49238673139162,64.63106796116503,10.750161812297735,31.729773462783168,10.504223727775694,3.508664724919093,431,15,71,10,6,146,74,103,0.17600000000000002,0.767,0.057999999999999996,-0.9178,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,3,6,1,1,4,0,4,2,0,3,0,16,8,7,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,1,7,2,19,5,0,6,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,2,0,48,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880811893832816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17186216068845336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15985725666347955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566916025464536,0.0,0.13617784873457145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278081606400212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15408118130881862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3308183534882529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204683102591458,0.08552074961941017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6272845862349112,0.16508063654623675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835058030057882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10788235277795973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175430100728928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16268033207045318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14326739981926478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056509066085248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839689367234552,0.09178448737893354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14425466571751286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013821676746588,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loveamaj,2020/03/21,"I'm so exhausted from trying I just want to give up, not on life exactly (maybe a little, but not a risk) 

I'm just tired of trying new medications and going through the symptoms. The hassles of the US healthcare system and learning every in and out of my medical plan. Keeping up with prescriptions, and the hoops pharmacies have put me through. Reading books on mental illness, practicing everything I can. I'm tired of focusing on this part of me, and my interest is dying out.

I trust my psychiatrist and glad she goes above and beyond to help. But I just want to give up on this very long chapter in my life. It's like I've accepted I have no interest in being a millionaire and am okay as long as I can support myself financially. Can't I accept that I just will have a lower quality of life, and move on. As long as I'm able to function and keep a job, and I'm not harming myself nor abusing or hurting others, is it fine just to stop my mental health journey here?",5.250549828178698,5.585373865979384,6.468608247422682,77.48047250859109,68.0721649484536,9.765635738831616,32.66151202749141,9.725611199111238,3.0686852233676976,766,32,148,16,12,259,109,194,0.11,0.679,0.21100000000000002,0.9693,2,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,1,8,14,0,1,9,1,11,11,0,0,1,34,24,20,1,2,11,0,0,1,0,1,11,0,0,0,6,14,0,3,3,2,0,4,6,4,0,0,0,0,19,10,33,22,1,25,0,1,0,0,5,15,0,1,6,105,25,4,0.1327494942631283,0.15728644334386474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777301660290076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118471743554255,0.0,0.11930668570689637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546908223243535,0.0754445968030316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110650475549544,0.0,0.0,0.08897918776533166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14211107919902416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13173338947316018,0.2359876999437833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2812946810009999,0.06485469746100499,0.1330498677951197,0.0,0.35243737511970324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336470973207093,0.0,0.0,0.2674622990299688,0.26756053440592603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410917038126842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821028877378668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375476594318878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334499073907878,0.0,0.0,0.13278541816157402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098452133284692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506425529371184,0.0,0.13797755341292706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051520308319443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802563853980076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15968129658442354,0.0,0.0,0.10953223541880064,0.15659818227438327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pesver27,2020/03/21,"Loneliness after breakup plus Coronavirus social isolation Hi all,

I’ll try to be brief: I recently split from my long-term partner who’d I’d been living with for 6 years. I’m living on my own. This in itself has been very emotionally hard.

I don’t have a great support network around me, and only a few friends, who aren’t super close anymore (struggles with social anxiety and a resultant drink issue for a good few years - working through these things now though, on a positive note).

My only respite was trying to get out there and do things in my spare time (meet-ups, existing friends, football, etc.) and the fact I’d got a promotion and moved to an office (previously home-worked for 6 months, which I hated due to isolation).

But then COVID hits, and looks like I’ll be isolated for months, with very little social interaction with others and working from home. On my own constantly. Dealing with loneliness already.

The prospect is very scary to me, for my mental health. It was difficult enough, but then this on-top for the foreseeable. Sometimes I just cry.

But I want to be proactive. I’m the only person who can do something to help me. What can I do to try to help my social isolation in particular? Are there online groups you could suggest? Any ideas?

I also want to say though that I’m grateful for my health. I know COVID is a serious thing which can actually take people’s lives. So I always keep that in perspective. And I always try to remember that my situation is temporary, which helps a bit.

Appreciate any advice :)",3.9451644562334214,6.2621928586206925,4.7103448275862085,81.15798408488068,73.86206896551724,8.185676392572942,27.705570291777192,8.950670267944501,2.4349920424403186,1219,48,222,27,26,392,162,290,0.086,0.755,0.159,0.9719,1,3,2,0,0,0,48.0,0,1,0,4,9,11,1,1,13,0,23,3,0,1,2,31,37,18,0,3,4,0,1,1,3,0,2,1,1,2,19,17,1,1,3,1,0,2,2,4,0,0,5,3,23,7,37,26,8,25,0,0,1,0,21,11,0,0,13,142,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.08935424252907627,0.0,0.0,0.08947626922057338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010442667782252,0.07322450638292705,0.15237884889328646,0.0,0.0,0.1245346950413404,0.0,0.07004698295101848,0.0,0.09080788686761866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151227288639641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09996527711108603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989492480515859,0.0,0.0731072107382294,0.0,0.100579865252245,0.0,0.09439950595112456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969885182173709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299831329741788,0.0,0.0946111334500428,0.1021191916165043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14148580104767725,0.0,0.04783893915063707,0.0,0.0,0.07680038713022441,0.07323290408741615,0.1009507481116594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820242648428536,0.09040149180682676,0.0,0.19465865028605747,0.0,0.0,0.18412229071893213,0.0,0.1836943439961524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103365752324362,0.0,0.09557008236624064,0.0,0.08138718912137706,0.0,0.0,0.05032173552897325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04473403934972802,0.09177219622374544,0.2425607473409989,0.08103215353778193,0.07689154817885031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227599497897247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461726367329535,0.09731911607592872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20891795130738167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347964966274958,0.07995103596124713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040940208438933,0.0,0.10372530816849974,0.0,0.0,0.07281617206445445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292290902336294,0.0,0.3733559914983936,0.0,0.07049121909098477,0.09056013739773837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572363061182614,0.0,0.0,0.10390688962637423,0.0,0.0,0.0688454930235019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824951744004178,0.0,0.17992431722529173,0.0,0.05339229438273247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486665285049733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266521711353785,0.10801483195832004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19998125608420195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11792973028455353
mentalhealth,httpsbenny,2020/03/21,"My girlfriend has bpd and I'm not sure how to help her. We have a somewhat volatile relationship. We've been good friends for years and around 3 months ago we took it a step forward. In the interest of privacy, I'm going to keep details to a need-to-know. She isn't on medication. She is in therapy often and has other non therapy activities that help her regulate. She's been having a few very intense panic attacks recently. I love her so much. We try to put boundaries to help us regulate our relationship and keep us accountable for not being dependent on each other. I know she loves me, too. I feel like I'm not doing everything I can to help her but I don't know what more/else I can do. Please help me if you can. I appreciate all of you. Thank you.",1.0455050505050494,3.4585486298701333,3.3778354978354983,86.08357864357866,85.42857142857143,7.3183261183261195,24.139971139971138,8.344100000000001,1.828540836940837,595,24,124,15,18,204,94,154,0.038,0.738,0.225,0.9746,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,6,3,0,0,5,10,1,1,5,0,15,3,0,2,2,25,28,8,0,1,5,0,1,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,5,9,0,2,3,0,1,5,5,2,0,0,3,1,27,8,15,24,5,14,0,0,0,2,28,6,0,4,6,85,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800696049867955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850915308003372,0.0,0.15144849575244065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676658230067359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120855399255104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964384191744122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731181760094537,0.09510426894798882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285176612839048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565780039856759,0.1116586314272752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4461531980316461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366545923159653,0.0,0.0,0.21948546082259932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503797439894378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24030036908450375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410906871821368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625881704243796,0.0,0.09786192743626794,0.09871023325851107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619308096604878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613087742245484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13382703181434252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314445210775288,0.2858520843031614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12546839711774482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256328204997398,0.3044792540378902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479063726035798,0.09038289158476703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.320265099856252,0.0,0.0,0.10984176940013204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572790307575667
mentalhealth,anonimus-account,2020/03/21,"Im fucking useless Dont tell me things like ""oh ur special"" no im not. I hide in my own shadow, i stay in bed all day. I hide. I hide. I hide. To be special u hav to feel special. And i dont. I have a great group of friends and I stil feel so alone. Im always trying to but myself in a box, because im part of the society. Im ordinary. Im fat, im ugly, im useless, im pity. I try to keep myself busy because if I start to think i end up questioning if I even exist or not, or if are the things I see real. I hace even told my mom about how I feel. She told me it is normal. Another thing im fucking normal at, great. Im always afraid. I cant be free. I wish I was just air, or a tree. But no, I had to be human. And ruin my moms life. Plus my friends would be the same without me. And why am I posting this? I have no idea. Maybe just want the world to see how useless I am. How I have no plans for my life. How i just go day ti day without anything interesting. WHY AM I POSTING THIS?",-3.0824578914535268,-1.5022189213973751,0.7713212726138501,101.18613973799127,102.84279475982531,3.490505302557705,16.14984404242046,5.288315135182226,-0.9112962944479106,733,22,196,5,35,268,110,229,0.228,0.6859999999999999,0.087,-0.9895,0,1,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,1,11,18,2,1,7,0,18,5,1,4,1,39,33,18,0,8,15,2,3,1,2,1,3,0,1,1,6,5,1,1,6,0,1,1,11,8,0,0,4,5,36,11,19,24,4,16,0,5,2,2,12,7,2,7,6,118,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993187792969728,0.0,0.0,0.11236654160497583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708021470003512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05556441535218976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232092094036006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306372837621727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826931635590266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059803979634393725,0.0,0.0,0.08919458623397318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242264976084556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433383809764173,0.12484501915565732,0.0,0.0,0.03837400656666474,0.0,0.0,0.1488853147287686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622351916583339,0.8022824996357335,0.0,0.0,0.06001618360382675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538482006057968,0.03298757885531778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783439058440538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581606556193256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231340587878426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311917043834755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293338042806861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563949770495765,0.0,0.0,0.07685421345418529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761173667967852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04779204291703667,0.07196890137610701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05901673957552937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134574790109701,0.0432650306007817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12903931339186986,0.0,0.09168528973659304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0398259115269304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12185524601051692,0.0,0.0776463564590981,0.13017657219956116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047965313918405895,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SkinnedShrimp,2020/03/21,"Is this weird? I've seen so much about people wishing someone cares about them, they feel alone, etc. . . 
I'm the opposite. I know I should be grateful for the people in my life that say they appreciate me, but I can't help wishing that no one cared about me because then I wouldn't have anyone to disappoint or leave behind. (I don't think I'm actively suicidal) I've been self harm free for over a year now, and the only thing that stops me from relapsing is getting caught. I don't want anyone to care about this. I just want to do my own thing, cope my own way. I want to be left alone. Is this a teenage angst thing or something more?",2.9892366412213747,4.248151320610692,3.6609847328244283,92.14766030534348,73.9618320610687,7.07206106870229,23.787022900763358,7.554174236665415,0.7919612213740459,497,14,112,6,10,157,81,131,0.203,0.644,0.153,-0.5005,0,2,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,3,0,7,7,0,0,5,0,13,1,0,0,0,16,29,6,1,7,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,9,1,0,1,3,0,1,1,5,3,0,1,3,3,17,5,14,22,5,9,0,1,1,0,6,3,0,2,4,73,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137998351262672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21185331326854692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234805421819482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4633682557095592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895351005372675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659885486572947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07914826350270966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10154182514134676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325598464922902,0.0,0.0,0.16040804505302142,0.16459638917860753,0.0,0.10700320688745496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136397506024197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265482994153632,0.11521641403498604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21005081332369346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047243680861053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15803908756169982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835859258480387,0.11662586341374168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266540091183761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16570754701580231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019334543756259,0.0970698905219359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26806153733210986,0.12024721634614455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484164100314163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755581470958498
mentalhealth,vmsa1997,2020/03/21,Dad tried to commit suicide while on the phone with me I never post on reddit but I just need somewhere to vent and advice so bad I’m so desperate. Today my dad called me and told me he was going to slit his throat with a knife he had in his hand the phone call lasted probably like 45 minutes of him just going into detail about how he was going to kill him self after the phone call and him drinking so drunk. It was so traumatizing to sit there and try to talk my dad down and nothing was working I was begging for him to not do it and how I love him and I had to have my boyfriend call the cops on him while I stayed on the phone... he kept drinking and slamming the drink down and everytime I was terrified it was his body slamming on the floor screaming “dad are you there!? Dad!!! Dad!!! Please!” And him just saying he can’t live and trying to give me information of his life insurance. He’s now in the hospital and I’m waiting till the morning to go talk to him because honestly I was so traumatized by everything I couldn’t go right away and see him like that drunk saying he wants to die.. I want to talk to him sober he’s an alcoholic and depressed and I just feel so bad for not going right away but I’ve had suicidal and depression problems in the past and he was so drunk I don’t think he’d remember me coming so I just wanted to mentally recharge so I can sit him down and talk to him about getting help because I feel like I have to be so mentally strong and be there for him it’s just going to be so hard to see him and have this talk I feel so awful and guilty and scared to say the wrong thing I don’t know how I’m going to find the strength I’m only 22 and he has no one else being that he’s driven many friends away with his alcoholism and all our family lives out the country I’m so desperate for any advice my heart is breaking and I don’t know how I’m going to do it,1.706224742998934,3.325209987593052,3.2772463665366907,92.07455086848637,78.15632754342431,6.590825948245302,22.184260900389933,7.447530270364453,0.6599156185749728,1487,43,337,20,35,491,170,403,0.214,0.688,0.09699999999999999,-0.9965,0,0,5,0,0,2,17.0,1,1,0,4,29,17,1,1,15,1,31,14,4,4,3,65,66,47,4,6,10,6,5,3,1,0,3,4,0,1,9,31,8,2,9,6,0,11,9,9,0,1,15,11,50,8,52,45,1,44,0,2,2,1,62,19,0,0,12,218,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543599416753092,0.0,0.16881476420761365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053710241918294335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22261762803251453,0.0,0.13189278566265794,0.09629298217476842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773082683187923,0.0,0.0,0.3225964505159685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803571255702898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605358801080605,0.0,0.08197050069021528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321158949097411,0.0,0.0,0.0659790480250895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098362948146801,0.0,0.07445688640591341,0.0,0.1198065118204752,0.056424518645667186,0.0,0.0,0.07218781271275082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102103995799544,0.0,0.04126466112985351,0.07576641181960718,0.4039839131146046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075206000090906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359365560986008,0.0529397464900928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738151236539518,0.0,0.08681251720614452,0.06438060010155483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05578708712753087,0.11575935885138518,0.0,0.1394845178445259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712840380666005,0.0,0.0,0.08007501361781956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591898871853079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856390526548282,0.06091553061209014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578503957955485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05352002158247243,0.06006911676069596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539693805939751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669815255443772,0.0,0.0,0.07564260438253441,0.0,0.08515559547999503,0.07557478855774649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947083209109516,0.13489982404237974,0.0,0.18842817493619973,0.07907442707357043,0.0,0.12587632552603992,0.0,0.08239510388350499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418394811651664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17278624878566676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174123605837801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052471910004484784,0.05060826303741373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486538517845348,0.07547036744942258,0.0,0.16087010208541805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975630052298488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05749959420192782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863540540528429,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reversecoolkid,2020/03/21,"What the hell Started taking my antidepressants again and of course i feel numb.  this time, i am so fucking restless.  my body will not let me sleep.  i cant write because i cant focus to write anything good and i feel like a failure of a human.  like, dude get your shit together.  and im fucking quarantined, which is fine in retrospect because its helping flatten the curve but i crave affection and i will not get a single hug in the time that i am not around my friends.  i need a goddamn hug every hour.  This feels very attention seeking, i dont even remember what it was for but it wasnt supposed to be this.",2.1137804878048776,4.3061957642276445,3.373353658536587,89.13368902439026,79.16260162601625,6.376422764227643,27.32317073170732,7.492282038375204,1.549043902439024,481,21,98,7,12,156,78,123,0.196,0.701,0.10300000000000001,-0.9166,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,4,13,4,1,7,0,12,8,3,1,0,19,22,7,0,1,5,0,3,2,1,2,1,0,0,1,10,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,2,3,15,7,8,16,1,8,1,0,0,4,6,3,4,0,7,65,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862454509558027,0.17159671504161564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350086571278794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21411221603936212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225912557078261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12731575214707014,0.0,0.16240809080159685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923948020116763,0.13770733916972624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14892541837626047,0.3564058803731245,0.2014176397894325,0.0,0.0,0.16167742204708266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292025488290159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898291603043542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20821320744454408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19710952530008055,0.0,0.18834499226034415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14292863739151884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183588006826918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19786473294350945,0.0,0.0,0.1928985879342304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13643608087751846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14493106411985446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22479908853433128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15904667541326714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Freedom_07,2020/03/21,"I need advice I'm rather closed off about this and it's taking alot out of me to post this, but here it goes. During my early grades, I was a very sociable, but due to cruel bullying I faced when I transferred schools, I became extremely socially aware and have since been more Cautious  and withdrawn. I now hate my body, I hate the fact that I'm skinny and tall and wish I had a better figure, and deeply resent my voice due to it sounding very high pitch and feminine (I was frequently called ""gay"" and homosexual for the way I sounded by said bullies). What's worse is that I feel I can't express myself now and I can't form a romantic bond with girls because of these shamings and imposed values that have been put on me by others, and I am now frightened to even talk to members of the opposite sex I am interested in. This, amongst many other factors, has contributed to my depression in the past (I once felt depressed for two years straight and even suicidal at one point). I hate my body so much and want to 'leave it' (best way I can describe the feeling) still to this day. How can I escape these things of which feel like I have no control over and get out of this hellhole to live the life I always wanted?",7.298705234159782,6.008493099173553,7.1956611570247935,79.39227961432508,64.2892561983471,10.21542699724518,34.21625344352617,9.075114841892004,2.7371559228650137,958,34,194,13,12,306,148,242,0.223,0.6759999999999999,0.10099999999999999,-0.99,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,3,12,12,5,1,10,0,16,7,4,2,1,34,32,19,1,5,3,0,4,1,0,0,1,4,0,1,19,18,1,1,5,0,0,1,3,8,0,2,7,8,29,4,28,25,5,29,0,2,0,2,6,13,0,1,13,136,48,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859007890301755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949500003199356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021719910795329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809757747912346,0.11638233932293818,0.0,0.292337864917523,0.0,0.0,0.1343700398414869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759150213460207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486588733269472,0.0,0.2266798163755285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17383041398348187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19961045127233912,0.09400927761391753,0.12634885762468195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06875133500316563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3897592646291558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13903406423052164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933681870690193,0.0,0.0,0.09294724858847468,0.06428915398173053,0.0,0.11619805605462966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13341352954038674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673518555955124,0.09757372433837694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401410757648361,0.08917007513073158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561935575873145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124396877062377,0.0,0.12602866210509478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228620255691634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517402842642747,0.0,0.0,0.1331780252671541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088541771517486,0.0,0.0,0.13414136738127938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508945904443197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14394017724780803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894072983961323,0.1057685823129334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742380924011475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285461624604698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21715419312645465,0.15523262072959673,0.20890304571063364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513241874589588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410338540136515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474086735176205
mentalhealth,cat_on_a_boat,2020/03/21,"Vivid nightmares during antidepressant withdrawal. It’s about 2:30, middle of the night, and I was rudely awakened by a serious nightmare. In the past few weeks I was (pretty much) forced to go cold turkey from my Zoloft. 150mg of the stuff. Recently I’ve been having extremely powerful dreams/nightmares, and they almost seem like they’re showing me something that I’ve been missing while taking the Zoloft. 

When I was on Zoloft, I felt emotionally detached from almost everything. Any stress, trauma, or even slight inconvenience wouldn’t phase me at all. As heavenly as that sounds, the same rules applied to the good things that we’re happening in my life. I wouldn’t care. 

Now it seems like everything is hitting me, all at once. It’s overwhelming, it’s extremely scary, and I’m afraid. I don’t want to feel alone in this. Not a lot of people understand the dragon that is discontinuation syndrome. 

Has anybody experienced anything like this? Stories and examples are very much welcomed. 

p.s. this is my first ever post on any subreddit, so, cut me some slack if this is all over the place.",4.587646125363662,7.316536994974875,4.623380058185671,80.57003967204444,73.52261306532664,8.008569161597462,27.559111346204705,8.841846274778883,2.4419788944723617,878,34,152,19,19,272,130,199,0.13,0.75,0.11900000000000001,-0.3257,1,1,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,1,2,6,15,2,3,10,0,15,4,0,0,4,24,28,11,0,4,3,0,2,3,0,2,4,1,0,0,14,4,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,8,0,1,6,6,14,7,20,19,9,21,1,2,1,0,2,10,0,8,12,96,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114066198878834,0.16104336905344546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114805076463397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795710501006935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15853499940359364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17490816977247908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10270135089813746,0.14065189730553268,0.0,0.0,0.2794933230827133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862169620483903,0.0,0.14929721520106748,0.0,0.0,0.13226186828211106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836998925993922,0.13041975854474666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750153252178868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982897380901864,0.2278973907057313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321941902371454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286098044336927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459192079249347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655944718481146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14843521613658908,0.10779894335015336,0.0,0.16245660103705126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891886354603134,0.1581918056139003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15353011658688126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28310912247552844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197057478080476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17811617004660113,0.0,0.178001747872685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169110327763646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033023290213649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187320954614928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829762339173376,0.09171352404362758,0.0,0.12472673000197325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,phatmumma,2020/03/21,"Don't know whats going on I have found myself going into a bit of a depressive state which flicks in and out during winter for the past 3 years (I'm now 18), but this year feels a bit different.

I have lost my apetite, but if I get myself food I eat it faster then I ever have. I know I'm not eating as much as i should at the moment but I just have a slight disgust for food and I don't know why.

I have waves of anxiety, and flick between being very sad/irritable to VERY high energy/ elated moods. I've looked up manic symptoms and I don't feel like i'm suddenly going to quit my job or spend heaps of money which leads me to believe this isn't something to worry about. An example of an elated mood for me is spontaneously sticking pictures all over my wall without a lot of consciousness (it feels like my body is doing it for me and it HAS to be perfect). I'm very shaky and can't stop my face from twitching sometimes.

Sometimes I feel like I'm drunk or really high on something, and often forget things that I have done in the past minute.

I often feel like I'm not quite in my body and it's just going  through the motions without me having much control at all.

I have depression and bipolar disorder in my family, so I'm wondering if this might have anything to do with it?

Is this something I should be concerned about? Or should I just ride it out; it's been going on for a couple weeks. Any advice would be helpful.",3.5188014800514797,4.447505104729732,4.7767374517374535,85.9209009009009,72.27702702702703,7.5299871299871315,25.919562419562418,7.793537801064563,1.3344265122265129,1125,35,235,14,21,373,149,296,0.133,0.789,0.078,-0.91,2,0,3,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,6,10,12,1,1,12,0,31,11,3,2,4,56,56,21,0,6,15,0,5,4,0,5,3,0,0,0,17,13,5,2,11,1,2,8,9,5,0,0,4,6,30,5,40,43,7,39,0,3,1,0,1,17,0,11,17,163,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214305106182748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412318519827646,0.0,0.0721346875881879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759596601420395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623710041733013,0.0,0.0,0.20588935398166144,0.2094788574997043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575879129631148,0.0,0.1043345691096968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243064840740098,0.0,0.0,0.09851720927776626,0.1080691467066369,0.0,0.0,0.09649554791012337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19297270050187956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852943636251739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889203522032914,0.0,0.2383895160104501,0.26945474305207673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22804147098232716,0.10338855512982342,0.0,0.0,0.049264747528021284,0.0,0.26794739857353755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320331183199836,0.1992536747627072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357229148367467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546462609886566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18426923285514127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918325061811703,0.0,0.10293309072563298,0.08016542646935887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003108232421516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386339477901964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18002867423015545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20058665097815584,0.0,0.0,0.06040718081693931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21777649168962926,0.18651844644607196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883404520195053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800761900830922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06264477467897661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23340739125720344,0.0,0.0,0.07563699648827077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850857105950985,0.0,0.0,0.18179219214703088,0.10225787127023822,0.0,0.09576018150850836,0.0,0.06698378530723745,0.0,0.0,0.12144454897342358
mentalhealth,EMB1981,2020/03/21,"I have a near obsessive need for certainty. For the past couple months or so I have had the horrible urge to find certainty in something. So for instance, when I find out about something, I try to be certain about it. So for instance, just as an example, if I were to find out that a person I respect is an arrogant asshole, then I want to be certain about it. I will try and find a source. I can look for hearsay, but when I find the majority of people agree on one notion, I tell myself I can’t know if they’re right. Then I look for another source that claims another things about that person, how can I know if they’re not lying? That’s the question that pops into my head.

Nothing short of seeing it with my own eyes will satisfy me. And even when I do find a reliable source, and my logic and reasoning says that one conclusion is right I’ll always question myself. So I can’t know if I’m right or wrong about that person.

It’s not about being right either, because I’ll always question myself. It’s always about being certain. And I always question my own logic. I have this need for certainty which can never be fulfilled as I’ll endlessly question myself.

Is there a way to help with this a little?",4.196779290228489,5.227107326446284,5.272508507535246,82.61592853670395,70.77685950413223,8.173456490034031,27.87165775401069,8.4952907291091,1.9598519202722409,951,33,186,15,17,314,108,242,0.055999999999999994,0.818,0.126,0.9235,0,0,2,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,1,18,6,0,1,12,0,21,2,2,2,4,47,31,24,0,7,11,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,16,10,0,0,18,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,2,5,27,4,31,22,4,21,0,0,4,0,11,12,0,11,8,140,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000695312767796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18907378264317987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05495853082247218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975638932485743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059547480284979776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4944081332257409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925265206044909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060429963295331415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864286975734942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036044078658613,0.0,0.0,0.151417411200762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196201262267315,0.0,0.0,0.13369972016343856,0.06953420677398094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865075385463885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221846780244559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606452621306802,0.06250312578898436,0.23616338547207685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5049792468947137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269583889034584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30797243870267665,0.0,0.0716960220511052,0.0,0.0,0.0718430124397489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388136688614433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788007049472486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05989593463958786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242061348187347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05317660592673835,0.0715619879793202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857191737389473,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NewSweatshop,2020/03/21,"I'm disappointing and need help. I cant help but feel like I'm a disappointment. I love my parents, but deep down I know I'm disappointing them, I'm a loser with no friends, I'm shit at everything I do, and I am struggling with some serious mental health issues, but I'm too afraid to get help, and figure out what the hell is wrong with me.",3.3016666666666663,4.030635833333335,4.939888888888888,85.294,72.6111111111111,8.537777777777778,25.511111111111113,8.841846274778883,1.547124444444445,268,8,61,5,5,91,47,72,0.384,0.415,0.20199999999999999,-0.9657,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,1,13,2,2,3,0,4,3,1,0,0,15,15,6,0,1,3,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,10,0,0,0,1,8,3,7,15,1,4,1,4,0,1,7,4,2,1,1,32,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232791918164748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561723188400994,0.17748347068005746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919418404658937,0.0,0.12979809929358166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640769555803142,0.0,0.0,0.4995663323060834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593037232997229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653449973562054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213737884746063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22422412780514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503661028305895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184212916876946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27585993185626384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255017050941008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597203351807705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716269024258436,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shithead-,2020/03/21,I can’t sleep I’ve been having extreme anxiety lately. The last couple of night I’ve been waking up feeling fearful of absolutely nothing but my stomach will be in knots. Its 2am and I’m currently worrying about things that shouldn’t matter but instead it makes me want to cry and rip my hair out. I can’t eat. I don’t know what’s wrong with me,1.0046917808219185,3.2679697945205533,3.0016267123287683,89.79504280821921,83.93150684931506,5.8417808219178085,22.823630136986303,7.1686216300943375,0.8896041095890412,277,10,58,4,8,93,57,73,0.207,0.7390000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.9186,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,9,5,4,1,0,12,14,4,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,2,7,0,8,9,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,35,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20381175639836796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947903774770947,0.29265156230505673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27261575769730384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29979831316782085,0.13471074067007613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14641831626561255,0.21716912192870227,0.3005351127233733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778384533142329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500185766323997,0.0,0.2556386624986803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666139562952385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17699863939790533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571423328389027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705640162704681,0.0,0.0,0.2912901411924969,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,liltbfrompari,2020/03/21,"I was born toxic Yesterday I washed up, hoovered my room, worked out for 2 hours, and cut my own hair. Tonight I’m laying in bed unable to sleep because I can’t stop thinking about how toxic I’ve been since birth. 

When I was 7 my best friend called me a control freak cause I wouldn’t let him join choir. I can’t stop thinking about that. That’s not the only thing I did. I literally tried to control every inch of my mother’s life as a child. I refused to go to the toilet unless she took me. I refused to dress like a girl, only boys clothes. I refused to wear laces, only Velcro. I wouldn’t let her sleep until I fell asleep. I’d scream every shop down. t’s seems small but god did I wear my mother down. I was toxic. Like what the hell was wrong me? 

I don’t think I had any empathy for people. That’s probably normal right? not to have empathy at that age? Like I just saw people as existing for my benefit, to do what I wanted. Do you develop empathy? Am I a sociopath? Surely if I was I wouldn’t be feeling guilty about all of this. Maybe I was just spoilt. 

Much to think about. Had to vent it out cause if it lingers in my mind any longer I’ll have a break down. Maybe I’m overthinking it, but the guilt is making me hate myself and now I can’t sleep. 

Maybe seeing a therapist is due.",0.2604785537043597,2.4204598168498173,2.108252392768524,95.632715349167,86.36263736263737,5.134302256882902,17.963960770412392,6.532088108194933,-0.16615103391232422,1002,25,228,11,31,330,147,273,0.13699999999999998,0.762,0.10099999999999999,-0.8577,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,0,4,9,14,3,1,10,0,28,9,7,6,2,38,43,12,0,7,9,2,2,3,1,3,2,2,2,3,11,4,0,7,6,2,1,3,9,7,0,0,13,6,40,7,32,24,4,29,1,0,2,0,14,13,1,3,15,138,51,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762692495035302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064931255382212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216260231315024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11834308662229925,0.0,0.0,0.2381148631650692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599751245506097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19529527309401168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058600654713172634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954119868314395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586654164947592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442360829409284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413451608188373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370236506254881,0.08186098853573519,0.16986324319415513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736168434345929,0.0,0.3493002513250121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702223094707236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519712026284297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11355377296815344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644330900764514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606958120376545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495582014178035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989748122550408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235435090249076,0.1055076444109879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587062213470532,0.0,0.3479400154031089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19378900296603788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923089702466933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13456454421460026,0.0769963560475177,0.29704669332159545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12876506057531428,0.0786859842819437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835864417127759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437389123782649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671441713158513,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jotastrophe,2020/03/21,"I can't sleep because I'm worried my friends hate me I don't really know how to describe this, but I just have this gross feeling that my friends just dont like me. That they think I'm petty or annoying and I dont know how to bring this up without possibly seeming more annoying, and I just don't want to stay up at night because I can't stop thinking about everything I'm doing wrong.",6.5686585365853665,4.912913548780491,7.083048780487808,80.7933536585366,65.95121951219512,10.639024390243904,37.57317073170732,9.516144504307137,3.275039024390244,309,14,67,5,4,102,48,82,0.29100000000000004,0.596,0.113,-0.9437,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,6,8,3,0,0,0,8,1,1,2,0,18,20,6,0,1,6,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,6,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,0,1,11,3,8,20,1,7,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,3,42,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476977197678009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4762209693811321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18259360927767787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272745780997566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139330014314552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20058558135621585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22331079662936704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925724797275327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19065868582534085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22904052946733985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015413225050715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849558190588495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033139585651001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165492387769864,0.0,0.16985690453178487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603627195391014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983329826984912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958459631688297,0.0,0.0,0.2063261877120401,0.0,0.0,0.222131476235444,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ithinkimcray,2020/03/21,"Should i check myself in to a clinic? My depression has gotten to the point where i literally couldnt force myself to go in on my last workday. I literally feel like i'm going crazy. My job is easy. Pays great. Great benefits. Its the white picket fence. But i just cant. Everyday is harder than the last. I only have so many hours to burn to take off and... Idk. I cant even think of the words to decribe it.

So seriously. Is willing to risk my financial security (aka job) a sign that i may need to check myself in? I fantasize about suicide but it really is more of a fantasy than a plan. It just sounds so nice for it all to end. I feel my eyelids getting heavy just thinking about it. The peace. The rest. So... Soothing? Idk. I'm just tired.",-0.5388596491228057,1.6543279210526336,2.0181578947368406,91.87377192982456,98.73684210526315,5.428070175438597,18.17543859649123,6.996647511020387,0.452551754385965,572,18,124,11,24,195,90,152,0.10400000000000001,0.736,0.16,0.8994,2,0,0,0,0,1,29.0,0,0,0,1,12,9,0,1,10,0,12,2,0,0,1,19,24,7,1,3,6,0,2,1,0,3,2,1,0,0,7,1,0,2,4,1,3,2,3,3,0,0,1,4,17,6,21,19,3,14,0,1,1,0,0,7,0,1,6,83,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16919760059096425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739917665943431,0.0,0.0,0.12974992403829344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19865676587754896,0.14034018961100464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263428924514516,0.0,0.2232881903396631,0.0,0.0,0.43316212546355626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19345853686110276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3898822631336536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202574285927479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597299637574737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19916417302199727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456613147367965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940510682777425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857038130390472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125847555900355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21487870431852368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14770202620817569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25174776501525825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257843756552489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,honeybakedhamm,2020/03/21,"Tips for combatting dissociation and depression during social isolation? Ever since the coronavirus got serious, I’ve had terrible, long periods of dissociation. It genuinely feels like I’m not even here, or that this is all a fake reality I’m in, and I have trouble remembering anything while it’s happening. I’ve always gotten dissociative “episodes” but lately its been so intense. 

My depression has also gotten a lot worse. I had to move out of my college campus and head home. My whole family is practicing social isolation because we believe we should, but being at home all day, everyday is very reminiscent of the times where I was so depressed I couldn’t get out of bed. The feeling is coming back as well, as I depended on daily social interaction from my college life as a distraction from depression. Trying to force myself to be productive or do anything at all, even things I enjoy, is becoming harder and harder again. 

Any tips or advice welcome.",7.610565539112053,8.800500912790703,8.619809725158564,61.112928118393256,63.12790697674418,12.30105708245243,37.14799154334038,11.911945987284742,5.268120930232559,775,37,115,26,11,264,115,172,0.198,0.7170000000000001,0.085,-0.9712,0,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,2,0,0,0,11,13,0,1,6,0,16,2,1,1,4,26,26,16,0,2,6,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,3,0,6,9,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,9,1,0,7,2,13,4,19,15,5,19,0,4,0,0,7,7,0,5,11,87,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215314213091325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814988916931632,0.11252896355064627,0.0,0.0,0.09196657056329337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22257892716358735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103989779476578,0.0,0.08243991298156322,0.14935989701700178,0.0,0.15236706913044432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164956800831079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721741028872246,0.0,0.4659216363694378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17864702784077294,0.122330637299605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274904795251015,0.0,0.1367609308734944,0.09661415197906828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065634474970499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816229226842393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959063777521554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387933445994167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713097557847957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525545089121062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09552269551567848,0.06607052251699355,0.0,0.0,0.1196814954058257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497462777829945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373673702389794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15319844593847584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187038430490508,0.0,0.0,0.4135747486991533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984620887314514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885844514664253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181781764868922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158562617497043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12159532646485292,0.0,0.0,0.1509885501475548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378192151553876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,donotmindthis,2020/03/21,"Hello! Hello! I’m sorry if this is the wrong subreddit to ask but here goes..I was wondering if I Misophonia, a mental illness that makes you have a strong reaction to ‘trigger sounds’. To clarify when I hear certain things, people chewing, loud breathing, my sister laughing really loud, when my mum has news/music on loud, etc.. I just get super annoyed and frustrated and I can’t really focus on anything and I almost feel like crying. I try to subtly cover my ears or block it out. I usually roll my neck or bend to the side when these noises happen.",2.672521440823324,5.202924811320759,4.532332761578047,79.73144939965697,79.18867924528301,7.250771869639795,23.78730703259005,8.296473431620573,1.931671698113208,434,15,74,9,11,147,78,106,0.18600000000000005,0.6559999999999999,0.159,-0.3304,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,2,5,8,2,0,4,0,5,5,3,2,1,17,13,11,0,2,6,2,1,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,5,4,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,7,12,5,8,12,1,9,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,6,5,48,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23829995168178897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19583509144551464,0.0,0.22247670832503666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614069569400527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654076644336396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032850434264272,0.17001107453308778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433334917725253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21044259475223254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682177819637162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626371807838508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588517366578773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398252074167535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16498353824936768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049087829407419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663961725918803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810158450241316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615710071451926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620984423918788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580762970018965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26019088637700805,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tootired_kitt,2020/03/21,"A Millennial’s Mental Heath Instagram Live Hey everyone,

I started a mental health Instagram page and I’m just about to start my first-ever instagram live. I’m not trying to get people to follow me, I would like people to know about this in case they want to come chat, listen or watch! My insta is @thetourettesgirl",4.587499999999999,6.7229560833333375,5.6099999999999985,76.215,71.5,9.466666666666667,23.666666666666664,9.888512548439397,2.5040666666666667,255,7,44,7,5,84,44,60,0.0,0.924,0.076,0.4753,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,8,12,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,8,11,1,5,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,3,23,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105181534864864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335226868548118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078758449188452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276823588497108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597724372687491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430895433359624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939536633669252,0.0,0.4315972014251912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.492570149476752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33885498097568817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.345957397909405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592304036314015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14414605319492926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17360583666537655,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DonRosales,2020/03/21,"Quarantine is bringing my depression back. I just recently had to return home early from my vacation back in my hometown because of the virus. I’ve been at home for the past few days doing small workouts and being on my phone. Because I shipping out to the military this April, I have canceled my internet so I can’t distract myself with video games while I wait to go. The days are starting to feel extremely long. I sleep more than I eat. I feel anxious and frustrated. I want to go out to eat at a restaurant or at least go to the mall but obviously I can’t do that. I can feel my depression gnawing it’s way back into my mind. I hate being alone for too long.",2.106905855338692,4.277758932835823,3.752388059701495,86.51896096440873,79.07462686567162,7.108151549942595,26.7256027554535,8.139509932561175,1.859565556831229,523,22,105,10,13,174,86,134,0.156,0.835,0.009000000000000001,-0.9598,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,2,1,6,0,12,3,1,0,1,16,23,6,0,1,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,6,2,1,3,4,0,4,2,5,0,0,2,3,20,0,21,19,3,28,0,2,0,0,2,9,0,1,14,76,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095763624079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864765503674536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807745604741056,0.0,0.20124427476803824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21290663521958955,0.0,0.2843406137233382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3378055596683455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503855840713338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814308574261659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16296758761767335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3311474567702136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921547934128228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666686705602445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575732911870495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629818475466412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16518428260061574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683390937147035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735965767462304,0.13102097305309246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throw_away1_11,2020/03/21,"I don’t know what’s going on For several years I’ve been hearing voices especially at night, way before I go to bed and while I’m in bed. It’s been happening more lately. It always happens when I’m alone. I don’t know what they say because it’s just an indistinct shout or some mumbling. I freak out thinking someone’s after me and I run outside to see if it’s real. I see what look like flashlights in the corner of my eye and I hear footsteps on the roof and in the walls. What is happening",1.3591428571428563,3.2768049619047623,3.451666666666668,89.01750000000001,80.33333333333333,6.104761904761905,23.833333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.9465047619047621,391,14,83,5,10,133,69,105,0.053,0.92,0.027000000000000003,-0.34,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,5,1,1,0,0,13,20,8,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,8,5,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,2,9,10,1,12,18,2,19,0,0,4,0,4,9,0,3,7,50,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194023741459524,0.0,0.0,0.15587867409325165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419837100112805,0.0,0.15940925557368252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21293488890264284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4969821847326488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42228288565317895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20591008448478235,0.0,0.21132332357672087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152297436705692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15731517420098634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17580227511888566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21322953827009386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14897721614765808,0.0,0.0,0.29856529516536473,0.0,0.0,0.2116365129534125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872930189247045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003743299963175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869870665281845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063833088675405
mentalhealth,MindlessSquirrel9,2020/03/21,"Feel like an idiot who sucks, with accomplishments that are all flukes I've got a STEM degree I did well in, some related accomplishments, and am doing well on the whole in living stability.

I feel like a fucking idiot who sucks at everything. I sucked as a classmate, I sucked in my career job, I sucked in my entry-level job, I sucked in my non-career jobs, I sucked as a friend, I sucked as a coworker, I sucked as someone in charge of my own life.

I feel like I can't quite get my shit together. I was working two jobs for over a year, got rehired with a good incentive after quitting my first career job, got promotions at my second job, in the middle of several legal, family, and I-picked-the-wrong-year-to-quit-drinking fiascos. I had to be doing something right?

I'm not sure if I can't get an accurate gauge on where I rank at anything, or if I can't mentally integrate clashing perspectives of myself, or if I'm just a very unevenly developed person, or all of the above.

My opinion that I suck at skills and as a person never really changes, but how productively I wield that feeling flim-flams.",8.209452054794518,6.179642205479452,8.792095890410959,71.03389726027397,63.018264840182646,12.41296803652968,36.0552511415525,11.20814326018867,3.881246210045664,869,31,168,20,10,294,119,219,0.141,0.772,0.087,-0.8595,6,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,9,5,22,14,0,14,0,11,3,1,1,4,25,33,16,0,3,9,0,4,3,1,0,1,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,14,2,3,6,4,27,8,28,26,5,21,0,0,0,1,5,17,12,8,7,110,32,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591111139540814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104398232470028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022708341501961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382668516821413,0.0,0.0984176617967527,0.0,0.2111481750143794,0.2237470351435272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880135337897077,0.0,0.0,0.08065806083176696,0.09651477730720737,0.10908786706700076,0.0,0.0,0.08756455066421083,0.2504911725005951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6215967120537725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07373978336417858,0.15301157460621045,0.0,0.09218583240418307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10520918369494536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051859779989783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823135742067009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33312212609341896,0.0,0.0,0.06688038446865485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915579135733202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794064574175113,0.1071636114252671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884565527095804,0.08037110431498527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983943979586549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198221374039602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613973732920878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877336685948761,0.0,0.0,0.1165572528941529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600338785005137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414342577016777,0.0,0.13445848684081144
mentalhealth,overlynervous,2020/03/21,"hear me out hey everyone, we are all going through hard times more than usual. reach out if you need help, call friends, family, etc 
If you need food, go online for food banks with your zip
Don’t panic. Try your best to stay calm. Yoga. Workouts at home. Paints. Singing. Learn something new. Listen to the sounds with the windows open. 
Use coping skills, 5 finger grounding exercise is my personal favorite.

3 years ago I decided I wanted to live, after several suicide attempts. With recent events I’ve gone downhill really fast, then I got the news my friend killed himself. 

This wasn’t just a friend or an average human being. He was energy beyond understanding, with such talent and individuality it hurts. He took his life. The amount of people who are hurting because he’s gone, because we all loved him so fucking much. So fucking much. Maybe we could have talked to him more. Done something. Said something. Anything....


On that note, I’m asking dont leave us. You are loved. You have energy this earth needs, it’s love and you’re loved back. No matter what. Don’t give up. We will hurt together, we are all in it together, we can strive and get through this shit....please when you’re in that dark place and you think no one will care, I will. I will care. I will hurt. Because you are so worthy of so much. 

Much love.",1.4146428571428586,4.121829750000003,2.21777777777778,91.63000000000002,90.78571428571428,5.022222222222221,19.698412698412696,6.691623216298621,0.4091698412698413,1035,32,201,14,36,322,164,252,0.10400000000000001,0.6829999999999999,0.213,0.9832,0,0,3,0,0,1,53.0,7,8,0,3,9,21,3,1,6,0,22,12,1,1,3,36,51,13,2,7,4,0,2,0,3,5,2,4,2,2,10,17,2,0,4,4,1,5,6,8,0,1,8,6,28,13,23,36,12,29,0,4,0,7,42,11,2,3,12,119,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965657960692048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394815523115646,0.0,0.08400814195812166,0.0,0.0,0.06909775739493933,0.0,0.16433575882742368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430384190103444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175838725601744,0.0,0.1832390744467951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174689911046724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195926183414113,0.1053167202429141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021905177570248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586627895876693,0.0,0.0,0.08471319266884395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173211696630669,0.0,0.2082797454073104,0.16615056233099404,0.04694879624230712,0.08620310292469606,0.10214044281566656,0.0,0.07187025367360668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804980328871044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10128016398903487,0.0,0.060232104251660035,0.0,0.09013816443528704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3847933231400692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994181633160098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951500928704936,0.0,0.0,0.06347166109665273,0.0,0.0,0.07934913347078715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4055164500183515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027770765069014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642334445484164,0.19989294327250115,0.0,0.08678855891475078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060892311226119065,0.0,0.0,0.10543281968661042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229847882213711,0.07846338073857502,0.09388588426464124,0.0986406718827502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575674202356071,0.0,0.08872714721961565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547863041714768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151763884456044,0.09224128572070296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075387502774756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578014016782803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829362662379937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222707194876951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575794630190643,0.0,0.0,0.05239881975624462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983915943500407,0.06100989270633929,0.0,0.0,0.09354873436955444,0.10809202403913848,0.07761127129289262,0.09896947559692773,0.0,0.053002495736683565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057867701252798436
mentalhealth,bluebird992,2020/03/21,When will it get over? Does anyone ever come out of their childhood PTSD? or does it grow on you while you continue your life believing it might end one day just to feel the sun kissed breeze on your skin? When will anyone ever completely come of trauma? Is there a beautiful life at any point? If so when ? Is therapy really helpful to move on with that pain while the abuser still dominates your life? ...... I've lost all hopes on holding on to life.... Am I supposed to let go? Is this all my life is about ? Pain.. Frustration.. Fear.. Confusion.. Is death the break I need?,0.8475000000000001,3.4149956363636385,1.8948863636363635,93.72232954545456,92.63636363636364,6.0227272727272725,17.784090909090907,7.413659706084162,0.5674090909090911,440,12,91,9,16,138,75,110,0.134,0.759,0.106,-0.6737,0,0,0,0,1,0,28.0,0,5,1,1,10,9,1,2,4,0,10,9,1,0,4,17,18,8,1,3,3,0,2,0,0,3,7,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,7,0,1,1,2,9,2,16,13,2,27,0,1,0,1,7,9,0,5,12,60,14,0,0.0,0.17215402936323562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880742657398477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20319107702401648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16370076543235312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25032222655462044,0.15234188653967504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370500400626706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543020136840565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12869064611218406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628601977587243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635003210743686,0.07346688885268736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591205753440486,0.0,0.08257603806916522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973899935532319,0.0,0.0,0.14431341238430592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857675465566633,0.5131403544518837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15860961635729326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413791113626366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544284733298678,0.0,0.10773641232537487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845748992888094,0.0,0.30921401945883203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373533021318734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984524983205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308143481418296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603494042512892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661605963975386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BillClintonSTD,2020/03/21,"I think I have schizophrenia. Maybe I’m just stressed? So when I was younger my mom told me I use to hear voices all the time, kind of stopped around the end of middle school/beginning of high school. Never really paid attention to it much, but recently it’s been really bad. 
I hear a voice or voices that will like whisper to me. I can never make out what they sound like, but I can hear them if that makes sense? They tell me to crazy shit like beat up my boss for literally no reason or destroy a car that I’m walking by. I was always pretty good with suppressing them, but a little more recently it’s been so bad it makes me want to tear the hair out of my head. 
I did just move maybe a month ago, maybe it’s just stress? I don’t have insurance so I don’t want to make an unnecessary trip and spend thousands of dollars.",2.9402564102564104,4.162641064327489,3.8932163742690062,90.57858299595144,74.02923976608187,7.600719748088169,23.09536662168241,8.139509932561175,0.9533874044084568,646,17,146,10,13,208,100,171,0.18,0.7090000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.9399,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,4,1,8,11,2,2,8,0,12,3,3,7,3,30,27,11,0,3,9,1,1,3,0,1,0,8,0,0,9,5,0,2,3,0,3,4,5,6,0,1,7,9,22,5,18,19,3,21,0,0,0,0,10,7,1,3,13,90,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059844845815072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948514833865972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643551409426268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19965852454301955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058964296700644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002829193370222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270508889631004,0.0,0.4042651353476826,0.0,0.0,0.12632380017405945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12450540731658262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523583776164914,0.11983251771481455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3192342101011954,0.0,0.3603482485103009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14002955026366598,0.0954332346913509,0.12707546709164802,0.08789181498833512,0.0,0.18442714516429384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163752071902345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531889366193116,0.12292963225081928,0.2361060696520665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420062212024527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272865810315188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995917199382913,0.27391569671207794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450244365046107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766104914455215,0.0,0.0,0.06971755418007433,0.0,0.0,0.1142465991294734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326316578345926,0.0,0.0,0.14104151144591456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tozwoll,2020/03/21,"COVID-19 This whole situation has made my mental health worse. I'm an an anxious and stressed out mess who  has begun to self-medicate with alcohol once again and I've completely withdrawn from family life especially with how dynamics are at the moment. I know I want to break down in order to let it all out but I am just unable to due to being a thinking personality type and how numb I am with the medication I'm currently prescribed. 

I haven't told my family much, if anything, at all apart from being worried because I don't want to burden them and/or let them know how things really are with me. I deep down just want somebody to hold me tight, tell me things will eventually return back to normality and help me.",6.80908273381295,6.904057776978419,7.400638489208635,72.95045413669068,64.75539568345323,10.978776978417267,32.48291366906475,10.686352973137794,3.3977978417266184,577,21,108,14,8,191,90,139,0.09300000000000001,0.8170000000000001,0.09,-0.1303,1,0,1,1,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,0,7,5,0,1,5,0,13,5,0,4,2,29,23,9,0,5,4,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,5,10,1,2,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,1,15,1,21,16,4,18,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,1,7,76,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731089485815463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18299297484682275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13329696261852167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455376548212055,0.0,0.09874241141346778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16983450797398109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054034611458941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17217874677582412,0.0,0.0,0.1085727767484007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17804157886085298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3312740914068218,0.11441231508871115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327080016270292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799249166663988,0.1631793074903135,0.16323924109844404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907503125140052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870746597047136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17250499784310494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143598709851285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037694887614635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689820184684717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18207397887659224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855492468244548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157895982894286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21522660564856488,0.1037911967601458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478025301347756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866226346343396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18084654626851795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450006347683,0.16507297438072174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,baileeTheGreat,2020/03/21,I don’t enjoy anything anymore Idk how to explain it but I just feel like nothing makes me happy anymore for example I used to love video games would spend almost all my time on them and put hours in them now I just don’t enjoy them I used to skateboard a lot but then I just lost interest I feel like I don’t have fun with anything anymore any suggestions ?,2.9401801801801817,4.5250568918918965,3.890270270270271,89.1382882882883,74.67567567567569,6.554954954954956,27.1981981981982,7.1686216300943375,1.2924036036036033,286,11,59,3,6,92,49,74,0.09300000000000001,0.596,0.311,0.9683,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,3,1,5,9,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,4,1,18,13,5,0,1,5,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,1,1,3,1,0,0,1,2,13,8,7,11,2,7,0,1,0,1,7,2,0,2,6,38,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18896261345774026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832710311235376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5614393510631316,0.0,0.0,0.3105792546336297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19083166818606145,0.2696243682284053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20088191023774166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18583819761162806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843852326729992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20599577682202555,0.16043178324297808,0.17031526532971705,0.0,0.12596326226392238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18106927545204005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897024671130068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003645954861947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3259641936160041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340519048983342,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nxnasxmonova,2020/03/21,"Caffeine anxiety In the past few months, I have grown obsessed with checking my drinks caffeine content and focusing on only that. I cant enjoy drinks anymore after 3, and whenever I do drink something with even small caffeine contents, I freak out, and my mind plays games on me, whereas if I never knew about the caffeine I would have been completely fine. I don't know what to do, and I always fall back into the same routine, searching for the drink, and freaking out. What do I do?",5.946992753623189,6.875488989130435,5.78130434782609,80.92384057971016,66.71739130434783,7.872463768115942,34.89855072463768,7.793537801064563,2.6506898550724647,385,18,68,4,6,120,62,92,0.131,0.8240000000000001,0.046,-0.7674,0,0,5,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,4,0,10,4,0,0,1,17,12,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,10,4,0,2,6,1,2,3,3,0,0,2,0,12,3,12,9,2,14,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,1,5,52,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16680708674045186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335898972698275,0.0,0.19881235711462802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15414904410332478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21018896505144788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7855370618700953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324085343394624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017306095007973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20241753716564895,0.0,0.16001322934044415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461481092630353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524664570289685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19137128422488467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15433158844223482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14240812549785253,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moremental_health,2020/03/21,"Need a hand? I've got you. Hey all. In times like these we can get especially stressed out, but always remember that you are not alone. Here are some great notes for you to remember to make sure you’re living your best life! 

- Text MIND to 38383 (awesome mental health resources)

- Crank up your favorite song (dance it out!)

- Watch a LMAO-worthy video (RIP Vine)

- Clean up your life (KIDDING. Maybe your room!)

- Reach our to me or a trusted friend. You got this!

These help me a lot - hope they help you too :)",1.0436558287073725,3.6320603917525816,1.0663917525773208,100.70689928628073,89.41237113402063,4.22172878667724,16.73988897700238,5.8734145424116955,-0.6910390166534497,386,9,85,3,13,113,74,97,0.013999999999999999,0.575,0.41100000000000003,0.9948,0,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,2,9,1,1,2,8,0,1,4,0,3,4,1,1,2,16,9,2,0,2,3,0,1,1,1,0,3,1,2,1,5,3,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,3,14,7,10,7,4,8,0,0,1,0,17,6,0,4,2,45,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997874417586893,0.0,0.0,0.16050923091968106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20243788252037492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149034969598187,0.0,0.1007829024415275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085613836423676,0.21267422687405266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050449289793448,0.0,0.0,0.25859518337012266,0.0,0.0,0.1915943926923553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725036098941011,0.09424177048330412,0.0,0.1703352719872228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399768110958884,0.0,0.0,0.12876303247839402,0.0,0.1937951583645787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19439901395758308,0.0,0.1947751972053071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14303377731353653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4370388557717034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22096764467002927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181807074918228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248222664303342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shannwan,2020/03/21,"My social anxiety has gotten so bad that it feels like I'm never at peace or alone I over analyse to the point of redundancy when I feel like I have something to prove (which is most of the time). And the same parts of me that are telling me things i've said to someone over texts need to be worked on to become :more easily understandable, relevant to context, and funny) are also telling me that the mistakes I'm making are the result of a warped mind and now I think as dramatic as it sounds I'm either deranged or retarded the fact im either obsessing but its an obsession. I can have days of going over the same self refining rituals where i put myself under scrutiny to become my idea of perfection and i convince myself of things and then start acting in accordance with those ideas to seem as natural and unstifled... so nobody suspects anything",6.316545454545455,6.745047109090907,7.007424242424246,74.21113636363638,65.7878787878788,10.721212121212124,32.25757575757576,10.577609850970193,3.483557575757576,683,26,123,17,10,226,106,165,0.115,0.792,0.09300000000000001,-0.2003,0,1,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,6,8,0,2,9,0,9,0,0,2,4,32,23,17,0,2,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,10,7,0,0,9,0,0,3,1,4,0,0,2,4,14,4,26,20,7,19,1,0,0,0,5,9,0,4,9,92,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16775313703400185,0.0,0.12952817252074944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390739303574165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328835516415874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523904279100352,0.0,0.35776854987269663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10445791348897457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16379483681714305,0.23142426943958694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205186779901567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656911507136833,0.17495650453726855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582617255523777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811691887196506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16354456546408788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009946488603565,0.12492204194027523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17539883929168426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15311497506106114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16282561977233687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407153855795336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14745234062525114,0.1689711067043658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651090654867664,0.13723752635310288,0.12469321049249027,0.0,0.0,0.11464392723238935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831396351536998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21521270770858625,0.10378449459700692,0.0,0.0,0.09444660892514664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16861755229497855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179168374019942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spawn-0f-Satan,2020/03/21,"How do you know if you have mental health issues? I have been feeling very sad over the past 5 months for no apparent reason, I have been distancing myself from friends and family and I find it a lot harder to talk to people. I have been very stressed lately although nothing major has happened. Could I be experiencing som mild form of some sort of mental illness/issue?",7.303857142857139,7.455862100000001,7.249285714285714,74.25821428571432,63.71428571428571,9.285714285714286,31.785714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.6271428571428572,297,10,51,4,4,95,55,70,0.12300000000000001,0.8109999999999999,0.065,-0.6182,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,11,1,0,2,0,12,14,5,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,8,1,7,9,4,4,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,4,3,38,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16120160856309695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19033439903385208,0.0,0.1020872683437968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845339580189385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598829778494888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17854048597047673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146114400342242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4214646093696333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095957062297436,0.0,0.22775324778642164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716491048103306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4069376651677433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16115554082368772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19372956163508956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19273745636224,0.1399728088833515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20758796904149449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23127704088884254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16228046541798982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33317912330304505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway213807,2020/03/21,"Could I have PPD? Need a second opinion before going to someone about it. I've had this problem because something happened in my life a time ago.

I can never trust people, like never. I can't message members of my family due to being scared of *something?* I don't know what it is. I just can't speak to new people or tell people about my interests or what I do, it's fucking annoying. If I do accidentally say something and then I realise I say it (this could be anything) I would immediately be crying inside (eh) and then have tension headaches. I say something funny to someone and then I think they'll do something. 

Any pictures of me is a no go, someone could take one and do *something* with it; even family members.

Sometimes when I go outside I always think someone is spying on me, speaking about me, taking pictures of me. I always think someone is going through my stuff or is going to plan something against me. 

If someone does something (literally anything) I just can't respond as I think my answers could make them want to do something, but I also think me not responding can lead them to do something, causing more tension headaches.

If I say something slightly offensive to someone and they laughed (like a banter insult) I would immediately get worried, and they would do something.

​

Something is something, I don't know what it is, but they might do it.",4.113369145543056,6.430583664092666,4.83880476750042,80.42761121369819,73.36293436293438,6.0487493704885,33.65469195903978,6.895973343053719,2.3489370824240394,1095,58,183,10,23,352,117,259,0.107,0.858,0.035,-0.9258,0,0,14,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,6,2,8,13,4,3,4,0,37,2,0,3,2,43,57,20,0,13,11,0,0,2,0,5,1,6,0,0,13,7,0,0,8,0,0,6,9,8,0,2,1,6,38,5,21,44,1,18,0,0,0,1,17,2,1,8,12,141,51,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05747302176165256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05184916315606577,0.10789715339950212,0.0702495585816083,0.07878258956071102,0.04409056503585298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670867254925616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03952329985341914,0.0,0.05517048756664617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660422300117454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070644315513004,0.0,0.07121907816499369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05673824256868858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04282343220602403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224283768600445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0599396492523413,0.033874027750534816,0.0,0.1842383868871149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05733408085363378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712641164719813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04579544059583539,0.06335099052070109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04327839772174381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878053432911996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04807492168419751,0.10001072675232313,0.06261881642149478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043934413773297584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484693342587872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062039101127958136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062401112559956,0.06491194314231062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845461207069777,0.6987926939168648,0.06412426073336919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422147533521829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749690033192544,0.0,0.05666934402506683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077208026913226,0.0,0.0,0.037806274421980327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03824183270143399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584389870201672,0.0,0.13817246912973444,0.0,0.07878258956071102,0.0
mentalhealth,LadyMadrigal,2020/03/21,"How do I tell a friend the friendship has become toxic for me? One, I’m really glad this is a subreddit. 💛
Two, onto my question and a little background. I have two friends that I have declared for myself as toxic friendships. I haven’t told them and am not quite sure how. I have stepped back from talking to them and seeing them. One of them is giving me space and the other is hounding my fiancé about me and came to see me at my work since I haven’t been hanging out with her. I am trying to tell myself to give them credit and they can handle me telling them I need to step back from our friendship because it’s causing me a lot of stress (for various reasons that I won’t go into too much detail to keep the post short), but the one who asks my fiancé about me also relies on me for a lot emotionally and tells me how sad she’s been if I don’t talk to her about things going on with her. I have a counseling appointment next week (finally recently got affordable health care) and plan to talk with him about it, but had a panic attack in my shower over it yesterday, so reaching out earlier to some of you who have maybe had to break off a toxic friendship before. I just don’t have the energy in me to really be anyone’s person but my own right now... Thoughts, feelings, ideas on help with wording, etc.?",5.065772471910113,5.086724835205995,5.8117579588015005,83.11741221910114,68.43820224719101,8.622565543071161,27.923455056179773,8.278499904357787,1.7304308988764046,1029,30,211,13,16,337,148,267,0.061,0.83,0.109,0.8279,2,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,1,7,3,14,10,1,2,13,0,24,1,0,5,1,38,40,18,0,2,6,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,10,16,0,1,5,0,1,6,6,4,0,5,8,3,44,6,41,30,7,32,0,1,2,0,32,16,0,5,8,167,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997826601562317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867315758514792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10518640809594966,0.12800214270715018,0.0,0.1730342973537543,0.0,0.06858814629894654,0.12426406211865768,0.09574204296299373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12868727314209208,0.1147166192146767,0.11558397725581157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656431693196624,0.0,0.0,0.1254840522996356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056891003371322836,0.0,0.0,0.12325476659739792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17385773797540688,0.0,0.0,0.2158694277012902,0.1278898217563903,0.0,0.08998858511404753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959826486290134,0.0,0.0,0.07541648405283399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701582597100305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000856973662768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127696654105878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913125889031086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303651738478054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271152736815529,0.08342850354133279,0.0,0.0,0.11966106029903426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287293832208218,0.0,0.0,0.13201219952931387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824382487913992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077583412341769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604263594973758,0.1196736335978422,0.0,0.0,0.14416007822080368,0.11568423798757987,0.11109506411038557,0.0,0.0,0.09608726054748068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793198971672539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307363396829617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888563996644753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604412802722836,0.0,0.0,0.271306069453342,0.3933725446075441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475001726378748,0.0,0.0,0.08932440267422498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751297731046093,0.0,0.07639035125069436,0.0,0.219821761294398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025280755262564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191231573021678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dispose3848f,2020/03/21,"Someone manipulated my thoughts Someone has used dark NLP to get into my head.
What are some ways to deal with this?",3.9804545454545455,6.365177045454548,4.2545454545454575,84.1518181818182,74.0,6.218181818181819,29.181818181818183,7.1686216300943375,1.526472727272728,93,4,18,1,2,29,19,22,0.11,0.89,0.0,-0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,2,0,6,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,4,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3824395413935028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938092976778273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807080699469941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6286199489120449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29449777721545056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32038704258841433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29444775559683856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CullertonA1,2020/03/21,"Am I depressed? For the past 3 months I have been dealing with cascading health issues in my life that have seriously affected my mood and well-being. First there was a panic attack, then there was residual anxiety for two months after the attack, then I got severe sciatica pain out of nowhere and it has been constant for 2+ weeks, and since then, I’ve been stuck in a fog of anxiety, sadness, rumination, and negative thoughts. Worst of all, I’ve started experiencing significant cognitive issues which scares the crap out of me and causes more anxiety (short term memory issues, trouble putting sentences and words together in my head, and trouble concentrating), all at 30 years old.   

It’s all taken a massive toll on my mental health and I feel completely trapped and miserable. I spend all day sitting around trying to figure out how I can feel better and nothing comes to me. I’ve even cried a few times which is something I never do. I’ve never been depressed in my life, and besides for the past three months of health issues, I have a pretty great life.   

I saw my GP who didn’t do much for me except tell me my sciatica can take months to resolve. He also said if the anxiety continues he can give me an SSRI to help, which is something I don’t want to do unless absolutely necessary. I am just so lost, stuck, and sad. Any advice or encouragement is highly appreciated.",8.460692307692309,7.550895069230767,8.684615384615388,68.42038461538465,61.769230769230774,11.846153846153848,36.92307692307692,11.051253699011982,4.084576923076924,1098,44,194,25,13,363,150,260,0.247,0.665,0.08800000000000001,-0.9917,0,1,2,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,4,8,21,3,3,11,0,23,9,2,3,6,39,38,21,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,7,18,0,0,5,0,1,2,5,16,0,3,15,5,23,4,29,23,9,37,0,6,1,0,9,12,1,2,22,131,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501798408964814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775966793288606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612387717505817,0.0,0.2975413780456269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656073745249344,0.0,0.22124018504374504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859974218885363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998882517719734,0.0,0.08376028369937777,0.1019501928493539,0.10507767209058416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680928160647248,0.06270923543342373,0.10024614160457414,0.1674986077429718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422352195085182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833097983361104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270897049155447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327772004408208,0.0,0.0,0.07776858574940307,0.10720313510463396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09979228337856924,0.3100722576541027,0.0,0.0,0.06517530306258543,0.10273527021426232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4059568707915613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20604218294827592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10614468116867376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799111092969498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3104516849533591,0.0,0.07147971601556351,0.0,0.1499889376918025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933006530949646,0.0,0.10203292206447807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346605792931987,0.11408560370242038,0.0,0.0,0.18564570530883934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989240629401834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774912961452492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924937906790595,0.0,0.09735029142961106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10984910721776696,0.0,0.08043470041337594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14971418885460253,0.0,0.0,0.06882420664650762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310944027656192,0.0,0.08498863058020555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719459595993004,0.056699147409264024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601692397027442,0.0,0.0949855332825962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05735236657644309,0.0,0.07799692810355205,0.0,0.08742692462028352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626168554717619
mentalhealth,eveningstar123,2020/03/21,"I've had it, I can't continue anymore. When I was in 12th grade, I got a 'D' on one of my exams because I completely blanked out; all the elite universities I had applied to rescinded my admission, and I thought I'd hit a dead-end. Started community college, worked really hard, sacrificed my social life, and transferred into a top-tier school. Here also I worked really hard, and now I am one quarter away from graduating. I am a psyc major, interested in cogsci, so I took a lot of math courses; this quarter I took three and I am sure I'm going to flunk each one of them. My gpa is going to plunge, and my grad school plans are thwarted. Moreover,  I couldn't get into the one class I need to graduate -- so now if I don't somehow get off the waitlist, I will have to stay back and pay full out-of-state tuition for a single course. Moreover, I am on an immigrant visa, and if I don't complete certain paperwork, I won't be able to stay or work here. I don't have any home or family in my ""home"" country; in fact, I haven't gone back in 12 years. In the past few years, I've had a single-minded focus on my education -- spend 16+ hours studying in the library, have no friends, no moments that I have enjoyed -- turned into a bitter and lonely person.  And yet, I have nothing to show for it - no internships, no job offers, no stellar academic achievements -- I don't even know if I'll get a degree. The only silver lining was a research project with a professor in a field that I deeply passionate about but with the current circumstances, I don't think that will continue. Even if it does, nothing really changes. My family has invested so much financially, and I have achieved nothing. I can't even be with them anymore, in spite of their best efforts. I really thought I had finally overcome my 12th grade debacle but I failed again - this time even more miserably. All my peers have graduated, are working, in steady relationships, and I feel spent, burnt out, worthless, and lonely. I have nothing. What was the point of all this? Of coming so close to my dream, only to see that I don't have it in me to pursue it? Or that in spite of all the sacrifice, I will never make it. The only few moments that I think I've enjoyed in the past few years was when I might've had a little wine (very lightweight) and felt like I had no care in the world! Other than that, I have nothing. I wish I had gone to parties, hooked up, developed friendships --  there's nothing joyful in my life anymore. The only constant is anxiety, inadequacy, paranoia, and self-hate. I'M SICK OF THIS. Nothing changes, nothing gets better. I just want this to end.",5.324140473887817,5.6825646460348205,6.185599008704063,79.49095170454547,67.91682785299807,9.247799806576404,32.59725580270793,9.188382445141503,2.7634816731141205,2050,85,402,36,32,678,245,517,0.141,0.7829999999999999,0.076,-0.981,2,4,1,0,0,1,95.0,0,0,3,12,23,21,3,1,27,0,46,5,0,1,8,57,77,30,0,8,10,0,4,1,1,4,3,0,2,1,20,25,1,0,7,3,6,7,18,9,0,7,20,6,58,12,54,49,15,65,1,6,1,1,8,31,0,9,26,278,78,27,0.07127749659262386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700058827327108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04847114189249016,0.0,0.05452708979826978,0.0,0.21206437135561626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696755436047927,0.10961599036486833,0.0,0.04345010034905879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748013352018784,0.06303915343185433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267215817230835,0.0,0.1508042806724494,0.061399251973675566,0.14946619813248788,0.07702565202205683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06237541759877844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626141139844785,0.0,0.0,0.1883124570613902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438816050555824,0.0,0.03604004392637429,0.0,0.0684375745330289,0.0780810135007106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05506881705598613,0.0,0.14895820039785593,0.0,0.0810172878082834,0.0,0.05700712534835248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770127323972952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299428138848666,0.0,0.0701939763854195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073191707002965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03917224805973192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069080753874704,0.034822584469735365,0.07143877685603936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060597578695649724,0.0,0.0,0.0475782824544082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561415999538837,0.0719699526283069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05239716128944963,0.05285136056955067,0.05497359949051436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5471414427626902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931979054690908,0.21683899218279415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608487142902095,0.0,0.062236760723471424,0.0,0.0,0.06738027320295599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826487579273823,0.0,0.0,0.07652535648203096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442732637513296,0.056798936455728026,0.0,0.0743579739904971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265843158937567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05045057895152078,0.15194465519008746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717819700402486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09134348351476748,0.0,0.11317274104182698,0.04156248146160275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15838384270725242,0.0,0.07752944844438238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05881139947223524,0.04204131422658728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196560342979675,0.0,0.0,0.2075634657212697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377011126433838
mentalhealth,juhugcfvg,2020/03/21,"I’m not sure where to put this... Hi, I’m a high school senior. As you may or may not know, the college application process can be extremely stressful. Well I recently had to learn this the hard way. You see, I’ve been rejected from a total of 6 schools thus far. Mind you these quite competitive, but I’m also not a particularly bad student. I just received a decision from my dream school: rejected. My best friend, she got in. All my other friends already know where they’re going. And I just feel awful. 

Someone please just tell me everything is going to be okay. Please.",1.9338253638253635,4.571252846846849,3.260720720720723,86.89278586278591,83.5945945945946,6.658627858627857,24.75467775467776,7.882392219407189,1.6029010395010397,450,18,89,9,13,146,79,111,0.12,0.631,0.249,0.9566,0,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,3,0,2,7,10,0,1,6,2,8,0,0,1,3,21,18,5,0,0,8,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,5,1,0,4,3,4,1,0,3,3,11,6,8,11,3,12,0,2,1,0,9,5,0,3,2,53,15,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18367748418465013,0.13310693958122985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389755969491641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17467498331031478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495910823513422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416018316186892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25719179140886783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891903848716794,0.0,0.13312220486329548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14910307223563807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17585951392016955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18294892083395206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16806318015935584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3654158169487817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16732437053291135,0.0,0.17703598682384433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16434550965614686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5053572212957362,0.132636045207904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410292971255626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19066352188786687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15687354254874866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14548128633335605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211721990016506,0.0,0.0,0.14965509347659198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Xxpyro_mp4,2020/03/22,I’m confused with how I’m feeling. About a week ago I M 15 was dating a girl F 15(for six months) but around the last week of our sixth month together I wanted to talk to new people (girls) but I still loved my girlfriend a lot. I went to a therapist for help and she told me to breakup with her. I eventually did but I cried all night because I didn’t believe I could make it through the school year seeing her. So in the morning I said sorry and we got back together. She came over and I felt great but by the end of the day I felt nothing for her. It’s like everything had disappeared. And then ever since then I’ve either felt really happy with the new people I’m talking to or really down because I miss her so much and I feel like I still love her. We’ve gotten into several arguments since then and I agreed that I won’t text her unless she does first m. But I’ve been crying almost every night because I miss her so much. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Someone help me understand what’s going on please.,2.4715942825728408,3.8295559999999997,3.931561297416163,89.29625893347993,75.44859813084112,7.0913688840022004,22.86860912589335,7.724431198458867,0.8836781748213309,800,22,175,11,17,265,124,214,0.11199999999999999,0.6990000000000001,0.18899999999999997,0.97,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,2,0,0,1,10,10,0,1,10,0,8,2,0,2,2,38,32,20,0,2,8,0,5,2,1,1,0,1,0,2,5,14,0,0,7,0,0,4,3,4,0,2,14,7,34,6,23,16,5,32,0,2,1,2,23,6,0,4,24,110,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852790135250594,0.0,0.11130081938616404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989471984931706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085467604281825,0.0,0.20326829891941398,0.0,0.0,0.12522815641661575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712616059612436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874435021925242,0.0,0.24418644062104525,0.07168265137749479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972682450890774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844604158159233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054167393076344,0.09364879504566984,0.0,0.09989458760789258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240171082142277,0.07940568920266773,0.3201647233434004,0.0,0.0,0.09454426061105478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316919156900973,0.0,0.0888969285283935,0.12254343251303768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832140125601474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14900320488894872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06108521548461359,0.09060220707328732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10860469753083153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449588256525827,0.20063469951328575,0.0,0.0741935880647853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743797822008056,0.0,0.1634162983583429,0.0,0.0,0.2146990145315204,0.0,0.2086137720780957,0.0,0.10665156643791954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15411503747935046,0.0,0.0,0.1220094866810494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241126420646294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572924555696518,0.0,0.0,0.11248988558787827,0.08857227870620113,0.0,0.0,0.1255680316048517,0.0,0.18388910496306685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941771612020335,0.0,0.0,0.12442349266779194,0.0,0.0,0.1775293063654658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786765601803582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905389077697535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620873133775792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571122582841185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555923813388131,0.0,0.17831589133942646,0.0,0.0,0.10303730240006226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152524012780315,0.0,0.07157705224938707
mentalhealth,Continuedquestioner,2020/03/22,"New here, but within a week my life has flipped and I'm feeling really scared about the future. Within a weeks time I had my University shut down,  my mom get mentally ill, and now I'm uncertain when I will see my fiancé who lives across the world from me right now. I honestly have no idea what I'm going to do anymore. I know how important it is for me to stay strong for everyone but I also know how much this whole situation is upsetting me. 

It started 9-10 days ago when my Dad told me to keep an eye on my Mom who hadn't been sleeping and had been a bit off. Little did I know she had been hiding her depression for at least a month so once we started to address it it snowballed. It went from getting her sleeping pills, to her arranging appointments to see a therapist, then days later not being able to form a sentence, walking around emotionless and trying to run away from home. It was 7 days from being functional to submitting her into the hospital for psychiatric help. I know this happened one time over 30 years ago so my Dad was able to recognize it once she showed any symptoms, but she was so good at acting like everything was fine up until that point. We found out this afternoon that with the epidemic we are no longer allowed to visit her since the hospitals shut down access to non-patients. 

I have spent the day calling specific people who she is close with, stress cleaning and cooking, and listening to my Dad sob after every conversation with my Mom on the phone. My fiancé has been incredibly supportive of me, but I just can't help but wish he was here and not in a country where he cannot be flying back and forth from due to this epidemic. I was suppose to be going out to spend the summer with him in 6 weeks, but my Dad is saying my mom won't be out for probably 6+ weeks and I want to be here for her when she improves. She isn't ready to talk with me yet since she feels so guilty, but I just really flipping miss her being here. I'm so scared that she won't get better, and that I will never get a chance to see my fiancé in the next few months. 

I am really struggling to focus on school now, and being home all the time self isolating is making me struggle more. I just feel so damn alone right now, and I just dont know how these next few months will go.",7.451472140762463,5.661239974193553,7.6506011730205294,77.85771994134898,64.31182795698925,11.293255131964813,32.964320625610945,10.125756701596842,2.9221827956989244,1808,55,376,33,22,591,227,465,0.14300000000000002,0.777,0.079,-0.9874,2,1,0,0,0,0,35.0,3,0,0,2,30,18,1,7,19,0,44,8,3,5,2,60,80,34,0,2,13,8,3,1,0,5,4,2,4,1,20,26,1,1,10,2,2,8,12,11,0,1,19,9,55,7,62,48,9,80,0,3,4,0,43,31,2,1,41,262,75,1,0.15837829882013116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403928059043149,0.0,0.0,0.08201607659092995,0.0,0.06332753417297778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05385133711048582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853435745557767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049513204958824,0.0,0.0,0.07440081261815068,0.06089156784186325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003636741523493,0.08645404134591095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086097542536101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20428180085845984,0.0,0.06820549834989216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09280909333858657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672027377798859,0.07566862583776192,0.07117010134393646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120121239928325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682681495696846,0.0,0.0,0.16549224862059755,0.0,0.13501505557321367,0.06642010142141698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07002670329713889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615763522787648,0.0,0.1588663470937565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939491074756943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038695451729701,0.0,0.0,0.21760142770300894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05593363812970352,0.038687818403317344,0.07936833144488786,0.06992546974156019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0528593721450415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980403711862913,0.0,0.0,0.370981498823378,0.18962407065168027,0.0,0.05821313643670981,0.0,0.06107555388125049,0.07648137395906482,0.16843711755783522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686677193349364,0.05366061707155547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054899785357156505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485934238762383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537929667144949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15219179059844212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352542018280693,0.0,0.06297439003060769,0.1585643064365701,0.080143646909901,0.1893104982782572,0.0,0.08261155334645406,0.0,0.0,0.13101216542019353,0.08901192183221049,0.15849267773342626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121009750735192,0.0844050968195332,0.0,0.0,0.0907109030970226,0.1655713855421856,0.0,0.0,0.08986290831666527,0.0,0.08230784722082675,0.0,0.06364923866414432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919447059682437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13852748952983882,0.0,0.0,0.07566862583776192,0.0,0.053764234337147096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04670781204217066,0.0,0.254083036163586,0.0,0.0,0.07340913486526943,0.0,0.08841185730877704,0.09106361371788213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509952159018336
mentalhealth,ThatIsASpicyMeatball,2020/03/22,"Dealing with a partner whose issues are too great to bear Some background: I (19M) met my current girlfriend (19F) online, and she's a wonderful person, but she comes with some baggage, so to speak. She suffers from severe depression, borderline personality disorder, and she's a diagnosed sociopath. I thought I could handle it. I was wrong.

Several days ago, her depression flared up in spite of the strong dose of Lexapro. I had to pin her down so she couldn't harm herself. She refuses to see professionals because she's been in and out of crisis centers since she was 13, and she thinks that nothing they tell her will work, while not implementing any of those things because she doesn't want to. I make $16 an hour doing good work, but that good work comes with long hours, hours where I worry she'll take her life. One instance saw me leaving work to make sure she was okay because her depression got that bad, much to my boss' annoyance. I had to work that Saturday to make up for the lost hours. Despite that healthy wage for someone without a degree, we find ourselves living paycheck to paycheck because she's a big spender, yet unemployed. Not relevant to this sub, but our visions of our ideal futures are wholly incompatible. I love this girl, and I want to be with her, but I don't know if I can sustain this lifestyle. I'm afraid if I leave her, she'll kill herself. Do any of you who are/have been either in her shoes or mine have any advice for me?",5.761099290780141,6.4764168120567405,5.7512056737588635,81.73333333333333,67.04964539007092,8.678014184397162,33.04255319148936,8.680891452615391,2.5787574468085106,1159,49,223,17,18,364,165,282,0.20800000000000002,0.6729999999999999,0.11900000000000001,-0.9852,4,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,3,1,1,8,5,20,3,1,8,1,21,5,1,4,1,42,40,15,1,7,11,0,0,0,2,3,3,1,0,4,13,13,0,1,5,0,2,2,6,12,0,1,12,3,47,8,34,22,4,24,0,5,2,1,42,10,0,6,12,146,60,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889496548599352,0.08971086594055132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20646571110762665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450076065328348,0.2467710481194191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435584315768374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080282230936002,0.0,0.0,0.06526793567826414,0.1043364454536818,0.2614994812360658,0.10271950171556612,0.0,0.0,0.11598806866599605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924982371625084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697695199121717,0.08094174673633853,0.11157730242056473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3986605550998445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105630242291436,0.0,0.0,0.11196676489638692,0.0,0.05561883996375696,0.0,0.0,0.21431995367760584,0.0,0.0,0.07148308034018602,0.0,0.0,0.08936461382630413,0.08956198215662839,0.0,0.0,0.11047566080536754,0.0,0.09134018072029804,0.0,0.2026625232394384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439627472666946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710756291084503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068578163865099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767341220377783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064614908048141,0.0,0.0,0.2286624741842277,0.0,0.08371664582729939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574946352536349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538317490799038,0.0,0.07609249598506894,0.0,0.08845638821384938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723516052879834,0.06484716659091193,0.0,0.08034433666746471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938498522060975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755663807974167,0.10975096367446907,0.3683870518699388,0.10277714636193194,0.0,0.0,0.11065022573142806,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Folk_us,2020/03/22,"The last year… Long post so apologies in advance. 
A year ago I was made redundant from a job I was good at but hated after 9 years. Things were stressful but looking good. I would have redundancy pay, partner had a good job and I had a new job to go to. That’s when the good times ended. 
First my partner lost her job then we had to move from our (private rented) home of 4 years that we loved within 2 months. Once we finally found a new home my new job was even worse than the last one and my partner still hadn’t found a new job. The new house has constantly sprung issues with us 3 (inc small child) living with mould, cold, utility issues, nightmare neighbours and leeks to mention but a few things. Plus all redundancy money completely gone. When my partner finally found a new job I had to quit mine mainly due to travel issues. 
After a few months of more struggle I landed on my feet with a new position for a good company with lots of training and good people. It’s hard work but it was ok. Things were looking good again!
Then my partner lost her job again before Christmas, enter more months of financial struggle and continued issues with the house. 
After several months my partner got a temp job which required the hard decision for another car but income was income. A light at the end of the tunnel!
Fast forward to today, Covid-19 forced my partners workplace to lock down and laying off my partner. No schools, no childcare, one income that won’t cover the bills. My workplace has turned sour and with it my confidence. I now have to work from home but go in once a week with my child (6yrs) much to my managers distaste even though this possibility was covered in the last meeting. They say my partner can stay at home and save on childcare but what we save does not pay the rent and they’re not getting it. 
I’m now in the position where I’m all out of ideas and feel completely trapped with no hope for the future and ever getting to a better place. If anything should happen I have no money, no backup and no plan. I’m constantly getting things wrong at work which only makes me feel more of a compete failure. 
It’s been 5 years since coming off antidepressants and counselling and I hoped I’d never have to do it again. 
Now with the pandemic issues closing the entire economy will things ever get better or is this it for the rest of my life?",4.3090807453416184,5.876427026086957,4.670496894409936,84.98630434782609,71.13043478260869,7.257142857142857,27.490683229813666,7.760100539840176,1.605985714285714,1872,66,358,23,35,590,217,460,0.134,0.746,0.11900000000000001,-0.5716,15,1,0,0,0,0,42.0,6,0,1,13,16,22,1,3,32,1,27,3,1,2,5,64,56,30,0,5,11,0,4,0,10,4,1,1,6,11,20,31,0,1,7,1,7,10,11,7,0,3,22,10,35,15,56,30,11,83,0,2,2,1,26,21,0,5,52,234,55,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0469895983312943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055584934858400416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043622185747859483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045107060165542036,0.0,0.0,0.09376494051035104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045662868989152894,0.11115860868397467,0.11456857026842075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04638884726442403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390111608435807,0.0,0.0,0.07002436332210075,0.09590000007530614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05360624930345801,0.0,0.0,0.11613832336432582,0.0,0.04508973366588083,0.0,0.1743660780735846,0.0,0.0,0.11078080873922568,0.0,0.06025288061542284,0.3112321470845683,0.04239642687090223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04687600107714844,0.0,0.09497194708811546,0.05233576742817147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21269083669097508,0.10530050860895912,0.0,0.12233136617306628,0.0,0.05984111396353375,0.0,0.27663999254009264,0.4734324837564204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962910789312904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03744207791835232,0.0,0.0,0.0468082351530521,0.046911614587282525,0.08902902158471816,0.0,0.11573195447848175,0.045066661369517834,0.0478430161001772,0.05015873717659231,0.03538415874147817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692462583862083,0.05634055946940032,0.03896797818301535,0.0,0.040884085566282966,0.3583773845545827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290647454408563,0.0718410270714388,0.0403160061951083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036750015013807334,0.0,0.05538349766389662,0.0,0.0,0.05976008744387495,0.05076831275960733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056381978322871076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042155169898282815,0.0,0.053648301319199995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05988548712971424,0.0,0.04384988952926661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05650092354970125,0.04233334255390773,0.0,0.060722041608074276,0.1108337831368046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17608531329314855,0.0,0.05208142605155725,0.0,0.030910183509384695,0.0,0.050246674088416036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05765896054621245,0.0,0.0,0.06376373197895191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04252091029600144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11577433402073603,0.0,0.05402106551366335,0.037656327704357534,0.057957412492622026,0.0,0.17068144600500113
mentalhealth,obrr11n,2020/03/22,i want to kill my self rn i just feel like i want to suicide    ....... so i just found that my girl doesn't even like my personality and keeps up with me bcz she don't want to break my fucking heart ... i loved her really well and felt that there is something with her personality and i find her perfect i don't what to do i feel fucking useless we have been together for 9 months... i thought that helping her at the hardest time will mean something one day,1.0470967741935482,3.272687956989252,2.5015161290322574,93.69227419354841,83.40860215053762,5.440430107526883,23.27849462365592,6.742157984588678,0.5123255913978504,352,13,80,4,10,114,59,93,0.11900000000000001,0.675,0.20600000000000002,0.6204,0,0,2,0,0,1,13.0,1,0,0,1,6,9,3,0,1,0,8,4,1,0,1,20,21,4,2,3,2,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,6,0,1,7,0,0,0,3,4,1,1,4,3,20,5,9,16,0,6,0,1,0,3,12,2,2,0,5,52,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832192945614575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12117913703096528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855342547044509,0.13106984989682507,0.17615841993291415,0.0,0.16768677879305094,0.0,0.0,0.20116361283418335,0.0,0.33922712852127274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21741091792231887,0.12297499017415656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16307512919957026,0.20298058334201466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792667697540486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16558737927569986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998508553313476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14644271339263648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243229249210116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32039503169412964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753454450547793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19139753705410825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824858502866809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006846335259953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14565340295471432,0.1069818898861397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.324643218433372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496011051627935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CovidPenPals,2020/03/22,"In 3 days, pen pals from 14 counties + 19 US states. Sign up for Covid Connect! Hello,

I'm the creator of **Covid Connect: Pen Pals (covidpenpals-dot-com),** an informal service to connect pen pals via email during the COVID-19 pandemic. These days are isolating, but also a unique opportunity for human connection we otherwise wouldn't have had.

**Since our launch a few days ago, we've had sign-ups from 14 countries, and within the USA, 19 states + Washington, DC.** Many sign-ups had heard about us from Reddit -- awesome! Please feel free to DM me if any questions.

If you are hospitalized, quarantined, or simply desire more connection, try finding a pen pal through Covid Connect. The goal is to broaden human e-contact around the globe, share our experiences, and bring love to everyone who needs a little extra right now.

Next round of matches going out mid-week!

Warmly,

The Covid Connect: Pen Pals Team

**covidpenpals-dot-com**

​

(re-post from r/depression)",2.456680032076985,5.328120674418607,2.8451964715316755,85.22779069767442,95.16279069767442,5.860785886126704,25.11708099438653,7.237678284180719,1.8591108259823568,764,33,128,15,29,235,120,172,0.0,0.813,0.187,0.9885,0,1,0,0,0,0,61.0,5,1,0,3,4,5,0,0,11,0,8,1,0,1,0,18,15,7,0,5,4,0,3,0,5,1,0,1,0,2,2,5,0,0,4,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,4,4,7,6,19,10,3,17,0,0,1,1,22,7,0,4,6,58,9,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597596808969867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14412685302925485,0.0,0.19527504763357006,0.21899459925135425,0.12256001833186315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043955711960045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486930306861928,0.0,0.15522858997811118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221388859474007,0.0,0.1762958381034722,0.0,0.0,0.09112779835256864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16472351144630273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242672125411044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18063403211135406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16266121134777478,0.0,0.0,0.18272111214567804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336354677724566,0.0,0.0,0.19167264290300032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978342823809049,0.0,0.0,0.17260691161838834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018946271291055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15391221782942416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490850019438928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223617815178868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4335799340925225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14456661264572834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21899459925135425,0.0
mentalhealth,SwissTac0,2020/03/22,"Anhedonia Hey so I have had what I consider to be anhedonia phases a few times in my life. As someone with AdHD I find if my mind starts to be forced to shut down such as in quarantine I go into a chronic state of anhedonia.

Last time I got it into it I simply picked myself up to the gym and squated my ass off to get adrenal pumping through my veins and could then leverage the spike over a couple weeks and pull myself out.

Now without the gym, no sex and my life put in hold I'm slipping into anhedonia again fast and I'm trying to stabilize the decent because I feel thee is only so long before it would transition to depression.

I've tried cardio and it helps a bit but ultimately it can't compete with squatting to failure with hard acid or underground techno blasting in my ears.

Is there anything otc that I could use to increase the intensity of adrenal from running/sprinting? Was looking at yohimbine to potentially spike the mental high from it but will be two weeks before It arrives.

I don't want something that slows me down.... I WAnt something that can help me more easily get adrenal pumping through my veins when I can feel alive and restart the normal chaos I ln my mind. I'm looking for a jumper cable to let me get myself started on the right track again not an indefinite crutch",5.766632352941175,6.3463662392156905,6.220134803921571,78.8537316176471,67.0,8.727941176470589,33.19240196078431,8.660442795831766,2.652534313725491,1041,44,196,15,16,337,152,255,0.075,0.8540000000000001,0.071,-0.2262,0,1,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,8,1,0,0,14,0,17,9,4,2,0,35,34,17,0,7,6,0,3,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,11,14,0,1,3,3,0,4,5,1,0,1,3,7,27,0,39,23,4,38,0,1,2,2,4,18,1,3,15,133,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680102157008446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11504197018853013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521965787533502,0.0,0.2379158669788184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15262337811838256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232349029609936,0.1546839997707323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204079462608102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137229550882693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277729812331296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21911629847201008,0.0,0.07945051327319917,0.0,0.11180935555073286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252316879398204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874075132787744,0.1477044264634225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139541551326236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14295308534869994,0.19748714273864973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371696819687192,0.2347904826746497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408836596058797,0.0,0.28231256963811546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697251017732615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632279660690387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14053575852675165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938686073165165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184505232735192,0.21524689964883809,0.0,0.0,0.19789970763343984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16303485709599588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18982754163340995,0.0,0.13656248420399347,0.0,0.0,0.12074072071792567,0.0,0.0,0.16491314801287135,0.0,0.22427529527915932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476043294349868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930859847816753,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,althreex,2020/03/22,"Tomorrow I go inpatient. I’m really nervous and scared. I know it has to be done, but I am just terrified. After deploying and coming home I saw a huge degradation in my mental health. Unable to do simple tasks. Unable to remember critical information. Mood swings. Extreme rage. Extreme emotions. I pointed a gun at my head a couple times. Decided I needed help.


I’m just hoping that when I get out of this program in a month.. that I’ll be able to live a bearable life somehow.",1.652898550724636,4.370680956521738,4.07391304347826,79.50985507246378,87.2608695652174,7.41449275362319,26.14492753623189,8.344100000000001,2.5964318840579708,376,17,65,10,12,130,67,92,0.243,0.657,0.1,-0.9396,0,0,0,1,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,2,5,0,6,3,1,0,0,14,15,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,1,9,1,10,11,0,13,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,2,5,41,13,1,0.23432166687328196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20184736775299655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25927246752595257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397924199564384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635803363983191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224233996711454,0.0,0.1331704032290183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404816320145169,0.2490729745111664,0.0,0.0,0.1570608740164094,0.0,0.23504373729481365,0.2327342867004167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877706007256076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550832302756313,0.0,0.0,0.2069103248210538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23614112716403984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18703331893915132,0.0,0.0,0.17374654690747854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215097146513374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501124599482209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654407702883993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345968662854477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663484831873954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spiritualela3984,2020/03/22,"We still don’t know what causes depression A lot of major depression is genetic. However, many people with major depression don’t have a relative with the same illness, so for them, genetics isn’t the cause. It’s something else.",6.316428571428574,7.9851625476190495,7.289047619047621,67.73928571428571,66.3809523809524,12.266666666666667,35.42857142857143,11.855464076750405,5.2122285714285725,185,9,29,7,3,62,32,42,0.301,0.6990000000000001,0.0,-0.93,1,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,5,1,0,2,0,8,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,6,4,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,21,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5242414229396659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6593095802500526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21315433668320355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022985383055492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21692882139465008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586932810263394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689656169145718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964354616460921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037719641714263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowawayforMindShit,2020/03/22,"What are these thoughts? (Using a Throwaway) 

Hello.  I'm a young teenager, and was wondering if anyone else is dealing with stuff like this. Sometimes i get these thoughts about things i don't mean. Someone will do something generous and I will appreciate it greatly but my brain will degrade it. They might give someone something and my brain will immediately go ""Thats it?'. But i don't mean any of the things it thinks and it makes me feel bad about myself. I know that i appreciate things and I'm grateful for it, but my thoughts make it seem like others actions are not enough.  This could be normal, or it could be something else, but whatever it is I would like to know why that happens and what I can do to stop it. Thanks for reading :)",3.338181818181816,5.563379181818185,3.5531468531468526,89.18048951048954,75.36363636363637,6.078321678321679,27.78321678321679,7.010146845296331,1.3002839160839157,585,24,116,6,13,180,80,143,0.073,0.748,0.179,0.9394,0,0,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,0,2,7,0,0,3,0,20,2,2,3,0,34,41,12,0,5,7,0,1,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,24,7,0,1,11,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,4,1,14,5,8,27,1,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,5,5,83,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924622702182723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917645445168871,0.1344686692468876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10957810904759166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930096499741529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095654620364456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530044356017742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21926473940254315,0.0,0.0,0.13560376394501075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635779180246963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856635128875299,0.12589528827980842,0.07458548507551281,0.0,0.0,0.1446901745895901,0.0,0.0,0.11605318262059795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14424976209755075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19234852890195225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520454569247984,0.0,0.0,0.28591294843636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922260185206692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285852122623439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13127334818148087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947399454258223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223947806460284,0.3030998874627352,0.12979757293569447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972070513009036,0.0,0.0,0.15023592082059814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082616459884912,0.0,0.0,0.26156575498130896,0.08409190446559818,0.0,0.3125645408386664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334735110076764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842173186817545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232183204769688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322759142151488,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,psychthrowaway21,2020/03/22,"Did my therapist say something inappropriate? At the first appointment, he mentioned how his son would treat me if we were dating. Not only did he incorrectly assume my sexual orientation without asking me but I just felt kind of weirded out. Not sure if I'm being overly sensitive though :/",5.372941176470582,8.391913352941177,6.666431372549024,65.4349411764706,72.33333333333333,9.570196078431367,29.807843137254906,9.888512548439397,3.8494596078431367,235,10,34,7,5,79,44,51,0.102,0.8640000000000001,0.034,-0.5709,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,1,14,8,5,0,3,7,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,2,7,3,5,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,3,2,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.294999168966226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029800679761693,0.0,0.0,0.2684089571851748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285995684109758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23999204033641025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509401646992613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429278775171763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974046762129624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3663809946818405,0.0,0.0,0.3100289160898993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041815329435025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22415957755363614,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,krismarker,2020/03/22,"Selfharm and bdsm I actually stopped selfharm (1 year clean) but through this time I always ask my partners to hurt me when we have sex. The pain and marks like bruises (i love it) is above average.
So the question is... Should I count these kinky things as a way of selfharm ""through others""?",2.592787878787877,5.239241400000001,2.5740909090909128,92.93446969696971,80.45454545454545,5.121212121212121,29.166666666666664,6.42735559955562,1.2798484848484848,227,11,45,2,6,68,46,55,0.16,0.7020000000000001,0.138,-0.1154,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,4,3,0,0,0,7,6,6,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,1,1,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,2,5,5,0,5,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,1,5,29,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.31446271291998146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268132015102776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012537332046435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.344967828136091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574316672116285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.290836915557117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34288930347674473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3609859421017189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694096019585978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21408395025036164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18790250205694306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557815178370373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075139460061728
mentalhealth,openmindgymm,2020/03/22,"New Mental Health Podcast by College Athletes with Focus on OCD, Anxiety, and Depression After fighting their own battles with anxiety and depression, two college athletes are looking to change the way mental health is addressed in highly competitive athletic spaces: [https://youtu.be/bDYJzHPlcw4](https://youtu.be/bDYJzHPlcw4) 

Additional info on the series here: [https://www.madeofmillions.com/series/the-line-up](https://www.madeofmillions.com/series/the-line-up)",30.230204081632646,32.190305183673466,19.00989795918368,2.40831632653061,17.57142857142857,17.146938775510208,61.234693877551024,15.247664890283005,10.005073469387755,410,18,23,9,2,104,39,49,0.265,0.701,0.033,-0.9171,0,0,0,0,2,0,41.0,0,0,1,0,1,4,2,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,6,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,1,0,8,3,1,8,0,2,1,0,2,5,0,0,2,18,1,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3478365257727339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405008100323443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3916237410189784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4833140970144192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402024195785784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19091249796240656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4582204707967561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219571167374718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220829796024012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18045583762059425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CheapStress7,2020/03/22,"Why am I reacting to every kind of small problem in such an exaggerated and emotional way? Like a child whose toys are being stolen? Male 22 here, I can't really relate why I am like I am. It's like I'm still an emotional child who simply can't cope with problems. A problem like forgetting to contact someone over something important, or forgetting to buy something, or that you have to spend time with some people who annoy you (e.g. an annoying young hyperactive cousin) and so on.

I get such an emotional ourburst that I could scream and beat the table for hours, and if I surpress it I still behave extremely nervous, consantly scratching myself, moving up and down, and so on.

I am very ashamed that I am like I am, and it seems to get worse the ""older"" I get. I generally always have been an emotional person, but now it's simply getting silly. I don't feel like an adult due to this, but I can't help myself.

My parents can't bear it already the way I am, having such a ""meltdown"" two or three times a day.

I really want this to stop. But I don't know with what I'm dealing it. I will answer questions for more information if needed",5.314702907711755,5.677623327433629,6.421643489254109,77.77477876106197,67.93805309734513,9.46599241466498,30.744627054361573,9.424239791934726,2.670324652338812,896,33,173,17,14,301,124,226,0.115,0.777,0.10800000000000001,-0.6566,1,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,2,0,1,9,16,2,2,13,0,21,0,0,1,0,36,32,17,0,8,8,2,2,6,0,1,0,1,0,5,15,10,0,1,6,1,2,1,6,8,0,2,1,3,24,8,19,28,2,21,0,0,0,0,17,7,0,8,17,120,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816865003186365,0.0,0.096641758997209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273215400216107,0.0,0.0,0.07490377303341833,0.11974016564428995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5225889678575536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978569842794104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587262892355783,0.082973852212533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24272341006149736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784939609361169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437921019815485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094691286762392,0.06383013223466588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3404548293577679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12344351765274013,0.0,0.08611988080929947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12896503054339334,0.0,0.0,0.08052016468809264,0.10141313975084708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334045989561356,0.0,0.0,0.13010873171785434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14881063697473784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105733843291881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840909302391518,0.1788278479930307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18550673859357136,0.09710223456172153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13544990747784566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345657106617578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583160505606747,0.06850519894365673,0.18438063648067032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096051929566996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836145074096315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jayteer447,2020/03/22,"Not sure how to help my mom So this started back in September. My mom started saying she couldn't get the sink clean no matter how hard she scrubbed. When I would look, it would be spotless. Then it moved to the bathroom. Finally, she started seeing bugs everywhere. In her drinks, on the walls, on the pets, in food that had never entered our home before now had bugs. She called countless number of exterminators out, all of which told her they see nothing but sprayed the house regardless. 

After about a month, the ""bugs"" started to bite and sting her. She went to 2 of our local ERs multiple times. Every visit she left mad at the world bc they told her they didn't see anything. She went to the hospital for a surgery on her hand near the end of October. While there she had a drug test come back for meth. ( she has a long history of drug abuse ). At first I thought that might be what is causing it, but she said she quit ( to prove that shes not an addict) and they were still there. 

I tried talking to different mental health agencies, doctors, nurses, and even her own psychiatrist. Nothing helped. It got to the point to where she was hostile with everyone, including me her son, bc "" we weren't looking hard enough to see what she does"". She got so frustrated that she said she was suicidal. ( hx of depression). After trying everything I could think up I was at my wits end and about to abandon all hope and the bugs magically disappeared. 

Sadly they have come back with a vengeance. She refuses to try and get any help bc ""no one will listen to her"". She told me today that she cant go through all that again and that she has to she will just end it. Idk what to do. Any and all advice, questions, opinions, anything is wanted.",3.3826978898610385,5.403038191044779,3.709202264539371,89.04432835820896,74.55223880597015,7.008749356664952,25.58157488419969,7.873277556716777,1.356776634071024,1354,47,274,20,29,420,183,335,0.127,0.825,0.049,-0.9840000000000001,1,0,4,0,1,0,53.0,3,0,5,2,18,8,3,0,17,0,26,8,1,3,7,44,55,17,1,7,5,3,3,0,0,5,5,4,3,0,17,14,2,2,4,1,0,9,9,6,1,2,19,13,48,2,42,27,6,52,0,3,6,0,56,18,0,4,25,190,65,2,0.0,0.10458577626521874,0.0,0.0962275686227322,0.0,0.08625663706814958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005355259161475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452777393695935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20362305101052644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511145553704568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013376349338216,0.0,0.0,0.09067783076031123,0.0,0.1520739565462871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047658779968713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602701086498798,0.0,0.0,0.09222359220487794,0.0,0.09034831016983612,0.07724586408267686,0.0,0.0,0.08647121046077656,0.20473086177279246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23454364393615995,0.09120673304436544,0.0,0.058301647601009185,0.0,0.07437146714202009,0.08434597763943076,0.079331581749909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669571104292964,0.0,0.07508260376519135,0.10673670001339024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09223509312551892,0.0,0.05016600003098285,0.0,0.1411955166289483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814555758668156,0.0,0.0,0.0938271158160874,0.0,0.0,0.1774970027812418,0.0,0.08854222745076587,0.08767224511399373,0.0,0.10185198212178703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590585195525657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811636671315204,0.14824950621312302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895562005812267,0.09364075385114444,0.0,0.20676202889879686,0.07045644719991179,0.09381727410271112,0.0,0.0,0.06807943510205773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693953128839421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05981418530501152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344388905207273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888284762807953,0.0938862440235937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679303851812665,0.0701960215950914,0.0,0.0,0.2813597467977957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24991246324948715,0.0,0.0704927114580923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655329349127524,0.0,0.08319363741131604,0.0,0.0,0.07094825896063207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05655999257436752,0.0,0.07007669454506513,0.05147107494450855,0.0,0.08366984708880626,0.2530379329182923,0.0,0.17978905485577346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05206406256857941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365475596587384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540926292576013,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,averageeverydaymemer,2020/03/22,"I feel like my mom doesnt care about my mental health The situation I have right now is that I realize I am now having more episodes of getting sad, more than before, and more frequent so I asked my mom if I could see a therapist and she said yes, weeks later I ask again she said shes still looking perhaps a month now nothing has come up. Then I realize myself perhaps I have some mild form of bipolar because weirdly right after getting sad I'm back to being fine again (I dont want to self diagnose) so I asked if I could get it checked out by a doctor, yet nothing has come of that either. I'm feeling as if she just doesnt care, even if it was just forgetting how do you forget something important like that. I realize nothing has changed now I get just as sad as I have been and I dont even know what to do or if anybody even cares.",2.518214285714284,3.8951036136363655,3.928766233766236,89.28636363636366,75.36363636363636,6.846753246753247,27.34415584415585,7.447530270364453,1.3656360389610387,660,26,143,8,14,218,97,176,0.11599999999999999,0.792,0.092,-0.6222,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,19,10,0,0,4,1,21,4,0,1,0,29,43,16,0,8,10,2,2,2,0,0,4,2,0,1,6,6,0,0,6,0,1,2,4,4,0,0,4,6,25,6,15,36,6,21,0,3,2,0,13,4,0,7,17,104,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248121526236644,0.0,0.0,0.08905403213617984,0.0,0.07059930982561202,0.0,0.0985494217181558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3542411296603934,0.0,0.12251615127113782,0.1995274937607476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18493655655234773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175490558072329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854082252551346,0.0,0.0,0.2714669460365565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294827179907883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711835907609736,0.08273774440584898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420327238940805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310516337414515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06364849920063878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316201390364095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725482619691532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167135539130145,0.0,0.0,0.27128056879684986,0.09244185295334233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3333807740866841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19780952376577315,0.2203318019893601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228898622532312,0.0,0.12081955166010615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301801025707707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915949052236792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924894332012176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13446930486848555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831026268557376,0.0,0.09289922919431662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,speckledllama,2020/03/22,"My friend doesn’t think she deserves anything My friend, I’ll call her Sam, often tells me that she doesn’t deserve to live, or be happy, etc and that she isn’t good enough.

Sam doesn’t eat that much, since she thinks she doesn’t deserve to eat well. She gets really beat up over her grades when she compares them to mine (keep in mind, her grades are really good, but sometimes her grade is a few points lower than mine).

I thought if I encouraged her with positivity, she’d be a little bit happier, but she always dismisses what I tell her.

Even worse, Sam has scars from cutting herself. She says she doesn’t do it anymore, but I don’t believe her, especially with social distancing from the coronavirus keeping her isolated from her friends and under closer watch from her awful family.

She’s been to a therapist for a few years, but they didn’t do anything, according to her.

I just feel so helpless. I try to make her situation better, but it really doesn’t seem to be working. I don’t know what to do anymore.",6.644801279122888,6.319498130653268,6.763947007766102,78.7903152124258,65.18090452261306,10.251439013248062,32.16126084970306,9.800150414767053,2.820553768844221,804,28,159,15,11,258,112,199,0.099,0.7490000000000001,0.151,0.8374,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,2,3,6,11,1,0,5,1,21,2,0,1,0,23,31,11,0,1,8,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,7,4,2,2,6,0,0,0,10,2,1,0,3,3,39,9,20,24,6,9,0,1,1,0,36,7,0,4,2,111,46,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070964784152958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639030088326242,0.0,0.0,0.2189803750581572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14990366954268994,0.0,0.1176733896310434,0.14525796336865296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358606309599219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722901492337361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374779418825716,0.1483877824755372,0.08787937307929783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542927301573514,0.0,0.06727492201894264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083861701738157,0.0,0.06951400597846011,0.0,0.0,0.2231948561111592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416359766145712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365248749910093,0.0,0.0,0.07312171813410606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335272709258852,0.117487062075159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881302277140563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13434425775583222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780828644279373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12577683408500626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557089200180439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058080281479164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112524313753105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006171619734506,0.1495556515298538,0.0,0.13562942179481632,0.0,0.0,0.13159150357941665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325860478337545,0.0,0.0,0.15448324362350238,0.0,0.17050827526593332,0.0,0.10562816382539376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033335007026093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962943003594716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686320027041576,0.0,0.1355910184739396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08568091309701913
mentalhealth,paralleljedi,2020/03/22,Did anyone live the experience of having a friend or family member who suddenly started talking non-stop and doing nonsense and dangerous things plus having insomnia ?any suggestions for dealing with this situation? #mentalhealth,10.241047619047617,13.918326057142856,9.862857142857145,45.13047619047621,59.85714285714286,13.809523809523812,43.095238095238095,12.45797560212912,7.893095238095237,192,11,18,8,3,62,33,35,0.157,0.762,0.081,-0.4515,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,5,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,16,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22940572305523765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23587901010742385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34778720759843035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3299875013256399,0.31801822617693937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26063140461071743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978812376214188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37918917865603796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387740641348937,0.0,0.0,0.2820349782220245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711446066363363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241165934977501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,walterz0,2020/03/22,Started mirtazapine and I'm EXHAUSTED I got on mirtazapine for depression. Yesterday was my first day on it and even with coffee I only wanted to go to sleep. Today I slept in until 3 which is unlike me and I just want to go back to bed. Does this get better? Or is mirtazapine not for me?,0.37902542372881604,2.8098389999999998,3.686250000000001,81.76971398305086,91.20338983050848,7.0177966101694915,19.239406779661017,8.07648339933343,1.3706423728813557,227,7,45,6,8,82,43,59,0.121,0.81,0.069,-0.624,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,9,12,5,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,1,3,0,7,1,11,9,0,12,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,7,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23150385327020115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662714970286485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19416491366476127,0.0,0.25931070987071536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26346793885435105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988535581505053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560895536964959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15729638191249987,0.0,0.3422094577020708,0.0,0.2407927737198219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289769132334208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30128691796612506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21309853403893203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2853786726128443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3551571703216614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,piercedpickle,2020/03/22,"Need Online Psychiatry Help Hello. I'm confused trying to find an online psychiatry website that can prescribe anxiety medication. 

I was injured at work in July. I was just released to go back to work on March 8th. I was not able to complete a full shift without having anxiety attacks or panic attacks, crying episodes, and other related issues. 

I have never had anxiety before. I have been treated for depression in the past. I was never like this prior to my injury. 

How can I find psychiatric help online? I went to my local rapid care and they turned me away and told me to put myself on a voluntary 5150 at my local ER. I'm not a threat to myself or others. I am not suicidal. I am not going on a 5150 hold. 

Can any of you guys help? 

TLDR: I need mental health help. Low income. Need anxiety medication. County health services are booked months out. Need help now. Can't go to E.R.",1.6819776714513566,4.3934406666666685,3.8647554492291327,81.1983133971292,86.77777777777777,6.1500265816055295,22.392610313662942,7.520522993642371,1.477991812865498,698,25,121,13,22,238,104,171,0.156,0.696,0.14800000000000002,0.3244,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,1,2,4,10,3,2,6,0,16,5,0,1,2,23,29,6,1,4,8,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,2,1,0,5,8,7,1,0,8,0,20,3,21,21,1,26,0,2,0,0,10,13,0,3,9,83,24,4,0.1158993739543318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881554864782596,0.0,0.3546508153781085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637045392998609,0.10889127700418462,0.08911946452947549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09862183084288877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816713603480193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121518288513251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12731002007349956,0.0,0.0,0.09982396095784968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211859856200128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197604855361103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475860188840432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24639122962878654,0.0,0.0,0.3884245365381875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12096883480563747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05662257981057967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335128520528736,0.11679930912228892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250977454582196,0.0,0.0,0.3437516689260083,0.1787774843266909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598294342026832,0.0,0.0,0.11063906672692712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651088244598926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12677510387645027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107468185719198,0.0,0.07868806708027724,0.12606523751927667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743988080180583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172286061317144,0.0,0.1687522491872705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Witty-Tennis,2020/03/22,Suicide tendencies/What is wrong with me? I'm 21 years old female and I always wondered what is wrong with me and if I have any mental illness.,-0.014827586206898504,2.2118378620689683,1.7271724137931024,93.01006896551723,101.41379310344827,3.6993103448275866,19.593103448275865,5.6839178017228535,0.07027724137931067,114,4,22,1,5,37,21,29,0.39,0.61,0.0,-0.9246,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,6,5,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,13,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25272272998385154,0.0,0.0,0.206542760607116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060823930937248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31870728542150817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322248005643769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32937576261463986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6641491111070642,0.0,0.1955883221341538
mentalhealth,momisignedup,2020/03/22,"How to cope with shame and guilt from having traveled last week - reaching a breaking point I went home as soon as the government mandated it. Canceled a very, very long trip. I'm now being shamed and judged by everyone at home for having gone at all. My mental health has reached a breaking point. I don't know how much more shame I can bear. I can't eat or sleep. All I can think about is how much everyone hates me. Please help.",1.8591731266149871,4.2120345813953515,2.2692248062015534,95.81285529715765,81.09302325581395,5.682687338501292,21.183462532299746,6.937597516519254,0.35513074935400546,338,10,73,4,9,103,63,86,0.166,0.742,0.092,-0.8225,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,1,4,4,0,9,3,1,3,2,11,15,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,3,1,0,2,1,0,4,2,5,0,0,2,0,7,0,10,12,5,15,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,5,44,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983170347097027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3703894260882479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913482345397831,0.0,0.20601202660309054,0.0,0.0,0.12990742580433026,0.0,0.3888164643755692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651345525384093,0.15798183001303467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17151663330449934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19531589995614315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28494676567563204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127462741523677,0.3664280744802241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939509647986019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418626101372042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.319828739803225,0.0,0.0,0.1554634911455359,0.0,0.0,0.1796647357563943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheSouthernPansy,2020/03/22,"Realized I've been doing friendships wrong all my life. What do the healthy ones feel like? None  of the friendships I've had have been very healthy; most of them have  been mired with codependency issues, or most likely the other friend  ended up using me as an emotional punching bag and I never realized it  until it filled me with resentment.

So if a healthy friendship does *not*  involve, as I so belatedly realized, solving all your friends problems  or being their guidance counselor, what does it involve? What do you do  or talk about in a normal friendship? How do you bond if not over your  issues? Can you tell me about your healthy friendships?",5.2658474576271175,7.652836432203393,4.712,82.29698305084747,70.27118644067797,7.092881355932204,32.13898305084746,7.908726449838941,2.4451633898305083,521,24,88,7,10,157,73,118,0.061,0.6659999999999999,0.273,0.9804,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,6,2,0,5,7,1,0,6,0,13,1,0,2,3,23,15,12,0,4,7,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,4,1,14,4,12,10,5,7,0,0,0,0,14,3,0,7,5,70,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.381568158997426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452345537589861,0.19309423549521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110233596347436,0.15574806873114885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3368716066540641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4550965108354279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539885725000592,0.21301964714877505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814456687074905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21360581779107776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773081277423664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086083788600968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523007139065766,0.1905524060342456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882926753422816,0.0,0.17988302354165292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23836228413918945,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,murdered800times,2020/03/22,"I've developed a compulsion to try and sallow something with nothing in my mouth I can't see a therapist at all due to the self isolation and local shutdown so I can't find a way to ask for a professionals opinion.

But i can't stop instinctively trying to swallow even with nothing in my mouth and it's really starting to cause me pain.",5.91,5.978171764705883,7.351764705882353,72.63294117647061,66.64705882352942,10.917647058823533,36.117647058823536,10.686352973137794,3.986370588235294,272,13,51,7,4,94,47,68,0.099,0.87,0.031,-0.6264,0,1,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,3,4,2,1,1,11,6,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,6,0,11,6,1,8,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,1,3,33,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354578842177124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25873265592733496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663531207382058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301981978270159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4833386378634828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679999648757048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16134987219816188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20070218362540124,0.0,0.262748013978852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19389642438024146,0.0,0.0,0.1782699112443467,0.0,0.0,0.21056872620402012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924323282932493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34199685692716364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19991710765287726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Neglectedsince1994,2020/03/22,"If you are suffering from Depression and looking for some counselling then hmu I have got a lot of free time now because of the COVID-19 lockdown, So I want to help some of you with your depression.

To those who have already spoken about it, I hope you have already found some help, To those, who feel that speaking about it publicly might ruin your image and people will judge you then I can assure that if you won't talk about this, It ~~can~~ will do more damage and people in this country are not wise enough yet to understand these issues and they will keep treating you the same and you will do some irreparable damage to yourself...

One of the reasons why people are not able to understand these issue is that our  Parents never came across these issues, YES, they had their fair share  of problems but most of that was not mental, The amount of pressure we  go through today is way more than what they have experienced, They will  judge you based on their experiences, Talk to the right people who  understand these things. Your feelings and emotions are valid.

If  you have any mental issues feel free to drop a comment or text me, I  can assure you that whatever it is, you can get over it if you chose to.  I had my fair share of depression in life and I can say that I've done  catastrophic damage to myself mentally and physically to cope with that  stress. It lasted for a period of 7-8 years as far as I can remember. So  I can say that ""I  know how it feels"", That's why I want to help you  before it's too late.

*”I know what it's like to be afraid of your own mind.”*

If  you have any fucking issues such as your Career, Parents, Relationship,   Social Anxiety, Sexual Abuse or anything else feel free to text me  today, tomorrow, after a week or 6 months or whenever you feel ready.",9.25642581888247,6.826771598265892,8.514092485549135,75.10499229287095,61.34104046242774,11.65441233140655,35.494412331406544,9.888512548439397,3.1690588053949886,1407,43,275,21,15,443,172,346,0.125,0.754,0.121,-0.6954,2,1,0,0,1,0,41.0,2,20,6,0,10,24,1,3,9,1,34,2,0,2,3,57,56,26,0,9,13,2,6,1,0,7,1,3,0,0,32,12,0,1,14,0,3,2,5,13,0,1,7,11,44,14,43,41,12,27,0,8,1,1,47,7,1,17,17,205,76,1,0.08637684488513876,0.10234243674268904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906379924541288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174784330202316,0.0,0.06607804991330997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108078355631066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05265452292109192,0.0,0.07350033304201646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879209949456204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223188749791018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839350171749323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215677026688272,0.09716232449030213,0.0,0.08925037075241883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449312871471687,0.0,0.0,0.2620483686463396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470775205037653,0.0,0.07985400123837542,0.04512833637968462,0.0,0.04908995150339586,0.0,0.06908345352959369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368973514228522,0.0,0.0,0.08579169673048911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.450774923256261,0.0,0.07677570851020013,0.0,0.0,0.09494090999845216,0.07040865714530195,0.0974368433409778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061010520009156424,0.04219936334791592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253479513923697,0.0,0.0,0.07343450465614121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26114263078045513,0.091632182403522,0.08721599006339635,0.0,0.06894517350414871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661914773899752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05853118554448604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19182252846905806,0.0,0.0,0.23953131353724397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265097510736863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888097825851234,0.0,0.09273640577483992,0.0978481270952717,0.0737653535768463,0.0,0.1373806679307158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805031566782663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894438397903088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885287204388516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057384937627751084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050367032876710634,0.0,0.16375029834347254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697640253054265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189460212027426,0.06856191895863567,0.06928629479589266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588333490011594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055623856129927776
mentalhealth,krippy9000,2020/03/22,"Trying to not spiral during quarantine I don’t have covid 19 and if I did I probably would display very few symptoms. Despite being privileged enough to have a strong, young immune system and access to resources if I were to get sick, I’m still experiencing crippling symptoms from the pandemic and resulting quarantines: panic attacks, depression, suicidal thoughts, hopelessness, paranoia, irritability, poor sleep, not eating.... please check in on your friends with mental illnesses during this stressful time :(",16.492222222222225,13.591487111111116,13.732592592592592,44.69666666666669,48.25925925925925,16.725925925925928,55.39506172839506,14.554592549557764,8.210758024691357,420,23,49,12,3,129,67,81,0.39299999999999996,0.529,0.078,-0.9867,0,2,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,1,0,1,1,8,1,2,2,0,7,7,1,1,0,11,10,5,1,3,4,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,2,0,3,5,0,0,3,1,5,3,8,5,2,6,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,2,3,33,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490503856983114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885534169756232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22400736818695766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262004118146689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16913520267576093,0.0,0.11437541589505287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061746121954373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568526472629236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24030579639420774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360302104060897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190757099885704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748278863798004,0.0,0.2507693829630276,0.0,0.0,0.2394603339115906,0.0,0.0,0.4550784383329404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17379612925061086,0.1276526190596933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14863068727014506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180629955411406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551278931009535,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nanana789,2020/03/22,"Constant need to hurt myself Hi, so I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I feel like I’m crazy. I want to stab myself because there’s this itch in my stomach. When I take the train I want to step in front of it. I don’t know why. I don’t want to die perse, I was suicidal for a long time, but not anymore. I just feel empty and I want to hurt myself. But I’m too scared to actually do anything that would really hurt. I punched myself, cut myself and I’m still not satisfied. 

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. Am I truly going crazy? I’m not sad, I’m not crying, just some sort of empty. I talk to a therapist and she knows about me having this. But since everything is in lockdown we don’t have frequent sessions. I don’t understand I thought I was doing better but still I get these episodes where I just need to hurt myself. 

Does anyone know what this is and why? Am I crazy?",0.016031746031746508,2.0667399153439163,2.092486772486776,96.09047619047622,86.35449735449734,5.0814814814814815,17.994708994708997,6.42735559955562,-0.23787195767195746,680,17,159,7,21,227,94,189,0.26,0.635,0.105,-0.9863,0,1,0,0,0,8,23.0,1,0,0,1,11,11,1,1,3,0,17,2,2,0,0,36,40,10,2,7,11,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,7,0,0,9,0,0,3,10,9,0,0,3,2,32,2,17,36,1,14,0,5,0,0,4,4,0,2,8,101,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.12096066262186266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292849064468304,0.08667111704881135,0.0,0.1020031075272003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07556085758478859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962673173281093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394961751659554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615701731644442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864408576661815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847247781040187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114013461202372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253491524573329,0.08855235182014469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476054874400655,0.0,0.07044558812072042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5307788219099214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3406078044859488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605573824850543,0.0,0.0,0.10969488082691872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18381978854254294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07940773827285544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409900260146713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253555432923524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19797873116543424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355849288519038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09319754965122977,0.09962906800494573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391948051320871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840517397708252,0.07227823911478286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12903988721696652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924437671197526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22369737326992967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805295695426155,0.2710472241191315,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BowlOfPoodleNoodles,2020/03/22,"After 4 years, 7 months and now 3 days, I am anorexic free! I hope anyone that has any eating disorder knows that it’s possible to pull through! I believe in you!!",2.0536363636363646,3.9597834545454593,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727274,78.0909090909091,6.824242424242425,26.15151515151515,7.793537801064563,1.5257151515151524,126,5,26,2,3,42,30,33,0.08199999999999999,0.696,0.223,0.6876,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,4,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,5,15,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23177609730129065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23831627070971706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3839987119666029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198071630770791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39062072454595065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487541929624749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3385211078806993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873112623989862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720472657274883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842346305025694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21948335467537067
mentalhealth,SilverWareContainer,2020/03/22,"I feel emotionally numb I have been feeling nothing but sadness, I havent smiled in days and I upset the people around me without even meaning to. I genuinely cant remember the last time I ever even felt happy. I cant cry, I feel like shit everyday.",2.2216000000000022,4.524677960000002,4.3580000000000005,81.62900000000002,79.4,7.2,28.0,8.238735603445708,2.2598,198,9,37,4,5,68,36,50,0.278,0.507,0.215,-0.5719,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,1,2,0,5,2,1,0,1,11,10,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,4,9,2,4,8,0,7,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,6,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086280967889962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574309992817235,0.151141369916684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636209409307643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3095821858275209,0.2119900148724552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35549498159039483,0.16742523350688426,0.2250202057505091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494781977597202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19103285706352874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144953656760977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25528430944828545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22487259532713386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624741652392559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654816614205556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24056487704707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665589690759686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259125215254617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MoonRaccoon2,2020/03/22,"I don't know how to help my mum and this is a long story. Any help would be appreciated! My (f22) relationship with my mum (f52) has been generally good growing up but as an adult I realise she made some questionable decisions during our childhood which has seriously affected my sister (f20) with depression and PTSD however I seem to have dealt with it all differently. My mum is one to bury her head in the sand when a situation is getting bad (like in regards to money, health etc) and is very stubborn when confronted so this is why I am struggling to help her in her current situation. My relationship with her is very much love/hate because she has made selfish decisions in the past claiming it to have been for us (like cheating on my dad during their divorce when I was six, or moving us an hour away from dad with the new partner that emotionally abused us for years) when I can now see she was just doing what she wanted. Just like she is now. Considering we only saw my dad every other weekend for a long time I'm closer to him and care more about him than I ever will with my mum but I feel I need to help her now, my dad says she will never change but I want a better life for her. She is still my mum after all.


I'll give you a bit of back story.

Her living situation;
She lives in a very nice one bedroom house that she moved into about three years ago. My sister and I moved out around age 17/18 so she downsized from a 3 bed to the 1 bed. The house is literally a third of the size of what she lived in before but she wouldn't let any of her belongings go. She still has a ridiculous amount of kitchen utensils (like 20 plates, glasses, mugs) a draw filled to the brim with cutlery. She has over 100 different trays, pans and baking equipment it's absolutely ridiculous for one person. The same applies for towels, bed sheets and she has a crazy amount of clothes (not even nice, she buys most of her belongings from charity shops or they are older than me). She also still buys everything in bulk to like loo roll, cleaning products and food. She buys enough for a family of 5 and she doesn't even have anywhere to put it. We argued on saturday because we stopped over to visit and found 7 blocks of cheese and 4 packs of coleslaw in her fridge freezer which was filled to the brim and frozen at the back in the fridge. She also has piles of animal food everywhere because she doesn't want to run out. I went mad, told her to give a bunch to the food bank but she refused. I just can't get over how selfish she was being, especially with the current UK situation.

Her pets;
She lives alongside 6 cats and 2 dogs in this one tiny house. I can't even describe the smell apart from urine and rotting food. They are not well looked after, the most recent dog she rehomed from the rescue has some serious anxiety problems that she doesn't have the time to deal with (she can't even take it on walks because it just won't move and is petrified of loud noises). I want to call the RSPCA about them but they are well fed and watered and they are able to go out and my mum loves them all to bits (I also believe the situation isn't ""bad enough"" for them to be taken off her and I would hate for half of them to go back into a rehoming centre as that's where they came from). But the state that the animals are in is simply unfair, the anxiety dog has long claws ""because she won't let me do them"" and some of the cats are big maincoones, their hair is matted, they shit and piss everywhere because there is one tray in her bathroom for them all to share. I just know they deserve better than what my mum is doing.

Her job;
She has a well paid job as a catering manager however the company have convinced her to run her canteen in a factory between her and one other woman. They work days 6-6 mon-fri then 6-12 every other saturday and she is in a perpetual state of being exhausted, it would kill off someone of my age nevermind 52. She is completely committed to her work that it is literally killing her. I think she struggles with the office side of the role because she brings it all home to work on while doing the physical jobs at work like cooking, serving and cleaning. Even with it being just her and this other woman she still on occasion goes in early for them and does so much extra, she is almost obsessed. I think sometimes she doesn't want to be at home. She earns a good wage with them but she is always in her overdraft. She paid off a bunch of debt when she downsized house but it must have crept up again. It's crazy to be earning £2,500 per month but you can't lend your kid £20 because you're in your overdraft. God knows what's happening with her money. I don't think she even knows herself, she never checks on it all just keeps ignoring it. (Just an example of her ignoring a situation; when we lived with her in the 3 bed house the appliances would give you electric shocks and you could feel electric when you had a shower as a buzzing feeling. She never got it fixed and it eventually stopped on it's own.) But this is where her sticking her head in the sand is causing so many problems.

Her health;
So she is a type 2 diabetic (injecting daily) and has a reduced immune system. So that makes her category A with the coronovirus situation at the moment but she is refusing to stay at home and won't stop going to work even though she will get paid. I am literally lost on how to convince her to stop. I said to her you will end up in hospital (she hates hospitals) and there is a good chance it would kill you but she is so worried about not getting paid her full wage she is putting that before her own health. I honestly think I'm going to be arranging her funeral in the coming months if I don't contact her work somehow to force her to be at home. Her mental health is just delusional is the only way to describe it, she is friendly and talkative and seems normal but it's very obvious in what she says that she doesn't want to get old and constantly makes jokes about dying and us being left with all her animals. So tbh I don't think she cares about catching this virus.

It's a horrible situation but I don't even know where to begin with helping her. Since visiting at the weekend my sister had a PTSD attack and hasn't stopped crying since she got home so I don't want to put on her to help. My dad has helped my mum enough even lending her money on occasion since they have been devourced and even with us being moved out, as in the money helping only her, which he had no obligation to do. If anyone can suggest anything it would mean a lot. Thank you for reading.

TLDR: Mum has got herself in a dire living situation but I don't know where to start to help. She is low key suicidal and has an awful quality of life.",4.798461383748993,5.403889763274336,5.430607401448111,83.57309131134355,69.1401179941003,8.612013944757308,28.609680879592386,8.677179120904656,1.9524988200589968,5333,179,1097,83,88,1725,480,1356,0.149,0.768,0.083,-0.9985,14,0,0,0,2,0,117.0,10,10,19,11,71,59,15,3,71,1,123,25,6,9,14,186,198,88,6,22,32,17,6,6,2,15,9,4,16,6,49,69,9,12,21,6,17,26,29,33,3,10,28,14,189,26,176,141,31,163,0,3,3,1,197,69,2,15,69,776,238,18,0.0352942244388324,0.041817884605726566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031286200433379686,0.0,0.03534206753533328,0.0,0.0,0.0846743355968466,0.029367622094478806,0.0,0.0,0.04800256581786505,0.0,0.053999970182332636,0.0,0.0,0.02467854235922462,0.0,0.029044139450341608,0.031419342560674614,0.0,0.04015227553884612,0.033160085675105734,0.08141724003301168,0.058938406331370735,0.17212025303011766,0.0,0.06006557090996925,0.03976450475216802,0.0,0.06242974672284165,0.0770643039264374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03603934928290625,0.04036719026935008,0.07196962810428469,0.036256890740250285,0.037336609609132265,0.030402849189846332,0.037005322823395366,0.03814051811543573,0.0,0.02817956629722692,0.0,0.0387690482569549,0.022761854944709455,0.036386795632241724,0.030398863792032663,0.0,0.036629832728096265,0.07374990509166833,0.0,0.0,0.03088621365000358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03970125202094984,0.0312602069719837,0.10940510575862117,0.03936238985618557,0.2331150237409043,0.031925646637406706,0.05947381263426866,0.0,0.031720173140893204,0.0,0.033272253695395965,0.0,0.053537461047185514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17071166515175154,0.03869829537543554,0.02726823025033276,0.0,0.09219887776948382,0.10157230837891727,0.10029260552154913,0.08880936280846816,0.08468404641748954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0312105661102933,0.0,0.0,0.06969147929498448,0.07244411331647832,0.15006444058455176,0.0,0.0,0.2129127720392536,0.0,0.1770149241365569,0.0,0.03475770159213862,0.20362398154565667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050722153021091,0.031371128352890236,0.11714349020151485,0.0,0.11638069636723483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03834727812229837,0.07218147149114426,0.049858708990736085,0.1034578516840525,0.0,0.18699268079793605,0.09370283395168276,0.029638259451051342,0.0,0.038527815228728536,0.030005887484485506,0.06370883106913873,0.06679249708533762,0.04711833775412983,0.035782803933401934,0.0,0.038445757270331365,0.0,0.0,0.03556827694416166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634302644106717,0.18756087503247384,0.0518906319361085,0.026170220209900213,0.0816632451214406,0.034087381895257444,0.0,0.0,0.034580846276659416,0.0,0.0,0.03703535142095889,0.0,0.14349767940876426,0.08052854431318948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03369233085160398,0.0,0.03081755541828926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754361239767186,0.0825141192986129,0.10644133167368508,0.03953760883421238,0.0,0.03530377555721142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03484878870638468,0.07578557710507362,0.0,0.0,0.033572889737401274,0.056134767760400335,0.0,0.0,0.02812492731910703,0.06426107274149429,0.0,0.0,0.03622901419482785,0.08758724152876185,0.3570496833535464,0.0,0.0,0.029904681832935338,0.0,0.03490689044098733,0.0,0.024981433716181816,0.03761894720580655,0.11274405291303947,0.14753776000809504,0.0,0.07379437316233586,0.0,0.03860615305165325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026536864357575008,0.0,0.0,0.032494179934676314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307556951041314,0.03467639631258753,0.0,0.041160692197835184,0.0,0.0,0.03372514395206446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21227303168339756,0.0,0.0,0.11648572588895913,0.14572213611092805,0.028014912548622886,0.0,0.0,0.09520123930939917,0.03271809965250125,0.031847547890609264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541676944619257,0.03584299814005832,0.0,0.1504320264034622,0.0,0.0,0.04545664674401104
mentalhealth,ZentraliTee,2020/03/22,"Is corona deteriorating my mental health? I work in a mental health clinic in Switzerland and I'm confronted with the subject every day. Mental health and Covid-19.  The last few days I've started feeling panic coming up while driving, I was able to suppress it though, because obviously a panic attack could kill me while driving. However, I'm scared that my mental health is deteriorating because I'm stressed out at work and with the constant reminders of Covid. I've never had problems with panic before, but my mind is spinning around that subject all the time now. Does anyone else experience this kind of stress right now? How do you cope with it? I don't want to get a panic disorder because of this whole thing.",5.901136363636361,7.837988659090911,6.095878787878789,74.8688181818182,67.71212121212122,7.40121212121212,31.381818181818186,7.908726449838941,2.3877218181818183,581,24,94,7,10,185,83,132,0.218,0.7609999999999999,0.021,-0.9765,1,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,1,0,2,5,12,3,7,7,0,8,5,0,1,3,21,16,8,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,7,10,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,11,0,0,2,1,8,1,15,13,3,21,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,11,59,15,2,0.10387653261009204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263288685066059,0.10643378321973508,0.0,0.09247213712679443,0.0,0.11817455194712673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18996651039598306,0.0,0.08839127838304793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948043498680883,0.0,0.11225362893722596,0.0,0.08293695877877118,0.0,0.0,0.13398354008475366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190515058119037,0.0,0.09090305369869192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677551385019801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752045888211744,0.0,0.0,0.1016111812365244,0.0,0.0,0.052523096028243295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054271200942997734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4416635867154953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492399274435135,0.10817142376190238,0.0,0.0846732382933461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4187324513990335,0.0,0.10488568606539347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011598573400935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4875069182747334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939581287569844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870999127728714,0.0,0.0,0.10399853055033187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352434443100231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379804342853836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901095256192638,0.0,0.1020581658794522,0.0,0.060571241517891714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061269070281589386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597443901432575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15124670580735874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sy-lphid,2020/03/22,"It’s getting bad and I don’t know if it’s real This whole situation is taking an enormous toll on my mental health. This situation is giving me way too much time to think and distractions barely work anymore. I haven’t been clinically diagnosed with anything except for a lot of anxiety and panic attacks. Up until now, when I’m asked about mental health at the doctor in order to see if I should go to therapy or not, I’ve always lied just the right amount so I won’t have to go, for the economic and personal implications of it. I suspect that I’ve suffered from other mental illnesses since I was 13 (4 years ago), mostly BPD, but because I’m not diagnosed I don’t like to think/say things about it, I feel like I’m taking away credit from those who do have it and have to survive it every day. 
Lately, because of the lockdown, not getting into my dream school, and the lack of support I get from friends (among other stuff) I’ve been feeling really bad. I feel like it would be okay if I left now because there doesn’t seem to be anything in the future for me. Maybe the lockdown won’t ever end and I’ll just be stuck home for years and I feel like I can’t breathe in here anymore. My mom knows about the anxiety part and tries to help me, but when we call the rest of my family they’re not understanding of it, and I feel like I can’t trust anybody. I haven’t texted my friends about this, I avoided telling them about the college rejection, and I’m thinking of uninstalling social media so they’ll get used to not having me around in case something happens, and I don’t think they care that I stopped talking to them, which really isn’t a bad thing. The few times I’ve tried to tell them about it, they either didn’t take it seriously or they said something about themselves that made me feel like my problems aren’t important. Because of this, the fact that I’ve only ever speculated about BPD, and the way I’m not always this bad, I think I might be faking it. I think about committing suic*de a lot right now because it feels like the only escape, but I know I won’t do it because I don’t want to hurt my family. Am I really sick, or is it some attention seeking act? I can’t stop asking myself this, and I don’t know who I should talk to, if there’s anyone that cares and won’t judge me (which is why I’m on Reddit haha). 
I hope you all are safe and the quarantine is over quickly. I feel like nobody is thinking of mentally ill people at the moment, but I hope everybody gets through this.",5.043598888959028,5.1642441369863015,5.848494413231489,82.49134650590243,68.49119373776908,8.78532920901458,29.204027523514927,8.558390810932622,1.9867000946909918,1978,65,407,28,31,650,226,511,0.17300000000000001,0.716,0.111,-0.9840000000000001,1,4,2,0,0,0,49.0,1,1,7,2,26,34,1,3,20,2,44,10,1,2,5,88,95,32,0,12,21,1,8,8,2,9,9,1,1,1,36,20,0,4,22,1,1,3,24,14,0,0,7,10,55,20,56,75,13,45,0,3,1,0,26,18,0,15,29,271,91,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054886644826979525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304161074112828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09473432833035786,0.0,0.12281220128379415,0.04329456343548742,0.0,0.10190661341000412,0.055120221437469696,0.11577009891670785,0.07044075841642866,0.05817407737821392,0.0,0.20679605258341005,0.22646813286844505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559673164719279,0.0,0.0632252857964783,0.0,0.12625922487778934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039932041304081664,0.0,0.0,0.12569110215038332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337578184157558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05484104344797847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201690224994212,0.05216865559489104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674171653160885,0.0,0.2504611463397776,0.3096400370328448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956755149604874,0.0,0.16174821446776422,0.059397467435324,0.07037894716241175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05475395647970605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163205402750006,0.0,0.0,0.041502385986897816,0.0,0.06210888593420918,0.12299725516638706,0.0,0.0,0.06628458867805584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361142368997885,0.0,0.06984629480325,0.0,0.0672741785587489,0.0,0.0,0.242000382758165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528108023767188,0.0,0.058588387433564273,0.0,0.0,0.062205036923112286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495954582786589,0.06568530143391803,0.0,0.07251771069087756,0.0,0.0,0.045516915532606936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09418298480749174,0.0,0.07264752963034839,0.0,0.06705125022454891,0.0,0.04292620267208505,0.0540644819520732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0592472433956358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047633426684607,0.11899892878915667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575540946383608,0.05889827621464967,0.04923974496472987,0.0,0.0626644058397211,0.04934069574333685,0.05636789745807558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05121927826082892,0.1391970395491966,0.0,0.06311768828688867,0.0,0.09533513097119688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353258011468522,0.0,0.0,0.07088139148404175,0.0,0.0702639070446079,0.0,0.0,0.13966407828116806,0.099534819709994,0.10823826772084172,0.0,0.07080872434532516,0.0,0.08227124634544415,0.27772225297089104,0.0,0.0,0.0722098644834118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407662815625208,0.0,0.0,0.06445890826210042,0.0,0.053477343655027584,0.0,0.0,0.03652088970928027,0.09829538477766836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05587143933966235,0.06912932866243532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045077102005106666,0.0,0.0,0.04398482978350862,0.0,0.0,0.07974643102401459
mentalhealth,james_buchanan_barne,2020/03/22,"The impending Coronavirus recession might be my breaking point I need to provide context to my situation, so I’m going to start with that, and then I will get to the title.

I am a 17 year old girl. The last four years of my life have been very difficult for me, and as a result, I have developed a lot of mental health issues, including anxiety, an eating disorder, and PTSD. 

Starting my freshman year of high school, and older student began following me around school and harassing me (touching me in the hallway, following me to the bathroom, etc). Eventually, I began to see him outside of school (at my birthday party, which no one from school knew about, or following me at the mall). This behavior of his continued until he graduated my junior year of high school.

That same year, my uncle passed away from brain cancer. Things got tense with my family as a result of that, to the point where, on my birthday, a family member that worked with law enforcement had to intervene.

In the meantime, I had turned to two things as a coping mechanism: a male friend that I had made online, and exercise. The male friend was over thirty, and at the time, I was fifteen. We engaged in sexually explicit talk, he repeatedly tried to pressure me into sending lewd photos of myself, and when I wanted to stop talking to him, he threatened murder and rape. He sent multiple threatening emails and texts after I cut him off. As the behavior with him and the creepy guy from school increased, I turned to exercise for relief.

I began running and lifting weights because I thought it was what I had to do to protect myself. I had no faith in the adults in my life, and was scared that if anything ever happened I would be on my own. However, that developed into multiple disordered eating patterns and the exercise became excessive.


Later in my sophomore year, I acquired a boyfriend. He wanted me to cut off all of my friendships and was all around very controlling. After we broke up that summer, he still would message me dozens of times in the middle of the night, yell at me for hanging out with other guys, and showed up at my work and demand that my boss let me speak to him.

Things were shitty at home, as usual. I was addicted to the back and forth of my eating disorder. I decided that the correct option would be suicide. I wrote out letters and everything. I almost did it too- but something held me back. I thought it would get better. It did not.

One week later, I began hanging out with another guy. He was sweet, friendly, and very understanding of my home situation. He enabled my disordered eating habits, by saying that he did it too. He gave me a place to stay when things got bad at home. He became my best friend, and stayed that way until second semester of my junior year of high school. The only bad thing though, was that he would always try to touch me when I didn’t want him to. No meant nothing. He would constantly try to push boundaries. In November, he knowingly made out with me despite having mono (he didn’t tell me about this. I also didn’t want to make out with him). That December he raped me. Later I found out he had a girlfriend the whole time. I stopped talking to him after that. His brother has since tried to reach out to me a few times, and he himself has once.

When law enforcement found out, via welfare check, there was never an investigation. 

The summer between my junior and senior year, I took my ACT test. My mother put an obscene amount of pressure on me to get the highest score in my class, because that score would be the tie-breaker for class valedictorian. My grandmother died of ovarian cancer a week after I took my test.

My senior year of high school, I found out that I had the highest ACT score. The school, however, informed me that I could not be valedictorian because I took the ACT test separate from my classmates, so it didn’t count (this I did because I entirely stopped eating and sleeping after I got raped and wanted to wait until I was in a better state of mind). 

The two things that have got me through all of this were college and boxing. I was accepted into the honors program at my dream school in the Twin Cities, and I’ve been jacked to be able to finally go and get away from all of this. I started boxing after my rape, and it has helped me immensely through my eating disorder (because you can’t spar if you don’t eat) and self esteem. 

Now, because of this coronavirus recession, my parents have said I might not even be able to go to college if my dad loses his job. I for sure have to quit boxing (the gym isn’t even open right now. I’m absolutely devastated. My mom says we can’t afford for me to box it for me to go to the gym anymore. I don’t know what to do. I was already struggling with what was going on at school, because the appeal process required me to read the police report, evoked a bunch of comments from my classmates about how “I’m jealous of the girl who got it” and “at least [the guy who raped me] was hot”, etc. It brought out a bunch of bad memories. I’m dealing with it weird too; I know he’s bad, but sometimes I wish we could be friends again because he had a way of making me forget. I feel gross. And I hate myself for having those feelings. And I can’t see my therapist my mom says, because of the coronavirus. And I’ve only had six therapy appointments since the rape happened. I don’t want to live at home anymore either. All we do is yell and fight. I’m “not allowed to cry” and “don’t have any right to be upset about anything” (my mom). If I express any emotion, my mother loses her shit. I only eat once a day, maybe. I’m not doing well at all. And now the future that was helping me get through this is gone. I can’t take it. I can’t I can’t. I do good for a while and then I break down and I’m shaking and crying. I can’t do it. I don’t know what to do. I’m sorry",4.114738023570226,5.440511562012143,5.04125871129024,83.07948614866591,71.28100607111881,7.923714096219581,28.2221213203408,8.38687165950837,1.9669563777358288,4593,169,894,72,85,1499,424,1153,0.151,0.785,0.064,-0.9987,7,0,1,0,1,1,151.0,5,2,0,13,32,47,14,6,59,0,92,28,3,10,11,156,170,67,3,21,13,8,6,0,6,10,10,7,4,10,55,71,9,8,17,9,1,26,26,30,1,8,64,16,148,17,167,84,20,163,1,3,2,6,89,62,1,10,68,631,203,33,0.07518428450197262,0.0,0.0,0.04098098386217592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03764310029066517,0.0,0.04148386376179775,0.030062422576446837,0.03127967379654873,0.0,0.0,0.051127891640313165,0.03941863886942314,0.028757885927786418,0.0,0.07456260760605228,0.0,0.0,0.061870260028915075,0.0669299532007182,0.0,0.0,0.0706381102049062,0.05781207393309747,0.12555147421897098,0.20624238898696534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03945063404154005,0.06649438985592138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04196526321998083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04062375092011549,0.04216278405921769,0.060028533373915276,0.0,0.08258640614339649,0.024243821831551233,0.03875584799533987,0.0,0.0,0.03901470862267747,0.0,0.21541925925049615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077291712908826,0.0,0.04228610026834116,0.0,0.0,0.08385035128775649,0.049658510833678095,0.03400424485677745,0.0,0.0,0.03378539349986126,0.0,0.07087705219849325,0.0,0.0380154332791834,0.0,0.0,0.041180354346558916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365353094628175,0.14521797925885638,0.0,0.09820171383843547,0.0,0.10682240376246828,0.0315305053730186,0.15032935132831554,0.0,0.0,0.14888852422664747,0.06648521448518177,0.0,0.0,0.03711445774760015,0.0,0.03995868932497625,0.0,0.0,0.050394441084972666,0.1588726489599852,0.15083193501467146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03923642976485313,0.0373044006213973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082638633046759,0.030642613290943463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03844051239719455,0.05310488360719129,0.0,0.0,0.03319455032759384,0.0,0.0,0.0841119829625344,0.0,0.03195949503406016,0.0,0.07114118787571423,0.05018609372060378,0.0,0.037766359618456334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037884037622775285,0.0797586445826335,0.037957347358353176,0.13208238799266506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027874097150801462,0.02899337758601954,0.0,0.0,0.035277678940995844,0.0,0.0360706743555045,0.0,0.0394466296134318,0.08006880924500022,0.05094681696311321,0.08577155444604577,0.0,0.0,0.04174162523962119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03927578757266003,0.0,0.0710734505627395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04394320260194569,0.03779048598160155,0.0,0.039983870592177485,0.03760231521856015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420696816473337,0.03575873579464377,0.08968434106827734,0.037636292395476,0.4184978039735779,0.059912140605943236,0.0,0.03921680290936559,0.0,0.03858779380703757,0.06219321707299024,0.08451028587825211,0.0376192908465397,0.0,0.0,0.02894026769071094,0.03717958991481386,0.0420813255359625,0.07982373531282727,0.08013644369173778,0.030021133361387432,0.09428614255958423,0.0,0.03929946920987887,0.0,0.041119702170996614,0.0,0.035430149186825154,0.0,0.028264612572914488,0.09064541992890854,0.032857189268102924,0.0,0.04298989085168598,0.043647374567505975,0.1498472935357852,0.0,0.03693408889586275,0.059687923728492215,0.08768112181820027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12529875970542334,0.10209038790157766,0.08177891182736455,0.0734441212546104,0.0391347458413786,0.0,0.0,0.04140243371160784,0.09305236297406537,0.1330369168707168,0.059677785497281366,0.06030829798135165,0.04577710187961505,0.03379985051842773,0.0,0.0,0.0419702843304312,0.04322910835984263,0.0,0.0,0.05473505455794276,0.0,0.0,0.18693065498693776,0.0,0.0,0.21787296392553973
mentalhealth,eeeee2ee,2020/03/22,"Ahhh this self-isolating thing is really messing with me. So usually i don't go outside much unless i have to because of anxiety, but now that I'm forced to stay inside it's really messing with me. I can't find anything to occupy me for long enough and i just can't keep my mind off of how trapped i feel, and I've just been listening to music trying to block out some of the bad thoughts swirling around but it's not helping as much as i wanted it to. I just feel like I'm spiralling and I'm really close to just snapping and doing something I'd regret. Anyone else feel this way?",4.069836065573772,4.573562991803282,5.446024590163933,83.17920081967216,70.72131147540983,8.722950819672132,28.364754098360656,8.841846274778883,2.07152131147541,463,16,96,8,8,156,77,122,0.19899999999999998,0.775,0.026000000000000002,-0.9695,0,1,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,1,0,29,18,11,0,2,8,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,9,0,2,5,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,2,4,11,1,19,16,4,10,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,4,63,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981526529470232,0.0,0.0,0.13693423748753916,0.20065881421007994,0.16115769850676226,0.17433702741756835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351625659730773,0.11938081300429562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16359722622753206,0.0,0.0,0.2023526419055363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29706419847665244,0.1399064554272537,0.0,0.0,0.17899206309778504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129904888891004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13126584790484566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17406950044280145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567638305806164,0.0,0.0,0.1733101565295517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977401982417754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879264104616598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3763758375773466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20430137829428746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15076538980197884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20873687658402534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301058319048512,0.0,0.0,0.15547321786324236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329609084089166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21568750240982326,0.0,0.11551011923607142,0.15544681011890596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,milliexe,2020/03/22,"Advice on getting a diagnosis Hi everyone! I'm currently a 16 year old English girl showing symptoms of something similar to PTSD. I've had this ongoing for 3.5 years after my parents went through a very traumatic divorce. I get a lot of flashbacks, nightmares and whenever anyone mentions anything about divorce I feel very uncomfortable and often get upset. I'm usually very lively and outgoing but I get very nervous about the subject and I become very tearful when talking about it.

My mum and step-dad are supportive but they don't believe in getting a diagnosis for me. They believe in making your own happiness and tell me that ""Oh, everyone suffers from anxiety"" and ""some people have it worse than you."" To me this can often be quite hurtful and upsetting. They say that I'll have to get the diagnosis myself but phoning the GP terrifies me. Before I go off to college I'd like to know what's officially wrong with me, but with the current COVID-19 situation I can't make a doctor's appointment or anything like that so I can see someone and start making myself better. 
Please can someone let me know what the best option would be: I'd love to be better in time for college and to end this small bad patch I'm going through.",5.9243401287553645,7.226215583690988,6.700533798283264,72.96050026824038,66.98283261802575,9.430150214592274,36.88009656652361,9.673873057562805,3.882768454935622,993,52,165,21,16,328,138,233,0.161,0.6890000000000001,0.15,-0.4733,3,0,1,0,2,0,22.0,0,2,3,4,7,15,0,3,11,0,14,3,0,3,0,29,36,17,0,1,5,2,1,2,0,1,2,1,0,1,10,12,0,0,3,1,0,3,2,7,0,0,2,3,22,8,27,29,4,20,0,2,1,1,17,6,0,6,13,107,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10538454726320864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250086475162795,0.0,0.0,0.07540748924753432,0.0,0.17749392175805434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004578100696398,0.0,0.1191059468780822,0.09176785700326158,0.24300798814495694,0.11317631037274202,0.19075966425420945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11038357263710076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551835302113937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20610037602048645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05452949718411128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33806628201142386,0.0,0.12258120374190587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480263902496154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544993207901738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11853720237589906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110278464913166,0.0,0.10537490052259996,0.0,0.0952288048552922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09168566785320284,0.09733401032949016,0.0,0.21596143093687187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316482243574286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974872516897145,0.0,0.0,0.07476590383584937,0.0,0.0,0.11838104441273545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606462880199487,0.0,0.0,0.11470606386906065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576239703887889,0.0,0.0,0.0859382261533976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212219090594981,0.0,0.0,0.18275284990039886,0.08302408308533936,0.0,0.0,0.07633300082801807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238083478659224,0.0,0.11209188797758987,0.0,0.08668144740875756,0.09426098061357237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288508472562086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877564966377625,0.4449156677592211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997307425345288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990291535356396,0.07660974763948936,0.11791119887624517,0.0,0.13889684206963335
mentalhealth,theyfoundmybody,2020/03/22,"I’m stuck I’ve struggled with my mental health since I was 13 (2016) but I’ve never had the courage to open up to anyone about it. The one time I told a friend I was struggling she acted like I didn’t say anything by the next day. My family don’t have a clue and I’m terrified they’ll treat me weirdly or differently if I tell them that sometimes I want to die, or that I don’t want to get out of bed for the day, or the reason that I don’t know what I’m doing with my life is the fact I didn’t think I’d live to see today. I don’t want their pity or their ignorance because I know that’s what I’ll get.
I know I need help or at least a diagnosis so I know what’s wrong with me but I don’t even know where to start.",0.7870250231696012,1.6469202048192777,2.967108433734939,96.53326691380913,78.87951807228916,6.312511584800742,19.39573679332716,6.67199483983844,-0.2131171455050973,558,11,148,5,13,191,92,166,0.20600000000000002,0.68,0.113,-0.9558,1,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,4,0,4,10,0,2,9,0,14,2,0,1,2,28,33,10,1,5,8,0,0,1,1,1,2,1,1,0,8,6,0,1,7,0,0,1,8,6,0,1,7,2,25,4,16,25,1,13,0,1,1,0,10,5,0,6,8,86,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115462679901394,0.0,0.13127863532263234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09724729479338327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20576579723852165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16556574040909358,0.16667367460071195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536728844121088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15038958433277388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325157924019345,0.0,0.16669445996223053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957168763836875,0.0,0.0,0.10692881281556203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4383643678819265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11267993128946208,0.07793772880133754,0.0,0.14086688063435876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607675402464738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828860693643535,0.1230384692454051,0.0,0.1696607217735483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810086464520588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16402220794089142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12686372957163966,0.0,0.0,0.12712382418192686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196389767637395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15777809317726438,0.0,0.1129153277985853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335483435411821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394352299679395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221963352735457,0.0,0.0,0.0930225443571056,0.0,0.1512146787406683,0.15243663464900067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822827136358561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17441973363830476,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elflippydippy,2020/03/22,"A question about my sense of reality slipping. I was curious if anyone else has had similar experience with the sensation that your grasp over your reality may be slipping. Over the past few months I've noticed vague sensations such as emotional responses of sadness, or disturbing out of sequence recollections, that don't reflect my current state of mind. I'll be at work and suddenly my mind goes into a Misty fog of some vague experience that brings about sadness, or melancholy. I'll sometimes wake in the morning not sure if I'm where I'm supposed to be. Or perhaps I'm living in the past, or some distant future. My dreams seem to be flowing into my waking life, mingling with what is the world around me, making everything seem a bit surreal. These experiences seem to be happening more and more, and it's a bit frightening to be honest. 

Does anyone know what this could be?",7.189573170731705,7.88639881097561,7.4986829268292725,70.51095121951224,63.9390243902439,10.950243902439025,37.74146341463414,10.793553405168565,4.366165365853659,711,35,120,18,10,232,103,164,0.11800000000000001,0.823,0.059000000000000004,-0.8427,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,0,1,5,5,0,1,9,0,14,3,2,1,1,32,24,10,0,3,7,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,8,1,0,2,2,3,0,0,2,0,9,2,23,13,7,20,0,2,0,0,3,11,0,13,6,80,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20863870595621054,0.1528660622194958,0.0,0.13281357704264354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3257606631012787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191186286669605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055997299238908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463177290209745,0.16782226692971938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408522635756756,0.4378187268143319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319310523009542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199267989878634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053795679365369,0.0,0.0,0.13174032720771378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958761819004552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.301285199623234,0.0,0.11908458728242888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16985744480446602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848435781661792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671305262624127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4074596525490818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475558877131274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061282351550375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861442504918144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beetleclown6362,2020/03/22,"Confession time. Since a young age I've been fairly bright in everyone's regards, e.g. in sixth grade I placed first in a school wide spelling bee, placed third in an academic decathlon, could easily do ninth grade math and my reading level was much higher. I've known I have a brilliant mind but now I'm 26 almost 27 years old and I've nothing to show for it. My life started off as a shit show, being raised by a meth addict and no father in sight, molested by a immediate family member and simply no guidance in my early development. I've been through a few serious relationships and they end up in flames because I'm convinced that there is something wrong with me mentally. I've been through therapy a few times but never stick with it because I get to a point where I think I can handle everything on my own. Now with the virus and everything I'm stuck at home with family and it's killing me even further because I can't get a job and have been out of work since October. I've no money to contribute to the household and I'm afraid they're going to kick me out soon. Nowhere to go either because I distance myself from relationships the moment they become inconvenient. This is just the tip of the iceberg. I need a life coach or something. My last therapist told me I have several conditions such as depression anxiety and PTSD. But seeing how I'm so bright, I tend to have a high level of introspective tendencies. Idk where to end this confession so I'll just stop here.",5.48009618874773,6.327557437931037,6.190907441016339,77.8622050816697,67.72413793103448,9.82940108892922,31.47005444646098,9.93914555978268,3.0547931034482767,1187,47,224,27,19,389,168,290,0.158,0.7959999999999999,0.046,-0.9871,1,0,3,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,2,14,10,3,1,18,0,16,4,1,1,1,34,32,19,1,2,7,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,6,16,0,1,4,4,1,2,5,7,0,2,7,4,22,3,36,23,5,43,2,1,4,0,8,23,1,2,18,137,28,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176577000070772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103350450771733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924649587626103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947240904930513,0.13349104278626614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650458794045112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410486070528002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21410928478777733,0.0,0.0,0.07983327021984116,0.0,0.0,0.11549613950753596,0.2172597126637044,0.0,0.22789031590172626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028116707132652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262988168642134,0.0,0.1373860259912342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277054315769243,0.12124212369293785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994448666299795,0.0,0.13372437002240106,0.0,0.0,0.09852490483620864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707476302382748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12180818803396395,0.0,0.1220439001337382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885310725056401,0.08962332106281634,0.09322213286512053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159776982632323,0.0,0.12683237528964933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525661369820024,0.0,0.11426089685282335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14129016391152693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090236865093736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259537560415688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232654844287318,0.09631746965717697,0.0,0.0,0.13654831117227414,0.1240709686403043,0.19996926291482653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18610273824161225,0.0,0.0,0.08555216718076539,0.0,0.0,0.10105244761442277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13822498965299407,0.14033899082898604,0.0,0.07744839737159558,0.0,0.0,0.1409601410468379,0.0,0.0,0.11549613950753596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799455174274988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321519983404394,0.0,0.07783609791782223
mentalhealth,grrrlfieri,2020/03/22,"No will to live Before I say this please let me make it clear that I don’t have any plans to kill myself. 

Does anyone else feel more fatigued/defeated than panicked in regards to this pandemic?

I had virtually no will to live before things got “bad” a week or two ago. I never had an actual plant to commit suicide but I basically moved through the motions of being alive without much joy or motivation for practically anything. 

Now, with the reality setting in that life will be much, much worse for at least the next few years, and probably the next decade, my will to live has dropped even lower than I even thought possible. A lot of people around me are saying to “stay strong” and “we’ll make it through” but I don’t even want to make it through. 

Suffering through an unprecedented global catastrophe, for what? Just to return to the “normal” that I had no interest in being a part of in the first place? Why would anyone even care to fight for that?",5.040428751576293,6.355769032786888,5.375409836065575,81.59610340479196,69.05464480874318,8.690878520386716,28.83102143757881,9.057496981413335,2.2637435056746535,755,27,146,14,13,240,114,183,0.195,0.684,0.121,-0.9496,1,0,0,0,1,3,15.0,1,0,0,4,7,8,2,0,11,0,18,1,0,4,3,23,26,6,2,3,6,0,1,0,0,6,1,2,0,0,11,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,7,4,0,2,5,3,13,4,32,11,8,22,0,1,0,0,4,8,0,3,9,110,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.12018678122168065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917426073160096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375329320581411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17223322619433848,0.12619238099192456,0.10135051265904196,0.1096388647141334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283378695389596,0.0,0.0,0.2096008530496096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557023279551935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777849324393546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288470796858584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3253851222558773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062273597201631226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047601706414018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985026202747846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625873138012526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259398501480726,0.08699183057857224,0.0,0.0,0.32625866045648155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470656514171116,0.0,0.0,0.2466315637542559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090001080473496,0.2716111880979346,0.0,0.09498889064590807,0.0,0.26196495854170043,0.0,0.12067103948165805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333707078920671,0.0,0.08538391183343279,0.0,0.12867640135070965,0.13519313136478267,0.0,0.13884484225513852,0.0,0.0,0.13278773845780162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958841817379416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13127259602649666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13471748440914724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818222950915032,0.0,0.0,0.09777559794656256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120309811813767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264319303611592,0.0,0.09879184142991612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111331017799763,0.0,0.0,0.11872222757134045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255109662739935,0.08748961227557911,0.0,0.0,0.07931125759713811
mentalhealth,rainbowballena,2020/03/22,Teletherapy My therapist transitioned to teletherapy but I have a problem finding a place I could actually sit down for an hour uninterrupted and also have access to wifi. Libraries and cafes are closed so any other idea?,7.461754385964912,10.024749736842107,7.67105263157895,62.62570175438599,64.78947368421053,11.382456140350875,36.35087719298246,11.20814326018867,5.132603508771932,182,9,26,6,3,59,32,38,0.09699999999999999,0.903,0.0,-0.5499,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,8,4,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.3230219593621802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647118128436345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251009021073352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642877807226913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025408410469435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3259821574227651,0.0,0.0,0.3736745665534145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3458392251250548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167357374185532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3843328200928793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThruuLottleDats,2020/03/22,"Music During the height of my depression I listened a lot of metal, I was a metalhead, but listenin to some bands kinda drove me deeper in my depression because they worked on the things I was struggling with, primarily bands like Devildriver, Lamb of God and Dark Tranquility were the culprits. 

I pretty much stopped listening to them and moved to more mellow music like liquid drum n bass for a long time but now that things are picking up again, mentally, I am starting to crave the power that is in metal, the raw energy that just calls for headbanging and such but everytime I listen to any band from that time, its great for a while but then it kinda becomes meh. 

Which is annoying cuz that leaves me without music thats loud and powerful. Doesnt help either that I accidentally wiped my hdd with 100+gb of music on it. 

So, do I just have to accept that metal no longer is a genre for me or is it the issue of having that emotional trigger from those bands that put me back in the hayday of my depression? 

Anyone with similar music tied to bad mental moment experiences?",7.698609625668451,7.3914106078431425,7.838805704099822,71.89371657754012,63.01960784313725,10.947593582887702,32.27094474153298,10.436869588844218,3.2929078431372565,860,28,151,18,11,280,125,204,0.155,0.7,0.14400000000000002,-0.3673,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,3,7,11,1,1,12,0,13,0,0,3,0,25,18,13,0,0,9,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,18,7,0,1,1,5,0,3,3,6,0,0,4,4,18,5,29,14,5,21,0,3,0,0,11,7,0,5,13,115,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533606800605894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859057912169453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041447782802015,0.14161168106296956,0.10338860470513407,0.18731353288720465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.173183944189934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.438237251932889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19078089785399766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16590458331712715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869882500712559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368152485131768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17702179325172487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17958541846832596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571922235528733,0.0,0.0,0.1500935938857611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441906706663912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418404944481879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802614795225832,0.12467794901982107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17254754164670033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17049817316227264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004609707367288,0.0,0.0,0.14179596304347775,0.0,0.1773062063767449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253538083068552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977941101114715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16349154031889904,0.0,0.12347323099536214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowAway47930479,2020/03/22,"My house just burned down. Why am I laughing so much? Yesterday, at about 11am a fire started that destroyed a part of mine and my family's house, leaving it in a state that cannot be lived in for likely many weeks. Thankfully, nobody was hurt. I'm not asking for sympathy. In all honesty, while I'm shaken, I'm not doing nearly as badly as you would expect.

While I wouldn't say I'm in a good mood exactly, I'm just laughing at all of the details of the whole situation. Random thoughts that appear into my head that I can't help but laugh at. I'm sure it's normal, for those in situations like mine, to not have the appropriate emotional responses. I'm just wondering why. Especially since my family's freaking out and I'm just there laughing like an asshole. The thought that I'm going insane is equally as funny to me as everything else.

This 'happiness' isn't consistent but it has been going on pretty much since a couple of hours after the fire. If I was to guess, maybe it's a form of denial. My brain can't cope with the grief so it's just doing other stuff. I honestly have no idea but it's interesting in a fucked up sort of way.

Idk. I'm not worried about it. I'm just interested as to why I would react this way, especially since I am normally prone to depressive episodes and panic attacks. I don't need reassuring or sympathy, I'm just wondering why anyone would react to trauma in this manner. 
Thanks for answers

(Also, if there's a better or more appropriate sub for this, please let me know.)",3.473787128712871,5.064565887788781,5.222858910891091,80.1037933168317,73.29042904290431,8.482343234323432,26.15635313531353,9.075114841892004,2.136758085808581,1196,41,233,26,24,408,156,303,0.183,0.6459999999999999,0.171,-0.5093,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,0,1,14,28,3,1,15,0,22,3,2,2,4,49,49,20,1,10,18,0,2,3,0,4,0,1,0,0,19,6,0,0,7,0,0,3,11,10,0,0,5,3,18,17,42,38,9,29,0,3,0,1,5,16,1,10,10,154,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133370516434801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111472232936422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508074207483946,0.1157044806080224,0.0,0.0,0.08491969136143017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995008778603793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135367696065961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253499866241076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759864039905511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496174171257803,0.1144047923293418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140618081565056,0.0,0.19175744242737267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402492659853136,0.0,0.0,0.11560295076645713,0.08530559442342488,0.0,0.0,0.11203987290286363,0.0,0.0,0.10826720102214947,0.0,0.0,0.1043789971041916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817093004903994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015925015149477,0.2347085609261069,0.10887764524014748,0.11481292314455087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589458233379218,0.0,0.0,0.10769124548816177,0.0,0.1040005772565192,0.0,0.14906424148170602,0.0,0.08980765813340949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311322803628956,0.10217666093034196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495302205420668,0.07541320376362146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929923291922735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932927572476218,0.0,0.11013694707098122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164189640151803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034708709890662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088015013601561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523950673522907,0.2286420749191971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198754676252705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642825504448565,0.0,0.0,0.0958560575270409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18727318248690175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614853220182184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614578930940825,0.0815818704315254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3670929169388699,0.1135503541910031,0.0,0.0,0.2205901553974544,0.0,0.1032866861858794,0.0,0.21674561713177948,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw__away-account,2020/03/22,"I cut myself for the first time and I don't really know how to deal with it I don't know how it happened but I dropped a glass cup and when I was picking up the pieces I just thought to myself ""I wonder how this cuts"" and then proceeded to start doing so on my wrist.

At a certain point it started bleeding and for some reason my only response was simply the thought ""it's only bleeding a little bit"" as I continue to cut a number of times more.

(ending with no serious injury but a wrist full of lite glass cuts.)

I don't know what happened and it's only in hindsight that I truly realized what I did to myself.

At this point the scariest part for me is the fact I've never done something like this before and I only realized it was wrong after I finished.



1# Is this the normal emotions that people feel when self harming or am I going through something even more serious?

2# any other advice?",3.814780219780221,4.862164763736266,5.106263736263736,83.38873626373626,71.69230769230771,7.138461538461539,27.736263736263727,7.321109707123232,1.548107692307692,705,25,136,7,13,235,103,182,0.161,0.7959999999999999,0.044000000000000004,-0.9655,0,0,2,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,1,8,10,4,0,11,0,12,4,2,5,3,31,24,17,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,15,8,0,0,10,0,0,1,5,8,0,1,7,1,20,2,20,17,7,25,0,0,0,0,2,9,0,3,15,105,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14480188486629314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076894538808502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609209802860574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16177653217953214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15276929303425532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15164179021178634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16668497729547516,0.13124540471991636,0.0,0.0,0.09787291448386204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492534890670015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604366359981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421533238015756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26207397694802986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24431110788858204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239431496138138,0.14851744610359932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428721149448265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518704784024564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4507968186460404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16046683139873213,0.0,0.10273084698199028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801600624834836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949292816002214,0.15235593293463154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15458630285287267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22815572173075035,0.0,0.0,0.2097681810937791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352801546693223,0.17281241006812098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069722384610166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162013922226009,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BoyMeetsWorldBoy2,2020/03/22,How can you not try to think about suicide all the time? Text.,-0.7892307692307696,1.3575258461538446,-0.34730769230769104,109.12980769230772,98.23076923076924,2.6,14.192307692307693,3.1291,-1.8089692307692309,48,1,12,0,2,14,13,13,0.273,0.727,0.0,-0.6705,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,4,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7048923253311054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129191583719367,0.0,0.0,0.3757672513595272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4375197722896925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DishFishWasherbliss,2020/03/22,"Lost Memories When I was a child I was pressured into doing sexual activities with a kid that was a couple years older than me. My mind had blocked it out for several years. Then one day I just suddenly remembered. Far as I was concerned this was the only time something like that happened. I had a dream last night that makes me question if it really is the only one. Bare with me for a second as I tell you about my dream. It was one of my typical nightmares that aren't really scary. Not sure if that makes sense. And at one point my sister, who I recently opened up to, said if you want to get over this why don't you talk to _______. Then I wake up. Now five-ish years ago one of my family friends brought up a time we went to this really fancy mall. Go carts and swimming pool fancy. I told her no and at first I just thought she got me confused with someone else. Turns out everyone else in the family remembered it too. They were all surprised I had no recollection of the summer trip. ________ is actually the oldest boy in the family and has a past of messing with his sisters. So now I'm almost wondering has my mind blocked off another memory where something happened. Or was that day just not exciting enough to remember? So I was just wondering do you guys have a way to access repressed memories? Sorry for the long post.",2.9438582807832714,4.919263744274812,4.390776634583474,83.87206272817792,75.6793893129771,8.373315632260207,25.51344175240624,9.085049710711278,2.124091735811484,1039,37,207,25,23,345,147,262,0.091,0.8490000000000001,0.06,-0.7406,0,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,1,4,1,2,12,10,0,3,15,0,21,1,1,2,2,43,39,15,0,4,10,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,14,13,0,3,8,5,0,5,6,5,0,7,19,1,31,5,33,20,2,46,0,1,0,0,22,16,0,9,24,148,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.1007776259437778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915435349783128,0.0,0.10341101670418396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828867683868663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142674278282162,0.0,0.13320253884707345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172539384275025,0.0,0.0,0.10670657762940162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867989248482034,0.0,0.0,0.2920642018954248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784228334755541,0.0,0.0,0.07978693977344596,0.0,0.0539548495831213,0.0,0.05869130488490109,0.0,0.08259527478504021,0.0,0.0,0.10225455360328847,0.1826444573539375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417967092034148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050453007679788026,0.0,0.0,0.09139160970439687,0.0,0.0,0.11273252591152315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786842571375768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20854859729471095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691286366114817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34989560499245004,0.15708454016938667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858388123487176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09762450125807072,0.0,0.09890509772252877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568718563255025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984741941201183,0.0,0.10196768107676983,0.0,0.35095782846930745,0.0,0.09823439610518504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11666686629456224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750120658524799,0.15900616487371594,0.0,0.11560346051020565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973317213805336,0.0,0.0,0.08300534017341689,0.0902634300049648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08198566045390013,0.12043633339138125,0.0,0.0,0.09867989248482034,0.0,0.0,0.11232922304126383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06091192775728255,0.08197173486343334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095733277242804,0.0931860396568629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22398604843910733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19950946776366013
mentalhealth,No-Closer-To-Heaven,2020/03/22,"What are you doing for your mental health while on lockdown? Where I am now isn’t on lockdown yet but I fear it’s coming, due to covid-19. At the minute it’s “make sure you are practising social distancing” but there’s probably about half the population not taking these precautions seriously. My mental health hasn’t been too bad over the past while because I’ve kept myself busy socially but if a full lockdown comes into place I’m going to have a lot more time on my own. What are you guys doing/going to do for your mental health if/when your country goes into lockdown?",3.089659090909091,5.547687803571431,3.868409090909093,85.46295454545455,77.21428571428572,6.572727272727272,22.68181818181818,7.686295010490155,1.147132142857143,462,14,86,7,11,147,75,112,0.105,0.868,0.027000000000000003,-0.8594,0,4,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,6,0,0,6,4,0,1,5,0,10,3,0,1,1,13,17,6,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,4,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,3,0,1,2,0,11,1,13,15,4,20,0,0,0,0,9,10,0,2,7,61,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13695496303017718,0.09998880338717954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825879657075972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845749926439842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864396536842628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624116519373935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5230563021211789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944914587682214,0.0,0.0,0.10948871214601387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4958992640432467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15658149629084495,0.0,0.0,0.17137238948268665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17684790524638033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33440795635668963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15459268167803344,0.0,0.12332723272478707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564495257230204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaylovemygfasd,2020/03/22,"Gf self-harmed for the first time in years; how to support? Hi everyone.

My (25m) girlfriend (23f) had been under a lot of stress lately (work, school, finances) right before corona hit and we weren’t going to be able to see each other anymore. After a few days my state went on lockdown but I convinced her to temporarily move into my apartment (no roommates) because I’m afraid with everything going on. 

I saw her yesterday for the first time in a week and she admitted she self-harmed for the first time in a while (afaik a year if not YEARS) and she didn’t think she was gonna see me soon enough to have to explain it. She also said she didn’t really want to talk about it. We did talk a little bit about it later, but I didn’t want to push her.

My gf is already in therapy, has been for over a year, and has seen significant improvements in her mental health! I’m obviously a little worried about this new development bc I’ve never seen her do it before and she hasn’t done it in a long time. Is there anything else I can/should do to support her now? I don’t believe she’s a danger to herself. I’ve been trying to just give her a little extra TLC but I’m afraid that’s the best I got.

Thanks in advance.",2.3450209523809527,3.9632206640000014,3.826457142857144,88.83246666666666,76.36,6.521904761904763,22.704761904761906,7.2636822038024595,0.7254761904761904,946,27,202,11,21,313,139,250,0.037000000000000005,0.8390000000000001,0.124,0.9634,1,1,0,0,0,0,32.0,2,0,0,6,10,9,1,3,15,0,21,1,0,1,2,25,45,12,0,3,6,0,0,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,8,10,0,0,3,0,1,6,9,4,0,3,17,6,29,5,33,25,7,47,0,0,5,0,28,17,0,2,23,134,37,3,0.11121368065631328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272706210760136,0.08893754024045761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029408720360873,0.0,0.0,0.0915193831604302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779482748002481,0.0,0.18926930192778735,0.12529973397285862,0.1167118965099629,0.0,0.12141653518593948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172362354507619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381020787660115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290475956054213,0.0,0.0,0.11491346140873952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626943782468824,0.09995168507436868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28379489985817496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668629638592113,0.12641059527451862,0.0,0.08894773998392902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821494195149646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545387590728185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343959746995676,0.0,0.09842060769040227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945498942551416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120772323647117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820254215037965,0.0,0.0,0.08577484662808456,0.1074108657941761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07124633161748226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497587561926428,0.10578967798076604,0.0,0.0,0.11255418223922907,0.17724580919861496,0.0,0.2320402474540716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739489544000268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25240793373408443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17877868762438962,0.0,0.10239061511910716,0.12718253619887088,0.0,0.0,0.07126123595296018,0.0,0.0,0.2593983661896997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550678890790878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119342059640318,0.0,0.08920890631668978,0.0,0.0,0.10309619617059032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096488406633992,0.11294289114701253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2864718562356673
mentalhealth,Blonde_Ducky,2020/03/22,"I hate myself. I’ve never had any sort of self confidence and have always hated myself. But, recently, it’s been so bad. I’ve been with the same guy for 10 years and he tells me he loves me everyday. He tells me I’m beautiful or sexy more times a day than I can count. But, I feel like I’m like this disgusting swamp creature or something. Like how could he love me; how could anyone love me? Sometimes I feel like he’d be happier without me. I feel like he things he has some sort of obligation to be with me, because we have two kids. I wish there was a way that I could just disappear. Then, he could be with someone beautiful and bubbly and sweet. Someone who his family would love. Someone who would probably make a better mom than I would. I’m just a garbage broken person who can’t even talk to people.",2.1392727272727257,4.066689836363641,3.432121212121213,90.04818181818185,77.9090909090909,7.066666666666667,22.51515151515152,8.021203637495839,1.0722606060606066,633,19,135,11,15,206,97,165,0.10800000000000001,0.615,0.27699999999999997,0.9857,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,1,7,15,3,0,5,0,20,4,0,3,1,34,34,12,0,8,7,1,3,5,0,3,0,0,0,4,7,8,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,4,4,20,11,11,19,3,9,0,0,0,4,25,0,0,5,12,83,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646871173012574,0.0,0.0,0.07884100505809431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106571179351008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968023919662694,0.07067400204833219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253668513942817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3702644291814454,0.0,0.0,0.07476964992398659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657516823417099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929490443682204,0.0,0.17586340085378416,0.2484758363243389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479566744338188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22892719078599955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28320434088429075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4185499826509597,0.0,0.07738871958006446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578378827058935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941761357936577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037598483676388,0.10123154882305027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249994878849454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11447361114376085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094737558478524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2946986434763062,0.08925381893067902,0.11466446757293892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318561463326278,0.2026677605644681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702326361450189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760368506294394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325341510379094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202524174764128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332160750270214,0.11175894566269423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470745459643897,0.0,0.0,0.07465950319128117
mentalhealth,persimongalaxy,2020/03/22,"Intrusive thoughts Im on a cocktail of different meds for schizoaffective and ocd. The thing that gives me the most distress is constant repetitive intrusive thoughts (memories of being bullied) that make me have thoughts of hurting myself and enter my mind hundreds of times a day. Ive been told the intrusive thoughts/obsessive thinking is from the ocd. I take 300 mg zoloft and 1000 mg epilim to address the thoughts, and nothing really helps me. Im at my wits end. Does anyone have psychological techniques to help with very intrusive and distressing thoughts? Or med recommendations? Thanks.",6.7246078431372585,9.661959892156863,5.835882352941179,73.40813725490199,67.72549019607844,9.63137254901961,38.784313725490186,9.994966539143718,4.674149019607842,487,28,74,13,9,147,69,102,0.131,0.8170000000000001,0.052000000000000005,-0.8185,1,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,7,0,7,1,0,1,0,16,18,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,6,1,0,6,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,7,0,8,1,11,10,1,8,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,2,5,42,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929151896565788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16890929368099564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008032672745518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16330460352389273,0.0,0.0,0.1367828438070192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384391125463656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994121486853318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20953479814923706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673268605984042,0.0,0.3376706790175949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043342558350264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34723742198356833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15782266745656326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997807907906865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013246198938658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175212932760962,0.0,0.0,0.14390389152286046,0.0,0.0,0.1038415538441633,0.10015340914233943,0.0,0.6204403095426976,0.09114222603787224,0.0,0.0,0.14935534506878398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289673204246492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KingOfGifFulThinking,2020/03/22,"I can't learn I have never been a good learner. Years of failing or barely passing and getting punished rather than helped has left a bad taste in my mouth.

I'm now in my second year of University and I hate it. I only pass through sheer luck and haven't learnt anything. As I'm spending days upon days attempting to teach myself new material, I'm quickly forced to jump ahead to the next topic before I can even grasp what was even happening. I try to read textbooks but I completely lose focus no matter how much I force myself to read. I can't concentrate on lectures as for some uncontrollable reason, even if I try really hard, I cannot physically make myself concentrate on what's being said and tend to go in and out of some strange dissasociation from my surroundings. And then I'm left all alone to figure this shit out even though I can't make myself learn or memorise anything.

I've attributed myself as a more visual learner for most of my life, but University is not something that supports that. Rather than showing you a chart, it'll make you read war and peace on the history of charts before even getting to work relevant to what you're trying to do.

Leaving to TAFE (vocational school) isn't an option because even though a similar, lower level of my degree is done there, nobody is looking for people with that qualification.

Last year this got so bad that I broke up with my girlfriend and planned to give in to my compulsion to throw myself down the steep escalator on the way to uni or jump in front of a train and I'm terrified that I'll feel that way again.

All I can do while I try to get this work done is let anger and sadness well up into me until I cry :(",8.717841365461847,6.682902009036144,8.680554216867472,72.24918473895585,62.0421686746988,11.624417670682735,35.98875502008032,10.203070172399654,3.412259598393576,1345,46,259,23,15,440,181,332,0.218,0.753,0.03,-0.9968,1,1,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,7,17,16,5,1,11,0,23,4,2,6,3,44,44,26,1,3,9,0,2,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,14,15,1,0,6,4,1,7,9,12,1,1,6,5,32,4,53,35,7,45,0,4,1,0,6,20,1,9,16,178,46,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056843032438447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16794305245316565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040091483755362,0.06220360034317785,0.0,0.17365973853709166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698865570800584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120878846506934,0.13161675543689508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088479298163559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4043850091686484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05159528909569761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993754256521422,0.09788758212326712,0.05799258173432322,0.08558763637425977,0.08161197358337458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023503261847084,0.0,0.09140921309852806,0.1007449349875524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839632044964868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08317750739721967,0.0,0.1080473000842362,0.2217369515161703,0.1043444295665071,0.07207498601907987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08568922777207474,0.11415842732853305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043406420031166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501230270545409,0.0,0.07870075752789267,0.09855239428619013,0.10852237847396606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760722012261229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074278366967572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062075831341153,0.0,0.06537044937767811,0.10491573973176496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706491032059847,0.0,0.0,0.10327152718288247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474421598290623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785565939518963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11579557627806035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005106694508434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771181398349674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619917138763388,0.0,0.0,0.09174763555014276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857497179348214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971342967880051
mentalhealth,Forsaken_Yellow,2020/03/22,"Covid free places on the internet I'm experiencing huge amounts of anxiety at the moment due to the C word. Can anyone recommend safe spaces on the internet- blogs and websites- that are a refuge from the relentless virus talk?

Thank you x",3.843863636363636,6.8954356590909125,4.469272727272728,78.69390909090913,78.77272727272728,8.974545454545455,26.981818181818184,9.3871,3.0663600000000004,195,8,34,6,5,62,39,44,0.034,0.6679999999999999,0.298,0.9001,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,6,4,1,8,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,2,17,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3999047329787159,0.0,0.0,0.3655211608134757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.546165784968129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4201691847057129,0.0,0.481280871313909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zzzdogteeth,2020/03/22,"I think I'm starting to hate my two best friends They are dating for a while now. Everything was cool until I started to feel like a third wheel. Nowadays I don't even really talk to them, they seem to be really happy and I'm happy for them but, they forgot about me. My brother (who is one of my best friends) simply ignores me, when I ask him what's up he answers with one word, or simply doesn't answer. His gf, she told me I'm her best friend many times, that she loves me and cares about me, but I don't think so. 
Am I wrong, maybe I'm just jealous they have each other? I'm so fucking lonely, please give me your advice! Thanks.",0.9821297359357076,2.873615410447762,2.431492537313435,95.98911021814008,81.4626865671642,5.018599311136625,18.516647531572907,5.8734145424116955,-0.3867777267508612,491,11,112,3,13,159,88,134,0.109,0.609,0.282,0.9822,0,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,6,3,8,19,3,0,2,1,9,2,0,0,0,17,29,10,0,0,4,1,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,6,0,0,0,3,6,0,4,3,2,27,13,12,25,4,9,0,1,0,2,24,1,1,2,9,74,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14633889517188145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14000075009694865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4714760365638282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268524735620473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098911793765983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459017671123918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572064955852338,0.10698503289902364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3471011250500097,0.1384461244659165,0.0,0.14365868341854418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31883405668137016,0.0,0.147852101435842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731627497663868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515977345986854,0.0,0.0,0.15182810898378896,0.15044906950126594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20295578614375834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16438606701403102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19187383094721774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13633136706907595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119947809507033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036743123273455,0.0,0.13787432370149216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919139698832296,0.0,0.0,0.08732337008150967,0.0,0.0,0.1430973615420978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462889171040776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637336309738619,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,untitledtedd_,2020/03/22,"Question Please answer if you feel comfortable. It would be greatly appreciated. Thank you 1.) How do you feel society views mental health?

2.) Do you feel that people from generation z have more mental health issuses? Or is it the fact that this generation is more aware and open about it?

3.) Do you feel that mental health is a taboo subject and should it be a taboo subject in today society?",2.6914459665144577,5.601225328767124,3.8993607305936098,81.5529071537291,83.38356164383562,7.080060882800609,23.179604261796044,8.167268648758528,1.7825476407914764,311,11,56,7,9,101,45,73,0.0,0.836,0.16399999999999998,0.9175,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,5,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,11,3,0,1,1,17,16,5,0,3,2,0,4,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,8,3,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,3,3,12,2,3,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,3,1,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3704568899696867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20194113845435288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5840906112742431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5537646771309958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698422707477258,0.0,0.0,0.2010612412050801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20518781595728566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16863462431622558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736199310339951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13011585617626634,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,d8tn1,2020/03/22,"No One to Count On So simply put, I have no one to count on except myself. 

Luckily there are many services out there to help like Taskrabbit and Uber etc. 

But how do I get over this? I randomly thing multiple times a day like 

""wow, I really don't have anyone to help me. no one needing to see me or talk to me. just me. no team. no companion."" 

Sure people like help from me but i haven't been able to receive help from the same people i help. 

anyways maybe thats another post. 

​

How do I change my perspective? 

I know that I'm doing fine in reality. Im safe, fed, and warm. How do i move on with more happiness?",-0.6192166462668283,1.5831541937984497,1.785026519787845,94.35763769889843,96.2093023255814,5.506487148102815,17.642186862505106,7.0608816371341465,0.3054713178294577,477,14,107,9,19,161,80,129,0.057999999999999996,0.684,0.259,0.9798,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,8,9,0,0,2,0,10,1,0,3,1,18,16,9,0,1,5,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,1,1,1,0,3,7,0,0,3,2,2,16,9,17,14,3,12,0,0,1,0,9,6,0,2,5,73,20,2,0.15653730321301998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16960810263071266,0.1902099572654777,0.0,0.16414301115775146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094545220801316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559571069368542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095361056440982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17458047184987704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178428008987472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16663687006958536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5246182733947587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690871494061584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860288080417298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22942865803584064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870425595673704,0.1572627611210729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16637438012976494,0.0,0.11607042685548745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182211836231749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170465123266136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499194655708237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15736322562234753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028180480499263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473996370780865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475345557353829,0.0,0.0,0.12581875479496685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039964285942682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127816034315818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902099572654777,0.0
mentalhealth,crimson_ragdoll,2020/03/22,Help. Very worried for bf safety in currently situation My bf has very bad depression which often spirals into feeling suicidal especially when he doesn't see me. He's been bad recently regarding the current situation as I haven't been seeing him but I agreed to see him tomorrow to calm him down eventhough I'm worried about getting ill. But I'm very worried for when our country gets put on lockdown because I won't be able to see him at all as we don't live together and I'm scared. He would almost definitely kill himself if he couldn't see me for something like a month. I don't know what to do and I'm scared,3.08434750733138,5.1413400887096765,4.793460410557183,80.77382697947216,75.53225806451613,8.057478005865104,30.62756598240469,8.841846274778883,2.7314129032258068,497,24,95,11,11,168,79,124,0.251,0.63,0.11900000000000001,-0.9675,2,1,1,0,0,0,5.0,2,0,0,0,4,8,1,2,2,0,12,1,0,0,1,14,25,9,2,3,3,0,1,1,2,2,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,2,6,14,2,15,19,1,13,0,1,5,0,14,5,0,3,8,54,16,0,0.13421916168182416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440110250661091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22413478733238876,0.08181875518402132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560276728329096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678652409809053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14024794457429335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08996427485682389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14849361617771484,0.0,0.07376334112600931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06557270272601104,0.0,0.11851797877408468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713245432893644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492732907144198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325252298404863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26875359113115,0.0,0.5347764722348521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017359225855956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332846801761847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468139782284593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322345948657444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40891822152312696,0.0,0.09534544152289018,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chuckfoe,2020/03/22,"The ""good boy"" dilema In a nutshell, I (M,21) got a fondamental need to help people I care about. No mather what is the problem, if someone is in the shit, all my behing urge me to find a way to help him even if its non of my business. 

Through the years, i have learn how to make people in confidence and tell me or ask for my advice when they have a problem and i'm pretty good at it (i think). I'm also pretty good i finding the underlying cause of their problem. 

But the real problem is that people never realy change. Most of the time, unless people get shock by something, they aren't able to change themself in the deep on a long term and sooner or later relapse into their old habit.

So i'm stoke in this dilema, either i try to help my love one with the politically correct way (and fail) and i see them suffer in their loop or i take them with the hard way who sometime work but almost all the time broke the relationship. I don't know anymore witch one to chose.

I also got the 3rd option, i can cut all my relationship forever. I don't get to see my love one suffer but i will eventualy die of loneliness. https://youtu.be/n3Xv_g3g-mA

Please help

P.s. Sorry for bad english, i'm french (not from France)",2.1013360881542735,4.346980008264463,3.4582024793388437,88.22851584022041,79.49586776859505,5.686225895316805,20.82713498622589,6.816661863887847,0.4231234159779613,950,26,191,10,24,310,137,242,0.152,0.6990000000000001,0.149,-0.3989,0,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,7,2,7,19,2,0,18,0,10,3,1,3,5,41,29,19,1,7,11,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,5,0,1,0,6,13,0,3,2,3,29,6,31,26,6,23,0,4,2,2,20,11,1,8,9,124,35,3,0.1002313581986998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979449231976231,0.0,0.0,0.10036722684630316,0.0,0.0,0.16030996187781582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994025743637321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370278967699934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368899742928543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219254975342376,0.10296521486837834,0.21206297354082074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040243253196055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620186678578835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832192910989092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473349552414178,0.0,0.0,0.2522079234374681,0.16032834692065198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978760950090617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26873186645693986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055084533189534365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870159790894773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18092542813564497,0.0,0.0669052099068839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743202820774077,0.07730460251006928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517594970027504,0.0,0.2037580869701333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779512138800901,0.0,0.0,0.11002393239020647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20394265022359467,0.0,0.3836314930222136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408522906702152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21522193633347644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974283097334274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288604882764496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492570453870699,0.0771629964024676,0.09913137616770697,0.11220079944128444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536150741898556,0.0,0.08760662494160709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642242071688664,0.0,0.0,0.11689142200978557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805051285776859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386769602572825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296962251836812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06454570846579931
mentalhealth,riemuidiootti,2020/03/22,"How to stop self harming? I can go months without it but when bad period starts I feel like I have no choice but self harm. And when I do it once I'll do it many times, I just feel like I don't have any control.",0.4662500000000023,1.5780864583333347,2.1191666666666684,101.24250000000002,80.25,5.633333333333334,18.25,5.985473137389443,-0.6523500000000002,162,3,44,1,4,53,32,48,0.29100000000000004,0.5920000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.8658,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,2,0,10,10,6,0,0,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,2,6,2,2,10,0,8,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,9,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680201417317294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20629812628794195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771167253784559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498580826487753,0.3530222647074117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041897558820599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414176910066383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25049626768956224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19721369320427976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631278592960448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.515508273210426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17488165318415286,0.0,0.0,0.20656658597292069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407199321588146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381724316705256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaptainPanther1507,2020/03/22,"am i depressed? hi, i'm 15 and live in america.

recently i haven't had a want/desire to do anything, hell... i don't even really have a want to post this. but i feel like i should.

alright, here we go...

 i don't really want to get out of bed most days, i feel like there's not much that makes me happy anymore. i have 2 friends that make me happy, but i haven't been able to see them due to the corona virus outbreak. the few places i go to, to engage in activities like sports, worship (i'm Christian), and music, have all been closed down due to corona virus.

i feel like my parents are arguing about something most of the time.

my sister's mentally unstable ex, who has threatened to kill our family and burn our house down, just got out of jail. (6' 2"" African, muscular, dangerous and knows some bad people)

my sleep schedule is completely upside down...

playing guitar doesn't make me happy anymore...

i often find myself disgusted with boredom...

i feel like I'm on a fucked up rollercoaster all the time, that determines wether or not I'm happy at the moment...

and i hope this is taken seriously...

i know alot of people (especially at my age) walk around saying they're depressed and they have it the worst, but i wouldn't be posting this if i didn't feel like i have an actual problem, or that this is just a temporary sadness.

 all i want is some advice, or maybe some encouragement. 

thanks

-nolan",3.74251552795031,5.1691406014492784,4.841511387163563,83.76021739130434,72.33333333333333,8.155693581780538,26.186335403726712,8.704169506293173,1.8335726708074531,1090,36,218,20,21,358,153,276,0.172,0.613,0.215,0.8489,1,0,1,0,0,0,58.0,3,0,2,0,8,31,6,0,12,1,25,3,2,3,3,51,51,13,1,8,11,3,5,6,1,2,0,1,1,0,10,12,0,0,8,3,0,3,9,13,0,0,6,7,32,18,27,42,12,28,3,3,1,1,14,14,2,12,15,138,42,0,0.10031630372888102,0.0,0.0978942416386044,0.0,0.0,0.09802793098659357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198973635008254,0.0,0.0,0.08255177046584314,0.08930277861016125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375992339880957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517973586218377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469571694438242,0.0,0.17280457081353084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625797250733267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945692832331902,0.0,0.2536146866649716,0.3583299371402893,0.0,0.0,0.09168728422512222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750412741558277,0.09274080632196782,0.05241112829559312,0.0,0.1140241343984994,0.0,0.0802321121607338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4271542827739279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09963672461151124,0.0,0.11575154577837166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098512697908446,0.0,0.11026243406280888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2940568729782315,0.0,0.08858113407248458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20088573512367816,0.0,0.10078121052331916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109523951226722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374402578257136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113893836567694,0.0,0.0,0.13909338801002094,0.0,0.10480918615981774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921505779693715,0.0,0.0,0.0959891546557924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12853038582897047,0.0,0.09905024768321373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977555112681221,0.0,0.0,0.07993910607629097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038875096370906,0.0,0.0,0.07722839162166421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235777455309163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699048685331065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366766201804061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deviles,2020/03/22,"How to get rid of anxiety chest pains? Suffering with massive anxiety chest pains atm. Last time I had them for a month. I've had them for almost half a day now. Tried muscle relaxants, flicking myself with hair ties ans stretching but I'm at a loss of what to do. What are some of your remedies?",1.3847941888619886,3.9092692711864414,2.4971428571428578,92.1715254237288,85.10169491525423,6.083292978208232,21.987893462469735,7.447530270364453,0.9444266343825668,233,8,48,4,7,74,44,59,0.2,0.777,0.023,-0.8181,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,2,1,2,5,0,0,4,0,4,5,3,1,0,6,6,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,1,2,1,5,1,10,4,1,7,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,2,5,30,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30663990023441823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4685222632438698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19748966079638805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599898175322936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496140809312369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444257115054362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6516895491763524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17856214179469562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20790653612021914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yarrrde,2020/03/22,"How to protect yourself from a toxic mother during quarantine Hi, I'm desperate and feeling either so stressed, like I'm going to puke and cry (which I barely do) or so angry I'm actually scared I'm going to kill her.

My mother is the opposite of me, working half-time have 0 hobby other than complaining on the phone all day, smoke and watch TV. Which, I live in an old appartement with old doors, I have two in my room, one that I use and one that is always closed and have furniture in front of but the TV and couch are right behind it and I can hear EVERYTHING which is already stressing me out on a normal day because she's always complaining and it is bringing me down.

I am working full time (doing an apprenticeship so I don't have enough money to leave this shit house yet), am very active (I do CrossFit 5 to 6 times a week), and although I am an introvert and need to be spending time alone in SILENCE and CALM, I have to be always doing something out of home so I don't see my mother because I can always hear this stupid TV or her complaining behind my door. I tried asking her to take her phone calls away, it doesn't work.

I am already going insane in the house because of her on normal times but now with the COVID-19 situation I'm actually scared for me. I live in Switzerland and while we do not HAVE to stay inside at all cost, my mother which while she is always on her phone and watching TV, is a fucking boomer and cannot make the difference between our situation and other countries'. She is constantly watching French news and doesn't know the actual Swiss directive.

I live in a small small village in the middle of fields and since my CrossFit closed since two weeks and I cannot handle my mother anymore, I started taking a dumbbell, a sandbag or a jump rope to the fields and just do 40 to 60 minutes wods outside. If I see somebody, it's farmers and they are so far away I couldn't even talk to them while screaming. My mother doesn't understand that in Switzerland it is not prohibited to go outside as long as you are not more than 5 people and keeping your distance. I am litterally going ALONE in field and she is freaking out and sreaming to me that the autorities will fine me and she isn0t making any sense.

I cannot stay inside with her any longer, I need to protect myself from her, and every time I go outside she gets even worst. I'm so down and helpless, I want to kill her, help.",6.484428231562254,5.817269265979379,6.8668556701030985,79.05516058683587,65.61855670103093,9.358445678033307,32.468279143536876,8.502166056373571,2.4181911181601894,1914,67,376,23,26,624,216,485,0.154,0.799,0.047,-0.9948,2,3,2,0,0,0,42.0,2,2,2,3,12,19,5,4,21,0,43,2,1,4,2,63,76,45,2,7,11,6,1,1,0,1,0,3,5,0,17,35,0,3,3,4,3,9,12,16,0,4,0,9,61,3,56,72,7,61,0,1,5,1,40,31,2,4,20,260,78,3,0.0,0.0,0.2288914615268971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16195188992508974,0.17255789426566698,0.0,0.32528037134163884,0.0,0.0,0.1063367839885282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753838114825114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309229833468467,0.0,0.14691451623040075,0.0,0.0,0.14298231137237516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798354928427025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449006770680198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588240731928429,0.10084554486597784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168654730523303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078586981119835,0.0,0.10328073719255892,0.0,0.0658741242193218,0.0,0.07026751886888809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039532618959506056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722806515374821,0.040848367091700435,0.0,0.2666055769466191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17624005933526413,0.0,0.0524056696252469,0.0,0.07842579841283966,0.0,0.0,0.18042968305203447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949430394606453,0.1729999469956774,0.0,0.04296835929213095,0.0,0.0,0.08278648726846062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038197177723744064,0.0,0.20711601522397846,0.06919114873178095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437801434761428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594617937513173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320914280349104,0.0,0.0,0.16408373581247415,0.0,0.10596018135115244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05420354377239574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06676945093222053,0.0,0.0,0.15655338666189927,0.0,0.12460643592980145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025564448304888,0.12935066315599195,0.17576613715005548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060190531924278284,0.0,0.0,0.05533965269441317,0.16666933505504072,0.0,0.0,0.17912100656371954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757058252390852,0.06284203611302244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22795112930351705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05308239386227418,0.0,0.15275051261689268,0.08139320596782461,0.0,0.06752662376823143,0.0,0.06451070510792989,0.046115461437056506,0.0,0.1254303717484467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17075854743066654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,classicrock2833,2020/03/22,"Is it normal to feel amazing after one dose of antidepressants Started Pristiq last night at a dose of 50 mg. Woke up a few hours later loaded with energy. I feel like I just took Adderall or cocaine. I feel wide awake and so happy. I’m taking Xanax to calm me down so I can sleep or I’d never sleep. But it feels so good and fun, I feel like I can do anything. I’m just so excited and happy :)",-0.18428571428571414,1.9563615238095269,2.436,92.559,88.5238095238095,4.7885714285714265,17.923809523809524,6.2581,-0.15242476190476184,304,8,67,3,10,105,56,84,0.0,0.636,0.364,0.9883,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,0,2,0,4,5,2,0,1,16,15,10,0,1,5,0,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,5,7,9,9,13,1,12,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,9,39,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609644304462064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4945132413448512,0.27947734575832883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16406234066826458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4164456161955488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19262934782293886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944238131389538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911232866787031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086093084672228,0.0,0.0,0.183559968732884,0.19164920464547736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254551333196404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3914881057279198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384486621381915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470689556648254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21732189781405725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,T1gereyes,2020/03/22,"Emotionally numb solutions needed Hey, so this is more of a thing to ask for solutions than anything. I’ve recently just realized that I’ve been depressed for the past 8 years without knowing and I’ve now come to the realization of it. Around 4th grade my parents divorced due to how me and my brother were treated so we all moved in with grandparents. Before that I took a lot of verbal abuse to try and protect my brother so in a way I had to harden my heart in a way so I could actually take it. I now realized in those 8 years after I haven’t cried once. After a few years my dad moved to the state I was in and soon had visitation on every other weekend. During this time my brother really didn’t want to go so when he stayed at home all I would hear is just terrible things about him like how it didn’t matter if he wanted to go, he should just stop being a mamas boy and come. This was about 3 years ago and all this stuff with my dad has been resolved and I now have a healthy relationship with him again which is a plus. At some point Though I just didn’t care that I was practically a verbal punching bag to most people and coped with it by using humor to mask Everything. This year is my final year at high school now and everything is going fine so far so I’m enjoying that. What really made me realized that I didn’t really feel emotion and that I unknowingly was depressed for the past 8 years was that I recently just got a girlfriend. About a month in I realized that I feel nothing for her at all. I don’t know if I like her or not a this point because i have no idea what I’m supposed to feel when in love. Am I supposed to feel happy and then it hit me. When was the last time I’ve actually been happy. At this point in time I’ve kinda forgotten because of how long it is. I also kinda realized that I couldn’t really feel any emotion when our family dog died. I’ve known her since she was a puppy and when she passed away I couldn’t feel sad or happy at all. I just felt numb. So at this point I have no idea how I’m supposed to actually feel anything at this point and I just need to know how I can start feeling actual emotions again and not ones that I think I remember from my childhood and imitate them. I fake emotions a lot to kinda make me not look like a weirdo and it’s worked so far but I need some ideas on how to actually feel emotions. I’m never happy but at the same time I’m never sad or angry. The only times I’ve actually 100% know that I’ve been happy is when I’ve traveled to far places. Last year I went all around japan with a few friends for a trip and found a side of me that’s very extroverted which was new to me. I think traveling might be in the right step so I joined the navy to travel the world and was lucky enough to get a medic job which is something I wanted because I like to help people out. I enjoy things like video games and art but every strategy I use to fix my problem never works. I’ve talked to a therapist and at this point nothing he says actually works. So give me some of your ideas for me to try out.",3.920199335548176,4.333418728682177,5.217890365448504,85.00563953488374,71.01550387596897,8.561461794019934,26.209856035437433,8.634040054169528,1.5731949058693244,2420,70,532,39,42,810,254,645,0.055,0.83,0.115,0.987,3,0,1,0,3,0,31.0,2,1,1,4,44,29,0,0,30,0,44,5,1,10,9,127,94,55,1,14,19,6,10,5,2,3,3,2,1,1,40,33,0,2,29,7,0,16,17,9,0,1,26,13,66,20,77,59,17,108,0,4,1,1,36,40,0,17,53,351,106,6,0.0,0.060888490936522724,0.3510431140761631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045553942995605404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04109639184409832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03494681547486337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457882737755959,0.09149560637867184,0.04804251109966719,0.0,0.048282393887674094,0.0,0.0,0.09398020636469342,0.0,0.0437289213028233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05239530992359856,0.0,0.0,0.08853549742145128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04103056104489986,0.0,0.056449264846073786,0.0,0.0,0.08852389162833457,0.0,0.053334482580824016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.346839541976522,0.0,0.053099384415704304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659621919388574,0.0,0.09237164878157042,0.0,0.0484457149535578,0.0,0.2338579707561003,0.0,0.049342251809494135,0.056294996659082525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056346245857290825,0.0397036197814998,0.0,0.026849041200214217,0.04929776367569197,0.08761799588680548,0.0,0.041101104956843264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735269042569311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057920021669386715,0.06089714168838285,0.034445489087345946,0.05429612848371053,0.05154814360189819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23205124462388715,0.0,0.0,0.05099643122731218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129699257108793,0.08377906602366893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553226376643606,0.0,0.0,0.045478341859280506,0.04315447586539377,0.0,0.0,0.08737951359171449,0.0463812866158048,0.048626256346445816,0.034303079990008305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05176980108433174,0.0,0.054516439957339714,0.0,0.0,0.04101883544730267,0.10923841554526796,0.0,0.11431462144111686,0.1189049089236559,0.049632573793437364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986197678264349,0.0,0.0,0.054728442973204484,0.034823047740105306,0.03908424658312781,0.0,0.0,0.05706227376369107,0.0,0.09811472775489384,0.07125441154970223,0.0,0.05369138671266652,0.0,0.2914797401916886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04917308312066628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13168644663166396,0.0,0.10148242434084896,0.0551733961221165,0.058214607639013226,0.043886594902813394,0.0,0.04086721901679941,0.0,0.052009205162290295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04251016052311049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03956236654135698,0.0,0.0,0.03637395374611517,0.05477467231014857,0.0,0.04296416065875114,0.0,0.0,0.058829007990775374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03863872216766009,0.041305161915436865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05966750030310981,0.10242326739078296,0.0658569973511678,0.0504902020390845,0.0,0.14982898211245765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057095941102098285,0.06978058029172833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876854732501559,0.0,0.04240195392411652,0.09093307852264099,0.08158163737295837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04763884478935988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049537918103169605,0.0,0.11223712480262693,0.0,0.0,0.036505828238282995,0.0,0.0,0.26474668906598964
mentalhealth,DankussMemeus,2020/03/22,"Fast time or something like that So ever since I was in elementary (highschool now) I’ve been having these episodes where it feels like time speeds up, or it feels like all my movements are very fast and precise. And it kinda comes in stages, the first part: all of my thoughts are extremely loud and it feels like my tongue swells up (it doesn’t). Stage 2: Time feels like it’s speeding up and everything around me and myself is rushing. Stage 3: It happens pretty sudden but it feels like time immediately slows down and then goes back to normal. It always happens at night or when in tired. I always thought that this was just some normal thing and that it was my brain growing or getting bigger or something like that. But then recently tried looking it up and nothing popped up so now I’m turning to reddit for some answers. I have literally no clue what it is.",5.007630522088356,6.429859421686749,4.661626506024098,86.27970883534141,69.24096385542168,6.979116465863456,28.29116465863454,7.1686216300943375,1.392571887550201,688,24,133,6,12,209,98,166,0.038,0.85,0.111,0.8294,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,0,0,1,0,11,2,1,0,4,35,25,20,0,2,8,0,5,7,0,0,1,1,0,0,20,10,0,0,8,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,6,7,9,7,15,19,5,40,0,0,1,0,0,13,0,8,27,89,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20274989298807286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845733987992867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368217743887852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360060958820838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494847693052994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020506560737453,0.0,0.0,0.10949578568515317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3080125243385724,0.4351881586040121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363122112545167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365279606651451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154733167909025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41665068543754014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230916743482504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433216466189107,0.2387412525084158,0.11690220002219273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319334365016636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394812050319322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12029554449884805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078164647871148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18758623301197072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094053592795929,0.0,0.0,0.19344383556147096,0.284167574466134,0.140029291616775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271671628030029,0.13251948956952234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052511394455306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chase_Die_Repeat,2020/03/22,"State of Being Hello, 

I am looking to see if I can get some people that might be willing to share their experiences since being Isolated during this Heath Crisis related to COVID-19.   


Specifically I am curious about those that suffer from paranoia, Schizophrenia, Mania, or even BPD.   


How are you feeling day to day? Are you finding it difficult to cope with being isolated, or are you embracing it? Any feedback would be great!",6.297599999999999,8.644334160000003,6.434333333333335,71.19550000000002,67.4,9.266666666666666,33.83333333333333,9.725611199111238,3.822333333333333,342,16,51,8,6,109,56,75,0.19399999999999998,0.693,0.113,-0.8048,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,1,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,14,0,0,1,0,10,18,4,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,7,2,9,10,1,3,0,1,2,0,6,0,0,5,2,42,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19779741737859016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3663328836347571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751662892264839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19211285422971736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28452069399205626,0.0,0.0,0.14706952080186594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658443233696928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519643760477577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.320678462372182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442524092257067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085606193786941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2016483961392678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23178085974769036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406056131171256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20662136010626064,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gor1lla_,2020/03/22,"I miss my girlfriend Me and my girlfriend only see each other at school, and now that the coronavirus has closed my school I can’t see her until April 28 and school may have to start later than that. I really miss them. I want to feel them in my arms, laugh with them. Kiss them. Quarantine is hell. They don’t have a phone either, so we can’t even talk. Will they lose interest in me? I hope this time apart doesn’t change anything. I wonder what there doing to pass the time. Do they even think about me? My anxiety is punching me down in to the ground right now.",1.8590988142292488,3.917058704347826,2.44205533596838,96.17494071146244,79.34782608695652,5.920948616600791,17.41106719367589,6.980632752743323,-0.1984782608695648,441,8,99,5,11,136,73,115,0.10099999999999999,0.7809999999999999,0.11800000000000001,0.4631,0,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,7,1,7,8,1,0,4,0,13,2,1,0,0,14,23,5,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,0,3,24,4,13,21,2,18,1,3,2,1,13,9,1,3,8,70,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15443229964791175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612428604926818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21355487654995373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666704376111956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207305916294004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20050544824139768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22584426041379066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15353352040249105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932501908187038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17239844702074156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.61291878902552,0.32173330382623955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288675509506307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16225787815005666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935207315506014,0.0,0.0,0.2354275504133977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906993129932927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21892266737908425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRAtesto3o,2020/03/22,"Should I see my therapist face to face? UK Gov recommends to social distance for ""non essential"" things.

Therapy has massively changed my life and I'm in a stage of my life where it's working really well.

My old therapist did phone calls and video calls and it didn't benefit me anywhere near as much as face to face.

So I've taken the advice to social distance. I don't meet up with friends or go to places with large amounts of people (except stores for supplies), but decided to do face to face with my therapist.",6.106468646864684,6.31023788118812,6.396782178217823,79.18283003300331,66.22772277227723,10.693729372937293,33.665016501650165,10.504223727775694,3.448345214521451,410,17,80,10,6,132,66,101,0.018000000000000002,0.9279999999999999,0.054000000000000006,0.35200000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,6,8,6,0,0,11,10,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,1,1,1,1,2,0,1,0,3,1,8,3,20,6,2,8,0,0,1,0,7,5,0,1,1,48,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706342860350932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35660816150756874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18472225462674588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490911532285133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923919931819404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466751329048065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12836401892929344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18323178475476956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105784910699598,0.0,0.1824382139896997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186449820480678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391476098121153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3560012816873483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996904299394177,0.6082334349148679,0.11600816641076893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700218233162092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712368374162106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iphone4bruh,2020/03/22,"My girlfriend has eating disorder, can’t get professional help, and we have to be careful when meeting.. My girlfriend has depression and eating disorder. I have tried my best to get her professional help, and I finally did! But then corona hit, and help has been canceled. 

She lives with her family which she has a lot of problems with, and she can’t talk to them. I really don’t know how I can help her properly. I used to make good meals and do thing to distract her from her struggles (going to the movies was our favorite thing).. 

How can I help her?",4.405630841121496,5.891130065420562,5.065502336448598,82.56778621495327,70.77570093457945,8.714485981308412,28.328271028037385,9.188382445141503,2.3306457943925234,435,16,85,9,8,140,62,107,0.133,0.6609999999999999,0.20600000000000002,0.8398,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,2,0,1,1,3,7,0,2,2,0,16,3,0,4,0,17,24,11,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,9,3,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,3,0,21,3,10,19,2,4,0,1,0,0,21,0,0,1,3,65,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747821644602321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698070905696003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434478057790414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817575591669936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3408409771636355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570069137642927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18244552060562816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17402922427368964,0.0,0.0946532363601028,0.13969281126935298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5581690702562994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153058944970732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706519921661745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14159340788356595,0.0,0.0,0.11117228277060118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936422918832086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669510497494164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17411244350111674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386521390166575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22129457856211315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307536242151273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14384425607302054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaylolkeklol,2020/03/22,"Bisexual teen I’ve been having a hard time in life with this for a long time now. It all started when about a year ago. It’s crazy it’s been that long. How it started isn’t that important, but to keep it simple I just started masturbating to boys and girls instead of just girls. After a month of blowing it off and telling myself it was just puberty the reality set it that I might be gay. Ever since then I’ve gone through ups and down of thinking I’m gay, straight, or bi. It’s strange because I grew up just life very one else. I don’t look different form everyone else. I’m decently popular at school. I dress normal for someone from California. Jeans, vans, household brands and stuff. I don’t really know what to since recently I Jacky decided to try and accept it. A huge obstacle has been accepting I won’t live a life like other kids. Some kids go home and talk to their friends about girls and stuff. I know I can do the same but they will always think about girls. It’s just hard for me to accept that I’m different. I just wish things could’ve turned out better. This pain in a my brain has caused me to not have any happy memories in around a year and 2 months. I don’t know when or if it will get better. But right now, I’d do anything to be straight.",1.9812931034482768,3.916578666666666,3.2091044061302685,91.42446120689655,78.42528735632183,6.95536398467433,23.13553639846744,7.937092434478242,1.0249858237547884,996,32,221,17,24,322,146,261,0.07,0.773,0.158,0.9756,2,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,2,2,17,10,0,0,10,0,21,8,1,2,2,43,39,18,0,3,13,0,2,1,1,4,4,0,1,7,23,11,0,1,9,0,0,3,6,1,0,1,5,3,18,9,31,28,4,38,0,0,1,3,12,14,0,5,21,137,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530116637820232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884373357793584,0.0,0.0,0.08078203968121768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775497561887064,0.1057492879495029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241396826045013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21012219622543768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261018398796118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203120964864865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484504855258727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482228880100376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984694868364133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107453375025703,0.0,0.11351001224924186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177772981873207,0.0,0.062063460780809036,0.0,0.06751173484946707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264553632902966,0.21282703314633789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11915718572231156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558701153864544,0.0,0.0,0.1958534897433915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25171705758976004,0.058035344136849236,0.0,0.10489474123550767,0.21025281799166531,0.0997546281230656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260186130287099,0.0,0.0,0.18963588800614728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639008242728276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049594179433947,0.0,0.12640213421209046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610063758834683,0.0,0.11729190655362112,0.0,0.0,0.10144697314302163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022296218179668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19653049512925733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065133616600558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522429126907112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719748391000464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547980791817733,0.10382868067168012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891954615620138,0.15223311483515606,0.0,0.0,0.13853612255011716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065137737885447,0.1292106341251137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801512034545504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13660393319074388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299518175685353
mentalhealth,KingMoose98,2020/03/22,"Hello some advice please Hello, so ive been dealing with some weird stuff (as far as i know). My inner voice is split into 2 very distinct voices, one is firm and calculated the other kind of weird and impulsive. they are a part of my decision making process.I've been doing this for solid 8 years now maybe a little longer. This wouldn't be so much of a problem, but during a conversation if a key word is said or phrase they will start having a conversation about it and I'll pay more attention to the conversation in my head than the conversation that I am having with the person. And if I have a memory where I said something I will impulsively repeat it with zero context. I don't know if this is normal, or if I should get professional help.

Thank you for reading",5.178344370860927,6.031753357615898,6.240721854304638,77.21446026490068,68.40397350993378,8.953907284768214,26.35827814569536,9.120678840339163,2.007468344370861,611,17,116,11,10,204,99,151,0.046,0.884,0.071,0.6671,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,2,0,5,5,0,0,11,0,19,1,1,1,1,28,27,15,0,8,7,0,0,0,0,4,0,4,0,1,8,8,0,0,4,1,1,0,2,3,0,2,4,4,14,2,15,18,5,10,0,0,0,0,14,6,0,8,4,88,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014607242805953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21254566161852373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771199351578097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21158337423884846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13818714305501936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214687707151948,0.2266042912838057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20663012976635808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376158314891934,0.0,0.20711908801461654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15155399788612814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019965958389675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970181893690964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22325513308374048,0.0,0.0,0.18001413952598358,0.0,0.22630576842463795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19727076176567174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20621943216100336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3922176678486529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587148433567748,0.0,0.0,0.1459236864671955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360080451286904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18980778199791254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701065953183625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276262569002292
mentalhealth,spiritedMuse,2020/03/22,"Being cared for hurts. Physically. I need some insight.

My mom is incredibly cold. I can’t tell sometimes if she’s teasing me or criticizing me, and when I ask her to please not tease me that way, she always gets offended. When I get emotional about it, she accuses me of trying to manipulate her. She rarely pays me any sort of compliment, and the few interactions we have are usually about her. Her eating and workout habits, her family drama, etc. Or, she’s asking me when I’m going to get my work in for school. I’m never seriously asked, “How are you holding up?” She calls me selfish and dramatic. She says she has to walk on eggshells around me. She says it’s hard to live with an anxious and depressed teenager.

My dad is incredibly kind and affectionate, and he’ll hold me all day while I cry if I need him to. One time, we cried together on the phone for a while after he realized how truly lonely I was in my own home with my mom. However, he lives a good ways away, and I can’t often make the drive to spend the weekend with him. (It’s painful even now to think about how kind and gentle he is with me.)

I don’t have many friends. Nobody prefers to talk to me over someone else, even though I try to reach out first. My mom blames it on me and says I’m on my phone too much.

I cry for an hour and my chest squeezes to the point of pain whenever I experience someone being nice to me in a way that isn’t superficial. A genuine, caring hug. A kind word. Validation.

What is this? Am I really in a horrible situation? How in the world do I cope with the few months left before I go to college? Do I really even deserve to be cared for?",2.0935124378109435,3.9456780179104487,3.946492537313436,86.65725124378109,77.77611940298506,7.5711442786069645,24.00248756218905,8.447377352677275,1.4548129353233827,1276,43,277,26,30,431,178,335,0.124,0.73,0.146,0.8365,1,2,0,0,0,0,44.0,2,1,0,2,18,22,3,0,15,0,20,5,1,6,2,45,39,25,0,5,5,4,2,0,1,1,2,3,1,0,8,20,1,2,4,3,2,4,6,10,0,2,1,6,56,12,46,34,7,39,0,3,0,1,42,17,0,7,15,187,64,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607740658715538,0.0,0.0,0.062175798660235676,0.0,0.0,0.10329031304829127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813924290839653,0.2564252098518333,0.0,0.08590185859290961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780052544442212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933606479854434,0.0,0.2796581201706519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012959616974821,0.05896503597518275,0.0,0.07874885862579975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355611185117264,0.0763783565161097,0.10284687954305848,0.0,0.0,0.10196905039492936,0.18116672557611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943646291630215,0.0861924320706751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077770640748483,0.0,0.0,0.07063889044175442,0.0,0.14330581117632593,0.0,0.1039239922578892,0.07668747099997865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190366828184144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171213326163788,0.0,0.09004051426272196,0.0,0.0978781206359778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856320361250009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933938334657656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16146941417456762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610304935057335,0.09269606217732126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212464937990848,0.07297886286329214,0.0,0.06721185479654371,0.13558894737740962,0.07051675120697384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061955596686110566,0.0,0.1945767568635018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036310924905817,0.08643126893174659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714529465412216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21812734123542127,0.0,0.09253243320483394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102771586132492,0.0,0.0,0.15493734094947104,0.0,0.090426990929972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07348828200755186,0.07991418847649204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585849003984231,0.08982989132599964,0.0,0.053313794110898975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415046268618195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069765444687193,0.0,0.0,0.21771955716488284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656241090075231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sluggishweevil,2020/03/22,"College student - being home is taking a toll I'm home for the rest of my semester, like a lot of students at the moment. I've got a lot going mental health wise, OCD, ADHD, MDD, Panic disorder, GAD, those are what I'm diagnosed and treated for. But I feel so much worse at the moment. I feel this constant sense of desperation, I'm always right on the verge of crying, I'm paranoid. I feel like im drowning. For the most part I'm ok during the day, I try to stay around my family as much as I can, but as soon as I'm alone for the night I fall apart. I can't sleep and I'm scared in a way that doesn't feel like anxiety. I don't know what to do, my therapist doesn't offer call appointments and the quarantine has shut everything down. I'll probably feel better in the morning, but I know the next night will be just as bad. I'm worried im going to totally loose it some night. Sorry for how long this is, I just can't talk to my family about any of this. If you've read this, thanks",2.2179680094786747,3.2456873933649315,4.205257701421804,88.40134626777254,75.54028436018956,7.7394549763033185,22.66617298578199,8.278499904357787,1.0549263033175351,764,20,174,13,16,262,117,211,0.145,0.7559999999999999,0.099,-0.8297,0,2,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,1,7,11,0,2,14,1,14,3,1,1,1,23,34,14,1,1,6,0,5,3,0,1,2,0,2,0,9,4,0,0,7,1,0,3,5,3,0,0,1,5,14,8,27,30,9,26,0,0,0,0,3,11,0,5,13,99,23,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073639948754998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128455503561053,0.0,0.0,0.09744001164354907,0.0,0.0,0.07963481955000301,0.0,0.08958433383523791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10424749729806564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777705155537064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035690807380888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957640296701184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265479553401686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12863338071478425,0.0755224717788179,0.0,0.0,0.11885822017857328,0.0,0.0,0.13421147078540868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524563515018497,0.0,0.2207906909899945,0.0,0.2960568167567418,0.16731841824056268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13310594393161826,0.0,0.0936588651088456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447620708615725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349299676147876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252985096774523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287147273123359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716334785342715,0.0,0.0,0.10363346411355127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199115475979444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801341315378973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17217000967184595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12454156370082972,0.32968286074140224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13739645725919894,0.0,0.12681235387534145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12625805130497186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171358133896259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000628149547552,0.0,0.0,0.11724165645358588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718869454812975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310884786353682,0.0,0.12481741429249014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804772697179047,0.09412385852397416,0.0,0.1078137433462037,0.0,0.13596691300973185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795060128386134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295180236754777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118924921632099,0.1193391061795542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deco19,2020/03/22,"Thoughts around an App for groups for mental health Hi guys,

Myself and a number of other developers are looking to develop an application with the aim of connecting people that are going/gone through similar life experiences. Some, of which, related to this reddit, can have an impact on ones mental health. Anything from substance abuse to going out dating again. For people who are going through this shared experience and those who have, offering help, just like reddit like these.

I would like to hear the thoughts of you all here about what you think. Do you attend other help groups with people in a similar situation? Is it mainly driven though places like this on the internet?",7.814500000000002,9.372022783333335,7.075000000000002,71.05500000000002,62.83333333333334,10.0,30.833333333333336,10.125756701596842,3.278083333333333,554,19,86,12,8,171,80,120,0.032,0.8170000000000001,0.151,0.912,0,0,0,0,1,0,14.0,0,3,0,1,6,5,0,0,8,0,9,3,0,0,1,13,17,3,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,1,3,1,0,1,13,6,0,0,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,3,2,5,5,22,13,3,12,0,0,1,0,14,6,0,1,6,67,18,0,0.0,0.19429572924170252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494590431599804,0.14598165671644625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32081811967823204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18639321535352185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16237119849382706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34861734628048197,0.1848233167690227,0.0,0.2198317389172988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582764544094505,0.32045967777114176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770632560185073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3305171637395719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112066255897228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34106021451995344,0.0,0.17132970410140966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18432631358773088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507513923570376,0.16111469464684128,0.2603719732395294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164904304579338,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PM-me-beatles-pics,2020/03/22,"Am I Traumatized By This? When I was younger, I had pretty much unlimited access to the internet.  I saw pornography when I was 5, and it wasn’t just regular, run-of-the-mill porn, it was graphic fetish stuff.  I would, and still do, go out and find some weird pornography do laugh at and share to others — going more and more extreme as time went on.


Due to this, I have a fairly warped view of sexual things.  Me hitting puberty at age 9 didn’t help things either.  I grew up in puberty having the opposite problem of sheltered kids.  I didn’t have a lack of things to grab on, I had too much.


I think I might’ve been molested or sexually abused in some way when I was younger, but I’m not sure.  I don’t have any memories of it, but something just seems correct about it.  I’m not sure if i have been, but due to my exposure to pornography at such a young age, I became hyperaware of anything I could do that could be seen as sexual.  Instead of bending down, I squat, even in private.  I am only nude in the shower, and I never just sit with my underwear on anymore.  Instead of avoiding it, I actively pursue pornography that is weird and will make me uncomfortable.",4.67639367816092,5.2227130474137935,5.8532068965517245,80.64581609195403,69.38793103448276,9.80735632183908,30.552873563218387,9.888512548439397,2.8116732183908044,905,35,185,21,15,303,129,232,0.11199999999999999,0.838,0.05,-0.8869,1,1,1,0,1,0,33.0,0,0,0,0,13,9,1,1,6,0,28,2,1,1,4,36,39,17,0,6,11,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,14,9,0,1,3,0,0,4,7,5,0,0,14,4,25,4,31,19,8,31,0,0,3,2,3,14,0,5,11,139,39,0,0.0,0.21782923263332205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502260904780654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823273254820914,0.0,0.0,0.15129083330285747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935745488007863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142954435774135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16803329056926974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20896954980418908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322910849274102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271963841200932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19503315157191295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702981425787566,0.0,0.14179453111085316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139824313434372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18703900882352148,0.0,0.1759172348934718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16736786539361326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153479273852015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14682085644436765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21046141019605316,0.0,0.0,0.34654819889324656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36642034309556426,0.11780205894325015,0.0,0.0,0.10720295969828894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14592959352899626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17042848072589828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13059999401330502,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EmTheCrackhead,2020/03/22,"Save me. i dont want to be stuck in quarantine with dad my dad is emotionally abusive, it drains my self esteem and mood to be around him. 
should i just run away? my psychologist has been cancelled but everythings gonna be fine just as long as i dont get a stupid virus right? 
fucking kill me already. im already feeling suicidal before its even started",2.5445714285714303,4.9278677428571465,3.649999999999999,86.70500000000001,78.71428571428572,6.857142857142858,27.142857142857146,7.957251820313856,1.786571428571429,282,12,56,5,7,91,55,70,0.248,0.634,0.11800000000000001,-0.9117,0,1,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,3,0,1,0,9,1,0,0,0,10,16,4,2,2,3,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,1,9,2,8,9,0,7,0,0,0,1,4,4,1,0,2,34,11,0,0.0,0.2365043571482881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4405476094609871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17769457935030555,0.0,0.0,0.18753948985021315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16985279586406732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4678811804787509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22453357398932394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184004726987214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17939595051376706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092844985422184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845355634445524,0.10428761053914867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21561227616194945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208380943977108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664793198459047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17046523497745888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20823601282209706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412844761850789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21834015506846885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773472539023537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrsGibbs99,2020/03/22,"I don't know what's wrong with me I have been diagnosed with depression but then told it was a sad moment in my life, I've been told I show signs of social anxiety. 

I don't actually know what's wrong with me, I feel low and like nothing matters, I cant sleep much, i fluctuate between eating lots and not eating at all. I feel horrible and like I'm manipulating everyone when I cry or argue, I'm terrified of being alone. And I cant be around to many people, I over think and never actually had a real childhood, the only one I feel any sort of comfort around is my fiancee, I don't feel comfortable in my family home and I don't feel like I belong anywhere.

I have been to therapy but they don't really tell me anything they just say that I grew up too fast or I'm having sad moment in life and that's it. 
I just want to know is there something wrong with me or is just in my head?",2.1649206349206342,3.4415631640211646,4.495428571428572,85.27457142857145,76.08994708994709,8.002962962962963,23.711111111111112,8.648137234880735,1.4590215873015864,694,21,153,14,15,243,100,189,0.217,0.6709999999999999,0.11199999999999999,-0.9713,0,1,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,0,8,13,1,0,3,0,20,7,2,1,2,40,35,14,0,1,9,0,5,3,1,0,3,1,1,0,6,13,2,0,9,1,0,1,9,8,0,1,7,6,28,5,20,26,3,18,0,4,0,0,9,10,0,5,10,102,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.2476560274592053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142155270057468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862907204566865,0.0,0.09707181798058967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442107314529024,0.22592106564662198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938459532376196,0.0,0.0,0.10929165193511088,0.12879242408490113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596838148836553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12125047565878375,0.0,0.0,0.11962221992412075,0.0,0.3208013298505866,0.09065146965383436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022751230931556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12728274062087255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20920911133967005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17925474801389438,0.18597865357012625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787880209582032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864828697237898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328001406652092,0.0,0.09786671658479704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12175602699958872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598511301130288,0.09650687052131386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879707410359554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14443055674672842,0.08129008466022257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090938828338572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269833590266019,0.12935012802063764,0.0,0.0976874449198593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090895568597096,0.0,0.1451117397933672,0.0,0.0,0.08130709009285747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425009513175675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484402372043615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4162085259219829,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Biggay38,2020/03/22,"Was does ICD-10 Schizotypal disorder means in DSM-5, I live in Europe, I'm leaving to USA in 1 year, just checked myself and got diagnoosed with F21.4 WHAT DOES IT MEAN IN DSM-5?? What does it mean in DSM-5?",1.763249999999999,4.461178825000005,1.9850000000000032,95.08,85.75,6.2,20.5,7.554174236665415,0.7555999999999998,163,5,34,3,5,49,28,40,0.083,0.917,0.0,-0.5007,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,7,4,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452392624889393,0.0,0.5617652047748555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113910510353708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22657359494411725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18894798611123587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6992598364574732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779590443326412
mentalhealth,chinmang,2020/03/22,"I've had cervical vertigo for so long now. If I can't get it dealt with, then I'm ending it. It's pain and dizziness all the time. Haven't been happy in 3 years. Not much is known about it. Help. I'm only 18. Live in Washington state, USA.",-1.8546698113207545,0.03531850943396364,1.0201650943396243,99.54836084905662,99.75471698113206,4.914150943396227,14.172169811320755,6.6274283507984215,-0.5312622641509432,183,4,46,3,8,63,44,53,0.12300000000000001,0.8240000000000001,0.053,-0.5571,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,1,6,8,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,5,6,2,9,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,6,24,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3298856966512657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19459302397268155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3964866159676324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496495809195292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3288857024576529,0.3296120707502274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27379820743444194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28326977025325234,0.3963197221598893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21718224118766166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23984962082973355
mentalhealth,CrimsonKing21,2020/03/22,"I feel like I'm depressed I'm an hourly employee at a children's museum and we are closed until further notice. As of now the schools plan to reopen on April 3rd, so if that keeps up then we'll reopen then as well, but that's 2 weeks away. I'll be paid through the end of next week, but there is nothing for me to do to work from home. 

It's been hard. The week before I went to Colorado with my family, which was really fun, but this has already been 2 weeks for me of no work and no real social interaction. Especially with my friends and people from work.

I'm processing a break up, and I did a lot of reflecting in Colorado and felt good and was ready to get back to work and start getting out thos box I've been in (she also works there as well). 

But without any work, and only hobbies to keep me occupied, my mental health is starting to feel it. I have no motivation to do anything. I don't know how I can be productive. I have no interest in doing anything. My birthday is tomorrow and I can't do jack shit. Even at work I'm just thinking about my place there. What I bring to the table. What my next step will be. Now I'm thinking more about my ex and its just counter intuitive. I texted her on Wednesday asking how she was doing and she never replied (though I texted her the Friday before to find out what was happening at work, she said we were closing and that she was ""stressed tf out, which gave me hope that she wanted to have some sort of dialogue).

I don't know how I can do 2 more weeks of this. I'm scared that it may last longer. Its been cloudy all week so no sun, and the past 2 days its been pretty cold. 

HEB, a really big grocery chain in Texas, is hiring part time during this pandemic, so I've been thinking about working there in the mean time. But yeah shit is hard. For anyone else feeling this way you're not alone.",3.3990478960636,4.272831811518326,4.322542175683541,89.27148826837309,72.50785340314134,7.544076013185961,25.14291254605391,7.793537801064563,1.0976646112080664,1440,42,319,18,27,466,193,382,0.067,0.8079999999999999,0.125,0.9781,1,1,0,0,0,0,42.0,3,0,0,11,23,13,2,2,12,1,40,3,2,4,2,59,71,33,0,3,10,1,6,1,1,3,1,1,1,1,20,22,0,2,13,1,1,3,11,5,2,0,18,8,35,8,50,47,6,53,0,1,0,0,19,21,2,6,28,210,55,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593633666186523,0.09156418799518792,0.06635450661458038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564253598559735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058017550087786814,0.08501696155461927,0.13656153518216158,0.0,0.0775697567960996,0.0,0.0779570731353031,0.06380210431214232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14121001224847635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05351155024162094,0.0,0.07146563103257274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931436900682011,0.0,0.07349058940969924,0.0,0.0,0.05480373341842895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822077241059694,0.0,0.12586287644808905,0.059276846567273174,0.07966832675948282,0.0,0.07583699428740044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410572761249951,0.0,0.08670127969740961,0.0,0.0,0.06959489449044617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337388716944528,0.0,0.14865732506570326,0.0,0.0,0.08819778606935809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322997426579896,0.08241218811351915,0.08171295790913999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475027158436584,0.0,0.0,0.0912009953485451,0.06763511760010177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040537044994276863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054177085175016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038332230592994,0.0,0.0,0.08361856462615679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399488464106155,0.0,0.17648818917540193,0.0,0.0,0.07961606533965457,0.09446677467214463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310568354186245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898530660587015,0.0792083448164657,0.05752392254323569,0.0,0.08669046879557732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441467875571391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444290296224153,0.1063109047044742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892754699927994,0.0,0.08307173536508318,0.08397440731663285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703438246136029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458183547840761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745925353257715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09504676438411402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15949971652981054,0.08152181480757048,0.0,0.09676594697025327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048940383730072166,0.06586112616927521,0.3993418042549509,0.0,0.14920769602606795,0.07691799449640721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998425085391897,0.0,0.5436564164832068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,weckyweckyonmyleggy,2020/03/22,"TW? Meh I haven’t been this happy in a while, I struggle with my beliefs ranging from Christian-Atheist to Satanist and others probably. Last week I was so desperate and willing to die and cried so hard because people told me God doesn’t give hardships that people cannot handle, and yet there I was searching for pills to call the quits. With this extended break I finally managed to get myself together :) but the anxiety of returning back to that space that I desperately want to run from haunts me, what if I can’t handle it again? I already attempted and failed, what if it’s not pills that will be my death? 😷 I think I need a break from myself period.",3.63294744318182,5.681242820312505,4.527869318181818,83.32565340909092,73.921875,7.779545454545455,28.04261363636364,8.575989854853784,2.206615625,523,21,98,10,11,169,86,128,0.21899999999999997,0.723,0.057999999999999996,-0.9642,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,6,3,0,1,4,0,10,2,0,0,0,15,16,11,2,4,4,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,11,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,4,2,16,1,14,9,0,14,1,1,0,0,3,2,0,2,9,71,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514547608131876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17431614781561733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752141664821069,0.0,0.13890442609483025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326757039148563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502990695665685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23648795785377014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24961503614694966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905008948288365,0.2185889296058123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24256659435200975,0.204122337214901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18574043729410025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895905531328428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159458845396157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456770753541298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423625406223668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382140363539529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14600673017083388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21773483053420056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440071663823044,0.0,0.1827796071627784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,XBeauX,2020/03/22,Aspergers Can adults be diagnosed with Aspergers? I’m sure I’m not the only one but I’m looking for answers for myself. I don’t know how common of a thing it is for people to find out after childhood and into their adult years,1.5087234042553206,3.820397744680857,3.641957446808512,85.69400000000002,82.19148936170214,6.313191489361702,22.16595744680852,7.554174236665415,1.152424680851064,182,6,35,3,5,62,39,47,0.0,0.96,0.04,0.1655,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,1,1,11,9,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,9,8,0,6,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,4,25,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4097678921919037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689932976748864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218742735066616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33902360901607353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735715145426387,0.30704769474241017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798890182011045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3805018704320289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682140153615536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599828181269381
mentalhealth,KitKatFang,2020/03/22,"I feel like cancelling my therapy appointment The upcoming appointment would be my second one. I'm just feeling a lot of dread, shame, and embarrassment. Plus I don't know what I'm going to say. I don't want my therapist to think I'm wasting her time. Even though she's very nice I can't stop being shy. Idk what to do.",0.75,3.1522878636363667,2.8244696969697003,89.50670454545454,87.03030303030305,6.936363636363637,21.88636363636364,8.07648339933343,1.3566727272727277,253,9,54,6,8,85,48,66,0.233,0.608,0.159,-0.6294,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,3,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,11,16,3,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,3,0,2,0,3,9,2,5,13,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,32,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19690803486825975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30148081913857144,0.21297978518419908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694306917516839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638411076395069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564828655460066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534542924018077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20201648101368386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23708010384976005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492449429115137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409306797442471,0.3461448444167887,0.0,0.1910257676798364,0.2929052338477175,0.0,0.17383845288970298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24598345279207545,0.17584120980244194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21177867635906128,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lazyromcom,2020/03/22,"i have no talent, hobbies, anything like that. i don’t know what to do. since this whole covid-19 started, i’ve realized i have no hobbies or talents. i’m absolutely terrible at drawing and singing and anything athletic wise. i really am extremely unathletic. growing up my mom would never really let me do any type of activity or hobby unless it was softball or volleyball. she refused to let me partake in other sports, refused to let me do any other hobbies, nothing. i couldn’t do anything. i’ve noticed all i do now is lay in my bed on my phone. i have no idea where to start with hobbies and i have no money to go get a bunch of stuff to do anything. i hate writing and drawing and coloring. i recently moved from one house back into my old one, and i have nothing to do any type of activities here. i’m on self isolation right now and i feel stuck. i can’t go on a walk or run because i don’t have shoes for that, i have sandals and that’s it. i mean i could go on a walk but it’s always raining and cold right now. i don’t really know what to do anymore and i’m just lost and jealous of people who have hobbies and natural talent for things.",2.138679927667269,3.9557053755274296,4.246027727546714,84.72177215189873,77.52320675105486,7.214707655213985,29.00723327305606,8.11559375814309,2.091844846292948,902,42,183,16,21,310,118,237,0.10800000000000001,0.82,0.07200000000000001,-0.6494,0,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,2,0,3,0,29,1,1,0,2,35,45,18,0,3,7,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,14,14,0,2,6,2,1,8,10,4,0,2,3,3,26,5,26,36,3,29,0,1,1,0,8,12,0,4,10,132,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329909723154428,0.0,0.0,0.2532698271159387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12311909169885447,0.0,0.0,0.4086450548069973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546031530276353,0.0,0.07567801495843103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912017219219303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627717533780505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486096020106256,0.0,0.21166444275356885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225680934047466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14324737222979622,0.0,0.14014528889430966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13645436723066062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3808419090533782,0.0,0.060651276918142864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13551960450279804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352309698630638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453978444977079,0.0,0.13194714236298738,0.0,0.0,0.09574875204291816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382421326828382,0.1413406061298489,0.1302699399743805,0.0,0.16824856401446847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860669384282984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23859258074532916,0.0,0.12257881831226487,0.0,0.0,0.2120393547110221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951095216638228,0.0,0.0,0.1026945360644108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17574181131378674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421170282210014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08247683061699497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13860414626073025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818948337161506,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,enjdjwdhjwdjwjsjejb,2020/03/22,"Does anyone else want Armageddon? So. For as long as I can remember I’ve really really wanted to live in a dystopian future and I have absolutely no reason why. I remember reading the hunger games as a kid and just wishing to be in the hunger games. Don’t even get me started on the maze runner. I wanted to be stuck in that maze more than anything however for some reason I didn’t want them to escape, in my imaginary maze runner world we never escape. The thought of world war 3 too. I have no idea why I’m like this but I’m assuming it’s partially escapism since those books provided some much needed relief. Has anyone else felt similarly?",2.131147356580428,4.688500275590557,4.021872890888638,82.38498031496063,81.6771653543307,7.4080989876265475,22.457255343082114,8.418075326091056,1.760168053993251,513,17,95,12,14,173,84,127,0.085,0.81,0.10400000000000001,0.3109,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,1,0,4,3,1,0,6,0,8,2,0,2,1,22,21,7,1,6,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,2,0,8,6,0,2,5,1,0,0,4,1,10,2,16,15,4,13,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,3,5,58,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21907960826904305,0.3210318706223878,0.12891723102344965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370935829365846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617374361111932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347197038502597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504174667105753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184800273276159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768492472644154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653580618531011,0.0,0.1383330055927351,0.13863852422224146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151625889398044,0.1161608637261441,0.12082528680694575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15670166428206944,0.0,0.2007198797789863,0.3221436423699136,0.0,0.0,0.35492882815395155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295901670648083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088423766840602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436996141635588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696067855294667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827212488745823,0.0,0.18015042919680765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idkwhylexist,2020/03/22,"I feel like I'm going psychotic? I have so many depressive episodes, and my emotions are always fluctuating like crazy. I go through multiple emotions within a few minutes. I feel like I can never control my mind and emotions and I always feel overrun by my thoughts. Sometimes I feel drowned in my thoughts and I want to kms to escape them (not in the depressive way although I have wanted to during my depressive episodes). I'm also always suffocating in anxiety and stress. I also lack a lot of social norms? I have a lot of empathy for people but also my mind can be dangerously violent (I have a lot of thoughts I'm positive people my age don't have) and I don't see much wrong with many unethical acts. I'm also a maladaptive daydreamer and often feel like I'm living in multiple different realities. However, I'm very self aware of all this and although I lack many social normalities, I know enough to fit right into society even though I'm awkward at times. To others, I'm just a crackhead (not an actual crackhead) teenager that likes trendy stuff and normal teenage stuff. Under all that though, I feel like I'm suffocating in my brain and I often feel reality wavering beneath me. My emotions dictate strongly what I do so having such fluctuating emotions gives me multiple very distinct personalities. I've only been diagnosed with ADHD which is where a large part of these symptoms come from (and I don't want to be diagnosed with anything else, I'm already suffering from having my parents know I have ADHD). I don't know, sometimes I feel like these psycho feelings are only valid when I'm a teen so I want to end it when I'm an adult before I get labeled off as crazy. This is just a weirdass vent, whatever.",5.507037134927976,6.829732905775077,6.55890841813136,73.51608695652178,67.96656534954407,9.612316638033569,34.36513809964319,9.867487886160001,3.6251671996828327,1382,66,239,32,23,462,157,329,0.13,0.754,0.11599999999999999,-0.7,3,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,2,18,17,2,2,12,0,22,4,1,1,4,56,59,26,1,8,5,1,9,7,0,0,3,0,0,3,12,16,0,1,15,0,0,4,7,9,0,0,4,10,37,8,32,53,11,25,0,4,1,0,8,14,0,5,13,161,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.06941135250621404,0.0,0.1709657542944523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849229114994803,0.2275263884861411,0.17755433366660714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054413262179775886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585328610131148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06052528634490615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07940315486910647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06127107842443012,0.0,0.0,0.07977688725118606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18378913987152692,0.14438827013421998,0.0,0.07431435439568958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941890330796345,0.400051079248204,0.06299891766670344,0.07349496284719129,0.0,0.04697983670001565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3236832792200114,0.2540717938466142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0371618109551728,0.06823313207230032,0.080848160775057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727142297880595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432492359077743,0.0,0.06280794681676936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18141323602038004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21634001856461116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363942458393875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228777998728434,0.0,0.054858839764051925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938205139720794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081931657832136,0.0,0.0,0.07898000582090378,0.07702545259469526,0.0,0.09862337176163254,0.06210683883909916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060743522686075996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056680366260735776,0.0,0.07420274855802522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501350804786434,0.0,0.0,0.14069620964847046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147768757901798,0.0,0.16285069230823052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739299558509211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976717673255076,0.16940473219904595,0.04147571801427825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737725635024862,0.16781420478202191,0.056458652710532374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077768069434184,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DissonanceBadger,2020/03/22,"Hunger and emotional pain I have intermittent periods of what I can best describe as emotional pain attacks, meaning that I would suddenly start tormenting myself with thoughts about the problems in my and how much I suffer because of them. These aren’t depressive thoughts, nor anxious thoughts, they’re more along the lines of grief. Lately I noticed two things:

* This grief has a physiological aspect, a kind of charged feeling in chest and back.
* If I eat something nourishing (I’m not talking about comfort food or fun food, even a healthy meal will do), it makes a huge difference. The grieving thoughts seem to lift, and the physiological feeling described above is also gone.

This has got me thinking that maybe hunger is throwing me into these moods, and the reason for their frequency is that my obesity is basically messing with my blood sugar levels. However, I researched this a bit online and it seems like the connection is supposed to be the other way: stress and anxiety leading to obesity, not obesity leading to more emotional pain.

I would appreciate someone pointing me to information relevant for my theory. Is what I’m describing familiar to anyone? Does my theory have some merit?",7.486618819776716,9.477500660287085,7.289933014354067,67.61419776714514,63.92822966507178,10.740797448165871,39.77065390749601,10.793553405168565,5.0212083572567785,974,54,146,27,15,309,132,209,0.187,0.687,0.127,-0.9462,2,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,2,3,6,19,1,1,12,0,17,15,2,5,0,35,33,13,3,4,4,0,2,1,0,3,6,0,0,0,14,11,10,0,12,0,0,4,4,12,0,1,6,3,19,6,21,23,6,16,0,5,0,0,4,6,0,5,6,105,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406572740694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998381456464644,0.1328842631421803,0.0,0.08224705946614706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13381692264779116,0.0,0.09044738117149036,0.0,0.07170391427618514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12344156823508608,0.0,0.12841747894777347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013113789952856,0.0,0.0,0.12289447126584112,0.0,0.0,0.10293558727168607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036109310636026,0.0,0.39694134138684345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769107648654837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895080561132315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28446843154115353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940765152731932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248971379831727,0.0,0.0,0.13268761494114525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746627951682527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851648348593306,0.0,0.11817145075345628,0.12812954826937145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646888111261929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13391834750482795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754881004423872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119489471456072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255250461243706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12093944991037955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141651720832892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996644011314661,0.09055448957101456,0.0,0.0,0.08325651630864687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347405547207121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945435822194928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781457018340252,0.0753701977557446,0.0,0.3735286435185343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490382506616628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336629954824813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16711672892616902,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,For_A_Minute_There,2020/03/22,"One Year Free from Self-Harm I'm 18 and have a long way to go. The scars aren't great to wake up to every morning. I hate the fact that some fucking zombie mind-control disease made me do this to my body. I've decided to get a cover up tattoo that will help me to move on. It's going to be awesome. 

Last year on this day I made an attempt to end my life. It was the culmination of a six-month struggle with serious self-harm and suicidal thoughts. I was lucky enough to be rescued, hospitalized, and put on medication. 

So it's been exactly a year since waking up from this bad dream. I remember being so in the grips of depression... when you're in it, you're *in it.* You try to tolerate a hellish reality, one that becomes the *only* reality, until you can no longer.  I drift back into this nightmare-state from time to time, but I ask myself more and more: ""how could I ever have believed it was real?"". It's all very much like waking up relieved from a bad dream. 

I have love and hope in my heart for everyone struggling with any mental illness that makes you feel this way, and I'd like to wish you a peaceful rest of your sleep. I cannot wait for you to feel the sunlight on your face, to unclench your fists, and to open your eyes to a more beautiful, less frightening reality. It was just a dream, and everything is alright.",3.0535714285714306,4.437391944444447,4.414656084656084,86.3116666666667,74.0,7.661375661375662,26.56084656084657,8.269060116576782,1.6059735449735448,1035,37,220,17,21,343,153,270,0.115,0.7040000000000001,0.18100000000000002,0.9656,0,0,0,0,0,1,43.0,0,9,0,1,7,18,3,2,16,1,18,13,8,4,4,34,35,14,1,3,2,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,17,12,0,1,5,3,1,5,3,9,0,2,8,4,24,10,41,22,9,34,1,1,1,2,12,14,1,3,15,144,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834010967669359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465416984938025,0.0,0.0,0.09430450225312638,0.2048027077711847,0.0,0.135448991388034,0.0,0.13817608505796106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622815531494842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375539777006419,0.09792004637929724,0.0,0.0,0.07909425817118135,0.0,0.10563179436465296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862484128523657,0.12672247349988894,0.0,0.0,0.11093715092881178,0.10333158484547572,0.1171901520805026,0.11022315930466467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12402345286830803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133810030197088,0.06407563758847097,0.0,0.13940110334681882,0.0,0.0,0.13521377491084202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108406518446432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453319376249255,0.0822046738600409,0.0,0.0,0.12181166222377035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099969995799894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662601555484559,0.1198338484980138,0.0,0.0,0.1085347416829394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068963282225497,0.2320945731882664,0.08186481242356491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354940303344635,0.12359478110018812,0.0,0.12383395045197375,0.0,0.09789206306560856,0.13034955462695513,0.09015633938863724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662114464410154,0.09327513786447436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328957354212465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395940000916162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893003007506596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558857225988142,0.0,0.0,0.10145113261939577,0.0,0.12273105796218375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564251119541959,0.0,0.13415097512399068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736443539894377,0.14302764089781708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326619822554987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119289595574303,0.0,0.1946957953247892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410328074872093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23693322195623626
mentalhealth,Free_Thinker_Society,2020/03/22,"I’m dealing with a mix bag of a lot of things. Can someone please help? I was born in Brazil raised in Alaska. By the age of 9, I was in and out of foster care, foster families, and dealt with sexual abuse, and hurt people. I was officially adopted at the age of 10. In my youth, I’ve always cared more about making friends than education, knowledge, and being smart. I also was trying to learn English. I was so bad at math from K-12 grade that I remember crying in 5th grade cause math was too hard. I also went through a lot of therapy. 

I’ve always struggled with confidence, belonging, self esteem, and dealing with rejection. Now I’m 30 years old, I have a good job that makes about $37,000 a year, married, and I have handsome son. The issue is I feel like I had to work my ass off for this job and it wasn’t something that came easy for me. When I see people who smarter than me and have a higher IQ. I get jealous because I wish I had a higher IQ. 

My marriage has always been rocky due to dealing with my baggage from my childhood that I don’t know if I’ll fully recover from it. I might have some PTSD I have a hard time trying to retain, focus in the moment, and memorize long term things, and I worry about this littlest things like(Mistakes, regrets, Being Wrong).

Sometimes I feel like I’m too hard on myself, but I also feel like I can do better. Where do I go from here? How do i deal with life? How do I maintain what Ive gained? Can someone point me to someone who can help me? I’m curious if I can become smarter or have a higher IQ. I hate looking or feeling dumb.",2.6522507122507117,4.110269296296302,4.02,88.43653846153849,75.17283950617283,6.4660968660968665,24.80721747388414,7.010146845296331,0.932674169040836,1228,40,257,12,26,405,170,324,0.106,0.738,0.155,0.9342,2,0,1,0,1,0,47.0,0,0,0,3,15,19,3,1,13,0,32,2,1,5,0,44,53,22,0,4,5,1,7,3,1,1,1,0,0,1,14,18,0,1,9,0,0,3,2,9,0,0,12,9,38,10,41,38,5,31,0,3,2,1,12,13,2,8,18,168,52,8,0.0,0.11125294989435723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22526891793574724,0.23439023424054686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840032594019984,0.05723892440610659,0.10370219406432372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304453404994326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739350014364413,0.19146911674018646,0.0964583954181622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10314177830488044,0.0,0.3872159856441568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08851802065423763,0.0,0.1899091908485486,0.2012407561466032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254482340153176,0.0,0.04905746536686218,0.0,0.053364001178268484,0.07875660285732776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25234062062496865,0.09270414712712166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587476590662172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10051900492782537,0.0,0.0,0.09800438908201793,0.18635716933887947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05160350212072226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06632244200587925,0.18349391730522166,0.0,0.0,0.08309615840904486,0.07885008590827272,0.0,0.0,0.1596562584798967,0.0,0.0,0.12535435779904938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961020005103484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852942430740784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019313430111507,0.0,0.0,0.10307104190014132,0.08876330165737703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976092246723176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636734015192977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482399359308024,0.0,0.09795536530505387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386766404566517,0.07228673128253989,0.09286683364818443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816184842107717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737974925017717,0.0,0.18714358756111227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054752272501078815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750021035811496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870437406290955,0.0,0.0,0.10797726451558533,0.0,0.0,0.06835835492003997,0.09535726911431043,0.0,0.0,0.10266196062181317,0.0,0.12093356921943448
mentalhealth,TheJokingJoker123,2020/03/22,"Friend is suicidal and her mom minimizes it. Not sure if this is the right place to post. I'm not in the right place mentally to write everything down but to make a very long story short, my friend is suicidal and her mom minimizes it whenever she goes to get help for it. I think she has borderline personality disorder or something due to the change in perspective she has when she's particularly low. She'll only see things from her mom's point of view, meaning that she just calls the mental hospital a ""vacation"" and insists that she's just lazy and incompetent for feeling this way and she should stop taking her meds, something her mom has tried to get her to do more than once (anti depressants). I'm just at a loss for what to do. Her mom minimizes it when it's brought up and she doesn't speak up when she's like that. Or when she does she's uncooperative when asked about suicidal tendencies. It's been cycles for months of her going to the hospital for suicidal tendencies and nothing happening because of her mom. And when she finally got therapy and a psychiatrist she was guilted constantly and anyone they saw to diagnose her never got nearly the full story, just her mom's watered down version that paints her as just a stressed teen. I was planning on calling 911 and telling them about her suicidal thoughts and that her mom is part of the problem & that she minimizes these things when they're brought up. But I'm not sure it'd work. 
She's 18 btw.",7.622969483568077,7.087558080985918,7.541183098591549,74.7183708920188,63.2605633802817,11.939530516431926,36.1868544600939,11.34169021259432,4.0038575586854455,1181,49,229,31,15,379,139,284,0.185,0.767,0.048,-0.9932,0,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,3,14,11,0,2,12,0,16,2,0,1,3,37,36,25,5,3,13,8,1,1,2,2,1,1,0,1,19,12,1,1,4,0,0,3,5,6,0,0,9,5,35,5,34,24,4,37,0,3,3,0,50,18,0,3,15,150,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056965012261584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051994641833446466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951709811286523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04532951530481077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186091873653604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866362671036789,0.0,0.0,0.08035736267919774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640466528372433,0.07547441664007551,0.0,0.0,0.08522365932046255,0.0,0.06507343881770893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683048850083988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037598940154853384,0.0,0.0,0.08145837335384352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490158897233575,0.0,0.077700660878427,0.0,0.04226082745674711,0.0,0.11894588690023065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06575680940560984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04984232484149325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0363288200255705,0.0,0.0,0.06580676739571863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04963626010913054,0.0,0.0,0.08100046389244299,0.08259783356510084,0.0,0.1498759362222415,0.0,0.0,0.6967216379621582,0.059353900181236936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05735145832683417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135097561444659,0.0,0.0,0.07919158371717505,0.0,0.056554566824162864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08052525451850577,0.0,0.0,0.06492878440032314,0.15538194455227314,0.0,0.0702947772469733,0.0,0.07121687407771023,0.0,0.0,0.071153026050612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700704662873394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05925574943862402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449280453834156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621687689399732,0.0851797854977041,0.0,0.0,0.40669199000272616,0.0,0.14016792066209813,0.0,0.0559098968476603,0.0,0.06499441865494003,0.0,0.08503779617744454,0.0,0.09880372147178924,0.04764725283387146,0.0,0.0590339890579103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05048594812674512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061355260656648286,0.0,0.0590239619001038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054135383005713085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PITNOL,2020/03/22,"Lack of support over the past week or so starting to take it's toll... Last year was the worst ever. I had 16 hospital admissions. I was on life support 6 times after suicide attempts.
Then I finally started to get my feet under me. I got a therapist that I like and trust. I got a new med prescriber who is willing to give me the meds I need and want, knowing that I now myself best. The pharmacist delivers my meds to my apartment weekly. I got into their Intensive Out Patient program and got a case manager that I really clicked with.

In October I was sexually assaulted by a stranger in the parking lot of my apt, and that set me back a little but I already had so much support, it didn't send me completely off the rails. And I got moved into a lovely new apartment in a really sweet neighborhood.

So now, I haven't seen or talked to my therapist for 3 weeks. I saw my IOP case manager once last week, and from now on we're on phone calls only. I have a counselor from my local sexual assault services, she usually comes over once a week but again, now it's phone calls only.

I understand why we need to take these precautions, obviously I don't disagree with any of that. But I can feel myself slipping. I don't know if even 3 or 4 phone calls per week with different clinicians will be enough. And I know I can't go to the hospital if I feel suicidal. I cant stop thinking about suicide and self-harm, which is normal for me but not to the degree of the last few days.

I'm not sure what I'm looking for here but I needed to say this somewhere that people aren't going to freak out because I used the word suicide. I'm not actively suicidal, I'm just having more thoughts than I had been.

I've worked really hard for the last 6 months since my last suicide attempt. Is coronavirus going to be the thing that finally pushes me over the edge?",4.0733772110242725,5.001426144385025,5.4167914438502685,81.84744960921431,70.97860962566845,9.06935417523653,30.1600164541341,9.367010060515213,2.6182627725215966,1454,59,293,31,26,488,194,374,0.139,0.774,0.087,-0.9794,1,0,0,0,0,4,36.0,1,0,1,4,15,13,2,0,22,0,24,3,1,1,3,52,63,22,6,8,14,0,3,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,16,17,0,1,8,0,0,7,10,4,0,0,16,9,46,9,43,43,8,60,0,0,4,1,15,19,0,6,34,194,62,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746923328791848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04773950888164799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053980712453620204,0.0,0.042794255933214696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367226904102436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215051108939656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06047247951008074,0.07360506287512887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045274237232182574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334575119386788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253703948352297,0.0,0.046367507889266586,0.06350138436273359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709920967380675,0.0,0.0,0.15380488645276896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03667744895849829,0.06734379069629037,0.1196915952424618,0.0,0.28073324256742394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628868624711559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574292317949868,0.2861184497204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049585480278741705,0.03429696548643582,0.0703604658164935,0.0,0.0,0.05895168002763159,0.0,0.0,0.05968290684720886,0.06335970285848001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339345218239425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603426328100985,0.07461321208067617,0.051606268164653614,0.15616083501272904,0.0,0.1356023240020336,0.0,0.0,0.06878268233507981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952486822596678,0.0,0.10678299075518527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670153897204784,0.048668964064556286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491886606420966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582714587038855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323560001153333,0.0,0.0,0.0580715054655849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937813585173927,0.0,0.0,0.05869169769807245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4607350682433081,0.2389918991748945,0.06616419600016944,0.0,0.105565763004948,0.056425402925146376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16301898310104498,0.046638836918790866,0.04498236344633681,0.0,0.0557322446427018,0.04093512913890998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308236216032188,0.0,0.06063165979288904,0.07731716636399279,0.0,0.041406734307352366,0.0,0.3378690301613433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334604284076041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05110761542034888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04520754159682888
mentalhealth,JasonJdDean,2020/03/22,"Mental illness in childhood I was diagnosed with Depression and Anxiety when I was 8. I was symptomatic of depression at least three years prior. My illnesses were the direct result of neglect and abuse, and so I never received any treatment. I wasn't even told of the diagnoses until I was 16 -- they were mentioned off-hand.

I feel like I struggle to relate to people who haven't been mentally ill for literally their entire lives. This is the only reality I've ever known. I need to be reminded, sometimes, that my reality isn't most's. 

Blegh.",4.369607843137256,6.722034392156862,5.951568627450977,72.57872549019609,72.72549019607844,9.239215686274509,30.94117647058824,9.725611199111238,3.5633647058823525,436,20,71,12,9,148,74,102,0.228,0.727,0.045,-0.9621,0,0,0,0,1,0,14.0,0,0,2,0,4,5,0,1,3,0,12,5,0,1,2,12,15,6,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,9,1,13,1,11,5,2,10,0,3,0,0,6,2,0,1,8,53,16,0,0.0,0.25122227802504016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14418847401668392,0.0,0.16220327319751746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3652442912026955,0.4304143712192756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400445954122499,0.1917943423320235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720933599551304,0.15147511815383471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358772498376287,0.0,0.18722741751517505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4273551205942238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572184341588564,0.16353151818298126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612592677283144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14699572376914136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20970425974522994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216610274056425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20260487995128784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136541128922219
mentalhealth,Indipod,2020/03/22,"Feeling really off/low and can’t explain why I feel so much emotional pain and I don’t normally feel this way.  I can’t help but think that it’s the result of so many people in the world suffering and experiencing pain in their lives right now due to COVID. I have this overwhelming feeling of sadness and I just feel like crying, and I don’t really have any reason to, so I can’t help but think this is an overwhelming emotion I’m picking up from the thousands suffering out in the world right now.  Trying to send out love and peace to counteract this horrible feeling in me.",8.99191304347826,6.5344548000000025,8.976521739130437,71.67086956521742,61.8695652173913,13.026086956521738,37.78260869565217,11.602472056035307,4.151208695652175,462,17,91,11,5,152,65,115,0.21,0.606,0.183,-0.8283,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,6,9,0,2,5,0,8,3,0,3,0,24,19,11,0,1,3,0,6,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,10,0,0,1,5,7,0,1,0,7,9,2,14,19,1,16,0,5,0,1,6,11,0,0,4,58,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213699850887772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18113384701460175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3709784394080821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.500267440902754,0.117803903636453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22105669463379785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056133918650234,0.0,0.14560886909927964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882781728187405,0.0,0.0,0.1671817396823401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121976433764975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156604303507022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35092839922326874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432022822576166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21127708875499535,0.16954367199648754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28164574999494985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21132128674439515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119556205879551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308891786581164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487957307895213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,etherealpussy,2020/03/22,It never ends I’m having an episode where my mood keeps instantly changing from happy to upset to giggly to angry with no real trigger. Got into a fight with bf in the midst of this and now I’m nauseas from crying and trying not to hurt myself again tonight. Any distractions would be welcome..,3.7710526315789465,5.948466807017546,4.796350877192981,80.97978947368422,73.91228070175438,6.665263157894738,25.43508771929825,7.554174236665415,1.5751150877192988,236,8,40,3,5,77,49,57,0.228,0.65,0.122,-0.7449,0,0,0,0,1,2,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,2,3,0,3,0,0,1,1,11,7,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,2,2,11,4,0,8,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,29,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21358243176366976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322507344455921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34499770846839983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781780893898413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511952469938385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343397134769243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33622482496971473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791651557211908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422347525467569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3574872172545017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132369691783141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231105599389328,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoseDurden,2020/03/22,"I feel like I’m free falling into a giant black hole or something. I know I’m not alone in this I’m just writing cause I need to get it out. I really felt like I was getting handle on my depression for the first time in about 2-3 years and then all this COVID19 happened and I can feel it coming back. I can feel myself sinking back. It’s just frustrating because, all jokes aside, I really did feel like I was moving forward with my life in a way I hadn’t been/felt for years and now I feel stuck, I feel like I’m free falling into a giant black hole or something. 

Everyone is self isolating and everyone is feeling hit by this in there own way, I understand that (were all in this together - separately). I’m just feeling very alone right now. I am still required to go into work at this time and part of me is grateful for that as it means I get to talk to someone at least. But For safety reason I am also hoping they will set us up to worn from home to help prevent the spread. 

All my friends have an SO/kids that they are going through this with, my parents have each other. I guess I’m just feeling very lonely right now. Weekend have always be difficult for me so I’ll figure something out. Thanks for letting me get this out.",2.869921259842521,4.277739968503937,4.043314960629922,88.69410629921259,74.51181102362204,6.812283464566928,25.692125984251966,7.365786028017652,1.1452116535433068,968,33,204,11,20,316,136,254,0.07400000000000001,0.752,0.17300000000000001,0.9669,1,4,3,0,0,0,24.0,1,0,2,3,14,14,1,0,6,0,19,1,0,2,4,49,53,12,0,2,8,1,10,4,1,1,1,0,1,1,15,15,0,2,15,2,2,7,2,4,0,1,8,12,28,12,35,41,8,42,0,2,2,0,9,20,0,4,18,135,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21583493056755426,0.0,0.08332691899791897,0.08670089172282558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602433067220322,0.0,0.06351799344385434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703981235401916,0.0,0.08975715252648354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974538659108695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19913086900381813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4741697095972592,0.22331672305485406,0.20009239912360235,0.0,0.0,0.0886305699054602,0.0,0.0,0.08050293860365529,0.0,0.21775613681601794,0.0,0.11843598782291145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147855909803847,0.0,0.09214174386442277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984156881493139,0.0,0.1045188590449286,0.10349189638714787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057264369367399766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654927940734564,0.07359796642266071,0.20362306869513389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350191811831095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074573940861343,0.0,0.07726132614624033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569929257492673,0.11283603087695765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350351915597955,0.10713266164134903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17796865245172966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870099876602464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828643235947667,0.2406496018918297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08321247369431796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375022055902949,0.0,0.09593130717478274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215171152094054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847355326857776,0.12533708773866462,0.0,0.0,0.1719481453939729,0.0,0.16541467958750558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585721752627028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419989520282533
mentalhealth,Meiosis_I,2020/03/22,"Sensitivity, concentration, memory issues From since I can remember, I’ve had a hard time with these issues. Wondering what I could do to get help. I can’t focus, I can’t even remember what I ate yesterday. I take in information and misconstrue it all. I easily am hurt and blow up easily. 

I’m in school so I don’t have time to get help. I graduate in May though.",1.0139117199391166,3.50703182191781,4.384292237442923,78.07619482496195,86.94520547945206,9.81978691019787,20.439878234398783,9.725611199111238,2.6629585996955862,285,9,58,12,9,104,48,73,0.07200000000000001,0.7759999999999999,0.152,0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,10,1,0,0,1,10,16,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,4,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,1,9,0,8,12,1,7,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,2,3,38,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17349975060142706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352739873243822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22706498929064184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19466191296036814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913088982360653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326286795165355,0.0,0.0,0.4536183308886606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4923266779450579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199234886103869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17975630995431108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633857419670879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21350030900164127,0.0,0.2534236955807683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23565717485564744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigdaddypaddy69,2020/03/22,"All the vices I use to escape my sad feelings are disappearing Due to covid-19 all the things I use like sports and being around freinds have stopped and I've started feeling like a physical feeling off sadness in my stomach and everything was less fun ,it was my birthday recently and I didn't feel an ounce of joy.
 I just want it to stop.",6.1364925373134325,6.39099007462687,5.912649253731345,82.5053917910448,66.16417910447761,9.088059701492536,37.6455223880597,8.841846274778883,3.1554507462686576,273,14,54,4,4,85,49,67,0.133,0.632,0.235,0.6915,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,4,0,6,1,1,2,2,17,14,4,0,1,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,4,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,4,7,4,7,10,3,9,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,7,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283293163514856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305154996106129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5187535610796344,0.183235574186722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506148402118348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532516422213559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18154401769803533,0.0,0.0,0.4288720658444559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703996912888876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4430477599186666,0.0,0.0,0.1512836770680935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snartblartmcgee,2020/03/22,"help me please I'm feeling suicidal again for the first time in a long time, please help me, I don't know what to do",8.055,3.640702192307693,7.711538461538463,86.08346153846158,65.53846153846155,11.93846153846154,33.69230769230769,8.841846274778883,2.1956615384615383,91,2,24,1,1,29,20,26,0.141,0.5,0.359,0.6124,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,3,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,13,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083158260830354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537374271313922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3998940771073394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16394020443606086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26398985800538605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6548969347474377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262964127903129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3478871928562874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mayallurbaconburn,2020/03/22,Is it possibly lessen and lesson your emotions till you just can feel anything? And If so what do you do then. It is like I can hardly feel anything. How can I fix those,0.7084285714285734,2.993230628571432,1.9825000000000017,96.43375000000002,85.57142857142857,4.642857142857143,20.17857142857143,5.985473137389443,-0.08628571428571474,132,4,29,1,4,42,25,35,0.0,0.9279999999999999,0.07200000000000001,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,3,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,1,0,8,9,7,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,1,9,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,24,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6087826041159298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160810416383741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3740591110734091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3313524315382356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18071155821338547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4169999855871855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nabil-xel-sahara,2020/03/22,"My dad called me a ""stupid piece of shit"" today. Title says it all. 

Ive had a fight with my father today because he screamed at my mom for no apparent reason (he is a depressed & frustrated man who has achieved nothing noteworthy in his life). He's under the impression that I (21 m) am not worth of telling him that he shouldn't talk to mom in that way -- especially when we didnt do anything. Everytime I defend my mother, he gets more worked up because in his opinion, I should just sit there and be silent while he berates her.

She tried to de-escalate the situation, but he just covered his ears and made loud ""lalala"" noises in order not to hear her. I told him that he should stop acting in such a childish manner -- which made him boil. He started screaming at me and called me a stupid piece of shit numerous times. 

I am very insecure and dont really like myself in general, so hearing what I have always told myself by my own dad only confirms my self-picture. Not fishing for attention, thats my genuine feelings.

This wasnt an isolated case either, he likes calling me a worthless piece of shit every time he gets angry.",6.746206636500753,6.271684823529411,7.023269230769234,77.51131410256413,65.01809954751131,9.900603318250377,34.25377073906486,9.2995712137729,2.9835426847662148,890,35,169,14,12,289,143,221,0.223,0.746,0.031,-0.9925,1,0,0,0,1,0,33.0,1,0,0,2,6,15,7,1,9,0,15,6,4,3,1,25,25,8,0,3,7,6,1,2,0,3,1,7,0,1,10,6,1,1,3,0,1,1,8,12,0,0,7,8,30,3,21,14,7,22,0,2,0,0,40,10,3,1,10,107,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555391174543514,0.13744784682545805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439124156530988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465983200388767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886008490574365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926042890169743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867366399306825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688120321362968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414193631645458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325534927655977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28595066453527795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896017687713795,0.12395034811805955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24006742254860397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29714318241691234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172124307573005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647929991377373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126686126681064,0.13042854908685342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088055994063198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13233791951148904,0.0,0.3906459455221525,0.0,0.1425908613241158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978895333333903,0.0,0.0,0.10605685165052202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196162016198956,0.11087727061242762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14794088733687866,0.0,0.2404883021192775,0.24243167232716226,0.0,0.0861265359152287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466904666753504,0.0,0.1006919660434259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235229171136902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hakeemthedtream,2020/03/22,"Anyone use this app for habit/goal tracking? Wondering if anyone else uses this app called MoodLyft? There are many habits/goals app I've used but this is the easiest I've found so far. Its not fancy as the others but it has really helped me achieve the small daily goals I set for myself like ""making my bed"", ""eat breakfast"", ""open the window"", ""telling myself i'm awesome""  etc. 

I especially like when other people in the same boat as me reach out/nudge me to give me extra motivation to complete tasks. 

Just another resource for anyone who struggles finding energy to wake up in the mornings, tracking small goals. Share what else you guys use to keep track of your habits/goals...perhaps there is a better one.",5.193233082706769,6.908693473684213,5.123315789473687,82.01971052631583,69.15037593984961,7.4252631578947375,26.833834586466175,7.908726449838941,1.6638727819548882,564,18,100,7,10,175,94,133,0.022000000000000002,0.772,0.205,0.9788,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,2,0,5,5,5,0,1,7,0,4,3,1,6,0,17,14,7,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,9,1,2,1,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,11,4,13,13,3,9,0,0,0,0,9,7,0,2,3,57,20,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16627107177222092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33262069280103385,0.16247038243513126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023941192906214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16191438905491007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16625422922304786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16225337997972453,0.2649243594421541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17684385073868136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492714441093027,0.0,0.0,0.17386026601074125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15211168332488725,0.18023428583322312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700602055130805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628395564744003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14094142048315522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15493541718211265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058445424590587,0.1607618048835423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744893916683283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099302247912502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015819257035201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657684043137936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859433587058656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5478030706926792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719588853757697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,illegallyadoptme,2020/03/22,Im in a tough situation and my mental health is horrible Im a closeted transgirl and my parents are very much transphobic. I know how they talk about my trans half-brother and its horrible. Im scared and i need out. My other posts may explain more,-0.27839999999999776,1.5659499600000046,2.1720000000000006,88.39600000000004,109.4,6.0,23.0,7.1686216300943375,1.6799999999999995,198,9,39,5,10,67,36,50,0.231,0.769,0.0,-0.8859999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,10,6,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,0,3,5,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,24,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389929036671877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7285927681844295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12356540717782845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265844127285932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652822314364131,0.1667149630708085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24965664260587125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153332148709471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251026486306668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527279917457554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18071673920329293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855153809759267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Busterx8,2020/03/22,"I obsess with a certain type of conquering. What exactly is wrong with me?  I’m 22, and I obsess with a certain type of conquering.

* When I started watching a few TV series, I wanted to know about every one of them, so I’ve completed over 100 series and 1500 movies.
* When I got the time to play games, I wanted to know them all, so I’ve completed over 100 game campaigns.
* When I got the opportunity to do educational courses, I wanted to learn about everything, so I completed over 25 online courses, which did not even help my career directly, though I expected them to, at the time.

These are some of the things I completed, while there are a ton more things I tried to know all about, and never reached a benchmark of completion.

I binged all the movies, series, games and courses, because I could never continue any of them after a short gap, as I couldn’t remember the context, and felt the experience got diminished.

But after I got to the end of each of this, I did not remember the 1st TV series I watched or the 50th game I played or the 25th course content, so I wonder what was the point of doing all that, when I am not going to remember any of it. It makes no difference for me to have watched/played/learnt it, when I remember nothing about it later.

Though I feel the need to experience everything, I do not want to master each thing much, as I mostly get bored if I ever forget the context. I tend to move onto the next new thing if I was forced to take an unintentional gap from something I was doing, instead of continuing it, as I find it extremely hard to recollect the context.

I have now learnt that it is counterproductive to want to know everything and I should instead focus on mastering a particular thing, but I have this huge hunger, and I want to understand why I am like this, and how I can handle this desire. It hurts that all this time I’ve had a completely wrong approach to life, but I now want to understand and fix my approach.

What is wrong with me? Can you folks please link me to any resources that would explain why I’m like this, or link me to others who are similar? Thank You.",6.465787323205865,6.121327983132532,7.057077003666843,76.60424305919332,65.55421686746989,10.590885280251443,32.50130958617077,10.176274734539398,3.0644960712414884,1663,60,328,35,23,549,181,415,0.091,0.8370000000000001,0.07200000000000001,0.1664,0,0,1,0,0,0,52.0,0,2,4,5,23,15,0,2,25,0,27,2,0,2,11,76,58,33,0,16,12,0,3,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,30,15,1,0,19,8,0,4,8,7,0,1,11,5,50,8,54,43,13,36,0,1,2,0,13,9,0,8,25,244,80,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563165321152394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04670799119806674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4820195449973434,0.0,0.0,0.0611763420703734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800535638830869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786424939041523,0.0,0.0,0.05060803379191888,0.06930888356858986,0.06455724455740401,0.0,0.2065884345554725,0.1499018163441856,0.0,0.0,0.03874232834832782,0.0,0.07356902753332753,0.0,0.0700310166877011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040031773558456406,0.0,0.043545984191524584,0.0,0.24512609062875165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863816077000623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05135803580367378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202531487307961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843754126078367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541203048377759,0.07486716743297775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051145704618557226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143694000808194,0.05632590324648839,0.05681415841291373,0.11819104584344706,0.07400189602325202,0.08148824618816777,0.0,0.0,0.0735207671770396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05192097368959642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841078229159344,0.07243244969295393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3471906461644181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05898727209698716,0.0,0.0,0.05423336606070804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05761012338837401,0.0,0.0,0.07054313916732081,0.0,0.0,0.25452088566402525,0.0,0.1505612300921359,0.0,0.13403651563629165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05202123174874987,0.0,0.0,0.15953217337604572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163550195172779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827867067281588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309316809005432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05442999020714337,0.25132201571846885,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Adifficultdog,2020/03/22,"Celebrating victory. Basically just a massive shoutout to all you damaged, disturbed boys and girls out there. You fight in wars no one knows about. Salute to your daily  struggle in your mind, you may not believe it, but you are loved. I love you.",2.7300000000000004,5.733579666666671,2.806111111111111,88.30250000000002,85.66666666666666,5.666666666666668,27.5,7.1686216300943375,1.6469999999999998,195,9,36,3,6,59,38,45,0.18899999999999997,0.58,0.23,0.8126,0,0,0,0,1,0,8.0,0,7,0,0,3,7,2,2,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,9,5,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,8,2,6,4,1,3,0,1,0,2,12,3,0,1,0,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41413135992652456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20200970839087806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6635019099176171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3711461522754661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24907845782828025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842693917994462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samiraawad,2020/03/22,"Are these voices okay ? My uncle passed away a little over a year ago , but I still remember him and dream of him , I sometimes even hear him like saying things from an old conversation we had or the way he used to call my name or my moms . It’s not like it’s a daily thing but it happens often , is it normal?",3.868384615384617,3.817281646153848,5.089038461538461,87.51971153846155,71.0,7.730769230769233,22.403846153846153,7.1686216300943375,0.5189230769230759,237,4,54,2,4,79,51,65,0.0,0.833,0.16699999999999998,0.8693,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,1,3,0,0,1,0,12,6,5,0,1,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,7,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,9,3,5,5,0,9,0,0,0,0,11,3,0,3,6,38,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108214795133088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223448620349412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428504845993675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570841250169942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103118190344336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680511029080619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323829362165031,0.2383676136955057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785430063535955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330223892284925,0.0,0.0,0.2495620264751475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.269414432751244,0.0,0.0,0.18913154405859525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352194317634804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18993092571329315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3160066703043346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054083055237647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18877796696703653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315438416199853
mentalhealth,Midelication,2020/03/22,"Where has my creativity gone and why can't comprehend life I used to? Hi, my name is Finlay, I'm 17, and I've been suffering from this weird phenomenon where I feel my creativity has been drowned and that I'm viewing life in it's most basic form. The only way I can describe this feeling is that my frontal part of my brain/head has been cut right through with glass. This glass obstructs my view of things, and I have to force myself to think creatively or comprehend life in a more sophisticated and detailed view. It feels like I have lost the ability to understand things on a higher level like I used to. I remember I used to analyse things in high detail and produce creative works with music, songs and especially literature. But now it feels like it all has been drowned away, and there's this thing in my brain obstructing me from possessing it again. It feels weird, it actually feels like it is physically there and that it is impossible for me to remove it. I think about it everyday, and it's most annoying when I'm trying to do something creative, as if it is blocking my creative flare. What could this be? I suspected this might be the case of a ""placebo effect"" or could it be a concrete delusion I've made. I've wondered if it could be from trauma of the brain (if it happened in recent events)?

Please, if anyone has any advice or help on this certain situation, it would be very much appreciated, it feels utterly inescapable, and I really want it to go...

Thanks

Finlay AKA Midelication",7.162291666666667,7.014005090277783,7.409166666666668,74.0025,64.06944444444444,10.95,34.66666666666667,10.550175099000144,3.5329333333333337,1198,48,227,27,16,390,146,288,0.09300000000000001,0.746,0.161,0.958,0,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,4,8,13,2,0,8,0,29,5,2,6,2,52,53,21,2,9,8,0,7,4,0,2,3,1,0,0,34,13,0,1,14,1,0,3,1,7,0,0,7,11,22,6,30,36,7,23,0,2,3,0,3,13,0,11,10,156,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.1062822737281522,0.0,0.0,0.10642741819875322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406380588324445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615371135410402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232628638358138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647449964292969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26087179623241097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854837949382215,0.2334199836067828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618971252083224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631040635076367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177499899512766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300133024005043,0.11507136961082312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23078302261739114,0.21283535199066167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188901709559896,0.0,0.0,0.10305504412733983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155382821462002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006275550888366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828323843729843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794094108699757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955252689041893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977173233278648,0.0,0.10753733172551774,0.0,0.12337591683701107,0.09301014131306236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242150434165686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384567795335819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027141649671592,0.0,0.0,0.28942482611097864,0.13957265638062566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394401010392672,0.0,0.0,0.11338109694320338,0.0,0.2821946592964888,0.0,0.08986369836086815,0.06423904233287453,0.08644917243423955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827602190171104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811027640586218,0.07928913799746576,0.0,0.0,0.07736786712918158,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ManyMilesYetToGo,2020/03/22,Can I say I have depression? A psychiatrist said I have depressive thoughts and I'm on antidepressants but I've never been officially diagnosed with depression and I don't want to say I have something I don't so I don't know if that's enough for me to say I have depression or not?,1.918505747126435,4.252339931034484,4.25241379310345,81.79229885057472,80.72413793103449,9.383908045977012,26.90804597701149,9.725611199111238,2.9402321839080465,228,10,48,8,6,79,36,58,0.29600000000000004,0.7040000000000001,0.0,-0.9427,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,9,1,0,0,1,11,14,6,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,4,9,0,5,11,1,2,0,4,0,0,4,1,0,2,1,34,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7178830643269438,0.21149350940147424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21530429863082892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451597268594768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16070957194247518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982097844830721,0.4971180753350979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041518511170216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542433947341326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290338773286533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,selle2520,2020/03/22,Mental Health Rights So I live in California and I am still considered a minor until another year and I want to know if someone can please educate me on my Mental health rights . My mother and I do not get along and she is discussing things from my mental health plan to what goes on in my team meetings to my diagnosis to family/friends that I do not want these family/friends knowing for specific reasons. Can she discuss these things without my consent even though she is my parent and I am still a minor?,6.297585034013608,6.807111071428572,6.6738775510204125,76.30564625850344,65.83673469387756,9.798639455782316,32.65986394557823,9.725611199111238,3.0838925170068032,407,16,74,8,6,132,58,98,0.018000000000000002,0.9279999999999999,0.054000000000000006,0.3036,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,2,0,8,3,0,1,0,15,13,9,0,3,4,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,17,0,13,13,0,10,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,1,4,59,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644838343292522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036060922354676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423829003448497,0.0,0.08195409528652878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5002119776420101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17241487297780322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851231481646215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4742410149200759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17417705855575272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218773791097464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612806047872304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679191523932527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290894660221575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505409251977604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20842472927822514,0.0,0.15411644676958544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850429375700876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15120969237780565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010142001939254
mentalhealth,ritzbitz00,2020/03/22,"Can you identify this mental health symptom ""Toxic Zen""? I used to have a boss with an issue I nicknamed ""Toxic Zen"". That was focusing on (or achieving) your mental and physiological wellbeing at the expense of those around you. I've begun to notice the issue with a friend of mine as well, and I was curious if people could identify what this is actually a symptom of, or what the diagnostic name for this phenomenon is. Details below:

My boss had anxiety, and developed a lot of strategies to cope and maintain a healthy state of mind. However, he spent so much time on de-stressing, meditation and self-care that he wasn't actually able to do his work, or take care of himself outside of that lens. He would transfer any and all responsibilities (professional and personal) to others so that he could avoid stressful triggers and concentrate on maintaining his state of calm. Sometimes it was normal PA stuff, but it was often things that went beyond what would be considered acceptable. You would never guess anything was out of place when you met him, he was happy, breezy, and relaxed. But you'd never see him actually doing anything besides relaxing, and if he was presented with something unexpected he'd need to take care of, he'd panic and begin trying to arrange for someone else to deal with it while he was trying to come down.",9.429781420765023,8.57687186885246,9.362950819672132,64.15076502732244,59.819672131147534,12.23169398907104,40.005464480874316,11.374738998889045,4.7135038251366135,1072,48,175,25,12,352,143,244,0.037000000000000005,0.838,0.125,0.9692,1,1,1,1,0,0,33.0,0,6,0,2,7,12,0,3,9,0,25,3,0,4,3,46,38,23,0,9,7,1,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,18,18,0,1,1,2,2,2,3,3,1,0,13,1,18,9,35,16,3,22,2,0,1,0,26,10,0,8,8,131,36,6,0.1160382912875356,0.0,0.3397099007156417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891001719808287,0.0,0.08876897522419458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909792532529176,0.10329868079229104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23661754302871624,0.0,0.0,0.0999567132117187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18529426694279907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963038309317707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969351026624139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965089600332292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12782926012585555,0.0,0.0,0.1235249187988405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334327744352155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24222765681929195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865160568409796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338786102409057,0.0,0.11716559540192722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530149563325623,0.08604092267385753,0.1789917675493883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369288819973415,0.0,0.1321103637274755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13614593297937144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044634059533375,0.10132016014673252,0.12123531690413625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246749462794752,0.0,0.1210532448238818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831886764944088,0.08933194575113265,0.11476483717479807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26584294123482005,0.0,0.13283608160627086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412164298318951,0.17449270780939016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709068462526936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766286080498159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756476566149874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021982691247207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433235950605008,0.10756865856143896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447725806670506,0.0,0.0,0.2472908184883275,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oh_no77,2020/03/22,"Is this something I should be concerned about? occasionally i start to feel like im detaching from reality or feeling distanced from whatever i’m doing. once that happens i become paranoid that i’m hallucinating the situation i’m in and start to internally freak out, despite the fact that i know i’m not hallucinating.

for example, sometimes when i’m out with my friends the detachment will happen and i’ll start to think “are they actually with me or am i imagining them?, what if i’m hallucinating and i’m alone? i know i’m not, but what if i am?”

sometimes it may happen when i walk into a bathroom. i’ll feel weird and think “did i just walk into the bathroom, or am i out in public imagining that i walked into the bathroom? what if i try to use the toilet that’s in front of me, but i’m actually out in public?”

is this a symptom of a disorder, or is this something i shouldn’t be too concerned with?",4.177087912087909,5.314460994505499,6.2084615384615445,75.48653846153847,70.92307692307692,9.116483516483518,31.582417582417587,9.466822959209583,2.9139868131868134,719,32,141,16,13,252,84,182,0.07200000000000001,0.897,0.031,-0.755,0,1,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,0,5,4,0,0,9,0,15,1,0,1,1,40,38,15,0,5,12,0,3,1,1,4,1,0,0,0,12,14,0,0,9,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,1,3,18,2,24,31,0,20,0,0,0,0,5,11,0,8,6,97,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.3183139445815045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16891699859813394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18012536369157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18692074036843384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473968538848991,0.1165149388192289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600661747847314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4326725088913681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617034264859144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792652445036659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967986812625365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17369061100394476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833253588847175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25111664955258145,0.32260980274704737,0.0,0.34631796051014424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695179176024296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20900909083801292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073064542521599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14086151903100422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yvngbaby,2020/03/22,"Reflection on my body So I'm sorry but I really have to get some things out of my mind because I'm feeling stuck and I don't know what exacrly is gonna come out
English is not my native language so I'm sorry in advance for errors I may make

I have always hated my body, when I was younger I just didn't thought about it that much because I didn't think it matters but as the years passed this costant hate grew and became so much bigger than I would expect
I don't look at myself in the mirror because all I see is a dumb ugly face on a disproportionate body
I go from binge eating to not eating at all and that really fucked up my metabolism 
I tend to isolate, I feel so disgusting my room is a mess and I'm fithly, I rarely shower and I don't see anyone except my parents.
That's why on the rare occasions I have to go out I take really good care of my hygiene and my looks, I'm so ashamed of the real my I don't want people to know how I live. I'm also very into makeup so that helps a lot. But still even when I try my best I hate myself
These days I tried to undersand why I hate myself so much and I realized how many times my body has been mistreated by me and by others

I have so many scars of selfharm, when I mentally feel bad I punish my body and I don't know but maybe that led me into seeing it as an object I can release my pain on

During my short life I got sexually abused several times. My body being watched, touched and used by others without my consent may have left a big invisible scar that led me to despise it even more than I already did 
I feel gross I don't want this body anymore I just want to get rid of it 

I hoped that by trying to understand the causes I could find a way to slowly accept my body but it's not what happened
 I needed somewhere to rant and maybe some of you that had similar issues can help me",2.0156060606060606,3.3529102449494985,4.016047979797978,88.31073863636368,76.60101010101009,6.7681818181818185,22.72853535353536,7.413659706084162,0.7823323232323234,1451,41,319,18,32,496,190,396,0.226,0.7020000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.9966,2,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,1,0,2,20,19,9,1,12,0,29,14,9,7,2,68,74,32,0,8,12,1,5,0,0,4,2,0,2,0,22,17,2,0,14,0,0,8,12,14,0,0,9,11,63,5,44,59,10,36,0,0,6,1,4,19,2,6,8,218,85,0,0.0,0.08522274751890073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937417759201891,0.057520680381431336,0.0598497381344231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133310546758888,0.05029362925561967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060056755253193164,0.13153966005073495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548384717757656,0.0,0.0,0.639165063499806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333524283675409,0.07388972145553213,0.0,0.061959478935638815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057428540118259014,0.0,0.0,0.046387516616495116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472003068020683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501534091666168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14547554054587344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574075721535799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664961437553245,0.07515867199651421,0.0,0.08175651617925438,0.060329672940176174,0.057527277102935065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360556543252895,0.0,0.0,0.2840554657497826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642345127969368,0.0,0.0,0.07144059045675277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507399412251048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185890055904512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814982590023624,0.0,0.05080477178601682,0.0,0.0,0.06351361454465113,0.0,0.12080256693571395,0.0,0.0,0.0611504909270487,0.0,0.0,0.048012402346394666,0.1458471127311418,0.14452239803756875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248636114126944,0.0,0.0726266301384968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862575064885978,0.053333593759951725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653630997518819,0.0,0.07986737189606491,0.0,0.0,0.04986571872374697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186964703301612,0.13823647893472174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17195156587921678,0.0,0.0,0.08125800372388807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16103469173355986,0.0,0.0,0.057441678639752226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408079610940515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04778567138413437,0.04608846574521471,0.0,0.05710268317011401,0.0838834224148902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14650287807569612,0.0,0.0,0.07487943467051571,0.0,0.06212257341199455,0.0,0.05934801401713659,0.1272747390000265,0.057092984052292926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12980740458620987,0.0,0.0,0.06933588634212759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05109548512481532,0.0,0.0,0.04631918095625304
mentalhealth,JustShiddedAnFarded,2020/03/22,"Is the price on a therapist's page before or after insurance? I see therapist pages under my health plan (my parents health plan lol) and they usually say something like $100-$170 or something like that. Is this the co-pay? Or is this the fee before insurance? If so, how much would insurance pay for (from your own experience)?


Thanks!",2.6524193548387096,5.607939967741939,3.4195967741935505,84.34939516129033,84.80645161290323,7.616129032258066,25.491935483870968,8.472884824447931,2.374993548387097,266,11,48,7,8,84,45,62,0.022000000000000002,0.8340000000000001,0.14400000000000002,0.8295,1,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,2,2,3,0,0,4,1,4,2,0,1,0,7,6,7,0,2,4,1,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,3,5,5,4,4,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,4,4,30,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35722613537557363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20532664674658696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4462368321418844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20509724051819156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15430378524593175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330738436375548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16692429492853567,0.0,0.0,0.16726652126527902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231891134018985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193251643901987,0.0,0.487430055573418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311798907138357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491099660329874,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Swaaampyy,2020/03/22,"I wish I could just disappear I just wish i could go a place where no one ever knew me

A place I could start a new

A place I could forget the past I’d left behind 

A place I could be free

Free to be happy

Free to be me",-1.1036538461538434,0.2376328653846187,1.6275384615384638,101.91746153846157,85.73076923076924,4.929230769230768,12.323076923076925,5.6839178017228535,-1.4701584615384613,167,1,47,1,5,58,26,52,0.109,0.545,0.345,0.9325,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,6,0,8,0,0,0,1,12,13,0,0,7,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,9,7,3,4,0,12,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,4,32,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5954318783226472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491724850177605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476697456262122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15877593113606994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205495570858405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14405270553075825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106979869039576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238322643037155,0.0,0.0,0.6233317298310644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557112088898712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430367226009805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sylvan_lad,2020/03/22,"my OCD gave me an ED the more ive thought about it recently the more ive realized how much my ocd impacts my everyday behavior. i have a lot of issues with food, such as food texture, where it's at in my mouth, what it touches, where it is on my fork or plate, smells, flavours... its definitely more than just being picky. i had pasta sauce on the middle of my fork earlier with a chunk of tomato on it and i couldn't eat anymore. i'm underweight, i look unhealthily thin and i'd just like to gain weight. any tips on finding foods that i'll eat to bulk up? any idea how to get rid of this? friends and family constantly ridicule me for being picky or weird about food but, i can't help it, honestly. :/",1.8825092838196265,3.687223627586208,3.3268965517241402,91.07660477453585,78.24137931034483,7.49602122015915,24.257294429708228,8.384062270229773,1.3835092838196292,546,19,123,11,13,179,94,145,0.09,0.853,0.057,-0.7008,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,9,5,1,0,6,0,9,9,1,2,0,18,14,9,0,1,5,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,10,5,8,0,4,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,6,15,3,21,8,5,14,0,0,1,0,3,11,0,3,4,77,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20915197664451016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15250889743592114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618204919205132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.314711610344974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14497053457962802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055255738266284,0.0,0.7438077859887319,0.0,0.118810404387429,0.0,0.08034394495936042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307580291954307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17359942471301282,0.0,0.16050685014599714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512936656072458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12913685847566064,0.0,0.0,0.1307386505580762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11304633464749797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183965518140316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12208451032408385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18726317546075846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KitKat200722,2020/03/23,I feel nothing and I am a very terrible person I’m a terrible human many times things happen I just feel nothing. My friend just told me about his suicide plans and after trying to help and crying my eyes out for a minute I just feel nothing I have terrible thoughts and gory images fly through my brain and I feel nothing now all I can do is fear myself and watch YouTube i can’t do anything to save my friends soon to be doom all I can do is be scared and watch YouTube I truly care about all my friends but I don’t know what to do after I get it all out I just feel nothing and this scared me!,1.810522548317824,3.442894748031499,2.849735146743022,95.19510379384396,77.8976377952756,5.563063707945597,24.14387974230494,6.1124844417494595,0.3914629921259838,471,16,107,3,11,150,66,127,0.183,0.722,0.095,-0.8792,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,0,0,0,1,8,12,0,3,3,0,14,2,2,0,4,27,26,9,1,0,5,0,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,4,10,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,2,8,22,5,12,22,4,7,1,1,3,0,8,2,0,0,5,74,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358857980207165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15408936855768768,0.0,0.0,0.14073282940997597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162167704485707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155324381867955,0.3489656480128562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199295561653926,0.0,0.07211602604433359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220612469978065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251994399386708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585878061752911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994278904632176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6622271622310827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12052422344687312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763882356543955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509846110006585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170233136221534,0.0,0.0,0.10958199439416016,0.0804875726894246,0.0,0.0,0.13189549691031974,0.0,0.09371467137654883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389086078417665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,some-sad-boi,2020/03/23,i'm losing myself why am i here?! should i die ? i've been thinking about it for a wile . i wanna die but i wanna live?!,-3.378888888888888,-2.115971111111106,0.5011851851851858,101.08733333333336,111.96296296296295,2.16,9.103703703703703,3.1291,-2.156194074074074,88,1,22,0,5,32,20,27,0.315,0.685,0.0,-0.7798,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,4,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7546908178566746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.321053561842507,0.0,0.0,0.4067603184446481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23297156355280516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3280802855790529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justneedareasontotry,2020/03/23,"I have no idea what's really wrong with me. This is gonna be long. To start off, I'm 22-years-old and doing absolutely nothing. I'm American and I live with my dad and his girlfriend who is just two years older than me. I've never worked a day in my life but I was in community college for a couple months before I had to drop out because transportation and financial issues. I did get a job at one point but screwed up the process and didn't make it to the orientation. All my life I've been considered a lazy person, but recently I realized there may be more to me than just laziness. My family thinks I'm depressed but we never took that anywhere. I'm not sure what I am, really.

I came to realize that I'm not just lazy, but completely devoid of any motivation or aspiration. Anytime I feel the slightest driven to do something with my life or get out there, I just forget about it to watch TV. It just fizzles away. One time I saw a show that really got me to look at myself and I broke down in tears, promising myself to try the next day. It really got to me. I saw just how bad I was and how hopeless I was making my life out to be. The next day I sat down to watch Seinfield.

That still stuck with me, and it brought me to the realization I'm sharing with you. I want to feel motivated, inspired, passionate. Something gets in the way every time and I just forget about it. It's gotten to the point where my dad's girlfriend confronted me about it, accusing me of being manipulative and taking advantage of his kindness and throwing anything he does in his face when he tries to help. I'm a total hermit, not even comfortable sharing my thoughts with family. Before she came along, my dad and I argued a few times. It usually ended in me crying after being accused of making mistakes on purpose or with manipulative intent.

I don't want to believe I'm a manipulative person. It's a horrible thing to be the kind of snake that toys with people. The times I've been told I was were brought with recollections of my mistakes and at this point I believe they're actually right. It's not just mistakes either -- I often make runs to the convenience store because someone wants a snack or drink, so since my dad is paying I sometimes get something extra for myself. It makes sense to me that I would do such things, considering how quiet I am. I'm so inept at making requests that I find other ways to get what I want without outright asking. That ineptitude stems from our family's financial past and my awkward childhood. We were in some debt for a long while, but as a stupid kid when I asked for anything I'd be simply be told no. Deep down I'm probably afraid of rejection.

I'm in a constant battle with myself to find out what I am and what I can do, but I know that when I do find out I'll just accept that as who I am and make no effort to do anything else. I'm confident that if I try I'll do well in life, but I know that sometimes I do dumb shit without realizing it. I'm considerate of others sometimes and have some friends online who consider me a great person, but I worry that I might have just fooled myself and others into believing I'm good. I might even be leaving out more info here because it might be the one bit of evidence that'll have everyone conclude ""yeah, you're hopeless"". I hate being pressured to change, but at this point it might be the only way for me because any hope or peptalk will just sit in the back of my head. Positive feedback feels wrong to me because I feel like they're only saying that to make me feel better or because I hid something from them. If anyone here tells me I'm a horrible person I'll probably discard it somehow. I can't even trust myself to be honest anymore. It's like some pathetic part of me is hiding memories from the part of me that wants to be honest. Maybe it's obvious what is truly wrong with me, but for the life of me I can't see it or I just refuse to.

Sorry for the long post. Please, at the very least I'd like a name to what my malady is. I genuinely want to understand what my problems are and what I need to be able to feel motivated. Is there medication for this indifference I feel to life?",4.640327057557826,5.229170022485207,5.9163743948359375,80.00942980096829,69.48520710059171,8.98569123184508,29.20979020979021,9.095868883498916,2.3056579881656813,3299,117,661,60,55,1111,330,845,0.17600000000000002,0.703,0.12,-0.9936,2,0,5,0,0,2,74.0,3,1,1,9,38,48,8,3,34,1,62,15,3,19,6,157,133,50,0,15,39,4,7,3,3,9,8,2,0,5,56,42,2,1,28,4,3,9,15,25,1,4,27,15,99,23,110,82,14,83,0,5,6,2,39,37,3,20,34,461,155,8,0.05288899310366793,0.0,0.05161202794020354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193265790269393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052451669462446365,0.036981213708425865,0.0,0.13056940467015726,0.0,0.09888813812533076,0.0,0.04969095002008562,0.0406683710540081,0.044160100066844926,0.19344383578865995,0.0,0.0900092753456275,0.17876335160046025,0.0,0.046776016421758486,0.057741082340087735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098183664413376,0.0,0.0,0.0559495418734597,0.0,0.05545310301399303,0.05715421238604033,0.0,0.0,0.058520664904482336,0.05809607544858945,0.10232707546390164,0.0,0.04555321226118842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046283514277654834,0.0,0.0,0.051811078191628106,0.0,0.0,0.04418196717074938,0.0,0.046843949605007186,0.0,0.0,0.1047980434109968,0.0,0.04456125777340829,0.050537699418561115,0.0,0.0,0.14957710709487704,0.0,0.18719584834754247,0.03778390724098088,0.0,0.0,0.14501874459556374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04086190487507392,0.0,0.13816157991988645,0.0,0.0,0.04436077811407494,0.0846003185729438,0.05831030161134172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05221693104780952,0.05427936539924312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03545037722526161,0.0,0.0,0.05253070383347009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05970523554367465,0.0,0.05520236780843267,0.0524841647498762,0.0,0.0,0.11015149507986888,0.058132814886226764,0.0,0.0,0.056001807129039634,0.0,0.0,0.2614994195972825,0.07751667151266023,0.0,0.0467019498818109,0.14041528373157927,0.04441343377379034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824305086916833,0.0,0.053134102336473615,0.0,0.0,0.053280096347667394,0.0,0.22442745481886592,0.0,0.0,0.04221548970492073,0.0,0.0,0.03921651823237152,0.08158250396909981,0.0,0.11249608835659138,0.0,0.0,0.050748415307001436,0.0,0.05549810137603954,0.0,0.10751685151483607,0.08044892504929045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11454725107303833,0.05048852843176206,0.03666656847280683,0.18472251501823628,0.0,0.05805623216127926,0.19998877486520408,0.0,0.05065303552528159,0.0,0.11404655982523633,0.05060762358567165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552817312911228,0.0,0.05222150011420208,0.0,0.0,0.045166911129983715,0.0,0.04205945012478126,0.0,0.0,0.042145679942602605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05428979138566181,0.04375032163512842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044812672225468066,0.1628661232544847,0.15692569964273848,0.05920489769391452,0.03743510153692973,0.0,0.042237218212086765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04984725008468376,0.0,0.03976594069755359,0.0,0.046227311149340346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027419384175082,0.03388913121688876,0.0,0.04198795276645422,0.12335998880305872,0.0,0.0,0.10107539883712223,0.05876161737660667,0.10772446377811162,0.0,0.05166486119101295,0.0550593070514401,0.0,0.0,0.05824975380302631,0.04363895829397011,0.18717179063462328,0.12594246283710034,0.0,0.0,0.04755355651292336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019662040076314,0.0,0.03850381688433797,0.053711339789594206,0.0,0.0375708232415014,0.17347743391688533,0.0,0.034058777525009166
mentalhealth,ArpeggioLibra,2020/03/23,"I just want to get diagnosed. I'm sick of not knowing what's wrong with me. I'm sick of people saying that there's nothing wrong with me. I just want to learn how I can get better, but it's too expensive.",0.9416666666666664,2.4753524444444466,2.9575,93.89625000000002,80.1111111111111,6.277777777777778,20.13888888888889,7.1686216300943375,0.2575555555555553,160,4,38,2,4,54,29,45,0.102,0.713,0.185,0.129,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,11,8,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,5,1,6,8,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,22,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617911080543764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30043739830623445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.309299302203474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16267582393256227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28402341395287484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20521160892578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353939239512164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3491811560362432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6472668847790973,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UsernameAt20char,2020/03/23,"How do you find a therapist or counselor if you've never had any experience with mental health? I've done Google searches for therapists and counselors in my area but I never know how to choose what is a best fit for me.  Do I just pick someone who seems generally right and maybe get a better recommendation from them or is there a better way? 

TIA",4.694852941176472,6.148343485294117,5.505176470588236,79.81629411764708,70.02941176470588,8.381176470588235,26.835294117647056,8.841846274778883,1.9415670588235288,279,9,54,5,5,91,53,68,0.0,0.708,0.292,0.9768,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,1,3,4,3,0,0,4,0,6,1,0,3,2,18,9,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,6,3,6,7,1,7,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,4,2,37,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518336367114634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240489707419953,0.3776365062130337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21847867010290875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20883827471190647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19512981307444333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115418975899558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226934330283088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11733081816984285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144835997382839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151519194342075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293197467823576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823228635137418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19435708351769299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808929262029216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4957663969173714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16946174303242584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,noahshelpline8115,2020/03/23,"ocd/intrusive thoughts help plz i haven't been diagnosed with anything and ❗️i'm definitely not gonna self diagnose bcs i'm not an idiot so that's not what this is at all ❗️

anyway i brought this up already that i get intrusive thoughts and when i they happen my head shakes like a tic 
lots of people there said it might be to do with ocd so i just wanted to ask u guys what you think?

(SLIGHT TW!!)

my intrusive thoughts are more about hurting people like if i see something i could hurt/kill my self with and my brain doesn't exactly tell me to do it but it does (this makes no sense i'm sorry i can answer questions if u want eheh)
and i also get mental images or me dead or attempting or me slitting other people wrists who are around me and when this happens (especially if i zone out) my head shakes almost to try to get me out of it idk

i would never actually hurt anyone else and i just wanted to know ur guys' thoughts?? idk eheh help 
 
oh also i repeat a word (chatastrophic) that my therapist said once in my head over and over again and and apparently that could be to do with it aswell? 
idk advice plz",1.0117064158548883,3.3579734978165985,2.5821179039301327,92.23755038629496,84.76419213973799,5.793819281155528,19.7247228753779,7.1686216300943375,0.4132356734968092,877,25,189,13,26,286,129,229,0.076,0.826,0.098,0.4348,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,1,13,7,1,2,3,0,16,7,5,1,3,50,39,22,1,9,12,0,0,2,0,3,2,2,0,4,17,16,0,0,8,0,0,3,7,5,0,0,8,3,27,2,22,24,3,16,0,2,1,0,15,8,0,10,7,120,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.10281976111077712,0.0,0.0,0.10296017699830244,0.0,0.0,0.105506514309819,0.0,0.11627145032727472,0.16851860730165527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367274084816651,0.1079575502039426,0.08670533809235302,0.09379602119114286,0.0985008257233764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762072226373445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824866354015516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21388385194006665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220447386623162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801784179385096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16514453559362596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086532338010175,0.18634552359683615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32440062557088994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412461189012508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383820232659709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057905127717747376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295075218084752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957644014730208,0.0,0.0,0.0703310802564243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618181623452126,0.11177422304501547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126297205992708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11220888958597132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21913774530389535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180314447668467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004499916684176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396121827590762,0.0,0.21983461220745365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111411503470592,0.0,0.11794602305743625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09209250786804084,0.0,0.0,0.12233536328926073,0.0,0.06751279721093906,0.0,0.33458799781936194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153502825791322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864387001226256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748473413000166,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lizzybethetreemind,2020/03/23,"being sober sucks when in this time No seems to care or be supportive and I'm fucking losing it 

I just want to stand in front of a mirror scream and punch myself in the face as I used to for an hour or more. ugh. 

My dopamine and serotonin are so low. 

Grant me strength holy fuck I am alone and its even harder with this pandemic happening in a small town.",0.9529729729729725,3.1691985540540566,1.890472972972976,97.98408783783786,83.72972972972974,5.321621621621622,18.70945945945946,6.6274283507984215,-0.14515675675675646,279,7,64,3,8,87,60,74,0.242,0.616,0.142,-0.838,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,4,10,3,0,4,0,4,3,1,1,0,11,14,9,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,7,0,0,0,1,6,3,11,12,1,12,0,2,0,2,0,7,3,3,3,41,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926955177747805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881365684821197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866591915828815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5225310488601903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24990834762612485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783108688729793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31616483214337443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25727470704564753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3206989601524384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647903555795492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24408162345703285,0.0,0.0,0.16668887123188905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cityofthorns,2020/03/23,"In the midst of the coronavirus crisis, and when it starts to slow down, what are some ways I can be involved in helping people with mental health issues? Obviously this whole situation is anxiety and panic-inducing, I am feeling it as I’m sure everyone is. We are all struggling with our own mental illnesses and how to deal with isolation, etc. But I would like to know if anyone has any ideas how I (or anyone interested) can help during this time and even when it starts to get better? 

People are losing their family members, jobs and not able to see people they care about. It’s bound to have an impact on the mental health of a lot of people. Even when all of this is over, life for a lot of people will not be the same. 

Maybe some good non profits for mental health to advocate on behalf of? Or something more effective? I’m open to all ideas that anybody has.",6.082958579881655,6.246209514792903,6.5714142011834324,78.04954733727811,66.27810650887574,9.600236686390533,28.142603550295853,9.3871,2.2674255621301773,684,19,130,12,10,223,104,169,0.091,0.762,0.146,0.8538,1,1,1,0,0,0,19.0,2,0,2,3,8,9,0,1,7,0,16,5,0,3,5,35,25,15,0,2,6,0,1,1,0,2,5,0,0,0,9,10,0,1,5,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,8,7,27,21,12,15,0,1,1,0,8,7,0,7,8,97,17,2,0.11390219308255782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745739716876937,0.0,0.08713486594414446,0.0,0.0,0.15928612352245108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007372336179819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613087703090072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742815963960243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12703105397202732,0.15046264858772418,0.0,0.0,0.1088384266616338,0.0,0.0,0.10737685060264812,0.0,0.057592371200513776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05950919474598495,0.0,0.0,0.0955357555047016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3632181148202565,0.0,0.0,0.15269247813610676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25716342353523064,0.0,0.1188842968593859,0.1130303512377245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259766651848382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045248746224831,0.0556468581181334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742741900674792,0.0,0.1936711427556411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144300624467302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45914648218198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363968198389942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3948271952992457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076530092014716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803083733960754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768747299262468,0.0,0.0,0.16124111703040975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907530302740894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735146900322516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06641728476361232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041025915824824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271677308948574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091284995227788,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skumel98dddd,2020/03/23,"Can I talk/ask questions to someone in DM/Reddit Chat, please? 18 year old guy with some problems",2.407894736842106,4.913615315789475,2.399210526315791,94.78197368421051,80.05263157894737,3.8,25.28947368421053,3.1291,0.17971578947368405,77,3,15,0,2,23,19,19,0.142,0.737,0.121,-0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,2,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3282842471279032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34770048507782925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3684800375990545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3854647650862437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360096756336611,0.0,0.0,0.3933760321108378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29753405498811586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822465702047631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261334948732404
mentalhealth,Papi_83,2020/03/23,"I kindof have trouble explaining my problems and I might visit a therapist soon I tried talking to a school counselor when I was in 8th grade. It was just very awkward. There was silence most of the time, and I had trouble expressing myself.",6.270666666666667,7.444738288888887,6.255555555555558,76.93000000000002,66.1111111111111,8.666666666666668,37.22222222222222,8.841846274778883,3.4798888888888886,193,10,32,3,3,61,36,45,0.217,0.7829999999999999,0.0,-0.8144,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,8,7,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,4,0,7,0,3,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,3,3,27,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4147863167933756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37413158395809104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39571011360056735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142687965110132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.453977968890877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22799365361332555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26546148194526026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226136979375304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,compleatelycluelesss,2020/03/23,"I don’t care about anything and I don’t care anymore, what’s wrong with me? Throw away for obvious reasons (f18) I have to admit I feel ridiculous asking strangers on the internet for mental health advice but I’ve had so many just awful experiences with doctors and psychologists I can’t bring myself to try again, it’s not worth it.

I don’t care about anything and nothing effects me anymore, the only emotion I ever feel is anger but it’s never unprovoked and always goes away after a few minutes. When I’m angry though it’s like a fit of pure blinding rage that makes me lose all sense. 

After that I go back to nothing, I just feel completely neutral and idle. I have no friends and love it! I love being by myself and hate talking to people it’s too much work fostering relationships and i ghost people at the drop of a hat without a second thought. If you annoy me too much I’ll drop you, if you push or challenge me I’ll drop you. I don’t care about people but I don’t actively wish harm on them, I wish them the best but I couldn’t give a single shit what really happens to them.

My mother frequently picks fights with me over things I’ve done in anger that I refuse to apologize for and don’t care if it upsets her. I love my mother very much and would be devastated if something happened to her but I think she’s a drama queen and blows everything out of proportion.

I KNOW I’m an awful person because of the things I do but I don’t care! It’s a very strange feeling, to feel guilty over not caring but to not have it effect me at all.

I’ll date guys and break up with them at random because they make me feel absolutely nothing, I used to care about what people thought about me and my status but it’s not even a thought in my head anymore.    No one can fulfill my expectations, I can do it for myself.

I know I feel nothing because I used to have feelings but they’ve diminished over the past year or so. This wasn’t unprovoked, not going into it, about 6 months ago my father had a mental breakdown and left us. My mom had a super hard time with it but for me it was business as usual. 

Reading this back I feel like a complete asshole, there is no way not to sound cold and psychotic but I’ve never opened up like this before and I want to know what’s wrong with me. I want to know I’m not alone because I just feel crazy I can’t live my life not feeling like this. I’ve tried to talk to my mom who immediately just rolled her eyes and belittled me for “thinking I was a sociopath” without REALLY knowing what it’s like. 

I just needed to get this out, and would definitely appreciate any comments. Thank you all.",2.6012275739453727,4.3691507342007485,3.9077355745918863,87.87729594310653,76.04460966542752,6.536996929044772,24.706804590269922,7.34059242885,1.0536543074187814,2077,70,430,25,46,681,229,538,0.182,0.631,0.187,0.3308,0,1,1,0,1,0,38.0,1,5,5,8,24,34,8,1,19,2,31,10,3,8,8,109,86,40,1,13,32,5,12,5,1,2,4,1,0,2,31,28,0,1,25,2,1,5,26,13,0,2,10,16,73,21,62,71,9,47,0,1,2,3,37,20,1,7,22,292,104,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059329038557736635,0.05381931626427164,0.0,0.0,0.06288141527437513,0.0,0.0,0.050518929097764766,0.0,0.0,0.04128761619279052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806359832024636,0.0,0.0,0.09992493208180127,0.0,0.0567594137625409,0.0,0.11408564246074368,0.09337066885726712,0.0,0.14804281448365195,0.0,0.05166315999734932,0.0,0.06371561918993948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4952159255789938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273149915877236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06214337307699015,0.0,0.0621315228510091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829510164242837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04010103820494392,0.05491930785838674,0.0,0.0,0.05456584713322347,0.05938996255934911,0.0,0.0,0.3376871654796718,0.08674821734183097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046907501949130265,0.0,0.031720570047826316,0.05824242118051867,0.06901035447913614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011642614785475,0.10737841636306236,0.0,0.05438783728828876,0.059942525988230626,0.06231010145138136,0.06453616511406257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668341904226496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596596136794028,0.0,0.04288410849720493,0.14830901917025155,0.0,0.05361159279790589,0.0,0.0,0.067923459355665,0.0,0.0,0.1643903229207165,0.0,0.08105416082199363,0.06155448776258275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223709059787705,0.0,0.0,0.14221505500058712,0.04846135224657648,0.0,0.13389537364575982,0.04501867720183572,0.0936527916563154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330269621258459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041141391861322665,0.046175748782296584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057958402895364615,0.16836582996944716,0.05301314121158239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06073045098852145,0.0,0.07778991293543308,0.06242412540365221,0.0,0.06518413687167726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06232206998245576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04674061951690408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975992604059894,0.0,0.05589731326999551,0.0,0.0,0.08067139539097469,0.0778061861516516,0.05965121728432168,0.1446004523470379,0.03540283384313038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244166965277243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730314916371608,0.10487484087306913,0.06686791642253001,0.10019085147844392,0.07162140516011949,0.04819196379505433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13963625544147726,0.11705229914895715,0.0,0.04420053032458562,0.0,0.0,0.0862589969713431,0.13276250164164174,0.0,0.03909783888009386
mentalhealth,Prayerz1996,2020/03/23,"Terrified of weaning off Cymbalta I don’t really know if I’m posting this correctly, I just made a reddit account for this purpose because I’m afraid of what’s going to happen and I feel like I have no one to turn to. I’m 24 female and I guess sorta healthy normalish. I was “forced” by my grandparents and mom to get on medication since I basically have always been depressed since I was a teen and have always underachieved and have no confidence. I’d say I’ve gotten slightly better but idk i only have 7 days worth of medication left and I don’t have health insurance anymore and will have no money until a couple weeks from now . I think I want to wean off the Cymbalta over the next week to just get it over with and possibly feel better without the meds? I think I have the coping skills to do without antidepressants it’s just the withdrawal I am so scared for and at the same time I feel like I have to wean off it anyways because I’m unsure of how I would even be able to get more since I moved away and don’t have money to buy them before I start to withdrawal. I’m so sorry this is all typed poorly I’m just really desperate I don’t know what steps to take",3.479050253573078,4.7280345560166035,5.054903181189491,82.66851429230063,72.73443983402491,8.509082526509912,25.83702166897188,8.998388855275968,1.9256554172429687,932,30,190,19,18,315,126,241,0.114,0.797,0.08900000000000001,-0.7754,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,3,10,7,0,2,9,0,23,3,0,2,2,35,48,16,0,3,8,1,3,2,0,2,3,1,0,0,8,11,0,0,7,0,6,3,9,3,0,1,5,4,23,4,32,40,3,21,0,1,0,0,3,9,0,3,10,124,31,1,0.12649762195406272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21051230995798906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545165005343709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884867987292215,0.0,0.0,0.15422355246943714,0.0,0.10764015929281033,0.0,0.0,0.22375373379631527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399672126689476,0.0,0.08158050127320841,0.0,0.10895221643025302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355048627317224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918829954647184,0.1807398527988048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19826935942257246,0.0,0.07189151369533574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935139205040115,0.0,0.1118614293291657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344610568416879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13903956965468178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374400363801357,0.0,0.0,0.12360069689012752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969510847747625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051034114341435,0.25486609178785263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14815248597728428,0.0,0.13444695295316694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453165603237802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571806242026066,0.0962071416972212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14260706213624896,0.12114975465960252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207523156100928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005959862206444,0.1266461872645892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139204202122718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14160373126472633,0.08953566789877268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511046888616136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16210913679611408,0.0,0.0,0.0737617806283427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759308797945893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461157486887864,0.0,0.20293752422523426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24387838697110045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986028124208617,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,butterflyandthewolf,2020/03/23,"I feel like I'm losing my grasp - voices - sleep disorders - I have always heard distance voices I couldn't make out what they were saying.  I drowned them out with noise and keeping my mind busy.  No one knows. Not my doctor, not my therapist. I've shared that I'm depressed and have OCD. The voices were constant since I was a child.  

I was told I look like my mind is always whirring. It never stops. But I've been able to distinguish reality from fantasy.  Until now.

The last week I have been ""waking up"" and carrying on conversations with people who are not here. They will smile at me and tell me it's OK to go back to bed.  I will walk into a room and laugh and talk with them.  I do things for what seems like over an hour sometimes.  Then I ""wake up"" and I'm late for work.  I relax because I was told by my coworkers not to come to work.  But then I remember their wide grinning faces and where we were sitting (a garden patio that isn't real) and I realize it wasn't reality. I panic. I get to work and can't explain what happened.  I didn't oversleep, I wake up and turn my alarm off, then imagine these things. It's frightening how real they are, and I'm worried I'm walking around during.  I'm starting to wonder what else I may imagine that isn't real.  

My worry is, the voices have never talked to me and now they are speaking directly to me and telling me what to do. They smile, I nod.  I don't realize at all it's not real.  It's only happening when I first wake up, as far as I know, but what if it starts to happen more, I've noticed I lose a little grip on reality when I'm just tired now, and I'm always tired like I didn't sleep at night.   I'm afraid to tell a therapist and get forced treatment in a facility because I panic when I'm confined due to past trauma as a child. When I'm falling asleep it's also different.  I sometimes now fall asleep in my body before my mind. I am aware, looking around the room but I'm snoring and my body is relaxed and not moving.  I've done this falling asleep while aware, while standing at work.  I will stand there eyes open and suddenly let out a snore sound and jerk ""awake"".  I don't know what to do.",1.9395611770779555,3.6376001476510105,3.5310067114093973,90.16127000516262,77.72483221476509,6.3743245568748925,22.870934434692828,7.2200825789825185,0.7241209086215794,1674,51,364,20,39,555,202,447,0.094,0.825,0.081,-0.8537,1,0,0,0,0,0,56.0,1,0,8,7,17,19,1,4,13,1,37,16,13,2,3,75,73,40,1,2,12,0,2,4,0,4,3,8,5,2,23,32,0,3,14,4,0,8,18,9,0,2,15,13,56,10,45,52,2,68,0,3,3,0,25,27,0,4,34,232,79,5,0.08009893723686554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06405509116937241,0.19994619711945105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426100722033211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061591138522821325,0.0,0.09765513737627336,0.0,0.06815829602308278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779437245146638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899814198495394,0.0,0.08655849548427944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689890972719898,0.0,0.0,0.08368634122277026,0.09180032151993064,0.08198465634451478,0.0,0.08196902255032956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691238399026504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040500429370737286,0.05722269676654116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813211509511677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369677748908917,0.0,0.04552207191244367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21249367700327296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888131847609779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711956157399824,0.0,0.0,0.13206084341161164,0.06529132451078723,0.09035509006731582,0.0,0.0,0.08190659019372733,0.0,0.15652917912133446,0.08028017785717935,0.0,0.0,0.13452586769226282,0.17922044450679264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05346666258404872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24263127890681985,0.0,0.0,0.08513249403371621,0.0,0.0,0.12355447667983813,0.0,0.0,0.07516742654598198,0.0,0.0,0.09119317093635283,0.0,0.0,0.05427711284848915,0.060918851164983925,0.0,0.18795768913464805,0.0,0.0,0.07646349897625386,0.055530517683289086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36468050585834827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907364815347344,0.0,0.0,0.06369788982668853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291906415474816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625866860191369,0.0,0.1603135674628021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584397941035637,0.0,0.11338888008644173,0.0,0.0,0.06696629812300861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287609833143515,0.21003000494577054,0.0,0.0,0.1860020795140981,0.1064283494841453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18412389064821416,0.0,0.15307593418874013,0.0,0.0,0.08712464272486851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425053595799969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686388064147672,0.2332519211287055,0.16268871771795174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,armahnr3,2020/03/23,"Mental health article relating to coronavirus Hey everyone, the anxiety of coronavirus is real and so I wrote this article to help out. Hope you find it beneficial! [https://medium.com/@armahn/how-coverage-of-the-coronavirus-pandemic-is-affecting-our-mental-health-57e63b3ccab5](https://medium.com/@armahn/how-coverage-of-the-coronavirus-pandemic-is-affecting-our-mental-health-57e63b3ccab5)",40.33913793103449,52.70393868965519,20.60301724137931,-39.737543103448246,6.931034482758617,15.313793103448276,38.28448275862068,11.698219412168324,8.337889655172415,358,9,18,9,4,82,26,29,0.049,0.696,0.255,0.7959,0,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495144716165746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19354676839496987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18512852580739814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6459087521039555,0.0,0.0,0.13576609203172502,0.0,0.0,0.2011794776069145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6123732254223688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23054810600893935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,obiwan_kenobinil,2020/03/23,"Anxiety coping strategies - thread Hey Reddit, hope everyone is doing as best as they can through these tough times. This may have been done already, but I've found my anxiety really flaring up recently back to the point where I'm getting physical symptoms and trouble sleeping again.

As much as it helps in the short term, I don't especially want myself or my apartment smelling of deep heat for any longer than needs be, so what other strategies do people have please? I've come across one called voice therapy - related to insecurities, but can also be adapted to other forms of anxiety. Has anyone else got any other mechanisms to share?

Stay strong people, and if anyone ever needs to send a message to a non-judgemental friend then please dm me and I'll get back to you ASAP - we are in this together",7.2683146905294524,7.9045532214765135,7.1015659955257275,73.63513795674871,63.765100671140935,10.38061148396719,34.005219985085766,10.25414643259724,3.5603372110365408,646,26,110,14,9,205,111,149,0.094,0.7509999999999999,0.155,0.9209,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,1,1,2,7,8,0,1,4,0,15,2,1,0,1,16,25,14,0,5,4,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,8,5,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,4,2,8,5,20,18,4,20,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,4,8,74,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680770218574881,0.1218016355825466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071509975565448,0.0,0.3495484304027789,0.0,0.0,0.2129963088786488,0.15605880441187264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342327915710726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983913933778532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15552475223031345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13120091459556826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586522213095466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723481712314824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777241770095625,0.0,0.1455379955920644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16699920835848,0.11767373267900888,0.0,0.15915057187575946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181560432323787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208966580802148,0.0,0.0,0.1512774311241349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196480840409433,0.2258707271325768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320867551595124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111840840468327,0.0,0.0,0.33437959216944096,0.14398145231015705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757319234154244,0.0,0.15038698913628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15241922512771855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234137296489226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15830760732592813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741788774984812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888127363988339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983592959231497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kinleyy17,2020/03/23,"why is this happening to me so lately, my parents and boyfriend have been getting angry with me because i won’t eat. i’m hungry, but i simply just don’t feel like eating. i’ll get up and do anything else, but eat. it just isn’t my main priority anymore. what’s going on?? i used to LOVE to eat.",0.11571428571428301,2.19118120634921,2.7168253968254,91.61428571428574,86.14285714285714,4.8698412698412685,21.698412698412696,6.1826913282559595,0.2958317460317459,228,8,50,2,7,79,46,63,0.034,0.8009999999999999,0.165,0.8849,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,0,9,15,5,0,0,4,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,4,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,7,2,6,13,1,4,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888943062509667,0.0,0.0,0.1567399561382855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610828131341802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7795903361010924,0.1591126102000804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963069711032797,0.13607126367723968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19902463396853126,0.0,0.10824805890578447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843132059541516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148575998662013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930536500765499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190592622775738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21149355138127107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645042695150182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17186886421685085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,woweekazowee,2020/03/23,"Can we just all agree this sucks? I never post on here anymore but man... this quarantine is totally fucking me. I can't stand staying at home because my parents are extremely possessive and weird so now I'm stuck at home with them. My boyfriend of 4+ years dumped me yesterday out of the blue. My job let me go today because of the corona virus situation. And now I cant get unemployment because the website has crashed for days. Mentally, I'm staying afloat but I truly think it's because I'm just pissed at how bad this year has been lol.

This literally just... sucks. This whole week has been a big ""wtf"".

Screw you, 2020.",2.102476547842404,4.543685439024394,3.2577235772357724,88.55836772983116,80.78861788617886,6.711444652908067,26.53470919324578,7.882392219407189,1.678676547842402,491,21,100,9,13,158,86,123,0.21100000000000002,0.7,0.08900000000000001,-0.9529,4,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,1,1,0,8,8,6,0,4,1,11,3,1,1,3,15,21,6,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,6,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,3,1,13,0,10,17,3,20,0,0,1,2,5,6,5,0,9,60,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18114288102354945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15250778162788028,0.44537474962028206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11779619502557065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885992804937572,0.0954287514199032,0.0,0.1038060153562746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3664320781707294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18125510414332915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18677525873127007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18407145190123494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087339794454504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20281474849859046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17493126304029294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053098349375295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3893679888986217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703678694931705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313386409906295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14651336905607376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039257602459368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23524532767970086
mentalhealth,MotownandGuinness,2020/03/23,"Quarantining with claustrophobia/anxiety? I don't have claustrophobia but I need to go outside at least once a day or I start to feel down, anxious and pessimistic about the future. How are people in a similar state coping through covid19 and ensuing quarantine.",5.573333333333334,9.004341888888893,5.751111111111115,69.86000000000003,74.55555555555556,9.822222222222225,35.66666666666667,9.888512548439397,4.773133333333334,215,12,32,7,5,68,39,45,0.138,0.862,0.0,-0.6956,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,8,7,5,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,8,7,1,8,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,3,23,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3255565493748777,0.480768040164729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27445463129516884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21517877413589265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418587600783073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3155515293489285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4532135170821305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950336307015831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012175499955457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Biedlonka_,2020/03/23,"How to stay productive while experiencing fear? So here I am, in the midst of the whole coronavirus situation. I'm extremely privileged and lucky to be able to work from home in a stable industry and suddenly I have plenty of time due to the fact that I don't need to spend 3+ hours daily on my commute and errands. 

However, my mum is a doctor, who lives with my dad, who is immunocompromised due to his transplant several years ago. All of my grandparents are 75+ with health problems and my brother is a medical student, close to finishing his degree. Due to my job, I moved away, so I no longer live with them. In different circumstances, I would be happy to finally have time to work on my goals and advance my career, but in this situation I feel like whatever I do is pointless - because if something happens to them, I just feel like... nothing that I learnt, achieved, completed during that time will matter. So instead of spending this time finishing my Courseras and reading a long-forgotten pile of books, I'm constantly checking news and trying to do everything in my power to help my mum's and bro's situation.

How can I overcome this? I still believe everything will turn out well for my family and we will get through this together, but this paralyzing fear makes it extremely hard to get motivated to do anything, let alone focus on any intellectual effort.

Thank you so much for your help.",8.743179292190696,7.776376532319393,8.945627376425858,66.96008482012286,61.24334600760456,12.959227844398947,40.38286048552208,12.09199376347754,5.013858379643171,1120,53,198,32,13,371,155,263,0.055,0.818,0.127,0.9616,5,1,1,0,0,0,33.0,1,2,2,8,11,10,0,2,7,0,20,3,0,4,2,33,31,19,0,4,4,5,3,2,0,4,3,0,1,0,11,15,0,0,3,2,3,2,2,3,1,0,0,4,31,7,37,24,3,31,0,0,0,0,16,11,0,2,19,134,42,11,0.1158307021761358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267692865449404,0.0,0.0,0.11996567474244935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876884948379707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531879847551536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882675760803276,0.0,0.0,0.0706093209448642,0.0,0.0,0.13050153616811655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144628746034775,0.125171839441578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210184304658136,0.0,0.11855763184437912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20820233261823795,0.0,0.10919487734315944,0.26068348560047017,0.11713496668688315,0.16549895355740013,0.0,0.12688687247396374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210335223022039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242870739758847,0.1233039363296516,0.10376155768127224,0.0,0.0,0.12312261992540804,0.0,0.0,0.1552777561245034,0.0,0.1161876385408462,0.0,0.11406990932534562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494409893926585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844474074527304,0.0,0.11317806049699725,0.0,0.20456126427673288,0.10250652644625097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731789314271359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668724643454186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310970534815704,0.08514889375086811,0.08588699797810669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111426827093154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083433870453822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158620476091634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085572356046832,0.0,0.0,0.3905956870864582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917213351129072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346011675443708,0.09250254838247976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664134821815548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27016725569894784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864144345061608,0.12599054234419696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414571196445163,0.0,0.0,0.12932084242680705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16865226144246326,0.0,0.0,0.08228280748072668,0.0,0.0,0.07459117454268589
mentalhealth,thisthrowawayforarsn,2020/03/23,"I wanna fucking end it You dont have to read I just want to offload and no one cares about me anymore.

I'm 16, homeless due to living at home really negatively impacting my mental health. 

The man I love blocked me on everything, without explaining why. Knowing how scared of lockdown I was and how shit I felt. I want to fucking kill myself. 

I cant cope on my own, the pictures of my sexual assault noticing how little everyone talks I cant cope anymore I just want to fucking die. It's better than going through all of this shit. My mental health has constantly been in decline for years. What's the point in going through this knowing I wont even be happy after. 

I dont want you to talk me out of it, I dont know when I'll do it, I just highly doubt I'll see all of this through.",1.1349765427643457,3.2981199570552127,3.1346878383255152,89.6661313605197,82.55828220858895,5.7984843016961385,24.92565860700109,7.048011613610866,1.099257235654998,615,25,128,8,17,207,93,163,0.19399999999999998,0.715,0.091,-0.9666,0,3,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,2,0,1,9,13,7,2,3,0,12,8,2,3,2,24,30,6,2,5,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,8,3,0,1,5,1,0,2,9,9,0,1,3,2,23,4,26,25,3,17,0,0,1,4,7,9,5,1,6,88,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340631827567265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436791995912052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031636807405835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752403303967766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247300849238205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4149112403679479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451949432509353,0.0,0.0,0.07794274818083627,0.0,0.0,0.11276108936418465,0.10605740581186512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330557141413375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272877077143078,0.0,0.0,0.1341326040874028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562102882385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25087261034663705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468125466131047,0.1183710035914305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055765935173433,0.0,0.19456127632819897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182743761454296,0.10420266068087848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650624951647003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378473260622017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435216125715266,0.0,0.0,0.07996484104146813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155509834172793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803929424758312,0.0,0.07559853642627304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814595369023607,0.0,0.09403658728036036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422657180058812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18969969150379845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784151930542592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064832873308851,0.0,0.0,0.1137548837255577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599287067511293
mentalhealth,YoungLords12,2020/03/23,"Stop feeding your thoughts and feelings Your feelings and thoughts are meaningless, you don't control them similar to how you cant control your knees from jerking when its hit. So why question it? Or try to solve it? Theres nothing to solve or fix, your bodies are just overly sensitized, cut this cycle by realizing this truth and letting go of these feelings and thoughts. Acceptance is the key to mental well being and happiness",7.504615384615384,8.686522282051287,6.529897435897437,76.03176923076926,63.35897435897437,9.316923076923075,39.95897435897436,9.3871,3.991525128205129,350,19,57,6,5,106,57,78,0.081,0.746,0.17300000000000001,0.7955,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,6,1,2,6,6,2,0,1,0,7,3,2,3,1,22,15,10,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,5,1,3,9,0,0,1,2,2,1,0,3,3,7,4,8,9,0,4,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,3,2,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330634824198169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4706634834699491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182749310565548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924593166538065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233580227683132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145558681066026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21144990200835506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20132860794281848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23504718900956395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17541948936812188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4997225645195339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245447339017125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18865399594371493,0.0,0.18933053437611347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,authornikka,2020/03/23,"Struggled with mental health for a long time, finally wrote a book on it. Hi Reddit,

Long time scroller, first time poster. 

I've struggled with mental illness (specifically bipolar disorder) for over 10 years now. I've always loved writing, and last year I had the opportunity to write a book. I chose to write it on the topic of mental illness, my experience, and looking at it as something that we manage, rather than cure. 

I know a lot of individuals also suffer with it, so I'm attaching the link where you can find out more about it here: [https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/outside-of-your-head-by-nikolina-kosanovic/x/](https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/outside-of-your-head-by-nikolina-kosanovic/x/23231972?create_edit=true#/)

I'm currently crowdsourcing pre-orders to fund the publishing of the book , and I was wondering if I could get some support from the Reddit community. Whether that mean getting yourself or a loved one a copy if you're able to, or just sharing it with someone who might really benefit from the words of the book. 

Thank you all, and hope you're taking care of yourselves physically and mentally during this crazy time. <3",11.040837937384904,13.358587701657465,7.894709944751379,65.32652163904237,55.96132596685084,9.7902394106814,32.76289134438306,9.928628108626363,3.282292449355433,958,32,137,17,12,270,116,181,0.085,0.769,0.145,0.9108,1,0,1,0,0,0,63.0,1,2,0,2,8,12,0,2,14,0,5,6,0,0,1,34,21,13,0,5,7,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,10,11,0,0,5,4,1,0,0,3,0,2,3,1,9,9,25,16,4,19,0,1,1,2,12,6,0,9,13,86,19,6,0.12768807940475452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211211096754974,0.10624671094352814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018650691754038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194854133111217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634160137425564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490344307930533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13987604964389547,0.11670459131134388,0.1086114151121986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13342350271571593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2620896149621565,0.1357264574434732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682307392633255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017402910908915,0.1040828270158112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259998643273547,0.10722582763543384,0.0,0.0,0.10855583894099204,0.23048695387650775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908975151494754,0.0,0.0,0.5147182059328073,0.13545687386857685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865247471981304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180025330682299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818969531616912,0.0983005218009196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669746092963914,0.0,0.0,0.14489891933631555,0.0,0.0,0.09600554473482384,0.0,0.0,0.11755802808139534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978237837649852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847227530565967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16445387343706633
mentalhealth,kittyindaspace,2020/03/23,I was diagnosed with ocd but i feel like i have schizophrenia I feel like someone else is living my life and I'm just a viewer of this show. I don't know how I got 23 y.o...Life is so strange. I know there are plenty of emotions. But i feel nothing. Only sometimes my brain starts to pain because i try so hard to understand what i should be doing hah. I can't love and I don't need other people to love me. Sometimes I think to kill myself but these thoughts make me anxious...,-0.06264615384615269,2.22589532,1.5700000000000005,97.50730769230772,90.8,3.876923076923077,19.69230769230769,5.369823440869387,-0.3268461538461538,372,12,82,2,13,120,66,100,0.243,0.696,0.062,-0.9681,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,1,1,11,6,1,2,0,19,26,8,1,2,4,0,4,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,8,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,5,18,4,7,21,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,3,51,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20154140384004784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875108310294453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19915358163085267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810724094660684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14903044381379255,0.2006761706103592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706134471900571,0.25489822322218897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14268290697636904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15981150408029474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973733474296756,0.0,0.19608812729314407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126009310569821,0.17431461594355233,0.0,0.1575306117755581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32202622341155984,0.0,0.11908349365197254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228145986381815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17117976722992542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568136246744367,0.18983035086058608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368020988094296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15115787860765467,0.0,0.3528846444397397,0.0,0.12627255311430713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431162053509625,0.0,0.14162980139462847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112199972453523,0.0,0.0,0.1857208606000786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kentucky_philosopher,2020/03/23,"Anyone else feel stuck in their early 20s? I’m 22, married to a beautiful lady I don’t deserve, college graduate - future lawyer. I have a dog, cat, rabbit, and I’m getting some chickens. But I feel like something is missing and I don’t have any direction all the time. My head feels like you have a radio tuned between 2 stations. I just want to get my life together on a deeper level. Anyone else in their 20s have this problem?",1.9105751633986927,4.309130305882352,3.641568627450983,85.77594771241833,81.23529411764707,5.660130718954249,25.91503267973856,6.937597516519254,1.3657581699346406,336,14,62,4,9,112,60,85,0.08900000000000001,0.782,0.129,0.4998,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,2,0,1,4,0,0,5,0,7,2,1,0,1,11,17,3,0,2,2,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,10,2,6,16,2,7,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,5,35,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538153758145707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163113640168966,0.4635120068535027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3779015586377398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34310185511233704,0.32317704149768106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363474500526282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23213381046353104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15976304454511495,0.22100774637937068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21643105837803028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17413032332086656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318918526817921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334113514768027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deanoraff,2020/03/23,Frustrating How are you supposed to get better if you have been diagnosed with 4 different illnesses by 3 different psychiatrists in the past 15 years or so with little help from the different medications I've been prescribed.,20.774615384615377,11.784444923076926,18.076410256410266,34.92692307692309,48.48717948717949,23.805128205128213,64.64102564102564,19.287186520377343,10.67682564102564,188,10,27,8,1,61,33,39,0.14,0.733,0.128,-0.1354,3,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,2,0,1,2,2,1,0,2,0,4,3,0,1,0,5,5,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,6,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,2,2,18,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231773566753316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561233836348334,0.0,0.7909358793246404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318390857510677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16914055722361646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529145224020934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25420957097039554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408904643830801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250096782694318
mentalhealth,kidruzen,2020/03/23,"Growing up Hello, I am a 25 year old male that is suffering from bad habits and low self esteem. Serval of my bad habits is eating unhealthy or too much when I’m emotionally unstable, Excessively masturbating and watching porn, and obsessively caring about my appearance. Most of these habits I do unconsciously. Ever since I broke up with my girlfriend about a year ago, I have lost my self esteem and confidence with a lot of things. I have a hard time to talk to girls or how to act around them. They always lose interest instantly because they think I am a weirdo. My insecurities have risen to the max making me feel like I’m not good enough or just ugly for anyone to be with me, internally and externally. I also have a hard time to process and store information about what I just read. Also, I can’t think clearly on what I what to say and speak fluently to someone. I sometimes can’t pronounce words correctly which makes me sound stupid. With everything on lockdown and staying at home, I want break all of these barriers that are stopping me from reaching my full potential. Are there any tips or suggestions I can do?
Thanks",5.770422535211267,7.208469985915496,6.069126760563383,76.84171830985915,67.45070422535211,9.623661971830987,30.631924882629107,9.888512548439397,2.989756431924884,909,35,166,21,15,291,132,213,0.2,0.703,0.09699999999999999,-0.9683,0,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,3,2,13,15,1,2,7,0,16,2,0,3,4,38,28,16,0,1,7,0,3,1,1,0,0,3,1,4,9,13,1,2,4,1,1,3,3,10,0,0,1,7,26,5,28,26,6,22,0,5,1,1,14,8,0,7,10,114,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266642928024006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393694685346588,0.1245308636317878,0.0,0.0,0.10177536605805608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464722623033476,0.0,0.0,0.1332310069652998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24992321877182916,0.09123263235871633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525904942908218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314170040104544,0.0,0.16834972833437667,0.0,0.1546409655052231,0.0,0.0,0.13537794564943642,0.0,0.0,0.13450665304386045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567365900912396,0.10691864036934047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12552947611883242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681357055478606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15012329774282362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731173465926536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16743361756640746,0.16337387102177164,0.1272373728611734,0.0,0.0,0.19980123942412087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001887024788592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704520721907028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970260940632565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901731584673875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122604389640248,0.0,0.0,0.12380204289395873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680821904165698,0.0,0.14801965236857215,0.0,0.0,0.1595198947121586,0.0,0.12512422431070236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202927338845686,0.0,0.13778876196560394,0.0,0.0,0.09942885486525484,0.1917948723459684,0.0,0.0,0.17453835828411407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827458933117499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19275498229395388
mentalhealth,Akira_Tanikel,2020/03/23,"How do I refuse a type of therapy without my therapist thinking I'm insane? Asking this more so for someone else right now that I'm trying to give advice to, but also for myself in the future potentially.   


How can I/someone refuse a form of therapy suggested/imposed by a therapist that you're not comfortable with and feel wouldn't be helpful or what you want? I know that may not be the best wording, but i mean knowing how to refuse a form of therapy that's against what you want, and goes in a direction that's uncomfortable, or maybe even the opposite of what you went to get help for, without the therapist thinking you're insane for refusing that specific form of therapy?",9.11765903307888,7.350913297709923,9.228816793893133,67.78409033078883,61.061068702290065,13.31348600508906,41.68066157760814,12.161744961471696,5.119121119592876,546,26,98,15,6,181,73,131,0.225,0.728,0.047,-0.977,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,0,1,7,2,0,0,9,0,6,0,0,3,0,29,20,11,0,3,8,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,4,6,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,1,8,2,20,15,5,6,0,0,0,0,11,3,0,3,2,73,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304852421209058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10678493334367946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248337412418767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401328624058501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154826780862644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819616509341628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751743806450901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976459358726664,0.1280953916361202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17900643298012034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14677062201275773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415013990422536,0.14545473307306964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11403500164092847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262812763998494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6108187212624735,0.4651203979285509,0.0,0.1711229321308226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065898830490107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15752044227487322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237848540256272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25743881860476664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Exciting-Anxiety,2020/03/23,"I really need to talk to someone.. Because of the complete lockdown in my country due to the coronavirus outbreak, my mental health began to je worse and worse. I am feeling the lowest I've felt in a year. I really need someone to talk to",3.285,5.200533617021278,5.06058510638298,79.70875000000002,74.53191489361703,7.253191489361702,30.89893617021277,8.07648339933343,2.512365957446809,188,9,33,3,4,64,30,47,0.182,0.787,0.031,-0.8074,1,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,5,0,9,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14112042046271545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24272363649301826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705349611453418,0.0,0.2222765705018372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24607396955300245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332978302845559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34330904488984154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966100113536708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3922988677762743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721423079771084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.471837120811113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907858868223922
mentalhealth,-Dill-,2020/03/23,"Surgery or Not. It's a lose lose. For me anyway.
If I start giving a backstory and context I probably will cry and not even finish this so I will keep it shor

My dentist messed up my face and health. Ultimately having a domino effect and messing the rest of life. People say you can only fix this with surgery if older than 16. I'm 18. What would of only needed Invisalign now needs highly invasive surgery. I truly felt like before this (16) my life was set up so perfectly. Noone understands.

Non-surgery approach = no I'm way staying like this. I felt like I've been strong for so long but now I just want to be weak. I'm so PG but now I wish I was an addict or something just to take my mind off life. It's nothing to do with conventional attractiveness, I literally can't avoid the problem because it's triggered human faces and like 99.9% of humans I see - Online and irl have good facial growth.  

Surgery approach = I don't even want to enhance myself I just want to go back to normal but I feel like I'll just feel guilty and a catfish/phony which will lead to me to ....... and also will be judged. People say it tends to look unnatural also. more time my life is on hold. The worst part is that I feel like I had decent genetics to work with (without sounding cocky)

Lose. Lose.",0.8749444980694996,3.33656064864865,2.510191843629343,91.48161981177608,87.3011583011583,4.9363416988417,20.448962355212355,6.4784943948869325,0.301711293436294,1004,32,206,11,32,328,148,259,0.09300000000000001,0.72,0.187,0.9571,0,1,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,0,9,17,20,0,1,8,0,19,11,3,3,1,48,42,21,0,11,14,0,5,6,0,5,8,3,0,2,12,11,0,3,7,0,0,5,6,10,0,0,6,10,24,10,24,29,4,23,1,4,2,0,6,5,0,4,16,126,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721078249017965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17196464026272332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267491144023847,0.0,0.06554213826779808,0.0,0.09149012703407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810376880743477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202960406435267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630934006980567,0.15362214438664676,0.2064687969289664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031413199047611,0.06110510950439644,0.09018122208855373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428689117894142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359895337990282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955671768278049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30377332972690185,0.3151679689329297,0.0,0.0,0.09515028384054376,0.09028826601214772,0.4811417594558382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856280073915983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594468668317254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10534507442006552,0.10316667799816594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16354497565392326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643180674251355,0.0,0.14907925853636975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592287801610893,0.10288046188498548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710056844752189,0.0,0.0,0.08567813921575547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277281562862376,0.0,0.0,0.07610198353437557,0.11460016800326375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084035677607995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269476675139993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119303088976336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19025118063221816,0.08534299663158508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364070209369755,0.10364377362241786,0.0,0.07827457969232007,0.0,0.0,0.07637789278805772,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,romanusyeetus,2020/03/23,"I dont know if i have problems or if i chalk them up Others have to have it worse, Ive always been fine so how could I be struggling from any mental illness? Ive never been so sad I was unable to do anything, or the general extreme signs. I still feel as though something is wrong with me, and I don't think its healthy to just say im 100% healthy. I want to get myself evaluated and just told my brother, he approves but i dont think my parents will. Ill go with him and finally figure this shit out once this corona quarantine is over. This all feels like im dropping a heavy weight and im sorry if it isnt coherent, I just need to write my thoughts down",1.2806868131868114,3.0812576071428595,2.9385714285714317,93.17565934065935,80.07142857142857,5.736263736263738,23.62637362637363,6.67199483983844,0.5748296703296707,515,18,116,5,13,170,92,140,0.19,0.755,0.055,-0.9504,2,1,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,1,8,7,1,1,2,0,18,4,1,1,2,33,29,15,0,7,9,2,3,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,7,7,1,0,7,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,5,4,19,2,13,21,1,9,0,1,0,0,8,4,1,5,4,77,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295462139566203,0.0,0.0,0.10587426251097463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12811926996728967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243054719582366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3649340885027624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15744267300454054,0.11122467681740172,0.0,0.17055033980493028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134138683520682,0.0,0.0884819839438356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5045144328565725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556292903971459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606207127607538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689849182385654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11544186096159892,0.12007741258791473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658043360869238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17287486913580494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14897391479163816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12381061379942608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15981313057017862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11985745550314422,0.0,0.1742817536051633,0.0,0.0,0.1243339106075856,0.0,0.0,0.16276056712606482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995192102913452,0.1529642352895698,0.12360014666794322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14876807867101166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182975611766432,0.0,0.0,0.18958798205449756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586609968714209,0.0,0.1702221301029642,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,babentsen200,2020/03/23,"I just need to vent Hi! Im just looking for someone to vent to. Like fuck. Its just been a lot lately. Im not looking to put all My problems on someone, just someone to talk to and to able to say i just fucking hate life rn, Without being called ungratefull, or be called attention-seeker",1.4485310734463293,3.613480661016952,3.0450000000000017,90.74569209039551,81.37288135593221,5.289265536723164,26.78248587570621,6.42735559955562,1.0738790960451978,225,10,46,2,6,74,39,59,0.16899999999999998,0.7909999999999999,0.04,-0.8395,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,3,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,13,9,2,0,2,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,1,3,3,1,11,6,2,3,0,0,2,2,5,1,2,2,2,29,4,0,0.1798096221487798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3672114562697357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33246219652579323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775247757708658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884504948135175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20283308573968786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700485372596004,0.08784589884705696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.301989592788873,0.0,0.0,0.1528677106979554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332655646387084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17205352457648154,0.0,0.18075833401040745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299182856248938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4570563280271474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452416321575715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333005923009406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,violetdonut,2020/03/23,"I hope I don't wake up tomorrow There used to be a time when the thought of dying would scare me. But now everything has changed. I lost the old me, I lost the person that I once was, now I just want to stop existing. I am way too much of chicken to hurt myself physically but I keep thinking of ways I can end my life less painfully.",2.8515492957746464,3.564618661971835,4.240957746478873,89.9487605633803,73.64788732394365,7.933521126760564,26.876056338028175,8.238735603445708,1.424028732394366,259,9,61,4,5,86,53,71,0.195,0.76,0.045,-0.8504,0,0,0,0,0,4,6.0,0,0,0,2,6,6,0,1,4,0,7,3,1,1,0,11,15,3,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,4,0,13,1,7,9,2,11,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,8,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21662566370616015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21252496970771134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18137059453951013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18403930167884366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20338859268256465,0.0,0.0,0.21921674901663496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820141563950088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446392165721541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4470739915833293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505337884313704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21487777455277515,0.21807956358073646,0.0,0.0,0.21789590869064074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17880234617380508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20501631778456636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712017535499874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312120760324954,0.0,0.16256912623641487,0.11940642655165072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17686055923255015,0.0,0.0,0.1207820833308416,0.3250830264476449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454668661824701,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,appilappi,2020/03/23,"Why would I get rid of the only good thing in my life, my female friend? What is wrong with me?",-0.03142857142857025,1.5408489523809552,1.4288095238095266,103.52035714285715,83.28571428571429,4.2,10.5,3.1291,-2.077971428571429,72,0,19,0,2,23,20,21,0.11699999999999999,0.64,0.243,0.5204,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,12,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262977823249853,0.0,0.22065450579557014,0.0,0.0,0.3542376099471357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.298310268468293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32120756379648524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805830231770118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38109492819277296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30001724935011964,0.461760998364017,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,w-hy_,2020/03/23,"Invisible, ""invalid"" struggles with anxiety/depression My family is very odd about mental health issues. Whenever I try talking to them about mental heath, they just shrug it off, blaming the fact that I'm female, that there are a lot of things going on, etc. 

These are not the reasons why I feel like this. I'm not just ""on and off"" anxious, I've actually been told by an actual doctor I probably have restless leg syndrome- which can be a common symptom of anxiety, but my mother quickly dismissed that possibility. I've never really spoken to my doctor about my mental health issues because my parents- in the past- have been extremely specific about avoiding talking about these things. Currently, all the information my doctor gathers goes directly to my parents. So talking to my doctor about these things would probably just end up going to my parents too. They're not abusive or anything- they're just... Odd, about mental health topics.

I have anxiety attacks- or yes, since I'm not diagnosed, suspected anxiety attacks- multiple days a week, and I'm actually scared of directly speaking to my doctor because I break down easily. I'd probably have a ""suspected"" anxiety attack right there on the spot. 

Just to further go into detail about these things- I'm constantly terrified of talking to people, or talking to people I don't know, or talking in front of people. I'm literally shaking, I'm breaking into a cold sweat, I stammer, it's pretty bad. Nope- my parents, or specifically my mother, do/does not see anything wrong with that. They just think I'm being a ""girl."" Because I'm female, haha, thanks a lot for making what could take over my life a joke.

I'm pretty sure it's because treatment would cost money, and my parents hate spending money. I'd offer paying for it myself- but they'd still be upset over me actually talking to a professional about my problems. I'm unable to get an actual diagnosis because my parents are constantly looking over my shoulder, getting upset over me reaching out to someone for help. They're good parents- but I can't go on until I'm legally able to do this without them having to deal with me. I'm sure as soon as I turn eighteen, they'd care less about this because it isn't their responsibility anymore. Laws are dumb, I'm stuck in a home where I have good parents, who are just a bit frustrating when it comes to something that has become a big deal to me. 

Also, I should probably add this little fact: They care a LOT more about my brother, because he's male. Because his gender isn't as prone to being like this. Whenever he feels sad, they're constantly all over him, asking if he's depressed or has anxiety, giving him a ton of attention while I'm the elephant in the room watching. I want the best for my brother- if he's actually going through anxiety and depression, I want him to have all the help and support he needs. However, he's actually able to reach out and get that help and support because my parents are feeding him from the palms of their hands- I'm not able to get help because my parents always think I'll get over it. They think I'm just going through a phase where I THINK I'm depressed or have anxiety. Guess what? People do develop depression or anxiety when they're teenagers. Younger generations have higher depression and anxiety rates than older generations- and that's diagnosed depression and anxiety. Anxiety disorders develop earlier in women than in men. Females are also more likely to have depression or anxiety. 

Oh, and where do I get that information? Google? That's literally the only place I can get information, if you're not going to believe me based on that, I'm not going to try to stop you. I'm helpless, and that's the only source I have.  

Younger people suffering from anxiety or depression are often hidden, or told they're faking it. This is what I'm saying. Females suffering from anxiety or depression are described as ""overreacting."" Combine those- yep. That's what's happening to me. I'm being told that. 

The only sources I have are Google and my actual real-life experience. I'm shaking right now, because I'm afraid when I post this, I'm just going to be told the exact same things, or that I shouldn't be reaching out to the internet for this. I can't do anything but this, this is what I'm doing. I've reached out to my friends, they're supportive, but they're not doing much more than what my parents are doing. I can't blame them, though. I shouldn't even be reaching out to Reddit, or them. I should be trying to get professional help, I know that. But I'm scared to do that, and I'm scared to talk to my parents about it. I'm on the verge of breaking down right now. I've been surviving on my faith, and music. Those are the two things that have kept me from giving in and letting my problems take over and drown me. I'm already drowning in a sea of comments telling me that I'm overreacting, or that since I'm young, I should be happy. Older people don't have to go through this, because older people are supported by older people. Who is in control of the younger generations? Older generations. I'm forced to live by what older generations think, I'm forced to yield to the ""You don't know what you're talking about"" comment. I'm forced to yield to society.

I'm not seeking attention- I'm seeking help. I don't want to get into any trouble, or to get my family into any trouble. I just need some sort of help that can suit my situation.",4.498443880786301,6.358896206698568,5.6934467054822155,76.66822332391773,71.14354066985645,8.634230702715168,31.34634230702715,9.208627347671394,3.0157639361272843,4356,196,763,94,83,1450,341,1045,0.17600000000000002,0.696,0.128,-0.9958,14,1,1,0,0,0,150.0,0,2,12,3,43,58,6,11,37,3,77,18,5,3,9,135,175,55,2,18,46,16,3,3,1,7,12,2,2,4,63,31,1,6,18,1,5,14,24,38,0,1,9,9,86,20,129,145,17,95,1,13,3,0,83,49,1,26,31,492,149,9,0.09669238195581932,0.03818822045411362,0.25162084465359097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035567482632213085,0.05154990861071553,0.026818602550820476,0.0,0.0,0.043836090302011584,0.0,0.34519056850839874,0.03641162307259358,0.031964286960692895,0.0,0.0,0.07956959162475978,0.0,0.03013144153886082,0.11000154344022883,0.0,0.0,0.02691136669653888,0.2357711142961012,0.03559637971185633,0.0,0.036313067675271454,0.033824229805576415,0.0,0.03518767932946322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572288507560299,0.0,0.0,0.02776397510877509,0.0,0.10449011429623467,0.03614957609452405,0.02573366635366453,0.0,0.0,0.020786195733441943,0.0664570666988038,0.2776033563127065,0.06542715488433748,0.0,0.0,0.03693928225216115,0.16494791689803412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028546916864461806,0.0,0.03594585511919783,0.021288135451415217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031527901122071975,0.06076864820421739,0.0,0.032593715731912234,0.023025685663096256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02490143148108065,0.0,0.16839259580341226,0.0618374289848883,0.1831750298076957,0.05406732163036787,0.0,0.0,0.03550585330662221,0.0,0.02850158467734525,0.034310279526502084,0.0,0.031821236298568166,0.0,0.10277948047941192,0.0,0.0,0.15122535268644938,0.0,0.032330114305539656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728115019491547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05313960439867167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03295817055304443,0.022765562969617428,0.047239013702746614,0.03230372290663724,0.028460381584515474,0.0,0.02706574941473657,0.0,0.0,0.0822044053865373,0.0,0.0,0.021514305261386764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299242382940248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023693342101862528,0.047797450690344655,0.024858375286864968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353891360300449,0.0,0.0,0.42946178956004816,0.0,0.03076793984930055,0.1787581945116649,0.0,0.033674319739799924,0.0,0.0,0.03633537745261036,0.030868191223531693,0.06558060932524169,0.1390009890054569,0.0616810339601988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03668569977404098,0.02064787194361384,0.03313862424801868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257476587207052,0.0,0.025631221026434708,0.09680594246019013,0.0,0.025683769871298136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05332329169690575,0.03622876285677778,0.0,0.0,0.02730904715084212,0.02481283986398744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025739553710852976,0.02694638697110801,0.0,0.03369462392904613,0.0,0.0,0.14630049224919564,0.0607542837906819,0.033500135901303185,0.048467091810244736,0.2331530219212686,0.02817113457287916,0.02967378475790058,0.0,0.0,0.12847624418307585,0.10326095681671037,0.03166659144585148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319161949304228,0.0,0.06564778029335444,0.03505784855049655,0.031484802406075416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02659378051966225,0.05703167209077418,0.0,0.02585359880346281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029083278392398174,0.0,0.0,0.03106933524323774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0457916626009642,0.03523931354809118,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,obviousthrowaway9641,2020/03/23,"What can I do for my client as a live in caregiver I am a live in caregiver taking care of two low functioning people with autism. One of them is nonverbal and attached to all female workers before me, but some are so surprised that he goes to the lengths he does with me. He follows you everywhere to the point you cannot sleep in your room because he is jiggling the door handle all night. This happens throughout the day when I need to use the restroom, shower, break time, etc. Every night at 4 am he is jiggling the doorknob loudly. Is it attention he wants? What can I do for him? He doesn't understand too much verbal communication, only short sentences like sit down, time for bed, time for dinner, stop.",4.7413138686131395,6.1598052116788375,5.08438686131387,83.01125182481755,69.87591240875912,7.815766423357664,29.028467153284673,8.238735603445708,2.0035962043795617,562,21,106,8,10,178,94,137,0.032,0.893,0.075,0.7093,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,3,1,1,3,4,0,0,8,0,13,2,1,1,2,13,21,5,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,5,3,1,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,1,12,3,18,21,5,20,0,1,0,0,12,9,0,1,9,68,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218098255126067,0.0,0.1705521655257689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20435293861883108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926152514299366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17539866992341788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22353373916330416,0.0,0.0,0.1688719075367155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772406240964312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792054681822387,0.0,0.3539687951506526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733997385072814,0.14861717491288914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3761821560232295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13581734983018529,0.15243693862316265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895373852134627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18947224329455148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20057592170938845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16756943510230046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069929791333525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35061908590210084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957921319526225,0.2086559193797025,0.0,0.1731081801905852,0.0,0.0,0.11821949865904045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LonelyGrumpyGhost,2020/03/23,"Nervous reaction to sirens... What’s going on with me? Hi there, this is my first time posting here (or actually in general) so I’m really really sorry if this doesn’t belong here. I want to ask about the reaction I have to hearing sirens. To give a bit of background, I’m 17 and I have anxiety, I take medication for it and I see a shrink. About a year ago there was a terrorist attack in my country, and missiles were being launched rather close to my city, and when the sirens sounded I was home alone. Naturally I was freaking out, but I talked to my parents over the phone and that really helped. Ever since then, I get really nervous when i hear similar sounding sirens. The worst example in recent memory is when I started getting very anxious and crying and all after hearing a siren in a movie. It was very realistic, in the sense that I thought it was coming from outside, though any siren I hear (that sounds like... a missile siren? I guess) makes me very nervous. Can anyone help me understand what’s going on with me? Is this normal? Is this just an associative response and not that big a deal?",3.327700442695523,5.448879172897197,4.627865223807183,81.94401623216923,75.02803738317758,7.869749139203148,27.151008362026573,8.6894789155246,2.190442990654205,869,34,164,18,19,287,124,214,0.156,0.816,0.027999999999999997,-0.9775,1,1,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,1,14,7,1,3,14,0,15,1,0,2,2,29,36,17,0,4,6,1,0,1,0,0,1,7,1,0,13,13,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,6,0,1,7,8,22,1,23,28,3,27,0,0,1,0,13,11,0,3,13,115,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.1185782571276536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771312310024644,0.0,0.0,0.1258498638464289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826323780044395,0.0,0.09295640498188333,0.137274058008392,0.0,0.08496406831932628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359738744509168,0.13823752766272054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265971483400193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046718934233455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347530890729106,0.0,0.12527361401730225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991462877163698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335810914297236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12697008819637207,0.116565454891115,0.13811622523598466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13385925029305593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5478117601934431,0.0,0.16289396536635328,0.0,0.1218865189763284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05936466216077563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811102537937893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224106321072984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905603429985255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349247795933133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637497906053652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113749876281581,0.0,0.11997851499475932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682939176200904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005160443274639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602281991513887,0.08600687228931947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136195823230693,0.09766680329960167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938499699393465,0.09646701472712464,0.07085466825921373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649835570073412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007805635942388,0.07167097025855332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824979253853671
mentalhealth,radfox53,2020/03/23,"Mental health effects of Self Isolation I'm currently in self isolation with my wife and three sons (5, 2 and 7 months) in Melbourne. Just starting day 6 with 8 more to go, none of us had been outside our apartment. Without formal structure or ability to understand what is going on they are crawling up the walls. They need to run outside and explore new environments. They take up earlier and earlier, and can not control their emotions any more. There is no space for anyone to move to, to be in their own. I fear that we will come out of isolation, only to be told to get back inside. It's unbearable.",4.382289272030654,6.0819839913793095,5.203908045977013,80.70967432950194,71.15517241379311,8.603831417624523,31.854406130268195,9.150863307647796,2.927263601532568,477,22,88,10,9,155,87,116,0.11599999999999999,0.865,0.019,-0.8876,1,3,0,0,0,0,15.0,3,0,5,2,3,1,0,1,1,0,9,1,0,2,0,19,19,6,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,10,0,1,3,0,0,6,4,1,0,1,3,0,10,0,22,13,4,22,0,0,0,0,13,10,0,1,6,61,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13933280635127196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14326444868035754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15754841914377732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649532796929096,0.0,0.0,0.2298025143646424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213765027646174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304746325738833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305591731768049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704701436837846,0.0,0.2328883874519526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21778939608679904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064817894323842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635419244492994,0.2177665517225229,0.0,0.15192397166899382,0.0,0.19788486301564107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558287267825396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4274916903616849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502280063781414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540524228114445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19578199087403533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21329860430324016,0.24645846915235325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19750747117655887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,toxxicwastee,2020/03/23,"I don't think I can survive till the end of all this Coronavirus stuff. As someone who is heavily depressed (on the verge of offing myself but not completly there yet), hearing the news just now is going to push me over the edge. I live in the Netherlands and literally a few minutes ago we heard that cause of this corona bullshit we're going to have to stay inside until june 1st. Now I understand that it's serious blah blah whatever I really get that. However as someone who relies on other people for happiness and distractions I don't think I can make it till that time.

In the time that I've already been in quarantine which is only because of my mothers doing, I've already gone downhill mentally fast. And I've only been here a week. I've developed suicidal thoughts, an eating dissorder and major anxiety and panic attacks already. Now hearing that this is going to last until june 1st I don't think I'm going to be able to last until june 1st.

I seriously don't know what to do, I have plenty of people who care about me but I don't think that's going to be enough to be able to stop me from actually trying it. I don't even know what I want to hear from any of you guys so I guess everything is welcome. Sorry for errors I'm typing this crying after hearing the news. I've also never posted anything on reddit before so sorry if this is wrong in any way.",4.860488888888888,5.54678399636364,6.3305151515151525,76.88732828282829,69.03636363636363,9.020202020202019,29.459595959595962,9.150863307647796,2.5360262626262617,1089,39,201,20,18,372,143,275,0.179,0.77,0.051,-0.9873,1,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,1,0,1,13,10,1,2,10,0,23,1,0,2,2,28,49,18,1,2,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,1,23,6,1,1,8,0,0,7,8,7,0,0,5,5,21,3,39,41,4,42,0,1,0,0,13,9,0,2,23,140,44,1,0.19714822981624872,0.0,0.09619411666330466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738000524429726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32633696100528603,0.07882968407818025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340675567759145,0.0,0.07540892809549779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111809751046832,0.0,0.0,0.11214228632926508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008986551613664,0.0,0.08387931146019079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050287976920663,0.10126276950028304,0.0,0.0,0.1033530840301498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827903654273123,0.0,0.0,0.08490174072830199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008659286057762,0.0,0.0,0.08730740746119682,0.10185341122196168,0.0,0.06510727322219699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859205838380073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0515009065429396,0.0,0.2801097057182829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859050091527953,0.09760387155931194,0.0,0.10493397829791704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4444007665996388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083475112353808,0.1607021203239583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704274942537762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579898714171975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933952294812827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602643431856937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994011261473367,0.0,0.11565548486514067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667775927745573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440675367987172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314910214461418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16704305535312036,0.0,0.0,0.22069130251598365,0.0,0.1050668907887331,0.0,0.08241237391987502,0.0,0.0,0.11284377791943632,0.10782408248323018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526492503392674,0.0,0.07825683640156718,0.1149587182299215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692535344777452,0.0,0.0,0.1026191300222344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05814156694006335,0.07824354416669439,0.07907020908034561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777532022823144,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Phoenix_Crown,2020/03/23,I am so loaded my mental health is breaking Due to corona virus I am getting online school via WhatsApp .. Fucking WhatsApp and I am not understanding a single thing i can't understand anything and I don't know what to do I tries studying alone but I can't and .......,1.2148626373626392,3.8487709807692334,2.964835164835165,87.03730769230772,89.19230769230771,4.509890109890111,24.736263736263727,6.1826913282559595,0.9664802197802196,209,9,38,2,7,69,36,52,0.034,0.966,0.0,-0.128,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,8,2,0,0,0,8,13,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,8,0,2,13,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,28,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042676533372359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24175604557999103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271595030291635,0.1534880118212708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122745795233748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145389665554594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960613102969161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29732121297131536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19517448883704447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19945744901733176,0.0,0.0,0.6116710286957294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Greenblueshoelace,2020/03/23,"I’m going down hill again and I don’t know what to do I’ve struggled with mental health any whole life, been medicated for 11 years now (I’m almost 18) and I recently started cutting again after 4 years clean. I’m suicidal but going to the hospital doesn’t fix it or help, been inpatient in many different hospitals 13+ times, all it is is them basically keeping you till your insurance runs out then kicking you out. I feel like I just wanna be gone and don’t know what to do",3.8332653061224486,4.885241102040818,5.402653061224491,81.26377551020407,71.65306122448979,9.273469387755103,28.285714285714285,9.606745405546679,2.4930448979591846,380,14,78,9,7,129,70,98,0.061,0.846,0.09300000000000001,0.6059,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,1,0,4,3,1,1,1,0,10,3,0,0,1,16,21,7,1,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,4,6,0,1,3,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,3,1,8,1,12,17,2,19,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,12,47,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297357253523185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15601668275228206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23970001081516096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160040362183136,0.16390107194793366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607747207084811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438677581101849,0.0,0.0,0.1537785595100395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20392324020281627,0.0,0.0,0.25217166171922895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620494707003975,0.11208533369978206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326006651580681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311212773516529,0.23120616514950215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265292414799148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16238800374059031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398445397743059,0.0,0.2509534159402864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377940422726334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25614451624447426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954840064571509
mentalhealth,riasisalba,2020/03/23,"Wanted to kill myself, changed my mind, just to have the system fuck me over again. Is it that hard to grasp the concept of mental health? Stopped antidepressants because copay was adding up, and became suicidal. Had a combo of drugs and alcohol and got in my car, wanted to slam into a tree and end it all. Changed my mind but ended up with a DUI/DWI. The process to get my license back required an alcohol evaluation. And this evaluation took my depressive and PTSD symptoms as alcoholic symptoms. I told the truth about my symptoms hoping for help but was slapped into an alcoholic treatment program. My insurance doesn’t cover. So instead of spending money and getting the psych help I need, my money is spent on alcoholic treatment when I don’t even drink.

During group, I realized the problem here is mental health, not alcohol. 12 weeks of thousands of dollars to tell us alcohol is bad. No fucking shit? I spoke up about this and others agreed just to have the staff shut me down and continue with their curriculum. You’re not helping anyone, this is why people re-offend multiple times. 

I know I fucked up but sometimes people do crazy shit as a cry for help. My mind was fucked at the time but now I’m owning up to my shit.

I hope an OASAS provider reads this post and consider again when you push for certain people to go into treatment. Is alcohol is really the problem or is it something else they needed? All these people reoffend and no one realized it’s because this system isn’t working out and left it unchanged for the last 10 years?",4.8405208487906215,6.720520566552903,5.245837661374093,80.1423252708117,70.29692832764505,8.09906514319632,30.8278676361478,8.716276077567194,2.632183973883365,1238,53,217,22,23,394,164,293,0.209,0.7140000000000001,0.077,-0.9934,0,0,11,0,0,1,30.0,1,1,2,2,15,16,8,0,17,0,18,22,3,0,4,48,38,22,2,8,9,0,1,0,0,0,14,1,0,0,13,18,9,2,4,2,5,4,7,12,0,2,9,2,25,4,38,29,3,38,0,1,0,4,12,16,7,3,15,149,38,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6234672436325971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05099004321587836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05607393023692942,0.06088835884564001,0.08890738979416532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542875028672357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010341199595528,0.0,0.0,0.0628091949640597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714375990166717,0.0845685004970326,0.0,0.060918509412949275,0.0,0.1291777513628509,0.0,0.0,0.048165507353703715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696676532560549,0.07619939125236365,0.0,0.04144429776554684,0.0,0.05832385510820352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06532543530352161,0.0,0.0,0.15502925981592125,0.0,0.0,0.1955172462415347,0.0,0.0,0.1448596511595217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067942237549203,0.0,0.04007703433803191,0.059442661127916,0.0,0.0,0.07923196354976028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698015402187758,0.0,0.2208968649228138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814420398480873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049415080031365334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20222482969296415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984087896122944,0.0,0.0,0.13955652910863547,0.0852440644125751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294357240159298,0.0,0.04671687805670882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22456581582977056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056140333363752085,0.0721235406131093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06096759402789152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976684294592441,0.0,0.0,0.22738736970931264,0.0,0.0,0.06373864881351005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504495295600696,0.0,0.0,0.06968185245895192,0.08102106742876886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771839844954303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602473829460676,0.0,0.05849510428613465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658024213757876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05308942271035673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04696056088295774
mentalhealth,dogarebetter,2020/03/23,"I don't know if this belongs here but I don't know where else to put it Yeah I'm not sure if this is where this belongs and if there is a subreddit for this can you please tell me where I could put this.

So for as long as I can remember I love doing things to hurt people or anything really. At the age of 2 I would rip apart ants and have little piles of ant bodies and other bugs I would kill. And I did that for years but fast forward to when I was about 9-10 I tortured my sister's fish until it eventually died, the reason I did it was because my fish did and hers didn't. When I was around 10-11 I frauded my grandma's credit card because she was always mean and I thought she deserved it. But in those years (I'm 16 btw) I would be very mean and very hurtful towards my sister and others and do some stuff that is illegal but I've never felt bad about doing any of that, even now I could do something and think about how I could've hurt that person even more then I already did.

I don't know what is wrong with me and I can't get any help because my mom believes there's nothing wrong with me. I think I'll get worse if I don't see someone about it. If this is the wrong sub just let me know.",1.6303078037298562,2.8074369049429686,3.0684302009777302,95.36972116603295,77.28897338403041,5.769980083288067,21.269056672098497,5.916634753146586,-0.07641828716277388,938,23,225,5,21,307,133,263,0.204,0.7290000000000001,0.067,-0.9921,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,19,12,2,0,4,1,33,2,1,2,2,47,49,29,2,10,12,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,21,14,0,0,12,0,1,3,8,9,0,0,11,2,35,3,22,31,2,23,0,3,1,1,11,10,0,7,12,155,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11715083719233235,0.0,0.08833410488015599,0.0,0.0,0.14438566629025995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736110986809141,0.09450542138180004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863964793600612,0.19414350820924756,0.0,0.0,0.11960661717810113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11792046948499912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542817484611256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017791891821364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08868354032729459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023612051409806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193080266355012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109290403223136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115719737249919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34094128184401506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745095007690512,0.0,0.23337230836181436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855638315880957,0.0,0.0,0.10640078810396822,0.0,0.0939487704659606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581406603756756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312799820148149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12433398538246968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08187758200969457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186393733967414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359837761987363,0.09269532152489024,0.0,0.11653243474261216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21344140440103807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800918438471787,0.10915075475545263,0.0,0.0,0.12025923961270245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459623566253385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994951286624035,0.08172759914565074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152846261561033,0.0,0.0,0.10005508799563964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09278902400817172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052837053913505,0.13604682305407434,0.0,0.0842796403345665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751871890514912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818669809002138,0.22624028521798606,0.34820977860010344,0.0,0.13672786268046447
mentalhealth,Unable-Vacation,2020/03/23,"How can I help a friend of mine who is really unstable? Long story short, I met this friend of mine in college, but I have moved away and can't be there for him. He's definitely improved, but keeping in contact with him is getting agitating to me with how he's thinking and behaving. I try to help him, he constantly complains and only says he'll think about it with suggestions I give him.. one time I got annoyed and tried to really dig into what he said, (not aggressively, but make him explain his reasonings) and he would deflect. He said he's tried therapy, but claims they don't work. He's on medication for anxiety. He's had a bad upbringing with a drug abusing mother and a father that left, so he was raised by a family member... but regardless, through the time I've known him, he definitely didn't have the maturation one would have by his age (28). To  make things worse for him, he's has financial burdens, and the way it seems to me, he works only to pay it off and doesn't enjoy what he's doing at his job. I've tried to get him to slowly interact with others, or take on some activity outside, but he deflects. The reason I'm writing this is due to the current COVID19 situation... he doesn't care of it... doesn't care if he gets it (doesn't have suicidal tendency, but he claims all humans are trash along with himself)...  
What can I do to help him?... just listening to his complaints is starting to make me want to give up on him as he hasn't improved with this mindset the past year. I would never befriend someone who thinks like him. If he was a mentally stable friend of mine, I would be berating him with how ignorant, short sighted, and naive he was, but obviously doing so won't help this friends case. How do I respond that would help? Those with anxiety and/or depression.... what helps you?",5.444476699770816,5.796473204481792,6.240597147950092,79.22314171122997,67.65546218487395,9.964298446651387,31.91354723707665,9.910423181423305,2.9424577030812316,1422,56,285,31,22,469,177,357,0.14,0.7070000000000001,0.153,0.8053,2,0,1,0,0,0,63.0,0,1,1,2,9,15,2,0,12,0,36,2,0,9,3,62,62,27,1,9,13,2,0,1,4,7,2,4,0,1,20,20,0,2,8,0,1,1,11,7,0,2,9,5,35,8,45,44,2,26,0,1,1,0,70,13,0,5,12,182,55,5,0.0,0.11324150718676865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623020913522056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08979646186543655,0.0,0.07980166891603876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19489147370893944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032833151891365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823191604508771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083740152200383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010020931214698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953660158544377,0.0,0.14980298469878,0.1833697296059579,0.0,0.0,0.07644057194990657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38437402931561737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484407717293684,0.08495202209115041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384321473986284,0.0,0.0,0.04669343099436663,0.0,0.0,0.08458143562580711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19139244967985086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962824042997006,0.09631776755732142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158178194904643,0.0,0.0,0.07371382720180356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952905714274965,0.14537916516757968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123776494778554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224564073051671,0.19653535625996404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18182864438618168,0.07600558668499056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700847495390608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743102612867647,0.0,0.0,0.08098093135583034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764893136941204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454423985027696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718609882875596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092990761860608,0.0,0.06349620972112982,0.18372303675458385,0.0,0.0,0.11146185095874583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25955834881310064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0563729899616654,0.07586349598078754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916041142826388,0.0,0.09739974450634456,0.33947096957241113,0.0,0.0,0.061547579910862085
mentalhealth,ResurrectedGorb,2020/03/23,"My medicine is not working, I need help. Is there an online service that can prescribe me or send me in a new medication? I have a doctor's appointment today at 2:30, I've been needing to get in for months. With all this Coronavirus bullshit the governor of my state might shut shit down. The press conference is about to start. If the appointment gets cancelled for this reason I'm fucked. Is there a service online where I can talk to someone and have them phone in a prescription? I called the doctor's office and they won't do a telephone/live chat appointment.",5.0758333333333345,6.6702539907407425,5.080555555555558,82.68250000000003,69.27777777777777,8.362962962962964,30.16666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.433866666666667,453,18,84,8,8,141,75,108,0.157,0.843,0.0,-0.9470000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,1,4,2,2,0,10,0,12,5,1,1,1,11,19,4,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,1,10,0,13,16,1,13,0,0,0,1,8,7,2,3,4,57,13,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346139470709092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4703448039576946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21241240393514702,0.24008360927056724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15400544998072355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314622820766971,0.0,0.2437424780262891,0.0,0.0,0.1833948182511883,0.0,0.0,0.3407330477008235,0.0,0.22190675944176988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362348676248699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23584865398133306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946776393116632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16262759689791687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18467498113273664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21778867669012347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727036802932327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bmdthrowaway68,2020/03/23,"I have potentially the worst therapist ever I'm so frustrated. I've been seeing her since January and she talks over me constantly, spends half the sessions talking, and doesn't make an effort to actually learn and retain information about me. My grandma died in the beginning of March and I had to cancel my appointments 2 weeks in a row so I could go home. I told her I was on bereavement leave via email and she never replied. The day I got back to my city, I emailed her telling her I needed to come in ASAP (her books aren't super filled up, it's easy to schedule with her). NO REPLY. Last week she emailed all of her clients saying she is doing strictly telephone and skype appointments for the foreseeable future. Then, she called me today and left a voicemail saying she's ready to schedule my phone appointment. I feel really disrespected and I don't feel like she values my time, and she hasn't made an effort to remember anything about me - she forgot I was a veteran, forgot I was going through a divorce, etc. I've also asked her to primarily contact me through e-mail, because I can't have my phone at work, and she literally has not once e-mailed me back since January. I am so livid, especially because I could've really benefited from a phone call when my grandma passed, but she can't even reply to my e-mails. Her practice feels really impersonal, and a waste of $30/week. I'm beyond unimpressed. I'm also about to move back home. I really don't feel like calling her and telling her I won't be seeing her again, so should I just e-mail her? Thanks for letting me vent.",4.373762541806023,5.763634525641031,5.43376811594203,80.26630434782611,70.73076923076924,8.759420289855072,28.949832775919727,9.20300075937882,2.45416204013378,1260,48,243,26,23,416,165,312,0.11699999999999999,0.851,0.032,-0.966,0,0,0,0,1,0,39.0,0,0,0,4,18,8,1,0,13,0,23,0,0,2,3,35,45,21,1,3,3,0,4,2,0,2,0,2,2,0,1,14,0,3,7,1,1,6,11,3,0,1,10,8,57,5,30,30,3,35,0,0,2,0,45,9,0,0,22,159,58,4,0.0,0.0,0.10681011998904863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17505868980657002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007030813228134,0.0,0.10232356991375506,0.0,0.0,0.25248728438284035,0.0,0.13344279189899175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352905635591245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428387435305924,0.0,0.1182795663426602,0.0,0.17477826972734947,0.0,0.0,0.07058798529863687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359470044875952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206877704988847,0.07229252584503885,0.09900630159382233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22137044761977695,0.15638616915963546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244090691433314,0.0,0.08753938314879776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195801158199516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921862037766562,0.0,0.11589468536261302,0.1189207606723938,0.11192287844789936,0.0,0.10694619472566116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356686249366746,0.07306057746092841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633097848617124,0.0,0.08115784605102648,0.08441672789957247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656363359571435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28047300235108624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398865792828333,0.0,0.0,0.1740824801422665,0.0,0.0,0.17443938211088522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18108093364676686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759479896579534,0.1913330999647078,0.10076941009824496,0.0,0.1270831082534017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382279350255288,0.0,0.10374843305480227,0.10458681734267264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633892428886743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796829240311435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,catscarscalls,2020/03/23,"I just don’t feel normal Maybe I am normal I don’t really know. Btw sorry if this isn’t the right sub.

I don’t want to go to a mental health professional (especially during this crisis) if I am not sure I have a reason to. 

Since I was a kid I have always had very low self-esteem and what I would describe as social anxiety. I vividly remember my first day of kindergarten thinking I would never make friends because how could people be friends with me. After school and when I was at home during the day I was fine but had a lot of anxiety about nighttime because I used to be scared of dying and my family dying and would make up rules to myself like praying for an hour or not touching them for a month to keep them safe and those sort of stuff. Anyway so far this is only kid-stuff which I outgrew but I want to put out there because lately I’ve been trying to figure out myself and I think any information might be helpful. 

Now, as an adult I feel miserable. I realized that the only times I felt okay was when I was daydreaming but in real life I don’t have goals or hope for me. I’ve have had suicidal ideation since I was a kid, I guess I never was suicidal since I never attempted it but I always sort of knew I was gonna die by my own hand and I always always have a plan. The plan changes according to my circumstances but it’s always there. I know I have low self-esteem, I hate myself. I don’t hate my life, I just hate me. I desperately seek approval from others and the minimum sign of validation used to make my day but at the same time any kind of rejection can throw me in a spiral for weeks. I say used because I am at a point in my life where nothing really makes me feel good anymore. 

I want to give you some of the reasons for which I hate myself. Among other things I hate that I am stupid: I’m in college, I used to be a good student in high school but I knew that it was a lie because I never learned anything. I have awful memory, I can’t remember anything (conversations, movies,...) that includes anything that I am supposed to learn. I have tried different studying techniques and I still forget everything. I’m a senior and I always have to review everything from the basics before studying a new topic. I’m so anxious about studying because I know it will take so much of my time and energy. Lately I don’t want to even put energy on it because I will forget it all the same. But now I feel like I’m being lazy for not focusing like I used to. It just takes so much more out of me now to focus. I need hours to finish a simple thing. 

I also hate that I can’t connect with people at all. It’s like any human interaction I ever had was through a layer of anxiety or mania or depression (it’s never normal, it’s never me). My emotions are way too strong and make me act different everyday according to them. I don’t know myself because I’m always feeling some kind of way (never a good feeling). 

It’s hard for me to explain this feeling so I’m sorry if it all reads like I’m rambling. I am. I don’t know what is it that feels off I just feel it. Maybe I’m just overly sensitive and the fact that I am a loser combines with that to create a not very good experience. Maybe this I how everyone feels. I literally have no idea. I have no social interaction usually and I have a hard time understanding people because of that. I could continue on and on but I’ll wrap it up because if someone reads this I think it will be more than enough effort to get to this part. 

I guess my question for y’all was if I should seek professional help. Would you think it would be beneficial. And if I do is any of the things that I said the stand out thing I should mention? I know a lot of that is filler and it’s normal, but I really couldn’t tell you if it is or not. So I guess I just need some help unscrambling this mess.",3.0278301886792462,4.228271106918239,4.7468081761006315,84.63002358490569,73.7798742138365,7.715094339622643,24.948113207547173,8.238735603445708,1.4387396226415097,3010,93,629,48,60,1022,283,795,0.154,0.7340000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.9906,2,0,0,0,0,0,67.0,0,4,3,9,30,34,7,2,34,2,75,5,1,14,13,158,142,52,5,28,33,0,15,5,2,12,4,2,1,4,51,24,0,2,36,2,0,5,26,15,0,1,20,18,110,19,80,100,17,71,1,6,1,0,29,28,0,25,40,449,161,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03651667200128611,0.2659668261271437,0.0,0.0,0.12420958054188075,0.0,0.10479617388168896,0.05158617474250865,0.04528541035884515,0.0,0.0,0.1127302358799392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783573136583866,0.0,0.03885583635281028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04830538263311247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291635457386364,0.0,0.0,0.08834654169627593,0.0,0.0393294614175905,0.0,0.14217290516529454,0.09541619932564532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05136471120335831,0.0,0.0471820692077845,0.0,0.030159970434426357,0.041304783502684864,0.0,0.04363293828807651,0.08207789174219207,0.044667160629043925,0.043046997642468735,0.0,0.2308857685225832,0.03262164506686333,0.0438436257851409,0.0,0.0,0.03884091106987381,0.0,0.0,0.07055821670792294,0.0,0.02385702459662615,0.0438040953417831,0.02595132624899753,0.15319977886857253,0.0,0.0,0.15090877570101355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181012951454951,0.2704964598168907,0.0,0.04853761695255607,0.0,0.0,0.09182080741040466,0.048245449924190234,0.04580369632756532,0.04535364658394424,0.08993768274263078,0.0,0.0,0.05154795109243618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04058735848228146,0.0,0.09510194255882737,0.1505710916974182,0.0,0.10301967033066868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967593485564403,0.11154313787272713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07764207255870757,0.0,0.0,0.15240198280434927,0.0,0.13762381558200953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04601754806810302,0.04844121021991538,0.0,0.0,0.03644775837222272,0.0,0.06713509493734619,0.06771704844474351,0.2465267593714585,0.04410159472564145,0.0,0.0,0.17896011755307298,0.04381486491834289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945751433886155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04944856210948779,0.0,0.09497089130388416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04316627969019015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180782272953122,0.05115299281667541,0.0,0.09135068258942834,0.05197447296765308,0.08775863092018453,0.09389830592151406,0.0,0.0,0.10345451936032622,0.038995939044938165,0.043435954732959865,0.036313037847761666,0.0457166131989265,0.09242675576793673,0.0,0.0,0.09527290258386394,0.0,0.0,0.11331867730140187,0.0,0.0,0.09309532392041243,0.03869009836683458,0.0,0.0,0.1022319447521858,0.0,0.0,0.03646651820148236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454638436920023,0.0998957867184853,0.0,0.04303682224950098,0.0,0.06866576264397226,0.0,0.039911460905600264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134583087156844,0.1170359860488588,0.0,0.0,0.10650581329558514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06200433780753877,0.0,0.0,0.047536776988257735,0.0,0.19719078617626504,0.05029132592548592,0.07535348842956711,0.1077328447738275,0.07249030290974316,0.03662809161072498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621883693548763,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vocarion,2020/03/23,"Struggling VERY HARD to not fall for a panic attack seeking online orientation  I am seeking badly for online help, because I am struggling VERY HARD to not fall for panic attack, and here in Brazil where I am I have no resources to find some help. I am 33 and overall healthy in quarantine for 6 days, and I am unable to distract myself due to this panic, I keep getting adrenalina rushes and the speed up of breathing that leads me to an infinite circle of ""I am missing breath"" sensation, even though my rational self evaluates that I am alright and I am even exercising. 

Is there anything I could do to leave this loop? I have no idea where I could ask for orientation.",11.01953125,7.573446265625003,10.3424375,66.5088125,59.0,12.740000000000002,43.56875,10.355215969177356,4.543835624999999,534,23,94,8,5,173,74,128,0.21600000000000005,0.6579999999999999,0.126,-0.9003,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,7,11,2,6,3,1,14,3,2,1,0,14,18,6,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,5,0,1,2,1,0,4,4,10,0,1,0,2,16,1,17,16,1,13,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,1,4,72,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499107560035636,0.0,0.14199499622012196,0.3455895889759768,0.0,0.0,0.12682033175960108,0.09258965821496763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425407926073373,0.0,0.0,0.09795534610563447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200641493309147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882309500455078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07935533377573027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27212404914822885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20361496436400148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714633292943742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13500524201547542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608277098215693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5346243524945513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845255458625696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175731231625782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922941960339506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25064740161853943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Unitmonster555,2020/03/23,"Locking yourself away for a few weeks may be the best thing you've done for yourself in your adult life If you’re like me, becoming an adult happened very quickly. You hit the ground running after high school and never really looked back. Obviously, no one would wish this pandemic on the world, and being in lockdown might actually have adverse effects on mental health for some. But maybe it’s possible that this is one of the first times since your teenage years that you have had the time or opportunity to really sit back and reflect on what’s important in life.

Maybe you’ve actually been given the opportunity to connect with people- like your roommate, your parents, or your SO, whether it’s physically or virtually. Maybe you always wanted to learn to play the guitar, but you’re always too busy. Maybe you fall in love with your dog again.

I know there’s a lot of doom and gloom out there in the news. It’s downright scary. It’s going to be a very different pace of life in the near future if we do what needs to be done. But maybe you’ll gain something you didn’t have before.",6.877714285714287,6.923875580952378,6.687380952380952,78.28678571428574,64.6190476190476,9.666666666666668,31.785714285714285,9.2995712137729,2.5778571428571424,872,30,168,14,12,275,127,210,0.073,0.812,0.115,0.7311,2,1,1,0,0,0,19.0,1,12,0,6,8,10,0,0,13,0,18,5,0,1,2,32,28,14,0,6,9,1,0,2,0,4,4,0,0,2,11,8,0,0,4,2,0,3,3,3,0,3,6,1,15,7,27,13,4,31,1,2,1,1,17,15,0,9,14,113,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.22498107533454695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19183396508059705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830346932759956,0.17727677475559828,0.0,0.0,0.1273107845515055,0.09808945882151836,0.0,0.120972673857731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043651910714505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359301077411824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805178075141578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551272051774337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019361838368468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253059067194767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179303079966294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335143050608387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442637458539081,0.11263384918387928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680090560773684,0.0,0.0,0.09800160791692578,0.10403904711219787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5790398070797329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161688129759422,0.12228721708591515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547401443921078,0.0889062114199336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562249333199213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799784183664298,0.0,0.0,0.0799162940603429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299538168744203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476946137634855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11666317476203099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535562542812062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874335355465772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658274790666532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344340846591252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190225808891518,0.06799143599184865,0.0,0.09246563762360392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255910719379674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818871545201663,0.0,0.0,0.07423250643274808
mentalhealth,AustinDeepspace,2020/03/23,"Ok, thanks mum I am an adult. 
But I do have Trauma freezing. Its a thing I had always. Sometimes, if I do something bad And my family starts to yell at me, I zone out. Freeze. Just blankly stare, because I am unable to come up with anything. My maximum is repeating 'ok' or 'yes'. I Just blankly agree with whatever they are saying.
Happened right now. I zoned out, stared, cried. Did not Feel anything. Maybe fear And despair. Got yelled at for wanting to go walk the dog. Made the mistake of wanting to go with a friend And bring Coffee (for myself only).
Now im sitting in bed, unable to stop crying. Because she was worried I would not have the safe distance from my friend and drink coffee. Now im not going anywhere anyways.
Thanks mum.

Austin",0.8712797619047628,3.4446206319444457,1.8342857142857163,94.125,92.68055555555556,3.8539682539682536,22.13492063492064,5.622346879071545,0.2472087301587305,577,22,112,4,21,180,97,144,0.177,0.71,0.114,-0.8404,0,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,0,6,12,0,1,6,3,12,1,0,1,0,26,26,7,0,5,8,2,3,0,2,1,0,3,1,1,2,10,1,2,1,1,0,6,3,5,0,0,5,8,16,7,18,20,0,20,0,1,2,0,8,7,0,2,6,70,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276096337795992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26259721822258725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322017661732136,0.19452418155973775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744087059189122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505231836123092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563012986151434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15041246581510295,0.17954159948007367,0.08067484300190828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24654066345581355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.272033116318869,0.0,0.12760919206601856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14109228220942832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3446894617676871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509730040610967,0.0,0.0,0.16029253753848155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134732470620785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625747833195956,0.0,0.1268830316409902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283177388693732,0.15780209880682286,0.0,0.11293250764577464,0.0,0.0,0.13339353857310365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937901215444637,0.0,0.0,0.10599999208637208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18821710826727245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203392117073004,0.0,0.1133419466965574,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,christian2cole,2020/03/23,"Sharing our Experiences I created this account to help people share their experiences during this time so others will feel less alone in the things they're feeling while stuck at home and how people are being affected in different ways like not having an income or lack of social interaction. If you could help by sharing the account in some fashion, submit your own story using the link on the account, or at least just give it a follow and some likes then I'd appreciate it a ton. 

https://instagram.com/ourstories_2020?igshid=75kwsm1uq6zj",10.857692307692304,11.520480043956047,9.01349450549451,62.85650549450551,56.25274725274725,10.796483516483518,34.683516483516485,10.355215969177356,3.707270769230768,448,15,64,8,5,135,72,91,0.073,0.69,0.237,0.9441,2,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,2,1,0,3,5,0,0,7,0,5,0,0,3,0,17,11,9,0,3,5,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,0,3,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,5,5,9,7,7,11,0,0,0,0,12,6,0,5,5,50,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479404946526531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911370210308619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501162901488208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4683474960007218,0.0,0.0,0.242090094886044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22964900923835735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209221616492977,0.0,0.2401321930976279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339121116410807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319319943983564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440325354996408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590430621693477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13959285262379398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067599767691889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19002020373574136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,poptropica_citizen,2020/03/23,"Depersonalization/ Derealization , how to deal with it??? Hey everyone! This is my first post on here lol. So I recently found out a word to describe something that I've been dealing with for years. Ever since I was little I would get moments that would make me doubt my reality and I would get this weird feeling of grief/nostalgia, sort of out of body experience. It would only last a couple of minutes and then I would go about life. 

Anyways I'm almost 20 now and I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety last year because of symptoms worsening. I always feel numb to daily events, cry over random things, or sometimes don't even cry when I feel I should. My anxiety comes with my depression and I often spend days in my room and when I leave for work or if I go to class I feel off.  People have noticed on my behavior, saying I always seem distant and withdrawed which I feel like I can't control.

Recently I read an article on Depersonalization/ Derealization and felt like they were describing my life. I have random moments in which I doubt my reality because I feel like I'm here but not here but I need to fight to stay in control. I notice if I'm not constantly thinking about being in control then I'm not present and just go through the day without fully being there. Anyways, if you have read this whole thing, I appreciate your time and if you have any tips, please share. I do have access to a therapist but she's not very good and I cannot afford a psychiatrist or medicine for that matter due to my financial state right now (thanks corona). 

Any support is appreciated because all I wish for is to be present and motivated to finish school and go to work.",3.832857142857143,5.9857717577639775,4.982577639751553,79.82274844720502,73.65838509316771,7.9540372670807455,28.27018633540373,8.738905477910976,2.306588819875776,1334,54,250,27,28,439,170,322,0.08800000000000001,0.8009999999999999,0.111,0.9034,1,0,1,0,1,0,31.0,0,3,1,7,18,14,1,2,6,1,25,6,1,6,2,71,51,29,0,12,16,0,7,3,0,6,5,1,1,0,12,20,0,3,11,2,1,5,8,7,0,1,6,8,41,7,39,36,2,47,0,2,0,0,11,14,0,15,28,171,53,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907859340919146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14804037513275015,0.0,0.0,0.12098898964562885,0.0,0.1361052627487463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16268392499068485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881229091568547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662944559640485,0.0,0.0961320019612362,0.29932190514674195,0.0,0.09843034202575413,0.1954323856740965,0.11474110957609812,0.18342359684233672,0.15323880104776866,0.09029050390108363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05875592421589267,0.08046760969193124,0.0,0.08500318728577386,0.0,0.08701799992030156,0.0,0.0,0.2698790454188798,0.1271032350322546,0.08541363658106299,0.0,0.0,0.0756676347630889,0.0,0.09753786237692193,0.0,0.0,0.0929537734304954,0.0,0.20222754020309205,0.07461375514826969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502529649588572,0.0,0.09419368420999397,0.0,0.0,0.1256673413815629,0.13038116539077066,0.08915929247657026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059380160013571576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596123453094757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20255855969439732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765657243582855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06167228075039649,0.0,0.0,0.09764917739209772,0.0,0.0,0.08519717982586111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779641593138918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17567059860747286,0.0,0.0,0.0759696513706326,0.0,0.07074297716805797,0.0,0.09003025167463173,0.0,0.08098402795839807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735869821252253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848421938862695,0.08798174293745603,0.0,0.0,0.0948173985372438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094849141391192,0.0,0.0924614300172645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190058036848928,0.0,0.10328710181827708,0.11819949323401943,0.05700069850673424,0.0,0.0,0.05187212888813331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339967168066294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931843722409232,0.102297317099124,0.08575234365433736,0.0,0.1295249762253506,0.0,0.0,0.31596607693079043,0.0,0.0,0.1145720789822723
mentalhealth,Armageddon-Jane,2020/03/23,"What has your process been like for accepting your past for what it was and how has that changed you moving forward? Does it feel better, worse, different, or something else to acknowledge that what happened wasn’t what you thought at the time? How has your shift in perspective changed you? <3",6.434433962264151,8.480993528301891,4.271839622641512,88.03530660377363,66.54716981132076,8.318867924528304,34.00471698113208,8.841846274778883,2.7779471698113207,239,11,44,4,4,66,38,53,0.052000000000000005,0.805,0.14300000000000002,0.6641,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,6,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,2,0,8,9,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,1,6,3,5,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,4,30,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386620419558993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5709349761475475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819377599171232,0.0,0.0,0.2361491822390817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22542660340128096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644520916587094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23862910966309744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183598864018506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868098224073521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576041358936187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077451465238264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142322350504488,0.1573527903591414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750021006561835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raspberrycream99,2020/03/23,"Crying I am either very emotional or I am quite stoic emotionally . However lately my brain has been telling me that crying or having a breakdown (tears) automatically means that I am a mentally weak human being . My biggest fear is other people potentially seeing me cry or visibly distressed , and for them to be of the impression that therefore because they've seen me get upset that now they are always going to see me as a weak person because of that one occasion where they saw me get upset. It's so annoying because on a rational level , I know that it's actually much healthier and more beneficial to unleash my emotions through the medium of crying , wether that be privately or publically , as opposed to forcing myself to not feel any emotion . I'm really just sick of all these thoughts and I do want to self harm but I'm trying my hardest to resist the urge to do so",10.42316883116883,7.9957068666666675,10.909523809523817,58.83000000000001,59.12121212121212,13.549783549783552,42.96536796536797,12.031772070788634,5.335718614718616,703,32,113,17,7,242,108,165,0.158,0.805,0.037000000000000005,-0.9441,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,3,1,5,9,1,4,7,0,13,4,1,1,1,19,27,12,0,1,8,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,11,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,8,0,1,4,5,18,1,17,20,4,7,0,0,4,0,8,4,0,4,2,85,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.12269496532996442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10461796246494882,0.0,0.0,0.08550114498202391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299326888771285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403569730597402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5524368057174674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5657201771906575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414819223767511,0.06357318809905863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137813749805335,0.0,0.07145561875054192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06909827022552277,0.0,0.141829635532387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13695752342850492,0.0,0.0,0.12670691043068086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242648530939256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519833389924421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716579307350618,0.10978314300149622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373000946312089,0.0,0.0,0.08054626589452837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20038207936167413,0.0,0.1311644757375951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098941189704282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981608192037976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536284968145799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037409435087063,0.07415918756143823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jacrod702,2020/03/23,Marriage counseler I was just curious on people’s thoughts on marriage counseling.  My wife and I will be attending.  The two counselors in my insurance network are clinical social workers.  What is the difference between social workers and therapist?,6.8264999999999985,10.782018650000005,7.000000000000004,59.12500000000003,75.0,11.2,48.0,10.355215969177356,7.722100000000001,206,16,22,8,5,66,32,40,0.0,0.94,0.06,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,4,6,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,0,4,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,20,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35500634493716826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355663520135989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6927425512503002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3945202851158097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26975387317873445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319236946615808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AlienNotOnBoard,2020/03/23,"I have a fear of being ignored and idk what to do about it I honestly don't know where to post this so I'll try here.

I had very few friends growing up and the ones I had always had a habit of ignoreing me, freezing me out, leaving me behind etc. I only had them as friends so when they ignored me I had no other choice but to be alone.

Even when I switched schools it kept happening with my new friends. It happened so often that I legit thought as a kid that this was how people normally treated their friends. This happened consistently for about 8 years.

I didn't think much of it until just recently.

I just broke down completely one day when a person started to ignore me intentionally on social media and that's when I realised that this was something odd that had been happening for quite some time.

Now I can't stress enough that I'm not a person to cry or get affected by people and I usually take a step back to think before acting in tough situations. I know that it doesn't make sense for me to react so hard when this is a person I basically have just spoken to a few times, I barely know, and who I honestly don't want as a friend.

But I still broke down crying and panicking and I have no idea about what. Maybe just the act of being ignored it self maybe??

It's like my body and mind are reacting two different ways. My mind knows this is too weird and illogical and something I shouldn't really care about, but my body is reacting as it does.

My fear has actually gotten worse over the years and now I burst out in tears, have trouble breathing, shaking and panicking by just the thought of being ignored and frozen out. I would rather poeple scream at me, forget about me, hit me until I'm nothing but blood and bruises than being ignored. 

Is this a trauma, fear, phobia.? Am I overreacting?

I tried talking to my psychiatrist about it but she doesn't seem to really take it seriously as well as other people I've talked to before. Is this really just nothing?

I mean, I have moved on from the past and I don't really care about those people who treated me like that before, but I still react the way I do and I really don't understand why. I have even started to avoid situations where I might feel like I might be ignored and I can't even seem to calm down when I'm left on ""read"" when I've sent a message to someone. 

Even now as I'm writing this, I'm panicking, shaking and am scared of posting this as I know that theres a risk that I might be ignored by people. It's not like I NEED a reply and want attention. I actually hate attention. I'm just scared and I'll probably delete this later if ever. Idk sorry, I feel like I'm writing whatever at this point as I'm starting to have trouble to think straight. Sorry

I'm just really confused of what to do as thinking about this logically, accepting and moving on obviously doesn't seem to work.",4.862264098008044,5.377003453287202,5.915927242121015,80.47213363882918,68.96539792387543,9.086018890863182,29.462452071448606,9.142720283898788,2.3192188721593565,2268,80,457,41,37,755,236,578,0.23199999999999998,0.6809999999999999,0.087,-0.9978,1,2,2,0,1,0,49.0,0,0,3,2,47,49,1,11,19,0,50,4,4,8,2,105,98,53,0,8,19,0,4,5,5,5,0,1,0,5,42,25,0,11,23,1,0,9,15,30,1,3,15,5,59,19,71,70,6,63,0,2,0,0,23,21,0,11,34,322,101,3,0.0,0.0,0.12482343233306442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623900681492054,0.0,0.0,0.05321641814498079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049178126349126335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16326523785506952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14208113662282415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041457052991767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670565266273309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405050689148529,0.041246253666577436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682028553222095,0.0,0.0,0.05596822429905945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660835237359492,0.07132771563981463,0.1689690304426161,0.057851757814758376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21590444787183088,0.06467603231753831,0.09138019134294766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470607831997635,0.0,0.033414309242294826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262239048600658,0.0,0.05729190904925205,0.06314319374195122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721984072922882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757424038270814,0.0,0.0,0.0677200457110486,0.0694882541294265,0.0,0.0,0.1562280697510922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042691048600281785,0.0,0.12850456167424873,0.06966670601441143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035412553401363,0.1291544203328155,0.0,0.0,0.13594996450520427,0.04701493294273903,0.04742247694266352,0.0,0.061768990440213625,0.0,0.0,0.06266318632627682,0.1227347894840104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667632317073512,0.04864133106624001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06105312718577512,0.221694782752661,0.16753143070995768,0.0,0.0,0.060458981905538375,0.0,0.12250411395730484,0.0,0.06895525912902169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802495417081013,0.0639731904784461,0.0,0.24583065841849874,0.0,0.06314871887410005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806199237061094,0.06472676814711949,0.0,0.17466910190011473,0.06671993434165438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14377818452010668,0.0,0.06519496867451326,0.05418961221287606,0.09847272683684308,0.0,0.14318674998867326,0.13580490972928191,0.0,0.10215050173075016,0.0,0.07326124801604762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617372937898472,0.10281063247312193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16392138988139024,0.0,0.1015476544928557,0.07458637951993571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868436929120579,0.0,0.062475604643409975,0.06658032984097609,0.0,0.0,0.07043836962455388,0.052770301566175175,0.07544567379399658,0.1015304062199077,0.0,0.0,0.0575040197070392,0.0,0.05771023680387091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046560644613646916,0.0,0.06517650879118983,0.04543242437612092,0.0,0.0,0.08237098369134753
mentalhealth,comeeonaileen,2020/03/23,"it’s nice to remember who i am without anxiety. today i took my natural medication for “stress relief” that the guy at my grocery recommended to me for anxiety. it’s my first time taking it and going to work. i feel absolutely amazing. i’m more likable, more social able, and less irritable. my brain still thinks little bad thoughts but almost immediately they are erased. i can have a conversation with someone i don’t know and not beat myself up for hours after it’s over. it’s a weird feeling though, i feel like i’m missing part of myself. but i’m comfortable with it being gone. i hope i feel like this every single day for the rest of my life. such a beautiful feeling.",2.4454220779220783,4.981454083333336,4.535627705627707,79.33772727272729,80.13636363636364,7.40779220779221,25.33766233766233,8.418075326091056,2.071457142857143,537,21,99,12,14,184,88,132,0.077,0.669,0.255,0.9721,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,3,3,11,0,1,5,0,6,3,1,0,0,20,23,6,0,1,4,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,9,5,0,0,9,0,0,3,3,4,0,1,3,5,17,7,16,19,6,14,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,2,9,69,26,1,0.16604402791337505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662691089451065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25404645374248336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386398276439888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18536004920836366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708466152442712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989925493721994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4197842478890758,0.2372437734369613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123696531948585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09436664754929593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16440969303912198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16491918529318786,0.1635199204723126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125345531471536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728180742050758,0.1622414496613215,0.16641973730049756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727188940501606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980950135778725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18809551527708207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926097604018314,0.1406885660177658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13260297517943612,0.0,0.19020287297056107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484444455661768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639430852289868,0.16313741437331378,0.1318204108653203,0.0968216079669901,0.0,0.1573903234432975,0.0,0.18448102456387436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600605176135397,0.0,0.120882029895765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yainegva,2020/03/23,"I am divorced and I still live with my ex-husband... ...and it’s kinda painful. He is my friend and helps me a lot, i live in a room in his apt and he helps me financially. But I have Dependent Personality Disorder, that’s why it’s hard for me to leave and live my own independent life. At the same time it’s painful to see how he doesn’t need me anymore, and now he has a girlfriend. 
Long lasting depression and troubles with self exploration led to absence of my own goals and dreams that i can pursue. Longing for love and inability to find one paralyze me so i’m stuck in his apt and in my nightmare. I don’t know what to live for but don’t want to end this all yet. Please, can you give me a kind advice or maybe talk to me? I need strength to move on but I don’t know how to find one and where to apply it.",1.8106650246305447,3.0739336954023035,3.4985221674876854,92.11655172413792,76.98850574712644,7.040394088669951,24.497536945812808,7.7094869923839395,0.9127123152709359,629,21,152,9,14,210,97,174,0.096,0.7609999999999999,0.14300000000000002,0.9053,0,0,0,0,1,0,20.0,0,1,0,2,7,8,0,0,5,0,10,4,0,5,1,34,20,18,0,3,4,0,1,0,2,0,3,0,1,2,8,13,0,0,5,1,0,3,4,4,0,2,1,2,23,4,22,19,5,19,0,1,1,1,17,8,0,4,8,97,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13664705894203025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386806890507631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044136878007845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026527111553893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385404078954605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556168962386529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803768844877652,0.0,0.0,0.13414435415527326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526644942054604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874595333606551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14561867519378938,0.15370147237457205,0.11398578622561945,0.0,0.14806714982263075,0.0,0.0,0.09877098034870864,0.0,0.0,0.4939143905999644,0.2475026184513949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11888438281169082,0.12620831603839325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048502172827204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148624558293005,0.0,0.20737466800864876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18951428626844724,0.0,0.2975927694493702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210023974670707,0.0,0.15349898987641805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143195240215814,0.0,0.14588044663280622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167397692524153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123956515527982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154005594021706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08247946208416729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618110619119274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LELISH,2020/03/23,"Help , my brother suddenly started saying he is god and his mood been different lately Sorry in advance for the long story. But I am in desperate need of help and advice before things turn ugly. 

My brother currently is a college student and About a month ago I got a call from a close friend of my brother and he told me that ( my brother) has been admitted to a mental institution. I later found out from calling the campus police that he was saying and asking kids very strange questions and he wasn’t in a normal state of mind and they think he might need help.

At the moment I was really confused because he has never had any kind of issue mentally. He is a normal kid who is very outgoing and rational. Never done anything strange. 

I managed to get a hold of him through a phone call and he sounded normal and he explained to me what happened. He said he didn’t do or say anything strange. At the moment I believed him because he never lies to me and he looks up to me as his older brother. So I told him to just remain calm so they can assess him and let him go. He agreed and 4 days later they let him go. 

The first few days home he seemed normal and wasn’t doing anything out of the ordinary. So after a week I thought maybe he can tell me actually happen so I called him and asked. He started telling me about how he found out some things that was going on with the school like how he found out that they were cutting money from kids that did work study and now he feel like they are trying to set him up and get him kicked out of the school because he knew about it. 

It sounded very convincing till I asked him what happened when they took him to the hospital. And he mentioned to me that he was told to take medication and he thinks that they were trying to test and see if he was God.

That’s when it became a concern for me. A day or two went by and then I got a call from his friend again. He told me that he has been coming to his house early in the morning and waking him up and telling him that he had solved the universe and that he thinks he is God and together they have to save people. 

It is very strange because he never mentions this to me or our parents, he acts normal around us . Or maybe we failed to see it . 

Any way I am very scared for him. I do not know what to do. Please any advice will help.",3.045571550497865,4.435994549473687,3.9742304409672826,89.4349103840683,74.03157894736842,6.482503556187768,24.83783783783784,6.885778809224403,0.8430233285917494,1821,57,383,16,37,586,204,475,0.053,0.845,0.102,0.9677,3,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,3,0,8,4,15,13,1,2,24,0,40,2,1,2,4,76,83,42,0,8,8,6,1,2,2,2,1,6,1,3,23,35,0,1,14,0,1,8,8,4,0,2,31,10,56,8,55,48,2,58,0,1,3,0,102,17,0,10,32,250,79,9,0.0,0.0,0.06321564993441316,0.0,0.0,0.1266039608728033,0.057423302114461325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321572674715559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15992453905001194,0.0576676737701406,0.18168084568308532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15795643371287904,0.0,0.055122759831213036,0.07298454712255424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307366208126928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055801982023560084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12533265673716085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768100667912008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629213180609585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03275456652419966,0.04627863598127717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05510158610638958,0.0,0.2130828169489783,0.10009728264228232,0.0,0.06768944696937669,0.0,0.1104474018628208,0.0,0.1036204996525846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17185344421075194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368188975728074,0.0,0.06497932843655256,0.0,0.0,0.07474708496446611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676131843331486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745809679081721,0.03560123310604467,0.0,0.07307433166494529,0.0,0.0,0.13248327975550853,0.0,0.06329618586972993,0.0,0.0,0.057328002638589386,0.05439863911338688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015984633556152,0.0,0.0,0.0652587401349195,0.13056541761947593,0.06872103260473436,0.06540903795575732,0.0,0.05170654449168245,0.0,0.0,0.0960666645804483,0.1998484158637828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3173517965767006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193019901672698,0.0,0.0,0.044910092654344286,0.0,0.0,0.07110866585344205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725680979320222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04149953940342455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061620336235825676,0.15454627041215213,0.0648557881183949,0.13112104482614426,0.10324207964027844,0.0589730127519288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251557895298011,0.09170282077501446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04870627810559283,0.0,0.16986095890738426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860735184145468,0.12452466262730134,0.0,0.051427851791098926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475991463567944,0.07197263858655596,0.08796233828103311,0.07046171979822848,0.06328036136741351,0.0,0.07792201200695048,0.0,0.0,0.2672502148346306,0.0,0.05141911656595511,0.05196237390441948,0.0,0.0,0.06005143785220185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04716039858226615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vKarnival,2020/03/23,"Someone please help me feel better Having a rouch night tonight, caught my gf breaking the same promise she made me when we first met and this is the 2nd time now. I feel like pure shit because I love her to pieces but she would just lie to me as if I meant nothing. All I feel inside is anxiety, sadness and anger. Please help",3.510454545454543,4.853518833333332,3.3246666666666687,94.737,72.78787878787878,5.8860606060606075,25.32121212121212,5.6839178017228535,0.4227975757575759,257,8,56,1,5,77,52,66,0.165,0.611,0.22399999999999998,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,2,3,7,2,0,3,0,4,2,1,1,2,15,12,6,0,2,3,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,4,3,12,4,3,7,3,8,0,1,0,1,9,0,1,1,7,34,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903844045675646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266740134060665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069876048751004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3550099564698828,0.1671968042792897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990726155247024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31374149553968594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433915213888632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112284454866865,0.22145242806603951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196288223825019,0.0,0.2245657868958011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.513806919117898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24023665860652066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982996501533608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13646944830410385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662538905798463,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trottolino,2020/03/23,"Is it self harm or what? Hi guys, I'm italian (22F) because of Covid19 I had to stay at my parents home.. And this makes me sick, but I have no other option.
Fortunately Im smart working, so I can stay focused on something for the most part of the day.
But in the evening and in the weekend I freak out.
In the last few weeks I start to pick my hair and cut it with my hand, yesterday I realized that I have now a ""hole"" in my forehead.. Something like alopecia, but I know for a fact that is my fault because I pick my hair with my hands.
It S not the first time I do something like this, but not so severely.
I pick my eyebrows too infafr I have anesthetic little holes..
I try to stop my self but I really can't, why am I like this? What should I do?",0.4082499999999989,2.260935325000002,2.3225000000000016,96.2225,83.25,5.5,22.5,6.6274283507984215,0.3439374999999996,572,20,137,6,16,190,93,160,0.11800000000000001,0.7290000000000001,0.153,0.8429,1,0,3,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,5,8,1,0,8,0,12,6,5,4,1,25,16,11,0,1,8,1,4,3,0,1,1,0,1,3,11,6,0,1,2,1,0,0,4,4,0,1,1,4,26,4,16,14,3,20,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,3,13,94,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119353762358516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210864977496322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11481582066722405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786324441683926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17212314475428087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436983218785956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877707187315268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553470606338,0.14169803859692065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547797639755493,0.17422749233238216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11603564907358202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19302225851768828,0.1882454510941574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136261170680264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3626938733676145,0.1963831165226608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4014780785151482,0.0,0.0,0.1230407104415204,0.3705681621680707,0.0,0.14533313831854078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013640943875426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180219812512518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13943927454780486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685828775082095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655333603103952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zman1548,2020/03/23,"Student Survey on Schizophrenia Related Symptoms (30s - 1 minute) Hi Everyone,

I am conducting a survey to help gain a better understanding of antipsychotic medication use to treat schizophrenia. I hope to gain deeper insight into patient experiences and what is important in shaping their journey to recovery.

It is only five quick questions and is not meant to take up much of your time.

Here is a link to the survey: [https://forms.gle/rxyAgwvdtV72Txsm7](https://forms.gle/rxyAgwvdtV72Txsm7)

Answers are completely anonymous and you do not need to provide any information.

I'm hoping to use the data to inform Johnson and Johnson about the importance of providing other services to aid individuals in their journey to recovery, as just drugging people is not the answer.

I would really appreciate it if you have been diagnosed with schizophrenia took the time to fill it out!

Cheers,

Zman1548",9.536446862996158,12.507293246478875,8.474122919334189,57.29987836107557,60.19718309859154,10.515749039692704,38.96542893725992,10.637119530657019,5.133400000000001,739,37,92,19,11,229,96,142,0.0,0.7959999999999999,0.204,0.9826,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,3,2,3,4,5,0,0,8,0,11,4,0,2,0,27,21,6,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,9,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,3,0,8,5,24,17,1,14,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,4,3,69,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703618744037022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822244140504287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21128322073279365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20453210582077785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336918495378576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925549215683205,0.0,0.19711901029492374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13507034718067454,0.0,0.0,0.4002970326293692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20300379501663027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813571406529635,0.14941981291779008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15326020605750465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970418712545726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22574139872884566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909479976046062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20944983327759034,0.1515131808571338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350084515315099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22388907202658556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20978280912807684,0.0,0.34808617394022423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14314951028157644,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,porcelainkat,2020/03/23,"Quarantine is making my job cut my hours. (Rant) I've just started this job maybe a couple months ago and with the virus going around we're gonna have less hours. My hours have just stabilized and I wasn't even getting paid much to begin with then this morning I go to finish a lab report that's already late and drop my computer. Now my charger is bent and the computer itself is acting strange on top of that I need to renew my virus protection which is additional money I can't spend. It all comes down to money now and how I don't have enough to afford everything I've done to myself. Maybe if I wasn't just laying down trying to avoid my work maybe it wouldn't have slipped off my bed. I don't know what to do, it seems like all my options for more money won't work. I don't know if I'm looking for advice or just someone to acknowledge what I'm going through or just to even have this stupid shit off of my chest.",4.451096718480137,4.6298888549222825,5.111515544041453,87.06171200345426,69.77720207253886,8.091364421416236,25.92789291882556,7.793537801064563,1.1991074265975814,731,19,159,8,12,236,106,193,0.08800000000000001,0.888,0.024,-0.8885,4,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,11,5,3,1,4,0,19,2,2,2,2,31,36,11,0,4,9,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,12,10,0,2,4,0,5,5,8,4,0,0,4,1,19,1,23,29,6,26,0,0,1,0,0,8,1,6,13,103,31,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14315505681967086,0.12986064606979808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16166295128242622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304132834124643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619409143539725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16209601263509854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499171721006935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513704393667336,0.0,0.193519616778214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316619506511699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653857399239405,0.0,0.2497726608276065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4328097553041965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907510995073095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610217093686833,0.0,0.16525486295116235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157097631213312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302048402756635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778780576944084,0.0,0.4415274230604968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693241291387947,0.0,0.10769206383085896,0.10862558115624164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333652586084783,0.0,0.0,0.15037694333737933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241263320423351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369124653027617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946176602850217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133029485693735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blobseyy,2020/03/23,"My life is falling apart. So recently, life has just been rough. Ive been struggling mentally for two years now, whether that was my (diagnosed)anxiety or just constantly being sad. I worked up the guts about eight months ago to ask for a therapist and I was met with a ""we dont have the time for it."" Now, Im failing all of my classes and I'm constantly debating suicide. Im too tired to do the work. All i do anymore is sometimes art(but im slowly losing my passion for that) and sleep. And Im scared because once my report card comes in, my parents are going to kill me. Sometimes I wonder if just ending it would make everything easier for me. They alreaddy idolize my brother because hes a fourth grader at a eleventh grade math score. They think Im just lazy and dont want to do my work, but Im immobilized by this constant feeling in my chest that says I should just stay in bed and hide. I hate being a teenager. I hate not being neurotypical. I just want to be genuinely happy again.",2.3154853213435587,4.4800259597989935,3.7339328220047636,86.94692409415501,78.3467336683417,6.8025390108436925,26.554086220576572,7.85451343220497,1.629617085427136,782,32,158,13,19,257,121,199,0.18600000000000005,0.762,0.053,-0.9688,1,0,0,0,0,2,25.0,1,0,2,5,12,10,3,2,8,0,22,7,3,1,2,30,35,11,2,5,11,2,2,0,0,2,3,1,1,0,6,9,0,0,3,0,0,3,3,8,0,2,5,3,24,2,19,24,2,22,0,3,0,1,9,6,0,3,12,103,30,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726522205848836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07530987022772774,0.0,0.09763061715929494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203243723082973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002186182227526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480132930849701,0.0,0.31915100619424297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307527394176773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719271964050955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847568303373947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04977656135946905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594835020186514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479613605019727,0.0,0.19438737628787847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6380225422900097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891439403035724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13906870285801995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013435649288868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571255298157053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920902962887472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857756208358907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484031490825584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093111081873008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720219274972812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078287118697012,0.09856024546705214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851572256828002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19472850672235006,0.0,0.0,0.10492887394593196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102915698798113,0.0,0.10768244376783133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143017996077334,0.0,0.06307934198483492,0.0,0.0,0.05740385369539683,0.11314761698819187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616609605037044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613038327630965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675899865387893,0.215006582856118,0.0,0.0,0.06993223853202181,0.0,0.0,0.06339511217728706
mentalhealth,igorrto2,2020/03/23,"I have no motivation to stay productive Sorry for my bad English. I am a writer and I am currently working on a visual novel, but recently, after publishing a chapter, I’ve received mixed reviews from my friends. This caused me to believe that I can’t write properly and that I am a bad writer myself. I couldn’t write a single scene in the past 1.5 week and my creativity and motivation is lost. It got worse today — I can’t even get out of my bed to stay productive. Help, what should I do? I need to release the game by summer but I just can’t bring myself to work on it! Maybe I shouldn’t be a writer...",3.4632437275985666,4.52793675806452,5.389784946236559,80.9602329749104,72.54838709677419,8.414336917562725,27.487455197132626,8.841846274778883,2.079612186379929,474,17,96,9,9,164,76,124,0.136,0.72,0.14400000000000002,0.2481,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,5,2,4,0,0,8,0,13,0,0,3,0,17,18,6,0,4,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,6,5,0,0,2,2,0,2,6,3,0,0,2,0,18,1,14,12,1,15,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,7,69,24,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3509351244442165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23676855707985306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158832797811447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388029554215945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16236237747033636,0.0,0.10979538354578518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16807719684441366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085999040208302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22940497501475585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111252328171449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15582453034882202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006132003934076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074990615227395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23524718137493844,0.0,0.44798666068116266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19919886544335286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16857070129015328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30598530685910824,0.0,0.21416213422260355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hup101,2020/03/23,"Depressed or not Nearly every day five out of six i either feel sad or empty. I cry most days easily from nothing at all, once i baked cookies and used the wrong flour so i cried because i ""couldn't do simple tasks"". I worry alot and constantly overthink everything i do or say however i don't think i suffer from depression as i have nothing to be sad about, i went to psychologist and on my first visit she said i seem quite depressed but i don't know if that was a diagonis or anything i feel like i'm secretly faking how i feel even though i also feel like i can't control it. My boyfriend thinks something wrong mentally and i keep telling him this is just who i am. I can't be depressed but please would someone tell me what they think and how they feel while struggling with their mental health",4.581908526256356,5.514504751552799,5.143026538678711,84.258594014681,69.80745341614906,8.090570299265952,28.92207792207793,8.296473431620573,1.9069826086956527,639,23,128,9,11,205,108,161,0.223,0.6970000000000001,0.08,-0.9662,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,3,3,8,13,0,1,3,0,14,2,0,4,1,38,29,19,0,3,10,0,5,2,0,1,1,2,1,0,5,7,1,2,11,0,0,2,6,11,0,3,3,7,28,2,12,22,4,11,0,7,0,0,12,4,0,8,7,89,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967046935509083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995120157198989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371553112518106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306783368382322,0.1356290931421562,0.0,0.0,0.2656636562558743,0.1559748789214235,0.0,0.4166144728387524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987066012650147,0.0,0.10188559705655276,0.0,0.10868073311765324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30571977492165736,0.17277950133059286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285982255222874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285389690748103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748482402590384,0.0,0.0,0.06645791489300973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815693352678892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437304737810369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23206403282060106,0.0,0.0,0.12878252977340476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13274072977660836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861997208518736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150285735620724,0.09616542265534624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008673353470512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246043521949263,0.0930949497231848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12641839216351927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113897781215766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324540109696604,0.11880944521932008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044414701732227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209986277994644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280649597004464,0.0,0.08590255188332846,0.2644277834396904,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Verschallertan,2020/03/23,"Hey, I`m kinda lost or stuck in my process. Searching for techniques to strenghten myself again. Dear Redditors, 

I´m 23 years old (male) and had a few psychotic episodes till I got the diagnosis of bipolar disorder in January   
Now after a heavy manic episode I\`m kinda lost in the way that I don\`t really know how to get back on track. There\`s no psychological support in any form...I have an appointment with a psychotherapist at the 15th of April and I\`m feeling so damn helpless until then.  
My main problems are that  I\`m constantly kinda bored and restless, feeling lonely a lot (just moved back to my brother in a small village where I don\`t know anyone. )  
I can\`t seem to find any real connection to myself and put a lot of pressure to be creative (I make music and draw in my freetime).   
As I write this down, I feel a lot of shame and sadness I tried to surpress since january but I can\`t let it out...   
I made a 10 month therapy in 2018 when leaving there I had a ""feeling of flow"" If you could name it like that. Where I just had a really healthy feeling for myself, my strenghts and weaknesses  etc. talked to people about my feelings, but now I\`m just hanging in without a direction what to do with myself.  


Anyways. I wondered if you knew some techniques, like questions for self-reflection to slowly find myself again. Anything that may had helped you when you had a similar feeling.   


Thanks for reading.",4.676702385067403,6.853311452471488,4.775694780504669,82.1155850328379,71.3574144486692,7.519460767369512,31.726408572416176,8.296473431620573,2.550720152091255,1124,52,198,18,22,350,157,263,0.10400000000000001,0.792,0.10400000000000001,0.6379,0,2,0,0,0,0,54.0,0,4,0,2,18,17,1,3,16,0,12,2,0,3,0,50,33,20,0,4,9,1,7,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,8,10,0,0,15,1,0,4,2,12,0,0,11,7,28,5,39,18,7,37,0,5,0,0,12,15,1,14,19,141,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16910577178600525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693876839927454,0.0,0.10231810599971017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912137400419933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13436327084475275,0.0,0.09927234567769612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425000676710931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866773999598536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44007686262294543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272820852474201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496053749364168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09944302478696393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833399400991462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666385775326936,0.0,0.0,0.1316540927596197,0.0,0.1271421978928539,0.0,0.12148878265338164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714553198761706,0.3171185961459279,0.0,0.11764992742249293,0.08299538509481467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924397590774167,0.13214971320312496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13046993590239142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619907203659985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189729601857259,0.0,0.1249922320882113,0.13928500992741372,0.0,0.12436985629506225,0.14152182667426882,0.15930591878551698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319101506968494,0.12970978286417173,0.0,0.0,0.10285219706468374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410952566938743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09993673514372156,0.0,0.1144720762897577,0.14218929117230375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441612437044352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869229544994808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11985566867364428,0.13483731499673227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006844217053223
mentalhealth,appleJuice36,2020/03/23,"Good text services With all the lockdowns, does anyone know any good online or text help survives for a little help? Phoneing isnt always easy with everyone at home. Ive seen a few that you have to pay quite alot for but financialy, this isnt really an option as im a student",4.07357142857143,5.1852335000000025,5.041428571428573,83.85357142857143,71.14285714285714,7.742857142857144,26.5,8.07648339933343,1.6127642857142854,220,7,43,3,4,72,46,56,0.054000000000000006,0.804,0.142,0.5715,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,6,0,4,0,0,0,1,8,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,2,2,7,5,3,2,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,3,0,24,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311787632089227,0.0,0.0,0.1889355181861192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942668317526853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431329526389118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654807067047799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4660651695345359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724503215220336,0.0,0.2786884896554426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001066030070399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15268938788560546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27846099342606023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295508892193917,0.0,0.0,0.1779865110337313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LEO23498,2020/03/23,I admit that I’m pretty sure I have depression to my mother and it didn’t go the way I expected So I went to tell my mom that I might have depression this is after my mom told me my grandma might be dying soon for context and the flood gates opened and I was crying and walling telling her that I was struggling to feel happy and that I was hurting myself and that I was considering suicide and that all my friend group just fell apart and she she... said nothing until maybe a week or two later she gave me these fucking vitamin supplements to help me relax and said this will fix it you’re 14 just cheer up and I want to dig myself out of this hole I dug myself into but I just don’t know what the fuck I’m supposed to do if my mom won’t listen to me on this so I guess here I am joining this subreddit,2.6014311270125248,3.704722720930235,4.045581395348837,89.62321109123438,74.69767441860466,6.920214669051878,23.695885509839,7.321109707123232,0.8013706618962426,636,18,141,7,13,211,102,172,0.106,0.7859999999999999,0.10800000000000001,-0.5504,0,0,0,0,0,2,3.0,0,0,0,0,7,11,2,1,4,0,16,3,0,0,2,29,32,16,2,3,6,4,1,0,1,4,1,3,1,0,15,13,0,0,3,1,0,3,3,6,0,1,10,4,31,5,15,17,1,16,0,3,0,2,19,7,2,5,5,103,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15838003868620232,0.0,0.0,0.2483720101400749,0.0,0.14964087552766445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290407797834937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113966825630604,0.26659272240031395,0.0,0.0,0.08194344435367168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883561846367944,0.0,0.0,0.1534872129727763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664391394812746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543526217097833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924009840187901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448528341824791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30591420076139514,0.0,0.5066018657773244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834903506862434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14668759755531513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27430519006683823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15073307447234194,0.0,0.15771457615675152,0.0,0.13589230143091702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520474325213441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777458678954035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14084742645638682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504382672087804,0.1144470430079619,0.11565620800596164,0.0,0.0,0.13366059064327365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lahekas1324,2020/03/23,Just need to rant Just got an e-mail from my school that I might not graduate this year. Which is bad news because half of my family tree still thinks I'm the smart kid from before my mental health got bad. I'm scared to tell my parent because they don't realize I'm depresed and are just gonna say that I'm lazy. Basically I'm about to lose my 10 month streak of being self harm free and the only thing holding me back are fandoms.,5.381304347826087,4.576721478260873,5.951217391304351,85.16769565217396,67.91304347826087,9.53391304347826,27.09565217391304,8.841846274778883,1.6085452173913044,344,8,78,5,5,112,66,92,0.20800000000000002,0.733,0.059000000000000004,-0.9325,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,1,6,7,0,1,3,0,6,1,0,0,0,12,16,2,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,2,5,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,5,0,1,2,1,8,3,8,11,0,4,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,39,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604249897375554,0.34839770644488643,0.2543600392384917,0.0,0.1775303104030272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19667950997104533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337238469874939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22176586615120664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23340563805383355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21025180151412926,0.22132538876667068,0.0,0.0,0.16652792642429484,0.0,0.0,0.15469784926020072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15867389867042414,0.0,0.0,0.2316609436445564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16591239530284216,0.20887684563231773,0.21114653783330325,0.0,0.0,0.21764848676957416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16661363911572505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18235340448918255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13860570922432805,0.1336828445984249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343520503358047
mentalhealth,danaraman,2020/03/23,"I'm okay but i'm not okay. This isolation has me spiraling again and I'm so damn scared of relapsing into depression and self hate Cptsd in recovery. Adhd and dissociation too. I've been doing really good recently, well up until all my friends had to move off campus yesterday. I don't tolerate being alone very well and this social isolation from the virus has me spiraling a little tonight. Bad thoughts that i had calmed down over this year are starting to come back. I can't focus on anything for more than a minute and I keep vaping even though I really want to quit. I'm moving into a new apartment but money issues have me scared shitless about it; we can't pay my security deposit because of my mom losing her job. I also think I have corona with the sore throat i got but i have no way of knowing until i possibly reach the point where I have to go to the hospital. I'm really scared for these next months where I'll be alone at home for long parts of my days alone with the thoughts again. 

Idk just a lot going on right now and I'm really scared and I know it's up to me to calm down but frankly my body's not in a state to do that right now. My heart is beating really fast from the adderall and the deep breathing isn't slowing me down enough to be able to sleep. I want someone to be with me but I have no one around anymore to help me.",2.974349951124143,4.4161150322580704,4.285658194851745,86.9242448680352,74.30465949820787,7.9401107852720765,24.151352231997393,8.575989854853784,1.447837275985663,1070,32,228,20,22,353,155,279,0.179,0.6729999999999999,0.14800000000000002,-0.958,1,5,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,3,17,18,2,4,12,2,22,6,5,0,1,34,42,18,0,2,8,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,8,16,0,2,5,0,3,5,8,9,2,1,6,0,29,9,43,32,5,49,0,2,0,0,7,23,1,1,19,152,37,3,0.102763709089207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350200831001905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3192966321099471,0.0,0.08218010103113338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191398598413226,0.0,0.0,0.08456577654494013,0.09148148826091956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901894906439766,0.0858034046464916,0.06264380324251734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414731437821565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852183605969495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662740909329989,0.0,0.08851023205739597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618238196013847,0.0,0.06787446066579833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939498672591916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680596813200328,0.08619332359287261,0.08218952580212102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145788748918606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177549005867838,0.06888034803647614,0.0,0.1030803790571632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725861343932001,0.1019771245705989,0.09134110634570544,0.0,0.0,0.11295249402451996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299623350243363,0.0,0.09094264875861137,0.0,0.11496630453205198,0.0,0.08736603060263064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203556140789846,0.08202501217203216,0.21844311929005106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992498305995592,0.109290370445233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06963534882454163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128308269326563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714492125550343,0.11585064146706107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930185405135356,0.0,0.0,0.3291653172885298,0.0,0.10146676521935301,0.0,0.0,0.17551929214163148,0.0,0.0,0.4115376002891725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072049605122218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283792381091672,0.1047546600774042,0.0870713572304445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273668221524868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584683536765608,0.10096482242029632,0.16316581239827102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479082228484654,0.12122539627341633,0.08156904901808057,0.0,0.0,0.1847938317930396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06617645941290068
mentalhealth,Ihgene,2020/03/23,"Who do I get help? (Not sure how relevant that is but I live in Germany)

My life at the moment is... a bit difficult at best. Since may last year my depression got really bad, and I started to have regular panic and anxiety attacks.

 When it it got worse I asked my Boyfried at that time for help, but he never mentioned it again or did anything to support me. It was not the first time I asked him or other people for help, but almost all of them never did anything.

I feel like I can't deal with this alone and I really want to get into therapy or something like that. But when ever I try to search for options on my self, I get anxiety and have to stop. But due to the experience I had before, I'm to afraid to ask my friends to help me with that. 

I'm really overwhelmed with the situation.",2.133391761612621,3.806598417177917,4.080775635407537,86.54265337423315,77.09815950920245,7.601928133216478,24.52629272567923,8.418075326091056,1.5391703768624012,614,21,131,12,14,209,94,163,0.179,0.632,0.18899999999999997,0.0167,0,1,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,5,13,1,3,5,0,11,1,0,1,5,30,25,15,0,1,10,0,1,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,11,8,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,6,1,20,6,22,18,3,21,0,2,0,0,15,6,0,6,17,93,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859887525061212,0.13300935050320126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19648922412566727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113653176742842,0.0,0.36017952489888755,0.1461017374800165,0.0,0.0,0.10722933449918154,0.0,0.0,0.10928003649737653,0.0,0.13477389286460162,0.0,0.14020660784776193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324003183345749,0.11061208257393744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616757409889528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562408641663586,0.0,0.0,0.0649354320462281,0.09174669491455828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923805990860304,0.0,0.0,0.09922067340179573,0.0,0.2012899551279035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20542607116523331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34432171592507305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468334365466676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071022643548038,0.1254837298271863,0.0,0.11340144152890055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198098228811564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150678819212563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903357849634183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24681662499394216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13397506332176315,0.0,0.0,0.1062343125572347,0.14435484361188453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886767683160172,0.0,0.0,0.090899726645503,0.0,0.0,0.10736887407657912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14573492864263876,0.12103884377762004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468649385407917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497710544491023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719200169929467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574826791753365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13087583161693195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270135353711268
mentalhealth,arigillies,2020/03/23,I feel like I'm drowning I go days on end without social contact and all my schoolwork is piling up and i just got rejected and publicly embarrassed and shamed i just have this constant feeling that I'm drowning and it's getting worse and worse and I find myself crying a lot now and I don't know how to get out of this hole. I have no friends I can talk to and I don't know what is going on anymore.,2.1289036544850504,3.5327036511627914,3.6084053156146174,91.0743023255814,76.44186046511628,5.84451827242525,27.40199335548173,6.1826913282559595,0.9661481727574754,318,13,69,2,7,105,56,86,0.235,0.685,0.08,-0.93,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,2,1,0,7,0,0,1,1,21,18,10,2,0,3,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,10,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,1,2,11,2,8,17,2,10,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,1,5,48,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22466825043064687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244810833155784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488451513877264,0.1461004975422779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20064848857772652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22909233350105795,0.1618412611316929,0.0,0.0,0.20705478625588908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502536662096554,0.0,0.2367171207738877,0.0,0.25749745971235954,0.0,0.18118589698338414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490025188320875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067671214561613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19259744433526002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309304849259049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18208544075762828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183778790287192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4617301944286682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sxhs,2020/03/23,"I feel like I'm finally losing my mind. I (F19) don't have any mental illness diagnosed - I never went to a psychologist or talked to a doctor about my mental health. But I'm sure that I am not functioning healthy. I regularly get really scared and in those moments I feel like absolute shit - recently learned that those are panic attacks.   
In general, I'm just really scared about everything, I try not to show it, but everytime I encounter a new situation, I get scared as fuck. People describe me as outgoing, self confident and beautiful, am I lying to myself? Why do I feel the exact opposite? I have to admit, when I'm drunk, I did hook up with random strangers (I regret nearly every night) - but I think I just wanted to feel loved. I was raped at a young age and maybe that has something to do with my whole mess.  
I don't know what to do anymore, a month ago I started to have physical complaints, I could not feel my left handy, leg and mouth anymore. Breathing seems so hard, my head hurts. I've been in the hospital for 4 days, but they said my body is in nearly perfect condition. Is it possibe that my mental health is affecting my body? Idk I feel super weird.",5.063901018922851,5.80624476419214,6.131685589519652,78.29304512372636,68.60698689956331,9.774788937409026,30.550509461426486,9.888512548439397,2.921167452692868,917,35,176,21,15,306,135,229,0.23,0.634,0.136,-0.9666,0,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,1,3,6,19,4,4,7,0,19,16,7,1,4,39,41,13,0,3,10,0,7,2,0,0,5,1,0,1,9,6,1,0,11,2,0,1,6,13,0,0,5,8,32,6,24,35,1,23,0,3,0,3,6,9,2,4,15,109,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783538832738213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505465033221075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189126233133213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12556057990921402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451899785236168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812060184351968,0.0,0.0,0.07117882282666915,0.0,0.0,0.11202213058334727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11296726638269927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299057529810566,0.0,0.09919246869428316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3348350530942161,0.15769515704495055,0.0,0.12090375710311932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102034288107027,0.11532641081340625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886887368204317,0.0,0.1132703533853966,0.2346340018178903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815221159684912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060655872052094474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991615454813816,0.0,0.0,0.1078413587547355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347459023763532,0.0,0.0,0.09961225941777707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088041476166773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33367773703085163,0.0,0.11144114658830127,0.0,0.0880954189873528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512331515554449,0.10659499071763856,0.0,0.10357375485285003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129494147343407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651591240605378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414103126583884,0.0,0.1089759935243031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498611717729174,0.0,0.3314956288926282,0.0,0.0,0.10047571962894136,0.11513885415876812,0.0,0.11329211036721375,0.0,0.1240592903906516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496738677697531,0.0,0.0,0.07811968966323549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402140096614143,0.0,0.0,0.08871035722005463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071994745381809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493325189446183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509844859404858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231309460708007,0.09959078354009222,0.12322295771258535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the-family-friend,2020/03/23,"i don’t know how i’m going to keep going it’s currently past 4 in the morning and i can’t stop imagining how i’m going to end my life. i feel as though i’m suffocating and i can’t get myself to just sleep and stop panicking. i can’t stop imagining my family’s and my friend’s and my boyfriend’s reactions to it, which is probably why i won’t do it, but i’ve come up with a plan and i hate that i did. i just feel like there is nothing here for me and that i have no future. i feel lost and confused but i have no one to go to. i don’t want to worry anyone. i will probably force myself to tell my therapist all of this so maybe i can get some help. it just sucks feeling so alone with so many people to talk to. i don’t know how i’m going to keep going at this point.",0.04653409090909122,1.4541651306818224,2.913636363636368,93.76545454545456,82.35227272727272,6.672727272727273,18.954545454545453,7.645422480735847,0.289825,597,14,151,10,16,212,88,176,0.19699999999999998,0.7440000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.9696,1,1,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,2,12,6,2,1,2,0,15,2,1,3,1,36,40,18,0,1,5,0,4,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,9,11,0,5,8,0,0,7,9,4,0,1,2,4,24,2,19,36,2,18,0,1,0,0,4,4,1,2,8,96,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202697448912713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588559887841168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812672562845974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145788932511058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129275462269147,0.0,0.2773514167471442,0.09796683803653397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10594752922796724,0.0,0.14329119576286345,0.0,0.46761026985447207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538905847136046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919164167382462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437777228349163,0.0,0.0,0.1507278753423846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686010018930843,0.06699556996384765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14969533382114614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139029912494833,0.1377671177471057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158146274505586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292391697672908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090762307961273,0.095069780687872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963368102316253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957021036433384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723062863292432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3439444583792683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022118067282068,0.11985905733221675,0.0,0.0,0.15922034986011727,0.0,0.0,0.13473109468861147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088376700148002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373993398189953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392637900662975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BubbelsTheRoundOne,2020/03/23,"I don't think I can do this anymore I feel so empty, like I'm not inside my body.

I want to do something but my body isn't responding

I had a breakdown yesterday, my bf came running and for the rest of the day just took care of me. Making me pancakes, we went out for a walk, we played videogames and when we were off to bed he held me until I fell asleep. One of my friends also called and I broke down infront of her to, about the suicide attempt and how lonley I feel. She sang for me until I calmed down, it was nice

When he is home I'm alright. I can keep myself at float. But he's at work now and I'm all alone at home (I work 50% due to my mental state and due to corona I work from home)

I just can't see how I can make it though the day. All my body wants to do is to go back to sleep and I have this acce in my body and this buzzing in my head that won't leave me alone. 

I have never self harmed myself but today the thought is appealing

I thought I was over all this!",-0.013789864569680788,1.6048621513761532,1.828296199213632,100.44420489296637,83.44954128440367,4.702839667977282,18.17911751856705,5.288315135182226,-0.7415983398864129,751,17,192,3,21,247,115,218,0.075,0.794,0.131,0.8859999999999999,0,2,1,0,0,1,18.0,3,0,0,4,12,9,0,0,7,1,19,7,7,4,4,36,39,20,1,2,6,0,2,1,2,1,0,1,4,1,7,13,0,2,5,2,0,7,6,2,0,1,10,4,38,7,29,28,4,31,0,1,1,0,13,10,0,0,14,129,45,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25321662389553873,0.0,0.09775878748072267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123357810623435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399838344820256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5431437979648016,0.0,0.0,0.12482518094735574,0.13981500581915124,0.12463629379529664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767502569856054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362086433576196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444570567555663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947429895937117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545800261700682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36786324462647996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865642280144028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943914899657494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059722429852582574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16319814738962415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231935840652506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428240290922796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283595641121681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741294478377044,0.0,0.12752755010149225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12233266463108305,0.0,0.0,0.0941096969686008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337155119679041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832926346179801,0.12010448386131085,0.19409676768734024,0.0,0.0,0.11587337971818586,0.0,0.13581800546836667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442058065500514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332176608732998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669860963135385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Muskus03,2020/03/23,"Was I verbally abused as a child or am I overreacting? I don’t know if this is the place to post this, so please tell me if it’s not. Also, I apologise in advance for the length of the post.

To give some context- I’m a 17 year old female, not diagnosed with anything (my parents never took me to get diagnosed and I would never ask them to do that) but suffer from depression, suicidal thoughts and social anxiety.

I remember that from the moment I entered school at the age of 6 my father has been hard on me. He would go absolutely berserk when I didn’t get more than a 90/100 on tests, he couldn’t stand the fact that I didn’t do my homework sometimes or that I sometimes forgot to take a certain book (now, I have an excellent memory, but I was a “forgetful” child- things like homework and school books or the fact that I need to eat would often slip my mind, in a silly way) but my father’s reaction to those things was always very extreme. 

When I started learning maths at school I wasn’t very good at it (I was always way more skilled in the languages department, not the case now though) and my father did everything he could to help me and teach me. To him maths was always literally God. If I didn’t succeed in maths, I would never achieve anything in life. And when I didn’t get a good grade on a test, it always felt like doomsday to me. I clearly remember one instance where I got a 70/100 on a maths test and my father printed out as many maths exercises as he could, came home, sat me down at my desk, out the maths exercises in front of me and told me that if I didn’t do all of them, I will regret having been born. This is one my worst memories and I will probably never forget it.

Up until secondary school, I was extremely afraid of failure (still afraid of it now, but less) and extremely afraid of not being an A- student because of my father’s reaction. In the beginning of secondary school, I failed an exam for the first time in my life, and  had multiple panic and anxiety attacks when I thought of my father’s reaction to that. His reaction was completely calm and collected, which was very strange in my eyes because I was expecting the worst.

Where was my mother in all of this? She never behaved the way he did but she almost never stood up for me or tried to tell my father that he was perhaps overreacting. She was never a particularly dominant type.

Lastly, I’d like to add that I constantly feel like I’m walking on eggshells around him. If I put the cup I drank from in the wrong place, he goes berserk, and this applies for the littlest things. He constantly thinks I’m being disrespectful when I’m genuinely not saying or doing anything. Just this morning, he picked up the phone and told me “As always, you haven’t called your grandparents”, to which I replied “I am going to call them, but first I have to eat breakfast” (yesterday evening I told him I’ll call them in the morning) and he had the worst reaction he has had to anything in years. Yelled for a few seconds like I killed a man, told me he never wants to hear me speak like that again, told me how disrespectful I am and how I act like we’re enemies. 

All of this led me to develop existential depression and social anxiety at a very young age. It has also affected my self- worth, confidence, self- belief, and frankly, my will to live. 

Please, tell me, am I in the fault here? Am I overreacting? Is this normal behaviour for a parent?",6.488799330303756,5.9998867669616525,6.906928964362593,78.18094355417367,65.54867256637168,10.51557043769433,33.22107948656621,10.030559657594573,3.057661835286613,2700,101,540,54,37,882,270,678,0.141,0.762,0.098,-0.9899,3,0,0,0,1,0,80.0,0,2,4,8,23,30,2,4,40,0,57,11,1,5,15,96,92,51,2,17,22,10,3,7,0,7,6,4,3,5,30,25,4,1,10,4,1,12,22,16,0,5,40,8,86,14,79,40,11,89,1,5,1,0,60,35,0,13,43,378,116,29,0.0,0.06990320099433425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590781593514518,0.0,0.0,0.0943616534104888,0.2454560781052611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540034861639327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19420191497937936,0.05252089240850586,0.05515533819311896,0.06711895194687799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192949115073331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18073122782612167,0.06747820559504088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06185847379830865,0.12751215557595408,0.0,0.09421049894706864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016300994509346,0.1197638304163141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073974299561953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038967744334747915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05302376386440401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02983125470192768,0.04214831468446694,0.056647509122010435,0.0,0.0,0.10036765092925136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247234878001984,0.05659643439653765,0.06706005555391739,0.0989697557573882,0.04718623760741083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05285078474872542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649524161425302,0.0,0.03954523933810603,0.0,0.059179989315959226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527274966951142,0.0,0.03242385918019925,0.04809139462394913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334432477295058,0.20176472930298145,0.0,0.052096477673484486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059814898794639526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05957134769665307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04374640612854258,0.36402429511650747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057805694157481866,0.0,0.0,0.06190866990724269,0.0,0.07995739319437616,0.0,0.0,0.06922165745991643,0.13102100350148113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12328109103419327,0.1295245791771399,0.0,0.0,0.1130079039960944,0.0,0.0636100213450312,0.0,0.0,0.05930947067459015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13366688370840568,0.0,0.0,0.04691772420487507,0.0,0.29854656159941045,0.0,0.0,0.1230959465954784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12028243824636806,0.0,0.0,0.11670142579375685,0.0,0.04175921854138359,0.0,0.047116026228983386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453443788063318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044359292212808966,0.0,0.1547010407033211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758731636785785,0.03780365428600757,0.05796541656882506,0.09367593641758602,0.03440231574240348,0.0,0.0,0.2818764672664936,0.06554915363203086,0.040055894427727265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19471872349735653,0.034798657716932226,0.1404900377808858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676424696723531,0.06450525289112376,0.0,0.07598579277345645
mentalhealth,s5dness,2020/03/23,"Sociopathy I don't really understand the concept of sociopaths, but when I take one of those surveys online testing if I'm a sociopath, they always score highly likely (Even though they are most likely bs). Whenever somebody gets hurt on TV, a movie, or in real life, I have to try hard not to laugh. I also have to try not to manipulate people, but it seems so easy, and I don't understand why. I'm a 13 yr old christian boy, and I try to ask myself everyday, ""Am I really a good person?"" Is being a sociopath a sin? Should I worry about it at my age?  Do I talk to somebody about it, or do I not say anything at all?",5.22048368953881,4.513671700787405,6.909336332958382,77.84047244094491,68.21259842519686,9.776827896512936,30.74128233970753,9.23628265651192,2.513840044994375,474,16,97,8,7,166,82,127,0.153,0.774,0.073,-0.8859,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,2,0,7,6,0,0,7,0,11,1,0,1,1,18,19,11,0,2,8,0,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,2,4,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,2,0,1,0,2,14,4,14,17,2,9,2,1,0,0,7,5,0,5,6,68,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14974076367839412,0.15580388539864162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15408771469018387,0.0,0.17504997344736434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367438646133283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782844072064437,0.0,0.0,0.15705327611955713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16773586691724698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19783595053244526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20045099030987504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322575685005377,0.18295812551109047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19648344799337095,0.0,0.1268829093803126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981297775949674,0.1634962087570625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21312723332740505,0.2399094932655407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489057386887489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17046195944634987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14078588180907642,0.15050144821814687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839684963169011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38138375100339017,0.0,0.0,0.3898599132352764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16896062220540156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19015766263238826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_pleasegivemeadvice,2020/03/23,"how do I get the help I need?? hi so I'm a 15 year old female in calgary, Alberta (canada) who is struggling with mental health issues. I know I need help, but I'm not sure where to go to get it. I also really dont want to involve my parents in this. any advice would be very much appreciated. let me know if you have any questions. I'm also super new to reddit, as in I just got it to do this, so please be nice. I'm really sorry if I have messed anything up",0.5028932893289344,1.9384269900990103,3.624290429042905,89.06622662266226,81.07920792079206,6.073047304730473,19.143014301430146,6.937597516519254,0.17254367436743667,350,8,81,4,9,127,67,101,0.1,0.6970000000000001,0.20199999999999999,0.9358,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,7,5,0,1,2,0,10,1,0,1,1,15,23,9,0,6,5,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,10,3,11,18,1,9,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,3,3,50,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17262568062259626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.282542630861055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402635545704649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537239968081578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070388950254025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184590383642032,0.0,0.1003973745535611,0.0,0.1412875170386827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18777650368875806,0.0,0.0,0.2368168754316592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438241401147398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19417045260089846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18064218671551335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17802716381820013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986209659273182,0.2619755850293461,0.0,0.17061495360957188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18537019897911905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19615499352435636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19391465727439366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19789455575704007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263400350400677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19775133552221905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846786531219499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16649568972010007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575926349954696,0.10419597311424912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549097730203154,0.0,0.0,0.11376033071866935
mentalhealth,kitkatthegreat,2020/03/23,How to cope with social distancing and staying at home ? Does any one have any tips for social distancing and staying at home? As someone with bipolar and someone in recovery I am finding it very difficult especially since I’ve been very manic lately.,7.4220000000000015,8.8820352,7.56666666666667,67.53000000000003,63.66666666666666,10.444444444444443,39.444444444444436,10.504223727775694,4.773444444444444,204,11,30,5,3,66,33,45,0.07,0.93,0.0,-0.4859,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,7,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,8,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,18,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765463478393494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17793777140795014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18584235753947026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4079184514324908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22936808466198866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13778346527866406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16819886846609242,0.0,0.0,0.4145440588204961,0.3445661873815155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43345109921000463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355414603485452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MoistyAnt,2020/03/23,Need someone to talk too? You can message me and I will listen or just be a friend! Just as the title says!,-0.8044927536231903,1.302932608695656,1.2521739130434817,99.74028985507248,92.47826086956522,3.066666666666667,16.36231884057971,3.1291,-1.166611594202898,82,2,19,0,3,27,22,23,0.0,0.841,0.159,0.5837,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,5,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43578953206924187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182415915782528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4485612735139257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.477924206412164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4533681634630176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,this-could-be-bad,2020/03/23,"Everyone has someone except for me? It’s like my brain can’t comprehend having friends or people that love me, and I can’t seem to keep attentive during conversations and I am seemingly very alone lol. Everyone has someone they’re close to that they’d call a best friend or a lover, I just dont, even my cat ran away 💀💀💀💀 I just want to Blame my trauma but to know it’s not JUST that.  What can I do? Help? Lol",0.11359550561797604,2.214017044943823,2.3326853932584264,94.19026404494385,86.41573033707864,6.256629213483146,19.0123595505618,7.554174236665415,0.4367878651685389,323,9,76,6,10,109,59,89,0.059000000000000004,0.665,0.276,0.9534,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,4,7,0,0,2,2,10,3,1,0,0,17,17,5,0,1,8,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,0,11,6,7,15,1,3,0,0,0,2,8,2,0,4,1,46,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21371245886842066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19386907137413595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21654763312801747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303506304692673,0.21070256714235366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418362395176017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362897358553482,0.0,0.0,0.3943453225064652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31884516393857465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830952537124475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834100062744866,0.0,0.0,0.11340248912328915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081034283639753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18623552482221145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14305449135961162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3756997077740382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34967297452084645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17025724637518325,0.12170835005536247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fckingupsince91,2020/03/23,"Depression vs my inner kid 
I’ve been reflecting on my depression/anxiety struggle from over the past 5 years. I think even since high school I’ve had an issue with motivation and not wanting to do things for myself. For a long time, with out knowing,  my life mainly revolved around the lives of the people I knew. I never focused on myself or what I wanted to do. Like I was never good enough maybe? Any time I felt lonely or empty or just bored (which was often) I called a friend or family member just hoping to hang out. -possibly just trying to distract myself from dealing with my own empty life. 

I’m more aware now and no longer rely on the distraction from others but I still have absolutely no motivation to do anything for myself or better myself 😕. I seriously don’t have any interest. I don’t have any exciting goals for myself no matter how hard I try to think or plan. 

Maybe it’s the numbness of depression, recovering from toxic parent codependency , or fuck I don’t know. Has any one else struggled with this? Any helpful or mindful encouragement?",3.9537843784378417,6.246436633663367,5.201518151815184,77.75830583058308,73.75247524752477,7.855225522552256,25.083608360836077,8.680891452615391,2.047989218921893,848,28,147,17,18,281,121,202,0.195,0.665,0.14,-0.7569,1,2,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,5,9,19,1,4,8,0,14,4,0,3,2,41,25,12,0,3,14,1,2,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,6,9,0,0,9,0,0,1,9,11,0,1,6,2,22,8,27,19,4,19,0,3,0,1,7,9,1,10,10,107,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4364560138145366,0.0,0.09819729979147587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563176457914948,0.11427023349324256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352659148049875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107291629509504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13233655748644932,0.2211176288451444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723076742091477,0.0,0.0,0.1326332333471345,0.0,0.08478251300839428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100915833223165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12324855495285506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917289108248356,0.1186694720779608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766474616617874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498798357355948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603897469152108,0.13562249653681707,0.0,0.12749336541431874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13397756239945696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410898326119584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813330850905212,0.06271164992189078,0.0,0.11334683008852416,0.11359716490948138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579156581119177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296099799267927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19800282941041386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698205200672345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425318570958677,0.0,0.1225369533404298,0.08899070203994057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470993096467066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129910150944215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618315263591507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025108118229105,0.0,0.0,0.26838563650602804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527863535834103,0.16449958117849114,0.0,0.0,0.1496989282671077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17430002420506402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142357870222625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266152652982907
mentalhealth,contemporaries,2020/03/23,"Hate my Brain I (22f) have been in therapy for a few months now and one thing that I really struggle with is being painfully self aware of my mental state/intrusive thoughts at all times. When I went to therapy I went in pretty much knowing a lot of my flaws with my thinking, and my own shortcomings of certain situations. Recently I was talking to my therapist and she said that my intrusive thoughts probably won’t ever stop, but instead I have to change my reaction to them.

For some reason, this really sent me and has caused me to hate my head even more. I can’t help but think why does my brain not only punishes me with the terrible thoughts, but the self awareness that they’re irrational too. I guess the grass is always greener, but I always find myself wishing I just had sad/unpleasant/toxic thoughts and my brain would just let them be. Instead I’ve always been painfully aware of their abnormality, that they’re feelings not facts, they’re irrational, etc., but still struggle to grapple with my feelings towards the thoughts.

It’s like I’m suffering not only from the intrusive thought, but from my awareness it’s intrusive, my current inability to be able to control my feelings/reactions towards the thought, and then the fact this sends my brain into a never ending spiral of thinking. I just want my brain to stop thinking. I just want to feel sad and be said and that be it. I want to simply feel happy and not question it. I’m trying so hard to be kind to my brain and my head about the situation, but... it’s just all too much right now. My head won’t stop.

Idk really what I was getting at posting here. I just think I had to get it off my chest until my next session. Thanks for reading this far if you did, and I hope if you feel even a fraction of how I do that you don’t feel so alone. 😞",4.380930833872013,5.695545456582633,5.035588235294117,83.4159162895928,70.62464985994399,8.293428140486965,30.25737987502693,8.730908602173464,2.3363028226675286,1436,59,282,25,26,462,166,357,0.14800000000000002,0.752,0.10099999999999999,-0.9575,1,1,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,3,3,1,22,16,3,2,12,0,25,12,10,4,7,79,62,26,0,8,19,0,7,1,0,3,2,2,0,2,17,16,0,4,22,1,0,4,9,10,0,1,19,9,51,6,39,33,10,32,0,2,0,0,16,10,0,7,18,202,68,2,0.07016721033106849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267206857955362,0.0,0.0,0.1751542199204192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4699788745151053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07208105345764819,0.07422760469020365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869849282529058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06140379860920425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06214732162190775,0.0,0.0782549873835352,0.09268956132189868,0.06347025889305513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21287189899297448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06413155905640115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07331894270635361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729709290091241,0.0,0.0,0.07469430015139683,0.06285603821195804,0.13855118687901258,0.2160354031210406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047031602023600315,0.0,0.0,0.06969187213485704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306835193856996,0.038562063766875314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175072653746482,0.0,0.034280154685064734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596536530202878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071204450971776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05600679785202415,0.0,0.10316194627206368,0.0,0.05411727827862598,0.0,0.0746236242167369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04754711766200848,0.1067306506247412,0.14932571789684634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720079148874986,0.07138527847415786,0.07565212042425107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860333409126666,0.0,0.07018619857469341,0.0,0.13485273501656592,0.07214357855271651,0.06928165516660241,0.0,0.0,0.059922414235608776,0.1334901703086658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463994065505174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774176860597672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603562480907191,0.1759887891494099,0.0,0.1467080063454788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05639774577742485,0.0,0.06460054001083032,0.160484640293187,0.08146953933163431,0.046615976697412666,0.2248015757618669,0.0,0.389934490745922,0.04091506461380422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04763892991814282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415931586899046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009141390419862,0.06331499351237999,0.0,0.08068882902330593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04984477302357639,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway2074322,2020/03/23,Out to get me How do I deal with fear and assumption that people are out to poison me due to retaliation and bullying?,3.017500000000002,4.763005750000001,5.8066666666666675,74.80500000000002,74.83333333333334,9.8,24.5,10.125756701596842,2.58265,94,3,19,3,2,34,19,24,0.34600000000000003,0.654,0.0,-0.8909999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,6,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,6,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5871831852424276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6409044345875684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975674542580074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3948556987824221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,huan2526,2020/03/23,"I don’t feel like my psychologist is on my side. I left my family over 2 years ago because of my mother’s narcissistic abuse and the mental damage it was causing me. I just started seeing this psychologist who just so happens to be my moms psychologist for the past few years. I originally started seeing her because of extreme anxiety and panic attacks that kept me home from school every day. I have since managed to get that somewhat under control so I started bringing up my family. I struggle daily with the emotional damage my family has caused me so I thought I would be a good idea to start working on it. I ask my psychologist if she knew about my relationship I had with my mom and she responded with the bs that I knew my mom had spun. I tried explaining how I was treated and how she acted but the psychologist didn’t seem to understand what I was saying. It’s really hard because I already struggle with thinking that what my mom said is right and that I actually am the bad guy that my mom has made me out to be. 

Am I just over reacting or should I try to find a new psychologist?",5.9139423076923086,6.182877865740743,7.169629629629629,73.25371794871796,66.6388888888889,10.349857549857553,33.74501424501425,10.214889679676881,3.4336941595441592,873,37,164,20,13,298,118,216,0.115,0.861,0.024,-0.9489,0,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,9,10,1,3,8,0,19,0,0,8,0,38,40,13,0,3,6,6,2,1,0,2,0,2,1,1,13,10,0,2,10,0,0,2,2,7,0,0,12,6,40,3,22,23,2,23,0,2,2,0,18,10,0,4,12,120,53,3,0.0,0.11660656982435133,0.0960395746465081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723962366269376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10860422658377114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528777881697034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200544041928664,0.11196212255523552,0.0,0.0,0.08217303981313577,0.17997998188189968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022001687353605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11038163126904102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347001654833957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070447153276376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291951339772638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783328289074496,0.0,0.04976195989408665,0.0703082309439789,0.0,0.0,0.08995021188255219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051418167034120624,0.0,0.0,0.08254646118536302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744706468087548,0.0870287220578124,0.0,0.08816118052410092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871902084906073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109940172138638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692899954411536,0.0,0.0,0.04808096392255823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312336155398987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917992763443832,0.0,0.0,0.576316680450698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095050543913796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546967691238195,0.0,0.0,0.09394896865382572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06304764906262915,0.0,0.0,0.10566168365163278,0.0,0.08404651214336999,0.09361591453704077,0.07826415393965791,0.0,0.09960199242888253,0.15684922047879754,0.08959400189975944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141052479770251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786366955098874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20577101897736347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306083827941251,0.0,0.07813111177572601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363566715184325,0.0,0.0,0.10245426580947747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164783759559193,0.0,0.0,0.06991172459670464,0.0,0.0,0.12675303168756022
mentalhealth,StarvingMasochist,2020/03/23,"Picking At My Skin I pick at my skin when I can't get something off my mind; when I think about it so much I get lost in the thought. I don't realize I'm doing it. I don't even feel it. I hate that I do it and I'm afraid to tell anyone. Today was the worst. I went deeper than I ever have. My desk is a mess. My clothes are a mess. My slippers are a mess. My floor and doorways are a mess. There's blood everywhere. I've washed it countless times and have kept consistent pressure and it hasn't stopped in over an hour. 

My mom walked in to say goodnight and asked why I had three tissues soaked in blood on my desk and I was too ashamed of myself to even tell her. I just told her I got a nosebleed and hid the wound. I don't want my mother to find out. I don't want my girlfriend to find out. I hate that I do it. I feel like they'd be upset if they found out and I hate it enough myself. I just want to fix it without worrying them. It makes me feel like I have OCD. I'm going to get the help I need but I have to wait until this quarantine is under control to go to the doctor. 

So my question is, does anyone else do this? If so, how do you personally control it or stop it entirely?",-0.37429116684841546,1.482022034351143,1.7959269356597611,98.85276717557251,86.29007633587787,4.811559432933478,18.89912758996729,5.985473137389443,-0.3890735005452557,911,25,227,7,28,305,131,262,0.132,0.8340000000000001,0.034,-0.9462,0,1,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,3,3,14,15,3,4,11,0,26,7,4,6,1,44,55,19,0,6,7,2,5,2,1,0,3,1,0,1,16,11,0,6,10,0,0,4,7,13,0,1,10,6,45,2,28,43,3,27,0,1,0,0,17,14,0,4,11,154,61,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17529315633140155,0.12843434021313335,0.0,0.0,0.11718391662585788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811779785349737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829949019504458,0.109693307631911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471257838309447,0.0,0.0,0.12951849713570396,0.0,0.16558298989056106,0.11338488484309027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013988736297208,0.17909797150046974,0.0,0.0,0.22913249654992465,0.0,0.0,0.13743814853937975,0.0,0.0,0.1964682361604484,0.0,0.1424768701705838,0.0,0.10025263763797558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3712670464040581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401845009671878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12344301235914627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12247788048000804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683268322110614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367108990660388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265662412826161,0.1468066356168841,0.0,0.0,0.09214556236453987,0.0929443164775591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944946587719656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041899528467836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09968214975400136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649939098075416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20959389945668075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21912020908700955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08031825054708737,0.0,0.09951269888484762,0.07309171209464535,0.0,0.11881571117392213,0.11977585314876757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22180135984198315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11619930532705243,0.11310751481790048,0.0,0.0,0.12083147054444075,0.0,0.0,0.1272974753714098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MEME_Lord06,2020/03/23,I've been feeling wierd lately I've been feeling reasonably ok I guess. It's mainly when I'm with my friends that I feel perfectly fine and the same with my family. But I think this quarantine is taking a toll on me with not being able to interact with many people. I felt just fine before this quarantine. I feel nothing the other times of day. I'm not exactly sad or happy or angry. Is this normal? I'm 14. Any recommendations for what to do?,0.7413333333333334,3.2509759111111163,3.199444444444445,85.48250000000002,89.88888888888891,6.555555555555558,19.72222222222221,7.793537801064563,1.1772222222222228,352,11,69,8,12,121,62,90,0.035,0.723,0.242,0.9470000000000001,0,2,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,7,0,0,3,1,6,0,0,1,2,23,17,5,0,1,6,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,5,8,6,9,13,2,5,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,3,4,43,15,0,0.2326085473670745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15818178869657798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979327413803368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001326982676386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192826368271053,0.0,0.4704554826145234,0.0,0.2233406833637467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17971278668535187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562445394443437,0.0,0.0,0.2476161240106136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623925731452311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23582855767505326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22790698894881165,0.22319417468592248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612614785968287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391603275922096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748926791291414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904616483133576,0.0,0.0,0.13563591455812785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bigge245,2020/03/23,"What are some ways I can curtail the effects of losing to people in a video game? It’s a serious issue I have, letting them get to me. It doesn’t happen on every game I play, just a few. How can I condition my mind to not be so affected by a damn game? I really don’t want any hate, this has an actual impact on my mental health.",2.320416666666663,2.805666875,5.103777777777778,84.119,74.69444444444444,8.537777777777778,22.73333333333333,8.841846274778883,1.3685133333333337,253,6,57,5,5,92,56,72,0.18600000000000005,0.757,0.057,-0.8427,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,2,3,5,2,0,6,0,9,1,0,3,0,9,13,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,9,1,8,11,2,4,0,1,0,0,4,3,1,1,0,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.2751905441310164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19176912881593056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375964918106713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14733294494920604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493709646910349,0.0,0.0,0.2784158313745538,0.0,0.29975196686714706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29433390317705044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883632920171329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31548497655998425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28418887060937503,0.0,0.2847388070012138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955027409723031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806559110198757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16633043680694767,0.22383784207236915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,teen20000003,2020/03/23,"I heard my parents have sex 16f My parents hate each other. They have a pretty rocky relationship and are planning to divorce/separate after I go to college in a couple of years. My dad came home after getting some money (coronavirus affected his business), so he was happy and had sex. But I hate my dad. He made my mom suffer and always complains that she never does anything good. He never treats her like a wife. They don't get one because of me. My mom uses me as an outlet to rant. (I know its not good) So now I hate men. I pretty sure my dad cheats and I have trust issues due to him. I heard them have sex and I never cried so hard before. Yeah, I have cried due to my anxiety and depression at night, but today it really traumatized for some reason. I can't even sniff and snot is dripping like a waterfall. My shirt is wet with snot. (I know disgusting) I feel broken. I hate that I heard it. It was disgusting. Help me. I hate it. Please help. I don't even understand myself. I hate my dad and so does my mom, hearing them broke me. I didn't feel betrayed by my mom, but I felt disgusted. If they hate each other, why would they have sex?  Why of all days today? My dad never sleeps with my mom in the same bed. (He chose to take the night job so that he sleeps in the mornings while my mom sleeps at night, so he can avoid her. He will wait until my mom gets up in the morning, so that he can sleep.) Even after having sex, he left her sleep while hes downstairs so he doesn't sleep next to her. What should I do?  I definitely can act normal in the morning, but what should I do with my feelings",0.5531961722488035,2.814890533333333,2.314417862838916,93.93688995215312,86.0909090909091,5.170653907496012,18.078149920255186,6.5966054737557815,-0.059151515151514726,1236,31,270,14,38,406,154,330,0.19699999999999998,0.7120000000000001,0.091,-0.9904,3,1,0,0,1,0,49.0,0,0,6,1,12,24,11,1,10,1,28,12,7,4,6,46,55,25,0,5,6,15,6,2,0,4,0,4,2,1,13,14,0,2,8,0,1,3,10,16,0,1,10,11,59,8,28,41,6,33,0,3,0,5,48,9,0,3,23,176,72,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05431751362441512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049938399960688384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05371920938058982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03979358696000305,0.0,0.055547780745821895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466200022530949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223017962830011,0.14341224496338492,0.042099675693819866,0.0,0.0562248687646012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425251423785318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12934886356171435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902135625729837,0.0,0.06267825739488238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231704391908343,0.0,0.03709966676443312,0.10950617108881737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694909092338688,0.0584773300952614,0.4511477818586901,0.0,0.0,0.07357438895426455,0.0,0.08751052706086118,0.0,0.06548034786459532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813451195776113,0.06477952110955068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175146879114258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092602850738718,0.0,0.0,0.06378422752243346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617687458448263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5351793701772257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20138933574431206,0.0,0.06942515676078162,0.18378028674263627,0.06395974392252164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044234867065970136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496962547662615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165694519014776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282480449050396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04181951924926496,0.06711787725237231,0.0,0.07008541760200784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3919579896622606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061524861917926214,0.0,0.04908182510162533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375407420598256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795793665411069,0.0,0.05638025884275271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780862685355813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046372462034499226,0.0,0.0,0.04203765665627795
mentalhealth,_e-bone_,2020/03/23,"This quarantine is really taking a toll on me. Being emotionally alone causes me a lot of pain, but physical isolation is a basic need for me. I live with other three people and one of them is the person that I dislike the most in this whole world. I have been home alone with that person all weekend without having a single break from them. I don't like being around them at all and I don't feel comfortable doing anything around them either. There's not a place in the house where I can have some privacy.
I also can't stand being trapped in a place for too long. I need to go for a walk outside at least every three days. I've been home 24/7 an entire week.
I feel very stressed and depressed and my bad emotions just keep building up and I'm afraid of how they might come out.",3.575991561181436,4.950465354430381,4.332341772151898,87.45311181434599,72.67088607594937,7.0388185654008435,23.29324894514768,7.492282038375204,0.8894413502109697,618,16,126,7,12,198,103,158,0.201,0.7759999999999999,0.023,-0.9814,0,5,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,5,0,8,7,0,2,11,0,17,1,0,2,2,29,26,8,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,2,2,5,11,0,1,2,1,0,3,5,5,0,3,2,2,18,2,21,20,9,23,0,1,0,0,7,14,0,4,5,97,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30273332401768765,0.0,0.11687559146269505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202684716516425,0.2602078341162417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202861205746753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15013565279239852,0.0,0.12589473384707872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425424743043608,0.0,0.1258782307689003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32879672068646265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313714030070033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779501678271995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306005006387564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931994514326676,0.0,0.0,0.16863674059952466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299042675180807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140119566219383,0.0,0.1290525636451975,0.12933758573526352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124250960662144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15504137659154585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21673579916616234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990345896203767,0.0,0.15551322476376614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132156523363584,0.2552239701599319,0.3053899525924606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362702324380927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16741359962983718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988613121656646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058852910627813,0.0,0.0,0.11723220207478073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631705426434864,0.0,0.14088276898133434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shitpostingslattern,2020/03/23,"Quarantine is just bullshit I would rather die from fucking corona than lock myself up this long, it fucking kills me, i am just too lonely for this, i miss hanging out with people who are barely close, fucking around and keeping myself busy with meaningless laughs and talks, just to forget about this painful shit, i cant stay alone for this long.",15.176250000000005,8.998941625000004,11.824375,67.28312500000003,54.625,14.05,46.0625,8.841846274778883,4.4003999999999985,280,9,49,2,2,81,49,64,0.337,0.601,0.062,-0.9681,0,4,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,7,9,5,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,0,14,10,2,2,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,8,0,0,0,0,7,1,11,9,0,8,0,2,0,3,2,4,4,0,2,36,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274513016327368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955008116692052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279220838507664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6090819298002755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19520080804126064,0.24296760689092325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886985659207123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336821392781742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522509751487434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254280676747529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23407665830924526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17651541970605972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560057216671898,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mercuryxsaturn,2020/03/23,"Paranoia is in control of my life I'm just so tired. My paranoid behaviour has been uncontrollable lately. I can't enjoy anything because when I start to get relaxed or happy I remember all those things that make me feel fear, desperation, hopelessness. This weekend was a nightmare. I spent most of it lying on my bed, crying and vomiting out of fear. I constantly feel like there is no safe place in this world for me and that I won't find peace while I'm alive.",3.5583333333333336,5.741936333333335,4.3997222222222225,83.55625000000002,74.55555555555556,7.6111111111111125,27.91666666666667,8.472884824447931,2.129333333333334,370,15,70,7,8,119,69,90,0.336,0.5329999999999999,0.13,-0.9703,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,1,4,9,0,3,1,0,7,3,0,2,1,14,15,6,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,7,3,0,2,4,2,1,0,3,4,0,0,3,2,11,5,9,11,2,12,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,2,7,46,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18124599488573004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342616233894836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380107065354299,0.2470277558359605,0.0,0.0,0.2419329632443981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4956822626134307,0.2227288206798412,0.15734578577258987,0.0,0.0,0.20130341183450293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150709068674532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344589416864613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484502382541991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556824002643618,0.1076024378301664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701778336745785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301131170355673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494989539477773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15589323330796911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632351518125486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531435941558897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,texas_turtle254,2020/03/23,"Isolation (how do you cope) I do isolate alot when I feel the need. *not answering the phone on bad days or stay in my room*
But not being able to leave the house even when I want to I feel is making this issue I have way worse. 
Is anyone else feeling this way?
How do you cope?",-0.8184322033898291,1.3149616271186453,1.0862499999999995,100.41039194915257,93.74576271186442,4.3059322033898315,14.154661016949152,5.985473137389443,-0.93325593220339,212,4,51,2,8,69,41,59,0.203,0.752,0.045,-0.8708,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,0,5,1,0,0,4,0,7,0,0,3,0,14,13,6,0,2,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,8,0,4,12,1,9,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,3,34,10,0,0.24494723255572035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17127280030979386,0.2509773862780697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20452070773128744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579707010194829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046219818579267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617853369506837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3715580418630555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826362191243305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25566127149924545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593637516881776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16350417977737594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816252692249527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26108115863805903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14447622412532465,0.3888554236950793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496221564018009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mmvvvpp,2020/03/23,"Nagging feeling of meaningless I've just had a serious existential crisis and although it's over I still that everything I do has to have some sort of meaning and significance but I end up feeling that whatever I do is pointless so I should do something else but whatever I do I still have that nagging feeling that it's meaningless cause one day I'm gonna die and one day no one will remember.
Can someone help me and is there a way to stop it?",2.982666666666667,5.0232878777777765,4.661944444444448,81.67625000000005,75.7777777777778,8.5,32.361111111111114,9.188382445141503,3.1357777777777787,359,19,70,9,8,121,55,90,0.265,0.635,0.10099999999999999,-0.9517,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,2,0,2,0,13,0,0,1,0,17,19,8,1,1,3,0,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,3,0,3,1,3,8,0,6,15,1,9,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,6,53,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261744647190689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839818998829691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285009177808227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18392315407483614,0.0,0.19500460283668866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19787392229343115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33397255935470205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14757480506050236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398288544274776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4475771386634044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494088370240921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18654868820975806,0.16949704256682252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35165488955671353,0.1840713487250948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17476009995534902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pleaseineedhelp_-,2020/03/23,"Racism against China is making me hate being Chinese I don’t think anyone will see this and I’m gonna post this elsewhere too. I’m sorry this is so long but I’m so lost and scared.

This pandemic has incited a lot of anger, racism and blame onto Asia, particularly China. I am of Chinese descent living outside China and have been subject to many hurtful comments about China, not just for this pandemic. 

It hurts to see people call us disgusting as a blanket term without realizing that they’re hating on a billion propel for the actions of a few. 

I had a friend who asked for my opinions on China’s re-education camps and when my opinion didn’t align with his, I politely asked that we end the conversation because I hated talking about politics because I valued my friendships more. He kept pressing about it and eventually resorted to calling my entire family murderers because they were Han-Chinese. He called every Chinese person brainwashed and said it was his goal to “enlighten” them. He proceeded to compare me with other Asian girls, specifically pointing out how another girl was “better” than me because she was Korean. 

I had another friend repeatedly tell me, unprompted and randomly, that Chinese girls were not pretty or “worthy”. He said: 
“Korean girls? Hell ya. Japanese girls? Hell ya. Chinese girl? Nah.” 
We were discussing math. 
He kept mentioning how Korea and Japan were better than China which meant by extension, the people were better too. 

I know a lot of you will say these incidents are jokes but if you look online, anti-Chinese sentiment is very strong. Korea and Japan are praised while China is repeatedly put down. I’m not saying China is perfect or anything, I don’t mean to get political. It’s just, and maybe I’m just a weak person, I can’t handle all this. 

I have gone home crying repeatedly wishing I wasn’t Chinese. I prayed to every God out there that I was anything but Chinese, and I still can’t shake how terrible it feels to be Chinese. This feeling has been going on for years and I wish I could escape. 

I even went and changed my name (not legally) at school so that it would be a Japanese/Korean name because I don’t want to be known as Chinese. I don’t want people judging me because I’m Chinese. I keep lying when people ask if I’m Chinese. I make excuses about my Chinese last name and when people say I look half white, or I look Korean or Japanese (I get that a lot), I am so irrationally happy. It’s pathetic and I hate myself. Please, please help me. I love my culture and country but it feels like I shouldn’t. I love being Chinese but I also fucking hate being Chinese. I wish I could be reborn as anything but Chinese. 

Tl;dr 
Racism against China has made me hate being Chinese and it’s taking a massive mental toll. I know I’m pathetic but... please help me.",3.3905859094176884,5.886912682242991,4.743995327102802,79.37538910855501,76.38317757009347,7.180805176132279,28.232386772106395,8.20175343628119,2.3145017972681527,2235,96,383,41,52,740,245,535,0.20800000000000002,0.631,0.161,-0.9904,0,0,0,0,0,0,65.0,3,4,2,8,23,32,12,2,13,0,49,4,0,6,2,85,103,46,1,11,21,0,4,1,2,5,1,5,1,8,26,24,0,3,11,1,0,6,14,19,0,2,24,15,62,13,40,64,7,30,4,3,6,3,55,9,3,12,15,253,88,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05586368304486355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464998599006229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04884482146735519,0.0,0.17245619114873967,0.0,0.19591731723790445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555007982581344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18534541800781693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21399184229353968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389820695275871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11154839412961128,0.0,0.07673335049557349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187153221423445,0.0,0.0,0.0461391177413952,0.0,0.11771310143923178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585386073098794,0.0,0.1059636217002008,0.04990501983184849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794088394044722,0.0645805903862762,0.07299357731243952,0.0,0.03970067875070287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436283137273164,0.0,0.41380902661218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364578243270444,0.0,0.07007109448079415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14956422437847638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062091072532638514,0.0,0.0,0.07678187597898119,0.05694182603542897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034128030614247004,0.0,0.061683978847743515,0.061820212457353224,0.1759839139302278,0.0,0.07625589181814305,0.17816678908526395,0.1260952301869965,0.06609927661048985,0.09325861965176956,0.07082284862238138,0.07017957179328352,0.07609347921412685,0.0,0.0,0.0703982476740416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24214618873727575,0.12199083483583492,0.0,0.23004217633389154,0.06603633996969338,0.0,0.06690257644108276,0.07106849404719967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022440475710545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289778476349925,0.16665648255011128,0.06993787357017386,0.07069783069091265,0.11133210654725928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781978839486655,0.0,0.0,0.05578695710511652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05252289146504913,0.05614747109951206,0.06105707556837023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044760796036165694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402796392092544,0.0,0.0,0.05763837670921752,0.08240555839473293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475705546199734,0.0,0.0,0.24099227548132,0.06733852855297041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049623578287117526,0.0,0.0,0.04498486503774229
mentalhealth,Engineering_Geek,2020/03/23,"What do hugs/kisses/hand holding feel like? Hi Reddit, because of Tiger parent upbringing (Indian parents) and autism (Aspergers), I've never been able to form social connections beyond acquaintances. My parents have never hugged me since 6th grade because my grades dictate that I haven't earnt it. Recently with my therapist, we've been talking about chronic isolation in conjunction with autism and how to get out of it. One thing my therapist brought up was touch starvation, and how people go haywire from it within a month or two. Apparently, my mental health has been charred by not having any form of positive touch (so lol bullies beating me up at school don't count XD) for the past 10 years.

​

I've been constantly dreaming and wondering what positive unconditional human touch feels like. Whether it be kissing, hand-holding, or even a bro-fist or whatever it's called. I tried to pay some people to give me a hug but that ended up scaring them away and got the cops called on me. Yes, I talked about that scenario with my therapist and it still seems like I have to keep myself isolated for the sake of my own physical safety until further notice.

​

Long story short, can someone please tell me what it's like to be touched in a loving way? This will help me understand what I've been missing out on. Daydreaming and dreaming can only fill the void so much, I need an actual testimony for how it feels. What makes a loving hug different from a bully trying to squeeze your chest and trying to suffocate you? Aside from the strength applied. Are there any psychological differences? Are there any fight or flight responses? I'm super curious!",7.894092409240925,8.541864498349838,7.331435643564358,72.48183993399341,62.432343234323426,10.825742574257426,35.975247524752476,10.62613485830676,3.99530891089109,1345,58,223,31,18,420,186,303,0.071,0.742,0.187,0.9914,5,1,0,0,1,0,46.0,0,2,1,3,12,15,1,1,12,2,20,9,1,4,2,36,38,20,0,1,7,3,8,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,18,13,0,2,6,2,1,3,5,3,0,2,8,8,22,12,38,27,5,30,0,1,0,6,19,15,0,7,15,143,40,4,0.0967095441199468,0.0,0.09437456454161314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20956950129828325,0.2350253629856695,0.19729741893941924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086180018421013,0.0,0.0,0.11790648093996793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19750251464342405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104508660498686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20208178005626515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08565595117680219,0.0,0.0,0.06387574180179165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14669775391114967,0.13817863528554122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05052674526343809,0.0927726069889969,0.0549622625956846,0.0,0.07734745701770841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279772305734047,0.0,0.0,0.0648223688739015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595988634894959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18898959307697968,0.0,0.0,0.08558490327427729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17456827872189207,0.0,0.06455437166198179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09746047414537504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719263545367164,0.0,0.07109264247092521,0.07170890156275653,0.14917672475916774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010445696710204,0.0,0.0,0.06553288995835001,0.07355196620218019,0.0,0.0,0.3221535118268113,0.0,0.09232020277550072,0.13409244205112472,0.0,0.0,0.10615803811265467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548900769211252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968231247804455,0.09787522172553276,0.0,0.08804073681034036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999913426487383,0.0,0.0,0.09858320131021586,0.08194168289849825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723236685900042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546293654238133,0.08452840420653791,0.0,0.0,0.3368617038321603,0.06424952387079165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969782968287289,0.0,0.09447117215881884,0.10067804607412097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676353466366538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048773752451278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350253629856695,0.0622777756662926
mentalhealth,centralscrutinizer0,2020/03/23,"Stay rested I'm worried about a lot of things. I feel helpless and like I'm failing my children. There are no good choices. This list of mostly doable things makes me feel a little bit more 'in control' of the mayhem.

Sip something warm every 20 min
Eat zinc
Eat fruits and vegetables
Wash your hair and clothes daily or expose them to plenty of sunlight 
Avoid cold fluids and foods
Stay hydrated",2.707066666666666,5.579290640000004,2.764000000000003,90.08866666666668,82.6,4.4,23.0,5.82211442006289,0.4950000000000001,318,11,56,2,9,96,61,75,0.175,0.737,0.08800000000000001,-0.7351,0,1,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,1,2,2,6,0,1,3,0,1,7,1,2,0,12,6,5,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,5,2,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,6,5,3,7,6,5,5,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,3,2,30,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23891220296413904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454431501463347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4478476628077575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18437874438849086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22130008504931034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646173255000998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835492303731712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691220189037788,0.21933113381267014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604651740332476,0.0,0.0,0.14607471033013106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684706222935811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4665000573396538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907697913138237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22223855170754792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brooklynlois,2020/03/23,What are some therapy apps/websites for those in isolation/quarantine? What are some therapy apps/ websites? For those who can’t get to their regular therapist or have never been and need support during isolation.,7.596666666666668,10.47952755555556,7.445555555555559,63.05500000000001,65.1111111111111,12.577777777777778,39.77777777777778,11.855464076750405,6.407511111111113,176,10,23,7,3,56,28,36,0.07400000000000001,0.852,0.07400000000000001,0.0,0,3,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,6,8,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,4,7,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,3,1,20,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714627896313036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433445542403445,0.2531160204551793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724197374266571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7506148643701485,0.3810473519708492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,McBunkalds,2020/03/23,"I don’t know 20M, currently sitting in an employee bathroom, wasting time once again and feeling like shit about it. Need to vent for myself and because I really don’t know how to convey this to my family.
I’ll start from the beginning. I was born from a mother whom was heavily addicted to drugs (primarily meth) and myself was addicted to meth from the womb. Weaned off it eventually, my dad had primary custody but I was forced to be over at my mothers for visits (sleeping one room over from where meth was being manufactured). Returned to my fathers with bruises etc, having to be nursed back to health in his words before my next visit each time. My dad eventually got out of there with me, landing on his feet in Montana where he started going to school. 
I’m 7ish years old now, and my grandparents are asking my dad if they can take me to Cali to see my uncle, which my dad agrees to. Not a week later after I’ve been picked up, he’s served with papers saying they’ve taken me into their custody (his mother falsified his signature and reported that he was heavily abusive). Thus begins an almost 8 year journey of my grandparents (primarily grandmother) running around the west coast with my while my dad has to drop his life to try and get me back.
My grandmother is a strange and manipulative person. My memories are hazy likely because I’ve repressed much, but from what I remember and was told by my dad (there were periods where I did see him) I was being brainwashed. Told I was bipolar and given medication even though I was never tested for this (I had emotional outbursts that I remember vividly. Starting something for whatever reason with teachers before being dragged out, literally kicking and screaming). Constantly convinced that my father was a horrible man and I shouldn’t trust him, and always having a voice over my shoulder and in my ear when my dad offered my to come live with him again. Between 6th grade and sophomore year I didn’t complete a single full year of school. My application learning-wise was only a surface level concern. From age 7 to 15 I had no solid grounding in which to learn and develop socially. Primarily I was in my room playing video games, naive to anything. Finally, after the nearly 8 years of this, my dad ends up getting custody back and picks me up from the middle of school in Montana. I had to be convinced of the truth (with shockingly little resistance looking back) and from that day forward real life hit me like a brick wall. I had been perpetually 7 years old in a sense, and now I was thrust into the shoes of an unprepared 15 year old in high school. Things went fairly smooth for a bit in all honestly. Hiccups here and there- fights between my dad and step-mom, step-mom and me, etc. but nothing major. Then comes early 2018. 
Three or so months prior two cousins had come to live at our house. It was the first time i had people to be around that I enjoyed practically 24/7. Then, one day, they had to go. I fell into what I later realized was a depressive slump, finding myself out in the bleachers alone wondering what this terrible feeling was and where it came from. This one day led to a panic attack in 5th period which ultimately led me to be sent home. My dad had asked if I wanted a therapist, which I agreed to then but the concept was shelved because of affairs and family drama. Cut to that summer.

Me and my step-mother had been quarreling much more, and time and time again I’d find myself in my room after becoming emotional and irrationally argumentative and being lectured by my father. One day, when he was out of state to visit my siblings, a fight between my step mother led to me packing a backpack full of things and leaving. I was on a couch at a friends place for a couple days, then anothers, then to my at the time boyfriends which I stayed at for 8 months.

He was the first guy I’d ever had a crush on, and frankly that fact alone was a big reason I stayed. I worked at McDonald’s with hardly an aspiration and even so things seemed fine. Overtime it would go sour though. He showed himself to be emotionally unavailable, dissmissive, hateful to others (racist especially), zero aspirations or drive to anything, told me specifically once that he was a pathological liar, and said he had thought about killing people, even in the face of this I stayed. I didn’t look deeper. I ignored these issues because I didn’t have anywhere else to go in my mind. My staying with him led to the ending of a very good friendship, partially sparked by the insecurity of making mature decisions. Near the tail end of things he hardly talked to me at all- I felt alone even though I was ‘supposed’ to feel at home with him. After 8 months I broke it off, realizing that the relationship was built on fake feelings, the eagerness of being with my first boyfriend, and partially sex. Through unprecedented means (having met friends at another McDonalds and through them getting a car and a new place to stay) I landed on my feet once more. Through a few of these friends we got ourselves a house, rented from the mom of another friend. There we stayed for nearly 8 months through several ups and downs I don’t find particularly important  to the overall here. Through this time though I realized I very likely have depression and anxiety, which is certainly important now.Now to today.

I feel neutral these days, but quite often empty. My head is near-silent lest it be paranoid anxiety thoughts or suicidal, hopeless ones. I feel no drive to truly better myself but desire it more than anything. I feel incomplete, not all there, like i only exist on the surface of myself and my subconscious is an enigma I’ll never learn. I fear I’ll never truly learn, and always be naive and unmotivated to change. I’m getting a counselor soon because frankly I don’t know how to truly be introspective. Deep down I fear I’ll never change though and this won’t ever get better, and even saying all this I can’t truly express how it feels.",6.906277095089923,7.2763514946996475,7.062681293180741,74.51943700226785,64.53003533568904,10.00909234745003,34.033331575338856,9.82334261429958,3.2928200358630875,4780,194,849,92,67,1541,468,1132,0.115,0.782,0.10300000000000001,-0.9358,6,3,5,0,3,1,128.0,3,0,4,7,45,44,8,5,53,0,80,21,10,14,13,151,140,71,2,7,13,19,12,5,4,3,10,6,7,3,45,69,0,2,31,5,1,25,18,22,0,11,60,24,121,22,161,62,18,194,0,4,5,2,76,78,1,10,89,595,166,13,0.0,0.05224243187225908,0.0,0.09613472075319036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044152294475139166,0.13699967437319532,0.0,0.0,0.0733770256906281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870457037808326,0.06746132163194629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885317304991647,0.07850339053125785,0.08244111734393887,0.0501616124089426,0.0,0.1356177197309979,0.0,0.13439196945190754,0.04869672951192467,0.07503898214169112,0.0,0.0,0.0779925101597276,0.0481376172613553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504301020341964,0.0,0.0,0.09328808964091484,0.11394541779181312,0.04623017339924093,0.04764835519550535,0.0,0.0,0.048787540082119586,0.0,0.17061618502898446,0.0,0.07595365407038658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051133330364116464,0.0,0.036833646674522436,0.1487944672598647,0.11715866896023752,0.0,0.09834964105809764,0.14561348405122965,0.07976842612474652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313301656967177,0.09923269779294867,0.17835604312950196,0.031499708555725085,0.04233573847755083,0.04830120573651926,0.12089930670068,0.1125152373124176,0.0,0.0,0.13626310126026833,0.0,0.11518262188497695,0.0,0.10023519191658742,0.03698271788003345,0.07052964008653027,0.0,0.0,0.043658531808377726,0.0,0.0,0.07899648320409547,0.04353223977578485,0.045251651179458084,0.04686829204539402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04658617334094939,0.08845679499828935,0.0,0.0,0.10175370737907063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04602114033525848,0.0,0.0,0.04878184588429446,0.0,0.07269629559859102,0.0,0.0,0.0466876173474557,0.0,0.0,0.0622877085305895,0.10770690218657962,0.04419229341147633,0.07786901449226262,0.0,0.07405323175873194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029432102714697476,0.0,0.0,0.04802968571723617,0.0,0.04441858000731495,0.0,0.0,0.04452088072237638,0.15492189656540864,0.1407769306399234,0.0,0.06482615821651076,0.03269404847442965,0.13602749349784907,0.04258483524828514,0.04689290038601808,0.0,0.0,0.042307966765851725,0.0,0.1388030629753326,0.14087129979045598,0.1493911797751291,0.06706870405201204,0.0,0.051733077634422565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06113640991470789,0.03849989196223172,0.09213460768432656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04689782762339215,0.0,0.05018694634997156,0.028246800466063062,0.09066891827011124,0.0,0.04733887051127245,0.09989647063915642,0.0,0.04194208820933205,0.07012829099409315,0.0,0.17849595650211833,0.07027206723792426,0.0401401786148225,0.0,0.04981200263086465,0.045260343121546025,0.0,0.0,0.044124367934014766,0.044946776371688674,0.0,0.033944579787613616,0.0,0.0,0.09362674807397586,0.2819805886933358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048230065668477394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03315209129718018,0.035439901271152686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05119481977017496,0.1171724570932022,0.0,0.21660340892610955,0.07000907908011918,0.17997494071784947,0.0,0.04179455794461569,0.12639689108448482,0.0,0.029935930056944792,0.0,0.04307198987413805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276190147135325,0.02600691354849749,0.0,0.03536836380646621,0.0,0.0,0.04087421227068745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047816462327684134,0.032099883222880966,0.0,0.0,0.031322064569922266,0.0,0.0,0.1987589825667676
mentalhealth,party_atthemoontower,2020/03/23,"Anxiety is through the roof With the pandemic news EVERYWHERE I am feeling overwhelmed. I am an at risk person though I don’t look like one. I am trying to stay at home, but there are somethings I have to do. I drove by the grocery stores around me and the parking lots were all packed. I can’t get myself to even try to go in. My husband isn’t sure about his work and I am terrified of him leaving the house and getting sick. Every tickle of my throat, every sneeze, every time I adjust my eyeglasses, I start going through every scenario all of which lead to me in the hospital or dying. I am scared and I’m trying to manage it.",2.6026349431818185,4.395025414062502,3.8825568181818175,87.95221590909092,76.109375,6.529545454545455,24.91761363636364,7.348242739294969,1.145521875,495,17,100,6,11,162,83,128,0.131,0.8140000000000001,0.055,-0.9127,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,3,7,0,13,2,1,1,3,16,22,7,1,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,6,0,0,2,0,1,4,3,3,0,1,2,2,19,2,19,20,3,12,0,1,1,0,4,5,0,2,3,73,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248851544349596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15417423520860962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17974203106789266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11438918695222725,0.0,0.5836741847873749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756916853602603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18096739535210746,0.0,0.1968537148541992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17372190711222654,0.0,0.0,0.19983595496505888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833813202090971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461101697100606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454344875280571,0.0,0.0,0.14723843268656905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735682106403615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122127487035725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17339162269421268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332875415487114,0.0,0.0,0.1225835146031206,0.18459560073887668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16322784920599928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701565483415081,0.0,0.10098744472459084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3527503021630785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608308794517126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SeanTheSamuraii,2020/03/23,My girlfriend was raped My girlfriend was allegedly raped. She hasn’t texted me in 7 hours. I couldn’t do anything about it. I feel god awful now. I don’t know if she is okay or not.,-0.3807692307692321,1.8146432307692355,1.0673846153846152,101.30261538461541,91.05128205128204,4.1456410256410265,18.056410256410253,5.6839178017228535,-0.5951989743589747,142,4,34,1,5,45,29,39,0.282,0.625,0.09300000000000001,-0.8807,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,2,7,2,0,0,0,6,9,2,0,2,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,1,8,1,2,6,0,3,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,2,2,22,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5542160787870225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3405313692803653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6632414472799243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37012660963514576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,airick13,2020/03/23,"COVID-19 and access to medications the past month has been a nightmare for me. I'm in a state where I cant get my meds, so im rationing out my doses so i don't withdraw from everything instantly... going from 300mg effexor... 500mg seroquel... 200mg trazodone..  1200mg lithium, 8mg prazosin.. to nothing in 1 month is fucking with me. paranoia, night terrors, anxiety, a constant free fall feeling, pressure in what i can't describe any better than my 'mind.' night sweats... constantly jaw clenching... headaches.. I feel like I'm sitting here in isolation waiting to die.. i felt so great when i moved here, ready to get back on my feet... i have the scripts sitting at the pharmacy but can't afford them... i literally want to crawl into a ball and just stop breathing but i know my brain won't let me.. 2 years of work undone like it was nothing...",2.2335294117647067,4.651625853658537,3.42601147776184,87.68225968436155,80.09756097560975,6.053945480631278,29.76901004304161,7.285733465282438,1.8774394548063127,656,33,127,9,17,212,113,164,0.08800000000000001,0.8140000000000001,0.098,0.3582,1,1,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,1,2,9,8,1,2,7,0,11,8,5,0,0,16,23,8,1,1,3,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,4,1,1,3,5,3,0,0,3,3,18,6,19,18,0,26,0,0,0,1,1,9,1,0,13,70,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227293299304883,0.0,0.1263002285526018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695088521432488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460165858046283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843050059125694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568265788909808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17134662222149713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483802714666556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16695795802736266,0.11794670764482758,0.15852086251229836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526312992056844,0.1725147520676084,0.0,0.09382952588112273,0.0,0.0,0.18202215173170905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17833517410415808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907340534983098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16882484038069562,0.0,0.16131799417835116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833876908859237,0.1663198013674626,0.0,0.0,0.16670285356332218,0.0,0.2635607794902184,0.17547403307180226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3098683209357901,0.0,0.316833749642553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15760560876826915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13803009702592678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737962570740774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019398640544328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631829709568692
mentalhealth,gaminede20ans,2020/03/23,"Is my mental health declining because of quarantine? Hey guys, I'll try to make this as short as possible. I was depressed for a long time, it resulted in a suicide attempt in 2018. After that, I sought help, beat depression and eliminated any suicidal thoughts.

When my mental health was at its worst (just before the attempt), I hallucinated a lot. I kept seeing shadow figures everywhere, sometimes shadows of family and friends.

Now I've been in quarantine for 11 days and this is the first time since my suicide attempt that I've spent all this time alone at home, I've started hallucinating again. It's the first time since 2018. I'm freaked out and I don't know what to do. I don't want to sink back into depression. What should I do? Thank you!",3.7334265734265735,6.056793251748253,4.5433566433566455,82.08118881118884,74.52447552447552,8.036363636363637,29.181818181818183,8.841846274778883,2.5203538461538457,597,26,112,13,13,192,89,143,0.222,0.7240000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.98,0,3,0,0,0,2,21.0,0,1,0,6,5,7,0,0,6,0,10,2,0,2,1,17,20,7,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,10,6,0,1,3,0,1,0,2,5,0,2,6,1,11,2,17,13,3,22,0,3,1,0,5,8,0,1,14,68,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282722390139818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377962592909032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603986383346173,0.0,0.08406515708571506,0.0,0.11734636836970425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893683934589333,0.0,0.3563302119186156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000386342726553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346025866917512,0.0,0.0,0.10654448940613917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654689895426886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931715599677369,0.0,0.0,0.09243431876874024,0.0,0.13832921708709547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578857494199764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204093075394275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11724127058717193,0.0,0.0,0.09205216458113397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779501178684385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554663329700156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989184091851599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281516583340972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363908396198778,0.0,0.09760934521562584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.452534633937983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696371484427568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948057860708976,0.3216523326641699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936279404568367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133950568941607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oxfordconjunction,2020/03/23,eating disorder/bdd and quarantine anyone with an ED and/or BDD really going through it with this quarantine? being stuck inside with food has been tough and lots of time to just think. does anyone agree? or any advice?,4.821153846153845,7.850080794871798,4.550961538461539,79.80028846153847,74.38461538461539,8.002564102564103,20.006410256410245,8.841846274778883,1.722379487179488,177,4,28,4,4,54,33,39,0.09699999999999999,0.843,0.06,0.0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,9,6,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,17,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283895921897668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285292965070313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4699557057488481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29408447473340144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34386872201056784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4063597026323372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19098811235766733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857024094885596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21528578927235248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153308258595577,0.0,0.0,0.19595669255273326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SmeethGoder,2020/03/23,"Lost in the fog I constantly feel really disorientated & out of it & like too much is going on, even if there's nothing going on. It's like my head is filled with static & there's no space for anything. I can't think straight. 

I usually get something like 5 or 6 hours sleep; I end up going to bed late cos of my OCD rituals & thus end up waking up late but still having not slept much.

Emotionally, I just always feel ""grey"", like I'm just a machine. I don't really ever want anything or feel like doing anything, or have any thoughts for the future or anything. It's like I'm just stumbling through fog.

My terrible mental health seems pretty impervious to any treatments we've tried; the guy who was reassessing me said that something should've worked in the almost 6 years I've been with the NHS (UK). They think I need deeper treatment than just CBT or the like, but we don't know how long we have to wait to get an appointment, & now COVID-19 makes it look like it'll be even longer.

Medication isn't doing anything at all. I'm on Sertraline (200mg), Propranolol (not sure) & Vortioxetine (not sure) but they aren't making a dent. Also waiting for an appointment with the psychiatrist.

I make everyone around me's lives a nightmare with my neuroses. The frustration & the exasperation is visible (and fair enough). It just seems that it would be better for everyone if I'd died before shit went sideways, or never existed at all. I'm just a complete waste of space, a horrible, selfish pile of shit.

Maybe this is just the way things are now & nothing will ever improve. I don't even know if that's necessarily bad; I don't want to put my family through any more of my crap, but I don't care if I'm supposed to die or whatever. Life just doesn't seem to appeal. 

If you read all that, sorry for ranting & being depressing. I don't know if I'm expecting any response really, just spouting crap across the aether.",6.1803507516105975,6.149042254593179,6.649655213552853,78.23342340730136,66.08661417322834,10.076879026485326,31.753877356239556,9.800150414767053,2.8159805774278217,1533,55,303,30,22,500,193,381,0.179,0.741,0.08,-0.9917,0,0,2,0,0,0,68.0,2,1,2,3,23,22,5,0,18,0,28,11,8,6,8,73,65,20,2,11,29,0,3,8,0,3,3,1,1,1,14,9,0,2,12,1,0,6,15,10,0,0,7,6,25,12,37,52,7,39,1,2,2,0,8,16,4,18,24,173,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647457731638492,0.0,0.0,0.05170707985954821,0.05380074033840308,0.6305134708287096,0.0,0.17587897112239073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26604064161087976,0.05755944030034316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053986834289683816,0.0,0.0,0.055019302778564726,0.0,0.0,0.057184857902733165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592326851376243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677928147520862,0.06987246379360404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05568994902604346,0.0,0.13420985280343448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727316888039835,0.11453581585964495,0.06680912818067647,0.0,0.12811824690044907,0.11697395310719745,0.0,0.12356722017213675,0.0,0.0,0.0609539265991852,0.0,0.09807927352478807,0.04619177800657003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675624041525749,0.0,0.11024010885527946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640217100998806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635789096316465,0.06872856419855526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367522954709746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660324498716027,0.0,0.14587436447397514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04566994643605995,0.2527095541484861,0.0,0.05709430969264063,0.0572204066799443,0.054296541125405454,0.0,0.07058198230208405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947940319436185,0.0,0.06495777803103264,0.0,0.0,0.06513625938586821,0.06516018307512246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506232427701654,0.04794318101690547,0.049868332680976415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408243113108892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578055897684425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499927514533532,0.0,0.0,0.06467562322915751,0.0,0.12426495320260235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061504684218588575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765869880770333,0.0,0.0,0.13274127398817884,0.0,0.0,0.06470482114723522,0.0,0.0,0.09955396833605146,0.0,0.07237947821904492,0.0,0.0,0.05163606280378745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187903677957035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042955985743158884,0.0828606324921419,0.0,0.051331329519960237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438986231623174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121179076176716,0.0,0.07627407568822832,0.051322610689508025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059938730419074326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047071885673007234,0.0,0.0,0.04593127745171919,0.0,0.0,0.041637713129467735
mentalhealth,KingHenryIXI,2020/03/23,"Is it normal that feels that these last couple weeks, due to COVID-19 don’t feel real at all? My heads been buzzing. My stomachs been aching. It’s like I’m disassociating from all that’s going on around me. It’s like I’m scared, but not scared. I’ve become numb and it’s like I’m a copilot in my own body. Is anybody else feeling this way?",0.10166666666666656,2.3868980555555592,1.624444444444446,97.665,89.27777777777777,3.7555555555555564,17.722222222222218,5.033348758259628,-0.8235111111111113,268,7,62,1,9,86,51,72,0.154,0.731,0.115,-0.594,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,2,1,0,5,4,3,0,2,11,12,2,0,1,2,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,3,4,3,6,10,3,9,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,6,31,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20318135821059885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520723646632151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25352239903781537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525424339141664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19066464030490235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462139295151636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971364864809967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342393592351564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860454845651747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33451856578671096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22362604503882175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597862806898639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.457014693196707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811657252467389,0.18307979177085484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cluelessAly,2020/03/23,"The time has come for to be honest with myself. I have been lying to myself for the longest time and it seems like today I have had it with myself.   


I am mad at myself for letting myself go. I use my social anxiety as an excuse to be me. I know that I have gained a lot of weight, I feel uncomfortable with my own body. I don't feel comfortable wearing the clothes that I used to wear, even my leggings that I'd wear whenever I'd gain weight isn't comfortable to wear anymore.   


That being said, I know what my problems are. I know what to do, how to solve my issues. But I do not have the will to do it. I don't want to get up in the morning to go work out. I don't want to stop eating what I currently eat. I want to keep drinking what I currently drink. I am now a fat fuck and I am not happy. I feel like I've been lying to myself whenever I think to myself that I can still lose weight. No, I don't feel it. I am lying to myself all along. My 'confidence' is fake. I try to pretend that I am happy with who I am and what I have become, but in reality, I am not. I hate myself. I hate waking up every morning and seeing myself in the mirror. I don't know who to reach out to because I feel like people are going to judge me. I don't like going to the doctor either because I am too embarrassed to talk about everything that I've become.   


I want to be better than who I am now. I want to change, but I don't know how. And I'm not entirely sure if I have the willpower to. I don't understand why I'm like this. I want to understand why I am the way I am. Do I not deserve to look good and feel good? Why does my brain fight myself? How do I even fight being 'lazy'? How do you even start fighting with yourself? 

I am tired of myself. I don't want to keep letting go.",0.9311515151515161,2.296075119480524,3.395844155844156,91.495670995671,79.62337662337663,6.225108225108228,20.238095238095237,6.980632752743323,0.2573290043290037,1351,33,316,15,33,471,144,385,0.159,0.7240000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.7008,3,0,2,0,4,0,41.0,0,1,0,5,12,25,7,1,12,0,50,19,9,6,2,60,92,15,0,9,10,0,9,5,0,1,3,1,0,0,20,15,8,3,15,3,0,6,16,11,0,0,4,12,70,14,49,80,4,25,0,1,2,1,11,8,1,3,15,232,90,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06386271465301037,0.0,0.08279069166083561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017784506931326,0.1843963483740692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738321352281962,0.0,0.09272853983034976,0.0,0.09319237294027323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831179860017689,0.07191146498391611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544631165898063,0.07305476067419886,0.0,0.0,0.16355914094401308,0.0,0.1708437496579716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16541518292207347,0.0,0.07033631894173824,0.0,0.0750273142448406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532629248911465,0.11927764535194885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717681290047099,0.04361536202660162,0.0,0.23722079944129884,0.1400397562295562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17773409283734815,0.0,0.16484035235330266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713244514453684,0.0,0.14840344626701787,0.0,0.0,0.22939479343302305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072989860951895,0.0,0.2039229292906098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07010299078845222,0.09339385343421652,0.0,0.07097253660925101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05787519436090571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988001531521809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07940952078814728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652352591870267,0.07599794107162443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509833737495398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05908826125839525,0.0,0.066668011627579,0.0697938301530691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867982762410125,0.0,0.0,0.06709884263929702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05349123568392472,0.0,0.0,0.09735685156399433,0.09594909612159384,0.07913019974994802,0.0,0.0,0.0566780997718792,0.0,0.0,0.17381327076419215,0.0,0.14420151167726553,0.0,0.0,0.3446746791028445,0.06626330940853341,0.0,0.30497199992245755,0.0,0.0,0.2259857762663903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060775141460822864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw2678987677,2020/03/23,Anyone for a chat about anxiety anyone able to chat about coping with anxiety,7.1014285714285705,8.965137714285717,7.57,65.72500000000001,64.71428571428571,11.314285714285715,28.285714285714285,11.20814326018867,3.9808,64,2,9,2,1,21,10,14,0.23600000000000002,0.764,0.0,-0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0.4345142673397266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6648044503940819,0.0,0.0,0.6076449573677407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,faroutsunrise,2020/03/23,"How do I get help right now? Hi all. 

Maybe this is a stupid question but, how do I go about getting services with everything going on right now? I’ve been in a really awful place and I’m very much losing sight of things I thought I had a handle on. I’ve been off meds for a year and my anxiety is so bad that I have a very hard time going to the doctors office to tell them I need help and new meds etc.

Maybe I don’t need an answer here. Maybe I just need to know that help is still out there.",1.8891055045871568,2.634102807339453,3.364116972477067,95.211129587156,75.97247706422019,6.55091743119266,20.04701834862385,6.6274283507984215,-0.08139541284403727,382,7,95,3,8,126,71,109,0.179,0.741,0.08,-0.9031,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,10,3,1,0,7,1,10,1,0,2,1,17,21,7,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,4,2,10,0,12,17,3,17,0,1,1,0,7,8,0,1,6,59,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177012906557833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199179481643635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495449314078243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16294599347741434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13130999272662838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15266794308517204,0.0,0.2491049700720213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088162090301175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29379384136923425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029563355798268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16345442108108107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4403471346424688,0.0,0.3245800283064622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740418206176744,0.32500561174296555,0.0,0.1411093769524746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15264890670933784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636713363886296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359877504345956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24954619879577905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11667985466397225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770244288644336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970658470322375,0.0,0.0,0.11599126158894744,0.08519515592039631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24110429270507655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408700146150788
mentalhealth,gtrain81416,2020/03/23,Mental abuse I don’t or want to offend anyone. I have a feeling that I have been mentally abused for the past 3 years and I think I might have somehow just realized it? I know this might sound stupid but I saw a post on Facebook and it was like causes of mental abuse and how you might be feeling and I started crying and thinking that I sure do feel/have experienced some of those things. Again I don’t want to offend anyone I’m just feeling a little lost,1.980839243498817,4.072604436170213,3.1705673758865287,90.93388888888893,79.1063829787234,5.454373522458629,21.08274231678487,6.42735559955562,0.2596089834515363,363,10,75,3,9,117,58,94,0.242,0.62,0.138,-0.9226,0,0,0,0,3,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,5,6,3,0,4,0,12,0,0,2,1,26,24,8,0,2,4,0,3,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,4,6,11,2,6,16,1,7,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,6,5,53,18,0,0.0,0.502402030041105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19765944478265945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14519732950484893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525772230946713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28586736530394297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767795295105934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905263833593996,0.14166197301321365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429166066513667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4273189500208238,0.4498250766920001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492708184753074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536671561704747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004270605491404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321331005201828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390144849508177,0.18113269384046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673453223893928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101971488344626
mentalhealth,Limminy_Snickshit,2020/03/23,"What are some reasons your mental illness hinders your life? I have ptsd, paranoid ocd, and depression/anxiety combo so I often can’t tell if someone wants to be my friend or lover, or if they want to harm or take advantage. It’s difficult and lonely.",4.195,6.232968500000003,5.069166666666664,80.0925,72.33333333333334,8.133333333333335,30.75,8.841846274778883,2.7913999999999994,200,9,35,4,4,65,41,48,0.23,0.591,0.179,-0.4404,0,2,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,1,1,2,6,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,0,12,7,8,0,4,5,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,6,3,2,6,1,0,0,1,0,1,6,0,0,7,0,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614868489339715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640847237541015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24143340564600804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3444682146577401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3995623881847125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514418211972284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28961797550864715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570016619646497,0.0,0.2987605872044249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4032216215031555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,izzy3535,2020/03/23,Lonely schizophrenic Hey mid 30’s schizophrenic male just looking to chat the quarantine is getting to me,10.858333333333334,11.628054833333335,9.130000000000004,61.665000000000006,56.22222222222222,13.866666666666667,45.77777777777778,13.023866798666859,6.7823777777777785,89,5,12,3,1,27,16,18,0.135,0.865,0.0,-0.3612,0,3,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,1,0,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.528264544704384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8490798377115486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pospy,2020/03/23,"Fears that I’m neglecting my mental health maybe?; Mom w/ depression talks about how I’m just like her before she got help. This has been something I’ve wanted to speak about with my therapist for a few weeks now, but, I’m unsure of when I’ll visit them again/If I’ll get to speak to them again. 


Recently I finally began getting treatment for my ADHD after being untreated for 8 years. I’ve been visiting my psychiatrist a few times every month to update her on how I’m reacting to my prescription. 
-
At my most recent visit, the topic of whether I had depression was brought up. I said that I wasn’t sure but I had suspicions, but I also thought maybe I wasn’t “depressed” enough to be depressed? If that makes sense? I have tons of days where I’m feeling helpless and uncontrollably sad, but, I imagine that’s more related to ADHD. (apparently its relatively normal in the community to be extremely emotionally sensitive/susceptible to intense mood swings) However, Mom chimed in saying that at home, she notices that often I eerily reflect how she used to be before she sought treatment for her depression. 
-
I tried to brush it off at the time by suggesting that it may just be teen moodiness (16, going to be 17 in on the 28th), but, knowing what I know about depression based off mom and personal research, I’m a little afraid now that I think about it? Especially since my older brother had depression too.


I’ve been feeling like I’m slowly starting to loose a bit of myself? Like, my spark almost. I’m even less motivated to do things or try new things than I already was. (Usually I would chalk this up to adhd and my difficulty doing work that doesn’t pertain to my special interest, but, I’m beginning to loose interest in those interest too! I’m even feeling less motivated to talk to most of my friends since I just don’t feel interested in doing so. When we text I often just phone-in most of my reactions. I feel dirty and kind of deceptive that I’m faking emotions because I don’t want to be mean. 
-
Mom started to get on my case because my apatite has become god awful lately. Some days I’ll just eat an orange and be okay for the whole day. Today I haven’t eaten at all actually because I just don’t feel hungry (mom ended being especially upset that I didn’t eat breakfast). 
She used to jokingly ask if I was in love or something when I first started having apatite issues in 2019, but as it went on shes getting kind of concerned by how little I eat.


The psychiatrist gave me the option to try taking medication for the depression (I can’t remember the exact name currently) to see how it’d work for me, but I declined since I’m undiagnosed. 
I’m not really sure what to do from here since on one hand, I feel like maybe it’s the same situation as my ADHD diagnoses where I sorta neglected it at the time (as directed by my father) thinking it wasn’t affecting me in any meaningful way. 
Obviously that wasn’t true and all it did was make my academic (and often at-home life) more difficult for no reason, making me grow up thinking that I was just a bad kid and a bad student, and now I know that I’m not just a weird person with weird feelings; there are entire communities of people who are just like me.


I feel like because I’m not an “extreme case” or anything, I should just stay quiet about this. I feel kind of embarrassed asking my therapist to get screened for any more issues almost? I know this obviously won’t happen, but I feel like I’d be making a fool out of myself asking to get screened for depression. (I’ve also considered asking about the possibility that I may be on the autism spectrum, same story tho, where I feel I have a few notable telltale traits but I don’t think it’s severe enough to justify me asking.)  
I kinda think that may be self-destructive and neglectful of my mental health? I’m unsure. 

I would greatly appreciate any guidance on the subject, thank you for your time.",6.041715322260642,6.3121045215123885,7.082056856187293,73.98581528824899,66.36636245110822,10.320151918825463,32.58004081401281,10.176274734539398,3.2819134629556146,3116,122,577,70,46,1051,320,767,0.155,0.722,0.12300000000000001,-0.9894,3,0,2,0,0,0,84.0,1,2,2,5,44,52,0,5,25,2,56,12,1,16,8,121,131,41,0,8,29,7,13,7,1,7,5,5,1,3,37,14,5,3,30,1,0,7,17,27,0,2,25,22,83,24,94,86,21,75,0,14,3,1,45,31,0,20,42,383,120,8,0.0,0.0,0.048129853251105546,0.0,0.23709541359015865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877504082695247,0.0,0.054426578909434746,0.07888343400030731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061922792967228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040586703892225184,0.0,0.2305408141374253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236138824980263,0.12026167543253027,0.054470798209454316,0.0839365044644731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05384539090012485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542324381050016,0.0,0.3823183389361959,0.05005943553771591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15140205587077496,0.0,0.11095821672939572,0.04368346895423867,0.10192285984383016,0.0,0.06515166653553475,0.0,0.04155478641148642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05549945870528991,0.2992561142847841,0.1409387682164866,0.0,0.05402837638825432,0.0,0.04195213140978847,0.0,0.0,0.03810502248577576,0.0,0.15460806711619715,0.0,0.028030069817303452,0.0,0.03944624034759936,0.05437620592690304,0.0,0.0,0.0436141000904158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485111850483812,0.0,0.0,0.03305860129202757,0.0,0.04947264712537828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295591813643196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407964495387325,0.10842138785127317,0.0,0.05563585699277651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034836643408139106,0.16866909525551474,0.09886452420752656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044513824662354005,0.0,0.13168770419866788,0.0,0.1486477077230855,0.053724661696766166,0.0,0.049685379954242576,0.09940725747840123,0.0,0.0,0.2888188265967597,0.039367283276979866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04763420440841259,0.0,0.0,0.048323778729027766,0.0,0.05615190260064861,0.0,0.0,0.03342095820135396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0341927382094424,0.08612980243968875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05560163783808228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03159608014071805,0.0507098567035322,0.09739641077312904,0.0,0.0558706975659391,0.0,0.04691524556642373,0.03922177141873283,0.0,0.0,0.03930218345916688,0.0,0.051452208752260115,0.05571831149461924,0.0,0.16319425095460374,0.055438492535588364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593891312405487,0.0,0.0,0.10472825901164687,0.05256926525882539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296828383982804,0.0,0.037083001124909344,0.07928416261429726,0.0,0.04540784076196416,0.0,0.11453018406041893,0.06553291494110344,0.1580134493229025,0.0,0.03915509786410891,0.11503710268908734,0.0,0.04675022234289936,0.0,0.0,0.10045647962528212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519443593466716,0.05431974317499813,0.0,0.05818121069522891,0.0391484472150256,0.03956206150207325,0.0,0.0,0.045720749440099726,0.0,0.0550647597600401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181206126593903,0.0,0.0,0.07007196893064213,0.0,0.0,0.03176089042829188
mentalhealth,bigjor08,2020/03/23,i need someone to talk to my sisters boyfriend was killed in a drug deal gone wrong 3 4 weeks ago and now i'm sick. i haven't been able to talk with a professional yet and i don't really have friends my family has all been quietly dealing with it and i don't think they understand how badly the anxiety has been for me so right now i guess i'm just looking for a friend.,2.545916666666667,3.588602425000005,4.065000000000001,89.66666666666669,74.75,8.333333333333334,25.833333333333336,8.841846274778883,1.6064583333333338,294,10,69,6,6,98,55,80,0.23199999999999998,0.728,0.04,-0.9356,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,6,5,1,0,4,0,10,2,0,1,1,12,18,5,1,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,5,2,9,2,8,13,1,8,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,1,5,42,10,1,0.20668798398822155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832164269662188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811574202109938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17257583326730622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4261724717058702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396924423343537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19484703654458735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193732474351753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276901165723824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22866963091044926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735658508511573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532565211933307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13240961509116062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17651040900198328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512605810536055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33225594465609903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13243731444464332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151694805749932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16579263352834675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22598086406781626,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dandrambus,2020/03/23,"Depersonalization/derealization fading, will it ever go away fully? Hello, I'm a 25 year old male and I weight roughly 195 lbs. 
When this all started I had just turned 25 and weighed roughly 205.

These details will hopefully help with opinions on the following info.


After having a horrible flu around Christmas, during which i had a fever for about 4 or 5 days and lost about 20 lbs in 8 days, I started having very intense, uncontrollable anxiety all day long accompanied by depersonalization/derealization and occasional panic attacks. In early January I went to my doctor and I was prescribed 50mg Sertraline (Zoloft) and 50mg Propranolol (for heart regulation and panic attacks) and, at first, it didn't change anything. But I soon began to regulate and the distressing thoughts of unreality became more and more scarce. Now, after about 3 months of taking meds, my anxiety has diminished to an average of only a few cumulative minutes/hrs per week and I only really dissociate when I'm having an episode of high anxiety. I'm much more confident, healthy and have a new job and feel very good, better than I have in years. My main question is if anyone has experienced similarities and whether or not the thoughts of unreality became either totally acceptable or completely dissipated all together. From the research I've done, it was likely brought on by a combination of extreme illness and poor habits/health in regard to gaming all day while smoking weed and cigarettes. I've taken steps to replace bad habits with good ones. I exercise instead of play xbox. I study and read instead of getting high. And, I currently use a pod-fed nicotine device (not Juul) instead of smoking cigarettes with a plan to quit soon. It's like once or twice a week now whereas, at first, I was in a state of unreality, confusion and fear from eye open to eye shut. That lasted a few weeks. I know that everyone is different and my experience will certainly be different from others. But if there is any reassurance anyone has of this possibly totally going away or at least becoming rather acceptable or even ""normal""....at least not so distressing eventually, that would just be awesome.


Any opinions, help, advice, tips or tricks to maybe forget this or deal with it or anything would just be greatly appreciated!

Thanks for reading and have a great day! :)",8.192607655502393,8.973351112440191,8.602570334928231,63.166592344497616,61.79904306220096,11.855464114832534,38.72956937799043,11.525088041916213,4.959387827751195,1887,92,296,54,25,626,234,418,0.113,0.754,0.133,0.9042,4,0,2,0,0,0,60.0,0,0,0,6,21,26,3,7,18,0,27,11,3,1,8,73,50,39,0,6,22,0,4,2,0,5,6,0,0,1,14,27,2,0,8,6,1,6,4,12,0,4,14,7,18,14,50,28,16,57,0,1,2,0,8,17,0,16,35,203,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817497578544431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272353122645667,0.0,0.20708477496945102,0.0,0.0,0.1261864990857873,0.0,0.1485087013183367,0.08032680341484262,0.0,0.2053069021185932,0.16955438695763506,0.0,0.0753410700720671,0.0,0.09965563504910348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980405672970331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545490948633956,0.0,0.094607940506628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909651982644131,0.09302661168045707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18854927077871186,0.0,0.09235764727515376,0.0,0.09234003543760623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959827023407944,0.08162122222584269,0.0,0.08622182348797637,0.0,0.08826552119958757,0.0,0.10153759415989597,0.045624688046461435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350486626723486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04714319604464323,0.0,0.10256337340139253,0.15136688944476515,0.0,0.19896515238749726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959138212003918,0.0,0.10692694267052424,0.12096301188479035,0.19067295628808376,0.0,0.08962206680831097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954266698012152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04958988400388645,0.07355221559940511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816690438274184,0.0,0.0,0.07985366665682868,0.0,0.0,0.0985003500281709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065151848136777,0.0,0.10022889938387848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202339132317775,0.0,0.06633188747591423,0.0,0.0,0.08714792230739214,0.0,0.0,0.08840951510745015,0.0,0.0,0.0946847117264156,0.0960955624844909,0.061144446620710474,0.13725304268301922,0.0,0.21173876588326102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172453334018912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108199196675144,0.09597426441313826,0.18051551737656465,0.0,0.05780578833043627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773524533592734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784424220146709,0.0,0.0,0.08307473648434051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327038601686234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814796305230304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793263450145124,0.0,0.14890391143685275,0.0,0.0,0.2171392283080127,0.10987989943927236,0.0,0.08364721043473257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281983520063813,0.0,0.0,0.116214625428678
mentalhealth,ATLtoATX,2020/03/23,"What is the Correct CBD Dosage for Anxiety? The amount of people that experience anxiety has increased dramatically in recent years. Many are turning to consuming CBD as the answer to all of their problems, including stress relief. But, do they know the right CBD [dosage](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) for anxiety?

## Anxiety Review

Before we start discussing the proper CBD [dosage](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) for anxiety, let’s do a quick review of exactly what anxiety involves.

Contrary to popular belief, having an anxiety disorder is not the same thing as simply being stressed about something. Anxiety disorders are something that people struggle with on a daily basis and it is not just temporary stress about some important activity or event coming up.

We all know this nervous feeling – our hearts beat a little faster, our stomachs start to get unsettled, we start to breathe a little faster, and we may even start to sweat a little more. This is a completely normal emotion and feeling to have – especially when we have a big event coming up. Maybe we have a job interview or are giving a big presentation, or maybe we have to have a conversation with someone that we have been dreading. Either way, being stressed or anxious about those kinds of things is a normal part of life.

However, when we start to feel this way every day or start to have frequent panic attacks – that is more serious. This is when we step into the territory of having an anxiety disorder.  Anxiety disorders can be due to a variety of causes such as environment, genetics, personality, and even certain medical conditions.  Anxiety disorders are actually considered one of the most common mental illnesses in the United States. And, although support of mental health has been increased in recent years, it still has a long way to go.

A good majority of people still do not share about their anxiety and depression because there is still a stigma around these topics. Additionally, traditional anti-anxiety medications have several unpleasant side effects that deter patients from taking them. Side effects can include drowsiness, nausea, dry mouth, trouble sleeping, agitation, and sexual dysfunction. As you can see, these can seriously affect a person’s day to day activities and quality of life.

Therefore, CBD could be a way to offer some reduced anxiety for these patients. It may allow them to decrease their [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) of these medications and potentially even get off of them for good!

## CBD Review

So, let’s talk about how cannabidiol (CBD) could help with anxiety.

***First, what is CBD?***

CBD is a phytocannabinoid (aka a chemical compound) from cannabis plants, which means it can come from either industrial hemp or medical marijuana plants. The health benefits of CBD have taken the world by storm and seem to be constantly expanding as more people start to utilize their CBD products.

***Second, how does CBD work?***

It is thought that CBD works by enhancing the endocannabinoid system (ECS) and restoring balance (also known as homeostasis). It binds to cannabinoid receptors to produce its effects. Many CBD users prefer to use full spectrum CBD products because they contain other cannabinoids in addition to CBD, which are thought to create a synergy and enhance the ECS even more than the effects of CBD alone.

However, more research into the mechanism of action of CBD is showing that it works on other receptors as well. Specifically relating to anxiety, CBD is thought to work through serotonin receptors. This is similar to a medication class that helps treat anxiety known as SSRIs (selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors). These drugs help increase serotonin levels, which is a neurotransmitter (aka a chemical messenger in the brain) that helps elevate mood and decrease anxiety. So, CBD is thought to enhance serotonin as well, which makes sense why many feel it helps them with stress relief.

***Third, what types of CBD are there?***

CBD comes in a wide variety of forms. The most popular CBD form is the CBD oil [tinctures](https://trymfit.com/compare-cbd-oil-tinctures/). However, there are other kinds such as CBD capsules, CBD gummies, topical products such as salves or creams, vaping products, CBD water, and other CBD products.

## What Kinds of Anxiety Does CBD Help With?

Research into CBD and anxiety shows that it may be able to help with several different kinds of anxiety disorders. However, a lot of this is preclinical data. This means there have only been animal studies or small studies in humans and not full on randomized placebo-controlled trials like prescription anxiety medications have to support them.

Although, anxiety is one of the few health benefits of CBD that have been studied in humans so far (even if they are small studies). Most of the other reported uses have only been in cell culture or animals. The preclinical data supports the possible use of CBD with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD), Social Anxiety Disorder (SAD), Panic Disorder (PD), Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), and Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). But again, more research into these areas are needed.

Interestingly enough, some studies show that CBD does not cause anxiety at high doses, which is contrary to other anti-anxiety medications. Also, CBD is thought to counteract the anxiety that can be induced by its cousin compound – THC. Therefore, for those who can legally use THC, whether it be medically or recreationally, might want to consider adding CBD to their mix if they are prone to experience anxiety or paranoia when using THC.

Additionally, many people use CBD just for everyday stress relief to help them feel more relaxed day to day. Even Kim Kardashian is holding a CBD themed baby shower. She claims that the zen-like environment will help stop her from freaking out about all the upcoming responsibilities she will take on as the birth of her child gets closer.

### Important Note

So, it seems that CBD may be an option for a lot of different kinds of anxiety.  Although it should not be a replacement for prescription medications – it should be used WITH these medications to help manage anxiety. Eventually, the CBD alone may be able to help enough to get off of prescription medications, but this should never be your go-to option (unless your physician tells you explicitly).

Also, CBD has the potential to interact with some medications that you may be taking. Please be sure to see a healthcare provider before starting or stopping any medications, supplements, or herbal products – including CBD. They will be able to help you figure out possible drug interactions and tell you how to take it so that you can avoid these problems (such as lower doses or taking in the evening instead of the morning, etc.).

Additionally, always be aware of your allergies or sensitivities. Before starting any new CBD product always check the labeling for all the ingredients to make sure you do not have a problem with any of them. Sometimes, people may be sensitive to certain carrier oils in the CBD oil [tinctures](https://trymfit.com/compare-cbd-oil-tinctures/), so they would want to choose a product with a different carrier oil.

Now that we have been through how CBD can help with anxiety, let’s finally talk about CBD dosing.

## What is the Correct CBD Dosage for Anxiety?

Unfortunately, this answer is not black and white and is more of a gray area.

Since the only true [dosage](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) information around pure CBD relates to Epidiolex, the FDA approved drug containing CBD that treats certain rare forms of childhood epilepsy, there really is not information for other health issues. Additionally, the lack of evidence in humans makes it hard to say for sure what [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) will be effective for anxiety.

However, as with anything new you are starting, the best advice is to “start low and go slow”. This means to start at the lowest [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) possible and gradually increase the [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) (maybe once a week or so) until you start to notice the anti-anxiety effect you want. This means you will need to do some trial and error before you find the perfect CBD [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) for your anxiety.

Additionally, doses will vary from person to person. So, the CBD [dosage](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) for anxiety that your friend is taking may be different than the [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) you need. This is because [dosage](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) depends on a lot of factors – such as age, weight, height, kidney function, liver function, genetics, other drugs you are taking, and others. Fascinatingly, research is showing that older adults might need higher doses of CBD than younger people because as we age our natural endocannabinoids decrease. So, we need higher doses to help restore them back to normal.

## What Does the Research Say?

The CBD [dosage](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) for anxiety in the studies varies greatly.

The studies vary from as low as 15 mg to 60 mg, all the way up to 300 mg to 600 mg. Reviews of these studies suggest that the lower doses were not as effective as the higher doses were. However, many of these studies were looking at actual anxiety disorders and not just everyday stress, so perhaps these disorders require higher doses than if you are just looking to take the edge off.

Additionally, research studies generally try to start a higher [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) because they are looking into creating possible drug products, which typically tend to have higher doses than over the counter drugs and supplements.

However, reading people’s comments online about CBD dosing for anxiety suggest that lower doses may do the trick. Some say that taking 5 mg twice a day (for a total of 10 mg per day) helped with their anxiety. Others say 25 mg daily helps for anxiety.

As you can see, the wide [dosage](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) range can be extremely confusing for CBD consumers. This is because your proper [dosage](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) is really individual and personalized to you.

So, the best advice we can give you is to start with a low [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) and just keep slowly increasing it until you get the anxiety and stress relief you are seeking. Just use the [dosage](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) ranges you have researched as guidance for what range you should be shooting for when increasing your [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage). Then, eventually, it will become personalized to you.

## Future of CBD and Anxiety

Although this is reaching a bit – CBD could decrease the number of people that are not seeking treatment for their anxiety disorders.

Think about it. Currently, CBD is available online and over the counter at various pharmacies, supplement stores, or organic stores. Those with anxiety disorders also feel there is a stigma around going to the pharmacy and picking up their “anxiety medication”. This leads some patients to just stop getting their medications altogether and not getting the treatment they need.

Therefore, if they eventually can decrease their [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) enough and get off their anxiety medications and just take CBD (again with physician approval), they would not feel judged for picking up their medications. This is because CBD is not only used for anxiety – but for other benefits as well such as [pain](https://trymfit.com/cbd-oil-for-pain/), inflammation, acne, and much more. So, no one could really guess the reason a person is taking CBD oil.

Additionally, for those patients that do not seek any treatment at all – CBD could offer them at least some anxiety relief even if it is not the same as the prescription medications. This is a better option than them not seeking any treatment and suffering the consequences of anxiety – such as depression and suicidal ideation, high blood pressure, and heart problems.

### Take Away Points

Overall, CBD dosing is going to vary from person to person. The amount of CBD you need depends on a variety of factors including age, weight, genetics, and other factors. Always talk with a healthcare professional before starting any new CBD products.

So, if you are patient with the trial and error process and follow the popular advice of “start low and go slow”, you will eventually find the right [dose](https://trymfit.com/cbd/dosage) that allows you to experience the anti-anxiety benefits of CBD.

Start your CBD journey today and you may find yourself on the path to serenity.",9.840106191444043,11.372212948334141,8.641804992532537,61.69955550814311,58.3384838242395,12.080807309504829,39.762617018329905,11.738718161319404,5.412889478550223,10220,491,1399,293,129,3154,623,2071,0.107,0.807,0.086,-0.9104,18,3,8,1,0,0,531.0,17,36,32,22,79,81,2,18,120,0,167,60,11,39,21,325,274,132,1,36,57,1,10,1,1,26,46,7,1,14,110,99,3,9,43,6,3,22,20,36,3,7,15,32,89,44,268,203,61,185,1,8,10,0,150,77,0,60,79,976,199,27,0.04985760289690927,0.0,0.032435885587801,0.0,0.0,0.0487202725206483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0344249602232611,0.0,0.05316147603147007,0.041485519619522813,0.0,0.0,0.06780975931990307,0.0,0.6611094489978396,0.018774966623687075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01367618634702501,0.044383837003896434,0.0,0.018906740324161845,0.015614286377857438,0.012779139700520388,0.0,0.07091637458363864,0.018354601762238614,0.07070857979883463,0.0,0.03488165218043298,0.01469833270906421,0.01814386311916246,0.0,0.0,0.01855252457740403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034144994722613925,0.0,0.057263880269097976,0.01742491601893959,0.017959452164544924,0.018639847042302732,0.06634539827185136,0.0,0.0,0.07502606825450167,0.0,0.02862818687869785,0.0,0.0,0.06945411116990086,0.2857056619000156,0.0,0.05817429903938962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156379812382083,0.0,0.0,0.018694364203045,0.0,0.051516231569852335,0.018534802164059616,0.08781460398708474,0.0,0.014002393593808856,0.0,0.0,0.04877030255709865,0.0,0.0,0.058822171515397065,0.0,0.0,0.018205522317729195,0.0455689458011412,0.01413628385144759,0.0,0.0,0.012839953440340236,0.0,0.06946277257856709,0.03188530384847798,0.05667044939044635,0.027878794554653318,0.0,0.018322727735547585,0.01830792352893261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01488753972146616,0.0,0.0,0.07066173391039321,0.0,0.03938766632522399,0.17823200143271678,0.035118196555288465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017346128004159276,0.016491992573616842,0.014771909424416444,0.0,0.086531701870814,0.018266956442121056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05098277691803421,0.023477266260384176,0.00811930212354387,0.04997041616495145,0.0,0.014707469878832794,0.04186782947524575,0.0,0.0,0.04238715105820042,0.0,0.0,0.033280337084318275,0.08424630646209562,0.05008866342724755,0.07241272774915823,0.0,0.3013577377966956,0.033496491391155805,0.03526069182797841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.012217024939514263,0.08626048854422022,0.01281775232593974,0.048152783560223296,0.0,0.0,0.04884986506754888,0.0,0.01892107045069941,0.0,0.017698906636358997,0.033784802047850504,0.05055860489697458,0.03536800313645632,0.03899810305257892,0.0,0.017996975116472892,0.0,0.1036949525731898,0.13060120725656527,0.0,0.01824289200788417,0.01571051671300273,0.07494260803169839,0.015916600553618685,0.0,0.0,0.0636093234079913,0.019426956576177882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.016623698357442342,0.0,0.03194005709264596,0.01708730651668642,0.03281891199644491,0.0,0.0,0.028385413637764336,0.0,0.052865022615030684,0.0,0.0,0.039730054423229084,0.030258992771158462,0.0,0.03754993324737415,0.0,0.013747574776858536,0.0,0.016631203153817782,0.01694118247913803,0.01408139504683816,0.02558854568808835,0.01643681470688276,0.0,0.21173680767663708,0.0,0.039816346077162924,0.04168318849749146,0.17133514700145935,0.017373997264672553,0.0,0.018178708450939083,0.05657781692808756,0.04699020068984322,0.0,0.14994685009294845,0.04007365263610405,0.029051828329800907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022082117310589348,0.010648912924856523,0.0,0.06596894591976629,0.0,0.0,0.01575305928326002,0.0,0.0,0.01128334654266465,0.018076918326919426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918288292140015,0.0,0.0,0.029407305954545587,0.06595774083195803,0.013330920559884716,0.040475419074675084,0.044827972661718916,0.0,0.014996243920136276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04839590494684606,0.0,0.0,0.023611607075636025,0.0,0.0,0.021404441079925705
mentalhealth,throwaway83477542344,2020/03/23,"what is this/help 
idk if i should flair this but it might be nasty so just to warn you


i can’t stop biting things on my body, i bite my nails, i bite my lip, i bite the inside of my mouth like my cheek, i bite my fingers, i bite skin, i bite hair off my arms and my legs, i even bite like blisters on my hands i also pick at things and i can’t stop it no matter what i do i want to stop but i can’t, i want to tell somebody but i’m to scared to tel anyone because i’ll get embarasssed and i’ll get anxious and a bunch of other things i’m using a throwaway and i made a random email adress because i don’t want people to know who i am because i think that somebody will find my real accounts or somebody u know will find me or somebody will track me i don’t know what this is or how to stop it can somebody please help me",1.3180184331797236,2.077493397849466,2.9140092165898617,97.83387096774193,77.38709677419354,5.314285714285715,20.812596006144396,3.1291,-0.5254565284178185,636,14,162,0,14,210,90,186,0.157,0.741,0.102,-0.8989,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,4,0,16,10,10,4,0,35,29,15,0,5,8,0,4,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,14,5,0,4,6,0,1,0,6,1,0,0,1,4,34,2,13,22,1,8,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,6,6,100,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120260939688747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17121984685175173,0.0,0.10597439149535072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771690100257446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834917680431316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010405975267153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770464905975222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15836786186074006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031751680379152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24988050954947866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14808928228744578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14340989293534667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607813844807691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507273538301926,0.0,0.0,0.16636754878606347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17250864880254366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15173816530441026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.506844338271078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324702647171747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020695178742498,0.09711363416386776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089932090605225,0.0,0.0,0.268182336766844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayaccount4711,2020/03/23,"I think I am suffering from OCD and I don't know how to keep going Hi reddit,

My mental health was never really good. I have been struggeling with anxiety and depressive episodes, thoughts of suicide and selfharm for a few years now, and currently I am right into the process of getting diagnosed, getting therapy etc 

About a year ago, the thought of being sexually attracted to kids popped up into my brain. Like, I would never even touch a child, I am not even sexually attracted to them as far as I can tell, but my brain keeps telling me that I am, or at least there's this horrible ""what if"". I feel like a monster, those thoughts are consuming me. I instantly feel ashamed when I see a child because I want to figure out if I am attracted or not and stare at them, and my brain tells me that this is proof that this is proof that I am a pedophile. Its like torture, and not even self harm works as a coping mechanism. If I hadn't read about POCD being a thing I think I would have already killed myself, and I am still struggling with keeping going. At this point I just wish I was dead

I talked to my therapist about this, but I was not specifically since I am too ashamed, and he wasn't a big help. He thinks that my brain wants to tell me something with intrusive thoughts (I told him I was thinking about harming someone without wanting it, which I also do but not in that certain extend). 

I don't know how to continue my life at this point.

Please don't think I am a monster. I would never harm a child. I would rather take my own life.",4.819448051948051,5.434629970779227,5.2043116883116864,85.17932467532471,69.09740259740259,8.757402597402598,30.984415584415583,8.841846274778883,2.2916007792207798,1213,48,253,20,20,386,154,308,0.171,0.732,0.09699999999999999,-0.9813,1,0,1,0,0,1,33.0,0,0,2,1,17,18,2,3,13,0,32,8,4,2,6,64,59,24,3,12,16,0,3,3,0,4,4,0,0,5,18,15,0,3,14,1,0,2,14,10,0,0,12,5,47,8,32,41,4,27,0,2,2,0,18,14,0,5,14,184,65,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968824395021422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920354695125544,0.07189057814516805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877093954500964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054800361350378544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4014190176758742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742813253488927,0.0912435369487882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025888992185013,0.1781283117444866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909092229653094,0.06422241664904943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393491778300844,0.0,0.10218104473532527,0.0754013171996183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555628027617276,0.0,0.0,0.06025604715801808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397136847443523,0.0994576831004194,0.0,0.09881005251240918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699378352308655,0.13175736282069933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059500644862906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080022664580404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867988260599032,0.16996339662028895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992130204360413,0.0,0.0575903039015374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677152515857961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163624979196419,0.0,0.09378215035697976,0.0,0.0,0.07436370639650654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761694148904697,0.06920708305095752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179184007659646,0.0,0.0,0.09397983662534053,0.0,0.09833269939283316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759133711692278,0.07225578298321983,0.3142956728390605,0.0,0.1028050251062188,0.10437731637220496,0.05972355542528353,0.2880117573606499,0.0,0.28547262511624005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590041172404161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15907069438874374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337708429140577,0.08665747557729389,0.0,0.06544606820976473,0.0,0.0,0.25544092607198066,0.0,0.0,0.1157814085672965
mentalhealth,vMoopy,2020/03/23,"I dont know anymore I'm 13 years old an feel like I've been through a civil war. At age 11, i had depression. I missed 7 months of school. I was on the edge of ending my life. I overcame it, but now I have extremely severe social anxiety to the point where going out to the front of my house to get the mail is scary. I haven't been out of my house for months. Any situation that involves people I dont know I will completely avoid. I do online school because of my anxiety. In 7th grade I missed the whole year of school due to anxiety and everyday i felt empty. Today, Im in a situation where my anxiety and social awkwardness is impacting my mental and pyhsical health and it is the hardest thing ive ever faced. It sucks because, i know that im loved and that other people deal with this but i still feel alone.",1.6879363905325455,3.664924757396452,3.6808542899408287,87.48566013313612,79.53254437869822,7.301923076923077,22.396819526627226,8.278499904357787,1.2829434911242603,640,20,136,13,16,217,97,169,0.231,0.728,0.040999999999999995,-0.9822,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,5,9,2,2,9,0,14,4,1,0,1,18,27,7,1,0,2,0,3,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,8,0,1,6,0,0,2,3,7,0,0,5,3,21,2,19,21,1,24,0,3,0,1,6,9,1,0,14,84,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049319112236315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911521404531749,0.0,0.3559992368429625,0.0,0.11537805435103428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14183961240405218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198031443141755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994146878693085,0.1002035026530205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726993118023949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304274046821826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523622328178037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11765003579911587,0.08311334506455581,0.11170467924878484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06078286712545732,0.0,0.06611872359578674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366401811191427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684815631875888,0.0,0.0,0.2513344061641814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918123239239464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217440810960218,0.056837865095996525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500142483500388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11724339296101548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857230137971932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207929742881532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613110649662099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997893857560964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35322698301661337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314311259639626,0.0,0.0,0.2615421501565338,0.0,0.2371880315978748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290930314429216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729115049763832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102767509777506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129889495608568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14983833783303238
mentalhealth,InfernalArtist,2020/03/23,"Is sadness is required symptom of depression? At the end of last year I was in a pretty bad place mentally and had almost all of the signs of depression, but I didnt do anything about it really since I never felt sad. It was more like being apathetic, to basically everything. I just thought it was stress and being un-motivated. Since then it's been mostly better but the virus really isn't helping. I'm not even afraid of the virus, it's just it's ability to, for lack of a better description, f*** up my ability to graduate (need co-ops to graduate, companies that are closed rn aren't exactly hiring), and I've started to notice I'm feeling like I was late last year again. I'm just not sure if it could be depression or not since I'm not sad.",3.233785871964681,4.783201821192058,5.337367549668873,79.20861203090506,73.83443708609272,9.53664459161148,27.81512141280353,9.928628108626363,2.8492644591611485,589,23,117,17,12,205,89,151,0.16899999999999998,0.647,0.184,0.5428,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,6,14,0,2,6,0,17,1,0,0,4,29,26,8,0,4,11,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,9,2,6,5,16,13,4,15,0,6,0,0,1,5,0,4,12,75,14,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15577048625084408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801231055296752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988578277019114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751596802821961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12420169646465876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4019498114781235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13777964844472446,0.0,0.0,0.10274566015186948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980695354560288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865561658325194,0.11113182172781533,0.14936162767599578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426833246373657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25360370083600764,0.1754780240876891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199714284948473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15676750629140862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534548518737026,0.11997716685808035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17710565541221931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625266909695871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826005555211414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19931094843130884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3860415689790996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101058978318818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17819301611048788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466130983940319,0.1616860051558869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12349696000990885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003505867212892
mentalhealth,lampjpn,2020/03/24,"NoFap Day 215, etc I hit 215 days. Everything is doing great, my energy is good and I'm in full control of my life. Things about me is that I meditate everyday, I'm vegan as well which helps with me mentally and physically. The setback is that I deal with mental issues, when I was younger, around 11 years old, I believe I had a very intense concussion, falling 6 feet to the ground very hard, which I didn't get knocked out but I believe it had very bad effects after, my vision altered a bit, greyish a lil and I started having panic attacks and delusions, they got worse overtime, I have bad anxiety but it got better as the years went. I never got my concussion checked out, which was stupid of me, and it cost me a lot. I believe I deal a minor case of schizophrenia, it only comes out when I think and do certain types of things. I have delusions, if I do this bad things will happen to me. I have this voice in my head that controls everything I do, but I try my hardest to deal with it. It tells me to hold back and basically worsens me as a person which hinders my potential, it makes me not take care of myself or else it will tell me bad things will happen to me, its bad. Any advice for anyone who goes through this? I don't wan't to break my streak because of that. Thanks.",3.986143286143289,4.890468826254825,4.919736164736168,85.4186947661948,71.16216216216216,7.763277563277564,28.674603174603178,7.984000788550335,1.7540654654654655,1002,37,206,13,18,327,139,259,0.196,0.721,0.083,-0.9905,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,1,4,6,15,2,1,9,0,21,3,2,4,2,30,38,17,0,1,6,0,1,0,0,3,1,1,0,1,25,15,0,3,2,0,2,3,4,8,1,0,9,2,40,7,28,25,4,24,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,3,12,144,65,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420751439000784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555986395812274,0.0,0.07375086390858819,0.0,0.0,0.06740980829626386,0.0,0.0,0.08582240506672555,0.0,0.10967654237166308,0.0,0.074130803766654,0.4024778504189008,0.05876863132643506,0.0,0.0,0.32585202196971313,0.0,0.08526389438471046,0.1052511505450474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982930588655655,0.0,0.0,0.083045838190751,0.0,0.0,0.21625663005736154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434869579861516,0.2981732327275684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053542970801575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751895779194792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732882566099087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05036852327097362,0.0,0.0,0.08086136848076357,0.2313157418967689,0.1062887303891353,0.0,0.0,0.17050425812741105,0.0,0.08636146967039836,0.0,0.09894109059952708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461938084635252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062355067103852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680949054049059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819615313435385,0.0,0.0,0.06435222285438699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943105630254648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435479262857722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116261743224132,0.0,0.0,0.07332164187431163,0.0,0.11311249397112208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417861446868846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823716057703777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724858426842797,0.0,0.1685274154168055,0.08875833946173373,0.0,0.0,0.25619331871563666,0.06177352254225521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654538230262375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386368794738831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668120396522706,0.08936997952671878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982466665991867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12416551181189965
mentalhealth,21glowing-eyes,2020/03/24,"for information about mental health go to my google classroom:) the code is zquvdgb and I post stuff about coping skills, meds, disorders, etc. NO TRIGGERING CONTENT ON IT",4.445689655172412,7.895419000000004,3.5133620689655167,82.78659482758623,83.13793103448276,7.037931034482759,27.9396551724138,8.07648339933343,2.5416827586206896,137,6,22,3,4,40,28,29,0.098,0.902,0.0,-0.4466,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,14,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3933982095884348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3828183490270814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19507885474260864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648623826077415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3812772192544458,0.0,0.3459187591823077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3287419359606085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3929430953651543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayexplain08,2020/03/24,"Panicking when confronted with intimate feelings I'll try to explain I best I can, but honestly just don't understand it. 

I'm okay with he idea of romance. I do want relationship, sure.  I do like flirting with people, getting to know them etc. But it's all kinds detached. I may like them, but it's not romantic. May turn sexual  but not romantic. I don't feel it.

I ended up relationship 3 years ago. Took me almost 2 years to get over the fallout. I know it may sound stupid, but I really took this hard, even tho I was the one to finish things. If what I was feeling was love, then they were the only person I ever romantically felt it to. 

After breakup, apart from being in massive pain, I also felt relived. I felt like myself again. Comfortable in my own presence. 

Down the road, I met someone else. We were friends, there was some tension but it never turned sexual or romantic. I think they did have some feelings but I have a bit obsessive personality.  I was pushing them away, then pulling back, but never with the intention of anything happening between us. We never addressed it, and I'm not even sure if they know that I did feel something for them. I wasn't in love though, don't be mistaken. I just don't know what I felt. 

The thing is, if we got too close, I was getting anxious, out of control, and had to push them emotionally away to regain balance. I eventually ended up the friendship, because I felt I was too toxic for them. I couldn't stop being that way, and they did not deserve this kind of treatment. 

Recently I had conversation with my ex, just casual chit chat. We have them time to time, but this one was longer and it just felt different. I feel like we didn't stay with the usual what's ups. Abyway, point is, they said something to me, and that took me down the ""what if"" lane. What if they wanted to get back together? (They're no longer with their ex partner). And at that thought I started to panic. I don't want to say that it was panic attack, I'm not a specialist.  But I felt very anxious, my thought process seemed to get messy at once, like I couldn't focus even on one thing, had rapid heartbeat, my hands started to tremble, and generally I just felt so stressed out. It was pure, pure anxiety. I experienced similar thing when dealing with the prospect of addressing feelings with the other girl.


So I wonder, what it is about intimate feelings that makes me go into panic mode? I feel so comfortable by myself, even the thought of hypothetically getting into that situation makes me feel uneasy.",3.4056540104413884,5.494155797959183,4.507247271001424,83.04423113431422,74.6938775510204,7.660180351210253,27.7218794494542,8.499448955792047,2.092526815377314,1991,80,383,38,43,650,220,490,0.132,0.708,0.16,0.9561,1,0,2,0,0,0,77.0,6,0,14,2,27,31,3,7,14,1,42,4,1,4,9,109,100,33,0,10,26,2,20,5,2,3,1,3,2,4,33,26,0,2,31,2,0,7,18,11,0,3,37,24,68,20,54,55,7,56,0,0,0,2,39,22,0,14,30,278,101,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05616871443253847,0.0,0.06345029026694057,0.0,0.0,0.05067248510017116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04847358999370482,0.14316746448978326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052143499438318766,0.0,0.0,0.07208614875943305,0.11906587294354433,0.097446619530924,0.0,0.038626348064745575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649702500118733,0.0,0.06917750989615484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106855881589302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06532591061463522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620230806456619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05293282265102514,0.07127641760550082,0.11224409574759764,0.0,0.07066805187553099,0.16740634550774466,0.057316724441150574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32038942828333605,0.04526753762050072,0.4867180611106698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04895517566196818,0.0,0.1986316918525946,0.0,0.03601144684366893,0.0,0.050678296440890544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603292668471705,0.0,0.05676205335364457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715306910658186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196853664922664,0.1392936610850921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478321769527725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437768375783322,0.0,0.08459245357975602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146611586939996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748101443152661,0.1288120651404416,0.048191478953872456,0.06742418554721724,0.22303340050568932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04392889430866494,0.1106546941348626,0.0,0.0,0.059899836007890964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040592855025761466,0.0,0.06256469734434106,0.1360592970560397,0.0,0.0,0.06027405150557254,0.0503899114688723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057684566900852996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122423668763221,0.0,0.0,0.0536884476479273,0.09756201647577543,0.0,0.0,0.08969929215326111,0.06753801591711632,0.0,0.05297547286099695,0.07258370226529871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944038789294635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16838595824369973,0.040601346824785715,0.062255197980295475,0.15091275918138194,0.07389657848765725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21120052843703396,0.043020265970401546,0.1378445359998038,0.0,0.06596457156782555,0.07621956730567396,0.0,0.0697869308445546,0.052282263284544085,0.11212188855973564,0.05029570868302953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871598521200575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160918790576582
mentalhealth,BackHandTrashCan,2020/03/24,"Tips and Tricks on not feeling depressed during quarantine? So I lost my job, and also can’t leave the house. My sleep schedule has been getting real bad, and everyday I feel too tired/lazy to do anything.

If anyone has advice I would really appreciate it! I have been diagnosed with Depression for a few years now, but this is the first time where I’ve been unemployed and had nothing to occupy my mind with. Thanks!",4.947257383966246,6.662320708860762,5.5272784810126625,78.88602320675106,69.7594936708861,9.317299578059073,28.356540084388186,9.725611199111238,2.7725426160337547,332,12,60,8,6,107,64,79,0.131,0.773,0.096,0.3291,3,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,5,6,1,0,3,0,11,2,1,0,0,14,16,8,0,2,3,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,5,2,7,1,6,10,1,8,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,1,6,43,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21396537734582333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510239615111473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15310206582044722,0.0,0.18018559139747184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18282262449193734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3771802059788124,0.22223999813679948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214257164731334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18624743779465244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439766941955147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526506774300762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21728421650574264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318472408378717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23902092827058516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22108738765435135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21009822127189048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492246488126537,0.14027151357535542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191183345914287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20158913775070209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12767745587154947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554304675344258,0.0,0.0,0.1410031925807197
mentalhealth,Hutch-It,2020/03/24,"Interpersonal communication I was emotionally abused as a child, I had never had an issue with communicating with people until about 4-5 years ago. I spent 17-22 basically avoiding any of my trauma and did nothing to heal myself. I was good at talking to people though. I had a solid group of friends, I worked A LOT and went to school at the same time.  I was described as 'social.' I wrote about my mental health and how I was feeling but I couldn't afford therapy and therefore did not go. I was also extremely bad at being on time to anything (still somewhat true) and once I had an on-campus therapist I very rarely kept appointments because I would forget or double book. Now. In saying this. I am more than frustrated with not being able to communicate or connect with humans well anymore. People say I am doing well but I can just feel it in my body that I'm not. It's physically painful, in the heartache kind of way. I make little eye contact and have a hard time forming sentences when feeling pressured, which apparently is now communicating with anyone but my therapist or strangers. I am strangely good at that though I can see that fading and that is terrifying. 

​

With that slight back story of my basic frustrations, does anyone have any ideas on how I can improve on this? Practice socializing basically? In therapy, we're working through my trauma and I'm trying not to get off that track. I'm also in DBT group. Now with social distancing, I am struggling because I am absolutely ready to practice but don't know-how. I don't want this to affect my job either. My self named 'awkwardness' feels more apparent than ever on our now virtual meetings. Are there virtual meet up groups or something now? I grew up with a large community of people around me. I need people and this is not COVID related but I also feel desperate at this time. Any help is appreciated.",4.454413145539911,6.626118126760566,5.578239436619722,76.14585680751176,71.95774647887325,8.11361502347418,29.016431924882628,8.841846274778883,2.5540403755868537,1505,61,262,30,30,498,192,355,0.12300000000000001,0.7709999999999999,0.106,-0.8847,4,1,1,0,1,0,42.0,1,0,0,2,23,17,2,4,9,0,33,5,2,5,3,60,51,29,0,4,16,0,6,0,1,1,3,2,0,3,14,18,0,2,6,1,1,3,9,10,2,0,15,10,38,7,47,32,8,41,0,0,2,0,20,19,0,6,18,193,52,5,0.09435318318192724,0.11179309332389292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836384039454706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263626195051631,0.0,0.1022316345572746,0.11464944503658367,0.19249020021668053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357300425983874,0.13194787900316884,0.0,0.07764463034649921,0.08399433706840014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255177379248118,0.07878096682181482,0.11503364942623745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480511611257104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825691064373856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061346314884051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534785600973431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23853902206364774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289703527316638,0.0,0.04929564392853401,0.0,0.05362308837224894,0.15827794699309047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452191927711747,0.0,0.0,0.10029302156863072,0.0,0.0,0.0632429498071038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651325910346672,0.0,0.09848020951535097,0.09363097537306084,0.0,0.0,0.09825432082496237,0.051854041927873504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945666770189042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080215702239514,0.0,0.0,0.06298148243841116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950858165418587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996168978455604,0.07277099155913919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09053442398248177,0.0,0.0,0.10048306073397666,0.0,0.0,0.1003984392996131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3270630852232552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15006687665148236,0.0,0.09549045865615044,0.07518727104818862,0.0,0.09843094772338556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28854356423230504,0.0,0.07263769009290807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535057397006246,0.0,0.0,0.098638433334161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583751460657646,0.0,0.0,0.2158021758599704,0.21910263589035184,0.0,0.0,0.1854030468379327,0.0,0.22007239952632565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06405961787492195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785125758981203,0.05565195204738221,0.07489316503063899,0.0,0.0,0.16966968608463895,0.08746634609373855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738048219486226,0.0,0.0,0.06702579420736493,0.0,0.11464944503658367,0.060760356478536025
mentalhealth,purplemessiah,2020/03/24,"Narcissism & Fear I meant to post this on r/narcissism, but it turns out I can't so this is the next most appropriate place I could find. If it doesn't belong here or would go over better in another sub, feel free to redirect me.

Anyway,

I have a hard time admitting this, even anonymously. This is because the person I'm most afraid of admitting it to is myself. 

I have a fairly limited amount of knowledge on narcissism, but the moment I got an idea of their general traits, I began immediately considering that a lot of people in my life could be narcisstic. From family, to friends, and even people I'm surrounded by regularly but hardly interact with. I've always had a background awareness of this being a result of my own insecurities of narcissism, but I've only recently given it enough thought to sink in. 

I wish I felt more empathy. The fear of being a narcissist and lacking empathy has always been a dramatic inner conflict of mine, and I used this fear as a way of giving myself comfort. A narcissist wouldn't be concerned about being a narcissist, right? I've even expressed this logic to others and they've agreed with me. But I realize now that I like the idea of empathy. Empathy is something I've managed to convince myself I'm full of. Deep love and compassion is just another ingridient I've decided to throw into the melting pot of superficial personality traits I've put together to display the me I want the world to see. I've even used the fact that I have a few healthy long-term friendships to curb the possibility of me being a narcissist. But I don't get along with anyone louder than me. The only friendships I have to this day that haven't ended in flames are with people that are lonely and shy enough to listen to me talk about myself endlessly and still appreciate it. My thought process is very one-dimensional. My entire life is dedicated to deciding how I'm going to present myself, and how it may benefit me and charm those around me.

The one thing I've considered from a place of what I think is genuine empathy, comes from an awareness for my lack of it. I can be very temporemental and unpredictable. I've put my girlfriend through hell more times than I'd like to admit, but despite this, I seem too selfish and lazy to make changes to my own personal life. Instead I've decided it'd be in the best interest of me, my family and my friends to isolate myself because of my destructive behavior. Sometimes I question if this is out of a place of care, or a desire to flee the embarassment I've caused myself from acting out or getting caught up in my own bullshit.

These confusing thoughts and conflicting ideas have lead me down a path of enough of enough extensive self-reflection and questioning that I'd feel more relieved with a straight answer at this point. Am I an unempathetic narcissist? Does it seem to perhaps be a different problem?

I just want a better idea of who I am so I can learn to accept and embrace it, rather than riddle myself with delusions to ignore the realities of my situation. Thank you in advance for your answers and I apologize for any poor spelling/grammar mistakes.",7.254487141590303,7.363176825795647,7.8411907577101205,70.11932678096368,63.82412060301508,11.512641639570402,36.654300916346436,11.148518509798206,4.2826443393437765,2523,114,443,67,34,839,277,597,0.11900000000000001,0.703,0.17800000000000002,0.9907,1,2,1,0,0,0,54.0,0,2,1,6,20,31,2,6,37,0,42,4,0,8,1,106,81,33,0,15,15,0,5,2,3,3,3,1,0,3,33,29,0,5,30,0,2,11,5,13,0,1,11,7,59,19,88,55,19,53,1,1,1,1,22,29,1,14,13,322,92,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258042820530632,0.0819085119806749,0.0,0.05140804650435727,0.15853853191473846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05285866001731969,0.0,0.0,0.06729669533183008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216555220909613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933360693617089,0.13371749064249625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770754213956915,0.07765817903777568,0.07997081532616586,0.06511948094386652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071491846307228,0.0,0.0,0.04875333130995126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898199785881868,0.0,0.0,0.06615479321198989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695584481250738,0.31244456312292274,0.0,0.199722456950444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425308448525565,0.2552004156177928,0.07644747706978126,0.0,0.07258426100302916,0.0,0.06909360860132162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681095999071947,0.0,0.07899184746094025,0.07251881732753779,0.08592618900010736,0.0,0.06046123191172194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543879382777185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413558864497771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018761414764146,0.07386502450438133,0.0,0.0,0.06690030783848099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642692336513752,0.068228572671872,0.0,0.05046108801065025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039747606180626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245195925988937,0.11498871863608953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722677672401097,0.1980232050226456,0.23694599357645604,0.0,0.07146289695375496,0.08522342028989986,0.07240031667933172,0.0,0.0,0.07233540766105301,0.0,0.15199023456172653,0.16937021586157172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464218297146112,0.0,0.0,0.06455878972161312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060240428690344024,0.1376399848478579,0.07886338212026966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497335929847273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819769130161235,0.07476663034728558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037126783216845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607614071773184,0.0,0.06959887600762786,0.0,0.0,0.05022279351834776,0.04843902851321826,0.0,0.18004494965504092,0.0881615698080181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222701870581453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13058178683808908,0.0,0.12474965684781718,0.08917726104569239,0.06000478943478114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693196381101849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053701411423412934,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skigurrl,2020/03/24,"I’m doing better in quarantine? I realized today after about 2 weeks of social distancing/my city shut down that my mental health has been so much better than it was before. I’m actually doing things for myself like cooking, cleaning, and exercising and making a good effort to keep in touch with a few close friends. Before this all went down I was having really big panic attacks and bad depression. I was considering in-patient therapy because my brain felt like it was on fire. I think the positive change is due to the fact that a lot of my obligations have been removed, but I’m confused and worried that my day-to-day life was what was giving me so much anxiety and was what felt overwhelming. I thought being alone for long periods of time was going to make this worse, but I’ve become so at ease and comfortable. I know I have to go back to the real world after all this but I want to keep this clarity and level of calm in my head. What should I do to maintain this once social distancing is over and I go back to “real life”?",6.048529411764704,6.15110855882353,6.88901960784314,75.95058823529412,66.35294117647058,10.133333333333336,30.235294117647058,9.928628108626363,2.8279882352941184,822,27,154,17,12,274,118,204,0.12,0.725,0.155,0.7607,0,2,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,6,14,1,3,6,0,21,7,2,2,3,32,39,14,0,2,3,0,4,2,1,1,4,0,1,0,14,10,1,2,6,2,0,5,0,6,0,0,14,4,17,8,27,23,6,28,0,2,0,0,4,13,0,2,12,107,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.12252017561872244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13003351367744875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604657159874376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14283298284694285,0.0,0.19308274301630904,0.10483027758178146,0.07653504321591173,0.13866179329273226,0.21367019787397126,0.0,0.0,0.22208023886904427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015702227344728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328168640082371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16194069169190192,0.0,0.1081373429601328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410983027610433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700079538067932,0.0,0.0,0.120440461432664,0.21406147191247787,0.1053066609088991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885208441902288,0.1334553981082122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231919251292517,0.0,0.0,0.0689998336949972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177361507672329,0.12267626476672402,0.0,0.0,0.11110914715640596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673941526009913,0.0,0.0,0.1676132333197645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652640535268533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18458963139154144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13370827465007648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473076608889017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858102402572683,0.08043152069272272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559679336535153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357910870350482,0.0,0.08341085319231015,0.08044834651856086,0.0,0.09967388517995726,0.07321010283680973,0.0,0.11900816363978382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405354131144788,0.0,0.10070985876029806,0.0,0.0,0.11638751985373967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750366622606313,0.127947728308005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xvreaperxv,2020/03/24,"Corona makes it impossible for me to get meds. Rant. 32 year old male here with gad, panic disorder and ptsd. I take the lowest strength Xanax once a day to help me sleep. I won’t go to the docs for fear of catching this virus. I haven’t slept in 2 weeks since quarantine, and I’m not sure if the doc or the staff hasn’t relayed my refill request. 

Thousands of people are suffering in different ways, and I’m grateful that me and my family are so far not infected. This virus has really cemented the fact that I hate being tied to this bullshit medicine you can’t get and get judged for constantly when you need it filled.

I mean Christ I take .25 a day for 2 years since a life incident and I still have issues gettting it. Does anyone have any advice for shutting my brain off to be able to sleep? I’m getting 2 hours a night at best, which just makes the next day twice as bad because my body is losing it.",3.3438248847926277,4.6064615698924785,4.119385560675884,89.191935483871,73.08602150537635,7.679877112135178,24.57603686635945,8.192908349453996,1.2300811059907844,716,21,155,11,14,229,120,186,0.16899999999999998,0.75,0.081,-0.9483,2,1,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,2,0,3,5,9,1,2,10,0,12,8,5,2,2,18,28,11,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,10,7,0,0,1,0,0,3,6,6,0,2,1,0,16,3,19,24,1,23,1,2,0,0,5,6,0,2,13,85,26,1,0.1363185864512038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320894498808558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270131335033116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953171252116894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382032565559515,0.08309854503727894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430579462920973,0.0,0.0,0.1514192187217753,0.0,0.15217662574285418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473119638886937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26374263271722864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424239089093758,0.15623291016155152,0.0,0.11929331363819168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850903126268742,0.15339630858056816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28488334031434265,0.0,0.07747299414327666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458638199644068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09137147502576423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13424634836627786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14228118757441613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628584903003347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15250562929490394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18198742997470027,0.0,0.0,0.14849090380836938,0.1514192187217753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107850456703056,0.0,0.0,0.14497636319150056,0.12792575891015573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14304342522608252,0.1451748456131565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599404897202395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450614373452043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15934913266824874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732917711754158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22552828677967834,0.0,0.2728340682080949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886419922982804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284786544660554,0.0,0.20498922390779864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820334881705368,0.10934654744077728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556940058831605
mentalhealth,throway420691111,2020/03/24,"I am losing my mind. Hi, I’m a 15 year old boy and I am really desperate right now. Yesterday I accidentally clicked on an sketchy looking ad that led me to a CP imageboard site. I am not sure why but I kept scrolling down and saw the horrors of the world behind the curtains the internet’s safe zone. The girls and boys in that site are even smaller than I am. I lots of toddlers, preteens and even babies get sexually abused. I anonymously reported the site to law enforcement and everything, deleted all my browsing data and even drowned my phone and hammered it. Every time I closed my eyes, I can still see the horrors I’ve witnessed. I can’t forget it like it burned itself into my brain. I didn’t get any sleep last night, I’ve spent most of the night crying and being scared at every little sound I heard. I want to talk to someone but I can’t... because you know what would happen if I talk to someone about this situation. I am so scared of what I saw, even gore and other stuff doesn’t scare me as much as what I have witnessed yesterday. I want to seek help but I don’t know if I should or not.",3.011066666666665,4.541504795555556,4.179222222222227,87.36350000000002,74.37777777777778,7.311111111111113,26.277777777777786,7.984000788550335,1.4603777777777789,869,31,183,13,18,284,135,225,0.195,0.75,0.055,-0.9877,0,0,0,0,1,0,22.0,0,1,0,1,8,7,0,3,11,0,16,3,3,1,2,35,31,18,1,6,8,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,1,3,12,11,0,2,2,0,1,1,7,4,0,0,6,8,30,3,20,22,4,23,0,1,6,0,10,12,0,5,11,117,42,1,0.0,0.16058561303764504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216775946368837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262026107261229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130075433190185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887772157601176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580756831548762,0.0,0.2283864607597153,0.0,0.12180920908641635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162182948840935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119852257935282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084557518825014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489718705133572,0.11047828965869706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621506042563036,0.1358406619809319,0.0,0.0,0.1138144147698971,0.1516278642632728,0.0,0.11522614981282092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368506914314425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09963307588291632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25437893273167744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14222012108151613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682654322612847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574528516317267,0.0,0.0,0.40707949809643607,0.0,0.10800304075064396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234588110597416,0.13563186897401922,0.0,0.2296750163292585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823761785232566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515398997889335,0.0,0.0,0.1277391796629106,0.0,0.0,0.21787417115410684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903095830842223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988291531352528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229834316054568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627945637876306,0.0,0.0,0.08727944458270209
mentalhealth,eggboyandlavagirl,2020/03/24,"Is this healthy? Over the past year I have been feeling a lot more down. For reference, i've been a 3-6 on the mental health scale (I believe the scale one of the the top post on this subreddit). As a coping mechanism i've been looking at upcoming events or activities in my life and looking forward to them to cheer myself up. 
Ever since things started to be cancelled due to COVID-19 i've been pretty paranoid that these future events will be cancelled leaving me crushed and even more sad because of these events being the foundation of me being happy. 

I guess what i'm trying to ask is should I change  this coping mechanism and is it healthy for my mental state.

Thanks in advance",7.5522077922077955,7.040464090909097,7.050649350649352,78.09954545454549,63.39393939393939,9.664069264069264,36.28138528138528,8.841846274778883,3.0619294372294377,548,23,101,7,7,171,83,132,0.086,0.7609999999999999,0.154,0.8627,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,2,2,4,0,0,9,0,14,2,0,0,1,10,22,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,4,3,10,3,19,12,3,22,0,1,2,0,2,10,0,3,10,71,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887968556827286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310741085992755,0.0,0.0,0.2275295388188911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136373033783018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333866828572308,0.18267617567921515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211245680471956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22247171460340032,0.0,0.0,0.2149805174055404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146643921012016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21383687263103546,0.0,0.0,0.14264391237198767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33917583263373524,0.0,0.0,0.1716914565828786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4070380707682003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684717489021872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927850113606907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934131639901725,0.2054566957640349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670558939910807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294190580023874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18592928092312955,0.0,0.0,0.13416722252517127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371114232503737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004977597959624
mentalhealth,saa-rim,2020/03/24,"Looking for an alternate medication source Hi guys. I've been taking a small dose of anti-depressants for the past year, which was prescribed by a psychiatrist at the college I was then attending. After I graduated, I couldn't technically have appointments with him anymore (as I was no longer a student) but he told me that he was happy to keep writing me prescription refills until I was able to see another psychiatrist. 

Thankfully, my life has finally stabilized as I've gotten a permanent job that I started this week, but my meds happened to be running out soon and I was out of refills. I emailed him more than a week ago and got an out of office message. He was supposed to be back the day after I'd run out of meds (Monday), so I figured it wasn't worth contacting the counseling office over it, as I figured he'd send the prescription in quickly and I wasn't sure if he'd get into trouble for continuing to prescribe to me. 

It's now the end of the day on Tuesday, I haven't had my meds since Sunday, and he still hasn't responded. I emailed again earlier today, telling him that I was out and asking again for a refill, but he didn't respond. The city we live in is currently under COVID lockdown, so I'm worried that he might not be reading his emails at all, plus I need to get the meds delivered to me once it comes in. I don't still have his business card, so I don't have another way to get ahold of him. Is there some other way I could get a prescription written for me if he doesn't respond? I'm doing ok, but I don't like not being able to take my medication. I don't have a physical prescription or any proof that I ""need"" it, although I've been taking them for about a year now.",7.08628194134797,5.737902361516039,7.863080089178531,74.62468701766423,64.74344023323616,11.335894357743099,37.08609157948894,10.46071229359064,3.716290138912707,1342,58,268,28,17,453,169,343,0.05,0.9129999999999999,0.037000000000000005,-0.2322,2,1,0,0,0,0,35.0,1,0,1,0,14,6,0,0,20,1,38,4,0,0,3,37,61,22,0,6,9,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,13,15,0,1,2,1,1,5,14,1,0,0,18,2,40,5,47,34,3,52,0,0,2,0,32,15,0,5,31,189,53,5,0.22155277767272927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981965848386032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753317430929631,0.2323174049324037,0.0,0.0,0.10986041122203688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035609698487157,0.0,0.0,0.08518020519675808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954240501707193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844593252903885,0.0,0.0,0.1428832129949179,0.0,0.0954115413825282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811500033483277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135011926312868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315043641606462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885979977681481,0.0,0.0,0.10968604118704396,0.09795919480335497,0.11792352579489053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099284728428853,0.0984631442653748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824463948214819,0.05411974805391456,0.0,0.0978175808600355,0.0,0.09302426687609452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4921903809918446,0.22319111497090874,0.0,0.11751624270781486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16427857735927628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179732387605037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574859775397852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080636650042153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827443963517119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163537357705699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840809818132316,0.0,0.17693233444083156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440543549356184,0.0,0.2498701743397632,0.0,0.09682344650996576,0.10198801556330732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500306387370828,0.10585158675099804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17585828248366325,0.17771627439152585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124988000772046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426727249280908
mentalhealth,SeokjminMatcha,2020/03/24,"People with Borderline Personality Disorder, how did you realise that you had a disorder? A few years ago, after I was diagnosed with anorexia nervosa, BPD had popped up somewhere and I've looked at some things and realised that I have certain symptoms. There are certain things that I did as a young child that may relate to it too.

Unfortunately, at the moment I'm 16 and too young to get a diagnosis, but I really want to know if there's anything wrong so that I can get the correct therapy. I'm seeing my GP about this.",6.432904290429042,6.717752306930696,7.2146039603960395,73.31946369636964,65.53465346534654,10.297689768976898,34.65511551155116,10.125756701596842,3.4823056105610566,417,18,77,9,6,139,69,101,0.1,0.848,0.052000000000000005,-0.6768,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,0,7,3,0,0,6,0,9,2,0,1,3,15,17,8,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,9,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,2,8,2,11,11,2,9,0,0,2,0,4,3,0,3,6,56,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990490543484004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847846146822454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28281148311086696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279124102220952,0.0,0.0,0.5147049945758657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346350682126219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12340620484119698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18856452475993488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15567393626593656,0.19606744118391664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14385177741399074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789364035561475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23339228886021784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567912406557856,0.0,0.2983606273757022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13244476108004272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455089755779749,0.0,0.14460213165723926
mentalhealth,RockyK96,2020/03/24,Online Psychiatrist? I’m having a rough time right now and was put on setraline by my PCP but need to discontinue because the side effects were too much. I want to discuss medication options with a psychiatrist is there any doing tele medicine online that are legitimate and affordable?,9.04033333333333,10.059258900000003,9.082,59.63433333333336,60.0,12.266666666666667,40.66666666666667,11.855464076750405,5.444466666666668,235,12,35,7,3,77,44,50,0.0,0.961,0.039,0.2047,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,0,6,1,0,1,0,8,9,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,5,7,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,24,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935415838403581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631341201487417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4348490470133299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3173175855390101,0.32006821964529397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4339345415287779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3686327467061545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517026865930847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.254602501260954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IndistinguishableTie,2020/03/24,"Urge to hurt myself I wanna start by saying I don't self harm, and haven't done so in the past. When I was younger, I used to bash my head against the wall when I was really distressed, mainly because of this urge, but I've never cut myself. I used to, and still do, get these intense urges to hurt myself, especially when I'm really feeling upset or depressed. One I've had since I was really young (my first memory of it was when I was 6 or 7) is to cut my own fingers off. Its really an intense feeling, I have trouble thinking of anything else when it shows up. It scares me, and I'm kind of worried that one day I'll go through with it and really hurt myself. 
If this is really too insane for this sub, let me know, and I'm sorry in advance if it is, I'm just not really sure where else I should post about this.",5.414810533076427,4.1741102369942205,6.639614643545277,81.69669877970458,68.01734104046243,9.76981374438022,29.048811817597947,8.841846274778883,1.9738688503532442,633,17,140,9,9,216,97,173,0.212,0.715,0.073,-0.9836,0,0,0,0,0,7,21.0,0,0,0,2,11,13,2,3,3,0,16,2,2,2,2,23,29,16,0,4,7,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,12,6,0,0,4,1,0,2,4,11,0,3,7,4,19,2,20,20,2,21,0,4,0,0,2,6,0,4,12,97,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836305627974152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027211779624023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492398862848227,0.0,0.11341750350594355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347563929678396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200068082029577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331647396990307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11200863191762823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879840387590534,0.0,0.07483790852302714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13514371017725546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4229048757317187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371265269699778,0.07236897694903614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465375469159285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015612672591098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17846224636093022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570535789192033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611494445958155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5905119749856329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471880236752784,0.1318366423255936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737303249713315,0.0,0.0,0.10892870142696898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14740720485895756,0.09320518903180668,0.0,0.10516140590006497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410871551331015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437650097136283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274619166026351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13372945104214914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,megascrubbro,2020/03/24,"family drama and stress hi this is my first post hope this is ok

my sister is coming home she left after she got evicted and was worried that the people she was living with would try to do something to her. she feels better now but has no were to stay. she plans on going to a local shelter but really wants to see the cats that we have been taking care of since she left. now i live with my mom and she said that if she wanted to after she got back on her feet she would be ok with us figuring out a way for her to see the cats. however due to the self quarantine and the fact her and my sister had a major falling out she does not want to have sis on the property and she for sure cant her in the house.

what sucks is that I'm in the middle of these two and i don't want anyone to argue but no one is willing to concede even a little. I told my sis I would talk to mom but I cant make any promises. it just sucks all around and the stress is killing me. it not like we can all go to a therapist right now so idk what to do.",0.5193152128107883,2.1334821283185867,2.4956384323641,96.33821533923307,81.6991150442478,5.543699957859252,16.956595027391483,6.42735559955562,-0.4653440370838604,795,14,193,7,21,266,122,226,0.165,0.772,0.063,-0.9728,2,1,1,0,0,0,9.0,3,0,0,3,8,14,4,2,14,2,25,1,1,1,4,40,46,14,1,9,8,6,1,1,0,4,0,1,1,1,11,17,0,0,2,1,0,4,7,6,0,3,9,4,31,8,31,32,3,29,0,0,2,0,32,14,2,2,9,141,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0839819482565068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863517202527151,0.0,0.0,0.10993819002075143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496129110519684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092227398601523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12591305236530986,0.0,0.0,0.1063814179100318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807273954629536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08156836422413431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642163874432612,0.0,0.06244361048683977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504617661456064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14037196993809525,0.0,0.19754308499174408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387719653046647,0.1226600261925022,0.0,0.14249853848926447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663073164349976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26835891558498115,0.0,0.0,0.06033421893756238,0.12377607432354655,0.21809958663047435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243496437699249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289275538083526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836845175648962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561701863964086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11827564092720358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911510817815716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054654534955666,0.117473582534978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19682166155811648,0.0,0.12883392633867632,0.0,0.0,0.10215769456863856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507374490734448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163098363073378,0.0,0.0,0.2829299615927932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116394119149719,0.0,0.09285410191712637,0.09926191910687723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143389114428901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180063292896492,0.0,0.08384611020686797,0.0,0.1206382698966212,0.0,0.14855124895388186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913660655112253,0.0980258824078688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541682986604685,0.0,0.2631854035776398,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,smannanpm,2020/03/24,"Protecting your children's mental health during the Coronavirus pandemic In difficult times it’s easy to overlook what children might be thinking. Often, they’re not able to articulate how they feel, yet can be just as worried as we are, anxious about what may come. They pick up snippets of news and conversations but not the whole picture, compounding the fear, without a balancing voice.

This is a free planner for children to own, encouraging reflection and evaluation of their feelings. The schedule allows them to feel some agency over their life, whilst thinking back on the day’s achievements builds their  sense of self-worth.

[https://parityplanner.com/kids-planner-reddit/](https://parityplanner.com/kids-planner-reddit/)",12.8440629095675,15.366514376146787,9.644325032765398,53.65201834862387,52.02752293577981,10.632241153342072,40.34207077326344,10.608840637214634,4.761570380078637,613,27,77,12,7,177,85,109,0.079,0.825,0.096,0.5927,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,1,6,2,6,4,0,1,7,0,7,2,0,3,0,23,13,6,0,0,5,0,3,0,0,2,2,1,0,3,4,4,0,1,6,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,0,4,8,3,16,9,3,11,0,0,0,0,13,4,0,4,6,55,12,1,0.2380946112817107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689791398116523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830800593723708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20509742528152872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15355132720096026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26792263193407834,0.3611633682199436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530834379864915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16817326524245846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23994336772174046,0.25258075679046993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483846060720808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051228261405653,0.0,0.0,0.13883488254450954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658241306472685,0.0,0.22951470884955186,0.0,0.0,0.2417966351440413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aria_blossom,2020/03/24,"I didn’t realize I was sick again until I let spite decide my life or death I was driving to the grocery store and everything was fine but a car was coming straight at me in the wrong lane, over the double yellow lines in a 45 speed limit zone but I made no effort to honk or move. I knew I was in the right place and if they weren’t going to recognize their mistake I was fine with that. Let me die then, I know I’m right. They made a super fast swerve in the last seconds thankfully. Everyone was fine. I did my shopping came home and told my friend about it because I thought it was funny and he did not feel the same. He was angry that I could be so careless with my life. I tried to explain that wasn’t trying to kill myself I just wasn’t alarmed. That lead to a long conversation pointing out my signs of slipping back into depression. And how despondent I must be if I would so easily let myself disappear from this world based on spite and knowing I am right. Anyway the signs aren’t always obvious, if you have a history of mental illness or just aren’t feeling yourself please get help before it’s too late",3.1649122807017567,4.660675140350879,4.151754385964914,87.8572807017544,73.91228070175438,7.171929824561403,24.947368421052627,7.793537801064563,1.229489473684211,884,28,183,12,18,286,137,228,0.225,0.634,0.141,-0.9790000000000001,3,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,1,3,4,10,14,3,1,12,0,27,4,0,4,2,45,43,19,3,7,11,0,2,0,1,2,4,0,1,0,8,12,0,1,9,1,2,8,8,8,0,1,21,3,30,6,22,14,2,33,0,1,1,0,11,16,0,6,9,128,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737900183484315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847177589521197,0.0,0.08599310250264577,0.0,0.12003758314803573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161343008482267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151668525829842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11263047969856355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150075608242653,0.0,0.14640522100049566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479551463494066,0.12678187731128673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142655375553244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898797452138552,0.0,0.07370165829605473,0.0,0.0801715977525353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455420205231754,0.0,0.1415016512959408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15606967776811834,0.0,0.15505341141208953,0.11498839102660008,0.15912966241307624,0.0,0.0,0.43275153742496414,0.1992795152184549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248398103525988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669619151564726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421623048423749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993184142559876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14738493666979469,0.1548491479030614,0.13335386325117166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614112098660778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987549328657294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119913998210827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479551463494066,0.0,0.1915503963813925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020991284452024,0.15423456318358628,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jElly_bOOty52,2020/03/24,"Maybe.. I get stuck in my own head with just my thoughts racing. Telling me lies but beliving, maybe. I end up just hurting myself in the end. Try to breathe but I'm drowning in tears, hands shaking. Trying to tell myself ""stop, shut up, i know this isnt true! No, shut up, stop thinking!!"" But maybe what I'm thinking is true. I just dont wanna be a fool. ""Be kind to yourself"" I dont know how to do that when these thoughts keep coming back. Yes, I'm okay. I just have a war in my head that just makes me wanna stay in bed. I just want to go to bed..",-0.9717514124293772,1.0674088305084766,0.7780000000000022,103.49609604519777,92.05084745762713,3.485649717514125,17.18870056497175,4.604124745555138,-1.0686763841807916,414,11,104,1,15,133,65,118,0.2,0.6679999999999999,0.132,-0.8394,0,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,0,9,8,1,1,3,2,8,4,4,2,2,27,24,5,2,3,9,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,3,6,0,0,3,4,4,0,0,3,1,14,4,17,19,1,20,0,1,0,0,2,10,0,0,6,61,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188266612534905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331168580643863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3622240348295277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737414844620967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073733385379539,0.0,0.08782490384867131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171917437649437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654312223189413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13735640413813602,0.0,0.16092277675738278,0.16985505254252714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031522578670203,0.0,0.4657487734849064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471206446662326,0.0,0.2583937174505893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701380409511632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19803755158703132,0.0,0.2453645479668305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20983609677204765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114781497892348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DumbleDawson,2020/03/24,"I have no motivation to continue my University degree or to pretty much do anything, but I don't want to give it up. What do I do to counteract this?",4.096451612903227,4.482034935483874,7.203387096774198,71.02508064516131,70.61290322580646,11.361290322580645,31.62903225806452,11.20814326018867,3.773696774193549,117,5,24,4,2,44,23,31,0.099,0.774,0.128,0.2185,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,4,7,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,5,7,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,21,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4385691279811592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5112503423618243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3917766136180483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5421976547249464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3143453445647084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stanman1581,2020/03/24,Help for Sister I just got a text from my nephew who said that he overheard a bad argument between his mom (my sister) and her boyfriend. In this argument she said that she wanted to die more than once. He doesn't believe that she is in immediate self-harm danger. She has struggled with bipolar and substance abuse for a long time. If I told her he reached out to me she'd be furious but I want to call and make sure she's ok. I'm worried that she'll just say she's fine and act like nothing happened. What should I do?,1.8505555555555588,3.781289611111109,2.8257037037037063,94.03966666666668,78.81481481481481,5.801481481481483,24.68888888888889,6.742157984588678,0.6935377777777783,410,15,91,4,10,130,76,108,0.175,0.687,0.138,-0.4854,0,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,8,2,1,3,1,8,1,0,1,1,15,17,6,1,4,4,4,0,1,0,2,1,3,0,0,7,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,4,3,18,4,12,9,1,6,0,0,0,0,25,3,0,1,3,55,25,0,0.0,0.24571183459623014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315395176488693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336466683235269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21175855052085965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152280892597099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658610313303145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183385781706828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900269471351673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131557657825696,0.0,0.0,0.18352510697445296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13842801138614533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428813900884989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989870639539245,0.0,0.0,0.22085333239019508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39453245461125774,0.16491719871875662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163429602586158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21679899621361204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19545355023449928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092516501654713,0.0,0.0,0.19816083646060215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24463663773585145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21060483841922872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hbsdjbvjhbk,2020/03/24,"[United Kingdom] A friend needs help Throwaway.

I have a friend with severe mental health issues, including potential traumagenic DID, frequent panic attacks, and suicidal tendencies, and I know that I alone can't help him through this. I know he needs a therapist, and he knows he needs a therapist, but there are a few issues with that.

For one, he has very nosy parents who would flood him with questions, and could very well refuse to let him see a trauma therapist;

Two, Boris Johnson ordered a country-wide lockdown 24 hours ago, and leaving your house for any ""non essential"" reasons could be punished with a fine;

Three, he believes even if he could see a therapist, he might not be able to talk with them about their issues.

Is there \*anything\* he can do in his current situation? I feel like something bad could happen if he doesn't get treatment soon, but it's really hard given the situation.",9.498048780487805,8.56989404878049,8.234268292682929,72.53969512195124,59.73170731707317,11.370731707317074,39.40243902439025,10.411451182825502,4.085587804878047,720,31,123,13,8,220,110,164,0.161,0.7440000000000001,0.095,-0.9085,2,2,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,2,0,6,10,2,1,10,0,18,1,0,1,0,31,30,9,1,10,5,1,2,1,2,2,1,0,0,0,5,10,0,1,6,0,0,0,3,5,1,3,2,4,12,5,12,19,1,7,0,0,2,0,25,1,0,4,6,76,17,0,0.10324762201773674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152278731368546,0.0,0.0,0.10693339855676913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021192348388118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849639956530664,0.0,0.0,0.11745907535584155,0.0,0.0,0.08620745172875738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632471379246885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32973929938278457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819408059120068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0522050999360995,0.07376012179932147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15953771330820662,0.0,0.05394262111581955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130153116977656,0.0,0.09248958942817123,0.0,0.0,0.10974739412838527,0.0,0.0,0.13840940934404575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016781100378001,0.11913389351738403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32329107843653754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17022657870709054,0.0,0.0,0.10932432393704017,0.0,0.1055776887535462,0.0,0.05044157287903417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404931889401424,0.1095294108744054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22967041044085054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699632607486784,0.0,0.0,0.12113883849491143,0.11464426571841227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566096598820558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614307047102083,0.10615575130139772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16454997446690145,0.0,0.0,0.1166404246128468,0.0,0.0,0.23210930610744104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948506365167962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11293614072024788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298652762744513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4795137878894566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085792424508457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703802022606905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283201173487443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334414836240688,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NicklesAndDimes101,2020/03/24,"Why am I like this? I have to have plans, and if there is a plan in place. I must stick to it. And when plans don’t work or don’t go through. I get very upset. 

When I was little my parents had to stop telling me what we’re were going cause I’d cry if it didn’t happen. 

Now I just get depressed, or anxious, or even still cry. 

I’m the same way with my routine. I sit in the same spot, same side of the bed. Same stuff. 

And I’ll get angry or upset if it’s thrown. 

It’s breaking me down, and I don’t know what the hells wrong with me. Please someone, does anyone experience this or know why.",-0.9198982188295162,0.9644166030534363,1.0572213740458023,103.03784223918578,89.07633587786259,3.7986768447837154,15.60356234096692,4.604124745555138,-1.2965423918575063,449,9,117,1,15,147,79,131,0.19699999999999998,0.767,0.036000000000000004,-0.9642,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,4,7,6,1,2,5,0,12,0,0,1,1,24,21,14,0,4,9,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,9,6,0,1,2,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,4,0,13,1,10,16,4,16,1,1,0,0,2,6,1,8,6,72,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013459911404159,0.0,0.12462059325171945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18308841615290308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3915483923855265,0.0,0.0,0.15350681514320808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15596781253670994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771737621943128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17434038815969885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27934904770777985,0.0,0.20258123542186093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15760571300245002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19589800204051594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707280104407343,0.17863046349773548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19790019957709015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186209476860498,0.19563993088333226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101131731272194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14233246189249074,0.14900590895204147,0.0,0.0,0.2040274888187982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557784172602764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14705609486912333,0.0,0.14146844537596567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3216446298949863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12975151492901113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19486345058835935,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,larrynotthelobster,2020/03/24,"I need help! This is the first time I'm posting anything but I really need help! A few years ago I (f, 22) had a really dark episode for a few years (emotional abusive parent, traumatic childhood, yada yada). I got myself better but now it's starting to come back and it's scaring me. I feel down all the time, can barely get off the couch, I feel angry with no reason and lost all interest in my hobbies. The cherry on top was me getting fired today from my job (to fiance University) because of the covid-19 virus.
Does anyone have any tips on how to be happy again and work on my confidence? (I have an emotional blockade to seek professional help, so if anyone has any tips for that as well I would be really thankful! )
I'm sorry.",2.6945782493368675,4.700991041379312,4.466206896551725,82.90832891246689,76.51724137931033,7.220159151193633,24.94694960212201,8.139509932561175,1.6552334217506632,571,20,109,10,13,193,98,145,0.17300000000000001,0.612,0.215,0.7763,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,5,6,7,0,1,9,0,10,0,0,2,2,17,23,9,0,4,3,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,2,1,1,4,3,14,5,16,16,4,21,0,1,0,0,4,7,0,1,12,71,18,3,0.0,0.17805172067554562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332100337710631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043847870664787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101520424695303,0.0,0.12366381163062586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555247088822924,0.0,0.09160646068083876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290633816300534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944891074069206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150697452502366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33807909232862465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519674679853127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278241389086329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702533962191734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201889280990952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599709081467445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30217920532337617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491251004693336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16404330013396232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22285454095841933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668629961592618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392224869696832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28881071839413874,0.15450809171037186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045184458879393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168220955005337,0.10636566866175608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383533553612039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752535342023843,0.0,0.14244346387068038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511559013007932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094022471100346,0.0,0.0,0.1067512995072992,0.0,0.0,0.19354480135045515
mentalhealth,shaze225,2020/03/24,How do you cope with feeling behind in life? Especially if your like Asian or desi? I’m 21 but emotionally I feel like I’m stuck being an 18 year old. Or even younger. Due to my circumstances growing up I wasn’t really able to make a lot of friends. I started college at age 18 and I stopped after my first two years because I just felt like I needed to move to a new place. I ended up following my parents to a new city and decided to study engineering. Now I had to take a semester off which at the time I thought ok that’s fine but in reality I ended up losing a lot of my work ethic since I couldn’t get any internships or any good jobs for that matter other than delivering pizza. Started school and fell into a deep neurotic state trying to keep up with my classes and developing so much anxiety that I ended up almost dropping out. (And this was due to the fact that I didn’t have any friends in this new university and I felt incredibly lonely just constantly studying in the library) Now I feel like just killing my self deciding what I really want to do with my life. Or if it’s worth continuing. I ended up just sleeping more and running away from doing anything involving studying. Every time I would open up a book or try studying something I would lose my mind thinking I’m just going to fail. I know that in order for me to improve and I need to keep trying but part me feels like I just gave up all hope. Like I just want to die in my sleep. How do you guys deal with this? If I had to make analogy I would say that I’ve been climbing a mountain my whole life trying to struggle to get to the top but I keep getting pushed down and down and down and now I feel like I’m back at square one.... like I don’t even feel like doing something as simple as eating a full meal. Or have a routine simple routine.,3.064880140143832,4.433942959893049,4.615591001290799,84.94125668449199,73.94652406417113,7.51156186612576,26.80029503964595,8.104835398774808,1.617346229024525,1433,52,298,22,29,481,187,374,0.10099999999999999,0.727,0.172,0.9739,2,2,2,0,0,1,24.0,0,3,0,7,17,21,1,1,15,1,19,8,2,4,2,75,54,29,2,12,20,1,8,9,2,3,3,1,0,2,13,18,3,4,13,1,1,8,4,6,0,3,11,10,43,15,56,38,8,66,0,4,1,0,12,29,0,13,35,197,56,7,0.0786928763961769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879954854832685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16054156332934424,0.0,0.0601998350512008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475753220644133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393454778529364,0.06050996452728785,0.0,0.04797044705023778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503904322775993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112890017185127,0.0,0.0,0.08167078169631747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08052245825141828,0.0,0.08851889417410383,0.27879412481535193,0.0,0.0,0.10395180537896356,0.0,0.0663021423597078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387368965737035,0.28109103310504485,0.1511150040625616,0.0,0.0,0.06693612046231354,0.0,0.0,0.12159584219513254,0.0,0.12334133996491753,0.0,0.044722975133995535,0.06600385116288084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791831970861779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07815978223803155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809053731318176,0.20983753278055547,0.08706200841274271,0.0,0.04324754687082913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674931747037194,0.3460082802880458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760743996581997,0.0,0.13380373885627864,0.0,0.0,0.10505621210929543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945737234273392,0.0,0.0,0.08363807387958871,0.0578483186695968,0.11669954146789788,0.0,0.22800621116933484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257493621114702,0.0,0.053324329633697966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737912656389955,0.08521671657223619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221730690904548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100825343331307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257973381102316,0.0,0.07964139212509395,0.0,0.0,0.08209383235984555,0.0,0.0,0.06509556054466424,0.0,0.1574994149007779,0.0,0.0,0.1211632416717425,0.0,0.0,0.11139844588645204,0.0,0.0,0.06579076830095616,0.0,0.08226688046455287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591672496006218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050423217715587366,0.0,0.062473353778972736,0.09177289811591853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21370919014773154,0.0,0.07687150571690615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928301947211774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878577862117014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057289351244051274,0.0,0.0,0.16770348474875985,0.0,0.0,0.1013512647036784
mentalhealth,ScarCrow143,2020/03/24,"I feel stupid for doing this I'm really just trying to figure out what this is and hoping somebody might be able to help me I keep on getting short psychotic bursts or I need to scream or just hurt myself in any way I clenching my jaw or weeezing to pushing all the air out of my lungs slapping myself hitting myself in the head, digging my nails into my arm,screaming out of no where it seem like this energy i need to get out inside my chest",8.21565934065934,5.707309000000002,8.194587912087915,76.8316620879121,63.3956043956044,10.41868131868132,33.739010989010985,8.07648339933343,2.4766021978021966,353,10,70,3,4,115,64,91,0.11900000000000001,0.775,0.106,-0.3237,0,0,0,0,0,2,2.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,2,0,4,4,4,0,1,20,14,4,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,2,14,2,16,11,1,13,0,1,0,0,1,11,0,6,1,50,19,0,0.27598943730636905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876822814494007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13954855205683794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883861798972606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832447856309252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849899022188029,0.0,0.0,0.2741197845058139,0.0,0.0,0.295452400785781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24531209282655314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348344983029374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927811787329326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092853414264209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17680590065189672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512504182853688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18737871150856075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190675690829077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,twistedluce,2020/03/24,"[NSFW] Fuck me. Kill me. Rape me. I'd love it. [NSFW] Is your personality mask cracking yet? I wondered if mine has. I don't know if it's even personality shit to begin with. Have you been so broken that your memory of what you truly want (when you grow up) as a kid was to have so many partners to fuck with? I've had that desire even before I learned what porn is. It's hard to have little to none recollection of your traumatic past but I know I've been so fed up with my former colleagues who joke about being a pornstar when no one really know how I wanted that for myself ever since. They don't even live up to their nasty mouth, piece of shits. 

My desire? Lust. Ever since I've had those sessions with a few men so far, I couldn't be satisfied. I've been faking all along. Well not for this one time that I had myself violated by a guy who took opportunity to have sex with using my ex' shitty cheating move on me. His dick was the best so far, probably because it's thicc and that he manipulated me on having sex with him. 

I've been masking everything since then, I met my last ex and I've been trying to be the good girl I could possibly pull off. I've convinced myself that everything is not my liking but certain words out of my ex' mouth and now everything is shattered. I broke up with him because this mental health decline is getting out of hand and if I were being honest with myself, it's also because that I want to be what I was designed to be. Give in with the desire. I want to be violated, I desire to be raped. I'm not even blaming my dead uncle for everything now (sexually harassed/abused me when I was a kid), I'm convinced that I like to be this way. I want to pursue what my heart desire.

At this point, I've reached my new max of apathy or something. I'm drawn to dark stuffs more than ever. I couldn't even get to say it here. I know you'd downvote me. Let's just say that I don't care for the deaths from this crisis. I'm twisted as I can be.",2.172028201110951,3.645596646489107,4.033067226890759,87.78273287281012,76.4818401937046,6.699017234012247,22.074419598347813,7.39963492309942,0.6734216493377012,1537,41,336,19,34,521,193,413,0.209,0.643,0.149,-0.9890000000000001,0,0,1,0,1,1,47.0,0,7,2,2,25,25,10,0,9,0,43,18,7,3,5,55,69,23,3,16,10,3,2,2,1,0,1,2,0,8,28,16,1,0,7,1,0,4,10,12,1,2,16,4,55,13,53,38,6,36,0,1,0,10,31,15,5,5,18,234,83,2,0.0,0.11596251851328145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826833982498567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17898590115838656,0.0,0.08328200893385565,0.0,0.1027108052793313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978720121933447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814296464893221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32321822960620056,0.26559294599505723,0.0,0.0,0.3518447860073348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18096249008114834,0.1022683396929497,0.09388790467586973,0.0,0.08209053355940939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690883677603124,0.0,0.0,0.08767424120337873,0.0,0.0,0.10403354111250457,0.0,0.11597899392525675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828105629350217,0.0,0.21515194251322686,0.07977888222688446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008092593666816,0.0,0.09563079811720362,0.09809362732966297,0.08642292013462803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833345555340244,0.0,0.0,0.09922701979564053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986321286337388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402262882681568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452555267601412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13264143210449092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343006173008801,0.0,0.17091640930292598,0.0,0.0,0.09252083671954517,0.1103361672900764,0.0,0.0,0.10552275393585014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269941893202992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15566375743364982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009287542349928,0.2428826138162765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534677887261393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204022013553072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057070050003884126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10873958321594457,0.06644877964197736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845301316738635,0.0,0.0,0.2886377113162648,0.07768637380148029,0.0,0.0,0.08799883574528257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613819455173687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PhatJax19,2020/03/24,"I'm starting to feel manic again. I'm feeling very paranoid, not about anything specific just a general paranoid and anxious state. Not all day long but for long periods of time. 

I'm finding it difficult to sleep more than 4-6 hours a day and yet I don't feel tired. I honestly can't tell if it's just part of getting used to working overnights or if it's a red flag for a manic episode. 

I'm not eating much at all with most of my diet coming from water, coffee, cigarettes, and one meal a day. I'm just finding it hard to force myself to eat more often as I just don't feel hungry anymore. 

My performance at work and in school has improved dramatically and I'm finding it easier to manage my ADHD symptoms. 

I've never been diagnosed with bipolar, but I have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and ADHD. Now that I'm thinking about it I do have a history of entering a manic like state right around this time every year and I almost always end up self destructing and blowing up some aspect of my life. Now that I'm recognizing the pattern I need help. I'm older now and the stakes are higher. I really can't afford to self destruct and blow up my life right now. Does anyone have any tips on how to level myself out and check myself before I do something I regret? I'm prescribed Wellbutrin, but I stopped taking it six months ago, as it triggered a manic like state in me. I haven't had the time or money to go back to my psychiatrist and attempt another method of medication.",5.608750932140193,5.832793640939598,6.784787472035795,75.90627889634604,67.28859060402684,9.441014168530947,31.991797166293807,9.2995712137729,2.8336929157345274,1187,46,221,21,18,402,161,298,0.11800000000000001,0.807,0.075,-0.8991,1,0,3,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,4,16,8,2,0,11,0,15,14,1,3,3,54,37,22,0,4,14,0,5,2,0,0,8,0,0,2,11,18,5,1,8,0,2,3,9,5,0,2,3,6,22,3,37,34,9,44,0,2,1,0,4,13,0,8,27,142,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26772363213409683,0.0,0.09873511674267696,0.0,0.11153489767666716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268033688295182,0.0,0.0,0.07574487912118369,0.1167957426170042,0.0,0.12583211546642625,0.1104629101433076,0.07788222050375464,0.0,0.09165946837892472,0.09915529571294933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564735238084191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947795046036324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594737687823493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21550022445499545,0.0,0.09593479948906823,0.2261046504747113,0.0,0.0,0.12765561206469356,0.0,0.0974728112787628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279470963272755,0.0,0.0,0.09865308481134848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384574911997826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252762088238171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054086307934247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05819349639147221,0.0,0.06330204356827163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977810638976506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465828779356816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969071593447607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734750096362846,0.10883310557022273,0.0,0.0,0.19714251269852154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11220757233462238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890557524139653,0.0,0.08187999071623757,0.0825897588014312,0.08590613890428105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07547662085556016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206179215277715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135538565157769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902425031170571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272646461993326,0.0,0.0,0.2323954225835537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146435131109772,0.0,0.0,0.0857487765538603,0.0,0.0,0.07883810562483855,0.0,0.0,0.09312193718998496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11577053185653265,0.08374683931048102,0.0,0.0973544478181446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137031280055171,0.0,0.0,0.19484656300865652,0.12801942066906305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619993689743583,0.0,0.09190339179243236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16217762783372128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172758693657262
mentalhealth,rudestboy420,2020/03/24,"Help me get better This is probably going to be a long read. I just feel like i need to take it out. Thank you for reading.

My girlfriend broke up with me 2 days ago. She said i needed some time to find myself. She said she couldn't help me anymore, I have become way too negative and started making her too. We had a talk a few months back that I would communicate with her and express my feelings more but i didn't. It kills me inside to see that i have hurt the person i love so much. She told me that maybe i needed to work on myself more without her being always around me. I really miss her right now...

Okay back to topic. I don't remember when i really became like this. I mean, i've always done what I do. Somewhere along the line (3 years back probably) i just got miserable. Things seemed to have lost their colour and life looked a little bit more grey. I started to avoid responsibilities by doing mindless activities. Even writing this right now is against my will and it feels really hard but I know that it's the best step. Come to look at it, I never do anything. I just sit home playing my video games. I dont care about anything or anyone for that matter. I'm just mindless and i passed most of my life on auto-pilot. This fucking kills me. I am in university now studying Computer Science. Being 19 years old i know that it seems young for some but for me its terrifying. I've come this far yet I have done nothing to better myself?? I've become a bit overweight. I've always been a runner and the ""sport guy"". I used to play tons of sports growing up but since i stopped i caught a few new kgs. I'm running now everyday and trying to eat better to lose them and get in better shape.

But i'm doing this thing, and i do it  and i run but i feel like i'm not really here. I'm just so in my head that i don't feel most things because all I do is think about stuff. I walk around, i have good friends that love me, i had the best girlfriend a man could ever want but yet i didn't really live in the moment. I was always somewhere off with my head. Even right now, it's like the world and my memories are a little blurry. I started lying more, lying about the things I do in order to make people like me. Because i rarely do something now. I am neglecting school right now. I've always had no problems with school and have passed my classes due to my intellect and ability to quickly grasp concepts ( all nighters ). But is that all there is to me? A guy who plays his videogames, slowly loses the people who love him i even started crying at times. Hell, im fucking crying right now.  I'm lost, i don't know what to do. I just want to experience life, i want to feel everything.   
But i don't know what to do. I don't know where to start. I still feel the breakup deeply. Ironically thats the thing i feel the most. Losses. Lost things. Unused opportunities. Wasted time. I have wasted my life so far. My girlfriend probably fucking hates me rn bcs we ended a bit on bad terms because of me and my MINDLESS doings. 

About life, i have read many things. Hell, i've helped more than 10 people through the hard times. I think i am not a bad person. But damn, am i selfish.. I am so capsulated by my ""feelings"" and ""needs"" that i hurt other people. I just try to escape from things via videogames or whatnot. I've never really tried to talk it out, to treat it like a human. Instead i always ran off to my comforts. I really wish to get better. A typical day of mine consists of some going out with friends and playing games. Even when i go out with my friends, yeah i laugh and have some fun times, but i just don't feel sincere. I just don't feel that i'm giving my 100% to life. Even during the fucking videogames. I just play them and feel numb. And the time passes. I want to use my time wisely. I want to make good for the bad i've done. Most of all, i want my girlfriend back. But that can't happen in my current state. I'm just stuck in this vicious cycle of doing nothing and then feeling bad about it. I just don't feel like im worthy for someone to like me yet i have many friends and people that like me. I have no goals nor ambition. I want to feel like im 100% alive. I want to stop being so boring but yet i haven't done anything about it. I just don't know where to start for turning my life over.   


How do i get out of my head, and into the world? How do i start to fully live?   
How do i begin?  


Thanks for reading my dudes and dudettes and I hope you have a wonderful day.",0.9634234748797256,3.116405625403665,2.5617232705784154,93.58049092726436,83.16576964477933,5.16966235363898,19.59799872586279,6.39352644273079,-0.0003459370400480388,3482,94,764,32,98,1138,329,929,0.163,0.642,0.195,0.9818,1,1,1,0,0,0,119.0,2,2,3,16,62,75,11,2,32,2,69,20,3,8,7,151,169,51,2,18,31,0,17,10,8,2,9,2,1,6,49,43,2,4,30,15,0,16,24,32,0,0,21,24,137,43,96,140,27,117,2,12,5,7,49,39,7,14,68,508,186,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03531194939843752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988789890087614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03950631570680687,0.02785405152894108,0.0,0.0983441742734659,0.0709244471534484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252479454759953,0.13304460069733612,0.07285042903805095,0.08799081403851139,0.0,0.0,0.08361023056024536,0.17615722161025227,0.13047081922607562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04061515669271594,0.0,0.0,0.0686298660296735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031805569400365136,0.0,0.08751530395583329,0.07707220361261312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16306302965199065,0.04668715019373095,0.0,0.0,0.040761871746237216,0.0,0.0,0.03528261123078561,0.0,0.0,0.13155553899686406,0.03603367628399227,0.0,0.0,0.035801763504201216,0.038966963875441504,0.0,0.0,0.3021319446323721,0.11383454394469728,0.0,0.0,0.03640911316463763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310786908561358,0.14730987141316504,0.0832500479135245,0.038214038607812736,0.06791864839111415,0.06682459960322164,0.031860252768809307,0.0,0.0,0.07888722285969316,0.035226582835779986,0.0,0.07136993523975595,0.039329511993746825,0.12264877940803752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010310113709357,0.0,0.03995846064585937,0.03956584397054664,0.0,0.0,0.08528989333103529,0.0,0.12908819342318847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814461202387687,0.0,0.1313559717750224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19695995825554347,0.19461713540008305,0.07985168430155748,0.07035131560398729,0.035253345832537045,0.06690391952336093,0.08913192980589159,0.1304561349358694,0.0,0.10785983857663384,0.0,0.07977192830055893,0.08077430588102917,0.04002032048198998,0.04339276155330498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03179648009476852,0.0,0.029283827115449895,0.11815068355977222,0.061447503787513534,0.03847357262744856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644686765114228,0.0,0.0418008718609036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808531213759356,0.06956600305821274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288488844275067,0.0381173902572965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15938594252819288,0.0,0.1786384110732286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04512608885244116,0.17009737429615854,0.07578575647694076,0.0,0.0,0.08063172143499947,0.031743899756757885,0.0725298603698752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032952507260597536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03375266401906486,0.03066747230916117,0.0,0.0,0.1973714218238989,0.0,0.031812845889656195,0.06660886708641311,0.0,0.0,0.045602352216380926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029951492939619382,0.06403686230159628,0.0,0.07335073110206128,0.0,0.0,0.21172058135852245,0.05105022320947752,0.0,0.0,0.16259964169070645,0.0,0.0,0.03806472375021073,0.0,0.0811374875000226,0.04332980849973307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881051880879227,0.0,0.0,0.18796904980660908,0.03161972884579384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04580909540103269,0.038400198585045,0.043200123363771735,0.029000868062718663,0.0,0.0,0.028298142262299,0.0,0.0,0.05130577658559638
mentalhealth,queerine,2020/03/24,"I feel bad for not forgiving my parents I struggle with Generalized Anxiety Disorder and Depression due to the way my parents treated me when I was a child. My little brother was the ""favorite child"", he had better grades at school, was never blamed when doing something wrong. All I got was : ""You are stupid!"", "" why can't you be like him?"", ""what's wrong with you?!""... They made me feel like I was nothing and didn't deserve the few good things happening in my life. They never trusted me and always said that I made up all of my problems, that in reality I didn't have any.

Our relationship became a little less toxic since I don't live with them anymore (it's been 2 and a half years), but I can't forgive them. I have so much issues now with trust, self-confidence and feelings. 

I've been crying today and feeling really bad about not forgiving them... 

What should I think about it? Is it ok not to forgive your parents? I know that they didn't mean to hurt me that bad...",4.583536045106726,5.4893141518324615,5.2761256544502615,83.40398308497785,69.78534031413615,8.180587998389045,28.82843334675795,8.384062270229773,1.9442240032219087,757,27,151,11,13,245,112,191,0.2,0.6990000000000001,0.102,-0.9397,3,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,1,4,6,1,6,22,1,1,6,1,21,1,0,2,4,34,33,10,0,2,4,4,4,2,0,1,1,1,0,2,10,10,0,0,11,0,0,0,11,10,0,1,15,5,33,12,15,16,5,15,0,2,0,0,25,6,0,0,10,107,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359090874324058,0.0,0.0,0.08466176456306836,0.0,0.09523934156636064,0.0,0.12346689307592545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3118476728607646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101068750957088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13675335807333028,0.0,0.0,0.1072284952063138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426835648715546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517963138153408,0.08894019357482794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442160381752487,0.09957107747460156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009168176282504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327588199455456,0.0,0.0,0.12994180954757695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841991983590873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793543032696112,0.12164522364227873,0.2495560315155952,0.10993252858468386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356028502423825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561298630659033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151911755451747,0.0,0.19203846889241247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11945757362343384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4147152798763436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912616155244445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797555284321696,0.0,0.0,0.13366245276326708,0.0,0.0,0.118424506616348,0.0,0.0,0.12599691911067773,0.0,0.0,0.12987681002715512,0.0,0.0,0.1029846397401935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584334698797824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015058133462826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270982092637122,0.07977221284419454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800795132413615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881938142413853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233856172006283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722343572538663,0.0,0.08017154622671778
mentalhealth,PrometheusCat,2020/03/24,"Struggling Again Hello,

I’m really struggling at the moment and I don’t know what to do. I don’t even know how to explain it. This is my first time on this page and I don’t really know what to expect. 

I get like this sometimes. I have problems with depression, anxiety and OCD. I often end up feeling like I’m stupid and I can’t do anything right, and I just get so overwhelmed and worked up. 

I’ve been feeling stressed, generally upset and I’ve had a headache. I just feel like giving up entirely. 

I don’t know what I should do.",-0.38234224598930666,1.8631437818181809,1.7371657754010703,94.13280748663105,97.54545454545456,4.770053475935829,20.106951871657763,6.522977012572876,0.3852459893048126,416,15,89,6,17,138,60,110,0.20199999999999999,0.667,0.131,-0.8713,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,7,11,1,5,2,0,13,0,0,1,0,24,26,9,0,3,2,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,0,8,0,0,0,5,8,0,1,2,3,12,3,9,23,1,11,0,2,0,0,3,6,0,1,8,58,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443081093814352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15523359877931334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16247425864717405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707792066430588,0.0,0.0,0.12459409970364956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861442241066007,0.2695270876869575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16045600432341706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19711189755222944,0.18095945532534485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4146836428376473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764780596503956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18050178496375324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416935970256415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16109644165487985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865685239052914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160850237659424,0.3944123094174939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999675836569517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733123950732662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,randomuser6554,2020/03/24,I dont really know whats happening I am a male and i was first really passionate about different things but past 2 weeks i have just lost motivation for everything all i do is watch netflix and sleep if i try to do something i feel instantly tired and like i cant keep doing anything but just lay down,7.363494623655917,5.812775887096777,8.26677419354839,72.60349462365595,64.32258064516128,13.427956989247313,35.182795698924735,12.45797560212912,4.322886021505377,243,9,50,8,3,83,47,62,0.114,0.74,0.146,0.2255,1,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,3,3,3,0,0,1,0,9,3,1,1,1,13,14,6,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,2,8,2,4,12,1,4,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,1,4,34,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21074501981138885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26756560021696363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30014236629275715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23016238881608864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294897295698423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178349537465023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264646671485755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22762971089362805,0.0,0.0,0.14074355231807734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511547031187695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795588141817858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24447241568142364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.328123049996844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562807459040651,0.0,0.0,0.19715505591783186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17013866775476802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943444449580465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738722353099478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054246005581879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KatieRoseDM,2020/03/24,neuropsychology assessement My neuropsychology assessment came back invalid.  I was rested and answered to the best of my ability.  Has this happened to anyone else?,7.317399999999999,11.451620640000005,7.615500000000001,51.59525000000002,82.6,10.5,38.25,9.516144504307137,6.2284000000000015,136,8,15,5,4,44,22,25,0.0,0.772,0.228,0.7579,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,1,3,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849988004497468,0.41762763205765385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134141853217957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42774415402796856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4661782951694935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34049200614269537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3604335204776081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OliveOdyssey-7,2020/03/24,"Recently unemployed and unable to see the person whose company I want the most Yesterday I was told that myself and a colleague were being let go (aka fired). Obviously this isn’t the greatest of news to hear, but it’s much worse concerning the fact that jobs/job interviews are basically non existent at the moment, due to the virus. The funny thing is, is that they didn’t fire me because of the virus and what it’s causing economically, but simply because they no longer think our depot/department is needed anymore. They chose a real shitty time to do it. 
Obviously the thought of being unemployed is terrifying and my anxiety is at the highest it could be right now. Usually in situations like this I go to my partner as he is the best at comforting me and calming me down from the metaphorical “ledge”. But now the UK has gone on a lockdown, not a full on one but they are advising we don’t socialise outside of those who live with us. My boyfriend doesn’t live with me. I won’t be able to see him for 3 weeks. The thought of it breaks me in ways I’ve never felt before. 
I know I’m going to spiral and possibly get into my bad habits. I have a past history with self-harming and I really do not want to revert back to it, but I already have those thoughts and it’s scary. 
Is there any advise you guys can give me? On ways to distract myself or maybe find ways through it all? In the past I’ve tried everything in the therapists book: colouring, painting, listening to music, watching uplifting movies/tv shows, gaming, reading books, talking to loved ones (which has obviously been the major help with my boyfriend), even meditating. But I’ve always struggled to completely distract myself, other than having someone else’s company (again my boyfriend’s is the one that helps the most). 
If anyone’s going through this or a familiar situation can you tell me what’s been helping you?
I’d be very grateful for any advise.",5.825060975609759,6.702493731707317,6.395409891598916,76.59522865853658,66.96747967479675,9.727235772357725,32.99017615176152,9.827888789773867,3.220713550135501,1533,65,281,33,24,500,207,369,0.10099999999999999,0.784,0.115,0.6683,6,1,0,0,0,0,43.0,3,3,4,1,6,9,0,3,25,0,35,1,0,1,6,47,58,18,0,5,11,0,3,1,1,1,0,2,0,3,24,14,0,0,7,5,0,5,9,4,0,3,11,9,35,5,41,39,8,37,0,0,4,1,32,14,0,5,15,197,59,9,0.10686853595351227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793208687919267,0.0,0.08892318297324217,0.0,0.0,0.1453485382532763,0.0,0.08175413749239079,0.0,0.10598487123364136,0.07472496515592285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217530754720738,0.08923076361945381,0.13029213519874466,0.0,0.09093725285683946,0.0,0.11215193521849802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978342471732712,0.0,0.0,0.11204962668827484,0.0,0.0,0.08532582998696438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927494871814216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058566009612778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604654919203896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026105537397766,0.0,0.09767590577473992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05583439919955088,0.10251803765311898,0.2429434070750341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581665244126508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044860698822173,0.0,0.21489518087274964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605053184824614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05873215250638555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092803185773015,0.0,0.052210568528626516,0.0,0.18873375033858625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645302612426136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736380847283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856067037717769,0.0792416652832272,0.08242360316361035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21725065722464731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040362199890508,0.0,0.09331348348301474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047821699499553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689745609708004,0.1216397904151301,0.06846272065707894,0.0,0.1055197865378517,0.0,0.0,0.0912651457845395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703207736779124,0.0,0.1114871901611667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240249424055758,0.0,0.0,0.0905493637119037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172219742543923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589688109123936,0.09340781084476467,0.0,0.0,0.12408260713371674,0.07099870663505221,0.06847704267665859,0.0,0.2545250406473513,0.06231590272849358,0.0,0.0,0.10211746585407644,0.0,0.07255672087749611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285496903763028,0.0,0.11770059407975828,0.08817773434014453,0.12606766274734446,0.25448180855700797,0.08572349333119092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089081681710804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wraughtnam,2020/03/24,"How can I helpS/O 

About 6 years ago my wife started a new job and things we’re great we welcomed our second child in 15. From 2018 this started to change where she felt her boss was doing shady stuff(she works with financial stuff). Then she started to tell me the office was bugged and that her phone may even be bugged. It was never real serious but she felt she needed to leave.

Last year she left for a new company and better pay, this was in February I think. About may it started again that the company was out to get her or set her up to be fired. I wanted her to talk to someone but she refuses to see and medical doctor. 

September she told me she was looking for a new job and I was understanding but I just wanted her to take her time and not just jump at the first thing. 

Very fist interview she was offered a job with way less pay but a lot closer to home. She accepted right away and explained that she felt she needed this.

At this point I didn’t know what to do since she won’t talk with anyone about her thoughts. She thinks this company has deep connection with religious and government secrets. She confronted her boss about it Saturday.  Today I find out she was fired for harassment. 

She wants to work on stuff like feng shui and essential oils but she won’t talk with anyone. 

We have 2 kids together and I’m starting to get worried that this is getting worse and I have no idea what to do.",2.415094562647752,4.614718358156028,3.170567375886524,90.93388888888887,78.18439716312056,7.014657210401893,22.85579196217494,8.045849151850463,1.1399990543735226,1115,35,234,20,27,351,152,282,0.106,0.8420000000000001,0.052000000000000005,-0.9508,3,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,3,0,0,4,10,8,2,0,8,0,24,2,0,3,1,56,51,19,0,5,9,1,5,1,0,4,2,0,1,2,19,20,0,1,13,0,2,1,6,3,0,2,15,8,41,5,36,30,2,37,0,0,2,0,45,15,0,4,20,159,60,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742772812888208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792591379664168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09266420706173316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722840818050012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043352950804068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009498875776978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514283177906513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840949010857383,0.0,0.09014416086902552,0.08389288515622323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545871018102603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10873766470879344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893187697956447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11133895220059806,0.0,0.0,0.2936190699440525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054203342797041566,0.08039494416449962,0.0,0.1044327598795953,0.10715955787913373,0.0,0.0,0.04818463520944321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282263917018164,0.0,0.0,0.08384995739081626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935728494290594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462627526443274,0.07606795641209907,0.2857664704261448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323529353252884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226020120605563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842277316814419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859370793635984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158606066851727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356714324060728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3490468585117509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3387162237880604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741559451230705,0.23782023435011826,0.0862051768082147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104805697247066,0.12639361778974556,0.0,0.07829957663671737,0.057510751660811286,0.0,0.09348776575212707,0.09424323426000598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267517580621616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137838913677943,0.17451996345885334,0.07828627714224566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436046466809412,0.1001614722563014,0.10051030859345923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702633423475515
mentalhealth,almondcreme25,2020/03/24,"Advice for recovering from grief, sadness, and loss? Hey Reddit Friends,

Thankful for this community. I'm struggling and could use some perspective/advice. Life has been hard in the last year. I lost my brother to addiction. And a few months before that, a relationship. I'm a Christian and have been an active member of my church, although the events of the past year devastated me and I've been spending most of my time with close friends, at work, and at school, as I started a graduate program a few months before all of these things occurred. I also turned 30 this year.

It feels like all I have now are a few close (albeit awesome) friends. But really no community because I have withdrawn myself. I feel devastated, lonely, and unsure of how this all happened. Been going on dates and it's making me think more about what I lost with my ex. I have turned down good guys in the past because they weren't Christians and I was really looking for that similarity and connection. Everyone is getting married, having kids. 

I went through a lot of depression and anxiety in my 20s. It was pretty bad and kept me out of college for 4 years, so I generally feel behind in life even though I am still pursuing my dreams.

All of this sadness has made me more reclusive and almost self-centered, as I am thinking too much about it.

I posted something on social media today after a long time and nobody liked it. It was about essential oils and how they have might help our health with Corona Virus.

My existence feels empty.

Just needed a place to get it all out.",4.526897042093289,6.559336836177479,5.0388267918088765,80.68108432878273,71.42320819112628,7.613708759954497,28.249288964732646,8.344100000000001,2.1011138794084183,1235,47,221,20,24,394,170,293,0.147,0.7490000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.8832,0,2,1,0,0,0,38.0,1,0,2,4,13,17,0,1,14,0,22,4,0,5,5,49,47,24,1,2,2,2,5,2,3,1,4,0,0,2,16,22,0,1,6,1,1,2,2,10,0,0,13,7,29,7,37,32,14,36,3,8,1,0,14,14,0,5,21,160,45,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959154928593918,0.0,0.21439936622773806,0.0,0.0,0.1098508688524104,0.0,0.0,0.08772877936012984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392185370314043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915967230525585,0.13374683953869065,0.0,0.1866969199235324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758824985379528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944863114287911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724572434108081,0.0,0.0,0.10482511702528666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22187483726226004,0.07837124649076803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25426685482437666,0.0,0.114629703766701,0.0,0.062346266782495025,0.09201296874690773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862238778261757,0.09700925960722752,0.0,0.0982715894996234,0.0,0.0,0.11660826835882848,0.0,0.0,0.07353104680233599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894219038263779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497176267393484,0.107189870218495,0.0,0.0,0.0970829612919006,0.09212218692967457,0.0,0.2395057376668582,0.09326485519170737,0.0,0.10380283822262294,0.07322704502216504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637665785017183,0.0,0.0,0.1751264382633464,0.0,0.08064371160209205,0.08134276313184967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20944625347746607,0.0,0.0,0.11461541043125299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506434676908807,0.1116065374478875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055602819214158,0.0,0.0,0.11777906715772413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102444471736568,0.0,0.0,0.11444328017466335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182753909482818,0.0,0.08445408391174153,0.0,0.0,0.07764775493561385,0.0,0.08760828832422983,0.0,0.0,0.11468451867165427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100999011868848,0.0,0.0,0.07288124190526267,0.14058543172984042,0.10778181722956576,0.0,0.1279364257899856,0.0,0.10398482248988428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386489010914015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474744561442412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169500328280998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986448052161557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28257838254394685
mentalhealth,Dusicyon,2020/03/24,"Feel like I'm hiding myself in all my relationships Does anyone feel like most human interactions are just manipulating people into making them think you're someone that you're not?

I feel like every interaction I have I'm forced to present myself in a borderline dishonest way or I'm forced to distort or hide my feelings just so people don't leave me or dislike me.

Every single conversation or relationship always has some semblance of playing politics. Especially with my parents. Anytime I open up I'm constantly punished for it by being yelled at or ignored.

I'm just so tired of it. I don't even think the things I feel are strange. I wonder why everyone can't appreciate or at least respect each other's emotions. 

Its just so painful, and I desperately want a relationship where someone can apperciate me for who I am.",5.1069730269730265,7.435461805194807,6.423506493506497,70.10855644355647,70.55844155844156,8.894305694305695,32.625374625374626,9.466822959209583,3.4966509490509488,674,32,109,16,13,227,99,154,0.244,0.665,0.091,-0.9766,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,9,8,1,0,3,0,10,2,0,2,1,31,25,10,0,1,11,1,5,3,0,0,2,1,0,1,7,5,0,1,8,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,6,17,5,14,24,6,11,0,0,0,0,10,8,0,9,5,74,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211459858748372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018028063165615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733553959549998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741041104836326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637738084843978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616355482399548,0.0,0.2453386808824535,0.13912143787806944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3680838531933404,0.3120374432053949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541631696970534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21338982431801248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718521747596273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492242766946046,0.0,0.16166506001829997,0.0,0.0,0.20187328614796735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.468940850434757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467228808154262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672627568594716,0.186581689217161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16733904353051593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587519463321057,0.1155658496619762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137606356046458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15789063171237736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fedeftre,2020/03/24,"I am sad but don't have a specific reason why. To preface this my dog died two days ago and I am so extremely sad to the point that I don't even want to get out of bed. However, I know logical why I should be sad because my dog died and I am sad now. I don't feel sad in the sense of ""I am so sad because my dog died"" but rather just a general sadness that extends to every edge of my life.  The  reason I am sad is still unspecified in my brain it's just a ""you are sad"" with no object of the sadness the only way I can know why I would be sad is by logic because. Dead dog = sad. If anyone could help explain this to me that would be great.
(I am 13)",1.7481632653061183,1.9459551428571444,4.190619047619048,91.2002142857143,75.80272108843538,7.5126530612244915,24.223809523809518,7.554174236665415,0.8050168707482994,494,14,126,6,10,175,77,147,0.377,0.5660000000000001,0.057,-0.9965,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,8,13,0,0,8,0,21,2,1,2,0,24,27,7,4,7,6,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,6,4,0,0,8,0,0,0,4,12,0,1,0,1,19,1,14,20,0,9,0,12,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,83,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414436998864766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157073376572983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918058729976284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17812599528590173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739872733230664,0.0,0.0,0.10290546423221288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.496806163309969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053903989627911,0.0,0.134439401218739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068026231103465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336551077760937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17591967608667586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695226583093974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753842062583765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270464571480457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135547617746915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083938653652382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32811636684175016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742787365770195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15587066769721916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411487584840264,0.12665433411484572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4319445899688223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266991208177561,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JanArnesseen,2020/03/24,"prejudical? if a therapist team outlines you as ""inferior"" in their eyes, does this affect how they treat and assign stuff to you?

if there are patients who do things like smoke weed or watch porn or have tattoos or many other things that are normal in society, do they try and limit these things because of their mental picture of you?

like there was a team who thought because I ""looked smart"" that I should not have gone into looking at porn and I should be using my smarts to ""help save the world"". I didn't care since their points weren't even logical. why should a person who ""looks smart"" go and ""save the world""? what makes their morals any better than others?  Who says any one group or person has to help others? they are there to treat the sick, and that's that. they also said that not going to church is bad, but let them force me....

surely if one set of traits is good for one, it's good for all. i don't care who that offends .",4.321708939708942,5.385230010810812,4.0562162162162165,91.32806652806656,70.51351351351352,6.773388773388772,21.798336798336802,6.67199483983844,0.2514656964656967,732,14,156,5,13,221,111,185,0.068,0.757,0.175,0.9469,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,3,9,4,6,18,1,0,6,0,19,4,1,4,2,31,31,16,0,7,10,0,0,2,0,3,1,2,0,2,22,6,0,1,2,2,0,3,5,3,0,3,6,7,19,15,16,20,1,11,2,1,5,2,26,7,0,7,2,107,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426357194683755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943308297951391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930142914272827,0.17420043609129154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636850007750028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913577078904413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503797298271374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437294700697793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16240752902475594,0.23968714830272886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19154307441426516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14610766124388916,0.0,0.1396109410961381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35995748068926425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537558584962036,0.14486104778563344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399256904658658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399951114584036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904638808161761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495200418834692,0.0,0.0,0.13507072344609167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13591455811017875,0.11362638447939108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819438562467365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635669771841628,0.0,0.0,0.13466564081458246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16589830415371168,0.28477556927464337,0.0,0.0,0.1134332296401712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970082530225947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12340513167635625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12892978329544194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,virus5cx,2020/03/24,"I'm starting to panic about my health I've been dealing with Depersonalization for awhile now and have minor problems with my eyesight because of it.

I see so called 'floaters' (little white spots floating around) and signs for visual snow.

But just now I saw what looked like a hundred little shooting stars flying through my vision for a few seconds. Something I could compare to mdma hallucinations. (have not done mdma for 5 months now)

I'm really getting worried and I'm starting to panic about it... has somebody experienced something like this before.

Please respond",5.979955555555558,8.818849440000003,5.4993333333333325,75.42522222222225,69.6,6.044444444444442,33.111111111111114,6.937597516519254,2.3865777777777786,464,22,68,4,9,142,70,100,0.114,0.7959999999999999,0.09,-0.539,0,0,2,1,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,2,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,12,15,5,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,3,5,6,2,14,11,1,9,0,0,4,0,3,3,0,0,8,44,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16983505579936367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629799669232392,0.0,0.16234011847026106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948081785802879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523226721007698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19668627548867235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19523464652351988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967491535114276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20279070600348054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186411390581158,0.38242427832216974,0.0,0.0,0.16020753578610986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15227914175869067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4476795240183464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20941965304816548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825511332437455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222188468763566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15202732493111182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937442351624219,0.0,0.0,0.2700707808218853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19374681622881765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GauPanda,2020/03/24,"When alone I feel compelled to fill silences, often by singing songs that I've changed to have vulgar lyrics. Whenever I'm driving and I don't have music or a podcast to focus on, I basically just stream-of-conscious chant or sing continuously and it's almost always really vulgar lyrics, often me changing the lyrics of actual songs to be more sexual. Is this a pretty common thing? I dunno if it's just me being bored but it occurs every single day.

When I'm at my house I'm also always filling the silence with song, but due to my family being around I do not use any vulgar lyrics.

Am I just weird? Thanks",2.987851239669421,5.126034892561987,4.790909090909093,80.30636363636367,76.10743801652895,6.7140495867768575,21.743801652892564,7.686295010490155,1.1259355371900837,486,13,87,7,11,165,81,121,0.046,0.885,0.069,0.5551,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,4,0,9,0,0,2,0,20,15,10,0,1,9,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,6,4,0,0,1,5,0,3,2,2,0,0,0,4,10,1,11,12,2,12,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,7,6,58,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.22241926097259546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282312338316144,0.23605873781810385,0.0,0.18226935995203608,0.3792991804241524,0.0,0.0,0.1549949619209694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20289914594362174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4822230883726486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14699101101353504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19203434582058607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21486483510527035,0.0,0.11524434989355828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629917024486998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318788919150795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14601284483176735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20984020732299605,0.0,0.0,0.15142143104545389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19685166481502356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bioholc1967,2020/03/24,Staying informed Does anyone have a suggestion for how to stay informed but not be overwhelmed? I feel that I need to stay up on current events going on in the world but find myself overwhelmed by the current circus that has permeated most media. Any suggestions would be appreciated.,8.757733333333334,9.706467840000002,8.138000000000002,66.40233333333336,60.6,9.866666666666667,38.66666666666667,9.725611199111238,4.089466666666668,232,11,34,4,3,73,39,50,0.048,0.865,0.087,0.6131,2,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,11,8,3,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,8,5,1,12,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,1,3,26,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914090539729188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18419583815128415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230528688760076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331977305970824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407695379157769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497128984809156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19532943137398898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8423415058408854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18713256226702327,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alol-11,2020/03/24,"Confinement makes my social anxiety worse Every time we have to make a group call, I get soooo nervous I feel I might throw up. I hate this :) knowing I will have to do this for I don’t know how long is so demoralizing",0.8633333333333333,3.1244908888888894,2.8666666666666667,90.54000000000002,84.55555555555556,6.266666666666668,20.11111111111111,7.554174236665415,0.5995777777777778,170,5,38,3,5,57,36,45,0.225,0.701,0.07400000000000001,-0.7269,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,7,0,0,3,0,9,14,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,8,0,4,12,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,2,24,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290189049439856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056924764882701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25223398080320225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513715737386242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15640961246856336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955680571335889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3290542513097273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649349663132907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.399666521251606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31758658282461033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30517224555920314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17456633072306385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30508583637516473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zzirtezz,2020/03/24,Friend is incapable of letting go of any grudges I like to think of myself as a very understanding person but this seems to be something I cannot wrap my head around. My friend that I have known for years that is an excellent person if you are close to him cannot seem to let go of ANY grudges he may have towards someone big or small. if you have wronged him in any kind of way he will remember that forever and talk badly about that person whenever his name might come up even sometimes go out of his way to directly or indirectly talk bad about them randomly. Even if the person says they would like to talk things out and try to make amends he will refuse to and try to annoy them. I'm just trying to understand the psychology behind this so I can help him but I have no idea what leads to a person to think this kind of way,7.498713017751478,5.726554396449702,7.241649408284022,80.76945636094678,64.20710059171597,11.053550295857987,32.367603550295854,9.827888789773867,2.6078100591715967,659,19,143,11,8,209,97,169,0.126,0.767,0.107,-0.5548,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,3,2,7,11,1,0,5,0,18,1,1,2,0,34,30,12,0,4,8,0,0,2,2,5,0,1,0,5,9,8,0,1,9,0,0,5,3,4,0,0,0,1,18,7,30,22,0,18,0,0,0,0,27,9,0,11,3,95,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269940960628771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905033396910502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18580493272433826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584581090617046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698029349380914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17192767848824902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18970510383577904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419102109211668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07457925758118368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256057759911212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23173284369623245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22755405666978926,0.0,0.10871789929236833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427092214935642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803564779346395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4857659179847926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260426933433342,0.0,0.0,0.08848319284861604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20258478368750732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942753247325896,0.08565800640331117,0.1100449237384844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26829419975246044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392018948812876,0.1425895262082491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22662694054995036,0.0,0.0,0.23166366985255854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180610661771343,0.0,0.2649533266360734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904017737978744,0.12165190933794247,0.0,0.07165165904434585
mentalhealth,Hiiki12,2020/03/24,My body feels so heavy I took some pills but the doctor said its not from them. Can this be an anxiety Symptom? Does anyone else have it? I also feel if my vision is distorted and everything feels very weird plese tell mee D-:::,0.9506666666666668,3.5123026222222222,2.0194444444444457,93.9425,89.44444444444444,5.666666666666668,16.38888888888889,7.1686216300943375,0.13322222222222235,178,4,37,3,6,56,42,45,0.16899999999999998,0.7809999999999999,0.05,-0.7140000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,4,4,1,0,0,8,9,5,0,1,3,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,4,5,0,1,6,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,22,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21161110414278927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024283963980699,0.0,0.0,0.18502372272991072,0.27112752431324544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939256453500514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27084285316145434,0.2315648204570295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22105039893810224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378173084429199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4013891989352111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517077772096572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27503446419436306,0.0,0.0,0.23128362600755026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939950345159498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183336269941301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xheiri,2020/03/24,"Can anyone help me? I feel like no one cares about me. I work as a nurse and all I do all day is taking care of ppl. I think that I have a strong personality. I’ve so much love to give and I’m no afraid of it. But I hate that I want to be important to ppl I care. I hate it and it makes me so sad. I’m always the friend who texts first or calls first. Sice the whole corona started no one of my close friends or of my family asked me even once how I was doing. 
No one. And I’m here texting them to make sure that they stay safe. My boyfriend tells me everyday that he loves me and that I’m beautiful and important but I still feel empty. 
I was diagnosed with depression 4years ago. And since then I’m taking antidepressants. Sometimes I’m ok but right now Idk. I feel useless and I don’t want to be here. 
I know some ppl have real problems... but I can’t be happy somehow. 
I just hate the feeling of “needing” ppl or wishing that they care about me. 
How can I stop that? Even my male friends. I only used to text me when they where horny and bored. Of course I’m not intouch with them anymore but it still gives me the feeling of not being wanted as a person. 
I used to have friends who just stopped texting me when I was in the depressive phase.. bc they couldn’t handle me. 

Maybe I should just start love myself. But how do I do that?",0.12271126760563432,2.231637098591552,1.7902640845070437,98.03462147887323,86.46478873239437,4.958450704225354,18.38204225352113,6.322622252153567,-0.30916338028169,1032,27,246,10,32,335,137,284,0.135,0.655,0.21,0.9601,0,2,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,6,4,21,27,3,1,8,1,21,4,0,7,3,57,61,28,0,8,14,0,5,1,4,1,1,0,0,3,14,12,0,3,7,0,0,0,9,10,0,5,3,5,45,17,21,52,5,20,0,4,0,3,25,4,0,5,16,163,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482564568376866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962384283977339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490126700750727,0.06691043530878918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945958914450129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977127625150597,0.0,0.3902596089650617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061713759290031124,0.0,0.16483965540673054,0.09712589401502246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640801461024948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021039192905396,0.0,0.24192506806461406,0.06836275577902212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16279201813777888,0.0,0.0,0.29572721590958395,0.0,0.0,0.1835939705574913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186646748763267,0.0,0.28342965818630644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414067939210442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05259010670161507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0467505319096542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25909870756143705,0.0,0.12775100102202466,0.0,0.09613599881026004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07034501310397219,0.07095479144929176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019094112866856,0.19453118533665206,0.07277847392479896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16711003576916736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156481857947037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891903810946274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817208896681516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915784183251419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464234964467562,0.0,0.1354633171000547,0.1019954945782284,0.15284034099503538,0.1600064639625737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901890681146668,0.0,0.14389773269829567,0.0,0.08363948075215474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06131590325392872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529522689135884,0.0,0.0,0.16932578372941234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10683728178250958,0.11004167602692287,0.0,0.0,0.06966529463022925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jayda-P,2020/03/24,"I feel like I’m drowning 
I’m not entirely sure how to express how I’m feeling. 
My head kind of feels heavy, too heavy to carry around.
My head hurts.
I feel like I can’t see. I can see, my vision is fine but I can’t see. 
Everything feels so heavy.
I feel stuck sometimes, I have moments where I freeze. 
I feel aimless, I can’t do anything but stare sometimes.
For the past few days I’ve experienced a lot of anxiety, I feel out of control, I’m not sure or certain of anything and I think that drives me nuts. 
I can’t do anything, I don’t think I’d be able to focus. 
I feel numb, I feel like I’m drowning.
I’m not sure what to do and I don’t know if I want to do a thing about it.",-1.566372549019608,0.35381541830065544,1.1216045751633992,100.64672058823533,94.16339869281046,4.105751633986928,18.761111111111113,5.6839178017228535,-0.4914755555555557,521,17,133,4,20,178,74,153,0.162,0.7390000000000001,0.099,-0.8943,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,7,11,0,0,3,0,14,3,2,3,4,33,38,9,2,2,7,0,11,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,13,0,0,1,9,2,0,0,1,16,22,9,13,36,2,7,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,3,6,72,26,0,0.11810153463651492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034735073881836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915625003088265,0.1051354048058747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13246091347217515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616571954436359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061420441003854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5971568446629034,0.25311527982638604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424124936612637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264301354624276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298457437013335,0.06490551481426937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17309533285338513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004057013971198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274127827774601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823348973442014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336108752078689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339278961619914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846141182709636,0.15134938932823874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965934503386756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisathrowaaway19,2020/03/24,Help with possible HOCD Hello there I want to start off this post by saying if any lgbt members are offended by this I'm really sorry.i really do have a problem explaining myself sometimes. Ever since I was 12 ( I'm 19 now)I was terrified I was gay. I dont even know why i grew up in a house that mainly supported lgbt rights and a few of my friends growing up were gay and never had the slightest issue with it but For around a year now my anxiety has gotten  worse I have lost my attraction to heterosexual pornography like I wont get an erection like I use to but I will if I look at gay porn and  even when I do finish to gay porn it doesn't feel good like 95% of the time where as with heterosexual pornography I will finish like after 30 minutes but it will not have an erection but it will feel a bit good. When I was 15 I watched a bit of gay porn but i did not feel any attraction what so ever as I did with straight porn. If I'm talking to a lad as well I could have a thought pop into my head of me kissing them. Has anyone who has had hocd felt anything like this.,2.076503593786228,3.610278709251105,3.884451657778808,88.49256202179458,76.88546255506608,7.245907720843959,24.28217018316717,8.032893268588372,1.2220273127753305,845,28,187,14,19,285,123,227,0.09,0.731,0.179,0.9638,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,12,16,1,0,12,0,27,11,1,1,3,33,45,17,0,6,10,0,4,5,1,5,0,1,0,0,10,9,0,0,7,0,0,2,6,3,1,0,13,7,24,13,27,26,4,25,0,1,2,10,8,10,0,3,17,127,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19021444949999988,0.0,0.10698984966993216,0.0,0.0,0.09779092574204233,0.0,0.11508999368304328,0.1245019479064264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053741794363093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11166404543277317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639107916835353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847478156867726,0.2530164459586351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212146965630076,0.0,0.1342841849464682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805279504404997,0.0,0.07306925569763277,0.0,0.0,0.2346100153778524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14353313098193893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374287264057757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137563855093054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14597386374880905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686148200186901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3416341392250243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744424718900655,0.0,0.15266990502084482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786596473541894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15766720462307807,0.13394387957941062,0.0,0.0,0.13382379494267554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17919132696561538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943669797141634,0.0,0.1112195125971892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569075282233142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832166751632452,0.0,0.09899115976579274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587075136208186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241136750935816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110304492280408,0.08155145744872161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079112311741005,0.0,0.0,0.08249099494709655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12574780131312366,0.0,0.12619874972771927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252573506186264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006300902055178
mentalhealth,And_awayy_we_go,2020/03/24,"I dont know what to feel My nan (not related by blood) sadly died today due to complications with dementia. 
It's sad,I've known her for nearly 10 years.

But I've never personally dealt with grief
Even when my dad died when I was 5 I remember never feeling something 
Sure I cried
But I never felt.
My nan (by blood) is also sick
But because i was never very close to either i feel i wont be able to mourn,I'm not afraid of dying i accept that I'll be gone soon,but it feels like..i cant feel
I have a fear of abandonment and attachment.
I dont know how to act or feel.",1.0862749445676272,2.6823997560975634,3.448957871396896,90.25130820399114,79.89430894308944,6.749150036954916,19.31189948263119,7.686295010490155,0.4385837398373993,442,10,102,7,11,153,79,123,0.215,0.723,0.062,-0.9546,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,2,1,0,10,3,2,1,5,30,20,9,4,0,7,1,7,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,12,0,0,2,10,5,0,0,4,7,15,2,13,13,1,13,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,1,9,60,19,0,0.145510125631225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11636439489593026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08870162200863763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983604037678514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4530496119573356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3410735670738565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610806564074524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16373934555809447,0.4414457496553787,0.103952462825245,0.13971253964084787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993711925676582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710888973830697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.448905517206012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705382911399815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16483460683642898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202080369245633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714157136582736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137926585045993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006109269890795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370375016964218
mentalhealth,BuddhistHighlander,2020/03/24,"I Want to Improve My Mental Health So I'm really trying to find ways to help my mental health. Be it eating healthy, working out, Nofap, you name it. But I keep relapsing on these goals. I really need help. I need to manage these conditions, or I'll never get better",0.8402425876010753,3.3670836981132046,3.1704043126684667,85.8179245283019,89.37735849056604,6.047439353099732,17.005390835579515,7.447530270364453,0.6686787061994615,208,5,39,4,7,71,37,53,0.043,0.736,0.221,0.8357,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,10,7,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,6,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,22,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952825685052648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259368914576509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018102088235786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536060682136445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4694071486267127,0.0,0.0,0.29599958477051397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19626011134910748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4450355699694768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3274456866612821,0.1702971109866247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.282904485867763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499109414517286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023550251796892,0.17526337575045126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16074742642967516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spirited-Lychee,2020/03/24,"Missed a job interview twice and I hate myself for it. Since we went online for all classes it’s been hard to keep up with things. My obsessive thoughts have been worse. They are stuck on repeat. I’m stuck in my head and I forget everything else. 

I really wanted this interview, and now they aren’t emailing me back. I hate myself. They gave me once chance, and I missed it. They gave me another chance, and I missed that too, because my thoughts were consuming me and I couldn’t focus on anything else. I hate myself.",1.481150038080731,4.143201623762376,2.2776237623762405,92.5710129474486,87.2178217821782,5.879969535415079,19.650418888042648,7.321109707123232,0.6512431073876619,408,12,82,7,13,127,61,101,0.278,0.685,0.037000000000000005,-0.9719,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,4,0,3,7,3,1,1,0,7,1,1,0,1,15,23,6,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,7,0,1,10,1,23,0,8,12,1,8,0,3,0,0,10,4,0,0,3,56,29,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049407288395728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608342721551372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15028485137226213,0.0,0.1191412284162693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265378080067379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17565302523330525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17507999339330188,0.5788833079555302,0.20058256945607375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19394863119444025,0.17372016147867467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081421453737173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252068304408733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616738122038929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984472334517316,0.0,0.0,0.3103223993187322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152783027185457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181179124033141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19917476861785552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Organizedchaos90,2020/03/24,"I had to delete a game because I can’t handle my anger I’ve been playing Pokémon Go since the day it came out, and today I realized I needed to delete it. 

For anyone who doesn’t play, they brought in a battle league recently, where you fight other players to go up in rank. At first, I really enjoyed this aspect of it. Being stuck in isolation now, it’s almost the only interaction I have with the game now. 

But over the past few days, I found myself getting more and more angry when I wouldn’t do well. I feel like a child cuz my mind is blaming the game for being unfair, but I would be at the point of tears and seconds away from throwing my phone at the wall. 

I realized anything that makes me this angry can’t be good for me. Maybe I’m extra anxious with the current state of the world, and can get back into when I can go outside. But for now, my relationship with the game is toxic and I needed it gone.",2.699592198581559,4.1381564414893655,4.110765957446809,87.9136666666667,75.01063829787232,6.5026950354609925,23.171631205673762,7.0316486544052195,0.7291903546099299,713,20,149,7,15,236,113,188,0.139,0.7929999999999999,0.067,-0.9094,1,1,0,0,1,0,18.0,0,1,1,2,8,9,3,0,13,0,17,0,0,2,0,26,32,11,0,4,3,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,10,11,0,0,4,6,0,7,4,3,1,2,7,1,22,6,25,19,4,36,0,0,0,0,12,15,0,1,14,110,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18794765579584213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21203992309479686,0.0,0.13123946923132154,0.0,0.15445553429611394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17634396636231311,0.14432450686209913,0.0,0.1144160497955314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146710509962114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.242093209410919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490333572043183,0.13408807971767592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15965176401035422,0.0,0.20579593686296774,0.0,0.0,0.1961239299478743,0.0,0.3200111609076728,0.15742817475601542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169743053964308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12528668727475906,0.0,0.188563075395568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18951665514118368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783443008926577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274915781487288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17917442423327604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743076844684258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024108813458716,0.0,0.1853244193521361,0.2015122848400628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15526177792227633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17791123392549915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16875875318812958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13333188412026095,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mrsrakestraw,2020/03/24,"Sibling Rant Got a call from my Sibling this morning. Thankful to God for a blessing of a second job. 
Backstory:
Part of my Bro's pattern of behavior is going hard for God, God is in everything, witnessing to everyone he can, bending any conversation toward the Bible and coming to his church. Bro faithfully attends every church service... complete devotion to the Bible. 
Bro was working at soulless big box store as the cashier in the the self-scan checkout. Bro meets mgr. of a fast food place nearby, gets offered a job by said mgr. 
Bro quits big box job and goes to fast food, but visits big box job regularly for shopping. During his last visit, big box offers bro a temporary job....back at the self-scan checkout. 

This morning he calls me to 'talk'.
*****
Bro: 
Hey wassup. God is good...just thinking how He blessed me with another job right now, ain't God good?

Me:  
You really think God blessed you with a temporary job right now because Big box can't keep stuff on the shelves due to people trying to stock up so they don't get this virus that's killing people? 

Bro: Well...I can witness to more people...
.......we can talk about that later...all the answers are in the Bible if you want to read it. 
**Awkward subject change, conversation peters out...we hang up.
****

I have hit my limit with the irrationality. I want to shake him and make him stop coming around me with all this nonsense. 
I immediately go into analysis mode when he starts talking. It's like I want to fix him with my logic.  At the same time, I'm a bit afraid of pulling back the curtain to see what is underneath all of this self-delusion. What the fuck happened to you that makes your default error message become:""It's all in the Bible?!?!?!""
Is that what true paranoia is?  Would he lose himself if he just accepted the way things are? Does he really need to rationalize at this level? And why can't I seem to let him have this? 

Every time he comes around and does this behavior-and it's a lot- because his pool of friends shrinks when he goes Gaga for Jesus...(srsly...he changes his posts on FB and starts telling his friends he's found God 
to which all his friends reply: Again?) 
I lose my s*** inside. I simply cannot stand how devoted he is to being illogical and sharing it with everyone.

I already know I'll be editing this to add but just needed to let this out.",1.6143245169464675,4.266426578713972,2.6475669147925283,90.42514828159644,85.87361419068736,5.4387234716503015,24.01809471016788,6.946089160319951,1.01182321824517,1821,72,359,25,56,577,226,451,0.09300000000000001,0.77,0.136,0.9498,7,0,0,0,0,0,107.0,1,5,1,5,14,22,2,3,24,0,25,3,0,4,5,56,55,17,1,8,6,8,1,1,3,1,0,1,1,0,24,22,2,3,8,3,2,11,5,7,0,1,4,3,35,15,59,45,9,57,6,2,1,1,57,28,1,4,16,198,59,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415064781562166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051856852434046384,0.07996130774893498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357684267899929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727267018736205,0.0,0.09297018201235092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325205472992578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573227686818222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16133796366091685,0.19706397403769635,0.07995320801009677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346468433140102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849832807552047,0.14573219438935078,0.06853418394303902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18441867591273775,0.0836110219752563,0.17674612614597066,0.0704976573491315,0.0796814673151894,0.0,0.08667634750176463,0.12792021824817942,0.060989074559778776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06743313377478588,0.0,0.06831060527437764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5297078034202896,0.06778004241931213,0.0843662219784691,0.0,0.041908430621439584,0.062159006547772074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595432668290946,0.0,0.037254942914785365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17062243517133435,0.0,0.06483032116822662,0.0,0.0,0.10180325348125902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130860590028062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257806772072232,0.0,0.1585994083351667,0.0,0.07967153172341956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303239071533503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110788888488793,0.07627686763167403,0.0,0.09770338924663953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13024481028006255,0.07253713876473614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060766343667505225,0.06942080927617797,0.2386556413137002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079491064478743,0.0,0.0,0.06375362415599986,0.0,0.0,0.08729514105264556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18387561130603214,0.06665130755871354,0.07020649272088449,0.0,0.0,0.0506612518739804,0.09772382825111317,0.0,0.0,0.08893124377913829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05177297567432257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13493370340750865,0.060528647218519215,0.0,0.0,0.06856351022481541,0.0,0.06880938813211973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05551544482117296,0.0,0.0,0.054170239039289365,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xara666,2020/03/24,"Am I just lazy? I can't handle life, I cant cope. I'm 21 and doing a foundation year because I've failed every year and now I'm about to fail this year/get onto a course with lower entry requirements. I don't have major continuous depression, at least I don't feel like I do but my life periodically falls apart. I struggle to maintain any sort of routine even in terms of showering, sleeping, brushing my teeth, keeping my house clean or even changing my clothes for days. My brain struggles to maintain these routines and then also keep up with university. I literally shut down and ignore everything going on for weeks and ruin my chances of getting good grades, not because I lack the ability but because my mind can't handle ANYTHING. Any routine. Anything difficult that happens my brain just avoids and ignores, when I have a responsibility my body oversleeps into the day. My attendance is abysmal continuously for this reason. I just can't seem to be a functioning adult. When I'm in a good headspace mentally that helps but things always end up becoming too much for me and I fall back into an avoidance pattern where in the past I've used alcohol to mentally check out or thrown myself into a fictional world through tv or movies. I procrastinate in every avenue to the point that procrastination sounds like an understatement, it feels debilitating. I feel like a waste of space and lazy. Am I lazy",5.577938931297709,7.479825152671758,6.138083969465653,74.3881183206107,68.46564885496184,8.90412213740458,32.56564885496183,9.3871,3.166274198473282,1138,51,196,24,20,369,155,262,0.192,0.728,0.08,-0.98,2,2,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,3,13,16,0,4,13,0,14,8,5,2,0,40,27,18,0,1,10,0,3,3,0,0,3,1,2,1,8,14,1,7,5,1,1,4,7,11,0,0,0,5,27,5,32,26,5,40,0,4,0,0,2,20,0,5,19,125,35,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076236225322574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784880409006604,0.1018107794053043,0.0,0.0,0.16641383574225652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20137867921908129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408493746528704,0.0,0.2237629725696574,0.13513363179918492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13591098163495607,0.0,0.2731816312513086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943742303780115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15782021337485322,0.0,0.10538585676926106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083719351178634,0.0,0.0,0.16163121536904734,0.0,0.20618200544191484,0.0,0.1099665318477618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560204224433344,0.17482365080425502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278529065214345,0.0,0.0695382711197262,0.2052543992593908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819984168779978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201328054005884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14118348567739242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21751294797763426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17284865646113806,0.1793322673804771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466140422359641,0.0,0.12354563362288627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994643257552347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680354823920445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566686155172225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580331718317214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138916661663407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244530894640047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25582808928870554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081288516870323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567711430136843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814736019987233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363815813519385
mentalhealth,byrco,2020/03/24,"Fizzy Drinks / Energy Drinks freak me out and make me squirm beer, coke, monster energy

literally any foamy/murky/weird liquid freaks me the hell out

​

the smell of them, the sight of them, even having to pick up and having to move a can (ewwwww) seriously freaks me out makes my body squirm up, I have to wash my hands straight after. to think about drinking one makes me shudder.

​

why the hell is that? been like that all my life, even if someone is sat by me drinking one i get super uncomfortable, even seeing one in the fridge is like weird. even if people TALK about Pepsi or something I get a little uneasy. i have never tried one either

​

same thing with sharing drinks, freaks me out

​

I don't want to seem like an asshole saying this but I'm just being honest because I have no idea why

​

any ideas why?",5.7621548821548805,6.943629962962966,5.0128956228956225,85.35348484848488,67.27160493827161,7.12547699214366,25.83838383838384,6.980632752743323,1.0420296296296292,682,18,128,5,11,204,98,162,0.128,0.763,0.11,0.18899999999999997,0,0,7,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,2,1,7,14,2,0,8,0,12,11,2,4,2,25,23,6,0,3,6,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,7,7,0,4,6,0,1,3,8,0,4,2,5,18,6,19,20,3,12,2,0,2,0,5,9,2,4,5,81,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4106465207416456,0.4605266844565333,0.103093243545285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046206996601070416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419674883206492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3712758751093835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200260827788016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920477748257253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113802181921434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05353980502144808,0.1110962020322518,0.07597154650629351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15179133198733089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080563439223881,0.0,0.0,0.05846165841736264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054562564787628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052550198807479034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060279228677471874,0.0,0.0,0.06040281248305776,0.06900550324493875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422512202878282,0.0583545687018267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060925195316987764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035817382472157,0.04856960051173072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0514632468008488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04470882340814968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20519321967898516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4605266844565333,0.0
mentalhealth,Izm-Atlas,2020/03/24,"I don't know what is happening to me In the last three months, I have undergone weird phases wherein I have symptoms that range from selective mutism, social anxiety, to lack of motivation and energy and erectile dysfunction. I wouldn't say that I am depressed, but more like worse than depression. I feel nothing, no hope, no motivation, no excitement, no love, no passion, no fear, nothing. It scares me, and apparently it is freaking out people around me too, but to soothe them sometimes I fake my emotions, and I am sure that they are aware of it. Sometimes, when I am making love to my boyfriend, I would just turn off or feel like I am acting, a sense of self-consciousness so inevitable and present,  that it brushes off any potential spontaneity or development of situations. 

Before these three months, I was the most energetic and fun person you could meet, I was running my own project with a friend, doing permaculture, handmade craft, I was excited about life, I was very social as well. Now, I turned into the introverted opposite version of everything I was. I force myself to get out and put myself out there sometimes, and it just feels like I wish I was invisible and no one could really see me, so they would not talk to me, because I start having this thing in my throat, I can't speak, fidget in my seat, and end up saying one or two words.",12.582551602986387,8.060519130434784,11.370961791831359,63.6073605621432,57.300395256917,15.038910847606498,45.10715854194114,12.45797560212912,5.331857619675012,1072,43,196,24,9,343,151,253,0.10800000000000001,0.613,0.27899999999999997,0.9946,1,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,3,2,11,20,0,2,5,0,24,6,1,3,1,42,39,19,0,8,8,0,3,3,1,3,2,4,0,1,13,16,0,0,6,0,0,3,11,7,1,5,6,9,38,13,27,28,5,22,0,2,1,3,15,11,0,5,11,148,51,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003281342613514,0.0,0.09003205276604323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476849886196922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717423530540312,0.0,0.10014499325331404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18793078523781895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027313792737965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13238471076036185,0.10423785769051676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577162514446264,0.0,0.0,0.1324332709126888,0.17852185850047725,0.1681546316733318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909265222349249,0.0,0.06148784305090565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407232912952047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689210830315293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467900482725243,0.09593255163565613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312748884015844,0.17249125750309308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21243851880333986,0.0,0.07855857432150927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18787707890995745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258522664034723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15949873800191464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08159099688851781,0.102761826207365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183103318683988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539482976355423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18718263569217514,0.11782759940617607,0.0,0.0937831977271508,0.0,0.1227756893437018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228779293043552,0.0,0.239939001731216,0.0,0.0,0.3491934152707753,0.0,0.08330114816406133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092084686290976,0.122324327186457,0.0,0.09459426480482154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818759390229993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560244978813577,0.11496542229764195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710606306183507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581688560142688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353369776434721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199355316340342,0.1672063162643555,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,djejha,2020/03/24,"The nothingness behind the mask I don't know where to start. I suppose I should give a little bit of background. 

I was a happy kid. Full of life and now I'm just a skinsuit of a man who's spirit watches him from the outside.

I was the black sheep. The redheaded step child. The middle child. I remember all the good times because there were so few. But I don't feel happy or warm looking back at past events. What shrouds the good is the daily physical, emotional, and mental abuse. 

I was never treated like anything I ever did meant anything. And when I'd get upset or emotional(shit I was a sensitive little guy) I'd be beaten to have something to cry about. I was blamed and isolated from my one escape from the family because the dog sneezed on the blanket. And just because I picked my nose. I was blamed. 

My dad's side hated my mother. And my mother's side hated my dad's family. When she wouldn't come over to visit my grandmother they'd either talk shit about her or take their anger and hate out on me. My grandmother on my mom's side had a younger Navy man we were suppose to call Grandpa. And if we didn't we'd be abused. And since my mother firmly had me believing he was just Patrick. It happened often.  

My home life. All I wanted to do was play the computer. If I could do that everything around me just ceased. I was finally at peace. But every glance over to the outside world was a grim reminder. I wasn't important to anyone. My sister had my mom's attention. My stepbrother had my dad's protection. And I had nobodies.  Because my brother was disrespectful towards my mom and my dad did nothing about it. Any free attention from them was focused on arguing or whatever because of my brother. 

Fast forwarding a little bit to the present. I had someone. Someone I loved very much. More than anything. There was nothing I wouldn't do for them. But they used me. Broke me down even more than I thought I already was. And when I finally tried standing up for myself and her wicked ways she pulled the plug on the painful jabs. And took out the fresh blade and went for a mortally wounding stab. 

I admit. I messed up. But I stopped a behavior of mine that made her feel worthless. And when it came to getting therapy and meds. I was slowly slowly fixing myself. 
I felt good. But when I tried to talk to her about it. It was as though I've already said this to her and there was no progress. As sad as I was being so hopeful was the only thing that made me feel alive anymore. And she took that from me 

Graduating. Getting a job a car a house moving on so far in life at the age of 23. 

But thanks to all of the abuse the neglect the nothingness. I felt as though these weren't achievements. These were expected goals that aren't to be celebrated. 

Nothing was good enough. Not for me. And not for my soon to be wife whom I found out was a narcissist later on down the line. 

The end of the relationship was brutal. She would hit me during arguments. Demean me. Strip me of any pride. And when I brought things up (like she were cheating) instead of telling me I'm crazy she got defensive. Stopped seeing me. Didn't completely leave me. Until she put me in the mental hospital. As I sat in the corner derailed from my almost overdose. She comes in. Acts sad. It was clear she was acting. 
And under her breath she mouthed "" why'd you do this.. this makes me feel so ugly"" and she left. I never got to see her again. She broke up with me via text. What was I suppose to do. 

I called her. And when I wanted answers. She's just beat me down. Use my insecurities as weapons against me. Saying I was the problem and she can't wait for it to be fixed. Even had the nerve to tell me she's already fucking someone else. She never loved me. And I gave her as much as I fucking could man... Therapy was giving me a path to self love and happiness. While she steadily stripped it away. 

To this day. I go nights without sleep. And when I do sleep. I have nightmares. And when I'm awake. If I'm doing anything to remotely progress on my own. I still hear her voice telling me I'm not good enough. And nothing I'm doing is working. 

I've got plenty of friends helping me. But to no avail. I don't feel anything anymore. I don't feel connected to anyone. I don't feel real. I just want to be happy. I don't want to take these pills that numb the nothingness. I want to be free. And as days go by. I repress this feeling so much it gives me panic attacks. 

I continue therapy next month. I just. I don't see a point anymore. And I thought maybe finding people who can relate and possibly give advice as to what I should do before the curtain is called. 

I'm sorry if this post goes all over. My mind doesn't exactly have the ability to stay on topic for long. And I appreciate the effort put in for those who read. I just wanted to put my thoughts on paper. Now I'm just posting them.",0.9405581039755332,3.4040879551478085,2.405385575942919,92.37774197247707,86.8797145769623,5.390285423037717,22.446151885830787,6.88968998030894,0.7351831396534148,3808,140,790,52,120,1231,390,981,0.13,0.7609999999999999,0.109,-0.9801,1,0,1,0,4,1,124.0,3,1,6,9,45,52,14,4,50,0,87,18,6,6,10,137,166,77,1,20,29,15,11,2,1,5,7,4,2,8,34,44,0,7,22,2,2,20,28,29,0,1,64,23,151,25,113,84,17,115,1,7,7,5,91,50,3,11,44,550,185,9,0.0,0.17472189661585125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048033693052211134,0.0,0.0,0.04922162792562141,0.0,0.16273128073141746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06685416555779962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462456426440784,0.06874063202657997,0.0,0.2022518665631733,0.04375836777639114,0.0,0.05592090403212106,0.0461827366904892,0.037797157656659607,0.0,0.14982214616905076,0.0,0.04182728103717681,0.05538084764285597,0.0,0.0,0.10732904888549093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057823988179936,0.05622022021926901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468535289879636,0.0515380779423746,0.0,0.0,0.07849252882564299,0.0,0.05399445480733391,0.06340181167190391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041062691606616235,0.055292754256746415,0.043536736352920005,0.1015805013563577,0.0,0.06493282234252848,0.044463507928625225,0.041415204046501015,0.0,0.04417734074319238,0.0,0.09267791082139464,0.0,0.1988339427784349,0.0,0.09439300910949328,0.10769379056667236,0.04492677569480343,0.0,0.0,0.05389591580688269,0.03797702786432064,0.09088600319215533,0.07704436961180604,0.1886158043083825,0.055871833844892936,0.2061443919063161,0.1179412217417805,0.0,0.0,0.0486711740351542,0.043467600498839326,0.20930562848976467,0.0,0.14559114545354765,0.0,0.0,0.05540125280630681,0.0,0.03294755757961963,0.0,0.0493064686972312,0.048822002041148345,0.0,0.056718265542069386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048778748647068264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027014300208411827,0.0,0.0,0.05204804319069329,0.053407046823422163,0.0,0.10415888177765764,0.048029296121262666,0.14779865798623745,0.0,0.04350062451529334,0.04127781651721992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309290869838092,0.09302329119457496,0.03281134142886341,0.0,0.049382800218127916,0.0,0.05460011919573347,0.0,0.09907334888943273,0.0,0.04963253330065751,0.17270921117288354,0.03923504872646531,0.05224398145367499,0.10840373340202837,0.0,0.11373408934120136,0.0,0.05227689574442066,0.04612863376037681,0.0,0.18866217696667015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033308697333505215,0.03738458935764457,0.05230438127597251,0.05767279660183069,0.0,0.0,0.046924005548532426,0.034077884935565836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046467359382945696,0.05541487215410909,0.0941537966689108,0.0,0.0,0.047034692507262256,0.0,0.14824304260954388,0.0,0.0,0.049168297896251566,0.055949146682566314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052774069805976466,0.05568302811139265,0.0,0.0467576574401081,0.039090025641980865,0.0,0.0,0.11751050273605705,0.0,0.05127938098435278,0.0,0.1009137937403954,0.0406615205260241,0.0,0.09838099001283897,0.0,0.12494660542509935,0.037841917305979834,0.0,0.055024993482318096,0.034792159066448336,0.052392685302482665,0.03925524318691979,0.08219155510172503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391687893841405,0.07901784742225162,0.12889089891759062,0.045255316002489436,0.16863906498606088,0.0,0.06531279013619437,0.0,0.09658906771049372,0.11707072813069826,0.028662673377800825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922601808635836,0.06674603113548466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490826815766059,0.0,0.04055801950904599,0.17395734070836116,0.03901694773398702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04556717362159931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04738366190533371,0.0,0.035785422416545073,0.0,0.0,0.03491829873056996,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raylynnrhoton,2020/03/24,Trauma by dreams? I have had traumatic dreams and experienced trauma because of it? I feel like that's not valid because it was a dream not an actual event. But maybe it is I don't know. It contained rape. Is this possible?,1.076666666666668,3.6839709090909127,2.824545454545458,87.87348484848488,89.9090909090909,6.56969696969697,20.96969696969697,7.793537801064563,1.277724242424243,176,6,35,4,6,58,34,44,0.267,0.551,0.182,-0.7677,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,7,8,2,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,2,3,1,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.39754269979539897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4966683659301196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20598283526576244,0.29103131756033895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22388459724302792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19902458207351034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092665089331391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4592581054397773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OrdinaryEngine6,2020/03/24,"Does a therapist works? what is your experience? Hello, I am suffering from depressive moods, anxiety, intrusive thoughts etc etc.. lots of shit that i myself don't know what's going on.

I am tired i am barely holding myself and my fragmented sanity together, I want help.

I refuse to take medications, i had experience with it and they just make me docile.

I am skeptical about the extent that a therapist can help you, can someone share his experience and how it helped him/her with his mental health overall?",3.832580645161293,6.75001919354839,5.166032258064514,74.58904838709677,77.49462365591398,9.741505376344088,27.57956989247312,9.888512548439397,3.537594408602152,407,17,69,14,10,135,68,93,0.196,0.713,0.092,-0.8762,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,1,3,6,2,0,3,0,9,4,1,2,0,14,15,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,2,0,17,1,7,13,4,2,0,2,0,0,11,1,1,1,0,50,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12887535638832692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509876178710085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742496257646173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3757662831207917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4943736425224263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574261049449488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17907054574519402,0.0,0.0,0.33875585836481065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258402470967904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322302142960422,0.0,0.0,0.11245177636182783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16971088588917627,0.16977321845993418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729270257072763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273995025871278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12666480518280307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3912019796536628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13374248826747484,0.0,0.1936258742678637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936509309464372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264461443380445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aflopstudent_hey901,2020/03/24,"Is my counsellor crossing a line Hi everyone I’ve had a really weird feeling about my counsellor. She’s sort of similar to my age maybe about 6 years older, and sometimes I feel like she gets overly emotional with me? It’s hard to explain but for example I told her that I didn’t have a coping mechanism and she said “part of me wants to take care of you”?? There was some awkward silence and I acted like she didn’t say that. Is this normal? ? I’m a 24F but I’m pretty sure she’s either gay or bi",-0.18571428571428328,2.093671904761909,2.394047619047619,91.25678571428571,91.85714285714286,6.047619047619048,19.88095238095238,7.447530270364453,0.8430952380952381,390,13,84,8,14,134,72,105,0.045,0.759,0.196,0.9486,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,1,4,0,7,2,0,0,1,16,18,6,0,2,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,6,5,16,4,11,12,3,6,0,0,0,2,12,1,0,3,5,52,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471859787624973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727148408958031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316639097986632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451721197397667,0.1732007546766336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12666604201000115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21718058888615632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368900234057233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24356577431359905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375418786643035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262541274588798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466508748855635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553146801110075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23061804898032734,0.1927997667481896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397815330296815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284989024072669,0.0,0.1822863605744904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316639097986632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299868982727626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561248267171539
mentalhealth,itschrisxD,2020/03/24,"Extreme Loneliness and Bad Thoughts For years ive been a recluse so rarely ever go outside. im 25 dont even have a Job or a girlfriend let alone any friends what so ever and until recently with me and everyone under lockdown stuck at home i feel my depression is sky high at the moment ive been sitting here for the past 2 to 3 weeks thinking to myself how much of a failure i am. in general i was feel like im a bad person because i push people away and get angry at everyone around me. all i just wanna do is sleep , eat , play my video games and repeat. life is such a mess :(",1.5656184798807755,3.3158564262295123,3.5338152011922515,89.48100596125187,79.0,6.403576751117736,25.02533532041729,7.348242739294969,1.1384163934426232,452,17,97,6,11,153,87,122,0.228,0.71,0.062,-0.9661,1,2,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,0,8,0,13,3,1,1,3,19,20,10,0,1,2,0,2,1,2,0,1,0,1,1,1,7,1,0,4,3,0,2,1,4,0,0,5,2,12,3,15,14,2,21,0,1,0,0,4,9,0,1,10,64,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727416253924136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342126920332175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14847630121635674,0.0,0.0,0.1567024153847057,0.0,0.2785213138934863,0.1016721565902594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14365389244872634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19547379368640305,0.0,0.0,0.17066532600367426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11016161912418287,0.3017378175567265,0.0,0.3187453475400918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866561688765022,0.11915307565945332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885966536272575,0.0,0.08713962312276981,0.0,0.09478922150222764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762202284176268,0.16730153500274667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.360318400014388,0.0,0.1655109307113275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705515938575528,0.11780699548488988,0.08148398352689103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260805716692436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921761107965368,0.11562950278139257,0.14563247567009044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164682607187031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669080252462099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068707423550794,0.0,0.13241070281213702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378693079422144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740572883114442
mentalhealth,awanderingdude,2020/03/24,"Do psychologists ask clients to show ID and do they accept cash payment, generally speaking? Thinking about seeing one, appreciate the help!",8.690454545454546,12.245028045454545,8.009090909090908,57.23363636363638,64.0,9.854545454545457,42.81818181818181,10.125756701596842,5.648745454545455,115,7,14,3,2,36,21,22,0.0,0.696,0.304,0.807,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5559161564312445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3985804126704856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029492716302912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4738579337832925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810268031745063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yinquee,2020/03/24,"Need clarity So I’m having trouble wrapping my head around a situation I was put in 6 years ago. During a party I had drank 2 shots and felt like I was absolutely obliterated (was my first time drinking). I had trouble standing and felt really relaxed and overly friendly in conversation with other individuals (not normal for me). Maybe an hour later I blacked out, the rest of the night I was in and out of a black out... 
this girl from my school put a photo of me passed out under a table on Snapchat (which I don’t remember) and at some point in the night a guy (who I liked) walked into a bedroom with me. 

I was pretty young at the time (early high-school) and had never kissed a guy and was extremely insecure about my body. Being super naive I assumed he didn’t have bad intentions, especially since there were people in the other room etc. I Laid down on the bed and the next thing I noticed was his body on top of mine forcing me to kiss him. I didn’t know what to do, since this was someone I had liked at the time, so I sort of kissed back. Then I tried to stop it and he continued to lift my shirt. I remember pulling it back down and lightly saying “stoop” but I felt guilty for even saying that (I don’t know why). 

Then people kept knocking on the door and he would open the door and I distinctly remember a guy saying “dude drink this so you’re not sober that’s fucked up” or something like that. It made so uncomfortable that when he opened the door my shirt was pulled down. I felt like my privacy was completely invaded. After that I don’t remember much but I’m almost certain sex was not involved. But sometimes I have flashes of my pants being unzipped. I tried saying weird shit like “you remind me of my uncle” to turn him off... it didn’t work. 
After that he told people that he had fingered me... I thought he lied... but what if that did happen. I’m not sure how to deal with this, I’ve suppressed the experience for so long but it’s coming out now more than ever ... 6 years later! 

I recently started counselling and it’s made feel like I should talk about this experience but I see no value in it... I’ve quit counselling since starting to get these reminders (or flashbacks) because I think it’s been sort of a catalyst. I’ve dealt with depression for years and a lot of negative emotions after this event... but all of the sudden after beginning counselling all of it is coming back to haunt me after I thought I’ve gotten over it...

Has anyone experienced this... or has advice",3.8993710073710055,5.257577311111113,4.836456456456457,84.21594594594599,71.84848484848484,7.694785694785695,26.307671307671303,8.186683628785799,1.5828547638547636,1959,64,392,29,37,638,235,495,0.10400000000000001,0.81,0.087,-0.8896,0,0,3,0,0,0,66.0,0,1,0,5,17,23,2,1,25,0,36,15,7,4,7,82,66,34,0,5,15,0,6,7,1,2,0,4,6,4,33,29,3,3,15,3,0,8,13,8,0,1,34,15,51,15,64,28,8,81,0,1,3,5,26,33,2,10,46,266,84,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492310739837625,0.06796520743634027,0.0,0.07677605199720297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05361092837856065,0.0,0.0,0.0682544414172893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17686838066261745,0.06401801683794622,0.04673861214825866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17033087961899995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320924831536317,0.08038925811066004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904558811336232,0.06603758381763225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15021897464195547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624581418354083,0.0,0.0,0.08550968013717199,0.05064121154249869,0.06935432127244255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000008937914636,0.0,0.0,0.03876772714789602,0.054774577192875686,0.2944690324551641,0.0,0.0,0.06521726532422811,0.0,0.0,0.05923668901029135,0.07088213861438207,0.04005801769597518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22775235679737454,0.06780090169174148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868771408628847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100830340288148,0.0,0.0,0.07550659287472088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427398299800924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262206871680179,0.0,0.0,0.06785241265777983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518389382364008,0.0,0.14509802586167664,0.0,0.0,0.07702744905234887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636282953326685,0.056851404791324237,0.05913426492319985,0.0,0.08154166847124507,0.14390317969565253,0.07512239766928651,0.0,0.08729171575564483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594643803566157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247993515266728,0.0,0.0,0.07800310923201928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15415331332007787,0.0,0.08155023640270438,0.0,0.0,0.04911812278653361,0.0,0.0757044678013261,0.0,0.3474182583397784,0.0,0.0,0.24389098595404335,0.0,0.15519255568262197,0.06109775213661545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870282843098185,0.1902719076404024,0.08618267428541446,0.0,0.0,0.0649640376887929,0.05902594313109736,0.07583068627432632,0.0,0.10853784103268753,0.0,0.0,0.06410132470381259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226256485868955,0.0,0.0,0.0616261450308508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05093754902983087,0.049128398024057225,0.0,0.1217381963865556,0.13412438765484613,0.0,0.0,0.07326349549550877,0.0,0.10411067193487596,0.08339724860932107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918466188737568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055818215853124915,0.0,0.0,0.054465673566164566,0.0,0.0,0.1481229926863036
mentalhealth,diorede,2020/03/24,"How to take a break during employment Hi all,

Not sure if this is the right sub (please redirect if necessary), but I need advice.

I have a full-time job that is badly affecting my mental health, and I don’t know what to do. I need a break. 

I have been breaking down crying in the bathrooms and I don’t know how to cope. 

This is my first grad job in admin role, and some of it is super repetitive and almost menial.

The management is terrible and the whole thing is incredibly depressing.

I am genuinely losing it.
I need a break but I cannot take it without badly affecting my future, right?

But in general, I am just feeling so terrible. Shaking and crying every other night. Any advice?",2.1965396825396795,4.606735029629629,4.166269841269841,82.36750000000002,80.18518518518519,7.708994708994709,22.97619047619048,8.634040054169528,1.8835079365079368,539,18,101,13,14,183,78,135,0.26,0.693,0.047,-0.9859,3,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,4,9,0,1,8,0,15,1,0,4,2,29,23,14,0,5,8,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,7,0,1,1,1,13,2,9,22,3,15,0,2,0,0,2,6,0,4,4,74,22,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31060015915137795,0.0,0.0,0.15914084984856436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807473433082856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653921721732089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34914421920922434,0.0,0.0,0.13688223003530656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390151944123588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035746674286136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351818797465006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689302881247646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154179104345805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17468250744275368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177796891697907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16015944214027733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35352355213207715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14914073931224747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17445238505066224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714428780051694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14978532608407386,0.0,0.23898427232410865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558298624296956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743455414555814,0.0,0.1531984321190379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Uhhh_Screeee,2020/03/24,"I never realized how much of my mental health is tied up with my friends (I'm sorry if this doesn't go here, I wasn't sure)

So, as y'all know, it's Corona times and everybody's stuck at home until further notice. We can't interact with other human beings, can't go to school, etc. It sucks.
 Online school for my district doesn't even start until April, so I can't see my bois till then, if they're even vc classes. Personally, I've been out of school since the 13th, and haven't seen them since then. 
As for the part pertaining to my mental health, I've been staying up till morning, sleeping till the afternoon, and eating next to nothing. I just... don't have any motivation to do anything, at all. I dyed my hair --I think I got some happy brain chemicals from that-- but that's temporary happiness and I doubt it'll do me any good. 
I'm an introvert at my core so I guess I thought maybe socializing with people-- even the ones I care about-- was tiring, but apparently I barely function without my bois to talk to. Normally, I'm a tired  barely-motivated person, but this just sucks. 

TL;DR: corona is keeping from my best bois and my mental health is suffering as a result",3.1191025641025623,5.0138796709401765,4.353341880341883,84.69026923076925,74.94017094017093,7.4150427350427375,24.94786324786325,8.238735603445708,1.5512827350427347,929,31,184,16,20,305,135,234,0.08900000000000001,0.8109999999999999,0.10099999999999999,0.7803,1,1,0,0,0,0,42.0,1,1,1,2,11,11,2,1,7,0,19,9,3,3,3,33,37,24,0,3,8,0,1,0,1,1,5,0,1,3,8,10,1,1,5,0,0,2,10,4,0,1,8,3,26,7,31,27,6,23,0,1,2,0,10,7,2,5,13,120,34,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15132343607225546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155883450196192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676220761053008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242047661734022,0.0,0.0,0.11343863845637965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384841542802662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408611880569287,0.22046175527190576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08596045287966844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646508720174962,0.09332096945648004,0.08898608276495969,0.0,0.12256721997830568,0.0,0.0,0.2368801302661611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547977029135788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160447821913852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889444147288376,0.0,0.0,0.06114647750842212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177725351184227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363766367895065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179009382879991,0.0,0.08581182166716697,0.0,0.1183279968455741,0.0,0.1090127661243276,0.10675852670237147,0.12667209366976762,0.0,0.0,0.0753937542940245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048549386602295,0.0,0.07713479929783001,0.1942987129036801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3378081032106727,0.08866110735326127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184073526326518,0.0,0.1113419734486252,0.11341721175160435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245482762984902,0.07875154845445836,0.11859008483427365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486276166482207,0.0,0.0,0.08942787695577872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129195459703827,0.0,0.0883292995353292,0.06487754631827218,0.255757733649934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725223287697748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tgif55,2020/03/24,"Counselling not working So I’m having trouble wrapping my head around a situation I was put in 6 years ago. During a party I had drank 2 shots and felt like I was absolutely obliterated (was my first time drinking). I had trouble standing and felt really relaxed and overly friendly in conversation with other individuals (not normal for me). Maybe an hour later I blacked out, the rest of the night I was in and out of a black out... 
this girl from my school put a photo of me passed out under a table on Snapchat (which I don’t remember) and at some point in the night a guy (who I liked) walked into a bedroom with me. 

I was pretty young at the time (early high-school) and had never kissed a guy and was extremely insecure about my body. Being super naive I assumed he didn’t have bad intentions, especially since there were people in the other room etc. I Laid down on the bed and the next thing I noticed was his body on top of mine forcing me to kiss him. I didn’t know what to do, since this was someone I had liked at the time, so I sort of kissed back. Then I tried to stop it and he continued to lift my shirt. I remember pulling it back down and lightly saying “stoop” but I felt guilty for even saying that (I don’t know why). 
Then people kept knocking on the door and he would open the door and I distinctly remember a guy saying “dude drink this so you’re not sober that’s fucked up” or something like that. It made so uncomfortable that when he opened the door my shirt was pulled down. I felt like my privacy was completely invaded. After that I don’t remember much but I’m almost certain sex was not involved. But sometimes I have flashes of my pants being unzipped. I tried saying weird shit like “you remind me of my uncle” to turn him off... it didn’t work. 
After that he told people that he had fingered me... I thought he lied... but what if that did happen. I’m not sure how to deal with this, I’ve suppressed the experience for so long but it’s coming out now more than ever ... 6 years later! 

I recently started counselling and it’s made feel like I should talk about this experience but I see no value in it... I’ve quit counselling since starting to get these reminders (or flashbacks) because I think it’s been sort of a catalyst

Has anyone experienced this... or has advice",3.7029670329670346,5.1842003956044005,4.625494505494507,85.05450549450552,72.51648351648352,7.397802197802199,25.967032967032967,7.957251820313856,1.441984615384616,1800,59,362,25,35,584,221,455,0.084,0.8240000000000001,0.092,0.5913,0,0,3,0,0,0,59.0,0,1,0,6,16,22,2,1,23,0,35,15,7,4,5,74,60,32,0,4,15,0,6,7,1,2,0,4,6,4,30,26,3,3,14,3,0,7,13,7,0,1,32,15,49,15,54,24,5,71,0,0,3,5,26,32,2,9,38,242,79,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774299480922375,0.0702392448285992,0.0,0.07934489007858728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554046881619138,0.0,0.0,0.07053815624470364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12185746168665867,0.06615998578881138,0.04830243216288863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17602995424733472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825607258637352,0.08307898989807233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816903622535906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552451281438419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883707353353653,0.05233560802830064,0.07167483681027853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550189192327866,0.0,0.0,0.040064850550775084,0.05660727132241896,0.3043216263914448,0.0,0.0,0.06739935974521663,0.0,0.0,0.06121868025087114,0.07325377315700246,0.04139831273128041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235372687773594,0.07006944160343535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132051417464546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371874773124101,0.0,0.0,0.07803295631913489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709369319622451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.270980010955395,0.0,0.0,0.07012267606694103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995283832820902,0.0,0.0,0.07960469858902433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058248664752885884,0.0,0.06111282917204815,0.0,0.08426995857915763,0.14871801398861598,0.07763590638558243,0.0,0.09021239580872496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479987446224315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749050301232086,0.0,0.0,0.08061300323215476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15931110525294004,0.0,0.08427881318371405,0.0,0.0,0.0507615584805799,0.0,0.078237451912388,0.0,0.35904247225773217,0.0,0.0,0.25205129683389865,0.0,0.1603851194653937,0.06314201240127759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133613422786662,0.19663818604948372,0.08906624709100723,0.0,0.0,0.06713765940538671,0.061000883057811886,0.07836789350980768,0.0,0.11216939191428484,0.0,0.0,0.06624608103971187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468038687009314,0.0,0.0,0.06368808471185873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05264186062591263,0.050772177515690915,0.0,0.06290570796091874,0.13861203485325468,0.0,0.0,0.07571480749070028,0.0,0.1075940948485022,0.08618762428685789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149950081801594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115371657855249,0.0,0.0,0.056288032136908826,0.0,0.0,0.10205267803415498
mentalhealth,deepsigh8,2020/03/24,"What fun. 😒 Waking up in the middle of the night and crying for hours at a time is THE BEST. 

I’m thoroughly enjoying every second of this.

Man, I honestly hope the people I love keep shitting on me with their selfish actions. Truly the best way to live life, constantly getting played. 

And I get to have a nice assortment of mental health issues to make dealing with it worse!? How blessed am I!? 

(Thanks for letting me vent sarcastically).",3.3352108433734955,5.787754493975908,4.379141566265062,82.14533885542173,76.34939759036145,7.041566265060243,26.037650602409638,8.07648339933343,1.8472903614457832,345,13,62,6,8,112,65,83,0.08199999999999999,0.563,0.35600000000000004,0.9851,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,2,1,13,1,0,7,0,4,5,2,2,0,8,12,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,7,11,14,11,2,11,1,0,0,1,4,5,1,1,4,41,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4242008458174764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21840751003451747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22200671922132945,0.0,0.20836500983337464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028514518859006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21118672022926965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148319060165729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20073936365591727,0.19903618079560148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21094878571004785,0.0,0.17964333913322178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206669655237695,0.14275522491912893,0.0,0.0,0.1784655261898853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18241083037869124,0.0,0.13490900667235636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20367785199143812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18966515505796952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140116600112783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20746149167006786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18607437131993332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178511034776444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16042433600563008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059658487595332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayuser-,2020/03/24,"Does anyone else get really loud/quiet thoughts? I used to have horrible nightmares where I was all tiny and everyone was just yelling at me so so so loud and it felt like I was an actual hell. Occasionally my thoughts will get really big and loud kinda? And fill up every inch of my brain and it's absolutely unbearable. Sometimes it's really quiet too, like if my head was a room thoughts were being whispered to me from the opposite side and it would make me want to tear my ears out. Same thing with nightmares about things going super slow or super fast/my thoughts going super slow and super fast

It happened way more when I was younger but I have no clue what it is. Does this happened to anyone else and if it does, do you know why? This has happened to me my whole life and I can't find anything online about this",2.9011247443762787,5.06798958282209,3.7056687116564433,87.84950511247446,76.4846625766871,6.800654396728017,23.136605316973416,7.793537801064563,1.092397464212679,654,20,131,10,15,208,97,163,0.048,0.861,0.091,0.6298,0,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,1,0,4,9,7,1,0,3,0,15,4,3,2,1,30,31,17,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,2,1,6,1,0,13,11,0,0,7,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,11,7,16,6,13,17,4,16,1,0,0,0,1,8,1,4,6,85,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.13089440800282545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875777514961675,0.27487011194580996,0.11037998705380964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973673001427093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35214193920162745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241017324068628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301279350753952,0.128169779627365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128788664605743,0.0,0.12259508413517815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015785803496006,0.0,0.15246169049682382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3558399678964211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765910165232229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371596015260627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09474206771260328,0.13106116581655006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953478412039352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577870028183051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13266091500327154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822394057929555,0.0,0.0,0.4259463105757552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158478003103692,0.0,0.0,0.07911508779288366,0.1064684904752526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103412221496157,0.1497546458952208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952841975531901,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,esterreed,2020/03/24,"Is it a mental health problem, should I visit a doctor or it’s not harming my life so it’s alright? For years now I have noticed I am always very fidgety. Some examples of that being , I can never stand at a place (my boss is office and friends in undergrad would always point that out asking me if I was anxious, and even if I was feeling completely normal mentally apparently I do that subconsciously ), even while working or reading or studying I have to keep on moving my hands (when I was in school, I used to pluck my hair at times when studying), even when I am lying down in bed, I have noticed myself moving my feet and like tensing and relaxing them continuously, my friends always laugh that I have way too much energy which I realise that I do, and when I am not properly (100%) concentrating on things , my mind is running all the time, like literally just imagining things , making up scenarios , just something.

Lately I have been thinking that I might have a problem. But when I spoke to my mom , she said if it’s not harming you how does it matter. I am confused, what should I do?",10.887689573459715,6.959073094786731,10.522790284360193,66.59612855450239,59.75829383886256,13.204028436018955,42.962677725118475,10.686352973137794,4.506084834123222,857,35,159,14,8,283,122,211,0.083,0.7709999999999999,0.146,0.9079999999999999,1,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,1,1,14,12,0,1,5,1,26,6,3,4,2,39,34,20,0,9,12,1,3,2,2,4,3,2,1,0,15,6,0,1,3,2,0,4,4,5,0,0,6,5,34,7,15,23,3,31,0,0,0,0,10,12,0,9,15,129,49,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262435001202307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764695927949034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218119782935676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703011661555073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377079247978754,0.11437115353570294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25896635768185444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608278639272079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20194763812412767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13892155387540644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616678489939275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742846456654196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231299967179288,0.127700921555869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723922431366184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634175175681105,0.1386456241132266,0.13196362956567298,0.15306717086643964,0.0,0.27781396423290466,0.09607508870270068,0.0,0.1007992287632074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280523188669291,0.0,0.297591849226964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654735756970554,0.0,0.12354802369970527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501129128817395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072931439245408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431987197605565,0.0,0.0,0.1322692515322209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006145853400354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365450180071942,0.08374340388991655,0.0,0.0,0.15241738273068878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11287760770083355,0.0,0.10783619344971417,0.0,0.10373877163112444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951467497945652,0.0,0.0,0.09284122998177488,0.0,0.0,0.08416261674044491
mentalhealth,vctrgnzlz,2020/03/24,"/sigh Nothing special just heart broken and want to write about it.

I consider myself a catch, I’m a pretty handsome guy, muscular, smart, funny, have a pretty awesome job and most girls consider me the nice guy. But it’s really hard for me to let my guard down and let someone in. I’ve been let down so many times, I honestly don’t want to fall in love. But she got in so easily I didn’t even know I loved her till it was too late. 

We never officially made it a relationship, but! She told me she loved multiple times, and she (jokingly) asked me to marry her. Really thought this girl loved me for real for real.

Not a month later, she’s always on her phone, hiding it and kinda panics when I ask to see it. Can’t prove anything but she’s not the same around me, doesn’t reply, doesn’t wanna hang out. One night I ask her if she still loves me, she says she doesn’t feel the same way anymore.

Point is.. Some girls suck man

Any outlandish tips on emotionally letting her go? 

Google does a pretty good job on basic suggestions, wondering if there’s anything you guys do after a breakup the I probably don’t know about.",2.773828598043785,4.502696690265488,4.086115510013972,86.95299254774103,75.46017699115043,7.412761993479274,22.514205868653946,8.20500826718156,1.1420743362831858,876,24,182,15,19,288,132,226,0.063,0.728,0.209,0.9863,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,1,1,0,0,11,15,1,1,11,0,16,7,2,1,2,37,38,15,0,5,9,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,7,7,8,0,1,6,1,0,4,10,2,1,1,7,4,32,12,23,27,4,27,0,0,1,5,37,11,1,6,11,116,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032641210349285,0.0,0.0,0.06564838432451403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957386382132864,0.0,0.0,0.15888324272042895,0.08593828436058648,0.2707468354180286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448006849124994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859098910357462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376169444119825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488119438159462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054864129864784505,0.08097054927420436,0.07720935649515237,0.0,0.0,0.2867600466112473,0.0,0.0,0.08647807682111172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439665982438052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19159590199554954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610828196225792,0.0,0.10889779808204264,0.0,0.0,0.3948619746318671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4356414866198472,0.09134552380573653,0.0,0.09787323759908044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770548113582888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07445518810057869,0.0,0.0,0.09059331612920483,0.0,0.0926297336723133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541588383175193,0.0,0.0,0.11326522094163792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125854886871863,0.0,0.0,0.2946381177398281,0.10408307726406704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21976019315476805,0.1236879861774999,0.0,0.0,0.10364447415011616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676999645986841,0.0,0.0,0.07692738945452812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817953795853226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709447182492031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663949423196546,0.11258285445487004,0.0,0.0,0.09224511956153417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387989826921202,0.07662647670909199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469012125017953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway5645646464,2020/03/24,"I need some help I made a throwaway account because i dont really want people to know about whos behind all of this.

I feel lonely usually at night a lot of self anger and suicidal thoughts keeps me awake, started drinking a lot more and distancing myself from family and friends. I havent been in  a relationship for almost 2 years now (Still love my ex she was the first girl I had actual feelings for and the girl i wanted to have a family with we broke up bcs she cheated), I would like to be in a relationship again I just dont try anymore (got cheated on multiple times by multiple partners at a very young age 15-17) Pretty much the only thing i want in life is to feel loved again (Also having strong feeling about wanting children) I dont know what to do I dont know how to beat this or whats wrong with me I just need some insight and any kind of help thanks.",3.505229909755052,4.5843532402234635,4.744245810055869,85.57319724967772,72.46368715083798,7.965792866351527,26.618392780403948,8.384062270229773,1.652243317576279,686,23,144,11,13,227,113,179,0.12300000000000001,0.7140000000000001,0.162,0.8032,0,2,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,3,10,13,3,0,10,0,14,4,0,2,1,36,36,8,1,7,3,1,4,1,2,1,1,0,0,5,5,8,1,1,9,1,1,0,5,6,0,1,6,4,20,7,25,28,7,19,0,2,0,2,17,7,0,6,13,96,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.1107922358830964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368731549592688,0.0,0.0,0.09079263114966968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720661559052386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259464058026016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692089161518024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5322412684384066,0.11121952431349813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140583993478767,0.0,0.22962362417298715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657146500535356,0.0,0.0,0.08771563498332056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080304364302534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15219811010861214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091371601145396,0.0,0.11822758098077205,0.1871849875832784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019200876664227,0.05546669189239691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19304409928895908,0.20493667979081293,0.10742806262409496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346012352426109,0.16836717764892078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654341923913144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634727830234702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870977493791731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115504299299564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273241299257945,0.0,0.0,0.2437847985484064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844011281409375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803595356608037,0.0,0.09066793206848901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418712905461472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452631505844147,0.0,0.0,0.07542655628287052,0.0,0.0,0.0901328498957439,0.06620224743851982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708173641947869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250410170077834,0.09367695775488018,0.2678597994338105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065088075433076,0.1241309667918339,0.0,0.07311179707591697
mentalhealth,accidentallyhappied,2020/03/24,"I just want someone to listen No one is replying to me and i just want one fucking person to hear me. I'm in pain. I will kill myself. I don't care about anything anymore, i fucking hate myself and living. No advice. I don't care about what you have to say, just listen. 

I hate that i look how i look. I wish i was pretty, and physically fit and had muscles. But i don't. I don't give a fuck about working out and i know I'll never accomplish my goals even if i did. I fucking hate every single thing about my physical appearance. From my hair, to face, to body. 

I hate my jobs. Fucking hell. I'm sick of stupid, abusive customers, stupid co workers and managers. I'm fucking embarrassed to admit i still work at burger king and I'm a fucking 20 year old. Fuck getting a new job and being the new girl. Fuck interviews,  fuck applying.

I will never accomplish what i want. One part of me wants to be an environmentalist, another part of me wants to be a AFL player and the other part of me wants to join the millitary. But fuck, I'm too lazy, unfit and stupid to accomplish any of this so I'll probably work minimum wage fast food jobs until i die. 

I hate the fact that I'm a lesbian, the possibility for love is never going to happen, and i cannot ever have our own biological kids, everyone will hate me (which i agree with, i have lesbians too), i fucking hate every single thing about it. 

I want to fucking end everything. I'm going to kill myself, i don't give a fuck.",1.1742545681063137,3.401045116279072,3.5242846760797377,86.54878581810631,82.88704318936877,6.287416943521595,22.363060631229235,7.531066641456977,1.0466618770764131,1144,39,235,19,32,394,142,301,0.312,0.616,0.07200000000000001,-0.9979,4,0,0,0,0,2,43.0,1,1,0,9,15,32,27,1,12,0,20,23,3,1,5,36,73,17,3,9,6,0,1,0,0,3,2,4,0,3,10,13,1,0,2,0,1,3,11,29,0,3,3,7,43,3,31,64,6,19,1,0,2,17,14,4,15,2,12,154,53,15,0.0,0.06636860029277171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05473719728060693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03809211218872939,0.05873659820375405,0.0,0.0,0.055551815709421526,0.0,0.0,0.04609556174831654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062220023197319826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11422202547803195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058134713174592186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049612652604354636,0.0,0.0,0.03699737081100795,0.05066876291672007,0.0943900853863479,0.05352472081919325,0.05034265870342863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677335449688108,0.0,0.0,0.7249893438252111,0.029265518922432687,0.10746935988709104,0.06366921627851839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04953386826270796,0.0,0.0,0.3871224218686548,0.0,0.0,0.06313296171408997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16675869487445993,0.0,0.12394456823735643,0.0,0.03078437209269112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04946226001371581,0.0,0.0940769631666601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05055571299472622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129606634223036,0.1081992475403024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05877830641924335,0.0,0.11387161518825832,0.0,0.059603895820190315,0.0,0.0,0.1819763178230059,0.0,0.0,0.04891012629741424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314848175596299,0.0,0.05698737981903702,0.06039363035185225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0445453661650235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04746131695004025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04473364120233345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442773710415716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23127363558774214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441447095242586,0.0,0.0,0.12233873363360592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03607181528725459
mentalhealth,deeceefee,2020/03/24,"I’m very lonely. I’m single, my friends don’t live in close proximity to me at all, I actually dislike my living situation at university and this virus going around doesn’t make dealing with it any easier because I’m stuck in the house. I think I form sexual bonds with people because I crave human connection, which has only put me in a bad place of feeling even more lonely. Dude isn’t that great to me and I’m really deciding to let him go. I just went through a friend breakup and she was the only person I felt I could be close to but she moved on from me because of a guy. I want to move from loneliness to solitude. Being lonely ignites my depression and I don’t want to go there again. Plus I want to form healthy bonds with others and not just start friendships or relationships because I’m feeling sorry for myself. I want some real help and real advice. I don’t want to feel alone anymore.",2.8840953038674044,4.875752281767959,4.468283839779005,83.17601691988949,75.9060773480663,7.1769337016574575,25.124654696132595,8.07648339933343,1.5795439226519332,717,25,139,12,16,240,109,181,0.153,0.708,0.139,-0.7621,0,7,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,5,0,11,0,0,2,1,36,33,9,0,6,5,0,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,5,13,0,0,6,0,0,7,6,5,0,0,4,4,23,3,26,25,6,19,0,4,0,0,11,10,0,2,2,90,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.12350433139587695,0.0,0.0,0.12367299518305973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107802110704636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860651593664692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255135406626967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266525772535953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056723374529971,0.3085992749521097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104788454229692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047783223948134,0.10900596717049582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359170526468954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19197765946866585,0.0,0.12151747470493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19555992827892074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157809424664906,0.0,0.0,0.13953287831170394,0.0,0.12531432603903025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848305193899787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603328071300467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294162039329897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22350964785647845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447980183557335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690265626522249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19250920950521466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774078842749093,0.11050733531301997,0.13222829294291905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722778484291652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881060400934883,0.0810775950666397,0.0,0.0,0.1358781069323701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422587747874731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14167359037935476,0.08957983963373478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109455604763594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442527802150303,0.3732419195851088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732241444946075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bumblb0,2020/03/24,"there are terrible people in the world but i hate you, because i’m selfish not sure where to leave this. i’ve tried my hardest to forgive because i’ve always believed that hate is a waste of my time, but recently i’ve learned that some people just don’t deserve my forgiveness. i know that there are vicious people in the world that i could choose to hate for selfless reasons, but i’ve chosen to hate you instead because I’m not the selfless person i want to be. i’m selfish, and this time that’s okay, because it was as if you only blinked and my whole world came crashing down, and then you give me a shitty apology that meant nothing to you, which i ACCEPTED- not only accepted, but believed* even after it felt like you took my whole world away. i wanted to see the good in you but im starting to doubt there was any to begin with, because you still have the audacity and apathy to pop back in whenever you feel like it, because for some reason you’re narcissistic enough to believe that i’m trying to “ruin your happiness”. you took my whole recovery and stomped on it, and when it gets bad i struggle to argue the thoughts in my head which i worked so hard to get out, but yeah. ig i’m ruining your happiness. and still, you continue to break down the ruins that i keep trying so hard to rebuild out of respect for myself; respect for myself that i almost completely lost because i was naive. how can i take back all you took from me? how do i learn to love myself again? or even trust myself? how can i be happy being alone again, without being scared of the thoughts in my own head? i want to appreciate myself again. i want to feel safe around myself again and i feel like i need to have my own back in order to do that, but i can’t figure out how. i’ve just been knocked down so many times it feels like i’ve forgotten how to stand up again. i know i’ll be okay, but right now i’m alone and i hate it.",3.4699071618037145,4.689310448717952,4.389699381078692,87.54346153846157,72.71794871794873,7.225464190981432,26.525198938992038,7.6298220110432995,1.3299363395225463,1505,51,314,18,29,487,171,390,0.21,0.617,0.17300000000000001,-0.9606,0,2,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,14,0,2,30,38,7,3,10,3,21,3,2,7,2,70,61,30,0,7,16,0,7,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,21,15,0,2,20,0,0,4,6,18,0,0,13,8,52,20,51,42,9,51,0,4,1,1,21,23,0,6,25,216,73,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543560304635158,0.1560455415563951,0.0,0.0,0.06268349412550789,0.0,0.0,0.0512293529039102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706277302579544,0.0,0.0,0.07077828871979425,0.1737803990703023,0.06290031305826843,0.3214581514503129,0.0,0.0,0.2546251200063828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616143744875343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898572544792187,0.0,0.0,0.060147657606356576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783962762412876,0.0,0.09951411233923356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15236349356669146,0.16145476960591995,0.07233195919783758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07871727298109564,0.07226674300358299,0.0,0.06318615280898418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24058168591020376,0.13496801060695365,0.37188109910049605,0.15462777806429304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137309078696484,0.0,0.0,0.06695986258242705,0.0,0.0,0.08280262612102543,0.0,0.0,0.07976728302049413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472165415688454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223539760179277,0.0,0.06799141117414678,0.0,0.0,0.07637632944668303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05585882437171975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228451034281079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145890195706497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15668025880065206,0.0657782931083148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15491073812975706,0.0743827278602993,0.0,0.0,0.0643343843345132,0.0,0.0,0.07542196023597979,0.0,0.06003103386157455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053321428223139865,0.0,0.1203228364169994,0.0,0.0,0.07875491488101212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100091781210538,0.0,0.05664140514053336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196127440693298,0.13178268226574802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25109482020221474,0.1534394733123491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777345644412565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523214361234249,0.0,0.07261879098705486,0.0,0.05484367409261026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tenamzobo,2020/03/24,"How to start loving yourself? Ive been dating my girlfriend for two years as of today i love her so much and ik she loves me  too but i literally cant see why. Theres been probably three separate times shes broken down crying for 20+ minutes because i dont take care of myself, but i really believe i dont deserve it. Ill be comforting her whiles shes crying over all this and i still cannot understand why she cares so much. I try and promise her that ill start taking care of myself but the next day ill be back to how i was the day before. I have an eating disorder, so major body issues come with that, and when i see a pic of us together i just want to rip all of my skin off she really doesnt deserve to have to look at me. On top of that ive got depression that i was prescribed prozac for last year, but i never told her that i havent taken them since a week after they were prescribed, so with no one pressuring me to take them, i sure as hell aint. I cant remember a time ive felt good about myself and it lasted more than a day or two. She does her best to help but she shouldnt have to be my therapist. I want to do better for her but i have no idea where to even begin with trying to love myself.",1.7153733766233756,2.8928562840909122,3.749978354978357,90.56818181818184,77.06818181818181,6.998268398268398,20.525974025974023,7.62386473244151,0.4988746753246756,945,21,219,13,21,323,140,264,0.171,0.657,0.17300000000000001,-0.5379,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,3,3,15,16,1,1,7,0,27,11,2,2,4,30,51,22,0,3,8,0,2,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,8,9,1,0,4,0,0,1,12,3,0,4,9,5,48,13,34,38,7,30,1,1,3,4,24,7,1,1,22,159,56,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849909888750776,0.0,0.062231681940193524,0.0,0.08686906830821993,0.11501781893445047,0.10713468699931172,0.09028822752155503,0.0,0.11339636157165955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122554790636631,0.0,0.0,0.08793946825198408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22427697266549226,0.1975142600386653,0.0,0.08792794059014168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700128768082305,0.0,0.08933758766285603,0.0,0.2392919234586329,0.0,0.0,0.10446114887561668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742792789358104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802015039972173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562627461225449,0.08164881702235849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842719772841753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524452707537075,0.0,0.10655298004594302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16643011518189638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572791187314938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685523479849791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009233349237522,0.0,0.07873628670860787,0.0,0.10857137052077166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06917723151429084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006774977060424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079992127514706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564540301622216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627012743196437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444795636971403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14451632368106482,0.0,0.08152732659886244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096216398942349,0.0,0.2302716162661041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11853162632843013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905625562126836,0.0,0.09676715236214567,0.09754912137829,0.0,0.13862162192320082,0.0,0.1994495939980847,0.10627684062311817,0.12279886936852515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204278781534914,0.0,0.08188855242339099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18423644502141687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148219491618046
mentalhealth,talking_about_223,2020/03/24,"Why does intimacy scare me so much? Why does love feel so wrong?

I’ve been trying to find answers for a while, but just can’t seem to figure out why it is that for me, dating and love and relationships sound great until I’m in one. My first boyfriend (back when I was fourteen) was perfect. I found him to be cute, nice, and funny. Once we actually went on a legit date tho, and he tried to hold my hand, I almost puked. Like... I liked him. I liked him a lot and I had a crush on him and all that... but once we actually started being a real couple, I wanted to faint. The same thing has happened with another guy. We’re not a couple yet, but I’ve been into him for a little bit, and he into me, and I love the idea of us dating... but idk... I just feel gross when I think it through? Like the entire idea of us dating and hanging out is fine, but the moment I picture us holding hands, or hugging, or like expressing intimacy... I want to vomit. And I don’t know why. 

Most websites I’ve been on have claims this will be due to a “trauma”. And I mean, I did have one moment I can think of that may have sparked this from when I was twelve... but I’m not sure thats directly impacting it, ya know? Could it be the way I was raised in an emotionally-lacking household? My fear of expressing emotions (I hate even the mention of emotional topics or sad things; whenever I hear something that would require me to talk about my emotions, I seize up and go quiet from the conversation)? My fear of intimacy? Or is it really related to my past trauma? 

Does anyone have any advice to give? Anyone been through something similar?",2.5437206931702363,4.124817051987768,4.181039755351684,86.65781855249745,75.72782874617738,7.046279306829766,24.037716615698265,7.793537801064563,1.1319961264016314,1244,39,263,18,27,417,170,327,0.113,0.7120000000000001,0.175,0.9772,0,0,2,0,0,0,60.0,5,1,0,3,12,24,1,3,16,0,29,8,2,0,3,63,52,30,0,4,14,0,4,5,0,3,2,3,0,1,14,19,0,3,14,0,0,3,4,9,0,3,12,7,42,15,36,32,6,32,0,1,0,4,25,11,0,9,22,181,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.17390375826041335,0.0,0.0,0.08707062503224107,0.0,0.0,0.08922399333171786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06059323790489371,0.09343248415973276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246060715997786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851486805376948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727762718991546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07114166235127041,0.19718201297144414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23392445713552215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3006873529996503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058851829489000376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20053176559491864,0.09010651989908904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814387191960823,0.07579114443933367,0.0,0.09769707007307232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547591767636188,0.05063940731440813,0.0,0.0,0.09823660298001624,0.0,0.08822618614162085,0.0787936738483087,0.0,0.0,0.08797097223693329,0.0,0.0,0.10042579287357713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20117335557707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793758732639203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21765663680030248,0.08930482412140722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575236231302633,0.2412573760491558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705951659142346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550111129204925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18978402009905895,0.12075728146430895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505909565783408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141895952860397,0.057081797591413436,0.0,0.0,0.09566350100348923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920785683949828,0.0,0.0,0.08111621540030049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371920076463232,0.0,0.0,0.06306771026004547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397872041296726,0.0,0.0,0.07161778458590742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839242619918132,0.11418747757064028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12099046065583642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3215405699367395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10511076303571376,0.07072598024798654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259956784652564,0.3216071496419872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329636349694083,0.09742037187685276,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Klynn2342,2020/03/24,"Weed Induced Mental Health Issues? My first post but one I’ve experienced and I’m hoping it never escalates further than just being drug induced. 


Whenever I smoke weed I always convince myself that’s how the world really is. My delusions are the worst of it and I don’t often remember them once I’m sober. I do remember the feelings of It being basically my worst insecurities and fear being shown to me through my friends mouths but their words are distorted to what my current delusion is (same with the tv) or my inner voice uncontrollably speaking at me negatively or I over analyze my movements, times in the past, everything everyone does feels so redundant and like it’s all not worth it. It’s the deepest melancholy wave when it first comes on.

Then the delusions feels like the most convincing truths. It’s traumatizing, It blurs the line between high and sober, almost like “everyone is in on it and I’m always allowing myself to be sober, airheaded, ignorant to the fact that life is so much more fucked up than when you’re sober.”

It was almost comforting the last time I tried it. I did to see if I still reacted the same way and to convince my boyfriend that I experienced really bad reactions. 

It was unusually different I did have the delusions but I just accepted all the punches and unusually had laughing fits, cracked a joke that I thought he understands because he “knows”. I saw the repetitive cycle started over again like I’m in 3rd person, which would turn the laughing to crying fits when it felt like I would feel and experience life like that forever.


I thought weed was supposed to be medicine 🤷🏻‍♀️",6.0926260733801705,7.455037416393446,6.478220140515226,74.48546448087434,66.63934426229507,10.268540202966431,34.52380952380953,10.398101306919678,3.827807181889149,1312,61,231,34,21,424,168,305,0.159,0.6729999999999999,0.168,0.0006,2,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,2,2,11,25,1,3,17,0,22,6,1,5,5,54,42,22,0,4,9,0,5,6,1,2,4,2,0,1,21,11,0,1,14,2,1,2,4,8,0,3,10,11,29,17,24,25,9,35,0,0,2,1,7,15,1,9,22,155,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401099546242853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19952025731032175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010519373056584,0.07308532901984398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032767357501762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13169623436005334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252620998149171,0.0,0.0,0.10491869711080286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13903718684914276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291247611909507,0.10775160969176333,0.11727782855967145,0.0,0.1349123462752681,0.2424849146113193,0.08565119527652276,0.11511556042182672,0.0,0.0,0.20396092544965547,0.0,0.0,0.09262861491544347,0.11083864462704868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274400754265879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266729634324309,0.0,0.11908026195802522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12513657612832305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588975893940525,0.0977283543338022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936717611982513,0.35144039109410913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082339770570152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813475093914741,0.0,0.09246845401719313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768155389823924,0.08124223174238929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445091637433474,0.0,0.1046854690337382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148238325235712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15361235602391116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716295644136906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553876574496832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08486049818739677,0.0,0.09574627107640102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19036243757026666,0.13982051171802198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813991083935184,0.1304085652913218,0.0,0.1248122760299921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951650518766082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17033632322002368,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itstecton,2020/03/24,"For my school project, I'm conducting a survey regarding Instagram and its effects on teenagers' mental health Link is below! Please will only take up to 5 minutes and would help me out a lot!

​

[https://forms.gle/nHkbCf4DzMxRhErb8](https://forms.gle/nHkbCf4DzMxRhErb8)",14.154912280701751,18.38032747368422,8.913157894736845,53.72043859649128,50.57894736842106,9.27719298245614,36.35087719298246,9.725611199111238,4.028129824561404,236,9,27,4,3,63,36,38,0.0,0.851,0.149,0.6792,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,7,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,6,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,17,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32200787307481743,0.3611213310372673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159016550935457,0.0,0.0,0.19920182087036595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25266237576273554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29950006841642024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22602823455236154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262280422550337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007746048859176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22345172084462092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21111697496895995,0.0,0.3611213310372673,0.0
mentalhealth,FrostyFullbuster,2020/03/24,"Not Really Sure About Myself or What to Do This is a bit of a vent but also a reach out to see if anyone has some advice. I suffered from depression through most of high school, and near the later part of junior year through now it's just transitioned into emotional numbness. I've been to a psychologist and was temporarily on medication for the depression which evened me out, but even prior to that time I had an issue of that same numbness, only difference being that I was either numb or sad. I was incredibly emotional when I was younger, with immense empathy for others that extended to even inanimate objects. Nowadays I fail to get happy at even things that I have the most interest in. I'm numb, unmotivated, chronically procrastinate, and find little joy in most things. I've turned to healthier eating habits and exercise again, but my condition hasn't really improved. If anyone has any advice whether it be behavioral or medical, it would be greatly appreciated.",9.372146892655364,8.871721807909605,9.613333333333333,61.16824858757063,59.73446327683616,13.516384180790965,39.440677966101696,12.650343791298138,5.383210169491526,788,35,126,25,9,263,117,177,0.20600000000000002,0.679,0.115,-0.9641,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,10,14,0,0,8,0,16,9,0,0,1,28,20,15,0,3,12,0,0,0,0,1,8,0,0,0,14,8,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,9,0,0,6,1,10,5,26,10,8,17,0,5,1,0,0,10,0,9,7,104,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28787208060289554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11779263478011905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100166396300067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20598571030068544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16080918751246154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25373182335443145,0.0,0.0,0.15389306997741922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072067875134926,0.0,0.33137656504680274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38915072898608605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462596327940798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07695613075451471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16239446587609968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567994331857636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15562641257457716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373885553016514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762938429686068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967706408338533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202531844857393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950731810280475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18872330170030244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907151294757073,0.11737591804760535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882482733239834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19571396234357472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588953812004388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16021585534399824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463492048962804,0.0,0.0,0.0948538565523552
mentalhealth,tank02002,2020/03/24,"Question about bad thoughts. As long as i could remember i've had thoughts of killing somebody. As i got older it has retracted to such a degree that its once in a blue moon or when i just cant handle somebody stress wise. When it happens i just think of what to use and do it in my head then the next minuete it passes and i think it through logically then i rationalize myself and destress. ( one other thought that i had when i was little but still happens on occasion is that i kill myself to save someone else. This happens every where church, school you name it but i dont think this is as bad as the first one.) Is this normal?",3.3316406249999986,4.809921382812501,4.0598125,88.75393750000002,73.453125,6.682500000000001,27.64375,7.1686216300943375,1.2893787500000005,499,19,104,5,10,159,78,128,0.125,0.8140000000000001,0.062,-0.8816,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,1,0,1,9,7,2,1,4,0,11,1,1,1,0,22,22,16,2,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,15,3,0,0,9,0,0,1,2,5,0,3,7,1,14,2,15,14,0,16,1,0,1,0,3,5,0,2,10,78,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25246475225513515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070817089772318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771865937494534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12629488360560115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737909206400627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859708521210486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12091570465699444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.401074698040336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515846337919026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345255278394572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152614678598994,0.0,0.13379313666434675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16078596421672353,0.0,0.14812828054637847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610060910487359,0.20489246506731326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936074862575476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712620697519653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530063412516958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12809776443178342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073578655527745,0.0,0.1731808312905447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906179255888018,0.0,0.3600697714737044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305744877473776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,llsifruby,2020/03/24,"Very overly sensitive and guilty all the time This is a problem that I have been experiencing for such a long time and I don't think it is normal. I've been diagnosed with some mental disorders in the past but it's a long list that I feel like I'm lying or just trying to get attention if I state them here, as I'm scared people will judge me that way and I'd feel bad for just saying it... which I guess is one of my biggest, most emotionally challenging problems that I wanted to talk about here.

I'm so, so prone to guilt and so sensitive all the time. Living this way is really hard. I will just be on the internet doing whatever and I might come across a comment where some person I don't know is mad about something, and I feel guilty that I feel differently from them. I also think of mistakes or regrettable decisions I make and I don't think ""I shouldn't have done that"" but rather ""I'm a terrible, irredeemable person for this"" and it's hard because I genuinely feel like I am that way sometimes. It's hard to enjoy things because it's so pervasive, I might just be having a perfectly fine day and all of a sudden that changes everything.

People saying anything that sounds remotely critical to me, even if it's not about me, hurts so bad. Even if they're completely kind and understanding, I jump to the conclusion that I'm terrible and they hate me and I shouldn't exist or whatever. It's so tiring. I feel so weird for this.  It's been getting to me and I wanted to voice it in some way. Thanks if you read this, and if anyone has experience with this and has been able to improve upon this, that'd be appreciated.",4.5342710643015485,5.3217806920731725,5.658082039911307,81.0516629711752,69.82317073170732,9.500221729490024,27.40909090909091,9.688023934748609,2.3179219512195117,1289,41,264,29,22,429,149,328,0.182,0.6920000000000001,0.126,-0.9601,1,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,3,3,22,21,2,2,12,0,30,2,0,1,4,68,55,34,0,14,16,0,9,2,0,6,2,4,0,2,30,18,0,0,14,1,0,2,6,13,0,1,5,14,32,8,29,40,7,23,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,15,10,185,62,2,0.10205561698710304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161384003290745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135966030866964,0.0,0.08398307707826576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704243546365233,0.12442431373869607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796131068045783,0.087911877412492,0.10700337272161002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581743010613987,0.0,0.0,0.10358430298804873,0.0,0.1066263983207035,0.11696457875122708,0.0,0.0,0.10443832913120688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479883279998053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13481354502106865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917210079638368,0.0998299763509276,0.0,0.0,0.30961431826120417,0.1458171063345258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663969537101352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11242576796328954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742653611631172,0.10075879313511912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925264874916972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627522035060492,0.056087098111151916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971843886313267,0.0,0.09011697954519073,0.18063201906121668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812291681374473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10284805818571076,0.21652976381579211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999283618816908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06915552729058835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742363424795523,0.14150502963659736,0.17822205656896972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19530688508904892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020832346864458,0.0,0.06537944152536364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16231744568134554,0.1021754763504211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856739994300105,0.10093561475561423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202843913616982,0.0,0.09395910051715647,0.0,0.0,0.06780121713353035,0.1961793556204014,0.0,0.0,0.1785283529241339,0.11729791873893232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928906482760255,0.0,0.0,0.10624349646821654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420657214320675,0.120390094137707,0.3240279938656193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,certifiedsexstallion,2020/03/24,Please help I can’t add a picture but last night I thought a bug was in my arm last night and got a piece of glass and cut myself really bad I have been diagnosed with depression and adhd and I’m scared to tell my therapist can someone prepare me for what he might say,1.95315789473684,3.679050631578949,3.3472280701754364,91.36926315789476,77.77192982456141,7.3670175438596495,23.68070175438596,8.238735603445708,1.2280975438596489,214,7,48,4,5,70,46,57,0.265,0.68,0.055,-0.9454,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,3,0,6,2,1,0,0,9,9,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,1,7,0,5,4,1,5,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,4,28,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275578619517824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19145910358844875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974990358241865,0.2327385406648433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833952044125232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15369751053885855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738264203610626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24325510616606205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4303721850334809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517067250865844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14689789254894353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823515935454043,0.2295731165008265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194288374362918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200421637191941,0.0,0.0,0.2662393973681033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820416119078284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ItsWoodenshoe,2020/03/24,"My psychologist left me My psychologist left me...

First of all, sorry for my English. I copied a message I sent to an internet friend of mine and I’m too angry or whatever to translate it so I just used Google Translate...

Well yesterday was quite a fucked up day... I had gotten a certain diagnosis a few months ago that I did not agree with and that I felt like I could not discuss with them and I had several appointments to discuss.  Every time I felt that I was  not listened to and I had the feeling that I was getting nowhere.  Today I had another appointment where this was going to be discussed and I made a list of things I wanted to discuss.  Again: The struggles I am having and what I want are being ignored.  In fact ... They have stopped my trajectory, which makes me feel very lonely, angry, sad, unheard of and everything that comes with it.  I just have complaints that I also indicated where I really need the psychologist because otherwise it simply goes wrong and then they suddenly do this.  I feel so bad about that and because of my sorrow I can't even cry anymore.  I have also sent some emails with additional questions and comments and I hope they will respond as soon as possible and I will also make an appointment with the doctor soon, because they would also pass on some things to them.  During the conversation I got so angry that I just printed in the rounding (it was a video call because of corona) and they didn't even make the attempt to reach me again ... So yeah I feel really bad since yesterday 16:30 approximately :(

This is also the message I sent (maybe a bit angry):

Once again I feel as if this conversation has not helped me and I have not been heard again.  Thanks.  I can see the letters appear.  Also i will gladly receive an email with what will happen next.

 I do not feel that I am ready at [psychologist] as I just indicated in the conversation, but it turns out that this is not the case.  I struggle with great gloom that is separate from the moments of failure (as I will call them).  Here I have the feeling that I got the right help at [psychologist].
 The gloom is accompanied by gloomy and suicidal thoughts and this is a problem that I have mentioned more often.  I even think I need help with these feelings before I can start working on the anxiety.  This was also indicated after my first attempt.  In addition, I cannot guarantee how I feel lately that this will not happen again in, for example, a year if I do not get help, although fortunately it still remains only with thoughts.
 I also think that medication for me should be looked at again, because after my Lexapro did not work it was neither stopped nor looked at other medication, while (it seems to me) that should have happened.  I only start to become increasingly distraught because I can talk as a bridge man, but you don't listen anyway.  For the umpteenth time.  I don't think it would be a good thing if my trajectory at [psychologist] is stopped.

 Also was I first given the option to have the diagnosis removed from my file?  Isn't this a middle ground that can be found?  Or what about that?  I hope to get a response asap ...",4.733548085901028,6.370295781512606,5.452044817927173,79.52436041083101,70.17647058823529,8.246872082166199,29.692810457516337,8.778014704023537,2.3913353874883283,2470,98,457,44,45,801,248,595,0.124,0.7929999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.9782,0,2,0,0,0,0,78.0,0,1,8,8,39,24,1,3,35,1,63,4,0,6,3,99,120,47,1,15,21,0,12,1,1,10,3,3,0,1,45,29,0,4,19,1,0,10,18,14,1,3,30,18,79,10,59,74,8,65,0,5,4,1,41,21,1,14,35,364,124,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059191237210189235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48059322779707997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001849731337915,0.05108202658248319,0.0,0.0662219940880891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150721857003153,0.2442293387657683,0.07374678026557255,0.05681986637316579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290005547111933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636770478715027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05752000029833613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0533137092415932,0.0,0.07334824619170914,0.043063789680857514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834615138511722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231104905393135,0.0,0.056260084360922544,0.0,0.06001228230730413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038670576080144,0.0,0.12822727251612048,0.0,0.0,0.17039412227007394,0.0,0.07321438683725559,0.05158952709794257,0.061731607081744286,0.10466018057106516,0.0,0.03794927681611522,0.056006972058659975,0.106810743181379,0.07361871391616262,0.0,0.0,0.1771444275599208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790291668571275,0.0,0.0,0.13264355527115634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753241269708614,0.0,0.14510057496661413,0.0,0.0,0.03262246696338875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214690319458533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06318329621485476,0.13371675059552282,0.0,0.06708358850848606,0.0,0.0,0.1345358217005543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05329847340067217,0.0,0.0,0.09902434241483607,0.0,0.0,0.07101504465379398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111226904076713,0.0,0.1015694694488521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752777984321753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389382424332615,0.0,0.0,0.07480230743304515,0.07102250650791814,0.0,0.0,0.08555443488935416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570247420621857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05321033623144762,0.0607886599736285,0.0,0.07543576025381643,0.0,0.05523625025410855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474817151205057,0.09452614561450616,0.0,0.05332590637063935,0.1674784875592977,0.0,0.1396136375182454,0.0,0.07304006019903983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536705162312241,0.0,0.06147664739793475,0.0,0.0,0.1330852944289659,0.12835849860043394,0.0,0.10602240074977436,0.07787306422221436,0.0,0.06329406742363575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263107862556177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057671408839689166,0.0,0.055095650296177835,0.0787702237119284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060037962004642474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722472364427084,0.0,0.0,0.09486885203395408,0.07300702863541762,0.0,0.043000350361078944
mentalhealth,peeweeweeme,2020/03/24,"It’s time I think I’m finally gonna end it all.
I’ve already pushed everyone away so I won’t be missed
No one would even know I’m not around 
It gotten to the point where I’m just ready to end it 
Haven’t had a girlfriend in 23 years depression/ suicidal thoughts at an all time high can’t push them back anymore just know I won’t ever find love and will never be happy. I sit in my empty apartment building up the courage to just pull the trigger",0.7547422680412339,2.789237309278352,2.3043402061855685,95.81836597938148,83.12371134020619,5.5294845360824745,22.07113402061856,6.742157984588678,0.3849843298969069,357,12,82,4,10,116,69,97,0.14300000000000002,0.7559999999999999,0.10099999999999999,-0.4699,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,11,5,0,0,5,0,9,1,0,1,4,17,20,2,1,1,4,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,5,0,0,3,7,2,0,1,3,0,6,3,9,10,2,23,0,2,0,1,3,10,0,0,9,48,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286787518978405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055122462014077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844748388241481,0.0,0.0,0.19469539976837533,0.1593437991643994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17848322216300536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3670809872377155,0.0,0.0,0.13687064377316313,0.18744754147605094,0.0,0.19801307054289624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22700566390718,0.18940056785342546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22059564857369068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189453668267636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277716893993764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18702931674108686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598252621246784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404215212834309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19589530113546733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266713203203069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327818837717548,0.0,0.16451408648890992,0.24166998543724405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720721676028198,0.0,0.0,0.13344657937055865
mentalhealth,Kruize_base,2020/03/24,"Mental Illness And Africa ""One thing I've always feared more than my depression and anxiety is opening up about my struggles in a continent that has so little knowledge about mental illnesses""

I'm a Nigerian dealing with depression and anxiety. I've been with depression and anxiety for more than a year and in those months I've experienced a lot of misconceptions about mental health.

I was living in a different city far away from home at the time my depression started. Just like every other depressed folks, I didn't understand what was happening at first. And growing up in a country that believes mental illness is a moral  failure, affliction from witches, household enemies or your village people, it's difficult to know where and who to turn to. Years of bad leadership and corruption did a number on the country. Same goes with religion. 

All these made it difficult for me to open up about my mental health struggles. I was forced to suck it up and act normal or risk being termed mad and crazy. The misunderstanding and stigma for mental illness seems to be highest in Africa. If you're depressed it must be the witches from your fathers house.

I eventually sought help in one of the few psychiatrist facility in the state I was. I was placed on medications and eventually started getting better. My family was not aware of what I was going through. Explaining to them was difficult  while i was not medicated. Realizing I needed help and support I decided to return home and tell them about it. Few of my siblings I spoke with on phone understood—thanks to their exposure, but it was a different case with my parents. 

After taking my time to explain to them they became worried—which Is normal for African parents. I had to assure them I was in a better place. They became worked up when i mentioned the pills. Africans believe you don't need medications or therapy  for mental illness, all you need is Jesus,  fasting and much prayers. 

My mum suggested I stop taking antidepressants and turn to prayers. Being an African, she invited a prayer warrior to pray away the illness, as it is their believe that depression and anxiety are spiritual attacks. I'm only trying for the sake of peace to cope while emphasizing the need for pills. 

Care to share your experience dealing with depression and anxiety in Africa ?",7.492869704236611,8.749852515587534,7.49664268585132,68.82363709032775,63.412470023980816,10.878017585931255,37.74660271782575,10.825029732296443,4.552490967226218,1877,93,296,49,27,603,205,417,0.18600000000000005,0.7390000000000001,0.075,-0.9897,4,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,5,8,4,9,28,3,4,22,0,28,13,0,1,4,56,53,28,0,8,8,4,0,1,0,1,13,1,2,0,17,26,0,1,8,0,0,3,4,21,0,3,17,2,39,7,69,31,10,48,3,8,0,0,31,28,1,6,17,218,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05564333848452807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25578667974405545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607720678045937,0.12565796886515715,0.0,0.05583580588657321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226027472412602,0.0,0.11828671443765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818104585262283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13788537452699107,0.4607779988678468,0.0,0.0,0.13973521312060969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634302765010341,0.0,0.0,0.0654142090557404,0.06304151110906839,0.07525023725145573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05688177714587207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034938159767354954,0.0,0.03800522479196557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059135196196061376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421648377773733,0.0,0.0,0.08964655326230216,0.0,0.13415728803450205,0.0,0.0,0.07716197172696801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036751417713208966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03267056171372327,0.06702388704251958,0.059049707862484264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05685267089233576,0.0,0.06327644627797463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20210124837465,0.471742780829795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05337705043699174,0.0,0.04915903622887774,0.19834066465025568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104184794146792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09062917341870078,0.05085960579840451,0.0,0.0,0.1485081588260574,0.0,0.0,0.046361022657905857,0.0,0.13973521312060969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608782796651093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466550390946636,0.0,0.0,0.0559084660853281,0.0,0.13981946753861968,0.0,0.0,0.07588620431702937,0.0,0.0,0.10055970626536764,0.0,0.05844957706358753,0.0615672813776189,0.07647461618788412,0.0,0.04442716660791027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798787116142453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04540208800587808,0.14547631478843934,0.0,0.06961670775473601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04868403020354969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612749009815658
mentalhealth,animelord76,2020/03/24,"How Do I Start Change? Ever since I was little I was a pretty energetic and happy kid, and I enjoyed being who I was. I grew up in a loving household which also included two of my grandparents who couldn’t afford to live on their own, as they had little money and my grandfather suffered a stroke in 2000 which caused him to lose the ability to speak and walk normally. My father and brother were always not the most clean minded individuals so I picked up on cussing and more sexual views earlier than my other classmates. In middle school is when things began to get rocky. I began to wonder what it would be like to be in a relationship so I started to dive into that type of stuff, however I tended to find a lot of people who I could have feelings with. By eighth grade I jumped relationships and feelings for people very fast because nothing really fulfilled what I wanted. I didnt really know what I wanted though. Anyway my grandfather who lived with me died that year and it hit me hard. I stopped being me and my entire world just kinda collapsed for a while. Things didn’t feel quite ok for a long time and I ended up forming depression, anxiety and insomnia from it. And with his death having occurred, my reaction at first was to say f you to life and just do what I wanted because I felt as if there was no point in life. I started becoming more sexual with my friends and ended up forming a lot of throwaway relationships that I’m not very proud of. This kind of things continued for a while, until I basically had a reputation for being that guy. The consequences to my actions didn’t really hit me until my junior year of highschool, and my world kind of fell apart again. I finally got myself to stop doing things like that and I was in a good place. Then my grandma who also lived with us unexpectedly died. By this point I had already experienced a lot of pain in my life and so her death kind of didn’t phase me too much. I cried, but I felt as if I didnt feel as bad as I shouldve. This is where I ask for help. I’m stuck in a world now where a lot of people view me as the sick fuck up who was overly sexual. But I dont want to be that guy anymore. I know how awful my actions were and I’ve tried to apologize and make amends but I cant seem to do anything right. I want to change and be a better person, but my depression combats those feelings. I am medicated and I’ve been to therapy but nothings worked. I’m worried that I’ll always just be this way because I’ve been so traumatized by my past. I have a new girlfriend who I’ve been with for 6 months now and I’ve made it this far without being sexual. It’s been a step in the right direction but I really don’t know how to fix anything else. I guess what I’m asking is how do repair myself from the death of two of my idols, multiple people telling me I’ve messed up their lives, and a family that doesn’t understand that their sexual jokes aren’t funny anymore. I know all of this is my fault and I know there isn’t any taking back what I’ve done, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to figure out a way to move forward and break away from this old shell of a self I was.",4.4297021966681385,4.957590631578949,5.624360902255641,82.13385964912285,69.92879256965944,8.814919652071355,26.681261978475604,8.909455092898707,1.8485218634822345,2492,73,514,43,42,833,280,646,0.13,0.8059999999999999,0.065,-0.9890000000000001,4,0,0,0,2,1,42.0,1,1,4,6,26,23,1,0,26,2,55,10,0,8,2,96,99,57,5,12,15,2,9,2,2,1,8,2,1,5,44,33,0,3,17,1,1,9,17,9,0,3,30,14,77,14,87,55,12,82,0,4,2,2,36,38,1,11,36,370,121,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724068203463162,0.10494318673721803,0.10919241920583957,0.0,0.0,0.044619856119757516,0.0,0.05019462728615538,0.0,0.13014316517103353,0.0,0.0,0.10798967107829936,0.0,0.12268070230553015,0.0,0.06164663186364053,0.050453213268150186,0.05478505504084597,0.11999328777507548,0.07246564783421848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058030362938003274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740378230272227,0.13882209172569035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05238754105229434,0.0,0.07207403711246872,0.0,0.0,0.11302670226013604,0.0,0.13619420863625262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671460322913373,0.0768992677540504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05481218338723052,0.0,0.11622928179765285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05935173402589855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06185515908885503,0.0,0.16588236956655145,0.0,0.12599970248780334,0.0718770685414023,0.059970123049209935,0.055811342601345036,0.0,0.0,0.0506933114795063,0.06065920278711301,0.034280673046409645,0.0,0.0,0.05503401638482716,0.05247761103888018,0.0,0.07228135789646369,0.12993660242461252,0.0,0.06984745789844918,0.058777369541910776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043979766000640526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20498104776644965,0.1802990402195881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390355942591435,0.06411149595790433,0.13152518468651164,0.2317539037200502,0.05806643732061473,0.0,0.0734054242670272,0.0,0.2231311363452318,0.05921931103951431,0.06208567311037205,0.04379793903452052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660993296339938,0.0,0.0,0.06625156342187097,0.0,0.0523725698890969,0.06973743269806755,0.04823393273887777,0.0,0.0,0.0633705323768154,0.0,0.0,0.06428791290942798,0.12591704826851954,0.0,0.06885098842499081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981805688529923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263610827145986,0.181954295293805,0.05729172452756519,0.06855279708426157,0.0,0.1240531160703544,0.0,0.0,0.06675315549762963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978870028457274,0.0,0.0,0.16813635868634025,0.0,0.0,0.21133504983119075,0.0,0.11206821128283498,0.0,0.05217898706266418,0.0,0.06640499913113804,0.0,0.05973263659917988,0.06844984399525153,0.0,0.0,0.05427668359462737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932604965042694,0.0,0.0,0.1645690436324757,0.0,0.0,0.07511247696101345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04933365745477898,0.0,0.05734963874342203,0.0,0.07503547214115318,0.0,0.17436444082978564,0.0,0.0644655462830908,0.0,0.03826012489885516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044547684964452085,0.0,0.12819093524438824,0.06830661983913155,0.07892571549409053,0.0,0.0,0.10827705229116097,0.23220547137551265,0.10416287928191738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06324967663579084,0.07115572143027847,0.04776786565469893,0.06663433058884223,0.0,0.04661039300408923,0.0,0.0,0.08450669262556622
mentalhealth,thebrucekwayne,2020/03/24,"I don’t get why I’m so stupid I’m a 26 y/o woman with a job in content marketing. I hated, and I mean HATED, school. Anything that wasn’t writing-focused was incredibly difficult for me and I got low grades, and dreaded going to school every day. Same thing in high school— I literally woke up with a stomach ache every morning, got shitty grades (but tried not to) and got so frustrated trying to figure out homework question answers/etc. Academic-related frustration was actually what lead to my first time self harming in 6th grade. 

College was much easier. I was no longer at a school where you had to be smart to have friends, it didn’t matter how your friends were doing in class. And I was taking classes at hours I chose with assignments that I could do. Then I was diagnosed ADHD which explained a ton. It made life a lot easier to be prescribed something that actually calmed me down and helped me complete tasks. 

I got my bachelors in journalism advertising and media studies. I do well at my job in content marketing. But my stupidity comes out at really embarrassing times. 

Tonight even, my boyfriend asked me to do a puzzle with him. I said yes but I knew it was going to be awful because I get so frustrated. 

Well, here I am upstairs writing this because I kept putting puzzle pieces in wrong (it was a 3D puzzle and also I honestly just think I’m legitimately stupid). So he had to check my puzzle pieces. And then he said “I don’t want to do these things where I just always have to tell you how to do them. Some of it is common sense.” 

I don’t think I have common sense maybe? I continuously have these issues and it makes me not participate in things and lose connections because of it. I’m so heartbroken. I’m so disappointed in myself. My parents never put pressure on me and were and still are completely supportive and encouraging to me. So why can’t I even do a fucking puzzle? Why can’t I do literal children’s games? 

I honestly don’t know what to do. It’s so hard when things don’t make sense to me. I’m so ashamed of myself. Am I missing something that other people have to be smart?",3.1638699569134374,5.273161724637681,4.649629194411805,81.6562338425382,75.47342995169082,7.760699830265048,27.372764068416238,8.605353355243054,2.1643348478913693,1670,67,319,34,37,557,199,414,0.16699999999999998,0.7340000000000001,0.099,-0.9869,3,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,3,1,3,23,31,9,4,9,2,44,4,1,6,1,56,80,32,0,2,7,1,1,0,2,0,2,2,1,3,23,21,0,1,8,1,1,6,13,20,2,1,24,3,49,11,43,51,7,42,0,4,0,1,23,22,1,8,14,222,72,16,0.0,0.0,0.17792819997686052,0.0,0.1095628734383716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290479022676928,0.07585676273095249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502120491476451,0.0,0.08522717047704652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16672040836281818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853076118725623,0.191169988783283,0.0,0.0,0.07278800672362792,0.0,0.0,0.05879402235231691,0.0,0.0,0.09253077513672743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016733141770194,0.12042753061888965,0.0,0.1536212526567146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754508608194141,0.0,0.0,0.14086803933515293,0.08428077309280244,0.09526012521571774,0.0,0.1036225862106482,0.0,0.2916526050592828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166612678276097,0.18001355343790726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061106122544723016,0.09632105592742164,0.0,0.0,0.0897793738378225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515279994417793,0.1809348195357433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05010201848820038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439268807352509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199055744505373,0.0,0.07750540646837717,0.0,0.08626273157748851,0.12170697905990405,0.0,0.09158771282023924,0.09930564612569033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701692329861114,0.0,0.0703122346676859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122818359300306,0.0,0.0,0.06320248194135478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832924439838647,0.10212590595988078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058402771731217135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17343799391107464,0.0,0.0,0.3690562623212182,0.0,0.0,0.09510520258975673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403668742751871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280465918926292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10345320665887256,0.0,0.0,0.06854489671380261,0.0,0.0796824169755724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24226447427282374,0.11682997853110265,0.0,0.0,0.10631834105764916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379039472296778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05377160635347853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393695521216908,0.0,0.2467872825517031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996748522430902,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lolgrazer,2020/03/24,"Why do i feel so fatigued?? Idk if whats how u say it in a sentence but i feel so tired n no energy n body feels heavy I always exercise at home like cardio but since yesterday i feel so tired and heavy i just dont have a mood, whats happening??",-1.3161558441558476,0.6388483454545444,1.8488311688311685,95.8018181818182,92.8181818181818,6.051948051948052,16.948051948051948,7.447530270364453,0.2307142857142859,189,5,47,4,7,67,39,55,0.3,0.574,0.126,-0.9072,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,3,6,1,1,0,10,8,8,0,1,4,0,4,1,0,0,5,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,5,1,2,8,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,25,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20281295248882625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707425247311679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28566392522226797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4929733163869412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21554033354530008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444931992329755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190800778869697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19383350054926227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20162598340049434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5602913747409504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21993933306701333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MajesticEfficiency1,2020/03/24,Anyone ever feel like their the only one living in this reality Anyone know what this is called or means or experience this ever? It rarely happens but when it does I feel like I'm the only one living in this reality or like my perception is completely different than the rest of the worlds and thus making me experience something so different than everyone else. It fucks with my mind so much I can physically feel it.,5.364599156118143,7.183320164556964,6.72221518987342,70.31893459915611,68.87341772151899,10.329957805907174,28.356540084388186,10.504223727775694,3.345200843881857,339,12,58,10,6,115,49,79,0.049,0.853,0.098,0.4767,2,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,5,4,1,0,4,0,3,1,0,2,2,17,12,8,0,0,4,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,3,6,3,6,12,2,6,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,3,6,42,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22859632092578036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16691550365315772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17138939020312496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415711658974689,0.0,0.0,0.14304886214398502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365535921309656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957259492175689,0.0,0.15619730934498538,0.0,0.31979924250224,0.0,0.0,0.24795764776032755,0.23355810476066804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112027152544866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455109388089593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983579955505283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395814542204845,0.0,0.28868424944662485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911380524371043,0.0,0.0,0.17806073266556266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16505251953996422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016519633172633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22153551519064985,0.24864419585709224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12584293769047256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SniperSpencer,2020/03/24,"I wrote a poem about suicide like I've experienced for myself a few years back. Suicide is an answer to those who are depressed 
They are among the people who dont feel like the rest.
The tears streaming down their face of sadness.
Their bodies filled with remorse and guilt but no gladness. 
Everyday they weep and sorrow
Endlessly hoping there is no tomorrow.
Day by day, they keep their attitude with a smile.
Building up the sadness and the anger just to pile.
Their voices cannot be heard
Anixety restricting not to speak even a single word.
As the final hit blew with the strong feeling of grief.
They took a breath with a sigh of relief. 
The majority of people may not comprehend
The happiness only exists when it all comes to an end and only ascends to a far greater existence.
After it comes to an end with the soul having no purpose.
The body nothing more than a decaying carcass.",4.58704020530368,6.752202832335332,4.889687767322499,81.25205089820362,71.57485029940119,7.645680068434559,28.096236099230108,8.418075326091056,2.178798460222413,711,27,124,12,14,224,110,167,0.252,0.612,0.136,-0.9758,0,0,0,0,0,2,14.0,0,0,8,1,6,17,1,1,22,0,9,4,4,0,1,25,19,7,3,1,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,5,11,0,2,3,0,0,4,7,9,1,0,3,6,10,7,24,13,7,20,1,6,0,0,13,4,0,2,14,91,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13179953823652638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807836855366841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29529972885387223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22108354225000346,0.0,0.14763050954860873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20088488570279006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30362715629381354,0.0,0.0,0.11321110543389992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333460681089252,0.12245146284614288,0.0,0.18776533405717236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18246335766729527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17024341838763496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235226209559302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674792350289986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16446731281210375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607218066108503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376607013354981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3749775705907095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19043678995608346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037892677666966
mentalhealth,Lord_Greedyy,2020/03/24,"How do you obtain self-love and motivation in life? I have been working on my internship at home for the past weeks, which gave me an opportunity to reflect on my attitudes towards work, study, and just life in general. After speaking with my girlfriend, I began realizing how bad the problem is. I don’t care about many things, not just the mundane stuffs, but also my own life. I do things because they NEED to be dealt with, if the matter isn’t urgent, I will just leave it until it has to be done. As I delve deeper, I realize that I am not living for myself, I hate myself. I’m trapped in my own failures, such as the getting into huge debt, hurting my families, damaging friendships, failed to live up to my families’ expectations. Deep down inside I had already given up on life in general, no matter how hard I try to fake it, there is no convincing way to fake motivation, especially when you don’t care. A former friend once said to me that she felt as if I was soulless, looking back now, I think she was right. She is currently working her dream job, living happily with the people she loves, when I am still trying to sort out the damage I did to myself years ago. 

If you finished reading my essay, I thank you for the patience. This coronavirus thing completely destroyed my hope and threw me back to the dark hole that I have been trying to climb out.",6.495454545454546,6.393859151515155,7.007333333333335,76.17100000000002,65.43939393939394,9.918787878787882,32.75151515151515,9.558583805096642,2.923439696969698,1072,40,202,19,15,352,154,264,0.18600000000000005,0.6509999999999999,0.163,-0.8896,3,1,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,4,1,9,16,18,2,0,11,0,23,5,0,5,0,37,40,17,0,7,9,0,2,0,2,1,4,2,1,0,12,9,0,0,7,2,1,2,7,10,0,0,13,5,42,8,39,24,2,37,0,4,1,1,16,18,0,5,16,155,54,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765709069680156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402184214585156,0.09712261317309466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18677336063187666,0.1014047290506329,0.07403410063598649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476504232828337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733682391206036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242843546702945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289823618179313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660995577817675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938310915527246,0.0,0.06345201915655183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879432772792826,0.11990561019435245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218231135675054,0.1206261258694802,0.0,0.0,0.1300135214606148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051925828641408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859681182039942,0.0,0.0,0.3431316990550438,0.0,0.0,0.321724717566268,0.0,0.10198645861812272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961234201644736,0.0,0.0,0.12313008659031904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09005279425642758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293390771777846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11593668352286855,0.08419735090213315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621016143155005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148173042601915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037166668159058,0.1155256817813171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669765283107745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969892201821526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390298936247242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181379738951384,0.0,0.0,0.24205568743008735,0.07781952857009176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473674209299542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640045577066114,0.09741895353037168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652486597173444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820908696971837
mentalhealth,DaddyisHome44,2020/03/24,Really pissed off 26 Male. I really need to rant. All my close highschool friends are married and all of them except one has a child. I feel alone and rejected. Have constant thoughts about killing others. Several times I went into a university with a glock and one time almost pulled it out because we had an exam and I left my pencil at home and when I asked around everyone ignored me. I dont know WTF stopped me from slaughtering 30 people. There must be a god. I recently made a post on r/rate me and got no responses and some fat fuck gets a hundred up votes and amazing responses. It makes me want harm as many people as possible. The only thing stopping me is that for some stupid fucking reason is that I actually have a conscious which keeps stopping me. I'm close to graduating my undergrad with math and will start taking acturial exams. It keeps me occupied and gives me something to cling onto.,3.0012643678160917,5.604029816091952,4.048965517241381,83.2509195402299,78.42528735632183,7.544827586206896,26.90804597701149,8.515128840125781,2.257301149425288,724,30,133,16,18,234,124,174,0.185,0.732,0.083,-0.9605,0,2,1,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,1,0,4,10,5,0,9,0,11,4,2,3,3,40,30,13,2,3,1,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,2,8,18,1,6,5,0,0,2,2,8,0,2,5,1,21,2,20,22,4,23,0,1,0,2,7,11,3,3,9,88,29,7,0.0,0.0,0.14162169868712288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532237400372294,0.15030640464117498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12919259593368865,0.1356728911867375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846724855390636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568292696154754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17008617965606104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867377673452488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337988861508632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212371633031347,0.2683326477448523,0.07582216170316149,0.13921774640476672,0.0,0.0,0.11607023889521675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455728586557396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25798868970298466,0.16056002833966124,0.0,0.07975726126466008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576794421475794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732139796821424,0.09687249755116548,0.14713462960006446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760882976924696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966817911342108,0.1103745955907174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20122370382976776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16360736359059108,0.1389902551990533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18594241366319453,0.1492133376984658,0.14329407018711915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16395067486861628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172481471087246,0.0,0.0,0.10272068123979253,0.0,0.0,0.36399462229762375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091164268531302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641503253144264,0.0,0.0,0.11521355452394333,0.16924786587105706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085598867789426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345329304698537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway27185757827,2020/03/24,"My girlfriend died several years back, and I met someone else now for the first time, but I’m struggling with this a lot. I’m 28 now and my old girlfriend of five years died soon after we graduated college. 

I loved that girl more with all my heart. We’d been together since high school and all throughout college. She was diagnosed with cancer a few months after we graduated and died approximately six months later. It was obviously very painful for everybody involved, but she and I made our peace. 

After that, I completely focused myself in my career, and I’ve seen a lot of success in it. I’m in a very good place right now professionally. To get through this, I refused to even look at any girl I found even remotely attractive for like three years. I just didn’t want to feel anything that would remind me of her. Regrettably, I think it’s made me somewhat of a cold hearted person, but it was just like the light of my life was destroyed. 

About a year ago, I met this one girl through a mutual friend, and something about her and I just kind of clicked. I’ve been official for about four months now, and I really like her; however, ever since I started to become close to her, I’ve been having these sort of panic attacks where I just can’t stop thinking about my old girlfriend. I repressed these emotions for so long it’s all flooding back to me at once and I can’t handle it. I haven’t told this new girl for obvious reasons, but I think she’s beginning to suspect that something’s up. 

I feel like I’m desecrating the bond my old girlfriend and I had by being in a new relationship. She was the girl I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. I don’t know what to do now. I just don’t. Things like this just make we wish I could be at work 24/7. Work has no emotion. It’s such a safe place for me mentally. Sure, it’s an incredibly stressful and high hours job, but work related stress keeps my mind off those other thoughts. 

I don’t really know what I was hoping to accomplish by posting this, but it feels a little bit better to say this on here.",4.036593851132686,5.264485264563112,4.773766990291263,85.2976084142395,71.35436893203884,8.017605177993529,27.81100323624595,8.447377352677275,1.8014075080906151,1627,58,336,26,30,524,198,412,0.146,0.7,0.154,0.3514,2,0,2,0,0,0,43.0,5,0,0,7,25,23,2,5,16,0,25,8,2,4,7,70,56,19,3,6,12,0,3,5,5,1,5,1,0,6,27,20,0,5,12,0,1,0,8,8,0,6,19,9,52,15,51,32,10,52,0,0,3,1,32,18,0,5,38,225,79,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314705970540493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05611494044105473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790512663850327,0.0,0.0,0.09387592150737158,0.0,0.12690220470470967,0.0,0.0,0.09113443802520524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298029718650154,0.09008807657014756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651835379449685,0.0,0.0,0.06588375673181758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375384014102608,0.2569213766241554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893304178219131,0.185642859262475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090044704924292,0.0746420833585314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517045232236373,0.05895073993584698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018960701271748,0.0,0.0904765194594963,0.06375305529442821,0.0,0.04311214991629608,0.0,0.0,0.0692120239782474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955680042624791,0.0,0.17436919356699604,0.0,0.0819588043286098,0.08126342088092818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188619369582642,0.0733456209724505,0.0,0.08592960090897027,0.09069926067306644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656953905750495,0.20157016909741396,0.08270452380408116,0.0,0.07302566514614389,0.06929417773969497,0.0,0.0,0.14030738235631932,0.07447554521519821,0.15616069399599192,0.05508127892135437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315854406139915,0.0,0.08331946489399063,0.0,0.1975947859749141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939243015480398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25976568174535186,0.08787877453618073,0.055916203618540286,0.0,0.08780476775437053,0.09681687055334803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205136881214816,0.17242709681207075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902925192907008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572604412189072,0.08484205197883385,0.0,0.08859324648765847,0.0,0.07046975885123044,0.0,0.06562147451657623,0.0,0.08351242911296848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322163751391678,0.0,0.13651917025800747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991707261361943,0.1270524831524211,0.0,0.0,0.058406530618993764,0.0,0.0,0.06898858404422765,0.1890477450615632,0.08626553152598995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777720593457352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054821166309569916,0.15862224213157414,0.0,0.0655099237934084,0.0481167985885975,0.0,0.0,0.07884930365667124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361716703914034,0.0973422845750669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489140909615697,0.0,0.0,0.18022184533823424,0.0,0.0,0.05861828465646865,0.0,0.0,0.2125550566916502
mentalhealth,whinginininging,2020/03/24,"Going Through What Feels Like The Hardest Time Ever In My Life... I (22/F) don't have a clue on how to feel better. My mom has stage 4 metastatic breast cancer in her lungs. She's not doing well at all lately and it's killing me. She was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer 3 years ago and ever since then I think I was in denial of this whole thing. My mom? Cancer? That can't be right... A couple of weeks ago she had her will drawn up and I think then is when it hit me that this is real. This is going to happen. I am scared, I'm heartbroken and I feel overwhelmingly sad every day. I do my best to keep her spirits up and make her laugh and talk to her. She's my best friend. I don't want her to know how I feel or how scared I am because I just don't want her to worry. I cry everyday, sometimes I get these horrible panic attacks when I think of it, my whole body starts to shake uncontrollably as if I'm freezing cold. I've never felt this before and I'm very scared. I've tried talking to my brother about it - he says he has accepted death and has this ""it is what it is"" sort of attitude. I've talk to my boyfriend, who basically lives with us, about how I feel. He's been very good with me until recently. I feel like I've said too much and he's gotten to a point where he's just tired of listening to me. He told me that I am always unhappy about something, I complain about this too much, etc. I can't help how I feel.. I feel horrible. I feel guilty almost got feeling sad all of the time. I feel horrible that I put this on him now. I try very hard every day to do better, to feel better. I don't really know where to go from here. I want this all to be over but then I also just wish time would stop. I wish none of this was real. Sometimes I feel like none of it even is real and I'm in some kind of F'd up nightmare. 

On top of all this, I am extremely stressed out at work. The amount of work I have, the time Ive taken off work to go to the doctors, hospital or chemo treatments for my mom. I'm backed up more than ever. My boss knows my situation and we talk frequently about it. I just feel crazy. I feel like everywhere I am, I am always upset or stressed. If it's not at home, then it's at work. 
I don't really have any friends.. I talk to one friend who I've known since I was 7 (We just started talking again - it's been since high school where we didn't talk) and she makes me laugh and feel better. Unfortunately I would rather talk to her about what's going on with my mom in person but I don't feel comfortable going out with all that's what's happening with Coronavirus.. 


The thought of losing my mom scares the hell out of me. I'm scared for me, my brother, her boyfriend... we all do our best to help my mom whether that be just talking to her, hanging out with her, taking care of her, taking her to doctors appointments/chemo, etc. It's just extremely difficult to see her like this. She's lost so much weight, she is tired and she doesn't want to do it anymore. I don't blame her but.. she's my mom. I love her so much, I don't want her to give up. I don't know what I should be doing. Sometimes I feel like I'm not even doing enough and other days I feel like I'm doing too much.... 

I'm sorry if this seems like it's all over the place.. my mind feels like it's all over the place. I just wish I knew of better ways to cope with how I'm feeling. Or at least know if what I'm feeling is normal??? I don't feel normal. I feel very alone. I want to change and I need a change. Some advice would be really helpful. If you did read all of this, thank you so much. Stay safe, everyone.",0.6927664391195307,2.4497203698453625,2.4590080802451943,96.11028838116472,81.77061855670105,5.740986347171915,18.605043187517413,6.766488616294105,-0.1439403872945113,2781,63,670,30,74,918,263,776,0.153,0.71,0.13699999999999998,0.6829999999999999,0,1,1,0,1,0,109.0,6,2,0,15,43,52,3,12,13,0,61,15,4,9,13,144,147,47,2,22,25,9,28,9,3,5,9,3,1,1,45,32,1,3,38,1,0,9,20,21,1,1,18,33,115,31,91,118,30,81,2,5,1,3,75,36,1,14,41,428,160,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038924938830273405,0.07062017670942791,0.0,0.039887602522019575,0.041255602696715056,0.0,0.03185492037901192,0.06628950250012045,0.0,0.0,0.02708821807702469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03950423360762687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045316477465471516,0.0,0.030629584282525813,0.0,0.02428219653530107,0.0,0.03389546487793561,0.0,0.12540873608230624,0.17614793760590752,0.0,0.044246156494971565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04061301615435055,0.0,0.08427734693902596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04407512746406484,0.04375534582079538,0.07706814168051261,0.0,0.0,0.04043027166555673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154276740468995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04115876325964399,0.08885000060229213,0.05261944225301625,0.10809533160940928,0.06712306223887714,0.03806271762717218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4833856342226253,0.1991999529257495,0.038246508566379435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232603570377904,0.0,0.020811415097709042,0.03821202461544148,0.13583013775666025,0.0334105388750153,0.03185857363966304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07044945258225138,0.0,0.03568308691699565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009887946776781,0.04208639182482343,0.039956354717309545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03540593931456716,0.04406998327162295,0.04148057095665938,0.10945754077373276,0.0,0.044934042671521734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02813565398367364,0.17514619065352702,0.0,0.035173803941238584,0.0,0.0,0.044563616145352966,0.04348308650445922,0.0,0.0359513846818347,0.0,0.05317848272334462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040220586841399834,0.32656846595266176,0.0,0.0,0.17569370262913733,0.029536114167701587,0.030722132661553513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805695293742776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026992282371740263,0.0,0.0,0.046736154087858965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034781168362493224,0.08323528037492879,0.0,0.03765563309111896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04004377621154327,0.0,0.0,0.03984438560491138,0.1360180931658327,0.07655528412981097,0.0,0.039330880427536616,0.0,0.0,0.03401768193272258,0.03789088117219637,0.031677282347081184,0.1994019435011217,0.04031373595291363,0.03174222675975801,0.03626301891632017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09885231169926896,0.044774642180175205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03066585604305775,0.11818936482403992,0.044590460764849085,0.056388862791065475,0.04245732403577958,0.0,0.03330267830148051,0.09125852232841004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05989982881547445,0.2881506931666679,0.0,0.03667343265126072,0.0,0.0,0.026463677882548543,0.07657129906856464,0.0,0.03162343375894994,0.09290918412042813,0.09156574082400487,0.0,0.03806271762717218,0.0,0.05408880754365955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047914923514117976,0.0,0.0,0.13146758686662985,0.1409693574631003,0.03161806239296664,0.03195211605958245,0.048506600951699015,0.035815195676564715,0.0,0.0,0.0889455972638647,0.13742004338040514,0.0,0.0,0.11599735852626808,0.0404529605286617,0.0,0.08488995260059948,0.0,0.0,0.0256515363100399
mentalhealth,ShiteTalkPodcast,2020/03/24,"My intense ongoing battle with anxiety and depression Hi guys, I'm an avid sufferer of anxiety and depression, I think one of the biggest problems with these conditions is feeling so alone, and there's so many symptoms that people never talk about so that leads to us sufferers feeling even more alone and in general just weird, I'm sorry if this isn't welcome here but I started a podcast and my first episode is talking about my personal weird symptoms and I really hope I help just one person not feel alone, keep smiling guys let's kill the stigma and not ourselves 💜
https://youtu.be/sx_O-6gGrX8",7.615530799475755,8.839340330275228,7.046159895150722,72.27954128440369,63.12844036697248,10.632241153342072,38.507208387942335,10.608840637214634,4.49358872870249,492,25,78,12,7,153,74,109,0.275,0.588,0.13699999999999998,-0.9122,0,3,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,2,10,11,2,0,4,0,4,2,0,1,1,25,13,12,1,3,6,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,4,9,0,1,4,0,0,1,4,9,0,3,0,3,8,2,8,12,1,6,0,4,0,0,10,2,0,2,3,52,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45975436488673405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22639204963967066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548912918787897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773225401478187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244530042896551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258625168449593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930255222179594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918062854412653,0.0,0.0,0.14696679222799078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315218142406243,0.1637059845225765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130852129835107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500175332872266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412296081426683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005355043110456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258320481559836,0.2584019773519536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415865305031161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479285164562418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656393930270742,0.1047333537934867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307593288187033,0.0,0.2378640588032711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948126817818538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798871578545455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CornDOdoubleG,2020/03/24,"Brother struggling with anger, depression and cutting. Threatened to hurt me today. It’s hard to write everything about his situation, but I’m writing this because I don’t know how to help. I feel completely powerless and I don’t know how to make sure I’m being supportive but also not tolerating behaviors that are destructive or hurtful to others.

Long story short, my youngest brother (18) has been a cutter for several years. Sometimes it’s better, sometimes it’s intensely worse. He has a girlfriend who is abusive that my parents banned him from seeing, though he is not innocent in their predicament either and often antagonizes her. She is unstable and has caused havoc. This year he threatened to kill himself. I don’t know if he intended to act on it. But his friend called the police which I was so thankful for. He was sent to a state ward on a mandatory psych hold for 1 week. My family has him in therapy 2x a week (all our insurance will allow) and he has been prescribed an antidepressant and anti anxiety meds but he doesn’t seem to take them seriously or has trouble being consistent.

Today he had an outburst I guess I would call it. I don’t know what he was upset over. He was screaming and threatening my mom, threatened to physically hurt me (older sister, 25), to damage my car, and he said a racist slur against my husband. He threw objects at me that hit me and told our family he won’t come home tonight. Made some cryptic joke about the law meaning nothing. I don’t know how to phrase things, but he often makes empty threats for shock value. However, I never want to brush it off because I know he is in pain and what if he means it this time.

Overall: I need help. I’m crushed that he would say he would hurt me. We have always had a good relationship and I do so much to support him. I’m heartbroken that he said those horrible things and did hit me. My whole family (he’s the youngest of 4 kids, and my parents) don’t push hard because they don’t want to trigger, but as a result he keeps having bad behaviors that go unmatched. He’s got zero regard for others and it’s infuriating. 

Does anyone have experience with loved ones suffering from depression with outbursts? I genuinely feel that he’s bipolar however I am not qualified to speak on that. It just seems to be the only thing that makes sense of his behavior. It’s like his normal and what I saw today are separate people. Yet tomorrow he may move on like it didn’t happen. He never apologizes or thinks he was wrong. 

TLDR: I think brother is bipolar and I don’t know how to help. He threatened to hurt me and I don’t know how to handle this. All advice is welcomed, thank you in advance friends.",3.9184539355992847,5.848637232692307,4.942817531305902,81.16404293381038,72.82692307692307,8.14490161001789,29.016100178890877,8.841846274778883,2.451741949910556,2131,88,396,43,43,697,258,520,0.27699999999999997,0.617,0.106,-0.9988,5,0,0,0,2,0,59.0,3,1,3,2,16,37,5,2,14,0,49,4,0,14,5,91,97,38,1,9,16,8,4,2,3,6,3,5,1,1,35,22,0,3,16,1,0,9,17,23,0,2,19,12,51,14,47,67,6,37,0,9,2,1,74,12,0,12,17,250,86,2,0.0,0.08779753818591271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241061506848337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059258522862670776,0.061657947229505926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566870429819907,0.0,0.0,0.051813124589759306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187121884910868,0.1355137995721749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553629055503389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513307607352336,0.0,0.0,0.07612211328436426,0.0,0.06383142853525747,0.07769346236189494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12764612221555846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484626250040161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066597178189639,0.07248497232315046,0.2095674129785753,0.0,0.07493535879818912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145004587983393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042113291698342235,0.06215238205661015,0.05926531888749966,0.0,0.0816305780798901,0.0,0.06552724738967748,0.0,0.13275983720710488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490049644996871,0.0,0.07432931965777886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3966331311637569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658643512331294,0.08198174976383328,0.0,0.3257916632159871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240398671129987,0.0,0.0,0.06557703097264841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687902295046502,0.07011613414538125,0.14838892846549348,0.0,0.0,0.16143537024185167,0.08230947825473454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867861662259133,0.0,0.07875760930093424,0.05447274272546231,0.054944933964876194,0.11430248005982575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260322228399894,0.07110188393939648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050212738346547714,0.05635713053600212,0.07884866181021845,0.0,0.1645607267542763,0.0,0.0,0.05137228581893799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955671553640664,0.0,0.0,0.14097399218167422,0.05892806944287875,0.0,0.0,0.0590488831167986,0.13491748903808598,0.0,0.0837130096430752,0.0,0.0,0.08329260050670123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14657551788377024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746642802130697,0.0,0.0,0.16817781638058685,0.06983929190258441,0.0,0.05571471115135088,0.0,0.0,0.13644444383224413,0.08474092277228089,0.0,0.14768818526383026,0.09496182531074099,0.07280383161675592,0.0,0.0432088743736114,0.0,0.21071717944207533,0.07080665705293243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741334978260851,0.0,0.11887866473996865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273109218736845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551522405552279,0.1579176195432606,0.08101778349691628,0.0,0.09543719669082272
mentalhealth,vovonutcake,2020/03/24,"Don't wanna go home. 
I live with my parents in a VERY small apartment, Along my with emotionally abusive brother. He's mentally unstable; ptsd and depression and anxeity makes him very unpredictable. He can get very angry and break things in the house and thinks this is normal so won't get help because my father was the same way.
I was once like himtoo , but started therapy and has helped but I bad anxeity  and symptoms of BPD. I want to be Alone,I was about to find a place then this whole quarantine thing happened. I work but hours have been cut so spending more time at home. 
How do I handle my anxiety??
I feel trapped.",3.927107438016528,5.856495966942152,4.439743801652893,84.78325206611572,72.80165289256199,8.145785123966942,28.62892561983471,8.841846274778883,2.2967150413223134,496,20,96,10,10,157,87,121,0.201,0.774,0.026000000000000002,-0.9681,1,3,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,1,0,4,0,12,1,0,2,0,21,21,13,0,3,3,3,1,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,4,9,0,0,3,0,1,1,2,3,0,0,4,1,12,1,11,15,3,13,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,5,59,16,1,0.0,0.18591870028715432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003959988054423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13101753000466304,0.0956539708971597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976290389524284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515072079105114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17650833477351374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793409747082538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14341753221065798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16396329641685675,0.0,0.08917845100383323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875947913581024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21035372903398306,0.0,0.31479722073164,0.0,0.1545297368794748,0.1810589242052658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666077764315464,0.0,0.13855888258075666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474202841120456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15813348482975467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374345343394002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16710942954597893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17423561678733726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639428516078776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18342532100770725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106529494765972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630948405594641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17944605906369807,0.0,0.20849480155792846,0.10054484159500936,0.0,0.0,0.09149843982415587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884141013492699,0.09255257445211948,0.12455187962771799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17519007310025286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142360405955082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,katyjo422,2020/03/24,"Experiencing Limerence I have always become obsessed easily with books, shows, movies, ect. So I assumed it was just the same thing with a person. But after reading about limerence today, I have realized it is 100% what I am experiencing, and I feel like I am losing my mind. I developed what I thought was just a crush on an older man about a month ago. We are friends, see each other frequently at the dog park, and text sometimes. But I have felt myself spiraling out of control. I stare at our texts waiting for him to reply, go to the park every day hoping he will come, obsess over every word he says to me. The thing that really made me realize this is limerence and not just an intense crush, was when he told me all about how he cheated on his wife. And while I can acknowledge that cheating is bad, it did not stop for a second my obsession with him. If anything, I find myself routing for him to get divorced, and not because I think his wife deserves better. I feel myself doing everything I can just for a spec of attention. I know I need to cut off communication, go to a different dog park, etc. But I can't stop chasing the high I get when he pays me attention, even if it comes with an extremely low low when he doesn't.",6.659240265906931,6.014756810699595,7.239094650205761,76.45490028490029,65.2551440329218,10.2752769863881,33.095599873377644,9.661875296680813,2.9288312124089906,967,35,189,17,13,320,140,243,0.125,0.804,0.07200000000000001,-0.873,1,0,0,0,1,0,30.0,2,0,0,3,13,14,3,3,14,0,19,0,0,3,1,51,37,16,0,4,12,2,3,1,1,1,0,1,0,2,12,14,0,4,13,3,1,4,5,10,0,1,8,8,35,4,27,28,4,27,0,3,2,0,21,10,0,4,14,136,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377891010468695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12933939539571282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791472950076527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978677361010274,0.0947554137625337,0.17167241363464944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747496596528794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26779738038518563,0.0,0.0,0.17434034107545293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10024660992852802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624028003418244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733578458940509,0.10266733932800867,0.0,0.26193155657094863,0.0,0.1397003816887772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719131817091234,0.11104710831196876,0.14924777249500334,0.0,0.14207029230425733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009336005287895,0.0,0.16242305309574506,0.0,0.1766814476035719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423199051764922,0.0,0.15438802348033365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542632912443686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594063933576232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17389876078421634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470820681735008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695113670578426,0.0,0.12407155320931372,0.0,0.0,0.11525755978579952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13572511838215093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15548310214105218,0.0,0.09957950897457978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236129520369631,0.0,0.0,0.1238663819392296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373516079228255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25991133522618226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065362368510463,0.09960034045284384,0.0,0.12340282091305566,0.0,0.0,0.14733992839064086,0.14853057269534478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,King_Vegeta9000,2020/03/24,"The lockdown in UK has me scared I'm sorry if my post just ends up being rambling but I'm struggling to think properly with everything that's going on.

So a few hours ago it was announced that the UK was going on lockdown and when I found out I broke down in tears to my girlfriend while on the phone to her, we had just made plans to see each other one last time before we were gonna self isolate and hearing how upset she was over not getting that last day just broke me. I've had to stay at home for long periods of time before and it's never been good for me, when I left school I was stuck at home for almost a year and I was that depressed I was having mental breakdowns nearly every week, I fell out with friends and pushed everyone away from me and I even made a suicide note, the only thing that stopped me was an offer I got to go on a college course for people who don't have anything lined up after college so I decided to give it a try and the first month was a bit rocky, I got with a girl that cheated on me multiple times and tried to manipulate people into hating me but it didn't work and a girl I became good friends with stood by me and helped me through it all and now me and her are dating and I honestly couldn't be happier with anyone else but her ex was also in our class and he was jealous of how happy we were and he even threatened to stab me just for looking at him. Eventually we got through all that and we were finally able to be happy, I had a routine that was getting me out of the house and I had friends and a girlfriend to talk to and socialises with, i felt as if after struggling to be happy for most my life I was finally beginning to be happy and actually started to accept myself for the way I am but now I can't see my friends (alot of them just removed me from social media and/or are ignoring me) and I can't see my girlfriend either, I'm constantly arguing with my mum and step dad because they keep talking down to me and making me feel useless, I've been trying to talk to what few friends I have left and I've been desperately trying to make time for my girlfriend but slowly the feelings I had when I left school are coming back and with nothing to do I feel like I'm losing myself in the sheer nothingness of my day to day life and with my parents financial situation we are struggling to feed ourselves, we had to talk about eating half sized portions and having bowls of rice for dinner, our local food bank closed down because they can't get supplies from the shops becwof all the panic buying. I hope to god that this virus is delt with as soon as possible",5.3958022544669655,5.1503585334572515,6.005152896030701,82.91946696246552,67.75464684014871,8.651972658592157,30.18011752008634,8.049812674583475,1.9159855378342725,2073,69,428,23,31,676,247,538,0.165,0.738,0.096,-0.9902,1,4,0,0,0,1,18.0,9,0,3,4,21,31,4,6,23,0,47,6,0,7,4,92,85,46,1,4,14,4,4,1,9,1,2,1,2,3,19,51,4,3,8,1,3,8,9,16,0,3,34,9,69,15,85,44,11,76,0,5,4,0,47,29,0,6,37,311,88,6,0.07313377578011973,0.0,0.07136801548741048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482867958954841,0.0,0.07323291229176583,0.0,0.0,0.0584850540688563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05113683647044398,0.0749341958365073,0.06018286606549617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871158976210588,0.056235359296342366,0.0,0.0891633418247915,0.0,0.1244629132635474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984314167003015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06299827212751108,0.0,0.07903163036847702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414957055155844,0.0,0.06299001391544569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483411049020153,0.061093885343151064,0.0,0.06477481808649206,0.0,0.0,0.09660833832340518,0.0,0.06161836032863606,0.06988245683701266,0.06572792197808677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093590337556336,0.052246784030136884,0.07021989365647444,0.16022895323280492,0.0,0.06220755231816316,0.08843365196971653,0.08018741032161843,0.2825148687577291,0.0,0.11462813807949752,0.07015658175014669,0.1246908304330988,0.1226822826317487,0.1754752841667716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3114090569398889,0.0,0.07220446265050245,0.0,0.0,0.08242708050511907,0.0,0.04902002831158348,0.0,0.1467182801421107,0.07263834099088651,0.07202203746613531,0.08438655812156408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500466020738915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922757659164678,0.0,0.0,0.23838018411492,0.0,0.1033130973123987,0.035729468716462334,0.0,0.0,0.06472109017969457,0.061413952443203475,0.08181798820259897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840189388774055,0.0976347264526116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07370164473872129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837468209077156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05640527643589315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017383028986507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049557339185602865,0.05562153201493292,0.0,0.08580672832570474,0.08120640320497156,0.0,0.0,0.1014035034495936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244734364035268,0.07004194115450976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321966784623851,0.14803057103085332,0.17483445190465693,0.0,0.0762944780225032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220542816194185,0.0,0.07455067445427739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186727443543232,0.05176446291464689,0.07795087422310938,0.0,0.06114311126588444,0.0,0.2293659044715062,0.0,0.07999648061131888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351286348554809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04858683096384045,0.04686117050746263,0.0,0.0,0.1705795711345335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19861213251031296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058050187117199274,0.058663503569460686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05324225978699284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04709575381737146
mentalhealth,justacrumbpls,2020/03/24,"Weed, COVID-19, and my depression/anxiety Hi there. This is my first post on reddit and I want some kind of answer (hopefully) to what has been going on with me recently. Backstory is short, I’ve smoked pot since I was 16 (19 now), and basically all of 2020 I’ve not been sober from it. There’d be some days where I wouldn’t eat as much as I smoked. Concurrently, in January, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I always knew I had it, just never had the title. Also, I tried LSD for the first time in January, but it wasn’t a bad trip. Maybe helps explain some things.

I went to school in Ohio, 2,000+ miles away from my home in California. It was easy to smoke when I wasn’t around my mom or stepdad, because I was never worried about being caught or the conversation that would proceed my mom seeing my eyes red or why I had 60 dollars one day and none the next. So, I had to come home for my spring break, which was about a week before craziness ensued with the virus and I was all set to go back to Ohio no problem. That was 3 weeks ago now, and I have been in quarantine for about a week and a half.

3 days ago, I packed my bong and all was well. I smoked, I felt the come up, and I walked to my room no issue. I then felt something I had never felt before when smoking, and it felt like my entire body collapsed. My head didn’t feel normal, and I felt like my ears were about to pop but almost like they kept expanding. I was worried I was going to have a heart attack because it felt like my heart was beating so incredibly fast. I tried talking myself down, but I kept going over how horrible of a person I am and all these extremely negative thoughts. My head, my chest, my hands, nothing felt the way it should. I came down and everything seemed to be alright, I munched, and took a nap. Woke up normal.

I went to Long Beach to help a friend move out of her dorm and we smoked her dab pen, and nothing was wrong. I was high and fine. The following night, I did the same thing. I pulled my bong out of the bag, put indica in this time (thought sativa was the issue), and proceeded as followed. I went back to my room, and the same thing from the night before happened again, except this time magnified tenfold. I felt like God was mad at me and I was going to die, so I sat on the floor and tried talking myself out of it. Once I said I would quit, like magic, I started to come down enough to where I could control it. I smoked today to test if it would happen with a smaller dosage, and it did. I don’t know what is going on in my brain, but I hope someone can help me, because I’m truly scared of my potential psychosis. Thanks for reading",3.7416499925339717,4.446423064456724,4.562979443531933,88.48725548753174,71.57826887661142,7.7855557214673246,25.35707530735155,7.917944638633933,1.1626587924941516,2056,58,453,26,37,664,254,543,0.098,0.78,0.122,0.8521,2,1,7,0,0,0,77.0,1,0,1,5,22,21,2,1,23,1,48,12,10,2,7,92,94,42,1,13,11,2,10,6,1,5,1,2,5,1,23,36,1,3,16,3,1,22,13,7,1,4,52,15,73,14,66,33,12,92,0,1,3,0,17,31,0,11,41,305,96,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127326880751158,0.0,0.06367354009436693,0.0,0.0,0.05085077622391991,0.052909764292638974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728828861135136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05660621768309624,0.0,0.07233978385239588,0.0597424030910357,0.097789485432751,0.05309277640430544,0.11628676457675753,0.0,0.16232443958478082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063120472204204,0.0,0.07098450578128229,0.0,0.07272698196116335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16432459999155075,0.0,0.0,0.07131861351894225,0.050769320235000456,0.0,0.0,0.12302572977615026,0.0,0.05476768642779794,0.06453981591151872,0.06599362418541642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506572776650167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06570272457966736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05714820487702624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0321516718391428,0.0,0.4884305784638782,0.0,0.0,0.10817472507230476,0.0,0.0,0.04912742443296955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21682891865204504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246015704117236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051792030123924,0.0,0.0,0.15070261819673594,0.127863769462937,0.06718352038846602,0.12756658175747088,0.12631316091990374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327373337743771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621643395308167,0.03494594144754425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18639338688082396,0.0,0.0,0.056272798684960636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388203401993398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14894545813479407,0.0,0.06758328377124555,0.04674401447796741,0.0,0.14712743976502413,0.0,0.06762586199345792,0.11934483010915732,0.124604192988578,0.12202754353767305,0.0,0.0,0.06771844636072682,0.043088430117771255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05552201632162693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060899098626867224,0.0,0.0,0.06084450078963074,0.0,0.06392284391442185,0.0,0.06763296773168108,0.06360455188925421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278483121333273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06048612573786201,0.0,0.06366202449698151,0.06435378714813768,0.05067088068670427,0.0578875300323312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052600108257777264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387735043500302,0.048952644200859284,0.0,0.0,0.045007449543007415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022181973260647,0.0,0.0585426833570413,0.0,0.0,0.1267338181407612,0.0,0.0,0.10096249711977448,0.11123487536562028,0.0,0.060273367276785,0.0,0.07064787914450092,0.12951489829025675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03750546313042477,0.05047267411906667,0.1530177960856303,0.0,0.05717265901455024,0.17683831552460294,0.057377687807671066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12915206937973506,0.0,0.1355118748372822,0.06952277882975906,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kino45,2020/03/24,"How to learn about yourself when you don't trust yourself? Hello everyone, first time posting here. There is so much backstory to my current situation so to say it directly I started therapy months ago because I had anxiety attacks and overall sadness ( not sure if depression but I think not quite or at least not the hard one that some people sadly suffer). The sadness and anxiety themselves started like 4 or 5 years ago or so when I was heading towards the end of highschool. My problems go on the lines of not trusting people, being paranoid and the two ones mentioned earlier. 

Now the question. My therapist suggested me cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) and years prior to that I read some self-help books and made my own ""analysis"" of why this was happening to me. The problem is that I feel like maybe the problem was not that big in the beginning but overanalyzing it, reading all that amount of self-help books and making CBT exercises made me kind of lose the person I was and I don't know who I am anymore, I don't trust my thoughts, my decisions or even my body (headaches, lack of focus...). So how would you go to the root of the problem if you can't trust the path? I'm asking here because my therapist can't seem to find a solution so I kind of started losing interest in wasting my time on that. I feel like I need to find a way to get very deep into my mind to find what is causing this amount of trouble. Any kind of advice will be welcome, even disagreements on my points. Thanks in advance.",5.650575149213238,6.514188714776632,6.116491228070178,78.48947368421055,67.35051546391753,9.287827816965097,35.247060951347436,9.414487439383343,3.3168652920962214,1200,58,221,23,19,388,156,291,0.20199999999999999,0.713,0.085,-0.9886,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,3,0,5,16,27,1,0,15,0,18,3,2,7,2,52,39,24,0,9,13,0,3,3,0,2,1,1,0,1,12,8,0,0,12,5,0,3,10,13,0,4,8,4,30,14,30,27,9,35,0,7,0,0,12,12,0,10,21,151,42,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947429909788926,0.1623301411158766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062265976494420464,0.0,0.14009088125956656,0.0,0.0908058874248684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559904031932418,0.10416612538527344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163190390750308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170584615239316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406041815177298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07886307350793105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109763631859232,0.0,0.0,0.12095298941995584,0.0,0.0,0.08749236566053159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925940029617988,0.1308252439839941,0.0,0.0,0.2510607561436866,0.0778834368539932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04783788581459585,0.0,0.10407472036663236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08096885417228351,0.0,0.08202245880124925,0.0,0.09397004889359876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227454910959886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860463078986905,0.050320627525772696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341991631356709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048711412114932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17327823972157202,0.06111901022513505,0.0,0.09198733547731436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245252337149942,0.0,0.07308470912399306,0.0,0.06730933676907476,0.06789280067345899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409091029247525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269565038871361,0.07994927556878845,0.0,0.0,0.08655662614156225,0.0,0.08769203895273026,0.0,0.0,0.35045368181852177,0.0,0.0,0.10257150968377762,0.09738851599683228,0.1831755466864241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281456877015527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833555118701379,0.1910403460654745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292064282742576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944262776040768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629703927479034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842989040083779,0.20942052937369154,0.21262338904822836,0.0,0.05866987010605373,0.0,0.07269079042071551,0.10678223754158768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944374158560407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554906020709061,0.0,0.07267844360088749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262136136162908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504372464579097,0.0,0.0,0.11792713366269175
mentalhealth,youngboymelly7,2020/03/24,I feel like everyone is trying to listen to me but they are not anybody no why i feel like this Please,-1.3386363636363647,0.4682328636363664,1.036818181818184,97.42522727272728,106.72727272727272,4.0181818181818185,14.590909090909092,5.985473137389443,-0.5722181818181817,81,2,18,1,4,27,18,22,0.0,0.598,0.402,0.868,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,2,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,12,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3509795043575849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3714449486039813,0.5248112671809471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3588972623075242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4031949974626453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24937871027651085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314392546267025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bayero99,2020/03/24,Being home Ever since I got back from school nothing feels real and it’s making it hard for this whole COVID seriousness and anything else to resonate with me so it’s hard to deal with everyone else’s stress and idk nothing feels real,2.06246376811594,4.8819723478260855,2.791304347826088,88.70550724637683,86.3913043478261,4.8057971014492775,20.71014492753623,6.42735559955562,0.4518666666666671,192,6,35,2,6,60,33,46,0.18100000000000002,0.8190000000000001,0.0,-0.6369,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,11,5,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,2,0,6,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,20,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043319900250946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991008535800165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009923562965959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3257235191965576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17634998719862652,0.0,0.18628999975367486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19715247906168526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559251163728896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34928679124225404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19555800989710734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13013547312187373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37413346407963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.443808046683271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19730713750656434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16127064548644465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22332286239519447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21766279873493674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Created4thispost1998,2020/03/24,"Crying when talking through frustration I'm 22 now and whenever I'm mentally frustrated, not even to an extreme extent, if I try to talk, I become a child and cry.

I can take pain fine and I don't cry at all...

I'm in the military, been in for a couple of years and I deploy to a super simple and lax location. I don't know why, but 4 times I was late, I changed nothing, went to bed at a reasonable hour, couldn't sleep and eventually did but then overslept. That part is irrelevant, but there I am, sitting and waiting to be talked to about me being late. I'm frustrated, but I'm stone faced. Door opens, they talk, I'm breathing and preparing, it's my turn, I go to speak and... lump forms in the back of my throat, I try to breath and remain calm... All that happens is a grown man can't hold tears in, in a stupid situation that you shouldn't cry over.

I can't go through life crying and breaking down whenever I hit a speed bump in my life it's embarrassing... Please help, this was always a struggle in life but it hadn't happened in a while and I thought I was over it...",1.664285714285711,3.396921142857142,3.4226428571428578,90.47235714285715,78.64285714285714,6.98,24.146428571428572,7.908726449838941,1.1417025,832,29,188,14,20,278,126,224,0.155,0.787,0.057999999999999996,-0.9668,0,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,1,1,1,6,10,4,2,12,0,18,10,5,1,2,29,35,21,0,3,7,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,2,2,8,13,0,2,3,0,0,4,8,7,0,0,8,1,21,3,27,22,5,31,0,0,0,0,10,14,0,1,11,116,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420398207159897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705537678779075,0.0,0.0,0.1250371159285835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976649968177848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527028747638164,0.6218070218932977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477746562680378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12868543162358667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20023137050999326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758856542967021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149400816661263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06222002470832421,0.0,0.2554229910067469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23990139103360034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409413103948272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863288352678896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046878394914914,0.0,0.0,0.12260085471491028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242761151895586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640391622278247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725844757081473,0.11329680173470068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835694057906918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512361968344159,0.3639918399574289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988009487218901,0.06601659980139235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373115995576567,0.12314545211897222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495147557964778,0.10215896339375004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290677333581069
mentalhealth,WreckItRauf,2020/03/24,"Social anxiety Does anyone else experience hyper focus on behaviors and gestures of others in social settings and extrapolate far-fetched implications about what they might signify? Another way to try to explain it...in a movie, the director might write in for an actor to make a small gesture, change in tone of voice, even for a split second, that can have implications about the story line. Do you think it’s a form of anxiety?",12.56774891774892,9.467593480519485,11.890129870129876,55.53138528138532,55.753246753246756,15.461471861471862,45.14718614718615,13.5591,6.162830303030303,346,15,54,10,3,114,58,77,0.052000000000000005,0.948,0.0,-0.4137,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,7,0,5,0,0,1,0,8,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,14,6,1,7,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,2,0,37,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23709257907897086,0.3459419979499411,0.0,0.0,0.15809905489606385,0.23167302396572184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23919089735138516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978674881321838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18888312612500585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14934133628736904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22117572930010915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15092797132762875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4797269335093178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.460974592352723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14488003716919834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15351160048256526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17947296612830893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dia_Cee2,2020/03/24,"What is it like to be admitted into a mental health institution? Title pretty much says it all. I'm a 21F living in the states. I've hit a new low and I think it's time to get some help. I've been wanting to get help for some time but I've never had the guts to find a therapist. Yesterday was a really bad time for me and it made me realize I really need to seek some professional help. I could speak to a therapist but I think I need to be away from my environment for a while and so I wish to admit myself. In addition, I would also like to know how long I would be staying and if I can opt out at anytime. I'm currently on spring break but I start online classes on the 30th so I'd like to give my profs a heads up.",0.1713607594936697,2.005779727848104,3.1232753164557003,90.25871044303801,84.0,6.987974683544303,18.735759493670887,8.07648339933343,0.6630620253164556,559,14,132,12,16,199,91,158,0.044000000000000004,0.7859999999999999,0.17,0.9468,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,11,0,11,3,2,2,2,32,28,13,0,8,4,0,0,3,0,2,1,2,0,0,5,7,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,2,15,3,23,17,5,24,0,1,0,0,8,10,0,4,14,84,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511836184432396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469962144624555,0.0,0.13063480447617828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491793934042485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299858406831892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634843304397771,0.15008751758767766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605697060307357,0.1663061497147718,0.0,0.0,0.3146088725174181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598450744922274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293105135942234,0.0,0.1381541274189085,0.13845925098279566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14804310703892526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576715487701262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501367239227173,0.2320213126223723,0.1206690478344497,0.1511068502244727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15917270522224006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004603292444504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244206429584508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074085344961247,0.16676201881673508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633165617843841,0.0,0.20050226442804853,0.0,0.0,0.2736934697794688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228221190621776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17991747698377128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22228469322910446,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,0_aRtSy_FaRtSy_0,2020/03/24,"Nothing is Going Right Need Advice For the past few days and in some areas weeks nothing has been going right. I hate my new job, but can’t find a new one no matter how hard I try. All of my art projects, which are supposed to just be for fun, are crashing and burning, and it’s making me doubt my abilities as an artist. I haven’t found the same enjoyment out of hobbies like video games or YouTube or reading. I keep trying to do fun things with my girlfriend, but messing up everything little thing like burning food and making and dropping everything. I feel like I’m falling apart, and I don’t really know what to do",6.115207373271892,5.858677709677418,6.068571428571428,83.10500000000002,66.25806451612902,8.698617511520737,32.23041474654378,7.957251820313856,2.165457603686636,492,18,98,5,7,155,88,124,0.086,0.7170000000000001,0.19699999999999998,0.9538,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,9,1,1,4,0,11,1,0,3,1,27,22,12,0,1,5,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,8,1,1,4,5,0,3,4,3,0,1,2,2,11,6,12,19,4,17,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,4,8,61,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16094605298921616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621993326503988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960492176376264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327888263684016,0.11766399325206765,0.0,0.0,0.15053573360996456,0.0,0.19915975350020332,0.18058854879070285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18720923916531704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14754170900058028,0.1626103034624547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634425039100197,0.1463957646767938,0.0,0.0,0.09051656694569936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413969803497648,0.1650758674342169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21988131916140569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212532989861215,0.0,0.3181427382688552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3160743095282449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160714543045767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722783328925655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16474776299207314,0.0,0.10551308224174896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813112520375315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21884296447303056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22364531189127626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211496585432195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angelnbk,2020/03/24,Will you ever find the right medication? Whenever I get put on a medication I think it’s working till it isn’t. I was first on lexapro which made up and down and unstable emotionally then they switched me onto Prozac which works very well for a couple of days but then I will all of a sudden crash which is what I do off of medication. I told my psychologist and she just doubled my dosage which I didn’t see fix anything. When I get sad I get very unreasonable and turn to self harm or substance abuse so it’s dangerous for me to not be on the right meds. My diagnosis was depression which then manic depressive disorder. I’m honestly confused. Mental illness runs in our family and my sister who has borderline personality disorder said she had to go through a lot of meds till she found the right what. Am I convincing myself they aren’t working? Do you guys experience the same thing? Did you find something that worked for you? I’m just stressed about not being able to find the right medication for me. Thanks for reading and I hope you guys have a good day :).,3.1310869565217416,5.541647458937199,4.293842995169083,82.7123586956522,76.82608695652175,8.197971014492754,26.292028985507244,8.982922981607832,2.232331594202898,852,33,168,21,20,278,122,207,0.213,0.6990000000000001,0.08800000000000001,-0.986,1,0,1,0,1,0,15.0,1,5,2,5,7,13,1,2,10,0,17,6,0,1,2,24,32,15,0,1,6,1,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,4,13,6,0,0,5,1,0,3,5,7,1,1,9,2,30,6,25,19,4,26,0,3,1,0,19,12,0,4,11,119,43,5,0.10284491232730636,0.12185440378334145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463259989093158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137959393486688,0.0,0.13265292060759334,0.0,0.17716034457476534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357383591848829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568668382146086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930291111823982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006020586475478,0.09695303037938337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819951600234273,0.08747982988725897,0.0,0.11276413799658312,0.0,0.0,0.16119666577139755,0.0,0.05844913373754284,0.0862614330163288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036652649162317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10214820349586602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743506669180742,0.0,0.09731434273004612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284750257395687,0.4144217173449097,0.10364348224439043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980021053100988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338754284433307,0.0,0.0,0.10287274362117768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3513159727698625,0.0978290628712164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195407974917708,0.0,0.10728967319932756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917503805737093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780849959424193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468577762124236,0.0,0.0,0.06832558988559916,0.06589886712378709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827272105063424,0.0,0.0,0.11186573195209636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697156469211391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246992735968794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994892842050925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mikey-1331-,2020/03/24,Idk if this belongs here but I can’t stop overthinking I’m constantly overthinking everything it’s causing problems in my relationship it causes me to write super sloppy and not be able to focus on one thing for to long I overthink if someone’s mad at me just how they look at me or if ppl look at me too often everything idk how to stop it,2.9069047619047623,4.7625580714285745,4.637142857142859,82.59619047619049,75.42857142857143,8.095238095238095,27.380952380952376,8.841846274778883,2.2498095238095246,275,11,54,6,6,93,49,70,0.207,0.725,0.068,-0.836,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,1,1,6,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,17,5,8,0,4,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,2,8,1,10,4,0,9,0,0,2,0,3,5,0,5,4,39,13,0,0.2252666231924077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4628217491316237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24343319223697016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4049102312992435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19935387279804995,0.3783344572656471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526464938212064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155497354731466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418520496283293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19086767881310446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37666596752105774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965713483399662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mourning_star85,2020/03/24,"Question about bipolar, and how to help someone seemingly in a manic episode. My best friend( mid 20s) who had a psychological break yesterday. They said she may be bipolar(her mother is), listening to her speaking today she sounds incredibly manic.She is going to a doctor this week to evaluate her medication

She has social anxiety, anxiety and depression. Which was already medicated. But since two months ago when she had a traumatic event happen ( cat who was her world was hit by a car and killed and it was graphic, and destroyed her) I was starting to notice changes in behavior. The normal ups and downs of depression were getting more extreme. 

  I didn't put two and two together until today, but now everything makes more
 sense. How do I help her through this? 
   A few days ago she was extremely down and now despite the psychological break  which was triggered by 2 days of no sleep she is as high as can be, which is out of character.
 Today  She was taking a mile a minute, mentioning how things happening right now are God's plan. What scares me the most is she seems to have attached onto this girl who she has been talking to for about a week, they were ""dating"" but broke up after two days.She is talking about how she loves her and she is her soulmate and she will come around when the time is right and they are meant to be together.  After 20 minutes she was exhausted and went back to bed.
   
How do I approach this? What can I say to help her see she is maybe being unrealistic without coming across as dismissing her feeling which to her they are. She is one of the most important people in the world to me and I want to help her, but how can I help her when her thoughts are grandiose? How can I be supportive without encouraging the thoughts. 

   Does anyone have any suggestions?",5.1454437869822485,6.747912337278109,5.392859171597632,80.47906390532545,69.11834319526629,8.839952662721895,30.383905325443788,9.281916038205594,2.669242224852072,1422,57,265,29,25,450,171,338,0.086,0.807,0.107,0.8894,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,4,2,18,12,2,1,16,0,46,7,1,9,0,44,69,31,1,2,6,1,1,0,1,2,5,5,1,1,15,17,0,0,7,0,0,7,4,7,0,5,20,7,43,5,43,41,6,52,0,3,1,1,55,18,0,6,25,206,58,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17384852546643295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821163513962367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668415443904184,0.0,0.15003124478825947,0.0,0.0,0.06856582359605888,0.0,0.0,0.08729417921695465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540207786616962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029079075527498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10373446498057727,0.16893999362076434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264811598789309,0.0,0.16891784789761147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003685528435185,0.08581295628608063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812999424181804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04958207628998623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576090345636508,0.0,0.05123229643694114,0.0,0.055729750955969486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342824702542442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286377145982123,0.1036057611559517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084888478915289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850296765936964,0.0,0.06545580341744896,0.0,0.09851443807285104,0.0,0.0,0.1975702428891799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827054684982764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607796810258433,0.0,0.11164194623968474,0.0,0.0,0.0664479856600836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798244875360801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857737225904226,0.10984962860755283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674853878693401,0.09327750406960894,0.07798123827249967,0.09817515465996574,0.0,0.07814111454167988,0.17854026034239573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111623537173361,0.0,0.09813080571935434,0.09995980874870136,0.08308590958926207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940736419629352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112773122835446,0.0,0.0,0.07372890723644822,0.15763380776596436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514669875763028,0.0,0.0,0.1556973540805347,0.057179567562132064,0.0,0.2788482082229031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3831614382878673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783832155067072,0.0,0.15731561492253138,0.0,0.0,0.0909025912680428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890526582461536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LaughAndTearGas,2020/03/24,"I think I have mental problems. And I enjoy one of them So this is copied from a post I made in 
r/confessions. I wanted to get anything: people who experience the same thing, people who at least cared, random strangers opinions on what the hell is wrong with me. But no one replied. So now I’m posting it here with some minor revisions.


I’m pretty sure I have mental issues... and I enjoy one of them.

It all started with shadows and noises. A shadow that looked like my cat that disappeared... and reappeared a second later. A frog ribbiting despite it being no where to found. It was pretty scary for someone who was only 4-5 years old. This is likely schizophrenia that I think I have now. Next came the bullying. Kicking me until I was bruised and bleeding and then laughing as they walked away. Making fun of me because I was fat and weird. I guess this triggered my need to give and receive pain.

Now I’m mentally fucked.

I was diagnosed with anxiety 2 years ago, ADD 1 year ago and depression 1 month ago. Also the therapist has thought that schizophrenia might be in there as well.

Let’s get to the juicy stuff now, shall we?

About a year ago I had a sleepover at my house. It was kinda fun. We played a lot of Fortnite (because I had a computer and Xbox and my friend brought his PS4: it was the only fun multiplay game we could play together), watched Netflix, and had a Nerf war with 20+ of my guns. (Guns. Who would have guessed?) Anyway, because I am 300+ pounds they decided they would take turns trying to take me down. As my best friend came at me trying to take me down, I somehow maneuvered behind him and put him in a choke hold. Oh the rush. Seeing that I had the power of his life in my hand, seeing that he was in pain, it was the best feeling I had in years, watching him gasping for air. The other two there had to rip me off of him. After he regained his breath, he laughed. We all did, but for different reasons. Them, because they thought it was a joke, me, because it was an amazing feeling. 

This is where I started to go downhill.

I always felt the urge to pick at my scabs. But now it felt better then ever. The pain was refreshing and the blood was beautiful. Hell, it even tasted kind of good. It was fun. But I know I couldn’t hurt others for this for two reasons: repercussions and the slim chance that a God actually exists. So I hurt in other ways. I make friends only to watch as they realize I don’t care about them. As the hope drains out of their eyes, it fills mine. I manipulate and deceive to get what I want and most don’t even realize it. But when they do, it feels so good. Luckily I haven’t caused any wounds but I have opened some.

I have also had my downsides.

There are voices in my head telling me to do some horrific things, which have caused some problems. The first was in a class, my eyesight became slightly blurry and they started chanting things like “blood”, “death”, and “kill”. My hearing became fuzzy as well. I tried shaking them out as well as clutching my head. The voices ceased and everything came back into focus. The second time, I was playing on my Xbox as my friends were mocking me for some reason. I snapped. I started laughing and laughing for many minutes as my lungs felt like they were on fire and my eyes began to tear up. The voices began as well. I then began muttering words that sounded similar such as: “time rhyme dine fly mine line lime pie tie rye buy lie” on and on. My mother had to come down and shake me out of it.

So this is sort of my story. I guess my username makes some sort of sense. Kinda funny if you think about it.",2.4826623376623367,4.5636519873949615,3.2881945505474945,90.75622612681438,77.44537815126051,5.951922587216705,24.123503947033356,6.91589649932139,0.8211809523809528,2805,95,573,29,66,887,324,714,0.11199999999999999,0.725,0.163,0.9869,2,0,0,2,0,0,102.0,4,1,14,5,33,55,6,2,33,0,56,21,10,12,4,114,111,55,3,11,7,1,8,4,4,4,9,5,0,0,45,43,3,1,19,8,1,14,6,18,4,8,41,22,96,37,85,61,14,85,2,3,8,1,43,32,3,21,40,403,141,2,0.0,0.0,0.06059127607382436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201575815544289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930734469991624,0.05166418873787824,0.0,0.0,0.04222360278844047,0.0,0.047498987871141485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051095110712889816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05833597692626806,0.04774368681775178,0.0,0.18924866494023965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303200932470066,0.054913915181324935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21304463774943816,0.12661060666786886,0.12756789366375593,0.0,0.05348538378967947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495741339577232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05347837258720014,0.06302045142213032,0.0,0.06487125521771292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202025036578836,0.05616432369455891,0.0,0.0,0.05580285004611868,0.06073632774091195,0.0,0.0,0.0941843191522342,0.0,0.1788495700779815,0.0,0.0,0.05281406454480438,0.0,0.06807892139440666,0.1918835634249011,0.05740157648810544,0.09731901766875516,0.0595627717008445,0.035287406545952714,0.10415696731287867,0.0,0.0,0.20519873506346747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12744533184504664,0.0,0.06998039607428952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06166977941680036,0.0,0.0716439879285347,0.13293811986224413,0.0,0.0,0.06480624849085029,0.0,0.0,0.06869383077406949,0.0646575993493361,0.034123261343274404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349164318614264,0.04385628743173957,0.12133693718033305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052140300131047965,0.0,0.0,0.05278703972894847,0.0,0.05875144001427037,0.12433747718386698,0.06294992253844507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18771756533905068,0.06586810485934774,0.0,0.0,0.04955996680204182,0.0,0.0,0.04603924661950454,0.0,0.0,0.06603384733047835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515343256701031,0.0,0.1262221906930581,0.14166764673008328,0.1982056974908261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609133419789672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118930884213478,0.12633652224435865,0.0,0.1188242591696746,0.0,0.06241800387525224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19151782436302447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895602364936663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052608996444878466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17579162552602545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107865572550287,0.0,0.0,0.05851946943261551,0.0,0.14005276602959782,0.0,0.05426974842463851,0.0,0.0,0.07209174277953317,0.12375031314980085,0.11935506823197703,0.0,0.0985856878475871,0.07241082589013782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12646592248315586,0.06753652808063232,0.12130660207218875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324505606014872,0.049284471338226436,0.0,0.0,0.22330691398563046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821448077894264,0.06788610788693589,0.0,0.19992091709181706
mentalhealth,Opal-Roses,2020/03/24,"[Venting/Asking for coping advice] - Hi, everyone! This is my first time making a reddit post in years so I apologize if the tags are inaccurate. But I just kinda wanna vent and ask how to cope with.. more social anxieties/depression?  
Like that irrational feeling that everyone hates you even though nothing in your life indicates that. You are obviously surrounded by loved ones, people who care about you, but theres that dark slimy part of your brain that's constantly telling you, ""You're so annoying"" or, ""You're a piece of shit"".   
Years of medication and treatment has helped me become stable with my depression & anxiety. But naturally there's bad days. Sometimes those bad days are darker than others. I guess what I'm trying to ask is: Does anybody know how to cope with the self-hatred aspect of depression? That little voice that drowns you into feeling self-pity and loathing, the part where your the most toxic person for yourself and the only way of relief is.. well, suicide. And while I feel safe around myself enough to know I will not do it; The feeling is still ugly. Naturally, venting to the ones I love does help. But I hate that I need validation from others to feel ok. It's not fair to other people. And even tho I know venting to people who are open to listen is healthy, it also triggers another irrational anxiety that I'm ruining my friends day if I vent because I don't want to be negative.   
I'm tired of my irrational and Rational side constantly fighting for control.",5.7323381294964015,7.303212701438852,6.130280575539569,75.86894604316551,67.66906474820144,9.444892086330936,30.80647482014389,9.766711354998122,3.109835395683453,1193,47,205,27,20,384,161,278,0.24100000000000002,0.625,0.135,-0.9919,0,0,0,0,2,1,44.0,0,8,0,2,17,19,5,0,9,1,14,7,2,5,1,44,37,22,2,5,10,0,5,1,1,1,3,2,0,1,20,13,0,2,8,0,0,0,4,10,1,3,0,7,25,9,31,35,6,22,0,3,0,2,24,9,1,6,12,141,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659195444983476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790477547484182,0.0,0.10710047260027886,0.0,0.0,0.10364949431280693,0.15123507149977192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879946137487699,0.27722525977301943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16506590773125546,0.06025609524800536,0.10916853081712308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103457256822958,0.0,0.0,0.10078090613209778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21363656182586066,0.11086509762638956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912440367137553,0.0,0.25540982653749833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17300301144402394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213517363051283,0.0,0.13057476574185686,0.0,0.0,0.1889047175288735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498995746987898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407904237134127,0.0,0.0,0.0763687968281611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889090048674784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19518151248072715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250986042254478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16297085791771912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981842206245614,0.04829155628487608,0.099070467226936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17842620263261566,0.0,0.06598101031477653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957775745892704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329365388990419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484617591324472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13396230733806402,0.07517744988781692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140829158886685,0.0,0.2055837871469699,0.08630921797542059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466791601092382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206237551914752,0.0,0.10146482551047144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007618702660819,0.0,0.0,0.09776201827245863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07893918666021868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10812236187138033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639646496827133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711648465695624,0.0,0.05763836726669475,0.11360986211696936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671104925467438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583024069918734,0.07845999336749672,0.0,0.0,0.08887514928378266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273082040093345
mentalhealth,DogIroncutter,2020/03/24,Staying positive amidst the coronavirus I'm having a really hard time staying on top of my mental health these days. I live in New York and the whole state is essentially on lock down I think. My house is too. We all just stay inside 24/7. My depression was pretty manageable before this all happened but now it's just taking a nosedive. I'm trying so hard to stay positive but it's so hard when all I see online is coronavirus this coronavirus that. My suicidal thoughts have even snuck back in lately. I just don't know what to do,3.1081730769230766,5.495576548076925,4.123692307692308,84.0213076923077,76.78846153846155,8.006153846153849,23.861538461538462,8.841846274778883,1.9235915384615392,427,14,81,10,10,138,71,104,0.129,0.773,0.098,-0.5148,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,1,10,1,0,0,4,0,8,1,0,0,3,13,16,6,1,0,5,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,9,0,8,14,4,18,0,1,1,0,1,6,0,0,7,53,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755617383889552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009060536985492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859569947437613,0.0,0.13167631750936828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097656311206073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519230326836204,0.0,0.41085446639077056,0.0,0.0,0.16250552208513885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17640433030628594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840194863403078,0.0,0.17245660544571276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349968635731838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406824939911365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765357521945993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15553509962323714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793958466688846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12182648946798055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6518038924781434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16722717341748528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494760464589834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796007308212758,0.0,0.12137056259267508,0.08914623276426599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379627101188764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706863533913596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,misguidedmisfit,2020/03/24,"Mother in law dropped this off when she visited. What should i do? My wife cut ties with her father for sensitive reasons and now we are stuck with this ""baggage"" she doesnt want to get rid of it but it also upsets her to see it",0.8362499999999997,2.921635124999998,2.4123333333333328,94.86600000000004,83.16666666666666,5.506666666666668,20.016666666666666,6.742157984588678,0.16241166666666684,178,5,40,2,5,58,41,48,0.15,0.85,0.0,-0.6609,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,0,0,3,2,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,9,8,4,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,7,0,8,6,0,6,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,0,2,30,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4654054675468246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040580939653491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5983675753326847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4637589957950709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3432641328209397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,krismith9,2020/03/24,Any Bipolars Struggling With All This? I am just anxious and worried.,3.5500000000000007,6.707287333333337,2.4833333333333343,87.94500000000002,92.33333333333334,2.4000000000000004,39.333333333333336,3.1291,2.2715333333333336,56,4,8,0,2,16,12,12,0.467,0.5329999999999999,0.0,-0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34599663465447084,0.0,0.0,0.574791180446416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.531900833540485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5167039103468576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MegaVoodoo,2020/03/24,"cannabis-oil induced disassociative disorder. need help hello, this is sort of new to me so i'm sorry if i seem a bit confused with my own situation, and because i have been dealing with this for some time, it's hard for me to describe my own feelings anymore. around february of last year i was sort of peer-pressured into taking a hit from a dab pen. (i say sort of, because i took in a very tiny bit into my mouth, but didn't intend to inhale or anything.) i ended up getting extremely high, and because this was my first time, i was honestly extremely taken back and fully committed to the high while i was under the influence. i overall had a good time, and wouldn't consider it a bad trip per say, until after i came down. for the next few days, it constantly felt as if i was under a constant hazy-high, as if i was coming down 24/7. this continued for several months, and after telling my parents, they just brushed it off as i was just thinking about it too much. a couple more months go by, and after convincing my parents that i was still having this feeling i decided to go to my doctor about it. at this point i had started to notice myself distancing myself from my passions which include music and other hobbies i had, because of my sudden detachment from the world. everything i experienced was under this constant muffle it seems, as if there was a constant fog in my brain prohibiting me from seeing a layer of reality that i had moved away from after i had gotten high. my doctor encouraged me to see a therapist, and after seeing her for several months now, she has told me that i have suffered from some sort of trauma that has caused me to disassociate from the world completely. she doesn't seem to care about the fact that this all started after me getting high for the first time, and even my doctor brushed it off. during this time, i was put on 50mg of prestiq, which was then bumped to 100mg before moving me to 150mg of welbutrin, which i am currently on right now. recently my therapist has diagnosed my with disassociation-depersonalization disorder, and has told me to get off the welbutrin and to see a psychiatrist for further evaluation. i feel so alone constantly and seem to have slowly started to lose hope that this will go away any time soon. i have been living with this for the past year and it has started to affect my ability to do math, spell, and even have conversations, and it seems like no one believes me. i'm sorry if this is long and sappy, i just really hope i am not alone with this and need some hope that this has been resolved with someone else that is reading this. *i do not plan on harming myself, i am just tired of feeling so distant and foggy all the time and i want things to be back to how it was before.* anyways, thanks for reading",8.207943051423713,6.745864476979746,8.396988950276242,72.05810985975351,62.609576427255966,11.226774330641732,36.538390706898994,10.125756701596842,3.5558763847570467,2213,85,412,39,26,729,239,543,0.077,0.815,0.10800000000000001,0.9622,3,2,0,0,0,0,57.0,0,0,1,5,23,18,0,1,22,0,46,8,2,6,4,81,90,37,0,12,13,2,6,1,0,2,5,2,0,0,39,30,0,0,14,2,0,10,6,6,0,3,29,16,62,12,87,57,12,88,0,2,4,1,16,29,0,22,50,319,101,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812853848650893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04206427206903176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134463424743381,0.0,0.0,0.050902303367932965,0.0550650470942308,0.0,0.0,0.11623169236098872,0.0951270521344696,0.05164726337014347,0.1508276282463825,0.0,0.10526997770599753,0.06969064749297164,0.0,0.0,0.13506169063845222,0.0,0.0,0.0690518694552214,0.0,0.07074690467984797,0.06306642084034142,0.0635432581775637,0.0,0.05328355675185517,0.06485494851053712,0.33422236989349285,0.0,0.0,0.06844260290041622,0.0,0.03989207005404522,0.0637709274542669,0.0,0.06278264381691813,0.0,0.0,0.14178490900848975,0.1899370314957277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05167283795155942,0.0,0.05478614855685016,0.0,0.0,0.08171074703983244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05559227805188472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510521963450946,0.0,0.0593915604729747,0.0,0.0,0.10522954145884764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695178446094474,0.0,0.10546274866666662,0.051881965554744634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05541091968734908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04146084285027831,0.3267718517123103,0.0,0.18431120571281395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050420980839353036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03021976809481218,0.0,0.054620073364735434,0.05474070581890954,0.0,0.06920115854752151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14811885696291155,0.1314864993976698,0.045471353924629344,0.09173103514446064,0.0,0.05974101099526888,0.06578466867906846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042358473983812,0.0,0.0,0.04191529713104419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13736776732632222,0.0,0.05904865073084276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05847401223559706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218246960520594,0.0,0.0,0.12374568690658562,0.0,0.03962660433897519,0.0,0.06107544063305085,0.0,0.0,0.052824775107281584,0.0,0.09838091374384836,0.0,0.0,0.1971652264025214,0.2815573710686991,0.0,0.13975958246717327,0.0,0.0,0.06952885291697655,0.0,0.0,0.052410476453750965,0.0,0.0,0.13848568908908584,0.17512827601742414,0.0,0.04939836480714117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04650809235620451,0.0,0.05406496158771339,0.05694879022169271,0.0,0.14363940933240976,0.041094447159036186,0.03963489400374122,0.0,0.0,0.2524815430096299,0.07109449250724664,0.0,0.11821231691235415,0.06872440787297418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051037764153517885,0.03648433296020233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966660629104634
mentalhealth,marlissa_lavellan,2020/03/24,"Been Blindsided by a New Diagnosis So as the title/header says, I pretty much got blindsided by a new diagnosis. 


I'm a twenty year old female and found out today that I have PTSD and a eating disorder. 


I'm honestly at a lost on how to deal with these issues and was wondering about any tips you may have on how to cope.",4.803636363636365,4.8563676969696985,6.935909090909089,74.72386363636366,69.0,10.842424242424245,27.10606060606061,10.686352973137794,2.7848606060606063,252,7,51,7,4,90,48,66,0.079,0.823,0.098,0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,1,4,2,0,0,6,0,5,1,0,2,0,10,11,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,1,3,1,11,5,1,9,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,2,5,34,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522212214255607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307727672690658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25654398575547593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290477311861183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454327883841405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902805487301152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297279577922469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336344046886102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24435156717363216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645506909740841,0.0,0.0,0.432378796332134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23488604549238956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277292610847348,0.0,0.0,0.26166101354137816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780092952812156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121774165846312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427486722158618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14414784233696915
mentalhealth,gloomykantele,2020/03/24,"Invisible Girl I'm sorry if this is too venty or whatever but.. I really need to talk about this.

I haven't felt completely real for 5 years now.. Though some days I've managed to feel 'normal' again, I still don't know who I am nor what I really like.. I used to be so sensitive and so emphathetic, I was always filled to the brim with whatever I was feeling, but when I was 16 I got caught in a very scarring and emotionally abusive friendship that left me with PTSD, and my mom was so tired and couldn't support me emotionally and I felt so abandoned that I learned to not trust anyone and just suck it up.

It's hard to make friends when I cannot feel anything because there's a barrier that comes up every time I even try and it feels like I turn completely invisible, even to myself. I feel so unlovable like this, I just want love. I just want attention. I want to be seen. I want my pain to be aknowledged. I feel like the vulnerable side of me wants attention so BAD, but it always gets pushed down even by mental health professionals.. I just need empathy.. to feel like someone SEES me.

 ..It would bring me so much peace.",3.2709636184857445,4.841750176991152,4.500471976401184,85.15925270403149,73.77876106194691,8.208062930186825,25.829891838741396,8.841846274778883,1.7958818092428708,884,30,186,18,18,291,128,226,0.20199999999999999,0.647,0.151,-0.9584,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,0,24,14,1,0,4,0,14,4,0,2,0,49,45,23,0,11,10,1,10,5,1,1,3,0,0,1,13,10,0,2,13,0,0,5,6,5,0,0,9,12,30,9,20,31,2,19,0,1,2,1,6,6,1,3,13,119,43,3,0.0,0.12729535307464868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17879248836836664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512249346431497,0.0,0.08841154976964744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897054611244197,0.06549263726316729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254751785236898,0.22529143589441136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928801849111099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417044736318561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128835033183856,0.0,0.09052036047918588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38026385518091055,0.2302591808218689,0.2063128604102167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830056094459065,0.0,0.0561314318474427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859272349629092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962425069119016,0.0,0.0,0.11420057547306114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904460087200705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673068482668432,0.0,0.0,0.26244161404931976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696614524361423,0.0,0.07171507474915582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827129144748564,0.0,0.0,0.12582899133606198,0.0,0.0,0.07897860420071345,0.1593264438442856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526551206286272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432061139734545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12558817894296634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228690025340168,0.1376538690751864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561343040279687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103107601925996,0.0,0.0,0.12026699759324495,0.0,0.0,0.08579937841156897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219183074937586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635384272066414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055563702847561,0.0,0.06264741623734428,0.12348310089660895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729427143731468,0.11686067473699988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927911285027722,0.0,0.08864682984921497,0.31684582090595315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632020802945033,0.0,0.0,0.06918594701076856
mentalhealth,internetfads,2020/03/24,"Is there a correlation between those who self harm and those who become abusive later in life? I was conversing with someone once about self harm and abuse, and he had mentioned those who self harm became abusive in the future.. Are there any studies or statistics to back this up?",7.941764705882353,8.514578078431374,6.7733333333333325,76.78000000000003,62.33333333333334,9.15294117647059,34.64705882352941,8.841846274778883,2.957988235294118,226,9,38,3,3,68,38,51,0.353,0.647,0.0,-0.9763,0,0,0,0,1,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,5,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,7,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,7,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,1,3,28,8,0,0.0,0.6833863904094262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074270531995244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14783529505469686,0.0,0.0,0.2123349482611501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579820966118086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20474954856508196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6017041667715166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16290041742374062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway12101b,2020/03/24,"I'm kinda worried about my mental health during recent major life changes I (F19) have had a really tough time dealing with all of this quarantine stuff. I'm trapped working at my college three hours away from my home and my boyfriend due to their area being under quarantine. This is for the foreseeable future, and not ideal. 

I know that everyone has been at least a little upset by all the changes recently, but every day for the past two weeks I've been getting sucker punched by a new major change. For example, today is when I found out that I can't go home until my home city reopens, so I won't see my boyfriend/family till mid-may most likely.

Every day I've been seesawing between two major emotional reactions. Either I feel nothing and completely numb (like I do right now), or I feel depressed and like my life isn't worth continuing. Let me make it clear that I would never ever try to hurt myself or end my life. It's more like I wish I could click a button and make myself disappear, that way I wouldn't have to deal with the new disappointment I face every day.

I don't know what to do. I haven't felt happy in at least a week. The stress of not knowing how my life will change tomorrow is keeping me up at night. That combined with a daily routine of get up, work, homework, go to bed, I just don't see the point in all of this.

What's wrong with me? Why can't I feel anything? And how I deal with all of this?

TL;DR: I feel some concerning emotions as a result of major life changes caused by recent life events.",4.397341399100359,5.292509605863195,5.14009306654258,84.24878393051033,70.20521172638436,8.062602760974098,26.996897781914072,8.269060116576782,1.6685555762370097,1207,38,242,17,21,391,166,307,0.141,0.7979999999999999,0.061,-0.9744,0,3,0,0,0,3,35.0,0,0,1,3,8,15,1,2,13,0,25,9,1,6,7,50,46,16,0,5,7,0,5,4,0,4,8,0,5,0,14,12,0,1,9,0,1,3,11,9,0,3,6,8,34,6,39,33,14,46,0,3,3,0,4,15,0,5,31,157,48,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672078984085497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617602550133236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08329006929260656,0.4288521075585974,0.0,0.08500938274704906,0.0,0.0,0.06473467475042036,0.0,0.0,0.15686699302114693,0.2507654683842649,0.06983289024406372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18240505262947,0.07181158537423367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334024695308221,0.2049366840730456,0.0774740889061462,0.0,0.0,0.0764337001665241,0.0,0.16398313072187146,0.0,0.07784818293967684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889851384160725,0.0,0.0,0.0847204573953807,0.0,0.09215768801876273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863096907848047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618277380834555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439853776119613,0.0,0.07984610138803595,0.0,0.0867963317176021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206639623399334,0.0,0.0,0.1336760553213653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290837464815395,0.3436093312382291,0.15844365874912786,0.08126206996116889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824120701936456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08170817162788499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253282439056483,0.15661245860267253,0.0,0.07608678552814586,0.0,0.07779711551129015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739870998216072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664549584961705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05194103538098573,0.0,0.2401660456970129,0.0,0.0,0.06924069217157873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292183139497624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287527682032247,0.0,0.09281561356193292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04727759103572923,0.0,0.07685304449054678,0.0,0.0,0.05504705582915885,0.0,0.15840404669335473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435642879908475,0.13007274491469376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731608369182001,0.0,0.09323640316160424,0.0,0.0,0.11805239125814188,0.08233926676525646,0.0,0.057595920146300515,0.08864673496627175,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mythrowawayplz123,2020/03/25,"Life is defeating I’ve been having some trying times and I don’t think I’ve fully explained everything at once to anyone but I really just need to let it out. 

For starters, me and my boyfriend of almost 3 years broke up because it didn’t seem like our lives would ever line up. He was my best friend before we dated so it really hurts. 

I also hate my job with everything in me. I don’t feel like it’s worth my time but it’s what I have to do right now. I also have personal issues at home. My mom is having trying times as well and I am supporting the household so she can fix herself after she had to spend years and years taking care of me instead of herself. 

It’s all a lot and it’s like I went from college to horrible adult life in 2 seconds. I know everybody will say it gets better but right now it’s just very hard.",0.6426345864661656,2.7927101657142903,2.6341052631578954,92.58231578947372,84.48571428571428,5.741353383458648,18.924812030075188,7.0608816371341465,0.2667142857142859,649,17,142,9,19,217,108,175,0.114,0.698,0.188,0.9387,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,0,3,11,13,1,0,2,0,18,2,0,0,2,25,30,13,0,2,5,1,2,3,1,2,2,1,1,2,10,8,0,0,5,0,2,1,3,4,1,1,5,3,23,9,20,22,4,22,0,3,0,0,13,9,0,4,15,97,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411312859752526,0.0,0.0,0.22541970905608624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854868891498968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591585872926387,0.0,0.1199297587342147,0.0,0.14790808067959066,0.12465018393866395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14369796214332592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748851099399094,0.0,0.0,0.2533359895968921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126361729201187,0.10068773161535986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088900754787847,0.0,0.07363545537947644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12625476653760356,0.13914930252150146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413745466658278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087943591867814,0.0,0.0,0.14710498728938648,0.13986143520541522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774570669197663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144120938665327,0.19910051130691767,0.20656883808240384,0.0,0.12445280911852274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982234721498565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16506749911802307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450539795913877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009674984257784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306357635835928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805798462730641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24072438018363876,0.0,0.11208133132034576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12830669605123338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993730777788728,0.0,0.0,0.10596951603895714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030881128521497,0.0,0.0,0.2465501522670289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19137833519301006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629045383404553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672219696579945,0.1306530093070409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011989874370156,0.0,0.0,0.2722826701362886
mentalhealth,AlexHowe24,2020/03/25,"How do you learn to accept validation? Basically what the title says. My self esteem took a big hit a couple of years ago due to a particularly messy situation with a girl. Compound that by the fact that she was a very large source of my validation and the outcome is that any validation I receive always feels sort of ""empty"" - like the person validating me is just going through the motions to be polite, not that they actually appreciate something about me.

With that, how do I begin to validate myself for my achievments when they feel worthless - and how do I begin to accept validation from others when it's given to me?",8.497787356321838,7.962316422413792,9.344827586206897,62.499597701149426,61.5,11.526436781609194,35.71264367816092,10.864195022040775,3.977102298850575,499,19,83,11,6,171,77,116,0.047,0.825,0.128,0.8259,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,2,1,7,4,0,0,10,0,7,0,0,3,1,16,15,7,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,8,4,0,0,5,0,0,4,1,1,0,0,3,3,14,3,16,10,0,12,0,1,0,0,9,1,0,1,8,64,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.2774530061659401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520304356937272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23657505511162735,0.0,0.0,0.19334574684539996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145920640706029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875190860880241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615842685677291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13890323888637646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24825519914525454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22610080131567425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966053089277631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195849430717661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188816120144645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3158873626744761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345918315521308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18309124031318755
mentalhealth,throughaway7777,2020/03/25,"I cannot bring myself to do schoolwork at home Its a problem ive had for a few years now that i mentally cannot bring myself to do school work at home. If i have something i would rather so i cannot put that off until after i have done the work but rather do it now and suffer the consequencs. Anf its becoming more important to do work at home as i need to complete it to go towards my final grades in highschool. I dont know what to do.

Im not sure whether this is mental health or not, maybe im just lazy but it has been an ongoing problem for a while and i think its linked to my depression yet i have no idea.",2.2119402985074608,3.1411018358208938,3.725552238805971,92.21907462686569,75.41791044776119,7.151044776119402,23.84776119402985,7.554174236665415,0.8050322388059694,482,14,114,6,10,160,79,134,0.179,0.8009999999999999,0.02,-0.9685,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,3,7,5,0,0,6,0,19,1,0,0,1,21,25,11,0,7,10,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,0,10,2,0,0,4,0,0,4,7,4,0,0,3,0,15,1,18,21,2,18,0,2,0,0,0,6,0,2,8,87,25,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16974411489400992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16114634275653228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237732710557565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572834047659705,0.1801294617660895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16836542203622185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873484426143338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337065814432633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4625060201322766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17350301116337272,0.33203407083373593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446678367749813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15440734245319712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30977693533750045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11396293706407833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941308245409574,0.0,0.1545059828213435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555476027460548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832196349216065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485577201315608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848158638516223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33567549528360435,0.0,0.0,0.1091805585377667,0.0,0.0,0.0989745774105491
mentalhealth,specialseacucumber,2020/03/25,"I'm having a really hard time and life seems to be playing with me So with this whole coronavirus pandemic going on my weekly therapy sessions have been cancelled until our state is under control. I am just now realizing, after 2 weeks, just how much I really need those meetings. You see, I don't have any people to talk to I only have one friend and one person who I love but we never made it official, although I am starting suspect that he ghosted me. We talked almost every day for a year and a half and now he hasn't answered me in a week. He said he was getting locked out of the app we use, better than using a number because of the bad data we have around here. 

I don't have to many people to come and support me. I was diagnosed with depression, anxiety and mild OCD 6 months ago and for me its been a journey I take by myself. My friends abandoned me 2 years ago because of a rumor, now its just me. I have one friend, but we arent close, I have my family and my job but that's it. Life seems to be throwing everything my way and while I have things to be happy about, life throws huge rocks at me. I dont know what to do anymore.",4.741500904159132,4.556686805907177,5.9488517179023495,82.5638924050633,69.12658227848101,8.796745027124775,28.74291742013261,8.418075326091056,1.8873980711271856,891,28,187,12,14,300,141,237,0.08900000000000001,0.782,0.129,0.8721,2,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,6,1,0,2,11,11,0,0,9,0,25,5,0,5,1,42,42,17,1,1,6,0,1,0,3,0,4,1,0,1,11,21,0,2,6,2,0,5,6,3,0,4,6,3,34,8,27,33,2,33,0,2,1,1,22,8,0,3,18,136,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21209152317971694,0.0,0.1197932767810938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135325766486674,0.0,0.09151747231193763,0.0,0.11864191606830687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649705187417248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099886980517365,0.1458520295272416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580399577735726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030516090857436,0.0,0.0,0.1341764631942356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715216962665382,0.0,0.10303810042887462,0.12142305923985194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020677088343864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079437049064928,0.0,0.10751672852224388,0.0,0.11277756435948573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772800983227398,0.0,0.06250231779736119,0.0,0.06798911716372337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273495419706734,0.10716597732570507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871541807888875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574612986803162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25349697439619256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797174820113864,0.11319784959163677,0.0,0.12128716949884598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954884112876448,0.0,0.0879426313649238,0.08870495281274969,0.09226688766764768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431954102525691,0.09098485054243176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587429852459384,0.10445727155744368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532775058073924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379658161291352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533050660993718,0.2178153404713999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08467551595727256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357559668351569,0.0,0.0,0.08994770704094146,0.19230991061904265,0.0,0.0,0.13680860114654575,0.0,0.07947759425951421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975786275133919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20664573881595275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495760737767127,0.28788258312247583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335638629271815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407702618138214
mentalhealth,gaiantit,2020/03/25,Anxiety I want to pay my phone bill but I can't because website is telling me there is no bill and I feel anxious and I don't want my anxiety back but you know that feeling I wasn't feeling that for a long time and now it came back for this stupid thing,0.14220238095238358,2.1335954821428587,1.74642857142857,99.16523809523814,85.25,5.161904761904762,23.619047619047624,6.42735559955562,0.368211904761905,201,8,49,2,6,65,38,56,0.22899999999999998,0.635,0.135,-0.8163,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,0,0,4,1,1,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,12,12,5,0,2,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,4,0,3,1,4,1,0,0,2,3,9,0,3,10,0,6,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,33,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4091274290399709,0.3020909771510796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4112351171277056,0.0,0.16300730437940258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30583951651643504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4056232572278137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695852279743932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23664457232702885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337233238301081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776516712286617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592571736192815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154442106963682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sgriz13,2020/03/25,"I ruin lives My boyfriend said I ruined his life and happiness because for the past year that we’ve dated, he’s felt like he’s been teaching me how to be an adult. I get why he would be upset, but isnt part of a relationship to be patient with your SO? 

I asked him bluntly “so did essentially ruin your life?” And he bluntly responded “yes”

This isn’t my first relationship and this one is my longest yet. I can’t help feeling like a burden to him now. I’m the reason he’s miserable now. I emotionally drained him bc I wasn’t good enough. I’m never going to be good enough for anyone... I can feel myself spiraling out of control 

It’s going to be a long night...",0.5279347826086962,2.796924166666667,2.9940398550724647,88.95888586956522,86.31884057971014,5.7688405797101465,21.668478260869566,7.1686216300943375,0.7740565217391309,517,18,110,8,16,178,86,138,0.154,0.682,0.16399999999999998,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,2,6,11,0,2,6,1,14,2,0,3,1,14,24,7,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,1,2,1,0,1,4,5,0,1,4,0,0,2,5,6,0,2,5,4,19,5,11,13,3,13,0,4,0,0,18,1,0,0,12,70,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903289835665253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914758486508515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377422360399803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909340355296399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149247259634528,0.0,0.3517983799827075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17215277051457914,0.12161655984557747,0.16345315903648233,0.0,0.0,0.14480256823051316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894123069655409,0.0,0.19349796831915464,0.2855715896134368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812192793911454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410553429181035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24048529905453755,0.16633732204071686,0.0,0.1503214171705914,0.1506534130898778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13129641957130367,0.0,0.0,0.15975485857060615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535625050868152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18434888862103965,0.1625094276347564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750308563240122,0.0,0.3655392917919448,0.0,0.0,0.16193332302535346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536114198233636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12093069793062115,0.0,0.0,0.109626337178938
mentalhealth,Goodfellow97,2020/03/25,"Hey Reddit, it's me Goodfellow97 So, I've got a serious question. I know the mechanics of ""putting yourself out there"" but how do you overcome the social anxiety? I'm a hopeful artist but only really perform at open mics. I went to school for music and business, so I understand the steps which need to be taken. Yet because of my schizotypal personality disorder, I constantly keep coming up to a line I can't seem to cross. Right now is the perfect time for personal growth and refinement.

So please Reddit, how do I stop being such a bitch?",4.001057173678531,6.2179363980582565,5.484983818770228,76.12180151024813,73.36893203883496,9.23797195253506,30.861920172599785,9.725611199111238,3.4302586839266445,431,20,75,12,9,145,78,103,0.133,0.7170000000000001,0.149,0.5814,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,2,9,4,1,0,8,0,6,0,0,2,1,18,17,9,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,5,0,2,4,1,0,6,1,2,0,0,3,0,9,2,11,12,0,16,0,0,0,0,6,5,1,3,5,49,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647513584198156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128269053911412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18551531369173813,0.0,0.23272983852163245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468235368930089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722446837983969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139030827337096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19142366167424416,0.0,0.0,0.1183573358504015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15968821149969473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16379252337079936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760916238433213,0.0,0.23640282967785295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164983168946414,0.2412547541086961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796642684194355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18391799125499747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179578652980497,0.0,0.19605749766024105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195344616646444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800522948251777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557932773288655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22419946149628656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996427533001882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,burrit02,2020/03/25,"Is there something wrong with me?? So for the past few weeks I've been feeling sick and not being able to eat. I'd eat a little bit and feel like I'm going to throw up. Everything else about me is healthy. I'm otherwise eating well, getting enough sleep and exercise. But I can't fucking eat anything. I haven't eaten in almost 3 days and I don't know what to think of it. I can drink tea and water but that's about it. Anyone know what could be going on?",0.7061855670103085,2.7286202886597937,2.4259896907216496,94.94620103092787,83.22680412371135,5.1171134020618565,18.978350515463926,6.2581,-0.14821154639175305,356,9,80,3,10,117,71,97,0.048,0.8740000000000001,0.079,0.1877,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,2,0,10,12,1,0,0,16,22,8,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,6,8,0,5,2,0,3,4,2,1,0,2,2,6,2,11,17,3,10,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,1,4,47,11,0,0.1629374045832448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16315827443079134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392962176796173,0.0,0.13408360080539702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778854453871018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009225922244194,0.0,0.0,0.10508114648102884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15961662557379971,0.0,0.666902569025228,0.13611329385820312,0.0,0.0,0.1683578948481999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643763297492282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16477209495702888,0.11640251439070293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063300499885127,0.0851280689013746,0.0,0.18520216383724028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17909227275538936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960298559316477,0.16330608458447454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554218942633175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16305507602819772,0.0,0.0,0.1254371744495369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440370973290336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069855772394245,0.0,0.14650029471597248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17814647356949065,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dizzydumbass,2020/03/25,"I thought I was too fat to get an eating disorder, and now I'm screwed I'm an idiot. I thought that even if I adopted all the behaviors, intentionally made every choice, that it wouldn't *really* be disordered eating, since I was self-aware. I'm too old for it, I thought, and too fat. I didn't notice the habits had taken hold for months, it still felt new every time I finished logging calories under 500. I celebrated the realization I need to take hot showers to warm my body up, I welcomed the dizzy spells, because that meant it was working. I would sit there and cry if I accidentally ate as much as 1000 calories. It's become a fun secret: everyone just sees success. People ask me how I've lost so much, and I can finally fit in with someone besides the fat crowd. It's okay that I'm losing weight like this because I'm not *really* doing anything dangerous, just playing at it. People starve themselves to cope and control their lives, but if I'm genuinely just being vain, I guess it can't happen. Instead, it's given my entire life a new structure I didn't even know I was missing, and now I'm realizing I can't turn it off.

I got scared today. I was reorganizing my bookshelf, stood up, and felt the dizziness coming. It's nothing new, but it's been getting notably worse and more frequent. I literally stopped processing anything but the sound of my heartbeat. I started falling, so I staggered to my bed and laid there for at least a couple minutes. When I started thinking again, I started wondering if it was the fat that had caught up to me, that maybe I was having a heart attack, or if maybe I'd accidentally doubled my adderall.

I probably would've told my therapist at least partially last week, but my college shut down, and that's gone now. Weirdly enough, for the first time ever, I was feeling much better about my body because of her. That should've told me this had already grown into something else. My roommates were starting to ask things, too, about how long I was going between shopping trips or if it was okay to lose weight so fast. I won't see them for months either.

Even when I was at a 39 BMI, I had very severe vitamin deficiencies. I'm allergic to fucking everything and picky on top of that. The only difference between then and now is that I don't eat 3000 calories of cheez-its for dinner. I really feel like dogshit, but I felt awful when I was fatter too.

I would say I'm asking for advice, but I already know what I'm going to do. Any dialogue someone could start with me is something I've had a million times in my head. I've already decided this is the solution for it all-- my loneliness (nobody wants a fat girl), my insecurity, everything. Maybe I'll finally convince myself it's okay to exist, I'll stop feeling guilty for every move my body makes. I want my footsteps and the creak of my mattress to be quieter, I want to look like I can be snapped. This laces every action I do with the promise of progress. I don't feel sick when I look at myself in the mirror anymore.

I know that I'm still well before the point of no return, too. If I turned back, I could forget about this. I know I won't, though, because my before picture has become my definition of failure.",4.811809111583892,5.748988586750791,5.73846599662534,80.18163854449419,69.28391167192429,8.168967793998974,31.463428948719827,8.356213837460157,2.3662689164404656,2540,106,483,36,43,837,296,634,0.135,0.767,0.09699999999999999,-0.982,1,0,2,0,0,0,86.0,0,0,2,10,38,28,5,2,24,4,46,23,10,6,3,81,114,41,0,16,20,0,11,3,0,5,9,2,3,1,34,18,12,4,20,2,1,10,11,13,1,2,39,17,76,15,56,64,11,72,0,4,4,2,13,20,2,11,44,315,110,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06159213516554984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086653430453046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04286252565402622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625087712168749,0.0,0.0,0.10373655250120546,0.0,0.17677347734083132,0.07170566452140809,0.0,0.048466138981487515,0.0,0.15368988376732198,0.13922324989095902,0.10726768580749976,0.0,0.0,0.055744866443915686,0.0,0.21003618759253048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05429471867398762,0.0,0.0,0.07069344560879359,0.10064856848837013,0.06974143800308835,0.0692354376139395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585287984329304,0.14447556086925178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19348611505057106,0.052653433267079865,0.0,0.0,0.06512678468137373,0.0,0.1248920575205766,0.057014195999828834,0.21242179673907,0.060227815876171514,0.11329450514461338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747934107207712,0.04502860705124141,0.1815559018989669,0.13809245310084606,0.0,0.05361324110089484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05827017076516605,0.06586109215347258,0.0,0.07164274332146896,0.0,0.050410806869904234,0.0,0.0694345931737142,0.0,0.055737174369177335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468691022251774,0.0,0.0,0.07469079120392685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855844296882766,0.051377819665611536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04451991589992682,0.09237974567325673,0.0,0.05565659835926066,0.055779520055213465,0.10585856271779384,0.14102877751759235,0.06880463327318058,0.0,0.0,0.05964046027621458,0.042072979357487314,0.0,0.18996616203851927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061980542535627,0.0669908591826067,0.1390027910802209,0.04673590738355464,0.0,0.1826241480308909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060478934503991486,0.0717600129298822,0.06613932706888495,0.0,0.0,0.047937115272851695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739405870066891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05958367341835742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795694388041731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113579492880787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050123944047955386,0.06310397305925916,0.0,0.10045341520341787,0.0,0.0657539815096227,0.07120589985563366,0.0,0.05213902386296673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10681013986653527,0.0970470658210686,0.0,0.0,0.22306460608730475,0.0,0.10067159490306957,0.10539171672245908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04739067630758415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318262702057148,0.04187429637915896,0.04038704528731602,0.061926603347702815,0.15011621328215524,0.1102598076920248,0.0,0.05974502028293827,0.120455631752343,0.0,0.0,0.13711696663802786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05200630767517417,0.11153008816439287,0.0,0.050558821935425886,0.15350699125131798,0.056671492348652076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835328933043247,0.04588655242561409,0.0,0.06423290124915601,0.1343239987497886,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,izurice,2020/03/25,"OCD or just anxiety? I’ve had a mild anxiety disorder for about two years now, but recently it’s taken a different turn. I’ve had an eating disorder for almost 2 years as well, and have been in recovery for about 4 months. Recently every time I eat or even think about food I get physically nauseous, but I can usually ward it off and get through it. Within the past week, every time I see anything dirty such as dishes, old laundry, or anything of the sort, I’ll get physically sick and start panicking. It feels like my veins start to heat up in my arms and I start sweating and hyperventilating. The initial panic will wear off within a minute or so, but I’ll have an underlying anxiety for about 20-45min afterwards. If an entire room is dirty or if I eat a lot of food, it’s this same thing but 10x the power. I don’t know if this is just a symptom of my anxiety, or if I have a mild case of OCD. My therapists in the past have said that I have symptoms of OCD, but I was never diagnosed. Any suggestions or tips will be greatly appreciated",4.5062857142857125,5.242127438095238,6.049523809523812,78.40714285714287,69.85714285714286,10.0,29.761904761904763,10.125756701596842,2.8666190476190483,822,31,168,21,14,281,114,210,0.153,0.7979999999999999,0.049,-0.965,2,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,11,4,0,1,14,0,16,14,4,0,1,31,29,24,0,4,18,0,1,1,0,2,4,1,1,0,9,5,6,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,6,3,14,3,26,20,2,28,0,0,1,0,2,10,0,14,19,111,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114257350381867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759373410167865,0.0,0.3491529468424445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18779356439177225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581181679634565,0.0,0.11921301347556723,0.2615431098196749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502665774943797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536374299611437,0.0,0.19227285562468902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05769374263223569,0.08151497629199556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759468234281345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17884182024593318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257986058221182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06270784803984082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05574480514758668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700601687793724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107566934526122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800301983684103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973156690930906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387490837960386,0.0,0.0,0.21784783515819292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22532525906291725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853777646774763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092506181057672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24228738929585003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371927441144573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324820041574742,0.07580474947197001,0.07311238909418037,0.0,0.0,0.13306837880116926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411094875764135,0.11146173708966926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566798002082438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152628609469374,0.0,0.10259201111807482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695676785243986
mentalhealth,broadwaybisexual,2020/03/25,"I think it’s getting bad again I cannot believe I’m writing this, because I seriously though I was better. Apparently not.

In the past I’ve struggled with various eating disorders, but predominantly anorexia and binge eating for different reasons. I’ve been getting so much better and honestly I’d almost forgotten that it ever used to be an issue.

Obviously with the whole coronavirus lockdown people’s daily routines are going to be dramatically changed, and that’s something I thought I could cope with as I’m relatively introverted anyway. Clearly, I’d forgotten that one short walk per day is not the same thing as three hours of dance every week, and my brain spiralled right back down into that darkness.

Being home almost 24/7 for the foreseeable future, with a ton of food and no one to help me regulate my intake (I live with my mother but she seriously doesn’t care), how am I going to stop myself drastically over- or more likely under-eating?? I’m a completely healthy weight now, and in good shape, but I know even the slightest gain will make me panic and shut down.

If anyone has any advice I would love to hear it, because right now I have no way out of this. I’m really scared, and I don’t know what to do.",5.701979613733907,6.948626051502148,6.599246244635192,73.6866805257511,67.45493562231759,9.258476394849783,30.87151287553648,9.516144504307137,2.9362019313304732,982,38,171,20,16,326,150,233,0.12300000000000001,0.735,0.142,0.8931,2,1,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,3,10,13,0,3,8,0,17,6,1,4,3,40,34,18,0,3,7,1,1,1,0,2,0,1,1,0,11,15,4,1,5,1,0,4,7,6,0,3,3,2,19,7,25,25,6,28,0,0,0,1,6,12,0,4,12,116,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254823824400437,0.0,0.0,0.25717144559219113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732432837420191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978841443394449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874063580879004,0.10721836761520147,0.1565571052231016,0.0,0.0,0.14467596102221314,0.0,0.2271393460019903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14334987452688072,0.0,0.0,0.1309242397873819,0.0,0.13584250351358645,0.0,0.13463717644113415,0.0,0.0,0.1025262570387776,0.0,0.0,0.0828148938179473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13416284775748893,0.14717088093720926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627943607881722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481468661216651,0.11615569305614387,0.10819235713037184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15527588214326588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13417957879374695,0.0,0.1459586048178884,0.10770560321040254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14472926711552364,0.0,0.08607162510234836,0.0,0.1288073593489643,0.0,0.12645961296655645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340284047353828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114337394034884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273544798713908,0.0,0.11338984339245566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589653156722572,0.0,0.08571577640453695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09439734117394147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17403012060052972,0.0,0.0,0.15066340853099647,0.0,0.0,0.12258345414872553,0.08902447258395077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226379393829589,0.13202856759196338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193257023533608,0.0,0.0,0.12856246758818599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09885756513645548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735789292118382,0.0,0.13424374227508354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531099723258724,0.0822810030654847,0.12616379840710085,0.1019445098246818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090643983693124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192719414427748,0.10300408343966112,0.156370800684568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14336702622563866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912199549325174,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lone_ichabod,2020/03/25,"Will me constantly consuming horrifyingly dark media and art affect my mental health negatively? I don’t really consider myself some gothic edge-lord who loves wallowing in his own misery, but I do think that I am pretty morbid at times with my interests. Often, I find myself attracted to dark and disturbing pieces of media and art, not for any sort of coping mechanism, but just because I find it intriguing. For context, I am a 16 year old male. I feel like my interest in the morbid started with my love of horror. 

When I was 6-10 years old I was a fan of the *Goosebumps* books, as many kids that age were. My favorite film was *The Monster Squad*, a fun 80s adventure romp. So far nothing peculiar. Though I did watch *A Nightmare On Elm Street* when I was about 7, that was a bit much for that age.

Ages 11-13 I got into more adult things. I enjoyed zombie films, read Max Brooks’ *World War Z*, enjoyed it. In middle school I began to read Lovecraft and King, and also got into existential philosophy in the 6th grade, though I didn’t know at the time that that was what it was called, it was just when I thought too much sometimes and cried.

14-16, now I find myself attracted to morbid things. I believe life has no meaning, yet that doesn’t mean that we should die (Absurdism). I have purchased *The Conspiracy Against The Human Race* by Thomas Ligotti, a collection of essays which form an argument against life and human existence. I have 7 novels by Cormac McCarthy, an author who is famous for being disturbed and depraved in his storytelling. I find myself staring at paintings by artists with dementia and depression because I find the visualization of their pain interesting to look at. I’m subscribed to r/morbidreality, yeah.

Most recently, I have started listening to the album *Everywhere at the End of Time* by The Caretaker. It is supposed to make you feel how it feels to have dementia and have your mind slowly wither away. It is strangely beautiful.

My question is if all of my hobbies are going to harm me in the long run. I feel depressed, but it just seems that I’m bored with life. I’m just sad constantly. I finish one of these hobbies and I don’t feel sad. Just curious.",3.3335298266235687,5.872311315662652,4.451054951513374,81.17905083749633,76.80722891566266,7.711431090214517,26.98942109903027,8.628873520835908,2.3184986776373795,1736,70,312,38,41,566,233,415,0.161,0.696,0.14300000000000002,-0.8711,0,0,0,0,0,0,65.0,1,2,1,1,18,23,1,2,20,1,31,8,1,3,1,55,56,24,2,2,10,0,5,1,0,2,5,1,0,5,24,18,0,0,17,9,1,2,7,11,0,1,15,9,45,12,49,38,10,45,0,4,3,2,18,19,0,7,25,214,69,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977533706326452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783792587852921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372463308268844,0.0,0.0,0.12162142552497965,0.0,0.0,0.11239155574346638,0.0,0.0,0.10890839788602412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018626677015806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21560294511762876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10957796847841084,0.0,0.0,0.17184047007320036,0.0,0.10353162732925074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835476051672561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25219973504638143,0.07126615291436053,0.0,0.0,0.4558787405566255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669398894509356,0.0,0.15956897209094748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603662766698478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05482363230198977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21138316341752236,0.04873604812934538,0.0,0.0,0.088281474068714,0.08377044074843006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800684978496506,0.0,0.06658832188704715,0.10113756044501478,0.0,0.21732841881364756,0.0,0.0,0.10053121510713248,0.0,0.10072575394880014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666519520761445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571917224874993,0.0,0.2093555943749368,0.0,0.06759767089956811,0.0,0.106148082487219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148835089589127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175025050479154,0.0,0.1995672413486714,0.0,0.06390664846294296,0.0,0.09849763257198296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095903036825883,0.0,0.0908146849077358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866185300887977,0.0,0.14121650540163608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254773817641874,0.06392001737761319,0.1960207553665672,0.07919561741803048,0.17450667097798192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847999184906306
mentalhealth,loverman15,2020/03/25,Need someone to talk to please My mental state isn’t good right now I’ll go farther into it on a personal chat if anyone cares,3.1133333333333333,4.2203160740740735,4.534259259259262,86.5991666666667,73.44444444444444,6.881481481481483,24.61111111111111,7.1686216300943375,0.9966444444444448,102,3,21,1,2,34,26,27,0.0,0.7190000000000001,0.281,0.802,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,10,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444638233931785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3564629182400255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19869823303966025,0.2932463361523567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35233673232029544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592402743414966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052764347068536,0.0,0.3837799537313364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985752677765676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962335761902589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28101291081631496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Buissneshostes,2020/03/25,"Do I have Depression So Hey i am Dominik i am A Male 16 Year Old Human 
And Was Wondering. if I Have Infact Depression.
My Symptoms Are.

I Dont Get Things Done Wich I Know i Must And Shut 
Also i am Feeling. Empty Inside And Have A Lack of Purpose.
I am Passivly Sad At Moast Times If That Makes Sense An Certaint. Trigger Words Can. Throw Me in A Fit of Crying For Aproximatly 15 Minutes. I Get Rly Sad Just. Writing This 
Also AS A Side. not Sorry For my Grammar. I am Not a Native English Speaker. So Sry Anyways i Sleep Way. To Much And infact dont Suffer. From Narcolepsie Also I Collapas. Some Times Due to Unknown Reasons I have A Near Permamnet Migrane. I Also Have ASD/Aspergers. Anyways i am Suverly Sad About my Inner Workings. And The Lack of My Understanding Of Them. Like i am Not Gonna into That. Cause. well So Far. i Have Discovered That My Mind Works on 6 Levels of Well Mind. So 


If I Dont Have Depression I Dont Want. Pull The Sickness Through The Dirt AS We. Say in My Native Language 
Cause I Have Rly Respect. For Pepole How Have Such Conditions i am Sadlym Not Able To Get This Evaluated Bye A Professional. Cause of The Whole Coronavirus. Thing 


So Do i Have Depression Pls Awnser 
It has Ben Buging Me For Weeks


To All That Have Mental Conditions i hope You Get Better <3",-0.5054175183586942,1.3249800965251026,2.017615262321147,89.64255431902491,109.03861003861005,4.9657354833825424,20.52244681656446,6.615977163443126,0.8968550382315077,1011,40,198,19,51,343,144,259,0.14400000000000002,0.76,0.096,-0.9354,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,1,1,1,3,17,14,0,0,12,0,31,3,1,7,2,37,43,20,0,8,8,0,1,1,0,2,2,2,0,2,9,7,0,0,5,0,0,2,8,8,2,0,2,3,35,6,25,39,6,21,0,8,0,0,9,12,0,6,8,146,44,3,0.10541545854198683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372028164418828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093231406584014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248721418412877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11579393127978073,0.0,0.0,0.3631767199017149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787661355392518,0.49418452927136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05330122321895983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22030090490234924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470133589581457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05793357916226845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05150066830313032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703656371412269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623398822986628,0.0,0.21287912511627569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749249128647669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106157909510126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838464830099012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383060369928197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549158832543798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800397534704793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956702428330914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006669313927392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229372032089882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974121001802707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062176768668416975,0.08367388430492001,0.08455792227994355,0.0,0.1895623142337512,0.0,0.0,0.11769259485907295,0.0,0.0,0.11431856806638464,0.1534874186212364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788409911946998
mentalhealth,DRAGONBLOOD830,2020/03/25,"What would you do if you own head was begging you to end it? Asking for a friend. My friend says that he feels like his head is constantly sreaming at him to kill himself, I just need to know what she should do. Please.",1.9883333333333333,3.781986,2.1708333333333343,99.53625000000004,77.8888888888889,5.388888888888888,20.13888888888889,5.985473137389443,-0.3177777777777777,170,4,40,1,4,51,37,45,0.087,0.705,0.20800000000000002,0.6705,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,3,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,0,6,2,2,0,0,7,10,1,1,4,2,0,1,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,9,3,5,7,1,3,0,0,0,0,12,1,0,1,3,28,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24260143769176865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28043189724981377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298437352907233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121314302338682,0.1853898838029868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4009846704547432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5326524427495556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871029972923628,0.0,0.14261674590934045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678066557870107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924191087990912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848577323084539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20636819060876704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18434436943487686,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LordMindfuck,2020/03/25,"Spiraling due to coronavirus I want to kill myself. The way the United States is responding to this epidemic is unacceptable, and if we don't contain it now, we won't be able to be close with anyone ever again. I cannot live with that, as a single man in my 20s I had hopes of eventually dating someone and getting married, but it's never gonna happen now due to social distancing. I won't be able to kiss, hug, or be less than 6 feet apart from any potential partner. I wouldn't even want a partner at that point. Virtual dating simply doesn't work for me, and never will. Is there any hope of this epidemic ending soon? Or is it going to be decades? If it's the latter, I am 100% going to take this potassium cyanide.",4.097054794520549,4.926887883561643,5.621808219178085,80.7612054794521,70.84931506849315,8.853698630136988,27.61369863013699,9.120678840339163,2.1809830136986306,565,19,113,11,10,192,95,146,0.034,0.836,0.13,0.912,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,2,0,0,1,7,5,1,0,5,0,18,3,1,0,3,23,28,9,1,7,5,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,3,9,8,0,1,1,0,0,2,8,1,0,0,1,0,11,4,18,17,2,21,0,0,0,2,7,5,0,6,12,80,20,1,0.4014375971106237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729913319169933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403472508943961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177777279024254,0.0,0.0,0.13257287342170945,0.18156164466136368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486728788224964,0.0,0.22814623757102326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17749497067845038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39871811286147535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220656116373343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723837646319976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096134227345696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897441426839559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046075380128041,0.17006838665879506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509155567509034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367782956653445,0.15932123960216246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14612567589762016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayacc124728,2020/03/25,"My friend needs my help coming up with a story because he’s going to be hospitalized in April I’m not sure that this goes here, but I need help and don’t know where to go.
I’m using a throwaway account for the utmost confidentiality.
Recently my friend has started opening up to me about his mental health, and today he told me that his parents have found out a little more than he wanted and he thinks they’re going to send him to a mental facility before April. He wants to come up with a story to explain his disappearance because he doesn’t want it to get around at his school. I need help coming up with ideas.
(I know it’s not a good idea to be hiding your mental health state from people, but I understand why he wouldn’t want everyone knowing. I know he’s thought a lot about this decision and it’s what he wants so I’m going to help him)
Any ideas for where he went?",3.678910256410255,4.765094916666668,4.822222222222227,85.15115384615386,72.05555555555556,7.316239316239318,23.84615384615385,7.61054688173877,0.962910256410256,695,18,145,8,13,229,98,180,0.042,0.8340000000000001,0.124,0.9247,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,7,4,0,0,8,0,7,2,0,1,1,42,39,7,0,9,4,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,8,13,0,0,13,0,1,10,5,0,0,0,4,0,17,4,27,32,2,28,0,0,0,0,27,12,0,1,5,81,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738594517827753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09668714067125914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241695847835064,0.0,0.09242027093432267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806772182532866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378281248739492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908675432902932,0.16782574040044448,0.0,0.05674495478328623,0.0,0.24690536384389355,0.09109805887042598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308976015098521,0.0,0.0,0.2911996307315481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3678270283116117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387598603068144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885711969242018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233749746914284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283641269412311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416018500017387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060006614039966,0.0,0.0,0.07529744416842082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072406187166526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099204985847045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687568227189365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023649249583967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959377634731331,0.0,0.08622529079924987,0.0,0.0,0.10295087322821138,0.10378281248739492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130682600345444,0.0,0.09380534609362184,0.0,0.0,0.3203089817741865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068382231387277,0.09800486235469734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tryingtogetbetter101,2020/03/25,"Tips for not overeating? I was nice and slim before uni, and then during first year a couple of traumatising things happened & I developed and unhealthy relationship with overeating. Essentially if food is put in front of me, I’ll eat it regardless if I’m hungry or not. I’ll seek out food pretty much constantly.

I just want a normal relationship with food where I’m not constantly thinking about eating/eating :(",7.233599999999999,8.646841160000001,7.251999999999999,69.78600000000003,64.06666666666666,10.266666666666666,32.33333333333333,10.355215969177356,3.5907333333333336,337,13,54,8,5,108,53,75,0.152,0.789,0.059000000000000004,-0.7925,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,17,7,7,0,5,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,4,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,0,4,1,10,6,1,12,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,3,5,34,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18782690729226909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475098529111995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746640301211944,0.0,0.0,0.19181078037076169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773824562144988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14745319150593145,0.6288540731887394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329467268712887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743372565021502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984823320702686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17636138753236136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17426672152883868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37223051948730745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151674197714042,0.111077013827652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022475487465798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163305656572936
mentalhealth,Whyusertakenlied,2020/03/25,How do i calm down my Harpaxophobia Every time I think about getting robbed in my house i start to panic anyway I can calm it?,1.0187179487179492,3.4000906153846167,2.7669230769230784,90.66141025641028,85.15384615384616,5.005128205128205,16.358974358974358,6.42735559955562,-0.3251641025641025,100,2,21,1,3,33,21,26,0.12300000000000001,0.706,0.171,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,2,4,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,15,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789852277775671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23500771949616284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5190215835101203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5277563749818276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31837859144352737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28822077192535456,0.0,0.0,0.2622884529701501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,strugglingbitch,2020/03/25,Traumatic Experience but no PTSD. Anyone relate? Stories? I've had a lot of traumatic instances at the psych ward but I don't think I have PTSD from them. It makes my trauma feel fake.,0.6716666666666669,3.114045055555557,2.483333333333338,87.94500000000002,98.44444444444444,5.7333333333333325,19.88888888888889,7.1686216300943375,0.9987555555555564,146,5,28,3,6,48,31,36,0.415,0.585,0.0,-0.9607,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,6,6,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,3,5,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,17,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364333455178147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.330762999564707,0.0,0.0,0.17097229436087136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874720986321224,0.0,0.0,0.22570916199763125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7905284272567579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21666462148795385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,actualweiner,2020/03/25,"Please dm me if you’re free to talk You don’t need to be able to console me, I just want to talk to someone about anything",-0.6147619047619061,1.1886194285714282,1.114285714285714,103.69738095238097,86.85714285714286,3.733333333333334,20.047619047619047,3.1291,-0.8444666666666669,96,3,25,0,3,31,21,28,0.0,0.7609999999999999,0.239,0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,14,4,0,0.3757731943891255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092293210310627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27863106223467937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41248612486683206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31839140817579936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6040645192287221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216407659984588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamstucknoplacetogo,2020/03/25,How has CBT helped your mental health? I like the idea of CBT but I can't seem to find it practical and I hate that I can't so. So I wanna ask how has CBT helped your mental health?,-1.24707317073171,0.6685311219512222,0.8470243902439023,103.59492682926829,91.43902439024393,4.255609756097561,10.639024390243902,5.6839178017228535,-1.6666429268292688,140,1,37,1,5,46,26,41,0.138,0.8170000000000001,0.045,-0.6868,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,0,4,2,1,0,1,0,4,2,0,2,0,8,7,6,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,7,1,3,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23818837086349734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23286769053539874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25154616061243035,0.0,0.5416463282938637,0.0,0.0,0.3415522936463721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28761979051815983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447444862032354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5135240976609541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319455159868061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gremlinbando,2020/03/25,Hoarding Does anyone feel an emotional connection/helper/organizer when watching hoarders? Thoughts? Concerns? Do you need assistance?,10.388333333333335,14.536642833333339,7.142777777777778,51.867500000000035,92.88888888888887,10.68888888888889,54.5,8.841846274778883,9.0274,113,9,9,4,4,32,18,18,0.0,0.8540000000000001,0.146,0.3736,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.351560676804574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4399926874395466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5655682101198709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542244427861799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37281052483548416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39915707495695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cizzzus,2020/03/25,"[Academic] Your opinion and thoughts about depression  Hello, I'm the first-year neurobiophysics student. I'm working on my presentation ""Is the World More Depressed?"" and one of the main aspects of presentation is survey.  So I need your opinion, please answer a couple of questions. Link below:

 [https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSevF56hsTaRSqZR08NXMy9-e6w804UKeKE3JwYFzmccUKC1yg/viewform](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSevF56hsTaRSqZR08NXMy9-e6w804UKeKE3JwYFzmccUKC1yg/viewform)",23.902066666666666,32.038620140000006,11.732000000000005,25.792666666666694,37.6,8.133333333333335,36.333333333333336,8.841846274778883,4.379133333333334,437,14,32,6,6,102,38,50,0.076,0.878,0.047,-0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,9,6,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,4,0,6,5,2,5,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,3,2,22,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506203669499153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5458544951543063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695369468484089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349616163038327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147252769197659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3478377673483693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35497677902461405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515663728441726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306915416459133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20405955901518785
mentalhealth,ocmuji,2020/03/25,How can science explain toxic people? Is there a scientific explanation as to why these people drive us crazy?,5.630526315789473,8.936671263157898,6.746578947368422,63.61355263157896,73.21052631578947,8.010526315789475,30.552631578947373,8.841846274778883,3.415505263157895,90,4,12,2,2,30,18,19,0.14,0.86,0.0,-0.4137,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6778866429077475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5880893136266909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4411583146279253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ahk689,2020/03/25,"Seeking Advice Hello Everyone,

​

I'm new to reddit and also new to the situation I'm facing in my life. I'm 28 years old, and got married in March of 2019. It's only been a little over a year since I've been married and I'm already considering divorce. My husband has been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder. He's often very very mean, dismissive and verbally abusive. He screams very loudly in our condo community to the point where I am embarrassed to face my neighbors. We share a dog, and I think that is one of the big reasons why I have not left him yet. I still love my husband a lot, and I'm one of those people that will hold on to 2 good memories, and discard the 100 bad ones. Lately life has been only full of bad memories. He's seeking counseling for his BPD and I am as well to figure out how to cope, but he's so rude to me every single day. Are there people out there who have BPD and having successful relationships/marriages? Is there anything I can do to help him succeed in this? Advice on how to proceed would be greatly appreciated. Thanks for reading.",4.347819767441859,5.790237348837213,5.841322674418608,77.11686773255815,70.86046511627906,8.537790697674419,30.646802325581394,9.017664075816787,2.7003081395348842,870,37,160,17,16,295,133,215,0.085,0.7809999999999999,0.134,0.9345,0,0,0,0,1,0,26.0,2,0,0,2,12,13,1,1,8,0,19,6,2,3,0,25,29,15,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,2,3,2,2,1,6,13,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,5,1,3,5,2,16,8,27,21,3,26,0,0,0,1,19,15,0,2,11,105,22,3,0.0,0.14447321917777078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383072436366955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455847517429306,0.09751149905320748,0.0,0.1321166890292877,0.1481645592665612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034224266007767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036215216571377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071461172691852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863808725201056,0.0,0.0,0.12376161517058368,0.0,0.0,0.1397482511000626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273562674272296,0.11651426560494295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227342247650788,0.09752268209552198,0.13443393837893933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173056382346011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375481654729782,0.0,0.13248290221440506,0.0,0.1722528114430946,0.0,0.12221105839054215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366490797040363,0.11005123766292592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282312983883782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23553146421354426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279504330171986,0.0,0.24787924932344485,0.1854743593132885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16906896621785633,0.10646907370967064,0.0,0.0,0.11526813399074864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196815195145892,0.0,0.0,0.1253696471661085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086601990087522,0.13706022261592246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737757194720212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226150782054478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781311235207343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018278178004621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963434777902616,0.0,0.11002751119659612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661923531384391,0.0,0.1481645592665612,0.15704448348003433
mentalhealth,bersitious,2020/03/25,"Does my stomach hurt because I have anxiety or do I have anxiety because of poor gut health? I don’t know if anyone has wondered this and found any answers but I’ve recently learned about how gut health is strongly connected to hormones related to anxiety and depression. So now I’m wondering if I have digestive issues because I have anxiety or if my gut health is causing my anxiety by not producing the right amount of hormones. 

I should note that eat fairly healthy, I don’t eat a ton of sugar or oily food, I’m vegetarian and have a lot of protein too. I’m reaching  out to see if I should try a rigorous fermented or IBS diet and see if that helps. 

TL;DR is my anxiety causing or caused by my stomach issues",6.456329787234044,6.331796574468086,7.686586879432628,71.34562500000001,65.52482269503545,11.589007092198589,40.320035460992905,11.20814326018867,4.799275886524823,571,32,104,16,8,196,77,141,0.158,0.76,0.08199999999999999,-0.7935,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,4,0,14,14,5,5,0,31,23,17,0,7,12,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,5,6,0,6,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,3,13,1,11,20,3,4,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,13,2,67,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140917150017206,0.0,0.5494822318778978,0.0,0.0,0.0837063458199007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21892840974503133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36893570825385263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310891818765801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476194433291347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24499325199508498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475783730134145,0.13125949045876498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817490243952286,0.0,0.0,0.08024132357742432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815559881283628,0.0,0.0,0.24989923404256525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579131697402986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017759946211138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820247389007207,0.0,0.0,0.10223453217279682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19079205392799492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127749483263966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596480057483201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Blondegirl2320,2020/03/25,"Why do I get so angry at my family all the time? I suffer with OCD and an anxiety disorder, which I have had for years but recently I am feeling a new overwhelming anger.

An example is today: we are redecorating our study and I have spent the whole day sorting out all the stuff and putting this places. My mum constantly kept asking why I was so slow and why I wasn’t done yet. But I am the only person doing it all day. To be fair on my mum she has been working all day so has no way of helping but it annoyed me that she kept going on when I was trying my best.

later in the day when my mum had finished work and my siblings were free I asked if they could help me sought things out and tidy. I asked my sister to take some things to the shed for me while I was sorting the paper work as she had already said she couldn’t do the paperwork. Our shed is just in our garden so it’s not far at all. She said she didn’t want to do my mum said she doesn’t have to and if I want stuff put in the shed I should do it myself. I said fine and asked if she could finishing painting some of the patches on the wall so we could put the paint away to give room to out more things. She said no. She was painting the room yesterday so is perfectly capable and it is only a small section which only needs a paint brush and then I could have put the paint away completely. I got so stressed and started shouting at my mum. She continued to tell everyone in the house how I was in a bad mood and I was the problem.

I just got so angry and felt so overwhelmed I wanted to cry. I don’t know if my anger was reasonable or if I am just getting angry for stupid things? It seems to happen daily now a days.",1.9859225818845443,3.313996119777162,3.503112092978583,91.99590529247914,76.66016713091922,6.845874555758332,22.407165498030924,7.503015589744147,0.6518123331092109,1313,36,303,17,29,434,162,359,0.156,0.748,0.09699999999999999,-0.9808,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,5,0,1,5,17,15,4,3,23,0,43,0,0,2,6,62,72,37,0,16,13,6,2,0,0,1,0,6,3,1,16,19,0,3,5,1,2,5,8,10,0,0,26,9,54,5,33,39,11,53,0,3,0,0,37,23,0,11,24,224,70,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151393384496873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06344026403683653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101087334354624,0.0,0.1558285742462205,0.0,0.06924203933719654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702860308649113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694921285170105,0.0896165139193589,0.0,0.2648474242194318,0.0,0.09109333392494223,0.2674109046328669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09504352802419752,0.0,0.0,0.0848648998488193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924197105202432,0.0,0.0,0.07817784166951736,0.0,0.04193126592758158,0.0,0.07962460154170561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866536945090351,0.0795528101297326,0.04713031769273855,0.0,0.13265138841850588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333361659610525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111707813448982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956886391593957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04557547026661058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061490614695243424,0.0,0.08009310006867856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892131457288204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241018267620307,0.08664288954066543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07935161056648103,0.0,0.3334651809626549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852645630984247,0.08188213250607651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3944211417578105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549521616855552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05869739355862899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949945988543388,0.0,0.1898671482787088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062352096709307935,0.0,0.07248337961667438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203766969284378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04835641894157845,0.0,0.07860675501660158,0.0,0.0,0.05630317524350159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467405697713363,0.0658249789047105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244908847487188,0.09258698383843984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111934524391288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0534033937784055
mentalhealth,csproton,2020/03/25,"Helping mum with short term memory loss Hi,

Please move this to the relevant subreddit if this is not it.

\---------------------------------------

Ten years ago my mum's mum died and this had a huge negative impact on her.   
Over the last ten years, her short term memory has gotten worse and worse.  
Imagine Dory from the finding Nemo film level of bad.  
She constantly losses things because she moves them around and then forgets where she puts them, then constantly stresses about not knowing where particular things are.  
Conversations from just a few minutes ago are repeated over and over and over.

The doctors say it's not dementia and is a form of MPD.  
And as is always the case, they treat the symptoms instead of the cause.  
So I checked the medication that she has to take daily (but always forgets or overdoses because she's forgot that she took it) and it's nothing but multivitamins, fish oils and anti-depressants.

Over the next three weeks she's staying with me while the UK is in lockdown due to the coronavirus.  
I want to use this time to try and improve her short term memory so that her life and everyone around her's life is much better.

Here's what I've been doing so far during the first two days she's been here:

. Made sure she's taking her ""medication"" every day.

. Give her tasks to do like helping me paint the garden fence.

. 1g of lion's mane mushroom capsule a day.

. Three 30 minutes sessions of brain training on the Nintendo switch.

. Make her do/find things instead of just doing it for her.

. One 30 minutes walk with me while I'm walking the dog.

. Consistent bed time.

​

Is there anything else I can do? Anything that's proven to improve her short term memory?

It's tearing my family apart and it just breaks my heart to see her struggle all the time.  
I just want my mum back.",4.343531590413947,6.164531135294119,4.661111111111111,84.07351851851854,71.47058823529412,7.742919389978213,27.592592592592588,8.401726058763845,1.917040305010894,1406,51,267,23,27,442,179,340,0.055999999999999994,0.855,0.08900000000000001,0.9024,0,1,0,0,0,0,85.0,0,0,3,4,18,9,0,2,20,0,18,8,2,4,2,43,32,24,1,3,11,4,0,1,0,0,6,1,2,0,19,17,0,2,3,3,1,6,4,5,0,7,7,3,34,4,32,25,8,55,0,2,1,0,33,20,0,2,28,173,53,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186717733463774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752675543448656,0.11411300426820775,0.1279740137919605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333699245842688,0.18751233286838975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098374743102771,0.08793689783131403,0.12840287045013965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931460248235331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757074418110007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819154080212996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276246714845607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20376596898162724,0.0,0.09071103023853468,0.0,0.10930440976223828,0.0,0.0,0.10779837590051504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798044223630863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887357312624636,0.10063674003620036,0.0,0.0,0.09928530328354904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19251916711876585,0.08958421833297034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010315034556499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248034255956073,0.14118610217914293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05788052331809456,0.08584897536290341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14877973367209668,0.05145350374896582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965530725532046,0.07030119595990605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21219546069303735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238746858834372,0.07742152329862241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11200786471567926,0.0,0.0,0.10105634283431818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136682489768796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560854591157214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587460244278564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375383123828115,0.0,0.0,0.08392554241348886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225595406701153,0.0,0.0,0.12064246538581032,0.11010220087759998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926183435349208,0.10946668228733664,0.15837343932616238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20990762910475155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842369251104427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117013193716221,0.07150463239326696,0.0,0.10288128000493738,0.0,0.0,0.09096173058497717,0.0,0.0,0.12423965378268766,0.0,0.08448048373716703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146579513383858,0.0,0.0,0.1279740137919605,0.13564386108467302
mentalhealth,milkshake_baby,2020/03/25,"really confused so.. i don't know who i am. i tried looking for hours on the internet what this means, everyday i feel like someone different, i dress differently, i think differently, i have different interests, some days i feel like i'm insane and other days i feel happy, every day i feel like someone different. one day i like kitten socks and the next day i'm throwing them away, this can happen even in one hour, i look at a t-shirt with a bee and i love it and the next hour i'm selling it because i hate it. some days i get dysphoria and i get disgusted by having a girl body, and i feel like mentally i am a male and i have to change myself and cut my hair, and the next week i'm perfectly fine with my girl body and embrace it and want longer hair. i get easily influenced by tv shows and feel like i have to strive to be someone else like my friends, etc.. i don't know whats going on, if this is a minor small stupid issue i shouldn't even be thinking about. i don't have amnesia so it can't be d.i.d, i don't have money for a therapist, i just want any small response from a person who ever experienced the same thing in any way possible or any solutions or whats going on with me, thanks.. i guess i consider this a vent",2.939822521419828,3.9671734922480617,4.753076295389636,85.17097307221545,73.76744186046511,8.687392900856793,25.59445124439005,9.134995656068208,1.8545085271317827,963,31,211,21,19,329,126,258,0.07200000000000001,0.745,0.183,0.9706,5,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,1,1,7,19,4,1,13,0,19,5,4,1,2,41,48,17,0,4,4,0,8,7,1,1,0,0,0,4,16,15,0,0,11,2,2,3,6,5,0,2,0,11,34,14,19,44,4,28,0,0,2,1,9,9,0,7,22,128,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869842676346847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769104546004961,0.0,0.0,0.050407749748355685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18370242417589056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747625874335048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199736559050079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4319731925069037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06907783446663103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222247643433924,0.10923343253284516,0.07479886778791729,0.0696708495617707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508667414665394,0.29537282482331234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063886967505157,0.0,0.12960811876668982,0.0,0.09399055781971104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910936103479222,0.0,0.07312349956710262,0.08802625322435344,0.0,0.08164037842262722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24430233995223866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630806344362044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908897729309042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827909893436172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887945796816958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07463197983404025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007489018876974,0.0,0.0,0.08333321717196336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638288876864979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206730931063734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220271148959492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322183266316353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05297405994167584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21019179671436333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613088926326844,0.0,0.09601078375113144,0.054936317239064066,0.10597028363952196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056141854195192534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975467503918758,0.06563637578320082,0.06632984243910284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YourStandardDart,2020/03/25,"Just a guy suffering from Perfectionism as a Freshman (Vent) I’m not sure myself if this vent should be here, but given that this subreddit involves perfectionism (it does have a toll on mental health after all), I’ve chosen to post it here. If it does not belong here, I sincerely apologize.

I’m 14 and an honors student, currently in 9th grade doing well (95+ overall average) and as the subject says, I’m suffering from some serious perfectionism and perhaps other mental health issues as a result (inferiority complexes, Imposter Syndrome and possibly even Depression). 

Ever since Middle school, teachers have praised me for my intelligence and how brilliant of a student I was. It felt great and I was greatly motivated throughout middle school, but I feel like that’s come back to bite me right in the butt. Ever since last month (February 2020), I’ve been feeling the opposite of what my teachers, parents and counselors said about me. Meltdowns (I happen to have High Functioning Autism) over the smallest mistakes. My first meltdown over a mistake lasted 6 hours over being wrong when correcting the teacher (Tried to correct her over the pronunciation and use of the Latin word “Deus”). Following that meltdown, I had similar experiences when I made mistakes or just couldn’t understand material fast enough. I even considered self-harm and drugs/alcohol (don’t worry, I didn’t do it and still won’t, but I remembered imagining myself smoking my problems away once).

Every mistake I made or expectation I had that wasn't met would place me into an inferiority complex riddled with paranoia and overall pessimism. I overthink as I keep asking myself: Am I good enough? Do my classmates and teachers hate me? Are they making fun of me for getting that question wrong? Will my parents abandon me? (I actually thought they would do that when I failed a World History Exam, but I can assure you that my parents are not abusive and are in fact amazing people and love me dearly. They really do) Why am I like this? Why am I so hard on myself? Will I succeed in life, making a mistake like getting a 99/100 on a quiz? (It’s happened a few times to small degrees, with scores like 90 and 95).

Then, it eventually came. Comparisons. Unhealthy comparisons, might I add. Despite being 14 and still trying to make my way into society, I’ve been comparing myself to people who have already succeeded (Oversimplification: 14 year old kid compares himself to Bill Gates). I’m aware that I’m only 14 and am not an adult just yet, but I really can’t help myself. 

I used to think that I really was brilliant, like my teachers said, but now I’m just an emotional wreck and feel like I’m behind everyone else. My mom said that I can be skilled in something, but there will always be someone better than me (I find this to be true and fair), but now I feel like everyone is better than me. I feel like all this time, I really am the worst. I feel so inadequate despite my grades and have even contemplated suicide multiple times (like self-harm and drugs/alcohol, there’s no way in heck I’m getting close to that approach).

I’m just beyond lost. I know that these mental blockades of Perfectionism will not help me when I grow up into an adult and I want to stop, but I just can’t. How can I learn to accept mistakes? How can I stop overthinking? How can I stop comparing myself to others? Just how the hell can I get myself out of this predicament?",4.873455510007234,6.9659896865203805,5.637319749216303,76.49865866891732,70.63009404388714,8.418664094526164,31.07800819869785,9.057496981413335,2.920788425367736,2732,120,467,56,52,889,300,638,0.156,0.655,0.18899999999999997,0.9799,4,0,5,0,0,1,96.0,0,1,3,11,37,49,2,0,25,0,53,5,1,14,10,121,100,51,1,15,25,4,8,9,0,9,3,4,1,4,30,32,0,5,20,0,1,5,13,21,1,1,20,12,75,28,55,64,7,65,2,8,0,2,28,28,3,7,38,323,105,13,0.0,0.0804712903935793,0.06627781361115928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14516659148853026,0.0,0.0,0.07494879806993197,0.0,0.05651291231049201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349381964431487,0.0,0.06381085291607473,0.052224468290799436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013525612540032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767967990645086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05850502790887916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584973586996922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887035851867128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05673646826104036,0.07639819685974818,0.0,0.14035414303471866,0.0,0.13457687026085172,0.12287077673985165,0.057223535963487865,0.12979641979117232,0.0,0.06643647848798917,0.0,0.0,0.2060471788796812,0.19408148538712014,0.06521157960991954,0.0,0.062075487103928365,0.057770704840138964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14193664240843484,0.0,0.0,0.05696608912358615,0.0,0.14975886265443833,0.0,0.06724913571978709,0.1201186790048908,0.0,0.06084085973956964,0.06705460260819637,0.0,0.1443865380791621,0.0,0.0,0.0910475169432728,0.0717587093267726,0.0,0.0,0.06688518858869627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708883644087931,0.0,0.060368313783953964,0.0,0.0,0.037325755482668296,0.1107238732180432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04797223350333047,0.2986301281685287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414012059033259,0.0,0.06129831642533744,0.1285306150644087,0.13600664438282342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20533500221918896,0.07204987680848822,0.0,0.07954431216194939,0.05421120753883549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126813197566959,0.07233006368767618,0.0,0.05165442119240597,0.0,0.0,0.22624348535799704,0.0,0.0,0.09417107166635844,0.0,0.07095947206662201,0.0,0.0,0.07656692759650062,0.06504631926638463,0.0,0.0,0.06498800332358393,0.0,0.0,0.07608329383380512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740391020503816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693743964439999,0.058001288396052335,0.19381566893319632,0.05401082862288921,0.0,0.13747254324687064,0.0,0.0,0.14170580923125595,0.0,0.0,0.11236433748043408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057546390942410125,0.05228631285879224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847822059454264,0.1703465496865969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429086818928006,0.0,0.06401156633428898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043518877515127834,0.0,0.053919014974443145,0.11880995580772925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222323059939563,0.0,0.0,0.07070465230590868,0.0,0.11731805863039943,0.0,0.0,0.04005958025688966,0.10781971323065168,0.0,0.0,0.0610661096045829,0.0,0.1225702016633184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689736541936455,0.0,0.09649347717563143,0.1485145419230119,0.0,0.043736729570901585
mentalhealth,Tyjo_Dunseph,2020/03/25,"Away from girlfriend makes me depressed Hi, I am away from my girlfriend and I am kinda depressed, just waiting to see her...  
We call and play games and stuff, but I still miss her a lot.  
I cannot do things properly because all I am thinking of is her..  
I just don't enjoy life that much without her with me...  
Any help what to do to help pass time or something?",1.5500386100386088,3.4895692162162177,2.4058301158301165,96.64283783783787,79.81081081081079,4.769111969111969,24.08494208494209,5.288315135182226,0.167002316602316,278,10,62,1,7,87,51,74,0.126,0.759,0.115,0.0408,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,1,1,16,13,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,2,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,1,14,2,10,13,3,5,0,3,1,0,12,2,0,3,2,48,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16174440594549402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4469309727294247,0.0,0.0,0.14498958338589224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24286881507723102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40971527931370827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188482323341967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16799867110258854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20220937624293414,0.0,0.0,0.15876500389786516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17484522532582064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895336044639576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18310656885553292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18994526179598667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722783984902672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801526132411686,0.15240302684489818,0.0,0.0,0.1386907469301665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292764312426962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bebero1190,2020/03/25,"Am I alone? I’m not sure what I’m hoping to achieve from doing this, it may just be that I need to know I’m not alone or it may be I just need to get my thoughts out there. 

Since everything that’s been happening with COVID-19 I have started becoming really disillusioned with life. I have started feeling incredibly overwhelmed and am constantly on the verge of breaking down in tears, right this second I feel as if I am about to have a panic attack. 

I am feeling incredibly trapped, isolated and lonely (even though I have a caring husband and two lovely dogs). I am scared that a loved one will pass away and I won’t be able to do anything or spend any more time with them. I am scared that this change to our day to day lives will become permanent. I am scared about what the future holds. Ultimately I am just scared. 

Recently I have caught myself wondering if this is it, and if anything is worth it going forward. 

I just don’t know what to do, I don’t want to feel like this. Does anyone else feel the same? Does anyone have any tips to improve mental heath during isolation? 

Thank you for listening.",3.551977573904182,5.383500752293578,4.2351681957186535,86.26974515800205,73.58715596330275,7.596738022426095,25.41386340468909,8.344100000000001,1.5667667686034652,876,29,176,15,18,279,120,218,0.175,0.7,0.125,-0.9148,0,6,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,1,1,1,9,15,1,6,6,0,30,3,0,0,1,38,57,12,0,7,11,1,5,1,0,5,1,1,0,0,16,9,0,1,9,0,2,4,5,8,0,3,3,6,22,7,24,46,2,20,0,2,0,2,7,8,0,9,10,122,38,1,0.11381538451051018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357568268577369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15479672872596836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591647263785,0.11661731151089201,0.1873207275057984,0.0,0.0,0.12948143080309898,0.1069333003209767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514003003424753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160423699062101,0.0,0.12040158543069485,0.0,0.0,0.12299399699975397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14680301459488693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19920121994697776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507814928737672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517398805073576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022899287396879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28774239089090364,0.0813097334356976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059463840849981735,0.0,0.06468390589388825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064656864156453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11304435771153848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509991759505346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039117200057659,0.05560444783470126,0.0,0.10050106971728777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054456563400558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114699137922465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878533093008538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712425010962465,0.0,0.0,0.13353783082855322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291304972691541,0.0,0.11237896141383268,0.0,0.0,0.09719771649528006,0.0,0.0,0.4557962205975321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414926220282498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16111822992221655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072696529514075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478591447811501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182303740930567,0.09035670199952632,0.06636666598715531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118109264457653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713126263922943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12342792946239613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Orion0212,2020/03/25,"Some woman just told me I’m too young to be depressed Someone just told me I’m too young to be depressed. I was chatting with some girl and I asked how old she was, she said 22, so I told her my age, I’m 16, and then she said said I’m too young to be depressed. Said I’m too little to be depressed, that I’m just a kid and I don’t understand what depression is, and that I’m just dealing with social issues that’s totally normal for kids in high school to deal with, that I need to just enjoy doing kid stuff because depression is for adults I guess, she called me and my issues cute and adorable, and continued to talk to me like I’m little by saying she has a nephew my age and that I’m such a cute innocent little boy, various other things. She pretty much just made me feel like a little kid.",2.396932126696832,3.519151200000003,3.808823529411765,91.04662895927605,75.23529411764707,6.877828054298643,22.488687782805425,7.321109707123232,0.6167556561085976,624,16,141,7,13,206,79,170,0.115,0.7559999999999999,0.129,0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,13,12,0,0,4,0,11,0,0,2,1,27,33,11,0,2,6,1,1,2,0,0,0,5,0,8,9,11,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,10,6,21,6,15,19,5,14,0,6,0,0,31,6,0,3,10,87,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725607438446453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06341707050456588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622851938349508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21450528392066245,0.5376167476641677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05260181192460788,0.07432063264265756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146032096014776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991574315599784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21716520066223216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164976728373633,0.4170704244403464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09843779386254303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647564551146352,0.07713856659882333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192947908579847,0.0,0.0,0.10916430580953664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583815929430887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3958338248821874,0.08273059008798522,0.0,0.10528615199665577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060477384824826,0.08814615515974293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909199261557216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361715088905723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691143786620741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982217087134493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830120100684258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imjustsuchafool,2020/03/25,what’s a crisis hotline for germany (please just for texts i don’t want to call anyone!!) I’ve been searching for it but can’t find it. It’s also ok if i have to text ppl in german (well what do i even expect) but i rly couldn’t find a single hotline that did texts/sms. ty!,-0.05469945355191541,1.6274727377049203,2.1094262295081982,98.04698087431696,83.91803278688525,4.066666666666666,16.724043715846992,3.1291,-1.0585759562841537,211,4,51,0,6,71,42,61,0.047,0.8029999999999999,0.15,0.6884,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,1,7,0,0,0,0,9,8,4,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,4,2,6,5,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774117712216231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425570191528724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3542185355612552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291208469904192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6341114110482761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807864914146548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20460763296282225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119002261211433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,prmaa,2020/03/25,"do your make up (during this pandemic) if you’re prone to falling back into depression or bad mental health in general, please have a read.

during quarantine/social distancing, many of us will experience anxiety, loneliness, and existential crisis (more intense than ever). this causes our mental health to become weak, which can result in us succumbing to our insecurities and self-esteem issues.

if you ever look in the mirror and feel ugly, try doing your make up. i know it’s pointless to do your make up when you’re just staying home + nobody’s going to see you, however, the purpose of this is to do it for yourself.

i can’t speak for others, but personally, when i stay home for too long (in my pjs and barefaced), i start noticing my flaws more. make-up is fun for me. it enhances my beauty, raising my self-confidence. 

so if you’re feeling particularly low or un-pretty, try dolling yourself up. i promise you’ll feel better :)",4.788251231527095,6.791080879310349,5.939901477832514,74.61310344827587,70.66666666666667,8.419704433497538,29.095238095238088,9.04235418022936,2.7024824302134656,739,29,124,15,14,246,111,174,0.113,0.748,0.14,0.875,1,1,0,0,0,0,36.0,4,6,0,1,8,8,0,1,3,0,11,3,0,5,2,24,22,13,0,3,7,0,3,0,0,2,3,1,2,1,8,5,0,0,4,1,0,2,1,5,0,0,0,6,20,3,22,20,2,21,0,2,2,0,12,10,0,5,7,83,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948148237903057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099993977803384,0.1085793197867489,0.0,0.14362075102195676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501124403523574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358856403497513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120046556492011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23526017830561236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720565613558102,0.0,0.0,0.19725884921048129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390564872721612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764563193521062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608846930375195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13572966406744333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146747276479239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508274039355385,0.10920220790379463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34721516113357204,0.1318417905400132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26210273110341553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480532448194816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135473255247234,0.0,0.1427466465862031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132299077041135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300768098259815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10362633357240864,0.0,0.2713235386903327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920441270485127,0.2772141259290203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17657944590576066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3128481114289846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brigetwhipple,2020/03/25,"I feel like I can’t talk to my therapist anymore So right now I’m a mess. I’m home from college because of the current situation and my anxiety and depression are out of control. I went to therapy from age 14-18 and I go intermittently now whenever I need to but I feel like I’ve gotten too close with my therapist to the point where she feels more like my friend than my doctor. This makes it really difficult to talk to her about my problems because it feels like I’m dumping it on my friend which I refuse to do. Also, I feel embarrassed telling her about how far back I’ve gone with my progress because it feels like I’m failing her. I was doing so good for so long and now it’s back to how I was when I was 14. I know I need help but I don’t know what I should do.",1.2692971887550186,2.9552240421686804,3.2982891566265065,91.12642971887553,79.66265060240964,7.077269076305221,24.31967871485943,8.021203637495839,1.1989611244979923,605,22,141,11,15,205,86,166,0.142,0.659,0.19899999999999998,0.9241,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,16,15,1,1,3,0,10,1,0,4,0,27,29,13,0,4,2,0,6,5,2,1,1,0,1,0,8,8,0,2,8,0,0,3,2,7,0,0,6,6,27,8,20,22,1,19,0,2,0,0,11,7,0,0,14,89,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033874357480298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959846178239254,0.0,0.12443305834430518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19295819713629447,0.0,0.2294570254076508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407258768770077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806759016746467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842441185930184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3806500426223319,0.4481808856016445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19387645218880606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130779797875632,0.10523873401626538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410025653724665,0.0,0.12585717943923955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791065223644772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30649283450984466,0.0,0.0,0.11103747743443038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375255813212419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18606962757450413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861021367882785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005835930181673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803796392331521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071511535375099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14103414125405234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20169693074132555,0.10966678018636952,0.0,0.143486494593275,0.2913619295521184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631244537604968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,miomioamica,2020/03/25,"I am afraid of going insane For the past month I’ve had very scary thoughts and I hear thing and feel things. 
I know how this sounds but I feel like the government is doing telepathy experiments on people and I’m one of them. They send me thoughts and messages through radio and television. Stuff like - the windows are getting dark or 11275. i try to tell myself this isn’t real but it’s so hard. Everything makes more sense in my head when I stop pretending it’s not real. 
I had this happen before but not like this . I don’t want to go to hospital not now with all the corona thing going on. I don’t want to be quarantined in hospital or get covid19. I didn’t tell anyone about this. I’m scared and confused.",1.4847916666666665,3.900304562500001,2.58805555555556,92.53750000000002,83.2361111111111,5.822222222222222,20.805555555555557,7.1686216300943375,0.5563972222222215,563,17,118,8,16,179,90,144,0.11199999999999999,0.789,0.099,-0.41100000000000003,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,5,6,0,3,4,0,11,1,1,2,1,29,28,14,0,2,8,0,3,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,11,7,0,1,5,2,0,4,7,3,0,1,5,5,15,3,14,22,2,13,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,3,8,76,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331313088502412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13789748598464002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564523619305808,0.15852159508005953,0.0,0.0,0.16388048755302626,0.11577264230160712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16933485539093418,0.0,0.2763000092349163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433053423971544,0.0,0.1451700985882683,0.0,0.1663159269009911,0.0,0.18264857989690744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906158832230336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237516724414164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081734548033946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935133357235312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981315327743027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547005264750689,0.11234903497819007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689097870671684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224605154865546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135485842453183,0.0,0.0,0.18551503360258872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832876930447778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3229878684112347,0.0,0.0,0.2573082876582504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11002519964009937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371294495194186,0.19116933061730115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,peteywheatstraw1,2020/03/25,"PSA in NY Phone for help in NY
https://www.newzjunky.com/mental-health-hotline-launched/",24.93666666666667,33.17706266666668,6.27555555555556,66.10000000000002,33.44444444444445,8.044444444444443,20.11111111111111,8.841846274778883,1.314244444444444,80,1,8,1,1,14,7,9,0.0,0.748,0.252,0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6598843004914006,0.0,0.0,0.4161110019595476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6256231645433188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mattrepyneck,2020/03/25,"Advice for my panic attacks I’m in no way claiming that I have any kind of mental illness because my appointments have been cancelled due to this pandemic and I feel terrible for asking but today I had my drivers license test and my anxiety (not saying I have the disorder, I just got incredibly anxious) got very bad and I failed my test. I’ve done these maneuvers before it was just the fact that I couldn’t get through the impending doom, chest pain, fidgety nervous energy I had. In the past this has been an issue and I had an appointment for bipolar disorder and anxiety disorder and whatnot but again it was cancelled and so I’m kinda stuck. Because of how sure everyone is I can do it I have another appointment for tomorrow for my test and I was wondering if I could get some advice so I don’t get to the point of no return. Any help would be appreciated and I’m sorry for the long post.",3.1541313559322037,5.30979959322034,4.991041666666671,78.98283368644069,75.66666666666666,8.718785310734464,29.706567796610173,9.354420925462401,3.0312601694915253,716,33,132,19,16,244,98,177,0.28800000000000003,0.6459999999999999,0.067,-0.9907,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,6,10,1,2,8,0,22,4,1,1,2,25,34,15,0,4,6,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,8,9,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,12,2,20,2,14,18,1,12,1,2,0,0,3,3,0,4,7,94,28,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724180229131347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895781736474747,0.1461611915685249,0.2132639276622739,0.15746954060193136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030960601066105,0.15857475396891546,0.0,0.0,0.11638373115709184,0.1699400993532255,0.0,0.11860950595235605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129052419981264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4792545332145144,0.0,0.0,0.14264302125158065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319186354932466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047910817627523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184745072945297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22296373236686104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342929853322487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14548557463698125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14515186752885356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335460145716763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14047101166313547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483193903226155,0.16354259091701095,0.0,0.0,0.13306227365030526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176736337279668,0.0,0.13349583130340456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084747834647256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15603422288358895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137218765343814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13212417673650134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501026452324853,0.0,0.11064025152349363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511610848443271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990177238020449,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DonCipriano,2020/03/25,"IMPORTANT TOPIC Hello! Sorry for caps title, but I have a really big problem and I need urgent solutions... my girlfriend suffers of bipolar disorder or borderline disorder (it's not sure yet, but she started mood stabilizers treatment for almost 2 months) and the problem is that she is running out of meds and because of the corona virus she can't reach the doctor to reach another set of meds (all the public transport is closed and she is at her parents now in a small village and they will never understand that a major depressive episode can be more dangerous than this virus... The corona measures in my county are also very drastic). She started to reduce her everyday meds quantity and she is very unstable and depressive right now (she tried to hurt herself). PLEASE HELP. What we can do to stabilise her without meds and with some home ways. We thought about an online therapeut, but we don't know how useful he will be in a such unstable situation.",5.970940659340659,7.805429874285713,6.382285714285715,73.28125274725275,67.4,9.4989010989011,34.604395604395606,9.851270322608157,3.828626373626373,768,37,122,18,13,248,115,175,0.247,0.6920000000000001,0.06,-0.9899,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,3,0,1,0,7,9,1,0,10,0,16,2,0,2,3,33,23,14,0,3,6,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,5,14,0,0,3,0,0,2,5,7,0,0,1,0,19,1,19,18,4,21,0,4,0,0,21,9,0,3,8,92,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302906244285473,0.0,0.0,0.10623928048501782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930373776554233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098350452025825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288452618420936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045128787899993,0.13597655926867738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904587026706792,0.0,0.13325835775021908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14221757963495107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07301032454077393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5902610679071594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603878756038744,0.0,0.0,0.09850583458269782,0.10246132246116607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751306952910087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582828510902815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542370624549013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510645772048334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345230216559522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493278185159128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487135554504226,0.188062382169326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252085904758122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054672499269538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901957362843868,0.0,0.0,0.13830047227828934,0.0,0.1147388636122348,0.0,0.2192286414411306,0.0,0.105449335895134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280616749998761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HufflepuffsNWoozles7,2020/03/25,"Coronavirus SI Urges Hello 👋 So I’m not positive if this might be triggering or not, but just a warning ⚠️. I’ve got anxiety and depression and have been having a really hard time during this quarantine of falling/staying asleep. I keep having incredibly-visually self-injury urges late at night when I’m trying to go to sleep. It’s really disturbing and getting harder to shut off so I end up staying up until 4 in the morning and sleeping in until noon. During the day, I’m a zombie who forgets what she’s doing or what I was asked to do. I’ve been having really no motivation either to work on my grad school studies. Idk what to do about any of it, but I need these urges to stop and to feel well-rested so I can function",2.656767151767156,4.563515175675676,4.8756756756756765,80.38366943866946,76.29729729729729,8.067359667359668,24.8981288981289,8.841846274778883,2.0504671517671524,578,20,110,13,13,201,98,148,0.163,0.795,0.042,-0.9493,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,6,2,0,1,5,0,13,3,3,2,0,22,23,16,0,2,9,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,4,2,7,0,20,17,1,20,0,1,0,0,4,8,0,4,10,73,16,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128581982000256,0.0,0.14464691784069034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676578576688345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219419992630402,0.0,0.1628557178283443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16747018838313654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560534574795057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878733971664047,0.0,0.10745943912132452,0.0,0.15122584035025338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693799875144339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16806442707684652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21329229739511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005857130631757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020162158580993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17744028682087676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633915726022921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19136068883974264,0.0,0.0,0.1972533614831744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3784363347130998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4030716866959953,0.0,0.1580806965502554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025501018802646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12837400485735545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700070795622269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765366758059647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hocrm,2020/03/25,"could working out actually be having a negative impact on my mental health? ive struggled with very bad body dysmorphia and eating disorder habits for years (i have been and currently am going to therapy), i also have exercise induced asthma so working out can be hard for me. everyone always says working it so beneficial on your mental health and wellbeing but when i do it, i become so obsessed with it that its all i ever think about and i never feel satisified with the workout i did. afterwards i just feel like i didint do enough and like no difference is being made. my only goal when working out is “lose fat on my stomach, hips, thighs, arms, get rid of hip dips” and the list goes on. all my friends are so petite, when im with them i think “i want to look like her, i need to workout”. i struggle to eat healthy, because i always feel like im eating too much food (i dont calorie count as my therapist advised me not to). a lot of peoples goals when working out is to better their wellbeing and have more energy etc.. mine is literally : look like *insert name* . im not overweight and im aware of that, but i hate the way my body looks. i have chunky thighs, hip dips, a pudgy belly, bat wings on my arms, back fat, a double chin. ive cancelled plans a couple times because id think “i need time to workout” and if i got a lot of homework when i was in school i would become very stressed with trying to balance time. scratch that! i cant balance time. working out just takes over my schedule, its like “if i dont workout, my whole days and week will fall apart” 

should i stop working out completely or am i maybe jumping into it too quickly? how can i ease myself into it when i have panic attacks over feeling i havent done enough? it makes me very depressed.. i also emotionally eat so when i feel like crap i binge then feel even worse.",2.9743153927068704,4.762835437500005,4.110329593267881,86.7370546984572,75.05978260869566,6.704908835904631,26.544880785413746,7.4822170145007005,1.4003692847124825,1443,54,288,18,31,470,189,368,0.134,0.741,0.125,-0.5195,1,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,2,12,24,20,3,5,9,0,34,23,13,4,4,59,56,32,0,8,9,0,8,7,1,3,7,1,1,0,11,23,8,1,10,5,0,3,9,11,0,0,6,12,51,9,37,43,11,44,0,2,3,0,8,17,1,5,30,195,62,12,0.0,0.0,0.07007776749242324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485542908341345,0.11950601606892962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169606770191233,0.0,0.055218691548416916,0.0599596905688705,0.08755137570481311,0.15862055145415024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635115288789568,0.0,0.15953300868615927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529310152761792,0.0,0.0,0.057335723197095186,0.07945817500970206,0.0,0.0463125443733576,0.0,0.06185123012548646,0.0,0.0,0.07502784286222414,0.08230232074986404,0.0,0.0,0.07348820433080287,0.16832533237642555,0.0,0.0,0.29392479864371435,0.0,0.08077839000223723,0.0,0.14840116875142778,0.08008892207090132,0.04743088780471424,0.06495770797830756,0.0,0.06861906595801807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21786063099053213,0.15390667479621822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683487776583727,0.0,0.0554814678557204,0.0,0.0375185996769166,0.0,0.040812189997862965,0.0,0.057434300601484085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432909280747348,0.07089909269552064,0.0,0.15266475602091684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102754251603933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455846598743129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809109858546401,0.08033881725310107,0.0,0.12210331705942155,0.0,0.06794987694513538,0.047934803937062065,0.0,0.07214440931807603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14473841505990542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05278979239477944,0.10649479031261916,0.05538553679018378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054615961526945256,0.0,0.0842554457459308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049785124954968785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710747057097655,0.0,0.07267717805815073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06003771725738765,0.0822599508556119,0.15014616295053512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05399338986542565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212282871520821,0.08337880823754762,0.0,0.1380419304985744,0.0,0.0,0.16749569738325987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04875536593030001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17775628443506178,0.04235634517994594,0.05700070946218709,0.05760293788968812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017509239759826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659579257808533,0.0,0.07318216049130412,0.051012903787994085,0.0,0.0,0.046244319158297936
mentalhealth,ninjaturtle7778,2020/03/25,"Peak depression during work from home and Coronavirus Pandemic Hi all, 

I have recently shifted countries and I am on the lookout for jobs in the Euro region. I am away from my family and having a lot of relationship problems with my wife. Also the work from home makes it terrible for me since I cannot go out and venture out / do any activities. I think I am mildly depressed - I have been taking tests to see whether I am actually depressed or not and the results are not that positive to be honest. I just try to keep myself as busy as I can. But with the added restrictions of not going out to do anything, it makes me sick mentally. What are you guys doing to cope that ? As soon as I am not doing any activity, I start feeling dull and that is what I had read about depression in the first place that it comes back to haunt you as soon as you are sitting idle or not in your normal routine. So if anyone is actually going through such a scenario, please help me. Please advise what do you guys do to make yourself busy apart from work. I have reached to such an extent that even though I am apart from my parents I do not feel like talking to them at all - probably coz of the depression. I really want to find a solution to this however I cannot trouble the doctors or any medical authorities because of CV. So any advise would be appreciated at the earliest. Thanks",5.004787277984307,5.89178928252788,6.117887236679058,77.81806175134244,68.81412639405205,9.546551011978524,31.30132176786452,9.725611199111238,2.9431163155720785,1083,44,208,24,18,362,145,269,0.13,0.779,0.09,-0.9369,3,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,5,1,4,12,12,0,0,13,0,30,3,0,5,2,43,46,22,0,5,13,2,2,1,0,1,3,0,2,2,12,12,0,2,4,1,1,4,8,9,0,1,2,3,31,3,42,41,4,24,0,6,1,0,16,13,0,5,7,161,43,10,0.0,0.0,0.21200394595511304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08686708014308528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954739026352278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595286937261046,0.0,0.08938881792939851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205641885183896,0.08352563814199951,0.0,0.06621656834753556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357050345432666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4677911882038275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118191517909358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174554594537323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240163709321144,0.0,0.10984775697764948,0.07760145985709475,0.0,0.0,0.0992809470928499,0.09239605774092298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852016473745164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151109301569556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280880210771945,0.0,0.21791872816865807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779318766570564,0.09655056523092524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05306850907256905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234877892480113,0.0,0.0,0.21752335898130445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942789033266524,0.1094680817539834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642907760975064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061480061269796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11348962240422004,0.23847445637550366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711572704316325,0.1039391041561457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865402884115416,0.0,0.06958772169529047,0.0,0.1072537209808246,0.11662220471538433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865597691990029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985541930457229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688507465986738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167220586900595,0.08730836575733676,0.0,0.10000696832185647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960227905881705,0.10672315086949824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374899581972727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406962318938209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23724008064370675,0.0,0.0,0.07716382302598741,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nillabean1988,2020/03/25,"Looking after your mental health during the Coronavirus outbreak Useful advice from the Mental Health Foundation.

[https://affportal.jaagnet.com/JAAGNet-Groups/uki/blog/looking-after-your-mental-health-during-the-coronavirus-outbreak#.XnuEoGMcfeY.reddit](https://affportal.jaagnet.com/JAAGNet-Groups/uki/blog/looking-after-your-mental-health-during-the-coronavirus-outbreak#.XnuEoGMcfeY.reddit)",86.71705882352941,110.42093511764703,39.78382352941176,-175.02779411764706,-96.29411764705885,10.458823529411768,37.911764705882355,10.125756701596842,6.6214941176470585,375,5,6,3,2,75,14,17,0.0,0.847,0.153,0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16123077650981818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7015260160793071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385538772225386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.665102845850661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14250232635957294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,13Direwolf13,2020/03/25,"Is something actually wrong with me? I’ve had some issues in the past with anxiety and depression, but was only briefly diagnosed with anxiety. I was prescribed meds, but stopped taking them after I left the job I had (dr said it was anxiety from the stress, not chronic anxiety). 

Fast forward 5+ years, and I’m questioning if I actually have a disorder. I second guess myself on having symptoms because I’m not sure I actually have them. Am I having insomnia because of stress or something else? Am I feeling apathetic or am I experiencing psychosis?

I feel like a hypochondriac because I can’t narrow it down except that I don’t feel right. I’ve been having a hard time concentrating and my emotions have been seemingly bipolar in outbursts. My wife is actually diagnosed with a mental illness, and is medicated. I don’t want her to feel like I’m trying to “upstage” her by also having an illness (like how some people pretend to get attention), but I don’t know what to do. 

I know the smart thing would be to just go and see a psychiatrist, but this compounds my fear of “pretending” and with the quarantine still ongoing, my options are increasingly limited. I’ve looked up illnesses online (terrible idea, I know), but am I fitting myself to the symptoms or is it vice versa? I feel so lost",6.147330246913582,7.19808448148148,7.474688786008233,68.52339120370371,66.32510288065842,10.848662551440327,36.998199588477355,10.820120047756994,4.474432304526749,1031,53,173,29,16,353,134,243,0.221,0.72,0.057999999999999996,-0.9901,1,1,2,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,2,2,5,12,0,3,12,0,30,12,0,1,1,46,51,18,0,3,13,1,6,3,0,1,12,1,0,0,7,11,0,2,12,2,0,3,6,7,0,1,9,10,29,5,22,40,3,19,0,2,2,0,7,10,0,10,11,125,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.4152809037409102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507917007071279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32554888901618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19456106976288415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916326092536272,0.21596500120624176,0.0,0.0,0.12193090392282108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887427983346005,0.11967320022891613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971709766087177,0.2689671387133559,0.15200851208633387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05558381259294515,0.0,0.06046326728298933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719937487345862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530356329062868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010012570794246,0.0,0.1110423776541188,0.10557457359875183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17540568206498053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559185817470236,0.0,0.0,0.1559287373771709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933988670812139,0.0,0.1161360589791295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11817409143145458,0.10717563059281927,0.10721499478883093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091355744188362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156024938596953,0.07375667213709729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191799234969331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085554483044328,0.10120021287205802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477818424232868,0.09685246476685047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16380675579213194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496231813899661,0.08894588959289004,0.24373626583277525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027028529158878,0.2211576188242949,0.0799912174063392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068006212155993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06203622692242827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223108394521445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275093348040693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557562671291136,0.11631956801995225,0.0,0.06851096767251262
mentalhealth,somewhere121,2020/03/25,"I’m worried I might kill myself or lose it again if I go too long in isolation I’m a medical student and I checked myself into an inpatient psych facility at the end of my second year due to suicidal intent and psychosis. I’ve basically been depressed my whole life. That was my first episode of psychosis. It happened after extensive isolation while I was studying for my boards. Now I’m worried I’m going to relapse if I go too long like this. My rotations were canceled. I’m all by myself in a tiny rural area and I’m staying at home due to Covid-19. No other medical students within 2 hours. The hospital doesn’t seem to have anything for me to help with. No one is returning my texts. The school is supposed to have online assignments for me to do but apparently nothing yet. I’m just sitting here with my anxiety going through the roof. I’m not scared of getting Covid-19 myself, odds are I would handle it well. I’m worried about my parents though. And I feel like a worthless medical student. The students in more populated areas are being put to work from what I’ve heard. I’m just sitting here doing nothing fantasizing about killing myself. I’m currently on sertraline and abilify since my hospitalization. I don’t know what I’m looking for here, just venting I guess. I have no one to talk to after all",2.778692810457517,5.392867549019608,4.381960784313726,80.46771241830069,79.3921568627451,7.2287581699346415,30.62091503267974,8.285830014693849,2.722111111111112,1055,54,187,22,27,352,141,255,0.12300000000000001,0.8079999999999999,0.069,-0.8324,3,2,0,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,0,3,15,9,2,1,9,0,18,4,0,1,2,25,42,11,3,3,8,1,1,2,0,2,4,1,1,0,8,8,0,0,3,0,1,5,6,6,1,4,5,3,26,3,34,34,4,34,0,3,1,0,4,10,0,6,18,130,34,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954957982365624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272573379352903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075172357874548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056370615576457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06311858520164584,0.08917968815255355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618165729143186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521933548765359,0.0,0.28377859881525674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13751603195685666,0.0,0.11038813221762092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367196027864122,0.0,0.1252162282544048,0.0,0.1229339367115233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27621524153286986,0.0,0.06860415824545678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817221931860593,0.12197278501017746,0.0,0.0,0.2209439966980236,0.1048270669433257,0.13965457986788868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3772639774959098,0.0,0.13242655336019574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395584883506173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16917818527138945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13861066950326734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549019192936356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497816404153507,0.12633619854918887,0.0,0.11364195973194355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326195263794484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13305382873759256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13654546067570705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033487573154884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264636942045402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223856001233512,0.0,0.0,0.13936997366268228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908788591007335,0.3803175120674076,0.0,0.08867675539595211,0.0,0.0,0.08038742894337751
mentalhealth,marcellecraig_lmft,2020/03/25,"Free IG Live on Productivity... Or not during social distancing! I am a California Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and will be doing a live talk on being productive or not during this time of social distancing.

Check it out if you're free and are being challenged by the pressure that you should be doing something or having difficulty doing much of anything.

Friday, March 27th
3:30pm PST/ 6:30pm EST

https://instagram.com/marcellecraig_lmft?igshid=bgm67a3pk3rb",13.213333333333333,14.567980333333335,10.93277777777778,48.74000000000001,51.22222222222222,12.2,37.444444444444436,11.698219412168324,4.986127777777779,392,14,46,9,4,119,54,72,0.079,0.83,0.091,0.4389,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,1,0,4,0,1,3,0,12,0,0,0,0,11,12,7,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,5,6,6,1,5,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,4,2,36,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23455928071279145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26870535819555164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5033817439775514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095333091806006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.581113985419651,0.0,0.21943364614909733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291001038678577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33094726864801616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16620603223710373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aggraban,2020/03/25,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me Let me just start off by saying how I’ve been going to a counsellor once every few months for my self-esteem issues. While I still have pretty bad self-esteem issues, I am definitely more comfortable with where I am now than just a few years back. 

I don’t think I am depressed. While I’ve had the occasional periods of really bad sadness, I’ve never wanted to kill myself. Sure, the occasional thought of suicide do come to mind, but they are never prolonged. In fact, the reason why I went to find the school counsellor was precisely because of the occasional suicidal thoughts. While I was down most of the time, I never actually wanted to end my life.

I am in a University pursuing something I really have no passion or talent in. In fact, I absolutely hate it. I’m only in it because of my parents, and also because of the future prospects with regards to career options. My GPA is horrible but the scary thing is, I don’t care. I have zero motivation to do anything well in school. In fact, I have zero motivation to do anything at all. Even things that i enjoy(ed) doing. I’m in this vicious cycle of low motivation and I’m doing nothing productive with my life. The only time I actually do work is when I’m in a group project, or if I’m responsible for other people’s grades. I don’t care if I do badly. Just not other people.

I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I feel like a lot of the symptoms of depression apply to me, EXCEPT the suicide part. I don’t know if I do have anxiety, but I get panic attacks from time to time. Sometimes I get crippled when doing school work. I get socially exhausted pretty quick. Maybe I should go to my counsellor again for these issues but every time I go into his office, I am not in that depressed state of mind to say what I feel when I’m in that state. In fact I can’t really recall how it feels like to be like this when I go to see him. As a result I cannot convey to him this feeling of loss and hopelessness to him. I’m just really tired all the time and I want this to end.",3.288428571428572,4.61035268809524,5.290178571428573,80.51169642857144,73.30952380952381,8.20238095238095,26.220238095238088,8.751876143730069,1.9391666666666665,1619,55,322,31,32,561,182,420,0.20199999999999999,0.665,0.133,-0.9909,1,0,1,0,0,5,45.0,0,0,1,6,19,28,4,1,18,0,38,6,0,7,11,65,72,24,4,7,16,1,4,3,0,1,5,2,0,0,18,11,0,0,15,0,0,6,14,18,1,2,7,7,50,10,57,62,8,54,0,7,1,1,10,18,0,8,31,232,68,12,0.0,0.0,0.14978300633915878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613725011443456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05870928673575434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630827055835844,0.0,0.0,0.08730787997636273,0.0,0.059011737403954975,0.19223520598473995,0.1403480953886046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564921431761255,0.0,0.0,0.0661085398619189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19829962180884586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594559021720853,0.0,0.0,0.05068897899389816,0.0,0.12932100174959685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552171796199422,0.10965248690384456,0.0,0.0,0.07014302804965024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12028740756870328,0.0,0.17446253589130933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576924630056135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403037703817777,0.0,0.0,0.08490635250656578,0.0,0.12653021196975042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784763897549102,0.108413735508667,0.1124803709904902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524537869703488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710010538929188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549800145522529,0.0,0.061256680026298325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775701304063107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736383602329818,0.0,0.0,0.08173032420323273,0.0,0.11673521010060957,0.0,0.09004306512501183,0.08521561881019507,0.08310675010427837,0.0,0.1064098636922494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561533717258092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966578143223835,0.07890606634987535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206051837297367,0.0,0.23300841218236146,0.061155382746486485,0.0,0.1601223770514296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823129218398528,0.0,0.059081619501862234,0.07590221376173957,0.0,0.054320109813446,0.0,0.061288209121903324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518378845344785,0.0,0.07233072670651564,0.0797668583455487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197119200463572,0.04917473851026338,0.0,0.12185302624947215,0.2685018016482667,0.0882064445090665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357975777255756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690024684253538,0.07114286498536378,0.06924992049540721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174173305397657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678159957479824,0.0,0.049420903358446205
mentalhealth,pppleasehelppp,2020/03/25,"I’m having a really hard time right now and I’d really appreciate some advice. For the past few months I’ve already been sort of self isolating so recent events have little effect lol.

I’ve been feeling incredibly depressed and lethargic all the time for a few months, and because of this I’ve gotten behind on all of my university work. I have 5 assignments due by the end of April and I’ve started 2. Now that uni is cancelled I don’t even have an excuse at all for not getting this work done because I have nothing but free time.

I wake up feeling anxious and shitty so I distract myself with tv/ video games or any other ‘productive’ task like cleaning or exercising, but I just seem to have a mental block about doing this work, it’s daunting, I know that I need to do it, but I just can’t seem to make myself do it and the longer I leave it the more stressful it becomes. I go to bed every night feeling like shit because I’ve gone through yet another day where I’ve gotten no work done even though I KNOW the solution is as simple as just DOING IT Even now I’m writing a reddit post about it instead of doing it.

Any advice would be appreciated, thank you for taking the time to read.",5.684902193242444,5.585075572614108,6.497845287492591,79.13677385892119,67.13278008298755,8.877415530527564,30.492294013040905,8.418075326091056,2.1651372851215185,947,32,186,12,14,314,134,241,0.155,0.74,0.105,-0.9388,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,5,17,8,1,2,12,1,21,3,2,2,3,34,40,16,0,2,9,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,14,7,0,1,8,5,1,2,4,4,0,0,7,4,16,5,25,31,7,28,0,1,0,0,5,6,1,6,21,123,30,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340921987127771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217848030255402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629068848768533,0.12559813163193512,0.0,0.1353155367460811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21904746471060085,0.13228586974340711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724718085134924,0.0,0.10316498961630008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451498481542347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608814032428836,0.0,0.0,0.23733757782687684,0.0,0.1009184965732865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18169072537716208,0.08556973712038599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257928804705043,0.0,0.06807284428791112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729794990406118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165418960395872,0.0,0.0,0.12682806687342682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703538513510026,0.12004945770457615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995303473178082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070848919609448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19121200639305036,0.0,0.0,0.0888141910395432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124039462138126,0.0,0.11493063778185245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143420683823608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471462987149228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981084765840745,0.0,0.15346626373365024,0.0,0.11826675331125637,0.0,0.0,0.10229012810354887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21808357534225034,0.1249550292771496,0.0,0.12295084114945752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477979201991276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372057913583786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09005847569263148,0.0,0.0,0.11027588920707204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768170317130106,0.0,0.27937507218952884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3488005057720173,0.0,0.0,0.08508716284071373,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,windystary,2020/03/25,"Depression? Am I getting better or worse? This is my first time posting about this on Reddit but I have felt depressed for a few years now and at the start it was a constant feeling of a thickness? The best way I could describe it is by feeling as though there was a layer of though tar on my brain I wanted to scrape off (that probably weird and gross. sorry). I felt embarrassed and anxious about the smallest of things (like people looking at me or just certain words could just send me on a downwards spiral). And I just lacked empahy for others (I never would say anything but never would feel like bad for them or like I wanted to help them) like when my mother was feeling pain was just 'oh, okay' (and it still is??). I don't felt embarrassment for most things anymore and I don't feel that thick tar feeling, so is that good? (this is a very messy post but, am I getting worst by just a lack of care or better because I don't hold onto words and spiral don't downwards?)

(I'm not on medication for depression or anxiety my therapist says I don't need it.)",3.7135604265402833,5.112749085308059,4.373030213270141,87.19850266587679,72.36492890995261,6.791587677725119,26.45764218009479,7.1686216300943375,1.1966324644549755,831,28,167,8,16,265,110,211,0.23,0.616,0.153,-0.9703,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,2,4,14,21,0,2,10,1,21,4,1,0,3,46,39,20,0,9,14,1,11,4,0,2,3,2,0,0,13,7,0,1,9,0,0,1,8,10,0,1,7,14,21,11,24,28,6,26,0,3,1,0,7,12,0,6,14,126,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786504899723634,0.12975536043274868,0.11390696776388134,0.0,0.0,0.09451726463070402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590053369731716,0.07001556859588769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053500391983685,0.20316280680029752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821804489608934,0.0,0.0,0.11710404428639425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411927198023415,0.0,0.183407432638679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967776812685511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484499433770157,0.08205363810532865,0.3308412861484168,0.0,0.0,0.09769703686237556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001575386582493,0.0,0.0,0.09633633732551462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698601430992416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22445269695950554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645068728987717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570602574385976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516477595254912,0.1771691110110102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221560993263272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962716298352421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200019081890967,0.0,0.12383493172601172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18267729048968145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857265444931135,0.08129615220460515,0.0,0.09172469632763136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335746287487402,0.152611354692841,0.0,0.22569221803384884,0.0,0.0669738561801318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476879318778457,0.1354908962900314,0.0911678897387017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117048773628636,0.16318178604005038,0.0,0.0,0.07396393886749479
mentalhealth,ambivalentspirit,2020/03/25,"I’ve been up all night experiencing paranoia. It’s 7:07 AM, lights are on in my room, haven’t slept. All night I dealt with fear and anxiety. It wasn’t over the COVID-19 situation, though that is on my mind a lot; More and more lately I feel I have a paranoia-based obsessive compulsion. This morning kind of solidifies it. I couldn’t sleep. Couldn’t. Kept turning my phone’s flash on to make sure the room that I KNEW was empty, was truly empty. And again. And again. And again. Then it’s lights on permanently.

Bruised my fingers getting my sliding door’s shoddy lock to lock properly. Because oh, what if someone climbed up on my balcony? Better check. Is there someone under my bed? In my closet? In the attic entrance in my closet? In the vents? Are the cats inside? Better check.

I know it’s irrational, but I’m compelled to check. And again, and again. It’s frustrating, it’s draining. It happens at home, it happens when I’m alone. Housesitting is a nightmare alone, especially at night. It’s not as severe in the daytime, but it’s still present. I don’t hear voices or anything, but I FEEL this presence of fear. Which I personally believe is an evil getting at me (now y’all really think I’m crazy, huh,) possibly in the form of a mental illness, but I don’t know, and I don’t know if I want to know. I just want to not be afraid or anxious.

Normally I’m very conscious of when fear is settling in, and I take the necessary steps to get myself out of that state of mind. I’m proud of my ability to do so in a way, but then there are nights like these that set me back. I feel so vulnerable and paranoid and afraid. It’s as if logic and reason go out the door, and there will magically be someone or something in the room with me, because I wasn’t there watching to make sure, and I can’t rest until I know that it’s not the case. 

I know I should speak with my doctor about this, but I just don’t feel comfortable doing that yet. She and I have seen each other twice in the last couple of years. I don’t feel I can open up to this person, and I wouldn’t know what to say.",1.8691588235294103,3.868624171764704,3.2968088235294104,90.35038970588236,79.04705882352941,6.226470588235292,23.56617647058824,7.268377926160553,0.8508411764705883,1623,55,349,21,40,531,190,425,0.12300000000000001,0.8,0.077,-0.9631,0,2,1,0,0,0,66.0,0,1,0,4,21,16,2,6,18,1,33,5,3,4,4,75,68,38,0,10,17,0,6,1,0,3,2,4,9,2,28,23,0,1,17,0,3,4,15,8,0,1,9,15,42,8,51,52,8,59,0,0,2,0,8,30,0,7,23,234,70,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19776480242127173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303744518733353,0.1078585869299142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856707090596254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341370975004237,0.0,0.1164002822952499,0.0,0.0,0.1075666459233766,0.0,0.16887821192984573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564030464784842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772181370868853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223048059472751,0.2413729343121095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496438711062588,0.0,0.054260146098166484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885490890822755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760627902914052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576833302173718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994216104400588,0.36729058010953297,0.07782415558132129,0.1076989728673878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046643835456817134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116868787318053,0.0,0.0,0.12745944115952348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621546341397952,0.0,0.19280330161290765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583839992215536,0.09354437255928187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16672864870635268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107632731993028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06116316997207062,0.09816330288453937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592485717233466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078585869299142,0.0,0.0,0.10731691801160563,0.09554307643093128,0.0,0.2426847518073922,0.07350064676085037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624576047940182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17996646802965993,0.0,0.07178466096983926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117596496633153,0.09380284420243958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384843317532888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877615294040607,0.11262622651558662,0.0757829173901073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061482207004105276
mentalhealth,rabbithole421,2020/03/25,"Survival in many forms blog Hi everyone!

I recently created a blog called Survival in many forms... you can find it on Instagram @survival.in.many.forms and click tbe bio link to read about me and topica I plan to write about! Please share and repost and help me get it out there! I've been brainstorming a way to be a voice for mental health and I'm trying to do it through blogging. So any love and support is very seriously appreciated!",4.645679442508712,6.9137885853658565,5.095644599303134,79.39378048780492,71.6829268292683,9.075958188153312,27.567944250871076,9.606745405546679,2.631677351916376,352,13,66,9,7,112,60,82,0.022000000000000002,0.743,0.23399999999999999,0.9592,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,3,4,4,0,0,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,10,9,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,5,3,12,7,2,6,0,0,1,1,7,4,0,0,1,38,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355643629075062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24558968607282364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298195633592301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198236494425496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12565761534664538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556530541419503,0.0,0.0,0.16121015219456902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170715084159061,0.0,0.0,0.4876829221207799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423795696281089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640099980626932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405771282999646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374766262075253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729302154344155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632918891139722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19844762337734068,0.0,0.1909072642839648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fr4nky2,2020/03/25,"I fear that I completely overthink everything when I get feelings for someone. I don’t know how I’m supposed to think or feel about anything. This is basically just a rant that describes how I feel. When I see you as this perfect someone, I take everything you say so personally, and it becomes so easy to hurt me. I constantly feel sick and become so much to handle, which makes me feel like I’m hurting you so I try to keep my distance, but that leads to us growing apart and me constantly thinking that you hate me and want nothing to do with me, bringing me back into this cycle of feeling sick and anxious and just not knowing what to do. I start to act out conversations in my head to try and work out how I can talk to you and apologise for all this things that you may or may not even recognise. This worrying makes me fear that I’ve been toxic and possibly manipulative, but that fear also makes me question whether or not you’ve been this perfect person all along. I start to fear that some of the things you’ve said personally target me and make me worry that those words themselves were manipulative and I honestly don’t know how to feel about anything anymore. Regardless of any feelings and worries, I still feel like I need to apologise to you, and make sure you know that I do care for you, and not necessarily want to be with you anymore, but don’t want to ruin our relationship.",10.181398601398598,6.978734765567765,9.606307026307023,70.39399600399602,60.318681318681314,12.71115551115551,42.03429903429903,10.637119530657019,4.25500293040293,1113,47,217,19,11,359,127,273,0.16399999999999998,0.701,0.136,-0.9111,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,2,10,0,4,18,15,1,4,2,0,14,3,1,12,5,76,50,33,0,5,13,0,9,2,0,2,2,2,0,3,22,20,0,1,16,0,0,4,7,8,0,0,4,12,40,7,32,43,4,17,0,3,1,0,21,5,0,7,10,155,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894014076026378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05862408522625631,0.0,0.0,0.097389985262262,0.17098943542364078,0.0,0.0,0.14188292458536986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06628827907091414,0.0,0.0,0.19041891588386356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789433522566663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038696836561493,0.18631945576048567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569392689180853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495556138886704,0.0,0.0,0.3880298106947248,0.39230211457482106,0.123173371476005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0450398829815202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08511210082467124,0.08847380969842256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457391491841305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662522495908776,0.0,0.0,0.18950964380837693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423330171507945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28772102086151485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337246305976774,0.06392180058858864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271846226173395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258193033466083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718605148563048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657217735959513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255463859965922,0.0,0.0,0.0820031144470458,0.0685556980813943,0.0,0.0,0.06869625021269025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14608674237039376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203628487762792,0.0,0.06884545496803135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124958878099715,0.0,0.064817343457799,0.06929035734762766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11454492157256906,0.110476624922726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705852537843855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369705942686858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525423267545383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627601178206724,0.2626438327109549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AlternativveUse,2020/03/25,"Does anyone else ever feel like life is an endless battle to ""keep up""? I feel like I have to keep up with a lot of stuff, and there's no end in sight. The thought of it is so depressing; if I manage to do a thing (and I'm like ""Yay! Good job!""), soon I have to do it again since it's not enough that I do it once. Whether it's about shaving your legs or taking care of your body (the hair always grows back and you have to do it *again and again and again*, your body gets always dirty and you have to wash it *again and again and again*). Same with working or studying: if I manage to go through the day today and I get to head home, I only go home to prepare myself for the next day to go through it *again*. For the next 40-50 years. It feels like I never get to rest. This is so depressing, and it's making me so anxious. Same with... well, just basically everything in life. It feels like I just have to try and try and try, until I die. How do I get rid of these kind of thoughts?",0.7080818159141913,2.239816725118484,2.162853579446246,99.3356697430781,80.80094786729858,5.200399102020453,18.21426789723123,5.750287758089431,-0.6273943127962087,743,15,187,4,19,240,102,211,0.1,0.805,0.095,-0.4927,1,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,0,5,0,1,20,13,1,0,8,1,13,8,5,2,2,38,32,22,1,2,8,0,5,5,0,0,3,0,2,0,16,15,0,2,6,0,0,4,3,3,1,0,2,6,19,10,30,30,5,28,0,2,1,0,5,4,0,5,25,130,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841949209137224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504074400385673,0.0,0.07739241099431615,0.11340822940933085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510870713699781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24588862456201604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284910908186005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142763280523778,0.0,0.19066291080792552,0.0,0.1148719007744081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685979447509142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924617831306318,0.0,0.09803264514278884,0.1143655459399921,0.0,0.0,0.1001194774738356,0.0,0.0,0.09947510840782113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22385942295640804,0.316288989455082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313100453887521,0.0,0.1887117909939254,0.092835989616261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359310672196155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22204896158760876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983620172775332,0.19676099370065125,0.0,0.1152597349301881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15635792591350967,0.2703716066901436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940990737072638,0.0,0.0,0.0738820329773965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536586612466207,0.0,0.23542611591902826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787421507706072,0.0,0.08417971785018848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155845721601943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670601909997575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832201465940386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353313678366187,0.0,0.0,0.17574052181910818,0.0,0.0,0.10491492701939438,0.0,0.0,0.2254403016783197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09951767453892628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057883780281737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127648456759336
mentalhealth,l_exquisiteDouleur,2020/03/25,"Getting rid of my toxicity Hello everyone, I (22F) am hoping to find some good tips here. I am looking for some good book on toxicity which I could read. The problem is, many books are written in a way so they help ppl who got out of toxic relationship or find themselves in one and so on... I’m looking for an exact opposite - I am the toxic one (I do realise it).
I’m also sure it originates from my childhood (lack of affection and attention, emotional abuse, etc.). I’m searching for some good book that would help me to get to know the roots of my toxic behaviour and hopefully provide me with useful tips on how to work on it. 

Many thanks in advance!",3.604418604651162,5.105950720930236,5.448751937984492,78.9740581395349,72.7984496124031,8.570852713178295,29.95426356589148,9.120678840339163,2.634283100775194,509,22,99,11,10,175,81,129,0.047,0.726,0.228,0.9740000000000001,0,0,0,0,1,0,21.0,0,0,1,2,5,8,0,0,5,0,8,0,0,5,2,26,22,8,0,6,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,4,4,0,1,0,1,0,2,2,2,11,7,21,18,5,12,0,0,2,0,6,8,0,6,2,67,17,5,0.0,0.18843301557606645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718195056849532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12697822247768614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17889538677019842,0.0,0.0,0.1773684606673314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519668112230191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907141459056245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618069263555124,0.0,0.0,0.4001784452553817,0.12719653634708206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21319849718357173,0.0,0.0,0.3159195469804613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740265789021409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26710230120165696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32247741436517874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155353761044322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15217707312305548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15908018667579826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707463799965379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498906307718397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642003945182544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373570341741394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262362862781896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578093856957132,0.0,0.0,0.11297542762577185,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AMixOfPersonalities,2020/03/25,"Mental Health Lanyard * Anyone up for Mental Health Lanyards to help raise awareness of specific conditions and in general. 
* Please let me know I need my target audience (people with mental health conditions) to give me feedback for a project I'm working on",5.342500000000001,8.766297340909095,5.273818181818182,72.9257272727273,75.5909090909091,8.065454545454546,33.8,8.841846274778883,3.956814545454547,209,11,28,5,5,65,35,44,0.0,0.8859999999999999,0.114,0.6124,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,9,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,16,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13906634247459004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19079043401817555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6342224122423229,0.0,0.0,0.13330969445544155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093030370463208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20337532680399995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6012936393180793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474721137646546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13788313192775434,0.0,0.0,0.218318087885938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447920294783686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sceptreglobal,2020/03/25,"MARRIAGE AND FAMILY PREPARATION COACHING   

As a [marriage and family specialist Sceptre](https://www.sceptreglobal.com/marriage-and-family-preparation-coaching.html) provides family start-up workshop that addresses your unique need. Sceptre provides [marriage preparation course](https://www.sceptreglobal.com/marriage-and-family-preparation-coaching.html) which incorporates essential life skills coaching, counselling and guidance. It helps couple who plans to get married to form their family vision and put a right strategy for successful marital relationship and learn essential skills to lead an effective couple as well as family life. 

Visit: [https://www.sceptreglobal.com/marriage-and-family-preparation-coaching.html](https://www.sceptreglobal.com/marriage-and-family-preparation-coaching.html)",26.668571428571425,31.996792523809525,17.933428571428575,-3.588428571428551,22.57142857142857,18.14857142857143,56.085714285714296,15.6451,11.000745714285717,708,33,40,24,5,192,53,84,0.0,0.8290000000000001,0.171,0.9118,0,0,0,0,0,0,62.0,0,1,1,6,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,2,0,9,2,8,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,5,0,0,2,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,7,2,1,4,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,0,0,23,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3762995944873167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8015089603569682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888406626658101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397651236586165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402133764292333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608503280108455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17094059186136384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825629837751137,0.0,0.1452161417697403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035759975498175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528894456466792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leona_20,2020/03/25,"Could this be PTSD? Trauma or just a bad memory?? I was diagnosed with clinical depression 2 years ago and 7 months ago with PTSD because of abuse that happened to me (won't go into details).

Info: female, 21.

I am wondering if this trauma ill talk about now could be the cause of PTSD or is it just a bad memory and that abuse is the only reason I have PTSD?...

I was in hospital 1 year and 2 months ago for anorexia. I was still going to collage at that time and it was just really stressful to be stuck in hospital and feeling like a failure.

About 1 week into the hospitalization one kid (I couldn't tell if it was a boy or a girl) arrives to my room and the nurse says that I'll share my room with them because there is no rooms at their department. I honestly did not care at all and I just wanted to go back to college and move away. The kid looked sick, overweight, short, hair cut short in a weird way and they looked kind of scary by the way he/she talked. I can't forget the smell of sweat and dirt from them. I felt so sorry for him/her and I kind of wanted to make their day so I said that TV is all theirs. They gave me a scary sideways look and I just looked away while passing her/him the TV remote.


*I had IV fluids and heart/breathing monitors hooked up to me so I could NOT leave my room without nurses assistance*


I remember that night like it's still happening. I fell asleep around 11 PM with my headphones and music on. I wake up hearing some screams and talking while my music was going. I look and see its midnight and when I turn around to make sure I'm not crazy I see them standing at the window screaming at the who knows what. I asked her to lay down and to be honest I was a little rude but I was still in my sleep and scared so yea...I said "" what the fuck are you doing? Lay down!""  She/he looked at me and started talking about her ""baby""(?) and kept saying how she has a baby who needs her. I just said 'okay' in a concerned way and turned around and put my music on. 

I couldn't fell asleep and I kept checking her (I'll refere to them as a 'she') every once in a while. She was just sitting on her bed and stared at me. I was half a sleep and decided to turn around...when I did she was laying on floor crying and screaming ""babies,BABIES"". 


Next day I told my nurse about that while she was talking my blood out in exam room and she just said ""I don't know his situation so just push it through"" I guess they didn't inform everyone about him/her from the department...


Next night she tried to get into my bed while I was sleeping. I was a very light sleeper back then so I woke up immediately and screamed at her ""I'll call the police if you don't leave"" I have no idea why did I say that but its the first that came up to my mind then. 

She. Did. Not. Leave. and I couldn't either because I was hooked up to 2 monitors and IV. I didn't to hit her so I just kept yelling and she layed down in my bed (which was not allowed in hospitals) and wanted to put her hand around me. She smelled so bad and I pushed her off. I was discharged from the hospital the day after she went back to her department. Since that day I can't stop thinking about it. I am having mixed emotions between feeling sorry and disgusted. 

I have dreams about her just sitting there and touching me. I keep seeing her face on other people which is the reason why I have social phobia and didn't talk to anyone for past year. 9 months ago something horrible happened again and 2-3 months later I was diagnosed with PTSD because of that abuse but I never mentioned that what happened in hospital to anyone.

I keep feeling like she is here or like I am living trough this again. I can't sleep with my windows opened because I feel like she will be there and scream trough the window. Its so real. I had a dream about her last night and she was bleeding. I had to take pills to calm down. Thankfully I live alone but I don't know what could this be.",1.3451605849391832,3.418351762607628,2.5773349733497355,94.46142954762884,81.18942189421894,5.490829574962416,20.000136668033345,6.605766666666668,0.07839554462211272,3065,81,679,30,81,982,308,813,0.127,0.8079999999999999,0.065,-0.9938,1,1,1,0,4,0,94.0,0,2,10,1,49,33,4,2,33,1,67,23,12,7,4,134,129,70,0,14,29,0,8,5,0,2,10,14,11,4,34,56,1,6,18,4,1,17,22,18,0,3,43,35,118,15,98,70,4,123,0,1,10,1,69,53,1,10,52,458,152,2,0.0,0.17999546981274814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795523422177384,0.0,0.0,0.05244634351651737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081540777944481,0.0,0.0,0.2253955605652458,0.04734027850673159,0.0,0.09515330990390468,0.11681393028181693,0.126843409675689,0.15434417843656786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051707697691895496,0.0579170965250696,0.051629452904406084,0.05201981675440962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16172328570614347,0.0,0.055624151572125004,0.13063089515282186,0.0,0.04361497336693247,0.10279427654109846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056961637164262474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04266522544756123,0.048387376098272906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241764094346084,0.10852873109574876,0.048621021036240435,0.0,0.0,0.043073188413972535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04681459267793567,0.02645659144294098,0.0,0.1151163898400464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557841543023036,0.0,0.1791182748118502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05707341048964633,0.06000701424226574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571648436815609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001987291120643,0.0,0.10546467056351863,0.08348899168087279,0.04127723788590451,0.0,0.16085697617295294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236973711876759,0.05075320532647535,0.08942966693984171,0.0,0.25514214717564004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760335058243591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05113057563180225,0.0,0.1616770688833169,0.05382084426039594,0.0,0.037547898673789,0.03905562924320456,0.0,0.10770950398457826,0.14256275715300276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053928482780934935,0.03431404272457389,0.03851295604912418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04834029728268094,0.035106446461533346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959692128812495,0.1018116088778588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05763784126549626,0.032440399743946795,0.1041298803582196,0.0,0.0,0.05736369052553712,0.0,0.19267571337735265,0.1208096008577048,0.050698097437096565,0.0,0.12105728336049842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04188879374675023,0.056919935987205836,0.20270078176792986,0.05161970094457875,0.0,0.038984087375612084,0.0,0.1133715893099424,0.03584227929218283,0.0,0.12132021361200612,0.042336157807690636,0.05800637365584601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04772630462134583,0.0,0.0380739438196003,0.24420845090122315,0.04426039009155003,0.04662124223217401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032447186094764366,0.0,0.0,0.029527789365002555,0.0,0.0,0.048387376098272906,0.0,0.0343803022547946,0.1652408477125322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041782168792821116,0.089603918783632,0.12058375007476825,0.04061925036605815,0.0,0.0,0.04694251254661996,0.09138696515460452,0.0,0.0,0.048813827295217216,0.054915428531989205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782884241925463
mentalhealth,OBM1127,2020/03/25,Friendships while being ASPD I’m a diagnosed sociopath and I’ve hidden it pretty well until my oldest friend bluntly asked if I was a psychopath. I asked why he would ask that. He told me he saw nothing in my eyes and his hair stands up when I smile. I decided to test his loyalty so I told him I wasn’t a psychopath I was a sociopath knowing no one would believe him (he is a well known liar in our town) and I’m an active member in the community. He took it well he nodded his head and said it made sense and that was that. Do I tell others or do I just continue on with my life? He told me he’d keep it secret because I’ve done things for him other people wouldn’t have and he said I earned his loyalty and jokingly said as long as I don’t go crazy on him.,1.515252613240417,3.0058388353658567,3.512717770034847,90.7425609756098,78.32926829268294,6.393031358885017,22.0801393728223,7.1686216300943375,0.5821651567944253,595,17,134,7,14,202,93,164,0.049,0.782,0.16899999999999998,0.9559,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,0,1,6,6,1,0,7,0,15,5,3,1,0,20,32,15,0,4,3,0,1,0,1,3,2,3,0,0,10,8,0,1,4,1,0,2,4,1,3,1,14,6,26,5,12,13,0,16,0,0,2,0,30,7,0,2,6,87,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4021710897106852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741360548256805,0.0,0.0,0.16155954546534354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554514505259547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14674512763006192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107883252248452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149593645178273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471669028948734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745802491483482,0.0,0.0,0.07880735395891603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10128568697429816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12690201438359466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568590300391073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759348608114585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971696575673122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941356687270764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14588651017690588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092107400611036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12533547805813022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526673151993653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110665249025954,0.15931957153149334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3867939270569025,0.0,0.12939367391749212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20373052098135208,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zeldazonkisme,2020/03/25,"ADMITTED INTO HOSPITAL CANCER WARD. MENTAL HEALTH PEOPLE GAVE ME A HARD TIME I had a physical emergency and was admitted. My blood pressure was very high because of the physical pain I was in, and my blood work indicated some pretty serious issues. 

Mental health people came up to the floor I  was on and asked me highly inappropriate questions. I had asked for only one person to be in the room, but they actually lied to me. They wanted a witness. 
I don't do drugs. I take cbd oil, and herbs and they indicated I had a substance abuse issue. There were no drugs or alcohol in my blood. 

They wanted to call a family member to interview them about me. I was extremely offended, and became quite scared about what they were really trying to do to me. 

My family (immediate) did some horrible things to me. Just awful. But, because I'm the one that got raped years ago, they don't believe anything I am saying. 

I have been in many car accidents and have some serious spine issues. I had major spine surgery 5 years ago. They didn't believe I had any physical issues because I had been raped so many years ago. 
I had my MRI reports in my phone, but it had died. 

It was a traumatic, and scary experience. 

Why would they humiliate someone who is on the cancer floor like that???",3.7578130511463854,5.863385181069963,5.3360258671369785,77.41592592592595,73.73251028806584,8.90840681951793,26.386243386243386,9.48565724429506,2.602458906525573,1001,36,182,26,21,338,127,243,0.29100000000000004,0.68,0.028999999999999998,-0.9976,0,0,3,0,1,0,32.0,0,0,9,2,5,9,3,2,11,1,30,16,5,0,0,24,41,13,1,3,5,0,1,1,0,1,9,1,1,1,7,10,1,0,3,0,0,2,4,8,0,2,23,3,35,1,21,16,4,23,0,0,0,2,21,14,0,5,8,125,42,3,0.0,0.12150153122173185,0.10007116575860106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27270541979388563,0.1095916510213148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06973553665414102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438751623870434,0.0,0.19173536977397032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18753525998449905,0.0,0.0,0.2310709047678909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047120427872694,0.11728655036207596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642768774224744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378441321758543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031072977443392,0.19334453711869184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820162745101983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186204897484966,0.0,0.0,0.21800551946688854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166932584044584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4281300712016273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05009932757654695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20793330462822945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066866917052261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13897712218360636,0.07799168173585498,0.10911733224728618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421864785352931,0.08954016223288269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043272553253097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487620809840847,0.10907145136635038,0.0,0.0,0.06569429074690168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815495606959869,0.10266752505011408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688781528903024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710264839238735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812772895338952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05979603195301891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962274170848577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08461208759376912,0.12096985937484875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253279717158544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465550174148441,0.0,0.0,0.07284650943464868,0.0,0.0,0.1981108885232694
mentalhealth,Calahara,2020/03/25,"Can someone talk me out of this? I'm really scared I've inadvertently killed my parents or grandad or something. So before all this lockdown started, I offered help in getting items to people who couldn't go out. Unfortunately I had a bad mental health spell and my parents got me to move back in with them. I was really scared I might have the virus because I had a tickly throat but enough time has passed that I think it's okay.

An acquaintance of mine messaged me yesterday and asked if I could pick up medication for her very immunosuppressed mother. I'd offered, after all, so I said yes and drove into town. There was a queue outside the pharmacy because they were only letting in two at a time.

I was about 2m away from some old guy - the wind was blowing pretty much from him to me, same angle. The man coughed, no sleeve or hand to cover it, and the wind blew. Because of this incident I'm really worried that guy has given me the virus. The guy had a persistent cough, I don't know if it was new or not but I'm terrified. Not touching your face doesn't do much good if someone's cough droplets land on you.

My mum still visits my 87 year old grandad every day. I tried to do a good thing but I'm really frightened I've infected them because of what that guy did. The worst part is I might not even know for two weeks. I'm not going to leave the house any more but what if it's already too late?

My parents think I'm being silly. I really hope I am. Can anyone offer any support?",2.430418041804181,4.3447026468646905,3.7411221122112255,88.22860286028605,76.98679867986799,6.601100110011001,24.093509350935093,7.526774132740827,1.0592763476347642,1174,39,244,16,27,384,172,303,0.11599999999999999,0.779,0.10400000000000001,-0.7002,3,1,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,3,1,8,11,1,2,16,2,27,9,3,1,2,38,48,18,1,7,16,5,2,0,0,2,6,1,0,5,14,8,0,0,4,0,0,6,8,5,0,2,14,3,32,6,27,28,11,32,0,0,0,0,27,12,0,12,14,157,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582539489216053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042732359521322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705383712940709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965131810121556,0.0,0.09009895931817856,0.07373934101985502,0.08007049689734427,0.2338331665897561,0.0,0.08160180107591401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656643659771445,0.0,0.0,0.0618460236430954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908786394106722,0.0,0.06333946554382956,0.0,0.08079787063178115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05010254206653494,0.0,0.10900164098893113,0.1608687272433797,0.07669807739968296,0.0,0.0,0.3798148350324533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193467275540774,0.0,0.0,0.06427814509768606,0.0,0.0,0.09524796257133328,0.0,0.1106529639835085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060964946579266,0.0,0.10540563465516782,0.0,0.10817667864484727,0.1015417201768993,0.0,0.09806180127407244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660675095478576,0.09664223334065647,0.20346441468148566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10192398062420836,0.14099155175934594,0.0,0.0,0.09261850722387263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20125681541990048,0.0,0.0,0.07293445207102449,0.0,0.0,0.3194488343555435,0.1038477641327764,0.0,0.06648332663861875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975623429816008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30717231589180605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912205853833086,0.0,0.1920204698336645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16250746383996625,0.07382666364541157,0.0,0.0,0.0678768204086331,0.0,0.0765839534938575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882346893427902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707886464179214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637101094817707,0.12289462985129755,0.0,0.0,0.11183733263466594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510818083637271,0.0,0.1873560567768109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912556967469564,0.0,0.0,0.0769232765515433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738867573816563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06175491531983812
mentalhealth,spacekinder,2020/03/25,"""Its because I love you, dumbass."" I was beating myself up. I asked him why after all the shit he stayed. After the ups and downs, the lies and trauma, after everything, why he stayed with me.
He said it was obvious why and I couldn't see it. Not a mile a way... it was his response. 
This response wasn't out of anger or annoyance, and for once I heard something in his voice that rang a certain sincerity.
We've been through a lot and there are bad bad days like today were he will sit and listen while I panic, and help me wade through the paranoia and negative self talk. This week has been hard as I'm coming off my meds because of the shutdowns, so I'm physically withdrawing from the lack of Seratonin and other things. All I have been hearing from him is support. I've been a mess. He knows when it's bad I shut down and not think or rather think to much. 
I'm so afraid he will leave, and yet he stays. Even through my delusions of utter saddness.
There is so much wrong in the world, and yet one of my biggest fears, is losing him. Hes not perfect, but I'm glad hes my best freind. 

And I hope that yall have someone like that too.
I just had to get if off my chest.",1.6428315946348775,3.4122474262295093,2.8084053651266783,94.68182563338304,78.8360655737705,5.911773472429212,22.566318926974677,6.782984794422108,0.3939491803278688,908,28,208,9,22,291,139,244,0.134,0.7440000000000001,0.12300000000000001,0.736,0,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,2,0,4,12,23,3,3,12,0,22,3,2,0,5,37,40,23,0,5,9,0,1,2,0,2,0,6,0,1,12,16,0,0,3,0,0,1,6,13,0,1,12,8,27,10,27,25,7,29,0,1,1,1,25,13,1,5,12,140,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207393828395065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3270845684246265,0.1591997538440631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703482909912598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248243067211346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421279054471162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862463393901961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735617783544945,0.0,0.0,0.14693791904334194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822224990818399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116973327460789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717226449728138,0.0,0.08752449471855965,0.0,0.0,0.1296946230224732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176292112709685,0.0,0.0,0.13826453358027005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758881639535852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460847397068798,0.0,0.1110137782697049,0.1178528388768422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14504406988686022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919814939987532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13906260137043416,0.08848385488980258,0.0,0.0,0.1532065728812597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12421073494687278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405472748870602,0.0,0.1362225985732023,0.0,0.13403768679843708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063934436013832,0.10052625853626752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4175402043353444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817974472534248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10495462603969836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867510276219348,0.16733977567355862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377382673868186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364770218931324,0.10474276913308476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35348229127933023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276787194832322,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bluu_x,2020/03/25,"Disjointed brain? Does anyone else feel like their thoughts are completely disjointed? It's been worse with the current situation but it's something that I do have often. Like this morning I was trying to make oatmeal and I couldn't focus long enough to get it done in a timely manner. 

I'd walk over to put the kettle on and I'd suddenly think about how I needed to wash the bowl I wanted. I'd forget about the kettle and walk over to wash the bowl and then suddenly think about how I needed to get the packets ready. I'd walk to get the packets ready and then remember that I needed to get water to take my vitamins. I'd get water to take my vitamins, get ready to take them and then remember that I needed to take them with food and it would start all over again. It took me about half an hour to do something that shouldn't take me more than ten minutes just because I couldn't focus on it. 

It's bad when it's time for me to go to bed too. It's like this with little things, large step by step tasks are almost impossible to accomplish. I feel like I almost need something telling me what order to do things because I can't focus on anything. 

I just really want to know that I'm not crazy. I feel absolutely crazy and no one in my family understands it. 

Does anyone else deal with this?",4.232019433882549,5.0899801634980975,5.0490177439797215,84.88761195606253,70.55893536121674,8.277904520490072,25.25749894381073,8.515128840125781,1.4901070553443176,1025,28,212,16,18,333,120,263,0.06,0.8190000000000001,0.122,0.946,1,0,3,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,3,1,12,5,0,0,9,0,14,8,1,3,1,45,45,15,0,11,4,0,3,4,0,2,4,0,1,0,21,12,3,0,10,0,0,8,6,1,0,3,5,3,24,4,37,36,3,31,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,3,17,133,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978745236065755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13817116974705074,0.202471373033978,0.08130672111292903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249665263139494,0.12045918450203864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029719129879244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359341056187936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186189367814184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17292691792565032,0.10111010926948856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507500629481334,0.0,0.0,0.10209025057023556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314298523581713,0.0,0.14987379543127125,0.14117023584628616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947337752034805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30972396842586913,0.0,0.05615220874952583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973013765723806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054299725644811836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19308126304792486,0.09902689214488802,0.0,0.0874378369358201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595198927532298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3663070823131702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695169272725497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932463522836793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329594251074996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238498222196756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105908140463072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22819088909234764,0.0,0.0,0.06993350474836768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3714390356137063,0.0,0.08635846441013302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128108291282756,0.1266183673382776,0.0,0.07843880672449463,0.11522603129854952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109774133877392,0.06708097471664913,0.0,0.0,0.10285774989351132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11655352660741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068903317523974,0.07018705005962468,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HeatLightning,2020/03/25,"Coronavirus isolation for an anxiety-prone extrovert Hey guys.

​

Didn't know where to post this but needed to vent. It's been two weeks in isolation. I'm a very extroverted person and need lively social events to stay mentally well. This isolation spiraled into depression and anxiety, one that I hadn't felt in years. Knowing it's not my first time, I immediately got some medication to help with the anxiety. 

I'm feeling a little better now, but not knowing when this shit will end is really stressing me out. I feel so disconnected, and disconnection is very closely linked to depression for me. On top of that, I don't really have a steady job now, so nothing to fill my days with, and no opportunity to create something new as I can't really meet new people.

I read that regarding stimulation, what's too much for introverts is perfect for extroverts, and what fits introverts is way too little for extroverts. Extroverts feel starved for stimulation they require in situations where introverts would thrive.

Every day I check the news hoping to see ""cases in decline' headlines but nothing is there. I need help on how to spend my days, tough it out, and keep remembering this will end.",7.3305069124423925,8.519351981566825,7.747165898617514,67.12646313364057,63.74654377880185,11.914285714285715,35.31566820276497,11.629938488055165,4.654987096774193,968,43,159,31,14,318,130,217,0.168,0.6890000000000001,0.14400000000000002,-0.7966,1,3,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,1,6,12,10,1,1,6,0,14,2,1,3,1,39,30,14,0,5,5,0,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,12,12,0,2,9,1,2,1,7,5,1,3,5,5,14,5,28,22,2,35,0,2,1,0,8,16,1,2,15,103,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678798001422012,0.14218858584126426,0.0,0.0,0.17903552390778438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349211651612268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263990486316421,0.0,0.20157331520114724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20728483789148328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859195447531392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17750208666617834,0.0,0.11235476766529788,0.0,0.0,0.09953468630879438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358926536313038,0.0,0.0,0.11586532736494905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15686819233416674,0.0,0.0,0.11622438458180788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161214166800861,0.10401017595516446,0.0,0.0,0.19292861529836308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345637533393201,0.10332824401118157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178824184061577,0.11792571506416473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860210333748177,0.2603000929578945,0.0,0.2260316905974453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22456212870310646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929381604518262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08112492398709181,0.1021748190089882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120700362170916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170487674616554,0.0,0.22489245383085213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13255756428103038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932474792197593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011637256710378,0.0,0.13153212431716227,0.0,0.11928419813021594,0.0,0.09008548126675146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472466001572745,0.0,0.0,0.1340426938042142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823361260352595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143087044001129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19310272664864905,0.0,0.09288272805406944,0.09386406003722864,0.0,0.10521242696293877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312559114605206,0.0,0.14218858584126426,0.07535517646978028
mentalhealth,pleasesavemeahah,2020/03/25,"I cut again after 2 months I regret it now. I had a breakdown. I cut 6 times then failure and retarded in my leg I'm panicking because my stomach hurts so I'm worried it might be infected can somebody tell me how to know.

I hate myself for cutting I don't know what to do. 

Please help me",-0.892813620071685,1.2424372096774228,1.9418279569892505,93.41051971326168,96.258064516129,4.691039426523298,23.017921146953405,6.42735559955562,0.7206931899641584,225,10,49,3,9,78,47,62,0.424,0.508,0.069,-0.9747,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,4,0,1,0,6,3,2,1,0,6,11,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,11,0,5,8,0,7,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,1,6,32,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004050324883226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32457593865671946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22035648654052345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35193733385572784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613485622350816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487554244689169,0.0,0.0,0.26240784209018586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.360872530623573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28734497809025866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19169876204413036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33386505447353115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwRA89999,2020/03/25,I need to talk to a therapist but can't afford one. I live in Australia what are my options? Basically the title does anyone know what the options are for a psychologists/psychiatrist/therapist for someone with very little money to spend on it.,4.9190000000000005,7.440559955555559,6.3663888888888875,69.45625000000003,71.66666666666667,8.944444444444445,31.25,9.516144504307137,3.4973333333333336,198,9,31,5,4,67,35,45,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,8,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,0,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20366283979372907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548924442486078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16007444020468395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919291789610937,0.25719685167247264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159731028029396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19737217097882973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24679222688964794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23411188879061615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6763741163379947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403283527107464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pie53,2020/03/25,"My girl friend has insecurity problems and I want to give her the right advice and tools to help her. 


Ok so where do I start, um soo I’m dating a girl we have been dating for like an year and couple months. We also had this issue in our relationship. She is very insecure about her body imagine and anything having to do with her appearance. She finds herself very ugly compared to people online, people we go to school with, etc.... 

I just haven’t found how to get her to see her worth and it does suck and does take a toll on any improvement on her side. She isn’t close to being ugly or anything. However she doesn’t see it.

It also gotten to the point where she feel insecure about the things she likes such as Kpop and being that quirky girl I know. When we are alone she is super quirky like singing out loud and being herself but once out in the world she holds back such as telling people her favorite band and being herself. I see like more of a serious person, she holds back a lot of happiness you can kinda see the strain. She had said that’s she doesn’t even try to think about holding back but it’s in her back of head constantly worrying about people’s thoughts on her or giving her validation. 

She has mentioned that she feel insecure about the people I’ve dated before I got with her. She feels that she isn’t as pretty as them. 

This has a lot contributed to her depression and she constantly feels this deep sadness when it comes to life or any events we have to attend together or even by herself. She no longer feel happy with her appearance and she constantly says she hates how she looks and how she hates herself for looking “ugly” 

I don’t how to help or anything. I just really want her to feel comfortable in her skin.

Any tips or suggestions she should are all welcomed.",4.063679707876894,5.567677594366199,4.5287636932707365,86.0118831507564,71.64788732394365,7.738132498695879,24.69744392279604,8.285830014693849,1.3952576943140331,1426,41,285,22,27,451,164,355,0.124,0.735,0.141,0.6076,1,1,0,0,0,0,25.0,6,1,1,1,26,23,3,5,12,1,27,4,3,4,1,64,61,33,0,4,10,0,7,4,1,1,1,3,0,4,13,25,0,3,12,2,1,5,7,12,1,0,8,16,60,11,43,48,5,38,0,2,6,0,68,17,1,11,20,202,73,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680352817924614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200096336313072,0.0,0.14207444182888038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812220883450052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21929826106985187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732187705141885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558768309206013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866996859986132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651907390016607,0.0,0.2879806204387255,0.0,0.0,0.0982885698424088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650904329586576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15547124876508248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990687944897784,0.11734259258060928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694903305092214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118889871298414,0.0,0.0,0.09739737565886912,0.06862974297648394,0.0,0.04640994465684268,0.170427425458807,0.05048406644799998,0.0,0.07104536777152991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891221126901231,0.0,0.1754022269783119,0.09116508169811484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908158882104508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271531334548956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04881857755210739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274316946424804,0.17359116463352864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14918944938652026,0.0,0.0,0.15103997046646667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090316070513031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09460092040535603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30791726154369964,0.07756282267328046,0.0,0.0,0.08397294655708362,0.0,0.0,0.09037192029807804,0.0,0.08499819599584951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056906694122312175,0.0,0.0,0.09537004474249364,0.0,0.07586022999587014,0.08449755530531973,0.07064108392941781,0.0,0.08990057839417412,0.28314364598253344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287424447373904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678901283811646,0.0,0.07764122823868816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059014623473671875,0.05691859868554909,0.0,0.0705210003126485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06030965585161454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146587903849955,0.10478832646181364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021105246933933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057203528684745375
mentalhealth,Livemi,2020/03/25,"The person in my head Hi, my name's Olivia except it's not just me. For as long as I can remember, someone else has been with me but not exactly in the traditional sense. His name is Emi, and he's been in my head for as long as I can remember but I don't understand why. Despite being in my head, he's always acted as a sort of protector. My early childhood wasn't great and dangerous situations were a constant but he was there to protect me. He's his own person, with a name, and personality but he's never tried to be the ""host"" per say. He helps sort things out for me and calms me when a situation becomes too much for me to handle and we communicate just by speaking. What could this be? Have I just lost it?",1.4986097794822584,3.3995657114093976,3.8452780441035483,86.44994966442955,79.80536912751677,7.210162991371044,22.72339405560882,8.192908349453996,1.2224051773729618,557,18,122,11,14,193,84,149,0.05,0.8590000000000001,0.091,0.7227,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,0,1,6,4,1,0,7,0,15,3,3,0,2,30,17,15,0,1,10,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,5,9,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,6,2,18,2,22,7,2,13,0,1,0,0,19,5,0,2,7,87,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806060458468185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997507227634298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16631574028439886,0.0,0.12287996233904985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856719164620922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16967989888817975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4738502620367192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315872593531952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27240070779414616,0.0,0.0,0.16800459007695673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313727881408145,0.0,0.11870038948511324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4031495739755535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34868686228474977,0.0,0.0,0.12239077911195714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3459894874091484,0.0,0.0,0.13040251005403086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224709679084654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449083390379882,0.0,0.0,0.16021967637232098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887458181974446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tryingtobehapppy,2020/03/25,"Need help finding online therapy I am struggling with depression, anxiety, and PTSD. I managed to get myself together by socializing, going to workshops, attending therapy sessions. Those precious opportunities are no longer available these days. I feel depressed, frustrated, claustrophobic these days. I am in college now and having upcoming exams for the quarter but I can't concentrate on them as I need time to adapt to online classes. I need someone to talk to. I am 19 and I live by myself. My relationship with my family is not so great and they don't understand my depression. I appreciate any online therapy recommendations from you.",6.0806922435362765,9.371876201834867,7.219499582985822,60.95158465387826,71.38532110091742,10.936113427856547,37.43202668890742,10.637119530657019,5.624460550458716,522,30,70,19,11,175,75,109,0.191,0.727,0.08199999999999999,-0.9146,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,2,1,2,8,1,1,1,0,8,0,0,0,0,14,15,7,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,5,0,1,0,1,18,3,15,15,0,8,0,3,0,0,7,2,0,0,4,55,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950469749072747,0.0,0.12318613179472823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076997341771749,0.0,0.4160800565834942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180305526056234,0.0,0.08142069597748848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471768569885098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413058799764735,0.0,0.09151603662074877,0.0,0.0,0.17753415832849193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793380773544488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14219085025199085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35820110844378644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188233347917115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288402304450792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16414797053869334,0.13643867080343844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834163699332955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12942836704559887,0.0,0.0,0.5524493393146025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389683803017497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16763603454978765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Erwin2002,2020/03/25,"Cope with parental issues(sort of..) Hello guys  


I wanted to ask if anyone can give some advice how to heal from my father's death when i was 13 and my mom who diagnosed with NPD (i live with her). Dough I'm 17 now after my narcissistic gf dumped me 5 months ago i realized I'm still not healed from the death of my dad and i still burst into tears when i think about him. Also i feel like I have no confidence no self-esteem. None of that and i found that I'm somehow ashamed to be happy(even when I am I'm afraid to show it and force myself into sadness just not to smile...) 

So how can i start healing from these events?   


Thanks in advance!  
Erwin Nagy",0.8284444444444432,3.080936437037039,2.1674074074074063,95.55333333333336,84.62962962962962,5.0814814814814815,17.88888888888889,6.42735559955562,-0.2377555555555557,509,12,113,5,15,163,92,135,0.166,0.7709999999999999,0.063,-0.9245,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,13,6,1,2,1,0,6,4,0,2,0,22,18,12,2,2,4,4,1,1,1,0,4,0,0,1,5,9,0,0,4,1,0,1,5,4,0,0,2,1,19,2,19,15,2,15,0,1,0,0,12,3,0,3,12,73,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236828119891129,0.2029100132746688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18305483271626852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16005533712451533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21399479219443887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323332323030388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511892524709556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157409846438909,0.16352940871593769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25098195113392485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21958603853043268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266514269298649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183116820295458,0.0,0.20212685261334107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680901644711504,0.1827093748158436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541713398550444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23879729845409134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620197715527815,0.0,0.365606832346716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107444940760547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14667275023859538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13501379505110808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cemeteryhipster,2020/03/25,"I was cutting trees and got triggered I was cutting branches of trees earlier. At one point, I had to use rope to act as a pulley that I hung on the upper branch so I could remove the lower one. It was unsuccessful, but while pulling it hard, I used my entire body weight as if I could already swing. I realized it was able to support my body. I stopped immediately. I felt anxious and scared. Is this normal?",2.181759259259259,4.433445740740744,3.655046296296295,86.89145833333335,79.24691358024691,6.025308641975308,26.174382716049386,7.1686216300943375,1.2713567901234568,319,13,64,4,8,105,56,81,0.2,0.7559999999999999,0.044000000000000004,-0.8225,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,2,1,3,0,8,3,2,3,0,13,13,8,0,4,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,3,0,2,7,3,12,1,8,4,0,9,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,2,44,17,0,0.2020748440992297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229946153728183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282870555145561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4489191945631374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32268064006703623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940235399025276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16161771271447387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810193687685008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979904426653709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273862288199417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19102604403561324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20231217118490485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16894361797950685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293121383885625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34905556905877955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460727208329039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Obxlis,2020/03/25,"I don’t know what’s wrong w/ me So I’ve been experiencing a lot of really weird feelings of anxiety lately, and I have no idea why. It started after I smoked super strong weed and had a really really bad panic attack. I’m talking hospital and everything. And for a while after that every time I vaped or smoked tobacco the same feeling would come back, and I’d disassociate for a few days. Now it’s getting to the point where something as small as a caffeine buzz makes me extremely anxious. I start shaking, and my stomach hurts. Like a stinging aching sort of pain. I’m getting frustrated because I can’t feel anything out of the ordinary in my body w/o panicking. Do I just have bad anxiety? Or is something else going on? Please help.",2.335208333333334,4.961944326388891,4.226944444444449,80.78750000000005,81.43055555555556,7.488888888888887,27.055555555555557,8.472884824447931,2.4230638888888896,589,26,107,14,16,199,100,144,0.284,0.617,0.099,-0.9824,0,0,5,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,5,13,2,2,9,0,9,3,2,1,0,21,22,12,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,5,0,0,3,3,10,0,0,2,4,11,3,14,19,3,19,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,4,11,65,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24285560233116285,0.17931940272737726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062103472625114,0.0,0.0,0.1805779712105031,0.0,0.12205335670615484,0.2650653717347212,0.09676016389888988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763129356162382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13673159869631415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236753787283638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259831311929646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373663486717616,0.0,0.14265603718241954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24077554683815866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585945450978046,0.0,0.09020975767600097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639318528633736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16992344794536446,0.17918653297816114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723370284758701,0.0,0.17905403768622646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754732333426059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494633152427135,0.0,0.0,0.1059533205063343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688996131180302,0.18623512592737254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17423756667277665,0.15005089116695744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050589689840326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443957862306496,0.0,0.0,0.2246994252683598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275809361802807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255657607143754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322888326843822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275703875006622,0.1735460307651806,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Honokaonoka,2020/03/25,"Nightmares making my depression worse I (F21) have been dealing with depression for a while but I was too afraid to go to the doctor until a few weeks ago. I now take medication to battle my depression and have been for a few weeks. I don't know if it's the medication or my inner problems causing them but I have nightmares almost every night and wake up either screaming or on the verge of tears and quite frankly it's exhausting. Being depressed, I don't want to get out of bed or have the energy to do anything but be in bed. However, staying asleep or falling asleep isn't easy. So the fact that I can sleep at all should be a blessing but having nightmare after nightmare which make me feel worthless and sad is making my depression worse. Most of my nightmares are about my family members (mostly my grandmother who I used to live with for 20ish years until my mother and I moved out a few months ago) verbally and physically abusing me which she used to and still continues to do. I finally moved away from her and thought I was going to get better but she is still haunting me and making my depression worse. I don't know what to do because dreams aren't anything that anyone can control but I want to just go to sleep peacefully and wake up feeling slightly better.  I'm tired of life and I'm tired of falling asleep knowing that even in my dreams I'm not a person worth of anything.",5.8189722042663234,6.350002791208794,6.10371040723982,79.90452488687787,66.87545787545788,8.914371902607197,31.80973928032752,8.841846274778883,2.554467528549882,1114,43,209,17,17,357,136,273,0.261,0.652,0.087,-0.9949,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,4,8,16,1,1,11,0,26,14,7,8,2,52,49,26,0,5,14,1,2,0,0,1,7,1,2,1,9,15,0,1,6,2,1,7,6,13,0,0,5,3,30,3,37,40,7,35,1,8,0,0,8,11,0,8,16,151,39,1,0.0,0.11255277690511303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16841352788584718,0.0,0.09512312447591086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642226163972004,0.0,0.2345167799932878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925032340429563,0.0,0.0,0.057907677010692035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680295744605043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975853698300564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654424649795613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793500866198317,0.4909109918130625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723074744420412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274287546517147,0.0,0.0800368410338559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955222347127999,0.0,0.09606400014608224,0.0,0.0,0.10406167245053503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926125932318856,0.0,0.16196244302066318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15661923932528735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670973221472183,0.0,0.0,0.08388175570960127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536378780218884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913936371962788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582358774207222,0.20192793129250666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914576693242579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294540655173831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089676832337347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103818946898978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19012591727351885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125134286875304,0.15172522898446494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142393265369458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541490677830817,0.0,0.21836407333136967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16408924493923469,0.0,0.0,0.11206026341851542,0.0,0.1523974829786547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904220895600681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117325001098432
mentalhealth,salmoncatman,2020/03/25,"Attention Deficiency & Nicotine Addiction Throughout high school, college, and my career so far I have struggled with a presumptive attention deficit disorder. I have always been afraid to get a formal diagnosis. My method of combatance for awhile was nicotine in the form of gum, which is known to increase focus, memory, and cognitive function. I hate the dependency, waking up feeling like garbage, and the rage/depression that washes over me when I run out.

I have never been able to listen to people speak to completion. I have never been able to learn anything in a class in college or high school. I can stay ""hyper-focused"" only when there is an anxiety inducing deadline in front of me. Even then I need to pound the caffeine and nicotine, put on my noise cancelling headphones, turn phones off, and tune out the entire world. I have taught myself nearly everything I know in an anxiety induced state. I just can't focus, it's amazing to me I've come this far.

With the current ""quarantine"" situation, I can't really bear to do much work. I sit and stare at the same page of text, reading it over and over, and nothing seems to be processed. I don't want to revert back to old ways. I want to try some sort of medication, but I don't know how to get it prescribed to me. I'm also afraid of developing new dependencies.

​

Could anybody shed light on similar experiences?",5.65551398026316,7.4060588359375,6.120205592105265,75.18186677631581,68.0625,9.295723684210527,33.004934210526315,9.682069395223575,3.3992453125,1106,50,188,25,19,357,159,256,0.069,0.9109999999999999,0.02,-0.7643,1,1,1,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,0,1,9,6,1,3,12,0,19,4,1,5,2,38,34,16,0,4,3,0,1,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,13,0,0,10,1,0,5,6,4,0,0,5,5,24,2,40,27,6,39,0,0,1,0,3,21,0,6,10,127,30,10,0.26539196895083805,0.0,0.0,0.14465820974115984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611693084325388,0.11041368913723183,0.2875520874786396,0.16124014543691592,0.0,0.0,0.20302412983762827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091974887926432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203502122729922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430584092012472,0.1391292150757227,0.0,0.0,0.10594694603309343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429085698734764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208109444978551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08764444626037889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11925859456003432,0.12980213518005765,0.0,0.0,0.06709507681899261,0.09479803782315074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386563501272416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310098125349568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804011862267542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14585248553578867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482855528161402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336772440333825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754681678509393,0.09839239110380914,0.20468664735080205,0.1281586086873765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273253759346566,0.0,0.1392421138397404,0.0,0.0,0.1009212757036251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199468765263814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13339611527463746,0.0,0.0,0.13273189389335627,0.0,0.0850084455298288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268590841179257,0.0,0.12080144055378475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491558462941752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14143626368825954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13872265436081846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09009186306562393,0.1443351264980903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15653505935601986,0.10532789598691816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660425709965256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16124014543691592,0.0
mentalhealth,ihaveaverybigpeepee,2020/03/25,"Whats wrong with me? This is only one aspect of what doesn't ""feel"" right:
I feel so apathetic.

I just don't feel happy for other people, never. For as long as I can remember. I don't get any emotion, my reaction is so artificial. I uses to be able to fake it whenni was younger, but now I just can't. I can't fake anything anymore

I don't know how to phrase it right, but I'm loosing my ""love"" for other people. I used to be able to look at my mom, my brother, my best friends, and feel happy when I saw them. Now I just look at them, see them, and feel nothing. I know I should feel, but I can't. The last time I felt any emotion for how much I loved somone, was about a year and a half ago. 

I can't fall in love with people anymore. I just feel no such emotion towards people.

I feel like I unconsciously look at people as ""tools"". I only feel like I like somone when they do somthing for me (but not love). And that feeling is only for a short burst of time. I just never give, I'm always taking, taking. I know I'm doing it, I lothe myself for it, but I do it anyway. God, I hate it so much. I dont want to be the person that just uses people for self gain.

I only feel sad when I'm feeling self pity, or guilt. Never for anyone else. 

I have lost all enthusism for things I know I should be excited for. My friend is going to take me to another country for a month and a half. Who wouldn't be excited for that? I know I should be, I want to be, but I don't feel a fucking thing.

I'm the asshole friend, who makes people the butt of the joke. I can say, I can laugh at myself, but I laugh at others way too much.

It feels like all I can feel is anger, self pity, guilt, and humor. I feel like a stale peice of bread, gross and bland. An over self indulgent stale peice of bread.

I've felt this way off and on for quite some time. Maybe my whole life, its hard saying. But for a year and a half, its all ive felt. And its gotten worse in this year and a half time frame. 

I want to look at my mother, and feel love. I want to do somthing out of the kindness of my heart and feel it, not because I'll get somthing out of it, but because I care. I want to care that my friend is getting good grades. 
I don't want my mind to have to tell and want me to feel somthing as a substitute, I want to actually feel it. 
I want to feel.

(I'm 16 Female for anyone that cares)",0.843229665071771,2.1893964307992206,2.7812169945064693,95.88874202551834,79.81871345029239,5.599308878256247,18.87156654261917,6.1124844417494595,-0.34856296296296296,1791,37,441,12,44,601,184,513,0.14800000000000002,0.6829999999999999,0.16899999999999998,0.9713,0,0,0,0,0,0,83.0,0,0,4,4,20,42,3,2,18,0,41,11,2,6,6,93,115,36,0,13,18,3,25,5,4,4,1,2,0,5,30,18,2,0,30,1,0,2,18,13,0,5,8,33,70,29,62,96,9,40,0,4,6,7,27,17,2,2,24,283,100,1,0.10303799816991392,0.0,0.05027511140195469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04566848421028488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042867934339652185,0.0,0.0,0.07006937207905363,0.05402216256485826,0.0,0.0,0.10218600704851888,0.0720465640731912,0.0527873027961785,0.0423957465437088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06281100732025706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054066011070006206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15758115938523776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037988323408571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04303751296190922,0.17385581910862566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5470406321115582,0.14722073296110402,0.14839895513847184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921380357853965,0.047628484487951386,0.08074965196085608,0.0494217183843533,0.029279434435780856,0.04321169213010614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968586503566398,0.046150903817420916,0.05086434558507018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06105026196998325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05364910958980654,0.1415674727943433,0.04199486040345003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03638939265151684,0.1258479031387437,0.0,0.0,0.04559269298183148,0.1730519353595344,0.0,0.0562390733632429,0.0,0.23248954055095936,0.0,0.03438933194079294,0.0,0.051757759204966766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05201950266005613,0.060338429067619874,0.041121973549690966,0.0,0.11361717653835993,0.0,0.11920388441960325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04943386909710524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034910607102142915,0.15673008135648278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500175098299665,0.04498440282055333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479679712579783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058360982934598626,0.08799388744704936,0.0,0.08193995178713748,0.0,0.0,0.0410539720834135,0.0,0.21498220768724965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620762708002673,0.0,0.04502987599205626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845386753975022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016457068501706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348762155254545,0.0,0.0,0.27348516424392355,0.0817867669232399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05751912262882908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052502261458797744,0.0,0.05632793791143205,0.0,0.09952963888193274
mentalhealth,Stephythinks,2020/03/25,"Great video for any parent of kids & teenagers to watch, or really anyone to know the signs of depression and potential suicide Also what he shared about resilience is so true. We're all going to suffer, but being open and knowing that in the end we will be okay is key. 
[youtube video ](https://youtu.be/PW7Cx3iYYLk)",5.785535714285714,8.541790767857144,4.370857142857143,83.67414285714288,69.89285714285714,7.337142857142857,25.485714285714288,8.238735603445708,1.7217471428571427,257,8,43,4,5,74,48,56,0.114,0.747,0.139,0.1426,1,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,0,2,11,8,6,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,4,8,5,1,4,0,2,1,0,5,2,0,1,1,25,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544490453445937,0.0,0.3447487293703443,0.0,0.21637383323445286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224793911710839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740486293841475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818137195371825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18082946302584615,0.0,0.0,0.3507954201767538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34972765807311224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3533020888900281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038347475695762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3480381175421804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Listens_2_Everything,2020/03/25,:) :) :) I dont think I'm doing okay,-7.144166666666665,-10.726443749999998,-1.2749999999999986,108.95333333333332,174.0,1.0666666666666669,2.6666666666666665,3.1291,-3.2903833333333337,22,0,7,0,3,9,7,8,0.0,0.268,0.732,0.872,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8774259114880599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4797121739640837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Drumsticks_Is_Life,2020/03/25,:) :) :) I dont think I'm doing okay.,-7.144166666666665,-10.726443749999998,-1.2749999999999986,108.95333333333332,174.0,1.0666666666666669,2.6666666666666665,3.1291,-3.2903833333333337,22,0,7,0,3,9,7,8,0.0,0.268,0.732,0.872,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8774259114880599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4797121739640837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,finnsatch,2020/03/25,"I can't watch my favorite TV Show without feeling lonely I used to love a TV Show called ""The Flash"". A girl in my friend group and I would text and talk about it all the time too, it was amazing. I had watched the show for years before I meet her, and I finally had someone to talk to about it. I eventually developed feelings for her. I told her, and she rejected me. We continued to talk, and text. A couple of months after her rejecting me, but me keeping hope (when she rejected me, she said it in a way that gave me hope like ""I don't know if I like you or not"") and us continuing to geek out and talk, some friend drama happened, and I took one side and she took the other, and she left our friend group, she promised to keep in contact but didn't. I would text, her and she would occasionally text me back, and finally, she stopped. I started to get really depressed whenever I started to think of ""The Flash"" I think that it is because it reminds me that I used to have someone to talk to about it, but I don't anymore. I just really want to be able to geek out over it with someone, but I can't. I also just really want to date someone. I am 15. What can I do to deal with these feelings of loneliness and depression? I am seeing a therapist, and I started to rewatch ""The Flash"". Confronting the trigger seemed to help, but I still just want to be able to date someone and be able to talk to them about my geekiness and be appreciated. Thanks!",3.8589661016949135,4.5566442101694955,5.002500000000001,85.46849576271188,71.3050847457627,8.476271186440679,29.326271186440678,8.697196308434329,2.0233355932203385,1122,43,244,19,20,371,130,295,0.106,0.7290000000000001,0.165,0.9623,0,4,0,0,0,0,43.0,3,1,1,0,12,20,1,0,12,0,21,1,0,3,1,56,50,25,0,9,12,0,3,2,3,3,0,1,0,1,14,21,0,3,7,6,0,2,7,9,0,1,9,7,53,11,40,34,2,28,0,6,3,1,39,8,0,6,19,175,67,0,0.27243728200614226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262266533047766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006152588954243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982915110430196,0.0,0.05535841281317158,0.0,0.07727468701108811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272964174748703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048222356662537,0.0,0.0,0.09362362502247452,0.15643322119042025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775247560671855,0.0,0.0,0.1989611505390594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104843682680476,0.0,0.04744574513802172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030512958003026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060869655799093675,0.0,0.0,0.18039446186479094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614365159893562,0.0,0.0,0.04990813511337662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866796801346744,0.0,0.0,0.08873272976636087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196176122406394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248561309800687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615368510065461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745302990084366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863834142325572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723657470616959,0.08267222316988844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3847253749190135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928325104309425,0.0,0.07252292177722966,0.0759232555636982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379495350714205,0.0,0.08360788205601946,0.0,0.10544022750360242,0.0,0.11637787318282147,0.0,0.0,0.05295345667345591,0.0,0.0,0.08677516600003317,0.20179189638429554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092361686452019,0.15686555960223664,0.0,0.0,0.16069056753380526,0.07208267784826909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753993930228038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935316285296794,0.0,0.0,0.05848022580160054
mentalhealth,INeeDYouislit,2020/03/25,"Does this belong here? Idrk plz tell me if it doesn’t I’ve been having problems with escaping(?) my thoughts. I’ll look up symptoms on google( ik I shouldn’t) and all of a sudden I can never stop thinking about me having a deadly disease or something. Sometimes I’m able to forget, but most of the time I get rly scared to the point where I’m nauseous and can’t breathe. This happened to me a lot when I was younger and started again recently. Not just like being afraid of illness’s either, but really anything that catches my attention,  I find myself over analyzing and freaking out about what could happen. This might happen to everybody and not be anything special, but I needed to talk about it somewhere and any tips on how to deal with it better would be helpful!",4.751720561317878,6.244621731543628,4.977291031116536,83.50381330079318,69.93959731543625,7.028920073215375,30.323978035387434,7.348242739294969,1.8871825503355697,614,25,112,6,11,193,103,149,0.114,0.818,0.068,-0.7851,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,9,7,0,2,5,0,14,3,1,1,2,35,25,13,1,6,9,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,8,9,0,1,4,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,3,1,12,3,19,15,4,16,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,5,9,82,20,0,0.17875643690187906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156050691269073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.294202633069453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809554195195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272246932249638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842900372770328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15643096255120512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633801448824128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09339286038137982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4742211804003988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981667163135702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733136573386291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15011038603852228,0.0,0.0,0.1519723302633012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896323309074099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254563294815572,0.13786798412350856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16898261205882492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17104576853097198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451595079951025,0.0,0.17650041610337336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17896637765133105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13761543837641568,0.17679468688621455,0.0,0.12652472609348145,0.0,0.0,0.14944838543336522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18579638255830372,0.0,0.1436776528082464,0.15624100486113252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453990689815476,0.0,0.14191264361232894,0.1042343158786718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698344400236514,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elianatii,2020/03/25,"Why are my feelings hurt so easily? My feelings have always been hurt so easily. What made me make this reddit post is pretty pathetic. I was playing a game online and someone blamed me for losing the game. A few seconds later, I begin crying. I cried for a few minutes and I tried stopping but I just couldnt. I was even asking myself, ""why am I crying over this?"" but I was unable to stop crying. Something this stupid made me cry as if someone close to me died or something. I just don't understand why I'm so sensitive. It's like I'm being forced to cry but I dont know what's forcing me... Answers are greatly appreciated!",1.42404761904762,3.8244731507936542,3.559682539682541,85.5714285714286,83.36507936507937,5.504761904761906,22.492063492063494,6.868970318607317,0.8875777777777779,491,17,93,6,14,167,76,126,0.33,0.562,0.10800000000000001,-0.9863,0,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,1,0,4,0,13,0,0,3,0,21,24,11,1,2,7,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,2,5,3,0,0,3,4,0,1,6,2,18,3,7,16,2,7,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,2,5,64,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933828857676317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491825433131788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7396647082392809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647519415534675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153066098396274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412569380892517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349194005049693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373203036426655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402853033121972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06167770546451635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05482904900332845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12555469324533014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123861477578596,0.07491322140245422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748363079016153,0.11417646645804387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190181246444695,0.17279756364623775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876556671142729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619560783621505,0.0,0.0,0.11683355536955699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038055907707013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,King11022,2020/03/25,I don’t know what is going on Hi I’m new to this subreddit but I am really confused and looking for answers. This all started about a month ago when I was completing an IP for my class that I fail. My mother every 2-3 days would call my teacher or tell me to get a note from him to check my progress. She began to get on my case more which wasn’t a new thing because she would do this randomly every year at school and at points harass teachers for not constantly updating her on what seems to be my every move. At some moments it got to the point where she would lie about my teachers emailing and calling to try to get me to confess to doing wrong. Sorry back to the point. So one day I was in class and this day was especially bad because she didn’t want a note but for me to call her with my teacher. She wanted a “plan” for how I will make up my grade but when I told her my original plan about how the IP was the plan I got a beating. That day the time hit 2:09 I remember the next 25 minutes vividly. 2:09 my ears start to get warm which only continued from then on 2:15 my ears are burning to the point I am starting to get worried as the area around my ears are heating up to. 2:20 my whole head is burning and I feel like my heart is going to beat out of my chest. 2:23 I start silently crying and get out of the class to get water. 2:25 the clock seems to slow down taking almost twice as long to go by. 2:27 my breathing starts to quicken and I feel like I am loosing air and can barely breath 2:30 I get back to class and ask the teacher to call my mom and he does after I explain the situation. He then says that he will be there in the mornings and that that will be what he tells my mom and he will have it open if I need. I was able to catch my bus and calm down but I still get a more minor version of that whenever my mom needs anything from my teachers. I don’t know what is going on and I really need some help. If anyone knows anything please PM me.,1.678179527976667,3.2399328926014332,3.0584745425616537,93.8649645319544,78.06921241050121,5.896605674887298,22.3787456907982,6.56203326957186,0.3172274728188813,1538,45,352,13,36,501,197,419,0.08,0.858,0.063,-0.8856,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,7,14,9,1,1,21,0,32,9,8,4,1,56,73,30,0,10,8,4,3,2,0,7,0,4,0,0,19,19,1,0,11,0,1,6,5,5,0,2,11,9,56,4,60,51,7,64,1,1,2,0,32,25,0,10,35,230,75,7,0.07733194016851164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855009901711329,0.0,0.07743676750315087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0540722906229916,0.0,0.127275195300709,0.06884182207338058,0.07229492501298203,0.0,0.0,0.11892697714758638,0.06456893988340844,0.0942816659152128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31585822856517176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108106796495282,0.08356835464710623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494550504694866,0.19949081558759912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676737019722131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19546648467360486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820270502803613,0.11049190701607396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636247228192988,0.0,0.17579809485210274,0.0,0.12369883391987273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936488087817169,0.0,0.0,0.09163872143846116,0.05183396940761526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274988357349843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07556095955831288,0.0,0.0,0.06843633355489243,0.06493935319473335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05161967055483813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717107010653249,0.061725616852761435,0.08219161404780136,0.0,0.1720219612964864,0.0,0.14937533940113748,0.08224339568094552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05240212402452556,0.05881442520883756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488724795923384,0.29241471740511066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908164213889474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760201325013144,0.0,0.0,0.0614974626988033,0.0,0.07826405200577914,0.0,0.1408001878897217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692434083068701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656677575945625,0.27367972638292104,0.0,0.061757387312312825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05814399492802081,0.0,0.13518304850103252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05137590484005429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045092876199248406,0.0,0.0,0.07389398281850358,0.0,0.05250331117254837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122476382573984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633834951534773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853433902282853,0.0,0.16480317460186342,0.08455033680292122,0.0,0.049799234041269694
mentalhealth,banana_slippers,2020/03/25,"R/Bipolar permabanned me for a stupid mistake but I really need their support now. Help/Advice please! Hey, person with Bipolar 2 here, as with most other people my mental health has been spiraling lately. I was on a recovery path but since all my appointments, treatments and recreational activities have been canceled I feel that I'm headed back to feeling super depressed (already starting to feel it) so, I tried going on /r/Bipolar and it was really helping! However, I made a mistake and posted a progress picture of myself and next day got a message saying I was permabanned. I didn't know they had such a strict policy about personal information, I tried to appeal to them and they said no, and tried contact the reddit team and all I got was an auto reply saying that each sub makes their own rules.

I agree that each sub makes their own rules but moderator guidelines state that bans should not be in bad faith or be a punishment for a mistake 

Can I please get some help or advice on this? I am devastated that I can't use the sub for support and my mental health is declining by the day, I've been on reddit for 7 years and always try to be a positive member of the community, I feel like this could actually be dangerous for me as I dont think I have anywhere else to turn.

(Sorry for lack of sources/links but I dont have the energy right now)",6.112286121673003,6.52224827756654,6.793248574144489,75.63534814638784,66.22433460076046,9.92100760456274,31.646625475285173,9.827888789773867,3.0027796577946773,1079,40,198,22,16,356,151,263,0.127,0.696,0.177,0.9466,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,6,3,7,13,3,0,15,0,25,4,1,4,2,43,46,18,0,7,7,0,4,1,0,1,3,3,0,2,10,13,0,1,7,1,0,1,6,8,0,0,13,7,29,5,26,27,9,18,1,1,0,0,18,6,0,4,10,137,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.11077625877810043,0.0,0.0,0.22185508092582984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526887955013152,0.0,0.09445527330064353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728759895236242,0.09478198915840416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063412173907603,0.0,0.0,0.1464182031977548,0.0,0.09777206265689793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266082257547042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948289231010823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22959051065448366,0.08109659808415068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05930796963889341,0.0,0.06451435144524373,0.0,0.18157989827107732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650123561786778,0.24132661647785986,0.0,0.0,0.22826424293015515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062385998015782186,0.0,0.12805216877389153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05545869316258449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741257065913573,0.15154701513525276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22879695937148306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417144889401433,0.0,0.0,0.12072666287935704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786984243741493,0.19823740649669372,0.0,0.2492152490125148,0.0,0.0,0.10871794802842967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14544384882209815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969429343357596,0.1079807028787254,0.18054661740807404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939024708870798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12707303567824452,0.08034794718866534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576355899460109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727371374323151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082824825262786,0.12347394536664302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980422777555031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310125378424122
mentalhealth,Aayytt,2020/03/25,"Suggestions All I want right now are suggestions for how I can mitigate my problems until I can get professional help. I have extremely rapid mood swings, going from feeling numb to pure rage and ready to hurt someone, or from being really depressed to being excited and euphoric. I haven’t observed anything external that seems to cause it, these swings seem to just happen out of nowhere. It is because of these swings that I feel anxious and paranoid so often. My anxiety makes me really sick and have severe pains in my chest. My paranoia often leads me to believing that imaginary people are out to hurt me in some way. It also affects how much I trust real people. When I have this paranoia, I often have thoughts that don’t seem to come directly from me, as if another entity exists within my body, the thoughts are mostly just negative statements, either about myself or about what may happen to me in terms of who or what is after me. I dissociate often as well, sometimes it gets bad enough to where I actually cannot make the distinction between what’s reality and what isn’t.

I’ve been holding off on posting this simply due to fear, but I was just had another psychotic episode. I started to hallucinate things watching me, wanting to hurt me, and I can’t take anymore of it.",9.713051678611848,8.05158605394191,9.405997736703132,66.64872500943044,59.829875518672196,12.581063749528479,40.99622783855149,11.389717465364855,4.749569294605809,1033,46,174,23,11,336,142,241,0.152,0.7909999999999999,0.057,-0.9603,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,17,14,1,1,2,0,22,5,2,7,3,48,41,19,0,4,9,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,19,9,0,1,8,0,0,3,6,10,1,0,5,3,28,3,36,33,7,22,0,4,1,0,4,10,0,14,7,140,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.12348392543998522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119328674994656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26537459622640863,0.09680207872843684,0.1429531851332913,0.12549280273597274,0.0,0.0,0.10413091207933764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565487778148057,0.07713707168875046,0.0,0.0,0.1425662535227123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405564336217484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12999053073678682,0.0,0.10900224540520906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898795670128496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307487346774373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423916874412273,0.12796396002223132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13222293263317594,0.0,0.07191509671428252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22379624785468247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848165032998758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4063882280973983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16893168738528833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302081132613194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346465429606118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17545258297860006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211894961647215,0.0,0.0,0.12108084620871945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14402921894163376,0.16212839810404386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806371516327892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3455893809769817,0.0,0.1429531851332913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072161838373672,0.0,0.12515042305482288,0.0,0.0895650388390121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514166856293103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406696712986789,0.0,0.0,0.2009158498789268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492721003327117,0.10044086176141366,0.0,0.0,0.11377386359728447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ayungbull,2020/03/25,"NPD or normal? I've noticed that my normal reaction to deep personal loss is swiftly followed by a swelling of the sense of self. Is this a normal reaction for people, or is it indicative of some underlying disorder such as NPD?",5.781550387596897,7.158519093023255,7.288372093023257,68.33782945736439,67.37209302325581,11.314728682170546,37.58914728682171,11.20814326018867,4.956417054263566,183,10,30,6,3,63,33,43,0.12,0.83,0.049,-0.4871,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,4,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,8,4,1,3,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,3,0,22,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109947084614973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7976066755573639,0.0,0.30893784618034503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18812240384017734,0.2369354770300224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830809610529764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JimboJimbopulous,2020/03/25,"I don't know what to do. I don't really do things like this but I don't know what to do anymore. My moms boyfriend is in a veteran motorcycle club and in this club there is an ""Ole Lady"" who hired my girlfriend on to work at her coffee shop. Obviously I was happy for her she had never really had an actual job before and she was in an environment where she could be comfortable and not have to worry about people making her too anxious. I was all for it until one day I was told I wasn't allowed to come up to the coffee shop or this specific persons house. I was confused and a little aggravated as I literally helped renovate the building she made into a coffee shop for FREE just because I liked them. Eventually I find out later from the actual building owner that I was allowed up there and that everything she had said was pretty much bullshit. So I go up there. She doesnt say anything to me until I say hi and I got an awkward hello back and that was it yet everyone else who was with me got hugs and kisses and all that. I've found out recently on 3 different occasions that she has been saying shady things to my girlfriend amongst the lines of ""You should get you a man in the club"" and other things that pretty much hint that I'm a shitty person. I have never done anything to her to deserve this treatment. I know that she's not cheating on me but I respected this ""Ole Lady"" and bent over backwards to help with anything and now shes trying to turn my own girlfriend against me. I don't know what to do because she works at the coffee shop more than she sees me and eventually I feel with the way they are changing my girlfriends views that she's going to push me away and I love this girl with all my heart I know this is all over the place but I have no one to talk to in my life and my support system is garbage and I've tried so hard in my life to get to the mental stability that I have now and it's slowly crumpling away by this situation. Will someone please give me some advice on what I can do because it's killing me inside. I'm so tired. I'm ready to just give up. Any advice is greatly appreciated.",3.946506849315071,4.738947440639271,5.2176986301369865,83.65846575342471,71.1689497716895,8.031780821917808,26.928767123287678,8.238735603445708,1.6124213698630143,1681,54,350,24,30,561,201,438,0.078,0.7659999999999999,0.155,0.9908,4,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,2,2,16,15,2,2,18,0,42,7,1,4,7,56,69,27,1,2,8,1,2,2,4,2,3,4,0,4,32,25,0,0,8,7,5,4,11,4,0,2,21,8,62,12,58,44,9,45,0,0,2,3,45,28,0,3,13,262,94,4,0.0,0.0,0.184346611260131,0.0,0.0,0.18459836435460167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423183825802803,0.0,0.0,0.1067059342107336,0.09367281141850396,0.0,0.0,0.2331823437850879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748495093260616,0.07262915921422357,0.0,0.17273452051775784,0.0,0.08037324609280336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991962007265802,0.08136360456876432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541369148693389,0.0,0.0,0.06091490154124842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986841410387684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665905408188352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890404864705543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902546751261998,0.08488900524330822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477586906746622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632908258763394,0.0,0.0,0.10356374110699243,0.0,0.0,0.0986964476345914,0.18121742653073114,0.10736056802928397,0.0,0.15108670074462693,0.10413567275501064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054785041050443,0.08461207233648227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192823443720994,0.1266208124381739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898702954939676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373084436507363,0.0,0.1044991600956501,0.0,0.25954675331941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334310563230423,0.09229073325104002,0.094667544052215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524826252762482,0.08937449064521745,0.06304865996317295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951872373015476,0.0,0.0,0.1106231753366442,0.0,0.0,0.1388688550638489,0.0,0.14569722160737508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800870921717522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548238767454291,0.16494686910245746,0.0986841410387684,0.10368193315192817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19218698848462534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101907464077095,0.0,0.09326175472243743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984721490303359,0.2253404122470529,0.0,0.0,0.07526746755305101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617005394745338,0.0,0.0,0.08003041728806996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718507844196357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591840467645278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18825276797067725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856077424251892,0.0,0.0902546751261998,0.0,0.12825589072839993,0.10273863577959656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497304783513244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752701543585827,0.09592244164407544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alittlerosy,2020/03/25,Don’t know what to do I’ve had depression for a while and it’s been getting especially bad the last month or two and of course everything going on now isn’t helping. The only person I can talk to is my mom and she just tells me I need to go to church again. I don’t have friends and even when I did I never felt comfortable talking to any of them about anything like this. I feel hopeless and useless and sad and angry and like something must be wrong with me and sometimes I just don’t see the point of any of it but I can’t say anything to anyone and I just don’t know what to do. I can’t talk to anyone.,2.147669172932332,3.1066845563909817,3.615045112781957,92.83324436090228,75.61654135338345,6.5230075187969945,23.82631578947369,6.742157984588678,0.5177073684210525,478,14,113,4,10,158,78,133,0.134,0.809,0.057,-0.8223,0,0,1,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,1,0,8,10,0,0,4,0,17,0,0,0,2,23,26,14,0,2,5,1,2,2,1,1,0,1,0,1,5,11,0,0,4,0,0,2,8,6,0,1,4,4,15,4,16,20,0,11,1,4,1,0,11,2,0,1,9,79,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375971770387192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443016075528193,0.0,0.2875181951358025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458630254956388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15046454494904182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538439794303533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700459892189206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833103948995959,0.0,0.1677345929717402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13496892134690108,0.0,0.09127092567212096,0.0,0.19856638530692405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709437408908002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920156033851299,0.14239973880082155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706943027163004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20460066913748065,0.1394398799327647,0.0,0.0,0.1295341267370294,0.1347355513057045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13286341729070925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15253693309649569,0.0,0.0,0.16514323859575092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13892447337295707,0.0,0.0,0.13920929478632166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448874353027504,0.1727778189909123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42123966382404904,0.15269112738794596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706516279113083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19100155515977987,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SinCeno,2020/03/25,"Online Pilates with a certified professional As everybody is aware this Corona virus is making everyday life rather difficult if not different.  I have a friend who is absolutely phenomenal at what she does.  Single mom and super passionate about life (genuine good people status).  She has a pilates business that's been heavily affected by this virus.  So she's doing video/online pilates.  Check her out if you're even remotely interested, she is amazing!

[Bodymax Pilates](http://www.bodymaxpilates.com)

[Bodymax Pilates Facebook](https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=867373600445919&id=251286735387945&refid=52&__tn__=%2As-R)

Thank you for your time in reading 🙂",13.374589371980688,18.373414043478263,9.174927536231886,47.48987922705314,55.30434782608696,11.045410628019324,38.48309178743961,10.746095033038511,5.838829468599032,580,26,57,16,9,162,73,92,0.068,0.733,0.198,0.9295,1,0,0,0,1,0,43.0,0,2,0,1,4,8,0,0,3,0,8,3,0,2,0,9,10,5,0,3,4,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,8,7,8,9,1,5,0,0,0,1,10,3,0,2,2,40,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7154508592386879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299628242374133,0.0,0.0,0.19261532369774872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537724262830598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17005253722098693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18461358799739566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109332688113868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692176226998482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577842554917856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525930574957458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22016451202992174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20264306455090011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12834496551034033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gscarlett,2020/03/25,"I need Help I keep crying out and begging for help and no one will. Everyone gaslights me and tells me my problems dont matter.

Get over the past.

Forgive and forget. 

That wanting justice is vindictive and makes me a bad person.

I'm psychologically fucked up from severe abused and being human trafficked from a young age.

There is no help.",2.143055555555556,5.027851500000004,3.0395833333333364,85.93597222222225,88.6875,4.719444444444443,22.73611111111111,6.42735559955562,0.7950715277777776,272,10,48,3,9,86,49,64,0.32299999999999995,0.515,0.163,-0.9076,0,0,0,0,1,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,3,0,5,1,0,1,0,15,12,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,6,1,6,10,0,6,0,0,0,1,7,3,1,0,3,31,7,0,0.0,0.2793671715187834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19687098027389227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589992166303298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763387608864697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253030769916525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179798250896738,0.12318815235402655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4741259986856153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20957691853450425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573886014219304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17483190426763812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977430547521398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22508386688213036,0.0,0.20587873756655425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256148072482201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663704154641433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060868532367681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907235206321364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,killahklock,2020/03/25,Covid 19 really fucked me up mentally The past week has felt like a month. All the changes and change of routine ie losing my job I love has triggered all my bouts of mental illness at once. I can't cope w change and messing up my riutine I got in just to start a new one. Can anyone relate,1.2579234972677575,3.2661197377049227,2.689754098360656,93.88632513661207,81.13114754098359,5.3781420765027335,21.642076502732237,6.42735559955562,0.2673256830601089,228,7,50,2,6,74,49,61,0.152,0.746,0.102,-0.5095,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,1,0,4,0,4,3,0,1,2,7,9,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,1,7,2,7,7,2,9,0,1,0,2,1,4,1,0,6,28,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723937009281315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6228957176123402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18845385515720792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18145218425576606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697827716180085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947716958916175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588958017049563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195804421666918,0.0,0.0,0.17714498121502406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3955961297915849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15666406356865809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895626877520848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20902544344494786,0.13300036691239167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18736577694607665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573817382466873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389237734271059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743919321179667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,it-b-like-tht,2020/03/25,"Sad my classes got moved online for the rest of the semester bc in my one class we were going to be talking about eating disorders and im in recovery from an ED and was really looking forward to it ik it sounds nerdy and stupid but like im really upset and ok just to provide context: earlier in the semester my professor showed a very triggering video and i actually went to office hours and talked to her about it and told her that i had an ED/am in recovery from an ED and explained to her some of the problems i had with the video and stuff but since i was super anxious and awkward, i feel like i kinda just word
vomited and kept repeating myself and like idk she was awesome and generally is an amazing professor but it made me feel weird afterwards that i told her and i was looking forward to the class where we talk about ED’s bc i almost wanted to like “redeem” myself from my awkwardness and just be confident and be able to express myself and my thoughts more clearly and also provide the class with more insight into ED’s bc the textbook does a terrible job (btw almost any ED section in any textbook ive ever read does a really shitty job at actually teaching people what ED’s are really about and in my opinion, i think textbook descriptions and paragraphs can sometimes even play into/reinforce stereotypes but that’s a whole other issue). so yeah idk basically im just ranting bc im sad that we wont be able to have that discussion and i hate how the textbook describes and talks about ED’s and i just wanna educate ppl and talk about them on a less superficial/stereotypical level and i also now feel this weird like unfinished/awkward end to the relationship with my professor and her knowing about my ED but me not really being able to have the rest of the semester to kinda have things seem normal again idk",5.420903165735567,6.424910117318442,6.477220670391063,75.19234869646186,67.9385474860335,9.765549348230913,32.235102420856606,9.928628108626363,3.291580633147113,1474,62,264,34,24,493,168,358,0.11900000000000001,0.7509999999999999,0.129,0.9012,3,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,3,0,1,1,21,20,2,3,21,2,20,2,0,3,2,71,39,35,0,4,11,0,3,5,0,1,1,1,0,0,14,33,1,1,9,5,0,5,2,11,0,1,14,6,37,9,40,19,8,24,0,2,2,0,21,14,0,7,14,186,51,15,0.2810410436364843,0.0,0.18283701195418467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876146726048636,0.0,0.0,0.1498322807058427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741169798722754,0.0,0.0,0.10583212805219468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736579475385688,0.0,0.16396060745897292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585838320452793,0.0,0.0,0.08297298242025004,0.0,0.0,0.061874986253562886,0.08473923795753308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14210279600113135,0.06692525924285336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053240700564002055,0.0,0.07492473206134281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924899488280167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225627219159148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4047634053501644,0.09777794426701518,0.18592658030985074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148426924145354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22883742998223314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15733579643940784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864261025899793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956738418746694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178685070006604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348022818915305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06494615776334747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963944111270504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937056991114052,0.0,0.3000701483679023,0.0,0.0,0.10057763473036828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528307032108018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749335183137017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265225945245373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072415854943958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3764835753824684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062237060489083625,0.060026584274095726,0.0,0.07437173201938765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903117396266388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729609799974191,0.05525509635305275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868426210269172,0.0,0.10459076288861838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theanxietyllama,2020/03/25,"How do you distinguish between self-destruction and reality? I have, in the past, had a habit of self-destructing when things were going well. Looking for issues where there are none, creating conflicts to try to get information. Etc etc etc. Now the issue is I have a really great boyfriend and things have been really great for over 3 years with no issues. My ex was abusive so this has been a wonderful change of pace. We don’t fight, he doesn’t gaslight me when I’m upset, he is wonderfully patient with my anxiety and depression. He is loving, respectful, and has taken my son as his own. He doesn’t do anything sketchy, he doesn’t “work late” or spend excessive time out if the house. His phone is always available, be put my fingerprint in so I can unlock it. I have all his passwords and log in info. He hides nothing from me. The last couple weeks my anxiety has been higher than usual because of the current events in the world. Maybe that’s the real cause. But for whatever reason, I’ve had a weird feeling that something is going on. I’m looking for evidence that is just not there. Nothing has changed, I am 99.99999% sure there is nothing going on. But I cannot get rid of this feeling.",3.1289610389610374,5.4862035194805285,4.085086580086578,84.47620129870131,76.57575757575758,7.316883116883115,26.950216450216452,8.296473431620573,1.9880891774891785,947,38,179,18,22,305,138,231,0.098,0.768,0.134,0.8975,1,0,1,0,1,0,33.0,1,1,0,1,12,10,1,1,11,0,33,1,0,3,2,29,48,15,0,1,6,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,9,0,1,8,0,1,4,8,4,1,0,8,4,18,6,24,39,6,26,0,1,2,1,17,10,0,4,12,123,26,1,0.0,0.13029185261624876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915006085482272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682475386455783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049273468298473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703431693015542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129654813769614,0.2326591161771636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167540357676655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471364508836387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3679238258548696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120433358399046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490550234174292,0.0,0.1874888148979752,0.0,0.0,0.2424760379200529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268861208204078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3443281305388767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963705254300587,0.1240465562090703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468766503170805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924870311202932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104757329061798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165463306050612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049750901319846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054630835156973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516550211672445,0.14089420539242328,0.11306347075313893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294372604306867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465728007498673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364175255263293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461131877206683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641221201405382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465976691986488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111212874629612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08820817636548307,0.0,0.098872734779494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23850710003173625,0.08005663411881192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081456622973849
mentalhealth,CanidArtist,2020/03/25,I was born into a bad life I have no idea what to do. I feel like there's no way out. I wish I had never been born.,-2.7914942528735622,-1.627511068965516,0.7937931034482766,106.58885057471264,90.72413793103449,3.8666666666666663,9.666666666666666,3.1291,-2.303216091954023,85,0,27,0,3,31,23,29,0.262,0.565,0.17300000000000001,-0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,5,1,3,4,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3402355164114973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060382110813226,0.2911095575580682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4600044297210213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878208736371025,0.19907808725288426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31427991927162385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234450617688416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4685911686283402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway97937,2020/03/25,"I feel like my own knowledge of myself is barely existant Whenever I do one of those dumb personality test, and even the more serious psychological ones, for most of the questions I could see myself putting any of the options as an answer. Whether it's like do you talk a lot or so you talk very little or of you are a nervous person or a hold person I feel that either and neither could describe me. Which makes it really hard to know if I have any disorders or anything because I can imagine myself as having the symptoms and I can imagine myself having none of them too. I've been diagnosed with depression and adhd-pi and I have meds for them, but when I go for a yearly doctor appointment and they ask me if I feel that my meds are working, I just say yes because it's easier, and I don't actually know if they are doing anything to me at all. It could be making me feel better, it could be doing nothing at all. I can't tell, I'm not paying close enough attention to how they affect me, I don't know. It's like if I went to the doctor and they started asking me what the economic situation of Luxembourg is. I just have no idea, I haven't been looking into it. My emotional state and my existence as a self are not subjects that I know a lot about. Just some vague ideas and guesses that I hope are right.",4.680806345009916,5.10804253558053,6.091848424763168,79.36094514210181,69.3370786516854,8.978982154659617,29.563560255562898,9.007467420416297,2.3299373870896667,1035,37,206,18,17,352,137,267,0.052000000000000005,0.855,0.09300000000000001,0.9261,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,3,6,2,9,9,1,1,13,1,30,4,0,4,2,63,50,26,0,9,16,0,5,3,0,0,4,1,0,4,14,13,0,1,16,0,1,3,9,4,0,2,3,8,42,5,22,41,12,13,0,1,2,0,20,6,1,16,6,166,56,5,0.0,0.0,0.10382316232025678,0.0,0.1278624073614541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470030176321416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510296257343774,0.0,0.19892415829947915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971104840269615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409500342202744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33978114938578396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163520093188236,0.10798555471127112,0.0,0.0,0.12193435253871122,0.2177932674736172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11967658498935548,0.0,0.1099312890743926,0.0,0.07027085678885474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21517979680663704,0.07600640569905134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06046497738746336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720268966580005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953062587958056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567117799010847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402070450865393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233880857503169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559331475660906,0.10663264950093328,0.0,0.0,0.0893424135404749,0.0,0.0,0.18090120391282086,0.0,0.0,0.14203485950049308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363548675841144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020859123384764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14418783078911573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786919506897327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695326073263373,0.11918329430584808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815738539693678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085811453070408,0.0,0.084607121473024,0.0,0.0,0.08478058205440019,0.0,0.11098997109239957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958897068069747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07530474539475385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058193695263953,0.0,0.1710275832669558,0.09299122356996947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778447255920607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09862637157353532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745458161348696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851290539300975
mentalhealth,godhasleftmeavoid,2020/03/25,"Seeking advice on how to deal with this situation. Please help. Homophobia is taught and my worst fear is my parents disapproval.

TW// homophobia, mentions of eating disorders.

I’m 17F, growing up in a pretty religious household. I feel like I should add that i’m homeschooled, and have been since I was in kindergarten. I think this has some attributes to my recent thoughts and mental health.

My parents are relatively strict, though they have a lot of trust in me as i’m the “good child”. They’ve been my entire life and they think so highly of me, i think this is why one of my biggest fears is letting them down.
I’m attracted to women. I knew this from a young age, probably around 6. I grew up “knowing” that being gay was bad, though. Their homophobia is subtle in ways that you wouldn’t first notice it, but growing up around it it’s very apparent.
My dad stops watching TV shows when gay couples come in, or closed his eyes when a commercial of a gay couple comes on. he’s very vocal, asking why they insist on rubbing it in our faces. My mother is similar, but she handles it better. She studied psychology so she’s knows they can’t help it, but she still disapproves of it.

I’d like to point out that even as a kid, I never had an issue with two boys or two girls being together. Even if I was taught that it was against God, I never minded it. Every TV show with a gay couple, they seemed happy. I thought it couldn’t be that bad if no one was getting hurt and they loved each other. So why can’t i feel the same way about myself? Is it because my parents are going to get hurt? I feel resentment towards them, because if homophobia is really taught how come I’m fine with it, even if I grew up in an environment that was against it?

I think my parents have had their suspicions of my sexuality for a while, because I’ve never shown interests in boys. To be fair, Im a very private person as well as I don’t know many people to show interests in.
My mother asked me if I found some boy in a TV show cute, and I said no. I remember her words very clearly, “No? You never like any boys. I sure hope you don’t like girls.” I hoped I didn’t either.
My thoughts towards my sexuality have grown worse as I start to open myself up to it more, and I think the reason I still fight it so much is because I know I also like men. This realization just came on much later than me liking girls did. I think Im so closed off to this idea because of my family, because I don’t want them to be disgusted by me or throw me away for liking girls or wanting to be with one.

My mom was having a conversation with our pastors wife, talking about how one of their kids (pastor and his wife) is gay. My mom said that if one of her kids was gay, it would wreck my father. And her.

I feel suffocated when I see a pretty girl and not in a good way. When I fantasize about women I get nauseous, which is new. I dreamt about kissing one of my sisters friends, who I used to have a crush on, and woke up in the middle of the night extremely ill. This extremely new, within the last month or so. Before this it was just intense close mindedness towards myself and privacy issues. 
I’m beginning to hate myself, and I fear that this throwing up trick will grow into something such as an eating disorder, as it does cause me to feel better. Like the thoughts and stress are gone when I throw up. I don’t eat in public anymore, and I try to avoid it. My “friend” makes subtle comments around my parents about my sexuality and it has more than once sent me into a panic attack even though I know they didn’t catch on.

I find hope in going to college and getting away from my family, but I never want them to find out. My biggest fear is causing a future relationship damage and trouble because of this. I don’t want to cause a possible future girlfriend or boyfriend pain because of my issues and issues with my family. 

I just needed to get this off my chest. Thank you for listening. 

(I’m sorry if this is messy, I’m currently writing on my phone.)",4.120878068161752,5.030942932014835,5.184280196009183,83.62453260197776,70.85414091470952,8.00354052622285,27.05458679145329,8.25012833911315,1.6530262934840194,3148,102,643,45,56,1038,321,809,0.132,0.726,0.142,0.5381,7,1,1,0,1,0,92.0,2,4,14,3,37,50,6,7,27,0,59,18,3,10,7,130,128,62,0,19,22,14,6,8,3,4,4,3,0,17,44,43,3,2,28,7,0,18,20,21,1,9,31,12,113,29,108,85,11,104,2,3,3,8,84,54,0,20,37,446,157,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04822813990865468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039468361492278066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03356240011041064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04894588823171246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318065226215421,0.09227862155255097,0.05614727938049805,0.09273938125275767,0.0,0.08241702673431811,0.24068583422063644,0.0,0.041996603502189436,0.0,0.0,0.08729917255897214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05644780723986971,0.0,0.15210040376602235,0.0,0.1275422559132877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16382772672532753,0.0,0.0,0.050881788210185054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312787816586205,0.0,0.043190002149062254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150433414849931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303913582990732,0.0,0.041582858368375816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957962522299616,0.22214780343336546,0.12477428084288185,0.03525849452892106,0.0,0.0,0.09021729066297496,0.04198047178946681,0.0,0.054114093730291635,0.07626152797222911,0.0,0.12892709265464375,0.0,0.056098010550545516,0.08279155686351873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05253823146338628,0.0,0.04872683933728727,0.0,0.05246097486073583,0.0,0.0,0.06616186745712675,0.05214519159627895,0.0,0.14705892023553693,0.0,0.0,0.10566891676907897,0.055714638174883126,0.10662153927009403,0.20605093813549005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356182886634938,0.04023008243462675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050467790324707454,0.034860176984806805,0.19289490071335105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041958990494106715,0.04454389557054085,0.0,0.032944166156489575,0.05003719123023431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04973720557218917,0.0,0.049833452477685024,0.11560557420816213,0.03939387748608157,0.0,0.07256171087311199,0.03659535221491585,0.19032416707888314,0.09533276652134433,0.0,0.04631536868032127,0.0,0.0,0.056189835506221836,0.0,0.05256037998105068,0.20066121254876626,0.0,0.052516116453325684,0.05790626384719416,0.2740087812356349,0.0,0.0,0.034215836801826945,0.043093993321017,0.0,0.05417585140078,0.046655465509814295,0.05563919901731478,0.0,0.1004214853329329,0.053211939940385776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03161742458443149,0.05074411328464304,0.048731103014978856,0.05298770634573514,0.05590844050601634,0.0,0.09389387746519218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03932873369068052,0.04493001151350032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04082612383553657,0.055475943503500005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03799510648204312,0.0,0.055247742064169464,0.03493300241055685,0.0,0.07882830739286165,0.0412621387912773,0.056534819513815684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04651554385795058,0.0,0.0,0.039668861153552865,0.0,0.0454385156145717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897442326405956,0.14547010989113746,0.1567261949331622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033508114027903116,0.0,0.09642333779948728,0.0,0.0,0.04262599412935126,0.0,0.16288881533002791,0.1164410289627474,0.11752468077426576,0.0,0.0,0.04437515690074302,0.0,0.13360287642486254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050295923982122286,0.03505965270502152,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,diningroom_table,2020/03/25,"No hope for the future I am 15m and I have felt nothing but despair and sadness for the past few years, I was going through my first year of highschool before this quarantine stuff happened and I cant Express how much highschool just exacerbated my feelings, I feel as though I cant do anything to change or help the world around me. I am part of the speech and debate team at my school so I read the news often and keep up with world events and the more i see happening the more I feel as though the earth and the people on it are just on a downward spiral and because I genuinely care about all of the people and animals on earth, it fills me with absolute dread and despair that I cant do anything to stop it, it feels as though with every passing day I lose more and more hope for the future as I have very big aspirations to help the world around me but it terrorizes me to no end that I might not live long enough to help people, seeing the terrible things going on around me like Homophobia and racism and how people just refuse to accept eachother hurts so much and it hurts so much more knowing I cant do anything about it. I just cant shake the feeling of absolute dread and pain whenever I see anything terrible happening, I feel like the void is slowly eating me up as my last shred of hope for the human race is slowly being squashed as I just see the way people treat eachother and how those in power are reacting to major problems like global warming. So like I said in the title I have absolutely no hope for the future and it is eating me up inside

Sorry if this post doesnt make to much sense this is my first text post and I'm in a very bad state right now and wanted to get a lot out.",6.575890804597697,5.563066876436782,6.767816091954025,80.97545977011495,65.58045977011494,9.572413793103447,30.82758620689655,8.515128840125781,2.106958620689656,1355,40,280,16,18,437,158,348,0.17800000000000002,0.682,0.14,-0.9603,1,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,5,22,27,0,4,22,0,23,3,0,5,1,64,51,39,0,7,10,0,8,4,0,1,1,2,0,1,16,26,2,3,9,2,0,5,10,15,0,2,3,14,34,12,46,46,15,46,0,6,4,0,8,22,0,9,19,201,50,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712454680641256,0.22007075541974055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880379275670985,0.05023263672983527,0.0,0.07011962742031727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401624144745551,0.0,0.0871723723014067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05314368161123837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686394704514963,0.0,0.0,0.07298537357591972,0.0851452297598065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942881787357695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499952478457392,0.0588693440325561,0.07912064166873979,0.0,0.0,0.1401853862135822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04305262305727671,0.0,0.09366404115561887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21860842083840606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657007391782629,0.0,0.0,0.3273825606781881,0.0,0.0,0.1764301028146252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324434941796312,0.0,0.0,0.04528701408898201,0.06717015558788257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16103348177423588,0.0,0.07276413042856457,0.07292483536886787,0.0,0.09218885688298308,0.0,0.07005682686282026,0.0,0.0,0.05500522575464095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741748811087073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24230531553048765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906873952343914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768353181411953,0.0,0.0,0.08923536531563875,0.07866382190148873,0.2856423529933089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784026546608027,0.0,0.0,0.0788493785074638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242617363323203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037245812722548,0.07838495444714906,0.0,0.0,0.08339711979520477,0.2626608747690396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224439041008137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889332844402399,0.0,0.0,0.09433272074684604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05474547229188526,0.0,0.2428841633782929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359836521218075,0.0486039398809987,0.06540835957645652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061307862450704
mentalhealth,theoriginaltard,2020/03/25,"No one can hear me 
Skipped through like another page in the book, seen but unread.

Screaming and crying for help but no one there to hear me “somebody please god anybody help me, I can’t escape the pain please just end me” the 1000th prayer for death unheard again. 

The blazing fire of the unknown anger, yet it all feels so cold.

My tears soak the pillow again, building every day until the hurt is drained down to the feeling of nothing. 

Hopelessness, mentally facing the cold floor but looking up at the stars every night to see no sight of heaven. 

I’ve been alone long before quarantine, and as I think to myself... it’s the same as being in a crowd... unseen again. Die, Die, Die my brain and heart scream... if only I could. 

I’m not mute or anything, but I’ve always been to the ears of god. No one loves me, no one will. 

Injustice to the desert of my soul, getting weaker every day... until finally, I can die.",2.464203089056852,4.645848223463691,3.0851856720341786,91.69736772921459,77.93854748603351,5.5525468287873805,22.26125534012488,6.522977012572876,0.4433947420308906,708,21,143,6,17,221,113,179,0.32,0.532,0.14800000000000002,-0.9939,0,2,0,0,0,1,34.0,0,0,0,0,7,9,1,0,14,0,9,6,4,0,1,17,20,14,5,2,8,0,3,1,0,1,1,5,1,0,2,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,7,6,0,4,3,14,13,3,23,14,3,18,2,2,4,1,6,6,0,2,13,89,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784203703782218,0.0,0.0,0.10270829269104324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943297058711506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10157696683879584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050345890761712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779493244363789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855326842095163,0.0,0.13558819106696124,0.15921147802373878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5124265858444926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932728829497948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119994054595829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482547846921604,0.0,0.0,0.1352176469248832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448999713541106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782417445515257,0.14627175934339132,0.16547253780913784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321403438064428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603043905391641,0.0,0.0,0.10923660604330426,0.10365480108530677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140543227167704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439403459852627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158359322318839,0.0,0.1184397702918894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33457258041493954,0.09387832255870286,0.1313441624217027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709904047090848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836217783353456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909253702679148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aiden1steaksauce,2020/03/25,probably doesn’t belong here hey i’m 12 and i know probably don’t know what i’m talking about but i’ve been feeling depressed and really need some help so please help me with this reddit,-0.1665934065934067,1.955766333333333,1.7110622710622714,92.71846153846157,103.6153846153846,5.305494505494505,18.391941391941394,6.868970318607317,0.6085941391941398,153,5,31,3,7,50,30,39,0.09699999999999999,0.608,0.29600000000000004,0.8473,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,9,9,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,8,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543849352028211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493380767187459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3959344013615109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32463379888996186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189986381689654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32420613439482754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6368755416171944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892090800420893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23739152773616298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IseeMyCatOverthere,2020/03/25,"Memory loss on lamictal. Will my short term memory come back? I've been titrated up to 250mg of lamictal daily over the last year and a half. Over the last few months I've noticed that my short term memory has deteriorated. It's hard to understand people when they talk to me. I have to have things explained to me multiple times. I have trouble articulating what I want to say. I feel like I'm getting dumber. I'm not quick like I used to be.

I was put on lamictal during a hard time in my life. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I feel like it helped for a little while. But now I'm living a stable life and now I'm having memory issues. 

I want off of of lamictal. I'm hoping if I stop my functioning will return to no normal over time. Or at least I wont get worse. 
How is it coming off of lamictal? I've heard it's hard, but I want to know your experiences. 

Thank you.",1.0675927523727324,3.2008316120218616,3.7706873741731393,85.1835375323555,82.60655737704919,7.568478573482888,20.01409260857061,8.532816995589336,1.2528316939890711,687,19,147,17,19,242,105,183,0.083,0.8109999999999999,0.107,0.6107,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,1,1,6,7,0,0,6,0,13,4,0,2,0,23,34,9,0,6,5,0,5,3,0,3,4,2,0,0,7,5,0,1,5,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,4,7,21,5,25,26,4,33,0,1,0,0,8,13,0,3,20,90,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11242935002508088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519004013355675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840388046955064,0.0,0.0,0.1675736271177223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430251056414451,0.0,0.0,0.14786013245075852,0.20891026723789866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278130130368414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3929364073597665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980039958887727,0.0,0.0,0.1452232468449212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526091695264952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803552542602106,0.2383674454825837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20655019413499864,0.2142979610051818,0.14654459120018087,0.12910942174553652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670642185819635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432584328070685,0.0,0.1664653257107966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013662055845118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469852052344717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162750441531496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222412436614716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11752107535127675,0.0,0.1346139783726053,0.0,0.0,0.09713791986740897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557752437725604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15221367230086474,0.0,0.1262817364130432,0.0,0.0,0.2587219775305857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14900430464300565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415686245953596
mentalhealth,cubsfan_21,2020/03/25,"Social Decline So I’ve been having problems in high school. Most of them are social problems. For the past few years I’ve had some great friends. I was socially active a lot to my friends and life was going good for me until this year. So when this school year started I thought that most of my friends were gonna be in most of my classes. I was very wrong. None of them except one are in my classes. The one is only is in my first hour class. After that class, there’s no one I know in the next seven classes and my social life has been pretty much non existent. I try to stay in touch with those other friends but all if them are in a different lunch period. And I can’t hang out with them because of the virus. Before this virus hit, I couldn’t hang out with them because they were “busy”. I’m not saying that being social is something that I enjoy but I at least want a little bit of a social life. Now there’s only two people I talk to and one of them treats me bad. I feel like my life is falling apart.",2.365834959576248,3.774261535545023,3.3434792305547845,93.19819626428772,75.82464454976305,5.722999721215501,21.416504042375244,5.900188976854957,0.03839871759130231,788,19,174,4,17,252,114,211,0.067,0.8109999999999999,0.122,0.8592,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,7,1,6,13,0,0,8,0,21,5,0,0,1,27,30,11,0,5,5,0,2,1,4,1,4,1,0,0,9,9,1,0,3,0,0,4,5,4,0,7,9,3,27,9,28,16,11,31,0,0,0,0,19,13,0,6,14,125,36,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298026217700365,0.12116533692911613,0.0,0.08456721401487431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849998400619026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383359240540642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05025079378641617,0.07099890000661828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453473010216529,0.0,0.0,0.3071307876977528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564813826407335,0.08335735183366451,0.0,0.10956959128274443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500310048500114,0.0,0.0,0.0978717739522782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0546180399619163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28078728295414285,0.04855328464286837,0.0996074047934098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844914739064127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305759538830306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056944491926767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693767001929259,0.1511697863533666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487187121082187,0.06889933357032699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110776269560658,0.0,0.1901913205331276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903297757686248,0.0,0.201160854311718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6078478489262136,0.0,0.07650952775781893,0.0,0.0,0.070343466963505,0.10592855478344207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987991387741504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889862848050715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674742149108502,0.0,0.09708229194406937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200099625869546,0.058618391698577924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865919632146837,0.0,0.1919972747463538
mentalhealth,WrongFall9,2020/03/25,"is this normal? hello , i have been going though a lot lately and i dont know how to know if what is happening to me is could be considered normal or not. Very recently, my friends have stopped talking to me as much and since then, i have been having a lot of thoughts about them leaving me and i have fantasized about killing them, my family, and myself. I have also been having a lot of episodes where i have something similar to a panic attack but im not sure what it is. I have always had abandonment issues, but with all the quarantine stuff happening and no one talking to me anymore, i feel like im slowly spiraling into insanity or something. I have been starving myself, self harming, and thinking up elaborate plans of killing my friends and family. is this a normal thought process to have?",5.072584670231727,6.475309104575166,5.722127153891861,78.81139037433157,69.06535947712419,8.962329174093881,32.86333927510398,9.339509955726095,3.116613071895425,635,29,114,13,11,206,85,153,0.225,0.716,0.059000000000000004,-0.9823,0,1,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,1,6,10,3,1,6,0,24,0,0,1,2,34,33,17,2,5,7,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,6,9,0,2,6,0,0,1,4,6,0,1,7,1,20,4,15,24,5,8,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,6,5,97,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10077521131641244,0.10485567917022527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497433496410465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14336176447351048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006137832103753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14769019693287894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23759395619645235,0.0,0.06371764138855843,0.09002608931576164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19471980356259533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161798278309094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228716438977386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722385157267576,0.13152830550497802,0.0,0.0,0.278836790302241,0.0,0.1385105556115648,0.0,0.1421519059425053,0.13343309516107354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061565212128990875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32140372494264025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09263650010083327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37040773450656506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539192462451145,0.0,0.0,0.1478530082097945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442592036604225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146251238720102,0.0,0.0,0.10424200805906704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940270505258557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535529215905393,0.0,0.0,0.14425854547755565,0.0,0.0,0.11876889702401115,0.0,0.0,0.202574300745312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074617413987678,0.1238104016332954,0.2000857752391972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397666741989817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raspberryrae410,2020/03/25,"I'm not meant for this world I've never felt as though I fit in to how the world is. I'm not dumb but I'm not smart, I do ok but not well. Stable sometimes, not stable other time. I just hung up on the suicide prevention line; she kept telling me to watch tv even though I dont really watch tv. She also suggested sleeping but I have severe nightmares. I'm at the end of my rope I feel, the end is near. Whether I take my own life, or a higher power calls me home. Thanks for listening kind strangers",0.10758566978192974,2.2023252336448635,1.8931074766355136,97.3714992211838,86.38317757009347,5.061993769470405,18.26246105919003,6.42735559955562,-0.2296473520249225,388,10,91,4,12,127,71,107,0.188,0.708,0.10400000000000001,-0.8659,1,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,1,7,6,1,0,5,1,5,2,1,1,1,18,16,10,1,0,11,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,7,1,1,0,3,5,13,5,11,13,1,12,0,0,2,0,6,8,1,1,4,55,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666003518346269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21272685146336576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24415963459791534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3690347099800352,0.0,0.0,0.13759911323574087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533722861742666,0.0,0.20002818113471396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20897062917535394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21694223791668502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471486915366996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606759034280047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334606723134844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23535208415492506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20847910958822774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060423688451537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278777377838587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15663722333562946,0.0,0.1820884287832356,0.1918010376415527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4093636957630304,0.0,0.1214781153034197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873124820199839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thebiggestladeverto,2020/03/25,"I feel so alone in this world I have no true friends, I never had a girlfriend and I hate my parents. I have constant mood swings, one day I’m really happy and the next day I feel so alone and depressed. I think about death often but I would never be able to kill myself because I don’t have the guts. I don’t know what’s my purpose in this world.",-0.6611999999999973,1.5000869466666698,1.1803333333333337,99.9585,92.86666666666667,3.5333333333333337,16.833333333333336,4.935628992294339,-0.8992666666666662,271,7,63,1,10,88,49,75,0.247,0.667,0.086,-0.9017,1,2,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,2,0,3,0,8,1,1,0,3,13,14,6,2,1,1,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,2,13,3,4,11,0,10,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,6,42,16,0,0.2181280907155244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4518298359821453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296885950844306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357189746395824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813491464496077,0.0,0.1878734049070588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22058423336313365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16852522179669008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322014086420412,0.0,0.21535633038347565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413264140113844,0.0,0.11987749411486008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364676614601175,0.0,0.23198169908519606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780923946819766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24220543102043146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973844040134548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976767290423536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549519372436454,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MXNNIE,2020/03/25,"How to recover from years of bullying I was relentlessly bullied in my teen years and it has affected my mental health tremendously. I’ve never talked to anyone about it and this is my first time openly discussing it. 

Now that I’m older the affects of my years getting bullied are really starting to show. I’ve never had a friendship last more than 2 years and I struggle to make friends with anyone because I’m scared if I get too close to someone they’ll use anything personal I tell them against me. I have a really hard time trusting anyone but I can’t help it. This all just ends up making me feel worse and I feel so alone. I can’t tell anyone how I feel, I just feel like a burden on everyone else. I just want this to end, I’m only 17 and I can’t keep carrying on this way..",1.7391381987577643,3.9017496645962737,3.432511645962734,88.37559976708077,80.30434782608695,6.509472049689442,23.72709627329193,7.645422480735847,1.2021704968944102,620,22,127,10,16,206,98,161,0.16899999999999998,0.754,0.077,-0.9125,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,1,9,6,0,2,4,0,10,1,0,7,3,29,25,10,0,2,5,0,5,1,1,1,1,0,0,1,9,8,0,1,4,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,2,5,20,3,17,22,2,22,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,1,16,79,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440219690300683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3889298579166271,0.0,0.114432741461224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476835941770454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616496925763067,0.0,0.24632791676031496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287571095737055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28124725811335743,0.09934293794839344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828251488742456,0.0,0.0,0.10743573062911856,0.0,0.14530394830047194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456849743867596,0.0,0.0,0.14781196531313695,0.0,0.0,0.09320752886870784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360098416036695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335068715664127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793662920154445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856443559472564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013758082698485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21449993452996965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575974208033154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141992905927053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17816800691832052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922114163534274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782324384302605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842584424517753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537343135637898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176941229944877,0.2430853365026828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16217147203459306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010131306959995,0.0,0.0,0.08201990803524586,0.11037762885750288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171180369356476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3581947203803571
mentalhealth,JackSucksAtKai,2020/03/25,"I’m alone It’s 2am when I’m writing this

I want to die

I’m tired

I need help

Depression is getting the better of
me

My friends try their best to help me

My schoolwork quality is dropping

I have almost taken my life on multiple occasions and I feel like actually doing it again

No one can help me",-0.7882812500000007,1.3500067343750004,2.209125,90.623375,98.84375,5.6850000000000005,22.025,7.1686216300943375,1.1275799999999996,237,10,51,5,10,83,47,64,0.18600000000000005,0.532,0.281,0.7561,0,1,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,0,1,2,2,5,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,0,6,13,2,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,1,11,4,4,12,1,4,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,1,3,30,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.2418128160802468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481315562733207,0.2566415691812656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600462540308899,0.21915512153612696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21342603610037028,0.0,0.2571727698660296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12529292950277454,0.17702526672739732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19144630975734184,0.0,0.12946300328764826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4982766163274546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502540058361768,0.12106044126872115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18373733970730516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16791275004737286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848046552739954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682369852307789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14615629854271694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,palpikofi,2020/03/25,"I don't know what to do. I feel toxic? Hello. This is my first time posting here and I'm still kinda hesitant about this. Anyways, I'm a 18F who's struggling with her mental health. I have a tendency of invalidating what I feel because I think they're fake or something like that, tho some of my old friends have been telling me that I shouldn't. It's just hard. I don't know what to do. No, I haven't been diagnosed or been to psychiatrist because my family is not really open with this kind of things. I've tried telling them more than once but it always doesn't end well— making me feel more bad about myself. These past few weeks, I think starting from the last week of February, I've noticed that I've becoming more worse. I usually vent out to the same old friends mentioned earlier, my former classmates from my senior years in high school, about this when they're available or if it's okay to them, but I can't do that right now. They're kinda busy with their life now, considering we're in college now, and I understand that. And besides, they're not obligated to do that so yep. They're the first set of friends that I actually considered as well- um friends, because ever since I entered high school, I kinda got bullied. I don't know. We got separated from each other due to our career choices, so there's that. I met a few people in my university which I now hang out with, but they're not really... I don't know. One even said that they kinda get pissed off every time I go panicky, which become more worse since I entered collge. Just like my old classmates, I know they're not also obligated to keep with me and shenanigans but I can't help but to feel hurt? Now I don't know what to do. I tried telling them about it but they just brushed it off so I never opened up to them again. I just don't know what to do or what's happening inside my brain. I want to get help so badly but I can't. I'm sorry if this is kinda inconclusive or it doesn't make any sense, I just wrote down what's going on inside my mind these past few days and I haven't been getting my sleep because of it. I don't know what to do. I feel worthless and toxic.",2.0969356659142235,3.9852381941309285,3.3260897291196407,90.94195626410836,77.8939051918736,6.416455981941309,22.587415349887127,7.365786028017652,0.6996971106094807,1692,51,370,22,40,548,187,443,0.128,0.7979999999999999,0.075,-0.9817,0,0,1,0,0,0,49.0,2,0,7,2,29,16,1,1,6,2,31,6,3,2,2,72,66,28,0,4,23,0,6,2,4,1,3,1,0,0,36,17,0,1,16,0,0,5,21,7,2,3,9,8,57,9,44,56,10,52,0,2,0,0,25,15,1,13,32,238,93,5,0.0,0.0,0.08134798344697364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666349313198912,0.06936275059019355,0.0,0.0,0.05668811029034415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920534544453067,0.2032635489526674,0.1841306088330676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305807039779684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05376073222478811,0.0,0.0,0.08460931954728987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383280582336221,0.0,0.0,0.05505893258415126,0.07540449335724107,0.07023495499784169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858501540311222,0.0,0.21074828291632325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14181307695594708,0.0,0.0,0.25761696984590265,0.0,0.13065751955360574,0.0,0.09475157315021072,0.0,0.13334227678195334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371556014724187,0.0,0.07467478151935958,0.0,0.0,0.08860848804200666,0.0,0.0,0.11174979224031556,0.17615023732489676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923931525100713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409478863062484,0.0,0.08680730399508922,0.3665027282841627,0.06795006741297845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058880102470462624,0.08145161974494468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128778146728638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400794298781995,0.0,0.08417050749977095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429288333845327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949066688286384,0.2624189832633842,0.0887763868932597,0.056487343527964966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591543730809211,0.05779178854663415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983647339382816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680595225863668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118955184651392,0.0792950811596434,0.0,0.0,0.16873088539204445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791360588650278,0.0,0.08342086638564603,0.0,0.0,0.06417511202005262,0.0,0.09331543885786196,0.059003107254187226,0.0,0.06657193419998557,0.0,0.0,0.08714666587835662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21858268463301592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05538112127672404,0.10682829546855868,0.0,0.0,0.09721654745669447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319283825866758,0.0,0.0,0.08678139141929493,0.0,0.0,0.09180999463242924,0.0,0.04916827961086346,0.0,0.1337337933447733,0.0,0.14990249685750906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699032772670458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053681534729434974
mentalhealth,Green_Eggos_and_Ham,2020/03/25,"Does depression ever fully go away? Context:

I've struggled with on and off again depression since high school (currently 20) and I am starting to wonder if this is what I'll have to deal with for the rest of my life. So, has anyone whose experienced depression in their younger years seen it go away as they got older? If not, how have you managed to deal with it?",6.550352112676054,6.382970197183102,6.456443661971832,80.38776408450707,65.33802816901408,9.916901408450704,31.834507042253517,9.516144504307137,2.6570253521126768,288,10,57,5,4,91,56,71,0.18,0.82,0.0,-0.9329999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,2,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,5,1,0,1,1,11,11,7,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,4,0,0,2,2,5,0,14,9,1,14,0,3,1,0,6,6,0,3,6,40,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992350147975474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760250690248008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4126149574298825,0.517070506135151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751200333655396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18101345693302365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274573973265065,0.0,0.16004846263782754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114301282198731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413455673291864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20252480652236088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16553535106550227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416408484209352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20920131610848716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21701376258084726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886606277969326
mentalhealth,infplacey,2020/03/25,"CV isolation is killing my self-esteem and hurting me mentally I have OCD so I already nitpick at and get mad at  myself a lot. Being alone for so many days has been making it worse. I am keeping in touch with people, but unfortunately it is not enough.

I don’t want to do anything drastic. I just want a good enough distraction and some confidence to put myself out there creatively.

Not to mention, my neighbors give me incredible anxiety and they’re home constantly. When will this end?",3.6474154589372003,6.230243500000004,4.685797101449278,79.67466183574882,75.95652173913044,8.001932367149758,29.78743961352657,8.841846274778883,2.8121990338164253,390,18,69,9,9,127,71,92,0.226,0.6609999999999999,0.11199999999999999,-0.6923,0,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,2,1,2,0,10,0,0,1,0,16,16,8,1,2,4,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,1,11,1,9,13,4,9,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,2,4,51,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20934527384447735,0.22305500507454112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15462856662504598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663354122937508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21843025566913998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303568498998605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902680242818267,0.4177077537338345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560435693423756,0.1939011003203321,0.0,0.1695366920585202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20275243781102908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163838835881428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796620477470128,0.22362641952274875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718433308897052,0.0,0.0,0.13492305651419825,0.2049276569362723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036990636338463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401311922895365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20319604487174253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21086522273297373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23844251295790314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205987298681012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hungryghost999,2020/03/25,"Changing I know not being true to your true self, personality, dreams, and desires is generally frowned upon, but i have very conflicting views with my family which I haven't disclosed to them as they wouldn't take them very well. This has resulted in me not opening up to them about anything and generally being very distant, even about regular matters for fear of slipping up. This has gone on for all my life, not being able to express myself as fully as I would have liked. I was wondering if it's okay to start conforming to their idea of a perfect person until it's actually me and let go of the things that conflict with their views. I know you may see me as weak but I need to do this in order to protect my sanity and feel free, as ironic as that sounds. Please don't tell me to follow my dreams and be myself around them, I can't. I have to conform. Please someone tell me it's okay to give up.",7.231356660527929,5.955041000000001,7.508581952117865,77.04984653161449,64.41436464088397,10.47538367096378,33.370779619398405,9.444778638647367,2.7817766728054028,715,24,144,11,9,234,103,181,0.1,0.718,0.182,0.9491,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,7,1,5,10,0,1,2,2,19,2,0,1,4,35,31,15,0,5,6,0,1,1,0,3,2,1,0,3,10,9,0,3,5,2,1,3,7,2,1,0,2,5,29,9,35,21,1,15,0,0,3,0,16,9,0,3,3,109,39,0,0.16453899544118925,0.0,0.16056632451516145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540157361710015,0.14647459023545065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17406044008456212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086764546846812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15511272130636333,0.18515211443501933,0.08319585993871202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578407973829067,0.09351130291186577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18574449809774346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18085265765600306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16825227069662474,0.11621875847630468,0.08038544198687736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200358025360085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28733820850866904,0.0,0.361228813722864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13111627643107435,0.0,0.17165005686667992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13941335688809772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164615478508356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371284744113613,0.0,0.2876286687307816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093123973592833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40728570946977416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14794031724059414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843552179233935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688378150701463,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cneedham_01,2020/03/25,"Hitting a downward spiral Yo, new to this subreddit but I just needed a place to talk. Late last year I got dumped by the one person who really made me feel happy with myself. Since then I’ve been trying to better myself and managed to land a job that should be starting soon. Hit a difficult spike last week when I found out my ex who I still love is now with someone else. On top of that, because of Coronavirus I’m now not allowed to move to my new job and so I’m stuck inside with nowhere to go and no one to talk to. I know this is a difficult time for everyone so I wanted to spread some love and let people know that even though it may feel like everything’s crashing down, at least there’s others out there feeling the same way.",2.906688596491225,4.338314888157896,3.8671052631578964,89.89807017543863,74.46052631578948,6.908771929824562,23.19298245614036,7.492282038375204,0.8316166666666671,581,16,124,7,12,187,102,152,0.094,0.74,0.165,0.9317,3,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,12,8,1,0,7,0,7,2,0,2,0,26,26,10,0,3,3,1,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,9,9,0,0,6,0,0,2,2,3,0,2,5,3,11,5,22,15,3,27,0,0,0,2,8,9,0,2,16,81,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236954685117447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13401345427521386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658149389720158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008225634379148,0.0,0.0,0.14479068950928056,0.13618283577830495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298500463220031,0.1082510293249926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16614170359679434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861163737464697,0.0,0.12119010758117812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130347341294474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30073463928444155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665507224771054,0.24702970966644475,0.17092923013475392,0.0,0.0,0.15494678157418942,0.0,0.07402851367006975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735183455834057,0.1433786571938509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16104938475290625,0.0,0.11235546493699124,0.0,0.2926917397414618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20535744264584335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504984975962536,0.13230766648014333,0.1583136253568607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707217513392707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534482789449058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838846613377644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10725169973588616,0.0,0.12100978117804682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435835737966613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887465977707934,0.0,0.0883567022349063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287699128175833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893746415529699,0.12027520209321453,0.12154594322095465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757851937118653
mentalhealth,Siraloneknights,2020/03/25,"How do I not kill myself during lockdown? Ok so a bit of backstory, I'm a 19 year old Male in california and tbh my life hasn't been the most happy or fun. I grew up privileged and have money but I never had many friends, never dated a girl, for past 5 years AWFUL mental health, depression, anxiety, suicidal thoughts, poor health, confidence and self esteem. I came to the realization earlier this year that if nothing changes I will DEFINITELY kill myself sooner rather than later. So I finally got off my ass and started to improve myself. Got my liscense started going to the gym and starting getting my resume ready for some part time jobs. Was also finally looking forward to actually trying to date people.Things were looking better I was finally actually feeling slight glimpses of genuine happiness. I only saw it going up from that point but..... literally in what felt like a couple days the entire world shut down. Now my school, gym, dating, finding a real hobby or passion, and possibility of applying for a job are OUTA HERE. I am already feeling bits of my depression coming back and it will only get worse from here. I feel so angry and screwed over like I am sure many people are. Finally I am fixing my life and out of nowhere a mass pandemic says FUCK YOU and stay inside for HOWEVER LONG WEEKS!?!? MONTHS!?!??! realistically Ik it's the right decision to stay inside and not do anything but this makes me feel like I should just kill myself. Things wont get better for a while and all my goals have been shut down. I don't know what to do or think.",3.5708832046332013,6.012343125000001,4.957181467181467,78.350945945946,75.52027027027026,7.606949806949808,27.125482625482626,8.527137837955566,2.2876779922779917,1239,49,216,25,28,412,179,296,0.166,0.648,0.18600000000000005,-0.7054,3,1,0,0,0,3,42.0,0,1,0,3,11,20,5,0,13,2,22,8,1,2,4,46,48,25,4,3,11,0,5,3,1,4,4,1,0,3,10,15,0,0,10,2,2,6,7,7,0,0,12,9,28,13,29,32,6,49,0,2,3,4,6,16,3,6,30,141,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.1712906926933073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685014364873304,0.07018511972934935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713948823891551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222258280704101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748536849414509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15524087260433525,0.19163188089322566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003790367726466,0.0,0.0,0.0928430461449944,0.07560121713841414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710958499804848,0.0,0.05660074578545653,0.0,0.15118261370516986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17750517141309716,0.06269886983965857,0.0842675401797438,0.3845662262195338,0.08021502676361722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780651981868085,0.0811367282177364,0.13755975306084298,0.0,0.0997570063261597,0.0,0.14038633772754705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868535670702961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18657880198241852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17418515207059124,0.0,0.2912947527968571,0.0,0.04823299203438701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398111312240118,0.12863168614558773,0.0,0.0,0.07766868878889811,0.14739990152711824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05858338574630662,0.17795855336439226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844582334055931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005266759059399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353785558737579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842122617337872,0.0,0.09209392274683516,0.0,0.0,0.13349748738889194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950402394822928,0.08378100370481352,0.060844750371660136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296567957287768,0.09894111883614304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989504541859913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495027615690167,0.0,0.06979373446166685,0.0,0.08882220865498779,0.0,0.0,0.09155735871242077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18636017792405213,0.1870902413432058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959999551855041,0.0,0.08271686210193441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058306734989968786,0.05623585230598447,0.0,0.06967509126431208,0.05117609880877903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059586233277335116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039926845101789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943937151467897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16955209359255788
mentalhealth,0und3rat3d0,2020/03/26,"Dad just died... Hey guys I’ve had depression for a really long time and it was starting to get better like I was able to keep up in my classes and stuff but last week my dad suddenly passed away and it’s thrown me into a depression, although I don’t feel really sad I just can’t seem to do anything and it’s very frustrating",1.9313043478260887,3.611918869565223,3.77326086956522,88.49293478260874,77.69565217391305,8.078260869565218,23.09420289855073,8.841846274778883,1.5328724637681166,258,8,57,6,6,87,49,69,0.223,0.726,0.051,-0.9390000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,6,1,0,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,11,11,6,1,0,3,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,1,6,2,8,8,0,11,0,3,0,0,4,4,0,1,7,34,10,1,0.24029846592228765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19774516269781414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22576831887577645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125244654605605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41393743317215004,0.0,0.2493918693922921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150212453134634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554603049096727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379332609340589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21358831755930466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19587532193567453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173976925052756,0.0,0.0,0.2126565805894889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3078827009274005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187586983964402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700844909892117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750842525767481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011996790835954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19827140047709596,0.0,0.0,0.19275293478283712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eolhc96,2020/03/26,"Covid-19, saviour complex and feelings of worthlessness Hey all,

So, like almost everyone else, I'm self-isolating at home with my partner. I'm a grad student so I haven't lost my main occupation, though I can't access my office anymore. I know a lot of people are anxious right now for all sorts of valid reasons, but what makes me anxious is that *I am not helping.* I just can't stand it. Every time I hear about doctors losing their lives to the virus, I get a ""that should be me, not them"" feeling, and it's making me go crazy. Catching the virus doesn't scare me nearly as much as it angers me to know that I'm young and healthy and yet I'm doing sweet NOTHING during a global pandemic. I feel like this could be a ""Where were you when X happened?"" moment and I can't bear the fact that my answer will be ""at home, turning a blind eye to all the people I could've helped"". Bear in mind that I have no training in anything health-related. Defining my self-worth in terms of how useful I am to others has been a regular pattern in my life and I know it's a problem that needs fixing anyway, but right now I'm getting pushed into a lot of anger and self-hatred that my poor partner doesn't deserve to deal with. Any ideas how to curb this? (Apart from getting a healthcare related job, I've already applied everywhere I could, but I have zero qualifications so I doubt they'll need me.)

Thank you, stay safe and take care!",3.440392777953754,4.835966933797913,4.216891035793477,88.06494377573647,73.04181184668991,6.611910041178334,26.982736775419703,6.980632752743323,1.1789177700348432,1118,40,229,10,22,358,165,287,0.139,0.747,0.114,-0.8004,1,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,2,3,2,15,14,2,2,14,0,24,4,1,6,4,50,51,20,0,6,6,0,3,2,2,3,3,1,2,2,15,11,0,2,10,0,1,3,9,8,0,1,3,7,34,6,26,40,8,26,0,3,2,0,12,13,0,5,10,147,49,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11363514863952508,0.0,0.12522945741221775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717118836268222,0.0,0.0,0.2564031786016429,0.11254297511150367,0.0,0.0,0.0933854563049275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570176785760322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718167974961854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169942569447025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615293861538666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479908042269218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956129056696775,0.10843626344301496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721386938610053,0.08107107697080239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17786791623197942,0.0,0.0644940487677613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10035115561706084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062533547509895,0.12790169408808924,0.0,0.1521282720891284,0.0,0.2276620313235697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810659616142647,0.0,0.0,0.1126126986562819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18709909539446887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015521165354614,0.11088248060463847,0.0,0.100206083754311,0.0,0.0,0.12695656856779985,0.1238782650702509,0.1929555185729584,0.0,0.0,0.15149932326355614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145837823060012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834218267955524,0.16828992024917594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888838619204046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734731593295906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858629629953724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11667769622267815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19382485275534156,0.0,0.0,0.11361459729875426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3551572952303688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209559868878781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532382896629295,0.0,0.0,0.10447835184245667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114948197448971,0.0,0.06617186970358488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343508809482515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801142383385122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sissinou,2020/03/26,is anyone else's mental health deteriorating during this quarantine? i've never stayed indoors so many days in a row.,5.5757142857142865,8.540671571428575,7.047857142857144,63.23464285714289,71.38095238095238,8.009523809523811,24.785714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.3963142857142863,97,3,14,2,2,33,21,21,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,6,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25435931764766545,0.3727295671187429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346042082978739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038865925409815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3866748707708572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688098534968043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665987448419301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805650215428189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3877348022670309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,littlelunaris,2020/03/26,"How Do You Know You're Finished with Therapy? I've been seeing my therapist since last September, and together, we've managed to make some real strides in my overall mental health. For reference, I started therapy in an alarmingly increasing depressive state. Not to mention there was a lot of trauma in my past I never fully processed and even addressed. Since then, we've gotten my depression under control through a mixture of lifestyle changes and talk therapy. We've also managed to reprocess the trauma that played a role in my anxiety and depression with EMDR. 

In our most recent sessions, my therapist asked me what I felt we needed to focus on next, but I really couldn't think of anything. She said that's a good sign that I'm getting better. And I do feel that way. 

But I don't know how to tell when enough is enough. I don't know how to tell if I've finished therapy. How do I know I've reached a good enough place to stop going to therapy?",5.178064381270904,6.490998570652177,6.026739130434784,77.06341137123745,68.72826086956522,9.57458193979933,33.719063545150505,9.851270322608157,3.5228817725752504,763,36,135,18,13,251,107,184,0.096,0.82,0.083,0.3527,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,2,1,0,2,8,10,0,1,7,0,9,1,0,6,1,35,26,15,0,3,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,5,8,0,2,8,1,0,2,5,6,0,0,5,4,19,4,22,20,7,23,0,3,1,0,11,8,0,4,11,87,24,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083683855909493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005245672143546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861131851928505,0.0,0.09782811570529926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254921031966716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106995916763701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736726596076165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27038945242477386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243760122190409,0.0,0.06911644686515278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052911205555412906,0.0,0.1004747547263957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054672227762239074,0.0,0.059471658490808425,0.17554102711978084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123179415431972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300386618163163,0.08529891524240255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896467909628304,0.0,0.0,0.06985075512287107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545664899867303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759228065014369,0.08070798772348144,0.0,0.111290196749322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989464246870083,0.0,0.0,0.1093308212139039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910790519584405,0.06703769558993443,0.0,0.10332343296830318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995405106203614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338780630449143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731253761352415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406763872837632,0.0,0.0,0.08748716051469027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410897071359515,0.18292712673509687,0.0,0.5983482905359596,0.2429997512573418,0.0,0.0670517195022125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306162269279077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chrystalmaze,2020/03/26,"The stay at home order is depressing me and I can't control my thoughts. I haven't left my house in weeks. I work from home now and just stare at a computer screen. Parks are closed, so I can't get out and exercise. I'm not an extrovert by any means, but getting out daily for work or going out to eat every once in a while kept my happy. Now I just exist. This isn't living. I've dealt with issues in the past, but I keep thinking that nobody would miss me if I die since I can't see them anyways. I realize my thoughts are nothing compared to people actually dying. I just don't know what to do or how to control these thoughts. I can't make an appointment to talk to anyone now.",2.003541666666667,3.4972044930555555,3.6761111111111116,90.08,76.9861111111111,6.7444444444444445,23.805555555555557,7.492282038375204,0.923622222222222,533,17,118,7,12,178,90,144,0.069,0.893,0.038,-0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,4,9,3,0,0,6,0,12,2,0,4,0,31,27,11,2,2,9,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,4,8,1,4,7,1,0,1,8,2,0,0,4,3,18,1,18,22,0,19,0,2,3,0,2,10,0,3,6,77,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.14826638186247335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033208280184216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623629747282473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34081544306242745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086116228575054,0.0,0.31536852942428883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554671616760312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801156484218953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875925348918762,0.0,0.08634800969538882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16173734773326806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3048058489673555,0.0,0.0,0.1753122819103569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585803866238376,0.0,0.1350465710350214,0.0,0.0,0.08349935542784431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165077531183719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341611521818331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141761359340754,0.0,0.0,0.16550146465243915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578547333076544,0.0,0.0,0.16180553127130282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14503889374024967,0.10533241300020628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107231057580607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568198059714528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619422090574445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221193826260816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735364159323673,0.0,0.3618576184822963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187287767802014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212205892762093,0.0,0.0,0.10793007459551428,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SomethingIDontLove,2020/03/26,"Loosing interest in hobbies/complete lack of motivation or drive What advice would be good to give someone who has lost all interest in hobbies they used to enjoy? My girlfriend has really crippling depression and doesn't have the motivation to even get out of bed. For the lack of motivation thing I suggested setting really small targets to achieve in the day, really simple stuff, and gradually build up. Any other ideas would be much appreciated. But she also has expressed that thinking of old hobbies just makes her sad, she's an incredible Artist and musician. I have no idea how to help, I know it's a staple sign of depression though. Any advice would be fantastic, I just want to try make her life as good as possible Like she does for me. Cheers.",6.9281215027977625,8.044834410071946,7.3268585131894515,70.04090327737812,64.61151079136691,11.069864108713029,34.86890487609912,10.980518767755715,4.1701168665067945,609,27,103,17,9,199,94,139,0.12,0.649,0.231,0.9481,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,5,6,11,0,0,5,0,12,1,0,7,1,27,21,10,0,6,4,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,1,0,7,4,0,0,7,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,0,12,7,20,14,4,10,0,4,0,0,12,6,0,1,3,72,19,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30117604870981896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12323640498896725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20959114470549026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16157444583649952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938392150918064,0.0,0.2654580042280654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13485689283953572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178381893019546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051264761799827,0.1478299893682861,0.0,0.25850918167190434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329223692714072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34792788219885995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846911790291314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10884776378992177,0.07528711987850083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16822202645229306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205730384996058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132837043362025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16170555816414295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737283891225399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29616768420123984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305712807352838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17641148355196806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237942792599396,0.09874321361002107,0.15140577328705185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046260689480884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309582858183333,0.0,0.0,0.09089415711742124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284118262958976,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PeroxidePlebeian,2020/03/26,"Depression like clockwork? Hi everyone.  This is my first post here.  So for as long as I remember,  I have been depressed from roughly the hours of 4 PM through 9 PM basically every day like clockwork.

I wanted to ask if anyone else has this problem, and if anyone knows about why this is?  It seems to endure major life changes, and doesn't seem to be affected by when I go to sleep or wake up.  I am on Pristiq for anxiety and depression, and this is the only depressive symptom that I have that persists through medication.

Any ideas?",4.38529411764706,6.147421794117648,5.231519607843137,80.26433823529412,71.25490196078431,8.629411764705884,32.357843137254896,9.188382445141503,3.006701960784313,421,20,78,9,8,137,74,102,0.185,0.769,0.046,-0.9356,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,4,7,0,0,2,0,10,5,2,1,0,15,16,11,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,1,1,7,2,16,14,1,9,0,4,0,0,2,2,0,5,7,53,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068069110063354,0.0,0.12450905315919218,0.0,0.0,0.2276076769761907,0.16676430747025334,0.0,0.0,0.15215630547354791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17217586953884656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496513230445743,0.0,0.5607312352330991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596301883517384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371302256993231,0.15552177999175384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844145874858255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249884627856317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16028336684685127,0.0,0.0,0.1837334230368412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894472735309814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11496044585238124,0.15903020083864144,0.0,0.0,0.14403527871421073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16396107297037105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378442396503007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15587670862564218,0.0,0.0,0.15573696056108302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843725363265992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29633665703968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628750561006019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16916737637759802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959985989952201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686334158751554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ohshhhugarcookies,2020/03/26,"Mental health server Hi! (If this isn't allowed, tell me right away and I'll take it down!) So, me and my friends made a discord server for mental health, dedicated towards friendship, recovery, love and support. We're looking to extend our community - so far age range is 13-18, but we will welcome those beyond that, as long as you're respectful and kind.
We're holding our first event soon, and have channels for to all different mental things and general interests, plus a suggestions channel to suggest more.
Hope you decide to join us!
 [Here is the link](https://discord.gg/WpMAYmG)",6.310288461538459,8.439117913461544,5.818461538461538,76.50153846153847,66.98076923076923,8.661538461538461,34.153846153846146,9.188382445141503,3.3586000000000014,469,22,75,9,8,144,79,104,0.016,0.691,0.294,0.9849,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,4,1,0,1,5,8,0,0,3,0,5,3,0,2,1,17,11,13,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,5,8,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,8,8,13,9,2,11,0,0,1,1,12,6,0,2,5,49,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792979552794211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993843941560524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16232613700542664,0.0,0.0,0.14744044921583366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4057023196589571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18954453040086605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19872771431023725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16888503341068106,0.16025529516662015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17223814280603789,0.18057489767582668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5769574353381123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162974038705639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21655994268951656,0.0,0.0,0.14348592357264392,0.0,0.16680023955653944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267838435333048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295538130673155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,13mrselfdestruct,2020/03/26,I cant see my Native American son for his birthday because of (COVID-19) I have always been there and contributed in every way available to me for My sons birthday since he was born. Unfortunate circumstances then happend which I may enlighten everyone about at a later date. Overall I am actually very happy that him and his older brother and their Mother are where they ended up. They are currently quarantined on a Native American reservation. And are in very good company with the people that I now call family regardless of me and their Mothers relationship. I am unable to deal with my Fear for the first time in my life. And need advice on coping with my emotions that do not involve drugs alcohol or any of the other failings that have been the self destruction of my entire life. I dont trust pharmaceuticals due to past involvement with the government treatment system which left me severely doubting psychotreatment through any kind of drug therapy or for profit counseling regimented by a book. I also beleive I'm quite Insane and should check myself into my local mental Institute but already know this path and fear I may have never actually made it out of the facility. Im not even sure that anything or anyone exists outside of my head. Is there anybody out there with any useful knowledge that will help? Any guidance that isnt completely regurgitated by society and its cling to become acceptable to everyone else. I need real help not false hope or a deity that I can't ever meet.,8.745085784313726,8.918788533088241,8.748176470588238,64.63996078431374,60.727941176470594,12.106274509803926,37.98627450980392,11.602472056035307,4.807260980392156,1219,54,189,33,15,398,170,272,0.092,0.8270000000000001,0.081,-0.0917,1,1,3,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,4,3,9,13,1,3,10,0,21,6,1,2,3,43,29,16,0,5,8,5,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,14,17,1,0,4,1,2,0,8,5,0,1,4,1,30,8,35,21,0,29,0,1,1,0,22,13,0,8,14,138,44,4,0.0,0.0,0.225348988724886,0.0,0.0,0.11282836837417427,0.0,0.12339402435821666,0.0,0.0,0.12741545723198935,0.09233511468636783,0.09607383636538144,0.0,0.0,0.31407314073079473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073388552633373,0.0,0.09501558866252363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038471216525748,0.12751897691746966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789986041708532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105996590889792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190365034726387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135320889866779,0.0,0.2677990920445041,0.0,0.09645388893979992,0.12987948353089826,0.1022652770357919,0.0,0.0,0.07626172310834184,0.10444220989474826,0.09728192028397674,0.22065824403663398,0.0,0.0,0.10884752761919726,0.25985424947723834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821212562945224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684425206695743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291170558321325,0.0,0.0,0.11849757304168974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547838164174436,0.0,0.0,0.11468006062069387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12471903677160948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12023615915432301,0.063455029617901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545006577403825,0.0,0.16310879490191024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925316688507716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635878478477138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17122758158650112,0.08905160047373319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022177657393137,0.08004698182884676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280830885619055,0.0,0.1314213113961412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396323934952995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200845939624548,0.0,0.12045230170857844,0.13043947052219845,0.0,0.09551156126133233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882179838306577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320411384694874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673269629079724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972230687418177,0.0,0.19053688671073093,0.0,0.09164855483797836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Suckydays,2020/03/26,I have social anxiety and I want advice I posted this on another forum but I'm not necessarily getting any help other than opinions. [my post on the other forum](https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/comments/fpl8ru/so_a_family_fight_broke_out/?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share),14.06725,19.312503225,11.025000000000002,33.83000000000001,54.25,11.0,35.0,10.686352973137794,5.463750000000001,259,10,24,7,4,77,34,40,0.045,0.799,0.156,0.5187,0,0,0,0,1,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,15,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3081790937565421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3417067888816051,0.0,0.2144646272883665,0.33069635465585445,0.2412596760489573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647695086322154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113880443325867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6040808001088511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32148331650067885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860153162126161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scrispycookies,2020/03/26,"Rapid and random images always going through mind? For a few years now, whenever I close my eyes, try to sleep, or even attempt to relax, my brain gets flooded with all these random images that play at x100 speed. Usually they're things I've never seen before, frightening images or faces, or just flat out random things that look like a bad Picasso painting. They fly by so fast it's hard to catch every single one but it's never based on a single subject. I currently have bad anxiety and still have bouts of depression so I'm not sure if that links in. I don't drink or smoke but work all the time. Any explanation or tips would be much appreciated so I can get some good sleep",4.285746268656716,5.7299914552238835,4.958388059701496,83.38026865671642,71.01492537313433,8.046567164179105,23.84776119402985,8.548686976883017,1.4334650746268656,541,14,106,9,10,174,100,134,0.128,0.763,0.109,-0.5798,1,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,2,7,8,0,0,4,0,6,6,5,0,5,27,12,13,0,2,10,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,5,1,0,1,3,0,2,4,3,0,1,1,4,7,5,12,9,7,17,0,1,3,0,1,5,0,10,11,65,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15621887436627716,0.0,0.0,0.12767303349646794,0.0,0.143624405996468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31351845458948463,0.0,0.0,0.1597571612290547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20958550352380187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16170448762679782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839186181719034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400379741170307,0.0,0.15818325423329124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19617802022439645,0.0,0.10669980627939933,0.15747159288202986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818263712499462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172272036213223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15765850959003522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18956892315500973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801417229380772,0.0,0.28960102589459663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127220866341011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3757611609845147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993339417220186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769474343177386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494588623829824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947561540046327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746652654799065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20677458571084645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13668059115696451,0.0,0.0,0.13336865657573438,0.0,0.0,0.12090162022600301
mentalhealth,j_pricer,2020/03/26,"Self-isolation, online classes, and anxiety/depression. I'm, for the most part, making this post to vent because I don't have many people I feel comfortable venting to, but also because I am looking for any advice in terms of maintaining my mental health during these challenging times. I apologize in advance if it's lengthy.

I know my case isn't unique in the slightest, but just getting this stuff off of my chest and receiving any sort of support would be incredibly helpful. I know we're all struggling right now. I hope that this post can potentially help others too.

I'm a 3rd year uni student in the US. For the remainder of the semester, we have to work from home and attend online classes. The exams are hell. Virtual workspace is hell. Trying to get absolutely anything done and waiting to hear back from professors regarding questions is hell. The professors have been accommodating and supportive for the most part, but that doesn't change the fact that I can't focus and I have no motivation to get things done. 

I finally put myself out there during these past two semesters and made some friends despite my crippling anxiety and paranoia, but now I can't see them, hang out with them, or study with them. I grew up having long-distance friends, so I don't understand why this is so difficult... but it is nonetheless.

It's also harder for me to meet with my therapist. We had a tele-session last week that went well, but I still just feel very disconnected from them. I felt uncomfortable for every second of it and like I couldn't accurately explain how I feel about anything.

I'm overwhelmed with assignments, which is nothing new, but still makes me feel stupid and worthless. I've had problems in the past with school where I've fallen behind, but this is different because I don't have the responsibility of going to class and participating. Instead it's all pre-recorded lectures with the occasional face-to-face meeting. I feel less obligated to work on things, whether it be that I wait until the last second to complete assignments or that I don't even start them.

My mom is older and severely immunocompromised, so I'm not comfortable doing anything that involves leaving our property. I don't even like getting the mail. All I can do is go outside every once in a while, but it doesn't help that its been mostly raining since this all started. I'm usually locked away in my room playing games.

I haven't felt genuinely depressed in months, probably closer to a year. I know it's not something you can beat and forget about, but it felt nice not having to worry about it for a while. I'm scared that I'm going to start cutting again despite being clean for 8+ years. My partner and I's relationship feels like it's falling apart. I feel incredibly disconnected from them. There's just a lot going on and I don't know what to deal with first. I wish I could just have a break from it all -- maybe sleep for a few days, who knows.

I'm sorry if this is a mess or is just all over the place. I'm really hurting right now and I know that I need help. I'm scared and unsure. I've never felt more alone than I do now, even knowing that there are many, many people out there in similar circumstances.

How can I push myself to get assignments done without losing my mind? I've tried the rewarding system, it hasn't worked now or in the past. I'd love to hear anyone's thoughts, whether it's to vent or to share any advice or offer support. 

Thanks for reading and I hope that everyone is in good health and staying safe.",5.710541646211747,6.701628216494846,5.987450171821308,79.01049942726235,67.27687776141384,9.098883979708722,31.58373424971363,9.270117722386633,2.7263305580101447,2825,112,528,52,45,903,306,679,0.10800000000000001,0.7340000000000001,0.158,0.986,1,2,1,0,0,0,79.0,4,1,6,10,36,38,5,4,26,0,55,5,2,6,8,115,117,49,0,10,29,1,11,3,3,1,2,2,3,1,43,31,0,3,23,3,0,14,20,16,1,4,14,15,59,22,73,97,17,80,3,5,2,1,36,27,3,17,37,354,102,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272040356330692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503419612634961,0.0,0.10043043873325193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281033633238976,0.0,0.04803616696931153,0.0,0.0,0.043906045774625015,0.0,0.15501887805557046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05899571450975372,0.04828363328350911,0.0,0.1148333580385006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642624457741153,0.0,0.06583684620179574,0.0,0.0,0.05013478145287015,0.0,0.0,0.04049603216310818,0.0647364131708517,0.10816634837840657,0.0,0.0,0.06560490205813713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927758921339634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442175985278718,0.0,0.10581094709329966,0.06000102001817272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222487761264126,0.044859045837338636,0.2411629719763694,0.06878622379315423,0.0,0.053411353304721514,0.0,0.0,0.0970268136696985,0.0,0.16403270860942373,0.0,0.14274592606931902,0.05266745353008218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349119452725725,0.14154364718350115,0.0,0.16835422411519474,0.0,0.0629860973861475,0.1247344397763835,0.0,0.0,0.06722077678384482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415641947379697,0.10236869929284856,0.0,0.06648829664314435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203187744365413,0.0,0.0,0.05556947484727013,0.05272996910417841,0.0702488574412951,0.0,0.05338402285780144,0.056672772898272224,0.05941587618391415,0.08382909590621647,0.19098552149986933,0.06308360638924314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063280171612371,0.0,0.06340262563098482,0.07354193396150219,0.05012045407693453,0.0,0.0,0.046559917102980665,0.0484295239999073,0.060645484163730015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06025119302537161,0.0,0.0,0.06687206944879275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359965329592305,0.17982792489420102,0.08706496473903885,0.0,0.06560490205813713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027590624425645,0.0,0.06770104296204392,0.06008403767427545,0.0,0.06312390622252421,0.0703420825276282,0.0,0.0628095923604101,0.0,0.040226547322609454,0.0,0.0,0.06741575270121182,0.0,0.10724907425737903,0.0,0.0,0.12573269329704687,0.06354946332553307,0.050037572248230335,0.0,0.06550637613930722,0.0709377645610459,0.0,0.05194268742804548,0.0,0.06283794785573693,0.0,0.0,0.048340811088076,0.0,0.07029117456030756,0.1333347759716998,0.06692855655609471,0.10029250261141,0.0,0.0,0.06564445903678316,0.07188250376296734,0.0,0.21376889435100635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05781098943582925,0.0,0.0729070480967091,0.0834332262839655,0.0,0.0,0.04985031023269795,0.036614869902919636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526410688734944,0.0,0.061339245874329575,0.0653693108825379,0.0755317660998395,0.0,0.06915717739825293,0.05181047100072477,0.0,0.0,0.050368435961213764,0.0,0.056458088300301565,0.058209369098515776,0.0566605545473791,0.0,0.07220839085050576,0.060529825439501236,0.0,0.13714128151259222,0.06376893311322154,0.0,0.044606061283917815,0.0,0.0,0.12130912658770668
mentalhealth,nicothestud,2020/03/26,"A boring diary.(sorry to the world) So I'm really struggling right now, I wrote a WHOLE blog entry tried to post it then read the rules of where I was going to Post it saw it wasn't compatible tried to put it somewhere else and it deleted itself.....
So ya that's pretty much my life right now
Well quick back story I have depression anxiety and OCD AND tourettes and ODD and I'm dyslexic (thank you auto correct)so sorry for the bad format and spelling errors. Well let's get way to personal way to fast, I've been suicidal for a long time now and I've decided to try and start a diary to vent and express my emotions and feelings which is not something I do usally so this is difficult at best, but I've been trying to grow and find new and healthy coping mechanisms and if you're like me then you should probably stop reading this because I don't plan on sugar coating anything,this is for me, and if you want to join me on this attempt at a journey at growth then okay but I'll probably be saying alot of triggering stuff so protect yourself.well that's all I can think of right now if I think of something else I want to say I'll try and post it, anyways that's it
I don't know, drink water, 
Or don't do what you want
Try and take care of yourself
Later, maybe
Sorry that's a joke I know I'm not that funny
Anyways try and stay healthy and don't worry about the corona, the extoverts will all die from isalaion and the introverts will take over the world when the air clears.",3.483986224709426,4.832321046204623,4.385449849332758,87.0852604390874,72.86138613861387,7.381776438513419,26.375233175491466,7.893859768569023,1.4284043334768262,1179,40,244,16,23,381,159,303,0.102,0.748,0.151,0.9469,0,0,3,0,0,0,23.0,0,5,0,3,17,13,0,1,15,1,20,4,0,1,3,45,40,33,2,7,8,0,1,1,0,3,1,2,0,1,19,19,3,2,7,5,0,5,7,5,2,0,6,5,20,8,27,29,6,41,0,1,1,0,10,13,0,5,18,152,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402109402268706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744024260161904,0.08079051343678488,0.058983965128740885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015435939545863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986532138943295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333919990456212,0.0,0.10042154776184688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947879104095994,0.0,0.0,0.1616610382208784,0.10884191597656093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048924736125208965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843683790041917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050553078285913884,0.0,0.054990907276609664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635347191411797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894360070757904,0.06834441155414811,0.04727202219453557,0.0,0.0,0.0856295075560247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720837140922432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112969382149786,0.0,0.0,0.09345135901877262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844870528433325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780078447076478,0.09843965114497326,0.20864717493920615,0.0,0.0,0.097270471238095,0.0,0.0,0.19357226169218628,0.0,0.06198689923526221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478973961803612,0.0,0.15389478580466895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14898106774295405,0.0,0.3249445138545912,0.06848718796263382,0.10313322836117243,0.0,0.08089564767225649,0.0,0.10115450463677572,0.1107669888195707,0.10583967640136313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550287528284714,0.0,0.0,0.0890835583802497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399973309818775,0.0,0.0,0.05642150276986003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4598555640056277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712145697514721,0.15360708302594048,0.0,0.0,0.17399762412715614,0.0,0.0,0.10802902446942447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826442223659934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_yowhatisthis,2020/03/26,"I feel like I'm going insane This whole staying at home thing due to the virus isn't good for me at all. I had some paranoid and delusional thoughts for very short periods of time in the past, but this time, it's really bad.

It just hit me yesterday that it's happening again. I didn't notice it until now. And this time it wasn't for that short period of a time either, it went on for more than a month. I got mad delousional and now paranoia is starting to set in and will probably get worse. I keep telling myself now that there's no chance what I'm thinking is happening is really happening, but... it just isn't working yet. 

I'm feeling hopeless and just wanted to vent. Sorry if this isn't the place for it. I'm sure I'm going to be fine after some time (at least now I'm aware that it's happening and many people have it wwwaaaayyyy worse), but just the thought of someone seeing this gives me some comfort. Don't feel like I can talk with my friends or family about it.",4.3165079969535425,4.737465707920798,5.132376237623762,85.94167936024374,70.13861386138613,8.789642041127191,27.41964965727341,8.841846274778883,1.8059020563594816,771,24,167,13,13,251,110,202,0.139,0.757,0.10300000000000001,-0.8245,0,0,0,0,1,1,21.0,0,0,0,1,12,10,1,0,6,0,14,0,0,0,2,30,41,12,0,2,10,0,3,2,1,1,0,0,1,0,22,7,0,1,6,0,0,3,7,3,0,0,7,4,11,7,23,31,8,34,0,1,1,0,4,9,0,5,22,107,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770448540141636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160393147585308,0.0,0.1956695150311976,0.1843064793641644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09966033660317064,0.0,0.06739396806163621,0.12374266499479937,0.14662036712066592,0.10819393007603333,0.10316817401797393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4562753791606087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939135955123962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146556700808318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12603976897190033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307795281127412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029616687406689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686036509171646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123139235762294,0.0894281009966382,0.0,0.1347711292301021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907719886487704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16527354016600626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027914058899261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092960793612445,0.0,0.0,0.14439806589464896,0.09130251835665402,0.1374902920640343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157518689767208,0.0,0.0,0.10368037883183158,0.11274631967079647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569778910451098,0.08265405723472262,0.0,0.2048134328918892,0.3760867868575459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643344420396207,0.07608392101108162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957860097446416,0.0,0.14401703855986056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390906671951928,0.0,0.26291152811158525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,suraque,2020/03/26,"I’m done. I turned 30 on the 12th of March. I was planning on killing myself, I booked an expensive cruise for myself to take and jump off in June. I got a refund on that cruise just now. 

I don’t know how to die anymore, I don’t have a gun and I don’t have access to enough OTC medicine to kill myself. 

I don’t know how to get mental health, I don’t know who to talk to, I don’t know what to do and I know everyone is feeling these same things. I already feel like such a burden to everything. I can’t do it anymore. 

Why I’m rambling on reddit as I’ve never done it before. 

I would like to know an easy painless way to die that won’t horrify anyone and google only suggests that I call the suicide awareness hotline.",1.5179255583126547,2.9230803161290337,3.2200000000000024,93.21307692307694,78.09677419354837,5.801488833746897,22.89081885856079,6.297961479604792,0.3400223325062033,559,17,128,4,13,186,86,155,0.195,0.73,0.075,-0.9705,0,0,0,1,0,3,14.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,2,0,7,0,17,1,0,2,1,18,31,7,5,1,1,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,8,3,2,3,9,3,0,0,4,2,18,2,20,25,2,14,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,6,83,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16068740977183685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888176557238597,0.10181589602917916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239058173226497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14868700858160994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022463147395752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2980250190174257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045700715541374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13913932598652806,0.13086744766080324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725247243270148,0.10402585489906058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607670839178124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645990458522633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547796589627438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221981062263285,0.0,0.4801501121358022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227817452554878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467435124234621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230561289049064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107451401278852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15927683280388058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948274752383624,0.11703809959854085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673871266285494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15838497579388888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11558070901423988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313929557757096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343919653496417,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nrschoen,2020/03/26,"39M, trying to fix others has left me broken... I have always gone out of my way to do things for others, far back as I can remember. It made me feel good to help other people, see them becoming happy fulfilled me. Part of the reason I became a nurse. Dating was always hit or miss, as I'd often self sacrifice to ensure the other person got what they needed, even if it was just me thinking what I was giving up was helping. Fast forward to present day. Job stress, dont even want to talk about that. I've been married 5 years now, to a woman that I wanted to show what love could look like. She had horrific things happen to her that she has shared with me over the years. I wanted to help. Now I find myself more alone in a marriage and house then I could ever have dreamed of. I have forgotten how to communicate, I feel anxiety and depression like never before. Have started therapy, and think its just starting to make me realize some things. I need to stand up for myself, my own mental health. My own sanity. Especially in these times. Will be on here more, looking for just some sort of connections, support, advice, just other people who care.",3.66,5.351617600000001,4.703666666666667,83.60350000000003,73.0,7.311111111111113,23.166666666666664,7.984000788550335,1.2312666666666674,900,24,171,13,18,294,144,225,0.081,0.758,0.161,0.9617,1,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,2,0,14,11,0,1,6,0,19,2,0,4,2,35,44,9,0,8,6,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,3,19,5,0,0,8,2,0,2,2,3,0,0,9,5,27,8,31,30,7,28,1,2,3,1,17,10,0,6,18,129,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906064688145655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618950452235705,0.0,0.0,0.20276129613275068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932072735585742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368744635126773,0.0,0.0,0.1345627176944149,0.10367687390111074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124224009605465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945586662925189,0.0,0.0,0.07857672637109125,0.0,0.10494062140281836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14279558338274126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609483539718014,0.11021126380698308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232119390833578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135956110447696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688003902079988,0.0,0.10219361906931564,0.09744658566576246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774271776586417,0.1297009554149515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951023229967384,0.0,0.0,0.24500036969859684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14058701208114066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120907408923882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237952651096796,0.0,0.0,0.11904974825156255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20462984310002136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996536526794236,0.1152879626872492,0.08132915225407561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278607221254564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18068564600729028,0.09397052630478836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319408567574384,0.0,0.16893704260341236,0.10638599645815316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527182189772418,0.0,0.0,0.1380209791500834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709071266504864,0.0,0.12710570192971365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17247797125868453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395673189011666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13826259858755593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979303841893585,0.0,0.0,0.13933466899925112,0.0,0.2428352646587776,0.1561403164418322,0.0,0.0,0.0710458891845664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272136846861526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21559318260208188,0.09671092812911736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569219425054685
mentalhealth,Squiddlingkiddling,2020/03/26,"I’ve been casually suicidal for the past ten years, and it’d be an understatement to say I’ve lost hope. When I open up to people about my depression, they talk to me as if I’ve not actively been seeking help and it’s my fault for not being proactive. I feel like I’ve already tried everything. I truly have no hope things will improve anymore. I think about death, and dying at-least once a day. It’s routine to talk myself down from it. 

When I was twelve, I went to a psychiatric unit for the first time due to suicidal ideation. Since then I’ve had twelve more ER trips for concerns to my safety. I’ve overdosed three times to date. I’ve ended up in critical condition for the past two suicide attempts. 

The times I’ve acted on suicidal thoughts are astonishingly low compared to how often I have urges. I’ve tried to stop them at all costs, but I cannot.

In the past ten years, I’ve seen eight different therapists, six different psychiatrists, I’ve had seven acute impatient hospitalizations, and been on at least 37 antidepressants, antipsychotics, and mood stabilizers. 

I’ve been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder, PTSD, anxiety, chronic depression, ADHD, anorexia...etc (the list goes on and on)

I’ve tried changing my life style. I tried eating better, I tried going to the gym, I tried establishing faith in God and praying. I tried everything from yoga, essential oils, to finding new hobbies. 

I also tried weed, and opioids, and cocaine, and going on drinking binges until I couldn’t stand up. I used sex and partying to distract myself from wanting to die. I’d over eat to feel better, and when that didn’t work, I’d starve myself. 

I pursued higher education, started a career in social work, excelled in what I did. Excelled in painting and music, and caring for others. I found new things I enjoyed. I made more friends, I forced myself to be social.

I’ve done so much soul-searching. I’ve prayed and prayed for a day where I could stop obsessing over my own demise. I can distract myself sometimes, I can restrain from acting on my suicidal urges most times, but they never go away. Even on very good days, the feeling does not disappear, it’s just a distraction. 

Even though I’m alive, I’m in constant, intense pain. My chronic medical conditions (there are so many and no, none of them have any cure and little treatment available) mean most days are agonizingly painful, and I have little mobility.

I ever so truly wish I could go to sleep and never wake up again. How in the world am I supposed to have any faith that things will get better?",5.119703538590136,6.904111152577323,5.604224017832268,78.23006408470326,69.43298969072166,8.624686542212316,30.6338813039844,9.142720283898788,2.757871551964336,2059,85,366,41,37,661,249,485,0.177,0.6659999999999999,0.157,-0.8754,2,0,3,0,0,2,78.0,0,0,4,10,20,27,0,4,15,0,31,14,2,4,4,57,56,35,8,8,7,0,3,1,1,2,8,1,0,1,12,21,3,3,8,4,1,9,11,11,1,8,16,6,45,15,60,31,9,73,5,4,1,1,12,31,0,6,33,227,57,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414485131024516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726368587755435,0.055991254527353804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522568538846253,0.0,0.053561555345604105,0.0,0.06943641900577524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578173129189041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857686767057629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138532124914726,0.0,0.07406696245365836,0.0,0.0,0.07566172592511164,0.0,0.11180312839045646,0.0,0.0,0.1806164483829356,0.0,0.12060824625959853,0.071064112058737,0.1453297700973951,0.14630228905544213,0.16048732658343387,0.0,0.06127090945587475,0.07165001752691866,0.0,0.06858839330234505,0.0,0.14328637613472686,0.0,0.0,0.06201282334754865,0.0,0.07808562914751803,0.09248896400372716,0.06333289753827016,0.0,0.0,0.1258505738815358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620560245717084,0.050018983985600084,0.0,0.0,0.06399276652600827,0.05955502565269433,0.0,0.07676822348357785,0.054093690007544507,0.0,0.03658013349102538,0.0,0.159165360225471,0.05872555836867097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04692981695632095,0.0,0.0,0.13908209212141975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049453916216075984,0.03420596610332738,0.1403475598845706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764300313778288,0.0,0.0,0.06625022230989823,0.0,0.07098458117026378,0.0,0.07626724788497141,0.0,0.07053310471487438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146934238999959,0.0,0.10800031700029186,0.1352425333425032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745640685932508,0.0,0.0,0.1490025494826587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20051273778899376,0.048539831774174716,0.061134707837041224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818442038520311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05567902093388594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05791742561920207,0.0,0.07006591978975871,0.14274367545735486,0.0,0.0,0.06924697691442754,0.0,0.0495572290163814,0.0,0.0,0.11707194461859875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3829271750289816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255138129275488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129322421189995,0.13954527336015018,0.04486301273217537,0.06878973132805268,0.055584371505536335,0.1633060674495721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3802866438496539,0.0,0.06839482873091132,0.0,0.0,0.060470787145418925,0.0,0.057770000919515674,0.04129687073122945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490493603693824,0.0,0.0,0.08051420350477248,0.0,0.0,0.10194402542007623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901751868448809
mentalhealth,Anonymoushope1,2020/03/26,I hate myself I keep thinking negatively about myself and how much I hate my life. I just want this never ending cycle of misery to end :(,0.7850000000000001,3.3352992592592616,3.212870370370372,84.05041666666669,93.44444444444444,4.181481481481482,14.157407407407408,5.985473137389443,-0.3701037037037041,108,2,19,1,4,37,22,27,0.408,0.5539999999999999,0.038,-0.9287,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,7,5,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,7,0,3,5,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,17,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5541187531306365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6176759425389661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780424733397341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209489982216899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22995347002474276,0.0,0.24126058838877584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20043787183751546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845051497618236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spirit2020,2020/03/26,"Is it normal to feel depressed starting a new job? I started a new job 2 weeks ago, i hate being the newbie, i feel like i cant be myself, people dont seem too interested in getting to know you. I left my old job because i needed more hours, but i never hated the job or the people i actually really enjoyed working ther. I have never been in this position before where i left a job for another and wonder if my my feelings are normal and will pass?",5.646451612903228,4.8001777311827984,7.65109677419355,73.33664516129033,67.38709677419354,9.590537634408603,31.50322580645161,8.841846274778883,2.592984516129032,351,12,67,5,5,126,64,93,0.069,0.8009999999999999,0.13,0.8137,5,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,2,6,2,0,6,0,9,0,0,0,2,16,21,5,0,4,3,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,3,15,3,5,17,1,16,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,4,11,47,17,6,0.0,0.0,0.12294660856500025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168120955651402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321099345080358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680142435524036,0.0,0.10720693978503792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10851371628418552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765759164270956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19111072369002705,0.09000621442341324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658237948131487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487751339450789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240733007346231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6251207632104686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923998844687089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27377376252624697,0.0,0.0,0.06155162049158031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341888138911526,0.1943402067607642,0.2433609698808624,0.0,0.0,0.2468839735198233,0.0,0.0,0.13220374432653473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17468913434949146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071146356881961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469520478287662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17835062712840144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106038063617276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662916130226813,0.09172113345791696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,A-v-o-c-e-t,2020/03/26,"Any ideas of how to talk to parents to go into therapy I’m not going to get into specifics about the issues I’m dealing with but I need to see a therapist and needs to talk to my parents so they can help me find one. The issue is that I get very anxious just thinking about talking to them about this, I’m worried they will be disappointed or angry even though there is no history of abuse or anything like that. Any ideas of how to approach this with them? Texting isn’t an option as they will just respond with “we will talk when I get home” which isn’t fun.",4.843041871921186,4.868704905172418,5.419408866995075,85.72362068965519,68.91379310344827,8.007881773399015,30.364532019704434,7.447530270364453,1.7021221674876852,443,16,94,4,7,143,72,116,0.17300000000000001,0.7390000000000001,0.08800000000000001,-0.9061,2,0,0,0,1,0,5.0,1,0,5,0,12,3,0,0,4,0,9,0,0,2,0,22,21,10,0,2,6,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,0,4,0,0,3,4,1,0,1,0,1,11,2,21,17,0,6,0,1,1,0,15,2,0,3,2,66,16,0,0.0,0.17329697872985392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989268396990556,0.0,0.0,0.16523483404294095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203614593135948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15079007004253456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660490886070487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336811466012371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292481378775429,0.0,0.16624853877423965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803657633644264,0.0,0.14671307184562274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302248009869833,0.0,0.3053198058353725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145640073925225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21690337222125367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911115993689223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248140819588592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11655216368191268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4702405762267968,0.0,0.0,0.1672637547093826,0.16982187227585266,0.0,0.09371901400114703,0.14370202536231466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068176422622162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485365255764582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,radsadrat,2020/03/26,"any advices please i can't do this anymore. i've been struggling for a long time. 
how do i tell my mom to get me a professional support. be aware that we're not close. please share your advices with me 🥺",0.3955813953488381,2.637329953488376,1.7593488372093056,97.7664651162791,86.67441860465117,4.370232558139535,22.55348837209302,5.6839178017228535,0.008966511627906737,160,6,37,1,5,51,36,43,0.11199999999999999,0.7140000000000001,0.174,0.3843,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,1,0,4,7,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,6,2,3,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,20,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4886283001006175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002043355090898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479501200841941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062379399261947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22125756796504087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928174055358555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5488881434491389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613725142585706,0.0,0.0,0.28371682955240884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21852626366554065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578718061206136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,desovar1,2020/03/26,Anybody else? is anybody else experiencing anxiety during Quarantine?,11.696666666666665,16.169934777777787,12.38722222222222,14.267500000000013,90.11111111111113,15.133333333333335,60.05555555555557,10.125756701596842,12.442955555555557,59,5,3,3,2,20,7,9,0.205,0.795,0.0,-0.264,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4163128371618097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9092214370626578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,codejx,2020/03/26,"Bi polar ex had been lying to me This is gonna be long.

I have bpd. I’m very self aware of it and the symptoms it causes and have gone to great lengths to work on those skills. I entered into a relationship with a good friend of mine who is bi polar (idk the type). From that moment on our friendship became a war zone. I had to cherish the happy times because at any moment something was gonna go wrong. I eventually left due to the fact she couldn’t communicate with me. 

After leaving I got into contact with an old friend who also had dated her briefly. Through said friend I found out that she hadn’t been completely honest with me during our relationship. She would flip flop between liking me and liking said friend. Would tell my friend one thing and me another. Once my friend was out of the picture she told me she never liked him, didn’t want to touch him, and didn’t wanna be his gf. 

I battled with the thoughts that the relationship ended because of me and my bpd but I’m starting to realize maybe it wasn’t me.",3.9565695792880256,5.164584883495149,4.659203883495144,86.11896763754045,71.52427184466019,7.0467313915857615,25.869255663430422,7.3011,1.1275240129449835,810,25,165,8,15,260,117,206,0.055999999999999994,0.7979999999999999,0.146,0.9285,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,2,0,0,2,1,17,2,0,11,0,20,3,0,1,2,27,34,8,1,5,1,1,1,3,7,4,1,2,0,1,11,15,0,0,3,0,0,3,6,3,0,1,18,3,30,14,28,9,0,22,0,0,0,2,30,8,0,0,14,110,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275899178099356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887873421350654,0.12162802879936555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141564581190938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921764555356743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191560325737415,0.0,0.0,0.12161570839970708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273473991194973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271795581518151,0.537692129512345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592109100609887,0.09728882897940047,0.09276962978512852,0.1278819083518996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234759487407061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281908631773608,0.12602596162451205,0.0,0.0,0.1700039205456311,0.0,0.0,0.10264952589369522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652984494307135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946040414294168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171439553134933,0.1235280024386635,0.07859937707834179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3735969291539537,0.0,0.0,0.22067045802708024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121005254632963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929653111075701,0.0,0.0,0.08209993931773027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056040115210663,0.0,0.0,0.10138237334386964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706012289453171,0.0,0.0,0.092084921174875,0.06763603662845608,0.0,0.0,0.11083560308841237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957057863003128,0.06841525743752443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444376801240032,0.0,0.0,0.16479518855860525,0.1268193594855676,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LostPenguinDesu,2020/03/26,"Quickly losing interest in everything I'm doing Hello, like the title says, I have found myself in the situation where I'm rapidly losing interest in things I'm doing. I was diagnosed with depression and bad anxiety disorder, and I'm dealing with it for the past 7 years. I'm taking my medication regularly as well as talking with my psychiatrist and that combined has help me feel way better, but this problem still remains.  


  


Whether it's anime, any kind of game, drawing, writing or reading, I'm really into it ranging from a few hours a day to a few weeks, but in the end I lose all interest for the certain activity and I get bored of it. Once I lose interest, it doesn't come back for months, even years in some situations, and if by some miracle it comes back it lasts for quite a short time then the same story all over again. If I want to finish something I have to force myself to do it, otherwise it is out of the question. I also can't focus properly even if I'm doing something, my mind keeps wandering around and it's like my body automatically grabs my phone or anything near me after few minutes to entertain myself, and it's hard to be focused on something for longer than 10 minutes. For example; if I'm watching a youtube video, I cannot be still and watch it in one sitting no matter how long it is, I automatically open new tab, start searching for a new video, I start to fiddle with pens on my desk etc. I don't know whether it's worth mentioning, but the only remaining thing that I'm really interested in and makes me happy is skincare, and it has been that way for the past 2 years.   


  


Unfortunately I cannot speak with my psychiatrist at the moment because mental health workers are currently not working due to whole situation with COVID-19. So I'm unsure what to do in this situation or what all of this really is. If anyone can offer me some advice I would greatly appreciate it!",10.189838709677415,6.9997460483870935,10.513182795698928,63.859774193548404,60.29032258064517,13.683440860215054,42.00430107526881,11.855464076750405,4.862232043010753,1518,64,280,35,15,518,195,372,0.091,0.768,0.141,0.9670000000000001,1,0,3,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,8,14,22,0,0,16,0,25,4,1,2,4,57,47,29,0,8,14,0,3,2,0,1,3,3,0,0,26,22,0,1,4,5,1,2,7,8,1,1,3,8,28,14,49,41,12,53,0,5,2,0,12,19,0,12,31,196,54,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910716142571606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292244041263173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06201048205751247,0.0,0.06975802491064999,0.0,0.0,0.06376027123128153,0.0,0.0750393674827693,0.08117601819494591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14023478998728242,0.07613757569079031,0.055586923742555264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064774503305913,0.0,0.10128851907658178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570995468315217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058808256333635435,0.094010088804201,0.07853947661452093,0.09255317675634774,0.0,0.0,0.104508530917499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08076487039902717,0.0,0.10169792919733414,0.12045668601857967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195325370222177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04610703214307089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998215345987486,0.0,0.0,0.04764159380430087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053430575941028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707056255738948,0.08168589808053026,0.0,0.0,0.09692782189650943,0.0,0.0,0.061120916283473124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980110934559808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105145042587812,0.0,0.0949575270595218,0.050114148142996036,0.07432980945277655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909900469216288,0.0,0.0,0.08069787943621944,0.0,0.4080609970787433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060868222106470526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186159819254587,0.0918953377463716,0.0,0.09207316522553602,0.0,0.07278482244983334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17613849988133395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711148454904413,0.06179086556910784,0.0693520407665676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740971668619929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.087253918479637,0.0,0.0,0.10215063055226978,0.0969889041147614,0.09121196350459053,0.0,0.17525073297330887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725157905562089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40999332442619785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21060128545876955,0.0,0.0,0.1290856620544812,0.0,0.14564457026697775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856149137326405,0.07329288712106488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211615631449326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05317204031745176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05378462441228247,0.14476044789194348,0.07314494124265859,0.0,0.08198832210272335,0.0,0.0,0.10180734937127006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638543092017643,0.0,0.0,0.06477683234379256,0.0,0.0,0.17616486927028685
mentalhealth,MoaiMoaiam,2020/03/26,"help: anxious wife My wife thinks our kids are going to die. She's been anxious about this in particular since our second child was born 18 months ago and with COVID-19 it's a significant problem. She refuses to get professional help because she thinks they'll take our kids away because she's crazy. 

I don't know what to do.",3.4823809523809537,5.927404460317465,3.676428571428573,87.40607142857145,75.82539682539681,6.73968253968254,26.37301587301588,7.793537801064563,1.4688539682539683,263,10,52,4,6,81,47,63,0.191,0.7040000000000001,0.106,-0.7003,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,3,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,7,12,1,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,2,0,10,0,7,9,0,6,0,0,0,0,16,2,0,0,3,28,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183805441551296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5566263909803371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314604347491884,0.0,0.0,0.30035378214809383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556795869318324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871132204542446,0.0,0.14001031422891574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302556993281507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13539131976065358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19663974217239166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357303000250156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20378898898069808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18522974341093787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31571113217045504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Poptartgrits,2020/03/26,"please read: i dont know how to talk about it so i have been told i am a very kind and sensitive person.. i am happy people think that as it is really important to me that people dont think im mean, selfish, manipulative, or anything else that kinda has to do with that. now, i have been told my a therapist that i dissociate and depersonalize things in my life (was just told this, kinda freaking out because i dont know why i do that?? anyone know causes of this... my psychologist hasnt brought it up really) and recently ive been looking into it. now to get on to what im most concerned about, i was talking to my psychologist and i was describing a situation where i got very very intensly angry (he said it was rage) at my boyfriend.. who didnt do anything to make me mad. in my head i think ""wait but im not mad at him, he didnt do anything wrong"" yet i still get intense feelings and the only thing i can do is push him away. im worried that something is up? ive been trying to find anything online about feeling something as intense as that... yet not feeling angry at all... does anyone relate?? any doctors out there to give me any information...? please. it happened yesterday, i got so angry that i was insulting and purposely starting stuff with him and i dont know why. thats not me?? i feel so terribly about how it makes him feel and im just scared. once i get out of a state like that i feel numb and the only thing i can think is ""what the fuck did you just do"" over and over again.",2.468961038961041,3.9425244415584397,4.27129350649351,86.38279740259745,75.68831168831169,7.265662337662338,25.307012987012982,7.9765259561132025,1.3459429610389608,1160,40,250,18,25,393,136,308,0.156,0.769,0.075,-0.9867,0,0,2,0,0,0,49.0,0,1,0,0,21,14,5,1,7,0,36,5,1,6,1,52,69,20,0,0,8,0,6,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,27,16,0,1,17,1,0,2,10,11,0,0,19,8,38,3,35,50,2,28,0,0,1,1,18,16,1,4,10,174,65,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081816272517668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123425696669624,0.0,0.2618228600351876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473167250584459,0.0,0.0,0.048487640031666016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171082883886227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814138940716603,0.06960713027259856,0.0,0.37288725888198576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664465521374375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24131083646604126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072699309927621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353465290981819,0.1246711436101286,0.07630326571737861,0.0,0.0,0.12723289248701838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033811155160752,0.08467319610548496,0.0,0.0,0.08163232454202772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4295912829677619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283002692653822,0.17485527977083742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056182374623011545,0.03885986285823129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679466152893647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618887479850203,0.0,0.0,0.0866437972964144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470889174516309,0.0,0.12098949039615188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028784862898884,0.06945239772644121,0.0,0.1746249297727767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795628280038499,0.0,0.10191239094348443,0.0,0.07853744077585563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566199392584358,0.0,0.07963472039311634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940775721927775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246956216807002,0.0,0.0,0.05629974365855466,0.0,0.06352178732158849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09105576184226204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278645727569583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235358342562892,0.15853112199518726,0.20386742089530785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22801537104563974,0.0,0.054003323507127464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19688971563652746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354730819419834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077805422081116,0.0,0.0,0.08696592822496302,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SacrificialHummus,2020/03/26,Anyone have any experience with teletherapy? Hi all! I was wondering if any of you out there have any experience with teletherapy? I do behavioral therapy for children and with all of the COVID-19 stuff going on we are now doing online therapy through video chat. I’ve been racking my brain but I’m having a really hard time coming up with ideas/activities to keep children engaged during our online sessions. Any tips or ideas??,5.356753246753247,8.083315324675329,6.016883116883117,71.51675324675327,71.07792207792205,9.594805194805195,31.779220779220786,9.957137785484203,3.8790051948051953,348,16,54,10,7,113,59,77,0.027000000000000003,0.91,0.063,0.5807,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,8,1,1,0,2,16,13,4,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,8,0,1,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,6,1,12,11,2,7,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,3,2,37,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5401341710052064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13884387002762835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22166836860594613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17104937479448595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884766323543004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285118288650565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787857543835112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22415992155244385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649700716706312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720821038610894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.227313683882096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4541612867617454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578702085756015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153393127482687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brando444,2020/03/26,"Anyone in the military with anxiety and depression? So in short, I’m not happy at my job right now for multiple reasons. I’m looking for a career change. I’ve been tossing around the idea of enlisting in the military, at least in the reserves. For background, I’m a 31 year old Canadian man. 

Thing is, I have an anxiety disorder, get anxious when I travel and have major life changes, and I also have some light depression, which manifests itself as numbness, lack of interest in things etc. I’m not like sad or suicidal. I’m on escitalopram as well as Wellbutrin.

If you’re also dealing with similar things, and you’re in the military, how did you get through basic training? I’m worried it’ll be just such a drastic change in my life. I feel like I’ll just have a panic attack and quit. I’m also nervous I’m not physically fit enough. 

I’ve already got military-ish experience. I’ve spent my teenage years in the air cadets, and currently and regularly in a military/paramilitary environment, as I’m a paramilitary musician, so drill and deportment aren’t new for me. 

Can someone offer up some constructive advice?",4.298653039832285,6.454554033018869,5.979748427672956,73.16829140461216,72.34905660377359,9.994129979035641,33.47589098532495,10.25414643259724,4.07334821802935,893,46,155,28,18,305,124,212,0.209,0.7559999999999999,0.035,-0.9865,3,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,0,1,13,12,1,2,13,0,11,3,0,2,0,25,26,21,1,2,7,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,6,11,0,0,3,1,1,1,4,7,1,0,4,3,9,5,27,20,7,26,0,3,1,0,4,18,0,4,9,96,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824071553937388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482039970673632,0.3148442545279328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007878802561314,0.1482574929991866,0.0,0.09176212859726826,0.0,0.0,0.11682641991278585,0.0,0.14929805082638228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4164857132729181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352968814545978,0.22606395530914866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15040596704454104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13560019385380145,0.14636102194783732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12837240379440434,0.0,0.0,0.0663560447759691,0.09375386601668473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13712909223335526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049601207449226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970143590026435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14814763909818876,0.0,0.0,0.13022987057888408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853894447858892,0.12822897658000645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020382547553446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674698025054199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770840393515962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15397526680566315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958391518762012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13493079785699735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207344194078296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119446278756727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354910956268208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26155886864146605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799546662802265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327488134283055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902127376114576
mentalhealth,CHTIBemanresumodnar,2020/03/26,"Current events have destroyed my mental health... What can I do? Nobody in my household is doing anything to protect from covid.
I'm on a sap appeal for college and I'm failing because everything moved to online.
I can't focus on my classes or anything because I genuinely feel like the world is ending.
I have GAD and this has not helped.",2.7774725274725296,5.436869999999999,3.825274725274728,84.17615384615384,79.76923076923076,4.945054945054945,29.285714285714285,6.1826913282559595,1.6031098901098906,270,13,45,2,7,87,50,65,0.10099999999999999,0.82,0.079,-0.34,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,2,0,9,1,0,0,0,5,12,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,1,7,1,7,12,0,8,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,1,4,31,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5075171229471779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3759535368922688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731203369319982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771390600051523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559188802214889,0.2202964003522239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3277781446768501,0.0,0.0,0.20669091854489885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065182462127946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.310759931685238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3277437633732912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,okcomput3r,2020/03/26,"Has cannabis revived my anxiety and panic disorder? When I was about 11 or 12, somewhat ambiguously, I developed a panic disorder. The trigger of my panic attacks came from health anxiety, and feeling anxious before flying on an aeroplane, but then I started getting anxious about being anxious.....and you guys know where it goes from there. However, over several months, it just seemed to go. Don't get me wrong, I still experienced anxiety, but I would describe it as a perfectly normal amount, and it was certainly manageable.

Fast forward 10 years to now, I'm 21. Since I was 18, I became a very casual weed smoker. If someone else was smoking, I'd occassionally share a joint. At the start of February this year, we made a batch of weed brownies. I ate half and 3 hours later I was feeling pretty high, and pretty good. However, I decided to eat another half, and 45 minutes later it triggered a sever panic attack. So severe I ended up calling 999 believing I was going to die. Since then, I have experienced a constant level of extreme anxiety and frequent panic attacks to the point where it is ruining my life.

They say trauma is likely to be the cause of the onset of an an anxiety disorder. Could eating too much weed brownie really have caused me this much trauma? Whenever I ingest anything now, even ibuprofen, it's enough to cause a debilitating panic attack. All of my symptoms I had as a child have returned. Has anyone else experienced something similar?",5.814738805970148,7.638749055970153,7.0718208955223885,68.22802985074628,67.76865671641791,9.837611940298508,35.414925373134324,10.125756701596842,4.214994925373134,1169,59,178,30,20,396,163,268,0.23800000000000002,0.655,0.107,-0.9887,2,0,2,0,0,0,42.0,1,1,1,1,13,20,4,6,17,0,19,8,0,6,3,33,33,17,1,4,5,0,2,1,0,1,5,1,0,2,9,9,4,0,5,1,0,4,1,14,0,2,10,6,24,6,24,19,6,32,0,1,0,0,8,10,0,5,21,124,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778796780477598,0.283751236577998,0.25141904132944376,0.0,0.05187089465218664,0.07600985994368936,0.061046778037478135,0.0,0.0,0.3375781963463575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312477567642598,0.08357950833855034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574974497179837,0.08484627022890423,0.0,0.22862096139568594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801661122584933,0.0,0.05922956443176621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699085978860852,0.0,0.2550624813598722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518166757879474,0.123941749598021,0.0,0.06570464653246494,0.07665148441658985,0.0,0.048997565019420986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750189094504623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751573340462055,0.0,0.08432049348258246,0.0622216800775237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345342242415025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885369276774792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837904134194462,0.0,0.0,0.0730558981723671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04076936387990291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052398067193498515,0.03624235748023631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019431150833348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059212637974493935,0.0,0.10906695636288967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268417267479242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5222307916529729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012747576676569,0.0,0.0,0.15094277170305956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04752391069564717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0589937724530213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06753395897316038,0.0,0.25141904132944376,0.0,0.12273087316320133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285551951910685,0.057110155904771,0.0,0.0,0.105015061075379,0.0,0.05924311499223176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710515985440246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06120923521452595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0526978976331385,0.08110811586824881,0.0,0.09554360627052616
mentalhealth,sally-flow,2020/03/26,"Brain Zaps So I recently stopped taking my SSRI meds. I didn’t immediately stopped taking them but rather decreased its dosage(as my doctor instructed). It’s been five days and day by day those brain zaps are getting more intense with nausea and dizziness. My doctor told me it’s alright but it really isn’t, I’m suffering and i can barely get out of my bed. Can you guys recommend something that can help?",2.133376623376624,5.019079740259741,3.0776623376623387,85.46506493506496,89.25974025974025,5.916883116883117,25.181818181818183,7.348242739294969,1.698257142857143,328,14,58,6,11,104,56,77,0.095,0.7659999999999999,0.138,0.537,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,7,4,2,0,0,10,13,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,6,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,10,1,4,10,1,7,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,6,36,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4499454274621536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3899080789794672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4125463920647723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21058088866943184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995451283308986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508046057541626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22385298912094506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12910446573597875,0.0,0.1989853095932328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15514666319030934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369740865228316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030490508187019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19256933912163196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SeventhHokage_,2020/03/26,"I need help. I'm struggling with Depression, Anxiety, and Possibly ADHD. Ever since I remember as a kid I always felt something was off with me. I just couldn't put my finger on it. As a kid, I was raised to learn that lying, procrastination, constantly depending on others, and laziness were ok. I missed out on a lot as a kid including tons of school. Not to mention that my mother was on hard drugs when she gave me birth and there were entire summers where we had no power and food. When I moved out to my Dad's about 6 years things got good. (Mom left for a whole day and had no way of communicating with her. I called the police and long story short I ended up with Dad.) I started to get friends, got involved in sports, and really got happy. But something still felt off. There would be days where I had no energy, felt confused in conversation and felt scatterbrained. The symptoms only got worse over time. It also didn't help that this was a big change for me and I had little time to adjust to my new life. ( I started seventh-grade months after I moved in.) They hit their peak going into my senior year of HS. I couldn't keep up with my fall sport, soccer. I was struggling with my emotions and to stay happy and determined. And of course the stress of picking which college I wanted to go to. Fast forward to last year of August and I'm 2 weeks away from leaving for college. I start to look into why I'm so lazy and why I get nervous over small things. Then I see all the possibilities of having a mental illness. I knew it would become a problem if I didn't address it then and there but I put it off because I was just so excited to start a new chapter of my life. It only became more and more apparent throughout the semester that I needed help. Finally reached out to my stepmom and told her I needed help. Soon after I got a counselor that I would see once a week. It helped that I finally had someone to help. Soon after though 'it' happened. The winter came up fast and as it did it felt harder and harder to get up in the morning. Things I found interesting weren't interesting anymore. I barely had enough to go to our cafeterias and eat something. My grades suffered the most. I barely had any focus in class. Random hot flashes and cold shivers. Everything fell apart. I also forgot to mention that I joined a frat and that made it very hard to balance school with having fun. Drinking a ton on the weekends only worsened my depression. We go on winter vacation and when I get back I realize I haven't registered for any classes and forgot to submit my FAFSA. So now I couldn't take out a loan to pay for the last semester's bills and had to go home for a semester. And now here I am. I owe the school over 10k in money, have no job as of now and want to return to school this August. I had a plan before I left to get a job, find a counselor at home, get prescribed medicine, get my driver's license, and come back to school. That was almost 2 months ago. Living with these illnesses makes everyday living a challenge. I can't sit still, am unmotivated and undetermined for most of the day, haven't really done anything productive since I got home, and a handful of other things I'm forgetting to mention. I've changed a lot and I know that being self-aware is a gift that I have. My life has gotten 100x because of it. But being self-aware isn't enough anymore. Because of the virus, I can't see any psychiatrist to get prescribed medicine. People of Reddit, what kind of solutions did you find to your mental problems? How are your lives now? Are there any at-home solutions I can try until I get this medicine or is there any way to get prescribed online or through email? If you read this far thank you. Be safe everyone and god-bless.",3.3669122753043546,5.102218827077749,4.411947875005495,85.21320199534131,73.86595174262735,7.090194699600054,25.63433393398673,7.81261533590308,1.4163421351030636,2959,100,583,41,61,963,324,746,0.084,0.8290000000000001,0.087,0.7713,5,0,5,0,0,0,84.0,3,5,2,3,32,24,0,5,35,1,51,13,2,5,2,107,113,57,0,15,10,4,10,0,1,3,7,0,4,3,36,50,4,4,14,6,5,14,16,11,0,0,44,15,79,13,102,58,12,116,0,4,4,0,36,41,0,13,59,392,115,20,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321440562577779,0.0,0.04662630392040911,0.0,0.052670824812588536,0.0,0.0,0.08412763989892176,0.043767017222582284,0.0,0.0,0.17884739851593398,0.0,0.04023849151602594,0.0,0.1043291868221082,0.0,0.0,0.043284926081133664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04941898381066096,0.08089157361296576,0.0,0.09619254396673607,0.05809204118514862,0.044758320371384455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370999448580346,0.06015984222563444,0.0,0.0,0.1112866428571308,0.04530983202612583,0.0,0.056841398594213034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176702364713863,0.0,0.09060778505338764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053827574718041615,0.0,0.05152750819475169,0.060998748031295916,0.05382244403898275,0.0,0.05916738424952921,0.04658756546657949,0.10869873705519224,0.0,0.0,0.0475792803968337,0.0,0.05026109881949119,0.04727306009640354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525189563951438,0.11524041392763805,0.09615002313987678,0.0,0.0636035526195793,0.05767266259189865,0.04063826138719025,0.0,0.27481080070138875,0.0,0.14946760684395116,0.04411798475500378,0.2524118640663815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04651358492972983,0.11198634172697323,0.09423768293619107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21153811116135413,0.0,0.15828483235887156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043938216935594,0.046752873300249874,0.0,0.05477430950577308,0.028907322526228088,0.0857512640555495,0.0,0.055695300628365765,0.11429907240146076,0.0,0.11145779702930997,0.0,0.05271854095041442,0.13933902878910198,0.04654892309830656,0.044170352222197784,0.0,0.0,0.08943646782755635,0.0,0.04977094095103531,0.035110590386753765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10601589632177724,0.0,0.0,0.0616039262181884,0.08396887567830033,0.11180993846106728,0.0,0.11700564059568284,0.0,0.10160189515398008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05601677587833795,0.0,0.12001292357025592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03646588670608415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859611907398013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066128056176864,0.0,0.10575409843238212,0.0,0.0,0.052613757690825866,0.0,0.06739320330008569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059585006475638184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661676297471986,0.12574503046918328,0.0,0.1097455491072416,0.0,0.0,0.08702173879644799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0445674055804467,0.12148104894098115,0.0,0.0,0.14892085388234175,0.05606409347529332,0.08401209484571143,0.0,0.06025257646861469,0.1099768851129701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054671044927593664,0.03954829559011757,0.0,0.0,0.04842657428168276,0.0,0.0,0.1397791447484485,0.0,0.05167876478890798,0.0,0.061342410308894035,0.0,0.0,0.05026109881949119,0.0,0.035711623741752845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04340011556575391,0.0620491235489627,0.08350210691625796,0.0843843300151575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949257772754684,0.05872548956470688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05360340816250216,0.11209557704820247,0.0,0.0,0.10161710579727197
mentalhealth,starrrrrynight,2020/03/26,"How do you induce sleep naturally? (W/o pills and stuff) I've (26/f) had a really bad fight with bf(27/m) and haven't slept a wink in about a week and I can't even close my eyes for 2 minutes cause of the pictures I've seen of him with his exes. I get crazy flashbacks and the heartache resumes. 
I really need to put my mind to rest but I can't meditate or let go of the hurt and pain.
Please help, I'll go mad.",-1.1215513833992077,0.7936849673913073,1.3957312252964442,99.95243083003952,90.63043478260867,5.084584980237153,15.972332015810276,6.574015621080383,-0.5630130434782612,315,7,82,4,11,107,67,92,0.209,0.721,0.07,-0.9167,0,0,0,0,1,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,3,5,2,0,6,0,6,5,3,3,0,15,12,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,3,2,9,0,10,8,1,6,0,1,2,0,5,2,0,1,1,42,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093382576255528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575554653381994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655962416828563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098930648908286,0.0,0.28497654550843304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805034837492513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683977789313727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25637516206070154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253152741041567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18590350983079004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667806095708648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752120232189296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25203987573778674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212315141844927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250898106865354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870110295816037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011100880864236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,healthcentraldotcom,2020/03/26,"How are you dealing with your mental health during the Coronavirus outbreak? Everyone is handling the pandemic, I'm sure. How is every one going about thier daily lives and what are you doing to cope with what is happening in the world right now?",6.898666666666667,8.228718422222222,6.780000000000005,73.17000000000003,64.77777777777777,9.555555555555557,30.555555555555557,9.725611199111238,3.1178888888888885,199,7,31,4,3,63,36,45,0.0,0.9420000000000001,0.057999999999999996,0.3939,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,3,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,0,6,1,0,2,1,6,9,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,5,9,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,24,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476788414980781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841385991383377,0.3222465395721712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916608280156364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982195403354189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3584695350740327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29778842159085794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3398578277409876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285220323637316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880004626695656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178439864058874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cherrybxmber,2020/03/26,"Help me understand my diagnosis Hi, I was involuntarily hospitalized in February and I just recently accidentally found my medical records and they told me I just had depression, but according to the paper it says “principal diagnosis upon discharge: F33.3 MDD with psychotic features” and I searched about this F33.3 everywhere and the only info it gives is “major depressive disorder, recurrent, severe, with psychotic symptoms” and I just wanted to ask if anyone else who has this or knows about this can help me understand what’s truly going on.",10.705652173913043,11.223509565217396,10.953391304347827,49.30465217391307,56.60869565217391,15.62086956521739,44.48695652173913,14.265292616868653,7.4485452173913025,448,24,60,19,5,151,67,92,0.142,0.767,0.091,-0.631,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,0,0,19,14,8,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,7,7,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,1,11,0,9,10,1,5,0,2,0,0,9,3,0,2,1,45,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14551644028035424,0.21323488479194166,0.0,0.0,0.19455621385773372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35849236013977664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23851387555865225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17385050252707318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281835817521924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19963956989047532,0.1182745944189239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789855812244725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143726697616894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096505003712297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582782178250481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20548505688950414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654986640125551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351068240887933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163075933911492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19885951221963213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4333029429265646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12274958897055928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisismycallforhelp3,2020/03/26,"I’m trying to get better, but still need help I’m not sure how long this will be, or if I’ll even post it. So I apologize. But I’m trying. 
Also I’m sorry if this is a bit all over the place, but I hope it’s understandable because of the state I’m in. Also I’m on mobile, sorry if the formatting is bad.

I’ve recently been in the worst slump of my life, and after checking this sub and seeing the “Suicidal Scale” posted on here, I’m realizing how bad it’s truly gotten. I would place myself somewhere in a weird mix of 6, 7, and 8, bouncing from one to the other depending on day, time, whatever.
I’ve always hid my emotions because I’ve ALWAYS been the funny guy, class clown, whatever. I put a facade so people don’t worry, because I worry for other people, but hate seeing them feel the way I do for them. 
I can trace the bad feelings back as far as 9th grade. But being a Junior in college and turning 21 soon, it’s all coming crashing down at once. 
The feelings I’m talking about are feeling like a secondary option, less sometimes feeling like I’m not even a consideration. After dealing with friends poking fun at me and just getting made fun of in middle school in high school I’ve become to numb to the insults that I thought it wasn’t affecting me anymore. But it does. 
In college I made friends, built relationships and felt I was taking all the right steps, until this school year. I started falling down victim to my own mind, overthinking things as I always do, and when I tried to talk to my close friends about it, I got ghosted. Even when I’ve been there for them in hard times, saying the things like “it’s not the first step that counts, it’s the next step” and being there for them in their struggles, nobody has been there for me.
This shoved me deeper and deeper as I kept trying and trying to ask for help, but nobody has been there.
February I was at my worst point. Skipping 3 weeks of classes, missing 3 tests and a lab report, essentially ruining my academic semester. Simply because I couldn’t find the strength to leave my house anymore. Until I made a Hail Mary call to a friend from Freshman year, and she invited me over. I’ve been fighting back since then. But it’s still so hard.
I was so prepared to take the steps I needed to take when I came back from spring break, but then all of this corona virus stuff happened, and I’m back to being alone with my thoughts and I’m scared.

I’ve been trying to talk to my parents, but I’m still scarred from my childhood, even though we have a much better relationship now. But each time I try to ease us into a talk, it always gets brushed off by them, so I just go back to my slump. 
I don’t know what to do. I don’t know how to get better because every time I get motivated to, it feels like something is blocking me.
I’m scared of myself. I’m scared of my thoughts. I don’t know what to do or where to go next.

Im stopping typing here, because I just can’t type more. Again, I’m sorry if this post is all over the place or not properly formatted, but I just don’t know what to do.",3.995386192754616,4.639479861244023,4.968028024606976,86.03369617224882,70.96172248803828,7.438733196627933,26.730804283435866,7.35660576581511,1.2435292321713374,2391,74,502,23,42,783,264,627,0.151,0.7190000000000001,0.13,-0.9101,1,1,1,0,2,0,73.0,2,0,6,6,42,33,4,4,29,0,38,2,0,9,6,92,97,55,2,9,27,1,9,4,4,2,2,1,0,1,29,22,0,3,19,0,1,10,12,17,0,2,22,13,58,16,76,68,13,85,0,2,2,0,30,32,0,10,41,323,87,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06055059981459439,0.0,0.09350654989456256,0.1945854078196729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596025188346727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05465552156309587,0.0,0.0,0.22477428266079907,0.14644385143784955,0.2138330023929696,0.06456839100778937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15511876081244175,0.06382704803108767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059697814954248224,0.0668667193740258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050361166367624256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0377041492574676,0.06027334665173634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0511618412597099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576361792755185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445847749465744,0.0,0.0492580572611533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17736554662106918,0.12529910236534975,0.05613417046729256,0.0,0.053434619982768966,0.04972906058878406,0.0,0.0,0.1806751560174593,0.0,0.15272394351145013,0.0,0.0664523586006549,0.0,0.04675863681595475,0.0,0.0,0.057888100102062225,0.051699118806047696,0.0,0.10474370387673096,0.0577206458721097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837376225648046,0.06176994401848871,0.0,0.05806749061158387,0.0,0.06745908021333509,0.0,0.0,0.06315065982372167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12852013912976076,0.0,0.0,0.06190445153764136,0.0,0.0,0.04129453004023066,0.11424933779863496,0.0,0.0,0.0517383966251708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16595885652785172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05903151327215145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04297743167979588,0.0866999540495901,0.0,0.0,0.12435328441809615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062261766226814924,0.03961641040585048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06491684682469277,0.0,0.0,0.08106252020926183,0.0,0.18324588018341484,0.0,0.05526694608795743,0.0,0.16797574276580274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05877200937470231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05772569652250066,0.12553593359038465,0.0,0.04992754706483665,0.0,0.04649255667678693,0.1755966195226641,0.1775046829877337,0.0931757504009149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048361647672859207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045008092376820366,0.057821939841812615,0.19633545279917095,0.041380797293912086,0.0,0.14006718507512633,0.048878140537931936,0.0,0.061118789897232774,0.06692677050341853,0.06394962802688893,0.0,0.05510119825315202,0.0,0.13187192744092302,0.18796312815979885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768116155608211,0.0,0.057440135061786274,0.1392405702840922,0.13636225043500466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778503606977805,0.06359154755129101,0.0,0.0608626110441097,0.07032444490457701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04640563990650025,0.046895928462761305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187451334691864,0.0,0.041530824196863686,0.0,0.0,0.07529721095857057
mentalhealth,_Kyrus16,2020/03/26,"Is Euthymia good? I just found this term and it describes my mood perfectly. No highs no lows, i have trouble getting excited for anything and when it happens it doesnt last.
So that makes me think its not good for me but the things ive read about euthymia desribe it as a normal state for people with bipolar disorders.
Thanks in advance.

Edit: Forgot to mention how hard it is for me to care about anything.",1.5374913693901036,4.268708594936712,2.147617951668586,92.45684695051789,89.63291139240508,4.391714614499425,26.16915995397008,6.1124844417494595,0.9983316455696204,325,15,61,3,11,100,60,79,0.092,0.721,0.187,0.8834,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,6,9,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,2,1,13,13,7,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,3,0,1,2,1,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,1,7,6,11,11,1,8,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,43,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39566807770246615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451104159383932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27552663967437235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635932830397688,0.0,0.0,0.12560245689409552,0.0,0.0,0.40328307797960017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21259064531726451,0.0,0.21535697429981987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540026322182824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19596335769303933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604731838895369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355472950920808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16666757461555476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404715249739799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213339757105492,0.0,0.0,0.15971537470644814,0.15404275723091032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blllaaah,2020/03/26,"I’m struggling with seeking help in the middle of this pandemic I was brutally sexually assaulted and then immediately left town and made a new life in a different town. I had a little freak out and had my mom come rescue me and take me back to her house .I want to see a therapist, I want to see a psychiatrist but right now there’s nothing I can do because of the carona virus. So now I’m locked down in my moms house in what feels like one long constant panic attack . I snuck a few of my moms Xanax last night and took all three and it did make me feel better but I also drank with it and I’m pretty sure I blacked out. I need new coping mechanisms and I just need help in general because I feel like I’m loosing my mind.",3.2035645933014365,4.184818973684212,4.7043540669856485,85.94638755980861,73.07894736842105,8.158851674641149,25.660287081339717,8.575989854853784,1.5336894736842113,572,18,126,10,11,192,93,152,0.107,0.721,0.172,0.8572,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,7,10,3,2,8,0,6,3,0,2,2,29,25,13,0,4,3,3,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,13,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,6,0,2,7,6,19,4,16,18,2,26,0,0,3,0,6,14,0,0,12,75,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372216209050236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14755406590628656,0.0,0.09973237000491884,0.0,0.15812953823029174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471034753114867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172627087491828,0.0,0.14016113528261193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13551035664155953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196742773598696,0.1853174110261125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17387222780811576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993160012963165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572395137343166,0.0,0.0,0.14092094974567712,0.0,0.09161193398994162,0.12673110436910331,0.12999487579120245,0.0,0.1147816568381532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272659998361066,0.08657669112229029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13096143949201106,0.4557141335445578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19234388815138226,0.0,0.25053283916023456,0.0,0.12171597694729595,0.0,0.12445199061058378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788902480506199,0.0,0.0,0.15217664624839236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13195295149393696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076428625116687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20671044535137686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13559206364996626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224203380487855,0.0,0.0975193106695924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15059332122031555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410302685859913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15300249140595712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,H10Com7,2020/03/26,"My rotting mental health has cost me everything and I refuse to try to fix it. I'll keep this simple, I'm fucked in the head and it continues to ruin my life but I refuse to get help.

And by fucked I mean depressed, lonely, bordering on bipolar. For the last 3 years I've always felt terrible about myself, thinking I'm not good enough and I won't be no matter what I do. 

Luckily I met this amazing person I was even luckier enough to date until about 6 months ago. I won't go into too much detail but because I felt so awful and paranoid I never felt enough for this person and I was so paranoid I thought they were seeing someone else behind my back.

Obviously this made us grow distant and eventually we ended things about 6 months ago. They asked to meet me last month, so I traveled immediately after work and thought maybe we were trying it again, but it wasn't. If felt like an execution and I was not prepared for them not looking at me the same way they used to. Honestly it broke me.

Their exact words when I met them were ""my mind is screwed up and I need time to fix it. But honestly yours is completely fucked, please get help"". 

This isn't a one off. I've contemplated killing myself so long that when people get too close to me I distance myself, try to make myself less important and prevalent in their lives so that my suicide isn't as impactful. They don't need the hassle. 

Came close to ending it a month or so back. Got drunk, put a bag over my head and let myself fall asleep so I couldn't wake up. I stopped myself because I really am that much of a coward. 

My suicide feels like more of a when than an if at this point, I guess this is a note of sorts for when it does happen. This isn't a cry for help or attention, I just needed to document this somewhere, even a throwaway account on a subreddit. 

I don't see anything improving in my life, if anything it's set to get worse. At least twice a day I think just end it, anyway you can, no more pain. 

Why don't I get help? I guess cause this rotten, toxic, disturbed psychology is all I know, it's not just part of me it is me. I don't trust therapists and medication would be taking away the only part of me Im really comfortable in. I know it's weird to be comfortable with something this poisonous but that's what it does I guess. 

I guess what I want to say is if you're feeling even remotely similar and you're with someone special, for fuck sake let them know. And show them what they mean to you, it's the worst mistake I've ever made and it's probably the final straw.",2.1781914893617014,4.074636021072799,3.61581886361784,88.92064196625094,77.67816091954023,6.741403766202005,23.175348495964784,7.69321558396912,1.0033090731230132,2001,63,424,30,47,658,241,522,0.22899999999999998,0.664,0.107,-0.9977,0,2,1,0,0,3,50.0,3,3,11,1,27,28,7,1,19,1,33,17,4,5,5,88,83,40,3,11,18,0,6,2,0,3,7,1,0,2,36,24,1,4,16,3,2,6,18,18,0,2,19,11,71,10,53,55,14,56,0,4,3,5,30,18,5,11,32,286,107,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206909073603728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057291695324048174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332126128461545,0.0,0.064368803894518,0.0,0.06469020608156968,0.10588830776719343,0.0,0.08394500807705409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875015411732235,0.0,0.07073159450925535,0.0,0.0,0.07219166991952672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756324258598507,0.04440486377504978,0.0,0.059303488616390274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205084658510461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05751833201437347,0.0,0.18295150841738875,0.21343246538154664,0.0,0.13643142307527542,0.062282006159341013,0.0,0.0,0.06188115909989756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962887897133266,0.04918901218427045,0.2644409426351785,0.07542573269481187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25461610540033364,0.17986577181478713,0.0,0.03913107694119911,0.0577511171949485,0.05506849879945956,0.0,0.3033999293600203,0.0,0.0608869944842472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14132727718969093,0.07318813710286927,0.0,0.0,0.1846044164939156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437368305615538,0.0,0.0,0.061200226623159076,0.07617628611797575,0.0,0.11352038269257275,0.11224971692582447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081490354949686,0.09726664132213353,0.0672767637149808,0.0,0.06079897367718469,0.060933252687704664,0.057819667010900376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303018467288491,0.045960300124072935,0.0,0.06917267689018451,0.1500034701446416,0.0,0.06936273931939915,0.06938821533900706,0.0,0.06952248908694746,0.0,0.21983308652717115,0.0,0.10123060918898047,0.15316217411188332,0.0531041265288577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04665696858230636,0.052366251182315235,0.07326506496113439,0.0,0.0,0.14912343746692136,0.0,0.047734403746579286,0.12024058263733475,0.0,0.0755805558419496,0.06508888970124986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423580606736697,0.0,0.0,0.06921686661721246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821873445805592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05475513136999414,0.0,0.0,0.10973477946518607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166788318661478,0.05300685070812815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057564676962834176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15062928494198494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05176932414679938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994431469077758,0.045743259889391034,0.08823718932561121,0.0,0.10932410494495336,0.04014907691775022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14024118595067708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282238049503934,0.05946738715334088,0.0,0.0,0.04061162614089666,0.054652767905485435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06212964756550204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050126227173520096,0.0,0.07016768159362079,0.04891160859602267,0.0,0.0,0.044339448855145486
mentalhealth,BadAtEnglishSorry,2020/03/26,"Watching gore Hi. I am 15 almost 16 and I have been watching gore for almost three years now. And I am really not sure why I watch it. I never played Cod, GTA or any other 18+ video games when I was a kid. The first time I watched gore was when I saw a video on a website which started all okay with some goofy music and then boom, a video of someone being beheaded. I thought it was kind of fascinating and gross at the same time. After that, I started to watch more and more gore and at some point,  I became very depressed. When I had nothing to do watched videos of gore. The only thing that I thought was funny was gore memes. I recovered from my depression after almost one year but I still watched gore. I really don't know the reason why. I have never had any violent thoughts against anyone. I am just wondering how does this affect my mental health? Because I am certain that this can't be good for me but I don't really know the damage it does either, does anyone have an answer?",2.3768055555555563,4.320763425000003,3.4933333333333323,89.80722222222224,77.25,6.2444444444444445,22.61111111111111,7.1686216300943375,0.7290777777777779,775,23,160,9,18,250,112,200,0.095,0.84,0.065,-0.6835,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,7,11,1,0,10,1,21,1,0,3,5,34,30,14,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,11,7,0,0,8,6,0,0,6,5,0,3,12,9,23,6,15,16,7,21,0,3,8,0,3,4,0,7,17,110,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3965013845131932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951301979282738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457845273516052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045878866709133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273625063411799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465113200395909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226910528542924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070544967752301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14029729678964648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744541139596553,0.14507453851351676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301307324488418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203594891065536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664624868698476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943862800192008,0.10038298247105447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12477152223849695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25366508413664074,0.13570586403935445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183318329571504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18684387089479973,0.0,0.10540595620916636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439732733321865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876871028949339,0.0,0.0,0.31435169014139197,0.1539267751068122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890409742068556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381976628721064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313558514401487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999216161975028
mentalhealth,mrroboto36,2020/03/26,"My sister isn't himself. Hi! A lot going on right now in the world. Going to keep this short but want someone elses perspective.

I'm really worried about my sister. Shes in her 40s, successful, lives away from family and has a family of her own. In Jan she lost her close friend to suicide. He was in his 40s, and she feels a lot of guilt for what happened (they had planned to meet up the night he died but she couldn't make it). No issues previously.

She seemed shocked by this of course. Then the virus started getting more serious and she became obsessive over every detail of it. Symptoms, things to do/how to help. Then early this week I get a call from her being extremely angry, shouting, she even made me cry because my parents were still going to work and not isolating (they're at risk). 

She called all of my family angry. Finally my mum got her on the phone and calmed her down but the anger was nothing I have ever heard before.
Then called later and she was talking very low, slow, sad sounding and said sorry for it all. But again was sending links to sites about the virus, said she felt she had to save everyone in the world, thought of volunteering with police.

I was worried for her mental state 

Now she is posting incoherent facebook statuses, naming celebs, cant tell if shes being sarcastic but asked for a billion likes. They're not totally incoherent (very good writing) but make no sense to me at all. Almost like drunk thoughts but shes not drinking. Is asking everyone who likes to share the status and thanks for helping the cause...what is going on? Is this delayed grief? Is it some king of breakdown? Would like your thoughts. 

Will delete this soon",3.1743352426891747,5.59395314641745,3.6670786855592414,87.21455833584568,76.72585669781931,6.634147321877197,24.373530298462466,7.717688229018142,1.313058004220682,1324,45,252,20,31,414,186,321,0.19,0.679,0.131,-0.9751,3,0,1,0,0,1,46.0,0,1,1,5,9,21,1,3,14,0,25,3,0,3,5,48,53,19,3,4,11,4,2,4,1,2,1,5,0,0,12,10,2,2,7,2,0,5,8,10,0,1,18,7,35,11,42,30,9,45,0,4,0,0,52,21,0,6,21,166,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038361131417762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19388268016013915,0.0,0.09742538136765523,0.0,0.0,0.06321184396526389,0.0,0.08823727432892152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3176542469640117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390469098004875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761960804122132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015821603299682,0.0,0.0,0.08662432494133399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848993188077819,0.0937985603997819,0.08736797205611592,0.1981710809435944,0.0,0.0,0.2932648036855524,0.0,0.05243158507974716,0.0,0.09956398829897413,0.11359340490368965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011492362802017,0.0,0.10835328854539396,0.0,0.2357302797592744,0.08697490637193976,0.08293480299191887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169763117585927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900988084962362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823121179933644,0.0,0.09216936812706976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20264162874512812,0.0,0.09156506921299368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131959407070942,0.1763164944803257,0.0,0.09811923534808946,0.13843516781237775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450072354537963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731124784121152,0.0,0.0994986755755379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151416351903872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993116714710669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066430023715728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855543192993827,0.1972764255392792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440053292194564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786090183232997,0.0,0.0,0.11607867698909202,0.07339624302409327,0.0,0.08281139906880644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342609971056387,0.0,0.0,0.10777937932204093,0.0,0.08334655405500735,0.090634480051303,0.09546892922359602,0.0,0.0,0.06889071483408626,0.0,0.0,0.2469680480730633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17111937495897026,0.0611623212290977,0.0,0.08317831427573058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549159439597541,0.2106157262299778,0.0,0.07366234256178407,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway4567987654,2020/03/26,"Can i actually do more harm than good by trying to help her ? Throwaway because privacy and shit. Also, sorry for my perhaps ""less-than-ideal"" english, it's not my first language.
Also², i posted this on r/depression a few hours ago but received no answers. Not sure what the ideal place is for this anyway.

So, a ""friend"" of mine is currently having a lot of depression issues, and she's been depressed for a long time (along with some PTSD). She already has quite a few suicide attempts behind her, and i'm quite worried that there will be another one soon if i don't do anything. We live in a quarantined country (France), and the isolation is really starting to take a toll on her, on top of me not being able to help her physically (even if she would let me (more on that later)).

I've been trying to cheer her up these past few weeks, and generally being here for her by telling her that she can talk to me if she ever wants to vent. The problem is... well she doesn't really like me.
She's had some (a lot, actually) problems with people that had the same political opinions as me, and she did told me that i make her uncomfortable because of that.
So at this point, i'm not sure what to actually do. I've always been told that being here for someone and messaging them once in a while is the best way to help someone struggling with depression but... i feel like the best thing here is to... not do anything ?

At this point, i'm kinda lost on what to do. So any advice is welcome on that.
It's 20h here, so i might go to bed in a few hours, but i'll try to read and answer as much as i can. Have a good evening.",4.720779816513762,4.830108685015293,5.798120795107035,82.61406192660553,69.18348623853211,8.741834862385321,29.19403669724771,8.548686976883017,1.9597291743119267,1248,42,263,18,20,416,163,327,0.17300000000000001,0.7070000000000001,0.12,-0.9572,1,2,0,0,0,1,58.0,1,0,1,9,16,22,1,1,17,0,34,1,1,1,3,45,46,23,1,8,11,0,1,2,1,3,0,0,1,0,19,13,0,0,3,1,1,2,8,9,1,2,9,1,34,13,44,29,14,34,0,4,0,0,29,16,1,10,16,201,53,1,0.09566909651855976,0.0,0.2800777133070907,0.0,0.0,0.0934867338854227,0.08480488172072795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557322697101902,0.07650654192159967,0.0796043521949742,0.0,0.0,0.06505826626572804,0.10031738924190066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745502979893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663798653852782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007976289640397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295986105845406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637707194754105,0.08653817496017874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04837316973450274,0.06834602166844844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137608462610632,0.0,0.0,0.07391370665278449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054370952246691945,0.16048539834045444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19237493633515776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842957799764093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09985368115377724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782813296982587,0.0,0.09347817625249108,0.0,0.08447756496498796,0.08466413988802636,0.0,0.0,0.10443412009674416,0.1626688894016255,0.0,0.0,0.0638598648088479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148979294423248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032779376847036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188446549072497,0.06482785573665457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132697781087673,0.06632490566333095,0.0,0.09995384373266668,0.0,0.1808764383896055,0.0,0.09162454908392137,0.0,0.0,0.18308480994911547,0.11183205423601172,0.0,0.0,0.20351172057869452,0.09569498593476283,0.0,0.1225761459540238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982029527744432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16212023004444615,0.0,0.0,0.10709372100823282,0.06771507892197404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001411166902636,0.0,0.1046464638686105,0.0,0.18033398254298288,0.0,0.07193125441599188,0.07689519590065041,0.08361900714334124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06355829671622337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055785419530466576,0.0,0.0,0.18283184306509234,0.0,0.19485910995502626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056428111827467,0.07593767578653382,0.07673997855624487,0.0,0.08601800716679067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971566114030536,0.0,0.06796058128631059,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ethan-B24,2020/03/26,I've made a big mistake need to talk to someone. I have ordered Sodium Nitrite from EBay today for reasons I don't really wish to go into much detail about you may already know what my intentions were it being on this subreddit. Anyways I cancelled my order realising how stupid I was. I have heard police in the U.K where I live can pay people visits and confiscate it and lecture them. But if my order is cancelled before it is shipped I won't get into trouble will I? I haven't been thinking straight at all and have had bad depression for the past 2 years on and off. Need to talk to someone.,4.807920168067226,5.6801286470588295,5.7793172268907576,80.12174894957984,69.25210084033614,7.966806722689077,31.681722689075627,8.07648339933343,2.3494109243697485,475,20,88,6,8,157,84,119,0.188,0.7929999999999999,0.019,-0.9537,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,0,4,5,1,0,3,0,16,0,0,4,1,20,25,7,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,3,0,1,2,3,5,0,0,6,1,14,0,16,15,2,18,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,2,3,65,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464180044172513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864468550128976,0.0,0.0,0.19001254848584395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923286665785936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11666546054326625,0.0,0.12690700033800598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272028926765875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19717871257658404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21129263234576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641517939036925,0.3311494529185304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131658969540884,0.15480867039526006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430522213905608,0.22959043069677576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3784041154125624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3589614766310668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14308214711796402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116630647494742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25678491945534004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14379840501968352
mentalhealth,lowen9981,2020/03/26,"Self Quarantine Anxiety Hello. I have asthma and have been told rather firmly by my doctor to not go out during this time do to the outbreak. I have already had some issues with my asthma due to a bad cold. I understand and want to follow this but I also have severe anxiety and depression. The longer I stay inside, away from people, the harder it gets to maintain. I take medication and see a therapist occasionally (less so recently). Does anyone have ideas for coping or even ways to safely leave the house for short excursions? I am getting so much cabin fever.",4.589047619047619,6.8625048571428575,5.704761904761906,74.94190476190477,71.85714285714286,8.476190476190476,25.0,9.150863307647796,2.3432857142857144,450,14,74,10,9,149,77,105,0.141,0.8079999999999999,0.05,-0.8381,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,6,0,9,5,0,0,0,15,18,9,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,6,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,3,2,9,1,13,15,3,10,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,2,3,55,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20905384161746451,0.1514966147806444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289845061902693,0.0,0.0,0.13246217754612666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798689615469795,0.0,0.1581760691152319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16316602634821364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19390180660748504,0.16578187871396302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512458480715302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979511421522825,0.0,0.1076641944713017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21859051157507212,0.0,0.21385684021553936,0.0,0.1977281195598284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005916132801404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908427786530824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926159009817374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133515685412825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18705101661594312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15096066298352132,0.0,0.19762921195657085,0.21401541856545947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019198537474106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243672851029046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199566410266824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110465092274648,0.0,0.0,0.1810198487787591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972156934522906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173773778829488,0.15037015825076833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trashpanda71199,2020/03/26,"Dissociation non stop so i have been diagnosed with bipolar disorder, psychosis, anxiety & ptsd for a while.

I live life, i don't do much crazy things and i'm medicated. But i find myself noticing that i'm literally floating through life. My dissociation is on high drive, like i feel i'm not there, not real, and not actually living. I'm confused all the time, I basically don't connect with anything and its hard to hang on to anything. The way i can connect is through taking lots of photos of what makes me happy, because i'm scared ill forget everything, as i i already do forget a-lot of things and most of my life.  I've been dealing with this for a very long time, but its starting to wear down..like really bad. Its developed into like a bug biting me and i cant reach it. Its hurting. I don't have access to a therapist atm as i'm moving, and this whole pandemic is putting everything on hold. Does anyone have any coping ideas? Like something to help them feel as if they are alive and actually present? Thanks x",2.772423137050545,4.993854366336635,4.445424700364776,82.12711568525278,77.11881188118812,7.420948410630538,27.46326211568525,8.371475516178862,2.0768079207920795,810,34,157,16,19,272,120,202,0.12300000000000001,0.763,0.114,0.6159,0,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,2,0,2,9,0,2,6,0,16,8,1,1,1,31,28,15,0,1,6,0,3,3,0,0,7,0,0,0,11,11,0,2,4,0,1,4,7,4,0,0,2,3,18,5,23,26,5,17,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,4,10,95,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.25222181114663955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14260972535520666,0.0,0.0,0.14002183595571466,0.0,0.08788157519129614,0.0,0.09886143290574377,0.0,0.0,0.09036138543855213,0.0,0.2126923577090745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790256519450127,0.07877807519708513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332315830140514,0.0,0.13116683974110324,0.0,0.0,0.14811002935664833,0.0,0.11309100090841555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322891481708983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13068624779825927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811487835898167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375689022113505,0.1157656763186376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662087798551832,0.1365397456992793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834455855176034,0.1458861746452716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738392297446489,0.18940735389853366,0.0,0.22822684659701986,0.11436545119702232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21973530891284054,0.0,0.0,0.08626275849378368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301867310314326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13735220075237844,0.09499972333811824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147130456635456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106423283702594,0.12991294296552364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14709327683768156,0.08278874773052858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12938286926999798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099488409536219,0.0,0.0,0.09147043321996556,0.0,0.0,0.10804298085983834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971656994015732,0.0,0.0,0.11897862826932401,0.0,0.15004726018987655,0.17171079257117947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071137988893152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662918641958716,0.0,0.10257762691106444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14428190092926252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Travbuc1,2020/03/26,"Mental Health Professionals: How do you know you’re a fit for a client? Is it beyond the simple they’re paying me I have to help? My counselor is a young guy and I know he’s not a fit for me. I just don’t have the heart to tell him otherwise. I have a complex illness and he’s a novice. My illness may even be misdiagnosed to the point of terribly mistreating an illness I may have. Who knows. But I’m curious, if you know you’re not a good fit.. do you leave the situation and discharge them?",0.7333304195804189,2.836528259615388,2.9607342657342675,90.67517482517485,83.71153846153847,6.4741258741258765,21.954545454545453,7.686295010490155,0.8939730769230771,385,13,87,7,11,131,61,104,0.157,0.7440000000000001,0.099,-0.7046,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,3,1,0,4,2,0,0,12,0,12,5,1,1,0,16,17,6,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,5,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,14,1,7,14,0,6,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,3,1,57,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17057277884931868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21660923091361264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557097352473338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745094270009937,0.0,0.3060294480617962,0.1731006369323577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5677134107507336,0.0,0.0,0.2734512082001765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.260256921235199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24413128306445855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2902856743305224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257233245438912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,namjooni0,2020/03/26,"How to deal with burnout when I can't reduce how much I work or get away? I'm in my last year of university and have two jobs (currently work from home)- I'm working around 25-30 hours a week, with 12 credits in school (four classes + work outside of class). I faced burnout from work and school a bit ago and started recovering recently, but I feel like it's coming back since my entire work and relaxing life are shoved into the same environment. I don't have financial support from my family, and have to pay rent, food, bills, etc. Plus, I'm quite worried about losing hours in the future because of the COVID situation. I need to make sure I have enough for all these expenses, plus savings in case anything happens, and on top of that, I graduate in a month and plan on moving out soon so I can get a full-time job in a different location (need to have security deposit + rent money, moving expenses, etc). So overall, I want to make sure I have enough money to support me presently, and have a bit leftover for the near future.

Now that I have classes online, I'm struggling to focus on ANYTHING, especially without the separation of work and class because of the quarantine situation. I can't leave my apartment and don't even have a separate room to go to. I used to go to the library or a cafe to do work, but that's not an option anymore.

I get uninterested during work, distracted, etc and would rather just relax and do mindless activity than focus on anything. I've been trying to have a schedule of when I do things on my Google calendar, but I always end up distracted during these periods I'm supposed to be doing work and end up having to reschedule, so it's useless (I can't keep these committments to myself). I do take breaks and exercise for at least 30 minutes a day, make sure I eat, and am getting enough sleep. I put my phone across the room, but I end up distracted on my computer. I've tried things like ColdTurkey...and ended up just staring at my screen or messing with something in my apartment instead (cleaning, staring off into space, etc). Somehow I just find a way to avoid doing what I need to do.

I do struggle with anxiety and bouts of depression, so I wonder if this is also affecting my work ethic.

Any tips for dealing with how I can deal with burnout when I can't escape the source? It's becoming quite troublesome because I can't focus on what I need to do.

​

TL;DR: Between work and school, I'm experiencing burnout. I can't afford to drop or reduce the things that are causing it, and am stuck in my apartment 24/7. Struggling to focus on what I need to do. ",7.03915032679739,6.382796980392157,7.5100000000000025,74.86277777777781,64.49019607843138,10.379084967320262,36.1437908496732,9.725611199111238,3.3928888888888897,2060,88,389,36,27,680,231,510,0.121,0.809,0.071,-0.981,8,2,1,0,0,0,76.0,0,0,0,21,23,23,0,7,22,0,39,6,2,9,5,76,71,40,0,9,15,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,6,0,18,31,2,3,3,3,10,6,10,11,0,2,2,5,45,12,79,67,13,72,0,3,3,0,4,37,0,8,28,265,63,29,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054178358313974745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048876889602198915,0.05085595344350342,0.06622247516438044,0.07426634680571001,0.04156305615327652,0.0,0.0467559130376371,0.0,0.060613683596949734,0.0,0.0,0.15088733424939635,0.05440892072741416,0.0,0.0,0.05742336808375125,0.046996783910489184,0.0,0.11177283370045148,0.06750119906333645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345236601146931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278610987162674,0.0,0.0526486576943308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03941673696398966,0.1890331990800973,0.052641756175201546,0.0,0.0,0.06385640838979957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254005600477104,0.0,0.0,0.21653338159787408,0.18945697908541373,0.272655628639072,0.04036856220843788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576176096059071,0.0,0.0309036327801167,0.04366346814186791,0.0,0.0,0.055861712891304593,0.0,0.07390540905295671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12772874345232468,0.0,0.06947073972448672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054047382247841835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06130739977334752,0.0,0.12037992373276328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12130247096431708,0.054325428114409616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049820190742636286,0.0,0.06471625885249167,0.0,0.0,0.043170199055080495,0.059719370215293686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683765936532141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12239233994415558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04878464998519056,0.12991977488388526,0.044929540999385766,0.2265950399932333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0614415357458027,0.0,0.13001528561664238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06034769755320363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855672528619149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050558317400270884,0.13740076677512414,0.06116319870574635,0.0,0.0,0.04705243781933916,0.0,0.0,0.043260384716710114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916847333023512,0.0,0.0,0.13871436829133188,0.17281197009225532,0.0,0.045953926196807084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181436151248662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299165854352182,0.0,0.05970443994265054,0.0,0.0,0.05278724351533825,0.0,0.0,0.036049604687112116,0.04851346437628117,0.04902602268721477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058916592080311775,0.06628101259439106,0.5339448367201619,0.0620693714602478,0.0,0.0434172261012162,0.0,0.07426634680571001,0.03935867029128348
mentalhealth,sleepyxseer,2020/03/26,"I made a stupid mistake & feel like the laughing stock at my workplace. So recently I made a big oopsie that my workplace had to get involved with. It's kinda one of those dumb mistakes where you really don't have anyone else to blame but your self. It's in the works of being cleared up and fixed after being brought to my attention.

The thing is I perpetually feel like the butt of everybody's joke (I'm sure others can relate to this as well and I know it's mostly in my head/ irrational). 

I feel this ESPECIALLY at work. My manager is not the best to say the least. I have to work tomorrow and I'm just absolutely dreading it. My manager is the type that never let's things go and even talks about employees long after they're gone. So I know I'm in for it.

My mental health hasn't been the best lately so I figured venting a little might help?

Hopefully those who also are/ have been in stressful work environments can maybe feel less alone :)

Anyways thanks for reading.",3.188717404487569,5.216825737113403,4.310072771376593,84.48711036992117,75.13402061855669,7.451303820497272,25.32929047907823,8.313332769828598,1.6556243784111584,779,27,153,14,17,254,119,194,0.142,0.7140000000000001,0.145,-0.0861,1,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,0,6,10,16,2,2,11,0,18,3,2,2,3,27,35,10,0,3,3,0,4,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,15,5,0,0,8,2,0,3,4,6,1,1,7,5,17,10,23,24,5,20,0,0,0,1,8,10,2,4,9,106,32,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196960014132318,0.0,0.10961978526863464,0.0,0.14852200225012452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584686416819743,0.14045076280864555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877060237808847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450957341439914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905375353650449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772393756598395,0.1958545251447464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161665535508238,0.0,0.07790356171425478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14067972467252646,0.14570558750816734,0.0,0.0,0.09187928545046233,0.0,0.0,0.13614759306396845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506669861093727,0.0,0.15462792090823194,0.0,0.0,0.14016969869548018,0.0,0.13393701179962308,0.1373863606682307,0.0,0.1213081208661828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594096240534289,0.0,0.0,0.13771146424495934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381405659759154,0.14541618311419213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10572161365604596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928863786911245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711329183069654,0.0,0.08781452187648399,0.0,0.13534620760608046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10900849374179664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430003687465671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570203206058603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291926935036287,0.0,0.0,0.11017665484680747,0.0,0.12620134548958592,0.0,0.0,0.18213466882903376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232479633509269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3991724161318638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,realtechnojesus,2020/03/26,"I don't know anymore I don't know what to do anymore. I either feel like absolute shit or nothing at all. I'm taking meds for my depression three times a day but they aren't helping anymore. My psychiatrist had sme switch to a stronger kind in september and even on the maximum daily dose I don't feel any better. She refuses to up the meds any more, saying I need more therapy but my country's systems regarding mental health are so fucking shit. If you want the therapy to be covered by insurance you can have a maximum of 10 sessions a year with the same doctor and it's nearly impossible to make them more frequent than once every 2-3 weeks. 

Because of the qurantine I don't even have those scarce sessions. I have two close friends but they have nothing left to say at this point and I always feel like a burden to them. So I'm closing myself up and feeling more lonely by the day. 

This is the fourth year I'm on meds now and I no longer have any hopes of a bright future. I just want to let it to consume me...maybe that'll finally give me some peace",3.2178022875816983,4.7094331712963005,4.44307189542484,85.83852941176471,73.76851851851852,7.489760348583879,27.983660130718953,8.124751697461798,1.8067846405228751,839,33,171,13,17,276,126,216,0.111,0.7390000000000001,0.15,0.8303,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,4,1,6,13,3,0,13,0,18,6,2,1,1,30,35,12,0,5,7,0,4,2,1,1,3,2,0,0,7,8,0,1,6,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,1,7,22,7,25,31,8,23,0,2,1,1,13,12,3,4,12,111,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09552477547141347,0.0,0.0,0.2342086621987032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34155933321707754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998246432708267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015333743952976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14807607343292747,0.0,0.09887912031072926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750509890516295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151651776437491,0.0,0.09672595520400533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23219012781668905,0.164029684162296,0.0,0.12576039406211195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869603278692251,0.10613294894750393,0.0,0.11012890228559308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202955985818112,0.0,0.0,0.07694961432399171,0.0,0.0,0.11402466536443255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195490108574498,0.12618476967504658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473312005949146,0.1173932100325564,0.0,0.11217328640682266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766314790497742,0.0,0.11533441961033965,0.0,0.3825586862397257,0.0,0.11569379563879853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512450894204861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22031195666063608,0.0,0.0,0.12226078627194625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085253550139867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18259091829775015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356859833852341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631710123882591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625730496972753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694219007240236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214524227736693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542683443719827,0.0,0.09208754319502133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14785793551604454
mentalhealth,TurkNJD34,2020/03/26,"Need your ideas! Hey y'all. I host a podcast where we talk about Addiction and Mental Health. We'll be talking about Mental Health myths in an upcoming episode and I'd love to hear from you. What are your favorite myths and misconceptions about Mental Health?

Thanks!",2.832448979591838,5.891784897959184,2.0706122448979585,92.68510204081636,87.77551020408163,5.248979591836736,21.285714285714285,6.868970318607317,0.6635632653061228,216,7,40,3,7,62,37,49,0.0,0.7929999999999999,0.207,0.893,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,2,4,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,3,5,0,0,0,6,7,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,2,6,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,11,2,0,0,0,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20661579364053928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6043849265904873,0.21361420657820385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21395642248186508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710583224064653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5730053133469715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14053417370835536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30467424340809,0.0,0.17449385946408005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spicecitrus27,2020/03/26,"She keeps saying her brain is dying My younger sister who is in her 20s have been telling me in her mind, it feels like she is dying. She said she is screaming internally & can't seem to get her insides under control. She is not on any medication. I think she has anxiety and depression. She spends her time watching TV & not interacting with anyone socially. Last year she ended a long term relationship & moved back in with family. It's been almost a year. She has no health insurance but recently when to the ER because she kept saying her brain is dying & I also think she was having a panic attack. When they did blood work & other tests physically they found nothing. I don't know how to go about helping her. She is serious about what she is experiencing in her mind or brain & I don't know what are the next steps to help her. I don't want her to go to a psych ward. ANY ADVICE PLEASE",4.254576923076924,5.483743372222222,5.281111111111112,81.86115384615384,70.83333333333333,8.427350427350428,25.51282051282051,8.841846274778883,1.7347435897435894,717,21,144,13,13,236,106,180,0.1,0.8340000000000001,0.066,-0.5161,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,2,7,6,1,1,6,0,21,6,4,2,0,22,35,7,3,1,4,1,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,6,3,0,3,7,1,1,4,7,5,1,0,7,7,32,1,16,28,1,22,0,1,1,0,36,6,0,3,13,92,38,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388355381277856,0.0,0.0,0.09620541458439698,0.0,0.0,0.07683128661152312,0.0,0.6245845033375549,0.0,0.13066883370661758,0.0,0.07349724961255577,0.0,0.0,0.06717799960724395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929938693766934,0.0,0.07387588293433807,0.0,0.058566537896300924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217550240320758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775648363520504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274941162067866,0.0,0.2991326050950898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509409271902661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057112908639624,0.0,0.04857849766609509,0.06863612767842815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10534147575212374,0.0,0.0,0.050195316112513856,0.0,0.10920347751929033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212342349792493,0.0,0.0,0.1287943357452691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539603423463596,0.0,0.0,0.10560081252025398,0.07831409455760525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04693747992777822,0.0,0.0,0.08502351085376347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678563607289116,0.0,0.0,0.19401708737789025,0.0,0.0,0.10211271156828357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217704371495136,0.0,0.0,0.09218672622378647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272352299491073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546169663544264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486264950147533,0.10314878802184144,0.0,0.0,0.09138949702797798,0.15280567837716436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08746323540003463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979365468199002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397394187002513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312219179865835,0.0,0.0,0.056022209984101706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05666763029501394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994387517746913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373853174413113
mentalhealth,Av00cad00,2020/03/26,"The Positive Place Hi everyone,

I hope this is allowed on here, it’s completely non-profit, I do only want to help people. 
I have created a discord server, ‘The Positive Place’ to provide a safe and supportive community where you can find like-minded people to work, chat, and socialise with during Coronavirus self-isolation, quarantine and/or social distancing, and beyond.

The Positive Place is also designed to help those struggling with mental, and/or physical illness that often may leave them housebound and therefore unable to socialise “normally”, to connect with people in similar situations, and to find those that understand them.

Join The Positive Place using the link below - I hope to see you there!

[The Positive Place Invite](https://discord.gg/NZHw6HB)",11.326933797909412,12.440462390243905,9.874239256678283,55.565853658536604,55.17886178861789,13.532636469221835,43.5876887340302,12.785403640627713,6.589690824622532,626,32,75,20,7,194,81,123,0.066,0.655,0.27899999999999997,0.9829,1,2,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,2,2,1,6,5,0,1,8,0,6,1,0,3,0,22,13,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,8,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,4,15,12,0,10,0,0,1,0,9,10,0,4,0,53,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555390775256183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839103917810655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612395628141146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24127648618473405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17694283193572966,0.0,0.0,0.2621955597484532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976040768149653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448459533790185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301683197221675,0.0,0.13327423401780625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293240779096695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038581912651047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745197782403529,0.0,0.6895174279137827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051804881442408,0.0,0.13769638112561022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836447224191035,0.0,0.13454916199570416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798663554660492,0.0,0.0,0.14978289078689055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374082658161165,0.0,0.1139986582182054,0.0,0.0,0.07785226675898302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960917052667448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dweeby_monkey,2020/03/26,"How do I tell my therapist that I think I have pure OCD? I've been suspecting that I have OCD for a while, but today I saw a random post about Pure OCD. I did some more research and I checked out all the boxes. It sounded exactly like me and for the first time in my life my mind felt understood. 

As far as my therapist is concerned, I definitely have depression and anxiety. 

I am afraid of suggesting that I may have something else because:

- she might think that she's the professional and I'm not

- people might dismiss me of getting in my head and trying to self-diagnose myself with everything I come across

- I might appear as someone who is trying to turn into a victim or a basket case 

- I don't want people to think I'm a monster

- I haven't really talked about the obscene sexual thoughts that keep popping into my brain

I want to know how I should talk to her about this in a way that lets her know I am very serious about this and am almost certain that I have pure OCD.",6.834242424242426,5.630368585858591,7.388565656565657,77.35618181818181,65.16161616161617,10.950303030303033,33.43636363636364,10.125756701596842,3.0772266666666663,772,27,157,15,10,256,110,198,0.11199999999999999,0.8390000000000001,0.048,-0.8703,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,6,6,1,1,10,0,21,3,2,2,6,44,39,14,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,5,1,1,0,0,11,11,0,1,9,0,1,2,3,4,0,1,6,3,31,2,24,27,3,16,0,1,1,0,9,8,0,9,5,113,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048088556862431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732201256065907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551991739657361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15661083424962374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12084802830872834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208321867846396,0.1423921220690578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171948902105708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260842481489743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470108639261782,0.0,0.0,0.1193312100424918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329610801372319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397874689643106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12469683297093614,0.0,0.0,0.1542002154836879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14345676051047046,0.09909148050442272,0.06853895672191432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4464788342168001,0.1416536292059783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945198343008088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435972450650913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898738240248671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635381143789766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886786709177995,0.10800264596676447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255207243120496,0.12262026799167862,0.0,0.0,0.32577666476154865,0.0,0.2696778753838049,0.0,0.1113751566473714,0.08180464378305825,0.0,0.13297919353465915,0.0,0.0,0.190496372372582,0.15259601182737242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575453185233897,0.1654941963778006,0.1113562391341007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Randompersonhere15,2020/03/26,"Venting 15M, on mobile in UK.

Basically everything:

-I'm an idiot
-Cutting
-Stressed
-For some reason people don't like/hate me(my peers)
-Insult myself in English
-Wasted most of my childhood and faced wizh reality that in like 2.5 years I'm an adult...
-Wasting my life rn
-Scared of dying
-No ambition
-Hate everything/everyone
-For some weird reason I'm short tempered
-Told by my own mum I'm living in ""my world""
-Failure
-Asshole
-Hate this damn reallity 
-The fact that whatever I ever did/will do in life won't matter, because in the end, the end is always the same. The only difference being who, why and when.
-Leech

I hate being in the middle. Most of the time dying scares me...but then it doesn't. Sometimes I don't want to die and the other times I do want to die...why the hdll can't I just f-ing decide...

This is not a cry for help and I won't do anything about any of this. I'm too fucked up to be fixed/fix myself. I just needed to vent somewhere.",0.08396696891191624,2.386419305699484,1.9860216968911928,91.56613099093269,99.46632124352331,4.277784974093263,18.984617875647672,6.158741222570753,0.1913006476683936,758,25,149,9,32,249,123,193,0.248,0.701,0.051,-0.9901,0,0,0,0,0,2,52.0,0,0,0,0,6,14,9,3,12,0,14,4,1,2,2,21,27,6,3,3,3,1,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,8,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,8,13,0,0,1,0,13,1,22,21,6,21,0,0,0,1,6,12,2,4,10,87,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680635890729696,0.0,0.0,0.08728965621935605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10562989309474843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824747208510657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099816693722436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5328724332511517,0.13410957835228862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273789055596558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610957339795867,0.0,0.12265411947743805,0.11536229205716927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866736960370265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38018875650269107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603745033377075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18132987240121806,0.12542107771154584,0.0,0.11334482191583801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517780920189294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09762407250777136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898912538625721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263952291206885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570228436317458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12695198326863222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14703671202148522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149696276042086,0.0,0.0,0.12265411947743805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142089592146785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316510760986152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266006201053336
mentalhealth,BunnyBearBoxer,2020/03/26,"Postpartum, I feel like something in my mind has snapped. I’m 24 days PP. My daughter is beautiful, a perfect 50/50 of my husband and I. She’s growing at an amazing rate, she’s displaying behaviours months ahead of her age, she’s incredible. 

I have a history of mental illness (MDD, anxiety, and though never confirmed I feel maybe a little bipolar) and when I got pregnant I knew that PP I would have to really watch myself. 

The first week was awful, I cried constantly all day and night, I was terrified to take my eyes off my baby, and kept questioning if I was capable of being a mother. 

Things got better after the first week until a day or two ago. 

My daughter got a tummy bug or something and started having diarrhea. No fever, still feeding well, and other than some obvious digestive discomfort and fussiness, she was fine...but in my head she was going to die. I became irrational, I wouldn’t let my husband near her and refused to put her down. I started seeing symptoms that weren’t truly there, convinced her skin was changing colour or her soft spot was sinking, her breathing becoming laboured or I swear I could feel her burning up. 

My husband tried calming me down and I just lost it. I had the sense to finally hand over my daughter before I began screaming at him and eventually began crying and hyperventilating. 

After eventually calming down and chugging some water, I managed to relax enough to put my daughter to bed in her bassinet beside our bed. I slept with my head on the side of her bassinet, waking every 10 minutes to check her breath. 

She woke up for a feed and instead of putting her back, I fell asleep with her in my arms. I woke up and she was hot and clammy because of my body heat, and had ended up in a weird seated position. This again caused me to lose it, sobbing that I was a bad mom and though she seemed perfectly fine other than being warm (she cooled down immediately after being placed back in her bassinet) but I couldn’t stop these horrible thoughts that I’d damaged her because realistically I could have killed her if I’d rolled onto her or she had been smothered some other way. 

Since then I’m overwhelmed with guilt, and grief. But the worst started this morning. I feel I keep seeing weird things. As my baby was feeding, for a second she didn’t look like my baby and her face looked a bit distorted. I looked away quickly and tried to focus on something else, I started seeing weird things around the room and thinking inanimate objects were moving and becoming sinister. 

My baby is now in her bassinet in the bedroom with my husband and I’m locked in the bathroom trying to get a grip of my mind. 

I feel so anxious, I keep imagining her dying or my husband dying. I feel like I’m in survival mode, like I’m anticipating an attack. 

I’m not sure what to do",5.77411873840445,6.6264179517625275,6.200415584415588,78.03776623376625,67.07050092764379,8.608979591836734,32.83970315398887,8.676224119757912,2.701586864564008,2232,94,403,33,35,721,264,539,0.16,0.762,0.078,-0.9931,1,0,3,0,0,0,59.0,1,0,0,9,15,34,3,3,22,2,34,22,13,1,6,75,75,41,5,7,12,11,12,4,0,2,5,1,4,0,16,29,5,5,12,1,1,7,7,17,1,4,29,23,87,17,63,37,7,75,0,6,9,0,45,32,1,13,39,284,103,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07077898596827867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06108225158183439,0.09020366642365438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108019431665773,0.0,0.09083676853026694,0.07501828941174782,0.12279385394727743,0.06666838057890302,0.09734720743748093,0.17636807648021802,0.06794337666004184,0.0,0.0,0.07061762224384416,0.08717155184566543,0.08869131275594126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202421276505169,0.08446686817260153,0.0,0.0,0.0862855559039096,0.0,0.12750165248034526,0.0,0.17541496791376948,0.15448290199132533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486037659513503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670139328501226,0.0,0.07072018078216055,0.08250264054740412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06727400725576388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422363311457356,0.11408451991216947,0.0,0.08746779129529761,0.0,0.13583455657357166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04171643079403741,0.0,0.04537852996273863,0.0,0.19158129942572472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16389081476447953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14194223796695318,0.08833817395951248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081648319180213,0.0,0.1560356052875243,0.08002703530965975,0.0,0.0,0.20115251332073195,0.08932765985068991,0.08716174082146384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021640691312618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08046635704796949,0.0,0.16124413641141871,0.09351509904861817,0.06373260770949833,0.08486405097601983,0.0,0.0,0.06158243997362853,0.0,0.0,0.07493040572273225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342245822979266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240802955188471,0.08944620382570721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0511516267606856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19088164831489834,0.07268913295435002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604973921719079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18440890088742076,0.0,0.0,0.2260626758088069,0.0,0.06376541117649596,0.06675513741363683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525425518572396,0.08299094709301016,0.06003453036767551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591391332727627,0.05116232739590673,0.1568972987477579,0.06338909582464113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263132415792358,0.0,0.07799829763122951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06337832893463101,0.12809587738888106,0.0,0.07179147236272226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056720567633126474,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,D0ntPan1c_42,2020/03/26,"I've never known what to do. But now I've fallen in love, and everything is worse I was broken as a child. A specific and unique trauma led to me distancing from all connection, at an age way too young to cope with that much fear. I found out later that I was also born schizophrenic. This combination of an over active, unhealthy imagination brought on by mild schizophrenia, and complete isolation from everyone, created loneliness only few could understand. Through the years I taught myself how to survive, tiger stripes hidden on my body, and human connection with people who didn't really exist. I've never had anything romantic up to my current adult life, apart from metaphysical. I considered myself Asexual. I was sure that it was impossible after the life forced on me. Now after an entire half life of being alone in more ways than literal, I have fallen in love. 


I know people say no one's perfect, something I of course believed as strongly as anyone else living a life with monsters. But she is perfect. Her imperfections only make her that much more so. I know deep down that there Is no one else like her, beautiful in every way possible to the imagination. How much she actually cares amazes me. She is everything to me right now, but that's part of the problem. 


I have been broken so long, that I have no idea how to make her happy, how to be healthy enough to be a healthy thing in her life. I want to be someone that makes her life better, but I can't. I worry even my feelings for her alone are unfair. I know she deserves someone better than me. But I don't know how to not love her.",5.118761140819963,6.532954702614379,5.760689245395131,78.53491978609627,68.96732026143792,8.962329174093881,29.268568033273915,9.339509955726095,2.6076261437908506,1273,47,232,26,22,413,165,306,0.128,0.708,0.16399999999999998,0.9426,1,3,1,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,6,14,16,0,1,11,0,23,11,1,9,6,43,40,20,0,3,6,0,1,1,0,0,7,1,0,3,13,8,0,0,11,0,0,4,9,3,0,3,10,2,39,13,45,25,9,37,0,0,0,3,20,16,0,0,15,172,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.09780536252614973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20760621475682045,0.0,0.08015007670452892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07007980809434836,0.10269258769970906,0.08247682092879423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11291950802584975,0.0,0.17728213465898465,0.0,0.11132763148543656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021862971636295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508424218027587,0.0,0.0,0.08002168724334964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16745063074289845,0.0,0.0,0.1035594499397188,0.0,0.06619781626432056,0.0,0.08444407524925898,0.09576949812157416,0.1801519404246647,0.0,0.0,0.112781243074978,0.0506768854960753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989178671953538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669161633513903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131420802496611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22032465150178865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4247522451337187,0.048964982658047565,0.0,0.08850071041890895,0.08869617075494131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713715374829442,0.0,0.20070334905536868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22103121864191028,0.0,0.15459974534876586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358304134359536,0.15245160078578907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853415245136584,0.0,0.13896710380098354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298888275077808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590200518991697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420684593500656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559179504383224,0.0,0.07970312214568878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16984101682093836,0.07715827523086591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446108901422323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066585186430656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433799448538884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05911543480684156,0.2386623569507849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178358164830822,0.1021380673702647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06454175927538386
mentalhealth,soberusername,2020/03/26,"friend attempted suicide last night I really don't know where to ask for advice or anything about this but last night my good friend and I had a few beers at his house, ended up inviting a girl over and got pretty fucked up together. after she left he went manic and started destroying his house. I left after he threw a 40 lb weight at me because I was scared I'd get killed. I ended up passing out at home and woke up this morning and found out didn't have my phone. I went back to buddies house and his parents said he was in the hospital for attempted suicide after I left he destroyed the entire house on a rampage. I don't know why he would do anything like this we were just having a good time like we usually do.... and I don't even have my phone to call him to talk to him. his sister said this has happened before but I am fucking rattled.",3.371445623342176,4.595665419540231,4.278275862068966,88.22892572944298,72.9655172413793,6.963041556145005,26.028293545534925,7.321109707123232,1.1689996463306809,669,22,139,7,13,216,98,174,0.171,0.691,0.138,-0.8898,1,0,1,0,0,2,12.0,2,0,0,2,5,12,5,1,7,0,16,4,0,0,0,19,32,10,3,1,4,2,1,2,2,1,0,2,1,1,4,11,2,0,3,1,0,4,4,6,0,0,13,3,23,6,23,18,1,33,0,0,0,2,26,16,2,1,15,88,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105444102159947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775942270917727,0.0,0.10087716856378444,0.0,0.0,0.08297274475590162,0.0,0.0657782514007412,0.0,0.09181971683840498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018368080299397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911446646718601,0.0,0.0,0.07127063023425059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831291935366264,0.16673519570955594,0.1995139743905605,0.056376221661501885,0.0,0.0,0.18101219322230847,0.0863019646139603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954205645330115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823811354263023,0.0,0.0,0.4980342926913602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938155737488484,0.0,0.11860419009877192,0.17591492975571424,0.0,0.0,0.3517192460210449,0.0,0.0,0.105434449967774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20252418923695686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198163975473912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977878660212642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691270895835844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20528586892186126,0.0,0.1080323285444535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637613811996552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23606242229753516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673043281300917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292062233359544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884277213793833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313999492326706,0.0,0.2000591420390393,0.09736801915014984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665304132654605,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KeKoolKat,2020/03/26,"I find amusement in the death of a person or any other serious situation? It's really hard to explain and I do this in a lot of situations dealing with bad or negative events but death is the easiest to recall and make a point with. Let's say a friend says, ""My mom died today."" For some reason I let out a very genuine laugh or uncontrollable grin that lingers a little too long before I get it under control. Scary movies are more like comedies to me. I break out into laughter when people die in movies. It's not like a defense mechanism. It's not because i'm uncomfortable. It's like genuine amusement I would even go as far to say I feel joy. It's really unsettling, when it happens talking to people it makes me feel bad. It's also kinda weird because I wouldn't categorize myself as a violent person, I would never intentionally harm someone much less kill them for my personal enjoyment.",4.616618037135279,6.150108787356322,6.177126436781608,74.61513262599472,70.32183908045978,9.032007073386383,30.625994694960212,9.466822959209583,2.9917007957559685,715,30,127,16,13,244,109,174,0.228,0.516,0.256,0.8549,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,1,5,19,3,1,10,0,8,0,0,5,1,32,17,11,5,3,6,1,3,3,1,3,0,3,0,3,12,7,0,2,6,2,0,1,5,9,0,0,0,6,15,10,20,12,5,18,0,0,0,0,12,10,0,7,9,85,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030347774508022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761687324586585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21515511885104974,0.1570815865344185,0.0,0.1096349210337567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445070855883492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283028548223305,0.0,0.0,0.2674349886489145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509882394333325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13029261689260144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775911279586078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995428903758024,0.0,0.06731454662311821,0.0,0.0732237900683953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393441863891213,0.0,0.11541698662265874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14254441275087856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26349903304485256,0.0,0.18883685325665733,0.12913337735096905,0.0,0.11402097902118832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953672977953356,0.0,0.0,0.17200586494578765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15089801248704782,0.0,0.0,0.09471358131656027,0.0,0.09937077424568888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17864542620341367,0.3374991899903971,0.0,0.0,0.1217971895440302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507877106891225,0.13247087595071366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3073806210824666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896472656395791,0.0,0.0,0.10916727774743673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355819512504368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212700463464585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10630801610574753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18305110105323533,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,h3lpmyfather9911,2020/03/26,"I am losing my father to insanity, help me please I have nowhere else to go.In December, my father received a perceived threat on his phone. He worked on some investigations and the threat was made to deter him. The threat targeted us as a family, which gave him a huge shock.Insomnia, anxiety, near 0 emotions, all came at once. one day he was good and then the next i lost my father.

We had to put him at the hospital where they put him to sleep (he hadn't slept for 4 days straight)

Then he got better, and then worse.

Long story short, it's been 3 months. He has completely forgotten about the incident (He used to be very paranoid, thought that his phone was bugged, hacked etc.). After clinical psychologists, psychiatrists... nothing. He then started reading 12 rules for life by JBP. He believes that he has never loved my father, says that he has never felt anything for this family (all completely false, he has been the best father, i cannot even describe).Lately, i am noticing suicidal tendencies too.

He currently takes Olanzapine, 5 mg a day. Takes lorazepam too when his insomnia kicks in.

The quarantine is not helping. Doctors are less available.

​

Help me. He thinks he is a bad person. a bad father. a bad husband. focuses on the negative aspects of life. ""i have created my own hell"". ""take care of yourself"".  


EDIT: sorry if the sentences are abrupt, not well written. I am just typing whatever comes to mind as I am in complete helplessness. ",3.39614664786566,6.211973260223048,4.214203307268299,81.37018587360599,78.47955390334573,7.873913600820407,27.863222663761054,8.74248658614541,2.633136033841816,1153,50,203,28,29,369,167,269,0.201,0.7120000000000001,0.087,-0.9868,1,1,0,0,0,0,62.0,2,0,1,5,8,16,4,0,16,0,23,8,2,2,4,22,41,11,1,1,4,7,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,6,6,0,0,4,1,0,5,7,10,1,1,16,2,25,6,25,24,7,34,1,3,0,1,41,12,1,2,17,123,31,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731262762843785,0.13156228707121584,0.0,0.0,0.08282775601480735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909860090404287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712077019505574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198542653046872,0.11362474624273088,0.0957577534240479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238342826984355,0.11039048312379296,0.0,0.0,0.09326670982775703,0.3405632825036096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20947937875954484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082094290712434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904473326667895,0.12179138635707902,0.0,0.0,0.12075186012730613,0.0715126110055329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041383431760987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395806463609912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06153345220139419,0.09081338637401637,0.08659498034697438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21771724534116285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15295138014165402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581728091379878,0.0,0.12112863268594737,0.11819163857956252,0.0,0.09771967462140653,0.10244955012982747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932381865139996,0.0,0.08642164859423189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16701202659821926,0.0,0.11514846190503593,0.0,0.0,0.1038898694538797,0.12326834849913162,0.0,0.11530610791757025,0.0733678848255415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09453890261569046,0.0,0.11885010287971125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21768645723298646,0.0,0.0,0.10830126381110207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610221139580393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835015659745012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120159920742385,0.07663545330700804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11843195523388772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442211266768126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937630262401984,0.0,0.08595584522499919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023784137235184,0.09351221359024964,0.0,0.08933570935836448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734949846825486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882327921751055,0.0,0.1103383811263796,0.0,0.0,0.13156228707121584,0.0
mentalhealth,Emma-the-lesbian,2020/03/26,I've never talked about it but my aunt abuses me. It's always my fault. I'm never good enough. I'm always the cause of all her problems. I'm the reason why we're poor. She's always yelling at me and I can't escape her. I don't know what to do.,-2.2501315789473684,-0.4570566491228068,0.8519078947368435,101.64523026315793,97.94736842105264,2.85,10.633771929824562,3.1291,-1.9822964912280707,189,2,48,0,8,66,39,57,0.345,0.655,0.0,-0.9684,0,0,0,0,2,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,2,3,9,7,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,9,1,4,7,2,3,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,27,12,0,0.0,0.2910181717164527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.613123674488156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25231821635248153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537899286753101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060134369102312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349856957105312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3788727959459353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23502406657370026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525370841368456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974191266394517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22163280730628065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Worldofquestions2020,2020/03/26,"Soul searchers of Reddit, how do you begin to find yourself, after being lost? So, I have struggled with some mental health issues and a past that has led to me losing myself and I know I can’t be the same, but I want to reconstruct a new identity for myself. How do I go about it? I could really use some advice.",1.0247098214285728,3.2881465156250016,3.094464285714285,89.16125000000002,83.84375,5.5321428571428575,16.955357142857142,6.868970318607317,0.07040446428571423,243,5,49,3,7,82,51,64,0.09699999999999999,0.878,0.025,-0.4938,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,2,4,3,0,1,3,0,8,1,0,4,0,16,14,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,1,0,10,0,8,10,3,6,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,4,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692476867690093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199907031089847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518321965514401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15659176988461207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928787250276161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875848962589221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142574677513015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30825098052219824,0.3007768491545279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776724868931437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661115160959774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630274531284853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17651351362659784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880469462559936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23797207060638945,0.0,0.0,0.16251651915563947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ArcaneAdalain,2020/03/26,"Should I tell my childs teachers about my mental health disorder? My child (Elementary school age) is currently participating in home learning due to school closures caused by covid 19.
Somedays my mental health disorder hits me hard, today being one of those days. Somedays can be quite debilitating, luckily today isn't one of those days.
I've been trying my best all morning to help him with his school work, but I've had to walk away a few times already, not because of frustration, but because I dont want him to see me in pain (mentally). I don't want him to think he's the cause of it. It's usually things that arent even happening in front of me (it's all in my head).
So I'm wondering if I should inform his teachers or maybe even the school social worker since we have no idea when or if they will be back to school this year (in our area). I feel like he's going to fall behind caused by my bad day's. I know the teachers have said not to stress too much about their work, to do what we can. But I worry that it wont be enough and they might need to know why.
Should I inform his teachers or someone from his school?",4.493552631578943,5.127347916666668,4.984491228070175,86.3991052631579,69.83333333333334,8.185263157894736,26.16491228070176,8.238735603445708,1.3820101754385972,887,25,190,12,15,283,130,228,0.10300000000000001,0.8270000000000001,0.071,-0.7549,2,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,3,0,3,5,8,6,1,1,4,0,22,4,1,3,2,35,36,11,0,8,10,0,2,1,0,6,3,1,1,2,11,4,0,0,9,0,0,4,8,4,0,2,3,4,31,2,28,22,6,24,0,0,1,0,23,7,0,7,14,122,42,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340713825602156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804007348550644,0.07205429509163057,0.07824077530095179,0.11424487766395976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833889128664072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887862856932231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812982693982984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21479088112172956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982298593414863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682356920556916,0.0,0.12378414230776467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04738067779239959,0.06694373862284599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05325540136827127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286409633547236,0.0,0.08394236274255709,0.0,0.09616961069499362,0.19921064900239016,0.0,0.0,0.06280930058168323,0.0,0.09399497384720867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057829106227567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299697012099764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04578012329923191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414048780308458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28330147394049376,0.09940748570127704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888484990094634,0.06948197097515954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269955126566679,0.0,0.09971001939560002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09966809403476344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891360688437723,0.0,0.0,0.5690141530757555,0.07467172106275972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751474926952125,0.0,0.0,0.09552168535283057,0.0793969717668385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734015252745006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190336206050025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06225424536521877,0.060043158794284526,0.0,0.0,0.05464084745312055,0.0,0.17764506982355724,0.0,0.0,0.0636203688557518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320415695932912,0.0,0.11054070674321463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455528384618638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016203927814393,0.13643848091450747,0.09516320980318282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060343730094036874
mentalhealth,it_is_i_josie_lim,2020/03/26,"I don't think I'm ok So I don't really know how to say this, but I just feel like I really hate myself.  I think there is something going on with me. Im not that old, so I don't really want to say anything to my parents or anyone I know because I feel like they would just brush it off or tell me I'm too young to be having problems like that. I really try to be happy and to make people believe it, and they do, so everything's fine for now. But I don't know how long I can keep this up. Not to mention that I'm overweight and i think I have an eating disorder. I started purging after most meals by vomiting ever since last year in an effort to lose weight, but it didn't work and now I can't stop. If I don't purge I feel really sick and disgusted. I also have eczema, which is really stressful because I do care about my appearance, and I feel like the least I could do is have nice skin. Everyone tells me that no one will look and no one will care, but they don't under stand, I CARE. I might sound a bit narcissistic here, but let's be honest, everyone like to look at themselves in the mirror, because everyone wants to like their body. I want to look at myself in the mirror and like me, but I can't, I really can't. I'm not very skilled in anything either. People tell me I'm just being pessimistic and negative, and that I should be happier. But I don't know HOW. If I told anyone anything, they would probably tell me that I'm just ungrateful because I have a great life. A nice house, a mom and a dad, siblings, food on the table, I go to a nice school, my family isn't struggling etc. But I can't help feeling like that, I don't know why. I also have an image to keep up at school. I'm the so called “nice girl”, the girl with good grades, the one with many friends,",2.9576396761133594,3.4969996789473683,4.611578947368424,88.03143724696359,73.26315789473685,8.05668016194332,24.089068825910932,8.263242389622931,1.1561133603238871,1378,36,315,21,26,467,160,380,0.156,0.644,0.2,0.9674,1,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,5,4,20,28,2,2,16,1,40,10,2,4,1,66,78,32,0,10,20,3,7,8,1,6,4,3,0,2,13,14,5,3,13,0,0,3,20,6,0,3,2,14,50,22,33,63,5,28,0,1,3,0,21,13,0,7,19,207,63,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11937751246447999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043786045911384,0.0,0.18426453454475866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18199688996665891,0.0,0.0,0.08409255818015413,0.0,0.0,0.08148642240029016,0.08290706797628541,0.0,0.0,0.07621473208923732,0.0,0.2282982087775271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05959314300807093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554272444567781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637429852842917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324217992205027,0.0,0.06751522027063071,0.0,0.21396219927283985,0.06708069223946997,0.0,0.07036297690875642,0.0,0.18869852590006675,0.21328837635829268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025373711602663,0.0,0.05766588199922006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483809183515899,0.06260362564938309,0.0,0.0822897263928027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945456999284374,0.0,0.07369052895038211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05002892733830428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612334855783249,0.0,0.0,0.08062289421165836,0.0,0.0,0.13268508951057276,0.0,0.0,0.2050981258558857,0.0608407213487483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632340235002227,0.05271971086679073,0.2917186392288918,0.0,0.0,0.06605313846974367,0.18803380598699526,0.0835019139674144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049822091129216005,0.07567219912262557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918015059831815,0.0,0.0874162579481437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832104193174033,0.0,0.15173189040837606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287774171657405,0.0,0.0,0.10349052582514373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047343217852337,0.07141941274824154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3347094417274999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871180725728858,0.0,0.15107724203823547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06174212613319038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057460724567154425,0.0,0.0,0.052829846147829804,0.0,0.0,0.06240151987092917,0.08549868636563608,0.07802885585018379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26095099364838586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434769118902211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132073309094662,0.0,0.05067496025658221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06158496592957511,0.13207199254803936,0.0,0.0,0.09089015591349943,0.0,0.0,0.0673500598228949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05433805809494323,0.0,0.0,0.10604276360985754,0.0,0.0,0.04806504865104663
mentalhealth,Schiz1717,2020/03/26,"This is what Schizophrenia looks like In this video Michelle Hammer of Schizophrenic.NYC, recorded herself having a Schizophrenia Episode that she recorded on her security camera.

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZioMfQ79yAA](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZioMfQ79yAA%22%3EView)",25.122023809523807,33.31780525,9.121428571428574,46.2902380952381,32.214285714285715,8.019047619047619,45.04761904761904,8.841846274778883,5.405533333333335,249,10,17,3,3,50,25,28,0.0,0.82,0.18,0.644,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,3,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,13,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.502869546948834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8643623191413856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,didntucmego,2020/03/26,"I don't think I am okay. Long vent alert. I think there's something wrong with me .
1.I try not to be judgmental at all,but I can litterally dislike someone because his/her voice is annoying to me. I can't tell you how many times I skipped an important part in a lecture because the voice is annoying. Or walked away in a thrilling scene because I don't like how the actor sounds.
2. I binge eat like crazy. Always regretting it afterwards 
3. I procastinate. 
4. Motivational videos don't do anything for me. I actually look for the shortest one and spend all of the time waiting for it to end. 
5 .I hate working with others. I've been paired up with someone so reliant I just wanted to go ahead and tell the professor she did none of the work.  And dislike people that rely on me. I only help them so if I ever needed help from them they could help me back. But most of them don't. 
6. I think I am a horrible person. I don't have sympathy to humans (i'll cry if a dog got in an accident or a bird had broken wings ). I don't like people, I don't get attached to humans and can easily walk away from a friendship (was never in a relationship and think I'll be a horrible partner btw, so why make them suffer)  if I felt the other person is using me. I don't tolerate most things and being a really picked-on kid made me point out everything I find wrong with how people treat me . Like if someone I cared about told me something I don't like I'll text them and be like don't do this again, i don't like it. If i didn't care about them I'll just hate them. Honestly, I wouldn't even like to be in the same room as that someone, it hives me a weird feeling and makes me sick.

I don't wnat to lose the people that matter to me and if I kept on being like that I might. Mum has a higher voice and sometimes I want to put earbuds in my ears in the morning cause It triggers my headache.
 I already have a bad image (according to others). binge eating only adds salt to the injury and that'll will get more people to pick on or annoy me and will get my mood even worse. Like I spend 2 hours re-living the bad experience and procastinate even more. Then feel guilty because I didn't finish my work so I eat. Gain weight, get pick on and the cycle goes on. 
And don't get me wrong, I am somewhat a strong person. Like I've been pick on during my childhood about almost everything so I am kind of used to people being mean and won't refrain from back talking some of them and can be rather mean sometimes. 
Sorry for the bad grammar and the mistakes. I've learned english from TV and just wanted to vent to someone.
Thank you for reading and wish you all a good day/night.",1.9419465394853568,3.718097284420292,3.489338952972492,90.11049689440996,77.96739130434783,6.3177166518781425,22.859509020999702,7.209633053413488,0.7347729517894113,2079,64,448,25,49,687,246,552,0.18100000000000002,0.715,0.10400000000000001,-0.9916,0,0,2,0,0,0,58.0,0,3,9,8,23,38,5,0,31,1,51,6,1,14,4,90,86,40,0,16,15,1,4,11,1,6,1,5,1,7,15,26,4,3,12,4,2,4,21,16,0,1,12,11,69,21,57,59,11,39,0,3,1,0,29,20,0,15,26,287,84,8,0.0,0.0,0.0669559591925781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870556584029011,0.0,0.07571566398590747,0.0,0.05709114474889606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564622891200413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289275137818648,0.10551764390562536,0.17186586011160954,0.16730231423480624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13991015147250913,0.0704839973334339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054781544561571915,0.0,0.07536767323871511,0.04424942377769472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106233281383044,0.0,0.0,0.060770361160888686,0.0,0.0,0.13595384250776368,0.06206398691438352,0.0,0.0,0.12332908605407593,0.06711624750686446,0.0,0.0,0.06938514187041575,0.0,0.06587881562994362,0.0,0.06271063505164012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17923614855466874,0.0,0.03899409792630888,0.057548958405553026,0.05487573056237862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548139237812756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796865414430892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06756954874834029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144942084153344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687269312891785,0.0,0.0,0.060719954777714566,0.05761726826168283,0.07675990206394942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06492286142493185,0.09159883058949247,0.06956236471277953,0.0,0.14947838039049546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278708135609298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05087534241986827,0.05291823461104876,0.0,0.0,0.06438823780341651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04649364505293424,0.10436588441996074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743007141412288,0.0,0.28540385182013955,0.17972951758223407,0.0,0.0,0.0648610449116732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897457177270151,0.0,0.0,0.06863112559931167,0.0,0.04395496162246767,0.0,0.0,0.07366420983055708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.290675988968608,0.10564259861204044,0.13571914869300433,0.07680614136276989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05514817517648131,0.11994079994236465,0.0631692250798899,0.0,0.0,0.04558313481317778,0.17585662702181198,0.0,0.0,0.08001706875250057,0.0,0.0,0.06556223955928152,0.0,0.04658342308067009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851844106225808,0.0,0.0,0.12140839331340746,0.0,0.0,0.08355161139443927,0.0,0.0,0.061912161654450126,0.0,0.0789010556436748,0.0,0.0,0.14985227833247194,0.0,0.06992205840476072,0.0,0.225051183798269,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kittenfuneral,2020/03/26,"Can’t bring myself to sleep unless the sun is up So for the past year or so, I have not been able to sleep unless the sun is up. I believe this is linked to my anxiety at night, which mostly occurs due to my phobia of death (thanatophobia). As soon as the sun rises, I am able to sleep just fine. Does anyone else suffer from this? My sleep schedule is in absolute ruins due to this problem.",3.0757916666666683,4.250085662500002,4.212500000000002,88.60916666666668,73.625,6.833333333333335,20.833333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.4367083333333333,303,6,64,3,6,99,52,80,0.2,0.779,0.02,-0.9425,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,8,4,4,0,0,8,9,7,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,1,0,7,1,17,8,1,13,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,2,7,47,11,0,0.3779487121070954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14456486513540562,0.0,0.0,0.132135263625273,0.19362655973307144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21290938670014814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16537273245817244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786382582300126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17733963168229866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18039740574720425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808229371989951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7564433242938624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169328953084738
mentalhealth,OGdosh,2020/03/26,"i just want my life to be better part 2 Original post:  [https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/cjsh4m/i\_just\_want\_my\_life\_to\_be\_better\_why\_is\_it\_so\_hard/](https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/cjsh4m/i_just_want_my_life_to_be_better_why_is_it_so_hard/) 

​

I don't really know how to start this.

After that last post, and a few months, I flew back home for a month and somehow moved on. Felt alright. But then I had to fly back due to school and finding new place to move. so i was still stuck with her for another month. 

I found a place to move but she couldn't and silly of me i helped her rented a storage place and let her crash at my place for a short period. and during those days i helped as much as i could ( probably I still had feelings for her. Blinded by love yet again). Thought things would change and be better. But i guess i wasnt. 

Context: Due to this coronavirus thing, her friend could not travel out of china and left 3 cats at her apartment, my ex has 2 so they also stay there but no one lives there.  But my ex later moved there. 

​

So the first thing was I basically traveled to her friends place nearly everyday to clean and feed those cats. and did what i could. I used my spare time on things for her. even after she moved there i still went there from time to time to help out. And there is a time that she ran out of cat food and asked me to help get a bunch. i did too.  "" she repaid with buying dinner a few times"" 

Second, I spend my time waking up in the morning to get her coffee as she goes to work. and the money i used is my own money. so dumb of me . 

last thing is that she comes to me for suggestions on chasing her new crush. This has been happening since last year. and when shes sad asf i was always there with her to cheer her up. 

And now shes dating this new guy that she only met once face to face and became official the second time they met. 

I have tried contacting her cause we still have things to settle. but she initially brush it off and now totally ghost me. the thing is im the owner of the storage space and also i have some of her important things (passport, ID and other currencies with debit cards ) with me in my apartment that she has forgotten to take. I just want a normal face to face conversation and get things sorted out but she doesn't acknowledge such a thing. 

The problem with me now is i feel really mixed up. i put so much effort into these things and yet im the one that get trashed. i feel like a tool. and the other thing is that, that dude didnt use any effort in chasing her.  I really dont know how i feel, kinda the same as before or a betrayal. 

But i acknowledge myself why i got myself into this. I went too deep into this relationship and now its hard to recover and jump back out. 

I have been trying to occupy myself but at the end at night, these things just comes back. the rage , the jealousy and the regret. maybe i just worry too much, maybe its just me. 

​

please give me some suggestions on how should i deal with this, 

its the worst time now with this quarantine. alone and dont really know what to do.",3.9626484254001006,6.163173731543625,3.709194630872485,88.88375322663914,73.4295302013423,6.598038203407331,19.347444501806926,7.468242284971852,0.2948759421786269,2488,47,500,30,52,749,248,596,0.099,0.82,0.081,-0.9238,1,2,0,0,0,0,111.0,1,0,2,6,45,15,2,0,28,1,40,11,5,8,1,101,76,52,1,11,16,2,6,1,2,2,2,0,3,1,41,45,3,0,13,2,7,15,9,6,0,5,22,8,84,9,75,45,13,103,0,2,1,1,51,35,1,7,51,368,125,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05513805044673741,0.0,0.08514810556747078,0.04429790978707238,0.17304860289172935,0.19406836613551093,0.03620336238505946,0.055824217347162856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049769926546827735,0.0,0.0,0.1637455717952197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045301237412392524,0.0,0.0,0.09416858060422062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05468963302525265,0.05631827319554841,0.09171887777287753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751756492141045,0.0,0.0,0.03433381816489428,0.05488558062931208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12478803383737733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715267119398423,0.0,0.0,0.03516290239115828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767402786045303,0.03803291929012606,0.05111640070434648,0.0,0.04865815997254617,0.045283836325471824,0.06437506174457097,0.05837223020439264,0.08226240448043985,0.0,0.11125769888382628,0.05107031295620721,0.0,0.0,0.04257893536105604,0.0,0.0586471679018062,0.05271354856048791,0.04707779327551198,0.0,0.04769039155695772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273604126897027,0.0,0.05340160749236054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501138808754985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777390236170439,0.13018713635231027,0.0,0.0,0.057842758306288225,0.05443900602721905,0.03760325888602932,0.02600917980307573,0.0,0.04700973563210334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048048971112835126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696855742460464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274811233126495,0.2829154738862877,0.11740718357643587,0.0,0.0,0.15425148449701856,0.0,0.04995983811691675,0.05216149962008912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669625763623973,0.0721502889208355,0.04048955887307585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05765108313416417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781095650207642,0.0584388474700647,0.0,0.0,0.10197372122719146,0.0,0.05739908762592472,0.05094114938995289,0.0,0.053518446186843406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642136154111373,0.0,0.0,0.05715720951055349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387924697183479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04403865489753141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0376818148078526,0.05674414919418187,0.1700623179126813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040028015191758984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4597926497080265,0.0,0.0,0.04226467126703442,0.24834596739052275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228960926520749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13794046082028905,0.0,0.0,0.06280177749743135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870349203951556,0.04803861200811717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03875757344479979,0.05406532040621062,0.0,0.037818430976290944,0.0,0.19406836613551093,0.0342832393819789
mentalhealth,Royal_Vengeance,2020/03/26,"I want to have my own little podcast where we'd talk mostly about mental health as I'm a Bi-polar bear .  Hello fellow bipolars , I am looking for peeps to have a chat with live on air , talking about anything and everything ! I want to have my own little podcast where we'd talk mostly about mental health as I'm a Bi-polar bear . So yeah , mental health is important to me. Let me know if you want to be a part of this. Thank you !",3.5565543071161048,4.1383741123595525,4.7792696629213465,87.21736891385768,71.92134831460675,6.832209737827719,23.82209737827716,6.42735559955562,0.6338973782771538,332,8,70,2,6,110,52,89,0.0,0.857,0.14300000000000002,0.8249,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,2,2,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,1,9,4,0,0,0,9,17,5,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,11,1,14,13,5,6,0,0,1,0,10,6,0,3,0,47,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13243497818857322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446371115671857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5131959826957916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844512339180602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456592936576706,0.0,0.0,0.32259631483786433,0.14210767973368335,0.0,0.13514403656745608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4865508915516977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17427585048436048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3880579847431933,0.0,0.14816641471723194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847691471769197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ClassFightt,2020/03/26,"How do I remove a past diagnosis?  Hi, I seriously need some advice and any input would be appreciated massively. Before I begin, I want to say that at the time of all of this..I was just a child who had ONE FOCUS and didn’t know the cost that I’d be paying.

At 13 years old, I left school due to being sexually assaulted by somebody that I thought was my friend. They never showed any remorse and I was too scared to take any further action against them. I had to see them every single day, in each lesson. I couldn’t take it anymore so one day..I locked myself in my room and refused to come out. I did this because I knew that nobody would be able to physically drag me into school. My parents wouldn’t have understood if I told them that I just couldn’t do it anymore.

Nobody tried to help me, until one day..a police officer came round our house due to a family dispute and I told them everything..about my dad. Now, I had never spoken up about this before, it was a sensitive matter and I instantly regretted it as soon as the words came out. The thing is, throughout my childhood, my dad would continuously lose his temper and hit me, he’d throw things, slam doors, spit in my face, and call me names. He’d say things like “I wish that you were never born, you ruined my life” or “Nobody likes you” and when I was being bullied in primary School, he’d repeat the names that the bullies would call me. 

I guess that everything just hit me all at once and I couldn’t cope anymore, then I got taken to Cahms. The doctor that I saw didn’t think that I had anything wrong with me..not even anxiety! (Which is something that I’ve struggled with since I was a toddler!) so I knew that I had to get their attention. In my head, it was “If you don’t act like you have something even worse then they’ll send you back to school” so I started lying on every single assessment. I’d make things up about me being suicidal and behave badly. I just wanted them to listen. Obviously now, looking back..I understand that it WASN’T OKAY! But I was so unhappy.

They put me on medication that made me irritable and drowsy, then I got assigned a new doctor. She was completely different to my last one and at first it was great! She didn’t make me go to school, and she seemed to care about me. But it bit me in the ass, and one day I got pulled into a room. At this time, I was about 14. They said “We think that you have emerging BPD” and straight away, I just nodded and agreed. I did not understand that these sort of diagnosis’ can stay with you for life, they can negatively affect everything that you do. 

We’ll skip to when I turned 16, I was much more aware of my own body. I started to be more honest with CAHMS in the sense that yes, I struggled. But I told them multiple times that it wasn’t EUPD..I had done endless amounts of research since then and knew that it wasn’t me. My parents continued to push on that label because they wanted an excuse for my dads behaviour and would say “Nobody will believe you now” 

I left CAHMS at 16 (Best thing that I ever did) and came off all of my medication, started college and met my boyfriend. I was so happy, content and free. Before I left, I told the doctor that I wasn’t struggling anymore and that I wanted the diagnosis removed. She said that it was “emerging” which meant that it could be stopped and that they’d see how I went. I chose not to be referred to the adult services thinking that everything would just go away. WRONG! I was at the doctors one day and they printed some records off for me to take into hospital with me, slammed at the top was “Diagnosis: EUPD and attachment issues” and I ran into the car and just started bawling. I had worked so hard to build a life for myself and yet my past choices were STILL getting brought up. I realised that every doctor that I saw, had seen that diagnosis. I was embarrassed and ashamed.

I’m now 17 years old. I haven’t had suicidal thoughts in over 2 years, I’m at a healthy weight, I live with my boyfriend and I’m redoing my GSCE’s that I failed. Life is good, I’m actually happy! I have a mental health review coming up in April, before my 18th birthday. It’s something that I’m really looking forward to, but I feel as though I’m getting my hopes up. In an ideal situation, they’d realise that I was just an out of control teenager who needed somebody to listen & remove the diagnosis from my records. Or at least change it to incorrect. But life isn’t perfect and I have a feeling that I’ll have to fight for this. I’m so angry at myself for feeling the need to amplify everything just to be heard, I’m upset at those around me for not taking the time to explain my situation. 

Any tips on how to get it removed would be so appreciated, and please don’t judge.",3.4089644828074164,4.859537160209428,4.542165699731147,85.48344806848733,73.20942408376963,7.423942266874204,26.20383472477713,8.00916892397051,1.4823021083911132,3728,127,765,54,74,1222,358,955,0.078,0.8420000000000001,0.08,0.5489,4,0,3,0,3,1,112.0,3,10,16,10,41,34,3,7,32,2,89,19,5,8,9,146,176,64,2,25,21,5,6,3,1,11,13,8,3,2,65,54,1,3,21,1,3,23,22,18,0,7,69,21,139,17,105,74,16,126,0,4,8,1,71,53,1,10,54,532,204,18,0.04827269814335986,0.0,0.04710718996749655,0.0,0.0,0.047171521938478116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05230344827021015,0.0,0.13130836031535256,0.0,0.03692848195148515,0.0,0.1914941811891188,0.0,0.0,0.03972431747154074,0.0429729357539168,0.0,0.0,0.090707577891477,0.07423745035282729,0.04030568659775699,0.058853177474413834,0.0,0.1643060426711246,0.054386800255331165,0.05065921851265218,0.0,0.05270128385334372,0.05362008533646364,0.06079777344565255,0.0,0.09858364403115916,0.16563332004745202,0.04921723296383807,0.0,0.05106611390432172,0.08316531018739656,0.050613005576797016,0.0,0.054141935678615916,0.03854182148227516,0.0,0.0,0.155659484008944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05043469523974782,0.0,0.24704576019545235,0.0,0.04939973012347496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376732370606024,0.04366541913479398,0.12201549051053905,0.0,0.17353755379882818,0.0,0.045507203649444265,0.0,0.0732243798407196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04106073238062262,0.0,0.0,0.037295366839954665,0.0,0.1008819695910578,0.0,0.05486897359927334,0.04048884891999945,0.11582425950043015,0.053220820120649236,0.05317781931702128,0.0,0.0,0.1027743696015623,0.0432428558122376,0.0,0.04954171496883874,0.051311620793259405,0.0,0.0,0.0323561720206886,0.0,0.0,0.04794568133374951,0.0,0.055700212440921056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05038415522095447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02652941245947094,0.03934869185803346,0.0,0.0,0.157345283330307,0.0,0.17048217145971142,0.0707508058940362,0.0,0.0426256768574146,0.0,0.08107381730145279,0.05400480154444138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045676794168258684,0.06444480170867388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725932966803663,0.04864752586873226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03548598746320577,0.10738078203649244,0.11169264217680934,0.04662207267307865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10130815271918442,0.05140884807224238,0.19626497741512805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720223719905812,0.0,0.09216350509497097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05298892654222026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04852739464276901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030924726523716577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183678054196054,0.11516516126349505,0.048329392081782066,0.2442727383871809,0.07693418106592077,0.04394565139396594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986334948097146,0.10852107051980726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148804426422908,0.0,0.0,0.13667065681633564,0.05145227333395872,0.038550639093673435,0.040358137156187086,0.0,0.1513953156776778,0.0,0.10560499358576984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518024556959286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16035117836056575,0.09279358741243256,0.04742768083197555,0.07664626042624091,0.11259279394459346,0.0,0.0,0.1845065270280492,0.0,0.03277399333621426,0.052506833725753335,0.0,0.10050716239074728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388995226974373,0.0,0.0,0.058783141598016016,0.0,0.04474927480236223,0.0,0.0,0.055511220534565996,0.0,0.0,0.03514309917342607,0.0,0.049194003460061926,0.24004077824769984,0.10555723488931006,0.0,0.09325810476523867
mentalhealth,InbredUnicorn,2020/03/26,"Pratices for defeating ""entitlement syndrome"" I've been reading feeling good: the new mood theraphy for a few days now. And base on what i read entilement syndrome is my main problem now. Ive done some self activating practices in the past but stop halfwaythrough because of entitlement syndrome i want to be instantly good i hate this mindset and if someone can give me advice that would be greatly appreciated",6.615416666666667,9.254558597222225,6.626111111111111,68.93000000000002,67.19444444444444,9.244444444444444,41.16666666666667,9.725611199111238,4.748066666666666,337,21,51,8,6,107,59,72,0.14,0.696,0.16399999999999998,0.2238,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,7,1,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,10,12,4,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,6,3,6,7,3,8,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,2,6,34,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22365698653276225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13952193803469545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760741094633556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23422171515597676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572762168712045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21956068606994253,0.0,0.3839441071855959,0.0,0.252338863785463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22596969466550035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210518518688403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184900017082544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21900538809778486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4578799855537889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387697279440775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19392763336976998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913523025651168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499820693845954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625884035283552,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lizzstomania,2020/03/26,"Should I start taking antidepressants I stopped a couple years ago? I was diagnosed with major depression in 2017.  They prescribed me medication that had a side effect of being suicidal for a week or two after taking, and me being me I just never made it through that week and I stopped taking them. Well, things have gotten bad enough that I feel like I can’t keep going through life like this. I go through a cycle of letting my life fall apart; messy room, missing school and homework deadlines, don’t see my friends/ get irritated with them. Then I manage to barely pull myself together by not sleeping and working constantly. And then I realize that in the end no matter how much work I put in I feel the same lack of energy and motivation. Those meds are probably expired now, if I even find them, but Idk how else I could get new ones in the current state of society. Regardless, has anyone who’s taken antidepressants before have any advice? Do they really work to improve your mood/thought processes? (I’m pretty sure what I had was fluoxetine for reference)",5.95627705627706,7.467735565656568,6.314603174603175,74.98000000000002,67.08080808080808,9.495526695526696,31.31457431457432,9.784248007369934,3.1624634920634915,854,34,146,19,14,275,135,198,0.10400000000000001,0.7859999999999999,0.109,0.6041,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,5,5,6,8,0,0,7,0,16,5,1,5,2,34,33,13,1,5,5,0,2,2,1,1,4,0,2,0,10,8,0,3,7,0,0,5,5,3,1,2,7,3,27,5,19,21,5,29,0,2,1,0,8,7,0,2,18,105,37,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131705740169858,0.11947459551571042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165521947955764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424151304547468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253591294627578,0.0,0.0,0.11468810033627945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564961265605045,0.0,0.1076110949406725,0.14913182808191772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608606687232498,0.13679915794342135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125916382389643,0.0,0.11937533263804165,0.13926406932132085,0.0,0.08902111085488286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362979293308756,0.09628706659642712,0.0,0.0,0.12318674393612734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413091824700796,0.0,0.14083427806412688,0.0,0.15319749041970052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11979891514196607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13782197887047246,0.19039861047646625,0.13169368402742454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12753236989815162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14971051891054876,0.1357769632603704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907902167318973,0.0,0.10395086911837426,0.13017164461365352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913306131101476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13712001001677662,0.1453159493398765,0.0,0.0,0.135491418705472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634370546001377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640484975049638,0.10740244161365167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487762740000167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539818345787338,0.0,0.0,0.2253647161507615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742776228406398,0.0,0.12702882891229814,0.0,0.3040140149451241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954203623377345,0.0,0.0,0.10700049570009106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13166075965798088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162252387329419,0.0,0.12118366778887807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29436497053468624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679408825635046
mentalhealth,LokiOakenshield89,2020/03/26,"I've been on my own for 3 weeks already! I know everyones in the same position. I'm not complaining about it, it's what we have to do. I had a terrible cold at the start of the month so was is self isolation for 2 weeks before the UK's lockdown started. None of my friends or family live in the same town as me. I have been in therapy following a breakdown a few years ago. I've always loved living alone and now all I want is to see someone i know. All my friends and my immediate family are classed as essential workers and my anxiety is taking over. I'm so grateful for everything i have I just feel so lonely. I have asthma and have to stay in for 12 weeks. I just wish I wasn't on my own. Rant over hope you are all safe.",1.7306352357320094,3.1886219741935515,3.9051612903225816,88.30081885856079,77.64516129032258,8.124069478908186,25.471464019851126,8.841846274778883,1.777183622828785,566,21,129,13,13,195,91,155,0.13,0.748,0.121,-0.0984,0,5,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,1,0,1,7,8,0,0,8,0,16,2,0,0,3,21,30,10,0,3,4,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,5,3,19,5,21,25,9,21,0,1,1,1,7,10,0,2,9,88,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496388280407787,0.0,0.0,0.1748350209616019,0.18628472366072665,0.0,0.1404624560249794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291382804621436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436438671373228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130405567271128,0.15171447693564166,0.0,0.3182758519914451,0.0,0.08535480836499328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608425414965048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766524145673148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855458186008246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981225505090188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235654513775088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347415845983751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345187688011185,0.0,0.17610440856658907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14303116007779818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23896749444074464,0.17992773472098855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692321941746487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930475903473094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956781203023986,0.0,0.4062247439780665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941218048336371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870734143511168
mentalhealth,IGYKC,2020/03/26,"I feel bad for taking my meds (16 M) I suffer from health anxiety or hypochondria, depression and  social anxiety I take medication that helps prevent constant worry and panic attacks. Hell sometimes it can make me feel pretty damn normal anyway without them I would probably be a mess but I feel guilty because I'm using a drug to escape my problems instead of facing them head on.

What should I do? my mom really wants me to keep taking them but I don't know part of me is scared to stop taking them part of me thinks I'm weak, pathetic for using a drug to escape it I can't decide for myself anymore.",2.526652661064425,4.932650789915968,4.242205882352945,82.31075980392157,78.91596638655463,6.319607843137256,23.36204481792717,7.492282038375204,1.3294532212885148,480,16,85,7,12,161,78,119,0.33,0.604,0.067,-0.987,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,4,0,2,11,3,2,3,0,8,7,2,3,0,23,24,5,0,5,4,1,3,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,4,2,0,3,6,0,0,0,3,11,0,0,0,3,20,0,13,21,2,3,1,2,0,0,7,1,2,1,2,57,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21097912594642573,0.0,0.1367551305797785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15687586436329898,0.0,0.0,0.11513685480271073,0.08405972359650665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14901588182304526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187690602597006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198296471512482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091720921138866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415204087693645,0.1465763055204729,0.0,0.0,0.0924283443449608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256772026906347,0.0,0.0,0.07578367640355027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204621485760756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15317064417001974,0.13891505471613633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150136372787566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13510816204717685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16179047842223793,0.0,0.29865444586589546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140289142110437,0.14867450684521347,0.1319472238485355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833929026215466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805729832507266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14056694063517644,0.0,0.0,0.13638202409890704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528668458704253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4147205584459221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835777034931222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23819461057304644,0.0,0.0,0.08133424837066831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292619364357589,0.0,0.0,0.14003941841736414,0.0,0.09795689805564603,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,285elmstreet,2020/03/26,"Is this common? * I can't follow movie plots (I have to put a massive amount of effort for the words to come out of the mouths of the actors to make some sense, and if I don't, it's like they are making meaningless sounds) 
* The same has happened with teachers. This has made having a general idea of what I'm doing impossible most of the time (I knew what I was doing, but I didn't picture it as a piece of the bigger project to which it belongs) 
* I'm unable to read if I'm not using a highlighter pen

Does this happen to everybody? I assume it does, but just in case",1.4337967914438536,3.2542734033613456,3.2055614973262045,91.34866310160429,79.67226890756302,5.671810542398777,20.06187929717341,6.574015621080383,0.14514453781512593,441,11,96,4,11,147,77,119,0.037000000000000005,0.963,0.0,-0.4339,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,10,0,12,1,1,4,0,22,24,6,0,2,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,10,4,0,0,3,2,0,3,4,0,0,0,4,1,8,1,17,20,5,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,5,3,68,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22842657663129265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4641165046813614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4689904374935968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993526492551348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12955212814784864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509169676596416,0.3540155240886905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665762108289074,0.0,0.0,0.2652488436967466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546268896019441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22902785852619226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meliveeee,2020/03/26,"Calling all mental health workers Do any of you work at mental health facilities? On inpatient units? Outpatient units? I’m curious to know how you’re all dealing with this pandemic. You personally and also how your supervisors are handling admissions, etc?? I’m wondering because right now... my unit is kind of a shit show and it’s making my anxiety go crazy.",3.646346153846157,6.790866000000001,5.1879807692307685,72.33889423076926,81.30769230769229,9.403846153846157,31.20192307692308,9.516144504307137,4.139346153846153,290,15,46,10,8,97,53,65,0.133,0.833,0.034,-0.7686,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,0,2,4,2,1,0,1,0,3,3,1,3,2,10,9,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,6,9,3,5,0,0,0,0,6,3,1,1,1,26,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770720562712602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15057537167110213,0.0,0.16938814502717775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13497753000574286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22609784792123144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282776007030081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469454030831042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583990955458593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4707250233533428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305781934850161,0.12168840222228396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478017080747825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4462850207540038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19333820107493896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18909420641269628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272877370081574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401240194977978,0.1611987296773617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Clauds609,2020/03/26,"ANXIETY spiral ruining relationship !! Trigger Warning - mention of self harm

  I (f17) have a boyfriend (m18) and in parallel with a lot of these posts actually, he is wonderfully sweet, patient, fun, kind. Dream boyfriend - we love each other immensely :3. However, I have this gut feeling I know I’ll ruin it.

  I don’t know where to start, but he pulled me out of a dark place. And even tho I’m not deeply low like I used to be my anxiety’s pretty bad. I have no hobbies and no talents, unlike him, who I love to watch geek out over all his interests and sports :} But I feel so boring and like he one day will find a girl so much more fun ... it got to the point where if I saw a girl playing sports I would get a panic attack... or a really well dressed pretty girl walk past i would start to tear up. He showed me his best friends girlfriend and I cut myself. I hate my body, I hate myself ... BUT I CAN’T tell him this because I’ll look like a needy, attention-seeking PSYCHO.

  This is where the problem comes I tell him stuff, he doesn’t no how to react, but try’s his best, then I’ll hate myself for telling him and the cycle begins.

Example:

I fucking hate myself he I don’t deserve him - - - Now I’m having a panic attack on the floor - - - fuck I’m so sad I should call him coz I’m sad - - - no don’t tell him that’s dumb he will think ur crazy - - -
What do I do I need him but I’m alone I can’t tell him who do I go to fuck - - -
Tell him - - -
Now he will hate you why can’t he have a fun girlfriend he deserves to be happy and have fun not deal with ur crying ass every day you are a chore - - -

Round and round and round

Yesterday I told him I hated my body and didn’t want to eat, he was a bit overwhelmed and tried to help but I think I lay too much on him. FaceTime was silent for a while. Then I started crying muted myself and cut myself for the first time in over a month, unmuted him. He was like what are you dabbing that tissues for, I lied. He hung up he was overwhelmed I wouldn’t tell him the truth and then he didn’t text me.
I went out for a smoke and had a panic attack he called me apologising but he should be I’m the one doing terrible shit and ruining his life.

I need help. I don’t know. I see a Councellor at school..... that’s about it. Quarantines also a bitch. Anyways that’s all",0.7012275242047004,2.6129504834024893,2.5499014522821604,94.6663597856155,82.54771784232365,5.676417704011066,19.792704011065005,6.816661863887847,0.11039820193637606,1751,47,407,20,48,581,218,482,0.272,0.597,0.131,-0.9981,2,2,1,0,0,2,83.0,1,3,0,3,16,55,17,5,25,0,40,12,5,5,3,62,82,35,0,10,11,0,5,4,3,8,1,0,1,4,17,24,1,0,9,5,0,5,17,34,1,3,11,10,69,21,33,60,10,42,0,8,7,6,67,19,7,4,21,246,86,1,0.0,0.0,0.07005010882766595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434581070709091,0.0,0.05740504866690616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982799786304072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449914703945187,0.0,0.0,0.059936025360349476,0.04375841023186933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15066420953507725,0.0,0.07836873037495327,0.15947004335260395,0.0,0.0,0.14659747265280532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06183492406714794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15770108519467466,0.09258853098568157,0.07400539110386811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345219771152138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04741216753048357,0.0,0.060480494200720915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259154820060335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656086009817984,0.061058805965520414,0.0,0.0,0.05545957013587894,0.1990874069877094,0.037503791637109415,0.0,0.040796082026368516,0.0,0.057411632127262524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641461717682248,0.0,0.42522665919467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962296147513708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475122104109766,0.11835061046109376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050702640816273035,0.14027870355366026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060279860982576976,0.0,0.0,0.061027562337486435,0.12957439307637664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05729671485625501,0.0,0.10553791407935503,0.10645275838424796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972843921594938,0.0,0.0,0.25266657407989296,0.0,0.0,0.06852524600062618,0.0,0.0,0.07499823047547946,0.0,0.06785838496721101,0.0,0.06874852224579361,0.14605876795437464,0.0,0.0686868871688802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045986195736720095,0.0,0.0,0.07706835922539566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264849344425184,0.05720196598389364,0.0,0.074885597587747,0.0,0.0736844868642434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524256868771844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217466096652573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4391921445910593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199163158512183,0.0,0.0,0.041857397323379814,0.0,0.0,0.06859198302131499,0.0,0.09747224580804333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06199769068065843,0.0,0.0,0.04233962775309864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06454177333880802,0.06654380301664155,0.06477322876036129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784588554304532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198553948941363,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ceru_blu,2020/03/26,"movement hallucinations? sometimes when im laying in bed i relive feelings of movement from my day
for example: lets say i go on a boat ride or ride a swing, that night i might feel like im rocking back and forth while laying in bed, the feeling is usually prominent in my legs (i.e. legs move a lot when ur on a swing)
i know im not moving but i feel like i am
i feel like its happened before, but it was really prominent tonight, that i was moving to the beat of the music i listened to.
it was a rocking motion again but this time more prominent on my back and neck
it just kinda rocked to the beat of the song
again, i knew i wasn't moving, since i didn't feel anything different touch-wise, but that same feeling that my center of gravity was swinging remained
this doesn't harm me in any way, no dizziness, nothing changes visually, so im not that comcerned about it, just curious
maybe my sense of placebo is really strong??

also i get sleep paralysis a lot, but without the demon, for context if thats relevant as a symptom of some sort

tldr: i feel like im moving when im not, while laying down, 

thanks :)",2.7867859649122835,4.540669128888889,4.289754385964915,85.39926315789475,75.48888888888891,7.225730994152047,26.953216374269005,8.032893268588372,1.7255777777777783,874,34,175,14,19,291,120,225,0.013000000000000001,0.8,0.188,0.9893,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,3,12,7,0,0,13,0,12,5,4,0,0,32,27,17,0,1,13,0,8,4,0,1,1,3,2,0,13,2,0,0,10,4,0,11,8,1,0,0,7,11,20,6,23,18,5,35,1,0,0,0,3,9,0,8,18,112,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135130798226294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060674450530974526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342262532302506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372133959531792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759218897718864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943857160185592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05754121757058259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321866220915924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3609091557521143,0.2549626695413927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04661514361096055,0.0,0.050707278901954485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889928037129762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5782545308468282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04903442614079425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123618803752448,0.0,0.1743586881824207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151707785181586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08963612794853698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465111468298626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4741476977244744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372939767636949,0.0,0.08561152344002831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143166077249554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095341949989199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738058846471572,0.0,0.08928706927860071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824346620503343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273647921248447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214421372689823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052026435254608115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826612580739366,0.0,0.0,0.07082077370657502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600743502709622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AwaySituation,2020/03/26,"Finding a Career with Anhedonia/Depression? My boyfriend suffers from anhedonia (lack of emotional motivation; difficulty in experiencing positive stimulation or feelings), possibly trauma-related sleep problems and a lack of energy.

On the other hand, he is ideally motivated to create positive change in his environment, interested in many things, idealistic and intelligent.

Finding a job is very relevant to his life because it would significantly improve his well-being a if he could make himself useful.

Current considerations ideally include:

* A profession in nature, due to the better well-being and the positive stimulation from the outside world
* A varied job / a job that takes place from place to place

Since this probably excludes most conventional jobs (and therefore also excludes most jobs that I know of) I upload this question to hopefully get some input. Personal experiences with depression (anhedonia) and career choices could also help us.

He has the higher education entrance qualification (Europe).

The current consideration is becoming an arborist. 

​

Thank you so much for reading this. Any input is welcome!",9.40372881355932,12.818468242937858,10.078666666666667,43.820711864406796,61.485875706214685,13.081581920903954,45.13333333333334,12.10132525352546,7.618750960451977,937,59,100,37,15,316,116,177,0.067,0.653,0.28,0.9912,7,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,1,0,5,3,10,0,0,14,0,8,3,2,7,0,35,16,10,0,10,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,9,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,9,7,19,13,6,12,1,2,0,0,13,9,0,7,3,74,17,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18172421454947815,0.0,0.12310754001240655,0.13806109237482686,0.07726569545651113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926187603691196,0.12548468694273182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048791591717343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019520449734848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181433117211228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19572198376987696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278075367692642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114244859419964,0.0,0.0,0.05744983405653905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076937788222941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05936191359602507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615728739540764,0.0,0.0,0.11285058783740773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5637530445960929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06244274161403837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025337310822032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07584242786398508,0.11519314370771888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352398868497794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920885732226864,0.35612707006416106,0.0,0.0,0.12808980861242278,0.0,0.0,0.12250189296827685,0.10871927566023702,0.0,0.0,0.12728073140315255,0.0,0.11365104028057298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398788050226194,0.0,0.1137023482324392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542832012783969,0.0,0.0,0.1046063004410225,0.0,0.0,0.07548427401603353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667122280014152,0.09813145275947872,0.0,0.09374864101761513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043165773394242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071259623285906,0.0,0.13806109237482686,0.0
mentalhealth,annyy3,2020/03/26,"nihilistic delusion? So, recently I’ve been reading a lot of philosophy books, watching TED talks, etc...

Mainly any philosophy related. 

Not for any reason in particular, just to “expand my knowledge” if you will. 

I’ve came across people like nick Bostrom and Elon musk talking about the simulation theory and reality may just be created by our own brain.

Really deep stuff haha. 

I got really really deep into it and a couple weeks ago I saw this video with these odd looking room and I was like “where have I seen these rooms?” When I looked in the comments of this video everyone said the same thing. Wondering where they have seen the rooms. Then it made me think of the philosophy books and reality isn’t real stuff. It kinda made me fall into an existential crisis, and I thought I was going crazy for about 30 minutes. I keep thinking about it... and I don’t really think I’m crazy, I’m not acting manic or acting different or having crazy thoughts, etc..  but I’m worried I’m gonna think about it so much that I end up getting psychosis or something. I don’t know if there is a simple explanation like a stupid internet trend that makes you believe that stuff. Kinda like the power of suggestion. Any tips? Just wanna feel normal again lol.",3.0720425531914866,5.772007863829793,4.395148936170216,80.29400000000003,78.87234042553192,7.674893617021277,24.293617021276606,8.608573733854374,2.059275744680852,988,35,177,23,25,325,142,235,0.07200000000000001,0.843,0.084,0.4257,2,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,1,2,1,1,14,6,1,0,11,2,13,1,1,4,0,45,41,17,0,4,11,0,1,4,0,3,0,1,3,0,16,11,0,1,11,5,0,5,5,1,0,0,13,8,18,5,20,24,7,25,0,0,6,0,9,13,0,10,11,111,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384478521446493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389943202457899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198587229987854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13077610198561976,0.0,0.13398629891661998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962222294170336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223949049060694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103758508025856,0.0,0.2613023546178223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194009759946813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05923363513157875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06120508419917759,0.0,0.06657800522093799,0.0,0.09369409398287026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412667695709002,0.0,0.0,0.06438157105451905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22893071573749266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19674991812308956,0.0,0.0,0.09959518566758722,0.0,0.2216968637190116,0.07819731376712369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611738487583966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478033460089945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812157913934666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717987289012148,0.13334026551839814,0.3001924721958858,0.12044783071773227,0.11566968593405065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143473721691342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018638532474524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40231988478613945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18831852460152695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782803934363877,0.30025527078792524,0.0,0.186005124283616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396919645237953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270421941686336,0.0,0.11896965408831335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gardengnomevengence,2020/03/26,"Quarantined in NYC since March 13 (13 days)... alone. Growing depression and loneliness. I’m in NYC and I’m self isolating and it’s taking a toll on my mental health.

Everyone is posting throwback pictures with their friends, screenshots of them FaceTiming with friends, group chats, tagging friends and I have no one.
It’s really has hit me that I truly have no friends. I don’t have anyone and I never have had a friend.

That unless someone has to speak to me, coworker, a social pleasantries from a neighbor ect. I actually have no one who wants to speak to me.

People usually don’t initiate conversations with me. Clearly, no one wants me as a quarantine buddy. No one tags me, no one is texting me, DMing, FaceTime calls, no one is sending me memes, no one would even notice if I got covid-19 and died because no one is thinking about me.

I tried reaching out to others, playing their social media games (ex: like this and I’ll write a memory we share!, send me a movie to watch, take this poll!) and It just doesn’t work. I’ve had some short conversation but they usually don’t go any longer than a few texts, small talk.

People agree that I’m nice and funny but no one wants to be my friend. I have never had any friends and I don’t know why.

This is the worst I have felt mentally in a long time.",2.456406250000001,4.737344515625004,3.4301625000000016,88.70858750000002,78.453125,6.752250000000001,25.08375,7.839951260653429,1.4159951874999996,1020,38,206,17,25,326,142,256,0.139,0.73,0.131,0.233,0,3,0,0,1,0,42.0,1,0,4,1,3,13,0,0,10,0,24,1,0,0,3,32,38,15,1,5,5,1,1,1,8,1,1,2,1,1,11,15,0,0,3,3,0,4,17,2,0,9,5,4,27,11,21,30,3,20,0,1,1,0,31,7,0,2,9,132,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.09232188615193436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979833662908245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867075599495156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615077023722513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057670987743287536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660338439808644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06101309448115354,0.0,0.08148407733764693,0.0,0.09818617377612476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062486423022329374,0.0,0.0,0.09040016287495403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09083667219102601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5116469544538902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05376681497453807,0.0,0.0756651239199292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056183814859536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199302693391259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04621975153130356,0.0,0.0,0.083723402961273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19068135237636905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14593208102869334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770964814841838,0.0,0.0,0.5769677488627655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311758865220528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906064722826408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606070768256864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869477336464988,0.0,0.0,0.07825912629878556,0.0,0.0,0.19287796732226187,0.08015942384896918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226399528643047,0.07604078280002308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06061975548836051,0.0,0.0,0.05516556554983032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423131763151163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083904606581903,0.0,0.16740334991141642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536727139166858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887435236858395,0.0,0.0,0.06720544424169866,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,litleputt,2020/03/26,"Don’t understand what happened Something really weird happened to me again last night and I don’t understand it.
I was playing a card game with my friend and everything went as normal until he asked me to keep playing. Apparently I had been ‘paused’ for a solid minute staring at my cards. Only that’s not what I experienced; In my head we had kept playing but when I looked at my cards, a lot of the ones I had put down were still in my hand. It honestly felt like I had a psychic episode or had looked into a parallel universe or something. Stuff like this has happened to me before, but I’ve always been fine, so I shrugged it off and kept playing, but then my body started shaking and I was struggling to breathe. Physically it felt like a panic attack, but my head was completely clear the whole time. I managed to calm myself down but I really don’t understand what happened to me and I want to find out now. Has anyone experienced something similar? Thanks",5.120942928039703,6.346138075268819,5.65989247311828,79.96753101736975,68.78494623655914,8.733829611248968,32.049627791563275,9.057496981413335,2.7607945409429284,766,33,143,14,13,247,105,186,0.079,0.71,0.21100000000000002,0.9694,1,0,3,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,0,5,17,1,3,8,0,16,5,5,0,1,30,35,17,0,2,8,0,3,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,3,6,5,0,3,4,5,0,1,16,8,25,12,21,19,2,22,0,0,3,0,5,9,0,3,13,102,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290373705319056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647326724716711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561519401590364,0.1406930118769633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052344601647419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137370011294461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296661335785515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111470430146204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374860882813328,0.0,0.11303256797837025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554749739556324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4374455484291522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538431597828257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992399495955853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008079381269559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18125743261633093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20770409313041485,0.0,0.0,0.10514021005233573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605635727542835,0.1211708016700192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380231025695158,0.09405696430603612,0.0,0.14510064881315698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432297912876833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845293811765634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28562270655991806,0.0,0.0,0.08753459432539411,0.0,0.09876339611316017,0.0,0.0,0.1292872256982916,0.14157309884378125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385915199397878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211324487265257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862359583956723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294404667322069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11464376355326515,0.0,0.13807366185714076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ogateno,2020/03/26,"Idk what's wrong with me So lately I've been feeling empty and very unmotivated to do anything. I feel as I've forgotten almost everything I've learned at school, making it very hard to do online stuff. It's very strange to me as I can't remember most things to do with school (I'm 15 if that matters) and I get upset and annoyed somewhat easily. If anyone knows how to help of what I can do please respond",2.7371428571428567,4.413014619047623,4.401904761904763,84.87642857142858,75.42857142857143,7.180952380952381,26.285714285714285,7.957251820313856,1.5667571428571434,324,12,66,5,7,109,56,84,0.225,0.6779999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.8509,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,1,0,0,7,0,0,2,0,18,13,9,0,2,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,6,0,11,12,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,5,1,40,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20787903110431732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14515708424736593,0.0,0.17083515451266476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18657535675856404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099351906741639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846118926383826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18596669306011285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13914831011389325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409022395138327,0.0,0.23417916002846914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138573024764072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22787984865405764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351676370851083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4201997533173702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23764960999204815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791863561225656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5138693388071665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269754105298856,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bbxgang,2020/03/26,"neutral Why do I just feel neutral all the time. When it’s not that it’s just sadness, anger, envy, or betrayal.",2.1360869565217366,3.8675645652173967,3.77326086956522,88.49293478260874,77.26086956521739,6.339130434782609,28.89130434782609,7.1686216300943375,1.5856260869565215,87,4,18,1,2,29,19,23,0.439,0.561,0.0,-0.91,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,2,2,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4258320750133545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4910825791348835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7599374608216466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bekycheppy,2020/03/26,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me I’m so stressed at the moment. I’m constantly spacing out, it’s not a regular spacing though it’s more like blacking out. I have severe anxiety and depression and the more anxious I become the worse it gets.
I will be just sitting there having a conversation with someone and next thing I know they’ve asked me a question and I have no idea what happened. It’s so stressful because people get really angry at me because I have to get them to repeat stuff or they’ll have a conversation with me about something and I’ll have no memory of that conversation later (it could be a minute later and I don’t remember even talking).
I struggle remembering a lot of my past, there are so many blank spots.
I don’t know what to do, I just want to break down and cry.",2.0316847826086963,4.2669578012422384,3.725679347826088,86.2737364130435,79.6832298136646,6.757919254658388,24.96933229813665,7.865858978985527,1.4834748447204968,630,24,127,11,16,210,88,161,0.235,0.7390000000000001,0.026000000000000002,-0.9851,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,10,6,0,3,9,0,16,0,0,0,0,26,27,12,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,11,12,0,0,7,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,0,1,18,1,15,22,3,16,0,1,1,0,8,7,0,3,8,91,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659749521497,0.17218621271866574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424879850037615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18582223574675735,0.16833102432320418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647070864463538,0.0,0.1216914318806727,0.0,0.16742134869208455,0.0,0.0,0.13127530861828873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066904768055036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388925365681812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478058674528812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720586284274266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512908366796318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446254955296906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957826867607716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452546719250113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16209568968140792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454979094242672,0.10566576654666324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707403223110186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764131809182826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3453142623231881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218621271866574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12914121934317924,0.11733695349028582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34918304498024844,0.1593378485698173,0.17447936455665067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250586317969292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125813336260878,0.0,0.14974752539593622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989865317406147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553244888478041,0.0,0.16664250111988174,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clean_the_plastic_up,2020/03/26,"What’s wrong with my older brother? I’m 21 years old and I live with my 24 year old brother. Growing up, he was “normal” and we did a lot of things together. Baseball, collecting cards, playing with toys, anything. You name it. Around 7-8th grade, he was I suppose diagnosed with a learning disorder and had to be placed in lower level classes. From this point, for a few years, he became very hostile and aggressive towards me and my family and lost all of his friends due to bullying. He would fight me and stuff and I clearly remember when I was maybe 12, he curb stomped my head into the ground. From that point forward, things were never the same between us. Throughout high school he had really bad OCD, but that has since calmed down a lot. He had to walk in certain spaces throughout the house, couldn’t touch door knobs, etc. Nowadays he doesn’t ever pick a fight with me, but his topics of conversation he has with me are reduced to... sports. He will not communicate with me about anything besides sports. He blames my parents for all of his struggles even though they’ve done nothing but try to help him over the years. He sits in his room all day and repeats phrases aloud to himself. It took him 7 years to get his license after failing countless times, and blames my parents for this. He has no car, but refuses to walk and get a job in town because he “doesn’t like walking”. He will demand my parents buy him a car when they are in no position to do so, and when they tell him they will try and save up and do it, he yells at them and expects it immediately. Unbelievable. He goes to bed at 7 am every night, wakes up at 3pm, showers, and then does nothing but occasionally yell at my parents for something that isn’t even their fault. It drives me insane. What is wrong with him? How would you diagnose someone like this? Obviously his troubled past didn’t help him, but it’s no excuse for his behavior now as an adult. He never went to college and is completely irresponsible for his own actions. He can easily walk in to town, get a job, buy a car, go to community college, and get his life started. My parents take him to their 2nd job sometimes, which is the only way he makes money. And he will YELL at them for giving him this opportunity saying he’s embarrassed to work with them. If I had to work with my parents, I wouldn’t mind it. A psychiatrist diagnosed him as “multiply handicapped” a few years ago in an email I read on my moms account, which said ADHD, amongst a few other things. But I don’t buy it. I think he’s just insecure, lazy and lacks confidence. I’ve tried to tell him things to help him when he yells or refuses to walk to get a job and get his life started, but he just acknowledges it and does nothing about it. Then at night when I want to go to sleep I have to listen to him scream phrases out loud in his room all night. Someone tell me how to approach this",4.26628655344145,5.437350268760909,4.893646618141574,84.86965138551909,70.74520069808028,7.893908823904995,29.15885582939599,8.25429008570747,1.9031355637849583,2276,87,463,33,41,730,262,573,0.128,0.785,0.087,-0.977,12,0,1,0,2,0,69.0,2,2,8,5,18,23,4,3,20,0,37,8,3,4,10,84,58,45,0,9,13,9,1,2,1,7,5,9,5,1,28,36,0,3,4,5,5,17,13,15,0,0,15,10,65,8,78,34,13,86,0,2,0,0,90,36,0,4,35,296,93,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182624581263473,0.0,0.060354208319412135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205809708830868,0.06061105279319087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056849038944698775,0.04150464687095061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138696715077697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04390989369241325,0.0,0.0,0.20731783625126565,0.0,0.0,0.0780325547573327,0.0,0.11916518765515152,0.06967570630103892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593398509316861,0.08994043706395438,0.061587763972457424,0.057365465086144714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418550360771089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052603142159583,0.0,0.21343302281392407,0.06531437901766028,0.07738978492365703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987596841502293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13691000738897194,0.07193668942685301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856220334075968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702597431916437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961824340213998,0.06652684619548976,0.0,0.060121262488210786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432400720432605,0.11576871329605865,0.0,0.0,0.04544799197545084,0.0,0.0684016260933625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687475390197028,0.07974160256435814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502437581266916,0.0,0.0,0.1916825419825029,0.06670990951705065,0.1959913111928504,0.0,0.14288979063487556,0.0,0.0,0.051782537474592084,0.0,0.0,0.4536092550643146,0.0,0.06499587443717585,0.0,0.0,0.07113546985223658,0.0,0.12872671974933395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810451237052104,0.0,0.04361769097362946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077128264330857,0.0,0.06476546058734313,0.05414478940303581,0.0,0.06890675529876153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05632151500367314,0.0,0.0681352582663259,0.0,0.1153782416573074,0.05241599639522635,0.06733888130469479,0.0,0.0963833660680253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117836152913333,0.07794228051438144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051192264237759036,0.0,0.1785307239698008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18093348413929145,0.043626815551474865,0.06689423508849908,0.0,0.039701545043304386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564614821161278,0.1386779519826437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189917981311723,0.0,0.0,0.0561781525812842,0.04015893834415448,0.054043566958860915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06311648506015251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913496492371823,0.0,0.0,0.09673280587713608,0.14888289627724766,0.0,0.2630712476190836
mentalhealth,nothingtoseeiguess,2020/03/26,"I just have to vent. For people being paid to listen, I keep running into therapists/psychologists/psychiatrists who really don’t pay attention to what I’m saying.

I’m SOOoOOOOo sick of telling people I don’t hate myself and I’m not depressed. I know it’s the most common thing associated with some of my other problems. I’m also the one living in my head and That’s. Not. The. Problem! 

I had a short bout of depressed once before and nobody listened to me *then!* But now I can clearly compare the two and I know what the hell I’m talking about when I say, that’s not how I feel. Thats nothing like how I feel now. I feel normal now. That’s not the problem!

Just had a session recently where I repeated over and over that Yes, I’ve tried these techniques. Yes, I stuck with them for years. Yes, I got exactly the results she was trying to advise me to get. It. Didn’t. Help. 
That. Wasn’t. The. Problem.

*Sigh*

But I guess I’m going back next week to report on my ‘progress’ on yet another thing that I’ve done a dozen times before. Maybe something magical will happen this time?

I feel like I’m screaming into the wind here and nobody listens. Something is wrong and I don’t know what. I can fake success. But I can’t feel it. I can achieve success but I can’t believe that it matters. I can care about people but I can’t feel connected to them and no amount of faking it has gotten me to ‘make it’ yet. It’s been decades. 

I’m just so goddamn tired of this. I kind of know that I’m just going to go back to being mildly uncomfortable just scraping out a meager life being whatever it is that I am. I’m fine with that. I’m used to it. It has its ups and downs like anything else. I get left alone to do whatever I like. I save a lot of money and learn/do a lot of weird stuff. 

But it’s really not much of a life all alone. Even I can see that. I see I’m missing things. I don’t know why. I know something is different. Possibly many things. I can’t know. How could I know? I feel like every MH person asks me to describe my favorite colors and I’m color blind. How the fuck should I know?! I’ve tried to explain how disconnected things are for me between conversations and reality for me but hey just can’t seem to understand? 

I’m trying really hard to be open to the idea they’re trying to point me at some realization or understanding but it just really doesn’t seem so. I feel like I’m drowning and someone’s trying to Life Coach me on calming breathing techniques. Like... really?? *Really?!* I mean I don’t have a better idea but.... really?!?!?!

Obviously I’ve googled a bunch of possible things that might describe the things going on in my head just trying to pinpoint what everyone else thinks is normal. And I’m not trying to self diagnose but I can’t help but laugh/cry when I think of how many of them said things like ‘these people rarely seek out help’ or ‘we don’t know much about this because we only know about how the symptoms look in men/boys.”

Whatever. I’m fine right now. I’m not good, but I’m fine. Soon enough I’ll find some new distraction to consume my focus for a few weeks or years. Five years is a respectable effort to try to figure myself out I think. I was too tired to fight this fight when I started it and I haven’t really gotten anywhere at all. So I feel justified in throwing in the towel.

I must be fine enough that nobody’s been worried yet. So whatever.

And thanks for reading all this word vomit for anyone who actually made it this far!",0.19624300353052604,2.590197022503517,2.225987686213728,92.0255018083183,92.13642756680731,5.09613364333075,19.210095008467523,6.732929213489452,0.32848906685036905,2717,85,570,39,98,903,282,711,0.138,0.7659999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.9827,2,2,3,0,2,0,99.0,2,0,3,6,41,41,5,1,25,3,50,15,3,11,7,129,129,47,1,9,30,0,10,8,0,4,11,7,0,2,53,27,0,1,34,2,3,6,24,18,1,4,16,23,69,22,73,103,16,60,1,3,6,1,28,27,2,13,35,366,122,8,0.0,0.0,0.052831763772883636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121431607891886,0.0,0.04329486450909099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056769364632694636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03785518269000567,0.0,0.044551707672301384,0.0,0.0506125699946403,0.0,0.0,0.08325895564664232,0.0,0.033002575315543375,0.0,0.0921364449763157,0.060996009004893825,0.0,0.047881463845869665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519822403532471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04322551205735667,0.0,0.059469047366004335,0.0,0.0,0.09325952284097144,0.05494985116896764,0.0,0.0565636351202916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055402898668513625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045221998603477,0.0,0.0,0.11187992671060708,0.0,0.03575823759379524,0.0,0.045614364288007817,0.05173204587891437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463683234446849,0.11603053831278175,0.0,0.0,0.04948198035019739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050050547301821936,0.056570688997321664,0.0,0.12307355431973573,0.04540914673648205,0.0432998297522316,0.0,0.05964010992913112,0.0,0.047874856819573264,0.0,0.0484978268649298,0.053450962424088526,0.11112427567609884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886450484339852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223247278337253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04812114823087908,0.0,0.05637734070468922,0.3272866028233005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05882208105542549,0.0,0.1147197336490973,0.21159628307633252,0.0,0.047805646907490125,0.0,0.04546304679595293,0.0,0.0,0.09205392571140833,0.0,0.05122754299428908,0.036138140935727814,0.1097767088786959,0.05438980902236814,0.058973141279553824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05743282501356545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959665215425417,0.0,0.0,0.05228769391181761,0.057577341974575424,0.0,0.10608926850889376,0.051947741570123614,0.0,0.0,0.057656169240041674,0.03668592462863561,0.04117507850021688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15013240604782593,0.047272005511405236,0.0,0.0,0.05117876652293196,0.12206696664214392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20721449019464164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054153557933523916,0.0,0.2774621619450165,0.0,0.05345563947023355,0.0,0.0,0.04623433091865288,0.051498498409720185,0.08610686392653542,0.0,0.0,0.08628339926324392,0.09857205555642223,0.056478687441875015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04587172036314014,0.12503632719618082,0.0,0.0,0.03831979715085742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06197609609687948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0562710539735688,0.0,0.04351480284300712,0.04731979114107075,0.04984383193642299,0.0,0.0,0.28773987433151593,0.10407007705606518,0.0,0.0,0.06313766429619456,0.1244494192885124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3308108778139581,0.0,0.05288584562042024,0.11272102336341093,0.0,0.04675863326012756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868539314566814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048851942958335934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054980688202691384,0.0,0.0,0.059192396129324774,0.0,0.10459104362335124
mentalhealth,throwaway27467321919,2020/03/26,"Oncoming breakdown Is it normal to feel like you’re going to breakdown at some point but you can’t cry or be sad now to alleviate the pain? I don’t want to get too in depth but I’m realizing that I may have to attend a school that I might not be happy at or be able to improve/become myself at. I don’t want to sound like a crybaby because I am aware that I am privileged to be able to attend college and in the grand scheme of things it is only a small portion of my life. However, right now, it is my foreseeable future. I don’t know how to describe it,  I’m aware that I’m not going to like what’s coming but at the same time I can’t bring myself to cry or be sad about the situation. I have a feeling deep down that i am going to breakdown in the future because of this scenario. However, I just can’t bring my self to cry about it now. It’s just weird because I know the logistics of it but some part of me is still in denial. Maybe it is the logical side of my personality clashing with denial. Or maybe deep down I still have hope that something will change. I’m not sure. Any advice or wisdom would be helpful :).",2.1889141972578514,3.5036960294117705,4.169212737726671,87.48213401149935,76.10084033613445,7.02733303847855,23.870853604599727,7.669130373188453,1.0146941176470592,877,27,193,12,19,300,108,238,0.132,0.738,0.129,-0.5845,2,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,0,11,13,0,0,11,0,27,2,0,1,1,35,45,11,0,5,14,0,2,3,0,4,2,1,0,2,17,3,0,0,6,0,0,8,9,4,0,0,0,3,21,9,33,35,5,33,0,2,0,0,4,17,0,10,11,135,38,2,0.2689088331500301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313872997601653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914336139094139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24588649315006056,0.14849433956008676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14223494471695075,0.11582057447170778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.443075589343925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359683858470425,0.09605426206645347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024688325905128,0.0,0.22924063032848085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312922661382066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012196125276943,0.0,0.0,0.13354357346830067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477852621257201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496913071642847,0.19706290915092134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27015506670299033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263488833082674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13173678086783142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225864255335301,0.1430689789770357,0.0,0.0,0.14560103066349572,0.0,0.0,0.1174004104046932,0.0,0.0,0.1271028831714903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482333710861192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607504775262902,0.0,0.0,0.14026527990640802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15113239764953798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103509578727911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21475094151731464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267216964192918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932553995452072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840145155866735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15860939697951273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551255984922036,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justaregulardude9,2020/03/26,Bulimia It’s hard for me to say but in the past I would throw up after I ate cuz I thought that I was too fat and that I would be too slow in sport. I realized that I have self image problems and I don’t do this anymore but I just felt like I should get it off my chest because I have no one to tell that cares irl,0.33182648401826503,1.3400194657534286,2.4097945205479436,99.45569634703196,80.36986301369862,5.962557077625571,20.38584474885845,6.42735559955562,-0.20100730593607308,243,6,66,2,6,82,51,73,0.10800000000000001,0.7879999999999999,0.10400000000000001,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,9,3,2,1,0,13,14,5,0,4,3,0,2,1,0,3,1,1,0,1,7,2,2,0,3,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,4,3,13,2,8,6,0,8,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,48,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856918974716357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17560717344507626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937105365067128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27659611657127675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505067210615737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25805762770179685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407383546103847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952063276170949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27499913036224605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756478136329371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290879248632013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30052390053586026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517892828315473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22869849558146435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092788615287419,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hayleyprince,2020/03/26,"Help! I’m begging someone help... All my life I’ve had anxiety. I am actually diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I am currently in highschool and my parents I divorced, so I switch back and forth between parents. At my moms, I feel safe and mostly happy, however at my dads house, I feel alone and extremely paranoid. Everything I fear, is right here in this house. First off, it’s an old house. Everything is old here and everything smells frankly... old. lol. It also doesn’t help that my dad has ocd, which makes this whole house feel empty and constantly a high stress area. He’s mainly always concerned about the windows being closed, the doors being closed, his car being locked, and keeping everything in this house only if it is a basic necessity. 

Right now I’m freaking the f*** out. I don’t know if I’m insane... but I feel like it. Everytime I’m here, I see things.. I see a shadow. It feels like a man.. it’s black, has holes in his socket where his eyes are supposed to be. His mouth is also the same. Just a hole. And I hear static everytime I see these “flashes” of him. I also here the sounds of static and everything around me here. I also feel... the presence I guess you could say.. I also feel like I’m CONSTANTLY being watched and stalked. So I lock everything and close the blinds and hide.. Lastly, I just feel so dirty. I feel like my feet and hands have dirt on them while I’m laying here in bed..  

I know this is a lot but please.. I need help. I’m literally sobbing. I just want to feel safe and normal. It’s 12:30 and I can’t go get help from anyone else.. they are all asleep.",0.6781461167178584,3.1815914496855378,2.3224879333040818,91.58343791136463,90.47798742138365,5.599648968845985,19.973965189410556,7.121374137718711,0.6383262249524653,1243,40,256,21,43,405,164,318,0.086,0.799,0.115,0.8968,4,1,0,0,1,0,68.0,0,1,2,1,22,11,0,2,14,1,22,8,5,1,2,55,52,28,0,6,7,5,11,4,0,0,3,3,3,1,15,21,0,3,12,0,0,2,3,4,0,1,1,22,39,7,19,45,7,32,0,1,7,0,23,19,1,5,15,157,54,1,0.0,0.0,0.07118089531878576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755459407258144,0.0,0.29165855901675963,0.060693608858810526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160090040964192,0.0,0.0,0.05100276053463528,0.07473772548119584,0.0,0.06493386770790259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056087915517188086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576488338567826,0.0,0.05823827237876216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403462092720614,0.0,0.0,0.0835978811457229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060933702969446585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3933335375986873,0.0,0.0,0.08208005829022075,0.3688167998573476,0.20843919166834154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204445001526166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038109197990629104,0.0,0.041454634300134775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035386514665749,0.0,0.0,0.07764814298104672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221096451677297,0.0,0.244457512230129,0.07706725521706348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42082652284364575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648342241528579,0.0,0.0,0.08017405973268445,0.05945748659621621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05152111008432502,0.14254315775116225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062012702035798326,0.0,0.0,0.048689368729382565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542881921879228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054085588000917485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146769837782709,0.0,0.0,0.2296211582123497,0.0,0.0,0.05547569763269994,0.0,0.0,0.16198697543349394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800684404197981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458418323500547,0.0,0.058006426718328626,0.0,0.0,0.17437605255169214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061803541886238864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355484428659699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04845944090064752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04302309677125578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143716706934832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wavywithit,2020/03/26,"How can I avoid Mental instability? Is there a clear answer to this? I’ve been blessed and grateful for not experiencing chronic depression or any severe mental breakdowns in life so far. I value my ability to think clearly and not fall under manipulation from the stress life brings. However recently I’ve been paranoid of losing my mind. Having an illogical conscious. It’s probably my biggest fear in life. In the past year, two of my friends (from different friend groups) have shown sudden signs of schizophrenic behavior and have broke the barriers of sanity(heavy delusions, not being able to articulate their thoughts or make sense at all). Their personality changes have sparked an overwhelming appreciation for my own mental stability, which is what led me here to ask this question. What mechanisms can I use to keep my mind in my control until my time here on earth is all said and done? We have such a limited time on this planet and I would hate to waste any second of it being mentally incompetent. How do I never lose my grasp of reality? HOW DO I AVOID INSANITY? We all have different experiences so I’m open to absorbing all insight from you guys. If not, thanks for reading nonetheless.",5.857710594315242,8.331865688372098,6.521356589147287,69.5820865633075,68.86046511627907,10.173126614987082,33.339793281653755,10.380263240014207,4.104018087855296,973,46,158,29,18,318,135,215,0.161,0.7040000000000001,0.135,-0.7586,3,2,0,0,0,0,23.0,2,1,2,4,9,14,1,5,7,0,19,5,0,8,7,46,30,14,0,2,7,0,0,0,2,1,5,1,0,2,8,8,0,6,7,1,0,3,5,10,0,2,5,2,21,4,28,22,5,22,1,5,0,0,13,11,0,4,8,112,29,1,0.12318078598901032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16753431704333066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515740671590967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030893838702795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381577257615076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609543047376073,0.0,0.0,0.25739540732934585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605671152217682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049444523691025,0.0,0.1386126305346551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19033833938391628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196834458470535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216155239672554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094887424022678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610186960980032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756155821938397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822241311621435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4965490393874278,0.0,0.2487549579081067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500461600930277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758999842297305,0.0,0.1075567110211967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280972140156913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13799067155491335,0.0,0.123214120459103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162616552339865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717313559170756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391592261508371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110317416597876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11340831787814662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892927383961779,0.0,0.09779178464795876,0.14365541380766475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032972904301195,0.0,0.0,0.10638864907248896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750409613718585,0.0,0.0,0.07932438753621332
mentalhealth,laurensgay,2020/03/26,"I need help. My brain constantly feels like it’s tangled wires. I know I’m thinking things but I don’t know where the thoughts begin and end, and I can’t untangle them. Inside my brain is loud like static and I don’t understand my dark cloud thoughts, and I want them out but I don’t know how. I want to just throw up and be empty, or be able to crack my head open and sort out all of the wires. I need someone to just tell me why this is happening and how I can get rid of it. All I feel is melancholy but I have no reason why. Is there anyone out there who feels the same way? I just need some help soon.",0.3816958041958039,2.1765859924242434,1.7790909090909075,100.39248251748249,83.01515151515152,5.273659673659674,17.72960372960373,6.297961479604792,-0.5315193473193469,469,10,118,4,13,150,73,132,0.07,0.8240000000000001,0.105,0.3506,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,9,2,0,0,3,0,12,3,3,3,2,41,31,13,0,5,7,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,11,0,0,11,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,4,20,2,9,27,4,12,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,3,6,74,25,0,0.1665786189995648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164756435503048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719136593208771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18001230899996368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14753921328001504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526814646809728,0.11900379869727097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703045314831899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473049226469777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095772102629836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233082739776403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746417577847616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16276379806426855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37054780583448027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17127056396136958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114152331028074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559705525545846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066743262176733,0.10673685290508712,0.0,0.2644896329467023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734142170890718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19650477077828205,0.132222354165365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3006225880007294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ttvnatec1,2020/03/26,Pls tell people how much they matter to you Pls everyone you know that you love them and that they matter everyone loves to hear that and a lot of people need to hear it.,2.570476190476189,4.342568714285719,3.457142857142859,91.0561904761905,76.14285714285714,6.9523809523809526,17.38095238095238,7.793537801064563,0.21309523809523773,135,2,29,2,3,43,22,35,0.0,0.688,0.312,0.8658,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,8,6,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,2,4,6,2,0,0,0,0,2,11,0,0,1,0,20,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4663515063312647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5500664243345731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410941782755315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20746080205151604,0.4404830618058518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17938599759782556,0.18094098624537935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383515600437432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21328806451586524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,andreajd89,2020/03/26,"Is it just depression or something else? Hi
let me preface this by saying I know that I can't get a diagnosis here but I'd like some opinions. 
I'm 30, I do see a counselor currently who helps me with techniques centered on cognitive behavioral therapy. 
I've struggled with depression and anxiety since I was a kid, and lived through a lot of abuse and childhood trauma. 
Lately though I've been wondering if it's more than just depression. I have steady relationships with family and friends but tend to have turbulent romantic relationships. 
Sometimes I go through spurts of motivation for days or weeks or even months where I'm productive, content, and take care of myself (but not manic). 
However, I feel that I am fragile in the sense that my sense of security can be skewed very easily and I still go through times of depression, like now where all I want to do is sleep I don't eat, my sleeping patterns are disregulated aaaaand I start smoking cigarettes (if I start smoking I know i'm not doing well and these are the times I take care of myself poorly).
Inside, it feels like there is a block inside of me. I can recognize when I should be feeling something, like excitement, but I can't. I withdraw from family and friends and I feel empty and kind of hopeless. My sex drive plummets and sometimes I engage in binging and purging. I feel socially inept and I feel like I just want to run away or hide. 
I've tried Wellbutrin and Prozac before when I got really desperate, even though I don't like taking anything. I was allergic to wellbutrin and prozac was horrible for me. 
I've thought about if I have borderline, but my behaviors don't seem to match the severity of people with that. I've thought about maybe Bipolar II.
The counselor I see doesn't have the ability to actually diagnose people. I've tried to keep this brief and any input would be appreciated.",5.607627118644068,7.024321706214689,6.1324000000000005,76.3168372881356,67.8135593220339,9.957785310734463,33.93401129943503,10.17224662633116,3.6402921129943504,1500,70,270,38,25,486,181,354,0.153,0.6709999999999999,0.17600000000000002,0.8072,2,0,3,0,1,1,35.0,0,0,0,1,18,22,0,1,10,0,31,9,2,1,1,60,63,32,0,7,17,0,7,6,2,2,5,1,0,1,11,20,1,3,13,0,1,5,8,7,1,0,7,10,39,15,34,50,4,26,0,5,2,1,10,7,0,12,20,175,50,1,0.0,0.11156389575288096,0.0918863243310713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403185263036641,0.0,0.07203194399813624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748544376217258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846617604630079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012300424229768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200426236052368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072524318568751,0.0,0.3243985871667872,0.09557015488185104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634892186042177,0.07865838113820514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438324153536535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17753084727907267,0.0,0.2856599648430903,0.1345354753067349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14549516436310053,0.0,0.04919457827667699,0.0,0.10702630123627714,0.0,0.07530814638703782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06311328946719869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369350401652832,0.0,0.0980528803691619,0.10349546212566234,0.0,0.10621628895072388,0.0,0.0,0.09628471450256962,0.0,0.2760101590245448,0.0,0.08314477622745763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005124445805653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459611557960987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515740678346325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055701693036306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06032114106505927,0.0,0.0,0.20218464667542105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487960519260557,0.0,0.0,0.15006624505614174,0.08571949164686599,0.0,0.10637370561807477,0.0,0.07788991062338486,0.0,0.18845548371059467,0.09598399794673056,0.0,0.14497753741864305,0.18625278265186346,0.0,0.13329349837499704,0.0,0.075196090647213,0.0,0.0,0.09843620537305506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123892203092038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767986972653633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850229345543379,0.14950463292649685,0.10981060416544522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785656641347715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769164737947358,0.11107570945675796,0.0,0.0755292644550457,0.0,0.08466091512437425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211222232994856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688837830115177,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mental_dissonance,2020/03/26,"I'm scared that it's coming back The black cloud brain feeling. What I used to have every day when I was mentally fucked up by that hormonal birth control almost four years ago. I felt dead. Like I was just existing instead of fully engaged in the world around me. The way I can tell is that I'm noticing I'm getting these periods where I'm not interested in the stuff that usually interests me. And I don't have a drive to do much. I'm afraid of getting a depression from the world on halt due to coronavirus. My county just announced a shelter in place order, so I wouldn't even be able to do evening walks under the moon. Those usually make me feel good. I'm just wishing I could force this black cloud out of me.",4.22609589041096,5.087979691780824,4.9752328767123295,85.39682191780824,70.57534246575342,8.579726027397259,28.98356164383561,8.841846274778883,2.0917364383561643,569,21,119,10,10,184,96,146,0.12,0.7859999999999999,0.094,-0.7759999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,11,9,1,2,9,0,12,2,1,3,0,19,28,3,1,3,4,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,2,3,0,0,3,3,4,0,1,3,5,13,5,17,22,1,27,0,1,2,1,1,12,1,1,11,75,23,0,0.17696232395398262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15686642288956115,0.0,0.1772022052851795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15753398651043404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607310388824634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19754847848697832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243737277134087,0.0,0.0,0.19847829372621967,0.14129001612190034,0.0,0.0,0.11412605922252385,0.0,0.1524173903161318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23376389200035905,0.0,0.1490983902536787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895493622807193,0.0,0.16991158239404247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16359881696255846,0.18491102083077016,0.0,0.0,0.14842760141200814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645485277166616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11812372537424902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17833640056282055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13008766965213825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20147277871999508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18488796402121807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17717015760495242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025795230622429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467287106594185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15283863007557047,0.38979799757299577,0.0,0.0,0.14046445583650008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034979391900864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395793468866974
mentalhealth,jk0174,2020/03/26,"I feel sad all the damn time So I (19F) have been struggling the past couple months with feeling upset and anxious all the time. I want to get help but I’m worried that because I have a good job, a good home, a bunch of good friends and realistically nothing to be upset about, that nobody would take me seriously. I can’t talk to my friends about it because they think that I’m joking about being sad (im known to use humour as a defence mechanism) and my mum is extremely judgemental and would think I’m being overly dramatic. I was looking into a therapist but I’m worried that with the job I do my boss would doubt my abilities to keep working. Advice please anyone ?",4.060000000000001,5.4939924812030085,5.212037593984963,81.3836203007519,71.55639097744361,7.726015037593986,29.089473684210525,8.238735603445708,2.052744962406016,532,21,102,8,10,176,80,133,0.17600000000000002,0.583,0.24100000000000002,0.9022,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,4,16,2,4,9,0,13,0,0,2,2,25,27,8,0,4,2,1,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,2,5,1,0,0,1,9,0,0,2,3,13,7,14,19,3,6,0,2,1,0,6,2,1,1,4,64,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711360231959875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17007620219716005,0.0,0.10526654688162318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18354512617819976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657831633870587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15224301800899118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23262576826808465,0.0,0.07865503033266955,0.0,0.0,0.3788171447699078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090904061658697,0.0,0.15101175376675122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16261749630602373,0.0,0.2987909933268033,0.133813833305862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642226524483566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016584585868305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444547083068124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14371494367518076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16525631453743433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573852849374101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131932362668,0.12100464739607132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747976403037523,0.0,0.1929299480621048,0.0,0.0,0.1755713069213709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002499289211875,0.0,0.0,0.08879701384376043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960061714397214,0.305777269108282,0.0,0.3208345883925044,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kaycko,2020/03/26,"My Mother Has Delusional Disorder My mother has delusional disorder. Her delusions are persucatory - she believes that ever since their divorce, my father has had a twisted obsession with her and that he regularly breaks into her home, car, and office to steal things of sentimental value, break household appliances, collect information on her financial records, and move her possessions around. At one time she believed it was possible that he was also poisoning her food.

I believed her delusions for several years since her accusations are non-bizzare and she has an intricate explanation and reasoning for every little thing. For years she convinced me not to discuss this with my father, saying that if he thought I ""turned on him"" and believed her accusations, that it would trigger him to do something even more dangerous and harmful toward her in order to ""punish"" her. These factors, combined with some others, led me to believe her delusions for years and distance myself from my dad.

However, over time it became clear that zero of these events were actually happening. There have been multiple occasions where camera footage shows there is nobody in her house or office building, but she believed that he somehow hacked into the system and falsified the camera footage. There was also an occasion where my father was in another state at the time of an alleged ""break in."" These are just two of many, many examples. Even when my mom is presented with evidence that shows her accusations aren't possible, she cannot accept that what she believes is happening simply isn't true.

At the same time, my mom is a perfectly fine functioning member of society. She is successful in her work,  has many close friends, and is in a loving relationship. But her delusions have not shown any signs of stopping, and it is a huge source of stress in her (and my own) life. She has encouraged me to cut off my relationship with my father, and gets extremely upset if I come to his defense in any capacity.

I believe her delusions stem from childhood trauma, and I feel quite helpless in improving the situation. She has a relatively new therapist who I'm considering reaching out to to share my views on the matter, because it often takes many months for her therapists to start to understand that she is not actually a victim of domestic violence, but rather a person with a mental illness.

From what I've read this is quite a rare illness, but I would love to hear from anyone who has experience with it. What happened and how did things progress over time?

TL;DR: Mom has delusional disorder and thinks my father has been stalking her for years. Would love to hear more testimonies from people who have experience with this illness & advice on how to best handle things as it's quite rare and often lasts forever.",10.44968413978495,9.665500836693553,9.622822580645169,62.8813172043011,57.770161290322584,13.105376344086025,42.037634408602145,12.161744961471696,5.385547311827956,2269,106,350,60,24,721,239,496,0.124,0.7490000000000001,0.127,0.6561,1,0,1,0,2,0,58.0,0,0,1,8,19,26,6,3,18,0,41,9,0,5,4,70,59,30,0,6,12,11,1,0,1,3,5,3,1,1,34,31,1,2,7,3,0,4,6,13,0,3,10,5,58,13,66,46,6,58,0,1,1,3,68,29,0,7,19,271,92,3,0.0,0.0,0.12487107235220085,0.0,0.0,0.0625208013151221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233003353501988,0.0,0.06932262015337208,0.0,0.08701758570560425,0.06708891519230423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04473650810628113,0.0,0.0,0.056956024902104725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03900179244206255,0.0,0.0,0.5766710410342116,0.06714336966993918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05511335675493019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21998087446681594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451675951908649,0.057873837473984675,0.053906155847771885,0.0,0.0,0.1251700057695072,0.0,0.0,0.03235035826216948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736522360936184,0.0,0.04943101524721818,0.0,0.033427062122919717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697326839815788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442208791044649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641774499749395,0.0,0.0,0.07382466734422413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05215247769352431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04519117268891357,0.0,0.06412506127421233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323413571674384,0.0,0.0,0.25946389781546225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447708647768507,0.0,0.0,0.22479883579416465,0.05106845903666266,0.06800092553420227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179256514755509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043354701996159616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044355878923992655,0.05586512354408691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442563330737053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20415274957396715,0.06399760643914873,0.0,0.0,0.06578239655500147,0.0,0.1373817802992333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050879696547771726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227951921739181,0.0,0.10585031815958974,0.07191652939799256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04925515493257573,0.0,0.0,0.04528558031032778,0.0,0.0,0.05349038934722627,0.0732892088499408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048105217486809335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857210166115498,0.17002265351542875,0.04099598799954319,0.0,0.05079320554789287,0.18653711525635366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695921857966639,0.06249944903660715,0.06660574084056525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046578414914935216,0.0,0.0,0.136349292245116,0.0,0.0,0.16480484268048162
mentalhealth,vagisilformen,2020/03/26,"Partner wants (and likely needs) therapy but cannot afford it. Any advice o get help? My partner recently came out of an abusive relationship.  She had being going to see a therapist about it for the past several months.  She was told that her insurance would cover it and now it is not covering it.  So she trying to work through the large bills that has been generating from multiple visits over the past few months.

My question was if anyone knows of any resources to get therapy and low cost or no cost.  We live in WA state.

​

Thanks!",3.2007754010695213,5.968954852941183,4.106755793226384,82.13494652406419,78.90196078431373,7.63065953654189,25.93939393939394,8.575989854853784,2.2655960784313733,433,17,77,10,11,139,78,102,0.102,0.8320000000000001,0.066,-0.63,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,5,0,9,0,0,0,0,15,19,7,0,4,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,2,7,6,0,0,2,0,3,3,3,1,0,0,6,1,7,2,12,11,1,14,0,1,1,0,12,4,0,3,7,51,14,1,0.0,0.1987532065980068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16392079133380774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817542084209534,0.20383141890244846,0.2281479317087705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172928634316655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185830615369046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528215761457416,0.0,0.09533469774196636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243752807215876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218956915677072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195289313738019,0.0,0.14812400351889102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677887052437099,0.0,0.0,0.12438255146414905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32026769683133266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18791544840461116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656302935156569,0.18009790076099624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336729378521198,0.0,0.0,0.1895067839521803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544392433687361,0.3836674804115931,0.19476762903015504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16028980343339214,0.0,0.11388945495224595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894174670352124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12212208531121102,0.0,0.0,0.11916292077987199,0.0,0.20383141890244846,0.0
mentalhealth,KHammondz,2020/03/26,"Pushing away for being annoying? Hi everyone

Just a brief summary of what I've been through;

​

I was originally from the UK, and left to move to Canada when I was around 11 years old, and have moved around Canada relentlessly (UK to Canada/Vancouver and then Vancouver to Ontario, Ontario to NS, NS to Alberta, Alberta to NS, NS to Ontario, Ontario to BC etc etc) the story about why I've moved so much is a hassle to explain but let's just say it was due to family reason.

​

I have been someone that has had a very hard time making friends, understandably so I suppose, but I feel my relationship with friends and family has been a very difficult thing for me to cope with.

A lot of my High School years I noticed people pushed away from me quite often, claiming that I was ""annoying"" and too suffocating to be around, I have noticed my lack of socializing has made me pretty desperate to make friends, I've had no one close beside me for most of my life, and the desperation is more out of anxiety of me not wanting to feel alone anymore. 

I have **forced** myself to be alone for most of my life, because I feel like I needed time to be alone to accept who I am as a person. 

My mindset was if I can accept myself - others can accept me too. I have learned this through many different mental health videos and whatever life advice people have given me throughout the years.

But I have a hard time with people messaging me, I'm always the one reaching out to others, and usually, with the constant checking up on others, people get put off and tend to ignore me after a while, with the most common response being ""you are trying way too hard"" 

I feel like I have suffocated myself with my own company for way too long, I have sat in a room with just myself and my own thoughts what feels like for years, over and over hours upon hours i'll sit here by myself figuring what are my flaws, how I can improve them, and understanding why I think the way that I do.

​

I notice that if I leave people alone and let them message me at their own free will, I will not receive messages up to 3 to 5 months at a time, this time period in my mind is unacceptable because I don't feel like I deserve to be alone in my own thoughts for that long, nor do I feel like that's how long any normal person should respond. Also, I want to clarify this would just be them messaging me asking me how I'm doing with life and how things are going (I would get the most attention typically during my birthday, but when I message them back after they reach out.. Crickets)

I'm in the mindset where I refuse to believe that these people are just bad people, this happens way more often than the average joe you encounter every few years or so, this is a constant trend of people pushing me away because I try too hard to be their friend because I cannot sit in my own silence. 

​

Some clarity on how I perceive myself; 

I used to be very harsh on myself, I used to self-harm quite a bit during my high school years (no longer doing this and won't anymore, I just believe it is relevant to this) and have the mindset that everything was my fault, I needed to leave everyone alone and just be by myself because no one enjoyed my presence, I was very self-conscious and insecure.

As I've gotten older I do feel a lot more confident in myself, although when I annoy people nowadays I don't quite understand why they would feel annoyed, I treat it as just messaging them and striking up a conversation because I'm kinda lonely, I really can't tell the difference and I never have, the only way I know is if someone tells me. 

​

.. I don't really know why I rambled so much, but I feel like I needed to give a lot of context

​

I am very confused on how I should approach the idea that people are annoyed by me when I check up on them and message them, I believe there is a boundary you can't cross but I don't really seem to grasp the boundary when I'm in that situation, any thoughts?",8.69702864394489,6.441752861675128,8.719251631617116,72.65025888324872,62.26142131979695,11.493023930384338,37.742712110224794,9.888512548439397,3.573754053662073,3157,120,601,49,35,1037,287,788,0.115,0.787,0.099,-0.7226,1,9,0,0,0,0,102.0,0,3,11,3,42,28,5,2,32,0,75,5,0,13,1,128,121,54,0,15,20,0,14,6,4,8,5,1,1,2,30,36,0,2,32,1,3,12,15,12,0,3,19,15,109,17,101,82,23,93,0,1,0,0,41,37,0,17,43,448,139,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039498312185977984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511798436227494,0.0,0.03232415072701727,0.03363298110524655,0.26277268698783424,0.2946910011210747,0.05497446759433525,0.0,0.030921468053889824,0.0,0.08017228021888657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079480815249021,0.03778758427214707,0.0,0.11392878844986865,0.03108076514630277,0.03374931583052835,0.1478392734531408,0.0,0.0,0.1366197269244269,0.0,0.0,0.04412856903273301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736010842103076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446135531443434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015878166992143,0.0,0.0,0.034055900238538384,0.07724678053009618,0.036327217112460036,0.0,0.07620944428296805,0.0,0.20437750685999934,0.17325789799257912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491469276368462,0.0,0.04223594411518892,0.038774896579802334,0.02297182451919637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035743594659946615,0.0,0.14483482817557775,0.0,0.0,0.04296495710916354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541266822931531,0.0,0.0,0.0796118335457587,0.0,0.0,0.04562967131074094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442795027056379,0.0,0.0,0.0855986591070842,0.04391684408004449,0.08266512211987899,0.11420039470833933,0.11848408971229955,0.0,0.0,0.10731225135171883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309184484516896,0.0,0.038246726023925016,0.0539618140786825,0.04097990517288449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04073422024298205,0.0,0.04081304539210474,0.0,0.032263149151273665,0.12888135128727365,0.05942723717404923,0.08991356389101643,0.031174676784368062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03960337495778998,0.0,0.13805655797883398,0.042414372895429424,0.0,0.08216965481023818,0.030741508461316656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802239120693333,0.0705870060407835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04112204187609563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040633630300758665,0.0,0.1289760986212432,0.0,0.0,0.07768296117895998,0.04155886650228833,0.0,0.04339634435884997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03214389604577303,0.0,0.08181513322316931,0.0,0.036797181575757884,0.08433451063702595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04543418301977063,0.0,0.04120347114706843,0.06849608700423955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065835999527244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0537069879622324,0.025899737340489042,0.0,0.0962677627664362,0.1178471973756536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054885548194238236,0.0,0.0,0.12623707421017974,0.0,0.06982043373630689,0.04451732073009567,0.16675516855137382,0.04768195623901469,0.1604190188401581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589236718006812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614040124485922,0.0,0.2946910011210747,0.1561763362519518
mentalhealth,Fox42424242,2020/03/26,"I [20M] would like some help on how not to feel awful all the time and I suppose just to vent. I hope who ever reads this that you and your loved ones are in good health, given our time of uncertainty.

I feel like ever since I graduated high school, I can't seem to get rid of negative thoughts. In high school, I had a girlfriend that consistently lied to me and even though it has been two years, I can't exactly shake the feeling of being lied to in such a manor. Whenever I think of her, I constantly have this pit in my stomach form.

I like to think most people would consider me to be attractive and since high school I've taken some girls on dates but I've rejected almost all sexual advances towards me. All the girls but one have been the ones to ask me out. Some people think I'm really weird for turning down certain girls and I have no idea why I do it.

As of last fall, I enrolled myself in therapy at my university. I don't think it has helped much. I think it's my fault. I didn't necessarily lie to my therapist, but I sort of specifically do not talk about things to them. I don't know what to do about it because I feel an increased pressure to tell them the truth.

My father has been with me my entire life, however he has always been emotionally distant. He was severely physically abusive to my mother and is still psychologically abusive. My mother & father now live in separate houses. We've never said ""I love you to each other"". My father is very successful in his field and has made a substantial living to say the least. Often I think words can not describe how I wish I could give up all the money or vacations just to have a loving father.

I find it hard to be mad at him because he comes from immense poverty and abuse. He's provided so much and is so intelligent and yet I'm so mad at how his lack of fatherhood has impacted me. 

I feel lonely. I don't think I have a single close friend. The closest thing I have to a friend is my younger brother. He's in high school and I try to be the person for him that I wish I had in high school. I make sure he studies for the SAT, I make sure he takes AP classes, I check his grades, and I help him on any of his homework. During certain periods, i've thought that I can't commit suicide because I need to be there for him and I can't imagine what it would do to him. My dad no longer lives with him and I feel as if I'm the closest father figure in his life.

Lots of people tell me I have a lot of potential. Some people tell me I'm very eloquent and I'm an excellent speaker. I love reading the Wall Street Journal and discussing anything covered in it. I also really like reading books regarding medicine. My friends, which I just consider acquaintances, think I'll be some kind of CEO or something.

I'm an engineering student and I struggle a lot in school. Mostly I think it stems from social anxiety. I don't think you could ever notice by the way I talk how anxious I am about things. I cover up how I feel very well I think.

I used to workout a lot but lately I have been very sedentary. I haven't seriously been to a gym in over a year. I can't get myself to go. I know this is one aspect of me I need to change.

I constantly have these reoccurring thoughts about my past relationship where I was lied to, the lack of my dad being there ever, and just this general sense of emptiness and I don't know what to do.

If you ended up reading all this, thank you. I would appreciate any criticism or any form of comment.",3.02004988028731,4.427273255586595,4.525478850758184,85.3899022346369,74.12569832402234,7.684118116520352,26.053870710295293,8.306716005460428,1.5870591380686356,2745,95,578,46,56,918,297,716,0.142,0.73,0.128,-0.9382,1,3,1,0,1,2,67.0,1,6,2,3,32,34,2,3,28,1,63,8,1,9,17,125,120,40,1,15,16,10,8,4,4,4,3,3,1,4,28,25,0,0,29,7,2,6,19,10,1,5,19,11,108,24,83,88,26,64,0,2,0,4,67,37,0,21,24,403,136,19,0.0,0.1880855151843815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05298634816767747,0.0,0.0,0.04231580228779591,0.0440292025247005,0.05733296837977036,0.0,0.10795126782655272,0.0,0.04047953926669302,0.05977845875743565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043544223427444274,0.0,0.049468026507409835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676878317155048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055976651455727534,0.04558125952456102,0.0,0.11436381134972726,0.0,0.08449603631967792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05952182509332981,0.04686664719757086,0.0,0.0,0.03494960728798086,0.1914572118925041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872865515254604,0.037802214914421116,0.0,0.0,0.048363003812331766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264511185001065,0.0,0.055291409686532254,0.05076052488609509,0.030072597815594782,0.04438227251998927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047401105795658594,0.0,0.0,0.05624576638344248,0.0,0.0,0.10640266265632377,0.2795360048426496,0.0,0.05255615686470995,0.0,0.06105636672602864,0.0,0.059734164895740724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055102433737156106,0.0872414735151814,0.04313247750754648,0.05968999586425831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475032158582348,0.10340564153527336,0.0,0.14017373601107552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17994446982974022,0.1910300409567309,0.050069092619073184,0.07064183912914937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779666788477041,0.07847104011559272,0.04081101682559158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06024364528865118,0.0,0.0,0.1434252631052219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05051299195495227,0.1467373390203568,0.04620300494411275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117157567465789,0.0,0.06779692072222772,0.0,0.0,0.05681049885611807,0.0,0.0,0.050333920697834884,0.042079829453818066,0.0,0.3213145209158706,0.0,0.048171482476303235,0.0,0.05977845875743565,0.0,0.0875430405054762,0.0,0.0,0.05393979112877188,0.0,0.04073625944954548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04225768367620932,0.0,0.0,0.0553178495469446,0.0,0.0578800056042124,0.0,0.09974280577051267,0.0,0.039785208738089765,0.08506153395216016,0.13874912987462226,0.04871667255235135,0.06051247922644565,0.06143795191100175,0.1054623663561557,0.3729610690309455,0.051988345231421776,0.12602489235728334,0.06170988059588445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03592555339595447,0.057555911460527125,0.05168989469008936,0.0,0.0,0.04570124199990616,0.0,0.17464041180800788,0.0,0.042001162176047865,0.0,0.0,0.0475765979357706,0.0,0.04774721397189169,0.0,0.12169840256759595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503561106720622,0.0,0.0,0.06815056047599108
mentalhealth,wouldwalk500more,2020/03/26,"How have you improved yourself as a person? I turned 19 today (birthday just passed). I've been dealing with depression for years now, and I've spent my birthday feeling hopeless about my future as I imagined everything would eventually lead to suicide. Tonight I've decided to screw depression. In the next year in preparation for my 20s, I want to get rid of my insecurities and stop projecting them onto other people. Other than therapy, how have you improved yourself as a person and how can I get closer to accomplishing my goal?",7.715937499999999,8.748072052083337,7.858333333333332,67.22,62.85416666666666,10.566666666666666,38.91666666666667,10.504223727775694,4.539991666666666,431,22,66,10,6,140,63,96,0.203,0.713,0.084,-0.9282,0,0,0,0,0,2,11.0,0,2,1,3,6,5,1,1,3,0,5,1,0,4,0,15,11,9,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,4,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,2,1,12,0,16,8,0,14,0,3,0,1,6,4,1,0,8,46,14,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387718808358169,0.3989575755037859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20814928244403424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171051205736819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420053656658303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24631175517914225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16056392660170365,0.4044525241715335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19362995745754213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533354096124554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648575021972893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195319726340521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519168796419343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13660508243658634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16452368346898705,0.0,0.0,0.29828867453058955
mentalhealth,livinglikelarry12,2020/03/26,"Pet loss I lost one of my pets today. He was the sweetest cat, he was my handsome boy. I can’t stop replying the image of him laying on the street lifeless. Does anybody have any tips on how to cope with this? Has anybody experienced it? How did it get better 😓",0.7761111111111099,3.0156047592592614,2.7792592592592613,91.1666666666667,84.74074074074073,5.0814814814814815,21.962962962962962,6.42735559955562,0.4238740740740741,203,7,43,2,6,68,43,54,0.12300000000000001,0.772,0.105,0.168,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,2,0,4,8,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,4,1,5,2,6,4,0,5,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891361263232308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760360478077809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720767846217981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221383454439955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4641328254493376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881121210482012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3554684687231525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4030197350278863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emco619,2020/03/26,"Mental Health Just Now Being Recognized??? Clinical Depression is something I have always struggled with, however, our society makes it such a taboo topic, that I cannot even speak about it. It makes me fight my own thoughts every day, and I have no one but myself to tell.

Now that the COVID-19 has been placing everyone around the world on lockdown, I have been seeing posts about reaching out to others for social support, and others claiming they are depressed because they cannot see their friends for however long. While it is important to reach out to those struggling with the lockdowns, part of me struggles to feel empathy for them. I understand that no one truly knows what others are going through, and without a doubt, there are others like me who are struggling and feel like they cannot tell others, but these posts are troubling to me.

It makes me realize that mental health is not spoken about in our society, and as someone who has struggled with it for years, it is truly upsetting that a pandemic is the one thing that has sparked awareness for it. It feels like only when the masses feel this way, then we have to make others aware and have to tell others to support their peers. When the outspoken few who struggle with it daily for indefinite periods of time trying to bring awareness, we are told that we are crazy and that we should not speak of it.

It's just upsetting to me that it is only now that this is gaining traction because it feels like when everyone who feels isolated or sad during the lockdown goes back to their daily lives, we will still be here, with no one willing to listen. Is it wrong to feel this way?",11.567106406080349,8.266676153094464,9.838965798045603,70.08876357220414,57.8273615635179,12.839196525515744,42.1957111834962,10.504223727775694,4.3359535287730715,1317,51,233,20,12,402,147,307,0.179,0.713,0.10800000000000001,-0.9802,2,3,1,0,1,0,30.0,7,0,7,1,18,22,1,9,10,0,33,3,0,4,0,47,55,16,0,1,8,0,7,4,1,3,3,3,0,0,43,20,0,1,11,0,0,2,9,15,0,4,4,12,27,7,39,46,3,29,0,3,2,0,28,8,0,3,19,190,70,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225911359472381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730737735113245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667757797707466,0.0,0.10587558702951742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05600560565595143,0.0,0.14959297316155473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05735801464258691,0.0,0.07316773842337898,0.16596161582239866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30736782465796875,0.18611882920892614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670935542839308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049354045429881165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18461698097045487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04772583636483858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16970554926223788,0.0,0.07668266614442866,0.07685202545941609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318695949720989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750316832468343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353842855377467,0.13209380072662816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404091942654504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073092047552682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663403700366628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384029194775549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852400840698887,0.07358055053379349,0.06685485610005086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935176178346843,0.0,0.0,0.5447137642776148,0.0,0.0,0.19709348890133016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22770998705131815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05769365688770346,0.0,0.0,0.06894247825254188,0.0506379972405052,0.0,0.0,0.08298080791119931,0.0,0.058959701628373926,0.0,0.0,0.09040510024643653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786153619688366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837121404964849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494758557409283,0.0,0.05592310113061981
mentalhealth,BlueGlowStar,2020/03/26,"I am having panic attacks? For the past two days i've been having just fear for no reason, Just crying thinking something is wrong with me but when i take a shower and calm down i feel fine and back to normal i don't know what's wrong with me i think it might happen tomorrow too i just feel  worried everyday.",2.0073958333333337,4.026065781250002,3.3200000000000003,90.25833333333335,78.6875,5.5166666666666675,20.041666666666664,6.42735559955562,0.17440416666666625,246,6,50,2,6,80,49,64,0.27699999999999997,0.647,0.076,-0.8934,1,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,6,7,1,2,2,0,7,0,0,1,0,16,14,4,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,1,2,8,2,6,12,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,6,36,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24321768280101125,0.0,0.16439178265853518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348389463589573,0.13787725705729872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405738736878332,0.2161979123092403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18905433045530087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749372820236913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267980522639787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094694058514818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508372171897317,0.0,0.0,0.20408732825027914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21981235395654208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16458645651760584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607439322239623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739767809285931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20884236107507748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171147421976589,0.0,0.0,0.4674929414597961,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,audramurphy,2020/03/26,"Idk what's wrong with me I'm a 15 year old female in the united states. I first began thinking there was something wrong with my mental health 5th grade (4.5 years ago). Some symptoms I can trace back to 2nd grade, some are more recent developments. My circumstances dont allow for me to consult a diagnosis right now, so I thought I'd post here to find advice from those who've experienced mental health issues. Obviously this wont be an actual diagnosis but I want to narrow down the things I could potentially have.

Symptoms:
-Horrible chronic insomnia
-Feeling of constant apathy
-Random mood swings where I get kinda pissed off
-Im losing the joy in things I used to love
-Serious self confidence issues
-I think people are laughing at me when I'm just walking by and they're laughing about probably other stuff
-Sometimes my mind wanders into thinking what it would be like if I was dead
-I feel like my life is worthless, no hope for the future sort of things
-My symptoms fluctuate, some years were way better or worse than others
-I daydresm a lot; like I create my own ""mind movies"" when I'm bored or dont wanna face problems
-Is picking at lips/acne a symptom or am I just weird?
-I don't voice my thoughts sometimes out of fear or being made fun of/ thinking I'm unimportant
-Im lazy and have zero motivation to do anything so I just kinda lay down for hours",3.2865465083404004,5.948733385496187,4.047879558948264,83.32467203845067,77.74045801526717,6.476901328809726,25.35255866553577,7.662118739084242,1.5863905569691832,1105,41,196,17,27,352,176,262,0.179,0.632,0.18899999999999997,0.7464,0,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,4,13,21,1,1,9,0,21,12,2,5,1,46,40,12,1,7,9,0,2,3,0,2,9,1,0,1,11,6,0,0,10,0,0,1,5,10,0,2,7,4,25,10,29,27,6,31,0,2,0,1,3,12,1,14,18,124,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.09664291890672866,0.0,0.0,0.09677489938484614,0.08778768446361279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149656123993332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761510493328187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875875438776643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702059448625996,0.0,0.07907060749323401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321342706666828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144080699850184,0.10014915356268617,0.07074992456603467,0.0,0.0,0.09051530126622258,0.08423828788024577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051741188622515664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21053706708964687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836312877636193,0.09752856204282333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21394747453797455,0.20673157666855005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995065798996754,0.1451490611373951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079373785264206,0.0,0.08419518337318686,0.08938207072080362,0.09370838544536847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19960600073104845,0.0,0.19999226006483595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391954598211132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865772078576284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484721682164793,0.0,0.1067754249605468,0.09476218349565256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778414842702364,0.0,0.0,0.08457451303133627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331408267700316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624122791964437,0.19589435861120744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337026064461117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4117370700960746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19738140955881048,0.25382800798354765,0.0,0.1572439013235172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855335972081881,0.0,0.0,0.05841283161387102,0.07860859641077672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009241283627505,0.07035092726823662,0.21655631122265892,0.0,0.19132398817337348
mentalhealth,jackiechanchoo,2020/03/26,"Can you develop a personality disorder from being bullied in school? My friend used to get severely bullied all through middle to high school! And he just recently got diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder!
I'm wondering if the bullying has something to do with him developing BPD, does it?
Does bullying cause personality disorders?",8.305090909090909,11.76394932727273,9.510909090909092,46.46636363636367,64.81818181818181,15.30909090909091,45.54545454545455,13.023866798666859,8.641109090909092,283,19,35,15,5,97,45,55,0.34600000000000003,0.61,0.043,-0.973,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,2,1,9,9,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,8,7,1,4,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,2,1,22,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20731550835406848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909571595143796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707163607947256,0.0,0.0,0.5659582476768259,0.0,0.2880956587034897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271741956568239,0.0,0.08599984680452695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165046391887922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17391528795600947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43118285856296495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625285774933999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3331801417434967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18595793901787303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672174907140066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216674282861974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17850819714026742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LostAurhor,2020/03/26,"Are my intrusive thoughts making me racist? My mother kidnapped me away from my father when I was four. Because of that, I didn't have the best childhood.

At one point, we ended up moving to the projects. Some black kids were mean to me. Just little simple things that one shouldn't really take a second thought about. I don't remember what exactly what they were to be quite honest.

When my mom and I moved in with her boyfriend when i was 9, I had to move schools. I was one in seven people who were white.

Now, there was this one kid who, for some reason, couldn't stand me. He would push me around, he would stomp on my binder, and he would just be intimidating.

There were some other kids who would make fun of me by calling me Harry Potter (which in all honesty, I did and still do look like him 😂) and other names.

I wasn't welcomed by anyone in that school.

Nowadays, I know that I have intrusive thoughts. I, unfortunately, self diagnosed myself. However, whenever I am able to, I will see a professional.

My intrusive thoughts are violent. 90% of the time just being extremely heated arguments. Sometimes they'll be me causing harm to another person.

Unfortunately, some of the people in my head are actually black. 

I don't want to defend myself by saying I'm not racist, but that's all I want to say.

Does this make me racist? Or does it mean something different because I was tormented by black kids in the past?

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

Thank you.",3.5844680851063835,5.762831319148938,4.375157446808512,83.78580000000002,74.46099290780144,7.490723404255319,25.109787234042553,8.364918446050245,1.6598457872340426,1160,39,223,21,25,372,157,282,0.10400000000000001,0.8370000000000001,0.06,-0.8111,2,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,1,1,2,2,13,9,1,0,7,0,36,2,1,5,3,43,53,9,0,9,6,3,0,1,0,8,1,2,0,6,17,7,0,0,9,0,0,4,7,2,0,7,17,8,41,7,31,22,7,27,0,0,6,0,26,13,0,5,10,162,58,4,0.10277900092656944,0.0,0.10029747885520668,0.0,0.0,0.10043445018598844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06989324507218547,0.10777274393768416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186546717865888,0.0,0.0,0.0914951012382299,0.0,0.0,0.09656425464833256,0.0,0.0,0.12530625000927953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786022051198248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494885132722637,0.0,0.0,0.10558234573038797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043185224594948,0.0,0.10738218057302272,0.0,0.0,0.17988519265261158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09103168839724626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331421136329035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548090669314543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056484651006158265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05021262828485545,0.10301155994078057,0.0,0.0,0.0863084752254804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058173436315206,0.0,0.0,0.22391292541124724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203735236940857,0.0,0.3277134373442864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785828438771771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811418607077478,0.1425080363187848,0.08974265923820764,0.0,0.0,0.09715937698456956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931811880269797,0.0,0.0,0.0658428598002902,0.10567393077094522,0.0,0.0,0.11642857248098312,0.0,0.0,0.16346797356768356,0.0,0.2080356720933378,0.08190155689636758,0.0,0.1072209132336166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912429624094397,0.1016510599686259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207944290500621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727701769229406,0.0,0.0,0.09462509525891977,0.0,0.0,0.06828180127969123,0.0,0.0,0.32638018483954584,0.05993126196711369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12124343531716472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650562669231878,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yestermorrowWW3,2020/03/26,"I am very paranoid I feel like everyone that I care deeply about can see my most private thoughts, searches, and moments.

I cannot shake this feeling and it’s sometimes hard to notice when it’s happening because I don’t really know what it’s like to live without this feeling.",4.857777777777779,6.398038666666665,4.971296296296298,83.46583333333334,69.74074074074073,7.622222222222224,35.72222222222222,8.07648339933343,2.8566444444444437,224,12,41,3,4,70,40,54,0.069,0.677,0.254,0.8317,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,9,12,3,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,5,6,3,4,11,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,25,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16110916231974556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694619904914045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525410970795724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4008999684902296,0.18880933434586852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337113999326756,0.0,0.2367525620601177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14524726111987898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582381798273188,0.0,0.2333735368764345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008967223552708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16931139486459196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21060547615589167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613902677519557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20981730030772186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21806751256511175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25476681092916165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,texasangel1025,2020/03/26,"I think the Bodyshop Industry gave me PTSD... I'm a 29 F, and I worked in the bodyshop industry for 5 years as an estimator. 

When I first started, I would joke about how I never met a sober estimator, most everyone drank or was on some kind of drug. This should have been a huge red flag, but the money was too enticing to walk away. 

For anyone who isn't familiar with the Bodyshop Industry, it's very tough, especially as a female, because everyone automatically assumes you have no working knowledge of vehicles. 

In the bodyshop industry, ordering something as small as the wrong emblem for a car can spiral out of control and cost hundreds of thousands of dollars. 

How does it happen? Well, you put the wrong emblem on the estimate by mistake. The insurance approves the wrong emblem.  The parts department orders it. The manufactuerer dealership sells it to you. The body technician never looks at it when it arrives. 15 days later  when the car is supposed to go home, the car is inspected and its FINALLY noticed that the wrong emblem is on the car. The insurance inspector fails the inspection, which hurts your DRP (direct repair partner) score, meaning they will be less likely to recommend your shop to customers looking for a repair facility. They are also not paying for the customers rental car, because you should have ordered the correct part, that's your problem. You call the manufacturer, the correct emblem wont be here for 3 more days - its special order. Now you have to call the owner, who expected to pick their car up today and tell them it wont be ready -they scream at you about how they have plans, they already took off work, you've had their car too long, they basically come unhinged on you. Now you're going to get a bad survey and your scores will be even worse. Also, your bad scores mean you lose your 1200$ bonus check. All over a stupid emblem. 

For six years I endured this. Sometimes the mistakes weren't my fault, sometimes we would be shipped a broken part, or wrong item, but it was still the same scenario over and over.

It finally got to where I would run to the bathroom to cry it out if I had a difficult customer. 

I finally left, I took a 20k annual pay cut to work in a small office answering phones and invoicing orders for large corporations. It's been 7 days, and today I made my first mistake.... I added a 24$ charge to the wrong customers invoice. It's really not a big deal and was easily fixed, but it automatically sent me into tears. I sat at my desk willing myself ""dont cry, you're new, they know you will make mistakes. It's a 24$ charge on a 10k$ invoice. It's okay. Dont cry"" but I couldnt stop. I just sat there and tears kept streaming down my face. After about 10 minutes I had to go to the bathroom and cry it out. 

This cannot be a normal reaction to making a small mistake. I was never like this before. I've made mistakes my whole life. I think the fear of horrible emotional stress at the smallest mistake is now engrained in me, like workplace PTSD or something???

TL;DR left a high stress, emotional rollercoaster job for a much more laid back job, but I cant stop crying when I make an error, because I fear horrible consequences will always follow.",5.204479863868407,6.452997469918702,5.7020533182076,79.65570051049349,68.60975609756098,8.777840801663832,30.725089809037627,9.10164783776728,2.6101862355832863,2544,101,473,47,43,819,295,615,0.228,0.7120000000000001,0.06,-0.9990000000000001,3,0,3,0,0,0,88.0,1,16,10,12,25,38,2,4,53,1,46,5,2,10,6,76,77,33,0,17,12,0,0,3,1,12,2,1,1,1,27,18,1,4,8,2,9,19,15,29,1,4,23,4,57,9,65,35,13,89,0,3,3,0,39,33,0,7,35,313,84,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060714923155609,0.10233482441777726,0.05323922111857789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04473860257803988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011440517343913,0.04919919893453858,0.10684674560840114,0.11701085527850905,0.0,0.054445065402327485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107100884574333,0.0,0.0,0.13066818139171232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055115937049507034,0.0,0.0,0.0717626979777268,0.0,0.0,0.35141318661562365,0.12379178245059975,0.0659639603175642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599220640806745,0.0,0.1499758737681917,0.0,0.07420030060259553,0.0,0.0,0.1439451739216646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042260358210404164,0.0,0.0,0.12227754704439545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399797457766345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102716932143718,0.0,0.10884830398624626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03342862710956169,0.0,0.10908953100953793,0.0,0.05117328030999887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05658021017283142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760185658176608,0.06418045463181174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849543301978779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698708089454044,0.0,0.0,0.06662874832353542,0.03516354171665671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390360590095219,0.0,0.04519328844713764,0.09377700762663774,0.0,0.0,0.05662319634575736,0.10745969444907537,0.07158093285740269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210850681048771,0.128128024514295,0.0,0.0,0.1393931157110029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047035078610409516,0.0,0.14804356819541006,0.06179545814900025,0.0,0.0,0.06269003719360533,0.0,0.07284539734082976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20786299697605645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061223365378690685,0.14958607913881666,0.06432087663187176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04098933260788069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851492191626346,0.12656221554274802,0.0,0.045287700488523486,0.0,0.05109713635931749,0.10698578731558077,0.14658528020143374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055924213793191985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199581469561062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129735109995375,0.0,0.14217557419192398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05279291338101108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05752865989683052,0.0,0.0,0.07143505595393879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863223824840056,0.0,0.06520443660484065,0.13635567583994765,0.4197340862556601,0.0,0.08240627925297597
mentalhealth,ColorsArePeopleToo,2020/03/26,"Coping with mental illness during the pandemic I know I'm not the only one, but all this corona virus stuff is really messing with my head. I'm struggling to stay motivated with my schoolwork at home along with every other college student right now, but my issues go beyond that. Being socially isolated and doing online coursework brings me back to a really low point in my life that happened during high school. I was being bullied really bad by  a former friend, lost a lot of our close mutual friends, and had to do home-bound schooling for health reasons all in the same year. Right now, I'm continuing this semester online and I'm away from all my friends. This similar situation is causing me to replay bad memories from this time in high school and also just making me feel generally sad and helpless.

Normally when I get reminded of this time and feel down I try to keep myself busy and go out and do something with a friend. Of course, I can't do that now with everything going on. I also see a therapist while away at college but I can't meet with her until I go back in August. 

Basically, this pandemic is indirectly triggering me and also taking away my most helpful mental health tools at the same time. I can feel myself starting to slip into a negative mindset and I don't know how to keep myself afloat until my life situation goes back to normal. I'm feeling kind of lost right now and want to know if anyone else is dealing with a similar situation. Any advice is greatly appreciated.",6.3590248640248666,7.110557590909092,7.316456876456879,70.90707847707847,65.74825174825175,10.131779331779333,31.97280497280497,10.125756701596842,3.3620068376068364,1205,46,204,27,18,405,151,286,0.147,0.75,0.10400000000000001,-0.9392,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,1,0,0,3,14,15,0,1,11,0,17,6,1,6,3,56,45,23,0,4,6,0,4,0,4,0,5,0,1,0,11,23,0,2,9,0,0,5,5,9,0,1,4,5,26,6,43,39,7,48,0,5,1,0,10,23,0,4,19,147,37,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08412921160573443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20654593824297285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585462816155255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060198319244264935,0.08821258714127822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426619929062833,0.19860091151867265,0.14376833722344434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844136139872873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875823814313534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191976406059432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253717637608054,0.0,0.07737495519078308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17412509619265487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660613590449073,0.0,0.04498010779681018,0.0,0.19571484238066755,0.0,0.0,0.09491798131085023,0.0,0.0,0.07613187177561903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835639069183028,0.1830259455770528,0.0,0.0,0.05770641121628984,0.18192424034324686,0.1727168608106819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898588614903741,0.0,0.1530470618686437,0.0,0.08965274799161367,0.14194360047294108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162024957723375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18796164596456524,0.07319330160208476,0.0,0.0,0.05746783373779714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17352325427378645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16870597895106798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05833893394863227,0.0654777059395392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138583693821545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16546039355840786,0.08851807787641833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22056919144819254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26139253582815863,0.06860507921548686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.290316860584303,0.0,0.08776110550498613,0.0,0.06627869868637824,0.0,0.0,0.060937161528263215,0.0917638230234374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000323376871203,0.09855603785893746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473132039510161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09996076119018618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506047917968315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058451584923279586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050779959499529084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05544115395143882
mentalhealth,iwba12,2020/03/26,"How religion took 16 years from my life 


My story 

Hello, to someone who might read this. 

It feels weird to do this but I want to tell my story to people who might understand. 
I'm not professionally diagnosed but I definitely have deep emotional and mental problems. Please don't tell me to seek out professional help. I want to have therapy so so bad. I know that I need help, but for now it's not possible, because if I would ask my parents they would tell me I should pray to god and he would fix the ""phase"" I have. 

But I assure you, as soon I get the opportunity to seek out professional help, without my parents knowing I'm going to. 
As long as that is impossible I'm trying to figure out what is going on with me on my own. 

I did so much research during quarantine because I started to question my sense of self, especially my identity and endet up having an internal crisis.

 I thought my issues weren't that deep, because I never was physically abused and technically everything in my life was fine. I had clothes, food and an overall loving family (on the surface). And I played it down because I thought: someone like me can't call their experiences trauma, because I was never hit nor bullied. 

Generally people liked me (because I was a massive people pleaser and still do it but it's gotten better) or at least they were nice to me. My parents supported me, helped me out when I needed money for something. 

And now there are two parts of me fighting. 
The one part that knows exactly how f*cked up I really am and the other part that tells me I'm exaggerating, that I should stop overthinking and stop being ungrateful. 

Im torn and I hope to find at least one person who kind of understands me. 
I feel like no one could ever get me. 
Because my ""trauma"" doesn't feel validated. 
Even though I found out that the part of the brain that is responsible for physical pain is also responsible for emotional pain. 

It still feels like I don't deserve to be heard. 
Because on the surface everything was perfectly fine. 

And even though I talked to friends about it and they really helped me, they still told me to be grateful that I was well liked and no one directly hurt me. But I can't. I can't look at the positive aspects and live normally. 

It affects my life. It affects the person I am. It shaped me. I can't concentrate (and it got worse and worse with time), I have emotional outbursts that I learned to hide, I'm constantly on guard and don't feel safe in my house (because I constantly think my parents could find out something that I'm hiding fro them), I can never relax no matter where I am (except when I'm at my boyfriends house and I know no one is going to be at home for a longer period of time), I feel like I'm not worth it, I feel ugly on the inside and outside, and I hate myself for coping by overeating (I'm not obese nor anything near it, but if I continue to eat how I eat without going to the gym it could happen), I feel like I have to be the main mother-figure to my sisters because my mum so is emotionally detached that I don't want them to think that what she does is real love. 

But the worst thing is how distant I feel from my emotions and myself. Does a ""myself"" even exist? Can I ever be ""it""? I feel numbed out and drained, even though I do nothing all day but distracting myself as good as I can. 

I feel like I never achieved anything and that I never will. 

Everything is overwhelming and so hard to do, even the littlest homework or task. 
That's why I have a pile of work in my e-mails and in the back of my mind that stresses me the hell out. But I just can't get myself to do it unless it has a deadline (and even then I tend to it last minute). 

I feel weak, stupid and misunderstood and I think to myself: if that continues all my good marks are going to drop. And then my parents are going to be a problem even on the surface. 

Im doing my A-Levels (class of 2021) in Germany (I was born here) right now and I just feel like I can't do it. And it is required from me that I get prestigious degree. Even though I would rather pursue a singing career. 

That was the longest introduction I ever wrote, but it needed to be at least written down somewhere. 

So, what is the big deal? What am I complaining about?

 (I'll try to create a chronological order and to remember everything crucial but I yesterday realized that I'm missing blocks of time in my memories even from recent times.) 

It all started even before I was born. 
My parents found each other through friends and got together. 

My mum lived in Kazakhstan before moving to germany (I still don't exactly know why) and my father lived in Siberia before moving to Germany (his and my uncle's parents wanted to prevent them from having to fight in a war zone) and so they happened to live in the same city and then met.
They got together and married. 

Then their neighbors invited them to go with them to a Russian-German evangelical church and they ended up being members. 

Then I was born and everything was perfect. I was in church every Sunday from the moment my mother could leave the hospital. 
I never knew anything different. 

And as soon as I was able to be separated from my mother for 2-3 hours I was with other children in my age while the adults were attending the ""big"" service. 

And then the indoctrination started. 

I don't remember much from my time in church (or the cult as I call it now) from the time before I was 12. I only remember my time in school. Which is very odd to me, but what do I know? 

I just remember being a people pleaser from the start and everything they taught us but there aren't much of clear memories. I was good at being a people pleaser. 
Now it's easy for me to approach people and connect on a surface level. 
But at what price? 

It's scary to me that my memories are so blurry. 
I don't even know who I was friends with, or if I even had friends (before the age of 10).

I just remember that I wanted to be perfect in god's eyes. I wanted to be the perfect example of a girl who loves Jesus with all her heart. 
I wanted people on church to look at me and think that I will make it far in my faith. 
And I achieved that, I think. 

But now I hate my past self for caring so much.
 
So what where we taught there? 
God created the world, Jesus died for my sins and resurrected after three days, the Bible is the only truth and the only way I must live (everything else is the devil's work) and even though they didn't say it in particular but that our church is the only one to teach the ""real"" truth and that every other church doesn't have god in it and immediately leads to hell and damnation. 

We were taught that the secular world was highly dangerous and as soon as were not following one of god's (the church's) rules, were open for demons to attack us. And to make it short: you could sin by thinking something.

 So we were taught to somehow control our thoughts but give full control to god, over every little aspect in our live, because everything is predestined and we don't have control about anything anyways. 

But we're still responsible for our actions somehow and still have a ""free will"" granted from god. 

While writing this I really understand how contradicting this is. 
And it was a core beliefe of mine. 

When an adult who looked after you as a toddler tells you this and there are 500 people who all believe it wholeheartedly, you try to justify it until you really can't anymore. 
And then everything shatters. 

Losing faith in something that was so deeply intertwined with your whole existence is like a part of you just died. Even though you know how ridiculous it was believing in it and you still feel stupid for not realizing it earlier. 

So in a nutshell everything bad you do is because you're not saved (because for someone who is ""really"" saved it's physically impossible to sin no matter how) and automatically fully your fault. But when you achieve something it's because god did it. 

You're never capable of doing or achieving something on your own. You're even unable to think in the ""right, good way"". So you're basically nothing and unimportant. 

But when you come to god, he gives you a purpose he specifically chose for you, you matter to him, you're worthy of his love (and even though we were taught he is forgiving to everyone and (almost) everything) if you only follow him everywhere he leads you. 

Another bizarre contradiction they teach little children: you're nothing but with god you're worthy. 
It makes me unbelievably mad that there are gradually more and more children who grow up believing this. 

Who are taught that demons, the devil and hell are around every corner to take them and torture them for eternity if they slip up one tiny bit. 

That's why I cried myself to sleep for years begging god to forgive me for saying ""sh*t"" one time or thinking in my head that I wanted to kiss a boy, not speaking of being attracted to a girl. 

Because of course anything then straight marriage within my church is wrong (yes I was expected to have a boyfriend within church and if he was in the ""world"" I had to convince him to go to church and he has to love god). 

We weren't allowed to date before 17 and of course no premarital s*x. But they took it further to prevent it all costs. You weren't allowed to be alone in a room with your s.o. Before marriage so nothing could possibly happen. Holding hands and short hugs were allowed when engaged. 

So if you grew up there, find a boyfriend and get engaged as fast as possible (because if you ""fall in love"" it must be gods plan) because you wanna f*ck, and then marry as fast possible (you had to be together at least a year and then be engaged for at least half a year) to have your first kiss ever (if you weren't sinful) I front of everybody when the pastor says: you may kiss the bride. 

We were taught that god wants us to be pure and learn to value our partner's personality. 
They told us girls that if we had a sexual relationship before marriage you would never know if he really loves you or just wants your body. And that every guy outside church would never love us for our personalities.

Another contradiction. These young adults rush into marriage not because they think ""wow I really value my partner as a person"". 
No, they're s*x-driven teenagers lying to themselves (which is absolutely not their fault of course). 

No one is appreciating anything. 
And if they are, they're VERY lucky. 

Because there were maybe 15 people in your age range that you could end up with. 

Girls were also taught to save themselves because we are like chewing gum. 
And if you're all chewed up, your godly future husband wouldn't want you, wouldn't he? 

We were told we were pure glasses of water. 
And if we sleep around before marriage, or even with only one person, every time dirt would fall into our pure water. And no one wants to drink dirty water. 

But the one thing that stuck with me that my mother (and later on more older women) told me was: every time you sleep with a man, he takes a part of your soul with him. That's why there should be only one guy from the start. 

So that you don't end up losing your soul. The thought of that terrified me to the core and I believed it. 
Now I know it's bullsh*t but it was in my head constantly for 5-6 years. 

We were told to cover up so guys don't sin with their eyes and thoughts. Knee-length skirts and shorts were allowed (and I always hated how they looked on me) and you had to cover your belly and your shoulders at all cost. Cleavage was obviously not allowed and so weren't tight clothes (only skinny jeans, not leggings). Especially when you had a little bit more chest. 

And if you dared to show a little tiny bit of skin (no matter how hot summer was) even if it was accidental, you'd get in trouble for it.

I was in that godforsaken building almost everyday. Except for Wednesdays where we would meet up with our local little group of girls (there was a leader a few years older then us and I'm glad mine wasn't as controlling as others and didn't force me too much to work in different groups in church) and discuss what our beloved (I could vomit remembering him and his sleazy and narcissistic behavior) pastor taught us last Sunday. 

I was involved in worship (and my love for singing kind of saved me because that's the only thing I really did because I myself wanted it) I danced (which was ok it was workout for me and not dancing for god when I think about it) I looked after toddlers once month during service (with other women) I was in the theater group and when there was an event for teenagers I was responsible for leading a group of other teenagers to organize it so everything was done and standing where it belongs (I liked organizing, so I was lucky they just positioned me there but it still was hella stressful). And I played the piano(which I didn't really enjoy). 

So there are the Basics. I was heavily involved. 

With 12 you move from being with children to the ""big"" service and you're finally old enough to be part of all the cool things the teenagers did. 

But then you're also constantly stressed out which worsened every year because obviously school got harder, but also church demanded more and more and suddenly you were thrown into highly responsible tasks which drained you. 

When I was 14 I started to constantly have headaches. I started drinking coffee because I was exhausted of not being able to sleep, being stressed out and constantly worried that someone would find out my secrets. (And now I need a very strong one for it to ""work"".)

Because in school I was someone else. I had a different name in school (my real name). In church the pastor required my parents to introduce me with a very far away nickname from my real name because it sounded like a name in the Bible that an evil person had and if I'd be called that it would curse me. 

I did and said what I wanted (it increased gradually because I still tried to be ""myself"", which you could be in church (no),  in school but obviously couldn't do that, because no one can ). 

I thought I was being myself I school and maybe that was ""myself"" when I was 14 but I still was the most severe case of a people pleaser. 

And I always endet up in dependent toxic friendships because I could never say anything against them. I had no one else who was close to me. So that also hurt me even though I didn't notice at the time. 

People abused my kindness, because in church they told us we had to be nice. And I could do at least that. So I held on to being nice to everyone, helping everyone and inviting people to come to church who were remotely close to me. Which still embarrasses me the most, but you get in trouble when you're not inviting people. 

I'm so glad I was in a very accepting class. No one was ever really bullied, just mocked for a few things, maybe. 
Which I was for being in that ""church"". 
And they told me early on: it's a cult, you believe in crazy sh*t, stop going there. 
But we were taught that people who are afraid of the truth always say that. 

School was kind of a safe place for me, even if I had toxic friendships and got hurt a few times, because we live about 25 kilometers away from church (the cult lol) and no one I knew from there could see me. 
And even though we were taught that god could see EVERYTHING and is always reading our thoughts I didn't feel very watched (I was scared sh*tless when I wore something in school we weren't allowed to wear in church and I thought I saw someone I knew) so I felt better in school then at home. 

And that's why my definition of ""home"" is something entirely different then that of people who grew up in an emotionally safe home. 

So what was living in my ""home"" like? 

I'm the first daughter of three and therefore my fathers precious first born. I learned really fast that just keeping quiet, smiling and doing what I'm told is the best way to avoid any more stressful situations. I hated every form of confrontation and I still do.

When I was as young as 3 my father threatened to hit me with a belt (and did it a few times) but I stopped misbehaving or questioning so no one yelled at me anymore and no one told me to stand in a corner without looking around. 

So I just learned to not show my emotions at all at ""home"". Because emotions cause trouble and distress. They also told us that. God and our own intellect (which is controlled by god) must lead us. Emotions come out because of the devil. 

My father was in control of everything and to this day he's still extremely, s*xist, r*cist, homophobic, transphobic etc. You name it. 
And he still thinks I have exactly the same opinions as him. 

He is very critical of my boyfriend, but because he puts on a facade in front of my father as I do my father likes him. 

My parents (more my father) still don't want me to have anything premarital, even though they are less strict then before. So yeah I can't ask for birth control because then they would not let me see my bf. 

As I said my father is very controlling and has a very high opinion of himself. Because he is providing for our family he doesn't have to do anything regarding the house. This is on the woman and the four girls in his house, because that's what god made us for. 

Popping out babies, cleaning und cooking. 

But I still have to have a degree and a high paying job. 

And then I ask myself: what do you want from me? What? 

In church we learned that you have to find a job that gives you enough time to be as active as possible in church while giving birth to as many children as possible and managing your whole household completely alone. 

Because your husband is by god's law above you and there to ""lead"" you. How remarkably generous of you to lead me, because I can't decide on anything ever due to always thinking I don't have control anyways. 

That's why I need to plan everything obsessively and always know and control what's going on.

I idolized my father until the realization that we don't have any emotional bond slowly reached me until it hit me hard. 

I had to organize my phone a certain way and delete massages so in case he would want to go through it he wouldn't find anything. 

He wanted me to be his perfect show-daughter who has good marks and serves god with all of her existence. And he really did that. 
In front of him I am what he wants me to be. 

I don't know what my mother wants. She just does what my father tells her and silently agrees to what he has to say. Maybe I learned to behave in that way because she did. I'm honestly sorry for her because she never had a chance to study anything that could make her independent, because of moving to Germany with 17 or 18 and not being able to speak the language very well. 

I could cry, because, no matter how brutal this sounds, her life is over in a way. She is what I never want to be. 

Whenever they told us how our future will look like I had a kind of panic that I never felt before. At the time I suppressed that but when I think back my heart rate goes up and I feel like I need to run as fast as I can. 

And that's why I hate to be dependent on someone. But weirdly I still end up in situations where I'm highly dependent. 

Another thing that I can maybe explain now is my reaction to my grandfathers death (he was more of a father to me then my own and his and his wife's home (which I also deeply loved) felt safe). 

When I was 11 years old my grandmother (my grandfathers wife) passed away because of cancer. And I was never allowed to see her while she was sick nor to attend the funeral. 

And in that time I already saw my grandpa rarely. When my parents told me my grandma passed away I cried one time.

I know that I was sad but I somehow can't really recall my immediate emotions from that day. 

And I thought I'm glad that I still have my grandpa. But he passed away three months later. And I wasn't able to see him during these months. When my father (emotionlessly) told us that his father also passed away I felt nothing. I didn't cry. No reaction at all. And then I didn't think about it for years. 

But when I was 14 all of the sudden all of the emotions I should have felt when I was 11 crushed me harder then anything ever. 

It was like reliving the day I was told he was gone for ever for almost a year. And I was so confused. Why now? Why didn't I feel anything back then? Because my brain was already way to stressed for an 11 year old and just didn't process properly. 

Then three years later something triggered my memories and the horrors began. 

When I was 16 it hit me again because I found out he committed s*icide (through my cousin). 

Back to the cult. 
So am I still there? No. 

My parents realized how manipulative literally everything about it was and without telling anyone there (childhood friends I grew up with included) we went there one last time and on Sunday the 23rd September 2018 we drove away and never came back. 

And many others left too. 
We still meet every Sunday and I still sing there, because I don't want to confront my parents.
 
I really don't want to be there because every time we're there I'm not really there. I'm just a shell that moves around. During the preaching (which a few men do in turns) I'm always completely zoned out and can only concentrate for a bit if I really really try. 

I don't know what that is or that means but I absolutely hate it because I can't control it. 

And sometimes I'm just sad for no reason, I still can't sleep and still get a massive headache and can't stand up properly without strong coffee. I still eat too much stuff really shouldn't and I feel bad for every little bit I eat. But I can't stop. 

And it also affects all of my relationships, especially with my bf. He sometimes doesn't understand but he still comforts me and is patient which I am really grateful for. 

And something that comes to my mind only now is that my father used to completely lose it when I had a bad mark. I was afraid to come home and always started crying before even telling him. And then he would shout even more, beat the table with his fist and tell me to stop crying. 

Now I can control if I'm going to cry or not when something upsets me. And if I want to show my emotions or not. Being a very good liar was essential and it still is.

When my father is mad at me because I didn't do the dishes he still gets very impulsive and shames me because if he works and gives me food and clothing it's disrespectful to leave the dishes for too long. And when he stands beside me and doesn't stop while I do the dishes I just nod my head and say yes. It's the only way to avoid more pain at all costs. 

There are these moments but also the ones where he tries to talk to me and asks me how I am and then he tells me how he loves his first born princess. He tells that I'm the best daughter someone could have and that he's so so proud of me. And I just smile at him and say thank you. 

But on the inside I think: ""if you knew who I really am and what I did that you don't of, you wouldn't talk to me anymore"". 

He is proud of the daughter he created for himself that I still am in front of him. 

And also my mother tries to get closer to me after 16 years of distance and letting the church raise us. And the only thing that I would tell her if I was honest for a few seconds in the midst of all the lies I protect myself with is: ""I'm sorry but it's too late."" 

I don't have any emotional connection to my parents and I never had. 

The first 16 years of my life partly wasted. 
I feel like someone took my childhood from me. Even my memories are blurry. 
And I know it's technically not my parents fault but I want to blame them so badly. 

And it makes me so mad that I was born because of the ""church"". Because they convinced my father to have children. 
I was cursed before I even existed. 

And still. 

I can recall a few beautiful memories of things I did with my friends there. The sleepovers, summer camp, singing together, playing hide and seek in the big building. 

All of us connected through our fear of the dangerous outside world and hell. 

There is no moment in my life where I wasn't afraid that some adult could dream, or feel( they taught us that god can reveal things about people to you when you have strong connection to the holy spirit) that I  was a dirty sinner that acted differently in school.

And it was so frightening, because when it's out that you messed up you can't attend certain rituals( like the holy communion) and that's when people know. They see that you're not taking part in it and the first thing that comes to mind is of course ""premarital s*x!!!"" 

When a couple did it (and someone found out) it's made sure by the authorities that in a week everyone knows. 

And I wanted to avoid people thinking that at all costs so was very aware and on guard all the time.

 I made sure I had a different app also open while watching vampire diaries on my phone because there you can switch faster so my father or my mother (who still just burst into my room whenever they want to) would never know I would watch something the devil created.

 My parents and everyone in church who was ""responsible"" for me always tried to shelter me and get anything with a ""bad influence"" away from me. 

But I still watched what I wasn't allowed to. The internet and myself raised me when my beliefs started to break away. People like Jenna Marbles taught me things parents should teach their kids. I educated myself on so much stuff I missed out on and started to build my own opinions and morals from 14-16. 

Basic knowledge like: it's okay to not believe what your parents believe was so new to me.
 
And now? I just want to move out and study something so I'm always safe. I can't wait for the day where I'm finally going to be financially independent and don't have to rely on my father.

Wow it feels good put all of that in words. 

When you read until now you must be really really bored, but thank you. I appreciate your attention greatly. 

I just wish I could get help.",4.277130460532927,5.5272231279593065,4.974965437556516,83.99792690646039,70.8019956955586,7.826324990613779,27.66598856731904,8.221444062811749,1.7614967828795334,20401,708,4037,294,370,6574,1052,5111,0.132,0.741,0.127,-0.9937,33,6,16,0,8,0,572.0,54,75,41,56,279,232,29,23,187,7,427,71,22,64,74,853,735,472,5,116,141,54,32,22,11,37,17,19,13,37,267,297,19,41,118,22,9,67,139,100,2,38,226,73,669,133,580,404,90,616,58,11,21,15,474,243,4,64,313,2908,936,67,0.041122388198435035,0.024361652816232524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030883598748048368,0.02129519615509411,0.02268978897496697,0.0986566769555366,0.08554280306733149,0.0,0.0,0.02097347559128513,0.03234030716485322,0.0,0.0,0.030586769383133712,0.0071884324928739715,0.0,0.12690083112284642,0.03660764394919275,0.03844388185117762,0.011695663299108186,0.08693063410201096,0.03952572273882394,0.05150321469358605,0.3446826097214256,0.0,0.11372440153705235,0.08107898663701907,0.021577704682260317,0.01818470529304257,0.05611874663440648,0.011419425727410778,0.0,0.02295309260988288,0.03149291708192492,0.011758264242448524,0.010481753857952542,0.010561005090739295,0.0,0.053134944311785136,0.032337031229912216,0.06665803896968753,0.13836676521656174,0.14774796367770726,0.011375285095311074,0.07904927183543545,0.03978080762654275,0.010598844138645036,0.0,0.010434589600485076,0.02133927328108681,0.06444621481979337,0.0,0.0,0.026989859273500758,0.0105206201288072,0.0,0.020142142488886242,0.0,0.04207846934246733,0.02576435897264321,0.1619000313038737,0.03642223017233882,0.02124520985812646,0.011465583263413915,0.17654617220881194,0.07439510885327916,0.10394215695372404,0.049117755231044634,0.14783260370342172,0.01005639660642643,0.01938326389732891,0.011568529856922806,0.10916175407888158,0.05875568469120735,0.04935492690265488,0.02252378311246516,0.056377676727739565,0.05246802359131065,0.024862677520148885,0.04508857611545832,0.04765658267042469,0.0,0.06445425170910264,0.04931042734069085,0.07595510285668029,0.06036013931911964,0.04111166305492821,0.011334394540889508,0.0,0.030538222176834995,0.02727329405632764,0.0,0.018418791282794646,0.060899767127444736,0.03165257557565762,0.0,0.0,0.02436511400586253,0.04823607247667319,0.05431007613428505,0.08249821655523913,0.010210952547077157,0.010124317225289994,0.04744971478346771,0.033016775309915425,0.0,0.022209617945776944,0.010730272336824512,0.02040381249917717,0.009137867022593523,0.0,0.0535282990313517,0.1016990509972505,0.025140176185323163,0.01159696126324698,0.02177133574901186,0.011169898775020913,0.021025214029970776,0.04356893837708198,0.1104967693593202,0.061823154320758765,0.07262364435259011,0.018196009754762352,0.06043178600999121,0.03450407527089065,0.0,0.0,0.10206504240436934,0.02918324850833186,0.034311891803791204,0.02084582360958264,0.05164120771246799,0.011198584047322914,0.0,0.0,0.010360423803773841,0.021812177680709383,0.0311414170539607,0.0,0.024617623447142082,0.0655598860994157,0.05290195212483857,0.04573759468387609,0.13479351379716809,0.009929064692967195,0.0,0.0,0.010072802331183905,0.04932255069167659,0.011704527880318028,0.0323632716629936,0.010948500335442294,0.16719356699418655,0.10164514512974776,0.03281784029030925,0.012062065559339244,0.194061568748243,0.10019596291071592,0.009813993157655028,0.13541815937991056,0.06283634561823229,0.010741035803298896,0.011285008355117582,0.0,0.06953897091205552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01967428590303356,0.0,0.020669679109630457,0.023033243041451903,0.0,0.030850137375523907,0.04680628060632528,0.14489230183366145,0.010570165998018535,0.010150849326019349,0.022075027650475604,0.0698754742475063,0.017559147416275876,0.01955840405442755,0.06540434725440153,0.010292671111314265,0.1040451306908579,0.04915382889090698,0.0,0.021449809675293724,0.011614148410449093,0.0,0.0,0.023111643647782704,0.051440107869239984,0.0,0.08710716518335099,0.10288857635312493,0.0203355467124979,0.023016573424319342,0.07276659505655703,0.0,0.2545130405979905,0.06016527627695335,0.07065833511489092,0.0,0.023537648021015083,0.0,0.011666299701309123,0.01937868210677545,0.0,0.023189188635650216,0.02478946345914176,0.10782833948418556,0.018929985043011237,0.011756758689144664,0.0,0.07512969052962905,0.10539826363319096,0.1010063440379836,0.07345481133199837,0.11989397627996655,0.0,0.0,0.13752971464692493,0.034266364783012995,0.05583880448456412,0.011182337442215872,0.010042649488290941,0.0428098563734829,0.19786067894641976,0.008879135028932766,0.0,0.11027340008294427,0.1697853500264366,0.06528207532460464,0.008246474837141566,0.0,0.01848698279533928,0.009530216461881751,0.08348975813422703,0.0229558389292034,0.011822179244114646,0.04955064345930802,0.0,0.03742198546717546,0.01044044533593401,0.02095361337905755,0.11684865886884566,0.01124021899858495,0.0,0.09268514412267198
mentalhealth,lovelilirose,2020/03/26,"I'm not here I haven't been feeling like i'm mentally ""here"". I've learned a little about dissociation and maybe that's what it is. If so, could anyone confirm?

I sometimes notice I say certain things only because I can almost watch myself from someone elses POV and if someone were watching me this is how I would want to look or say things. I feel very numb often and it's hard to actually have feelings. I fake emotions sometimes. I just don't know how to make it better.",3.198763157894738,5.0413600736842135,4.319144736842105,85.24713815789475,74.57894736842105,6.0131578947368425,27.66447368421053,6.6274283507984215,1.25671052631579,377,15,73,3,8,123,67,95,0.121,0.807,0.07200000000000001,-0.5224,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,8,5,0,0,1,0,10,1,0,3,1,22,19,9,0,5,5,0,4,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,8,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,9,10,3,5,15,0,1,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,5,1,48,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.181148184868048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18588171527054026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979687109485627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315837646613212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417472454243848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821051749934214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15507011594571676,0.2088088597721188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815804446282441,0.13261416935324144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16628809411689588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201743971493214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068948267769324,0.18605011129579174,0.0,0.0,0.15588251872607295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12390952274761585,0.0,0.18649037011288846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18707146436717464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21134108138510208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411800439632864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952409874488754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145675361617389,0.0,0.3671857999504196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24664875932112645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15316426034729375,0.10948943326171563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13186628593787064,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theyungjoey,2020/03/26,"Recent tragedy So the story is I got a new job in January and I've been struggling with it and I've been looking for other jobs while working. Recently my brother passed away and I was given a whole week of as berievement. I learned of his passing at this job and while I get a lot of support from coworkers and management , the work itself is draining (call center) and I find myself falling into disassociation during down times. I was starting to fall into place and chatting with coworkers but due to the pandemic we've been separate and my support system there is broken up. I was supposed to have a job interview this Wednesday but obviously it didn't happen and I was left with a day off I scheduled and had nothing to do. However on Wednesday I was offered a job interview with a different company which would be a video call on the following day. It was scheduled for 5pm. I'm curious if it would be acceptable to call in if this is the situation in order to make the interview and possibly get a better job?",4.533333333333331,6.130456171717174,6.066080808080809,75.08245454545455,70.61616161616159,9.32040404040404,33.9070707070707,9.725611199111238,3.5941107070707066,814,41,144,20,15,277,111,198,0.053,0.867,0.08,0.7269,8,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,2,5,0,1,15,0,21,0,0,1,1,29,33,19,0,4,4,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,10,17,0,0,3,2,0,5,1,1,0,0,13,1,14,4,29,16,2,37,0,0,1,0,10,15,0,3,15,110,24,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10627867600465578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000442352594804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465203042643589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459043158474007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11818489170092494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338837799937403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819963017540767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047130155360494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003043044149716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6735167114219875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229037218766829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499115908210536,0.0,0.0,0.0961694135968369,0.0,0.0,0.07550756353757726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925067720837496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854037578235913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11818489170092494,0.0,0.0,0.12752425831704425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22338199969495431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12715007898515054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006594814219836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825615218742268,0.0,0.0,0.2567313603640139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659603825074728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073694133322292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126292910080354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647034189500931,0.0,0.0,0.1607124576566845,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justkidding890,2020/03/26,"Periods I just don’t care about anything, feel empty, no motivation BUT no history of mental illness. Is this a problem ? for the past few months I’ve had stretches of time usually a few days to a week or two where I feel empty and void of motivation. I don’t want to engage with my bf who I’m usually all over, don’t want to hang out with friends (used to be the biggest extrovert), don’t want to talk because it feels heavy and burdensome, and basically just lose all interest in everything. I have a complete shift from my usual extravert bubbly happy self to someone that wants to be alone and in bed all day and doesn’t feel the need to talk or eat. 

These episodes always go away, but they’re still there and they suck. I don’t have any history of mental illness but I just know this doesn’t feel right. Do I have something?? Is this normal?? What should I do??",3.696273209549073,5.0011723850574725,4.6851724137931035,85.31168435013265,72.27586206896551,8.112466843501327,27.75243147656941,8.617729084823388,1.9110686118479228,681,25,141,12,13,222,101,174,0.17300000000000001,0.6829999999999999,0.14400000000000002,-0.7691,0,1,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,3,7,8,1,0,7,0,18,3,0,3,3,37,34,11,0,8,8,0,5,0,2,1,2,0,1,1,8,9,1,0,8,0,0,2,9,3,0,1,1,5,11,5,22,30,5,22,0,1,0,0,7,9,1,2,11,91,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177331240217114,0.0,0.0,0.11390067933345692,0.0,0.0,0.09308763302003464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264606999527912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860953716304652,0.0,0.0,0.08344484652224626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395650881450734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352307432241956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765611620002034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006924228466774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302491695443925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3460700792324477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057583055155812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779585193705206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14571841089720866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522933666473097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314117502999486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758991445495475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926163798169733,0.0,0.0,0.1014997350015001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411987767228367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067382030384947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098206099187176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690047248369452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280265586260302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598363548346635,0.10538205006561713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931787545046652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200486483229316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981972098534577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337183910286159,0.0,0.0,0.11822613655679502,0.4522839998092502,0.0,0.3229572300223327,0.0,0.10980223377966328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawya1222222,2020/03/26,"Took a test when I was younger, wondering what it was for? when i was younger i went to some doctor but he was some sort of psychologist? not sure

made me take some test i remember having to write a story about some boy with a violin who i think was crying? i wrote like a sentence and got bored and he asked me to write more

thats all i remember

wtf was this test",0.8156168831168813,2.8882777532467587,2.4156980519480515,94.88640422077923,83.15584415584415,6.447402597402598,18.715909090909093,7.645422480735847,0.3245597402597409,285,7,67,5,8,93,49,77,0.19,0.75,0.06,-0.9059,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,7,1,0,1,2,20,16,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,11,0,9,2,7,5,6,4,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,6,3,44,14,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400338291397873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28203632330998085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628024288224177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20535262164378676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12543886346795124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429503837415179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5817129397950833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24199113335010444,0.0,0.19304986818301606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16451999373071016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852672988438225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380169992959688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784428187829807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,royalmouse1,2020/03/26,"Next semester I'm going back school The same school where I tried to kill myself in November. I took all my pills, ended up in a coma for 2 weeks, had a lot of recovery, have a lot of traumatic memories there but I've taken too much time off.

I'm scared I wont make friends or that I'm too old or that things wont work for me and I'll just end up attempting again. Some useful words?",1.3914285714285732,2.733057190476192,3.4185714285714286,91.92642857142859,78.28571428571428,7.6571428571428575,20.333333333333336,8.418075326091056,0.7915190476190483,300,7,72,6,7,102,62,84,0.152,0.8,0.047,-0.8191,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,2,7,3,1,1,4,0,4,2,0,2,1,13,12,4,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,3,0,6,1,10,7,6,16,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,5,8,44,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16591934017156484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3822290889974961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16670892192908046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12263114980666533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387254909617273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668921017712782,0.0,0.0,0.14403295002955716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862106247584212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294814897702686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22642186353759974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160306100759491,0.4367560726558146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14335277724582968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12582141486927045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397363978407896,0.14649854819333344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863622121509861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17308344653948415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708836439630364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gearhead252,2020/03/26,"Need Advice for a friend This friend of mine used to be my s/o but due to some circumstances i has to break it off with her. I took the decision upon myself because of how much suffering the relationship put her through. That was a 1 to 2 years ago but nowadays we’re still talking and have a good relationship which is just fine with me. However, i notice the breakup affected her trust issues. Not with me, but with other people.She is afraid of sexual contact to the put that she said it almost makes her cry and overwhelmed and that she doesn’t like it because she makes her feel vulnerable, guilty and weaker, like the person has the advantage over her and do whatever they want.  I tried talking her and what could be the cause possibility but she does not wanna talk about it. My guess it’s because of over our breakup, because i was the person she most trusted but i went and broke it off with her with and thus feeling like she was used or feel weak because of how emotional dependent on me she was. She said she can solve it herself, that’s she doesn’t need anyone or has to do it alone. I know, i should tell her to go see a professional about it but she isn’t economically doing well and she’s the type not to go see a doctor when told so this is the closets i could think of. I plan on to tell her my thoughts on it of how it’s ok to feel weak and vulnerable, that she can open herself to people and trust others. It’s just a matter of who she should give that trust. Just want any helpful advice that can help her recovery.

Tl;dr; Former S/O  now friend breaks down and cries over sexual contact and doesn’t like feeling weak or vulnerable. Tried talking to her and helping her but does not wanna talk about it and changes subjects. My guess is because of our breakup she has trust issues. Want any helpful advice to try help her.",4.289161976235151,5.3629719593495935,4.846897018970194,85.5907833020638,70.59891598915989,7.84494475713988,26.929435063581405,8.139509932561175,1.5224795914112987,1459,47,302,20,26,466,153,369,0.107,0.684,0.209,0.9898,1,1,0,0,0,0,29.0,2,0,1,2,14,24,0,2,16,1,29,4,0,11,0,76,58,30,0,11,17,0,5,4,3,2,4,2,1,2,27,22,0,0,9,0,0,6,8,7,1,0,10,9,53,17,45,42,3,26,0,3,2,0,60,11,0,9,11,213,80,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454392279667095,0.07421532386564336,0.0,0.08383641835324193,0.0867117035973166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386892365343945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05854101771232573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30622031787626275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600650930363694,0.08856775625686007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369189036523374,0.0,0.1839314095349768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569396415899899,0.14653299648191587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417702487972043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116641392223288,0.05981167628717305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19405237880329912,0.0,0.0,0.08031466117864658,0.09516333843044324,0.07022281955870271,0.0,0.0,0.18446048776555496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805885682140049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747699692668271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04601193152763633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16361117388959587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177140873593014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061545985152968864,0.12415898010042505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531910811367494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058042936376848216,0.1462072622711688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943850213959508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16832933355978308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17977418386660074,0.0,0.0,0.15927935322618605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343266748737173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686123822133437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364665896399693,0.14635505811807048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05364627149517268,0.0,0.0664666526627614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000084529751665,0.09301925325574352,0.17052711660051292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461945674920534,0.0,0.0,0.14814585585508638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527696673386508,0.07761199277455594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05391482048349983
mentalhealth,rosebud2725,2020/03/26,"Recent Lockdown is making my anxiety worse I was diagnosed with social anxiety a few months ago, though I've had my suspicions about having it for longer than that. It can get really really bad, especially when it comes to meeting and getting to know new people. 

About a week and a half ago my partner and I moved into a new place and are now flatting with other people. They're really nice people but of course my anxiety is stopping me from talking to them or joining in with them when they're all hanging out in the evening.My partner has always been good with meeting and talking with new people so he's getting along with them great and is starting to hang out with them on his own. He knows about all my problems and he's trying to help me get through them. I know he's hoping I'll follow him when he goes out to talk to them but I can't. I'm so bad at joining in conversations and I automatically feel like they'll have more fun without me. I instead resort to playing games or browsing through my phone hoping my partner will come back to our room soon. 

Yesterday my country officially went into lockdown because of COVID-19, and my anxiety is getting really bad because I know during this lockdown time I'm gonna have to be socializing with my flatmates and I'm really scared. And I'm starting to feel really frustrated with myself because I can't get over myself. I want to talk to them, and I wish it was easy to do that but it's not. I just...don't feel ready and I don't know when I'll be ready. It takes me so long to start talking to people properly and I'm worried they're gonna start jumping to conclusions about me being a cold or unkind person if I don't open up soon. I don't know what to do and to be honest I'm starting to feel really alone. I really need help. 

(Note: I do take therapy for my social anxiety and all my other problems but obviously that's not gonna resume until the lockdown is over.)",3.8322148541114096,5.1416066794871815,5.236878868258177,81.46961538461538,71.94871794871796,8.045977011494253,28.32007073386384,8.53829466247534,2.085423519009726,1535,58,299,26,29,515,169,390,0.13,0.74,0.13,0.5076,0,5,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,0,8,1,17,17,1,1,7,0,29,1,0,1,4,69,71,33,0,8,11,0,4,1,3,5,1,0,1,4,13,34,0,1,11,2,0,8,8,8,0,1,5,5,46,9,57,57,6,50,0,0,0,0,35,16,0,6,27,197,59,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13405615187864,0.0,0.0,0.07831426652628756,0.0,0.0,0.0629176818098309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892260846606909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581432162008413,0.18940593235668568,0.13828248434198834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302711390990456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674756551790078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15293272880527442,0.05401932338788301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23703409023971886,0.0,0.0,0.06342221844339166,0.0,0.08336573079905467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136619166144956,0.0,0.0,0.15020538029987285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493359387179276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036941636904551337,0.0,0.0,0.06691683642033537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05047355507172356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060355118273066076,0.08036670737114428,0.0,0.0560675148557318,0.0,0.21908812101806585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621093693703828,0.06602404306780035,0.0790015113776471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470655810850347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3875268995203289,0.0,0.07466062428318145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570373926666688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23123970595821464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676031945404948,0.0,0.0,0.06321746996921279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370603874628607,0.3038820953238777,0.0,0.0,0.08647226602293334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742912879526992,0.0,0.044091675629104835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051337576149390614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04459964671773654,0.0,0.0606537383919556,0.0,0.0,0.07009580063158825,0.0,0.0,0.08695344147122723,0.07289009728126915,0.0,0.0,0.07679063510254466,0.07705807689701677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whotfdoistan,2020/03/26,"How do I find peace within myself? For the past two years, I've developed this self loath and since the beginning of the academic year, it's gotten significantly worse to the point where I cry at least once a week. Recently, I had a good streak of not crying for almost a week but I broke it last night. My mum was telling me to put my phone down and go to sleep and when I finally did, I broke down into tears. I just kinda thought to myself that no one hates me but myself which should be a good thing but it isn’t. It means that I’m my worst enemy and the sad part is that I can’t just run away from myself. I can’t just say to myself “Nah you good” and expect it to be ok like people tell me. It’s like I’m bullying myself and I have no idea how to stop it. Maybe that’s why I can’t put my phone down, I can’t be alone with my thoughts without crying. I know I’m the only person who can fix myself, but I’m also capable of destroying myself and I probably already have. I think I’m undeserving of love because I don’t even love myself, so how could I expect anyone else to?",1.0978765583486627,2.7302773733905603,3.22126302881668,91.72955650929904,79.98712446351932,6.49818107500511,18.391375434293888,7.447530270364453,0.18630406703453906,840,17,195,12,21,286,125,233,0.218,0.628,0.154,-0.9525,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,0,11,14,2,0,10,1,19,3,1,3,0,35,35,17,0,4,9,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,2,15,9,0,1,7,0,0,4,10,6,0,2,6,1,35,8,24,24,3,25,0,3,0,2,12,9,0,2,14,133,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000525102102065,0.1241209961142612,0.13224950776147648,0.09583824232673883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379687090153466,0.12279310899983802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259625378003768,0.0,0.0,0.07305505736906402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568472256982008,0.0,0.3949250589205573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011327990405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915503786763563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128192742718578,0.10953414630997108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810942392735264,0.30155535937992817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831995197309288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528793171704656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586246766495471,0.09768787564056283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709827529688095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21632560848525065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12039819863846035,0.1305439402294956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246434762449724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12762866870961814,0.08120858153514697,0.09114584826331247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977807172545675,0.11440351126282478,0.08308390657329945,0.1046421087314337,0.0,0.0,0.11329018080143025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921080586738629,0.0,0.0,0.24095022574711103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833030516132667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530380317108994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502217514074873,0.0,0.0,0.09913520099325934,0.0,0.11992934711573963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019394540033433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20949577561451185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961822988688053,0.07679042596970716,0.0,0.1902835902104883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706899988473372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19226132762761164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813948491257958,0.0,0.0,0.1155241807491063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12213004970041515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15434966552636534
mentalhealth,KaiMakhnov,2020/03/26,"Socially withdrawing First off I want to say I've never made a post on Reddit so there's a little bit of anxiety I'm feeling right now. I've casually browsed here and there since roughly 2016 and I'm not entirely sure what's allowed in this group so I apologize if this ain't it. And for an age context, I recently turned 19.

I guess a little bit of backstory, I was a pretty happy kid for the most part. There's some really dark memories I cant fully remember but overall it wasn't too bad I think. Things got a little glum around 2015 when I was in my freshman year and I went on antidepressants for the first time, so that was my first time really acknowledging any sort of mental health issues, but I didn't stay on them very long. 

I guess things started to kind of get bad in early 2019 or so? I used to be really active in the local music scene ever since I was 13. It was really honestly the only social interaction I had through middle school and high school. I didn't have many friends I talked to in school so every weekend I would go out to shows and see friends there. In late 2017 I met a girl in the local scene and quickly got romantically involved with her. I'll spare a lot of the details but I was given a drug, and nearly was r***d. It completely destroyed my social life. I really don't know what it was but part of me honestly wants to assume it was because of her decent sized online following. I kept trying to go to local shows but would end up seeing her and having silent panic attacks. Eventually I decided to stop going. It just all became too much. It also ended up destroying my band I was playing in, which hurt in a very weird way. That left me with about 3 friends I occassionally would spend time with. 

Fast forward to last Fall, I lost my mom to an overdose. My parents were addicts before they had me and had gotten clean. My mom had struggled for the past few years though. This absolutely changed everything. Me and my elderly dad ended up moving into a small rv. At this point things got really bad. My two best friends recently had a child, and my mom spent her last months constantly buying clothing, toys, and things like that. She constantly was talking about how excited she was and she missed her birth by 2 months. What messes with me about this in particular is I can't hold my best friends kid without the sinking feeling in my gut that feels like hard, hard guilt. That feeling while I'm around them, along with what I feel like is intensifying feelings of distance between us. It's happened with every one of my few friends at this point. I find myself frequently asking myself ""why did I come out here?"" And the feeling that I should have stayed home. It's not a negative feeling towards any one of my friends, just an internal conflict.

I feel like it was started with the isolation from the music scene, and was ramped up with losing my mom. I really worry I'll end up being some sort of hermit. I've never been an extrovert but this is so much worse than it was. 

Thank you for reading and whatever someone might have to say. This was actually kind of cathartic (idk if that's the right word.",3.4912768733689568,5.394559462035545,4.5507229402261755,83.63821812476702,73.92730210016154,7.669454455076425,25.797222567416426,8.44344225975766,1.767164757052317,2493,86,484,45,52,813,296,619,0.136,0.737,0.127,-0.8503,2,1,1,0,0,0,58.0,1,1,3,7,28,38,3,3,28,0,45,5,1,4,5,91,90,37,0,8,14,6,12,4,7,5,4,2,2,4,36,32,0,4,16,8,3,9,13,15,0,6,38,16,67,23,76,45,15,95,0,4,2,0,44,44,0,13,44,326,103,4,0.0,0.0,0.0547486529513042,0.06116079454128433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04486572740163852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07630423140788427,0.0,0.04291881226146944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998875266180482,0.05244894040490804,0.06382551582542696,0.0,0.0,0.14053154406114335,0.03420000419098903,0.0,0.047739710828699385,0.0,0.11775374311425413,0.0,0.1225003784673095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059349771227036725,0.04832795915208473,0.05882316221915253,0.12125530669919705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506192743078326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19876321409143285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05074857744292489,0.09453877068099237,0.0,0.0504219595432559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553072787130896,0.1202404618015039,0.0,0.0,0.0512773296985149,0.14316411923004932,0.0,0.0,0.3034164780482104,0.0,0.029311618597902787,0.0,0.0956542640981223,0.0,0.1346126183944791,0.0,0.12360805119148913,0.0,0.0496118950784204,0.05972292443560531,0.10051493655728667,0.0,0.0,0.059635102860464174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0592761356947283,0.05627610734482047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06005966089465711,0.0,0.0,0.0585571890477863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11684574733591163,0.030832864298374712,0.09146322997019003,0.06328687956421195,0.0,0.060956316268772535,0.0,0.03962736578459725,0.10963680407995344,0.1686905057697019,0.0,0.04964958715299046,0.0,0.0627651562213913,0.06124329561898116,0.04769695417745799,0.0,0.0530862264034776,0.0,0.056879862674779985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05653885346514032,0.05951665400000429,0.0,0.2628296682418941,0.08956211516051292,0.05962884761554469,0.08248464888684305,0.0,0.08654052892239499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603399213871245,0.042669029425970235,0.0,0.06582504442511165,0.062295990103254886,0.12150864722443128,0.05355687484969797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607136036135753,0.0,0.05373137955587931,0.0570771475666212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05611840562670319,0.0,0.2515881301475239,0.0,0.11079032932638792,0.0,0.06355401532653984,0.0958236923068722,0.0,0.08923106996966633,0.0,0.17033837155625878,0.08941401051892839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281833213314873,0.0,0.0,0.1715705127195062,0.047536079038304584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942030042364259,0.11959714252793295,0.0,0.0469048068129258,0.0,0.05865127030650333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052876624003711986,0.0,0.0,0.0901872914687356,0.0,0.05165231030675863,0.0,0.0,0.14908995455602791,0.035948680140300934,0.05512113203837203,0.0,0.09814272202518692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03809040590684396,0.0610241965017782,0.05480469704467338,0.0,0.06748526981945192,0.0484551717001347,0.0,0.0925820696509367,0.06618226937075956,0.04453212726362624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052008250071114814,0.05062443272801717,0.0,0.0,0.054081505210795626,0.0,0.0,0.05697554657408551,0.057173977572819334,0.1195623604517278,0.0,0.0,0.07225727277458546
mentalhealth,swarm_of_rasberries,2020/03/26,"I can't tell if this is normal and I'm just making it worse myself or if something is actually wrong As a teenager, who's supposes to be going through all that ""teenage angst"" stuff, is it normal to be suicidal sometimes? Or more accurately just wishing I never existed and thinkinh that I'm ruining the lives of everyone around me? I've never really had any big life goals, like there's things i want to do in the future but nothing that feels productive or achievable so it sorta feels like I'm just floating. When I feel bad its usually because I went down a bad thought path, so it kind of feels like I'm making myself feel this way. 

All of my friends are also young and most have bad mental health problems, so talking talking to them about this doesn't amount to much. My mom has diagnosed mental illnesses, so it feels? disrespectful maybe to tell her this, if I'm just lazy and making myself feel bad. 

Sorry this turned into a rant of sorts and this doesn't make sense. Even typing this now I can't really tell if this is actually stuff i feel all the time or I'm just convincing myself that i do to feel special or something.",4.545916666666667,5.745279,5.365486111111114,81.6415625,70.1111111111111,8.469444444444445,28.284722222222207,8.841846274778883,2.1535388888888893,905,32,175,16,16,295,120,225,0.17600000000000002,0.723,0.102,-0.9655,0,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,2,16,14,0,0,6,0,16,4,0,4,5,49,41,22,1,9,15,1,9,3,1,0,4,0,0,0,22,7,0,0,10,0,0,2,6,7,0,0,3,9,17,7,18,36,7,16,0,1,0,0,10,5,0,12,11,116,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.1928406953606684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790150771169619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671914296080742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795823756620312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3299953419367033,0.0602311859197167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028595254686287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526039365354973,0.0,0.0,0.09441331300811254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44963328322856333,0.14117397119592845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633722665383477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05615369453108317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050260972972756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289118522347776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978955975419351,0.14481477896842904,0.0,0.08724745809583069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26381493743218304,0.0,0.09926385041294776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991463027740644,0.0,0.0,0.1157203265582201,0.0,0.0,0.07263373704402934,0.0,0.15241046925043242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19361769178772092,0.09480696735645022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454394365319913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659523462950756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15213128466623524,0.0977216043326358,0.11060516410321357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22621833180583806,0.10807766505861616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883294895853645,0.2590822483381463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564227829825993,0.0,0.0,0.0784408822070982,0.05761454008362955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747249341180956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882078728797026,0.0,0.05827830530075315,0.07842755871131342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159409928428568,0.0,0.0,0.1136219585119738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006916973965028,0.0,0.10802878812368766,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nijelous,2020/03/26,"I don't want to be competitive any more I've been competitive my whole life, for as long as I can remember. I cried when I lost at sports day, I prided myself on being the best at maths in primary school, I always wanted to be the best at something, like that would give me purpose. Even now, leaving a very competitive grammar school (selective school), and with top grades in the subjects I care about, I wanted to be the best, but eventually gave up as I got beaten by so many people over and over and over, eventually just going for my own goals and not comparing myself to others. However, being competitive has ruined the one pastime I've had my whole life, video games. I can't enjoy them, I don't remember ever fully enjoying one properly without getting frustrated, it never felt right, no pure enjoyment, mostly just a feeling that I'm doing something. Tonight it just broke, as I had several bad games in a row with my friends, I just couldn't take it, and I don't want to put my emotional baggage on them any more, since all I'm doing is complaining at this point whenever something goes wrong and it brings everyone down. They all seem to have so much fun playing games, any games, whether that be fps, fighting, moba, whatever it is. Yet I can't get into fps or fighting games because after loosing one too many matches I quit because I hate feeling like shit. I don't know whether this is just a complete psychological thing, my brain being my worst enemy, or a competitive drive going the wrong way, I just want a simple solution that will help me stop being so competitive and allow me to actually have fun.

I wanna cry so hard, but even then my brain is saying not to because ""this is a stupid thing to be upset about, people have much worse issues than you"", and it sucks. I don't understand my brain, most of the stuff here is just splurging a stream of consciousness onto a page while my brain plays ping-pong as to what's wrong with me.",11.330964945344894,7.106603854881264,10.753081417263477,66.1854683377309,59.26385224274407,13.99479834150019,41.847154165096114,11.491704259439757,4.580049981153412,1547,56,292,30,14,507,195,379,0.207,0.623,0.16899999999999998,-0.9778,1,0,3,0,4,0,47.0,0,1,3,9,21,33,8,1,16,0,35,7,5,1,5,54,61,26,0,8,16,0,4,2,1,2,2,1,0,0,18,12,0,1,9,9,0,5,13,18,0,3,7,5,41,15,45,42,16,37,0,3,0,0,17,19,2,5,14,212,59,7,0.0,0.0,0.08161104334763047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958705311751355,0.0,0.0,0.17061427819718056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982775110031393,0.15294064095069912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632943090542526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734359916632443,0.0,0.0,0.08526659594074015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768470789558665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18372776738225366,0.0539345815604328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407275551032858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047395997783888,0.07564833343404598,0.0,0.07991227127746621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457191696083825,0.059745454979198,0.08029813840172496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461251036076339,0.0,0.08738668979163154,0.08022573971309048,0.09505797705063708,0.0,0.06688673688891904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491626188280164,0.08256754080967836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056055582155628586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728823516342678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0459609887940873,0.0,0.0,0.08855234121877194,0.0,0.0,0.11814101324741855,0.08171501478057466,0.0,0.0,0.07401012428449417,0.0,0.0,0.09129227814897968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957585942753894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295568736285906,0.0,0.06450079112900077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17001003021512806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595734670647002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07905760161891498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407148272845835,0.0,0.0889510467672664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894735019085674,0.07141976181169095,0.0,0.0665061177461939,0.0,0.25391478101218684,0.0,0.07613382295414828,0.0,0.0944783585962772,0.0858452321083431,0.06917979273308053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314791689906613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699186192841432,0.0,0.0,0.09573660812882742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287952710921033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112042112515946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870620216603691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900370047657904,0.2466363902718154,0.06638178608168703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18674033649168734,0.0,0.08061656000904778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852263518922005,0.05940851786953135,0.2743095930202428,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MattJones6412,2020/03/26,"Coronavirus placebo? So I tried to go to sleep earlier. But when I actually lied down I noticed It was much harder to breath than normal, the k felt kinda hot and then I started dry coughing. The coughs been here for a few days and the hottness has been here for a little bit but not too long. But now in wondering is this just all on my head? Ive been fill of so much anxiety and fear over coronavirus or COVID-19 if you will that I'm wondering if it's just the placebo effect or not?",3.7050571428571435,4.589117220000002,4.8494285714285725,85.73900000000002,71.8,8.514285714285714,28.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.002471428571429,382,14,82,7,7,126,71,100,0.095,0.905,0.0,-0.8445,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,9,1,0,1,6,0,8,5,3,1,1,21,14,14,0,3,11,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,5,3,7,0,11,8,5,13,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,7,6,61,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.22052025835154296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17287124080401967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467075777352927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14573601037211015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542861476890166,0.0,0.0,0.2169726730495287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842753135927254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23191686431826905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22648760537770124,0.0,0.1999819026737185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33223714378400315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22140878166095845,0.0,0.2572755001728844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261394840753927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15994717882242998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342306519876256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4901232868542565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaliAnthroSG,2020/03/26,"SURVEY: Self-Quarantine Risks & Repercussions: Physical Safety, Mental Health, and Nonconforming Identities. [Help a Graduate Student with Research] Hey guys! Since I know everyone is spending way too much time at home on the internet and hopefully feeling bored enough to complete a survey about the how the recently imposed self-isolation ordinances have impacted your interpersonal relationships, your identity, and your overall wellbeing - I thought I'd try to enlist the reddit community for help.

The survey data will be used for research purposes (unpublished graduate coursework in preparation for creating my thesis project) and since current research and mainstream media are purely concerned with economic or respiratory illness effects (therefore there are ZERO peer-reviewed journals to gain relevant information) - I thought I would try to utilize my own survey to try to understand some of the social symptoms of the current global crisis.

TAKE IT HERE: https://forms.gle/e4WjdsmvwHzopSm88


Read about it below:
Firstly,
THANK YOU! I appreciate your time & effort to provide much need info regarding the sidelined conversations concerning recently imposed self-isolation ordinances. 

This survey will ask you questions regarding the impact of this current global crisis on your physical, mental, emotional, sexual, financial, psychological, and social wellbeing.

This research is for a graduate seminar course and will not be published. I am hoping to further investigate this topic for my future thesis project. The purpose of this survey is to provide a preliminary understanding surrounding the traumas and trials of people existing outside of the media's current attention - since there are currently no supplementary publications on this topic thus yet, I figured I'd try to gather some of my own data.

Secondly,
Please note that this survey is 100% ANONYMOUS. If you choose to email me outside of the survey, all of your personal information will be kept private.

Thirdly,
Please feel free to skip ANY question that doesn't pertain to you or makes you feel uncomfortable. You can answer as many or as few questions as you so choose.

Thank you again for being willing to share your story!

Fourthly,
SHARE THIS SURVEY! Again, there isn't ANY academic information currently available on this topic which means people are suffering in silence while the world's attention is elsewhere. There are many more ways this virus can hurt people than just causing a respiratory infection. The topics discussed in this survey are an extremely important part of maintaining a 'healthy population' and hopefully the more popular this gets - the more visible it becomes.

Thank you!
Sophia G.
San Diego State University, Graduate Student - Anthropology Department",10.210927789286767,12.816386133027521,9.27314294169873,53.62924089967447,58.082568807339456,12.598283515833087,44.33974548683042,12.073905160250206,6.81872012429713,2278,132,261,76,31,716,236,436,0.069,0.812,0.12,0.9673,6,3,0,0,0,0,68.0,0,16,0,4,14,15,0,1,24,0,27,4,0,7,2,56,49,19,0,6,6,0,3,0,0,6,4,0,1,2,18,11,0,1,23,1,2,1,4,5,0,4,3,3,28,11,47,36,13,34,1,2,0,0,38,14,0,12,16,189,46,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19597526469896887,0.0,0.12299949391981745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454567993679801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987972603786406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290293416976443,0.0,0.0,0.09482068097958056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017286018644981,0.0,0.09344481495435894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641570648986224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13718184647756884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692502275809998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04724920475563858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954609970610722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09612949814648734,0.0,0.0,0.12123501578023856,0.0,0.09071492622983184,0.2694707873373322,0.0,0.0,0.09681386941111852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049701394468231776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036689497068594,0.18337631332208806,0.0,0.09851158176746844,0.0,0.0,0.1822769257931459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296208980865534,0.06705732884782425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979336390638384,0.0,0.18809131335167886,0.07896543977832088,0.0,0.19854367634763426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039278710137989,0.0,0.09046071710982874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17858976084185516,0.09709468099803276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830341770167101,0.0,0.0,0.2244293861862918,0.0,0.0,0.18437672325366697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399788470451974,0.06799680039156993,0.0,0.0,0.2497846283344213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14359255146638072,0.10546820203179454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456010925369539,0.0,0.0,0.1882946383564493,0.0,0.07810787798982541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435681617004786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424331283722133,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ylwnyzelciweeivkas,2020/03/26,"I'm suddenly having trouble enjoying things in life, what now? Hey everyone,

A throwaway account, just in case someone would recognise me. I'm writing here, because honestly I'm getting out of ideas as of what I can do and would appreciate constructive feedback.

So - a bit about myself. I'm a guy in my mid-20's , working in software engineering. Obviously, my life had ups and downs, but overall, I've had a considerably stable upbringing and a pretty happy life for most part. Honestly I always considered and prided myself of being in good mental and emotional place, usually not letting myself get ""out of stable equilibrium"" for too long. I still do, and I still feel there's something I can do for myself that will help me alleviate the way I feel on the daily basis now.

The reason I'm here is that - for some time now - I've been seeing a slow but consistent drop in any motivation to do ANYTHING of substance. I feel like a mindless zombie and that my brain is going into some sort of ""rest mode"" and I feel like I am about to have my brain go to sleep in a second whatever I do. This worries me a lot, as usually I tended to be a very driven person, with a burning passion to engineering, and would basically learn and create stuff and it was always such a huge pleasure to develop each day further.. yet, now, while the idea sounds nice on paper, when I sit to anything, I just sort of ""block"" - I quickly get disoriented, and soon enough I find myself doing something else, probablly very mundane like browsing reddit or news channel. Sometimes ( much more rarely  though )  I will get into something and then I will dig at it like there's no tomorrow, but until then, it feels like hitting your head into the wall.

And then, there's other things - I notice that whatever I do, I just .. kinda don't care. At work, I've been changing jobs a year ago, and I've been assigned a project that I had to deliver by myself and it worked out absolutely GREAT - I learnt tons, I worked a lot at this and delivered a nice product, however, due to some company circumstances I was transferred to another team and i HATE it. So now, I'm kinda just dragging myself every day to work and counting my days until I leave as I agreed another job which - I hope - will help a bit. Still the problem persists - I just do - not - care about all this anymore. I cannot force myself to care about my job anymore. I cannot force myself to care about learning anymore. I just can't feel like I care about anything except of perhaps my loved ones, and I'm grateful for that, but I am just so concerned that I'm losing myself somewhere along the way.

I noticed that sometimes other activities that I was focusing on some time ago seem to help a bit ( volunteering as an anonymous listener for people who want to talk, volunteering in animal shelters etc ).. it seems that caring about other people is the only thing right now that gives me satisfaction and I am so glad I didn't lose that, but I just feel so saddened by the fact that all those things I always cared for, that always had driven me now suddenly seem to be so bland.  


So yeah, there goes. Honestly, I really would like to be able to sort it out somehow, to feel ANYTHING really, to at least feel there's a problem that I need to vent out and work through, but I just can't seem to be feeling anything, because in theory everything is fine - Landed a lovely job at top-tier software company, have a lovely relationship, am well settled in whatever direction one might think, and yet, I feel like this drags me even further as I feel literally zero motivation to work towards anything, probably if I cared about improving something in particular I could at least feel I am doing something with my life, when in fact I feel like I'm staying put every single day.",7.540028273162242,6.8907626707989005,7.9194548354356975,72.31257938234019,63.47658402203857,10.78260113092649,35.90967087139336,10.125756701596842,3.5859151515151506,2993,122,540,57,38,988,304,726,0.07400000000000001,0.7040000000000001,0.221,0.9990000000000001,5,0,5,0,0,0,98.0,0,1,0,16,53,42,1,0,31,1,55,12,4,3,5,115,111,52,0,11,20,0,14,9,0,9,4,2,0,2,39,35,0,1,28,2,1,5,9,6,1,4,13,17,74,36,92,81,23,88,0,2,1,4,17,39,0,21,48,398,113,21,0.04794604117284877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500254520229067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15957978853235005,0.0,0.0,0.03260495213734579,0.10055120932414706,0.0,0.0,0.14264876807363722,0.0,0.0,0.2367330397067268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058454923359807474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15703397713487766,0.0,0.0,0.1070472773134841,0.0,0.0,0.3910734752948493,0.0,0.050720554142689576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03828101247164166,0.0,0.0,0.12368492031786428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04005276509828832,0.053932842958740984,0.0,0.04954107731623957,0.053472509871329885,0.031667908004782815,0.0,0.08079321516784893,0.04581449702311202,0.04309081022757473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33940142648074634,0.20551596836373104,0.0,0.0,0.04382181301621044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019931045176668,0.04599421158360652,0.05449768023096475,0.04021486455126975,0.0,0.05286067965746035,0.0,0.0474741188269753,0.0,0.05103945238151042,0.0,0.04733678935862465,0.049206470676556084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641166221696533,0.0,0.0,0.047621237256332084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082504889439134,0.0,0.0,0.19031619067413294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05076793474021831,0.0,0.049028075542913135,0.13546282725310402,0.21081612482071135,0.0,0.0,0.04243073766404427,0.0,0.1072787119001131,0.0,0.08152401927699665,0.12981952229077132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048318332472996516,0.0508631728343338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03524585700424737,0.03555138200758561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917377131901908,0.0,0.0,0.0649789567040417,0.03646512484331264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0519208902825913,0.0,0.06647949595933426,0.041864633787111666,0.05009340823095583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048778360785732666,0.05169394170810298,0.09175577229623487,0.0,0.04819901416414471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0614309234077548,0.049296515727569504,0.0,0.05147610491463418,0.0,0.04094565718889465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03820678721988359,0.17459310062556185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04798066723037689,0.0,0.04062452509497028,0.18455602463247306,0.09483972139409147,0.0,0.0,0.05110410046648682,0.1148693112451898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054886746153063125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03853721173097538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741287718300953,0.03072188720727105,0.047106742016976434,0.0,0.05591544435947514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056115811724355,0.07912101056648084,0.02827981732283822,0.07611467155697989,0.0,0.0,0.043109249102454415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24433702305899774,0.048691532167250834,0.0,0.1362379680402667,0.0,0.0,0.030875678542606564
mentalhealth,Stormy-skiezz,2020/03/26,"my anxiety disorder is messing up every aspect of my life. i don't know if anyone else experiences this but, my anxiety can make me act out of line sometimes. it'll give off an abrasive vibe and it makes me just draw so much attention to myself when it's the exact opposite of what i want. it's such a bad struggle i face every day and i can't get get any help for it, im only 16.
but an example of just how bad it's making me act as a person: my boyfriend's friend group was ok with me at first. in fact, we were all incredibly chill with each other and i had a ton of fun being in xbox parties with them. it's been almost a year since i started dating him, but i didn't actually talk to most of them until november when i bought my xbox one. im super sensitive because of my GAD. there's been times they've mad a joke that i took too seriously or was overthinking about. and it'd make me incredibly sad or panicked and typically in response id just get off my xbox and cry for a minute.
i sat with him and his friends at lunch since the beginning of the school year. the first few days of school i couldn't even bring myself to come sit with them out of fear they wouldn't like me. when my anxiety acts up i end up being pissed off and totally unpleasant to be around. and one day it became too much for one of them and shortly after i left an xbox party a friend just started talking mad shit about me. was kinda ruthless about it. and also made it clear he wasn't the only one that thought i was annoying as hell. it's been about a month since this happened.

i don't know what to do. my anxiety skyrocketed when my depression faded. ive gotten close to illegally obtaining Lexapro from one of my friends to calm me down. can't be annoying if im a fuckin zombie, right? i need so much help and i can't get any of it. i was gonna join a support group my school was starting till coronavirus canceled basically the rest of my second semester. i feel so alone and hopeless. my parents aren't taking it seriously but they were rushing to get me some assistance when i was depressed. i don't know what im doing wrong , the only difference between how i behaved with depression and anxiety was i was actually self harming when i was depressed and that's when it was actually clear to my parents it's a problem. i tried telling them school is hard asf because of my anxiety but im getting a ""you'll be even more anxious if you don't graduate"". i feel so fucking lost.


TL;DR: my anxiety makes me annoying and unpleasant. my parents won't take it seriously when i say it's a huge problem for me. it's the worst it's ever been and has only gotten worse over the last three years. i don't know what to do.",2.437764250768005,4.065934274509806,4.314660750180149,85.38823643190355,76.1301247771836,7.769120491523495,26.37467288656275,8.529434386809921,1.8074121515530777,2132,81,452,42,47,725,244,561,0.249,0.648,0.10400000000000001,-0.9984,3,1,0,0,0,1,43.0,1,2,7,5,31,41,10,2,25,1,48,7,3,8,7,77,88,46,0,9,14,3,3,1,4,5,1,1,0,2,30,30,1,0,8,5,1,7,14,30,0,9,28,4,73,11,62,48,13,59,1,7,0,2,32,21,5,9,31,309,103,5,0.0,0.0,0.18595996179842786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360640911364893,0.06578787837420899,0.0,0.05079716427658475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639197004712508,0.0,0.34015001166469433,0.07175986334963733,0.0,0.04441487357976533,0.06508405808019578,0.0,0.0565465377767777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607360143465618,0.0774427756669386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05471711754997357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977407142107138,0.12289602381224154,0.0,0.2188397795361618,0.0,0.0,0.06636519822536749,0.07279977169279084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053063063366875766,0.0,0.05626013564852937,0.0,0.0,0.08390912362882008,0.057457751706419286,0.1070371917031119,0.0,0.0,0.062135046045878176,0.0,0.07147800186039467,0.06423554869597158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108060676515051,0.0,0.0,0.19630251765818066,0.058723497630758736,0.199120423275592,0.06093446377001083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05617079517759407,0.0,0.056901715855881975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515264183750923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430641430848952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13963639183747956,0.05177752582133679,0.0,0.0,0.06901499631291416,0.0,0.044866269337137415,0.031032812071412775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933991553390514,0.0,0.0,0.060104447639980525,0.2120014813046796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05070130075056832,0.0,0.14008419686231452,0.047099500661669465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152150100398058,0.19324021455132198,0.0,0.0,0.21159534190001572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05546347948824863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215607049272063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424599267194016,0.0,0.050513895375504735,0.0,0.2571437559331968,0.0,0.0,0.06626553048822661,0.0,0.06520267939493328,0.1576339559717236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06282320501071455,0.0,0.1348799946359997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640521363041625,0.0,0.0,0.07208208839562143,0.0,0.0,0.09551872703733756,0.1021104287329638,0.055519545594649534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05042802620537905,0.03703920016449306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057339512169353,0.043126116933102115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03746592113985072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473261661653591,0.0,0.06944948099963741,0.0,0.1227149798258224
mentalhealth,BehindTheS3ea,2020/03/26,"I’ve been struggling to deal with some trauma lately I guess to start, I haven’t had the easiest upbringing. I’m only 15 so I’m yet to leave my home. I’ve had many traumatic experiences starting as early as like 6 or 7 years old. I never really processed how much this all effected me until I was older. 

I also never really had a method of dealing with these memories. I would just let them sit there in my mind. I did eventually open up to close friends about them and being able to talk to them did help. 

Lately though, I just can’t get it off my mind. I’ve been having a really tough time sleeping with some disturbing nightmares when I do manage to fall asleep. Whenever I hear yelling or somebody even mentions yelling, I feel scared and start to tear up. I get a feeling like I’m sinking and it’s like I’m feeling all those emotions again. I can almost hear the yelling too. These traumatic memories are linked to yelling so it makes sense I’ve developed this fear. I just don’t know what I can do to overcome this and finally deal with this trauma.",2.0282289879931383,4.398605570754722,3.419125214408236,87.71258147512863,80.55660377358491,6.873413379073758,24.2590051457976,8.00094639256281,1.50181320754717,839,31,168,16,22,274,121,212,0.13699999999999998,0.772,0.091,-0.892,0,0,1,0,4,0,17.0,0,0,3,1,15,11,0,4,5,0,20,2,2,3,4,34,37,15,0,1,5,0,3,3,1,1,0,6,1,0,11,10,0,0,6,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,8,9,22,4,23,26,5,25,0,0,0,0,12,6,0,6,20,108,33,1,0.1253819998434965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255519614509085,0.0,0.0,0.10026793997557527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3877900090005205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410378738681252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281362839082594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264765476642055,0.0,0.14108960809483134,0.19019071928533013,0.08957292574070204,0.0,0.13734985220481571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968698220555871,0.0,0.131013839934049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812240851926355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826292526196107,0.0,0.08404091155596959,0.0,0.1257683688664193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890666809141241,0.0,0.2828727141579395,0.1327614341026622,0.0,0.12821158973036487,0.0,0.1837659355022717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369345850271871,0.12711766835826488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532001549031015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217019652277313,0.0,0.1934046556688244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315673173131814,0.0,0.0,0.09535866081027793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409687590680173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12552925491006164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12547254922428727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662380744805152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107648958721538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007773020884605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123187178247051,0.0,0.07311125240407615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906777530350199,0.0,0.0,0.08074189708887132
mentalhealth,strangeducks,2020/03/26,"constant cry baby For the past 10 days, I have been feeling a lot of negative emotions. I feel like every day has been a train wreck. One day, before hanging out with a close friend, I remembered why I had been upset with her that I just cried and felt uncomfortable around her again. Some other day, I would be just crying about how my mom would make fun of me for something so small. Another time, I had accidentally gone too far by being very visibly upset at my dad and getting upset at him for leaving our dog out all night. I would find myself in a crying session every day for what seems like any little thing. If I felt like anything was unfair or that my privacy was violated, I could only cry. My mom noticed because I tried to control something else in my life that she called me stupid for being so narrow-minded. I don't know what to do because I don't want to lash out on my parents and I have been trying to keep this feeling to myself but I can't help but get very upset around them. So I try to keep it pent in until I can just cry in my room. I usually can handle their joking remarks in my dispense or just how I lack as a person in general. I just already don't feel like I am good enough and their reminders are not helping me. 

I have been in my own apartment before this break. Last week was my spring break but I am staying home till the rest of the semester due to the corona virus. Asking to go back would only upset my parents further. My parents aren't actually terrible people. They have been doing so many things in thoughts of my well-being whether it be in education or my health etc. I don't want to talk about being upset with them because they either turn it into how selfish I am or how the things I am going through aren't actually as hard as it is reasonable to be as upset as I am. 

I know that I am terribly inconvenient and unappreciative right now. I feel like I feel so irritable, that I just fill up with constant negative emotions. I want to stop feeling like shit and I want to just deal and appreciate the people around me instead of getting annoyed with everyone. 

I miss my friends from school and I know everyone has to stay in isolation. I just feel like I am going crazy.",4.761717952682852,5.37289069058296,5.832594711612806,80.63800448430497,69.22421524663677,8.393876604298747,29.504870882944175,8.433251757073789,2.076331003556517,1752,63,346,25,29,583,210,446,0.21,0.696,0.094,-0.9945,3,2,2,0,0,0,32.0,1,0,6,1,27,27,4,7,11,0,48,3,1,7,1,81,80,33,0,11,19,6,11,7,2,4,2,0,2,1,17,21,0,4,18,1,0,6,10,15,0,1,15,11,70,12,61,54,9,60,0,1,0,0,26,29,1,8,28,259,87,2,0.0,0.0,0.12609538209787452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129608548835176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04393537875543568,0.06774669454143116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05316654414758547,0.17254336623017807,0.06039937810769445,0.0,0.0,0.04967925105844105,0.0,0.11815256715212775,0.0,0.10995260620459682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597157605498799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13963571161494662,0.07246290928862671,0.05158390587412308,0.0,0.4258104432883835,0.2083327632873968,0.06660759151354358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053971353719001164,0.14534969244967044,0.0,0.0667569143077569,0.07205454448466182,0.0,0.0,0.1088693672763605,0.12347064769309395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26134032225275405,0.2307783868821249,0.12406684228241152,0.0,0.059050169572609536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998313322320721,0.0,0.10126440234877973,0.0,0.1101539520202607,0.054189783754806375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578757131385858,0.0,0.0,0.0686748502134348,0.0,0.0,0.08661021548915179,0.0,0.06480668359948295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148523944656857,0.0,0.0,0.10651993049948248,0.05266381138753727,0.0,0.06841011242853208,0.0,0.0,0.045634253637120745,0.22094804552368327,0.06475378124899163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054927065212552466,0.0,0.0,0.04312607003986002,0.06550195877906215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523525141513807,0.1513352642351621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060629849428925735,0.0,0.0,0.07355617289139335,0.0,0.0,0.0437797771010243,0.09827397167193684,0.0,0.0,0.2152172588307,0.0,0.0616752580574664,0.08958154031756156,0.05641285821081081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06642736602374201,0.0,0.0,0.07318780841587183,0.055174531445601416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538633339046232,0.0,0.05881632621140843,0.0,0.0,0.0663187658186981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994761631260017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772619573203965,0.0,0.054014840717300006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05192913599279565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12876724202295595,0.0,0.0,0.05129121213496608,0.03767320706166838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13159294415952047,0.07027450868929731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115613604070636,0.10661606102373336,0.15242892919818565,0.0,0.05182431406612432,0.0,0.0580899852022584,0.0,0.058298303649637125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18358152165063485,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ironicallymacaroni,2020/03/26,"How can we support friends quarantined in bad family situations? I think a lot of people tend to forget that while quarantine has brought many families together and made us realize that “family comes first”, not everyone has a happy family. Unable to leave the house and see friends who may have otherwise brought solace and peace, I can only imagine how trapped and helpless some people must feel and how easy it must be to fall into unhealthy coping mechanisms.
How can we best support friends and loved ones quarantined in less-than-ideal family situations and to anyone in such a situation: how do you cope?",13.6575,10.05268789814815,12.312222222222225,54.88000000000001,54.27777777777778,16.725925925925928,48.2962962962963,14.554592549557764,6.9670851851851845,495,23,76,16,4,159,74,108,0.145,0.635,0.221,0.9034,0,4,0,0,0,0,9.0,3,1,0,2,6,10,0,0,4,0,11,1,0,6,2,28,22,13,0,2,1,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,4,11,0,0,4,0,0,4,1,2,0,2,3,2,6,8,9,15,3,10,0,1,1,1,9,4,0,3,2,54,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913807141542375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644177837175252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378403308752929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981407665286548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181409446052148,0.0,0.0,0.6008913498377071,0.0,0.06445850754012994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843575050482572,0.0,0.0,0.2954758129607881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13570649199702328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470966051779401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349845660182797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838026422072987,0.1150570858475225,0.12062613521786565,0.0,0.12924629364373455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638480485662887,0.09695547153856472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675932568664754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158629887583574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.429883846870536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28932912897489504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168503669011354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153344621269258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ABiDisaster,2020/03/26,"Help. How does one calm down from slight yet persistant suicidal thoughts.

No, I'm not going to try to off myself anytime soon as I'm determined to keep on living for as long as I can.
But right now I just cant shut up those little voices and thoughts, I just had a rough conversation with my parents and really need some advice right now. My hands are  shaking lile crazy and I cant really think too clearly.

Sorry for rambling I just really need some advice.",2.517313797313797,4.8569992417582455,3.784102564102565,85.94145299145298,78.56043956043956,7.121367521367523,22.1990231990232,8.167268648758528,1.3205228327228324,365,11,71,7,9,119,64,91,0.128,0.762,0.11,-0.1868,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,9,2,0,1,1,0,5,1,1,1,1,19,14,8,1,2,5,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,3,3,8,1,14,11,2,15,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,2,5,47,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3904114756705212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17481363064349145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352971067669505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389668539973568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17755821114547912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002146427502081,0.17639406912779082,0.1767836484188794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962429297080124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536433337013534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22181276912503956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3839191832493062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34119240264330475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22361791837285894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21850790312515464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799983233421375,0.0,0.31717844165238746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13562571840161464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rinkaisa,2020/03/26,"How to get an emotional support animal? Hello, 

I'm currently searching for how I can get an emotional support animal. I suffer from GAD (Generalized Anxiety Disorder) and I was wondering if I needed to get a letter of recommendation from a psychiatrist or can I get one from an MFT (Marriage Family Therapist?) I'm uncomfortable with taking medication, since I've had bad experiences in the past and am looking for other methods. When I can afford it, I work with my therapist through CBT and talk therapy, but I'm interested in getting a cat. Also, before people come down my throats, I have taken care of animals since I was little, I know how to take care of a cat and can provide for one, if need be. Most housing just does not permit animals most of the time.",6.3912499999999985,7.094363958333332,8.350000000000005,63.69500000000001,65.66666666666666,12.233333333333334,36.138888888888886,11.855464076750405,4.9405472222222215,606,29,101,21,9,216,88,144,0.054000000000000006,0.813,0.133,0.9034,2,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,9,0,10,2,1,4,0,24,31,13,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,4,1,12,5,19,26,2,9,0,1,1,0,4,4,0,6,4,71,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017635519098724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053953335418844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150340078475502,0.0,0.0,0.11723396992747105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28093582027266223,0.0,0.0,0.11867852593873585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578988437263011,0.0,0.1205653550732169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30995029698349136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347676194223038,0.12987934119503514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3599013644596949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15897058742563874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571598200298384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808390916189028,0.0,0.0,0.11569392464096087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879096768572374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20431263784581966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18671597697438816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13151912624833711,0.09551387607951477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22793312672254465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126844534368985,0.0,0.0,0.2071750529253011,0.11073605214979328,0.0,0.0,0.15755448424199964,0.3199282181118205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803360607118447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940804223535112,0.1002997811809538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,an3b3l,2020/03/26,"No one takes my issues seriously WARNING THIS MIGHT NOT MAKE SENSE IM DRUNK. hi I'm a 19 year old girl with a few issues. And I am so fucking close to just saying fuck it and dying. I've had far too many people say ""you are Soo much more fun than usual"" while I was in a manic episode. I fucking hallucinate and somehow no one notices ever. I went non verbal the other day and my dad was just like ""okay"". No concern from anyone ever. And for some unknown reason I can't bring myself to reach out for help in my personal life. I just get drunk to ignore it all. I don't even have a clue why I'm writing this. But fuck living. I don't see the point when I've been cursed since birth to follow this kind of path. If this is my life it's over. I at least wanna try some hard shit before I go out though. Maybe I'll feel something for once.",0.5929484792054609,2.50965637988827,2.4615176908752328,95.12686374922407,82.96648044692738,4.6481688392302924,17.207014276846678,5.46131890053228,-0.6497190564866542,648,13,148,3,18,215,124,179,0.174,0.772,0.055,-0.9616,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,0,11,11,5,0,6,1,12,9,1,2,3,28,27,11,1,2,6,1,2,1,0,1,2,2,0,2,8,9,2,1,2,2,0,4,7,7,0,2,5,5,16,4,18,21,7,22,0,0,1,4,9,9,5,5,10,92,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401479086909607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441218864012045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671302385976071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395441437899471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08880694769743311,0.24324637559920745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798501481905278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4972097771655358,0.07024773250939863,0.0,0.07641446724506984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044620383025607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901230507830567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452355982006264,0.2806743502745697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14001527715533899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189940557693232,0.06568843051493037,0.0,0.11872714849045313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975045214528488,0.13631732294152998,0.1350791663725887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263661271663347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884066162673792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15307909505729514,0.14108899820428158,0.14319129662652055,0.18222178770312425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932148899719024,0.11740182971804475,0.0,0.0,0.12710441978297646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382432048628777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21384968263762275,0.0,0.0,0.10714405744170748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380171949923573,0.11122342742485856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351083010792406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109421037042847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210237865621818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128682663433126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480843345257788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464209804978105,0.1213256646622797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658528277402781
mentalhealth,marinereyes,2020/03/26,"This quarantine has undergone all of the progress I made with improving my mental health these past few months I've been struggling with depression since my freshman year of high school, which became even worse once I started college. After the awful past 3 semesters of college where I had multiple mental breakdowns and suicide attempts, things started improving this semester. I got an apartment off campus with my boyfriend, I started taking new antidepressants along with seeing a therapist who was actually helpful, and I had a job lined up after I graduated. For the first time in years, I felt hope that maybe my depression would go away and I actually looked forward to the future. However, as a result of the pandemic, I got laid off from my job, my school switched to online classes, and my mom made me go stay with my aunt out of state since she thought I'd be safer with her than in my city. As a result, I can't talk to my therapist since she doesn't do teleconference appointments, I'm worried about not having enough money to pay for my meds or rent, and I feel super trapped and isolated since I'm constantly stuck inside the house and don't know when I'll be able to see my boyfriend or any of my friends again. All of this has caused me to lose my motivation to attend or study for my classes, I struggle to get out of bed or do anything productive, and the mental breakdowns and suicidal thoughts have come back with a vengeance. It's just really disheartening that all the improvement I made over several months got completely undone in a matter of days, and I really have no idea how to cope with the fact that I don't know how long this situation will go on.",16.24676100628931,8.341941852201263,13.997547169811325,57.6395911949686,55.00628930817611,17.90691823899371,53.25786163522014,13.5591,6.632827672955978,1351,57,248,30,9,426,179,318,0.14,0.768,0.091,-0.9478,5,2,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,0,6,9,9,0,2,16,1,19,1,0,9,4,51,47,19,2,2,6,2,2,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,12,22,0,0,8,0,3,6,6,6,0,1,14,5,36,3,48,29,5,43,0,4,3,0,9,15,0,5,22,161,48,12,0.09062254438141007,0.0,0.17686906171413952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06162643775881966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07457463248470005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514286355807632,0.06968314283347378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309431620843868,0.0,0.07806329771612097,0.09501601361785003,0.09793077622760177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058444044109965725,0.0,0.1561061293703868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09363731327908163,0.0,0.05985533588234991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04582148134203423,0.0,0.08701185411886762,0.0,0.0,0.07708348995627916,0.0,0.0,0.07001475299013649,0.0,0.04734653913170196,0.0,0.15450864110793044,0.0,0.21743738180637628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963275269762161,0.0,0.0,0.06074238125760802,0.0957476936619028,0.0,0.09000863431459817,0.0,0.10456624900043364,0.0,0.10230182199259837,0.0,0.0,0.17985778402111574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996075608154852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801981000523834,0.07610011340936272,0.10138344681368472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572477279654365,0.0,0.0,0.0910425263289712,0.0,0.10066121741751194,0.0,0.27397863025964314,0.0,0.0,0.10613602871181467,0.1446681006714731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752381806838294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651005216630497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17301894553338096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11611024490720202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1834297060414542,0.14442886986322045,0.0,0.0,0.10237768046927397,0.0,0.2998556207193461,0.10186353682047232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924293100345146,0.09659157459737927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18947671930267104,0.0,0.19825270983825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813687526001794,0.07283896845280692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21043951751763015,0.06020559171744015,0.0,0.0,0.14388835520480578,0.05284273439599735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203159274230788,0.09235211482521896,0.06437565544073381,0.0,0.0,0.11671589480960125
mentalhealth,mars_investigation,2020/03/26,"Is staying in hard for anyone else? Going to work and making my own money was one of the things that contributed heavily to my self esteem. I have social anxiety but confronting it everyday made me feel accomplished. Now with the current situation my parents are encouraging me to quit my job, as I am a store worker. I felt like I was fulfilling a duty to my community during a difficult time. Staying home rather than working makes me feel like a disappointment.",6.3219215686274515,7.912851800000002,7.426764705882353,67.04877450980395,66.29411764705883,10.84313725490196,34.166666666666664,10.864195022040775,4.322019607843138,373,17,59,11,6,126,65,85,0.128,0.715,0.157,0.7003,3,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,5,2,6,1,0,6,0,6,0,0,3,0,11,13,3,0,1,2,1,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,2,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,3,0,1,4,4,12,3,10,9,1,8,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,6,43,15,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15094418495071327,0.0,0.0,0.13796609329993892,0.20217086092353068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16482999862888795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19953513294696645,0.1409607081245603,0.18945177426688065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213773300924217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675401967767354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19792139408733814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195803069843567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19279468792880114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18670267778532448,0.2634164079911468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13370464333923707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21909314252564466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098670525665995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058408732266153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217884905357233,0.0,0.20113612842039985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4206195896413433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13108623287206986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505501049039712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2872929609369738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,boringlife247,2020/03/26,"Someone to make me feel dominate and alive I ALWAYS wanted to meet someone whose has it worse then me. A girl who is shorter (should be 4"" 8) and physically weaker, mentally weaker, and less intelligent,  less talented, worse off in social skills, has no personality, doormat, bullied loser, is sort of ugly and even uglier without makeup, has absolutely zero friends and never has or had any friends or boyfriend or girlfriend, very boring, same age as me, feels no attatchment to family and their family feels no attatchment back to them. 

I want to be 'friends' with them and make them feel special and useless without me and have a fun time with each other and her to have :stockholm syndrome' even if that develops. I dont want them to make even more friends or better friends after being friends with me and then leaving me behind. I dont want this person to get better.. I just them to want me. I want someone to feel superior over and despite not being able to protect that person physically (im also very short and weak girl) i want them to at least know that i have it better than them physically since im taller and weigh more them. 

I know its cowardly and weak to want someone to feel superior over (especially if they are the size of a child) but im also cowardly and weak so who cares? I've come to terms with that and im desperate as fuck right now. I cant believe i have to feel intimidated by people who are only 5""3 or even 4""11 since im similar in height.. I feel weaker than some children and i even feel like a child myself and that im weaker than almost all women and im weaker than all men on earth and mostly all elderly people just because of my damn height. Just because of inches?!

I want to vent my physical anger, sexual frustations on to that person, insult them without remorse or for me to feel any fear from them. I know this is unhealthy and possibly backfire on me and make me feel guilty but i've always wanted to be myself around people without walking on eggshells and worrying about accidentally offending people because im so short and weak (did i mention how pathetically short i am? Since tall people are just soooo super strong automatically apparently, but it does make some sense). 

A lot of people keep saying how weak and frail women are but what about the tall women? What about the tall and fat women? They dont look frail at all unless the tall women is lanky but she at least has height and bigger hands and reach than short women. 

I know tall women are not the average woman but they are still weaker than men, even men who are shorter than them. Men only have to worry about other men being better than them physically most of the time. Men kind of feel like super heroes to me physically and even mentally to me tbh (despite how disgusting that sounds).

I wish i can say the words 'I dont hit women' or 'I cant lose to a woman'. It must be nice to be a man, especially a tall man. I never get the time to be myself around family or any damn thing i never feel alive. I want someone who makes me feel alive without worry but i know that this is unhealthy in the way i describe it.

There is no better feeling than feeling superior to someone and groups of people, especially physically. I feel aroused by thought of it.

What even is our true selves anyway.",4.345377869897959,5.958623570312502,5.39700255102041,79.63223214285716,71.109375,7.911989795918367,26.654974489795922,8.480668928828255,1.8837586096938768,2615,87,487,43,49,862,235,640,0.18600000000000005,0.662,0.152,-0.9894,1,0,0,0,0,0,63.0,1,0,16,12,30,44,7,1,17,0,45,10,3,9,9,132,94,60,0,16,29,0,18,2,7,2,6,3,0,27,30,39,2,2,23,0,0,2,20,17,0,1,3,22,65,27,82,79,18,49,0,3,1,2,66,32,3,17,16,340,95,0,0.04570801773333112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04576997725044897,0.0,0.0,0.07310537053498585,0.0760654646941782,0.0,0.0,0.09324905836013976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813796528903373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03514664424937552,0.0,0.08358955009126898,0.0,0.0,0.05149728368501736,0.0,0.20212513631234624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04660237035882457,0.0,0.0,0.03937341001278168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03999939433933402,0.0,0.21427782547164426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415177170422652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292683536287413,0.0514342275353474,0.392892901350056,0.06530763400317106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21188340670278769,0.04225632586527932,0.04776110547360942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3949800214977648,0.0,0.0,0.04062738631793972,0.0,0.047597866729990834,0.1255996558915314,0.0,0.0,0.04839819106284349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044661257326700184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03838322303756902,0.05113558018546145,0.0,0.03885932214269598,0.0,0.0,0.18306274059343794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212586246938688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575852325757057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952601433672173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22181729024095506,0.15964191217725246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0515289222384672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03903439739989889,0.0,0.07269770057408532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134304338079016,0.0,0.0,0.046593567932728,0.23236953058396526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036502482005291735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030366375968041738,0.0,0.0,0.03628706044513939,0.07995813814334124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542780312172556,0.2965575042432511,0.03628089694361723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052561964633870716,0.22030449000257335,0.0,0.0,0.13925613218453298,0.0931607500309308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pops9000,2020/03/26,"Exams during Coronavirus I'm 17 and currently in my last year of secondary/high school in Ireland. This year has been stressful enough but now Covid-19 has been added. All our schools are closed until April 20th but our final exams that determine our acceptance to college are still scheduled to go ahead. They're due to be started June 3rd. We're the only country in Europe that hasn't cancelled our exams. They can't be held online and our government right now says that they'll still be going ahead as normal.
Most students haven't finished the curriculum yet. We're expected to do it all online. The Irish education system is miles behind. Teachers can't work online teaching. Media is praising teachers and acting like our education is the perfect test ground for online learning. 
The reason I'm making this post I'd because I'm struggling so much. With motivation. With keeping up with all the work. With bad thoughts. I can't help but scroll obsessively through Twitter for any updates. The Government haven't given us any definite updates and keep saying stuff like 'hopefully' and 'maybe'. It's all genuinely killing me. I'm one of the main figures online trying to push for predicted grades and our petition has 3,500 signatures. Campaigning on Twitter for predicated grades is the only thing that makes me happy right now and it's the only way I feel I can make a difference. Teachers are piling on 5 hours + of work and I can't even manage to do an essay or study. 
I'm so disappointed in my Government who are meant to want to keep us safe but are insisting on holding exams. I know some people will think I just don't want to do them, but it's a matter of public safety? I have a parent who's extremely high risk and I don't want to bring the virus home to him. I don't want to have to pick between my family's safety and going to college.
I don't know why I'm really making this post, I just needed a place to vent, thank you all so much for reading and I hope you're all staying safe <3
(Sorry if the formatting is weird, I'm writing this on mobile at midnight while sobbing at my kitchen table!!)",3.9219477351916368,6.010299285365857,4.7502787456446,81.86987804878052,73.21951219512195,7.417421602787456,27.567944250871076,8.238735603445708,2.020774912891985,1697,65,306,28,35,548,210,410,0.08199999999999999,0.7709999999999999,0.147,0.978,2,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,9,1,3,8,13,20,1,4,17,0,37,1,0,7,7,68,72,24,1,10,9,1,1,2,0,2,0,2,2,0,16,16,1,7,11,1,0,6,11,9,0,1,6,3,32,11,46,61,12,53,1,2,0,0,23,18,1,6,26,191,48,23,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13531040377634762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306826336004086,0.060646916833466076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394370869970286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279762330179157,0.0,0.06571083743397599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378836329614633,0.0,0.05030408512565453,0.0,0.0,0.10898416100327636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16962384469688746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105906748170863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668466029522792,0.2102289141025673,0.09979450244487928,0.1976279190455542,0.0979755676939198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652883219069141,0.1100686507680974,0.0,0.10935192559618223,0.08109593891195782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720955152215822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656358550071019,0.0,0.0999489946717618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14627014701934032,0.07376903720008324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747704508914316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674155940449836,0.2269951545482573,0.0,0.0,0.1104695692360752,0.0,0.0,0.06897240182421767,0.0,0.10394370869970286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19056386596182898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09951484976034324,0.0,0.06373451351532829,0.10229015855883268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699242919842011,0.0,0.1582335852706528,0.0,0.20137418688859568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136858898412688,0.07041806673156217,0.10604089280086698,0.1589023738952687,0.0,0.11396308414582786,0.10400638235573212,0.11388987403901528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915951164782528,0.0,0.0,0.06609535794331127,0.06374784642032688,0.0,0.07898230106075868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675457718158404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393434529053466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347222277496704,0.0789688856028285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977237968311101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21728518706752276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281339261861251
mentalhealth,lilshoob,2020/03/26,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me, just knowing something is not right. Not trying to give you my whole life speech but I’ll go over the basics.  Ever since I was 5 yrs old, I have been dealing with panic attacks. Mostly at night with no reason— just waking up dry heaving, shaking, feeling like I’m dying. Because of this, I have an extremely hard time socializing. I don’t like to look into people’s faces when talking to them and when I forcefully trying to.. it actually feels so uncomfortable that I think the other person can tell what I’m doing. I never keep friends or boyfriends. Hanging out with new people literally makes me so anxious and I just would rather be my myself. I get super bad waves of depression where I would self harm. All of which has gotten better thanks to my current boyfriend (minus panic attacks they are still there). He’s the only person I feel comfortable around and this I feel like I’m smothering him bc I literally cant be with out him for more than a couple of hours. If he’s gone more, I get panicked. I feel like I’m a child and Im on top of him 24/7. I’m 22 (female) now  and in 4 yrs into the relationship and nothing has changed dramatically. I tried going to therapy— which I couldn’t afford very well as a college student so I paid $20 an hour at my school for a student to go over things once a week for about 4 months and then I gave up bc I didn’t feel like making any progress. Now, I’m a nurse and I do have an actual income and as soon as I have the money for actual therapy this whole virus thing happens. I tried also every single medication and I’m on lexapro now which I don’t think works but it doesn’t make me go crazy like some of the other ones. I have never actually been diagnosed or gotten to that point with therapy. I wish I did bc I have no clue what to tell people (other than panic attacks bc I feel like that’s obvious). Long story short— are there any online video chat style therapy sessions I can use or any tools online? I’m tired of this feeling.",1.8768341404358324,3.9845513050847465,3.665321428571428,87.17401119854725,79.53268765133173,6.2607506053268756,21.94727602905569,7.365786028017652,0.8162552542372881,1591,48,325,22,40,533,213,413,0.17300000000000001,0.701,0.126,-0.9741,3,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,2,5,22,25,4,4,15,0,30,6,2,4,5,61,71,26,1,6,12,0,9,7,1,2,4,1,0,4,20,21,0,1,12,2,2,7,13,12,1,1,10,11,45,13,46,56,8,46,0,1,1,0,22,18,0,6,28,208,65,6,0.0,0.0,0.28544203797037226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05847890301491794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491847343134759,0.0,0.0,0.08261166049226844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509771845673393,0.0,0.2495744323781503,0.0,0.0,0.061057225723913686,0.04457698212024517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467407883600053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735770077844976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091262114845513,0.0,0.0,0.0753897817255769,0.06298338906095352,0.07422143604397903,0.07589333014992497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614672959300942,0.061611879735191985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957979624097486,0.26120644537171805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056497031159121865,0.0,0.07641072152256788,0.07014920316556048,0.166236955083987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466515464477403,0.0,0.06550660790433914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14402892537160905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898871929984967,0.0,0.0,0.06499782346631837,0.0,0.0,0.08037636679043038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05165111577728502,0.2500799765644781,0.0,0.0,0.06471428326256021,0.06140749334796863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643668685990074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366683645116616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05836854264499534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279868823719585,0.07062562767694633,0.0,0.06862387620744237,0.0,0.07016644989119662,0.0,0.07673352410515928,0.07787689296249245,0.049552127087038086,0.05561568212646132,0.0,0.25739311130046594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520892577944823,0.12770175201918768,0.0,0.0,0.06912778588992301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518579356103318,0.0,0.07851004762337165,0.0,0.06244927624577271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400750109903657,0.0,0.0,0.0762864538963912,0.0,0.0,0.0604906524108045,0.0,0.0,0.07454283372937749,0.0,0.056296032138035274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058398585202975764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058775976412517875,0.12783084128806066,0.06732467341686454,0.25087815042297795,0.0,0.09716344187325124,0.09371248394658546,0.0,0.0,0.04264040768842599,0.08404767636248894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19859124385834304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315745783093864,0.0,0.06033667774480104,0.0,0.0,0.058657333747436674,0.0,0.0657491316729231,0.0,0.0,0.16328532277307278,0.08409138780376381,0.0,0.0,0.05323666013393678,0.0,0.0,0.1038933440738242,0.07995189341083506,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yellowfellow324,2020/03/26,"Is online schooling affecting your grades too? In school, I get great grades. But now, I'm falling behind. In maths, I've gotten under 70% for every day. I feel like a failure and a disappointment.",1.8737837837837856,4.673808270270271,3.2419459459459468,84.99967567567569,87.91891891891892,5.122162162162162,20.913513513513514,6.742157984588678,0.7747124324324326,154,5,27,2,5,50,31,37,0.201,0.637,0.162,-0.1531,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,5,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,2,5,4,0,6,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,15,3,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321710722765696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033166428047062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18202748660691806,0.25718501831018203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880858336584103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3969027314178808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758784628878978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7286811203360676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NihilisticBuddhism,2020/03/26,"Seeking love/friendship by harming myself Idk why (maybe I’m just toxic or maybe because of my fucked up childhood) but whenever I think about how lonely I am, I think that if I somehow injure myself, then people will care enough to want to be in my life. 

I’ve never done something like that before obviously, but I just wish I knew why I’m like this.

Like for example I really like this person and want to be good friends with them, but I feel like they’re not really interested (or maybe they are it’s hard to tell when your anxiety is on overdrive 24/7). So then I get a thought in my head saying if I were to be hospitalised, they would be concerned and caring towards me, and a good friendship would blossom from there on.


(Lmao I realise how stupid it sounds when I type it out but it is what it is.)",4.33752525252525,5.165156512345682,5.0128956228956225,85.35348484848488,70.29629629629629,7.8662177328844,27.690235690235692,8.00094639256281,1.600177777777778,633,21,130,8,11,204,100,162,0.17,0.645,0.18600000000000005,0.79,0,2,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,3,0,10,15,2,0,2,0,14,4,1,2,2,31,28,18,0,7,11,0,2,5,1,3,2,2,0,1,10,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,4,4,22,11,18,17,1,13,0,1,0,1,8,7,1,5,11,91,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113393757750717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872116718728564,0.0,0.12384568265701205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2967799219458374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14894018992252428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15038398651753224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359050351878497,0.10397536848819468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244553374054583,0.13455140795902398,0.07603978641732673,0.0,0.0,0.24414776488924306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303772134254313,0.0,0.14936827424164392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280075187515066,0.35552280821138443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135750739577515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4386500714038543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225110810107616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090062798012367,0.12708182510473331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864761054455928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574098986755425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204548719396264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721028771100473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18651511520751424,0.0,0.115544240385544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716891071967827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626583748201592,0.0,0.16736633395736858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067779896888464,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sketchbox20,2020/03/26,"Does psychosis change you forever? If you've never experienced psychosis, it's really not something you can imagine happening to you. You can't even really imagine it happening to you while it's actively happening to you and it's still unbelievable how quickly you can lose your mind and so much more. I was dismissed from dental school and almost ruined my marriage. After I got a grip on reality I was catatonic for months just realizing how much my own brain had taken from me. I have a job now and am doing well. For a while happiness for me was just being grateful that I wasn't SO sad and empty anymore but I still felt like a stranger in my life and in my head. Now I actually feel like myself again I actually feel real joy again. I'm not bitter anymore, I don't have any regrets, I don't even wish it wouldn't have happened because I learned a lot about my own strength and I'm honestly proud of me. But, I just feel like a part of my soul died or something. Like there's some part of me I'll never get back. I act really erratically sometimes trying to be the me that I was before everything. I used to be the life of the party type but now I'm not very good at socializing like I try way to hard to be as extroverted as I used to be and it seems off putting to people or I'll be really awkward and spacey and forget what I'm talking about. I'm actually genuinely happy, enjoying, and living life again but I still don't feel like the same person even though I try to be. My brain feels a little foggier and less functional especially in social situations, and there's this chunk of time when things were really bad that has no relevance because the memories I do have don't feel like mine, like I can't relate to that person. I'm just wondering if I'll ever feel completely like myself again as time goes on, and if I'll regain my full mental capacity or if having a psychotic break just kind of reshapes your brain permanently and changes you a little bit forever and this is just who I am now",4.171795657726694,5.324159780246916,5.793835674755218,78.39777777777778,70.95061728395059,9.33929331630481,28.286504895700297,9.668497473035632,2.5816147296722014,1601,58,316,38,29,547,186,405,0.07400000000000001,0.745,0.182,0.9931,1,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,10,0,3,34,26,1,1,14,0,34,7,4,4,3,67,60,38,1,7,20,0,10,9,0,1,3,0,0,2,15,16,0,0,14,0,0,2,14,7,1,0,10,12,48,19,35,42,13,37,1,4,0,0,17,10,0,12,32,225,63,4,0.0,0.0,0.2199449524340575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523075661935844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051090238885121375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490153930574809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05776949866161463,0.06272950638520693,0.09159577925106996,0.0,0.06392917366553412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202131761156753,0.0,0.0,0.25160614928568403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15895286192232336,0.0,0.07877123861427747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797195306189189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574582032230883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886582057912892,0.06795840536757478,0.0,0.0,0.06752102499664764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659120596743785,0.2146884492511084,0.07213554075878853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0392517575669253,0.0,0.0,0.06301456993411263,0.06008745695864519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265745007775616,0.15995225533549384,0.06730075155050942,0.0,0.07710394209349149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455385614652286,0.0,0.0,0.07823520444353015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591973247329479,0.3303377392659623,0.15059782100167168,0.06634020889622452,0.0,0.0,0.08405003931882885,0.0,0.06387191740371098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571227641056938,0.0,0.0758587879049071,0.0,0.0599671836565352,0.0,0.11045679481279036,0.0,0.11588810251571632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627145886607461,0.0,0.05208493046113912,0.13119934248097165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552531091904137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551315376032012,0.2406475355810229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760344735238594,0.0,0.06839454311326068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444804890732932,0.0,0.15316893648402324,0.0,0.11567581938403007,0.07430441856518748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17999414712724218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06038577652279022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049912313203985134,0.0,0.07381377812208095,0.0,0.08761654970875388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15302280629308462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977452241914125,0.0,0.061989223502702924,0.0,0.059633836236405814,0.0,0.0,0.06754991774025318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863945452095951,0.0,0.08147410417816994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jigglypuff2cute,2020/03/27,"I keep doing things wrong when I know how to do it I dont know if this the right place to ask or even how to ask but i just need some answers. I have a bad habit of doing things wrong when I know exactly how to do it right. For example If im printing something I know im supposed to save and then hit print. Instead I might turn the computer off and not realise i did that until its too late. 
Or maybe I'll put food to defrost in the microwave and instead I'll put the frozen food in the fridge and then walk away thinking that its in the microwave. Or maybe ill push on my front door to open it and for the 17th time within these past few months I tried to push it open even though I've lived here my whole life and know that im supposed to pull it! 
This do one thing end up doing another happens A LOT. I don't know why I cant stop doing this. I'm only 26 and this has been going on for years whats wrong with me!?",0.7982977558839649,2.2855133645320187,2.294047619047621,98.70234126984128,80.3793103448276,5.29928845101259,19.65216201423098,5.82211442006289,-0.38920777230432346,715,17,178,4,18,232,111,203,0.098,0.868,0.034,-0.9294,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,15,5,0,0,9,0,15,4,0,3,1,37,31,22,0,3,8,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,19,10,2,2,8,0,0,8,4,4,0,1,2,0,15,1,24,27,4,34,0,0,0,0,2,14,0,8,12,116,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674240551814033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20816273737989507,0.0,0.10460106111087708,0.0,0.09295844261152916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130481500165581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860803291801826,0.0,0.0,0.14706885309703369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692487210954862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632731354310362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845144445627092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607763819729577,0.0,0.0,0.09895792628851148,0.0,0.0,0.3671143811903537,0.0,0.12558852465478326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863782254888264,0.0,0.0,0.09830911889609316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465137398022602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22369801677458429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810676746458765,0.0,0.0,0.08886497474218356,0.0,0.0,0.08255204254541339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544215295546143,0.08467379796505951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062799895303732,0.0,0.0,0.1163193365209902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238409222503064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19015562509419856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570961766955486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307941120522724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22189418520638093,0.0713377201276983,0.1093841519390584,0.0,0.06491919415009216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558782980426032,0.1210983834196778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004607568200012,0.12429936937308952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3651756237134424,0.0,0.07169483110737902
mentalhealth,William444555,2020/03/27,"Relationship advice Hi, I don't really know where to start with tis post, or why I'm even making it.
Quick overview though, I'm 19 and at uni, Hannah, my girlfriend, is 18 and would have finished her a levels this year. I have been her for around 10 months. Yep not very long, but man I love her, I'd do anything for her and she means to world to me, sorry, sob stories and all.
Anyway things have been getting really hard between me and her, probably becuase of this virus outbreak

My parents have never really been there for me, I always used to get told off, and going to university was the happiest time in my life, I could be away from parents, do what I want and not get told off.

I confide in my girlfriend a lot, she's called Hannah by the way, she has helped me through very hard times with parents and basically life but recently we've drifted away.

We've just had a serious conversation about keeping this relationship going after a tiny argument, I can't even remember what exactly about. Basically our conversations have dried up and I feel pushed away from her. 

There's nothing to talk about now that there's a lockdown (I'm in UK), so I can't drive and see her to talk through our issues, plus I don't really have any friends close enough to talk to about this aswell.
I feel empty and alone, and the thought of her leaving, I just can't handle.

We don't want to break up at all, and I want to turn this around, and hopefully stay with her, especially through this challenging time, she's all I have really 

Hannah has such an amazing personality and is absolutely beautiful. I want to make us work, and I really just need some help on how to make that happen. All we ever talk about is how our day has been, which is litterally the same every day now, and that's it.
I need to try my best to not loose this amazing girl, so yeah, any help would be greatly appreciated, even if it's just a simple comment saying everything will be okay.

I over think a lot and this is probably just me bearing myself up. It just feels I'm in a box and whenever I try to teach out so get pushed further and further inside. 
In past relationships I've been controlling and selfish, becuase that's all I've ever had in my life, but with Hannah I've tried my best to not be, becuase it's just not fair on her at all.

I don't think it's fully sunk in that I might end up loosing her, looking back I can see how we've drifted away slightly and that hurts me so much.

I want to keep our relationship alive and thriving but my mind is blank. I don't know what to do or say, or feel. I've rewritten this whole post 10 times, so sorry if it's all over the place. So yeah, I'm just blabbering on now, thinking of things to say and reasons why I shouldn't post this",4.323696272300921,4.960821760286226,5.268530677367887,84.19901803413433,70.21645796064401,8.547715515157376,27.809360344244066,8.685302888712808,1.8190899869458008,2160,71,460,35,37,709,230,559,0.051,0.799,0.15,0.9962,3,2,0,0,0,0,63.0,7,0,0,5,43,14,0,0,14,4,46,4,0,9,11,109,91,44,0,14,22,3,6,0,3,5,3,3,0,3,29,35,0,3,13,0,0,7,15,4,0,0,11,12,63,10,72,70,16,71,0,2,3,1,53,35,1,10,23,313,92,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519780657665843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691015807771021,0.0,0.0,0.0555162100692171,0.0,0.0,0.09074349020266878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05490470225398127,0.11878951698735155,0.0,0.0,0.25074175584662073,0.05130340012307088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003660658734854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681283652830667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748319177546165,0.05327032325543291,0.0,0.0,0.08605748988530525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059093930434024534,0.06893937836710777,0.0,0.13220337608529406,0.12070373962290125,0.05621430065395145,0.0,0.059963445111643386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494212206473288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05154754422823556,0.0,0.13943334601432464,0.0,0.0758367884006546,0.0,0.0,0.07355880398776822,0.0,0.0,0.059000089928424336,0.0,0.11953565342859306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13416260648006578,0.0,0.0,0.06626780585669513,0.0,0.0,0.07142491509857203,0.0,0.0,0.06963812638711114,0.0,0.11860722983593923,0.0,0.0,0.07333490339280674,0.0,0.0,0.07064662400519246,0.0,0.0,0.14137848239150014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059044914577547465,0.05602781976957767,0.0,0.0,0.11344555902707334,0.060217215365957616,0.0,0.1336079336857024,0.0,0.0,0.07267741085823604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07077915352132065,0.06736796819949839,0.0,0.053255099813236215,0.0,0.0490467225082384,0.09894375772450677,0.05145841517244941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401943792263774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222532930336086,0.0,0.06369158903167937,0.0,0.05825714710293605,0.06970797993930238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916973472247444,0.0,0.1438704364038498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256454435490836,0.06859905625849147,0.06587774346378343,0.28652834099040697,0.07558051579467498,0.0,0.0,0.1591747647705698,0.0,0.0,0.10633406873773103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14937468489222994,0.04722461074839659,0.07111441876163957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21450735952116085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865132759317297,0.1282540421646869,0.06555185489447439,0.0529680605664116,0.15561938432046266,0.0,0.0,0.12750723706768166,0.0,0.13589507337071066,0.07257197242160633,0.0,0.0,0.08025569234753,0.057624476615663535,0.0,0.1101016283802644,0.19676530388376884,0.05295906373068223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040846570393013,0.07449026280478907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048572801729858284,0.0,0.0,0.0947916490263236,0.0,0.0,0.04296535724894715
mentalhealth,uselessballsweat,2020/03/27,"I just realized I’ve been sad my whole life 
So ever since I was little, I’ve been.. sad. Looking back I remember the distinct feeling of emptiness, not knowing whether I actually existed at all. Being 11 years old, not being able to sleep having to turn on the radio in the middle of the night to get the feeling I wasn’t the only person alive on this planet. 

I’m 30 now, still struggling. I have no real friends. I know now that it’s always been me, the common denominator. Even as a little girl all my friends always chose someone else. I was always the one ringing their doorbells, and it was tonight that truth hit me. 

Waves of soulcrushing depression and loneliness crash over me at times, makes me question if there was ever a purpose to me being put on this earth.

For the sake of my 9 year old, amazing, beautiful girl I hope I manage to hang on. 

Although I don’t believe in any God, please pray for me.",3.279166666666669,5.089664138888889,4.495555555555555,84.205,74.27777777777777,6.8000000000000025,27.555555555555557,7.554174236665415,1.6276222222222219,715,28,137,9,15,235,112,180,0.12,0.7190000000000001,0.161,0.7269,0,0,0,0,1,0,23.0,0,0,1,0,10,9,0,1,11,0,14,2,1,1,6,23,25,7,0,2,5,0,2,0,2,0,1,1,0,3,6,2,0,0,7,1,0,2,5,4,0,1,8,4,21,5,21,13,3,28,1,3,1,0,7,12,0,3,14,95,27,1,0.14300603995229855,0.0,0.13955326612417632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3569774436459591,0.0,0.0,0.09724901105362757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996281748727504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16111883589132714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317089266211168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946319624589614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944541406664088,0.25871430077430463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446163013012169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209722234506517,0.0,0.07471475351844327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420372650393793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571847592534859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10100939520935268,0.0,0.2866592421338021,0.0,0.0,0.12008905656842518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545764212825836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420148100040905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001215654494361,0.0,0.09690459369708113,0.108762537482685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248673580862468,0.0,0.1569776879598042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376056868533202,0.1601994932163121,0.0,0.0,0.16277218147221767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199796590453494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829607403218242,0.0,0.14310931720408265,0.0,0.12116855357944235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420480823433818,0.0,0.0,0.1495009628982932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338797192029486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555495062499764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15966113656663178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18418240218417486
mentalhealth,Elevenseses,2020/03/27,"I pay 260 a month to Kaiser for 2 $50 sessions and apparently nothing else until I hit the 7K mark I signed up for healthcare at the start of the year last minute without looking too closely at the cost/benefit. I know that's super dumb, but I just wasn't getting a whole lot done at the time. I've been reasonably impaired by depression for quite some time now, and it's taken me till now to actually get around to seeking out therapy again. Somehow I thought it'd be a smallish copay for a useful number of sessions, not this. It feels like half the reason I bought this fucking insurance was a fucking fantasy. Fuck.

I'm making progress, sort of. I might take the two sessions eventually, but for now I'm too disappointed and annoyed with KP to want anything to do with them. This makes it maybe the 5th most disappointing thing KP has done for me, I really need to switch next year.",7.214539141414143,6.2390223352272765,7.457121212121212,76.42929292929294,64.2840909090909,10.549494949494953,36.6010101010101,9.725611199111238,3.342245707070707,705,30,139,12,9,230,117,176,0.14400000000000002,0.767,0.09,-0.9137,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,3,9,10,5,0,13,0,10,3,0,5,0,30,31,7,0,2,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,0,5,1,2,0,3,8,0,2,8,2,12,2,27,19,4,21,0,3,1,3,1,7,4,6,15,90,21,4,0.0,0.0,0.1473709135265286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242742128969726,0.13443724415192698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007081436088844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090858682627283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126155416154081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635878767116827,0.1078866525678125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4188386503665068,0.15780041249804733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829950534551504,0.12309909950462793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737793310995375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681633660426264,0.0,0.0,0.12838934531991095,0.0,0.0,0.2016101853325636,0.0,0.15171698368082556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16020528720266924,0.0,0.0,0.12054041530768413,0.0,0.0,0.11197727250574616,0.0,0.0,0.16060840826172898,0.0,0.0,0.14490498866817006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160625284073318,0.0,0.0,0.09674542679159466,0.3105414790362877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689068675711356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354607136595925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17270122497054982,0.0,0.10032905658926844,0.0,0.0,0.11989071546404127,0.17611858095938066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14752177147083145,0.0,0.0,0.13043029432861214,0.0,0.0,0.08907380337834678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860520863461262,0.0,0.14557510364489815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945001333128244
mentalhealth,FAway1446,2020/03/27,"This is a throw away account, sorry. I have been upset with myself for about 2 and a half years, I don't get happy for anything and always want to cry but I can't. I want to feel good again but don't know how. I really really struggle with talking to people face to face about my mental health. Just asking for some advice on what to do.",1.9335680751173712,3.4791556197183127,3.6503521126760567,89.96782863849769,77.30985915492958,5.860093896713615,17.467136150234744,6.42735559955562,-0.19984694835680766,263,4,56,2,6,88,49,71,0.156,0.7509999999999999,0.09300000000000001,-0.5197,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,2,0,7,3,2,1,0,13,13,5,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,1,1,3,2,0,1,1,1,7,2,14,12,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,41,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368561184849269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20168399399338385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19946245656528555,0.0,0.22659754410468655,0.0,0.2277289764422383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662488801657153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255729498657153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12663631975673798,0.0,0.0,0.20330129711780712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580236683407154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576442487930037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320862678611875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442673816246757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680394539566333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105564708795441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713305088100096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533937522373687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19482012981101776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28593027021925466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15608819194459195
mentalhealth,ghostgirlx1,2020/03/27,"Feeling nothing The past few months have been a haze, i have just been living this routine life, work, home, small talk with people I encounter daily.
I haven’t had a meaningful conversation in a long time
I used to be a person with a lot of depth. 
I used to be filled with grand emotions whether it was through music, the way the sun reflected through the trees, driving down A1A looking at the ocean, filming things, writing, reading, everything I did held a purpose, everything around me gave me intense emotions
Let me preface this, in highschool I went out a lot, I had a few friends, I did normal teenager things until I turned 18 and my depression, anxiety, and eating disorder became unbearable, and I began to isolate, the few friends I had really hurt me so I left them and I just became a lot more closed off. 
Last year I went on anti depressants and anti anxiety meds for about 3 months and I hated it, I went crazy, I talked nonsense, after that I went out a lot being wild, toward the end of last year I cut off all my friends, and I’ve been isolating since, I work and come home to my parents (I’m really close to my family by the way)
But I feel like my life has nothing really, I have the entire world right infront of me and all I do is the same thing every single day. 
I don’t think I’m depressed or anxious I just feel like I’m in a bubble, I haven’t had any interaction with anyone my age in months I feel so isolated, I love my own company don’t get me wrong but I think it’s only human to want some sort of connection with people who aren’t your family. 
Everything used to hold so much emotion and now I don’t even know what feeling is really like
When I was depressed nothing felt real but now I feel nothing",4.9130564263322904,5.341256063218392,5.837711598746082,81.38299373040752,68.82758620689654,8.970950888192267,30.47335423197493,8.97023862654752,2.402989655172416,1362,51,271,23,22,450,177,348,0.111,0.812,0.077,-0.8273,2,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,1,2,12,16,2,0,21,0,28,4,0,3,2,59,58,20,0,2,8,1,7,3,3,0,2,0,2,2,11,21,1,2,12,2,0,7,6,8,0,0,19,8,48,8,36,35,15,48,0,5,1,1,16,20,0,7,22,184,59,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05219674622575173,0.0,0.11743633665333672,0.08671248900592209,0.0,0.05366961497989371,0.0,0.0,0.06832915792218514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611854081814955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049501302521383135,0.0,0.264439494326096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796908338283042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854060154255511,0.0,0.25902067624196395,0.06798307809095687,0.0,0.0,0.0506966472658242,0.0,0.06467028277045746,0.0,0.20695016603332228,0.0,0.14471754606509524,0.0,0.2328609915106656,0.10966907522548043,0.07369784516588701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779046019917885,0.0,0.040101868250065884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578070873669236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398515335007973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216893926538395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04218311785600435,0.12513285084340128,0.0,0.0,0.0833956731476631,0.0784882617300093,0.10843013643093648,0.11249738711683988,0.0,0.06777699857903809,0.06792668907140609,0.06445575067838404,0.0,0.0,0.2610209962940365,0.0692753320785514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525866837995415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18379784096711874,0.0,0.056424528574989564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520463236166247,0.2945980012274125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837643495132235,0.0,0.0,0.08522851030160708,0.0,0.07327233506175336,0.10642596146708333,0.06702042243199521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677682149585638,0.08736518918667634,0.19668756488407435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554924749873725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349339791594967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123387211396381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529799274401529,0.09836435541319803,0.0,0.0,0.044757070138261135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348854158315001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988777492852768,0.0,0.0,0.04527270709960833,0.12185075992691033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846145101543521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175863743854994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392069154739394,0.0,0.09885675958961958
mentalhealth,The-Bored-Chicken,2020/03/27,"Quarantine has ruined everything I've worked for... I don't know how to cope anymore. Before the virus I finally felt like I met my stride. As a 16 year old (Junior) holding a job and working on graduating high school with some of my college major. I felt like everything was going right, I finally was making friends and hanging out with people outside of school. When this virus started I though not much of it. When it entered the U.S Everything went to hell. My job was stopped ( it's been 2-3 ish weeks now) and school went online. I went from top of the class to drowning in work and having heavy grade drops, not adding being called overweight and lazy now that I've been stuck at home. I feel like I'm falling apart not knowing when this will end. Is their anything that I can do mentally to get through something that feels like hell? This virus dosent scare me because of how it can kill me, but how it can ruin everything people have given their all to work for.",5.584047619047617,6.213366412698412,5.286891534391536,85.21065476190476,67.41269841269842,8.204761904761906,30.035714285714285,8.07648339933343,1.9028444444444448,768,27,152,9,12,236,117,189,0.134,0.812,0.055,-0.9337,2,1,1,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,2,5,9,11,3,1,5,0,16,1,0,4,1,26,33,14,2,0,4,0,4,4,1,1,1,0,1,0,11,8,1,2,6,0,0,7,4,6,0,0,13,4,16,5,21,18,4,29,2,2,0,0,5,8,2,1,17,90,27,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188369959971553,0.0,0.0,0.09283840532784073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687719197329869,0.0,0.09599857189644324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151983078100365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992197463654176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40556895082514055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140868715223404,0.16119232698513436,0.21664315362658187,0.24717002492526835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716178411419608,0.0,0.0589419893109259,0.0,0.06411624333862162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11919687562943555,0.11316419482260374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22390602940946885,0.0,0.12481479374339274,0.0,0.12400204729943233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22046586450285816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07530592094613696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369254432209157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293314265066952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838198795859185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15642557708486646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963447144486457,0.0,0.0,0.1129490442359662,0.34252910469529263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685168935481356,0.0,0.0,0.07985213240622269,0.0,0.0,0.0943196846180417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084168431573133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049462876038122,0.0,0.0,0.3137462071089047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32852715849695274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265015722845478
mentalhealth,Dcua,2020/03/27,"I feel like I have two options I either die or kill my ego. The latter has already started and is a work in progress. It's not intentional, but I think it's happening as a way to cope with my life. If the origin of hurt is emotion, then the mind will slowly try to wipe emotions away completely. That's my hypothesis. Six years ago I was an energic guy full of life and was very expressive. At this point I'm the complete opposite. For every year that passes I become less and less invested in anything, I don't care about anything regarding myself or my life, I only ever care about others at this point. In my mind I myself have almost been erased from existence, already I feel like I'm just controlling a lifeless husk from a third perspective. Which leads me to believe I've almost completely eliminated my ego, all I have left is empathy. That is the one emotion I can't seem to get rid of, and I wish I could, because I feel like it's holding me back. Life would be so easy as a psychopath. I wouldn't have to worry about others opinions, loneliness wouldn't be so excruciating, and I could basically snake my way into getting anything that would bring me a false sense of joy.",6.470384615384614,6.150244927350433,7.1129059829059855,76.12653846153846,65.53846153846153,10.276923076923078,33.811965811965806,9.851270322608157,3.1445145299145287,939,37,181,18,13,311,132,234,0.11699999999999999,0.77,0.113,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,4,8,9,1,0,12,0,23,4,0,4,2,39,38,14,2,8,7,0,3,3,0,5,4,0,0,1,12,7,0,2,5,0,1,3,5,2,0,4,3,3,29,7,25,26,5,24,0,1,0,0,2,11,0,8,11,126,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001022662689727,0.0,0.20335786795794134,0.0,0.2241066762332775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506794885184512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954013841642186,0.07807898397370444,0.0,0.061898627700531415,0.11214437672820794,0.0,0.11440226153605615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20705622434767465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193923308931025,0.0,0.11388719057739008,0.16214491459658986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10538382735807073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3426608513283659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09184990984003596,0.0855529159728947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15402698106940718,0.21762335285187648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610226576344103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054184105567568,0.08979262709523557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870205070086096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234039240779148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032490831421396,0.0,0.2868864632595389,0.1488238352279765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050555127641242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880700577836962,0.07722672640715758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919786795355566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924393764763176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187144744682039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506355835231918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893987032934552,0.0,0.0991910854649094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378219822817913,0.0,0.16119749873774336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676747188594913,0.0,0.0,0.07392326821859227,0.10312010857451356,0.0,0.144264037615687,0.0,0.0,0.13077852274966248
mentalhealth,webdevlets,2020/03/27,"I feel like I have ADD of the highest order, along with depression and anxiety for many years Is there any way for me to make money?  I had a nice job before, but now we're in corona stay-in-house mode.  I don't know what remote job I could do.  Sometimes I fantasize about some mystic time in the past when we were cave-people, hunting and gathering.  I think most people with severe focus issues could do these tasks, since they're so primal in nature.

​

Anyway, hope you all are doing well today.",4.576580086580087,5.745354969696972,5.0630880230880235,83.9527272727273,70.01010101010101,7.273304473304473,22.223665223665233,7.447530270364453,0.8423119769119771,398,8,75,4,7,127,79,99,0.078,0.816,0.106,0.3928,2,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,3,0,11,0,0,1,1,18,16,5,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,2,1,10,4,11,12,3,11,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,3,7,49,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19872295222713052,0.22286131183892746,0.12472401857313435,0.0,0.14030694337308458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15606706129431058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29287340710693016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15796940799312847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273681065776836,0.13102701570862424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18216594997639235,0.0,0.21162869795417608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19143074504861585,0.3640091235285135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079647402138868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960409230302713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224265481032714,0.1859473562026748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750840950815883,0.25430461771073765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20719931549989207,0.0,0.15171734473045245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18139562240115711,0.0,0.0,0.1954889781434378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175207132493383,0.0,0.0,0.10694692774641744,0.0,0.17384974183670215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558107107427867,0.0,0.0,0.16490620084578647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22286131183892746,0.1181090126366207
mentalhealth,C667,2020/03/27,"Don't know what to title this About a month ago i was severely depressed and had anxiety and suicidal thoughts, but then one day that all suddenly just dissapeared over about 3 to 4 hours, and i am still positive to this day even though i am fully aware of some big problems that await me in the near future. I have been diagnosed with ADHD, but i am not on any meds and never have been. I had been depressed for around a month or so, ive been depressed before but never so severely. Any idea what may have caused that sudden uplift?",7.921132075471696,6.212032999999997,7.817622641509434,76.77360377358492,63.339622641509436,11.498867924528305,33.46415094339623,10.355215969177356,3.098507924528302,422,13,85,8,5,136,71,106,0.214,0.7290000000000001,0.055999999999999994,-0.9531,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,3,0,16,1,0,1,3,22,18,12,1,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,8,0,8,0,13,9,2,19,0,3,0,0,0,6,0,3,13,67,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20125063574320093,0.0,0.14844042609350375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277528502944393,0.0,0.12810405980698453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907213188816354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249347661137884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202435053654658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21599167683310813,0.0,0.43269111284283773,0.16996521483668686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060369419604532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16491130156103015,0.0,0.0,0.1890384419128146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920299254330856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860068504256971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673249783117267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583061484848043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347312009663628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602336248141493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3783572340277531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373128585522068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317065445582995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16452554074082718,0.13294206274880466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,charlieinman,2020/03/27,Mental fitness app Mindshine lifts paywall during lockdown. Over a years worth of mental fitness exercises for free during lockdown https://youtu.be/_Tcz6AvcB_A,14.995714285714278,20.300373571428565,8.733571428571429,51.14892857142861,51.38095238095239,8.009523809523811,48.5952380952381,8.841846274778883,6.262980952380952,139,8,9,2,2,36,17,21,0.0,0.63,0.37,0.8126,0,2,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9525615473959672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043460175895203
mentalhealth,greenleafenergy,2020/03/27,"Death anxiety after discovering a dead body Content warning: death, illness, graphic description

I experienced an unexpected discovery of a dead body a month ago. It was my flatmate. It looked terrifying; dried blood on his bedsheets, dried blood in his lifeless eyes, and dried blood on his mouth. That day, I heard him in his room making abnormal noises. I thought: he probably drank again and he is hungover. The toilet was covered in dried vomit so he's been there during the night. He had a few situations like this after he drank so I thought he's just going through it. When I was leaving for my classes I didn't hear anything more, that ""moaning"" lasted a few seconds so yeah. If it lasted longer I probably would suspect something. So when I came back I went to the kitchen to make dinner. After I ate I saw the toilet was in the same state as before so I sent the pics of it to my landlord, because he always required photos if something was unclean or damaged. Then my landlord said he's calling his mom. Then his mom called my landlord back to say that he's not answering his phone and that I should knock on the door to see if he really is there. I thought ""maybe he's not there because if he was I probably would've heard his phone ringing"". But I still knocked to ask if everything's ok, not walking in. I didn't hear anything so I assumed he's not here. I told my landlord that he probably still has his classes (but at the same time I remembered he was really hungover that morning so it would be weird if he left). He said ok, and no one called me for next 30 minutes. Then I get another call from my landlord who tells me this guy has diabetes and that I should check on him! And I didn't know he was ill before! I said I okay and without hesitation walked into his bedroom after that because I thought he may have lost consciousness, or worse, fell into a coma. Then I  saw him lying on his bed, I called his name because he looked like he was sleeping. And then I walked up to him and yeah... He looked terrible. I walked out to call 911 and to catch a breath. I fell on the floor because it was a horrifying thing to see. I still don't know what happened to him, probably he drank alcohol which is bad for diabetics (because it contains sugar and then his sugar levels went up and fucked his body up). So yeah. 
And after that I've been having nightmares and flashbacks about this event, but a month after it's not that intense. A fear that I've been having is a fear of death; yes, I know death is not avoidable, and a normal process. Everyone dies. But that's not where I'm going. I'm scared of premature death. I'm scared I'll die alone, painfully and slowly like this guy. I'm scared I won't even be able to tell anyone goodbye, I'm scared of the process of dying. And also of finding a dead body again. Also; I started being really cautious about sugary drinks and foods. I know that is not how one gets diabetes, other factors are vital, but mostly it's inheritable. Still, I can't go through a day without thinking about this event. I can't go to bed without thinking I may die in my sleep. This shit fucks me up. I've been reading more about diabetes and death recently. I know you can live with diabetes all your life if you're cautious. This guy wasn't because he didn't eat healthy foods, drank alcohol etc. But still. The eyes and his fair skin were the creepiest. The light in his room was on but there was no light in his eyes. They were covered with mucus and had dark brown spots which are called, from what I've read, ""tache noire"". It appears a few hours after death when sclera is exposed to air. It creeped me out and I still remember this view in details. 
Yes, I know I shouldn't be reading about death and that I'm literally rubbing salt into my own wound. But I want to get prepared in case, I don't know. It's sick. Even now when I'm writing this I feel like puking. I just had to let this out. It's been messing with my mind and I don't want to tell my friends/ family that I'm reading about death lol. I don't know what I can do because I can't see my psychiatrist right now (coronavirus) and I don't even have money. I only called him so he could prescribe me some meds, I told him about this situation, he was shocked but it wasn't the same as having an appointment. I still had to pay for it so yeah. I'm stupid as hell for doing all this to myself. But it's not easy to forget. I can't stop worrying.",2.5778840861944907,4.476971608695653,3.6507139127612436,89.11225985352019,76.50278706800445,6.503868027038088,25.73570128275687,7.392516173487457,1.1948988865839718,3491,129,725,44,79,1126,325,897,0.175,0.758,0.068,-0.9987,0,3,5,0,0,0,110.0,0,2,1,2,48,29,5,7,31,10,73,46,16,3,2,120,141,70,16,16,33,2,3,4,1,8,15,9,12,3,52,35,15,4,22,5,4,16,31,20,0,3,53,31,101,9,87,74,14,99,1,2,13,2,87,36,4,15,50,463,153,8,0.047970558351018204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042523005600310665,0.10253187619774208,0.0,0.04968303128820696,0.0,0.07672407636404778,0.039915347389354684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050301313061076325,0.03669734583733676,0.0,0.0,0.03354212977006905,0.0,0.07895136433284458,0.0,0.04484599650882504,0.0,0.0,0.07377279665215856,0.04005341249153927,0.2339392569932449,0.0,0.08163882391629124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21313790455885015,0.0,0.0,0.3918664280507586,0.054865539251004236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03830058744342901,0.0,0.0,0.06187408326225963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1991434639756949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046992884601697885,0.0,0.049085857056112736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05349985300581217,0.09505230410921013,0.0,0.0,0.0458379242375135,0.04311284468643665,0.0,0.04522237314297746,0.10796042950795956,0.02425535565628027,0.034270176470938184,0.0,0.0,0.04384422127289117,0.0,0.11601237914370345,0.0,0.037061934385881665,0.08869601641647447,0.07518791047987795,0.0,0.10905109517133864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249518406384493,0.04242020632460357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813261131116776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047241337042625856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21090691464990527,0.07820481520242822,0.0,0.05079389489189867,0.052120152008340685,0.04905314601868103,0.033883024021276166,0.09374396689524406,0.0,0.04235888188531931,0.0,0.12084956196303175,0.0,0.052365531130172414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640414403935899,0.0,0.04819287354487397,0.0,0.053284476139712544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04843658906552405,0.11236507633325464,0.07657928401992074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05101723302042699,0.045017119397688134,0.047000962070069485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06501218365291604,0.036483771262096856,0.05104405626132345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25860187686433633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919341594615287,0.0,0.0921935041080329,0.0,0.047365139160350234,0.0,0.10868258262045308,0.040966594725091766,0.13689295841744129,0.03814811339795831,0.19210758976374054,0.0,0.1146789727099046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049241088791873465,0.0,0.10784183494830113,0.09601040422911836,0.0,0.0,0.07386015889610077,0.0,0.0,0.03395380810395951,0.0,0.2681654490565365,0.04010553476086514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578514716021216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03186950741951903,0.061475193650163525,0.0,0.15233305986937395,0.02797201834349009,0.0,0.0,0.091675848475027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05658855637948147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893837637570494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387257192510444,0.0,0.0,0.048716430551774034,0.04888609719914119,0.1022307249300181,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LukaZarius,2020/03/27,"2 months into being 18 years old (English is my second language) A bit of story behind this:When i was in first grade(6 y/o) i kept on thinking a lot about my future and what would happen when i was got to 18 years of age.My child mind emidiatley didn't know what was going to happen and got scared,now for the next 12 years of my life all that can come to mind is suicide.I know,hard to imagine a 6 year old thinking about that already but unfortunatley it is like that.

Throught my years i've never been one to stress about not having a girlfriend,that was until i was listening to a podcast about 4 years back with Joe Sugg(Youtuber) and he got asked when he lost his verginity,i belive he said 21 to which the voice of the podcast (TrueGeordie) said he lost it pretty late and from that point on i beggan stressing i can think straight and getting not rejected but ignored by girls i like seems like an ecosistem now:Get attracted,gather confidence,shoot a dm,get ignored,be sad for the next month,repeat.I've been watching those AskReddit videos on Youtube and honestly im so dissapointed how things turned out with me while seeing people lose their v card at 14 im still on never actually having a girl,i've realised that days of fooling around have passed and my childhood has ended.And yeah i might have some selfconfidence isuess but once on a blue moon it does happen,where i look in the mirror and say ""You know...today is not that bad"" and i hate when i say that because it reminds me of the day before and the day before that etc.

Through the years i kept telling myself to just suck it up and be greatfull for what i have which is my loving parents and a roof over our heads.But honestly it's not going to hold up for much longer,i already told myself that i'll probably be gone in August but i fear it might be even quicker.Im not asking for any type of help i don't need help nor want it,i belive that only i can fix myself before its too late.If i could just start everything again id decline it for sure since my life can only go down for some reason.I've tried alcohol and it does work for the time that im drunk and a couple days after that before the cycle repeats but i've stoped drinking now for about a month so i guess thats a plus.

Last thing i want to write here is that when i get these lets call them ""episodes"" of sadness i keep seeing long narrow shadows quickly jumping from one side to the other and after dissapearing and also hearing my name being called yet either no one is around or the person whos voice i heard says they didn't call me.I read something about this mental desiese and it's a form of Schyzophrenia yet i doubt i have it.I also don't want to self diagnose cause i belive thats huge dissrespect for the person whos actually suffering and has to live with that disese.",5.033308080808077,5.4555645646853135,5.480442890442891,84.0703651903652,68.56293706293707,8.033877233877233,27.427350427350426,7.793537801064563,1.477478865578865,2249,66,457,24,36,721,290,572,0.10300000000000001,0.799,0.098,-0.2796,1,1,3,1,0,1,45.0,1,1,3,5,29,23,2,4,27,1,40,7,0,2,4,75,85,37,0,6,14,1,0,3,0,3,4,10,0,5,38,27,3,5,6,4,0,7,13,16,0,5,21,15,44,7,67,54,9,73,0,7,5,1,38,22,1,9,47,284,82,3,0.0,0.0,0.12750785187988845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.069819292599263,0.0,0.0,0.14418943115630334,0.10449083613253177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04442752520696251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631741843941665,0.12215189532342274,0.0,0.0,0.050235738058565016,0.05454890771631739,0.03982535490466632,0.0,0.2223685022003634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132486038849606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001316893914388,0.0,0.0,0.06711324279624506,0.0,0.056277131262957636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216172805185276,0.07228784229519555,0.0,0.16853313852434898,0.0,0.0,0.06630989563205543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11434372409922093,0.0,0.0,0.06399980341258202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728616705272505,0.04315070837116062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058715561044521074,0.0,0.0,0.07351587717385717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0555707715327602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365316339697136,0.0,0.11138785231073496,0.0,0.15675422939331252,0.0,0.07196979392581848,0.0,0.17331676200598928,0.0,0.058524013612090114,0.0645011344776098,0.0,0.0,0.07363312472792784,0.0,0.0875803883071951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822760653555232,0.0,0.0,0.05806946240986895,0.0,0.0,0.1077131239416972,0.053253730232724165,0.14739310705217354,0.0,0.0,0.06680568193617206,0.09229086040430554,0.09575272144808568,0.0,0.057688735995135514,0.05781614581670099,0.05486183900453187,0.07308901508328869,0.14263366577013195,0.05554233611729677,0.058964050150354275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583858564980545,0.1386123729723352,0.13193198095600867,0.0,0.15644046426256628,0.0,0.048026023589945004,0.0484423321227712,0.10077505425803432,0.0,0.1389611602537481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371084216661605,0.06957570372839125,0.1328105416961031,0.09937479719810367,0.0,0.0,0.07254267868345426,0.0,0.0,0.04529249836095477,0.11408954474291508,0.0,0.0,0.06175919669514016,0.0,0.0,0.06646542047458634,0.07043819259754185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534898090323438,0.0,0.0,0.06717145867524361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12429005655558988,0.15586221906084094,0.0,0.0,0.10412117736828007,0.059475163054443676,0.06815479550964125,0.0,0.0,0.054042727571299486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05029522755878802,0.0,0.0,0.04624183133638555,0.0,0.05217366163023943,0.0,0.1496735698733312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06157397833487019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710243695195093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08680642727053825,0.12558497978070673,0.0,0.0,0.03809520718317051,0.0,0.061926434667794635,0.062426858127702566,0.0,0.04435566514060681,0.0710616954864511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560228259187695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04756196545683681,0.0,0.0,0.0464094820148617,0.0,0.0,0.2944985125783329
mentalhealth,RestoreControl,2020/03/27,"TIME FOR REFLECTION: Are you facing your problems or are you avoiding them? Many ways of coping with mental health problems involve short-term strategies that help you avoid, suppress, or distract from the problems. This helps you feel better in the short-term, but causes more problems in the long-term as the problem gets bigger over time. 
This is especially difficult now in times of [coronavirus outbreak ](https://restorecontrol.co.uk/coping-during-coronavirus-outbreak/) as the problems are piling up! So let’s all share our ways of coping and exchange some idea and reflections. It’s up to you how you describe it, but it might be useful using this format: 
PROBLEM:
COPING STRATEGY:
REFLECTION:
Let me start with my example:

PROBLEM: Missing social contact

COPING STRATEGY: distracting myself from it by working longer on various projects that are important to me.

REFLECTION: working long-hours might help me get closer to my goals, but takes me further away from my needs for social contact. I should try to arrange more telephone or video calls with my friends to maintain the friendships even though this can’t replace normal face-to-face contacts. I can only do what I can do, and talking to people online could create some meaningful conversations.",9.299484890109897,11.296045802884615,7.450439560439563,68.10884615384616,59.72115384615386,9.019780219780221,37.4532967032967,9.23628265651192,3.8116142857142883,1029,47,141,16,14,304,127,208,0.165,0.705,0.13,-0.8144,0,2,0,0,0,0,44.0,1,7,1,4,5,17,0,4,6,0,17,2,1,4,1,43,26,14,0,12,6,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,11,6,0,3,7,1,1,0,1,14,0,0,0,1,21,3,28,19,6,18,0,1,0,0,24,11,0,7,5,103,32,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907413518999466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541835011986662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09862035060965976,0.0,0.0,0.0992156447873374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771123442447616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379106679545797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048834429443381816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461850675168147,0.0,0.10091953192680303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026614522664982,0.0,0.0,0.19420931699734326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511316895581352,0.0,0.0,0.1090285813925448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975219355404454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17094290030770642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791832371908557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733127852223614,0.20491508660527102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161384275760249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946292109053275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345446419236637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695734316630235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7393224204811941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969050347533864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836077234586385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261715095023454,0.07762842582686788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489068005589467,0.0,0.16895207502312515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06557239277287237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683054301751676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332355066436132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062473734072498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway9373928,2020/03/27,"Seeing things and feel really paranoid. Not sure what is happening to me. Hey guys. I hope you all are coping in times like these. I’m not sure if this is the right place to ask for guidance of this sort, I don’t use Reddit often so I apologize.
Story goes: I had my first experience a few months ago. It sounds really stupid but basically my mom showed me this Ring doorbell picture of a girl who had been prowling around our neighborhood stealing packages and it triggered something in me. Her face was so distorted but she looked so familiar (turns out she was a girl that went to my high school so that made sense). I started hyperventilating and had a mild panic attack. I was able to calm myself down until we got in the car to meet my tutor at a coffee shop and weird things started happening. An ambulance pulled onto our street and something took over me. As we were driving, I could see people were staring at me and felt they were out to get me. My mom tried to assure me that no one was looking at me but it turned into a full blown panic attack where I felt like I left my body. A feeling rushed over me and I felt like I could predict everything my mom was going to say- like she was lying to me and she was in on it. We turned around to head home and I slept it off. None of it made any sense at all.

After that I was put on Prozac for OCD/anxiety (only 20mg I think). Things were fine for a while until about a month ago when I stopped taking it simply because I forgot about it as I wasn’t really used to the routine. I woke up one morning and saw a man laying on my floor staring at me. I figured I was waking out of a dream and went on my phone for a little while to wake myself up, but when I looked over he was still there. He went away after a few seconds. Went to school that day hearing muffled voices/whispering that none of my friends could hear and they figured I was just goofing because that’s something I would joke about. It got really bad to the point where every corner I turned I saw something there. Called my dad, went home, took my medication and all was fine.

Every once in a while I’ll see everything out of the corner of my eye but nothing I wouldn’t consider normal until last night. I watched the movie “A Beautiful Mind” not knowing that it was about a man with schizophrenia and it freaked me the fuck out. When it was over I started seeing things in the kitchen following me around and in the shadows. I went to my mom who was asleep (it was like 4am- I’ve been on a weird sleep schedule with this whole corona thing) and had a panic attack in the corner of her room. Wouldn’t let her touch me and just screamed. There were faces everywhere but they weren’t really faces. I sat there for about an hour and eventually went back to my room, mostly  feeling normal, and fell asleep.

I’ve been seeing things again today. Nothing very intrusive- mainly just out of the corner of my eye. I’m seeing my psychiatrist Monday. 

I don’t think it’s schizophrenia. I’ve always been a very paranoid person but this is really getting to a point where I feel unsafe. How do I cope with this in the meantime? How can I make it go away? i feel like I’m losing it and I’m really scared.",2.3230092592592584,4.3710894799382745,3.372,90.12300000000002,77.81172839506172,6.1101234567901255,21.60246913580247,7.100725674708028,0.5585995061728402,2525,70,523,29,60,810,268,648,0.13,0.8,0.069,-0.9931,2,0,4,0,0,0,58.0,5,1,3,2,31,31,5,4,34,0,46,17,13,8,6,92,112,45,0,10,14,5,9,6,1,3,2,6,5,6,40,36,1,2,13,4,1,18,12,16,0,4,53,31,84,15,87,52,11,108,0,1,16,1,41,59,1,5,37,364,124,3,0.05490638704833964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09734239851305854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045686512483178614,0.0,0.0,0.03733822601310982,0.0,0.042003235806589684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466349759092064,0.05133006007276902,0.1873918254326484,0.10317271607930484,0.042219622471164085,0.04584453974404444,0.0669408478440165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06098861825178186,0.0,0.0,0.056065560078447055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13151484685416762,0.0,0.0,0.03541007735411017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252199836256314,0.0,0.09869264058954606,0.0537089822429206,0.0,0.0,0.13881159521990333,0.039225133878148716,0.158156226113121,0.0,0.0,0.04670334477437688,0.0,0.0,0.042420538432365235,0.050760070076456235,0.057372642110407636,0.0,0.062409130155514976,0.0,0.08782730703293999,0.0,0.0,0.054365955547730944,0.09710707347143777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05634979360464343,0.0,0.1237669773562814,0.0,0.0,0.0580116124864038,0.11015116600528768,0.054534431218018015,0.05407173119318975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030175114395695368,0.04475603370225582,0.0,0.0,0.059655950181941315,0.056145500778463496,0.0,0.16094692369849464,0.05503062424787207,0.0,0.0,0.13832260978099886,0.06142620259720756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390750201207616,0.036650439709849485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055312408506316815,0.0,0.0,0.05543979886731066,0.2572227876409095,0.08765150860899354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05152592478420295,0.10759320315515113,0.105368318412659,0.0,0.0,0.058473510255860874,0.07441197770484112,0.04175878152682085,0.0,0.19326244487777056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03806517542045548,0.04794213933253448,0.05736548823674074,0.0,0.10380856614673033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519608422944365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24622106251091336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04688975453588011,0.0,0.0436637627618481,0.054970871932052995,0.11113639001004773,0.2625196903417887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494603978441733,0.0,0.0,0.1690784769327204,0.0,0.0,0.11658907006331405,0.0,0.04384831162227558,0.045904198117676515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034972400053204,0.0,0.04128276987617252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21886418289466114,0.07036359159567432,0.0,0.0,0.032016355833355103,0.0,0.05204483488650034,0.0,0.12200603255737352,0.037277832655919496,0.2388895293705965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948429789049277,0.0,0.09060703915381983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3562913961415458,0.0,0.061301020319347664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03900392201793621,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Communismisbadithink,2020/03/27,"I'm not handling quarentine well at all. I live in the san Francisco area and am a senior in high school. I have a history of depression that hit a low my freshmen year, but since then I've been doing great. I've had many friends, girlfriends, and have felt happy on most occasions. Since we've entered quarentine, I have found myself having these severe mood swings. One minute I'm doing perfectly fine yet the next I'm shaking, breathing heavily, and in a deep depression. Does anyone have any advice for how I can cope while staying indoors?",4.899247572815535,6.733535271844659,5.24095873786408,80.41930218446602,70.06796116504854,8.645145631067964,30.350728155339805,9.188382445141503,2.7905155339805825,435,18,77,9,8,138,76,103,0.135,0.669,0.196,0.9009999999999999,2,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,3,11,0,1,6,0,11,1,1,1,2,11,17,7,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,4,1,1,4,1,6,6,7,12,2,18,0,3,0,0,2,9,0,1,6,45,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20546191700657032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429828120903545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701744895059882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621902250665818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839984012211878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201880881640459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305373057297556,0.1624449933244529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23181044997682834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238238043815812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22214937271764326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856618765078064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131688522771201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22361202173495695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14247642378225556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127925622876092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23753196162453186,0.0,0.34785557490230673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22410730625415692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18904740721003532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13539941186305582
mentalhealth,oliverstr,2020/03/27,Is this normal? I quite often think people are talking about me (sometimes i mishear a word as my name). I also occasionally think people are following me etc. More recently when i looked at certain people for a split second i hallucinated seeing them looking directly at me. I also have auditory hallucinatilns (more than once a week). To end it off my dreams have been feeling more real and are worsening.,5.622511415525113,7.944783602739728,7.097465753424661,65.84747716894981,69.13698630136986,9.250228310502283,31.34474885844749,9.725611199111238,3.572280365296804,325,14,49,8,6,111,53,73,0.043,0.866,0.091,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,5,1,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,0,1,10,14,5,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,4,12,1,8,13,4,8,0,0,3,0,3,3,0,1,4,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3407668922780301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18870730145193385,0.0,0.23761744044487335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772918436802544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578323051893253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087528783363794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269012022021646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4431254782111495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22661479274159085,0.0,0.2425081293053189,0.0,0.0,0.2103703562021928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16978067812145597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21072109673172187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712489957069744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730395944156676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709033198291199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AJ_AWESOME2005,2020/03/27,I’m looking for a person that used to post here Hey!! So about a year ago I found a person on here that had problems with her family and she said that she had attempted to end her life. So I messaged her and wanted to see if she needed anything she said that it was fine and that she’d message me if she needed anything. Since then I’ve sort of stopped using this app a lot and I came back to check on her and saw that she had deleted all of her former posts on all subs and was basically a shell account. She isn’t replying to any messages and I’m afraid she that she did something bad to herself and I’m writing this rn just to request any of her other social media or if anyone knows her personally pls pm me I just really wanna know what happened to her. Her @ is u/bippity-boppity-boo,1.7516465863453805,3.5573774578313286,3.653710843373496,88.5782369477912,78.63855421686749,6.354377510040162,23.717269076305215,7.3011,0.9484189558232928,622,21,132,8,15,210,95,166,0.057999999999999996,0.922,0.02,-0.7831,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,8,4,0,1,5,0,9,1,0,2,2,32,27,15,0,8,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,12,10,0,1,3,0,2,1,1,3,0,0,11,5,26,1,18,15,3,13,0,0,3,0,32,3,0,6,7,92,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13964668147884646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21426056619463488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015324636621517,0.0,0.25927838052982216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113591325976772,0.13153647201988872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18017989029200146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953065906085335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14851147629058414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17273073921440668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930908592302296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315597942814753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127275215476982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229105867175048,0.0,0.0,0.13393197492800835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23362277011970284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4126646207440709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3017530114292451,0.0,0.0,0.15074124047938006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092197326160733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29970674447775064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553626559128878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303158948668424,0.0,0.0,0.1605887140608685,0.0,0.12127936322621348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13170764293877718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27212206536835304,0.0,0.0,0.09291916218659133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144839867139507
mentalhealth,SeasInPeas,2020/03/27,"i'm concerned about my moms mental health. my mom is a very strange person, she believes in basically everything that probably isn't real like ghosts,aliens and pagan gods (she believes in ra and wotan and stuff like that) and this isn't very concerning at face value their are many weirdos out there but she began explaining why she believes and to me it sort of sounded like schizophrenia but im not certain (im not an expert) because she began explaining that she had seen ghost and aliens (again not that weird) bu then she began explaining further saying that she saw an alien in our house before i was born and pointed to the spot she saw it which was in the kitchen along with other stuff like visions of gods and demons (she had numerous anecdotes of aliens and gods and stuff) and from what she described to me it just sounded like she was having delusions but im not sure as to whether i should be concerned or whether shes just a bit weird.

thanks",6.5828746928746895,6.912845675675676,5.7031449631449656,84.1288697788698,65.21621621621622,8.457002457002458,32.49385749385749,8.00094639256281,2.190891891891892,770,29,148,8,11,231,103,185,0.125,0.833,0.040999999999999995,-0.8993,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,1,0,5,10,0,0,6,0,13,3,1,0,2,34,24,19,1,1,12,2,0,5,0,1,1,3,1,1,15,14,1,0,3,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,11,6,21,8,18,11,1,14,2,0,3,0,22,8,0,2,11,98,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692769663309275,0.0,0.10738320298069984,0.4265378472765353,0.0,0.0,0.13777296487371732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341651263340075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414007425010208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14561283617751414,0.0,0.0,0.4089388702454809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082640998004136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794258140852324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271755331683607,0.0,0.0,0.2955976389911684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018917355539096,0.0,0.0,0.11929567882169895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606025418977893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363827688132427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10035584560953607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4333914799187225,0.0,0.0,0.11893790619509376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161839991447612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20824925423978896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138719452013814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AlbatrossGooseswamp1,2020/03/27,"Am I depressed? I dont really feel happy or sad, just sort of empty. I can pretend to be happy throughout the day but as soon as I get home, nothing. Absolutely nothing. 
I also dont outright love anything or hate anything, most of its just neutral. I just do those things to pass time and get through the day and onto the next. 
I haven't really spoken to anyone about this mainly because it doesn't seem like depression and honestly others have it worse, so I just tend to live with I suppose. I've tried to reaching out to friends but I immediately get dismissive because I feel needy and stupid. I'm a mess.
I think about suicide, I've written notes and I think about how I might do it. 
All of my opinions on things are just neutral. It's like I dont love or like anything. This can spread from music, to shows, to even my family and friends.
Theres nothing I love, everything is sort of just there in my life, and I assume things will just be filtered out until the next batch of things in my life come in and I just find them neutral as well",3.067652608213096,4.624921292452832,4.079189789123198,88.02829633740289,74.28301886792453,6.686348501664817,26.621531631520533,7.285733465282438,1.2447521642619317,822,30,170,9,17,266,110,212,0.247,0.664,0.08800000000000001,-0.9891,0,0,0,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,1,0,19,18,2,0,5,0,17,5,0,1,1,39,33,20,1,0,13,0,2,3,2,2,2,0,1,0,13,12,0,0,7,2,0,2,5,6,1,0,1,2,23,12,30,28,3,16,0,3,0,3,6,7,0,10,10,120,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777695270824952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674842313099409,0.0,0.2709753118596003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13382028217756015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455058974088612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157533691530058,0.0,0.18907639090282813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3859221507642148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07249703090170996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864736881818634,0.0,0.10347422339478332,0.0,0.11099833623338322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032084632572977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16960431802031808,0.0,0.17203897329722534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336882345338297,0.0,0.10836764715880964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101006380391434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15505686027504667,0.16087309496833602,0.0,0.09692221133767304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29719455790189386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644056223015425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334671181385864,0.0,0.0,0.3159599532279617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14063320987101374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999235678069187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006225192472413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29168504888347363,0.14066262955468967,0.0,0.0,0.06400333891647472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07452146552740313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868958075342824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185726424595097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_madsobsession,2020/03/27,"There are some things that are really off with me Sorry for my bad english, its my second language.

I'm a 12 year old female that has been diagnosed with OCPD a month ago or so. My psychiatrist told me that it was normal for me to have anxiety/panic attacks, which i did three weeks ago, but this covid-19 isn't making me feel stressed or something. I'm pretty chill about this whole situation,but whenever someone asks me what i think, i say ""i think im going to die"" without even thinking. Am i crazy or something, or is it a part of OCPD? Am i turning to a maniac? Because i also enjoy reading books and watching movies that include people dying, getting stabbed, get injured, but i absolutely hate blood, and any Medical related stuff. Am i going crazy? Please help me",5.2709395973154365,6.2458836442953,6.059926174496642,78.15445302013423,68.26174496644296,8.644563758389262,32.3496644295302,8.841846274778883,2.7421189261744963,609,26,111,10,10,200,102,149,0.223,0.688,0.09,-0.9701,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,3,1,4,0,12,4,1,1,0,18,27,10,2,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,13,4,0,0,4,2,0,2,2,5,0,2,4,3,18,1,11,23,3,9,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,5,6,75,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26424625139072305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11919459410500305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135856942358223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393408850108645,0.16956498630347352,0.0,0.0,0.1244498590454562,0.0908590109649145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15128180398486116,0.3093790825792217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984455931258941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536375566399295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557441139897839,0.0,0.16941619425925936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14715523060069205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999045392133158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099871663833762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949150065220773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15015139164899252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896965213755802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14603657318478316,0.0,0.0,0.15640206618834368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16140576253796746,0.0,0.10333195058920072,0.0,0.0,0.16361126669198894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15163662400860384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908953822624346,0.0,0.09548473631782722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118529908936694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628890635365314,0.229490717317442,0.0,0.1668483803627109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17073535890430303,0.0,0.17062567817781382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902166780533518,0.28651413357742195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14242290120722814,0.0,0.0,0.16212273273758973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955828045412972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16640811273662132,0.0,0.14367811323957205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959828002163034
mentalhealth,korag411,2020/03/27,"I think i might have OCD. I just saw a list of OCD symptoms and for the past hour i can't stop thinking about it. I think i have it because i experience the following :

Constant thoughts about my sexuality. I sometimes can't stop thinking about if I'm gay, or bi, or what happens if i turn out to be or how will everyone else see it or how it will affect  everything even tough i know that I'm not

Constant need to snap my fingers or tap my leg when i feel stressed or anxious. I don't know why i do it, it just relives stress and makes me feel better a bit.

Constant needs to check my pockets when going outside to see if I have everything. I always think that I'm missing my wallet or keys or phone and i check every minute even tough i just checked 5 minutes ago.

Constant fear that wile I'm sleeping, a ghost or monster will kill or harm me. It wouldn't be a problem if i were 5 but I'm 19 and i cannot sleep at night thinking that some demon is watching me or will harm me. For some reason i get chills only writing on this subject.

Constant thoughts that my friends and family hate me or don't love me because of something I did 10000 years ago. I don't know why i always think that the people i love despise me for something that i did or that they might hate me if I'm not perfect.

Constant need to do everything perfect to the point where if i make a slight mistake I loose my shit. I was just playing with a drawing book when i drew outside the line and just lost my mind. I didn't even wanted to do it anymore, it was ruined in my mind.

Constant need to re-write emails 10000 times until they feel 100% right. Even this post went trough the same treatment... If i write anything I will re-write until I feel like there is not a single flaw, spell checking and stuff like that.

I know i might be overthinking some of this worries but I don't have the money for proper therapy and i really need to get some help before i loose my mind.",3.8305656398973222,4.416810393564359,4.557436743674369,89.0386817015035,71.3019801980198,7.074294096076276,28.824349101576825,6.775458762138228,1.2642579024569116,1525,56,332,11,27,490,174,404,0.193,0.7509999999999999,0.055999999999999994,-0.9953,0,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,2,4,19,26,5,3,14,0,34,10,5,6,2,89,81,37,2,16,30,0,5,2,1,9,1,0,0,0,23,10,0,2,18,2,5,3,12,17,0,0,11,9,58,9,26,58,7,32,1,3,4,4,10,7,1,27,23,210,81,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122491559662937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497995231490114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805415432555568,0.0685205760359025,0.0,0.0,0.05685672742389741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423553336291524,0.0,0.05879209812065436,0.0,0.0,0.061106150151778935,0.07543043459678582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5226464127822632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05771739721471743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18253813146591374,0.0,0.058212885935010686,0.0660202489487661,0.18628597082666032,0.06758511299638635,0.06513367222920567,0.07774756984848408,0.13973971512941716,0.04935925044087942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05338021246337904,0.0,0.0721953077121329,0.0,0.03926650568883782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061097718288830385,0.0,0.0,0.13642784799384092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04631082848381221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804158094214588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643992463332322,0.0,0.15188435386006732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750960187245847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542194501728773,0.0,0.12471623229830428,0.0,0.09223872826165573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21988668768880035,0.20928929842668934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561537551563035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483804576733856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052547485545652896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595601411364542,0.0478996077487179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531415584536035,0.0,0.06617091901420387,0.0,0.0,0.06611159483457581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04426202534196312,0.07103795636999075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900408509598951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011456057312012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709218184423643,0.0,0.0,0.1382835478333149,0.0,0.0,0.10638060424484244,0.06833363262190659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552780511682872,0.15828902239279682,0.0,0.07909366860853986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181291458373748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901258229705464,0.0,0.0,0.3098989929767699,0.0,0.1097024647494041,0.0402880288615976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751521214977661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04075217892139125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404886180052742,0.12468934413648758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016615447632375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04449290325760076
mentalhealth,RedKingdom93,2020/03/27,"Wtf is wrong with me? Lately I’ve been feeling very distant and disconnected from life and society. It only seems to get worse too the older I get. Just the walk to and from my car, I begin to feel extremely paranoid that everyone in the apartments are judging and watching me. Just the sight of another person looking at me overwhelms me with anxiety and rejection. I don’t even know how to bond or interact socially anymore. I literally only have enough energy to go to work and then come home and just want to drink and forget about everything. Hell only reason I can hold a job is because I work around a bunch of animals at a farm and don’t have to hardly deal with humans. Anytime I go somewhere, I just want to be unnoticed and left alone. My perception of life and how I’ve been abused and treated like shit my whole just makes me want to end it all as the months and years progress.",3.485561904761901,5.484939765714286,4.536000000000001,83.32133333333334,74.2,8.095238095238095,27.666666666666664,8.841846274778883,2.2681809523809524,709,28,136,15,15,231,107,175,0.184,0.748,0.068,-0.9747,1,1,1,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,0,3,11,7,2,1,8,0,11,4,1,4,1,39,26,18,0,3,6,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,2,3,18,1,1,6,1,0,5,2,5,0,0,2,6,16,2,24,23,4,18,1,2,3,0,5,6,2,2,8,90,19,3,0.0,0.17501164157509008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529825281100498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15488632315325546,0.11299738754984487,0.0,0.1464881648384198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149279956645052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004235961219477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723868257425588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15228204141114993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469910758561175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13082680268802396,0.1526234316253179,0.0,0.09756075269078744,0.0,0.0,0.1411427876148178,0.13275180284163848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14937275493441687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15434426778832125,0.0,0.16789346181098436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231872740929068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816470392281147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14657891838488035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117729575482753,0.0,0.16662278567661307,0.0,0.1604868385236526,0.0,0.2086632212402371,0.07216341615463867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403880513952655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859725947867004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790033907417626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370192650054257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12897426577019006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186999970722906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13446921019439964,0.0,0.0,0.15162171177869174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505712661989361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187583315190567,0.2613687266829284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649124172747549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21506859676600126,0.0,0.1505286321113308,0.0,0.16149718522341913,0.0,0.0951200956501626
mentalhealth,DJreddit91,2020/03/27,"I know Im a stranger but if anyone out there is feeling alone, depressed, scared, etc. And just needs a human to connect with, youre welcome to message me. We’re all in this together. I don't know how to sew, I am unable to donate blood, I've lost my job so I have no money to give... But maybe I can help someone in some small way. Even if it's just by letting someone else know they're not alone.",0.10661498708010342,2.024183046511631,1.9948062015503891,97.78029715762275,84.81395348837209,4.28733850129199,21.183462532299746,5.033348758259628,-0.28184599483204176,306,10,72,1,9,101,67,86,0.212,0.687,0.10099999999999999,-0.8798,1,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,6,4,0,1,2,0,6,1,1,1,1,18,13,7,0,3,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,4,0,2,0,3,3,0,0,1,1,8,1,10,11,3,5,0,2,0,0,6,4,0,3,0,44,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4348112709077965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14677542509105942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18079698915819573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17535462908207522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341074857519731,0.13864496616792346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613786785722162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20136681930383085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069965977592208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267410953871348,0.0,0.20830537506012475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34608661105361777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21464935018438733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291438601077935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108849244039516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15564716668117767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21015863739183951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.355715692146728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666184589980853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashash_,2020/03/27,"How is COVID-19 affecting your mental health? International survey by UTAustin psychologists provides personalized feedback on how you are dealing with COVID-19. **The study aims to understand the short- and long- term psychological effects of covid. Please take the 15-20 minute survey, get personalized feedback, and share it widely to support psychological research.** 

 [http://utpsyc.org/covid19/index.html](http://utpsyc.org/covid19/index.html)",14.720590909090907,20.733829490909084,8.116704545454546,49.11505681818184,63.18181818181818,9.295454545454543,41.42045454545455,9.188382445141503,5.8405000000000005,382,19,35,9,8,98,45,55,0.0,0.8759999999999999,0.124,0.7351,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,4,0,8,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,6,6,1,5,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,18,3,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30459741076277536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15436115742455778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140510125678436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614651836093217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297745511090983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5159535168373899,0.0,0.3243169047907652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352747371050202,0.0,0.0,0.22214267655704376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075753175514713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Witchking344,2020/03/27,Stockholm Syndrome Is this a real entity in domestic affairs? How do you treat/counsel someone who is a victim of domestic violence but still wishes to go back to the abuser despite there being 100% chance they will continue to abuse them?,10.569767441860467,9.350743302325583,10.35779069767442,59.09622093023259,57.83720930232558,13.251162790697675,44.75581395348837,12.161744961471696,5.932823255813954,194,10,27,5,2,64,38,43,0.28300000000000003,0.635,0.08199999999999999,-0.9146,0,0,0,0,3,0,4.0,0,1,2,0,4,1,1,0,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,4,7,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,5,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,23,5,0,0.0,0.7311851333448249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372632191201793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536148189507328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3512082778688486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614414739029514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464160255244231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35482821187216945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plasmsphere,2020/03/27,"I don‘t know why I‘m doing the things I am doing I feel lost since the last couple of days I started “relearning” mathematics. I say “relearning” because I was always bad at maths and got the worst possible grades in it. I hated it so much and got panic attacks during lessons and learning. At the same time I WANTED to understand it I was immensely jealous of people who were good at it it almost made me angry to see them succeed and get praise. I often watch videos about sciency things like space or about biology or anything that seems worth knowing (which is everything). At the same time I understand very little about what seems so fascinating about these things to me because I feel like I’m not very smart. So for some crazy reason I cannot explain I ended up sitting in front of my desk day and night for the last few days and still, forcing myself to get better, to be smarter, to know more, but it also stresses me so much because it doesnt make any sense for me to suddenly be interested in maths. Imagine someone who cant read telling you they’re trying to read the biggest book they know. For some reason I feel kind of ashamed and scared and like I shouldn’t educate myself in maths. It sounds strange I know and I can’t really explain why either. Just imagine a person you know that’s really bad at maths wanting to do nothing else but to get better and showing a huge interest in it. I really want to do nothing else right now but to understand this thing I never understood. I told some people and they think I’m crazy for voluntarily learning maths all day maybe because I was always so bad at it. Sometimes I even feel if I manage to get really good at maths I can learn anything. Like I could become really smart and people will praise me for it and tell me how smart I am. I know myself that this sounds selfish and grandiose or something. Maybe I want people to think I am smart. Because I‘ve always felt stupid and like all the numbers were laughing into my face. I just really want to be the opposite of what I am. But I also want to stop learning maths because it feels unnatural and leaves me feeling depressed at night not knowing who I am anymore or what my passions are. It sounds ridiculous but I truly don‘t know why I am doing maths its like someone else is controlling me.",5.297266666666669,6.229569082222228,5.704888888888894,80.87800000000003,68.17777777777778,8.4,30.11111111111111,8.548686976883017,2.246911111111111,1837,68,345,27,30,589,196,450,0.153,0.696,0.15,-0.6603,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,3,8,18,38,5,4,11,0,32,2,1,6,3,90,80,34,0,9,15,0,7,6,0,2,0,4,0,1,31,17,0,2,35,5,1,1,10,16,0,0,12,13,55,22,46,62,13,39,2,2,2,1,17,20,0,12,23,231,86,20,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597104061443604,0.0,0.0,0.10537119872939503,0.16445664261215104,0.0,0.0,0.04480183871531459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653369777823129,0.0,0.0,0.10843010819184444,0.0,0.0,0.07494998411417259,0.0,0.0,0.16502548955079094,0.24096536355431325,0.07276119981103796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11653408087922447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389196740200794,0.052601204240045565,0.07289688625464788,0.0,0.1699530742524986,0.0,0.056743841481598375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16510720651976132,0.0,0.05835166212906639,0.0,0.0,0.04351426436405115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059210254988130415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19987070725879968,0.04706592436872644,0.06325679686063121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768194866030625,0.0,0.0,0.11051694650522356,0.10538328315621197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504457338910738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860568844119183,0.3258619054659161,0.10740481364924087,0.0,0.06975924437980276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19311892629109495,0.0660308058312838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07191769583652256,0.0,0.0,0.062338890241086416,0.04397656943180731,0.0,0.1323741150442077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686131077485316,0.0,0.05081205521085351,0.0,0.0,0.12365108995959095,0.0,0.12643060239579618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729802055138849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18269639797655346,0.05752538948393536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427175685954028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13179912628480386,0.0,0.25323315713394445,0.13547479153167238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0562626413847192,0.0,0.05239179966057388,0.06595910950550624,0.0,0.052499212746733116,0.11995251368692655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05449805167193065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111642759880418,0.050718977992628186,0.0651587201202582,0.0,0.046631430847938686,0.0,0.05261323836194827,0.05508008012222917,0.0754673044038864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151670798071732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17507558820394786,0.08442871069966798,0.0,0.0,0.07683233851519715,0.0,0.0,0.0629528207189638,0.0,0.0447293732091235,0.0,0.0,0.2057556275175441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087186614922827,0.2331525240569478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783440547099646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nottoc54,2020/03/27,"Behavioral Health Crisis Services Preparedness in COVID-19 Crisis services must be prepared and equipped to respond to the influx of crisis requests in the wake of COVID-19. Here is an article that explains more:

 [https://www.tbdsolutions.com/helping-when-it-matters-most/](https://www.tbdsolutions.com/helping-when-it-matters-most/)",27.01857142857143,32.06723842857143,15.846428571428573,12.621071428571467,21.857142857142854,11.571428571428573,54.64285714285714,11.20814326018867,7.117857142857144,295,13,21,4,2,73,27,35,0.272,0.6859999999999999,0.042,-0.9081,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,3,2,1,0,1,3,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,16,1,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,foreversuperawesome,2020/03/27,"How to help a parent with mental illness that don't want to help themselves?  

Hello everyone! I need to vent and if any of you have tips to help me, I'd highly appreciate it. This is about helping and/or coping with a parent that has mental illness and refuses to seek help. 

I’m trying to make this as quick and comprehensive while maintaining a degree of privacy.

My mother, in her late 50s, has been starving for attention most of her life. I’ve been told from her siblings, she had ‘episodes’ in her youth. Growing up, we never got along so I moved away from my family/mother at the age of 18 (in my 30s now). You know what they say: ""cut toxic people out of your life' and honestly it has worked out great for me. Unfortunately, the rest of my family cannot say the same… Now that I live away and am happy, my family is asking to help them because of my level of ‘separation’ from the family. 

The issue is: She makes up stories (and possibly fakes being ill) to get attention and accuse other people of lying or seem to be paranoid about my father/brother. Such as coming up with reasons why she can't work, or why she is better staying at home and looking after my father who works 40-70hrs a week to support her. She tracks every work hours he has to ensure he is not going to visit friends/family. He is a reserved man, and will stop on his way home to see his son. She even takes his money, and give him only $5/week so he can purchase himself a fast food coffee while at work.

I always thought that was the way my mother was… until last Fall. Her brother committed suicide. Everyone was grieving. Two days later, she faked her own suicide attempt. (and I say faked it because she lied about the amount of medicine she took and faked being ill from it to get us to give her attention). She was hospitalized right away as ambulances were called and doctors found nothing wrong with her. They did put her on suicide watch for 4 days, then into a transition house for 3 days where she begged to leave and go back home… Apparently we were not fair to her as we were asking her to give up her belonging/house/husband for the week she had to be there. Because the transition house was only a voluntary one, she checked herself out with the help of a ‘friend’ whom had confided in me that they didn’t feel good about helping her but there was no reasoning my mother. She played the 'being sweet' card and it worked on them. Beside faking illnesses, lying and attempting to get attention, she will say comments about people and then will deny it! 

All of her remaining siblings and family have disowned her now after the incident. Her husband, my father, left for a few days but she begged him to come back and live with her, which he did and he regrets as she has blocked him from messaging his own son to seek help/talk as she thinks his son will try to help him move and divorce her. Mind you my father has always supported her his entire life and been the bread winner, tho he does not know are the bills are being handled, he just hands her the money. (She can’t live without him because he makes money, and it would be difficult for me to live alone as he does not know what accounts he has, and how bills are paid etc…) 

I flew back to my home when the incident happened. She was shocked to see me at her transition house, but she also seemed to be happy to see me. It seemed that I was the only person that she trusted after the incident. I was really clear with her that what she did and what she has done to others was a terrible act. I even started calling her by her first name… She reassured me she was going to get well and her therapist from the transition house will be in touch with her to make an appointment with a psychiatrist. It has been over 6month and my mother still tells me she is still on a waiting list to see a psychiatrist. While I want to believe her, I strongly think she is making it up and refuses to see a doctor. 

Before I left, I ensured she had a ‘wellness’ binder where I had a place where she could write down her thoughts and issues, a place for her future doctors appointments, ways to become her better self but she has not used it. I offered to sign her up to a local gym or take a simple class to keep her active as she prefers sitting on front of the TV and gossiping against the neighbors. 

I live in a different country than she does so in-person help is difficult. I always kept my communication with her to a minimum. We never really got along because of her dramatic ways and now, I don’t believe the woman she has become is my mother anymore. I am angry at the way she is handling things, I am helpless when family members come to me with another story of how she is trying to create stories to gang everyone up on each other. While the ordeal has made me closer to my brother, I feel sorry for my father who is being manipulated into sticking around and paying for her. (She made threats in the past of wiping the bank account clean and getting every penny out of him if he ever left her- so you can see why he rather stay at home and live miserably than try to get out and figure out the logistics of living alone after 38years with her). 

I intend to visit again in the Fall but this time, I would like a plan of action that I could help her seek help and if anything else fails, help my father get out of this situation. 

In my last visit, it seemed she was open to the idea of me being her emergency contact and have the doctors information where I could ask private details but my visit was so short, I never was able to secure this in writing. She did agree, with me, to never speak ill of people (but that didn’t last a whole week!) and she acted like she was truly going to try and be better but 6 months has passed and she was already back being her old self within weeks of me leaving.

Sorry for the vent! I don’t know what to do; I want to help her because in return it would help everyone in my family and myself. Despite never being close to my own mother, I feel like a ‘normal’ person would help a person in distress… or am I giving myself too much pressure to help an helpless cause?",6.620430236978834,5.974606356672162,7.0126161449752935,78.05123444430366,65.33443163097199,9.744245342795592,31.032771511848946,9.01499896408226,2.428942988214421,4823,150,936,69,65,1576,438,1214,0.095,0.792,0.113,0.9809,4,2,0,0,1,3,115.0,5,5,5,15,45,42,2,2,59,0,105,16,1,16,9,173,177,83,4,18,23,19,5,3,2,9,13,5,6,7,41,76,2,8,26,3,12,24,20,20,2,3,46,19,181,22,179,105,11,154,0,6,8,0,207,65,0,12,60,690,222,13,0.035692760628437716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739338712753387,0.0393878489101993,0.0285434877791224,0.08909770839089674,0.0,0.0,0.0242723011842524,0.03742697162804644,0.0,0.0,0.03539762761252488,0.0,0.0,0.029372100776902693,0.0317741242640022,0.10010373905722547,0.0,0.10060357063274716,0.10978211896255803,0.0,0.13054785354521356,0.07883969975265248,0.030371910398761377,0.08042703712542379,0.0,0.09470203870328038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289259858302105,0.0,0.0,0.03666629718882086,0.0,0.09223845848515624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549329504632554,0.0,0.0,0.0920755112677141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03729133803986768,0.0,0.1461322117398922,0.09370492606564552,0.03652608638469389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02981672151005055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039806863055879466,0.04714946353728082,0.032286145437532165,0.06014538049120342,0.1364238494405021,0.0,0.0,0.2355357070230029,0.0,0.05414199666359679,0.02549891532470669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030360243956893893,0.043159827830353735,0.03913526973677547,0.027576138321810054,0.0,0.1305359598479364,0.136958993417545,0.08114007362053045,0.029937394183575536,0.057093522540595326,0.03935139459936678,0.0,0.0,0.03156299034657529,0.0759912147863179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43063389140648906,0.037711361272486296,0.17901374560070096,0.0,0.03515017945989786,0.1647386142537711,0.0,0.040292782211750575,0.0,0.0745079376515004,0.0,0.031725365629843225,0.0,0.0,0.07846323118023106,0.08728309128443454,0.04026298865610063,0.0755869597554552,0.11634086657521706,0.0,0.07563255717660489,0.052313039796228165,0.0,0.2206215308961927,0.0,0.029972929476415583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754670624295056,0.11912597439155345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193981537314326,0.0,0.03603951337241538,0.0,0.028489621004819506,0.07587151180949282,0.026238285923575848,0.026465729744658825,0.13764228692773614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03497132712522747,0.03424816646206347,0.0,0.037453548110946575,0.0,0.024186338337734915,0.08143785850595947,0.0,0.0,0.0792651734488828,0.0,0.03407277873989206,0.09897946432830483,0.12466216738718068,0.07458267607973536,0.0,0.0,0.040238224672731866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035881082838215866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045731392847894736,0.07339620509384419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030481422554755038,0.0,0.1135372634169827,0.0,0.0,0.1706550543814083,0.1299733949991653,0.07447066727461532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04012015841441106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799102466283663,0.025263519682438958,0.07608746751399695,0.0570085694881777,0.029840746101398318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171262608741212,0.08100744356560255,0.0,0.0,0.05367302794743487,0.0286884889753954,0.031197046011361588,0.0,0.0,0.041442046108901266,0.02371268417072673,0.045740959600391366,0.0,0.056672130037857135,0.020812735756019586,0.0,0.0,0.034105962360125516,0.03965597036517627,0.12116520766184052,0.0,0.03486664077301932,0.0,0.04293399630230792,0.030827085201956657,0.0,0.0,0.06315754495857807,0.14165626012799445,0.1431528981100033,0.0,0.0641841566663876,0.0,0.09662149444016746,0.0398496925796839,0.0,0.03440654754668066,0.0,0.1559085290173803,0.0,0.0,0.101420452300443,0.03902443060376326,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,root363,2020/03/27,"Talked myself into a panic attack I sleep alone, but sometimes I let my two large dogs sleep in the bed with me. Often times I end up putting them in their crates at some point because they hog the bed, or decide to play bitey face with each other and it disrupts my sleep. So then I got to thinking, what if I die in the middle of the night and they’re in their crates? No one would find them (or me) for several hours or maybe even a day or two. They’d be stuck in there with no water or food and they’d be sad and I’d be sad (even though I’m dead) and it’s just horrible to think about and I can’t breathe right now thinking about it!",2.3645652173913017,3.1459600942028985,3.1311304347826088,97.19321739130436,74.86956521739131,6.0997101449275375,20.321739130434786,5.6839178017228535,-0.3322052173913041,495,9,122,2,10,156,87,138,0.22,0.759,0.021,-0.9824,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,7,0,10,5,1,1,6,0,8,7,5,0,0,27,14,16,2,2,8,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,5,11,2,0,5,1,0,1,3,4,0,3,2,0,18,1,18,5,2,19,0,2,0,0,8,11,0,8,7,82,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651924853554496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18145272522394956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722888852318873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028634256824104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16553440331370795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126845041804467,0.0,0.0,0.21069469055376167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577886438789706,0.0,0.19286638461707611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12756563025158754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15707402860175748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630981623951983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16023781864510184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149678665814666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10808040408918576,0.0,0.0,0.18713728427347429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15077776620265326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16034018370864747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362109642612266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18018805999588614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47884147414192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774823007186925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819896248334986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066008583856851,0.15670660074488876,0.0,0.09300493771736038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3116139840069172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330325527653265,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fruityconfetti,2020/03/27,"Anyone else with a parent that took their own life? (i hope my english is fine)
i want to write here since I've been feeling really alone in my situation. my father hung himself when i was 3 (i am now 16) and even if it has been 13 years it still haunts me every day of my life. especially the past few weeks I've been having a depressive episode and when i see or read something about fathers or suicide i start sobbing and i dont know how to deal with it. if anyone has been in a simialr situation how did you overcome it? tips on how to cope? i feel stupid for still grieving everyday after so long but i am in pain anyway. he brought me to life just to take his own a bit later and it feels like ive been abandoned and tossed a heavy burden i dont think i can continue holding all my life if it doesnt get any lighter. i know i will have to accept it and move on with my life, but the feelings of bitterness and guilt have really latched onto me. it feels like a stain in my life that ill never be able to wash off :-(",2.6554166666666674,3.6486638935185214,4.0425925925925945,90.1241666666667,74.41666666666666,7.066666666666667,24.61111111111111,7.413659706084162,0.8894222222222217,795,24,181,9,16,263,129,216,0.175,0.762,0.063,-0.9766,1,1,1,0,0,1,17.0,0,1,1,0,14,14,2,1,8,0,22,9,0,3,2,37,38,20,2,5,8,3,5,2,0,1,9,0,0,0,10,10,0,2,9,1,0,3,4,9,0,0,9,7,28,5,23,27,5,27,0,4,1,0,10,8,1,6,18,122,38,1,0.12006949258809466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243557832569364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165137231824585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16791076194470567,0.12302538431267655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13108478818026348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743488961803321,0.12378637462459835,0.10341567802657492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814411021646552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10030265407657818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930476745208223,0.0,0.10116372606022177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035537156856469,0.17155533899190764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273135419172796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192560981869554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197410607582186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5088518009503425,0.1173197782684156,0.0,0.0,0.10625772257387914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12761486873614486,0.0,0.0,0.09260499473336252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776240564240113,0.0,0.13332296225262932,0.0,0.1146199168216126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201019850980067,0.0,0.15383918301401175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567984014310127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932272503277244,0.2699262807671015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09243536145897943,0.0,0.0,0.08498580484814018,0.0,0.1917753037618777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133653682414434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027731559352356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07693568265683236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340162419495222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082009762174164,0.0,0.09631250447402366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732081659378473
mentalhealth,Cariad_Bach,2020/03/27,Isolation Anyone's mental health really suffering from this isolation? I can't cope,5.956428571428575,9.791686071428572,7.368571428571433,54.701428571428615,81.14285714285714,14.228571428571426,28.42857142857143,11.20814326018867,6.734685714285716,71,3,8,4,2,24,13,14,0.524,0.47600000000000003,0.0,-0.8313,0,2,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4007175327980631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6091673843257375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5775394662892279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3671358354346877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skiora,2020/03/27,"Dont know why im so scared For the last few years at night im always afraid of irregular things, like meeting a ghost in the corridor or opening my door to see a scary woman ghost etc..

I dont know why my brain just loves to focus on these types of things, am i purposely scaring myself? If so how do i make it stop because it only digs into my anxiety and insecurity..

Any help would be appreciated..",3.3052208835341403,4.30461207228916,5.443554216867472,80.67368473895584,72.855421686747,8.424899598393575,25.88152610441768,8.841846274778883,1.7597405622489957,314,10,67,6,6,110,63,83,0.201,0.701,0.098,-0.8147,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,4,4,0,6,2,1,2,0,12,11,6,2,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,7,2,9,9,2,9,0,0,1,1,4,5,0,2,5,40,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866206481446273,0.0,0.0,0.12149707810728035,0.0,0.13667683139954034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891140645268503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994471784246396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4187837950723226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19925665527930314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975415273815035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3859737516387823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19637720492359145,0.14563432447448918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728579728121295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612504809409569,0.0,0.11925904927915665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766327639288814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588138705485442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3577459903107853,0.0,0.1423714100707256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14937040506951765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373917346323332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3224314323756954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691718557383008,0.0,0.0,0.11505321988219075
mentalhealth,jaseerkb6,2020/03/27,"A dilemma on loneliness This is my first post.  So the issue is simple.  I am 24 and i dont have a stable job.  Still trying to figuring out,  what i wanted to be in life.  
And i lost interest in what i have learned until post graduation. During all these years,  i stayed single and my friends are getting girlfriends and all and i am stuck with my own self.  And i can't even support my family in any of the stuff.  I had some ailments which lasts till this day.  
To escape loneliness i started online dating,  eventually those become disastrous months in my life..  
And i am nowhere in the middle,  emotionally broken,  highly worried and completely bamboozled.  
I donnow where is this gonna end?",2.699792802617232,5.3196347099236645,4.18294983642312,81.73902671755727,79.76335877862596,7.1016357688113425,24.62431842966194,8.192908349453996,1.8731784078516904,541,20,97,11,14,179,88,131,0.20600000000000002,0.736,0.057,-0.9534,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,5,0,13,2,0,0,2,16,20,11,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,9,10,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,17,3,14,15,5,24,0,1,0,0,3,10,0,1,11,76,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605439265358506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047208131167912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19435142326150007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954493481081856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21724611720453293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085104046344632,0.16417815743558628,0.0,0.0,0.12243167520495128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747453978898862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767116944329446,0.0,0.0,0.14321235310569852,0.0,0.09684543600999793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19584804527834904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19347264928107694,0.18394592120941425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109701901585754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26185722255621724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20234753147797133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14795638227426494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3550563994361017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19337587035009396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13120213059682426,0.1975741696928371,0.1480325361063057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21219830110197144,0.0,0.21034973201689264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585050380363635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933293758470453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18824691074105498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193688274732253
mentalhealth,E-q-r,2020/03/27,"What’s the point in even living anymore? Life has only brought me pain and suffering as long as I’ve been here. I don’t feel pain, I don’t have emotions. I don’t cry when someone that I closely know dies, I don’t cry when anyone dies. My sadistic behavior takes me to quite the places sometimes, but I try to control it. I take meds for Anxiety, Depression, Schizophrenia, and what not. But all they do is seem to calm me down here and there, the rest is pure anger and sadness awaiting to be released. I just want to know why, why am I here. I honestly wish I can get an answer, but the answers I get never seem to get to me.",2.641923076923078,3.859618576923083,3.73076923076923,91.4692307692308,74.76923076923076,6.7384615384615385,26.84615384615385,7.1686216300943375,1.122061538461538,485,18,108,5,10,157,80,130,0.193,0.721,0.087,-0.9259999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,1,2,8,8,1,0,5,0,13,3,0,1,3,23,26,11,2,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,7,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,2,1,18,2,12,23,2,10,0,3,0,0,1,5,0,2,4,71,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586978695383245,0.0,0.15021190152381442,0.10590737127592112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16988010935816514,0.0,0.0,0.33275287721591595,0.0,0.0,0.13045599319141116,0.0,0.3143920931828701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17037696865147245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004075204261301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658490902421608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374015605222185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16648165357718533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698372552879376,0.0,0.0,0.13374576574038954,0.13404115311288387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824270958510096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681861776627098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519543735259713,0.32233742192011433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15824797239671062,0.0,0.14318273595385012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16110094388505775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27577484886900105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283352231938096,0.0,0.1498020811848995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277646309175901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283432799871016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893375777199165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733459723497549,0.0,0.17417648809224054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fluff_the_protogen,2020/03/27,"scared for my bfs mental health hey, my bf has been suffering mentally for as long as ive known him, but its started to escalate in a bad way. about a few minutes ago he started ranting to me and our friends about feeling very genocidal, feeling like there were bugs under his skin, cutting his arm open, feeling like hes experiencing a drug withdrawl (hes never taken drugs), suicidal thoughts, and more. all of us told him that he should go to a professional, but hes refused saying that he'd probley be sent to a psych ward or a mental hospital and he wasnt gonna attempt it and that hes never going to go to one. do any of you know how we can either convince him to go to one or help him with his problems? anything will help",7.389031639501437,5.499889724832219,7.916797698945353,76.21523489932889,64.50335570469798,10.661936720997122,38.06423777564717,9.23628265651192,3.331353978907,575,25,117,8,7,192,100,149,0.10099999999999999,0.7120000000000001,0.187,0.9363,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,3,1,0,1,4,9,1,1,6,0,15,5,2,1,3,25,30,11,2,2,5,0,4,2,2,3,3,1,0,0,5,7,0,1,6,0,0,5,3,5,0,2,7,6,20,4,19,18,4,15,0,1,0,0,28,3,0,2,8,77,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13001569993087286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974185274714298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069839313236533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246482547953758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3401854426949097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22248500534264887,0.20956472468122084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331826788690792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334278531531233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15590526339944352,0.0,0.0,0.19662203000010614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060698479962328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14331286439090146,0.0,0.0,0.12979992641032825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4434320267247694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22624466646670144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19877721347163135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034510295429695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663930134895314,0.14684405766100905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20763010815597605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043514204728498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644102481659667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015118919710368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642811468611386,0.0,0.0,0.12101959469046318,0.0,0.1164212468454716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Queenhotsnakes,2020/03/27,"How to motivate my husband who's struggling to do school solely online? With COVID-19, all his classes went online. He just can't get motivated enough to do it. He sits down to attempt to do it and gets distracted or discouraged somehow. I have no idea how to help him.

Any suggestion helps!",3.020969696969697,5.773773309090912,3.861363636363638,83.7053787878788,79.54545454545455,7.303030303030304,29.166666666666664,8.344100000000001,2.513666666666667,232,11,42,5,6,74,44,55,0.19899999999999998,0.679,0.122,-0.6088,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,4,3,0,2,0,0,5,0,0,4,1,12,8,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,4,0,8,7,2,3,0,1,0,0,9,1,0,2,0,29,7,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309531047344685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35091803140451683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3548746482375946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4552799756270727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3833894066966763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437133611113346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35504434613852504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148309498466293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustHereForDogPics,2020/03/27,"I'm in lockdown alone and I'm not coping So a bit of background: about two years ago I had a bit of a breakdown and was diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I have been on sertraline ever since and completed two months of CBT about a year and a half ago. I generally manage to keep on top of my negative thoughts and feelings but the last two weeks have been so difficult.

I live in the UK which is now in lockdown due to the coronavirus. I live in a flat by myself. I asked my boyfriend of just over a year to stay with me but he went home to his family. My family only live a couple of miles away and I did consider moving back in with them during lockdown but my mum and dad are always at each others throats and it's not always a good environment, which is why I moved it in the first place. I am also a massive germphobe and my dad is the opposite and ridicules me for being anxious about all this. 

I know I can talk to people on the phone and by video call but I feel so alone and can't stop crying all the time. I don't know how I can take another 3 weeks of this misery. Can anyone give me some advice on what to do?",2.6816877637130787,3.834037949367087,4.232763713080171,88.1670358649789,74.56962025316456,7.79831223628692,24.13713080168776,8.344100000000001,1.269715611814346,882,26,196,15,18,295,131,237,0.129,0.84,0.031,-0.971,0,5,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,12,4,1,0,17,0,19,2,1,1,3,37,31,22,0,0,7,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,8,17,0,2,5,1,0,3,5,3,0,5,7,2,25,1,35,23,6,36,0,1,0,0,11,16,0,1,16,142,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123040420315416,0.20374935791247287,0.0,0.0,0.23805668440434774,0.0,0.09190602283936428,0.19125474050157215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205095934972399,0.08791782878342329,0.1298333033720449,0.0,0.08035870591916112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743999471137276,0.0,0.10797645720854206,0.08837075212044114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25093814885604976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735196627042548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120497386390299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12716307632114332,0.12624046032775044,0.0,0.0,0.0989853176975619,0.11664714357737213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039568549904836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21668340139843267,0.0,0.11621975142955715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977557226398894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024718207611632,0.0,0.09639420574241192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527982507990492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021512227491774,0.0,0.0,0.12632029366388725,0.09367976615370023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30444443651794817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173257938957728,0.24429561485897505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.087406156549097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796749943417822,0.0,0.12007287238770335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950677081035058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249548095249972,0.0,0.09608301248822043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640980686324615,0.09237290633165247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123815067590284,0.06701408680481867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33679706292524586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18437289268962168,0.0,0.0,0.10653725450791827,0.10370254847046316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220251051258571
mentalhealth,dankness98,2020/03/27,"Does anybody else get extremely anxious when discussing their mental health with a parent? I recently told my mum I was depressed during the last semester of university. She sort of naively keeps denying that I could've been going through that and thinks that I'm actually anxious instead and need to do more to connect to others on my course which I do realise I need to do to and plan on doing. I also got help for anxiety towards the end of last year and was prescribed propranolol which helped a lot and sorted much of that out. However, I was definitely depressed as I felt quite suicidal at points this past semester, although, I'm not sure I could ever tell her that from the guilt. I believe one of the biggest factors in the development of my depression was my smoking (weed) habits in the evenings which really affected my memory and ability to learn and in turn caused me to fall behind on my courses. I've spoken to her quite openly about me smoking before and she's fairly okay with it but wouldn't entirely condone it either. I've also cut out smoking in the past few weeks and don't plan on smoking anywhere near as frequently again in the foreseeable future. However, when she came into my room earlier to discuss my depression further I was overcome with anxiety and could barely speak to her. She continued to try and coax more information out of me and eventually I had to ask her if we could just discuss it some other time as I was becoming more and more anxious with each question. I could've just told her about the smoking as it is what I believe to be the prime reason (which I've since rectified), but I could barely speak. 

Has anyone else felt anxiety and panic-stricken like this when their parents try to discuss their mental health with them?",9.101944029850744,7.832482259701496,8.813833955223881,69.16373600746269,60.731343283582106,11.957089552238806,40.34048507462686,10.9516,4.483660447761194,1427,65,245,30,16,461,172,335,0.107,0.862,0.03,-0.9658,4,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,4,4,13,9,1,1,12,1,21,2,0,3,2,57,37,27,1,8,7,3,2,1,0,1,2,2,1,0,18,27,0,1,7,0,0,3,3,6,0,1,14,4,41,3,52,17,10,41,0,4,0,0,31,21,0,6,18,185,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0867722616428009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14221722095527176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040687143625017,0.3013599820104454,0.0,0.06217433570898764,0.09110817503767217,0.0,0.0,0.08312740011613268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820421287102953,0.0756636456875763,0.20036286031608289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169981690579907,0.0,0.09134445883534076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4259682252527918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063437272860083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778137455730661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14856107648688474,0.0,0.07875597246861124,0.0,0.0,0.05873025859429645,0.08043246002406937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17075265280324636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046456584793299865,0.0,0.05053480091375851,0.0,0.07111676552199082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18903379241517115,0.0,0.0,0.1192012610506333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903542427226322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496194689443842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04344140420115851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559587979511152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792191742224141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536580490016615,0.13186484300603493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06025391588606984,0.0,0.0,0.10432746140046753,0.19746838181918044,0.0,0.16976677622962524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405733600669604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960979578966477,0.18915291820526292,0.0,0.0,0.05696388307176721,0.09142369353986683,0.08779693129940654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355483803655953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726311567866287,0.0,0.08380524461339837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777192545648674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05697579959861361,0.0,0.0,0.05184947022946697,0.0,0.0,0.16993211279561735,0.0,0.12074052928275447,0.09671849917666064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132557695275388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057261015941052526
mentalhealth,sporglorg,2020/03/27,"Covid, remote work and mental health Hi everyone

COVID-19 is of course increasing the number of companies that 'go remote'. Some of the known difficulties of remote work include finding it difficult to draw the line and stop working, feeling isolated, etc. and these things can lead to conditions such as burnout and depression.

I'd love to get a discussion going on this. Do you work for a company which recognizes these risks? Are you struggling with any of these conditions already?",6.800137693631669,9.544623506024102,6.094526678141136,72.48674698795182,66.95180722891564,10.525989672977623,35.95352839931154,10.608840637214634,4.705948020654045,393,20,59,12,7,120,63,83,0.191,0.736,0.07400000000000001,-0.8796,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,6,1,5,0,2,5,0,4,2,0,1,0,11,9,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,12,9,3,6,0,1,0,1,5,1,0,1,1,38,10,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413371039824944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872116748882647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18836303586931824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24390448613826285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20897394532244346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057955723360847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998847035810556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425993181334565,0.0,0.2485806019662387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324642279224395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973821935248405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203947052652319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18284012567448274,0.0,0.2286291397932784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529228388333856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6368548324807863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jxtom,2020/03/27,"Self Harm During Anxiety Attack I am 20 F, i struggle with anxiety issues.. and lately i have gotten worse, i have started inuring myself while having an attack

I'll start by pinching my legs, then scratching them with my nails or an object (not usually anything sharp because i am usually quite aware of what i'm doing i just cant seem to stop myself) , i pull my hair, punch my legs and my head.. 

i literally don't know why i do this and if anyone else does this too or knows about it.. does it seem like its just anxiety? i'm too scared to see a psychiatrist or counselor.",3.3893236714975856,4.891782347826091,4.989855072463769,82.04642512077298,73.34782608695653,7.893719806763285,25.82125603864734,8.515128840125781,1.7970096618357485,450,15,88,8,9,152,77,115,0.198,0.764,0.038,-0.9494,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,5,6,2,2,3,0,9,4,4,0,0,17,19,9,0,1,7,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,1,4,17,1,7,18,0,9,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,6,9,56,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659615448394469,0.0,0.0,0.11149879596442697,0.16338657588179506,0.13122276556684564,0.0,0.0,0.3628196765146315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720590814583263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790906840239853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320915267191444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636529275498026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166435790711307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17527112325035424,0.0,0.17987888444107394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790455994744137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16960633670265202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964821778698465,0.0,0.12706972263681052,0.2903344992489333,0.16635253616363732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22573454625274936,0.0,0.0,0.13331648491015688,0.0,0.1667031957719035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3512473909303821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388869458066025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625043196263612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,smendozx,2020/03/27,"The Other Side Anyone else feeling overwhelmed being on the ""other"" (healing) side of  gaslighting? Undoing/recovering from 20 years worth of core beliefs planted by this complex beast of resentment/hostility has me reeling  (and in a simmer of rage)! Oof.",6.6971428571428575,9.940636095238098,6.766904761904763,65.24892857142859,69.0,8.009523809523811,39.07142857142857,8.841846274778883,4.482742857142859,204,12,25,4,4,65,36,42,0.0,0.88,0.12,0.4389,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,8,2,0,5,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,18,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4101064155408096,0.6009561126000615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4899598031259158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965606845496419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37769780296045197
mentalhealth,confused_girl047,2020/03/27,"Why do people fake mental health issues? So this girl I know has a problem faking mental disorders. Caught her over the sink making bruises on her arm. Always quoting joker and singing sad songs. She claims to have depression. Would believe her if I didn't know her for so long. What does she get from faking depression. So many people are actually suffering and she chooses to mimic them.
Anyone know why she would do this?
It really confuses me. A ton of people also do the same with anxiety. Apparently it's cute??
Idk anymore. Can anyone help me understand?",2.643328710124824,5.637949650485443,4.005499306518725,79.44905339805827,86.47572815533981,6.82635228848821,22.89112343966713,7.957251820313856,1.9626871012482656,446,16,72,10,14,146,75,103,0.26,0.6809999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.9734,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,0,4,10,0,1,4,0,10,2,1,1,0,15,17,7,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,5,3,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,9,0,0,2,1,13,1,8,13,2,4,0,4,0,0,11,2,0,2,1,49,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.16238532502909414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13307241975911036,0.13846062707679332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729784028002036,0.0,0.16502706314593954,0.23270569468692898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874791988833996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866453218122949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19071225559604787,0.0,0.1456203875223288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693869997829601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768786086801658,0.0,0.0,0.11153642392811204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736815001598752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2743522125625336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14726141946487173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107529529058294,0.16870652500381494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335390173156413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34608866635059765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592251987158971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660202341626616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323139253089265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003056520957472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364158351130967,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anweki,2020/03/27,Should I seek help? I always have this overwhelming sadness and hopelessness and can't feel happy. It has been like this for atleast 3 years and it gets worse. Should I seek professional help?,3.803571428571427,6.857132714285719,2.9939285714285724,89.18232142857146,79.0,6.928571428571428,23.035714285714285,8.07648339933343,1.39,155,5,29,3,4,45,26,35,0.303,0.519,0.17800000000000002,-0.762,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,6,8,3,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,3,2,1,5,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,17,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3442232918865442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20917413766791948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21613599570271974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4403807894829601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5545754893698985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20210807990982285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4215855405497952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664028522637685
mentalhealth,the-roof,2020/03/27,"When are experiences considered traumatic? I am a 29yo female. I have autism so I struggle a lot with social interaction and sensory processing etcetera. However, I was good at academics and persevered to get my degree. I thought that if I would achieve that, I would have proven not to be dumb. When I did get my degree, I had nothing to live for anymore. I have been severely depressed for 5 years. Now I am not severely suicidal anymore. But I struggle with the past.

My experiences from the past include bullying, being excluded, and being angry for not being understood. I was never taught to say 'no'. I now know what I felt in my childhood was anxiety, pretty much all the time. Also, there was a female classmate, we were around 11 or 12 yo and she made me undress myself when I was at her house and play sexual activities. There was no actual intercourse and she was young too. I couldn't say no. I did try to distract her from the idea but it didn't work.
There were a lot of situations of being laughed at, yelled at, being called names. 

I am in therapy now, and I struggle with insecurities, low self esteem and nightmares about the past, besides the anxiety and depression. 

My therapist say I have to change my thoughts, but they don't tell how. About my past they say it is not useful to think about it and I shouldn't do that (as if I actually do want that)
I wonder whether my past experiences, thereby considering I still struggle with it, qualify as traumatic experiences?

I hate it that my current therapists downplay my past and how I struggle with it. I now think maybe I am exaggerating?",4.122962680883472,6.285868075907594,5.389323432343236,77.18060357958873,72.86138613861384,9.149987306422947,30.795760345265297,9.661875296680813,3.2345461792333086,1269,58,231,34,26,422,150,303,0.21,0.742,0.049,-0.9935,2,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,1,0,2,2,20,15,2,7,10,0,37,0,0,4,2,52,52,27,1,7,11,0,1,0,0,3,0,5,0,1,12,18,0,0,9,1,0,0,12,12,0,0,20,6,48,3,31,22,4,28,0,3,0,0,17,8,1,6,20,184,60,5,0.0,0.0,0.16182422801110002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06630630444354757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12685798256156322,0.0,0.16445683801628005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381104836168757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466447532144758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771202937169091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282743193375713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3244232498727066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07961045297655102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663829693819758,0.0,0.0,0.06954433839141999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186041987839097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567163616133367,0.0,0.09359982581259854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04556737192140027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321459055041472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098105381904347,0.0,0.07845524175184837,0.0,0.0,0.08329826820237049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060951338112155536,0.0,0.06394839657970634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795582295211961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4749048310803973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08435335706121774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637461971034983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649739608970447,0.187338463233142,0.0,0.0,0.09319882204777596,0.0,0.08452039235558129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621523609211971,0.0,0.0,0.4333986330066482,0.0,0.09069447027580027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247049998149536,0.0,0.09481939732428843,0.19253911416321176,0.0,0.1062559003396189,0.0,0.13164892590676974,0.04834782644716352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056293170683002464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07161108384250034,0.0,0.0,0.04890483177034363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089916707787244,0.06036238732963239,0.0,0.0,0.11779946864016752,0.0,0.0,0.0533939044826135
mentalhealth,hannahm1103,2020/03/27,"Attitudes towards Mental Illness Survey Hi everyone, I'm a masters student at King's College London and was wondering if anyone had a spare few minutes while they're bored in self-isolation to fill out a survey for my dissertation. We're looking at public attitudes towards severe mental illnesses, specifically psychosis and personality disorders.

We're looking for anyone aged 18+ to complete it and it should take you around 10-15 minutes to finish. You will also be able to enter a prize draw for the chance to win either an £100 or a £50 Amazon voucher at the end.

Once you're done, if you're able to share this post or the link with your friends that would be great!

Thank you!

​

https://kclbs.eu.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_5iMzoudfhUUX8GN?fbclid=IwAR1H37zcHQZRozDLmlgyAPpKERkBaiOmclT05R9km73n3U24qHJjt13aGKs",8.985869565217392,11.411837586956525,7.320985507246371,67.15408695652174,60.81159420289856,9.288115942028986,34.08985507246377,9.642632912329526,3.588302028985508,689,28,97,13,10,205,99,138,0.077,0.754,0.16899999999999998,0.9133,0,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,4,0,4,2,7,0,0,9,0,8,2,0,0,0,15,14,9,0,4,5,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,2,5,6,18,6,2,15,0,0,2,0,9,8,0,5,4,55,9,2,0.3448292845068866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787992711838407,0.0,0.1868111928475292,0.20950266206095186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24111265340743215,0.0,0.0,0.15348558563244374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18077347207689384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976021173265356,0.0,0.0,0.17644004011048153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15270819765947707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16474957934033674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332071249119981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900877517615784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2895697515112647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34750681406965644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18361596699472088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150545815272936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16512556746966525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798660741066082,0.1947794698696204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963435370761206,0.0,0.0,0.15873623794923575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18697632480762835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224784150390939,0.0,0.20950266206095186,0.0
mentalhealth,wavecave616,2020/03/27,"Need Advice I have diagnosed ADHD, BPD, and PTSD. This quarantine was okay at first and I still have good bouts of productivity which is good. I have the option to go to work right now, but I am so terrified of coming in contact with the virus. But on the other hand I have so much anxiety about not working, and knowing the store I manage is open but I’m not there. I also don’t know if I should be working as much as possible to cushion what could possibly happen during a pandemic, It’s tearing me up inside. I can’t see my therapist in person and I missed our appt, so I’m seeing her on the fourth. I’m so anxious about it being on FaceTime and I can’t even talk to her for another week. The only thing I really want to do is numb myself out with weed and alcohol, so I wanted to obviously be better and check out some support groups/discussion pages. I found a self harm thing on reddit and instead of making me feel better and seeing good advice/tips, I got extremely triggered and I can’t get out of bed because my arms and legs feel like they’re throbbing uncontrollably now. I won’t succumb but this really really sucks and I thrive off social interaction. Any advice for everything? :/ thank you",2.7467954545454525,4.8594363916666685,4.545378787878789,81.90477272727273,76.75,7.696969696969697,23.82575757575757,8.575989854853784,1.7570416666666664,954,31,182,20,22,323,144,240,0.133,0.737,0.129,-0.6167,0,1,1,0,0,0,23.0,1,1,0,6,14,14,1,1,8,1,20,7,3,2,1,41,44,25,0,6,7,0,3,1,0,2,4,0,1,2,9,19,1,0,5,0,2,2,7,5,0,1,3,6,27,9,30,35,4,21,0,1,3,0,10,14,1,3,6,129,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466465179781854,0.2352537135001755,0.0,0.1286418605192119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626204353321438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185759677760142,0.12622132235747952,0.09208482317298933,0.1359869431310848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337811026215231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21291982822569225,0.0,0.0,0.1516052629623251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369046435207216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610784490472388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221758059610076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795050651608382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818326472526138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217281569357568,0.0859943156222141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023889984319003,0.0,0.13198250572030812,0.0,0.0,0.06288979292013548,0.0,0.06841060699720025,0.3028888513349316,0.09627308328254204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064452240136812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230742917746355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05880804468357701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08034974437289227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697564091376372,0.08925486781899379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154889948296586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510484104842814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714043753250724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070930149094185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23134159514198244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279766956392418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877644876678641,0.0,0.1255750290681007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270485825830202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961298324910938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659756858322866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675105565310707,0.0,0.11082305428438703,0.0,0.1397620388058683,0.1599406108738714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199793170103178,0.0,0.09655575812182424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628983837505635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,the_cool_racoon,2020/03/27,"Anyone who would like to voice chat with me? I've read a lot in this subreddit, haven't dared to post so far. I read a lot about mental health, I have many questions. 
If someone would like to talk about their life, feelings, disorder ... 

Pm me or leave a comment. I'm interested in your story :)",1.7560919540229882,4.049586448275863,2.8282758620689665,92.00264367816094,81.06896551724137,5.935632183908046,21.73563218390805,7.1686216300943375,0.6012666666666666,226,7,48,3,6,72,43,58,0.064,0.759,0.177,0.7783,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,0,9,6,3,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,2,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,6,3,8,4,2,4,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,5,2,28,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15536717876631725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546600773821379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235083174869437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23618786340162906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352773721288629,0.0,0.0,0.1569462012801162,0.21711107438195207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3778124345420646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22527559426145985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22392500991160927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21280586644780589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489144881541861,0.0,0.4445196096497121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18826906308551866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785956815386201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3156885470002884,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Leohond15,2020/03/27,"I'm worried about my ability to feel love Over the past decade I've suffered trauma, mostly losses due to death and other (usually more painful) losses, loss of job, and honestly, feeling like I've lost myself. I've been really suicidal and had bad anxiety for probably about half this time, but I've tried to do my best. I go to work, I try to see friends, I've worked really hard at my job to build up a business to something great (which had been doing fantastic until this goddamn coronavirus...), and I'm on some meds. And now the thing I honestly wanted most, a gf, happened recently. 

She's very sweet, always happy to see/hear from me, caring, we have some common interests, similar goals, and are sexually compatible. I enjoy spending time with her and talking to her. I feel affection for her, but I'm worried I've lot my ability to truly feel love and be loved. I've always been a super affectionate and loving person, I'd arguably say I'm known for it. But for the past few years all my emotions have been felt through glass..unless they're painful. Then they can be in technicolor. I so desperately want to feel better, I want to be able to truly feel better inside if my new gf or anyone who cares about me tries to comfort me if I'm upset. That's something that's been so difficult too. Very rarely is anyone ever able to truly comfort me, friends, family, therapists. It's like the Pirates in Pirates of the Caribbean eating and it just going straight through them. 

I don't want to lose my gf, but part of me feels like if I did, I'd just sigh and cry and not feel very different, because I can barely feel any pleasure anyway. I feel temporary contentment and calm but that's it. I want to just feel normal, and I don't want my depression chasing her away. 

Please do not suggest therapy, I cannot afford it.",5.999591646714549,6.0651541201117345,6.846839584996013,76.33781191806335,66.45810055865921,10.171002926310187,32.41074753923916,9.957137785484203,3.104998776270284,1437,55,272,30,21,479,185,358,0.115,0.537,0.348,0.9989,4,0,2,0,0,0,54.0,1,0,2,12,12,41,0,1,8,0,23,7,0,1,2,58,57,27,2,10,14,0,13,3,5,0,2,1,0,1,14,16,1,0,13,0,1,2,5,13,1,1,10,16,36,27,39,44,10,24,0,7,1,4,22,8,0,9,17,166,50,5,0.1617035336592035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345502938044563,0.0,0.0,0.05498197396935109,0.0,0.06185138032362782,0.0,0.0,0.1130668705289441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596289641382359,0.0,0.06750784812216082,0.04928648662035702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484894113005381,0.14301363482328638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16486752954113865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881186935582916,0.0,0.0,0.0696375082970815,0.0,0.0,0.08447288791556865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273154213239944,0.0,0.09094735533299854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07313505194838214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762198501439717,0.0,0.4496919089610534,0.11552103675602875,0.0776303754065986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249317489821421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189984463792086,0.0,0.0,0.08913935836144694,0.0,0.0,0.07149695039035639,0.08606820922260626,0.0724273021738697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112581734438914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16046580589219445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185002678773589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045244600131612,0.08825925439233677,0.06873728087198465,0.2918875049097917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980808622157874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808714022327777,0.0,0.0,0.07921756503748419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17206396076021482,0.0,0.0,0.08755458452929836,0.15436432001392916,0.0,0.07059664419758196,0.0,0.0887509606490021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08717187945546984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359142431770883,0.0,0.07983136571440366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429657013519971,0.0,0.0,0.1288567804993062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448728033073066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884387101388152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498558756713899,0.0,0.0,0.0924610416709984,0.0938751329385516,0.05371432127186244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429063086205253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16467912728381529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904679851122696,0.2001335253493091,0.2861308012388704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772209838369105,0.16421778770723516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052065887008961566
mentalhealth,happydoggohappylife,2020/03/27,"I don't know how to stop myself from losing control. I've never posted on reddit before, I've commented, but never posted. I'm low. It's my own fault and I can't seem to just pick myself up. 

Throughout the last 5 or 6 years I've been in and out of long lasting relationships. They always seem to find an end because of my mental state. I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and haven't found a way to cope with it. I'm now 25 and feel like I haven't made any steps since I was 16.

My relationship I'm in currently has been beyond perfect until the last 2 months. We've been together a little over a year and everything was fine. Her and I, we seem to be able to communicate and we've been very open with insecurities, anxieties, etc. We were always smiling and always happy. Always there for eachother.

Lately that hasn't been the case. I've been controlling, rude, and explosive. She's losing her patience and I can't seem to control it. I go to therapy, I go to a psychiatrist, I put in the work in the past and feel like I've fallen right back to where I am. 

The thing about this relationship that's different is shes been unbelievably patient with me and now it's like it's gone. I've pushed too much about how I feel and overstepped the boundaries. I'm unbelievably low. I just can't feel like I'm normal. I wish I could control this. I hope someone has advice, and i know you don't have answers for me, i just really need to let out how i feel, as I'm just feeling like a failure.

Thank you for reading my rant if you made it this far. I hope all of you are doing well for yourselves.",1.923392456875547,3.917279643504536,3.8678491375109663,86.34968521586592,78.84894259818729,6.929578013838808,22.762011499853816,7.941651935203635,1.1358838514764642,1266,40,266,22,31,429,162,331,0.102,0.7290000000000001,0.16899999999999998,0.9739,2,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,2,4,1,8,18,19,1,1,13,0,30,1,0,10,4,66,59,22,0,7,7,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,12,23,0,5,15,1,0,7,10,7,1,0,15,6,39,12,37,41,4,46,0,4,0,0,16,17,0,8,23,167,51,2,0.08363337983149327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172557083497159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27835868700069416,0.0,0.0,0.05687356619621154,0.0,0.06397930665646524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06430890670996882,0.0,0.050982132088311635,0.0,0.07116584634711323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3752077878866044,0.06677444848539334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488612006015048,0.0,0.08737908146639706,0.09585109894312008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407435082841833,0.0,0.09327332599765696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516428908108383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25372529846819125,0.2389908130494329,0.0,0.0,0.07643939401955936,0.0,0.0,0.09169968422380748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506155418046434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902928798700338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16613363381333118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09192543670710404,0.20451710088353367,0.09434209526353912,0.0,0.0,0.0855207972125464,0.0,0.2042952245023865,0.08382261786838227,0.0,0.07401290936188916,0.0,0.18712871888276505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15827185233417038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08428277608927749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06675536587251224,0.0,0.06148015715616537,0.0620130914303443,0.12900643672074075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194295518697657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983752436334178,0.0,0.07302544137901854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16019531895418915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407464642516031,0.0,0.0,0.08365601221183051,0.0,0.053577684675137766,0.0,0.0,0.2693728530610781,0.0,0.07142244941107144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.304546751794068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918239604011174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086229133064854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992125039398038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699837964989079,0.09564205855863823,0.0,0.055562301350671146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900629715707683,0.0,0.06638428409683891,0.0,0.0,0.07519645243365172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617425937306463,0.0,0.0,0.0608860965860735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771430916683017
mentalhealth,Warm-Garbage,2020/03/27,"Sometimes, I just wanna cry when I have to do work or study. I'm a college student in media and communication so I have to write a lot of papers, study, read, watch films/documentaries, write scripts, record stuff... But sometimes I can't. I feel so bad that my chest hurts and I end up procrastinating until I have no time left. I procrastinate staring at nothing and wandering in my head. I have studied so many exams while I was crying, or cried before writing the papers I had to write for that night.

Now I'm in that same situation. I have to read a book (which stresses me a lot, I can't focus) and then write a paper for tonight. In 15 minutes I have a meeting through Skype to write a script with my classmates, which will leave me with less time to write the paper. I just wanna cry and hit my head with the desk. I can't bring myself to do anything, I've been trying to read the book during the whole week but here I am.

And it's weird because it isn't stress. I'm slightly stressed too, but that's not it. I just feel so bad I can't think straight.

Just venting, but if you have advice I'll be so thankful.",2.4902022523557794,4.082654733624455,3.5900022983222257,90.7910985980235,75.8995633187773,5.8690875660767645,24.27970581475523,6.339386263674448,0.5199379912663753,870,28,190,6,19,281,121,229,0.141,0.8140000000000001,0.045,-0.9298,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,0,1,13,8,0,3,12,0,20,3,3,0,0,36,29,22,0,3,12,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,0,3,5,0,1,7,7,0,0,3,4,27,1,24,23,5,20,0,1,2,0,9,8,0,5,11,128,37,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11452016609178085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644029379965027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195703413158406,0.0714400912078816,0.0,0.09972306660531872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5149263810175756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379868715926187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185131451735306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405487545685969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545810311214067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240910321942443,0.12733111872205458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19926750521706335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188158502755011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997819372504207,0.0,0.11245035759573692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516757478177928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13173044359894515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23181480556632075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4027343952899901,0.0,0.13415855931049805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789606161466167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07509288518457903,0.0,0.0,0.13667298545178655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956671750488084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09400558480213646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13084239664711236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853182892756698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TherminateKai,2020/03/27,"I’m so jealous of my father. Hey.
Yeah i’m jealous of my father for some reasons..
When he was same age as me (i’m 18 years old) - he was basketball player, he played on basketball team.
And there’s me - i can’t even play on basketball team, well i tried to become a basketball player but gave up after 2 months, but my teammates they were bullying me - because i was not good and i insulted one douchebag (i hated him so much) and i was new there, even my coach said i’m weak.
But my father had lots of friends and he was playing basketball really well, why i can’t live like he used to live?? 
I have no friends, no girlfriend, no companionship, and of course i’m short my height is 5’11” (well you can say it’s average height but for me that’s short) i feel so angry and weak when i’m around tall people. My father is 6’3” well he stopped growing when he was 18, i stoped growing 2 years ago i want to be that tall too, girls in my country doesn’t like guys who are shorter than 6’0”
And now i’m struggling with anxiety, social anxiety, anger issues, jealousy - can’t even make friends. 
Do you think there’s any hope for me ? 
I wanna become a basketball player too..",1.3788375350140036,3.499745924369748,2.8539705882352955,92.26370098039213,81.35294117647058,6.151540616246499,22.521708683473392,7.333567415737692,0.7819322128851534,902,30,196,13,24,294,123,238,0.228,0.61,0.162,-0.977,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,2,1,2,20,22,5,1,2,1,19,2,0,3,0,26,35,18,0,3,5,4,1,2,4,0,2,2,0,2,4,9,0,1,3,6,0,2,8,8,4,1,10,3,29,14,20,24,4,26,0,0,0,0,31,11,0,3,15,113,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179064795873292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045223562374477,0.0,0.20350653942709526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184082445602776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810824453726628,0.2938010304172922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635580998089023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725450273791858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082925688186043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115635560097021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317020851335252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13132110750236625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211021917343171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882922515532345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12996519134913415,0.0,0.2349028048157068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308143881909558,0.0,0.0,0.08878606624709992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616833947458676,0.0,0.09777859967650067,0.0,0.0,0.12846312885378716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957296973863115,0.0,0.09013188974516234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922132780218674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521043575307008,0.13675775499490556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652419225337502,0.10577591330041428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558825555938048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120339093778266,0.0,0.1390522759619232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522826130130325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030593209628823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487904476439627,0.0,0.0,0.07845350267979427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4783724804688936,0.0,0.1200219970228252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17130981446097568
mentalhealth,toflowdown-descend,2020/03/27,"Can you really turn off your feelings I tend to disassociate when I’m down. It’s been 3 years of disassociating and being down. I used to over react and deal with problems emotionally. I now tend to respond instead of react, and think things through even keeled. But now it’s almost too even keeled. Did I overdo it this time? I don’t think I have feelings anymore",2.3118661971830967,4.964525591549297,3.826179577464792,83.43814260563381,81.8169014084507,5.803521126760564,22.959507042253517,7.1686216300943375,0.94664647887324,291,10,56,4,8,96,49,71,0.044000000000000004,0.956,0.0,-0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,3,0,14,15,5,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,8,0,11,12,0,9,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,5,41,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758702257747551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732187736372105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840250790718698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30989679218993665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639260446016474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785988954330135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636132080156268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17649028922777665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18302781643140534,0.35305442002520393,0.0,0.0,0.16064438559387914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996613814381201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379407599256233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17741089125157428
mentalhealth,Murdamonroe,2020/03/27,Anyone feeling depressed from quarantine? I’ve been feeling more anxious and depressed thinking about losing my job in the next couple months.,8.689130434782609,12.048226826086955,6.338478260869567,70.10163043478265,63.34782608695652,6.339130434782609,41.934782608695656,7.1686216300943375,3.988234782608696,119,7,13,1,2,34,21,23,0.377,0.525,0.098,-0.8588,1,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,3,3,1,3,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,8,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3346730618350555,0.0,0.2071417229368526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3277899814565242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5103115840106038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29958122489713834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939779207601822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314229078935881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364603103901877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3150604216179556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18982213738160786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jewellanne11,2020/03/27,"A question I'm struggling to answer. I work at a fast food job that is considered essential during this pandemic. They cut my hours because I complained about having to work in bad weather one day, I had 16hours on my schedule for next week and they cut it down to 0. So I'm having a hard time figuring if I should just take the hour cut and see this as an opportunity to stay at home to reduce the spread (especially since I have an immunocompromised mother at home, so this would be great), or if I should fight to keep working so that I can pay my bills. I see it as my mother's health versus my bills, so I would like to go ahead and take the week off, but I'm scared if i do I'll get fired or something, even though i have expressed my concerns of spreading the virus to my mother with my employer. I was also seeing this as an opportunity to get my mental health back in shape, since this pandemic has triggered my anxiety and has brought back my suicidal thoughts.",11.024571428571427,6.264502446153848,10.402490842490842,70.09846153846154,60.435897435897424,13.604395604395606,41.7032967032967,10.608840637214634,4.103021978021978,767,27,159,12,7,250,111,195,0.162,0.8,0.038,-0.9669,2,0,1,0,1,0,15.0,0,0,2,6,11,12,4,2,10,0,16,3,0,1,0,23,30,19,1,7,8,3,2,1,0,4,2,0,2,0,9,5,1,1,4,0,3,2,0,8,0,1,4,5,25,4,25,21,0,24,0,0,3,0,9,9,0,6,13,106,34,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711802431182113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246971667488601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059952129717641,0.11184083579403158,0.08165334861507127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863852635215836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884712726867581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16197023722543796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399644162895846,0.0,0.07612563368223188,0.0,0.0,0.14767794587745506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11999093786509495,0.0,0.0,0.2847605407512845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687211724340384,0.0,0.2638232445233418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329225441675315,0.11905897811565365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544013952885293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498789902200964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14245502757371034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09076651032010204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15005221527213827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341051365229629,0.0,0.3202172139161911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22160604394119784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311957694696826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14277055519736864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003134602876785,0.0,0.14651717590779262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20142418323410485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13160305435203534,0.1063396080075067,0.0781060517887895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148897253021888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925468276851465,0.0,0.0,0.19030537822327706,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsraininghardasfuck,2020/03/27,"Overwhelming emotion Just a few minutes ago I was taking a shower like normal and listening to music. And then all of sudden, I just get this overwhelming emotion. I don’t know how to explain it very well but it’s the type of sadness that hurts so deeply and your face sort of contorts. This came out of nowhere and happened at least three times during my fifteen minute shower. It was like a five second duration of excruciating sadness and then back to normal. I was listening to Florence + the machine if that helps. Where I’m going with this, is I’m not sure why this happened. If you have any ideas, please let me know.",3.4160330578512412,5.660566801652897,4.010743801652893,85.89975206611572,75.19834710743801,6.383471074380165,26.702479338842977,7.348242739294969,1.4470099173553717,497,19,93,6,11,157,81,121,0.153,0.748,0.099,-0.8806,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,0,7,9,0,2,5,0,7,1,1,1,2,24,20,12,0,4,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,9,8,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,5,1,3,4,2,8,4,12,15,3,11,0,5,0,0,6,3,0,3,8,65,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17011451064178595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050375054402394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14756510063185954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194911725786876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43174044568252623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026380165194942,0.0,0.1090655130565816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394065183473677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12863162076828605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20544105768543594,0.21664032423503995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21093479911715976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962385257722006,0.0,0.1875127219827533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.376057409365466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21065691885737428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18087064429503089,0.0,0.14429063394160024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190286634233383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15834387031551792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725479818926941,0.0,0.17316676200704714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WhenTiringDaysCome,2020/03/27,"I feel burn out when conversing... I began to notice this more nowadays. When I talk to people, even if I was clearly interested in the topic and enjoy the talk. For some strange reason, I start to feel an anxiety building up. I start to be afraid of speaking more. I will suddenly feel exhausted as if talking is such an extremely tiring activity. Even chatting with friends online, I notice no matter how enjoyable the conversation, my brain will start telling me it's tired and would only let me think about how tired I am and how much I wanted to rest. I loose all enthusiasm. I don't think it's connected to my physical well being. Whether I am physically tired or not, it still always happen.",4.302045454545457,6.366601477272731,5.538484848484849,76.72772727272728,72.10606060606061,8.73939393939394,29.424242424242426,9.339509955726095,2.8692787878787875,553,23,98,13,11,184,88,132,0.13699999999999998,0.715,0.14800000000000002,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,1,5,0,11,6,1,4,2,25,22,13,0,4,5,0,3,0,1,3,5,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,6,1,0,0,3,2,1,0,2,4,17,5,14,14,6,11,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,4,8,76,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429504122375075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508049984801733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533398820234013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18145079068796252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083609731055964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612447580992417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146754438328244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14046054244927006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009758620766748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127719571060861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446894272831404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522855997100103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122959678261854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29167366570235803,0.0,0.10969637015530788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33121579447743194,0.12005923803172018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760302803817611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6315033136442016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101885373933036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350369551445115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757704479126876,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idfk_haha,2020/03/27,"My story, so basic but i had to get this off my chest haha (this is very long it's ok to not read all haha) Hi, i am here to share a little about me and my mental health condition, i guess..

Let me start from the very first beginning, right when i am in my mom's womb (rn i'm 15). When my mom is having me in her belly, I already have two siblings, my oldest brother and my older sister. They're 7 (brother) and 2 (sister) at the time. My father and mother's family is already ridicule my mother to have me when my sister is only 2. My mother had been through a lot because of me, even before i was born. Nice, right.

When i came out to the world and start growing up, everyone looks so happy for me, at least that's what i thought.. I was such an energetic and happy little fella back then when i'm around 3yo, but because of that, my family slowly annoyed by me, and sometimes they told me to shut up. My siblings is getting sick of me too, especially my sister. She often gave me the side-eye and letting me down lol.

But there's one time, when I didn't stop crying because of something i can't remember, my father got mad and locked me in the bathroom with the lights off. I'm screaming and crying non-stop, banging on the door. I'm really scared i will be locked forever there. It was such an unpleasant experience that i can't get off of my head until now. Because of that, I got scared of darkness and it never get better. I sleep with the lights on, at midday i turn the lights on, and stick to the bright place. I'm not thinking there's creatures or anything, I'm just scared that i'll be locked like i was before.

So speed up to this time, some months ago i asked my mother and sister about this thing, and boy they don't even know about this. They just say that I only make this up, and even if it's true, that's definitely not true? they said im being too much, and.. yeah, never gonna share any fckn thing with them anymore.

Back to the time, as I'm growing up, I slowly lose my cheerful, energetic, and happy self. I'm being told I'm annoying and embarrassing. I'm starting to think everything that I do is wrong, so I never make my own desicion. I start to shut my mouth and close my door completely. I never give my opinion about anything, and stay silent, because.. that's what they want, right? But some people starting to tell me that I'm being such a weight and not precise. I don't have as many friends as i was, i lost confidence, and never asks for any favor from anyone.

My parents never lectured me anymore, because what i only do is shut up and do what they said. People thinking that they're really kind to me and i have such a perfect life. Everytime anyone says that, i just wanna burst into tears. I am afraid of myself. I am afraid i will fucked things up, I'm afraid what I do will be embarrassing and not enough. I'm not being pushed by anyone, I push myself.

Everybody still thinking that I am truly fine. Nothing's going on. But, no.. When I reach the age of 11, i start doubting myself. I got pulled into the world of depression. I'm starting to get stressed out because of myself. And everytime i do a wrong thing, I start to hurt myself. I began with a very light thing, I scratch my body until my skin burns. And I will get the sensation of relax, because I think that I already got 'punished' of what i did.

It only got worse. From scratch burns to permanent wounds. It's been three years since my first self harm, now it's a daily thing. I can't tell anybody about this. I've tried to give hints to my mother but she only said that i'm just making it on my head, that i'm not depressed, that i just make myself feel depressed. Ever since then i only keep everything to myself. I can't tell my siblings, because i'm pretty sure they've been through a lot too, i guess. My friends? No. I've tried. they don't care. I've stopped seeking for attention. It's useless.

These last few days, i've been thinking to end this all. I'm a mistake from the very beginning, so why would I continue if it only got worse? I have everything planned, and yeah.. maybe some weeks or months later, if God decide not to take my life yet, i'll do it myself. Nobody will notice that i'm gone, my family can sell or have my things, that means i can be useful too.. they don't have to pay for my education and my needs anymore, and they will live their best life as a perfect family without me

Thank you for reading this trash haha let's just see if i can stand any longer. I'm super tired of this life. Like fuck it im just gonna cheat and rushed to the finish line.",2.542368421052629,4.001995389596605,3.8749452452788056,89.35752681863897,75.46496815286625,6.4440943122136565,23.01044809475919,7.005888975835272,0.6584615711252657,3555,100,759,35,76,1168,333,942,0.128,0.705,0.16699999999999998,0.9912,1,0,1,0,0,2,142.0,0,1,11,10,50,60,8,10,28,7,68,19,8,5,15,122,155,64,0,9,29,17,5,2,2,9,8,6,2,3,55,42,1,3,13,3,2,9,26,30,0,5,30,18,130,30,94,105,13,110,0,7,3,3,55,39,2,17,62,497,185,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04070512747410299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15202090638577154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368110542190597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366202923604852,0.09632456469870918,0.0,0.07557615704848736,0.04087835295973693,0.08585761889707838,0.0,0.0,0.0706189755275731,0.0,0.251930526441129,0.0,0.07814872649369367,0.0,0.0481899916469143,0.040612326893776134,0.0,0.051006540178381764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05252001211154304,0.04681829122214426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048146031217633625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088147678458924,0.029614468814912982,0.0,0.1186519559980567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040671308501362274,0.047447423193337036,0.0,0.09098877421412407,0.041537083380771035,0.0,0.04387833180876167,0.1238092520007419,0.04491837066063526,0.17315638323109508,0.0,0.02321842800103905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811870804695502,0.0,0.0,0.07095503915194237,0.08490422075553729,0.14394718517133778,0.0881009029141925,0.026097277623453357,0.0,0.2203575286674334,0.0,0.10117166209535396,0.0,0.0,0.14664742641201314,0.0,0.0,0.09425391471153033,0.04881059459689936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491580901003168,0.0,0.0992025165835233,0.0,0.0,0.04081562353121124,0.0,0.04781839998607595,0.025236318331680423,0.03743076161907346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14086830412205936,0.129738036389795,0.04486818451011753,0.09204739596337742,0.04054802012371858,0.04063757341206298,0.03856106246057371,0.051372504585121465,0.05012688049236114,0.0780787349125624,0.0,0.0,0.12260727848584628,0.04655546455989434,0.046132605945735136,0.05002011841801037,0.0,0.0,0.04627635273670395,0.0,0.0,0.10756141743068667,0.07330548426434934,0.0,0.033756332798685014,0.034048946018155384,0.2124970598264541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04406128160221758,0.052279990767258616,0.0,0.0,0.03111644138981568,0.24446851234903605,0.0,0.0,0.05098849791635559,0.0,0.0,0.06367000778621137,0.0,0.04797641206626805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04671693980541016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918644427554206,0.0,0.05883479282211259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05201817601232723,0.11764576164761452,0.13104072122898852,0.07303452786738503,0.13792117619065855,0.0,0.036592131222898484,0.0,0.09580872148371873,0.0,0.0,0.07597065760936318,0.0,0.04595295755573153,0.0,0.0,0.03535130149762178,0.045415851252073716,0.0,0.2600181370232787,0.048944391464684135,0.03667160746752054,0.11517301388823915,0.05260096982991953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04327886318795853,0.0,0.0345259709224903,0.0,0.12040777403250708,0.04227677755961228,0.0,0.0,0.2135494988217016,0.1765413021985533,0.0,0.036455187803432966,0.10710480656817853,0.05277804908132165,0.0,0.08775666361752334,0.0,0.062353052868896475,0.04994755057301221,0.044856967140856525,0.0,0.0,0.03965995912696605,0.0,0.15155455937578965,0.02708468473105096,0.0,0.036834089572562685,0.05591793923706676,0.0,0.0,0.04143547246605715,0.0,0.0,0.04426504356353345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359238793731424,0.03262010474330115,0.10041217407088088,0.0,0.029570842330315487
mentalhealth,greenladygreen,2020/03/27,"QUESTION: Is mindset everything?! Do you think that is true? Is that the key? Cause everyone dealing with their own problems and some just choose a positive mindset? Obviously, disorderly thinking and personalities can make that harder or even impossible for some. So, generally (whatever that means). I am trying to keep a positive attitude while maintaining a “don’t give a crap attitude” about the things society gives themselves so much pressure about (social media, trends, the American dream and seeming perfect). My personal mindset “shift” was letting the things that matter... matter. And the things that don’t, I dust my feet and walk on. But some days are harder than hard.",6.268923444976075,9.454097008771932,6.151818181818186,69.4159090909091,70.14035087719299,9.759489633173844,34.92503987240829,10.018931242160765,4.493150877192984,545,28,79,16,11,171,79,114,0.076,0.805,0.11900000000000001,0.733,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,1,1,6,5,1,1,9,0,11,2,2,2,3,28,19,10,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,9,6,0,1,6,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,1,6,2,7,17,5,4,0,0,0,0,9,1,1,6,2,59,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953268544896372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226250083205232,0.19602669149764995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21791769170333686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12558612553899762,0.0,0.0,0.18168756754571852,0.1708861823774405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648005311328832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032870138109082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16900577236089884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19443172719643556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692038002140835,0.0,0.0,0.2071189416071281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139775277286913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33204701451313484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819389512054644,0.0,0.0,0.2130010767595976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730969334167345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19382447775242556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789630559138997,0.24366893973700798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290930402068892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jessiejww,2020/03/27,"Why do I always ask myself if I wanna die, outloud and out of nowhere? Hello there is this weird thing that I've been doing for a long time but it is strating to become more and more frequent. I just randomly keep saying ""Do you wanna die?"" Outloud and out of nowhere. 

I can just be doing whatever. And I just say that, and then start to think a lot about it, a lot. But it feels like there goes a shiver trough my body. And then I just say that. Without having the intention to do so.  And it is starting to freak me out, cause first it just happend somethimes. And right now it is starting to happen like almost every hour or so? My whole body starts to react to it 2. Like I just feel cold and I can feel my heart beating in my throat.

I'm 18 years old and I've struggled and have been diagnosed with depression, generalised anxiety disorder when I was 11, I also struggled with suicidality a year or 2 before that, cause it was the reason my parents took me to a therapist back then.  Ptsd and borderline personality disorder are 2  things I got diagnosed with just last year. So maybe this could give some insight. Normally I would talk to my psychiatrists about this. But they have been closed for a few weeks because of the pandemic. And they will be closed for idk how long and I have no way of contacting them, cause they're just closed..

I hope someone maybe understand it, cause it is freaking me out.",2.488618799304721,4.770960602888092,3.5338547934215785,87.99946918037175,78.35018050541517,6.847386014173018,23.97767081160583,7.921354282810032,1.3143553683647546,1105,38,223,19,27,355,143,277,0.142,0.8109999999999999,0.047,-0.978,1,0,1,0,0,2,32.0,0,1,3,2,20,10,0,2,10,0,27,6,4,8,0,65,44,29,3,7,15,1,3,3,0,2,2,3,0,1,19,24,0,1,7,0,0,1,2,6,0,1,7,7,28,4,29,32,7,33,0,1,0,0,14,9,0,9,25,163,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955949987911135,0.0,0.0,0.07634379813731855,0.0794350187864046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303091534103673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924744009928423,0.0,0.0,0.07340714626415487,0.0,0.058194937816988576,0.10543424422585336,0.08123418604168407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21208149947409116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39227783411580497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622150581383938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08222437310848693,0.19379112940466586,0.19815642148611104,0.0,0.21882367465615424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043387729356577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14481081275079175,0.06820063684347122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120298240988533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157929321278686,0.0,0.0,0.07635255357573667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08441990629440749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312718425097525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481887176010942,0.0940143764470072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485420310999721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781719778353935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13991899592151202,0.0,0.0,0.1689680867213881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623228621210675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19181603397137698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353600930981204,0.0,0.0,0.10017507806456186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060032405277262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335687124164888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159416645212844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815452668380864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152709257067797,0.0,0.2277542075387938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088768493269559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702841449228941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19960272573730609,0.0,0.10442386118505087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673162537635808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084290844265852,0.12684619256291954,0.06117049558487572,0.0,0.0,0.05566675346539463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060657835484598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938304636201406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577614208736758,0.07657673820839732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861428465965952,0.10658392238816744,0.0,0.09202542243022982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678160163654204,0.0,0.0,0.1844301307300766
mentalhealth,mywoodenchair,2020/03/27,"I need to know. Does anyone else feel like their family members are like identical imposters because sometimes I get hit with that random wave of paranoia and I freak out resulting in a panic attack 
.help is this normal?",4.64725,7.552801225000002,4.830000000000002,78.24500000000002,74.25,7.0,27.5,8.07648339933343,2.31075,179,7,27,3,4,56,37,40,0.235,0.604,0.16,-0.5574,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,0,5,1,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,9,7,1,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,2,5,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004622139760971,0.2937505688015485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261543543995713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747652195696147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508867290253119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394949778203117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702683790098457,0.0,0.14496045209312844,0.2048133346274891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14978511206010295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19216408528107887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15755881984614925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801271606714061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21257901731613565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2808979924697637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363721325263849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835464282681093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThorMagurowitz,2020/03/27,"It hurts to think Hey.

I've had problems before with self talk telling me I'm worthless. I'd say not as much anymore, but I'm not sure if whether what I'm about to describe is related to them in some way.

I realised for the past maybe 2 months or so, every day I get into this specific state where I literally can't think without it hurting. I like listening to music, but when I do, kind of no matter what the music is, upbeat or chill, I can't focus on the words or get myself to fill up my headspace with it. Because I get a dull aching pain. Not physical but more like mental. Like how sometimes when you have the flu, your whole body and your bones and your muscles kind of hurt just by existing, and when they move. But this is more like my mind doing the same thing. I can't watch movies. I can't reflect on things too much. I put on my headphones, put on a song, change the song with no effect. Silence is also kind of painful.

These past few days I notice every day there is a point where I can only exist on autopilot, because concentrating on any one thing is painful. This pain isn't too overwhelming, but it's regular and deep enough for me to notice, and also notice it's making me less productive and more easily overwhelmed. Handling stressors is becoming difficult.

My whole life, I came more and more to the concusion that a really important habit to do is to focus on things. Focus on emotions- if you start feeling something, focus on the emotion, discern exactly what it is, remember how it feels, think about why I'm feeling like that. I try to focus also on thoughts and ideas- when one pops into my head, I try to put it into language, define terms, evaluate it. No discrimination between things- whatever I'm feeling or thinking at the time, focus on it. It has been my belief this is how someone becomes wiser, more curious, more well rounded and more empathetic.

I feel like I'm losing that curiosity because now it hurts to practice this habit of focus.

Writing this, I had a low pain in the back of my head.

Am I just more sensitive than other people? Is this a form of exhaustion? Is it just a more stressful time in my life?

Does anyone else feel the same? Anyone know what this might be? Anyone know what I should do?",4.787322775263952,5.723716404977374,5.533375565610862,81.6327028657617,69.3393665158371,8.427269984917045,29.66546003016591,8.648137234880735,2.220721025641026,1769,66,342,28,30,576,212,442,0.196,0.7340000000000001,0.07,-0.9965,0,0,1,0,0,0,57.0,0,5,2,2,24,30,0,3,18,0,31,13,4,5,2,70,57,33,0,4,19,0,7,6,0,2,9,4,0,1,36,16,0,0,19,2,0,6,12,19,1,2,5,12,38,11,49,49,22,48,1,10,2,0,14,24,0,8,22,244,74,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16725840428737865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04741007120872514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06914070623095846,0.14624361393735386,0.07143348684957017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053608205892282816,0.0,0.1274968324128314,0.15399428966268786,0.0593241828955431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744006727109923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973787786376133,0.0,0.0,0.07375152932356564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488543523267982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610099715948765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058239755648688135,0.1568448813782587,0.0,0.07203648063723475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747945735832588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115065973941559,0.09961193066225807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092730428702784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309987445333386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985347205259563,0.07870220706951839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21779913509723967,0.07662947466915249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848660809486014,0.2043617474138096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799568833807688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046536757152441134,0.0,0.07004027513599108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025851697563945,0.07395890770885095,0.07039447485195839,0.0,0.055647585710760734,0.07409832611865058,0.10250029402557746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381204050180727,0.0,0.0,0.0944843271485344,0.0530230548468224,0.3709199599056043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133105868625713,0.04833311246824554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590526704943248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670992308241107,0.0,0.2102550573379072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044662608933007365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897597123087799,0.0,0.0,0.055441897562387314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273022058455345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05907113801179682,0.0536716890916869,0.06895207092727783,0.0,0.04934617686371428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986079094775536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06570761445436543,0.0,0.0,0.05603602620408546,0.06093588579314935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23158497345392726,0.1786878084074638,0.0,0.055347651222870525,0.08130529336719422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466677394386924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055338250204205054,0.0,0.0,0.06268411501089266,0.0,0.06290890862151098,0.15567347722879785,0.0,0.0672048709700765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Garry-T-Snail,2020/03/27,"Pretty sure my dad is a narcissist and its kinda fucked me up mentally I think Yeah so as far back as I can remember, my dad has just been a completely self absorbed dick head who thinks he’s the next best thing since sliced bread and will go through some legit narc rage every now and then for stupid fucking reasons and I dont know what to do. 

He’s not the type of narcissist who genuinely believes he’s as great as he props himself up to be either, he’s the type where when you say one tiny little thing that shatters the illusion he’s built for himself he’ll go apeshit and threaten to kill you and beat the shit out of you and blah blah blah. If I had a nickel for every time he has done this, I could probably pay off my student loans.

My mom doesn’t really have any problems with him and genuinely loves him despite his constant disrespect and mistreatment, which makes it pretty difficult for me to open up to my family about how I feel about this guy. What I do feel for him is nothing but pure hatred and disgust. I have had to put up with this guy and his behavior for so long now that whenever someone mentions his name or brings up something that reminds me of him all I can think about is killing him tbh (not like Im actually gonna do that). 

I honestly don’t know what my mom sees in him and even my friends agree with me. I constantly dread coming home from college every weekend because I know that at some point im going to have to put up with my dad, and the thought of that is fucking torture for me. I know it sounds dramatic but I feel trapped in my house whenever he’s around, and whenever he is around im constantly looking for an excuse to get out of the house for a long period of time like sleeping over at my friend’s house. 

This quarantine kinda might be really bad for me in the near future because I dont know if my dad is capable of not losing his mind being locked up in the house all day, but I dont want to stick around to find out. So in conclusion, I hate my dad and I have no way of actually getting out of this situation for a while. All I can hope is that he gets covid 19, and I know thats fucked up to say but I really dont know how else to get out of this situation. Sorry for making yall read for so long, didn’t plan on making a wall text lol.",7.733133512277565,5.071175177453032,7.963334327467938,78.59565066109953,64.44885177453028,11.796043344268815,35.335619842926725,10.181067101454742,3.1322179341882883,1806,60,399,32,21,595,220,479,0.139,0.7509999999999999,0.11,-0.9427,0,2,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,4,0,5,19,27,12,1,16,2,36,10,4,6,5,81,74,36,2,6,12,7,3,5,2,4,0,3,1,3,25,30,1,0,18,2,3,7,11,17,0,1,6,8,55,10,76,60,7,60,0,1,2,6,47,33,6,9,21,258,80,6,0.0,0.0,0.13231312518864996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04610182524342183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18105145197755385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05212892696952049,0.056604643158541225,0.0826524342069112,0.0,0.0,0.07637992752018273,0.0711449730460322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583979967058662,0.07108007235920119,0.21978168927757366,0.0,0.05412750000903824,0.0,0.0,0.043721123694041054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937616827306822,0.3178133603863893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05663267252467829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04477689016414866,0.0,0.17135654750384008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06390956813183794,0.0,0.1028351143786265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061961923974402186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475399923146364,0.2506955610785566,0.14167697840806456,0.0,0.1155856257477249,0.0,0.0,0.0747424442014569,0.0,0.13425221546268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693193050562274,0.06957556945399701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800229078574761,0.0673341260744347,0.0,0.31289784794274994,0.0,0.0,0.2196854614588396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000666795370418,0.0,0.2608022928184965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624084521502736,0.0679467798288285,0.0,0.17998503213535022,0.0569293676057225,0.07584345481515896,0.0,0.0,0.06118617507981256,0.0,0.135757828934197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831978499278897,0.07191806617156726,0.06845199121173615,0.1587975818707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209903202798082,0.0,0.0,0.06504957948387874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0459385508963588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408665978917193,0.0,0.0,0.1379404855514988,0.07309273317536613,0.06486911193209588,0.0,0.13630214935083176,0.0,0.0,0.06781172895411428,0.0,0.13029053149149428,0.06970288880071368,0.0,0.0,0.07679668752417705,0.0,0.0,0.1078240385394943,0.0,0.0,0.054022549093275966,0.0,0.07072328376270258,0.0,0.06958893353695679,0.05607938705934154,0.1524052060757706,0.06784234267235703,0.0,0.05744111350435448,0.05219065839683549,0.0,0.07588914205649824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389446127176045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007782273240357,0.1303177875444988,0.0,0.053820373588492926,0.07906173373326861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03998629381946129,0.053811231984007286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,3MuPi,2020/03/27,"What one struggle related to your mental health is the worst and what do you do to deal with it? Hey guys, I'm new to the subreddit and have been trying to help where I can. It's been great to read through people's post, not that it's good to see people struggling, but because people are reaching out and talking.

  
It's got me thinking; everyone has different experiences with their mental health and what they find most challenging to deal with. 

  
Personally, the biggest frustration is not being able to concentrate when I'm feeling depressed. It means that I'm never able to escape the way that I feel as I can't take my mind elsewhere - I hate it! I try to remind myself that it will soon pass - it always does - and that I shouldn't beat myself up about it. But, it's tough when you're in that moment.

  
How about you? What's the one struggle you find most challenging, and what do you do to ease it?",4.763081936685289,5.603701877094974,5.125824022346368,84.8811755121043,69.33519553072625,8.201303538175045,27.207169459962763,8.344100000000001,1.6635359404096834,712,22,144,10,12,226,98,179,0.152,0.762,0.086,-0.9258,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,5,2,3,7,12,2,3,5,0,16,2,0,1,1,26,27,12,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,22,10,0,0,6,1,0,1,5,8,0,2,3,3,17,4,21,21,3,14,0,1,1,0,14,5,0,2,6,102,39,3,0.2607387774863824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847777510832013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794719693329312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26881023058716075,0.1122869634923739,0.0,0.0,0.13620826352668872,0.0,0.0,0.11408713063297395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457353780153572,0.0,0.12752627811521988,0.0,0.0,0.13183736022079653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23831051894132124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934765794403452,0.1042683096482416,0.14373271133374127,0.0,0.12908619150185946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871278092598398,0.0,0.2771531277731081,0.0,0.0,0.08738385320578893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14201048343727274,0.0,0.0,0.26276336129131816,0.0,0.1316359184954843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054890961662964,0.12591156803125514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668334359737234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711451573529017,0.11383352166881334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248578369883948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040466855128113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10388752384666257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4088711740302067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980215556642638,0.10478597636710127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353544022143962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17702451457039214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348115258879297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlitZz_545,2020/03/27,"Broke up recently, my brain is damaged. Sorry if my english is trash, I'm from Uruguay.

Before this shitty COVID - 19, I had a ""girlfriend"" (something like that), she was my girl for life, we really loved each other, but, my life was always the same, when I'm going to achieve something that's very important for me and my life, the universe takes it away from my hands. And going back with this girl, she was planning to go out for work outside the country, and she would eventually left me, but not saying goodbye, just giving us a time for our future, but I knew this was not going to work, I knew her, and she cannot stand this kind of relations, the distance ones. So, after a great love story, we broke up, and I know it is impossible to come back with her, so I just had to move one.

This is the problem, I just can't forget her, she is so important for me, she filled a place in my heart, she helped me with my anxiety, with another problems I had, she was an angel, she was always worried about me and my health, we had a lot of things in common, but now, I'm all alone now, and in times like this, I just sleep and play videogames, those are my only distractions of my shitty story and my shitty life.

Sorry for the long story, but I had the need to write it here.",12.519503891050586,5.607897696498057,11.447699416342411,70.20633511673152,60.36186770428016,14.406420233463034,42.24173151750973,9.516144504307137,3.8893739299610894,976,26,210,10,8,316,128,257,0.14400000000000002,0.74,0.11599999999999999,-0.7301,0,1,2,0,0,0,47.0,5,0,0,4,14,13,0,1,13,0,20,11,4,0,1,43,36,19,0,5,12,0,1,2,1,1,5,1,0,2,14,19,0,0,3,1,0,7,4,6,0,2,13,2,43,7,30,22,4,29,1,3,0,2,26,9,0,2,14,156,57,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280266258821273,0.0,0.0,0.20571318273750536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296198565520859,0.09456422534143877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613924243047273,0.1901027773944632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10518624665187064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13799389209666146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648235071622457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858162915722716,0.28101030475673083,0.0,0.0,0.13628466053267724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13139569825000874,0.0,0.1464829585360613,0.08285573033222668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872475959897006,0.06793491650399372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430676488685436,0.0,0.34924835523525977,0.12078292595295745,0.0,0.0,0.10939433083659256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509203972046242,0.2231325771891915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13138191589306633,0.0,0.09165807287700158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675278319076255,0.0940138717995311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12915012027691794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365634411123421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919017119233339,0.0,0.12205372325131135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830266220629466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12370308115590788,0.0,0.0,0.1903278983871122,0.0,0.2767510769492439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929422002453601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212352180723179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416041190627002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869219174929596,0.0,0.0,0.1019943380971397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17998464999445996,0.1255358231341464,0.0,0.08781170307658473,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samwwich,2020/03/27,I've been hallucinating and idk how to tell my family and get help No one in my family has had any type of mental Illness and last time I tried to get help for my depression my family was in denial even after I was diagnosed and prescribed zoloft they said I was making things up just to get medication and now I've been hallucinating seeing people that are out of focus but arent really there even hearing scratching behind me to turn around and see a figure go under the bed but I cant bring myself to tell them cause they'll prob be in denial again and make me out to be some addict again even though I've never been one how am I supposed to convince someone that I need help when all they do is call me a liar make me feel ashamed for something I cant control,10.010274261603376,5.887961715189874,9.915443037974686,70.87628691983127,61.59493670886076,12.811814345991564,35.82700421940928,10.125756701596842,3.2537561181434587,613,15,126,9,6,204,95,158,0.099,0.8390000000000001,0.062,-0.705,1,0,1,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,4,1,13,4,1,1,3,0,18,5,0,7,2,26,33,13,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,1,5,2,1,0,3,10,0,1,2,0,0,2,5,3,0,2,8,6,20,1,21,22,2,18,0,1,2,0,12,8,0,1,8,91,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547526923956263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653476005432088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637069054464695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14495266560290504,0.0,0.0,0.14582763184809516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921541498376535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226625690061382,0.14408207151417826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28128125026404743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4014696679929756,0.0,0.07177707924637855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224980200398121,0.0,0.08067670920742465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999441775222786,0.0,0.2854497880980673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571286147642335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842696438256145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14300545723058974,0.14305798124951105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052583704844891,0.10948500548862364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923857445820316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841422499154376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094047165139812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13503240086903953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22624066560081765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027862411341478,0.10928445151169873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24815111910891186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430907515889507,0.0,0.13947077788655826,0.0,0.08277552412644135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963786182428916,0.15440706388396155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,everything_but_not,2020/03/27,"I'm just tired Why don't I fit anywhere? My entire life, it's been glaringly obvious to everyone around me that I just don't fit. Most people that are close to me deny it because they think it would hurt my feelings if they told me the truth. But honestly, it would just set me free to know that I'm not just insane. Because for my entire life I've known, at least to some degree, that I'm not meant to be here. I *know* that. I don't think I'm some higher being or anything, but I know I wasn't meant to be alive.

I'm incapable of having functional, long lasting relationships of any kind, I can't even talk to most people without obviously making them feel uncomfortable. It took me a while to learn that, but over the years the amount of uncomfortable, awkward interactions I've had, the amount of people who have left me, or have been with me but obviously felt stuck, and the amount of my close family members that just don't want to ever be in a conversation with me has taught me about myself.

 Once I realized this, I tried to make a presentable version of myself, but it doesn't really work, and I never feel like me. I can't really 'turn it off' though, so in almost every interaction I have with people outside of my home, I feel like I'm behind an impenetrable mask. I literally can't express any emotion except happiness when I'm out of my house, and I'm never really happy, so I'm just constantly faking it.

So yeah, I'm that one person that you start talking to and just want to leave. I tend to be more 'normal' online, but if you met me in real life you'd understand. Most of the time I avoid meeting or talking to others because it just fills me with intense anxiety and self hatred.

And it's not just my incapability to have any social interaction. It's also that my brain is fighting against me every hour of every day, and I live at the whims of whatever it's trying to do to me. I can't think freely at all. I'm constantly being policed by myself and judged. Everything I do, say, think, is scrutinized. I don't know if my emotions are completely fake or not, and a lot of them feel foreign or forced. There's certain things I'm not allowed to do or believe. I think about the same things over and over again every day. 

I am constantly being attacked by myself. I'll find something I hate, something I don't want to think about at all, and think about it constantly, then feel guilty, ashamed, or I'll end up making myself paranoid which can get very bad. Every time I think something, I'll end up hating myself for thinking it. Every time I actually feel happy or enjoy something, my brain is there to ruin it for me. And the more I fight against this, the worse it gets and the worse I feel, so most of the time I live my life tiptoeing everywhere and feeling stressed and worried.

I also hate myself. Everything about myself. The way I look, the way I talk, the way I behave. I hate that I'm a coward, that I'm weak, lazy, and fat, that I have no social skills, that I have no talents. I feel worthless, a waste. I annoy myself almost as much as I annoy others. I hate myself so goddamned much that I'm not really surprised that other people hate me too. At least that's something we have in common.

I feel very lost. I barely have a personality, and I can't really define what's me and what's the mask anymore. I have absolutely terrible memory, and I live in a brain fog, so I feel like I'm just drifting from one thing to the next. I've always felt uncomfortable and wrong in my own skin. I get really stressed out about it, I never feel right, most of the time I feel naked around others. I've never even found clothes that I'm comfortable in. I usually revert to esecapism, self harm, and alcohol to feel good. Most of the things I used to enjoy I stopped caring about. Some things I just feel too worthless and dumb to carry on doing.

I don't really have anyone that I love, I'm not even sure that I can feel it because most of the people I should love, I don't. Most of the time I think that life isn't even real. I constantly think about ending my life, and I've gotten very close, but the worst I've ever done is a few small slits in my wrist and standing on the edge of a cliff. I just don't feel like I was meant to be here. Something about me is wrong, and I feel that I'll never really be living as long as I'm like this. I'm in constant stress and pain, and I feel worn out from it. I don't see any reason to continue being alive, and although I probably won't kill myself in the short term, it's my life goal. 

Anyway, thanks for reading this far if you have, this was just a bit of a nonsensical rant about my life. I'm sure that since it's so long it's going to get mostly ignored, but I don't mind. I just wanted to put a few of my issues into words.",3.750202654232425,4.556539860772361,5.151293639406983,83.90406025824966,71.6321138211382,8.064658058345291,24.93806791009086,8.313332769828598,1.3913217838354854,3749,103,786,56,68,1259,333,984,0.23800000000000002,0.6890000000000001,0.073,-0.9995,1,1,7,0,3,1,118.0,1,4,4,4,51,60,13,6,38,1,67,20,6,6,16,184,166,66,1,12,43,0,23,5,0,4,13,1,1,4,63,42,2,3,47,1,1,5,35,35,0,2,21,26,123,26,109,130,32,91,0,5,2,2,34,39,1,27,47,531,186,5,0.0,0.0,0.03824319123289821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0418815393601724,0.07848502582533229,0.0,0.0,0.06267948160660894,0.03260871164667181,0.0,0.0,0.10660051549419984,0.0,0.029979775872552,0.0,0.038865344102756716,0.027402132493506315,0.0,0.03224952859019425,0.06977373097440252,0.0,0.044583588374698606,0.0,0.0,0.032721503477385186,0.09555795293120592,0.0,0.0,0.04415302216381814,0.0,0.0,0.04278466361532759,0.0,0.0,0.13124495892294355,0.0,0.0,0.03995619465922028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04108932951595578,0.2540988480333369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05054782862892696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040104351952836605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816557738301799,0.1041305018041966,0.0,0.0,0.10353688923426076,0.0708980932799768,0.19811250640040687,0.03744714130539432,0.07044179307444523,0.0,0.036944268865134106,0.0,0.39630665907422574,0.11198763139607963,0.07525591970347126,0.0,0.03581839223180307,0.0,0.0,0.04296914306019186,0.0,0.0,0.08189935459288182,0.0,0.02227223329981795,0.032870200772235784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251535022538509,0.0,0.2321484536864216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039310153200395936,0.0,0.0385936547764348,0.04521929407296387,0.04195305223345546,0.0,0.0,0.04090354114844241,0.0,0.0,0.04335725333812522,0.04080971877146182,0.0861498548042472,0.03194458316298356,0.0,0.041495905216223115,0.04257938660140425,0.0,0.22144499943833,0.09572978143231134,0.0,0.1384197964357127,0.1040441300618902,0.03290921726789304,0.0,0.04277984826718592,0.03331741771724918,0.07073990856313286,0.0,0.07847766585349977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039570111981719766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057617421271784174,0.0,0.15112636652078906,0.0,0.04167836056508548,0.0,0.03839728123392976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041735421052419404,0.053111489412310586,0.0,0.04170027372343256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16301393058040475,0.06843732700300928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042252790395136325,0.0,0.0,0.03939616085438862,0.0,0.0,0.039199994929121566,0.08921221030970368,0.2008458124694078,0.040293219619602735,0.0,0.04207473834356791,0.0,0.03346752469685023,0.0,0.0311649756552118,0.0,0.0,0.031228869742395124,0.0,0.08176616074026713,0.0,0.0,0.032417868151421884,0.0,0.0,0.07989729517417796,0.0,0.18101944097793188,0.0,0.0,0.027738451753115127,0.0,0.0,0.03276408459372218,0.13467394056410711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387107205441636,0.0,0.0,0.12599578796883704,0.0,0.03608032479701976,0.0,0.0,0.13017844585285038,0.2762207639041786,0.038503376428133264,0.0,0.1371098898036718,0.045042438495272084,0.0,0.03744714130539432,0.04354085394767965,0.05321404632657537,0.04262680250283433,0.0,0.04079753679042865,0.0,0.033847050067138236,0.04316157614537613,0.09700605230088856,0.09245966968445192,0.0933201403401862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035362328705996635,0.0,0.0,0.03777717321701098,0.0,0.028530342462230813,0.03979872756266135,0.0798746723433559,0.05567803612238719,0.08569489121879736,0.0,0.0252366821074484
mentalhealth,throwaway91837193,2020/03/27,"Anyone else have random phrases/words that pop up in their head? This has been going on for a while, ever since I started to get extremely depressed about 2 months ago. For obvious reasons it happens the most when I’m laying down in bed with my eyes closed but it still happens a lot; I could be showering, I could be playing a video game, I could be doing schoolwork and my it’ll happen. Usually the phrases that pop up in my head are said in the voices of my friends or parents, sometimes it’s my internal voice but I have absolutely no control over it, it sounds like it’s coming from my subconscious or maybe even another voice in my head. Am I going crazy or is this something that’s normal that I’ve just never noticed?",3.9881628787878816,5.499292854166669,4.839065656565656,83.6852272727273,71.84722222222223,7.4585858585858595,29.06313131313132,8.00094639256281,1.9624805555555551,577,23,110,8,11,187,94,144,0.062,0.867,0.071,0.3235,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,6,4,0,0,6,0,15,4,4,2,3,22,25,8,0,4,6,1,0,1,1,1,0,5,2,0,13,4,0,1,1,3,0,3,2,1,0,0,2,6,14,3,17,16,2,23,0,1,1,0,5,11,0,6,10,80,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13099035008028992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549511026878239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332513562935357,0.151409169641511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729189878126795,0.0,0.0,0.16573808913103125,0.3539500997167662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272752125538709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234439676934996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760155642363352,0.13366760973351532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416774734812975,0.0,0.07720441030703906,0.0,0.1679636814410445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3920210435617012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4549679874736672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219359772532999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562988319505425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845614245508704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179496496197118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397034388934775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478450873246484,0.0,0.16823861556887176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16408255191881665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193351769704025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14056435485905702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222379544494919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376157369642045,0.14614960384262027,0.0,0.10459329361384907,0.0,0.11801035884812315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16274922071318726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Xenofon_,2020/03/27,"Pros and cons of the quarantine I suffer from a disturb of the mood, but now I’m in a “up” phase. I feel so full of energy that I must keep myself busy, but now I’m confined at home due to the quarantine and this situation is a double-edged sword. 
I have more time to deepen my passion. I watch a lot of documentaries about ww2, ancient world and this way I’m also improving my English. I have started writing poetry again and I’m also reading a very long book, “The stand”, by Stephen King. And I’m planning to learn hieroglyphics, too. Not to mention all the work I have to do for school.
On the other hand, being confined at home is really depressing me. Sometimes, even though I’m full of energy I feel unable to focus and express myself, so that I just lay in bed. It really switch me off. It’s like the atmosphere  is oppressive and suffocating. 
I really miss having a break by going outside and just walking in the wood. It used to regenerate myself whenever I went down. And I don’t know how to replace this in order to limit the bad moments. I fear that this situation could make my mood sink.  
And it would be really annoying because I’ve just passed like 5 months of “down”.
Idk if someone could help me in some way but I just wanted to share this with somebody.",4.139912165129555,5.241727841897233,5.656093544137023,79.54568620992535,70.97628458498025,8.942380324989019,27.88954765041721,9.2995712137729,2.3551284145805877,996,35,195,21,18,338,143,253,0.10800000000000001,0.774,0.11699999999999999,0.5381,0,2,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,4,16,13,1,2,15,0,15,2,1,3,2,40,32,20,0,6,9,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,3,0,13,11,0,4,4,2,0,4,2,7,0,0,1,4,23,4,34,25,6,34,0,3,1,1,5,15,0,3,12,136,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24559003597449425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282090248701617,0.09360352262210404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24519663432491126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13225361615734518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141926711885982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17278804140225446,0.15528042696624406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726681263359203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292228252314528,0.0,0.3080491954046468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364835605695685,0.0,0.0,0.08438784670142226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500349387912799,0.0,0.0,0.13588817791658495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054392930546704,0.0,0.0,0.10249676760846707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256328136239512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535929768096211,0.0,0.3934758955033179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554022384162905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3451964673884211,0.0,0.0,0.13010362293465533,0.0,0.15186628425365065,0.0,0.10868448795859262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086349407726585,0.0,0.08953706993696704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326191287890696,0.0,0.12669600568727374,0.09056860802754373,0.2437639456681429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234370805575206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11178726517937748,0.0,0.0,0.10907852572957842,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StevieChemist216,2020/03/27,"Quarantine Depression Being stuck inside the house is really affecting my mental health. Not being able to hang out with friends or go out to bars on the weekends with them is something I really miss. Not only that but bc my job makes chemicals that go in vaccines, we are actually working more than before. I’m now working 12 hour shifts which I hate. It’s rough having to work these hours and then not having anything to look forward to. I’m going to go crazy if this lasts more than a month.",3.9496875,5.926726260416667,4.7004166666666665,82.73625000000001,72.85416666666666,7.716666666666668,25.541666666666664,8.472884824447931,1.8121291666666663,395,13,73,7,8,127,71,96,0.135,0.8440000000000001,0.021,-0.8859,1,1,1,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,1,3,1,4,1,0,3,0,7,2,0,2,0,14,18,5,0,1,6,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,6,6,1,0,0,2,0,6,3,3,0,0,1,2,6,1,14,15,2,17,0,2,1,0,3,5,0,2,8,47,12,4,0.1850239588588794,0.0,0.18055669381932865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15225895307785772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574417613304115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593608646468901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429490516425958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4206135187932252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18267285374462572,0.0,0.19667181615661106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3644226584753827,0.21349280673090867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836077295022333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508192212888139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15537352596666185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350492927288854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864606324301911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14768435872962393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071905821108074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370621717084731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14244048298233306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40409893702193617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bubbledblossom,2020/03/27,"Healthy ways to deal with emptiness Heya, I am having a hard time dealing with emptiness at the moment, and looking for tips.

The emptiness makes me uncomfortable but also makes me unproductive as no tasks feel as if they hold meaning or value at times. I sometimes eat too much food or just scroll the internet when I feel emptiness, but I am aware these are not healthy long term responses to feeling empty. 

So yeah, if people could share their tips on dealing with emptiness, it would be much appreciated!",8.657826086956522,8.667052608695656,7.36208695652174,75.05247826086959,60.95652173913044,9.53391304347826,37.96521739130435,8.841846274778883,3.302675652173913,408,18,70,5,5,123,67,92,0.21899999999999997,0.629,0.152,-0.6746,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,4,1,7,2,0,2,0,21,14,12,0,4,8,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,1,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,8,1,11,11,3,10,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,4,6,48,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538232646708495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535768608384398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5949172308290055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968233998858808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291775789526474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23259195480493314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17230898265633035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17022484706564556,0.16152664662037802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567919720225328,0.0,0.0,0.20952695481034248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828006746312013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333521717472806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902403535602224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22432317910807792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15267950828272014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13664084429670895,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kassidypaynee,2020/03/27,Is this normal? Okay so something just happened that I never thought would happen. But like it’s a good thing. But now thinking back to it my brains like “did that even actually happen?” or “are you sure that happened or did your brain just hallucinate that it happened?” And now I’m scared haha and in denial!,1.7361440677966122,4.504033355932204,2.4862500000000023,90.37310381355934,88.32203389830508,4.3059322033898315,20.934322033898304,5.985473137389443,0.22318474576271186,244,8,46,2,8,76,43,59,0.043,0.718,0.23800000000000002,0.9008,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,7,7,0,1,1,2,5,2,2,0,2,14,13,7,0,2,6,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,4,6,2,9,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,6,35,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.1668744309737225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149088592543776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817921941548185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294598410039144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14342934972278915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7560877130715059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16708702687984492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188819031706994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675468037651113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17120400959000173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316465983204356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16116846838732532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136069108063902,0.10957192952317514,0.0,0.13575741944826114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12147574896502178,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sociopathicunicorn,2020/03/27,"One of my coping mechanisms I don’t know if this will help anyone but here we go anyway. One of my more healthy-ish coping mechanisms for all the bullshit in my head is humor. Yep. I joke about it a lot. It might seem insensitive to some people but it really helps me not want to kill myself every second of the day. Joking about killing myself is better than doing it, i guess. Some people get worried, some people laugh, some people relate. It doesn’t matter. As long as I’m joking about things going on they seem less serious so they cause less stress. Maybe this is a bad idea for the long run but I’m just focusing on staying alive right now. I know that acting like my mental health is a light an casual subject helps me deal with it, so I do that. It works for some, and it doesn’t for others. It just depends on who you are, I guess. Thanks for coming to my ted talk, I hope you all had a great time.",1.6397311827956995,3.6856670591397886,3.031397849462365,91.73376344086022,80.0215053763441,5.638709677419356,16.78494623655914,6.691623216298621,-0.21936344086021453,707,12,150,7,18,230,112,186,0.11699999999999999,0.623,0.26,0.986,0,0,0,0,0,2,22.0,1,2,2,2,10,16,2,1,8,1,13,2,1,2,2,32,28,9,2,3,7,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,16,4,0,0,5,4,0,5,4,5,0,3,1,1,21,11,22,25,11,16,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,14,6,107,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340513277054446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153717242558707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814431129273754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722770349012647,0.0,0.11507090345305385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615071555957407,0.13771937692477998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255039468321516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979219675131909,0.0,0.1518378840740976,0.0,0.0,0.14727697978871174,0.2943159689387052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370958609360636,0.14199368821005534,0.0,0.0,0.2686158884020353,0.0,0.0,0.1326791869185593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508002278406276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29558210519370537,0.0,0.1468286934978647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526246048112651,0.0,0.0,0.23643551062384546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356845406790247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420321795039508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462138816910652,0.1417116564912482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810401333317345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3704416759758709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557741712510245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408012090123175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432199578089456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423829133544038,0.0,0.0,0.15302017464156406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736986716770584,0.0,0.1229863233771544,0.0,0.0,0.08874736315963809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789398303399439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879138352501856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972508408352995,0.13566117282916035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,S_Hades,2020/03/27,"Should I seek psychiatric counseling because of psychotic break that happened almost 5 years ago? Hello,

it lasted about 24 hours and it was the only occasion something like this happened.

​

Included: 

\- persecutory delusions (I was conviced, for some reason, that my friends had drugged me, were part of a drug ring and every little unrelated thing just deepened the idea. I've also believed that people on the bus somehow conspired against me, followed me just to make fun of me and mock me.)

\- visual hallucinations (seeing smoke come out of my mouth, seeing evil faceless shadowy figures at night, seeing one of my friends on TV)

\- auditory hallucinations (I've heard snippets of conversations from strangers that were pertaining me or my friends.)

\- tactile hallucinations (I constantly had a feeling someone was touching me.)

​

Besides this, I've never experienced any breaks from reality.

The only thing I've ever been diagnosed with is Asperger's. I do have a mental illness history- particularly depression, social anxiety and self-harm, I've been admitted to psychiatric hospital twice in my teens.

So, my main question is, can this happen to a person who doesn't have a psychotic disorder? I've never talked about it to anyone, but I'm afraid of eventually snapping again. My own brain betraying me like this was the scariest experience in my life. I wonder if keeping quiet about it and not seeking any psychiatric help was a mistake.

I'm 24F from Czechia, if that's relevant at all.",7.49475910931174,9.604503880769236,7.628380566801624,64.74398785425106,64.03846153846153,10.39676113360324,39.83805668016194,10.5429385540328,4.985730769230769,1219,68,175,32,19,394,161,260,0.069,0.858,0.073,-0.4136,1,0,4,0,0,0,55.0,0,0,0,0,10,11,2,1,11,0,19,7,2,2,4,33,35,11,0,4,7,0,2,2,3,1,5,3,0,1,16,8,0,1,7,1,0,2,4,5,0,2,12,9,21,6,27,22,5,22,0,1,3,0,13,8,0,8,12,120,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977387070056808,0.0,0.11040931579935456,0.0,0.0,0.08817476462637862,0.0,0.23893300936779546,0.2679555799295329,0.14996096205365894,0.0,0.08434848576779327,0.0,0.0,0.07709625290267234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721338300761594,0.0,0.0,0.12422509685936665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308646109595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497910030436027,0.0,0.11915173058701575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496664984301262,0.11191142986625753,0.0,0.0,0.12636734402957325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255732848639308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973634955464976,0.09289868164000002,0.0,0.0,0.10785529346310307,0.0,0.0,0.05575069462612117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25555946680158864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29250727166736296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390485530309117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858374507121132,0.0,0.0,0.12446995318706905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800402350070607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987649639995934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787979496110127,0.10773478949307336,0.11050933903135612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359930807437004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111599845257368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17007839191069954,0.0,0.0,0.10347140285441736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747149299555327,0.16771517344589162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940067607922725,0.0,0.07644029907565182,0.09627465073853733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351626953809852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336549265981295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26358848240313343,0.0,0.1150250734829865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239603480582423,0.09342281565929456,0.08488342166582741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862269329055772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465034940083814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957210723256702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679555799295329,0.07100373033526729
mentalhealth,hoodie_thief,2020/03/27,"Envy is a new emotion to me, and I don’t know how to handle it My situation is kinda fucked. Very fucked compared to the situations that my “friends” (they are the closest I have to friends right now) come to me with as the source of their problems and worries. But I’ve always been a very empathetic and caring person, and in turn have always been very sympathetic and supportive. I’ve always been big on the idea that pain is relative, and no matter how small someone’s issue is, if that’s the worst they’ve been through then it hurts them in a similar way that the worst pain I went through hurt me. I’m sure I acted like it was the end of the world when I went through my worst pain just like they are.

However, lately, I’ve only felt annoyed and frustrated when people come to me with their problems. Maybe it’s because I’m coming off of all of my medications for the first time in years and my emotions are very different now because of it, but whatever the cause, this is a very new and sudden emotion to me, and I feel guilty for feeling it. I don’t show it to them because I know it’s wrong to dismiss and invalidate their emotions, but honestly I’ve been getting pissed off when they come to me with their stupid and fickle issues, saying how horrible it is for them. They need to just suck it up and get the fuck over it. I don’t pity them. I envy them. I wish so much to be in their situation, that my worst problem has such a small impact on my whole life. 

And now I feel completely hypocritical and all woe-is-me, because am I in the worst situation? Fuck no, it could definitely be so much worse. I’m sure a lot of you could tell me to suck it up and get the fuck over it. And I feel guilty for being so harsh to people in my head, when I’ve always been so kind and understanding.

Sorry this is so unorganized and unprocessed. I’m just very confused and overwhelmed with my strange new emotions. I don’t even know what I’m looking for from posting this. Validation? Help understanding it? Just what do you think of this? Am I turning into an asshole? Idk. Thanks.",3.495991945107398,4.883595582338902,4.611550566825779,85.32145472852032,72.89021479713605,7.624134844868735,26.69756861575179,8.17850203761792,1.5641556682577569,1635,57,342,25,32,536,170,419,0.265,0.636,0.1,-0.9979,2,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,2,14,1,21,39,11,2,20,0,32,12,2,4,4,68,72,38,0,8,8,0,5,2,2,0,5,1,0,1,26,29,0,0,12,1,0,7,6,28,0,1,10,7,48,11,50,57,11,47,0,4,1,5,22,21,8,4,19,236,74,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191805891904042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605740258326666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714173793575975,0.06764938823693688,0.0,0.2269068424082697,0.06904583927087657,0.0,0.0,0.1051568615989075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880258979908709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3703799962742158,0.05832639905514767,0.0,0.0,0.043495425070755336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318944945933647,0.0,0.0632294101320164,0.0,0.0,0.05601470799822754,0.0,0.0,0.10175605558427504,0.3044011640963032,0.1032167549377894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675843935755157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0441400194930427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099444968110358,0.07434026002004149,0.0,0.13746728705555258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857598593546882,0.1085736083691796,0.0,0.07428529085305026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046514070741349466,0.06434510545755996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05530011204312649,0.0,0.0,0.055986045421659685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661584021511061,0.0,0.0,0.06634018240294977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681937513215362,0.04882932184971606,0.0,0.19080432585905896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050084334749188365,0.21021737986317995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130865022104062,0.05750048414081897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306917303758575,0.0,0.0,0.18903788899399748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056238282742372026,0.0,0.05236911688069637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29608707513900845,0.0,0.0,0.05579721233990045,0.0,0.0,0.07371727871010547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472944393089716,0.12413174485740773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057558609384523264,0.060628789423508835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04219607884594838,0.0,0.0,0.03839953716027318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325876761260833,0.0,0.1371110310663869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32601477679836505,0.0,0.05227121401564898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12209317349486365,0.0,0.07352275880389525,0.07572794318535672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687713279453354,0.06711004844082083,0.0,0.07200014888452608,0.0,0.0424073090763004
mentalhealth,totally_not_weird918,2020/03/27,"What is wrong with me? I am a 16 year old male.  

This past two weeks I’ve lost interest in everything I used to enjoy doing.
I no longer feel like riding ATVs, playing video games, watching tv, etc 

I’ve been pretty down as well and basically just sitting in bed all day on Instagram, I haven’t had the motivation to do much else.
I run a political page on “politigram” and I’m in a lot of group chats which is why I’m usually on there.
It is a nice way for myself to be heard and where I can give my opinions 

I am very socially isolated and lonely since I am no longer on speaking terms with one of my few friends so this seems like the only way I can get social interaction.
On an average day in the past two weeks I probably spend 7 hours a day just doing that.

According to my family I’ve also been very distant, easily aggravated, etc.

I don’t know if this kind of posting is meant for this subreddit but I thought it was worth a try.

Any advice is appreciated thank you",3.1492537313432827,4.311221437810946,5.1345074626865665,82.11758208955227,73.42786069651741,9.141094527363183,26.335323383084567,9.558583805096642,2.2042362189054723,763,26,164,19,15,264,129,201,0.064,0.7829999999999999,0.153,0.94,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,2,7,13,0,0,10,0,20,0,0,2,1,20,33,9,0,1,4,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,1,1,9,6,0,0,6,5,2,2,4,3,1,3,8,4,18,10,22,24,8,29,0,2,1,0,12,11,0,4,14,103,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197510736893386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800419123534452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09184267455721827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612997368437591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282191289664192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012461604717435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213795758223176,0.0,0.1273187262333455,0.0,0.06828834428327506,0.09648399481992642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043438888718966,0.0,0.07056115756522334,0.12955796985055432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13300290187803432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406399848076871,0.07422321591276533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196302656903813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474295190335778,0.1148197356572336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928166005873666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171849648926202,0.0,0.09151740429640597,0.10271613279986028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25785236474391565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12934626337252106,0.13740045058821898,0.1456131524094181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122949860907191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11171967417481576,0.0,0.0,0.2753450579357956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434136975375955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10721933524185506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169412204034452,0.0,0.2638600697240386,0.0,0.0,0.11664497454356836,0.14874504397728028,0.2228705993336592,0.0,0.2144022472227537,0.2166674668913493,0.0,0.12143151503626405,0.0,0.12186698467164313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14766247553188355,0.0,0.08697160125175829
mentalhealth,EggIsMyFriend,2020/03/27,"Waking up in a panic When I try to sleep lately, I'll start to doze off and then snap awake in a pure panic. I've had this problem before, but not for years. It got worse after my partner decided our marriage was over a month ago, and then worse again after I fucked up a really important friendship and now, with the US winning at covid cases, yeah...it's a problem. I don't know what I did that made it stop before. It just sort of did. Any advice?",2.72130699088146,3.763846936170218,4.2088449848024325,88.80500000000002,74.31914893617021,6.648024316109423,21.939209726443767,6.868970318607317,0.4825975683890573,348,8,75,3,7,116,70,94,0.256,0.637,0.106,-0.9455,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,2,0,0,1,4,6,1,2,6,0,5,3,2,1,1,15,10,7,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,6,0,7,1,14,4,0,20,0,0,0,1,4,7,1,1,13,49,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848100038284617,0.1676472143597245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286109583460064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3218615716352442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748422985053261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125991955923904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393772803421752,0.0,0.2133403634713912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895391452744158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15095715204463445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4437930578936313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3619326830809866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211578213375445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18926080825346472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386309987203407,0.0,0.0,0.15811632052220267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128402934334816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274931564233468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38546748521910096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178980021870725
mentalhealth,MantasKutop,2020/03/27,"My case is not very severe. But please read through. Hello. I'm a 13 year old recently returned to Australia where I am on day 6 of self-isolation.

​

I've got a problem where I keep on thinking of the future (parents dying, loved ones dying, earth and universe dying) and it makes me really sad. It's far into the future but I can't help but think about it. I'm not thinking about suicide but it does make me sad and sometimes it's hard for me to sleep at night. Please help.",1.5987878787878778,3.7797069090909123,2.9316060606060614,91.67740909090912,80.91919191919192,5.172121212121212,23.03131313131313,6.2581,0.4934113131313134,380,13,78,3,10,123,66,99,0.153,0.716,0.131,-0.3055,1,1,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,3,2,1,2,0,17,13,7,4,1,6,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,1,7,1,12,12,0,15,0,2,0,1,5,7,0,0,8,43,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637998974874619,0.18369624456572367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974964686530554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4706926584432311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229575393806214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090982181976773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542463419460424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20266111835284475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13437280219464035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644287924563014,0.0,0.2018232499499058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14186909732801326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863452199477582,0.0,0.10244124828026956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678638411459534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318932507373458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14465569051467733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121761628430855,0.0,0.09684766878549472,0.0,0.14926875880556026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15771027448114885,0.17078664672595914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15128588372962615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14951762753616835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536277908626373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29060378633405193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473661472503368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18369624456572367,0.09735284196116414
mentalhealth,KDGreyGoose,2020/03/27,"Anxiety and CoVid-19 - a new mental health book https://irishacademicpress.ie/product/coping-with-coronavirus/

we have to live with anxiety...
A book written and published in 10 days by a psychiatry professor to help everyone with whats going on. 

Buy the ebook for €1 with royalities going ro medical charities combating coronavirus. 
Audiobook expected to follow shortly.",11.183333333333335,15.432105481481486,10.255333333333333,40.773000000000025,59.0,13.949629629629635,42.28148148148148,12.340626583579946,7.613352592592593,312,17,34,13,5,99,44,54,0.032,0.858,0.11,0.6369,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,10,4,0,8,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,19,2,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4771014894177679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011059424544845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979689869462725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3544427992115811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314629983580902,0.0,0.0,0.20901452005539595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753535054978763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3141380893029629,0.3142534680812696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011694380138834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clonefan3,2020/03/27,"Getting Things off my Chest (And Hopefully off my Mind) Hey everyone, these thoughts have been eating at me for quite some time and I can't quite seem to shake them regardless of what I do so I thought I'd share them. My apologies on the length (*﹏*;)

For context, I'm 19 and from a generally small town. I'm going to school and studying secondary education with a social studies focus (high school social studies teacher), and an aspiring esports hopeful who plays Super Smash Bros., and I've experienced symptoms of severe depression and OCD for the last 6 years, and have fought suicidal thoughts for the last 4 years. I also used to be in a terribly toxic relationship where I was emotionally, mentally and slightly physically abused (thankfully have been out of it for a year plus). The reason I say symptoms is because I haven't been diagnosed or to a proper doctor to be diagnosed/find out truly what is wrong with me. I've seen counselors on my college campus, talked to close friends and whatnot, but never told my family or sought out a professional.

Anyways, recently I've just felt unmotivated and drained. I sleep in way too late and go to bed way to late (in bed by 4 AM, up by noon or 1 most days). Nothing I do gets me excited or makes me truly happy anymore and with recent quarantines for COVID-19 I've been finding myself hating myself more and more each passing day. I can't bring myself to do much schoolwork, I don't eat some days and over eat other days, I don't work out as much as I used to or should, and seem to live the routine of wake up, be unproductive, go to bed. It's hell. I hate every second of it and the only slight relief I have is some friends over Xbox and in a Discord server I run for my Smash friends, but even then I still feel useless and tired all the time.

Most people I bring up my issues to (friends, relationships, etc.) is met with dismissal, being taken advantage of and all around negativity. I've got a big heart and sadly it does thinking for me at times not so opportune. I just feel like I've got nowhere to really go with this, which lead me to here typing this out at 4 AM, trying to think of a way to wrap this up that's not so sudden and awkward. Regardless, if you got to here thanks for the time, I hope you're taking care of yourself during this rough and strange time, and that you have an awesome day, night, afternoon, etc.",7.260194503925768,6.349142809421843,7.437293897216276,76.39828203069239,64.16059957173448,10.438579586009991,34.661759457530344,9.621722640351123,3.06500720913633,1880,71,367,31,24,611,239,467,0.131,0.746,0.122,-0.5606,0,1,0,0,1,0,62.0,0,2,2,7,14,30,4,2,19,0,29,12,4,5,3,82,69,40,1,7,12,1,4,1,4,1,5,1,3,0,17,38,3,0,12,2,0,10,9,11,0,1,17,7,40,19,69,47,14,68,1,3,1,0,22,29,1,16,27,239,57,9,0.0,0.09024439876626772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060910019551970875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553632571662433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780399596375575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04643016049427856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765643670093306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24560423532387496,0.0,0.0656017685245126,0.07730700966570556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795925241448587,0.06665348587789084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23381087043603005,0.0,0.08567663459495167,0.0,0.0,0.16989071733621156,0.05030700466852709,0.0,0.06417324207239129,0.07277999276996208,0.0,0.0,0.07180264039297089,0.0,0.07702375876140663,0.05441309215610116,0.07313142073045903,0.0,0.13922890969980506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353830249963864,0.0,0.07958730930251091,0.0,0.17314784755525842,0.0,0.18275101493284326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108025224930929,0.0,0.15039655179608044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902572202681392,0.0,0.08047368878720826,0.0,0.22695043240117224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949764188329776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12417110896027125,0.17183740440140935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03721091948618268,0.0,0.06725608038843535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050841477295877915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675753563915125,0.0,0.07690606982384791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198172563789924,0.0,0.058744008110169124,0.0,0.0,0.07147674504874107,0.0,0.07308344743872704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05792776729848701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05280399818457307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620240905961514,0.0,0.0,0.048793967542774014,0.07831145797424982,0.1504097117389683,0.16354781944339256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06057035660918723,0.0,0.15416836180339727,0.0,0.13867755216000094,0.0,0.08604603705581176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622112739474499,0.15528353733849767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06082636272457585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331337425776578,0.0,0.0,0.15833152668813133,0.05726744410125925,0.0612194430452872,0.0,0.14024706219626507,0.0,0.0,0.05060138647545066,0.09760834993765466,0.0,0.1814021770238539,0.2220653887217656,0.08754175175329433,0.0,0.07277999276996208,0.0,0.051711796573783886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13156614755081508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813713651426904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05544984331892342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327569670088979,0.0,0.14714545441576948
mentalhealth,whiteblackman420,2020/03/27,"Just me being depressed I feel like dying,not you're typical I Wana kill myself bs, genuinely feel like dying fading away being no one's problem and just my ownnes and ceasing to exist l, love my brother's and sisters but idk if I can do this life stuff, feels to hard to get through sometimes and keep all going, really feel like giving up idk Reddit if this will do anything im just so sad so tired, so done with it all, a man strangled himself in my town the other day think he has the right idea because I hate life as it is",5.591848484848484,4.875324972727274,6.256363636363638,82.86121212121216,67.45454545454545,8.424242424242424,30.15151515151515,7.1686216300943375,1.6943333333333324,417,13,86,3,6,137,80,110,0.261,0.6409999999999999,0.098,-0.9694,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,2,0,3,0,9,4,0,0,2,21,20,11,2,3,6,2,5,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,6,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,1,5,10,4,9,16,2,8,0,2,0,1,7,5,0,2,5,54,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429500350571462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16320798272777146,0.0,0.0,0.1058931193622041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120297596654606,0.0,0.1496177448189938,0.0,0.180285454198822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17776751376593036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3513356832463381,0.3722992986377462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907572615942817,0.16664021633264714,0.09872443630006987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561167938905626,0.1715044686628723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960995120324888,0.1876385857284816,0.0,0.0,0.1544030562687285,0.19218640258050468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453956058954932,0.25460047715406475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15678170892882265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771163184902415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662187612175909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128424657931534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834895385557104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17180544187947738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19885848540126974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130752662344913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19965619478593788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Scoobyydoobyy,2020/03/27,"I stopped being friends with a troubled person because I was always there for them but they weren't for me I had this friend who had family issues,they didn't live with her from the start,some months she was living with her relatives and some months she was in a hostel and when she did come back home they didn't give her a lot of time or attention or love.She was bullied at school at a younger age.Growing up as a teenager,she did a lot of self-harm,cutting her wrists and her thighs,trying painless ways of suicide using pills and chemicals.Then she started taking anti-depressants daily and cried herself to sleep most of the nights.When she started opening up about all of this,I didn't know what should be done I was a kid too, but I was willing to do whatever it takes to help her.Whenever she was low and called,I was always there on the other side for her.When she got her panic attacks,I took her aside from the crowd and held her hand throughout the process and tried my best to calm her.When she was talking to random guys who I knew weren't good for her,I tried to stop her but she never listened and almost always ended up being hurt.I know I had no right to tell someone who they should talk to,but I just didn't want her to be any more hurt than she already was.She always did the opposite of what I told her.When I realised that even I can't help her,I forced her to seek counseling and therapy.I bunked school to take her for her sessions because a close person was required to be present.I did everything a 16 year old kid could have done to help,and she was never grateful for any of it.And when on some days I needed someone to talk to,she wouldn't pick up my calls or tell me she's busy and later didn't ask how I was doing.When ever she got into a relationship,she didn't tell me for a long time but only after it was over and she was hurt and needed someone to talk to.She made her boyfriends her priority over me.I couldn't keep doing this,be in a friendship that wasn't benefiting me,so I clearly told her one day that I want us to go to being normal friends,but I'll still be here if you need me for your appointments or any other serious help,and she threw away her expensive medicines and tore her appointment sheet.It pissed me off so much that she couldn't see how much I did for her,cared for her.I felt guilty for a long time and it scared me that maybe she would take her life and then I wouldn't be able to live,so whenever she came crying to me or made a puppy face,I gave in.But slowly I cut off from her.Did I do the right thing or not?",5.351115196078432,4.681837077205888,5.602955882352941,87.1895931372549,67.93382352941177,8.650392156862745,28.059803921568626,7.675431598112923,1.3611212745098036,2046,54,459,19,30,651,231,544,0.141,0.789,0.07,-0.9889,0,0,0,0,0,1,45.0,1,2,4,2,15,15,2,2,21,0,55,6,4,6,5,79,89,34,1,15,13,0,2,0,2,6,2,1,1,5,17,24,0,5,5,0,1,5,18,9,0,1,46,4,73,6,62,26,10,54,0,3,1,0,72,22,1,14,26,285,90,4,0.07422399049075773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432460484328113,0.0,0.08190801920299655,0.0,0.2470412241928693,0.0,0.0,0.15142457634840673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06938941160664916,0.0,0.06973588237042397,0.057073667113885014,0.0,0.09049251136198716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789349876374244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579099303070061,0.08489247162474177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393739556651802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05926181674579505,0.0,0.16306313652801965,0.09573666693802052,0.0,0.06392901424821094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15191382458223612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574042472724738,0.0,0.0,0.04902424569601917,0.06713984880254133,0.0,0.0,0.06670773666255786,0.0,0.0699717724686982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126667074718407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469054186518042,0.0,0.0,0.0712024150420315,0.042183204288429706,0.0622555616902709,0.11872741137206053,0.0,0.0,0.07349342006501161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19900310500553728,0.0,0.0744527143164994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23837495087232394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597369313454435,0.0,0.0,0.08158312809734758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05242659954780236,0.0,0.0,0.1966234303496492,0.13137179178310596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620516488044844,0.06699004931597638,0.14046506892672975,0.0,0.0,0.07456797483035944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848976214309552,0.0,0.10912634666502227,0.16510844538038494,0.11449223446068438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07272375143557724,0.0,0.0,0.07788559220093354,0.0,0.05029609688850965,0.05645068942932949,0.0,0.08708586038875668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961905108750832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968878823406808,0.0,0.12677376465222634,0.0,0.0,0.07431116296108115,0.15023728201275574,0.05914691060868973,0.0,0.07743180973269218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427759416901418,0.0,0.18866923883059752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576083674944224,0.0,0.059275374684956285,0.12410915916112213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118899855574907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22322881423783847,0.23863372800672716,0.1946251177311964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04931112117441727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984181724604255,0.0,0.0,0.14184840742630458,0.08246558449002349,0.15117965205758502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928232160147752,0.06410569646621253,0.0,0.0,0.08755846533746227,0.05891554880918595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052726593254310616,0.0,0.0,0.047797816346928985
mentalhealth,joethepoe,2020/03/27,"What am I supposed to do? (girlfriend with mental health issues) My girlfriend is amazing but she has serious mental health issues. She is diagnosed with general anxiety, social anxiety, depression, bpd, cptsd and probably more undiagnosed issues as well.

I have anxiety so I can understand her but only to an extent.

She does this thing where she gets upset easily, blames me for being mean to her when upon going over what I said in my head or rereading texts, nothing I said was out of line. Then she'll tell me she doesn't want to talk, delete me on Skype and whatsapp and not answer her calls but then hours later or the next morning, I'll be readded and she'll write a long apology telling me she was wrong and that she doesn't know how to not get upset but yesterday when this happened again, it felt different and today when I woke up, she didn't write me, although she did readd me on skype and whatsapp as i could see her last online.

Now it's literally over a day and she didn't write me which has me really confused. I wrote an apology despite me not having done anything wrong and she read it in the afternoon but no response. We only use Skype for each other and she has no one else added on there yet upon checking while I appeared offline because I didn't know what to think, I saw her checking several times yet she didn't reply. She even checked Skype at 2am all for about 5 seconds and then off.

I don't know what to do or if I wait it out, write her more to ask what's going on or what. I already wrote an apology that was quite long and told her she means the world to me and that I just want her to be happy. I live for her happiness as she is the most remarkable woman I've ever met with a heart of gold.",5.258876190476187,5.33857852571429,5.879142857142861,82.5971904761905,68.02857142857144,9.180952380952384,29.523809523809533,8.976282227363876,2.1795238095238103,1364,45,280,22,21,444,176,350,0.12300000000000001,0.802,0.075,-0.9368,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,0,0,1,16,11,0,3,10,0,30,5,2,2,2,61,58,36,0,4,14,0,1,0,2,2,3,2,0,1,18,20,0,1,9,2,3,3,12,7,1,2,18,5,56,4,38,34,6,43,0,1,2,0,50,17,0,8,23,205,74,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333164755432502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23569491581761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451308373725577,0.0,0.0960103347233558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06260476998329906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293466482320873,0.0,0.10486785291022424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199733547722922,0.0,0.0,0.06623279564700182,0.0,0.08845508146543732,0.10423801052366738,0.0,0.10729930413816276,0.0,0.0,0.0898731795787058,0.1050974263186289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579240214683287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783216819183703,0.09289773767428516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860779555018842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731268510448842,0.0,0.11673318650961854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081698535693236,0.218651432095798,0.0,0.0,0.10539949764142124,0.2183299087719657,0.0,0.12169961193468436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113849474498407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.321575342277688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16932317024405022,0.08371394404276154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068569649280277,0.18177196506295745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237401117760787,0.0,0.0,0.2069942387455713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922227178041956,0.0,0.0,0.09854311007716292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695919591438273,0.15621546463595534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072762204290452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923374823112247,0.2054549383368148,0.0,0.06579204297526288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19538182196995868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183834613822474,0.0,0.0,0.1160214029093725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468938760687277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254611032042773,0.17952808904881132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682291021053433,0.06580580630395669,0.0,0.0,0.05988500765096935,0.0,0.09734728560595518,0.09813394264082097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691398584014156,0.0,0.08869954698974755,0.0,0.0,0.12114986091202935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233934351772924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22457194985576756,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CrazyButNot,2020/03/27,"I have a story I want to share. I hope it's okay to post this here. It's a story from about 15 years ago about me freaking out and what it can be like to live with schizophrenia. I want to get it out for me because sometimes we feel like we want to be heard, but also I hope it might help someone feel understood or that they are not alone.

 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2PxH-Jf2dM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m2PxH-Jf2dM)",8.175600000000003,9.822811360000003,5.049333333333333,85.57800000000002,62.06666666666667,7.066666666666667,24.333333333333336,6.742157984588678,0.5255333333333332,352,7,65,2,5,94,50,75,0.024,0.695,0.281,0.9315,0,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,2,0,1,0,4,7,0,0,2,1,6,0,0,0,0,18,16,4,0,5,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,10,6,12,11,0,5,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,4,4,44,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20841717426735756,0.0,0.0,0.2435104678971507,0.0,0.18802310617891707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14332523714051934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377645989678006,0.16796774453930974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283901086841892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15759407484296814,0.0,0.0,0.4670487774435572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297327341882054,0.0,0.20761275791846925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24942214921156036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251772448250963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992140048535604,0.0,0.23253688103362036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160345741080828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15140774102994578
mentalhealth,StoriesFilm,2020/03/27,In my opinion all mental health starts with connecting to nature. I had some trouble my self with the mind - but after I found a new hobby I realized that natural surroundings makes one very happy. This is not o commercial of my channel - this is purely to inspire people to find other ways to health [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57dQ7snnrIY&feature=emb\_title](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=57dQ7snnrIY&feature=emb_title),16.43394736842105,20.496660070175444,9.220131578947367,54.339671052631594,44.78947368421053,9.910526315789477,31.793859649122812,10.125756701596842,3.582512280701754,372,10,39,6,4,93,46,57,0.028999999999999998,0.745,0.226,0.9405,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,1,2,14,6,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,6,2,9,4,2,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,29,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4889823896926637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062396021449824,0.0,0.0,0.24741308632430206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402081435783272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4797098429317564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15062282786776288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22740167463754876,0.0,0.22784172162524435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179337430137609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529059759973903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564369871276234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354016946218817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971591401025526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618451197470645,0.0,0.1791101109109821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rejectedgoth,2020/03/27,"My boyfriend just doesn’t... get it Due to the coronavirus outbreak my boyfriend has done some research and now thinks he’s a professional on the subject. This means shoving every little negative detail about what’s gonna happen to society down my throat, cause he thinks that “it’s just facts, everyone should take it seriously”. i agree, but the online school and shutdown has made my anxiety so bad. i’m at an all time low having panic attacks every day and feeling like shit and i just need to be able to pretend and hope with the little hope i have left that everything’s okay, even just for a day. 

I have told him this while crying and almost breaking down in front of him but it seems like every time i try to be positive for my own health’s sake he needs to contradict me with “facts”. don’t get me wrong, i wouldn’t break up with him, i just think our ways of thinking clashes at this specific subject and i’m basically asking reddit; 

How do i get him to understand that the way he’s speaking about this is making me feel so much worse about the situation?",4.58942857142857,5.829217180952384,5.041428571428573,83.85357142857143,70.04761904761905,8.266666666666667,27.809523809523807,8.648137234880735,1.9308952380952376,848,29,168,14,15,270,124,210,0.19,0.7040000000000001,0.105,-0.9689,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,0,0,13,12,2,1,9,1,14,3,2,4,3,41,39,13,0,6,7,0,2,2,0,3,1,1,0,0,12,10,0,0,9,1,0,1,4,7,0,0,3,3,21,5,24,31,4,23,0,1,0,0,12,11,1,5,9,105,33,3,0.12752244156544842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769530464927725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755431875329627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11921626859945772,0.14507518701809666,0.0,0.0,0.10647591209120676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310006751609293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400774140671027,0.1644828502826821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304997325674926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422736996118856,0.0,0.32232947105008786,0.12185315776996153,0.11460894778452535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289583561522801,0.09110205773454501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998756372698107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11276767392699535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355503921658654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25331711635595466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855350588648796,0.0,0.0,0.1246020470830975,0.2556219755920592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066481757287095,0.08512221997292402,0.0,0.0,0.13890932334954673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374366747078887,0.18911254917958026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962010893209593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905951896246434,0.0,0.11609164139323035,0.0,0.0,0.13089995372020632,0.0,0.14334056730041755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588100569354913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.326844925698523,0.0,0.0,0.14871872237024542,0.0,0.0,0.12185315776996153,0.0,0.08657936703002958,0.0,0.0,0.13275535899008098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024427568671684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12995626250216435,0.0,0.13942577104356418,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,curious-death-monkey,2020/03/27,"Am I a psychopath? Below I’ll outline why I could be, and why I might not be:

Pro:
- only cried once when dog died
- hate hugs, hate kissing: it’s tedious as hell and takes up my time 
- very impulsive and reckless 
- only wanna kms cause I’m numb or resentful, not cause I’m sad 
-I always feel numb and emotionless 
- parents cried at my first suicide attempt, I laughed 
- people tell me secrets
- no problems with embarrassment 
- apathetic about my dads suicide attempt
- apathetic at my friends getting mad at me 
- apathetic about rejecting people or hurting their feelings 

Con: 
- I’ve had very very strong obsessive crushes 
- supremely protective and addicted to my pet rat 
- I have never been violent 
- never been told I’m charming 
- insecure about appearance/ super jealous 
- I try to help people with their problems 
- therapist told me I was hyper empathetic (she didn’t know the extent of my apathy haha facade)
- I can get into tv shows",5.750921234454168,7.809589389221562,6.51940119760479,71.20214187010598,68.28143712574851,9.210317825886687,35.600644864117925,9.661875296680813,3.961679318286504,736,38,114,17,13,242,114,167,0.344,0.475,0.18100000000000002,-0.9871,1,0,0,0,0,2,31.0,0,0,2,5,4,26,7,3,2,1,12,5,0,2,2,26,26,9,3,4,4,2,2,0,1,1,3,0,1,0,1,8,0,1,4,2,0,1,6,17,0,1,7,2,21,9,16,15,1,12,1,3,0,2,11,6,1,4,5,66,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14150796644413471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800919384638898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26669353941102864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363972366957712,0.0,0.2851721283360355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13471838785454673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13126787475190446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104131251180031,0.0,0.0,0.1002879823732773,0.0,0.13563681021754764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563135848179121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700638937813679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13896026927495794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133811715879232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377039121264975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20022915586130285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13823941379700347,0.0,0.19744699621710315,0.0,0.0,0.1441344727983389,0.0,0.0,0.2699739170700689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484140902207075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28397392578838143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975981411519017,0.0,0.11345637898876007,0.0,0.0,0.1507150544858898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569106494467152,0.0,0.0,0.24807085836893325,0.0,0.08812991919636952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213112379528494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234259890881371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,largeloafofsourdough,2020/03/27,"T/W - Mention of self-harm, suicide, and other mental health problems. I've been suffering for several years from suicidal and harmful tendencies but recently (unrelated to Covid-19), they've been coming back stronger, every since the start of the year, I've become more hopeless but years ago my mother put a ban on my crying and ever since I have struggled immensely with expressing emotion and sharing. I've been seeing a school counsellor but every session I have has been empty talk about random things and never really anything that I've been meaning to talk about. 

Lately, I've been so desperate to self-harm and it's really taking a toll on me, especially now being home constantly I have full potential to do that at any point during the day. I have uncontrollable emotions and often have outbursts of anger and constant anxiety attacks that over time have begun to cripple me, I really don't know what to do. At this point, I want nothing but to die but something inside me doesn't want me too and I don't know what to do.

Does anyone have any recommendations?",8.098939393939393,8.183293641414146,8.116868686868688,68.92863636363636,62.080808080808076,11.038383838383837,36.18181818181819,10.637119530657019,4.037478787878787,863,36,140,19,11,280,117,198,0.214,0.72,0.066,-0.9863,0,0,1,1,0,2,23.0,0,0,0,0,8,9,2,2,6,0,21,1,0,0,2,27,30,15,3,3,5,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,9,11,0,1,3,0,0,2,4,8,0,0,6,1,13,1,21,23,2,26,0,2,1,0,6,8,0,2,16,93,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621845607885017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16297148130384906,0.0,0.09166650762346518,0.0,0.0,0.08378507557206033,0.0,0.09860652964629907,0.0,0.0,0.1363192927460287,0.0,0.09213874290384122,0.0,0.0,0.13233832421476918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321942762656998,0.0,0.25897852037965513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162315629438487,0.07727781118279453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436039611425005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486047786501672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695760837460747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838941284561578,0.2019170262808552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273693590978631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019517668652073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13170639359922798,0.0,0.13516886703890196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052556473683913,0.0,0.0,0.12075635296266285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241714339477657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497621049388773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265484679296389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465723110331005,0.0,0.12045815467888173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23029067509712536,0.0,0.1183136488718834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127023723851026,0.09548575141064873,0.0,0.2500091537942893,0.1353691925519571,0.0,0.19824249325089072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922478542253497,0.0,0.0,0.08481340920957342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252680778751106,0.0,0.2621402353425645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900941860050276,0.19262308543380646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960702274700078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987146275081475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413528748851087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23149190867481265
mentalhealth,ranchkranch,2020/03/27,"corona and family shit taking their toll I started online classes about a week ago, and have barely left the house since then. I went on a hike over the weekend, and had to go to the store yesterday for some necessities, but other than that, I've been cooped inside with the family members I live with. All my university classes have moved online, and I'm finding it incredibly hard to motivate myself to... care about anything. My classes feel unimportant and weirdly non-existent.

To add to that, my parents are getting a divorce (feel free to look at my post history to find posts about that situation) and the home I grew up in has been sold and we're moving all our belongings across the country to where I currently live and go to university (where I was born/where family is). Everything is rapidly changing and I feel like I'm losing touch with family and friends (definitely a lot of self-isolation going on there) as well as completely losing my motivation for normal life stuff.

Not knowing when this is all gonna be over with and life can resume as normal (if we interpret that as meaning corona goes away, since nothing in my life is gonna be ""normal"" again with my family and living situation completely changing) is completely ruining my mental state and I'm doing my best to cope but I feel like I'm going on a huge downward spiral right now. Really struggling to do life and feeling like a pathetic loser for not being able to just do my damn homework.",10.056901323706377,7.8165890072202195,10.026218411552346,64.29350330926594,59.649819494584854,13.421058965102286,40.05084235860409,12.00992498983062,4.838215643802647,1173,47,201,29,12,390,155,277,0.12,0.74,0.139,0.7859,2,1,0,0,1,0,31.0,2,0,1,6,11,16,2,1,12,0,20,5,1,2,3,47,44,23,0,4,6,1,7,3,1,2,4,0,2,0,8,21,0,0,12,1,3,8,2,8,1,0,6,8,22,9,41,33,6,38,0,4,1,0,6,17,2,3,13,137,30,6,0.08787916349501218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789957611301601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231706376639509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256536690872904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222376037448173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959866402239162,0.0,0.18592900523295489,0.0,0.27641889286040217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07898012566814358,0.0,0.4142232714891686,0.0,0.22217172768249407,0.18834267587977147,0.0,0.0,0.16063992673831828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789522372255599,0.0,0.04591323584742951,0.0,0.19977501516133156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872246926470162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814996621451915,0.0,0.0,0.10140075579089892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04829609001818665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548096826829283,0.0,0.2482866082885985,0.12879996100696786,0.0,0.23279673416101945,0.0,0.07379636440292027,0.1966286106629186,0.0,0.07471172221483369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572617170563816,0.0,0.0,0.08856152740312936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186803286535587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583087651359909,0.08432242748761024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757941126337256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683278931674792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05629764240949214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504832546114876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916771332587034,0.0,0.09020669847011713,0.14538910432258464,0.1975597235220156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06220132423334183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918703822970219,0.10060061729613028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607419425141059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704913641662715,0.0,0.07901392184527474,0.08146486498354052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kaptain_Kaoz,2020/03/27,"family issues / power of attorney / PTSD so about two years ago i moved back to my hometown looking for work. i reconnected with family i hadn't spoken to for years because of other family drama.  now when i get their i settle in to a tiny room and just try to work away at my job. so my mom and sister insert themselves into my life and get the whole "" you need help you need therapy. "" spiel. i've got help. it didn't help. at the end of the day some people are just to broken to be helped and i unfortunately am one of them. so that's why i generally just work bed repeat my days away.

so after being badgered and harangued for 2 two months , i finally agreed to go to ""therapy"" long story short it got loud the police came they broke my arm and nose and dragged me off. 

as usual nobody can just leave me alone. eventually i was released without charges. ( they went overboard for what was a suicidal tendencies call). my family brings out the worst in me. i look at them and see failure. mine. after all the dust settled they tried to get me to go to this program they had. i read the paperwork and it had power of attorney forms! 

My sister and the local mental health agency, were listed. I probably looked like a teakettle i was so mad. the realization that my sister was trying to basically enslave me! unlimited power of attorney, shed have control my finances, my medical decisions , my everyday autonomy. gone. because why? being a shut-in isn't good for me? you think i don't know that? but letting a PTSD stricken giant of a man wander around freely isn't safe for others! i know this too ! so for the better of all Ive been self isolating for ten years before corona!  i only leave my house for work or essentials ( and the gym i,id have killed some poor sob by now without it)

i confront her and of course no shock she tried to deny it but i know just what buttons to push to get my sister to talk. and when she admitted it i told her she was dead to me for this. i may not have much but i have my freedom and ill be damned before i let anyone ANYONE take that from me. this is where i did mess up and i threatened a child services visit. i believe the exact words were "" have fun watching cps load you son into their car from the back of a squad car.""  ( for the record i wouldn't actually have done that my nephew means more to me than life itself.) i just wanted to hurt her and i did i guess. 

My mother refused to even broach the subject . like somehow i cant possibly right when i accuse the golden child. i left town again shortly after. but it was too late , my PTSD got worse after this. i dont trust anyone. ANYONE. and when i do try to break out of this shell i get burned. every. damn. time.

at this point im just asking if i should give up or not? i started this in AITA but i guess it evolved.",1.4206084656084668,3.6958416472663167,3.183683421516754,89.06864682539684,82.26278659611992,5.8964021164021165,20.20837742504409,7.1686216300943375,0.5347401763668427,2182,61,449,30,60,725,280,567,0.165,0.7759999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.9961,4,1,0,0,0,0,70.0,0,4,8,9,30,18,5,0,24,0,42,7,2,1,3,69,76,36,3,6,19,8,0,2,0,3,5,1,2,4,26,24,0,3,7,3,2,11,13,11,0,4,23,7,85,7,73,44,9,68,0,3,5,0,42,27,3,9,31,317,111,9,0.0,0.0,0.07118477054331791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646622250834808,0.0,0.0,0.07555005359179473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040221488911576,0.0,0.0,0.06493740283226401,0.06819466026468866,0.0,0.13707033094523755,0.11218193810187503,0.0,0.08893440549419293,0.0,0.12414334154186207,0.08218515898384754,0.0,0.06451480650539647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448601884897298,0.08343078760051402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181513842605821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408826686298567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464908130091706,0.08549216528008745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460850187554236,0.0,0.0,0.0481801430875989,0.0,0.06146014865753405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750679760001727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990877420631977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905563636424826,0.06997644729057495,0.08291378233994905,0.061183641433970176,0.17502473277596767,0.0,0.1607164795305387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753818376545425,0.0,0.0,0.1955766567729529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416988668941702,0.07809019855700039,0.0,0.07879419442000997,0.07613666896491303,0.07238764632938192,0.0,0.0807039378975239,0.0,0.1202676368435168,0.0,0.08228626198690256,0.15447855663065466,0.07925603924206001,0.14918444847132958,0.1030478299848466,0.07127545903710013,0.0,0.0,0.06455491192084023,0.18376879683303785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945957564941948,0.0,0.07348541772915303,0.07351240795418354,0.0,0.0,0.08543347012764227,0.058224798907344215,0.07753005063065947,0.053623701112596914,0.1081770650482292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04943009546463874,0.055478717836132924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050571569603341485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895754545099682,0.08223565134692436,0.0,0.0,0.07864812250566851,0.0,0.2558099008865034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296573728209957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062295482918504425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581285153062027,0.0,0.07609858386369375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0516315521695744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797910811684857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05484631154726482,0.05863122929102444,0.0,0.0,0.1668402098880319,0.0,0.0,0.04674084948534779,0.0,0.0,0.04253539750145968,0.0,0.0,0.06970302622221003,0.0,0.2476277185113773,0.0,0.14251527931805286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803397100280039,0.0,0.043025439031202234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06762167008866313,0.13164483264400353,0.08144160066499563,0.0,0.14063467616242167,0.0,0.21242221856727292,0.0,0.07433820295432489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092449143323452
mentalhealth,canmydogpissonyou,2020/03/27,i hadn’t felt sad in a WHILE. this whole quarantine thing is just bringing it back. my chest feels heavy again; that’s how i know it’ll be a bad episode. and a long one. can’t even sleep (1:30 am here in tx) anyone else not feeling this quarantine?,-0.2343681318681305,2.0395860576923117,0.6956043956043985,103.30653846153848,92.26923076923076,4.509890109890111,17.043956043956047,6.1826913282559595,-0.5971736263736265,193,5,47,2,7,59,44,52,0.166,0.8340000000000001,0.0,-0.7888,0,2,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,3,0,6,2,2,1,0,8,11,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,2,3,3,0,2,7,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195874681563472,0.3217760713762759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24148111265904254,0.2622143406018076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26234418333818044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074236683324122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175810346155818,0.0,0.3015323145995795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17259084218157622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779198188587977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128049248142585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31427165963910325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20863745068110792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506198712212809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mars_attacks78,2020/03/27,"I’m sorry if this is a jumbled mess Please I really need help or something I don’t really know 
I’m 21F and the last 7 months I’ve been in absolute hell. I just left my ex whom for the past 7 months I was living with. The relationship was horribly toxic. I have MDD DID  PTSD and severe anxiety I also have a past of drug abuse. After leaving my ex and frankly right before we got together my life has completely fallen a part not that I had much going for me in the first place. I’ve never felt as low and broken and insignificant as I do now and every single thing is hitting me at once and it’s hitting really hard and really fast. I have no friends absolutely none I moved back to my mothers which her and I have an absolute horrible relationship. I don’t know who to go to or what to do or anything. I don’t know anything anymore I don’t know who I am or what I want or what I need or what will help. I’m constantly crying and my mother is sick of it. I’m so close to the edge I mean all I can think about is hurting myself or frankly just killing myself im so sad and lonely and desperate. I’m craving drugs that I can’t get so in turn that’s becoming thoughts of self harm. I’m looking for comfort in meaningless sex I don’t know I don’t feel anything but sadness and hurt and I want to feel pain true pain or I want drugs to numb it all I can’t breathe I have at least 3 panic attacks a day and I just don’t know what to do.
My dad is supportive as hell and offered to send me to a residential place but frankly with all this Covid crap I can’t really go anywhere right now
I don’t know what to do",1.2575995933080684,2.866605696275077,3.5083815509751366,89.96107311211756,79.4297994269341,7.024715777798318,23.292448470283762,7.941651935203635,1.0707867825122477,1264,42,290,22,31,435,163,349,0.23399999999999999,0.705,0.061,-0.9955,0,2,4,0,1,2,13.0,1,0,0,1,11,21,5,1,11,0,34,11,2,0,5,58,68,34,1,6,15,5,4,0,1,1,8,0,0,1,19,20,0,0,13,0,0,6,15,17,0,1,8,5,42,4,30,57,8,33,2,6,1,1,18,13,3,9,14,185,61,0,0.0,0.10695295414928267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218737802493842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06905486001296632,0.0,0.08952171316360051,0.0,0.0,0.22284889904586705,0.0,0.0,0.10269301102111453,0.0,0.06941060762488041,0.0,0.0,0.09969403973084386,0.07681151631716801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464439993858567,0.09754776272617743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915528438924448,0.05821546573211307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140470614751832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605477914209105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128454122178016,0.0,0.08667154521705688,0.0,0.0,0.07678201151888228,0.0,0.0,0.06974092083310564,0.0,0.04716136380243662,0.0,0.15390434797444685,0.0,0.072195656787042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086249953621133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100962787365545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19326776567067927,0.0,0.0975050530333892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998682936303116,0.0,0.3472629625596981,0.0735805607043257,0.0,0.09558089886993157,0.09807656980818028,0.0,0.06375903835052414,0.0,0.0,0.07970839830929809,0.0,0.07580248102025589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983284389762058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410229451821838,0.09594071941554147,0.0663574500547538,0.13386532525859976,0.06962033424616776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961325952071469,0.0,0.0,0.19210327500216168,0.10591018223969248,0.0,0.09775157072532574,0.172342257420673,0.0,0.0,0.18862193274843456,0.09908728199056713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551859451069016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28914032586555216,0.0,0.0,0.19382834473138072,0.0,0.15417695200566264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09416932947931693,0.10197727484221038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949280413512109,0.0,0.1010477630846362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102435185860174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05997012381473073,0.057840162482035835,0.0,0.07166279934286017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09818578671659088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15972741692718592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,riccochet112358,2020/03/27,"Do I have BPD? Very scared and confused to go to a doctor. I am 23 years old and have never had the courage to go to a psychiatrist until now. My friend who is a major in psychology suggested I go to see a psychiatrist because she thinks I may have BPD. But with the pandemic going on, I can't go out and I have big fears about going to the hospital during the COVID-19 outbreak. But I need to at least know that I'm not crazy for thinking I might have BPD. I thought I was just depressed, but I have noticed how overly emotional I am and how easily I react to situations to a point my friends are so used to my sudden emotional blow ups that they don't pay attention to it anymore. I remember an instance when they all went out to eat, and I wasn't able to go and even though they knew I couldn't go, they still went through with the plans and tagged me in pictures i was not in, I got so angry that I couldn't calm down for a few hours and I ignored them for days. I self harm, but I never knew why. Especially during times when fights happen, I get so sad or angry that I start harming myself, I punch myself and cut myself, i used to burn myself with bobby pins too, but I always end up feeling better right after even when i'm not mad at myself. It could be as simple as my family leaving me behind to go somewhere that leads me to feeling so angry I throw things and break things, once I had a boyfriend who didn't reply to me after a fight and I ended up throwing my week old phone and completely shattering the screen. There are times when i feel so upset that I spend almost half of my paycheck on clothes, shoes, and makeup to make me feel better. Sometimes I scare myself whe  I think about how I react about these things, but it's gone on so long that I'm used to it. I have trouble with relationships too, I always break up with boyfriends before anything starts to get serious and I tell myself it's because I'm not feeling interested in the relationship after a couple months, but I'm scared I'm just saying that so I have a reason to break up with them. I had a friend in college who I absolutely loved because that's how I am with my friendships, like I love everything about them and then after a very traumatic falling out, I tried to off myself. After that, I hated that person ever since, and I have felt nothing but hate for that person since. My family says I push them away too much and I've always felt they favored my brother, a lot of times I have felt that they take care of him more and have often left me to fend for myself when I was living away from home in college. I have a weird thing too when for example if my siblings are nice and loving, I love them and think they are the nicest people ever, but when we get into fights, all I can see them as are evil people who keep hurting me. When things start getting bad, it always feels lile the world.is against me, and when nothing is happening, I feel this constant empty feeling like I'm just passing through life without meaning.

I know it's crazy and the things I'm saying are way too by the book, but it's honestly how I've been dealing with things. I really hope someone can help me. My parents are very conservative catholic asians so they've never believed in mental health disorders and personality disorders so I've never been tested and have never been supported to get tested. I do a lot more in terms of reaction but I can't really think of it at the top of my head unless I get asked about it, but what i listed above are the main provlems I deal with.",6.360350877192983,5.503732333333336,6.795307017543857,80.09092105263156,65.94444444444447,9.523391812865496,30.891812865497073,8.611707548084741,2.1849861111111117,2800,86,572,35,38,915,296,720,0.149,0.713,0.138,-0.9178,1,0,0,0,3,1,54.0,1,0,13,5,46,44,8,6,29,0,50,10,2,13,9,122,123,68,0,6,23,2,11,2,3,2,3,3,1,4,37,38,1,3,25,1,2,18,17,24,0,1,21,17,106,20,95,96,12,99,0,3,3,4,48,33,0,10,46,416,143,8,0.05562613296238842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557015369835733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18514159496524085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0551661767108768,0.0,0.0,0.04577556777434887,0.0,0.05200292534384809,0.0,0.1045251660369758,0.0,0.04644549751846825,0.10172752305231698,0.0,0.047333742092708415,0.06267160317861907,0.0,0.09839358839097093,0.0,0.0,0.21017750154308948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05671454984257794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05832294207959639,0.06011208818656785,0.0,0.04441294083083243,0.06154925809692439,0.0,0.035874253925577776,0.11469620109784125,0.04791070681073405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275047351940995,0.05693570416807895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569194210998414,0.0,0.1251438250197576,0.09853648618736284,0.0,0.0,0.07348107239820599,0.10063404384138744,0.0,0.0,0.04999318151283562,0.0,0.10487873511576973,0.062594864568205,0.22500995363254975,0.039739320502957184,0.1602294329592767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289298370204571,0.0,0.17437415153326324,0.0,0.2845225194053625,0.0,0.044489300073975335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838001134102964,0.0,0.0,0.10983857997296152,0.057088460559158685,0.05912797814377234,0.0,0.0,0.03728502437612996,0.0,0.05579754683892954,0.05524930131153892,0.05478053593675407,0.0,0.05954892582328353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0494430628433935,0.0,0.0,0.061141335854149576,0.0,0.0,0.058900043027628524,0.060437956223503425,0.0,0.039290382771525585,0.05435223756183255,0.0,0.04911889452378794,0.049227377219392465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458269807056706,0.20081902715114544,0.0,0.037130875696395664,0.0,0.0,0.06059316615571201,0.0,0.0,0.056058058619985474,0.059010536548193736,0.0,0.0,0.044400248626313935,0.0,0.04089160815224617,0.041246072755439546,0.21451151491457496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067495496450279,0.06333072106520607,0.11674053844256635,0.059240016164357326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061766237745720265,0.0,0.0,0.07712831322558951,0.14571178110836333,0.0,0.0,0.05258467560458007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127105032849226,0.057192929204697526,0.0,0.11944329860496647,0.06301356497982857,0.0475044136138529,0.0,0.13270840080355611,0.16707438945811715,0.0,0.08865365206262138,0.0,0.058030188288588816,0.0,0.0,0.09202902402216973,0.06252610409333306,0.0,0.0,0.04713184194540735,0.0,0.05501566785633901,0.0,0.11811738965074088,0.0,0.04442310163896862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312387648621927,0.0,0.0,0.041823929230052986,0.0,0.04861969203018487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586887171365294,0.1782148995874669,0.05465239320624327,0.04416093607278917,0.0973081363916408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03776649288619599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14412935649370992,0.0,0.13769215600167034,0.0,0.04415343516217901,0.044619928545811864,0.0,0.0,0.10313196510102528,0.05019393290704845,0.0,0.0,0.0536216071525586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03582140585336982
mentalhealth,Asian-Freak-20,2020/03/27,"I need to rant and let out all the questions I have about myself Sometimes I just wonder why

Why do I keep posting videos if nobody is there to watch? If nobody subscribes? If nobody cares? 

Why do I continue to spend hours editing videos for no payoff? For what? My friends to make fun of me for my long breaks? For them to make fun of my videos? For my parents to take them down?

Why do I keep pouring my heart and soul in a project I’m fully aware is going nowhere in hopes to get big?

Why do I even try? I’ll never be famous, I’ll never get what I strive for. While I spend hours, days even slaving away to try to Make a video that will get 20 views? 

My god why do I chase after something I’ll never get? Why am I not good enough? Why can people like Jake Paul become famous? 

Why am I so pathetic? Why do I cry to Reddit, hoping for any sympathy, deep down wanting someone, one person to care?  

Why can’t I seem to pull myself away from something I know I can’t achieve?

And most importantly, why do I spend all night playing a game with my friends who make me feel like shit, while I don’t speak up? Why do I continue to do the things I know make me hate myself? Why can I not stand up for myself? 

I’m sorry for troubling you with my issues, i just needed to get this off my chest I’m sorry",0.32644768856447826,2.4190230072992733,1.9683503649635057,97.21795133819954,85.35036496350365,4.383260340632603,17.892457420924575,5.46131890053228,-0.5917022871046229,1000,24,229,5,30,325,134,274,0.10800000000000001,0.762,0.13,0.733,1,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,2,1,7,15,2,0,5,0,22,3,3,5,5,37,52,9,0,8,7,1,1,2,2,1,0,1,0,1,6,6,0,2,6,6,3,2,9,3,0,1,0,4,41,12,40,49,4,30,1,0,2,0,11,12,1,9,15,139,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043636772931519074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057681537146332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07086905460631958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13084810222305826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048607201451834,0.041383366859644125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663032024253589,0.0,0.08476536355580956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032445516071096074,0.04584198134234421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915283080433236,0.0,0.16762693515314198,0.0,0.036468431045621134,0.05382148409552634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335309801554596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603996838984929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746757658891766,0.12638607175728747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669752309888875,0.0,0.11407180272277333,0.0,0.0,0.07053064677498333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06561662752097587,0.0,0.06269896487129857,0.0,0.0,0.056787093474736164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21416482332308712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516024299203243,0.14847208366887155,0.0,0.0,0.06021778000661709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04348222882028894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125151317359342,0.0,0.0,0.04448635068622833,0.05602944947546572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06145567462553344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188339329609952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05841658235928715,0.0,0.0,0.06586803180275487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054369752470500805,0.09880007559718697,0.06346427637632161,0.14366273970290264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04824671783919756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04263069277609986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713238376211986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037848237343310165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8106291273685947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958798904455904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PeabnutBubberCookiez,2020/03/27,"Do I have Panic Disorder? I've had anxiety symptoms for a couple of years now, but I've never been diagnosed with anxiety professionally by a doctor. When I was 18 (I'm 21 now) I started getting these episodes fueled by fear, that has a trigger. During these episodes I start screaming and I feel like I'm falling. They only last about 30 seconds and I slowly start to feel okay, it only takes me about a minute or less to recover. It seems so fast that I'm not sure it could be Panic Disorder, I only recently learned of it and I'm not quite sure this could be what I'm experiencing.",1.9275141242937863,4.211431610169491,4.045000000000002,83.57620056497176,80.35593220338983,6.984180790960453,25.93502824858757,8.07648339933343,1.8115909604519769,462,19,91,9,12,158,73,118,0.244,0.71,0.046,-0.9694,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,6,8,0,3,4,1,10,3,0,1,3,18,23,7,0,2,4,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,10,4,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,3,4,9,4,10,16,1,12,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,12,57,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23668499448180585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470253398673533,0.17116887685830848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570138214055525,0.0,0.0,0.3545914766823263,0.15833855414211687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17407671508185035,0.15643852678359169,0.11051530218109057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082260342891293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609839916409532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557695856824419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931157650440265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35296127020142315,0.0,0.36300632416403134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16453890620184414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15274425772492115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408300004227751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284852092305366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29159948286291665,0.1607890291047376,0.11631261226310838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961955670938202
mentalhealth,flowwerpowwer,2020/03/27,"(vent) I don’t want the pain to be for nothing If I don’t become somehow insanely successful or beautiful or just plain enviable in any way, then all the shit that happened was for nothing.

I want to have the people who caused me pain to me see how awesome I become and regret what they did. That’s it. I don’t even want the success for the sake of being successful- it’s just to make them feel regret. But if that doesn’t happen, then i’m just sort of a pathetic person, right?
You hear stories about people rising up beyond the people who wronged them and they become better because of it. I’m not better, I’m worse. And what kind of story is that? 
All of it is in the past but it’s so hard for me to let go.
I don’t even know if this is coherent- I’m sorry y’all. I might delete this later. Just needed to vent for a second.",0.7734911616161604,2.7883582556818176,2.9062878787878823,91.64123737373741,82.92045454545455,5.502020202020201,18.868686868686872,6.691623216298621,0.08882171717171737,647,16,141,7,18,219,93,176,0.09300000000000001,0.768,0.138,0.7042,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,4,5,11,12,1,0,9,0,15,3,1,3,2,31,31,14,0,9,12,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,15,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,6,6,0,1,2,4,16,6,21,25,2,12,0,2,1,0,10,5,1,8,4,101,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434895557097127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457551085716715,0.4596871515843977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454111066566461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425257052538771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832748616089264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015185470000594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884997329811849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24537724307970266,0.0,0.12428510330925817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15637171733388178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14447788832473266,0.07624868215401641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187255057584314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261100692429892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14718277192158602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102875040189934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662523599544713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29526140691456976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13244442968577255,0.2885575932250881,0.12114369794307953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848445520379547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105589867064837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241612265550044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15530971397340354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454999366576145,0.11012651904498648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14138940843263026,0.0,0.15169201474830485,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pawpatroI,2020/03/27,I am terrified with my mortality and what comes after death. How do I cope with this. I’m 16 and have been struggling with this since I was around 11. I’ve gone to get help for it but nothing I do seems to make me any less terrified of the subject. I’ve lost countless hours of sleep because I’m in pure fear of what it would feel like to just not exist when I die. Ive tried to turn to religion for assurance but I just can’t get the notion out of my head that I will just cease to be once I die. What scares me the most is that I can’t even imagine what it would feel like to just suddenly not have any consciousness and cease to exist. I’m so fucking tired of this fear I have every single night and my inability to cope with it. I know this is probably written like shit but even as I write this I feel myself having a panic attack. I don’t want to feel like shit anymore I just want to get a good nights rest without feeling like my chest is collapsing and that I will end up as nothing.,3.4706738544474405,3.878733075471701,4.564770889487871,89.30650943396229,72.01886792452831,7.943935309973044,25.52021563342318,7.957251820313856,1.1391498652291112,780,22,180,10,14,256,108,212,0.231,0.625,0.145,-0.9767,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,11,17,4,5,5,0,21,7,5,2,2,42,43,13,4,4,11,0,5,5,0,4,1,0,0,0,16,12,0,0,9,0,0,2,6,10,0,0,5,5,24,7,30,33,4,13,0,1,0,1,2,4,3,2,12,119,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15746264516517589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11481820438303272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306475715748843,0.0,0.1317113660077451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057568139028259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973035758454063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403134188788451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254274525441087,0.0,0.0,0.1529372759167153,0.0,0.09754586755823663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605592912841244,0.29269790368788856,0.3308402137392828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070326011230707,0.1814637896223525,0.0,0.0,0.09710701185095627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11881908305423335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760188949981714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140155643622512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06362719708804174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828103510669432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263826546557832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772810575032866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21729496222594488,0.0,0.2221794646596002,0.0,0.0,0.12329714852746468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13583762554251108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482559039013105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159114910603684,0.0,0.0,0.10539768367195906,0.0,0.0,0.2376838116732995,0.0957707051616752,0.0,0.11585913003429192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103370932854307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306692706455428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860397724794009,0.12593051817643494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657480071383316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160346822032484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16448721293304305,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DLROWDETREVNIHO,2020/03/27,"Anyone feel it's hard to keep truckin' on when everyone's so shallow? throwaway cause this is kinda embarrassing lol. lately i've been realizing that a lot of the people I meet or have met recently kind of feel really dull, like they're just NPCs with nothing interesting going on about them which I know is kind of a shitty thing to say but it's true. I'll have a conversation with someone and there's something missing that I can't really pinpoint, it's almost like they're immature but in an emotional way if that makes sense? I've met people in the past who almost radiate what im trying to describe, the way the think and feel and relate to the world around them is just different and they know exactly what to say and how to say it. It's not really a romantic kind of attraction but just attraction in general, I'm invested in their stories and the things they have to say and I want to be a part of their life, but with most people it's just kind of like we meet and we're friendly when we see each other and talk through social medias and stuff but we don't really connect at all. I don't know if im messed up or what, I dont think I'm of higher intelligence or anything I just have no interest in anything they have to say because I don't care. it sucks because there are so many things i want to experience but it's hard to want to make memories and stay afloat with people when everyone else's souls are puddles instead of lakes. sorry if this is pretentious or shitty i dont know how to word it without coming across that way, i just wanted to know if anyone feels the way I do.",4.00016354208217,4.990214446483184,5.291174046004521,82.45021938571999,71.20183486238533,8.867384656295705,27.06142800159553,9.20300075937882,2.0965514958117266,1272,42,261,26,23,425,149,327,0.098,0.769,0.133,0.9292,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,3,0,7,0,18,19,1,1,13,1,20,1,0,5,3,75,48,32,0,8,22,0,6,3,1,0,1,5,0,0,25,21,0,1,12,0,1,2,9,5,0,0,3,12,22,14,40,44,5,25,1,2,1,0,24,12,1,13,9,168,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17109775753488385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947357784520052,0.0,0.14060827438903375,0.0760535451127374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415841295344376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710470862345479,0.08776329645460314,0.0,0.07359302499568543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925937458935912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20025384340392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136836740604245,0.09610070471005533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16326991897037485,0.0,0.08356993572598352,0.0,0.0,0.172790108560698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600537791277275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04855358245499417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530624998093063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18456475185566334,0.0,0.0,0.07593683797859788,0.0,0.3558615822063054,0.23475890486687195,0.0,0.09637222409933012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06034390385742646,0.1252148477506373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263214095082078,0.0,0.0,0.11405447517244192,0.08661572367257032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197533475382092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251568935736604,0.08155553221482552,0.2369141346896443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21892244897940694,0.0,0.08435484984725834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3396990312587064,0.0,0.0,0.06807909568844396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708825596762597,0.07238716292268506,0.0657705511249801,0.0,0.09563532729375253,0.0,0.09106028532855033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780042540287434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866786547374322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027380647896753,0.10948412316777684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058003446517920026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20156255258974207,0.2712511773575871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235443073971987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RockleeEV,2020/03/27,"It's been two months since I was dumped and I just can't reset mentally at all We only knew each other a shade under eight months. We were in a relationship for around five of them. And yet in that short span she became the best friend I've had in my 31 years, and the object of my affection.

When she called it off, I understood why she had to from her perspective. Her own mental health was declining between outside stresses and the stresses of a relationship. I had to accept a breakup that completely blindsided me.

For the last two months, I wake up every morning with a persistent headache and thoughts of her. In the daytime I've begun writing unsent letters to her instead of the things I actually need to do. I've had acute insomnia since the day it ended. 

I freaking just want her to be happy, and if us being apart is the road to that, then I don't to force us back together. I can't call her because she needs space more than anything. But I want to hear her voice make sarcastic jokes. 

It's more than just the pain of a breakup - everyone goes through those. It's become an obsession that dominates my thoughts 24/7. She's in my dreams. I'm worried about the elders her family during the COVID-19 crisis because I know just how fragile a person she really is, but I shouldn't be doing this; she needs space not reminders of our relationship. Friendship's not looking like an option from her side because she took the breakup hard too. 

It's not even about dating. I've got too many other priorities I need to be focusing on right now, but every single day is groundhog day where I just pine for her nonstop, and lament the fact that we're probably really, truly over. 

The real problem is that I can't focus on anything. I can't compartmentalize this at all. I sit down to work on my current project and it doesn't even take ten seconds before my mind wanders back to great memories of her. I already have ADHD and my hyperfocus is on a person who isn't even in my life.

Help me.",4.5596892039258465,5.775176389312983,5.286982006543077,82.15668893129772,70.0941475826972,8.362377317339151,29.30288985823337,8.738905477910976,2.2185653217012,1583,60,308,27,28,513,204,393,0.076,0.8420000000000001,0.08199999999999999,0.4981,1,0,0,1,0,0,37.0,5,0,1,3,21,14,1,3,24,0,28,5,1,3,3,50,46,16,0,9,12,0,2,1,1,1,4,2,0,2,20,14,0,0,6,2,0,1,11,7,0,6,14,5,53,7,49,27,8,47,0,0,1,0,38,27,0,2,19,223,73,2,0.0,0.0,0.09205315078127176,0.0,0.11336716394549536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409626741888928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525224868704604,0.08397431766145809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14506896326571864,0.0,0.1725093480553795,0.10418084124609188,0.08026847351070565,0.0,0.09899424447572057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19264437243718255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989039388057102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825064831321558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354899677989706,0.0,0.0,0.18691360283055575,0.0,0.15895535767636007,0.09013702135682927,0.0,0.0,0.08892658386260684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287966082311488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544487392320152,0.10399992405935106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041677871159957,0.08450177412499664,0.0,0.0,0.10026911749506688,0.1063175488119918,0.0,0.06322787633438416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0518416829141212,0.0768921064311544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662855944380351,0.046085212663247305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921402585903946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296647128443633,0.09563651876287532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19012630713146375,0.0,0.09524711111324828,0.0,0.2258815819220241,0.0,0.0,0.2797800598064818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174274411706404,0.10037451010054044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16473184843046862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170444358281117,0.09026173530733976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736898232626027,0.12086131715865372,0.0,0.0,0.30382759188970754,0.0,0.08055789796498153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15606265108875822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21611098441999765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092494290734075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06266912210116789,0.0,0.0,0.14977606969775986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480487282513164,0.0,0.0,0.1842947641127327,0.0,0.2269364224807592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127737566168093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08511877987707643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06867386930455231,0.0957973995140044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06074587471292249
mentalhealth,A-Rad-Scorpion,2020/03/27,"I'm scared of what my doctor might do The past year I've opened up a little to my doctor about my anxiety and depression. She doesn't really know how bad it is cause I'm too scared of what will happen if she sees my cuts and I tell her about my suicidal thoughts. She referred me to a psychologist who I just straight up lied to cause I got scared of being involuntarily hospitalized. Then my last visit to her she had me fill out some paper asking questions like how often I drink alcohol, if I think about harming myself, etc. I kinda told the truth on it and we didn't discuss it further. I have an appointment in another month and I have a feeling she's going to ask more about my answers in depth.",3.4488811188811184,4.867005636363637,4.910769230769231,83.0092307692308,73.05594405594404,7.997202797202798,25.58741258741259,8.575989854853784,1.6774811188811194,558,18,114,10,11,187,92,143,0.204,0.743,0.053,-0.9745,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,0,9,9,1,3,6,0,10,4,0,4,1,26,23,9,1,2,3,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,7,2,0,7,1,0,3,2,7,0,0,5,2,26,2,18,15,3,19,0,1,1,0,16,11,0,7,6,81,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16708327926711875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393942351113758,0.11960208103627387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29231947903675465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13053999893688345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3212149614006638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465812512077532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200476756058594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315676553758178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436393855273602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07905179370804903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885341449208342,0.0,0.125041898454207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382537303078946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592210595038473,0.12744053325719285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638136539195857,0.15669690809245107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16585537436008893,0.0,0.0,0.12479160991163245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924722629320605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17514010766313715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015742462886183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46958029922213107,0.0,0.1245852479177738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17101402945934616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366508033078606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017837700385973,0.0,0.1241189965873746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14939257878458986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067986202876147
mentalhealth,AshLP1,2020/03/27,All my emotions are building up inside ma an I don’t know what to do about it I don’t speak to my family much due to them working. I’m not at school because of the virus. I can feel all my frustration building up inside me but it won’t come out. I can’t cry. I can’t scream. I feel so empty yet overwhelmed at the same time.,-1.1152663622526615,0.8490169863013719,1.4747031963470327,98.9364687975647,91.46575342465755,4.3403348554033485,17.700152207001523,5.82211442006289,-0.522246879756469,252,7,62,2,9,86,48,73,0.177,0.799,0.024,-0.8932,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,3,3,1,1,3,0,8,0,0,0,2,10,13,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,0,4,11,0,10,12,4,9,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,43,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21244354938297744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002035648700171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3828130192890784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3920177780730015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285366153759471,0.0,0.35242610673525065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915275534064484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561890267800994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3527025712963958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20321428516696985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537135646742741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MagicMonkey667,2020/03/27,"my parents split but it stills tortures me About a year ago my parents split up and it was horrible. He was a horrible person, hurt me a few times. Sometimes all I feel is that it’s my fault for not telling my mom about him. I just can’t even sleep without going back to that horrible night. I couldn’t handle the pressure, I’d been sleeping and was woken up to yelling, just, everything nasty. I just don’t know what to do since it’s been a year...",2.9893087557603693,4.163892139784949,3.802181259600616,91.4661290322581,73.83870967741936,7.034715821812598,27.264208909370197,7.447530270364453,1.2490596006144394,351,13,78,4,7,112,59,93,0.32899999999999996,0.6709999999999999,0.0,-0.9898,2,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,8,4,1,1,5,0,10,2,2,0,1,12,14,3,0,1,6,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,7,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,6,2,11,0,9,7,2,10,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,7,54,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18649611788502815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16177525538139126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895917799583832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890830163929395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063784086744772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11956825260499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252245241630593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562364966338642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.246403684619294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19743472709686116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4672215766546358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837025387744345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17403498768469505,0.0,0.4210795406515681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20807894421517947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680159934064155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18388823729497586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267883600475285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20280636113626524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709657303347201
mentalhealth,Raven_knight_07,2020/03/27,"I just don't know anymore. I am almost certain I have problems,butijust don't know who to talk to or where to go. No normal person flips their morals so frequently, nor do they sit there holding a knife in their hand conteplating stabbing themselves.",3.5129787234042524,6.3224620000000025,3.641957446808512,85.69400000000002,77.93617021276594,6.313191489361702,28.54893617021277,7.554174236665415,1.980297021276596,202,9,35,3,5,62,38,47,0.05,0.8370000000000001,0.113,0.4228,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,5,1,1,0,1,8,8,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,4,8,0,5,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,2,1,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4127489398355528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40878191492112864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342571869117693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4530579032562774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4038588751220551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3599085796128237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33130286548938914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Expensive_Setting,2020/03/27,"extreme heart/chest pains from crying ? i've been crying and my chest is hurting (left side, probably my heart) to a very extreme degree. I don't know what to do my left wrist is also extremely hurt. It hurts very much like someone is taking my heart and clenching it. having trouble breathing. I'm a healthy 17 y/o girl. is this a problem or just a normal reaction to disappointment?",3.1412548262548228,5.4760053648648634,4.159884169884169,84.06716216216219,76.43243243243244,6.390733590733591,28.138996138996138,7.447530270364453,1.7865969111969116,303,13,55,4,7,98,51,74,0.326,0.611,0.063,-0.9711,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,4,0,8,6,5,0,0,7,11,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,1,0,5,1,4,10,1,3,0,4,0,0,1,3,0,1,1,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228159024781668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33739543036283404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5459703696012123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4932237957011652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440219905257668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33372489104101555,0.0,0.0,0.07503022807008856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11289716204693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15047338065271512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634173295520666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655825623182028,0.14695296375430608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13012575044419386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547119639180192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534351072855007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Balmung6942,2020/03/27,Just A Reminder To Practice Selfcare Regularly... ...especially after a particularly rough and emotionally intense therapy session.  I speak from experience.,10.778571428571432,15.811533523809528,12.425714285714285,18.444285714285733,70.90476190476191,14.228571428571426,59.38095238095239,11.20814326018867,11.21635238095238,128,11,9,6,3,45,20,21,0.0,0.929,0.071,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.598707724143998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5206409898483144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6086723426771433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Waff3le,2020/03/27,"Covid is effecting everyone. Please remember to keep loved ones close if you can or talk to them as much as you can.  As I, and so many others, start to worry more about this it can definitely effect your mental health more then normal!:( I’m starting to get very anxious and needed to adjust meds for a bit. 

Please remember it’s normal to struggle, and everyone is going through this virus together! Please stay safe everyone! And if you need help please reach out. 💜",2.7734090909090905,5.5591058863636365,3.530636363636365,85.42345454545458,81.04545454545455,7.156363636363636,22.43636363636364,8.238735603445708,1.5972690909090916,370,12,68,8,10,117,61,88,0.073,0.7,0.22699999999999998,0.9311,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,4,1,2,2,3,0,1,1,0,5,2,0,2,0,20,14,12,0,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,6,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,6,2,13,14,4,7,0,0,0,1,8,2,0,3,3,43,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512556889040647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14617136586584384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3838080748929713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995111982184593,0.0,0.0760918162542434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14231702053051773,0.0,0.0,0.08974251693024324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190060883303861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083943383153865,0.0,0.0,0.13574173927393948,0.0,0.0,0.14871973770666913,0.0,0.1349279331033869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842331869996557,0.19855298176663186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26236424780433426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072618894899427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5878766665339806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033387273662399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895336803958931,0.1427071319753116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996913965055593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761435795273083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047188380055074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597008544605504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blacktowelss,2020/03/27,"I need help because my country has a fucked medical system. Okay so I have visited a therapist a few times and it didn't go well. Things she told me: ""You can't do things you love ever anyway, so just get used to it."" ""You don't have any problems you're just weird."" ""You keep faking the victim for attention."" ""It's not about your mental state, it's about school.""

Now is anyone here a professional, knows a professional who can help me or knows a place where I could contact a professional fod free?

Here are my problems pretty much: I keep dissociating with myself, my body and my entire existence. I have a hard time believing that I am real and that I as an entity exist. I don't know why its been like this ever since I was 10 (I'm 13 now).

I'm mad at everyone...? I just don't like people. I am super sensitive to literally sounds of people talking. If it's a topic that I even in the slightest dislike I will start swearing, I'll become extremely uncomfortable, I'll start feeling overwhelmed. Every time I have a conversation with anyone I just end up being upset.

I see things kind of different, at least I've been told so. I don't know is it because my skepticism or what but you have to convince me that something that is obviously true, true. Like for example once my friend told me she had a ""the 1975"" band T-shirt. I was so convinced she was lying about and was faking it for fun, when she actually showed me the shirt I was so surprised. Another example is my told me that we were going to this one place I didn't exactly know the path to. I knew the place 100%, just not how to get to it. I was so convinced he was lying I literally started trying to get there by myself. Turns out he wasn't lying to me and I almost got lost. I also need to touch or interact with an object in order to be convenient that it's real. Final example would be fruits. When I see a fruit I NEED to peel it to be convinced that indeed it is the fruit that it is. 

For a long period in my life I was convinced that a pink pencil sharpener had killed me. Basically I took this pink sharpener from school without permission and kept it. Then when I started dissociating I was convinced that the pink pencil sharpener killed me and I was in hell. I also for a long time believed that all triangles were evil and wanted to kill me.

When I was in kindergarten I would often fantasise about goblins sexually abusing women. That's it I am myself disturbed at that fact.

I haven't been able to sleep for a long time. I just can't shut down. Even when I was little (4-3 yrs old) I would sing until 2 am. Recently I would just go pacing around my room, or twitching, being unable to stop my thoughts from rushing. Even once when I pulled an all nighter for 2 days straight I was full of energy and constantly wanted to sing and talk to myself. I just need help with falling asleep because it's becoming a huge problem

Tw kind of s*lf h*rm. I kind of just hurt myself for fun when I'm bored. I know this comes off as SuPeR EdGy OmG, but hear me out. I don't know what it is I just like the adrenalin rush when I do it makes me feel happy.

That's it, please help me because due to these facts I haven't been able to make friends I need serious advice.",2.7948057813911475,4.422595707317075,4.383448509485096,85.27261743450771,75.15853658536584,7.542186088527553,24.34327009936766,8.285830014693849,1.4237313459801269,2528,80,524,44,54,847,278,656,0.136,0.703,0.161,0.9398,2,0,1,0,0,3,80.0,1,6,0,3,46,49,9,3,29,1,65,12,4,4,10,88,116,38,3,16,20,0,4,4,2,5,3,2,1,1,45,19,3,4,12,4,1,10,15,22,1,1,34,14,90,28,62,71,6,72,1,3,5,2,34,24,2,7,39,359,135,7,0.1292083351584567,0.07654537442972544,0.06304434829411573,0.0,0.0,0.06313044485788458,0.0,0.0,0.06469174177792504,0.0,0.0,0.1033278589445321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04393304932517855,0.06774310264796046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903454721862236,0.0,0.0,0.0575114060244287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15752840368837367,0.14270045479918236,0.0,0.14557354748884066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176066621347378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055650769925568506,0.0,0.06981415410214124,0.0,0.051581170923053414,0.0,0.0,0.04166434351916714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674976048241499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057220116942346036,0.0,0.0,0.12801133016899405,0.11687633646761515,0.05443179754039993,0.061732050672731825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533161653219967,0.0,0.0,0.07077070775628103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982603922829024,0.059725511909309276,0.1012590333643876,0.0,0.11014811171670473,0.0,0.051669854516132985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877233769770336,0.05787264459926381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281359214967285,0.0,0.17321124692380122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691600975687393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114846305053227,0.2144248185679844,0.2018258969298342,0.2485333266962041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04563183413342703,0.12624933198663582,0.06475034803818118,0.0,0.17151796599906774,0.0,0.0,0.07052308050604858,0.0,0.058307783555358775,0.0,0.08624756703743533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650819021329302,0.06510580585748214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047491496621526484,0.239515858317814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779120628367585,0.13760266003987962,0.04377745592068358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957679075225893,0.0,0.2024928144724497,0.07091597573457599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572566404556603,0.0,0.18545239016973256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706737271482215,0.0,0.0,0.06378882157963849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076573328415206,0.10296231446174356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05344123502258465,0.0,0.06465082393642561,0.0,0.0,0.04973544447654783,0.0,0.0,0.18290864931361406,0.0,0.0,0.05401197687936656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385276547561983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07501041792526528,0.12876041485273024,0.0,0.0,0.051288492702361736,0.1883560482420074,0.0,0.0,0.2469282026909273,0.07177760727612566,0.04386198905736015,0.07027078277247396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05579725813585885,0.0,0.0,0.0762104237489876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808690530234632,0.0,0.05829521270479252,0.0,0.0,0.06227611214127988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835717882566527,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bosweafs,2020/03/27,"I'm a high school student and online learning is horrible for me right now I've never liked doing work at home, if I had home work, I'd do it at school or rush and half ass it when I got home.

For me, there's school and there's home, one gives me anxiety sometimes because I'm obese and the other is relaxing mostly.

I hate mixing them, when I absolutely had to do an assignment at home I'd procrastinate severely in front of the computer and I'd get this feeling in my forehead. I'm not sure how to describe it but it's a light feeling on my forehead/eyes that I can best describe as annoying, I'm annoyed.

With the coronavirus we have online learning now and the teachers barely know what to do, this week is supposed to be easy, just discussion questions and quick reviews of what we were going over, but that feeling in my forehead persists and it's been an hour of me sitting at computer and doing nothing, I try to get started but can't and get frustrated.

I went through what I believe was a mini depression episode in January,  I didn't want to do anything, not the things I love and especially the things I don't, I just wanted to be in my bed and I'd get annoyed at the thought of having to do anything. I didn't say anything to anyone about it because it would just come off as me being lazy.

Also had some pretty negative thoughts about myself during that depression.


I should also mention that my grandma on my moms side was depression diagnosed with severe depression (they straight up told us they're shocked that she never attempted suicide) and I'm pretty sure my dad has depression, there's definitely something wrong with him but I don't know if he's been diagnosed 

What's up with me? Anyone know how to describe these feelings? It seems more extreme than me just being a lazy teen.",6.493319327731093,6.258691350140058,6.939567226890754,77.10212394957983,65.47058823529412,9.941120448179273,36.337394957983186,9.516144504307137,3.3709485714285705,1440,66,272,25,20,471,171,357,0.20199999999999999,0.7090000000000001,0.08900000000000001,-0.9926,0,0,1,0,0,1,28.0,3,0,2,5,18,18,5,0,13,0,33,7,3,2,4,58,63,28,1,6,13,2,4,1,0,2,3,1,6,0,23,20,1,0,13,1,0,5,10,12,0,2,15,6,37,6,42,42,4,36,0,5,0,2,17,20,1,7,11,195,60,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110945196124314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749305569959684,0.0,0.0,0.12338008546389588,0.0,0.21780875601040034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756415036494947,0.0,0.0,0.09940108948367664,0.09258830247244902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599934543919784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3799469148209612,0.17909614619943526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784399425047534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18437888678011224,0.08463492904171767,0.05014117147004103,0.0,0.07056281750309626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710543502082545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321617531556972,0.4424920270906882,0.0,0.08688536240398499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14546098443664618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04310302717263928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962788996710224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332984828474708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360914813589904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465573719540366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597845815864748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951620265812918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09883390773239484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534497649664601,0.0,0.07016127961448759,0.0,0.26786988253974525,0.0,0.0803181214214175,0.0,0.19934173756129647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792109489950762,0.08725829636121149,0.0,0.06244719363988406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650550655729406,0.0,0.1663049250919315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11722757547200395,0.0,0.0,0.1400840232455328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430423244856994,0.0,0.05990002406937187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061256552739152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407658920646616,0.0,0.07077000244427496,0.0,0.0,0.0817868793177114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845993253037635,0.0,0.0,0.06267359718144147,0.09646186300372836,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alec_vito,2020/03/27,"I feel like there’s a hole at the center of my existence Alright now that I’ve hopefully drawn you in with that dramatic heading I want to explain where I’m coming from. I’m a very logical person, some would say I have little empathy, others would say my actions border on sociopathy and as a result I likely process things different than most people. I simply cannot understand what anyone sees in life as a whole; I’m not saying that living is too much or that I struggle at all but simply that I don’t understand why everyone else wants to live. Maybe my viewpoint is corrupted by my logic but all the things other people want. Love, money, sex, they all seem so pointless and the idea that we live every day for those around us seems so insignificant. I’ve been to therapy multiple times, I’ve been told I’m an apathetic young man that is either bisexual or asexual and the only thing I’ve ever found solace in is hatred. Without that hatred I have found that I am nothing, no motivation, no goals, no hopes and no reason to live. I’m not going to kill myself because I find it ridiculous but currently I’m miserable. If I wanted to go to therapy I surely could but I just don’t see how it would help me. How is talking with someone going to change the fact that I find no value in anything at all, I find some pleasure in my interactions with others but even then I think this may just be a distraction from what I see to be the true facts of life, life only means what you believe it to mean and below that it is nothing. I wish I could find something to live for, any reason to live and yet all that I can find is that the only thing anybody lives for is hope that things get better or for interpersonal relationships which in the end are pointless. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know where to go, and I don’t know who to talk to in order to help myself. Which is why I’ve ended up here on a random subreddit of the internet. With the small hope that somebody, anybody, might be able to offer me better answers than what I’ve already heard hundreds of times over. “Live for love” “live for your family” “live out of hope”",6.007150349650352,5.6384832144522194,6.839525058275063,77.86390297202799,66.5058275058275,9.760722610722613,30.22931235431236,9.2995712137729,2.448362004662004,1685,53,332,28,24,562,206,429,0.079,0.745,0.17600000000000002,0.9919,2,0,1,0,0,1,31.0,2,3,1,4,16,20,2,3,17,1,33,7,1,6,10,90,76,23,1,16,15,0,1,2,0,5,3,4,0,2,37,15,0,0,26,0,1,6,14,5,0,0,6,8,38,15,58,60,11,40,0,1,3,3,24,22,0,17,13,233,75,2,0.06172295196762431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06811281233470359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041973723908194566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04315812314587849,0.0,0.05079273033301203,0.05494651327691871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037625738627736036,0.0,0.0,0.06954063039657006,0.0,0.10917787030575084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529469901038144,0.05316885779643697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985615094076713,0.0,0.0,0.03980619780670299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448734774550674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051561606252742094,0.0,0.10933643020113208,0.0,0.0,0.04076742765159181,0.055831943760404935,0.052004249121813145,0.05897892568406168,0.0,0.0,0.05818690591302519,0.0,0.031208979082030106,0.04409488921849975,0.0,0.0,0.28206829946426004,0.0,0.0,0.13535206196846886,0.0,0.0,0.03224769488218835,0.0,0.14031430403674866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334555579085631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274318727982125,0.0,0.0,0.3065240912398756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967769982791283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828730133602906,0.0,0.10176396062028244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079023901784745,0.060309433169302436,0.06186261307285385,0.5450249740431342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141474795143644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620090013800915,0.1344687787923019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654782980404308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045373471630080285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844967418031133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082925894234866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558184649984231,0.053894100892888035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269229491317029,0.0,0.06626735124328878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725370634763651,0.0,0.0,0.14755560426199832,0.11238051463874237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05229765690361824,0.0475173439352761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452623088621241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817315176835381,0.0,0.0,0.09922114153542043,0.0,0.0,0.14117114956716287,0.0,0.20502993328668093,0.0395495753572869,0.0,0.0,0.07198229931030596,0.0,0.0,0.05897892568406168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851153955022182,0.0742451114704238,0.0,0.0,0.05092789952374944,0.14562318502818916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113907275194808,0.06891147161816168,0.07097834864220291,0.059498723108112425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153864247938207,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,keytee2019,2020/03/27,"Ex Says my daughter should have contact with my family My ex has my kids in another state. My daughter was molested by her cousin when she was 4. Fast forward two years. My ex married my ex best friend, mines to another state and files a protective order which goes on for over a year. During that time she puts my daughter in a mental institution and comes out stating I molested my kid. We are fighting a USCCA fight now and she is claiming that my daughters “trauma counselor” states that my daughter should have no contact with me or anyone from my family.  I am curious what a mental health person would say about this. We know she is lying and I know I didn’t molest my kid. So we are doing everything we can to prove she is a lying. Help!!",3.1221654373024212,5.204935020547946,4.307808219178085,84.1809747102213,75.50684931506851,7.232033719704952,25.61433087460485,8.139509932561175,1.7075791359325605,587,21,111,10,13,192,90,146,0.16399999999999998,0.759,0.077,-0.9183,0,0,0,0,3,0,12.0,4,0,0,1,4,8,5,0,6,0,17,1,0,0,1,19,20,7,0,3,1,10,0,0,1,3,1,2,0,4,6,12,0,1,3,0,0,3,2,6,0,1,3,2,29,2,13,14,1,19,0,0,0,0,32,6,0,1,7,82,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40893909511429455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634522999154464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20463551062828306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679711631606303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17524917960359576,0.0,0.3676483818534829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065286558767518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072708587001008,0.0,0.0,0.1307012223604776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143286069032552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3930187471985721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17026235261878084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19602410920932606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101361380832463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370331283418116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904820495376255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851904851535568,0.0,0.0,0.25114112757311624
mentalhealth,crijogra,2020/03/27,"Covid-19 is deteriorating my mental health I feel powerless, I feel that any of my family members might catch it and the worse happen.

I am obsessively washing my hands, so bad they are extremely dry now.

I don't know how I will deal with this situation if it lasts more than a couple months...

I want to stop smoking because I think it could make the disease worse, but I am so stressed that I can't stop cold turkey (I have been reducing it to 3 per day, tho)",3.6230590062111774,5.0200139456521775,4.927018633540374,83.14717391304347,72.58695652173913,8.300621118012423,27.27329192546584,8.841846274778883,1.926181366459628,361,13,76,7,7,120,69,92,0.20800000000000002,0.779,0.013000000000000001,-0.9390000000000001,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,2,3,0,11,3,1,2,0,15,18,7,0,3,2,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,4,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,4,14,0,5,14,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,6,49,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412782045855381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17346389897620906,0.12664344033800368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587273886887505,0.2298731816650291,0.0,0.13398258800691867,0.21418276585668752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19584970863580986,0.0,0.2100908912109191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18371404399051725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22083022414218892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11417484010863975,0.1693452732222589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867579883575698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093647379574945,0.220391605155215,0.0,0.0,0.1658253362270688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335214904202313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34737926171035205,0.2379787432127601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331188295520066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253726981556685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4234332356916775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xAekov,2020/03/27,"My mom is bipolar schizophrenic Our family has dealt with this for 20 years. She has a job and is lucky to be paid while we are all off work, yet thinks she doesn't. She cant go anywhere without thinking someones following or watching her. All her thoughts make no sense. She thinks the house is bugged, she thinks she has a hit on her ect. Shes pushed everyone away. Shes been in and out of hospitals every couple years. There was this shot she would get every few months and she stopped taking it when she started working bc she doesnt think she needs it and itll cost money now that shes not on medicaid. Suggestions on ways to help? Its hard not to get angry and call her names bc its been going on so long.",2.003881773399016,4.131984565517243,2.609285714285715,94.80250000000002,79.20689655172413,6.0738916256157625,21.391625615763548,7.1686216300943375,0.4481625615763552,562,16,123,7,14,174,98,145,0.038,0.905,0.057,0.5722,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,2,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,3,0,19,2,0,1,2,26,36,9,0,2,4,1,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,8,8,0,1,6,0,3,4,7,0,0,0,5,2,21,1,15,27,3,23,0,0,1,0,25,8,0,2,10,80,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15498176600530866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843870827933724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18252088138857306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779654010377765,0.1576227039846916,0.0,0.0,0.15550601066632136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17236559688564956,0.0,0.18749680291293624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14776834122749127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056665380123784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19033729026019844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16369356063753052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14598103301882456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010953451564573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19319469041967496,0.13166645323953233,0.0,0.0,0.1223129211612093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976684040278525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675683689758963,0.0,0.0,0.13791075706229494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240265222073251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5284863141332636,0.0,0.13095678525087992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093454172011912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901187604153866,0.0,0.2401801348643017,0.0,0.0,0.11718014113007592,0.0,0.0,0.2124527499141882
mentalhealth,Dont____Panic,2020/03/27,"Extreme Anxiety from Quarantine Help.

Background...  I'm a successful, stable professional.  I speak in front of groups, I've raised several kids out of foster care, I've looked down the barrel of a gun getting mugged in Eastern Europe, I dove into a freezing lake to save a drowning toddler once.  I was a competitive extreme skiier as a youth and I'm a competitive hockey coach today.  I run a successful business, I'm the chair of several organizations.

Today, I'm sitting at home wracked with anxiety attacks.  I went for a run earlier and my watch reported my heart rate actually went DOWN when I was running from when I was sitting at home.

But the minute, I crossed the threshold to come inside, I was overcome with anxiety and a clamping feeling inside and I can't shake it.

I spent some time meditating yesterday to get it under control and I was partially successful, but I ended up taking a couple sleeping pills to get to sleep, finally, at 5am.

I can't do this very much longer and I don't know what to do.   I went to the grocery store and stood to the side of the grocery aisle and chatted with random people.  It was the best thing that's happened in days, it felt sane and normal.

As soon as I got in my car to leave, I was overcome with anxiety.

I've known a lot of people with social anxiety.

It appears I have a case of the opposite thing?   Separation anxiety?  Quarantine anxiety?

The problem is that \*\*I'm not functional\*\* right now. I can't work a lot of the day, I can barely get out of bed sometimes.  If I get smashed drunk it goes away.  Some porn helps for a few minutes.

But it creeps back over the coming minutes or hours and it's eating me up.

Any coping strategies?

What do I do?",2.6672909821102597,5.061061975903616,4.327612267250824,81.95481014968965,78.33734939759036,7.397736400146037,28.73530485578679,8.391295532112219,2.3988200803212854,1344,62,250,28,33,450,173,332,0.081,0.821,0.098,0.8003,0,2,0,1,0,0,49.0,0,0,0,6,5,9,1,1,27,0,18,7,3,1,0,40,44,20,1,3,6,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,3,1,15,20,2,1,4,4,2,13,5,3,0,0,14,6,27,6,47,30,7,49,0,0,2,1,7,19,0,8,15,162,42,6,0.0,0.0,0.09742809391936397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678936870891098,0.0,0.5346339119879422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135808465611466,0.0938016725695865,0.07676973823210362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477447503316988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017921297993072,0.0,0.0,0.1720042663839945,0.0,0.0,0.1119775048758376,0.0,0.11046953712307564,0.0,0.12877530447413427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021598358230594,0.0,0.0,0.08842738609221552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05048140748246195,0.0,0.09586073463647846,0.10936833116034228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608077985247507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985006705299763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828696438462473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830924867492275,0.13383944865647335,0.0,0.20029255794417736,0.0,0.09832093245961693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054868696063388636,0.0,0.0,0.10571468594381804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383929811879491,0.0,0.0,0.1697584536153698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733928753078268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782065255813208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632487485932972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384310603337756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553207848087496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526163832814249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22557845156951295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998214500388528,0.10177290292966794,0.0,0.0,0.09874295077669402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506621924567279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326566893603578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058216703812339565,0.0,0.18927068110562006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237731972349545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27765421061686424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726837064415973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,How_about_this_now,2020/03/27,"I can't sleep. I can never sleep. I feel like I'm constantly drowning. Being secluded in my own home only leads to thinking, and thinking is never good for me. I need help but help is so far away that I don't know if it's even worth it anymore. I can't keep pestering my friends and relatives so I guess I could try with the people in this community. 

There's something wrong with me, but I can't gauge what it is. I just know that I feel like I'm being crushed every second I'm awake.",0.5068881118881094,2.55384311538462,2.6203496503496524,93.11555944055945,84.19230769230771,5.7048951048951055,20.993006993007,6.980632752743323,0.4285884615384621,380,12,86,5,11,128,63,104,0.13699999999999998,0.745,0.11800000000000001,-0.2199,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,1,0,11,2,2,1,2,21,23,7,1,3,4,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,7,4,0,1,6,0,1,1,6,1,0,1,0,2,15,4,7,20,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,5,55,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18729516201778346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743714604723734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040870686967636,0.0,0.15078675820136928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247381111092022,0.0,0.15911996853336094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190983308223865,0.2698386190903275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459102669632219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584040929347207,0.0,0.0,0.2080470168416766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25317341522373105,0.0,0.1894387321811932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16786456879987124,0.0,0.0,0.20758147632385832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18453175019767806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003489710397496,0.2913159572480144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14363407881660786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092950049316132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3779863070950245,0.0,0.0,0.14539116321167272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.242023576635765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12822134550007533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20648522360287733,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eyeluv2d,2020/03/27,"Praying to be dead. All I want is to be dead. I hate being alive. It's the worst curse I could imagine. I hate doing all this shit every single day, constantly doing things I hate just to be afloat. If you're reading this just please pray for me to die I want it more than anything I've ever wanted",0.4895238095238099,2.6578360476190497,2.1549206349206362,95.64285714285715,85.34920634920636,4.234920634920635,16.936507936507937,5.288315135182226,-0.6808349206349207,233,5,51,1,7,76,43,63,0.409,0.45,0.142,-0.982,0,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,4,0,1,0,8,1,1,0,3,11,14,1,3,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,0,6,9,5,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,36,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17911517918606454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352125373924708,0.0,0.17378335740823672,0.0,0.0,0.14037233687021464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258961421069532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968854311509933,0.1833874717665317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.644680925544666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389247110233326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21771834884920835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22342429460979413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14460326506717625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3851435438047869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TrxshAcc,2020/03/27,"How do I stop worrying if I have narcissism. I worry too an unhealthy amount. I really don't want to be one. Any time I notice a *little* sign of narcissism, I start worrying. Like for example, let's say I listen to a sad song, and I don't cry, I'm like: ""Why didn't I cry? I must be a narcissist because I obviously lack empathy"". The thing is I don't think I'm able to cry, over anything. My life could be ruined and I would feel REALLY bad, but I don't think I would cry. I want to be able to cry, but I honestly don't know how. How do I stop worrying if I have narcissism? Or do I have narcissism and should feel bad about it? Idk. It probably doesn't help that I have bad anxiety.",0.4998359073359069,2.17852135810811,3.6017760617760644,88.06851351351355,82.04054054054055,8.552895752895754,22.05791505791505,9.23628265651192,1.7345023166023164,523,17,124,16,14,189,74,148,0.311,0.573,0.11599999999999999,-0.9777,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,5,0,25,1,0,3,2,28,36,11,0,10,5,0,2,2,0,4,1,3,0,0,4,3,0,2,5,1,0,0,7,5,0,1,1,5,22,3,9,25,2,6,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,3,6,79,26,0,0.22348228146274526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598780746432067,0.0,0.0854816668105482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195343785969297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27989755524038906,0.06811636224607356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921620841462655,0.0,0.613711980668343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11299935639879333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489773123008245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061410008662673925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426288709173768,0.07892607227669546,0.10918215419662987,0.11199397846379897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721802933796186,0.0,0.0,0.07571868884303011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047584897656942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431684720959048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886104007057367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909095453816058,0.0,0.0,0.1868411941769974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423584873759162,0.14319842214230766,0.0,0.0,0.06515715775891359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318156398329818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008289992874377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4539142098270265,0.0,0.15875540073123384,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pancakes_will2live,2020/03/27,"I need to know what's after depression I've been depressed for a year and a half. I have no hopes and dreams strong enough to motivate me from fighting, but I still do and it's exhausting. (I'll have access to a long term therapist soon and I'm on medication.)

I can't go back to the way I lived before this, but that's all I ever knew. And I can't imagine anything else.

People who overcame their depression and anxiety, how is life now? Was it worth the fight?",0.7433238636363626,3.0421734270833336,2.6865530303030307,91.34556818181822,85.5625,6.407575757575757,21.227272727272727,7.686295010490155,0.92545,363,12,79,7,11,121,68,96,0.226,0.67,0.10400000000000001,-0.9171,0,0,0,0,3,0,12.0,0,0,1,2,6,8,2,0,5,0,8,3,0,2,2,17,14,9,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,4,1,1,1,3,6,0,1,3,0,9,2,8,11,3,12,0,3,0,0,4,1,0,1,9,54,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860154895870114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18136628160962373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694701279174567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875398867872496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5694775946670588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18411171714077865,0.0,0.0,0.2277269195101524,0.0,0.0,0.1993598683999274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125255540571165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21890193453850731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112331179785145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15567148530888503,0.0,0.0,0.1946127965134005,0.19504261320552246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.222024745753954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16342007779193482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15279412202491804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600770790091472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558955473479956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17493926880669758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192713487860845
mentalhealth,PrinessOfUnicorns,2020/03/27,"Best low-cost therapy options I do not want to use apps such as Talkspace since the price depends on the package you pick. For the audio options, the price can be upwards of $300 a month. I also prefer face to face or video interaction of some sort but just not over messaging of any kind. I have medical insurance but my deductible is too high to pay for therapy through insurance and would be cheaper out of pocket for a sliding scale. Any insight would be appreciated for low-cost frequent options.",8.000736842105265,7.523024442105264,7.843157894736844,72.67210526315792,62.47368421052632,10.968421052631578,41.10526315789474,10.355215969177356,4.320010526315788,402,21,72,8,5,129,67,95,0.027999999999999997,0.851,0.121,0.8988,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,4,2,0,0,6,0,9,3,2,3,0,21,11,6,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,5,2,16,6,2,7,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,7,2,48,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970452138886452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3351195772171105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585805785608349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603341016161377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565866710426103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24822109849285195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19667335358390106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20382382240497965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5635575254375379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21280964835789948,0.0,0.0,0.1453325308542862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500696003037365,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,norih,2020/03/27,"Mental Health Survey for Class Hello everyone! I am working on a project for class regarding mental health. I would really appreciate it if you could fill out this survey. All responses will be kept confidential. Thank you!

[**https://forms.gle/TGJgYcaakjDmUpiX9**](https://forms.gle/TGJgYcaakjDmUpiX9)",11.803653846153846,16.575189974358974,8.398429487179493,43.53302884615385,85.15384615384616,9.12948717948718,25.387820512820515,8.472884824447931,3.8936897435897446,255,8,26,7,8,73,32,39,0.0,0.848,0.152,0.725,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,0,1,6,7,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,4,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,0,18,6,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265071849555977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710825048984574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6031085368778069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5717951936780492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817421305225571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611880235065397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20653316730370144,0.0,0.0,0.2015286210607123,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Little-Fire-Storm,2020/03/27,"Not feeling so good Hi all, feel like I'm struggling lately. I have been on a lengthy wait list for mental health help, pre pandemic I was told 6 more months. I finally got an appointment at like an after care clinic I was hoping for further assessment. I have GAD and Depression diagnosis. 

My appointment was cancelled.  I was not offered a telephone conference or anything in the mean time.

I'm really struggling lately I believe I have undiagnosed ADHD, Possibly Autism but if not severe misaphonia. I also feel like ptsd is an issue as I have dealt with a lot of trauma in my life. I cannot focus on anything or complete things. I am a female in her 30's and really feeling like I have lost the ability to function. 

I am taking medication for my anxiety prescribed by the crisis team at my local hospital. Unsure what to do right now...",3.2048125000000027,5.752096856250002,5.19875,75.60125000000002,77.3125,8.25,28.75,9.017664075816787,2.9958125000000013,667,30,112,17,16,229,104,160,0.163,0.6940000000000001,0.14300000000000002,-0.5095,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,3,12,0,2,10,0,15,4,0,0,1,19,29,9,0,2,7,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,5,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,8,4,19,7,17,21,3,17,0,2,0,0,7,10,0,5,11,78,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16586166722592924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110366857643345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055775692808684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22714158060960501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554904471693576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071078875862855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470126635092734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188681451943858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27912879624417875,0.2957839468826264,0.0,0.1511836344629798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157565658282344,0.11037951499402802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466985890817568,0.0,0.0,0.0925054541279502,0.0,0.0,0.13707545572500307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14404698913664435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31136345857171194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748081869212448,0.2696996181526663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065464176431778,0.11733149681492525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15033377196537262,0.0,0.1390309467598491,0.1390820109934782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015857522680228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558597634044544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16132675846827338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768259773764293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11786011751261635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591245565780612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885568461900295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376663637957058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916879695454184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047496725446755,0.0,0.0,0.13187484030394095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clam14,2020/03/27,"Dont know what to do Okay I know this is gonna sound like a post made purely for attention but honestly its not and I dont care if people think that. The thing is I just dont know what to do at this point. Im 16, no-one fucking likes me, no-one listens or cares. Its like everytime im sitting with people ins chool its as if no cares about my opinion and no one cares about me as a person. Its just shit. Im so lonely and its like everyday I just feel shit. I know other people feel like this and 100 times worse but fuck this isnt fun. I just feel numb to life, nothing is fun, no-one cares, im always bored or getting upset. Cant see things getting better anytime soon. Dont know what to do.",-1.255966386554622,0.7753208823529434,1.0566573295985078,100.46352941176471,95.07843137254902,3.9600373482726425,15.128851540616246,5.622346879071545,-0.9334952380952384,537,12,131,4,21,179,78,153,0.228,0.546,0.226,-0.3609,0,4,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,8,23,4,1,3,1,12,6,2,1,1,29,34,13,0,2,11,0,3,5,0,1,2,2,0,1,16,5,0,0,10,0,0,0,9,8,0,1,1,6,9,15,12,32,0,8,0,1,1,2,2,3,4,5,8,72,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043087968680537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549005825852382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4927689140558743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4531505610161394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14662627686947655,0.06905565455042832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17872570556645,0.10100425320482437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4176480182630106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656156996432337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827552825475885,0.2361218871893783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146432216692946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275020219774877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550095970051288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010406602360198,0.08440189961978163,0.0,0.0,0.09137723411566627,0.0,0.09257588160100548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702743647837006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984451769708376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12843643784098493,0.06193737782071829,0.0,0.0,0.056364636390021365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850726748855104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FailOsprey,2020/03/27,"Hey, just venting For the last few years I've been trying to get my shit together.  I'm in my late 20s, and it's only in the last few years that I've been able to be a productive member of society.  Before then I was a remorseless drug addict and had issues well beyond that.  I had no idea how to act normal, and never had anything productive to talk about.  Girls freaked me out, feeling like I wasn't good enough, and I was pretty cut off from reality.
Since then, I'm pretty decent at acting normal, but 
I'm not sure how to not feel so alone.  I think I need to connect with people, but I have no idea how to want to do it.  On and off I've been able to do, once I'm out of the groove of things,however, I forget how to do it.  My confidence will take a nose dive.

Even when I'm being myself I feel like an alien.  The things I like are wierd-science, ideas, asking, why,why,why.  The corona virus is a god send, because normal people are interested in science and the economy for once.  I come from a good family, but I'm living in a Puerto Rican boarding house working at a random factory.  I live so far away from home that I don't have a family in practicr...I was worried about going to work while they were doing the temperature checks because I knew if I had a fever and for sent home, I don't know anyone who would be able to give me a ride back home.  Work provides transportation, so I'd have to walk the 20 or so miles back.  Not really self pity, but that fact dawned on me earlier and I was like damn.

Idk...it seems like I'm a late bloomer in life.  Everyone already seems to have their set friends and significant others...I don't know how I'm supposed to fit into things.  I've never once met a girl-or really anybody in the last few years-who gives a shit about the things that I care about.  I'm not sad about it, just numb.  Empty room, empty life.  I'm used to living like this, but a part of me knows that the way I'm living is desolate.  Devoid of really anyone to have meaningful contact with, most days I just want to die.

Not literally-i just want to be something and somewhere that's not me.",3.670036132275549,4.1300511571754015,5.097392192286545,85.47911161731206,71.59681093394076,8.333076741811327,24.47733877935748,8.433251757073789,1.3026679915167696,1634,41,358,25,29,550,202,439,0.11,0.748,0.141,0.9134,2,1,2,0,0,1,62.0,0,0,2,3,24,21,4,0,26,0,35,9,3,6,4,68,71,30,1,9,17,0,3,6,1,2,6,0,4,2,16,16,0,0,14,0,1,9,14,8,1,0,16,4,30,13,55,49,6,49,0,2,0,0,15,22,3,6,22,216,46,3,0.23140024746866256,0.0,0.0,0.0840868085667377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988695657142496,0.08511864240444575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786695556922052,0.0,0.06347422902927635,0.0,0.07210933154864023,0.0,0.0724693832423853,0.11862167121236955,0.0,0.0940396287183006,0.0,0.0656348557207603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864265810412023,0.0,0.0,0.06644360787202312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04974467211748156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005230782831536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945027411575496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079699437606775,0.0,0.05094589368844708,0.0,0.0,0.07370428429868581,0.0,0.0,0.1454290394792131,0.0,0.11700291791964405,0.11020825535171212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0595930857270521,0.0,0.040299026203123665,0.1479868018606384,0.04383669775241216,0.1293916992442229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321133154340017,0.0,0.0,0.08900160572896668,0.0,0.2612227132571929,0.0,0.08050724622852616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12717152436949974,0.1886220862665736,0.17401970548665555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896322540362957,0.2261009448704191,0.0,0.2724408772851869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057193450478708024,0.11898009081372615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267231115947278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24643371146702964,0.0,0.05866343849814079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352797273968725,0.0,0.1069491970576103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15694482771083804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14824092387040247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14043872967331525,0.08046697487619117,0.0,0.15835268581044912,0.06380555864341833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05938107189820275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726973315765909,0.0,0.057994729326771126,0.061996917876574874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373204225846893,0.04942397834848163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236852617334989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661850581531167,0.0,0.0,0.13648586133069715,0.06122491521522847,0.0,0.0,0.06935220417561927,0.0,0.06960091044479554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16846213612083238,0.07833272791324618,0.0,0.05479336553476484,0.0,0.0,0.0993427817431282
mentalhealth,GreenDiggy,2020/03/27,"Inner Voice? I’ve always heard that people have a ‘voice in their head’ ,like a narrative going on in their head. But i honestly don’t remember experiencing this. Maybe when i was younger, but not that i remember. I have to mental force myself to think about things, or else i’ll sit there for hours not really doing anything, and i’ll look back and realize that it happened. I’ve tried looking for an explanation but just can’t find one, any one else like this ?",5.224,6.138104733333333,5.862222222222222,79.75000000000001,68.33333333333334,9.555555555555557,27.222222222222207,9.725611199111238,2.3222222222222224,366,11,72,8,6,119,61,90,0.0,0.9109999999999999,0.08900000000000001,0.7476,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,6,2,2,0,0,14,12,7,0,0,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,7,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,2,6,7,3,8,10,0,9,0,0,2,0,3,4,0,1,5,45,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921717675490513,0.0,0.0,0.13012345674301054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15746340884128102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14713508928902624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196940283642049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17488894835345548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874769124420562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16920873624076818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3927572739003134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18843960536492307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18696630147388724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213688856758307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922351618457264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928341565710449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25932522232411503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13265687034782098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225826689004135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4335208159023872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712335800085234,0.1226083125115243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991298631521994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EdLob,2020/03/28,"This Covid Isolation is not doing me any favours So as with everyone right now, I’m under lockdown. I live alone. In a house I hate because my ex and I moved in together - she dumped me very suddenly last year and I’ve still not completely healed. Been meaning to move as soon as I get my finances sorted but they’ve been devastated by the lack of work because of Covid.

I have gone most of the last week with barely any social contact. I’ve had maybe one or two evenings with friends over Skype or online video games but that’s it. I text these friends but I’m lucky if I get a response. It’s making my already anxious and lonely brain worry that those who I consider my friends merely tolerate my presence and that by texting them (not excessively) I’m ending up just annoying them. Am I reading too much into this because of my anxieties and recent rejection?

I’ve never been the easiest person to get to know due to mild social anxiety and being something of an introvert but I do still crave and need connection. I was already feeling lonely before this forced isolation and I don’t know if I can bare this if people don’t get back in touch with me.

Sorry for the ranting nature of this... but I’d just like to know if this is all in my head or not I guess? Thanks",2.7833926737418686,4.85424469291339,4.001208490243069,86.04555460458748,76.48031496062994,7.0945566586785365,26.397808969530978,8.04050195162591,1.7089498801780212,1008,39,198,17,23,329,146,254,0.20199999999999999,0.715,0.08199999999999999,-0.9842,0,8,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,1,10,13,3,0,7,0,15,3,2,1,2,45,33,24,0,6,18,1,2,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,14,13,0,0,5,3,1,3,7,6,0,2,6,2,27,7,29,26,4,26,0,3,0,0,13,9,0,11,15,133,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521099785072193,0.266821784395568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442580370749454,0.0,0.1849690395946773,0.13657719807486607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296096920366206,0.0,0.2210898297045952,0.0,0.10287293609986092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495905877138262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267563481872789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707728988766063,0.0,0.0,0.07985015901092643,0.0,0.0,0.11552057280665955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06112826061939367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28021006366226303,0.0,0.25265107095645123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317972533681585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935901028833472,0.12407338392217362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949686334185096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993225696395864,0.19709149571458728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05906330256576301,0.0,0.10675270270718444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069850457556807,0.0,0.12145550763283758,0.1316903467681894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569849931631599,0.08887190419526514,0.08964228094685503,0.09324185408062564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192173642158809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381353012831404,0.10556105140668566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120927945642087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11936945439586105,0.0,0.0,0.10324386558298468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464749239188048,0.0,0.09307105421110684,0.0,0.1353323117840375,0.0,0.0,0.19309417317196334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130408469929416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809707262951424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975122565539384,0.0,0.0,0.09697486095824152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801316705935827,0.1227749741300691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778525642055367
mentalhealth,duckytat2019,2020/03/28,"111 told me to self isolate away from dad Hi all, 

So spoke to 111 because I was struggling to breathe, since my dad is high risk they have suggested that one of us go stay with friends or family. Problem is that isnt an option.

So for the next 12 weeks I'll be in my room, not able to see my family or anyone. The pure thought of that si making me extremely depressed and I just thrive on human contact and I dont know what to do.


My mental is gunna take a massive nose dive and I'm so so scared of myself",1.6506931702344545,3.009982917431195,3.314984709480125,92.86699286442408,77.62385321100919,6.312334352701327,23.120285423037714,6.937597516519254,0.5579594291539247,394,12,91,4,9,131,78,109,0.15,0.823,0.027000000000000003,-0.9183,0,0,0,1,0,0,7.0,1,0,1,0,5,6,0,3,4,0,9,2,2,1,2,15,18,9,0,1,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,4,3,12,1,14,13,1,9,0,1,1,0,12,5,0,3,2,56,16,0,0.20179773771532894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110167024166506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895956173588666,0.0,0.0,0.12301402789238053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17380809579709114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23650544569123785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3804738951585542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15590843157793122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468630477431205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132103893608608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090275918157903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347015569100961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033646562826007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21461418340567276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367433696424078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193093181613798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020347393530207,0.0,0.1608066701179398,0.0,0.21051905088836134,0.0,0.0,0.16692917395840234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150895383611749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21096281044634288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15172678472360104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16020486271993198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928263862390614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427378317714414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16186997294334027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Some-person2020,2020/03/28,Mental health question Hay i was wondering if its a thing that kids can recognize that they are being abused (mental/verbal)or not?,6.231739130434782,8.980478478260874,5.312391304347828,77.45815217391308,68.56521739130434,8.078260869565218,28.89130434782609,8.841846274778883,2.711278260869565,107,4,16,2,2,32,21,23,0.14800000000000002,0.852,0.0,-0.5106,0,0,0,0,1,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,13,6,0,0.0,0.3850527458923448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34544265840247385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.655014610764569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640563120580737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21590484367673574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3524311456854173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Catbatlover,2020/03/28,"I can't get help My mental health has gotten really bad this year and I finally decided to reach out and get some help. A week ago, I texted my school counselor that I needed help.  He gave me a number I could call for assistance.  I called the number and the person who answered said it wasn't the right number to call and gave me another number.  I called that number (it was a therapy service) and told them what was up.  She said I could talk to her for a bit and on Monday (this was on a Friday) She would call me back.  A whole week passed and I still never got a call back.  It was very difficult to even reach out in the first place, but reaching out out three times in a row was even harder and I'm not even getting help.  I am emotionally unstable and have been isolating myself from everyone (not just because of the pandemic).  I asked my parents about therapy before (not telling them about my real problems because I don't trust telling them about my feelings) they just said if you're stressed talk to your friends, do yoga, play an instrument etc. No one can help me with what I'm going through so my best option in my opinion is to stay away from everyone to avoid hurting others and getting hurt.",5.213750000000001,5.624401208333335,5.596666666666668,83.435,68.16666666666666,8.9,29.333333333333336,8.841846274778883,2.1229083333333336,950,32,192,15,15,304,134,240,0.166,0.741,0.09300000000000001,-0.9667,1,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,4,2,12,11,0,2,14,0,18,1,0,0,1,36,36,13,0,6,7,1,1,0,1,1,1,3,0,1,11,15,0,1,3,2,0,2,8,7,0,3,15,4,32,4,28,18,5,28,0,2,0,0,35,13,0,4,12,136,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791940931890757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368027536752124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352039035196769,0.0,0.08393741901334409,0.13739315108166048,0.07459476668253846,0.10892108317227472,0.0,0.07602135053485116,0.0,0.09375631342008496,0.0,0.09753561605694563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.547353826169133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426606726580541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004949341472476,0.0,0.0,0.09963717956270683,0.17702372923061102,0.0,0.0,0.17073547800360167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04517274517781502,0.0,0.0,0.09786707622495322,0.0,0.07599214925462025,0.0,0.0,0.06902349079251065,0.0,0.1867048453787828,0.0,0.05077370749932751,0.0,0.07145297469508255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496373103315596,0.0,0.0,0.2994119820747157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19127960578815306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900332223111858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624412134975206,0.06890414468876298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060538770225084026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992009632724493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800782203810303,0.09334078244739008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08548585415378614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168793157510632,0.05723318356487993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762954611156252,0.2549470234474656,0.0,0.0,0.0904163628757563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095224040293273,0.07134665530831936,0.0,0.10233811721131836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361544256384276,0.15617335487584738,0.0,0.2043350520725152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520945920004466,0.0,0.0,0.08536773900180084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371445959769768,0.0,0.0,0.14332554659115826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974438250778432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346423104858069,0.0,0.0,0.0575317211492918
mentalhealth,iamtheexistentialist,2020/03/28,"Freedom in Imagination Today's pandemic has immobilized people from going in and out of their homes. Yet no virus could stop a person's mind from wandering. Let it take you to the farthest corner of the earth. Feed your thoughts with beautiful things. Water your soul with happy memories. 🌞🌊🏖 

#covid19 #mentalhealth #quarantine #day6",4.202068965517242,7.591288775862073,4.5306034482758655,75.49349137931038,83.65517241379311,8.417241379310347,27.9396551724138,8.841846274778883,3.3780620689655163,271,12,41,8,8,85,51,58,0.10099999999999999,0.7190000000000001,0.18,0.802,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,9,6,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,4,2,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,10,3,0,9,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571207649911745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18302135088002736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34281494123976586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230299020842289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32930519533613345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3251661048929254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22326027648764907,0.2811907515087702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692377967655152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421321461131987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21394742677777095,0.0,0.0,0.25566182858756403,0.0,0.0,0.3052539256201613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ifeeloldeventhoim18,2020/03/28,"Being depressed is not a trend.... Hey guys so I saw that this girl who goes to my school  posted a picture of  her new hair(she dyed it pink btw) and captioned the photo ""When depressed , dye your hair"". To be honest I was kinda mad cuz i struggled w depression and anxiety my whole life and watching someone pretend they're depressed just cuz they think it's cool and trendy completely blows my mind.I don't get how some people can be so insensitive knowing that mental health is such a serious topic.I thought about texting her to change the caption but she's kinda superficial and immature so i was like meh she will prolly think I'm overreacting for no reason.",2.7987064116985363,5.5218649842519705,3.7431327334083266,84.38340551181103,80.25984251968505,6.463217097862768,26.394263217097865,7.7094869923839395,1.7879633295838024,531,22,96,9,14,170,94,127,0.177,0.764,0.059000000000000004,-0.8379,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,0,8,10,1,1,5,1,10,3,1,4,0,19,17,13,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,6,5,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,7,0,0,4,5,13,3,6,9,2,3,0,4,3,0,10,0,0,3,3,59,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399657342973678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19354995798964766,0.0,0.19183259414399695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6303409839807025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559030188221204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18116154012644956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19448047422452489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055134950431543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923175311845514,0.08938618626944002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438306478215447,0.0,0.1847398660782258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17670622487882326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12684309021845194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17522740257891145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18811581831824864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851677154891313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15502344677387905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19127202462899848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234469834915518,0.0,0.1452517075546163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20427098430424448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lilblueyed11,2020/03/28,Feeling lonely more then ever During these times of self isolation I’ve been finding it harder to deal with depression and recently had people who I have been calling friends telling me that I’m ungrateful and just been criticized by everything I do and I’ve not felt this alone in ages. They have been really unsupportive and I don’t feel like they are there for me but expect me to be there for them and if I’m not I’m the bad person. There’s been nights where I’d just sit in a dark room and cry and I’m battling so hard not to completely shut myself even more away from people and not self harm.,5.851080139372819,5.604538056910571,6.132775842044133,82.39024390243901,66.8048780487805,9.955400696864114,28.953542392566785,9.606745405546679,2.2699347270615573,483,14,101,9,7,155,81,123,0.158,0.7440000000000001,0.098,-0.7026,0,4,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,3,0,9,7,1,0,2,0,12,0,0,0,1,23,19,12,0,2,8,0,4,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,5,9,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,7,4,10,2,12,11,2,13,0,2,0,0,11,6,0,1,7,67,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20629785999348307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871429244470591,0.0,0.1663129859067623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033923942794696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088439819224209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187977781457455,0.0,0.20535324946362574,0.1715596372593108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13156126224417342,0.1801762195407433,0.0,0.0,0.17901660519563425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014300591380857,0.1422993703130128,0.191250941780442,0.0,0.18205348560978726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15389153102743794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843260036833244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731280105275716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869236871023724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761826389177812,0.17392257371692008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276044161668138,0.0,0.19667332273651245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4155913663394051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740983860102256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116147653924051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Silversky24,2020/03/28,"I have several mental health and personal health issues, is this what's stopping me from being a normal individual? From progressing in life? I look at all my friends, they are all married for years, 2 kids, big houses and they all look like moms and more mature than me. I was married for 12 years, ran away from my life when it got to be too much for me. I had a house. My ex is still in love with me. It seems like something is stopping me from being a normal productive member of society though. There are stages everyone goes through and I was miserable in mine. I was happy with the house, I was happy that we had money and no real worries. 3 years ago though, I needed out so bad that I wanted to commit suicide. I started over, I remarried last year... literally started from scratch all over again. Apartment living, a 24 year old husband (I'm 30) and I look at all of my friends from my old life and think that I'm a failure. I look like I'm in my early 20s and I have my body, but I dont have the kids, the house, the long term husband.. I feel like I have failed my family, and at life. 

I suffer from Depression, BPD, Anxiety, ADD. I struggle with black and white thinking.",2.6277731092436944,4.318179466386557,3.9745294117647054,87.7623823529412,75.76470588235293,6.944873949579833,24.92521008403361,7.734863291789972,1.2367388235294117,915,31,191,13,20,301,126,238,0.147,0.7559999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.9314,0,0,1,0,0,2,38.0,1,0,2,2,8,15,0,2,9,0,19,8,1,0,6,34,37,15,1,4,1,4,2,4,2,0,6,0,0,3,7,16,0,2,4,0,1,1,2,6,0,0,8,8,36,9,30,26,8,34,0,4,6,1,13,13,0,1,23,128,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357205877277188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212267100659124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857760260313982,0.0,0.07871847475354705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472198069630063,0.11874026714433415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120179492114835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049351073482096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008699277765436,0.0,0.0,0.08887722711024737,0.0,0.04766996076228276,0.0673524639603929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567842112773366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540299989861547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007220891565836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20042693063576544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4351381789429044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840209125627987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768494291518677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663663148857611,0.1842385363019796,0.0,0.08324950027622094,0.08343336292796119,0.3166802393969517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850898814925143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501039084478556,0.0,0.0,0.11041765076057028,0.0,0.0,0.06930542670330055,0.06990619350327743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184745509356374,0.0,0.0,0.1978585141531221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232020881329523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073093895246302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582745864888949,0.0,0.10650768739828677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258007110609918,0.0,0.0,0.13346138667125595,0.0,0.07529080302026944,0.15764182521115014,0.0,0.0985601895659208,0.0,0.1031252004759614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12081950521299616,0.1852559780683116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055607806795973394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957442292659288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035607952292693
mentalhealth,JCDallas88,2020/03/28,"I'm Not Okay With Being Alone, I'm Confused?  Hello everyone. I'm a 26 year old male. I'm not sure if this is going to make sense to anyone, and really it doesn't make sense to me either. But I know I absolutely need help.  


Basically, for my entire life, I have been searching for the right woman, to have a long-term relationship with. I always felt that real love and a happy/healthy relationship was the one missing piece in my life that would make me feel completely happy with myself. I've had relationships with 8 different women before, most of them were happy relationships, but not very long-term, as they all failed to last about 7 months or so. I decided after my most recent relationship, which ended well over a month ago now, to finally take some time and focus on myself. I deleted all of my online dating apps, all social media (except twitter which I use for news) The problem is, I literally never did this willingly before. Pretty much, since middle school, all I did was either try and find that relationship, the one that lasts for what I hoped to be an eternity, or be in a relationship that I thought had potential. There were times where I probably was desperate, honestly. Whether it was in school, online dating apps, wherever, I would always hope to try to find that one person that I would make a connection with and hopefully begin to build a long-term relationship with. I thought that a happy and healthy relationship was the key to real happiness for myself. When I was in a relationship, I felt completely fine and happy, no worries at all. Heck, even when I was just talking to a new female, or even just looking on an online dating app or something, I was always feeling completely fine, none of these issues (that I will describe below) at all, because I knew what I was looking for, I had a goal in mind and I was going to do whatever it took to reach that goal, no matter how long it took, of finding that right woman for myself, and finally truly be happy.  


Now, like I said, I decided I was going to take time to focus on myself for awhile, and wow, let me tell you, it's not going well at all. Couldn't be worse, honestly. I've learned that I'm simply not okay when I'm willingly alone. It's been just over a month of not talking to pretty much anyone outside of a close group of 3 friends, and my parents. I'm experiencing crazy anxiety, OCD, intrusive thoughts, I feel violated (I don't know why) confused, insecure, I'm questioning literally everything (including my own sexuality which I know I'm 100% straight, and I'm sure of it, but I still question the possibility of what if I wasn't, even though I know I'm definitely straight. It's like H-OCD, but I can somewhat stop those thoughts temporarily when I know they are coming)  
I find myself extremely bored out of my mind during this stay-at-home initiative here we have in New Jersey with the Coronavirus going around, I find myself not feeling worthy to even think someone would want to date me at this state I'm in, and especially at a time like this where we can't even go anywhere or do anything, I feel like I'm really just losing my mind. I'm somewhat able to control the intrusive thoughts, well when they start to come I'm aware they are just thoughts and I let them be, I don't fight them, but they never truly go away, they only go to the back of my mind and eventually come back to focus, and it's like a repeating cycle. (To keep the thoughts away I treat it like a food I don't like, I say like I dont like \_ and it goes away temporarily. I also dont put meaning on the thoughts because they are just thoughts and don't mean anything to me)  


I know I want a relationship with a woman, that leads to engagement, a wife, and kids, a family, I know for a fact that's what I want in life, more than anything in the world. I want it too much, honestly, and I'm scared that because I'm not looking and the state I'm in right now, I won't be able to find it. I'm currently seeing a therapist, but she hasn't been much help yet, though it's only been two appointments though, I'm still holding out hope  


People close to me would always tell me, ""you need to love yourself before you can love anyone else"" and when it was said this way, that never made sense, until now. Recently, I read something online that is basically exactly what was said here, but in a different way. Basically, it said ""love doesn't fill a void in yourself, you have to find something else that fills that void and be completely happy with yourself to love someone."" That's when something clicked. It made me feel better inside, knowing this is the right mindset for the long-term, but in the short term, it made me feel worse, because for literally my entire life I thought that real love was the one missing piece to be happy. If it's not love that's my one missing piece, then what could it possibly be? The other night, I came up with possible solutions, and I basically narrowed it down to my dream job, which is a technical director in tv production. I absolutely loved doing this when I was back in college, it was my favorite thing to do, I did it as often as I could. It's been 3 years since then, and It's an extremely hard job to land. And if I don't get that job, I'm happy with what I have, but its not very fulfilling, super slow paced. I'm happy to have multiple jobs in my field for sure, but not the most ideal job that I wanted.  


I guess I'm just writing to you all to find out why do I feel violated in a situation like this, why can't I just accept being alone, and be happy with myself? why I fear being alone in general? is there a way to permanently keep these intrusive thoughts away, instead of only temporarily? I didn't always feel this way, and I know this won't last, so I know there's a way out of this, I just don't know how to get back there.  


Any advice would be greatly appreciated, I'm sorry if I sound like a crazy, irrational person here (I know I do) but I'm just trying to figure this all out, because I'm just lost.. Thank you!",5.830178205406448,5.658174630615642,6.744179266439992,77.73759880874873,66.8369384359401,9.996402131712848,30.73143794159493,9.68966264156612,2.6446192191757705,4734,160,950,91,69,1583,370,1202,0.087,0.7090000000000001,0.204,0.9995,10,4,4,0,1,0,169.0,2,6,10,10,60,73,3,5,51,2,97,13,0,12,17,230,224,72,0,27,47,2,12,11,1,11,4,6,0,8,79,54,1,5,53,3,0,18,35,16,3,6,56,24,123,57,128,138,28,143,0,6,5,8,67,57,1,26,72,637,202,15,0.0594392295019003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029041663572733262,0.026344645297773653,0.0,0.0,0.12312223166054287,0.0,0.02376676517893377,0.1236455013074478,0.0,0.0,0.020210357159660998,0.0,0.022735423938314098,0.0,0.0,0.062341936947978176,0.030451257413932526,0.07337013199422901,0.026456758052572527,0.0,0.0,0.1116902254736436,0.0914101970445712,0.0,0.09058400652344063,0.0,0.0758676096000037,0.0,0.0,0.02628458410834011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033991321879378734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680244966023353,0.12464180250815406,0.0,0.033333075053326465,0.04745738814314335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062101343834374635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06966233429594512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04965384917349599,0.0,0.02632275742033718,0.0,0.0,0.0981476262532016,0.0,0.0,0.02839836550064308,0.02671007340633234,0.0,0.028017007809217582,0.03344282913954831,0.13524417173329933,0.0212316987163386,0.05707098163774561,0.06511277055274685,0.21730551572920448,0.0,0.035937076125557,0.0,0.022961300633892158,0.0,0.031054544151016324,0.0,0.13512273561404534,0.0,0.0,0.03276598018237938,0.032739506267165264,0.0,0.0,0.34800790790014885,0.026622937289602633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03984086260993936,0.0,0.0,0.1180731330972319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031019556401672036,0.14746065914266224,0.05283231824891463,0.0,0.0,0.19599747638460616,0.07267635793849635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06078063929670147,0.08396737124808916,0.15971452828746766,0.0,0.0,0.13150461916427506,0.07487097394366994,0.033248646923273145,0.03244247023413222,0.0,0.21458490115169715,0.08436425420271386,0.07935229449139945,0.0,0.0,0.06474674613479553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003335515455005,0.0,0.07116573885763403,0.0,0.08738934569859684,0.04407343552391679,0.06876479715619764,0.05740677824221816,0.0,0.027889845181850347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031185736303811086,0.0,0.10069390052459502,0.06780931870568628,0.0,0.0,0.03300011510164815,0.0,0.0,0.02060383881983149,0.051900042523099696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10051320053257357,0.0,0.060471065192166926,0.03204277131003039,0.028437657595015774,0.0,0.029876421437379317,0.06658554034884624,0.0,0.02972765730077744,0.10148228411484587,0.03807829244737458,0.0,0.058689068331049435,0.35098518385906474,0.0,0.10152155444838104,0.11308063740580687,0.023634230507946885,0.02975451899441336,0.060155673564936236,0.023682685145014218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04916874487202148,0.03340609218311332,0.0,0.03029540455925572,0.0503626662693698,0.09151844561715368,0.0,0.03326867553299155,0.021035696286740155,0.03167715500394458,0.04746824546100041,0.024846928688051263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403115555673124,0.0,0.04469090328204644,0.04777500115563076,0.05195250647475149,0.0273618283065064,0.0,0.03450676336495993,0.019744391463614244,0.019043129106961258,0.08759811179424766,0.25953459838979737,0.06931898544035946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06603917102949629,0.060533002707441025,0.0,0.029031745182755874,0.0,0.0,0.025668204979553282,0.0,0.04904358931876236,0.08764699394388611,0.11795023427552255,0.0,0.0,0.08016450853005211,0.0,0.10726931888946237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03018171140402019,0.06057365289787755,0.12667176973002667,0.0,0.0,0.038276915007534655
mentalhealth,thrrowawayy32,2020/03/28,"Does anxiety cause crying spells? I’ve noticed that during my worse times of anxiety (no sleep, stress, etc.) I cry very easily and often once it starts, I can’t stop it. I’ve dealt with this periodically since my teens. One of these spells happened with my significant other recently and while they were understanding of it, it’s still embarrassing for me and hard to explain. The frustrating thing is that most of the time I don’t actually feel the need to cry, it’s just hard to control. Does anyone else go through the same thing dealing with anxiety? And have you learned of amy healthy ways to manage it?",6.730111801242237,7.298121886956526,6.7214906832298125,76.13391304347827,64.91304347826087,10.397515527950313,32.08074534161491,10.290406445055957,3.1083788819875773,487,18,93,11,7,155,78,115,0.244,0.7,0.055999999999999994,-0.9645,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,1,3,3,1,2,4,0,5,1,1,2,0,19,12,5,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,13,7,0,2,4,0,0,1,3,3,0,1,1,3,9,0,14,11,3,10,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,8,58,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.1417750142588069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334227360307649,0.0,0.0,0.10158508220011216,0.14885935402066938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924541217046716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16294696644252216,0.0,0.0,0.4787588622547745,0.0,0.14978014387945782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542758406728217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12136510181061548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16202867863623313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734593275688443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256753926280189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847306286066226,0.0,0.26028962897602986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772532398875756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654053826080018,0.0,0.1547213954706273,0.09844735658800516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434491962200176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017939850830943,0.0,0.14538767920432066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283188369050486,0.0,0.11602299799590715,0.12146289079703697,0.16642090812530616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930388173369863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16943108873558188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512444744729239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987349037195562,0.0,0.11531869073365425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805554198436358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chatty-kat,2020/03/28,"My GP appointment cancelled due to the current situation - is there anywhere I can go for help? I have suffered from depression most of my adult life and have been on antidepressants many years until I’ve decided to stop. Unfortunately the past year has left me drained and my mental heath has been affected so much. I was in a dark place. I still am but my partner is trying his best to help and I am trying my best to help myself. There are things that help me go through the day and sleep at night but nonetheless it is a struggle. 
So I have finally decided that I have to go to a doctor and ask for antidepressants however due to the current situation the appointment has been cancelled. I absolutely understand it but I am a bit worried and scared and was wondering if there is anything I can do or a place where I could go to get a prescription? I’ve tried support such as talking and it is somehow helpful however not enough, my mind is in a very dark place and only my family keeps me going really..",5.356981946624806,6.266165443877554,6.364489795918367,76.28600470957616,68.03061224489795,10.316483516483515,32.93406593406593,10.389873798559362,3.4825452119309266,801,35,153,21,13,267,105,196,0.114,0.737,0.149,0.9361,4,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,9,7,0,2,12,0,26,3,1,1,0,26,37,18,0,2,6,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,6,9,0,2,4,0,0,5,1,4,0,0,5,0,23,3,19,31,6,27,0,2,0,0,10,9,0,5,13,115,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628409683412252,0.0,0.1093826891268076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455763829955109,0.0,0.127737764694214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093417954239779,0.0,0.0,0.07545772355788903,0.0,0.10077513744222673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975827105983387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208961256483546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030069946380584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817186233626648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06112961749362484,0.0,0.3324795681515608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3921256548024304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10399828734088536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271248902507586,0.0,0.08264319162728552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862341333303195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791223587016175,0.0,0.1181404088785172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601120096297635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980007045874676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898660573525638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169329536616644,0.0,0.0,0.3667319709451757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495558269343369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714114082564996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26303417975544885,0.11708822432640305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343932643202182,0.09782035371092307,0.0,0.12231769826618415,0.0,0.0,0.13277444129377114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404316264309467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773207630714038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23831354813980254,0.0,0.0,0.12180500474409095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654032727034093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268855494064289,0.0,0.11882296287838745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069312638227889
mentalhealth,wtfyallohmygod,2020/03/28,Romanticizing mental illness I'm sorry if this seems like a dumb question but I'm curious about it. What is romanticizing mental illness? I've heard about it before but I don't completely know what it means. Could someone inform me about it? Thank you in advance.,2.2027040816326533,5.0479689387755124,3.896709183673469,78.03445153061227,94.3061224489796,5.715306122448982,24.492346938775512,7.1686216300943375,1.7752224489795918,214,9,35,4,8,71,35,49,0.157,0.614,0.22899999999999998,0.6136,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,1,3,5,1,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,9,10,3,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,4,4,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,3,1,21,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346296522537725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891022558865175,0.0,0.0,0.22015146916328085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15153640654158326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470989229384947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30035557882206465,0.0,0.0,0.5557508119373868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3088856152094695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25101822761978804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336288490369372,0.0,0.0,0.3086620685324327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538591749930149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,khz33,2020/03/28,"I keep hearing music and melodies I have never heard before This started recently. I am 17 years old.
I began hearing different melodies and I can even remember a few. I am 100% sure that I never heard these before, they seem to be coming out of my mind, just like when I wrote poems before. I think a piano or a violin would be the best to play them, but I can't play any instruments, neither can I write down music.
Is everything okay with me?",4.3503745318352065,5.129360235955058,5.57477528089888,81.51399812734084,70.23595505617978,8.629962546816481,27.192883895131093,8.841846274778883,2.01423445692884,347,11,68,6,6,116,64,89,0.0,0.838,0.162,0.8793,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,1,3,6,0,0,4,1,10,0,0,0,3,19,21,5,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,3,5,0,1,3,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,4,15,6,6,14,3,11,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,2,9,50,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295032776576391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4861420327029712,0.0,0.19985124557818276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164044090274469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989654984808401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578144160139876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17115195071862846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42927131106307975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926861622075134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303760236024948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19228646972880173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937525727968437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19983095972056072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18803296377943715,0.0,0.21572731003854434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733661399975058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479185921468262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17948404678495325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202395122098075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352805497789904,0.0,0.0,0.12263479346106125
mentalhealth,pocketsockz,2020/03/28,"Coronavirus anxiety I live in Sweden. The government hasn’t put the country in quarintine yet (probably too late by this point.) 

I was home sick for two weeks. My friends barely contacted me. I’m not close to my family either. I barely texted or spoke to anyone for two weeks. 

I’m not sure if I had corona when I was sick. 
I’m afriad I won’t survive it if I get it. 

I’m not sure I can handle being alone for months without contact if the government decide to shut everything down.

I’m not sure I can survive if the economy crashes. I’m afraid for the people around me.

I don’t want to die alone in this cramped apartment and be forgotten. 

I was just starting to get my life in order before all this. 

I hope you all are doing okay.",1.5935999999999986,3.740697826666669,3.5713333333333352,87.26900000000002,80.73333333333333,6.933333333333334,23.333333333333336,8.021203637495839,1.3947333333333338,574,20,117,11,15,194,86,150,0.161,0.774,0.065,-0.9064,1,2,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,1,0,2,5,7,0,1,5,1,13,4,0,0,5,23,25,7,1,6,12,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,1,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,8,1,0,2,5,1,18,6,17,17,3,19,0,0,0,0,5,10,0,6,7,77,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441104843923422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12708505423859567,0.0,0.0,0.1161583565198948,0.0,0.0,0.14788633549174554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14136001022206332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17241136479456154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493023018515276,0.0,0.15660772223548872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12834764569880586,0.0,0.17358675336314952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666367678276631,0.16499945816378006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187396064760856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11733889324307667,0.0,0.0,0.1466912845889006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259926898204716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517005273558732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704167793089835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17911068387986667,0.0,0.0,0.16700135652302425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758402265998096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4697121105211707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245596757906954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798473966819377,0.0,0.2665106656046677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16013842557309255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gobnips,2020/03/28,"Where do I go from here? I'm not diagnosed with low-grade depression, social anxiety, or dysphoria (MTF) at the moment, but I'm pretty sure I would be, the only issue is that I don't want to get diagnosed right now. When it comes to social anxiety, I'll tell my friends I don't want to get diagnosed because ""I just don't see it as an issue that needs to be dealt with"" when, in reality, it's just because I'm scared of the possibility of going outside of my comfort zone as a form of treatment. Being autistic (I've been diagnosed with autism since I was two, so I *know* I have that) doesn't help with this either. I'm pretty sure I have social anxiety because at times it has literally kept me from going out of my room for family events, to get shit that I want to get, etc. When it comes to low-grade depression, I'm pretty sure I have it because I've had a good amount of the symptoms (Low energy/numb, lack of happiness, hopelessness, guilt, etc.) for years now. I've heard it described as a dim grey compared to the dark black of more severe types of depression, which seemed to fit perfectly. I'm also sure that this is connected to my dysphoria (I'm uncomfortable with my facial hair, being called a ""boy"" or a ""man"", I'm disgusted by masculine things to the point that it stops me from doing things that I deem too masculine even if I want to do them, and probably more that I can't remember) which I've had to uncover because I gotten so used to it that I don't even notice it anymore, or ever. I fully realized this when I was on a bus and I felt comfortable with myself and just generally existing, forcing me to realize that I usually don't feel that way, that 24/7 I'm usually just not comfortable with existing. But I don't want to get diagnosed with either of these two probably connected conditions because of two reasons: 1) When it comes to low-grade depression, it's because of how it's not that severe which makes me feel like it's an invalid form of depression and therefore I don't deserve help (I have a history of bad self-esteem if you couldn't tell lol), and 2) I don't want my parents to know and I'm currently still in high school so they kinda have to find out for a formal diagnosis. In general, they're good parents, it's just that I'm emotionally disconnected from them and most of my family (my younger adopted brother with FAS couldn't control himself, and still can't, so I'd have to just sit there as he and my parents would fight a lot of the time, making me emotional disconnect from the general situation), but it's also because of the way specifically my mom interacts with me having issues. One time she suspected I was trans (I didn't know I was at the time btw) and she looked like she was literally about to cry. I don't want them to feel sorry for me, not because of guilt or anything like that, but just because it feels super infantilizing, and I just don't want to deal with that. I don't know what to do about this anymore. Should I go with my current plan and wait it out until I go to university or something?",6.63840457860616,5.669483445705026,7.631146170988657,74.69305637155594,65.43435980551052,11.602289303079415,34.35418354943274,10.9516,3.604448987034037,2414,93,487,60,32,821,238,617,0.153,0.7240000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.9038,5,0,1,0,1,1,80.0,0,1,4,4,33,30,3,3,21,1,46,9,3,7,6,107,98,40,0,17,25,5,6,3,1,3,6,1,1,2,45,30,0,4,16,0,0,8,21,14,0,4,13,11,60,16,82,76,12,51,0,7,4,0,30,17,1,11,26,327,105,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244153354273282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326451520923514,0.0,0.1146394934493528,0.0,0.0,0.0475625484208444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04825863079496838,0.3523291627795446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059017871686461415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14936269561672502,0.0,0.0,0.06482498885367341,0.0,0.0,0.06348801410020027,0.0,0.05958684822102764,0.2489051936827485,0.29331703468766385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300291733444603,0.0,0.0,0.1289193351172235,0.07634961692192706,0.052281291262033416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897297750298997,0.0,0.11689693143267987,0.0412906589154861,0.05549481622407135,0.0,0.05282601294829248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044654327729339284,0.0,0.15098445577140387,0.0,0.16423870690082445,0.09695586783291488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06152668241686057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748110459290836,0.061066399715918686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809772181024996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705632670307013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08471104968788135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04853547658591753,0.0,0.0,0.049137502553013836,0.0,0.0,0.07716077196131704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769191931100027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042856231565948484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658030174970058,0.0,0.0,0.0391651893423998,0.043957723894749896,0.0,0.0,0.19253238024501998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05463746931477162,0.06515817591333488,0.0,0.17640299255832298,0.12463130327402752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05942561931810024,0.0,0.0,0.06547348031371858,0.04935888471882177,0.0,0.0,0.057865539230133885,0.0584943162623553,0.04605725088653037,0.05261681774163871,0.0602955632129455,0.13058980573675874,0.0593284660689333,0.04781082053154022,0.06496698999269186,0.0,0.17675230320599766,0.0,0.04449546139642352,0.0,0.06469974693761213,0.0,0.0,0.09231456977761504,0.048321430671311616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21789443722635826,0.060073897705469524,0.0,0.0,0.10103540245711803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767963924422645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480911831057762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16937974263076794,0.0,0.0,0.04991861984024463,0.12731191090703936,0.0,0.2727244526407841,0.09175418241451293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211559687274836,0.0,0.0,0.03721979722463106
mentalhealth,mattd21,2020/03/28,"Serial Addictions How do people break the cycle? For me I went from pot to booze to gaming. I just keep letting things destroy my life over and over again.

Are there resources out there for this specifically? I keep putting everything back together again then I just have something else fill the hole left behind and the cycle continues. 

I’ve had professional help several times but i can’t seem to keep it together for long. I just suck at the maintenance of life I guess because as soon as I get comfortable again I just screw everything up all over again.",3.67708041958042,6.511435134615389,3.9818881118881135,83.35402097902099,77.46153846153847,8.397202797202798,25.8006993006993,9.095868883498916,2.4803192307692314,450,17,82,12,11,140,71,104,0.079,0.86,0.062,-0.1926,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,13,4,3,0,4,0,6,5,0,1,1,15,14,7,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,1,3,1,1,0,3,1,3,0,0,2,0,11,1,17,11,1,21,0,0,0,1,2,7,2,2,10,59,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21395696546940265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15091506767892335,0.0,0.11964084460684325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16395356865675273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3527792448678505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253995251762947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21620716129403503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155176712361694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5233459597695655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132416452872635,0.20069345848926148,0.2772544404110163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368765536379518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606489562315918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19729974593655736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786715713644431,0.0,0.22172270004747507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109378232111434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303892244125718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444324284811767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18193889481076547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lostandconfused010,2020/03/28,"Postpartum is a b*tch I’m nearly 6 weeks postpartum with my second baby boy. He’s such a blessing. I have a 4 yo as well. 

I haven’t left my house in over a month except for taking a walk down our short street and sitting in my garage to watch my son ride his bike. My husband works all day, comes home to sleep for an hour then leaves for the gym and isn’t back until after dinner and it’s time to get ready for bed. I haven’t slept more than 3-4 hours in a few days. I barely eat (idk how my milk supply is still even here). I’m having those crazy thoughts that women can get about their babies even though it disgusts me as soon as I snap out of it and Id NEVER harm myself or my children. 

My husband is out riding in the desert with his friends this weekend even though I’ve told him all of this and told him I needed him. 

I keep being told to call my doc and get my meds but idk how to say it (I’m ashamed of myself and embarrassed. I should have been better prepared)

With not being able to have friends come over it’s unbearable. My dishes aren’t done, laundry is still on the table. Sheets haven’t been changed. I can’t go grocery shopping. Everything is slipping away from me and I feel stuck and so so so alone.",1.3328217503217488,3.1380492239382214,2.468943050193051,96.58261663449166,79.92664092664094,5.088867438867439,19.28587516087516,5.7366,-0.3603630630630628,955,22,219,5,24,304,153,259,0.079,0.851,0.07,-0.5132,1,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,1,2,18,9,1,2,10,0,22,6,2,2,3,30,41,23,0,2,4,3,1,0,2,1,0,1,2,3,9,16,4,1,2,4,1,6,8,4,1,1,9,3,32,5,37,29,4,38,1,0,1,0,21,15,0,1,16,146,41,1,0.13425679255187215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13904954735360914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613867606584128,0.1032351862951588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873922274960964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13709119600474992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420258847044759,0.23130067774919416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731690488172551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373913117433264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737821602556974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660260358236339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066134821766465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678842682794827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207452929774406,0.0,0.21043089859076966,0.0,0.07630122915622745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467050955928764,0.0,0.26443179338437994,0.1549143129428451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193336059471002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215855816192502,0.1458703979376824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14912903049778084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071624909303893,0.0,0.0,0.0995497105155718,0.10354711508472746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676639011032638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435375120181955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21443529591698807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094439953501867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638132340464928,0.10658489665693227,0.07828621540152242,0.0,0.0,0.3848643561952824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769270074022427,0.0,0.12071298009673233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977405439684449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mememaker13,2020/03/28,"Porn addiction I've had an addiction to porn since 7th grade and I watch porn an hour to an hour and a half each day for the past 5 years. If started off normal, but  my fantasies soon grew more and more twisted until eventually I couldn't get off to porn unless it was degrading/violent in some way. Now all my fantasies have become so fucked up and perverse by most normal standards that it scares me. Everytime I try to quit I do it again the next day, as if my reptilian brain controls my mind. I log into the same websites each day, and think the same thoughts of regret whenever I'm finished. The idea that most people I know would not want to be friends with me anymore if they knew how fucked my fantasies are keeps me up in the middle of the night and I don't know how far I can go like this before I snap. I just uninstalled some apps and deleted some group chats, but I fear I'll fall into the same dopamine trap over and over again.",7.536979166666669,5.6579633229166735,7.049791666666668,82.5160416666667,64.20833333333334,10.2,33.83333333333333,8.515128840125781,2.3944333333333336,746,24,160,8,9,233,118,192,0.17,0.794,0.036000000000000004,-0.9842,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,2,8,7,2,2,12,0,10,9,1,3,1,48,23,19,0,9,8,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,6,13,0,2,6,4,0,3,3,5,0,1,4,1,20,2,23,16,13,32,0,1,1,6,4,12,2,8,17,107,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357169327397333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15270454466616534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700563182387697,0.13102371714999828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718900831811248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17269913025676106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979087153159728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732677677197708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896282124266434,0.2846998819875135,0.08044701481667675,0.0,0.08750909899974534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032741181478764,0.0,0.0,0.1738221280909017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13686249163089775,0.0,0.0,0.1692442798931209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522574685541382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15547362494930533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637570750871651,0.1444976798028901,0.3017309884993426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698917735224706,0.10674877845631864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16377428174262884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541585810286849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273719790572891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898623806095152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09866271950241873,0.0,0.1222411273916924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454077921784748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09082006145255528,0.12222036425007922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938136983293012,0.0,0.0,0.09915661726585162
mentalhealth,U_Catherine85,2020/03/28,"Things mentally strong people do!! I usually spend my time talking about the bad habits that rob you of mental strength. After all, it only takes one bad habit to hold you back from reaching your greatest potential. But in addition to giving up those bad habits, it's also important to perform exercises that strengthen your mental muscle, because with hard work and dedication, you can train your brain to perform at its peak.  Continue reading [Here](https://www.healtheyo.com/2020/03/15/10-things-mentally-strong-people-do/)",11.755975609756101,13.586986060975613,8.362097560975613,64.3207073170732,54.2439024390244,11.438048780487804,39.57073170731707,11.20814326018867,5.0387873170731705,435,19,55,10,5,122,65,82,0.156,0.6459999999999999,0.198,0.4738,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,6,0,5,3,5,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,0,1,6,4,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,8,2,12,4,2,8,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,5,37,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561136615709674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010857028831714,0.4889900416237452,0.11900147817067913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21792491551208096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18726837197455096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17487462811043647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.590193536134115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228298752823806,0.14847008630298714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13533775826728794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19526819894130285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14677766405624146,0.15690672049416268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12969241811702262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383165264609832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150021512149303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14211911501140667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaffeinatedAloe,2020/03/28,"i can’t stop the mean and negative thoughts in my head it’s really become debilitating because the thoughts just flood in and it just makes me curl up in a ball and cry. i don’t know what to do. does anyone have any recommendations? i have so much schoolwork and financial stuff that i really need to do but i can’t because of this

context: i have bipolar 2 and generalized anxiety",2.962518796992484,5.148188710526316,4.791654135338348,80.04657894736842,76.36842105263158,8.553383458646618,27.962406015037594,9.23628265651192,2.571103759398497,306,13,61,8,7,104,51,76,0.11800000000000001,0.882,0.0,-0.7227,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,8,2,1,1,0,16,14,7,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,8,0,7,12,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,43,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16759146430670727,0.0,0.1885302154412662,0.0,0.0,0.17232049914291453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004619102196289,0.27217981160394744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707089280107754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21566621218266072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529242931966593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13544006095579886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645043569103081,0.0,0.0,0.268451514936192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811658781526273,0.1827362955075149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3157587339570589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20603956325256206,0.0,0.0,0.2821212593741655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3913005687564001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aymen_Zch,2020/03/28,"I wanna cut my finger So I (19,M) had this weird obsession of cutting my finger for like a year. I always imagine scenarios where it gets cut or I cut it in the kitchen.. and keep imagining the feeling and how would it be like living without a finger and how would it feel like, one time I held a knife and started pushing it against my finger to kinda feel that pain.. do I need help? And is there a specific term for this ""obsession""? 
Ps. Sorry for poor English",3.5206677018633528,4.892191097826085,4.67049689440994,84.98630434782609,72.80434782608695,7.431055900621117,28.360248447204967,7.957251820313856,1.8242248447204967,359,14,71,5,7,118,59,92,0.17300000000000001,0.7070000000000001,0.12,-0.4828,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,6,11,4,2,6,0,6,6,4,2,0,21,14,9,0,4,2,0,7,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,8,5,1,2,5,0,1,1,1,8,0,1,2,7,9,3,9,9,1,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,7,50,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21106572661322134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3847748748808526,0.1812150005221045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252706035738746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002318173216574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22546496884145906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3717768937724573,0.0,0.22398673112971465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18808593104543725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17188681395610875,0.0,0.2699124905262804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839519877625907,0.17954209714981414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479113865380427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445195198399001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36038606118215866,0.0,0.0,0.1633489450313544
mentalhealth,VoorheesVisions,2020/03/28,"Cutting ties with a parent Has anyone ever cut ties with a parent before? 
I have recently severed all ties with my father. Throughout my life he has caused me severe anxiety and depression and has never been there for me.

A year ago I decided to cut ties with my father and some days I don’t even think about him but some days like today I feel really depressed and sad about the situation but I know what I did was for the best. Is this a normal thing to experience with something like this?",4.532798232695144,5.8259035463917535,5.507069219440354,80.26072164948455,70.23711340206185,8.429455081001473,25.19734904270987,8.841846274778883,1.8144916053019151,392,11,74,7,7,129,62,97,0.19899999999999998,0.687,0.114,-0.6243,2,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,3,0,6,0,9,1,0,1,3,22,12,6,0,1,2,4,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,9,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,3,1,12,3,11,9,4,8,0,3,0,0,6,0,0,2,10,56,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026615823299573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830966441973735,0.0,0.0,0.1264178813635481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384543598240408,0.0,0.1897359204057205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572893185884648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331989820248832,0.0,0.3114414052912147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941510558593725,0.1635417744822205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17685473910985128,0.0,0.0,0.09141669580333243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936162930668906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770268734641302,0.1766571438180764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944225018440928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1771432549953561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4015086640042759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158235681982962,0.0,0.17851581232877606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4084996380911372,0.0,0.0,0.2032240705938572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13918682070618044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011388768970165,0.11584779784321245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17137497884872946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642772274840413
mentalhealth,SocialObserver3802,2020/03/28,"Keeping your cool with coronavirus Very interesting [interview](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lb1o9yxsoNI) with a clinical psychologist who speaks about dealing with coronavirus-related stress in a productive manner. He raised some good points which, I think, almost anyone can relate to. Given the pressures no shortage of us are feeling nowadays, learning how to channel our anxieties about the virus into positive behavior seems especially important.",12.96769230769231,16.750061153846154,9.812307692307693,47.86769230769236,52.84615384615384,13.2,48.384615384615394,12.340626583579946,7.8965999999999985,385,23,37,13,5,112,58,65,0.149,0.6409999999999999,0.21,0.669,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,2,1,0,0,3,5,0,2,4,1,2,1,0,1,0,12,7,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,4,3,10,6,1,3,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,3,0,25,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3095890885203216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365141984429641,0.0,0.0,0.21617884769656412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187406872192404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15632563800179386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259317121694108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274804495320359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922655759994503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814567500541348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3541531824552161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19810364780524975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3718934345343963,0.0,0.0,0.25509762316209383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CleophasX,2020/03/28,"A short verse about my conflicted emotions. everyday of my life-it is consuming me

The sweet and bitter pain of growing up is so bleak

The peace that I seek is slowly turning around

I can't feel, going numb hit the ground

I wan't this happiness to last but I worry

I can't do this anymore I am sorry, it hurts.

But I can do this it won't be all that bad

Time heals all, although it may seem sad

It's been a long time and it'll be a long time till I'm okay

This pain won't last, I just need to try

This is all great, it is not time to die.",1.5242056932966008,2.262107958677685,3.2087052341597837,96.00376492194677,76.85123966942149,6.700091827364558,20.882460973370065,6.937597516519254,0.08563838383838407,417,9,107,4,9,139,73,121,0.21600000000000005,0.639,0.145,-0.8906,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,11,1,0,6,1,18,4,0,0,3,15,25,7,1,1,4,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,13,3,0,1,2,0,0,2,5,7,0,0,1,3,11,4,9,17,3,16,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,2,10,67,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17970798678271527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16131205078973276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15129971572816772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18806356072038724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038327304287786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09162336458737468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298373267667377,0.0,0.0,0.199780617445735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19289750674689365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939851230013841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954146868559753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279913890860776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207237978827013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343621969022916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3856326201210548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496343629502191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028456497436672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4226514706687855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302720270052495,0.1971004512533164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18402382307203946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thehumansensepodcast,2020/03/28,"Podcast stories Hello, 

Looking for moderator approval for this. Starting a podcast on mental health and wanted to see if anyone was interested in sharing stories with about their own relationship with mental health. There is also a quick survey regarding mental health and podcasts. 

[human sense ](https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/SMNXRFH)",10.24125,15.044910625000005,8.180000000000003,50.66500000000002,67.75,7.366666666666666,37.16666666666667,8.344100000000001,4.558016666666667,282,14,25,5,6,84,38,48,0.0,0.833,0.16699999999999998,0.8225,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,6,6,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,2,8,5,1,4,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,1,2,21,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399376774817126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143389155007653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6539369207539095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722064827299372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6199845722486709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22016757928172195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341360458961565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14514903754451522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095512923567217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Korru,2020/03/28,"Today... I once again fantasized about shooting myself with a shotgun through my mouth and into my brain splattering my worthless existence into nothingness.

The day before this I wished I knew how to cry.",9.658857142857146,10.395787600000002,8.429285714285715,65.79821428571432,58.71428571428571,11.571428571428573,40.35714285714286,11.20814326018867,5.078142857142859,166,8,23,4,2,51,30,35,0.171,0.8290000000000001,0.0,-0.7184,0,0,0,2,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,7,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,7,0,6,1,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,20,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32282559033076913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4235150611047396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41673260406940665,0.24466958852561516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4040287613856113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3596091646234589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4362698351860957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hypr1s,2020/03/28,"idk if this is for this sub but honestly i dont really care at this particular moment (bit heavy) So my brother came to my house about 5 hours beating the door drunk as fuck and yelling shit. Pretty usual for this life. After a while he left. Later other family members told me he came over with a car and left with it. No one knows where he is for the past 5 hours. But they are just talking in group chat as if nothing happened when someone could be dead but i guess we all seen this shit before. Im just feeling atm that some lives dont matter at fucking all. Lately been feeling like the whole fucking world is about to end and havent been able to sleep at all, million different things going on but nothing really matters. I feel like I’ve been dead for a while now just hope this shitty simulation of an life ends soon. Probably deleting this after a while for whatever reason as usual",3.2110299625468173,5.060125533707868,4.086314606741578,86.90156928838955,74.56179775280899,6.769138576779027,24.22621722846442,7.554174236665415,1.1186010486891391,707,22,140,9,15,227,115,178,0.23,0.667,0.10300000000000001,-0.9843,1,0,0,0,1,1,12.0,1,0,1,1,10,10,5,0,8,0,12,9,3,1,3,31,28,17,2,4,9,1,3,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,11,8,1,0,5,2,1,4,4,5,0,2,7,5,8,5,24,19,6,32,0,0,1,3,10,10,5,5,20,91,19,0,0.11458446366190593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750293903175357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250965572029023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262108201559598,0.1168264973574966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914863704113648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11971637646679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685842760623965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20297564866754286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802003458433093,0.0,0.17381204311610804,0.16371832747024803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3177944707979497,0.0,0.0,0.06512099129906246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262277050902487,0.0,0.10132666279522087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380822684111855,0.225685230848922,0.1322150866612598,0.0,0.0,0.12377088354754358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297262458597642,0.0,0.1292562659585636,0.0,0.2489927100765532,0.0,0.16186879069916005,0.11196036212076953,0.0,0.10118018069815343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21989376648734646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07764539804653528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938383606760574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657359340243588,0.12354143199933493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468114830493934,0.1178119126599132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352386106519165,0.0,0.0,0.11466721519119864,0.0,0.09708704422009383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09209865150909924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612482615093866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949036543826424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25239719670499633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792946163141247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheGreaterShade,2020/03/28,"Is this emptiness normal? I feel nothing, I can function but I can't bring myself to do or pursue anything. 

When I am at work I feel fine, work is work and I can do that. But when it comes to anything I want to do, or I am interested in... I just can't. It's just a void of wanting but not knowing where to start. 

I used to be an avid writer, but now if I sit down to write I just can't get anything.  Even things like art and video games, anything I would typically really enjoy, struggles to hold my attention. 

I feel like an observer of my life, I feel tired and empty. Everything just feels disconnected, like I have forgotten how to interact with people, how to bond with others around me. I find myself lashing out at the littlest things for no good reason. 

I don't know if it's this quarantine, or the weather getting to me, but I feel nothing. No emotion, no desire, just nothing.",2.613594040968344,4.286617435754192,4.226011173184356,86.01875605214153,75.75977653631284,7.007970204841714,26.458472998137804,7.793537801064563,1.5093594785847295,687,26,141,10,15,230,98,179,0.10400000000000001,0.715,0.18100000000000002,0.9393,0,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,3,13,8,0,1,5,0,16,2,0,4,0,45,32,17,0,7,16,0,6,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,8,0,1,11,3,0,2,8,1,0,0,0,6,25,7,21,30,0,14,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,5,7,105,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4464286206075171,0.12073428603160115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168282335371605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525589629399019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957850056934331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189027983538694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4114540030870597,0.09688995078918794,0.0,0.0,0.12395805563251587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171608662933755,0.0,0.0,0.11375513868986585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907101951209592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957953786084034,0.1987773906044641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13288291368663774,0.3904052138148056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402473895249848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688433108094394,0.13944425888510828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599550206833547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417838540016999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18020537525807065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588005906819147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713575774329693,0.0,0.0,0.15998932621455064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29620808398606696,0.0,0.0,0.09634353566880732,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,finnasolo,2020/03/28,"How can I make my mother realise the severity of my depression and anxiety? I have been going to therapy for about 3.5 years now, she understands it.. that i need help but never really help my problems.
Always ends up comparing me to her and how she has dealt with worse things.
We always end up fighting whenever I try to tell her this.
I know it’s not the best thing but because i feel so unheard and how it was affecting me physically with major headaches, body aches, memory problems, weight issues, i was even diagnosed with mild Psychosis; i decided to give pot a try.
I will be completely honest i know how much i have a tendency to overdue it, that is why it is always in a limit. I anyways am a lightweight when it comes to substances and can barely handle a few drags but i have noticed that it has helped with my physical symptoms GREATLY.
I have told my mother about this occasional indulgence but she worries that i will “overdose and get addicted to pot”.
Please help me do it in the most civil way possible.",3.751440576230493,5.872338081632656,5.041164465786316,79.45509603841539,73.79591836734693,8.693397358943576,29.38655462184873,9.325443323948027,2.9074625450180074,808,35,146,20,17,268,117,196,0.151,0.769,0.081,-0.9275,0,0,0,0,2,0,19.0,1,0,0,2,11,7,1,0,8,0,18,5,1,6,1,33,29,15,0,3,5,2,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,16,11,1,1,5,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,4,2,29,3,19,22,5,13,0,1,0,0,16,4,0,1,6,114,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14594590185041986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341896488266883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024156865329938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161029450938223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140495854934258,0.0,0.0,0.14870738144357393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11532334783977033,0.14036769018709808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530823052574901,0.1358825332347351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371509130385889,0.0,0.0,0.08842462363207383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769233155582784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994530798776358,0.12842720295638516,0.07608549422520054,0.0,0.0,0.14760007838031514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35894024297364313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973300755005588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14715080863184007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936406618538309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841514127550724,0.099268242573714,0.10325434483740813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15242007204770786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469569558152285,0.0,0.15092642017001154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562047871977983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576515823023541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512431219434476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13914966463157916,0.0,0.0,0.1170145679305954,0.0,0.15310023819587454,0.0,0.17788411708606855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792539549974705,0.0,0.18178765281312395,0.0,0.0,0.13937087978940746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626548467123824,0.0,0.16302635486712386,0.0,0.0,0.12080334380170765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595878847784654,0.13643229754983452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621252323022235
mentalhealth,Eatin-taquitos,2020/03/28,"I just want the pain to stop I don't know what to do anymore. This isn't just some cry for help I really don't know what to do. I'm a man in my upper 40s, bar owner, restaurant owner, father. Almost 10 years ago my wife of almost 20 years left me. I was okay with that. It was time. For five years I've been with somebody else that makes me very very happy. And now she's telling me that she doesn't think she wants to be with me anymore. But she doesn't know for sure. My best friend has worked for me for six or seven years and now he wants to leave too to go work somewhere else. My daughter, who was the most important person in the world to me, hasn't spoken to me in 6 weeks and won't tell me why. She's 17 and it's getting ready to graduate high school has been going through a pretty rough time with her mother and some of her friends. And with a situation in today's world I have to fight tooth and nail to not lose my business that I can't have open to the public right now. I don't understand why everyone that I get close to wants to leave me. I like to think I'm a good person but if you look at the common denominator and all of these relationships it doesn't take much to figure out where the problem was.  My girlfriend tells me there are things that I do or do not do that make her mad. So I change and do the things that she wants or don't do the things that she doesn't want. Now she tells me she's mad that I'm doing them or not doing them because I'm only doing it because she said so. She has a daughter that's 7 years old and I have raised her since she was 2. I love her like she's my own. The thought of losing a second family is just too much to bear right now. I can't take my own life because I would never do that to my daughter but I can't get the feeling and thoughts out of my head. I just want the pain to stop. I'm smart about it. I know that I don't get to see the results of a suicide and see people sad that I'm gone or miss me. I don't believe in an afterlife. Life in this world after your death is the same way it was before it. It's just lights out. My business is shut down because of the Corona virus. In a time in which I need my friends more than anything I can't be around them. It's just a giant fucking avalanche of bullshit piling on top of me all at once and I just don't know what to do anymore. I don't know what I'm expecting by bringing it up here I just had to get shit off my chest",2.065748061462351,2.7633022671614107,3.417068645640075,95.17972123114978,75.49350649350649,6.344531658817374,21.612720612720615,6.163053881298487,-0.016121202606917073,1898,42,471,11,39,622,214,539,0.115,0.795,0.09,-0.9703,0,0,0,0,1,1,36.0,0,2,3,6,22,24,5,0,24,1,53,11,4,3,4,83,100,24,2,12,20,6,2,2,4,2,4,1,0,3,36,24,1,2,13,1,0,4,23,12,0,4,13,7,74,12,64,83,12,59,0,4,3,2,50,32,2,11,24,313,110,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684743410358696,0.0,0.15102674648418465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22436279057449568,0.0,0.0,0.062056950703756886,0.06713191126787896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838797475075913,0.0,0.06416933404630679,0.08496254176797699,0.07913934904439207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797749971528967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283560683995839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599267794640692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720585851506698,0.0,0.0,0.07109092045603008,0.0,0.03813014310729755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747874014291399,0.06971639267906816,0.1969960660209979,0.0,0.08571578837711312,0.06325129445660965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027657105176278,0.0,0.0,0.07739359564335788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05054650400195464,0.07967601994946683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486639740068265,0.0,0.0,0.15969903790741982,0.08193443472916308,0.0,0.10653025032059192,0.07368415709534044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332637291057412,0.16873157403449715,0.0,0.0,0.06806150679401549,0.0,0.1006750559179198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087174380055538,0.05591641192361575,0.05816172754891119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913131602181887,0.08031041320827344,0.0,0.05735357745444838,0.160485560187386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05228059600810065,0.1316922142363959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672024997711209,0.0,0.07215828570308502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048310313469433895,0.0,0.0,0.08096335287375858,0.0,0.12880141949862162,0.07173327228299313,0.0,0.0,0.07632010944039534,0.1201858454902882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740846141363976,0.06238088225591518,0.08476529179376488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609419556629187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248755797651842,0.0,0.07107411607728831,0.0,0.11339959898525735,0.0,0.26365067465004843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029945087826835,0.0966408394355015,0.0,0.11973605860707726,0.13191854337881884,0.0,0.07148095226029748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850566628772815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244441922877741,0.3113561492342873,0.05985786048067963,0.060490275507281525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609366618433796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10980043015439904,0.0,0.0,0.05356991704957143,0.0,0.0,0.2428115395684417
mentalhealth,_Tahm_Kench_,2020/03/28,"I don’t know what to do. I’m posting here as a kind of last effort, I’ve never looked at mental health subs before. Basically I really dislike myself and I think about how much I hate myself basically all the time. I’m pretty sure I’m not suicidal I just don’t want to be myself anymore. I have good friends and family and I feel like I can act normal around other people but it’s getting to the point where every interaction I have with someone else I question whether or not I said the right things or acted the right way. I don’t know how to get rid of this feeling of self hatred. Whenever I try to think rationally about my life, it seems like everything is going great. I’m in college and I’m healthy and I’m pretty sure I’m going to be successful. This causes me to hate myself even more because why do I feel so shitty when my life is fine. I want to reiterate that I’m not going to kill myself because I feel like that’d be the ultimate mistake and I’d always regret it. I just don’t know how to feel normal. If anyone has any advice I’d really appreciate it.",1.7340476190476188,3.684824428571432,4.1628571428571455,84.21547619047622,79.26785714285714,6.766666666666668,21.827380952380953,7.793537801064563,1.0544934523809522,848,25,172,14,21,296,119,224,0.115,0.66,0.226,0.9698,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,2,13,16,3,0,6,0,16,3,0,4,4,44,46,17,2,7,10,0,5,3,1,0,3,1,0,1,11,8,0,0,12,0,0,5,8,5,0,0,1,7,25,11,20,41,3,18,0,1,1,0,5,7,0,5,7,105,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11363930412786392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676435161456452,0.0,0.0,0.07908262273087527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533052465027495,0.08131414734568812,0.0,0.0,0.10352463339587682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178118193067227,0.0,0.09895602042213922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946403126387314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714713575574516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680984197948816,0.0,0.097981118442052,0.0,0.10451585004757018,0.0,0.10962985172012196,0.0,0.2940039254032114,0.1661582134600909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984699582967484,0.0,0.12151565555090504,0.0,0.1982744584591856,0.09754030455510458,0.0,0.12821246199163702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296287654936437,0.0,0.12361307502911904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865998977547166,0.12110033721299353,0.19173330731711125,0.09479359107642417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16428111313564145,0.17044335263911656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09765608361272124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719509483868372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854880817046394,0.0,0.08969164453169516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22788315359539926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806223066383369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993363302708284,0.0,0.11137569541885227,0.2366217675891145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302737780718074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899940718821875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19862565332388216,0.11062042738140718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586796945769908,0.12131803325709968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853392755104473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272046935348637,0.0,0.21920787511848666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725931060160991,0.14903057703374384,0.0,0.0,0.06781086462698288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895470917974791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13718419918662975,0.09230726408781552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493554133305084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,caseyhan,2020/03/28,"Homework Anxiety Foreword - I posted this in r/college but I thought it would be appropriate to post it here too. 

Hey, y'all idek what this post is supposed to be but I just wanted to put it in writing somewhere. I am an education major at a smaller state school in California, and I am going into my third year of college. I have since fallen out of love with my university since my freshman year, but I feel that it is too late to transfer elsewhere. The last two semesters were really challenging for me socially, which affected my ability to focus on any kind of schoolwork. I kind of hoped doing online classes at home with my family would alleviate some of this stress, but it hasn't. Now I cry every time I open Canvas to try and do homework and can barely focus on my homework. COVID-19 has made it harder to access psychological help, and my friends are unsure of what to say at this point. Any advice, literally any advice at all, would be appreciated at this point.",4.81253456221198,6.439963494623657,6.0226113671274994,75.54677419354842,69.96774193548387,8.540092165898619,30.4900153609831,9.04235418022936,2.7121241167434715,774,32,138,15,14,259,114,186,0.066,0.787,0.146,0.9593,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,1,5,7,0,1,3,0,18,1,0,2,1,26,25,8,0,5,5,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,4,0,15,9,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,1,0,2,3,2,19,6,29,16,3,28,0,0,0,1,8,15,0,2,6,101,34,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27127529573039033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831744091504805,0.0,0.1061846687428156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15246965999199225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694834408460965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308520439934779,0.0,0.07018346550231641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723961463525876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07888550351936173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303738540663743,0.0,0.13923171452509114,0.13786367651833684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890859816735691,0.0,0.11314377384636505,0.1565769411639872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527601589827894,0.13133968692139164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624292628242678,0.0,0.3988075465236697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953634302823215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892138718826884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103825002026235,0.0,0.14047704339766462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296401818106043,0.0,0.0,0.14149318289741547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899949605896385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019485968077623,0.08093771999307657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942387946072936,0.0,0.13559132451723085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08187018674898076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958071057822224,0.0,0.0,0.17877043118261576
mentalhealth,Arthur_OfTheSeagulls,2020/03/28,"Stress causing physical pain? Sometimes, I get so stressed I get stomach pains. I have always had stomach pains but doctors could never figure out what it was. Is it possible for stress to cause physical pain?
I always notice that during dips in my depression, my stomach pains get worse. Is there a way to stop this?",3.867471264367815,6.685381724137932,4.048965517241381,83.2509195402299,76.58620689655173,6.625287356321839,28.63218390804597,7.793537801064563,2.167645977011494,252,11,42,4,6,78,41,58,0.45,0.55,0.0,-0.9865,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,9,0,3,1,0,6,9,3,2,1,8,9,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,9,0,0,2,0,6,0,5,6,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,27,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175837285209499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26862608918287256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439073145466984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261208185994867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13382495490742885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049295192439479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084004134144647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488561705636689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6956194049769144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739744340469274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12931199108984456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931023225821762,0.4493102708266305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378077440024848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324222382019804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JJP_SWFC,2020/03/28,"How am I meant to stay sane I have diagnosed severe depression as well as ADD and I'm struggling to stay sane. I've been told a lot to try not to read up on or watch anything to do with COVID-19, but it's hard, it's everywhere, I turn to Reddit and my front page is full of it.

I can't see my therapist right now, I can't see my girlfriend, I can't see my friends. My therapist said to me before this all started that the things that kept me sane were sports and when I go out with friends. I'm really struggling to stay sane at this point.

I'm stuck",2.1141666666666694,3.0496160833333366,3.3766666666666687,94.60166666666667,75.66666666666666,7.333333333333335,24.16666666666667,7.793537801064563,0.8384166666666673,430,13,106,6,9,140,73,120,0.177,0.81,0.013000000000000001,-0.9514,0,3,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,2,2,0,9,1,0,1,1,15,23,9,0,0,3,0,1,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,8,7,0,1,1,2,0,2,4,3,1,0,7,6,14,3,17,16,4,15,0,1,4,0,5,7,0,2,3,63,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260283393038018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031827236714938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190675960575887,0.1554427170054721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23664462705660985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703794126827523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371911627852239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302015566848534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477503309064382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531901543248228,0.0,0.098110985292583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078816164263196,0.14567949401525712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36611908117926656,0.0,0.0,0.17301445037580268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10839944526713688,0.4897084436753142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202085679114464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3556349127443764,0.10174519790638463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634015555280458,0.0,0.10397792121856053,0.1665818188392624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376990828085546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SenslessTooth,2020/03/28,"It's complicated Does anyone get into this vicious cycle where you hate yourself for not accepting yourself, but accepting yourself also means accepting the fact that you hate who you are, that you don't want to live?

I try really hard and it's draining my energy I feel like I'm fighting against nature here.

I'm also the type of person that gazes too long into the abyss, who can't turn his back to a negative experience/emotion, can't let it go because then I'd have given up.

I'm just tired of thinking :(",4.810820367751064,5.900861821782179,6.043083451202264,77.43554455445545,69.39603960396039,8.939745403111743,30.270155586987272,9.23628265651192,2.6965660537482314,408,16,75,8,7,137,71,101,0.307,0.642,0.051,-0.9817,0,0,0,0,2,0,10.0,0,4,0,0,7,8,4,0,4,0,6,1,0,0,1,14,19,5,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,9,3,0,0,6,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,2,8,4,9,17,0,8,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,4,48,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487306342257301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15245759535111347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676581549384962,0.0,0.13291425150961292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19080696882488932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452639757825923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024682162676236,0.15576675461078768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113916121902172,0.0,0.12391630953517625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19531967720588805,0.4305357745654584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22295914832124145,0.0,0.10652260209395367,0.0,0.19253199836345175,0.1929572194596325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23750785680809816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903828161842731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13968105225333718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971027275094636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506031916810469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803383539173462,0.2371632867853993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860476196871046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,extraanonymous24,2020/03/28,"Something happened to my brain I don’t know if this is the right sub to post this in but I really just want to know how this happened. Since the beginning of this year I completely shut down, I became incredibly suicidal, barely left the house and stopped taking care of myself. I started going to raves and did a lot of molly. I began drinking too much. I knew I was out of control but I didn’t care. I genuinely felt like I had no emotions, I couldn’t even get myself to cry. Last weekend I invited an old friend over to drink and do a puzzle. I ended up drinking so much that I blacked out. During this time I felt like I was going to get sick and went to the bathroom. While in the bathroom I began crying, crying harder than I’ve ever cried before I held on to this person for literally dear life. I told them everything that I had been keeping in for the past three months. When I woke up in the morning something felt so different, I just really felt okay. As the week has progressed I’ve just felt so happy, I don’t want to kill myself anymore. I want to see my friends and do my hair and try my hardest to look cute in outfits. I’ve gone on two hikes and have gotten out of bed before 9am when I would lay in bed until work at 3. I don’t know what happened, it’s like my brain short circuited and now things are okay. I just needed to tell someone",3.0780206744619534,4.231042024911034,4.410066090493139,87.27753262158957,73.59074733096085,7.0605660057617365,25.124724622945266,7.447530270364453,1.1051066259955935,1063,33,224,12,21,352,152,281,0.126,0.705,0.16899999999999998,0.8823,1,1,5,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,1,3,14,13,1,0,11,2,18,8,3,2,1,41,54,20,2,7,7,0,6,3,2,1,2,0,2,1,11,11,3,4,9,4,0,4,6,1,0,2,21,9,37,12,39,31,3,45,0,0,3,0,6,20,0,3,23,148,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933521607193418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330299576521456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20111828047002334,0.0,0.0,0.1836852530550745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944472309534614,0.0,0.10103244897295613,0.0,0.0,0.39579487221828186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411449201822623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647325001818786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132794508128493,0.07978419757682449,0.0,0.0,0.05949703125426939,0.0814825730798769,0.0,0.0,0.0809581511508306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4324549288452634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919126458840808,0.0,0.09412622874716932,0.0,0.10238915003470332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23897250346997626,0.0958919008191159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394029693775507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006729785756392,0.09966024191130914,0.0,0.14851693850609615,0.07342727319351301,0.0,0.0,0.0978722507174988,0.0,0.06362621163397007,0.1320257042288938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564456466955408,0.0,0.0,0.0765828472497231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190104591564529,0.0,0.13243842033698605,0.06679322442512882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452387176275323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599161176051323,0.0,0.07865443541468342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627179877639944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541518844307012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692788058896513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178214655048619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745151579834676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07632454404314462,0.1386960649761085,0.0,0.0,0.06375913138228707,0.0,0.0,0.07531096518380473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853296702465078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677289958723457,0.0,0.07873394445352395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598451903959759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05252640844083553,0.0,0.0,0.0860753593471045,0.0,0.06115844895233196,0.0,0.08799513123467242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939466303247593,0.0,0.07225679203120203,0.0,0.0,0.08350511976305522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655793578394919,0.0,0.0,0.06399029138020175,0.0,0.0,0.0580086064090117
mentalhealth,zeyhenny,2020/03/28,"Using my own struggles to help others What’s up y’all. So I am a hip hop artist first and foremost, however that’s not the only thing I’m focused on. On my Instagram I make videos entitled “60 Second Knowledge” in which I take a minute to talk about my outlook on specific topics that were a struggle for me in the past. As a goal to sort of give other people a shortcut so they don’t have to go through the mental struggles I did. If you’re interested in these videos please send me a PM and I’ll direct you to my IG because I don’t want this to come off as promotion. Stay strong and stay safe everybody 💙",4.232500000000002,4.39943225,5.492187500000004,84.18406250000002,70.25,8.5875,29.28125,8.472884824447931,1.949653125,480,17,103,7,8,161,90,128,0.059000000000000004,0.7809999999999999,0.16,0.8909999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,1,4,3,6,0,3,9,0,6,1,1,2,0,12,14,8,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,1,1,3,0,3,3,3,0,2,2,0,14,3,20,12,1,15,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,2,2,68,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120988373799033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17128145006666248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16913161911149882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19074366086681785,0.1130042963896406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332770129714442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13272600151490802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003820764733873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122536439037712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18981350229227145,0.1378493292445511,0.0,0.0,0.2182645662037773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4238699989699443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6236063845404275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149501534510975,0.15981856394698818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13209922400389482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717323101915046,0.0,0.0,0.11727988586123822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mageaz,2020/03/28,"I just need to get this out before I flip out I can't deal with this isolation thing. I'm going crazy. I'm so restless and I'm getting depressed again. I can feel it sneaking in. I'm having a lot of thoughts of suicide. I'm not going to do it, I always have those thoughts, they are just getting more frequent and louder. I just don't think I can handle this for much longer, I don't know what to do, my hobbies don't do anything for me anymore, I just want to be somewhere else, preferably around other people. Having my SO/ex-SO (we have serious, serious problems and I think I'm done, I just haven't pulled myself all the way out yet) here is making it worse. He isn't doing anything, but I can't relax, I wish he would just be somewhere else, being around him makes me anxious and depressed, I can't concentrate on anything, and he makes messes everywhere and never cleans anything, I just want to either be completely alone or with other people. I'm having a hard time not doing drugs on the daily, at least then I'd have something to do, and you aren't bored when you're high. But I'm not going to do that yet, I suspect that drugs are going to be hard to come by soon, so I'm not going to use any of mine yet, I need to know they're there if I can't take it anymore. But I think this whole thing is breaking me, and I do t know what to do. I'm just getting so sad.",2.4333499377334995,3.4757737671232896,3.8918430884184296,90.8001681195517,75.02739726027397,6.131008717310087,24.231631382316323,6.1124844417494595,0.5202958904109587,1068,32,236,6,22,354,129,292,0.162,0.821,0.018000000000000002,-0.9873,0,2,3,0,0,2,37.0,1,1,1,0,21,10,0,1,4,0,38,2,0,4,2,60,77,18,1,9,18,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,17,17,0,0,11,1,0,7,15,9,0,0,3,3,31,1,29,68,7,29,0,3,0,0,8,10,0,3,10,164,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120345391109736,0.0,0.0,0.09000854883993821,0.0,0.0,0.0735613063250352,0.0,0.0,0.1222046282038918,0.21455697242862548,0.0,0.0,0.35606843970135793,0.19259369521258607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204720176961756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318140663121756,0.11341726599353992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11152154782082993,0.1863383836458592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069847102681804,0.0,0.0,0.2508925277419691,0.0,0.18072921623369773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05469548699958516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260635788898211,0.0,0.3073858637015132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938034078033593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429064666926753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178347051036278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196476243273233,0.0,0.0,0.2166188255566985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951955496993686,0.16041772373239507,0.08342963738879998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998698805011115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350689129278648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327681147901396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832363550895557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813325860671797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373058498494146,0.20793854990653735,0.0,0.17175445731992478,0.06307650926002326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342668585211608,0.0,0.0,0.12760640139192592,0.0858626420711599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12077122068320685,0.12439353864179978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11023746391134702,0.07684295055774193,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JohnSmith0319,2020/03/28,"How can I help my partner? Me and my girlfriend are reaching our 1 year anniversary. She suffers from depression, anxiety and other mental illnesses, with us being a part because of the isolation it has been tough on her mostly but also me with working from home and trying to keep her happy.

Is there any advice that could be given.",6.52741935483871,7.516796741935487,7.013064516129031,72.38959677419358,65.45161290322581,9.425806451612903,33.24193548387097,9.516144504307137,3.3630516129032246,266,11,42,5,4,87,55,62,0.158,0.722,0.12,0.09,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,2,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,0,8,1,0,1,0,10,10,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,10,1,7,5,2,2,0,2,0,0,8,1,0,1,1,39,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27299905766166105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22341366503558907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18998252100039,0.0,0.2137187938684592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17030256106495933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230557868993054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24062267007437646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973966590434647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872571438909053,0.0,0.2802328664659832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483186450375445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815412387384095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025326210239404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896752304974436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360500840944519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033861228850813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17990639036710304
mentalhealth,7hr0w4w4y4cc0un75,2020/03/28,"Unhappy with my body   I am very very unhappy with my body. My weight of course, but also other things that are entirely out of my control. When I look in the mirror I hate what I see. I wish I were shorter, skinnier, cuter, more gender ambiguous, and in general just different. But the way I am is just completely different from how I envision myself in my head and how I wish I looked. Everyone says I'm relatively attractive and that I'm not bad looking, but I totally hate how I look in almost every way. And even if I looked the way I wanted, I'm not sure the people in my life would approve, not that it's even possible. How do I feel better about myself or be more like the version of me I wish I could be?",3.7421917808219187,4.4838854109589095,5.621808219178085,80.7612054794521,71.60273972602741,9.675616438356164,28.298630136986297,9.888512548439397,2.6226268493150684,554,20,115,14,10,192,80,146,0.105,0.705,0.19,0.9396,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,11,7,2,0,5,0,10,5,3,5,2,34,26,15,0,7,10,0,2,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,7,7,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,9,26,4,13,21,4,10,0,0,6,0,1,6,0,4,2,86,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202532611631417,0.0,0.0,0.09603630746053804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027052834444272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621026386621486,0.0,0.2667868849484141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12591257558599894,0.0,0.1346916763945603,0.09588247043036324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25093796759000714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863724895517825,0.0,0.10118140253009143,0.1147515928256774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060721351204503164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371289583476379,0.1232474708740402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482345221492613,0.05867013885318535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5042287566545193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325561282200024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538396380428247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550076380046273,0.0,0.0,0.09569655840642836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318384910684175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978277375760008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19817443338733406,0.07083247210981687,0.2859666819269199,0.0,0.14623784292778347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41429435014429705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530882609094073,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,catladycrazy88,2020/03/28,"Having a rough time right now... I guess I am looking for advice and to vent. This will be long so sorry in advance. 

I live with my boyfriend of 15 years in a small 450 square foot apartment. He doesn't have a job right now because he got fired from his last job and charged with assault. It is a long story but he worked at a liquor store and pushed a drunk man to defend him sexually harassing a woman customer. The man fell on his face onto cement, lost some teeth and the police came and arrested my boyfriend. This is my first stress. The second is that my boyfriend is consumed by conspiracy theories. He has been for years, but it is getting increasingly worse and really starting to scare me. We have been fighting constantly because he thinks the coronavirus is a government plot to seize more power, that they are secretly installing 5G cell towers and that the radiation will kill us all. Apple AirPods cause brain cancer. He is antivax. The illuminati control the world. Etc. etc. etc. He is constantly trying to convince me of his viewpoints even after I have said I will be done with the relationship if he continues. I think it may be some kind of weed induced psychosis (he has smoked everyday for the last 25 years?), or some other form of mental illness. The other day he raced out of the house because he thought they were cutting down trees to install the 5G towers. They were just city workers pruning them. He has claimed people have stalked him in the past, the paranoia is just very prevalent even when I try to assure him that these threats are not real. When I have threatened to break up with him if he doesn't get help, he says I am the only good thing in his life and will kill himself if I leave him. He has no money and no where to go. 

In order to escape dealing with my boyfriend right now, being confined in our small apartment together, I went to stay with my Mom. This brings a whole other set of issues. My Mom is amazing but she lives in squalor. I would not classify her as a hoarder, as she has no problem getting rid of things, but her house is an absolute disaster. There is mouldy food, flies, garbage, dirty dishes, clothing, random items everywhere. You need to clear a path to walk from any room to the next. Her oven has been broken for years as well as her washing machine, but she hasn't been able to have anyone in the house to fix them. It was like this while I was growing up, to the point she said I could not have people over or child services would take me away. She lives in a giant house which is way too big for her to keep control over. She wants to move but cannot sell it in the state it is in. I have tried cleaning in the past, however it just goes back to how it was before and I am totally defeated. In my own life this has caused me to become slightly OCD as I fear of ever ending up the way she has. Coming to her house is not an escape for me though, because I am confronted with the magnitude of her problem, and feel helpless in getting her out. 

I feel like I have no where to go. I am pretty much done with my relationship with my boyfriend, however I own the condo we live in and would feel like a terrible person kicking him to the street with no income in the middle of this pandemic. I'm heartbroken and can't believe what our relationship has turned into. I also can't stay with my Mom, because I feel so sad that she allows herself to live in such a disaster of a home. I love her so much and it just kills me inside knowing that this is her life. I have a job, income, a condo, savings, amazing friends and such a great life, but the two people I love most in the world suffer from mental problems that are taking their toll on me. I just feel helpless that they will not help themselves, and feel like I'm drowning in the weight of their problems on my shoulders. If you got this far, thanks for reading.",5.460554969168378,5.780375749347261,5.585491361591027,84.04566218543417,67.61618798955614,8.34682517637909,30.3970890506083,8.058908269544373,1.9459572579301148,3048,108,613,35,47,962,340,766,0.19699999999999998,0.72,0.083,-0.9986,10,0,1,0,2,0,79.0,5,2,8,9,28,40,9,3,48,0,75,19,5,7,5,101,114,43,4,14,23,3,9,4,1,9,7,3,6,5,33,34,5,4,12,3,3,13,16,23,1,3,19,14,92,17,99,81,18,102,0,6,2,2,83,52,0,13,33,434,125,8,0.05735052271687384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05604226704892255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045863192296510834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03900032208069641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0401008189497099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053882703956266535,0.04409901193277573,0.0,0.17480173169949795,0.0633391465390543,0.04880107076646882,0.06461439993012898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402215030865803,0.0,0.06559371963452376,0.0,0.11782956951756295,0.0,0.049402397158260176,0.0,0.12395108182096645,0.12864697568180575,0.04578972573491767,0.0,0.0,0.03698634266201577,0.059125870668095035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737899283110585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05079554059016001,0.0,0.19188297826602946,0.07575895873766701,0.051876831176802335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453528245088969,0.17398888485630848,0.1229136746643328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04878232532544476,0.06934847971577053,0.0,0.044308871586934064,0.0,0.11985312425613352,0.0,0.0651872474066281,0.04810289747779327,0.09173690417327857,0.06322915376048438,0.06317806652773876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688169295997106,0.0,0.05752725036082504,0.0,0.0,0.3308740159334921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598590455828357,0.17073463339701067,0.05097577968810341,0.19034956859808855,0.059721744073414074,0.03151834743945195,0.09349666097310666,0.0,0.06072592279540363,0.0,0.0,0.16203348100552886,0.11207427405066772,0.0,0.2532078113464169,0.101506815777462,0.048159994983937145,0.0,0.06260487027661148,0.0,0.1035221717317608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155916758234161,0.0,0.0,0.20150471719587976,0.0,0.06095452950376533,0.08431846606524211,0.04252468590872723,0.0,0.0,0.060992931536890074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043617656839712436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949512656033113,0.11927889404290905,0.05007626432359099,0.0,0.0,0.05421478129459429,0.0,0.0,0.058346099488151226,0.0,0.2195068195310965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057366042582808724,0.06527745047909414,0.03674021339649269,0.0,0.0,0.18471899569185016,0.0,0.1469310991268337,0.10910696048260456,0.04560743754588901,0.0574178781191705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419921482508913,0.04059299516052376,0.12225605297266355,0.0,0.0,0.06569483000498902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624091144494643,0.0,0.0,0.052800656031967166,0.0,0.0,0.07620227789989482,0.07349579848872212,0.05634659738482019,0.04552990892164587,0.033441550996895775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681172101272587,0.0623809000987891,0.05602312733750705,0.0,0.068985617444785,0.0,0.0,0.04732018747404505,0.033826824199219084,0.09104435097110647,0.0,0.06983748634837719,0.05156500744336192,0.053164509128842304,0.0,0.06402981050814932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04175186357931309,0.0,0.058445082240722736,0.12222049761355418,0.0,0.0,0.14772742527567814
mentalhealth,03kklz,2020/03/28,"Trust So usually I fix everything myself because when im in this kind of stage(sad),people advice don't really help me. But here I am,asking help from strangers. 

Anyways, starting with that I have trust issues. And today has just made my ""trust"" to other people dissapear.

So basically my whole life I've been around fake people. Only 2 people of my whole existence has been real with me(excluding family). And I don't know if I've been just overreacting all the time or I have some kind of speciality to tell really good if something's not right,but basically people have always lied to me so starting from 1st grade till today my trust has slowly decreased.

 And till today,I haven't had a lie in a good time. Till today. So this guy who I thought was gonna be a ""good friend"",yeah,well,you know what happened. Me having trust issues is just a problem which I've been trying to fix for a long time but haven't because it's just really hard to change it. 

Like even my best friends who are really real and who I could really trust, something just screams in me not to. And like even when I just tell myself that I just have to calm down and that they are probably real,it just doesn't help. 

I don't have a problem to live without alot of friends or anything, I just hate that even my best friends have just changed their minds about me,just because I have a hard time trusting.

I apologize if it's impossible to understand anything of this,im kind of just in real pain about this. 

Just to add up im very optimistic about life and Im very glad I have everything I have, I just hate that I can't fix this.",3.45102084831057,5.15726685669782,4.296651090342678,86.2475790797987,73.57943925233644,7.555283968368082,24.807213036185,8.263242389622931,1.432952935537982,1275,40,259,21,26,410,136,321,0.11800000000000001,0.6990000000000001,0.184,0.9765,0,0,2,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,2,2,28,30,2,0,9,0,31,3,0,1,1,49,42,23,0,6,23,0,2,2,3,1,3,1,0,1,18,11,0,0,4,0,0,0,10,7,0,0,8,3,31,23,35,31,7,23,0,0,0,0,15,7,0,7,18,170,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715546932838535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06092912618331842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051599082572345,0.06518583906172487,0.06845555804511401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13391197347164954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15369039173254584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492483462321618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058464261940966565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450934091739807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161994700425814,0.0,0.06903008140353632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22629403720509725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842531497922864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250433411532567,0.06475268970259511,0.0,0.1311905640186089,0.14458919834250178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14724366755430607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163825747529951,0.15285590224981316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228757934211662,0.08048516959084273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344206833160784,0.0715481432764438,0.0,0.06465908048349389,0.06480188482414861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928733402246692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739364490123399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05569096721589537,0.07791663979564986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538252265629842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894901293487082,0.1401330100685476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3333846536440798,0.2345492821047381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253381174309097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127444763890662,0.0,0.0,0.10365816627827053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800388162400256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581325281735331,0.17079251433067982,0.0,0.2776352266465605,0.0,0.0,0.04971501754635842,0.0,0.0,0.07622988279962634,0.0,0.0,0.08064707209924184,0.12083670697632272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583813407420537,0.0,0.0,0.16350635665521213,0.0,0.07058635676038014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yudiudyan,2020/03/28,"Penny for y’alls Opinions and Thoughts? What do you guys think the idea of self love is? 

What about self esteem?",2.0314285714285703,4.891810238095238,0.6257142857142881,103.04428571428572,89.4761904761905,2.8000000000000003,16.523809523809526,3.1291,-1.2722190476190471,89,2,18,0,3,24,19,21,0.0,0.8079999999999999,0.192,0.6946,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3403546447127621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3880383418886495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31023694929506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7171873636503482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22025341941459875,0.0,0.27288956190241426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DaKiddovol1,2020/03/28,"The Psychiatric Center is closed, and I'm feeling so lost The Psychiatric Center where I have my appointments and group therapies is closed. The personal appointments are now over phone, which just really annoys me and since I'm in my mania, I have a hard time not blowing Everything out of proportions. But what really saddends me is the closure of the Group therapy. It is relativly new for me, and it helps me so much to have other young bipolar people to talk to. I'm just hoping, that this is all over soon. Since I'm not in my depressive state I'm not so anxious. But I can fell the mania playing with the back of my mind, almost preparing me to go full primate mode, if the world should collapse. And it won't, I Know. It's just that Everything is going full super sayian in my brain, and it's preparing for the worse, and I'm going more numb and numb for everyday like a psycho

I hope, that you're all doing well. Especially you who are in terrible situations, and would Wish you had my spot. I have everyone of you in my thoughts. Stay safe",5.417045707915271,5.917271797101453,6.296328502415459,78.28177257525084,67.74396135265701,10.427201783723524,29.932738758825717,10.389873798559362,2.9925075436640647,830,29,163,21,13,275,111,207,0.10099999999999999,0.763,0.136,0.7013,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,3,0,2,11,13,1,0,11,0,18,4,1,0,2,35,34,15,0,6,9,0,2,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,13,13,0,1,3,1,0,4,4,6,1,0,3,2,21,7,20,28,6,29,0,2,0,0,10,16,0,4,8,115,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807093800386834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783334269104735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213822544369422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17622056816628878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596196399812918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508390852767365,0.28374330488805216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981721949924185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691412359584308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140882537949734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580818942877714,0.0,0.0,0.3135751491004212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675405413072476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771209345313186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17231951374537524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159390524551492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604302515060555,0.0,0.0,0.15245923077059767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943813652593208,0.13783460424563534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20225441501314506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611618087855444,0.17743783132367402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16825451045258913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687944088273648,0.0,0.0,0.3610463707366354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532078944631736,0.0920476598899544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14193236036839724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18152770772724375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16086972320254636,0.11213705166722797,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NeuroSatelite,2020/03/28,"Looking for internet options for those with MI during the crisis. Hello everyone!

I am a mental health worker in Minnesota and I have been trying to find different resources for my clients to get on the internet to either see their therapist or psychiatrist. Some of them have a cell phone through the lifeline or ""Obamaphone"" program but these have limited data. 

If any of you could think of a solution to this I (and they) would greatly appreciate it!

Thanks,

Neuro./",5.892185886402759,8.411158253012054,6.2366953528399325,71.46746987951809,68.87951807228916,9.562134251290876,35.95352839931154,9.957137785484203,4.318478141135973,377,20,57,10,7,121,65,83,0.055,0.812,0.133,0.8346,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,3,2,0,2,0,0,6,0,7,1,0,0,0,15,12,6,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,8,2,14,9,2,2,0,0,2,0,7,2,0,5,0,47,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19245117989452187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259542043395889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29567703330388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704207008564473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586588560093912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478569531388198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120108910833917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30081807252019954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23765054655690826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851996241489024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255160887668797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605503752387328,0.0,0.3285873313106255,0.0,0.18133636316102988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19213989641669976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201036621563922,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coffeebean1738,2020/03/28,"I feel conflicted My mother was diagnosed years ago with bipolar depression and schizophrenia. Since then she’ll have an episode a every year or two and then end up hospitalized for a period of time. She’ll do good by taking her meds, seeing her doctor, but then she’ll stop because she feels better then begins the slow downward spiral of her condition again until she’s eventually hospitalized. This past October, she’s been in and out of hospitals for several weeks and it wrecked havoc on everyone’s lives. She’s back on medication and I’m so determined to make sure that she never has another breakdown again, that I’ve been taking her to appointments, scheduling them for her so I know when they are or else she won’t tell me, having to watch her take her meds and beg her to take them every day. I’ve started counting her pills so then I know if she’s taking them or not. I know it’s not healthy or sustainable but my mom simply won’t do it herself. She insists that she’s “healed” because of god and it takes every ounce of patience to not call her out on that and instead cajole her into taking her meds. When she has her episodes she doesn’t remember them so she doesn’t know how bad it can get and how unhealthy she truly is. I love my mother but for fucks sake it’s hard. I know that this is also taking a toll on our relationship since she got mad at me asked why I was so obsessed with her medications and her health. She said she’s fine but it’s because of the meds and the regular appointments not in spite of and she doesn’t get it. I’m at my wits end here",3.8276415094339633,5.226736371069183,4.754229559748431,84.57681603773587,72.0817610062893,8.193081761006287,26.14308176100629,8.72156446121922,1.7797081761006293,1258,41,256,23,24,409,154,318,0.107,0.8,0.09300000000000001,-0.6768,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,5,1,15,11,3,1,7,0,22,10,0,3,2,45,50,37,0,1,13,3,3,0,0,5,8,1,0,0,15,17,0,2,8,0,0,0,10,6,0,1,6,6,55,5,32,39,0,40,0,1,2,2,51,13,1,5,27,175,70,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154270240993579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356357386206291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645849214709314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599730183628937,0.0,0.0,0.0707338665086238,0.07680697658107523,0.16822693044946382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135679929220506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393105883475604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05932529800180876,0.0,0.0792299949964272,0.09336690346562737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415464426720364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684500969546906,0.0,0.16294990884670407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23251411185966275,0.08789943613866841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302480952159063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504235259821942,0.09612091654908464,0.0,0.0,0.07715601279364269,0.07357201045228348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240407977206321,0.0,0.0,0.097780010447067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527737564452834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122797650895539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302366827537551,0.0,0.061403374975450835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4087161873523034,0.18533848909845094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077364105777763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07094759140372364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781391380457437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876176517508638,0.10420561019442758,0.0,0.08750260878523584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07330332692736237,0.0,0.0,0.10392139173575744,0.0,0.15218851063096792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511029102526585,0.0,0.0,0.07690692696408717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669854832959953,0.0,0.5533142671793122,0.0,0.08040244472904197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536395284243928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985989111337964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378803091741422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300576881043767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847580615912
mentalhealth,LonelyAsianGrill,2020/03/28,"Can’t focus or retain info Hello all, I don’t know if there’s something wrong with me but I started noticing this my when I first started college. Every time when I try to read, my brain cannot focus on whatever I have to read, instead it just automatically skims through everything and even if I try to read it slow, my brain will not process what I just read. Also during my lectures or whenever someone is having a conversation with me I feel like my brain is elsewhere and the same thing, I am not processing what the other person is saying and I was a bit frustrated because I grew up speaking English but it feels like I have no idea what the person is saying at all, as if they’re speaking a foreign language. I am so confused. Is this due to stress? Has anyone experienced this before?",3.192774725274724,5.3271707500000005,4.5646886446886485,82.18269230769229,75.47435897435899,6.508424908424907,27.809523809523807,7.447530270364453,1.7105216117216115,631,26,116,8,14,209,95,156,0.115,0.8420000000000001,0.043,-0.9,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,9,6,1,2,6,0,16,3,3,0,2,26,21,15,0,3,11,0,2,2,0,1,0,4,0,2,11,5,0,1,5,4,0,1,6,4,0,1,1,7,20,2,11,19,4,12,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,6,10,90,31,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858853184199108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494518016230133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277427914728988,0.0,0.11554443468714044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14824384912755914,0.0,0.0,0.4547484132224273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968579912640641,0.0,0.11440610578421954,0.0,0.1220362819571375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373156164186818,0.19401201423593364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550005182110765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15328659545955506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462478957872813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267699288940282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15459399659287548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371273237098199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.543293567650436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159659821394577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505158461123773,0.10453519411674576,0.0,0.0,0.192220974024334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554314435268074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09021061406572108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791782853185353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438043888880015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846138138492784,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MisterShitPost,2020/03/28,"Does my mother have a mental issue and what would it most likely be? My mother is constantly angry, yells at her family members all the time, most of her speech is yelling or patronizing, and she responds angrily to family members no matter how harmless of a thing we say, sometimes in explosive anger with cursing and throwing things. She is sometimes rude and angry to strangers as well, and acts like people are harassing or attacking her when they're not. Recently there have been situations where she thought a stranger was attacking her or being aggressive/rude when I saw the situation first hand and there was no malice or aggresion involved, the person was even friendly to them, but she perceived it as them yelling at her when they were not.



She is very dramatic and always saying things like she wants to die, she will kill herself, nobody cares about her (no matter what we do for her, it seems), bringing up her bad childhood, thinks everyone is picking on her, my dad and siblings and I are all stressing her out, everything we do stresses her out, if we ask her a harmless question like what she wants at the store she explodes and says to leave her alone and stop harassing her. 


It's driving me crazy and idk how to deal with it. I know she will not see a therapist so that's out the question. To me it seems like she's got some kind of anger mental disorder. I thought this might be age related but looking back she's always been quite mean and angry. It might be getting worse with age though.

EDIT: I don't know why this was posted as an announcement",7.1602436125965525,7.292090585858588,6.7184789067142,78.01144385026741,64.01683501683502,9.951198257080607,34.64230540701129,9.627879704456738,3.1852742721330944,1252,51,229,22,17,390,158,297,0.222,0.6990000000000001,0.079,-0.9945,0,1,0,0,2,0,29.0,4,0,3,2,14,22,8,2,11,0,28,1,1,3,2,60,46,30,2,4,10,3,1,5,1,5,0,7,0,1,16,23,0,1,11,0,1,4,7,11,1,1,11,11,44,11,27,26,5,27,0,0,3,0,48,10,0,14,17,171,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551868752095836,0.0,0.0,0.1695474273312932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09524561141872064,0.2318102227414743,0.0,0.0783407179035599,0.08506694151421433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387515587587752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009789459205918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503553145073947,0.0,0.0,0.10573709173055444,0.0,0.11676522409119365,0.0,0.08915733877798858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729188427375994,0.0,0.0,0.09735230477725763,0.09156467849592634,0.0,0.192089948495662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866604991700504,0.0,0.0,0.07871352797900599,0.0,0.05322896923134685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148408111887108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633799712178947,0.0,0.0,0.11271697636021967,0.10609408465423284,0.11198300629975487,0.0,0.0,0.10787798135704472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488711963953345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555494592542909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110979009741029,0.0,0.0,0.20534552750266127,0.21616071005683812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063192409169837,0.08895914727111699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757448022138067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22826158138053665,0.10836370030174404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059586117954997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24306118725743245,0.0,0.0,0.08118650286859104,0.18549849773022306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290385386830778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015271597872197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517764074707668,0.2334102248362655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829247510411176,0.20305696981367435,0.06528166237918084,0.10009822662872117,0.1617653364407671,0.059408022948427626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406305029461451,0.12018490102245405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091603859695845,0.0,0.09193236337439296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382612897655064,0.07237381750693186,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,randomnorthener,2020/03/28,"I don't belong anywhere 33 y/o male. Does anyone feel like they have no place to belong. I separated from my wife (no regrets there, it was my choice) and entered in to a relationship with the love of my life immediately. This ended a few months ago, as she had a lot of personal stuff to deal with. I'm still madly in love with her, but shes adamant she doesnt want a relationship. I've given her space for a few months and she recentlycontacted me and said she missed my friendship. But I cant just be friends with her due to my feelings for her. I have friends, but when I'm with them I don't want to be there. I see my kids regularly, but the strange thing is, I miss them when they aren't there, but when they are with me I feel like I'm sinking. 
I lost a child 5 years ago, which I've had counselling for, and kind of accepted. I miss her every day though. I think the best part of me died with her. 
Now I just feel so alone. Even when I'm with people. I feel like I have no place that I feel at home or comfortable. I have very little family. Has anyone else experienced this? What did you do for it? I've tried dating, I've tried socialising. Nothing has helped. I have no motivation to exercise anymore. I feel like giving up. In fact I can honestly say of it wasnt for my kids I'd have tapped out already.",1.3012792642140454,3.1631764021739173,3.086231884057973,91.84299331103682,80.26811594202898,6.420066889632107,20.7603121516165,7.468242284971852,0.4356894091415828,1021,28,239,15,26,340,137,276,0.14,0.7090000000000001,0.151,0.8544,0,1,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,5,3,14,19,1,0,9,0,25,4,0,1,1,36,49,17,1,3,8,1,7,4,2,0,2,2,1,5,10,13,0,0,10,1,0,1,10,6,0,0,8,11,46,13,32,39,5,26,0,5,1,2,34,10,0,2,19,154,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19879968511997026,0.0,0.0,0.1161367927368358,0.12374242999390847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120659233713756,0.15681311192391806,0.11489432324808214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767749863251935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231702049263289,0.11560501777161546,0.0,0.0,0.11637717446464747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09812903873136676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367339614095788,0.0,0.09931725835562157,0.0,0.0,0.07406331333699115,0.0,0.09447755768356417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570976127256676,0.0,0.396887508209712,0.3204336191785348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732685820730519,0.0,0.0,0.10756895288725847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516091839764946,0.0,0.1124793381504316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11677009077321625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920341484860705,0.2191316304853964,0.11238752013044707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240728227995035,0.09533214166359204,0.20241025404915214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790082490048845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075953995485703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142997147630726,0.0,0.0777394537551673,0.09791090366452213,0.23431189640735084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407794595768423,0.0,0.0,0.10666491641538503,0.08917329366035719,0.0,0.0,0.08935611575727118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955019268794083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12836636628375506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449671008065635,0.07185080739126083,0.1101708832096268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15226297085658055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252212359969636,0.1322788339019998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221048684516561
mentalhealth,loiytre,2020/03/28,Musical anhedonia I have suffered from musical anhedonia my whole life. Does anyone know any medication/drug/supplement that could help?,9.388571428571423,13.30055095238096,9.857380952380954,43.09178571428575,63.28571428571429,15.628571428571426,43.83333333333334,13.023866798666859,8.70821904761905,114,7,13,6,2,38,19,21,0.146,0.731,0.12300000000000001,-0.128,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731919294943743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809007597554741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207507747924986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3515588868243227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4658822496075118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692728793248148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207817190237983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837556009601552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4485200773902975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thirteenoct,2020/03/28,"Asking for help To put it simply, my friends think I need professional help for some issues i have. i somewhat agree, but something is holding me back from wanting to ask for help... for those that have sought help, how did you start doing so?

i feel like maybe what’s holding me back might be my mum’s reaction when i told her i think i have ocd... there was this one time i was cleaning my chair (this is a few nights after i told her) and she yelled at me to stop it if not she’d get upset... idk i just felt really hurt by that (maybe because i’m sensitive?). 

she told me not to feed my ‘anxiety’ so i try not to which is helping slightly when i’m not at home. but when i’m at home i try even harder to ignore my compulsions just so that she wouldn’t see it and get mad at me, so sometimes i don’t finish my cleaning or whatever ‘ritual’ and end up feeling really on edge (though i mean, i guess the edginess goes away after a while).

edit: just more background info: ocd isn’t my only ‘issue’.

anyway, back to why i’m posting this: those that have sought help, how did you start doing so?",3.5886873156342176,4.063734889380534,4.696619469026551,88.22551917404131,71.78761061946905,7.619587020648968,24.80117994100295,7.554174236665415,0.986049321533923,839,22,186,9,15,276,122,226,0.075,0.821,0.10300000000000001,0.4976,0,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,0,0,20,6,1,1,3,0,19,1,0,2,0,34,42,19,0,4,11,1,3,1,1,2,0,1,4,0,14,3,1,4,7,0,0,1,7,4,0,1,8,5,35,2,22,30,4,25,1,1,1,0,21,7,0,6,17,129,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885458367789117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21641490393661933,0.0,0.108747746483878,0.2670059862111247,0.0,0.07055805669748351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025171375047118,0.0,0.0,0.07644954163188611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704992358168385,0.08268939845488331,0.11113489325334336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942554067504667,0.0,0.12094564874180665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127507935898623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.465495061015211,0.0,0.23220656644221785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239091356530708,0.0,0.0,0.24161876950690994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05654794510553345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325660462599184,0.12608198621614006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278885768333495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858246417303448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862034884247516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843289577246312,0.0880305096061199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11085325323254303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635730845880743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830047933185433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922350592197616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910739216764635,0.11447635296873795,0.0,0.16385208694503653,0.0,0.0,0.0967693454073586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833150296556738,0.11372045271905727,0.0,0.0674927767691427,0.0,0.0,0.3318025267393737,0.0,0.1571686953367905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827034711095947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444330868364368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheKidEternity,2020/03/28,"I'll Never Be Able To Get Me Back Because I Think I Killed Her It's a struggle. Everyday. I've been trying to be something, to make it look like I was fine, like I wasn't crying in my room everyday. Like I didn't want everything going on in my mind to just stop. 

I wouldn't tell a soul what I went through, I didn't do it until I was 22. I didn't want to. The day hospital called. Didn't ask for me by name. Just Ms.Johnson. There are three in my house. So my mother answered the phone. Unsure of what she was talking about. I never got the chance to come to my own conclusion to be able to tell my parents, tell my siblings, just what I was going through. They sat there with their own ideas and I sat there with the guilt and the pain.

But recently I told my therapist I put up a wall to keep out the bad things. To pretend. But I didn't put the wall around that. Shadow, he was too big for me to do that. Me, I wasn't. I put the real me in that wall and I didn't think to ever let her out. By the time I went searching, she wasn't there. 

It isn't dysphoria or dysmorphia. I know that I'm a female. I know I'm black. I know I'm 24. I know simple things. But who I really am, I don't know. What I want, I don't know. My therapist could see that. She finally knew when I told her. When I read to her a part in a journal I keep online. She had so many questions, but it was clear. I couldn't tell her who I was. I was just this. Me. No emotional attachment, but emotional despair. Because whoever I was, that me in baby pictures, that me my parents thought I was, she was never there. Or now, she just doesn't exist. I need to read it again one day. I don't mind sharing. But you have to understand, I let my mental health fester. I let it sit and grow. And now I don't even know who the fuck I really am.",-1.0276662361146975,0.9669395518987364,1.5346370446912978,98.41792043399641,91.45569620253164,5.047274606044951,17.17514854042883,6.591547111509431,-0.2779987083440973,1373,36,340,18,49,468,162,395,0.094,0.853,0.053,-0.8866,2,0,1,0,0,0,61.0,0,1,2,1,23,12,2,2,16,0,43,3,0,1,5,60,80,18,1,7,13,3,0,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,24,11,0,3,16,3,0,9,21,7,0,2,31,3,75,5,38,40,3,45,1,1,3,1,34,16,1,3,22,239,99,2,0.17140067709156426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629147083263671,0.08011824784498663,0.0,0.0,0.06589827037550976,0.07155620298019556,0.1044842618714499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750962752751544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382325323061792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842474682879165,0.0,0.09413779771466524,0.11053925709982923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928026918275797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566042653503465,0.07752086265163667,0.0,0.0,0.07702193829521937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388053187745037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922858202871813,0.04477488973914025,0.0,0.09741095472128958,0.0,0.06854238960997998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109545234566532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888668433412484,0.0,0.09674525073712788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234879718438255,0.09481472703938762,0.0,0.3296906536509942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629032076159325,0.0,0.12560656956648414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196670019665277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05720564145334455,0.08688669208540166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863657843194027,0.0,0.1730658230218507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354571512665072,0.19829215303437836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058072767340816324,0.0,0.09119120253584703,0.0,0.19032016800760232,0.0928051152080572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584575324925448,0.09600399261513852,0.0,0.1714470605490045,0.09754574745694386,0.10980366271002794,0.0,0.08461874534808156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682920741607526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597630755226286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164932043141045,0.0,0.08959260138647178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888268585197241,0.29962349313735953,0.0,0.0,0.1990093968093388,0.11387099375223862,0.1098266330242684,0.0,0.06803649598464151,0.04997255658991191,0.0,0.0,0.16378069217563893,0.0,0.058184904354618636,0.0,0.0,0.08921707481092779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516448402805292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15889014485378242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trfk7,2020/03/28,"No automatic thoughts Hi, I don't have automatic thoughts is there something I can do? It seems that no one goes through this.. so doctors can't understand me... I'm tired of living like this. I spend my days thinking about problems without a solution this is too much for me.",1.7289218328840974,4.4764895471698125,2.7251212938005414,89.01037735849056,87.49056603773585,6.047439353099732,30.21293800539083,7.447530270364453,2.134905121293801,218,12,43,4,7,69,41,53,0.22,0.7340000000000001,0.046,-0.8157,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,0,7,13,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,6,1,5,11,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,31,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18552223779352056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944406668226415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14054018743462715,0.0,0.25401635526418204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114692800892387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19493146660467947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275259686680035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618823915487877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22146109064936476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18432621371418206,0.0,0.4567529515889996,0.0,0.33063236194236045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994728172158275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773019495726698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mindandmatter05,2020/03/28,"Are the perceived high costs per session one of the bigger reasons for people to avoid seeking help beyond the social stigma? I am from India. Most of the costs associated with things like counselling, therapy etc seem to be on a higher side than the kind of medical costs most of us are used to. Is this one of the challenges that needs to be overcome as well?",6.854130434782608,7.025978144927543,6.699818840579709,77.75233695652177,64.65217391304347,8.63913043478261,31.74275362318841,8.07648339933343,2.2658666666666667,288,10,52,3,4,91,51,69,0.03,0.847,0.122,0.6966,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,7,0,6,1,0,2,0,9,9,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,3,0,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,4,16,7,3,5,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,3,1,40,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815578741287785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921755820794873,0.2667361830415653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26289659644422503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333843248389885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543252994953142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871947205111987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3421447199078503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502288185558626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595693039958135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22982866508404706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25734956768532746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887082067358335,0.0,0.16772215724772707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30367639644855665,0.2180430184329148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269904397938661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clinkyscales,2020/03/28,"What's the difference between types of therapy? Ex. Counselors, therapists, psychologists. Thinking about starting but don't really know what I need.",6.63326086956522,10.498002652173916,6.148152173913044,61.224836956521756,87.69565217391305,10.995652173913042,40.53260869565217,9.516144504307137,6.813791304347826,123,8,14,5,4,38,22,23,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,9,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4293588688051581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258492585216792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047167621907637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632672912013061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908749538912315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4699610637212488,0.4771486080565478,0.0,0.26332236525128666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ttrashyouthh,2020/03/28,"What do i suffer from? Hello. 

I am a 15 year old girl, i live a normal, healthy life. I suffer from anxiety and ocd symptoms. Its not as bad rightnow, but instead ive gotten these weird attacks that ive never had before.

These started about a month ago when i was in asia, on a family trip. I get these attacks randomly but they only last for a minute or so.

It feels like i am having a flashback, it feels dreamlike. It just feels like i am having a flashback from a random dream, i start to feel nauseous, i feel like im gonna throw up, my heart starts to beat faster, i feel like im having a panic attack. Then after a minute or so its all gone. I forget what that ’flashback’ was about, and i feel normal again.

Ive been wondering if its from a trauma, ive had experiences in my life that totally could cause trauma to anyone. But they have happened a long time ago, and i got my first attack a month ago.

Thank you, i really need help with this.",1.949144657863144,3.6223950969387815,3.5962665066026425,89.81427971188478,77.62244897959185,6.040336134453782,20.71308523409364,6.794906146795322,0.3322584633853545,733,18,156,7,17,244,109,196,0.185,0.679,0.136,-0.8757,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,2,2,8,16,4,1,13,0,18,4,1,1,3,31,37,14,0,5,8,0,7,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,15,4,0,0,8,1,0,3,2,11,0,1,8,7,25,5,17,27,2,27,0,2,0,0,6,4,0,6,24,105,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.278995635381521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025772695794882,0.0,0.0,0.07335721511323492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4774121698298812,0.0,0.0,0.08759750249320343,0.0,0.0,0.08927275651057377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777397200590423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376404394446126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262449426254397,0.09890210840280657,0.0,0.3713281620177441,0.29979786311487505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923846510741518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05481241810221226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390805960472908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277372134188562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432174268579355,0.07032059489616829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266468695151849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855176384299628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14820551341576574,0.20501966906224373,0.0,0.0926396037376932,0.09284420512440256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16748021218615886,0.0,0.0,0.07779124251156526,0.08091493887035461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055838259966272,0.0,0.0,0.11008795420066664,0.0,0.0,0.07979063568598756,0.0,0.12309213988217173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720959342034008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227726881450077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904419204077342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658927633159876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117528555404345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137730623935184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06756016957947103
mentalhealth,rachillthefout,2020/03/28,"anyone else hate birthdays? mine is in 2 days and idk man they just make me sad and nostalgic and I always feel so much pressure to have ""the perfect day"" which doesn't exist in reality...",3.4493693693693714,5.160716459459461,4.528108108108111,84.56531531531532,73.5945945945946,7.095495495495496,25.84684684684685,7.793537801064563,1.4228090090090086,147,5,29,2,3,48,34,37,0.24600000000000002,0.669,0.085,-0.7165,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,2,4,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,7,6,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,4,1,3,6,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3188771617708733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679625718022057,0.3926633170568968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4943019001033685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201385883032061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19377205699781827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37835921896748026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558082803241847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28171735152833755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,97ajf_,2020/03/28,"Breakup causing severe mental health issues. Hello everyone,

I recently suffered a breakup from a three year relationship. The support for my mental health that the relationship brought is now gone and I’m suffering from that as well as the classic breakup depression and heart break. I have felt suicidal as well as disassociated. I really require a friend and support that will help me get through this. 

I am asking Reddit for as much support as it can throw at me, please?",7.157499999999999,9.035135940476193,6.8676190476190495,70.76071428571429,64.59523809523809,9.885714285714286,37.80952380952381,10.125756701596842,4.252466666666667,385,20,61,9,6,121,56,84,0.17,0.625,0.20600000000000002,0.1725,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,9,0,0,6,0,5,3,1,1,0,6,14,9,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,3,2,1,3,1,7,6,12,10,1,8,0,3,0,0,6,1,0,0,3,43,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436506953500351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578504200749424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323465228651371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14682803823581614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475370171193958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871678767360196,0.0,0.0802806379102701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3266652834944557,0.0,0.18208700061946612,0.10299458429231792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038037869819025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30970485015941823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129572597351243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16867175937322146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984380769958591,0.0,0.1517200130539312,0.3299451480095457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17359126235150585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16807832531309105,0.523112230156943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763163141282283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989515459991547
mentalhealth,4DankInhale20,2020/03/28,"One of the reasons I might never get out of this So I just went out for a walk and thought about some things, especially about different ways to live, ideals and personal beliefs. What I realized was that everyone I talked to before seems like he figured it all out, including all my friends who do suffer from mental illness. It's like everyone believes he knew how to live the ultimate life and that this knowledge is applicable to everybody else. Of course this ""knowledge"" differs depending on who you ask. What I really would need is that kind of belief, that I knew what would really matter in life, no matter if it's true or not. And in some way I guess I had this belief most of my life until the moment of retraumatization, when something happened that shattered all these believes that keep you sane.

Now I could do everything I wanted, get rich or live like an eremite, be the next mother teresa or the biggest asshole who always gets what he wants, etc., no kind of life would make me happy, because it feels like every way of living is mistaken. I do have energy and work hard to get over my mental problems, but I get nowhere. As a friend recently told me about myself: ""I see you're working hard, but in which direction?""",8.891748251748254,7.38310282905983,8.439696969696971,72.44318181818184,61.30769230769231,11.756954156954155,37.08469308469309,10.637119530657019,3.8023555555555566,978,37,179,19,11,312,137,234,0.08199999999999999,0.8290000000000001,0.08900000000000001,-0.0642,1,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,0,3,8,14,0,0,8,0,15,5,0,4,5,54,36,16,0,10,8,1,3,4,2,4,5,0,0,1,24,8,0,1,13,0,1,2,4,2,0,1,7,4,21,12,28,23,7,21,3,1,1,0,15,9,0,11,11,124,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381129853656301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941643114090298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061401046807974334,0.0,0.08570958654924545,0.22696524548162803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042074485873246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104724479495077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414284249253702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233504015871862,0.0,0.0,0.08486518673119638,0.19249417599162286,0.09052516721272696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05092960444987083,0.07195798556102542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15563982529617448,0.0,0.2631233691517383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095998255828908,0.0,0.08907081633472481,0.1072236733744584,0.18045969497514414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952903968030926,0.0,0.2097792491901322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28458028576006583,0.19683665831139352,0.0,0.3557682072247053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723474340812251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030142902144416,0.10685334533003156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468633761777735,0.07768535695897479,0.0,0.10712221806504324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825389090940966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794921594332628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638025585945284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905407403921576,0.10356211233149094,0.0994538210997177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026481246174759,0.091696289445745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775430533876554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809589682216369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691723798608039,0.0,0.0,0.0799644271736015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962470879958114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188204713893767,0.2398525346929361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337311712548672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14665805109760965,0.0,0.0,0.21465652605103194,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,guys-cry,2020/03/28,"I’m not sure if my friend is developing psychosis again or if what she is telling me is true. A bit long but please, please help me! My friend has had a pretty messed up past. She was hospitalised for 3 months due to ‘mild psychosis’, her mum seemed to have psychosis also as she thought her own daughter was possessed by the spirit of a caucasian girl from America. She was also sent to Africa for 3 months where she underwent conversion therapy, where an imam would tie her up, place speakers all around her and play the quran to ‘expel the demon’ that they believed was the reason behind her atheism and same sex attraction. She was also electrocuted and the people who tortured her there also engaged in waterboarding. 

As far as I’m aware, she was brought back home and ended up in foster care (without admission to the hospital, which i find stupid as clearly that experience would have had a toll on her mental health). She was neglected by her first foster mum, who ended up being homophobic and driving her out of the house and her second foster mum used her money that she got from the government to go on holiday. 

Now she is living in a hostel with her roommate, and she keeps telling me that her roommate is out to get her etc. It started by her saying, ‘oh, she throws out my food and i’m pretty sure she keeps messing up the bin on the purpose to annoy me’, followed by ‘her boyfriend (who lives in the same hostel) keeps coming around and whenever they’re with me, they keep laughing and being awkward (bearing in mind, her roomate and boyfriend smoke weed 24/7). 

Initially, I told her that the reason they may be laughing and being awkward is because they’re simply just high, and she said that she thinks I’m right. However, I never know what she’s thinking and she tends to always agree with me even if she thinks otherwise, to the point where when she’s feeling ill/sick, I’ll repeatedly be asking her ‘are you okay’ and she’ll repeatedly reply ‘yeah i’m good’ even though I know she’s not good, and then she’ll vomit all over my bed or something like that. 

I speak to her about voicing her thoughts often, because it’s gotten to a point where it severely annoys me but I have to keep reminding myself that the reason she’s like this is due to all the abuse she’s endured. When she wants something, she won’t directly ask me (for example, can i eat some pringles? or can i switch on the light?)

She’ll say ‘do you want to eat some pringles’ or ‘do you want to switch on the light’ and whenever I ask her something, her response every single time is ‘oh, I don’t mind’. The reason I’m providing this background is just to give anyone who’s reading this a gyst of what her personality is like, so at the moment I’m not even sure what’s going through her head. 

It got to a point where a week after she told me stuff about her roommate, she started feeling as if ‘they were poisoning me with carbon monoxide and i couldn’t breathe all night and i was trying to find the source of the gas’. I told her that’s not a healthy thought to have and she repeatedly kept telling me how she feels like her roommate’s boyfriend is going to stab her one night as she’s walking back to her room (her roommate’s boyfriend engages in knife crime, he apparently has a knife under his bed or something) and he’s also a drug dealer. 

The other night, she texted me telling me to block her roommate on everything and that she was a crazy bitch, she told me that she could hear her roommate and her boyfriend in the room next to her. Apparently, her roommate started saying to her boyfriend that my friend groped her inappropriately when she was braiding her hair and her boyfriend was laughing and alluding to stabbing her. 

What’s confusing me is the fact that my friend had this constant paranoia of not telling her roommate that she’s lesbian, because she was scared that her roommate would react negatively and assume she likes her. What a coincidence that this is exactly what her roommate says. I don’t know if this is her paranoia, or if something is actually going on? And even before she knew about how her roommate’s boyfriend was involved in knife crime, she had this irrational fear that she was going to be stabbed, to which i told her most likely will not happen, and now she’s heard him saying he wants to stab her? As far as I’m aware, her roommate does seem to be very adaptable - she adapts to the people’s personalities that she’s with, she talks about people behind their backs and she seems to have an attention seeking issue where she keeps making the conversation about herself, and the last time i was there, she kept getting calls from an ‘unknown number’ who kept bullying her, and she was trying hard not to laugh as she kept shouting ‘ayy right, who’s this cause you’re PISSING ME OFF’, and my friend and I clearly recognised the voice and laugh which belonged to another girl who stays in the hostel, and when we told my friend’s roommate that we know who it is, she kept changing the subject and conveniently the calls stopped. 

In addition, my friend smokes weed from time to time and so do I, but I’ve told her to stop because she’s generally a very paranoid person and given her past, I wouldn’t want her to develop psychosis again. This one time last year, we got high together and she got so paranoid, she started rubbing off on me to the point where I had to separate myself from her. Throughout that night, she kept coming out of her room to knock on my door asking if i could hear heavy metal music, and a few weeks later she awkwardly told me that the ‘heavy metal music’ was a manifestation of her thinking I wanted to kick her out of the house. 

Like, she literally heard heavy metal symbolising me wanting her to leave - I’ve gotten stupid high quite a few times to the point where every sensation is extremely uncomfortable, and I’ve never had an auditory hallucination. She’s so paranoid that sometimes, I have bouquets in my kitchen and as they’re dying, leaves will fall. On quite a few occasions, she’s ran out of the kitchen saying ‘some dodgy shit is going on in there, the leaves are falling’ and i’ve had to tell her that that’s obviously going to happen because they’re dying. 

The moment I do a voice which she deems ‘scary’, (i stopped a long time ago seeing as it made her so paranoid), her eyes will dart around the room for minutes and she’ll start biting her clothes. For now, she’s distanced herself from me, she keeps leaving my normal messages on read, she keeps sleeping and she hasn’t contacted many people and those are the beginning signs of psychosis - and I’m not sure if shes just scared because what she’s heard is true, or whether what she’s experiencing are delusions/hallucinations. I want to believe her but at the same time I’m not too sure on what’s actually happening, and I can’t travel to her because of social distancing and she’s two hours away from me. 

I can’t message her roommate, just in case it is true so yeah, I’m not exactly sure what my take is on this and how to help. 

Thank you for reading.",6.795792321713375,6.680762051169598,6.494240525556317,80.14569377990429,64.81871345029239,9.211756664388243,33.044011544011546,8.653254563040722,2.4947613617376785,5618,209,1088,72,77,1757,445,1368,0.122,0.785,0.09300000000000001,-0.9933,4,0,8,0,1,0,121.0,3,4,5,3,56,56,9,7,66,3,93,18,7,12,21,209,202,101,2,24,35,4,6,7,7,13,4,18,10,5,67,70,5,19,26,6,1,19,22,19,0,5,58,29,217,37,150,121,18,156,3,1,2,2,225,73,3,26,70,742,284,5,0.0,0.0447424969389386,0.07370168561018743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033474259645592364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509936572580624,0.03142150192566619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03959737065030967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0264044825886259,0.0,0.0,0.10085013995317728,0.1412117050532073,0.0,0.0354791985726171,0.08711130769285746,0.0,0.16113808053828332,0.0,0.032133184735591264,0.08509102021428637,0.0,0.0,0.04122697041038133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771196577815874,0.0,0.03850147963619787,0.038792584518704515,0.039947815555409084,0.06505825914615639,0.0,0.04080794691359702,0.0,0.06030071442789502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838321781041246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03304629903496953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379261828561745,0.07728111881210699,0.0,0.0,0.06689289656526695,0.0,0.042115272550360315,0.09976734437417907,0.0,0.0636332254685923,0.0,0.03393858304981465,0.03693906138256596,0.0,0.0424934150088947,0.057281703979215975,0.02697760351352196,0.0,0.0,0.06902865054472257,0.032120841753973936,0.0456626765527936,0.0,0.20422699617787424,0.0,0.03945879180899357,0.03622531953790169,0.15022946026553016,0.06334694164264881,0.12080877909329082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001800070820256,0.0,0.03382786540822373,0.0,0.03875531424971677,0.04013986979974106,0.08512237213917688,0.0,0.05062293928938138,0.11969475635442835,0.03787895909130595,0.0,0.03718854676063267,0.08714592291694656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03941433537419524,0.0,0.2685210172698269,0.0,0.0,0.08301333269337549,0.06156310572746827,0.0,0.1599405312036477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291422660881597,0.0,0.06669012175921066,0.06683741180408594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03573187793405914,0.025206823618755363,0.038285341560238384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038055811222922176,0.0,0.07625890671821968,0.0,0.06028348186040877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058249678406249714,0.0,0.04016094536160879,0.14175053921436218,0.03699932273636485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051177819747265166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209733463118136,0.10471930710097813,0.09891851718244664,0.03945387163796316,0.0829039729928849,0.17848927855245614,0.0,0.0,0.07683626461500327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803303304874179,0.11331843430347972,0.0,0.0,0.15530493710846854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06449809505532494,0.035920872862643484,0.18018197465281166,0.07561388534108476,0.0,0.030091896956229436,0.10313293740958936,0.0,0.04266098065043021,0.038762758374699585,0.0,0.0,0.03778986403327411,0.0384942073359587,0.0,0.14535744248606938,0.03734816941194257,0.0,0.13364278610873345,0.040249898962402296,0.0,0.09471365428134658,0.0,0.0,0.04322913360904493,0.0,0.0,0.21354477827514307,0.0,0.028392769827607106,0.030352141301883608,0.19803702095645015,0.03476672146303357,0.04318481538415125,0.0,0.0,0.09678697754109886,0.037101555243588415,0.0899378405880675,0.17615737018070404,0.0,0.0,0.28867020209508576,0.0,0.05127664279535053,0.0,0.03688856559759307,0.0,0.0,0.03261475523431948,0.0,0.062316186999366766,0.17818684286062464,0.0,0.06058174754251354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03640179145518886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08047638641139601,0.0,0.0,0.02431787137219049
mentalhealth,RyanIJackson,2020/03/28,"Im not sure anymore My life seems like a endless loop on downs and now and again i catch my self being happy but i am more often uncounted by nights where i cry my self to sleep, i feel so drained and know im at a tipping point now but have no clue what to do. Been like this for at least 6 years but really only gotten bad in the past 3. Cinda just feel like a useless human and feel like running away from everything at the cost of my dream. I know ether way i'll probably regret my decision.",2.3909433962264157,3.4331969150943418,3.9378773584905673,90.42964622641512,75.13207547169809,7.186792452830187,22.683962264150942,7.645422480735847,0.762003773584905,387,10,88,5,8,129,75,106,0.207,0.66,0.133,-0.8998,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,0,5,0,5,2,1,0,1,19,12,8,0,1,5,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,4,0,0,7,1,1,2,2,3,0,0,2,3,10,6,13,9,2,18,0,2,0,0,3,9,0,2,10,53,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17211836631672492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16305915952411446,0.0,0.1449098638381822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906402922557812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15597863114679492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632614851162096,0.2479732086330045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18475085232571375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3749349703588177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907608514686782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258591944908945,0.3391577554424457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16286813623393914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319952033303184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567638590859635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640640877795464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18711995025455166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111827706722201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15799652350133178,0.36210815397379387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17367876715659716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16357205286096224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377586336500154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176271806842036
mentalhealth,pshychonaut8900,2020/03/28,Um plz I need advice Um iam 15 years old I'm fucked like iam fucked like I don't believe anything is real if u und  erst and what iam saying I don't know what to do but fuck mental hospitals anyways I just wanted to post this cause like I don't know what to do iam crying like a bitch but plz  just someone like um just plz I need advice,0.5691428571428574,2.213190066666666,2.433904761904764,96.696,81.66666666666666,4.819047619047621,17.38095238095238,5.288315135182226,-0.7077047619047621,265,5,63,1,7,88,41,75,0.225,0.5760000000000001,0.19899999999999998,-0.802,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,4,9,4,0,1,0,6,3,0,1,0,14,15,4,0,4,6,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,1,6,5,3,15,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,4,1,7,28,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3480162942169519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653660925731568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006241467453973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18292715610917354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956017628072846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4938691158840838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19572545960970916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.434980546670693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794528878858315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640736069755339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868547294768134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17054203685501526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20268288211675486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14160857723328413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087831003599084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503042277593644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467137619043198
mentalhealth,EDDA97,2020/03/28,"Friend opened up to me last night about what sounded like pretty severe depression and probable alcoholism - need advice Hi all,

pretty much as the title states - but really I need to know how much I should be contacting someone like this. I don't want to feel prying or invasive and overwhelm them, but I'm worrying and don't know if they'd message or call me if they needed anything.

What would you recommend in regards to how often should I be contacting them, should I try and keep it light hearted and genial or focus on the issues they're having, let them direct the topic of conversation - just any general advice would help.

Thanks",7.3744537815126066,7.80636073109244,7.3021848739495825,72.98840336134455,63.537815126050425,10.49747899159664,31.285714285714285,10.290406445055957,3.2457193277310923,513,17,86,11,7,164,81,119,0.081,0.7240000000000001,0.195,0.9434,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,5,0,5,6,0,1,3,0,12,2,1,2,1,32,22,15,0,11,8,0,1,2,1,5,1,1,0,0,4,6,1,1,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,13,4,10,13,3,7,0,2,0,0,14,4,0,6,4,60,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32239656586399457,0.0,0.17629347244169205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217934755771072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357491025074291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16844394128016565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420809345744097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340939486383944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12744869889422958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195479946596163,0.11057008885127377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17217674933596008,0.0,0.1466251918336704,0.0,0.0,0.18131684371934945,0.13446548473479036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16868411593570498,0.0,0.16118352708721367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24253108706883095,0.3669501634217591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480501464022678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3356499138430299,0.17785619279775428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567843925549493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863593259188717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977118263503746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15187421098803944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199790113858916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729845463240383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16752621770761886,0.0,0.23436756329171365,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,allthemuwus,2020/03/28,"Am I over-reacting? How can I cope with panicking over mentions of suicide. I'm not sure if it's an over-reaction. Whenever someone mentions ""i'll want to kill myself"" or something of the like, I get anxious and start to get really snappy. Even when I start to realize they didnt mean it. Then it often leads to hyperventilating and me being a crying mess. I want to manage this better but I don't know how. 

I don't really know what triggered it because I never lost close family or loved one like that. The closest thing I can pinpoint it is a celebrity i really looked up.",2.3915335968379448,4.581737513043478,4.596837944664036,80.72624505928854,78.21739130434783,7.6600790513834,25.23715415019763,8.575989854853784,2.027521739130435,454,17,86,10,11,157,77,115,0.127,0.7190000000000001,0.153,0.6059,0,0,1,0,0,2,14.0,0,0,1,3,5,8,1,0,5,0,8,1,0,4,2,22,21,10,2,3,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,4,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,2,1,13,5,10,18,0,10,0,1,1,1,4,4,0,4,7,60,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245190259587468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211497329333381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757689059693578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21830596967983426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13126554195347395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187353879782278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20766633507696627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21987577178085801,0.0,0.21844402441928049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941881272846557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16689109637669694,0.0,0.21694760230912344,0.0,0.17937012602859134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164855393237462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532801269308087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467100457092307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3819527699431587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839130334685806,0.15299934931288434,0.0,0.0,0.2813376317756389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2173887174554856,0.0,0.18730959331736236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203366932821387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23444337066199325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ambiguously_Jewish,2020/03/28,"I am irrationally obsessed with Doja Cat, what should I do? I think about her day and night and know I will never find love because she is the only woman I want. I am on the verge of losing my job due to this obsession and no longer leave the house or talk to any of my friends. I spend most of my time masturbating to her and feeling gross about myself for it. What should I do to stop this behavior?",3.2484738955823325,4.233770493975907,4.3062048192771085,88.82790160642574,72.97590361445782,7.461044176706826,23.471887550200805,7.793537801064563,0.8627526104417673,313,8,70,4,6,102,57,83,0.243,0.6920000000000001,0.065,-0.9346,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,2,6,0,2,3,0,8,1,0,0,1,16,13,5,0,3,1,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,4,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,15,2,12,10,1,8,0,1,0,1,7,2,0,2,6,51,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18688439216780986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16752536202623036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723366880404295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389552925701789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511769640000638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21232226023754547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171009163663232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727126040854518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510317579215911,0.0,0.0,0.29099060123058623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074489540966751,0.0,0.0,0.2480322867584416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21195514124360146,0.0,0.0,0.2578963213410054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20901005046592727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297585900347971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22088679535083064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17609107944073946,0.0,0.0,0.16024749534817392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16209367364602892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chewy1324,2020/03/28,"Help Please!!! I just want to share this app the is made for people like you and me. It's for mental health support and works really great. It using innovative music theory to help calm your mind and has a 100% anonymous posting feature to allow others space to vent or talk about mental health problems. While gaining support from others.

Download link: [https://teensr.page.link/download](https://teensr.page.link/download)",8.066500000000001,12.30888001538462,5.91413461538462,67.13274038461543,71.92307692307692,5.711538461538463,23.509615384615394,7.1686216300943375,1.4058076923076923,351,10,45,4,8,101,53,65,0.032,0.565,0.40299999999999997,0.981,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,0,2,2,7,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,3,0,12,7,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,6,8,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,2,27,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22007137212698571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4243534304218992,0.0,0.0,0.26758953196239704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097519647992982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18887635974385214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40232103692671706,0.0,0.2015497859581304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13838484473606555,0.0,0.0,0.21911247788453306,0.0,0.0,0.19117176077644327,0.0,0.0,0.19100036965712575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787565060624767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4530314475377801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043942526923205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17239945389836994,0.0,0.0,0.11773549341526787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14531888156473352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BKwhopper__,2020/03/28,What mental disorder do you think “Tyler the Creator” has? Just curious,3.942499999999999,7.197274916666673,4.449999999999998,73.84500000000001,91.5,9.066666666666668,31.0,8.841846274778883,4.415700000000001,57,3,8,2,2,18,12,12,0.18,0.667,0.153,-0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6924170259004278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6088488269602467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3871198369398526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seuleky,2020/03/28,Any interesting shows on mh to watch ? So bored,0.1833333333333336,1.796965666666669,1.898333333333337,89.46750000000002,114.55555555555556,6.2444444444444445,15.611111111111107,7.1686216300943375,0.5618444444444441,37,1,8,1,2,12,9,9,0.198,0.579,0.223,0.079,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lolybop,2020/03/28,"A big ol' vent sorry guys I'm at a total loss. I've been struggling for months, feeling isolated, trying to overcome flashbacks, low energy, feeling like I'm slowly losing my mind. Everyone says to reach out if you're struggling, bit when you do it's crickets. My friend killed himself, about a month ago. He kept reaching out for support and was repeatedly turned down. Now that he's doing everyone talks about how he finally found peace, how happy they are that he's free now. It keeps the thought of death up front and centre in my mind. I work hard, I bend over backwards to live and support my friends, but I get sick too often to ramp up savings and my friends steal from me and fuck me around constantly. My therapist keeps saying she doesn't know how to help me, she's talking about referral again which stresses me the fuck out because I'm just getting comfortable around her. I'm convinced I'm doing something wrong, that there's some magic part of myself I could change that will make people enjoy being around me but nothing I try makes any difference. I don't know if I'm secretly a piece of shit, if I'm exausting or selfish or too loud and annoying. I don't have bad intentions, I love people and I want to support them without being toxic or tiring or annoying. I don't do things with the intention of being selfish or sold absorbed but what if I just can't see it? I've started hiding things I could use to hurt myself. I have a history of psychosis and the stress of losing my income and not being able to make bills on top of everything has me hallucinating just about non stop. I'm scared I'll hurt myself badly, I'm scared I'll become psychotic again, I'm at my wit's end and I don't even know who to ask for help anymore.",4.613354823304679,5.599706088825215,5.329960601719197,82.74970690066857,69.77363896848138,8.223543457497613,29.154847182425986,8.472884824447931,2.076853772683859,1391,51,271,21,24,451,189,349,0.24,0.606,0.154,-0.9914,1,0,1,0,0,4,31.0,0,1,2,5,23,38,6,6,9,0,23,6,1,9,1,64,61,26,2,7,17,0,3,1,3,1,2,3,0,1,12,17,0,4,8,0,3,1,8,24,0,0,6,7,38,15,40,48,5,34,0,6,1,3,25,19,3,11,15,165,50,1,0.08872302695658334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864761015589111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033470077270948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798940215240529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369469130962221,0.08294405347614371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481600430908706,0.05408473373536985,0.09798761265933624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686256637407258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385719826651777,0.0,0.0,0.09587807270729212,0.0,0.14167623513284378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269667943594592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858226749394573,0.0,0.0,0.05860072253802735,0.0,0.0,0.1695573087976122,0.07973853573477363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972205651585845,0.06338374818548216,0.0,0.0971917392836408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728021959283988,0.2056415716190161,0.16404601751510342,0.09270823935384097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784974570144488,0.0,0.09444731199326548,0.07947840517459351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893834953571104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189959670740625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772220587170913,0.09815888391739264,0.0,0.14627956592319025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334558939778973,0.0,0.07834405828386913,0.0,0.0,0.19851674538608716,0.0,0.0,0.08007599580656208,0.0,0.17766992831734355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17916993026845698,0.0,0.1416357472993863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513213723811118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607839219811956,0.0,0.12301875124155605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14111222423484726,0.17765445568146934,0.0,0.07070076547537334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107291218677614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830332076609218,0.0,0.0993181648166912,0.0627986151347833,0.0,0.0,0.07417642328986776,0.20326385522989773,0.18550514321891387,0.0,0.0,0.30204551872467955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14262441659834482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030142726232985,0.11788727348907345,0.0,0.0,0.07043617294524576,0.0,0.10197406780207473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047422274214865,0.09650517587021724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662820872384304,0.0,0.0,0.05233114003335655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552583189754608,0.0,0.06459142031054378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700470200291574,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,michaeld_519,2020/03/28,"The lasting impacts of trauma. A couple mental health experts are interviewed about how trauma leaves lasting impacts on people, especially children. It was eye opening for sure to learn about how important it is to understand and recognize what's happening so that people can break the cycles of abuse. Really incredible stuff. 

https://youtu.be/W9kK3Zze6U0",9.675272727272727,13.47445143636364,7.794545454545452,58.77181818181819,61.90909090909091,10.945454545454542,38.27272727272727,10.793553405168565,5.765290909090909,299,15,32,9,5,89,45,55,0.158,0.775,0.066,-0.7717,0,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,4,2,1,2,1,7,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,8,5,0,5,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,2,24,5,2,0.0,0.3064350668758004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861699306863379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22870625818144846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749123211262908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4216370500382323,0.0,0.2738525491906951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606388971322716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35860390087827937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16568543767277594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960702543389355,0.0,0.0,0.2437563572615168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692436613334099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HeadHoliday,2020/03/28,"Release your thoughts? Do you ever feel like after a long hard day all you want to do it just release your thoughts and feelings into the world and get some positive feedback and reassurance that you’re not crazy and that you're not alone?

These thoughts can’t be shared with the people close to you because you fear bring judged. You just want to share your feelings anonymously to strangers and feel like you’re being heard and that there are others out there who feel the same way.

How about posting on reddit? With your post history that anyone can see you don’t really feel anonymous anymore. There’s also always the possibility that you say something wrong and get permanently banned from the sub.

Maybe talk to a therapist? I don’t know about you guys but I can’t seem to discuss my problems openly with another person face to face. The anxiety gets too bad and social interactions are a challenge.

During this period of social isolation, I’m thinking of spending my time productively and creating an app where you can post what’s on your mind and people can comment and interact with your post. Fully anonymous and post whatever you want.  

Stupid idea and a waste of time? Would you use this app? Let me know in the comments below. Honestly, I want to make this because it's something that I want to use.",6.081269727403157,7.466588069105692,5.690927785748446,80.03515781922526,66.6829268292683,8.715064562410332,30.730750836920137,9.007467420416297,2.543669344811096,1059,40,190,18,17,326,137,246,0.11699999999999999,0.773,0.11,-0.8973,0,2,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,17,0,1,12,12,1,1,12,0,15,2,2,4,2,57,43,16,0,7,5,0,7,2,0,1,0,2,0,2,15,21,0,1,14,0,1,1,6,5,0,0,4,10,24,7,26,35,3,24,0,0,1,0,33,10,0,2,9,121,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696346597470643,0.0,0.08259030214964544,0.08593444867691184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829457560429924,0.07900635692020931,0.0,0.10242268858388788,0.07221343713042698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623169144726836,0.12591297826811867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660489736774383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341964540449592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162149473257923,0.313318673459536,0.14756172318199445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16187336593193494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226012367452897,0.0,0.0,0.09251559555140046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658677044199173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351629522220935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560737497445988,0.0,0.10091151197243424,0.0,0.0,0.09139658804285612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893796788257685,0.0,0.10375527933747566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427997873935677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319805499494725,0.09017718989712656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11642890873752995,0.4945524267010198,0.0,0.0,0.09882180917419577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616166850840062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08212973974497237,0.0,0.0,0.08229812122582655,0.09401918615783053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105550837446299,0.0,0.15901482635268982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300986168998327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991215426508504,0.0,0.06617550916069584,0.0,0.2459703792775877,0.12044289387141162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17839573782463275,0.0,0.0,0.3045762289413274,0.08197620007683269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07336477119111924,0.11291680749470673,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xtabbas,2020/03/28,"The power in stillness Hey friends,

I did a write up about our current situation of social distancing and the impact of internet on mental health.

[https://medium.com/@xtabbas/the-power-in-stillness-36c67f165c35?sk=0b4772e97d322fa1a107474f162db6d1](https://medium.com/@xtabbas/the-power-in-stillness-36c67f165c35?sk=0b4772e97d322fa1a107474f162db6d1)

Would love it to get some feedback on it!

Thanks!",30.18180180180181,38.53284375675676,10.587567567567568,41.12207207207209,16.83783783783784,9.257657657657658,33.954954954954964,9.725611199111238,3.785511711711712,357,8,26,4,3,67,33,37,0.0,0.742,0.258,0.9031,4,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,8,3,1,6,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,1,2,20,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710865723551982,0.0,0.1833186643949528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729656678945088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3166800427592549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3536013225961205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39440026373483794,0.0,0.3576747463495299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802106936996397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3230402479044992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492528364558581,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jet_Reinhardt,2020/03/28,"I'm lost and need help I have no purpose in life, I'm lost and need help. I've been feeling like this for years now. I'm 15 years old and I live with my mum. I hardly get to see my dad and I don't know what to do. My whole life I've had medical issues and family issues. My friend died and a week later my grandma died, then when I thought things were going to get better my dog died. I've been feeling suicidal and tried to get help. I told my mum about what I've been feeling and she called me a selfish kid and kicked me out. I play computer games to try and forget what happens in reality but my mum comes in and yells at me for being lazy. I'm teased about being fat everywhere I go. I need help.",-0.2626661573720384,1.7034504415584415,1.9650190985485128,97.10912528647823,86.79220779220779,5.1819709702062635,17.500381970970206,6.522977012572876,-0.3144556149732618,544,13,132,6,17,183,81,154,0.154,0.716,0.13,-0.6956,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,4,8,1,0,2,0,10,4,1,0,0,24,33,14,4,3,1,4,4,1,1,0,4,1,0,1,5,14,1,0,5,2,0,3,2,4,0,0,9,6,21,4,15,22,1,16,0,2,1,0,15,5,0,0,9,70,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633834477469572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431924562962844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133119173743918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4095599613318493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400623500943553,0.0,0.1995349950503789,0.0939737404720858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162914119586876,0.0,0.20617603740868745,0.0,0.14951687401607885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632229157912755,0.0,0.11783593168324585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3526797297862297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745916642653501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229212723009347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18582422582416824,0.06426485156348759,0.0,0.11615413116866745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871875980144339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251488033172087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926105193210848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13803136192724932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048220652164324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438857653575779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873907615198547,0.0,0.0,0.1044297761759626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569416442101272,0.0,0.17861697462915374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551518073227012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686211631704746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941766766038846
mentalhealth,theemorrislivingston,2020/03/28,Struggling to keep myself together For the last two years or so i have been struggling I’m 39 was way overweight was having health problems got my weight under control I’m down over 100 pounds heath is much better but mentally i just feel like there’s a hurdle i can’t get over i don’t know if it’s work or not making enough money to provide for me family but this virus has really brought me into even more of a funk i have a non essential construction job that still requires me to come in it has provided little to no safety measures while everything else is shutdown i think it’s really woken me up to the fact that I’m just a number to my job and i feel like i can’t go on like this with a place that stresses me out for another 20 years i can’t just quit and i don’t have much of a education barley got out of high school and this job is just too good of money but i feel like there’s a dark cloud over me maybe I’m just feeling sorry for myself but i just feel like my entire life I’ve been kicked and pushed down by life time and time again i don’t want to hurt myself but i feel like I’m getting to a point that I’m just going to give it all up and let my family down and I’m not sure what to do this probably doesn’t even belong in the sub but i don’t know where else to turn i talk to my wife but i don’t want her to worry we have enough on our plate she doesn’t need me feeling sorry for myself i just wish i could get past this i run and usually it helps feel better but i almost cried a few times during the run today which is somewhat. Alarming too me because it’s just an overwhelming feeling I’m starting to not be able to shake and i don’t know where to turn too for help again sorry if this isn’t the right place for this and it’s an extremely long rant just want some out side view points i guess,1.5233180608926986,3.0193396557788965,3.1175051729234404,93.56106710020693,78.321608040201,6.290393142181497,19.494827076559265,7.048011613610866,0.1097360922258348,1445,31,336,16,34,477,179,398,0.098,0.765,0.136,0.9433,4,0,0,0,0,2,1.0,2,0,0,6,24,18,0,6,16,0,31,5,0,2,3,73,74,24,0,9,25,1,10,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,20,17,2,3,13,0,2,8,16,8,0,1,8,11,44,10,46,63,9,51,0,2,1,0,9,27,0,8,21,217,64,6,0.07925449319923047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936192665120588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310524644595509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048312803440640525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018831737328916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827072821871641,0.0,0.0,0.08889065326928043,0.06327826382277968,0.0,0.08705733927505784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241391870702635,0.0,0.0,0.16378215507251945,0.0,0.1046936905823289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122882812824602,0.0,0.1494281654379408,0.0,0.3606610778334417,0.2830971288866339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422160476406782,0.0760281316243721,0.09008430981127036,0.06647490869155342,0.12677411649432796,0.0,0.08730775948952225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424382016359823,0.0,0.0,0.10624523235685504,0.08373672343860981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484357415019313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359435659939543,0.07044503507947253,0.0,0.0,0.1306685903347173,0.0646029899136703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104308895241151,0.11195958476087224,0.2323184524683662,0.07943382308806045,0.0,0.07013773248786292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05290298963171191,0.0,0.07962179094654037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798698882890841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165223432805975,0.05876620247719249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565738159149668,0.0,0.0,0.1656081538683864,0.0,0.1498422267787277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544974832805029,0.07583584643856017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429690914578032,0.0,0.0,0.1015449155414195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768290415294909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802097783130743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26615674942683315,0.05609673820705315,0.0,0.06329274064610789,0.0,0.0907857541867374,0.1657080085743713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469642190187449,0.0,0.0,0.06370175952669632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05078307908589151,0.0,0.0,0.13864179699666748,0.0,0.07512399256821882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17241226020026246,0.07742012372737628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728762726849176,0.0,0.14023906050605794,0.06290852770854427,0.0,0.09651062143188294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09113875585060742,0.0,0.0,0.0576982149654981,0.08048678494846842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207459031935104
mentalhealth,DCT1997,2020/03/28,"I feel like I am not making much progress with my Social Anxiety. I am a 22 year old male and I've been dealing with Social Anxiety for as long as I can remember. I've done a lot of research on Social Anxiety for the past couple years just educating myself on it and reading people's stories on how they've overcome their Social Anxiety.

I've been trying to implement things that I've researched to my life.

Many people stated that getting therapy, getting a job that forces you to socialize, stepping out of your comfort zone, and changing the way you think is what needs to be done to overcome this.

I finally got my first job at the age of 21 working in a hospital cafe. I've been working there for 8 months. I still get uncomfortable around lots of people. I still get nervous when I have to go on the line and serve customers. I still get uncomfortable when people look at me. My Social Anxiety is still with me.

I read from many people who overcame Social Anxiety that once they got a job working with the public, it broke them out of their shell. I just don't feel like that's happening with me.

I went to speak to a therapist for several sessions, but I wasn't sure if she was a good fit for me. I just didn't feel comfortable speaking to her, she said things that I would disagree with, and I felt like I wasn't improving. So I stopped seeing her and am currently trying to find another one.

I do have days where I feel good and my Social Anxiety doesn't really bug me, then boom my Social Anxiety comes back full force and I'm back to square one. This is what I am experiencing right now which prompted me to make this post.

I feel like I keep having setbacks and it's discouraging to the point where I just feel like giving up.

What do you guys suggest that I do?",4.954912431108389,5.586359146478873,5.786184935701165,81.06954072259646,68.80281690140845,9.216166564605023,30.082669932639323,9.318704503766252,2.488850581751377,1407,52,281,27,23,462,171,355,0.107,0.802,0.091,0.2992,4,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,4,4,5,19,13,0,1,13,0,27,1,0,3,1,47,55,18,0,3,7,0,7,5,0,1,1,4,0,2,20,19,0,3,10,2,0,4,6,3,0,3,14,15,50,10,43,39,4,46,0,2,3,0,31,17,0,3,27,191,70,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06580112806263534,0.3840419434092196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055862740927907384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650509985998308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638348163057774,0.05405544321886528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943408924566548,0.0,0.04046996220113175,0.06469473807974506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284345264004774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19037631424918275,0.17932066846487718,0.06025192987356104,0.06874194157232906,0.057354352067927925,0.05337696890024071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16392710995573054,0.06019760531763273,0.03566350777974277,0.10526709604572254,0.1003772954321916,0.0,0.0,0.06213452018312796,0.05549154204820525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18681555576180706,0.055777017371047385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04432371775397221,0.15328771744197814,0.0,0.0,0.05553370111787157,0.05269602335156672,0.0,0.0,0.10669931209545726,0.0,0.0,0.08377512959825839,0.127241714364046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05008818824094437,0.0,0.04613006976250979,0.04652994341905006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584785272345338,0.06682901949513817,0.08504499707558051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059904052606633576,0.21752228822319586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059321089673138226,0.0,0.06009923836249648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255383153814244,0.0,0.040200650845766496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108598267109885,0.05359001548374619,0.05969168953742038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05000535976872987,0.0,0.0,0.07089209725178088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5757114683338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004558754493612,0.05246362904315986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059143183295681225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176258223174671,0.07286011302998358,0.08337951482334552,0.04020906059786226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520921676834828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049809756483590116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817189589538916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13705299464092954,0.0,0.0,0.044577345425610836,0.0,0.0,0.08082068794432375
mentalhealth,MoreSmoke100,2020/03/28,Got drunk and high and blasted a girl with hate words i would later regret So i was drunk and smoked some weed got kinda ish rejected and I completely lose it cursing out creating a whole seen that i want to kill everyone blasted a girl that’s a good friend of mine on the phone calling her a bitch and saying i hate woman now the question is this: what caused the Rage? Weed? Alcohol? Rejection?,1.92448717948718,4.530831192307698,2.918205128205128,89.57679487179489,83.23076923076924,6.5435897435897425,22.76923076923077,7.793537801064563,1.2923999999999998,315,11,62,6,9,100,57,78,0.379,0.524,0.09699999999999999,-0.9834,0,1,2,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,11,5,0,8,0,3,3,0,1,0,15,9,6,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,3,5,7,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,0,0,4,2,7,2,5,4,2,5,0,4,1,0,9,3,1,3,2,37,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355260871230392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22503920218839613,0.0,0.0,0.2263975884239329,0.0,0.0,0.23107099574771764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105886937381844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027002159372856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18484969485614267,0.3525263473225537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4351719776281076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328503803999511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438249496827693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465560605583317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468832574817936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17526014763289716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299896359479109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24605359665895565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655620814013824,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rachelemmaDel,2020/03/28,"COVID-19 Is a bitch. If anyone during this time is having a hard time coping, anxious, suicidal, just bored or depressed. Please vent to me and I will do my best to help you and your feelings/thoughts! Any age + any gender 🙏🏼❤️ #letsworktogether",1.6062499999999993,4.265183791666669,2.5258333333333347,91.2025,86.08333333333334,4.866666666666667,22.583333333333336,6.42735559955562,0.571558333333333,194,7,38,2,6,61,42,48,0.302,0.5379999999999999,0.16,-0.8016,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,1,1,4,1,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,5,4,1,1,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,5,1,2,4,1,3,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,2,3,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4081954221273352,0.0,0.0,0.33905984197173505,0.0,0.20985686586073932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31496640481611743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25850028694012056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26885623641747664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20116984576899666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32945102940938936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3282919292569806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23826855010627254,0.3500147510968177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SmashinGashin,2020/03/28,"Work in delivery feel like it's enevitable before I get the virus.. Feel like there isn't much point in what I'm doing, everyone is going to catch the virus I feel even with preventive measures.  I feel useless, I call my family who are at home and tell them that I feel okay. Truth is I don't. Things are pretty stressfull. The work load keeps increasing. The risk keeps Increasing. I have no say on when my work stops or I resort myself to a very low pay. I know there are other like myself and I'm definitely not the only one I just find it hard to carry on being in the job I am. ( I am thankful to have my job just the risk is frightening)",1.8538471177944869,3.678579390977447,3.371597744360905,90.63052944862156,78.3984962406015,6.8393483709273175,20.10588972431077,7.793537801064563,0.6077573934837089,501,12,110,8,12,165,79,133,0.139,0.728,0.133,0.2961,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,3,6,10,0,2,8,1,14,0,0,0,1,19,27,4,0,0,4,0,6,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,7,3,0,4,7,0,1,4,4,4,0,1,0,7,18,6,11,26,3,14,0,2,0,0,5,8,0,1,5,71,25,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882828157805516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16659396903548887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775876318393872,0.0,0.0,0.15589642152425004,0.0,0.0,0.15380291021238815,0.0,0.4124666651590495,0.23310819439120514,0.0,0.0,0.14911576635853152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523892519625195,0.0,0.09272166979258008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14614998366084064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365233766533147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32380158041740337,0.29002969750669666,0.0,0.0,0.0896627460110098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391199408823144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199337183107277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055438215799912,0.12408261233643295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422909385074593,0.0,0.0,0.16598178280727074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974309953101856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364003596702671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259992971154942,0.1502062194124758,0.0,0.0,0.10838933579757284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461549527079025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3563245262261797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrsDramaQueen,2020/03/28,It has only been 2 weeks since the lockdown And I already feel so overwhelmed about everything. I don't know how to cope with this. I can't anymore. I'm too tired I'm shaking. I just want to drop everything and lie down and rest. God help me and this entire world.,-0.18013636363636465,2.132119054545456,1.2512500000000024,98.336875,94.8181818181818,4.204545454545455,19.602272727272727,5.985473137389443,-0.10604545454545457,208,7,46,2,8,66,42,55,0.125,0.73,0.14400000000000002,0.0042,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,2,1,0,4,1,0,1,0,10,9,6,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,1,5,0,5,8,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,27,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487175677327563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3133904223277643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.568006891248894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597807945945441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118103923890839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736671834758283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403347963505974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26140124641838114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3631993784844538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18638697018921235,0.0,0.2534788358543181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrGrimmis,2020/03/28,"I want to hurt a tea cup Chihuahua.. I met a girl about 2 months ago who has a female Chihuahua. It doesn't bark like one would expect from the breed, it just shakes like a pathetic waste of life. She dresses it in pink bedazzled cloths and this thing hates treats and playing. It just prances around in a very annoying way and shakes in fear from everything around it at all times. It just grinds my fucking gears so hard. I LOVE DOGS. Anyone who has ever abused an animal is a piece of shit. Dogs fill my heart with love and warmth. I feel them as close to a family member as any human being in my life. I have been in a few fights in self defense in my life, so I am not a total stranger to some violence. This dog is filling me with an indescribable rage. Almost pleasurable rage. I have been having incredibly strong compulsions to hurt or kill this dog. Currently I have just been fucking with it or scaring it more because I fucking hate the thing. Just like spinning it in circles on the floor to make it dizzy or flicking it lightly between the eyes when its frozen shaking. I feel I have to stay away from this chick, which is fine because I don't like her that much anyhow. I just have been finding myself making excuses to see her and when she is in the bathroom or shower I just fuck with this dog while no one is around. I hate the fucking thing. I want to kill it and it is all I have thought about a lot recently. Any advice or something. No one else I have ever met understands where I'm coming from. I have literally formulated plans and they would probably work. I have currently cut off contact with her and have no intention of following through with any of this. It is just an insanely strange primal urge. I have even caught mice (pests) in the past and let them go outside because I don't want them getting hurt. Any insight would be appreciated, it's becoming an obsession.",3.9504060066740787,5.570125241935487,4.416522061549872,86.24564516129033,72.11827956989248,7.819206525769374,27.61253244345569,8.433251757073789,1.8331057471264367,1498,55,302,25,29,473,190,372,0.23399999999999999,0.69,0.075,-0.9964,3,0,1,0,2,0,34.0,0,0,4,3,21,37,17,6,21,0,35,14,3,3,5,60,63,21,2,7,14,0,3,4,0,3,3,0,1,4,29,20,1,1,6,1,0,9,7,26,0,3,8,7,37,11,45,49,9,43,0,3,3,7,22,20,6,9,16,214,66,1,0.0,0.10502928685631027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662242038456014,0.07857803786448521,0.0,0.08876470400789459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411253128970112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061982324765601886,0.0,0.0,0.2367373080026537,0.0,0.0,0.08328446508921622,0.0,0.0,0.1621106698699918,0.09790093205036936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763594236991183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405114011540957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05854888388028644,0.1603681262391837,0.0,0.0,0.07966799840206354,0.0,0.08356618491532032,0.09974975425632374,0.08964268768253872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101950534030314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40975225281064187,0.04631311445990709,0.0,0.05037873596048456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07940809795541262,0.2625543988891003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504420892589464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846874463940191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19614410360106116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064504991622416,0.18783678436556586,0.17322898220081884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536241954129433,0.16001031990806333,0.0,0.11834184007225765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075522760447274,0.0,0.06516393784809509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18020350713500768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462124555641054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557380897800087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752579094200763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874865057986349,0.0,0.07063822302496038,0.0,0.0924755898293802,0.0,0.09099234837595872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682428991140304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448328710462757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766744842266157,0.0,0.0,0.07037386455545554,0.0516893452264527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228209430708324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731410306523589,0.15685454249208688,0.07036191127469964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453428223467267,0.0,0.0,0.1889116176304821,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sire_PineCone,2020/03/28,"For the Crew I'm so sorry. I can't fight anymore. It's so hard. The pills, the counseling, nothing really helps. I'm so sorry because I feel like a burden. I don't know why you guys haven't left me yet, I'm a pain to manage. But thank you, even though I know it wont last.

U/bi_spaghettiman ,I'm sorry. I know you're doing your best to try and keep me happy, but its all on me.",-0.7491895424836592,0.9887438588235328,2.253333333333334,95.72888888888893,86.88235294117645,5.189542483660131,15.326797385620914,6.42735559955562,-0.6198888888888883,288,5,72,3,9,102,56,85,0.14800000000000002,0.7190000000000001,0.133,0.2092,0,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,3,0,1,6,7,1,0,5,0,5,2,0,0,1,9,15,7,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,2,11,4,4,14,2,4,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,3,39,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827619554405248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233888917480396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19339653620738312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171900682683227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09318041771997262,0.13165378418487034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824718763464175,0.0,0.19617561892388272,0.16508384407298715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235228607438661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16380165142830555,0.0,0.0,0.3038359035876526,0.15021749117062969,0.0,0.0,0.20022701808984508,0.0,0.0,0.09003271398913097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17682715749697814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19609304237599934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805817713815857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6188784638366799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16966556877505862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810598241061016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511793460305118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16628923511268065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,szulu2222,2020/03/28,"Depresses and alone ?  

\-When failures knock you down, get up, blow off the dust, because you are alone.

\-When no one seems to understand, talk to yourself, because you are alone.

\-When opportunities don’t knock your door, create something, because you are alone.

\-When the hands giving you support leave you, embrace yourself, because you are alone.

\-When everything seems out of your reach, rest a while and accept, because you are alone.

\-When life gives you lemons, make a lemonade, gulp it, because you are alone.

Because…

*When you are lying on the floor, crying, shaking and wishing it all would end, who’s going to be there for you? You. You have to pick yourself up and find the strength to carry on. At the end of the day, you are all you got.*

*So don’t worry,if you think, you are alone*",2.4318904403866815,5.334357251700684,2.0368922305764414,94.23924812030077,85.3265306122449,4.183172216254923,22.70282849982098,5.750287758089431,0.2613210884353747,624,22,118,4,19,182,78,147,0.188,0.69,0.122,-0.8504,0,8,1,0,0,0,47.0,0,20,0,2,9,6,0,1,8,0,14,3,1,2,2,17,26,13,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,5,1,0,6,0,0,2,3,2,0,1,1,1,20,4,16,23,3,22,0,1,0,0,24,9,0,2,11,80,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8056109314742727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3556244792892613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680302370930042,0.06270556133374644,0.0,0.08374439704574961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17223454154758497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738440989255343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888668198768954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05079886853615792,0.18654450990734647,0.05525827435531098,0.0,0.07776402933065821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295294971963047,0.0,0.0,0.06867670368329737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490204390553203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588583223462917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770298004249735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485270859123458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033590041598912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781501087640423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062301311351881376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122027057811156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181015619136148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906968318352104,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowAwayTheWillows,2020/03/28,"My handle on reality is weakening and I'm not sure what to do All my life, my sense of identity has been variable at best and entirely nonexistent at worst. I've always been a tad unstable, mentally and emotionally speaking, so it hasn't been a large concern for me until recently. I'm 19 now, and for the past 3 or 4 years, I've tried to identify with fictional characters that I see or read about to gain some sort of understanding of myself.

What I'm finding is that this may not be so good for me. I don't know how to explain it without sounding crazy, but my relationships with these characters get unhealthily strong. For some, I've literally worshipped them as deities. Others, I've used as moral compasses or role models. And more recently, I've convinced myself that I quite literally *am* the character. Again, I'm well-aware that this sounds absurd (and it most likely is), but I can't stop convincing myself of all of it.

As you might expect, I don't wholly live in reality. I spend most of my day every day playing through imaginary scenarios, daydreams, elaborate fantasies, and fictional plotlines. I see ulterior motives in others, every single little thing has symbolic significance, and everything is foreshadowing. I don't know how else to say it.

I went to therapy last year, but that particular therapist that I had wasn't helpful for me and didn't seem to understand my problems. I don't actually have the means of seeing a therapist since I'm a broke student, so I don't know how to move forward. Do I keep living in my fantasies as somebody who I only think I am? Do I try to find another way to cope again? Or am I just going batshit crazy?",4.779312957157785,6.395772347962384,6.276508620689652,73.7370617816092,70.0344827586207,10.206948798328108,32.72740334378265,10.411451182825502,3.7941691745036565,1325,62,238,39,24,451,173,319,0.067,0.8290000000000001,0.105,0.9138,0,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,1,5,11,12,0,0,7,0,29,1,0,5,3,52,51,27,0,2,11,0,0,1,0,2,1,4,0,0,20,11,0,2,12,4,1,4,12,3,0,0,7,7,32,9,38,41,10,25,2,1,3,0,9,8,0,12,15,164,52,3,0.0,0.0,0.1182524248698343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082995429479284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706588890340084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12716902526483434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629980434617755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122882130331427,0.13630914392183674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20419568837947516,0.0,0.10890713581541474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22150932491773426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331059832914424,0.0,0.06886835303389896,0.10163850928662714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122318065653984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770873541690948,0.0,0.0,0.1997890782194211,0.09877639126593914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559173317744433,0.059201538478786425,0.12145237239918145,0.21400510850191684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13199856413042718,0.0,0.0,0.12211910542456204,0.12855090082123702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879322947002342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216146744196924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156782857298804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595115411545075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888791202109645,0.12121097392275698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392976701477145,0.13010001714006136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636575357413917,0.0,0.0,0.28968996471761443,0.11031606519952768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023984386319984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131038563840082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420900187135065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13857781119801513,0.28139441679311344,0.08050539921806296,0.07764608567158135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16454406163259802,0.0,0.0,0.25230152080166,0.0,0.10465904167763827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618560000407128,0.0,0.0,0.10895373798047496,0.11233338817698807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11681144260253105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560695516595764
mentalhealth,skylerr351,2020/03/28,"i’ve been isolating myself from my mom for several days i’ve been isolating myself from my family. i ignore them when they talk to me, and lock myself in rooms. my sister is visiting my mom and i (i used to live with my sister and her grandparents) and i’m acting the way i did when i was living with them, i locked myself in my room 24/7. i was diagnosed with reactive attachment disorder and anxiety and i’m 15 years old. what is going on with me and any advice???",2.603815789473685,4.298642052631582,4.9401973684210505,80.79450657894739,75.84210526315789,9.381578947368425,22.40131578947368,9.827888789773867,2.2035526315789475,365,10,73,11,8,128,54,95,0.08199999999999999,0.894,0.024,-0.6416,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,1,0,13,11,9,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,11,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,5,0,23,0,12,6,0,14,0,0,0,0,10,5,0,0,5,53,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22189608259374066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441949702081292,0.0,0.17371255249841913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14644526316193754,0.0,0.0,0.2304774052415572,0.0,0.0,0.26024881992848764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21406708549232464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905254905170588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4010246150167833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5318974377070628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382781103873867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565312956444617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18251512307130852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19612079445488773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18024239459426508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14622952766934305
mentalhealth,LaneThrowaway,2020/03/28,"[USA] When does social media posts cross the line from free speech to something that should be reported? So I work in transit and see some familiar faces, mostly those that are homeless or have a consistent work schedule.  

I encountered a passenger that I’d seen a few times that started talking to me about life and mental health issues( they are homeless).  They listed off about 3-5 different diagnoses and continued to talk about their legal issues. 

They at some point mentioned their Twitter handle talking about educating the public in homelessness so after work I took a peep. 

The individual has a felony for arson of an occupied house as a major charge. A few other’s that come with it. 

The Twitter is full of arson references and visiting shallow graves and ramming pencils in the eyes of those that are loud at the shelter. 

Reading this I’m mega shook and want to tell work but at the same time I’m kinda afraid I’ll be laughed out and nothing would happen. I’ve also thought about going to their PO but again same concerns. 

Some of the shit could be taken sarcastic but with his record and frequency it scares me.  What should I do?",5.112029826014911,7.1514946244131465,5.140602043634356,80.52328086164043,69.89201877934272,8.016459541563105,29.430820215410108,8.671277953709913,2.4245655343827672,917,36,159,16,17,286,136,213,0.079,0.856,0.065,-0.4514,1,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,6,4,10,7,1,3,16,0,14,6,3,0,0,30,26,17,1,5,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,13,12,0,0,2,1,1,6,0,5,0,0,4,5,13,3,28,15,10,25,0,1,3,0,15,10,1,6,8,110,26,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334298857929504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13286121186432673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314540998055812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565469471268301,0.0,0.16114446551000472,0.0,0.0,0.13497352665257645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765623923874903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639095502174586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16394634026984906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17796837910724767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3219659690480334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108941903062038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543426042798442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479942198192701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458034823833415,0.0,0.14771607012145652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542783827472261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441778756510569,0.0,0.12290663627870192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583216987499405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722483520262728,0.0,0.1187389039649046,0.0,0.0,0.10916949056040244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719087164923427,0.13480962521691608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244666703163938,0.17987325505023044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17136258672040913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097276883614401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4491444554782363,0.0,0.0,0.10956528671795956,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PumaSportsCanada,2020/03/28,"I think my partner may have anxiety disorder? how can I support? We've been together for 2 months now.  During these 2 months she has had what seems like 3 significant anxiety periods

* Around the time we first dated. She said she was having a lot of stomach pains for a few days before our first date. also it seemed she was really freaking out after the first date, worrying if I liked her or not.  After talking to her a bit more she calmed down. probably lasted 2 or 3 days.
* A few days after becoming 'Official'. it was that lovey-dovey period, super happy romantic sweet talk, then thinking about the future. then it all went to a full stop because she panicked about us going too fast.  I came down to visit her, and a heard to heart talk and it got her to calm down. then it was the first time she told me she has anxiety issues. lasted maybe 4 or 5 days. Around this time she started going to a therapist as she acknowledged she has anxiety issues.
* Currently, for last two weeks. she's been having a lot of anxiety. again like last time, came after a long trip together where she had a great time and we talked about the future. then she said she needed time alone.  Right now she's a bit isolating herself and doesn't want to go out. she thinks all men are scary but she knows i won't hurt her.  and she apologized for how difficult her mind and heart is.

Prior to me, it seems she had a past anxiety attack when there was news some one killed a bunch of people at a studio, by arson.  Although she doesn't work there, she is in the same industry and knew some of the people who died, so she suffered from anxiety or depression  for a while thinking some one would attack her work place.

I also think she might have some trauma from her last relationship. It seemed to have ended 3 or 4 years ago, but she claimed he was emotionally abusive.  It seemed she hasn't really dated anyone since then, so her family and friends were completely surprised she started dating again, and chose me out of all people.  But i also am very similar to her sister's husband, so they seem supportive since they like him.

TLDR:  I think she might be having deeper anxiety disorder rather than just anxiety.  what can I do to support her.  we have great times together and I feel we really match in a lot of areas.. but I also want to support her when she's not feeling great.",3.3219444444444437,5.357960058823533,4.387210784313727,84.0466985294118,74.77342047930283,7.988692810457518,23.67543572984749,8.769984970463412,1.726800827886711,1853,56,357,39,40,603,214,459,0.158,0.7190000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.9285,1,1,0,0,0,0,52.0,6,0,2,7,26,28,3,0,23,0,38,4,3,2,3,75,74,39,2,6,14,2,2,4,2,5,1,3,1,2,14,21,0,1,17,0,0,8,6,10,0,7,21,6,66,18,46,47,18,83,0,3,0,0,69,16,0,22,63,260,80,2,0.0,0.06748570182681367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050489669997603334,0.0,0.0,0.05899112301233581,0.0,0.1821965894369136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3921531814278356,0.0,0.0,0.03982623145282094,0.0,0.0,0.10140906952303563,0.0,0.1295954838572377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03472095786247515,0.06290543625186408,0.048466908915957216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436637303165518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13028914263781574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05971918966275633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14693232527725636,0.0,0.04905768613322221,0.0,0.0591132237501045,0.0,0.13055719057457815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406988017921175,0.05044772174981999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05369476273522705,0.0,0.057599169459984986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19379316733201296,0.0,0.0,0.04400546974982224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971113235708913,0.0,0.04555437113331919,0.18838858992299493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06063265756262098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499057975904993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060974523380537375,0.0,0.0,0.11889833007733225,0.0,0.0,0.06301538783567191,0.0,0.03130252780393954,0.2321411231433101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130685345469901,0.0,0.0,0.05040587754905818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14527050291417246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722178494125866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12084649019979565,0.05751116044605192,0.0,0.09092637559914836,0.0,0.0,0.04223350115575971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719218460971941,0.0,0.06060713535156345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05437268324640058,0.1184621403255348,0.0,0.059508798109918916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06141016251939541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946591221913207,0.0,0.0,0.06115138184901898,0.0,0.04864166630263618,0.10835985835459934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.311113555957572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423219309749102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063007504428807,0.0,0.0,0.04761928717331064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585402325544013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18312214988802766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613241800334466,0.0,0.21897762375570465,0.0,0.0,0.2324879365356015,0.0,0.0,0.05442563702764914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055639512969860604,0.0,0.06851324335089783,0.0,0.0,0.04699616586622927,0.06719039486757063,0.0,0.045688126842595884,0.0,0.0,0.0528004689454404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293194134422321,0.057843430098512665,0.0,0.040461200491863206,0.0,0.0,0.03667896806756505
mentalhealth,throwaway1122lmnop,2020/03/28,"I want to try antidepressants, but I don't want to talk to anyone Does anyone know of a text-based doctor service that can prescribe them? My biggest obstacle to starting treatment is having to physically speak the words to a total stranger. 

I know they hear it all the time, but I just can't make myself do that. Looking for a way to have a consultation where I literally don't have to speak, text only. No video calls, no regular calls, just text. Does such a thing exist?",3.5183695652173914,5.593173010869566,4.542826086956524,82.9755434782609,74.32608695652173,7.208695652173913,25.630434782608692,8.07648339933343,1.5833434782608693,375,13,72,6,8,122,59,92,0.109,0.861,0.031,-0.8229,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,7,0,9,1,0,1,2,12,17,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,9,0,10,17,2,5,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,0,2,49,13,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220501666209458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4703064821465043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23571297967035784,0.4030590667586863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595551156757081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25312423312905424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933867538776671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15372128045224107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751469673282851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16300141988976136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18509948321776215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299535606325992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13428475219071626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15635272628972902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716636381735231,0.18279457357785972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helpmeplease2023,2020/03/28,"How do I tell my boyfriend I'm suicidal and want to be hospitalized? Hi everyone. Been struggling with suicidal thoughts for a long time. Attempted 10 times. I'm at my witts end with being on lockdown and my mental health is rapidly deteriorating. My boyfriend and I have talked about everything, like his past addiction, my past with self harming, etc, so we are very open with each other. He is fully aware of my past attempts and my past/current struggle with depression. The last few months I've become increasingly suicidal. he is the only thing keeping me here. A small problem is his late fiance passed away due to an overdose two years ago. he is a year sober from various drugs. I worry if i'm voluntarily hospitalized he would relapse, though he frequently goes to NA meetings and his parole officers aren't concerned about his sobriety. What is the easiest, healthiest way to break this to him? I only have a few months left in me of fighting this myself.",4.983895131086144,7.273327876404501,5.5447415730337095,76.44538951310862,70.79775280898876,9.016329588014981,32.091385767790264,9.558583805096642,3.3360167790262176,774,36,134,19,15,249,118,178,0.179,0.787,0.034,-0.983,1,1,1,0,2,0,21.0,1,0,0,2,6,7,1,2,8,0,15,3,0,1,0,20,21,9,3,4,1,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,13,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,6,0,1,2,0,20,1,20,16,6,27,0,1,0,0,17,7,0,1,17,84,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606828198885398,0.0,0.0,0.11064219329510372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11726910133302232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13784988963924605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750416851645404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447473786890452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105502686273478,0.0,0.13920326171594655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926740365916742,0.11217691759925033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267397935739042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094253693403956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10174201186018372,0.14079831760401784,0.0,0.1356133662629645,0.0,0.0,0.060978980430993,0.0,0.0,0.110458571966443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578555779598702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992544935457436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18985696872216296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4766054466196564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194324225254841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021070979942884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609703698889262,0.0,0.409586596245553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032268137961624,0.10909502099142608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292245927471333,0.0,0.12263146340715543,0.09909026665308644,0.14556287434169554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192747049344882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298658850705343,0.07361993707688108,0.0990734357772355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675709653311762,0.0,0.08866597793142987,0.0,0.0,0.16075531786954078
mentalhealth,TravelingMonk,2020/03/28,"At what point is normal not normal? I guess I am a “high functioning” person, I have mood swings, and “issues”.  Those around me think that I am intelligent and just a normal egotistic, selfish person.  I have a category 5 storm in my head that no one understands.  I see myself, I see other angles.  I see my flaw, I see my reasoning, I am so torn.  I am chaotic and completely aware of my chaos and yet I have no control of it.  I have no drive to keep me anchored.  I question the everything, in deep neurotic ways.  I have no friends, no one that gets me.  I stumble on my own dilemma.  I check out the other flying color with my psychiatrist.  What do I do?",0.6391923076923085,3.0368072846153886,3.1910576923076945,86.65581730769233,87.69230769230768,6.3269230769230775,21.971153846153847,7.645422480735847,1.227269230769231,497,18,101,10,16,172,75,130,0.235,0.718,0.047,-0.9667,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,5,0,12,1,1,2,0,19,21,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,9,7,0,2,4,0,1,1,6,1,0,2,0,5,28,1,10,21,1,12,0,0,5,0,4,9,0,2,1,80,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235431465053602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766319533177332,0.0,0.17935330719591994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14371731360540727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354651347408042,0.0,0.08354667530727353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761595267038422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16411438402502995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895430205658055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16690509409917306,0.0,0.14213586639712938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4700352334466888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21671908810874413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792554918871151,0.0,0.0,0.15116718092369694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17913644111573146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16441470404145025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.509712097937883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024642394747059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16647254799552394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269295711122061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway10021990,2020/03/28,Friend showing signs of manic episode Lately my friend has felt very high and sleeping very little. She has random mood swings and a few minutes ago she pulled something where she dressed up as a random made up character and said the strangest things. She claims she was completely joking around but I’m honestly worried. She stopped acting like the character but she is still acting high. She is also only 12 years old. Should she tell her parents? And should I have a conversation with her about manic episodes and stuff? She does have a history of depression. This has been going on about a week.,3.9825840978593265,6.996633366972477,3.324977064220185,87.40257262996944,77.71559633027522,6.2021406727828765,25.59709480122325,7.492282038375204,1.5082287461773702,483,18,84,7,12,142,73,109,0.087,0.799,0.114,0.2974,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,7,0,11,1,1,1,0,17,16,9,0,2,2,1,1,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,1,1,2,0,4,0,1,0,0,5,2,14,5,10,9,1,19,0,1,0,0,18,8,0,2,8,56,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16074596228661936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145016624666823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143003574636988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013034962939107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561868985361575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15869086260992216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17411374794210413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28020391423218544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305905582317584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38318893371728335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045581380624753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859300956275129,0.18174918196146306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17158721846667194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19028463413005275,0.0,0.0,0.13791637812468796,0.0,0.0,0.20135534935564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249478660960416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814698255621916,0.0,0.0,0.13960351754050976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14481745167642834,0.15160741079195095,0.0,0.0,0.2075896152558447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15849816067160136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204734840689087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29924710960904266,0.0,0.0,0.14545909915305089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841584196051506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167762835047407
mentalhealth,milktastesbettericed,2020/03/28,"Isolation has worsened my mental health tw for mentions of self harm, eating disorders, and suicide

Before COVID-19 became a full quarantine in my state, I was already suffering from depression, anxiety, anorexia, trauma, and a cutting addiction. All of these things have increased a monumental amount. Before now, it had been years since I was truly suicidal. Now it's abnormal to not think about killing myself. 

My parents won't let me go grocery shopping with them anymore, and I know why. It's crazy out there. We disinfect EVERYTHING after anyone goes out. I've had my time with my dad cut down to one day a week, because nobody involved is equipped for me to be quarantined there in case of full lockdown. 

I'm so lonely. I live with my mom, stepdad, and two brothers, and the only human physical contact I ever get is from my mom (which is a hug every other day on average). My best friend hates phone calls and facetime, so the only person I really talk to is my SO anymore. I love him, but it's different when you're physically alone. 

I've come so close to suicide. There isnt much to stop me. If I fail, a hospital is not really able option unless I'm in immediate physical danger and need life saving medical care. If I succeed, funerals aren't allowed right now, and that makes me sad to think about. I feel like I have nothing to live for though. I'm constantly tired but I'm unable to fall asleep. I always have a bad taste in my mouth and I'm never hungry, and when I do eat it's out of boredom and mentally it hurts a lot to do. I have no motivation for mentally stimulating things. I don't see a point in being alive during this, and it's really hard to see an end. 

I'm alone with my thoughts so much during this too. I'm reliving trauma in my mind. I'm dreaming of people who hurt me or that I miss when I finally sleep. This period is the worst part of my life, worse than when trauma was fresh, worse than having bad things happen to me, worse than anything. And the end is indefinite.",3.6140672588832494,5.3752661015228425,5.05502220812183,80.75050285532997,73.26395939086294,8.376776649746194,27.54092639593909,9.017664075816787,2.3470256345177667,1580,60,299,34,32,529,217,394,0.25,0.655,0.095,-0.9969,3,8,0,0,0,3,52.0,1,0,1,4,20,28,5,0,14,0,28,14,3,4,3,50,53,29,5,3,8,5,2,1,1,1,6,0,0,3,19,23,3,1,6,2,1,4,8,20,0,2,7,5,40,8,46,42,11,42,0,8,2,2,20,16,0,6,22,198,59,3,0.08699428587903332,0.0,0.0,0.09483661244702396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18019968813356507,0.09600035771747001,0.0,0.07238621481829682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06655039058362901,0.0,0.17254991106012074,0.06082842740451624,0.0,0.07158888488490367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14527318991048818,0.05303090922008993,0.0,0.14805145970228542,0.0,0.09129513590912244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08883089242674969,0.0,0.08869647231889954,0.0,0.0,0.07493787428428687,0.0,0.09400991774897974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11220823506853914,0.0,0.07492805095363557,0.0,0.0,0.09089051295368847,0.09970298844884568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17803374520305948,0.0,0.0,0.15410223203354598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869131209444526,0.07329643788586948,0.0,0.07818485472413984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04398692482626244,0.062148735214261626,0.0,0.09529798793338108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721156947148457,0.0,0.0454509238150573,0.0,0.04944085744915944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692875969978802,0.0,0.07792979272846136,0.08588884682291065,0.0,0.09247085785320616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862583645842436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962462880493831,0.0,0.047809784421993545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895755135450753,0.12289327368608738,0.04250101382938352,0.0,0.1536350964807754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395943090925147,0.07851573948951522,0.0,0.058069361345955424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08763759076007002,0.2630093366749774,0.0,0.08783942945458792,0.2037733124102165,0.0,0.0,0.12790161962382696,0.06450516067870933,0.0670953562975189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347336354979726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05894957954144753,0.13232614904732484,0.0,0.0,0.09659685938903373,0.09420633407572113,0.0,0.0603108842264061,0.075960054903541,0.0,0.0,0.0822377191938573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671923014503293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429264481199198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386463653148556,0.0,0.09075401292060027,0.0,0.0,0.07196257225328165,0.0,0.08705711211189382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273111834113465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854728870231276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992271170458587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17338541396519505,0.11148485143195637,0.08547144418203548,0.06906374563192327,0.05072706768557949,0.09998713424151684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498077653968138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978156871772825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784988119102447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26596382832150395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05602146788639771
mentalhealth,CrangisMcbasketbaIl,2020/03/28,"Struggling with emetophobia and anxiety and fear that I’m getting depressed due to it Okay so I’ve struggled with the fear of throwing up and nausea as long as I can remember, but lately it’s been getting worse. Everyday, literally everyday, I think “am I going to throw up” or I feel nausea..it’s hard because I’m also underweight, around 93 lbs and I want to gain weight, but I can’t eat a lot because I get full quick and stay full for a long time. I feel like it’s all mental, I don’t like eating in restaurants due to it, I don’t like going to places, don’t like going on cars full, I’m a very anxious person. Any advice?? I REALLY JUST WANNA GET BETTER AND BE NORMAL :(",1.6844010989010982,3.5852448357142883,3.9499999999999993,85.92423076923076,79.21428571428571,6.593406593406595,22.91208791208791,7.61054688173877,1.083686813186814,527,17,108,8,13,182,82,140,0.163,0.6609999999999999,0.17600000000000002,0.7032,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,5,11,0,4,4,1,8,3,0,0,1,22,22,13,0,3,4,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,9,3,0,4,0,0,6,4,5,0,0,1,4,11,6,17,20,5,25,0,1,0,0,1,9,0,2,13,63,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13701843376044326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213148765441952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535237114845783,0.0,0.107265624474497,0.15840530363978975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124822861530081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17094996870965382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401054566139802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076870031437135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28695400116009817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3155662248991309,0.14179586081535234,0.10017105586601677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930303899472055,0.0,0.23906566448356456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560689439804484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581708882375548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27401178260429443,0.0,0.0,0.2481752728114358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920748282145804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413057609111645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373828932941172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243207970517518,0.1464969257923943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982660339592145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883853216467478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945267008403615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29317051447379483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08984539462069696,0.0,0.0,0.0817616627841743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569371323405182,0.0827036220148051,0.0,0.0,0.17074653651801106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14289310642328998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chibichad,2020/03/28,"Emergency help with jobs and housing in Austin TX Hi r/mental health This is my first post and sorry for the formatting I'm on moble. I also have Depression, anxiety and adhd

I live in Austin TX currently and am 26 years old. I lost my job at the beginning of the year due to mental health issues and have had trouble finding employment...   I live with my parents and my father just threatened the wellbeing of myself and my signifigant other because we are unemployed and living there during this global health crisis. 

I was going to call Integral Care for assistence with housing and a job but missed the window to call and now they wont be available untill Monday. I dont know if I will have a home by monday. 

If any of you have advice or suggestions I would greatly appreciate them.",5.138781818181818,6.685637326666669,6.012181818181817,76.24609090909094,69.06666666666666,9.187878787878788,28.96969696969697,9.573946990214177,2.845333333333333,629,23,108,14,11,207,100,150,0.115,0.804,0.08,-0.3242,8,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,1,2,2,4,6,0,0,7,0,14,3,0,0,0,22,21,16,0,3,5,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,0,3,14,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,3,0,18,2,17,14,0,18,0,3,0,0,11,5,0,3,11,78,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384476191064553,0.12509120608333524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237062740867063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705210519863578,0.0,0.09792832955787796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780345285627276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26142779425330875,0.0,0.13051609908962838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025598501479114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500283445167692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700005142202427,0.10888638579132633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275179814040596,0.0,0.0,0.1411329612455374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40821022519630695,0.0,0.0,0.08580330707977972,0.0,0.12840581777342527,0.0,0.0,0.2954158130585686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361058717374313,0.3810945262650428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035168815552842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3391090922506198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973950630433388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25801065701575715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13432637414418727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421414509749292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12259948417704472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432982217700619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093558760591948,0.0,0.0,0.16487022003578675
mentalhealth,AutomaticVillage8,2020/03/28,"i want someone to talk to because this whole quarantine situation is hard. I’ve battled with depression, anxiety, and multiple eating disorders for awhile now. In the past year, I started to progress and I managed to get over my eating disorder. I’ve had a few slips ups here and there where I almost relapsed, but overall everything has been going well. After being forced in lockdown and to stay in the house, my anxiety and depression are starting to come back.  Im not good at dealing with the thoughts in my mind. I’m so used to living out my daily life without taking time to reflect on anything. I just ignore my thoughts most of the time. I can’t do that anymore and I find it harder than ever to remain positive. I just keep crying on Somedays. I’ll have panic attacks here and there throughout the day. I feel like when I want to go to talk to somebody they aren’t there for me. I feel like I scare everyone away . They don’t really understand what it’s like to go through this. I just need advice. I want at least somebody to talk to me about this or just to be there for me. I’ve tried to find ways to cope with anxiety and depression. I just don’t have the motivation in me because I’m so focused on my thoughts. It’s like you keep reading a book and you can’t put it down. But instead it’s not as enjoyable as reading a book. I feel trapped in my mind while I’m physically trapped inside my house. Do u have any ideas on what I could do? Or any positive feedback?",2.729829633453793,4.624152328859065,4.045771812080538,86.47066597831699,76.0469798657718,7.2691791430046475,28.57563242127001,8.139509932561175,1.9700605059370164,1166,51,236,20,26,383,150,298,0.18899999999999997,0.693,0.11800000000000001,-0.9758,1,4,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,2,2,21,15,2,2,9,0,19,3,0,2,1,52,44,19,0,5,12,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,14,2,3,12,4,0,5,8,8,1,0,5,4,33,7,49,36,4,38,0,3,0,0,8,18,0,4,17,161,44,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09427832027549256,0.0,0.0,0.09660994412835903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312182768324306,0.0,0.22141888404091986,0.0,0.09568140375344973,0.0,0.0,0.07939412958080386,0.0,0.0,0.10975897469937933,0.09064534838435152,0.0741865200992245,0.0,0.1176256030577038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310825501755077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703076009389469,0.0,0.10597782889383946,0.062221077820863724,0.09946577940089214,0.2492920819851105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22114695590600814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19744453708327286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727092535879594,0.0,0.09218997359654864,0.08670924958818116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463482891987523,0.1378494648943656,0.0,0.0,0.1763604119839757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050406379995183485,0.0,0.16449399299411493,0.08092214347131355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864263785088426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226479982887554,0.0,0.10891323015636784,0.10421405062076693,0.0,0.0,0.171510223864877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814608518717075,0.188539380363902,0.0,0.08519286742463411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19483290054409166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153807597072916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319750874246885,0.0,0.0,0.09210027675583618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09698820530389284,0.0,0.0,0.1930105408062205,0.0,0.06180702152110878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659247185937007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084466201498585,0.0,0.0,0.08174648068248598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657689455512334,0.10283394948773722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254032267252268,0.2326388869993033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22978103285945475,0.1125155501879424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550301778450858,0.0,0.0,0.10043820992477316,0.0,0.08332701891882577,0.0,0.0,0.1707177279055883,0.07658066787907855,0.0,0.0,0.08674635311433031,0.0,0.0,0.10771553864865396,0.0,0.09300246908104576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062129416987432726
mentalhealth,pollenchap,2020/03/28,"Really need help, I think I'm losing my mind. Everything feels wrong, constantly. I feel like I'm always on edge. I feel like I'm going to crash all of the time and i don't know how to stop it. I'm finding it more and more difficult to discern between dreams and reality. My friends are starting to worry and i don't know how to make it stop. My family don't believe me when i tell them, or cry and try to make me feel bad for telling them. My doctor's stopped my lithium prescription because she doesn't think I'm bipolar anymore. I don't know if i am or not and i don't feel any different post stopping the drugs. I occasionally break free of this weird haze and get clarity into how weird or strange the things i do are, but then the haze comes back and it's right back to strangeness. I remember things that haven't happened and fail to remember things that have. 19y/o male living in England. I've told all this to my doctor but nothing is happening. I don't know what to do and I'm really fucking scared for myself. I don't want to be like this and i don't know how to stop. 
I need help please",1.4646238244514116,3.3922585344827634,3.1201410658307225,91.47532915360502,80.0344827586207,6.631974921630094,23.476489028213173,7.686295010490155,0.9986310344827584,868,30,194,14,22,287,114,232,0.14400000000000002,0.737,0.11900000000000001,0.0834,1,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,2,7,14,1,1,4,0,18,5,0,6,2,53,49,23,0,4,7,0,5,3,1,0,4,0,0,1,13,13,0,5,16,1,1,2,11,9,0,0,1,5,28,6,20,47,4,20,0,2,0,1,10,4,1,4,15,113,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08594283336135107,0.0,0.0,0.07023851814985158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243268203746107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588422394882683,0.0862401051338932,0.06296263184286725,0.0,0.0,0.11636877492559138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897237213238604,0.0,0.1116162616831936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345562276736272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791264923182736,0.0,0.21143668926680945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197798152577737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282745282102724,0.0,0.09736953661759387,0.0,0.2611243701519118,0.14757612088283778,0.0,0.0,0.0944021998846296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979907126712472,0.09548691740472867,0.05396305334326695,0.0,0.05870022881651485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18267222819069528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846183565322534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838184277169107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138203696916813,0.0,0.09120407475682016,0.0,0.0,0.11555143097815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13788938841692433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10429015341003332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15317160288249293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910640294812552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337781295077914,0.0,0.0,0.09892013610564293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13233624789761694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340074607473404,0.08820630294149838,0.0,0.0,0.10340803509403501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310687900063548,0.0,0.0,0.4317616551347057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805543088689444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20585734144414874,0.1323639319030917,0.0,0.0,0.060227322784527824,0.0,0.0,0.09869489662579002,0.0,0.07012490964810718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06092118933152825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489268781830932,0.0,0.0,0.11292782486682355,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwingawayaftert,2020/03/28,"I am newly in love with someone (or the thought of someone) I haven’t spoken to in 8 years My best friend and I drifted apart, not in a bad or ugly way. And when my family asked me last year if I was in a relationship I said yes and said her name (a common name) but I thought of her while saying it.. well ever since then, almost daily, I’ve been thinking of dating her and what we could do together. Hang out in the park. Cuddle on the couch, etc. and I think I’m falling in love with this fake version of her in my head. Am I crazy? Advice....",0.2131609195402291,2.123428362068968,2.421379310344829,94.91988505747128,84.34482758620689,4.901149425287357,18.287356321839077,5.985473137389443,-0.34640574712643696,414,10,96,3,12,140,77,116,0.09300000000000001,0.747,0.16,0.8034,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,6,1,7,4,1,0,1,23,17,12,0,2,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,3,9,0,0,4,0,0,3,2,2,1,0,6,3,17,5,16,10,3,23,0,0,0,3,15,10,0,4,9,66,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17837338247210566,0.0,0.0,0.1827847851368235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064777832368838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15241105980593855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19156168357850564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574121804667992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20357739300740413,0.0,0.1651154804437648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720799649497213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102790116581398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18733597961893145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487923003994659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32949416404822945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959767975341574,0.0,0.0,0.34726963446256065,0.14516102451465573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15099677938155115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.309326602805758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339251223095137,0.0,0.289828527133326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14488964930270445,0.0,0.0,0.16412299643129094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350961329536771
mentalhealth,BrainDamagedSkunk,2020/03/28,"I'm looking for some guidance? So I wrote this in my sticky notes so you can follow my thinking...

​

On the psychotics... 

I feel... 

1) like my brain is being driven by someone else

The psychotics are causing the following physical symptoms.. 

1) Weird muscle problems (like muscle spasms)  

What they’re saying…

1) Drugs may cause brain shrinkage, dementia, (probably Parkinson’s), affects the motor area of your brain in a bad way 

​

So in summation 

I might be predisposed to dementia or Alzheimers anyway because of my health decisions in the past. But now I don’t know if it’s because of the anti-psychotics or because of the predisposition. And will it be worse because I’m taking anti-psychotics? 

Anti-psychotic….being driven by someone else…’benefits’ of having someone else drive your brain… 

In 'sub-summation'  (weird play on words)...

I feel like the anti-psychotics are causing a lot of problems physically, and I want to know if anyone else feels like their brain is being controlled by someone else. Or that they can hear other people's thoughts with their medication? And please add if you feel like you were or weren't sick in the first place? I personally feel like I wasn't that/this sick in the first place...just a little dumb and 'impulsive'.",6.099224248651428,7.961403864628828,5.843442075520168,77.16060621628567,67.12227074235807,8.182995119445158,33.12124325712818,8.671277953709913,2.921823837657334,1011,45,165,16,17,314,122,229,0.07400000000000001,0.816,0.11,0.7317,0,0,1,0,0,0,53.0,0,5,3,5,5,13,1,0,13,0,18,10,4,5,0,38,38,15,0,6,8,0,5,6,0,3,6,1,0,1,6,6,0,1,10,1,0,5,3,6,0,2,7,7,20,7,22,24,2,22,0,0,1,0,11,12,1,11,10,100,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789329802667525,0.20066750350970866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05773610911181951,0.08460454743858882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894398804621478,0.2013399649916172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4608870781952858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25447189335944803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926112735276702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957570510667693,0.0,0.27591251033105096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20875386719877076,0.2949464839547848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404710293448274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776994189200216,0.0930643982359546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075858271476024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420424077871903,0.08275861687135604,0.0,0.0,0.06933949974199694,0.0,0.0,0.07019957534702895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831823822893162,0.0,0.0875956108503661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07882410808402578,0.05724487613611338,0.07209849416105453,0.17253987311642335,0.09063901961446527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902634556308853,0.1580200855639576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.279851208086481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858236965506127,0.06208370307016151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052908663113921985,0.0,0.06555277069647894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04870297575023909,0.0655416362976874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414769906648115,0.0,0.0,0.20066750350970866,0.0
mentalhealth,aitathrowawayah,2020/03/28,"Can reading about criminals make you more likely to become one I’ve read about criminals like serial killers since I was like 14, and now recently I’ve been having bad anxiety and OCD, and I’m afraid i’ll end up like one of these monsters. I have vivid thoughts that scare the shit out of me. I’ll usually get a rapid heartbeat and I’ll start getting really nervous. 

Is it possible that reading about all these people can make me turn out to be one? Have there been any cases of people doing this? I don’t find any of them cool, and I’ve never thought that I want to be like one of them. I guess I just read about them because of fascination. I’m really freaked out by this. I’m only 18",2.530610328638499,4.224488845070424,3.899647887323948,88.1805046948357,76.04225352112677,7.550234741784037,24.509389671361504,8.344100000000001,1.4390262910798133,544,18,116,10,12,179,82,142,0.171,0.703,0.126,-0.7946,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,3,0,7,12,1,3,2,1,13,1,1,2,2,18,26,5,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,6,0,4,5,2,12,6,18,19,2,10,0,0,1,0,4,4,1,1,11,68,20,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18298769531221795,0.0,0.10292501996753703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233777774373392,0.0820161586206691,0.148592163216533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916515568126848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296985645708848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14058631963487064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14821427326000253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286545472286038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17961698266891432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037678490853204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3646792512063145,0.10232600750711106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865503390385712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167700706300416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5383176015670114,0.0,0.1723833705986467,0.0,0.13284497237084147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470100535330276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810644697825505,0.11129535260618524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523022162323153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21362421274646048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146344139376083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481800966584428,0.0,0.0793569420675427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AndThenSheGrewUp,2020/03/28,"Sleep anxiety My friend has sleep anxiety. She can't really sleep because she feels insecure and scared when she sleeps. She doesn't feel safe while sleeping, so she barely slept. How can I help her?",2.6375675675675687,5.627297621621626,2.6041081081081106,89.57264864864867,86.2972972972973,7.284324324324325,20.913513513513514,8.238735603445708,1.5555232432432438,160,5,30,4,5,48,29,37,0.259,0.608,0.133,-0.5583,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,0,0,4,6,6,1,0,5,7,5,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,8,2,0,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,2,17,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27378055118539385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908149019722173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809570825696561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382502820386529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994116928109046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463494064071855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17915233585811088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8953570343306926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,it-happens-like-that,2020/03/28,"Sudden realization... I (F22) took one of those personality tests yesterday and learned learned more about myself than I realized... Didn't realize I was really an introvert, let alone that being INFJ-T really explains the issues I have with dating and why it's hard for me to be open with a guy that way 🙃

Woohoo for sudden realizations, am I right?",6.766846153846156,7.435651492307695,7.993653846153842,66.69509615384617,64.84615384615384,12.03846153846154,31.634615384615394,11.698219412168324,4.101846153846154,277,10,48,9,4,95,54,65,0.057999999999999996,0.8859999999999999,0.055999999999999994,0.2263,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,0,0,10,9,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,1,7,0,8,3,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,33,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086243857704265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950537136233255,0.0,0.0,0.26693758089316194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31102072833545397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30471162220965275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20192352124293556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601905200892139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817958612107839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544790405560162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3310742230852214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365279973490081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26888667633598323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,social-cues,2020/03/28,i tried hanging myself and i failed now i have a mark on my neck and i want to know does anyone have any ideas on how to help reduce it or make it disappear? I don't want my classmates asking what happened,0.3113636363636374,2.4855474090909127,2.055636363636367,95.99845454545458,86.27272727272728,4.42909090909091,17.89090909090909,5.6839178017228535,-0.4602309090909089,162,4,36,1,5,53,33,44,0.122,0.753,0.125,-0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,1,1.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,2,0,9,9,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,8,0,4,9,0,5,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,24,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24511680350244466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520334200944536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33696995256839435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31543022058062004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187427201072508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416005025190808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.406901591447464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980926352365132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406016457633292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447203351040244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4252027972074464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yalikejazz89,2020/03/28,"Covid19/lockdown coping This whole situation has just been destructive to my mental health and just honestly crushes my hope. Back like 2 years ago I was at my low point, I was beyond miserable and was even suicidal at some points. I pulled myself out very slowly and I got so much better in the past few months. I was graduating with a decent GPA (considering the blow it took when I was really depressed), I got a  job in the career field and specific industry I wanted. I had a positive outlook on life and excited for the future for the first time in so long and things were really on the up and up. Then this all hit. The job laid me off before my first day, everything got put on lockdown and I’m now feeling sick. I feel like I’m falling headfirst into where I was years ago and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. I can’t stay positive anymore...  I know people have it worse and my heart goes out to them and I’m trying not to be ungrateful but I needed to get this out.",3.050378787878788,4.644695691919196,4.612007575757578,84.03801136363639,74.4040404040404,8.182323232323233,25.001262626262626,8.841846274778883,1.8024838383838384,769,25,157,16,16,258,123,198,0.094,0.807,0.099,-0.0312,2,2,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,3,11,10,1,1,10,0,15,4,1,0,1,29,30,16,1,3,4,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,7,16,0,1,3,0,0,4,2,4,0,2,13,2,23,6,24,15,5,42,0,3,0,0,1,20,0,2,19,110,30,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455996025842599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373860067548324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065221594964538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117880088826206,0.0,0.0,0.12251983919567948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893413462015803,0.0,0.11931696343623023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914987380923738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245031644845491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009136056174715,0.09896691923504793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23566961757992602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723769822644899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323888464764225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725248855352074,0.0,0.16416047452387414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375930205018229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749422425156846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613328022242202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784888340439374,0.13535897033331853,0.0,0.0,0.1225960032472702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13960715205245744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057450817483076,0.0,0.10183657974457372,0.10271933942219104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292469428750106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322439758210909,0.0960402876687886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619140577993731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139262403207993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774936308015646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15571519129086805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765612882679918,0.0,0.1158185229341566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15153095798550592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203416181772453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077882185955601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15391357500274372,0.09405378360661792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430298178100355,0.08170945798288126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15466545368123144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14117541639527076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17841946641802864
mentalhealth,ImpressiveGuide3,2020/03/28,"New Project for Mental Health (Please Help!!) Hi guys! I'm new to reddit and I just discovered this amazing community full of so many kind souls. Seriously though, you guys are awesome. During times like this I really think it takes courage to not only help your friends and family but also others that are affected by the virus. I am a highschool student from the Midwest and it has been 2 weeks since I have been in quarantine. During my time at home, I've been through a lot of emotions: anger, boredom, happiness, sadness, loneliness...you name them. I'm sure that there are others out there who are going through the same thing. The coronavirus affects us physically but also mentally. I wanted to share to you guys a project that I was thinking about creating. As of right now, I do not have a final plan because I just came up with the idea today. I was thinking about creating a page/site that would offer those who are affected by quarantine  (such as emotional support, talks, starting a gofundme, etc.). I'm so sorry this is so disorganized but I would love to have some of you guys helping me out with starting this project. Please be sure to share any ideas with me and I hope you guys all stay safe. Keep doing what you guys are doing and never lose hope! We are all in this together (sorry a highschool musical reference but still!) :)",4.419285714285714,6.5129614047619055,4.776507936507937,82.19071428571431,71.85714285714286,8.133333333333335,29.46031746031746,8.841846274778883,2.4911222222222222,1062,44,194,21,21,335,146,252,0.084,0.67,0.24600000000000002,0.9934,0,2,0,0,0,0,41.0,2,6,1,2,15,19,1,0,12,0,24,2,0,3,5,45,41,17,0,5,8,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,6,18,12,0,2,6,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,6,0,23,15,29,32,7,23,1,2,0,1,28,8,0,4,13,138,41,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498862895342886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372881252492417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05712725533629993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718398306433573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21083153401822946,0.0,0.0,0.10451601163137136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834532829269963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265923345028133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240329361157516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053259891808035406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5567502517591313,0.0,0.099760419168671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961372311801832,0.0,0.0,0.18844378978872087,0.0,0.09400289940513047,0.1861585251546867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21158366025436592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083297412270934,0.0,0.09758883077532124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04578398343136477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484212474532104,0.0,0.07967239023840135,0.08458064860099973,0.0,0.0,0.0950114046878385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888835744163873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0722781036089858,0.181019354549575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127380819478797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20573991525877294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0600356624446877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003134308275972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752128523213694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098105609163923,0.13266266740348814,0.0998867786759692,0.0748402141528982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063456683593115,0.176648890679228,0.0,0.07046135242270077,0.07532385667340423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06225949457810032,0.18014466471197435,0.09207364323106294,0.0,0.10929090942450012,0.0,0.08883002433505724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272654292336905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527501371001771,0.0,0.07517181116696797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314363854057093,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway1a3c1a2b,2020/03/28,"What the hell are we supposed to do now? Everyone is quarantined, I can't get therapy in person, I can't talk on the phone because of my home situation... I was already looking for a new therapist then the coronavirus happened, being at home is not private and it's bad for my mental state. What are people like me supposed to do? What are people who have it worse than me supposed to do, like domestic violence victims? How are we going to get professional help?",4.296356340288924,6.052167977528093,5.8090208667736745,76.0603370786517,71.47191011235954,9.130658105939006,32.939004815409305,9.606745405546679,3.4425139646869978,366,18,65,9,7,124,61,89,0.185,0.738,0.077,-0.9163,0,1,0,0,1,0,12.0,2,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,4,0,14,0,0,1,0,5,19,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,1,9,2,11,17,0,8,1,0,1,0,7,3,1,0,5,49,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365254242621677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17896184813509164,0.13065741212345178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048075089221061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22396372876238912,0.0,0.1218122521841367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895368721385869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366509622296367,0.0,0.4299935467255381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094277681162816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799885004370846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160005664598329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070073231286184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29718759009751583,0.18715017985571605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409229687071514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722753898497064,0.0,0.0,0.2451122255888601,0.24886095101431094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184269893287641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,average__girl,2020/03/28,"Lack of touch as a child? I found a journal from when I was really little, and inside I had written “I just wish my mom would cuddle with me”. The thing is I don’t remember writing that ever. Do you think I genuinely was deprived from touch and it somehow may have affected how I am today? Or maybe I wrote that because I was a bored child or something. I do tend to feel lonely and depressed, however I’m also a fairly independent person. Has anyone else dealt with lack of touch as a child as well?",3.1162623762376214,4.618240564356436,4.755532178217823,83.45428836633664,74.04950495049505,7.426237623762375,25.496287128712872,8.07648339933343,1.5618405940594062,391,13,77,6,8,132,69,101,0.182,0.769,0.049,-0.8988,1,2,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,6,0,13,1,0,3,1,24,21,11,0,4,3,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,7,4,13,1,10,12,2,4,0,3,0,1,8,1,0,4,3,60,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934684713467024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16916057852652966,0.2478822077007101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14747610066921193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083708717783033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20209848129839106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21883629820618608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223252674564635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652598333569033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424738300411048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24304760686309815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833413001650295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112408191475937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15498426007541227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740554740837995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18624677822448374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16072516412634072,0.1550166819188043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293179592502009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21752090653767087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782034445424993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17185758816245433,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PMmagic,2020/03/28,"[Advice needed] I just got hit by bf It's been an hour since I got hit by my bf. In the face with a fist. We were living together but he took his things and left. I also called the police on him. 

This is the first time this ever happened to me and I just wanted to ask if there is anything I need to do besides the legal actions (that I totally will). Is there anything that I can do now to diminish the long term effects of this event? I dont want to wake up with anxiety attacks 3 times a day.",1.241547248182762,2.5922601121495354,3.3831152647975067,91.98273104880579,78.7196261682243,6.250882658359295,22.16926272066459,6.937597516519254,0.4802053997923154,380,11,88,4,9,130,75,107,0.073,0.909,0.018000000000000002,-0.6687,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,2,7,1,1,0,8,0,10,2,2,1,2,16,21,5,0,5,4,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,5,0,13,0,13,13,2,16,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,10,64,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19240149390259392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745520618014106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15062255367311028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3240522125087888,0.0,0.18406831235468,0.2239941339606908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20104969700463002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12697965226768768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307570493287053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17810092886921006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167477026945832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3149465276543847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17411176907108208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938998764606244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21392474616896426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17386006575475754,0.17424404851279626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919872277627643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16287186756709088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080691484091433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296197034501026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187552915201021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322651046299989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Just-Wasabi,2020/03/28,"Jealousy Alright, this is something that has been eating me up for weeks and weeks now and I figure I might as well try and vent this somewhere so I made a little burner just to get it out into the open.  

​

I'm feeling myself getting consumed by jealousy.  I can't appreciate anything I used to anymore, favorite artists, seeing someone play an instrument, anything that shows achievement from hard work makes me bilious.  This isn't like me.  

It's something that has just happened out of nowhere and I've been trying to address it.  I've tried learning an instrument, I'm trying to learn to draw.  I've tried picking up coding for fun little projects.  I lack the aptitude to stick to it and looking up any guides just exacerbates these feelings.  I try and engage with people by offering positive comments and feedback, thinking maybe making a positive interaction and channel will help me but no help.  

I've tried internet detox, this quarantine thing has been a great way to just unplug from everything, and after a week I'm still burning up like this.  

I don't like it, and I don't think it's going to go away and I don't know where it's going to lead me.  Nothing severe like self harm but I don't want to become a bitter and morose person.  I just want to enjoy the things I used to but I can't, and I know it's irrational but here I am still.

​

I've tried to talk to friends about it, but they seem to not know how to approach it and I don't blame them really.  It's a weird thing to have someone try and explain just how they feel envious of people they don't even know, because who in the world says that?  But it's the only way I can phrase it.  

​

So I don't know if anything can actually be done about it, but again as said I'm just trying to get it out there and maybe that will help.",3.7159065934065936,5.200353832417584,4.48934065934066,86.03065934065937,72.48901098901098,6.958241758241758,28.10989010989011,7.447530270364453,1.5486000000000004,1441,55,285,16,28,463,170,364,0.10800000000000001,0.769,0.12300000000000001,0.818,0,1,2,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,4,3,22,16,2,0,13,1,26,2,0,9,0,66,59,30,0,4,16,0,4,4,1,3,1,2,1,2,30,22,1,0,15,4,0,5,12,4,1,0,6,9,29,12,43,49,1,30,0,0,2,0,18,15,0,3,12,188,59,7,0.0,0.0,0.07384800727955199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24598190411713605,0.2758606855715681,0.051461681089048826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504939106006613,0.0,0.0,0.18682254372449514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109927250025172,0.0,0.0,0.04613085477560965,0.08357723182134139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744192834009865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077434546813398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04998270740084375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680119242150402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479085335485388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058466415079967485,0.0,0.11861139079633624,0.0,0.12902375511816225,0.0,0.0,0.08343209421757618,0.0,0.0,0.06691926451893247,0.0,0.0677900493112442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15217032656188587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20794535248027265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14788417740623785,0.15169271481622815,0.0,0.0,0.0635480470644695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160563452355354,0.10102746924609968,0.0,0.15205167216767532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027935046650668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261232492858312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057554343820351586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492720877517807,0.06607660160906897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04847942386326428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198437481277062,0.0601798980382508,0.0,0.0,0.060303278197262625,0.06889179308478115,0.0789456611609065,0.08549135297362395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12823857836226274,0.11651681919594582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086850769002773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06082480022686665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15082557454638731,0.09697913097706597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5137844350602776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071802426358134,0.0,0.0,0.08927030067052448,0.12013478619330548,0.182106065681724,0.0,0.0680410270180347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05509239344091376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758606855715681,0.0
mentalhealth,xylwah,2020/03/28,"Quarantine has brought me back to a dark place. Alone 20 hours of the day. Not eating until living partner gets home for dinner. Exercising on lunch instead of making a meal. 

I’m scared.",1.9865714285714304,4.835811657142859,2.9857142857142875,86.12428571428573,89.57142857142857,5.085714285714286,21.285714285714285,6.742157984588678,0.8248285714285717,148,5,26,2,5,47,33,35,0.14,0.86,0.0,-0.5994,0,2,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,1,5,0,1,0,2,5,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,14,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3512340216076488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607682681746055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21870931114712847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34701230039417885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17718022625558474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3401727338541543,0.0,0.3339724723990909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994559721825102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263703731008689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35431626681888545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3395259889772826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CheesePsycho,2020/03/28,"The fuck is wrong with me? (Pardon my french) Here’s the jist chaps. My partner is in immense pain and on the ground crying. I love them. But inside my brain, while they are on the ground in immense pain and distressed, my brain goes “fuck you”. Not a sliver of empathy. And I swear, I’m not just some asshole. And I always do this. Just void of empathy or compassion. Surely that isn’t normal. If anyone has a idea of why this might be, I’d appreciate it. Thanks chiefs.",0.3238952536824904,2.7510196382978727,1.791702127659576,95.09576923076924,91.97872340425532,4.594435351882161,16.805237315875615,6.297961479604792,-0.2794196399345332,362,9,77,4,13,116,65,94,0.213,0.6459999999999999,0.141,-0.7964,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,2,0,3,9,2,1,6,0,8,7,2,0,1,17,13,8,0,2,7,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,11,3,8,11,1,7,0,0,0,3,5,6,2,4,1,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726019089207153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14504284708102785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4631304397380365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22785677759888465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835392336139231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23416801344529375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872175047449288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22005495321710086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032415174862715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4414493234304409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19550432088158445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19097758298220407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871771416384611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267967831631139,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BodomBlueMoonX,2020/03/28,"Don’t plan to stick around much longer. So, I’m just gonna cut to the chase. I’m not gonna be around much longer. I hate life so much you have no idea. I mean I absolutely hate life, I hate it, I loath it, it’s a sickness and it’s absolutely awful. I have no respect for it what so ever. Life is overrated and not for everyone. It’s obviously not for me. I’m gonna die soon, gonna kill my self, can’t stand living my shitty life anymore. Maybe I’ll get lucky and catch the coronavirus and die from that, I can only hope right. But if not I’m killing myself. I’m 22, no it’s not that young, in fact if anyone leaves a comment that says “oh your so young” or anything like that I’m automatically ignoring it. I live on my own, don’t go to school because I’m dumb as shit, can’t work because of the virus, even if I could I probably wouldn’t since I struggle to keep jobs. I’ve legitimately never had a single friend in my life, ever, not one. You know how it feels to have a best friend? I don’t. I’m sure it’s amazing and a wonderful experience that I’ll never have because everyone hates me to death. Also I’ve never been in a relationship, because as I said everyone hates the shit out of me and wants nothing to do with me. I’m literally so unbelievably lonely, I just start crying because I can’t stand it. Sometimes I don’t talk to another person unless I get a phone call or my grandma comes over.  I have high functioning autism, so that limits my social abilities, basically I have no social skills because of that, I don’t know how to start or keep conversations, I’m bad at talking. I’m also an idiot since thoughts come slow. I make stupid decisions that I always regret. I don’t eat much anymore because I’m too scared of gaining weight, I used to be 300 pounds once, I’m 175 now, I’m 6’2 for reference. Maybe I’m too nice to people, I’ve always been very nice and always avoid saying anything mean to anyone and starting fights. Maybe I should change it, maybe I should start being an asshole and treating everyone outside my family like shit. That’s how I’m treated, so I’ll return the favor. People always abandon me. People treat me like shit, like I don’t matter. It’s like they forget I have feelings. How in the fuck do people forget that? It’s like I’m naturally hated. I’m legitimately beginning to hate everyone outside my family. People have me, so I hate them twice as much. I literally have zero talents, like there is legitimately not a single thing I’m good at, like I fail hard at anything I try. But above all, I miss my mom more than anything. She died New Year’s Eve of 2018, about a year and a half ago. I loved my mom, we were always close, I loved her more than anything. She loved me more than anything too, and my brother, there wasn’t anything she would wouldn’t do for me and my brother, we were everything to her. She raised us by herself after my dad walked out on us when I was 5. She was such a good person, she was beautiful, I loved her so much. And then she died. She died of breast cancer. She battled it for 6 years. That’s not fair. Why did she have to die? I loved her so much, she was such a good person and didn’t deserve any of the bad stuff she had to deal with. Why couldn’t it have been me? I don’t benefit the world and things are terrible for me. I lived with my mom my whole life until she died, then I was living with my grandparents until last October when I finally got my own apartment. The problem though is now I’m alone most of the day. I know I have a family that loves and cares about me and would be sad if I were to kill myself, but I legitimately don’t see why I should keep going if things are just gonna continue to be shit and everyone hates me to death. And don’t give me that “it gets better” shit because it doesn’t, not for everyone, maybe for some people it does but not for everyone. You can just generalize all people, we’re all different, what works for one person may not work for some one else. And as far as relationships go don’t you dare give me that “there’s someone out there for everyone” shit because obviously that’s a lie too, and I could go on a 20 minute rant about how it’s a lie. So if I turn up dead soon, this is why. You can try and lie to me and tell me life gets better but I know you’re lying. But if you truly think you’re able to convince me, best of luck to you! I’m just not willing to keep going, the fact that my depression is causing me physical health problems now is a sign that it’s time to stop.

TL;DR I’m gonna kill my self soon because life is becoming too unbearable.",2.1706857366771146,3.721541015673981,3.920934038662488,88.25795278213167,76.6698014629049,7.083850574712644,22.82979362591432,7.865858978985527,0.9473139080459778,3580,104,790,55,80,1204,330,957,0.18,0.722,0.098,-0.9972,3,5,0,0,1,3,111.0,4,8,2,12,51,82,27,3,30,1,75,28,8,8,13,141,162,70,14,22,34,6,4,8,2,15,11,3,0,6,45,37,2,9,14,0,0,9,39,43,0,6,19,8,122,39,84,120,23,73,0,7,1,8,70,23,9,18,47,491,167,6,0.03597910533544992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03189330602488245,0.0,0.0,0.03726350239708874,0.0,0.05754495507573314,0.14968748932564646,0.0,0.0,0.024467025404199098,0.037727229020203666,0.0,0.0,0.0713632092375259,0.0503148540128272,0.0,0.2072541665083645,0.0640580635236927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008210021373365,0.2193252866650809,0.039736095108260164,0.0,0.0,0.0755157026303078,0.0636411897164466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03673868925262752,0.0,0.03668309577116291,0.036960452080202134,0.038061122785787466,0.061985626877566626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057452775927820464,0.0,0.0395213577623599,0.023203546464244832,0.03709287776363512,0.030988750704723518,0.0,0.2613844167902558,0.037590507313331266,0.0,0.0,0.03148555753796448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03681560695165917,0.030055925769808974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02376385974704073,0.06509032123713711,0.0,0.30941619298837675,0.03233569992939788,0.03519446886710213,0.10175369535566424,0.0,0.03638423341752016,0.0,0.0,0.03941335125021032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05559473506427786,0.033262103123043965,0.0751903902198514,0.06902887257872957,0.10223877350472006,0.09053269961485433,0.028775777290582127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03223021136406444,0.3196972596741485,0.0,0.03824410651276778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03801390017686004,0.0,0.03573536979358126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04061603053196984,0.0,0.0,0.03570371037840659,0.12791952784872093,0.15922219722292813,0.0,0.07909270142988258,0.029327772915612067,0.0,0.03809667757754175,0.0,0.0,0.20330484901586715,0.14062058793673912,0.0,0.12708083671587586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19483528369981284,0.0,0.024016332193744425,0.0,0.1807292361495136,0.0783835866929253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12641487997192222,0.0,0.0,0.1851414756133186,0.0,0.08324791222855889,0.03474884413297363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03452292193120113,0.0,0.0,0.0383165729512838,0.07314111876559698,0.027363730888189285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17460367013430236,0.12566226800051206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03879156085515738,0.06885428944342686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725618865196714,0.0,0.03072595936998257,0.03422436830623175,0.05722405731659354,0.036021361046458984,0.03641277543223514,0.02867068872188258,0.0,0.07506810723236304,0.0,0.25852424215241954,0.059524575462599726,0.0,0.0,0.07335233386783276,0.030484979194116843,0.0,0.03558425516010123,0.0,0.10186478375948127,0.0,0.0,0.030080143098127756,0.0,0.03761317279789779,0.041187467683556085,0.0,0.0,0.033909880983439875,0.0,0.0,0.05783728400869417,0.03144732390644411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170875661142516,0.023053957926356592,0.03534928831618399,0.028563390731282112,0.020979705657401537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04885490158453835,0.03913493494478918,0.0,0.0,0.08655686745629951,0.031074395091266863,0.0,0.02968652993847917,0.021221408513324037,0.0,0.0,0.04381285747116684,0.0,0.0,0.1298621854935904,0.040169386219104014,0.0,0.0,0.03901780497041636,0.07857965157985182,0.0,0.0,0.051117048278682464,0.0,0.0,0.06950809264417489
mentalhealth,1877cars4kids,2020/03/28,"I opened up to my therapist, and he treated me like I could only be lying or that I needed to be hospitalized I’ve been going to this therapist for nearly a 5 months now. Therapy for me is usually just having someone to talk about things that happen in my life, but I usually hold back on how those things actually make me feel. I guess I kinda just need someone to talk to every once In a while even though I’m primarily introverted and refuse to go outside for recreational purposes unless it’s night time where I know nobody is there. 

But recently, I guess I kinda got more comfortable with my therapist and I ended up sharing with him a lot of the parts of my life I don’t like to talk about in person, the fact that I struggle with my weight so much I often end up forcefully inducing vomit(though thankfully I’ve been able to tone this down recently), the fact that I never feel comfortable in my own skin when I’m public and I feel like everyone is making fun of or laughing at me even though I know they could care less about me being there, the fact that every time I speak I hate everything I say down to my own voice, the fact that I despise myself so much I actively avoid looking in the mirror and cringe every time I hear me own name, 

the fact that I can’t stand the idea of being around people sometimes and that I can’t eat with my family or my girlfriend because if I eat anywhere but alone I become self conscious and end up forcing myself to throw up, the fact that I can’t talk to anyone about my weight or self esteem issues especially my friends since I’m a guy and everytime I talk about this people look at me at first like I’m a joke and then with disgust. The fact that my only parent thinks I’m a joke, the fact that my girlfriend looks at me like a pathetic creature that she’s nursing back to health instead of like a man, and that she openly admits she’s not attracted to me in any way shape or form because of my hate for going outside and my lack of capabilities but I can’t leave her because then I really will be alone, the fact that all of these problems are so first world and easy to deal with but I as always am incapable of doing it.

He initially said things like “where did this come from” and “you never mentioned this before” and at first I thought he was genuinely asking but then when he kept dismissing the actual problems and instead just questioned me on their origin, indirectly refusing to talk to me about the actual issues I realized he thought I was lying. And then after that he spoke to me as if I were a child just like my girlfriend does whenever I try to go to her with any of my problems, which really hurt because we had genuinely complex and interesting conversation before and after I actually told him everything he thinks I’m an idiot just like everyone else. He then said “if this is true, I’m going to have to send you to the hospital” and then I realized that he wanted my to be lying because I was quickly becoming too much to deal with. He essentially strong armed me into saying that I’m laying even though I wasn’t. And then on the drive home I realized, a therapist is not someone your supposed to talk to with real problems. They are just people who need money at the end of the day, and they won’t risk their license on you becoming an actual problem. They’re not your friend obviously, they’re just paid workers who do not really care about your safety, when they see you they see a walking atm not a human being with problems. I’m such a dumbass for not realizing that in the first place, he should’ve spoken to me like a child because that’s what I was for not immediately realizing this. You guys are probably gonna annihilate me in the comments

I’m done with therapy, shit sucks.",9.116390374331553,6.476416300802139,9.270100267379682,70.2339739304813,61.79411764705882,12.718983957219253,37.27874331550802,11.144777236671896,3.9351716577540112,2995,104,579,63,32,998,291,748,0.14,0.737,0.122,-0.9366,1,3,0,0,0,0,37.0,1,8,7,6,41,44,7,3,36,0,40,10,3,5,14,132,96,56,0,16,29,1,6,10,5,3,3,8,1,9,37,38,4,5,20,2,3,10,16,17,0,4,20,19,100,27,97,64,13,85,0,1,5,0,80,35,2,16,48,412,137,1,0.05054345069995808,0.0,0.2466155845137107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046955436359503,0.0,0.0,0.0420561999337814,0.0,0.0,0.06874255936949605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03534115592317464,0.0,0.0,0.04499438695678809,0.04725130354014692,0.0,0.0,0.07772958745449465,0.0,0.18486491051607576,0.16746381090257406,0.08601750768923543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306483306602922,0.0,0.0,0.04353870735503528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070966525180327,0.0,0.0,0.03259634434612268,0.1042161566323683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04423091431383702,0.05172349837732328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034371365047146,0.04222256746587729,0.0,0.17906598091675913,0.0,0.0,0.1001504175020575,0.0,0.12775511140760515,0.09659286627160976,0.09085038885721487,0.0,0.04764786706800285,0.0,0.07666886200400852,0.03610825127910903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17196893338100233,0.0,0.0,0.07809948926467437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436250390353232,0.0,0.04042421475684878,0.0,0.1113586185300422,0.10009192524591527,0.04469540653166363,0.0,0.0,0.09980238704657952,0.0,0.053725324575746636,0.056966142324959314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05069920211313115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05410780933881691,0.057057403670288866,0.0,0.10550846186001488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05555471735853523,0.0,0.0,0.05351821639309813,0.0,0.0,0.07140066795359773,0.24692976963690585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733130668387094,0.0,0.0,0.04297023433420299,0.0,0.0,0.06747629163709766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040343300136059364,0.0,0.11146575560532992,0.11243198478084164,0.0779644501694127,0.0,0.0,0.047431604574660564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05382712543567315,0.0,0.07688114366487041,0.0,0.0,0.05612252058818396,0.05473363168474004,0.0,0.10512139410421617,0.04413259159942766,0.052807148356347915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054494388489567294,0.290179537666453,0.0,0.0,0.056620232196051334,0.0,0.0,0.057529512266124586,0.09713828627224716,0.0,0.0998111199177652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615679189881676,0.08038836132434511,0.0,0.0,0.08055317265048917,0.0,0.10545568439412288,0.0,0.051882125814603684,0.041810064720613216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847590527513247,0.0,0.04998876513494648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0528389888312874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843743778451915,0.0,0.04653361867775927,0.11560168156161728,0.2347393675950948,0.1007364683127282,0.06477240470688549,0.1986347347583714,0.08025170819507503,0.08841687768842735,0.0,0.0,0.04829643313580488,0.0,0.03431568526603192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113329404421494,0.0,0.029811836758487625,0.040119038561647474,0.0,0.12309661293530436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,catnipinthewindow,2020/03/28,"anonymity seemed better I´m a first time user. I thought writing this could help me. I feel I can´t talk to my friends or family about my thoughts because I feel I will smother them by admitting how I really feel. I´m a very talkative person, but I don´t share what I really should tell. I become a quite person when the topic s mental health.

All these years I was keeping my situation a secret. I was until I reached a breakthrough point last year. I was always collapsing emotionally. I was always joyless. My mind was my enemy. Thoughts didn´t let me enjoy the day or sleep at night. I decided I needed help. I collected the will to talk to my parents. I did, but I lost a semester on the university anyways. I didn´t care about that, for I was receiving help. 

I went to a psychiatrist and was diagnosed with OCD and depression. I don´t like to use those terms. I feel they don´t really express the feelings. I would rather just say I suffer most of the time internally.

I went on ssris and after 8 months I can only say I feel exactly the same, even worse. At some point, I think the ssris had a paradoxical effect on me. It worsened the depression so much more. 

I was optimistic when I first started treatment, but I now think it is pretty much useless. Before medication, I had tried so many things to feel better. Exercising, reading, writing, drawing, playing music. They all failed. Now that I have experienced no improvement with medication, it seems my last resort failed. 

It makes me feel the cause is lost. Everyday I experience either a complete state of anxiety which paralyzes mee or a complete state of depression that makes me feel so distant to the world. Apathy and ancxiety rule my life.

I am so tired and I would just like to hear from one person that treatment actually works. That I will one day feel better. I am surrounded with people with mental health issues in my family and in my circle of friends and I have found no one that can actually tell me there is a better tomorrow.

I believe that life is wonderful and that it has so many things to offer. I know because it seems correc to me that the universe is a beatiful thing. i believe that but I just don´t feel that way. My believes and feelings don´t share the same bed. I think that is what I loath the most. That I am carrying feelings that I don´t agree with.

I hate myself for writing the following thing, but it is how I really think. No one seems to understand just how bad I feel. And that is my fault, because I don´t share. But I don´t share because I feel bad. And when I do share, I still feel horrible. I have practiced sharing and it just doesn´t do the trick.

As I said, I don´t like admitting how I feel. So I act like I am fine and I feel happy all the time and that is the most tiring thing. It is a full time job. No rest. I have a girfriend and I have to act like I am having a good time. I have friends and I have to joke and smile. I have a family and I can´t smother them with my problems",2.3733590623213274,4.804708512864497,3.885606346483705,84.51117681532305,79.65180102915951,7.248587764436821,24.467953116066326,8.291686609442984,1.7371395311606634,2345,86,455,49,60,775,231,583,0.17300000000000001,0.6509999999999999,0.17600000000000002,-0.5761,2,0,0,0,0,0,67.0,0,0,4,13,27,42,4,0,34,0,48,11,1,9,4,107,98,42,0,7,16,1,18,5,3,6,10,4,1,3,36,24,0,1,38,4,0,6,4,17,0,6,20,23,96,25,39,70,16,48,0,9,0,0,37,12,0,12,32,330,132,5,0.0,0.0,0.10914979815135248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306844380570678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042782602335456985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933903626926666,0.13636585935884427,0.06176495696637538,0.0475882009863436,0.1890255481402088,0.0,0.19784507427898415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05701943851116649,0.057450555369667235,0.0,0.0,0.11727295443333488,0.0,0.0,0.044651697947579366,0.0,0.0,0.07213421675817629,0.0,0.14450480213299358,0.056762870811234226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290828945634366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03693804765244374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05470554791829872,0.1581638205185847,0.0,0.5089940379517774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513984286441274,0.0,0.061319062826037836,0.12962294392970025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046907379638308384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05953338388939769,0.0,0.055214527615101344,0.0,0.11889168206100585,0.06303173163702518,0.0,0.11245638874167872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837134815500705,0.055497102295887085,0.049708861119904635,0.0,0.0,0.030735011120629523,0.09117295633187958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057187275851572565,0.07900320361316883,0.13661106701029374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12209785984837028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466097110928467,0.11339869010751595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11267745124392753,0.11271883618612308,0.0,0.05646847970045585,0.0,0.044638937511727865,0.0,0.08222287025574783,0.04146780527807823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05248198401094094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515853714604368,0.042533612226963724,0.0,0.0,0.062098283508973035,0.0,0.0,0.038771471568084914,0.14649510515947733,0.0,0.0,0.10573472541305463,0.0,0.0,0.056896003829471915,0.0,0.053512835280328866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948330275991096,0.055940304615151835,0.0,0.14330838499509094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05319764385193362,0.0889478804590961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20364869917270487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06286223478081908,0.05596555895905833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03958412350378139,0.0,0.04466191337865223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990106723160196,0.09776212798450963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18577099125912275,0.14333836431049252,0.0,0.13319501535252773,0.16305208319617456,0.12855551306017607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037969519724375816,0.0,0.0,0.058220074766106224,0.0,0.04830139122475744,0.0,0.04614412259522759,0.0,0.044390797216494415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368638663158228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06064846176642121,0.04071419016756381,0.0,0.05699252652968265,0.07945527306040298,0.0,0.0,0.07202795240759749
mentalhealth,journeytobatman,2020/03/28,"Cherish what a gift life is My wife and I lost our little baby today. Even in his short life (<4 months) he showed us a zeal for life that I’ve never seen from anyone. I have never met anyone that wanted to experience all that life had to offer. Curiosity and love drove his little life, and I’ve never met anyone who touched as many lives in as short a time (his family and his care team will forever be better humans because his little life touched us).

I know life can seem difficult sometimes especially these days with the pandemic chaos. But all I can is - life is precious. My little one worked so hard to have a chance at it. While he didn’t succeed; you have that chance. Please make the most of it and cherish it.",5.2556332556332555,5.7331099790209805,5.624848484848485,83.03505050505049,68.0909090909091,8.313597513597513,25.67909867909868,8.167268648758528,1.3917620823620824,569,14,114,7,9,182,88,143,0.065,0.736,0.19899999999999998,0.9649,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,3,1,0,5,2,9,0,0,6,0,12,9,0,1,5,17,23,10,0,1,1,1,3,0,0,1,8,0,0,1,10,6,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,2,0,1,7,4,15,7,12,14,3,18,0,1,1,1,19,9,0,2,8,71,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23449272962449336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681444690040013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988667368444532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397454989155208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209352723793247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383442322455537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934937914791604,0.10538306890554903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013941724123952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061435348187435776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.631669115439513,0.0,0.4481607615210577,0.09871018830368072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220289868008306,0.0,0.10089235607415516,0.0,0.07461885629565113,0.11333472409382485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922751509627626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25865165210838603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574993253819734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270882957445943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176691243488667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056044698078396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518404346449155,0.0,0.10596124046727316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689325914556454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593501536673009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138244815648939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ConcernedFriend58,2020/03/28,I need advice on convincing a friend to get help. So I have a friend who I play video games with and I’ve known him for over ten years. He’s been going through some tough things the last couple years and recently he has displayed some erratic behavior and even some paranoia. I talked to another guy we play with who knows his family and he gave them a call and they told him that he was in the psych ward for a period and they’ve tried getting him some help but he just isn’t doing it. My friend loves to play video games and I’m pretty sure that outside of his family the people he plays games with are about as close to him as anyone. What can I or other people who are friends with him do to convince him to get help. I’m not good at talking with people but I desperately want to help my friend before things possibly get out of hand. Please tell me how I should approach talking to him to not only convince him to get help but also to do it in a way that shows I’m not judging him and all I want is to help him.,2.9089953271028044,4.022766196261685,3.852418224299068,91.26498247663551,73.95327102803739,7.219158878504674,22.2535046728972,7.645422480735847,0.6513,802,19,181,10,16,258,112,214,0.037000000000000005,0.667,0.29600000000000004,0.9959,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,2,0,6,16,0,0,8,0,13,2,1,1,2,37,29,17,0,4,8,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,12,16,0,0,2,10,0,2,4,1,0,1,4,1,26,15,31,24,5,15,0,0,0,1,47,7,0,5,5,116,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201777890033353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167175428233862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020241440598825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015387148613341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754401174466644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705283597457587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12683893749458602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571383829090322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21613107516116584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4428248215240496,0.0,0.29945435562317874,0.0,0.06514842324938917,0.09614849680204814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350442711043188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4610154230175244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629991515456422,0.09344097632294356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346051609767708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499871819552877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871833581563768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384157080710348,0.0,0.0,0.12583231605954726,0.0,0.1292311813293626,0.0,0.11662269955023599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318599335243468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080399931902334,0.0,0.0,0.2764123430642176,0.1001940603201324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15231378684307348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095364878053542,0.0,0.07782810026789437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352267106090036,0.09099012686534284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476394419197983
mentalhealth,yummycircle,2020/03/28,"Am i relapsing? I used to have anorexia like many years ago... I wouldnt eat unless im forced too, skipped lunch and dinner and ate like a loaf of break for breakfast... Weirdly, i wouldnt dare to look at my weight but i did count the calories. This went on for like a few years until two years ago where i suddenly changed. I told myself i didnt have energy to do this anymore and started eating (borderline binging). But it was kind of strange because even though i was eating more, I was losing more weight than i was when i starved myself. (I think it could have been anxiety though bcs sometimes i would get so anxious i would puke out food frequently) Either that or I just started noticing that my body was quite thin. Ok but anyways, at the start of this year i started gaining weight again... And so i kind of thought to myself whats the harm in starving myself for a few more days. I told myself i wouldnt go back to my past habits and yea compared to a fewbyears ago, skipping lunch and dinner for justa  few days didnt seem too bad? But this kind fo went on for two weeks and now im just not hungry anymore. Whenever i eat food i feel like puking. I just hate food right now. Am i relapsing? I dont have any messed up body image issues like last time but i have been depressed these few months. I dont know maybe i just lost my appetite or smthg but right now i cant stand the sight of food. I try to eat but like i just cant bcs ew",1.8853641561024117,3.7356244093959763,2.731894108873973,95.1344208302262,78.39597315436242,5.48864031817052,22.4464330101914,6.238725200709706,0.22636574695500844,1126,34,250,8,27,354,145,298,0.171,0.733,0.096,-0.9777,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,4,20,18,1,0,8,2,28,20,2,1,0,37,48,23,0,6,17,0,5,6,0,5,0,0,0,0,10,8,18,0,5,0,0,3,10,8,0,2,17,7,40,10,27,25,8,43,0,3,2,0,2,11,0,3,33,160,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046233668046299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052325767147873715,0.0,0.0588633090254785,0.08692682660548527,0.15261907027108038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059166553165155886,0.06424651001914368,0.046905431657859264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17093882479541528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139842973857972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06143494204003554,0.0,0.0,0.09924732158773733,0.0,0.06627328523967536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18035975586925765,0.0,0.0,0.3936736985668768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05082196021445973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038906096965352896,0.05497007867839073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721725573607525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040200992819977965,0.0,0.043730058456342216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759680249513464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662292868937064,0.08031140036178619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24038155897156915,0.042287386898757,0.06272107831647825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22555092064783944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461507364370113,0.08608264283233677,0.08399540541328568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801094106600336,0.0773023755143486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06141738533619276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876032774504671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345345103007084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184130560264892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142254678108994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07004854577362161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07610134124920734,0.0,0.21785046884581036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049303747160224114,0.15119767104653836,0.06108635225033503,0.044867701525814326,0.0,0.0,0.14704997530006886,0.0,0.052241131933964256,0.0,0.15032968752886394,0.0,0.0,0.06645644637813647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06172126125319451,0.2810976823188898,0.0,0.14265901288972813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093201450249817,0.0,0.0,0.19820223126198394
mentalhealth,just-browsing-ok,2020/03/28,"I need help Right now with all the corona stuff going on I don’t know how to get help or what to do. I get a lot of anxiety talking to people on the phone and setting up appointments. I also have a lot of trust issues that make it hard for me to open up to people. I have been struggling for years now with school and it has only gotten worse. During classes, homework, and now when I go to clean my room, I have a hard time concentrating and would just sit there thinking about doing the thing I was supposed to be doing, not actually doing it even though I wanted/needed to do it. Now with the online classes, when I don’t do the work my teachers send me messages about it and this has been causing me to have panic attacks (hyperventilating, panic, crying, extreme anger) which then leads to me hurting myself (scratching, hitting myself and other things, cutting). I’ve had self harm problems in the past but now it’s starting to become a daily thing and I’m worried. I feel like everyday I’ve been having massive mood swings going happy to hating myself. I have no motivation to do things like clean my room or work, especially in classes that I hate. I don’t know how to get out of this.
Thank you for listening to me",4.4497958191541045,5.542967090909091,5.418789499270783,81.56716820612544,70.2396694214876,7.181720952843947,27.04521147301896,7.285733465282438,1.4134469615945546,964,31,183,9,17,317,131,242,0.14400000000000002,0.74,0.11599999999999999,-0.3264,0,0,0,0,0,1,26.0,0,1,0,4,16,17,5,3,10,0,25,0,0,6,1,33,45,17,0,3,5,0,4,2,0,1,0,1,5,1,18,12,0,0,5,0,0,5,5,11,0,0,6,5,26,5,33,36,3,31,0,1,0,0,9,11,0,4,15,142,44,9,0.0,0.0,0.12155241386458335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961044101505392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09528791941643952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170477439204288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756653220914844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795724410521822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682311059384344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227058467618263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298118630806268,0.08898555847675194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19523209080717072,0.0,0.2123706442222182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325962418592621,0.22316226079298646,0.24595406407263626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16697964006114993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333438607910076,0.0,0.0,0.130008087764534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690963630319972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12170727009639865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21179260499487165,0.0,0.0,0.08314464537280522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18471905269957525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09473335405345476,0.0,0.2922882157386544,0.0,0.0,0.118906439996148,0.17270818775671326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918692313186313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637340352170216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606118519385612,0.0,0.0,0.12994305509040796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816407989919489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021696603787972,0.14259119030861575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001164630268078,0.0,0.11467794477159733,0.0,0.0,0.3310080318389739,0.07981290151898242,0.1223793882229743,0.0,0.07263183124044395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813620612123045,0.12649654090108733,0.12693709542766374,0.08848372052295833,0.0,0.0,0.08021243858579062
mentalhealth,throw_away1710,2020/03/28,"I dont know what to do?  Throw away account cuz my friend has reddit and I dont want to worry him.

 So a bit of info about me, im 17 and Im starting to think that I have depression? (and/or adhd but thats another bag of worms that im not going to go into detail rn) I've tried to reach out to parents (re: my mom) about this and the conversation didn't end well, lots pf crying on my part and shouting on hers. So I've also tried to give hints to indicate that 'hey mom, yıur daughter is mentally ill and really needs help , ok, thx, love u' but honestly I dont think she knows what the signs of depression are, so this also didnt work out.
  The thing is -i know this is going to sound crazy but- im starting to scare myself? Like, I just find myself thinking of suice more and more lately and im really, really scared that im going to try something. My college exams are going to start next year and with how my grades are faring, I dont know what future-me will do with the added stress. Because whenever I think about my future - university, exams, school etc.- I just get this feeling of dread, like im not gping to live long enough to see it?
 I dont know what to do? Should I tell my mom that im suicidal? I dont know what she will do. I dont think I can take another round of 'you arent actually ill, you are just pretending, ıts because you read all those symptoms' and not being taken seriously. I know it would ruin what little remains of my self confidance. Should I tell it to a friend and get them to help talking to my mum? Should I make a 10+ page long powerpoint slide to make her understand? My original plan was to wait untill I was in college to see a professional but right now I dont think I will live long enough to see that. I dont want to die, i have a little sister, shes 11 I dpnt want to traumatize her, and a cat and a budgie, I dont want my dnd buddies to think I abandoned them, I dont want my firends to get accused of not being there for me even tho it was me who didnt tell them, i dont want to make my family sad and guilty because I couldtn deal with the stress of school. 
 Im just so so afraid that on one bad day im going to go too far and I dont know what to do.",0.7667438536306469,2.4130880943396207,3.035438822184105,92.6088357632933,81.0545073375262,6.34894225271584,19.645940537449974,7.348242739294969,0.2973484276729561,1699,42,402,24,44,582,204,477,0.175,0.721,0.10300000000000001,-0.9902,3,0,1,0,0,1,53.0,0,3,3,2,21,21,0,6,12,1,46,4,0,6,1,73,94,29,2,11,12,7,2,2,2,7,3,2,0,1,26,20,0,2,19,2,1,9,21,13,1,1,7,7,60,8,54,78,10,36,0,5,4,1,35,12,0,1,17,247,86,10,0.0,0.0,0.04180258348467695,0.0,0.05148156575882015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851322230615997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898363384055068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04024662795761765,0.0,0.035766978036102584,0.07833883319330494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0467667423921728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04705426508110533,0.02762622257857179,0.04416290840527298,0.0737906272836149,0.0,0.04445788422869495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6526580550683203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037940731884901616,0.08852382814030023,0.047774407930855016,0.02829333350870923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04038276706852327,0.0,0.02165959699936402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039152102198752134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661912836233526,0.0,0.06714145375958437,0.04109300707860388,0.17041617169579998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057425271304557275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4627114571291572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883360871071544,0.0,0.04832182937579736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0418558394452356,0.08586754888480913,0.0756514416016919,0.11372778507200808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036418355548243714,0.038661926974140164,0.0,0.08578178422781409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043169466547544416,0.0,0.0,0.15050999280343938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031762979344395856,0.0,0.0,0.04555747286925402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02902735622444282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047565249310666136,0.04638813099408368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042848439363864614,0.0,0.08232714346623761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0365824333708342,0.0,0.0,0.08577431380035025,0.08670635244009606,0.10240626311139904,0.0,0.04468817389938695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0329778977201745,0.0,0.0,0.09096042258218767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813892725560723,0.0,0.0,0.046856558030885696,0.0,0.0,0.04452388607756832,0.032207977911314,0.03443063507180686,0.11232387743984568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02845889778145942,0.19213685364018734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08725022189873695,0.0,0.0,0.04459466855851684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15159769372064436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0385154700456233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03118573487658824,0.04350289758483589,0.0,0.030430067133973383,0.0,0.0,0.027585525074208514
mentalhealth,haleysimone,2020/03/28,My friends are worried about me but I’m not I just told my friends that I’m talking to a guy I dated when I was 13... I’m almost 20 now. I broke up with a guy of almost two years 3 almost 4 months ago. I’ve been seeing someone who I was friends with for a long time but we’re not exclusive so I’m trying to figure out who/what makes me most happy. So my olddd ex and I started talking in the past couple weeks. My friends just freaked out at me! They’re saying that I’ve been going through guys super fast and they see a bunch of red flags so they’re worried about my mental health. I love that I’m cared for but it really seems unnecessary... before I started dating the two year guy I was hooking up with a few people... pretty normal for my age. Then was in that relationship. Now I’m talking to two people. I feel like that’s not a lot of guys to be going through quickly? Those are really the only red flags they’ve mentioned other than how hard and how much I work. And it’s not they don’t hook up with people or anything. Idk. I struggle with my mental health but I’ve been doing better lately. I actually feel in control of my life. Does that seem like I’m just turning a blind eye or are they being weird? I think I need an outside perspective,0.8955206149545774,2.9289975849056624,2.7985324947589127,92.47975541579315,82.58490566037736,4.982529699510832,20.38085255066387,6.037888025583468,0.01924458420684827,980,28,213,7,27,327,134,265,0.087,0.731,0.182,0.9876,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,3,4,14,15,0,1,11,0,14,6,1,4,0,41,38,17,0,2,13,1,3,2,4,0,4,1,0,5,11,11,0,1,6,0,0,2,5,4,0,3,8,10,29,11,30,28,5,31,0,1,6,1,22,9,0,9,22,130,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.09005219453383577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818008575115775,0.0,0.27721596651965624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593876788531237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07852368039737667,0.0,0.0,0.08161436584530919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940858463503082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350012657374072,0.0,0.10210632115315166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075505260653204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331931569378636,0.06592501594890436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851819123322545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048899645222512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4568596881906606,0.0,0.09823402256468826,0.08266496189836682,0.0,0.0,0.1961791421101219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409612077624802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518025668452562,0.09016691988620712,0.0,0.0,0.08166510114509078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784533529999404,0.08328651194977997,0.0,0.0615977712125076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859935379776888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365720052025669,0.0,0.06783658818254254,0.06842462251033399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904150340956314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018327449727513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809192286208402,0.19192648044135674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388217095820588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182341587660357,0.0,0.0,0.09907443390905736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338494408727991,0.0,0.0,0.14707079417027313,0.16801691423224846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818874083971819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13063284589023247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647133433576116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22251406412809804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05912944634653156,0.0,0.0,0.05380934518914506,0.0,0.0,0.08817771595034977,0.0,0.06265221987556076,0.10037439312958003,0.2704331325206036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740216355939635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06718110771351178,0.18743010931518986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188508873482046
mentalhealth,Clokorello,2020/03/28,"Am I the only one dealing with these kinds of trust issues? Hi everyone,

To make it short, everyone tells me that I should never assume and I should just trust people until proven guilty, but isn’t that being stupid an naive? Like, if I really think you’re lying to me and you’re trying to gaslight me by saying that I’m assuming, isn’t that a valid belief? Why do people get so upset at the fact that I don’t trust them because they’re being sketchy? Why is it logical for people to get upset at someone not believing them? Shouldn’t the normal response or logical response be to prove yourself, show some proof of something or just demonstrate by actions? People get so pissed off for being called out, and instead of fixing the way it’s being perceived, they just storm off and get mad at me. I truly don’t get it. I don’t really have any examples right now that are useful for understanding this but it’s something that I’ve always had in my mind.

Is assuming really that awful or necessary? Why am I supposed to believe and trust what everyone says when I know how easy it is to lie by just using words and not showing your actions? I have a friend who constantly tells me to stop assuming just because I use my logic and I connect the dots. Are they right all the time? No? Does he defend himself and his case to why I am wrong and he is telling the truth? Not at all. And this happens with a lot of people but my friend is an extreme case. If someone tells me I’m lying, I just go about explaining how I’m telling the truth and show proof of I have it. If I don’t have proof, I give the person my time in explaining it as best as I can to prove that I care and I’m telling the truth. Leaving no plot holes and not getting riled up. Yes, it sucks if someone thinks you’re lying, but also it’s just perception and I am aware that I might be doing something that is coming across as sketchy or suspicious that might not be my intention? It’s still up to me to fix that perception, not the other person because they can read my mind, they have nothing else to go off of except me expanding the information.

Am I making sense?im just tired of everyone telling me that it’s wrong to be careful with people being assholes and lying, because I’ve dealt with a lot of those and I know everyone has their lies and most people are not honest. Plus I’m also good at picking up non-verbal communication and people don’t take that i to account. When i bring that up they don’t even acknowledge that non-verbal communication is a thing an that I’m assuming. Fuck these people.

I needed to rant but I also want to know if anyone else struggles with this? It frustrates me a lot to the point it gets me really angry and I don’t know how to tell people to stop lying to me!

😞",4.132147264500205,5.074793269162214,5.143351158645277,83.80787741670096,70.85383244206774,7.964184834773071,26.86233374468669,8.222332236545338,1.6530132181543948,2188,70,440,31,39,719,218,561,0.193,0.703,0.10400000000000001,-0.9964,0,0,3,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,8,1,23,27,6,3,22,2,49,3,1,10,12,120,89,48,0,11,30,0,0,1,2,5,1,2,0,2,42,27,0,2,25,4,1,6,20,11,0,1,1,2,57,16,63,74,8,38,1,0,0,1,35,20,3,21,12,307,99,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628785520702814,0.05073705531256428,0.0,0.0,0.04146588425189367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04263595345531369,0.06247728851477283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14868202080350668,0.0,0.0,0.13739851804118494,0.06399072491933079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062263483645800775,0.0,0.12433853140047965,0.0,0.0,0.05252556832971462,0.0,0.06589357391780569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06286375031320986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053360654305427205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187552581201917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04027418296136279,0.0,0.0,0.2913267013269321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422007011912452,0.056371483467621775,0.2230027124612366,0.05849389521410873,0.06930832135359967,0.051143915551972965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05392102275015667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586472349397128,0.06364327582810493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349729425170902,0.13404362600196726,0.0,0.0,0.064564956169169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029789874977085157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551926895257265,0.0,0.0,0.08140412939040166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293721535641695,0.1231370918357512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04521305490992834,0.0470285787456723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05974369680492477,0.058508276391892974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041319028565792934,0.04637512239288765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4227319630714219,0.10648407343471754,0.0,0.0,0.05764218667866022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609926676196689,0.0,0.1562515748394697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041466262217085,0.0,0.0969813901736646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499472426276506,0.1408272962308861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04869564541528705,0.1019576112242315,0.0,0.06374552867862847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04584648870789665,0.0,0.4263668579549113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0405098556441364,0.07814213089902346,0.0,0.0,0.07111138620711198,0.07008313355368777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041398814542744716,0.0,0.0,0.0634783398737442,0.0,0.15799149043646446,0.0,0.0,0.03596532290045456,0.04840004284253428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22008602449282624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13333573196278262,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tooscaredtoblonely,2020/03/28,"How has COVID-19 Affected you mentally in regards to bills and responsibilities?? Okay, hear me out. 
I tend to be an anxious person on a daily basis, always worried about things and the list goes on and on. Since February, when COVID really got serious in Orlando, I was fine and taking precautions I could like limiting Disney trips and such... 

WELL now that we’re in lockdown, my husband hasn’t been able to work in two weeks, neither can I and it’ll probably be another two weeks until we can go back to “normal life” 

This has taken such a huge toll on me.. I know it’s not our fault we can’t pay the bills and we have no money for rent, after all we’ve been living paycheck to paycheck and had to save to get a car a couple of months ago. We were finalizing getting stable and now this... 

I’ve already told my landlord we won’t be able to pay and all she said was that she also had responsibilities to take care of which yes I understand, and I never told her I wasn’t going to pay, I let her know I wouldn’t be able to pay on time. Aperantly StateFarm doesn’t know how they can help, you need to submit a help application and they’ll answer you if they can help, at least that’s something. Ironically, the only people that I’m super happy that we’re able to help is CapitalOne with the car financing, they’re allowing us to extend our term by a month with out any bad consequences. 

How have you guys been ? Am I the only one flipping out more than usual with all of this ?",4.37003355704698,5.1212141577181205,5.624355704697987,81.27727181208057,70.1744966442953,8.778791946308726,26.64496644295302,8.982922981607832,1.902555167785235,1161,35,237,21,20,389,166,298,0.062,0.7859999999999999,0.152,0.9822,3,2,1,0,0,0,32.0,8,4,3,3,12,11,0,0,12,2,32,1,0,5,4,45,52,19,0,5,2,1,0,1,0,4,1,2,2,2,12,23,0,1,5,0,9,5,10,3,1,3,14,2,34,8,39,28,7,35,0,0,0,0,30,14,0,1,17,163,46,6,0.4498114385923689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09968267506073912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409452693916705,0.08992851123248019,0.09356978763797674,0.0,0.0,0.07647180073357157,0.11791662828648107,0.0,0.12703972296842894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646930776860914,0.09389344064707153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465318500145312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897844580565318,0.12442695031303967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318661109213035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750395569101635,0.0,0.1278191032303567,0.0,0.08993882462480987,0.0,0.0,0.1113460108650198,0.0,0.1197081601478226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674254564829718,0.0,0.3014991256702748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185403452298736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499066790451536,0.07942878039560346,0.05493878701071304,0.0,0.09929793530116003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332603333041548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951759941649195,0.0,0.0,0.08338237054404962,0.08673057785950612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017992645229747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620096800042964,0.17105093416460498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796065374448878,0.09818949953571587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12124320234492825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204018141060739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069684209710816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930221675566894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657170530674795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691011110486135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470868316096926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655721667827447,0.0,0.0,0.21490705291036413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197002076732001,0.11706739275676273,0.13526694420124125,0.0,0.1238509376820291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18040580191554065,0.0,0.1011086258691609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08186702113090556,0.11420133756434372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,btsdetective666,2020/03/28,"My messed up mentality is making my life hell during this dire time... (18F) my mentality basically consists of the idea that if I'm happy, depending on how happy I am, something really bad is going to happen because of it.

And with this whole pandemic thing happening, I feel like I can't let myself sleep once I start thinking about my family and if one of them dies. Sort of like OCD but not really, so, once I start thinking that something bad will happen I have to keep thinking about it and I can't let myself be cheered up because in those moments I whole heartedly believe that bad things will happen.

Hell, it's actually difficult writing this because I'm trying to rationalise something that won't let me think logically without incredible guilt and/or fear.",6.042167832167834,7.499862202797207,6.820566433566438,71.63238811188812,66.83216783216784,9.915804195804196,33.18111888111888,10.125756701596842,3.639246713286713,617,27,103,15,10,204,87,143,0.205,0.703,0.092,-0.9696,0,0,3,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,4,14,2,2,1,0,13,3,2,3,0,22,29,8,1,2,5,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,13,4,0,1,7,0,0,1,5,9,0,1,0,1,16,5,15,22,2,9,2,0,0,0,2,4,2,4,6,70,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.1077162197741694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764913083570742,0.2018622360073792,0.0,0.0,0.12436191870411492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11455835570612682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405765983905334,0.12420964302668275,0.05581209858617103,0.07885641813981156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273223284046929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3904392532494528,0.2350058789495213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308023642762859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246070447172134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098111965387065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.338617053530724,0.07796557196981037,0.1078534488704027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368037054368999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22247676380448872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351049502679912,0.07479722117369393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414261661959951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046100956153647,0.0,0.0,0.25493073746160944,0.0,0.0,0.15625689535362086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14666485333768814,0.28291150352342914,0.0,0.0,0.06436421990938024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494165267587986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.246473544524596,0.0,0.10640362797940177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cloboe3107,2020/03/28,Not really coping well at the moment So after the last couple of days everything’s started to catch up on me from last year ( a lot of things went badly wrong ) and well a few new things have risen up and well normally I just let myself cope inside and get through it but at the moment I’m struggling and last April I was in a bad place and I can feel myself sleeping back just don’t know what to do. :/,3.2325000000000017,4.135260107142859,4.19857142857143,89.89642857142859,72.92857142857143,7.028571428571429,21.142857142857142,7.1686216300943375,0.3972285714285717,315,6,69,3,6,102,60,84,0.22899999999999998,0.7709999999999999,0.0,-0.953,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,6,0,6,1,1,0,0,13,12,7,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,4,3,0,2,1,6,3,13,9,2,21,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,1,12,51,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361269623872114,0.2956292629882669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195882946473263,0.0,0.11417123095791375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910527601950492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951288379859162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092492104825814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729235890676516,0.4329150210105912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18102758919507492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505065873765543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709789628555127,0.0,0.0,0.1734541317727825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18496114371606112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341146723982125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17716021729394132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530442028552408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850726674556414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352248760881907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4775200750147725,0.16411077748292185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935571019099244,0.0,0.11400303987942464
mentalhealth,BonfireFanatic,2020/03/28,"Just stressing myself out? So I only recently realized that I do this because it's gotten worse but pretty much whenever someone in my life is, in my opinion, making a bad decision it will drive me crazy and I can't help but tell them. And if they don't stop, I will leave them alone because I know it's naggy but on the inside I'm losing my mind. It consumes my thoughts all day long and I lose sleep over it. I try to tell myself that it isn't my problem but then I think about all of the bad things that could happen if they don't stop and I just worry more. This usually has to do with my friends, for example 2 of my friends are in toxic relationships rn, and the rest of our friends have all talked to them but after that they're just like whatever and yet I'm still constantly fretting over them. I know this is not normal so I was wondering if there's something deeper to this or am I just stressing myself out?",4.455924956369984,4.720684570680625,5.321164921465968,85.26178228621292,69.78534031413615,8.460907504363004,28.482111692844683,8.344100000000001,1.7754289703315878,727,24,155,10,12,238,106,191,0.185,0.6809999999999999,0.134,-0.8995,0,1,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,6,2,10,11,0,2,4,0,16,2,1,1,3,41,26,18,0,6,14,0,0,1,3,2,1,0,0,0,15,9,0,2,7,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,3,0,30,4,19,20,6,20,0,2,0,0,15,8,0,6,12,116,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439733770375286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321366031324598,0.1694795183469535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15022140685736088,0.0,0.11098889849864163,0.0,0.0,0.08965053547853112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322198447723051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229268867222195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317608130846454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527935190113907,0.0,0.0,0.14719247982382613,0.0,0.0,0.09818751525623523,0.06791370786390709,0.0,0.0,0.12302027903012624,0.0,0.31103529654465417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279086042804824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036138937436002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218901207066973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13620117488376599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057240594922321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14142406860812148,0.0,0.13301466498039247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13725650110215365,0.14924569165217666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13911129986633364,0.0,0.11778349111485285,0.10701738832232052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101429057765724,0.2324386869199877,0.3184730505493758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173170209117153,0.24300332123141966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923526702928822,0.08907257673658643,0.0,0.11035913316474548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437928151530407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15310087568493475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15075139975627702,0.0,0.14117232467291085,0.14166399113445144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DaughterOfRageNLove_,2020/03/28,"Quarantine has given me too much time to think Quarantine has given me way too much time to think and spend time in my own thoughts, so this confession will probably sound stupid, but I need to get it off my chest anonymously (so I know how insane or normal this sounds) before I tell other people. 

Ever since quarantine started, I’ve felt off. I don’t know how else to describe it. I’m getting more sleep, but am more tired. I have more free time, but feel more anxious and stressed. I’ve felt emotionally numb in the past two weeks, at least more than usual. That being said, I can’t remember the last time I’ve ever felt an extreme emotion. I’m always just fine. My personality, which I’m now starting to debate the existence of, reflects that. I don’t really show much emotion. I don’t show excitement whatsoever, but I can’t even remember the last time I felt really excited to the point where I felt like I needed to jump up and down or scream at the top of my lungs. 

Like I mentioned before, I think my personality has disappeared from my life. I was never a super emotional person but I was more carefree. I thought I was more fun, but now that I’m writing this I remember that someone told me that my entire 5th grade class hated me. I can see that. Oh no embarrassing memories or comin back. My god help me. Anyway, I felt less anxious. But now, I feel like there’s a weight on me. Thinking of trying to dance sounds embarrassing, as does singing and all that stuff. Im too reserved. I’m not affectionate either, I can’t remember the last time I’ve hugged a friend or family member. Hugs just seem weird too now. But maybe if I had one I’d change my mind, I don’t know anymore. I think if I turned into this affectionate person people would feel scared.

I have friends but no BFF or anything like that. I just recently started hanging out with people again. Before that I just stayed in my room for 2 years. Those couple days within the last few months have been fun. I’m afraid to ask them to hang out sometime though, because I feel like I’m always invited out of pity. I’m in a group, but the other 5 are super close and I got invited last minute. We were planning on doing something this month, but, y’know, corona virus. I feel like I’m the person someone will talk to until someone else walks in the room. I’m the backup friend. Also, I’ve never dated not kissed anybody, I highly doubt anyone has a crush on me and I don’t blame them. 

I feel like my lack of personality has caused people to hate me. I don’t know why, I just do. 
I probably have no personality because I have no confidence. I feel really insecure about everything. I’m ugly, I’m untalented, and boring. 

The only mental illness I have ever been diagnosed with is anxiety. I’ve never went to a therapist about it, nor have I ever taken anything for it. Apparently it’s super noticeable. A friend of mind pointed out how anxious i was and was asking if I was okay. I felt normal when she asked me this, or at least before she told me about it. It was my default mood, I never thought anything of it. 

Ive never considered harming myself or committing suicide, I just want to fast forward until I get to a better part of my life. Like college? Maybe?  (Yes I’m still in high school). Thankfully, I have never experienced anything traumatic. The only death close to me was my grandfather who passed away 4 years ago. It hurt then but I’ve accepted it. 

Anyways, I doubt anyone will read this mess, but I need to start somewhere. This is probably also super pathetic. There’s people dealing with way worse thoughts and situations and here I am. Im sorry for ranting I need to stop

*This is my first post so sorry if I’m not doing this correctly",2.8298598967017767,4.945757467302457,4.356924234413764,83.33806356500875,76.50681198910081,7.324868843791939,24.579202082231888,8.257765969515432,1.6302147952336408,2927,100,565,54,67,975,309,734,0.193,0.6579999999999999,0.149,-0.9881,1,3,1,0,0,1,95.0,1,0,2,8,41,51,3,8,23,2,50,13,3,4,13,122,120,49,2,13,34,0,15,8,4,4,6,5,2,7,35,21,1,1,35,5,2,9,23,19,0,3,31,22,87,32,63,84,19,97,1,2,1,3,31,34,0,14,60,366,122,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04056219540348712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318619494779638,0.07614956175126274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03500516700617521,0.15508241719768545,0.04538018785907805,0.06399088694580535,0.0,0.1506215575418944,0.0,0.12833420740902002,0.0,0.04299166585006483,0.03518550195384959,0.0,0.05578797712406566,0.0,0.15574862978073642,0.0,0.0,0.040469720683314094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04700663764078708,0.04840648061097071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0506309674071469,0.0,0.029510480506545745,0.04717505782412144,0.0,0.04644396703401185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040043617185570826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645079711438847,0.2058888481093701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03022309201336805,0.16556491991370684,0.0,0.0,0.04112483597722591,0.0,0.04313709038529155,0.0,0.1619582913472961,0.13075967466570854,0.30754770049575986,0.0,0.0,0.03892220092523342,0.0,0.0,0.1414117749550956,0.0,0.07172086436059509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03659729412928184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035419328533234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030670992832923287,0.09669284493865096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04898547627887551,0.0,0.09885417665719316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573851735085168,0.18649663581819573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464123698735026,0.17884253708891815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09194123163149323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046113857853929886,0.0,0.09240618637455113,0.0,0.07304807923202096,0.0,0.10091340222112223,0.13571754590866938,0.21175089720160775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966733092940718,0.0,0.052096414697219366,0.0,0.0,0.031007179051775517,0.06960288145664327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04955205263921274,0.043681715538190315,0.1586160919658663,0.27968221810039257,0.0,0.0,0.08651324415505593,0.0,0.04382404394993728,0.0,0.1480063750856279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045770934878517314,0.0,0.08794230030943304,0.0,0.045181049712098666,0.0,0.20734207711668645,0.0,0.043526861521199126,0.0,0.045812293160392564,0.046310097520567736,0.036463641536009186,0.04165686713745533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03785194704086002,0.051434529616265406,0.045791598243479226,0.0,0.11631321776221198,0.035227168862851495,0.045256377936030885,0.10244590523285234,0.12955255439377958,0.04877252802508352,0.03654283870757796,0.0382561983746434,0.05241626667332148,0.0,0.052382594361707314,0.05005242893564522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03677899076592015,0.039994991306789116,0.04212832679356552,0.0,0.05312920567086472,0.0,0.14660116224750858,0.044957544976259464,0.1453087159198245,0.18677525741717504,0.05259272412826608,0.0,0.08744851468348122,0.0,0.031067053113655395,0.0497721646383991,0.044699456291662665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05039658026936501,0.0,0.026989579511860817,0.07264201732828257,0.03670475027261317,0.05572158886708422,0.0,0.042418636106402965,0.04128997586049344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04663187371428285,0.03250556243858455,0.0,0.0,0.05893401442415689
mentalhealth,HalfPintHobbit,2020/03/28,"What is love? (Not the Haddaway song) ""I love you because I know your heart. 
All that other stuff. I would give my right testicle to learn. Because all of it, even the annoying little ticks would make me love you more.
You don't need to be physically near someone to love them. You don't need to know they fart in their sleep to know their heart and mind.
Love is a million little pieces that come together to form something bigger. Most of them have nothing to do with physicality. I don't care that you can't say that about me.

I don't care that you'll never feel that way about me.

If I've gained anything from this experience, it's... Made things even more clear to me. What's important. What's not. What really fucking matters.

You matter to me. More than you know. I still love you. More than I can even put into words. I know you don't believe it. I know you don't understand it. But... I do.

I love you.""

These words were sent from one of my best friends. He's pretty sure he caught COVID-19, and I'm so scared of losing him. He lives in a different state, and I'm scared out of my mind because there isn't a damn thing I can do. He's tried calling about his symptoms but the hospital won't admit him because they're full. He doesn't think he's going to win this one... I need some comforting words right about now 😔🥺",0.6232074175824174,2.9366810586080585,1.8712534340659344,96.84171531593408,86.3992673992674,5.170741758241759,18.787660256410245,6.6274283507984215,-0.0826043040293043,1031,28,235,12,32,327,135,273,0.052000000000000005,0.782,0.166,0.9790000000000001,1,0,1,0,0,0,45.0,0,13,5,4,11,20,3,2,6,0,23,12,3,2,5,44,55,7,0,6,5,0,1,0,1,4,1,2,0,0,21,7,0,0,11,1,0,5,13,6,0,3,4,3,42,14,29,46,12,21,0,1,0,8,40,11,2,3,3,151,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430617735423604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22017519351501189,0.0,0.0,0.10173303111871698,0.0947604166673208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220263813033698,0.0,0.18412623170257125,0.0,0.0,0.07778228402453984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943404354769948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17891960263768306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832712715548904,0.0,0.0,0.045656532332674325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976271259755087,0.08347749253162688,0.0,0.08662045772994678,0.05131747935547811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21400314716889046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2977469750707843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18100126803383712,0.07973330458554903,0.0,0.0,0.10101848482145713,0.0,0.0,0.5704716774246112,0.08544056095793567,0.06027349455096333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18234708458558213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20086073071378807,0.0696420883312353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866417540412594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237424620894308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186381923073596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077274129248222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057846134558480214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422512727752394,0.0,0.07180725764099201,0.18080473664646826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036153060540436,0.0,0.07650777864496029,0.06951451837118595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211075753953136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336768283207794,0.0,0.0,0.08510321268838661,0.09385244999417557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997772504720446,0.05785823564742033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061305273858814326,0.0,0.0,0.09400165326098184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716730156168184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282878295499681,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lapetitepapillon,2020/03/29,"I'm having a...strange day. I would like some reassurance that i'm not about to drop dead :( I (18F) have issues with dissociation due to traumatic events, I have been pretty stable as of the last few months since i got clean and have sought help as well as started studying for my dream career and got away from those abusing me, at least I have that going for me :) 

A few nights ago I was with a friend and I felt that familiar feeling of being ""spaced out"". It started to become pretty overwhelming so I ended up going home and went to bed. The next day I felt more or less ""normal"".

Today, I woke up more or less normal also. About 5 min before I left for my class it hit me again, but it was even worse this time. I feel like i'm watching myself (which hasn't happened in a while) I can barely think and when I can the coherent thought becomes quite jumbled at the end, the kind of incoherence you might hear from someone sleeptalking, think ""oh yeah I have to make sure I do that - and then go jump off a balcony"", or (related to my class) ""Some children have trouble learning when they have - the sky is falling"", just really strange stuff. A lot of it is me telling myself i'm going to die though, or it's even sexual. I'm writing this post because I keep thinking that i'm going to die today, like the lecturer is talking, her words don't sound real and i'm not taking it in, my brain just keeps tacking on comments at the end of her sentences like ""okay, but don't move or you're gonna die, you're gonna die anyway though"", or ""if you keep listening someone's gonna rape you again"" (i'm sorry if this is too graphic). I'm not hallucinating it, its just thoughts. The hard part is no one is noticing because it's purely internal and i'm just on autopilot anyway, for everyone else here, i'm completely normal. 

I don't have schizophrenia either. i'm just scared and i'm convincing myself of these things because i'm not mentally strong enough to stop it right now. I feel pretty trapped. I would appreciate any advice or anyone willing to comment. Sorry this is so long, it's difficult to get my thoughts out.",3.0408713272543078,4.756166697399532,4.131466396487674,86.96800000000002,74.69739952718676,6.820101317122594,25.560891590678825,7.554174236665415,1.2566534143870312,1655,57,336,21,35,538,213,423,0.161,0.726,0.113,-0.9861,1,1,0,0,1,0,64.0,0,3,1,2,24,17,1,2,14,2,31,2,1,1,2,65,80,32,5,7,21,0,6,4,1,7,0,3,3,1,25,13,0,4,12,1,0,9,9,5,1,1,12,10,38,12,43,59,13,55,0,1,1,1,17,17,0,13,31,214,63,5,0.0,0.09469087931908796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809586640517956,0.07084332116561116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639111500499556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054347621953162915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05588118333437488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508647796216042,0.0,0.0,0.1461535380888253,0.17652838783320338,0.06800513440473202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921597145798207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379349148508038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308221374511686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33177298211393136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06676202211771788,0.0,0.21235338758396707,0.0825776320662491,0.0,0.10557141657755442,0.0,0.0,0.07636597513463153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121228257021284,0.05709410903247882,0.15346943698426588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06174517731405705,0.0,0.041754349319860086,0.0,0.22709888593306335,0.0,0.12783695931656391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07067205758718582,0.0,0.07159167547944298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007445738427873,0.0,0.053567983047193374,0.0,0.08016521628067655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341461316862568,0.0,0.2131068864655357,0.0,0.08322328114546428,0.0,0.06514460539499609,0.0,0.0,0.086832165690103,0.0,0.0,0.15617743525753214,0.0,0.0,0.07072574988135008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794422762997586,0.0,0.0,0.05334651520585704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053949766857159,0.08478136931145905,0.0,0.0,0.06379053803779296,0.08494118892016081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499470281612756,0.0749985143904735,0.2349107879851971,0.0,0.09098824659906576,0.0,0.0,0.054155144270512004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654442750485906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765402560053335,0.24391889001807845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500363357265714,0.0,0.0909652539115844,0.05119812149293567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682503408731274,0.0,0.0,0.0800128041741993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610977572305711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543012255241754,0.0,0.0,0.17892542783541715,0.11313407875791175,0.0,0.0,0.06681581509755262,0.0,0.0,0.09148806959140418,0.0,0.0,0.07532265821935392,0.0,0.060089099295234025,0.06423581931546858,0.06985267897799986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053094594740836484,0.1536264955637869,0.15703991196180414,0.1903401417441344,0.046601378505186336,0.0,0.15150762706472373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185672786869003,0.07408566107432019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144423084681347,0.11354424860876745,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vs_devil,2020/03/29,I wanted all of you to die in a nuclear apocalypse The coronavirus and major recession will have to do for now.,3.12409090909091,5.2961132272727305,5.863636363636362,72.61545454545455,75.81818181818181,11.672727272727276,29.181818181818183,11.20814326018867,4.462381818181818,89,4,16,4,2,32,21,22,0.271,0.7290000000000001,0.0,-0.7717,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,15,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8694051407166189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4940998899974742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway557786,2020/03/29,"Insight on “emotional self harm” For quite some time I’ve noticed that I seem to like making myself feel sad. Occasionally I’ll get intrusive thoughts like “hey, what if you and your boyfriend got into a big fight about this thing you’ve been worrying about and break up?” And my brain will grab onto that and visualize every single detail of what it would be like, every word we might say, over and over until I’m completely numb. It’s not always about my BF, it could be about my parents, or about my roommate or any other situation. 

Some googling came up with the term “emotional self harm” but I can’t find much else that supports this, besides an article simply calling it that by suggesting that you’re inflicting mental pain to yourself. I’d like to talk about it with my therapist, but I’d like to know if it’s really a thing, so maybe she’ll have a tangible idea of what I’m talking about.",8.704375000000002,6.7412143238636375,8.410454545454545,73.94818181818181,62.01136363636364,11.981818181818182,36.20454545454545,10.686352973137794,3.583797727272728,715,25,140,14,8,230,113,176,0.092,0.809,0.099,0.0653,1,0,0,0,1,0,14.0,1,2,0,1,8,12,1,0,5,0,10,3,1,1,0,31,21,13,0,4,7,1,2,5,1,4,2,1,0,2,19,10,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,6,0,0,4,3,12,6,25,10,5,13,0,1,0,0,15,8,0,8,8,87,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703990931758572,0.0,0.0,0.09565323219326304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570224367971861,0.14362899925524272,0.16087690972496868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474787306096682,0.0,0.0,0.1123051050379864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750290028920353,0.31644584102709256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370232637525849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112163145632414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12856016588867042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07348874388677376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124981913921292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878736932918733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730274123725905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34359544956059523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938912582060145,0.0,0.14131129799336858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417516166182925,0.1492174213510333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034008616137864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014168727196348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14967154507642694,0.0,0.1561856451761639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14960861224808794,0.0,0.0,0.0901100292344559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185802015404188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12805105742165726,0.2934769132243453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810708672871795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15961864822669666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22611343493197386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633164333668737,0.1868957432334118,0.0,0.0,0.1116678713783213,0.08201964167860533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428464735240346,0.0,0.09992041957000417,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,im-not-so-sure-,2020/03/29,"I’m not sure if I have a mental illness I’ve had it for about a year now, never told anyone about it. 

Whenever I do something embarrassing, wrong, say something, do something that makes me cringe or unpleasant and think about it later, I tend to hit myself, the wall, make noises automatically. 

I literally cannot sleep at night without overthinking and hurting myself. 

I’m too afraid to ask for help because it’s hard to explain.

I’m sorry if this isn’t the right sub to ask those questions but I really don’t know else where to ask.",5.179142857142857,6.082106152380952,6.1057142857142885,78.00428571428574,68.42857142857143,8.666666666666668,29.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.253285714285715,426,15,81,7,7,141,72,105,0.121,0.843,0.036000000000000004,-0.6251,0,0,3,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,2,4,0,7,2,1,2,2,16,21,6,0,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,2,2,8,1,12,18,0,9,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,4,5,49,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406458107815198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4976249100494899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081609013632906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482216698312092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15894422231349584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892893062383356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18994462754046315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751198787872982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368744778145259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17880972524698793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684649803593302,0.0,0.0,0.16650791400858111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198764449109162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11366748368590986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152595996758247,0.0,0.14110104933953307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17756014095531114,0.0,0.0,0.4097874703228013,0.0,0.1986205993151815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16722756176726375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369126228996315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954388129205167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103811794924784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939940401010281,0.0,0.1142603917488922
mentalhealth,Anxiety_Person,2020/03/29,"Something wrong with me I am a 16yr old who is going on 17 next month

So I wanted to at least tell somebody about this and realized I don't have anyone to tell so I'm asking and saying it here. So recently I was having difficulties with a job and was given  a test to see if i was good Enough, I wanted to ace it but after failing Miserably I was given the results. The guy told me straightforward that I didn't do well at all just in some areas. So while telling me this I felt like I was listening but it just wasn't reaching my brain, it was like I was not taking in most of the information. So I had trouble answering the questions that was very simple for most people. After that I started to Realize that I had some difficulties understanding certain things even if they are simple. I looked back in my life to find that I was having this issue all along for years and it just made me feel like I was stupid very stupid. And it would explain why I was having such a hard time in school. I wasn't able to process things that any others can. I'm failing all my classes and its wrecking my life. I did tutoring and it didn't help. 

After that I searched for solutions to solve this because at the time I thought it was just something that can be fixed. So I searched and did the things that were suppose to help me but nothing worked, nothing was helping. So I searched what could be the problem and found a woman who was having the same problems as me. She was slurring her words, can't remember basic information, always done the opposite of what others tell her to do, and having to repeat others because she was having problems blocking them out when they were telling her things. All that stuff sounded the same as what I was going through. I was having the same problems this woman had and I didn't know if it was true. The only people I can talk to are my grandma and my mom. But after trying to bring it to light, my mom quickly dismissed it as something that ""I thought I had"". I didn't want to say anything because she already had a whole lot going on in her life, she even had to bury my dead brother who only lived for 3 days after birth because he didn't have a brain. Right now I'm the only child she has by her side. My siblings are something else. 

I want to tell me grandma but I know things are just gonna go downhill, so I'm stuck with no answers whatsoever and no one to talk to. I don't even have any friends because of my social skills and my family. But thats not what I came here to talk about. 

I just want to know if there is something wrong with me. Because I am very worried and scared because of this. No one seems to see this as a problem but I do.",3.9185201577985183,4.8032348811700185,4.649907149042626,87.36364740690851,71.3034734917733,7.074165303569711,27.923073222361204,7.0608816371341465,1.292823765996344,2108,74,440,18,38,678,211,547,0.177,0.777,0.046,-0.9972,1,0,5,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,3,5,28,22,2,2,21,0,69,5,2,2,6,91,108,40,1,16,19,3,3,3,1,2,3,4,0,4,47,22,0,1,20,0,0,6,15,14,1,2,47,11,70,8,59,56,15,41,0,3,3,0,47,14,0,11,24,341,117,8,0.06725714218657028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421992885766805,0.0,0.055963330156551985,0.0,0.0,0.09147432606509352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04702775762329734,0.0,0.055346897339638025,0.0,0.0628763488976246,0.0,0.0,0.05171659080584631,0.0,0.2869953073309631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15016242790521175,0.0,0.07692425315431667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536993552725074,0.0,0.0,0.04337529266578938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688274076378674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05618471204889302,0.0,0.0,0.06949460684610306,0.0,0.1332681242910438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06340404792113108,0.0,0.034007231940539784,0.04804851581669825,0.0645774038274551,0.0,0.06147180949265935,0.0,0.0,0.07374398491045768,0.05196270121478943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15289513538431124,0.05641209987259745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659514491753599,0.0,0.0,0.06024918875012344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352431340638409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019898248865737,0.06674233567288307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088829925854747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251712566911848,0.09857532714864793,0.0,0.0593892887587077,0.0,0.05647906029261272,0.0,0.0,0.05717961714885706,0.0,0.06364033414659792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15754150411280587,0.053684009222755236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152873373105978,0.0,0.0,0.12907008372633982,0.0,0.0705750568557169,0.0,0.09115036034828193,0.15345626206736065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325526785640988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32178000898545106,0.0,0.0,0.0753433917690469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640831394714725,0.0,0.07618923110108361,0.05743723194054951,0.0,0.10697115794156396,0.06733613243207624,0.06806781858026062,0.10719046902228596,0.06122837624505111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856018656757283,0.0,0.2588891697094601,0.0,0.0,0.04760495141026549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769933366733356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05056900066967997,0.162176229702898,0.3527142404976192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234132836484956,0.0,0.0,0.10678931640090383,0.0784363609531984,0.0,0.0,0.06426708160077615,0.0,0.04566318466991843,0.0,0.0,0.07001705696673438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16648255812499912,0.19835002517052988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060472248083788586,0.0,0.0606891096441153,0.07509019736028827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04896400054052055,0.06830289262983524,0.0,0.04777754410765884,0.14707025355590342,0.0,0.04331139445612631
mentalhealth,fauxpumashorts,2020/03/29,"I feel like a psychopat, am I normal for doing these things? I've never felt normal tbh but it has rarely ever been an issue, i just know i have to deal with things other people doesn't and that's it. The thing is, sometimes i feel like a psychopat and sometimes like some lifeloving hippie. What i mean with this is, I respect people and animals and life and sometimes i dream about the world being a better place, y'know those daydreams like oh i become a millionare and i help my community and we are super chill and kids go to school and grown folks learn how to have a vegetable garden and shit like that. Like fuck capitalism let's all help each other yadah yadah.
But some other times i think about how i could get away with murder, and i plan it in my head to detail, like a lot of times or how to hurt people. And tbh i thought it was common, maybe not normal, but common. Until a few times i have let some thingd slip out and suddenly my friends are staring me like dude ??
Also I have a big problem in connecting with my emotions and feelings and i know how to lie and manipulate even thought i try not to do it, it's always in the back of my head, and even thought i feel some kind of pride when i do manipulate someone i also feel like the biggest asshole on earth. I have problems with my empathy like my friends or family cry or are sick or angry and i just don't care.
Whenever i'm seeing someone romanticly i always find myself speaking of them as i was superior and them superficial and dumb, and it doesn't help that most of the time they do dumb shit and my friends agree with me. Cause c'mon the people I date are human too and have emotion and feelings and I want them to like me and shit but i alwats end up thinking about them as ""oh yeah that asshole i'm seeing"" and i feel no connection (romantic or sexual to them) 
I feel a disconnection even to my own body, i see it in some kind of superficial way idk. 
All of this mixed feelings also happened to me as a child, i used to find pleasure in hurting smaller kinds than me, it never went overboard like i think i would tell them they couldn't play with us until they cried and man i felt so good when they cried and it's so fucked up.
I also used to choke my pets (specially when they made me angry) but stopped before even hurting them bc i knew they were alive and where going to feel pain, i also used to grab my baby cousin's leg and squish (?) it until he woke up or made noises, again, i would let go before hurting him (he was a baby and i was 11 maybe) 
So it feels like some kind of battle in which i wanna hurt people or do fucked up things vs me wanting to be kind a grow a fucking garden and adopt children and stuff
And i'm confused, is there something wrong with me? Is this what being human is? 
(besides the bad things i've done i'm also a ""good person"" like i'm that girl who takes a 3 hour bus ride to give you back your wallet that you lost, or gives my lunch to a homeless women, or protests for someones murder and rights, like i'm always up to help whoever who asks me to i have no issue to do things for people even if i don't know them and i go to quite the lenghts to do so, cause it does bring me pleasure to make people happy)
so ??

TL;DR: I like doing good things but i've also done things that could be considered ""psychopat like"" specially as a child, is there something wrong with me or am i just a little too rough sometimes?

Sorry for any spelling mistakes, english is not my first language",3.786928471248245,4.7036392510518965,4.601414025245443,87.47133842917253,71.63674614305752,6.9382215988779805,25.05943899018233,6.918507183188421,0.8836759270687233,2738,77,572,22,50,884,281,713,0.187,0.647,0.16699999999999998,-0.9781,0,0,2,0,0,0,63.0,2,3,14,7,39,67,13,1,27,1,53,16,7,14,5,143,113,80,2,15,24,1,15,17,3,2,3,1,3,10,42,49,2,1,27,4,0,9,12,27,0,1,19,20,91,40,71,82,13,55,0,6,4,4,48,21,9,20,41,395,133,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519863169261598,0.11236690363099082,0.0,0.0,0.0306113746058135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04208244111208577,0.0,0.04229256446053359,0.06922667824267018,0.037585191627564594,0.0,0.049714931530762514,0.07660797545754608,0.0,0.0,0.039811629460184544,0.0,0.050000914326801336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04589523931909117,0.09248449499162334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188076265979362,0.0,0.14833880303075309,0.0,0.04640792894404782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039392454969295665,0.09213083709851036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012704114646143,0.039869448208475614,0.0,0.0,0.14865812267310394,0.040718153794469504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042435624200336856,0.0,0.2503672838316731,0.1286333492850578,0.08644187652069373,0.0,0.08228479701453917,0.038289274421632866,0.0,0.0,0.10433417424364294,0.1664605618469586,0.023518196059318944,0.08636393849338986,0.10233101386995032,0.1132679733724505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039806135967262256,0.04791872688371265,0.0,0.0,0.0923956398135449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068896757607415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0443301730124624,0.0,0.24094453799249066,0.0,0.0,0.09396679668907648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23437815156514674,0.09895507410722576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809099737280692,0.03179504245811885,0.37386043153820825,0.045116311981504134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491385976818449,0.03826968190211332,0.0,0.08518753588692697,0.030047499820480713,0.0,0.09044614551380342,0.04903394048858506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943584911478305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231383217022624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04789855636982958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218451498117696,0.039304887864705686,0.04703052708620107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614551268696996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047878416325012316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038442100617434256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04555703403987205,0.10761208338651523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386200807671578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442181089181995,0.06930865694249445,0.17808179732183796,0.05038999960932648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03763410195402155,0.0,0.0,0.05153078404495343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033845269804768034,0.0,0.03934461981166306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392448421101173,0.08653033998680305,0.0,0.10720935290369672,0.10499316829714887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030561861710369388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414684970155375,0.11663411465922248,0.0,0.0,0.05310138645238606,0.035730380989586114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04172885293895304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395395793939275,0.09843248523674447,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,perplexedegg,2020/03/29,"I don't feel like I exist Hi everyone. This is my first time posting on here so I'm a little nervous but I'm gonna give it a whirl. For reference, I'm diagnosed with anxiety, depression, and OCD.
So the earliest I can remember feeling like this was in I want to say second grade. I remember sitting in art class and asking my friends if they feel like they are actually there or we are in a dream, because I felt like I was just dreaming, not actually there. 
Most days, at least at some point in the day but many times for a long period in the day, I feel like I am in a dream and things around me are not real. Last night I went outside in the rain with my father and it was even worse. 
Does anybody know what's going on?",1.8307591093117423,3.408680355263158,3.7976315789473714,88.66072874493929,77.6842105263158,7.571659919028341,24.19230769230769,8.384062270229773,1.3908748987854254,562,19,126,11,13,191,95,152,0.162,0.758,0.08,-0.9127,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,2,1,8,8,0,1,9,0,10,1,0,0,0,28,25,10,0,2,7,1,5,5,1,1,1,1,0,0,6,8,0,0,9,4,0,2,3,2,0,2,5,6,17,6,17,19,3,28,0,1,0,0,9,14,0,4,15,81,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.2671982959922739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473164985882782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187412595778573,0.12798732706041774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345577790643348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648764376155175,0.0,0.1179157376577587,0.13895529458845302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198061444306298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042420194243926,0.0,0.0,0.13081821919160194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.276892331892877,0.3912187152350215,0.13144989251577574,0.0,0.0,0.11645098903020183,0.0,0.0,0.10577215999212182,0.0,0.0,0.13133137420353694,0.07780604329554977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752391918063665,0.11159552736266036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33442337903567193,0.13721438264374525,0.0,0.12115626932226578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879978377270474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847569977703546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941910537664655,0.0,0.13111676986294735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558274153383898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3101724642215837,0.0,0.0,0.10887203867220556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095333779802896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15966035494667918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074988446061558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12691194255411262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13951749092480545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unlimitedricepud,2020/03/29,"Are there less known mechanisms behind anxiety and depression? Other than diet, exercise, and amount of well known neurotransmitters? Other than Serotonin, GABA, dopamine, exercise, diet etc. what other neurotransmitters and brain/body processes regulate anxiety and depression? Are there any less widely known mechanisms behind these disorders?",11.531875,16.273796770833336,9.787333333333336,41.991000000000014,60.45833333333334,14.673333333333332,40.85,12.340626583579946,8.320744999999999,287,15,25,13,5,88,30,48,0.21100000000000002,0.752,0.038,-0.8645,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,7,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,4,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,5,2,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,22,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995236835006211,0.0,0.4489040440289493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.325903907725455,0.0,0.3275340964821534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5054140898245655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3362645532501835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32722121751961497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638039809914513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Y275300,2020/03/29,"Anger and Sadness I am a 20 year old, I live in the middle of the Indian Ocean.

I feel very anger at everyone and everything. I hate most people even my own family. I feel like I have been treated unfairly my entire life. After all the pain and suffering, I finally found something worth holding onto and now my job is being taking away from me. I can understand the circumstance, the entire world is going to shit but I just can’t stop myself from having these feelings.

I have always suffered from a mental illness, whether it be loneliness, PTSD (from my fathers suicide), never reaching an goal/expectation of my mother. I have always dealt with it all by myself. I have always being able to keep myself in check. But somehow it’s overwhelming me now.

I think it the frustrations from my love life, I have never had any success there, all my life I have been told to be fun, kind, honest, caring, helpful and friendly person. People will love and cherish you, but now being honest is wrong, tell people what they want and treat people differently. There is no need to be nice to everyone, just to the select few. I don’t know what the fuck to do anymore. I have tired fucking everything and all anyone sees is a friend who is reliable and will help, they only talk when they need something. Nobody really care about me. I feel like I don’t wanna continue living on like this, I don’t wanna fight myself anymore. I think I should let the demons take over and let them destroy everything. 

I feel like it doesn’t matter anymore, I’ll always be the loser fat kid in the conner, never cared for or loved.",5.2718365131068685,6.384208325732902,5.9472591903210805,78.46181324647124,68.34853420195441,8.453482239801456,27.32263068093687,8.704169506293173,2.091617465487824,1264,39,224,20,21,412,168,307,0.185,0.5920000000000001,0.223,0.9629,2,0,2,0,1,1,41.0,0,1,4,2,11,37,9,1,15,0,37,13,2,0,7,47,65,16,1,6,7,2,5,4,2,3,7,0,0,2,10,11,1,3,10,0,2,1,9,16,0,0,5,6,42,21,29,48,7,24,1,5,1,5,21,10,3,3,17,169,52,2,0.08681449429051996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889464552553994,0.0,0.0,0.0590368331134126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582899517570884,0.06070271294546505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08156507514434153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655394884357868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070266901038096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05734015471189275,0.0,0.0,0.1659099392960239,0.23406980891223775,0.0,0.08184097892497115,0.0,0.21948008398488644,0.18606087620251088,0.0,0.0951010350363081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951876120339746,0.13414532587238293,0.16051720212292356,0.0,0.0,0.04933867774610851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571133985162124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637985110387045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614998988711782,0.07716471141047845,0.0,0.0904039364292636,0.04771097566690285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754740454799964,0.18395893418102324,0.1696527069634393,0.0,0.15331757794759165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23506041168404895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748859125787059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287436949879153,0.2008700698219726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910972079880784,0.0,0.0,0.06602633491887874,0.09237674280206884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407449575072125,0.075803067823336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148149807274373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055615588054681364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691799120390781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911383083141346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13366807815457366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258080452260306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496096619123122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054739101869958,0.06977820203612316,0.07587969451364306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11125444505145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978049025893183,0.0,0.08295496964801195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903769502340126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163104973903102,0.05120543801853607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491802113905268,0.0,0.05590568799809388
mentalhealth,redd_throw_away,2020/03/29,"My sister is recovering from anorexia. Today she had a breakdown and wants to go out. Its 00.30 and she is in pajamas. My sister started eating less and we took her to the hospital in time so her organs are all fine. After 4 or so weeks in hospital she is back home and every 4 to 5 days she has a breakdown. She thinks that she didnt get a good treatment in the hospital (which I somewhat agree.. there was no specialized care they just had a menu that she would eat) and she is saying things that it is to late and that now they just let her be. 

I think she has depression as well. She doesn't have it on paper but I think she has something of that sort. Today was one of the breakdowns and after laying for half a day she started crying later at night and saying she wants to go out. She is not telling us where. She is not dressed to go out. She got to the door and was crying there on the floor while my dad wasn't letting her go. 
She was saying things like I don't want to wake up here anymore and I don't want to live anymore. Its not fair... and so on.

I don't understand this behaviour and I don't know what we should do. We are still in contact with the doctors over email but i dont feel like there is profesional help that is obviously needed.

Any advice about this would be helpful.",1.65189591078067,3.548070947955392,2.9945040892193298,92.75820966542751,79.29739776951673,5.9396877323420085,21.1689219330855,6.918507183188421,0.3423991375464688,1011,28,224,11,25,328,136,269,0.062,0.867,0.071,0.4907,0,0,1,0,0,3,25.0,4,0,2,0,15,8,0,0,11,0,37,4,1,0,2,45,58,20,0,8,8,3,1,2,0,3,1,3,2,0,16,19,2,0,6,0,0,5,12,1,1,2,10,4,38,7,32,41,3,38,0,1,0,0,38,16,0,3,19,173,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142506734642851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950808019871601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319019852050009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990253388627037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192054396612612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25685731964724845,0.15080455451337288,0.0,0.10070108791673224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196702727363277,0.0,0.0,0.13702673382454647,0.0,0.0,0.2392720963599081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850824813387343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05911712806805928,0.08352606492590753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061084699478289387,0.0,0.2657882098519931,0.09806506270746952,0.09350980639466444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673500841932758,0.0,0.1172780374950795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425493847875917,0.0,0.1318883161019016,0.0,0.0,0.2391126443513297,0.0,0.11424021513201628,0.0,0.10324051647479512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08669303116678055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971938941654633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922649417013393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789330658259828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000899707396036,0.0,0.0,0.1655099723561761,0.0,0.09337066725714567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021912680386332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15534991762512887,0.2247485224001121,0.0,0.0,0.0681756810399952,0.0,0.22164871489244906,0.0,0.12989992371213455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171550248159768,0.1406376591713513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758444759235027,0.0,0.09378436776314523,0.0,0.10512309972136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611003205014085,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Grebnrok,2020/03/29,"Feeling like I deserve to die, and deserve to die alone I can’t take this loneliness anymore, and yet I feel that I deserve to be this lonely. What else is there to do but to die?",2.1320175438596465,3.371234131578952,3.6342105263157904,91.56780701754387,76.10526315789474,6.119298245614036,28.456140350877188,6.42735559955562,1.1323403508771932,139,6,31,1,3,46,25,38,0.361,0.5710000000000001,0.068,-0.9155,0,3,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,7,3,3,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,4,1,5,6,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693525451911272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579180807577053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8097301657512271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21725386996382065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26299690703799145,0.18579299646693145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705633807382175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19553915460366714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alpster,2020/03/29,"Fear and Uncertainty (Video) Now more than ever more people are struggling to cope with feelings of fear, anxiety and uncertainty. This is my effort to try and express to you the ways in which I have learnt to deal with such feelings through my ongoing journey with mental health and spiritual development.

Here's the link: [https://youtu.be/YNWJ9QzoPMo](https://youtu.be/YNWJ9QzoPMo)

I hope it can in some way help to shed light on a struggle we are all facing on a daily basis. Stay safe everyone!",7.6513425129087755,10.607247180722897,6.663201376936318,68.40963855421688,65.144578313253,8.598278829604133,29.929432013769365,9.23628265651192,2.8738998278829606,408,15,62,8,7,124,63,83,0.195,0.715,0.08900000000000001,-0.8424,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,1,0,1,4,6,0,4,4,0,5,2,1,0,2,16,8,4,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,3,6,2,15,8,4,10,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,2,45,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630324817480941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197123285348016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19277482506507093,0.0,0.20364062784670545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4796275139703722,0.21551481384262572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22653140444365755,0.0,0.0,0.14284657114612204,0.0,0.0,0.21167139844019747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21476991346959676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14774718894394798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2271523596403675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4455883866260635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469117570059287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383217215369594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,quarantinedthroaway,2020/03/29,"Can’t handle this level of depression anymore. I’m struggling. A lot. In a million areas of my life right now.

I’m quarantined to my apartment with my ex who dumped me a month ago and who has already moved on to dating her old, toxic ex girlfriend again. My ex gave me no reason for the breakup and doesn’t know that I know she went back to her ex girlfriend.

I can go to work because I am an essential behavioral health employee, but I’m isolated in my office at work and I absolutely hate my job at this point. I can’t see friends because of social distancing. I’m confined to my apartment and I have to deal with my ex being happy and moved on from me every single day. It really hurts because I love her and she lead me to believe that I was the one for her, and then she dumped me and ran back to her ex. I feel like garbage. She doesn’t even appear to care about the breakup and never did, for someone who claimed to have loved me more than anything for over a year.

I’m planning on moving out of town in a month, but I don’t know how to deal until then. I’m so fucking depressed I can’t stand it. I don’t want to hurt myself, but if something happened and I died I think I would be at peace with it all. I’m just in so much pain with nowhere to run to.

I’m on antidepressants, see a therapist, exercise, meditate, eat well, drink water, all of it. But this unshakable loneliness and feeling of worthlessness just does not go away. I just want to be able to move on. I want to be able to move past this. I hate feeling so useless and in pain.",1.7540738763745054,3.5330315665634733,3.293731183943631,91.2860371517028,78.53560371517028,6.436596562399916,24.760222056154586,7.372421405659032,1.0196459698943094,1208,44,266,16,29,398,157,323,0.172,0.7070000000000001,0.121,-0.9706,2,1,2,0,0,2,33.0,0,0,0,4,14,21,5,1,10,0,19,11,0,3,3,46,52,24,1,5,9,6,3,1,3,1,5,0,0,0,13,17,3,1,8,2,0,12,10,14,1,2,5,5,42,7,52,42,6,52,0,6,2,3,27,23,1,3,17,179,55,4,0.18873350152263346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836504307859785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413605604302256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358645965287578,0.0,0.0,0.07765579530830409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866066870373572,0.14512441284711006,0.0,0.17257528615075454,0.0,0.0,0.10631901306114014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096213191615415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06085874747454007,0.1945759528095932,0.1625558883075353,0.0,0.09793778870170672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258097951753966,0.0,0.0,0.09244348994886396,0.0,0.09656074471398124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06232834888382688,0.0,0.07950805752099631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431439937655871,0.06741562559925303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290751755134686,0.08724054047327391,0.0,0.0,0.10726159828056196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344820604725207,0.1004551609280219,0.0,0.18633525913609308,0.0,0.10030744327107316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20204311685910345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364443910209308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558449494404936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665402681908973,0.046102827773281764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022723691032974,0.17033935377204545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15064528029273105,0.5014846091161046,0.06937041978707333,0.0,0.07278145571277911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990220307278984,0.0,0.06394535254657358,0.0,0.20082575232133806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008374142209416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920708149885809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060453756936453,0.09702473654277888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058868953899828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15039616530472327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09619501851601706,0.07995664168838278,0.07264813507837407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986526171139762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956707095056822,0.0,0.060466403525460816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16697986367169002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484704192559141,0.08747892337576038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740023691363154,0.0,0.0,0.06703543222649036,0.0,0.0,0.06076909355483229
mentalhealth,myrebelyell69,2020/03/29,"Bulimia replase The title explains it all. My first ever childhood memory was watching high school musical and thinking how much I wanted to have gabriella's body since I was a fat kid. Ever since that, I've binged and purged up until I was 17. I am now 20. Tonight, my roommates and I (we've been quarantined together) decided to get drinks and food and hang out together. I made up an excuse to go to my room a few floors ups because ""I felt sick"" and ended up purging all the food and drinks I ordered. I felt really good, so I kept binging and purging for the next 2 hours. I feel disgusted with myself but I can't tell my friends or anyone in my family because no one knows. I feel lost and close to relapsing again. I don't know what to do. I  cannot post anything to any of the eating disorder subreddits for someone reason so this is the closest place I could. I'm sorry:(",2.831016949152541,4.613252440677972,4.412000000000003,84.4478305084746,75.4406779661017,7.657853107344633,27.619209039548025,8.447377352677275,2.0583554802259894,690,28,136,13,15,231,118,177,0.10300000000000001,0.877,0.02,-0.9292,0,1,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,7,4,1,0,8,0,12,8,2,3,4,33,27,15,0,2,2,0,4,0,1,0,2,0,1,1,4,12,6,1,10,2,0,2,4,2,0,2,9,5,22,2,18,17,4,27,0,1,1,0,5,12,0,1,11,89,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861442259815252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139708842035493,0.0,0.11933408112487627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17679825110198533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16107774836027064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578179674858828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619848920787056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841168230967754,0.0,0.1483854192392065,0.0,0.0,0.12843927020641166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623467438108321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13670619604627834,0.0,0.14664676685746084,0.0,0.2784721643885313,0.0,0.0,0.12334874658240433,0.35070275938132894,0.0,0.11203737698576374,0.0,0.0757637758775926,0.0,0.08241473942787443,0.12163077654219225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532151438401456,0.0,0.0,0.14280947757471696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939169053826505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829979868848407,0.0,0.0,0.1372156554912319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660189969945616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154223924449489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826516949644354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150865757631465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13888322764123195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09289961561679848,0.14909843799484726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14676180553725154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23991398801739935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12286980421529227,0.0,0.0,0.16233118506384062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674853759537255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291904969860296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855329535441528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justmythoughtslol,2020/03/29,"My cousin scarred me (assault warning) First I want to say that what i am about to say happend a long time ago. I still from time to time remember it. I tried forgetting it or pretended to make something of it that isnt the truth. 

When I was around 10 years old a cousin of mine (girl) watched me and my sister when my mom was not home. I am a child of divorce and I have seen lots of abuse and violence in my younger years. On a particular night my little sister was already asleep. My cousin thought it would be funny to play a game. She would like me to undress myself and she would do that to. Then i have to lay on the couch while she jumps naked on me (in a sitting position). I realise now that she was using me for sexual pleasure. This happend 3 times and then it kinda stopped after I said that I dont feel comfortable and that I will tell mom id she doesnt stop. It was really weird, almost as if it didnt happen. I was ashamed and felt very dirty about it. I never told my mom or anyone. 

I feel that that experience ruined my innocence very early on. I wish it never happend. Today I am 17 years old and I have such a problem with creating normal relations with people. Boys literally scare me and I dont like love in any way. Eventhough I have desires and all that I still cant even bring myself to hold hands with someone. I dont know if its the divorce of my parents or the experience with my niece that resulted in me being the way I am. I hope someone has some type of advise. My cousin is now 25 or something like that she is married and has child. 

Sorry for grammer mistakes, english is not my first language",2.266105719595295,4.0229665149700615,3.6340594672723507,89.52164670658684,76.96407185628745,6.523064216394798,24.99029527152593,7.372421405659032,1.071880363411109,1272,45,271,16,29,417,164,334,0.107,0.7959999999999999,0.098,-0.6148,1,0,2,0,3,0,30.0,0,0,0,2,11,16,1,2,12,0,33,3,2,3,4,55,49,23,0,12,8,10,4,3,0,4,0,3,2,4,23,16,0,3,6,3,0,2,11,7,0,2,12,9,52,9,35,31,3,45,0,1,2,1,30,10,0,11,33,192,75,2,0.0,0.11661769668267805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872479482616802,0.0,0.09855856054970838,0.0,0.10861458984070173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693247056035315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882114661114566,0.0,0.0,0.08761924222747874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.346060594273068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500887691260522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925573470758154,0.0,0.0,0.09953341658202697,0.0,0.09450356983159164,0.0,0.0,0.16744074815356488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703702653209848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987284408376668,0.0977583726324866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054091883080787884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442566557453284,0.09864784781406856,0.0,0.08710315192580133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367753458483436,0.08883253191400535,0.0,0.06569954544820072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34582300432234464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518230718664204,0.0,0.0,0.0923653266896703,0.09643573987885412,0.0,0.0,0.20656125575296705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928947049673908,0.0,0.0,0.06823559941786624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417956668192416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305366520957532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149649714960176,0.0,0.09362484757588882,0.1565432441587083,0.09854073586616646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16679060398515128,0.15154496327323108,0.0,0.11017888640475904,0.0,0.0,0.15720488840303698,0.16457564898928098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602791090447476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813856722024297,0.2295699633414213,0.0,0.0932955244749988,0.0940494394937167,0.0,0.06682420948226221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500771958450029,0.0,0.16242209735927166,0.05805369786894957,0.1562505901477219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318405394069013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20975518718702985,0.0,0.0,0.1901476901157787
mentalhealth,throwaway94318,2020/03/29,"Is it normal to be hyper sexual for the rest of your life after being molested as a child multiple times? Hi, I was molested around a dozen times by different people growing up. First it was my teacher, then by my classmate multiple times. This happened very frequently. I remember after being molested as a child I started to look up porn and got very aroused and wet. I was freaked out by it but it turned me on, btw this happened before I was even a teenager. I’m just wondering is this normal to be hyper sexual after being molested as a child?",3.743228511530397,5.7611753773584935,5.590125786163522,75.96168763102727,73.52830188679245,9.239412997903564,29.70230607966457,9.725611199111238,3.2959425576519905,434,19,75,12,9,149,61,106,0.114,0.872,0.013000000000000001,-0.8523,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,3,5,4,0,6,0,11,3,1,0,0,10,19,7,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,7,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,2,5,2,9,0,19,9,1,16,0,0,1,2,5,5,0,1,10,61,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18567507868088115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748111029349814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21791543543852265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13776115872317132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17741293634498356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668156799824644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688825956184568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732198321630488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17514962781004062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4087164676263252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445989484576483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23627368092442194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476297494721889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648635270280056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268686165437184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441907843530581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261896039101404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dbdackillmememe,2020/03/29,"Corona anxiety / depression / loneliness Hey I have severe health anxiety and PTSD and the current state of the world has me terrified and crying literally all day every day. I find change extremely hard and isolation has made my mind go to very dark places. 

But my main concern is missing my boyfriend, he's my safe space and not knowing when ill next see him is killing me. Usual day to day life is difficult as it is and hes always able to help me but now i cant see him during this awful crisis, idk if i can cope. We call and play video games together but i need physical contact, i miss him already. 

I also live in a very unsupportive household, my family dont talk to me at all. I tried talking to my mum about how i feel, she just said other people have it worse. I cant cope with this intense feeling.",4.453821548821548,5.310338018518519,5.595611672278341,81.17570707070709,70.04938271604938,9.100785634118967,29.54208754208755,9.339509955726095,2.498140740740741,637,24,127,13,11,212,111,162,0.23199999999999998,0.7,0.068,-0.9773,1,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,0,6,7,1,0,3,1,13,3,0,2,2,26,24,15,1,2,6,1,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,9,0,1,4,3,0,1,4,5,0,0,2,6,26,2,11,22,3,16,0,3,2,0,16,5,0,1,9,77,31,0,0.14701096670974922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16223025742347555,0.1175646169641871,0.12232490110551203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249259742924947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15011463382210047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555181098203678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16148464382747624,0.3792396464558237,0.0,0.12662033020982727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17229575810327755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238630799839666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13858885577297028,0.0,0.14866632390752066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13436536024448986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354972025020778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13169295027528533,0.0,0.0,0.1562657830697363,0.0,0.0,0.09853835212736456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626458531775239,0.0,0.08079338263475475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383819341789538,0.0,0.0,0.12981337697047465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910533127723304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484391682610969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090067690460837,0.0,0.0,0.15634783089887294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191889390956688,0.0,0.15359517052242516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17184795300312816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984109451360588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23429741378729346,0.0,0.0,0.16608054737400646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363236927297021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998107963426216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619118102778536,0.2425988875389672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981673457548916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LilSugarT,2020/03/29,"Advice on getting socially back to work after a really bad week? Hey y’all, I’m wondering if anyone has tips for this. I had a really shitty 8 days prompted by having to shut in for coronavirus. I was basically doing nothing the entire time, I was in the metaphorical fetal position the entire time. Was able to eat and exercise, but not much else. 

I’ve got my days down to a reasonable schedule now and I’ve pulled myself out of it, but during that time I hardcore ghosted a client (I do some graphic design freelance work as a student, am new to the business etiquette side of things). I didn’t miss a deadline, but I should have had work delivered really on the first day of the episode. It’s like a one to two hour amount of work; I’m finishing it now.

But I have no idea how to email my client once I’ve finished it. “Hey, sorry for not existing for 8 days even though you know I have literally nothing to do” doesn’t seem to work. I don’t really think it’s professional to disclose mental health issues in the setting, and I don’t really want to anyway, but I also don’t consider myself a liar and I hate making excuses, so I really don’t know how to approach it. Anybody have some experience here?",4.177316480311134,5.202810421487605,5.9063928050559085,78.0713004375304,70.81818181818181,9.330481283422461,28.69810403500243,9.627879704456738,2.6672899368011667,950,35,183,22,17,327,134,242,0.09300000000000001,0.871,0.035,-0.9172,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,0,6,11,5,2,0,15,0,22,3,0,4,0,27,35,16,1,3,8,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,9,5,1,0,7,1,0,2,9,4,0,3,7,0,20,1,30,27,4,30,0,1,0,0,7,9,0,5,19,126,29,7,0.11859667991087808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589130302251782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484172207692892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292555610384257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119352631529916,0.0990232739389539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059401891359252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12135401124242605,0.09907230807195867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833198856920788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601030987150532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087827534705088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061961870355983814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948525989376219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708966826551252,0.0,0.12606272491448905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679384023028128,0.0,0.0,0.13388121598188826,0.0,0.12378412144218373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303552674157835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794034725476167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916420475882316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951755911335595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718220564338082,0.0,0.0,0.11454141248061507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22759342588926526,0.0,0.0,0.12630159352817014,0.08036417961381148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558564199547418,0.1219371391975292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796596321107277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208943799370663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13275927350703354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879036434583896,0.07599196376284137,0.11652063586420446,0.0,0.2074640333558067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585172350134178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995139454545865,0.0,0.09513110298305172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861304036768847,0.4316989772737992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RenderedBike40,2020/03/29,"Am I the only one who..? So I have this weird thing that makes me think I might have OCD, but don’t have many of the symptoms. 

Sometimes, if I like tap a door or something, I end up having to do it again, to a multiple of 3 or 5. 

Similarly, if I catch my teeth on a glass when I’m having a drink, I have to do it again. Otherwise I get a really uncomfortable feeling in my teeth.

It’s also like if I need to click my knuckles, and then there’s that one that doesn’t click, it feels soo uncomfortable for the next hour or so until it actually clicks. 


Can someone please explain this.",3.412621951219513,3.6908627317073166,5.084298780487806,85.99522865853659,72.08943089430895,8.426422764227643,25.944105691056908,8.472884824447931,1.4028544715447158,448,13,104,7,8,153,76,123,0.079,0.821,0.099,0.3261,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,8,0,13,4,2,1,0,15,21,14,0,4,7,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,12,1,1,0,4,1,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,5,13,2,11,20,0,12,0,0,3,0,2,3,0,7,10,75,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.2233642227725444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18304374244797034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22422566353502785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20272914691980626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314679450901821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195858994402866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22541114967609266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236487859561224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278626315134528,0.2320591582237027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24281677166664836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16971949106451711,0.0,0.0,0.2434277661966097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102044094758443,0.17408162722592851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251253161159073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466331893112182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939382756592956,0.17621117832679728,0.22637867135898346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23790499006298946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15206475423340918,0.14666386415715166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KendamiChan,2020/03/29,"Run or don't run? So I have thought about running away from home for about five years now, but the feeling has never been stronger. My parents always want me to have a ""good life"" and always guilt trip me into doing what they want me to do. I have developed anorexia and bulimia multiple times(and have gotten rid of it with help from friends) which has damaged me physically. Though I do not want to disappoint anyone, I kind of have the feeling that I am going to go insane or even go as far as attempting suicide for the fourth time. My parents also don't understand when I tell them that I do not want to live here anymore and they still are my family, so I cant just run away, can I?",5.659565217391304,5.534711586956526,6.01576086956522,82.65668478260872,67.18840579710144,9.218840579710145,31.74275362318841,8.841846274778883,2.3804318840579706,541,20,111,8,8,174,87,138,0.126,0.742,0.132,-0.7049,2,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,3,1,12,6,0,1,4,0,18,1,0,0,1,20,30,13,1,4,6,2,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,5,5,0,0,4,0,0,8,6,3,0,1,3,2,19,3,19,27,0,18,0,2,0,0,8,4,0,2,6,85,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344861552814874,0.2777041106189456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16549359470104855,0.11668177687646175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135661467866865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021832161217604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15731341119553868,0.0,0.16875243260615966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12892599212594982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845140344875394,0.13996550937411206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111851737430725,0.0,0.1673876485997975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737729901572912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11786763320790172,0.0,0.0,0.14735228915874088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287030707023103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3705863746647297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13326533061250662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18253243934999852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458547263389885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639522901526922,0.1324788573685611,0.0973052345069586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17372111772753912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3937050720687221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074610128047993
mentalhealth,kitkatkhi,2020/03/29,"Increasing paranoia & it’s starting to affect my life Ever since I was a young kid I can remember always feeling like I’m being watched. 

As a child I remember being convinced someone was somehow watching me through the mirror with a camera or something. 

Growing up I would always wonder if someone’s watching what I’m doing at that time (these thoughts came in the form of ghosts watching me, people from school stalking me, etc). This paranoia never seemed to leave, although it did reduce at one point. 

As I got into my late teens, the feeling of being watched turned a little scarier and I would be paranoid about being watched in the house. I would be terrified to be home alone and would lock myself in my room out of fear that someone would break in and assault me or kill me.

As of late, it’s starting to affect my sleep. I haven’t been able to sleep in my room alone and will often move to my parents or brothers room after hours of not being able to sleep out of fear. It’s kind of embarrassing & it makes me feel a little crazy vocalizing this here since I’ve never really openly talked about it before. 

I don’t want to talk to my psychiatrist about this because I’m embarrassed and don’t want her to think I’ve absolutely lost it. I do have some trauma in my past which may have made this worse, but it has definitely been happening since I was quite young. 

Has anybody else ever experienced this and do you have any helpful tips to overcome this irrational fear and paranoia?",7.678938869665513,6.976402730103808,7.398740484429066,76.33331257208769,63.22145328719725,9.644382929642443,35.1836216839677,8.648137234880735,2.8702274971164936,1195,46,219,14,15,379,149,289,0.141,0.797,0.062,-0.9641,1,2,1,0,0,1,24.0,0,1,0,2,8,12,2,5,9,0,33,4,3,4,4,47,54,16,2,8,6,2,3,1,0,7,1,0,4,2,19,13,0,0,9,0,0,4,6,9,0,1,11,10,28,3,40,28,4,38,0,1,6,0,9,19,0,10,15,154,47,1,0.18208614810330556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18858633512598244,0.0,0.0,0.15151026183914862,0.19729026539514244,0.0,0.06191241235516155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05549901291062559,0.0,0.07747095037870225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041290225634202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760548059780564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153709371734486,0.0,0.16470734558815392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307346309368091,0.1381023413364352,0.06504119029376709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281546326220165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050908970950714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102425343118671,0.0,0.09132362647232826,0.0,0.08965908871018137,0.1050514837784994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072567228451232,0.09480735153909817,0.0,0.0,0.20540110617488389,0.09640146983856904,0.0,0.0,0.06430641566625624,0.0444790472183353,0.18249815614699788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993842701090266,0.0,0.0,0.08614715799711119,0.06077195889053433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967643794772628,0.0,0.0,0.14043606267223302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169314319067595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109255951295144,0.0,0.08691091592086116,0.06311780415532693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606513270097292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683551596743084,0.0,0.0,0.05832452452863611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20626811022783847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921404514980203,0.0,0.08288219527789764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225935315006085,0.0,0.27332647281273115,0.0,0.2314215035940693,0.07008940636712238,0.0,0.0,0.12888151281978066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14635394854473446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05833672569409164,0.0,0.0722780311869556,0.05308794862852589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902872089135843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739912784075203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873233017149287,0.0,0.0,0.09278067048605107,0.3233719382644427,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,needhelpthankz,2020/03/29,"I need scientific answers with germophobia [NSFW] This story is a bit disgusting.

I'll just get straight to it. There is a sock I ejaculated into in one of my drawers in my room and it has been there for years. I developed germophobia a few years ago and have avoided opening it because I don't want to touch anything that the sock has touched in that drawer and I don't want the dust that has touched the sock to come out. Well my germophobia has come back recently and I realised my parents had been opening and closing that drawer for years (don't worry they didn't touch the sock, they just throw socks and underwear in there and close it without putting their hands in the drawer) and now I'm afraid to go in my room, touch anything that my parents have touched around the house (because they might have put their hands in the drawer while placing clothing in there and their hand might of touched the sock), and I think the dust has exited the drawer and gone all over my room and around the house so I can't touch anything in the house without washing my hands after and keeping my hands in my pockets, I feel like the dry cum flakes and dust are everywhere basically even on my clothes and in my gaming PC where the fans take air in and there is dust under my keyboard and literally everything in this house disgusts me now.

Now I'm posting this here because I'm going insane in this house and it's destroying my life and I can't go to therapy because I need scientific answers to satisfy me. Is there any scientific answers to help me stop my fear of this? I feel trapped in my life and can't escape.

Sorry if this sounds stupid but this is destroying my life.",7.990274390243902,6.6876246737804905,7.550731707317072,77.4403048780488,62.9329268292683,10.639024390243904,37.26829268292683,9.516144504307137,3.275374390243903,1335,55,264,20,16,421,137,328,0.083,0.875,0.042,-0.9015,2,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,6,0,19,10,5,3,17,0,26,9,5,0,1,53,45,24,0,5,6,2,15,1,0,2,4,1,3,0,17,31,0,3,6,1,0,9,9,8,1,1,5,16,38,2,38,38,3,56,0,0,0,0,10,34,0,3,13,179,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789126748742572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067425994431069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447781636003835,0.1765305983485961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624090198133787,0.0,0.2417658103176589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082470746895854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17081939727482526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654882172431832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08911041237526636,0.0,0.0,0.11157229897070256,0.10026732221267064,0.07083340428378622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051802239427146665,0.0,0.16904918008836886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645874091301351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5720339824259909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812985262679879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21009958389548306,0.04844010879173416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103668175207124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470382336500746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671871983496193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22019062399446349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359156026930602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949591295754545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993480282948941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789952654454584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11099128597755843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289457044794821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454911786094459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338766564246648,0.0,0.0,0.06353187660032601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696350893503026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08914854337664661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19115580889214773,0.0,0.0,0.10069252556849577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915497364357185
mentalhealth,That-Expression,2020/03/29,"Middleground? Never heard of her After looking for the right subreddit to post this in, I think I might be right here? 

Anyway

Being in quarantine and having to work from home gave me the time to question myself and my behaviour (more so than ever) and I've found something rather strange.

There is no middleground in my life EVER. I am either completely obsessed or apathetic towards something or someone. 

I can read a whole set of books in a matter of days but won't touch another one for months. 

I bombard people with messages one day and ghost the same people the next day. 

I either work out so much I hurt myself or throw up or I slum it on the sofa and don't even move the whole day. 

Is anyone else like this? I feel this isn't particularly healthy nor normal because I can't seem to keep (any) relationships alive bc I either smother people or I don't give a fuck

TL;DR: there's never a middleground with me, I either go in and give 150% or I don't care at all",2.6002820955670707,4.745905715025909,3.9989205526770313,85.48976827864135,77.34196891191709,6.568681635002879,23.157455382843985,7.594959193182576,1.108947265400115,765,24,149,11,18,252,117,193,0.132,0.8079999999999999,0.06,-0.9121,0,1,2,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,0,2,10,6,2,1,10,0,14,2,0,0,5,36,27,16,1,2,12,0,2,1,0,2,1,1,2,0,4,9,0,1,5,2,0,3,10,4,0,2,3,4,21,2,24,20,10,29,0,1,1,1,8,12,1,9,13,112,25,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08746024281122157,0.134860390921705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992816405499376,0.13177769924053248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784003879077047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13112801455066067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484673014029916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33177515849491457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743842058104863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494669496077348,0.2326729631417887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06502984806339274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141015891640373,0.0,0.1188992763727644,0.0,0.24675177537864604,0.0730928897789895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290078393303835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768129048905095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431582692542855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084211896358496,0.06283309148755982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800128384496516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13643649674751815,0.0,0.0,0.10265648698763616,0.1366936903703614,0.0945442642791136,0.0,0.1983862633280425,0.0,0.1367798089191925,0.0,0.1260119812532419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743009867647048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26748909954285466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231742831513153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440743347735119,0.0,0.12864632253626088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13808063927973355,0.0,0.2196670680404985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708309607043893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897212220799476,0.1980228605597808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240906790626007,0.0,0.0,0.07499441066462409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871803346963154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18726143434980147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Atotalloserrrrrrr,2020/03/29,"Am I traumatized? I'm a 16 year old girl and made this account so no one figures out who I am. I'm looking for help.

I've been thinking about it lately and I've been noticing some weird behaviors in myself, that weren't there before. I just watched a youtube video about trauma and found some weird similarities. 
Before talking about these behaviors, I should talk about what I think traumatized me, IF I am even traumatized.
People have tried to break into my house about 6 times over about 5 years (I say about, bc the events are foggy in my mind). This has completely shattered my sense of security and I don't feel safe anywhere. I live with my little sister and mom. I know that if someone manages to get in, I will be the only one who can protect my family.

So now I'll list some weird things that I've noticed in myself:
• seeing these events and possible outcomes in my dreams often
• sleep paralysis and repeated false awakenings (nested dreams I think)
• overall nightmares
• really realistic dreams and getting confused about what has and hasn't actually happened
• not remembering when and what exactly happened during these attempted break ins, overall the experiences are really foggy
• thinking of ways to protect myself the next time this happens
• hiding weapons around the house
• mood swings
• feeling really tired
• feeling unsafe everywhere
• this really uncomfortable feeling of danger randomly
• carrying a knife with me everywhere I go
• crying for no reason (not as common)
• forgetting events that have happened
• getting easily startled by signs that hint at someone trying to break in (outside lights turning on, dogs making noise, overall sounds, ect)

I'm sure I'm forgetting something, but these are some of the things that I've experienced.
At this point it's not a question of IF someone breaks in, it's a question of WHEN, I am completely convinced in that. The dreams of these break ins have gradually gotten worse and now, I'm convinced that I will be able to kill the next person who tries, to just feel safe again. I don't think I want to kill someone, but I really don't know anymore. I'm not a psychopath, I feel compassion, but that feeling has also gotten weaker recently.

I was diagnosed with depression about 2 years ago, but have been better since December. I'm finally happy again after so, so long, but now these problems have come into my life. I'm still seeing my therapist once a month and stopped self harming a year ago.
I don't really want to talk to my therapist about this, bc I think I'm just overreacting. And with quarantine I can finally focus on my hobbies, so being put into the hospital again would really suck. But I know that if something is wrong, then just pretending it doesn't exist will only make things worse. But the problem is that I don't know if something is wrong.

So what do you guys think? Am I overreacting, or is something wrong? I just really need some closure and thought people here would know better

Edit: I'm not a native english speaker, so sorry if I got some terms wrong",5.052378926195267,7.211478741992884,5.4890174841404935,77.46957914281296,70.29893238434164,8.588024137397495,30.01098561039765,9.20300075937882,2.8745627727061738,2431,100,411,52,46,777,249,562,0.18600000000000005,0.7340000000000001,0.079,-0.9963,0,1,4,0,0,0,59.0,0,1,0,3,37,29,5,2,19,0,44,4,1,4,2,103,98,40,2,14,24,2,7,0,0,6,3,3,0,4,37,24,0,6,26,6,1,3,15,19,0,2,11,16,44,9,55,78,7,66,0,1,4,0,17,22,1,18,35,269,81,2,0.06219236386592247,0.0,0.060690775776797413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102595561892619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049735210914096016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616781133683055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05536438938750578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058422419317158,0.0,0.0,0.11000818366113373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05357321458225081,0.13041502050836204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831539137829007,0.0,0.0,0.053566191866355535,0.06312394018493653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041077469783288696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060836065639855226,0.0586294256741516,0.0,0.2201242948944135,0.0,0.0,0.13625738935277718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819071690188559,0.0,0.0,0.09747882967436257,0.0,0.035345353608591465,0.0,0.04974091476414009,0.0,0.0,0.061580218096781415,0.21998600789279768,0.06620492779758141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04168623054056173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352327558932818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376132721046743,0.0,0.17089648354941905,0.0,0.07015569534945558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04392830584520956,0.0,0.06233308711387905,0.05491699671053535,0.05503828494178367,0.052225922100284004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058847918438384376,0.08302777162424645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279655845455243,0.0728389449003734,0.04964135148801789,0.0,0.0,0.046114849770000375,0.0,0.0,0.13228456905678704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161283693912996,0.06526042399561456,0.06623283777802713,0.08428631061315361,0.09460019043056446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623270871146214,0.05430397325642103,0.0,0.0,0.058791886201810875,0.07011254568444447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190193859149666,0.0,0.06252050333141472,0.13933936184189988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31873616655201303,0.06394410817774322,0.061407456374916874,0.0,0.07045182458331685,0.0,0.0,0.049457863964886224,0.0,0.0,0.09911852385729278,0.0,0.06488019916272368,0.0,0.0,0.05144616606804613,0.0,0.06223727844732175,0.0,0.2107815523269884,0.19151488059190572,0.0,0.06961925958407568,0.0,0.0,0.04966690212047716,0.05199560098162135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586155669272382,0.0,0.0,0.1499635988116668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14442025584872434,0.12395352919341453,0.2789524888338625,0.0,0.04937378995508589,0.07252973501592226,0.07148097339756393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667359795293726,0.06764743289926771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07336533511341292,0.04936540362051346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675866404333014,0.08835934180851945,0.27199034706617675,0.0,0.16019937309163654
mentalhealth,wyle_e,2020/03/29,"What's the point? Lately I am feeling hopelessness. Five years ago I was on top of the world. Happy relationships, good income, security. Slowly that all unravelled (no, no drug or addiction issues or anything like that). My relationships are broken, my job sucks, the area I am in is going to be looking at 25-30% unemployment for years. The world is just starting a depression that hasn't been seen since the 30's. I am feeling like I just want to pack up and move to a dessert island. Every time I think I am making a little progress forward something else even bigger knocks me back (a pandemic? Really?! The universe is really pulling out all the stops now). I don't remember ever a time in my life where I saw the future as this dark.",2.5413615023474208,5.090071915492961,4.056929577464788,82.83760093896716,79.84507042253522,7.166948356807513,24.255399061032854,8.238735603445708,1.7740942723004698,580,21,108,12,15,192,97,142,0.134,0.711,0.156,-0.3237,4,0,2,0,0,1,24.0,0,0,0,2,7,8,1,0,13,0,13,4,0,1,3,16,24,4,0,1,4,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,2,1,2,4,0,0,4,4,3,0,1,4,5,13,5,12,19,2,30,0,2,3,0,2,15,1,2,15,71,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857261511624734,0.0,0.0,0.15102085817881727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401982600666349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100239392037435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673761703053248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975726682356108,0.0,0.1423205138900965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252638688003087,0.15410751341830475,0.14354229818221462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17228625187383814,0.1217108571587608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682400000668767,0.14289650601930426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18135979061071367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778198178474859,0.16906384610326022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921824045730792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033588155746977,0.16646629430050172,0.1707533865402911,0.0,0.0,0.14306612229105048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137218918407882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18107410881350175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16105272712885352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21828407019290794,0.0,0.0,0.3658227184332072,0.1929936121014824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14093008203787666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115752783984128,0.0,0.0,0.12058727189927007,0.0,0.0,0.14243518753674345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916486700188532,0.0,0.0,0.19868577752634828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048739766724347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21942267536864676
mentalhealth,SHandvalkyries,2020/03/29,"Weird experience. I need help understanding what happened. I've recently picked up interest in understanding dissociative identity disorder. To preface, it's just a subject that I'd like to learn more, not looking to diagnose.

The first time I deep dived into reading and watching content about it, I experienced some weird symptoms later on at night? I don't know what's the right name for it.

It felt like someone detached me from a physical conversation I was having at that time. I also found it really hard to build thoughts and reply. It's like a plugged pulled from my mind. It blanked out and I was miles away. It took me a while to recover but I was fine after that, just a bit shaken and jumbled. I felt so weird after that because the only time I 'blanked out' was once many years ago in a stress induced situation. There wasn't stress that night, I was relaxed and chatting.

I took a break from reading DID related content and tonight I went back into it again unknowingly. My mind felt like disconnecting from the world again and it took some effort to keep it focused on what I'm doing instead of letting it space out again.

For some bg context, I've never been professionally diagnosed at all, just have the rare panic attacks and some anxiety. 

Don't know what to feel about this. I'm really confused as to whats causing this trigger. Is it some mirroring neurons firing off? It's baffled me and I'm hoping someone can help me make sense of it.

TL;DR Reading up on DID triggers some weird blanking out experience for me. Only mental health issue I suffer from are panic attacks and mild anxiety. I don't understand what's going on.",4.721826923076924,6.685867375000001,5.577841025641029,77.30049230769231,70.76282051282051,8.325333333333333,32.031282051282055,8.954980946260402,2.9388995897435897,1319,61,231,26,25,431,161,312,0.161,0.7490000000000001,0.091,-0.9678,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,2,13,20,2,5,12,0,19,5,1,6,2,55,44,15,0,2,5,0,6,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,28,16,0,1,13,5,0,6,6,12,0,1,18,9,22,8,42,25,9,50,0,1,2,0,5,24,0,9,23,157,50,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227352811953995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422288670649728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420040785940376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111774088798749,0.08720129652837016,0.07136781812730245,0.0,0.056578220914719986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013282547621204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534498528183318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884074069337608,0.0,0.0,0.10637226080558228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18157873766556148,0.0,0.0,0.04692927175453087,0.0,0.26734641667274306,0.0,0.0,0.0789470777023395,0.0,0.10176516319163732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052748025559252856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207463204008468,0.0,0.08314262556823929,0.0,0.0,0.09865636287846953,0.0,0.0,0.12442180538762385,0.0,0.0,0.09218470325028663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687313368703024,0.0,0.08249686363095378,0.0,0.0,0.10201569555167816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490804639384118,0.0,0.18137586437062053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793992682341452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06195370215081136,0.09409827607157296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935341330296832,0.0,0.18743026351212952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06882000110299706,0.0715834585297807,0.0,0.0,0.17419828097002266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884330083850157,0.0,0.1411776302480867,0.0,0.21779318414156734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785157159512317,0.0,0.11891735223620148,0.0,0.09164209005410773,0.0,0.0,0.07926218374018251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432621253866656,0.0,0.0,0.15728107904486247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21263499902660973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964687177403776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368351618004478,0.1623608165924146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30935749181327155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898662407680974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603900296266133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05976882223325618
mentalhealth,Natural-Born-Loser,2020/03/29,"I wrote sad stuff. I write when I’m depressed, or having a mental breakdown. So here are some of the things that i wrote. Btw all of this in the notes app titled “things to tell my therapist”


Saturday, January 25, 11:07 PM 2020

I’ve had this feeling of dread deep down in my chest since I could remember. It grows with each passing day, I feel like it’s killing me from the inside out. I feel like my organs are rotting within me. I can’t sleep because I can’t stop thinking about it. I don’t know what it is, it’s just a feeling, like there’s this heavy thing on my chest all the time. I’m in pain even if it doesn’t seem like it, and I try to hide it with laughter. I’m trying to get better, but every time it seems like I’m making progress I fall.

Ps, pizza rolls are fire bro


Wednesday, February 5, 12:09 AM

I saw this thing on tv where this girl was talking about her feelings. she was talking about how everything that used to matter to her don’t matter to her anymore, And I started crying, she like perfectly explained the way I feel. The things I used to love do not matter to me anymore, and I find it hard for me to care for anything, and it makes me feel bad. Like I’m a terrible person for it. Everything just feels like it hurts but like in a way I can’t feel it. Like all my emotions are dull and I can no longer feel them like the way I used to. I’m like distant from myself like I don’t know who I am anymore, and I guess that hurts a lot.


Depressed

My brother came up into my moms room, that I’m sleeping in at the time and jumped into bed, and fell asleep, and he like took up the entire bed and I can’t sleep in there now.  that made me really depressed, like it’s unfair, and I told him to get out but he wouldn’t. I have to sleep in my sisters room now but I don’t like it in here, and it’s hard for me to sleep without a tv on to block the noise of silence out. I’ve cried. I know it’s a small thing but it upsets me because this has happened before, a lot when I was a kid. Theres been a lot of times when I had nowhere to sleep, and it just seems unfair to me because my bed was just taken away from me. it hurts a lot for some reason. I just want to rest and lie down for a while and sleep, but I can’t because someone else is sleeping in my bed. That’s kind of a symbolism for my entire life. Someone taking what they want from me, and never giving back, and it hurts a lot. Like so much has been stolen from me, and it’s all just really unfair. It makes me so sad, I’ve done nothing to deserve all of this, I’m still just a some girl, and I just wanna be free from a lot of this. I wish I could be normal and have friends and go places, but my ability to be normal feels like it’s been stolen from me. I feel like it’s partially my fault for not speaking up, and telling people how I feel when they’re doing it to me. My heart hurts.


Scared

I’m really fucking scared, and not in the way that I find fascinating and fun, in the way where it terrifies me. I’m scared that I’m like my parents, like I’m a lazy unfeeling and unstable person. And I don’t know if I’m even feeling these things. I’m confused, and I don’t want to have things wrong with me. I’m scared that I’m sick in the head and I’m going to do something really stupid, like hurt someone someday. I don’t want to hurt anyone, and I’m scared that I’m like my dad. My dad is someone to get a kick out of hurting someone. I’m terrified of growing up and becoming someone like him. I want to be successful, and work, and make art. And I’m the only person standing in the way of doing that. But sometimes I feel so dull and emotionless, I don’t care when I should care. It hurts, I feel like there’s something seriously wrong with me, and it may be my fault. And I have no excuse for it. When I tell someone that I’m not close to “I love you” I feel like I’m lying to them, because I should love them. But I don’t, And it makes me feel so self centered. I feel guilty because I SHOULD feel more connected to others, but I I’m not. I’m not even connected to myself. My mind is always racing. And I know I feel things, and I have emotions, and I feel them strongly at times, but sometimes I don’t feel them at all. Should I?



OKAY IM SORRY FOR THE BAD GRAMMAR, but I really wanted to share this in case anyone else is going through the same thing. If so you’re not alone because I’m just as dull and unfeeling as you are my friend.",1.4007983193277305,2.7864535756302584,3.0077226890756315,94.69389495798323,78.36974789915966,5.978487394957982,21.56386554621849,6.568628728619664,0.17871361344537862,3412,92,809,29,80,1126,295,952,0.201,0.629,0.17,-0.9939,1,1,2,0,0,0,107.0,0,2,6,6,41,80,3,8,35,1,64,21,13,12,8,182,164,74,1,20,33,7,26,26,2,6,3,1,6,7,69,54,1,2,37,3,1,11,28,37,0,0,18,28,117,44,104,133,20,83,0,17,1,4,51,43,1,19,48,515,186,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034625104881912984,0.0,0.0,0.02781780929865392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946563442540024,0.04675237122768123,0.03425467415667195,0.027511397752050533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03141013380891123,0.02570687370799931,0.05582805929666622,0.14265735628326634,0.036922628636986865,0.02844787010015413,0.0,0.0,0.029567575871690517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0382368990319571,0.10225737974933403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05338490115768737,0.0,0.07344619102171285,0.021560647235875148,0.0,0.08638388833205883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03421218313554476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05585570411566746,0.07521220847119328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662438646296951,0.0,0.028167605344441512,0.0,0.06009241909439731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3887930520890254,0.23883576019033306,0.0,0.0,0.06111184123340735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0516584166450542,0.030907019875790868,0.05239996873611882,0.03207068309694703,0.05699992799188379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036828729401464665,0.0,0.029563495926433744,0.0,0.05989637994597855,0.0,0.034310515889993336,0.0,0.0,0.03961666386017042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221034358103073,0.0,0.03611191675150573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036987165213455866,0.03481391680287648,0.09186579716864823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023613761681476598,0.42465837753083385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705343496715472,0.09052010276589494,0.03163383369146072,0.11157942324179268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03369123798758,0.0,0.03375643419957712,0.03915474209427521,0.0,0.0,0.02457610798282313,0.0,0.02578454794182501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551183367965158,0.03207856792310865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02542627480013844,0.035573630590171185,0.0,0.03712188874743889,0.0,0.0,0.023177295293789674,0.08757367657334161,0.03492895660795693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070858489106667,0.03437330218844418,0.0,0.0,0.037871540086198426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16735455928591672,0.0,0.0,0.09130475023304097,0.034876500047004835,0.0,0.0,0.027655004707835527,0.0,0.2676463355791397,0.0,0.1982856880895843,0.05147463192285712,0.06612950945585397,0.037423992859002914,0.02366309253394941,0.0,0.026698557287022487,0.027950354707317986,0.0,0.0,0.03827123852091125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025136438684358137,0.05374218460588079,0.08766220176350245,0.0,0.0,0.038816720084841966,0.22210501419177286,0.02142165013468165,0.0,0.0,0.09747131402709266,0.0,0.0,0.03194537235633243,0.03714379105010476,0.04539578897694641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662262964802611,0.0,0.0,0.11831311308619866,0.15921891645614125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03844474531053554,0.03222691567148391,0.0,0.024338637921030176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731045178240491,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chutzpahhh,2020/03/29,"Incredible story about the founder of PsypherLA, a queer Vietnamese American man who leverages urban dance to engage Asian American youth in discussions about mental health. Episode 41 of bamboo&glass episode is called ""How Dance Saved His Life"" and shares the story of Matt Diep, a queer Vietnamese American dancer who founded a urban dance + mental health nonprofit called Psypher LA.

He shares his experience:

* growing up in a Catholic family, fearful that being queer makes him less ""masculine""
* turning to substances to participate in ""masculinity""
* finding a safe space for healing and self-expression through urban dance
* creating and running a nonprofit ([https://www.psypherla.org](https://www.psypherla.org/)) that leverages urban dance to engage Asian American youth in discussions about mental health.

A truly incredible story about the trap of toxic masculinity and how urban dance was LITERALLY a life-saving avenue for self-expression and solidarity.

Hope you enjoy!

bamboo & glass is available wherever you listen to podcasts, including:

[Spotify](https://open.spotify.com/episode/6nlPPAGbWMjbyR0onJe7tj)  
[Apple Podcasts](https://open.spotify.com/episode/6nlPPAGbWMjbyR0onJe7tj)  
[Google Podcasts](https://podcasts.google.com/?feed=aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5idXp6c3Byb3V0LmNvbS8yNDEwOTQucnNz&episode=QnV6enNwcm91dC0zMTU2MTM2&ved=0CAcQ38oDahcKEwiwnePyu8DoAhUAAAAAHQAAAAAQAQ)  
[bamboo & glass website](http://bambooandglass.buzzsprout.com/241094/3156136-41-how-dance-saved-his-life-ft-matt-diep)

Learn about other episodes: [https://www.instagram.com/bambooandglass](https://www.instagram.com/bambooandglass)",19.220220713073,25.813127677419352,10.749400113186192,35.43094227504247,43.73118279569893,11.227617430673464,39.35936615732881,10.771109862388434,6.147498924731183,1412,55,113,34,19,355,106,186,0.03,0.8029999999999999,0.16699999999999998,0.9674,0,0,0,0,0,0,125.0,0,2,0,1,7,9,0,1,11,0,4,8,0,4,0,15,9,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,5,5,0,1,3,6,0,8,0,1,0,0,2,1,5,8,22,6,1,16,0,0,0,3,16,6,3,1,2,55,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6501346710996438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24507999800275698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738933172528195,0.1131313970904928,0.13504061564957678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968371764269384,0.0,0.0,0.13158087398959034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3826837213753897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191934788067094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25429230569512645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010523464246179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36281481557872736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503857914482142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305325526470845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hunniieb33,2020/03/29,"I’m basing whether I live or die on movies A couple days ago I was seriously considering cutting my wrists and had been planning on doing it on that day for a couple weeks. Then I watched a good movie and played Minecraft with my friend and I decided not to do it. Ever since then I’ve been watching movies everyday and made a stupid plan that if I like them then I decide I want to live another day and if i don’t then, you know. I find this so stupid and I’m genuinely embarrassed to post this but I needed to vent and know if I’m the only one who does this. I don’t know whether I’m too scared to do anything and that’s why I’ve been watching movies, like ones that were my favorites and I know I like or about a topic I enjoy. I don’t know if I’m going stir crazy or something else. I just want to know whether I really am alone in this weird situation or it’s something else. 

(I do have a therapist but I don’t know how to talk to her/approach her over text even though she says I can. I also haven’t set up any online appointments because I feel embarrassed for some reason)",2.090588100686496,3.561607230434785,3.547574370709384,91.18902745995425,76.69565217391305,6.9290617848970255,23.40961098398169,7.669130373188453,0.8665652173913041,853,26,194,12,19,281,118,230,0.121,0.7659999999999999,0.113,-0.1944,0,1,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,2,9,15,3,3,7,0,18,1,1,3,1,44,36,30,1,7,15,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,12,10,0,0,12,1,0,1,6,8,0,2,7,5,29,7,18,29,1,20,0,0,3,0,8,6,0,9,14,122,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11403491090235635,0.0,0.0,0.1332361145767239,0.0,0.10287634997484578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748215251930183,0.13489417486400507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586283436711763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842002802711466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846836962221104,0.0,0.2488937037387548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13351188874504835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257700113470843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149306700643704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496797499875587,0.11636562507962896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650461387223456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11757804501008308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938983206615376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311120031445481,0.10790026310719912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4948946345890465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885464955078546,0.0,0.22718955320884165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172581439365247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953877009221933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17434465098990432,0.09783935887224232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12320513960105857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241247201223824,0.132267187186261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230266301771908,0.12879482278537793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641542858683878,0.14460095031225045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19807246736315368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339896283596443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14936529383390254,0.0,0.0,0.12639181841019587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517548182149193,0.0,0.10319024612437143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160809633594691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,danahar01,2020/03/29,"my best friend is not well help! So basically, I'm 18 and last year my very innocent very good best friend started working at a restaurant where she mentioned a creepy cook who made comments about her ass(this is when she was 17 still) she turned 18 in the summer and I moved away to Italy for a while while she stayed in our home city. I was very nervously video chatted by her and our other bestie one day in October where she told me she had been seeing this guy and he had taken her to a motel room to smoke weed but then he ended up taking her virginity. My brother had also worked with this guy and did not like him at all, he remembers him saying shit about her to him and he was like ""dude she's a kid"". Basically this guy is 30 or 31 now, has 3 children with 2 different women, has been to prison, and before they started dating, mentioned escorting to her on multiple occasions. When i found out about this i absolutely freaked out and screamed and cried at her. She didn't take this well and decided to lie to me and continue seeing him. I've been home for about a month and knew she was acting weird so I spoke to my other friend about it who reluctantly told me it had never stopped and they saw each other a few times a week at his place for sex and they did go out sometimes. When I spoke to her a few months ago, she told me she was ending it and downplayed what had happened, she doesn't know I know yet and doesn't want to tell. me because she thinks ill tell her mom. She also thinks I am the unstable one because I have had mental health issues in the past, so she's using them as reasoning for me being so insane about this.  I need help because she thinks this is ok, I believe this is going to be a disaster in the end. My problem now is my other friend says that I just have to be there for her because its all gonna come crashing down soon but I'm having a lot of trouble doing that. I don't know why but  I don't feel like I will be able to just go along pretending I think everything is ok when I feel like I could get a call one day saying that she's dead missing(might be a little dramatic) I don't know how to handle this it's making me insane because I am so disgusted and so against it. I just want to make her understand but I can't. If anyone has any advice please let me know. Also, am I just being crazy or is this really not normal??",3.0151730388925517,4.190890408536589,4.1540760272467585,88.96385299934082,73.77642276422766,7.270138431114041,23.663150955833878,7.730073105063049,0.9382471324983516,1859,51,406,24,37,607,228,492,0.17300000000000001,0.7609999999999999,0.065,-0.9956,1,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,2,0,4,4,34,23,2,1,17,2,50,6,1,6,3,72,94,42,1,7,14,2,2,4,4,2,2,6,3,6,26,25,1,1,17,5,0,6,11,8,2,3,27,11,76,15,50,57,8,60,0,0,3,2,74,21,1,4,36,289,102,2,0.07753415427885524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576547821471752,0.06872934962503165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18601210549344646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05272588366906153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542136834306561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284589021327027,0.0,0.0,0.2363205040119417,0.0,0.06597585463100689,0.08735444099700017,0.16273462287694826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917104035684668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678880856803142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061904713180112036,0.0,0.08516762775191801,0.10000623053863088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810066889178754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060167420045096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696826984347067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840719608812396,0.11078083061774148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501219821865533,0.23961078105623215,0.0,0.040508395506496986,0.0,0.13219333995587987,0.0650319700260699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303130079153127,0.06856319656831494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241518033791402,0.0,0.0,0.10393901852657617,0.0,0.15554615698043878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092551306143697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21305371749175211,0.06320068408298744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928392584979993,0.0,0.15151708551696427,0.07770959154059383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591676532028748,0.0,0.07336469147607479,0.10350930008742157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813619128537823,0.08225148506906435,0.0,0.09080706441050823,0.12377404445280513,0.08240653564521846,0.0,0.057490592966069565,0.05979911960884755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596700913359374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15761744861711008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401512343159215,0.0,0.0,0.0810066889178754,0.08510921832863345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418971442860718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0496703646065217,0.07971802389382318,0.0,0.0,0.08783108241786579,0.0,0.0,0.18497481442688585,0.0,0.0,0.12356936515890612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958769517150907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668326112497924,0.0,0.10975814692935146,0.08264109221377204,0.061918875762043836,0.06482202472673339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659206954628533,0.0,0.13553653659180853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987230214798244,0.0,0.0,0.045210788873152566,0.0,0.0,0.22226162119989665,0.0,0.0,0.08433489536251981,0.0,0.0807157889931007,0.0,0.0669646151749776,0.0,0.19192139194073007,0.09146330606867503,0.0,0.062193221774406976,0.0,0.13942503234857612,0.0,0.06996251457042689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11289157548465455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04992945329848094
mentalhealth,Mister-E-69,2020/03/29,Nothing I just want to feel nothing,1.5828571428571436,4.33182442857143,2.3114285714285714,90.95857142857143,90.42857142857142,2.8000000000000003,35.57142857142857,3.1291,1.6654000000000004,29,2,5,0,1,9,6,7,0.196,0.804,0.0,-0.0572,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442251341134901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9269251482514048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2848927050774713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,C6ugbXAvXLxd,2020/03/29,"Is this symptom typical of somebody with a cluster B personality disorder? 
The symptom is a sort of lack of sentience or consciousness. I know it's typical of somebody with e.g. NPD to have little to no insight, but I'm talking a step further: not only not thinking about one's actions or how those actions affect those around them, but a lack of thought about almost... anything? Being sort of completely removed from almost every situation, yet still acting ""normal"", just being as agreeable and shallow as possible, meaning one can put on an (extremely convincing) facade that nothing is wrong with them and that they function in social society, yet never really having to be a unique person who thinks for themselves. That last part is really important. I am talking about somebody I know, and what's defining about them is that they're always sort of ""escaping"" their own thoughts, keeping busy and preoccupied rather than thinking about their life, being their own person, etc.

I'm struggling to articulate what I mean exactly but will answer any questions for clarification, thanks in advance for any help.",14.29504071058475,10.514610968911915,12.587727609178385,53.92253886010364,53.30051813471502,14.966395262768323,51.92376017764619,12.540900571622839,6.6466008882309415,899,47,127,19,7,285,121,193,0.062,0.8490000000000001,0.08900000000000001,0.8038,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,7,1,12,4,0,1,7,0,14,3,0,2,2,44,27,12,0,4,9,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,11,8,0,1,14,0,0,7,4,2,0,2,2,0,11,2,30,20,6,18,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,8,5,100,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26061670505892026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828020881951547,0.0,0.0,0.17698837971659104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708750863616458,0.11584502696530342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364408759367736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14914249123635506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513152544496447,0.0,0.0,0.10964178220854416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722470444409948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11566725824878407,0.0,0.0,0.1430342352842835,0.10607490946037652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191604624337853,0.0,0.13042640291753135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28350369070150383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036578385749163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750168345077584,0.1248651177399974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17636155719962154,0.09897121355974636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409202228828482,0.0,0.0,0.3408786035107729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14670422333337416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081855456978192,0.14577756847387732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16673172149789903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462737665011032,0.0,0.13265313728605166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10392354506357483,0.0,0.0,0.13604217103476704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.270513849780311,0.0,0.20919026761116336,0.0,0.11980801773553006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250149901267118,0.0,0.20662046821081467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422788611902136,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Goingwiththebeat,2020/03/29,"I’m completely useless and can’t do any better Keep thinking to myself, once this disaster is over I’ll get on track. But who am I fucking kidding? I’m a useless piece of trash. No where wants an idiot like me. 
It’s just an endless line of disappointment and disgust. I’m a terrible excuse of a person and a fucking failure. 

Damn I feel so bad for my boyfriend, he must feel so disappointed and embarrassed to be with me. I try my best for him but who need a waste of air, effort and any other resource. I’m sorry for being so crap but it’s the best I can be. 

Fuck maybe one day I won’t be coward enough to free him from being stuck with me. It’s the least I can do...",0.8044155844155831,2.68381558041958,3.0816833166833177,91.1612062937063,82.006993006993,5.764035964035964,22.1023976023976,6.868970318607317,0.5340173826173826,520,17,116,6,14,178,88,143,0.301,0.584,0.11599999999999999,-0.9785,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,4,5,19,7,1,9,0,14,4,1,0,1,18,29,11,0,3,4,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,7,7,0,1,3,0,1,0,3,14,0,1,1,2,14,6,15,21,5,5,0,4,0,3,8,4,5,0,2,79,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26310815241605057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16152444074585412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4060321324154557,0.1710926805285031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20283086855326973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476061431357477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19988775426611613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19563041018290506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5365301065576782,0.1010707489129008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719491339578321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945109348001914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19434865753113464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14344229668626232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20602019554033932,0.13108816394136485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16891493048206316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21655381158442866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239563080447049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13134129180012424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410307328672395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,boxy_rodent,2020/03/29,"Paranoia ruining my life So for the past few years I’ve had insomnia but recently it’s only gotten worse. For weeks, I can’t fall asleep because my thoughts are constantly racing and I always feel like someone or something is watching me. I see things like shadows crawling and moving around the room and I always feel like there’s something in the corner of my eye. I literally can’t do anything sitting still without constantly looking around the room frantically. And i can never sit or lie down in a room with my back to a door. I haven’t been able to fall asleep until I’m physically unable to keep my eyes open. The earliest I sleep is about 5am if I’m lucky but that only because I force myself to exercise at night to exhaust myself. I’m in physical pain from exerting myself and mental torture from the paranoia and anxiety I have at night. Trust me I have tried everything when it comes to sleep aids but they don’t drown out my thoughts. Sometimes my thoughts are so loud I think that someone is actually speaking or that music is playing. It’s freaking me out and I just need to sleep already!! I thought sleeping in a different room might help but I kept thinking someone was going to break into the house and kill me when I slept on the sofa. Especially being quarantined right now I’m already going crazy and it feels like I’m trapped with my own demons in this house. What should I do?

Btw I’m 18 if that’s relevant",2.813161094224924,5.2395676666666695,3.9038145896656538,85.01250000000002,78.00709219858156,6.723606889564338,27.80192502532928,7.83500028581142,1.907630800405268,1150,50,216,19,28,372,154,282,0.16899999999999998,0.742,0.08900000000000001,-0.9778,1,2,2,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,1,0,12,14,2,1,11,0,21,14,9,0,1,45,46,23,2,4,11,0,3,4,0,2,5,2,6,0,11,18,0,2,9,2,0,6,6,7,0,0,10,10,33,7,32,33,2,45,1,1,5,0,3,21,0,7,19,138,44,0,0.09941843300671672,0.0,0.09701804933318084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194214260377164,0.0,0.16544820101240926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605482912992069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181289936504553,0.17700696661557522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644663824853193,0.0,0.12120910798472255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564017692561719,0.0,0.2148720140697533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038711023571978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935087704887028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15080684075361425,0.2130736452142219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300357315280965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663807999377631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22943104703084954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836767125743668,0.10999176605562457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702221793850085,0.19428329819223109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348644455346234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019039700577324,0.10546724645543487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10566606058401347,0.0,0.07371750834808996,0.07667762448676352,0.0,0.0,0.18659492917490414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122439653555395,0.10578822223985536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490614373508917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981637086650075,0.0,0.0,0.08490279857464703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792236193584403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39796092724018894,0.0,0.2527107469847451,0.15307433374749504,0.09832737236639236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793956890231893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604918927897496,0.12740663506064848,0.0,0.31570852264241084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749859001422315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974747013055378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583582166341972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013158767881946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402221129496158
mentalhealth,thatbatfromchina,2020/03/29,"I’m very lost and depressed Honestly I’m writing this because no one knows anything about me and here I just can express myself. In the real life I told my several friends about how I’m feeling but people have different perspectives and opinions and experience so I would like to just express myself on here. I will start from the current situation. Basically I am a female, living in another country, not in my homeland(let’s say from a harsh Slavic surrounding), and due to the quarantine I have been feeling very self focused. Because being with myself and seeing myself every day, being face to face with my problems and thoughts is very harmful. So I’m feeling very depressed. There are several things that trigger me the most right now: my looks (I have BDD), corona crisis and all this situation (I have anxiety), suicidal thoughts I’m having every day and people started triggering me a lot. As for a mentally unstable person I have a good skill to self analyze myself but right now I need some help. 
I feel more and more ugly. I don’t wear makeup these days and weeks and seeing myself being naturally ugly, not enough and disgusting just provokes me to think of worse things and hate myself 24/7. I think about it every second. I’m trying to imagine something better that when this whole thing is over I will go to the doctor, make myself better looking, solve my health issues, feel better. But suicidal thoughts give me more pressure and just don’t give me any hope at the same time. 
Corona situation gives me an idea that after all of this I will struggle a lot. It scares me, it makes me feel paranoid and anxious. I feel unsafe and insecure.  I know rn I’m at a better place, a good European country but it still makes me feel so unsafe. 
I have always wanted to commit suicide and I tried it 3 times. Right now it seems to be the best idea. 
People tell me I have so much to live for and I shouldn’t complain. They tell me I have looks, I’m a model, I might have a lot of further contracts and shit so I have to live, that I’m talented and have a good heart so I have everything to live for. But I honestly don’t see. I honestly don’t understand why I exist, for what and how to deal with what I have inside. I tried a treatment if anyone wants to mention seeking for a professional help. I tried it in my homeland and it was terrible. Here I can’t get it because of bureaucracy. 
People started triggering me a lot. Well, particularly, men. Because everyone is locked down men are very active right now and they “hit” on me a lot without knowing how much I am hurt inside. I try to put myself away from the social media, attention because that’s what triggers me a lot. But it doesn’t seem to help me. I even started being less interested in men, than in women. 
I’m very lost. I don’t know what to do in the future. Do you think isolating myself completely (no internet, social media, people) is a good idea or a trigger ? Right now my every day life is just full of triggers and pain. I know I described my feelings kind of shallow but if you want to know anything more about me in order to give me thoughtful advice, I’m open. I just really want to reach to people. Maybe some had the same feeling , the same period of having these mental conditions and feelings.",3.525072898799316,5.575978765723272,4.783025728987994,81.3667770154374,74.23584905660377,7.329857061177816,27.12967409948542,8.180337850089996,1.9639588679245288,2589,99,471,43,55,855,259,636,0.155,0.6940000000000001,0.151,-0.9213,2,1,1,0,0,2,73.0,0,2,2,8,32,36,3,4,30,0,48,10,5,13,3,122,116,47,3,11,19,0,11,1,1,6,5,1,0,7,28,30,0,0,32,0,0,2,13,17,1,2,10,18,79,19,62,94,25,51,0,5,6,0,31,25,1,17,24,342,107,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04936746364676865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04203660562071191,0.0,0.0,0.034355265836235736,0.05297452227401537,0.038647586835293714,0.05707310946616805,0.0,0.035324690201723664,0.0,0.08314714972422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04746511104606943,0.0,0.0,0.15398231708817145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05301752043444357,0.17872299184089602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05296915618124403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303246298155668,0.05208380075421744,0.08702543532005325,0.0,0.0,0.0527825450921721,0.0,0.05170926052139499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052200563700979884,0.0,0.03336791887928031,0.0,0.17026078573361147,0.04827393144919285,0.045404030474605936,0.04941815827300792,0.0,0.0,0.2809881850617676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03903155105034893,0.0,0.02639456372054489,0.19385317411007336,0.02871162460086005,0.16949478795825085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987794416623953,0.0,0.05370029352607609,0.0,0.05986632724449944,0.1015872764120194,0.0,0.0,0.05017766192387131,0.0,0.0,0.054082600086498386,0.17109246053658156,0.0,0.0527296523204752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052608703835841236,0.16658650194130034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05166002273582684,0.07136740182295691,0.02468147231224785,0.0,0.17843999652347994,0.0,0.1272719820304158,0.0,0.1102968819870646,0.257701284992068,0.0,0.0,0.10116728085619668,0.0,0.05075403200612004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182435783870154,0.053593632545052734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427588189095513,0.037459867279400295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03423359313525329,0.0,0.05375673776325299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101448344461037,0.044112029879212124,0.0527825450921721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04834072345770474,0.0,0.0507864553114011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05750270881560238,0.032364342927857115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21571860183052025,0.0,0.040175453878471074,0.050579235280547766,0.0,0.12077346344429706,0.09198284297270123,0.10540655176449323,0.1141462189323361,0.05185795352567786,0.0,0.17035946001855398,0.0,0.10299735616023094,0.0,0.038892688823579616,0.0,0.0,0.1430329869525962,0.0,0.04034525908446919,0.0,0.0,0.05281437073238485,0.0,0.16578171959012258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831324239837353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068953440284707,0.097113340104038,0.0,0.1604286365908714,0.05891712238156335,0.0,0.0,0.04827393144919285,0.0,0.17149848659697456,0.0,0.0,0.05259299977681802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25010526067875505,0.11919178876063602,0.0,0.04052401815932899,0.0,0.045423459193456486,0.0,0.045586353786402335,0.05640366653638649,0.0,0.0486993828273768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148409628633602,0.03588788897232352,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,smethe,2020/03/29,"You're not broken, you're perfect--and you don't need to change.  https://link.medium.com/kYGwHmx0f5
[You don't need to change because you're not broken.](https://link.medium.com/kYGwHmx0f5)",11.504444444444443,16.408598703703706,5.838518518518517,69.23333333333335,61.96296296296296,8.044444444444443,27.51851851851852,8.841846274778883,2.6383185185185187,163,5,21,3,3,41,15,27,0.0,0.882,0.11800000000000001,0.3724,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296315912413329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7969930255309358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5586335557044694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kh_129,2020/03/29,"should I go back to meds ? I got graduated in 2010 from college and at this point, I was already diagnosed with Social Anxiety Disorder and ADHD, since then I passed through a lot in my life with events ranging from being a father twice, getting married, immigrating, getting laid off, wife makes a big and critical brain surgery, lost all my rented apt belongings in a fire but without physical harm thankfully, etc...., to sum up, some shot that might be extreme to others and maybe sounds like life goals to some others

I was taking medications in this period mainly Seroxat and Wellbutrin for almost 6 years, never felt they made a difference but whenever I tried to stop any of them, I used to have a lot of snappy mood and couldn’t control myself, so I used to just halt this plans

Till I got some balls and stopped Seroxat and with the help of my doctor I replaced it with Lexapro, which reduced withdrawal symptoms drastically and in the beginning it made me feel like a please t person, but in the end, I had the goal to stop all of the medications , especially that the pleasant person feeling got vanished away, so once I got laid off and a paid vacation of 30 days I stopped it completely.

Now I am not saying I regret it but the feelings I have is, less talkative, can’t focus easily (bad procrastination episodes) and can’t draw a smile easily on my face, also gets irritated super easily with my child ( snapping without physical or verbal abuse or humiliations, just the kind of leave me alone or snapping “Concentrate more”)

What should I do now? Therapies do t work with me, every time I make these psychology sessions it never helped, medications did sometimes but u hates this dependency, but in the end, what should I do to focus more at my work and give better attitude to my kid and family and be a chill person in general, was thinking about taking Adderal and Zoloft

But are there any other alternatives to not rely on medicines and defeat this shit?

Please let me know your experiences",9.794433169494212,8.201292603773584,9.460260028539718,66.10729824005074,59.61994609164421,12.82644680513715,39.613286824163616,11.67016984619884,4.630497891231965,1600,66,276,38,17,520,213,371,0.133,0.738,0.128,0.2254,1,1,0,0,1,0,39.0,0,1,2,10,10,15,2,0,19,0,24,12,3,8,4,74,52,31,0,5,16,2,5,2,0,4,9,3,1,5,19,22,0,6,6,1,2,2,9,7,0,1,14,8,34,7,47,29,12,39,0,3,0,0,15,18,1,11,21,196,53,9,0.0,0.1063568457578875,0.0,0.0,0.10788008524521574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898866803297253,0.09296946762750734,0.0990579089396438,0.07178503755537625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220865554728318,0.0,0.06866997881124755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433717177990857,0.06902374364355196,0.07495002497738593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938984725683601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020742635118753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411689397626127,0.0,0.10067907965279788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057890998512783585,0.0,0.0,0.09110958480995827,0.0,0.0937853188228856,0.102878466139078,0.0918782805115984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590102915355799,0.0,0.10011170259011304,0.0,0.0,0.07563088349177523,0.0,0.0,0.08780739392502722,0.08462245251434683,0.0,0.1361636424355303,0.06412813347723645,0.08618847641535775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406955217524773,0.08611076685954389,0.051015517770362485,0.0,0.2871730807013079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862435276078802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033517380935338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347643342107158,0.049332496089605715,0.0,0.0,0.095048173277388,0.0,0.09179079360831288,0.12680734742591326,0.08770928896210717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798910060383896,0.152629984854802,0.0,0.16987562563881106,0.1198376682161913,0.0,0.0901810070910513,0.0,0.09970867821616916,0.2712863792888033,0.0,0.09522647887359588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384646026831022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559679470359472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351380051258712,0.0,0.1970700267433376,0.08485693900520397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138473039272479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214248188326493,0.0742545350748301,0.0,0.0,0.09150411247253523,0.0,0.0,0.08877987965013331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001902354954868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330020473733207,0.1349842162503882,0.0,0.0,0.0826435511008165,0.10265409986311724,0.0,0.0,0.057517787036780926,0.0,0.0,0.05234269299664135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06094454223475846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550562766589333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730605122192428,0.0,0.1306999772571851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780571652543017
mentalhealth,Patenski,2020/03/29,"How to deal with bullying? Hello, I (M22) am a computational science student who is facing a difficult situation right now, all my classmates usually make fun of me, spread rumors about me and don´t stop judging me although i don´t even interact with them.

At first i couldn't´ care less and i had a good self esteem, but this have been going for a year and a half now, it´s really tiring have to listening to the same jokes about me over and over and over again, they are not even funny and just make emphasis in how irresponsible and stupid I am and how all i do in class is sleep (this isn't true).

I avoid them the most I can but really this have changed the perspective i have in interpersonal relations and even have ruined my passion i had in this field of science, i don´t want to go to school and participate in class turned out to be a titanic task to do due to constant shame.

I only have 4 months to go in school, this is almost over, but the damage is there and I´m not the same person i was when i entered the career, maybe i can´to this much at this point of the situation but i hope you guys could give me some advice on how to deal with this type of harassment and how to prevent of happen in my new environment.",6.565196998123826,5.772615219512197,7.139593495934959,77.57929643527207,65.5040650406504,10.658661663539712,30.305190744215132,10.035473477838034,2.587881550969356,968,28,201,19,13,320,131,246,0.142,0.7829999999999999,0.075,-0.9651,0,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,3,1,16,14,2,2,13,0,23,4,2,7,3,44,35,23,0,3,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,9,16,0,3,0,1,0,4,3,7,0,2,4,1,28,7,37,29,8,33,0,2,0,1,15,17,0,4,12,153,37,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100269428783466,0.0,0.0,0.1444898718739357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711762877492382,0.0,0.15264420886631086,0.0,0.0,0.15593084842009552,0.0,0.115207236239893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2975221205465399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2859150207769115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273663552027247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384202155965845,0.2460172830673953,0.12102719080759848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14287401690411833,0.12759894971851293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14331677185107025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926350963536759,0.0,0.14496299242836114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517431264201786,0.0,0.106072893902006,0.0,0.0,0.13936030872103358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974229731914274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599219412969576,0.0,0.0,0.13640472870396605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18487721323240314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322652135319458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920670170327018,0.0,0.0,0.15053039691007591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32438561872669164,0.14439848132680982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063647390648395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658450411051754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695073467229806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891975676994974,0.0,0.08510850118049455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292078140723543
mentalhealth,Gillix98,2020/03/29,Schizophrenia help Hey so I personally don't have schizophrenia but my bestfriend of over a decade was diagnosed a year ago after experiencing an episode of psychosis. Recently they have started behaving exactly like they did before/during their psychosis however when I tried to express my concerns they claimed they are fine and blocked me. I'm still incredibly worried as I found out their mother did try to take them to the hospital yesterday but they refused. I'm very worried and as I currently live several hours from this person I have no idea how to help them. I feel like my only option right now is to call the police to do a wellness check. Any other suggestions or just support would be greatly appreciated,7.998692307692307,8.97345867692308,7.721346153846151,68.64740384615385,62.23076923076921,10.807692307692307,40.096153846153854,10.686352973137794,4.679384615384615,588,31,93,14,8,187,93,130,0.10099999999999999,0.7170000000000001,0.182,0.9129,2,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,9,0,7,6,0,0,6,0,12,1,0,1,1,16,19,10,0,1,4,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,2,3,0,2,3,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,4,2,19,6,14,13,0,14,0,0,0,0,19,3,0,2,13,66,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16114790231483328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362499568700493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18563026053926487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845153544639463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191964746445948,0.1298724530942022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993258700809772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004266489071332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24370308893655016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902879299085975,0.0,0.0,0.2052213751523831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776290669788566,0.0,0.16052592858514048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13826123352339312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174680428646712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17949796141608673,0.0,0.0,0.15524962809501458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20537355016351302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286735232919069,0.0,0.14517956298413826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062957439715324,0.0,0.0,0.1366851827962455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468500726141011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14999768361612012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16345310712039546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3692378034363257,0.0,0.1291400317077367,0.0,0.0,0.11706827878735265
mentalhealth,amifucked2020,2020/03/29,"Is there a way to get prescribed ssri during this pandemic? Hey not sure if this is the correct place to post but I have been struggling with depression and ocd since Im a child and have been able to manage ok . As of late It has gotten worse and I was planning on seeing a psychiatrist to get a prescription but now with the pandemic Im not sure anyone in NY will see me. I am pretty desperate to get on them now , anyone know how I can go about this?",1.5298817966903044,3.5096399787234063,3.4216312056737586,89.13388888888889,80.06382978723406,6.73096926713948,21.08274231678487,7.793537801064563,0.8423749408983445,354,10,76,6,9,119,63,94,0.195,0.736,0.069,-0.9191,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,1,5,5,0,1,6,1,11,0,0,1,3,15,19,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,2,6,3,13,14,0,10,0,1,2,0,3,4,0,1,3,52,10,1,0.1988048850282795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780179961111781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17123035616320545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31160204117472884,0.0,0.11298539762194458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4294867818401881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925796561463623,0.0,0.2242605696431772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077087913917154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19040012511107132,0.20225603972006395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31684350802461003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16445345528838876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078340309998532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37474250275996224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15780206412974596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20259916222030533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Minitha,2020/03/29,"I have some confusing memories of my mom - can someone help me figure out what mental health problem she has? For about 6 months of every year she does the following things:

1. She shouts a lot - irrational accusations and a lot of yelling and screaming.

2. She moves her lips and nods as though she is talking to someone, almost constantly, 

3. When asked a question or if talked to, she can’t hear us. We have to keep calling her. And then the fifth or sixth call, she snaps back at us like what??!! Like she’s annoyed that we kept calling (??).

4. Some nights(not a lot of them) I can hear her talking to herself in her room.

5. She has weird theories- like someone wants to attack her, or someone had sex with someone, or someone thinks something about her.

Also, she was prescribed quetiapine in India - I don’t have a lot of faith she was diagnosed correctly because of the stigma of mental disorders in our town, and a lot of denial (ignorance?) on her part, of her symptoms. 

And by posting this I’m not looking for a diagnosis, just some direction.",2.6451304139746346,5.21681101005025,3.6413926776740873,85.83375209380236,79.60301507537687,6.604546542234986,28.069155300311078,7.793537801064563,1.968112514955732,817,37,153,14,21,262,121,199,0.10099999999999999,0.836,0.063,-0.7809999999999999,0,0,1,0,1,0,42.0,5,0,1,0,7,11,2,1,10,0,13,5,1,0,1,36,23,16,0,3,7,1,0,3,0,0,3,5,1,0,5,10,0,3,3,0,0,2,3,7,0,0,4,6,31,4,27,19,9,17,1,0,1,1,38,8,0,16,9,113,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997975936365788,0.0,0.0,0.07970006213221871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931709804149424,0.1133804770703809,0.0,0.07663430770995568,0.0,0.06075333259490226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052996543906035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769975254468184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011553356727399,0.0,0.0,0.11422185489596905,0.0,0.08721532195970164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396995138101221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593657293666588,0.22465375273145752,0.0,0.0668016703473781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858460575779023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607018435687494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369139609148282,0.0,0.0,0.4236474511413091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20087271041955848,0.0,0.0,0.1167235109192968,0.07954965355944636,0.10592546103817213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079247712479453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954491220150598,0.0,0.0,0.09536354906331426,0.0,0.0,0.11164480447709968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.506662257222635,0.07672505857461473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358749354665732,0.0,0.2403148176752475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621133396006823,0.06385970331216798,0.09791789641409092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397634234020436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058783522372002565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417937993164932
mentalhealth,tandemm344,2020/03/29,"Does anyone else absolutely hate the idea of therapy via. video chat? I'm....between therapists at the moment but I recognize that I need therapy. This whole outbreak could not have come at a worse time (Or, more realistically, I shouldn't have put off getting a new therapist, it's my fault). My last therapist was kind, gentle, sweet, but I don't feel like we really made progress (I don't think I learned a single coping technique). So I decided I would try a new one, a daunting process. The idea of having to explain myself all over again to someone totally new just sounds exhausting. 

Now we're all stuck at home and therapists want to do telehealth sessions. I understand why, I get it, I really do. But the problem is I fucking hate video chatting. The idea of spilling my guts to someone behind my computer screen (and that somehow....helping?) just sounds absolutely awful. I won't feel any connection, I get to see my own stupid fucking face the whole time, the environment doesn't feel private (I live with my gf), and I'll just want to curl up in a ball the whole time. I feel like it wouldn't help one bit.

I had a telehealth meeting with my psychiatrist this previous week and hated every minute of it as well (and I told her, without being rude). 

Man this sucks",3.8141774891774918,5.952906623966942,4.6538724911452185,82.22180440771352,73.66942148760329,8.080598189689097,29.29240456513184,8.841846274778883,2.4816569854388035,1001,43,189,21,21,323,141,242,0.188,0.726,0.085,-0.9827,0,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,1,0,0,1,7,16,8,0,15,1,17,5,2,1,3,42,41,11,0,8,9,0,4,2,1,4,1,2,1,1,9,9,0,0,12,5,0,2,8,11,1,2,5,9,28,5,22,30,10,20,0,0,2,2,10,7,3,1,13,119,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366002006996091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06545635530594614,0.09591753588579366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220110219209876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063927236528261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474232785184252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192132846834467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820161241991103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887295275632056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18933409283107705,0.1337542286584855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730873383585634,0.14672671702183418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772702393112179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549358199446273,0.0,0.0939014274026322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31703289747476954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748348791735724,0.0,0.07630705333287878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146912326299957,0.0,0.08266195504145409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857884224582291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694128205612506,0.0,0.27123592815660336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12686912314667653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957495599606448,0.0,0.09410687665225208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994171316615995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459740566343652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15863590732993274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21410914681769544,0.434767427613256,0.0,0.05998340215202536,0.0,0.0,0.16375940202966074,0.0,0.0,0.0894511909632847,0.0,0.06355705207331645,0.0,0.0,0.09745438842741692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043069351938407,0.0,0.07509066649740133,0.0,0.0841692897294526,0.0,0.08447113204689098,0.31354656612249665,0.0,0.09023954880639054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539959954014024,0.06649995791436925,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anactualsackofshit,2020/03/29,"A minister committed suicide over COVID-19 stress: a tragedy in tragic times. this time is full of tragedies. all over the news is just panic and death. We are all feeling the stress and pain of the pandemic. The government officials are of course also feeling this stress, a minister in Germany very sadly took his own life today. He was under immense pressure and decided there was only one way out. But i’m here to remind you that there ARE other options. We may not all have the responsibility of looking after a country, but right now we are definitely all feeling the pressure. it seems surreal, our lives suddenly at a stand still. I know that many of you don’t have access to the things that help you cope with whatever mental difficulties you face, and i shared the feeling of despair we all felt when we realised that we could be locked up with just ourselves and our minds for months. A dangerous combo, my mental illness and me and without my daily routine and outside distractions i was sure i would sink right back into the dark place i fought so hard to get out of.  But we can do it, we can make it through this extra difficult time, it just needs some extra strength. And don’t lie to me, reddit stranger, i know you have strength and i think you’re stronger than you know. So push through this time, make yourself a routine, try to duplicate your normal life to stay as positive as possible. Remember your mental illness isn’t something you can magically remove, so these added pressures and the constant talk of death is likely to make it harder and that is ok. you are valid. but you aren’t allowed to just give up. We don’t need anymore tragedies in this time. We don’t need any more deaths ever. period. But thats up to you, whether it’s looking after your own mental and physical health, or checking in on others, no matter if they are openly suffering or not. Please care for yourselves and eachother in the awful time. Your family, your friends, your dog, cat, hamster and fish all care about you. And if there is no one left, I care about you. 

thanks for coming to my ted talk, just had to pour out my soul a bit because i know their are people out there in pain and i want them to know that they aren’t alone. Big loves everyone 🥰",4.784770496535796,6.292453801385688,4.8664022806004645,84.27352951789841,69.87759815242495,7.814347575057738,29.46658487297921,8.278499904357787,2.040912297921478,1788,69,341,26,32,557,220,433,0.20199999999999999,0.688,0.11,-0.9919,3,1,1,0,0,1,48.0,12,18,4,2,22,29,2,8,19,2,34,9,1,4,9,94,66,34,4,9,18,0,6,1,1,2,7,0,0,0,22,36,0,0,14,0,1,4,12,17,0,2,7,8,51,12,54,55,14,51,1,4,2,1,44,26,0,8,19,245,73,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114495826157094,0.0,0.07037626888436874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05984531420279882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727570288554272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766916487738947,0.0,0.05364604187167778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607689513507653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691759242600664,0.0,0.0,0.0758071170332946,0.0,0.0951003868891652,0.0,0.07026353572660543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796040928892208,0.0,0.08409099813555272,0.0,0.0,0.08296175184432111,0.0,0.17798860670049174,0.0,0.08449704280313514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799119085747267,0.0,0.04597813233730685,0.0844208582836157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883374027044672,0.0,0.0,0.09354347465013442,0.0,0.0,0.05898680864881741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418217728771768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561592673019023,0.0,0.12431877565119788,0.042994004836261014,0.0,0.07770859428942821,0.0,0.14780134511994106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942648372780693,0.0,0.1762288127456753,0.08922161171870566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.354746822068136,0.0,0.08885832394365123,0.0,0.0702434560122485,0.0,0.0,0.195760167132779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622462468683978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192667317572697,0.06693053388024321,0.18728359590023347,0.10325300165796472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06101046103320432,0.0,0.09194479852147583,0.09660128115444692,0.0,0.099210584947124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969067103854676,0.15030880642838232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011496935008375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774929915936956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379989078300996,0.07027961064288284,0.0,0.3024227134596388,0.0,0.0,0.09626141103806048,0.0,0.08294214145399098,0.0,0.0,0.1414675620332163,0.0,0.0810216860211775,0.0,0.0,0.058465533367292224,0.05638901063486581,0.0,0.0,0.3078928614020941,0.0,0.08341691154051663,0.0,0.09777499003928704,0.05974851636790578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261200257936443,0.0519066719114889,0.06985298453410192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483211513132276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251507416247612,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,awaythrowthrowawayme,2020/03/29,"Did anyones life significantly improve after treatment of ocd/ptsd. Using a throw away.  Sorry for a long post. I have been diagnosed with anxiety and depression by my primary care provider to try paxil/ zoloft but I gave them up before they had any affect, mostly just because the idea of medication and appointments seemed too daunting at the time (pathetic, I know). I tend to think I have ocd and PTSD that isn't diagnosed and am not sure how to go about getting diagnosed and have not seen a reason to because for a long time I kind of just assumed everyone is messed up and I don't /need/ the help even if something is wrong. It isn't debilitating, but it is starting to affect every aspect of my life. My relationship with my husband is very strained and close to the end and I'm not able to ever relax or feel happy. I work a full time job and do fine at it, but as soon as i clock off my entire being is exhausted and i have no energy for self care. My PTSD stems from sexual abuse as a teenager and neglect and  possibly more abuse as a child. I imagine this is the reason that once I had children my anxiety switched to ocd with me obsessing over people trying to hurt them/SIDS and compulsively checking and counting their breathing/locking doors/ peering out windows to make sure no one is out to get us. Intrusive thoughts and nightmares are prevelent as well. Basically my question, for anyone who relates to any part of this post is did treatment or a diagnosis improve your life? And if so were there any ways it improved it that you weren't expecting? Im starting to think most issues in my life are linked back to my mental illness and just want to know there is hope for my life to be ""normal"" again.",6.696491228070176,6.683753654654659,7.014031926663506,75.99173541963016,65.006006006006,10.01352931879248,34.343132606290496,9.682069395223575,3.175369969969972,1369,56,256,25,19,445,184,333,0.166,0.732,0.102,-0.9748,1,0,1,0,2,0,30.0,1,2,3,1,15,18,0,2,13,0,29,12,0,7,3,66,52,31,0,7,13,1,1,0,0,0,12,0,2,3,11,23,0,1,14,1,1,2,9,8,1,1,10,2,30,10,48,40,5,31,0,3,1,0,15,12,0,10,14,180,41,2,0.09191020349743698,0.21779712375353247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18750627034029155,0.0,0.14062210821249915,0.0,0.0,0.12853150260816384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863526616847297,0.07067327321124467,0.0,0.11205521394474223,0.0,0.07820881366996313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874171559191936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916212359500199,0.2798607655659417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140515990502578,0.0,0.0,0.06070582258428332,0.08313804102188642,0.0774383105011629,0.08782413816704181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046472560480924865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603857574731184,0.0,0.052234686719064206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784012068631114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06160547202039161,0.0,0.0,0.09128757035956866,0.0,0.0,0.09839177377604943,0.10375543240018643,0.09927879164733776,0.09593037343079128,0.09120669499415353,0.0,0.0,0.0957103334194082,0.10102288836543176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32459447418938964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16267527569959578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06135077452896578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258986057984804,0.09262386761484652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681502513033897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09005248504354152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788136710022627,0.06228073254462577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995297938037775,0.0,0.06371896253125428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036149446815219,0.17604913724737434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32231432833822843,0.0,0.10296046255534998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18899799363628286,0.0,0.09867716212279586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836715973582352,0.0958823871183904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707569649785988,0.0,0.1028859480161902,0.13010903018941428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17324855816750973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778469445959547,0.0,0.07296643510760924,0.16078073634489884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248019900611024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105566582025418,0.07938090593887136,0.0,0.0758355435005776,0.05421101933404879,0.07295404146843497,0.0,0.0,0.08263831091589724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691172279137461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10048937921898372,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cato_nyx,2020/03/29,"Not suicidal, just want a break My mental health has kinda suffered due to the lockdown in my country. I'm exhausted to the core, not physically. I can't talk to my therapist because I won't have any privacy currently, and violation of my privacy/boundaries just makes me feel worse. I'm not suicidal. I won't try anything. But I can't help but wish I could just curl up in a ball and cease to exist, even if it's just for a little while. I'm just so tired.",2.3559210526315795,3.989176210526317,4.567565789473687,83.46608552631581,76.3684210526316,8.539473684210527,27.66447368421053,9.188382445141503,2.375552631578948,360,15,76,9,8,125,61,95,0.204,0.746,0.05,-0.9001,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,7,3,1,0,5,0,7,3,0,1,0,19,14,7,2,4,11,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,3,0,0,0,1,10,0,9,11,0,8,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,2,3,48,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15959427479606514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931262753845525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14306218059407155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873773774650944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155007643962861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866410506287628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24945984823644074,0.0,0.0,0.15730482953002875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352166534459953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15665447909594382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365079144388766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5134159721646752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18863141810359668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724881025745605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697366058080816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15933613628568427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13842366392662256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698768901837449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391647047505095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anynameiguess,2020/03/29,"I was a dumbass who thought self harming was cool when I was 11 and I want to slap past me for thinking that. It just lead to me developing an unhealthy coping mechanism and enabling my depression and anxiety. Seriously, I don’t know what made me think it was a cool or deep thing to do but it fucking sucks. I’ve grown to be okay and accepting of most of my scars except for the ones on my arm because those were the ones made because of ignorance and not mental illness.",5.078771929824561,5.5404638421052645,5.987105263157897,80.33890350877195,68.47368421052633,9.701754385964913,33.7280701754386,9.725611199111238,3.1067543859649125,375,17,76,8,6,124,65,95,0.179,0.685,0.13699999999999998,-0.66,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,2,2,10,2,0,5,3,8,3,1,3,0,21,17,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,8,5,0,1,5,0,0,2,2,6,0,2,8,2,10,4,11,8,1,6,0,1,0,1,2,2,2,2,2,55,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19452785293153696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100203866310295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190158877886592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350830181773345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974876227124464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4812225268301217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25626016173934024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3446211220955791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427444592540101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26527542698912665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16893610997875486,0.3258719985451853,0.0,0.20187442981728695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998428526397548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,golgiapparation,2020/03/29,"Very grateful for my friend to have shared her struggle with anxiety in this mini doc. https://vimeo.com/313487795

I hope people find some comfort in perhaps relating to her struggles. 

It's a tough time to be living in this uncertain times 💜",6.136428571428571,9.240653833333337,4.800238095238097,79.3489285714286,70.19047619047619,8.009523809523811,31.92857142857143,8.841846274778883,3.1670285714285717,199,9,30,4,4,58,36,42,0.19899999999999998,0.53,0.271,0.6997,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,0,8,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,4,8,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,3,2,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341206163052793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797160359044448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364466072927892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3039678825081658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702399126343248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121703758786952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6398812468337377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35691007207488795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525159721737542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sweetasphyxiation,2020/03/29,"I’m not handling this well.. So my therapy has been cancelled, I’ve been in therapy consistently every week for the past 10 years (I’m 20 years old to clarify)- I’m not hanging in there. It’s getting increasingly harder with everything going on. I don’t know what I’m going to do.

Does anyone have any sort of advice on what I can do, any healthy coping skills? Anything..",1.4574624624624626,4.040689581081082,3.562612612612611,84.16512012012012,85.62162162162161,6.5321321321321335,24.43843843843844,7.793537801064563,1.6973231231231238,295,12,56,6,9,100,53,74,0.03,0.9309999999999999,0.04,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,0,0,5,16,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,1,0,2,0,3,1,9,14,1,13,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,5,30,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22734332353093506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164205628177884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16267460144645635,0.0,0.19145149420356886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20359397336230253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196018035140647,0.0,0.20909121974858472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155025589957545,0.0,0.26444122012978205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12785860095260915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441275073761378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22209117594168265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5321121220668606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18661815476462795,0.0,0.20918069142059606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29963851934757
mentalhealth,matrix-4f,2020/03/29,"How social distancing affects a social species: A survey-based study of high school students Public health experts have concluded that coronavirus is [one of the greatest threats of this century](https://www.statnews.com/2020/03/07/harvard-forum-experts-warn-most-daunting-virus-in-50-years/). In the last month, our cities have transformed from busy hubs of commerce and activity into ghost towns. It’s clear that the world will be impacted by this pandemic for many years to come. Yet, paralleling the havoc outside, this chaos has impacted our personal lives as well. Unemployment and medical bills are compounding the stress people are experiencing. Furthermore, as social distancing is becoming widely practiced, many are finding it difficult to cope with this newfound sense of isolation.

An excerpt from  [""How social distancing affects a social species: A survey-based study of high school students""](https://anthroanalyst.home.blog/2020/03/29/how-social-distancing-affects-a-social-species-a-survey-based-study-of-high-school-students/). Feel free to check out the full article.",14.04841959972395,15.669626664596276,10.076107660455488,54.683988957902,49.43478260869566,12.869841269841272,45.8391994478951,12.261556223090626,6.3931650793650805,907,45,104,23,9,255,102,161,0.152,0.769,0.079,-0.8859999999999999,2,1,0,0,0,0,70.0,2,0,0,1,4,5,1,1,11,0,10,2,0,5,1,14,12,6,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,8,6,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,3,1,1,0,2,2,3,19,10,2,14,0,0,0,0,9,9,0,0,4,59,10,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769151471055568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179541041499643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053881936949564765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739752324006866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327249977574723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377720039939583,0.10689233439424783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868638452802597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409792358199773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21607824663768505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735197239627284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.085058331274887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221049301812536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387802793887281,0.09304753412892416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3235452313891974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7603997171661614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206864908058583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581379231765304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13724738487173005
mentalhealth,CCRARA,2020/03/29,"I’m hurting right now and wish I wasn’t When a man complains about his girlfriend being distant.

In my mind I’m like you all deserve it , most of you dont event realize the hell you put your SO out. Because it’s become the norm “because all guys do it” you think it makes it ok to follow sexually explicit content on social media.",2.314754901960786,4.156805279411767,4.100588235294119,85.84931372549022,77.08823529411767,6.298039215686276,27.509803921568626,7.1686216300943375,1.471109803921569,261,11,52,3,6,88,54,68,0.13699999999999998,0.7609999999999999,0.102,-0.5423,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,5,0,0,4,5,1,0,3,1,4,0,0,1,3,11,10,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,1,0,8,2,6,8,3,9,1,1,0,0,11,4,1,1,4,33,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34591915520639915,0.313358223761048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3325302218654256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28093796270524424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037395411217021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13861646929585592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18939241958686112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28648708533958284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852276814874113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24230443442668315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28922767809629724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818031511849113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3262762578985875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asongfromthewillow,2020/03/29,"Has anyone else been abandoned by the mental health system because of COVID-19? TW: COVID-19, suicidal thoughts

I got my first referral when I was 17, after years of putting it off. I was referred to CAMHS and they turned me away because I would be 18 by the time I got to the front of the waiting list.

Then when I was at uni I kept going to my GP and all he did was offer me antidepressants. He wouldn't even listen to my symptoms. He just heard ""mental health"" and tried to prescribe them to me. I didn't know you could self refer to therapy.

When I was 21 I found out you can self refer to therapy and did. Then right after that I got kicked out of uni for my mental health and had to move away, meaning I couldn't go any further with that referral.

I moved to London but I was technically, legally homeless, so I couldn't register with a GP because you need proof of address (and you need to be registered in order to self refer). I was trying to get registered for about a year. Then I finally moved somewhere legally and I could register. I self referred but then they took me off the system because I didn't reply to a letter that I never received. They said I could refer again in a few months. 

I ended up going to A&E one day and I got really lucky. They actually took me seriously and I was referred to a psychologist, who saw me the next week. She was great and she offered me 5 more sessions. But then I got fired because of my mental health and I had to move back home (which I really, really didn't want to do) immediately. So I lost those sessions.

I registered with a GP back home and self referred to therapy. I finally got an appointment and we talked through everything. The lady said that I'm medium risk and the only reason I'm not high risk is because I assured her I'd be okay for four weeks. She said that I'm too much for them though (I have dissociation, extreme mood swings, severe anxiety focusing mainly on health and death, and a history of trauma) and referred me for a ""specialist mental health assessment"". 

I got a letter about it and I called the number. They told me my referral hadn't been processed yet and to call back in a week. I did and they said the same thing. This went on for about a month. Then they told me that my referral is cancelled, to start again once COVID-19 is over and to call the Samaritans if I need to, even though when I have a bad mood swing my brain doesn't work like that.

I don't know what do do. Everything is worse. The dissociation, the mood swings. The anxiety is through the roof given what it tends to focus on.

I just don't know how I can survive this year. Either COVID-19 will kill me or my mental health will.

Why do they keep abandoning me? They always say you just have to ask for help. I've been asking for 5 years.",3.132205024500273,4.842090837209304,4.263480205335618,86.13989947110525,74.43828264758497,7.508454538383759,25.390098778875323,8.252601668568683,1.5221923154701718,2194,74,450,37,46,716,227,559,0.109,0.848,0.043,-0.9892,0,0,0,0,0,1,67.0,1,5,11,4,24,17,1,2,28,1,51,9,1,2,4,76,97,41,3,12,10,0,1,1,0,4,8,7,3,5,18,27,0,5,16,0,0,13,12,9,0,3,44,9,83,5,67,41,7,70,0,3,1,0,51,18,0,3,37,312,101,5,0.0,0.0,0.053488480265602906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045607868307269386,0.05938864030213761,0.0,0.0372739524703264,0.0,0.08386186395170615,0.0,0.0,0.03832573527110626,0.05616124012761553,0.0,0.0,0.1024834023330204,0.0,0.10299511589072928,0.1264408384656054,0.04576562354203766,0.2004768501844585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06118817641339847,0.16790714862986694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128845888562918,0.0,0.0,0.035349122901668195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045788285665622784,0.0,0.048547049476786036,0.0,0.0,0.07240544889209784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852275234538807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008745296389725,0.0,0.04662295023641915,0.0,0.06009838840613833,0.0,0.0,0.028636940790512263,0.0,0.09345254982042994,0.0,0.3068664278205404,0.06043028227127836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4078371969678218,0.0,0.0,0.03673924234905982,0.057911752041620725,0.10996155320262267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04871931019699589,0.06064121520151981,0.0,0.09036951402379707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026778311955137638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059833633021619835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059706197148599476,0.0,0.0,0.3314248499045052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750062642764317,0.2330253817774509,0.04029303258039328,0.1219269254826488,0.04227429465303488,0.0,0.05829304759144995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837285470618887,0.03714194294098744,0.0416868984965423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05510107039884675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10534166602959996,0.05635573321628878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046809039114552704,0.2085545678723156,0.043588600521334224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2859036820773737,0.06192181366653553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03879612504509178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05995529153043388,0.0,0.0,0.05697052199371666,0.0,0.04405570639540938,0.0,0.0,0.18804645725467053,0.0,0.03641457215012523,0.0,0.10770477169089583,0.04351450374210382,0.03196124328955879,0.0,0.0,0.10475018502084524,0.12179601293965897,0.07442732614697121,0.05961957700060421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03232946217251507,0.0,0.1319003323080944,0.0,0.0,0.05081115438678748,0.04945918894732156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03990369554853376,0.0,0.055857980174047764,0.03893678116743997,0.0,0.0,0.14118819369993768
mentalhealth,Eating-All-Reality,2020/03/29,"I have had very bad thoughts in the past and don't feel like I am deserving to be happy with a good life because of these thoughts I don't know if I deserve to be happy, I don't think people should like me or get close to me, I have had bad thoughts in the past that I don't think are redeemable. Because of these thoughts I feel as though I deserve anything bad that happens to me in life and I don't to have a good happy life. But living like this is worse than death but I don't think I deserve to be loved by anyone or myself for my bad thoughts.",5.526,3.8872956000000016,5.6816666666666675,89.95000000000003,68.0,8.333333333333334,31.666666666666664,5.46131890053228,1.3094166666666671,432,14,104,1,6,137,56,120,0.175,0.6920000000000001,0.133,-0.5013,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,13,0,0,4,0,18,4,0,0,0,21,32,9,1,2,5,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,11,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,7,2,17,9,16,21,0,6,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,3,5,68,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726369363313438,0.0,0.10270051001959883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4168141666117041,0.15215494507178084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620617351740673,0.08915779054024102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520332121631699,0.0,0.0,0.20935415377089656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036102698129101,0.3985586479585833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858731284835562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644517072552029,0.18291425283318616,0.0,0.11020148442634267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11263768814255665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382731681980059,0.08652123272688432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399021395555125,0.12261625423722405,0.4953898857110199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297381576112234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718278291058865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ColtAzayaka,2020/03/29,"Constantly terrified of dying (M18) I wake up literally hyperventilating after having dreams about my dying, and it just fucking is terrifying the shit out of me. I haven't been really thinking about it for weeks and weeks but all of a sudden, I'm so fucking scared of it and think of it literally hourly? 

I don't know what's going on. Maybe, subconsciously, this whole corona virus thing and isolation is making me anxious? But I don't feel like that's the cause, but maybe it is? It only really picked up since the isolation...",5.541957142857144,6.882259110000002,6.737428571428571,72.20300000000002,67.9,10.114285714285714,27.285714285714285,10.290406445055957,2.8429714285714285,421,13,76,11,7,142,64,100,0.182,0.777,0.042,-0.9393,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,3,1,4,0,8,4,2,3,1,17,17,8,2,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,5,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,1,7,1,13,16,2,11,0,0,0,2,0,4,3,0,7,53,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091600082082963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19019387676151414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000748782910502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38430045982670624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361436369417037,0.13226690259572155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34232526855923684,0.0,0.0,0.10522159548270736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18232953455630654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10175029431355416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090452000945958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235850501938891,0.0,0.3720040435959429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081034639376766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372159602223688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18536143142367004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19004764391759507,0.15315302076458298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300143937705706,0.23726558447910734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29702268021204725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20670665162762675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thappiness93,2020/03/29,"Feeling lost and like a failure Background. 27, no degree...moved back in with parents a little over a year ago. I lived in California for a few years and moved back home due to anxiety, depression and suicidal thoughts. I'm feeling really low because the past ten years, I have had great trouble navigating through my depression. My moments of hope last for a short amount of time before I'd isolate in my room. I know I am capable of being successful, but count myself out before really trying. I attended three different colleges, and ended up withdrawing or failing due to severe depression. I'm worried that if I were to enroll in a community college again, that even if I did really well with an AA Program, I'd have great difficulty finding a school to transfer due to poor transcripts. 

This post is a bit all over the place, but was wondering have you experienced this or know someone who has and conquered? I don't want my mental health to get in the way of success anymore. I have talked with therapists before and have increased exercise and being mindful of what I eat. I don't want to feel ""stuck"" or throw the towel in, because I'm still alive which means I have a chance. I just don't know which direction I'd like my life to head in. My parents are from Haiti and of course would be elated if I was pursuing a degree in the STEM field...I was always passionate about music, but gave up on that dream. I feel empty without it but know I need to survive and pay bills and what not. Thank you for listening <3",6.105340136054423,6.5671171530612265,6.633741496598643,76.5934013605442,66.24489795918367,9.93469387755102,33.68027210884354,9.861636050157227,3.270933333333332,1209,51,223,25,18,395,168,294,0.159,0.6809999999999999,0.16,0.7361,4,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,2,0,6,8,17,0,0,16,0,23,6,1,0,1,46,47,20,1,8,13,2,4,2,0,1,3,1,2,0,11,14,1,0,12,2,3,4,6,7,2,2,10,6,25,10,39,33,5,41,0,6,0,1,8,19,0,8,18,147,36,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638528117473104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047460138334884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318047953017245,0.0,0.10783396024425553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167217995247086,0.0,0.1325653063840391,0.0,0.2775714305771675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870832027528187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809548292922164,0.0,0.0,0.11360288626301393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126104722055484,0.0,0.0,0.0963052015533436,0.0,0.0,0.07181714876872303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21991477243147625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938003054148803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056808526664842963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397571253776716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159147059629944,0.11557813908139905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090681066967942,0.10799644485742886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390273451187751,0.08863194165241292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07680136319707867,0.1062429440261246,0.1089790732995051,0.0960132681856782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11869495983625684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844215894374906,0.0,0.0,0.10957733207213194,0.0,0.10978937613458188,0.0,0.0,0.11556601585979608,0.0,0.08062417290674424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414703509513293,0.0,0.10379799200861636,0.0,0.0,0.11360288626301393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041361976665923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20897151296077607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004364350469556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283738785311415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921291536518158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683434781367738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893629988345412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739550044155875,0.0,0.10010677634745783,0.0,0.12624744238415092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632188976553365,0.06340311121004885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382259810751148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826713071920284,0.08630722764927408,0.0,0.0,0.09776406308971597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481477236000013,0.1179163458300733,0.0,0.11042368219916454,0.0,0.07724083334790109,0.0,0.0,0.21006154232493826
mentalhealth,ThRoWaWaY1776181290,2020/03/29,"Coronavirus is wrecking my mental health For the past few days I have been super hormonal but at the same time the quarantine stuff has not helped. I’m trapped at home with my family and I hate every single one of the members, including my great-uncle who lives in our basement. I am so angry and irritable all the time. 

I have been out of my antidepressants for six/seven days now. The longest I’ve been without them is like four or five days. 

I am super anxious, because I don’t know when I’m going to get my antidepressants back. I am paranoid that my family is purposefully keeping my medicines from me so that I will suffer and try to kill myself. 

I am very suicidal. I have no hope at all. The only person who could talk me out of my suicidal ideation is my girlfriend but at the same time she is part of the reason I want to die. she is SO ANNOYING AND WONT SHUT THE HELL UP AND STOP BEING SO CLINGY AND I JUST WANT TO TURN EVERYTHING OFF AND LEAVE HER TO HER OWN DEVICES BECauSE SHE WONT LEAVE ME ALONE AND I HAVE TO SIT THERE AND PRETend i LIKE IT OR SHE’LL HAVE A PANIC ATTACK AND I cANT DO THIS ANYMORE

Im freaking the fuck out I need this quarantine to end and I need to get outside and drive around but my mom won’t let me cuz I’m from NJ and apparently the CDC doesn’t want us to even DRIVE WHICH IS BULLSHIT AND IT MAKEs IT SO THAT IM STUCK IN THIS FUCKING HOUSE WITH THIS PEOPLE WHO ARE OUT TO FUCKJING GET ME AND I CANT TAKE IT

I can’t believe this is my downspiral and I’m sorry that reddit has to see it but I need help and advice and a hug and I need to know when I’m going to have a therapy appointment next because that has made it even worse (not having therapy, i mean).

I feel like I’m going to die alone and that my cats will eat my corpse as I slowly have a heart attack in my recliner while watching the five oclock news or I will get Corona and be one of the people who they decide doesn’t deserve a ventilator. I am so scared of everything and I just want to die",0.7727965134377932,2.982850391408114,2.6912695859707405,91.99110589395045,84.4653937947494,5.8391823181488025,20.32587942305697,7.1686216300943375,0.4803366815398982,1570,47,344,23,46,523,192,419,0.27399999999999997,0.642,0.084,-0.9988,1,5,0,0,0,3,19.0,2,0,2,2,16,19,8,2,19,0,46,6,1,4,2,67,82,40,6,10,12,1,1,3,1,7,1,0,1,1,23,29,1,2,6,1,0,5,13,12,0,5,5,3,57,7,43,66,8,37,1,1,2,3,20,15,3,4,19,249,80,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836599983110334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17733842393316893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671828141119368,0.0849050561467387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621368963421694,0.0,0.1947942137946169,0.0,0.0658310853233977,0.0,0.15656660605088998,0.0,0.0,0.09645649388708936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835498596624927,0.0,0.0,0.16563983904867915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665582226141083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760343624409722,0.0,0.0,0.07582767549840788,0.0,0.0,0.11309311157070195,0.0,0.07213261526269184,0.0,0.15388682473130347,0.0,0.16141656762390186,0.0,0.04328848736172247,0.06116191912700701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829561273349313,0.17891696215799288,0.0,0.14596746246485773,0.0,0.0,0.09438859588232687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452507818838588,0.0,0.09100257809148322,0.0,0.10145177544462364,0.1147691312624054,0.0,0.08587678410339301,0.0850329914017661,0.0,0.09878586671019753,0.0,0.0,0.184953386387086,0.0,0.0,0.0760967367520571,0.0947180608850131,0.0,0.0941012929134104,0.0,0.0,0.18130353627787746,0.0,0.08754505691746448,0.0,0.12547851030371665,0.0,0.0755978163805883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100905728574484,0.0571473187693007,0.0,0.0,0.0932576169184668,0.0,0.0,0.08627773208848474,0.0,0.0,0.1002688695989424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539237142705664,0.0,0.0,0.091050359274488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602712119739847,0.06511251756386137,0.0,0.10044836779585542,0.0,0.09271049790678376,0.08172726216720567,0.11870650016662798,0.07475393857777615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802438658693328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571351302186977,0.0,0.06822244856154967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583670480617873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07157627202969144,0.0,0.0,0.0980063619217233,0.18729337579026684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437029483057745,0.06881245810832735,0.0,0.0,0.19581177288162813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14976482468899835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05812558328581175,0.09312232127136574,0.0,0.0,0.10298185535353477,0.0,0.0,0.07063966203759246,0.20198697907091184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252784291771871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724692520519793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Irealisment,2020/03/29,"How to deal with OCD-like triggers? I mean actions or how stuff is arranged around you (virtual or not) that makes your skin crawl, your muscle tense, and your whole body scream 'no!'.

The most recent one is from today. My mum visited me for the weekend. I don't live here too, but I used to when I was in high school, so for most of the year the flat is empty. However, I came back here due to the covid-19 pandemic since it's much closer to the rest of my family. 

The last time I was here (about 3 weeks ago) I organized pantry and fridge but I came back to everything haphazardly thrown in the fridge because mum thought she saw a pantry month when she came by a week ago. I hated how it looked but not enough to fix it in a couple of days since I've been here.

Anyway, I had to buy some fresh produce and missing pantry items so I could self-isolate in peace without going outside and thus I filled the fridge even more. It was a mess, but an acceptable one. My mum came on Friday and squeezed in some more food because she didn't think we had any (???). 

For most of the weekend I had control over the fridge but I lost it today. 

Mum simply packed some food home and cooked dinner. The end result was distressing enough to throw me off for the rest of today. 

Food doesn't fit in the fridge the right way. I have no idea what is missing, it looks like I'll have to go buy food soon when I know it should have lasted way longer. Chinese cabbage is ruined (who cuts it this way?), baby tomatoes aren't in their container (and for whatever reason it's the worst thing about all of that) and 2/3 of the container worth of tomatoes is missing. The cucumber is cut weird. I know full well mum had bought her own tomatoes so why the heck did she mess with mine when they were in the back of the fridge? She also left some stuff she bought ""for herself"" that I know will be wasted because I don't eat stuff like this (she didn't take home all of what she bought) and many, many more irking details. It's not funny how much it affects my mood. It all sounds trivial but it affects me so much I can't even focus.
As for much simpler situations that I hate in the exact same way, they are taking the cutlery container out of the dishwasher (even when someone else does it) or putting back the hoover.

The last example stems from me never being able to do it correctly enough according to my pedantic mom when I was younger.

I hate this feeling, especially because it's with me for hours after the fact and I know I shouldn't react like this, but I do anyway. 

Any advice on how can I deal with this?

PS. These situations don't affect my daily life because I live alone and I don't have (m)any triggers that concern public places. To be honest, I can only think of one and that is how the online learning platform my uni uses is organized.",3.6865079365079367,4.935853497354497,4.0972222222222205,89.7325,72.22751322751324,7.022574955908289,24.78747795414462,7.35660576581511,0.9320589065255728,2211,64,468,23,42,693,256,567,0.133,0.813,0.054000000000000006,-0.9932,1,1,0,0,0,0,70.0,1,4,3,3,36,23,5,1,33,0,46,10,2,20,7,90,79,40,0,3,14,6,3,3,0,3,1,2,2,0,35,23,7,4,13,3,6,11,17,16,1,3,24,8,61,6,59,48,28,71,0,5,3,0,29,23,1,10,36,326,96,3,0.0668002910183021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652764712655699,0.11842885497760106,0.0,0.0,0.06918495558126413,0.0,0.053420168593055775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362794657160909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059466421490411474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205461201828751,0.0,0.2036041869343598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420006427369469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30560694849743114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492220652106288,0.053334596788963136,0.07391325144990989,0.0,0.043080661456610575,0.1377363336978678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05845738482933353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835337442265793,0.05580307151966647,0.0,0.0591652304653942,0.2070676723958007,0.0,0.13236288662711834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06003579425962004,0.0,0.06297336929840057,0.0,0.03377623426302168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231007082226509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592828959802339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19785437302082334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057817505131084,0.13401227690833886,0.0,0.06578483075909662,0.0,0.0,0.07540939760029472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468467718605034,0.1633534586879743,0.0,0.0,0.07257871164639884,0.0,0.047183021065530836,0.09790574393553199,0.0,0.11797176161445096,0.0,0.11219084074434864,0.0,0.0729204086645622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044589712967477366,0.13545002074459347,0.0,0.07276510009528625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823569348964872,0.05331935497885795,0.0,0.1964236001537888,0.0,0.05152050254062887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579681799736382,0.05080463145581684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979208639693489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715274283757572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868182473957297,0.06595722853341801,0.0,0.0,0.05704708353904085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760546080785339,0.0,0.0,0.06968727213422597,0.0,0.0,0.11051578205099977,0.15017265185409934,0.0,0.0,0.05659966980466955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22941105415905874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004510108939434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04437914511346566,0.08560585841399188,0.0,0.05303196940361768,0.03895178688648225,0.0,0.1899565953970105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153880073426438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21209184685087265,0.1071663282468844,0.0,0.060061484017895836,0.0,0.06027687252340685,0.07458013934601264,0.0,0.06439309676769928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04301719728221552
mentalhealth,Humanity360Inc,2020/03/29,I love you I just wanted everyone to know that you are ENoUgh and I love you!❤️,-3.4376315789473684,-2.533356999999995,-0.0743421052631561,104.05585526315792,119.0,4.0052631578947375,10.013157894736842,5.985473137389443,-1.3055368421052629,63,1,17,1,4,22,15,19,0.0,0.58,0.42,0.8655,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,11,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4257888262668368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3937601273576232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22646840731387524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7438366303564361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430554779434465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jamesrankin1,2020/03/29,"As someone susceptible to depression, I shared the steps I take for good mental health in quarantine. Hey  guys, I made this edit of a Facebook Live I did the other day  discussing the steps I've been taking to manage my own mental health,  whilst in isolation. 

In all honesty there isn't anything too  groundbreaking that comes up but maybe a few points that might be helpful to even one person at this time.

Hope you're all coping well!  


  
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmKC3oRQqD8](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nmKC3oRQqD8)",9.297005163511187,12.661652951807234,5.525851979345958,76.56385542168678,61.650602409638545,7.634423407917385,26.314974182444054,8.418075326091056,1.89944199655766,437,12,63,6,7,116,66,83,0.048,0.76,0.191,0.9082,0,2,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,5,0,5,2,0,1,2,7,10,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,1,1,3,0,5,4,11,5,4,12,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,2,3,41,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16535425662477513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17308967048782908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12958791945681578,0.0,0.1730669807987798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271717526576834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16853665313584726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989594938824506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4271738548338956,0.0,0.0,0.13468402007252409,0.0,0.0,0.19957605315661608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774312954510857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013170836997484,0.0,0.0,0.2018685008666604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4049950251465829,0.21316269526259296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616029805591545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754506782993736,0.0,0.0,0.18995067384664388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17025350131443748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3021596481797429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716814113516742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18066674211135175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,agcooper2,2020/03/29,"Pandemic happiness? vent/realizations So am I the only one who feels, relief? I see people complaining about how professors have assigned all this stuff and students are basically having to teach themselves. I just sorta feel like, welcome to my life! Welcome to crappy online school, welcome to isolation working from home, welcome to the job insecurity and uncertainty, welcome to anxiety and depression! For some of us, not a thing has changed from our daily lives. I also wonder if my issues are simply a product of the way I live. Seeing everyone complaining and upset makes me see actually how well I've managed given a lot of things in my life. And for all the people who couldn't empathize maybe now they get it?  What if this creates a better world? What is people become better after this. Of course not all, but maybe a lot more people will understand now. Maybe mental health will be taken seriously now? unemployment, isolation, job insecurity, money, not seeing anyone, being stuck, not having control. Welcome world, welcome to fun house.",5.082674719585847,8.213163612021859,5.963037100949098,69.46550474547024,74.08196721311475,8.005637043428242,29.303710094909405,8.841846274778883,3.169498360655738,843,36,119,19,19,276,117,183,0.152,0.675,0.17300000000000001,0.6672,4,2,0,0,0,0,30.0,2,0,1,4,10,21,0,3,9,0,13,3,0,4,3,29,26,12,0,3,8,0,2,1,0,2,3,0,1,0,11,5,0,1,4,0,1,0,5,7,1,1,3,6,12,14,18,18,7,8,0,1,4,0,14,3,0,7,5,92,23,10,0.0,0.0,0.11562635045807942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475411796364454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906423329210142,0.0,0.0,0.08284895880413097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308597300440142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20958448189950332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534367655781226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328933955426747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205279458318997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321953384753165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982130981676015,0.08464723194722798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061904636950778726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261317570190226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12594628235110555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188522558912329,0.0,0.0,0.13671824383341966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123669783596348,0.2351603945460017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16738193314146912,0.057886828480181375,0.0,0.2092526195779872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014670477613764,0.0,0.0,0.07909108177233695,0.0,0.35710875448357704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194071622378169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028994822554986,0.09011480436790932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285762381779575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13486429821703916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991530496979012,0.3776756197205298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13563942021938402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743517334213944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334928479238733,0.1425254328328843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404957156128868,0.0,0.0,0.10653416287501292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12849424210979646,0.08626004446483335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nasais-the-best,2020/03/29,"Unknown emotions For the past week I’ve been really down and irritated. It feels like I have a pit in my stomach and I don’t want to leave my room. I don’t know how to deal with it and I just need some advice.

Thank you if you read this",-1.2925876010781678,0.7045096603773615,1.1666307277628043,100.18396226415095,93.90566037735849,4.538005390835579,15.118598382749324,6.1826913282559595,-0.7998118598382749,184,4,47,2,7,62,41,53,0.08800000000000001,0.7879999999999999,0.124,0.2111,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,1,1,0,12,9,5,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,8,2,6,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,3,30,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026934756021507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31934852447895445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484378339054183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15662375038981388,0.22129230514949466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17023576372018448,0.0,0.0,0.3279906684367793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15133288375169665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22968280289885096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957005682078416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30984340436786795,0.0,0.19843991817177714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851850028557523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827042253038444,0.0,0.248470449885364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HeavyText1,2020/03/29,"Relapsing and being triggered I relapsed self harming at the start of the year and now my old ED has been triggered to high hell. I can't do phone calls and nobody checks my eating. I'm really low right now and the suicidal thoughts have come back. I've got nobody for emotional support, I'm scared of how I'll be in lockdown.",5.44590909090909,5.6581655606060615,5.863181818181817,82.41477272727273,67.63636363636364,9.024242424242424,31.65151515151515,8.841846274778883,2.4453151515151514,261,10,52,4,4,84,50,66,0.242,0.7,0.057999999999999996,-0.9402,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,1,1,3,0,7,1,0,3,0,9,14,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,4,0,0,3,0,4,1,6,9,0,12,1,1,0,0,3,5,1,0,6,28,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19983597997760266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653722483881014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22386842735644613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26592784313435136,0.0,0.2923363135643305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20785425049346054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745833987316987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727062134022741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664893662439986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22194087725409453,0.0,0.0,0.26019081696592483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711173534459527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18394836103119816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842726586573435,0.29491509224619045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20632013210449746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16735780182861712
mentalhealth,LunaAK-47,2020/03/29,"How can I help? I hope I can post this here because I don’t have any problems myself (at least, not anymore). I really just want to help others on this subreddit and other subreddits like it.  I’m just not sure how to help. My dms are always open. I listen to other people rant and try to be there for people. I attempt to gove the best advice that I can give.  I would just like to know, what are some things that you guys need to hear? Are there things that I should really try to avoid saying?  Please and thank you!",1.5991509433962283,3.540589858490569,2.7930566037735858,93.9175094339623,79.66037735849056,5.749433962264153,16.260377358490565,6.742157984588678,-0.3530573584905663,399,6,88,4,10,128,66,106,0.081,0.684,0.23399999999999999,0.9508,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,2,0,2,8,8,0,1,1,0,11,0,0,2,1,21,20,5,0,6,5,0,0,2,0,2,0,3,0,1,12,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,3,14,6,11,17,3,4,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,2,2,65,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18465270704453116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15723256674410654,0.0,0.0,0.12850149408699996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18740077427416754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519024712618113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19830527934463865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812707739287658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18710333246410688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21297532324285995,0.0,0.3799742625017005,0.0,0.0,0.187683150459252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384926382768027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846358042175626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011386017646618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262006658403902,0.0,0.0,0.2074249107791339,0.0,0.0,0.1809745652342093,0.0,0.0,0.18081231620131075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421094012893454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502711658124241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780956327423656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739719783555283,0.0,0.0,0.2510775819417133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2565872942613239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114554244148006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423407563063794,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,2016-Depot,2020/03/29,"What happened to my head? It started as slight anxiety for around 2 years. Then this year it all fuckin changed. My anxiety disorder turned into a full on panic disorder. I can hardly talk to my paretns without getting a fuckin frog in my throat. I shake when I talk to my school teachers, I puke at least once a day from the fuckin gut wrenching anxiety. Every moment I feel like I’m crawling out of my own skin, in every situation I just wanna run. My thoughts are becoming irrational. I find myself thinking random thoughts almost delirious thoughts. I can’t go much longer like this, I want my own life back. I want my old depression back and my anxiety disorder back instead of this. I want to go back to where everyday doesn’t feel like mental torture. Like I said I can’t even fuckin talk to my paretns without having a panic attack. It’s awful, I don’t want to die I’m not suicidal. But I need advice I need to stop this panic, I want to be normal. God I just want to go back.",2.9584303721488614,4.882363168367351,4.1381032412965215,85.92958583433376,75.4795918367347,7.264825930372149,27.345738295318128,8.124751697461798,1.8349115246098435,775,31,153,13,17,253,108,196,0.233,0.6409999999999999,0.126,-0.9764,0,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,0,0,12,15,6,4,5,1,8,9,4,0,1,31,32,5,2,10,6,0,4,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,8,4,0,1,7,0,0,5,7,11,0,0,4,5,30,4,25,27,6,29,0,1,0,4,4,9,4,2,19,97,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003210541357387,0.0,0.0,0.09225871492350853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28192848932502657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201863587893808,0.0,0.1048155244105369,0.0,0.35422611361351497,0.0,0.0,0.10175456879772277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09746536811111832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941869372454641,0.0,0.07935472665213614,0.0,0.0956203621075268,0.0,0.31678002940400823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608535210855943,0.0,0.155253438971943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317125833197057,0.13164084296695358,0.0,0.0,0.08420864497863828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04813611977792857,0.0,0.15708532432344996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147363530704975,0.0,0.08253380838441014,0.0,0.09455588289606123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507684382969016,0.18004772802411956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284922336903874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677289608793822,0.13663212450243864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027158457162708,0.0,0.0,0.0966789485482766,0.09811951445762186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32429756946905863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876403640037377,0.0,0.0,0.09324434755707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035622771868148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521279405336321,0.0,0.0,0.07702800141746999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100779448319625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22216103062097486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05903563350867898,0.0,0.2194318917858364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10021514241358262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32605749508155296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17762743493010566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186623224332198
mentalhealth,sorryimavirgo,2020/03/29,"Seeing a psychiatrist I'm a bit conflicted on whether I should book an appointment to see a psychiatrist that I've been referred to. I'm already seeing a counsellor and a psychologist, who I don't see too often because her schedule has changed. 

Last time I saw my psychologist, she brought up the fact that I could have possible mood disorders like bpd/bipolar/depression. I've been seeing her since last November and she has seen me becoming worse because my last session with her I didn't sleep for 3 nights and i spiralled out of control. 

Now where I'm conflicted is that I could just be overreacting. And if I do get the courage to book one, should I go when I'm in a good mood or when I'm a low mood? Because when I'm in a ""good"" mood, I'm in denial about everything I'm going through and it's just a rough patch. But my low mood is a bit more realistic on my thoughts and emotions with a bit of an exaggeration. 

And the GP who wrote the referral note typed something in it that really unsettled me and now I feel like it invalidated me even more.",4.781475741239895,5.515106702830192,6.011940700808626,78.93103773584906,69.23584905660377,10.019407008086256,33.06738544474393,10.125756701596842,3.229998921832884,839,38,173,21,14,282,110,212,0.053,0.888,0.059000000000000004,0.2975,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,12,12,0,0,17,0,15,1,1,1,1,31,37,15,0,5,6,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,9,11,0,3,3,2,0,3,2,2,0,1,8,9,22,5,18,24,5,25,0,2,7,0,8,11,0,4,13,107,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919695133210214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23067854324659465,0.1393100429846752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41313165773589133,0.0,0.15886700217873334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343778841094114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414750331458161,0.20142262752008053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864288956815513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14456562830341987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14188881428390834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833132776087466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336513401306922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377940645085599,0.09011335662343056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590215058263582,0.0,0.14337481217355227,0.2115979479195192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3084590945124905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232497814432021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183724203429049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547469977797292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422021856088233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080754142109657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5025801940734014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434305564936512,0.0,0.1262295775336201,0.0,0.0,0.09710756588183636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013986476833786,0.07355236313421465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854588929735092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Drusinda,2020/03/29,"Because of quarantine I'm going to run out of money I have multiple diagnosed mental and physical health issues.

UK government did what it does and just gave me 0 points and told me to appeal.

My appeal was due April 3rd, and I had just about enough savings to last until then but this is soon to run out.

Social landlord and maybe the people I owe finance to say 'We don't see how this is coronavirus related as you have managed until now and your finances haven't changed' like erm, what finances?

I needed the appeal to get the money I am owed but now they are no longer doing it.

I've already fully exhausted trying to get help from:

- UK mental health services
- Citizens Advice
- My local council
- Currently appealing for all my repayments to be frozen for at least 3 months or until my appeal
- Went to A&E for suicidal plans and self harm due to all this

No one can do or will do anything at all to help because coronavirus.",5.459500000000002,6.4320972833333325,6.124444444444446,77.87000000000003,67.83333333333334,9.111111111111112,30.555555555555557,9.2995712137729,2.757555555555556,741,28,132,14,12,242,114,180,0.122,0.841,0.037000000000000005,-0.9539,3,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,2,1,1,7,4,0,0,3,0,17,4,0,1,3,22,28,17,1,1,6,0,0,1,0,1,4,1,1,2,7,10,0,0,0,0,7,4,4,2,0,1,6,2,15,2,26,20,5,23,0,0,1,0,12,6,0,2,14,94,22,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16725823162431966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888823206904115,0.0,0.0,0.1854547384953777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408523367433103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20867841412199908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810674652113736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17372656055691887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14978565204847075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17685684719170355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17885091622213511,0.0,0.09727571973642392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638759405240901,0.0,0.0,0.2294535300926212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17864941298974674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13952046375540952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083621460530541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719559607495332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449835330865314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662045224275166,0.0,0.0,0.12691499006034745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159842906031835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866268049854654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618040975986431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611546703103355,0.0,0.0,0.1363945294507735,0.0,0.17856004894126687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744788407259814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872242377603404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355331652275645,0.0,0.11620825327263735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15866955871543606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dedcells,2020/03/29,"I’m slowly losing everything I think I’m losing motivation and will to live. Everyone’s trying to improve their life, fighting for better. All the people around me has strong will to move forward. My parents are doing their best to support our family and my best friend is working hard to achieve her goal. I appreciate it and feel proud of them. And I remind myself that I should do my best too. Unfortunately, I’m losing my motivation. I feel so void on the inside. Even when shitty things happen and random strangers do something that’s really offensive to me, I don’t really react to it and move on. Even when something really exciting n nice happens, I don’t really feel the happiness like I used to have before. Whatever happens, I feel stuck and unmotivated. There has been this thought of just throwing my life away in my head lately. I used to care about things and react to certain circumstances like a normal human, but now I just feel so unmotivated, stuck, emotionless and ready to give up my life anytime. I want to build strong will to live for myself. 

English is not my first language, sorry if there’s any grammar mistake.",4.631314553990613,6.846957600938964,5.589319248826296,76.06642018779345,71.58215962441315,8.301408450704226,27.795774647887324,8.998388855275968,2.520340845070422,911,34,155,19,18,299,120,213,0.121,0.6709999999999999,0.20800000000000002,0.9536,1,0,2,0,2,0,24.0,1,0,3,16,14,22,2,0,4,0,16,4,1,6,2,35,37,15,0,5,5,1,6,2,1,4,3,0,0,1,7,10,0,0,9,0,0,4,3,6,0,1,4,6,29,16,24,29,4,15,0,3,0,0,10,7,0,2,8,109,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397438500928301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683759622936204,0.0,0.0,0.1022027428274742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256408678560246,0.0,0.3424748759811761,0.09620740144662772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090884180153301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14369682306640305,0.0,0.0,0.10394430967167274,0.09776478654865008,0.0,0.10254845602747943,0.0,0.27501312957247903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252853111843096,0.0,0.0,0.08404344762375902,0.0,0.0,0.10435204755252572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885823781871169,0.11579873159231613,0.09744584905554914,0.0,0.11164004754376776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227090007602227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23050438692844966,0.10628919270340484,0.0,0.1921101275537289,0.0,0.0,0.36509224291925024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312326459377137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658167090994923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12078773277458107,0.0,0.0,0.07541461506526842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787499739609163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16748889388870186,0.0,0.12177072345552307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12344268006256245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14453769464486793,0.06970207172545906,0.0,0.08635946659718663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385473386529905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18790263454072667,0.0,0.0,0.06416148337895165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919340832315548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stormebreaker,2020/03/29,"Does anyone else ever have those moments where you cry over childish things Like when a plate of food falls down, you hang up after a conversation with your mother, or when you eat a bowl of cereal cause you always ate it when you where little?",5.944822695035462,6.7057727021276605,5.583829787234047,82.93333333333334,66.65957446808511,7.9687943262411345,22.04964539007092,7.793537801064563,0.8214879432624111,195,3,37,2,3,60,37,47,0.109,0.84,0.051,-0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,6,0,0,6,1,0,0,3,0,1,3,0,1,1,4,2,4,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,1,7,1,0,14,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,1,7,27,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512394997680052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21112450362471735,0.3093747285216569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31017707403815475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3316685382024924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26423102429575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3089615142808595,0.2522333626373852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27312335554944794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36510883669189387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751335569805704,0.30262468629110184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20059650298992776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ronttimaestro,2020/03/29,"treating panic disorder without medication * **Hi everybody.**

Im 21 years old pretty ordinary guy. I have never had any problems with mental health, until now. I have had some pretty dark times with depression but somehow managed to get myself up from there without medication and im really happy about that :) (**ask me how if you want to know**)

But now, the real problem is my panic attacks. Before this covid pandemia i went to work and live abroad to other country. I wanted to experience everything and meet nice people all around the world. It was amazing, i loved it. But i got my first panic attack in other country and i didnt know what was happening. I was panicking so hard that i called ambulance for myself haha. 

**Can you imagine, calling ambulance in other country that most of them does not even speak good english haha.**

So, when the ambulance finally arrived i was still on full panic mode. They tested my heart rates etc and everything seemd fine, So i was wondering what the h\*\*\*\*. Then i discovered panic attacks. 

I have recently gotten a lot of panic attacks. Like once or twice a week and they are getting worse. Is there anybody who has been succesfully treating panic disorder without ssri? I dont want to get on that medication.

Btw if you want to hear that full ambulance story and afterwards please let me know haha.

Help me fellow beautiful humans.

Stay safe! 

**Thanks,**",2.1390541410056088,4.921021565217393,3.6350859453993927,79.4804145601618,96.19367588932806,6.306057542053497,24.856052946042837,7.485028197883463,2.2455170328155165,1108,48,173,25,43,363,156,253,0.212,0.596,0.192,-0.8584,0,0,0,0,0,0,56.0,0,3,3,2,14,28,4,7,6,3,19,6,1,1,2,40,38,20,0,8,10,0,1,1,1,0,4,2,0,2,14,10,0,1,5,0,0,1,7,14,0,2,12,3,28,14,24,25,7,26,0,1,0,1,19,9,0,8,16,128,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050609410307514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625122520653796,0.06957438391475806,0.3386623948788243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332751326401727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519860602447716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409943070004154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17058777633541886,0.0,0.06512706280699777,0.0,0.08722185440640247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300003572619956,0.049154930301490325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377112078583034,0.07279885012685318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152549940434241,0.0,0.06330318793372336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664703555970875,0.0,0.0,0.062421517196620264,0.059521952332087576,0.0,0.0,0.0736893324848676,0.06581099652876332,0.07922344362186692,0.06666736001924839,0.0,0.0,0.07910694685495995,0.08387883421865792,0.08819025105389043,0.049883397579341314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16077673857612815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270090804461815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761013842709193,0.0,0.036358756913666815,0.0,0.06571585737668137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06327079586142698,0.06716862561105362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249165541134822,0.07499972099943167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057398718991752064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078093212894412,0.07925684181193954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6112260445450514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051594740484053256,0.0,0.0,0.08169284327942053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142755399450536,0.0,0.14242331988900744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847083587743004,0.04767654304806497,0.0,0.07348259895327916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793237903865051,0.05943338586585015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06851764095944164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043395979454212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558374228358192,0.0,0.05969671933586013,0.0,0.0,0.06898980092348787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21522002411349653,0.08070732213763357,0.054179993452789316,0.0,0.07584222359643446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047925231642829975
mentalhealth,oudak2019,2020/03/29,"How to keep your sanity during the Corona crisis   
Practical tips and tricks I learned coping with loneliness and stress throughout my life   
[https://medium.com/invisible-illness/how-to-keep-your-sanity-during-the-corona-crises-e99271b5d2b3](https://medium.com/invisible-illness/how-to-keep-your-sanity-during-the-corona-crises-e99271b5d2b3)",51.99625000000001,59.649449458333336,28.67833333333333,-67.79999999999995,-28.916666666666657,16.26666666666667,44.83333333333333,14.554592549557764,7.021133333333334,313,5,15,4,1,71,23,24,0.371,0.629,0.0,-0.8807,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8927484452711777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23647690977728195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835086499781752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yikesriley,2020/03/29,"I’m a mess, and just need to vent. Any support is highly appreciated. I (21m) had one of the worst days I’ve had in a LONG time yesterday. 

Let me give you a little backstory. I’ve been mentally ill my whole life, and throughout middle and highschool, and early adulthood, I was in and out of psych units. I’m diagnosed borderline, osdd, schizoaffective, and a whole other laundry list of things. 

I don’t know what happened or what triggered it, but I woke up into one of the worst panic attacks of my life yesterday. The physical symptoms were ridiculous and lasted for hours, and mentally it was just turmoil. Intense intrusive thoughts and sh/suicidal urges, just general spiraling.... it was bad. At about 2pm I took as many sleeping meds as I safely could, and tried to pass the fuck out. I ended up waking up several times, but managed to sleep mostly until about 6am. 

Now onto today. I feel like fucking garbage. No trigger, at least not an apparent one (I’m usually pretty good at identifying triggers). I’m not panicking anymore thank god, but the depression is hitting HARD. I mean hard. To the point where if I actually could, I’d probably go inpatient again (but for several reasons including the current pandemic, I can’t). 

I’m physically safe. I know I can keep myself from doing stupid shit. But man those thoughts will NOT leave my head. I just, I can’t even describe really WHAT it is. Dread, severe depression, I don’t know... but what I do know is that I cannot manage this. 

I’m quarantined at the minute and am not allowed to visit any friends or family, which is what I’d usually do when feeling like this. I don’t have the energy to talk directly to friends online at the moment. I can’t bring myself to do anything, and I’m not enjoying anything; nor is anything distracting me. I’ve tried basically everything I’ve learned through years of therapy and DBT, yet nothing is working. 

I’m struggling so fucking much. I can’t eat because I’m nauseous, I can’t think properly because I have a migraine, I can’t distract myself because of intrusive thoughts. It’s just absolute hell. I feel at a complete loss. 

It’s at this point I really wish I wasn’t over 5 yrs clean of sh or over 6 years clean of suicide attempts, so i could actually fucking feel something that isn’t this. 

Idk. Thanks for listening. If you have any thoughts or advice, please share, I’ll take anything at this point",3.5548079860928183,5.720833734341255,4.8703018490228125,80.25845598693569,74.50755939524838,8.404762155612918,31.379076015382186,9.114032605525557,3.041214339145552,1901,93,348,45,41,630,234,463,0.196,0.6659999999999999,0.138,-0.9889,3,1,1,0,0,1,75.0,0,2,0,3,15,34,9,6,17,0,40,16,5,5,0,68,82,32,1,7,22,0,6,2,2,1,6,1,2,1,22,16,1,3,16,0,0,5,19,22,0,3,14,7,38,12,46,62,7,53,1,3,0,4,10,26,6,7,24,218,60,6,0.0,0.0,0.14717838929706825,0.0,0.0,0.07368969179000981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384397519084048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747863679796597,0.0,0.0,0.2482237240396133,0.0,0.0,0.08578965973460638,0.0,0.0,0.0629641254027613,0.1379075445543773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906585643737551,0.0,0.0,0.1806260321487138,0.0,0.0,0.048633153773461286,0.0,0.12990089084809428,0.07653947180269252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771631645577254,0.0,0.0,0.06679079786562253,0.0,0.0,0.04980753468482396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777356510834083,0.0,0.07108975231976475,0.0,0.15251806627494827,0.10774571027358608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652301959711918,0.278860988513873,0.0,0.07234005758781491,0.04285718996556808,0.06325025513779918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668473481997443,0.0,0.13510493560413755,0.0,0.07739232394417048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967471074643802,0.0,0.0,0.07426357168379427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06702779333842103,0.0,0.0,0.1657732587096198,0.06146914189328578,0.0,0.07984820689981807,0.0,0.07711174267542413,0.10652849986008364,0.0736829463480955,0.07558054122651278,0.0,0.06673539779089192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645381320485191,0.0,0.08214349971946272,0.08376341063049256,0.0,0.15199090639003734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055434961001221215,0.05591549312852664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235784295200183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329912095857884,0.0,0.0,0.08847728201196876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277743657014726,0.2138602202106089,0.0,0.0,0.07671898934205901,0.08130463793922675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09661903930914542,0.0775339475083437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555752028999387,0.07740718947018424,0.0,0.0,0.15092874129336625,0.0,0.0,0.05805423330639215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883481171323042,0.0,0.16497240515094586,0.08557427280020671,0.0,0.07837977096014534,0.056698867825242735,0.0606116295922379,0.0,0.13885462791537045,0.08623780470839182,0.0,0.05009899374018886,0.048319625736827916,0.0,0.2394681823085033,0.08794425049899986,0.0,0.0714797777151927,0.0,0.08378318526835901,0.10239675840110844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661067251922901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16838494408512586,0.08671767549528013,0.0,0.0,0.054899312979831874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712301991631972
mentalhealth,Throwthrowatgrowaway,2020/03/29,"Confused right now, what’s wrong? I’m confused really. I love learning so I decided not to ignore the questions I’ve been facing recently. I need answers.

Situation:

My bully’s brother killed himself. I don’t feel bad. 

That sounds awful, right? Well my brain can justify it.
My bully is awful and made it their mission to isolate me. The mother threatened to call the police on me for defending myself when my bully attacked me. 

I don’t know the brother. So I can’t find a reason to miss him. 

The bully? I saw a video of him crying because of it. I couldn’t help but feel good. I hate him so fucking much. I also noticed he got massively fat. That’s a bonus point. 

I’ll answer any questions if it can help find out why I lack any emotion for the family. I’m really curious.",0.4119930069930078,2.8675905256410275,2.9844289044289063,86.2954195804196,92.46153846153842,5.4004662004662025,22.475524475524484,6.980632752743323,1.1567538461538458,606,24,114,10,22,209,96,156,0.22699999999999998,0.634,0.139,-0.8271,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,1,7,14,4,2,9,2,8,5,3,2,0,24,21,8,1,4,3,3,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,2,1,1,12,1,1,0,5,10,1,0,4,4,24,4,10,16,2,8,0,1,1,2,15,5,1,5,3,71,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333233241599957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20975429080864186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754512896656328,0.0,0.0,0.12877002938067186,0.09401310376074712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17216422862163505,0.15747925181173464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16940707405763553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734804758867755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538801954802236,0.0,0.1559598878701096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819146389923943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257697321433702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935520282907326,0.1233464767036533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15226359847502385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20674527955973387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706252522924038,0.0,0.08475710278678505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919256660006907,0.1459298333200679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337188456413627,0.11435463681798973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558427076861402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14579088575555407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3455308256961234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975988144198905,0.15856725770085955,0.1522769217875327,0.0,0.0,0.2634117433809402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17335347216284874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866528517950616,0.0,0.13916255741693825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16861898885001705,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1stdayonEarth,2020/03/29,"What you do when you feel mood swings Hi. So I have this problem were I tend to be overly affected by whatever thought/feeling I have either creating from external sources or internal sources. I don't show my mood swings, I try to show always I am the same as always. These are just feelings I feel inside and try to keep them in order to cause unnecessary stress to other people. So I guess there are 3 states that are predominant in me: a state of over happiness and excitement (this is most of the times a good thing, but it's never a durable feeling and it's doesn't happen that much often , or it's a feeling of despair and hopelessness (this doesn't happen everyday, but surely is more common than the happiness one [and tends to last a bit longer]). And there's the most common: the normal feeling (I don't feel great, don't feel completely relaxed either, feel slightly sad but not that much, but I feel like this is a state I can familiarize with and this overall allows me to be more stable through the day [and this is where I feel I can go either way depending if the events that happen around me are too stressful or big]). A plus is that when I see something funny enough I can still laugh so it's not all bad.
But I feel this process has to change. So I was 2 weeks of work and I tried to improve a bit on this. I did some things and applied some habits, but there were some days I couldn't do what I intended (lack of motivation). And if I am home and this happens, what if I go back to work. This is clearly not a good sign.
So with that said, I would like to ask what do you recommend me to do to minimize these mood swings effects without resorting to medication?",3.2094071882533406,4.7810507603550345,4.1295003287310985,87.7529640587333,73.94082840236686,7.492614507999124,25.83212798597414,8.167268648758528,1.4672383081306162,1319,45,277,21,27,425,162,338,0.099,0.7490000000000001,0.152,0.9657,0,0,1,0,0,1,37.0,0,3,1,4,17,21,0,2,16,0,35,1,0,7,4,74,60,33,0,8,20,0,12,2,0,1,1,1,1,0,29,16,0,1,14,3,0,2,11,7,0,1,5,14,33,11,34,51,18,29,0,3,1,0,7,8,0,14,16,208,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558028212076888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322482092545448,0.08739937449086069,0.0,0.0,0.07188708896870323,0.0780592130960025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20413103430273816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603871351999127,0.0988987163777534,0.0,0.09802119058724144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205850375797259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659888456193667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6145194667697074,0.06678839183921352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626363831209272,0.15682787976791202,0.0,0.10307169259766356,0.10298841380558657,0.0,0.3306872217959543,0.19904105585890516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377685312128023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309710918861056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762058206190216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09134777579670893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941800944355346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744999731460242,0.0,0.0721042983665098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159913939217243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335040614418815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481333777744057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945612142582415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892922348548518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449844105279863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197221814487355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466024787101884,0.0,0.2141821270985209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811205388394082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242195616391169,0.0,0.0,0.07421963599494412,0.05451405023382247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904182024266188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420702949461543,0.07499104750252658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011983255443323,0.0,0.1361218675969696,0.0,0.0,0.06641173577870778,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SnoopSquirrel,2020/03/29,"Cause and reaction Ive always battled with depression. It was manageable all throughout my teen years using drugs and alcohol to cope while having the ability to be at school to keep my mind off things really helped me along and it was more or less just kind of a shadow that followed me around but if I told it to go away hard enough hit would listen and leave me be for actually quite some time. (months at the most)

​

About a year after I graduated, I was in a horrible car accident where I was thrown from the vehicle and experienced a traumatic brain injury. The medics and my family said I was alive the whole time and trying to fight off the EMTs as they strapped me on the gurney rolling in to the hospital from the helicopter. But what I remember was being dead. I couldn't tell how long or where I was at, but I knew for sure that I was no longer living. After what seemed like literally eons, living in this dark eternal hole of nothingness; I was suddenly ripped back into life with a sudden and huge breath and it felt like I had been in a coma for years upon years but it was only 24 hours. I woke up and all my family was around me and I was grateful to be alive and well. 

Fast forward 5 years and I'm finding it harder and harder to be grateful. Don't get me wrong, I'm happy to be here to make my family and friends happy when ever possible. But I just cannot get myself out of this sinkhole. My anxiety is so high ill be awake for 36 hours straight just sitting in my house panicking about life and my future, and then my depression drags me back down and I sleep for two days, all the while my family and friends are wondering where I've gone and if I'm ok. I've suffered things from the wreck that I've never told anybody about. I've never told anybody but Reddit, just now, that I died; and the second worst thing ill reveal, is that i don't feel like i actually survived the wreck. Coupled with making me forget all the faces and memories of past friends and family from before the event, it has completely crushed who I am as a person. 

I had BEST friends that I had spent my ENTIRETY of my childhood, middle school, and high school career with that, after the wreck, I would see them in the flesh, and I would feel so awkward and uneasy as If I was talking to a complete stranger. This has devastated me and even my family has noticed these occurrences. ""what is wrong Anon? don't you remember Anon2 and all the good times you had in high school?"" and I would just freeze and begin to panic and have to turn away and leave the situation.  

Long story short, TL;DR, Call it whatever you want. 

I died in a car wreck and life hasn't been the same. What can I do to cope? Because I'm not making it on my own.",4.497394456500295,5.3239214470802905,5.216143223515483,84.0450927204577,69.93065693430657,8.771039652791478,26.307161175774322,8.994212911058018,1.8201266916551584,2155,63,444,39,37,698,252,548,0.182,0.6759999999999999,0.141,-0.9827,1,1,2,0,1,0,52.0,0,3,2,3,24,25,2,2,29,1,49,14,5,6,9,96,81,54,3,9,17,0,5,3,4,4,9,2,0,1,28,42,1,1,10,0,1,6,11,10,1,2,28,9,58,15,66,40,15,77,0,3,1,0,21,35,0,9,40,317,86,7,0.0,0.0,0.1316340502203865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207866913969131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05612001310742608,0.0730771113820496,0.08195359783800328,0.0,0.0,0.05159558075018378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008149046995985,0.0,0.0,0.1267344313232748,0.10372276795453317,0.0,0.04111411721141567,0.0,0.057391106027039215,0.0,0.07077983338022463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529142206789127,0.06886934010636314,0.0,0.0,0.06928505062586929,0.0,0.0,0.1414305315706112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462710196053438,0.0,0.043496732344787965,0.0,0.11618132574516225,0.0,0.13999544710908396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821530358451358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968917389634867,0.0,0.0445470802702035,0.06100826624608317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3814893778240779,0.0,0.06820488691118153,0.048183039320253536,0.06475820397217788,0.0,0.061643914770882366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20843273372857604,0.0,0.07047492251524405,0.0,0.03833080062348943,0.05657003926341491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435938605002252,0.06041787100428401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04520726003450398,0.21377944667927495,0.0,0.0,0.13284035477298942,0.07782298802787249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994861036739961,0.0,0.07023405208952993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14282997561338082,0.0,0.0,0.14291613701703978,0.09885131274667834,0.0,0.11911112702749628,0.11937419272271822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506107460053912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679441901265876,0.0,0.0,0.0681006728244378,0.0,0.053834310660433135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403616998943883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678708605593189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05129530006253348,0.0,0.07913269766948587,0.0,0.0,0.06438430877817751,0.0,0.058890761003709935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603460527220436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173653268616284,0.0,0.0,0.04320727904894558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15280508275960553,0.0,0.06415606296130283,0.0,0.0,0.2730335639592668,0.053745287402429176,0.061399799972703964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581150593269814,0.06749415320414315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06356653364403289,0.0,0.0,0.054210093830963264,0.05895029163004153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344232700768838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798394392752945,0.0,0.0,0.1933410387689012,0.0,0.04579102985890873,0.07336127661550483,0.06588439947105358,0.0,0.0,0.05825120949264414,0.0,0.0,0.03978107085939812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06064155484679309,0.0,0.0,0.07530043062680787,0.0,0.0,0.07314170797531024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19164523584009965,0.14748201249248705,0.08195359783800328,0.21716327618274686
mentalhealth,Lil_Bean_Boi,2020/03/29,"Wrong thoughts whenever I pick up something Whenever I pick up a knife or a fork, I immediately think of stabbing myself/someone else with it. In fact don't really think it, it's just the thought that goes through my mind for a few seconds. It also happens when I pick up glassware, where when I pick it up, the thought of breaking it goes through my mind.",6.294571428571429,6.195894028571433,6.237857142857145,81.50964285714288,65.85714285714286,9.285714285714286,38.92857142857143,8.841846274778883,3.2732857142857146,282,15,57,4,4,89,43,70,0.051,0.9490000000000001,0.0,-0.4767,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,4,1,15,7,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,7,0,11,4,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,1,2,39,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19730074184348784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061016971295485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181724062023376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49823082442341105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15805422596297414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090438337180652,0.18993599966890173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161745800522384,0.0,0.5876009294052507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697480128470457,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoogetFooget,2020/03/29,"I think i have bipolar disorder Ive been doing research on bipolar disorder and the more i do the more scared im getting. Its been pretty much 100% accurate and it’s freaking me out. I cant go to a therapist about this cause i dont wanna tell my parents that i think im bipolar causes i dont wanna worry them or if im horribly wrong i dont wanna waste their time and money but i cant afford to go by myself.
I also dont want to be put on stabilizers because those apparently mess with you really hard and you start shaking and what not but in freaking out without a proper diagnosis someone please help me",1.339561298076923,3.473360804687502,4.198437500000002,82.49896634615384,81.578125,6.750961538461539,25.47115384615385,7.882392219407189,1.7314331730769237,485,20,95,9,13,173,80,128,0.19399999999999998,0.71,0.096,-0.8537,3,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,2,0,2,6,0,2,4,0,13,3,0,2,0,22,20,10,0,5,6,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,2,0,1,4,8,6,0,0,2,1,19,0,15,17,3,11,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,2,2,70,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236186778511007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802785132422434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26298332523727985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933990789024678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6000620277196324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687492215665097,0.0,0.14549114586644607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466321000659792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579596508443109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4147871672331368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409501653758877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421292882517496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405059933718655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022241633270218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867574859434228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200032919153401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815072292696106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845431734522083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059933675701116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187798505257422,0.0,0.0,0.14861832153695606,0.0,0.16403496640673249,0.0,0.0,0.07463805832664826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549794798156799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233878108438966,0.0,0.0,0.12999061205877005,0.0,0.0,0.13994833556302125,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kelslogan,2020/03/29,Does everyone play out super sad and depressing scenarios in their head or is it just me? Within the last couple of months I have been making up super sad scenarios in my head and I can’t stop doing it. They almost always have to do with my husband or someone in my immediate family dying. I’m finding myself almost obsessing over these made up stories and I can get so into them that I break down and start sobbing. I been struggling with bipolar and depression for the last year or so but this whole making up stories in my head has only been going on for probably 2-3 months. Does anyone else do this and doesn’t know why?,5.2739516129032245,5.95199768548387,6.3469354838709675,77.16540322580649,68.11290322580646,9.103225806451613,28.403225806451612,9.188382445141503,2.3948258064516126,499,16,91,9,8,167,81,124,0.12300000000000001,0.825,0.052000000000000005,-0.7062,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,3,2,3,10,0,2,2,0,13,4,3,3,0,23,21,12,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,10,0,1,2,1,0,1,2,7,0,0,4,0,14,3,19,17,1,22,0,5,0,0,4,13,1,5,7,68,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040096777603188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630898462014847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061414375760785,0.155536083548917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16796278104454124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26148862899592457,0.0,0.15754346619577178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656807740403579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680864255609794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450505143061772,0.0,0.0,0.14310265117036988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13874159772230735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930874755004477,0.0,0.08627090833287153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4673689121955661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342479766912453,0.2474730009053984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436359481191926,0.20265411273567974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24232913503525774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154500312443281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636650693227354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861885737820064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744416135890307,0.0,0.0,0.12691081763311804,0.0,0.1586933445756804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369750476822117,0.16947823792780756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977536226120304
mentalhealth,khai-kunni-ko-ho,2020/03/29,"I don't like who I am and I can't change. Sometimes I am at my best but 95% of times, I try too hard. But, at the end of the day, I am alone. I feel alone and can't focus on the tasks at hand. I really don't like this version of me but also can't change. Wtf is wrong with me?",-2.233091684434968,-0.9014234776119388,0.9995735607675942,104.94388059701494,89.74626865671641,4.4255863539445635,12.556503198294244,5.288315135182226,-1.6246571428571426,205,2,62,1,7,73,38,67,0.21100000000000002,0.634,0.155,-0.2411,0,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,0,9,1,1,0,0,7,10,6,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,3,11,3,8,10,2,7,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,5,41,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5008280463706244,0.0,0.19335358712360587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537360915220683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5115482051136355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592987906399336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141477618804428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225262904040017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165898634482328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362456888289835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15489222830306704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23912933362350355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098547267322944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641546241109978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643514941510713,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Global-Flower,2020/03/29,"[question] am I fine or should I do something? To begin with, I want no one to worry about me as I am more or less fine, it's just me making sure.

So, every day I sleep for 10+ hours if there are no chores (such as going to a class) (but even then for online ones i caught them last minute). I don't even sleep sometimes just lie in bed and do nothing. I am also weird when it comes to organization as for example I can clean my entire house but then not have the motivation to pick up one small object which will lie on the floor for a long time. I will sometimes but rarely just lie down in the middle of the room or my bed doing nothing.

Sometimes I have negative thoughts like whats the point of it all and whats the point of me being here but its on more of a logical sense and I won't act on them (like seriously, there is no need to worry and its very philosophical and not a big deal but just in case).

Sometimes I will also find it really hard to do basic every day tasks (eg taking a shower brushing teeth etc) and would sometimes procrastinate on stupid things (eg getting water even tho im thirsty)

Ive also had not the best of childhoods so possibly could be ptsd from there or something but I doubt it, it's just the lack of motivation that's really annoying me.

However, I am in a healthy shape, do enough exercise and am doing alright in life.

Am I just being lazy or should I do something?

If I should do something, what can I do, I would prefer not to go to my doctor but if I do what can I expect. Is there anything I can do by myself (as I doubt I would want to tell all that to my doctor)? (UK)",2.502573964497042,3.6856584881656858,4.1078106508875765,88.76603550295862,75.06508875739645,6.975147928994082,22.76331360946745,7.468242284971852,0.7244284023668639,1251,33,279,15,26,419,160,338,0.139,0.792,0.069,-0.9797,2,0,4,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,2,3,23,13,2,2,14,1,43,8,3,4,3,60,55,35,0,16,25,0,1,2,0,10,4,0,6,0,16,9,1,0,7,1,0,5,10,6,0,3,3,2,37,7,40,38,9,35,0,0,0,0,5,19,0,11,13,215,53,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344515712400145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08041922126047689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025561963492638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418130136468566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802533729586242,0.0,0.0,0.12604888171861053,0.10075002476530888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000510409257912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097588903803158,0.10898903527845813,0.19363901662929744,0.0,0.16467479456972325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931873847482391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05105719839962121,0.0,0.1110785636877573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754226657237403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09623928777862102,0.11276135107295684,0.0,0.0,0.10555960295266377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796587923532871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902594853848518,0.09548684660851678,0.0,0.0,0.08648341316473368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523209330670462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246173477075135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875392500793918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19866265362189375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18476313317187595,0.1101700800247096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142351149417596,0.0,0.10947419249191473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252100770019369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955908426980089,0.0,0.0,0.3009334422928269,0.4832618557503809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921045104842098,0.0,0.07347692190983428,0.0,0.08541582248123843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06492404508243589,0.0,0.0,0.0775826114623856,0.05698414337170455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080633232222011,0.11528129183701286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19848864883688674,0.0,0.20826277942725624,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Witty-Article,2020/03/29,"If being in quarantine stopped my overeating what kind of anxiety do I have? I was a skinny kid, when I went to kindergarten I started to put on weight and the more I stress the more I gain. Being in isolation for 3 weeks now I have lost a ton of weight without dieting, and found myself being centered and content. Much more emotionally stable than in normal life situations. Since I was a child I always had a strong sense of shame, but I guess that's common for shy kids (now I'm not shy). 
Based on this information what kind of anxiety could I have had in childhood? Do you have any readings that could be helpful?",3.615702479338843,5.46774548760331,4.537264462809919,84.08407851239672,73.46280991735537,7.484628099173554,26.97603305785124,8.238735603445708,1.7895249586776862,488,18,95,8,10,158,77,121,0.13699999999999998,0.778,0.085,-0.4831,0,2,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,3,3,6,0,2,6,0,16,5,1,0,0,14,22,6,0,4,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,5,3,4,1,2,1,0,2,2,3,0,0,7,2,14,3,17,9,5,18,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,2,8,72,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586922866738058,0.0,0.0,0.11921457630074105,0.0,0.26821831107801203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799362908398767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19719645638296326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19221476219617045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19312010852167602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750439435528573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3651099291396528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382431576231336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19136798585781892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12887060503625408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17176335751030755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762316665114935,0.0,0.0,0.17535415339415306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450155244870397,0.1970520903718731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408299369494487,0.0,0.0,0.14656426170602346,0.20081324733649814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406204707568426,0.4269526968369031,0.0,0.1625110791884681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16898941540862286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kwtkuwait71,2020/03/29,"I spend 8 to 10 hours a day on my phone. How can I cure this sickness? Good news, I spend 0 hours a day on video games and TV.


I know this shit fuccs with my head even if I'm not aware of it. It's worse than drugs and so widely accepted. Between the physical damage it does to the eyes and the brain......and the social media, porn and etc. We are in for a rude awakening because my generation was born and raised into this.


I'm literally thinking of getting rid of my phone to replace it with a flip phone. A third of my life on something that brought me no benefit...sad",1.8007500000000007,3.244044241666668,3.4466666666666685,91.725,77.41666666666666,6.8000000000000025,23.666666666666664,7.554174236665415,0.8325666666666662,439,14,102,6,10,146,80,120,0.133,0.8220000000000001,0.045,-0.8878,0,0,2,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,0,3,5,2,0,9,0,3,7,3,1,0,16,9,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,3,3,2,1,2,3,0,1,2,1,11,2,17,7,1,12,0,1,1,1,6,6,1,1,5,61,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14401529040650202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637321861605044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30472231755126794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067432251605721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739740124306705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634802543656771,0.15604033692091068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343043120953255,0.0,0.0,0.1981545801150232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424597880573319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4653156523332316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12983635560970644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16686976292877514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425063597598338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24082625912857214,0.0,0.18187613946639974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15137891741837745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24075806943947325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DeepDishCrypto,2020/03/29,"Has anyone experienced this before?!!!! Someone please help me I need your guidance!

Tl;dr! My wife has delusions so strong she is metaphysically connected to a celebrity crush that she has never directly talked to or had any contact whatsoever. She wants to divorce me and we have four kids.

I’m completely lost with what to do here!!!

My wife(36) and I (39) have been married for 8 years together. We have had a tough go at it raising 4 kids. It hasn’t been easy for any of us. I’ve always loved her and wanted the best for her. Last week she told me that she wanted a divorce and it was because she was in love with someone else and that someone was a celebrity (tall and has Abs)

Naturally I went off the deep end because we have a house, kids, cars ... etc. I spent a few days away very angry and I came back home to face her and get the full story so that I could get some closure.

When I got home immediately I asked her to explain it. Expecting a specific response... I got something completely different. She told me that he’s been obsessed with her since 2013. I asked her how she knew that... and she said that they hadn’t actually met in person. I asked her if they just texted.. to which she replied... their communication is more subtle than this. When I asked for more elaboration, she was hesitant... but showed me that his communication to her was at first through Instagram posts. She started showing me subtle messages he was leaving her in every post to make is seem like he not only knew her but understood her deeply.

I was extremely shocked at this... but I played along and got her to explain it more to me. She told me that he is an expert hacker and can go into her phone and show her things. I asked her to elaborate and she said she would bring up safari and the first website would have been related to something she was thinking about and that this guy was sending her a message.

I continued to speak to her about this. This celebrity also talks to her telepathically. She even asked him if it was ok for us to speak about the subject in the first place in which she replied “He said yes and really likes you”.  He can send messages to her through the universe, in the form of songs and words or symbols. They are subtle but she can pick them up.

She also told me that she spent 3 hours at Costco walking around talking to him in a one sided conversation where he would answer her by chirping her ear phone bud. She told me she saw a video he posted about different houses he could live in and went to investigate a 25M household nearby. She phoned the realtor and took his email address and DM’d that guy to which he never returned anything. She told my kids that they were going to move into the household and that a new guy would be showing up soon.

All this from symbols and mental connections. None of it from any concrete communication. I asked her if he actually liked you, why not just DM you? Her reply was “if he replies then the world will know so he must be more discrete”. I asked if they have ever video talked and she said that she viewed a video interview between him and another couple and she laughed because it was like being on a date with him.

At this point I’m very worried. Does my wife have a mental illness? I have been through the gambit of emotions so far. I thought she was cheating on me... and I was so emotionally destroyed that I didn’t think I was going to make it... and I come home to find out she’s delusional or perhaps sick. Her delusion is that a very famous celebrity who dates many girls has a special mental and metaphysical connection with her that transcends the body... and that she doesn’t love me anymore and that I should move on.

WHAT THE FUCKING HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO? I’ve never been so lost in my life. She’s my wife and the love of my life, the mother of my kids and the object of my affections, but she won’t even touch me and promises me that if I’m civil and help to take care of the kids... she will move out with this celebrity crush and help to pay for everything with all the money she will have. She even told our kids that she had so much money that money wouldn’t matter anymore. Someone please reach out to me so I don’t feel so alone.",4.289657039711194,5.525729232250303,4.692847773766548,86.0855532490975,70.7569193742479,7.51352587244284,27.68874849578821,7.851483349538662,1.5262916004813478,3316,115,677,41,60,1048,331,831,0.06,0.8420000000000001,0.09699999999999999,0.985,3,1,2,0,2,0,98.0,6,4,7,7,29,25,4,1,37,2,72,12,3,5,7,113,140,64,0,20,18,4,2,4,1,11,4,8,4,12,48,54,0,0,13,9,6,17,13,9,0,5,55,13,136,16,90,69,14,81,1,2,2,5,165,37,2,11,28,481,184,2,0.0,0.0,0.10354307291181372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054946336469444065,0.0,0.08485204718591625,0.044143886777512686,0.0,0.0,0.10823245189941597,0.055630117580301314,0.0,0.0,0.10522754583076396,0.03709550525524074,0.0,0.043657644439902124,0.04722792659753888,0.3967750194930337,0.0,0.04984452138703084,0.040794057870856534,0.0,0.09702083987385726,0.0,0.045143725851314966,0.0,0.055675271224311235,0.0,0.0,0.05892931004122661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067786731400075,0.0540905066170224,0.0,0.0,0.045699986469203716,0.11124896497414308,0.0,0.0,0.08471612581108938,0.05870152476931269,0.0,0.034214440116836234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11085703329146884,0.0,0.0,0.04642655486254554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044318512861463655,0.11935372693778935,0.046988722232035776,0.0,0.059167503433328536,0.10512192489793368,0.04798897663306274,0.044698975673072,0.0,0.0476801195272102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02682491181636811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04848897645407695,0.13537915580295082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049046133409695436,0.05543542896562946,0.0,0.12060371543931996,0.0,0.12729266758094435,0.0,0.0,0.1575907935936643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667981302844602,0.0,0.15964779328490292,0.0,0.05224597479475193,0.12243080434118922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029156238044488907,0.04324482603241736,0.0,0.05617488238859358,0.0,0.0,0.07494502610661807,0.10367498547193416,0.0,0.04684628365444874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582602825454298,0.0,0.19152762293086528,0.0,0.07082584215607814,0.053786855481057085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16039316890312422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16915906922299986,0.03899965365993672,0.03933771805465995,0.12275195570576608,0.051238384983473946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035949711853172785,0.040348777428909466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04632335136866406,0.05542851664573442,0.11647131336565762,0.050151711538546986,0.0,0.15242874073874954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033986756750216465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20186010819587424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0482969562563825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04388553331240736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980466851605562,0.08168473293929365,0.0,0.0,0.0375507958376512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03988883852640004,0.17056619282618954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03524568916961375,0.06798773318060203,0.0,0.04211771779004441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35485721382889857,0.05894322191225732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276311258215619,0.0,0.0,0.1313214773985393,0.0938751253252882,0.0,0.042555473806236185,0.0,0.0,0.09836030183096953,0.047871582646413065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05387733629134378,0.0,0.15074774797683732,0.0,0.0,0.03416403719540961
mentalhealth,xuannlyn,2020/03/29,Dangers of antipsychotics ⚠️⚠️ I want to abstain from Seroquel but doctors dont seem to be listening to me and I know antipsychotics are quite the most dangerous drugs out on the market .I know that there will be permanent side effects to deal with after taking it long term .But I hate the fact that doctors give out antipsychotics like candies to patients instead of focusing more on therapy  . I feel that doctors and pharmacists  are harming patients by giving those medication because of the dangerous side effects and may cause potential health problems in the long run .,7.556560332871013,9.190055834951457,6.989348127600558,71.1601941747573,63.466019417475735,10.545908460471567,40.92787794729542,10.608840637214634,4.95367517337032,473,27,72,12,7,147,70,103,0.215,0.722,0.063,-0.9685,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,3,2,7,4,0,5,0,7,6,0,3,1,21,17,5,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,2,6,1,0,0,5,6,0,1,6,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,0,2,6,1,17,13,3,12,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,3,5,49,11,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883959293138833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341526506755296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840724240161478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5482462180422732,0.0,0.0,0.20925382963324052,0.0,0.20705593067628197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027789760354148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.342553952908056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17627657649155629,0.0,0.18978536620953235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962477185911007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722824315840694,0.0,0.0,0.3160140463589047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17986566408331786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084379436025404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899049656282856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16254098806826026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342438888396727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041821770539241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531067799528024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bejustdonow,2020/03/29,"Schools can they be our second home? As much as we want to have it as our second home... it isnt. 

But saying that I can be misleading because there might be a chance for it to be a second home or even a first for some but it isnt at all easy to the point it isnt something that we can see happening well atleast in the right way. 

As many schools are trying we have seen the goals being achieved but only due to gaining issues with them that we didn't have. With money issues and most of all stress.

we cant put the pressure on teachers and the school to raise us when they didnt choose to have us...

Parents are there for that reason and they should take responsibility for us.

But what if you dont have parents?

What if your parents are abusive?
What if they are neglecting you?
What if they are poor and stressed and dont have time for you, What if they work all the time to make ends meet? 
What if they are drugged up somewhere ? 

What if you just dont have A parent to do the role of a parent? 

P.S.D lessons are there for that reason in my opinion and that's good and so much can benefit from these lessons but as we can see it is not enough because it only deal with easy stuff rather than the so common serious stuff. These lessons can help just a bit but not the whole school focusing on all of these students that need help. It is impossible to do so.

The time.
The money.
The rules.
The everything... 

Some schools want to help but the abusive parents wont let them.

Some schools want to help but the kids dont want to end up in care.

schools are there for academic purposes.
To get the grades and work.

Teachers studied for that reason only, not to babysit and take the role of parents even though so many want to. Its not easy.

Kids waiting to get a diagnosis for a mental health issues but it never arrives so no one has the ""right"" to take care of them in school..

It is difficult and schools are stressed to care for these kids. We should not be arguing with schools to care more, to do talk tackle mental health issues ecc we should argue with....

Stupid parents that keep getting pregnant and then choose drugs over their kids 

The governments care for these kids... The lack of health and social care. 

If schools are going to have to care for these kids with 

Mental health.
Physical health.
Food banks.
academic. 
life lessons.
and 
so 
much 
more

They should have training to not do a mistake and cause more harm than good.

They should get paid more as they are doing more work then supposed to.

The schools should have more benefits to get food ecc 

Might as well if these kids dont have a home to go to let the school be a boarding school.",2.6493366540164445,4.711341426944973,2.6861824003795083,95.35907752213792,76.85578747628084,5.757890575585072,23.123379190385837,6.6274283507984215,0.3921018659076534,2080,64,452,18,48,625,181,527,0.10800000000000001,0.75,0.142,0.9533,9,0,3,0,0,0,59.0,13,5,14,11,19,25,3,4,33,0,66,10,0,5,5,96,97,50,0,24,28,8,0,0,0,9,8,1,4,7,36,28,2,3,9,0,5,3,20,12,2,5,4,4,34,13,71,75,21,29,0,1,3,0,60,13,0,17,12,327,70,24,0.0,0.09771615783825564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05027433229474107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045019181130098576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943009267442151,0.04236087133175457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042512646188965525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416422250761371,0.0,0.09564165375901768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304595503409554,0.042607952249042,0.0,0.054472158668723125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03706038067822135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035075436748785604,0.0997258001814112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772089714216652,0.0,0.046870893463662,0.06917382993367069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03646497943414735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21916042472503405,0.0,0.0,0.11055885264044386,0.0,0.16545282890073262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17215925261260887,0.0,0.036652572919427535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843334870681182,0.029126302796550645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02752544140186066,0.08361394054286611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246689806292069,0.08749004893559974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909399153329227,0.03057607280716353,0.031803850693339034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02794267337754101,0.0940858202272026,0.0,0.0,0.3663027980454017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03898147780905213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04145370680672676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12719284896188018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043087073676467,0.0,0.032792630942515125,0.0,0.5842644046122207,0.06571972406100576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0420350483013109,0.0,0.03174559259023524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170756554897007,0.0,0.09441102155557712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301332852721876,0.03314404462307434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0405142948679749,0.0,0.07213536863695283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027996629958115547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14880598526932248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121610708868067,0.032731325869736684,0.0,0.0,0.07415247817581601,0.0,0.0,0.04603867391585527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006119575174862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crispy-crunch,2020/03/29,"I’m worried about my husband’s mental health. He is in the military and I’m not sure how to help him because we are geographically separated. Hi, all! This post may be a little long, so my apologies in advance. My husband is 21 and I am 22. He went into the military around the time that I received a scholarship to my state university, so we’ve been geographically separated (I’m in California and he’s in Georgia) for the past four years on and off. It has been difficult but we have persevered very well. 

Aside from how well our relationship has gone, his mental health has progressively declined. He constantly tells me that our relationship is the only thing keeping him going and it’s really worrying me. He really doesn’t like being in the military because he is constantly made fun of. He is very quiet and admittedly, he is one of those people that other people like to pick on because he reacts how they want him to. I try giving him advice over the phone. I have Aspergers and I am no stranger to being bullied because of my social awkwardness. In fact, it’s something that I think brought the two of us together originally! But I can only offer so much help over the phone and sometimes I think I can be unknowingly insensitive. My advice just becomes repetitive words that eventually seem to go in one ear and out the other with him. 

I’m really worried that he might hurt himself. I can’t be there to make sure he’s okay and that scares me. I am graduating this May (virtually!) and he was supposed to PCS (move) to California last week. The Coronavirus made it to where he can’t move and we don’t know when the next time we will be able to see each other is and I’m worried that if he does something, I won’t know until it’s too late. I’ve considered telling his chain of command but I don’t want to risk his personal goals and career or make him feel even worse. I’ve asked him how he feels about being separated from the military and he told me that he would be ashamed to be discharged for mental health problems because people and veterans would “make fun of him”. He doesn’t tell me a lot of things because he doesn’t want to worry me, but I can tell when he’s hiding his feelings. If anyone has any guidance, I would really appreciate it. He feels like he is a burden to me but all I want to do is help him.",4.183728036669212,5.515727225108222,5.6981563534504724,78.41177234530178,71.12121212121212,8.985077667430607,28.7397504456328,9.402419484367199,2.5171044563279863,1846,70,362,41,34,626,199,462,0.132,0.767,0.10099999999999999,-0.9439,0,0,2,0,0,0,41.0,7,0,1,3,19,18,0,4,17,1,50,4,1,12,5,77,84,34,0,10,10,2,4,3,0,8,3,2,0,1,23,25,0,1,10,0,1,9,10,8,2,4,9,7,51,10,46,58,5,44,0,1,1,0,67,17,0,9,19,238,74,4,0.07415391113448126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492468747099854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050427202417410735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051850138829541995,0.0,0.0,0.06601270245181133,0.0693238968685484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712212157351632,0.08189716887112175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026806855363546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648925873481734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04897795894213273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997778218129645,0.052975568931125455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113518853779098,0.0842867531505568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23646641982822014,0.0,0.0,0.14911141060824495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938329555713165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591140338273392,0.0,0.0,0.0815061005343955,0.060445334765280065,0.08364884167671614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868356596472883,0.07432169988819426,0.0,0.06562387786651705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06304300347757948,0.0,0.1403324473640163,0.14849493449046894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22418910371256512,0.07866558126827826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576277442624403,0.05451165694221387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07886352574930093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10049721860605744,0.11279478184196902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078829886780295,0.1542269553974734,0.06474833495294034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07101894883253054,0.0,0.0,0.07095527825124949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19001957716865292,0.0,0.0,0.1592270984637882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07424100130000587,0.0,0.059091066434942226,0.06750693567070269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559057397937452,0.0,0.11417460724727772,0.07334011422259999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13977836733751525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25925514718989545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852912712809997,0.09502966410255456,0.0,0.0,0.08647948382494561,0.0,0.0,0.07085723988504533,0.0,0.05034563806974639,0.0,0.07243759619367736,0.0,0.08919802476452053,0.0,0.0,0.12236948542353596,0.17495159219482312,0.0,0.059481794617113525,0.0,0.1333465432732278,0.06874141853790916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3765344813678516,0.07556917059189877,0.15803043267086034,0.0,0.0,0.0477526875391289
mentalhealth,ouranos0797,2020/03/29,"Why can I never focus?? Recently, Ive been having a chaotic mind that just has racing thoughts, and whenever I do homework or schoolwork, i write down what it says but cant even understand what I wrote. Especially in math and history!!! I would like to take adderall to calm down and help me focus, but unfortunately, i know I have to have ADD/ADHD to take it. Any tips on how to focus/slow my mind down to not be as stressed. Thank you!",3.1370443349753714,4.729753804597703,4.5835796387520515,84.33724137931036,74.17241379310343,7.730049261083742,26.221674876847292,8.418075326091056,1.6954709359605915,339,12,70,6,7,113,63,87,0.057999999999999996,0.753,0.18899999999999997,0.9166,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,11,0,0,1,1,18,18,8,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,5,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,11,3,12,13,0,7,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,3,50,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909062495673665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16460749866145846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987679118650666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224613664489404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330285509749392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825713822059924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4888184358109677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18668977769538386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390027217338773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924939542615546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772762137639729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639944481961952,0.0,0.0,0.2228541574380497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19216673150465227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25199054437918483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21841937435865816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17195080556598538,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PopeRat69,2020/03/29,"I don't know what to title this I don't know if I even suffer from anything. I don't want to die, but I don't love living. 

Last year I had a series of mental breakdowns and if somebody asked me, I really couldn't tell you what they were about. I remember last year I felt like I was under stress constantly. Between school and my social anxiety I just felt like my mind was about to snap.

That year my friends started basically ignoring me, and I began to feel like they hated me. That they talked about me behind my back and ridiculed me. It didn't help that   I was/am extremely socially awkward. I just felt like they all hated me and that I was alone.

With the people I did speak with, I acted totally different between each of them. I felt like I had to put on a different mask to talk to any person and none of them were really me. I wasn't feeling great to say the least.

During the summer I began sporadically crying for hours on end. I broke my phone not long after that, and during that following period I didn't get better really. My 'friends' at that point were regularly talking or getting together every day without me. I had nobody I connected with and I didn't know what to do.

When school started again I actually felt like I was getting better. I didn't feel under nearly as much pressure and everything started getting better. I had different friends then before, and talked very little with those I had had before. Then in late December, I got suspended for reasons I'd rather not disclose and shortly after a family member died. At that point I think I somewhat near snapped inside. For awhile I just felt like I was drifting through life unconnected to anything. 

The weird thing is I don't cry as often anymore. Of course I cried when my grandma died, but I don't frequently have complete breakdowns. I haven't felt strong emotion or paranoia like I did those months before summer since then. I don't know if this means I'm better or worse or anything. 

My new-ish friends are great but I still feel disconnected from them. I think some paranoia is still left over from what happened, but I feel like I'm happier with who I talk to now, but they aren't happy with me.

I'm pretty much an asshole to everyone I know. I treat people unfairly and harshly and I'm not sure why. A couple of months ago I tried to be better because of the suspension but I slipped back into old habits pretty soon. Right now I fell like I'm stuck in a hole and every time I try to climb out I fall right back into treating my friends like shit. 

I take responsibility for being a shitty person, but I'm struggling to stop. I know I'm responsible for how I treat others but I can't stop. Right now I'm attempting once more to be better and to get better, but I know it's only a matter of time.

So I don't know what I have and I don't know if this even belongs on this subreddit. I just needed to write and get all this out there.",2.9991652470187415,4.847801388415674,4.306487563884158,85.09743492333901,75.14991482112437,7.149151618398638,24.8575468483816,7.9765259561132025,1.4190353253833048,2313,77,459,36,50,762,243,587,0.221,0.652,0.127,-0.996,3,1,0,0,0,1,51.0,0,1,8,10,26,44,4,4,13,0,43,3,1,2,4,97,97,43,3,8,26,0,12,11,5,0,1,2,0,2,25,28,0,3,26,0,0,7,23,12,0,0,32,14,89,32,67,61,11,76,0,2,0,1,32,24,1,11,56,311,114,2,0.0,0.0,0.05201990796565383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04725340788519005,0.0,0.0,0.05520993893284795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036250563997972635,0.0,0.0407796821197156,0.0,0.05286618501490711,0.0,0.0,0.13160126980364112,0.0,0.04983481612207198,0.0,0.0,0.1229692963310958,0.0,0.03249543092909729,0.0,0.13608090225478567,0.0,0.0,0.3300197485855919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589133832408101,0.057605891239458334,0.0,0.0,0.058983142571863725,0.1756655929991376,0.034378582283144214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597263995217948,0.16708329703752706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05996316041295691,0.047214148415625885,0.0,0.0,0.07041749492368618,0.0,0.08982683381060473,0.05093708923034924,0.04790886265678633,0.0,0.050253062159975034,0.0,0.13476801534205166,0.07616501252521314,0.35828132060201645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059241436284342,0.0,0.16710413348180034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04263444938773098,0.11754223363537727,0.0,0.0,0.04713917287200806,0.05674625520637357,0.0,0.10525918301458748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03573053480367753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05249662240010215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26366502351957216,0.0869045821003597,0.060132578116431974,0.0,0.057918173165780115,0.0,0.03765228567120285,0.2864739936732503,0.0534275829131637,0.04707102649566612,0.0471749863239283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048111616922117184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058066912075770076,0.0,0.0,0.05372088252757869,0.0,0.053824838281511855,0.0,0.08509822135721035,0.0,0.07837350532604531,0.03952643890577005,0.0,0.05148419872412235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05593669229961123,0.0567701776986391,0.0,0.040542348789786464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391267475796974,0.09309117093369984,0.0,0.0,0.10078462402896576,0.0,0.0,0.10846469468385148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05358822304772602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244941984886403,0.054808438016765514,0.0,0.0,0.06038639948045697,0.13657156987495922,0.0,0.0423918379473872,0.0,0.107898988482965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054718833265545504,0.04409607209319353,0.0,0.0,0.10867947489931368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319283204055658,0.0,0.08514202180404871,0.08913401890363946,0.06106294800602484,0.05572801373079825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050241183406907086,0.0,0.040080203352037234,0.2142305951366545,0.04659263678370481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035414778704721234,0.06831390113099156,0.0,0.0,0.062167439648118335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238385979690913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04398382866876319,0.0314418289404051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481012443112932,0.0,0.0,0.0513860117473922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05432435121305699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298381266822217
mentalhealth,end_my_miseryy,2020/03/29,"is there anywhere to go to talk to someone? the online hotlines and crisis hotlines are mostly useless. most of the people there are drones who act based on a script, and it's pretty annoying",4.718333333333334,6.88628527777778,4.823333333333338,81.855,71.22222222222223,5.911111111111111,28.66666666666667,6.42735559955562,1.5597333333333334,154,6,25,1,3,48,29,36,0.22399999999999998,0.701,0.075,-0.7506,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,2,3,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,19,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31757395914873904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3873955119657144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5684916161517319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4734620342836794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4491352605135439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonomouse27,2020/03/29,"I’m struggling My (19f) family is not having a good time with COVID-19. My mum and two younger sisters have conditions that mean they’d probably die if they got it, my stepdad has had to move out because he’s not allowed the time off work (he’s a postman and delivers medical supplies). My sisters are upset, they’re young and don’t understand why their dad can’t be here, my mum keeps crying and drinking alcohol to cope. I’m just here. I should still be at uni but uni closed and I thought I’d come back for a couple of weeks and then go back to uni so I could concentrate on my essays in my quiet uni room. I was dumb and didn’t anticipate the lockdown and now I’m stuck here, I can’t leave for a couple of months because I can’t just leave my mum and sisters without my stepdad being here. Also if I leave then I’m not allowed back to my mums for 3 months. 

Thing is, being at my mums house has always hurt my mental health, me and her rarely get on because she drinks way too much and her views on food have given me an ED. I’m not motivated to do any of my university work, I haven’t been sleeping well at all so I’m always tired, if I do get motivated then I can’t concentrate because of my mum and sisters making noise (the only good WiFi is in the living room). Idk what to do, I need to do my uni work but every time I think about it I feel sick. I’m having more panic attacks than usual and I’m laying awake at night overthinking.

I’m scared someone I love will die, I’m scared I’m going to fail university, I’m scared my mental health won’t survive this pandemic. Does anyone have any advice on how to get motivated or idk chill out?",3.3931888246628112,4.136862109826588,4.833656069364164,86.08532032755302,72.41040462427745,7.7319845857418095,26.266377649325623,7.937092434478242,1.367403082851637,1294,41,281,17,24,434,169,346,0.222,0.754,0.023,-0.9968,2,1,3,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,3,8,18,14,2,6,9,0,34,11,1,7,1,48,64,26,2,6,13,11,1,0,0,3,6,1,2,0,6,18,4,1,8,2,0,4,13,10,1,1,8,3,38,4,33,47,3,38,0,2,1,1,20,16,1,4,17,166,44,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215100030858484,0.0,0.10078035285418764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541342044173624,0.15693393872705616,0.0,0.0,0.1282574343024283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593827791055193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728234531371553,0.0,0.2175376698454046,0.0,0.2299429381430249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123297924049969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529261845608258,0.20868714025482915,0.10358651824260376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957415519186384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252447448531586,0.0,0.0,0.1847604732273309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945365509832558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889970399963032,0.0,0.04768201640881653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11403057214136594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780699289881988,0.0,0.10718820583471513,0.1581923913409986,0.07542206918039854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004776182426557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881205614959552,0.1009524356551827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382011180361561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2995571820126391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327055392370449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851114005690663,0.0,0.06294743839183298,0.0,0.0,0.10272272123986097,0.0,0.0949995267265396,0.19006883760028487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15054220308939634,0.10022829487264852,0.06932295391989242,0.06992387265270235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849620909361673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172105841805637,0.0,0.11064329140121372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016737013526606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832388043648759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437028536591646,0.0,0.07990193232744391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07530984392766568,0.0,0.0,0.09858511525892973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265017908838401,0.060425030123260635,0.0,0.07486539842197718,0.16496508109911015,0.10838648517497758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211952864183348,0.09817189664310792,0.0,0.0,0.10386052996443608,0.0,0.0,0.07485268223633221,0.07564352174592331,0.0,0.08478898636768802,0.0,0.08509305100005853,0.0,0.0,0.0909039377445763,0.0,0.20595933370553632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spicyramyunn,2020/03/29,"I want to die because of my mental illness I have a severe depression, bipolar 2, anxiety disorder, and ptsd. I am undiagonosed but I also do have some adhd symptoms. I do take medications but sometimes it is just so hard to do most basic and easy things I need to do, such as eating actual food, picking up calls and texts, etc. I am in college and I need extreme amount of energy to do homework and study for the test. I tried everything like schedulers and pomodoro methods but they never work. The only time I can actually study or do everyday work is when I am hypomanic, but like typical bipolar patients I go into really bad depression after hypomania. 

Today I woke up at 2pm today, knew that I had email to reply and homeworks to finish, but I just simply couldn’t do it at all. It just felt like my brain stopped working and telling me to go into panic mode. I’m literally in a verge of crying because I can’t do this anymore. I’m trying so hard but I can’t even control myself. We’re in online system for college because of coronavirus but the professor noticed there was something off with me so she sent me an email. Most people don’t know that I have mental illnesses because I am very good at hiding them. Most professors probably just think I am a terrible student who doesn’t try. I am registered with disability services in my college but there’s only so much they can do. It’s almost 5am in the morning and now I’m just panicking again about how terrible student I am. I also have memory problems so it makes me extra difficult to learn stuff. I’m not confident at all if I can succeed in my career when there’s so many bright and hardworking people, esp WITHOUT mental illness. How bless they are. 

I don’t know, I briefly thought that if it is worth living like this and I am not sure. It’s just really really really hard to live every day. I don’t know if it makes sense to anyone else, but I hope it doesn’t make sense to anyone because if you know what I am experiencing that would not be fun at all.",4.247274667121886,5.434665641089111,5.907459883919426,77.52173267326735,70.80693069306929,8.938750426766815,30.02014339364971,9.314750747691287,2.7412739160122914,1605,65,300,34,29,550,200,404,0.18100000000000002,0.7190000000000001,0.1,-0.9865,0,0,2,0,0,1,33.0,0,1,4,5,26,19,0,1,8,0,41,10,1,7,5,73,65,38,1,11,24,0,4,4,0,1,7,0,2,0,19,15,2,2,9,0,1,3,13,8,0,0,7,6,45,11,39,55,11,35,1,2,1,0,12,17,0,11,18,216,64,18,0.0,0.0,0.17554992196728592,0.0,0.10809840084438048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006858289708522,0.0,0.0,0.14386061610262035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880894540118611,0.0,0.08920291304823724,0.12578558603221748,0.09216097814924322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751017004193654,0.274153232242491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004102148850943,0.0918455920893492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088282266567923,0.0,0.0,0.09880217769607384,0.058008151813115486,0.0,0.15494184547593856,0.0,0.09335042785141323,0.0,0.10308666002328984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203788396892973,0.07513888911875663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031429740902408,0.059408917770225285,0.0,0.07578393677874043,0.0,0.08083825433229552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636289497302709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876385308278907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223751449007733,0.07544298729509707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417236084996412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933732433006114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19772931861618187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17577357033877447,0.0,0.1588490897309948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18012027334300168,0.09119179117474252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906117927305532,0.2719352197419341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612114132042465,0.13338861095513693,0.06937240589666505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10240486365530396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368169695939609,0.0,0.10553302035211268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12471537141820747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09697770789569313,0.08606680192558426,0.10514282712516768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304885233801438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161411862194553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924532993928317,0.08895954239859646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519943169399564,0.0,0.0,0.1029674012059806,0.0,0.0,0.08477365850445125,0.09348901521197273,0.06762869107273953,0.0,0.07861734162457462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05975656129771826,0.057634185073647724,0.0,0.07140759747182351,0.052448618259468914,0.0,0.17051782479849412,0.0,0.0,0.18320362486168024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421541091270176,0.05305286795817857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670536632264646,0.0,0.1964467097859265,0.0,0.0,0.06389552350019763,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xoelenore,2020/03/29,Kind of Hopeless This year has been unreal. I don't feel like any of its actually happening. My mental health is just in a horrible state. I cry over tiny things. I feel shameful of myself for no real reason. Facing your own mortality is dark and humorless. I hope everyone sticks together to get through this thing.,2.9015738498789356,5.8027806101694965,4.497142857142858,77.83254237288135,81.88135593220339,8.795157384987894,25.37772397094431,9.23628265651192,2.917646973365617,252,10,44,8,7,84,51,59,0.28800000000000003,0.669,0.043,-0.9383,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,1,1,0,5,2,1,1,0,7,10,1,1,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,7,3,8,9,1,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,30,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.25104409363763003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494244681733276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825829014467706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24581849331250324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26015205013607984,0.18378325994843525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440529268377396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274900397035349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734503871704013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555125899586628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678918398361862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568196031260834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592528666612393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928128871649073,0.0,0.26450132619799577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418180219455233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16566399878876553
mentalhealth,pilondilicious,2020/03/29,"What's happening to me and my body? Since yesterday I haven't felt normal for more than a few minutes at a time. I feel like how you feel after having a bad trip on lsd. I feel like my chest is closing up and it hurts. Well doesn't hurt to breathe but it hurts like its closing up. I feel like I'm observing it all through a 3rd person's view. I was afraid maybe it's a heart attack but ruled that out since I would've been dead alrady. Was feeling dizzy for a few days and then diaherea started and now this whole thing where I feel like I'm having a panic attack combined with a feeling of derealization. 

Tldr: feeling weird since the last 2 days... feelings of despair, anxiety seem to be taking over my body.",2.751347031963469,4.360490869863014,3.7837671232876735,89.60501141552513,75.23287671232877,6.510502283105023,24.495433789954337,7.1686216300943375,0.8882392694063928,561,18,119,6,12,181,93,146,0.22899999999999998,0.633,0.138,-0.9618,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,0,4,16,2,2,9,0,9,5,5,1,1,24,25,8,1,1,2,0,10,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,8,0,0,11,0,0,1,2,10,1,0,4,11,12,6,17,20,5,19,0,4,1,0,2,9,0,1,14,72,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690389522007587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584734128180784,0.0,0.0,0.0948514799353625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523685801053709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14652555180682494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5169573860300812,0.3246242208801724,0.10907407360887976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045634313685524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461686630627145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648343140680289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09259938165803937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774967675008898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412673961387612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130414447641994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332854396977874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919137354954004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341741881338304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28191395049774803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040685544039886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854132649263787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754709712734448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624123068713786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10214028511287604,0.0,0.0,0.12683064398292276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069837209272722,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unlikelypapayas,2020/03/29,"Could I have been experiencing depersonalization throughout my childhood? I was recently trying to figure out the word for how I often felt when I was a child: I would often suddenly feel as though I was no longer in my body, my head would get light and it would feel like I was piloting myself from above; similar to dreaming in real life. None of my friends have recognized this as I describe it. The closest thing I could find to this was depersonalization, but I'm not sure how I could be experiencing that as a small child through young teen. I couldn't control it, and sometimes I would be scared I wouldn't fit(?) back inside my body. Does anyone know if that's possible or whether it was just my imagination?",6.845073529411764,7.145495125,7.004705882352942,75.12117647058824,64.66176470588235,10.03529411764706,32.44117647058823,9.827888789773867,2.890341176470588,571,21,110,11,8,184,83,136,0.08199999999999999,0.904,0.013999999999999999,-0.8156,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,8,4,0,1,4,0,20,4,3,3,1,33,26,13,0,10,6,0,3,1,1,5,1,0,0,2,9,3,0,1,7,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,8,6,20,3,13,7,1,12,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,4,7,83,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159248365902862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748295137092433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3683125807239081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18594856694137096,0.39711157619932497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14508471441105922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765769855214385,0.11844103622957275,0.15918524217310462,0.0,0.151529858757618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808962092911236,0.0,0.08661889088631727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701492712960375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111433063490504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710300001153133,0.08099704847419706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186904304186576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18870631518297787,0.0,0.0,0.16369849067066145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598559113401753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639714174096634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625594027557574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11014409237416324,0.0,0.16288869567590672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256112322969827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4710923312764325,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Farsea01,2020/03/29,"Intense mood swings I'd rather have my first post on another r/ but, at least right now I really don't care.
I have been experiencing mood swings since I was a teen or something like that, never went to any professional because at that point I thought it was just some ""teenager thing"", right now I am pushing to my early 20's and realized that it has been slowly spiralling out of control, sometimes I feel like the pain is unbearable and that I can't hold it anymore, crying myself to sleep and dreaming about people that used to help me calm down in the past, and just like that every trace of pain is completely gone (except my trashed room ofc) right now I don't really feel anything, it always swings between wanting to die, to complete apathy to intense energy, I just move as if my life counted on it, I constantly pushed my social boundaries without feeling much or getting sick (going out in the rain with summer clothes, dancing in the middle of the street, and pretty much being unfazed by any kind of climate change) during these episodes of explosive happiness or energy, I am incapable of feeling emotional pain until I switch to another mood, switching is constantly triggered by two facts each.
Sadness is constantly triggered by:
- Anxiety, people laughing while looking at me, or hearing people say my name can take me really fast.
- Myself, I constantly push myself to feel this way too, I start overthinking too much or forcing myself to feel sad
Apathy is constantly triggered by:
- Loneliness, when I am alone even when I have a lot of people surrounding me, I detach myself from the real world and pretty much any social interaction that I may have.
- Crying, If I have a ""sadness episode"" that's strong enough to make me cry, after that I feel completely apathetic, the pain just goes completely and i just feel, neutral.
The ""happy me"" is triggered by:
- Ego boosts, doing something that makes me feel better or puts me in a position of power, makes me go nuts, I feel like I have so much energy (that never goes off until I feel sad again), I can spend +24 hours without sleep, hunger is not a problem and I do so many things that will damage my ""other versions"", by not thinking in the consequences of my actions (spending too much money instead of saving it for hard times)
- Sometimes it just appears randomly, I just feel like I have too much energy and I start singing and dancing everywhere, sometimes I feel intense anger too or the need to tell somebody about some achievement.
Obviously there's way more to this, I don't even know what to expect posting this, I know for a fact that I need help of a professional but due to last time's energy outburst, I barely have money to hold for the rest of the month (sad college student noises).
Should I go to a professional ASAP, or should I wait and try other things around.
Right now I don't feel anything tbh, but when I am sad I am constantly crying about how I can't hold it anymore, so I guess I should treat it.",11.808212375859435,7.910700969696973,10.751209574738992,65.5627807486631,58.01960784313725,13.6803666921314,43.64833206009676,11.20814326018867,4.817653526865292,2368,95,415,42,21,757,251,561,0.166,0.695,0.139,-0.9725,1,1,2,0,0,0,76.0,0,0,0,6,36,31,1,0,20,0,41,9,2,10,5,98,81,35,1,11,26,0,15,5,0,5,6,2,1,0,32,16,1,5,19,4,4,14,12,13,0,2,7,19,64,15,66,68,16,76,0,7,1,0,9,25,0,17,38,298,96,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05793430561248322,0.0,0.0,0.04654442119018226,0.0,0.0,0.11411810774711326,0.11731054116584524,0.04279197934953508,0.0,0.11094979557738556,0.0,0.0,0.09206347421211462,0.0497961703864881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03409893694585455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04947210940191568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570319359294734,0.0,0.05917438183691324,0.0,0.23459731621847496,0.3626909255094981,0.06273858201230534,0.0,0.0,0.2457785523675011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05805421893327086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292207758244305,0.0,0.0577983161910255,0.0,0.07389228733500937,0.0,0.047129695692246884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3959710209408159,0.11988512932376175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047580347722301256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02922499742307548,0.0,0.09537158831528393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06162138343668809,0.0,0.0,0.11909286461949105,0.05010894830075123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06304554681896041,0.0,0.07498735782089888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05508709889083308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05825022342904105,0.0614834951305288,0.04559646972849555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039510259696848855,0.13664100917904112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04697335135938647,0.0,0.0,0.04755600098537355,0.0,0.0,0.11201600275061734,0.056711772314554765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04464872139402181,0.059452633503833126,0.2878431210096369,0.08295378823458899,0.08628478588792568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23808546930156724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053398604524090905,0.1551198777188507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05287895008030332,0.0,0.10714518707412604,0.11381694838717316,0.0,0.05352456412762637,0.0,0.05623256520991644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366903938055114,0.1075048463024903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19108103166559934,0.0,0.044483687948033486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046272018523049414,0.0,0.11195565077986884,0.1140423270578005,0.0,0.08612672993422947,0.16597063996852987,0.0,0.07918559896200696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04205798439356508,0.0,0.04889177765622536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148702492715903,0.035842445239050315,0.0,0.044408069599065715,0.06523512826377814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03797784181563624,0.0,0.05464273917707189,0.0,0.0,0.048311977837090056,0.0,0.0,0.032993344351719335,0.08880105342368662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05185455621395623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078433690137214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TripleRaccoon,2020/03/29,"How Do You Live Your Daily Life With Mental Health Problems? I've been putting off this question for a long time but...**how do you guys & girls live your daily lives with mental health problems?** I personally have been abused mentally, physically, and emotionally all my childhood & been dealing with this ""Backlash"" of sorts since 2014 & it's just gotten worse. I would go see a counselor or admit myself in the mental hospital but I want to know from other's first before taking that step.",4.960796703296705,7.443615340659338,4.666030219780222,81.8695947802198,71.41758241758242,6.747802197802199,25.660714285714285,7.645422480735847,1.4994274725274732,400,13,68,5,8,122,69,91,0.07400000000000001,0.893,0.033,-0.5514,0,0,0,0,1,0,21.0,0,4,0,1,2,2,0,0,3,0,7,3,0,1,1,17,14,4,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,5,4,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,2,0,1,4,1,9,0,9,9,1,9,0,0,1,0,10,2,0,3,4,40,14,0,0.0,0.15662630401218253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4296910282490908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248594302067873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362844956998185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869858739449565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244273498081786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512795193107842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089119764686055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810285469245789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264945171277203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09337135756226864,0.0,0.0,0.3501847683933279,0.11698605908048522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5328751380296153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154252504488538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25298042857074754,0.0,0.13288981123243415,0.14808567194558858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10534017820690428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935086784529904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939218646728053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708241521914727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797046580499037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13471528569996016,0.09390564397180916,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CarlWithHats11,2020/03/29,"I don’t want to be happy. I don’t want to discover a hidden hope; I don’t want to wait for a sense that life will reveal for me; I don’t want to find happiness in the things people are supposed to. I already know how I want to be happy, I think I always have: I just want to disappear. I want others to lift all of these responsibilities they have made me accountable for, to forget about me and the hopes they placed there, and be allowed to rest,  endlessly. 
I need all of that to go away. Otherwise, I will keep trying. I know I must. I know I’m the mishap in my mother’s life that my family has tried to open space for, that my mother has tried to get over of; and I know that they expect me to be grateful by being the best person I can be. 

But I can’t; and even if I could, I’ve never wanted to. I only want peace, one that can exist only in the absence from other’s lives. There must be no burden in others, so that I don’t feel the need to make up for it. However, existing for myself might be easier in my death.

That’s why, I don’t want to be happy. I want to be allowed to be at peace, in a place where I can’t harm anyone any longer.",2.094618473895584,2.7933250682730955,4.258815261044177,89.16766064257031,75.42570281124496,7.3004016064257025,19.8574297188755,7.594959193182576,0.3556441767068268,878,15,207,11,18,305,116,249,0.066,0.732,0.203,0.9801,3,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,3,1,8,9,0,0,9,0,32,2,0,5,5,47,60,8,1,20,3,2,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,14,5,0,2,8,0,1,2,10,2,0,1,1,1,36,7,41,42,4,18,0,0,0,0,6,15,0,4,1,152,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110065273426518,0.0,0.08299144623746177,0.0,0.0,0.06782643735194573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974033903172443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370876057590473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467069431054928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963405936740693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587715170706684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402574184852976,0.0,0.05043140487499695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116030726474288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052109892880969545,0.0,0.056684387672786316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4246991935273479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19812811574037711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865325574306114,0.0,0.0,0.21925739111749132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408982434247495,0.0,0.0,0.08807200985558818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437614514873777,0.06657704498410172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058080929313079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791149358877054,0.07692542936423012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758622306078095,0.1517131198535269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06914697112390511,0.08708888603370399,0.20841358090697412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626264543865124,0.06390919235887403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20315019093558054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6471198531073541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999959377219692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,An0ther0neB1tes,2020/03/29,"I am afraid I am a 20-year-old student in New Zealand. My location is irrelevant but I thought I'd share it anyway.

I am currently in my third year studying for my Bachelor in Applied Computing. At a couple of previous jobs, I broke down in tears due to the stress - those two jobs were at McDonald's and a small business. I am afraid that even if I attain a Bachelor in Applied Computing, I am going to encounter great difficulty in the workplace purely due to pressure. I am afraid that even with my dedication to study that I will be disadvantaged in life because of my inability to manage my stress.

Furthermore, I feel discouraged when I do worse in an assignment or test than I should have, and sometimes it makes me feel like I will not survive in the real world.

My anxiety is a real nasty bitch, and when I am under pressure, for example, an on-the-spot question, I can't think and my mind goes blurry. This is one huge problem that will screw me over in the workplace.

I am afraid that I may not do well in future employment, and I am relying on my growth in maturity to allow me to become better and manage my stress better.",7.670638820638821,6.4644501261261285,8.333161343161343,71.26396805896809,63.5045045045045,11.856511056511055,37.749385749385745,11.022393298168332,4.118994594594596,896,39,169,21,11,302,120,222,0.245,0.645,0.11,-0.9866,4,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,4,6,20,2,9,11,0,23,2,0,2,1,27,29,11,0,3,5,0,2,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,9,7,0,1,5,0,0,2,3,14,1,3,2,2,32,6,31,21,0,31,0,2,0,1,2,21,2,4,9,126,41,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132589940482071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025082165643478,0.16351125250847262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618790450675751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16381617134434526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19557324196491424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14971857605662536,0.10576802284714444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414108062274962,0.0,0.0,0.16322730398731966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938365426833019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10457315449927046,0.07233048566853999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882552744450196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494898126148997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429890635182997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553551467527291,0.0,0.10032352958228186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416652929383501,0.0,0.0,0.16585156578843746,0.0,0.0,0.337030044502265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14642672147217922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5087774871180318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486542463586448,0.0,0.11753635533729047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14462480505242062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311608086594698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087712926868793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906806268835982
mentalhealth,Lazy-Ball,2020/03/29,How do I open up to people w/o guilt tripping? I’ve had people threaten to kill themselves if I didn’t do what they wanted and it’s the worst! Or they’ve used their mental health problems against me to make me feel bad for being my own person or having my own problems. I don’t want to do that to anyone or make people uncomfortable but at the same time I feel like I’m never allowed to vent or say what I’m really feeling. How do I find that balance? How do I not come across as manipulative? I genuinely can’t tell if I’ve said things that were manipulative or guilt tripping or if the people in my life just don’t care what I’m going through,3.1710294117647067,4.24603875,4.637529411764707,86.03688235294119,73.26470588235293,6.910588235294116,24.62941176470588,7.1686216300943375,0.8959788235294122,514,15,110,5,10,172,78,136,0.147,0.773,0.08,-0.7263,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,2,0,4,9,1,2,3,0,13,2,0,9,1,34,28,15,1,7,12,0,3,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,8,3,0,0,4,0,0,4,6,7,0,0,4,5,14,2,14,23,4,11,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,9,3,73,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12524770748333086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14956110795105218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826289170016597,0.0,0.0,0.15429951682564996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271711520195668,0.12796626414177026,0.0,0.0,0.16371614558958872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180033112376044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904004993933336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19817423277772475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265206207941617,0.08751096773303077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391334017312461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18051492189218693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13815151759812844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.496728277087703,0.1564042199169215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3427950680721192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475145946844455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17038799990666342,0.142446641899644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565623235143936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900206606676493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444867977137393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15470567580779315,0.0,0.0,0.21130402287829075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WontgoOutside13,2020/03/29,I can't go outside I can't stand going out side of my house the backyard is fine but going out the front door gives me panic attacks and if i go down the street i start to feel sick and have almost passed out a few times. I have talked and i am still seeing mental health experts they say it wont get better if i dont go outside but so far all its done is get worse and worse any advice is welcome.,1.6083279220779223,2.759223306818185,2.990129870129873,96.01590909090912,77.29545454545455,5.0285714285714285,19.38961038961039,3.1291,-0.6385116883116888,313,6,74,0,7,102,61,88,0.248,0.6970000000000001,0.055,-0.9673,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,1,2,5,1,1,4,0,11,2,0,0,1,14,22,9,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,2,0,2,7,0,0,1,0,0,7,4,2,0,0,1,3,10,3,6,20,2,18,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,3,3,45,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17943013915507516,0.0,0.0,0.18386767676875573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486706171117762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20889286154313716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16239588246662112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18790575512570035,0.21519983359913986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284316839511816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19186645986925688,0.1761438579015402,0.5217738989349319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19517816854022035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21187141009095367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18504453486917466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154370664042137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14602101764051664,0.0,0.0,0.14632038831017288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12996631210539336,0.0,0.14663818873845882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14758581380883898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706958274361804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37424643190212653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alonelysaber-returns,2020/03/29,"Hey! New here, I did something weird last night Don't get confused because of the messed up time zones. Here we go. My country's been on lockdown for close to 2 weeks now and I've done nothing but stayed at home with my sister, mum and dad. I've also been watching a lot and I mean A LOT of movies at the moment (most of them horror) and the worst , you could say side effect it's giving me was probably just a bit of headache. Anyway, last night I watched some movies, did some work, talked with family a bit and at around 2 o clock, readied my bed and went to sleep. Here's the fun part, I woke up at 5:30. And no, I wasn't awake I just opened my eyes and completely WOKE UP after 3.5 hours of sleeping. And guess what, the air conditioning was on. Here's the thing, where I live right now, the weather is very very pleasant. We don't get the ac's fixed by at least mid-April and here I'm laying in bed with the window open and the AC turned on. Now, I distinctly remember feeling warm and going to turn on the AC but I'm also aware of the fact that we don't use ac's this time of the year. So I turn off the ac, go back to bed and wake up to my alarm. Yes the alarm rang after I woke up. So I turn off the alarm on my phone (ancient button phone that doesn't even run internet. Very basic.) and I'm using this phone to open Instagram. After struggling to find it for about 2-4 minutes, I realise oh crap this phone cannot run instagram. At this point i'm severely judging my sanity and saying again and again ""Why would I do this? Why would I do that?"". After that moment I couldn't go to sleep so I went to my parents' room and slept till about 10 o clock.

​

I'm sorry if the post is all over the place I just had a simple question. Is quarantine just affecting me or are you guys doing weird stuff in sleep too?",1.6600133458941748,3.1936240388601043,2.9117145548751786,95.02060684565866,78.04145077720206,6.0259381378552375,20.246192494897162,6.714681859716394,0.045655613126079686,1413,33,330,13,33,456,190,386,0.096,0.846,0.057999999999999996,-0.9223,1,2,1,0,0,0,53.0,3,2,1,2,27,13,1,5,23,1,25,8,8,4,3,59,52,27,0,5,8,4,2,0,0,2,0,3,6,1,14,28,0,0,6,0,0,8,8,10,0,0,15,8,33,3,51,33,11,69,0,0,3,0,21,33,1,10,26,201,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14699355886256618,0.0,0.09957954956141736,0.11167521818125023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181536260476402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066964140233467,0.0,0.05602472778547395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20067396246275365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636114757193813,0.0,0.0,0.07337904764239933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405121529918302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060702702989883166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664030749560253,0.0,0.04647017231561771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399994403165066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960336404480218,0.08816411126973836,0.208928009781906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124424812089243,0.09100087490544252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218869030578622,0.0,0.09050838519543952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14983046589246374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115422293542067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15626950564481967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001120111158483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876288562123484,0.0,0.17249413492080862,0.0,0.08818578710024545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020501596482554,0.09952467909526716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602166588128988,0.0,0.08688038540717083,0.0,0.08802004515394958,0.0,0.09908965219329872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295517154917046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411099333377788,0.07848677805580523,0.0,0.14617385358023738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382703294046763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3678874135547071,0.0,0.0,0.07075332886887616,0.0,0.1028806608392173,0.0,0.09795901363973204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607956288086862,0.10520978680711417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387014378753194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610579173682595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718164935264836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3998670851906145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875365331175662,0.0,0.2274949392276457,0.0,0.0,0.07372103268357727,0.0,0.0,0.17039460209193624,0.16586080206554382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06690828428371852,0.0,0.0,0.13057403268704207,0.0,0.11167521818125023,0.059184116105803014
mentalhealth,JaXonFernandez,2020/03/29,another cookie-cutter suicide post i'm a very toxic person who's done more harm than good to other people and i've fucked my life up because of it. i have no friends anymore and i've pushed everything away. i don't open up because i'm scared of looking weak so i lash out instead. i don't even know why i'm posting this. bye,-0.11411111111110728,2.1505658428571444,2.10904761904762,93.79484126984129,90.57142857142857,4.253968253968254,22.063492063492063,5.82211442006289,0.2618730158730158,259,10,55,2,9,87,53,70,0.276,0.64,0.084,-0.9374,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,1,1,0,4,3,0,0,0,5,10,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,1,5,2,8,9,1,8,0,0,1,1,4,5,1,0,1,29,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404964021653329,0.0,0.0,0.22745634273068302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21548449981127976,0.0,0.0,0.2796226689141956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347075378686617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148535737051647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20612750250895626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17719739972333548,0.21203296232703736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923702420518571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260462974980037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199866118214826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19259858299706786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15900434916146944,0.20026201318598613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43931315540058496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22962215772943856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508747311898097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18924007483174388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20695522305528036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cameronphoenixrose,2020/03/29,"Help me with a friend crisis TLDR; dump friend?

Screw it. No throwaway. I used to have a friend that we’ll just call Pesci. Pesci doesn’t like me anymore because, long story short they think I’m a complete monster and have me blocked on everything so I have no ways of speaking to them. And everyone that I am friends with knows about our past and how we aren’t friends, I’m dead to them and I really just want to sit down with them and explain that I am not who I used to be. One of my other friends, (we’ll just call him Marshall) always gets mad at me whenever I express sadness towards Pesci and I not being friends anymore. Saying that I should just move on and try my best to forget. But I will never be able to forgive myself until I get to speak to Pesci. So I was just wondering if Marshall is right and I should just try to forget about Pesci (which I’ve tried. Easier said than done) or if Marshall is in the wrong and if I should tell him to stop denying my suffering like a prick.
I was just wondering what to do. Because I’ve known Marshall for a long time but the only time we speak is when he’s angry at me for being sad about Pesci. And I’m scared if we stop being friends he’ll try to turn our mutual friends against me. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you!",2.482272727272729,4.0948408636363665,3.3930303030303044,92.10954545454544,75.96969696969697,6.315151515151516,24.5,6.980632752743323,0.7606045454545454,1004,33,220,10,22,320,132,264,0.156,0.68,0.165,0.685,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,7,1,4,1,14,23,4,1,7,0,27,2,1,3,1,53,44,22,1,9,16,0,0,2,9,8,0,5,0,0,9,16,0,3,7,0,0,1,7,9,0,1,4,5,39,14,33,26,1,22,0,3,0,1,39,9,2,7,12,148,48,0,0.09768422757639277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08128110266387456,0.0,0.0,0.06642862448684288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19375301044163776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909479691669728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025135702035091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994930362137735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024200540936442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09996488005006393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334146561484992,0.08779228503030675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6792353271838579,0.0,0.10207195428170993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095135729862345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368469681273496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544715874580266,0.0,0.0,0.17289493492346453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382287466241122,0.0,0.0,0.0753400983485241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619336069344389,0.07429325689172599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325064842241028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257901753303947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342179661268784,0.09292006988818084,0.07768241852655235,0.09779895295525162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333677652806078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538032050838401,0.08993451246246402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259210871471882,0.0,0.0,0.1139209173110874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26528471345306937,0.1062523888710338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16873561771994494,0.0,0.0,0.057616688335622314,0.07753719302361163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21186875575286165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06939207257286059,0.1068023681278366,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,its-cris,2020/03/29,"I’m kind of struggling. I need advice I know most wont read this but I had to put it out there somewhere. 
Im not suicidal or anything but I am super isolated. I’m just not happy. And I feel like I can’t tell anyone because I don’t have a reason to not be happy. There’s a ton of people who have it so much worse than me and I know that they have a tough time with things for a reason. I just wish that things would be back to how they used to be. I’ve been unhappy for less than a year but it’s already affecting my friendships and relationships with my family. I’ve started isolating myself because I don’t know what to do or who to talk to. Things are kind of getting better because of the quarantine thing but I still can’t sleep some nights and I constantly think about how I’m not good enough and how I’m not enough. I think that if I isolate myself everyone else would be better off and they may not even notice. I just don’t feel good and I don’t know what to do. Pls help me I don’t know what to do.",0.764095238095237,2.542419236363638,2.7093506493506503,94.29712121212124,81.63636363636364,6.008658008658007,19.567099567099568,7.07126945348624,0.17061904761904767,792,20,186,10,21,265,106,220,0.139,0.715,0.146,0.5732,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,3,13,12,0,1,6,0,25,1,1,7,0,49,43,18,1,5,16,0,2,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,16,10,0,0,11,1,0,1,14,2,0,0,2,2,26,10,22,33,7,10,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,6,8,134,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11418591676376393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894851714650027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08170527382043828,0.0,0.09615881408741817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898515775874019,0.0,0.21369473831502767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20669128169248366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262749408337816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761441996126824,0.0,0.0,0.24147763654338736,0.0,0.07717930244485878,0.0,0.0,0.11165659953198713,0.0,0.0,0.11015717862239373,0.0,0.11816724156120367,0.08347872277720843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06105007698136576,0.0,0.0,0.19601895985757672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487811529184449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832308590693683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621965341581176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433656758318016,0.3210925955324861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05708773217961233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589928508217883,0.08664389399772662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965720102477257,0.0,0.0,0.13303618784044474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101010531311878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174680149745518,0.0,0.0,0.11688310463438095,0.0,0.0,0.24028557214712154,0.0,0.12545476225615554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169358717070954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827080810729007,0.0,0.09331774523792516,0.0,0.0,0.12215854117053475,0.0,0.1278165565990172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392079575061614,0.10213334654776056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31052373216418216,0.14974742405394784,0.0,0.0,0.06813703941079452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009221634266957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343734386115802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190816440413577,0.16601588172898415,0.0,0.0,0.07524852390218413
mentalhealth,SalemWishes,2020/03/29,"Really odd symptoms? Don't know who to ask for help So for the past couple weeks I've started experiencing what I think is some kind of dissociation?? Idk I've desperately tried to research what is going on. Basically I'll look and my mind will go blank I'll try to think but it feels like every thought i have gets sucked out of my head. I just have to sit and my eyes feel heaving and I just stare it's really intense. I noticed it happening alot a couple nights ago and now I have 0 memory of that night I can't remember barely anything before my boyfriend got home. When I checked my phone the next morning I saw I saved memes and photos that were really strange. I woke up this morning and it feels like my mind is extremely noisy it's been happening alot. My mind is filled with thoughts, self harming ones, good ones just all these kind of voices and they give me this huge headache and normally it passes after a while. It's happening quite more frequently today. It's 1pm and it's happened twice. Just the loud thoughts and headache. This is bringing up alot of anxiety and thoughts about previous trauma for me. I'm terrified I feel like my brain is trying to kill me and I'm scared to talk to anyone because I feel crazy. 

Any ideas? Help? 
P.s I hope everyone's okay at the moment I know these are tough times for everyone",2.507677848467317,4.80450552255639,3.4827067669172926,88.3154308849046,78.36090225563909,7.099826489300174,24.51648351648352,8.139509932561175,1.463404164256796,1063,38,218,20,26,340,152,266,0.16,0.721,0.11900000000000001,-0.9195,0,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,1,1,8,15,2,1,9,1,15,4,3,0,1,45,47,16,1,2,5,0,5,3,0,1,1,2,1,1,19,14,0,0,15,0,1,5,2,6,0,3,9,12,27,9,24,37,6,27,0,0,4,0,9,6,1,5,18,121,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627924046117061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661893240723151,0.0,0.07445896829463967,0.0,0.0,0.06805703028645828,0.0,0.08009621676367604,0.0,0.09099259240690798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059332886758833386,0.0,0.08282264647338802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865507330473223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153927502320236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200668841749087,0.1860104304339416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460707602385626,0.2086027143171572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05085212672125075,0.09337004278166024,0.1106324156772821,0.08163774297522812,0.07784555813606278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3442826423225552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989105398302156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304796221945684,0.0,0.09763226593983712,0.0966729683333484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098763565656091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107683805421702,0.2027132937240852,0.10698260945523227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142654984296542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173464590156956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29483372984383244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351404030106556,0.1826796019966183,0.09536502067766016,0.0,0.1108135061752558,0.0,0.0,0.13190981557180306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09291472518156572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352491696350087,0.0,0.0,0.18706075446926496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102585594253315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744664504336327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153885065745336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889232622711325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116556181727747,0.0,0.07823204234007496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247332576910024,0.0,0.3090840009333581,0.056755266067660674,0.0,0.09225967086339863,0.0,0.0,0.1982467950279582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807412649478424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,finnkat,2020/03/29,"I feel like I'm not worth fixing I feel very broken mentally and physically. One of the hardest things for me is brushing my teeth and I used to think it was because of depression or whatever but now I think it's just me. When I was working I pretty consistently was able to brush my teeth once a day which was a huge accomplishment but now during quarantine, I have no schedule and basically stopped until my mouth developed so many canker sores and my gums hurt so bad that I've been trying to brush again but it all just hurts. And I was looking at my gums and all the sores and swelling and what looks like blisters almost? and I think there's been some receding in places and I feel so hopeless and broken. And I looked up my dentist who I can't even go to right now cause I'm coughing and my chest hurts, and it honestly doesn't even matter. Even if I went I couldn't afford any treatment and even if I could afford treatment it wouldn't matter cause my shitty habits aren't gonna change. They haven't for the past 10 years, back when I was in middle school and only brushed my teeth once a month, and I thought I would be dead before I had to face the consequences but I'm still here. And that's how it seems everything in my life is going. I feel like my ED is starting to relapse and I want to self-harm again and I want to cry and I wish I had never been born. I feel so hopeless and directionless, nothing makes me happy or gives me passion anymore and i feel like seeing a therapist wouldn't help because I don't want to have to work to fix it, I want to either be dead or have it magically go away. Rant over, thanks for listening.",4.422942442173209,4.957792284023668,4.994717590102205,86.61724045185585,69.94674556213019,8.157288864981174,27.197955890263586,8.150884317080207,1.4833857988165686,1304,40,281,17,22,418,167,338,0.21100000000000002,0.682,0.107,-0.9926,2,1,0,0,0,4,20.0,0,0,1,3,22,15,0,0,8,0,29,12,6,5,3,70,63,40,2,12,13,0,6,4,0,4,5,1,0,0,14,23,0,1,11,0,1,4,11,7,0,1,13,15,44,8,25,42,4,34,0,6,4,1,5,11,0,8,23,182,58,4,0.09844690342032797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858035314972248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694727021398791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763287472088997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249410643728916,0.07569959196554144,0.08219905222607085,0.12002463714782062,0.0,0.08377106385364487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022641765205982,0.10414377022515277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860184168369283,0.0,0.10813930069677816,0.06349010839699465,0.0,0.0847921736602678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26009300493707044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847772890121343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2986662742067724,0.2109914624223112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944392403398173,0.16784893177065602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479855930366977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659868841909847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161683387162432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953595930659888,0.19238473706401268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24801181316062385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571407248580227,0.0998097082157244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921132368889078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857937907186131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592832097684134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446245895947264,0.0,0.0,0.20968547836659635,0.06671016958350039,0.0748733062385285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093978708814017,0.0,0.0,0.10285606071895337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015589307912023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407311761621851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996335220907048,0.07844943606244804,0.08962236346675542,0.10270159073924698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968122494433926,0.0,0.07861982424052331,0.0823060194199239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063668191082838,0.0,0.11430444266541903,0.06540374819123243,0.189242401800035,0.0,0.07815584468991793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683898519794214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08502651591452665,0.0,0.08122900551555885,0.2322661372345002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126126576796408,0.0,0.0,0.11320908043054292,0.0,0.0,0.1433410363739192,0.0,0.0,0.06993385561015321,0.0,0.0,0.06339657809417591
mentalhealth,mmc87,2020/03/29,"How is this outbreak making you feel? Hello fellow redditors.    

We are living in what it seems a new world. It's crazy how things changed overnight and what we call a normal life is now just like a distant memory.    

I've got depression before this whole thing happened. I am a good citizen and I've stayed at home, like everyone should. I was unaware what the isolation was gonna do to my mental health.     

For me it's been only a week but I'm breaking down already. All those negative feelings I had before and that somehow I had been able to keep under control are reaching surface now.    

I know I have people out here, who care about me, but right now I feel like I'm on my own and it's just not enough. I really hope this ends soon for the sake of my sanity.",2.2371428571428567,4.1888685584415635,3.5649350649350686,89.09597402597406,77.70129870129871,6.7376623376623375,23.33766233766233,7.7094869923839395,1.0834857142857142,594,19,123,9,14,194,104,154,0.10400000000000001,0.7959999999999999,0.1,-0.1492,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,2,1,0,1,11,7,0,0,7,0,14,2,0,4,1,27,28,8,0,3,5,0,3,3,1,2,2,0,1,1,15,7,0,2,5,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,7,3,16,6,12,19,4,18,0,1,0,0,8,9,0,3,10,86,31,0,0.16477560447383616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18183397694184733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804238062210179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16825431518480605,0.0,0.16799971047944365,0.0,0.17431074106786446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18480985157144475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192098668525666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14594227757328346,0.17025724671698486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745015137814994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499464897247728,0.1177157247598311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13820595930705076,0.13178610343566133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14571052285642275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175148762301048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652833662688429,0.16365935461523853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464601282380465,0.0,0.0,0.09055636296448348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163858824334236,0.2415031116259343,0.0,0.14549987757941468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099889954898236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16605505367384502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591413055826127,0.0,0.0,0.16144510721091412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531927227546186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142346569586904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555947154643153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071746590204914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000552177407708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17562887027731408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21893917977392865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321730507976667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18396607791895994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jungkookslesbian,2020/03/29,"How do I get myself to do basic stuff? So I've been feeling awful for a good month, and I was SO relieved when I got to stay home from school because of closures (of course I don't wish harm on anyone, but school had been particularly stressful) so I was lazing around, watching Mad Men on netflix, (a show set in the sixties) and one moment in one episode just hit me in the face. 

Basically, a character's psychiatrist is stumped about what's wrong with said character, because she seems to be exhausted by her own household and basic duties. Suddenly I realized, that's what had been happening to me. I've been finding it harder and harder to shower because I just don't have the energy (even though intellectually, I know it'll make me feel better) I haven't done laundry in months I've been wearing the same dirty clothes for a week, and I haven't texted or talked to anyone outside of my household. I go to sleep at 3-4 am ish after hours of bingeing youtube and netflix, and then sleep well into the afternoon. And I can barely pull together 1 real meal a day. Has anyone found a system/structure to get themselves to ease back into being a real, functional, person, that has worked for them?",5.055112660944207,6.141092866952793,5.839589592274681,79.13303245708157,68.8283261802575,8.22843347639485,30.442328326180267,8.472884824447931,2.312081759656652,950,37,176,14,16,311,143,233,0.09699999999999999,0.83,0.07400000000000001,-0.8015,1,0,0,0,1,0,29.0,0,0,1,2,13,9,1,1,12,1,25,6,4,2,0,30,39,17,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,2,2,7,12,1,1,7,3,0,2,4,5,1,2,13,4,20,4,31,22,2,26,0,0,1,0,7,10,0,2,12,120,27,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2932454650802157,0.0,0.0,0.12444791900058187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074943571603239,0.0,0.25565470457514033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363804316381953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015673943501433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430596608121306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233382123226667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14136993484253849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277708476512401,0.0,0.0,0.15327890197074165,0.0,0.0,0.14607509307928576,0.0,0.07944918659071439,0.11725410196960137,0.11180748853304433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12362098270374153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022660657713895,0.0,0.13767072382344553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682812716811759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331479595641333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22316738096110625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18945853231808174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220643185988058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182364986776444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297783855875409,0.0,0.0,0.2829616681060704,0.0,0.12726486494713388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797935594599679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14900374461097127,0.0,0.0,0.16013564047439555,0.0,0.16003276902763286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123625854357188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13734868421283453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213577513999624,0.0,0.1256932317563292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16075829485490645,0.0,0.0,0.10177302254629693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15284478459483572,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BasedPalutena,2020/03/29,"Should I go to therapy. Hello everyone, over the last few months I have been trying to better myself. Not only for my marriage but also myself, in the amount of time I've been working on myself I've been failing at every turn losing my job my apartment and my car the only thing I have left is my wife and dog. My question is as the title states should I seek therapy? I've been trying everything from writing my inner thoughts down to meditation. I feel hopeless and I feel like I'm not at my full potential and lazy. Any help would be appreciated. Thank you in advance.",2.5880450522928413,4.890456380530979,4.288930008045053,82.60995172968623,78.11504424778761,6.586967015285603,24.432019308125504,7.686295010490155,1.4469362831858406,453,16,84,7,11,152,72,113,0.12,0.7490000000000001,0.131,0.09,1,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,1,0,5,1,6,0,0,4,0,12,0,0,0,0,15,19,7,0,3,3,1,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,5,2,18,3,14,10,3,18,0,3,0,0,7,11,0,1,4,59,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15477089464577615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161130827698653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116711370741342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16306266458163673,0.18493221109064104,0.17393793080501455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19571551840189172,0.13826235839995465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999112900157776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297232901317452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920548965645107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15775790062373646,0.0,0.0,0.21027773647294665,0.0,0.0,0.0945520514002542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165175946888106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15447881370195266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943861268003507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168049284931272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17818220587695907,0.4426512102223342,0.0,0.12857690594631846,0.0,0.0,0.15364618954969547,0.11285256230464505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26279686259617835,0.210511899273808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14089671816827054,0.0,0.0,0.13748262177511522,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snotwhite,2020/03/29,"Maybe some help here? Hi, okay... so I'm 21 and have been struggling w depression and anxiety for a while and not so long ago I tried to take my life away. I date this amazing guy for almost 3 years now. He knows about my mental health issues and always helped me in every way he can. But I'm starting to wonder if I'm actually making him worst. I honestly believe I'm a monster sometimes. And I'm starting to believe that I'm ruining my boyfriend. I love him very much and never did anything to hurt him. But I'm starting to think that maybe I'm just a big unsolvable problem. Anyway, here's my question: should people w mental health issues even sat someone who doesn't? Any answer helps, thank u.",2.4322258592471364,4.4902819007092205,3.7038297872340458,87.82615384615387,77.51063829787235,6.040589198036008,25.03055100927441,7.010146845296331,1.0737251500272782,552,20,109,6,13,180,93,141,0.155,0.73,0.114,-0.6179,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,9,11,0,1,3,1,6,4,0,1,1,22,25,12,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,12,5,10,21,3,14,0,3,0,1,13,3,0,5,10,58,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.1312659945297537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923830363300447,0.0,0.13469606796036845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111926197229905,0.0,0.0,0.09147394760098657,0.0,0.10290263361453844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069333669691148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12638007522339378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031018165054224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158564766805458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884504860672307,0.0,0.11333361723162877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318973877614354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2859636050890825,0.0,0.0,0.270485149023029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439997277278969,0.0,0.0,0.2807947681949813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392522698096228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501102401434663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119040416235003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140389113886935,0.0,0.08978895784697358,0.0,0.27027423897094843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27111639938519666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988830673076046,0.0,0.10374527941566904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325488202386882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871147106362688,0.0,0.0,0.15068616008951086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397304508218747,0.0,0.1330375163372577,0.0,0.28562852670276306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062295439605282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113758289294987,0.0,0.0,0.12384216810241368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619096537125301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913259914878832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098791288218933,0.0,0.10677073605783044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14587439986704873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662243052080162
mentalhealth,Apple_Juiyce,2020/03/29,"How can I confront my problems without spiraling? My coping mechanism is just completely ignoring my problems, pretending that everything is okay, and it does work I forgot about everything completely. But sometimes when I get reminded of my problems I start to spiral into this phase of self hate. I know I shouldn’t be Ignoring my problems but I don’t know how to confront my problems without going into days of feelings of depression, self worthlessness and causing self harm. How can I ease my way into stopping my ignorance and being my healing process?",8.604523809523812,9.687038091836737,8.359591836734698,64.21993197278914,60.938775510204074,11.839455782312925,44.904761904761905,11.538034831475384,6.026341496598637,455,28,63,13,6,146,57,98,0.318,0.63,0.052000000000000005,-0.9798,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,6,15,3,0,0,1,8,1,0,4,0,29,16,9,0,6,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,3,6,0,5,3,1,0,1,4,14,0,0,1,1,17,1,12,12,0,9,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,50,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406025561720388,0.0,0.0,0.2870098827953144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826942749645215,0.0,0.11788539686169247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977531721563835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24601874759647116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920527124184833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150860223208041,0.0,0.0777860230901112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513017708117311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15043966415051144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6548275625895903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4283538418698328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536731704827498,0.0,0.0968768519755666,0.0,0.0,0.11442893069706045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864054348983904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638743971994552,0.0,0.09964253910513796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,44chino,2020/03/29,"I think my mom is suffering from a severe personality disorder but she won’t accept the help and believes there is nothing wrong with her. My mom’s behavior can be destructive to me and to those around her. She’s very manipulative, won’t accept that she has literally any flaws, she always blames others for her own mistakes and she sometimes snaps and lashes out at people (sometimes violently. She has stabbed my dad and assaulted others in the past.). I really don’t know who she has never landed herself in jail or in an institution. She’s been living with me for a couple weeks while she looks for a new place and I forgot how unbelievably toxic and unstable her behavior can be and Im honestly really uncomfortable and on the verge of kicking her out. I have no idea what’s wrong with her except that there is something wrong with her. How can I get this woman help?",4.7637954859511735,6.577285287425156,5.954131736526951,75.2548364808844,70.37724550898204,9.210317825886687,27.217411331183786,9.661875296680813,2.6394038691847075,701,24,126,17,13,234,99,167,0.209,0.652,0.139,-0.9329999999999999,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,11,3,0,7,0,16,0,0,3,1,30,21,14,0,1,3,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,8,16,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,2,1,27,3,20,15,1,16,0,1,1,0,25,11,0,1,5,97,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667008922170964,0.0,0.0,0.10352369142211047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355196860217138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17151451175072102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16844296963372665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17447225931330335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953548323136228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040772032992238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17185257881250401,0.16443781276124894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836633007210905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442456846000672,0.0,0.12783741758059014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3565870066392949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741150977300248,0.14702762423582533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607171317122628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532366772256974,0.1055392260139016,0.13292402367039385,0.15905113168509735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19504877454966305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17198001031457866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719643607303196,0.3011247497252148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754478883309034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560820590053912,0.0,0.0,0.1221121667667479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4993288128406172,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maggot-brainn,2020/03/29,"Bipolar_schizophrenia I have been diagnosed a few weeks ago. My whole life now makes sense (F22). It felt scary at the beginning knowing that I feel differently, think differently and act differently but soon stopped feeling that way after realising that at least I’m different. Kinda gives a meaning to life that sometimes feel meaningless.",9.12,11.485073857142858,7.57,65.72500000000001,60.42857142857143,12.028571428571427,39.0,11.698219412168324,5.424014285714287,280,14,41,9,4,84,45,56,0.145,0.8240000000000001,0.031,-0.7615,4,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,2,3,0,1,0,12,13,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,4,11,3,11,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,7,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15679553578479566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795318676080148,0.0,0.7392176565223648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26831110116187,0.0,0.16983480025086506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16968167320374533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720991677446383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2498744776115396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807034588906888,0.0,0.0,0.19267674010751135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494117257640174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14788156956430326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11333907128358113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14040098069367926,0.1418843562976066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974828332144979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cespinozan26,2020/03/29,Mood change is this normal Been feeling down for a year now and suddenly I’m just so happy I feel so energetic and it’s weird man idk if this is normal or not just confused,-0.1629729729729732,2.131170000000001,2.2851891891891896,91.85913513513515,92.24324324324324,5.122162162162162,18.210810810810813,6.742157984588678,0.15903675675675674,138,4,30,2,5,47,30,37,0.075,0.6509999999999999,0.275,0.8518,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,12,6,6,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,1,2,5,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,3,3,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38551958643752055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3685344412699878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3879434857663805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7141298417184834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346815610341499
mentalhealth,usernameistakenok,2020/03/29,"Long read but need advice about my sister My little sister is having some trouble and we are desperate for help. It is a little complicated about therapy and counseling and I do not know all of the details because I no longer live at home. Anyway my sister has had issues for a few years with anxiety and panic attacks. Since I have left home a few other issues have come up. She is constantly asking my mom if she can or should do things like, should I wake up now, should I eat this, should I wear this. Sounds like no big deal and small right, she is 13 so I thought all of these questions were kind of a weird things to ask at the age especially because it was a day with no plans. She is also having major stress about small mistakes. On a homework problem she accidentally wrote 9 instead of an 8 and started freaking out. The incident went on for a while where she kept saying she didn't mean to put that. She is very repetitive and needs control. My mom thinks she is having trouble with her being in control as a parent figure and gets upset easy at things or tries to take control of things she shouldn't at 13. Which is another reason of why it's confusing she is constantly asking what she should do but wants control. She also apparently is having some paranoia or fear with people or things. She was always scared easily about things but it's different now. One example was a random man walked past them and she kept getting nervous about how weird and strange he seemed and talked about it for awhile. Another is she saw a waitress with a tie dye shirt and kept exclaiming how weird it was and it made her uncomfortable and scared etc. She also doesn't seem to have good confidence about herself or her looks and thinks she is fat but literally she's a twig. There are a lot of other issues and I'm sure these sound small but it's hard to explain them. I'm worried for my sister we do carry a lot of mental health issues in our family mainly depression and anxiety, and one grandfather having extremely bad paranoia and hallucinations. I want to help her and if anyone has any ideas that could help or what things to watch for I would be really appreciative until we can find and afford proper help.",4.882204801200301,6.255593067441863,5.379212303075772,81.20201425356342,69.48837209302326,8.3390847711928,26.4291072768192,8.748949900417786,1.8906676669167304,1769,54,333,30,31,567,214,430,0.20800000000000002,0.7,0.091,-0.995,4,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,4,0,2,5,19,24,1,8,18,0,48,6,4,8,3,92,78,43,0,16,14,7,1,2,0,7,2,3,3,1,26,31,2,7,13,1,0,4,7,19,0,2,15,7,45,5,46,53,11,37,0,1,3,0,52,20,0,17,15,246,71,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398030716824161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18162932546162425,0.0629945467399773,0.0,0.0,0.051483566941922035,0.15877143123916745,0.11583176992215055,0.0,0.0,0.05293631146305703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21232834545712653,0.08612799463337614,0.0,0.0,0.06321244158748768,0.0923009470218642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521514401665912,0.0,0.16362541327862368,0.3396487429352941,0.060446126707571775,0.0,0.0,0.04882495186672453,0.07805091235507923,0.0652065952030016,0.0,0.0,0.07909802551292401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746747852225395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443366301893626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137011412827503,0.0851917716807968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919510982358766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910788958449759,0.0,0.0,0.06349969975309909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781887936525909,0.0,0.0,0.08047333033978711,0.0,0.0,0.2029800563145651,0.0,0.1518812095350449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854643379104411,0.0,0.3160750492231274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07883751325258405,0.04160675768113571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225621387576308,0.0,0.0,0.07397353512383913,0.15175722736941627,0.06685094178810969,0.06699858701586135,0.06357507306088082,0.0,0.0,0.12872729535506292,0.0,0.07163608728663687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824674549927224,0.0,0.0,0.0762951619716153,0.0,0.0,0.1773349730360637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227202222259564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10260246520825332,0.0,0.0,0.08882621628150136,0.08406400844404141,0.0,0.07227119389448862,0.052485916342863856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244167121334585,0.0,0.07610675709019449,0.08480951367737674,0.0,0.07572779751393392,0.0,0.04850004140850564,0.07783972375646743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06465362911699872,0.0,0.06020549161324715,0.151592449195417,0.0,0.0,0.1378421833865874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626258692033789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05358602371015662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672246786326149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135324375409839,0.0,0.056922475259581086,0.060850668068737276,0.0,0.0,0.0865779069889744,0.0,0.3520760094093676,0.09702037469369977,0.0,0.06010314758368049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05140029395925105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06246645949444931,0.08930826594148099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018143488676296,0.06831407179288873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688444826655944,0.0,0.05378030090403535,0.0,0.0,0.048753025504516254
mentalhealth,GunGunBoi,2020/03/29,"What Do I Do? I have OCD,ADHD,And Anxiety. I see a therapist and it kinda helps. I have been seeing one for many years, but never really changed. I dont want to take meds because it feels wrong. I feel unwanted everywhere I go. What should I do?",-0.4247899159663859,1.812941647058828,2.5220168067226894,89.95764705882355,93.31372549019608,6.835854341736696,19.050420168067227,7.957251820313856,1.1372890756302525,188,6,41,5,7,66,37,51,0.218,0.746,0.036000000000000004,-0.8066,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,0,1,9,15,2,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,4,8,0,2,13,0,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,27,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29298170986271577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864945486706316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860882699352304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25789177788193746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857137308966388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465296332881563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13854840392384113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16340367593867364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471593168365422,0.0,0.0,0.270789728850535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880217092772271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651947514431291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15617465465761693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.388529520224606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18329567682312886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830527056496879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437904709606634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665401857767135,0.0,0.15698928703072246
mentalhealth,whoopsdroppedmyhat,2020/03/29,"Can’t find help TW: self harm

Hi, I’m in the Denver area and new to this thread. I read the rules and it said I could post for suggestions. Sorry for the phone formatting. I am having trouble finding the right kind of help because I’m not sure what’s wrong with me. I’d love a diagnosis, but I miss having a therapist just to have someone to talk to. I don’t have many friends and I have trouble telling the people close to me what’s wrong. I have a laundry list of symptoms, the worst of which is severe anxiety and obsessions and the horrible compulsions to bang my head or bite my skin when I can’t handle my feelings. Can anybody suggest someone in my area who works with low income individuals on diagnosis/anxiety-based disorders? Thanks for reading.",3.362044398554467,5.413394073825502,4.481342281879197,83.3478471863707,74.70469798657717,7.806091894682499,28.911202891068665,8.617729084823388,2.295261848218896,603,26,117,12,13,197,95,149,0.205,0.675,0.12,-0.9122,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,2,14,0,1,10,0,13,4,2,0,1,17,20,8,0,1,4,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,6,8,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,9,0,0,1,3,14,5,17,18,1,11,0,2,0,1,13,8,0,1,2,71,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373929250180488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860208377553213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12914524155672188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18538098939438324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178631123873098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956754935165013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496864378108205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600348662108064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21683695740142306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16843907537686525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14598685251110444,0.0,0.0,0.16399041805021566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15622040177859176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213797663525008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15491302161125592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32359012016796257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13813471606258576,0.15386251545399232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16874186991258938,0.18273291464015484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741026826499741,0.0,0.0,0.18106732401796347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244867458685965,0.16812152157792806,0.0,0.13000955817472715,0.14137775509098086,0.14891885391665244,0.0,0.1878057122177404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775686403122293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35369928232657194,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SmokeMeSober,2020/03/29,"This might be weird or helpful. (Drink Water) Let me start off with 

i was diagnosed with ADHD and Anxiety when i was in 4th grade. I have spent YEARS taking different types of medications with different types of side effects. It resulted with me avoiding drinking water as i got older because not only was it always associated with my medications but when i drank water i always got this taste in the back of my mouth that made me gag. the only thing i could compare it to was the taste of a pill going down and it was nauseating. I knew every soda machine in high-school down to what price they where each set at and which ones had which drinks. As iv gotten older iv realized that not only is that not healthy but water really is essential to life and specialty now with a pandemic. It may just be me who struggles with this but on the off chance its not, here is my solution.

I started buying crystal light to mix into my water and i always have it ice cold.  it dose not have a whole bunch of sugar and it dose not have a bunch of artificial flavors either. i have been personally using the pink lemonade and raspberry lemonade as well. This has helped me a lot keep hydrated. I really hope this helps in any way if you struggle with this and good luck to every one and their families during this hard time.",4.1544117647058805,5.8591938039215705,5.30093137254902,79.7666911764706,71.74509803921569,8.394117647058824,26.083333333333336,8.982922981607832,2.0918980392156863,1040,34,194,21,20,344,143,255,0.069,0.831,0.1,0.9061,2,1,3,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,2,1,8,8,0,3,10,0,22,23,1,4,0,46,36,19,0,3,13,0,1,0,0,2,9,0,0,1,24,19,13,2,3,3,3,1,6,4,1,2,14,8,24,4,33,16,6,26,0,0,1,0,8,13,0,7,10,149,48,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14385384093185608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987951941304846,0.0,0.0,0.08139880447344121,0.0,0.09156870970441898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204044116252756,0.0,0.07296684345726967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556918335897258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149103971161755,0.0,0.2501180510754019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3517756701538955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20170160337992632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11284070452477002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802718186320178,0.10039707719077803,0.1914669912301959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722597576209293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24069331580981956,0.12646760187031533,0.0,0.11888720964480705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063931604238447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12239940479028,0.08454629945894909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176303398735037,0.0,0.11326122505974195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24116646159782545,0.0,0.12698075565332873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16222104450146455,0.27310736921652706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451575348537626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15336332045595313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114085544845794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16944584556127426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502688616717901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999806557742666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952209095055772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979691770884792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10338071622431008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501077077997457,0.0,0.0,0.10762295628915504,0.0,0.0,0.1336386406050745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708164422654623
mentalhealth,verz4che,2020/03/29,"im going crazy ive been dying to get this off my chest for months now. last year i had an incident that led to me admitting myself to a psych ward, never would’ve thought id see myself there but it happened. stayed for 3 days and got help. left with a prescription that worked and after that i was in outpatient therapy and seeing a psychiatrist every few weeks or so. everything was going fine until i was forcibly admitted to ANOTHER psych ward a few months later for seemingly no reason at all. this experience was terrible, i got no help and the facility was dirty and the entire situation just sucked big time. life started to suck for a while and i eventually ended up in yet another psych ward not too long after the last one (about 2 months or so). thats when everything fell apart. my psych hospital bills we’re starting to stack up and insurance didn’t cover my medicine or therapy. i suddenly stopped seeing my therapist, physiatrist and stopped getting refills on my medicine.i was diagnosed with a cocktail of illness but the one that has me struck is “depressive psychosis”. at first i was just really sad when i stopped taking my medicine. it was hard for me to sleep or eat. i turned to drugs (weed mostly but also acid every now and then). It became my biggest focus to always try to be doing SOMETHING so that my mind doesnt wander into a bad place. since the covid-19 thing has been going on. ive been forced to stay home...and do nothing. 2 days felt like a week. im having terrible hallucinations (visual, auditory and tactical). im so paranoid and i feel so lonely. my only friend is my boyfriend , i told him i dont feel well lately but i dont want him to worry so i spared the details. everytime someone speaks to me with bit of a aggression i completely break down.  ive been having hysterical crying fits, the kind where you cry until you cant breathe and you vomit. i genuinely dont feel like a human being anymore. my emotions dont feel real nothing feels real and the fact that i don’t know why i feel like this all of a sudden is racking my brain. its been bad for about a month but since ive been quarantined from covid-19, it gets worse everyday. terrible nightmares and intrusive thoughts so horrible i cant even comprehend how my brain even comes up with those types of things. i cant think straight, i find myself doing the same thing over and over because it feels safe. im scared to tell anyone whats going on but honestly i dont even know. i feel so anxious and nervous and like if i say something no one will like me. ive been seeing signs alot of various things, trying to connect life to a higher meaning. i feel like i can see into the souls of people near me and i can read their thoughts and they all hate me. i dont know what to do. im scared for myself because i didnt grow yp with much and i was always praised for my mind. if i loose my mind i will literally have nothing. and that is my biggest fear",3.325291495437768,5.164307290102389,4.498655011492655,84.11008044856169,74.22184300341297,7.787086438671031,26.805600055721946,8.542538833126315,1.9361625409208056,2336,87,460,44,49,766,278,586,0.225,0.713,0.062,-0.9985,0,3,3,0,0,0,55.0,0,3,2,3,26,29,4,4,25,0,54,12,5,3,5,88,100,49,1,3,15,0,11,6,1,2,6,2,0,1,24,29,2,4,23,2,1,8,18,16,1,4,26,19,71,13,60,70,11,74,2,3,5,0,18,26,2,9,43,306,95,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0453278598240622,0.0943264412963974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887016308049808,0.0,0.06403351591036707,0.05621242627883975,0.03963274707157339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465271153098312,0.06910455199239121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188108724787982,0.0,0.0,0.1265497192635092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488257537522661,0.059429061020426936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452306634708332,0.07310924825074278,0.0,0.04881935336357096,0.05753012925163537,0.05882603902025161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3985790031008192,0.0,0.06573208765936885,0.05799892167945414,0.0,0.0637586149484614,0.050202635888766944,0.0,0.0,0.11231200741141384,0.0,0.0955125525327086,0.0,0.10188264613526672,0.05544499771668306,0.0,0.06378200230215406,0.2579370314889192,0.12147897991106744,0.05442275034530837,0.0,0.05180550382966978,0.04821291963167122,0.0,0.0,0.04379168173183872,0.0,0.0888406150508722,0.0,0.1288527145542328,0.0,0.09066611643987428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050122914660213284,0.0,0.05077513748642358,0.05596085724466377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598430085276202,0.0,0.0568557706049081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30612660391324603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059024649359485974,0.09345136021398953,0.09240533269484738,0.06393875618929874,0.0,0.061584187290390766,0.0,0.08007108256158413,0.16614915130227467,0.0,0.0,0.05016099497611446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061742340843749084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169527665085707,0.0,0.1809692714976013,0.0,0.041667134569217584,0.0,0.043715963066624224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631611491177717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11522575261094077,0.04310853510375784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039295541939830425,0.0,0.05921969159491454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669644450485755,0.12903101493062208,0.0363113677734345,0.05827761697968253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04507509033931775,0.11349534999459035,0.0,0.2258375139461793,0.05160034992017337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377439287613024,0.06371193775617523,0.056722040209379564,0.0,0.04802571700097121,0.08727176885492552,0.0,0.0,0.08023835683217534,0.12082903422772882,0.0,0.1421638273636931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04261713750542055,0.0,0.04954178478364269,0.0,0.1296395685624928,0.0658111325211132,0.1506256323628586,0.036318963909188734,0.0,0.13499539997522306,0.03305120860507218,0.0,0.0,0.054161225600302,0.0,0.07696550037541568,0.0616527667131417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03343198475331703,0.0,0.09093232823053406,0.0,0.05096312123474343,0.0,0.051145881795832085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04126452008576058,0.057562414298785176,0.05776288920505021,0.04026463129472551,0.0,0.0,0.03650077376741495
mentalhealth,random_sa,2020/03/29,"Safe to go to in person therapy during coronavirus? Starting off by saying I’m not sure if this is the right place to be asking this question, but I’d love to get some feedback to put me at ease. I’ve been working from home for the past few weeks, and I’ve only left the house to go to my weekly therapy appointments. At this point in time, my therapist is offering a video chat option but she will also be in her office which I would rather do. 
I’m currently in therapy for reasons other than the coronavirus, and covid is not causing me too much worry- I am not an at risk population or leaving my house to see anyone. However, I obviously wouldn’t want to be catching it or have a hand in spreading it to others in my home. There is extremely limited social contact when I do go- the only human I see there is my therapist and it’s not like we have physical contact. There’s probably a good 5 feet between us, but I’m sitting on a couch that other people have sat on and talking to someone who’s probably seen many other patients that day. 
At the moment, I’m not really sure what to do. I’d much rather go to this appointment in person because it is easier for me to communicate that way and I think communicating online would be a disservice to my mental health. Additionally, the state has not mandated the office to close down, which makes me think that it may be safe. At the same time, I don’t want to contract the virus or contribute to its spread, even though therapy is only place I go to out of the house. Sorry this is rambling on, but I’m just looking for some advice in this weird time.",5.182080745341615,5.5339330155279525,6.52005590062112,76.9928788819876,68.22360248447204,9.918260869565216,30.385714285714286,9.888512548439397,2.8440318012422363,1269,46,247,28,20,432,164,322,0.052000000000000005,0.85,0.098,0.9504,2,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,2,0,0,2,11,9,0,1,17,0,28,4,2,3,3,48,52,16,0,8,17,0,1,1,0,5,1,1,3,3,24,9,0,3,4,2,0,7,8,2,0,0,3,6,22,7,47,39,6,46,0,0,4,1,18,25,0,9,12,174,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904786165524442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404479526220017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474161043525355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655985936068705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05644246633111955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511621317542787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059713378698126235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061155322036259424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04837484921299076,0.0,0.2631073060028453,0.07766073439098088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841964540581716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18575215817624974,0.0,0.0,0.3205119077928805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09804024306515433,0.10060012886126414,0.0,0.0,0.04523516713899098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775291666048083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08356677356233347,0.0,0.061805049561493186,0.09387249533688233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330970590778746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612972067578044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21125832996752286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883883548265917,0.06419077293623672,0.16169335598639525,0.19347526914599056,0.0,0.08752819374609024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19965699357249614,0.0,0.0,0.09307928495287147,0.1037228387084707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0593160101295393,0.09519871960376174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790720009352985,0.0,0.07363188662678079,0.0,0.0,0.14756569180698215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438461696772872,0.07845184829947686,0.0,0.0,0.10364777242249172,0.06553621466879728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17453138621656256,0.0,0.0,0.07442094354421433,0.0,0.0,0.42354240192889336,0.21501001160935215,0.0,0.11865683741651285,0.09096994906301026,0.0,0.1619712457523779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137528078533199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922485534842137,0.07349423350049207,0.1485414412389893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740717415740692,0.09403040862937266,0.0,0.13154763503496655,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Noelgallagherslyrics,2020/03/29,"Regret Hi,

I’ve been trying my best for at least a year to overcome/stop these regret attacks, it’s the only way can describe them, that keep happening nearly every night. I can’t stop thinking about things I’ve done but mostly thing I never did or never said and it feels horrible. Was just wondering if anyone had experienced the same and if they had any tips to help manage it? 

Don’t know is it helps but I’m in Scotland.

Thanks for any advice.",1.7006666666666668,4.169797733333333,3.1288888888888917,88.66000000000004,82.77777777777777,5.377777777777778,19.0,6.742157984588678,0.2797999999999998,356,9,69,4,10,116,70,90,0.125,0.736,0.139,0.5106,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,1,2,5,1,0,3,0,10,0,0,0,2,20,19,7,0,4,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,7,3,5,2,8,12,4,9,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,5,5,48,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19694944776961396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741178150386018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092638580020606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22928886929290215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115111978689095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062526110663846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16981208497456518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190824590954786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822739352585587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27018548266152675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914428141233607,0.0,0.0,0.11076498952820704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31089102481989866,0.0,0.0,0.1891382562568708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15328561601704596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19171740140447435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370047223105487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18555744788645556,0.0,0.0,0.2677978129983498,0.1291432135775719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368372192271195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599786695874491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21856918177428386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978969428143025
mentalhealth,girlfieri223,2020/03/29,"I’m a healthcare professional and I’m struggling I’m a pharmacist in the US. I’ve struggled with anxiety and depression my whole life, but for the most part I do well with cognitive therapy and can function normally. This coronavirus stuff has completely thrown me off balance. I’m crying all the time, I have panic attacks, I can’t sleep anymore. I’m terrified of getting sick to where I can’t take care of my patients- I’m terrified of someone I love getting sick and being unable to seek treatment or dying. I’m in a constant state of stress and there’s *nothing* that I can do to change the state of the world right now. 

I have to go to work still. My husband still has to go to work. We are daily exposing ourselves to people who could carry this illness. If I don’t go to work, there is no cover. I am the ONLY pharmacist for a prison with 4000 inmates. There is no second pharmacist, nobody to hold the fort if I take a week off to sort out my mental health. So I’m pushing through. I’m constantly washing my hands to the point that they’re bleeding. I’m sanitizing everything. I’m trying to stay six feet from everyone (which is difficult when the pharmacy is only 10x15 feet). 

I feel selfish for being so scared. For complaining when there are thousands of pharmacists who are in worse places than I am. Pharmacies aren’t protecting their employees at all. They’re the only healthcare professionals facing this pandemic without the protection of a face mask or even gloves. I’m privileged to only have close contact with only 5-6 people daily. But I’m still scared. 

Please, somebody tell me it’s going to be ok.",3.4237931034482765,5.735042420382168,4.604096200307492,81.33863057324841,75.43312101910828,8.025301998682188,28.98045244893477,8.841846274778883,2.629608082582912,1296,57,235,29,29,425,167,314,0.24100000000000002,0.6940000000000001,0.065,-0.9963,2,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,2,0,1,3,16,16,1,6,17,1,26,14,6,0,2,27,50,15,1,4,7,1,2,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,10,12,0,3,1,0,0,5,7,11,1,3,0,2,22,5,41,46,5,31,0,1,0,1,10,13,0,6,10,152,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204695714271716,0.0,0.1063644783567354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201384627416365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093498565408738,0.0,0.11345766296208383,0.0,0.11245095600948644,0.2318011246785474,0.0,0.08563144240569874,0.0,0.11781052582295733,0.0,0.0,0.0923753945163553,0.0,0.1113099250180804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07083847749401577,0.0,0.0,0.10248322105082583,0.0963905601230097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05422948392053565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206876370364227,0.0,0.24381356002008145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400312522130625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757547707145312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679849293791658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10808409279576628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508351033676087,0.1029105227131967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4078472637250536,0.0,0.12583630147922648,0.0,0.11614271511705535,0.0,0.1487091056857171,0.0,0.1120547896953336,0.11772972933899027,0.10138715284825132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159203111285824,0.0,0.0,0.21475453911573944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732876371983842,0.0,0.09087368531607773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431562420228067,0.2569530995911228,0.0,0.1228560110731247,0.2242447079796631,0.1227770881327652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612792722141465,0.0,0.09374237057896603,0.0,0.12265121786543877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253910024982304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281659804442425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901011814840244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603053006488934,0.0,0.096431806353199,0.0,0.0,0.11974225533732065,0.0,0.10338643374405124,0.0,0.2342406889781496,0.0,0.10929824569742587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spacetime14,2020/03/29,"Is it possible to get withdrawal from texting someone? For about a year I texted my ex girlfriend non stop all day long almost every day. We broke up. We’re still friends but we aren’t texting nearly as much. My anxiety is shot up. Maybe it’s just that and everything else happening right now in my life and corona, but I can’t seem to calm down.",2.0062857142857133,4.2558847714285735,3.1442857142857146,90.33071428571432,79.85714285714286,6.857142857142858,24.285714285714285,7.957251820313856,1.3692857142857142,274,10,57,5,7,88,56,70,0.081,0.831,0.08800000000000001,0.128,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,11,7,5,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,7,2,11,7,2,13,0,1,0,0,5,6,0,2,7,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25642939367140805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19590222895542167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303037467444726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21392386954596404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157603498703832,0.0,0.23015022416386266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19784851982964888,0.0,0.13379241211610707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22645269793009676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808784743981316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266247427988421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572690512566168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882499272474584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2886942725325837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21869285192809806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331276728971967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21697766896884133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20450762465752856,0.21409623703927289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490858028111416
mentalhealth,umileee,2020/03/29,"Hallucinations and Delusions, Is It Normal for Depression? Hello. I(13) have been struggling with issues with hallucinations and delusions for around 9 months or so, and I'm wondering if this is just a part of depression. I have gotten diagnosed with severe depression, severe anxiety, and severe social anxiety. I stopped going to the therapist before I could get on medication.   
What I want to ask is, is my hallucinations and delusions normal for severe depression, or should I go to the doctors? I will go into detail about what I am experiencing.   
So it starts out with sometimes a normal day, but a bit drained. Once it gets a bit later in the day I start feeling like I'm not on this earth, like I'm floating. I can barely pay attention to things because stuff starts distracting me out of the corner of my eye. I start to feel like I'm going to pass out, until I suddenly feel very awake. This is where the bad things happen. I start seeing all kinds of things, and hearing/feeling too. Along with believing outrageous things. This might just go on for a hour, but it once lasted for 2 months.  
I'm now going to  show examples of what has happened before. I convinced myself for 2 months the government was going to kill my family. I would hear the people break in, see shadows, smell them, and once felt them hit me. I also believed our water was poisoned and didn't drink water for 2 days.  
Another thing that happened was I believed the sky was evil and cursing the earth. It turned my neighbors house into ants, which i then felt and saw come through my walls and crawl on me.  
Is this normal for a person my age with depression? Thank you in advance!",4.8912499999999985,6.667624342948719,5.515897435897441,78.67076923076927,69.99358974358975,8.276923076923078,28.06410256410256,8.841846274778883,2.2988564102564104,1313,47,233,24,24,424,158,312,0.18600000000000005,0.7559999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.9906,0,0,1,0,1,0,41.0,1,1,2,1,10,18,4,2,15,0,22,8,1,0,1,51,61,21,1,9,8,0,5,3,1,4,4,1,1,1,21,25,3,1,7,2,1,10,2,12,0,0,10,12,31,6,44,45,4,48,0,5,4,0,10,17,0,5,23,161,52,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057918869239792566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594474412309878,0.1108110452794518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644742984002723,0.0677083265335981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06047250017575963,0.044150082601043715,0.0,0.12325800690938843,0.2447971538722685,0.0,0.0,0.15814038494813487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06238839552734871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05782609113252731,0.0,0.0,0.14012590731472652,0.0,0.3119010863088321,0.07351064105843813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741308536729978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07094969056471565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827657864144887,0.0,0.1464825999030528,0.10348198187107724,0.1390802112940926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567896044928951,0.0,0.2881286745115663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19213763134131634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162911659401334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713248031791741,0.08356962480849772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559369638983465,0.0,0.0,0.08012839360887923,0.07542030357148906,0.0,0.05903667636400615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615073164639592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296135268877811,0.0,0.07683230608873029,0.0,0.0,0.1734286972676458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28384754359130204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23139327250095396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843006073538998,0.0,0.050210915850733326,0.06323939656498809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154279376123994,0.0,0.0,0.3272820600286048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382896082086281,0.0,0.0,0.0716309472794235,0.0,0.25631669548357777,0.0,0.0,0.06055119419319535,0.0,0.07571514945517263,0.08291018915359454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667992652407294,0.0,0.08409191154861405,0.24058234656476996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877844988468452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05975885265448898,0.042718600897327264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854266776752651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05144919535136944,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wedumbbutsmart,2020/03/29,"advice? i get a huge burst of rage out of nowhere and if i get too sad or mad i have the urge to hit my head, if i do it i feel fine after, any idea how to stop myself from doing this? i try not to but i eventually fall to the urge",-2.0315757575757547,-0.5337032181818167,1.286818181818184,102.1635606060606,90.27272727272728,4.393939393939394,12.803030303030305,5.46131890053228,-1.4916060606060606,173,2,50,1,6,62,41,55,0.16,0.782,0.057999999999999996,-0.6553,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,3,0,3,1,1,1,0,11,7,6,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,9,1,9,6,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,3,2,34,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.390799873033944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27196117716141005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20221295369738884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4178862509356587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4104361089929816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4514640947404479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343533180272296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715212888681515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LauraC90,2020/03/29,"Anybody else suffer from trichotemnomania? For over a decade now, I've suffered from trichotemnomania (obsessive hair cutting) and was wondering if anyone else out there does too? It's almost always triggered by anxiety, stress and/or feelings of not being good enough. I've found myself standing in front of the mirror for seven hours straight before just snipping at bits that don't feel 'right'. I always strive for perfection where pieces have to be perfectly symmetrical and identical in thickness. It's an endless cycle of cutting, checking, finding a flaw and cutting again. My husband does his best to try and reassure me and ease my anxiety bless him but nothing seems to work. I feel so alone.",7.392122040072858,9.53615830327869,6.622896174863385,71.72365209471768,64.327868852459,9.028779599271402,35.686703096539155,9.444778638647367,3.7282921675774134,571,27,85,11,9,175,94,122,0.132,0.7559999999999999,0.11199999999999999,-0.1499,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,7,13,3,2,4,0,5,1,1,1,2,21,11,8,0,1,4,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,7,0,1,1,2,7,0,1,2,5,8,6,17,7,4,14,1,2,0,0,4,9,0,4,3,56,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18092056103077295,0.1871254804404936,0.0,0.0,0.3006732223665717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764327494780932,0.0,0.0,0.12633261267436802,0.18512355069422864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374166744490714,0.0,0.1896079437852545,0.0,0.1972510109641719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31622095091569874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018626370557545,0.0,0.0,0.1866862400706286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27406510609874024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16513426732431494,0.0,0.0,0.19810152032726414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15154215985458955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779291170756519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17336315528650825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429601457839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16448032251094535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20696334217355847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266690384414865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195935031093402,0.13153402220072544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kaykay590,2020/03/29,"Mental health Recently, I realize I don’t have the best mental health. Does anybody have some advice for me? I feel so stuck in my head and it affects my productive in school. I always focus on the future and sometimes it leaves me feeling detached for reality. So is there anything I should try doing to help keep me focused on school and understand that I need to be more in the present (because how you treat the present moment will effect the future) and it’s hard for me because I know this but my mind doesn’t seem to give these instructions to the other side of my  mind that is in charge of actually doing them. IM IN NEED IF SOME MENTAL EXERCISE TO BALANCE THE TWO SIDES!!!!💕 thank you whoever helps and God bless!",4.11972920696325,5.7856821205673805,4.807672469374598,83.4245454545455,71.76595744680851,7.68046421663443,27.711798839458407,8.296473431620573,1.9071361702127656,573,21,109,9,11,184,87,141,0.028999999999999998,0.809,0.161,0.9599,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,1,2,4,4,0,0,7,0,11,4,1,3,0,24,22,10,0,4,2,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,7,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,3,18,4,17,18,4,14,1,0,0,0,6,8,0,4,6,77,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.1442454339993995,0.0,0.0,0.14444242288964482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229933384740442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163857402587575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802124502204023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551219880759164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293532897357297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14947870246204228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417969452191005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241257880832066,0.0,0.15170011587796828,0.31423937686129216,0.0,0.0,0.1981536185411948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15966480869431274,0.0,0.0,0.13138414119490835,0.0,0.0,0.0812348734154144,0.0,0.0,0.15651400064027654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4468861432898511,0.0,0.29850061107337394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21920486049986768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14594878846458026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29919192537014083,0.0,0.13456458689390613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619212196590778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360875476497467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003562066838964,0.0,0.14439309251034646,0.1538798988976494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SinglePunchMan,2020/03/29,"Feeling worthless and broken I just feel like I’m not worth anything, I’ve hated myself for the longest time. Every relationship I ever had ended with me being dumped, I blame myself. Now I’ve been talking with a girl I really like, we’re hitting it off, but she said that if this doesn’t workout if we would still be friends. Of course I respond yes, but at this point I’m just bracing myself for her to reject me. Just another failure in my life , I feel like I’m just a useless waste of space. This problem goes way deeper than just relationships, I absolutely abhor myself. ADHD feels like it’s holding me back from succeeding in life, even with medication and coping strategies. I feel robbed of my potential to get my desired profession. I feel like I’m annoying my friends and family and that they don’t really care for me. Will I just continue to see my hopes and dreams crumble into nothingness? I feel broken because of this and my hatred of myself grows everyday, can I ever learn to love myself?",4.128015463917529,6.096741737113402,5.31813144329897,78.53018685567012,72.35051546391753,7.9427835051546385,28.10438144329897,8.660442795831766,2.3443103092783506,803,31,141,15,16,266,115,194,0.20199999999999999,0.584,0.215,0.6221,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,1,1,12,18,3,0,3,1,9,4,0,0,2,37,28,10,0,6,11,0,7,5,2,2,3,1,0,1,8,11,0,1,8,2,1,1,4,7,0,0,3,9,32,11,22,20,0,18,0,3,1,1,13,7,0,3,14,98,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675073933217512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676655183652864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10733224647119773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029212363902093,0.0,0.07950852465649581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298142083597986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552169570023688,0.0,0.0,0.08614735935653127,0.2359616389734831,0.1098923575814204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229571886745798,0.0,0.4616430085741737,0.3727150312015541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015387933986567,0.0,0.06814395510007565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287719859185511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12954577985714374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842522224243923,0.31860597486224645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771758585576325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13139385404207296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329789966606372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480327857220598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16711277024084234,0.0,0.0,0.2800646324781384,0.0,0.0,0.12406818532895855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393530977773258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416105197499476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104834175566181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760544062160394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352875159819808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092653272115385,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MR_YTP_yt,2020/03/29,"Im am slowly becoming aids I am beginning to not care about people and i dont know why. My mother is worried about dying from covid-19 but i dont care {not that i dont want to but i just cant} i care about my freinds for now. But thats slowly going as well, when people tell me stories about a reletive dying or whateber i struggle to care, when people tell me about there hobbies i dont care. I seem to piss people off all the time and, guess what im beginning to not care, 😂 whats wrong with me.",-0.7712712975098306,1.329106715596332,1.6280799475753618,97.25727064220186,91.93577981651377,4.215203145478375,17.87745740498034,5.773587663045528,-0.4317606815203141,388,11,90,3,14,131,58,109,0.255,0.691,0.054000000000000006,-0.966,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,11,10,1,1,2,0,8,1,1,0,1,16,21,9,2,1,8,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,8,3,1,0,0,0,14,7,15,21,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,3,6,59,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11730702743219265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6497646399629788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204705021770948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4979365965278935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06036489783647015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700869980483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22946262307848736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058373436487929864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29454670105573416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669489267752653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110398362293428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18567461538994734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061935298382163724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06264884216327486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955007775321058,0.0,0.0958432560786174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786732030870017,0.0,0.0,0.11613032433465953,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,friedrich123,2020/03/29,"I have no control over my emotions like a child. Is this normal? I am 18 years old, but I don't know how to deal with frustration, anger, sadness, etc. I always let these emotions take full control of my body and sometimes I do things that are really destructive. For example, punching a whole in a wall and breaking a $500 TV. What should I do about this? It feels like I haven't changed since kindergarten.",2.41,4.759872000000001,2.9125000000000014,91.9925,79.0,6.0,26.25,7.1686216300943375,1.2152500000000006,320,13,65,4,8,99,61,80,0.247,0.695,0.059000000000000004,-0.9581,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,2,6,3,0,4,0,10,1,1,3,0,11,13,4,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,3,0,2,2,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,9,2,7,11,3,7,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,4,45,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16537650142294233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207672191396247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21025188393831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44583161341879257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20490324140962868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4471355658427357,0.0,0.0,0.2216595644386785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004943241524838,0.1419875375911697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092281852468939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20323605337133346,0.0,0.1941991024582466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19473348421197773,0.0,0.0,0.2085554229505988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732478574873834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16440863032439246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965695212950092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14943578925363507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204113164046222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22189805531343745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798893251824486
mentalhealth,KittyNep,2020/03/29,"I'm just scared Im not sure where to post this, so I'll just do it here.
In a way, I'm scared of life, or more of its 'end'. Im just scared of losing everything I know, Im at the point of where I think this is just a whole simulation to test me on how I react to different scenarios. I just want someone to talk to about this and clear this mess in my head, at least a little.",0.37634551495016666,1.3448521162790712,2.785149501661131,96.97662790697676,80.16279069767442,6.774750830564784,18.09966777408637,7.447530270364453,-0.1325727574750828,286,5,78,4,7,99,53,86,0.19,0.764,0.046,-0.905,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,11,6,0,3,4,0,2,2,1,2,2,15,7,4,0,1,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,6,1,15,7,3,12,0,1,0,0,1,9,0,1,1,49,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818347369954031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541477648305388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641591221992146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17861523042495658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5639791327245735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564782168860367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229295851295278,0.0,0.17443378230320444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947062203636216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164524036170158,0.0,0.16668219212816812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5227331456984433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474635106110073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16403062184751294,0.0,0.0,0.1398867437274464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115177920132902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265328965974838,0.1381448355464677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943094227894913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seigswiththeflow,2020/03/29,Help? Guys i dont know whats really wrong with me but every single day around 4 to 8 my head just starts spinning and spinning and I start imagining things that never happened thinking they happened for example. I went to work on my car today and As i went into the garage to get a socket set as soon as i grabbed it i had this vision of my car falling off the jack and onto me. it felt so real i froze up like i could envision  it play by play but when i went and worked on my car nothing happened but its just happening more frequently over the littlest things and i dont know what to do about it and I’m quite frankly afraid to go to the doctors because I’m afraid of what they are gunna say is wrong. I probably sound crazy but has anyone else here experienced this?,2.6807211538461537,4.212161437500004,3.88625,89.12144230769233,75.25,6.9230769230769225,24.80769230769231,7.61054688173877,1.1147211538461534,610,20,130,8,13,199,99,160,0.07400000000000001,0.8340000000000001,0.092,0.4116,0,0,0,1,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,3,8,7,0,2,5,0,8,2,1,0,1,24,25,16,0,1,6,0,3,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,13,10,0,0,5,2,0,8,3,4,0,0,5,6,19,3,23,19,2,25,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,9,88,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383476225414963,0.1375022965116071,0.0,0.11946518138906885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180620428827777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714664040669923,0.0,0.0,0.08654697737453239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13735792556579102,0.0,0.0,0.3145594553238099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210568744647033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306808537657455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885167486994026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011321535661995,0.0,0.07626814143215435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287768557184906,0.4746854183115226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772645180608634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899504744484477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14750405184161736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06556264395459996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035022122907571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12876714979266227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14468875888552096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273670081933607,0.0,0.15274735545786497,0.08597104197672642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672009129056534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18997288084557434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17831113720965547,0.08598902663954228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720455542468298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732102639140423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19539631834181664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29345014464902097,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LeeSinSTILLTHEMain,2020/03/29,"I'm losing my emotions This is something I really never noticed as it's happened slowly and gradually. Recently I noticed I'm becoming more and more dull. 

For example, I used to be very scared of simple things like height, walking alone at night etc. Normal enough, that simply faded. Okay that's pretty good actually? 

But over the last years I lost so many emotions. I'm not getting happy over anything. I'm not getting even slightly excited by my favorite sports. I used to be scared to death of some horror games, but now I don't even play horror games because they literally bore me. I used to get sad when I hear of people dying. But now, even when people close to me die I really don't feel that much. 

There was even an instance where I landed in the hospital coming pretty close to death with my family crying at the hospital bed. That was about 1 week ago. But I kind of forgot already about it. 

And it's not like an age thing. I'm literally just starting to become an adult.


I just want to be emotional again. I want to feel happy, feel sad and just normal. I dont even know why I'd grief for sadness...",2.785814479638013,4.854778475113124,4.310450226244345,83.84006447963804,76.46606334841628,6.9539366515837076,23.719683257918554,7.908726449838941,1.3558179185520365,877,28,168,14,20,292,124,221,0.242,0.665,0.094,-0.9909,0,1,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,2,18,19,0,2,6,1,9,0,0,3,1,32,32,12,5,4,10,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,10,8,0,1,4,4,0,2,7,10,0,0,4,4,20,9,25,25,6,27,0,7,0,0,5,10,0,1,17,104,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.09815130038979256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08915785538957342,0.0,0.0,0.104170259283771,0.1109922248849984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276854169435585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06131246530700196,0.22216480277363487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664052502224892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048210233918722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20877174499153955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787868572637178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394159505568137,0.0,0.10392574002798056,0.1121729776697814,0.3321597907052615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481761103513006,0.0,0.15256838938093611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15764626124076647,0.0,0.0,0.08436149928547712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894231646356722,0.21413796981086605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336065720278732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473830339019938,0.05527598511545473,0.08198589805862018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982763439001836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252298221432833,0.10979464847301404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197205203364716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393766891068544,0.0,0.07757328255828058,0.0,0.0,0.09438725613706188,0.19709354596437398,0.0,0.22902136147643626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13945863086825142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20465147375175752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288678914873002,0.0,0.09931034197015168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013956970538078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743118428417672,0.0,0.0,0.07119084528766312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336413968736799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26060576050386297,0.0,0.08298880464785317,0.11864905255779172,0.0,0.08067898653815747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075755540816632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477004367352725
mentalhealth,Makironi-Nicheeseno,2020/03/29,"I’ve just been prescribed medication that has a stigma to it and I need advice Hi everyone! I’m 21 and from Ireland. I’ve been diagnosed with depression, ASD (Aspergers, extremely high functioning), and GAD. Last year I went to my GP who referred me to an outpatient clinic because she suspected I had BPD.

I’ve had one over the phone appointment with my new psychiatrist who prescribed me sertraline and queitapine. He mentioned one of those were to help me sleep.

The prescription was sent to my mothers house that I’m not currently in because she works in a pharmacy and because I’m an at risk person for COVID-19. She read my prescription without my permission and she rang me to complain I was prescribed an antipsychotic. Now she’s trying to guilt me off my medication because I don’t need it by her standards. 

Truthfully I don’t know why I was prescribed an antipsychotic and am assuming it’s because it’s violent thoughts I brought up during the appointment or a combination of other reasons including calming me enough to sleep. I’ve never had hallucinations of any sort. 

My mother has guilted me off antidepressants before because I’d be an “addict” to them. I’ve never been addicted to any substance in my life. I’ve drank alcohol but never felt the need to keep drinking it. She did this until I felt too ashamed to take them. Now I don’t want to take my new medication because I don’t want to be “crazy”. I know somethings wrong with me but I feel so guilty just like she wants me to. She’s never ever believed I’ve been mentally unwell.",5.519504439063759,6.967742332203393,6.368571428571428,74.42344632768364,68.0508474576271,9.958030669895077,35.064568200161425,10.181067101454742,3.859999192897498,1248,62,220,32,21,412,150,295,0.098,0.8590000000000001,0.043,-0.9479,1,0,3,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,2,1,7,11,1,4,12,0,21,13,2,1,6,42,43,12,0,6,7,2,3,1,0,0,9,1,0,1,12,10,3,1,10,2,0,3,10,8,0,2,19,4,42,3,34,22,1,25,0,1,0,0,23,9,0,3,14,146,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22359077136272615,0.0,0.10021134428136344,0.0,0.10959549655292697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13947596729807407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4375976279017279,0.0,0.08726308126701325,0.11553950648140933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12915900009011216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832675628722733,0.10408678844512652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046063162727714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596227300939204,0.0,0.0,0.09276296736437348,0.0,0.09799157596759878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05185270855848089,0.0,0.19692948288076445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687375636983074,0.10835043104647356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832972386903458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115176236314793,0.0,0.0,0.11271835108588005,0.08359249701439443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243458288356748,0.05010108554392994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.309927084268654,0.10334697213344447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228120104581221,0.316373646892951,0.19808818472492828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898199884083112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954330416496617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257843849012747,0.0,0.0,0.10543918584152837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20524949539486115,0.0,0.0,0.07894852888563947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15421070779316834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141379031050269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962518474544771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146115624554865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506551409152056,0.09253604411415242,0.0,0.0,0.09885520256262162,0.0,0.07465812137618554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212307735880818,0.0,0.06603928005436116
mentalhealth,Raccoon392,2020/03/29,"Sad bitch hours (mention of suicide trigger warning) So recently I keep going through week-long sad bitch times, I also just got out of a, I don't want to call it a depressive episode because I'm not diagnosed but I'm not sure what else to call it. It started halfway through November and ended halfway through December, a lot of my feeling from then stemmed from my family not likening gay people and anxiety over something traumatic that happened with my dad on new years in 2018 that I link to Christmas. Then a few weeks ago my mother told my dad she has a boyfriend (my parents have split up) and instead of me treating this as a normal thing because I'm happy she has someone I fell into this panic attack induced thing where at first I was scared and anxious about my dad's reaction and I was scared that he was going to send me suicide messages again like he's done twice before and I thought everything was going back to when my parents where together which wasn't great (there was no physical abuse btw it was a lot of manipulative stuff except for the new year's thing), so that made me in this kind of panic attack episode for a few days and then I saw myself in a mirror and I felt like I wanted to kill myself and I got super insecure and I had to move my mirror because u kept crying when I saw my reflection, so that happened and now I can't see myself in the mirror without feeling like an ugly piece of shit and then he sent me a message at 1:20 in the morning about him loving me which was what he done with the suicide threats (that's what he done made super basic) and it made me spiral again and then yesterday night I was weighing out the advantages of killing myself and I did want to feel like this anymore but I'm not site what to do. And I feel like I'd never kill myself but when I get in these episodes it all I can think about.",5.656407272727275,5.637861648000004,6.035860606060608,82.14826363636367,67.18666666666667,8.631515151515151,32.77878787878788,8.150884317080207,2.3378533333333325,1478,59,293,17,22,476,181,375,0.265,0.638,0.09699999999999999,-0.9977,2,1,1,0,1,6,19.0,0,0,0,4,19,31,9,5,16,0,21,5,1,6,3,57,55,32,6,4,10,6,5,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,27,21,1,2,10,0,0,7,10,17,0,2,26,8,44,14,46,29,6,52,0,3,3,2,23,17,3,2,33,208,71,0,0.0,0.09879660330180727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739150332968819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668228855252496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378865983673836,0.09420037481454456,0.08269468807731606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18972305631801414,0.0,0.06411727774139936,0.0,0.15249064352923922,0.0,0.07095378493244209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702891156704266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159359248187507,0.05377588977989072,0.0,0.07181866120688107,0.0846331746989993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25599286087737155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965677224903591,0.0,0.07385362259382522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494031302664979,0.0,0.07860717203401955,0.0,0.16864616182714715,0.17870899757760128,0.08006187709796557,0.0,0.0,0.07092653020278156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043564785917536,0.0,0.14216743178530247,0.0,0.133379871934106,0.09193133894234727,0.0,0.0,0.1474726877218089,0.08876399673106014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211660843817213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411567926575957,0.276756680543409,0.08683177885692912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203686461499594,0.0,0.0,0.07379236421180893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178047457318874,0.07525746662347453,0.2367003460466853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862417379661336,0.0,0.0,0.06431101037805223,0.16106589696991894,0.0,0.07825039251659853,0.0816987799274774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956667086680408,0.18517650011749384,0.0,0.0,0.057808082636820836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233180577722744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16696419612760008,0.0,0.06644638564183779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08559264958447467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065113445529682,0.06419320585464909,0.0,0.0,0.05901974286929922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545492219806702,0.27362623604810915,0.0,0.07858859097356619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661902070759385,0.053429207571711525,0.0,0.06619771482227035,0.04862197857493301,0.0,0.0,0.07967714531098449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14754642704446885,0.0,0.13377149888295733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037936181303175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739333991044236
mentalhealth,OtherEgg2018,2020/03/29,Feeling lonely I have been feeling extra lonely since being inside. I don't really have friends locally and now I feel extra alone 25 F. Just been playing Animal crossing all day.,3.5331818181818164,6.626745272727272,5.1487121212121245,72.8430681818182,81.12121212121212,6.936363636363637,26.431818181818183,8.07648339933343,2.6398545454545457,146,6,20,3,4,49,26,33,0.267,0.602,0.131,-0.7149,0,5,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,6,9,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,3,3,2,0,6,3,4,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4423828189902145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754665996244359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.647916542084006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3300032744730782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27363347996561305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35333030711570856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tramelo,2020/03/29,"I've just hit myself in the head 30 times with the palm of my hand I've also made some holes in my old wardrobe today. 

This quarantine is making me crazy, angry, dark. I can't even do simple stuff. 

It's 1:30 p.m. and I can't sleep because I'm stressed by the THOUGHT of things I have to do and that I won't do because I'd rather be STRESSED about them then actually DO them.

I regret telling my band I would record a section of a cover. Everyone else did their part and I'm the only one remaining. I don't know why, I can't sit down to do it. I'm considering saying f you to everyone and everything because I'm becoming crazy here.

Edit: ok, I calmed down a bit and maybe now I will be able to sleep.",0.9793609022556424,2.6724619736842143,3.0061278195488725,92.84789473684212,80.57894736842105,6.448120300751881,22.04135338345865,7.447530270364453,0.6341300751879699,548,17,129,8,14,185,94,152,0.11699999999999999,0.826,0.057,-0.8143,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,3,0,7,5,0,2,7,1,17,5,5,2,0,15,26,7,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,6,6,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,3,2,19,2,14,17,4,11,0,1,0,0,7,5,0,1,5,79,25,1,0.16541006018081314,0.0,0.16141635804843504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322783653655875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024973122166557,0.1826824158612902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18058494488746135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381788803257352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925178472999557,0.0,0.0,0.3161128019903369,0.1486598963882639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16975844254903175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090504322858786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565149983910225,0.11041249960086004,0.0,0.16617663807481445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735700331926895,0.0,0.11208613762452344,0.12580180443028696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17912297608312722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13154071892946462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3310590346961342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789533301497295,0.0,0.1893549448968564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445756833415546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10989109406694286,0.0,0.0,0.13131711130054902,0.0964519362838998,0.0,0.1567893961607301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492568514241385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175025609059751,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cryintheclub,2020/03/29,"Psych wards/hospital experiences? I’m pretty much freaking out, got a ton of mental health illness/disorders and I can’t receive treatment or help where I am and there are no psychiatric hospitals where I am and I feel like I may do something to myself. 
Can someone tell me their experiences at psychiatric hospitals/wards? Did it help? What was it like?",3.9368571428571433,6.884217938461537,4.732967032967032,77.66846153846154,77.30769230769229,8.637362637362639,30.824175824175825,9.23628265651192,3.4378791208791206,286,14,48,8,7,92,49,65,0.075,0.706,0.21899999999999997,0.8611,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,9,1,0,0,0,7,12,4,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,1,8,2,4,8,2,5,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,2,35,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949966776790135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5035629020463458,0.0,0.0,0.13014651703967225,0.18388285742875501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20586209122521687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27359857786830416,0.0,0.0,0.3450525441708731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515001420261461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2593933633108926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892147539697477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618629909894876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180897323636176,0.1981550500545916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22497435247165756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,al_dahlia,2020/03/29,"Mental Health decline I am a long time sufferer of anxiety and depression. I'm on medication and have a routine that helps significantly. I am currently quarantined up at my parents lake resort with my immediate family (mom, dad, 4 younger brothers, grandfather). I had the option to go home (I live with my aunt and uncle) but knew it would be better to be up in the fresh air with my family whom I love/like very much. This quarantine has completely thrown off my schedule and I'm am started to feel an increase in my anxiety and depression. I haven't been able to see my best friend in about two weeks, I miss my room, my bed and my cat. It's starting to take its toll on me. What should I do? I'm trying to get back into my routine, but that is difficult due to the circumstances. Any advice would be great. Thanks for sticking through my post.",2.6826204819277137,4.973076343373499,4.2369728915662686,83.16461596385547,77.73493975903617,8.246385542168673,26.64006024096385,9.017664075816787,2.3703626506024094,667,27,131,17,16,222,110,166,0.098,0.733,0.16899999999999998,0.9531,2,3,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,2,10,0,0,6,0,16,2,0,0,0,18,29,8,0,3,2,5,1,0,1,3,2,0,3,0,8,10,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,5,0,1,3,2,21,5,24,20,3,24,0,4,1,0,8,12,0,1,9,87,29,0,0.1628141240694092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910007770076715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11071918750140997,0.0,0.2491047185424868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251940114932693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708633783776352,0.14399586178994095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17070751141843624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804631329742182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30697333217334,0.0,0.08232371314655418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578978837812838,0.0,0.08506365992111106,0.0,0.0925310187616068,0.0,0.0,0.17950314657087424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306380035410102,0.0,0.0,0.1091308753892843,0.0,0.16331584149386608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14376785444631882,0.14408537633973315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14694610366045108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16401810108533882,0.16407834277129735,0.0,0.0,0.19068593433208225,0.0,0.0,0.11968711482423368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18078581702653976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15593092487770285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974177726761502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304813500320509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241595883244835,0.0,0.0,0.14989737067567407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493822506137496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054010284333736,0.0,0.15904574139829894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433870363172934,0.0,0.0,0.1305996695319095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313169647469588,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Glum-Goal,2020/03/29,"Pls help I’m 16 and extremely suicidal and depressed I’m 16 depressed and extremely suicidal before I continue writing this I do have low level autism which could be the cause of some of my depression here why I’m depressed. My whole life I struggled with depression usually I’m able to keep it under control but certain things can trigger it (yelling, feeling left out, etc I also talk to myself. When it gets really bad I start to hear voices saying I’m worthless or I’m being selfish for living or nobody likes or loves me. I have no friends, no freedom at all in my life, and feel like nobody likes me all of which adds to my depression. 3 years ago I tried to kill myself (overdosing) but survived I think about trying to do that again but I’m scared of what happens after u die. My insecurities also add to my depression( feeling ugly even tho some people say otherwise, I’m too fat or skinny even when I’m average,etc) it’s a lot more reasons why I’m depressed but I don’t wanna make this post to long. Do u guys think I should kill myself? After hearing all of this I’m constantly in pain mentally due to my depression, feel as if no one would care or they’d be happy I wasn’t here, and I feel as if I have nothing to live for. Pls give me advice.",2.191380208333332,4.255747460937503,4.057500000000001,84.97083333333336,78.296875,7.079166666666668,25.510416666666664,8.07648339933343,1.6906541666666668,994,38,196,18,24,336,140,256,0.28300000000000003,0.563,0.154,-0.9927,0,0,0,0,1,2,22.0,0,0,1,2,12,27,2,3,2,0,16,6,2,5,4,45,44,23,5,6,11,0,5,3,1,2,4,6,0,1,12,9,2,2,8,0,0,0,5,19,0,1,1,11,27,8,29,36,9,22,0,11,0,1,12,8,0,10,16,125,39,0,0.08412828225905587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220918375940031,0.07457464621256417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455471385571152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702436016456141,0.0,0.0,0.07158697186168285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577439061920412,0.08642292008194734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091278600222333,0.09435702212657013,0.06716958780322503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6521360961181072,0.0,0.0873118748420706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18765054605187564,0.11113187399875953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126889364111416,0.06010126165549514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499730218411938,0.0,0.04395355521355622,0.08070351419502775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833002260661604,0.07439436216376429,0.08955612082381703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18963737672654396,0.0,0.056389414250164326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477708273292574,0.18615095935528292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140562483049593,0.0,0.1188445874569141,0.12330248768429156,0.0,0.14857362907265442,0.0744508824366109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152285712080599,0.07592905932623349,0.0,0.056156281674737636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478152133396735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072335577988382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700750131579412,0.0,0.08951842380856087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058323958179823325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057163919903294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053894731842935285,0.08649788570793365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13380437342880286,0.0842270868388164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05954643118885219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794914682557149,0.0,0.18404537243732907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06761912655713563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589109253279025,0.10781201264090147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423516265683273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265541735415753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518253788431233,0.09392622274807193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597623179584964,0.0,0.0,0.05417585552075195
mentalhealth,Matt_aroni,2020/03/29,"Online therapy? Has anybody tried it before? If so, has it actually helped at all or is it just another waste of money?",1.4481159420289842,4.115035260869568,4.843478260869572,73.99246376811597,87.69565217391305,8.284057971014493,25.057971014492754,8.841846274778883,2.9116492753623184,93,4,16,3,3,34,20,23,0.132,0.868,0.0,-0.5171,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,3,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.43668143374836427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4692277101964278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3807773204931822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999401916852204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5117388277345706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038133756140488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Goblin-blue,2020/03/29,"Looking for some advice on whether what I'm experiencing is a symptom of my depression, or something seperate that I should seek help for. I am trying to work out what is going on with my mental health and I really want some advice from maybe somebody who has had similar experiences and felt similar things. 
I guess I'll start with actual diagnoses, several years ago now I was diagnosed with severe Depression, generalised anxiety and I'm not sure what the current medical term for it is, I think it's changed, but it was something like EDNOS (Eating Disorder)

I have been down many paths of treatment for these, and they're not what this post is about necessarily. There's something going on that I've been struggling with for a couple of years now, which could be a symptom of depression or maybe something separate that I need to speak to doctor about. I've always had a bit of trouble describing it in a way that sound right when I go back over it, but here I go. 

My body doesn't feel like it's connected properly to my brain. Sometimes it feels a bit like I'm floating, sometimes I feel like I'm in a mirage. Sometimes my body is moving but I feel completely frozen and not in control of what's happening. 
The places around me start looking odd and unfamiliar even when I'm in my own home or another place I frequently spend time, even though my brain sort of knows deep down where I am it doesn't feel like I'm really there. 
I almost feel hollow or translucent some days, ghostly even? I'm not really sure. I often hear that somebody is talking nearby but as hard as I try to pull myself back into reality to make out their words, the buzzing sound of a far off voice almost puts me in more of a trance. 
If this makes little sense I'm sorry, im just trying to be as detailed as possible.
I've heard the word dissociation, and it is the closest word I can find that seems to sort of fit, but I'm almost certain I don't have DID or BPD which is all I could really find when I looked up dissociation.
I have no sign of amnesic dissociation though I do have a history of repressed memories of trauma, and I sometimes go into a state where for however long, there's not a single thing that will stick in my head longer than a second after it's happened. I'll do a series of things, or get told something, and by the end of it it's as if it never happened, in my mind. It's like my brain gets tired of trying to remember (not that I remember things that well usually) absolutely anything. 

I find that moments of high stress or confusion trigger worse symptoms, but there's other more obscure triggers like certain songs or if there's a large area in my vision that's all a particular shade/colour. Sometimes reading books for too long can do it as well.

If anyone has the time to try to help me a little that would be so highly appreciated, 2 week Quarantine isn't so good for mental health and it's been on my mind.",6.805442157953284,6.187899267241378,7.311256952169077,75.96847052280313,64.94827586206897,10.587319243604007,33.1924360400445,10.011982343527217,3.067706340378199,2325,84,455,45,31,767,258,580,0.10099999999999999,0.813,0.087,-0.7837,2,1,5,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,1,2,30,23,0,4,24,0,41,17,6,5,7,97,83,42,1,10,26,0,8,7,0,3,10,7,1,0,44,19,1,2,15,3,1,8,12,9,2,1,11,19,43,14,74,64,12,73,0,3,3,0,9,36,0,25,33,300,87,4,0.0,0.0,0.05695442327046968,0.0,0.0,0.11406440624669277,0.0517357815289137,0.0,0.17532804809726754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048563163939927684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611992898057593,0.04464796973141463,0.0,0.0,0.040809163729152935,0.0,0.04802824352218267,0.05195594926787237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975596236652585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743580033330618,0.12965753372930175,0.07350687071580886,0.1954591314592616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061740916155082676,0.0,0.061193090579177524,0.0,0.0654597042075764,0.09319711983801177,0.06457817784065284,0.0,0.0376396730283653,0.0,0.15080536665556818,0.11847558584568813,0.0,0.0,0.06688970524976448,0.05973758486997476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05972050049058581,0.0,0.0,0.05169279797637824,0.0,0.0,0.11564575856740555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057090768542903424,0.0,0.0,0.17706224149831726,0.1250848338089834,0.05603817785887163,0.0,0.16002973127537415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060985110769844364,0.0,0.16584680326641627,0.04895259175329447,0.0,0.0,0.0642940500605527,0.0,0.15483213116090974,0.0,0.052282293107558,0.0,0.05989785860347629,0.1240754870485618,0.06577998281128848,0.0,0.07823973868744696,0.12332862783667554,0.05854341732539268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06304266862140198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032075090604558036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19959443868882135,0.1169912554848632,0.0,0.10329984207759876,0.1470320935060774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791626961043202,0.05917149737413654,0.1172680971991288,0.0,0.0,0.05879515454793205,0.11763349846597293,0.0,0.11786113208711732,0.0,0.0,0.062031236261588574,0.0,0.04327584611068416,0.04501358160063183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195501290498195,0.0,0.0,0.06579615357312064,0.05589616491302024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05867150591246083,0.0,0.0,0.05837936195745291,0.0,0.14955678444590326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13222909037287794,0.04984216813369871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05313200027671817,0.0,0.1318684385021484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22465562995808114,0.2886153052612085,0.06533323602108326,0.08262006757717405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06685526989348085,0.061014273307481375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001394417135699,0.1819862823242152,0.0,0.04691042514321099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15509664474688828,0.037397017722911,0.11468381835999505,0.0,0.06806453163465931,0.0670803357275007,0.0,0.05576889028920315,0.0,0.19812515775428868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427922455094927,0.0,0.034424344523098345,0.04632628363592593,0.04681573377100783,0.0,0.10495171353433767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04248937257222204,0.0,0.059477461877189865,0.04145980413704379,0.0,0.0,0.07516844846637437
mentalhealth,Th3darkn3ss1nside,2020/03/30,"coronavirus spiral i’ve never really ranted on the internet before, but i guess it could be healthy. for the sake of backstory, i’m a new yorker with a history of mental health issues. i’m autistic, and recently after 6 years of struggling with a form of psychotic depression, managed to get past it. to do this required for me to finally leave my home, for me to take care of myself again. it took taking pride in my appearance, and feeling a need to do things. this is cultivated by my school environment, and my travel alone to and from school allowed for me to feel free from the stresses of my home. 

i don’t face any form of abuse in my house, rather i have no space to myself. so as the virus’ radius and severity moved closer and closer to my home, i figured there’d be school closures, but i was never truly able to prepare. everything was dumped upon me, and i’ve been in my house for almost two weeks straight. i swear im going mad in here. i feel such an intense dissociation, which i try to recapture through watching the news, staying updated and all of these things. i’m constantly suffocated by the people around me, while they always have solely pure intentions struggles only intensify when surrounded by my family. everyday i wake up to do the same thing, just within the same 5 feet of space i have to myself and my possessions it feels. 

i’d mostly forgotten what it’s like to feel trapped, i’ve worked on managing my time and leaving time to myself, yet all i feel is a constant lack of motivation and drive despite all of the work i put in prior. all of the things that worked for me before can no longer even be attempted, as everything is virtually closed. i can barely take care of myself, and i feel like a wreck every single day. i have so many people i can talk to, yet even for the smallest escalations in depressive symptoms prior i’d be close to being sent to an emergency room. 

in all, if you somehow managed to understand my scatter brained thoughts, thank you. my mind is in a cluster now and has been for weeks, and i can only wonder what is there left for me to truly do. if anybody else has similar struggles or what not feel free to PM. thank you!",7.368314438502673,6.560566628235296,7.797737967914442,73.56445721925138,63.89411764705883,11.115508021390376,34.61229946524064,10.436869588844218,3.4848117647058823,1727,65,324,36,22,571,216,425,0.151,0.752,0.09699999999999999,-0.9782,1,2,0,0,1,0,44.0,0,3,1,7,16,17,2,4,20,0,30,6,4,3,8,63,58,25,0,6,8,0,8,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,17,19,0,1,13,1,2,8,6,8,0,1,7,9,46,11,68,45,12,58,0,2,1,0,6,24,0,9,27,234,63,11,0.08297049057643106,0.09830646389804903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308296124976326,0.08593240564645645,0.0,0.0,0.06903809478701074,0.0,0.0,0.056422778771328085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386132737853562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120355283031188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262250747201067,0.0,0.0,0.16918788967199486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17932324901267313,0.0,0.06624518535501576,0.0,0.0,0.05350910244437103,0.0,0.14292472391125854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931119833579549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960245302479897,0.0,0.06990621679855873,0.0,0.14913705392395965,0.0,0.07821719433089774,0.0,0.3356189841579645,0.05927413504609026,0.0,0.09089011686094084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334865684547421,0.0,0.047154041850291435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140134954575738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819375160769116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496785011453686,0.0,0.0,0.19147361258779586,0.0,0.0,0.0896223676302121,0.08659963575159464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1757075390546942,0.09014768077967134,0.0,0.0,0.08107038138856705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411905471106088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361473963339151,0.0,0.08377654325406085,0.0,0.0,0.08818450078912603,0.0,0.06152156744715492,0.1279839146020802,0.08013341682056886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620559375374552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920472156190222,0.1150425824133188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.083408259632582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053153020844095435,0.0,0.08192334980966028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519116981392989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373303774016806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843550337942735,0.0,0.0,0.09504241662727607,0.2602163147261005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623810854235413,0.1871504493255593,0.06668853745901128,0.0,0.15277616057161938,0.0,0.0,0.2204876287391037,0.0,0.0,0.06586930162395394,0.09676152057225493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218326791068122,0.05633151677535616,0.0,0.08105011320936402,0.08637520680157394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331078456751437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997795774597109,0.18121051594024587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053430275636832975
mentalhealth,Infamous-Record,2020/03/30,"Can and do social workers and psychiatrists speak with your employer if you’re committed to a mental hospital? 

If you were committed to a mental hospital and your social worker and/or psychiatrist wanted to get insight into who you are at your job, can they contact your employer or supervisor? Does this happen and is it legal? If this does happen, does the social worker or psychiatrist have to let you know that they spoke with your employer or supervisor? I’m in the US.",8.200697674418606,8.733223720930233,8.955209302325583,61.49327906976745,61.7906976744186,12.461395348837213,34.64186046511628,11.979248473330829,4.719677209302327,384,15,59,12,5,130,50,86,0.0,0.922,0.078,0.6868,4,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,8,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,8,0,0,0,2,18,15,10,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,11,0,9,12,0,3,0,0,0,0,18,3,0,6,0,47,16,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4976081418585579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902781171389892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352225253740877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880910737929358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041672628941108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19381941898275054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38202727814329795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5796422457018457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279955496425744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179671446931017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rainbow_of_tara,2020/03/30,"Disassociation or split personality? Hi all,
I find myself frequently having out loud very in depth conversations with myself and am noticing that there are two very distinctly different sides that argue (and sometimes) help one another. 
I feel to the extent that there is another person but I know it is me.
I do get bad anxiety and depression and notice one half of me step up and the other one fall away when they can't cope. The part of me that is depressed and can't cope feels pushed away and forgotten. The other part tries to explain why it has to take over...
I find that sometimes the conversations unsettle me because it seems like one side of me knows more than the other does and makes everything seem mysterious and weird.
Am I going crazy? I feel pretty stable and these two parts usually get along very well and it feels normal to me. But it seems really strange when I try to explain it right now...
What are your thoughts? I'm going to see a psychologist soon but was wondering if anyone else experiences this?",5.110156250000003,7.030177619791669,5.688458333333332,77.07737500000002,69.67708333333334,9.286666666666667,27.38333333333333,9.725611199111238,2.6345870833333334,821,28,149,20,15,265,116,192,0.138,0.789,0.073,-0.9301,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,0,8,7,1,0,7,0,13,0,0,1,2,39,34,18,0,2,5,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,17,14,0,0,15,0,0,5,2,5,1,7,2,6,18,2,18,32,6,21,0,2,1,0,11,10,0,7,7,108,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22250231509309049,0.08116333262180353,0.0,0.0,0.07418495733830394,0.10870813497671852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993618184846079,0.0,0.08858592812403318,0.0646752826921143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18276107078924814,0.0,0.0,0.11084798857425868,0.0,0.0,0.09284553393044268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862979391446002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953524587055356,0.10378248025064797,0.0,0.0,0.2145817855838361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939400811431476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086181208610987,0.0,0.12059387549982074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111407275104162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661543686186986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05183326336549991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082006354470406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395178809244014,0.0,0.24158254315586716,0.0,0.0,0.2875742300100002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34467566428750873,0.0,0.0,0.18527828756644898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079380175954299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796796760777155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060560861249876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454496634931757,0.2897580945289984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098637869679153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977116806994887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422856289306775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406476421026845,0.0,0.20728121870545468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685001836106995,0.26262152601459315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953932607244871,0.0,0.09573535370136303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505684569517667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arisfren,2020/03/30,"I don't know what to do Half a year ago I had a fight with my only friend and since then I'm so stressed to talk to her and things between us are awkward. Also there's was this accident in my family that made everything worse. My two brothers are secretly addicted to weed (it is illegal in my country), where one of them has depression. My parents fight all the time and it's stressing me so much. Now I want to talk to someone reliable but some time ago I noticed nobody wanted to listen to me, so I stopped talking to anybody to 'protect them' from me and my problems. I don't want to go to therapist because that would be a another difficulty to my mom and I'm not ready to trust someone new. 

I'm from Poland in my freshman year in new highschool with new people (I think high school is a English equivalent to Polish school where I am). I apologize in advance for my english",4.3503745318352065,5.129360235955058,5.508483146067415,81.98927902621723,70.23595505617978,8.854681647940074,33.372659176029956,9.075114841892004,2.8693468164794007,694,33,139,13,12,231,105,178,0.184,0.7609999999999999,0.055999999999999994,-0.9666,1,0,0,0,2,0,13.0,1,0,2,1,8,9,2,3,5,0,13,1,0,1,1,21,24,11,0,5,2,3,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,7,7,0,2,3,0,0,2,3,7,0,3,3,1,25,2,27,19,3,22,0,1,0,0,16,8,0,1,12,99,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14181316008546835,0.0,0.0,0.2306271357383812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402988761149504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640672374145285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792993404620765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204305394939797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691308908199485,0.0,0.12263369253913925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050427588163316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393098563191551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744321314940078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149197379519713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309070834925255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235538590182438,0.0,0.0,0.09562832534236962,0.0,0.0,0.37691418943938254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14810400157514275,0.0,0.0,0.0881497761758643,0.09893641745599224,0.0,0.0,0.14444533108922106,0.0,0.0,0.09018539210764348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447492543772375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633083599320036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760864940022394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22044323122532813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875788856616987,0.2980266065166691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136750813651714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15104010527587838,0.08642349135244412,0.08335398468632679,0.0,0.0,0.15170861937692967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12707531571038766,0.0,0.15647768221612762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301846345723919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256895197435978,0.09240950454239197,0.0,0.0,0.16754249627029882
mentalhealth,gingerkitty1,2020/03/30,PTSD and suicidal ideation My brother took his own life and I suffer from PTSD where I see his body the way we found him and recently I see my body being cut down instead of his. I wonder does this mean I'm moving on or am I in serious danger. My heart tells me it's the second one.,3.259098360655738,3.5614574918032784,4.865696721311477,87.33985655737708,72.44262295081967,8.067213114754097,25.08606557377049,8.07648339933343,1.2218491803278693,221,6,50,3,4,75,46,61,0.23199999999999998,0.768,0.0,-0.93,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,2,0,2,4,3,0,0,8,9,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,4,0,2,2,2,14,0,5,6,1,8,0,1,2,0,7,4,0,2,1,34,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4393864098183133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17308192855996174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21685971843177534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23437474491716914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970054091796238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21544453097106486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21021286934606687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402341563237202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4623973357002607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19528763304008864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3152161489370022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163433660137368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17287175122162446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21974506948267505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699156741259415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144880847135451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Oceorest04,2020/03/30,"I can’t keep thoughts in my head It’s like the opposite of intrusive thoughts. It mostly happens with anything even mildly stressful or confusing, and even if it’s something I do genuinely *want* to think about.

I know that sometimes your mind can get foggy or you can find it hard to focus or you can lose your train of thought, and I get that, too, but that’s not what this is. It feels like the thoughts are getting pulled out of my mind, leaving it completely blank. My mind will be completely clear, I’ll be putting all my effort and all my focus into this, having these thoughts be the only things on my mind, but they still get pushed out.

It’s been happening for about a year, but it got a lot more frequent and noticeable very recently. For context, two weeks ago I left an abusive home and have finally started the process of getting support, and I started questioning whether I might be a system (specifically OSDD-1b). So I’ve been very tired and confused and under a lot of stress recently, as you would expect.

It happens a lot when I’m trying to process things, mainly. Which is causing a lot of problems day-to-day, as well as just being generally distressing.

It’s consistent. I’ll try to think about, say, what happened that day or what I want to talk about in therapy or something, but I’ll have barely started when it gets forced out of my mind. I’ll still remember thinking that one sentence, but I won’t be able to make it any further than that. Usually, even when I’m struggling to think of answers to my own question, I’ll repeat it in my head or try phrasing it differently, but when this happens I can’t even do that. My mind just goes blank, and I can try again, and the same thing will happen. It’s exhausting.

Anyone have any idea why this might be happening, or how I can stop it? I think not processing so much is really affecting me, and the whole thing is just really distressing.",6.530871951997957,6.35233804021448,6.52212945231712,79.93803395889188,65.38069705093834,10.107442869909358,34.92008170560449,9.725611199111238,3.1690264011234524,1511,64,297,28,21,480,175,373,0.131,0.8220000000000001,0.047,-0.9859,1,0,2,0,0,0,50.0,0,5,1,2,24,14,0,7,13,0,33,4,2,4,3,85,69,36,0,6,20,0,2,2,0,6,2,1,1,0,36,16,0,2,18,0,0,3,5,10,1,2,8,3,30,4,36,48,13,36,0,1,0,0,10,11,0,19,23,210,66,0,0.0657057923631559,0.07785061965966182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05824422046928339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936438390914554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04594301775608597,0.0,0.054070268618539516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06749794825046243,0.0,0.0,0.1377825463755116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712440110896764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864856825447105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17359222467911214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03322282285697479,0.046940231192876665,0.0,0.07197748386007961,0.06005390385913035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20597138761907088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052550924491179055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40672390633019,0.0,0.058859484024503576,0.0,0.1348661981723073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590826706309218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07417384184146886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05840232725116961,0.0,0.0,0.03611018512787016,0.0,0.0,0.06957294694511762,0.07138953565512267,0.0,0.0,0.06420106244173752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07350797476359025,0.0,0.22344286002313926,0.0,0.0,0.043859126616245935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940692459408235,0.3980647180252733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04830131759228543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480648010051254,0.0,0.0,0.044523945384546376,0.049972215908579865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287156953045271,0.0,0.06605246938659677,0.1472110498474735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418562616161547,0.0,0.1297530863055255,0.0,0.07443185416872944,0.0,0.0,0.0522518833245803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116705811146537,0.06498470873992156,0.0,0.13952069406149722,0.0,0.10494546131369677,0.054932984526222486,0.1505315263105915,0.06868996043498397,0.0,0.0,0.07456215452484218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05281182701032573,0.0,0.0,0.07514029988385414,0.0,0.17460803536205052,0.21050809331348488,0.0,0.2608152986405888,0.0,0.07551914260892262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843967989238785,0.0,0.06418501171376133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723656474435919,0.1084283199337053,0.07750995742833645,0.0,0.05270522332142508,0.0,0.059077398282915125,0.0,0.059289257725513064,0.07335817068434225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04667550970350615,0.0,0.0,0.04231237603284935
mentalhealth,Random_Account_346,2020/03/30,"Unsure about my Mental State So, I've been having issues for some time, and I'm trying to figure out what to do about it. Figured I'd make a post here to see if there's actually something wrong with me or if I'm just over-reacting.  


Over the past few years, I've had a few ""Freakouts"", for lack of a better word. These usually only last a few days, but have lasted for about a week and a half at most. During this time, I kind of just... shut down. I can't really bring myself to do anything, and just spend the day swapping between lying down in bed, pacing around my flat, and opening random apps and games trying to get myself to do something (It never works, I just end up closing them after 2 minutes). Sometimes the freakouts just happen randomly, other times they start up when I'm stressed or have a due date coming up. But after a few days, they just.... stop. I feel normal again, and its like the past few days didn't even exist.   


I've had a few friends say in the past that I have problems, or that I should see a doctor, but I've always just ignored them. It never really made sense that something could be wrong, because I've seen people with ""actual problems"". I have friends and family that have serious mental issues, to the point of being suicidal. Comparing myself to them or saying that I had a similar problem always felt wrong, almost arrogant, like ""How dare you say that you are sad or depressed when the people you love are actually suffering"".   


About a month ago, I had another freakout, and it was worse than usual. There was a lot going on at the time, and all of my issues compounded, and I was a complete wreck for a couple weeks. I started to believe that there was something wrong, and started talking to family and friends about seeking therapy. Most of them seemed happy (Though my family tried to convince me to try a million other options before considering seeing a therapist). After all this stuff about Covid-19 started though, plans to see a therapist had to be put on hold.  


But the thing is, I've been fine for a while now. For the past few weeks, I haven't had any issues, and it feels like I'm just back to normal again. It was like none of it ever happened, and all of a sudden, I felt bad for even considering seeking therapy. So I went about living life like normal, not really sure if something wrong or if I was just having a bad couple of weeks.

​

Which brings me to today. Out of nowhere, I feel like shit again. I went to bed last night completely normal, and all of a sudden, I wake up feeling like shit, spend most of the day in bed, and even after getting out of bed, I just can't work up the energy to work or play games or talk to my friends. Is this normal? Is it just me having a bad day every once in a while? I feel like I'm going crazy trying to figure out what the hell is going on in my own head.",5.413429132637237,5.495962101933216,6.075604776181122,81.31089088183606,67.69947275922672,8.662483200661635,27.9830972810917,8.313332769828598,1.8055313346428201,2232,64,440,28,34,730,234,569,0.16399999999999998,0.7170000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.9861,0,0,5,0,0,0,88.0,0,3,6,5,39,40,3,1,37,0,40,7,4,3,8,100,77,41,1,15,28,0,7,8,4,1,2,3,4,0,27,26,0,3,11,3,2,9,8,20,0,2,21,15,42,20,77,51,19,92,1,3,5,1,21,27,3,22,62,312,69,4,0.0,0.0,0.154701447401246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046842134613200366,0.0,0.052914635272636866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793922485719816,0.057255372672838964,0.06421003372127597,0.03593505473135759,0.055410497079502234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04348528971277507,0.04704147685876058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04063300821270525,0.1323651030655051,0.032212604720342236,0.0,0.0449655042672047,0.05953596980862552,0.0,0.046735342728600096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04551956884020287,0.11080976846578176,0.0,0.0,0.042190838758035636,0.11693955750128085,0.0,0.20447619562559516,0.0,0.04551360184714238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408705366484089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0468032168411185,0.0,0.0,0.10470691715041776,0.0477995223672907,0.04452250990507583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149447043574661,0.0,0.1335950526900468,0.15100421024407462,0.1014751413111144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16330549499223407,0.0,0.055216577070271375,0.0,0.0900956906905844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934577877045595,0.0562523602875438,0.0,0.0,0.0542321672318495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061746820811076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055027856885123023,0.0,0.12922230317672462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03732457642399871,0.2065313801078229,0.0,0.04666134059259175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04492523225150805,0.04769287416899451,0.0500013280021872,0.03527311545115557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650663829414277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04217878157955779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151156458632698,0.0,0.0,0.049589579498341384,0.25887462106159725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05627607456875939,0.0,0.04018948568028472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20177850621956528,0.07326937073081731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04995371907541537,0.0,0.05060899060264603,0.0,0.0,0.15169085445182298,0.0,0.05312181427808765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155774430628604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12606863304698349,0.0,0.0,0.1684361300789343,0.04810628612693714,0.0,0.0,0.10848516830487813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034056304770144,0.052263082071814654,0.0,0.14961020063217975,0.0,0.0,0.04417911743259058,0.06053148245575615,0.0,0.060492596913746435,0.05780166952500745,0.0,0.04980390582602666,0.0,0.0,0.08494640979155561,0.0,0.0,0.12086116059848248,0.12270960085721112,0.035106543752650265,0.0,0.1038359661112382,0.0,0.1232527221583886,0.0,0.05008898894859656,0.0,0.0,0.17938465478870316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639820643532554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695498812242139,0.0,0.0,0.09797198809577597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541100863893175,0.0,0.05385153550151308,0.0,0.2888776467795573,0.06421003372127597,0.034029162000379816
mentalhealth,Best-Mission,2020/03/30,I need help Everything is shit,1.1950000000000005,3.7673618333333367,2.4833333333333343,87.94500000000002,97.33333333333334,9.066666666666668,22.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.789866666666668,25,1,5,1,1,8,6,6,0.387,0.32299999999999995,0.29,-0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5313892744714144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.396311285905935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4384141999580658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6069232183031533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Androgynewitch,2020/03/30,"COVID-19, Nursing, and Mental Health Hey Everyone!

I'm a RN (registered Nurse) in the US and I work in a long-term care facility (nursing home). I work with the more vulnerable population since the average resident is over 65 and are medically fragile and/or have conditions that make them more likely to develop serious illness from COVID-19.  Don't get me wrong, I am very thankful I still have work and an income (so many of my friends and loved ones have lost their jobs or are unable to work because their job is deemed ""nonessential""), but it has been rough working through this with Hypochondria, OCD, and CPTSD.  My anxiety is really high and it is getting harder and harder each day for me to go into work.

I never really wanted to be a nurse, my ex-wife pushed me into it when I told her I wanted to be an ultrasound technician and she decided that wasn't good enough (I won't go too much into it, but the situation I was in was abusive, so I felt I had no choice but to become a nurse). My hypochondria has been around since I was a kid, but during nursing school it became really bad. I finally found a job that I like okay and that doesn't cause me too much anxiety in regular circumstances, but with the pandemic going on, I can't seem to handle it like I use to. (DON'T WORRY, I am a nursing assistant instructor, so I don't do much direct resident care.)

When I wake up in the morning I panic (this has been a problem for a while) and usually a few minutes of grounding exercises helps, but they haven't been able to lately.  I will sometimes throw up because the anxiety makes my stomach sick and sometimes if it is really bad, I have to pull over on the side of the road to throw up. I am also in constant fear that I have COVID-19 and I don't know it yet and that I will end up getting residents sick and end up killing people. I am also afraid that if I become sick, I will not be able to work and therefore my household will have no income and I will end up losing my financial footing that I just regained after two years of hard work since I got divorced. I also have been going stir crazy not being able to be outside . Before this I was outside a lot because I walk most places due to living downtown in my city. I am on edge all the time and I am starting to get really absent minded (forgetting paperwork, thinking it is a totally different day, having a hard time coming up with certain words when talking, ect. 

I am just wondering if any of you have any tips/tricks on how to combat this? I know my position is needed and I want to make sure that my companies facilities have properly trained nursing assistants to help manage resident care with all that has been going on.",6.59236499674691,6.155143650943401,7.256076772934289,75.59141509433965,65.32075471698113,10.706571242680548,34.313597918022126,10.245366335075165,3.3987996096291484,2125,85,406,45,29,706,244,530,0.151,0.773,0.076,-0.9923,6,0,0,0,1,0,60.0,1,1,4,10,18,24,1,3,25,1,61,11,3,7,6,75,96,40,1,8,14,0,5,3,1,6,7,0,1,1,23,30,0,0,8,1,0,11,14,11,0,2,17,5,62,13,58,68,13,63,0,2,0,1,17,30,0,8,25,295,85,14,0.2113966018431037,0.08349013511864438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690537861184414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583795890111453,0.0,0.16171782179203034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627292647742032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767155499802237,0.12886540637123625,0.15564729209880318,0.0599609793576826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21553292442400845,0.07238751398895224,0.0,0.060699818051160724,0.0,0.07614820885790967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908888798561817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362148515096566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872346433973112,0.07280973319252984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733283742114511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929331627573244,0.0,0.0,0.06765796306115687,0.0771915481116184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726182087445617,0.05444149673067932,0.0,0.14726133252005685,0.0,0.20023593410672835,0.059103146660717996,0.05635772464700861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624655515146194,0.0,0.0,0.07490156746948584,0.0,0.0,0.09446312411087457,0.0744507054420218,0.07068267595799849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097785082985061,0.0,0.07795967297570047,0.0,0.07745202924948015,0.0,0.07948819155562616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327770160573066,0.0,0.06222235746424825,0.06235978012267801,0.0,0.07883290810195084,0.07692145429164568,0.05990727709099546,0.06359789554592732,0.0,0.1411088732517872,0.07144099142008188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098661210214975,0.07101268454882008,0.0,0.07115010182146635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554008259594365,0.05224930055668185,0.05434736384284074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477492694653147,0.0,0.0,0.08267612144018069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04885192880117613,0.0,0.07362148515096566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742599940972059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22571012710008176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131488233038634,0.0,0.06414917560561735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17486945355682254,0.0792062125473531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938442974662812,0.0,0.04987586761229574,0.0,0.056273866434675135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06641293182036846,0.0,0.0,0.05663752700017648,0.0,0.0648751963159838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04515146888013195,0.0,0.0,0.08217803902743548,0.0,0.0,0.06733283742114511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06883458762435984,0.0,0.08476136114672897,0.060859596751853574,0.07760783034774259,0.05814144525456678,0.12468719286415555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641686570784982,0.4103979836350826,0.07156117020230594,0.0,0.0,0.07704299950697185,0.0,0.04537749355903877
mentalhealth,brainsamaze,2020/03/30,"mental health varying in cycles hey,

im a guy thats almost 23 years old. for almost a year now my mental health has been varying a lot, it pretty much goes in cycle. the different steps of the cycle are always the same although the intensity varies a bit. my thoughts during these steps pretty much goes like: 

1. high energy, high on life, very social and i like talking to people. generally motivated, school and training is even fun to do because i see it as a development. would pretty much say that everything that has a positive effect on my development motivates me a lot.
2. the motivation from step 1 is fading. im not feeling bad, im just ""living"" and doing what im supposed to do. im starting to see it as something that has to be done and the feeling that doing stuff that develops me does not motivate me so much. 
3. starting to feel bad out of no where, whats the purpose of doing all this school shit, training is boring and doesnt really have an effect so why even do it. everything that im trying to get better at, im not getting better at, why should i even continue doing it? Nothing is improving, ill always be bad at everything, and the things that im actually getting better at are just baby steps anyways, its taking too long so its meaningless anyways.

and back at step 1..... im starting to think ""hey fuck feeling shit and fuck everyone im just gonna do my thing"" and my motivation is on top again.

the worst part is, when im starting to feel good, i know exactly how and when i will start to feel like shit again, and it will just start all over again.

what is wrong with me? am i bipolar or something? i know i have to go to a doctor to get a proper diagnose but i just wanna know approximately what it could be.

​

if the text is messy somehow please let me know and ill clarify.",2.679643595041324,4.608218895316806,4.567395833333336,82.52109375000003,76.30027548209367,7.4025137741046825,25.393336776859503,8.278499904357787,1.7255592975206608,1421,51,278,26,32,484,169,363,0.085,0.789,0.125,0.8928,1,0,2,0,0,0,51.0,0,0,0,11,24,19,5,0,20,0,36,13,3,8,3,59,65,24,0,5,11,0,6,3,0,5,8,1,0,1,26,14,0,0,19,0,0,6,5,11,0,0,3,9,19,8,34,52,12,41,0,0,2,2,6,16,5,7,22,190,45,8,0.0,0.0,0.05575815476401697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443030969816645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508629024066616,0.061908676050394414,0.06942856174475881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04393536579994554,0.14312278312960466,0.03483061269666853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516009620418525,0.06237957185271885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045619805566381975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05799356460841025,0.0,0.059696737262278615,0.0,0.058482858944788385,0.05000158790710541,0.05847170674850102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321673952138615,0.0,0.0,0.0545975226716966,0.15405504640735962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17334323301708865,0.04081918559706114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564576925637696,0.11940836371768808,0.0,0.03247267268332065,0.04792439340694996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05657530797876125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146941031113068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073823810128274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6789037512923899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560554656172646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058427171308974186,0.0403580485582568,0.08374378491777068,0.0,0.05045363751853203,0.0505650680923291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715286164809923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11516272900790245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16801114074455545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05482516590889908,0.0,0.05995640646439038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187456304296879,0.0,0.03961208813458855,0.0,0.0,0.06272003846883803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17438875237746762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0366038748805446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04543819382691278,0.0,0.11565280935687695,0.09106270141514207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17595308948303975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05824469148531554,0.0,0.0879747887135939,0.0,0.0,0.24265415660719175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06540899850882978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04296044089412252,0.04592512038546399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591950040569202,0.036611532207155316,0.0,0.045360952902075716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03879274891871908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04714458794594832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311577738360064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04058898401237476,0.06247110731377625,0.06942856174475881,0.07358961327824141
mentalhealth,squeesqueeesquee,2020/03/30,"I’m having issues- but I don’t think I’m bad enough to do anything about them I’ve definitely had a couple weeks here and there of depression in the past two years. I get out of those slumps and life returns to normal- albeit I’ve never had good sleep schedules, and always have issues with lack of motivation and concentration (but that’s a whole other topic to unpack maybe another time). 

Although, I think I feel ok. And don’t think I’m depressed. But I’ve had sessions of cutting myself three times in the past three days. And even tonight, I’m looking forward to when I can put the phone down and pick up the knife. 

I know it sounds bad- but I don’t know what do do. Because I enjoy it. I enjoy the blunt knife on my skin, and the feeling of the serrated edges irritating the skin. I haven’t severed the skin fully yet, but there’s still angry red lines on my arm from the day before yesterday. 

I’m a bit confused on what I’m doing because I don’t think I’m depressed. I feel all my emotions, and I feel happy, and sad, and I like talking to my friends. And I should be ok- but I want to hurt myself. 

It started late last year, but sometimes I’d break down over the smallest things. I remember my dad asked me to clear out the dishwasher, and I got so overwhelmed I started hyperventilating, and then I got so angry I flung my chair across my room and took anything not immediately breakable and hurled them at my walls. When that was over I curled up into a ball on my floor and sobbed, big, loud, ugly sobs. And I couldn’t stop. I couldn’t stop crying. It happened a couple other times, but none since January. 

But I have this thing in my head that I’m not bad enough for help. “Other people have worse issues and don’t get help- why should I get help when my problems are so much smaller?” That’s what runs through my head whenever I think about it. Sometimes late at night I think about it, what I would say and to who, and I wake up in the morning and thank god I didn’t do it because it would be embarrassing. 

I have two friends with really bad anxiety, and one friend who used to cut themselves. The friend who cut didn’t get help why should I? One of the anxious friends isn’t getting help, and his problems are so much worse than mine why should I be allowed help? 

Sorry for the long post, well done if you made it this far. This is just trying to get my tonight’s in order, sorry. Do you guys have any advice?",2.604474648158863,4.346099935222672,3.496333140543669,90.9448448043185,75.96356275303644,6.081280123385388,23.705224599961443,6.7636006534598385,0.6058010025062668,1904,59,408,17,42,607,226,494,0.214,0.634,0.152,-0.9904,1,0,0,0,0,3,57.0,0,2,2,1,18,33,3,3,21,2,41,9,8,5,3,79,79,43,0,14,13,1,7,1,5,6,1,3,1,1,29,29,0,2,14,1,0,4,15,19,1,6,11,12,56,14,48,57,9,65,0,8,2,0,25,28,2,2,33,263,85,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819589827890626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05806909792677206,0.0,0.0,0.0474581443170024,0.07317866597768533,0.05338752906981481,0.07884042808973518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485894040142867,0.0,0.06524223721498072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330798236162055,0.12762611230786905,0.0,0.05938433673617416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619027848026111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15443790019942244,0.07665869754514833,0.09001480470751555,0.0,0.18032456894772075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141722022239694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850195987959876,0.0,0.14421904911805614,0.0,0.046094229550704136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114737462902438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695896738936233,0.0,0.2187676882266008,0.0,0.0,0.05853475378596975,0.11163146879767337,0.0,0.0,0.06910096273481367,0.06171318242852715,0.07429048467174583,0.0,0.0,0.1432449756013319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806640267442085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470935757500728,0.0,0.0,0.2185212125738564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670717581869899,0.056886428020241485,0.15744751284767053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04929323602658657,0.034094827865232415,0.0,0.0,0.06176006831890436,0.058604233768240414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06603496942218029,0.0,0.0,0.07011129493504513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026042278018304,0.0,0.053824707163544976,0.0,0.0,0.0654911878678204,0.0683772946399876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458013285339233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324083600018946,0.04838212152665495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668374877320649,0.0,0.0,0.13355513190786142,0.0,0.07015608428141774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044707896155330426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07905605169309814,0.0,0.0,0.05549811482333339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884042808973518,0.0,0.05772924673196145,0.0,0.06983826936022794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804397460684306,0.1562436123426453,0.09879242630875812,0.0,0.055732682647970544,0.11669156741726608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056092845902652816,0.0,0.06425129384348807,0.0,0.0,0.09272791887140627,0.26830349278814103,0.0,0.0,0.1220816035912134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753689072720991,0.047381382323534366,0.0,0.13634521565088245,0.0,0.0,0.06027431215859187,0.0,0.0,0.041162693510856815,0.0,0.05597961928973921,0.0,0.06274767577280159,0.0,0.18891809196241025,0.07791566391166088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14223960211714054,0.09915060021364706,0.0,0.0,0.08988219961114655
mentalhealth,Jessency,2020/03/30,"I think I have ADHD but I don't know what to do about it. I've been noticing that since elementary I have had difficulties in many things such as studies and my general lifestyle. Often times I'd find myself in situations that are our of control when it seemingly could've been easily avoided, be oblivious to certain things that should've gotten a reaction out of me and etc.

My brother has recently diagnosed with it and I took my chances and did my research and to my surprise I fit the bill. If you were to make a checklist out of the symptoms they would all be marked. It was like the time I read my Zodiac (I know they're unproven but it's somehow creepily accurate).

So here I am, unsure of what to do. My first instinct is to see an expert but they would be costly so I'm not entirely sure of my next step to knowing more about myself.",3.2043697478991566,4.936126882352943,4.6939495798319335,83.03705882352945,74.29411764705883,8.151260504201678,28.61344537815126,8.841846274778883,2.3267563025210083,670,28,133,14,14,224,108,170,0.077,0.823,0.1,0.6041,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,1,2,2,9,5,0,1,6,0,20,2,0,2,3,30,30,13,0,3,5,1,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,12,8,0,2,6,1,2,2,2,1,0,1,8,1,24,4,20,17,3,13,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,4,7,103,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264139222767817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21130077218230056,0.150417906904161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19121674224619295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21010998645127005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218942146650115,0.16024850884345315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.310610542528663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920401763165042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12575498265345866,0.19100274340822498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20035999234500096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144887126849827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18844576843798333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860171231902739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15012625299304375,0.17150753768241667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15584211390745756,0.21176363304592669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17755985636991095,0.1958143178677452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503222493488472,0.12071577190615665,0.0,0.0,0.21970902965011466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20931353933724506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676605015172171,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sxhatc,2020/03/30,"I completely lost the ability to feel interested into anything I mean literally anything, no romantic interests, no hobbies, no real relationships, no plans for the future etc. I don't know how long I'm able to do this anymore, I'm only feeling bored, depressed and suicidal. Life sucks and I can't seem to change anything because I'm not able to get interested into anything..",7.946304347826087,8.38942185507247,9.094021739130431,60.58711956521742,62.33333333333334,12.117391304347828,43.33695652173913,11.698219412168324,5.736591304347826,304,18,46,9,4,105,45,69,0.287,0.542,0.171,-0.8634,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,1,7,1,0,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,12,14,3,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,1,2,4,3,7,13,1,4,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,1,2,26,5,0,0.3609380215573121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178976765222635,0.0,0.0,0.5940424756582512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001223391787084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19091228406694724,0.0,0.1892183242348055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543769453982448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012706518467592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18250110867348152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428760954811573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918104865158127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747059941568012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597093955105315,0.0,0.0,0.19700324379819406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19658365904137012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13725481494224934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20541324396069924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937561789343948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642922094708647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974038064861284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Solid-Statement,2020/03/30,"My Garden/My Soul/My Health My Garden has been left unattended for a very long time. I don‘t really remember when I began to neglect my garden and began to visit it less often. At one point I forgot about my garden, the plants have all died because I wasn’t there to care for them. For a long time I felt that emptiness inside of me, I felt the absence of my garden and yet I couldn’t figure out what has been the issue with me. I grew sadness and jealousy by looking at other peoples gardens, how beautiful and nourished they where. I went back to my garden and started watering my dead plants hoping they would sprout, but instead of beautiful roses I grew a bunch of weeds. My garden seemed to be lost for good now, I was barely holding on to it. I was so busy mourning about the garden I once had but that didn’t bring it back either. Even though it seemed hopeless at the time, I slowly began clearing my garden out and day by day I removed some dead plants and weeds. There was still plenty left, but I took action and everyday I could feel a tiny result. There were some days on which I couldn’t visit my garden, which felt like a setback, but that was not true. I started appreciating the amount of work I have already put into that garden, maybe there were no flowers yet but at least I was doing my best to restore it. One day, with a lot of hard work and patience, I managed to grow a flower. That flower was barely standing, but it was everything I could hold on to. Knowing that its there, growing by itself in my very empty garden, made me happy. My garden was nowhere near my goal, but I had a whole life in front of me to work on it and to make it the beautiful, stable and peaceful garden I had always seen myself in.

— Me

Everyone has their own little garden within themselves, please do not neglect your plants and know that it’s never to late to save yourself.",5.020725806451612,5.635876663978492,5.522204301075269,83.07830645161292,68.65053763440861,7.382795698924731,26.79032258064516,6.996647511020387,1.2742612903225807,1477,42,282,11,24,475,178,372,0.11599999999999999,0.7490000000000001,0.135,0.9097,3,0,0,0,0,1,37.0,0,1,4,6,21,14,0,0,15,0,31,3,0,4,4,61,55,23,4,6,10,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,15,0,22,17,1,5,10,15,0,13,9,6,0,2,29,7,50,8,47,20,12,59,0,6,2,0,7,21,0,7,25,220,72,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273469569814027,0.0,0.09254444733019077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17104354942924474,0.0,0.06779904430021713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671915595880555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339681224518625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760119498892765,0.0,0.0,0.2869123389413447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542942137818883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734601561102292,0.0,0.0,0.10627604775538507,0.09995790204252902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05623647621331563,0.0,0.3203676477353463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328656087550292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839639483479925,0.0996318099615402,0.0,0.0,0.1182222948893648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046714934513747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608540841620996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222478641110153,0.0,0.12546167910491204,0.0,0.24168301056369204,0.0,0.07855839763431098,0.05433676627084668,0.1114722580133433,0.0,0.1968534588519152,0.0933972907953625,0.0,0.12141042116762732,0.09455577523335336,0.0,0.10523961914042823,0.07424061288559351,0.0,0.111736039873565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578018180067368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844630714759237,0.15073191139237255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710635875543903,0.0,0.0,0.1220868178143418,0.10513941489543432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180742044351226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125076312031163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599125650739126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20250211074545355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15744502359382254,0.0,0.0888209133262156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927367295271752,0.0,0.19456087552418275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12357017684517545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835372828206698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031026087265024,0.0,0.1241738258817545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24290976018162075,0.0,0.0,0.07900792182788716,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,killaburnz,2020/03/30,Gf feeling suicidal My gf is talking about worrying about killing herself should I call 911 and report it,4.886842105263156,8.00827373684211,4.883421052631579,76.97144736842105,74.78947368421052,8.010526315789475,41.078947368421055,8.841846274778883,4.608663157894737,87,6,13,2,2,27,17,19,0.42200000000000004,0.522,0.055999999999999994,-0.8957,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,9,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4395713004847631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176651525385691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4762656869577783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.470878560276284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3460059499317878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4371764090971356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,potatoAim31,2020/03/30,"What’s the point in living I always get dark thoughts come night time and I’m only ever happy if I’m gaming, doing something actually productive or when I’m with my friends",1.9195714285714305,4.5051923142857175,4.005357142857147,81.93089285714288,83.0,5.785714285714287,23.035714285714285,7.1686216300943375,1.2108571428571433,141,5,25,2,4,48,30,35,0.0,0.805,0.195,0.7783,0,0,1,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,7,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,2,6,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,4,12,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.3100947410147891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26440758908744244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737281224136863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28743843237622313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455059860133259,0.0,0.166020135434664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382688666692333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805940714103376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982027913097588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416761128528088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.300392514219457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446325513947776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522714928764233,0.18529248561881312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shimshontheacused,2020/03/30,"School doesn't care about me at all [UK] 
Girls at school made up sexual abuse allegations against me messaged them my gf, gf kinda gone for now feel terrible 8 weeks been going, girls snitched they didn't get done for tho cause I go mental at these sort of things like screaming and shouting because they refuse to sort it out reasonably. I've had to move sides of the year and have to stay in at lunch and break and go in at 9:15 isnted of 9:00 and have to leave at 3:30 isnted of at 3:05 also got excluded for 2 days now what's great cause someone's said I've held a pen to there neck what's just Great, now I've got to go to therapy or something been thru that done nothing realy. School jsit want me to forgive the ones who hurt me now what's fun and luckily I'm in quaritine now cause of coronavirus still not great tho cause of all the shit they expect me to do work for teachers I don't know about subjects I don't give a shit about",2.6099048223350247,4.1216938071066025,3.3479156091370577,92.98958914974621,75.39593908629442,7.158502538071066,22.464784263959388,7.865858978985527,0.7590307106598986,748,20,170,11,16,236,115,197,0.10099999999999999,0.747,0.152,0.9149,0,0,1,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,4,1,14,12,2,0,5,0,14,4,3,6,2,28,31,10,0,2,3,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,2,8,7,1,2,4,0,0,6,7,5,0,1,12,4,13,7,36,19,2,30,0,1,0,0,14,13,2,4,10,98,21,5,0.0,0.1373157764246722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268061775759953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064808037900211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181619473977581,0.4762214205412196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474222606110799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372001821639303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05859963267561043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060549980496461576,0.11117635847117342,0.26346157155848043,0.0,0.1853824935469221,0.3833215747123928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406722896072955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06369246807988321,0.0,0.0,0.12271531388813675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056620093552344264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966197457247537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167941805455768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317728371390715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120369204112507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853296681126562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11915862703604925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024200445758216,0.0,0.0,0.3518736108373233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379276359943852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09819685149879567,0.08922108259321812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352788747082365,0.09255332562241976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253521506239674,0.0,0.07699501317569453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06835745194736154,0.0,0.09296340470578424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437241969648387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07463211972780125
mentalhealth,Avocadosandwich69,2020/03/30,"What is wrong with me? Can someone please recommend a good book to help. Hi friends,

I’m struggling with some mental heath issues and I’m wondering if someone can recommend a book that can help with the following:

- I find it hard to get motivated and stick to something
- I feel overwhelmed at the thought of change and doing new things
- I can’t seem to find a passion/ hobby I love and want to pursue doing . Eg: Getting good at something seems too hard and I get discouraged easily
- I dislike problem solving

I think i may have a confidence or self esteem issue? But I’m just not sure how to get the right information so I can begin to fix this, so if you can recommend a book that will help I’d greatly appreciate it.

Thanks so much 🙂🙏🏼",2.21387755102041,4.5794928367346985,3.7245170068027207,85.81453061224491,79.81632653061223,6.913197278911565,26.126530612244892,8.021203637495839,1.7709069387755108,585,24,115,11,15,193,91,147,0.111,0.5870000000000001,0.303,0.9841,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,6,13,0,2,8,0,12,2,0,2,1,31,30,13,0,4,6,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,7,8,0,1,10,3,0,1,2,5,0,0,1,3,11,8,13,27,2,6,0,2,0,2,9,3,0,8,2,69,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524517705587153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286754040521619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634321764158856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134085352648508,0.0,0.3011710448620149,0.0,0.0,0.24174922404721536,0.0,0.1588843880539189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581927399035131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897864358132929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30083172907698363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13006703338083325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14523136547818435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059391679759727,0.0,0.0,0.13918461740489754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581920975326756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378960677971958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230711698767369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623889640758115,0.15034062348179975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24421187360894905,0.2218894741831495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506575310886953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582419584561295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267930097978745,0.0,0.0,0.09574184986171724,0.09234138267648782,0.0,0.11440911805603375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500120503050754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15628370935173258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756424489543566,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wickedwitchofdawest,2020/03/30,"Disassociated and Dazed Well obviously like the title says, I’m disassociated. I am searching for answers on how to get through this and all I find is DBT and grounding. Grounding doesn’t work well with me. I try my hardest and nothing. 

PLEASE HELP ME. I hate feeling like this. It’s so intense and scary.",1.9282758620689648,4.752740017241379,3.5133620689655167,82.78659482758623,88.48275862068968,4.968965517241379,27.9396551724138,6.6274283507984215,1.428062068965517,243,12,46,3,8,80,44,58,0.213,0.601,0.187,-0.5758,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,2,12,7,7,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,7,4,5,7,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,29,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15084522875765413,0.21312788328400967,0.0,0.0,0.2726693304906472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558657493609468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945403161940915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19996512831380567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914991297458394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862568517706924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3274780925398355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23724496040106466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20254731550572413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5364711901067425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21718868137632635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,randomftw18,2020/03/30,"Stopping bad patterns of behavior I am starting to notice that I have this terrible pattern that leads me into having fights in my relationships and I am not sure how to deal with it. 

It usually starts by me trying to find something to complain about my partner or to complain about our relationship, (usually triggered by simple things they say or do) and then proceeding to think so much about those things and how the relationship is making me unhappy to the point where I start a conversation about the topic with my partner. It obviously leads to a fight, usually with no logical conclusion. Then I feel bad about it, but at the same time the fact that we had a fight and the person still wants to be with me gives me a strange sense of comfort and reassurance. After that, things become nice and stable for a few days, I start to think about how great my partner is and how I like him. Then again,  I go on finding a new reason to start fighting again. 

I think this need to find something that is wrong is a habit that I have, and it comes from growing up in messed up conditions. I grew up always expecting the worst. It feels like it's something that shows up in my head and it keeps on growing, like an outside voice that just doesn't shut up no matter how hard I try to get rid of it, and it only goes away when I fight with my partner. It's pretty annoying.

This is something I finally managed to notice that occurred in all my relationships to some extent and it's more prominent in my actual relationship because the circumstances of our relationship are also peculiar (we are temporally doing a long distance relationship, which makes me terribly anxious at times). 

For context I had a hard childhood involving family fights and parents divorce, a case of pedophilia in my family that  indirectly affected me, and a lot of mental health issues with members of my family that I was surrounded by (me and my sister were raised by my mom alone, my mom had issues with alcohol, my dad was barely present, we were always having to deal with fights between my mom and my grandmother which happen to have undiagnosed schizophrenia), so I grew up terrified of trusting people and believing things turn out ok sometimes. I am aware of most of my issues and faulty ways of thinking and I have been successful at becoming more stable and secure (been in therapy before).

I truly want to be the best version of myself that I can, although it will always be an ongoing process. But this particular pattern is being really damaging to me and my relationships. I really like the person I am with, and I feel like he is a tremendously patient and supportive person but honestly shouldn't be putting up with issues like this because they are really unhealthy and no one needs a bad relationship, so I also feel some guilt about having said issues. He also already calmly told me that he thinks I need to be more stable, because I do have a lot of mood swings, and I am either excited or really in a bad mood (this is mostly because I am going through this pattern, it's what causes my mood swings).

I absolutely hate this pattern and I want to find a way to stop it because it is obvious that will only lead to bad breakups and a lot of pain for everyone, and it is truly unhealthy. 

Has anyone dealt with such issues, and if so how do you try to break bad patterns of behavior? 

TLDR: I have an habit of starting fights in my romantic relationships and going on a cycle of having a fight, feeling guilty, being OK and then doing it all over again. I don't know how I can control it or stop it.",8.29543536301783,7.296014790629577,8.519082335716135,69.76432843854968,62.14787701317717,11.783463956592884,36.92571699250711,10.966923227221727,4.058174610283352,2854,115,506,64,34,942,275,683,0.185,0.675,0.14,-0.988,1,1,5,0,11,0,58.0,5,1,2,7,29,52,11,1,32,2,58,4,1,17,6,120,96,58,0,9,11,6,7,6,4,3,3,3,0,7,50,47,1,6,18,1,0,12,7,28,0,1,11,10,74,21,96,75,20,76,0,1,0,0,56,30,0,13,37,398,124,5,0.0,0.0,0.04773806950033163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052279733262345404,0.0,0.05066552412252493,0.05398353892932757,0.11736196768826615,0.12211404640044643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05526475663023474,0.0,0.03420543273875645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045961186185992715,0.0,0.24507286501995906,0.14910341067507266,0.10805479655609547,0.04162662477729321,0.05511517142672034,0.05133766832320349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05025348010752765,0.0,0.042139547704734,0.0,0.0,0.05486702751940031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031548828410830516,0.10086706681947047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04674437923705088,0.0,0.0,0.13834996645407205,0.0,0.1236750531559646,0.06989575344544835,0.0,0.053588577832476905,0.17884500143712204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025558255963639444,0.04692774140658287,0.08340570336188449,0.0,0.0,0.05393357598993336,0.0,0.0,0.043259075203244346,0.0,0.08764396507547081,0.04829756905391084,0.05020519869641738,0.0519988078527592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3063535276011597,0.0,0.04348162080215329,0.0,0.0,0.026884705639776716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14339666158411982,0.0,0.0,0.0432919407949702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476802938893394,0.0,0.0,0.06530787391535127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049299034235391885,0.0,0.0,0.1718806805225026,0.0,0.0,0.03596123090711372,0.10881887116160033,0.0,0.04724645530868246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138963648778807,0.0,0.0,0.03314890691770946,0.07441049167220251,0.05205346366282348,0.0,0.054318967587864836,0.0,0.0,0.03391440452836852,0.12814304066534574,0.0,0.0,0.046244443469951935,0.0,0.0,0.049768399595868776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04917729416093297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535553448096162,0.05029707136307282,0.0,0.5252089897575466,0.0,0.0,0.04653334889242815,0.03890250070252562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506415194570537,0.048382326464756716,0.0,0.20775151261164052,0.0,0.039066925656270166,0.12269589150586073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05551291330048524,0.046105754490019385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05594335329238777,0.0,0.12999893565833207,0.15672719770012142,0.0,0.0,0.05705034227548051,0.0,0.0,0.04674437923705088,0.0,0.0996387498023425,0.05321002758542548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616327185582263,0.0,0.08656141122927101,0.07765954673622562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0534854511475386,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rainbowsixsiegeboy,2020/03/30,I have to ask if this part is bipolar or autism? I get mad over stupid shit and will head bang over it but wont physically hurt anything in the room im in.,0.6864761904761885,1.9906283142857149,2.4457142857142853,98.30761904761906,80.14285714285714,5.80952380952381,20.238095238095237,6.42735559955562,-0.24947619047619085,121,3,32,1,3,40,31,35,0.177,0.725,0.098,-0.2349,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,0,4,3,2,0,0,4,6,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,4,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,5,1,2,0,19,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30217222092686274,0.0,0.3432800554939252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918455164437079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3768505286814429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3930924736648238,0.0,0.3966362663603724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3976390642039673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3769229141720434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cscimc,2020/03/30,"I don't take therapy serious and I hate it I don't know if this is the right sub, but I think it's okay to post this here. So I've been suffering from depression probably all my life, but after suffering from psychosis 2 years ago, I realised that I need help. I have been to a therapist up until last year, where I didn't really got taken seriously (probably because I always told her I'm doing better than I actually did and felt uncomfortable talking about my problems). I stopped seeing this therapist then because to her it seemed like I'm doing fine which I didn't. After my depression got way worse again, I decided to look for a new therapist a few months ago, and tried to tell the truth as much as possible, so I finally got to talk about my suicidal thoughts, self harm and alcohol abuse. But I'm also supposed to do stuff at home like meditating and writing down my thoughts but I never do anything, because I'm lacking the motivation. I also found myself trying to tell her that I'm doing better than I actually am. I really wish I could take therapy more serious and actually find the motivation to put any effort into it.",7.8420587036282114,6.628276385650227,9.037439869547494,66.37656746840607,63.170403587443936,13.131512433754587,38.20994700366897,12.24349002098031,4.836483408071748,906,40,166,28,11,316,123,223,0.201,0.649,0.15,-0.9628,0,0,1,0,1,0,19.0,0,0,0,5,9,17,1,0,7,1,16,2,0,2,3,33,40,19,1,6,5,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,11,7,1,1,11,0,0,1,5,10,0,0,14,3,28,7,25,25,5,24,0,4,2,0,11,6,0,2,17,112,39,2,0.0,0.11851258541384688,0.2928282251304222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17733123213161744,0.1068956890642464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15997899023978565,0.08322833291755949,0.0,0.0,0.06802003778061141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231157768580498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18292188002520984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17692694789832614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986136288845024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17230177832303933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603913222583424,0.10957186649422906,0.09142051073779534,0.0,0.0,0.1096716172827054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399960059880349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875340982017483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06704426246729625,0.0,0.10033265199352777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054970807143028516,0.08153325501508488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065020820158345,0.09773376152365472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399532371920776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983854033421392,0.0,0.07352946003232799,0.0741668424208206,0.07714500150573787,0.09660421124800048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11276250824704218,0.09579574815080684,0.0,0.2156864916226268,0.09570986443851197,0.0,0.10055217227809234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815641358685592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542031091499408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970651510926653,0.09105847825476644,0.1043472879459224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362489661819285,0.0,0.0,0.11450403396574654,0.10941048439374083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15041183615309445,0.16079168507031308,0.1748515093173806,0.0,0.2287732903588301,0.34840819425833874,0.0,0.06409161159714473,0.0,0.1588164384176208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557762284957834,0.0,0.13582003519635166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939473140698901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502315035968222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193343259779344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288248982622844
mentalhealth,friendlygal98,2020/03/30,"Why do i feel small around some people ? Hi everyone ! Longtime lurker, first-time poster in this subreddit.  
I have something I feel like I don't understand. It's been 1 year since I started therapy and I changed in many ways: I have good self-esteem, good control of my emotions and recognize my bad coping mechanism easily. However, I feel like a small child around people that hurt me in the past. It frustrates me so much. I'm killing at my workplace, with my friends and with my SO but somehow, when I talk to some people I regress to my old ways-: I start oversharing and diminishing my success.

I feel like I want to overcome this in some ways, but am I just trying to win an old battle (to prove myself). ? I know this is super specific, but I feel like I need some guidance. Do I ditch them out of my life or try to overcome this?

Thank you for reading this.",2.5562647058823518,4.726390670588239,3.5466911764705884,88.55886029411766,77.58823529411767,6.838235294117648,26.507352941176467,7.865858978985527,1.5975000000000006,674,27,136,11,16,216,102,170,0.071,0.71,0.22,0.9792,1,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,1,4,7,16,3,0,3,0,8,1,0,1,1,30,21,11,1,2,5,0,5,4,1,0,1,0,0,1,8,9,0,1,8,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,5,31,11,19,20,5,20,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,6,11,87,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221894774810367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041992976225018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201743104500574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996912460358385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14037850131400706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192477547582564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31550258339439324,0.35661663718917885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615126139953887,0.0,0.0,0.09641694156161787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093456271375025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13359650722857064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13806808564881198,0.0,0.0685845194054666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814697886451303,0.2438757374017721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652337478760806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173928746105812,0.09253451982281938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619044419741907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913173187153035,0.2595531265991633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482959229679336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018925802588546,0.0,0.0,0.10323239254979867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607391980503273,0.0,0.0,0.17666224853071566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10030615355755357,0.0,0.11489522492264233,0.14271489712023902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16945634098728524,0.0,0.0,0.12991685058814265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360780844152623,0.29717134129246753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126088175015402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036441698762124
mentalhealth,WeegeeGamer,2020/03/30,"Hypochondria is ruining me. I’m aware many people are suffering from depression and mental health issues (no problems with that, i support those guys), and this may seem less important. But i just want to talk about this to someone. I feel disgusted with myself at the state i’m in. 

I warn you, this is a little gross.
In 2019, around when September kickstarted a new school year for me, my already slightly annoying problem with hypochondria went spiralling downwards. It’s developed into such an issue where it makes me do disgusting things because of my overdramatic concern for my own health. I began spitting regurgitated food and drink whenever i felt supsicious of it onto things i shouldn’t instantaneously. I can’t control it. I wash out cups 5-10 times before i use it for ridiculous reasons, wash clothes more often than necessary, and my whole life has basically began to revolve around my health. Without a slight consideration for the mental side of things. It’s causing problems in my household and i’ve been feeling just simply disgusted at myself for the past few weeks for what i’ve become. I want to solve this. I want to become normal. I want this to stop. It ruins my day time and time again. I don’t get what i’m doing wrong.",4.839217391304349,7.242087747826088,5.209782608695651,78.19380434782613,71.52173913043478,7.9043478260869575,29.76086956521739,8.697196308434329,2.611973913043478,1002,42,169,19,20,318,141,230,0.188,0.758,0.054000000000000006,-0.9866,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,1,10,15,5,0,7,0,11,9,1,5,0,39,29,8,0,9,4,0,3,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,19,13,2,2,6,1,0,1,5,14,0,0,5,3,27,1,32,22,5,29,0,4,0,0,3,14,0,3,13,116,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540232162932288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023237653586457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927264952371058,0.2510084114540529,0.09669753951290808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673749443672235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12745464206858087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328708724677471,0.0,0.0978762138824427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132194457523108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491754042795625,0.0,0.10911026848714807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374114799563659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0593711471719699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251945279973696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3623755327654448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372170255505256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026585629096382,0.0,0.113895096024978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585422493680666,0.1152110616718867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290406842461753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975225600198768,0.0,0.0,0.11134107937604172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848029726341,0.07878225749707088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32620855989821634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683875576112825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500768876479946,0.0,0.10345173660092803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628508010006326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500642822100183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289550175175016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133789280430177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264880461371441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19878963605346608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814671682639874,0.0,0.0,0.2681064671923276,0.0,0.09115352205137464,0.0,0.0,0.10534353327556256,0.0,0.1268727311588003,0.0,0.1095429443593244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242452769921918,0.0,0.07317912454776604
mentalhealth,soleilsscribbles,2020/03/30,"I need advice on my mom How can you make your parent less aggressive towards you, stop things like name calling and making me uncomfortable every chance she gets? I chose to ask this here because this has given me anxiety and fear about interaction and even being in the same room as any family anymore, any advice you can give will help.",9.405238095238094,8.176301269841273,8.707936507936505,70.03428571428573,60.11111111111111,11.574603174603176,33.698412698412696,10.504223727775694,3.3793746031746017,272,8,47,5,3,86,53,63,0.155,0.7440000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.4228,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,4,0,0,4,3,1,1,1,0,5,0,0,3,0,10,12,5,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,10,1,6,9,2,5,0,0,0,0,13,4,0,0,2,33,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4286734113912933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983177161105358,0.0,0.16779465326867166,0.0,0.217526540745768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20505347901837426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13370775057924786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22397086874437908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487213399655072,0.0,0.1848035792582353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20677442055747,0.24681870613097745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114596201996813,0.21041110712458785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701911311831198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715854282037406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29282257450716426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568885922488637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263797966028065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435513358506527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833782292916474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14571988314917436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway-tomorin,2020/03/30,"am i going mad i dont know what to do

i had a daydream that could only be described as a nightmare. it made me want to choke, and i feel like someone has their hands wrapped around my neck as im writing this. 

this isnt suitible for some audiences i know but i vividly saw my mother take a kitchen knife and                                                                            stab me in the abdomen, and i called 999 before passing out. that is all

earlier today i saw a shadow moving in my house while i was alone and heard footsteps upstairs. noone was there. this isnt the only weird thing thats happened like this but we'd be here forever if i decided to list everything.

i have nothing to live for yet the prospect of death scares me

i need help but its out of my reach. more accurately i need a friend.

cant even cry lol

whats even happening",1.4057131901840485,3.4435643067484705,2.7892599693251547,93.21002492331293,80.77914110429448,5.7927914110429475,24.29792944785276,6.9077264865688965,0.7811720858895699,614,23,135,7,16,199,105,163,0.14,0.72,0.14,-0.4668,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,1,0,6,6,1,1,8,1,16,4,3,1,1,23,30,11,1,5,4,1,2,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,12,7,1,0,4,0,0,3,4,3,0,0,7,6,22,3,15,19,3,12,0,0,3,0,8,5,0,2,6,89,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18442338454703489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851710282997095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152163451685013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818259954094032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217175931721948,0.0,0.19559789315451134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20869282976816603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352227333731621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003485553045538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900358667242808,0.1272108760258914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375738798555724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10119940117680018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31492756463206795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935434611120878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20546504790154915,0.0,0.0,0.19234257722847672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19572158750980215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739887765240868,0.0,0.15723614603147146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849100372327566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892567068008288,0.0,0.264068382722179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17085978765921342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27085547732240944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827581662580644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508753251617112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13388398716591055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182995938403954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878639749456106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502834492520068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway_who_dis,2020/03/30,"A vent, but also, my mother increasingly believes dangerous conspiracy theories, should I be worried? I (20M) live alone with my mother (50F) who hasn't been handling the current lockdown situation particularly well, that being said, my concerns go back further than a couple of weeks.

Today she watched a 45 minute, uh, 'documentary'  on Facebook of the typical 'weird low quality dark-corner-of-YouTube conspiracy theory' breed. At dinner, she told me about it as if she was Nicholas Cage in the movie 'Next' right after Cage found out he could predict the future using his magic scroll (the movie's details are a bit fuzzy). This is not the first time this happened, but every time she seems increasingly consumed by these internet tales. She's a typical 'society's lying to me and I know better' person, going as far as a disbelief for modern medicine.

This goes hand in hand with other warning-signs: instant bursts of anger which she takes out on me (and emotionally forgets about after an hour), being absolutely furious because of the smallest things, very poor financial decisions which might very well make her go bankrupt, massive obsessions that control her whole life, and being extremely emotionally distant. (When once I told her I don't see her as a mother, she didn't even blink). All her relations seem to have fallen apart, even forcing my sister out of the house a couple of years ago. The weirdest part is that some days however, she seems to be absolutely fine.

I realise this post became mostly a vent, but if anyone could give me the slightest bit of advice, thank you. Stay safe everyone.",8.594255226480836,8.834918484320564,8.262767857142856,67.77129464285716,61.02090592334496,11.077439024390245,37.449695121951216,10.686352973137794,4.2183660278745645,1283,56,204,28,16,410,189,287,0.174,0.738,0.08800000000000001,-0.9827,2,2,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,0,3,9,12,3,1,20,0,18,4,2,3,1,32,36,14,0,5,6,4,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,14,8,1,2,6,0,1,6,4,6,3,1,7,5,29,6,31,20,9,38,0,1,2,0,26,13,0,8,17,134,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186285865376186,0.10147446704792848,0.0,0.0,0.11856074259387545,0.0,0.09154497252575952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800430189263326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802359002180107,0.0,0.06978240686967242,0.0,0.0,0.12897321730528782,0.0,0.10124312298847557,0.2499523451563484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839254383093746,0.18279665999978828,0.2533270392617643,0.0,0.07382638567617003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575361235404693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121825256693916,0.0,0.09644944666933512,0.10938499917679913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973716919395567,0.0,0.12551504639393615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981407901678586,0.19517496953620214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122915273940243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273402318007827,0.13208785163619596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06291202391119821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085650945863618,0.0,0.0,0.10108281160698404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641241418825928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143903087719796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174460525363208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121911281831402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239643979492967,0.0,0.0,0.09995445175421347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963463539063202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776033720595692,0.10889117394156013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09122111253315304,0.31263902382090314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12867379166125525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201426078382405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607034828476938,0.0,0.0,0.10539245882708093,0.0,0.0,0.07605156867020872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350164757120553,0.0,0.1085081519127881,0.21876999835359826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886895006315648,0.0,0.18890639945945525,0.0,0.0,0.0918242943950841,0.0,0.2058520985270481,0.0,0.0,0.1278063508074656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162541019133082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371762851095734
mentalhealth,Mei_mei1,2020/03/30,Book recommendation to attain mental peace My mental health is taking a toll on me because of me being stuck at home and not feeling happy at all. I am full of anxiety. Can someone suggest a book so as to practise mindfulness or any other self-help book which basically helps me to understand my thoughts and attain some mental peace.,6.831290322580646,7.896141967741936,7.3937096774193565,69.66056451612907,64.80645161290322,9.425806451612903,33.24193548387097,9.516144504307137,3.3103096774193546,270,11,43,5,4,89,47,62,0.11699999999999999,0.743,0.14,0.5472,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,10,9,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,6,1,9,6,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,0,31,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484428527164255,0.0,0.16698919076288424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306591499195825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103726201524698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232370895092267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23202919752442666,0.0,0.0,0.2926267583388799,0.0,0.21895996486448505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.659946784823851,0.0,0.22040795122400675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277212656934189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18495412506495135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641248870876489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17329573715478047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272447827066677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yrrufamisp,2020/03/30,Will I be admitted to a mental hospital if I admit to selfharming? I selfharmed for the first time in about 3 months during a panic attack a few days ago. I have an appointment with my therapist this week and I'm wondering if me admitting that I selfharmed will result in me getting hospitalized?,5.6716071428571455,7.180182946428572,7.1485714285714295,68.74642857142858,67.75,11.314285714285715,33.64285714285714,11.20814326018867,4.5004428571428585,239,11,39,8,4,82,43,56,0.13,0.8079999999999999,0.062,-0.6767,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,1,5,0,4,0,0,1,0,9,10,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,8,0,7,7,1,8,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,6,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799071244289598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35922891976894483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036426691636609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685900314086964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649744768910921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31821742437318024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520410643396291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37048285935129743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666281628643812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18412544241565154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25328809250810386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.342434289574076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prior-Bobcat,2020/03/30,"I don't think I'm allowed to feel bad. It's really simple, honestly. I don't think I am allowed to feel bad. I have all basic necessities, food, water, a roof, and a warm bed. I'm a simple man and don't need much. My main issue is that I'm terribly lonely, and have some past issues that come to haunt me, but ultimately I'm never in any grave danger nor am I going to be hurt in the future (career wise and all, I'm set). Apart from this, the people closest to me suffer so much, and at the present time I'm unable to until I can get a job and support them. I know there are people who do not even have basic necessities, and lose their loved ones, and this is why I don't think I'm allowed to feel bad. In fact, whenever I do feel bad, I feel incredibly entitled. I've had people often tell me it's ok to feel bad, but that doesn't really help. I want to be able to overcome it, because I have everything I need and honestly do not have the right to complain. Do you all have any words for me? Advice, or anything at all, I'm curious to hear your take on this state of mind.
TL;DR: I feel entitled when I feel bad in any way shape or form, since I have more than most and am incredibly grateful, but still feel overwhelmingly crappy, and then I feel worse for feeling bad and it never ends.",3.8688602941176455,3.9454731654411743,5.616911764705887,83.28985294117648,71.02205882352942,8.75294117647059,25.558823529411764,8.671277953709913,1.5213397058823523,999,26,221,16,17,345,135,272,0.22399999999999998,0.642,0.133,-0.9843,4,2,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,2,2,1,6,23,1,1,8,1,26,3,0,3,7,53,59,22,1,3,7,0,12,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,11,13,2,0,15,0,0,2,10,16,0,1,1,13,26,7,25,56,11,27,0,6,0,1,11,11,0,5,11,137,37,2,0.093536512703494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09140279766293799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908241084262048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697258012758311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5466935675927023,0.05701898996952716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057342340520772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284558714744593,0.0,0.0,0.06177998447679658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406458634874428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5202435840869456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310472244385762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048868967310383614,0.0,0.05315895571917678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542244784351502,0.0,0.06269555280008486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013277141726054,0.0,0.0,0.19525563542703628,0.09282055593753796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05140522119070473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464343200186668,0.0,0.0,0.08442035462417978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444521356806647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752019857231668,0.13871227794558372,0.14428224988006694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338276175186308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929118525250798,0.19453932168992516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984377035430258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987967077396134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737436988798213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469837987104944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10614412615810062,0.0,0.0,0.07032781679039288,0.0,0.08175503489153722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980326150465445,0.0,0.0,0.05454189275811699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517025863999982,0.0742449300177405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440215404103253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532169749270084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-athemimor-,2020/03/30,"I've been feeling worthless from 1½ year. I was in a relationship for 3 years and broke up in August, 2018. It's been 1.5 year and I haven't fully moved on. I met and went on dates with 2-3 guys but stopped talking to them after a few weeks. I don't find anyone interesting anymore. The ones I do get a lil interested in give me no damn or do something which really puts me off. Flashbacks of my past still haunt me at times and I cry for days thinking about it. 
It wasn't a normal breakup.. it was majorly fuelled due to lack of understanding and intimacy. I was 17 and I was not ready to get close to him, sexually. He would get really pissed off, used to argue with me, I was so unhappy bcs he wouldn't behave nicely.. only because I wasn't agreeing to have sex with him. Ultimately, we broke up. It took him only 3 months to move on and get in FWB with somebody I used to know..
I got proof from Reddit that they were banging and were not simple friends, as he would claim whenever he used to talk to me. 
I feel so worthless and shit. I had not value in his life.. I loved him with all my heart and soul and clearly he did not. He wanted one thing from me which I failed to deliver and he moves on.. so quickly. I'm crying while typing this and I need to get off this feeling off my chest. I am suffering everyday.. I feel terribly sick and feels like I'm still in a cage, confined in a dark place. I want to feel happy and loved and valued.. It sucks when you give so much to someone and get nothing in return. I got nothing. I got treated like trash.. I'm so angry yet weak. What did I do to deserve this shit load of sadness? I loved him, cared for him.. understood him, supported him but one thing I refuse to do, bcs I wasn't ready, and I get kicked to the curb. It's been a really log time since I've been feeling this feeling and I want this to end. I wish I could undo the past. 

That's all I have to say. I'm new on Reddit so if I made any mistakes then forgive me. Sorry if my meltdown bored you.",0.7029308922975446,2.68145747990544,2.7245258123041403,93.05023255813956,82.94799054373522,5.731574028258837,20.94832041343669,6.926510163978652,0.3511761944032106,1546,47,353,19,43,519,203,423,0.245,0.629,0.126,-0.9962,0,0,1,0,0,0,58.0,1,2,2,1,12,31,6,0,10,0,30,12,5,4,4,74,76,34,0,15,9,0,8,2,1,3,3,1,0,1,19,26,0,4,14,0,0,6,11,17,0,3,25,9,57,14,56,47,6,54,1,7,0,4,36,22,5,3,28,222,76,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057756777498183615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08422987529944538,0.059386537187591924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05177385306293252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659399192988944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781141436479303,0.0,0.1865879671923651,0.05477421338166229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522467967560535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34355399387079305,0.060675548135073525,0.0,0.0,0.07762645052452789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06561837187259566,0.0,0.310614816914868,0.16294932336956294,0.0,0.0,0.20378400792736334,0.0,0.0,0.08409618595548571,0.0,0.09041185775738443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064501199833692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04667649093779908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059990092455701714,0.08298712118609357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299637561890603,0.08036485814827424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779203541073807,0.2708083172316646,0.06243490596618392,0.06297611637997648,0.0,0.08202800404837024,0.0,0.0,0.08321547859246245,0.16298938572445698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172656677823525,0.12918946135218246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215470346104313,0.0,0.0,0.08873602455030377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538027367694594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16322913892759744,0.0,0.0,0.0911853489464962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754145817436745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436327214412825,0.07025675585551935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196273888076253,0.06538492193299546,0.0,0.0950745934492178,0.0,0.0,0.13565385656777534,0.07100708416046041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638000241919133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653049720609264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128502990414378,0.05442109518456399,0.0,0.0,0.09904924457420687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943627486932321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08841736811326982,0.0,0.22006233616804047,0.0,0.0,0.15028555569633253,0.0,0.06812745130011677,0.0,0.0,0.07873295810740305,0.0,0.0,0.09766778612930914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066673144864927,0.0,0.0,0.16408056863682954
mentalhealth,alittleloveless,2020/03/30,Any suggestions for DBT resources online? Im looking for more DBT resources online if you have any suggestions please let me know.,4.3150724637681135,7.694075000000005,3.8173913043478263,81.34898550724641,81.6086956521739,6.544927536231885,29.40579710144928,7.793537801064563,2.634257971014493,107,5,16,2,3,32,17,23,0.0,0.9009999999999999,0.099,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5429705359378185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4312292485754068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21940247013426725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4082324724998427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33524669659246137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4382268695504391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,s33kn3w,2020/03/30,"Involuntary commitment For someone who is close to me and is refusing to see a therapist or take meds for depression, how can I involuntarily commit them to a medical facility? I am in Texas.",5.1273333333333335,7.53448782857143,8.514285714285716,54.79904761904766,70.71428571428572,13.809523809523812,37.38095238095238,12.45797560212912,6.497952380952383,154,9,25,8,3,58,29,35,0.168,0.7070000000000001,0.126,-0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,1,2,7,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,6,6,0,2,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,1,0,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34433130001801737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4440672252212449,0.4027378955250632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185741695134857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33873364618511226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3005860043045576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4641772423303431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BlazingStillness,2020/03/30,"Confused and don't feel real I can't overcome feelings of shame, paranoia, anxiety, fear, inadequacy & worthlessness. My interpersonal skills are non-existant because of these ever present powers. I can attach these names to what I'm going through inside, but it falls short of describing the inner turmoil. I think about killing myself everday. And I've got absolutely no-one to talk to. I crave connection, but I'm so scared every single day. I don't trust anybody. I don't know what to do. I'm kinda desperate. I don't have a life. I'm struggling real bad. Any task I try perform, I'm not there, I'm thinking about past events. I'm spiralling down and down. I keep thinking people are watching my every move. I don't know what the hell is going on. I don't know where the hell to post this. I haven't been diagnosed anything because I don't have the means to see a pro, who I wouldn't trust anyway, but from personal research, it seems I could be Schizotypal/Quiet Borderline. Comorbid with AVP. I don't know. I can't get my shit together. It's not about me. I know. But I'm drowning here. I don't know what the fuck I'm gonna do. My life feels doomed. There's no reason why I should stay here anymore. I'm not doing anyone any favours by hanging around like a fly. If I try help others to try get myself out of self-absorbtion, I only make things worse. I'm like a thing. I'm not a human. I'm really depressed, but depression only describes this state to a point. It's more than that. It's almost beyond the physical or the psychological, and neurological. I can't quite put my finger on it. It's something more. Something out of this world. I can't be making sense. 

Am I making any sense? Can anyone understand my words?",1.3023701412806616,3.7990762103746434,3.1833541857032412,87.31379841147115,85.1671469740634,5.92138890841358,22.58445209812329,7.3138001815848295,1.0540022351866174,1363,49,270,22,41,455,178,347,0.239,0.711,0.05,-0.9969,1,0,2,0,0,1,59.0,0,0,0,4,13,21,5,6,13,0,31,7,2,4,1,50,71,12,2,4,11,0,4,2,0,3,4,0,0,2,21,8,0,1,16,0,0,6,20,16,0,0,2,6,34,5,29,63,3,27,3,4,2,1,6,13,4,6,7,155,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569705438688183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436768312134064,0.0,0.21534095896716945,0.0,0.08074849864889473,0.0,0.10468117570697276,0.14761158108954048,0.0,0.08686192408052586,0.09396541263794456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813315651744152,0.12868944160822035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427625657550959,0.0,0.0,0.06807357882025457,0.0,0.18182696053724748,0.10713505833677743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547960955019794,0.17786754559038948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11877756275479776,0.16011377733865145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975829450107148,0.11029518619155912,0.0,0.11997750804833665,0.0,0.0844211528838071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075060155812618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382121904380038,0.1167798294249012,0.0,0.348058210833669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911178217247587,0.103136676665061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21137428518742,0.0,0.0,0.1149792182668566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218716612625357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16055710227777134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076320868558436,0.07317783277845398,0.09216565578290377,0.0,0.0,0.09978262034192947,0.0,0.1010915260897442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611089472602664,0.0,0.11226964070298556,0.0,0.2402870546558495,0.06762057647531705,0.1085270618381094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10567793868008528,0.0,0.08411284850561647,0.09609237056839663,0.11011581187479268,0.0,0.10834963404179697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625212070449228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112506488331905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034792836875433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848402833114811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402507357460015,0.20290416696908287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149926520216803,0.0,0.0,0.10988540602854524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952460406601056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756851384108353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nguyenphuc2002,2020/03/30,"A 18 year old Vietnamese boy with his dark future I feel so lucky because I was nurtured by my grandmother, she is a first person who showed me how good food should taste like and also the only person in this world who ever taught me what love is and how important is this. She is the only person in my family has enough abilities to gather other members together but after she died, my life in the last 4 years was an absolute mess. Her death  makes me feel empty, it affects my study performance and my personality. Then I dropout after finished middle school. 3 years later, when I decided to stop living a dissolute life, with a help of my mother (who is more like a father to me), again I came Singapore to find my reasons to continue living. Unfortunately, I am still not ready to deal with my depression, I isolated myself In my room,  I started blaming people around me, blaming my father why he ran away instead of be with me. I try to think about positive things and it helped but I afraid not for so long. I keep thinking about suicide even I found it meaningless. I feel disgusted about nature of people who I know and even myself.",7.094178082191782,6.795443680365295,7.5302397260274025,73.57974315068496,64.25114155251143,10.587671232876714,32.40525114155251,10.125756701596842,3.1689114155251144,902,31,163,18,12,297,134,219,0.218,0.6829999999999999,0.099,-0.9894,1,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,0,3,16,10,1,1,9,0,11,5,0,5,1,34,25,14,3,1,4,3,3,2,0,1,2,0,1,5,12,11,2,2,10,1,0,2,2,4,0,1,6,4,37,6,27,17,2,31,0,1,0,1,23,9,0,1,22,121,49,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321304068349876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489499831697987,0.0,0.0,0.12126058909331865,0.0,0.0,0.07867667880074232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761570039543814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330600987227321,0.11116328731191316,0.0,0.1339488425487764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333583966387518,0.0,0.17049211140335738,0.1167464630932296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167076777473365,0.0,0.19577705946688911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796285099616398,0.10978241758443516,0.15606561819699472,0.1415128458988096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825339593178207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730187740092711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471868745651093,0.0,0.0,0.07093061589592599,0.10520500416106776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18232451154937254,0.12610904330840905,0.0,0.2279330925323804,0.11421824977596087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648598350411,0.0,0.08615172845366179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543175293889614,0.0,0.0,0.19631912932753365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895450544800834,0.4507774751912891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270006736713996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062042596575985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135270030662368,0.0,0.10307128279878802,0.1079039171815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14117589766014274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574489056723901,0.16539897158575695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876264989380399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164608697405195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493404186161569
mentalhealth,SleepingCoconut,2020/03/30,"I feel like a waste of life I am a 24M who has been experiencing constant emotional abuse from my father and older brother. 

Despite my age, I always feel as if I am not emotionally developed as others and am closer to a 12-year-old. I believe this is due to my narcissistic father constantly trying to find fault and berating me to undermine what little confidence I would have had. Normally I would stay clear of him throughout the day and literally stay in the corner on my PC to avoid contact with him. It always feels like I am walking barefoot on a path of shattered glass with him. It feels like he is intentionally trying to push my buttons and create drama in the household so he can maintain some kind of supremacy. 

I am constantly feeling like I am not worth anything but as he can 'never be wrong' nor be his fault, any form of confrontation is deemed to be insubordinate. Now, I know not everything in my life is his fault but it feels as if he set me up on a slimy tight rope with false rest stops and constantly nudges me in varying degrees of strength with a pike but never providing genuine support. I didn't stop walking just his rope but stopped moving altogether and live like a shut-in. I have no job, no friends (either online or off) and have never felt genuinely connected with someone. 

Essentially, I am not living my life, and I am self-aware of my patheticness but only idealising a better future but not actively trying to achieve it. I hate living like this but whether it is due to lack of confidence, an expectation of failure or some kind of comfort in living as a recluse, I can't seem to see things through. I don't know what to expect from posting this but I feel ashamed of living in the negative space of my own head and hopefully, this will be the start of a more social lifestyle even if it is online.

Sorry for the long and pathetic post.",8.05105279312462,6.978329986187844,8.290902394106816,71.44100675260897,62.67403314917129,11.359361571516269,37.79066912216084,10.504223727775694,3.891058440761204,1493,64,276,30,18,492,186,362,0.168,0.703,0.129,-0.9495,1,1,0,0,1,0,29.0,0,0,0,3,5,22,2,2,17,0,32,4,1,1,4,68,48,32,0,10,21,3,9,6,1,3,3,0,0,0,15,16,0,5,12,1,1,4,15,8,0,0,4,11,37,14,49,37,8,43,0,0,1,0,17,15,0,9,25,199,52,3,0.0,0.10052460991868332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14119168308587834,0.0,0.0,0.057695878802009125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981823246672819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558855897445194,0.0,0.07503638689289957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3667388479163399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054716459498509264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908730157116937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056037738514707114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625106008123446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002927819825384,0.2424462875586691,0.08146220310879182,0.0,0.07754460126232235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554918391812124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376450455153996,0.08707298684169475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426784745977309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419319115191856,0.0,0.0,0.17670102830303486,0.09325455057235583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17978051686251048,0.2486988589121551,0.08503457625140905,0.3745878601960509,0.0750830330138871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017425905883532,0.0,0.0,0.1963075353506157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312773626390238,0.0,0.0,0.0890280388377996,0.0,0.0,0.06452662204800788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16251152029298566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760856926171224,0.07723751848282441,0.08850933747000002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648634835595215,0.07188686143120918,0.0,0.0,0.09497434688022324,0.0600520304459573,0.1808618503336435,0.0,0.2127966430572495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627837942810932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05636565489193063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172807672825352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053950055151187,0.0927620665770628,0.0,0.05463585407578633
mentalhealth,FusionKnight11,2020/03/30,"Lost my job, pretty down on myself. I will start out by saying , I’ve always viewed myself as a happy go lucky guy. Not the best life but I’ve always tried to make the most of it. 
I had back surgery 9 years ago. I’ve been a stay at home dad for the past 7 years. Then as my kids got older. I explored working. I started out part time. It was a job that didn’t rely so much of my physical needs. Long story short. I found a challenging full time job. Unfortunately it was too physically demanding and didn’t not actually give me my position it hired me for. They let me go 10 days ago. Now I’m super down, I’ve felt like crying but have not actually down so. I’m in my 40’s married with two kids. I do feel like if I found another job I’d get out of this funk, but I’ve also feel I keep making some bad decisions. 

Anyways I’m not even sure this is where I need to be sharing this.",0.08892670157068494,2.0037678795811544,2.7146047120418864,92.60981282722513,84.86387434554973,5.914240837696338,18.450523560209426,7.1686216300943375,0.13285947643979013,679,17,161,10,20,236,120,191,0.107,0.77,0.12300000000000001,0.4893,4,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,5,9,11,0,0,7,0,12,1,0,2,1,29,33,11,0,3,8,1,3,2,0,1,1,1,1,3,8,5,0,1,7,0,0,3,6,2,0,1,11,5,20,9,20,19,6,31,0,1,1,0,8,12,0,4,17,93,28,7,0.0,0.0,0.2371977863526572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215463736602276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09719007362825813,0.20225075285424865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743817981743508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345154582721826,0.10147516382327736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754161835855346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349853747413154,0.07837887391965895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027154684426738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12290169729397298,0.08682335799417007,0.11669095195853453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665098096358772,0.0,0.0,0.06349609233326621,0.1165857406539456,0.13814026145658542,0.0,0.09720121980810856,0.0,0.0,0.12033699708658732,0.0,0.12937437459176004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190773075831395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4824118793263485,0.10802431172069872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427595349944948,0.0858425087778309,0.11874998666029025,0.0,0.0,0.10755307693586023,0.0,0.0,0.1326678682184606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622487386509434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893409018731358,0.18023068816350915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13160863596943745,0.1160172120546396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364297863335826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664809602488916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17204367994867958,0.1295382440137879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145436233347864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14173399804438452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251308000594687,0.0,0.11872029830840675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847763298193137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565268205343444
mentalhealth,throwaway9054231,2020/03/30,"This year, I learned that the feeling of uncertainty really really sucks Everything's been hectic since the outbreak of this pandemic and I was all for distance learning. Online exams haven't been fun though and I was just done with my college anatomy's midterm yesterday. After solving the final question on the test, I clicked to go back to those I skipped and didn't complete but I couldn't. The navigation between questions was disabled for the first time by this professor, and he didn't inform us and there was no way of knowing (there's no alert or anything, professors who disable this feature let students know prior to taking an exam). 

​

I got 64% when I usually get an A+ and it's really upsetting me. The grades I lost were because of the questions I skipped/didn't get to complete. I want to focus on other things I got coming up, but this has been on my mind all day and it really fucked with my motivation. I emailed my professor letting him know I didn't know navigation was disabled and missed a lot of questions, but he never got back to me. I don't know how to approach or fix this.  The lack of communication on his end isn't helping either and I have been feeling sick all day because I don't know how to talk to him in the middle of a class with the rest of the students listening and I'm scared of his reaction. Grades aren't the biggest deal to everyone, but I always prioritized them. I am feeling low about my grade, but I'm most upset about not being given a fair chance.",5.224591836734696,6.285845166666667,5.956605442176876,78.53898979591841,68.42176870748298,8.737142857142857,33.067346938775515,8.982922981607832,2.878044081632654,1205,54,222,21,20,394,155,294,0.16899999999999998,0.7759999999999999,0.055,-0.9893,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,0,1,3,11,9,2,3,19,0,26,2,0,3,4,53,52,21,0,3,10,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,13,14,0,0,17,0,0,3,13,8,0,1,19,5,32,1,35,29,8,28,0,3,1,1,19,9,2,8,15,164,45,17,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900740962927446,0.1159016904514142,0.12997996702881626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08802699820467726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450628544115006,0.0,0.13041554588297982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214497663556008,0.22431151670429084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13797329184284005,0.11028112570763833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946720376016596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947434572026297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221418992966387,0.09613752298977536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622613744690634,0.0,0.0,0.1171801436243642,0.0,0.09098842335406428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988918195883154,0.11177456934833926,0.0,0.06079337982302638,0.0,0.25666046724167896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169957541538381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3527266961272345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21876765439119197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11677012940142505,0.09094186482070092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108008964119644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250167351872452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4793224502749741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27411026992557674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709539095452122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884864910066423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042794709603779,0.08597824128119225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106595550584767,0.0,0.10509724625072056,0.0,0.062374927382458485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286714506438996,0.0,0.11781207825206165,0.0,0.06309353603848505,0.08490761658950828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997996702881626,0.06888501840736487
mentalhealth,throwaway44757575747,2020/03/30,"I need help. Is there any psychologist out there who is willing to help me? 
I want to have a free therapy session in a call (could be in discord) or a video call (discord too) 
It can be other app
Im 24. Female. 
And i have been dealing with a lot and i really need someone to listen",-0.8024999999999984,1.3236914166666691,2.2816666666666663,92.0625,93.16666666666666,5.0,20.833333333333336,6.6274283507984215,0.4598333333333336,215,8,48,3,8,76,41,60,0.0,0.825,0.175,0.8402,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,10,0,0,0,0,10,14,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,2,7,9,1,3,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,2,0,36,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556464223138832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5272414384774973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20612795965865172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26616222063461703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3460921910012017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788682027288565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21948713829327915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3828599800853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653904910609118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21874683894871425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952402129170392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15227551906037798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fwimmygoat,2020/03/30,"Counseling over the phone I have been diagnosed with generalized anxiety, depression, and am mildly bipolar.
I have been given trazodone for my nightmares and trileptal as a mood stabilizer.
I also go to counseling every three months. 

I have a counseling session in a few days, and have been instructed to do so over the phone because of the COVID-19 outbreak. 

Why isn't this available for people with social anxiety already.",6.977442922374427,9.636247589041098,6.935821917808219,67.00638127853883,66.26027397260273,10.346118721461188,39.56392694063927,10.504223727775694,5.213239269406394,346,20,48,10,6,110,51,73,0.10300000000000001,0.897,0.0,-0.7269,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,6,0,10,2,0,0,0,6,12,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,4,0,5,0,11,8,1,6,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,40,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363895074266404,0.2437739064184079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4663910351951441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858226558221107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19659131393553994,0.0,0.26255121076642524,0.3093978934558538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568339662766495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17324295533376885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24331386053685375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21133201083576708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107376649844584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27506331538656703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Avedea,2020/03/30,"Where does the line get drawn between not doing out of depression, and not doing out of laziness? I have been officially diagnosed as of a few years ago with what she called “extreme” depression. But I know I’m a pretty lazy person, too. 

I’m trying to motivate myself, especially with not being able to leave the house for anything other than groceries and essentials otherwise, to actually do more of my hobbies and the things I genuinely enjoy. But I can’t find the motivation or even the actual want to do anything other than sit on the couch until I’m sore and just play games. 

How do I draw the line from just me being lazy, or me being in a depressive spell?",8.665416666666665,7.066677625000002,9.139375,67.53479166666668,61.8125,12.595833333333333,36.17708333333333,11.538034831475384,4.155448958333333,528,19,95,13,6,178,83,128,0.139,0.7509999999999999,0.11,-0.6072,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,6,5,0,0,10,0,11,2,0,3,0,23,17,11,0,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,4,8,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,10,2,21,13,2,9,0,3,0,0,4,5,0,2,3,75,14,2,0.19771800184378568,0.0,0.3858884972697645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752650790129291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3254101377037531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201892186080353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5108826758070794,0.20067960994019984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17302435581159886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305908754949342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807106717216028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329949545379404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281400280006549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086606430408893,0.0,0.0,0.2093548157268074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263973287114556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011502887798756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135505491983204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423754470142846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166192001842522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732391074807273
mentalhealth,fuchsiashock,2020/03/30,"Cold shock therapy? I take a low dose of 50mg sertraline for anxiety and depression.

There seems to be anecdotal evidence for cold showers to ""shock"" the body into kind of realising what real stress is and resetting the system.
What do people think?
I'd like to try it but don't want to stop meds to test it.

I think it might work for me since I only worry and get depressed when there's nothing to worry about. In this pandemic, I don't get anxious because there is an actual threat.

Make sense to anyone?",3.0126555555555536,5.114543310000002,4.5553333333333335,82.19322222222225,75.9,8.444444444444445,25.11111111111111,9.150863307647796,2.2156777777777776,401,14,77,10,9,134,70,100,0.249,0.695,0.055999999999999994,-0.9656,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,1,1,4,0,7,2,1,1,0,13,15,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,6,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,0,2,5,2,15,13,0,6,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,2,3,45,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.1816061277257457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14236549908043072,0.21023930285352108,0.0,0.13012499776150047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134444409957275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067144330408613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.320574207772188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194458466610082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937938430537247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09091874581323503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422276618963175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067144330408613,0.0,0.0,0.19742200922728484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785673526101355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153694730642247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290178623682869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21182181112363624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941786562837516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539433115884703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558739581403186,0.21317618520614265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13992355645899596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21282083397514245,0.0,0.0,0.2384899077951086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263492478325719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976622269790068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548254866340811,0.3779858619564835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PutMeToSleepPlease,2020/03/30,"My dad's cheating on my mum and I don't know what to do This started off as simple suspicion. I'm pretty sure this has been going on for years. But only recently I've confirmed it for myself. Im 19 and im really destroyed by this. I honestly don't know how to go about it but I'll explain the story.  

I started having suspicions around when I was  15. I used to play on my dad's computer before I got my own. 

one time I went to go on and I opened up Google to find that Facebook was open and signed in. I thought that was weird because dad never uses Facebook or had an account. 

I was curious on what I was seeing and I looked around on the account. The name was completely different to my dad's and he was friends with all these girls. I didn't check the messages. I only noticed that the name was different and he was only friends to girls all over the world. But I thought nothing of it and simply closed the tab and started playing games. 

I never forgot about it because I never thought my dad would do something like that. I'd always thought about it from time to time. But it started to blow up big within the past 2 years. 

I'm 19 now but early last year dad downloaded Snapchat. My sisters and I thought it was funny and we used to send stupid photos of ourselves and send it to eachother. That would go on for about a few weeks before it got old and we moved on from it.

About six months later I saw a Snapchat notification on his phone from someone called Rose. I immediately thought it was suspicious and I wanted to find out but dad changed his passcode for some reason. It had always been the same for so long until I noticed that night. 

I normally stay up late. I'm always the last to go to bed. Most of the time I grab a bite before going to bed and dad leaves his phone to charge in the kitchen. 

One night it was like 1am I was eating some food and I heard the Snapchat notification. I checked the phone to see a notification from a different girl called Nikki. At this time I knew that something was happening and I wanted to find out for sure. 

There would be nights where I'd just casually check his phone for notifications. Some days thered be some and some days there wouldn't. I don't remember seeing the same name twice though. 

One day dads phone broke and got my sister a new phone while he took hers as a replacement. One night I was once again, eating. Decided to check his phone again. I realised that it's a new phone so I checked if it had a password. To my surprise it didn't have one. 

I immediately looked for Snapchat. It was already installed and it was signed in. When I opened the app my heart just sank. I saw lists of just girls. Majority of them were pending or left him on read. I was only able to read the messages of the pending ones and it really disgusted me. 

There was one girl at the top of the list with the yellow heart emoji meaning they're best friends (they snap/message a lot) it was an incoming message and I was able to half swipe it or whatever you call it. Just able to read some of it without actually opening it.

I was really shocked with what I was seeing but at the same time I expected it. Just wasn't expecting it to be that bad. Just the way he spoke to them was disgusting. 

That's when I remembered about the Facebook account on the computer. Made me wonder how many years this has been going on for. 

I freaked out and started shaking. I had so many uncontrollable emotions going on. I was angry and upset. I felt like I've been lied to for so many years. The man that raised me and that I looked up to is the kind of person I hate.

I've had a really tough past 6 months and this topped it off. I really don't know what to do. I want to say something but im so scared. The moment I say something, the family will fall apart. 

I have a really serious decision I have to make and I don't know what to do. I've already gone through so much I really can't go through anything more. I have really bad anxiety and this is the last thing I want.

I just want some help.",1.1883515151515134,3.4859767381818187,2.731424242424243,91.80646969696971,83.43636363636364,5.945454545454545,22.13636363636364,7.257412932260183,0.7389999999999994,3159,107,682,47,90,1031,295,825,0.1,0.8220000000000001,0.077,-0.9739,3,0,4,0,0,0,68.0,2,1,3,3,35,33,6,4,44,0,65,6,2,8,7,130,127,56,0,13,20,12,2,3,3,5,0,4,3,7,53,43,4,1,23,7,8,17,14,18,0,10,58,16,85,15,102,61,20,114,0,1,10,0,65,44,0,14,54,449,138,5,0.1497713669229157,0.0,0.04871841644578352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018428513360293,0.0,0.1246217752139171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03819156191792402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04108302454335263,0.08888551329008422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833685569509726,0.060866156765760376,0.0,0.12744440206898938,0.0,0.05239193647552005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529333110709894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052812749076630514,0.0,0.05234414289972562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659014138923636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15647920122394782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216899921659008,0.0,0.056157543037802994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04706370514153865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04793466651091382,0.0,0.13688831603045765,0.0,0.0603680437946623,0.0,0.1157129865607055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553555579143945,0.0,0.11978584400300478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04414744171413309,0.0,0.0,0.04928940585817088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831986061644748,0.03346286340117028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16177877717234918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051987943737108314,0.1097472352016118,0.12208365376023482,0.056316208490203176,0.05286208409772169,0.054242342795617716,0.0,0.0,0.07317072463457812,0.0,0.0,0.044180982232239416,0.12577022733260645,0.0,0.0,0.04244342009436595,0.0,0.04723909623420537,0.0333245168049234,0.15184465851426385,0.0,0.05438164185326634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969738411712192,0.05306108687094319,0.036699729200896494,0.0,0.11551291128284767,0.09643341297240776,0.0,0.18740037608868748,0.0489147133707621,0.04790322197288032,0.11367712927978378,0.0523866184432966,0.05316720592142381,0.2368075601276221,0.15187716466819776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531581114088908,0.0,0.04359152688205457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05079044131298304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981189718184648,0.0,0.25585966070893745,0.05132996986089794,0.04929371876134801,0.0,0.11310784169371307,0.0,0.0,0.07940280157306581,0.04998242203868268,0.0,0.15913118463109335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042300264389110144,0.15373508723228446,0.0,0.0,0.17668157396172454,0.05321211647512111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410516056901773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0331671470547591,0.0,0.04904986919033336,0.2378034714255335,0.1746657769643601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05546716648487546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935437348232726,0.0,0.0,0.1472317210890793,0.03962717992670342,0.040045852158658544,0.0,0.0,0.04627985254421978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048124751036666163,0.05414021953637624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063932819115944,0.0,0.0,0.16074641641867884
mentalhealth,Alma_Karma_538,2020/03/30,"Coping in quarantine? I’m 20/f and I have been doing somewhat ok with the quarantine so far, but the one in our city got extended another 11 days, and somehow I feel like the news managed to shatter the resolve I have had to powering through. 

I’m diagnosed with GAD and depression, and I have been doing fine for the most part! 
The beginning of the quarantine was a little hard, but I managed to apply everything I have learned in therapy and kept myself distracted, but it feels like I ran out of things, art is tiring now, journaling is somehow pushing all the negative thoughts to the surface. 

I know I will be fine once I can go back to my routine, but until then, I’m not exactly sure what to do and there is still 9 days to go. 

Anyone knows any good tips/ideas? 

For reference, I meditate, do basic exercises, journal, and do art. All to distract myself.",5.957425149700597,6.193367407185633,6.962520958083832,74.8892904191617,66.54491017964071,10.991377245508986,36.46047904191617,10.793553405168565,4.098617245508981,675,33,126,18,10,227,103,167,0.115,0.773,0.111,-0.3923,1,3,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,0,2,8,11,0,2,10,1,19,3,0,0,4,33,33,14,0,0,5,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,10,0,1,8,3,0,4,2,3,0,1,8,3,15,8,20,23,5,19,0,1,0,0,1,7,0,4,10,94,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13382579692606736,0.20635432407629373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13760204447104002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.151321453277867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538300464228617,0.0,0.16949728012670967,0.19974046687735544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17686460616790708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19900862292021945,0.28117751491095705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22368367408756915,0.16506039555516538,0.15739311438399356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17628762179448534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22215502555457747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21630426308530706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922859638018823,0.1972380032925156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20957782263966232,0.13335183912726176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131073368827316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15715891924413455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18547480829026772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22504962432111314,0.0,0.13074033781611502,0.0,0.0,0.15623143657129826,0.0,0.22618428059857326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CREST_BD,2020/03/30,"[Crosspost] World Bipolar Day AMA on r/IAmA! We are bipolar disorder experts and scientists, ask us anything! Join us here! - [https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/frv7op/we\_are\_bipolar\_disorder\_experts\_and\_scientists/](https://www.reddit.com/r/IAmA/comments/frv7op/we_are_bipolar_disorder_experts_and_scientists/)",43.07045454545455,55.24920695454547,20.45327272727273,-43.7400909090909,24.90909090909091,7.2145454545454575,40.763636363636365,7.554174236665415,5.283407272727274,291,8,13,3,5,64,20,22,0.14400000000000002,0.767,0.08900000000000001,-0.3348,0,0,0,0,0,0,40.0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732708077320797,0.0,0.3104468629028719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141619825526635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38058863789431296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7988947020040165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Arex189,2020/03/30,"I daydream way too much I literally day dream everytime, like always thinking of situations and scenarios that are impossible like having a relationship with my crush, or me becoming suddenly rich and helping my family and making their dreams come true.

I want to do so much but I can only execute those thoughts in my head, I know one thing that may be the reason is that I used have imaginary friends when I was like 7-8, my mom told me that, it was because I was lonely, no friends in my neighborhood or in school.

I still struggle with talking to strangers let alone to women, I can't even talk straight on a phone. I can only do these things in my imaginations.

Sometimes I can't sleep because I am thinking of scenarios and with this pandemic it's turning worse because I have too much free time on my hands.

How do I stop thinking so much.",6.098231707317072,6.52399431097561,6.563317073170732,77.21704878048784,66.2560975609756,10.218536585365854,35.302439024390246,10.125756701596842,3.5164092682926817,673,31,129,15,10,219,103,164,0.125,0.705,0.171,0.7228,0,3,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,0,8,10,0,1,3,0,19,3,3,4,1,25,30,11,0,1,3,1,1,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,11,8,0,1,7,2,2,1,3,2,0,1,5,1,25,9,14,22,4,15,0,1,0,0,11,7,0,3,9,93,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14332966056057933,0.0,0.0,0.11515104944556374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530826428101436,0.1528401963717394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11921019615014032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924970076837628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914048796287776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304611901541795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138385818060093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202742816065694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927594836010968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605518348732823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14151251616474833,0.0,0.2028301807425168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923759850740287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207996807082706,0.0,0.0,0.4069284673177368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377622473577124,0.21050271754281605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422873303003185,0.0,0.1485784022351537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14005743977459853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15555546025066072,0.13848932212505688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13687063440920194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11051793681078652,0.11569971748563107,0.0,0.14467462645567886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224642814401582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838795082439656,0.2660229783784941,0.0,0.10986570865903657,0.08069595977567462,0.0,0.0,0.13223698215297575,0.0,0.0,0.15052790480948494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11952399034033305,0.0,0.0,0.08162564126204506,0.1098470475315094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410306001064708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mertda1,2020/03/30,i get a lot of deja vu not like the normal deja vu. more like a mini one but i feel it everyday more then once. there is nothing bad about it. its just little annoying. its been around a month maybe since i start to have it around everyday. im not really worried but really what is this ?,0.3612142857142828,2.6007928833333342,2.8961904761904758,89.56500000000004,86.83333333333334,6.761904761904763,16.9047619047619,7.957251820313856,0.6354761904761905,223,5,48,5,7,77,42,60,0.10300000000000001,0.7909999999999999,0.106,0.2986,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,10,7,3,0,1,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,1,3,2,5,6,3,8,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,7,34,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4290102673563001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011912041837509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12183641564680678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589144768211788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602777208504061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354413820370467,0.241504825246963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20485523825209195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420763090689605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19233165676896893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360892510387116,0.2312072384477772,0.0,0.0,0.2566141138488764,0.16328046353738632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3087297844818731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19932427417225235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17055244769724956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447061739949345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leeoliveira,2020/03/30,"lonesome. For one of the first times I couldn't find the exact content I was searching for on Google. I typed in the question, or more like a statement, over and over. Re-wording it so that maybe something would come up. 

""Already lonely before coronavirus.""

""My life barely changed after coronavirus.""

""I already socially isolated before coronavirus."" 

And it went on...

Articles about the dangers of social isolation came up. How to handle this time of social isolation, and the many ways in which socially isolating can stunt your human experience. One article stated how prolonged loneliness is the equivalent of smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Yea that sucks. It sucked even more to not be able to find any such article or blog post. 

I knew I was lonely. I've felt lonely since I was a kid. It definitely has gotten worse into adulthood, which turned out to be much more difficult to make friends than when I was younger. I didn't have friends, but I had no idea I had isolated myself for so long. But when I couldn't find any articles or acknowledgments about how someone else's life had barely been effected by this social distancing and isolation, I was..idk, pretty surprised. This is the loneliest I've ever felt. For years I've been using the internet to reference what is normal. what people are doing. what are people talking about. whats going on in the world. I don't even have fucking social media at all. This is the only online community I'm a part of and I just joined it to make this post! I do not exist online anymore in any social media account.

Fuck man..I don't know what to say. This all just happened..I'm still a little shaken up about it. I'm lucky to have a husband and family around..so it's not so obvious. But when this pandemic began and I saw all of these people becoming frustrated and lonesome over what has been my normal for the past 10 years, I started to really recognize how alone I really am. This sounds so depressing, which it is..I'll give myself that. But, idk..YEAAAAAAAAAA not much to say really. Guess it is what it is? Hahaha fuck what a bummer.",3.0209584239787297,5.713733926395937,4.2112110224800565,81.57881556683589,79.0253807106599,7.610248972685523,25.11699299008944,8.563005593585519,2.1855510756586902,1653,62,291,38,42,539,194,394,0.166,0.777,0.057,-0.9901,0,10,2,0,0,0,65.0,0,1,0,2,22,17,7,0,18,1,35,5,0,8,6,58,60,26,0,5,13,1,2,1,2,1,2,3,0,2,33,12,0,0,13,1,1,4,10,12,0,3,19,6,24,5,45,36,9,42,0,4,1,3,18,18,5,6,17,205,57,1,0.08164949189517179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456424940502942,0.18020448929911395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657336310729046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097435608705578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268535848423067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017544892343254,0.1389554076671091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338526705524608,0.0,0.0,0.08637433608882236,0.07033380752759245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05265716757845305,0.0,0.07032458772713898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820767344445185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785743868412603,0.07385663994081215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798688703826103,0.07697187434007842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15679263313908307,0.0,0.22387846916076565,0.06945101609537085,0.0,0.0,0.12616438979577574,0.22645091872410655,0.0,0.07832563260816483,0.046403287857305235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899461205676421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921723379393378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04487242542690149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534290157581115,0.039889817464841014,0.08183424097012679,0.0,0.07225723096755725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090033397174448,0.08277976938720559,0.08202788904631761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004354250779498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999833245734818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11065561762725486,0.0620981178532947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08841844303757057,0.07794367884652383,0.16981643115095973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563952864627519,0.08306688677958701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146611728664726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15692026578832893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298619062513613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754130343825435,0.0,0.0,0.5826196223690864,0.06918134952016305,0.06285776789416166,0.0,0.0,0.057791930611031064,0.0,0.06520538969843256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562676875755576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522095066379037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881120094012704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705189455517636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480956619536933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07568989699807947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320780775242187,0.058001456403963085,0.0,0.0,0.10515919159349008
mentalhealth,tampooker,2020/03/30,"I feel lost Before the quarantine I was pushing away all these events and feelings, but now with it everything is coming out. 
This is day 4 of me feeling sad and crying. I hold the tears back, but that doesn’t change how I feel. 
My mom and I haven’t had the best relationship for a long time and when I try talking to her she just says I want nothing to do with her and everyone can tell. I shut her out but it’s hard for me to talk to her when I get negativity back, so I hold it all in. 
I have a hard time with decisions because for a long time I didn’t think my voice counted and now that I’m using it, I sometimes wonder why I even try",4.098291366906473,3.5199708705036024,5.363228417266188,87.55764838129498,70.51079136690647,8.676618705035972,27.44694244604317,8.07648339933343,1.3486611510791358,497,14,120,6,8,167,82,139,0.14800000000000002,0.785,0.067,-0.8735,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,11,3,0,0,6,0,10,0,0,2,2,30,22,13,0,1,4,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,8,12,0,2,7,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,4,8,23,1,15,18,3,20,0,2,0,0,11,5,0,1,13,85,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895311586636775,0.24381423914235995,0.0,0.09664423157609156,0.0,0.13490547085722582,0.0,0.16637746526189054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16771381086453369,0.13656777495730776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741482393509706,0.1022448871251884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471387040938117,0.0,0.0,0.1514913237535165,0.1424851151305611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32064941836742883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283036574574959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840405735405743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28060500645992403,0.0,0.0,0.17306463505765685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18567959217772226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15212296368257905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702121333179514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260770048707043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15679965809902605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548561524510413,0.13857054516033707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158573516343236,0.0,0.0,0.2773370407191127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21527588059525893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692725909317124,0.0,0.0,0.093510727828861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430572748661781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719293674016685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rashard034,2020/03/30,"Help, don’t know what to do Hi. A couple of days ago my mom attempted suicide. She is a realtor and because of this coronavirus, she’s having to take money out of retirement just to pay rent. I’m 17 and am trying everything I can to get a job and help out, but nobody’s getting back to me. Could use some encouragement and prayers.",3.3788235294117652,4.50544394117647,5.158117647058828,82.30452941176472,72.82352941176471,8.969411764705884,28.30588235294117,9.3871,2.4168611764705883,260,10,54,6,5,89,51,68,0.06,0.8290000000000001,0.11199999999999999,0.5346,2,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,1,0,12,13,5,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,10,12,1,5,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,1,3,35,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24260846475660666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104496693485228,0.0,0.16683805384930786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21851810773363103,0.302831273051204,0.0,0.17650653024829452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459737008945108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28598203524991195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668954507879868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27159374303378364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15041211823874576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32054082580266463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993709492453187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20577979531118526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185816620265281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23637910978720106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jaggy1202,2020/03/30,"I do not know what is wrong with me I have never used reddit, but I decided to create an account because this seems to be the only place where I could find some answers.This might be long,sorry in advance.

English is my second language,I'm sorry for any mistakes.

Ever since I was a kid,I always had ""low mood"", I was never hyper like kids usually are.I was actually an incredibly shy kid,very anxious and very scared of everything. My parents were very strict,my mom more than my father.She was,well I don't know if she was abusive,since this type of parenting was pretty normal in the country that I'm from. So,when I was a little kid,I would get screamed at constantly and I would get hit a lot.Every mistake,no matter how big or small,I would get beaten for.Depending on what I did,the beatings would be harsher or lighter.There was this one girl,that was truly amazing to play with,she was just a perfect kid and we would play pretty innocent games,but certain games that my mom didn't like but she would see me play,she would tell me to come to her and she would pull my hair or just scare me into playing something else. One thing that comes to my mind is playing doctor,which was truly innocent but she didn't like it. My mom was very protective in a strange way when it came to anything that could be seen even a tiny ity bity thing sexual or intimate. There was nothing that I did or that others did to me that could be seen that way,but she would just be very strange about certain things. (And no,she was never abused as a kid or a grown up,it's not that.) Also,since I was a kid I was always a bit of tomboy and was never really into revealing clothing or any provocative behavior since I was shy as hell and scared of everything that moves. So even though that was the case,she treated me like I would jump on any boy or any type of guy that came close to me.I still don't understand that part,to be quite honest but it's good that she's not like that anymore. Things got worse when I was six,when she gave birth to my brother.She was always angry and she would always make me a victim of her frustrations.I would get hit so often that I remember a few times,raising my hands in front of my face to shield it just because my friend moved her hand too suddenly. It would just be my instinct and afterwards I would just pray that she didn't understand what I did.She also put  a lot of pressure on me when I started school,if I got a lower grade I would get beaten very very badly,if I couldn't draw something I would get screamed at and sometimes hit,learning math with her was a nightmare because of her temper. I had to be as perfect as I can be and not embarrass her otherwise I would get hell for it.There are so many examples,but I hope that you can get a picture of what my mom was like.Honestly I was a really good kid and people would always praise me for being good and obedient and quiet and sweet but I would always feel bad because my mom thought otherwise.I was a nightmare to her for some reason and never good enough.I am talking about this,since it might be a part of the problem that I have,I'm so sorry if this turns out to be super long,I truly have no one else to talk to.I am now nearly 20 and now I have an okay relationship with  my mom,my dad was always a distant type of guy,but he's okay too I suppose.We were never a lovely dovey type of family,we are all pretty distant from each other,we don't fight or anything,we just kind of  mind our own business.I thought all families are like that and only pretend to be lovely to each other in front of other people.But when I slept over for the first time at my friend's house I was so shocked to see them talking and interacting with each other.I couldn't believe my eyes and ears.I knew they weren't faking it because it was natural and you could see that this is a normal thing in their life.My mom told me that she realizes that she was too harsh to me in my earlier years,she confessed that she unleashed all the anger she had from her own problems on me.I understand very well those problems  and since she was pretty young and kind of immature,I can understand to some extent why she did certain things. She says she's sorry for hurting me,but that doesn't really mean anything today. I don't resent her or anything,it just doesn't mean anything. Since I spoke about my mom,I'll say a few things about my dad. My dad is a silent guy,distant,kind of short tempered but if you don't ask stupid questions or do something stupid he doesn't care.When I was little there were times when he would get very angry and hit me.His punishments were in one aspect worse,because he would do it in front of other people and embarrass me.He would humiliate me over trivial things in front of other relatives and even worse among my peers. There were quite a few of such events but I think I forced myself to forget most of them because they gave me horrible feelings and huge insecurities. I loved him a lot as child,I was daddy's little girl,so when he got like that it would break my heart. So I guess I forced myself to forget about it as much as I can.Also,as I started to get older and older,he kind of started to love me less,at least that's how I feel.He is fond of little kids,he loves them and kids love him too but when they get somewhat older and start losing that childish innocence he's not really interested.I hope this doesn't make him sound weird,because he's really not.He was also like that with my brother.When he was a baby,he was over the moon,he played with him,adored him,as he got older that adoration just stopped. Btw he is terrifying when he's angry.But he's pretty chill nowadays,we never really had a proper conversation,just brief conversations,nothing special.I think that's enough about him. I don't know what to say about my brother,I am not really close to him,I guess I love him and yeah,I don't hate him but I don't have patience really to talk to him.Sometimes we get well great but most of the times not,which is kind of sad I suppose because I'm afraid that one day he might start sinking just like me and that I will be the main cause since I always pushed him away from me.Yeah,I feel a lot of guilt already.That's kind of the only thing I can feel.Guilt and regret.

So since you know about my relationships with my family members,let me talk about my problems. In my very first sentence I said that I always had a ""low mood"" and I still do and it just keeps getting worse.I always had these waves of depression where I would just fall into depths of the most horrible feelings or even more commonly than that,I just wouldn't feel anything.I would just be empty and basically a zombie throughout the day. The duration of that kind of state would vary,sometimes it would be a day,sometimes a few days and sometimes a week.Lately,it started to get longer.I used to be incredibly shy and even more anxious,but I overcame that and now I kind of have a bigger problem. (I think at least.) I can't feel anything.For quite some time,I'm talking a few years back I have this problem where I just started to lose feelings.Right now is the peak of it. I don't really feel anything.I can sometimes experience a moment of excitement (extremely rare) but because it's so sudden and it's so explosive,quickly after that I sink down so deep and I feel awful about whatever made me excited. I also had this particular issue ever since I was a child,which might be strange to hear.I told my mom about it not so long ago and she couldn't understand it. So basically, if people around me are happy and cheerful I would fall into pits of misery but if people around were down and sad or in a bad mood,I would light up and feel better.Don't get me wrong,I don't feel better because I'm glad that people are suffering around me,it's just simply like that.I have no control over it.I have no control over anything that I'm talking about.I am also not good at comforting,I lack empathy and I hate family deaths and funerals because I just don't know and can't function in those scenarios.I understand grief and all of that,I'm not stupid,but I just can't share any of that or act as if I feel the same and this is all something that I have had issues since I was a kid.I truly hate funerals and crying people.Crying,mourning people are a nightmare for me.When my grandma died,which I did love,she was dear to me and I remember her often and wish her the best,I was called heartless by my father because I didn't cry. As I've said,when others are miserable I am not,I wasn't glad to hear that she was gone,I actually let out a few tears when I saw my father crying so badly while comforting him but I was still heartless because I was composed and calm around a dozen people who were crying and miserable.Also fun fact,nobody even gave condolences to me,only a few people.Funny thing is,I am the person that looks like her the most so you'd think that people would at least do it because of that and because I'm her granddaughter but nah,literally 2 to three people only gave me their condolences. Also,I was terribly sick when she died and I had to put up with all that while being criticized for not crying enough.Anyway,let's move on..So, lately those depression waves became more common and they last longer.Honestly, for over a week now,maybe two,I haven't exited this current wave I'm in.I fake emotions and interactions and worry and everything that has to do with that emotional aspect. I've been doing that for as long as I can remember honestly,because I can never relate to anything that other people are telling or that are feeling.I fake it so good,that sometimes I convince myself that I truly feel something but I don't.I had troubles with relationships because of this,I just don't feel anything.Also,making friends for me is easy but staying one is hard.I don't know how to be normal and I think that I just make people worry about me.Even though I can't personally feel any true happy feelings,I know what it takes to make others smile and be happy.I'm very good with words and I have a sense of humor,so I would always make others feel good and happy since I can't really experience those things. When it comes to expressing emotions I can only cry,although very rarely when it truly cannot be helped,not necessarily because I feel something but rather because I realized something sad or I regret something. So,perhaps saying that my emotions are limited to only horrible ones is correct too.

When I was kid and trying to stay sane I tried to and I think I succeeded in building this massive defense mechanism so that nothing can get to me.I think that mechanism might've gotten crazy and out of control because I truly don't know why am I shutting down like this.I feel dead,very drained and just empty.This has been going on for years and years and only in recent years has it gotten so much worse.I also have some trauma from a relationship that I've been in and still am in because if I quit it I might never be in another relationship again because I'm just a mess and honestly have no patience or strength to start one from the beginning. The person that I'm in a relationship with, also doesn't get my issues so I had a few meltdowns because he just tells me to be normal and that all these issues are invalid. My last meltdown was pretty severe,I thought that I would end up in an emergency room.There was also a  break up that I never got over and I would cry over still.I lost the best friend that would die for me if I asked him to and I just ruined it. Technically,he's still my friend and he is still nice to me,but we will probably never be friends like we used to. (This is a super long story,but the point is that I messed up badly and yet he was still an angel to me which makes all of it even worse for me. It's okay since I deserve it.) 

That's pretty much everything that I wanted to say,I have tried before a few times to ask similar things but some people were rude and called me a psycho for not feeling empathy and a future serial killer and similar things and I didn't appreciate that because I don't think I am a bad person.I am actually really nice and I have learned from many mistakes in my past and I wish the best for everyone.Just because I can't feel emotions like others do doesn't mean I'm evil.Some people were trying to be helpful and tried to recommend tips and advice. Certain people even suggested that perhaps I'm on an autism spectrum but I really don't know and the country that I'm from isn't really a place where mental health is considered seriously,so yeah...I just want some help in understanding myself and why am I like this.I spoke about family relations because I thought that it might be useful,if there is someone who can help me,please ask me any additional questions and please be honest with me. (It's not like you can hurt my feelings or anything lol) For those who read all this,thank you so much and if you commented,thank you even more.I just want some help and understanding.I'm sick of being alone in this.I can't mask my troubles anymore and I need some guidance so I can be at least somewhat normal.Once again,thank you.",4.165867210368489,5.114116922705313,5.027671481686832,84.64749915046593,70.78000743218134,7.911482322735519,26.57915173771952,8.15956502246522,1.5541512274028904,10513,328,2140,145,187,3422,640,2691,0.172,0.679,0.15,-0.9953,4,1,8,0,3,0,262.0,5,10,9,27,133,170,20,10,87,5,272,17,7,19,30,434,434,196,6,75,85,14,23,16,6,43,3,12,0,12,152,131,0,8,66,8,1,24,70,73,2,13,109,45,265,95,231,239,62,213,6,18,8,7,175,89,2,60,110,1361,417,11,0.0,0.01992606700276751,0.049234558624088,0.0,0.0,0.01643393194591549,0.0149077585338252,0.0,0.0,0.017417927618636173,0.0,0.16138802815353676,0.1539291937390457,0.0,0.0,0.08005565636172647,0.017634685471136953,0.0,0.037998127820374004,0.03335701512668132,0.0,0.0,0.08303654871810195,0.059884801055783074,0.06288862019268435,0.0,0.01580065790533041,0.01293167102524067,0.07020983035535983,0.2767994860996254,0.0,0.014310510942818353,0.018947639114080442,0.05294699737837511,0.029747542896868512,0.018360427578270503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034345232683003345,0.0384696330579278,0.017146630506195592,0.01727627403953653,0.0,0.04346053482214789,0.0,0.018173815501522687,0.056586994639877465,0.053709835534873455,0.0,0.11083984670460664,0.043383758027152386,0.0,0.028969891826861906,0.0,0.03490795902862388,0.0,0.0,0.017213492563899268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028097838683598057,0.09458749711061104,0.014895372745823397,0.052131127347666416,0.0,0.11107844469437607,0.0304249045594492,0.014169525630406863,0.0,0.06045817968116636,0.032901615353870865,0.06341642220484288,0.0,0.18707627938724986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015370951667515443,0.02861002799412205,0.0,0.0,0.07795926381325602,0.0,0.1493702398708763,0.0,0.00955781095264131,0.11284621913832485,0.06725272368070695,0.018541427115904015,0.03705289241368552,0.049956106495004135,0.0,0.05370783874704888,0.015065236828529525,0.049811597324210866,0.0,0.017876287418727557,0.03790924080510169,0.019928898005121785,0.04508984295328308,0.0,0.0,0.03340727760138965,0.0,0.019405214481334254,0.03600710685236321,0.0,0.0,0.07021268290927841,0.0,0.014948226372658469,0.0,0.1401032655494957,0.08318245562299542,0.02741712361958969,0.018970948227780792,0.0,0.0,0.051591305401442966,0.011878745008120823,0.13967563467537947,0.06742248153196168,0.0,0.07441508839556585,0.014122520764385653,0.03762911167002533,0.018358361140361483,0.057190776638327084,0.12142808738611452,0.015913188636308202,0.06735513984028138,0.0341007468668666,0.016895506602028734,0.054957782482080816,0.0,0.0,0.016948152118275762,0.12488546735906972,0.033961897274057004,0.17726878212941785,0.0,0.05362323701782347,0.049451387535430345,0.01247001292141501,0.14267818982434938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238822532725132,0.04841072765842329,0.0,0.0,0.017910160111836264,0.09116814975536816,0.08953362333876849,0.0,0.0,0.037347836113427096,0.036423572651951314,0.01605427075898851,0.16322856912049713,0.05873780368529127,0.03514155639769228,0.03692127694407215,0.015898036842090672,0.0,0.0,0.11976658246580132,0.01813218177907612,0.09655284280405677,0.0,0.03381259998827078,0.03767904810047913,0.0715502109697286,0.016822118187856103,0.0,0.1400589337226636,0.017291259956430532,0.016605318639996855,0.10833463969855893,0.05715307545874832,0.014362110426885804,0.03199471502163806,0.06687002188923233,0.05051195559231715,0.01702027576779459,0.04020427083954522,0.015310081478169554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180851648974922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.014249470041770438,0.1035758783791132,0.11643102730813168,0.07530355804455327,0.09522848451031744,0.03585057779291995,0.10744424657966303,0.014060239149241665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.012644717498693891,0.09462126386440403,0.04409788476928385,0.04645006886524892,0.0,0.0,0.1452469760411927,0.08620814355136616,0.03304634860676421,0.05340507899645678,0.04903229314127233,0.0,0.015941087198846147,0.03213981215945058,0.0,0.05709012068613044,0.018292683735537114,0.016428319383622245,0.12255376329309242,0.0,0.04357493496383278,0.01852217420957555,0.1803913039275917,0.02975831043832307,0.02669800396570457,0.02698007583985114,0.0,0.030242025090636573,0.0,0.04552571554912359,0.0,0.038678744420820636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034158111499550566,0.05141561296649602,0.4061883834119063,0.03677473914944676,0.0,0.04331984734676228
mentalhealth,Depressed0Cat,2020/03/30,"What's wrong with me? So Basically the lockdown fucked me up a little. I finally reached out to someone 2 weeks ago to get some help for my mental health. 

I don't know where to start sooo basically I can't even describe myself. Everytime I try to say something about myself my Head just goes ""Wait that doesn't sound like you. You are not like this"" For example I'd say I am a really emotional Person. But at the same time I don't really have Emotions at all. I Either overreact or don't care at all. I, too, have a all Black or all White View on everything does that make sense? I can't feel anything between super positive or super negative. And at some point when my Emotions are too much to handle for me i stop feeling. Turning into a emotionless Thing that suddenly is super exhausted and can barely move. Is there something i can do to help myself when I'm like this?

Never talked about it with anybody. Just wanted to share my Thoughts after being silent for the past couple of Years and maybe someone can relate to this and give me some advice?",2.4529578754578765,4.844496750000005,3.760357142857142,85.74416666666667,79.09615384615384,6.846520146520146,23.366300366300365,7.957251820313856,1.4070858058608058,836,28,160,15,21,273,124,208,0.12300000000000001,0.748,0.129,0.3646,0,1,2,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,3,13,11,1,0,7,0,18,4,1,1,5,33,32,11,0,1,8,0,2,3,0,0,2,3,0,1,9,8,0,2,4,0,0,1,9,3,0,0,1,8,24,8,27,30,10,25,0,0,3,1,10,11,1,6,16,117,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297340876992525,0.12062453926945778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198023061750488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13874013320919842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15056722289072602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11908238263841035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4592067908960568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987793962201404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229772927572925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376097977812871,0.0,0.0,0.1490663066385402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258015039651305,0.07109490445020232,0.1305379872598211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13965482657749198,0.14464407434825305,0.0,0.0,0.18241982923291936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478466376387156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19944185488056446,0.13638545581388611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09083282252246053,0.0,0.13670819090405956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13713416648767876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446289023427093,0.10003265789692987,0.0,0.10495139690525064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299014207411648,0.0,0.11881766952359055,0.0,0.0,0.12863727065439592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174349528365842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216428661975584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305961361961317,0.20951829513071885,0.0,0.0,0.09631639159000972,0.0,0.0,0.11376692649988125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093739816546853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040387891104207,0.0,0.0,0.10803037616251963,0.07934791479310822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238772534418314,0.1480133007651344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026206573164739,0.0,0.10915320402637373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14877944114105146,0.0,0.08762948191658229
mentalhealth,suck_my_d33,2020/03/30,"My Asian upbringing ruined my mental health Many Asian families only care about reputation, getting their kids to focus on education just for the sake of that. I’ve been depressed, having anxiety since middle school, that affected my health and well-being. Everyday I have to worry that I won’t have a place to live and conflicts that can happen between me and especially my mother. I try to keep my distance, hoping to survive this life crisis, then make enough money to move out.",6.825517241379313,8.381477701149429,7.01902298850575,70.56577586206897,65.0919540229885,9.47816091954023,30.59195402298851,9.725611199111238,3.160664367816092,388,14,60,8,6,125,67,87,0.2,0.737,0.062,-0.9062,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,2,4,0,0,2,0,6,3,0,2,0,10,12,4,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,4,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,10,2,12,10,1,7,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,1,2,41,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16217756777347828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21614566082359396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825932042637343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21905016976890107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19985245030475496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110759985219334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18746875909412092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4506870263282608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105614304472388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884331890333488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14974015965454635,0.0,0.0,0.18719774634970407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415100302591304,0.21493227090458725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21364369740281386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253198764334425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161233711907057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214923488088298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21455286809268345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753665881809466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14393244034440072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906112835258639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152938322164408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alt4772,2020/03/30,"For people who didn't 'win the genetic lottery' There is solace and sanctuary here on Earth if we learn to enjoy life in other ways and just admit that the game is rigged and the whole social scene and even the biological state of Humanity itself is a broken game.. You can acknowledge that the World and biology itself is bullshit, and still have fun with the brain that you've got. It can be like your own little amusement park. Kind of sad I know, but over time you'll care less and can have fun with whatever bullshit, then pass into the spirit world and shit who knows, maybe there's someplace deeper and less empty and hollow than this World waiting for us. Shit, it's like, sometimes it seems like even death would be a complete Elysium compared to such a brutal World.",7.5510810810810804,7.231691810810815,7.012837837837839,77.73452702702704,63.32432432432432,9.562162162162162,29.986486486486484,8.841846274778883,2.2130648648648643,620,17,115,8,8,193,99,148,0.209,0.647,0.14400000000000002,-0.9407,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,2,3,0,1,8,14,3,0,10,0,14,4,3,0,0,25,21,13,1,2,3,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,12,14,0,1,6,3,0,1,1,4,0,0,2,0,6,10,13,15,4,15,1,1,0,0,12,9,2,2,6,79,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22295295324213316,0.0,0.0,0.2036272860922828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20940203960976705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638256213463601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15973388591383395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20797706965081206,0.21952116912846414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106775131778204,0.2927184997098424,0.2001713533600624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20064502791275773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846031703148248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818170829612808,0.0,0.0,0.41001828313476507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035888242260028,0.0,0.0,0.19752763919022467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15949620779241028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164580152308164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402379030756617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15852800028708486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229796293861048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187496441097572,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samian3,2020/03/30,"How do I keep my BPD from interfering with my love life? My BF and I have been together for almost a year. We've been through a lot and I honestly don't know why he puts with me. He could have ""up and left"" me long ago but he hasn't and am afraid that my BPD (borderline personality disorder) will eventually lead to that.

I never understood my behavior and why I experience outbursts/ strong emotions until I found out about BPD. I love my bf and I genuinely want us to last, but these behaviors are taking a toll on him and I can't keep this up, for his sake and mine (primarily his). He's considerate of my emotions and has not once given up on me. It's clear to me that he loves me and that he goes out of his way to comfort me and make me feel understood, but, that isn't his responsibility but mine.

Dealing with someone who has BPD can feel like a burden, but that isn't what I want our relationship to be. I acknowledge there are behaviors I need to change, but I'm trying to work on them.  I've never gone to therapy for it and unfortunately, I can't go because I've just moved out and am still figuring things out. Can any of you who have successfully overcome or dealt with this disorder share tips on how to keep it from interfering with my relationship? What helped you and your SO?

Initially, I posted this on the r/BorderlinePDisorder but thought about posting this here just in case any of you could help.",6.0362323943661975,5.741155475352116,6.996584507042254,76.51522887323947,66.42957746478874,11.184507042253523,31.482394366197184,10.820120047756994,3.1094197183098595,1121,39,238,29,16,377,142,284,0.038,0.8,0.162,0.9888,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,2,4,1,4,10,11,0,1,5,0,24,4,0,4,3,61,46,26,0,5,11,0,2,1,2,1,1,0,0,1,19,23,0,3,10,0,0,5,9,2,0,0,8,2,43,9,40,34,1,30,0,0,0,3,32,14,0,3,9,165,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990980905591991,0.0,0.10156549851777512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379490467712333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06182957210459025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5109801004291766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729738332721774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619640218349527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456782230293432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23249056838745175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281857137676693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921605408974953,0.0,0.0,0.10257009657961026,0.07246018900395462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121057526317014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057643874214540335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597011117039046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704616208749792,0.0,0.0,0.05574218048867072,0.0826773637333441,0.0,0.0,0.1102018271963635,0.0,0.07164160145744336,0.04955260126082371,0.0,0.0,0.08976059510682143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623046509045447,0.27462821102866103,0.0,0.06770398277552232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107801920507669,0.0,0.07520758255812676,0.1564550648326064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080175180032892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856302410798376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19427998826998227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196316239399024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177914439057308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593962182153048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100053801025657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626123895782624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599176640238082,0.0,0.06738426144492113,0.0,0.0,0.08052250853629317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886295935398866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200540482386606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964973376181498,0.08050883146799821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18304600175666805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384079764484303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531631154411388
mentalhealth,toxic1245,2020/03/30,"Taking time off work to deal with mental health and substance abuse? I have been struggling with my depression and drinking/drugs for quite a few months now. I feel like i have hit an all time low. Its gotten to the point im not sure i want to be alive. 
I had to take a week off due to covid-19, and i spent all that time drinking and suffering. Im supposed to go back to work tomorrow, but i feel like i cant. Im so f*cking depressed. 
I had an intake appointment this morning for counselling with someone that specializes in addiction and substance abuse, and i have a doctors appointment this afternoon. I really, really want to get better. I dont know what my chances are of my doctor agreeing that i could take some time off work. 
I feel bad wanting more time off, since I already missed a week. Plus im still on probation, so im worried they would just let me go. 
Also i dont think i can even afford to take the time off, but i dont know if i can afford to keep feeling like this either. 
I dont know what to do...",2.9856428571428566,4.2323622666666685,4.082083333333333,89.17312500000001,73.95238095238095,7.345238095238094,26.458333333333336,7.865858978985527,1.3841190476190484,796,28,172,11,16,259,109,210,0.17,0.731,0.099,-0.9308,2,0,3,0,2,0,26.0,0,0,1,5,8,13,0,1,8,0,19,5,0,0,3,34,42,13,0,6,6,0,4,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,9,10,1,1,8,1,1,2,6,7,0,0,5,4,25,6,25,32,6,26,0,5,0,0,2,9,0,2,18,110,34,5,0.0,0.204247928270332,0.0,0.09396249774846548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511551670952503,0.06892807461999333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627667706858667,0.07196709913854056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07623022153561905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881766127137967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886063575850517,0.14847486930136178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644325867141186,0.0,0.0,0.4040676583795188,0.08443579147346751,0.09995588277714712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056929303211632074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743259788937898,0.1847277198740756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04503199994647231,0.0,0.09797031624983203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161854845547278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4655132071004174,0.0,0.0,0.07661181374897978,0.0,0.0,0.14210735638461205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813762431177201,0.0,0.12632783836986164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868617213243206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879799475493198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147972924389542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916762848624526,0.0,0.0,0.11043418670795788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129928894391832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303058688344137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06883340539999354,0.0,0.0,0.0901070676967653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123536819884668,0.0,0.25922399561470305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055228644462152233,0.0,0.0,0.301557079710438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15251562827247106,0.0,0.13827677569539107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18824739998774245,0.08753262129502545,0.0,0.061228646602813186,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Atlauae,2020/03/30,"I feel lost Okay. I'm 17, from the Netherlands and have a 21 year old girlfriend in America. We got in to a relationship really fast, but everything was okay. She has a lot of mental disorders, which was fine too. But she ran out of meds about 1 week ago. Because of this her DID (one alter as far as I know, her at 9 years old, completely harmless) was worse then ever and we were trying everything to prevent her parents finding out, they did right before she could get meds again, and made her go through shock therapy. The shock therapy doesn't make any positive difference and never has. She basically lost all her memories of me and her relationship. Of course some have returned by now. But after the shock she has been a lot.... harsher. The 'softness' she always had is gone, which may just have been the thing I loved most about her. And because I can't stop comparing her to how she was before the shock she has gotten mad at me like 3 or 4 times alreadt. She still says she's in love with me, but the differences are just way too hard too handle for me. Whenever I try talking about it to her I just get her mad for not patient and focussing on the negative stuff. And whenever I try to vent to friends they just tell me to focus on the positive stuff and to just have patience. And I try, I try hard as I can. But I just feel broken and don't know what to do. I feel lost and hopeless and have no idea how to cope. She got mad at me again yesterday and probably still is since she hasn't been returning the 'I love you' either. I don't know what to do anymore, I try as hard as I can. But I don't know how I should do it and if I can.",2.1785329524586814,3.8579497159763316,3.5833278922668867,90.1310355029586,76.98816568047337,7.383962456641503,24.081207916751683,8.216663640201805,1.2642182003672722,1276,42,283,23,29,419,160,338,0.18899999999999997,0.722,0.08900000000000001,-0.9896,1,0,0,0,0,1,38.0,2,1,2,3,21,20,3,0,14,2,38,3,0,5,3,62,62,32,0,3,16,1,7,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,10,20,0,2,9,0,0,3,10,11,0,1,20,8,52,9,41,39,6,37,0,4,0,3,38,12,0,7,22,208,62,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102651596483924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605768893396432,0.0,0.0,0.062159684009515374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065087526635407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144134024610963,0.0,0.1555607223906051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583817590501742,0.0,0.0,0.07298080453478221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910010733019496,0.10475998641818976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826825846897577,0.0,0.0,0.1643008789693677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865390754284468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354405914590163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062058233681219,0.0,0.09551244622928264,0.0,0.05194852867960914,0.0,0.14621256110714567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24564732175489196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318702751478652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20093890643104834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044656691848408286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993436012501809,0.15542139905917596,0.24749432079729114,0.08649122067316438,0.06101467569386256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030644539661125,0.0,0.0921164449417488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704984747579355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19183189084041746,0.0,0.061939539107080166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149631254861466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855187237344512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05855746653688582,0.0,0.0,0.19627315519775498,0.0,0.07806081425000437,0.0,0.07269026908214561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561255895293142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599500221753578,0.07642008617932486,0.0,0.0,0.20927758352861187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734692354006388,0.07989347641066184,0.0,0.20906303351944655,0.0,0.060726543555998214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053299976304144826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723548565437412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725543762882988,0.07332093355315894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315122671234598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117725823592884
mentalhealth,PurpleBiQueen,2020/03/30,"Overwhelmed with emotion I'm 17, I'm from Nigeria and I've been struggling with heavy feelings of inadequacy and a lack of motivation. I'm also prone to moments of overwhelming emotion. It's usually triggered by something but my emotional responses see disproportionate. I tried looking for help online, but that's kind of difficult when I don't know what's wrong with me.

I think I might be depressed, I'm hesitant to call it depression, because the feelings usually manifest as intense anger and frustration that comes out as tears and it usually has a trigger, though the emotional responses don't really seem proportionate. I can't really be sure till a professional diagnosis it. Unfortunately, that'll be difficult because Nigeria isn't exactly a hotbed of enlightened ideas about mental health.

Basically, all I'm asking for is advice. How do I know if I have a mental illness or if I'm being dramatic? If i do have one what am I even supposed to do about it?",6.2407044079516005,8.035196544943823,7.648876404494381,64.61146499567849,66.69662921348315,11.544338807260154,38.4114088159032,11.362043627235082,5.277556093344859,787,44,124,27,13,270,104,178,0.24,0.66,0.1,-0.9832,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,7,12,2,3,7,0,19,2,0,4,3,32,35,17,0,4,6,0,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,10,9,0,0,9,0,0,1,4,10,0,1,1,4,11,2,21,28,2,8,0,4,2,0,3,1,0,6,6,85,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456867363183782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019430036245851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191734277244309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541712363167848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016787750426084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098098169880524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21959084484507235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5735761397090405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841971024962466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12891201441650454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550168155380854,0.0,0.0,0.08544488850025853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14390558276699145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13274727875856498,0.14011562851918732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070482514925376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569328918766707,0.13523254443488714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638145400831462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16332956865419185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10158235836478287,0.11604992336632836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813772681121387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13326623700798462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12014520179760585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168186814481271,0.1252451278205238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654825436490081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4211924477339914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937566779756458,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lovejo1,2020/03/30,"Depression, bipolar, question... where to go. Is this a good sub for asking questions about bipolar, anxiety, depression, etc? My wife suffers from some combination of these things (and perhaps something else). The result is violent mood swings. The issue is that I don't know how to react to these. As her husband, I want to be a better husband, but sometimes I really don't know if the things she brings up during these times are what she says they are, if there's a deeper issue (with me), or what. I'm just confused and the outbursts during these times make it very hard to talk in constructive ways. I know I'm not perfect and there's things I need to change, but sometimes she paints a picture of me that I just don't think is real (at least to the extent that she feels it)... but I don't want to ignore her.   


Anyway, I'm looking for a place to get info on all of this, but don't want to go into details if this is the wrong place. I'm sure now that counciling would be beneficial, but with CONV19, I'm not sure how realistic that is at this point.",5.06078021978022,5.355019957142861,5.65666666666667,83.27884615384616,68.47619047619048,8.366300366300367,28.534798534798533,8.139509932561175,1.7527326007326014,821,26,167,10,13,266,111,210,0.11199999999999999,0.7909999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.6229,0,0,1,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,1,2,10,13,1,1,11,0,16,2,0,5,4,45,37,15,0,8,13,3,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,20,6,0,1,8,0,0,3,7,7,0,0,0,4,17,5,26,34,5,17,0,3,1,0,15,10,0,8,3,117,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451037173642144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12771691410061126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082517852110745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452092978765047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353332081142226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412459801378735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15236223214248432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06907682772136231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137588377796694,0.0,0.1552833077511688,0.11458647710913475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238052302877485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851818712009494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252406769710164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11472248974920005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119180950765576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129855380755448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28546793528333425,0.0,0.1291456673406769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060809243324113,0.0,0.0,0.15549818154963546,0.08751929389046582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864201269312077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517317378971036,0.27023215633876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25751670839018337,0.0,0.0,0.10980624649951393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722835119112495,0.08753760243895274,0.0,0.0,0.1593230228831343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272197441532113,0.2417378257869775,0.1084389089376879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704762766475704,0.14936744316004688,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,everbeentolondon,2020/03/30,"Advice/ information very much needed! Hello, for the sake of anonymity I don’t want to divulge names or my relationship with this person but they are going through some really tough times mentally and I very much want to help but I am lucky enough to have basically no background or previous experiences with mental heath issues but when I asked for how they were feeling I received this text “It’s like being in a dream where u can’t move or scream and u need to i can’t stop panicing and not being able to even move or do anything or out of nowhere I get overwhelmed feelings of guilt or paranoia or just complete panic and I can’t control. I spent last night just alone in the dark sitting up trying not to do something crazy all night” I don’t know how to help with this or even what this might be, I know it’s sort of a long shot but if anyone has suggestions for ways to feel better that I could pass on that would be wonderful.",2.91,5.028847272727276,3.5919786096256696,88.90208556149734,76.27272727272728,6.325133689839571,24.368983957219246,7.285733465282438,0.9889593582887696,748,25,151,9,17,236,116,187,0.138,0.713,0.149,0.5156,0,1,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,2,8,9,0,4,4,0,19,0,0,3,1,48,33,20,0,7,17,0,3,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,9,8,0,2,7,1,1,5,8,6,0,0,2,4,15,3,24,24,5,20,0,1,0,0,12,6,0,14,8,104,24,0,0.13455704285396128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148758497219964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936051611582012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408541297056873,0.0,0.1107289812657328,0.0,0.12579267120284593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900476974222544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14108049937750686,0.0,0.1509171651783058,0.10743284971266087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13903339463295633,0.0,0.1777473155346929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162260738337642,0.0,0.0,0.20410825156119336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030050125405722,0.0,0.0764718683221756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18038149896855596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14044259372228948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14789806356371968,0.10968194901525363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573777439968,0.0,0.0,0.11907874866255125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712037020851138,0.1427437585948923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860256838136202,0.197829817658888,0.19954468462022626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252545339148759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31574739570929244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749001971298892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620068718224629,0.0,0.0,0.1444639074576153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358858545131017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249571289145148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846129376721958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135539954157372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220473046160804,0.1587304602560681,0.10680511750266787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14592137315596104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558546261329197,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UniqueImpress,2020/03/30,"How are you staying well? Hello everybody - I host a weekly health and science radio show on public radio - it's called ""The Pulse"" [www.whyy.org/thepulse](https://www.whyy.org/thepulse). I'm looking for people's experiences in terms of staying well during this time of crisis. Can you see your therapist, have you found new ways to connect? Are you able to get medications if needed? Are there self care things that really help you? It would be great if you could tape a voice memo for the show with your phone and send it to me. Maiken Scott, mscott@whyy.org. Say your name first and where you are. Thank you!",4.714874213836482,7.974665613207549,2.9946226415094337,89.3257704402516,76.83018867924528,5.79748427672956,19.21069182389937,7.1686216300943375,0.4209899371069188,489,11,85,6,12,136,77,106,0.036000000000000004,0.8059999999999999,0.158,0.9208,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,11,0,1,5,5,0,0,4,0,9,2,0,1,0,12,17,6,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,6,4,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,4,13,5,10,13,1,12,0,0,2,0,20,3,0,2,5,53,19,1,0.18681842653728456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19076250104683967,0.0,0.1904738366502096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491593120363005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827442687989576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589076581763768,0.0,0.20483676201026368,0.0,0.0,0.09760491721952798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20596797478433884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19857925138566399,0.0,0.0,0.12522045334452134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568804268682887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18819991044102216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13852349610970918,0.0,0.1804304004890095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951637432735166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11968066779899388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485655111250379,0.0,0.0,0.1488700984869944,0.0,0.194892362463282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3982471714123011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719973073083471,0.0,0.2169105922387548,0.1241138614036267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893532686788003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482877713033123,0.14985447305443472,0.0,0.33594440289618865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271045012957447,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nortonsky,2020/03/30,"Is anyone else extremely irritable and having anger attacks due to being isolated at home? My university is closed, all coffee shops and libraries near me are closed. It's been like this for two weeks and I feel like I'm going insane. I'm lashing out at my parents all the time even though it's none of this is their fault. In 1 minute I can go from being relatively calm to being extremely stressed and feeling hopeless. It's so exhausting and I can't continue to live like this. My meds help my depression and my ADHD, but they're not helping me stay calm AT ALL.

I already texted my doctor to see if he can prescribe me something that'll help, but he hasn't replied yet (and maybe he won't).

I feel like I'm going insane. Is anyone else going through something similar?",3.9081372549019626,5.551750614379087,4.884460784313728,82.75257352941179,72.26797385620915,7.714379084967319,28.43627450980393,8.344100000000001,2.034054901960784,616,24,118,10,12,201,93,153,0.163,0.7140000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.6485,1,0,2,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,1,0,4,13,2,1,1,0,16,2,0,0,3,20,27,12,0,1,4,1,3,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,7,10,0,0,3,1,1,4,5,7,0,1,1,4,15,6,14,21,4,18,0,2,1,0,8,8,0,1,9,72,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17696600638488436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16249414807228024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059213887257149,0.3017502593969966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675182476157503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268262962338083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071671790664246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460171293502396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725730296954062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233622263262328,0.21039100316963508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3347425031397451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29609591642795724,0.0,0.14770385735424826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877558458579411,0.0,0.13002453694036142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479325182251655,0.0,0.16356166706508507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635038112990538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117339265971588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22672064349591425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15694901542925704,0.0,0.0,0.16867449320289968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446724766145312,0.0,0.08586271805394652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14384195241205258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811514904252345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zlobert7498,2020/03/30,"Help me feel happy and interested Hey guys,im new here and this is my first post.
So 2 years ago i got depersonalization/derealization. Its better than it used to be,but one thing troubles me the most. And that is feeling emotions and interest in life(going out,chatting with friends etc). Im just really emotionless and i dont have any interest like i used to have before in life(in just regular stuff,reading a book,having interest in someones story,enjoying a talk,just the basic stuff). Can any of you tell me how to get that back in my life(just the excitement and feeling of life)? Thank you (:",4.771494591937072,6.714977044247793,5.596932153392334,77.29819075712884,70.59292035398232,9.270009832841692,31.13962635201573,9.725611199111238,3.1429614552605702,478,21,88,12,9,156,81,113,0.024,0.667,0.309,0.9855,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,0,2,6,11,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,3,0,16,14,8,0,0,2,0,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,3,10,10,11,13,2,10,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,6,55,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13406173189840298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056915515456504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629127276582757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286908341715009,0.0,0.0,0.13375609456738832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17724765466075848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701203255984048,0.0,0.0,0.1686682972902734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294086418295584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864140151757733,0.0,0.0,0.1168446830399959,0.0,0.0790146522214231,0.0,0.08595099568867506,0.0,0.12095737385420186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099370589733736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137041097809292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32672201285521835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4272902931597374,0.07388634916314075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14606482696712764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024815368994436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484243696077748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15127708792348868,0.0,0.09688575753305582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281419086645204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462584434400846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215578977051804,0.13218707095397422,0.1392379380787103,0.0,0.0,0.1004745854413102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612389709853432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097391129385821
mentalhealth,XIIWolfgang,2020/03/30,"I discovered I'm Bipolar. I've been Bipolar for a long time, maybe from since I was a kid and experienced all the trauma I did, but I recently found out I have it, not by a Doctor, by me. I've studied my actions and behaviors and over the years everything I read about Bipolar applies to me 100%. and I live in a third world country with no Doctor to see or anyone to help me, my life is slowly fading and i'm dying slowly in every aspect of my life, I tried running away to Europe but they rejected me, everyday I look in the mirror I see this different person in front of me, slowly changing to an evil person I don't like. no one cares about me or will care at all, I've accepted that fact, I now wait for my life to end either by a disease or something. not everyone gets to do what he loves in life I guess, maybe It's my fault i'm this messed up and maybe not. this is mainly not seeking attention or anything, just to let you know if you do have Bipolar or a mental issue, definitely seek help, It destroyed my life and it consumed me, you don't want that to happen to you, don't hurt the people you love, seek help. if you read thanks for taking the time.",4.211358024691357,4.271031205761318,5.635818930041154,83.51051851851851,70.27572016460906,8.455308641975309,27.722633744855965,8.238735603445708,1.6865206584362131,905,28,193,12,15,307,127,243,0.122,0.716,0.161,0.9262,1,3,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,6,1,0,4,14,2,0,12,0,14,13,0,0,3,34,33,16,1,3,15,0,0,1,0,1,11,0,0,3,10,9,0,1,4,2,0,3,9,7,0,2,4,4,33,7,32,27,4,23,0,2,3,2,16,11,0,8,10,131,43,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177382639431982,0.0,0.0962394935086949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098779275431268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23847566799518405,0.0,0.12371708944099902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137514196581704,0.12218736114512425,0.0,0.23940558678410626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358256580830803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853501796359326,0.11175028194599633,0.10510669122447576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282291166846048,0.0,0.0,0.061101299377632826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288330856945123,0.0,0.10341807784354708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351664022458408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251968842521073,0.0,0.0,0.12206491861822424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427239989741518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958881186507868,0.41302453705591,0.0571356300789153,0.0,0.10326857230868286,0.10349664855518408,0.0982081456717053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21110302285278426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3524745478343385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785761337276762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924802414146538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107807462488971,0.2042316268108547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339623444089137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547354605662252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863872582479204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674185477778174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003345721380211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793148750192765,0.0,0.0,0.1076714090372839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13638841585786274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794010500292245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689798593142729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531165911675572
mentalhealth,choco-filled,2020/03/30,"Everyones attitude is ruining my mental health I cant stop thinking about how there are a lot of people in this world who are so cruel and selfish. Like all around the world. Everything. From customer service horror stories, jerk politicians, entitled people, etc. Everything. 

I just want to calm my mind. I want peace and quiet inside my head but everything stresses me out. I try to keep away from social media but i always feel like i need to know whats happening in the outside world. Like if i dont, im ignorant. 

When this pandemic started, its all i ever think. From the minute i wake to before i sleep. 

Im trying to be productive at home. Every day ive tried working out but i just dont feel the energy. I try to study but my mind flies and ends up thinking about these awful things that are currently happening.",2.2117610062893083,4.849839138364786,3.6625471698113214,84.53709119496857,82.1446540880503,7.055345911949687,23.927672955974842,8.167268648758528,1.8160842767295609,649,24,119,14,18,213,102,159,0.129,0.7490000000000001,0.122,-0.6394,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,10,10,2,1,5,1,9,4,3,1,3,32,22,11,0,4,7,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,8,6,0,3,6,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,0,3,18,4,20,21,4,18,0,1,0,0,2,11,0,2,10,78,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502149938982533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235865317760801,0.0,0.0,0.11858372142936956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740018886065683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139862762795883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29584751250123825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117895686914063,0.0,0.14076377001053292,0.0,0.11416924625574427,0.10634209601966213,0.12060442529493695,0.3403033585876634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763681069379354,0.090168457817098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22322409619432568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295336302337758,0.1341612925331798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12660454896477594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726690374764485,0.0,0.0,0.11218623443777544,0.0,0.0,0.06936479905885228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18498771661788824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10730399907779757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271956498000117,0.0,0.2548835744492011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358727638770396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750040254731575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630676254435394,0.12866092084996614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893360591926914,0.0,0.0,0.10552190247353656,0.14457955612220896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385204371052732,0.24262160176546144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3427684598135277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488904751675491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918864681301966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prettynig,2020/03/30,"i would appreciate an advice as soon as possible. im 18 M

i will go thru everything briefly

basically, for particular reason i cut off my close friends and ended up alone. 

basically, i spend most of my time alone home

i had a month break this February off uni, and thats when problems started

basically, i started to think that i had some sort of mental disability, for no reason at all. now im kinda over it, but i have been beat of my rail. 

haven't been around my peers in probably two months. obviously cuz of corona two.

i get distorted sense of self.

and now i randomly came across this website that is full of incels.

everything there is cynical, nyhilstic, just depressing asf

at first i didn't now it, and i dont know if its my current mental state or not but it influenced me a lot

and made me kinda cynical about everything

i do know that its the isolation but is there anything i could do to avoid this type of thinking?

the site, btw, included, bunch of guys who are frustrated by life rating each others appearance, doing it really roughly, even telling each other to kill themselves. basically, for them there's only one standart of looks they follow, and they despise everything else. and it got me. i tried ignoring it but that type of thinking is stuck with me. that looks is the only thing that matters, that you are a genetic trash  (im actually pretty good looking btw) and you don't deserve to live if you are ugly. when for most people looks are matter of taste, its the opposite for them. there's only one type of physical apperance that matters and if you don't have it you should die, you shouldnt reproduce.

its so fucked up basically, and i truly feel so sorry for all of them

btw, its not too serious, i dont feel suicidal or anything, but i just cant stop thinking about it. and you know how it is? the more you dont want to think about something, the more your brains spams that thought. 

how can i get rid of that?

again everything started probably months ago as i mentioned, and i havent been quite like myself ever since.

will i even be back to my normal self ever?",3.6002410329985683,5.465796082926833,4.827087517934004,81.93285509325682,73.53658536585365,8.530846484935438,27.42467718794835,9.168548406835145,2.359454806312769,1654,63,322,38,34,546,202,410,0.16899999999999998,0.767,0.064,-0.9939,1,4,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,9,5,3,27,15,7,1,10,0,37,4,1,7,5,77,66,32,3,10,14,0,3,1,1,5,1,0,1,3,32,18,1,3,13,0,1,4,13,12,0,5,11,8,47,3,45,48,12,41,0,1,4,1,21,13,1,14,23,237,79,3,0.0,0.0,0.07845220149430061,0.0,0.0,0.0785593398048951,0.0712637530837029,0.0,0.0,0.16652629437589894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323135665978465,0.07156702441589258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181743612303881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08974543904063267,0.0,0.09194844500735884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418745730685971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924257638486635,0.0,0.08343548653633696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28266082164257506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671582328621156,0.0,0.0712045451393359,0.0,0.0,0.10619794837246564,0.1454405691640536,0.0,0.0,0.3612612837564577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129847135894484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06838244549188405,0.0,0.0,0.062111614726983774,0.07432225126350804,0.08400429542666876,0.0,0.04568932869447078,0.0674300321444731,0.0642978149091155,0.0,0.0,0.07960194306889455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064097059442947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605154713587814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894320441009547,0.0,0.13254606015972664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056784120113178425,0.039276074301417004,0.0,0.07098870028028023,0.0,0.270040282820279,0.0,0.0,0.06834745437705274,0.0,0.0760700237516707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620349464396553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925073419909852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787683022018897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895307464437337,0.18342803595934232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05573454740561524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063129430975696,0.0,0.08178882292499999,0.17335501138430884,0.07692546952990692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550810230901372,0.0,0.0,0.05150196558250974,0.16531527221148287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1677353565696321,0.0,0.0,0.0665021155986381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061890640748314525,0.0,0.08999364583607793,0.17070823871544424,0.0,0.0,0.06721234508567467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793715185847065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026723175902931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05340969377826034,0.2575636975332988,0.0,0.06382324939030584,0.046877942430031884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05458173010870828,0.0,0.1570650199999266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047418013523027006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710904827579996,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jamesmfaux,2020/03/30,"I feel like nothing is normal (18m) To give some context, my house and all my belongings were lost in a fire 5 months ago. I was hardly concerned with losing my stuff, but my mom and baby brothers barely made it out alive. Getting used to a new house is tough, and it took a toll on my family. A couple months later my older brother was almost killed when he was hit by a drunk driver. I drove to the hospital as soon as I heard, and spend the night there. Seeing him broken and helpless ready took a mental toll on me. A couple months later (present day) one of my best friends and I had a falling out, I'm quarantined and socially isolated which is making me lose my mind (extrovert here), and I'm trying to stay sane but I just want things to be normal for once. My dad just saved a man's life by CPR on him when a guy collapsed, so he's shaken up from that. I want to feel normal when I wake up, and for one month have nothing trying to kill me or my family. I also lost my cowboy hat, which was my favorite thing I've bought post-fire, and that feels terrible for some reason and it's made that feeling of loss come back. Now I feel like I'm going to lose everything and anything could happen. Like the world could end or I could die or someone else could die any day. I hate this feeling of unease. Any advice?",2.8195765243366715,4.124046715867159,3.986030574591464,89.46950799507998,74.46125461254613,6.637919522052362,22.129854155684413,7.07126945348624,0.5627130908451945,1024,25,218,10,21,334,152,271,0.21899999999999997,0.642,0.139,-0.9790000000000001,0,1,0,0,0,1,31.0,0,0,0,7,12,19,3,1,13,0,15,3,1,5,1,49,45,24,4,9,7,4,8,3,1,0,1,1,0,2,12,16,1,0,7,1,2,6,0,13,0,2,15,10,29,6,28,24,4,36,0,7,1,0,14,9,0,6,23,132,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464154665723042,0.07678112235392967,0.0,0.0867348407311259,0.0,0.0,0.06926792464027001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780564045200395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127876168759731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660345436752921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089964519164337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746132432579795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27662786759361346,0.1916810697604284,0.0,0.11172214876227096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17979042705992904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723577452958904,0.0,0.07671733042291212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784615777185504,0.0,0.1633104018122674,0.0,0.2627782402619249,0.12375901352968535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692040881359769,0.0,0.04525403031913658,0.08309132811891977,0.049226679552488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576487016063508,0.07659550415374525,0.0,0.07759220070526908,0.08551677616092865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19988976129643068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19165869786119527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06118044988522019,0.12695069804885598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29070823296309656,0.18910630591949065,0.0,0.0,0.16391900646274174,0.05781780475256665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728999322827387,0.0,0.08745890886461337,0.1014452829998127,0.2765488136646159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365565021543778,0.0,0.08128458710054355,0.2546000619082332,0.1662235135326951,0.0,0.0,0.09224473228521744,0.11738841968203265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295555127360907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905714050545706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690228744868544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829555827888065,0.07339066434926332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09232265178335147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991562302507114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508953866232274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19247029571494548,0.1176150936884712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480964593998082,0.0,0.0,0.10217840460396503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mausxrat,2020/03/30,"Mental health draining, physical health to follow Hi guys, I'm sure many of us are in the same rocking boat currently. With the quarantine, each day is full of more ups and downs than I was prepared for. Does anyone else find themselves extremely nauseous throughout the days? I've tried to keep my routine the same but find my anxiety is through the roof. Remembering to take medication is my main priority, but I'm losing motivation to eat regularly as my constant nausea is killing my appetite. I never realized how much going through my Mon-Fri motions actually kept me in check. Anyways, sorry, this is mostly a vent post but I'm here to talk to anyone feeling the same or different. I hope you all are well today, and if not, that tomorrow brings you clarity and stability.",6.18,7.623878111111113,6.906555555555558,71.194,66.5,10.204444444444446,35.927777777777784,10.355215969177356,4.090457777777777,624,31,105,16,10,206,103,144,0.084,0.8,0.11599999999999999,0.4588,2,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,2,0,2,4,5,1,0,7,0,8,4,0,2,3,28,19,10,1,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,5,1,2,6,1,1,4,2,2,1,0,2,1,13,3,18,17,10,17,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,4,7,72,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.15828300012263893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408192713869973,0.0,0.0,0.2268268730199027,0.16619222557578353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17527968900175864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20921010269114096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16946361857555955,0.0,0.0,0.14194159362569142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597025206603416,0.13549660019576004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201277788879557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964942202387205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218153068496858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16060268704443526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34482028267515874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16110038169685348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441700819240702,0.17944935854443542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18145939113286025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16444450822809548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339860752037708,0.1634586216745172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923505863682622,0.0,0.12509800526252382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15534197643907893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18374004972637908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18156870022243388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287080562709818,0.0,0.12195359584785395,0.13036955520442894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537458552019284,0.0,0.0,0.11012259476387223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951056399617623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14583654027482654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bluecollarbikeowner,2020/03/30,"I wake up confused/disoriented This has been going on for maybe 2 years, and it seems to happen in relapses. 

I can wake up in the middle of the night 100% convinced of something that is totally unrealistic. This morning I woke up with my belt under my pillow because I woke up at 3AM hiding everything in my bed under my pillows because I was afraid that crows would fly in and snatch my things if left in the open. 

I can wake up seeing a shadowy figure looking at me. Some nights ago I woke up to a figure with glowing eyes looking at me who started running out of my eyes immediate view as soon as I saw it. 

I can wake up seeing large spiders or insects crawling at the walls/roof and only by running to the doorway and turning on the lights is the illusion broken. 

I can wake up convinced that someone is gonna come into my apartment either through the door or the windows. 

This only happens when I sleep, I have no hallucinations otherwise, no history of mental illness. The only drug I ever tried has been alcohol, I do take Humira. I'm 26 years old, male.  Can this all be stress related?",5.1761993355481755,5.901378995348837,6.370448504983388,76.74238372093023,68.34883720930233,8.561461794019934,33.03156146179402,8.634040054169528,2.752016611295681,864,38,158,13,14,291,126,215,0.07400000000000001,0.9,0.026000000000000002,-0.8316,0,0,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,12,0,17,11,8,0,3,22,35,10,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,5,1,11,10,1,0,3,0,0,4,2,2,0,0,7,10,23,2,37,25,4,41,0,0,9,0,2,27,0,5,10,116,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241615858572124,0.17169759915280422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19587473799789665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383951049248964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18631559104458534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14532694579344455,0.0,0.0,0.14439162141211098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130726911595877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841437356497501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745584943759836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698293177002261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614054280635854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190835894844324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30153866711466243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685865464065055,0.0,0.0,0.36656947084403696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560518090280062,0.1462596128591732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16077688725833425,0.0,0.1361274252347679,0.12368457913563866,0.0,0.0,0.11371658355888463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840364722067645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079697215913796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673593643328644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090781778208436,0.1747528806512157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412886529247235,0.0,0.0,0.20692065261345186
mentalhealth,leroy2007,2020/03/30,"I called a suicide hotline recently and was dismissed because I’m a man and I have Tourette’s. 💦🦄😖 I looked the # up on Google cause I was feeling unstable with signs of psychosis. I know these symptoms well enough after years of dealing with my illness.  I forced myself to remain calm so I could clearly communicate my situation. The woman (her name was Rachel)  speaking with was clearly overwhelmed by how many calls they’ve been getting.  When I told her I was having a mental health crisis she took me seriously enough, but then my verbal tics started.  I could tell that my tics were scaring her so I told her “I’m safe, I just have Tourettes”.  Then I heard the dreaded word come out of my mouth....cunt.  It was clearly a tic, but Rachel’s reaction was to tell me I couldn’t talk to her that way. Her tone went from scared shitless to anger. That was when I knew that there is not going to be any help for me. At least not from a woman.  I realized then that I wasn’t going to be able to get reliable help and to just get off the phone. To be honest, it kinda ramped up my paranoia also. 

Before I got off the phone I calmed myself and quietly told her, “YOU are a mental health professional who has trained for this. When a person experiencing a mental health crisis calls you and uses a word YOU find offensive you need to remember that YOU’RE feelings at that moment are minuscule compared to the pain the person on the other end is going through. Please think about this because you’re hurting some people more than you’re helping them”. 


I am so angry about this. I did everything right. I know from experience how broken our mental health system is, but this really hits a new low.  I took extensive notes because it seemed important and am really tempted to get that woman fired from her job for being so unprofessional, but frankly I’m worried I’ll get a woman on the line in HR and will again be dismissed because of sexism. From now on I will ask for and only speak with men when calling the Suicide Hotline(s).   

One thing I know for sure, I am not calling 911 for a trip to the psych ward anytime soon. If the mental health system is in this much crisis just over the phone imagine how bad it’s falling apart face to face. 

Thank god I’m already so used to self-isolating.",3.786923937360178,5.546196277404923,4.457869127516781,85.2173182326622,72.80313199105146,6.935346756152126,26.510626398210288,7.594959193182576,1.4283149888143174,1804,63,349,22,36,576,226,447,0.193,0.7070000000000001,0.1,-0.9951,1,0,0,0,0,2,43.0,1,4,1,0,23,18,2,4,25,0,35,10,2,6,4,58,72,29,2,5,11,0,3,0,0,2,8,4,0,8,21,14,0,1,12,0,0,9,5,11,1,1,21,9,52,7,54,40,6,46,0,3,1,0,47,17,0,4,17,234,73,3,0.07461139387202934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233552846762512,0.05966670472310773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05073830636669496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975158147252578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06229739736314045,0.18192965274587436,0.0,0.06348880079627388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.380932875986368,0.0,0.0,0.07664645416091312,0.0,0.06427110927644385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191422536448808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692107090675136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608354913563848,0.15418702950515098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705590984173056,0.07298426001084984,0.0,0.0,0.07545152512649332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06819346229966605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194906869132088,0.0,0.1272101236731624,0.0,0.05967354756000556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39654211349948204,0.0,0.0,0.15003133371521368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798730402895599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404029569105026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12301341244664095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265477949278161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756442426649048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37595368117940975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05484795939295013,0.0553234031585708,0.0,0.07206014913462915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05055861144573761,0.0567453271578515,0.07939178357424292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05172614606025835,0.13029558246687106,0.0,0.0819009050904162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559593889670306,0.0,0.07366975026300399,0.0,0.08452016463502221,0.06371772269698303,0.0,0.0,0.14939804265760065,0.0,0.0,0.06792341077311646,0.0778359559488965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386633280701941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052810328605359114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632255099534942,0.0,0.07032035573481088,0.07754980642551687,0.0,0.05996981216496865,0.13042729374891754,0.06869214712045764,0.0,0.0,0.049568494766849526,0.04780796851715476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21388315273729352,0.16579200780207054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288805772057464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922305158109626,0.0,0.0,0.06708460355913769,0.06916550961893964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577149220029092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04804729142294913
mentalhealth,tarakancz,2020/03/30,"This quarantine has completely fucked my life up. I have been working on my mental illness for longer than I care to remember. It has taken me so long to get my shit together and have a somewhat stable life. I had a job, finally, I had my ducks in a row to start moving forward with my life - then BOOM. This fucking shit happens and completely ruins everything. Now I am back to square one. I have to dig myself out of this rut and start to build my life again. I am so fucking tired. I am so tired of fighting and trying to have this life that I want and something always popping up and pushing my back to the beginning.   


I just needed to vent. I hope that this quarantine is a time for everyone to work on their mental health and have a positive mindset. I hope that this quarantine didn't do to you what it did to me. I hope you all are having such a good day. <3",2.9731574675324666,4.463043767045459,4.263993506493507,86.88295454545454,74.39772727272727,7.755844155844157,26.20779220779221,8.418075326091056,1.6951814935064935,677,24,141,12,14,223,96,176,0.145,0.74,0.114,-0.8354,1,3,1,0,2,0,18.0,0,2,1,2,10,12,6,0,7,0,19,14,2,0,1,18,34,11,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,0,12,9,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,7,0,1,6,2,26,5,24,28,2,21,0,1,1,3,4,7,5,4,13,108,38,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062477551770987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859778653565448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329782181186905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25358895521640495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779908750122696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555532240783435,0.10868552078941876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247465235137598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353979355671273,0.0631817676534545,0.0,0.0,0.10143168518176844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069394109787098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854463155403134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3603370842534441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000594899953827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4270878132093351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702065698325604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24374121074861385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12853114825116296,0.0,0.08966924613093973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194637919818651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13699192408613106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482690909638101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309905080025263,0.0,0.0,0.17119201219045493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051618614602416,0.27798615973959234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821046155398657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132858856284469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17607928438340334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scarabson,2020/03/30,"I want to help Hey everyone, 
I want to help as many people as I can before Wednesday for personal reasons. Feel free to message me for someone to talk to about anything, i’m non-judgemental and I want to do something positive for the world before I’m gone :)",3.785,5.398029019607847,5.115833333333335,81.09375000000003,72.52941176470588,8.237254901960785,32.357843137254896,8.841846274778883,2.8811137254901964,204,10,38,4,4,68,33,51,0.0,0.6579999999999999,0.342,0.9451,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,6,9,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,2,12,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,1,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127949863715852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4400768136044072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24709086526489935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074930673918475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34665069773001433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621665306477452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17927159792542993,0.2257881076646361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658704016662033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21909984194801893,0.19907282969092932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2078423558093344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4575637616391366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rentalapple099,2020/03/30,"My depression makes me feel at home I just want to start off by saying I’m not condoning not getting help or saying depression is good, this is just an experience I’ve had, I’m in mobile so sorry for formatting.

My whole life I’ve struggled with depression. I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder in my early teens (I’m 21 now) and in later teens PTSD and anxiety (feel like this is necessary to the story) 

I’ve always tried to battle it but sometimes it gets to hard and I lean back and let my mental health problems consume me until I find myself realising I shouldn’t not try to be “normal”. It’s a cycle I always find myself in and when things get dark they get pretty bad but since I finished high school it hasn’t gotten as bad as then. This time I tried to stay normal but things changed in my life and put me into a bad place.

The only thing is I’ve been in denial about being depressed for a few years and rather than let myself fall back into it I pretended I was happy even when I wasn’t to myself, I stopped saying it was okay to be sad which only made things so much worse and I’m more depressed than ever. I’ve started back with coping mechanisms that I thought I got rid of and I just need to say, I feel so at home and safe now that I’m back in a unhealthy way of living. 

I felt like I was fighting a battle constantly that just wasn’t necessary pretending to be happy, my sleeping patterns are horrible, I’m binge eating, I’m hurting myself and I feel relief because I don’t feel like I’m pretending to be someone I’m not. I’ve stopped trying and it feels freeing. Does anyone else feel this or am I just weird? Is there any way I can try to improve my way of living without pushing myself too far?",1.9141375310687685,3.9904888056338015,3.6724813587406793,87.32960024855015,79.25352112676056,6.3173156586578285,22.553852526926264,7.39963492309942,0.9535252692626348,1366,43,274,19,34,457,172,355,0.20800000000000002,0.672,0.12,-0.986,0,0,0,0,2,1,22.0,0,0,1,0,23,27,3,1,8,1,26,6,1,2,1,56,56,26,0,7,16,0,9,3,0,1,4,4,2,0,19,17,1,3,11,3,1,3,10,17,0,0,13,13,39,11,40,35,5,43,0,8,0,0,7,15,0,2,24,179,58,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262542229436971,0.0,0.0,0.0515919081492269,0.0,0.05803776223709795,0.0,0.0,0.05304770980304857,0.07773432518371305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23334701374002606,0.19003639456153126,0.04624759184042752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025683213962692,0.0,0.0,0.08198487201045211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3920628896088858,0.07700302974106894,0.0,0.0,0.08694972767516232,0.0,0.06639139681634851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776304998637906,0.06337683212565108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050109191823948566,0.06862570784950668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421211917492572,0.0,0.0,0.2685231241400112,0.10839826742020556,0.0728438596948124,0.0,0.13868144584548192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15854872596246786,0.0,0.0,0.06363332752101401,0.0606774724091933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16152287101428536,0.06796159634671423,0.0,0.0,0.08064267714854048,0.0,0.0,0.0508518010869343,0.08015725712132768,0.1522008259599618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08121679364771629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515753309424996,0.10717368502546827,0.11119380579888696,0.0,0.1339832437139488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178683714031321,0.050641562844347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645571630866907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05577070039986703,0.056254142848827536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866637350988973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11539997750289145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792644781518635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718363452050242,0.0,0.07259411632514802,0.08868402743346777,0.07626691495098355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413287484057713,0.0,0.0767810771650194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06275765809604952,0.0,0.07592141728228087,0.0,0.06428154712440216,0.0,0.07503403431556993,0.08492647798280288,0.1073975785887334,0.08086373033794249,0.0,0.12685579502998093,0.0,0.07931227127663433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20160966435295835,0.0,0.0,0.06022962770071246,0.044238440488508037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575422996410144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04474810242477345,0.1806581923767831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470238003967417,0.0,0.07313272142123968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07731457469757227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04885562060343165
mentalhealth,nefaris7,2020/03/30,"Overwhelming loneliness and no motivation Hi. This is sort of a cry for help and a place for me to vent I guess? Please bear with me.

These past few days, my mental health has been in shambles, i’ve lost all motivation to do anything. I’m supposed to be studying to finish my portions from school(high school student here) and study for college entrance tests and the like but i cant help but cry every time i try to do something. I recently experienced a death in the family and i’m still not over it. I’ve lost most of my friends. My best friend, who i’d thought would never leave me has stopped talking to me and doesn’t reflect that he cares about me. I feel really alone and I just wanna get back on my feet? but i’m not able to. My escapism is reading books, watching shows and playing minecraft and that’s how i’m keeping myself together at the moment but I don’t know what to do further. Can someone give me some tips? I really don’t know what to do.",1.7536153846153832,4.020639374358975,2.9171153846153857,91.51413461538462,80.8974358974359,5.951282051282053,25.134615384615394,7.1686216300943375,1.0598153846153844,758,30,160,10,20,243,122,195,0.121,0.715,0.165,0.8512,0,1,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,5,6,9,0,1,6,0,16,2,1,3,2,35,31,14,1,2,7,0,1,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,8,10,0,2,7,4,0,0,8,3,0,0,4,3,21,6,23,25,6,17,0,3,1,0,9,7,0,4,11,101,29,8,0.14539823334848376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505887199361607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11965035731342948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180226654765543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258647554109478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482431891830594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3194262639165014,0.09376983201404183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250428257048092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13706851428956274,0.0,0.07351771550908888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246686288182525,0.0,0.0759645758338087,0.13947923425844358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017254637512604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154551522921523,0.0,0.0,0.19491474190053715,0.15362121644962656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923663044541078,0.0,0.0,0.15981413311204862,0.0,0.0,0.15395573526848227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103423246561984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174386947497554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14652722118581835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214008107511253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879906588416016,0.0,0.0,0.15191020741270128,0.15960359794662105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454375801753624,0.0,0.1862916628351709,0.0,0.14356321445805792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943015491797445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231954512810691,0.11193466354663978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11611521697065387,0.12155943358124835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686559237831985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542995613842827,0.08478287912712015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987158562529205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328673329164983,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZealousidealBell0,2020/03/30,Is it possible to have clinical depression if it doesn’t run in your family? I don’t think it’s possible since it’s a hereditary condition that is genetic,3.0324731182795683,5.4243326774193585,6.330322580645162,68.08215053763442,77.06451612903227,14.455913978494625,32.913978494623656,12.45797560212912,6.348862365591398,127,7,23,8,3,47,24,31,0.134,0.866,0.0,-0.5719,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,6,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,16,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082154186778174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33734884544496674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8068435283439127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960169663281718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22929563576661716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,poviliukazz,2020/03/30,"Free Online trainings for people who suffer mental Health  Guys! The world is in quite of a bad state, but we want to bring positivity and warmth through learning. We are offering FREE classes/training to everybody all ages! Tune it! 

https://www.facebook.com/ifacharity/photos/a.817353168299190/4055599971141144/?type=3&theater",14.618571428571437,20.43589323809524,7.6336190476190495,55.29471428571429,57.0952380952381,7.1695238095238105,29.82857142857143,8.238735603445708,2.815908571428572,284,9,30,4,5,71,39,42,0.083,0.588,0.32899999999999996,0.9417,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,7,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,6,4,1,5,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,17,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4107934592095646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165625397731096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754040298248916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40300360493282944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3820796925350217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26284501219305445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4032575707567919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236241061029008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,twistingtablespoons,2020/03/30,"Hi Guys! Interested in doing a survey? Hello random strangers on the internet, would you like to complete a survey to help my grade in an English project? It's about mental health and I have made a survey based on it. You might see the same one on other subreddits so if you answer on this one, please do not answer on another one. Please answer the question below by commenting 1, 2 or 3 or comment something else if you really want to.
You are struggling with a mental illness you have had for quite a long time now. What do you do?
1.Talk to a therapist
2.Speak to one of your close friends or family
3. Keep it to yourself

Thank you!",3.1294981818181853,5.161958168000002,4.32341818181818,84.30570909090909,75.32,7.105454545454546,25.763636363636365,8.00094639256281,1.64588,501,18,95,8,11,164,83,125,0.042,0.8,0.159,0.9234,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,9,0,1,3,5,0,1,10,0,10,2,0,1,0,20,15,7,0,4,6,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,1,6,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,2,1,11,4,19,11,1,12,0,0,1,0,17,9,0,8,4,70,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17438970642894275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17437204149676605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389300038081298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15678152112745655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284900823442708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16467226403055885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767789122235086,0.0,0.0,0.11147355716125523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478232664272873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125027892659713,0.0,0.0,0.14717841654081829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15736579476714976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352011327059547,0.17642778914830898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4507816966038439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3651151395808432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18630437575762812,0.1768903152024212,0.0,0.0,0.10654193789158688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252690746641302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280329542396489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.173862494872704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367304253278434,0.0,0.15311517532257746,0.0,0.1930978099582681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09697623720524524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809348040550224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814129044648032,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Martin7431,2020/03/30,"i don't cry anymore it's weird. i'm so tired, all the time. i hate feeling like this. i can't even cry anymore but i always feel like i want to. i used to be so happy and now i have to pretend to smile at my parents. and now im feeling some type of way typing this because it sounds so stupid. sorry i dont know",-2.5226893939393946,-0.8032441527777756,0.5655050505050525,102.66636363636364,101.63888888888887,2.6181818181818186,16.267676767676768,3.1291,-1.2900444444444448,239,7,61,0,11,83,48,72,0.18899999999999997,0.53,0.282,0.7617,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,2,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,1,11,13,6,0,1,1,1,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,4,9,3,6,12,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,5,36,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620073813883973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3861834649017327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186883270103103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4277412700846824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281888997446567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859861257087665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953410338274709,0.2781898148407783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072635414264897,0.0,0.1922275836521813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21031120772369155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700294245794917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19024279620461834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21619315610359724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21795257200496104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353210582818656,0.2237809206029076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16815972395703985,0.0,0.0,0.11484008577155085,0.15454511799512086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hawaiiandadshirt,2020/03/30,"I can't tell if this is abnormal to where I should seek help. To give some background about myself, I'm 18, female, I'm in community college, I'm a part time cashier, I'm married and I'm in a long distance relationship at the moment. I'm also not looking for a diagnosis because I know a subreddit isn't the place to look for or receive one. I'm looking for advice, I'm looking for someone who may be able to relate, and I'm looking for possible reasons as to why I am doing this. 

Recently I've noticed my mood swings have been almost way beyond severe. One small thing could easily make my mood shift from me being super happy and productive to being angry, petty, and mean. I've noticed this when I'm talking on the phone with my husband mainly. I love him, and I'm not here to get berated about being too young and not knowing what love is. I love him, I couldn't imagine not having him, I couldn't imagine not marrying him, and you get the idea. I'm extremely, extremely happy in this relationship and it's not like I'm trying to get out of it, if I was that would at least explain a little bit as to why I do this. 

I get really, really nit picky about things. He could be joking and I'll even *know* he's joking, but in my head, I'll take things the wrong way and boom, I've started something. I don't want arguments, I don't like them, and I grew up in a house that consistently had arguments. I don't understand why I feel so uptight about things. He doesn't try to irritate me or make me angry, he's even said and noticed I get upset over little things and it makes him feel like he's doing something wrong. He's not, and I hate that I'm doing this to him. 

I've never spoken to him about this because for one, I don't know how to. I don't *know* what's going on with me. If I get any comments or anything that could help though, that could make it easier and clear some things up. 

I go through cycles of being extremely, extremely productive. I'll get school work done in seconds, I'll get the work done and I'll actually be able to focus. I don't half ass it either, like it's nice thorough work. My room will look decent, my car won't have garbage everywhere, I'll actually do laundry and have clean clothes. I'll get so much done that when I'm done doing things I ""have"" to do, I'll pick up other hobbies or I'll start doing old hobbies. I'll be in the best mood I've ever been in as well. Bad things about having this go on is I'll have trouble sleeping. My heart and thoughts feel like they are constantly racing and I feel like I constantly need to be doing something. If I'm wide awake at 1 AM and I know I should be going to sleep soon, I'll feel bad for laying there because I should be doing something if I can't sleep. 

Then there's the other part of the ""cycle"". I don't get anything done. I feel guilty and sometimes I'll maybe clean my room, maybe do a load of laundry. That's the most that will get done because I feel a constant state of like, being numb? I feel anxious here too, but it's like dread. I don't enjoy anything, no hobbies, no shows, no music, nothing. Sometimes when I'm just tired or bored or a little sad I'll take a shower, and I normally just really enjoy showers, but here in this part of the cycle, I don't even want to shower. I dread showering. I dread getting up, I dread doing school work, I dread going to work. I dread everything and I don't know why. I cry a lot too, mainly because at this point of the cycle I'm also arguing and being difficult, which causes problems with my husband. 

He wants to know what's wrong. I'll randomly start crying and he'll ask me, ""What's wrong?"" ""Please, tell me what's wrong, I can' fix it or help you if I don't know what's wrong."" I wish I could tell him, but I don't even know. I've looked up symptoms that I've been experiencing for like, years, and the same couple of things come up. Bipolar disorder has come up, borderline personality disorder comes up. It's all so scary because I'm scared if I get diagnosed with something, he won't understand. I know he'll try to, I know getting some type of diagnosis and help would not only help me, but it would help us. I'm just terrified of it. 

Something else I should mention is I do believe mental health issues run in my family. I've never been told specifically what though. My grandpa was talking about his family, which his parents, his siblings (except for one who doesn't speak to us and I've never met) are deceased. He's told me some of his family have either attempted suicide or went through completely with it. He's told me that some of my family have ""gone crazy"" and ""it runs in the family."" I thought he was joking, but when I laughed because I didn't know how to react and he he had this serious look on his face and said, ""I'm serious."" He wasn't joking, but he never told me anything specifically. 

​

Literally any advice would help. Thanks so much.",2.783441510365254,4.186288345508395,4.398325641658442,86.08206891658442,74.72556762092793,7.355227048371174,25.100802073050342,7.993328176185818,1.3582904343534057,3846,126,807,58,80,1292,318,1013,0.163,0.731,0.106,-0.9966,5,0,6,0,0,1,142.0,2,2,2,8,41,56,2,9,25,0,99,16,7,10,7,157,209,71,1,29,36,4,8,9,0,15,6,4,8,1,56,40,0,1,31,5,0,15,38,27,1,6,28,21,99,26,93,146,21,82,0,1,8,4,76,40,1,25,33,500,155,9,0.07417245545131028,0.0,0.0723816170151486,0.0,0.0,0.07248046502728071,0.0,0.0,0.03713649997274777,0.0,0.0,0.05931568582664276,0.0,0.040182912246285056,0.0450638259765798,0.050439813188766176,0.0,0.0,0.041896881154958064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12207522186728482,0.0,0.03467061665074238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619309021163101,0.15825194139747076,0.0,0.0,0.04178347880097475,0.0389197079596508,0.0,0.040488555427646976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038097771745840975,0.0,0.09583950403988743,0.03888420417533972,0.12023111114298095,0.0,0.14805167552560147,0.04103520558711245,0.08147495944307583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0376417404825792,0.0,0.0,0.0850080599473815,0.0,0.0,0.2277125221595394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030980784463983214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798041457700532,0.03354661620446221,0.0,0.0,0.033330710146050505,0.0,0.1748079745500205,0.0,0.15001528843642892,0.07948322549216014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712643263267497,0.035576488968134916,0.10538478934471568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895795805912457,0.0,0.036614971893643315,0.038061169023480064,0.03942092584217897,0.0,0.043947358418125866,0.17400681690264147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04279252750315793,0.0,0.04186583695111104,0.0,0.03870838644112755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26496107130188273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16306611812131186,0.11151042924813563,0.0,0.03282014450167755,0.2491447270753749,0.0,0.0,0.031529384596298234,0.10041530539621916,0.0,0.09902137994461063,0.0,0.07451620095645438,0.04039777419344644,0.0,0.0,0.03737419477360773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05452528914881963,0.027498967940688072,0.1144127404617718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036336629019421834,0.03558523572385903,0.1266687482145621,0.03891575742308009,0.0,0.1005223508240855,0.028205747354785943,0.0,0.0,0.04117986703018845,0.12048231180112635,0.0,0.0,0.032382263567553894,0.03874721457210673,0.04070954125760028,0.035058472528905864,0.04180914945256582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035486511328995066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127516138456741,0.038130818804478925,0.03661817576323477,0.07963345888815161,0.0,0.0,0.0705549904555865,0.0,0.03712978369811697,0.07506648479513263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041896881154958064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11133903286736632,0.0,0.031423040402589766,0.17130473983418154,0.07335845502612083,0.0,0.07874946859795574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04056631379353447,0.0,0.0,0.0385467906699351,0.055768455623409936,0.05961701008908653,0.0972449930216344,0.034144015797948096,0.0,0.0,0.22174597612864488,0.0,0.07287406088678643,0.05888464448466803,0.021625277626372626,0.042625163166150566,0.0,0.14174991954894933,0.0,0.07553734266538853,0.0,0.0,0.07721614195694966,0.0892203312943643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562325395085733,0.05887464269363121,0.0,0.0,0.033344972602263045,0.0343793046526986,0.13385820851474314,0.0,0.04264733162335494,0.0,0.0,0.13499607739558686,0.0,0.0,0.10537996848179934,0.2432878087466452,0.0450638259765798,0.02388231473558373
mentalhealth,Scarriot212,2020/03/30,"Lock down is ruining my life The lock down is hitting me hard, I'm in the UK and I work from home but its getting difficult to keep my head in the right place with the lock down, keeping busy was my main cure for the depression and anxiety I have on a daily basis. If I'm focused I can't let my mind wonder into the abyss, in my work life I have to concentrate and focus on problems and solve issues and that keeps my mind occupied but at home I have the time to think about all the problems that are in my life. 

You are allowed out for exercise once a day here in the UK and I try and make that exercise last as long as possible if I can but the world lacks the compassion for the mental toll a lock down would take on an already emotionally strained population. Corona virus will kill a lot of people, but it won't be the virus that kills them.",4.4198295454545455,4.633289960227274,5.332954545454548,85.32568181818183,69.85227272727272,9.127272727272727,27.93181818181818,9.095868883498916,1.935881818181818,667,21,147,12,11,219,102,176,0.182,0.768,0.05,-0.9786,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,2,2,8,2,1,18,0,15,6,1,2,1,31,26,15,2,6,6,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,2,0,6,10,0,3,2,2,0,0,2,8,0,0,1,1,17,0,27,19,4,22,0,2,0,0,2,18,0,4,4,101,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550310212399776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747225595204063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060256486442987,0.0,0.12100134348509108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802909166079387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339871749317949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12584885763935616,0.0,0.1441803071794006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28184005539113144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466320449605157,0.0,0.3746141997258967,0.31085634848915955,0.0,0.0,0.11451574663427172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14365759004861875,0.29769060516132473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243266730195541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943711853588496,0.0,0.0,0.09377623798768908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141577965714013,0.0,0.28370386897013794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14961418900127316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739607430446363,0.0,0.1467791306122551,0.0,0.0,0.1583781099120125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688543854753085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997522581862292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10562882419275764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001846858294643,0.0,0.0,0.08191916462383901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538152705620324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523522799045915,0.2045525810823371,0.0,0.0,0.099798013408944,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Iluvlampp,2020/03/30,How long has it taken for Viibryd to work on you? I started it a while ago but my doc told me to go back down to 10mg. I think I'm seeing some changes finally but I really hope when I up my does to 20mg again that it won't be super irritating like last time.,1.7699999999999996,1.826214,4.420000000000002,90.09000000000002,75.66666666666666,8.0,23.333333333333336,8.07648339933343,0.8473333333333337,200,5,52,3,4,72,48,60,0.068,0.758,0.174,0.7608,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,2,4,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,6,11,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,8,3,8,7,1,14,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,2,11,32,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264900839982506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297870943637229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161297668158428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26151414446082205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32736116615068755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698358706309836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2968124241500624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24359192095359014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459965918640342,0.0,0.0,0.2644612116386318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19144254060732172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381342818263586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21151826312291488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19148258931979828,0.0,0.0,0.17425417254942244,0.0,0.0,0.2855514200408046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21755678859168093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Atinybitofadvice,2020/03/30,"My girlfriend is having panic attacks, how can I help her? My girlfriend has  panic attacks for a while now, but it feels like it is getting worse and is happening around ones a week. Is there a good way to manage them until the Corona-Crisis is over and she can actually get regular appointments at a therapist?


Happy about any help!",6.256904761904764,7.05334512698413,6.847738095238098,74.02017857142856,65.98412698412699,9.474603174603176,31.62301587301588,9.516144504307137,3.0171301587301587,265,10,45,5,4,87,48,63,0.159,0.606,0.235,0.8339,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,5,7,2,2,5,0,9,0,0,1,0,6,13,6,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,1,6,3,7,13,0,8,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,5,37,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.20120877184311248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140214232317905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18355014662315008,0.0,0.4691349634815582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10425434381241756,0.1473000359567322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21544839775559307,0.0,0.0,0.17293987542359382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18233048558139056,0.21948989845020286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764056034044612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10073255463176596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971764921930166,0.0,0.0,0.4838320444915907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393990020448813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636616455613083,0.16539077659105458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101221708421704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gashtart,2020/03/30,"Mental health relapse due to the pandemic I literally just got off medication last week. I've been stable since end of August and I've been doing therapy approximately once per week since then. (twice a month before that) 

But I'm currently in isolation with my (relatively new, very kind) SO and this situation is making me relapse back into my old patterns. 
I must be incredibly difficult to deal with right now for him.

The old ways of thinking are back and I feel like I never learned anything in the past 7 months, even though I've made so much progress in that time. 


I'm afraid. I'm afraid of my mental health detoriating, of going back on meds, of loosing my SO because all my bad sides are showing up so quickly that I must look like a liar or an impostor to him, of being self destructive again and drinking and using horrible ways to cope....
I've worked so hard to dig myself out of my misery and I most of all just feel very angry at all of this happening right now. 

I was incredibly emotionally unstable just a few months back and I feel like I'm grasping at straws not to lose myself again.",4.479261627906976,5.9543262139534905,5.566904069767443,79.08430959302326,70.5813953488372,8.909883720930234,28.32122093023256,9.354420925462401,2.441796511627907,876,32,169,19,16,290,125,215,0.141,0.7929999999999999,0.067,-0.9565,1,1,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,19,11,2,2,7,0,11,4,0,3,6,33,26,16,0,2,6,0,4,3,0,2,3,0,0,1,5,11,1,0,6,2,0,1,2,7,0,1,5,5,19,4,28,17,6,42,0,1,1,0,4,13,0,2,29,108,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456408112039462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3534457845557916,0.09594803535074213,0.0700502488541258,0.0,0.09778298871248432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847085019549634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257155564334233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292623051583019,0.10177931947314844,0.0,0.0,0.07589933264543086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17431126916678094,0.1641885621707926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06530803297189072,0.0,0.0919068836442155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161769504355213,0.0,0.10293999205488076,0.0,0.0,0.2442955136781869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966480519589393,0.0,0.09366990110051013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16842290500497906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649846144653314,0.12855889689729869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10873400335049864,0.07670570376612207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12764307663869762,0.11576333749513128,0.2316117116853193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27516875816124153,0.0,0.08447469989917346,0.0,0.08862843339327275,0.11098424700226686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24116493326179006,0.12237920721715087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969801027273264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19627113069144506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198799206555979,0.0,0.0,0.19011539378305373,0.12916767321753422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13141368806130202,0.0,0.0,0.07363197898288404,0.11290200418824638,0.0,0.06700702981099857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924843333084016,0.0,0.18963146853025492,0.0,0.1824260944179964,0.1843534770946872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365845136140586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,murcockpickles,2020/03/30,"Lockdown is ruining me and my familial relationships. I want to hurt myself all the time out of anger. I need to see a doctor to be diagnosed with something but I can't. I don't know what to do anymore, I won't last months of this.   About a week before things with the coronavirus got really serious (in the UK), I left university for a break because of my mental health. I was going to take some time off and see a doctor because my mental health had deteriorated so badly. I was having daily breakdowns and constant debilitating migraines due to stress. I wanted to know if I could be diagnosed with anything because knowing would have helped me put my mind at ease, at least a little. I struggle a lot with the symptoms associated with depression and anxiety, though I have not been able to get diagnosed with either yet as I haven't been able to see a doctor. I also suffer a LOT with sensory issues i.e. sounds and smells, which is partly why I took a break from uni. Obviously, I can't be certain, but I think I may have high-functioning autism to some degree. Ever since going to university, I've become more aware of how I function differently to some people. My Mom brought it to my attention and when I looked into the symptoms of it I really believe I might have it. But unfortunately, that's when this lockdown happened. I really don't know what to do. I need to see a doctor so badly, but I can't because of this virus. I keep lashing out at people and pushing people away out of anger. When I left university I left most of my belongings behind because I didn’t think I’d be home long. All of my housemates have left with all their belongings. I’m attached to all my belongings to a ridiculous degree. I know I’m overacting but ever since this lockdown happened, I haven’t been able to think of much else. I want my things so badly; I verbally lash out at people because I’m so frustrated and scared. I barely have any clothes; I have no books or anything to draw with. Then even when I try and distract myself with the things I do still have with me, like videogames on my laptop, I just feel numb and hollow. I can’t think of anything but my belongings, the virus, the thought of being confined to my house for 6 months. I won’t be able to do it. I know I won’t. I’ve had a non-stop headache for weeks now, it’s so painful and painkillers don’t help. I argued with my parents today and all I could think about after that was hurting myself, feeling pain in some way. So I scratched my arm so hard until it bled. I feel so stupid, I know what I’m doing isn’t helping anyone, but I can’t distract my mind no matter how hard I try. I don’t know what to do. I want my things and I want to see a doctor, but I can’t do either. I regret so much, I regret not seeing one when I had the chance, I’m an idiot and now I’m suffering the consequences. By the end of this, I’m going to have either destroyed myself of destroyed the relationships I have with my family.",3.4450391304347825,4.8426572633333365,4.895956521739134,83.19286956521744,73.03333333333333,7.6173913043478265,26.3768115942029,8.18289091462,1.640152898550725,2338,80,469,36,46,783,234,600,0.218,0.743,0.039,-0.9989,2,3,1,0,0,3,66.0,0,0,1,0,29,31,9,5,26,0,57,17,1,2,9,103,106,45,0,13,16,2,6,1,0,6,16,1,1,0,22,32,0,2,18,1,0,7,21,29,0,1,14,15,83,2,76,78,20,55,0,8,7,0,9,19,0,11,27,340,105,7,0.2351109909790029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04700454363566179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039970884041284314,0.0,0.044964816142963965,0.0,0.05829173171082561,0.04109876787383621,0.0,0.14510723461575098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05522362885133186,0.0,0.1472308926561101,0.21498221681921745,0.06491540445096873,0.050015534145101695,0.06622239379614467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06351786413463799,0.0,0.09385849757063974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050625188004676316,0.1789745300971557,0.0,0.061410236187368565,0.0,0.3008075772158984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049101266044882685,0.0,0.05205963834202729,0.0,0.0,0.038822148039266376,0.10633567584938376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082085897632668,0.0,0.08915938600037954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030708947234558377,0.0,0.10021424573121047,0.0,0.04700993432091999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395393642838033,0.0,0.10530663370611508,0.0,0.0,0.12495599456254425,0.0,0.0,0.11819245599467702,0.062101917614613575,0.05895887343260136,0.0,0.0,0.06782162924596807,0.1258455892620994,0.0,0.0,0.0613486977072358,0.0,0.05224436286990925,0.0,0.0,0.2584217039169125,0.04791170937345995,0.0,0.0,0.25544877962416185,0.0,0.0,0.0287158385693668,0.05891074470862311,0.0,0.05201645712624962,0.04935850455154528,0.0,0.0,0.09994147844087363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846829010579775,0.062353901786725924,0.11869753913961245,0.06883978776844395,0.09383167495487328,0.0,0.08641681529345402,0.08716591036519059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03982932305191103,0.0,0.12508733547952336,0.0,0.0652657329930699,0.06365057295786125,0.0,0.16299635791030434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059087871006336036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129635908866084,0.0,0.0,0.12621060823966745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058846779353494465,0.0,0.2810295298314722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09724312065388696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04524998183484839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046939985275269935,0.04914082900793309,0.067329711452332,0.06144726396007005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218517100890353,0.04419355132309037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15619729536161972,0.18831203706701888,0.05774883872829197,0.04666296617119749,0.06854755477618088,0.0,0.055714432160373306,0.0,0.06530424045823281,0.07981246489198475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17334319249393132,0.0466550402808251,0.09429592764349952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05303777504580933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04175402558190195,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Laserangel2002,2020/03/30,"Writing issues Ever since I was a kid I've never been able to write a full paragraph without massive amount of struggle, because whenever my brain comes up with an idea or sentence to write I delete it right after because I think it sounds stupid and then proceed to sit there for a few hours not being able to write anything else. I've struggled with this for years, and I was just wondering if this was a mental disorder or if it was just me, and it there was anything I could do about it",9.611938775510202,6.4509574387755135,8.654795918367348,76.64913265306124,61.3469387755102,11.024489795918367,39.80612244897959,8.07648339933343,3.2296653061224485,391,15,77,3,4,122,63,98,0.115,0.871,0.013999999999999999,-0.8591,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,6,3,1,2,5,0,9,1,1,0,2,24,12,8,0,3,8,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,7,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,6,1,7,0,13,4,3,12,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,5,7,58,14,0,0.3827081925450669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31493623361326445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332953620064553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21361445603935295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648346102891624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527806752490914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193083724697587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598517934143686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17309073530726682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18844523948106087,0.0,0.0,0.2160154829910399,0.0,0.1997239611535364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19283992207894515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475840756512229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634153526757247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582900858353091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40008969770534003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261197835167932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18445852031987275,0.2075153547883133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322576420902635
mentalhealth,zeshocka,2020/03/30,Soon to be wife left lost job and lost Honestly just looking to talk as the title says I was left then lost my job for calling out. Cant get ahold of my psychologist do to covid-19 lockdown in my city. Just could use an ear of someone who may understand my point as being a manic depressed person. Willing to listen( granted I give bad advice) but i am a good ear.,1.3985135135135138,3.72540067567568,3.006689189189192,89.98138513513516,82.7837837837838,5.321621621621622,24.114864864864863,6.6274283507984215,0.8210594594594598,286,11,58,3,8,94,57,74,0.122,0.782,0.096,-0.0,2,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,3,7,0,0,4,0,9,2,2,1,0,9,18,5,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,4,5,7,2,11,9,0,7,0,4,1,0,8,5,0,1,2,38,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17398926155499905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866504957709686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18180985816773992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215914142926214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335496407287558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302423725194896,0.17080263052825487,0.0,0.14934063255347885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3533760540733453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3869056092997093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495178979185993,0.0,0.5830907129255877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546716273074196,0.0,0.0,0.1683156349577687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14159320808877815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086193482345028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14311055479035534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853572478344196,0.0,0.15377879502839056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bettermeproject19,2020/03/30,"I'm scared. TW: COVID-19, suicidal thoughts

I knew the shelter in place was going to be extended. Of course I did. I'd read all the articles, I didn't believe anyone who said we might be over this by Easter. Logically, I knew. But hearing Trump say it yesterday, that April 30th is the earliest...it sent me into a spiral. And I know that's not gonna be it. Most scientists and doctors are saying two more months minimum. 

To be clear - I want to stay home, of course I do. I'm not going to do a single damn thing to be reckless and risk contributing to the curve not being flattened. But my area was the first in the US to be put under a mandatory shelter in place, it's already been weeks and I can feel my mental health falling apart.  I no longer have a car and you couldn't pay me enough to get on public transit right now and risk infecting myself or infecting others, so I'm basically confined to the radius that I can go on walks around my neighborhood, and will continue to be for....another two months? three? six?

I'm out of work, so it's not like I have a set routine for 40 hours a week. I'm trying. I'm trying. I'm trying. But I woke up in a cold sweat at 1am this morning and had the ""am I going to hurt myself before this is over?"" thought for the first time in a long while, and I'm scared.",1.972381713554988,3.53060066911765,3.7721739130434817,89.08152173913048,77.23529411764707,7.083375959079285,23.59079283887468,7.893859768569023,1.097542327365729,1010,32,222,16,23,340,153,272,0.11900000000000001,0.855,0.025,-0.9748,0,0,0,0,0,2,42.0,2,1,0,3,4,7,1,4,17,0,27,5,1,0,2,35,52,16,1,2,8,0,1,1,0,3,4,4,1,0,13,13,0,1,7,1,1,9,7,6,0,6,13,6,23,1,32,27,5,45,0,1,0,0,10,20,1,3,15,145,36,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14142747699688818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438667800967607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961228085031997,0.0,0.0,0.11408935376716665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905451244787563,0.14439215719696671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311769402631451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242328660787447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480142310863493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180252449745572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695818260655892,0.0,0.2913445697848677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362278269879502,0.1444453587222959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855468419101246,0.0,0.12621154326896808,0.0,0.13719766883703205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043324991003867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06261238289746213,0.0,0.0,0.11341735059175673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12915488996418667,0.13595724757925184,0.0,0.0,0.2045917881169604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677993339946465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12883595215607668,0.0,0.0,0.12819443726695415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094477308731312,0.12190927569027435,0.2038355629270858,0.2566205456450795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366012470764912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14018597125620047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851436467814195,0.0,0.0,0.2034890604350381,0.07473098401711824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610361839026069,0.0,0.25038691740325364,0.0,0.15416040587219798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559194424972585,0.0,0.20560405063651827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330182831891312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,onedaywemight,2020/03/30,"Outside Opinion Hi all, i just would like to share what is going on inside my head and how i see my life,im glad with all the answers you may give me,since all i want is some ""out of the box"" Point of View.  
Im a 21 yo male, i have  been nationally top level on every sport i went through ( football,swimming) until my 16-17,i could had been making a living out of it, but sadly my parents , specially my father never invested in me and always wanted me to go for traditional job ( he is a renowned teacher and programmer in my country) and he always made me believe we were poor.I remember being 7/8 yo and saving 11 euros all year long,to buy some pair of the cheapest football shoos in the market,same thing happened when i was a  bit younger and managed to save up around a 5-6 euros and asked my dad for a playing gun in some national fair , he asked me "" do you really wanna buy it? you will spend all your money.""And with tears in my eyes i went for it.

Ive always been an extreme reader of books,not only fantasy and fiction but when i got into my 14/15 i started to go heavy on economics and philosophy books (ive read mein kampf,and several from Karl Marx,etc) ive always slept less than normal (5-6h) so i could invest time on something else to grow as person.Ive done crossfit ( competition aswell) for some years and eventually dropped it 3 years ago due to severe injuries.(i always give it all, im not saying injuries in sports are a synonym of ""hard work"",most of the times it means stupid work,but my point is ive always looked to pushed myself to beyond my limits)always had the mental ""we do what others dont,so we can have what they wont"".

Ive developed tons of interest by stock market,but never really had the financial back up to try it,but im trying to solve that so in near future i might go for it. Im on university studying computer science mainly because of my dad,ive always been interested on programming when i was back in high school etc, but all this intense work on university completely burned me off and i hate it,i wont give up on the masters since its only 2 more years, wont throw away all the money invested by my parents. Im also into a some pro gaming ,but never really had the shot to go full time on it,neither i have the pc hardware to play the game at his highest ( im top 1000-1200 Europe).  


Even tho i completely hate my dad,and i got perma punched and kicked my him when i was a kid for no reason and brutal beatings.I could take the beatings even tho one of those made me not walk straight for 3 days.(to give an example back when i was 10 i was helping to do some heavy work at the farm,moving around wood/metal etc, and i was completely tired and destroyed and i was denied to have dinner by my dad just because i couldnt move the last sets of wood and beg him to help me).I have a little brother 4 years younger than me which treats my dad like garbage,like i never did for 2 main reasons:i would legit be smashed if i talked like he does, and 2nd one, even tho i have no love for my dad , its still my dad,im grateful for everything he did for me, all the meals i was given all the cheap clothes etc. It grinds my gears all this unfairness not only by my dad but all around the world i live in.

Since young age ive always had the idea to repay the money invested in me by my parents, even tho it wasnt much ( to give an example what im saying is not something only tough by myself,all this outrage towards my dad comes also from people telling me its disgusting how im treated from my dad compared to my brother) when my dad needs some help,its me he calls no one else,me. Im not a suicidal person since im not someone of imploding but more like of exploding,i have several episodes where i had to take actions and i completely destroyed the situation.(i have some background on martial arts etc, and im a really cold person,can evaluate clutch situations pretty well)I never throw the first rock,but if it comes to the point where i have to make a move, ill make sure you will remember it with injuries for a while. To give an example one time me and some friends were at a university party and out of nowhere some guys start to harass a friend of mine for no reason and i went completely off and i remember it clear as water holding one of them in execution stance thinking to myself "" you took the choice for us to fight when u came at us for no reason, why should i not take the choice to let u live or not?""thankfully i let him go,but sometimes you have to burn a village to save the others since they will fear you.(im no dictator,but im worse than an eye for an eye,im more like an eye for half of your face).

Most recent years im dealing with mental riot of myself where i have to hold myself really hard to just not go outside and start to break everyone and inflict pain on those who deserve it,all this people getting rich out of scams, etc it grinds me .Ive told everyone around me that ill never live a normal life like a 9 to 5 job,if you see a Ferrari you should say "" im not buying it because i dont want it,besides from im not buying it because i cant afford it"".Money for me is not something to showoff,i gave the Ferrari example to make a point,i want all the money in the world so i can provide financial freedom to those around,it hurts to much watching people count every penny to go through the month.  


P.S: Sorry for the long post,been around for a while but just decided to create an account and share what is inside this war-zone mind of mine. Every comment/answer will show me another perspective of the way i should see my life, or even trick my mind to deal with all this riot inside myself.  
Thank you all,  
Stay Safe.",5.7886013817480695,5.173956766923741,6.466050637317911,81.18160808965298,67.02056555269922,9.350305269922881,30.745086225364183,8.660442795831766,2.188174817909169,4485,146,929,60,64,1478,444,1167,0.11,0.785,0.105,-0.9403,6,0,3,1,1,0,132.0,5,11,3,7,41,42,11,1,62,0,79,16,6,11,23,156,136,61,1,19,26,14,2,6,2,14,6,3,0,4,39,49,3,3,11,11,17,22,30,16,0,7,37,15,120,26,151,77,42,134,0,2,9,1,77,64,0,18,49,589,159,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02748165510740356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0495850322738111,0.2321674621688993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03250859899197564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559163925177556,0.05796590300260196,0.0,0.02912766731759913,0.07151653059144622,0.0,0.07559482080358443,0.0,0.0,0.034928958773462096,0.0,0.0,0.033846465730285824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03165679927791383,0.03545835497025158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053411446845193236,0.16252653004895792,0.0,0.0,0.07425840575038592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06392398911834392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027130308549624237,0.031726101348164414,0.07266889432212628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02589843101543618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20745445734792226,0.1023835843608331,0.0,0.078362286763664,0.059248023837968664,0.02786285474522178,0.0,0.0,0.03488618980596263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026370527808176072,0.0,0.0,0.047904577017885086,0.0,0.016197414355546277,0.17844130055205326,0.14095450423953454,0.0,0.04959071890071631,0.0,0.0,0.030697136351057662,0.02741521826456072,0.0,0.055543915833303925,0.0612166760865639,0.031817288599241614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06234053446453109,0.032755616276741416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033188587328096715,0.03499780618668183,0.6362679691534856,0.0,0.061529968320530135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02527100011852951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06340387382253382,0.06569349228750983,0.0908769028757036,0.031072434191607868,0.10950234267533386,0.05487209333136812,0.02603411129938701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027980772648728662,0.05867022339673796,0.08277706397428891,0.0,0.0,0.033770577027913806,0.0,0.0,0.06248602298802525,0.03288852516533237,0.06260694024262678,0.0,0.024745728131127076,0.06590104529006181,0.0455804933299568,0.022987801520505332,0.14346524066785524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06075131384016608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050397534055992,0.09431453912420737,0.03298861709451568,0.0,0.10327310595501793,0.0,0.0,0.06447924266222628,0.08120999842043455,0.0,0.0,0.11722872070615037,0.0,0.029691619234700838,0.03154046939718881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0310106746876601,0.0,0.09930428824240352,0.0956265372993974,0.030611016322642293,0.0,0.10535863621086666,0.0,0.0,0.07396278418709558,0.0,0.031375967582392146,0.07411442186631134,0.0,0.0,0.10507127289966328,0.0,0.12822705272397453,0.034847867317463324,0.0,0.0,0.026268135498887357,0.07160122094988403,0.030662052620095286,0.03470451989554984,0.06583073073431779,0.033044310855676474,0.024758464871474845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033911467947293966,0.0,0.02921928674289677,0.0,0.06992958017958142,0.02491846236065675,0.027097363596406573,0.057085477532768075,0.0,0.0,0.02059654060153411,0.019865012429204874,0.0,0.0,0.07231072685681886,0.03563256602051612,0.0,0.029624011918984332,0.034444679389265216,0.04209703298256223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0745838633585191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314380380654043,0.024608170818464524,0.0,0.0,0.027874777465860458,0.08621828646156596,0.02797474014174164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902801309462926,0.0,0.03159397704389904,0.04404626757123483,0.0,0.0,0.11978673065315808
mentalhealth,odr45,2020/03/30,looking for some insight as to what i’m experiencing please? i’ve had depression and anxiety for pretty much as long as i can remember but it almost seems like im different now or as if there is 2 different versions of me? i find i can go from feeling suicidal to being so happy so quick? (usually a few hours - a few days) i wake up not knowing which “version” of me i’ll be if that makes sense and i just wondered if anybody on here has experienced this and could help me out and possibly give some insight as to what this could be?,2.1686238532110096,4.1410732477064265,4.358247706422016,83.23021559633028,77.99082568807339,8.029724770642202,28.33119266055045,8.841846274778883,2.4035350458715605,420,19,86,10,10,145,75,109,0.085,0.75,0.166,0.8592,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,2,0,10,1,1,1,0,26,19,16,1,5,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,8,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,4,8,2,16,13,7,10,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,9,7,65,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18944605913114776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14472952854293072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30210500716730104,0.0,0.0,0.1220116427393209,0.0,0.1629487279347088,0.0,0.0,0.3953257365869888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09565994784295596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17291586978209614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18148790644465315,0.10752081132241036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013958504748774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268098030176379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18631364971797448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043572364555675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397365813261557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242848374260937,0.0,0.0,0.16742684530099428,0.1588716179916389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628552915595712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907612671913724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076733716410756,0.0,0.2132828512440917,0.0,0.19247384125092615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143149400124006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17223110920498827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069427190850585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083656193176985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051680542825106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,johnnyblack0000,2020/03/30,"I am strong, but hopeless Disclaimer: English is not my 1st language so pleaxe ignore grammar errors. 

I am 27, during childhood I would always feel extremely sad or angry for the simplest reasons, I believe the fear of feeling sad made me want to  stay away from people, I'd also feel disconnected from them, things that I still experience today. Growing up wasn't a breeze, raised only by my mother who has Bipolar Disorder, we would fight every day (no exceptions). 

When I was 16 I already suspected I had depression or something, had already tried to kill myself twice but my mother wouldn't believe me.
 Fast forward to 20, I won a competition and got to continue my degree for 1 year abroad (Ireland) on a dorm with 5 other people with one shared living room and kitchen. One night I got drunk, got back home to find out that someone had eaten my ham, I knew who it was and ate this guys hams, which turned out not to be his but some girls. I confesses to my crime, explained why and bought her a fresh new pack, but that wasnt enough, they started hating me, avoiding me and doing parties in our own dorm without inviting me. That triggered my first depressive crysis, I stopped going to classes, rarely ate, would sleep for more than 12 hours and spent the rest of my time just on the computer gaming.

When I came back to my home country I was wrongly diagnosed with depression, took meds which just made me have short temper and ruined my relationship because my ex at the time read the side effects and guess what? Became sure that all my libido would be gone, which fun enough didn't, but sex became more of a obligation then something that I'd want because of her attitude, which is still a trauma for me today that makes me subconciously avoid sex like someone is always pressuring me into doing it.

Around two years ago I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder, I've gone through many, many meds (and personally I feel like my doctor just gave up and stuck with the three that I take daily) ,  they a little, and by little I mean I can mostly control my anger and sadness when they are at minir levels. But the meds make me extremely sleepy, fatigue being something that ruins my day, schddules and just makes me feel more worthless. 


Now, don't gst me wrong, I did accomplish many of my dreams I, I have a stable job, wife, house and cats. But I just can't be happy, I've lost all of my inspiration for anything in lack of better words, this quarantine is being like Ireland all over again, I'm on break from work(holidays) and today is my last day, I've been having insomnia for weeks now, I sleep more than 12 hours everyday, I've lost my will to do anything, I'm short tempered, the only thing I do is procastinate.  I've come a long way since my first diagnostic, many meds, 2 doctors, the current one having given up on me, and still.. I feel nothing, I'm at the point where I have to fake empathy to a point that's socially acceptable, the only things I feel are sadness, anger and the urge to smoke. Most of the time I eat once a day because I don't even feel motivsted enough to eat (yes that's a thing) and my wife doesn't notice sometimes because she's used to eat without me since I sleep and work at different times then her. 

My wife once asked me why I don't tell her when I'm feeling depressed, I explained that for me it only makes me feel worse seeing someone I love being affected and failing to help, making them worry. I told her that my condition isn't like a point of view but more like lenses, it affects the way I proccess everything, affects the way I see things, it's not something that words can change.

I've dealt with myseld and my issues my whole life and done fine, but now it's getting worse and I don't know what to do... No I would not kill myself, I would never leave my wife or my cats alone.. It's just that I don't want to believe that this is it, just thinking that I will have to cope with myself on this deteorating condition forever is insane. I'm tired of feeling sleepy all the time, I miss having inspiration, miss being focused on what I love to do, I miss the joy of doing small things, I miss being happy when there's nothing going on instead of feeling sad without any reason. 

I know there's is no magic, I mostly just wanted to tell my story, to blow off some steam and maybe find someone with similar conditions and situations that could givd me some tips..


Oh and I don't mind if you ask for more details about anything I told here really, it'd be actually great to know someone got interested on my life story or condition.",8.244880952380951,6.541690928571434,8.033125000000002,75.46604166666667,62.70535714285714,10.810119047619047,35.507440476190474,9.424239791934726,3.0952703869047618,3616,127,695,51,42,1162,375,896,0.201,0.6829999999999999,0.11599999999999999,-0.9984,3,5,5,0,1,3,105.0,2,1,5,12,32,60,8,4,31,1,72,26,3,16,6,147,149,49,2,14,30,7,12,5,0,9,11,0,6,3,47,41,8,5,30,4,2,9,24,38,0,8,37,15,116,22,88,92,23,98,1,21,3,4,45,37,0,12,54,464,163,11,0.0,0.0,0.04518231129475535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041042329144764175,0.0,0.0,0.047953038461263184,0.1021868326988161,0.03702624909747989,0.07705094230072625,0.0,0.0,0.03148572020250909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114303345999364,0.041216989632000656,0.08656886424447363,0.0,0.04350055717517664,0.07120398380554567,0.0,0.11289667616214065,0.0,0.0,0.1564933935450773,0.0,0.04094875980353012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052955088401094655,0.0,0.0,0.04897946696949022,0.039883518167869315,0.0,0.0,0.051929605514991165,0.03696693811030966,0.0,0.0,0.11943918144683785,0.0,0.15951315993594845,0.09398744633208972,0.0,0.04837384912899111,0.10612806912843543,0.09478042268199087,0.0,0.0473811744206309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212997457793336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352143432132342,0.0,0.030580842033972006,0.0,0.03900991107608917,0.0,0.04161162968157883,0.045290474878704134,0.0,0.05210059143189323,0.2809292362046297,0.03307686845539258,0.0,0.0,0.08463507859683014,0.07876584418183351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02418994084149491,0.0,0.052626935448636135,0.0,0.1481219817142936,0.05104612828132028,0.051004884562542235,0.045844472212388736,0.0,0.09857483674284226,0.0,0.04571185686003877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0310340446448646,0.0,0.09288574105274587,0.0,0.09119273093565264,0.05342420847913388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483253742600053,0.045945799155993804,0.0,0.10244861132423257,0.0,0.07633612871227337,0.03774083841124423,0.0,0.04902522113071497,0.0,0.0,0.06540639377057618,0.11309968246407227,0.09280991748400427,0.04088392031556591,0.04097421546421925,0.0,0.0,0.10108426411275262,0.0,0.08357546707327382,0.08762072772673206,0.15452869796198684,0.18776452191878992,0.04651476890067867,0.05043448556396647,0.20571631540705945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04674999810131953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035709564588394915,0.044717016705415946,0.0,0.04344959640989173,0.0,0.08885257137243283,0.052713078717667006,0.0,0.0986163928906617,0.09412263087595613,0.1408535382146485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419745074803923,0.040427544265329816,0.0,0.0,0.13130594904958834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04631272434494943,0.0,0.029661090408148467,0.09520862319432892,0.0,0.049709081909700165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07379052158547242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659999927358975,0.052043358918768094,0.13900089690501133,0.04719721793330958,0.1961500242527527,0.14257660808793832,0.0457920766041855,0.0,0.03277151622393048,0.04934984727812893,0.1109261862580179,0.03870903608399173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04363738571022753,0.0,0.03481198440036653,0.0,0.08093682213335535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18455875280610665,0.02966729534294367,0.0,0.0,0.13499007978031005,0.05321526295163277,0.13166151294762482,0.08848364066979537,0.051441220088641965,0.03143479308171023,0.05036131656623676,0.0452285626915722,0.0,0.0,0.03998850261290589,0.0,0.0,0.10923621808787456,0.11025281873687956,0.037139223527714996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355744864342582,0.05169251407995724,0.0,0.13389520684078635,0.0,0.06741418657371805,0.04702009533985877,0.09436770818643303,0.1973419800436213,0.10124398949445287,0.0,0.059631614949781135
mentalhealth,liinamoon,2020/03/30,"Hi this is my first post Hi, i’m kind of new to this so i’m not really sure how it all works out. When I was in 3rd grade my mom remarried to this man. Now it’s very funny because the man had a daughter who was my best friend growing up and still is. However the story begins with my stepfather. He was amazing at first, I loved him and welcomed him into my family with such happiness. I loved seeing my mom and step dad together. So the first few years were great. But then comes around 6th grade where everything started to get weird. I found that they argued a lot and many times i would find my mom crying. Arguing soon turned into complete screaming matched and banging. Holes in wall became super apparent in the house. It’s like he flipped a switch. Things started getting really bad when i used to sit in my room with 911 dialed in my phone. I remember one distinct memory of him hurting my mom and brother and just hearing screams as i peeked from my bedroom, but a lot of the time I did have with him is very blurry. By 8th grade my mom finally kicked him out and I was extremely proud of her. 
However none of us have been the same since. I think about what happened a lot, and it put strains on me. I don’t know if it’s because of what happened for those 3 years but i’ve grown to be emotionally numb. Whenever i am touched by someone and even my ~person that i’m seeing~ (i’m a senior in high school btw) i hate it. I had to tell him that i don’t like to be hugged and i just feel like i’m absolutely insane for even feeling like this. I have realized this fear of being touched is mostly by men. And it’s really hard for me to commit in any relationship.  He says he understands but i feel as though I am putting him in pain because being with me is really hard. It just sometimes feels hard to feel anything sometimes. I feel as though something just isn’t right with me and i don’t know how to fix it. I think about my (ex)stepdad every single day and I don’t know how to change anything.

I feel like I sound crazy. I’m trying to work on myself but it’s impossible when I just don’t seem to feel anything. 

Thank you if you took the time to read this and please offer some advice.",1.6710539018503638,3.7457066283185863,3.0619388576025766,91.40685438455351,80.06194690265488,6.321480289621882,22.883346741753826,7.435244526350478,0.8572017699115047,1724,57,372,25,44,561,220,452,0.111,0.765,0.124,0.7120000000000001,3,0,1,0,0,0,39.0,1,2,1,8,25,31,3,2,13,0,30,5,0,4,4,74,70,36,0,3,13,8,13,5,1,1,2,5,2,4,24,27,0,0,19,1,0,7,8,12,0,4,11,20,58,19,56,54,11,53,0,1,2,3,43,22,0,8,27,242,82,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109468763703795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04947543813048321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796118394855102,0.0647667770451797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060746825222241924,0.13305108984339045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635117901836465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696443251502783,0.06267141176536191,0.07628152906635126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991721341282251,0.04692052297058201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183882692929709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610709542602693,0.0,0.061298659503646914,0.0,0.06538689909514822,0.0,0.06858630579933106,0.0818688463014672,0.2942941954954011,0.15592712013154095,0.0,0.07969881050436646,0.06649613805645715,0.18565438358480216,0.0,0.07977136580019921,0.05620981360858897,0.0,0.07602226747781726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021190385163594,0.0,0.0,0.12867282457076373,0.07744833539021803,0.19552076338648386,0.07182983687087853,0.0,0.0,0.08199941567440325,0.0,0.0,0.07686894239198458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394872673323159,0.07788501323989161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576243723923598,0.1199516285139228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17772044934460762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18555938473227174,0.13132724370968918,0.0,0.0,0.07376146970391162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4260449502612263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702665836817125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04930021578703457,0.0,0.07741573492635348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06352627325028773,0.0,0.07986240481395503,0.0,0.0,0.0696785354057766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462763897449199,0.0,0.0,0.07277401670488301,0.0,0.18643314288921034,0.0,0.0,0.07811092110100455,0.08241647141228152,0.06213179888832813,0.0,0.05785716204914008,0.0,0.07363126445879864,0.1159515603212149,0.06623280806871013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06018313223391882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06164450631455772,0.056009836419009466,0.14391178212376945,0.0,0.10299177614174386,0.0,0.058101700601210685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857009345812409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359048975506107,0.06698241069274445,0.0,0.0,0.04833474295208709,0.09323607183180224,0.14296151642069407,0.0,0.1272709018077503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808327357761808,0.04939541323036843,0.07913581731390623,0.0,0.0757398216319429,0.08751449900132972,0.06283638024572896,0.0,0.12005988067743552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593203507789052,0.0,0.0,0.051682587436453084,0.0,0.0,0.09370280422658353
mentalhealth,throwaway035810,2020/03/30,If I had a gun I would shoot myself I want to die so badly but in the same time I don’t . Sometimes I feel like she doesn’t care about me but then she does . I’m garbage overall and I know she’ll choose someone else over me even though we have been talking for half a year .,0.02251366120218634,1.7238637377049209,1.3356557377049183,103.59452185792351,83.75409836065573,4.066666666666666,18.36338797814207,3.1291,-1.0603792349726775,212,5,55,0,6,67,48,61,0.141,0.711,0.147,0.3301,0,0,0,2,0,1,3.0,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,0,0,11,12,7,1,3,3,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,1,13,2,5,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,4,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524955904734937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083221090536481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138487047520705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646367025671413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526206206999639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19973568758126686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529050826785551,0.2160382325847569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619391032137262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773983539818392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562268227910994,0.0,0.299086333075802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24306172928722405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971114323387929,0.0,0.1763348201571302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17836633720158032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21481987551157128,0.0,0.0,0.1947389414644722
mentalhealth,doodleaf,2020/03/30,"(I think) my anxiety stops me from learning new things So I have professionally diagnosed anxiety disorder (the mood disorder) but I haven't been in a few years because I procrastinate oops and also would probably struggle to find identity outside of my mental illness. That's the best professional info I have. Not currently on medication and not a fan of the ones I've been on before. 



I want to throw up at the idea of trying things I don't know how to do/haven't tried before in front of people who know how to do them. I've had this like forever, I remember being like 6 years old and going down a big slide for the first time because my mum and her friend, plus my friend who already went down the slide first, were all encouraging me like yes you can do it!! And I went down, didn't get hurt, and cried for 20 minutes. Perhaps not the correct response to successfully doing something for the first time. 



Even in my current life, I feel like I need to already know how to do the thing before I actually try it for the first time. The other day, I was helping a station at work with which I'm not familiar because we were busy, I'm allowed to, and because cross-training is valuable. It's food prep, and I knew basically what to do but checked with a supervisor and he said yeah just turn that this way so it's easier/faster on your hands and I nearly cried (not usually a crier). Even if I had done it perfectly the first time, the idea of the supervisor congratulating me for knowing how to makes me feel sick. 



I'm not even sure what I'm afraid of. I can't bring myself to go a fitness class or any class with other people wherein I'll try something new. Most of my current hobbies (painting, sewing, crafting, writing) I was shown how to do once when I was like 5 or 6 and have just done them/got better on my own. Even after doing art for 10+ years and being experienced by now, I hate the idea of an art class. 



I don't know if I'm looking for advice, because I know I'd kind of just have to do it, break the feedback loop in my brain that says it's bad, remember that there's nothing to be anxious about, maybe assist this with medication. I don't want to do any of that (not helpful, I'm aware). Just ranting I guess. Anyone else have this?",3.981089285714287,4.96575338021978,5.152675137362639,83.44560611263738,71.24175824175825,8.149038461538463,28.724244505494504,8.472884824447931,1.9369464285714288,1768,66,367,28,32,586,216,455,0.08,0.752,0.16899999999999998,0.9934,4,0,2,0,0,0,55.0,1,2,1,10,20,21,1,2,24,2,37,9,2,7,4,72,68,28,0,6,17,1,3,5,2,1,6,2,0,0,26,18,1,1,18,2,1,9,13,5,0,6,16,7,42,15,56,48,5,52,0,1,1,0,17,17,0,6,29,240,68,10,0.0,0.0,0.07299136380327335,0.0,0.0,0.07309104451658563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16508133532091593,0.05981536448000365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172944198966563,0.0,0.11443944173631687,0.08449964564798339,0.0,0.052300003146663165,0.07663866106201425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062452611497895015,0.22797866371235415,0.0,0.19094094994775526,0.0,0.07849513951050527,0.06615212321949691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834985107610422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16432261811232707,0.04823806316855732,0.0,0.0,0.07591767321742253,0.0,0.0,0.17144834519326066,0.0,0.0,0.15308719011743271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624835366484871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976116141337095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563951280630207,0.053435197751400224,0.0,0.0,0.068363366496226,0.318112676354801,0.090445177987502,0.0,0.11557639889239768,0.0,0.039078496025194885,0.0,0.08501804536123128,0.0,0.0598222243658482,0.0,0.08239764585218615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384683692756433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027009146047293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007204418640801,0.25331110261221584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0778898657127391,0.2466398013958094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0528315367890713,0.18271088468482247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06281088404608297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049927770792455216,0.0,0.0751439295990315,0.0,0.0,0.1507007979028351,0.07537807415946134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05546124156782056,0.0,0.1444793743838837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177001547787544,0.0,0.078487171878282,0.07965667098668733,0.05068457836349178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037100437873522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064412764753276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16946149370960092,0.0,0.07114934963945857,0.0594818058492168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11516521369272485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253388227194663,0.0,0.0781943660289477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049555909214197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907598441862613,0.04792708220058055,0.0,0.0,0.17445960139221528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031297959008191,0.08135797115639586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237864585002842,0.0,0.08823475721428267,0.059370605974983726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867567134807204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05445331675933074,0.0,0.0,0.05313384761370203,0.0,0.0,0.1445010041401344
mentalhealth,Atropyzz,2020/03/30,"Uhm, help i guess? Hello, Im just here to Ask for advice or whatever on how to stop dissociating..I have been dissociating for the better part of 3 hours and even typing this is really hard and takes up most, if not all, focus and effort. I keep forgetting what I am doing or what I’m supposed to be typing. Dissociating isn’t uncommon for me but I can usually ground myself after a couple of minutes. I have never experienced this for so long. I haven’t been diagnosed with anything except ADHD. Thanks in advance. <3",2.8330693069306925,5.254897108910897,5.40642574257426,74.29043069306934,77.91089108910893,8.000396039603961,22.971287128712873,8.841846274778883,2.035502178217821,412,13,73,10,10,146,74,101,0.031,0.887,0.08199999999999999,0.6911,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,5,2,0,0,2,0,11,1,0,1,2,19,17,9,0,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,2,8,2,15,14,3,11,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,5,6,57,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749813967172558,0.22358742760328845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882885603806048,0.0,0.21390353904163026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20236108484927728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25317045234026103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322341591446107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511247812947308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25205656586938713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20496601542532406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15336442353143764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253286796846537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471506856542202,0.0,0.0,0.20337406123462895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024868819463645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764699654952668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477755457480571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14657954139768534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912927906244208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17203429268221662,0.0,0.0,0.21065462693805434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519984443630521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whxte-alien,2020/03/30,"Should I be concerned? Good morning guys, hope you are doing ok during this difficult time. 

I’ve been doing well but what I’m doing is most likely concerning, I myself am getting quite worried. 

So I’ve been restricting my food intake and exercising everyday (no more than 20 mins), but I’m developing symptoms and I’m wondering if I should worry?

This morning I walked up the stairs, felt dizzy and wanted to vomit on the spot. I usually feel light headed when I get up from a sitting position, but not feel nauseous? This may be tmi but I haven’t pooped in a week or maybe more, perhaps from not getting enough nutrition? I eat from every food group (or so I hope), and try to eat more fibre but to be honest I’m not eating enough. I eat 600- cals a day and drink water as my only beverage, and more of it (except the occasional unsweetened black tea which I had this morning). 

Not to mention I feel tired 24/7 no matter how much sleep I get, and feel I look paler than usual (even tho I’m literally a sheet of paper naturally)..

I know what I’m doing is not healthy, but truth is, I feel better being in control of myself. And tbh I absolutely hate seeing myself in the mirror, so I took these drastic changes and disregarded my health in a way. I’ve been losing around 2.8 Ibs a week. 

Should I be concerned?",2.4263320463320457,4.658365795366798,4.077427027027028,84.28176216216217,78.30501930501929,6.6150424710424724,23.48741312741313,7.699297019823105,1.2553387181467175,1027,34,198,16,25,343,146,259,0.159,0.778,0.063,-0.9802,0,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,0,4,9,12,1,0,10,1,23,17,3,2,1,47,48,25,0,7,15,0,6,1,0,4,5,0,0,1,9,10,9,3,8,2,0,2,8,3,1,0,6,10,26,9,22,33,8,22,0,1,3,0,4,9,0,8,10,131,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943094835179636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878387668404026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815697589813295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252738244590624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720331056904805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941716611353433,0.0,0.4571615827252142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308186090378569,0.0,0.073772542633088,0.0,0.09410664117020613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823780984589935,0.0,0.10724333299516324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701205909699421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23342109939793204,0.0,0.0,0.09368325843135383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105941843269966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11027426600283234,0.11462981562475727,0.11872503070671672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218738134014136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06138385925426865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054567831304975806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937944592259906,0.1249565229581722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11221119313789704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210761784747063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494798509323281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879984914476376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900530589600324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177422323831407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609237500547917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512941275177439,0.12837531584215858,0.0,0.0,0.12409565432736032,0.07583259513281493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460293516519822,0.0,0.06587975526485465,0.08865714861229118,0.17918767233514746,0.0,0.10042592383465652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112690073370765,0.0,0.22686046278373498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoundProfessional3,2020/03/30,Can anyone message me please So I'll only give the basics my wife to be left me then I lost my job and am supporting her sister to boot. I'm very lost and trying to support them all and I'm about to break I want to jump off a bridge. If anyone can talk and help explain why I feel so bad I would greatly appreciate it.,0.3241428571428564,2.1559379857142846,2.6385714285714315,93.95642857142859,83.42857142857143,5.142857142857143,18.57142857142857,6.1826913282559595,-0.2478571428571428,249,6,58,2,7,85,50,70,0.11800000000000001,0.688,0.193,0.5861,1,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,1,2,3,6,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,1,10,15,8,0,3,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,1,10,3,7,11,1,5,0,2,0,0,9,2,0,1,1,34,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927816379239021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17480857348806336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585974722167887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20083916344553399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23082240821257335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033097440860184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077595376086261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274724887544511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4570868361712679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15922927943128812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22981666959184816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4751631650497437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16827729183928802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214309459077018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17274562413415814,0.12348716627497827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889166932865288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872479921190254,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaykrtm,2020/03/30,"I don't want to go to sleep at the same time I do Ever since this quarantine started I started staying up really late and waking up really late. I want to go to sleep early but I can't bring myself to do it and most of the times I'm not even doing anything just watching YouTube, is there any ideas of what I could do to motivate myself to go to sleep instead of waiting to pass out",2.7499186991869915,3.689334073170734,4.5619512195121965,86.69747967479677,74.12195121951221,7.417886178861789,25.861788617886177,7.793537801064563,1.3436032520325198,302,10,65,4,6,103,50,82,0.028999999999999998,0.9259999999999999,0.045,0.4902,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,0,8,4,4,1,1,15,18,3,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,1,8,0,16,17,2,18,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,1,8,48,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12513376359765374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15142534228967092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469177793829203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12153750440148095,0.16644844920104984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137330092948213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077259772653172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4151447582972708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235764267185866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15221576859337624,0.0,0.5524315550446718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26048781082512434,0.1961312011655872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145965424657701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21706886491071206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lady06054,2020/03/30,"Feeling like a bad person No matter what I can't get out of this mindset that I should be ""punished"" or people hate me for some reason. It's been swamping my mind for weeks now and I just don't know what to do. But I'm just having trouble figuring out where this all comes from. I have healthy friendships, a good family life, and I'm at home all day since I'm online schooled so no one outside of family really knows me. I feel like I'm being constantly judged all the time and I don't even know by who. I just want to feel better in all honesty...

I haven't done anything wrong or really noteworthy this passed year I think... I don't really use social media, and I'm at home 24/7.",1.6913286713286697,3.507487223776227,3.38811188811189,90.36370629370631,78.86013986013988,6.637762237762238,20.79020979020979,7.61054688173877,0.6639202797202799,535,14,116,8,13,178,90,143,0.105,0.737,0.158,0.5556,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,2,0,3,0,13,1,0,2,4,32,30,8,0,2,6,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,8,7,0,0,9,0,0,2,7,5,0,1,2,3,13,4,13,25,5,14,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,3,8,72,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329204172058829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348657200260672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285477444848368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13913854825932476,0.0,0.17454996692259114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416956098160396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529504232702014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668502079594533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045407387699341,0.0,0.2450140301351536,0.2307854306371409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438957759438696,0.0,0.0,0.13547859430153608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159471423132069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32404330805706993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663079541794117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140891161834268,0.1578248494569286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309310626924786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945278333861737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119803431261449,0.14103645007172858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31042906308875673,0.16607348375425052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634708227357657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361424950944825,0.0,0.0,0.1646532875429752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349800103951888,0.0,0.0,0.09418589228256223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13950479938117205,0.0,0.0,0.09527098849525732,0.0,0.12956473958427836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17660104180063435,0.0,0.10401610383955308
mentalhealth,SmolBean402,2020/03/30,Need help Does anyone know where to go to try and get on anti-depressants/anxiety meds with all this  COVID-19 going on? I don't have a Primary Physician and no where is taking new patients. I was just getting financially stable enough to get on them before this virus hit and now idk how to get them. I'm from the southern US if it helps any?,5.76195652173913,5.6625344347826125,6.1867753623188415,81.430597826087,66.97101449275362,9.218840579710145,30.29347826086957,8.841846274778883,2.216156521739131,272,9,55,4,4,88,55,69,0.053,0.833,0.115,0.644,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,2,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,1,1,10,15,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,9,13,2,9,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,2,35,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647282255853059,0.0,0.18530924583378255,0.0,0.0,0.16937646659520525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061242924453255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119816340200804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25029368929946005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5062315241581079,0.0,0.2753356645072207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247302633831016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13312611717255282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690686713929093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17961431289779786,0.0,0.2339522414597537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821307050463704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16446178307773715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291379089871948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,foolproofapricot,2020/03/30,"Paranoid thoughts about my housemate I’m not sure where to post this, please help. 

I haven’t gotten along well with my housemate since she moved in. I noticed she was dangerous the first day, she later accused me of taking her spices when she offered them for my dinner. 

I personally have been diagnosed bipolar/anxiety for a few years and I fear it’s getting worse living with her. I’ve found myself starting to get really strange thoughts and feel extremely threatened by her. 

I hide my food and throw most refridgerated or bulk items out because I can’t stop seeing her “spit” in my food. I’ve taken my Brita pitcher to my room and put wrappers over my cups for fear she would sneak into my room do something to it. I try to keep peace with her so I don’t have to hide my food. Before brushing my teeth, I put the bristles of my toothbrush to my cheek to check that it’s dry and she didn’t throw it in the toilet or something. I heard a bag crinkling outside my door and I thought she was planting something like poison or something on my things so I jumped up and ran out to check and it was my other roommate eating chips. 

I don’t know what’s going on, I talk to my therapist tomorrow over the phone, I’ve never dealt with this kind of extreme paranoia before, what is this?. It is wrecking havoc on my stability and I’m stuck in a lease until June. Any tips/advice  would be very welcomed and appreciated! Please help.",3.607243293246995,5.388855191489366,4.171880974406417,86.99021739130438,73.32624113475177,6.464631514030219,27.154486586493988,7.079830092131019,1.2872514338575392,1132,42,222,11,23,358,156,282,0.142,0.773,0.085,-0.9295,0,0,4,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,1,6,9,2,2,7,0,17,10,3,0,2,35,37,17,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,2,2,1,3,1,14,18,5,2,6,1,2,8,7,4,1,1,14,5,47,5,37,20,3,36,0,0,1,0,21,16,0,4,12,146,61,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124361006814067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782453025364679,0.0,0.08802121161415834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014000731801892,0.0,0.19581656471067524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420470952313778,0.0,0.0,0.11678430929298475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773594282130748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25895082041620426,0.058178207286749675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787067387864164,0.41739599723641657,0.12615824915632484,0.0,0.0,0.12022905795441816,0.0,0.06539171502606367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542456832208128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227134266930044,0.0,0.11981813697232804,0.06323441703241926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056212904226180437,0.0,0.10160081120562632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12229144139173252,0.0,0.0,0.0887419969018793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309975050710073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004666690646352,0.0,0.2526044543345917,0.0,0.0,0.11019645887206077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23133580625093425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371090696417215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916885757836174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517949849814177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3543177593750939,0.0,0.0,0.08144063991637278,0.0,0.0,0.09619599678223724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844346023646616,0.0,0.08651141640661646,0.09248152790104217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13359447919281034,0.0764412954835116,0.0,0.0,0.2740363136484433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811874332332021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493722583439028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10345349454685904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725680450104732,0.16347180914972648,0.0,0.0,0.07409539503104591
mentalhealth,Sassy_-molassy_-,2020/03/30,"Walking out my door is probably one of the hardest things I have to do in a day I am terrified to take the bus I am terrified to be around people it’s actually 247 panic mode at home for me I work a London drugs and well it’s a good company to work for but today as a cashier I wanted to stop breathing and pass out every time I rang someone threw it was also my first day and I had no assistance, I was sweating so hard and honestly I think I had severe anxiety all day they gave the pharmacy and the insurance place all plastic covers but not us ?? When we are breaking the social distancing rule just to ring someone in ... I had three people cough without covering there mouths in front of me today as I rang them threw. Tonight I lay here wanting to off myself because I don’t feel like going to work and dieing on the floor because I passed out of fear....... fuck this stupid pandemic",3.7835769230769247,4.895758272222224,5.084444444444447,83.27115384615384,71.83333333333333,8.427350427350428,28.84615384615385,8.841846274778883,2.221576923076923,699,27,141,13,13,233,115,180,0.165,0.7759999999999999,0.059000000000000004,-0.9636,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,2,0,2,4,8,8,2,2,10,0,13,6,3,0,2,23,23,13,1,2,5,0,2,1,0,0,2,3,2,0,5,11,0,1,2,0,0,7,4,4,1,3,8,5,24,4,26,14,2,30,0,0,0,1,6,12,1,0,11,100,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.14610487191880106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119730824453172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145351936594028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328231377488267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18253553147293936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896705448543916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538545562370182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17362736910659413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12614534090905208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16847633553740188,0.07570280067893233,0.1069598143756566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735153698410795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13841348993068936,0.0,0.0,0.08508918028828817,0.1255778170949683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411948185000006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15018110971637758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731455038352076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145397269209963,0.0,0.0,0.17566385959001446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075936367634333,0.0,0.15642526530135806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16142320580147626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16914069365599432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15262042342376536,0.2537141049147237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517240922573936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257061394832288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946714458053818,0.09593436595088864,0.0,0.0,0.08730278620739929,0.0,0.2838336203498766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18009441642603696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766171671531523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13461602965211322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14432448957287158,0.0,0.3269932683592001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Thackers640,2020/03/30,"Torture addiction? I think I’m addicted to self torture / self harm , I cut , waterboard , choke , suffocate , drink deodorant and try to take as many pills as I can , is there anyway to stop this",4.319904761904763,6.526513371428571,5.142857142857146,78.9704761904762,72.42857142857143,10.380952380952381,31.666666666666664,10.504223727775694,3.9113809523809526,148,7,27,5,3,48,27,35,0.433,0.5670000000000001,0.0,-0.9590000000000001,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,5,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5994201247944995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693229419977545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787319445285827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5736158256480928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22985055511572386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067102348335984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17616156311827594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18665679569239035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wlpublic,2020/03/30,"Advice: Don't say it's drugs. G'day Reddit 

When I was first diagnosed with mental illness the poor advice I was given at the time was to claim that it was caused by drugs so you can get out of the mental health facility. So I ended up claiming that and at first they didn't believe me as my test results were negative but eventually they came around to the idea so they sent me to rehab for 6 weeks afterwards and while rehab was enjoyable compared to being in a mental health facility. It didn't offer me the support I needed at that time.

Ontop of that when it came around to relapsing for the second time and ending back up in hospital I then had to explain what happened. I also wasn't offered medial care or mental health supports while in hospital because it was assumed to be drugs.

Cheers Reddit, William.",4.589535864978902,6.215749746835448,5.601962025316457,78.35058016877637,70.51898734177216,8.051476793248945,27.723628691983123,8.59863814320734,2.1815932489451484,652,23,115,11,12,215,91,158,0.06,0.848,0.092,0.7968,0,0,3,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,3,2,9,5,0,0,7,0,15,10,0,2,0,17,26,15,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,10,1,0,0,10,9,0,0,3,0,1,3,5,0,0,3,15,1,14,5,25,9,0,29,0,0,0,0,9,11,0,2,15,90,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22484204426806895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200175559997537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20482957356585926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846280241047004,0.0,0.0701306010026396,0.0,0.0,0.12961675655235724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26316255195205285,0.11729644092509607,0.11818330467621915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419475809987597,0.0,0.0,0.11676864761733667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4002483784180204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037921338196976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19571509733444786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06010646715571715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10173425708661886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668636045571466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987224021725655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4637547704810146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530469782056757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148871050036436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611042869874015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012516735736198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228247120506336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throw-Away932,2020/03/30,"Im scared about my sister I think my sister is cutting herself. I found her pocketknife in the bathroom, and there was blood on it. She dosnt like to talk to me and she always seems really angry now. I cant tell our mom about it because she would probably freak out and get really mad at her. Im scared she might kill herself. Is there anything I can do? please help.",0.8230666666666693,3.2273502400000043,2.2920000000000016,93.47266666666668,86.6,4.933333333333334,19.0,6.42735559955562,0.059800000000000075,288,8,60,3,9,93,53,75,0.251,0.6629999999999999,0.086,-0.9381,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,0,5,7,3,2,1,0,8,1,1,0,0,9,12,3,1,1,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,2,0,16,1,8,8,0,5,0,0,0,0,15,4,0,2,2,41,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17177381407408365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698817355329115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12584331924825004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263497457648693,0.0,0.0,0.1078558749963753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383717331836845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4459791644507459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283942050322065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085568455008156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189991921662856,0.0,0.24177890201246655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266080672491714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22257619497782727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645002631697008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4133629739509404,0.0,0.0,0.18793434357380007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592787604724055,0.1804368151997424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13227779757527247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466483669843668,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oof_oof_bot,2020/03/30,"A big shoutout to those assholes People who don't even reply to your messages but they're online the whole time but all you can see in their Insta and social media stories is talking about mental health.

You dumbos don't even know what people are going through and you're doing it because it makes you look like you care.

No, you don't. 

You are only trying to be aware but you don't even care.

Please stop doing this fucking bullshit and carry on with whatever you were on to.",2.78693567251462,5.039380863157895,3.5561403508771967,88.36742690058483,77.21052631578948,5.485380116959064,21.08187134502924,6.42735559955562,0.38788888888888895,382,10,72,3,9,121,65,95,0.149,0.741,0.11,-0.4994,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,9,1,0,4,4,1,0,2,0,12,2,0,1,1,11,20,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,2,10,3,10,18,2,7,0,0,2,1,14,4,1,0,3,52,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12925344882167492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4323638841625181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42013771548968654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960212435641661,0.0,0.0,0.12050333347073278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253813383327372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652788184937278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358869377605223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780544559366719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415337835089087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21367955869193006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16126077588707732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939941970594983,0.0,0.0,0.2327487418302243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689629797705413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21614110884565474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17726921941379242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17042422563929205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363824311893573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439566002092558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367274555896288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,namuamidabutsu23,2020/03/30,"People's ""compassion"" reeks strongly of narcissism to me. You can look at my post history. It's incredible. So many say I can talk to them. Then I try and mostly I end up ghosted. They say they care. They couldn't care whether I live or die I don't necessarily feel suicidal. It just seems like an inevitability I have to come to terms with. I can't live like this anymore. This is a really horrible species to have been born into. I don't want anything to do with anyone. People are fucking horrible.",1.1701165501165498,3.7740091818181862,3.2325252525252526,85.45083916083918,88.4949494949495,7.086557886557888,23.77700077700078,8.139509932561175,1.8396054390054388,395,16,79,10,13,133,68,99,0.122,0.713,0.165,0.5239,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,4,1,2,7,1,0,2,0,12,1,0,0,0,13,20,5,3,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,1,5,15,5,12,18,2,9,0,0,1,1,8,3,1,3,6,52,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19799726754956976,0.1395985931425395,0.0,0.164293374676883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40710908635146703,0.0,0.0,0.17197915957304916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20720320679626425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17682895736353527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094807780542707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457145079881326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19507595349318696,0.0,0.35258585896702305,0.0,0.16765412082832346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20241183677248525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768217081529801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19120769138297086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278996847505571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175363638446789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1817521314258216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21838261653415092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16046957975354212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13554795423991642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775762172371185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pattycake455,2020/03/30,"Need help with Suicidal Thoughts I need some opinions ! 

I have been struggling with depression since high school but it has definitely gotten worse since my best friend committed suicide last March. I’ve also been dealing with chronic back pain and doctors haven’t been able to figure out what’s wrong with me. Waiting for a MRI but can’t get one right now because of the pandemic. Being in pain everyday makes it really hard to stay motivated in any way and all I want to do do is die. I’ve tried anti depressants/ therapy but nothing has really helped. Working out / yoga is the way I usually cope, but with gyms closed during covid, my mental health has been the worst it’s ever been. I really feel like I should take myself to the hospital but not sure if that’s a good idea because of the pandemic 
What do you think I should do ?",5.401038961038964,6.5370875341614925,5.8026538678712605,79.52940146809715,68.06832298136646,9.581253529079618,29.54319593450028,9.800150414767053,2.769591304347826,667,24,125,15,11,214,105,161,0.242,0.605,0.153,-0.9641,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,1,0,3,4,12,0,1,7,0,20,6,0,2,4,36,31,9,3,6,7,0,2,1,1,2,6,0,0,0,6,10,0,1,6,2,0,0,3,7,0,1,7,2,12,5,16,21,4,17,0,2,0,0,5,7,0,3,8,79,18,4,0.13188372510595908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546736731895798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968545555768917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014104439099632,0.0,0.16079018944822512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840383291946473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596632958930754,0.22718251836529416,0.0,0.13687448490508108,0.0,0.0,0.13498858103787778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192963798440962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668437407613036,0.09421775956731146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189303886513884,0.0,0.06890380306784713,0.0,0.0,0.11061781143792217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181419130913495,0.0,0.0,0.14018623262661553,0.0,0.0,0.17679776189782345,0.13934239649340868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888067270243496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750283824766503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443172638250143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803341060213657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329077755236154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19558022214691131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654599116290344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936782530943081,0.0,0.2806671640134704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25346427413598865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262798064005768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347337074327692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21819116051292026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057050327496326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787350450744215,0.0,0.2885187793423153,0.0,0.12429885013259045,0.0,0.0991601481475796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15082053343927698,0.0,0.0,0.08450576581647896,0.0,0.10470094617908328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954039227186594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14525129081187488,0.0,0.07778843805698785,0.20936632461400487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601292260472333,0.0,0.1344007830248214,0.0,0.14419414994935245,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,putoelquelolea123,2020/03/30,"What is it called Is there a name for when your brain tells you we need to do something but you don’t know what so then your body resorts you not moving for several hours and just staring blankly? Also maybe unrelated but sometimes when thing around me get “too much” I put my hands on my ears. When I was young I never had these problems but lately I’ve been developing these tendencies and they have been really deteriorating my university life and life in general, I feel very lost and don’t know who to turn to",4.095569306930692,5.8407838415841615,4.755532178217823,83.45428836633664,71.97029702970299,8.218316831683168,25.496287128712872,8.841846274778883,1.7183752475247522,412,13,84,8,8,132,73,101,0.035,0.935,0.03,-0.1287,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,1,5,1,1,9,2,0,0,1,0,10,6,4,0,1,19,17,13,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,7,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,5,4,15,0,8,12,1,13,0,1,1,0,11,3,0,0,8,60,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16256929472729434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809693689905147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258070769035819,0.0,0.2269365759651925,0.2075797189569286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027884921987516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620955991905914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20019767480949088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234434742821573,0.0,0.2293176545237381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28717657243498595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22191280409708355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20423006269628044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160629117963745,0.14944002885900892,0.1507354340270692,0.15678819409631334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19451910700139308,0.0,0.20436053141785065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302314618961338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22965751219807845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650099042197865,0.20105697387930546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17768262263140774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350554764560256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22111890659398056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16773384317175194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dyl299,2020/03/30,"My brain is dumb Like half an hour earlier I was talking to so many people but I stay up late and everyone went to bed. Now I’m sitting here and all my brain keeps telling me that I’m good for nothing and no one likes me. I’m starting to believe and and don’t now why. Like I should be happy, I have a decent amount of friends again and I’m getting matches on dating apps finally and having good convo. Why does my brain have to make me feel so bad",1.7244587628865986,3.0961992164948486,3.2500902061855683,93.35699097938148,77.45360824742268,6.087113402061857,24.496134020618552,6.6274283507984215,0.6246711340206188,352,12,81,3,8,116,66,97,0.07400000000000001,0.679,0.24600000000000002,0.9615,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,1,0,2,0,8,3,3,1,1,13,18,10,0,1,1,0,1,3,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,7,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,2,2,1,10,7,8,14,2,13,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,11,47,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376170535372088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856946707582424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5519778316748299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14423429413875566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749170124170844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08333748288287443,0.0,0.0,0.18055125402694214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273388181257159,0.0,0.08611117054463142,0.0,0.0,0.27648486155765434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17545298340728638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623136008782687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649877792044938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859231096771068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2415668424083386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100180207255286,0.16710068531301234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814835962012558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168567921926854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426480259125245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665979842845445,0.17567521736261746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247533927004512,0.14405914714165854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278894533384918,0.29744718094001205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,secomodd131,2020/03/30,"Sociopathic Tendencies? So a little bit about my self. I am empathetic, while not as much as most people I really do care for my family deeply. I have done somethings I dont have remorse for and I know its wrong I just dont really care if im hurting the person, but it is decently justifiable to someone like myself. I guess i can fall into the category of conman haha. 

So ever since I was 15 ive gone on to seek how to make money on my own. Ive developed multiple schemes that prey on weak men (i am a male). My first scheme was a fake premium snapchat, i found ways to send live snaps on snapchat that worked very well. I had over 500 horny dudes text me daily asking for pics, and the unlucky ones actually payed me 15$ cashapp too get into it. I racked up at least 1000$ over the time I did this but found a better way to make ever more money. 

The worst kind of man to exist is a pedophile, so I decided to blackmail and extort them. I would find typically older men and tell them i was 13 and would send them pics and stuff (usually younger looking porn actresses). I would siphon information from them such as there last name, location, and place of work. All while screenshoting pics of our convos (sexual convos of him acknowledging my age and such) secretly through an app. 

Show them all the dirt ive gotten on them, threaten to send it all to there relatives through facebook, employers, and friends. Pay me 500-1000$ through cashapp right now and i wont do it. 

Made over 10k doing this, honestly dont feel sorry one bit. I fucked over and stole money from pedophiles and bought a lexus.... now this would be more like vigilante work if i donated the money to organizations that try to catch pedos, which is a future plan of mine if i do another cycle of this. The money is just too easy and I have zero remorse, im definitely not a full on sociopath im a pretty social and decently caring guy. Maybe just a good conman?",2.6626674107142847,4.730912580729168,4.237815476190477,84.22087500000002,76.83854166666666,7.721904761904763,24.25267857142857,8.591530228387361,1.6972353571428571,1517,51,305,32,35,506,209,384,0.08,0.7759999999999999,0.14400000000000002,0.9741,2,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,1,0,6,6,19,18,1,0,19,1,32,3,0,4,5,51,50,28,0,7,10,0,1,2,1,5,1,0,0,7,14,16,0,0,9,2,9,6,6,6,1,4,12,2,44,12,44,32,13,39,0,1,1,2,25,18,1,5,15,206,58,6,0.0,0.0,0.09610417606775493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10326691036416404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920673282632864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709928087214673,0.21503356349351932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012267315618725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10078122606680108,0.34626033244672905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17816512220313058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284001688266676,0.0,0.04979543248437058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001071726848765,0.0837686955409799,0.0,0.2159607478878419,0.07608690953061725,0.09104497496732447,0.05145275367905878,0.0,0.0,0.08260198640745088,0.0,0.0,0.10848896981689074,0.09751261285617596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542696329576606,0.0,0.3191322136403953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255379511096588,0.05412310366503018,0.08027593267544778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622661156775364,0.09870478507096532,0.08696136527223854,0.0,0.08270003387805434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931860013723128,0.13147493141355568,0.0,0.09893835468086493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239556402016713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346783480010804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06827498342815791,0.08599063927287852,0.10289267592884764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019154706996536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618011665450954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410304638100365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273815096015286,0.0,0.0,0.08146528592743198,0.0,0.0,0.10038994491849942,0.08344343583268217,0.07581621576106175,0.0,0.11024247911051836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273827004699875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607756422557603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05742561645407941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686277887091616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108463953438822,0.08125792181923279,0.0,0.1563407743756463,0.0,0.0,0.08854709939048942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150880954389264,0.0,0.0,0.2798350040416962,0.1076745513161282,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LuckyLizardHat,2020/03/30,"Emotional Numbness Help Request Hello! I deal with PTSD related to an abusive relationship I found myself in a little over a year ago (sorry to start with such a dark topic). Recently, I've been coming to the realization that I deal with emotional numbness due to what occured. And due to my current situation I cant seek professional help even though its whats highly suggested to do when looking online, and id like to given the chance. 

My numbness affects my day to day in feeling disconnected in a static sort of way to everything around me if that makes sense. I dont feel joy or sadness really and on the rare occasion I do its fleeting.

If anyone who deals with a similar issue or has advice could lend a hand Id be beyond grateful, I just would like something to help until im in a position I can get myself professional help :)

Thank you so much if you took the time to read this <3",6.482971428571428,6.4310880685714285,7.620142857142856,71.59935714285717,65.45714285714286,10.657142857142855,34.07142857142857,10.355215969177356,3.559000000000001,712,29,129,16,10,243,112,175,0.127,0.73,0.14400000000000002,0.2837,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,0,8,8,0,0,12,0,10,4,1,2,0,23,21,12,0,5,6,0,3,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,3,1,0,2,2,4,0,0,4,4,16,4,25,14,1,25,0,1,1,0,14,10,0,6,14,86,24,3,0.0,0.15994563186738142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13191442289087574,0.11966389845461467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09439083512779088,0.0,0.0,0.1201731423314663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628524422234313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10778160061548178,0.0,0.0,0.17411972441603038,0.4175181796425347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15821178085866786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30369981170914595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891621614090748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12132376335622047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13651388820043714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480137832023907,0.0,0.0,0.07052871230260233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36193411479356175,0.142628408829072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14581651756827668,0.1408985015892609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190234764594452,0.13529929676035285,0.0,0.0,0.11336083065996667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010943972513802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923600860338634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15780058070404904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13503037616659205,0.0,0.0864805137674946,0.0,0.13329013607475185,0.14493286940254768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15173873770482654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10392485701810476,0.0,0.15111455727346074,0.0955493382403336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428419540266435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326307672277863,0.0,0.0787159965616721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998312876826633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715183064724676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958957542649804,0.0,0.0,0.086931610178191
mentalhealth,Gothicsnowangel,2020/03/30,"How do I stop oversharing and overthinking? My brain is constantly making me do stupid shit. I feel like everyone secretly dislikes me which makes me incredibly insecure about what I should or shouldnt say. I can write a text for multiple hours, send it and delete it a few hours later because I feel like no one cares what im saying or that they think that im embarassing myself.

My bf is not helping. He wants to restrict my talking with people because I tend to overshare thanks to overthinking which only increases my level on overthinking and insecurity. He says I embarass him sometimes and that sometimes I disappoint him by saying something I shouldnt.

I struggle the most with his friends. I try acting cool and collected around them which is what my bf wants me to do but I always fail. I feel like such a failure. I feel like his friends just leave me on read because im so annoying. I even had to make my own Discord channel named ""gothics timeout corner"" where I can post whatever I want but no one ever reads it. I was forced in to use a Discord group to have calls on with his friends because apparently I was annoying when I made separate groups to call people who wanted to game.

His friends are extremely introverted and im extremely extroverted. I really like his friends and I only want them to like me back so I would get along with them while dating my bf but I dont know if they hate me instead and are only trying to be nice.

People make me feel so incredibly insecure about my personality that im scared to talk but I cant stop and then I regret it.

If there has ever been people who make me feel insecure about my personality I usually distance myself from them but I cant do that with my bfs friends and family because theyre such a huge part in my bfs life.

I wish there was a way to stop thinking. I wish I could stop worrying all the time. I wish I wasnt so insecure. I wish I could just bury myself under ground and never come out.

I really dont know how to stop. I need help.",3.644375,5.34568531328321,4.946997963659147,81.80327890037596,73.06015037593986,8.496271929824562,28.00759711779449,9.103633062298675,2.3491484335839603,1596,62,314,35,32,530,182,399,0.201,0.632,0.166,-0.9432,1,1,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,6,1,23,31,5,7,8,1,30,3,2,9,4,82,63,29,0,19,12,0,6,6,9,4,1,4,0,2,17,20,0,6,11,4,0,4,11,15,0,2,7,11,73,16,34,49,6,38,0,3,0,0,45,13,1,5,25,214,90,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05429736580123421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05809076168178993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05017704702565888,0.0,0.1988941322545464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284613205434995,0.13326524871213868,0.0,0.06653179496769339,0.0,0.0,0.05621138199579316,0.0,0.07051744459595707,0.0,0.10420157372212437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529566869735744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04310029486589904,0.11805371972817055,0.0,0.062353924058727035,0.0,0.0,0.061516581905009825,0.0,0.1979692531588979,0.1864726657407617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024949860546497,0.0,0.034093030594084875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442577700596888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747806705840447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12852600947308565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3524328484297836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172485424622489,0.0,0.0,0.06909559534863048,0.0,0.0,0.04609151792640785,0.1912817047232073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061745834159692974,0.2177910091555454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04838573634815845,0.05032865875906626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884369183338447,0.1488880445937156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066477774729234,0.0,0.1809583303040356,0.1139562525194198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06249622691228821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054526576429645,0.0,0.0836080145350558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20757349774170605,0.06533161275565626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06698329303020087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050236467023564386,0.1290776756225167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727804007720569,0.0,0.06821866715625963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489895250824692,0.0,0.060078012739613225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362550486570136,0.0,0.0,0.03805070008235421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860768773895393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0563593458920254,0.07186913466305271,0.0,0.192445371696798,0.0517963609599887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001599984888014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662695936076347,0.0,0.04635526124412442,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lortender,2020/03/30,"GF has scary delusions (virus safety concerns) My girlfriend is having some scary delusions:

- She believes the coronavirus is a hoax, or at least that she is immune to it if she just believes hard enough that it won't hurt her.  She advises me to think hard too, so if she does get it, and gives it to me, I won't be hurt either.  When I mention that we contact others, she just kind of shrugs.

- She believes that she is a traveler between dimensions, and that she is in communication with other people via telepathy.  To demonstrate her status as a traveler, she showed me The Secret movie (which is full of woo woo nonsense), and when I demonstrated any disbelief she would say that I am just not on her plane yet, and needed to just believe.

I had noticed slight delusional behavior in the past, but this stuff is full-on.  It came on strong after she had an intense LSD trip, and I kinda figured it would wear off, but it has been persistent for weeks now.  I know there's not much I can do, but can anyone recommend strategies for keeping her safe during the pandemic?  Note that she is much smarter than I am, so I can't outwit her :)",6.793082191780819,6.4195627945205525,6.668139269406392,79.76056506849315,64.89041095890411,9.674429223744294,33.31849315068493,9.075114841892004,2.711194520547945,888,33,172,13,12,281,128,219,0.051,0.823,0.126,0.9517,1,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,1,0,0,2,12,5,0,0,8,0,25,2,1,0,0,32,32,16,0,5,13,0,2,0,2,4,1,1,0,0,19,8,0,2,4,3,0,4,5,2,0,0,4,3,33,3,20,23,7,18,0,2,0,0,27,7,0,5,7,137,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028614695374563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311598488430593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6646026351590886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866889952600048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12905390818906046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15237819516050113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704813313558095,0.1414687634708094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642122333883809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31574406123177906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13108005934682307,0.0,0.1535695933507389,0.08104685947238846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21681805758518727,0.10934876105331752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16789806695427098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14077889318744136,0.10223864879642576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172758054266081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16882037634443547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944942253614236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829329627821647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20952002668202827,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,glitteraariana,2020/03/30,"For those struggling in quarantine hi this is my first time posting in this sub! this is for anyone who’s struggling in self isolation during this pandemic. i’m struggling, too. it’s hard for me to feel good about myself when i’m all alone. things that have been helping me are giving myself things to do during the day instead of sleeping, binging, and eating. remember that you aren’t alone in this isolation. call a friend, send a text, or do something that you enjoy. not everything is cancelled :) remember to keep your head up",4.242121212121212,6.691835434343437,4.314141414141417,83.72454545454549,73.44444444444444,7.228282828282829,28.171717171717173,8.167268648758528,2.1153111111111107,424,17,74,7,9,131,68,99,0.168,0.672,0.161,0.1857,1,5,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,3,0,1,4,6,0,3,3,0,9,3,2,0,1,8,14,3,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,13,1,1,1,3,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,2,8,3,13,13,1,11,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,1,4,54,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3498200744685596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808569273816455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17244663254245665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891443141279933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17280767422496507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517795729015894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539143145997426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436503001761097,0.0,0.0,0.13047723046133294,0.0,0.0,0.16200627821191102,0.0,0.14164957524936586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15128442328592406,0.0,0.17332087894933546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319753822791605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501094096079875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16174154900521626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3826190568483566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617996949402884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16900320837085753,0.0,0.0,0.13001303269626893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5296540339504175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22439438918491975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847601169091992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shit_hit_z_fan,2020/03/30,"Self love in Self Isolation Hazel Hayes is an inspiration! I'm putting this here if people are interested or need it ♥️

 https://youtu.be/Aba__-FnhRQ",4.620000000000001,7.680995000000002,3.3520000000000003,79.93600000000002,99.0,8.4,25.0,8.238735603445708,3.035,125,5,20,4,5,36,24,25,0.084,0.588,0.32799999999999996,0.8356,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3361509546185119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761671924756462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582101555484966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3744154423860535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7770938228963473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thelordvader55,2020/03/30,"I feel a lack of identity My personality feels like it's super malleable and I can fit into whatever mold I need to depending on what I'm doing or who I'm interacting with. Whenever I think about how I would describe myself or any non-physical defining characteristics I have, I can't think of anything specific without feeling like I'm lying.",5.151818181818179,6.902557818181823,7.436787878787879,65.25518181818182,69.30303030303031,10.734545454545453,35.92727272727272,10.793553405168565,4.639312727272726,280,15,46,9,5,100,51,66,0.111,0.7090000000000001,0.18,0.652,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,0,16,14,4,0,3,3,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,9,3,8,13,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,3,2,31,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20668737997776992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501140088834978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4610385868326417,0.4342648816633791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969762405873629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22536521356583314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653858050377536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3895007327779706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29298413498254505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159079129231789,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThatHungryBoy,2020/03/30,Depressed and I don’t know why. I am 17 and a male. I have a family that loves me but I always find myself depressed randomly throughout the day and I don’t know why.,-1.4216666666666669,0.5007779444444438,1.5,94.99500000000002,102.88888888888887,4.622222222222223,17.11111111111111,6.42735559955562,0.010144444444444293,130,4,29,2,6,45,24,36,0.2,0.728,0.071,-0.6428,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,0,8,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,7,0,1,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,19,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499822777259892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937528454309819,0.0,0.517520770770412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832191771296238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745880724025136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.330217537618157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711502935220233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5421836698980663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WhatHappensNever,2020/03/30,"Really confused as to what i am feeling. I want to see if i am making any sense. I have recurrent moments where it feels like I and the things around me aren’t real. It feel like i am in a dream state. There are times when i feel i am outside of my body looking in. I don’t feel attached mind-body. It happens a lot in conversation, i can feel it happening i almost get dizzy or just a deja vu feeling. It makes me paranoid because i feel nothing is real. I get paranoid a lot lately. I look in the mirror a lot trying to match myself to my body. I hope i am making sense and I have no idea what any of it could be from. I do have diagnosed depression & GAD so idk if its byproducts of that. I am currently unmedicated but i am prescribed wellbutrin and lexapro, i was also hospitalized once for psychosis/si.",1.3064353645649902,3.439208407185632,3.5034519196900327,87.44136315604088,81.69461077844312,6.085100387460374,24.79358929200423,7.285733465282438,1.1868354350123291,632,25,131,9,17,216,96,167,0.079,0.848,0.073,-0.2241,3,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,7,0,19,3,2,3,0,31,39,11,0,5,5,0,8,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,4,0,0,9,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,11,26,3,15,36,3,12,0,1,3,0,1,6,0,9,7,95,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910472186136227,0.0,0.0,0.09511906436501352,0.0,0.12887521953295136,0.0,0.16177130114565716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588492178661453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250684627945234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3963582037696061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496669663283126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244585190811882,0.12072513655958975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4811312109995503,0.16994650315879353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428612651691096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21036266720874447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813772154413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13427272007901805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13417343525582262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621956031938326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19976514644159876,0.0,0.0,0.3033645000652571,0.0,0.0,0.2381871055151798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009901588347315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141294846410277,0.0,0.0,0.12667093280386804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707674587308356,0.07619824412247005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947825602552622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902076821713275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935690435969953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075482068324301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015595093048728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,duckssaywoof,2020/03/30,frustrated! i don’t know how to ask my parents for help. they don’t think mental illnesses are real and i’m so scared to tell them i want therapy or antidepressants bc i’ve been so depressed. but i can’t show my depression to them bc they r gonna say i’m crazy and that i’m overreacting so i hide it and pretend i’m fine all the time and that makes me mentally and physically exhausted to the point where i just don’t feel anything towards anyone anymore. I just don’t want to hide my emotions anymore and i wished they cared more bc i feel so empty and lonely,1.0703259452412013,3.362741000000004,3.1500000000000017,88.64565189048241,83.91525423728814,6.68161668839635,23.483702737940032,7.882392219407189,1.3267293350717084,450,17,96,9,13,152,69,118,0.27699999999999997,0.6409999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.9768,1,2,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,5,0,8,8,1,1,2,0,7,2,0,2,1,22,22,14,0,3,4,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,7,0,0,4,2,0,0,5,6,0,0,1,3,17,2,7,20,2,4,0,3,0,0,10,3,0,1,1,55,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3740289906444109,0.13185515521170452,0.0,0.15518013420203908,0.0,0.17629100688684474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192263512692272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32483660057496744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21212009490360398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906971147448009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263970141219389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363520502803676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587444686671329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3800759873755103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20938884056632026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782631524640985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21463821912314288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14996142008877394,0.1887952273699071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16482177504161427,0.0,0.21565052510132876,0.0,0.0,0.12083044899022845,0.0,0.0,0.10995887397575764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22245137490586545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21685051375506564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_MayBeSmall,2020/03/30,"Resources for my brother? Hi everyone,

I am very concerned for my brother and I don’t know where to go. (Below is some of the backstory)

Growing up, he’s always been a sensitive boy. For example, when he was around 10ish, my Dad caught him trying in his bed why did God create people with disabilities?. So life up to this point has been a continuation of this mentality. Since he is very kind and of course not everyone is this way, he has been taken advantage of and is having trouble coping.

He recently was laid off and it seems none of his friends are supporting him the way he’s supported them through rough times.

When he’s happy, the world is great, he’s dancing nonstop, he is everyone’s best friend. But when he’s experiencing a low, there is no one that can get to him and he’s been texting our Dad he no longer wants to live. 

He refuses to seek help as he told us he doesn’t need it. He only trusts our Dad for help and advice. It seems our Dad broke down and told me what my brother has been going through and he’s running out of life advice for my brother. 

Please, does anyone know where I locate resources or help for this? My brother is such a sweet man and deserves to always be happy. I want him to be able to overcome obstacles",2.7150181818181807,4.6445312800000025,3.993018181818183,86.67450909090911,76.19999999999997,7.105454545454546,25.363636363636363,8.00094639256281,1.45012,980,35,201,16,22,321,134,250,0.062,0.743,0.195,0.9881,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,4,0,1,2,9,15,0,0,7,0,27,2,0,0,0,24,43,16,0,3,3,9,1,0,2,0,2,0,1,2,9,12,0,1,4,1,0,6,6,3,0,1,12,3,22,12,32,29,3,27,0,2,0,0,48,13,0,4,6,123,31,0,0.12269799277764502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397981169782223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20418911824453587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579328942055997,0.0,0.0,0.10922722705719674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12876397355554794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737384032689938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35172957061801385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895923297089553,0.0,0.06410463705342348,0.0,0.13946419374377764,0.0,0.0,0.13527497019931978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261228589743416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24672563458851046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777107820208475,0.13486321600173848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333044181917776,0.0,0.0,0.10834457555409527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365071784397592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097900694400253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314333535514404,0.0933173524907074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506333907395701,0.0,0.0,0.13468555055414558,0.11598926267098435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211494654717824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233992888208773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149704755174002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27847245633414724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154618629976511,0.0,0.0,0.23448638041200925,0.0,0.08330388298824673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759057790612246,0.0,0.0,0.2024773880297661,0.14474091027126015,0.1947839110908653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11071585402988247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oscarthetraplord,2020/03/30,"Hearing things??? To give some insight I have been diagnosed throughout my life with (depression, anxiety, bipolar and ptsd) sometimes I hear voices but not voices??? It’s like my subconscious says something because it’s never a clear noise but I can still hear it. So I always have to check if anyone said something. It usually sounds like someone I know saying my name or one time it said my sisters name. Another time I was crying in my room and I thought I heard someone ask if I was okay so I I opened my door to see if someone was outside of it but there was no one. I’ve notice it usually happens if I’m having a hard time mentally and especially when there’s already a consistent low noise in the background. My mom who has a similar mental health history as me said she use to hear the radio playing but she’d go round the whole house but never find anything. Is it something with my mental health??? Spiritual maybe??? I’m open minded to suggestions of what it could be cuz it makes me feel crazy",2.5983673469387725,5.059480673469391,3.824857142857145,85.09514285714287,79.0,6.777142857142858,27.1469387755102,7.908726449838941,1.909733469387756,796,34,149,14,20,259,116,196,0.129,0.848,0.024,-0.9594,0,0,3,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,7,1,14,5,0,3,3,34,34,18,0,5,11,2,3,2,0,0,5,13,2,0,13,7,0,0,5,2,1,1,4,2,0,2,10,17,23,4,12,21,2,16,0,2,2,0,20,6,0,6,11,96,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202684708223552,0.0,0.08447051251805378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644972354000813,0.07766044425705848,0.0,0.0,0.0709832452411636,0.0,0.08354007475046546,0.0,0.09490495654545138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188399396713722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105329059347789,0.0,0.11151196939155042,0.0,0.0,0.08743668779918895,0.10303790615497588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05133018895233505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09278495827055733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738462899500457,0.057694611861468764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977139881579724,0.0,0.09093954627580453,0.0,0.0,0.21581625107630428,0.45766942766510205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713731555652257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05579124428098505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170465978462323,0.09919243407648012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776357524428887,0.0,0.10198775644725948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069166349108932,0.0,0.10250351733334427,0.11889581586770333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15659277524759513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155781004807744,0.0,0.0,0.13758147760839118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866827223372715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896985524098889,0.16146123739771215,0.0,0.0,0.08089613171727059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580457954332251,0.2344588943105045,0.1004031894879258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08107183399364731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744357249769667,0.0,0.0,0.08059338376221398,0.17758663372694325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767833876341458,0.22361389174717916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334042199350346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,journey-point,2020/03/30,"I had a bad trip/mental breakdown yesterday. I want to make sure I'm dealing with my aftercare correctly. So yesterday I was at my parents house (I helped them move a bed from my grandparents house to there house since my brother and his gf were moving out).

When I got to my parent's house I had some oatmeal since I hadnt had much that day.

 Ten minutes later, I'm resting at the table, when suddenly I began to tunnel vision and felt disconnected from reality (think the movie Get Out) and then suddenly a wave of deeply uncomfortable existential dread and disassociation swept over my body. I wanted to sleep but I was afraid I would die if I did. 

Then I remembered that 4 1/2 hours prior to my symptoms showing up I took  a 1:1 ratio CBD THC tincture (10mg).I took it because it helped with my aches and pains from rock climbing, using the THC as a catalyst for the CBD, but I hadnt had any for a few weeks. I knew THC  takes awhile to have an effect when ingested, but such an intense psychoactive reaction almost 5 hours later was not what I had bargained for, and in my delirium, I couldnt be sure if I was having a bad trip or just going insane. 

I started having a panic attack and sobbing uncontrollably and told my dad to drive me to urgent care. Despite the fact I knew I had consumed weed, I couldnt be sure this was definitively causing my sense of dissociation.  I was sobbing, utterly confused, lucid, and my speech was mixed with jibberish and stuttering. It was terrible I felt like I was dying or trapped in hell, and while I suspected the weed, I was still afraid I was maybe having some kind of mental breakdown. I was spasming in my legs and my balance and motor skills were failing. My dad was with me but he didnt feel there. The only thing that has ever felt so similar is when I was poisoned with spice bath salts when I was 19 (my friend told me it was weed, but lied) 

The doctor had wonderful bedside manner, and told me the first thing he was going to try was to give me an IV to dilute the fluid and then administer adavan. If that didnt work he was going to send me to ER for mental evaluation for 4 hours. I slowly regained my sense of being and control over my body, and my doctor sent me home with 6 more doses of adavan to be used as needed. 

While I'm feeling much better today, I'm wondering if I should schedule follow up with a psychiatrist, just in case this us the sign of a  bigger psychological. issue and not simply a one off bad trip. 

I wouldnt wish this kind of torture on my worst enemy. 

Thoughts?",5.175736829025844,5.719412186878728,6.187628603379724,78.69716855119286,68.28429423459244,8.991277335984096,29.23763667992048,9.017664075816787,2.292141202783301,2002,68,388,34,32,667,244,503,0.188,0.745,0.067,-0.9972,3,1,0,0,0,0,51.0,1,0,1,8,14,29,4,6,25,0,48,12,4,6,6,81,87,43,2,13,15,5,5,1,2,3,8,1,3,0,14,27,1,1,14,3,1,14,9,20,1,3,47,8,65,9,53,31,8,58,1,3,0,0,22,15,3,12,30,266,79,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148229370823651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055335743484868964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257238573378353,0.0,0.0,0.20382663792604502,0.049603609765171384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719669124268939,0.0,0.1807718735160184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296416684455551,0.08359144855605731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126560585452302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05247820173776944,0.08389094853728507,0.0,0.0,0.16890255703633486,0.0,0.0,0.16657535934338102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360562348351066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228824607914767,0.0,0.2343896133591829,0.0,0.0,0.06921497302557755,0.0,0.0,0.06286779753165568,0.0,0.04251350620883836,0.0780594273918301,0.13873673120625102,0.0,0.065080613782176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090838591412845,0.0,0.08162274051916256,0.0,0.2404050566868319,0.37556940444994863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493121633116851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694728112079439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039754243998860815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05431643511075775,0.0,0.08174910097628317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16400765381157248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17297109505312094,0.11963555069031755,0.060336299437502836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055139766268369736,0.061887065068316725,0.08658553438737314,0.09547249755304442,0.1807079300786174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09217860201602028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462350181231456,0.0,0.08143075576092929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057595513258519214,0.0,0.06498377623304638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300764124003436,0.08457665426689281,0.06118160952292372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811986870535054,0.05213988546008088,0.0,0.06460027062762798,0.0,0.0,0.07713113183204169,0.23326327035966596,0.18081454964761706,0.0552462397328562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788048476039043,0.1405585458232863,0.0,0.0,0.0959906158171051,0.0,0.06527170200137505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357377253529182,0.0,0.1764889038628339,0.059239777770544434,0.0,0.0,0.05780432693643633,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,magoojufoo22,2020/03/30,"Not doing well I’m going through a mix of the current situation we’re all experiencing, and being in upstate NY, and certain problems with my job. I really don’t have it as bad as some people and I realize that. I’m very grateful that I still have a job, and a roof over my head. I don’t have any kids or anyone to support but myself.

But I’m feeling a certain dread that I’m having a really hard time shaking. The uncertainty feeds onto my typical manic-mindset.

I’m just very, very scared. When it rains it poors. I’m terrified of how I might feel and what I might do.",1.7108556149732619,3.6001469915966378,4.296317799847213,83.5284950343774,79.08403361344537,7.016348357524827,25.10389610389611,8.00094639256281,1.5594302521008414,448,17,92,8,11,158,74,119,0.225,0.693,0.08199999999999999,-0.9604,3,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,3,7,0,11,2,1,1,3,22,21,12,0,1,5,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,7,6,1,0,3,0,1,2,3,5,1,0,0,4,10,4,10,18,2,9,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,4,4,61,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898700721204906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262671555308705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15837254765456435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918129932306813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10779792964240847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16991352389526526,0.0,0.1946635394924122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3764507268044169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40243509106061737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149829493137366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18149547364870064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430241555718456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18989997681900556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132051313744269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514764650434331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152434503038626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060230658335314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4695106889395082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17054259124383925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lurkingceviche,2020/03/30,"I am struggling with thoughts of hypothetical conflict I have researched  online about this and nothing really comes up. 

I constantly have (at least few times a day) thought of hypothetical conflict scenarios where i can legitimize my anger, inadequacy, fear, or whatever. Could be in traffic and someone cut me off and next thing you know the scenario in my head as escalated to a fist fight on the side of the road. Sometimes it can just be something popping in my head, like someone trespassing on my property and i just lose it on em. It gets me mentally and physically. My body get tense, and get pisssed off, i can really feel it. I am not the type of person that like to get in conflict in my regular life.  as a matter of fact I let things slide just so i dont have to argue. I also did some EMDR for being held at gun point a while ago (which i think got rid of most of my anger and other feelings from that situation) altho i had those kind of thought before that happen, they seem to be more frequent and get me more rattled emotionally. I am in a good place in my head and all but these scenario are just driving me nuts now. I catch myself in the mist of it now a lot of time but its almost like it feels good thinking about thise situation eventho it completely ruin the next 20min and get my body tense and all... any insight about understanding this would be greatly appreciated 

Thank you",5.815090080312573,6.404993044280445,6.4329628825700045,77.33441067940092,66.89667896678965,9.476101584545258,32.54634252224875,9.478462496947786,2.861287215107445,1109,45,214,21,17,363,154,271,0.126,0.7909999999999999,0.083,-0.7972,0,0,1,1,1,0,24.0,0,2,1,1,12,17,5,2,12,0,21,6,5,0,3,47,43,20,0,2,8,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,19,13,0,4,12,0,0,4,2,9,0,0,7,3,31,8,38,28,9,36,0,2,0,0,6,21,0,6,14,155,50,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571359707826517,0.0,0.10812167553528353,0.0,0.0,0.0863478160543862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342691314014764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187903568851036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398724552869152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301116840904493,0.11321005777009208,0.11668295071594086,0.0,0.08620949866240041,0.0,0.0,0.06963514209950017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265462586603316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145769018923863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150224219152796,0.16378668244407465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3384758564091309,0.0,0.0,0.18112913363038996,0.08635771879703784,0.11904315998954496,0.0,0.0,0.09548220966065296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3324414554955543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243966923101877,0.0593404063425188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104120695884922,0.07626615436002752,0.15825384664008912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079675239660953,0.0,0.09179674696457096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881371598481067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296659333661702,0.0,0.0,0.10360522164461217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942798755164981,0.11281121712966195,0.0,0.10207156824996128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834349635538118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829666656540127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24273754389428814,0.0,0.0,0.1829742588145972,0.0831246685049279,0.10679034208830226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11287923751788045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940915811362028,0.0,0.0,0.14346799569653856,0.13837243704375146,0.0,0.2571610045233371,0.12592254265183428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240610521834768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670256195702864,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,avtduskduvddu,2020/03/30,"Drank too much tonight. Should I skip the abilify? I drank too much tonight, and I don't wanna fuck my liver by taking abilify too. What happens if I skip it for a day? I'm on 2mg",-1.1804999999999986,0.7862719500000033,1.6900000000000013,97.195,92.0,5.2,20.5,6.742157984588678,0.2718500000000001,138,5,34,2,5,48,29,40,0.0,0.9059999999999999,0.094,0.4956,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,2,0,2,4,1,0,0,4,8,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,4,5,2,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,3,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949948697759849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4228728480957695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4044906229173872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6725053932453695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34391919570884244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FierceMango,2020/03/30,"Feeling upset about a friend I lost I just need to get this off my chest. 

A few months ago I had a falling out with someone who was one of my very close friends. I found out she was saying awful things about me (and a few other things that I won’t get into) so I cut her off and blocked her from all forms of social media. Initially it felt good to cut her out of my life but lately I’ve been feeling very upset about what happened. She was one of my best friends, and I don’t even have a lot of friends to begin with. Part of me wants to make up with her, but I know I won’t be able to get past what she did. I guess what I’m asking is, what can I do to get my mind off this?",3.0656286549707588,2.485230855263161,4.1940350877193,95.07435672514623,72.68421052631578,7.018713450292399,23.46783625730994,5.033348758259628,0.02513801169590613,518,10,135,1,9,170,83,152,0.1,0.7440000000000001,0.156,0.9141,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,6,11,2,2,5,1,14,2,1,1,1,27,32,6,0,2,3,0,3,0,4,2,1,1,0,0,12,11,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,5,0,2,9,4,25,6,27,20,7,15,0,1,0,0,15,9,0,2,5,100,37,0,0.15476924121743293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719359409759802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446883482264737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624207701543156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022236241606367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156511957309823,0.0,0.1486027426268294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696964845351448,0.4782973273715451,0.0,0.3234421626849929,0.0,0.0,0.12981309655626885,0.0,0.0,0.1704957680395424,0.0,0.13686192887530751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505712740777094,0.0,0.17458644536690626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931809214210778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689489094469258,0.13157927428262028,0.0,0.0,0.10330967031549036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15627281387840353,0.0,0.12353533175506445,0.0,0.0,0.11475943128879182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20975128661675546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16760000608602466,0.1477447532467145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12307871259858445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776775087103925,0.13113547583835974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20564361353478453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25540166550111754,0.09128690840281174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slimeman55,2020/03/30,"Nothing makes me as happy as I once was I don’t feel close to as happy doing the things that used to make me feel joy. It started with small things like movies and some tv shows, but now I can’t even do my favorite thing, listing to music. I don’t know what to do. I’ve talked to some friends, my therapist, and my family about it and they all didn’t help this. I know the term is depression but it’s so weird to put a name on it like that. The only people that help are my therapist and my friend tucker, but I can’t see either of them whenever I want to so I’m stuck here hurting, I’ve started to think of self harm. If I cut myself things will be visable and more people will try to help me. I don’t have the energy to dig into my faith either, and I think that could help but I don’t know how to get started because I can’t talk to my priest because of the whole thing going on. I can’t go on like this and a cry for attention like this to me feels like I’m getting desperate. Please someone respond if you read this far with anything that you think would be helpful I don’t know how to keep living like this.",2.6806834268977298,3.3625423112033235,3.942143031486456,92.04920185501592,74.02074688796681,6.998389065169637,23.305101293629484,7.048011613610866,0.5536461313155967,871,22,204,8,17,286,119,241,0.105,0.6559999999999999,0.24,0.9876,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,2,2,0,8,17,1,0,7,0,23,0,0,5,1,43,49,20,0,5,8,0,3,6,2,3,0,0,0,1,20,11,0,1,11,3,0,3,10,5,0,0,3,4,30,12,28,40,8,15,2,2,1,0,16,7,0,4,11,135,50,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768381552432933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299071069096197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507368231674672,0.0,0.11704316739109555,0.0,0.0,0.09177370771983592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07037707132826307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044842816203564,0.0,0.16162878112221596,0.07612128953201305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16464474528729706,0.0,0.11133880421848094,0.0,0.12111274064141588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268547186802831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35710023470737884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406689813876447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947089596504651,0.0,0.0,0.2342343688831535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31233768165581466,0.0,0.09408801016764833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224954547233346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022402153974485,0.0,0.0,0.11347517685896537,0.0,0.08103815041095362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14774048946619492,0.0,0.0,0.11696289717473328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711492079835726,0.0,0.0,0.10658156178335122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849087280723253,0.0,0.11115773265383808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902817798969776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22625570600032194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17128609179827203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474318574326256,0.3539444863350937,0.20482405534951245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234230739765432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202734501465193,0.0,0.0,0.06284755913080987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189623145922864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756920001862721,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lavenderkiddo1,2020/03/30,"[Question] I’m trying improve my mental health, but even if I have a good day I ALWAYS feel super depressed at night. Advice? I’m been in counseling for my anxiety and depression for awhile and I’ve been getting a lot better. I even have a therapy and daily gratitude journal that I’m working on each day. I feel like In the day I do good, and as soon as the day turns into the night, I start to feel super depressed for no reason. Even if I’m not thinking about the past or people I miss and my day was perfect. I always find myself sad and listening to sad songs at night. I almost always end up crying myself to sleep. I don’t know why at all, and I want to get better. Has any one else struggled with this? What did you do to cope/get better?",1.391569892473118,3.3758684580645197,3.361290322580647,89.36860215053764,80.54838709677419,5.681720430107527,20.655913978494624,6.742157984588678,0.40899139784946215,581,16,120,6,15,196,89,155,0.18600000000000005,0.575,0.239,0.9079,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,7,5,16,0,1,7,0,10,2,1,1,2,28,26,13,0,3,5,0,3,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,10,0,0,8,1,0,0,3,7,0,1,4,5,17,9,20,22,3,20,0,6,0,0,3,8,0,6,13,78,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151378779131951,0.0,0.0,0.11798538539663735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941211807319249,0.0,0.0,0.08012549382384132,0.0,0.09013631258272907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31262168179372785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294259622894052,0.3799390379904916,0.0,0.3044492224347483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842822553432888,0.0,0.10435856825526174,0.0,0.0,0.2334682250011509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17872859216554254,0.08417467988943662,0.0,0.0,0.10769052484386604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846771434505567,0.0,0.0,0.19765315818627588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12524317400926052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475390505422199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05756366918379259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017116840959532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874055922041775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3317142196269417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984172116152018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247793119243228,0.08168548170939509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319917124628417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114440928566905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791075906619353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339761339139404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317696961216232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13474391857020762,0.0,0.0,0.07549792967993403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999589346289072,0.12816049096335916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949663102388147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631933765773008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577848871186503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tossitthrowit2019,2020/03/30,"Don’t even know how to begin to stop my self hatred I know, deep down, that hating myself so much is not healthy. But I just feel like I deserve to suffer so intensely. I feel like I shouldn’t even try to help myself because, in fact, I should be trying to feel worse. When I saw a therapist, who I didn’t like, she mostly glossed over when I expressed these feelings to her and just told me “don’t think that way” or “well, that’s not true” or “don’t tell yourself that”. Told me to write affirmations or whatever. But that’s bullshit. It’s bullshit. I know that I technically need to stop with my self-hatred, but having me write “I am valid.” Is not going to make me feel better because it’s just not true. I won’t write it. I just don’t know how to help my self hatred when I just believe so fully that I should suffer.",3.2404385964912272,4.026200251461987,4.25171052631579,89.96072368421055,72.80116959064327,6.8695906432748535,23.606725146198826,6.816661863887847,0.5715181286549709,637,16,142,5,12,207,80,171,0.19699999999999998,0.71,0.09300000000000001,-0.9505,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,16,10,1,0,1,0,14,0,0,3,3,43,32,15,0,4,15,0,5,3,0,4,0,0,0,2,12,2,0,2,10,0,0,1,11,3,1,0,4,6,27,7,14,23,2,12,0,2,1,0,14,4,0,4,9,97,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752205994269992,0.0,0.0,0.16192307961279725,0.0,0.12710854708002256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898512393572792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633454266746864,0.205347009848124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167931500545224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141893618700232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19266480077793366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159387311324364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21064280894750048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593413023669888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565064218096104,0.106566463657543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44979351037589776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403124958661234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561750241039193,0.0,0.0,0.16686984803242502,0.0,0.0920898905101981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746609924171354,0.0,0.19515271747169627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407814439607457,0.0,0.0,0.1292214245511033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14646282740185687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hereforthe100,2020/03/30,"Emotional Issues With Parents I’m seventeen, almost eighteen, and I’m usually pretty good at containing my emotions. I don’t have the greatest relationship with my parents but I still live at home and we get along for the most part. When I argue with my mom which is quite often, I usually end up crying out of anger and frustration. And the. She belittles me for crying. However, when I argue with my dad or when he is in a bad mood and even snaps at me, I cry. I’m not sure why. It confuses me, even. Does anybody know why I’m like this?",0.6546920052424632,3.109245091743123,3.0354193971166445,87.1673623853211,88.90825688073393,6.784010484927918,22.464613368283096,7.957251820313856,1.555853997378768,421,16,85,10,14,144,71,109,0.294,0.621,0.085,-0.9856,3,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,1,7,10,4,1,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,22,10,10,0,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,12,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,15,3,14,10,3,13,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,5,8,58,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480635337501497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345951048704902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4872620097267346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939599338973745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326521665802522,0.1309628166322083,0.0,0.0,0.19532436324400707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07725236581985476,0.0,0.0,0.12402055118756852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14831874319729793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15433065815156466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126169164272645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223844077234193,0.0,0.13056582440871756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17317547316191714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283689435636302,0.16012132585419664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504299282908224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572706054276455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587496309073224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808366097236213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935921986737154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3257006247552444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668468944125267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mr_Bakey_Cakey,2020/03/30,"Do i need therapy Its hard to put into words but i'll try my best to speak

Over the course of a year, (maybe longer) i have been getting sad and lonely and feeling like, undesirable and stuff. And seeing my best bud, hanging out with new peopIe was heart stopping for me. i just sorta isolated and really introverted myself, it was a ruff freshman year and then comes my sophomore year when that i decided to stop being a pussy and talk to people, i then made a couple friend but it never went any futher than small-talk, but my it fixed my anxiety and i wasnt introverted as much anymore, but i feel stuck in the past i think, and my depression still there for some reason, and i've just been fighting it and i gave into it again and there i was, back where i never wanted to go back too. I feel stupid, unwanted, lonely and i hate myself.

The mind is a funny place huh?",2.731961904761904,4.544163605714292,3.929142857142861,87.6721904761905,75.80000000000003,6.9523809523809526,21.38095238095238,7.793537801064563,0.8066380952380952,681,17,141,10,15,222,108,175,0.23399999999999999,0.645,0.121,-0.9639,0,4,0,0,2,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,11,11,3,0,8,1,10,1,1,2,2,42,25,21,0,3,6,0,4,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,8,18,0,2,6,0,0,5,3,7,0,0,10,6,22,4,16,14,4,28,0,4,1,0,6,7,0,2,17,100,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09993568782566103,0.0,0.11242157728010826,0.0,0.14574169280452767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22600147151683636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30844426567288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265903017424274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626049438394363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265737074848088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22291737547907506,0.10498599298183273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353848692985145,0.0,0.07677888137569737,0.0,0.08351895650455858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164445976671232,0.14508945095472495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741445581965168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179568697945941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13905411146444316,0.0,0.0,0.1476378940752498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14838451164701022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803018350975838,0.10896663179000513,0.22668434300649906,0.14193182792786166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14028692844796506,0.1018813664717766,0.0,0.15353861542272226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773220990241556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09414431216857533,0.15109610300578769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710557170407075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11735991903920312,0.2457249903283949,0.0,0.0,0.16823041807309147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362366762567295,0.0,0.0,0.16805794934934726,0.0,0.0,0.09416400663396099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977404512499292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667894937667424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362304592436745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2839061525907125
mentalhealth,anonymousforpersonal,2020/03/30,"Can you roll over when you OD? Please help My sister tried to OD ages ago and Ik she won’t do it again but I have an irrational fear that she will sometimes and I can’t sleep rn bcos I’m worried she has but I don’t want to wake her up bcos I’m 99% sure she’s just sleeping, I checked on her and she was breathing normally and stuff, she rolled over at one point, like how one does when they sleep, does this mean she’s just asleep? Because I heard that you don’t tend to roll over etc when you overdose but I’m not sure, can you roll over etc when you overdose? Please lmk",-0.3826933333333322,1.7221083840000018,0.5928000000000004,105.65506666666668,89.16,3.9733333333333336,16.333333333333336,5.2151,-1.1428666666666665,448,10,115,2,15,137,71,125,0.079,0.784,0.13699999999999998,0.6586,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,6,1,0,8,4,0,1,1,0,11,6,6,1,2,16,18,12,2,2,6,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,5,1,0,2,2,1,22,3,10,14,2,15,0,0,0,0,19,8,0,0,8,69,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14467452431287378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949041185413517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285649788452586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640413312820013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18365498349866735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10939524486204866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973544923687224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777819475643035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15990971789832864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211886627425532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583079352129077,0.15428482507409108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4899792252984446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16141742045491014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18683473234544684,0.0,0.0,0.30764423712975114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11080788616866824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626462617324856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1657461958956064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,careless_confusion,2020/03/30,"what can I do it is extremely difficult for me to actually go to therapy because of things such as not having enough money to pay for it or not knowing how to tell my parents I need therapy (I'm 17). I know I need to talk to a professional because I feel like there are things that are not okay with me, and things that just make my daily life hard to live. And now that the quarantine is on things are just getting uglier.

I just want to be better but I really don't know how to start. If anyone knows about something such as free online therapy, books or whatever you might think that might help, please let me know because I  don't want to be living this way anymore.",6.535535714285714,5.460743919117651,7.0842016806722725,78.87676470588238,65.69117647058823,10.712605042016806,31.92857142857143,9.957137785484203,2.7726483193277307,527,17,110,10,7,174,83,136,0.055999999999999994,0.818,0.126,0.889,2,1,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,10,5,0,0,2,1,15,1,0,3,0,29,31,10,0,5,10,1,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,12,3,0,0,7,1,3,1,5,1,0,0,0,2,14,5,18,26,1,5,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,5,3,80,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.12988561589589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13199863800722084,0.0930660528329064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434081042289541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117715423023783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13752704953845116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729895288290955,0.09508609250219334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953883665193147,0.0,0.0756433405859518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192307366273611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921358573585587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3657391874819999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13610294606481818,0.0940118986277547,0.06502554426063993,0.0,0.2350580578219409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884474712878368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823944277762909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973827352726915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779090637357467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14610294870798285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526675341314897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246626402663912,0.0,0.0,0.09420829626928476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698009235786893,0.11633456423761165,0.0,0.456631592378029,0.0,0.3537007675535631,0.08528459074272272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15701070903524453,0.10564794684418742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trash_bagzs,2020/03/30,I want to rip my eyes out and I don’t know why 15f A couple of months ago I stoped going to school my whole life fell apart and my friends have decided to leave. I started online school and in total isolation the stress of being alone has caused me to want to mutilate my body we’re it be tearing off a limb or gouging out my eyes. If anyone know what this is or can give me advice that would be greatly appreciate,1.764741379310344,3.6462406896551727,3.1638936781609215,91.74859913793104,78.88505747126436,6.189080459770117,21.219827586206893,7.1686216300943375,0.4684724137931031,328,9,72,4,8,107,64,87,0.098,0.8029999999999999,0.098,-0.0018,0,2,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,3,0,9,4,3,1,1,16,16,6,0,4,3,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,11,2,11,12,2,10,0,0,2,0,2,5,0,3,3,46,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028614561573823,0.18402227867117726,0.0,0.0,0.21500795863029126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451566996413665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23059354762444734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132593782284356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297022116507106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603889828898119,0.0,0.0,0.1991460279490887,0.11798220011563895,0.0,0.0,0.2288765048040199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281798433193274,0.0,0.0,0.2198153246374282,0.0,0.0,0.14663195135529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16570200230919396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4201986399625041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469382760848134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378017446223205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448922634854505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873240678553776,0.2317747172116614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14747100372487013,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,howcaniserviceyou,2020/03/30,I’m not ok... My anxiety has taken over my life. My mind is constantly racing and it is manifesting physically. I don’t want to be around people. I just wanna curl up and die already if it’s going to happen. It’s so bad that I woke up at 4am the other day and drove myself to the hospital because I thought i couldn’t breathe. I had to take a job at a gas station to be able to afford rent and I’m scared of people. I can’t take this much longer. The what if’s of life are becoming more of a reality for me every single day that passes. I don’t think I’m going to make it through this.,0.9640909090909132,2.2751354230769247,3.9052447552447553,88.11339160839161,79.38461538461539,6.881118881118883,21.81818181818182,7.686295010490155,0.7736153846153848,455,13,106,7,11,164,80,130,0.096,0.88,0.024,-0.8879,3,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,6,1,11,3,1,1,0,16,26,7,1,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,10,5,0,0,2,0,1,4,5,2,0,0,5,0,13,1,19,18,3,13,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,2,3,71,23,1,0.20354370700514546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246155421150863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557103787353107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18119705300643849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16995049332297502,0.12407835456595158,0.22479803277029312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21995843704589746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26253770453514075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112462324643664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714943519199337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313571587151856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17999302789123478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20198572189338415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28753787952057697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358670049687223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20552112028673927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962804468787644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822231557891205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20378275919893224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060790726819678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042258871422818,0.0,0.16159096730938405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005535202723824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tannm-art,2020/03/30,"I'm scared to go back to work after COVID-19 I, like many others, suffer from generalized anxiety disorder and depressive episodes. Although i thought i had been doing really well, and I'd even been able to reduce a medication, this pandemic is messing things up. 

Ive never really liked standard 9-5 office work, but before the  pandemic, i hadnt had the option to explore working from home. I was scared I wouldnt be productive if i was stuck inside all day, everyday, but ive actually been mord productive in the past couple of weeks than i have in a very long time. On top of that, my parents always repeated that we all have to work, we all have to make money, and we rarely like the job thats handed to us.

I love being out of work. I love that I can do what I need to do throughout the day. I can focus on my individual needs, my artwork, and do household daily chores without stressing about what I'm going to do next. But, now im thinking about what's to come, and struggling to pay bills, and dreading going back to work. 

I guess Id just like advice. Im 23, I know i have a lot of time ahead of me. Im just scared that ill never get to feel like this again. I dont want things to go back to how they were.",5.304684120660212,4.733048498007972,6.492979510529313,80.44387450199207,68.00398406374502,9.561866818440523,29.88076266363119,9.04235418022936,2.210625270347183,947,30,201,15,14,321,137,251,0.139,0.747,0.114,-0.3498,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,4,0,1,8,12,17,0,6,8,0,27,5,1,2,5,39,47,12,0,5,7,1,2,5,0,1,2,0,2,0,13,11,0,0,5,0,3,6,6,9,1,0,11,2,28,8,34,33,4,32,0,2,0,2,8,7,0,4,24,135,41,8,0.09990810383562927,0.0,0.09749589742633323,0.0,0.0,0.097629042775236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313154586257207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07642942597375077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304694946711677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501443778457038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606198498630703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054641661161838,0.0,0.12886492356553933,0.0,0.08605070343684885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450334262782395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709155361862647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598836032766478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050516539201931776,0.07137436934275661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052197860699198365,0.0,0.22712031117177806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006004011416767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100215974156004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237536893775224,0.0,0.09914337698354203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05490688104542274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24405026490417744,0.0,0.0,0.08841552796985189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493829713344908,0.1803419287689168,0.0,0.06668943510942306,0.101291136092366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064690374878624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816118612626414,0.15411057763453986,0.0,0.1062534018619178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109361259825138,0.0,0.0953735899486954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800737922062505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30007632314729266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444439538946595,0.10444564250399103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327490096388291,0.06401707882544992,0.0,0.0793158746019969,0.11651443757248728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017714755389194,0.0,0.0,0.08243464888746949,0.05892838817196708,0.0,0.08014025453301835,0.0,0.08982938382914919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630784686854714,0.0,0.4364057369526714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwayayayaysya,2020/03/30,"What’s wrong with me? Is it normal to think about killing people a lot? I imagine myself stabbing and shooting anyone I dislike. I’ve never tortured animals, I actually love them and it makes me sick when I see them hurt or in pain but some humans I could just unload a whole magazine on.  I think about it a lot, just me killing and beating the people I hate. I literally fantasize about it. I have depression, ADHD, anger problems, but I feel like it’s all part of another bigger mental illness. Can someone please tell me what’s wrong with me?",3.021037735849056,5.315639216981137,4.3515471698113215,82.74392452830193,76.64150943396227,6.881509433962264,27.581132075471697,7.908726449838941,1.940527547169812,431,18,79,7,10,142,70,106,0.38,0.5379999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.9914,0,0,0,1,0,0,13.0,0,0,2,1,6,13,5,0,4,0,4,4,0,1,2,23,11,7,2,3,5,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,11,0,0,0,2,18,2,9,10,6,5,0,2,1,1,5,3,0,4,3,58,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.16209687737844594,0.0,0.19962883526365768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17417810954176902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614616791934512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262325592048738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430680745707405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398890083335235,0.1186671716526181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399668462828024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17782142505115947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675464913487914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811516933709762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28243717117590145,0.149918428803302,0.0,0.11087799046660404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673972071131744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12811227992656166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275000038406395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767500027712154,0.0,0.0,0.1798781451945321,0.0,0.2303159356772805,0.0,0.0,0.1823360623729904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15894236444817395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13236610507927166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074227509812398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14518520364267515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21286985094600488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854529986644365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3632247682798818,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,roomtwentyone,2020/03/30,"Has anyone had a similar experience? Before I start, I’d just like to say that I’ve had hallucinations for a few years, except before they were mostly auditory but over the past few weeks I’ve been having visual ones too. I don’t know if this counts as a hallucination or not, I don’t remember ever experiencing something like this before today.

This morning at around 4:30, I messaged my long distance boyfriend and I was absolutely freaking out. I don’t remember what I was doing beforehand and I don’t really remember what happened afterwards either; I remember crying afterwards, but other than that I remember nothing. I actually completely forgot about this conversation until a few hours after it happened, when I went back to read the messages over again.

I asked him if he knew if my hair was always this short. I told him that I had been asleep since Thursday and then I started rambling on and on about how someone cut my hair in my sleep. After he tried telling me that my hair has been the same length for a few months now and that I haven’t been sleeping that whole time, I then tried insisting to him that I was asleep during that whole conversation that I just had with him. I told him that I was scared and that I wished he had been there with me, and he told me that he loved me, and apparently that calmed me down enough for him to change the subject because there were a few normal-sounding messages after that before I apparently stopped altogether.

First of all, I’ve had shoulder length hair for about 4 years now, way before I met him. Second of all, I was literally messaging him and other people days prior to this, I don’t know why I didn’t just look at the time stamps while this was happening and I don’t know why I also seemingly forgot everything that I did in those days too. Lastly, I have no idea why I was so fixated on the idea that I had been asleep for all those days and I don’t know where I got that thought from, and I don’t know why I was trying to insist to him that I was also asleep during that convo.

Somebody please tell me if they’ve ever gone through something similar. I don’t know what that was, that’s never happened to me and it’s honestly maybe one of the strangest things that’s ever happened to me. I considered the thought that it was maybe sleep exhaustion but I got a good 11 hour night sleep the night before, so I don’t think so. Please help",6.7451390469995145,6.390581276955601,6.972230443974631,77.47763010245568,64.98308668076109,10.152187347536184,31.511546592941947,9.661875296680813,2.6857601886485614,1916,63,376,34,26,620,194,473,0.053,0.8740000000000001,0.07400000000000001,0.8838,2,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,1,1,26,10,1,1,16,0,45,15,13,1,7,63,77,33,0,5,14,0,4,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,41,17,0,3,18,1,0,2,15,4,0,4,42,7,66,6,43,35,14,58,0,0,1,1,31,14,0,7,43,278,107,1,0.0,0.0,0.06581237229511211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786457002600314,0.05611604580500087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715608941628478,0.0,0.0,0.060036500763516125,0.0630479291514647,0.0,0.0,0.051857717730895016,0.0,0.04111121072355347,0.0,0.34432229320204844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134329392720569,0.0,0.07071026669799405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408041688920339,0.13048097226682562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968424734674007,0.0,0.0,0.18301186013243487,0.0,0.0,0.06061133186713024,0.06596992293498911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736500538469948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656604014720775,0.10787694040347193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981878396233002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04520406418934213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283096386531718,0.0,0.0,0.15226463079963146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223817940434973,0.05497315292364842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06589621642174373,0.0,0.0,0.059682876890460285,0.05663318329230271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06086784403172665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355064493333217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05383050494159209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05201440767065396,0.0,0.0,0.12657701357265835,0.06607754442609573,0.06471114844471608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139909619634523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437975724637597,0.04675487384282516,0.0,0.0,0.14805922253147194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674589273821526,0.0,0.04320422458880799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3819857012043494,0.0,0.0,0.05363153320281815,0.06751988277537492,0.0,0.0,0.061395459425333226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05578762490824566,0.0,0.2699575273101468,0.0,0.057142266749491785,0.1038382559807966,0.0,0.0,0.09546971655940817,0.0,0.0,0.056383425746533336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789224849243063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04480458908929612,0.04321326267179017,0.0,0.10708072864631443,0.07865040217789733,0.0,0.06392587614298383,0.19332737087522964,0.0,0.13736337823559744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05353127027935885,0.054096843112164686,0.0,0.0,0.0625181832170715,0.2434188849825031,0.15059021479918697,0.07755345022485281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868591696877029
mentalhealth,livingtheloserlife,2020/03/30,"I feel like I need to watch what I tell my therapist because I don't want to get hospitalized I went to therapy from 2016 to 2017. I quit because my former therapist suggested hospitalization for me and I also realized I didn't want to change. I'm going back to therapy on April 8th. I'm going for somewhat different issues than before. Due to these issues, I'm deathly afraid of getting hospitalized. I really do not want to get hospitalized and I feel like I really need to watch what I tell my therapist in order to avoid it. I don't know whether to be honest and let my therapist do whatever they want or to tone things down. I feel like the chances of me going to a psych ward is high.",3.490987573577499,5.081052971223024,5.552570307390454,77.76017004578159,73.24460431654677,9.658862001308043,27.74427730542839,10.018931242160765,2.8839151079136687,549,21,108,16,11,191,73,139,0.055999999999999994,0.846,0.099,0.8182,1,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,2,6,0,2,2,0,8,0,0,0,0,19,28,6,1,6,3,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,5,0,0,4,4,2,0,0,2,5,21,4,22,24,1,13,0,0,2,0,4,4,0,2,7,67,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657026110965747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928555751089756,0.0,0.14722611338090436,0.0,0.1027563043557982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12774612685726916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616658060521185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18317687015901535,0.25880897211738874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892734716773669,0.0,0.20588894452807766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758763165405282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520803010979725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636552951427106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348340556873574,0.0,0.17698901940977108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17908129880110346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12844117314372833,0.0,0.0,0.15472154567809096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21109591809384806,0.0,0.2761949722492174,0.5608381490901473,0.080226359150575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28490517836697443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194402899707576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EveOculis,2020/03/30,"i cannot cry when i feel sad i cannot cry i have been told for such a huge part of my life that feeling sad is bad and that crying is bad and it makes me turn my sadness into anger, i want to beat something to death, some of my friends dont even believe me when i tell them i have anxiety attacks and one of them is still mad at me because he thinks i pretended to want to kill myself to get his attention even though i was about to break my window and jump out, fuck this fuck everything i just want to cry and to meet new people who dont think everything i say is a lie, but i cant. there is no one and there is no time and there is no time for me. i am not worth more than anyone else and since the people who kept me afloat hate me now and the others are busy keeping other people afloat i guess ill just scream till i become an adult and then i can scream independently. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck",3.6993076923076944,3.6062100717948766,4.483910256410258,91.85817307692308,71.35897435897436,7.730769230769233,23.429487179487186,7.1686216300943375,0.5010256410256408,704,14,171,6,12,227,108,195,0.314,0.595,0.091,-0.9951,0,0,1,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,2,1,14,20,12,0,5,0,19,9,0,2,0,30,41,16,2,3,4,0,2,0,1,0,2,3,1,1,8,12,0,2,5,1,1,1,9,19,0,2,4,5,30,1,19,37,3,15,0,3,0,7,12,4,7,2,9,115,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319522496590425,0.0,0.0,0.06690194286088824,0.09803585114378692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885023939959004,0.0,0.0,0.15977823306161698,0.0583258685106167,0.10567145693277404,0.0,0.10779901770927157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42040159641573066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242733737570162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992867585267077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12639197057356993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17198270303969404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967577449202412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392242035897231,0.619184754228833,0.049989046861727435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540272013399248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09446456151696148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504511352398188,0.10585615868107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675818784485269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06386739326499408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240870237140868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967099661900827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361252211165503,0.0,0.19899817417136248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608887450785262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791477949116623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365942717466396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641047104909032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362886500993948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226162417574122,0.0940054826155112,0.0,0.11158399217629876,0.0,0.0,0.09142669857941876,0.0,0.0,0.10407277265967553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16930429245693784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashhleyy3,2020/03/30,"Anyone have RAD or know someone who does? My girlfriend has RAD (reactive attachment disorder) we’ve been going through a hard time and I was curious if anyone has it or knows someone who has it so I have someone to talk to about my situation. 
Thanks in advance",3.2578,5.818245180000003,4.594000000000001,79.93700000000003,77.2,8.0,32.0,8.841846274778883,3.1655999999999995,209,11,37,5,5,69,37,50,0.027999999999999997,0.8270000000000001,0.146,0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,6,11,5,0,1,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,4,1,5,9,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,3,1,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504129081437606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.287178344268603,0.0,0.21927810380992285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424063992701115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244641729714778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754167140574995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816545286691543,0.0,0.0,0.6369290196920283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20140107018353187,0.0,0.23069393489523565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14611111997932028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,svprio,2020/03/30,"I'm not sure if i have a mental problem - strange type of laziness Hello everyone, this corona quarantine situation is forcing me to ask this here because i don't know if i maybe need to seek professional help. I cannot fight this problem on my own. It's long but i will be thankful if someone reads it.  
My problem is unique. I am not a classical lazy person- i have excellent results in university(computer engineering) + i do strength training almost everyday and i have been on internships and always got great feedback from employers. I am not antisocial and have solid number of friends.  
BUT, when there is nothing  forcing me i can spend 24h doing nothing and contacting no one. Since this outbreak i just sit home and do nothing. I waste whole days. I hear other people watch movies, play videogames, read books but i cannot do even that.   
This behavior did not start with corona outbreak. I am always like that i will just do what i must and then do nothing. Even playing game or watching movie or party with friends it always feels like 'let's just get this over with and return to sleep or do nothing'   
i don't have a hobby. my hobby is sleeping, watching porn movies and doing nothing. I always postpone all my duties until final moment, then i start working hard and somehow i always manage to get great results. Weight training is only thing i do regularly and don't try to evade it.  
I am always late, but if i know i must not be late like exam or work day, i am never late and even come earlier. But if it is meeting with friends or normal day at university i am always late. I tell myself i won't be late and leave in time but like magic i still don't leave in time it's impossible to explain.  
At night i always promise myself - tomorrow you will read a book, watch movie, work on your skills...  
But the next day some force just won't let me do anything. It's a feeling like i am sleepy. i always feel sleepy no matter how much i sleep.  I cannot do anything productive. Everything feels very boring and pointless. I have friends who are similar to me but the difference is they are also poor in school have no job no money and usually do drugs or alcohol. I don't do any of that.  
Somedays i am forced by turn of events to have full productive and social day and i feel very happy in the night, i promise myself i will make more of my days like that but then next morning again same story. i feel like doing nothing.  


Is this some mental problem and should i seek help? i feel powerless.",3.1305605131065235,5.260761854805729,4.2363427216954825,84.48472044060236,75.64621676891616,6.65404350250976,26.65555865402491,7.604176662624187,1.5664106339468304,1973,76,374,27,44,642,216,489,0.067,0.7390000000000001,0.195,0.9961,3,1,2,0,1,0,50.0,0,2,1,6,15,28,1,0,8,0,65,7,3,4,5,84,88,44,0,14,29,0,9,7,4,9,2,1,1,1,22,22,2,1,10,8,3,1,20,6,0,1,3,14,60,22,31,71,9,49,0,0,4,1,21,12,0,15,42,261,82,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613213485325682,0.057457386914956575,0.0,0.0,0.04588645016585348,0.4296998587847064,0.0,0.0,0.03902009969210666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443705331284576,0.0,0.05364218590722632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0349780752228367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04942744980812571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220305937369585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994947561509935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654212610933799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369606575545907,0.0,0.0,0.05482867245610628,0.051569089990097766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20308996990909275,0.12297600591609753,0.0,0.062856553650338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773253649536062,0.0,0.059956951729887686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045891712623295416,0.12652243630586885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061081657527597616,0.05140085644851728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467098615420504,0.0,0.07692068074691236,0.0,0.05755642323793056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056940405109663625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306866167275042,0.0,0.3236334740857814,0.12151343552850526,0.0,0.11734906938908585,0.0,0.1962294398575909,0.0,0.0,0.05077914565512412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03830133254685823,0.0,0.057645526543018265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565029398667034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04218061257216814,0.042546250774563615,0.04425468946680952,0.0,0.12204772381924844,0.10769374640893037,0.05621983100955328,0.3854009562727494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038881906003116605,0.043639775966467766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03977979401544665,0.05010165870096612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21961813452407533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218540112755354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580712245955432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04746500300527636,0.06449708122479568,0.17226313451434275,0.05849128230521035,0.04861755393698519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122716087767018,0.0,0.0458234274502226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054079599569721706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050152304728830005,0.052827431986664314,0.0,0.0,0.03812046057295557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691701935474073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03895698595934709,0.06241253432988654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319552944948621,0.0946883684122356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987290191915142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406228092488797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531910960825654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mankdemer520,2020/03/30,"What’s wrong with me? For the past four years now, I’ve known there was something wrong with me, but I just can’t put a finger on it. Lately, it’s been getting a lot worse. Panic attacks almost every night, major depressive episodes, sometimes I even see things when I’m freaking out too bad. But the main problem is every single night when I try to go to bed, I see the most disturbing pictures in my head. I don’t know what’s wrong with me, and my parents say it’s “just my imagination, so I need to get over it”, but I’ve been contemplating suicide recently because I just can’t take the vivid mental torture that I see every single damn day. Does anyone have any suggestions on what I should do or is this the wrong sub?",4.999931972789113,5.187152122448982,5.550068027210886,84.36278911564625,68.59183673469389,8.165986394557821,28.578231292517003,7.793537801064563,1.6089945578231286,570,18,118,6,9,184,93,147,0.353,0.647,0.0,-0.9964,1,0,1,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,0,0,10,13,3,2,7,0,11,2,2,0,0,21,21,8,1,3,7,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,10,5,0,0,3,0,0,2,3,13,0,1,3,6,15,0,12,17,6,17,0,1,4,0,3,5,1,4,10,76,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873582193452504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874262627582679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989322516529492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14625732319896476,0.0,0.0,0.10734352446973323,0.07836992778951772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291156430313726,0.0,0.11072987487872768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125050790167662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849136914714139,0.0,0.3249559527918681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433620768483862,0.0,0.07306449172994009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194124060216447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065406586249152,0.0,0.1450230284702127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929843264908733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295598046895161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532676053999432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412926118913536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083927912783726,0.14275238735950022,0.0,0.1227265467911537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12301604100761993,0.0,0.12923986697644704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693902112698568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223730487066238,0.0,0.0,0.30734073197508066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897296235965844,0.12715066054373506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406254696295256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666228613314784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541058143917506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728485364277534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13101520306251693,0.0,0.5622474932323122,0.0,0.08278942332854705
mentalhealth,WildwoodFlower-,2020/03/30,"Finding it hard to look after myself during this pandemic. Like a switch has been flicked, everything is so difficult.",6.177999999999997,9.463752799999998,6.0100000000000025,69.785,71.0,10.0,35.0,10.125756701596842,4.8165,96,5,13,3,2,30,20,20,0.201,0.691,0.10800000000000001,-0.2827,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,1,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.488168611743289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4964500205778904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4865760621276613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653667515527988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4561282785702895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PuzzleheadedMarket2,2020/03/30,"Girlfriend Can someone please help me? I have my own problems (anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts), etc. and my girlfriend also suffers from a lot of the same things. The difference is that I'm trying to do things about it (medicine, therapy, etc) and she won't do anything no matter what I say! Please, what do I do for her!?",3.4198907103825142,5.965067737704921,3.850409836065573,85.5650136612022,76.54098360655738,7.3453551912568305,31.478142076502728,8.344100000000001,2.6555224043715846,256,13,47,5,6,80,47,61,0.21,0.6459999999999999,0.14400000000000002,-0.8251,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,7,10,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,1,8,0,5,8,5,0,0,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,39,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16923467369687906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16189085988745447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741475298756852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822704043086265,0.0,0.0,0.22110078045588644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4720307155375417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14184629950338404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17991413366146156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4645965622796581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20249443571992135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682909414880941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17930730851324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314809913181637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24200911061138505,0.0,0.2811855649291272,0.0,0.0,0.16800486171978826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436779873625985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,miscpx,2020/03/30,"Resources during this time? I know that online therapy can be touch and go for most, but I was wondering if anyone had any recommendations for free/affordable therapy that I could turn to as my college campus' therapy has currently shut down and hasn't gotten back to me about resuming yet. I'm in the United States

I've also been looking for anxiety/behavioral workbook resources if anyone has any of those.

Sorry for the vagueish post I was just trying hard to make it if I can edit it later with any needed info I will!",10.851999999999995,7.7110790000000025,10.798000000000002,62.17400000000002,59.0,14.0,41.0,12.161744961471696,4.993500000000001,420,16,71,10,4,141,72,100,0.033,0.924,0.043,0.4482,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,12,0,0,1,0,15,21,8,0,5,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,3,8,0,13,13,1,11,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,5,5,52,14,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15055331114447926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3840745049094646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632747861706699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14476210512682489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15031214533040455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699381628313806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16864606231285698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346404886370313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809293567392735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566656203156007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13959412653935407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803032642730089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21074425657736492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6458831184016365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097772741120912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278177589939878,0.20477534580077988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041624578263992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bricks-and-water,2020/03/30,"My awareness of my surroundings is scary I don't even know if this is the right place to post this but I just need to say it so I can try to start moving forward. 

I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety when I was 13, but have mostly gotten it under control in the past few years. I started university a little while ago and with studying and understanding the world a little bit better I feel that I have begun to have an intense awareness of everything going on around me. I don't know if I'm explaining this properly but the more aware I become and the more I understand what's really going on in the world, the more I fall back into the depression and anxiety that I dealt with so long ago. It doesn't get better. I love learning and being able to understand more and more but knowing insider secrets about everything from politics to the legal system I just lose more and more hope in the governing body and society in general. I was supposed to start therapy again this week but obviously couldn't because of the whole quarantine thing, which just gives me more time to think too deeply into everything and it's just a crazy cycle I can't get out of. What am I supposed to do?",6.115505824647458,6.4202963476394865,6.853503985285102,75.56910944206008,66.21030042918456,10.7773145309626,32.093500919681176,10.608840637214634,3.4066556713672598,951,36,178,24,14,315,123,233,0.11800000000000001,0.8190000000000001,0.063,-0.9294,0,1,0,1,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,4,13,7,0,0,15,0,17,3,1,1,1,46,39,21,0,5,11,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,14,17,0,1,11,0,0,5,5,3,0,0,4,2,22,4,29,33,12,40,0,3,0,1,5,19,0,4,16,137,36,3,0.12126207340071743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21498302306979675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855303084853165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794895437914462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324304938406423,0.0,0.07392023443120406,0.13392443299383885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214492899330128,0.1323867775519251,0.13469482697058188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360057264422942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20888569226596232,0.12307845195513592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009245583132207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269475976468039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06131374782903552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12670885688873104,0.11632563032582145,0.1378320615984117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204406000235204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999273927915372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430729084744816,0.0,0.1073131190647207,0.0,0.13566124249829276,0.0,0.0,0.1094437556315854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288823934052313,0.0,0.08991429092047905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575837015059275,0.0,0.0,0.1266930573870641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613554638478955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768358931334901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355714811950023,0.0,0.09643246787149236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25748975905648297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867374902820814,0.0,0.08056113334499883,0.07769984028725839,0.0,0.0,0.07070889016372088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232898798753628,0.0,0.0,0.3787142848405636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726912086654396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538477443360378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808879953681598
mentalhealth,HeadCollar,2020/03/30,Senior Project Survey [Mental Health & Creativity](https://forms.gle/s3xP1eujQMVBuyNB9),29.67,39.29929600000001,18.505,-23.359999999999985,26.5,13.2,45.5,11.20814326018867,8.9376,80,3,3,2,1,21,8,8,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5946986290901843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5834213909664308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5531302026838261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dimnaught,2020/03/30,"My dad ordered a gun because of the *you know what crisis*. I can't take the stress anymore and Im afraid of what I might do to myself when it arrives. I don't want to leave my family, and unborn first nephew, this way but I'm afraid my time is coming up. I had problems before this shit, I'm tipping now",-0.4631818181818197,1.6377807878787929,1.7517424242424262,97.19761363636366,89.6060606060606,3.9060606060606062,17.340909090909093,5.148860815047168,-0.6987818181818182,236,6,54,1,8,79,48,66,0.17600000000000002,0.7809999999999999,0.043,-0.8598,0,0,0,1,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,2,5,1,3,3,0,6,1,1,0,0,8,12,4,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,5,0,1,1,0,9,0,5,10,0,8,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,1,4,34,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717988171057955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16706746827638938,0.0,0.23320911248599144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23608271324805544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583640723682589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331195323272835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29603720862536664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15061894581276564,0.0,0.0,0.29019524239085964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29073963408116793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622431729645725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2813237639672845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31394050908629584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20606275745775227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15980949404699715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16165062622232207,0.2175400247715835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vintagemap,2020/03/30,An Evolving List of Mental Health Resources! [https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kGkcapWoXWjY-x9sVMCHWHURy-DxOiBBHn4WPZ\_uc68/edit?usp=sharing](https://docs.google.com/document/d/1kGkcapWoXWjY-x9sVMCHWHURy-DxOiBBHn4WPZ_uc68/edit?usp=sharing),117.16,147.31805500000004,61.19500000000001,-336.5499999999999,-126.0,6.6000000000000005,41.5,7.1686216300943375,5.441300000000001,232,3,4,1,2,51,8,8,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7256947839852953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6880167734122008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,septerpride,2020/03/30,"Should you tell your partner if you have a mental illness? I don't have a girlfriend, but I do entertain the ""what if"" scenario, and... With my ex, when I told her about some of my struggles, she said I was asking too much of her, even when I said that she shouldn't do anything about it, that all I needed was her support. And... That sort of traumatized me, it makes me feel like, because of my situation, I shouldn't pursue any type of relationship, not even friendships, because I'm a danger to people. And I started wondering what would happen if I ended up in a relationship, should I tell her that I have something wrong? It has the possibility of jeopardizing our relationship, and also stress her out, or is it worse for me to not say anything?",7.962039408866995,6.533552731034487,8.113399014778327,73.78793103448277,63.06896551724138,10.768472906403945,35.886699507389174,9.606745405546679,3.1864285714285714,586,22,114,9,7,192,82,145,0.18899999999999997,0.748,0.063,-0.965,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,1,3,0,0,8,7,1,2,6,0,15,1,0,1,1,25,27,12,0,9,7,1,1,1,2,5,1,3,0,1,10,6,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,5,4,28,3,15,17,3,7,0,0,0,0,24,3,0,7,5,94,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214606285458662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328551930679693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499732232922528,0.0,0.14198992498474802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18517270290181811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452308874446292,0.0,0.0,0.20063432756200494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679651246986756,0.10850511004622293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430946757271206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420226922936729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138295528355162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530621495927819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165134145150574,0.11261917935840016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529641685241416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17122504783366255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4891958932130453,0.0,0.0,0.2889506668717941,0.12078330690276542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072264244940558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692680771353972,0.0,0.0,0.10750343488696963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17398124607272153,0.1587808906488659,0.0,0.0,0.17235481326792484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655045414657305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513053406362195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16471042891422102,0.0,0.0,0.15478155943612948,0.10789319072657316,0.16606001013108698,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wingo_678,2020/03/30,"Does anyone else have inner voices that aren't theirs? Like, it kind of feels like you're talking to yourself, but you don't really feel like you can control what they say? Like you're making up a conversation in your head, but your brain is really good at coming up with the other side.",6.992631578947368,6.2645300175438585,6.93228070175439,79.20263157894739,64.6140350877193,9.705263157894738,26.017543859649123,8.841846274778883,1.6488175438596495,229,4,45,3,3,73,45,57,0.069,0.772,0.159,0.7528,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,4,2,1,0,6,0,0,2,0,5,2,2,2,0,8,9,2,0,0,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,6,6,7,9,0,7,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,4,26,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15900316284929886,0.2329978732739932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538532792623549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19588471273745411,0.0,0.0,0.25504810824508023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989990165263576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899632763932903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299602495023829,0.3249087930692586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19073208581542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333777047984242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368018022389516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44438404289058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15179107059999716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913561511612361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18083737462675128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18277527120820128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jl101794,2020/03/30,"Looking for help with anger/concentration issues 20 years after a severe head injury. I had a subdural hematoma that required a frontal craniotomy as a child.    I didn't really ever have any follow up after the physical injury healed, and I'm starting to feel more and more as though I have some lasting effects from it.    I have always had problems with concentration and short term memory.  Recently though, they seem to be getting worse. I have a hard time remembering why I walked into the kitchen, or retaining the words I read.     I have also developed some pretty severe anger issues.   I lose my temper at seemingly benign situations.    It is affecting my relationships and my overall mental health.   I feel like I need some sort of help, but don't know exactly where to turn.   Any input would be much appreciated.   Thank you.",5.708896396396398,7.981455790540544,6.361891891891887,71.41801801801802,68.79729729729729,9.527927927927928,29.90090090090089,9.928628108626363,3.368349549549549,659,26,105,17,12,215,101,148,0.127,0.758,0.115,0.3182,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,1,3,5,7,2,0,8,0,13,4,1,2,2,29,26,11,0,3,2,0,3,1,0,1,2,0,1,1,3,7,1,2,7,1,0,2,2,4,0,0,3,4,16,3,15,20,7,16,0,1,1,0,6,5,0,7,10,72,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176859058911267,0.12245110111684365,0.0,0.0,0.20015127618849368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311702840771278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488196998072124,0.1051330157145044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688640277575008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182881510466052,0.0,0.1510313197387526,0.15642699917059494,0.0,0.0,0.19728002411916698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071991133827027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087673545753964,0.11995718890737475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189622989755695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12357954938579252,0.16463734561100102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830532286985065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818146933693897,0.10911922902246232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497173055264901,0.0,0.14081476676756785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14720245911143015,0.0,0.09427615217548857,0.0,0.1453053480447533,0.15799759570994332,0.16670657760135274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679426713824721,0.0,0.33250377831891537,0.0,0.0,0.1654169674018949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416247036218193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548758221177246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891730830354625,0.0,0.08581171580970393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600706878615683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279138823465325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997129732951736,0.10454011346850567,0.0,0.0,0.09476791190271416
mentalhealth,shayncappa,2020/03/30,"Little or Barely any Hey, I'm no professional on mental health, but is there any way to have ""little"" to barely any symptoms of that mental illness? I've been noticing tourettes-like symptoms going on with me but I don't seem to have 90% of the other symptoms, just a tic when I get anxious. Again, I'm no mental health professional so don't flame me too hard haha. Have a good day everyone!",2.7398901098901116,4.761800461538464,4.18648351648352,84.89423076923079,76.43589743589743,5.995604395604397,23.96336996336997,6.868970318607317,0.9216754578754576,308,10,59,3,7,102,51,78,0.152,0.7509999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.3595,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,3,1,7,6,0,0,0,6,12,5,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,1,4,2,8,11,0,9,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,2,3,35,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265734894809613,0.0,0.0,0.18084141358650774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323640371721901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529604061230474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836336106244917,0.0,0.09097543182332757,0.13426496881199915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433975240551723,0.0,0.0,0.3403086701285355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208783581493346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.483959810004869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822486929248355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14572806269430255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4991437969947324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706164892964675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,butimhurt,2020/03/30,"why are some people with trauma good and others are bad? i’ve dealt with a lot of trauma in my life. abuse in different forms, grew up with a very unstable mother and an even more unstable abusive father. constant fighting at home, verbally and physically violent. a few other bad things happened when i was younger revolving around other close family members. i’m also a lesbian who can’t come out due to not living in a safe environment. i don’t think i was ever well or adjusted. i’ve never felt unwell before now. i mean i was depressed and such but i never associated it with trauma or nothing. i’ve always been toxic in my relationships. i get into them seeking companionship, validation and care because i can’t give it to myself. i can’t be there for myself because i never knew how and so i look for other people to “take care” of me. i noticed that a lot of the women i’ve been with have been extremely motherly and i grow an unhealthy attachment to them. but i’m also destructive. when i feel like they aren’t being there for me or caring/loving me i break them down and criticize them. it’s selfish and ugly. my recent ex told me how i made her feel like an object that i could throw away and destroy whenever i pleased. she also had a very traumatic upbringing and my behavior towards her reinforced a lot of the negative feelings she grew up with. despite all the trauma she went through, she was a good person. she is a good person. why am i bad? why can’t i love someone and care for them in a healthy way? i recently started therapy and they’ve diagnosed me with major depressive disorder, adjustment disorder with mixed emotional feelings and they think i might also be BPD. why can’t i be a good person while others with trauma can? what is so wrong with me?",3.359684856372596,5.515921170028824,5.166261968950455,77.96000371850889,75.05187319884726,8.281453936971277,27.62006135539649,9.023248300946321,2.5925267081900163,1414,57,252,33,31,482,177,347,0.239,0.631,0.131,-0.9919,2,0,0,0,3,0,31.0,0,0,7,0,18,28,4,0,18,0,28,4,0,3,5,61,53,30,0,1,6,4,5,2,0,1,2,0,1,4,13,29,0,1,11,0,0,6,12,16,1,0,13,6,49,12,37,34,9,36,0,2,1,2,29,15,0,8,15,195,62,0,0.0,0.20271950540467545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27364909526950165,0.07118234078594331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615537758655311,0.0,0.0,0.0803746558513574,0.0,0.21428567035644192,0.10429787665423566,0.0,0.07279458861634391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774403265556208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616640144106148,0.0,0.0,0.07369156293733932,0.0,0.0924464142691282,0.0,0.06830268671110422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473638059621282,0.08682887236212694,0.0,0.08937888910919121,0.1960896040484436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622937948098878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056503291307905976,0.0773825763435826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064653289403714,0.0,0.17302146719335,0.12223024675462693,0.0821389783892125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044695017637827614,0.0820649199559845,0.0,0.2870126067443665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564933741784921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581107870122855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06042470178736373,0.0835883367501782,0.0,0.07553997554525775,0.0,0.0718383217326804,0.0,0.0,0.2181881769283804,0.07720992373247182,0.08094707624228244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931862643487531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075233738422762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19793842774261464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820850962530052,0.09739635158548504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861567633787826,0.22409023021173802,0.0,0.0939054229815123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16893559483262147,0.09184595808945206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07248408626612672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605509333505426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432104431248405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783097742192118,0.0,0.05683393196325701,0.1096307177688463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174426523631184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411712294963904,0.0,0.06790359279716361,0.0,0.0,0.07691744145944797,0.07930335359942699,0.3087731107207617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935327193611061,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KC0256,2020/03/30,"How can I better myself and improve my mental health? I believe I’m suffering from some sort of mental illness. I believe i am a good Person but I lash out when I don’t get my way sometimes. I’m a people person and I hate to say no and I hate when people are upset at me.  I’m prone to being taken advantage because of this.
When I argue with people and I say what I feel I always apologize because I’m afraid they won’t talk to me again. I’m a obsessive thinking and I would really think about someone or something the entire day until I go to sleep. My ill rational thinking sometimes make me send text that I shouldn’t send and it puts me bad situations. Most recently I had a falling out with a girl who I really liked. She wasn’t interested in me that I thought she led me on and gave me mixed signals. I was upset because it appeared she didn’t want to be friends or whatever but didn’t mind stringing me along knowing how I feel. Therefore I said I’m done and don’t want to talk to you anymore. A week later I apologized and she didn’t respond and I feel really bad about. This is all think about and I hated the way i handled that situation. Again I hate hurting people or making people angry so I’m trying to make it right but she isn’t receptive. My mental health is in shambles right now.",2.389898550724638,4.087563551851853,4.371964573268922,84.62644927536233,76.44444444444444,6.917874396135267,25.81320450885668,7.7425588080867325,1.493301127214171,1029,38,206,15,23,352,133,270,0.223,0.68,0.09699999999999999,-0.9917,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,2,12,19,5,4,8,0,20,5,1,7,1,48,51,24,0,4,6,0,3,1,1,3,4,3,0,3,10,16,0,0,9,0,0,7,10,13,0,0,11,6,46,6,24,35,3,28,0,2,0,0,24,8,0,7,12,138,56,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797060595613456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949992586488063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15996351731801312,0.17518051549590286,0.0,0.0,0.21584805021034265,0.0,0.08471964626012476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06177748270231271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980277877905126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14530492272278472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400814330398654,0.0,0.05004701585536472,0.0,0.054440419885176984,0.08034522212755431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3782964233014045,0.0,0.2036434070281945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254659909083952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0526444093577785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04679880483053172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19182436817901255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28960538835782423,0.0,0.0967219354336552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3320482320020592,0.16728258759275114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09629674356879242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18409913505008915,0.0,0.09458238121342663,0.0,0.0,0.16361054344998707,0.09111949004406736,0.15235421949310465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21534693499589908,0.09586050853256396,0.0,0.08116368235980381,0.07374484514386481,0.18948014787440212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15398688376803432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455168634174028,0.0,0.07604761537380827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503602460539289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130004156365288,0.15206939676782524,0.07683802622448338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804741186214104,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,akumagirll,2020/03/30,"what is this? everything feels so strange. I'm positive nobody will see this but i still want to talk about this

for the last 2 weeks Iv'e been doing the same thing everyday. it almost feels like im flipping pages of a book very fast.. I'm just gliding through my days. I usually think its around 3-5 days before the actual date. it almost feels like im not conscious ( not to be dramatic ). today it was like all the days I ""missed "" hit me all at once, and my depression started to get alot worse. It's like I woke up from a coma or some shit. after all of this I just started contemplating everything around me, everything feels like a simulation. 

today I went on a walk that I totally could have gotten hit by a car because i was completely "" spaced out"" and I was just swaying like a drunk person on the side of the road. Everything just felt surreal. like a simulation, and like I wasn't even there. and when I'm not completely gone in my mind, I'm just depressed and questioning everything.

I dunno what to call this but it's a big struggle right now :(",2.1408571428571435,4.423880514285717,3.5938095238095267,87.10785714285716,79.57142857142857,7.6190476190476195,23.809523809523807,8.563005593585519,1.6916666666666669,828,29,170,19,21,272,120,210,0.155,0.726,0.11900000000000001,-0.8999,0,0,0,0,1,0,28.0,0,0,0,0,14,13,1,1,15,0,11,3,1,0,4,40,33,10,0,2,11,0,5,8,0,1,1,0,0,1,15,8,1,0,8,2,0,4,4,5,0,0,10,6,16,8,21,18,8,34,0,3,1,0,4,13,1,7,25,106,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.1010122230467719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20730348799135268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18429423509847825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309960638873442,0.0,0.08808060214204963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569674232861302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170595279369677,0.0,0.0,0.0826454532924317,0.0,0.0,0.2002689253454421,0.0,0.17830848432288762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683683226460406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4651469898600808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20935395478654426,0.22184575678132806,0.09938720464491038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054080449400403616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22362021204244464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437563015974572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.404563645345202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451703554605024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11023629368752448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038218722194416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595649023611453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839819482934362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248520728060442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625299441759467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653184449981088,0.0,0.08266436094814024,0.0,0.0,0.1082126203807521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08319856572477674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876839397784594,0.06632594412503505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19623346292578428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140032151107845,0.08540776955763818,0.061053722740601724,0.0,0.08303062466839614,0.0,0.0,0.09595613176324906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548698942773142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rase0,2020/03/30,"The lockdown has given me time to self-evaluate as the rug has been pulled from under my feet it was very tough Hello lads, 

  
I'm making this post for some guidance, and also I could help others by what I have discovered during the last few days. Maybe someone needs to hear what I am saying, maybe someone can relate and it could help depersonalise their situation, or perhaps someone can add to what I've been mulling over.

  
I work in a school as a trainee teacher, as you may know in many countries the schools were one of the first places to close. Over the past week, I've discovered that this has had quite an impact on me, I thoroughly enjoy the company of other teachers and staff, and I enjoy interacting and helping the students, I even enjoy challenging behaviour and ways I can prevent it or help students who are presenting themselves with this behaviour. I completely undervalued this, to be honest, and now that I'm at home working online, I was missing the essential parts of the job, which is the personal touch of everything. It's merely the schoolwork itself which isn't that stimulating. It feels very lonely.   
So what do I fall back on for social contact, to escape these feelings, my friends, of course! I had a hard time in secondary school making friends and was bullied; we had a small school year which 90% of the students decided that they would exclude me, no talking to me, no interaction with me if could be avoided and so on... I did have one excellent friend who didn't fall into the groupthink of it all, and he is still a very close friend to me, he is the exception in this story. 

​

I started forming, friendships outside my school and thinking there was something wrong with me but also suffering from crippling depression and anxiety. I found it hard to get out in the world and know more people. So I settled for what friends I could find, and this continued up until college.   
The friends I found in this period were lovely lads but very odd and not very sociable themselves, and very inconsistent. I often found times, where I was fulled, dressed, a bit of aftershave on, ready to go out for a few beers and they would like him and hah last minute if we were really going to go out, often not ending up going out at all. Which was heartbreaking, but in my head at the time I thought, shit, they're the only friends you have you best hang on to them. So I did, but this naturally strained. 

  
After I got into the second year of college, I made new friends through a political society I joined where I could talk about politics and history, and we went out regularly. I thought this was brilliant and had a great time, but when I got into the third year, this really started to wind down. All of a sudden, we weren't the same group we were anymore. A lot of them got heavy into drugs, including one friend I made outside college through the social group I was in that I mentioned before. This started small but steadily snowballed over time. 

  
I've always struggled with anxiety through my life, and me being me I never sought help, fast-forwarding to last August I started talk therapy, I found it brilliant I came out of my shell, I got a girlfriend, which only lasted a few weeks, to be honest, but it was brilliant. I had the tools in my self to really deal with the breakup. Of course, it wasn't that long, so it wasn't that hard to deal with when we went our separate ways. However, after this time, in November and the first half of December, I started to drink a lot more than I had been before. When I went out, it was mostly just one of my mates who live nearby who has a dangerous drink and drug problems. So it was inevitable that I would overindulge frequently. I notice my relationship with alcohol was fucked, it was my confidence. I felt defeated somehow; I had reduced a lot of my anxiety, but it was still there and very strong in some situations. I started using CBD oil for two weeks and felt weird but ""confident"", I ended up doing a test week to stop using it and got the worst headaches in my life, lots of thunderclap headaches, I missed a day of teaching practice from it and pulled myself through the next week. 

  
So I decided that I would try help again, I went to a hypnotherapist this time in January which turned out to be very versed in psychoanalysis and eastern philosophy. A lot of the help that came was outside the hypnotherapy. I also had delved in lots of Alan Watts on youtube before and he really helped me. However I came ou,t of this feeling like superman, and although I don't feel like superman because I've become more accustomed to it, I'm still feeling the change that is made.   
So, here I am, confident in myself, knowing allot more of my self, practising mediation (inconsistently but I'm working on it), lost lots of weight over the last three months with a low carb diet, doing well in college and enjoying my work. But like a little piece of glass stuck in my foot that is too small to recognise fully, theres a low pain niggling away.   
Today I took that small piece of glass out of my foot, and it was the majority of friendships. I was preoccupied and excited; I was quite happy and delighted; I did not see what was and will bring me down. My friends were so unreliable, on Fridays and Saturdays I would sit on my phone trying to see if they would follow through with the plan, would they bail? They often bailed. Now, this isn't just one group of friends, this many groups of friends that I have accumulated.   
How come when I ask for help with something their never there? But I've been their shoulder to cry on so many times before? A lot don't talk to me during the week, were weekend friends on an inconsistent basis. I'm excited to go out and enjoy the world, and a lot of the time it wasn't happening anymore. I felt like I was back at square one this week when I had to confront it. 

  
*Surely there's no excuse this time 80 per cent of us are off work at home; we should do a conference call have a chat have a drink across the internet I thought.* 

  
But no, I noticed my plans don't work, it has to only suit them. 

  
*No, I'm going to play XBOX with my other mates*

  
Okay at this point you maybe think what the hell is wrong with this guy to let the lad play XBOX. Firstly I'd point out that we planned it for Friday and also he wasn't the only one to fob it off, a domino effect happened for no good reason. This had been happening with night-out plans for a long time. I had to confront this assertively; I appealed to one of my mates in this particular group of 4 or so years of knowing each other that what's happening here is hurting me because it's so inconsistent. He fobbed it off completely and did so the next night also after I replied to his plea (after he sent me three messages) to join them in a conference call that they ad-hoc organised for last night. Sure I thought, but asked him to consider what I said, I was loaded up and ready to join when he replied saying to get a life basically, I thought okay, and turned the computer off.   
I thought unified communication would help him understand and me maybe to understand his point of view, but he would engage with that at all. None of the lads even messaged to see what was up with me not joining and didn't do so today either. I've only recently decided to be assertive with my emotions and to give people the chance to strengthen our relationships. I very much value and appreciate when I'm heard and also when I have the opportunity to listen to others too. I had listened to their stories of substance abuse, depression, struggling with their sexuality, helping them with things, covering up their drug use, dealing with their drunken antics, covering for them when they cheated on their partners... The list goes on. 

  
They even put up an Instagram story targeted at me through that close friends feature to show they were all having a ball. I decided to go to sleep, and I didn't want to wake up, I got up so late today I didn't want to face the world. 

  
*I was thinking: ""Jesus fucking christ, what am I doing, I'm falling out with all my friends!""*

  
But no I was right in the first place, another one of my friends who I told that I was feeling down ignored the message, haven't heard from him in a day or two. He's posting cats and quarantine DJs on the internet. This is the same guy who says if I weren't there for him, he'd be dead.

  
**No, this is good in the long run,** I settled for friends and dealt with all this stuff for all my life. I don't need this in my life; I have the tools to go out there and make more friends. I have what I need to do that, and I'm a more mature and better judge of character than I ever was before. Today I've decided that if I've already been assertive with how I feel with some of these friends then its time to let go, its time to say goodbye and move on. The others I may give a chance to, it depends.   
I was clinging to these friendships trying to justify their actions, and I was trying to dress them up as something else In my head. I was trying to get more out of people who just couldn't give more, and that's fine, they can do them and more power to them. But I'd instead go mostly alone during this period. I've my family and I've one close friend, that's enough for these odd times we live in. I can go forth afterwards and etch out a new social calendar by joining new things and chatting with more people, and over time I may get another one or two close friends from that. I want to be able to share feelings, not just go out on Saturday for wreckless bullshit filled nights out.   
If there's anything you guys could add that may help I would greatly appreciate it, maybe I have approached something in a way you think that is causing an issue. I also understand that this is a long read and has probably functioned more as a way of venting than I initially intended, just writing it has helped me sort some of it out. But again, maybe I'm expecting too much of people, perhaps I'm a little arrogant, let me know?  
 If anyone is in Dublin and needs a friend, likes History or politics or arts, when this all ends give me a message! I'm now freer than ever.   
I'm no longer feeling extremely down as of yet.  
Get help, be proactive, don't be so hard on yourself, one love.",6.256531468229093,6.155286347091002,6.403856355263442,80.29628114933088,65.93684733963202,9.660123235249607,32.75299331935226,9.295737431971439,2.7034834765312525,8088,307,1608,134,115,2586,610,2011,0.08900000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.155,0.9993,4,6,12,0,1,1,241.0,12,6,28,26,78,93,8,4,102,3,161,30,10,17,15,306,296,140,1,34,44,0,18,6,27,16,10,10,3,7,130,131,7,4,42,15,1,36,36,32,1,24,106,34,209,61,280,153,56,281,3,12,5,4,171,126,4,40,118,1150,339,26,0.024464228334098368,0.028986110155685182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026144820042227283,0.0,0.0253375625288933,0.026996884308252526,0.13694824192067356,0.02035619776244075,0.02650698117894895,0.02972671516915911,0.0,0.051305752967330885,0.056145203142143024,0.0,0.048523881546345855,0.01710595727284276,0.0,0.020131975431617037,0.0,0.04574150212861915,0.0,0.02298494783303669,0.03762296300445515,0.0,0.029826333047416907,0.027018818138207317,0.10408628218379948,0.0,0.025673698313691283,0.02163662189708189,0.026708601161248357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04996142478763647,0.08394167960824961,0.0,0.02513150148096252,0.02587990973656086,0.02107376649900864,0.05130055591376046,0.0,0.0,0.1171961739144018,0.0,0.026872806073344045,0.04733221020113906,0.07566463557538226,0.04214200803274798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189689041525221,0.085112213967303,0.0,0.020436723591924284,0.0275189640807484,0.06500413480901092,0.025278087569574715,0.0,0.04847517626111841,0.044258590263393,0.0,0.0,0.02198687096413833,0.0,0.02306269721282316,0.0,0.11132864022181407,0.03495449922012766,0.07046848711215076,0.0,0.02235986149050057,0.08323704049370896,0.0,0.10729505456007778,0.4158220467452072,0.04523356976710095,0.06390774790389181,0.09387326809082837,0.16684301688757566,0.04103886805838016,0.1173976694914102,0.05394379620931286,0.0,0.07267029693377093,0.08653454528595354,0.02604262597212512,0.08766057329278107,0.0,0.05021471240166038,0.0,0.02757296333848662,0.0,0.2295699919596322,0.0,0.04907923142070994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026189462412857682,0.0,0.0,0.025534298374735368,0.024276971729234192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06722450048788575,0.1196496677360998,0.02759671514764456,0.0,0.0,0.075048992921389,0.08639903982779533,0.07171191736881455,0.0490391675483089,0.04320472364889867,0.08660028892522896,0.0,0.0,0.02670559514923141,0.1871875087250967,0.0441598424375371,0.06944593311005574,0.04899018714257093,0.07440866315491515,0.14746563346429348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019527113653924632,0.02600160307412341,0.035968045431503795,0.07255966129848919,0.03773664212618805,0.07088311251398419,0.05203596874786584,0.0918320841570972,0.0,0.0,0.055705372212369264,0.0,0.0,0.19893113110068894,0.09303074024215616,0.026031663803827185,0.0,0.0,0.02649237526418101,0.023353874130033002,0.08480207796623654,0.02136122055205869,0.05111982332711503,0.0,0.06937980993940927,0.0,0.046859936413489615,0.0,0.026376575886160103,0.02340896254952736,0.0,0.02459330654097499,0.0,0.05204143638940432,0.024470848701724668,0.0,0.06268964445276756,0.02515330123892846,0.024155474093425,0.052530851497902285,0.0,0.020892317327047376,0.023271083397645668,0.07781974517400382,0.0,0.12379552578461975,0.05848446776386945,0.0,0.07656457680723536,0.0,0.02511217882454426,0.0,0.05499763531702544,0.02448189610722324,0.07481459980107802,0.062185383834179764,0.075335032742584,0.0,0.0,0.1038954403894022,0.0,0.05861149304802898,0.020453190322936868,0.0,0.05115064641649253,0.02800568842719429,0.0,0.0,0.046114491365275616,0.0,0.0,0.07865368018579705,0.0,0.0,0.027976977178682038,0.0,0.03250589249769726,0.0627027587769819,0.0,0.11653118769870875,0.2282446124436089,0.0,0.092756911734355,0.023376618564704073,0.02718065783488193,0.08304802582364608,0.05322011069497516,0.0716939888730146,0.07640437341944299,0.029427454484934036,0.06338771543391117,0.0,0.18166995429199376,0.043288907153253384,0.07767426294203973,0.13736609817076126,0.029790839409446088,0.02199627930806508,0.0907143390492991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686149756866097,0.0,0.0,0.17378685895542156,0.05349558644886632,0.02972671516915911,0.06301664382370684
mentalhealth,TAPraise192837465,2020/03/30,"I have no brain left lol Throw away

I work in a care setting, 12 hour nights.

We're always short anyway. We're always underpaid anyway.

But this virus business? It's out of control. We're missing so many staff from all different roles. I'm contracted 3 nights but I'm currently working 5 a week, on my third week currently.

It's a nightmare lol. We have way too much to do with such little resources to do it. 

I can't go and buy food without queueing up behind a bunch of people at the only shop near where I live due to the time I finish. If I endure the queue, I lose sleep going into the next night shift. If I don't queue and sleep, I can't eat.

Really struggling at the moment. Just don't have any brain power left.",0.6913647058823571,2.9542106933333367,2.4831764705882367,92.9751176470588,85.4,5.129411764705883,18.823529411764707,6.522977012572876,0.05529411764705916,564,15,120,6,17,186,98,150,0.05,0.868,0.08199999999999999,0.6455,4,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,0,5,7,4,0,1,9,2,9,6,4,1,1,14,15,7,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,2,1,0,1,3,3,6,3,0,1,0,0,11,1,18,15,3,32,0,2,0,0,2,14,0,2,13,69,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382150799615363,0.0,0.0,0.0973430451559392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448879918186815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31959280005847285,0.0,0.0,0.14594517270166876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16054852492061028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495553460376213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647237376569755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17309067803338102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627044298445822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14096831942016758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110534416039072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14346821242228516,0.1263990556935968,0.0,0.0,0.16014187741748673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512587149243267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522754443777953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522356065804721,0.4029937379356857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886770449123873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923824684443093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170191580196736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2864953910770489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496455215800582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346860320896457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11362129714513552,0.22964347581458736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798601484351444,0.0,0.2084215373060896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YoStoffe,2020/03/30,"Need help Trying to recover from 5 and a half years of depression and suicidal thoughts I'd prefer if u dm instead of comment, cuz comments notifications are so messy. :) 
I've had depression & suicidal thoughts for 5 and a half years and recently I've been feeling much better but since it's been so long since I was ""myself"" so to speak idk how to hop back to the life/person I was before and idk how to tell my friends cuz like I legit like disappeared for years and was very distant and it would be weird just to jump back like nothing happened.",4.308922018348625,5.654943688073393,4.98797018348624,83.56892775229359,70.83486238532109,8.385779816513761,30.13876146788991,8.841846274778883,2.355118348623854,438,18,87,8,8,141,69,109,0.17,0.657,0.17300000000000001,0.3351,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,9,8,0,0,3,0,9,0,0,4,0,20,14,16,2,4,3,0,1,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,0,4,0,0,2,0,3,0,2,8,2,5,5,11,4,1,9,0,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,10,53,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187307805367735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658573069570274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14710217623889615,0.0,0.0,0.15289210550813032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297790494704553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740977469606198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13356123820148344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287100836363082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587311681604626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210530068868115,0.2533710227200912,0.0,0.0,0.15298715037831773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12708153387327945,0.12818312677982116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658762900527644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15094602114705702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17069121562774728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28600463669844184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3781899709983462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109860724083454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27448367755630154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736940809769672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263831608890454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228040074912176,0.0,0.0,0.3339736004801846
mentalhealth,joy-division-slut,2020/03/31,"Is this Depersonalization? Last night while having some anxiety I was using my phone to calm down, just take a break and distract my mind before I start panicking worse. 

I saw my name upon my phone screen and it was like I had never seen my name before? I was filled with thoughts of ' I hate that name' and it was a weird name to me? Almost as if I was meeting someone and they told me their name and it was one I didn't like. In my head I was thinking  'who is that person?' 'Am I that person?' it felt unfamiliar and then it was like I realized I am joy-division-slut (username) 

Is that depersonalization? I have been diagnosed with Dysthymia but never any anxiety. And I have only been dealing with anxiety since around the summer. I had a random bout of it that seemingly came out of no where and lasted for a month (it was extream affected my ability to sleep, and go to school) after that I felt hazy, and like I kinda have tunnel vision for months. But I couldn't figure out what was wrong and I thought the anxiety was situational? Maybe because I was just stressed ?. I have a psychiatrist appointment tomorrow at 9am thank God. But has anyone else ever experienced that?",2.6350743707093827,5.069172907894738,4.1646834477498125,82.86010297482841,78.69298245614036,7.298550724637683,23.509534706331053,8.321376580360154,1.5911889397406558,925,31,179,19,23,307,125,228,0.131,0.7759999999999999,0.09300000000000001,-0.7654,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,0,5,11,1,2,7,0,29,3,2,2,3,48,45,18,0,2,6,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,17,18,0,0,8,0,0,3,5,5,0,1,25,6,32,6,21,19,1,26,0,0,3,0,15,8,0,6,18,132,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12783833200026173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868167650315535,0.0,0.39065434467135945,0.0,0.0,0.08926652885395006,0.13080816132717346,0.0,0.11364916162547305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782356687549175,0.0,0.21726749257374767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14601506452365073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316172930689389,0.0,0.1295775670946624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664795586125864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154805504820999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24515736974968794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255511799934755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604302873331572,0.1310214038886903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20812847725056727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24948321955409375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825692841624833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890553477205818,0.0,0.2038024094903804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19692666124897534,0.0,0.0,0.11980521258436384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650929454530254,0.09709519468185453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22294478822219685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920407432546094,0.0,0.11622167185899822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560603498316136,0.14350111840044355,0.12775747363314133,0.0,0.10817037347062307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036213894557793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14624014151806053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598839888464368,0.0,0.0,0.1175370331238382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180275351315583,0.0,0.20270393647415635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198964152253805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026180798721756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13010182227838776,0.0,0.13958193730782978,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adriancan8,2020/03/31,"What happened to me? I'm confused . Hi, I'm an 18 year old guy with adhd. As far as I know, I don't have any other mental health problems.

I was hanging with my gf today and she brought up a sensitive topic that has to do with something that happened 6 months ago.

Needless to say, I started to get emotional. I started crying and hugging her for comfort. 

This sounds pretty normal so far (atleast for crying it does) but what happened next is what shocks me.

When I started to talk about how I felt on the situation, my thoughts went everywhere. I found it hard to talk, to breath, and to move. 

Then out of no where, my breathing went out of control. I was breathing fast, I couldnt calm down for what felt like forever.

 There was this static feeling that started in the back of my head and went down to the rest of my body. 
I asked my girlfriend to check my heartrate, it was 43 bpm (it's normally around 60-70). 

My vision was blurry, I wasnt even crying as much anymore, so I'm sure it wasnt my tears.

Then when it was all over, I felt really cold, and couldnt eat my dinner, despite being hungry before it all happened. 

Has anyone reading this experienced this before? What happened to me? Was it a panic attack?",2.9616666666666664,4.630116144032924,4.00775925925926,87.96941666666667,74.80246913580247,6.1768724279835405,26.55329218106996,6.742157984588678,1.1048339094650208,945,35,190,8,20,306,136,243,0.133,0.787,0.08,-0.9353,0,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,1,11,10,1,2,6,0,18,9,5,2,3,30,43,16,0,5,1,0,5,1,2,0,1,2,0,1,21,11,2,1,7,1,1,6,6,5,0,0,18,9,28,5,34,22,4,34,0,0,0,1,10,12,0,1,17,129,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057287588822793,0.0,0.08893332935855018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822541466845855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949686285662218,0.0701505745446881,0.0,0.0,0.08931179566299742,0.0937916716287475,0.11413580094505953,0.0,0.07714483406977038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707408099050075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144004990550913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252462535531932,0.0,0.0,0.3306116265119932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779633746268856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265898731264883,0.0,0.11285373337181955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662646626870585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05072805891390205,0.0,0.28898732642460306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11000275522642916,0.0,0.0,0.05241642033600216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993389418069464,0.4435916661187351,0.0,0.08987277770137014,0.0,0.10296386426631553,0.10664230662916943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055136783723781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049014427399805285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110544726985723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007960151969849,0.10663112070486064,0.07375147184177783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669829949965692,0.0,0.1965972057213038,0.0,0.0,0.10527571453885193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771145239551985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020680501978863,0.0,0.0959988468433447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10035358259355916,0.0,0.06427168187987976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978360619935015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277111402042572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723618950319201,0.0,0.0,0.2840462621545624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455647563337267,0.0,0.0,0.16127717283169815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964798110049283,0.0,0.0,0.09509772746665117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790108250994897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460693341507973
mentalhealth,aazam5895,2020/03/31,"Why do I feel high? Does anyone else ever feel like they’re high when they’re completely sober? The past couple days I’ve been feeling so out of it and it makes me feel like I’m high. I have to keep trying to bring myself back and realize where I’m at. I feel like I’m in my head, and sometimes things around me are fake or aren’t happening. I tried looking it up and i saw Depersonalization/derealization disorder. I’m not sure if that’s it. It said it’s a coping mechanism for anxiety, which I never thought I had, but could be because of the times.",1.654316205533597,3.6614130086956536,3.5707509881422936,88.08276679841896,79.78260869565217,6.964426877470356,21.758893280632414,8.00094639256281,0.9555217391304353,436,13,96,8,11,147,78,115,0.07,0.866,0.064,-0.1508,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,3,0,8,1,1,1,3,23,25,9,0,2,4,0,5,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,9,6,0,1,7,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,8,11,4,10,18,0,17,0,0,2,0,1,9,0,2,10,55,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260361717302812,0.0,0.0,0.10292202483903104,0.15081846468221424,0.0,0.1310345768556721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318371346016375,0.0,0.08972858232368604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543309446468266,0.0,0.0,0.11752306842839945,0.1628682437083842,0.0,0.09492846724499224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869799025736176,0.0,0.12881115919235211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229623656605153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314612137086282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721305615427637,0.31546797816583144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016387328253667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510643279021125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4665581552398577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13083349918183926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215735828839151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360655791595118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825367029612464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352570207863315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051408962156334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14001595966138047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14557941845692998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387293546345749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977896829069679,0.0,0.0,0.1168562273710462,0.08583047011270899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19987121072080932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328204100285647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheLadyEve,2020/03/31,"For those with insurance, please look into tele therapy options! I'm not sure if this post will be well-received, but I'm a psychologist in the U.S. and I just wanted to make a post letting people know that many states are covering teletherapy the same as they do office visits! The co-pay is generally the same. Check with your insurance company to see what their policy is! The company might argue that they require a specific contracted platform, but also look into what your state guidelines are regarding emergency measures. Don't be afraid to try it, as it's surprisingly effective. I prefer therapy in person but I've made good connections via tele therapy and I consider it a great option during this pandemic.",6.1925384615384615,8.292121638461545,7.0892307692307694,67.39076923076927,67.23076923076923,11.661538461538465,33.769230769230774,11.407655852321104,4.854292307692308,583,27,90,21,10,194,89,130,0.059000000000000004,0.8,0.141,0.9185,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,3,2,2,6,1,1,9,0,11,0,0,3,1,26,20,9,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,10,6,0,1,3,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,1,3,8,4,12,14,2,10,0,0,3,0,8,5,0,4,0,61,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430576187747023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15004376330472455,0.0,0.19722596097617395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831281920479752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829263145389543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004437265535833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16926927476358894,0.11940992188864015,0.1813655585619441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1897731585282963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401923850350002,0.15619913862407936,0.0,0.19636660868235029,0.0,0.0,0.3426527845601404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425515217375806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686009423429084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6137261294548781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214540158552282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551347776589268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16084286347220456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nixup,2020/03/31,"Really struggling Long story short: I'm studying a final research year for my undergrad. There's a lot of pressure to do well in order to get into a PhD on time next year. I need to get Honours First Class in order to get a scholarship.

I really don't think I'll manage that.

I have pre-existing Bipolar II. I've just been diagnosed with inattentive ADHD. My mother is dying of cancer, has dementia, and doesn't understand why she can't just go out like normal right now despite being on chemo so we've all but had to barricade her in her house and we can't visit her and she hates us for it. My sister keeps bringing up the fact that we are going to have to hold her funeral this year with less than ten people because of the restrictions, and that my brother and his family in Queensland won't be able to make it down because of the state borders closing. Here in Sydney Australia we are now deep into social isolation, so I can't even go out to try and get away from my thoughts. I can't sleep - last night I probably got \~3 hours. My honours project has been cancelled TWICE because of covid-19, and I'm the only person in my entire cohort that has had their project cancelled at all. I was meant to be doing lab work all year but now I'm literally just at home writing a literature review instead, which is the worst possible option for me, because I have mild reading comprehension issues. I only found out yesterday that I was on the wrong track and now I have to get a draft presentation and project proposal done by 5pm *today* without having read any fucking papers for this topic, when I'm expected to have done \~30-60. Which are hard enough for me to do, because I did Health Science (Speech and hearing) for my bachelor's degree and my honours year is in Neuroscience, so I don't have a lot of the understanding that's assumed and each paper I read takes hours because I have to look into the background information. I just can't seem to get the readings done at all because I can't focus enough to read for more than 5 minutes at a time. I have a psychologist but I can only get in to see her once a month and very soon I won't have access to her because I had to quit my job to study and she's paid for by my old job. I have been desperately seeking a psychiatrist to help me get medication for ADHD and anxiety but I can't find one that charges less than $500 for the first consultation and has an appointment available soon. I applied for Austudy two months ago but they haven't approved it even though it's now well past the date I was told it would be done by, so now I'm down to my last $300, I don't know when I will get any money, no jobs are available near me, and three of my immediate family members have been laid off because of covid so I feel a responsibility to help them in any way I can. I'm not suicidal so, realistically, the chance of me getting help from the community mental health team is very very low. 

I want to tell my honours supervisors that I'm not coping but I desperately don't want to give them the impression that I am not a good candidate for a PhD. I already choked during my first presentation because I hadn't slept because my mum needed care so I know I haven't given them the best impression so far. One of them has seen me perform better in other assessments so I hope she knows that it was a one-off, but that bad impression is the only one the chief supervisor has seen. Any time I try to tell family members that I'm not coping they just say I need to keep going, which I *know*, I'm used to having to be stubborn and keep going, but I'm in so much pain right now and don't know how to stop it. I'm meant to submit my drafts today and all I can do is sit here and cry and write this and I don't know what to do.

I KNOW I am good enough to do really well. I know that if all this weren't counting against me, I would be firmly on track to get a scholarship, even though I have ADHD and bipolar. I know that I am really good at presentations and assignments and that I've been learning at a phenomenal rate considering my existing lack of experience. So all of this has an extra level of frustration built over the top of it because I know that what everyone else is seeing isn't anywhere near my actual potential.",5.773220084819232,5.399286260619982,6.786765856744534,78.0649581761522,66.99081515499428,10.003430258440922,31.437967150120677,9.606745405546679,2.670704800955974,3387,119,692,63,49,1140,344,871,0.109,0.8059999999999999,0.086,-0.9639,3,1,0,0,0,0,68.0,4,0,7,15,40,29,4,2,37,0,91,11,2,3,8,115,165,51,3,12,19,4,2,1,0,5,8,3,1,1,35,39,0,7,23,6,4,7,27,11,3,10,30,10,98,18,107,124,21,99,0,1,5,1,43,44,1,7,44,479,133,27,0.0500169475240794,0.0,0.04880932575208074,0.0,0.18033195347391606,0.0,0.044337006130172094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05519494534301134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605295788234925,0.0,0.038262827953515086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04699256865610302,0.0,0.041762061973312496,0.36587840364187335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052489700626082256,0.04423592550092083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05099561145560904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494126824028221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05076614888846639,0.05190969487237742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047388113216045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04178274162184256,0.0,0.0,0.15504263149566852,0.0,0.09910716635576304,0.0,0.0,0.04779333678845487,0.0,0.04892617217830775,0.14145458019410134,0.0,0.025290071509294867,0.0,0.0,0.05479112120354861,0.04571458390360336,0.12763317003843735,0.0,0.05484100132073949,0.0,0.046239862023656486,0.2874496977874731,0.04798081365873831,0.14212891959471166,0.12585552763558694,0.040003122070118136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044805360651868464,0.04938138063939874,0.0,0.1063313526403721,0.05637273498065875,0.0,0.10057591684015783,0.0,0.050171076499279835,0.04967811453493928,0.09851323632876632,0.05771284203886672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05220469840420961,0.14890230802811266,0.13337208329796452,0.0,0.0,0.2748800630305228,0.08154097581036711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02443575410665892,0.0,0.0,0.04426342461726095,0.0420016388300988,0.0,0.0,0.08504524032400533,0.0,0.0,0.03338670086028565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050386812580751485,0.0504053189926649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984610064841258,0.0,0.036768211453940616,0.11126079847999208,0.0,0.0,0.05319359112175656,0.046937517010401685,0.04900598897010782,0.0,0.0,0.05248437267032975,0.05326641673656714,0.1355711123643694,0.15216056976815084,0.05322155862262504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477468359473136,0.034675453692183375,0.04367286933442459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05638659314893792,0.0,0.0,0.053926729016183776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05319918039962333,0.2501524141020813,0.0,0.12816854936425404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542839979521108,0.0,0.03977548420442372,0.0,0.0,0.07971406292133049,0.04553355052074772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050053069165407534,0.050985979218071964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04181640774078578,0.0,0.052288573395763635,0.0,0.05471042251226183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03760651985218552,0.0,0.08743403344449359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032048840377606136,0.09828279398498936,0.03970786938686528,0.08749585298078362,0.0,0.09482043584931824,0.04779333678845487,0.0,0.06791644834037287,0.0,0.04885928998429974,0.10413881262992193,0.06016422944715074,0.04319858357042077,0.0,0.12380765971759175,0.05900258308825492,0.039701124847340584,0.0,0.0,0.1349137278541958,0.0,0.04513251550195858,0.0,0.0,0.048214552554277854,0.0,0.03641293349649975,0.0,0.0,0.07106120892955001,0.054685680325616784,0.0,0.1610463716773365
mentalhealth,lazydaisy6702,2020/03/31,"i don’t care if i die right now i just need to get some things off of my chest 

i am sick of being inside, not being able to see anyone. i barely have anyone to speak to, the only people that actively message me are my boyfriend and best friend. i haven’t heard off my mother or any other family members and am living in fear of passing anything on to my grandmother whom i live with. my mental health is pretty bad again and i’m struggling with immense guilt after eating anything but i don’t know how to talk to anyone about it. i truly do not give a shit if i die right this moment, i don’t care about myself currently but maybe that’ll change, who knows anymore. 

sorry that this is formatted terribly and is pretty nonsensical i just needed to get that out",2.5124025974025983,4.532496214285717,3.948051948051951,86.34922077922081,77.11688311688313,6.218181818181819,20.740259740259734,7.1686216300943375,0.6227064935064939,603,15,117,7,14,199,96,154,0.14300000000000002,0.696,0.16,0.584,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,7,10,1,3,2,0,15,5,2,1,0,22,27,10,2,4,9,1,0,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,11,7,1,0,2,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,1,3,19,4,21,23,2,13,0,0,1,0,9,7,1,4,5,85,30,0,0.14189116203506585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649085583911653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071790544618154,0.29764079888628525,0.0,0.23352867288865697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184731935014823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14890602056676822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893349924899585,0.0,0.15010203533642627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945212489339292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14519008192930774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376235957662613,0.15966700538064554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962475981204607,0.0,0.1482645516431565,0.1361149318868124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15082367011340786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595934376001647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25058499128711864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425487437326442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299291817386922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21042099750523088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791462258830647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836946599166883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28870864516642064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24234855419561685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306888543126985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564923879820713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883553909772052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833545043325372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404674130209475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942661831899383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,echolives,2020/03/31,"Dont know if im depressed? (I have been in the past) So yeah it sounds weird. I have been (deeply) depressed before + anxiety (diagnosed ""mild PTSD"") as well and ""recovered"" (i think). I didn't use any anti depressants or anything like that. I was actually pretty seriously down deep at some points. Deep enough to think about ending my own life. But i didn't and now Im better, or at least i believe so.  Im just always so out of energy. Like whenever i sleep i always feel tired after an hour of being awake. I also cant get myself to do any school work at all. And when the stress of not having done it gets to me, i just hide from it. I see that my appearance has gotten rougher over the past year. I have big black/purple/blueish bags under my eyes, a really sick look overall and just look like a wreak. I dont feel this big sadness and hopelessness like i did before. Or at least its not effecting me as much. I just dont have any energy or motivation anymore. I just feel so damn neutral. Like im not ok but not bad either. I just am. Anyone know what im talking about?",1.2461302211302223,3.2768357342342327,3.2283374283374293,89.89002457002456,81.29729729729729,6.55888615888616,20.000819000819,7.686295010490155,0.6517045045045049,831,22,181,14,22,280,127,222,0.12,0.755,0.125,0.2359,0,0,0,0,0,1,38.0,0,0,0,4,16,18,1,1,6,2,20,6,2,3,1,37,35,20,0,1,18,0,3,5,0,0,4,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,9,0,0,1,10,10,1,0,8,8,24,8,21,26,8,23,0,5,4,0,1,14,1,7,13,117,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.09668564792395083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923248682054453,0.1648813455092417,0.0,0.0,0.2021289197628001,0.0,0.0757942515100315,0.0,0.0982585619876252,0.06927750664158745,0.0,0.08153259355361096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082725830736512,0.0,0.0,0.16861583342626876,0.11162676068823978,0.0,0.08762626921536244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560067111251488,0.10056188898851746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139099609957726,0.34835535730905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775352954788702,0.10237386026142092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502901492025826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352813021203104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757168263204312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5351051694061786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089011437300978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998158547957327,0.24202206052927736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16640080974618898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728335885131036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18916195619390644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366055281610748,0.0,0.0,0.10079774928961543,0.0,0.0,0.11581665490056108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347178048360723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027203064932662,0.07895218488928693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09914936025588203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134932936830087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963498862626524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12697011685263984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11387536472750713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557141442842034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08908284766231325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212982383332202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380285960316058
mentalhealth,kylianjdv,2020/03/31,"Getting social interaction..... again So a brief history of me: I am 18 years old now and a male. I have some minor mental health problems which became big problems in my life. At the age 14 I quit school because it wasnt sustainable for me. Afterwards I fell in a huge downwards spiral. Which made me cut almost all ties with the outide world. But after much time, effort and therapy I am getting on the right track again. And I want to try to make social contact again. So I started greeting people I passed in the street, just a normal hi nothing weird. And when they responded I felt so happy inside, so I concluded I needed more social intetaction. And I know with the corona stuffs going on this might not be the best time but I just wanted some general advice (and tbh I just wanted to type this out)",2.8817307692307668,5.212891403846157,4.123692307692308,84.0213076923077,77.26923076923076,6.467692307692308,22.57948717948718,7.554174236665415,1.1283671794871792,633,19,116,9,15,207,104,156,0.052000000000000005,0.887,0.061,0.1116,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,4,12,6,1,0,10,0,6,2,0,3,1,33,18,13,0,7,6,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,6,9,0,0,3,0,0,4,2,4,0,0,3,1,19,2,15,13,6,30,0,0,0,0,9,13,0,4,13,83,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214600117424815,0.0,0.0,0.15590876704045695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491187946838686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339514186896176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494942191848882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16269125558297326,0.0,0.08848659719472861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16574310850597074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654993859991555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556739009767474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099738977806425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732493872518013,0.10392943107951824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15690667215701884,0.16517066662519414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445573236512895,0.11544787983961717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15255069898837784,0.14939615285830016,0.0,0.16337855648029184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794118861081038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979633639104877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16560368081790175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296499444350846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15757439579738053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4761426265513036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020364119045817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17823662870023926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17805390167483856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815771746992596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570852547687236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755036317415225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026422110940507
mentalhealth,Nath23_,2020/03/31,I have more bad than good days Lately i have noticed that my mental health kinda goes up and down throughout the week. Most days it's down. And it is weird cus i remember feeling okay. To feel so useless and alone and unhappy is just so confusing to me when i know that a few days ago i was trying to live my best life. It's like i just have a little reservoir of energy and after two days of feeling okay it's empty and i got to go through that slump again. Feeling alone sucks man. It really does.,0.6564102564102541,2.9477943846153885,2.313076923076924,93.91525641025645,85.92307692307692,5.38974358974359,19.243589743589748,6.816661863887847,0.20358589743589794,392,11,85,5,12,128,66,104,0.198,0.631,0.171,-0.6402,0,2,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,6,10,1,1,3,2,6,2,0,0,0,17,14,9,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,8,6,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,5,0,1,2,4,10,5,12,12,4,15,0,1,0,0,1,4,1,3,11,56,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15833705903798426,0.0,0.0,0.3699957210084591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14914137532882335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18745209819799447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4607840032053605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15631275662808644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36126530816134944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151463572800072,0.14981912288638966,0.14285981968028294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898661539209117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816562859622154,0.0,0.20149267528938972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261655496619705,0.08726537442028004,0.17902552913288944,0.15772593416608838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18000831959059102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20336160327435795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442941765124275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023431817417154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127217903422842,0.0,0.17448711489640747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327928143627028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Musictheory_nerd,2020/03/31,"TW (suicidal ideation): One final vent I'm probably going to off myself tonight. I am at an all time low. I've been dieting to help myself feel better about myself, but my mom is catching on, so she'll probably make me eat and gain weight. I just want to shrink myself out of existence because I'm dirty and I hate myself. Honestly, the past few days I've realized that I should just stop existing for real.  

To make matters worse, I don't have a single friend. This pandemic has just made that even more painfully obvious. I don't have dance, theater, or school to distract myself from my loneliness and at least get the chance to be around people. Even though I'm often ostracized and sometimes even bullied, at least I had some kind of human interaction. Now I have nothing. I literally haven't had anything resembling human contact with anyone other than my family for weeks. I'm basically realizing that everything in my life up to this point has just been a distraction from what a social reject I am. I feel so unheard in this world. No one even likes me or misses me enough to shoot me a text. How much trouble would that be now that people have so much time on their hands? I've tried texting people/forming friendships in the past, but I am always ghosted or subtly rejected. It's not even a one time occurrence. It's more like a pattern. There must be something inherently wrong with me. There is no other explanation. I guess there just isn't a place for me in this world.

I'm sorry for the long, negative rant, but I really just wanted to put the truth into the world before I leave it. FUCK YOU WORLD. IF YOU DON'T CARE THEN I DON'T CARE EITHER!!!!!!!",3.7679008511617202,5.730709990683232,4.7822291235334715,82.01776282493678,73.3167701863354,8.000184034966644,25.90108120542903,8.735056554316923,1.9856607775477344,1315,45,247,26,27,429,179,322,0.254,0.662,0.084,-0.9968,1,1,1,1,0,1,44.0,0,2,1,2,24,20,2,2,14,0,28,7,1,4,4,46,48,17,2,6,15,1,4,2,1,4,2,0,0,2,15,9,3,1,4,1,0,4,10,11,0,3,5,4,36,9,35,36,12,39,0,4,0,1,12,21,1,7,16,180,51,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930227547343914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07816996506217071,0.0,0.0919981145177065,0.0995216360226502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681494573808725,0.0,0.09512967806456696,0.0,0.0,0.09887397418228287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279657863320463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720988046975575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439463616132622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551456551859884,0.0,0.3691991406146024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047452520074747,0.0,0.10539078325817702,0.0,0.11305425846356745,0.0,0.0,0.1224664306658448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637287303879118,0.10335307495316592,0.05840849876060785,0.0,0.06353592003526977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12315527170061855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037484350415044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493412117266686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641773833909325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11837521994844742,0.0,0.0,0.0789644194361006,0.10923520162887124,0.0,0.0,0.0989354388603304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578354036425404,0.14924863723367868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093345818214236,0.0,0.0,0.16436501096602882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727073164191424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272664329725451,0.0,0.11895822125581487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21344277852362825,0.15500975165755335,0.0,0.1168024314491006,0.0,0.10568281822290117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410687671661861,0.0,0.0,0.11238528674003784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12724767615588267,0.07161901608997706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131429451282452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11396136366042844,0.0,0.08606558498182519,0.11056854033281456,0.12514583271203528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346598658305907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228605690337732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983844381002243,0.0,0.19556644538834692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590175952822091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131879684010108,0.0,0.0896755517346037,0.13613671767473876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139290956262638,0.0794162669538346,0.12223075437956088,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blackpatota,2020/03/31,"Do yoy guys feel like you don't deserve to be with your boyfriend/girlfriend because you feel like a messed up person and don't deserve happiness? I feel like this sometimes, my boyfriend is so cute and so sweet to me. I feel a little sad whenever he said something wholesome and genuine, it's like, I don't believe it because I feel like there's no way people would treat me like that. I'm a piece of shit. Does anyone feel like this?",2.5888636363636373,4.627948340909093,2.913636363636368,93.76545454545456,76.95454545454545,5.3090909090909095,26.90909090909091,5.985473137389443,0.7919272727272735,346,14,72,2,8,106,54,88,0.138,0.586,0.275,0.9151,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,3,0,0,3,14,1,0,3,0,7,1,1,0,0,11,15,5,0,1,0,0,6,7,0,1,0,1,0,2,5,4,0,0,6,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,8,10,11,5,12,1,3,0,1,0,0,7,2,1,0,7,38,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232578525573023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784175478575058,0.0,0.0,0.16487741110649015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280649407614433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.443969717701224,0.5227340574793173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14490166748946154,0.0,0.1557838658319133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5004674393001652,0.14667321002942382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10145517238008102,0.1277802599495796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392048304830095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15021804256364651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266128313802898,0.14473605949723514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615953177789368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039572151742262,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garyplscomehome_,2020/03/31,"need a friend:( i have a history of anxiety and depression and a family history of that along with bi polar disorder. I’m 18 yrs old and for the past two years i was using nicotine and weed daily to self medicate and just be normal ig. I had a lot of stress from work, school, personal life that was all building up but i was still the normal functioning me  until a week or two ago when  i had panic attacks that would go on for hours and hours and no matter what i did they did not go away. I was diagnosed with panic disorder and to treat that currently I’m on 1mg of clonazepam 3x a day & 100 mg of zoloft 1x a day. since I’ve been on these the physical panic attacks have stopped however now I’m suddenly feeling like I’m going crazy. I have constant ringing in my ears, anxiety, an insane amount of paranoia (fear of death),I’m constantly confused, i lost interest in so many things,i feel insanely empty inside like there’s just some void that can’t be filled, no appetite, heavy depression/isolation, detaching, very vivid dreams & even some hallucinations but very minor, & i feel like i can’t function properly(form conversations, think, focus) at all. is there anyone else who has gone through this? i just want to be “normal” again and i feel so hopeless. Hope this makes sense, all love xx",6.290131752305669,6.522185865612649,6.7524268774703575,76.69240843214756,65.83794466403162,10.699235836627144,32.676943346508565,10.504223727775694,3.361549354413702,1036,40,197,25,15,338,157,253,0.223,0.655,0.12300000000000001,-0.9797,2,1,0,0,0,1,36.0,0,0,1,2,12,19,2,6,11,0,20,7,1,2,3,42,40,16,0,7,7,0,4,3,1,1,4,2,0,2,10,12,0,1,5,1,0,5,5,11,0,2,11,7,16,8,26,25,7,32,0,3,1,2,7,8,0,6,22,118,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853616525998785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3246545772631896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528133879432849,0.0,0.0,0.06983729166296505,0.1023372122987816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22725217210326654,0.09383903397339996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21586611146088586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288265959492206,0.0,0.08602510982879764,0.10137446210071746,0.0,0.0,0.2289385730019481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343557763882031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596873375678605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415645591162627,0.11239095512554907,0.20200605733368215,0.14270628167909954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716579534583211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170289569979299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992017761721819,0.19672018778833225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054705968935387,0.14638660699063194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902905974346534,0.08491303438255285,0.09014414530886827,0.0,0.06666960002156001,0.10126100960260276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061696886965996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405855966204024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935788441904275,0.0,0.0,0.10480556758082277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.351557307393698,0.0,0.0,0.09534522348355227,0.0,0.087209956518448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108226161088542,0.0,0.0,0.10419494207489392,0.0,0.0,0.08262043524236322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976301022910262,0.08350280520627644,0.11441035679498307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399803856245842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19513334571284188,0.0,0.0,0.08626285957962862,0.0,0.1648202615670011,0.05891086141146745,0.0,0.08011641883869254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271265651500892,0.0,0.0,0.07095074167716184,0.0,0.0,0.06431840767725172
mentalhealth,ManiacBottlez,2020/03/31,"I Have No Motivation Anymore I'm absolutely tired of doing anything. All I feel like doing is listening to music and staring off into space. But in my mind, I'm thinking of things that deep down I want to do. But when I try to actually do them, I instantly back away with no reasoning and stop whatever I was trying to do. It's like as soon as I get to doing what I wanted to do, I've suddenly lost all will and motivation to do it and I'm no longer interested in it. This is affecting me pretty badly, as it's even starting to come down to things like sleeping, taking care of myself. I just don't feel like doing all that because I feel like it's a lot of work. So I just think, I don't really need that, I don't need to do it. This is ruining me. What do I do?",1.8150629370629403,2.9642696484848514,4.735757575757578,83.71594405594406,76.75757575757576,8.228438228438227,24.207459207459213,8.841846274778883,1.629396270396271,592,19,133,13,13,215,83,165,0.115,0.72,0.165,0.8078,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,4,7,10,0,0,1,0,21,2,1,4,3,30,40,11,0,4,4,0,3,5,0,1,1,1,0,0,15,7,0,1,8,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,2,5,19,7,25,37,4,16,0,2,1,0,2,9,0,1,11,101,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.1554581169327356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157987160939641,0.0,0.0,0.13109394966723542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14967173015699034,0.12249525227147932,0.13301252196303082,0.09711048517215012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242145546098768,0.0,0.0,0.13722663700361026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521905543531973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416472774423608,0.3414212909934077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832299752750715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3891404214993296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738995737511541,0.1354349062514781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16085203397471415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23624439187416002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16206984833929933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020544794829393,0.16379145791139293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15941945026410276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127564760458413,0.0,0.0,0.13318561369385234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197770850248853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21166953285117407,0.20415165742247854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18309697608367986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2163144646042091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18792372809362892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597550234795995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crasher03,2020/03/31,"Please someone help me somehow Today i watched 2 videos of 2 people getting murdered. The first one was a female getting her head chopped of with a machete, but the thing what disturbs me that he stabbed her in the stomach, and that view is wow for me. I mean that stabbing fked me up idk how to say it. And the second was a guy digging his own grave and then getting sliced with a machete till death.
Please help me somehow get this off my mind.",3.5025361155698254,5.061181853932588,3.4225040128410957,93.17044943820228,73.15730337078651,5.085714285714285,30.69181380417336,3.1291,0.9371207062600319,351,16,72,0,7,106,63,89,0.196,0.6609999999999999,0.14300000000000002,-0.7615,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,1,1,8,0,3,2,2,1,0,11,8,7,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,7,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,3,2,3,11,1,10,6,1,7,0,1,2,0,8,3,0,2,4,51,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19224100982066486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.472316263799396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237819634728853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319478675044688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30297478016362644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24618732993504405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282021334873129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531478506072622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15668444727418873,0.0,0.0,0.4961745276904381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17972943664867555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149457042139612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501486732784929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.214227731715262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CoffeeSleepLove,2020/03/31,"Thia is a big step for me! Monday was my first therapy session,  of course over the phone! We just went through the questionnaire and got everything started and set up. I didnt think I'd be able to make myself comfortable enough to get something started to help better myself, but I did. I'm so proud of myself for taking the first step!",4.224090909090911,5.74440534848485,4.576181818181818,85.76427272727273,71.27272727272728,7.704242424242422,26.83636363636364,8.238735603445708,1.6970400000000003,267,9,52,4,5,84,50,66,0.0,0.82,0.18,0.9064,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,0,4,2,3,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,1,0,7,14,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,5,0,8,3,10,8,1,12,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,35,8,1,0.2663235337919485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23554152308656795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751834031751641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23935441953161102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4530693235839822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391430543078009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130032590912422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17851105084158836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17777302684225768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205028867703672,0.0,0.0,0.3770103359552937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20024215303881554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30456417121721163,0.0,0.0,0.17064936678091006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24688458400644536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elpis_png,2020/03/31,"Sucidal thoughts??? I constantly have these suicidal thoughts. They come to me naturally such as when youre thirsty you drink water, when youre tired you sleep, and when im even remotely apethetic i want to kill myself. Its not an angry or sad burst screaming and crying and im gonna kill myself its more like eh i dont really wanna be here anymore. Of course i could never kill myself because of my religion, but it always comes to my mind and whenever i realize im having suicidal thoughts it just makes me more tired(?) I dont really know. Thanks for reading though :)",2.4168918918918934,4.996719810810814,3.9634459459459457,83.12192567567571,80.62162162162161,8.024324324324324,25.466216216216218,8.841846274778883,2.3626810810810817,453,18,85,12,12,150,73,111,0.243,0.685,0.073,-0.9678,0,0,1,0,0,3,15.0,0,4,1,0,8,7,3,0,1,0,6,5,1,1,1,21,16,11,5,3,4,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,6,2,0,5,2,0,2,4,5,0,0,3,1,18,2,8,10,2,7,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,6,56,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690379481568896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741542249266732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831885466569438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213444412453612,0.0,0.1388388242554771,0.0,0.102579043129277,0.0,0.141126794901118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30114997364271545,0.12585930029002013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485835382340096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41633410783979496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4264248429855269,0.0,0.07060802111093696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627677476060915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08575990754578018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297259204216171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908997480695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851253554835165,0.0,0.16461229562262816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857055274706666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810676500248849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118285066910262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262287543888446,0.30599098920027396,0.0,0.2953325881176491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577951609813033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lolidonotknow,2020/03/31,"My Mental Health is deteriorating and due to Corona I no longer have my professional support system My mental health support was through my college. When Corona shut everything down and I had to go to my parents’s house, out of state, and I was informed at the last minute that I would not be able to use the counseling or psychiatric centers because my group therapists and my individual therapist are not licensed to practice in my parents’ state. And to top it off my psychiatrist quit unexpectedly. 

My friends were the only ones that understood my mental health problems and now every single one of them are hundreds of miles away. (I’m now in Texas and all of them are in Iowa or Florida). I can’t talk to my family about the depression or anxiety because I really am the first person they know who has been professional diagnosed and tries to openly talk about their mental health issues. So they just don’t /get/ what my issue is.

I just feel real alone. Abandoned by my college. I have zero motivation and I’m afraid I’m going to fail all my classes. I have no privacy at home, someone can waltz thro my door at any moment with no warning. I have sleep issues so I don’t fall a sleep til around 4-6am, but my family hates me “sleeping in to ridiculous hours” so they wake me up at any where from 8am-11am. They think waking me up early will make me fall asleep earlier, but it’s the anxiety that keeps me up at night.",5.263423923444979,6.444113876363637,6.059827751196173,77.39584688995215,68.41818181818181,9.134928229665071,30.110047846889948,9.414487439383343,2.6824181818181816,1136,43,211,23,19,373,156,275,0.099,0.868,0.033,-0.9337,2,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,7,5,12,10,2,1,7,0,23,11,6,3,2,37,39,19,0,2,9,2,1,0,1,2,5,0,2,1,7,13,0,2,6,0,0,4,8,7,0,4,6,1,40,3,38,30,3,41,0,3,0,0,16,23,0,3,11,150,47,7,0.09633666678618304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977573317192602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102447387934354,0.0,0.147394572812755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08576005799913201,0.0,0.0,0.0905114696547678,0.0,0.0,0.11745187581648772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297462993943877,0.09777968891707092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116779673372766,0.0,0.08658118428328762,0.0,0.18163527140446475,0.0,0.0487107133200553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194391955471825,0.0,0.0,0.07442946978557059,0.0,0.050331932246490914,0.0,0.10950069562789022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511251380962772,0.0,0.4096054875523192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663353159823164,0.0,0.0948722112406393,0.11115957906278197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30165135321892617,0.0,0.08562845584202175,0.0,0.0,0.052944112644194935,0.07852724131437419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06430547314625451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3883388059785041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040543575405033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13056043725370087,0.07326837618735665,0.0,0.0,0.21394093558036628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411746155923401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218117956333928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246590344181312,0.0,0.1096522175831155,0.06171573558456502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892187199244157,0.0,0.08162574514363287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21864341565561796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15486352718930746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22370859057340475,0.0,0.06172864617247231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06540627304292837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832039490025897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06843480405090349,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,burn-after-use,2020/03/31,"Should I stop taking the psych meds my doctor gave me or finish them before requesting to stop? So ~3 weeks ago (before the quarantine, so hell I might not even be able to do anything till after things open up) I was prescribed Lamactal because I reported mood instability. 

I’m two and a half weeks in, so I already increased from one to two pills as instructed, but things have gotten worse. Like I’ve been pretty consistently wishing I were dead for almost a day now, when usually (without meds) the suicidal thoughts only last an hour or two. The quarantine hasn’t been helping either because the park where I go to (sorta) meditate is closed.

I’m also worried that because of my regular marijuana use that that’s effecting the meds badly. Thing is, It keeps me calm and gets me out of breakdowns.

Anyways should I just stop the meds and tell my psychiatrist that they’ve been making things worse? Or just commit to them at least until I can see the doctor again?",6.1061355311355285,7.156985895604402,6.3392857142857135,76.62654761904763,66.41758241758242,9.143589743589745,31.100732600732602,9.2995712137729,2.7724600732600733,771,29,136,14,12,247,121,182,0.182,0.72,0.098,-0.9652,0,2,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,2,1,12,5,1,0,11,0,15,3,0,3,1,30,28,15,2,3,9,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,9,6,0,4,2,0,0,2,3,2,0,5,8,1,17,2,18,16,3,26,1,0,1,0,6,7,1,6,18,97,26,5,0.11036555222795634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783240297371174,0.0,0.110515158285309,0.0,0.12179113129686005,0.08825929224272093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09082144572911788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215062613814724,0.2018334487864256,0.0,0.18782591227794468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117665087270021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259276385883713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728954063642521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05766144586892391,0.0,0.06272328670629676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397570325240369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868783749701227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980979738110196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08996265535981683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05391903403920493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366986311471896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4903649935700126,0.0,0.0,0.11708040999026452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478655447260495,0.0839379757316145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122814437480702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794705604946478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768116305146006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12072200108340635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298116011297814,0.0,0.09646435720586037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29328787543816554,0.0,0.0,0.08761792051718395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234333233542733,0.0,0.0,0.09532040172822928,0.12155206345132052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17705717769955998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269149383560608,0.10638845394383432,0.0,0.0,0.11208157555888244,0.22494385302639475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Persimmon_Leaves,2020/03/31,"Seeking remote therapy from a licensed professional -- what are my options? Hello,

I am an American but live abroad (in Romania) and am seeking a therapist at the moment. I have been in therapy on and off for the past fifteen years, and am struggling with problems related to addiction, self worth, past emotional trauma, and various related things. I don't really have the option to find a therapist to see face to face because, aside from coronavirus, I don't speak Romanian and also have to move frequently due to my residency status here in Europe.

I've heard of things like betterhelp and am not really sure how they stack up as I've heard a lot of bad things. I'm seeking help from a licensed, professional therapist that can guide me through some new emotional and psychological territory that I'm dealing with, and think there's no reason why doing it via videoconferencing shouldn't work. However, it's all quite sensitive and serious for me, so I really want to find someone who is well trained, knows what they are doing, and who I can really trust. I just don't really know how to go about finding someone?

Also, I don't have any health insurance, and I am a bit worried about pricing. I can afford something in the range of $70USD per week for a 50 minute session without too much difficulty, once it gets above that I start having a harder time.

Any advice here would help, I don't really know where to look. Thanks!",9.806890547263675,7.929578395522393,9.89537313432836,63.89577114427863,59.82089552238807,14.007960199004975,40.61691542288557,12.745084868956482,5.257267661691542,1142,49,199,34,12,381,155,268,0.094,0.785,0.121,0.7571,2,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,2,2,14,10,0,1,13,0,26,4,2,3,2,37,41,18,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,2,2,4,0,1,13,13,0,0,8,0,2,2,9,5,1,0,3,6,18,5,33,36,6,21,0,0,2,0,12,9,0,4,11,134,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302443386917772,0.0,0.10131304065583203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582268028830496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141009328302257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656688394038964,0.06320120824134848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318963421642395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688756994036247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332478185217869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842797188770523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05416752876846545,0.0,0.058922654226177186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020497346522218,0.0,0.0,0.13898649170889482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709363191580181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050651883307361936,0.0,0.09154966291038716,0.0,0.08706349308697528,0.0,0.0,0.08814341415320166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019341384568092,0.07621533380375184,0.0,0.0,0.10013295628551357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041379418721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19794495820696065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920594090159099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11027442271219733,0.0,0.0,0.3985130790972567,0.1065983556900276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826180234795096,0.0,0.10815887099970717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17569223755058294,0.07981646762717289,0.0,0.0,0.07338389372167993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838686239803463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771538348637387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545286607609033,0.2371298889236361,0.36113479976171375,0.20663737083118636,0.0664327409687105,0.0,0.0,0.06045553461969951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06115203034812015,0.0,0.08316431908858064,0.0,0.09321906429957756,0.0,0.09355336031761533,0.0,0.0,0.09994198988237674,0.0,0.07547889253971615,0.10529014451530956,0.0,0.07364994848672941,0.0,0.0,0.06676529801101218
mentalhealth,deadsh0t97,2020/03/31,Finishing counseling I (M 22) am coming to the end of my counseling and I don't know if I am ready. I mentioned this to the counselor and there is nothing they can do as it is a set amount of sessions person. I'm finding my self getting worried more than ever and this whole covid thing isn't helping.   Sorry but I needed to vent,2.1762254901960816,3.9838684852941166,3.9270588235294133,87.09343137254903,77.38235294117645,6.298039215686276,27.509803921568626,7.1686216300943375,1.471109803921569,259,11,52,3,6,87,49,68,0.05,0.903,0.047,-0.0472,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,1,10,13,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,8,0,7,13,3,5,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,3,39,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25403999722206794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612039037109781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667641816211146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695436124909045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15407899770301653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19767284777104488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207555415403102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21867301409514905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28297537455974503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575051977519183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3076568345504172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301290887480277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19592598314601992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32925796761463555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994967705517545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nordicflava,2020/03/31,"I have anxiety about starting anti-anxiety medication. I (34F) have crippling anxiety, which is really rearing its ugly head during this pandemic. I took 20 mg Citalopram daily for about 8 years, then I got pregnant so I stopped. I did well off of it for a couple of years, but in the past 4 years (starting around the time of my separation and eventual divorce) the anxiety has come creeping back and it’s been bad during the past 2 years or so. The problem is, I’m terrified of restarting the medication that could possibly help me. I have frequent chest pain and heart arrhythmia and have seen a cardiologist who assured me all is well, but it’s still a huge concern in my life and one of the potential side effects of citalopram is increased heart palpitations, as well as increased anxiety initially. I need the help of anxiety meds now more than ever—I’m on edge, irritable, fighting off panic attacks every other day, and I’m getting visibly frustrated at my 2 young kids who are with me full time right now. But I can’t handle the prospect of having worsening heart symptoms and increased anxiety even if it’s just for a few weeks, because I’d have to ride it out solo since I can’t call in anyone to help me (I’m in a U.S. “hot spot” for COVID-19 and everyone is under a stay at home order). I’d be afraid to seek medical care right now also. It’s a Catch-22, and I feel like either choice I make is wrong (starting vs. not starting). I have the pills, it’s just a matter of taking the plunge. I’d appreciate insight from anyone who has had a similar fear or concern about starting medication.",6.105559529892695,6.603377239482202,6.982405041730541,73.96867143587127,66.24919093851132,10.259308465338103,35.68063362289218,10.186864033877496,3.73410291262136,1273,60,231,29,19,425,172,309,0.192,0.6709999999999999,0.138,-0.9671,0,0,0,0,3,0,38.0,0,0,0,1,18,16,3,3,20,0,23,13,5,2,2,35,41,21,0,4,11,0,2,1,0,0,8,0,1,1,15,13,0,1,3,0,0,6,3,10,3,1,6,3,20,6,36,33,8,49,0,0,1,0,10,17,0,3,25,151,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968782013768589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4666463801729897,0.0,0.0,0.12186411448528373,0.0,0.0,0.07757529401721723,0.0,0.0991371660425802,0.0,0.06700719810240374,0.07276034167858365,0.05312125488202174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898222842860815,0.0,0.0888475793170732,0.0,0.0,0.07506554156277681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957618978065927,0.09642151098531808,0.0,0.05619969884166705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057556794740720174,0.07882537388565365,0.07342130874506142,0.08326838643431504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805953163697466,0.044061862780339,0.0622546143836693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04552835589868312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969581223963255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894333383884424,0.0,0.0,0.3097928212027668,0.17522932844175973,0.0,0.08741102560507527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155131988847344,0.04257342032370276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058168290724423824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679566481155097,0.35114757521437023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461505435251662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05905000849623255,0.0,0.09272575651373696,0.10224293959145388,0.0,0.0,0.16637473982093515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824006741405128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338359691352255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582571240226916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883842570144956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720851706835208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30839952519089525,0.09288230281945006,0.06959210744569078,0.07285502609844463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905744164517403,0.06552030969007303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162697685456228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681851606849336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990045149965979,0.0,0.2350546996955217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527663619579828,0.0,0.22446763355367427
mentalhealth,ImpossibleSun1,2020/03/31,"Just need somewhere to let this out Throw away account because I fear people I know reading this. Depression runs in my family and I always thought it was a choice.....until it was not a choice for me. Not having medical insurance kept me from getting the help I needed. It all came down on me and a few years ago I tried to end my life. I died that day, but was given a second chance when my heart began to beat again. I saw some doctors and got medication that helped, but the resources for those living just above poverty, but can’t afford insurance suck. I can’t afford to get the help I need. Fast forward to today....I have been struggling, but coping. Everything feels like it is falling in on me. How do I cope through this current world crisis. How are you guys coping? This financially have become critical as I am sure it has for many.  It all feels overwhelming and my brain can’t find a way out. My brain is telling me the solution is to go. Is there hope? Sorry if this does not make sense.",2.3826475279106845,4.582454393939393,3.43279638490165,89.01217703349285,78.2929292929293,6.390643274853801,23.047315257841568,7.475848149327749,0.9706323232323228,782,25,158,11,19,251,123,198,0.14800000000000002,0.754,0.098,-0.8885,3,0,0,0,0,1,29.0,0,1,0,1,7,8,1,3,9,0,19,7,3,3,3,34,38,13,1,5,10,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,14,7,0,1,5,1,1,6,6,5,0,1,11,3,22,3,20,26,4,25,0,2,1,0,6,10,1,3,11,108,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12323799463281762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568061330312936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061932749406094,0.0,0.0,0.0847488450390964,0.1535430874384853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31039757116970146,0.0,0.15900849284492974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966014788156408,0.0,0.11974272877345947,0.0,0.14428684425130395,0.0,0.0,0.14229881034017144,0.12166242558384127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231356050165768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12494743603057455,0.0,0.13106116324563888,0.1564426907791462,0.1405912563322623,0.0993200683810633,0.0,0.0,0.12706707415501114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452704981277911,0.0,0.0790115732160883,0.0,0.1111916426765289,0.0,0.0,0.13765741219332014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16474625744846838,0.2795582151701313,0.0,0.0,0.1380840013069593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640495082813263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216331278635833,0.09819804300115503,0.06792098962667588,0.0,0.12276233969682047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092800809539266,0.1409503531271529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28010776010271565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3092576356117405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638299355309274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390634350726694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15562801512162494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533996518812306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103018317938867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151468812218008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037096596039676,0.0,0.0,0.1317802145906232,0.0,0.0,0.09438940093831746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11035221901290763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952806524705825
mentalhealth,humanoidform,2020/03/31,"I consider myself very manipulative and toxic, I’m scared of this dark side of myself. How do I fix this? Hello, 
I’m currently a college student and due to quarantine I’m forced to stuck with my emotionally and physically abusive parents. And last week my mom did a lot of things that made me really upset and when I called my boyfriend to rant, he said something as a joke which really triggered everything in my mind and we started a fight. Looking back I realized that I was so manipulative and toxic in the way I texted him and I was sick to the stomach when I went back to read the things I’ve sent. It took me two days to completely calm down and analyze the situation and this time I’m really concerned for my mental health and for the people who deeply care for me. Due to the condition I grew up, I would say that my mom’s psychological manipulation on my mental health has really influenced me to be very extreme when I’m upset. 

I have this violent side of me that constantly gets jealous, irrelevant, manipulative, etc. My boyfriend has always been so nice and understanding to me. He is always willing to put anyone before him and help them out. Sometimes when I’m upset, I find myself only remembering the mistakes he did and the negative things that happened in our relationship, and I lashes out to insult and manipulate him. The thing about this is that I would feel guilty immediately after and apologize. 

It’s really hard to explain and its also unbelievable how my characters can be so extremely different. I’m generally really soft, gentle, reserved, and kind, like everyone described and that’s how I feel most of the time, but when I get very close to someone such as my boyfriend, best friends, and my sister, I could explode when I’m triggered with pent up anger and end up hurting them in a way I just couldn’t believe that I did it. I can feel so hopeful and inspired, like right now, and when that dark side takes over I’m all over the place and can only think about the bad things that has happened to my life. I don’t think this is a normal thing at all and my boyfriend and I recently talked about this and we wanted to take a break so that he can help me out as a friend first. I’m going to seek professional help at my university next school year.

I have dealt with severe suicidal thoughts before and it has gotten a little bit better when I go away to college and away from my parents. But during this quarantine I realized that it’s still there. When this dark side looms over I found myself contemplating suicide a lot because my biggest fear is to become just like my mom. When it takes over, my mind just feels bigger than my head. It’s a mess and I literally can’t see any good memories or think positively when I’m upset and angry. 

Based on the summary of information I gave I want to ask if anyone has experienced this pattern? If so, how do you overcome with this?

The cost for professional psychological help is very expensive, though I know that I highly considering to seek professional help, and I will. However, I would like to reach out from this community to ask if anyone is experiencing the same thing. If anyone is having similar situation or has been through a similar situations, it’d be wonderful if I can contact you in DMs and I can share more details with you.",6.312966803311633,6.813147771159875,7.1768338557993765,72.7453745679608,65.8025078369906,10.618824853307613,32.34643517402138,10.504223727775694,3.373245591190419,2650,102,494,65,39,886,276,638,0.12,0.748,0.132,0.9,5,2,1,0,1,1,52.0,3,3,2,3,35,32,5,6,27,0,44,6,2,13,2,109,94,69,2,15,12,6,6,4,2,5,4,2,0,0,43,46,0,0,19,2,2,7,4,15,0,2,17,12,76,17,71,66,10,75,0,1,2,0,46,34,0,12,35,347,119,8,0.0,0.07811340433728775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052722263658469264,0.1097140594613696,0.0,0.0,0.04483301664241384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843923934399123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326677955672305,0.0,0.1238822673418506,0.10138848247485224,0.05504677733181253,0.04018884218541003,0.07281183486192899,0.11219903329586266,0.07427780881945291,0.06918693009995237,0.05830758889903283,0.07197584465754024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731943256170564,0.0,0.06721756388586388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912381560161232,0.07124429514487432,0.0,0.05263780980263307,0.0,0.0,0.04251783645984095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888029141810284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415965635393085,0.05839226947733931,0.0,0.07352668131130483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06299663004713757,0.05925145983745095,0.0,0.0,0.07418685892278022,0.1333398658301305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06025661574292511,0.0560779677318054,0.0,0.07228619099999234,0.10187097291931496,0.0,0.06888888126747204,0.0,0.07493632852075971,0.05529692802813189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659908640310013,0.0,0.05905816414551258,0.0,0.06766071943499788,0.14015587391076165,0.0,0.0,0.2209493432412818,0.06965611025930972,0.0,0.06548096477651429,0.0,0.0,0.07057684028122377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865343164134048,0.036232075016471216,0.05373977872213722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04656660101112813,0.1288355461091698,0.06607675715179978,0.0,0.0,0.05536256475384641,0.0,0.0,0.11209854557080147,0.0,0.062382272330552324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287899302966938,0.0,0.13313612834190455,0.23164076237306944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011473159131848,0.0,0.0645950327952357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028179413245528,0.0,0.0,0.14640955603761135,0.0,0.0,0.045705884433890516,0.0,0.06888029141810284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06627542942146915,0.0,0.0,0.06594542313017122,0.0,0.2534093839393308,0.0,0.06509553384997767,0.07078155056332815,0.07468309880735065,0.05630179496818371,0.06271222792722707,0.05242825949698361,0.06600501093202495,0.06672223288204468,0.05253574733269479,0.0,0.0,0.07447940233465469,0.0,0.0,0.2223160939173603,0.0,0.0,0.05586022644660831,0.05075427370020954,0.06520406454995223,0.0,0.04666388200157881,0.0,0.05264985229916919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422814887284088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14870801105442485,0.05299009327199988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3065954930250126,0.12673119788502787,0.06477351476918691,0.052339136076572784,0.07688580670127569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324796960357832,0.0,0.0,0.06440166814739477,0.06863293812099057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21758863920727106,0.07777159220099013,0.1046604921323382,0.05288312974246928,0.0,0.0,0.061115529190434524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149565060282792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14049918849938714,0.0,0.0,0.04245520140975692
mentalhealth,cloudyfrownygirl,2020/03/31,I don’t think I’m worth helping That’s it basically. I think about the people who care about me and a part of me wants to get better for them. But I don’t feel like I can. I don’t feel like I’m worth anything. Why should I take up any time and resources when I’m just plain no good? The damage I’ve done and the pain I’ve caused. I just want to die. I’m not worth fixing.,-0.8791989664082678,0.7935165581395403,1.3087596899224818,102.69890180878555,86.90697674418604,4.28733850129199,14.206718346253233,5.033348758259628,-1.4148692506459946,288,4,78,1,9,96,53,86,0.14,0.601,0.258,0.765,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,1,1,5,7,0,0,4,0,6,1,0,1,0,15,19,5,1,3,4,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,3,0,5,2,0,0,1,2,10,5,7,17,1,3,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,40,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15550167363443249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881737868319988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022377332247231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23314165462586314,0.23490440958018075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373206597239185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340061422697241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312422166921535,0.3267200731199807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946927882788627,0.0,0.0,0.1917953664327484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327093840901154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234306828310645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24331823631230126,0.0,0.0,0.24762451119457274,0.0,0.1585291835501451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719294271172925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930416740263804,0.0,0.0,0.13333780008761556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26974791468811177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20633676195281092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,5VUn7PM8rkL0xw8x,2020/03/31,"I just want to vent Alright, so this is a lot of stuff to read, but I just want to let my thoughts out here. It's all confusing and uncertain, but I'll try to explain things as much as I can unscramble.

​

When I want to be a part of a conversation (for example, one of my teachers had headphones that a bunch of my classmates complimented today. I wanted to compliment it too), I always worry that when I would say something, it would feel out of place with everything else everyone is saying, that a bunch of people would find it unneeded, that the result of my contribution would end up being so humiliating and awkward that I'd regret ever saying it. I'm always worried of what people would think of me if I did something even slightly out of the norm in the moment, of gaining attention, of gaining criticism. In other words, I feel like I'm too sensitive and paranoid of humiliation and being looked down upon. A lot of times I feel like no one really cares about me in a conversation or group in class too when I do get involved.

Sometimes I'd like to talk to someone (whether I talk to them much or not), but I wouldn't know what to say that wouldn't come off as weird too. And a couple of times when someone would talk to me, there was a part of me thinking to myself ""I don't wanna be here anymore, please stop talking to me"". And when someone invites me to do something or offers something: I reject. It might be because I'd prefer not to interact with people or that I don't want to ruin things somehow. But it's always such a stupid habit of mine to say ""No thanks, I'm good."" and then regret it after a few minutes. I want to have more friends, but I also don't, and I know I should have some more. Some people in my classes seemed like they would be good friends, but I never talked to them too much. I didn't really feel like doing it.

I don't feel so many emotions anymore. I don't feel much sympathy or sorrow for anyone, and if it's something bad that happens to me (ex. on a video game I do something bad on accident and I have to reset my save file and start over all that progress I made, or maybe I drop my food on the floor), I only feel a LITTLE more disappointed than if it happened to someone else.  I don't really feel that much excitement anymore either. I'm just neutral most of the time.

There's a lot of things I'd like to do, such as watching a new anime, finishing or starting a drawing, starting to write some kind of story or draw something based on ideas I just had floating in my head, clean my room, do chores, just take care of myself and have things to do. But I never do them. My mind just goes ""ehhh, I'll just do that later"" and what do you know, later never comes. My mom always complains about me not contributing to life, but I just never feel like doing it. I don't like it, but I don't do anything about it.

​

I'm probably just vague, selfish, or stubborn, but I really wanted to say something here.",6.156052796327213,5.372320637729549,6.780429361435728,79.79039362479135,66.32888146911519,9.424060934891486,32.074342654424036,8.567472430010655,2.3525713272120203,2318,80,471,29,32,765,233,599,0.147,0.7040000000000001,0.149,-0.1406,0,0,8,0,0,0,82.0,0,1,4,3,36,37,2,3,21,1,50,3,1,2,7,124,93,50,0,25,36,2,9,8,2,11,1,6,3,0,35,20,1,2,21,3,0,2,20,16,0,2,7,17,63,21,80,68,23,51,0,6,2,0,30,22,0,24,34,353,98,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04321332255962775,0.17985225640321065,0.11709800698310252,0.13132159701487814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16077037729612606,0.03778388588774447,0.0,0.04446779857276481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023717798298668,0.032940417959028925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101885263762044,0.0,0.0,0.0930960806136972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05979084792238995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902818614357871,0.06078428596490591,0.04786069111635394,0.0,0.0,0.03569089019738162,0.04887950722054429,0.0,0.05163461326378741,0.04856491865886127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24590431105874824,0.15441600709400966,0.0,0.0,0.04938878552936109,0.0,0.06534168410264328,0.0,0.08349761384948233,0.0,0.02823207161842868,0.0,0.0,0.09064724545651508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556937774020767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05545749159219483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06100112950509034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05627115909819296,0.08909186950890073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05525643375390516,0.0381678898128289,0.21119776067380616,0.0541592113531382,0.0,0.0,0.04537742127185638,0.0,0.0,0.13782082574060764,0.0,0.051131060564575295,0.0,0.054784977203397166,0.05428737075148071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05732465549813012,0.05456190667047092,0.06328741274103432,0.0,0.0,0.19861684770292015,0.0,0.16670648209161426,0.052189214784030734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323366003570883,0.041097528975388035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703348347143044,0.0,0.1498496452814959,0.0,0.056457102645164736,0.05931633473009526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05826096239432989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054051564620128924,0.0,0.13846979356759528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25783406838060635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04919320201626677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18314130055782354,0.3328022203135374,0.05344391682133786,0.0,0.11474287586823127,0.0,0.0,0.045177302671570274,0.0,0.0,0.06185936974253785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040629054994829536,0.21716423329822707,0.0,0.049749955600952314,0.0,0.0,0.1435989711914174,0.06924938033831922,0.0,0.042899295531402405,0.09452812535029574,0.0,0.05122070212689158,0.0,0.0,0.036687536170860895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22310671683879246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975427412894832,0.0,0.2687040497049582,0.0,0.13132159701487814,0.0
mentalhealth,zeneslev,2020/03/31,"Boston area: Looking for advice on what to try next TLDR: I have not been happy in many years. I want to try therapies beyond my regularly scheduled talk therapy with my psychologist. I am not a fan of SSRIs. Can anyone make a recommendation in the Boston area for an alternative therapy to help me change how I think and perceive myself?

​

Hi everyone. I am a 31yo male engineer living outside the Boston area. I've suffered with depression for the last 10 years or so once I got out of school as things became unstructured for me. I've always had self-confidence issues and have hard times making friends and developing relationships. I am not close with my family as I have lived far away from them for more than a decade. In some sense I want to be far from them as I feel more independent that way. In my mid 20's after living in somewhat a social isolation I started to have physical symptoms that I think were directly related to my loneliness (depression symptoms, panic attacks). Around the same time I luckily found myself with what I though was my dream job and I ended up moving to the Boston area where I've been for the last 5 or so years.

Since moving, my next goal was to find myself in an intimate relationship. I tried a lot of things over the years (social sports, dancing, group exercise, meetups, online dating) but I was only able to find a few dates and I was not able to establish any real attraction. A lot of this has to do with poor social skills and what I think is a lack of emotional intelligence. I was very lucky this last month to have met a girl at an event who I ended up clicking with. I am having some problems though gauging the relationship and I am starting to doubt if I am healthy enough to be in a relationship. Recently I have not been able to be present with her and I am not able to enjoy myself. My friend/family are telling me that if I am not enjoying myself when around her then I should consider breaking up with her. I need to talk to her about how I am feeling but I also need someone else (a professional) to talk to.

I suffer from a lack of interest and confidence in social situations. I have also come to the realization that I no longer enjoy recreational time as it has stopped bringing me pleasure. I have been burned out at work for probably the last 6 months and I have not really taken a vacation (traveling is stressful and not really relaxing for me). My attention span and motivation have shrunk noticeably. I cannot enjoy media (movies or books) because my mind just wanders away towards thoughts of sadness and regret.

I am trying to get more serious with meditation but have not hit the point where I see improvement and the habit becomes established. I'd like to believe that my lack of awareness and attention can be improved by this practice.

Since moving to Boston I've been seeing a therapist regularly (weekly in the past few years) regarding topics of anxiety and depression. It's basically talk therapy. I have made some progress over the years with getting over anxieties and fears. I feel though that there might be better therapies out there for me. I think that the way I think needs to be changed.

My family believes that since I have not been happy for so long there must be a chemical imbalance and therefore I need to go on antidepressants. I have been on an SSRI before (Zoloft) for about 6 months. I do remember feeling very dull and having almost no pleasure in anything. I really don't want to have that experience again. I'd like to believe that there's treatment out there that does not involve SSRIs but I just haven't found it yet. 

Can anyone recommend a clinic in the Boston area? I really don't know what I am looking for..

Many thanks :)",5.197208961701204,6.759389401974616,6.054439351198872,75.9400120700879,68.94358251057828,9.628740371053489,30.136731040468696,9.943994293440598,3.1109841380058585,2982,117,532,74,52,981,301,709,0.133,0.75,0.11599999999999999,-0.8908,1,1,0,0,0,0,70.0,0,0,2,6,27,32,1,4,37,0,66,5,0,8,1,115,105,44,0,16,23,0,5,2,1,3,5,0,0,2,24,37,0,1,20,7,1,8,18,15,0,0,21,10,80,17,103,73,16,93,0,8,5,0,28,45,0,15,39,391,104,7,0.21436504735097625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236876082588734,0.0,0.0,0.05366390748876694,0.0,0.0,0.08571382545930861,0.044592222955479016,0.058066109811002985,0.06511924898877695,0.03644389577233975,0.0,0.08199433724028013,0.0,0.0,0.07494451267170653,0.0,0.04410104222102297,0.09541517008580526,0.0,0.06096779702619055,0.10070150922604644,0.0,0.0,0.032668735800180065,0.05918733824818274,0.04560221664097621,0.1811370007334961,0.0,0.047397116047785466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133848981532023,0.046164126778596534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847422587841118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04689807437935034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04476862258491425,0.06028295638081951,0.09493190251799012,0.055374099325680964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05120874728903628,0.0,0.052422537434215384,0.1515632164813876,0.06030506882513245,0.1083894088896492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796288486425862,0.0,0.0,0.1175201049527827,0.08280895191393642,0.0,0.05599844482491794,0.0,0.030457149113503636,0.0,0.042861827746582336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409778950348633,0.04800724421003205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03592109315452325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05593535391166298,0.05318105810660343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02945235597344757,0.17473612451278708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236396706945146,0.0,0.14196619812047928,0.04742658030774217,0.09000632527902802,0.0,0.0,0.09112274874558186,0.0,0.05070934773337524,0.07154516683932463,0.10866625604464136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05685185985296344,0.054111897304664425,0.0,0.12832810172527728,0.17087709036024182,0.0,0.1589489664010966,0.0,0.0,0.11398982988810145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06101400680276345,0.0,0.05707294482762028,0.0,0.04075856954235126,0.0,0.06287779888417905,0.0,0.0,0.051158923401801316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050661064663317976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057780444385736575,0.051279599920718295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060998588591699536,0.13732773846378354,0.0,0.0529149057667709,0.2301478369754993,0.06070845267002532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05423721808071704,0.08541059440124353,0.0,0.055907373916682594,0.0,0.0,0.13299373676700316,0.06023882369147484,0.0,0.21851817014735056,0.04540770224490258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586434192293229,0.0,0.0,0.044804694554209816,0.06138860936916257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140368155417237,0.0,0.17229850505704006,0.04684112497667031,0.049339633687092176,0.30643139218120696,0.062223585539766126,0.07120730612563818,0.17169558332658044,0.1579594279736556,0.04254547569713185,0.0937484872413001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553979586004465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843680709422902,0.0948285442008524,0.08507649835778164,0.042987677671156264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03901507688672564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511924898877695,0.2070660933898159
mentalhealth,icecreamMilkshakes,2020/03/31,"Please help. I have been caring for my younger sister for over 6 months, and when I say ""i have been"" I really mean my boyfriend has been supporting me and my mentally/emotionally disabled sister.

Back story;
My boyfriend and I started dating about 3 and a half years ago, when we met I was an erotic dancer. As our relationship developed (about  year in) we agreed that I would stay home and do the ""house wife thang"". Things have been going pretty well with some ups and downs. About 7 or 8 months ago my sister started staying with us because she was living homeless and had run out of family members willing to deal with her. (She can become very verbally violent)

I also have to add that this is not the first time I have taken care of her, (as children I was always the mom) I also messed up an arguments with a previous sugar daddy so I could care for her. Helping her at that time got me kicked out of a very nice down town apartment.  That was about a year or two before my current arrangement, so about 5 years ago to date.


I got her on meds (for the first time), going to group 3 times a week, lots of organization trying to help her with getting disability and finding her own apartment .

Today;
Now we are going throw this covid-19 pandemic 

I am once again putting my life (life style) on the line for her and I just fell like she is so ungrateful. She never helps around the house, unless I have to give her step by step instructions and have to show her how to do everything,  which means I'm doing all my house chores two times. Daddy and I NEVER get alone time which means I'm not getting any or very little (3 or 4 times in the past 7 months). Even when I try to get her to go for a walk or ""DO ANYTHING BY YOURSELF"" to get some alone time, she just does not get the hint. I had to flat out tell her ""we cant have sex because you never leave the house!"" She still has not given us any space. 

I also suffer from M.H and  I am having a hard time chasing away my dark thoughts when I feel like I am doing all I can to make her life easier but it feels like she is doing all she can to make my life harder.",5.567344236760122,5.111580282710285,5.894439252336451,84.56547507788164,67.43457943925233,8.909034267912773,27.646417445482864,8.212053250817874,1.54149968847352,1643,42,353,19,24,527,209,428,0.027000000000000003,0.8859999999999999,0.086,0.9449,1,2,0,0,0,0,51.0,7,1,0,2,25,12,1,0,18,0,41,6,0,3,6,60,73,32,0,2,13,5,3,3,0,2,4,1,2,1,10,26,1,0,7,1,0,11,8,3,1,5,16,5,65,9,55,54,7,73,0,1,0,1,46,20,0,8,43,245,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18388670817613614,0.0,0.0,0.14323304051260213,0.0,0.16589299887513326,0.05753671244945849,0.0,0.0,0.0940460830438823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056902948918375336,0.06155641993923755,0.0,0.0,0.06496686412505498,0.05317057805063294,0.0,0.08430401237000179,0.07636858258523085,0.058839892968542265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115031198649138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055209086993080615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128859771193741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060511919818216874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778224311332052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04567163131382953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621458038033569,0.0,0.06518662243945647,0.0,0.06992665804166047,0.09879875377090873,0.0,0.0,0.06320006005062491,0.11763458284107944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167619959690049,0.06633310522752199,0.15719370907555275,0.0,0.11060801613660383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06194306590997518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853939068940784,0.0,0.06936112673026099,0.0,0.0,0.3191502379406851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321779505200096,0.0,0.0,0.19536523543324524,0.10134672538065592,0.06930450654183358,0.06105899024108673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05878719476951536,0.0,0.0,0.09231371344040533,0.0,0.0,0.22596747607092815,0.07680788925034679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809853541206077,0.16557992848941208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999370453371942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736404107610679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660096328440977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590378821314346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07034842053862476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951288365061556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04429800801371754,0.0,0.0,0.07423912197730614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054989300472756034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097886683755263,0.14740523022725616,0.05522171774731163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846838158145078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060438438812135585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045938888278140966,0.0,0.0,0.05489582350840224,0.36288702797075895,0.0,0.06554426102116376,0.0,0.0,0.093893966585976,0.0,0.13509518395923714,0.0,0.16635316738209605,0.0,0.0,0.17116313571569816,0.0,0.0,0.05546639043998194,0.0,0.06217239645024785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04912078693626218,0.0,0.0,0.17811629448326932
mentalhealth,BlackScorpionVoid,2020/03/31,"Some type of Alter? Confusing rant. I am unsure how to word all this. This is something new to me, but not new at all.I do not know if I have an alter or some kind of split mind. But I have a persona I made for a specific person a long time ago. Nothing much different from myself. Just the opposite gender.It went on for so long. Ten years or more. I think he, Alex, might have formed into a separate person in my mind. And he is in so much pain.It is sort of like a switch when it comes to the heartache he feels. Cause it is not like what I read with people with multi personalities. There is not black out times, no switching people. There is disassociation but I am unsure if it is connected or not.But I have hard a hard time making decisions, some times the things I say contradict things I have told someone recently and I do not understand why I said them.

But the person Alex was created for, who Alex fell in love with, who gave us the deepest feeling of love I have ever felt to this day.. is now toxic. Not purposefully.   But we came out and told her everything after 10 plus years of lying. Hoping maybe all the ""love"" she had, that what I am wouldn't affect anything.Well Alex is heartbroken. And it has been  plus years since we told her.And I cannot handle how destructive he is. The is polluting my body with dark, suicidal thoughts. It seems anything that brings her up I spiral. I cut. He hurts so bad.

​

Recently I blocked her, deleted her number. Everything that I could contact her with.

I want to make her a fantasy, a dream. Something that didnt happen and maybe Alex will disappear.

​

What is happening ?  


Edit: I am sorry this is all over. I cannot keep my mind straight when I try  to write about it. ",1.3948478260869557,3.879157611594202,2.788822463768117,90.43019021739131,84.47826086956522,6.232608695652174,20.79891304347826,7.554174236665415,0.8287521739130432,1356,42,281,24,40,439,177,345,0.145,0.753,0.102,-0.9382,1,0,2,0,0,0,59.0,3,0,1,0,13,12,2,1,16,0,36,4,1,7,4,73,64,24,1,6,17,0,5,2,0,3,0,2,0,4,21,19,0,2,9,3,0,6,11,5,0,1,14,8,39,7,34,46,10,37,0,1,1,3,33,11,0,13,22,191,60,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745098768359032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18933745015342496,0.21233577726442934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719006225009307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295289488063156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970518251699802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09993155810115234,0.0,0.08975624905772736,0.0,0.07526419525320648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976031643289163,0.0,0.0,0.05634842590529045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128630053821657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903397760842552,0.0,0.0,0.15705062968499822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835693647120474,0.0,0.08389188478254042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545275001707889,0.0,0.15653828433152334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678120993765524,0.0,0.0,0.09353471828163984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766123217339375,0.0,0.09098564574516614,0.04801797467726068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537217352013099,0.0,0.0,0.15464490068633774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365729213896798,0.08267454656452028,0.11664445495186446,0.0,0.17555605972187396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268905921264467,0.2646657928000476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12845857404561506,0.0,0.0,0.16877098265461873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383685276179721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297114625376744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114702237454734,0.3051633080498608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873967515386925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725408050513262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311183312562796,0.0694826016935146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795411952313272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227593711087757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403095013906616,0.13452817307269865,0.0,0.09780704009603212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557199797659784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160936199962886,0.05598515908069256,0.0,0.06936448739444416,0.20379184562541705,0.0,0.0,0.2504662444793226,0.0,0.059320604423307735,0.0,0.0,0.09095848590569344,0.10509908991651364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05153492234739114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08099574566788054,0.07884063917190963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21233577726442934,0.16879624906536128
mentalhealth,Alarmed-Confection,2020/03/31,"how to deal with being trapped in a toxic home during quarantine? i normally live on my own in an apartment out of state. i decided to come back home to my parents during the quarantine because there’s greater access to healthcare and i could be with my family should anything happen or anyone need to be taken care of.

now we have travel bans and i cant go back home so its safe to say im stuck here until the quarantine is over. my work is remote so im still working and paying my rent for my apartment even though im not there.

i moved out at 17 because i was literally going to kill myself if i had to stay here. my mother has something mentally wrong with her and has absolutely degraded my brother and i for the majority of our lives. nothing is ever good enough for her. she constantly complains about us putting things in common areas and how it’s “her” house not “our” house. we’re basically told every day that we’re useless and worthless and disappointing and a waste of space. she never took us to a counselor as children so my brother and i were diagnosed with autism and adhd (respectively) at ages 20 and 19, and have now had to deal with the consequences of those untreated conditions.

one example is that i had some of my books on the shelf in our office and she yelled at me saying she hated them there and wished she could have the room the way she wanted but couldnt because of us.

she also said she hates the house and would be happy if she could change my room into a room for her hobbies but obviously she cant because of me. she acts like she resents us for existing because its keeping her from her happiness.

every time i say anything she cuts me off or walks away halfway through my sentence.

because of this, i have decided to keep myself in my room for the rest of the quarantine. the downside is that this is probably going to kill me. i am too upset to eat. i haven’t eaten in 18 hours already. aside from that i don’t even want to go down and get food because ill probably be yelled at for dirtying the bowl or plate i use for my food or get yelled at for taking food out of the fridge and dirtying the kitchen. it’s too hostile of an environment & i don’t see myself even being able to eat because of being so upset, should i overcome going down there to make it.

needless to say i know this is not healthy, and i should just suck it up but im honestly tired of hearing about how im a horrible good for nothing just for going to make lunch or putting my stuff out. my only option ive come up with is to just change my sleep schedule so im up at night and eat at night when she’s asleep and do all of my tasks through the night.

if anyone has any advice id really appreciate it, yesterday i felt like i was going to just commit myself cause i couldnt take it anymore. im probably going to take up smoking again while im here unfortunately. i dont see myself lasting 30 more days... and some people are saying the quarantine is going to be 90+ more days... im not going to make it that long like this...",4.784339058999255,5.166410368932041,5.788705501618125,81.78416355489172,69.09708737864078,8.66855862584018,29.438386855862586,8.617729084823388,2.0877293502613887,2400,84,487,36,39,796,261,618,0.12300000000000001,0.816,0.061,-0.9884,2,6,1,0,0,3,44.0,8,0,1,2,36,27,8,2,23,0,49,14,2,8,5,93,92,47,2,17,19,4,1,3,0,4,3,10,9,1,21,36,9,4,4,2,2,19,13,16,0,1,13,13,81,11,92,62,10,85,0,3,2,0,45,37,1,11,29,348,102,4,0.051260549130115636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06160521862000976,0.050091215342648036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656729063938525,0.04099304261942717,0.0,0.05554078356604907,0.0,0.03485893120760813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05083669061663139,0.07168513563781956,0.0,0.0843661285044754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816097330183562,0.07883239631238806,0.0,0.2499836397320241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0522635461746653,0.05265870432474982,0.1084537281468133,0.08831284831276326,0.0,0.055394442965950516,0.0,0.12278213211465633,0.0,0.0,0.09917644052850398,0.10569475061998038,0.0,0.05202837834098502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060076981811846515,0.0,0.0,0.1573570169106835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052965850059922014,0.0,0.1015713277520656,0.04636810141001179,0.0863784469829556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04832388364782946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04921816589247775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18595337844356735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0535630424386852,0.0,0.29132551370462983,0.08598983314012057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04532953430519802,0.10913561547009204,0.0,0.10121835952344757,0.0,0.0,0.0577743643728733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425553092163394,0.0,0.050481315241861766,0.1774433739692544,0.0,0.0,0.4983317047342745,0.0,0.0,0.09112546269361754,0.1134244054605368,0.0,0.028171457222738113,0.041784189195398384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512994510387422,0.0,0.0905280080373752,0.045363972904742686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265044376711867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05165857691333008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05448185136439093,0.0,0.03800904765992117,0.0395352956017598,0.0,0.0,0.14431365862135062,0.05022445450240125,0.09837175879000233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03473547472400503,0.03898595750226287,0.0,0.0,0.056918773531996224,0.0,0.0,0.03553761046176381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658026256498187,0.0,0.0,0.10306202026887716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03283882037412938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048760520770376375,0.20382223058028653,0.0,0.0,0.08169604186206685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051297568885650895,0.0,0.0,0.03946287508420629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05463692493961675,0.04093674075126105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586810647750526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562466047538593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034055231103979115,0.0,0.05036322925631505,0.0,0.0298904384241868,0.05891646049366586,0.0,0.04898165141639852,0.05695235620376569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466405162343409,0.044272656071162715,0.0,0.0,0.060469599983948435,0.04068823791732209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0589471017143926,0.0,0.0,0.07463658055383555,0.0,0.0,0.03641402336502996,0.056045363457966686,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kivimio,2020/03/31,"Someone try to diagnose me. Okay so. There was this girl who liked me for 4 months. One night we kissed and couple days after we made out and i said that maybe we could be a couple but ”unofficially” so we would tell anyone.
After 1 week after she broke up with me saying ”our friendship is too important and what if we break up”
And now this is the part im worried about. I wasnt shocked, i wasnt sad, i wasnt happy, i wasnt angry. I dont feel anything. Its like nothing is changed. I have noticed that i usually dont feel anything when most people would. If i see someone wounded. I feel nothing. When someone close dies i never cry or feel sad. Its hard to explain but i mean i feel sad but i dont show it anyway or try to hide it. 

couple weeks ago i looked at this article about psychopaths and ”how to spot one” and i hit all the boxes, except enjoying seeing someone in pain. 

I dont feel fine, feeling fine. I want to feel something but just cant.",0.559963453631795,2.7339190050251285,2.465365463682048,93.49808474189129,85.08040201005025,4.824211968935587,21.105756052992234,6.1124844417494595,0.13946030150753774,738,24,161,6,22,245,113,199,0.151,0.706,0.14400000000000002,-0.1289,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,6,0,0,0,12,14,0,0,3,1,18,4,0,2,2,43,35,19,1,6,10,0,9,2,0,2,3,2,0,1,11,14,0,0,10,1,0,0,10,6,0,2,7,14,28,8,18,23,3,21,0,4,3,1,13,6,0,5,16,108,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677915662922693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845136395940493,0.0,0.161120614942633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356129694222453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781622237145073,0.3249611570977511,0.10753448052026413,0.06313500994231498,0.0,0.0,0.09936267624657903,0.10160089584487997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4589349031422537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3959944557782762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421242380318052,0.08769584934133673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574479505182732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09565436722313927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822082299382179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09263183905262036,0.0,0.0,0.09834998403152838,0.10663776187829407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813988673545466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550365593647458,0.0,0.0,0.09186903888985798,0.0,0.18786826597587386,0.11145557793063886,0.0,0.0,0.1326741228278382,0.0,0.10416855748456544,0.0,0.0,0.10601214491729072,0.0,0.06786896296761312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312179224899853,0.0778510611123582,0.0,0.0,0.15602134098753906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3317888439989333,0.07536534879201356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556567465029381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293031313224446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781893556966242,0.0,0.0577417697567571,0.0,0.15705300175492606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941843709275268,0.0,0.1390854349040753,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nursejacki3,2020/03/31,"What are some of the negative side effects from skipping one dose of Lamictal and/or Seroquel? I’ve been taking these two medications since September I think. When I miss a dose of Lamictal in the morning or if I take it late I get nauseous. When I miss my night dose of Seroquel I feel like I’m extremely hungover the entire next day. Missed my Sunday dose and yesterday I was throwing up off and on until about 4 pm. 

My doctor said it was unusual for that to happen after missing one dose of Seroquel. But I’m curious to see if this happens to other people?",3.778020202020201,5.618541690909094,5.16030303030303,79.83489898989899,73.0,8.161616161616159,30.40404040404041,8.841846274778883,2.7020101010101008,446,20,81,9,9,149,76,110,0.109,0.847,0.045,-0.7059,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,4,0,4,7,0,1,0,10,19,9,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,7,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,4,0,3,4,3,10,1,17,15,1,16,0,4,1,0,1,5,0,4,11,55,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15061038526914464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390323812200733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808202296100052,0.16683704095145188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201209906640136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4130274441830545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26343700513162793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409312450664208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352613656274243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24836651196928394,0.21915623921101116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31649794262491965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190336660608634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22214471844368666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18609670211354876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19318209087604207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35117765001471163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963943079208178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22812920080767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LiebeMich,2020/03/31,"Feeling real all of a sudden Anyone ever experienced feeling so out of it, then light shifts and you feel exactly how you felt from years ago. Hard to explain. Like, just a minute ago, I felt unreal, but I didn't know it; then sunlight from my window intensifies and all of a sudden I get this feeling of deja vu and I feel like the person I was from years ago and I realize that I haven't felt like a real person in a long time.",5.1986516853932585,4.669012685393259,6.7317752808988764,78.50283146067417,68.21348314606742,9.367191011235958,27.9123595505618,8.841846274778883,1.9646431460674152,335,9,69,5,5,116,53,89,0.015,0.8320000000000001,0.153,0.8519,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,0,4,3,0,0,6,0,3,0,0,1,4,25,14,9,0,0,2,0,9,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,5,0,0,11,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,11,10,3,10,9,2,14,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,15,46,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43073312890924864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325403980095855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14651223732396326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4094875658930341,0.11571226861953422,0.4665533016841541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462327491239162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509439457733428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901514405091608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373928630344659,0.0,0.0,0.14333942866037674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28285403546993265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687174061924196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444671821685126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20860830451925
mentalhealth,pikapiiiii,2020/03/31,"How do I become more open minded in my relationship (and in general)? My girlfriend and I have many differing opinions about the things we like and some values. I still love her, but my mind keeps focusing and honing in on our differences and the negatives.

Some of it can be very stupid like she doesn't like x tv show and I love it, but some of it is more about core values like how we enjoy spending our money or the importance of social happiness (having friends) and weighing against success in academics or work.

My mind hones in on all of the negativity and really avoids the positivity unless I actively think about it.

How do you overcome the constant waves of negativity?

This applies to more than just my relationship, but my relationship is the one thing I'm worried about it affecting the most.",7.187733333333334,7.74651750666667,7.5086666666666675,70.91433333333336,63.93333333333333,10.933333333333335,34.66666666666667,10.746095033038511,3.8250666666666673,646,27,114,16,9,211,88,150,0.1,0.637,0.264,0.9858,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,4,1,0,2,9,12,1,1,8,0,9,3,0,4,1,35,14,17,0,0,7,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,8,11,1,2,1,2,2,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,18,10,20,13,8,10,0,0,0,2,15,8,0,7,6,93,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666996490524903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631108324651269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153970897122589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661466481711215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606767767469258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13416102124054255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949635916003278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724556714100275,0.0,0.0,0.1530278880808257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4572143919917997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022797936931401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966950300716884,0.0,0.0,0.486154194328676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15386273210332335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053963366779565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20055358616302674,0.09671525813304284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12454002107776325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988498245184694,0.15328531319307998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nplmbb,2020/03/31,"Social media consequences on body dysmorphobia and relationship Hi. I’ve got no idea if someone will ever read this I’ll try to keep it short. 

i suffer from body dysmorphobia and struggle every day, it even makes me cry whenever I see other women with a “better body”. This disorder comes along with anorexia and bulimia, I often starve myself to death just because I can’t accept my body the way it is. I’ve been doing workout until fainting forever but it doesn’t help my poor body, I never loose weight or shape it the way I want it. I feel in competition with other people, always. I’ve been taught like that and I realize how wrong it is. 

I’ve been in a relationship for almost two years now and once, I was scrolling through Twitter I noticed my partner liking other women pics, naked or sexualised (porn). I react with extreme anxiety all the time. My partner is loving and caring, I can’t complain but this social media approval is seriously killing me. I don’t understand why he needs to see other women when he says he loves me and only attracted by me. Our relationship is honestly healthy and we talk about anything all the time, we try not to hurt the loved one. He explained himself saying those body are just body and he wasn’t sexualizing them. He likes art and says nudes are art. I agree though it makes me sick. I can’t help but think I’m not enough to him or he may be fantasizing better or hotter women. It’s killing me I suffer from this, small and insignificant thing that’s a like or a follow on a virtual platform. It makes me cry I can’t help it. I’m hopeless my brain is sick about this, beg anyone to give me any piece of advice. I can’t.",3.1539943402159096,5.1999621124620115,4.579771512420084,82.43428571428575,75.29179331306993,7.212703070956922,25.022639136358872,8.104835398774808,1.585107452049051,1321,45,252,22,29,439,174,329,0.17,0.63,0.2,0.9288,0,0,0,0,0,1,32.0,3,0,1,3,11,23,2,1,10,0,24,17,9,5,4,54,47,24,3,3,13,0,2,4,2,2,3,3,0,6,24,19,1,1,7,4,1,2,12,10,0,2,7,7,38,13,24,37,4,21,0,4,2,5,38,8,0,9,13,159,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831057021911562,0.0,0.0,0.08024729112081297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666817841764796,0.0,0.0,0.05449703628517327,0.0,0.06130585489098218,0.0,0.0,0.056034813785529665,0.0,0.0659472882138239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04885178279003873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175226321600806,0.0,0.623111890339425,0.0,0.08946124704320524,0.0,0.0,0.08170670395226944,0.0,0.0,0.06903235888507746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17605710808188402,0.05168280543778865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918458462593278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280465730287874,0.0,0.05293082855458126,0.07249000521463185,0.06752027667531643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040520513957175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687630415837153,0.0,0.0,0.06409420651804207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16114576190816465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579009207379643,0.09046679165504876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123092239032001,0.17732310561082212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15660680357808546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21698480608105405,0.0,0.16047953178337426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059421800317145536,0.06180787431841606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123839458342667,0.0,0.08534505653847194,0.05430402943632618,0.060949061460304724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05555805584769055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801603457967211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581167865729525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19118843482902625,0.0,0.0,0.12772027149072138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338254178259715,0.06790122582737064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377832649880415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441241861621498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05324056420778757,0.051349616918037404,0.07873582571633374,0.0,0.09345899320212783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088177782291516,0.0,0.07828382537466691,0.08342717040367986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04726785748032216,0.12722067495150904,0.0,0.097587297348926,0.0,0.0,0.07231267510047938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761904338931416,0.0,0.051606669035360535
mentalhealth,auruner,2020/03/31,"I (M/30) Have Bipolar Disorder and an Inferiority Complex I was diagnosed 2 years ago for bipolar depressive and have been on medication for 1 year. It's helped out at times. There are moments where I am genuinely at peace and overall, I can say that I'm less depressed. The Inferiority complex I have not been diagnosed formally. It's something that I think I have. It's related to a few things:

1) I have stopped communicating with girls who were clearly interested at the potential of what ""this"" could be. The thoughts I have are, ""she's not really interested"" when texts aren't returned or whatever. One girl in particular chatted with me for about 2 hours. I got her number the same night. The vibes felt good. But my mind just jumped to ""she's not interested"" because honestly I am under the impression that if a girl takes more than a few days to get back to you, she's not into it. I stopped because I wanted to leave gracefully.

2) I feel like I'm not as cool as other men. I have a pervasive sense that I don't belong in any social group. I don't really go out much anymore. I just isolate but was taking steps to get back out there before beerflu happened.

3) When I achieve something, I feel relieved. Not happy. At work, I constantly feel like I can't do some of the more challenging assignments but my work is, for the most part, well done. I feel like I'm not intelligent - just average. 

4) When a friend doesn't text me back for weeks or generally ignores me/bails out on plans, I feel like I'm less than. Like I don't really have much value as a friend. It's happened in the last few weeks from multiple parties, and I confront them. But I still feel like they'll ditch me in a heartbeat. For voicing my opinions and all.

These are the areas of my life where I struggle. I realize that in order for me to be truly happy with myself, I'll need to change the way I see myself. I don't really know how to do this with the quarantine in place. I'm not depressed right now - at least I don't think so. I'm just trying to improve myself.

TL;DR: I suspect that I have an Inferiority Complex and it's affecting multiple areas of my life. Want to improve myself so I can live a better life.",2.471874373538256,4.5999821780821994,4.336615436017372,82.99867858336118,77.67579908675799,7.652166165497272,26.43635148680254,8.556025622055003,2.0058429001002342,1726,69,346,37,41,585,202,438,0.10400000000000001,0.725,0.171,0.9861,0,1,3,0,0,0,61.0,0,1,2,6,21,31,1,1,22,1,37,8,0,2,2,67,66,22,0,5,19,0,7,6,2,1,8,2,0,4,19,15,0,3,16,1,0,3,16,9,1,1,9,11,55,22,52,53,15,53,0,6,1,0,19,25,0,6,29,241,74,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095003405267114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062101010729093485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056530880459124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106592766731448,0.0,0.11133614941203383,0.0,0.07770694336803323,0.0,0.0,0.0807654821152685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09660488577724202,0.0,0.0,0.0986849217055124,0.0,0.07291191706731652,0.0,0.0,0.05889411009814807,0.0,0.2359624075509762,0.18537658899109685,0.0,0.0,0.10466110219511092,0.0,0.0,0.0934524858293751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770460608722154,0.3261965979532298,0.08768191514397229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110784542346955,0.0,0.09542229087166318,0.0,0.05189949383267755,0.07659522775704171,0.0730372746477696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150867503462207,0.19442455039342116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061210146284166024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993220936072166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05018730943941351,0.0744383230247625,0.0,0.0966951292158181,0.0,0.0,0.19350692005010167,0.2676872391287544,0.0,0.08063759564127852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199570630101,0.0,0.0,0.09220758219924052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13426201852753533,0.0677129273549334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08569801914870744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061881073624104485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889110558791844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541039253495093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340087737330846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798713169969172,0.0,0.07262165585462108,0.0,0.0,0.07277054396741499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308965837237708,0.0,0.14060582720736414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292859788120329,0.15269590466431662,0.0,0.09546792096257924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732316763558858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066922303425028,0.11702886353214255,0.0,0.07249820544013548,0.053249665809392416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062000564378976976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772628842296744,0.07248589133163226,0.14650345006756654,0.0,0.08210801628407535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296469309836384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761470075867678
mentalhealth,sbee823,2020/03/31,"How to support someone with severe depression and anxiety? Hi all, I'm not sure if this is the right place to post this but I'm in a bit of a bind. 

I have a friend (17M) who I've known for a year, but have never met in person due to us being long distance. He has frequent depressive episodes (apathy, self loathing) and severe anxiety attacks. I do relate to him quite a bit, as I have BPD myself, but my attacks are nowhere near as long or often as his. He has one maybe every three days, (I am aware of them as he talks about them/ghosts me for a half day or so) and is on medication for them, I believe. 

But my question is, how do I support someone in this situation? I don't have friends with the same symptoms as his, and I just feel really helpless. I really care about him, and I feel like the only thing I can do is offer to talk. This situation is doubly hard because of the distance, and I can't give him a hug or sit with him or anything. 

I don't know if there really is an answer to this..but I'm also writing this partially to vent myself. Any advice/encouraging comments is greatly appreciated :,)",4.478646616541353,4.560818543859654,6.080726817042606,80.4734210526316,69.70175438596492,8.970426065162908,30.32080200501253,8.841846274778883,2.2749012531328323,860,32,180,14,14,296,125,228,0.153,0.7509999999999999,0.096,-0.8631,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,1,0,2,1,9,14,2,0,12,0,23,3,0,2,3,35,34,25,0,2,12,0,3,1,2,0,2,0,0,2,7,9,0,0,6,0,0,0,5,5,0,3,1,3,27,9,28,32,4,17,0,3,0,1,26,7,0,8,9,127,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323642597125764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928472617046094,0.0,0.1783810001058696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09594306487341983,0.0,0.0,0.26527433415099044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107175886004684,0.0,0.0,0.13135622302115738,0.0,0.0,0.25457065180673355,0.0,0.1468401496396933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887056784607318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15038091449281665,0.0,0.2008363970200494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823151885073568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790211256882653,0.08329142357852662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18015321737206813,0.0,0.0,0.11184308615057334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854012157943845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444111779838054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407443356267213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05695964581058222,0.0,0.0,0.20635573410648592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712962865237847,0.0,0.0,0.11745146008576395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992086037249544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900393117310017,0.08867142100976162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180128503350654,0.12181101011301038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116603269896462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060670555608836,0.12400707830621276,0.0,0.0,0.2240702847959564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956663038228122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216280734525098,0.26342546014877105,0.0,0.0,0.2621025299295345,0.0,0.0,0.19757148143582196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646083258490057,0.10988404122813954,0.12118093029323687,0.0,0.18742013584885966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745675438727871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14024257998415704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750796906023925
mentalhealth,yoppaboyj,2020/03/31,"Health anxiety took over my life 

Hello. I’ve suffered from health anxiety my whole life but it’s been at full force since 2019. Also have depression because of this. Does anyone have health anxiety/hypochondria? I’ve had times it was so bad I was shaking crying and screaming in my bed because I convinced myself I had a terrible disease. For weeks I was depressed and anxious I caught syphilis from protected sex (yes protected) among other things 

A Hernia from coughing , a torn tricep tendon (I weightlift so losing that would be very important to me and need surgery), multiple sclerosis, melanoma (deadliest skin cancer) a torn pectoral tendon ,  and now afraid of a brain tumor or lymphoma cancer. Every time I get over one thing something new pops up and takes the happiness out of me for 2 weeks at a time. And it feels soooo real . If you can go to my profile I recently posted a picture of my eyelid/eyebrow area. Im pretty sure I woke up 3 days ago and they got thicker/puffed up but not swollen, and I’m gonna assume I have a tumor behind my eyes. Especially the fact I seen an article about a girl who had a droopy eyelid and it ended up as a brain tumor. And even worse , if I did I wouldn’t be able to get medical help because of the pandemic! Perfect . And this morning I noticed the skin on my nose is peeling and cracked , accompanied by the unusual rashes I’ve been having for weeks has me thinking I’ve got some type of blood cancer or systemic disease and again, can’t get medical help so it’ll be too late and I’ll die by the time this is over . Also I know this is not healthy but anytime I catch myself laughing or having fun I’ll immediately stop and tell myself I don’t deserve happiness, my life is terrible and that’s what it’ll be forever",3.408082851637765,5.442123315028901,4.561757225433529,82.89918689788057,74.52023121387282,7.387899807321773,28.87437379576108,8.238735603445708,2.178026512524085,1401,60,261,24,30,459,191,346,0.22699999999999998,0.653,0.12,-0.9918,0,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,1,2,10,17,0,2,18,1,30,26,11,0,3,40,47,30,1,5,10,0,4,0,0,5,14,1,1,1,17,17,0,3,4,1,0,5,5,10,0,1,15,8,33,7,33,23,3,38,0,4,2,2,8,15,0,7,16,168,50,1,0.10526850198758572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331417547403653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683663660140201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16106023177588502,0.1189234437581622,0.0,0.07360618420430426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789480209136855,0.19251210523416554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350289252039741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11563250640531925,0.06788947513610677,0.0,0.18133521302092115,0.0,0.1092520853100263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212117548125273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932366474142439,0.0,0.0,0.06952885275191299,0.0,0.08869325311780285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053226917569504206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16499534247396244,0.0,0.05982651559312524,0.0,0.16838567500028073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241205556512511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335686485107181,0.0,0.0,0.14111851583498225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370804631222822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578528156832155,0.0,0.11874745541520157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22306276833986968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776852708412774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120938818887898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805526037144941,0.0,0.10166897518916583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198488872277997,0.0,0.0,0.07133266131703278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008181260024888,0.10709591123097477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981860146989125,0.0,0.0,0.10393994602603514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707919265881486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104083578373178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800918127311537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921431732175108,0.0,0.07914881266794853,0.0,0.09200931063419306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13987143032967458,0.06745180551783275,0.0,0.0,0.24553164022331794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695717903871533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868575387491424,0.0,0.0,0.253320127788857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11752852311420517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727759686507528,0.07477972351110866,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dorillaz,2020/03/31,"I'm not seeing my therapist, and im afraid my ED will come back I havent seen my therapist in 2 weeks now, and i feel very bad now days. I feel like trash everyday, i want to skip working out, and just cry. I feel like nothing. I feel disgusting. Everything was better after 8-9 months after therapy, but now Im falling really down. I had confidence, and my bulimia just disappeared. Also, I can't see my boyfriend because of coronavirus, and im just depressed because of that. (Im 19 btw.) He also struggles in this situation, because he has a bad ocd.
I dont know what to do, what can i do.",1.7586512667660197,3.5568339262295083,4.307585692995531,83.93346497764533,78.59016393442623,8.370789865871833,27.484351713859912,9.095868883498916,2.4357934426229515,457,20,96,12,11,161,75,122,0.17600000000000002,0.716,0.10800000000000001,-0.8821,0,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,9,9,1,2,1,0,10,0,0,0,0,18,21,8,0,1,5,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,5,0,0,3,4,6,0,0,3,7,15,3,10,17,0,17,0,1,3,0,2,4,0,0,12,56,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211518788968587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169123791500252,0.22084460851820925,0.2418530988400205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696340156688685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392071393006074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14526920250935876,0.08528959734930988,0.0,0.11390578048216606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499472136897913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885678041657112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674760621463987,0.1889572756921275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5714060075381974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726805347257874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12922026103454565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055598071921875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689638264439473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472202931090787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21077049584509272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486533003029003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13825526058725798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123813837219874,0.3071023230646221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911918956236696,0.07800382540986411,0.0,0.10608208737447572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962787714861033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StrugggLifeee,2020/03/31,"My mental health is in a rapid decline and I don’t know what to do. I’m going to try to keep this short.

I’m quarantined with my ex who I feel is psychologically torturing me. She is was able to freely move on after dumping me and appears to have never been effected by our breakup. I feel like our entire relationship was fake and that she never loved me to begin with and I am absolutely devastated.

I’m able to work, but my schedule got changed so now my days off line up with my ex’s days off. I told my boss that I can’t do that, explained what was going on at home, and begged her to not change my schedule. Her response? “Ask your ex to leave the house on your days off”

I’m trying to keep my shit together, but I’m breaking. I’m actively looking for other work and have a plan to move out in a month to another city.

I’ve been working out, meditating, staying far away from my ex as I possibly can, but I still feel so broken and dead inside. I feel disrespected by my ex and by my boss. I just feel so fucking broken and worthless and unlovable and like nothing will ever get better.

My life is a sick fucking joke and I honestly can’t handle being alive right now. I don’t want to hurt myself or anything, but I can’t fucking take this anymore.",3.599645299145301,4.3812055884615395,5.156410256410258,83.82081196581198,71.96153846153847,7.931623931623932,27.905982905982903,8.167268648758528,1.6994188034188031,983,35,209,14,18,333,135,260,0.196,0.713,0.091,-0.9878,0,1,0,0,0,2,23.0,2,2,0,6,8,16,6,0,5,0,22,8,1,3,3,41,52,21,1,1,7,5,5,2,0,1,3,0,1,0,9,17,0,2,8,1,0,5,8,10,0,0,7,6,37,6,36,43,0,37,0,2,1,4,19,16,4,2,16,137,46,5,0.2370268269921049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427164742549195,0.0,0.0,0.11753346068390305,0.0,0.0,0.09752644130998832,0.0,0.1107940434839674,0.0,0.11134725320255093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481548334686573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25074295432197125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292940420046322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720216752815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996197139662377,0.08466600628167957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3286912232321926,0.061918367090931965,0.0,0.13470780806498478,0.0,0.09478600317915407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597421660924252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188786167296336,0.0,0.0,0.13674856725896253,0.12687106030024373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106803345554296,0.0,0.0,0.06513187266390846,0.0,0.0,0.1254885929062954,0.0,0.0,0.08370952881028842,0.1157993349808539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995214189707786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069629827527777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943364615168152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459627596863142,0.2519220058446521,0.0,0.0,0.1828097012166929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137168165738998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360606674920747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723905368789687,0.0,0.1012098075793389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165231587018345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12631953007536914,0.09464496510796466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910733777274027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324464537623742,0.0,0.16092565667808706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990228185663608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588375295392057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Chopstick_Theory,2020/03/31,"Ummmmmmmmm So as a person who is a sociopath, is it even possible for someone like me to have a wife and a twerp child??? Although I myself is truly incapable of love emotions??? Is that truly realistic???",2.9036842105263148,5.532547000000001,6.746578947368422,63.61355263157896,79.0,8.010526315789475,30.552631578947373,8.841846274778883,3.243400000000001,158,8,26,4,4,60,31,38,0.059000000000000004,0.635,0.305,0.897,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,1,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4793798746712943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814789085390585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208203391788465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3846318428101768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721120897219938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.480438618499844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3610894341970049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Selefer,2020/03/31,"Communication Issues on My Part Hurting Relationship Hey,

So basically I suck at communication. My gf always has to force any issue or feeling out of me, and my personal insecurities end up being not only the cause of these insecurities, but also creating these communications problems. I end up creating this cyclical problem that keeps feeding itself and everything I try to do to fix it doesn't work. I'm not sure what to do, I'm thinking about using betterhelp or something like that during quarantine but I have no clue what to do.

Any advice or stories or whatever is appreciated.",7.4220000000000015,8.8820352,9.140000000000004,56.25000000000003,63.66666666666666,11.714285714285715,37.85714285714286,11.491704259439757,5.1507142857142885,476,24,71,15,7,168,75,105,0.168,0.711,0.122,-0.5472,0,1,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,3,8,1,2,1,0,8,1,0,2,1,19,15,10,0,2,8,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,9,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,0,1,8,2,13,14,1,7,0,1,0,0,4,5,1,4,3,53,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884708593718173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423850106050435,0.16048373971767368,0.0,0.0,0.2623171618632024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19813117309298195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34165210265053125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17333960488069924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752114007506374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20647190198583054,0.0,0.0,0.40261346859238906,0.0,0.17143219771210147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422680351850618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14668673665876758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20885999959404927,0.0,0.0,0.16840711606042924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36910211786119695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070707800474401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14848116440230602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177820130861344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235836541845757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309464362243514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16657822093808744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041205011029806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,milicojka,2020/03/31,Therapy for anxious attachment I have found out recently that all of my sleepless nights and uncontrollable reactions and sobbing were the result of a developed anxious attachment. What type of therapy would you suggest for dealing with it? Thank you all for reading!,7.727045454545458,11.042331250000005,7.204545454545452,63.00181818181821,66.04545454545455,11.672727272727276,45.09090909090909,11.20814326018867,6.823063636363638,221,15,28,8,4,69,34,44,0.183,0.682,0.135,-0.3595,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,3,0,0,1,2,9,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,8,2,2,3,0,1,0,0,4,1,1,0,2,24,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5510867285373029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514554720769582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26742937824350016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22888843544215895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439711272891401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24082688412687414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22455506766272132,0.5578535296117086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17326320146961136,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RobSka17,2020/03/31,"Maybe I'm tired of being ""stronger than you think,"" of ""pulling through."" Maybe, just for once, I don't want to have to keep winning the battle. I don't know. I've kinda been feeling particularly shitty lately and today I was informed that the project I was starting on with my employer's client company has been postponed, so I'm going onto the bench and I won't be getting the full salary anymore, so it was pretty much a follow up kick in the balls. I just feel like garbage all round. Fuck everything.",3.0527272727272714,5.207024575757579,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727276,75.96969696969697,6.016161616161617,27.161616161616163,6.937597516519254,1.2658161616161614,399,16,78,4,9,126,74,99,0.154,0.718,0.128,-0.4078,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,1,4,4,2,0,6,0,12,2,0,0,1,14,25,4,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,5,1,0,3,3,2,0,0,5,3,8,2,12,17,3,11,0,0,1,1,2,5,1,1,4,49,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363690322416427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21420443897718724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410235227266367,0.17026999674915788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203412993759078,0.12452270546706368,0.0,0.135453997706009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21184736032380186,0.0,0.0,0.1309853178837132,0.0,0.2688576694453764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644078454076748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4788887170614342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520717261968966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25382410247740833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424772556179149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869813321169766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15271851651892934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27393653247433913,0.22591825676015026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14057898591425125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,e_bra1,2020/03/31,"Need help regarding partners TS & lockdown 

II’m looking for advice on how to best help my partner. I’ve been doing lots of reading but there is absolutely no information out there on adults with Tourettes. He really really struggled with it as a young child and a teenager, but gradually got better going into adulthood. He struggles with alcohol and substance abuse and uses it as a way to escape, but it’s a vicious cycle as the next day when he wakes up he feels awful for the things he done drunk. Tics aren’t exactly his main problem, it’s all the underlying conditions that come with the condition: OCD, depression, anxiety etc etc. I’m really REALLY worried about him with the lockdown conditions, he feels trapped and has started ticking again and his mood is constantly up and down. He’s hyper and looks visibly okay but is actually extremely restless and angry. He’s worried about receding into himself like he did when he was younger, and I am worried about that too. He’s just started a new job, we are moving into our first flat & we are due a baby in August. I really want to help him but I have to admit I really struggle with him using alcohol as a coping mechanism. On the very few scientific studies done on adults with TS I have found that being part of a group and having a project is a really good thing. So in the meantime I’ve got him to join a Facebook group for adults with Tourette’s because there isn’t much we can do with the lockdown. He really likes various types of martial arts so when this is over I’m going to encourage him to join Thai boxing when this is all over. But WHAT else can I do? Please help.",6.835786163522009,6.7834522012578615,7.4415094339622625,73.17691823899371,64.72327044025158,10.840251572327047,34.9622641509434,10.504223727775694,3.7105018867924535,1312,55,237,30,18,435,169,318,0.18100000000000002,0.684,0.135,-0.9751,2,4,2,0,1,0,28.0,4,0,0,3,16,15,1,4,19,2,26,4,1,3,3,49,45,27,0,3,7,0,2,2,2,0,2,0,0,6,12,27,3,0,5,3,0,4,3,7,0,1,8,4,19,7,45,36,11,36,0,1,2,0,39,16,0,1,17,163,31,4,0.0,0.11251428754259624,0.0926690866005496,0.0,0.0,0.09279564021145673,0.0,0.2029707183323894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057822927074949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726455705456055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057887874482187136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965662377026342,0.08398605692531085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08180124241368535,0.0,0.10262004553133414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061242550081100876,0.0,0.08179051938931894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943579259138459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932845705408778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21181517393331514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09603114940505117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077451801916777,0.0,0.10412078885223723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793803811398407,0.07964951103033067,0.1518993645696941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25460375871423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942350030112886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927871458401852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594881079030479,0.0,0.0,0.08073318591390126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092943927754218,0.06980790082369233,0.07041302326771813,0.0,0.09171476568692992,0.10099302594947536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283445112678542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423961662751097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908656846063493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498756792301766,0.0,0.4866800439256857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442900055178214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29782429453195125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617689354213998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640331317929647,0.0,0.07835348787276777,0.056010971239738264,0.07537631220936497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28931516530372303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OceannMa03,2020/03/31,"Hello everyone, I'd like some assumptions about my sisters health I have a sister(25) who's a year younger to me. She has been like this ever since I can remember and mom tells me she was like this since 3 months old.
Condition: if she gets spooked, she will go into shock and fall or freeze up and have attacks.
She cannot walk (same for going to toilet) without someone holding her or else she may fall because she has no function or strength on her right arms and leg(right part of her body). She's been under medication since she was a baby.
When she was in the nursery and 1st grade, she was in school and could run and play around but occasionally she used to get attacks then she'd fall. After that my parents decided to take her out of school as it was risky keeping her in school. She has violent outbursts of anger and sudden mood shifts too. She still thinks like a kid and is very child like. If she sees toys in shops and malls she would act up until she gets it. She isn't scared of my parents either and can be very abusive and angry at the smallest thing. She takes medication from doctors to stop the fits/attacks which leaves her subdued. 
Would anyone care to shed some light into this? Thank you in advance",4.684698529411765,5.8923275041666665,4.469215686274512,88.16558823529414,69.79166666666666,7.147058823529411,27.867647058823533,7.285733465282438,1.310345588235294,971,33,197,9,17,296,144,240,0.133,0.763,0.10400000000000001,-0.9155,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,2,6,16,4,1,7,0,24,6,2,1,1,39,37,22,0,5,8,4,1,5,0,4,4,0,0,2,9,16,0,3,3,4,1,9,4,6,0,0,7,3,34,9,31,23,5,35,0,0,1,0,36,15,0,8,16,133,43,5,0.0,0.13088434752526676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772405143161988,0.0,0.0,0.0983383112153789,0.0,0.3770136463218136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733915173534924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270301171433776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262762218698485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819824778636624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306680553388053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922803100697734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09992297479550144,0.0,0.10555515906601323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17314204302579472,0.0,0.12556093986159542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742037275340535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09818740723764777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696772364986052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698409532528641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22256608867181654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12937664284669625,0.08817304274076161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591566268364915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24531921731004805,0.119624096928603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12513663617012594,0.18867501068301126,0.0,0.0,0.11059590684248684,0.3353929837120144,0.08802723514265902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741362712895354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359762710518474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821842581234113,0.0923546642115634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611362385040787,0.0,0.09655230130579688,0.10170240745597922,0.0,0.0,0.0733888146328788,0.0707822611112743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09540730291306464,0.0,0.1822923179009355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648544559024893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15694399504229192,0.0,0.0,0.07113659150709037
mentalhealth,Serendipity1481,2020/03/31,I've been having severe sudden erratic mood swings recently is this something I should worry about? Recently I've been having severe mood swings and it starting to get worryingly worse and worse and I've been having irregular sleep patterns and just wanted to know if it's normal or not.,6.256698113207547,8.259112358490569,6.720896226415096,70.47681603773587,66.9245283018868,9.073584905660377,28.34433962264151,9.516144504307137,2.9024754716981134,237,8,36,5,4,77,34,53,0.25,0.75,0.0,-0.9231,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,8,1,1,0,0,12,12,6,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,3,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,23,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330477465604638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191851869134842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21248496129142266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4282627128374858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48999906764517204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21702499403931771,0.0,0.0,0.16695586976091334,0.0,0.0,0.15350055153999878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791458602385405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4404807222719338,0.4420148019762815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatsmeegirl,2020/03/31,Immediate Resource During this Crisis I found this link . You will be immediately connected to someone to talk to. It's helpful if you're an inch away from loosing it and just need someone to talk to. [https://nycwell.cityofnewyork.us/en/get-help-now/chat-with-a-counselor-now/](https://nycwell.cityofnewyork.us/en/get-help-now/chat-with-a-counselor-now/),20.270769230769233,27.595528384615392,8.328923076923079,49.24107692307695,47.20512820512821,7.222564102564102,30.87692307692308,8.238735603445708,3.0591600000000003,313,9,28,4,5,69,30,39,0.11699999999999999,0.816,0.067,-0.4723,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,4,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,7,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21546724708466616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514533663486313,0.0,0.0,0.2396355494605996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4611541046660938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17004857464707718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886286382138461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3686606570921337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5517221664053127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tyxylil,2020/03/31,"I don’t feel depressed but I still don’t take care of myself. Am I just lazy? Or is something else wrong. When I have a routine or something to do like being at college and needing to get ready for the day for class I don’t really have an issue changing my clothes or showering, but whenever I’m home for a break (or now because of the coronavirus) I barely shower, my hair gets greasy, I don’t change my clothes, sometimes I don’t brush my teeth and I put off taking my meds. I try to make a to do list for myself each days that includes brushing my teeth and taking my meds at least but it doesn’t really help. I feel like I can’t use depression as an excuse because I don’t necessarily feel depressed at the moment. But I feel like at the same time I haven’t grown out of the bad habits I had when I was really depressed. Does anyone else feel this way or am I just being lazy.",3.303330561330561,4.113910875675678,4.5664864864864905,87.66968814968818,72.67567567567569,7.422037422037422,25.582120582120577,7.61054688173877,1.1443846153846151,692,21,151,8,13,229,93,185,0.163,0.7190000000000001,0.11800000000000001,-0.8948,2,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,0,10,0,20,3,3,2,0,25,35,15,0,1,11,0,6,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,3,5,0,0,5,0,0,2,9,6,0,0,2,8,27,4,18,31,3,18,0,4,0,0,2,6,0,5,11,99,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765811896338695,0.1284512517089085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467453382181968,0.1528426739766769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12781796692619407,0.0,0.2652390825330481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161700100397128,0.0,0.4319067438985514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970775141622524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20945273266721348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31694153981759804,0.17912155409203634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13099607064575616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402951316335258,0.0,0.1257513110166102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308484833019345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18374101149509814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836821072348442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785044945192852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295655485097876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12602644541234526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409360766937613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193024194931905,0.12398918503281167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011664646566387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827766217604911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310133639121771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08511460202091099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827510384631643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950889729182627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13706694124612348,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AzureNightsForever,2020/03/31,"Evidence-based books or resources to achieve Self-actualisation during COVID-19 period? Does anyone have any recommendations for any evidence-based practical books on how to achieve Self-actualisation? And if you recommend something, why have you recommended that specific book or resource?

There are tons of self-help books out there, lots of which are anecdotal and it's a bit of a minefield. 

Recently a lot of my colleagues and patients have enquired about books that they can read and use techniques to achieve ""self love"" or ""self positivity"" while they are isolated and on their own. This promoted me to have a look and I realised that there were SO MANY books out there. This isn't my particular speciality and I am concerned with peoples mental health during this period in time, so any advice or support I can give would make such a difference. 

Regards.",8.883333333333333,9.863263866666667,8.138000000000002,66.40233333333336,60.33333333333334,11.733333333333334,39.333333333333336,11.429527900616536,4.839133333333333,700,34,113,19,9,219,93,150,0.016,0.8640000000000001,0.12,0.9386,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,3,4,9,3,0,0,5,0,13,2,0,3,0,21,19,16,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,8,10,0,0,0,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,11,3,16,17,5,10,0,0,1,1,9,5,0,7,5,78,19,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550733141255064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28290234394542124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096961726380366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15139240888381547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448812902720601,0.0,0.0,0.12135159983376208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302550085144993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14740039155861193,0.0,0.0,0.09294799796723296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164484012650344,0.0,0.0,0.2357856156754101,0.1251556545808258,0.0,0.09256372005913624,0.140590250169938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974737594628506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613675223312684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870815285379512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369205144311378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7233185324855289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675542320041734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157361783758983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085995753758844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976689800219507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251286716818829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850763449111843,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ajfbkd_c,2020/03/31,"Please tell me what's happening with my mind It's been a while since I've been able to connect to my memories, now, my brain refuses to believe that those memories were me, and the only explanation it can kind of accept is that my mind was switched out somewhere and the new person in this body just adopted those memories.

I don't know where my thoughts are coming from, like obviously from my head but who is putting them there? Even things I did mere minutes ago! They were done by another version of me that keep switching out, so I didn't do those really. 

I can't search through my mind to try and figure out who I actually was before because it's like it's not there anymore, it's easier for me to think as someone else than as myself. Like thinking as if I have another identity (which I don't even realize I'm doing until I remember that it doesn't line up with who I actually am) Sometimes I won't recognize my own voice so I end up either trailing off or I'll blindly stumble along the sentence hoping it makes sense.

Even my own name feels foreign to me now! And sometimes my family, and I can't even begin to figure anything out from the inside brain bc it'll kind of kick me out and leave me confused as to whose body I'm in, bc it feels so foreign to me.

I can't tell if I'm faking or not, or if I did this to myself but if anyone knows how to stop it please help",4.446786682152536,4.695176491289203,5.635301974448314,83.05905439411539,69.80139372822299,8.886488579171507,29.8817266744096,8.841846274778883,2.180214246999613,1091,40,231,18,18,365,146,287,0.039,0.862,0.099,0.9407,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,0,14,9,0,1,5,0,26,6,5,2,1,52,42,25,0,5,13,0,2,3,0,2,1,1,0,1,26,15,0,3,12,0,0,2,10,2,0,0,11,4,36,7,39,29,4,22,0,0,1,0,12,11,0,9,12,166,62,0,0.11102187680003296,0.0,0.2166826733171348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098414195106499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328322360011959,0.0,0.0,0.11010386931741226,0.07762907764579484,0.0,0.09136154492945918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06767790562949534,0.0,0.09447144000922066,0.12508363670833986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466405540685935,0.0,0.2478742632959379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563551631442974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361392593874982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274453205035317,0.0,0.09833242980595493,0.0,0.0,0.293315610216657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466154475306824,0.0,0.1122719934884966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817627899889042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394047540906607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441562377833844,0.0,0.0,0.11026977423803656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986813452469738,0.0,0.23122440036107486,0.12202944003277295,0.0,0.0,0.1175561372377168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16271904321866068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410796486302393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33630134036571785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722562043457506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443714014379668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09694002050837204,0.0,0.2437373629650987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160765063216528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112345715573064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1257661439929981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183844375740606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940684759330602,0.0,0.21960694995454333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281926023539183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940760276210637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375800174175952,0.14227667157311202,0.0,0.08813896891524667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537656667983023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adriyamma,2020/03/31,"I'm dating someone neurotypical and I often feel like I can't open up to them about my mental health struggles because they won't understand. Has anyone else experienced this? I really like them but I'm concerned about the longterm. Mental illness is a huge part of life and it's nice to be with someone who understands, ya know?",4.831428571428571,6.7703676984126995,5.4319365079365065,78.56028571428574,70.42857142857143,8.214603174603175,30.06031746031745,8.841846274778883,2.592513650793651,267,11,47,5,5,86,50,63,0.083,0.752,0.165,0.6381,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,3,0,3,4,0,1,2,0,5,3,0,0,0,10,11,3,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,8,3,7,9,1,4,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,3,30,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555568161251675,0.22794771299480146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13561618714291312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858458783266634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248796441189024,0.15893324533684786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364761485012468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226418077288273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571377659550281,0.21737607482187687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4483966545474552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24091428979725724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252054619844556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37699771935101584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325748735478829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4632000761526428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ForRandomStuff02,2020/03/31,"I'm trying not to relapse, but it's getting harder by the day I'm trying not to relapse, but everyday it's getting harder.

I've selfharmed for probably 2 years and I got out of therapy in November. My family and I were advised to get 'system therapy' (I don't know how it's called in English, but the entire family gets therapy and help on how to deal with each other and their problems) This Monday we had the intake over Skype but they said we were doing fine. I was asking for help when I needed it, my brother improved his behavioural issues etc.

But now our government has announced they are extending the 'intelligent lockdown'  (I'm from the Netherlands) for an extra month and I feel hopeless. Our finals are cancelled so I don't have to do anything for school, I can't go see my friends, I can't go to scouting, I'm stuck home. I live alone. I don't feel like doing anything and I'm so bored the entire day. Everyday I think about cutting myself, but I still have control over myself. But with the extension of the lockdown it's suddenly all too much, I'm crying in my room. My friends ask me how they can help but all I want is a hug.

I don't know what to do. I also feel guilty for feeling like this because there are people dying/grieving.",3.2988095238095285,4.85708284920635,4.729555555555557,83.59600000000003,73.6825396825397,7.262222222222222,28.07619047619048,7.908726449838941,1.8485057142857144,986,39,190,14,20,329,133,252,0.114,0.746,0.14,0.8228,0,3,0,0,0,2,27.0,4,0,4,1,12,10,1,0,10,0,22,1,0,4,2,38,49,21,0,3,10,1,4,2,2,0,0,1,2,0,9,12,0,1,7,0,0,2,8,4,0,0,7,6,33,6,26,42,6,23,0,1,1,1,21,8,0,0,14,133,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268186454012462,0.0,0.09792119343229252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015276608061601,0.0,0.2289437009560316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464283807975766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503255209847228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733524379173995,0.0,0.0,0.13450279049003408,0.15793697005412474,0.12623795964991538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365612908762546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308651447031735,0.0,0.2476524695291741,0.1749529867650267,0.0,0.13413521260056568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18920521525758965,0.0,0.25589498628603524,0.0,0.13917943219815418,0.0,0.09793242346013817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462218638989567,0.0,0.12282479103921473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12780334049348754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458784884974415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196432925683425,0.0,0.10812335483810716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773639825705308,0.0,0.0900129756789401,0.09079324368863777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488965458003526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132019077225425,0.11716568700695887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164755792962914,0.0,0.0,0.12392337162533093,0.09757477618942233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778670363180424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4200880425071816,0.0,0.0,0.07845939128862675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16626758199321595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222268729566568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885215279036915
mentalhealth,mrkrabserotica,2020/03/31,"My loneliness makes me feel so worthless and even suicidal A lot of people (on the internet and irl) do not seem to understand that I don’t have anyone to talk to, and the people who are there ignore me for weeks on end.
It’s so tiring being in “the prime of my life” and not even having one experience to look back on of being invited to a party (not a kids birthday party because those invites were usually done by the parents) or invited to a group gathering and genuinely being wanted there

I try so hard to be a likeable person but many have suggested it’s just my Age (I’m a teenager). I also suffer from autism so my mind works completely differently from those around me so I’ve never really understood how people my age act so petty and selfishly. I try to do everything for my ‘friends’, I make them things, I bake them cookies, I’m always there if they need a shoulder to cry on but everyone in my life has just spat that in my face and acted so horribly towards me.
I had to even transfer schools due to bullying from rumours and lies started from my “friends”

It just hurts when you feel like no one even wants you alive.
I know that I might get a pm or something from someone, I appreciate that, but I don’t want to be online friends with anyone as it scares me quite a bit (due to past experiences and the fact I have no idea who I’m talking to)
I just want to be a normal teenager, I want to be invited to parties, I want to be messaged and text, I want people to be nice to me, I want people in my life to talk to me and want me to be around.

But I guess it’s even pointless when someone who you thought was your closest friend can’t even respond when you just ask for a little bit of help.

Please be nice if you want to comment.",5.504832402234636,4.998108617318437,6.487089385474862,80.43521508379891,67.57541899441341,9.729832402234637,32.14581005586592,9.255337874911486,2.6055056983240226,1367,51,285,23,20,458,167,358,0.13699999999999998,0.7170000000000001,0.146,-0.5336,2,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,6,3,2,29,13,0,1,16,0,27,8,3,3,2,60,55,32,1,14,16,1,3,1,4,1,4,0,1,2,15,14,1,1,8,0,0,2,9,6,0,2,6,4,45,7,50,37,3,29,0,3,1,0,31,13,0,8,15,208,60,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615131098844923,0.06882982978736722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11567976900009945,0.0,0.0,0.1472770245765856,0.07733221701010473,0.0,0.0,0.06360672483913239,0.0,0.05042546380205927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18061805974191728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673055186309196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086425124784316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642499889782287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465148051711352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326554114859786,0.0,0.0,0.3278154564917478,0.0,0.0,0.07904269233331848,0.07434357848550369,0.16183244922422466,0.0,0.0,0.08365163329126256,0.059095324669698385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556376734479975,0.0,0.0432178883468602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09112562203489123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741010478629004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055445603823574566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855368085613984,0.09338103273521252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0454608564931447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528316263791524,0.04041290948850085,0.0829073679342063,0.0,0.0,0.06946413116618036,0.0,0.0,0.07032575267863829,0.0,0.0,0.1104327465481162,0.08386529546475692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775305596856164,0.08352381725105093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133597731373688,0.0637989148220203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104822908263529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210669147598804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918509885677964,0.0,0.07896578722631918,0.2867388428894517,0.0722280846259729,0.0,0.09080193498223073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798311085339222,0.0,0.0,0.052992675836005365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281734701766684,0.08371725474110685,0.0,0.07530535983678137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401771075495612,0.06368204835218777,0.0,0.0,0.05854978060523518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048246857514257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19946208088012726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05495562270059942,0.0,0.0,0.06567059582070786,0.0,0.0950746968610752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11232316660167983,0.0,0.0,0.08611464149383716,0.0,0.0,0.09110460945622614,0.0,0.4879051490544367,0.0,0.06635315175953438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060221288002068926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lepetitebourdon,2020/03/31,Medication I just started taking anti anxiety medication and I’ve never had medication I have to take daily. I’m looking for systems/advice on how to 1.) remember to take it everyday at the right time and 2.) remember that I actually took it (could not remember if I took it yesterday for the life of me). Thanks I’m advance!,2.2838095238095235,4.897779285714286,5.900952380952388,68.78571428571429,81.53968253968254,9.94920634920635,31.222222222222207,9.957137785484203,4.299641269841271,257,14,44,10,7,96,43,63,0.073,0.878,0.049,-0.1007,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,3,4,0,1,1,11,13,4,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,3,1,5,1,8,9,0,11,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,5,29,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.1581902064641673,0.0,0.0,0.15840623904388262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400918391320807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294269240426569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449891161106986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612660728228707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4899084444869998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250246663596295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5508969954972762,0.13843600575584442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473810810136954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656463010798154,0.0,0.0,0.14924366521026414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094524197541618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602072135488793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Minkstix,2020/03/31,"What draws the line between mental health problems and personality traits? Can someone explain to my stupid brain where the line is drawn? How do you recognize what is a mental health disorder symptom and what is a personality trait/quirk?

My girlfriend has BPD among other things. I am struggling to comprehend when her BPD is acting out versus when it's her personality. I want to be a good boyfriend, but I can't seem to figure out where the line is drawn.",6.155686274509804,7.705327647058827,6.038529411764706,77.00171568627455,66.64705882352939,8.490196078431373,30.637254901960784,8.841846274778883,2.456725490196078,370,14,66,6,6,116,56,85,0.102,0.86,0.038,-0.6416,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,5,4,1,1,6,0,11,4,1,1,0,12,14,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,6,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,8,1,8,13,0,8,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,2,47,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4562822441063946,0.20221359415077114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20760361937441216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193272548884074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38508945570537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650956443898568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4744967800221464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17332775728397007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490423333249474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348043287575264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893682133122768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18827516504434347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12034222860622786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684183000809536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BluVenom888811,2020/03/31,"How can i help my dad Right now i am 14 I dont live in the same country as my father and so we video call and message eachother to communicate.I dont know what condition he has but i know that he has one.Since 2012 or even earlier,he was fine but over time his mental health was deteriorating and getting bit by bit worse(at that time we were living 
together and at 2016 i believe my mother divorced my father due to not being able to handle him anymore)and i think there is no way to convince him to take any form of medicine to cure whatever he has.I assume he has schizophrenia or something like that as sometimes when he calls us(i have 2 brothers) he asks us if we can hear some voices that he hears and he told us that he talked to an insect and an alien,but for those two im not sure if he was joking or not because he is usually very playful and says stuff like that.I really love my father alot and i dont want to accept the fact that he will eventually become unable to understand and i want to make sure i can at least try to do something for him i really really love him and im tearing up alot writing this any suggestion will help alot thanks so much for listening really anything will help and i forgot to
Mention that my mother said that his condition is due to too much stress.My dad does not do anything to physically harm anyone but sometimes he behaves wierdly and i dont want it to become worse to the point where he does something to hurt himself or others and i think something that contributes to his condition is his brothers death.He blames someone named”munshi” for his brothers death but we dont know anyone by that name.He brings that name up often and sometimes when we tell him about something he will say that munshi is doing that and i cant really explain this but he always tells us stuff relating to the clock for example he tells us that 1 is good or 7 is dangerous and 4 is military or point at 9 or dont point at 3 its hard to explain i just really want him to get better",4.329355400696862,5.196066768292685,5.288031358885019,83.23054878048781,70.34146341463415,8.393728222996515,28.057491289198605,8.634040054169528,1.9481637630662023,1605,55,325,26,28,527,190,410,0.10099999999999999,0.7829999999999999,0.11599999999999999,0.8973,0,0,5,0,1,0,13.0,9,0,0,1,13,17,1,0,9,0,35,3,0,2,3,68,62,37,1,6,19,10,1,2,0,4,1,7,0,0,23,21,0,1,10,3,0,1,12,3,0,1,7,8,42,14,40,50,11,24,0,1,0,2,75,13,0,15,11,203,65,0,0.06539617659082374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05441485770204525,0.0,0.0,0.08894328522441934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914530544182921,0.0,0.10763096243776732,0.0,0.0611365972774911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039864902264400086,0.14444987825582092,0.0,0.07367909668411053,0.0,0.05783760383066254,0.1427913747518781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355361606020788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445726966337412,0.0,0.4598629915148189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04319355787220855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833360628210934,0.0,0.0,0.05485121022379992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058582129107229375,0.0,0.0,0.06951307765296214,0.14741248773440502,0.0,0.13150103602976773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07000795959637215,0.0,0.14127818551667004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782008518964507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389853718760803,0.0,0.11549204408638655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180452052208399,0.0,0.04365245568400835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06590396465866273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614742874954788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04431414172429494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18546157437189464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513667917333208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055847977489925225,0.06220673951162702,0.10401132887070924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409639306137165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05540996820679068,0.25172585853866675,0.1940354724726908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491109933417175,0.0,0.14972595259664748,0.0,0.0,0.12327024500978295,0.0,0.04916978614170455,0.05256296958056216,0.17147742238062538,0.060208013151411575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380645875504696,0.0,0.0,0.07626607294446101,0.0,0.0,0.06248884922411176,0.0,0.044399711187396496,0.0,0.0638825620931241,0.06807972615108553,0.393317742099569,0.0,0.07202464941255488,0.05395869452909182,0.15428943723911467,0.05190844103633276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664429089771796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,0detoanightingale,2020/03/31,"Help with Obsessive Thoughts Hi, my name is Clare. I’ve been struggling with depression and anxiety for sometime now, but one aspect that I have struggled to get under control or have tools to work with is obsessive thoughts. I will often get fixated on something, typically a bad event that has happened or one that I imagine will happen, and I can’t get them out of my head. They act like intrusive thoughts, i will be doing something and they will flash in and it can be debilitating. My therapist is considering some options in our work, but I wanted to hear from others who might have experienced it or something similar— what has helped you cope with/overcome them?",11.509756097560976,8.762637373983742,10.3129430894309,64.93917073170735,57.3739837398374,13.742439024390244,45.73821138211382,11.979248473330829,5.395111869918699,539,26,93,12,5,170,80,123,0.13699999999999998,0.823,0.04,-0.8793,0,0,3,0,0,0,12.0,1,1,4,3,2,7,0,4,1,0,19,1,1,1,0,24,29,9,0,1,5,0,0,1,0,5,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,6,0,2,4,2,15,1,14,18,1,8,0,1,0,0,12,5,0,7,3,71,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12686630433525134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846855413851242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860024275605688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428368012894808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599319410061208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933015825937932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17019855559684613,0.0,0.1869124927450562,0.0,0.222316637444954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102050953795129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1759288652579754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247534607371668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3830126613909953,0.16401891227460216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34674165086502257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19255174456219676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3949726858865647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978160797698284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414653881996623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aichisalmon,2020/03/31,"undiagnosed i'm undiagnosed, but i have done self-harm countless of times. the temporary physical pain is such a haven that  makes me forget of the heaviness that i feel in my chest. 

am i crazy or just overthinking?",5.489666666666667,7.263509300000003,6.130000000000003,74.8616666666667,68.5,11.333333333333336,30.833333333333336,11.20814326018867,3.910583333333333,172,7,32,6,3,56,33,40,0.242,0.758,0.0,-0.872,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,4,2,1,1,0,6,7,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,5,0,3,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4929843127875093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435807542864461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3215632575690989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5126022434865297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5025568622729297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28090477928149715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snipsandsnaps,2020/03/31,"Anyone experienced mental diarrhea ? Help Backstory : I had really bad food poisoning a year ago and couldn’t walk 50 meters without needing to go to the bathroom , this lasted a few weeks. Since then I have had a case of mental diarrhea.

Example : if I have to go somewhere far I freak out/ if I get stuck in traffic I freak out etc etc thinking I am on the verge of shitting myself ( didn’t know how else to describe it).

I have realised that if I know where I can access toilets on the way somewhere I feel fine, also if I am truly focusing on something else I am sort of ok. However this is a huge issue when I have to go somewhere I don’t know 😔 . I have been fortunate not to actually poo myself as of yet, however the mental trauma is killing me. 

The doctor recommended me to go and visit a psychologist however I am not sure what they could do 

Thanks",4.176929824561402,5.195293432748539,6.045862573099416,77.09756578947369,70.81286549707602,9.208771929824564,30.624269005847953,9.516144504307137,2.880991812865497,671,28,128,15,12,233,100,171,0.158,0.732,0.11,-0.8863,3,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,0,5,11,3,0,10,1,20,4,1,1,1,22,33,11,1,7,7,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,4,1,0,5,0,0,6,6,7,0,0,5,2,22,4,19,26,3,25,0,0,0,0,3,11,1,5,7,93,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.14793424663499732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343792707408719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122997051262507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599831488780367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265749747768783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103577667984465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15516327101701954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532753038043566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381356106028573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665067317413736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833085254224188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07920180645887162,0.0,0.3446183174434604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016105171031352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15822514673652854,0.0,0.0,0.16771672033532328,0.0,0.2499369193048162,0.12356965232074495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45831443745719397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240531155014796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711524130044503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560945208186633,0.12540043725137193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670475956655367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14287590862826538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13956773729179806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713555726764644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032856230559445,0.12159986719889285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613157217514972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976218101778262
mentalhealth,Jazzarya,2020/03/31,"Anyone else struggling to get out of bed in the morning? I’m a kindergarten teacher and have been WFH since March 13. Some days, like Sunday and yesterday, I got up right away and was very productive. Not in a crazy way, but did a couple chores, homework, and filmed some videos for my students. But then I have days like today where I absolutely struggle to get out of bed. It’s nearly noon and I just don’t have the energy or motivation to do anything. 

Before WFH I would wake up at 4:40 every morning and walk the dogs before going to work. 

Anyone else struggling with this? Any tips on how to get out of this funk?

Note: I’m on 40 mg of Prozac daily for anxiety which does help a lot.",2.716304347826089,4.591894036231885,3.687753623188408,89.1059782608696,76.02898550724638,6.339130434782609,22.369565217391305,7.1686216300943375,0.6686695652173915,539,15,111,6,12,173,91,138,0.078,0.8079999999999999,0.115,0.6507,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,3,5,0,3,7,0,9,2,1,2,0,21,16,11,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,4,0,4,10,0,0,1,2,0,2,2,3,0,0,4,0,6,2,24,11,3,25,0,0,0,0,1,14,0,4,10,67,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090975101626066,0.0,0.1227280707889774,0.0,0.0,0.22435196785516914,0.3287578085766375,0.1320197470639595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072872552934935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2730272484865513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17751210702587303,0.0,0.2069274138863656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14039287067907694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680363969831435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351687095830467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514532587929372,0.0,0.09117573916058756,0.0,0.12831006644793858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753246167639173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156755426620712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639135987844914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700585213138372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270887795255445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5031470030102977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520683361054048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237107691480618,0.0,0.1273414099602334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11679453189455652,0.0,0.0,0.11396446036936135,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lunaravenpearl,2020/03/31,"How is a person diagnosed as ""no longer having"" a mental illness? How does it work when someone is given a mental health diagnosis, and years later, the symptoms are highly reduced or eliminated? I have a few questions regarding the issue. 

First, what are the terms used by psychologists and psychiatrists to evaluate this phenomenon? That is, when a psychiatrist evaluates a  patient, and determines that the patient no longer has that mental illness, what is that called? Is it considered a diagnosis to essentially say that someone no longer has a mental illness or is it called something else? 

Second, what standards exist in professional bodies and diagnostic manuals, for psychiatrists and psychologists to determine that  someone no longer has a mental illness? Is there a general timeframe for symptoms to have not appeared before a ""diagnosis"" of ""no mental illness"" has occured? 

Any literature on the subject would also be helpful.",9.60590909090909,11.409933097402599,9.725090909090913,52.7676363636364,58.93506493506493,12.134025974025974,43.971428571428575,11.792908689023552,6.320789090909091,763,44,93,23,10,252,84,154,0.16,0.823,0.018000000000000002,-0.9621,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,0,16,0,18,10,1,3,0,16,21,13,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,9,1,0,1,13,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,11,18,2,10,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,4,6,81,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976885711933255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307066188309317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039462505152174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568841979080545,0.0,0.0,0.24947104787076185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398635516817885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069000444977688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204614602552572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390632273744324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129846729982873,0.0,0.0,0.0818789792000033,0.12906513138730952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274997300270402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7386305937903925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666241200229462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13684332406708552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714381373286296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105086160632741,0.0940421016792207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539349146625082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055040621082307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893144357140698,0.0,0.0,0.08677652807953136,0.0,0.0,0.07866483109129134
mentalhealth,ieatassandballs,2020/03/31,"I don't mentally feel anything I don't know what to say. Sorry for my bad English im still learning and I'm not much of a talker or storyteller.

I don't feel anything when someone says something mean or when i make someone feel bad.
I'm trying to run a company alone which is not going well, i only have a few friends and I'm only 24.
I'm in a relationship now and i don't really do something when we fight or anything but i love her.
Is there something wrong with me?
Am i like normal? Is there someone like me?
Also feel free to ask me anything.",0.3802564102564112,2.5214292478632494,2.8464957264957285,90.6846153846154,85.5811965811966,5.309401709401709,23.52991452991453,6.67199483983844,0.76997094017094,430,17,92,5,13,148,65,117,0.12300000000000001,0.713,0.16399999999999998,0.87,0,1,3,0,1,0,10.0,1,0,0,0,9,10,1,0,4,0,10,1,0,1,0,20,24,11,0,1,6,0,4,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,0,7,0,1,2,6,4,1,0,0,6,14,7,7,24,2,8,0,0,0,1,10,1,0,3,7,57,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14479453204973725,0.0,0.11180101582003864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4601863274786152,0.0,0.13069764284573346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23346059885376336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28275592538450345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108012037653902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07945369820154946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101205051323033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683248993916465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13660211008808587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617835109122855,0.0,0.09332009494136932,0.0,0.0,0.15228727877802528,0.0,0.0,0.14088930720138396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027718491283336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697800098679866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21265411752599264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956186810147909,0.0,0.0,0.15009691741538694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22235512144963696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35536581477936796,0.3228832923591761,0.0,0.1564988626585398,0.0,0.0,0.1116474627863696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491757561980886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570036938694096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15285346405671385,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YunGTwipZ,2020/03/31,"Mental Health is Getting Worse in Quarantine Ever since quarantine was put into place, my mental health is getting worse. I’ve been having panic attacks, can’t sleep at all, depression, just wanna kill myself cause the world is ending. I have tried to take walks and stay off social media but nothing is working. Feel like if this doesn’t end, I’m just gonna end my life myself.",3.5341071428571422,6.067027847222222,3.990873015873017,84.77000000000002,76.08333333333333,5.7809523809523835,21.3968253968254,6.868970318607317,0.7304658730158731,303,8,52,3,7,95,57,72,0.177,0.78,0.043,-0.7992,0,2,0,0,0,2,9.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,2,1,1,0,10,4,1,1,2,11,16,3,1,2,4,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,2,1,5,1,6,13,1,13,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,1,5,30,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18616937349370466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16810809707190197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14094686667528833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4348216684477098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802592264334244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274363406008656,0.11690774529425155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17099511378438534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3478931456858613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18104851997394147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11558703076529328,0.07994849263437362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32983056357734136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702142112933584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920016959100908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17097379216842562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645080365150918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353685161685358,0.0,0.16376279668029128,0.16681507622723804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744233854447947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304038427803475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110395132871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913522835161999,0.0,0.33353568544555345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Thr0w_4w4y_th0ughts,2020/03/31,"Struggling with partners mh I'm posting this here as it has such complex mental health elements I'm not sure the normal relationship thread would be suitable. I hate that I'm posting at all but I'm questioning myself so much  I feel like I'm just running in circles.

So I've been with my husband 6 years now married 3. We were extremely open about our mental health problems from the get go. He has ptsd and is suspected to have some type of bipolar. I have cptsd, and depression. In the beginning that was fine we dealt with our problems together probably not using the healthiest coping methods but we got through it. We moved in together and things were still great. I'm not going to say there weren't challenges but we managed. Then 18mths in, we found out we were expecting. The pregnancy wasnt easy but we were still great, we were already planning on getting married so this was just good news. 

After the baby was born I had a lot of complications. I was in and out of hospital for nearly two years. This is were the issues started. During this time while I was sick my husband would sleep all day, leaving me to care for our child. Then during the summer he started getting super paranoid I any time I opened a window he shut it. Trying to keep the house cool was practically impossible. 

I mean we talked about all this and he would apologise and cry about how he hates not being around and sleeping all the time. After the birth of our second child he went and got help finally. Two years in and his episodes have been so much worse. I dread the summer coming. Last year, during an extreme episode I had to wrestle a knife from him as he was going to cut himself in front of the kids. I called the emergency team, I called his mother, i called his gp. No one would help me. After hours of juggling the kids and his paranoia his mother did appear only to say he'll be fine and leave. This particular incident set off my mental health issues so badly I was really struggling to keep things ""normal"" for the kids.

Now the summer is approaching. We're in lockdown and hes sleeping until 3/4/5 in the afternoon. I'm so god damn lonely and no one seems to understand. My family think I'm being dramatic. I have him what am I complaining about atleast he can help... yes he could but he doesn't. No matter how much he may protest that he does his bit. It's kinda hard to parent from your bed. I'm tired of doing everything and being told it's still not enough. I could be more supportive, I should have the house spotless, the dogs need x/y/z so do the kids. And god save me if things aren't as they should be. The house isnt clean enough when he gets up he will sit and tell me I'm not doing enough. I need to get on top of the house. So I do that and while my back is turned the kids are going wild. So I get grilled on why they were in the hall or in at a drawer. Well I dont have eyes on the back of my head! Dogs need walked fine I'll take them but who's watching the kids. Oh that's right his mother cause he wont watch them by himself. 

Like I know I'm complaining A LOT but I do genuinely love him. When hes good things are great but once his mental health goes it just affects every single part of our lives. I feel awful for being so annoyed. I truly do understand a lot of his issues cause most of the problems here but would I be cruel to say I'm done dealing with it? I'm done staying up for 3 days making sure he doesn't hurt himself while the kids are asleep. I'm done caring for the kids on no sleep and shot nerves. I'm done being triggered and having my own episodes, only to be left alone with the kids. Having a panic attack and flashbacks and disasosiating is all incredibly hard to deal with, then add two young kids who need to be cared for. 

Am I wrong for feeling so badly towards him?",2.1076281333146625,4.235120654145081,3.1980787004621227,90.71525206553707,78.85751295336787,6.038257947066237,21.96092984175885,7.113659591113569,0.6195358633244643,3003,89,625,36,74,963,321,772,0.16899999999999998,0.7090000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.9854,1,4,1,0,0,0,72.0,15,1,4,5,35,45,8,4,39,3,84,15,7,8,7,124,146,57,0,20,20,6,5,2,1,11,7,3,3,13,25,44,0,2,13,1,0,12,18,23,1,6,31,12,79,22,83,90,21,91,0,3,3,1,96,33,1,12,43,412,104,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05510078228011089,0.058709255983643266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036178892297146034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0473606771297518,0.0,0.060524466867752674,0.0,0.08181744754954914,0.08884217826683367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808233589612544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629742553070239,0.0,0.16272764045968086,0.10930533589375094,0.0,0.04582844219366541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495424998038174,0.0,0.0584394270370113,0.06862122342813799,0.1096969662173518,0.04582243471153169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046557052860463945,0.2177747112342937,0.06235184439716888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16491433199705854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044824617708144575,0.0,0.047814141105103125,0.0,0.050153705845492565,0.0,0.08070093771395496,0.03800721259281062,0.0,0.058279720006593976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05833277603464972,0.0,0.0,0.16677374862316854,0.0,0.12094271417512853,0.08924590640194346,0.08510031196386947,0.17596475787099985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531631462275084,0.10505107302008657,0.054600159982774885,0.2262031264803517,0.0,0.0,0.10697967378830077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05239283029868058,0.2455498774930781,0.05695338155745831,0.0,0.0,0.1665858521888928,0.0,0.09457600064342883,0.0,0.0,0.029238191803558536,0.043366380673597785,0.0,0.11266556291067853,0.05780366201004216,0.0,0.0,0.05198320005883825,0.0,0.046977961446284085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356902181896449,0.048016494501000685,0.0,0.035512461423317945,0.0,0.0,0.057952106845416934,0.0,0.0,0.21445867966982265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05654484989577701,0.11732782729805415,0.15779316163373944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042524866470205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05665793626724739,0.07210152207166567,0.08092438343420233,0.0,0.06242058005881172,0.05907404805487253,0.057612116392412586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190479652631013,0.0,0.057360291209574824,0.15272015380807602,0.06218978890472874,0.0,0.0595979347073693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03408228836406922,0.0,0.0,0.057118576581193674,0.0,0.04543385051549026,0.0,0.12692407264027925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048432711668682016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129599681374438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531269084867696,0.05670579545497429,0.12746052876510602,0.0,0.0,0.11123566556444106,0.0,0.0,0.060372511732190326,0.10028370115628042,0.0,0.040000959996157964,0.042761407125340115,0.04650051756800184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137903780553895,0.034089418188834944,0.0,0.0,0.09306679077645746,0.06114737901844161,0.0,0.050836380512534564,0.0,0.03612037412425575,0.05786803148454454,0.1559106116533466,0.11076942228183362,0.0,0.0459490753221257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04783460112803284,0.04931838885389731,0.04800614239806893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05421694547316399,0.1889643462651037,0.058167565615369024,0.0,0.13704026847072676
mentalhealth,kisp19,2020/03/31,"I’m afraid. What am I supposed to do with all this fear? Lockdown. Virus. My elderly grandparents. Trapped overseas. Losing my job. My ex. Quarantine. The economy. The uncertainty. The *uncertainty.*

What am I supposed to do with all this fear?",1.2650000000000006,0.7960988333333319,2.718095238095241,80.91857142857147,144.0,6.914285714285715,29.190476190476193,6.868970318607317,3.3742190476190483,189,11,31,6,14,61,26,42,0.324,0.6759999999999999,0.0,-0.9456,3,3,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,3,3,0,4,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,0,4,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,22,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8328916587673028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3672498893073932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4140277811446453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kitchen_Particular,2020/03/31,"Are support groups worth it? I'm new here, but I was wondering if anyone has ever attended an in-person or online support group in addition to this sub?

If so, how did you find the group? And was it useful?

If not, why not?

Trying to decide if one is right for me, but idk where to start",0.8399999999999999,2.7999216666666698,3.0599999999999987,90.935,82.33333333333334,6.0,18.333333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.2293333333333334,220,5,48,3,6,75,47,60,0.025,0.797,0.179,0.8767,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,2,1,17,12,10,0,4,9,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,3,0,3,2,5,9,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,6,3,35,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1877130907539406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24283694382726315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453670754734883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592798115111096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819150723851987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23440843842568346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22926290507566724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19001698180023807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6092892092303617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18226634569138006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318627713558985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24224289913321426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911328238600914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LordHastings,2020/03/31,"Need advice to help my mom  

So I want to apologize in advance, I'm stressed out and tired and I suck at writing all of this down anyways but anyways to whats going on:

About 2 months ago my mother started acting really strange, just staring out of windows and commenting about how funny it is to see the cars passing by and during conversations she would just blank and forget what she was talking about.

Ever since then its been getting worse and worse, she is now hearing people talking about her from outside, every car that passes by the person is flipping her off, there is always a car accident up the street or a fire or something.. Of course I dont see or hear any of this.

Just within the last 2 weeks its gotten to the point where she runs outside and starts shouting at every car that passes to slow down, or shouting out the window at the neighbors. It was extremely bizarre one day because when she was talking to me about the neighbors I noticed that she was staring right through me, I waved my hand in front of her face and she didnt even react or flinch or anything. According to my brother she had a full conversation with me in the garage by herself today.

The cops were called on her a week ago and she was hospitalized but she got out a day later telling the doctor she is fine.

Whats strange is whenever a doctor or a police officer is talking to her she acts like she is normal and nothing is wrong

I just don't know what to do to help her at this point, she is refusing help. I tried to get her into multiple doctors and talk to her about it but she gets angry with me and just tells me to fuck off. I'm seriously worried for her that it may be some sort of brain tumor or dementia or something. Does anybody know what I should do to get her help? Is there anything I can do?",6.200666666666668,5.813535511111112,6.376666666666669,81.405,66.1111111111111,8.866666666666667,33.0,8.07648339933343,2.3157666666666668,1424,54,283,15,20,456,179,360,0.13699999999999998,0.7809999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.9716,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,22,7,2,1,18,0,30,8,3,2,2,53,51,28,0,5,17,3,2,1,2,3,4,4,4,1,18,19,0,1,2,0,0,13,3,5,0,1,11,10,44,2,55,36,3,56,0,0,4,1,52,26,2,12,18,210,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710390509125907,0.17617227265587634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08268438888736547,0.0,0.0,0.06757548852451874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16354725033474246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060575460838935224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093057320260166,0.10146860245507057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817177093817142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051303888287194,0.08695997559759104,0.0,0.11646172887045082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563341497813716,0.08988649382491982,0.16744821343198554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186661765213433,0.20766837273907576,0.0,0.05647466295223096,0.0,0.07947583230735163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22399601831959606,0.0,0.2664243618097488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922308391707763,0.08100038927365917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04854750817399808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638177138068925,0.07931675050769876,0.0,0.0,0.07368212033449566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736219474613396,0.09534887368835444,0.1131342088752315,0.0,0.0,0.06733616299438952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889113649656606,0.08676666869950027,0.0,0.0,0.18787487568188468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365941962289376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848620410740548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15837117628390718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220047593953578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15300085057199192,0.0,0.0,0.14067019615735624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11382880946308005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3993520521244153,0.17370875622682178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11421201000924665,0.0941918113998865,0.0,0.0,0.06746618738593924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058611417766384365,0.0,0.15941837488009208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091577682276412,0.2025344804127828,0.07059009937453507,0.1086462689475607,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CayaLaura,2020/03/31,"Depression and Quarantine (I apologize for my bad english in advance).
I´m sure a lot of people with mental health issues have this problem too, that´s why I`m gonna talk about it. 
I 17/w, am diagnosed with depression and am currently recovering from anorexia. I´d say I was stable but that changed really quickly as soon as the quarantine started. 
I live in Germany and it´s now actually illegal to go out with more than 2 people and you have to have a certain distance to each other. I therefore often end up laying in bed, doing school, laying in bed.... and repeat.
I haven´t felt so lonely and disconnected in a while and there are 6 more people living in this house including my bf. I´ve even fallen back on my 6 Month strike on not selfharming. 

I can´t believe my whole stable mental health is colapsing and the only strengh I have, is to keep watching. All my distructive thoughts are coming back and I can´t even visit my therapist regulary because of quarantine. 

I know I have to do something before it gets worse but I feel so weak and miserable.

If you have some advice or help to offer, feel free to share it with me. 
Thank you.",4.098027545499264,6.410537046728972,5.013846532218398,79.17672651254306,73.39252336448598,8.243580914904085,28.55287752090507,8.99025400887824,2.660069158878505,904,37,157,20,19,294,138,214,0.158,0.741,0.10099999999999999,-0.9458,1,5,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,3,0,1,13,12,0,1,5,0,15,4,0,1,3,36,27,19,0,2,5,0,3,0,1,1,4,1,2,0,7,17,0,1,5,0,1,5,1,7,0,0,3,5,22,6,29,23,7,26,0,4,1,0,11,10,0,5,11,113,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.1356851116349301,0.0,0.0,0.13587041011421427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138297093408916,0.11609441338599548,0.0847588230288848,0.0,0.11831465513814167,0.15665292430312686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470881912219944,0.11977252734366595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395136536060956,0.14112488695694392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231501025098332,0.0,0.0,0.1836720984989231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406078089840344,0.0,0.13350229853949608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07264380084738124,0.0,0.07902087572245699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955906731140813,0.0,0.0,0.0931970430784634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043600877807446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512391272975275,0.0,0.12358707912490853,0.0,0.0,0.07641394644121494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24555358648662445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820869013838205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802436308689408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098214237913208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574784417374372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891830239028766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13304458921389362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890739815630136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057192312025657,0.0,0.1407181103364639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704146396328318,0.0,0.0,0.0984147713976306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104561014867813,0.0,0.0,0.11175683830862054,0.0,0.1280113594102162,0.0,0.16143868888120988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11038396059614404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125463941775254,0.15523562966650073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14169586120193636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DatAvPlays,2020/03/31,"Zero brain function Let me give you my background.All throughout school I have been a moderate student but never really studied,and I am here in 2020 preparing for the exams to join a mechanical engineering university.The school year starter pretty okay,I was not studing many hours and I was very efficient,I was on top of my class and the last 1-2 months stress is starting to kick in,I cant sleep,even on quarantine  when I would a morning e-class I would wake up way before my normal schedule,the outcome of this is that I dont sleep.I cant think straight I masturbate 3-4 times a day to relieve the stress or I think I will get a panic attack,I can't do subtractions and additions and I am tired throughout the day even if I have slept adequate hours.Am I just getting crazy?",4.3831472957422335,5.398226348101269,5.321944764096664,82.49008630609899,70.32911392405063,8.78342922899885,30.81933256616801,9.095868883498916,2.5228025316455693,625,26,126,12,11,205,101,158,0.141,0.758,0.10099999999999999,-0.7845,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,1,4,4,0,3,9,0,19,4,3,0,1,16,26,8,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,5,0,17,1,10,17,0,18,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,2,11,71,19,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806003913823357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508407019732793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17721686247140567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047604952115556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860531465092328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097049990802074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16588004726229194,0.1522869160851792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15633620826838598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940197126560704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623320450324368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16094700258961914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671227832501622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243734493715175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554073307389327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862582484793459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150523902875424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169894814944742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213257913405906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31772814850587194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123636617324321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3636938652621944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203440446005148,0.0,0.0,0.09256806769650036,0.1824591137145298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098490311992694,0.0,0.12600790622509758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255420768421027,0.0,0.0,0.1022294263864888
mentalhealth,larch303,2020/03/31,"My mental health is getting worse due to coronavirus quarantine I was prescribed new meds at the start of the month, which helped me greatly. I was making real progress and was starting to enjoy things once again. About 2-3 weeks after I started making progress, the quarantine period started and I could no longer go out and do the things that made me happy. It's also making things like grocery shopping or finding a desk chair (I need one now that I'm working from home) a lot more time consuming and stressful. I'm going stir crazy in isolation without a decent desk chair. My mental health is declining. The worst part is there is really not much that I can do. Everything is closed. While I am used to spending time alone and finding inner happiness and what not, I am a social creature and I need social interaction. It can't all come from within.",6.600931677018633,7.305192478260871,6.446763975155282,77.5183447204969,65.2111801242236,9.172919254658387,32.24906832298137,9.120678840339163,2.816547329192548,683,26,119,11,10,215,105,161,0.11699999999999999,0.773,0.11,-0.0516,0,4,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,5,7,0,1,9,0,15,2,0,5,1,27,32,10,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,10,10,0,0,2,1,2,3,5,2,0,1,4,0,13,5,13,27,6,24,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,2,16,83,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030226199656464,0.0,0.10061101789300046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083750435929635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10044985280237176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307082193035825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22997796467751705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573105918525017,0.0,0.14300259067929438,0.0,0.0,0.1387070808160762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678563155890595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26746243729577696,0.0,0.0,0.08432846688943071,0.0,0.12619869933974073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061464903701844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069600202227991,0.0,0.1190454180479218,0.2519394749606497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974766817326967,0.0,0.2535758106274777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004211465277642,0.0,0.0924855671096168,0.18657453703599586,0.0,0.12150905580593688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13398461782536916,0.08525279524683331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13624106180885268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320047099428013,0.08059775349977984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25649695844082965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3561987169163229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14411608495059816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250749730711298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14672282138434306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866031666640537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091800206501074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127732243665887,0.0,0.09159191245315827,0.0,0.12821216580527026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xgayb,2020/03/31,"Why do I lose emotion for people I haven't seen in a while? I'm an over emotional personal and I love my family and friends with everything in me. I cry over everything. But if I haven't seen someone in a long time and haven't had a connection with them in a while, I just don't feel anything anymore. 

One of my best friend's mom from middle school used to have cancer. I shaved my head for her. Years later, I find out she died and I didn't cry. I knew it was sad, but I didn't feel particularly sad.

I find out my grandfather (my dad's dad) passed away from cancer, and the same thing happened.

I find out my uncle died from overdose. Same thing.

My great grandparents took care of me most of my life when I was younger and I love them and care for them. I haven't seen them in a long time and they're getting really old. My great grandmother doesn't even remember me. I'm afraid that when they die, I'm not going to feel sad.

Why am I like this?",1.4701990049751252,3.1675484825870686,2.913258706467662,94.06501243781095,79.09950248756219,6.854726368159205,20.619402985074625,7.793537801064563,0.5262955223880592,739,19,175,12,18,241,101,201,0.17300000000000001,0.6559999999999999,0.171,0.2982,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,5,2,4,15,0,1,7,0,14,6,1,1,0,30,33,15,3,1,5,3,3,1,2,0,3,0,0,1,5,13,0,0,8,0,0,3,9,5,0,1,10,6,36,10,24,23,4,26,0,4,3,2,15,12,0,2,12,109,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11360331640936733,0.0,0.0,0.0942653020335645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762396651369724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021368365361325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335837404338697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516566930649899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566560047120619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25770779122336723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565952559575473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20590120817975135,0.0,0.1079880176617522,0.0,0.17376052557356034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140912481226993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17700286592159062,0.0,0.05984790890400346,0.0,0.06510168956726152,0.0,0.0,0.25258466362530674,0.0,0.0,0.10129662977467653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175618619034568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08091040655639146,0.055963588646488115,0.0,0.0,0.2027471774804108,0.0,0.12815270979788662,0.0,0.0,0.20677259910577467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13416016237444986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12020148138955553,0.0,0.07762238410558056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941489417880826,0.10002107910299893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338398420947019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976338741042906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11593122262770195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705826781403032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15220452580891566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13359063671255994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12726982153237792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893485384137043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20672802002411414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376676699413877
mentalhealth,PriyanshuRoy,2020/03/31,"I hate to see others better than me I'm kinda rambling,so forgive me.
I just watched a Jaiden Animations video. She plays the piano so friggin well,is a great youtuber and successful,despite not pursuing advanced education. I feel so friggin jealous of her. Till now,I've always stuck to being a professor who changes the world by doing something groundbreaking,on growing up,and all I got is pain in life,depsite being better than a vast majority in studies(not bragging).
 Whenever I see child prodigies,polyglots etc,I feel an intense wave of jealousy within me,kinda close to bloodlust.
From my childhood,my parents have never truly appreciated what I do. It used to be like this. When I do something- No reaction
When they see the neighbour's kid playing musical instruments- Look at that kid,you unskilled dumbass(indirectly).
Now,I hate anyone who is better than me. Whenever I lose something,I feel fear, and in turn,I start ruining the sportsman spirit and stuff. 
I don't know what to do. Whenever I lose,I feel like the winner deserves to die.
What should I do.",4.80728205128205,7.460019189743594,5.4575641025641035,75.22993589743591,72.48717948717949,7.615384615384617,33.91025641025641,8.515128840125781,3.2532564102564097,862,45,135,16,18,278,125,195,0.191,0.6509999999999999,0.158,-0.8383,1,0,3,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,1,5,5,16,3,1,10,0,13,1,0,1,2,17,29,8,1,1,2,1,4,2,1,1,1,0,0,2,10,4,0,0,6,3,0,2,4,7,0,0,2,9,18,9,19,23,2,15,1,2,5,0,10,8,0,1,7,82,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222696436329696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10271118675441383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3897454688374479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15539359766549496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15245201824945395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16382482063846446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529576257220374,0.2970945949687442,0.10494057830383273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11748396346505967,0.1619503439159474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900533767701593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807286971895488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037550576516782,0.14352925942509667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335334709972515,0.32867198075519155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329314212250602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15630479135638992,0.0,0.16310758781609175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3511647430725175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261712248474337,0.0,0.0,0.10397180945562047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16815764521978413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977769152271915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126868618030209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207468695714009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MendMySoul,2020/03/31,My best friend's son attempted suicide and he isn't allowed to visit his own son in the hospital because of COVID-19 concerns (the hospital has a ton of cases) I have no clue how to support someone through this?,4.932601626016262,6.414143073170735,5.569268292682928,79.47552845528456,69.48780487804879,8.393495934959349,40.495934959349604,8.841846274778883,3.912993495934959,170,11,30,3,3,55,36,41,0.14400000000000002,0.708,0.14800000000000002,0.0516,1,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,2,0,3,4,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,6,4,3,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,0,22,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654923867170421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4570572876202433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364860277979685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3690194600144132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4763943596505569,0.4942293331532096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway0963267,2020/03/31,"Suddenly having an urge to choke a close person to death I never would think about such thing, I've never been in fights and always avoided them, I hate it when people fight. I avoid conflicts as much as possible, you could say that I'm a peaceful person. But for the past 2 weeks I was really really mad, but I did not act on it, I've tried to stay calm and isolate myself from everyone, I felt as if nobody likes me, it went to the point of me having an urge to kill. I don't know what happened to me, I'm scared I don't want to be stupid. Maybe I just have nothing to do, so I started thinking unnecessary crap. Please help. (Fyi: im a 15F highschool student)",2.385770750988144,3.7411042173913054,3.924466403162057,89.27092885375498,75.66666666666667,6.757312252964428,22.69038208168643,7.348242739294969,0.7257884057971014,514,14,112,6,11,171,95,138,0.252,0.638,0.111,-0.9606,0,2,0,0,2,0,18.0,0,1,1,0,5,12,7,3,7,0,12,1,1,0,2,20,23,10,2,4,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,2,6,3,0,3,4,0,0,2,5,10,0,0,5,2,16,2,17,15,1,14,0,0,0,0,8,4,1,1,8,71,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998781697388827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392011782890082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17224277478874486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730744721378455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15940019462053046,0.0,0.0,0.17796593826200224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082210727511256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19470791183269867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994270687119576,0.0,0.09906423776194552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806420254806548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810918448531925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250924062652766,0.0,0.2780497929173766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17296093746204824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720751900489801,0.1249671348003275,0.3147859807505509,0.0,0.1978674659963977,0.1704006212475762,0.2032120776133632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23095381141582186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14334717406864114,0.1804681651127462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758645204279,0.19212940530570444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197543841785934,0.23100212566593264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238230579841107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631993195837557,0.0,0.144590861440373,0.0,0.0,0.1670995467942699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804901926020268,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gamingfartokids,2020/03/31,"Please stop me before I become a school shooter I see school shootings like columbine and parkland and think ""Wow, that must be fun!"" Of course I know this is wrong but I can't stop these thoughts. I want to stop this before this state gets progressively worse and I end up committing one",2.8496969696969683,5.559960545454548,2.145000000000003,96.01083333333334,79.9090909090909,5.121212121212121,21.89393939393939,6.42735559955562,0.21766666666666626,230,7,47,2,6,66,42,55,0.23600000000000002,0.655,0.109,-0.8553,0,0,0,2,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,2,13,10,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,1,7,3,3,7,0,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,5,25,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353365808599132,0.3626407289653672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887308165424749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132856222820016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710641090154116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410298329950796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439248718047207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23390427565498284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4313085141605032,0.16980183473801208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5344479377656884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653680913777658,0.0,0.16916636358332868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568355564256148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21715268635846516,0.0,0.2329759270293421,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway103784,2020/03/31,"Foniasophobia and a Fear of Myself Foniasophobia is the fear of serial killers, murder and being murdered. My father was a murder, which has led a lot of stress, anxiety and just fear. The thought of killing someone scares me, seeing pictures, videos of famous killers, gore that involves murder, or meeting people who have taken a life. I just I cant handle it. I am actually coming here though, because I began to watch things like criminal minds, forensic files in an attempt to expose myself to these things, but seeing how they identify these murderers. They all seem to follow a similar path. I began to question myself, and what is wrong with me. I am a sexual sadist, degrader, ith a death kink (knowing you have the power to kill someone or they have the power or kill you) I enjoy fighting, I am extremely charismatic, and have found myself lying and manipulating people to get my way. I have a large list of mental health issues from PTSD to paranoid personality disorder. I was physically and verbally abused as a child. All of these qualities and my lifes background well I think you get the point. I could never kill someone, but i am terrified of myself. I sit and wonder what is wrong with me that I enjoy hurting people, what is wrong with me that I lie and manipulate people. So yeah I guess that is the end of this. I just I need help, I don't know what to do. Should I be scared of myself?  Is there a name for being afraid of yourself? I already have a therapist and a psychiatrist, is there anything else you suggest I do? I'd just like to say thank you all in advance, if you are reading this, you must either care or be interested in my story. So thank you for reading and any help you offer. If you have questions ask in the comments and I can help. 

I would like to mention, I 100% feel human emotions, I have a partner who I am in love with. I got away from my abusive family and was adopted so I still hold my adoptive family close to my heart, I have many friends who I care a lot about. I still feel fear, remorse, joy, love, all of it.",3.856856203007517,5.610941749373435,5.154015507518796,80.31906837406021,72.60902255639098,7.594016290726818,27.25571741854637,8.278499904357787,1.9135093358396,1614,59,302,26,32,537,194,399,0.26,0.593,0.147,-0.9952,2,0,0,0,3,0,55.0,0,10,3,4,16,38,10,8,22,1,39,6,1,4,6,64,67,28,10,7,13,1,2,3,2,3,3,1,0,4,21,20,0,1,11,3,0,4,3,23,1,0,9,6,63,15,40,50,7,20,0,1,3,2,39,8,0,13,9,230,84,2,0.0,0.19010238401758253,0.07828612113295791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852812675589508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545544226290647,0.0,0.06137041104139233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601673187568365,0.0,0.07499771922216962,0.0,0.07537219302816721,0.0,0.0,0.048903224582069936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16358548511573634,0.0,0.0,0.06910505118096465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06405157487271326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09194256156125463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670160614077978,0.090240129657729,0.07105380779403854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512542972646308,0.3610929228766032,0.08112636555129732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879604298214485,0.061980126773542636,0.0,0.08382646149118878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06416169885207372,0.0,0.08837473021658393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527334709884384,0.0,0.09506469643735292,0.16131545124798705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588043055936953,0.0,0.0,0.08373201801107166,0.0,0.0,0.3550196599598557,0.0,0.08817697675541132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133278205311209,0.11757878498582973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640553077098744,0.1448088632818862,0.0,0.0,0.08133357771093366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084596227467718,0.0,0.08100240800984174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05948437252473871,0.061872959104169824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22246623785585207,0.0700476699126059,0.0,0.0,0.07583670938326761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377644841239446,0.0,0.17973634411696507,0.0,0.1604895121196182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379658654507894,0.16063452926855526,0.0,0.12785476319745054,0.07303204862503053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20391818106037568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813245722882788,0.0,0.09189522879378066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14771720593997595,0.0,0.09314514025167912,0.10659325492868,0.05140368897362098,0.07881873593456085,0.06368813797062722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636773202871194,0.0,0.0,0.0721301532616933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699847191269929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056988150567476616,0.26313392337899344,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cig_palace,2020/03/31,Help. Just looking for someone to talk to I just need someone to talk to. I’m scared I’m gonna slip into the abyss,-2.5261538461538464,-1.137335153846152,0.05338461538461559,103.9416153846154,112.07692307692308,2.08,16.73846153846154,3.1291,-1.2759446153846152,90,3,22,0,5,30,17,26,0.113,0.7809999999999999,0.105,-0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,6,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,10,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346102600825201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939276832688157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595345455300632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504299346253653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5931396791071636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5626637935178127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1205fgh5,2020/03/31,"Step-mother (51f) gone off the deep end My step mother has been going through a gradual decline in her mental condition for the last 6-8 months. Delusions of all caliber, severe paranoia, she's seeing and hear things that aren't there. This last 10 days she's been experiencing pretty bad insomnia and shes urinating in the bed pre-sleep without realising.

There is no way for this woman to willingly receive a diagnosis from a professional. I have no idea what's wrong with her, theres potentially a family history of bipolar. If anyone knows what is wrong with her please put your two cents in, I would really appreciate it.",5.359230769230769,7.251840307692309,6.423589743589744,72.16307692307693,69.0,9.986324786324786,30.09401709401709,10.25414643259724,3.3995401709401705,504,20,87,14,9,168,87,117,0.157,0.772,0.071,-0.8484,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,7,0,10,3,1,0,1,10,15,3,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,1,1,7,4,0,0,2,0,1,5,4,3,0,1,3,3,10,0,14,10,1,16,0,0,1,0,11,5,0,1,5,57,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827698638315405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651196632908389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12753754498261244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751548835777908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18642863521699773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112390424411355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22288763003939754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22324470222551604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086826208005945,0.322398316414986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929354315538356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784854280635718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170788900363582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011909735447336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19880140347842606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668883380940893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157587516123199,0.0,0.0,0.22341024182888647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979008108494892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13138162286340668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19318082320725796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697108948426927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19063164765591076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048160384160935,0.4324346402228221,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vaultboy26,2020/03/31,"Bad mood is kicking in again Well for me its a bad mood, for others it would probably be a reason to contact a psychologist heh.

Basically I have this feeling that everyone wants to hurt me. Yesterday my girlfriend was online on fb whole day but left my 6 messages unread, and then she wrote that she was feeling sick. Im pretty sure im not her dream partner and in dating me, She lost opportunity to date someone better looking/just overall nicer. Its a bit hard to live with a visions of being dumped. 

My other ""friends"" are either people from school that dont give a shit about me but they would pretend I was someone only when I would kill myself, so yeah.

Those who i know from internet only chat with me once a week, probably because im a douchebag. 

My family tries to look like they care about me but im pretty sure they would feel 100 times better if i would live alone far away (im 17yrs old).

This is just so shitty because i cant tell if im paranoid or are these people really  that evil towards Me.

Staying home is quite fun, but every day makes me more and more sad in here. 

Whats your diagnose doctor?",2.9472814849624065,4.7627259508928566,4.179323308270678,86.09725563909777,75.20535714285714,6.6800751879699245,24.735902255639097,7.475848149327749,1.1708875,879,29,175,11,19,288,140,224,0.21100000000000002,0.588,0.201,-0.5820000000000001,0,1,0,0,0,1,22.0,0,1,3,5,9,22,4,0,8,2,18,4,1,2,2,30,29,14,1,8,10,0,4,1,3,5,3,0,1,1,15,5,0,0,5,3,0,0,3,9,1,0,5,5,27,11,20,17,5,20,0,3,1,0,18,8,1,3,12,111,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410538024912944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536761392765263,0.0,0.1517315475751264,0.11077697034446904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16071968474549753,0.09919750825816306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09263961931099143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171966359939745,0.0,0.0,0.09222277314993066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09300086087211218,0.0,0.0,0.10648930529518283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655495111671792,0.08682230488673691,0.0,0.0,0.0856563802579023,0.0,0.13782730690512005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019956990787607,0.0,0.0,0.08716287901452813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139428933985704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114175307735614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972693926683682,0.0,0.5888777525466261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005250744689538,0.0,0.04993524671725075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872156742882868,0.0,0.0,0.044390466030364464,0.0,0.1604651964016584,0.0,0.07630099376384934,0.0,0.09918634373104784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060650929942063066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534413188060248,0.09676480833711908,0.0,0.1382089247987104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259842067890905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18487814937170133,0.19592868892630075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664266550010728,0.0,0.0,0.058208369709824015,0.09342102165159018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195695137460716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326829028929066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15397374773731914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968465459617604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17127226582966834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941718259592974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052982222587827095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061689170299327065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05359261983179801,0.0,0.07288382268114922,0.0,0.08169563374500075,0.0,0.0,0.10144390949193903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3227279345764301,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LeatherResident,2020/03/31,"Manic mistake might have ruined my life... 
So yea I’m very manic (bipolar 1) and thought it would be a good idea to snort meth topless on a celebrity’s Instagram live story.... now my insta is flooding with pervs and ppl are sending me nude photos of myself..... fuck

Fun update: people are threatening to send the videos to my school and my parents (I’m 20)...I literally hate my fucking brain for thinking this was a good idea. What would u do/what’s the worst thing you’ve done in a state of fucked mental health",1.4784323432343245,4.028630564356437,2.7637871287128704,90.2386179867987,84.94059405940595,4.950825082508251,21.287953795379536,6.42735559955562,0.4426627062706272,401,13,78,4,12,129,78,101,0.218,0.701,0.081,-0.9477,1,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,2,10,4,0,6,1,10,8,2,0,0,12,18,4,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,1,0,2,0,7,0,0,3,1,7,3,9,11,1,7,0,1,0,4,3,2,3,1,2,42,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026662628289148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18578540159158885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5035112559353715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045456741476679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17923987296823204,0.0,0.19297575212583848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4098884641300857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12823186932269254,0.0,0.0,0.16030914487334044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829564677250076,0.1925924584474629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015862297199001,0.0,0.0,0.12586168783511026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18373504748186334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061162274749125,0.11632785482466038,0.0,0.1441278751745233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14979511786925098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579312667361789,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carlsaline,2020/03/31,"Stop right there and read this post because I need to tell you that you are wonderful and amazing and yes it is hard to live with the problems that you have right now or the tough situation that you might be in but those things are what make you different, strong and amazing because you’re getting through it and if you think otherwise it’s time to take that mindset and throw it in the trash because you don’t need that negativity in your life. Your mental health does not define you. You are worthy of love and happiness. You are doing wonderful. Keep going. If you think no ones rooting for you you’re wrong because this post is an official root for you!",3.816931818181821,5.910924500000004,3.8825568181818175,87.95221590909092,73.53125,7.154545454545455,26.48011363636364,8.00094639256281,1.5227875000000006,528,19,105,8,11,162,77,128,0.10800000000000001,0.667,0.225,0.9746,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,15,0,1,2,8,0,0,4,1,11,3,0,3,0,26,23,11,0,5,5,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,14,8,0,2,4,1,0,2,4,3,0,1,0,1,16,5,11,21,0,12,0,0,0,1,17,5,0,6,3,73,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3869445160270712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16579757948499296,0.0,0.0,0.13887094380018278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08290912779569162,0.0,0.09018734988226916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16892876651712144,0.14215533155511542,0.0,0.0,0.1686803595527542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14105122278211124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208764616897897,0.0,0.0,0.1401264350517796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322418408474416,0.0,0.10592700206571024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599224898381624,0.1683453220427538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353336813110492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753264870020107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30396286710389625,0.0,0.0,0.15184517771632602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15873323570496006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27104128435588776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17837453691129151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267218967441574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931535022692705,0.0,0.13870230964187893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542677858315186,0.2033646627792776,0.0,0.0,0.09253358533608293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3441857044913221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17350292252766236,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayiguess27431,2020/03/31,I really hate myself Not looking for backlash just need to get this off my chest .  I am starting to hate myself more and more every day . I’ve hit a huge spike and I don’t think I can rebound,0.8118292682926835,2.680871097560974,2.797743902439024,93.26051829268292,81.92682926829268,5.0756097560975615,20.006097560975608,5.985473137389443,-0.05583414634146333,149,4,33,1,4,50,32,41,0.193,0.7509999999999999,0.055999999999999994,-0.7708,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,6,11,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,7,0,4,10,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298196742975404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30024469187686925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618092515791645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7036541227326389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992486838323256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642329238782937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282903166058512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522301004942013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283380736676929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DemoniCripple,2020/03/31,"I wish there was some twitter/hotline for mental disorders like OCD etc. Cause right now like at this very moment I'm having a ritual and I feel anxious. 

I wish there was some kind of ""twitter"" but all tweets would be about one's mental disorders and status just giving updates and venting.",7.689939393939397,7.494531327272727,7.221818181818183,75.939393939394,63.0,9.515151515151514,32.878787878787875,8.841846274778883,2.7541515151515146,233,8,40,3,3,73,42,55,0.027999999999999997,0.7809999999999999,0.191,0.7783,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,1,13,10,4,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,3,3,4,6,4,5,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,5,27,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317138699529375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21070260803333846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4701435048290718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22874984676819174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10370886232302977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19675846294274787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135886142008232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004109998246152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4134016217263305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898661597307996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17516127128351713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16923573521028035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4717285860522549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570297143434674,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AndromedaGLXY,2020/03/31,"My Dog Just Died Not Even a Day Ago and I'm Having a Hard Time Coping I'm 16 yrs old and I've experienced losing a pet before. I had a gerbil named Rosanna who suddenly died and it was equally as devastating (I was 7). But this is totally different. My dog, Jambi, was almost only two years old when he got ran over by a car. I was so desperate to save him, I even tried giving him cpr (his intestines were crushed so it wouldn't have worked anyway). This is grief on a level of a loved one dying. I know that mourning takes time but I just wanna move on. In a couple months we're getting some of his puppies anyways (he was bred) but I just can't move on.",-0.16212441811256895,2.0272585683453244,2.370046550994502,92.63372407955991,89.2158273381295,4.997206940330089,18.248413034278453,6.522977012572876,-0.0011315277190013795,507,14,112,6,17,174,94,139,0.138,0.813,0.049,-0.8322,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,10,5,0,0,8,0,13,2,1,0,1,18,22,10,5,2,7,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,4,3,3,0,2,9,2,13,2,11,12,3,20,0,3,0,1,10,6,0,2,10,73,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14658438266276935,0.0,0.1655872263148158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071179160718422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182971089882314,0.0,0.1066454989455973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5148622724822647,0.17276921069913728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184414941484536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639537810811095,0.15863132321506224,0.0,0.0,0.132255951969685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813282863200358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087921775171946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18499897525787729,0.0,0.0,0.1492466253983457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13199122350766934,0.35150954347260155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34704144635907325,0.0,0.1120542947492364,0.12576606503151516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124332447717448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928490699482541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122706686982022,0.0,0.16153568959217424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038628322927256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648839438139862
mentalhealth,liverpoolla,2020/03/31,Wim hof breathing method for anxiety? Does it work? and if so what are peoples experiences please. Wim hof breathing method for anxiety? Does it work? and if so what are peoples experiences please. How long it takes to calm the fight and flight response etc. (Long term state) feel like I'm in constant state of fight and flight.,2.8084999999999987,5.831577183333337,2.2816666666666663,92.0625,85.5,5.666666666666668,24.16666666666667,7.1686216300943375,1.105666666666668,261,10,50,4,8,76,36,60,0.12300000000000001,0.7290000000000001,0.14800000000000002,0.4137,0,0,2,0,2,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,3,4,2,0,1,0,2,2,2,1,0,8,5,9,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,5,5,2,7,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,5,23,5,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30473275419637585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21523465832572114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485943018295465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221299277041335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896577434970312,0.0,0.0,0.10070757386533853,0.14228883621550115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730559720826253,0.0,0.0,0.3525226967062805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27616219374755324,0.0,0.0,0.4372630737525029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975289312410045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899998276718714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Princess_Meimei,2020/03/31,Medical Staffs Do you any website that supports Mental Health for medical staffs?,9.706923076923076,12.679395076923079,7.633846153846152,63.48615384615386,59.769230769230774,11.353846153846154,43.769230769230774,11.20814326018867,6.253984615384617,68,4,8,2,1,20,11,13,0.0,0.828,0.172,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411070862191736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.376871521323824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7143463988910562,0.35730438445237445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4023406872694539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YetiToes_,2020/03/31,"Why does everything always go wrong? I’m a 17 year old guy and I just feel so hopeless right now. I made this account to post this because I didn’t know where else to talk about this. But everything in my life just has been a downward spiral. A bunch of little and big things have just been going wrong. I feel alone and just broken and I don’t know what to do. Like a relationship I had for awhile just ended and I have no one to talk too. I also got fired from my job and I’ve just been trying to help my parents out and i dont know anymore. I don’t think I can keep going like this. Where, if there even is one, is the light at the end of the tunnel",0.08685446009389608,2.025924211267608,1.813267605633804,98.92351643192491,85.05633802816901,4.631737089201878,15.804694835680753,5.6839178017228535,-0.8937930516431924,506,9,123,3,15,165,85,142,0.15,0.795,0.055,-0.9227,2,1,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,0,15,5,0,0,7,0,15,1,0,1,0,24,28,11,0,1,8,1,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,8,0,1,6,0,1,3,5,3,0,2,7,4,14,2,13,21,1,18,0,1,0,0,6,9,0,1,7,82,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591621166519,0.0,0.1203884608086762,0.1252630846162852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492973086375077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176906522311457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13174040381854502,0.0,0.17643421683784505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12575860514080106,0.0,0.2666712298637454,0.0,0.0,0.09943163545976724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705950600568322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15223721534143705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566696293915208,0.0,0.1204022674803454,0.0,0.0,0.1490603445060076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090519451826624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14938980252771936,0.13380873305759464,0.0,0.0,0.2482019989540092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10633233537044658,0.14709452911584744,0.15088273030659216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14244657240578187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15796860719307632,0.0,0.20402244235951655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16715918357783022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14417771551883596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162587367588707,0.0,0.12856212853251572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24200007072721635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001348016916464,0.09646129731613803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220820221305901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584082747348436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3291883017714736,0.0,0.09694417493437672
mentalhealth,Cumzyk,2020/03/31,"My Predicament I love my girl friend and shes has some serious mental health issues that i'm not sure i know how to address them. I know she has to want help but I know she needs it, she has mood swings which send her into  a depressive state where she things her life is worthless and to numb the pain she hurts herself. She tries to push me away during these episodes too because she thinks shes undeserving of my love which makes it hard to talk to her. Her family is against mental health treatments at all and i have a feeling they might be abusive. Her ex- boyfriend was abusive aswell which causes her to not trust me sometimes even though i'm the only person she talks to about these matters, which makes me worry if telling someone might make her hurt herself worse because she thinks I betrayed her.  I'm really not sure what to do I need some advice she means so much to me it's just hard because I don't know who to turn to if she doesn't want help.",5.985398313027183,5.737885618556702,5.338697282099346,88.19903936269917,66.52577319587628,8.085473289597003,29.49203373945642,6.980632752743323,1.3627175257731958,766,23,163,5,11,231,110,194,0.27399999999999997,0.635,0.091,-0.9935,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,0,9,14,0,0,4,0,15,7,0,5,3,36,36,9,0,6,7,1,3,0,1,2,5,0,1,2,13,4,0,0,8,0,0,2,5,7,0,0,1,3,40,6,18,32,4,7,0,4,0,2,38,4,0,6,0,108,53,0,0.0,0.2741805551702639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130645747586724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870768315536657,0.0,0.0,0.21159618804603572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885984340953615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965565486666654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07642137715767879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907540010668396,0.0,0.0585034008404208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939259576419363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072960507883486,0.0,0.0,0.2459758068749435,0.0,0.0,0.1551078566050455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477269735539077,0.0,0.0,0.12076487784434525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543514913289889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172513172318999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20885469024170789,0.0,0.2316998837805547,0.0,0.0,0.12603553684871424,0.0,0.0,0.2332047642042725,0.2454872430488156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505572679320647,0.17158604682494874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799807863316264,0.12311717569904967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102823867398393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412292226849145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803559343627703,0.0,0.11443417918689812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180992340127042,0.0,0.0,0.18599692735329404,0.10113036461399444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768685725978267,0.14827685674140134,0.11367855741544808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855539671871314,0.1258526878753099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649039180311334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750299210092215,0.1179122244379298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thecatsandthehound,2020/03/31,"Tried to report someone telling me 17m to kill myself in pms by making a post hoping mods see it, instead of support I have people telling me to kill mused and that they hope I’m dead by the morning. I have severe depression and pst attempts on my life. I don’t know what to say I’m honestly crying, I’m angry, and I don’t understand how people can be this evil


https://www.reddit.com/r/NHLHUT/comments/fs7nlk/mods_id_appreciate_if_you_would_suspend_this_guy/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=ios_app",11.912692307692303,14.189459756410258,8.496564102564104,61.93176923076926,54.0,8.291282051282051,29.70256410256411,8.238735603445708,2.0393456410256405,423,11,60,4,5,119,57,78,0.32299999999999995,0.561,0.11599999999999999,-0.9728,0,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,1,1,2,8,3,0,2,0,6,2,0,2,0,9,16,4,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,9,4,9,15,0,3,0,1,1,0,4,2,0,2,0,35,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2158359606356133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188147293974402,0.0,0.0,0.17157292875896166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3957063073752571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4407763798107997,0.0,0.10947655293598696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407027049465483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329692988204519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762040360337193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19078104977042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584139225687162,0.0,0.0,0.15873870103450546,0.0,0.0,0.22504226513727896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16878373747068753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22605277785075656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3482237483964081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13524550616705586,0.0,0.0,0.2073769575697553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xxihostile,2020/03/31,"Anyone else ever think to themselves 'we as humans only ever get one life, why the fuck is this the one that I got'? I know that there's always people worse off, individuals with far worse or more difficult lives than mine. But man, sometimes I just get this overwhelming feeling of why the fuck did this have to be the life I was given? It all seems so unfair sometimes. 

I'm a 24 year old physically disabled guy with a disease that  gradually gets worse and worse as I age until it will eventually kill me. Got a nice dose of social anxiety and depression to go with it. Very few friends, never had a girlfriend. Still live with my parents who I constantly feel like a burden to, even though I know I shouldn't. Spend most of my time at home so this lockdown shit makes a minor difference to my regular life. 

I just sometimes can't believe I rolled the dice of life and got given this shit.",5.472202597402596,5.993224708571433,5.988259740259736,80.46555844155844,67.62857142857143,8.877922077922078,29.051948051948052,8.841846274778883,2.1272857142857133,704,23,138,11,11,228,112,175,0.243,0.705,0.052000000000000005,-0.9899,1,1,0,0,0,1,15.0,1,0,0,0,10,12,5,1,11,0,9,9,2,1,4,25,28,11,1,1,4,1,2,1,2,2,5,0,1,3,12,8,0,0,6,0,1,1,3,9,0,2,8,2,16,3,19,17,4,14,0,2,0,2,9,3,4,3,11,89,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982122500313246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08257977878334287,0.0,0.0,0.07547961829752596,0.11060528749056822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162021552143652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665323288216335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297529012459872,0.0,0.0,0.11278248538283585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017654325720983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129851007916252,0.1952899476003625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916331188012113,0.07711793665897393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834002098253924,0.1995920208263152,0.16919482520975454,0.0,0.06134922778371678,0.0,0.2590071733751665,0.0,0.0,0.10688530291212307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828045443128533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942825738713415,0.0,0.11865058601831115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049869209168662,0.05273784705572649,0.0,0.19063978692652386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205600105401379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325600543960841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327306726946178,0.0,0.14629645882503114,0.08209917342143919,0.0,0.0,0.11986326766163807,0.0,0.0,0.07483741919419452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827163151118004,0.0,0.0,0.2216137503517589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003919757305083,0.0,0.0,0.3202894313716748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620726008976957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916859757100753,0.10605817472965524,0.0,0.0629452357990111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906824802724206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948122156896216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4400321603835155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695148500948828
mentalhealth,trustlove11,2020/03/31,"Never had therapy or medication; afraid of medical mistreatment. Now suicidal I'm (26f) autistic and schizophrenic. I was once involuntarily detained in a high security mental ward and strongly medicated for two weeks. It was not rehabilitative for me and I spent a year bedridden at my parent's upon discharge, and two years building up my abilities gradually before I, against all odds, bounced back, and was able to move out, and become a functioning member of society again. 

All without the use of medications, aside for that which was forced on me in the ward, which had adverse affects. I was cooperative with western medicine, and am still convinced that I require a strong western medical form of support for my conditions, but the detainment fucked me up so incredibly badly, that I have resisted the long trek of seeking proper treatment again, and I now have fallen through the cracks.

I managed 4 years without psychoses, and 2 years of being a functioning adult again before alas, this pandemic hit.

My partner (first friend and companion in 5 years), who, although I have been with him 1 year, does not know about my conditions in depth, just broke up with me, and now I am forced into absolutely zero human interaction for the remainder of the self isolation period. I have no supports in the form of friends, family, medication, and therapy, and the emotional pressures became too much for my partner to continue seeing me. 

I cannot come to terms with the seemingly inhumane act of him abandoning me during this time, but have to accept his limits. I am now a vegetable at serious risk of self harm and suicide. 

What do I do.",9.537835051546393,9.224333505154641,9.49352577319588,61.55224742268042,59.30927835051546,13.120824742268045,42.76769759450171,12.340626583579946,5.677923986254298,1314,68,206,39,15,432,169,291,0.188,0.727,0.085,-0.9893,1,1,0,0,0,1,40.0,0,0,0,5,13,19,1,3,16,0,20,9,0,2,3,40,31,19,2,0,8,1,0,0,5,0,7,0,0,6,10,21,1,4,3,0,1,4,7,10,0,4,9,1,29,9,43,20,6,43,0,2,1,1,15,16,1,2,23,161,39,2,0.09794949751685753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531711752880674,0.08178373907333149,0.0,0.10817752450618216,0.16669561613093475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437481906954074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571626534701775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018000106452563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923380689768531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331579255031503,0.0,0.0,0.1513510776145802,0.0905527321171593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034890219271446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05383048223460613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668222301148537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5920428836307546,0.0987100555293096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410481462819578,0.072004150888521,0.0,0.07554469087998364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431301812967468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876132545094848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805306795674151,0.08916954381349516,0.20436537580346126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822259524348643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142817048733784,0.22230385805613906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22402757358776015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05711513969107305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913648529106505,0.0,0.0,0.08459691691752379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856917868541158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888396405405613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3784575900026045
mentalhealth,Silentstrike205,2020/03/31,"I am not sure if this would be considered a mental health problem, but I need to vent... I like to draw, and everything that I draw, I show to someone, whether they be my friends or family. Ever time I draw, the only thing I see went I am done are the mistakes I made. I fix them, but still, there are more, so I show my drawings to others to see what they think. They say it looks cool or they like it, but when I walk away my mind says, they didn't like it, it's horrible, they only said that so you would be happy. No matter how hard I try my mind kills most of the drawings I have, and I try to get better, but I look at other artists that are better, I strive to be like them, but in the back of my mind I think, 'I'll never reach that high,' I don't think that I have anxiety or depression or any others, but I want validation from other people, people that don't see the mistakes that my mind picks out, it's like I have to have someone say that a drawing is cool for me to even be able to think it's cool. I don't know if any of that made sense, but thanks, I guess.",2.889841954022991,2.9924247370689656,4.174758620689655,92.67943678160921,73.18103448275863,7.3935632183908035,22.79425287356321,7.0316486544052195,0.3980956321839075,817,17,202,7,15,270,109,232,0.127,0.6809999999999999,0.192,0.9553,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,8,2,9,19,1,0,7,3,22,1,0,4,3,44,41,20,1,9,15,0,1,5,1,2,1,4,0,0,22,3,0,0,5,3,0,2,7,5,0,0,6,13,40,14,19,28,2,13,0,1,5,0,14,5,0,8,11,140,62,0,0.107496095225993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14620206190369892,0.0,0.08223421861813328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099612001989004,0.08265786189082296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901431212997415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258622930257644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100058272632907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100015707694883,0.0972363723995066,0.0,0.0,0.09661055900088916,0.0,0.10133775167158776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305121651600864,0.0,0.05616227301786828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841906810836693,0.0,0.0,0.11443159224983808,0.09629538693758706,0.0,0.0,0.11426332248119797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357552655143137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892850249602854,0.0,0.059077042670448124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26258581144958665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18053929281287814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034308088993622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083307806363737,0.0,0.4341616499445517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970699253199698,0.08290761556234945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351124875787346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904851481810066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285924546650684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225340291803396,0.2564556285031357,0.0,0.0,0.2569814109862513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821621852939396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08584652050584499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10131379758646684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896796192822277,0.0,0.0,0.07141562913039122,0.27551662927492576,0.0,0.0,0.06268183758697507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14596558485887595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06340398209208145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964995723178877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15272428366980176,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kwaqs,2020/03/31,"I am afraid the psychiatric hospitals are over burndened due to this pandemic going on but I can’t stop thinking of ways to try and kill myself I just don’t have an effective way to do it in my home and I’m afraid to leave. This is really a change for me that has been coming on and it’s getting worse I really think I might do it one of these nights now that I am alone and awake all the time in isolation. I think I will get through tonight and I am afraid of being a burden on the hospital if I saw something that will lead to me spending time in the ER or being admitted.

Any advice? At least I am asking advice I am just concerned these thoughts are serious and might nights are progressively more and more full of depressed, anger towards myself violent towards myself thoughts and I am not getting much rest at all.",4.071305220883538,5.260973379518077,4.874879518072291,84.7507931726908,71.22891566265059,8.424899598393575,28.29116465863454,8.841846274778883,2.091969477911647,655,24,133,12,12,212,95,166,0.22899999999999998,0.74,0.032,-0.9896,0,2,1,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,3,3,9,3,3,7,0,23,0,0,2,2,28,37,11,1,1,6,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,10,9,0,1,7,0,1,3,3,9,1,1,4,1,19,0,22,27,8,25,0,1,1,0,2,12,0,4,8,105,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.314912794493848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668842331442042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10957533536135164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063673739125075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17045636829912647,0.13880101361907474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13878281870409304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525545736000189,0.0,0.09157507059922626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162860751921462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17826876550632256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17061560008827195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418713327587309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845061403770685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30242307098631105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091872630618088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064506644759701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12404734229864353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347136283730314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30974077920646664,0.0,0.2558417352932824,0.1879148155703213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10939810084663733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557982795571173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16420734868542952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bobdolerimjob,2020/03/31,"Whoever said that if you text 741-741 and say “HOME” you’ll immediately get a response from a counselor, they are lying Hour 2 down and no response other than the automated response",15.795294117647051,8.577753823529411,14.675882352941176,50.401470588235334,54.88235294117648,17.129411764705885,54.58823529411765,13.023866798666859,6.783035294117648,146,7,25,3,1,49,28,34,0.172,0.828,0.0,-0.6808,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26850339942379625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5155063708936186,0.0,0.5061103377516394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4888581749069912,0.4086919584644202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,illexotic,2020/03/31,"Are you having a rough time right now? Then [this positivity video](https://youtu.be/8qgACjrm0XI) is just for you. I hope you have an amazing day, because you ARE amazing!

Believe in yourself, fam!
I love you.

🖤💜🧡💛💚💙❤💙💚💛🧡💜🖤",-0.454202127659574,1.6816415319148952,2.016143617021278,91.07187500000003,101.76595744680849,4.052127659574468,20.768617021276604,5.985473137389443,0.14900212765957432,180,7,39,2,8,61,34,47,0.0,0.5920000000000001,0.408,0.9617,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,5,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,0,0,2,7,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,4,2,7,0,6,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,1,4,20,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746218447652798,0.0,0.0,0.5075614965221923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29053652827721704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4474501470078416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4065956540973716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3847262562685198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262691345711825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,staystrong355,2020/03/31,"Coronavirus questions. 1. Will this be as bad as the Spanish flu and cause millions to die? 

2. Even though some young people are dying, the chances of dying if you are healthy and below 50 are still relatively low? Obviously no one wants to get it, but if you're under 50 and get it the odds are still pretty good for you correct? 

3. Is the transmission rate more of a worry as oppose to the lethality of the virus? Many people are recovering from it also.",2.460287141073657,4.85875934831461,3.9116104868913872,84.63148564294633,79.1123595505618,6.652184769038702,23.372034956304606,7.793537801064563,1.2965121098626722,358,12,69,6,9,118,62,89,0.14400000000000002,0.746,0.11,-0.3564,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,0,7,0,8,1,0,1,2,13,11,11,4,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,2,1,13,9,2,6,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,4,3,50,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16021987960322384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16728394087516965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058147121525149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6237952283171311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232933252160525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20934928617963694,0.0,0.0,0.1680441342292824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031235260718927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357623933872972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777950259721234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20382804962358667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244379320805482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199996514241219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968429277814147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11817166292130565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20346522258980407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vanitystar,2020/03/31,"What is wrong with me I’m an emotional person but I feel like I don’t actually love anyone? I love my family but sometimes i catch myself not caring about them. Isn’t caring a part of love? Same thing with friends, I have a feeling I love them but again I wouldn’t feel sad if something happens to them (wether it’s good or bad). I don’t know what has happened to me. I was discharged from the mental hospital a month ago and everything has changed. I stopped taking the meds they prescribed me because they made me gain weight (stupid reason ik) I wasn’t always like this, I think I was a caring person now Im so selfish. I don’t think high of myself either, I’m just so lost. I’m not numb so why do I feel like This?",0.3255702722590144,2.595123635761592,2.0604746136865337,95.23153605592348,87.476821192053,4.680058866813834,18.984915378955115,6.139981653823899,-0.14264267844002898,563,16,124,5,18,184,87,151,0.157,0.555,0.287,0.9784,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,5,2,7,19,1,0,7,0,13,6,0,2,0,24,35,9,0,2,9,0,5,3,1,1,1,0,0,2,6,3,1,1,8,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,5,5,27,12,8,29,3,7,0,2,0,4,12,1,0,2,8,78,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.12158778063941528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104468888373031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367390248590952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712046163675098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403250510061232,0.07595260126563537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3811019589206139,0.0,0.1318061098484163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015379649557289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197890406194604,0.0,0.11745807590432845,0.0,0.2519980450167301,0.17802289926057424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626260630981803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450526308667747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22035976743632266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164257740575427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134585124791119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847473570043952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18261402289207893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601131702689975,0.0,0.44981123214568464,0.11789580387779408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839813366611525,0.0,0.12556352242744573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994513857850003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492539038044327,0.0,0.0,0.2175849461022926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810550036288815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959201336304834,0.12322868852039667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041678845829634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368073039206906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277608540534373,0.15967224760993112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15172443380398673,0.0,0.0,0.11242856380418688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362262313829408,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RealHoorayed,2020/03/31,"Idk if im ok or just making it up Well first I’m 14(M) but I feel like I’m not good at anything I try and do things but then I think I’m bad so I just stop. I don’t think I’m special I’m just some person that has no role in this world. Ive think of killing myself a lot I mainly self harm whenever I get mad. I have ambitions but I just don’t think ill let myself live that long and it messes with me. Once I get thinking like that its takes a bit for me to stop. I honestly don’t know if I have a mental health problem or I just want me to. I know its not good to self diagnose but I just want to know if I’m ok. I want to try and get help but idk if I could work myself up to talk to my mom. Idk what would happen even though I know my mother loves me and would do anything for me. I just get paranoia that she wouldn’t want to help me and I don’t want people to think I’m just trying to get attention. I just don’t think I have it bad in life so I guess maybe I want my life to be bad and not be all happy. But I don’t know what to do and sometimes I just cant take living even though I know its probably best to stay alive even. Ive thought of so many ways of ending it. I just want some help but I don’t know how to ask because idk if I could get myself to. 

Any advice would be great. Thanks.",-0.994197820978421,0.5928569867549669,1.4550502029480905,101.98203482161934,86.74834437086093,4.691476180303353,15.039948728904081,5.642373280135919,-1.108896731467635,998,16,271,6,31,339,120,302,0.191,0.618,0.191,-0.6187,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,3,21,22,2,0,3,2,27,6,0,2,1,76,71,28,1,19,28,2,1,2,0,4,5,0,0,3,15,8,0,2,17,0,0,0,13,8,1,1,1,1,46,14,26,60,7,14,0,0,0,1,13,6,0,11,8,169,61,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043220787672233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05597350317957928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13546794461281106,0.0,0.07694857489164993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20617579610466585,0.05017530503893265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637908269307369,0.0,0.08986101028901952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13143539449301445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354273925248387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290207365079793,0.0,0.0,0.16309458838610313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041618320397309116,0.05880215506427903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700126946659897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580209165100852,0.0,0.0,0.13807515124357966,0.0,0.09074687208304673,0.09067355137101243,0.0,0.07278630596703671,0.08762033871806267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749149445543923,0.0,0.0,0.16551162102362574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890873488953867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106362558674204,0.0,0.31664728867542274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416737220560447,0.1162757264606072,0.0804248452351765,0.0,0.14536216602691093,0.07284160453742697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997686935700748,0.07428783019528844,0.0,0.054942446995525536,0.08344924299838666,0.08269128189584983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294894361189525,0.0,0.0,0.09640027164670018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765727678327352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057063268530219376,0.07186976390959902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874391222458743,0.07875938585546016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17173419610438395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140652108061543,0.0,0.0,0.0877313212392066,0.0,0.1376293977326965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377348886979572,0.06615751908695999,0.0,0.0757798277197308,0.0,0.0,0.05468298999551216,0.3691856840717306,0.16173796930968262,0.06534480655104871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16764890361646953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33983926942107306,0.0653337074757943,0.0,0.0,0.07400641723199095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05992253253638544,0.0,0.0,0.17541161320737172,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Enscausasu1,2020/03/31,"2 weeks working at home, I'm about to break... I miss the walk to and from work, I miss the office banter, now I'm planted in one spot at my table on my own for 9 hours listening to people complain and sorting crap out, I even have to take 3 allocated/timed breaks IN MY OWN HOME, whereas before it didn't seem a chore, now it's a tedious bag of shite, I'm losing interest and it's beginning to show rapidly. I know I'm lucky enough to be a key worker and still have a job, but fuck me there's no separation between home and work now and I can't escape. How are other home workers coping with it?",4.786607142857143,3.8956015000000015,6.19924107142857,83.18593750000002,69.15625,8.876785714285715,29.223214285714285,7.957251820313856,1.6999495535714284,464,14,104,5,7,159,84,128,0.147,0.8190000000000001,0.033,-0.8854,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,6,8,8,2,0,6,0,6,2,1,1,0,14,18,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,5,8,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,6,0,1,1,1,9,2,18,16,3,16,0,3,0,1,2,6,2,3,7,63,14,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15264712547036327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853571538884438,0.0,0.11848497479976006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658425648136413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7197685842440597,0.0,0.17666237598737392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780162511256293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858769614363228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006907983014837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155886720446285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436598909932466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16330932820623448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432605678288626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487846704237166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389531716868864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39179275321098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mushwar,2020/03/31,"1mm away from a complete meltdown. [Vent] Hey, I just have to write this down and ""say it out loud"" 

Recently I've been struggling AF. 

I have an SO of 6 years whom I love. She's been struggling to with diagnosed clinical depression and anxiety since 3 years back. She's been able to get through an education and 1 year ago landed a entry-level job at 70% salary, 70% of an already laughable salary.. 

It's nice to finally have one more person to help pay the bills but it's just not enough. I'm still on my knees trying to get money left over each month. I'm soon 30 years old and I cannot see that we'll be able to purchase our own apartment any time soon. 

She's been talking about kids for a while now and I simply just cannot fathom how I'm supposed to break it to her that I cannot see a future where we have children. I'm not sure she'll make it, what happens if she gets one of her episodes when I'm away working? Where would we get the money to support a child? 

I wouldn't change a thing if I could go back 6 years to the day we met. It just feels like we haven't gotten anywhere in s.i.x years. 

I got her 2 pets to ease her mind when I'm not at home. 1 died recently so we had to get another. The newest one is a demon which goes wild at night so now I'm sleep deprived, as I'm writing this I got 3h hours of sleep last night. She gets to sleep in since she works afternoons and evenings. I don't know how I can say to her that I want the pets gone, they ruin our furnitures and simple perform sleep torture on me. 

To this she asks if I would be the same against a baby: that this is good training for it. Whenever she says stuff like this I just feel dead inside and my heart breaks. I'm afraid that she mistakes the thought of a baby with a cure to her depression.

I recently changed career to get an increase in salary but I loathe it, but I've been taught my whole life to get up at 6, go to work, shut up, get paid, pay the bills. Rince and repeat. 


All of this causes my to lose hope of the future. We're so far behind that I'm not even sure we'll have it better in 10 years. I see my life slipping away, I'm just walking around like a zombie trying to make it, I've trained on faking a smile good enough that my workplace says I'm a great co-worker that brings a smile to the force each day but in truth I sit in my car each morning and each evening crying my eyes out because I see no possible way out of this. 

Whatever I do I'll make my SO crash, hard. And I'm honestly not sure if my own mental health could handle such a crash. I'm hardly holding it together as is. 

I'm chasing a dopamine rush wherever I can, be it so through alcohol, nicotine, spending money, going to the gym. 

No help are to be found during these times of corona and social distancing. Yes, I've contacted several psychologists and what not. 


If you made it this far, thank you. If just one person reads this I'm glad. 

Take care, each and everyone of you have my love. 
Cheers.",2.2806632653061207,3.49066023089172,3.4819342259196686,92.926110100091,75.671974522293,6.7188873001429865,23.325880670739625,7.209633053413488,0.6207401143897044,2307,66,534,25,49,749,279,628,0.121,0.735,0.14400000000000002,0.9447,8,0,1,0,0,0,68.0,9,3,1,6,32,32,1,3,31,1,36,15,7,7,5,83,95,37,2,14,23,0,4,3,0,6,6,5,3,5,37,30,1,1,5,2,10,9,14,11,0,4,16,14,63,21,71,67,14,82,1,5,5,2,51,32,0,7,40,315,100,9,0.1295628380008032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057424819256698914,0.06923163562387688,0.0,0.0,0.07148790675897397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04405358636978658,0.06792896621789672,0.049557608220766027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05766919736875645,0.06056188191662101,0.0,0.18259282687436534,0.09962582498590968,0.0,0.03949015174325241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05729390069967984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604897412616134,0.06654836217655209,0.13706030318560716,0.0,0.06792208530384712,0.0,0.0,0.10344538351956167,0.0,0.07115934687085224,0.08355731204435934,0.0,0.11159228251980552,0.06575177664725043,0.06723288525537376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387304598453542,0.0,0.12836254884495493,0.0,0.0,0.06190142200160565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551086382090866,0.04627985867782646,0.0,0.0709648780241953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102948222200198,0.0,0.0,0.30461055905918644,0.0,0.1104503199189448,0.10867116144786028,0.10362323733974144,0.07142174314644212,0.0,0.0,0.05728599487813343,0.0,0.1160628541138156,0.0,0.0,0.06885961908170435,0.0,0.07676629342584737,0.08684323924452625,0.0,0.06498104521145248,0.06434256611298626,0.06379664849226381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428556242096511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035602173702152275,0.05280550274614373,0.0,0.0,0.07038520129181018,0.0,0.09151406410829796,0.09494678726318724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724738374162172,0.0,0.0,0.11693551976665033,0.061297745007362764,0.12972630065619192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528443360004559,0.0,0.0654107660837219,0.0,0.051707910595332335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158594663640565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797720183329878,0.0,0.17559026428389365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312927267067258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730313163358874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06479894977240384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19189150792282889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20606713809955202,0.0,0.0,0.20648961465891197,0.0,0.0,0.0731845641726405,0.0,0.1071757184596896,0.0,0.2593128134658216,0.06603649855444635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051734524895291054,0.0,0.0,0.13544720938651736,0.07415922593675528,0.0,0.07351318658710855,0.1831671622538276,0.0,0.04870756494123321,0.05206885071598448,0.0,0.05964202695743798,0.0,0.0,0.043037896252388484,0.0,0.0,0.05142921053159742,0.07554913275501154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796466227449584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038209759355127736,0.051420475075666126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232614083610298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18864657830107565,0.0,0.0,0.09203772277634586,0.0,0.0,0.2920197692580473
mentalhealth,awaythrow2056,2020/03/31,"Bullied(?) by two of my closest friends I have a huge insecurity about not being smart enough and just an hour ago two friends were picking at that jokingly. This triggered me, badly. The moment I expressed that this was triggering me and that I was crying because of them they immediately said things like “Oh, [My name] you always turn a good situation into a bad one.” Eventually this situation got worse (I’d rather not say how) and I was giving hints to me wanting to hurt/kill myself. They weren’t catching on so I outright said that what they were saying made me want to kill myself. Them two and me all have mental health problems so they start saying “this doesn’t only affect you!” Even though they said that they still didn’t think that understanding my side was a good thing to do. They begin being very petty and currently I’m near the edge. I know this seems like a toxic relationship but I haven’t left them because when we aren’t mad we’re great friends and they have actually helped me through a lot. The last message I sent to them was “Bye y’all. Have a nice life without me.”
I’m slightly better now but I want to self harm, I’m nearly 2 years clean (yay) and I know it would be the bad choice. I was and still kind of am considering suicide but that’d be worse than self harm. At this point the only thing I can think of is to scare them; the only way I can think of making it so I don’t self harm or commit suicide it to make them think I’ve killed myself. I know this is a horrible thing to do and I should not be justifying it but it’s the only way I’ve thought of. I need help deciding what to do. I don’t want to talk to them, I shouldn’t self harm, and the only way I’ve thought of to make me feel better is to scare them into thinking I’ve killed myself. I’ll wait to hear responses in the morning and after I’ve slept.
Sorry if this was ramble-y and sorry for any poor grammar.",2.4963072047000594,4.162861068877554,3.7626252319109486,89.24384662956093,76.06632653061223,6.384168212739643,22.337971552257265,7.106945922332613,0.5630721088435373,1497,41,323,16,33,489,182,392,0.218,0.67,0.11199999999999999,-0.9953,3,0,0,0,0,5,36.0,1,3,16,2,13,30,4,3,18,1,38,3,1,9,2,64,75,24,5,11,12,0,1,2,3,3,2,7,1,4,26,15,0,1,14,1,1,2,12,15,0,4,20,8,54,15,37,46,3,31,0,0,0,0,44,13,0,4,16,212,80,0,0.0,0.0,0.07244670210845992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658085278991302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061772920685941125,0.0,0.0,0.05048516835052375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18595976997817687,0.09051099459694162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13131699190172152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154822121252177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670888820940529,0.0,0.049034258973781344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03753754530930863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17207095137775547,0.0,0.0,0.0712169582450738,0.0,0.1245365549694462,0.059375830814435336,0.08184892590513206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891274577992145,0.08367291855099722,0.0,0.099521875848265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311060925427962,0.0,0.07947454644117766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464038629281103,0.07730865138740836,0.12239968736555247,0.06051481651449541,0.0,0.0,0.08066105462504601,0.0,0.052437307761584034,0.07253899828703238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06311547123997042,0.0,0.07024687956680377,0.14866562901698752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481560282745392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05504738967829837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05030636994383865,0.2823110978483663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07017999377238847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103684115214337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970506479191798,0.0,0.0,0.21185529917346294,0.1771138575042575,0.1486526822613571,0.0,0.0,0.06758453471110477,0.3097905011968147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16689583211956266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662093026672866,0.05254685308215392,0.0,0.11857496354323645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16241116306774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05967061732839121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972847721877527,0.2378472511125638,0.07293958878251995,0.11787518637088447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075087782168222,0.21756258904513914,0.07728557422458407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06125507440842271,0.17515269857798585,0.17678274720257411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156389219417864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15131207429917748,0.05273736274226935,0.0,0.0,0.047807579124605884
mentalhealth,DuckThePainAway,2020/03/31,"How to go through getting kicked out by your Dad for a stupid reason So basically I was staying at my dad's house with his new kid and new concubine. The girl clearly doesn't like me and they've been trying to make up excuses for months for me to move out. I for one don't want to move out because that house is just a walking distance from my university, which I'm prioritizing. 
With the covid-19 quarantine, I needed to buy a few things so my mom picked me up. My dad and the girl became furious with me going out and used that as an excuse to pack up all my things (even my display items and spraypaints) and have me stay with my mom. 

My mom's house is really small (its basically just a room and three people can't even sleep at the same time) and I can't do my plates or schoolwork there. All my stuff is currently in my mom's car because it can't fit in the house. 

Now I'm trying to figure out a way to cope with the situation. Usually I paint or craft to destress (I'm a Fine Arts student) but since I can't paint here I really am just sucking it all up. I've had a really bad history of self-harm and since I can't even go out to get fresh air, I'm getting desperate. 

Thinking of where I'm going to stay next and probably having to get a part time job when I can barely handle schoolwork is daunting. We're not rich and I don't think my mom can afford having to pay rent. 

All of this stress in the midst of the covid pandemic is just depressing.",4.649048136083966,4.37502174592834,5.782839305103147,83.98028863554107,69.3257328990228,9.297792254795514,28.456207021353602,8.998388855275968,1.9261351429605509,1144,35,256,19,18,383,155,307,0.10300000000000001,0.871,0.025,-0.9713,4,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,0,15,9,3,1,17,0,23,1,1,5,5,46,43,19,0,2,8,8,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,10,22,0,0,4,1,4,8,9,6,0,2,3,0,29,3,45,40,8,42,0,1,0,0,15,20,1,2,11,164,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599017672156977,0.11095861984783803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838742767165577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18033523082651293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190197447167942,0.0,0.2068940317008251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42005675566882594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031412855473686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04446325648566992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060750383928470014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5329534661809633,0.0726439142621656,0.19346005332599195,0.0,0.06748331970198569,0.0,0.17579750355872978,0.09679096765816583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061671241194290335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855577590216397,0.0,0.0630953963828099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09812498412015004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17491145532805896,0.0935742112733542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494406344732087,0.0,0.0,0.15057006970756429,0.1022998988841566,0.09107647926404776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910160580362092,0.0,0.0,0.10425250936619948,0.0,0.10418553735150383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209269997331786,0.11663203055308816,0.0,0.0,0.10613820321201382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358065353632106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860406896899684,0.10023548585215314,0.0,0.05368049976520309,0.07224009904306028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ComeHereDevilLog,2020/03/31,"If you’re struggling even more during the lockdown, I want you to know you’re not forgotten. I have struggled with clinical depression since I was a child. Two suicide attempts and some counseling later I’m in an okay spot.

My wife and I have hardly left our apartment for two weeks because of the lockdown. I’m not more depressed per say, but I feel forgotten. It feels like if I never came out of this apartment no one would even notice.

If you feel like I do, you are NOT forgotten. You STILL matter. Someone texted me that today and it made me feel much better, so I’m passing it on to you.

Not forgotten, just alone for a little while. Even this shall pass. Stay strong folks, keep your head up. The sun comes out, always.",2.5809356136820942,4.9257664295774655,3.1572635814889334,90.49211267605637,78.36619718309859,6.02897384305835,23.523138832997986,7.1686216300943375,0.907998390342052,571,19,113,7,14,178,93,142,0.065,0.727,0.20800000000000002,0.9491,0,3,0,0,0,1,20.0,1,6,0,3,6,9,0,2,6,1,7,2,1,1,1,29,20,9,1,5,9,1,5,2,0,2,1,1,0,1,6,8,0,1,5,0,0,4,6,4,0,3,3,6,17,5,12,15,4,20,0,2,0,0,10,9,0,4,8,75,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15711161296001502,0.0,0.0,0.1262234700178086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247265376096436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341630459275671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735001497320552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067292649110993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613115941144216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30058191754714125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3068088199345895,0.2167437276739387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358900846058416,0.0,0.1556841635960774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483463749080024,0.0,0.0,0.08336831682241821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16481846895069147,0.0,0.0,0.1482222950401783,0.15203954016779211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14353870269344504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151423161400452,0.0,0.1169975348926986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17270723789715706,0.0,0.0,0.10279333578209883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063498284891168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12548474324866213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285317789294649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16168806720059092,0.12114485756433375,0.0,0.0,0.3171718097697208,0.0,0.16593112600473098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14379035078015046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963704767978901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947440541907345,0.0,0.12168161809465736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776069596515166,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,osi_16,2020/03/31,"i (m22) have something wrong with me i dont know what it is but i know i have it i don't pretend that people on this subreddit can diagnose me or anything  but i need to talk about this, at least i can feel better, i have been dreading going to a psychiatrist because i feel too embarrassed to do that and also because i didn't really feel the need to do that (i will explain why), besides in my family we don't really do that, i feel like i would be making a big deal out of whatever i have if i do that, my family is  the kind of family that will blame you for spending money on going to a psychiatrist instead of dealing with your stupid mental issue, especially my dad , Okay here we go i will try to explain what is it that i have even though it's a little embarrassing for me to explain that, ever since i was a kid i always felt like i wasn't very normal, i wasn't like the other kids, for instance even though i was very active and always misbehaving, i was at the same time extremely shy but fortunately being a kid helped a lot because when you're a kid you're not really that self-aware you're just busy being a kid you know ? therefore the mental issue that i have ( i don't even know if it's a mental issue) didn't really manifest itself although at times i remember acting very weirdly and my twin brother would notice and he would make fun of me because we were kids, like for example i remember this time when i pretended (or really thought) that i liked watching the news and i was maybe 9 or 10 i would pretend to be concentrated on that maybe because i thought that was cool, but the issue wouldn't end there i would make that my personality i remember thinking like this ''yeah that's cool, watching the news is cool i would be that now'' and i would make that my personality, now i know what you think, kids do that, kids act like that, its a way of developing a personality, i know, but that for me (i think) is when it all started, now as i've mentioned before  being a kid prevented the issue that i have from manifesting itself too much in my childhood, Now coming to my teenager years i dont really remember all of that  but i remember it being more intense and this is where i think i can explain the issue a little bit clearer, what i remember from this is practically having no personality at all, like my personality would build itself on whatever i have around me, and this would be more intense because i literally can't think or use my brain unless i have an object with that i keep with me or that im using, with that object i can think, i can be intelligent, i can live a normal life, i can have friends, i can be social and everything, like for example i would have a little rock in my hand that needs be held  in a certain way for it to work, or for example if not a rock i would have a cover of a pen this time held in different way (oh my gosh i feel so embarrassed) there were times when i didn't need an object i would just use my hand to hold things in a specific way then it would work, i would have a personality i would be intelligent, i would be social, however there were also times when one of these ''tools'' didn't work and i would be mad at myself so i would try to switch between these tools when they didn't work, like my depression or sadness isn't caused by normal things like in the case of my friends or the people that i know, normal people, it's caused by the fact that one of these tools didn't work so i needed to switch that with another one or create a new tool, usually when one of these tools doesn't work i would stay in like a state of pause or standby, no personality no nothing, and i stay like that for hours just thinking about a new tool that i can use, also in these teenage years i wasn't really self aware of this issue so i never thought about asking for help or asking if someone has the same feeling, maybe sometimes i would wonder, especially when i was in those standby stages and in my late teens if others have the same thing, if others used object like and depended on them to create their personality and be normal. In recent years however as i was exiting my teenager years something would change in my mental issue, maybe because of normal physiological growth that i didn't have control over or maturity  i don't know, but it was something that caused it to change, also i was becoming very self-aware of it, something that also i didn't have control over is this change, it went from using and relying on objects to create my personality and be normal, hence something concrete to something abstract, it also became very very complex and very strong something that i can't live with, like for example remember when i told you sometimes i use my hands in a specific way and that becomes my tool right ? now i don't have to use that anymore because it has become in my head ( this is extremely hard to explain not to mention embarrassing), like i just have to picture myself touching that object in a specific way and it works, that would create a personality for me, make me intelligent etc.., there's plenty of other abstract tools that i have created that for some reason- maybe because i have have matured or something - take the form of aspects that are present in normal people like for example a behavior reflecting a very low self esteem and lack of confidence, like me pretending to be someone else more confident, more popular, charismatic, a celebrity for example, i would study the person i wanted to pretend to be for hours, picture his body in my head, try to remember it and then i would pretend i'm him, there's other ''tools'' that i've used that resemble that, anyways you got the idea of the abstract ''tools'' that have ''replaced'' the others i dont have to mentions them all, now as this issue changed drastically i also changed, i was becoming very self aware of this issue and this would manifest especially when one of these ''tools'' wouldn't work and i would have my usual stage of standby but i would also become extremely depressed and i would think to m self ''why am i not normal, why am i not like the others, i know for sure that the others don't have this issue'', i first had these thoughts when i was in my freshman year of college, at that time i was pretty confident  i was the only with that mental issue, when i went to college overseas this mental issue became very intense, at that time i was very exited to go study abroad in a country that i love, also i wanted to make a lot of cool friends, but i also knew i was very shy and not sociable, so i needed a strong tool that would allow me to make friends and be intelligent and social, i decided to use the one that i was used multiple times- that was the least one that has failed me- i used the tool in which i pretended to be someone else, someone very cool and social who wore hype clothes and was very handsome, Unfortunately although this tool has proven to be very effective at the beginning as i was really making friends and being cool, at the end it has failed me, there was something about Italian people maybe the confidence, the spontaneity the social skills that they had, that has caused my tool to fail, how u may ask (or may not), i couldnt pretend anymore, it worked with my the people that i know back in my country but i doesn't work with them, it ended up with me acting very weird therefore i would be very self-aware of the issue that i have, also on the academic level it didnt work as well, (oh my gosh there's so much to say) simply because i couldn't use my brain when i was pretending to be someone else therefore i cant focus in class, i cant focus on two things at the same time, anyways when that ''tool'' has failed me, i became very very depressed, i finally acknowledged that i have something wrong with me, it wasn't good, it wasn't right, it was wrong, not normal, i remember i would get very very depressed for months, those two year in college were very decisive and important, for the first time in my life as i admitted to myself that there was something  that wasnt  normal with me i tried to abandon those ''tools'' i tried to live without them, i realized that i couldnt do it in a very painful and depressing way, the first time i let go of these tools was in the ending of the first year of college, from there my life went downhill, i wasn't doing very good at college, there was something about me becoming an adult and being responsible for my own life that made these tools that i so much depended on my whole life ineffective against the real problems of life outside the cocoon of the family, like academic life, university debt, social life, etc, but when i realized that i coudnt do anything, i would be depressed for months on end, i started drinking to then become an alcoholic, i abandoned University, i abandoned friends, everything, sometimes i would get back to using these because i would be tired of being depressed, but i would realize that the tools changed, the previous ones don't satisfy me anymore, they have become even more abstract than before, like for example i would read a book then i would pretend that my life is that book, or my life is a novel, recently it has become worse because these tools have become a mix of old and new, a mix of concrete and abstract tools, so i dont always use them, being alcoholic has helped me a lot, because when im drunk i dont to use them, i dont to think about them or even obsess about creating a good tool for me, in fact i love being drunk, hey listen i don't expext anyone to understand me i know im not making any freaking sense i just needed to get this out otherwise i would really find myself in a sick home, i just want help, i want to be normal",9.258133415680746,6.47280019332986,9.188243491015774,71.38431120889871,61.65763418447109,12.290508816963568,37.86540700853711,10.504223727775694,3.738326380123392,7677,272,1495,135,81,2527,445,1919,0.094,0.764,0.142,0.9979,4,0,15,0,0,0,162.0,3,6,11,27,84,82,2,6,90,8,219,29,8,41,10,305,325,120,0,74,51,2,12,21,6,45,16,2,1,25,151,55,5,10,61,19,3,13,56,33,1,14,63,22,240,49,196,182,29,169,0,16,2,2,88,67,0,31,98,1102,391,27,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0364417327592266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14998038804202452,0.042559967002337606,0.0,0.0,0.011594331168882544,0.017878020728643456,0.0,0.0,0.050725946503827835,0.01192149577853012,0.0,0.028060780965765798,0.015177782960153841,0.04781729977155533,0.0,0.0,0.026220221848997357,0.0,0.1351128285880313,0.1882997374761842,0.029015954006316694,0.0,0.0,0.015079009756280544,0.018613777113764086,0.018938292282430227,0.0,0.03806604526427554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005865477965809,0.1082174694179666,0.014686744176224056,0.0,0.0,0.038245213381668586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03515483404244602,0.10279373261417822,0.01730501274042611,0.0,0.017813231620802766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989221676448687,0.016702143818548024,0.0,0.0,0.0427283273555652,0.0,0.07550454561453898,0.0,0.03802968244013556,0.05630558991261377,0.01542236393359849,0.0,0.0,0.03064621116506527,0.0,0.0642914846749172,0.0,0.05172482285029868,0.01218025709543162,0.016370315873535414,0.01867703324458897,0.01558305040260526,0.058009616827377035,0.0,0.0,0.07903499819854262,0.0,0.0267231795812267,0.0,0.04844848030078307,0.042901255203970964,0.01363614440404183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015273117104538231,0.0,0.034995672698591634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04571202294985422,0.0,0.01710216624720534,0.0,0.03358089685934832,0.0,0.0,0.019246953848026133,0.05524956939760232,0.24913533665349055,0.0,0.015154492059654126,0.0,0.017754563086368406,0.10307032159582102,0.0,0.019232722138050145,0.0,0.0,0.017434398984025018,0.12042655925621233,0.17492131968490074,0.05126461672840135,0.045165399607067086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0434849500959646,0.030775908462921425,0.0161327695219953,0.10242682708031252,0.0,0.10277185303238448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309208475943454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02721769957437216,0.0,0.03760031329445671,0.08849457786036438,0.013149723591250663,0.04939990864738702,0.0,0.0,0.20046017640961533,0.016359577152322273,0.019411113598579888,0.017890715715480898,0.0,0.09242614923788936,0.012967009789404042,0.018142005454329518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092038861269034,0.16375784542844704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01734560033833736,0.0,0.016314190650821302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017054241095165484,0.0194062084192263,0.09830185002258586,0.017529856397574695,0.033668900002496435,0.0,0.17382513616638087,0.02912057698326234,0.0,0.01355854789037482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245053570604216,0.0,0.0,0.014103627825597388,0.0,0.0,0.1042796870674927,0.07223046909339953,0.15750763207656918,0.05058755184683266,0.0,0.024135627806053998,0.036345268191185096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.016069071884476763,0.0,0.012819197820085377,0.013703844534171028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0453080589420006,0.09832241422171828,0.03350234436359459,0.05414199821574355,0.11930129692472335,0.01959603839238933,0.0,0.016291649458160674,0.0,0.057877888590523986,0.0,0.033310016780042716,0.01774926322747985,0.0,0.2356064599493245,0.03755551126787265,0.33762547298710244,0.04022524750906496,0.09473240346856293,0.0,0.0,0.015329662452201876,0.0474155257483866,0.04615391000909542,0.019035299918195508,0.0,0.016435232226474444,0.018489593435916368,0.13653564846988295,0.0,0.017375026731559117,0.4602395080819528,0.05592327262204443,0.0,0.07685580656744312
mentalhealth,med_z,2020/03/31,"my mental stability is deteriorating I'm having mood swings and I feel like shit. the past two weeks I was manic and now I feel empty like I literally don't feel anything. but I also feel every emotion in one. I wanna explode and no matter what my mood I'm incredibly hypersexual, even though I don't get much out of masturbation. I don't really like it and in the past it caused me to dissociate. It really exhausting dealing with all this emotional (and non-emotional) intensity.",4.081521739130434,6.2961986739130475,6.979782608695654,65.50380434782613,73.13043478260869,10.252173913043476,27.80434782608696,10.411451182825502,3.5153,386,15,67,13,8,141,60,92,0.114,0.773,0.11199999999999999,-0.2879,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,1,0,2,0,6,2,1,1,1,16,13,8,0,1,1,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,1,4,11,3,7,12,2,7,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,7,46,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373302552203587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413169311075047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17641123572184242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17704329991859608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.579510276727472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342425829638493,0.0,0.14468765199787553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34732191933414164,0.12268201337138596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897204234969072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516918451648897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730607219788577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623932051727016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11636685896516626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3278662675441309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22002580413377096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762755998268381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16872119475741004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16775261359396942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13774927706879694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,phillyphenomphour,2020/03/31,"Mentally falling apart I’m deeply in debt and ignoring payments, I have nothing to do because of the pandemic so I’m alone with my thoughts, and I’m desperately holding on to a relationship I’m nearly certain will end.

My debt is due to idiotic spending on credit cards and being careless with money in general and I feel like that will work itself out eventually. Maybe not idk fuck it

None of my friends are in town during the pandemic so I’m trapped at home trying to stay occupied without video games even though I hate video games and I’m bored of TV so I sit alone with my thoughts and feel useless and designed to fail.

My girlfriend of 4 months told me she needed a break (we all know how this typically ends) and she started seeing another guy and I’ve seen other girls but I’m not interested in anyone but her. She’s only ever dated me and needs to get out and experience life which I understand and I’ve done well the past 2 months but now it’s hitting me I’m so close to a mental meltdown.  I get so angry I want to break shit and hurt myself and just freak out until I have a fucking brain aneurism. I want her back bad and she still loves me and we live together still and I don’t want to be alone.

I can’t handle my life right now. Why the fuck am I like this.",1.2460416939819048,3.584207190114072,3.067048642978893,89.22619771863121,83.56273764258555,6.061046282942178,23.137406581880164,7.372421405659032,1.0073006162318077,1013,37,212,16,29,337,148,263,0.205,0.695,0.10099999999999999,-0.9808,2,4,0,0,0,2,13.0,2,0,0,2,16,22,6,0,8,0,13,8,2,1,3,51,44,28,0,5,7,0,2,2,2,2,2,0,1,2,8,26,0,2,6,5,5,1,6,14,1,0,5,4,31,8,29,34,2,35,0,3,2,4,17,15,4,0,17,129,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647627888755762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123100696290894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208651580847368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027083074531704,0.09802135702795853,0.07156395050432364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105356426747375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013760320826306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079572963775744,0.0,0.0,0.0775394259634939,0.10619205377896432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11483651822953507,0.0,0.0,0.11871861740252893,0.08386823979051877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070041418699767,0.3255941261167232,0.12266988102268216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624120928387198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590495568157615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775848149345708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567561616568934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451816678831833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16584154947985902,0.11470821431503335,0.0,0.10366345403061668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595512272509568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794078382068478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23661656228782466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18740988277709708,0.0,0.0,0.1740963598012688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264531846352102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928549519629042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112068452375216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604014213109674,0.0,0.10025615691587184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354998595081483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205060454195558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309400222315745,0.12512928274117885,0.18750634350772866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534168074680196,0.18639976371266045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217759630480743,0.0,0.07970466634402328,0.0,0.0,0.12221412510460372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20773088022431108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105553749512495,0.0,0.10593227935953983,0.0,0.0,0.11316624818205248,0.0,0.08546620990545419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hellobster,2020/03/31,"Something’s wrong and I dont know what to do Hi all, 
I’ve been feeling so wrong for the past 4 or 5 years, but in the past few weeks I just feel weirder and weirder. I saw a therapist around a year and a half ago and I couldn’t even get myself to open up to her about how I was truly feeling, I couldn’t say it out loud. I just feel like I am wrong. I feel like the way I act, the things I feel, even the way I look naturally is just wrong. I feel like other people are just on autopilot and cruising along but I am in my head every single second. I can feel each moment and I am overly aware of my own existence. I don’t know who I am and I know I’d be better off if I had just been born someone else because there is nobody around me that is completely similar to me and it’s really hard for me to be able to be friends with people. I’ve had the same group of friends since the seventh grade and I know they all have their own issues, but I feel like (in the LEAST self-boosting way ever) I am different from them? Even on quizzes online that are like “Which are you most like” the highest I get is ~80%. I don’t know how to act like a normal person I don’t know how to be a person because my overly active brain just controls me completely. I feel like anything could happen at any moment, like my brain is on edge but my body doesn’t care enough to do anything about it and too tired to move. Sorry about all this. I wish I had a parental like figure that could guide me through all this, I’m just a teenager. I don’t know what to do I don’t know how to block it out",1.24076225045372,2.6308550584795327,2.8449828594474686,95.67026315789477,78.82456140350877,5.7698729582577135,20.27263561201855,6.311591054244273,-0.09567848356523534,1218,29,293,9,29,401,153,342,0.078,0.7390000000000001,0.183,0.9902,2,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,3,2,23,18,0,0,16,0,39,5,4,5,5,69,65,21,0,7,13,1,11,10,2,0,1,2,0,2,15,18,0,2,19,1,0,4,9,4,0,2,7,15,47,14,38,50,13,33,0,0,2,0,14,16,0,3,20,204,62,1,0.07584694234915268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723373804989285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051578521699901424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483114195007293,0.13503971835266101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924711841403532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708045687143338,0.0,0.08424885448071495,0.0,0.16934054350304506,0.0,0.0,0.07733101265868503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15904815200924155,0.0,0.08506879524098822,0.12111522348785755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924391155608998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889205155465599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336038786564803,0.0,0.0,0.07837016661237055,0.0,0.15028857027619652,0.06860790167420698,0.06390432018096091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835049299735813,0.27092535384585165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719831902495995,0.0,0.07925379382066346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06707120063098193,0.0,0.06794396248709922,0.0,0.07784084469362812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916450215824856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33346796756951835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3705498485475484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06369232903272963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806132963777078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431389967149725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421905359826674,0.0,0.14480897746536367,0.10516543960846812,0.13245324901266645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04858949344082364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06031653282940092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912490247364637,0.0,0.0,0.06274137449189482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06426486811980603,0.05839068176671434,0.0,0.08490444227924604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08806414596993709,0.050389338274042544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08717490269439736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18061131735656696,0.060839842135454326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722024054078033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33170689922526136,0.0,0.09768588826633699
mentalhealth,oOceanMan,2020/03/31,"What could cause the symptom of have a ""favorite person"" I heard someone on youtube once tell the story of life with their mental illness and a big part of it was he developed a ""favorite person"" and this person became larger than life itself uncontrollably. I've struggled with this my whole life as well as ridiculous naivety and delusions of grandeur/mania. I've tried to talk to professionals but they always get stuck on trying to find the source of all my issues to no avail. Anyone else have this/these  symptoms? I figure that one sounds pretty specific so I'm just hoping for some kinda direction towards an answer",8.893157894736845,8.637101473684215,7.760350877192984,73.26578947368422,60.57894736842106,9.35438596491228,34.78947368421053,8.344100000000001,2.8749578947368413,504,18,81,5,6,154,84,114,0.10400000000000001,0.78,0.11699999999999999,0.5567,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,0,3,5,1,2,7,0,4,6,0,1,1,16,9,7,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,3,6,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,1,1,3,2,6,2,18,5,4,4,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,3,0,54,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982041097149747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749551678864087,0.17217396836897458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726204916265096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13416403030525145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14037351792710895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15358295588167312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779250113861747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16689885418169334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17538717860227074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3560689298830037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16934197409247145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895413308097874,0.11386635506183115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819679117032112,0.0,0.0,0.4401708027152998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709542421205684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237737363962427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17566896546386795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3493099806707065,0.0,0.13506193563674956,0.1468719187008057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22817245610491554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15108562259952932,0.0,0.0,0.1876075320299208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,howvulgar,2020/03/31,"I wanna be painless I just want a way out. I don’t know what to do with myself anymore. Everything is so wrong. Real life has no appeal so I choose to distract myself with all this bullshit in my head. Still, it doesn’t go away. Talking to people doesn’t do anything because it always comes back. The misery comes back no matter what I do. I truly believe that the only way I can be at piece is if I off myself. Nobody will care, no one ever cared about me. There’s nowhere to run. Nowhere to hide. It’s all gonna end. What am I doing here? It all seems so pointless and it’s driving me mad. I’m going to hurt myself. I have to get out.",-1.0255147058823546,1.076116889705883,1.3781764705882371,97.2932941176471,97.01470588235294,3.014117647058824,16.358823529411765,4.406508900861427,-0.9527458823529412,491,13,108,1,20,165,87,136,0.19399999999999998,0.7020000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.9417,0,0,0,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,0,0,11,6,1,1,3,0,16,2,1,0,4,20,28,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,10,7,0,0,3,0,0,6,6,4,0,1,0,0,17,2,17,24,4,19,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,2,5,83,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15107923776843832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800668062656149,0.0,0.0,0.14941510877800315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705892445773791,0.2792293845656621,0.0,0.11068225301253494,0.0,0.0,0.20456511762749874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.370241639636104,0.0,0.0,0.3128097512841741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16081547993968545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423877778482807,0.0,0.0,0.16318173683221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486185930687104,0.0,0.20637871663235485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863412942568744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19437244936773934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978510143788304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824694703244194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12303527082121528,0.13809075239730145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587648685510247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20666429387441446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529281561737946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500055130637213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459375934153819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107093593359386,0.28824067678200754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19851625826662406,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Swaraj_K,2020/03/31,My issue Fear of chronic illness and conditions what to do?,4.622727272727271,7.166974909090911,5.863636363636362,72.61545454545455,72.63636363636364,8.036363636363637,38.27272727272727,8.841846274778883,4.179654545454547,48,3,7,1,1,16,11,11,0.396,0.604,0.0,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7331705080320706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6800448559852471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SpiritRealmResearch,2020/03/31,"Can someone completely overcome years of addiction or compulsive disorder in a matter of seconds by a sudden emotional cathartic experience? Is it possible to completely overcome an addiction or a compulsive disorder in just a matter of seconds by experiencing a sudden emotional catharsis, without relapses or even feeling withdrawal symptoms afterwards?

I ask this question motivated by two conversion testimonies which I haven't been able to wrap my head around. I just lack the psychological expertise to provide a satisfactory explanation for them, and so I believe they will be interesting case studies to analyze here.

\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_

**Testimony 1**: [From Atheist To Believer In Jesus Christ - How Jesus Cured My Eating Disorder - Christian Testimony](https://youtu.be/hyHAFvPn-ik?t=948)

This testimony has many details, but I want to focus here on the eating disorder aspect of it (from 15:47 to 23:34), and the experience this girl had that made her free in a matter of seconds. This girl had been suffering from bulimia and anorexia for 4 years and had not been able to defeat her eating disorders no matter how hard she had tried. According to her testimony, in December of 2017 she was in the bathroom throwing up in the bathtub, and while she was doing this she felt very impotent and hopeless, which made her enter into a state of despair. In this state she says she cried out in her mind the word ""Jesus"" and immediately, in a matter of seconds, a feeling of immense love and peace came over her, her sadness was gone, but most astonishingly, her 4 year bondage to bulimia and anorexia was immediately gone. According to her testimony, this experience happened 2 years prior to the recording of the video, and ever since she has never relapsed or even had the desire to.

She spends quite a while in the video describing her bathroom experience and uses an interesting analogy: she says she has a 5 year old son for whom she feels a deep maternal love, specially when they hug each other. Then she proceeds to say that the feeling of love that came over here in the bathroom surpassed that.

I find this testimony impressive. There are 2 aspects about this testimony which intrigue me a lot:

* She experiences an emotional transition from deep despair to immense peace and love in just seconds. How is this possible?
* Not only that, but also as a result of this experience she was completely healed from bulimia and anorexia (despite suffering these eating disorders for 4 years straight and numerous failed attempts to stop them up to that point).

\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_

**Testimony 2**: [MY TESTIMONY: JESUS SAVED ME FROM DEMONS, ATHEISM, SEVERE DEPRESSION & MORE!!](https://youtu.be/4ZFhNIKjYPw?t=1657)

This testimony describes a somewhat similar experience to the first one. In short: a woman tells that for decades she used to deal with severe depression, strong anger and hatred issues, porn addiction, stealing addiction (compulsive stealing). She also used to be a lesbian, and for many years experienced sleep paralysis at night and felt ""evil presences"" during these episodes. According to her testimony, one night she had a very intense ""attack"" during a sleep paralysis. In similar fashion to the previous testimony, she cried out ""Jesus save me"" a couple times, she broke down emotionally and cried for 1 hour, and afterwards she began to experience a sudden deliverance from all her addictions and mental health issues, without ever relapsing again. This experience is described from 27:37 to 33:41 in the video. But there is more. In [42:41](https://youtu.be/4ZFhNIKjYPw?t=2561) she tells that she changed so dramatically that she didn't even realize but after 3 months that her attraction to women was also gone, she was not a lesbian anymore.

I find this testimony incredible. She had an intense sleep paralysis ""attack"", then she cried for 1 hour and afterwards all her addictions and mental health issues and even her attraction to women were completely gone. I just don't understand what the heck is going on here.

\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_\_

So, I'm really intrigued to know a psychological explanation for these kinds of testimonies. I imagine that if we could learn how to tap into the power of our minds to suddenly turn our emotions into peace and love (like in the first testimony) or experience a strong emotional catharsis (like in the second testimony) to free ourselves from years of addictions and unhealthy compulsive disorders in a matter of seconds, that would just revolutionize therapy and addiction recovery programs.

So, what is really going on psychologically in these testimonies? Do these experiences have a name? How is it possible for a person to suddenly be free from years of addiction or compulsive habits or mental health issues in a matter of seconds, without therapy? Whatever is going on behind the scenes, can we tap into this to enhance addiction recovery programs?

Thanks in advance.",8.768729378729379,10.790058202702703,8.590722183222187,59.3611025798526,60.953316953316964,12.251632151632151,40.08853983853985,11.866587553639205,5.802300175500176,3963,208,543,131,56,1277,314,814,0.122,0.732,0.146,0.9184,1,0,0,0,0,1,310.0,4,0,4,11,33,40,4,0,53,0,44,32,4,12,5,116,78,57,0,6,24,1,7,2,0,2,15,3,0,6,42,39,4,1,15,3,4,13,11,17,0,13,30,12,64,26,121,42,8,100,8,11,0,9,72,45,1,12,42,424,106,5,0.07822573247091738,0.0,0.0,0.4263879747254157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383563499222088,0.0,0.042378774224936584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03878945336489836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034818743358746955,0.03656525008131973,0.08899306371907471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881336127947092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946939837381684,0.0,0.0,0.041376226296130005,0.0,0.16403638437783016,0.0,0.0,0.031228441046122,0.043277642550929564,0.1718545878437763,0.0,0.04032364764856481,0.06737570875191247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137871329995636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16008890678653798,0.0,0.2639802604021207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033347170651743,0.07075965352764778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4208587718377028,0.0,0.0,0.07910656151513648,0.0,0.07510897060508158,0.0,0.0714969022997851,0.06653876807812836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668622971390184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034587378439791726,0.0,0.03503744559710156,0.0,0.04014108481976273,0.1247254434246328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07703658911000459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16329468203258946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0407300313342126,0.02149540839318778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038217141550918834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03325236018405426,0.17650444422877165,0.07401907948306513,0.0,0.07930861471130231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182497091630752,0.0,0.0789856901459856,0.0,0.031219516670632868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030166253672504518,0.0,0.0,0.07340955076751053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0410423736218268,0.0,0.05300778082016229,0.029747097265320394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03415184614322293,0.0,0.0,0.03697430098812711,0.13228163959301315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043815361583664184,0.04160134773927913,0.0,0.0,0.0501134073052284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331236331780883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837281162263781,0.0,0.03235456713117872,0.0,0.11742333923906005,0.0,0.03314020463525578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03270010753105944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04065324406764708,0.0,0.0,0.0683727381183093,0.036009872250304234,0.08945794252067911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022807026839234246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026555068737907132,0.04254356692190317,0.03820758699029737,0.04071787314042615,0.0,0.10134287502877257,0.0,0.06454442174995542,0.02306978188509444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311022191528705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027784657970714784,0.0,0.0,0.2266866314094927
mentalhealth,Sl33ck,2020/03/31,"I cant feel sad Sorry english isnt my 1st language. im from the philippines

A fewminutes ago while i was eating, my dad suddenly cried and told me my grandpa is dead. I just stood there and wasnt even crying or feel sad. I wasnt even thinking of anything. After a few minutes i thought it was weird that i didnt even feel anything. I kept on asking myself if i didnt have any feelings. What is happening? I know there is something wrong with me because this isnt the first time i didnt cry because of a death. What is wrong with me and do i have any way of fixing myself?",1.4497988077496302,3.171269926229513,2.953487332339794,93.6416616989568,79.24590163934425,5.092101341281669,24.205663189269746,5.565023196281405,0.34407213114754104,449,16,99,2,11,147,69,122,0.161,0.743,0.09699999999999999,-0.8632,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,5,0,17,1,0,0,0,16,29,6,2,1,3,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,1,7,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,11,4,19,0,8,18,1,8,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,2,6,68,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398901588440135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21463413467162132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25973043865442386,0.0,0.14753222371213992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924005568199796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5200447715386687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16148031503502158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126985435909483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191764559135773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342341758336242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395519746821769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17046323969165725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672894053219425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149081672797055,0.0,0.17665678365513746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111908228595487,0.0,0.1252845115337147,0.09202101389629667,0.0,0.0,0.1507954203175792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526323146120213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3450836750132989,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Berrystressed,2020/03/31,"Hi I need sleeping tips please Hi whenever I try to fall asleep I start shaking, with the intensity changing based on my stress level, and I would really like to stop doing that. Does anyone have any tips on how to either stop doing that or at least how to fall asleep quickly?",3.158888888888889,5.414581555555557,3.9182962962962975,86.20633333333332,76.03703703703705,6.542222222222222,21.91111111111111,7.554174236665415,0.9035377777777782,220,6,42,3,5,70,39,54,0.161,0.752,0.087,-0.5162,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,4,3,3,2,0,10,6,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,8,5,2,11,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,5,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19783035964813456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20341266460802984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077466706693282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545793396850173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212506948578055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21570780594684896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3193343781017535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863658873057075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911224225804255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20590924390791607,0.0,0.0,0.486431466764953,0.3332390901803028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975103755233097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20665577196374826,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Twist-Up2,2020/03/31,"My friend believes the CIA is spying on him; it’s affecting every aspect of his life. What should I do? One of my friends is beginning to be paranoid that the CIA is spying on him, even though there isn’t any reason that the CIA would be spying on him in the first place. This is affecting his daily life. He

-Doesn’t get sleep (30+ hours awake)
-Believes they’re censoring his thoughts
-Forgets what me and my friends look like
-Believes he’s in a mental hospital
-Reality isn’t real anymore, doesn’t know what’s real and what’s not
-Gets mad for no apparent reason
-Doesn’t want to get help; the people helping might be the CIA too for all he knows

To me this sounds like schizophrenia. What other mental disorders could this possibly be and what should I advise him to do?",3.364314096499528,5.6763178675496695,3.8548391674550615,86.63584437086094,75.62251655629139,6.698391674550615,25.355250709555346,7.7094869923839395,1.4376429517502367,622,22,117,9,14,195,87,151,0.027000000000000003,0.8220000000000001,0.151,0.9544,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,0,7,0,20,3,1,4,1,21,29,4,0,5,1,0,0,2,3,4,2,1,0,0,13,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,7,1,0,2,1,2,14,5,13,19,1,9,0,0,1,0,16,6,0,1,5,79,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297197769654494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355861325187174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4620983798607888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915708211201666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566890706727424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030002633693728,0.0,0.11518963387794265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629107197521545,0.0,0.0,0.31688072311934723,0.0,0.21428634561298532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832765131620526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13463831368800774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502717382235709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19313395862435612,0.1335856520086601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480751287765692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755563578250581,0.1450347097707516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264270789272673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09478207772814598,0.0,0.14283975063585153,0.0,0.0,0.154127426914467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112268487153625,0.0,0.281134874324282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13681533727812067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134323367496768,0.10853771074070566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063899417259851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971195515999106,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,061emagsolgem,2020/03/31,"The lockdown has heightened my anxiety and has sent me delirious Hi, 

so i’m not allowed people in my apartment block but my boyfriend has been staying here recently since things have gone into lockdown. But he does need to leave every day as he is still working. Basically the security guy caught on that he wasn’t a resident there and has reported me and told my boyfriend not to come back.

this has really sent me in a bad way. The reason he was staying is because I have really bad mental health issues and he’s my support. With him not able to come here I’m really scared, it’s literally sent me insane and delirious. I haven’t slept for days or eaten. I not going to kill myself but I have experienced thoughts. 

 I‘m struggling tremendously. If you have any advice on how i can survive through this please let me know.

thanks mg x",3.0249074074074085,5.486011660493832,4.019243827160493,84.28034722222225,77.45679012345678,7.012962962962964,26.79166666666667,8.07648339933343,1.8897518518518528,667,27,125,12,16,215,102,162,0.14300000000000002,0.7509999999999999,0.106,-0.6803,1,2,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,1,0,2,7,8,1,2,5,0,17,3,1,3,0,25,36,13,1,2,9,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,9,1,2,3,0,0,8,6,5,0,0,12,1,18,3,13,23,0,22,0,0,0,0,13,6,0,2,5,79,23,2,0.1537636159097678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025602587381073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045645315977048,0.0,0.11762874530144793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823472937303366,0.2567723931482576,0.09373287307631016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649074798904848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19832962343047528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455957647736005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12955247817435414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738740640544022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152250154431926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16344353340124373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16048926596821347,0.0,0.0,0.17011665902913056,0.0,0.08450446203805201,0.0,0.0,0.1628134675349937,0.0,0.15723371507144712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154957559248616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11401377286539015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660033062703304,0.0,0.0,0.16878627592167486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955147290826202,0.1580946064493076,0.1518230205300541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15394420380535376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271948520299236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32778311131943555,0.12279582229010047,0.0,0.0,0.16074711700919395,0.0,0.0,0.17448912915311685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14156487873639598,0.0,0.0,0.10215371399746083,0.0,0.0,0.12207113546978815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692772439678012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205040120197892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194174369813784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gabriella14o,2020/03/31,"Lemonaidhealth? I’m currently quarantining and the last place I want to go to is to a doctors office so I was looking for any online doctor apps that could provide prescriptions. After reading the reviews for Teladoc I know to stay clear but I stumbled on Lemonaidhealth??? I was curious if anyone has any experience with it in terms of getting depression/anxiety medications???  
Thanks guys!",5.6403411513859245,8.927581179104479,6.107036247334758,68.32597014925375,73.02985074626865,9.798720682302774,36.437100213219615,9.957137785484203,4.901611513859276,317,18,45,10,7,102,54,67,0.0,0.833,0.16699999999999998,0.8751,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,5,3,0,0,1,8,12,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,5,1,11,9,1,9,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,4,30,7,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260947571756779,0.0,0.18341839508033184,0.0,0.0,0.1676481900699981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19143161771553036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4908161338013306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23453467656053845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526651501166364,0.0,0.1362631029689412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23740352670660336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176773045079432,0.19543922543560613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013409253053586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24153646740389165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250501790715179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23982834920521984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555559530052582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22074198607686693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141870418973368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,friedcornbread,2020/03/31,"I have no idea what's wrong with me. I grew up with horrible parents. They got divorced when I was about 7, I have 6 sisters and 5 brothers I think. My stepfather is in prison now for 3, 60 year sentences, and he's around 50, for touching my sisters.. Anyway, I'd really appreciate some help. I have no friends or family, or job, or anything, haven't for a few years. I constantly think about blocking the chimney in my shelter so I die from carbon monoxide, one of the easiest ways to go. I also always keep my pocket knife extremely razor sharp and regularly practice cutting my carotid artery. I know those two things aren't normal, but I've done them for as long as I can remember. The thing that's different now is that I sometimes have horrible thoughts about harming myself, mainly, and sometimes others. Since I'm alone, I'll just punch myself in the head to take my mind off it. What I wanna know is what disorder I have, I'm not stupid, I know I have at least one. Hell, I even hear voices, a male and female talking about me. The male talks about how shitty I am and the female tries to stand up for me but barely. Btw my mother died and I literally didn't lose a second of sleep, i was told, said ok and went back to sleep. I just can't seem to find my problem anywhere. I'm thinking schizophrenia but I'm not quite that smart. Any help would be appreciated.",3.2419077637690776,4.849414843065695,4.340265428002656,86.12794293297947,73.92700729927007,7.171599203715992,26.323158593231586,7.84624498591911,1.4637868613138685,1073,38,218,15,22,350,165,274,0.18899999999999997,0.718,0.09300000000000001,-0.9827,3,1,0,0,1,0,38.0,0,0,2,2,17,10,3,0,9,1,20,3,3,1,0,41,40,20,2,4,10,5,2,0,1,1,0,3,0,2,11,11,0,2,11,0,0,3,8,7,0,4,9,5,36,3,31,29,4,21,1,1,0,0,19,8,1,5,8,144,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842101079874108,0.0,0.09915843683243188,0.10317344021117622,0.0,0.0,0.08432057996489359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020369907861301,0.11038148239341668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534419368015674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13399411272545622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257373637181754,0.12954796610832311,0.1421085540033299,0.0,0.0,0.1268895258189775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189726388770449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689107365551403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133288180603594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09579792038818877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704689886441027,0.0,0.09916980875272542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725423205637312,0.0,0.13975092586775922,0.0,0.16622193338952745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13997481074016271,0.0,0.0,0.12304550783231515,0.11021209769934212,0.0,0.0,0.20443256828474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973131912904924,0.0,0.13871824082427012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12519919912604702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148838146645714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804389994864538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376813295429109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186460863759922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318835199108949,0.0,0.0,0.07943411583156079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14046171051210815,0.0,0.11794725909011858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288002694040168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256961445564776,0.0,0.2481682948605788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452676598932653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322850789145408,0.19932432531706026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16475300521544795,0.2383521990175833,0.0,0.0984378620791485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848215398432947,0.0,0.0841841941895617,0.0,0.1211247070927094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842114201680892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149442364608496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880822062704083,0.13556863011587633,0.0,0.15969691417152562
mentalhealth,BringChong,2020/03/31,"i feel like im not enough i feel like i am not enough. i feel like im not enough to pass high school and i feel very uncertain about what the future holds and i feel very very alone. i feel like talking to my friends about when i feel like hurting myself helps a fair bit so why not take it a step further and talk to random people on reddit right. i confessed to a girl that i really really like how i feel about her and she only sees me as her best friend. i feel like i failed like i have been failing for the past 2 years and now that this coronavirus thing is happening i feel even more isolated then before. ive started to see a therapist and ive called the suicide hotline twice, but the second time didnt help at all. ive been crying for 2 whole days now and now i feel empty and worthless. i have people that care about me i know that i do but i dont want to hurt any of them at all with my actions or thoughts and i dont know how to get better or what to do. my thoughts have amplified very very heavily in the past couple days and ive started having very very negative thoughts and with corona idk what to do and i might as well post here about it",1.7764151305683598,3.2927902782258087,3.004423963133643,94.55639784946241,77.66935483870971,6.336712749615978,21.083717357910906,7.07126945348624,0.28733463901689715,911,23,212,10,21,294,121,248,0.142,0.706,0.152,-0.1259,0,1,0,0,0,2,9.0,0,0,1,4,15,20,0,1,9,0,19,0,0,2,2,48,44,23,1,1,8,0,11,8,2,1,0,0,0,1,11,14,0,1,17,0,0,3,8,6,1,2,6,13,36,14,25,37,9,25,1,5,2,0,13,7,0,5,22,138,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785802141295497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051595367362068066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456124051099832,0.0,0.07962268306932672,0.06710236550078524,0.0828322612310611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747350309551156,0.0,0.07735626914280515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395060858459318,0.0833415153133703,0.09786195781037296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17784216780059967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23518728745958625,0.0,0.05011255162136713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4219932019088448,0.3252166064170477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723659626175788,0.0,0.03963983914473596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06709310623722467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017104213518997,0.08016263162719679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16244447839000858,0.0,0.16390894182932025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339421974100696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965366967747892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08048789878706585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05770385750817879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485627240582885,0.10519978687955818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266412926006763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721072575916358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06479402931318949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678622529963229,0.1209198660393884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10740477954516807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299134078349422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05704608667634543,0.12196561970057446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809290791973927,0.05040579554620525,0.0,0.0,0.18070099820559268,0.04424140665484887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.438214770616372,0.04475110276370409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821778283171874,0.0,0.06846242091440448,0.08470805929386775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488588963494976
mentalhealth,soymlk,2020/03/31,"so... what’s next? (tw: suicide mention) around a year ago i made major changes to my life, including choosing to recover cold turkey from anorexia and seeking help for depression after a failed suicide attempt in my college dorm. i’ve been on antidepressants since may and consistently see my therapist (even through this quarantine thanks to telehealth). i’ve made a lot of progress looking back, but i also have this feeling lingering over me that can’t shake. sort of feels like a shadow. 

i may not want to actively kill myself or be planning to do so, but remembering i’m on medication that is essentially preventing me from paving my own way towards my death bed makes it less redeeming. what’s next from here? i’m having trouble looking ahead towards the future. i thought by now i’d be feeling an excitement for life, but it seems that life almost has less of a purpose now that i’m not self destructing. wondering if anyone can relate. feeling pretty hopeless",6.6743220338983065,8.071267011299437,6.762500000000002,72.85019067796613,65.32768361581921,9.74180790960452,37.913841807909606,9.928628108626363,4.089279096045199,779,41,128,17,12,249,121,177,0.183,0.6829999999999999,0.133,-0.9019,0,1,0,0,0,4,22.0,0,0,0,5,9,10,2,1,7,0,12,4,0,3,0,29,30,10,4,2,7,0,4,1,0,2,4,0,2,1,10,3,0,1,9,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,4,8,12,3,24,22,5,19,0,3,3,0,3,7,0,9,11,86,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13006999314998222,0.0,0.14693195142106372,0.0,0.0,0.11734236498839465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259915845169756,0.0,0.0,0.13062352139391525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282865615608308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15522410803588854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12638095871106078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691579393190604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29677055039023004,0.1048261183774612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09835206866881076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16233837663265355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31092567235999025,0.07168635518456551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464376082985544,0.0,0.0,0.124747189671589,0.0,0.2776847146031527,0.09794544853678423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478181081506945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3121045211088985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492802606832209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662199388001566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692724118193028,0.13358025544033358,0.15307456972127398,0.0,0.0,0.1213790931024135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3210042762251303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509207583444058,0.0,0.17036837747394892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11648964939099075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654695307559307,0.11646986316078832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912573068687078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449127169028963
mentalhealth,Upstairs_Cloud,2020/03/31,"Something else Ive been diagnosed with bipolar disorder but sometimes it feels like the voice is really telling me to do things like, its the same voice but it just gets more and more persistent and it wont stop. Like  earlier today i just wanted to bash my head into a wall untill I black out. Is there something  more to my bipolarness, (I dont know the right term)",4.806249999999999,5.9089215694444475,5.103777777777778,84.119,69.41666666666667,9.093333333333334,28.288888888888888,9.3871,2.3124022222222216,291,10,58,6,5,92,50,72,0.061,0.82,0.11900000000000001,0.6505,0,0,2,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,7,4,1,0,0,14,11,5,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,1,3,2,0,0,5,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,7,3,7,9,5,8,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,7,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24914121849966636,0.0,0.0,0.28132349043988897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876824711754481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050540249328937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411418572664085,0.1753598301205479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282450278602199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25191731058291994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490082534160566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35976454899897026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15725079241336526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096252727995584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.377941004408908,0.24277058709491964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052192456179233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21454672166053065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16307565302010255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326715679977025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478127420627862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alyssaoftheeast,2020/03/31,"Wrote this poem and didn't know where else to post it Knife

Knife marks
Deep, jagged, bloodied
Not to kill, but to release
The toxins brewing inside
Large cracks in the dam that is my smiling face

And so it flows crimson red
Staining, soaking, pooling
An iron scented shroud
Enveloping me

Carrying me away
From the pain
The misery
That this life gave

And to a state of peace
Locked away from me, behind a iron door

But i found the key

A knife",3.990996677740864,5.8572959069767485,3.4711960132890383,92.05802325581396,72.48837209302326,5.84451827242525,25.07641196013289,6.1826913282559595,0.6264970099667777,352,11,70,2,7,104,64,86,0.098,0.787,0.115,0.1578,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,9,0,2,3,1,0,0,9,6,6,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,6,3,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,2,5,0,11,2,0,8,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,0,41,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6094775134435673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709539209794651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3556344979173511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3588466961135321,0.0,0.1782550114860514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290989404921325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3451326894714858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106389204456601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gabe076,2020/03/31,"I am 20 years old and I feel like a failure Can someone help me describe what emotions I am feeling. I think part of my problem is that I’m not even sure what I am experiencing, and I want to know what it is so I can finally begin the process of feeling better. I will keep this as short as I can. I am currently a sophomore attending a 4 yr university. I made the big mistake of not choosing a major when applying to universities because ultimately, I wasn’t sure of what I wanted to study. I spent the last 2 years of my life as a walking corpse. Not knowing what I wanted to study led me to a deep state of depression and it only got worse the further I progressed throughout college. It was tough seeing all of my friends find clubs and friends through their majors. Flashforward to the present time, I have finally settled on a major but I feel as if I denied myself access to that “enclave” forming period of my life. My major has less funding, less clubs, and less resources. Nothing compared to anything the college of engineering has.

I should add that I was a top performing student in high school. Not that high school matters much in the grand scheme of life, but I was in the top 10 of my high school class and was successful in many high school sports/extracurricular activities. Most of my other peers in the top 10 went on to good schools and good majors. I ended up going to UIUC (top 10 u.s engineering school) undecided. Ultimately, I developed a strong dislike towards myself for not applying myself in the time it mattered most. When I was 18 I wasn’t really sure of what I wanted to study and engineering wasn’t on my mind at all. Now that I am a little older and understands how the world works a bit more, I now know that with an engineering degree, had I chosen that major, I would be in a better financial situation post-grad than most.

To add to this, my younger brother got into the same school as I did for engineering. Now I feel as if I am living vicariously watching him succeed and do all the things I could have done (we have mostly the same h.s stats). It doesn’t help that he constantly makes jokes that belittle me since I am not in his program. I hate how he views our lives as a competition. To add to all of this, we come from a very poor family and I grew up watching my parents struggle financially (file for bankruptcy, having to wear hand me downs, only being able to eat as much as food stamps allowed for us). I guess I had always told myself that I would go to school to better myself, because I didn’t want to experience what I had to with my parents struggles. I never had the nicest things growing up and I still don’t. Now I feel guilty all the time because I feel like I’ve let myself down. I couldn’t transfer into engineering at my school due to the prestige of the program. And it doesn’t help that I go to a top engineering school where it is literally engineering or bust.

I’m not really sure what I am feeling. Is it guilt? Shame? Disappointment? Jealousy towards my brother? I’ve been working to accepting that I have made a mistake and have been trying to not lament over my past actions. But this is obviously easier said than done. And if it's not one thing or another. I felt some ease when I decided on a major, but now it's a new hurdle. All my friends are landing internships and I'm not because I'm a little late to even deciding what I wanted to study in the first place. This all just adds on to my low-self esteem and it makes me feel so shitty about myself. I'm literally useless.

Any insight or help is appreciated. I am really trying to not self-pity myself. I know that I need to get over myself. But it’s just hard for me to accept when I think I have truly experienced a “failure” in my life. I’m not sure of how to process/handle this. I will say I am in a better mental state than I was a few months ago. But I am constantly living with anxiety, an almost fear of the future. i want to land a good paying job. I don't want to move back home like my older sibling who went to college and has now been home for 5 years. But those months where I was truly depressed, well they were rough on me to say the least.",4.188094890954377,5.23960217921147,5.492771601563296,80.94974120648807,70.81600955794505,8.350800882894925,28.642832553712807,8.694712214485833,2.0959095599700297,3292,121,658,56,59,1103,330,837,0.11900000000000001,0.73,0.152,0.9777,5,0,0,0,0,0,81.0,4,0,2,17,25,40,1,5,46,0,68,8,2,9,14,134,121,49,0,20,27,4,13,3,3,5,4,3,2,0,46,30,2,1,24,3,4,13,22,14,1,2,32,22,108,26,107,79,32,107,0,4,4,0,26,51,0,13,44,469,154,25,0.05096263548380338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04517530144692102,0.0,0.05103171789958549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04240499525413358,0.0,0.0,0.03465633971222156,0.05343876681881271,0.03898627665424216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04193790670521047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039187120951291836,0.0,0.12426539829138222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802892386031192,0.05563799874144496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043899797929160635,0.0,0.11014500830009756,0.0,0.040689517566425804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877880865318371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430493989809082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052147498935827055,0.0,0.05732610553607088,0.045137768527041114,0.0,0.0,0.0673206801939796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04985123646621003,0.048043037175721816,0.057347133375321775,0.23191415780827665,0.07281543394489037,0.04893212207291953,0.1116541522771279,0.04657892556620916,0.04334879170824875,0.061624221117533226,0.0,0.11812081726950972,0.0,0.026625873635076756,0.0,0.08688972053952318,0.12823512221385233,0.08151895024349726,0.0,0.0561410885637371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04565251131173558,0.05031505171324314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663672127416915,0.21537928972594128,0.10223935725913227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05057255205401758,0.04529793200966123,0.0,0.0,0.1120309266953593,0.0415413498116492,0.057488072601886035,0.0,0.0,0.052112747606381786,0.14398566634558252,0.07469330842570833,0.10215589823899232,0.13500282243288855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644415583950054,0.06803590983357752,0.05166811347864528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05135835002788474,0.0,0.051457734024325436,0.0,0.08135577886253711,0.05416521630539832,0.07492680183317801,0.03778814846603073,0.039305526231930066,0.04922003091853952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04890002321658908,0.0,0.05347671310222241,0.0,0.034533600727198084,0.0775187614994787,0.0,0.0,0.11317595136693907,0.05518756795638551,0.04864960211169325,0.0,0.0,0.05324510723653297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04880811741988039,0.0,0.0,0.04876435950374049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794390779136057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04847713667119487,0.08105506645426319,0.0,0.5157690787486573,0.04061062232593236,0.0,0.10633028669483292,0.0,0.0,0.042156818705546086,0.05728413753451865,0.0,0.0,0.04318047566542358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04069882652848534,0.0,0.0,0.10655442356427362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401584041273371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015719315450604,0.06530959807398216,0.0,0.0,0.08915016774379214,0.0,0.0,0.04869698216053832,0.0,0.06920056843650199,0.0,0.0,0.05305390083251081,0.06130177562321136,0.0,0.0,0.042049511513091414,0.24047266243762264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04582152966641535,0.09448574733256476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742028111885361,0.0,0.05193527941775005,0.07240478811649964,0.0,0.0,0.0984547991277956
mentalhealth,cooldoubts,2020/03/31,"I’m scared my brain has been permanently damaged and that I won’t get better i went through some awful things a few months ago and it kinda broke my self esteem, and my trust for others. i thought i would learn from my experience and get better and learn to love myself, and for a while i really was doing better but in the last few weeks, everything has just gone downhill and i’ve gone back to being super anxious and scared of my past. i’ve become super emotionally vulnerable and everything just seems to hurt me and i have no control over what i should do and what i shouldn’t for my own sake. it doesn’t feel better having constant thoughts and crying about my experiences and not having anyone who understands. i’m just really lost",6.031458333333332,6.645208673611113,6.383333333333336,77.795,66.43055555555556,9.177777777777775,27.11111111111111,9.150863307647796,2.0644361111111107,595,16,111,10,9,192,88,144,0.19,0.657,0.153,-0.6301,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,8,5,14,0,2,3,1,15,2,1,1,0,31,29,15,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,8,13,0,1,7,0,0,3,5,6,0,0,8,1,17,8,12,16,4,13,0,4,0,1,3,2,0,3,8,80,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484631597097667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15910930745907118,0.0,0.09847872398706813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829739985301877,0.0,0.0,0.15554690634668733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49824675271416297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572242122339632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15219819313233449,0.1579642304291552,0.0,0.0,0.15470631721127073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15842623858417335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531561329752848,0.2755374295273693,0.0,0.0,0.07121302347993624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14716635534812358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507723186249311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480353906524972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374368658027687,0.0,0.1271137553237886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124172827697808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444788197451446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804516430867236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820111668199143,0.0,0.0,0.12821560433971582,0.14692701702926236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09356795308720113,0.0,0.0,0.2236227314696051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466195875773165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297349180898883,0.0,0.0,0.13056025182361272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004881833079864,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jtgancy,2020/03/31,"Hi everyone! Prospective counselor here seeking volunteer experience Has anyone volunteered with the crisis text line in the past? If so, what was your experience like? Best part? Worst part? Is it good experience if I am pursuing an MSW with the intention of becoming a counselor? Any input helps! I am looking into the process and I think it would be a good idea for me (esp since I am in quarantine w/ stay at home orders and have lots of free time to knock out the mandatory training!) thanks :)",2.806172161172164,5.820006824175827,3.8356318681318697,81.06978479853483,85.15384615384616,7.868498168498168,27.363553113553113,8.59863814320734,2.81798827838828,395,18,69,11,12,127,70,91,0.07400000000000001,0.6779999999999999,0.248,0.9534,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,2,7,0,0,8,0,9,0,0,1,0,13,12,5,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,6,7,11,9,5,9,0,0,1,0,3,5,0,3,3,48,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251347359829545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12866574233898231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032272288200728,0.0,0.0,0.19310965176807104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17583172534740216,0.0,0.5399982830347618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086817264454399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333962692106006,0.0,0.1845794316988528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077275914554532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989915945305169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452406379582842,0.0,0.0,0.15644075454432985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3985349753094843,0.17566064871460366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15221695142662334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19613272525542155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941388685498324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790771010446033,0.0,0.0,0.10729910502273313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071712304437055,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lost_nova,2020/03/31,"A way to cross check ingredients in different medicines? Husband keeps having bad allergic reaction. My husband started on Zoloft but developed a rash under his armpits that started spreading all over his body. It was a pretty bad reaction and we didn't see anything about a rash in the Zoloft packet so he went to the doctor who told him to get off it asap because it would spread to his organs (only on a couple weeks so no withdrawal quitting cold turkey.)


His doctor then proscribed Effexor. Same thing, but she told him to stop as soon as he said his armpits were itchy again.


Then he was put on buspirone, no rash but did not help at all after a few months. Now he is on Abilify, starting tomorrow morning.


I tried googling but am having trouble. Is there any way I can find a common denominator that might be in these medicines? There was a third medicine that caused a rash too but we can't remember the name. So we are just trying to research ourselves since this has not been going so well..



Thank you!",4.293125,6.355465395833337,4.4545833333333364,84.49875,72.125,7.300000000000002,29.1875,8.07648339933343,2.0323375,804,33,149,12,16,250,125,192,0.19899999999999998,0.7559999999999999,0.044000000000000004,-0.9866,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,3,1,0,1,13,5,0,0,12,0,19,12,7,1,2,23,31,14,0,1,8,2,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,10,4,0,2,2,0,1,4,6,3,1,1,11,3,15,2,21,17,4,31,0,0,1,0,24,11,0,1,14,106,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478181454440287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267972901713037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573059609016965,0.09392764805931164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17115162580926646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15828582230026095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17049005655627164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16098407962822928,0.0,0.31542123248345016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082919260613436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805020777289258,0.0,0.0875689956391694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327867648019644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369561687845377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16345785513246047,0.0,0.0,0.12298768715444595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718716631066715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1567579406987188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15489610725684036,0.0,0.16388637898980196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745461535914128,0.0,0.14656834468106042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278430822248708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274591603171755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3271825049478585,0.0,0.0,0.1288203990271818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185904764368035,0.0,0.0,0.10236598731475466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944660743741616,0.0,0.2092246667851008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446080388523719,0.12359619557611527,0.0,0.13853924169476045,0.14283660848636498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945623720722007,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheBrewParty,2020/03/31,"Interview with rapper Biz80 about music and mental health https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-brew-party/id1500801230?i=1000469757762

Chicago based rapper Biz80 joins The Party to talk about his debut album The Introverted Extrovert. Andy and Nick take a deep dive into Nick's music career, his influences, how he got started, his favorite artists, etc. The friend's share stories from their high school and college days, and share how Anxiety and Depression have impacted each of them, and how they overcame it to put themselves out there and try something new.",13.501411764705885,15.455108082352945,8.531764705882352,64.17294117647062,50.529411764705884,10.564705882352943,37.0,10.355215969177356,4.112811764705882,477,17,59,8,5,126,65,85,0.059000000000000004,0.831,0.11,0.5719,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,3,0,6,4,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,4,0,15,4,10,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,11,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,3,9,3,2,8,0,1,0,0,12,4,0,0,3,34,7,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19976056385508711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16840457366143122,0.0,0.2249073157317111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29122435311743833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20174518733045405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088462000351588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27756457239281906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.275893801939154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26315344374187233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521969773223372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625036070801176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26427330545975514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010274401439135,0.0,0.0,0.18482622372579235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19633414496771331,0.20988307046571664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772873143614757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31410225122070645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thelittlestgirllee,2020/03/31,"I called a suicide hotline on friday unlike all the other bad experiences, I was lucky enough to talk to someone great. I was in a horrible mindset whilst my SO was in the shower I went to the kitchen and pulled out all the kitchen knives trying to find the sharpest. I was cutting my thighs to figure which would be best. (ik extremely selfish of me to do that to my SO) i had the suicide hotline number saved on speed dial in case of emergencies. it was my first time calling I was greeted by a women named ""May"" she had a sweet southern accent and even sounded motherly. she was able to calm me down long enough for my boyfriend to get out of the shower and find me in the mess I made. she asked to talk to him so she could make sure that I would be safe and be able to get help if I had the thoughts get worse. my boyfriend was understanding but ofc a bit hurt. he had got in the shower thinking I was just having some anxiety that would pass and I had reassured him I could hold my own. anyways needless to say I'm sorry for the people that have experienced bad from these hotlines, I do hope you guys can get positive help in the future. 
thank you May",3.024433198380571,4.637769670940172,3.786662168241119,89.84985829959517,74.51282051282051,6.635717498875394,25.991003148897885,7.273561745256523,1.1017213675213675,909,32,192,10,19,289,126,234,0.11800000000000001,0.727,0.156,0.8296,3,0,0,0,0,2,16.0,0,2,0,2,6,17,1,0,17,0,29,3,1,2,3,35,44,10,2,7,3,1,0,0,0,5,0,2,5,2,8,7,2,2,6,0,0,3,0,6,0,1,18,4,32,11,31,16,8,20,0,1,0,0,22,11,0,6,6,138,40,0,0.2544067640602541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973102390820798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891799100380356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21241902141267824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349210161560002,0.0,0.13887314778979648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597777504869501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20312309983531293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628701944889793,0.0,0.08401663414723094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244293160407854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23252317338393544,0.10819913177294824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265834067939046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10173616485958684,0.14024217775560252,0.0,0.12595134709705966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705234912851587,0.0,0.0,0.12634166006796116,0.0,0.0,0.13617385134617474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257099023966896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036291572601307,0.0849092452555591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818680870021699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115723496026602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077790128035497,0.0,0.0,0.1423937718884519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782797079932358,0.0,0.11988768217320388,0.0,0.0,0.20448252019468635,0.0,0.1171117838599844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150679095745621,0.0,0.10098527657626742,0.074173315004268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863627465491643,0.0,0.0,0.13242320676157254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179188095380788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296311135776532,0.27108489885262943,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,houseofthel8scapegOt,2020/03/31,"I’m not doing well. I’d like to think that under different circumstances, I’d have things under control. I’ve been doing okay for months. I take my meds every day like I’m supposed to, I try to stick to a routine, I make time for little things that I enjoy. But god damn. Living alone is fucking lonely, and it’s quiet now more than ever. I’ve got no one to call, no one to tell that I’m not doing okay, but I need to say it. I feel like I’m going to combust. I am doing my best to hold myself together and I hate that I can’t always do it by myself. I hate that I don’t have a choice, that I’m always on my own - it was never an option. I am okay with it most days, am comfortable in my solitude. Some days I am suffocating.",0.27058333333333096,1.8578707250000013,3.0987500000000026,91.84458333333338,82.375,5.5166666666666675,17.541666666666664,6.42735559955562,-0.23159583333333345,556,11,129,5,15,197,87,160,0.124,0.7140000000000001,0.162,0.736,1,3,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,2,3,15,4,0,3,3,16,1,0,2,2,18,31,4,0,1,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,13,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,7,5,1,2,3,3,19,10,18,28,5,14,0,1,0,1,3,5,2,3,11,88,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17489848066231178,0.0,0.0,0.28102687909719337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772187369217827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17243523873138022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894021608933498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3267217058124011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17643329782497313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15275266088630593,0.14228033085935465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538578951832973,0.12064082326271255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15611767347741376,0.0,0.0,0.09597276155206906,0.0,0.13506083444247222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334484975141761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24750418235543545,0.16925219005110026,0.1491153798833364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272209377976852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18757659663843876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347904916227502,0.0,0.0,0.12521502910951082,0.13024302092281725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22886148148801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13429227042795602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696928861729148,0.0,0.14759989851523922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22437956310661786,0.10820513250755627,0.0,0.0,0.09846950523117512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465170354880665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183448789982973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anniehall330,2020/03/31,"Please help me with your advice. My brother is ruining me with his bullying and it will eventually lead to my suicide. My brother is ruining my mental health, and he does everything that will lead me eventually to suicide. I need help. I tried with it many times

What do you think of my brother? It’s going to be long. Please help me, I can’t deal with this anymore. Be honest.

I suffer from severe depression and anxiety. My brother also suffers from it.
He is really abusive towards me whenever I disagree with him, he calls me awful names really hurting my feelings.
I often listen to him for hours about his problems, I try to calm him down, not to think about the worst scenario. But it’s too much for me. I have many problems in myself. I suffer from suicidal thoughts every other day. I feel fucking hopeless and I have many stress issues right now. I stayed alone in my apartment and didn’t go home to the family. 
And I have to repress all these feelings because whenever I tried to share anything with him he betrayed me, made fun of me, increased my fear and anxiety, and even victim blamed me.
Examples:

When I told him I was sexually harassed by a 40ish married man when I was 17, he made fun of me, how I am a w***** and even told everything to my parents who are really conservative and it just created so much shame in me yet I shouldn’t feel guilty.

He often made fun of me how I am a feminazi and nobody will have sex with  me and I will stay a virgin forever just because I don’t have a boyfriend. He made me so upset that I told him how I was basically raped when I lost my virginity. He laughed about it, told my parents again: She was raped. She was raped.

He always calls me cringe whenever I post something on facebook. How pitiful I am, this basically creates anxiety in me. How I am not going to find a boyfriend: just because I posted a photo with a sketch about a guy on a wall and me together and the title was: me and my boyfriend ( it was supposed to be sarcastic) and he also said now: women don’t behave like that.

Some days ago I shared a post on Facebook, how it sucks to be alone and your mind can just basically go crazy and I envy the people who spend their quarantine time with someone they love. And he just made fun of me again. How I am behaving like a celebrity, like I am Kim Kardashian. How pathetic I am, they will use it against me.


I once shared a post with a really dear friend of mine on Instagram and I mentioned how she has always stood by me even when everybody bullied me. And I got it again: how I am behaving like a celebrity, you are not a star to share your bully story. Every bullied person deserved it. 

I mentioned him once that I was dropped out of a group ( in one of the university groups because they created an official one for us newbies and their group chat was basically a private group chat) and he tried to plant the idea in me that they threw me out because they talked about me or laughed at me. It made me anxious again and sad.


He blamed me for other things like: he accidentally sent a mail to a lady containing the text: die rat and he wanted to send me.

He blamed me when a married man ( I didn’t know) hit on me, talked for a week on whatsapp and his wife found me and I stopped talking to the man and told everything to his wife because she asked me. And how I ruined other people’s lives.

Yesterday was my birthday, his friend sent me a Happy Birthday message on Facebook. I texted him: Thank you, have a good day ( but if you talk to my brother it won’t be hahaha) just being sarcastic. The guy also laughed it off. And on my fucking 25th birthday that I spent alone without any cakes, friends, loved ones I had to talk to him for 2 hours because how he was insulted and I ruined his friendship and now his friend behaves odd.

I just can’t deal with this anymore, it’s really toxic, I blocked him everywhere but he is sending me nasty mails containing every swearing you would describe the shittiest person on Earth.

My mental health is really bad now, his behaviour really hurt me. He is selfish, he only cares about himself, he just ruins me. And I can’t cut the contact because he is 23 and still lives with my mom ( she and my father also endured a lot : including: putting a gun to my mom’s head, breaking my father’s finger, constantly verbally or physically abusing them) plus he always blackmails me(e.g.: he uploaded my lost photos from my really old Iphone to a computer and he threatened me to share my private ones on the internet and I will commit suicide, he threatened to curse me, he made up a story  about him being involved in the mob and he was smuggling stuffs and he lied about it that he needs money or he will be killed and I loaned money from a bank and he even created panic in me how the mobs know about me and they are going to kill me if I mention anything to anyone: I escaped to my friend’s dorm she was also scared, I cried and had panic attacks 6 times a day that I will be assasinated, it was exam period I couldn’t do my exams I was a f-ing mess and still suffer from it) when I talk to my mom he just takes aways the phone and doesn’t let us talk on the phone. I rely on him now as well because he has to send my medicine via the post office and I don’t want my mom to do it because she has diabetes and she is 60 so I don’t want to endanger her.

He doesn’t go to college, he doesn’t work, he just does nothing, he sometimes goes out with his friends and that’s all. 
Oh and yeah my parents far from perfect but he can’t take responsibilities for his mistakes. It’s always somebody else who is to be blamed.


Please help me what to do or what you think about him. Am I wrong here?
Whenever I talk anything about him to a friend he calls me a traitor.
If he knew I posted this here, he would destroy me.

I am not a US citizen. I am from Europe.",3.072510843804501,4.66608361682243,4.4204843715065065,85.43691445691546,74.34409515717927,7.436673076063138,27.34274471224791,8.136872180373857,1.7495361427357694,4575,176,931,73,95,1514,403,1177,0.20600000000000002,0.7040000000000001,0.09,-0.9993,3,4,1,1,0,6,125.0,3,9,9,6,70,82,14,8,52,2,91,15,2,23,4,157,148,89,7,15,26,16,5,5,7,12,3,2,2,9,46,66,0,6,14,2,6,16,21,47,1,4,43,7,200,35,119,80,8,94,0,17,0,10,189,33,3,11,40,642,246,8,0.0,0.09686982587062852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03994647126674543,0.03623675392370337,0.0,0.0,0.1270149007737067,0.0,0.1634545486600736,0.13605836188744044,0.0,0.0,0.02779911176738002,0.0,0.09381693546734364,0.04618161758738292,0.08108193770593944,0.028583536967717017,0.0,0.10091976522641563,0.0,0.0382163329475864,0.0465057471991886,0.03840715229247554,0.0,0.034132245164012864,0.2491944998090717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252260434419899,0.0,0.0416788498997941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04417566052530384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04490364576340775,0.10545425459826176,0.08428887759670935,0.035209010091771895,0.0,0.04242593272586324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154695093470029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03414914669617343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800073686422901,0.0,0.10332692449766544,0.0,0.11021818814062148,0.0,0.03853706915336188,0.046000223436095417,0.0826785728657067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03736265192953695,0.0,0.0,0.044821697341372,0.2210810181741894,0.0755839262893745,0.0,0.0,0.1393948162311445,0.03428735333398353,0.032694658867556514,0.0,0.0,0.08095324475678868,0.0,0.043516439935954485,0.0,0.0,0.04195363244987252,0.08690489945782758,0.0,0.0,0.10960128847333178,0.0,0.04100495527041225,0.0,0.0805151320455043,0.0,0.08752359837014237,0.0461473985354906,0.0,0.04266703990297485,0.0,0.0,0.09045308089818636,0.0,0.04493204242670168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04180153204996986,0.0,0.09985703656933932,0.0,0.0721937858198019,0.03617661555601867,0.0,0.0,0.08924848273821091,0.034753851409759534,0.07378976041322323,0.2707647897656069,0.0,0.124334624486845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239280457594939,0.0,0.04127612180965198,0.19150789382002412,0.0,0.0,0.060101515504198365,0.06062249916825967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03922448885581685,0.0,0.04289561843014093,0.08706957028236881,0.11080263343643416,0.03109031035716878,0.0,0.09592536263342057,0.13617382624165011,0.0,0.0,0.056680682450560536,0.07138790628159412,0.0,0.13461855021352598,0.0,0.0,0.2349046072223569,0.0,0.0,0.07823133610564922,0.0,0.04109467102366572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20950499771836867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03491043004105969,0.03888527616232547,0.0,0.04092699562783002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04618161758738292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03463663154157129,0.031470640008852996,0.04043036168118959,0.0,0.0,0.08714311830024557,0.06529202084590541,0.03417666210540358,0.04682673948356044,0.0,0.04679665789507966,0.1788598997251218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061471818904937074,0.26285583897803144,0.0,0.0376358773495912,0.0,0.0,0.027158181359182024,0.07858080937357517,0.0,0.0324533480583211,0.07151059511101178,0.0,0.0,0.1953081111646539,0.0,0.11101659045973346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751715786253744,0.035306318114894264,0.0,0.0,0.07233445390814179,0.0,0.03279065618192162,0.0,0.036755117104874016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03940588300710435,0.0,0.029760388125415257,0.0,0.0,0.05807851648667421,0.04469475307583178,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigLow6,2020/03/31,"help needed Hi everyone, I have anxiety and ocd.

​

I’ve been dealing with irrational worries that plague my mind and take over everything I’m thinking. I’ve had some amazing days and memories basically ruined because of anxiety. My latest is that I sold my soul.

​

As many ocd sufferers know, if you just comply with the urge, the urge goes away. Myself and friends were talking about rappers who sold their soul, and when I was alone I felt compulsed to say “I sell my soul to the devil” so I did, to be rid of the compulsion.

​

Now my anxiety wrecks havoc thinking I have. I think every good thing that happens to me is because I sold my soul.

​

The thing is, I know god owns all souls as it’s said in the bible. I’m also spiritual but not a strict Christian. My brain can’t seem to accept facts or rational thoughts. Can anyone help me? I’m usually so happy and I have great days ahead, I want to enjoy life again! Please help me.",2.9829669030732866,5.3236365638297904,3.860992907801421,85.98388888888887,76.97872340425532,6.943735224586287,26.933806146572103,7.984000788550335,1.8085451536643016,766,31,146,13,18,245,117,188,0.09,0.7070000000000001,0.203,0.9818,0,1,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,1,1,8,10,0,0,7,0,14,2,1,0,2,28,33,15,0,3,5,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,7,8,0,0,9,0,4,0,2,3,0,0,11,3,25,7,17,21,3,11,7,2,0,0,12,3,0,4,8,90,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900320567182988,0.0,0.07644390162294723,0.0,0.4142902232850936,0.46461297806118707,0.0,0.0,0.2193800247292786,0.0,0.0,0.06683928669798361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898106720042816,0.0,0.0,0.11654248832193766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106710909442231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329627303605073,0.0985498831285413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053934377121251,0.0913410740687534,0.08591081741427672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178212670077332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07385318925723962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017699986511614,0.0,0.10538915779171333,0.0,0.0,0.08453059933146749,0.10175814869377088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922174279291756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506837096739276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751858550060344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691403390639852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651942453910298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087934230868584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492995650784484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092870923144993,0.07601761444106643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870222438985182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187236016791985,0.07683223738866997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701251577874167,0.18375211061570354,0.0,0.07588839119628467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527972459812383,0.0,0.056381910892377186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707706370685026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46461297806118707,0.0
mentalhealth,DullAppointment4,2020/03/31,"Any tips to deal with conflict during Quarantine for COVID 19? I dunno. I'm just on here to ask how to keep everyone calm and prevent bickering over dumb stuff during quarantine/social distancing in our houses. I feel like everyone's on edge, and any small issue is largely magnified. 

Also do any of you feel the pressure related to this quarantine? How are all of you managing?",4.8581904761904715,7.198496342857148,5.985714285714287,72.92761904761906,71.28571428571428,10.380952380952381,31.666666666666664,10.504223727775694,4.144952380952383,304,14,49,10,6,101,53,70,0.114,0.8059999999999999,0.081,-0.5329999999999999,0,3,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,2,0,0,5,4,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,2,1,13,8,5,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,5,2,12,8,1,5,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,1,1,31,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957858779631848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4994666910700654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288776409103456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524030692030868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46788015789301096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24758101120390444,0.17490250534863336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824943335210091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555329275316359,0.0,0.21761105761171556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11960877036336336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802652121595246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,practicallycrazy,2020/03/31,Can panic attacks cause short term amnesia? I’m not sure if that’s the proper term for it or if this is even the proper sub to post this to.. but can panic attacks cause a brief loss of memory? Ex. Someone coming out of a panic attack and not remembering what triggered it?,1.5651515151515127,3.9563648181818216,3.6468181818181833,85.24356060606063,82.63636363636363,5.848484848484849,20.075757575757574,7.1686216300943375,0.6903939393939393,215,6,41,3,6,73,40,55,0.377,0.623,0.0,-0.9776,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,1,8,3,3,4,0,3,0,0,3,1,14,5,5,0,2,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,5,2,7,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,3,2,27,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5919344885135512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3563385268938364,0.0,0.14940203465459267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11455458874254547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6104786385077305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16610627825570545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964721740136761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14695400038463816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16346386957827222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DizzySeaweed,2020/03/31,"How do I overcome random unprovoked paranoia? I feel like replacing my spine and shoulders with a rake, because I have no backbone. 

I have no diagnosed illness, maybe anxiety who knows. I blame my internet usage personally. I think everyone has different things that they are immune or allergic to, and should seek ways of self-identifying those weaknesses to better help themselves in their lives. Maybe it’s the isolation, but sometimes I catch myself seeing patterns in things and making delusional guesses to justify my poor work ethic.

Social distancing had become part of my life prior to Covid, but now it feels accentuated and purposeful. 

I don’t enjoy turning my back on life to make sure that danger isn’t following. I feel like I’m walking head first into that tree over there because I was trying to count my footsteps.",6.879369202226343,8.98449766666667,6.9605936920222655,68.96070500927645,65.53061224489797,10.243413729128015,35.13234384662956,10.436869588844218,4.3276993197278895,675,32,100,18,11,216,108,147,0.153,0.733,0.114,-0.4404,1,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,3,4,7,1,0,2,0,10,10,3,3,1,21,22,8,0,1,3,0,3,2,0,1,7,0,0,1,9,6,0,0,5,0,1,3,4,2,0,1,2,4,19,5,14,19,1,13,0,0,1,0,6,5,0,3,6,69,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597375407709865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662272885118933,0.0,0.2007652444408017,0.18186746655699065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456391463588598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16713877926865392,0.0,0.17204736180144806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573513087539485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24978958059043355,0.23528365250526506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007005784688342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18140495300618256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16900114730524998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11037627981473526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049951431444918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2326256375250946,0.1609010019991433,0.0,0.14540853698942444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21983989519692065,0.0,0.3308706426410733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17832390549904947,0.0,0.0,0.14378538115530606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122239384838175,0.0,0.1717889798227854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16786253267010304,0.0,0.0,0.16286498000503935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520156494756562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218801736126654,0.10551527297171064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180158940962596,0.17911602669790075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13070909824488333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198832960043249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,charflower,2020/03/31,Help please ... Is anyone else completely losing it over covid19? I have serious mental health issues and I spend 90%of my time chain smoking through anxiety attacks. This has made it so much worse and I feel like I'm just existing waiting to die from this horrible virus. I feel like I can't clean enough even though it's all I do and I have young children.  I feel so useless to them... I also feel like something's going to happen and they won't have me. I'm trying so hard not to focus on it  but nothing is working . I feel like I'm suffocating...,0.9532077922077916,3.471867463636368,2.4924675324675327,91.18727272727274,88.0,5.324675324675325,22.402597402597397,6.868970318607317,0.7944415584415578,431,16,87,6,14,140,72,110,0.172,0.718,0.11,-0.5656,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,2,7,8,1,0,0,0,9,1,0,1,1,15,21,10,1,0,3,0,6,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,6,4,0,1,5,0,1,1,3,4,0,0,1,6,14,4,8,19,3,5,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,0,6,53,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467305295427665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926295780091202,0.0,0.0,0.10900879930260313,0.15973781873591256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735858471887544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634580256023795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16179942989430368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023431924336984,0.0,0.0,0.1610862187175022,0.0,0.10297037996612134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3941382397113168,0.4454995332250902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860147692432181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786172164118382,0.0,0.13965564289106686,0.0,0.0,0.16571424932664436,0.0,0.0,0.10449638258545428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627189383480637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30465916574660284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17441205344164742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14751620666472853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15711037979908246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146043271128235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959010979852305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711312184027182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001932037046745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531708101375541,0.0,0.09090645569009637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584576396504423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134969468612294,0.0,0.15887526507109326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nelssyc,2020/03/31,Is it bad wanting to be dead? I’m 22 years old and I think I wanna be death but not cause I’m depressed I just think is so beautiful to think about not being alive. Is it wrong that I think that way?,-2.0970476190476184,-0.28111302222221823,0.2904761904761912,104.43000000000002,101.44444444444444,3.4603174603174613,13.095238095238097,5.288315135182226,-1.412142857142857,154,3,40,1,7,51,29,45,0.256,0.56,0.184,-0.2723,0,0,0,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,12,13,3,2,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,4,10,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233811415226839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876655635390214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411874296207415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938419434170789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7177217188036074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516758035941642,0.22227293739916465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3061663075387843,0.0,0.1803286442278074
mentalhealth,FoxyAsh_,2020/03/31,"I think I might be autistic Recently I've started to realize just how socially distant I am. I (15F) have always had a hard time socializing with others, and I get super nervous going to hang out with a group of people larger than 10 (sometimes smaller depending on the people). I can never keep a conversation going and most of my conversations are the other person talking for most of the time and me not knowing how to respond. I also have a hard time focusing on the bigger picture of some projects I have to do for school, several times I've had to ask a friend what we're doing because I didnt understand anything the teacher said about how to do it. Another thing that's been happening recently is I've been getting stressed over some events that have been happening because I have no control over what's to come. Loud noises have also stressed me out on my worse days to the point I just have to distance myself to my room for a while to calm down and try to get rid of my headache. I could just be overreacting and I'm just really stressed from lockdowns and online schooling due to the corona virus but I dont know. I just need some advice.",9.043451327433633,6.8257009557522155,8.939929203539823,71.22077876106195,61.56637168141593,11.871858407079651,39.8566371681416,10.355215969177356,4.037613805309737,920,39,171,16,10,301,127,226,0.062,0.9079999999999999,0.03,-0.3612,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,11,7,0,4,13,0,25,0,0,5,1,38,43,13,0,2,7,0,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,8,11,0,2,5,0,0,4,5,4,0,0,7,4,21,3,34,32,5,27,0,0,0,0,11,11,0,7,12,127,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776414289292493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19274878821076646,0.10027666939650598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12636863938157614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991721277329931,0.0,0.11266361086141145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469275044981334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038114848765782,0.0,0.0,0.13516584557249886,0.09622001550664176,0.0,0.0,0.0777210696800327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412406191838254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310822990855942,0.0,0.18888958094889585,0.0,0.13698090249791545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21313891941615973,0.0,0.2159123827979164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071177045358925,0.0,0.0,0.13246184949542775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278455025833521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935904008773295,0.0929472397247996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670974125049455,0.10522751233812952,0.0,0.0,0.11392396466959168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772038671555544,0.0,0.23798457040454815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463568803943655,0.0,0.0,0.2439316645817948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361456579298518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24569614220480304,0.0,0.0,0.11919067540265772,0.0,0.08529989121179986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4141425261016103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968639769672782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006364138995087,0.07722001777426213,0.0,0.0,0.2810889564279456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182057893852697,0.0,0.0,0.12545853246990066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281328680684675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SirRettfordIII,2020/03/31,"Everything I do is wrong While this may sound like an overdramatization, I genuinely feel as if every decision, action, or hell, even sentence I say is wrong on some degree. I don't mean that what I do or choose is morally or inherently bad, I mean, if life were a serious of multiple choice answers I keep picking the wrong options. 

Say what I think is a funny joke to friends or family? It was either some how disrespectful or poorly received, or no one understood the joke.

State a cool fact I found online? No one believes me and everyone disregards what I have to say because ""I found it on the internet"".

Share a piece of writing I make with friends? Even though it's all constructive criticism, I can only feel like what I've made is terrible.

Make a commitment with some friends several days ago? Well, my father decides today to do some intensive yard work, and I chose to hang out with my friends.

Play D&D with my friends, but one friend keeps forgetting the rules and stats? Sure I'll help and give them pointers. Nope, they turn it into a huge argument and now everyone thinks I'm a rules lawyer and am trying to kill the fun of the game.

Ask for help with my taxes from my parents? Why would we know how to do your taxes, go take it to HR block or someone.

I take my car to get fixed at my local shop? Turns out the place 3 miles down had a sale going on for 30% of what I just paid.

A lot of the time it feels like I'm supposed to know things before I ever encounter them. Honestly, I just can't get the thoughts out of my head I'm always wrong. I mean even now, as I'm writing this, I can't help but think to myself I'm wasting the free time I have from this virus by being lazy or watching TV. How do I stop these thoughts? How do I keep myself sane amidst all the failures I have?",3.5425814000813998,4.764727590659343,4.450195360195362,87.16887871387871,72.54395604395604,7.9200651200651215,26.943019943019944,8.401726058763845,1.6616586487586495,1409,49,299,23,27,456,194,364,0.134,0.698,0.168,0.8645,2,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,1,1,3,1,14,28,2,0,21,1,25,2,1,8,6,82,63,26,1,3,15,2,3,3,6,2,1,4,1,0,17,16,0,6,20,7,7,6,6,9,1,3,10,9,40,20,37,50,9,30,2,0,1,0,26,13,1,17,13,188,57,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07531012351650658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069184550008872,0.09205193622324798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942424315076549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093636490204662,0.05178959627501123,0.0,0.07229298383406496,0.09571855076602497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479086893280824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834183430676553,0.0768493571703336,0.07158076265959185,0.1623619820534131,0.07635475462392498,0.0,0.08009082281526922,0.0,0.12887192271267287,0.12138799628688415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18630408066381365,0.39382994926506587,0.0,0.08877407645186586,0.08149943621482053,0.09656715619019916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719139822563653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708366301905911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265436695778205,0.09399341769455592,0.0,0.0933813683236777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06000833403310572,0.12451853342928837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222823677457636,0.0,0.0803892952131372,0.11342022319751108,0.0,0.0,0.27763244068703113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727091786619787,0.06461437241577332,0.0,0.0,0.09433578308887236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876300709015493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026859878339092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959783354773086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198462105859829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102867574615271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007189105138582,0.0,0.12775565615679765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05644230708274926,0.16331293008229242,0.08347078434689277,0.13489429301213518,0.09907936312191612,0.0,0.08053023150385445,0.0,0.0,0.05768089187505166,0.18481977266346356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638742738546145,0.0,0.07666136290492817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06185042154557159,0.0,0.0,0.06035171168306304,0.3715528583788395,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw_away1840,2020/03/31,"I feel empty and meaningless It’s been about 5 months and I’ve been feeling some type of way. I feel like there’s nothing to live for, not that I want to die, I just wish I was never born. Everyday feels the same and my life feels like a dead end (I’m a teenager). I’ve talked to teacher in what was probably February, they told my mom about my situation and advised me to see a doctor. Idk if we were actually going to do that or not but now we can’t cause of isolation. 

I once saw some comments on YouTube about how that feel this way but they don’t know if it’s true or not, like if they’re faking it. And I feel the same. I know i should be able to tell if I’m sad or not but I just tell my self it’s not true, now idk",0.1933333333333352,1.7124531481481462,2.388666666666669,97.17300000000002,82.33333333333334,6.048395061728398,19.441975308641968,7.0316486544052195,-0.01893135802469148,558,14,144,7,15,189,88,162,0.138,0.746,0.11599999999999999,-0.5372,0,1,0,0,0,1,14.0,2,0,2,0,9,7,0,0,5,0,10,2,0,2,3,45,27,16,2,7,17,1,7,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,9,7,0,0,9,0,0,1,8,2,0,0,7,9,19,5,14,18,4,12,0,1,2,0,12,2,0,9,10,88,28,3,0.1523982162708943,0.0,0.1487186753734037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655494813093113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15816528791382528,0.0,0.0,0.1559860320186096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13497958542893235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5393998204042918,0.21774663230906066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866114183250214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750814820962512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764336710282944,0.22336221161614414,0.0,0.13457041703195308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784869490055395,0.12164280226363475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753889944013432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462301987145451,0.0,0.0,0.1622991265887803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643110529172892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144164730432737,0.0,0.15898457638651134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17130198032344188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249191349671301,0.26640551648809946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14562302652892042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988841645820518,0.2419332210455259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17525042763021495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alkkine,2020/03/31,"Anxiety that completely disappears? For the majority of my life I have had severe anxiety. Social situations, unknown places or at some points it was so bad it was at one point told to me that it seemed like i was agoraphobic by a therapist I was talking to at the time.

For the last 6months or so, my anxiety has completely disappeared. 

I don't know why, it even took me some time to realize that it was gone. But at some point I started doing things out of character for me and afterwards I would sit to myself driving home and think about it. I didn't panic, sweat, clench my teeth, have a million thoughts in my head, no flushed face, no heart rate increase even. Not even a flutter in the most stressful situations.

I just don't feel anything. I don't do any substances and have not been on medication for anxiety or depression. I am depressed but I have been for as long as I can remember and am I chronic pain patient.

The very few people in my life have all noticed a dramatic change as well. I don't feel human anymore, I say and do things that I would have been nervous to do without a thought and barely notice things I have never done before. I feel like I could lie about anything or just plain hurt others and I wouldn't notice right now, I have no motivation to do that but it is how I at the moment.

Any insight? Is it just years of depression catching up to me? Or am I just displacing my feelings in some way?",3.42902903671839,5.147765201413428,4.636257489629745,83.73831310493166,73.66431095406361,8.17262252266093,29.26547856813643,8.841846274778883,2.3549371332001847,1124,48,225,23,23,370,140,283,0.155,0.795,0.05,-0.9767,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,1,14,12,0,3,11,0,39,10,5,2,2,48,52,21,0,4,15,0,4,2,0,3,5,1,1,1,17,8,0,0,13,0,0,7,13,9,1,2,16,5,34,3,34,32,9,36,0,4,0,0,5,17,0,11,12,177,51,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325667812763574,0.0,0.2982591498651477,0.0,0.09666470273646756,0.0,0.0,0.16042009489586506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138392904406004,0.0,0.0,0.08294035188946049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311103324007104,0.0,0.20439226333873647,0.0,0.0,0.07782239007725691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518540077206694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974632540779824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931353533168351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19713637574188053,0.06963305837742029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003301658107457,0.0,0.0,0.11550320040413868,0.0,0.0,0.0977710184063891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434435656384224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05356732519481102,0.07945159644865071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13769281822507448,0.09523848126202518,0.0,0.0,0.0862584661313009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09819143466739537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517538121752193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33291297444475315,0.0,0.0,0.06604864120536495,0.0,0.10371565353563984,0.11436081729418528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757388235903246,0.0,0.10183609324692283,0.0,0.276423834614305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041525605560494,0.08323941034956507,0.0,0.07751258034755487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873362735472053,0.0,0.11011410092747663,0.0,0.0,0.2191222095063113,0.0,0.09935906224115884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899023423015402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11165231074552387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834322370756236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131709478318392,0.19426552464515912,0.062455262695177274,0.0,0.1547616315849801,0.11367185038561282,0.0,0.0,0.09313739183798156,0.10829348873424413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042350175785963,0.0,0.07736767235320145,0.0,0.0,0.08763782833785046,0.0,0.0879521092981127,0.0,0.0,0.09395823717890088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13848071939080325,0.0,0.0,0.0627679087961091
mentalhealth,SomeDeepSeaShrimp,2020/03/31,"Do I want a ""way out""? Why? Days ago I noticed my roommate had thrown out a lot of random old pills. She takes different types of medications. Since when I saw them in the trash, I've had this thought in the back of my head that I have to retrieve them, stash them somewhere to keep ""just in case"". Like a ""way out"".

I haven't explored the root of this thought because I don't understand it and I don't wanna admit to myself that I would want this. My life is fine right now. I've been suicidal for a year, time ago, but I've been okay the last few years. I don't wanna kill myself. I have a nice life, a loving partner. My family is so-so, but not so terrible to think about this. 
I've been going to therapy for other issues like depressive and anxiety attacks, but I can't go since we are in isolation. I just keep thinking about those pills every day, I don't know why.",2.0533150183150184,3.503209862637366,3.6002417582417583,90.86142490842494,76.74725274725273,7.0511355311355315,23.122344322344322,7.793537801064563,0.9111658608058604,673,20,152,10,15,223,99,182,0.092,0.7440000000000001,0.16399999999999998,0.9184,1,1,0,0,0,1,29.0,1,0,3,0,8,10,2,0,10,1,18,7,1,1,0,30,34,7,2,5,6,0,0,2,1,1,5,0,0,1,9,6,0,2,8,0,0,3,7,4,0,0,8,1,24,6,22,25,2,25,0,1,1,1,8,8,0,2,14,97,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526982749321424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090392818754031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215472992433308,0.0,0.1096010158956403,0.0,0.0868883293974348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18384723613312184,0.0,0.12276563362977215,0.0,0.0,0.14891928018518905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009232223899717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13436980194886042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16201244032628329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628256396173994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14877004991456932,0.0,0.2533842367445903,0.1576944333465646,0.0,0.07833379360021987,0.11618547192308665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013541046496083,0.13927130964344964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12117860111015015,0.12864387082889636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435895398654385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622776330667383,0.1495670501042526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172455439978665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23581370842727686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591072330263758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10716897150145667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16300178803618398,0.0,0.0,0.18266201044831867,0.0,0.22631456138088896,0.08311360735185838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483845020331368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16814228411327045,0.2262761209526359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572322717778608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125314313267174,0.0,0.0,0.1835764020126255
mentalhealth,Bea_theIdiot,2020/04/01,"What do you guys do when you are feeling small? I’m currently feeling incredibly small and like a waste of space, I won’t do anything reckless but I really want suggestions as my normal things have not been working. Thank you in advance",4.186333333333334,6.5259164666666685,4.793055555555559,80.73625000000003,73.22222222222223,8.055555555555555,31.25,8.841846274778883,2.849333333333333,191,9,34,4,4,61,37,45,0.14,0.722,0.13699999999999998,-0.2832,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,3,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,7,12,4,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,6,2,3,10,0,7,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,23,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238667088238058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3979919675426004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896867113568147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19227375161280272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3856056706762549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25212489573137736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.362337576892759,0.0,0.0,0.26146406884831125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321321444737689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28651668780263284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,highbagel-,2020/04/01,"Marijuana Induced Psychosis I doubt this will go anywhere. Let alone I’ll finish it. I’m not saying my name, but I’m sure you’ll figure it out. 
At the time of writing this I’m 18, I’ve been smoking weed consistently for the past 3 years, I’ve come across times where I often feel disconnected from the world when I’m sober, not just when I’m high. I’ve thought it’s been a problem before, I’ve been to therapist to try and figure it out. I’ve been to doctors who say it’s limes disease because I got bit by a tick four years ago. 

I’m not starting to come across what is called Marijuana Induced Psychosis, a mental illness that causes one to feel distant from reality. I’m not trying to self diagnose myself, I know I shouldn’t. But I do fear that this is happening. I feel like I should stop but I know I have an addictive personality. When I was 12 I heavily vaped, spending hundreds of dollars on devices, juice and pods. At first it wasn’t for the nicotine, I simply tried it from a buddy, thought it was cool, bought my own that didn’t have nicotine but through hanging out with my buddies, I slowly developed an addiction.

Now all I do is smoke weed, but I smoke it heavily. Hell, the second I turned 18 I went and spent the $200 to get my medical cart and I said “I have anxiety” which in the past I used to and I still kind of do now I guess, but I can manage it find. I just wanted to get dispensary weed. 

The reason I write all this is because I constantly feel disconnected from reality and strongly feel that this is the reason why. In a few months I plan on moving down to Florida for college and I hope I’m able to go down and just completely stop smoking. 

A side note:
As a kid I grew up loving to be outside and hanging out with my buddies (this is back when my parents were together) now I just sit inside getting high all the time unless I’m going to school or work. But even when I’m at school, or work, I’m high. 

Part of me doesn’t want to post this,
Part of me does. 
I fear if I don’t, I mentally won’t set a goal for myself to stop this and better myself before it gets worse. 
If anyone else feels this way, please reach out. 
To those who have read this,
Thank you. 
I hope I can do this. 
I hope I can better myself. 
For my own mental health.",1.94868230673832,3.6287264788135616,3.6747560975609774,89.22088466308392,77.64406779661016,6.638776353865234,23.800330715171558,7.499876790926021,0.9533136006614301,1766,58,386,24,41,591,213,472,0.087,0.813,0.1,0.7015,1,1,2,0,0,0,52.0,0,2,0,8,17,17,1,3,20,1,35,8,0,6,4,79,82,28,0,10,20,1,6,1,0,5,7,3,0,3,31,19,0,3,17,1,4,10,10,5,0,4,16,10,53,12,53,59,9,63,1,0,0,1,16,23,1,10,27,245,84,9,0.08129288283165755,0.0,0.0,0.17724248313337387,0.0,0.0,0.07206123569838747,0.0,0.0,0.08419490996289512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062188832857812924,0.0,0.0,0.056841873829567374,0.08329416520947057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250920898735307,0.0,0.09911077368183906,0.0,0.13834851157200506,0.0,0.0,0.14379389733709974,0.08875077338011017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300912246030362,0.0,0.0,0.0835101838232908,0.0,0.14005324079139875,0.08523404098717352,0.08784872651530633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251056487239203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320671025259109,0.07113994958905367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790977233096128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05369318241887205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18295418790470874,0.24662474482509186,0.05807565173802218,0.0,0.0,0.07430022216338776,0.06914768460811947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16988870415814505,0.0,0.138601856125353,0.0,0.06501734464665261,0.0,0.08955327547971985,0.0,0.07188702781416638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641053302347174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576711820018773,0.0,0.24222652585359755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465402778332222,0.08935288482345355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312748045669109,0.0,0.039715596289427516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337000064162186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818940270078609,0.24577231681263725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06488720349688723,0.08640146925026168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05508616128307508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026612602048384,0.1760645403461684,0.15520651028848573,0.0,0.07098180967593973,0.0,0.08923517355461008,0.0,0.0,0.07785611032437924,0.0,0.0,0.07778631002625988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131488184026707,0.0,0.0,0.1671652457229208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732814745575999,0.12929472657026875,0.0,0.16454547489103838,0.0,0.0,0.08480620611238557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575395208804189,0.0,0.06492060123965937,0.2038934703047985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766175800070866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484356446813104,0.0,0.09438730261595127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907493693041455,0.14220760115755773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16557759371315842,0.08842331268189396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07021094981842196,0.0,0.0,0.0958972970401582,0.06452650651953734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535931682348844,0.07335418245650363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836437379001673,0.0,0.08284439265073625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469990250345856
mentalhealth,pindropinthesilence,2020/04/01,"why do I feel like such a fake/imposter? first post, so dont really know what im doing, but wondered if anyone on here has felt similar feelings to me or has any insight into why I may feel this way. all my life I have felt like im just waiting for people to realise the real me and that if they 'really knew me' they would hate me. even those who have shown unwavering love and acceptance in spite of knowing all my deepest darkest secrets; even then, when I told them and the response was positive, I still thought they would hate me only if they knew.. but they did know and they didnt hate me.. I found/find this hard to understand (despite being a very accepting person myself).. I think because of this I have always been bad at keeping up communications with friends and have always felt like an outcast though none of my friends make me feel that way. I have suffered the past year with pretty serious (undiagnosed) anxiety, which left me feeling super lonely, despondent and with thoughts of dying and self-harm. I am super paranoid that people hate me constantly and find it easier to not see people and not to respond to people than feel this crippling anxiety that they all know I'm a fake. every time I receive a message from someone I feel such deep anxiety, as if ive just been 'caught out' (whether that's for not keeping up with school work, doing bad things like smoking when I know I shouldn't be or just being a bum), even when the message has nothing to do with anything negative. I often message people because I miss them or I want to know that they are okay, but find when they reply I often ignore them, and I dont really know why - maybe my view of receiving messages has made me think others wouldn't care if I replied either even though I know this isn't true. and although I choose not to reply to messages, I feel awful about it. I hate that people are nice to me and I wish they would just all go away so that I owe them no responsibility I can't live up to. I feel like im super selfish, even though I am told im not. I also feel like anything nice I do is motivated by personal satisfaction, because I like seeing others happy, so anything I do to make others happy is not selfless, but selfish. people tell me how nice I am all the time and it just makes me feel worse. I have just broke up with my boyfriend of 1.5 years, I am 21 and he is 27. he was the most genuine and best person I have ever met, and because of this I always felt like I could never connect on a deep level as I felt like such a fake around him as he was genuine and I am not. I broke up with him even though I know he was really good for me, but he made me realise all the things I hate about myself more and when I tell him this he just says how amazing he thinks I am, but that makes me hate myself more. I dont know why I feel this way, I never want to hurt anyone and I dont think I am an unkind person, I just dont think I am genuinely good and feel that people will never know the real 'evil' me so I dont deserve true friendships... I feel fucked up and like a real imposter/criminal - I know that sounds crazy but I can't shake it. I dont know if any of this makes sense or if anyone will read this even. but I just needed to vent, I hope you guys are staying well in this time and I hope for better days to come for us all. thank you x",5.259545150501673,4.802133092753625,6.017246376811595,83.43382943143814,68.07246376811594,8.642140468227426,28.996655518394647,7.882392219407189,1.6715451505016716,2614,78,556,27,39,860,251,690,0.17600000000000002,0.625,0.2,0.9631,1,2,0,0,0,0,65.0,1,2,14,8,44,62,10,1,18,2,62,3,0,10,13,166,143,63,1,19,37,0,20,10,2,8,1,2,0,5,35,33,0,4,51,1,1,6,26,26,1,1,23,25,107,36,59,108,13,50,0,6,3,2,51,19,1,18,30,391,142,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0339218827104066,0.10588621955347237,0.0,0.0,0.05769176915275966,0.0,0.09734960290983873,0.0,0.0,0.08897954169056811,0.0,0.1047198890222276,0.037761261862950465,0.0,0.0,0.03985336982011805,0.0,0.0708349829715877,0.1034311576385832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04451536722981113,0.0375155210438668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04324826287782612,0.0,0.0,0.036539591731448634,0.0,0.04583909066092981,0.0,0.03386754449362071,0.0,0.0,0.027356281035920332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04402347703395156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.347997352788744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19611811440892973,0.038369762209093584,0.03573922987939264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002713922744393,0.09091088183553624,0.20364100148969316,0.0,0.11630861669740901,0.03608096678775078,0.0,0.046509453929523915,0.06554451488178649,0.0392150157857073,0.0,0.0,0.024107285712317537,0.07115688047718195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04200076559780374,0.0,0.09031009437074644,0.037998446542691265,0.2931548831638659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842618451021826,0.0,0.0,0.04540964541279114,0.0,0.18327608305861726,0.0,0.0,0.07540663146481079,0.0,0.0,0.3030557013129578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04608758468167032,0.0,0.029961285197359695,0.20723428684498407,0.0,0.03745611784858408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03828415327816724,0.08027440319762168,0.14157265441222194,0.0,0.042614863060970565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03145261669459648,0.09814677623040684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0407014831110565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03226101292412769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04049304741509732,0.2352599518086547,0.14815202168902694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040624986169204784,0.04315463979591656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042429758388237454,0.1448438654991751,0.10869694386153317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03373271832348094,0.0,0.04292956335605997,0.06760375353636594,0.0,0.044251516496574515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03594087048260128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04521224190810913,0.03387529272229475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415089171286295,0.03905305259540722,0.0,0.0,0.056361639993880164,0.13589960332044862,0.16670297656221258,0.06735075135068892,0.07420331950968982,0.0,0.0,0.08106496752313089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04415892481575652,0.051023967292503684,0.0,0.0,0.03499952290610889,0.0500388004189909,0.10100896733659964,0.0,0.0,0.038139127410632516,0.0,0.15310359766666362,0.0,0.04877892790339981,0.0,0.04600081456600636,0.03088101260204045,0.0,0.043227850602992016,0.09039818593634898,0.0,0.0,0.054631962390602584
mentalhealth,bagmannnn,2020/04/01,"Coping with a traumatic experience 19m   I should just say it here so I don't dance around the topic. At a young age I was raped multiple times.
This had and still has a major effect on my mental health. During the time my performance in primary school dropped behind other students, I couldn't sleep and had regular thoughts of suicide. I became socially inept, struggling to relate to and befriend other kids. I became emotionally numb and reserved. It was the lowest time of my life.
Today I still think back to the moments that scarred me so deeply. To this day I struggle with my sleeping schedule and feeling of self worth. In effect at times I feel lesser than others because of what happened.
With that said I still have methods and rules which push me through bad times. The first and most obvious way of helping yourself in a situation like this is to try your best to be open and talk about it. I first talked to a close friend about it when I was 17, years after the incident. It was the hardest conversation I'd ever had. I couldn't stop crying and when first explaining what I'd been through I could barely speak because of how scared I was. It didn't feel good to talk about it in the moment, but I felt proud after the fact. I felt stronger and more confident. In the last 2 years I've been able to talk to 4 other close friends about it, each time it became easier, and each time I felt secure when my friends assured me it was ok. So that's the most basic and obvious thing you can do to feel better in the long term. 
Coping with suicidal thoughts is kind of a personal mind game I play with myself. The main thing I tell myself when I want to kill myself is that I'm currently better than I ever was. I think back to when I was younger and remind myself of the fact that back then was the worst moment of my life and nothing will ever make me feel as terrible. In essence I didn't kill myself then so I would be stupid to give up now, as if I'm weaker than what I was.
Having a goal set in mind will help steer you away from stagnating in your life. I keep myself busy and in work always targeting myself towards points of improvement. Realistically I don't mind if I live a second rate life since I don't mind as long as I'm alive and still moving forward but it makes things easier if you always strive for better. My current goals are fairly basic. I'm going to learn to drive (I already ride a motorbike but driving is pretty essential to my future). Then I'm going to join the police and help people since I have a strong mind when geared towards justice. Other than that I haven't got much set. Set your basic goals asap to keep you going.
Being emotionally numb is one the issues I still struggle with today. I benefit in the sense that I've grown to be very empathetic towards other people, but my general feelings of happiness, excitement or even as basic as agitation are stunted and stagnant. It makes me feel just that little less human and it hurts on a deep level. To help with this I often feel bored and depressed as a result, even in tense or upbeat environments. If anyone knows any methods which help this I'd love to know.
I haven't got much to say about sleep since I still haven't solved it proper but i hope you see something here you could relate to and maybe try apply to yourself. For anyone who's struggled with this before, keep going. We'll be ok someday.",4.632561095128197,5.73095735364042,5.266087698776519,82.81131643008443,69.81723625557207,7.8078973159242535,26.35481015459517,8.058908269544373,1.5550458031677787,2701,81,521,35,47,871,291,673,0.11599999999999999,0.705,0.179,0.9934,3,0,3,0,0,3,52.0,1,9,0,16,38,39,4,5,30,2,50,12,3,7,8,103,92,53,4,12,13,0,11,1,3,5,7,4,0,4,43,35,0,5,21,3,1,12,10,17,0,5,25,16,71,22,90,53,13,99,0,2,1,2,38,30,0,10,55,365,114,7,0.058175255564016926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06419784113426323,0.0,0.09681294590363823,0.0,0.0,0.039561168698048106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135498266485236,0.0,0.0,0.05178831132239231,0.0,0.0,0.054657567614702654,0.13419954175352475,0.04857390841390585,0.07092619165724898,0.0,0.04950285767494315,0.0,0.061051341586389175,0.15435385795312476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09289641560847774,0.0,0.06390278653752078,0.03751822711997694,0.0,0.050106262372250736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13087866466837747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684841527226158,0.15786854776166956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05690656289794317,0.0,0.0,0.2353212574721307,0.0,0.1675721053193845,0.0,0.0,0.14845152799172912,0.0,0.0,0.1348381744163956,0.0,0.0,0.055807006123729866,0.13224935354528555,0.04879464426079199,0.09305613257055803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05144418636852824,0.06192864131237761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061837576266956615,0.0,0.0,0.19496823761401624,0.0,0.0,0.057781155229780085,0.0,0.0,0.062277814290534486,0.0,0.0,0.06071985240293248,0.0,0.15512652041048858,0.12872460180077902,0.06058057642040375,0.06394319808722902,0.04742059783260173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436361380626927,0.028421491322915826,0.05830688926315275,0.05136981648311693,0.10296654101124693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05250543946014722,0.0,0.11649730448173225,0.0,0.05844486349986135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05862697464239245,0.0,0.29370212109239696,0.0,0.0,0.06183109000020728,0.08553101314049771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05582072670899325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03942105875762561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806627945205911,0.05079638923428747,0.0,0.0,0.05499442041235904,0.0,0.0,0.05918514929050636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055337990040857016,0.09252659641657963,0.05824357957496919,0.0588764644594503,0.0463581467087928,0.0,0.06068947910506925,0.0,0.0,0.14436951770717424,0.06539142470161373,0.17465180711352854,0.05930234686483071,0.0,0.04478615391901476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787530054487903,0.04863711856702562,0.0,0.2432696332707596,0.0,0.12726857472195405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18703626713136765,0.05084773754113494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594716442093488,0.07455270950311511,0.0,0.092369309357449,0.2374572154667355,0.0,0.11028668004119853,0.0,0.0,0.0789943596077991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048000678445949164,0.03431327300055533,0.04617681003146125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04235227891455408,0.0,0.0,0.041326032423053806,0.0,0.0,0.07492591446510229
mentalhealth,JustAnOrdinaryJoy,2020/04/01,"Earthquake feeling? I'm going to say trigger warning for PTSD to do with speak of natural disasters. I won't be going into to depth but I use it as an analogy. 

So for a while I have  Thisthing that happens I focus on my surroundings too much. It feels like a mini earthquake that happens for a long amount of time

For the longest time I dismissed it as the dryer or washer being on in my old house but lately I've been checking any Appliance or possible source of shaking my whole house and there is nothing there.

So I was wondering if anyone experiences the same thing and if they could possibly help me. I'd like to be able to know that I'm not alone and what it could possibly be.",3.409683794466403,5.019332695652178,4.779538866930171,83.14049407114628,73.4927536231884,7.9167325428195,29.21212121212121,8.575989854853784,2.2747014492753634,544,23,106,10,11,181,89,138,0.044000000000000004,0.8440000000000001,0.111,0.8446,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,1,7,0,12,0,0,2,0,21,23,14,0,4,7,0,2,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,9,5,0,0,4,0,1,3,2,1,0,0,2,4,11,2,19,14,4,15,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,5,8,77,20,0,0.15332054313441246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15879384363076132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426322691685026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107205288639772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448279557733749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997691109107705,0.0,0.0,0.15504694675125869,0.1095322266501173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742711958731793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711616998897828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276752820465343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3538226431338969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426096082807083,0.0,0.1729522508284122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14980934571140053,0.0,0.0,0.13568385595783078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270824049158848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471151962153838,0.0,0.16088411872815464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5185376266473846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792235101956465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192664973648315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018593561332423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17880488334564562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1324197221844782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17117691101731766,0.0,0.0,0.16626958881277598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CheeseQuake454,2020/04/01,"My mother and her partner (not my father) used to constantly argue in a very loud and aggressive fashion and it has affected my mental health in a way I quite can't explain. I'll try to. #WHAT HAPPENED?

So my mother and father divorced when I was around 14-15 and not long after that my mother got in to a relationship with a man. 

The first year or two they used to constantly argue about something, I didn't quite catch what it was that they would argue about because all I could ever hear was the muffled sounds of screaming and name calling and sound of furniture being hit and doors being slammed. 

They never let me bring it up. The arguing would mostly happen during the night time and I would try to discuss it with them at the breakfast table but they always silenced me by saying that it's ""adult business""  and that I shouldn't worry about it because it's not about me. I've always been shy and careful, not the one who would talk about things like this out loud so I was scared to even try to bring it up with them. 

So now I'm 19 years old and I've discussed the matter with them many times. They've been kind to each other for many months now and they don't argue during the day or night. I'm happy for that, BUT....

All the arguing and shouting and slamming doors and that very negative energy has affected the state of my mental health pretty badly. I could never tell my mother that her actions have lead to me being depressed, sad and paranoid. I hear that screaming and arguing even when there's no one else in the house but me and my dog. It's driving me insane. I don't know how I can fix this. If I even can at this point.

What can I do?",4.545606512890097,5.178793749253732,5.072218453188603,85.81872116689281,69.71641791044776,7.523744911804613,25.973541383989144,7.348242739294969,1.1712089552238814,1306,36,265,12,22,418,157,335,0.172,0.755,0.073,-0.9859,0,0,1,0,1,0,31.0,0,0,8,4,19,18,8,1,15,0,28,3,0,6,5,59,43,31,0,8,10,6,0,1,1,5,2,10,2,3,26,26,1,0,2,0,0,6,13,14,0,4,8,10,37,4,35,23,4,40,0,2,0,0,39,11,0,4,22,195,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113678154233075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154648521952886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586436736634198,0.1253766224545797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500779098345894,0.0,0.10484889177392166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222599261061648,0.0,0.16421350921267824,0.0,0.0,0.0663211782118258,0.0,0.08857311795922049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590688550013352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20376805498843573,0.0930217025506246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747286318792137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822479208862876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18187634725910992,0.10947160279616533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186212532203851,0.23180891924914626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186597700503306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708862100825192,0.05651637299139791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10515751563272048,0.0,0.05024082787934569,0.0,0.0,0.0910072628755169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085205904659861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20727045661536533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208329037041333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862803935827496,0.0,0.0,0.19301059446827795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790984072666326,0.0,0.13936964850725875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972139420437086,0.0,0.0,0.10462191672961972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21875902451084064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040815384512173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177988888779658,0.10295749872011978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916873273320768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265626174730158,0.08988382772858028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832014858738894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992983916318425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094581515482248,0.0,0.10045653462109892,0.0,0.0,0.17763581940789044,0.0,0.16970213114399932,0.0,0.08162700325782475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443568299100643,0.0,0.2922090270792867,0.0,0.0,0.13244695465042858
mentalhealth,kalalatuganged,2020/04/01,"Do you sometimes feel like there's a devil whispering in your ear to kill yourself and that you're a puppet and you can't do anything about it? Because that's what I'm feeling right now. My anxiety is heightened as I am extremely scared that I might be in distress too much that I might make a mistake of attempting suicide. I might have a psychotic attack and attempt. And j just recently woken up from a nightmare about a creepy, sketchy person wearing all black that looks like a serial killer or something that can hear everything we say even if we aren't near to him.",7.290029761904763,6.816049848214287,7.0721428571428575,77.6061904761905,63.91071428571429,10.323809523809524,37.41666666666667,9.725611199111238,3.5491916666666663,461,21,86,8,6,146,82,112,0.264,0.682,0.054000000000000006,-0.9802,0,0,1,0,0,1,6.0,2,3,0,2,7,8,2,2,7,0,12,2,2,1,1,17,19,7,2,2,3,0,2,2,0,3,0,4,0,1,8,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,8,11,2,11,14,2,7,1,0,2,0,9,5,0,5,4,62,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14497900396542118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595528643165732,0.0,0.0,0.2156014862568057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552702141466625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517334301191607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.170324505441375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19164968057699525,0.13539006533330278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135979854450812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20967106059631613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851756119976964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914547063538914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265032120024211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.603138677070636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13931585717235506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654778131953311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18712390614267646,0.0,0.0,0.16184538591496986,0.0,0.15071050391793986,0.18973829293812305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589845702941384,0.18743588896721924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20729943359103964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lologhost3,2020/04/01,"My hurt hearts and I can’t breathe It’s like no matter how good things become, no matter how much I do, no matter how much I improve, that hole in my heart is never filled, and it hurts , physically.

For about three years I was in a deep hole, I started losing hope in this life as each day passed on, my self hatred grew and grew until I reached my lowest last year, and suicide started going into my mind, but I never dared to try it or do it, but I would often find myself looking at the streets wondering what would happen. If I just jumped.

Anyways, after hitting my lowest point an incident occurred between me and my friend and I just decided that I don’t want to feel like this no more, I don’t want to feel pain anymore , I want to live not just breathe.

And so thankfully day by day o started getting better , day by day I started to regain the hope I lost in the world, and started to give a little bit of support to People who are hurting as well, and I’m proud of that achievement , and I know that healing takes a lot of time, but for now I’m proud to say I don’t hate myself, I’m still on the way to love myself sure but I don’t hate it anymore.

But you see, some times I would have those days where I feel nothing , where I just wnat to curl inside my bed and cry, but tears don’t fall out, I know everybody has bad days and that they shouldn’t affect us. But this... whatever this is it just comes so suddenly and unexpectedly and it messes me up. I don’t hate myself or lower my self esteem, no I’m proud to be a weird potato and hapoy , but .... it’s just that even after all of these improvements, it still feels like I can’t breathe, I can’t take the air fully, sowmthing is blocking my airways and it hurts, it starts to hurt physically, it’s like there is a big hole in my heart and I don’t know how to close it up.

When I used to be hurt at least I knew that it was self hatred, I knew what was the root of the problem, but now? I don’t know what’s wrong, I feel so ... lost. So out of it. Like I’m here but not here. I feel so disconnected to this world in a way. I don’t know how to describe it exactky, but it’s not a nice feeling, it’s like the pea under the princesses bed, one small thing but she just cant sleep. I try to cry, I wnat to cry but the tears just won’t fall out, no matter how bad. And I can’t tell people because I don’t know what’s wrong, and it’s so hard to explain something I don’t know with the addition of being bad at expressing yourself.

It feels like I’m lost, no I am lost. I don’t know what to do.... it’s like I’m homesick for a place that doesn’t even exist, and the problem is I am home, my family and friends are here, and for a while that hole disappears for a while, I can’t feel the pain. And if for a fraction of second I can feel inhale all the air in. I can breathe without pain . But as soon as it comes it goes.

I wish I can find a place where my heart can beat, where that void inside is filled, where I can cry without wondering why tears aren’t coming out, a place where I can feel warm, look up at the stars and not feel so alone. 

I can’t see stars, and I have never star gazed, but I love them, because I know they won’t leave me even if I can’t see them , they just make me calm down and believe that I can reach out to my dreams and that it’s okay, but still it hurts, after the stars are gone it just hurts.

It hurts so much I can’t breathe.

I don’t want to just be alive, I wanna live, and breathe again.",2.268976673077873,2.9761454673768317,3.5665120579967464,94.26305604872515,75.01864181091878,6.521684667357103,22.429378113133104,6.42735559955562,0.18481918429748004,2670,64,651,18,54,874,254,751,0.221,0.64,0.139,-0.9974,4,1,1,0,0,1,95.0,1,1,5,11,50,57,3,0,30,1,61,18,11,10,6,147,136,71,1,17,38,0,14,8,2,6,5,1,4,3,54,41,0,1,29,1,0,14,43,30,1,3,10,21,87,27,76,115,11,96,0,15,5,2,21,44,0,12,44,435,141,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04876263075164841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338515162154938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793421494384496,0.05740135671725976,0.05199823979583447,0.0,0.053045158411775484,0.0,0.041640098690523784,0.05140122120404637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216706176648754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20686894697480845,0.21254743298556916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932914173550235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044384608308062345,0.0,0.2856721711900489,0.13454122405311855,0.0,0.0,0.08606397464443914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07275069071035305,0.0,0.02459834018882655,0.04516523150306657,0.026757718626586068,0.03949004896020313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041634352892360255,0.0,0.04217611857967066,0.13945083368422442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231690281388612,0.0,0.0,0.047226966615547435,0.09352586471604198,0.0,0.0,0.453619157481886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328747401740039,0.038378017884972485,0.0,0.04985291510664352,0.0,0.0,0.03325532573715776,0.1840146353546904,0.0471884147656182,0.08314832903188016,0.0,0.07907384625704933,0.05267258304354069,0.20558174430235746,0.040027332537409886,0.08498647367429504,0.0,0.03142752192998314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047539279432656366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383180206668884,0.0,0.10893735005338624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04517633572550781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03190390183154933,0.0,0.15029532637200993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528129783793704,0.0,0.14757163792770467,0.0,0.044507596838186336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010200533536693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03744140241173651,0.0,0.0,0.11255449307817908,0.0,0.14735001376908347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04711588411929569,0.0,0.0,0.036245933089468524,0.0,0.0,0.19994879107692926,0.0,0.11279895570241655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05149993737021315,0.05342796191496167,0.04437411673243597,0.0,0.07079943192415179,0.0,0.04115164021450714,0.043346671430672466,0.0,0.0,0.06255822087505364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05490764820485933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639310148839119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05663370718368998,0.04066362945488088,0.0,0.0,0.1110804557594086,0.07474281313425467,0.0,0.0,0.04233226635696243,0.0,0.0424840755194334,0.0,0.054141840907406924,0.09077050853780752,0.10211658561976122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033685469628516,0.10295329418030223,0.0,0.060638376925157576
mentalhealth,ilovemydogandket,2020/04/01,"Is anyone else hearing from CAMHS during this lockdown? I’ve just turned 18 so am paranoid about the discharge and then caring about me less, although my service goes to 18. They said they would make phone appointments, but they haven’t? Is anyone actually getting appointments now? Seems like a time they should be putting more effort in.",5.157499999999999,8.189785083333334,3.846666666666668,85.295,73.16666666666666,6.0,28.33333333333333,7.1686216300943375,1.689833333333333,275,11,45,3,6,79,52,60,0.027000000000000003,0.878,0.096,0.6429,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,4,1,5,2,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,1,0,7,14,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,6,2,5,10,2,5,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,1,4,30,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.2738900380269546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39249711484379823,0.2875760185709618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861582237732334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344608640939693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466366732264952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163315675770804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711948522880005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18734708229048566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821473743865385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669781336168224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555082597734554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365890555307838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052845796097022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19937744392142226,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bbaalrrc7567,2020/04/01,I’m hearing voices I’m a 28 year old male who has recently started hearing strange things. I have been diagnosed with Schizoaffective disorder and am struggling to cope witht the things I’m hearing. I am also battling addiction but am 2 weeks clean. I feel like there are people who are reading my mind. They tell me terrible things like they’re going to put me in jail or hurt my family. Every time I tel the story to somebody I am called a “Snitch” by the voices. They also mock me by calling themselves “Recovery Services” like as a taunt. I’m having a real hard time coping with this. I am really scared and have convinced myself that these are real people but no one believes me. It really does sound far fetched. I can’t think to myself anymore because the voices will repeat what I have said almost instantaneously. I really hope this is just my Mental illness and not something real. Anyone who can help me. Are there easy ways of dealing with this?,4.408315018315019,6.443135362637364,5.156285714285716,79.70538095238095,71.74725274725273,7.49069597069597,27.51794871794872,8.238735603445708,2.071220805860806,764,28,131,12,15,247,114,182,0.155,0.706,0.139,-0.0633,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,0,5,11,2,2,8,0,19,3,0,0,0,19,32,9,0,1,5,0,2,3,0,1,3,8,1,1,13,6,0,0,2,1,0,2,3,6,0,1,2,10,21,5,12,29,0,13,0,1,0,0,15,2,0,3,11,87,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12847108901278972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118007173874196,0.0,0.0,0.18848508760783747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11687297980691087,0.08240166018117676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183869692360717,0.0,0.0,0.13277369303929532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406707956680212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214955212964253,0.0,0.11961265647852648,0.0,0.0,0.1350633597441908,0.0,0.10312907644318348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929153892138466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109606485510687,0.0,0.0595871993836805,0.08419022451064212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697540785493264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556814588837192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3984678411677868,0.0,0.07899064537043493,0.0,0.0,0.11704908444844797,0.0,0.0,0.1261581066555162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17272289857016762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187624871566717,0.0,0.11899230549379622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366104926531812,0.0,0.0798564656109613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634011332958323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11846921256714638,0.0,0.0,0.11787931694800755,0.4024085118025368,0.22648823579476626,0.0,0.11636011571954788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209988868760626,0.0,0.11798583183634308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072470585507016,0.0,0.0,0.08341301451096249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319971682470153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300384445061007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348777795441066,0.07551187195711545,0.0,0.0,0.13743556333019147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354180122287976,0.09453009649828226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588987841041757
mentalhealth,but_what_if_not,2020/04/01,"Anyone else downplaying for the sake of othes? Just wondering is anyone else is downplaying how they actually feel about what's going on to spare making other people more upset? Outside it looks like I'm still doing good, live streaming fitness and reaching out to people. But when the camera is off I just cry. I cry about all the kids stuck at home with abusive parents.  I cry for the elderly. I cry for everyone dying alone. I cry for my family. I cry for my friends. I cry for myself. But if you call me,  I'll say I'm fine, just trying not to eat all my snacks.",2.171230893000807,4.370115584070799,3.8712308930008064,85.60464199517297,79.0,6.586967015285603,21.777152051488336,7.686295010490155,1.04472389380531,443,13,86,7,11,148,74,113,0.25,0.642,0.107,-0.9636,1,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,0,8,5,0,1,4,0,4,2,0,2,2,16,12,6,1,1,7,1,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,3,3,2,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,3,14,4,17,11,3,8,0,0,1,0,7,5,0,2,3,56,17,0,0.0,0.12660346719554585,0.10427322539843867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11066760076507436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14942836336499565,0.21896728497065235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091089761642898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8216118971189771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089666227484901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933741140683607,0.1785241311067848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10210272940051003,0.0,0.0,0.10073160608105212,0.0,0.054028144953813834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255445072192487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06072708704813098,0.08962332230964108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071823854905166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05220303408177787,0.0,0.09435325719451763,0.0,0.08972970401354095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713252832419305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11864773774860267,0.0,0.0,0.14815699020321016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849738849261425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533303477116952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254625030089888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587764395256955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i-mostly-lurk-tbh,2020/04/01,"Am I delusional or am I normal (Repost because I think it got buried) I had a dream a few nights ago that I got into a car accident and injured someone else in a car, when I woke up, I sincerely couldn’t remember if this happened (I woke up from this dream in the middle of the night so my brain was groggy) of course this never actually happened in reality I know that, last night I was watching a movie where that happened and again, (this was in the middle of the night 3 am - 3:30) I couldn’t remember if I’m reality I did. I don’t have these thoughts when I’m going about my day, just when I get groggy tired, in the middle of the night, not just with car accidents, also things like hitting deer, getting injured (myself) and breaking my arm or leg. Is this delusions?",3.2457692307692305,4.613445628205131,4.683846153846158,84.63615384615387,73.48717948717949,7.507692307692308,27.102564102564106,8.07648339933343,1.665779487179488,602,22,123,9,12,201,85,156,0.094,0.841,0.066,-0.6249,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,0,11,0,13,6,3,0,1,21,29,12,0,5,7,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,11,5,0,0,5,2,0,4,5,0,0,0,10,1,18,2,15,16,1,30,0,0,1,0,0,12,0,4,14,87,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.13863076016164572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592824769465866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11360589822048148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659889007214992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15858673432060913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916174053660125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186734941206751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14844171495542513,0.0,0.08073637511179244,0.0,0.22723785407681746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3768714492700989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807285084157913,0.1157984389943316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940368699489301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956597708416052,0.0,0.0,0.6665717629765425,0.13918933315954804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32185418201538496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036757832280608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09437882312351492,0.09102676661452104,0.0,0.11278033516506443,0.0,0.1632778878233936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,115673,2020/04/01,"Quarantine has increased my symptoms and I need to seek aid I’m a student stuck at home for who knows how long and I am DONE feeling this way. I have suspicions that I may have ADHD with some depression tossed in but who knows unless I get checked out. 


Are there any online resources for counselors/psychiatrist so that I don’t have to leave the house?",4.787826086956521,6.17110082608696,4.670260869565219,86.1584347826087,69.72463768115942,7.838840579710146,29.74202898550725,8.238735603445708,1.9678672463768119,283,11,56,4,5,87,55,69,0.11,0.845,0.045,-0.4767,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,9,1,0,1,0,13,16,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,5,4,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,2,1,7,0,9,13,2,6,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,2,1,39,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3478792745397108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19684533179780933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24931477421950934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2962219996814848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14636161079988752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123290496413633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903558247868204,0.0,0.0,0.3340023978003973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31816350370646823,0.0,0.0,0.30650040265451906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25616638229435906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146337635361284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30086375501699913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22976291629260875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,18joker,2020/04/01,"Seeing things more positive Hey guys, i am looking for advices seeing things more positive. I would not say i am a negative person every day, but i have the feeling that negativity often beats positivity in my head. Now, i am looking for kind of a selfhack how i could deal with those situations more easily without falling into negativity. Happy for any advices i can get!
Have a nice day!",6.114583333333332,7.542213513888887,8.053777777777778,62.969,66.6388888888889,10.204444444444446,35.23333333333333,10.355215969177356,4.159346666666666,311,15,49,8,5,110,50,72,0.10099999999999999,0.58,0.319,0.9526,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,8,1,1,1,0,10,14,2,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,6,8,3,8,12,3,6,0,0,4,0,5,2,0,1,3,43,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3960241226507677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779838993328253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16178713777549333,0.0,0.0,0.2613649424638517,0.20890724349939802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072828263579753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245807778150563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058681484526982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20063998592304247,0.0,0.21570816395073888,0.0,0.0,0.2079614288334509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21101262087774697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34032384421082695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17693260541250114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611430656855237,0.0,0.0,0.3229468788204796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277696371434657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692426791278069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195332400463601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439457153981503,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,somerandomusernam,2020/04/01,"Forced to being a ""nice guy"". I was a violent young man from age 14 to 22. I wouldn't take shit from nobody ever.
At some point (in jail) I understood that it wasn't the way to go. So, I changed, and life should be good now, except that it's not. 
It's like somehow people know, that I'm not going to confront them, or anyone, because I've got so much to lose. I mean, I've spent years getting to where I am now, (now 28 years old) without hitting anyone, or getting into confrontations that might lead to me smashing some mouthy dudes face in. 
It's not like I've ""made it"" but I'm doing alright for a guy with a criminal record.
I was always hooking up with girls before, but I've actually been single and haven't had sex for 4 years now.
My selv confidence is completely shattered and it just seems like its getting worse. I still have some of the same friends and when I'm with them I act like I'm confident, and it works to some extent. But sometimes I'll hook up with a girl and she's down to come back home, but because I haven't had sex for so long I back out. Its been like that for 4 years now and is only getting worse. 
I really just want to erupt and say what I really feel about some of the pricks at work but it'll ruin everything. What do I do? Should I just say fuck it or just walk it off pop a viagra and stop feeling sorry for myself?",2.638544788544788,3.5724511328671333,3.9556943056943052,90.95921911421914,74.38461538461539,7.125940725940727,23.059607059607053,7.447530270364453,0.694377489177489,1048,27,240,12,21,345,149,286,0.18100000000000002,0.731,0.08800000000000001,-0.981,0,1,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,2,4,20,17,6,0,9,1,23,8,3,2,1,55,47,21,0,4,17,0,2,5,1,5,2,2,1,5,19,16,0,1,6,0,1,6,8,8,0,0,11,4,21,9,36,28,9,38,0,2,0,3,11,12,3,11,24,154,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.1185366998802818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107234624863333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16986858317766584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868050796157066,0.0,0.14809334711111186,0.0,0.10336158918660984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284986139505565,0.10463520983671472,0.12735844902307705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987610780220897,0.0,0.0,0.10916894505277974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283724760612393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384702651724866,0.11229658600580338,0.25385117985169503,0.0,0.13806782066100418,0.10188284498055583,0.09715024745855512,0.0,0.0,0.24054778465663115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12184380230682185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667564549037701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579749293983414,0.2967192853269349,0.0,0.0,0.10749667606924616,0.0,0.13589328841700446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11493736827758452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231588441572814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885993303528434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08929405147672423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746179619911113,0.0,0.0,0.09238302063336266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421164980644559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482793028926877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15563293116617166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19319482746723535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110581261457631,0.0,0.0,0.12468668573730768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201364313993225,0.13597514900048427,0.0,0.0,0.09700569147921677,0.1015539325336759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09132993928051424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164585226211316,0.0964168270801854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709225353814418,0.0,0.17686247056798354,0.0,0.2475755751119281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31288947564305897
mentalhealth,ThrowAwayThoughts911,2020/04/01,"What is wrong with me? I enjoy pretending to be other people online. I have had a fake personality online for the last 7 years, with this I am able to follow and speak to people who do not truly like the real ME and everyone enjoys this fake person i've created that I basically live thru her and I can't stop.

Is this a mental health condition? it's addicting. Whatever it is, please tell me what it can be so I can stop. I want to be myself and liked for who I am",2.1412244897959205,3.5633559285714287,4.840561224489797,82.17676020408162,76.44897959183673,8.16530612244898,20.413265306122447,8.841846274778883,1.2422816326530612,363,8,77,8,8,130,62,98,0.132,0.67,0.198,0.5972,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,4,0,14,2,0,0,0,11,16,5,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,2,12,6,0,2,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,1,13,4,9,12,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,6,58,25,0,0.22013245861852,0.0,0.0,0.2399768726654567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21034599777926324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339905096536456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17943733446196306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21509119992205808,0.0,0.19438099397375289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22184174258063813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052242590893079,0.3844223439218846,0.0,0.24163933502647225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505589310362779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36808118456817457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924054715634562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12983982752854056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406802865270619,0.0,0.1417580860241694
mentalhealth,uglyegg,2020/04/01,"Constant loops and circles Hey cant get myself to do anything, I start off not knowing what I want to do and realizing that there isn't anything that appeals to me and none of the things I think I like bring me any joy and then I start to feel bad because I know I should be doing something and that I am capable of doing something but there is nothing that I feel like is worth doing anymore and by the time I finally work up the courage to just try something for the love of god to stop sulking it just makes me feel worse and I usually am on the verge of sobbing at this point. God it sounds lame and I dont know what kind of repressions I might have but I literally can't enjoy anything anymore.",6.9875566502463045,5.317031834482762,7.136847290640392,80.7893103448276,65.13793103448276,9.94088669950739,36.57635467980296,8.418075326091056,2.785325123152709,556,23,118,6,7,180,81,145,0.171,0.664,0.16399999999999998,-0.2829,0,0,3,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,4,11,0,1,5,0,17,1,0,1,0,27,31,11,0,2,5,0,3,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,2,8,0,1,1,6,4,0,0,0,4,18,7,17,28,1,15,0,2,0,1,2,6,1,1,10,84,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10730551069559699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3129790191330423,0.0,0.0,0.3895537036405428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175161958985526,0.09618991890209752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17051954223031676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849337025273822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393565635975156,0.112728253919189,0.0,0.17285590357881947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244099036000578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16431844419565386,0.26015880288939874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15418061404674493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424154841979132,0.0,0.1053288966889521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673947783635945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15140785229642126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491665833433204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3644332012826964,0.0,0.0,0.22337518481776186,0.0,0.0,0.13192307048437846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483149766426247,0.10110819308741706,0.0,0.0,0.092011104440363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071319475479088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737880890813697,0.0,0.09307114537148886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11487610370501555,0.0,0.16080583602644274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unravelmysweater,2020/04/01,"Why is my imagination and creativity completely gone after experiencing trauma? So I'm a 22 year old female, from being a toddler up until the age of 15 I was an artist. Not a great or even very good artist, but I spent 75% of my time drawing, doodling, coloring. I loved to draw people and animals, I was never very good at drawing things you'd see outside like buildings, trees, roads, etc. I had a very good eye for detail, I studied painting for a couple years, I've tried every medium of art. 

My entire childhood was extremely traumatic, my home life and school life and family were absolutely awful and evil, so I think drawing was my way of escaping that. At the age of 15 I was in a very happy long term relationship, I think my creative output increased a little while dating this guy. 

After a few months towards the end of this relationship my boyfriend realized how racist and bigoted and evil my family was, he grew disinterested in someone who was related to people like that, and he broke up with me. 

My brain just kinda.....snapped. I don't know why. I was crying all day every day for months, I was hospitalized, I was suicidal, I was taken out of school, I even started to smoke cigarettes, drink, do drugs, and have sex with any guy that would look at me. Hell, even my taste in music changed from soft indie rock to pretty intense rap and hip hop.

Ever since then I can't draw. I feel no creativity, nothing makes that spark anymore, and when I did try to force myself to draw, it was like all my skill and years of practice was just gone. Everything I made myself draw looked like a small child drew it. My imagination is completely dead. So I stopped. 

Has anything like this ever happened to anyone else? Why is this happening to me? It's been years and I think it may be resolving itself kinda, I haven't tried to draw anything in years but I've found music gives me small sparks once in a while. 

TL;dr: Used to be a very proactive artist but a traumatic experience took away all skill and imagination I used to have.",4.818520408163267,6.115209933673472,5.643469387755103,79.5372448979592,69.56122448979592,8.661224489795918,28.030612244897966,9.04235418022936,2.2305193877551024,1602,55,304,30,28,524,205,392,0.157,0.696,0.14800000000000002,-0.9214,0,0,4,0,0,0,56.0,0,1,0,3,12,17,3,0,16,1,33,10,3,5,6,50,57,27,2,1,7,0,2,5,0,2,3,0,1,3,15,17,2,1,11,7,1,5,6,5,0,0,24,9,42,12,42,27,7,53,1,1,5,2,11,17,1,3,35,188,57,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056856192271893424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291650248688964,0.05846053957573831,0.08566610341271715,0.13760424250869774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855230964318996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333399042390993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844599943978,0.0,0.17532244068065356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251047501092503,0.09183927668613856,0.10784026888160264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190384477276462,0.09695854049851202,0.0,0.06984361467106398,0.0,0.07405172235175894,0.0,0.0932448325548299,0.16566655201185665,0.15125613997453224,0.14088640757690798,0.0,0.07514132764649725,0.08178450202907399,0.15763604475664136,0.0,0.042274631604725964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916716715022524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08020425014506888,0.0,0.21037884627006304,0.0,0.09217792909393888,0.0,0.16556979544672026,0.14786825807724288,0.08900209102688582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838654716907408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04594867751096842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810936755179273,0.20423281572434693,0.08379701145900105,0.0,0.07399029965457134,0.14041904212762638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07545933195380243,0.07911175146372075,0.055808876572255896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346994644696542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448351370478045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022396898198625,0.0,0.08773235452607861,0.08903961159677122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592628593596715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505922191999785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795270427698196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1692311776300464,0.06662461674884268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916126197391304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07084064408450366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591780532725684,0.0,0.0,0.06989989062012021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09145339726677827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055545327995856784,0.16071756695002026,0.0,0.0,0.048752398747263975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092891376828901,0.17029268773135536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14442064393644122,0.0,0.3449260844307245,0.0,0.0663640048070924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22632918995962295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059392604480756325,0.0,0.0,0.26920351061225595
mentalhealth,Ho1s,2020/04/01,Anyone else feel like they don’t deserve anything anymore? I don’t know I just feel like sometimes I wake up and thing I’m just a waste of oxygen or something. I mean i want to just be back to a time where I can’t enjoy life and feel like I have a purpose. But with all sorts of problems it makes me feel like the world hates me and the reason I have so many problems is because the world wants me to kill myself or something.,2.4607692307692304,3.633470461538465,3.2250549450549464,95.09494505494509,75.15384615384616,5.2,23.98901098901099,3.1291,-0.007114285714286074,336,10,76,0,7,106,56,91,0.166,0.682,0.152,-0.5106,0,0,2,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,1,0,6,9,2,0,6,0,7,2,1,2,1,24,18,7,1,4,6,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,4,13,5,7,17,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,3,6,48,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634009648400029,0.11520636164378993,0.16881951760971506,0.13558619404836889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266928419400253,0.0,0.10043820573035347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13763863263491766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33323719092276555,0.4708278658715923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626696919590866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18228622933405567,0.0,0.09054962538490477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637722308449368,0.3219801910638998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099808120824336,0.16704417102817304,0.0,0.1794755845496509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153125384532898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694041597816762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25368574491787416,0.16295516102478966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109461445124419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607483136215324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943633793037202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mulderscouch,2020/04/01,Online counseling? Anyone have any recommendations or experience with seeking or going through online therapy? I’ve heard of better help and some other but before I seek one I wanted to ask people’s feelings!,5.573333333333334,9.004341888888893,6.9311111111111146,61.40000000000003,74.55555555555556,8.044444444444443,28.44444444444445,8.841846274778883,3.3942444444444444,172,7,21,4,4,58,32,36,0.0,0.871,0.129,0.5349,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,8,6,4,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,2,1,4,5,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,14,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417635911482553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485855880166299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323601837080083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3025185816663124,0.0,0.0,0.3144256875654965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3477636141419049,0.0,0.0,0.17975995828831676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020483702350848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23829539337009806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409073605699665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464705608698825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4065644039653762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20969299890966125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,paradiabolic,2020/04/01,"My friend's pet ideology is setting off old trauma Some time ago, I went through a series of abusive relationships, one of which I didn't manage to escape until my abuser abruptly died. As a result, I have a lot of discomfort and trauma around feelings I can best describe as ""don't forget, you're here forever."" Being trapped with someone I can't escape, that sort of a feeling. Over time, the severity of that discomfort waned, but it's recently gotten a lot stronger due to quarantining and the general stressful state of the world.

A dude in my social circle, J, is really, really into transhumanism, and particularly the idea that we should ""abolish death"" and ""promote immortality."" He brings it up whenever it seems even vaguely germane to the conversation. And... that's pretty upsetting for me right now! 

I don't have him followed on the primary social media my circle uses, but plenty of the people I do follow also have him followed, which means he's still a part of my online experience, and I can't cut him out without cutting off the vast majority of my close friends. 

Is it remotely reasonable for me to ask him to cool it with that kind of talk when it's on someone else's post? It doesn't seem reasonable, but neither does having to pull away from all my friends to avoid randomly running into him talking about how my late and unlamented husband should still be alive. (I know that's not how he means it, but right now, that's all I can hear.) 

Or, is there something else I can do that doesn't involve either placing this strict limitation on him, isolating myself from everyone through the only connection I have left, or randomly sending myself into panic attacks?",9.944285714285714,8.047278242038217,9.917652411282988,63.90566878980894,59.5732484076433,12.793084622383985,41.5368516833485,11.491704259439757,4.858974340309372,1344,60,225,30,14,446,175,314,0.14400000000000002,0.752,0.10400000000000001,-0.9092,2,2,1,0,1,0,43.0,1,0,0,3,13,17,3,6,16,1,25,0,0,6,2,53,41,20,2,2,9,1,2,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,19,16,0,2,10,0,0,8,10,11,0,1,3,4,31,6,44,34,10,46,0,0,0,0,24,21,0,10,14,170,50,2,0.0,0.2632588376506117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847902205301548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884263825646772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988981111820384,0.10385883633657757,0.12638661050224667,0.10437741762321942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658735753008928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529907930845483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721999070004284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856112486049319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337720543200463,0.0,0.0,0.10615604160909936,0.0,0.10867223589186666,0.0,0.0,0.1123459487803048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25749518423184936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252121488548406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541274220186613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568835571795395,0.06105491135247309,0.0,0.12532000868214124,0.0,0.12070505192601914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888980070684627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420300660114928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657552335548335,0.0,0.07528085300282063,0.08449276018887432,0.0,0.1303460558596123,0.0,0.12030506820668035,0.0,0.07701929081149685,0.0,0.116070638641396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063983087618371,0.1130235631438166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234061454541858,0.22844834341931286,0.1096929184112564,0.11927446311231132,0.0,0.18974906069855912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20227344682316295,0.0,0.1255057378044257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264947415289814,0.1882608805748112,0.08552636524727683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17744123478355794,0.0,0.12725895702418016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17858791945040153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295607858582691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595041784283836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298618600467001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709162387574524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VirtualLeaf57,2020/04/01,"Why am I so sensitive? I can't handle criticism and a single glance in my directions spawns thousands of 'what-ifs'. I can't manage online school and I can't manage my time. In January, I was right on the border of killing myself because of academic stress. I went to inpatient and then some therapy. I just don't have the motivation anymore. It used to be ""get good grades and you'll be considered valuable"" but I know that that's a path to figuratively drowning myself in work. Now, I just can't do it. I don't have a healthy motivation to do anything. These past few weeks have been fine and my mood was better but one little bump in the road and I crash. Why does this happen? Why am I so fragile?",0.8924113475177329,3.3993865035461006,2.9472695035460994,87.8841666666667,88.21985815602837,6.253900709219859,22.0177304964539,7.594959193182576,1.1865773049645392,551,20,112,11,18,185,85,141,0.11699999999999999,0.795,0.08800000000000001,-0.5988,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,1,0,4,5,7,1,1,6,0,19,0,0,3,0,16,24,11,2,0,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,4,0,0,1,6,2,0,2,4,2,18,4,12,17,3,14,0,0,1,0,1,8,0,1,5,79,24,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021833366102072,0.0,0.0,0.16776687419086206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242766930880072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18030562554841284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17840719738009972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651317491253633,0.0,0.0,0.17099570377164516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180280745690662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22555092071176136,0.0,0.1120411094698897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204330366894376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13814695829435594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19461609598873691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17410307222299215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063263833223517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335313313724533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23314204939895303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887769443762593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1760774199989999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16353147110378907,0.0,0.0,0.1889886707626555,0.5518803787648584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484191113397746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Suspicious_Citron,2020/04/01,"Having childish reactions to small disappointments When I was a child I used to get really upset over minor disappointments. For example, I would get really upset (sad) if I asked my mom to pick up something while grocery shopping and she forgot, or if we were going to go to a restaurant I really wanted to go to and it was closed.

Lately I've been having this type of emotional reaction to similar situations. I'm a grown man so naturally I hide this on the outside, but I really wish I could unchain myself from the un-earned sadness that comes along with these reactions.

A recent example: My wife was going to pick something up for me from the post office on her way home from work. She forgot and I had to wait until Monday to go and get it. Upon hearing that she forgot I was so sad I felt like I could cry. This is obviously not a reasonable reaction. 

What are some methods I can use to get over these silly feelings as quick as possible, or better yet, not have them in the first place?",3.7395618556701034,5.611805572164951,5.500605670103095,77.2219394329897,73.17525773195877,8.767525773195876,26.042525773195877,9.354420925462401,2.4421453608247425,787,27,143,19,16,269,116,194,0.124,0.805,0.071,-0.8602,0,0,3,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,1,3,5,10,0,2,9,0,16,0,0,5,1,34,39,16,0,7,7,2,2,1,0,1,0,1,1,2,10,9,0,4,3,1,1,7,2,7,0,1,11,3,23,3,31,25,1,29,0,5,0,0,12,11,0,5,10,108,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13388914651536812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12666435094896047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12336930267320895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286952398450467,0.0,0.1573178361968084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16110055167834966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241513446148991,0.0,0.13751137962406199,0.0,0.0,0.1218208387519811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29930119211254463,0.0,0.4069693839946085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16141667223384448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14365895523220465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155571923966475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996889742487514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16773475158962206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14963193591758978,0.0,0.0,0.16145635346285792,0.13716289584292118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669955117578607,0.14725157147023274,0.14141012688865062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609826112018481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22051184957262307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473880895629899,0.0,0.0,0.08447346592794075,0.1136794845770179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469320086600184,0.0,0.0,0.10426413679048704,0.0,0.0,0.10173769176054154,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,njerschow,2020/04/01,"It’s Time to Make Self Care a Priority Hey, I know we’re all going through it right now so I’ve put together an article on self care that can help us all during this time.

[https://lifeshack.io/its-time-to-make-self-care-a-priority-part-1/](https://lifeshack.io/its-time-to-make-self-care-a-priority-part-1/)

I’ve included a list of strategies that have helped me and others in the past to deal with emotional distress. I hope you find them useful as well.

If you have any other ideas on self care or questions please comment or message me directly. I would love to chat :)",9.210333333333336,12.797757533333336,7.021944444444442,64.75625000000002,62.55555555555557,7.6111111111111125,25.69444444444445,8.472884824447931,1.7321111111111116,478,13,73,7,8,139,69,90,0.032,0.669,0.299,0.9774,0,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,1,2,1,0,3,7,0,1,4,0,4,1,0,2,2,15,13,6,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,7,2,0,0,4,1,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,6,10,12,2,10,0,0,0,1,16,4,0,5,4,43,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372666998376863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5526872292860229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117722449889006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219535271009052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909035697175447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061615371621219786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533806138638944,0.0,0.0,0.10768165610630928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238858748098118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05958265665842776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978497687208621,0.0,0.2171057783221417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234808155951471,0.1034954409356042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900832789595532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898813149161594,0.1214508511702284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925867623457246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5655082173655583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25287321361008386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041122687280526,0.09363670630128508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747909975258932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701569125644503,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,holly8_6,2020/04/01,"I feel like I am literally going crazy. I don’t know where to even start.  I have always had anxiety and depression and have been medicated for years.  Things have been slowly getting worse minute by minute.  I am doing all the things to keep myself regulated not having more than 2 coffees a day,  going outside for an hour walk everyday, eating healthy meals,  and going to bed at a regular time and sleeping at least 8 hours.  

My skin all hurts, I feel uncomfortable in my body.  My chest feels so tight it is hard to breath at times.  My jaw is constantly clenched to the point it is painful.  I notice strange thoughts and memory’s are creeping into my head and I don’t know if they are real or not.  I flux between completely not giving any fucks and being in a full on panic about everything.  

How long will it be like this as I don’t know how much more of this I can take on.  I am sooooo tired of living and being sad.  I just don’t want to hurt anymore.  If this is what normally feels like I’m happy to check out.",2.92514705882353,4.647714553921574,4.0713725490196095,87.24617647058822,75.02941176470588,7.349019607843138,23.764705882352942,8.124751697461798,1.2294882352941174,795,24,166,13,17,259,129,204,0.17600000000000002,0.741,0.083,-0.9581,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,0,7,11,1,1,6,0,26,13,7,2,2,34,45,15,0,4,7,0,7,3,0,1,3,0,1,0,9,10,2,2,8,0,1,4,7,7,0,0,4,7,20,4,25,37,7,26,0,4,0,1,2,12,1,3,13,113,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032124030183613,0.0,0.0,0.0901622641026323,0.0,0.10142706936931578,0.0,0.13148857313445533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14727191120812938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139012722872593,0.14327715232485844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550627834260117,0.0,0.11419516181850195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13566743084774496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757106199934214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11915873992910805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681555937731005,0.1894373277906138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12257258399193005,0.06927012692579636,0.12718749699508264,0.2260531260987634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113906887182692,0.11877000906664002,0.0,0.13607033637127866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611387968252789,0.0,0.2838697098488347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11784753217079864,0.0,0.0,0.2185955459573718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19432282395948336,0.0,0.11707487703423332,0.11733344552139847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13356531673862074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09746514131823096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129905030773514,0.0,0.1509487632627312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107965895563632,0.15555978824553585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253355656713688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509106185806528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13268062999824784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384425961424428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09968732845413644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17616700423695103,0.0,0.0,0.10525758388016182,0.15462261807710295,0.15238681413912153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07820199666281431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511531852441594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853803149711689
mentalhealth,looby2pointwhoa,2020/04/01,"How am I supposed to set goals for therapy? I just started going recently (about time) and my therapist keeps asking me what my goals are. I don't know. To not be anxious? To not hate myself? To be comfortable enough around other people to have a relationship? 


These are all goals I have, but like I have no idea how to break those down into measurable weekly goals. Especially with this cornoa bullshit.

 When she asks me what my goals are it feels very overwhelming.",3.434367816091953,6.144705770114943,3.9133333333333375,84.22333333333336,77.50574712643677,7.544827586206896,23.459770114942533,8.515128840125781,1.7536804597701154,370,12,68,8,9,116,63,87,0.087,0.807,0.106,-0.4924,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,5,6,4,1,1,1,0,10,0,0,2,1,15,18,5,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,1,12,2,12,16,2,11,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,6,53,19,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646630321553814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20855360430346248,0.4380292888887957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24206775482438175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184560163333032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331433611388418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312971566502611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644669255981745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082335706556339,0.0,0.0,0.1287509101114079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445448410500265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16241615241840404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313173955276508,0.25152269225492196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582040289724936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679128329537022,0.27201026891914737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13660710272512494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933006549797613,0.0,0.0,0.18792053948848653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ResidentDetail,2020/04/01,"It’s Time to Make Self Care a Priority hey, I know we're all going through it right now so I've put together an article on self care that I think can help us during this time. This whole situation is quite distressing and the isolation sure as hell isn't helping. Let's do what we can to care for ourselves and one another. We're in this together.

[https://lifeshack.io/its-time-to-make-self-care-a-priority-part-1/](https://lifeshack.io/its-time-to-make-self-care-a-priority-part-1/)

if you have any other ideas on self care or questions, please feel free to reach out.",9.210333333333336,12.797757533333336,7.153055555555554,63.81625000000002,62.55555555555557,8.5,25.69444444444445,9.188382445141503,2.089444444444445,478,13,75,9,8,140,69,90,0.11599999999999999,0.65,0.23399999999999999,0.8839,0,1,0,0,0,0,41.0,2,1,0,1,2,8,1,1,3,0,7,0,0,1,2,14,16,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,8,4,0,0,5,0,1,2,1,2,0,1,0,1,5,7,10,15,2,10,1,0,0,0,10,5,1,3,3,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926984563093731,0.10681148554593052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6231323193616937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051504631041071836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057890683000254524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655228262379568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499011909343634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05598084695699773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416108602562704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20398159517132886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690245193611675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061385275130851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118141983621896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239972923896634,0.1141090695424032,0.10834307673519174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698983334753335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5313228839518029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449747425918007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600399649248767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526923810144787,0.0,0.0,0.23758686612084756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252778480309985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372560156042875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Odd-Egg,2020/04/01,"It’s Time to Make Self Care a Priority hey, I know we're all going through it right now so I've put together an article on self care that I think can help us during this time. This whole situation is quite distressing and the isolation sure as hell isn't helping. Let's do what we can to care for ourselves and one another. We're in this together.

[https://lifeshack.io/its-time-to-make-self-care-a-priority-part-1/](https://lifeshack.io/its-time-to-make-self-care-a-priority-part-1/)

if you have any other ideas on self care or questions, please feel free to reach out.",9.210333333333336,12.797757533333336,7.153055555555554,63.81625000000002,62.55555555555557,8.5,25.69444444444445,9.188382445141503,2.089444444444445,478,13,75,9,8,140,69,90,0.11599999999999999,0.65,0.23399999999999999,0.8839,0,1,0,0,0,0,41.0,2,1,0,1,2,8,1,1,3,0,7,0,0,1,2,14,16,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,8,4,0,0,5,0,1,2,1,2,0,1,0,1,5,7,10,15,2,10,1,0,0,0,10,5,1,3,3,42,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926984563093731,0.10681148554593052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6231323193616937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051504631041071836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057890683000254524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655228262379568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499011909343634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05598084695699773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416108602562704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20398159517132886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690245193611675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061385275130851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118141983621896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239972923896634,0.1141090695424032,0.10834307673519174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698983334753335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5313228839518029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449747425918007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600399649248767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526923810144787,0.0,0.0,0.23758686612084756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252778480309985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11372560156042875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rawrebound619,2020/04/01,"Mental Health Attack Every Couple Months I’ve had bad mental health attacks every couple months. I just had one last night where I felt truly alone. I have a loving family and a fiance but no real friends that i can speak my mind to. My attacks are usually about whats the point of living or how alone i really am in this world. 

I asked my fiance if he wanted to watch a show with me but he said it was too feminine and declined and so i asked one of my gaming buddies because he said he seem interested but also declined so im left with no one to watch. After that, it hit me how i’ll be alone forever. I need to find a friend who is like a ride or die.

I used to have a ton of real friends but we parted ways after middle school.

I pretty much cried myself to sleep. Idk how to deal with it because im usually a happy person and make others happy and have a positive outlook in life. 

Im at a point where i’ve come to a realization life is just about us waiting to die. No one to speak my mind to. No purpose in life but to make others happy.

Not gonna off myself but yeah..just sucks",0.8821287408243919,2.8381839134199183,3.1918915866741955,90.06684359119144,82.16017316017316,5.575832862789385,18.268586485977792,6.7026698264267655,0.04859856954639597,848,19,182,9,23,291,120,231,0.174,0.647,0.179,0.8126,0,3,0,0,1,0,16.0,2,0,0,0,13,14,4,0,11,0,12,7,1,6,0,38,29,20,2,3,12,0,1,1,3,1,5,4,0,1,10,10,0,1,3,2,0,2,5,5,0,4,6,7,21,9,27,20,3,23,0,0,2,1,20,12,1,4,9,118,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699212886648815,0.0,0.06947194721833283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242821549948538,0.29649020243757324,0.0,0.0,0.07253495096697507,0.10591340087963803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483301000176716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922456494879352,0.09542541746188113,0.0,0.08956178496550854,0.0,0.0,0.18031998394546128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463877410933521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189570911664565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341127187872895,0.0,0.07939993729338662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013525509709594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774323360661701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468291759516695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2815117857106351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081272335144645,0.0,0.0,0.09438728026269587,0.0,0.18408195455370466,0.04244154005375078,0.0,0.07671005363691667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840586852284173,0.0,0.11597620401968856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750941964476802,0.0,0.1754330227726516,0.0,0.1386816819327032,0.0,0.06386132027339199,0.06441489540953811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152400370069651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354683538895149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940745064821843,0.0,0.0,0.07585376023300633,0.0,0.0,0.16424527975293388,0.0,0.0,0.08838061506557647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19775996249506475,0.05565278032479232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652713782066341,0.0,0.0,0.08791965897173888,0.0,0.07908550723585711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693528877907257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044969818708588,0.07502999117058945,0.1913556821449818,0.0,0.051239681052702366,0.06895538697241176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Acetic1Acid,2020/04/01,"I was never accepted. My relationship ended. I'm hurt. I want to get out of this bs. I am 19 years old. I was not very good in studies, below average. My parents wanted me to score the highest, but I couldn't. I tried, but most of things didn't make sense to me. Most of my teachers used to made fun of me, when I scored low grades or when I couldn't perform. I found solace in arts. I used to draw, I still do. I love to draw. However, I am not the best artist out there. It makes me feel good. I don't think I will ever do good in life, I don't even think I can get a job. Right now, I am in college studying engineering. I met a girl here. She is the best girl I've met. Everything was fine, until now. She has decided that I'm not good for her and our relationship has to end. The only thing which was making me feel good is now over. This relationship was my hope because I wanted to do something in my life because of her. I cry, a lot. I am so heartbroken now. I don't now why am I living? 

I'm not even living, I am just existing because that's what I have to do.",-0.7009362581465552,1.261781630901293,2.057100619933241,95.68450961691308,88.91416309012877,5.3402638690192346,18.07168971546654,6.775458762138228,-0.0868040375139083,812,22,199,11,27,282,115,233,0.18100000000000002,0.745,0.07400000000000001,-0.9784,3,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,1,0,0,3,15,14,0,0,7,0,28,3,0,6,2,35,51,8,0,6,8,1,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,9,3,0,0,7,2,0,0,11,2,0,0,10,2,41,12,25,38,5,26,0,2,0,1,14,11,0,5,15,139,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20604217717229367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364740217180099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375935187380036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19957894909630813,0.0,0.0,0.148830913046953,0.10191370471129962,0.0,0.0,0.1012577879968316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393558827743287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353349307267622,0.0,0.0,0.11772766027802704,0.0,0.0,0.4724984524018031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119037010625244,0.0,0.0,0.12061229799717707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180456102977852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15915999456734092,0.0,0.0,0.19897395836076068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578541012576768,0.10168631932226513,0.10660819030850448,0.2256181878584996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689569594414555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11822500923669332,0.0,0.0,0.08568829087134028,0.0,0.0,0.12510331244696365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3628864129604964,0.0,0.09621695793435978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673652092906947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899759701583603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497018278111599,0.14438486188898525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649346199486108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19461613740549552,0.0,0.09296203148332756,0.19936165497528496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166439628820534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725538205388611
mentalhealth,AllyWaller,2020/04/01,"Journalist Looking for Sources for Article About Mental Health + Technology Hello,

I'm a reporter with [The Daily Dot](https://www.dailydot.com/author/allysonwaller/), and I'm currently working on a story about how increased dependency on technology during a time such as this — when many are staying home and taking proper precautions in social distancing — can affect mental health. As someone who has dealt with mental health issues, I know I've experienced some fluctuation in moods/emotions due to having to work from home and life being sort of upended due to federal/local government precautions being put in place to tame the spread of the coronavirus. For my story, I'm not only wanting to talk with experts, but just everyday people who've had to deal with addressing their use of technology in lieu of all this and how it has affected their own mental health. Please feel free to respond to this thread with your own experiences or feel free to privately DM me to share with me as well.

Thank you.",15.303790476190475,10.836874245714283,13.383857142857144,51.055976190476215,52.257142857142846,16.695238095238096,48.5952380952381,14.06817628641468,6.6931523809523785,823,34,121,22,6,261,112,175,0.011000000000000001,0.8640000000000001,0.125,0.9648,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,2,2,8,5,0,0,6,0,8,5,0,6,1,27,19,12,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,5,0,3,0,5,10,0,0,3,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,1,4,8,7,35,16,5,16,0,0,1,0,11,7,0,4,6,79,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13313620395413656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14526351920948508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12632230950119794,0.0,0.0,0.13059269091649886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5490730805167473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590730470576337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478712467428827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07097118546552829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912143970599978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844388153883958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309262494746031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5205652535491901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821570813919638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952843025272511,0.0,0.13492232876343624,0.14175537958077214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981993968439084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164051795293547,0.10941869847328337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13764454222218622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709613952053574,0.1037966976976364,0.0,0.11889345274669218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753017436150479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153426889617757,0.0,0.0,0.0761692794511038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11611109097088562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18802884632903136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,daniel-esp5,2020/04/01,"Doing things right away Once I get an idea in my head I need to do it right away and I expect results right away. It’s exhausting to think this way and idk what it is. Example, if I have to go to the store later I tend to get anxiety at work bc I want to just go to the store get it done with. I’m not satisfied until I reach that point. Or if I do something like post a song or selfie or anything I expect it to blow up or get a bunch of reactions right away. It’s like my brain doesn’t understand patience or the fact that I can do things later. Does anyone else feel like this? I’m not expecting a diagnosis but is this just anxiety?",2.3645652173913017,3.1459600942028985,4.24272463768116,89.22365217391304,74.86956521739131,8.128695652173914,23.220289855072465,8.548686976883017,1.1437368115942042,495,13,117,9,10,169,76,138,0.075,0.8740000000000001,0.051,-0.253,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,7,0,10,3,2,1,1,26,24,11,0,7,12,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,14,3,0,0,4,1,2,2,3,1,0,0,1,2,12,3,18,23,1,19,0,0,0,0,0,12,0,7,6,76,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20847092481152285,0.0,0.0,0.0952733590640227,0.13961036776750324,0.112127073239543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5120679662730886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15210675178621846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192385384992149,0.13943718885885992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138243989394702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06889512456446521,0.09734130928730213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28475253227421043,0.0,0.15487484273963664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13983795962519005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15381643200797734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19970338823116845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103209300408232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14510818661860034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12880595609119627,0.0,0.1304955775473457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4654474972971796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489652099124136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18104485579104726,0.08730733913307945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14184729500462406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036731548972734,0.10815366578547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919598638054164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LawlessMind,2020/04/01,"I need to talk with someone wiser than me I have problem with very high standards for myself, but then being too lazy to actually do something. It's a circle. I hate the person I was, I dislike the person I am when I look objectively at myself. I hate not being perfect even tho I know perfection in theory it's not possible. It's just.. why am I like that.  Why I'm not doing anything in order to be more competent, instead of just being miserable because I'm not what I want to be?",1.0536363636363608,3.3620606262626254,4.010909090909092,82.33636363636366,84.15151515151516,6.428282828282829,24.15151515151515,7.686295010490155,1.584951515151515,378,15,72,7,11,135,64,99,0.253,0.628,0.11900000000000001,-0.9427,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,7,7,2,1,3,0,11,0,0,0,2,16,19,4,0,3,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,1,1,14,3,12,13,1,7,0,1,1,0,3,4,0,0,3,59,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.2143486465084139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18075486331004784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389780777694826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14507806066641826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4337217095165747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320743757424524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071498336612095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073108619811547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844523417532176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16286915936766472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835832717100649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476246032179661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101772794350158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861104091682469,0.16909882480357755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17654794060209653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18123588664616866,0.12955642831153566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3964034930743712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Potatatas01,2020/04/01,"Shout out to everyone who had life kinda figured but then lost their job cos of covid, found a new shitty job working nights and now are lost... Can't be just me who's struggling to switch over to night shifts on a shitty job they had to take. I work in a supermarket warehouse picking orders all night and it sucks but the pay is decent. The worst thong is my days off. What am i supposed to do till 6am apart from masturbate, play video games and drink. Also my gf is asleep so im creeping around the house trying not to wake her up...",2.0536363636363646,3.9597834545454593,2.752727272727274,94.91909090909094,78.0909090909091,5.490909090909091,20.090909090909093,6.2581,-0.0936181818181816,420,10,93,3,10,131,85,110,0.21899999999999997,0.7559999999999999,0.025,-0.9773,3,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,4,5,6,1,1,6,0,10,4,2,2,1,15,15,9,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,4,5,1,0,2,4,1,0,2,5,0,0,5,1,8,1,16,9,2,17,0,2,0,0,7,8,1,1,8,57,12,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13586071880008305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123783733633214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956479146415476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16642721250060544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623368733867357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18627526944210485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19602988534408786,0.0,0.0,0.18351001178045315,0.0,0.5057678904560519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199981079422459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3709093174839236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16408051531762186,0.0,0.4782898789677709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760558457118647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277358992275829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534394348639837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24736342644687775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cbdadvisors,2020/04/01,"How often do you sleep especially during this quarantine period? Hi,

I hope everyone is doing well during this period. Please, try as much as possible to stay safe and healthy.. At the moment, virtually everyone is away from work especially in those areas mostly affected by the **corona virus**. Now, you have enough time to work on yourself. What have you been doing with it? Something beneficial to your well-being, I suppose? 

Well, if you have not been doing so, you may want  to start today. As there is no much work to do at the moment; ensure to eat well, exercise well, **sleep well** and stay at home. Although the number of hours for sleeping varies from person to person, the recommended number of hours is usually between 7-9 hours which you should start working towards. You shouldn't be filled with panic and overthink things as that could impair your sleeping cycle, ultimately, your mental health. I believe it's gonna end soon and everyone will go back to their normal way of life.

Sleep is so important to your overall health that improving it is one of the essential things we can work on to make our overall health better.

Stay safe! Stay healthy! Stay at home! Read more [here](https://blosumcbd.com/blog/cbd-for-sleep/)",3.7699095022624434,6.8717039321267,4.116855203619913,80.68623303167423,79.81447963800906,7.0199095022624425,23.432126696832576,8.139509932561175,1.8074217194570128,983,33,164,20,26,307,129,221,0.03,0.789,0.18100000000000002,0.9833,0,1,1,0,0,0,53.0,2,11,1,6,13,10,0,1,6,0,23,11,5,3,0,23,30,13,0,7,2,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,2,2,12,7,1,2,0,2,0,2,3,1,5,1,2,0,17,9,34,21,5,34,0,0,0,0,17,10,0,5,16,119,29,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724835261452143,0.05932241052716732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691990569913018,0.0,0.06823155137716287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061596774823753024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07894214386612583,0.0,0.0,0.06833064460565105,0.07971499150486502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22115600460306573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04384525278805504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460156445873529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15477240930505326,0.07662583716352295,0.2279271046026906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054492245166449294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05149720208781724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774751118203024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342600298093525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558911939421238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05227779917454217,0.0,0.0,0.09051710573958496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347261346535129,0.0,0.08468585165012439,0.0,0.08697330696392575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716934641537987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4632251078738839,0.0,0.0,0.05939266052628489,0.0,0.0,0.10921216679914557,0.4111500148195592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250802942192623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04498589265281491,0.0,0.07312772782523855,0.0,0.0,0.05237874625449078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849681390882508,0.0,0.045504165831093374,0.061236863682123874,0.0,0.0,0.4161944324359851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2808250211254108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Stellar404,2020/04/01,"Quarantine is hell Woke up in a very low mood, quarantine is hell and I hope we don't have to do it for too long.",7.330384615384617,2.7361097307692326,8.165384615384614,82.82961538461541,67.07692307692308,13.476923076923079,33.69230769230769,11.20814326018867,2.939892307692308,87,2,24,2,1,30,22,26,0.34600000000000003,0.5670000000000001,0.087,-0.8655,0,2,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,4,6,0,4,2,1,0,0,1,3,2,1,1,15,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6344884672564648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5653320924886485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.527090134721708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OGShua,2020/04/01,"A close family member passed last year due to mental health and substance abuse issues. Today is his birthday. Please read this. I wrote this last year when I found out he had passed.  It has just been sitting on my phone.  While the message is not a new revelation to anyone, it never hurt to hear someone say these things to me.  So I thought that I would share it.


The path of life is not paved solely in joyous moments, there are twisted unknown parts that lead us through the darkest of forests, hills that seem insurmountable, rivers that we cannot ford, and past demons that others cannot see.⁣⁣


We cannot make this journey alone and we should not try.  We must know, and remind others, that there is always an ear that will listen, a hand to offer aide, a back to share the load, and a shoulder to cry on.  No one must ever think that they need to face these challenges alone.  Call on others and find the strength you need in them.⁣


Please know that I love you and that no matter the challenge ahead of you I will stand beside you.  Please do not think it will ever make you lesser by asking for help, it makes you stronger than you know.


I miss you so much James.",5.133947368421055,5.926801342105267,4.311684210526316,91.22278947368422,68.47368421052633,6.606315789473682,23.971929824561403,5.6839178017228535,0.31942245614035114,918,20,191,3,15,270,137,228,0.083,0.765,0.152,0.9357,0,2,0,0,1,0,26.0,5,8,1,5,9,8,0,0,12,0,19,7,4,4,5,42,38,11,0,6,5,0,1,0,0,7,2,4,0,0,24,13,0,0,9,1,0,4,10,2,0,1,5,5,24,6,22,26,2,29,1,2,0,1,29,7,0,1,16,128,48,4,0.0,0.14958113956800853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26150604248664105,0.0,0.0,0.10504697740481132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827429995023423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802318381463432,0.0,0.0,0.09707555877461613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12891151682714214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867555647346866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22839388699326504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901371077655305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538676781285576,0.0,0.0,0.1384224758419358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419383980627686,0.14228867741430332,0.0,0.08462018735255022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13514920116386955,0.0,0.0,0.13176826516038542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208144880479505,0.20581505593279367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917144636248203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394215228384034,0.0,0.25281101814202844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722650722149764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092805505719487,0.18721996096409613,0.09736887603040807,0.121929396401947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554771327189653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671236535690465,0.1205163123625615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41574135117833133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628039482843034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039606988915384,0.0,0.0,0.10060190079732877,0.11492982704843825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696802167694132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387238605603445,0.1617869742014923,0.0,0.1002254054186913,0.0,0.0,0.11966666521924378,0.0,0.0,0.08571290369665496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518586713705286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968170018286555,0.0,0.0,0.1625968669868694
mentalhealth,freetheblueeyedgirl,2020/04/01,"Thought about suicide for the first time      I have been really doing bad in the last week. I feel so empty, lost, alone (even though I know I'm not), and exhausted. In the last week I tried alcohol and cigarettes for the first time. The cigarettes are especially bad because I have a chronic lung disease but I really don't care because I just want my emotions to stop. I also have slit my wrists and deep down I want someone to see it, to see how much pain I'm in because I'm not strong enough to admit it to anyone or even really to myself. 
     Thanks to whomever listened to my rant.",4.19916666666667,5.0422213418803405,5.241955128205127,83.52908653846156,70.62393162393163,8.585042735042737,28.30021367521368,8.841846274778883,2.0678213675213675,455,16,93,8,8,150,69,117,0.25,0.677,0.073,-0.9674,0,1,3,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,4,8,8,0,0,6,0,7,6,2,1,0,16,22,9,1,2,5,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,3,1,1,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,3,4,13,3,15,19,2,14,0,1,2,0,2,5,0,1,9,61,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16763162322697436,0.0,0.16245576479292187,0.0,0.1254378827194317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10967753382377522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26193682592084105,0.2868543337975625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599253960342132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764421637222969,0.0,0.16207443174278688,0.0,0.20720414138735627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931123064144951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26684368429451144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620409028791166,0.2557175505355143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17122712096995188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153073884281151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669061042182135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014583818754428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24998823856219834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290378764996286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311388446532244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17157527359170893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444121563982547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15411046463361489,0.12452633777902798,0.18292827611232984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649509426439717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18503575500108774,0.0,0.2516412371609824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RevolutionaryLion,2020/04/01,"Suffering from extremely vivid dreams I'm a 20 year old guy, been depressed and anxious since 16 cos of long term emotional abuse and neglect by my Dad and stepmum and then cos of bullying in school. I was also diagnosed with OCD by a doctor when I was 18 or 19, can't remember which.

I've been to a lot of counselling and been on antidepressants and that to varying degrees of success, but in the end I'm still the same really. Anyway, I had been going to counselling (before all the coronavirus stuff) in my Uni city, been to about 12/13 sessions before it got cancelled. I noticed a few sessions in as the topics of the sessions got more extreme and upsetting that I started getting really vivid dreams. At first they often involved by Dad or people that had hurt me in the past.

As time has gone on and I've worked through certain things however, the dreams have tended to be less about topics like that and most of the time are just completely random. Last night I had a dream where I was mates with Cristiano Ronaldo and I took him for a night out (???), it wasn't upsetting at all but it was extremely vivid, like I was actually there. This happens every single night without fail unless I was drunk when I went to sleep.

My counselling sessions have been focusing on trying to release this inner tension or emotion or whatever that is stuck inside of me that I can feel every day wanting to escape but I can't seem to let it. I don't really know what to do about the dreams or how to release these feelings.",6.489609843937572,6.547757200680272,6.607086834733895,78.49575630252102,65.42857142857143,9.50268107242897,33.62064825930372,9.168548406835145,2.893209123649459,1203,48,224,19,17,385,160,294,0.121,0.77,0.109,-0.5866,1,0,0,0,1,0,27.0,0,0,1,4,13,12,0,3,15,0,28,4,1,3,3,42,46,26,0,1,11,2,2,2,1,0,2,0,0,1,17,13,1,1,5,6,0,4,5,8,0,1,22,5,21,4,44,22,10,36,0,5,3,0,7,13,0,10,21,164,38,9,0.0,0.15080526758102614,0.12420632709418745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178528443289883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14378948521887575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21661077739557816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345002175313725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208467879093409,0.0,0.1096255545094903,0.12918590447613948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302758518147256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28634437111155114,0.11273176349055915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21447675588895007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12871257062939293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826378649020356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649822947186237,0.0,0.07233581207981209,0.0,0.2035939152229731,0.0,0.0,0.1260266097040792,0.11255274670143277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625522244141453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994942563611321,0.10374969288169207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13015180257496306,0.0,0.12436456437775835,0.0,0.0,0.1126382573741259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108208388199635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583292639850332,0.0,0.0,0.1449084322985529,0.13355831203929935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150258238573855,0.08823950499351191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24461531459762184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441827404012717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881354063040268,0.0,0.11587037892033583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528682898847623,0.0,0.1273713124496822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09008900932331156,0.0,0.10164548749909727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457044534216512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455877297343815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14843527498434886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14141208861078353,0.08641435286862394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507268356549003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798927227807347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269279267807205,0.0,0.09266091384457076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196375594077783
mentalhealth,anfal857,2020/04/01,I spent nearly 3 years ( June 2018 - March 2020 ) doing research on OCD & Anxiety Disorders for a documentary I have finally finished making. Please share your thoughts: I spent nearly 3 years ( June 2018 - March 2020 ) doing research on OCD & Anxiety Disorders for a documentary I have finally finished making. Please share your thoughts: [https://youtu.be/QAAg4-acmgA](https://youtu.be/QAAg4-acmgA),15.338421052631581,16.68321336842105,10.65859649122807,52.48684210526318,46.89473684210528,13.915789473684216,45.31578947368421,13.023866798666859,6.59022105263158,330,15,38,9,3,91,28,57,0.061,0.7759999999999999,0.162,0.6808,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,0,4,10,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,6,2,6,6,0,14,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,10,18,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4104582196355915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28980114040176586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4341678463574236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4149857775272214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528695473141195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4158376009275207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007458268693069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439517655430965
mentalhealth,AlternativeTip3,2020/04/01,I'm spiraling down into a bad hole.... Everyday lately I tell myself is my last day and it's time to give up. I haven't eaten in 3 days. I've only gotten 3-4 hours of sleep a night lately even though i'd like nothing more than to just sleep forever.. Honestly i'm scared. Don't know what to do...,-0.3383736263736239,1.5471224153846137,2.7360439560439573,91.98538461538462,86.38461538461539,6.175824175824177,16.978021978021978,7.447530270364453,0.1997252747252749,227,5,53,4,7,81,51,65,0.107,0.8009999999999999,0.092,-0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,2,0,4,3,2,0,0,4,10,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,4,2,9,8,1,13,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,10,26,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846846088395824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28529880860992823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14609406549665555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21218583048010625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21782782814371215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156036967483375,0.1802995650880336,0.49902444359007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806237708694644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20757205366216971,0.0,0.21223799801212406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682251425132993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22145001426611216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4426999560482014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19333001656242754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21731828488711094,0.0,0.12897780600622574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,juror94,2020/04/01,"I’m struggling. Oct 15, 2019–was in a bad car accident, in which I was hurt. Missed lots of work. 

Jan. 15 —was fired from my job in a now no existent industry, without cause. 

March 15–former employer lies regarding unemployment benefits, so I’m jobless and waiting for the appeals process which takes 10 weeks. 

March 30–computer breaks, but I have no money to fix it. 

Wife and I can’t work because of coronavirus. We’re broke. Ex employer is reminding me daily that there are actual bad people in the world. I gave my life to them the last few years. And this is how they treat me. 

I’m just over it. I hate feeling helpless. And so worried about money. 

And this feels like everyone’s story. Everyone is in this same situation. Uggg.",1.7794774706550562,4.562618352517988,3.1379780386217355,85.59508519500191,88.49640287769785,7.242862552063611,26.02082544490723,8.20500826718156,2.2981280575539573,577,26,109,15,19,187,99,139,0.26,0.674,0.065,-0.9817,6,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,2,2,7,11,1,1,5,0,7,1,0,2,0,15,17,9,0,0,3,2,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,2,0,2,1,4,8,0,0,2,3,11,3,14,15,3,15,0,4,0,0,5,7,0,1,7,62,19,6,0.0,0.0,0.1986814849210414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399902931815676,0.12411095525976175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20915039411353334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38909167361554253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058897099602662,0.14544987082186264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20101007095900436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179549992036913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20203879218672025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16595888087251254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380671401350886,0.09946730130500654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730910473837051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114865394509382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22885176817990316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128439851728603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530797463766711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16331338233591905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962604225459752,0.0,0.2964423534208435,0.2067628258835107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13110991300524216
mentalhealth,Duckerino117,2020/04/01,"I'm stuck and my PC broke. I don't post much on reddit anymore because i tend to deal with my mental issues better but a week ago my PC broke, my GPU fried so i don't even get a display. My dad said he'd buy me a new one (I'm broke due to COVID), but then he hasn't really gotten back to me in 3 days. This is now my 5th day with nothing to do and I'm having real thoughts and wishes of death, I'm smoking way too much and i feel almost exactly how i did in my very darkest days. I genuinely just hope i don't cut myself because I'm too old for that shit now. 

Hope you're all good, thanks for reading i guess.",1.4458992805755386,1.95212528057554,3.6684100719424464,93.51930575539568,76.76978417266187,6.423309352517986,21.8136690647482,6.2581,0.11713755395683467,470,11,118,3,10,163,88,139,0.17300000000000001,0.6829999999999999,0.14400000000000002,-0.7445,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,1,9,10,2,0,3,0,9,1,1,1,2,20,26,9,1,3,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,0,2,1,1,0,4,5,0,1,5,2,19,5,12,20,3,17,0,3,0,0,5,3,1,4,12,64,21,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14923350343729758,0.0,0.16857977267793187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669595137414758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945196073685494,0.0,0.20525110125544133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14889327711735784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32571849356048105,0.17356306984669534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119462003959908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512360898774128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795674356063639,0.0,0.0,0.14120530421671754,0.0,0.0,0.18545822750057406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3344221779180176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17571529335730227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16965877946438468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475155401465369,0.0,0.0,0.16259498925305765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16153786580375218,0.0,0.17665664628563996,0.0,0.11407937651240235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612342613209985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839712198946494,0.19162093629905516,0.10785032257222917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014088916597974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17281046082557808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499550107720916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365233649820013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13890767122602798,0.0,0.13362963511734038,0.13504146956262286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19359598981221907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dickmeister369,2020/04/01,"I'm seeking Help. Hello
I'm a 20yo college student. I'm Indian and I'm currently pursuing my degree in Budapest (Hungary). Ever since i came here i have been having inferiority complex seeing all these people from different parts of the world. I have many cool friends from my college and we used to hangout before this lockdown. The thing is lately due to being in isolation i have been thinking too much. I'm single and i make up things in my mind which says I'm single because I'm a brown guy. I am skinny and i have poor body image. Sometimes i cry for nothing. I am planning to hit the gym after this lockdown but I  am anxious about working out too. I'm really weird. I need your help.",1.839347826086957,4.2895532246376815,3.9878550724637662,82.85786956521741,81.97101449275362,5.998840579710145,25.86666666666667,7.3011,1.5770805797101457,547,23,100,8,15,187,88,138,0.09699999999999999,0.8320000000000001,0.071,-0.3377,2,3,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,1,0,2,5,4,0,0,5,1,12,2,2,2,2,16,27,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,6,7,1,0,2,2,1,1,0,2,0,0,3,4,16,2,14,22,5,12,0,1,2,0,8,6,0,0,5,67,22,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231637274633308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204184182927928,0.0,0.16809180594375378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194221668914515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259328866921329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169881760051825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063870291621826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786860431992711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15261874642093126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955954424505908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648135053326376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228334795881932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185933915505166,0.20027433499007974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994588686904074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14521446981294608,0.14647324616697302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895447495823418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21391633500907806,0.0,0.13694921303804966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265490433627676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709156420442538,0.0,0.0,0.1574136315857732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16340694991776905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953718965861843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624733086394112,0.12657551671730904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17061094793003814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381131479980025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hamsterthings,2020/04/01,"I (19F) have been extremely stressed and irritably over the past months for no apparant reason I (19F) have a pretty busy student life usually, with always something to keep me busy. I have been stressed about uni and other things for quite some time as well, but it was always manageble. I have never had any trouble keeping up with the work, I passed all my semesters, but lately (especially now I am staying home because of the pandemic with my 3 roommates) I have been extremely irritable at random moments. 

I get irritable from small disagreements, or when my roommates don't take care of the cleaning tasks, or when a friend does something slightly irresponsible. Things that I rationally know are not really a problem. Except I get really irritable, emotional, anxious and stressed about it.

I don't know what the cause for this is, the only things I can think about are that I am on the pill or that this is just my worrisome personality. I'd love for you to give your opinion on this, it would really help me out.

TL;DR  
Very irritable, anxious and stressed lately for basically no reason, need some advice",8.503798379837981,8.494281693069308,8.395580558055807,67.5780873087309,61.277227722772274,11.701890189018906,38.16561656165617,11.20814326018867,4.442924752475248,890,40,150,22,11,288,119,202,0.23199999999999998,0.6579999999999999,0.11,-0.9823,0,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,0,2,8,10,0,4,10,0,20,3,0,3,2,33,32,12,0,3,8,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,1,14,8,0,2,5,0,0,1,6,6,1,0,5,0,21,4,24,26,3,20,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,7,11,110,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11122395243745184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894153387195948,0.0,0.0,0.07740175757633055,0.0,0.0,0.25716925050647443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693838437176605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160474573072366,0.11692487764909945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960497655309104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128032601259773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793733882393084,0.0,0.1189328955956332,0.10918687443282878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629139764836654,0.0,0.11417111574740985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20233755677807266,0.0,0.0,0.1251054020870515,0.0,0.2567886797054044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039469642127989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272733163046137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085033683939492,0.0,0.0,0.0843963653147895,0.08778528944708718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865655235813046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865442629263854,0.0,0.09938356056349852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11579623980443045,0.0,0.10891072640722337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106197847199705,0.0,0.0,0.21874873890019936,0.23405260302975034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17524896975992724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12131737469820608,0.0,0.0,0.5215234167085226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557875633708535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268515973496741,0.07293149997238857,0.0,0.0,0.06636957556100269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535706184642262,0.0939137290136745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233818575381136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828625880688704,0.0,0.0,0.08085472822137853,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fixmytoasters,2020/04/01,"Lost desire to learn I was wondering if anyone here has experienced a loss in the desire to learn. I'm currently doing my undergraduate degree in Computer Science. I'm horribly behind on lecture content and my dissertation. I'd go to classes just wanting them to be over. Moreso, I feel like I don't even want to read about anything (academic or non-academic). I'm worried about what this mass disinterest in, well, basically everything in my life means. 

Sometimes, I'm filled with panic, realising how much time and space I'm wasting - I'm at university - I thought I wanted this! So many people would love to be in my position! I'm so behind and what's going to happen if I fudge this whole degree up and graduate with a 2:2? I'm just very lost and very insecure - feeling like I'm just nowhere near smart enough to be here...",3.332075471698112,5.7039312641509445,5.24211320754717,76.35901886792455,75.98113207547169,8.516729559748429,28.838993710691824,9.21078282632365,2.904992955974841,657,29,118,17,15,225,97,159,0.157,0.731,0.11199999999999999,-0.7559,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,3,12,10,0,2,3,0,8,2,0,1,0,27,31,11,0,8,6,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,7,1,0,3,1,5,1,0,4,3,11,5,24,23,3,17,0,3,0,1,2,12,0,4,4,72,16,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202119020781216,0.0,0.14147720707024253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17764144614462174,0.0,0.11355289951477117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15451246236546048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17385791892228872,0.2456423087242671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19541453783812446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203011030555855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12143363565991913,0.16798486926852274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3753464758285176,0.0,0.15516637187309792,0.0,0.0,0.17430198509738426,0.0,0.18727352454723795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263824960622859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201713495301874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191891097341006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17196858503618775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003531385536538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648691214457812,0.1002491360293884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837074100697093,0.30421225686313136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15457857938544364,0.0,0.0,0.19194484084076324,0.0,0.0,0.18644214089187935,0.0,0.17459519771792398,0.0,0.12212849908365075,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imdummy1122,2020/04/01,"Feels like my brain has shut off It’s hard to describe, but I’ve had this problem for a while and it has gotten progressively worse over time. 

Basically, it feels like my brain is never “on”. If I need to think about something, like REALLY think about something, I have to actively decide to think about it.

For example...

Situations where I don’t need to “think” (the answers are pretty obvious and don’t involve reflection or real decisions) - Am I hungry? What should I watch on TV? Should I do laundry?

In contrast, my therapist asked me how I was feeling these days, and I said “pretty neutral”. They asked what made it “neutral”, and although I told them it was because I felt neither good nor bad, I realized that I said “neutral” because it’s a non-answer and I haven’t really evaluated how I feel about my life. So I asked myself, how DO I feel about my life right now? And it felt like I was skimming the surface of a lake with a net and not really catching anything, because the question really needed me to THINK about my life and my feelings about it. But I couldn’t just THINK about it. It feels like there’s a little button in my brain that I just have to hit in order to activate it, but I can’t, or don’t want to. 

That’s just one example. The same thing happens when a friend asks how I liked the movie we just watched. It takes me so much effort to decide if I really like it or not that I usually just say, “it was good!” because I’d have to boot up my brain to generate a single critical thought. It’s not like a fear of having an opinion on something. It’s like my brain literally doesn’t have the energy to even form a complex thought.

Sometimes it’s hard for me to concentrate while I’m reading, like I read each word but the meaning doesn’t fully reach my brain. I used to be very, very advanced as a kid and I had excellent reading comprehension, so this is a relatively new thing.

My brain just feels sort of empty. It’s easier not to press the “THINK” button, easier to not really think about things too deeply. 

I also have some memory issues, like I’ll send a text and immediately forget what I sent. Sometimes I can’t even recall the gist of the message, or who I sent it to. But then I’ll look at the text and be like, “oh, yeah, I remember now.” 

When my coworkers ask what I did over the weekend, I draw a blank. I usually say “nothing” to avoid the embarrassment of having to switch my brain on a try to recall anything I did.

I guess it’s nonessential information, so my brain doesn’t try to store it. I have trouble remembering everything I did the day before, or what I had for lunch sometimes. It’s just “little” stuff like that, I can remember events, or conversations that I actively tell myself I should remember. But the little day to day stuff drifts away because it’s not as important and the days tend to blur together. I keep a journal and a planner to document what I do each day, otherwise it all blends.

Does anyone else experience stuff like this? I’m going to talk to my therapist about it, but I don’t know if I can describe it well enough to make sense. It just feels like my brain is... gone.",4.851277955271564,5.349009583067094,5.876119808306707,80.80807747603833,68.98402555910543,9.390990415335462,29.54776357827476,9.451951473030183,2.447015463258785,2453,87,500,49,40,815,248,626,0.06,0.778,0.162,0.9964,0,1,3,0,0,0,74.0,1,0,2,5,37,26,0,3,33,1,46,14,10,7,3,113,98,47,0,12,30,0,14,15,1,3,3,4,0,1,51,17,1,2,36,5,1,8,20,6,1,1,22,21,72,20,63,69,10,49,0,0,3,0,26,20,0,15,35,344,123,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037802634753822416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033053011275021325,0.048434768179300085,0.07780007868792094,0.0,0.22096021308230565,0.0,0.04441269949196384,0.0,0.03946934508217431,0.14407994051200188,0.0,0.040224174581074905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5277011570903324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829154665238956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04136720691020429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039488889428057734,0.0,0.0,0.048843622144116285,0.0,0.06244415408274594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042484163983845316,0.04624014912121768,0.0,0.05319306374169135,0.2151149299505349,0.13508176577405906,0.09077522572596862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03652148934871064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026865222206820676,0.0792974135859237,0.0,0.0,0.05207438152059245,0.0,0.041801625822431084,0.0,0.08469113628680347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049338685851845865,0.0,0.042016673597038215,0.0,0.0,0.025978928125949947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001668036005056,0.34641364635989713,0.14213400618612784,0.0,0.0,0.0396957692860425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04472900236798786,0.031553787220852066,0.0,0.0,0.05149202209902811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034749654527530704,0.10515263475571016,0.03645834131886189,0.04565466637857383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04535783916009237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03203208105782078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618328676299166,0.0,0.04523200255588479,0.0,0.0,0.05295438488878661,0.0,0.14185150093848506,0.05380479409649947,0.18169823750939848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21419550001012813,0.040369211097500905,0.08993117072091429,0.07518365893323012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053134631147452135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109174671443172,0.14025680607800767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234209882279574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03554194020242761,0.037994672507021765,0.04131697376619455,0.0,0.0,0.10977064503320694,0.09421433838170107,0.24231499702397,0.0,0.07505585333931153,0.027564124402067684,0.0,0.0,0.045169505843307325,0.0,0.06418786835800529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04082700234226111,0.10412474746765678,0.0780071196090647,0.02788168498646188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04250234327033189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481732296962512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,caelarini,2020/04/01,"Why Do I Never Want To Settle... I'm in a relationship. But I feel like he's not enough. Like I want more. But I don't know what I want. So then I will get in this mood where I want to reach out to old flings or past relationships. I know that's probably a little crazy and probably not healthy. But the urge is so strong. I have so far not reached out to any (during this time of my feelings being wonky). But this seems to be a common thing for me.

Oddly, my sister is the same way. She'll burn through relationships, and often try to rekindle them. 

Is this normal human activity? Or have we suffered trauma from our childhood? 

I'm sitting in my car trying not to cry because I feel unhappy, and yet I've really nothing to be unhappy about...",1.1684210526315797,3.3662861052631605,3.175526315789476,89.21618421052631,82.6842105263158,6.16842105263158,21.34210526315789,7.413659706084162,0.7489263157894746,576,18,123,9,16,194,95,152,0.16399999999999998,0.767,0.069,-0.8586,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,2,0,1,1,7,6,0,0,5,0,12,0,0,0,1,30,25,13,0,5,10,1,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,6,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,0,3,18,3,18,20,3,19,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,4,10,83,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078650169625086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669146688496036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17423335509704824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638937889725159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24060460292458374,0.1133160351441879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287084946470424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17434353870987404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15498453380106353,0.1589759303473607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223352289633846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554110080016414,0.15219731447474116,0.0,0.16644188664379486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15141789930996444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34203196347077186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161412854537397,0.0,0.0,0.5108859758227717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439898332914916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537810407368793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249086348746248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21538109766353172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3742257264939397,0.12590281230907754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14312719476159275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,usefamin,2020/04/01,"Gaps in memory I'm hesitant to ask this under mental health, because I'm not certain if it's physiological or psychological. I want to know if anyone else experienced this and if they had some diagnosis for something similar.

I've turned 30 this year, but for the past 4 years I've been having some problems with my memory. I quite literally never remember what I ate the day before or what I had done, let alone the week before.  

Dates and numbers are simply an unpleasant experience. I saw people on tv remembering the date of their graduation or the day they got their license and I always scoffed at the bad writing, because people can't remember such stuff, until I found out yes... people do.

I can remember pin numbers and other things, but I think the problem is long-term memory. 

Just to mention, I've never smoked marijuana or done any illegal drugs, but I have been on anti-depressants on and off for over a decade.

Anyone has any idea?",5.8945344506517685,7.016180050279331,7.301243016759777,69.28452746741158,66.93296089385476,10.435940409683424,31.11778398510242,10.504223727775694,3.4892342644320298,755,29,131,20,12,259,117,179,0.149,0.8440000000000001,0.006999999999999999,-0.978,0,1,3,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,4,1,2,4,0,0,9,1,15,3,0,0,3,36,26,16,0,6,12,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,9,7,1,0,8,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,10,2,15,1,18,15,2,20,0,0,1,0,7,9,0,9,11,88,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246013393565314,0.0,0.0,0.1001047161704757,0.0,0.0,0.16362520639883085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824232281548546,0.1232683133726028,0.0,0.0,0.11247041665721187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004509731561013,0.14667555498143045,0.0,0.20474408544948167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15517558904995965,0.0,0.10361988526059407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462308117499221,0.0,0.0,0.13951744363508095,0.0,0.10050071425415097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176829250254608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319099606490615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622016613532053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788027392607634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13581149054911695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06611735275492754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302163404892648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646754178150844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12124074113707595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18557570983314756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484624823116568,0.250216313809052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302343079206516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279608618382902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5451356331573005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261788668000293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772225657660908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992634922111849,0.07708760181698801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13085901743182415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709599407917935,0.0,0.09650268560047763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15494699249845958
mentalhealth,django_free,2020/04/01,"I think I have ADHD and I don't know what to do I (23M) have difficulty in focusing on something for too long. When I'm watching lectures online, I inevitably open another tab and start watching YouTube videos. I cannot concentrate on the work I'm doing. I'm starting a career in Data Science and it requires me to learn complex algorithms that I'm finding difficult to keep up with.

I first ignored it as a sign of procrastination but this is affecting my career now and I'm worried that I won't be able to succeed. 


It was work at first but now I can't even watch a full movie without opening reddit or Instagram on the side

I know this not serious as other mental problems but I would like some advise on how to handle without medications. My country is not big on mental health and I don't want to go to a Psychologist since my dad is one and I'm afrad he would find out about it",2.9489134438305697,4.649393541436466,4.762408839779006,82.41053775322284,74.91160220994476,7.478600368324125,29.19373848987109,8.238735603445708,2.135585340699816,705,31,139,12,15,240,110,181,0.077,0.8690000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.2263,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,6,7,6,0,0,6,0,16,2,0,2,0,36,30,14,0,4,8,1,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,10,10,0,3,7,1,0,1,9,4,0,3,1,3,16,2,25,25,2,24,0,0,3,0,3,15,0,2,9,96,26,10,0.17133078689387374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20590631122861688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796552686647303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131623688842686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31318647060417715,0.29146775961511195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737123451132183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18211661467939866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522866755654146,0.0,0.0,0.1883178395794113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370356822402145,0.0,0.0,0.15162235493563472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725977428826148,0.3453222715157667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609817527490505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16394042432924982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141726597402112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13189881021581748,0.0,0.0,0.24253762559640896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978185020763084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105533713762904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303135292246125,0.0,0.2494617067971273,0.17399473068503565,0.0,0.24341695057797036,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KarsonKrusher,2020/04/01,"[serious] Young (29yo) and unemployed doctor with suicide ideas First, thank you for opening the post. I'm sharing a bit of my story to try to prevent bad things to happen to me or hurting myself. Please share your thoughts or advise in life. Summary is that I spent all my life savings trying to get trained in the greedy USA healthcare system, went throught hell doing that, but to this day after 15 years of formal education and experience, I continue to be unemployed and financially useless, now struggling with COVID19 lockdown, depression and suicide ideas. 

Young male physician here, 29 yrs, from Latin America (yes, we also use reddit) I've been having suicide thoughts, but not currently depressed. I feel like a fucking failure in life.

Since school I aced exams, test, scores, got honors on my graduation, was extremely dedicated, learned guitar, learned english, I was always either the best or among the best and had high aspirations. Went to the University at age 16 and I stupidly decided to study medicine and become a miserable doctor, let me explain. Medicine is a TOUGH CAREER, very difficult. It is academically, mentally and economically demanding. The amount of stuff you need to study each year is massive, and drains you mentally, socially isolates you from family, friends, parties, relationships, etc.  A dark truth of a recent grad is that you are bullied by superiors or more experienced doctors, pretty much everywhere, medical residency is like that and I seriously suffered that BS during my 1-year medical internship, at that time they academically evaluated me, so I had no word to defend myself. But I graduated after 8 years of traning (in my country).

Escaping common crime violence in my country, I went to USA to become a doctor there, by passing the USMLE exams (the most difficult exams ever in my life) I spent 2 more years studying for those expensive exams, and another year getting doing unpaid clerkships to get experience and recommendations and connections. Life in the US as immigrant if TOUGH man! Nobody wants to employ you due to visa. You cannot earn any money. I did cleaning, mopping floors, dog walking and other odd jobs to support me (WHICH IS ILLEGAL AS FOREIGNER). When I had all the requirements, guess what? You have to pay fees of applications to participate in the selection process of residency in the USA each year, so I spent $5000 only in applications and flying tickets. I received few interviews in hopes to get a job, but did not get anything, and lost $5000. I tried again next year and the results were the same with same dollars lost. I felt fucking scammed, and to this day i'm still angry at my experience in the USA.  I spent like $70,000 of my third-world-hard-earned dollars in the whole process, paying rents, bills and educational courses to prepare and in the end the result was nothing. NOBODY WILL EMPLOY YOU IN HEALTHCARE IF YOU DON'T DO A RESIDENCY FIRST, which I failed to secure twice. And NOBODY will employ you at any job in the US if you are not citizen. 5 stupid years wasted + 8 years of home training.

I came back defeated to my country in hopes to get any job. I faced another reality and that is there are no jobs for doctors here, there are just too many doctors today. I lowered my life expectation even more and looked for any other job available, but then COVID-19 happened. My country is in lockdown, I'm quarantined, unemployed, with no money, no financial power, living with now elderly parents at my old home with rampant crime (paralized temporarily due pandemic), living off the charity of others, unable to move or look for job, unable to sleep due suicide thoughts, and writing this. Most of my classmates became specialists or got married or got jobs or moved to other countries. I feel like i'm in the starting line. I'm now almost 30 years old, indebted, single and poor. I'm ashamed of what I experienced, I'm ashamed to say I'm unemployed and have never had a real formal stable job, and still hunting for one. I'm a miserable unemployed doctor.

 You want to make it worse? Law in my country requires me to serve in the COVID emergency pandemic when system starts to collapse, totally UNPAID or I could be charged a fine or brief jail time for refusing. I want to fight the stupid pandemic, but at least want to be paid if my life is being risked, NOT EVEN NEW YORK IS OFFERING ME THAT CHANCE (I already tried to reach hospitals). they fucking need doctors right now and here I am unemployed and still no responses.

Failure is the word to describe what I am. I hate myself, I constantly punish myself for making bad decisions and I blame my extreme bad luck and also blame the silence of God despite me being religious. Education was in vain in my life. The only thing that prevents me from committing suicide is my parents, but after I bury them, I think I might take the shot. 

I'm sorry you had to read the long post, sometimes I feel I did nothing wrong: I studied, I graduated, I behaved, I followed the rules (and also the USA rules) did not became an asshole, murderer or alcoholic or anything, but still life kicks me in the balls. Then why can't I be offered a fucking job? I no longer care about medicine, I no longer care about myself, but I might care in what you have to say, please react to my life story. I will read you thoroughly",6.47096207473508,7.784068724948878,6.8635285369027725,72.2473061907418,65.73824130879345,9.853653095370886,35.47257854619818,10.018931242160765,3.8169660531697343,4255,202,707,96,66,1382,433,978,0.212,0.675,0.113,-0.9991,33,3,1,0,1,6,149.0,3,17,3,14,30,61,12,6,45,1,57,28,2,6,7,133,126,68,6,14,32,2,4,4,1,5,22,2,5,3,28,43,1,6,15,5,17,11,16,38,0,4,33,10,103,23,112,80,23,108,1,11,2,4,44,38,5,25,59,470,131,52,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04471940129483605,0.041901556379471135,0.0,0.046176814418346944,0.10038989494200992,0.03481825367722368,0.0,0.0,0.11382368708144558,0.08775591310149015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886946528835748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03217609411308975,0.1048160645953061,0.0,0.09242866226527338,0.0,0.0,0.08782714249003552,0.0,0.045683720577326205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04785934205068742,0.1279907900099378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0452193994750992,0.0,0.033409694686702296,0.0,0.0,0.053972911874132265,0.0,0.07208178773243966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3426396824787372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03706210236741204,0.0,0.04666805064929342,0.05527623589319328,0.03785104765562932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279682997261278,0.03944758502585872,0.0,0.06347401549837563,0.0597879149736063,0.04017760240484194,0.0,0.0,0.07118638817212497,0.0,0.0,0.03232921464089278,0.15473949754833552,0.13117319085374995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040140809126906,0.0,0.04609680184169186,0.0,0.0740064963204668,0.0,0.03748475174512339,0.04131311002006436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044211364142099946,0.0839475598455058,0.08312272296954938,0.0,0.0,0.044795759827185824,0.0944754475337233,0.0,0.0,0.4152454058698989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042789177433035085,0.2955624347237657,0.08177308813647874,0.0,0.07389950940825056,0.03703136095831913,0.07027824267134572,0.0,0.09135715788955702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055863502720597584,0.04242409346685843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430853511001772,0.08433950052336,0.08878151153660895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894887173082337,0.0307607674262899,0.062054827804966885,0.03227331532661134,0.04041400104520581,0.04450245525581978,0.0,0.0,0.08030249280649819,0.0,0.08781822761486051,0.0,0.0283551422020341,0.06364976311063136,0.0,0.0,0.0929274714273454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918661230562666,0.0,0.0,0.08015156722214037,0.042571239263235014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837123148180153,0.047628581639871784,0.0,0.0,0.04131672498438296,0.044925691297548656,0.0,0.03573525926046862,0.0,0.06655338241910674,0.0,0.04234920559503698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0346144787687802,0.0,0.041875053441145546,0.04265553821385762,0.0,0.0,0.041385610402752,0.046841865331301406,0.059235977196416864,0.0,0.1336693526733495,0.0,0.0,0.04374530556903635,0.047902323186430895,0.2288572813504875,0.0474850212886964,0.0,0.0,0.03146210721547763,0.0,0.0,0.03852510075072152,0.0,0.0,0.055599696180868734,0.02681247975232077,0.0,0.09966037130195668,0.04880011796201171,0.0,0.03966400946744608,0.0,0.0,0.11363958099702112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006683652112971,0.03614050098736705,0.0,0.034526370067767834,0.09872466808464446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11637173992561448,0.037758453778974334,0.046718262352320204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04264346034535742,0.0,0.045750756632586986,0.0,0.2964137099375717
mentalhealth,doorcloses,2020/04/01,"Have you used a mental health app to deal with Covid-19? Hi all,

I'm a journalist at the New Scientist and I'm writing a story about mental health apps, like Headspace and Talkspace. The story was originally about these apps in general and whether they work, but we've now reframed it around the current pandemic. 

Alot of these apps are offering free trials right now and providing free access to healthcare workers. Was hoping to talk to someone who has used one of these apps in the last few weeks about their experience. 

What did you like about it? What did you not? 

Would be so grateful for any help! We can talk by pm or you can email me on [jason.murugesu@newscientist.com](mailto:jason.murugesu@newscientist.com) 

Thank you again!

Jason",5.193654485049836,8.473058271317832,4.560160575858252,78.78017441860467,74.81395348837209,6.476411960132888,24.71816168327796,7.7094869923839395,1.3648533776301224,603,20,105,9,14,181,88,129,0.0,0.789,0.21100000000000002,0.9859,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,1,5,2,2,9,6,0,0,8,0,11,2,0,3,1,20,17,8,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,9,8,18,11,3,14,0,0,0,0,17,6,0,3,10,69,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376712194947393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511043238117407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20279569834482414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19241663958401084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41817948649075176,0.0,0.0,0.1318481777737516,0.0,0.0,0.1953738752511835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16034199954015932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922016573775271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3964676436317999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18998030181229145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332933719541217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798622170693658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16666872503376506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31621036457866897,0.0,0.18110085808589446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3397824074655384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577860379495059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320462829706054,0.0,0.0,0.13973460847468086,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vintagelawsuit,2020/04/01,"I'm scared, feel like a failure, and want to give up - and the timing is awful. TW: Abuse? Toxic workplace. Depression/anxiety. Suicide. 

For context, I work at a grocery store. First paragraph is kind of backstory because I'm emotions and not sure how to explain things without it. Probably TMI. 

Nearly a year ago I left a five year relationship I'd been wanting to leave for a couple of years, but was scared to because it gave me security in somewhere to live, which is something I hadn't had since I was about 12. This relationship was okay at first, I moved interstate to live with them for a few years, but it kind of quickly became emotionally and sexually abusive. I had moved to a new state, had no friends, no family here, and any attempts at making new friends had made my partner extremely jealous. Eventually I got a job with him, but was never taken seriously because coworkers often saw me as being favouritised because my partner at the time was a supervisor on the same department as me (didn't have any part in hiring me). I ended up losing shifts, trying to switch to other stores, only to end up back where I was because workloads and staff were shifting and I had a limited area of stores I could work at. 

After a few significant events, suicide thoughts/attempts and therapy, I realised this relationship was harmful to me, and I moved interstate again (to a new city altogether) to live with family. 

At first things were fantastic, I was taken seriously at work, and managers were telling me I had potential. I felt valued at my workplace for the first time ever, and it felt amazing. I was putting in extra time, taking extra shifts, earning enough money to actually live off, but most of all I was actually, genuinely happy. I was good at what I was doing, I loved it, I loved my coworkers, I loved coming to and being at work. 

Unfortunately after a few months, near Christmas, we had some manager changes and I had some family problems (family were trapped in bushfires four hours away from me, we had to put down family pets, family members were in/out of hospital), and this interfered with me being able to attend work. Everything has significantly gotten worse since then, our new manager is well, interesting I guess. He pushes off any and all jobs to whoever he can for the day, often putting the same jobs onto multiple people through the week. This has resulted in a lot of trouble because I'll be told I'm running x, but other person has been told that manager has said they never told me I'm running x, but I was never personally told otherwise.  Our store manager was never really someone to talk to about it, I had tried to speak to them before about under-staffing of shifts I was running, and that it was burning me out quickly. 

All of a sudden people were under the impression I was doing y and saying z about them, and it was causing conflict. I've learned from therapy that I have people pleasing tendencies, I don't like conflict, and I tried to clarify and fix these situations, but this often made it worse? After this, my shifts had been cut back from 36 hours (having to give up a really loved pet I no longer had time for due to the hours) and the need for me to do more, but I'd be going into overtime, to my base hours of 16. I was trying to save up for a car at this time, as I normally walk/use public transport, but my family was looking to move somewhere this wouldn't be possible, even if I switched stores.

I went from one month, unofficially running a department (unpaid for it) because I was the only one (they admitted) who knew what to do, proficiently, to then not running it, but being expected to run it one day, then not run it, and having that decision flip flopped on a day to day basis without being told until after my shift, where I would be yelled at every shift for not doing what my supervisors had wanted. I'm not sure how I was expected to know what to do when my job role was never clear to me? I'd try asking before doing, only to be told to just do my job and not waste time asking. I eventually asked to step back from managing shifts in my department of expertise. 

The other week we had a particularly stressful shift I was forced to take charge, because no one else was available. Essentially we had 12 hours of work to do in 2.5, with 2 people including myself. The manager knew we had this much work, and made no attempt at trying to get more staff in to help, even though budget could afford it. I was so overwhelmingly stressed from this shift that 2 hours in I had severe abdominal pain to the point I was almost blacking out. My manager was refusing to let me go home until the work was done. I was later told by my GP that it sounded very likely that an ovarian cyst had burst. This was before COVID shut downs and I was unable to get imaging to confirm this. Additionally, I was yelled at several times by several coworkers for not doing things the way they wanted to, when I wasn't aware of how they wanted to do things until afterwards, even though I was communicating with them throughout the shift trying to ask what they wanted/if they were okay with x/etc. (This is a recurring problem, with coworkers saying yes but changing their mind and not notifying me - only for management to tell me that was my fault for not communicating with them)

Week before last I had to call in to several shifts due to family again, sisters being pulled out of school due to COVID, family unable to organise time off work for them or babysitting. Way my family is, it's kind of a no choice if they want you to do something. Then was told the night before my other shift of the week that my family was going into quarantine, and if I wanted to continue working I had to organise somewhere else to live. I had to take the next day off to organise a living situation so that I could continue to work. Later I was messaged by my manager saying that if I wanted to keep taking days off then I should consider changing from part time to casual, and he refused to approve my leave to be paid, but offered me the option to take time off. I asked if I could take time off, and was then told to call 000 if I was experiencing issues, not him. I have now found out that he is now telling people that I am verbally abusing him, calling him lazy, incompetent, telling him he doesn't know how to do his job. 

I finally had a complete mental breakdown, took the next week off (had to ask new store manager to approve my leave - he is mostly aware of the situation, but is only temporary and I feel he doesn't like me so much and he never saw me when I had any real work ethic left)  and asked other stores if I could transfer. Today I got word that no other stores are accepting transfers because everyone has just done mass hires because of COVID. I'm scared that asking for these transfers will affect me at work further. 

I'm at my wits end. I don't know what to do. I can't take leave or quit my job because my manager refuses to I can't afford to pay for my basic necessities, and family can't help me because they're having their pay cut. Nowhere is hiring. I'm having severe mental breakdowns even thinking about having to go back to work. I've been thinking extremely negative thoughts about myself, and about how maybe things would be easier if I just took my months worth of antidepressants and locked myself in my car, not that I'd have the guts to hurt myself. The thoughts just scare me, and there is no support available because everything is shutting down. I feel like I'm failing being at basic adult things, and that everything that's happening is all my fault. I'm not getting sleep, I'm sleeping into the day, I'm not eating. I have so many bills due and I just want to give up. 

TLDR:

* Struggle with severe anxiety/depression
* Moved to new city with family 
* Was appreciated at work, did well 
* Events happened in personal life, resulting in me not being able to attend work
* Went from being praised and with max hours a week to minimum hours a week
* Constantly verbally abused by coworkers, rumours being spread
* No clear role anymore at work 
* Manager being abusive and rumour spreading 
* Several mental breakdowns, panic attacks before shifts
* Have been crying before/during/after every shift for the past three months
* Trying to leave, being denied
* Bills to pay, grateful to have a job but I'm mentally struggling, no other financial options
* Stress of everything is making me want to kill myself
* Don't know what to do, will take any suggestions/feedback, please help",6.69495492875836,6.881062704726826,7.287160608704081,73.35859784821169,64.9852670349908,10.370304028948986,33.10808051436141,10.138020789364004,3.325827599754451,6762,260,1213,143,95,2235,515,1629,0.13699999999999998,0.774,0.09,-0.998,11,2,2,0,2,5,199.0,7,1,15,31,51,59,5,11,55,4,171,11,3,14,15,211,278,90,3,33,45,1,5,5,4,6,3,8,3,6,71,66,1,8,21,1,17,35,45,28,2,11,116,18,160,31,231,131,23,221,1,4,4,4,104,73,0,22,115,866,231,53,0.0501181260920591,0.1484544601061586,0.04890806143924503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022213347412960324,0.0,0.025093031866441243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08520511091593612,0.0,0.019170114640540824,0.0,0.024851856970553508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18741472978545215,0.028508301858659036,0.023543814625657373,0.07707549071498851,0.0,0.19858503915959166,0.0,0.12794050178979985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676431542362326,0.0,0.0,0.025742560584878345,0.0795274979685478,0.021586163933072437,0.026273950835136086,0.02707994475751553,0.0,0.10003811383868158,0.027727376629435013,0.027526204073114197,0.1131271580608916,0.0,0.02158333428214047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05128824363389286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02564167749803594,0.041867263332439335,0.05637614613821515,0.06658467580443482,0.025892710836340968,0.02794747936048371,0.06620509921700092,0.0226673571835682,0.04222668280961357,0.02394500862303588,0.09008588019223376,0.0,0.30710490772387683,0.0,0.03801184565001183,0.05370659894136318,0.048121260620087265,0.027450978689600523,0.0,0.08526090490209777,0.0,0.02747596919908389,0.038721139895337736,0.0,0.03927697850059516,0.07211681004095319,0.05696657206157243,0.021018353163816197,0.040084043813769586,0.0,0.027605383128950042,0.0,0.04431929338555465,0.026675838583882384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0503896852121251,0.0,0.025136283426279837,0.0,0.1974250346918908,0.0,0.026826245274644143,0.0,0.0,0.0261551512710816,0.19893802717059303,0.022273646629708127,0.027724140451356873,0.07828547390977134,0.05508722279593156,0.020426480971105297,0.0,0.132669647613396,0.054453490642680034,0.025624589768030708,0.0176999573139484,0.061212962110617324,0.0,0.1327656706377701,0.0,0.02104330167236413,0.02803468168842401,0.0,0.021304319281159598,0.09046713108073656,0.07113447407084851,0.033454238340076554,0.02540595675320347,0.025175196996736496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101456638347056,0.0,0.02530251014061481,0.0,0.08000762018373568,0.13316909117957432,0.03684258934316095,0.018580977726396,0.11596256557999288,0.14521319545656536,0.053301195676648816,0.023516233121213242,0.024552561242241942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792267861455463,0.09529273325566792,0.026664609876287455,0.029401411207759263,0.0,0.05427304658196591,0.02392171116952192,0.08686399542912679,0.06564182183601776,0.0,0.05501465225827982,0.023688914383481623,0.028250328390987924,0.0,0.0,0.027017908312619947,0.04795627806932583,0.0,0.07557383916274706,0.0,0.026653398130492927,0.0,0.028522699873464362,0.03210695492253662,0.0,0.0,0.080712166856666,0.0,0.0,0.023836907424470637,0.05978391819403731,0.1003539747918772,0.025361109642107943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19816725924310447,0.0,0.04145823180977597,0.08450231039196243,0.050154320803339,0.0,0.021232462799167608,0.038583382015770586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08611521616047188,0.05239434720323837,0.0,0.05482109544368554,0.028436727781302025,0.047235740718106566,0.0,0.15073037417391244,0.02014152565596112,0.08761090250057392,0.0,0.05731444502426904,0.0,0.09988876800155268,0.03211367151855603,0.04924080442182309,0.03978819386808545,0.17534569418143994,0.0,0.02375306168830223,0.2155050776073229,0.05568308217328991,0.1361076711052361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030142967403320918,0.0,0.0,0.02067635141036201,0.147804846424841,0.03978143568512819,0.1407060818530026,0.0,0.04506221430173656,0.04646000499935789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048312085083244666,0.0,0.3101360379416692,0.0,0.05107465219910684,0.03560247881651285,0.0,0.0,0.06454886003195315
mentalhealth,Giuelith,2020/04/01,"Theories of Dual Diagnosis Prevalence Individuality is the barrier that makes people different. The way a person thinks, feels and acts are the things that make someone unique. Some may choose how they live; some will just go with the flow. Others may enjoy something will others may not even see the slightest fun underneath it. https://article-directory.org/article/696/11/Theories-of-Dual-Diagnosis-Prevalence",13.191052631578946,17.708168807017547,9.971789473684217,43.87452631578949,53.912280701754376,9.472280701754386,30.69824561403509,9.888512548439397,3.615641403508772,350,11,40,7,5,102,47,57,0.025,0.8690000000000001,0.107,0.7184,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,6,0,7,0,0,3,0,16,13,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,1,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,2,3,8,2,5,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,5,0,30,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34188171477510865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21612980778027915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654553902116153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18597018077434435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889467147206545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4368520363168441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22685743372834616,0.2857212813626235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607569017975016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27725768303403503,0.2519147025593516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21739453589843336,0.2096733253030823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25973691300329343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stronglikebull53,2020/04/01,"I've given up on life but I'm not suicidal Title says it.   


I used to have passion, drive, energy. I would set goals and I was committed. No matter what, I was not a quitter. If I fell off the horse, I would get back on. Then, something changed, not entirely sure what. I suppose stress from the Military, issues w/ my body (injuries from PT), and finances played a huge role.   


These days, I live with various amounts of depression. Some days I feel good, some days I feel horrible. Usually for no explainable reason other than that's just how I woke up. But consistently, I have very little goals or ambitions for the future, I don't plan for the future. I don't exercise like I used to and I used to love being in the gym. It's like I've gotten tired of fighting so I just quit.  I'm not suicidal, suicide thoughts to me are like thinking about playing a Nickleback song. The thought is there, but I don't do it. So I just go through life depressed, often with little desire to do anything.   


Idk what to do about it. I'm considering I go see a mental health professional but I'm afraid I'm going to be super vulnerable then end up feeling worse. I don't like to talk about my feelings.",1.4708568646543334,3.852500611814349,3.3000210970464146,87.63858081791626,82.96624472573839,6.684128529698151,24.305258033106128,7.882392219407189,1.494915092502434,923,36,188,18,26,308,133,237,0.191,0.614,0.195,0.4655,0,0,1,0,2,1,37.0,0,0,0,5,12,16,1,2,10,0,17,8,1,5,2,40,42,14,3,4,13,0,4,4,0,2,5,2,0,0,10,5,0,0,9,5,1,5,10,5,0,0,7,7,24,11,29,31,4,26,0,2,1,2,6,10,0,5,14,119,34,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028657348733476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09370858952649012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13536732587903813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12891966207971545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357833781775701,0.0,0.20992860833928464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10793843794494888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464794905613104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367074188366345,0.0,0.2077803359483901,0.10221668189874206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295394598818233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127198013881132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17215724679094546,0.2381532302697181,0.24428651310430216,0.10761124033587313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099901820078238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281378230115166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962109338401004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530009296480912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691393201411666,0.0,0.0,0.09711262388186896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381955987096946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395988161443275,0.0,0.0,0.3999098143393999,0.0,0.1148586819719588,0.0,0.0,0.0979524849013872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808777692117097,0.0,0.19349837374229095,0.0,0.14006877048051922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31576318993881264,0.13421984032500198,0.1005534552810725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12419339984049205,0.17314235913873335,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,malao312,2020/04/01,"Mental Health Project So im doing a project in college on Mental Health.

I just wanted to know if there's anything you use to help with your Mental Health? Like stress balls or other things? And why it helps.",1.0564227642276445,3.6755761463414665,1.1774390243902455,98.79184959349595,92.41463414634147,2.7333333333333334,16.589430894308947,3.1291,-1.0990520325203257,166,4,33,0,6,49,34,41,0.064,0.7509999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.6553,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,8,4,4,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,5,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,1,19,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15792467967862694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.611970585778251,0.0,0.0,0.2572649916844807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20729455249643652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105468117047591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937569988108262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5801971257641813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198310058513732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12749575116967032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16574767984498648,0.0,0.0,0.11319284619363774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.173167940051157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sarah_tranxx,2020/04/01,"My friend is stuck in her own mind? What should she do? What can I do to help her? Dear psychologists who always give out the advice that patients of mental health illness should visit psychological doctor to have suitable psychotherapy. you also say that mental disorder patient should call close relation such as parents, close friends for help. But I am just wondering that, exactly, in my close friend’s case, does it help when the major factor leading to her current situation comes from her family? I know as the only one who understand her the most right now, I should help her get out of stuck but how could I help more rather than just listening to what she says. Still being a student in college, I have no financial security yet, live on my parents and do not work part-time, therefore I cannot take her to psycho doctor. Let me brief a little bit about her situation:

What are they like?
We are in Southeast Asia, you know, “men-preferred” tradition in a normal striking-traditional family and parents always care much for their image among surrounding people, living up to the majority ignoring their own personality, rather than living for themselves. Any language oppose to her parents or just share her opinion that is different from her parents thought, or her decision could make her parents lose face with others, she would be considered as undutifulness, ungratefulness toward her parents “who bearing and rearing her”. 
Growing up in a men-preferred family, her elder brother is very unthoughtful, and very patriarchal. He does not care for what he says that hurts her. When it is the case, her parents say that he is just a oblivious one, he did not hurt her deliberately, he just tells the truth, he is just a little bit rudely but he is kind, he will forget it later and never mind it. And she, the patient, is considered as vindictive or overthinking to pin the hurt and fasten on him. She was slapped on face by her elder brother for switching the TV channel to what she liked from the channel her brother was watching

What they made her?
A unselfconfident girl, disorientation, suspicious about her abilities, do not know what to do to prove herself, do not know what to live for, what she was born for,...
Her brain is overwhelming with many bad memories. She usually comes to me and releases her emotion, I do not know what to do rather than just listen to her. I live quite far from her, so we just can inbox each other, and sometimes set a date to hangout eating with each other. 
In our country, mental health is not cared for enough. And my friend cannot truth others, she always suspicious about everything, she said she just a critical-thinking one, she just thinks about more than a single side. Also, she does not believe that psycho doctors could do anything to help her. She thinks that what they do is just to relieve her mind, but truth still is the truth, no-one could manipulate it. And even she could visit a doctor, she could not stop thinking that her ability is bad in relation with others, she is not preferable, she does not deserve welcome because she is negative, no one wants to communicate with a pessimistic person.

So, what should we do?
As the one who overcame this mental illness do you have any advice?
[If you don’t know much about or don’t understand a psycho patient, please don’t judge my friend! Thank you]
Finally, I’m sorry if any mistake or spelling relating to my English skill vexes you when reading this.
Thanks all",8.187412823397075,8.217514850393702,7.708391451068617,72.11165354330713,61.91338582677165,10.595725534308214,35.623172103487065,10.158995162802928,3.604958155230596,2770,111,473,53,35,873,263,635,0.1,0.7609999999999999,0.139,0.9788,10,0,0,0,0,0,87.0,4,6,5,5,33,32,1,1,26,0,60,12,3,6,8,118,92,35,0,21,36,11,0,2,5,7,8,7,0,3,38,28,1,4,16,5,0,7,20,10,0,5,9,8,83,22,71,67,16,49,0,5,1,0,117,26,0,11,17,360,121,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148713663152653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08305381470187076,0.1296250938273804,0.0,0.0,0.1059387286801402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042732426993625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08671564017181728,0.031654906488575864,0.0,0.0,0.05850522096428262,0.0,0.0,0.11338413888906874,0.0,0.0,0.05796896751292134,0.05302442734661327,0.0,0.15883257019800506,0.0,0.0,0.08946297311542611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24876232154864575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05425384423086122,0.059514136611939016,0.21260256857427234,0.1817706284140236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05313544156696085,0.0,0.05841215768989815,0.0,0.053655640266125036,0.0,0.03429804057426872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04666965551814346,0.0,0.1468596603851337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056884728942904826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20059772478540355,0.0,0.027130305030485472,0.04981419469949782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039434930724228,0.0,0.0,0.20883798841721726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667704137173938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054075157196626665,0.1712300555326526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053100031868072224,0.0,0.05073892332696925,0.10409125791973683,0.2292674538295436,0.0,0.0,0.058094295539662034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049135652827674514,0.03466243046349985,0.05264697407632474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093253684316058,0.0,0.15729782684971216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763463019675297,0.0,0.04005017565512595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0508785426891943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17593922632750789,0.03949368336022766,0.0,0.0,0.4612803508021449,0.05623310517687239,0.0,0.036000427458388065,0.09068328151265292,0.0,0.05700149377162252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0552319589477806,0.051942183178717516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044346339877983296,0.04939554370758428,0.16518133506601024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673878919581172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0513582490503575,0.05812929088774084,0.0,0.0,0.08293974449319047,0.04341424244383825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03904349174258168,0.0,0.045387475047259734,0.09561689194822663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309379751816244,0.0,0.04122513533863964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811803078242893,0.0,0.0,0.05719149960297022,0.08569229234455443,0.03062855689188948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05631384262654941,0.03780429760269726,0.0,0.0,0.03688825415066314,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RulaFrancia232,2020/04/01,"Feeling of powerless, and wanting to be in charge of any situation, feeling I can get away with anything? What's wrong with me? What's wrong with me?",2.568160919540229,5.0633538620689675,3.642068965517243,86.16816091954023,79.34482758620689,6.625287356321839,30.356321839080447,7.793537801064563,2.165749425287356,118,6,23,2,3,38,21,29,0.293,0.619,0.08800000000000001,-0.8377,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,6,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,8,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822295954239526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640733035923152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014960517801256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245132976275043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765697108512745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607049714834107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892750955594696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7017074051746811,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ADeniRemp,2020/04/01,"Weird Grief Dream The other night I had a very upsetting dream. As a little background info, my father died for reasons related to drugs/mental health 4 years ago. In my dream, I was at my grandparents house -where my dad was living at the time of his death- and I was chatting with my grandma in the kitchen. Out of nowhere, my dad walked into the kitchen like nothing ever happened. I don’t remember the details because it was a dream, but I remember feeling really angry with him and asking him over and over “Where were you? Why did you leave me?”. It was like I made up this scenario in my head that he had faked his death and he had finally decided to come back. Overall, it was very upsetting. And the worst part was waking up the next morning and knowing it wasn’t real. It brought me back to the first few weeks after he died when it hadn’t fully become a part of my reality yet.",3.5351461038961034,5.164616897727279,4.398084415584417,85.92159090909092,73.20454545454545,7.301298701298702,27.34415584415585,7.957251820313856,1.6784201298701291,698,26,138,10,14,225,104,176,0.193,0.7390000000000001,0.068,-0.9822,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,1,7,8,0,2,12,0,15,5,2,2,1,22,22,9,5,0,1,3,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,9,11,2,0,7,5,0,3,3,6,0,1,16,1,22,2,22,6,4,31,0,1,0,0,14,14,0,0,16,99,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344436029422117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178812769848606,0.0,0.0,0.23324505032087545,0.0,0.09245476694257372,0.16750423393049854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13064765066296333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148127045738432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719144225686972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668736861467876,0.0,0.0,0.1661437337970274,0.0,0.12900783290391624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411858581769756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556540498895135,0.1612148789740011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17500330078579132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335219103947711,0.0,0.0,0.16059340444846093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819362466937136,0.15201013143415495,0.13392469833374873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351093826144612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16129952534113598,0.1423291613671989,0.0,0.14552853206570282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32848106093513685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263019685140166,0.09716173386750586,0.1559388879742214,0.0,0.0,0.343618184516373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843822007814446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502822404593087,0.0,0.0,0.12165808143905354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368558349680563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766854525767066
mentalhealth,merleau_I,2020/04/01,"Research recruitment: Social Media Narrative and Mood Hi!

We are a research group from University College London and the Anna Freud Centre and are conducting a small study on how one’s digital social media narrative may relate to our mood.

There is more and more interest in how we present ourselves on social media and our previous studies have looked at this through other platforms.

For this study, we are interested in individuals who suffer from low mood or depression and who use social media.  The study has ethical approval from UCL

There will be very little for you to do.  
All your data will be kept secure and safe. We will also share the findings from the study with you.

If you are interested in participating the research or want to get more information about that, please contact us directly through Reddit account. Thank you very much!",8.659187173750933,9.640885060402688,8.210290827740494,65.68614466815812,60.812080536912745,10.91752423564504,36.68978374347503,10.746095033038511,4.3218808351976135,690,30,103,16,9,219,92,149,0.054000000000000006,0.773,0.17300000000000001,0.9534,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,7,5,0,1,6,13,0,0,7,0,14,0,0,3,1,25,20,13,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,6,12,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,1,1,12,7,19,13,5,11,0,3,1,0,23,10,0,4,1,79,18,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813966568055534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15955049971675836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693097809499059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678241346178837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856632859532092,0.0,0.0,0.15555841621256794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13617575171007554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12552621820832754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20334242950625644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7553322581809858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17054790869593886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22282588265916706,0.15999145342932097,0.0,0.305691618979586,0.10926178874575346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamabrokenindividual,2020/04/01,"I am scared of the world An year ago the world was all too good for me, I thought everyone is good. But in past 1 year, I have been robbed, I have been yelled at my job from unknown people for no reason, my friend was sexually abused, my closest friends were all fake and the list has no end. I can't stay in public anymore, I feel terrified of people I want the world to get back to the way it felt. Why are there bad people out there? Why do I have to be victim of bad people?",1.1834313725490198,2.744488127450982,2.596666666666668,96.63166666666667,79.49019607843138,5.7098039215686285,19.176470588235293,6.42735559955562,-0.2469294117647052,367,8,89,3,9,119,67,102,0.22899999999999998,0.6579999999999999,0.113,-0.9295,1,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,4,9,1,1,6,0,15,0,0,1,2,10,20,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,7,3,12,4,13,12,2,16,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,0,6,57,13,1,0.0,0.20257828976773776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15155967445222704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16956198820321972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314697877794157,0.2855151968784684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15143375438227633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633746433707555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645046969497294,0.0,0.1641635197574044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641908600201575,0.0,0.08932776563494091,0.0,0.0,0.28681267202180666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696670366335234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321568693773805,0.4741321917533982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17579153324218774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17117653934239888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18223738622042865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573563672287348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084591930318597,0.13571258148518572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30855801749915684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22020553748232735
mentalhealth,NewbieOnDaBlock,2020/04/01,Any recommended online therapist/therapy sites? I'm just looking to make the most of the time indoors. Anyone know a good place to find someone professional to talk to?,5.0790000000000015,8.091787566666671,6.0100000000000025,69.78500000000001,73.33333333333334,9.333333333333334,33.33333333333333,9.725611199111238,4.114333333333333,137,7,21,4,3,45,26,30,0.0,0.8320000000000001,0.168,0.6199,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,5,4,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,1,10,0,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22186840772745212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281290095638129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981962935164187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736519264736363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17930430282402826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739767477083722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217781495512942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3408729040615045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764395622952357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622359256652241,0.0,0.0,0.37310744979438815,0.3788137232375391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19024518967473014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Burner089,2020/04/01,"Anyone else exhausted by the discrimination you have faced because of the label of “mentally ill”? Story time: When I was a teenager, I was diagnosed with depression and PTSD. Since then, I’ve gotten a lot better and would even say I feel ok again. Last year, my dr told me I don’t even qualify for a current diagnosis due to my lack of symptoms.

But the issue is that the label of being mentally ill still haunts me. I was a volunteer firefighter, and the dept I worked for fired me when they found out about my history. I required no accommodations and could do my job.My former psychiatrist even wrote a letter advocating for me, saying that the issues weren’t current. But all of that didn’t matter.

Whenever people find out about my label, I am viewed as weaker and as less of a person. It’s awful and frustrating. At times I feel like all the progress I have made is for nothing, because all people see when they find out is the broken kid that I was, not who I am now.

Can anyone else relate?",5.079076923076921,5.957186241025647,6.235384615384612,77.0746153846154,68.64102564102564,9.282051282051283,27.82051282051281,9.466822959209583,2.3848974358974364,787,25,149,16,13,264,114,195,0.171,0.7709999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9708,4,0,0,0,1,0,22.0,0,1,2,4,11,6,1,0,14,2,19,7,1,1,3,29,27,14,0,3,3,0,3,1,0,1,6,2,0,2,6,10,0,1,5,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,11,7,24,3,21,13,6,19,0,1,2,0,11,4,0,1,16,110,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19813748368566492,0.2903439874235435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17273849347700573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530797750068046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312313904550515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203221509161015,0.1438062699192248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367175904099759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28074282229283604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327936742778688,0.10121907252106778,0.0,0.0,0.2589932045674711,0.0,0.0,0.1553491846682616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29576255493640946,0.1405995003148721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549136416300723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921964197958595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204546637194082,0.0,0.13406481943841508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855682799319297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359496120008814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19645168138261526,0.1237129972070849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656210051670126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253455951616903,0.0,0.0,0.1129037980998722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720246268239418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314901939681947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472639179945996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16523415078830214,0.0,0.0,0.1353851265267521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10314763395688836,0.0,0.0,0.10064824312910378,0.0,0.0,0.09123984585013294
mentalhealth,LargeGrade2,2020/04/01,"i think i have trust issues i take things rlly personally a lot and the little negative things ppl say rlly get to me. ive had a few falling outs w a few close friends in the past bc theyve broken my trust or were just horrible to me. i feel like this has caused me to not trust ppl i meet, like im rlly scared to say something wrong or voice my opinion bc in the past ive always been punished for it. i just need some reassurance",0.3380645161290303,2.387549096774197,2.5015161290322574,93.69227419354841,84.91397849462365,5.440430107526883,18.97741935483871,6.742157984588678,0.0247987096774196,338,9,78,4,10,114,59,93,0.19399999999999998,0.613,0.193,-0.0276,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,10,1,1,6,0,7,0,0,1,0,15,12,3,0,1,5,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,1,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,4,13,7,8,9,4,8,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,5,4,47,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18012031470001996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22237423749081453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945369587677148,0.15464615428643028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16724412341596867,0.0,0.11309659886933948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338246603055433,0.2259383561004511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21151253744196213,0.21695972878899064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18403498516738992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16050970299233913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41329006594027423,0.0,0.1890131847369129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3442911381142004,0.21672415366310752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664912037953622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16275844002149478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28762599256592336,0.1387051842302799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366758757868491,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crusty_yogert,2020/04/01,"Little poem *trigger warning*  
  
-Can’t be freed -

We’ll live together in a sweet home 

Sitting remembering the good times 

While I sit in with my clouded head 

The fog filling in 

Blocking since 

Home I am not 

I’m in a endless hell 

A hell I created 

No where but down 

Can not see up

I feel no hope 

She left me along time ago 

Falling deeper and deeper 

Can not be saved from my demons 

I may tame them for a short while 

Yet I will never be free 

Because they will always come back 

Come back to torment me 

Free I can not be 

Will never be",-0.8513540669856461,1.1648336636363652,1.0424401913875592,97.90050239234449,103.27272727272728,3.406698564593302,17.607655502392344,5.399115186594226,-0.5219090909090904,413,13,90,3,19,134,74,110,0.179,0.6890000000000001,0.131,-0.5791,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,1,0,2,0,4,9,2,0,6,0,15,1,1,1,2,19,21,4,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,0,5,0,1,2,0,2,4,9,2,0,0,0,3,15,9,11,11,0,26,3,0,1,0,4,10,2,2,10,62,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18280703100542373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17159666972705034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171503456672274,0.0,0.1257135414195577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35529111988758505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427413328169856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17297270272101858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21164751688857086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4137232681093407,0.2048290901153002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22406530558429125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20669277081310092,0.18210146072337088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181086267241571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23361401634673665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16433553417256186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17059239490077696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24050424246424001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MightyPips,2020/04/01,"There’s no reason for me to be this sad. I’m on mobile, so formatting may be off.

Tw/ suicide, abuse 

I’m suicidal. I don’t have a set plan, so I guess it’s more ideation. I literally think about dying every night as I fall asleep. It’s been like that for a few months. The thing is, I’ve been this low before, but it always made sense previously. I had a really tormented childhood. It was really, really rough and I experienced a lot of constant physical and sexual trauma through my adolescent years. 

But my life is so good now. I’ve moved away from all my abusers. I have a decent job. I’m engaged to the most wonderful person I have ever met, and even found a family for myself who (I think) truly, honestly love me. 

But I want to die. Remembering all of the good just makes me feel that much more selfish and terrible for feeling this way. I feel like a burden to my fiancé and my best friends. I have so many “triggers” and I feel like it must be annoying to spend time with me. And my fiancé deserves so much happiness and just everything good in the world, but he’s stuck with me, someone who seems to always be on the brink of crying or re-living some trauma that happened years ago.

And that’s another thing, despite being a few years past the terrible things that have happened to me, they still effect me so much. I still get so upset over the things that I experienced- and it feels like I’ll never get over it and it’ll never end. It’s preventing me from enjoying all the life I have now. It’s so exhausting and frustrating and I just want it to end. I feel like I have no escape. 

So I want to die. The only reason I think I haven’t tried anything yet is because I think of my fiancé finding me dead and my baby brother being told what happened and I feel too guilty to ever do that to them. But I want it so bad and I’m afraid one night I’ll get low enough to where that thought won’t stop me.

Am I just a big baby? Is something wrong with me? Why can’t I get over my past and just be grateful? I hate myself for it.

I don’t know what to do. Thanks for listening.",1.0732972415570998,3.2242792273781937,3.0390688321732418,90.3330451147203,82.7122969837587,6.429718999742201,20.48265016756897,7.635375032292933,0.734803516370198,1621,47,351,28,45,544,192,431,0.214,0.611,0.17600000000000002,-0.9739,1,0,1,0,2,4,49.0,0,0,2,3,27,33,3,2,18,0,33,5,1,6,8,74,74,34,6,5,11,1,8,5,1,4,3,1,0,1,32,20,0,2,21,0,1,2,9,17,0,1,10,11,53,16,39,53,15,42,0,3,0,1,12,14,0,8,29,243,85,1,0.0,0.18620753085383326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696559162117443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076874760213295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239737521981405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466416873800827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07382795345436302,0.0,0.06561053493558107,0.04790128617942793,0.0,0.06686530030107966,0.0,0.08246425521054314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491643911118149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631580503825984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244659101202612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919608820757412,0.08119354831945749,0.0,0.0519009669965255,0.14215917154378024,0.06620655196636932,0.0,0.07062211748048301,0.0,0.0740776854804558,0.0,0.2781248169549194,0.2245486185298173,0.0,0.0,0.07182016793590368,0.0,0.0,0.08615828010015346,0.06071026635542615,0.0,0.16421801857092458,0.0,0.0,0.1977260724829028,0.0,0.0,0.08656409223138271,0.0,0.2084625695468176,0.0836492556809698,0.0,0.07758091067627211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797795112950638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04318519519003609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100593896915367,0.1919496814497264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06680541438481627,0.07092099611695668,0.07435374887494556,0.05245237422848969,0.07966720017388408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272134478669117,0.08351748959534569,0.17329474945412449,0.0,0.12121058871457473,0.0,0.0,0.147482928480321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05324744986084624,0.059763191200729635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15002589910366906,0.0,0.06861252016326272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101996923212144,0.16158546598239892,0.0,0.0,0.08901516675282886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153575436700597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658008908845936,0.06049427794228319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125507255504001,0.06569591517561052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190626697862907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234537411210501,0.0,0.0,0.20881870481021345,0.20140208235728574,0.0,0.06238328349996866,0.04582029276861102,0.0,0.0,0.07508600497386284,0.0,0.05335026931122548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18539271559317685,0.062372687451181776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090570592429568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521603096477733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591426213036929,0.0,0.15180771392854225
mentalhealth,Dwight-fromtheoffice,2020/04/01,"I want to cry again I can't remember the last time I had cried I was a child but I would have been really young. I remember even when my parents told us about their divorce when I was 10 years old my brother, my sister, mom and dad were all crying and I just didn't care and went back to playing on the computer like nothing happened. I find it really hard to express my emotions to people and to myself. I just have never really had anyone in my life that I could trust on that level to be that open, and I think that my inability to handle my emotions properly has really effected me in some negative ways. sometimes my mostly genuine happy demeanor feels like a facade. I don't ever really feel sad anymore, just indifferent and it is mentally messing with me a lot. I really wanted to go see a therapist about this and I was making arrangements to see one soon but then the covid lockdowns happened and everything got canceled on me. 

That all being said, I'm not a person who is at any risk to themselves. I'm just really at this tipping point of really wanting to understand how to develop emotions and manage my emotions in a healthy way that is beneficial because Ive recently come to realize how much it's actually held me back in life, and I guess I've been blocking my own emotions for so long that I don't really remember how to have them anymore.",5.956324349442379,6.1336272416356925,7.285090613382902,72.77700394981416,66.54646840148699,10.888568773234198,33.91287174721189,10.686352973137794,3.761180111524164,1084,46,198,28,16,372,151,269,0.125,0.78,0.096,-0.7992,2,1,0,0,1,0,15.0,1,0,2,1,18,9,0,1,9,0,24,2,0,5,4,49,47,19,0,5,7,5,3,2,0,1,2,1,0,2,13,13,0,2,10,1,0,3,7,3,0,1,14,6,36,6,28,29,7,33,0,1,2,0,15,12,0,4,18,149,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.08153174494333174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056816166224016515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571626061346564,0.05841938408743585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284880051556094,0.0,0.050930678079709184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518374557244765,0.0,0.0,0.07197004176019027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670705599108101,0.0,0.2753238689538077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4699067426275715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05518330827744842,0.07557482877238363,0.0,0.0,0.07508842909213169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448974158617832,0.0596874025508793,0.0,0.0,0.0763622471236501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04748280638141509,0.0,0.06682174554355114,0.0,0.09203861245363036,0.0,0.14776416067393855,0.08893943466855019,0.07484346854773756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810356360964301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802622003502387,0.08163561535111577,0.0,0.0,0.07393821140950846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103034856454214,0.0,0.0,0.05576958782152572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419771321512337,0.0,0.0,0.09785154665676636,0.0,0.0,0.061418107955678536,0.0,0.06443811811806095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016749231172328,0.0,0.08767059204635043,0.0,0.056614945938401585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277124645620899,0.0,0.0,0.05792233764066869,0.07295174003435125,0.0,0.0,0.07898078429862462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4817124998120845,0.0,0.08249453078654795,0.0,0.28393409636965,0.0,0.07947420524054001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13315542770474664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826320700099142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700679645135238,0.0,0.05353480793135406,0.0,0.0,0.0487180776686198,0.0,0.0,0.07983462350657325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697742674392768,0.10049912664052874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14783804573896206,0.1326345707563376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745073442297609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059350792830424326,0.0,0.0,0.053802798941904484
mentalhealth,Hitlers_cumsock,2020/04/01,Seasonal affective disorder and quarantine. Does not getting enough sunlight affect your mood? How are you guys handling it now?,6.8663333333333325,10.924314300000002,5.890000000000002,64.70833333333334,81.0,10.666666666666668,41.66666666666666,9.725611199111238,6.687166666666666,106,7,12,4,3,32,20,20,0.139,0.861,0.0,-0.4696,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,5,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5463541222275339,0.0,0.4171745478786315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4925717133611957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24906274096434716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4720205800460221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yardmarshall93,2020/04/01,"Family issues. Living with my parents, I am the only one son. My mother doesn't stop to feed me, she cooks like two or three steaks and she wants me to eat all. I've tell her several times, politely and keeping calm that she should not do that, that is not even healthy for me to wake up from bed to work and have to eat 3 bacon and 2 fried eggs. Yesterday I just could not resist no more and I had a very big argument with her, I shouted at her and obviously she shouted at me, I am feeling bad about it now because she also goes through depressive problems all life but I dont know how to make her understand. I've never been bossy with her ordering her food or requesting her to have food at the table at certaing hour, I've just tell her to cook if she wants and leave it on a plate and If I want I'll eat but still she even yesterday approached me while I was eating with the pan in the hand still hot to throw another bacon steak in the plate and that was what it make me go out of my head. I don't know what to do. If you speak nice no listening and if you speak wrong obv no listening.",4.830749336870029,4.185222353448278,5.662241379310345,86.25305039787801,69.0,9.552254641909816,28.190981432360743,9.057496981413335,1.827497612732096,854,24,198,14,13,281,128,232,0.064,0.8420000000000001,0.094,0.6988,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,1,10,7,0,0,7,0,16,14,3,3,4,47,29,21,0,10,13,3,3,1,0,1,1,6,1,0,9,15,10,2,4,2,0,3,10,4,0,3,4,9,35,3,28,23,3,24,0,1,0,0,27,10,0,6,11,136,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030827346299558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516479184995436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762763102676401,0.07857734980653287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029176101871581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102294410360776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15107196679624738,0.0,0.0,0.5275949471704806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027686579049628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151715891411607,0.0,0.06517663056920575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117371719489093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325787182705483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229045003778736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694232216814882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345400047847806,0.0,0.11457385556965735,0.0,0.0,0.14168213255067935,0.0,0.0,0.13648840979510285,0.0,0.0,0.09104716378918322,0.06297491557128722,0.0,0.1138226639545993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17208592447796467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941702602728182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734720563345642,0.09803563860360884,0.0,0.0,0.14313021070264992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334162807999224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14562236014742144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205882311428022,0.10776768891502676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22533173521842004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516368474179237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259183427777183,0.13419133505023065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635749680245966,0.2280888900902487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384205630142928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409338990084882,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notavo_,2020/04/01,"Im about to have a mental or psychotic break I feel desperate and trapped right now. Well, I actually am.

Im living in one of those countries with declared confinement. This is really important. I cant leave the house unless for buying food. I CAN NOT look for another place to live.

One of my housemates is a f*****g b***h. The kind of person that is all the time telling the other what to do and how to do it. I think sharing a house is about everyone finding the shared things and places clean and well preserved. For example, if someone goes to the kitchen and needs to use a pan, it should be clean and people must so their best not to scratch it, etc.

She is constantly complaining about everything. Yesterday I was really tired and watching outside through the kitchen window standing of the window frame. She was bossy telling me not to do that because my hoodie was gonna get dirty. That day I had used the microwave and used one of this plastic covers to avoid splashes. I was gonna wash after lunch it afterwards, but I left it inside (small kirchen) face up so no grease felt into the microwave to avoid it to get dirty. She complained because I didnt rise it and leave it upside down. This was in a time lapse of 15 minutes. Now remember that we are in confinement.

She does not only complain about how things are left, but how we did it. Ive been living with her for a year and a half, but until a couple weeks ago I was writting my phd thesis, so I had other things in mind. I defended my thesis and the next day the confinement was declared. I never realized how unbearable is to live with her. When I moved here, I remember her telling me that she was looking for a housemate to see films with, to play board games, etc. None of the previous ones wanted to. There is another room in the house, and the three guys who lived here did the same than I do: stay all the possible time in the room to avoid contact with her.

Ive been meditating for the last 20 days and Ive realized that my jaw was tense. This is also important.

Last 4 nights have been a disaster. The first one I couldnt sleep until 8 am and slept for 3 hours. The next two I got up after 3 hours and couldnt sleep more. Today Ive only been able to sleep for 4 hours.

I think I cant sleep because I have so much confined anger. I wish I could get the fuck out of here, but Im literally confined. There might be a small chance of going back to my parents house (disobeying law), but it will be the same (overprotective parents). Also, my mum takes care of my grandma, and I dont want to take the risk just in case I have the disease.

My head has been hurting for the last days. I feel Im gonna break down. Im scared that all that contained rage could escape in a violent way making me break all the fucking stuff of the house.

Im glad Im virtually seeing my therapist tomorrow (i started seeing her for something totally unrealated about low selfsteem, etc). She once told me that tense jaw is a symptom of repressed rage. She will probably tell me how to deal with my rage, but still the problem is here: I cant leave the house. Id love to move somewhere else, but I just can't.

My head hurts because the lack of sleep. But I cant sleep. Im desperate. I have no fucking clue what to do. Im pretty scared of ending up having a psycotic break or something like that.

I dont know what to do.",2.999191029235085,4.5778548649045545,3.984577226004543,88.54851181417702,74.50660792951544,7.360950473902013,26.03820584701642,8.061468544071445,1.4520681938325986,2637,93,558,41,55,851,284,681,0.146,0.769,0.085,-0.9942,2,4,2,0,0,0,85.0,2,0,1,2,31,33,8,7,45,0,70,23,12,9,7,97,107,42,0,13,18,3,4,1,0,8,3,0,8,2,35,26,4,10,11,3,1,4,18,22,2,9,23,11,69,11,80,69,15,73,0,3,6,4,35,25,3,4,38,379,104,1,0.048604320753573065,0.0,0.047430805797928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0430847977311403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777377154927499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193173639783384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037373722493825486,0.0,0.1185149712095324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051007235982581764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04955534431643882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05252400373332665,0.0,0.07761319030430602,0.05377975644487292,0.0,0.12538306380368908,0.050108920488371414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04253396863018937,0.0,0.11392780387419058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0406026732193926,0.0,0.04304900166095392,0.0,0.16261999683655826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04644351137244575,0.04368242946861732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04915160993888309,0.0,0.046667770098762516,0.0,0.04442346862725231,0.04134281040346048,0.058772537584670485,0.0,0.0,0.1348017340112637,0.07618125457314709,0.0,0.027622955571266882,0.0,0.03887331539583285,0.0,0.0,0.048125919106460587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976411088008567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435963960422843,0.3364971624516189,0.10406386125034453,0.0,0.4725090626145795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05061392063045605,0.02671166357336361,0.1188570256393122,0.0,0.15439487330441196,0.1056174734261606,0.0,0.0,0.023745616021123843,0.0,0.2145925284892036,0.0,0.08163077624403374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438672971194782,0.0,0.032443761521746016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048981723461356826,0.051561503442422725,0.04907650842675193,0.0,0.0,0.103317401935814,0.035729768238699035,0.03603948797566239,0.037486648526484964,0.0,0.10338249305084354,0.0456118624802433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05176201532912826,0.1646777281616454,0.07393155225533488,0.0,0.0,0.10793869252656164,0.0,0.0,0.03369611615581234,0.04243941812597304,0.10156234057029197,0.0,0.0,0.054794068716264535,0.0,0.04944806777511042,0.052403678433830106,0.0465077708042713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062274344919002786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011844113544872,0.04150782435405466,0.0,0.0,0.09732280833327517,0.0,0.11619405245392865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918365332764504,0.0,0.04118228324751999,0.07483596141673335,0.0,0.0,0.03440238839444502,0.051805738912653686,0.03881547333856408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055640318780982585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050518499524994924,0.07308880064867096,0.0,0.16992927464311586,0.0,0.0,0.056433362572593126,0.0968716529965385,0.062287372364869385,0.0,0.0,0.08502471089100619,0.05586351672180948,0.046071212920331936,0.04644351137244575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04747935889221288,0.0,0.0,0.1259355827909697,0.0,0.0,0.05733617534997047,0.038579847469276514,0.03898745434108336,0.0,0.08740224300345008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05589257017023632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031299589010049166
mentalhealth,Tight_Explanation763,2020/04/01,"I am not strong this is stupid to put this here, but I will anyway. i am 18 F. my sister struggles with mental illness and lately has had rebouts of manic/psychotic episodes due to medicine instability. i am weak, ... When this first happened, we were 16. I didnt know what to do then. I acted like everything is normal, still do. Dont talk to her anymore or any less.. i feel frozen, hazy, overpowered. I have no idea. We are close though, its hard to place context in here. but its wrong... All I want to do is run away when it happens, and in the wake afterwards... When will I stop feeling like I want to run away and do the right thing? its hard. I have so many problems and flaws and struggles besides this. im scared i will kill her (hurt her) because of my own fear, my own desire to run
 
i dont know what to do. i just needed to vent my emotion",0.4606896551724162,2.6957353563218405,1.9087471264367828,96.8734655172414,86.24137931034483,4.629425287356322,20.19425287356321,5.985473137389443,-0.13610712643678147,648,20,147,5,20,208,103,174,0.233,0.6920000000000001,0.075,-0.9858,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,2,0,0,2,10,13,2,4,2,0,23,3,1,0,1,27,32,14,1,6,5,1,4,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,11,9,0,1,5,0,0,5,5,10,0,1,3,4,24,3,17,26,4,22,0,1,0,0,7,7,0,1,12,103,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648691607045157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071215986552876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666119486664733,0.0,0.0,0.08649200373556444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33257719046650136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596019423699882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275174204311596,0.0,0.0,0.15966048609900835,0.14348301103416874,0.10136293564199624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068762200626433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509375256498807,0.0,0.2542028421880567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15189122157552554,0.16017131074627874,0.15326054568524194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697513823405904,0.0,0.15595297586401002,0.0,0.16005287581579505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13863604833325094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438494939202869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298707970333815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10520620295668112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13901753606260134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14824001137320986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135765135664557,0.0,0.1426339843942773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12116932949302495,0.0,0.0,0.14205200602099474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330983860465245,0.1186225213138544,0.0,0.29665878764905396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404208471807115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942623342557417,0.0,0.1394016542087898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673753329875931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15512937697087334,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sinkingsoul391739,2020/04/01,"Fear of Relapsing Hi all:

It's been two years since I last cut.  I've been having a really hard time, with passive suicidal ideation. I've been fantasizing about disappearing one day. Today I was in the shower;I accidentally cut myself with a razor blade because I was shaving myself too hard. I remembered the feeling, what it was like, how calming it felt...now I'm really scared of a relapse. Anyone got pointers???",4.316883116883115,6.785166402597407,5.710389610389612,73.71415584415587,73.28571428571428,8.555844155844158,30.48051948051948,9.23628265651192,3.1654987012987017,331,15,55,8,7,111,55,77,0.258,0.639,0.10300000000000001,-0.9173,1,0,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,2,2,5,0,7,0,0,1,1,6,10,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,2,7,3,6,2,6,3,1,7,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,33,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16546322833867144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14425270906542648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15261233614636024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662842419618332,0.11965159871786298,0.16905468059089604,0.2272101893654271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892615253237344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4239634538918681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19289206266457576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560967882845838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160352456184179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031935246040338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680654315608107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23691654501791776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19574991550248147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588442471471845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798588491516886,0.0,0.22430574655207505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311615511522977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523875156448045
mentalhealth,whsupbro,2020/04/01,"I could be terminated TL;DR: Depression relapse has caused me to be ineffective at work. I might get fired within 30 days. Trying to figure out how to move forward without making myself anxious.

I saw on my supervisors desk a 30-Day Performance Improvement Plan with my name on it. She’s back to work tomorrow, and I know we’ll be having a conversation about it.

I started this job July of last year. I was doing really well, everyone was impressed with my performance at work.

But it has slowly... strained my mental and emotional well-being. It also did not help that my s.o got shipped out to Navy bootcamp before Thanksgiving, the same day I had to start a course for my masters degree.

She only noticed my poor work efforts and results last week, as I was out sick with bronchitis.

But I’ve known for awhile, and just could not figure out how to ask for help at work about it. Largely because of shame; particularly because 3 of my uncles work for the same company.

But, for awhile now, I have been ineffective at work. And I cannot focus. My turnaround is slow. I can barely find the motivation to work (I am underpaid, but even then money has never been a motivator for me), and when I do... I can’t hold on to that steam.

I’m trying to be careful now with how I speak to myself; being careful not to call myself lazy. I am seeing the edges of relapse (I have been diagnosed with MDD, GAD, Panic Disorder and PMDD). And I am trying to take ownership of my actions without blaming myself.

I cannot sleep right now because I am trying to mentally prepare for (re: dreading) tomorrow.

I’m just not sure how to approach the situation and move forward.",4.008600292112952,5.935452863924053,5.431012658227846,77.77226387536516,72.57594936708861,8.15267770204479,28.92599805258033,8.841846274778883,2.5238002921129508,1299,53,232,26,26,436,165,316,0.10400000000000001,0.841,0.055,-0.9322,1,0,0,0,0,0,52.0,1,0,0,17,16,12,0,4,9,0,34,3,1,9,2,53,48,21,0,2,12,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,8,18,0,1,7,0,3,6,10,7,1,0,10,4,39,5,49,29,2,37,0,1,2,0,10,15,0,1,20,173,47,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842168158939299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11078431709026823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167652777172028,0.0,0.0,0.07540510154287887,0.0,0.17933656675253398,0.0,0.08344517337840449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013422677242408,0.0,0.19996540461233092,0.10073865904036247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565921215616094,0.0,0.0,0.18972934779449147,0.0,0.08446231081145539,0.09953281481808224,0.0,0.0,0.11238974845893478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030871123138007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06477029445812553,0.0,0.0,0.0937042782298632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962864652506226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051234350888302166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843067532851199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131460357281301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731330933077924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05389336597288286,0.15987036683144729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06545842824151055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19765073345097064,0.1040303224657838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208452855757239,0.0,0.0,0.07563294074088568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116464231607746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458203027484345,0.0,0.11505688135405626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06282225837832264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374605207598904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814424805569913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022795507114744,0.09813474083414307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882029496148035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242408429089052,0.0,0.07373186381783056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663158590428345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866096169503684,0.0,0.17634248260497346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890602393916039,0.0,0.5711336149847139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063149949485044
mentalhealth,health_for,2020/04/01,"How to lower stress and anxiety levels during the coronavirus pandemic Remaining indoors can take a toll on our mental health especially those diagnosed with mental disorders here is a list of activities you can do in the comfort of your own home to cope better with the chaos around the world due to the coronavirus

 [https://wordofhealth.com/2020/03/31/5-ways-to-relieve-stress-during-a-pandemic/](https://wordofhealth.com/2020/03/31/5-ways-to-relieve-stress-during-a-pandemic/)",41.857894736842105,27.1084940877193,28.37684210526316,-6.862105263157872,20.40350877192984,29.817543859649124,78.05263157894737,21.19438992294339,12.543294736842105,421,12,39,10,1,105,45,57,0.16,0.7559999999999999,0.083,-0.6124,1,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,2,0,1,3,3,0,1,7,0,4,2,0,1,0,5,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,10,5,1,6,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,29,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15924739799612356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18531301156804306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18410704097800115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21128540542255936,0.0,0.0,0.23857773551252445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22127208231915224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20880875289409434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195673097920649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7153647413473156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15651588642182265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,littlecutechicken,2020/04/01,"Should I get my brother (8M) to see a Psychiatrist? Hello Reddit!

First of all English is not my first language, sorry if you find some mistakes. 

I (24F) have a little brother. He lives in another country with my mom and my stepfather (his dad).
Me and my mom videochat daily, so even though I'm not living with them, I get to have an idea of their daily life.

A several months ago (not sure if more than 1 year) my brother started to develop a particular obsession with expiring dates. Every single thing he eats, he has to inspect the package, check the expiring date and always brings it to my mom for her to double check that the product is still good to eat. But it's not once or twice a day, we are talking about: he'll do that in the morning if he eats a cookie and 1 or 2 hours later if he wants another cookie from the same exact pack he'll do it over, ask moms, check again.. I feel that this is too obsessive for a 8 year old. As it has been going for several months.

He have another obsession, now about his personal hygiene. Everything he poops he'll spend a ridiculous amount of time cleaning his anus, with toilet paper, then wet wipes, sometimes even shower after to make sure it's really clean. This, again have been going for even more time then the expiring date. This is serious to the point he already got micro fissures on his anus from too much cleaning.


My mom is the kind of person that doesn't give much credit to mental illness, but I brought it up to her and she seems to be worried too. My daughter is only 3 months old so I don't have experience with toddlers or preschoolers as a mother. I don't have much experience with mental issues on kids.

Please tell me if you think that's a normal behavior for a child of if I should talk mom into taking him do see a doctor.",4.5525791433892,5.340915240223467,5.521354748603353,82.04542132216018,69.78212290502793,8.424767225325885,28.324487895716945,8.59863814320734,2.007893482309125,1408,48,278,22,24,464,186,358,0.051,0.9179999999999999,0.03,-0.4566,1,0,0,0,0,0,43.0,1,2,2,2,15,11,1,3,21,0,26,9,3,1,4,45,48,23,0,11,15,12,2,0,0,5,3,0,4,4,15,13,3,0,5,0,5,4,7,6,0,3,4,4,32,5,43,38,11,39,0,0,2,0,46,9,0,11,26,185,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144439816748799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894081933140065,0.0,0.06706317983924034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535390187933997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534733694296683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05197841237267675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08249446848752759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24741262756955956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597007211895189,0.0,0.0679064682115869,0.0,0.07243540757354994,0.15767870819492902,0.0,0.0,0.04075227662620018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366421911486425,0.13711157361163367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421723626024842,0.07731600878441272,0.09161029134738334,0.06760095920457422,0.06446080217345189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937183286999835,0.0,0.0,0.09098422894901494,0.0,0.08412235251188575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392939711369121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056928061060597515,0.0,0.08077939089702954,0.14233729627626504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05379913886738123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16244568563327205,0.0,0.0,0.5663655572089601,0.19299532505977415,0.0,0.17774425710946376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896797041939373,0.0,0.0,0.16914603605037368,0.08583319936194071,0.0,0.061297668024711816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074842386445974,0.0,0.08847132869972586,0.07619023823404232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05163251690046828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284507852013963,0.07337250295684554,0.0,0.182103390490141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971251685755999,0.09022176895601927,0.05704698788892858,0.0,0.06436488688109925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15192348117833215,0.0,0.06059893106279648,0.1295616686592297,0.07044535078054012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05354508095883975,0.05164331813522638,0.07918616613243026,0.0,0.09399354480559033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04753821251136445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185018938582021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380368099518524
mentalhealth,Veggies51,2020/04/01,"Workout/fitness pal? Improve physical and emotional well being I would like to have someone keep me in check for physical activity. Could be running, HIIT, or whatever. Let me know if you're on the same boat",2.311929824561407,5.213185105263161,4.269473684210528,75.73298245614036,92.68421052631581,7.796491228070176,32.64912280701754,8.344100000000001,3.9057754385964913,166,10,26,5,6,56,36,38,0.0,0.773,0.22699999999999998,0.7964,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,8,8,3,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,4,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,1,19,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31784154510154344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4477963625027916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3538396511177924,0.0,0.0,0.2187792149530921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4070728091494084,0.0,0.19448609845698447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372993813778314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579296747451945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28279088944872466,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unimoest,2020/04/01,How do I achieve the maximum clarity of thought? How do I get there? Is it possible to get there quickly? One of the goal is improved problem solving.,1.3598275862068974,4.0431028275862095,3.106465517241382,85.70383620689658,89.6896551724138,7.037931034482759,38.28448275862068,8.07648339933343,3.883406896551723,118,9,22,3,4,39,21,29,0.078,0.6679999999999999,0.254,0.7219,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,0,4,7,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,18,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4999779063813906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3242341946791409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5394205683349169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4578460542716264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3798640825037142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xxxinpainalways,2020/04/01,"Very Hopeless, Need Some support In 2018 near the end of the year, I ODed on 87% thc dabs and thought I was stuck in a time loop and possibly even died, I somehow managed to call an ambulance on myself where they told me I was fine. Ever since then I haven’t felt real and my anxiety/ocd I had before went up 10 fold. Have felt like I’ve been in a dream/disconnected for almost what seems like past a year and a half. Never was able to get help or anything because my parents wanted me to keep going and work and I never had time. Fast forward to today, I’ve gotten so in my head about everything that I don’t even feel like I know what’s real anymore. I have these fucked up ruminations where I’m scared I’ll become some mental fuck up I saw a while ago at work, and maybe even a killer or some kind of fuck up that’ll be locked up for the rest of my life. I’ve been trying to hang in there and have been taking natural supplements to combat whatever this fucked up shit is. I wanna buy a WRX, I want a girlfriend, I want to be happy...I want a normal life, but I’m scared I’m gonna turn out a killer or go crazy before any of that happens, I’ve felt so alone through all of this, I don’t even see or hear things that aren’t there but I have delusional/paranoid thoughts. Mostly if becoming things I don’t want to become. Society and the medical system has failed me. I don’t know what to do anymore. It feels like this is some kind of sick fucked up experiment. I just want my old life back and to feel happy for once. I don’t think I’ll ever get better and even while typing this to you all right now I don’t feel like myself anymore since after I’m pretty sure I had an ego death after that trip. I’ve lost hope long ago and even before this virus shit I’ve isolated myself for a while just to keep everyone else safe and because I just can’t even look at people anymore without fucked up thoughts I don’t wanna even commit. I’m just hoping there’s hope out there...I feel like I’m in a scary movie where the guy has gone crazy. I don’t wanna be crazy...I wanna just live my life...",2.8623648648648654,3.732176351351352,4.066295045045045,90.6221452702703,73.77477477477478,6.9914414414414425,22.208333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.4906657657657649,1636,37,371,16,32,536,197,444,0.182,0.685,0.132,-0.9855,2,1,0,0,0,1,42.0,0,1,1,5,27,30,8,2,19,0,33,15,3,0,8,78,91,26,2,16,13,1,8,6,1,2,6,1,0,1,17,15,0,3,15,0,1,7,14,13,0,1,22,12,39,17,52,64,8,57,0,3,3,6,9,26,8,16,31,220,56,5,0.06365109911181953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128457177501408,0.0,0.06373738137826998,0.06592334251273455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04328493008523021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25249914703352777,0.0,0.0,0.05237943114390075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04894376626911809,0.0,0.07760223846084538,0.21089291446837413,0.16248719165756612,0.0,0.0,0.05629422461270043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499488881268177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06605979166552148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0531723257772796,0.0,0.05637598116593012,0.0,0.0,0.3363276052443515,0.11515212648167357,0.0,0.0608213529092708,0.05720550363513985,0.062262988619690526,0.0,0.0,0.16091954106237308,0.18188943169429933,0.18334511091787487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3530664928123829,0.06651014436738352,0.0,0.07234877293080337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06302459533224815,0.056286456733599055,0.06775777859191051,0.0,0.0,0.06532439103126518,0.0,0.07173941471999673,0.0,0.042663990027067236,0.0,0.0,0.18965971026697176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315204296385925,0.0,0.13256564965986453,0.0699619589036128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983461475725218,0.18658027130898475,0.0,0.05620508665793105,0.05632921973068139,0.05345089231497786,0.0,0.06948269368932469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394608434702632,0.0,0.0,0.06412178591990393,0.06414533700642991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719648347126585,0.09818330320165336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06236456272161284,0.0,0.0,0.06679112125050297,0.06778634320693927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706770129639485,0.0,0.06076217637422054,0.04412765770333955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175705049519515,0.0,0.06475605077991231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14489777157651684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054357690857796966,0.0,0.0,0.12745170846990014,0.0,0.05072168505653739,0.05794557006330425,0.0,0.0,0.13067387709482087,0.10530569387521252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223051297244229,0.05999040763307365,0.0,0.04785770505506527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457392388728019,0.04078505419211784,0.0,0.15159558839406,0.07423093552136363,0.0,0.06033379943033587,0.0608213529092708,0.0,0.04321491812904682,0.06923411796043304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052518822849615086,0.22525840439558126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900520656973074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061357388149025326,0.0,0.09267751646867252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197844188950629
mentalhealth,rubber_duck_boi,2020/04/01,"Therapy? So I’ve been thinking I might need therapy for some time cause I’ve got really bad anxiety and depression

Also I’ve had suicidal thoughts but have never wanted 
to act on them

Does it seem like I’d need therapy? 

I know if you have suicidal thoughts you should go hut I’m not planning on acting on it so like I’m not sure",0.040869565217391816,2.4080056231884086,2.663318840579709,88.25758695652176,94.21739130434784,7.397681159420292,22.84202898550725,8.238735603445708,1.9833176811594209,264,11,55,8,10,91,46,69,0.233,0.684,0.084,-0.8895,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,2,1,1,3,5,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,2,19,18,6,2,5,4,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,5,0,5,3,5,11,1,8,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,4,4,28,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936469920136807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13331707089811348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455092598934793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902463490413362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009961915536188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525059929125293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904239839930457,0.0,0.1393806821504915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577495133407024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17028031313545602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18487431414919125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584399281230712,0.13440877347233654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164266009860413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15865005039335275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3812490433688863,0.0,0.16424864202228526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5978832735794429,0.0,0.0,0.11166601512084848,0.0,0.2767038988698392,0.10161899907399502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278973057486833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,booboocancan,2020/04/01,Shout out to my boyfriend for being there for me while im being a mess. Working front lines really isnt good for anxiety / ptsd. Thank you for helping me help myself. hes the b e s t,0.17275000000000065,1.9669427750000041,2.765000000000004,93.05,83.75,6.0,20.0,7.1686216300943375,0.36375,141,4,33,2,4,49,34,40,0.129,0.648,0.222,0.4086,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,2,6,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,19,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810846039412932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3081846710533197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4925640761209706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3968897947084215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4295085435103352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353864564032559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33828217558252965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674949954728585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sushi-bad,2020/04/01,"Coronavirus I just need a place to rant my thoughts and feelings, I couldn’t think of anywhere else where people would give insight and not hostility

This situation were all in has made me realise something about myself, selfishness. Everyone I’ve talked to says this isn’t the time for it but is that really true. I can’t help but think about all the things that I am gonna miss out on or is going to be significantly worse for me:

My 2 month summer holiday that everyone at my age will have got in their lifetime, a ever looming recession that’s going to haunt my coming years where prosperity is supposed to happen, time spent with my girlfriend and friends.

I understand it’s not just me in this position, everyone is. But it still doesn’t fix the issue. My biggest fear is that the government isn’t being truthful and will extended my country’s lockdown further and further.

I have gone through so much progress in the last year with my mental health. As someone that’s suffered with depression and self harming you can understand stand why isolation scares me. The thing that hurts the most is it seems my government has disregarded mental health like it seems it normally does. 

I don’t really know what I’m looking for here, It just seems like people shrug off my thoughts. Maybe this social isolation is getting to me",7.759363166953528,7.8733253293172725,7.3167096959265665,74.28370481927712,62.77510040160642,10.969707401032704,36.661216293746406,10.608840637214634,3.903671026965004,1073,47,191,24,14,337,144,249,0.19,0.6970000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.9704,0,3,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,1,1,11,14,1,2,9,0,25,2,0,1,5,44,51,12,0,4,9,0,1,2,2,4,2,1,0,1,21,11,0,1,12,1,1,4,8,9,0,0,7,3,25,5,25,37,4,29,0,4,1,0,10,14,0,5,12,130,46,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101611243960752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101597924116056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322672623928132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985396182858514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670067955873354,0.0,0.3381446727238813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13273668296270036,0.059643620696374626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911348399961762,0.0,0.061628715147338,0.113157032771277,0.13407764967650526,0.0,0.09434259758988804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431076467153376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507698273088683,0.0,0.0,0.07906543921791312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262775619421907,0.0,0.0,0.12311856172668155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648271880542625,0.09615233849098344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525762976445444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905586127298302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11161566920433033,0.0,0.0,0.11850568223824673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.237749879510886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415375791658354,0.0,0.08671344629598778,0.08746511268236219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155747866078424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355585287539998,0.0,0.12324206115613888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15113512709279156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09380574080351556,0.11809754904373608,0.0,0.0,0.3221563626525003,0.1230569753327786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259087168223188,0.0,0.12024435771952115,0.09994628800480593,0.09081061032869997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420221928983537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481098556997343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673345212878173,0.15116674371901706,0.0,0.1872925586233276,0.13756569689871204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455989829046976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643966090339928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120210310662533,0.08379469765560345,0.0,0.0,0.15192347247132384
mentalhealth,puglover5555,2020/04/01,How to cope with an injury So I've recently pulled a hamstring and the first couple of days were fine but as the weeks are progressing i have no energy mentally and physically I'm so done with this damn leg my doctor doesn't want me using crutches but it's getting to the point where I can't go a day without crying because I feel so helpless and stuck and it hurts like crazy and the feeling that I can't even do my regular things because of the pain and it doesn't help that I'm stubborn as hell,3.1202142857142867,4.4003580095238135,4.363035714285719,87.15883928571432,73.66666666666667,7.5357142857142865,26.458333333333336,8.07648339933343,1.507404761904762,401,14,85,6,8,132,71,105,0.332,0.5720000000000001,0.096,-0.9868,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,2,6,8,3,0,8,0,9,3,1,2,0,17,18,14,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,8,0,1,2,0,0,2,6,6,0,1,3,2,7,2,9,15,0,9,1,2,0,0,1,2,2,0,6,56,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767121738325504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511330536921896,0.24931098884043296,0.2927479945598095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23230884813149816,0.0,0.2322645487603594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149908598986512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295211937319188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19305677286733172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185801272929864,0.0,0.12898974713146494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15213021761887227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429713053980444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11088389865245514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22872788203431166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24150733743177905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21455579758891144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22410108999055647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15078582005212315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19602535455399894,0.0,0.0,0.13387015630526952,0.0,0.18205806629855986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21878668182968555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bonkowo,2020/04/01,"easily irritated sorry for the lack of punctuation and proper grammar

does anyone else get really annoyed whenever someone does anything? like they could be talking about any random think nd in my mind im like god stfu no one cares, obviously i dont say that bc i hate being rude but its really annoying when im just tryna talk to someone and all i can think about is your so annoying stop. i always feel really bad when i think this so i overthink it when i get home or when im in my next lesson (used to). i know i can also be really annoying so i try not to ramble on about things but i guess i am now. i wouldnt be surprised if they thought the same about me lmao",1.0606714628297382,3.2989965539568367,3.644143884892088,85.44084412470025,83.46043165467627,7.15990407673861,20.77745803357314,8.238735603445708,1.2735952997601925,527,16,109,12,15,184,91,139,0.23199999999999998,0.675,0.09300000000000001,-0.9637,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,2,1,14,11,6,0,2,0,11,0,0,1,2,26,23,14,0,4,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,5,2,0,1,7,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,1,2,19,4,12,16,3,10,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,4,9,71,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197062839492873,0.11650440752343072,0.0,0.0,0.0952155825252577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979023411174952,0.14346278941973886,0.11522111827113535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11690739018503142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275549540573287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179126676186968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24505763594746555,0.0,0.16409753889200715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169652801364696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079622312791585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630501024975212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542432494483316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13823666891675354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404473184310812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4537234496614238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07694905199683659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680934823755628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137609918534133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14890844988899762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487836676460283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3587909672551978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134622746014483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372699585900652,0.0,0.0,0.15673628603853493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11705952400081293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22507888055821693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302031230636053,0.26914951824435057,0.0,0.11115694868689732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506157444025888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209287431289948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway234235232,2020/04/01,"dealing with some issues. So, i'd like to start out by saying that i'm thirteen. Pretty young, I know. I've suffered no real life trauma, besides seeing a few gory images on the internet when I was about ten years old. I was generally safe online, but my curiosity got the best of me and I looked up something I shouldn't have.

But that's not relevant. My problem is the fact that I have issues with existential thoughts. How the universe is pointless, we're all going to die, and nothing that ever happens will truly matter. It's been messing with my mental state significantly, causing minor self harm (about a year ago, I don't harm myself anymore), stress issues, depression, and more recently, disturbing nightmares. I know it sounds edgy, but i'm here for genuine help. Not to be called a ""depressed emo kid"", so please keep those comments to yourself.

I've considered asking my parents if I could go to therapy, but I really don't want to make them worried. They're the kind of parents who won't leave you alone when something like that emerges, and i'm extremely introverted and alone time is critical for my health.

Should I go to therapy? Any advice? Worldviews that might change my thoughts? I'm an INFP if that helps.",4.1844827586206925,6.38449331034483,4.802965517241383,81.28858620689657,72.79310344827586,7.398620689655173,29.272413793103446,8.238735603445708,2.2386148275862063,976,41,174,16,20,312,149,232,0.17800000000000002,0.6709999999999999,0.151,-0.8976,2,2,2,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,1,1,9,15,0,2,9,0,17,2,0,3,3,39,37,16,1,7,8,2,0,2,0,5,2,2,0,2,11,9,0,2,4,0,0,3,7,10,0,1,6,4,21,5,20,24,5,18,0,3,2,0,14,3,0,4,13,105,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231188844084758,0.10188179669140024,0.0,0.0,0.23807331684384034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07815886211135194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398335389111275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074475012815646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061583481478565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736016536587708,0.0,0.0,0.1180685771967183,0.12158462250613647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176521292380432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184916053564743,0.19798446712021375,0.0,0.11928304233652705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396411820220476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959584232765233,0.0,0.09192298500722476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163549766432636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12216915616519015,0.0,0.0,0.15407528241721574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35988278867125023,0.0,0.10215835980578103,0.0,0.1196857695283954,0.12632911935448404,0.0,0.0,0.12169820076177698,0.0,0.0,0.08118107635835295,0.11230160758200068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651536721785274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671914200200004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582614411759172,0.1219265004701883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028199179613524,0.0,0.12060359173046095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552405606207233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616269651362694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692889959200573,0.0,0.10997603561281943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308197209351103,0.07362947585039127,0.0,0.1134831701115555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139989703227554,0.0,0.0,0.0915872840867092,0.0,0.11990092267463565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769631658443278,0.0,0.0,0.08135066948609927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165617322760728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628734214113128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18248905052559447,0.06701876891549631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779087831072847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11672075863260008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14802707831869014
mentalhealth,justhere4thespooks,2020/04/01,"strange attraction (not as bad as you think, but still bad) so, any time i spend any normal amount of time with a friend, i find myself attracted to them? it’s really odd, because the moment they leave these feelings completely disappear. and it happens with EVERYONE. like EVERYONE. close friends, acquaintances, random chicks that walk by once and put their hands on my shoulder, everyone. 
i wonder if this is some kind of mental illness or im just touch starved, but it’s happened so much that i consider it to be a problem.
i’m a girl (bi) and most people this has happened with have been girls, too. 

has anyone else experienced this or know anyone who has? i just wonder if this is one occurrence or if there are others like me.",4.047391304347826,6.253591057971017,4.45731884057971,83.58858695652177,73.20289855072464,8.078260869565218,27.44202898550725,8.841846274778883,2.262655072463768,578,22,107,12,12,182,96,138,0.15,0.7170000000000001,0.132,-0.2117,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,3,0,7,10,0,0,4,0,9,4,2,0,0,29,18,15,0,5,11,0,3,2,2,0,1,0,0,3,13,7,0,0,6,0,1,3,1,3,0,1,1,4,12,7,11,16,4,9,0,0,0,1,10,2,0,11,6,72,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19793441869109904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035196599511289,0.14911542351834553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24302740899399924,0.08871536773093174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525882405810738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157387539330712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.417188122115411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358569311190295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301422815797678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248763669764479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38608219090833856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15720026224249406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15154988556159535,0.07998095202423791,0.0,0.0,0.15409808928139684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14219982746902565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466627064790466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698326113189656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259112172436084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15498754891646596,0.09861670681335638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008940323862355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13925511510110244,0.0,0.14630053449973654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323195801017672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162225820328738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325146161615754,0.0,0.0,0.1697225459575259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3156479554762958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Urgreat8,2020/04/01,"Nightmare problems Hey! Uh I don’t post things much but I feel that it’s important for me to put this out there. Since mid-December I have been having horrible night terrors every single night. I was not usually effected much by nightmare before, but these leave me crying when I wake up 8/10 times. I have not been able to set up a doctors appointment, as my healthcare provider has been booked since December. Does anybody have any ideas as to what I can do? I don’t watch scary movies, read scary books, etc. I’ve tried home remedies (no blue light before bed, tea, warm milk, music, etc) and nothing has worked. Does anybody know what this is and maybe how I can stop it? Literally anything helps, I’m terrified to go to bed!",3.2656153846153866,5.559194814285713,3.5285714285714285,88.94565934065935,75.85714285714286,6.87912087912088,25.76923076923077,7.882392219407189,1.4756868131868135,574,21,113,9,13,177,97,140,0.225,0.7240000000000001,0.051,-0.9832,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,1,0,16,4,1,2,0,14,20,8,0,1,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,9,3,2,1,4,3,0,2,5,2,1,0,4,5,12,1,12,16,5,13,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,0,6,65,21,5,0.1608520405016739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938490339263753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13236752385079933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737464783086806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668841346115044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463887933801707,0.2815254092115749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35878508895203803,0.0,0.0,0.1355247816142808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133162474069237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141592145382928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781573213277787,0.0,0.16134771169691206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18158237474872824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08840007481544555,0.0,0.0,0.17031908569010915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16159749466763454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364895152834389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3018974871895325,0.0,0.15434187106487846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540517911898056,0.0,0.0,0.1539136792175266,0.0,0.16170072833588048,0.0,0.0,0.16089556934824198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661169402042138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13447950833699315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686294832555483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379411835437043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920797689539308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17715579760748226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710220122377492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jaleke87,2020/04/01,"Am I being self-centered? I took a leave of absence from work due to Covid-19 because I work in a health department. We don’t do the actual testing in my facility, but my co-workers answer questions and order the tests. We also have a home heath department on the end of the building that takes care of sick and elderly patients. Once Covid-19 patients start requiring home care, they will be taking care of them. 

The extra stress of the pandemic along with the anxiety of who could be carrying the disease has my anxiety in overdrive. My employer allowed me to take time off because of this. I can’t draw unemployment because it’s a medical issue. In order to utilize my sick time, which I have 180 hours of, I have to file for FMLA. 

When I spoke to my doctor about FMLA paperwork, at first they kind of made me mad because they insinuated that if the time comes and they end up quarantining, they will have to use time. I pointed out that they then can draw unemployment. Once I explained that if I don’t use FMLA, I won’t be paid all, they agreed to fill out my paperwork. 

Now I’ve been at home over a week and I feel like I’m faking it. I’ve been following the shelter in place order instituted by my governor. I don’t let me kids go anywhere except out back and to their grandparents. I go to the grocery store once a week. 

I am taking triple the amount of my Klonopin prescription. I have a knot in my stomach. I forced myself to stop watching the news. Yet I can’t shake the feeling that I’m being self-centered and there are people out there getting sick and dying of Covid-19, and I should be at work doing my part and making it easier on my co-workers. 

Is anyone else struggling with Covid-19 induced guilt?",4.5770808678501,5.774292127218933,5.438002958579882,81.15875986193295,70.03550295857988,8.473570019723866,30.651380670611445,8.841846274778883,2.4678398422090733,1361,56,262,24,24,445,170,338,0.152,0.779,0.069,-0.9822,7,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,2,0,9,5,8,11,1,4,21,0,32,7,1,6,1,40,57,15,1,4,4,0,2,1,0,4,6,1,3,1,11,19,0,2,6,0,2,9,6,6,0,1,6,4,46,5,47,39,5,50,0,0,1,0,16,20,0,3,19,182,57,10,0.0,0.0,0.0938140648342802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687926610793798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708629414824276,0.0,0.0,0.06721995083223918,0.09850184930181836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392201684432079,0.0,0.2344124457900233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29404865928657026,0.0,0.0,0.08281194237298799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675611603800299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977313567125676,0.0,0.0,0.09839842699172524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030860437154093,0.0,0.1702944643225181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721766779929056,0.06867898947324004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177253222611343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050226662014628436,0.0,0.10927167275705353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10218719739327001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892942619664289,0.0,0.09467378413425093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034014781566172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001099928972774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179327134611832,0.0,0.09830473157625014,0.0,0.04696679138082343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09096542868466116,0.06417097697720263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684607663407101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071424771526005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410502810706078,0.0,0.0666480270053289,0.0,0.10044079836609948,0.0,0.09087881565644663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107693399519872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20057991128990504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680449729030651,0.0,0.0,0.08037331240461845,0.11012252015116564,0.10050135991548853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891267549586405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22422877862761606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680971863231163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16605985259494238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422767999601275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3499377681632219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sensitive-Lychee,2020/04/01,"How to get help for a parent who is in denial with their rapidly surfacing mental illness? What can be done when you have a family member who has become very mentally ill quite quickly (delusions, paranoia, violent outbursts, beliefs based in their own reality, making plans and decisions that make no sense to anyone except them, etc.) but will not allow treatment, and can talk their way out of wellness check situation?

My mother is living with my father who's mental health is deteriorating severely. He is emotionally and mentally abusive to her every chance he gets (some examples include: asking for her round the clock care but saying to get the eff away from him anytime she goes near him, threatening to kill or release their pet cat that she loves, bringing up nonsensical stories from over 20 years ago as evidence that she hates him and is plotting to turn the family against him, etc.). I'd chalk this up to just him being an abusive ahole, but combined with some other things I won't get into, lead us to believe this is a mental health issue that's been surfacing for the past few months. 

We've spoken to our family doctor and unless my father allows himself to be evaluated they say there's nothing they can do to begin assessing him and prescribing anything to stabilize him. He's threatened suicide once and when we acted on that asking for a wellness check, thinking this would be the thing that finally forces him to get evaluated and hopefully on the way to something to stabilize his moods, they spoke to him and released him 3 hours later, deeming him not a danger to himself or others.

He is a danger. He is a danger to my mother every day. If she tries to leave he threatens her with nonsensical empty threats, but she won't call the police because she thinks once again they'll just allow him to return home the same day...angrier and more irrational than ever. So in the end that will just hurt her situation more. 

What can be done? We can't get anything prescribed to him without his consent (and he doesn't think he has a problem) we can't have him forcefully committed for evaluation, doctors are deeming him not a danger after spending less than 10 minutes with him even though we see the danger everyday, and we can't leave out of fear he'll hurt us or do something else irrational. This is absolutely killing my mother - the fear she faces every day is giving her daily health problems, but all we're told is there's nothing they can do because after evaluating him ""he's not a danger to himself or others"".",10.671012658227845,8.231665911392408,10.058485232067516,65.16051265822786,58.66244725738396,12.602362869198313,41.21054852320675,10.899274998029325,4.523631561181435,2038,83,340,37,20,659,238,474,0.187,0.7190000000000001,0.095,-0.9946,1,0,2,0,0,1,47.0,8,1,10,3,16,23,11,2,22,0,42,9,1,7,3,67,67,29,3,5,20,6,1,0,0,7,7,3,2,0,21,25,0,0,5,0,3,3,12,17,2,0,5,5,59,5,58,50,11,41,1,2,2,1,83,15,0,8,21,255,80,4,0.0,0.17494840683735152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544413919330934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051622310759153085,0.0,0.12150844005397893,0.0,0.13803857918099605,0.0,0.06936391228473808,0.0,0.0,0.09000982574790899,0.08153731498499114,0.0,0.08317896541944435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538672508120943,0.0,0.07527264886921774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14283901362245713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15113233834567127,0.0,0.15110351866186975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06167388818608376,0.08304665403331057,0.06538976634898337,0.0,0.1646756515681658,0.04876275115042252,0.06678172591855222,0.1866100270316568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087956324469573,0.16615423289920853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08087505394646725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314327507961133,0.07082262249443677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288994522170407,0.0,0.2354273929450261,0.0,0.0,0.04948540640337883,0.0,0.07405558472435125,0.0733279426432285,0.0727057881598346,0.0,0.1580689751210892,0.0,0.0,0.07705733533020052,0.0,0.0,0.1633596659686563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563465554961362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.065191548034778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663272546006234,0.0,0.0985616345808703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3720067050258358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058928869819670625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416800695708752,0.0,0.0,0.15724899335791895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197734688384667,0.0,0.07047725704802722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14128700545739822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07852525172360818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742210636022835,0.0,0.0,0.0588314219297008,0.0,0.0,0.08340471709812555,0.0,0.0,0.16597171243151612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367292719311095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075593773077637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05934021487573107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809619287917742,0.14191815959550455,0.0725357146463243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054589514035398,0.0,0.0501244207339233,0.08030375176062761,0.0,0.0,0.17761218224060768,0.0,0.0,0.06091589865109748,0.0,0.1172025884207001,0.0,0.0,0.13276062226447516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07116763543395889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052445350445815664,0.0,0.0,0.04754286355594362
mentalhealth,temporaryaryary,2020/04/01,"Too scared to see a doctar Hello

I am certain I have a mental disorder, some psychotic disorder. Not to selfdiagnose, but I fit all the symptoms of an early schizophrenia prodrome or have schizoaffective disorder. I know I need meds but am too scared to go to see a docter.

* When I am going to sleep I hear voices, even in the day now sometimes.
   * i.e.. it's getting worse ever since a drug problem
* I see colors that aren't really there and shapes
* I am always very paranoid
* My social skills are bad
* My speaking is very bad
* I can get very irritable and unimportant things can make me very agitated

​

So I know I have *something* and I need something like medicine. I think if I don't get medicine for it I will have a breakdown and my life will crumble down.

​

I am scared to go to a doctor because my family/friends/parents will not be receptive to learning that I have an illness, and am also paranoid that the doctor will send me to a hospital.

​

What should I do

​

Thank you",1.5783578792341686,4.3272177268041245,2.86575110456554,86.85713917525776,90.8041237113402,5.451840942562592,25.485272459499264,7.021680442328713,1.5428385861561118,805,36,145,13,28,259,108,194,0.266,0.68,0.054000000000000006,-0.993,1,0,3,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,0,1,9,9,0,3,12,0,24,7,1,1,3,24,41,12,0,5,6,0,0,1,0,5,6,3,0,0,7,5,0,0,4,0,0,4,4,6,0,0,0,7,26,3,13,35,2,13,0,0,4,0,6,4,0,3,6,104,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06761796792470334,0.07035587282068607,0.3664577871467573,0.4109704604416948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411984602213818,0.051543459124359606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545304678227236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29071933624755186,0.17308962525282878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805603468213048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05584725555968563,0.07648412007323653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252824823932835,0.0,0.1441623113283509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529873528303766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09293756057895057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05972313620542183,0.04130891401403276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05644058902499512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392066139457712,0.0,0.08521075220471609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253917446127342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090695576939004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05416758944579178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539605321757313,0.0,0.20213626454211409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994411289511937,0.0,0.08461526995513545,0.08619236477202262,0.0,0.1301879173221382,0.08362627169918005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788419517689153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784615259423336,0.0,0.0,0.05617405728663615,0.05417892100359696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2790643004633894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616795949920159,0.0,0.0,0.4109704604416948,0.0
mentalhealth,lexleighton,2020/04/01,"I am writing a fictional story about a group of teens in the psych ward and need help. I know the topic is so basic but I am looking to Reddit for help. I started this story years ago and now have found myself picking it up again due to my state's stay at home order. I want to add realistic aspects to the story. Basically any details you could provide about a typical day at an adolescent psych ward would be appreciated. Activities that were held, the amount of therapy received, list of rules to follow, visitation, etc. Anything you might think that will be helpful so that this story, which is fiction, doesn't seem totally wrong about what happens in an adolesecent psych ward. (Edit): Also are there phrases therapists love to hear? ",5.669562043795622,7.318607963503653,6.2040948905109525,74.9835145985402,67.9051094890511,8.691678832116787,31.94817518248175,9.120678840339163,2.9492166423357657,589,25,100,11,10,191,99,137,0.0,0.831,0.16899999999999998,0.9763,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,2,0,0,9,2,0,0,9,0,14,1,0,1,1,17,27,6,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,8,3,0,1,4,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,3,2,9,1,18,18,3,18,0,0,1,1,11,5,0,2,7,69,17,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17851273836686307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16104488355256835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694647087346865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571999140099591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16078691167437267,0.0,0.0,0.12987454533322734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22459384343759575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22080465450922326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17808118420107594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269718271252111,0.0,0.40494575290406026,0.0,0.2020022783316662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067412316918224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16910992008444395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18175485892767596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136341739668116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14932198888391662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833303486293162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14253901334238045,0.21464611193317545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302975400116831,0.2338196909023069,0.0,0.12903727059269432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878015226015745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14305579136793775,0.2201792903138191,0.0,0.12968322095435705
mentalhealth,ProxiC3,2020/04/01,"Disordered or Normal? Do you think that things we consider disordered now will eventually be considered normal, just due to the sheer number of people with the issue?

Like it seems like EVERYONE these days has a diagnosed anxiety disorder of some kind.  At what point do we consider it just a divergent but normal way of being?  When 30% of people have it?  50%?  80%?",3.83701298701299,6.718682787878791,5.429567099567101,72.92863636363641,77.18181818181819,10.438095238095238,26.095238095238088,10.290406445055957,3.759487445887447,288,11,47,11,7,97,50,66,0.046,0.84,0.113,0.5588,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,2,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,0,7,1,0,0,0,13,9,3,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,7,6,1,7,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,6,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359551343542144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11461454651586388,0.0,0.0,0.18038182125906987,0.0,0.0,0.6110467453851721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698188521821914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18549326239263333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18506778776860502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736498011413797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5223829108517384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464170171238502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680026227334479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16178940004626505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806911546761033,0.11387564987950485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106567787386373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ksunk8,2020/04/01,"Day 1... again. Extremely scared Day 1 again... extremely anxious

Hi! This is my first post here in this subreddit so bare with me I guess haha. Also I could’ve picked a million different flares like health, sleep, etc so don’t take mine tooo much to heart. Two weeks ago I posted in r/leaves about how I am 19 years old, have been smoking weed for a year and daily for about the past 10 months. I did quit. Throw everything out, and went to a partial program at my local psych hospital to help with my anxiety. This was two weeks ago. Of course, the last day of the partial program was my birthday and my gf came to surprise me. We smoked that night and I thought I’d be able to control it afterwards, felt good about it. Of course I got back into smoking everyday and then right back to morning afternoon and night. All was well and I was back to smoking everyday until last night I woke up in the middle of the night drenched in sweat and puking and shaking. The only time this has ever happened to me is with weed withdrawals but I was smoking last night so idk how I would’ve withdrew. I decided today though that I’m gonna try and quit again. The only issue is that there is so much anxiety for me revolving around going to bed tonight because I’m so scared of that happening again. I literally felt like I was dying.  I don’t really know where I’m going with this but thanks for listening to my ted talk and here goes night 1 again :/",2.209419642857142,4.413319753472223,3.2124007936507937,90.35125000000002,78.89583333333333,6.614285714285713,23.827380952380953,7.7094869923839395,1.1536255952380947,1131,39,234,18,28,361,155,288,0.073,0.8640000000000001,0.063,-0.3867,1,0,1,0,0,0,31.0,1,0,0,4,27,10,0,3,10,1,18,4,3,4,2,34,38,24,1,0,2,0,2,2,1,1,1,1,1,0,11,20,0,1,5,0,0,6,2,3,1,4,15,3,27,7,36,21,4,61,0,0,0,0,6,13,0,1,42,147,38,3,0.09150168579976252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16222144713137698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317386507542155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13999707837138145,0.10337086003435636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145589984572169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21107744495407685,0.0,0.05577857837559294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465355222769404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262692117070156,0.07305665055117258,0.0,0.0,0.17703305278574438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949643036070352,0.09559978651968057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204856704502792,0.0,0.0827685133762603,0.0,0.0,0.08223581513406658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17571193549654146,0.0,0.0,0.07783128719762014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10400503339436357,0.07674727278076245,0.0731822569721455,0.0,0.10079942289971096,0.0,0.16182927712754405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726201319341864,0.0,0.10842993823615868,0.06133165121882391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550398709064907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05028693353973475,0.2237582594823766,0.0,0.09688707346150836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940620350617508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303577262836708,0.0,0.13452853476346274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5152088017733346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601562700654928,0.0,0.0,0.13918231054919267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734871272743287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17526664318807353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19464661202636294,0.0,0.0,0.058618322957900176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814193971627996,0.0,0.0,0.18321830016742294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156776722293987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879788019611953,0.07354558902359358,0.0,0.08424245864522703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989994171883252,0.07264211768752536,0.05335536882690667,0.0,0.08673289912688,0.0,0.0,0.06212363832963619,0.0,0.17876770262281874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14679426610393045,0.0,0.08227100444468471,0.08482297945254205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500017228053184,0.0,0.0,0.11784817130887194
mentalhealth,Tiger_237,2020/04/01,"What is wrong with me Recently I feel like I am going back into my depression which is supposed to be gone thanks to therapy and medication. The wish to cut myself again has returned and the excessive sweating is just tormenting me. My anxiety is killing me, my body physically aching from it. Small apetite, now I take long naps after school, I feel tired all day, and can't even pretend I am okay, sometimes my mood swings terribly; from enthusiastic to fully paranoid and thinking about how everything can possibly go wry. I want to cry but no tears come out. School has me stressed out in such a way that my smoking habits are slowly going up. I need someone to talk to but the more intimate I become with a person the less prone I am to open up, as I don't want them to worry to much, that is why I speak to strangers of my problems and the nerves kill me when I subtly express how I feel. I am just fucking broken.",4.423582660433489,5.658517469613263,5.160441988950278,82.86329791755206,70.43646408839778,8.44215894602635,29.94517637059073,8.841846274778883,2.3192368040798983,726,29,144,13,13,235,118,181,0.244,0.691,0.065,-0.9887,0,0,0,0,0,2,16.0,0,0,1,0,11,13,4,1,7,1,16,5,2,2,1,28,32,11,2,5,4,0,3,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,5,12,0,0,4,2,0,5,3,9,0,0,1,4,27,3,25,30,4,23,0,1,0,1,5,8,1,0,10,102,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139268479427001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145137610735196,0.0,0.0,0.16447542871098006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542156584793544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282852847874237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635865890569834,0.0960439932993938,0.0,0.12826846834070435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836323899148383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13384375324418207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22590213155178665,0.10639170475925132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376783163037638,0.0,0.0,0.2539117050720674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295258262946609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727569965778965,0.0,0.0,0.13179351123550684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15002578330536726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094766555291509,0.11042564239991907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13003514402879662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16789001668905126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14250065015124475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14704499422996056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014391239731328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261832600444773,0.0,0.14729015538323276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17059253115296008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197270296014483,0.11969988566932944,0.0,0.13710968668837478,0.17030816418257813,0.0,0.0,0.09542481723711632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17116682470323175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17567907735122384,0.1182093497932791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438121293883162,0.0,0.17125584499421462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15124007606392764,0.0,0.0,0.16282558086581006,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shelbalici0us,2020/04/01,"During a depressive episode my thoughts are so loud, sometimes I can’t hear what people say to me. But I heard it this time. My car broke down last week and I’ve been dealing with my depression episode since I lost my job. Major stressors right now. So I went to spend some time at my mom’s house. My two sisters live with her. One is 13 (Trae) and the other is 17 (Kenzie). I was missing my apartment really bad the second night I was there and we were talking about it. So Kenzie drove us back to spend a night there, at about 2 in the morning lol. 

I was really quiet that night. I have these thoughts that I call “automatic thoughts.” They’re just crazy irrational things that I say to myself when I’m depressed. Most of the time they are mild suicide ideations. I deal with these often but I can tell when my depression is bad when I don’t tell anyone what’s going on. It’s SO hard to pay attention when there’s so much going on in my head. It’s easier to stay quiet and I don’t want to hurt anyone.

As soon we got there, Trae said to me, “Shelby, I love you. I’m so glad you’re here.”

I ACTUALLY heard that. I recognized it. I am still in shock by how specific her wording was. I didn’t tell them how I was feeling and I don’t think I’ve ever heard her say anything like that before. It came from a 13 year old.

We talked today and she said, “I know it sounds dumb but I always get a feeling when something is off.” 

It may seem so small to make an entire post about this. But I think my little sister might’ve saved my life.",0.7176011029411775,2.8293707343750008,2.240588235294119,95.76205882352942,83.84375,5.264705882352942,18.786764705882355,6.522977012572876,-0.11885294117647095,1185,30,270,12,34,384,170,320,0.156,0.758,0.086,-0.9621,1,0,1,0,0,1,36.0,4,1,2,1,29,16,1,0,9,1,22,3,1,3,1,39,51,25,1,1,5,3,3,1,0,1,1,13,0,0,21,13,0,0,10,0,3,6,5,12,0,3,21,16,49,4,28,29,4,42,0,8,0,1,32,13,1,5,22,171,70,2,0.0,0.0,0.09713721265153084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282570714941781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920212646048194,0.0,0.0819133868170112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654053454054159,0.1662243938903471,0.0,0.0,0.08470167196286232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164202535563001,0.11384786513997655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052438613821828,0.3429365008871172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004012141121813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006613804357284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052005826178728363,0.0,0.11314237083896032,0.0,0.07961166673326893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916877622271893,0.0,0.10215731622646314,0.0,0.11218942817154574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485642392047628,0.10656021176068338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877863117592116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05470488011222697,0.08113882936364168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030843042772479,0.048630482113509996,0.0997657759471595,0.08789612456550784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866026302624904,0.0,0.08983922784058596,0.0,0.06644408647788709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559678757846556,0.0,0.11658068280626067,0.0,0.0,0.07317375357650023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2802361741893065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044510570552735,0.0,0.06745124916308097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900888031509711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533232619662532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275364435279362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500708122395706,0.18937170497521974,0.2374759090367892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061797333933756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234096713208089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663117435838021,0.09844814387289397,0.0,0.0,0.10609697627249587,0.07949320751414758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888119972856056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600138384711705,0.26100847027117885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06613031480791423,0.12756312344108886,0.0,0.2370722209212273,0.1741286761528178,0.0,0.09435279732801287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723664828550536,0.0,0.11973501907213373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05871159222261034,0.0,0.07984542069991782,0.0,0.0,0.09227508211545007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410084716940401
mentalhealth,keeoth_,2020/04/01,"im getting more suicidal every day tldr: lost a lot of friends, made me extremely depressed, quarantine isnt helping, starting to get suicidal, cant reach out to friends for whatever fuckin reason. 



a while ago i lost a little more than half of my closest friends and its been eating away at me ever since. 

ive also been in the worst depressive slump ive ever been in in my life.

idk how to vent or talk, ive never really communicated with friends or reached out. i have a therapist now but i missed my last appointment. im blaming it on the quarantine, which has made it to where my therapy appointments are online. idk

i miss my old friends way too much and lately ive been seeing them all over my social medias. theyre the people who taught me how to make music and art, and with everything that happened theyre also the ones who made me stop creating. 

creating was one of the only passions i had that stayed around, and im just too depressed to do it lately. i need to have someone with me, and i do have friends who make music but the music we make is so different that its hard to work with them. 

it feels like ive had an open wound that just wont stop bleeding and it wont heal no matter how much i try. 

i dont know why i’m posting this here. 
i dont know if a lot of it even makes sense. 
but every day i get more and more thoughts of killing myself. idk what to do about it. 

thanks ig.",3.624550173010377,4.40961604844291,4.785292387543255,86.49143339100347,71.90657439446365,8.132941176470588,27.252768166089965,8.395991825355821,1.6694829065743946,1094,37,236,17,20,361,151,289,0.165,0.715,0.11900000000000001,-0.8513,1,3,0,0,0,1,26.0,1,0,2,3,18,19,2,0,12,0,27,7,0,11,4,50,52,21,3,2,8,0,2,1,6,2,4,0,0,0,19,17,1,2,5,1,0,0,8,10,0,3,14,3,31,9,31,36,10,32,0,7,1,2,15,14,1,5,16,161,50,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848411516995958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14160855190397706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881811360722074,0.0,0.0,0.08318491690010522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420012786573525,0.0,0.22877446546794464,0.0,0.0,0.09250397882787607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20753312888039616,0.0,0.0,0.09059707807624916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058478901616985476,0.1601764415529564,0.14919515619430893,0.0,0.07957277290037451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04476776982109477,0.06325198416878372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4104281556346672,0.0,0.13877327207200613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829437998826007,0.0,0.07931318310732251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059345548482546175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869106014338545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795482831655088,0.0,0.09731698374704653,0.07217076540737212,0.19975076497438346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253742232117568,0.04325548130022976,0.08873892399035886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19330065305292202,0.15054468081695474,0.0,0.2513320550811551,0.23640077706378734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017209749671033,0.06565024031443675,0.06828641644433164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092906353153107,0.0,0.11999207575366565,0.06733758503533326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613815081053908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08479549191966458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05672008592515964,0.09103241340909933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055379062599353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324003401222882,0.0,0.0,0.09025393941250297,0.0750184573577366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06266806751003501,0.0943703531964558,0.0,0.14804444627975974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936936873384166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07116396236430536,0.0,0.0815144352788074,0.10125159032903212,0.10280012349632682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702897481386696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011188867636499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702778091454216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989230337668618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445714574919298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lynnie-the-poo,2020/04/01,"Is it normal?  I've recently become friends with a guy from another state who informed me he has depression. We used to talk every single day, but here recently he's been sporadically messaging me. It's been 5 days since I've spoken to him, is that normal in people with depression?",5.032222222222224,6.615810925925927,6.7194444444444485,70.93250000000003,69.37037037037037,10.585185185185184,30.16666666666667,10.686352973137794,3.690533333333335,226,9,39,7,4,78,41,54,0.142,0.821,0.037000000000000005,-0.7724,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,8,6,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,6,4,1,6,0,2,0,0,10,1,0,0,4,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372516092409988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24988457287280536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29183583749510444,0.0,0.3897519729915272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190632419472286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17480664101070653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22403134014408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4433702902927969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685905225701596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4468056519348637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18716324634293025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18185789231754848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19541457014098665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TitanGTX,2020/04/01,"I feel like I should be depressed but I know I'm not and I don't know why. Okay so this has been on my mind for a long time, let me explain. 

I grew up in an extremely abusive household, and from my general intuition id bet my mother has had depression from since I was born up until recently, where she seems a lot better than when I was a kid. 
My mother is from a third world country and was forced to marry my dad who is a man with what I believe to be autism (I don't know for sure and no one in my family explains, he can't read or write and can only do simple tasks.)

So yeah her being from a 3rd world country where child abuse is given a blind eye and all the other factors led me and my sister to grow up in an abusive household.

We would get beaten up with bamboo sticks and most of the times we would not know why, reasons being the beating were because we did something which she deemed as ""wrong"" in a more complicated way than we could understand. There was a lot of politics and tension within the family so we would do something like hang out with out uncle whom she disliked and we would get beaten up over severely over it. Again, in our minds we was just hanging out with our uncle. My mum never gave us emotional support and my dad did nothing but bully me relentlessly for most of my life, there was one time I was walking in the corridor minding my own business and he just slammed my head against the wall. I suffered this relentless bullying up until the age of 16 where I finally fought back and he's never bullied me again. There were periods where he would try to show him authority but I could tell he was too scared to go through with it. 

I lived most of my teenage years without maternal love and no father figure so this has strained my social skills and all these factors still effect my life to this day but it doesn't effect my mental health. Even during the abuse. I understand why I never went through depression, from as early as I can recall iv always seen the end of the tunnel, whether it be growing up to get a job, get married or what. There's always been something I look forward to. 

So finally, can someone explain this to me? Is this common? Am I depressed and unaware of it? 

The reason I'm so sure I'm not depressed is because iv experienced something called ""post vacation blues"" and that was by far worse than what I feel in my day to day life. I'm assuming real depression is a much more severe thing. 


TL:DR - Suffered horrendous physical and emotional abuse as a child and teenager but I'm not depressed, why???",4.694275353977208,5.462310772994133,5.419807183147231,82.97427621733627,69.45009784735812,8.360101300794291,30.09790491539081,8.4952907291091,2.1686221480372967,2019,77,400,30,34,656,239,511,0.253,0.7,0.047,-0.9992,1,0,4,0,3,0,43.0,10,0,0,7,23,24,3,3,25,2,49,10,2,5,7,95,79,40,0,8,15,7,2,2,0,6,7,0,0,4,21,34,0,0,18,2,1,10,14,16,0,3,21,8,57,8,65,44,11,68,0,9,5,1,43,30,0,10,30,290,78,4,0.0,0.39904498500203456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209560147508664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05179465139409293,0.0,0.08212242732568077,0.0,0.0,0.07589014294744728,0.0,0.05957326053093959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878072255290993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756081725760816,0.0,0.0,0.13032228890582725,0.0,0.4061114033977981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15153885153810415,0.05965977925429305,0.0,0.0,0.044489759359898094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699949891817336,0.0,0.06811712434220253,0.04812103984333236,0.0,0.1475762381493903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14076847796051298,0.0,0.03828147850470753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06912941767480282,0.07159910527157659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684307599436208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14807423083608867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887879308142733,0.1427322398228475,0.0658160772802489,0.0,0.05947893045286842,0.0596102940507213,0.0565643093123443,0.0,0.0,0.1145318471664592,0.06079382010394715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788168590329678,0.0,0.2040391330584873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04951636515792319,0.0,0.155853452330012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06463245051389231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128794193741624,0.05122929588726231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451097619819711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737688776257914,0.0766689012582381,0.0,0.13851184117812654,0.06650855009903595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06743776902540145,0.0,0.0,0.0613207938424333,0.0,0.15219222482871875,0.0,0.05571977924715989,0.0,0.0,0.06866367073794002,0.057072773651874985,0.20742394788005733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05379271252949926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643780862415367,0.12696947894282146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588744374021436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04475010035686775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178321282074794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04573210829773314,0.0,0.0,0.14024548025011707,0.08102417378887504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05346616866539272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06244215224286854,0.2431228531080585,0.0,0.0,0.06493134410941358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864422869546112,0.23924829565934425,0.07364612008133141,0.0,0.04337676831152447
mentalhealth,marko_esse,2020/04/01,"Weird mental ""attack"" that I haven't experienced before... I think I might be going insane so... like an hour ago I tried to go to sleep, but I have a headache since like 22:00, so I couldn't really fall asleep... I went into the bathroom to wash my face and somehow refresh myself... and that's when the ""attack"" really hit me...

I looked into the mirror after washing my face, and I felt like I'm being watched, then I couldn't stop walking around in circles for like 10 minutes, I was also moving weird... like it wasn't me controlling my body... I started snapping with my fingers... but without my knowledge, I only realised I was doing it after a minute or so...

then, we have a rubber rug in our bathroom that has stars on it, I looked down, and saw myself walking around on it, and it felt like I was walking on a glass plate, and I can see trough it and there is space.. with stars...

I also felt really clumsy or like.. about to faint or something like that...

​

Now I'm sitting in my room, feeling almost calm, writing this... I still have a headache and I feel it in my neck... and I can't help but to roll my head in circles to numb the pain... but anyways, I recorded a 3 minute video of me whispering... I basically tried to describe this ""attack"" as clearly as possible...

this got me curious... what did I experience?... and how can I stop this...",2.8607660878447376,4.5099297940074905,4.125204290091933,87.10310776302352,75.02996254681648,6.3526727953694255,25.619509703779364,6.980632752743323,1.0802674157303365,1033,36,208,10,22,339,137,267,0.036000000000000004,0.831,0.133,0.9737,0,0,1,0,1,0,87.0,2,0,0,1,15,16,3,0,11,0,20,13,8,2,1,43,38,28,0,2,8,0,6,8,0,1,5,1,2,0,16,17,0,3,7,1,0,8,6,7,0,0,11,13,41,9,30,21,0,36,0,0,5,0,4,15,0,6,20,149,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990320610072366,0.0,0.11187033707508963,0.0,0.0,0.17868312232267866,0.0,0.12104737767289506,0.13575068747977515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989070073179143,0.0,0.3812891190679656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950645524287462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240945087796923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530224206582086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092825179442022,0.0,0.0,0.1129768616867205,0.0,0.3218029814830948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698484687821635,0.0,0.08935180723968507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465581870271295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488282138499462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11002060898617598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4366416774905654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876314718596051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258637109856287,0.11851609438668015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873950662905805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496725502807934,0.11887678263483968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259462697215315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21470995745491075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902549620944891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241502564900313,0.0,0.11179957854246823,0.0,0.0,0.08600666461061966,0.0,0.0,0.0790752099506992,0.0,0.08921885505130599,0.18680399981589396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715849578604364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516995945935453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035645363113636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769302951970262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575068747977515,0.0
mentalhealth,immature-throwaway,2020/04/01,"How do I ask my parents to let me get help? I’m a teenage girl (if that helps), and I have an unhealthy relationship with food. I’ve never had a healthy relationship with food. Not once in my life. I’m overweight, and I don’t know what’s wrong with me mentally. I eat when I’m stressed, sad or angry. I eat even when I’m not hungry. When I eat, I feel so shameful but it’s as if I can’t stop. I know that there will be consequences after I eat, but I eat anyway. And after I eat, I feel so guilty that I often break down in tears. I’m constantly thinking about my weight, to the point that headaches are a normal thing now. I cry nearly every day because of my weight, and how much I eat. I know my parents disapprove/are scared of my behaviour and don’t know how to deal with me because they talk about my weight and eating habits all the time, as if I wasn’t in the same room. Spoiler alert, I’m in the same room. I cried so hard after hearing my parents talk that I fell asleep. Then, I woke up and couldn’t control my tears for around an hour and a half. This stress caused me to eat, and that was half an hour ago. I’ve been crying since then. I want to lose weight so so badly. It feels like my life is focused around losing weight, but I feel so hopeless around food that I’m scared. Negative thoughts to do with weight, diets, exercises and food plague my mind every moment that I’m awake. My mental health is starting to get worse. I’m terrified of what my parents reactions will be if I tell them. I need a professional, but I don’t know how to ask my parents.

TL;DR: I’ve had a problem with overeating for my whole life, and I need professional help. But, I don’t know how and I’m reluctant to ask my parents.",1.855784946236561,3.472182822222224,3.1318100358422964,93.29290322580648,77.7222222222222,6.200716845878137,22.446236559139784,6.968188349444268,0.4447607526881723,1336,39,306,14,31,433,153,360,0.24600000000000002,0.711,0.043,-0.9975,6,0,0,0,0,1,49.0,0,0,2,3,24,13,0,5,13,0,22,27,1,7,2,65,55,40,0,10,12,6,11,1,0,2,6,1,2,1,14,21,21,2,12,1,0,1,11,12,0,2,7,12,50,1,38,42,5,35,0,4,0,0,22,14,0,6,20,191,64,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04966378442239154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962540359760007,0.15713060763550582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04677947890274243,0.06830601849062433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575542693138554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06054434361490466,0.06283806955350059,0.0,0.0,0.1846262212947195,0.036132219360894814,0.0577604806294485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5159584675982476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03700473091752264,0.0,0.09440886296613654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331398026983662,0.0400250789506176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709880784193462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05854268177154207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05018840843355028,0.0,0.0,0.05955315701029085,0.06314552112878938,0.0,0.11265940323911065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034890622563942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18474297726302016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057290514504319774,0.11871873896132215,0.02737153745989675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535781859801273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292232447287576,0.0,0.05657042072982205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04118565249724331,0.08308533198581168,0.043210805879952255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054893712590153305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05966600067652946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732623272314537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05296280273612911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05360944056422739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203021943072786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218386129156803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04634539425455856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03965558365850736,0.0,0.0,0.04684035393052708,0.12835548679727668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006336321306498,0.04896930766388044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037221271727773585,0.03589928230219208,0.0,0.044478489578477616,0.03266928734830834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03304566346063253,0.0,0.0,0.4093484018269034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06255117409305078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057095413606711026,0.0,0.0612557787666009,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FgameCorpYT,2020/04/01,"I'm feeling like a monster because of a comment about me in a animal subreddit I'm about to cry hardly because of some guy who started to talk to me like I'm someone in prison for murdering an innocent. Started with me, a fucking idiot saying some shit about not letting my pet rats out of the cage everytime, going about my mom's holy rule: never say something in an animal community. I tried to tell him about my side on the story. I live in a house with my parents and my brother, we take care of all pets we have. My comments got downvoted but that's insignificant when I compare it with how I'm feeling right now. The worst part is: I think I'm the wrong one in this fight, I'll go and cry a bit now.",4.519319727891158,4.587167326530611,5.951428571428576,81.48523809523809,69.61224489795919,8.982312925170069,31.97959183673469,8.841846274778883,2.489538775510204,555,23,116,9,9,189,91,147,0.209,0.725,0.066,-0.9781,1,0,1,0,1,0,12.0,2,0,0,0,9,10,5,0,12,0,3,2,1,1,2,18,19,5,1,0,2,3,3,2,0,0,0,2,2,1,4,8,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,7,0,1,1,5,16,3,24,17,6,17,0,0,0,1,15,9,2,2,8,74,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20532217195624894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838599465654271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17170507359955545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3699806409836843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17030616815415667,0.1203120358126152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569219949282406,0.0,0.0,0.1914224059917691,0.0,0.13469274753653607,0.0,0.0,0.1667522362362006,0.0,0.0,0.1508621532086269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19432236435775035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17221048936020927,0.0,0.1645530992798015,0.0,0.14870898954053033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19723958963791816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988806420431956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411887788991915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18699921673599346,0.18237146419823574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14382109808701554,0.0,0.2678525562429483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17287029855839725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426931257072802,0.12965013602671205,0.0,0.0,0.2384027278086793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266232539375194,0.1353614641668014,0.1471976383767969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10791023656236587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433923849560453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841297416999399,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WeeWackyWill,2020/04/01,"There are more of me?????? Ok so idk how to explain this very well but I’ll do my best shot.  As a young kid I seen this black figure, small like another kid it struck fear in me, I would burst into tears just by looking at it.  I would get random bursts of anger and lash out, I just lost all of me.  I ended up turning into anger, putting my family’s lives in danger literally.  Years later I have learned to control most of it but there’s more of these black figures, they are the same height as me.  They tell me I have powers and all that crap I know I don’t but they keep telling me that.  They keep telling me I deserve to hurt and I deserve to feel pain and that others deserve to suffer. Idk if this is what this subreddit is for but I just hope someday I’ll be normal.",0.5859581378563696,2.6127385521472384,2.048798267773368,97.45140743413931,83.72392638036808,4.816889209671599,19.404186214363044,5.900188976854957,-0.31239920606279314,596,16,139,4,17,192,96,163,0.251,0.664,0.085,-0.9869,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,4,4,8,14,4,1,2,1,11,2,1,2,2,34,22,13,0,5,8,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,13,7,0,3,6,0,0,1,1,9,1,0,2,5,25,5,21,17,7,14,0,3,4,0,10,9,1,4,5,96,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18980477428811374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899588343113956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20301811379707355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16032113907479031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17064012457793346,0.2036865810036134,0.0915240979898128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457025744371143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17978377882300015,0.0,0.0,0.1937749556142259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217800212330235,0.0,0.0,0.09947836570966237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843234596987415,0.0,0.15983515192889214,0.0,0.15200281686059458,0.0,0.19759380445141192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735137423155864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19260740898883735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18196505175474054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4746321718590616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968869086568188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14935221220071335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16274973420247996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25716863026474024,0.0,0.0,0.1165645094904781
mentalhealth,AliMantaRay,2020/04/01,"Quarantine with one addict parent and the other mentally unstable The situation sucks everywhere. I have been in quarantine for over three weeks now and it has been bad. But the real disaster happened yesterday. My alcoholic parent left for ""work"" and came back two hours later unable to walk, yet still capable of driving them home. Upon arriving at home and barely standing, me (F24) and my younger sibling tried to somehow get the drunk parent to back of the house to sit down, since we have stairs in the house and that was a no go. The mentally ustable parent got involved in this procedure, started yelling at the drunk parent...the drunk parent tried to run away but ended up falling and hitting their head on concrete. The paramedics arrived, got the parent to the emergency and fixed up, but did not want to keep the parent in the hospital, because of corona danger and the drunken state.

So we put the drunk parent in the basement for now. We have to observe the injury just in case. My problem is that I can't, I am so traumatised by the events of yesterday, that I have a panic attack just thinking of facing my drunk parent. I cannot fall asleep because these event keep playing in my head. I wanted to leave the house and just go stay with friends or in an empty flat, but my mentally unstavle parent threatened with suicide if I left and my younger sibling blamed me for trying to leave them alone in this. Now they blame me for not wanting to take care of my alcoholic parent jn the basement, but I just can't. 

I feel trapped and it is affecting my health and my psychological state. If anyone knows of ways to cope with all this blame that is being put on me, for not wating to help and wanting to leave, please do share.",7.9883854818523155,7.315702896656536,7.451871982835687,76.10605042016806,62.58662613981762,10.294367959949938,35.76631503665295,9.478462496947786,3.2399303057393163,1379,54,250,21,17,432,166,329,0.22399999999999998,0.7190000000000001,0.057,-0.9957,12,4,2,0,1,1,35.0,3,0,4,1,14,10,3,1,23,0,18,13,4,1,1,51,39,24,1,7,15,11,1,0,1,0,4,1,2,0,11,22,7,2,3,6,0,10,7,6,0,3,7,2,30,4,51,30,1,54,0,0,0,0,22,22,1,4,16,177,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528592262429088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800247638696438,0.0,0.06202511136182224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04187454509835945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06813037206083973,0.05626602588011629,0.09209916965974922,0.05000333727218485,0.07301340161158887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06849503932699315,0.061059024351949515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05304231212598693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03028078393555047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0462687269267829,0.0,0.0312886069928944,0.0,0.06807058815407338,0.0,0.09579458054972274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052958081523088334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292315510472665,0.06365732721820416,0.0,0.0,0.040141149275878106,0.0,0.12014355330947225,0.0,0.058976860207113874,0.20730547552345016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106461047000087,0.0,0.0,0.032912456549435164,0.0,0.0,0.19023579512861935,0.13013530570465734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18105673284376653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04058113833227912,0.0,0.0,0.0702647633882113,0.7979722082137523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573819699498976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05730399312654715,0.0,0.120406418353773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816478105897955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04953933721111227,0.06731575800326968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042388491084398065,0.0638318211178111,0.04782602087633216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06550691177395836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045027745445223116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03837332015856746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12197849838674578,0.0,0.05850112375978159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14129216435613204,0.04753569728178887,0.04803792521007752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0435986181874509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kittnbby,2020/04/01,"i've been feeling rlly sad lately hi. i was okay, or at least i thought i was but the last week or so i feel like any little thing that happened put me off n i'd be sad for the rest of the day. today seems to be harder than usual for me as i've been on the verge of crying since the moment i woke up. today i'm feeling a little too irrelevant, a little too annoying, a little too much like i should die. i don't want to die. i wish my thoughts would go away :(",-0.1836893203883463,1.4208926213592292,2.5182621359223307,95.35331553398059,83.95145631067963,4.8966990291262125,17.09611650485437,5.6839178017228535,-0.6259467961165046,352,7,86,2,10,123,67,103,0.249,0.62,0.13,-0.9519,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,0,8,1,9,0,0,0,0,13,21,5,2,4,3,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,7,3,11,3,13,10,3,20,0,2,0,0,1,10,0,3,10,53,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274314275106708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419495544918158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659600394904259,0.09743747951877202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136052474536567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22917970775860155,0.10793532419181724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586522249726923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360417696747612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123154634021121,0.1704307292364276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762523132096594,0.6057083998360577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110650339959639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518823941794798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754232628037671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249792701179962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003743187046723,0.0,0.0,0.2398896051217541,0.0,0.0,0.2864222793188915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16639904445890666,0.0,0.08911398783641934,0.0,0.12119146457598677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17374056737808616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732661820444486,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amberpher,2020/04/01,"Productivity and motivation during quarantine I am a (surprisingly) very extroverted person and this quarantine is killing me. I am fortunate enough to be working but that drains my energy and once I get home I am unable to do anything else. I moved into my new (and first!!) apartment right as all this started (3/13) and after everything being shut down and unable to visit with anyone I cant find motivation to finish unpacking, clean, or cook. Everything is a mess and it just makes me very anxious and sad to the point I cannot even do anything about it. Does anyone have advice on the best way to stay motivated to do all these things and prevent the mess from getting worse?",5.1678571428571445,7.1903570555555545,6.087492063492067,73.86028571428574,69.71428571428572,9.166984126984126,29.266666666666666,9.642632912329526,2.976243809523808,543,21,93,13,10,179,85,126,0.142,0.69,0.16699999999999998,0.3917,0,2,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,6,3,6,1,0,5,0,13,1,0,4,2,22,17,12,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,11,1,1,4,1,0,2,2,4,0,1,0,0,11,2,15,15,4,16,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,1,5,69,18,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17246426395399367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993837861729536,0.0,0.2468122218566475,0.0,0.2904729333405552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18521566560145986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544478378166256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14743498644185354,0.0,0.0,0.1823616433100332,0.0,0.11657016877285585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172361761331913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130892316791726,0.15012254632512848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844177791681432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17703414606899906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952603512248572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178086357574294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875812421426836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17045541710650866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18795639358563412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410450938029627,0.0,0.0,0.16684036609790773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15072173912795486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12492073216696101,0.18811516111085166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725230314246993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2912459374904275,0.0,0.1400897733463731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12848702952412466,0.0,0.17985867847882975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TaraTalk,2020/04/01,"How Mental Health issues can affect your relationship with the world (disclaimer: everyone is different) Memory loss

Emotional sensitivity

Feeling disconnected

Doubting self

Not taking in information.................

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 [https://www.taratalks.net/post/15-ways-mental-health-issues-affect-how-i-relate-to-the-world](https://www.taratalks.net/post/15-ways-mental-health-issues-affect-how-i-relate-to-the-world) ",41.63844827586207,54.325966551724136,20.60301724137931,-39.737543103448246,4.172413793103445,15.313793103448276,48.6293103448276,11.698219412168324,10.356165517241381,366,12,12,9,4,82,29,29,0.14300000000000002,0.762,0.095,-0.3818,1,0,0,0,0,0,64.0,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,2,0,7,4,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843968428241319,0.20679504722621614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17780851700180658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914367411371099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16262035386582424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605133381536577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5427004062285756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17763033716453047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5145234479602394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3259829654404156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18271645310498905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754148287838298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795895781651834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20679504722621614,0.0
mentalhealth,CompetitiveWeb8,2020/04/02,"I need help with pedophilia  Since I was in my teens I have suffered a lot and until now fantasizing has helped but at 22 It is getting hard to control.

I have a paraphilia that is highly illegal yet everyday holding the urges gets too hard and honestly I'm a good person, I realy do not want to cause any harm.

I want to be castrated, I really don't want to suffer this anymore, it is very disturbing to battle your brain every waking moment to not think of those images and urges. If you are going to insult me please just save it, I need real advice",6.3205405405405415,5.695514522522522,7.464639639639639,74.49533783783784,65.93693693693695,10.643243243243244,30.21171171171171,10.125756701596842,2.8609927927927927,436,13,83,9,6,149,81,111,0.242,0.603,0.154,-0.8689,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,1,4,9,2,1,4,0,11,2,2,2,0,21,21,6,0,6,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,1,2,12,3,12,19,1,9,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,2,5,57,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013536505019488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231692553434904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19296502714533756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172088240043668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19988099512794316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21823117596680047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393690427780452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20331366603132836,0.0,0.11058083242293544,0.1631993574408436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485999958363015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608375700408453,0.2055780102352992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654197733904927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28854816568510605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16989442609815114,0.0,0.2135837148706604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22146769804215485,0.12464902392449705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095354234595324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246750998055619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605438465179683,0.3442941857790676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_BeefJerk,2020/04/02,"Depression Is Anger Turned Inwards I've heard this recently. Do you agree? And if so, has this concept helped you at all?",1.1041304347826078,3.5955688695652204,1.5307608695652206,94.3291847826087,99.43478260869566,5.778260869565218,23.14130434782609,7.1686216300943375,1.3233565217391303,96,4,19,2,4,29,21,23,0.265,0.649,0.085,-0.7399,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,4,1,2,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,12,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.470637635706677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3662591701885763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5395317284297008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.594356753244097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DumbassAsian,2020/04/02,"I don’t know what’s wrong? Kinda? I got out of a super toxic friendship, like boarderline abusive but I don’t wanna say abusive because I don’t think it was bad enough to be. It’s been about 3 months and I was very angry for the first two, ungodly angry.

I moved on since then but ever since I moved on, I’ve noticed whenever I think of my ex-friend I get shaky and a feeling of dread. I was talking to my therapist about the time I went to a school dance and ended up throwing up solely because of that ex-friend and even when talking about it I was shaking and I felt like throwing up. Even now as I type this I’m shaking.

Occasionally I would get nightmares about them, it would be a fine dream and then they would show up and ruin it all. Occasionally those dreams are good dreams but they’re far and few between. 

Honestly I don’t know who to ask because I tried asking my therapist and I couldn’t explain it well and she didn’t answer my question :(.

TLDR - old toxic friend I no longer talk to or see still makes me panic 3 months later",1.9087209302325585,3.8723691162790654,3.3662209302325614,90.07537790697675,78.76744186046511,5.7883720930232565,22.84302325581395,6.742157984588678,0.5796558139534889,820,26,173,8,20,269,118,215,0.203,0.6409999999999999,0.156,-0.9462,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,2,11,16,0,5,6,0,17,0,0,1,2,34,33,18,0,5,4,0,2,2,1,3,0,1,0,0,11,11,0,0,9,5,0,8,7,8,1,2,9,4,27,8,24,18,3,29,0,1,1,0,13,8,0,4,15,114,38,2,0.0,0.28255091620515604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22293959530314103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955728790212458,0.21805593310874594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560792593855,0.1232029196800772,0.0,0.15750883661427334,0.10785601415388232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060289430438687674,0.0,0.1144854983426387,0.0,0.0,0.10142229298525897,0.0,0.0,0.2763648919535349,0.0,0.12459203822704808,0.0,0.0,0.10000970902647603,0.0953641212319357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131058248949355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165056173833939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959112248273699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903464736773749,0.2534585265817537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575126044522998,0.12511838624351249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989804800301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13357188803302075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482145146273592,0.0,0.12067345029972168,0.09501585335008657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19726691562047569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522222294244033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875127424830422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768849518029771,0.0,0.15280354837084156,0.0,0.0,0.06952761600561769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095358659533107,0.0,0.11647649013999327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838239333799574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720770807495388,0.1105331979422971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541060319504771,0.1303661209013129,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,assgaurdian21,2020/04/02,"Feeling too relaxed and unmotivated all the time. I am 23 years old and I've been having a this problem for like 5 years now. I used to get stressed a lot when I was in 12th grade and preparing for college admissions and stuff. The competition that time had driven me nuts and I lost my will to do anything.

Now it's so bad that I don't even feel interested in talking to people. I have minimal friends and I don't go out at all. I feel uninterested in learning anything because I keep forgetting stuff. I don’t feel emotions at all. I see people of my age having girl friends and getting married and I am not even capable of making friends. People have hours of conversations while I have trouble keeping up a conversation for a minute.

Sometimes I manage to get it together and feel better for a day or two but then I relapse back to my apathetic state. It’s like it has become a way of life for me and I feel really helpless.

I am only trying to push through because of my parents as they always wanted to see me in a better place. But I am totally fucked right now…

I don't want to be like this and am searching for something to jerk me back to a normal life.

Is there something that can be done for this?",3.0736122448979586,4.727326432653065,4.696071428571432,83.21267857142857,74.46938775510203,7.348979591836735,28.98469387755102,8.07648339933343,1.9657714285714285,956,41,192,15,20,322,131,245,0.142,0.7609999999999999,0.096,-0.8818,1,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,4,11,18,2,1,10,0,25,3,0,2,4,37,46,19,0,4,4,1,6,3,3,1,2,0,0,1,12,12,0,2,7,1,0,3,5,8,0,1,6,8,28,10,32,37,5,30,0,2,2,1,9,10,1,2,18,140,40,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466995422729664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872543404085818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1749719779250161,0.09499741265517166,0.13871242642262985,0.12565560161432848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124956816930306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337549355584805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643137591049052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798161524614216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150294692271974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3451684968212391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26370695945556805,0.10518319848733937,0.178328299993062,0.0,0.06466098169961405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11204550399715284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022569805394709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16072536219650166,0.16675422429290016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241989049180526,0.09672747713679236,0.0,0.0,0.07594572798742867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114753902655267,0.0,0.0,0.11938777380526112,0.0,0.0,0.08653105086949643,0.0,0.0,0.12633372638444587,0.0,0.0,0.2366318779115848,0.0,0.11887070932801758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108867355236705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288720909632941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716326929693676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18132796542941634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751791809227635,0.1125264316475528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032893302624513,0.0,0.26049041893258945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144807382369707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326862908340642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724578917088726,0.0,0.11114168969059317,0.0,0.0,0.0982651113391056,0.0,0.0,0.1342149421869511,0.09030933727380204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653480124258905
mentalhealth,nerdshame,2020/04/02,"Looking for good online counseling services that aren't incredibly expensive   I've always struggled with my mental health, but have been able to manage. However, I've been without a counselor for some time now and was wondering if any of you had any personal recommendations for services.",9.613809523809524,10.947006163265307,9.082040816326533,59.040340136054446,58.795918367346935,12.247619047619047,42.863945578231295,11.855464076750405,5.925729251700679,238,13,32,7,3,76,42,49,0.036000000000000004,0.922,0.042,0.0644,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,6,1,0,0,0,7,8,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,4,1,2,1,7,4,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,3,2,22,3,3,0.29621492588267023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464745476173464,0.0,0.0,0.40287261448568296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484510260084151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31486261457887343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487459341060098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985149747956236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25864344773843195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096681556882309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17272530537951808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855406180966137,0.3212324514369928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meowsy_meowster,2020/04/02,"I'm 32, live at home w/ parents and haven't had a job/gf/sex in about 10 years, don't AMA, or do, IDK My situation could be worse.  I could be in a hospital on a ventilator, but I'm here at home with all of my basic needs met and I'm not sick, at least not with any kind of coronavirus.  This life isn't what I expected it to be.  I've made many mistakes in my life.  I hope that this post helps some of you, especially the younger folks on here who may be dealing with this current world crisis on top of internal issues.

Some important background information:

\- I do my own chores, I cook, clean, take care of the house, etc.  I do have some disabilities which have hindered me from getting where I want to be, but they're no excuse.

Again, my life could be worse, but it's far from ideal.

My message to Reddit and the rest of the internet is this basically:

I love my parents, but the current situation has made me realize that if this world gets bad enough to see a societal breakdown/world war, these may be the people I spend my last moments on Earth with.

Live your life knowing that this is a possibility.  Don't let fear, embarrassment, low self esteem, or pressure from others keep you from living the life you want to live.  I know this sounds like b/s self-help crap, but it's not.  It's real, hard, brutal life and I'm living it.  If nuclear war breaks out and you have minutes to live (doesn't seem like too far-fetched of a scenario in the times we live in), will you be happy with the people you are with?  I'd like nothing more than to be with a wife/gf/possibly kids in that moment, but I'm here with my parents.  There were times in my life when I had the opportunity to change that.  I still can, but it would have been much easier at 22, than 32.

That is all.",3.0508781033781034,4.150896991758246,4.320525030525033,88.09854904354906,73.58791208791209,7.700284900284902,24.470492470492463,8.167268648758528,1.14481798941799,1371,40,309,21,27,452,182,364,0.122,0.71,0.168,0.9391,6,0,0,0,0,0,59.0,1,7,0,3,10,20,4,3,17,0,39,11,1,2,2,56,61,17,2,13,14,3,1,3,0,4,8,1,4,3,24,15,1,1,5,1,1,0,9,10,0,0,7,3,32,10,46,37,12,35,0,1,1,1,22,22,1,11,14,199,56,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057398170263681415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047449701988692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605633672619564,0.0,0.08928910523428729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021711360707676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870176606381279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721273930614655,0.09413368291700333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497888562218748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819606692546672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985049772863972,0.07561013768316585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314953998445793,0.0,0.16932982779885294,0.08383302857467799,0.0,0.0973918269858529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809670040867824,0.08375875749053006,0.07502287996000638,0.0,0.08789462886170649,0.09277336064129377,0.06880119162241859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630964449383324,0.41732333122467785,0.12370779113365435,0.0,0.5217170015354585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07617864317672797,0.15973175828088115,0.0,0.08557323708379554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06204725260436605,0.06258510268577543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098869880058181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28116468358700536,0.0,0.0,0.11703134579200812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515374967298833,0.08083648351727407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607116087978658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725971161795569,0.07683897582762905,0.17610526531582318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18974910258367125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740579628466163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346191844992727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984342556981844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956829642837274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17203143987307115,0.059958760658602436,0.0,0.0,0.05435393514856094
mentalhealth,jimpixco,2020/04/02,"I (20f) just realized i might be the manipulative, emotionally abusive one and i don’t know how to handle it. I’ve had severe depression anxiety and adhd my whole life. my parents were extremely manipulative and emotionally abusive to me. i haven’t spoken to them in 2 years but that really fucked me up mentally. about a month ago something happened that really opened my eyes and made me realize i need to change some things in my life. i spent a lot of time working on my self and about a week ago something just clicked and i’ve been feeling so much better. i truly believe this is the first time in my life i haven’t been depressed. 

with my new found mental health i’ve been more receptive to the things people say to me and last night my boyfriend told me he doesn’t love me the way he used to because i treated him so badly for so long and he was scared to tell me because of how i would react. i took a step back and realized he’s right. all i can think about now is that sometimes i’ll do something to make him feel sorry for me so he stops being mad. i would tell him my actions are a response the way he treats me and would refuse to believe his actions were in response to mine. 

i’m so ashamed in myself because i know first hand how hard it is to deal with manipulative, emotionally abusive people, and how detrimental it can be to your mental health, and now i’m that person?? the person making others feel how horribly i felt for years??? 

and the worst part is, it took me a very long time to even realize i’m doing it, what if i keep doing it without realizing? how do i know i’ve stopped being that person? how can i know in the moment i’m in the right to feel this way and am not subconsciously manipulating the other person? 

any advice would be appreciated but really i’m just so ashamed in myself it’s all i’ve been able to think about and i need to get it off my chest.",2.6928138528138525,4.4952921168831175,4.254025974025975,85.34294372294373,75.88311688311687,7.1601731601731595,24.39393939393939,8.00094639256281,1.2996406926406925,1495,49,310,24,33,499,168,385,0.177,0.757,0.066,-0.9933,1,0,3,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,1,4,24,13,2,3,16,0,35,10,3,16,2,74,67,31,0,7,8,1,7,0,0,5,5,1,0,5,20,18,0,4,17,0,1,5,6,9,0,3,15,10,48,4,40,42,9,44,0,2,2,2,25,14,1,4,22,210,68,1,0.07644463657963695,0.2717231820821715,0.0,0.0,0.09187159772443712,0.07470081412864539,0.13552711584482185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051984974272439234,0.0,0.0584799377452507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05878120688393045,0.06382807844939374,0.13979982277644765,0.0,0.0,0.17225385529107784,0.0,0.06760906884719027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086828930417256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881106364087763,0.13168330694123606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25796978095590833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050490961494311835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461082063597287,0.0,0.07339883923631811,0.0,0.0,0.13004753764575694,0.0,0.08381759829723802,0.0,0.07067183470541141,0.039939167476840134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759973966508367,0.0,0.06847937911850194,0.0,0.0,0.16251414794357902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794750541086471,0.0,0.0,0.1680478922568378,0.062312581742134325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16198532265805413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530219560110784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499049633393371,0.06899426911100172,0.07233376348563858,0.10205477703847797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311146411055917,0.08109567896524808,0.0,0.0,0.061017379593491676,0.0,0.05619560371865115,0.11336545879465565,0.0,0.07383070636529493,0.0,0.07173811292828843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0518008641491067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488272230887617,0.08278209194029414,0.0,0.10599417145385973,0.26699403221700363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146917175009122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13056660390522387,0.0,0.06079184327117184,0.07653441709089162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974842790830959,0.08636068023428044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17655244795811775,0.07560570026155691,0.08557351203632581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278222782896275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363196360870194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10157283952503604,0.0979652728421871,0.0,0.0,0.1337264470232074,0.0,0.0,0.07304612621477387,0.16986560800586875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602362169754726,0.0,0.06307483110819752,0.0,0.18203458293591293,0.0613192763947886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534770674580708,0.0,0.07368990172955213,0.0,0.05565260588120319,0.0,0.0,0.2172163060896062,0.0,0.0,0.09845567924285056
mentalhealth,perrete,2020/04/02,"I hate that I'm loving this quarantine It's been two weeks since I started working from home. I live alone in a small apartment, and in my country we're only allowed to go out for essential stuff (groceries, doctor etc) so I go out maybe once a week for less than an hour.

I'm anticipating the anxiety of having to go out again.

I'm an introvert and don't have any outdoors hobbies, I don't have any friends left aside from my coworkers,  and I'm kind of wishing I could stay home forever..

 Obviously I want the situation to get better, I'm just discovering it's so much easier for me to live this way. No anxiety, no social gatherings to make excuses for, nobody asks about your weekend and so on.. 

I just wanted to get it out of my chest because I feel so alienated and guilty, everyone I know is having a really hard time.",4.5582256297918935,5.262106060240967,6.289430449069005,76.8490525739321,69.72289156626506,10.132749178532311,31.35596933187295,10.230975488527342,3.1982602409638563,650,27,129,17,11,225,103,166,0.128,0.7929999999999999,0.079,-0.7206,1,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,2,8,5,1,0,7,0,9,3,1,2,1,20,29,9,0,4,2,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,7,9,0,0,2,1,0,3,4,1,0,1,1,2,15,4,24,27,3,22,0,0,0,1,7,10,0,0,7,80,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509899512151173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19827846200778368,0.0,0.2230512234876052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362898891128667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886956996395863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893554701542262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163979668641186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14921777489097424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16258951971960195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930442175067584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371359742529207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126336199657456,0.0,0.1523339544168554,0.0,0.2485600080089705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305952937449381,0.14393313247136966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924697570825145,0.0,0.1435694841972356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15181330475678426,0.08011997237344236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15839651899283036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574627732470669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315772274406347,0.0,0.09731304340793327,0.0,0.1464612652808095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10716921603672287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525694334885753,0.0,0.11087654477143537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09339401083690052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059538378094956,0.16386916192106168,0.0,0.1486100956667502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318782280905632,0.15538808951631744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16688967316985787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500877614676558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241138191580754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17197628939963544,0.11571785130194435,0.23388088548953684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16764628551197813,0.0,0.0,0.10613367858008692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reddituser6098,2020/04/02,"I (18F) need advice on how to help my boyfriend (18M) get through his depression. I myself am a sufferer of mental health issues, though I feel as though I cope as best I can. I remind myself of how lucky I am, whilst also not dismissing how I feel. I take necessary days off to in the long term aid my mental health. I have routines and resources to look forward to , I also have outlets to vent to in times of despair. I’ve dealt with depression long enough to over come it for the most part whilst still suffering . My brother attempted suicide when I was 12, and from that point onwards it was the beginning of my mental health issues. Though going through that, I know suicide is an option I will never consider, whilst even feeling suicidal. The lasting damage is too painful on those you love and I’ve learned how precious life is through this. In conclusion, I’ve come to terms with my depression being apart of me, and I’ve tried my best to adapt.
I’m glad I’m growing up in a period of time where mental health for the most part is normalised, if not I don’t think I would cope as-well as I do. Though my boyfriend on the other hand, struggles to see the light, and struggles to get through the day with his underlying depressive thoughts. These depressive thoughts have become darker. He doesn’t put the pressure of suicide on our relationship, though he has made it clear he has suicidal thoughts, and finds it hard to see past these thoughts. With everything going on right now and for him to not have his usual resources of happiness that help him through the day, he is getting worse. Also me not being there in person to comfort him is hurting him a lot. I feel myself getting overwhelmed by everything also but I’m still coping and believe this is temporary and it will all be okay. If I didn’t think this way I also would be cracking up alike him. But he can’t seem to take on this ‘it will be okay’ mindset, which is important right now. But it would be ignorant of me to get annoyed that he doesn’t think this way, because that’s an element of depression which he has, negative thoughts and feelings of despair.
I have voiced that I think he needs professional help, as have his friends( he got the courage to openly discuss his mental health to his friends, and have they also in return). He’s aware it isn’t fair to put this stress over us by opening up about how he feels(regarding his suicidal thoughts), though he can’t come to terms with getting to the point of talking to his parents. That would be the first step in getting towards professional help.
I can’t help put feel overwhelmed when the topic comes up. I don’t know how to react. I’m not a professional. My advice to him is to realise how he currently feels is only temporary, and that I myself go through bouts of depression. I get out of them. I’m okay for a while. I fall back. He has never experienced depression up until 2 years ago. I have experienced depression for the past 6 years. Hence, my reasoning for my development of coping mechanisms. He can’t come to terms with why he isn’t like his old self, why he isn’t happy all the time. We all have our breaking point I believe, when childhood happiness just fades. Though he often thinks back to when he didn’t feel this way. But I don’t know how to help that. 
With my experiences , and relatability to how he feels in ways, still doesn’t help. I never turn things on myself ,I simply resonate. I’m aware of how annoying it is when your upset and someone ignorantly makes it about them. I give advice as to how I deal . How I think he should approach things that will help him. But I can’t help him. I don’t know how to help him. But all I want to do, is to help and be there. I believe he is only going to get worse as this goes on, and I don’t know where else to go for advice. I myself will probably only worsen to, I feel we all will. But how do we keep sane in the midst of a pandemic? How can I help him keep sane and halt his worsening thoughts? I’m trying my best and advice is really what I need right now.",3.966209109730848,5.32342866335404,4.638027950310562,85.70677277432712,71.6832298136646,7.900828157349896,27.826604554865426,8.395991825355821,1.8187014492753624,3194,116,651,51,60,1023,272,805,0.13,0.748,0.121,-0.8906,2,0,0,0,0,3,89.0,6,2,3,6,51,45,2,7,25,3,73,9,1,19,9,131,146,68,6,11,15,2,12,1,2,11,7,1,0,2,37,36,0,5,33,0,0,18,27,27,0,1,13,19,96,18,113,114,18,110,0,17,3,1,77,40,0,9,50,445,133,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951389211147473,0.03540338278269242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19163451448114924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061421024265674626,0.0,0.02434635365700136,0.044109324518118574,0.0,0.1349922294881672,0.12574008434115982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720189241011529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07727176700484535,0.04117520300194199,0.3095934745901652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033363786246761735,0.0,0.0,0.04126751074382005,0.0,0.02637923526530361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717889303325037,0.03906786120458833,0.0,0.0,0.20194283746099087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03650338743980721,0.03397196735516045,0.0,0.0,0.061713316413401074,0.0,0.1877976171560048,0.038312986384287366,0.1134908507382918,0.0,0.03194274865995934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754695276815692,0.03577736686183703,0.0,0.0,0.21226566179706174,0.0,0.0,0.3212420497819055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042755367411509385,0.0,0.0,0.08337157070249257,0.0,0.07099897398965622,0.0,0.0,0.10974674363700032,0.03255549518401238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028209992504660563,0.019512105839574783,0.0,0.0,0.07068925494864745,0.03353857706667425,0.0,0.0,0.03395458399014304,0.036046373508688716,0.037791107717912026,0.026659494033891614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012448469503939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884245872917881,0.09240991511473494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04190910704033034,0.0,0.0,0.09112589064062576,0.042497754735091424,0.0,0.04434736902361296,0.08649977003480218,0.07625230737241034,0.0,0.03487306530634124,0.0,0.0,0.11326537437606225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04306083780156831,0.0,0.0,0.12044873320962472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025585851469779212,0.04106379196064657,0.0,0.042879380661315004,0.0,0.1023226849006122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365218874909491,0.03635883112649037,0.04166493327857105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03384005993890096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568565708990316,0.0,0.045749820358977636,0.08350552013620781,0.0,0.2621197324038063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06005809294127355,0.03210133661392105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530671975953104,0.15354722332381285,0.2746780371605461,0.2219489125365584,0.06986599785024407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054231718099677716,0.04344200256145267,0.0,0.0,0.048041521763773284,0.0,0.04398700327896024,0.0,0.023556969860664283,0.12680640778921298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207720420140316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140220511037717,0.1134856590608489,0.0,0.0,0.0514386228561921
mentalhealth,Kami-Kahzy,2020/04/02,"My girlfriend needs help, and Im not sure how to convince her. My girlfriend and I have been dating for over a year now and I couldnt be happier with her. In fact Im planning on popping the question in a few month's time. But she suffers from bouts of severe depression, anxiety, and more recently she's mentioned hearing voices in her head. Im terrified she might be suffering from schizophrenia, but more so that she might follow through on the suicidal thoughts that have plagued her since she was 14 or so. I know there is help she can get, even now with COVID raging through the world. How can I try to convince her that she should seek professional help? She has a will to live, I know that much from how long she's coped with her own mind and the way she talks and acts in her low moments. But how can I phrase my words to try and convince her to seek the help she needs?",4.412457627118645,5.247609751412433,4.295833333333333,90.53493644067801,70.12994350282486,7.707909604519775,28.87429378531073,7.793537801064563,1.5080361581920907,694,25,151,8,12,212,95,177,0.153,0.747,0.099,-0.853,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,10,9,1,0,8,0,16,1,1,4,2,33,24,17,1,4,5,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,4,10,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,3,2,28,4,22,14,5,21,0,4,0,0,29,9,0,4,9,105,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146806095351446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291171168085838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990140288009018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832169881101188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385073444142305,0.0,0.168959273386671,0.0,0.4019255960135487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4857850227714337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647730440400099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323731262573554,0.13266548205447212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180612788923954,0.15136619368766702,0.0,0.11965659598512833,0.0,0.11020097380616192,0.22231247870742232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16793331793924074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14801787174753667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16935543762512492,0.0,0.12400696040021952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16397702253617902,0.0,0.1412882405497103,0.0,0.0,0.1204918427722146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901165983235387,0.08741362734456799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20355786829448388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899144522864853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653701545436197
mentalhealth,nkw2000zm,2020/04/02,"I'm very lost (help me) Hi, I won't say my name cause I value my privacy.

I'm 17 years old right now and I have been diagnosed with ADHD and ADD at a very young age. I always had problems concentrating, I never had amazinh grades but I wasn't dumb. I loved computers and everything around it and I was very sporty aswell, I would hang out with my friends playing soccer and stuff all day.

Growing up I always had problems with my concentration, I couldn't keep my eyes or ears focused for even a minute, even if I really wanted to. Because I had so much trouble concentrating, my grades were awful. I thought I looked stupid, so I became the cool kid. Make alot friends, never pay attention and only come to school to make some fun. Not to learn.

Of course, this didn't work very well... Long story short, I got kicked out of multiple high schools and to this day, I haven't started at a new one.

Because I was ""the cool kid"" I hung out with the other ""cool kids"", tho these kids came from very different backgrounds. They already had older brothers who were criminals or had grown up in thougher neighborhoods. I didn't. Even tho I'm pretty tall and can come up for myself. I was some times a little scared. So what did I do? I became one of them.

I would start f*cking around on the streets, just messing with people, throwing stuff, yelling, screaming, intimidating ect. Gradually I became older and started seeing the need of money in my life. I started planning with my friends to rob people and I became more interested in guns and violence. 

One day I broke into someone's house with 2 friends and I got caught. This changed my life forever. I never had any problems with the police before and I got restricted from being and talking with those friends.

Because I couldn't be with my ""bad"" friends anymore, I would go back to my old friends. Tho I soon realised, I had become very different than them and we just didn't match up anymore. 

I was feeling quite depressed sometimes but I was making new friends... They were totally different, they all had fun in a nice way, just messing around but without being violent or bad behaving in any kind of way. That did do somethings that you'd probaly considering very bad tho. Drugs. Many, many drugs.

To keep this as short as possible (just realised how long I've been typing -_-), I started smoking weed. Gradually starting using XTC. Then 2CB, Ketamine, LSD. You know the drill...

I was only focused on doing drugs, every single day. I woke up, I'd think ""what am I going to do today?"". Drugs, I'm not addicted to a specific drug I can assure you. But I'm definitely addicted to escaping reality with the use of drugs.

Even tho I was always looking for a way to escape reality, it recently became inevitable. I was feeling like I was on LSD while I hadn't used it for months. I felt extreme anxiety on random occations, hard time thinking and stuff. I noticed it, sure. But I didn't know what to think of it. I had always have mental issues (not like this tho) so I thought it was kinda normal or something.

But I now realise it is not, I came across a YouTube video about the early signs of schizophrenia, and I was to my surprise shocked that I could relate to every single topic...

Lets evaluate what I experience:
Room turning (like I'm upside down)
Increases or decreases of light indoors
Color shifting (mostly like a yellow tint snapchat filter)
Weird thoughts (can't explain :( )
Depression
I don't want to go outside
Scared of shadows
Random movements in normal objects like doors and chairs.
Constant anxiousness.
Weird voice like sounds (unlocatable)

I experience more than I just listed I just can't seem to get my mind clear enough to write them down.

I'm really lost right now, like actually right now while I write this. I've forgotten my subject about 4 times now while I'm writing this. So I'll stop before I make myself crazy.

I've never posted before, so I'm no expert or anything on reddit.

But please give me some advice or help me. Any kind of help is appreciated.

Regards N.",2.716810262907825,5.331363818181824,3.70336395312005,85.23636997149192,79.64935064935065,6.301552106430155,26.143490655685767,7.5451710244155885,1.6064643649033896,3180,129,587,49,82,1020,342,770,0.128,0.696,0.17600000000000002,0.9901,3,0,8,1,1,0,128.0,1,3,6,5,36,53,3,2,19,4,61,14,2,9,10,134,122,52,0,15,26,1,4,7,8,4,11,6,2,4,28,42,0,4,15,3,2,14,23,23,1,3,47,20,92,30,81,63,15,101,0,5,6,1,37,38,1,17,52,373,120,9,0.0,0.0,0.04695478073032355,0.10490821388912236,0.057826704245330075,0.04701890456351065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05309777416650358,0.0,0.1601471902220005,0.0,0.0,0.09816264678894872,0.0,0.03680900461123058,0.054357969579589716,0.09543731323256603,0.0,0.0,0.03959579456607274,0.12850170708902572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03699863232874274,0.12052584824240135,0.08799414841451997,0.05314091386870952,0.1228308387469048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100649565360737,0.0,0.049428918347195525,0.05090089607937998,0.08289623955309079,0.0,0.051996862311050725,0.0,0.03841712439006005,0.0,0.0,0.12412469426053002,0.0,0.08288537298957192,0.048837252980887175,0.0,0.1508145608653615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3347993097607576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04971722550665178,0.0,0.12712202551005794,0.0,0.08108048341917412,0.0,0.04324402385667148,0.09413437498708176,0.0,0.0,0.048658314536234745,0.0343744501124934,0.04619940301027459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973976199277193,0.0,0.025138894747594214,0.04615774854280851,0.082037178168432,0.0,0.11544952504802986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04310294912979544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675446339841208,0.050837743105067036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05552000158787819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05022114378537256,0.0,0.08553634413515611,0.0,0.10021189836959857,0.05288715993453564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04920239970488381,0.06797223935321556,0.16455110183663055,0.04822539175377128,0.0,0.08516320867997618,0.08081151342261511,0.0,0.10504972677773043,0.0,0.04342703613875844,0.0,0.12847259772989492,0.09756519424288727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048490133073426006,0.0,0.048583966757922516,0.0,0.03840614565299267,0.0,0.035371177127812604,0.035677788455457445,0.14844170005247526,0.09294246594068094,0.0,0.0,0.09428794317921807,0.0,0.05478097471953911,0.10098038325796226,0.0,0.09781499369764884,0.07318956038805807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06671587036915992,0.0,0.0,0.0528174877049963,0.0,0.05424414446711501,0.0460823236624309,0.04895179706223578,0.0,0.13812302850225447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05117783973057142,0.0,0.0,0.061649347119547615,0.0,0.04750925675913783,0.0,0.0,0.12327373054386705,0.0,0.03826418641280956,0.09634605713462008,0.0973929701795398,0.038342635223092864,0.04380347090706689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04076896960384028,0.07408489271795529,0.04758846669239106,0.0,0.20434271480133612,0.0,0.0,0.04022756360888058,0.0,0.0,0.1652457041900269,0.0,0.0,0.04534924883106033,0.0,0.0,0.038674234591148805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249336572903703,0.0,0.11459742200489854,0.08417138586164925,0.0,0.045608832999179984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052336954637655884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12467166805658213,0.0,0.2779081659525108,0.056760738009449,0.11457795717704265,0.0,0.0,0.04326252829279082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04638260636288892,0.0,0.03502939820886816,0.0,0.0,0.10254178168738036,0.0,0.0,0.03098546006528747
mentalhealth,sherileenbenjamin,2020/04/02,"Steadily declining mental health Ever since COVID-19 has started to change our daily lives, it’s drastically affected my mental health. I found a way to cope with my depression, anxiety, OCD, etc. through my hobbies, daily rituals and a structured schedule. My world’s been shaken upside down and I know a lot of other people are struggling, and have it worse. I’m thankful I still have a job, thankful I’m still physically healthy, but every waking day feels like I’m dying without the sweet release of death. And I dread waking up having to go through it over and over again. I’m having a difficult time finding meaning, a purpose, something to keep me going. I normally reach out to the suicide hotline once every few months when things get incredibly difficult to handle. Just this past week, I’ve reached out 4 times. I’m struggling and I honestly don’t know what to do...",5.21076923076923,7.3042624320987715,5.586049382716052,77.20876068376072,69.74074074074073,7.9475783475783475,33.44919278252612,8.617729084823388,3.042705033238366,702,34,115,12,13,224,107,162,0.223,0.6829999999999999,0.094,-0.9738,1,0,1,0,0,1,24.0,1,0,0,0,6,11,0,3,8,0,9,4,2,1,1,23,26,8,3,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,9,0,1,6,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,2,2,12,5,19,24,3,23,1,1,0,0,1,7,0,1,14,71,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801950720013527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149373496203219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106391524982388,0.0,0.12161748516423193,0.0,0.14654587647927567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574780852703463,0.0,0.1277257230022181,0.2379383510907475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139621422674403,0.10087507664617164,0.0,0.0,0.12905650442580072,0.0,0.0,0.15482122607939744,0.0,0.0,0.07377246548423881,0.0,0.1604972415751408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001832568698474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401216689445964,0.12550724800585486,0.0,0.0,0.15520237544267262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898439707257685,0.0,0.12468437273590555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200452951448952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538108906451184,0.0,0.0,0.28459776807234594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270646872170854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834844577712413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15037602796090335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347937401715418,0.09789201739926964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680414680489964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10870456409906272,0.0,0.0,0.0999438388600324,0.0,0.22552895852148086,0.0,0.0,0.2952309712847354,0.0,0.15445259000890954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26000053641249155,0.0,0.0,0.09380865039740803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16467259786307342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120799525458704,0.11326410857152247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13611414747272133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389738570729227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,babyviolet13,2020/04/02,"I’m concerned about my mental health So I’ve been writing every week just rambling about what I’ve been feeling and it doesn’t make much sense and it’s really just bits and pieces but I need some advice so I’m gonna post my most recent one 



It’s almost like an addiction. Almost every thought I have is about food or the calories in it or binging and then making myself vomit till veins pop in my face. When it happens it’s an endless cycle. Eating,purging, eating then purging. And it doesn’t stop for at least an hour. I can’t help myself from doing it. And I feel so horrible about eating that the anxiety of not throwing up is way worse than actually vomiting. Seeing numbers drop on the scale makes me so happy that I don’t even want to stop. I’m so embarrassed. I just wish I had a normal relationship with food. I can’t eat without overthinking it anymore and it consumes my thoughts. I have little to no motivation for anything. All I want to do is sleep or just stay in bed. I cry a lot. Too much. My boyfriend is worried. I made him cry for the first time in years bc I was seriously thinking about ending my life. Seeing the way it affected him made me realize that I need to get better and live a better life not only for me but for him. He’s my everything nowadays. I can’t see a future without him and it’s so scary. My ex boyfriend was also my life. And I also couldn’t see a future without him. It feels like it’s almost a matter of time till we break up or something and I’m terrified that is the case. Because I have no purpose without him. I don’t see any reason to live without him bc all of my goals and future is with him. I want to get married and have a family. I realize that I’m a very family oriented person. Maybe that stems from me having a really rough family situation my whole life but it seems like the things that make me happy is my relationship and the future of things. I want to love myself and feel comfortable and confident for once in my life. I cry about taking a picture. I can’t even look at myself most of the time without breaking down. 


I know it’s a little rough to read but I’ve been struggling really hard lately and I’m looking for something to help. Thank you!",1.2146813186813183,3.5368125890109923,3.2082307692307697,88.26926923076924,83.54945054945055,5.925714285714285,21.62747252747253,7.24861992348623,0.8329156043956045,1748,57,354,26,50,588,193,455,0.136,0.7240000000000001,0.14,0.4024,0,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,1,1,0,5,22,13,0,2,23,0,29,18,3,9,2,82,71,38,0,9,20,1,7,3,0,1,9,0,1,1,26,20,5,2,13,1,0,1,19,3,0,2,10,14,56,10,51,59,12,42,0,0,7,1,19,13,0,12,24,245,82,3,0.0,0.0,0.06531870136189094,0.07296880303614768,0.0,0.0654079038977133,0.0,0.0,0.20107657590778427,0.0,0.0,0.10705545767996193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04551795373315648,0.0,0.051204932537928384,0.0,0.06638132757580302,0.0,0.0,0.05508163045851088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040802827830550586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11839676794299199,0.07307545671435735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220574177413886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205473006979765,0.0,0.0,0.05928435825862004,0.0,0.0,0.08841959744737732,0.0,0.11279089797377252,0.0,0.06015667491247057,0.0,0.18930049406749436,0.0,0.13537696764975918,0.04781822865434352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056934699733119036,0.1618756319312334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994133219434588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05919021535574809,0.14250666109129007,0.05996042614267118,0.0,0.0,0.07114855369853472,0.0,0.0,0.08972996007155581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591728696106562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03678561109126377,0.0,0.07550536065348518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363901148165932,0.09810287483703327,0.1341724916198146,0.11820929496830672,0.0,0.11241673435065926,0.0,0.0,0.0569055663992361,0.0604112629312679,0.1266706368817018,0.1787179732028008,0.0,0.06724499503622071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674545269290546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09840954721520297,0.09926260002188647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558188438704535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128336877887595,0.045356747226989215,0.05090692538053202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844487842675344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410502808342224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06695290533077428,0.0,0.12864042482015228,0.06882011397045383,0.06609003185423114,0.14372583354806712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26669181504107353,0.060934920582968816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075237510469707,0.06698313133165852,0.0,0.0,0.10305934577065813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134358212854866,0.0,0.11192096621539632,0.0,0.0699747775174215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05032663331515519,0.0,0.0,0.06162456334002859,0.0,0.0,0.08893700294658205,0.042889111893346064,0.0,0.10627749604129932,0.11709064616636475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055228213234525474,0.15791949775735575,0.1062594443859548,0.05369105255801557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747303046939523,0.07697170726662385,0.3871365044770137,0.0,0.0,0.06797553019091307,0.06821227126943358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043103811392271055
mentalhealth,jebdjdhndjsnsnnnnshs,2020/04/02,"Worried about mental heath I (16f) am worried about my mental state- I don’t think it’s just hormones. I’m not constantly sad or anything, I can be happy often. It’s just awful mood swings- one week you may be the best person in the world, I’d do anything you ask, I feel like I’d die for you. The next I hate you, I never want to talk to you again.

I know I’m unreasonable, but I want to have friends, I don’t want to be lonely- no one does. Yet everything I do pushes people away. Am I just a normal teenager with mood swings or do I need help?",-0.6524293785310746,1.4660427966101717,1.6780000000000008,97.04355367231639,91.3728813559322,4.1636158192090384,18.036158192090394,5.6839178017228535,-0.4645238418079098,422,12,98,3,15,142,71,118,0.16899999999999998,0.6920000000000001,0.138,0.09,0,2,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,5,0,1,9,9,1,0,4,1,13,0,0,0,1,19,24,3,1,5,7,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,3,0,2,0,1,18,4,10,20,1,11,0,2,0,0,10,3,0,4,7,62,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28572257943410034,0.0,0.16229629352286692,0.0,0.16310666097623933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.182186674395608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18760423657116054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18017353051904925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15192201938226038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15602406994030732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777939231027093,0.12402272337762248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341260101207165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18480467287644145,0.0,0.17139799633921465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163630934249258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09540821140881388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481413922998955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3499039746688993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12872515702377205,0.1338940975278393,0.0,0.1846298102301808,0.0,0.17009504816065438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352771097107824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203551461712598,0.1515843056913738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953630917272608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123842538607273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30718838930446096,0.0,0.1392546471637506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3526065525452733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Red_Prez16,2020/04/02,"Hey, everyone! I want to be your friend in this weird time. I know this is a weird time, so I want to help some people out, and myself (As I'm lonely as well.). I don't care if you're male or female. I just want to help. If you want to talk, please fill out this [form](https://RedBird16.com/social-media-usernames). I'm doing it like this as it will be more confidential.  All it asks is for your username for different social medias (Like Twitter, Facebook, Discord, et cetera. All are optional). 

I hope to help a few of you guys out! 

Red Prez",1.4281464174454823,3.8508815887850494,2.6650700934579445,91.83691978193147,83.57943925233644,5.43582554517134,18.26246105919003,6.816661863887847,0.04287601246105899,418,10,88,5,12,134,68,107,0.1,0.674,0.22699999999999998,0.9071,1,2,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,4,0,0,3,9,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,0,2,18,18,8,0,7,4,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,7,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,1,11,6,15,15,6,7,0,1,1,0,14,4,0,6,4,56,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18332428708448956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999340296427829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048796985498414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18737915168461866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150410801835687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19416692730001653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3943191926696357,0.0,0.0,0.1947686348005079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776981999322556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191606244006204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359490157776585,0.0,0.0,0.21525569342379675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39979253074456794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15761539494361124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286915542227043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4626525247740863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17631481411885466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwRA_1701,2020/04/02,"How to deal with feelings of inferiority and questioning of one's identity as a male individual? So there is this acquaintance, calling him John, whom I've recently met and we been speaking now and then and just getting to know each other.

I will endeavour to keep this back story as brief as possible. John is very much into cycling and mountain biking as a professional, almost to an obsessive degree in my opinion. Please note that this is merely my perception of him. He comes off as rather arrogant, but not to the point of being an a**hole. He also tends to project an insane amount of confidence in himself.  Unfortunately though he has become toxic and I don't know how to process the situation. 

Here are some examples of things he's said: He was saying at one point how he is so straight that he makes pole dancing poles look bent. Another one where I asked him what are his plans during our lockdown, he replied saying how he is going to work out doing all manner of push ups and work on his abs that by the time the lockdown is over, he is going to have abs strong enough to grate cheese. He made other comparisons but I can't quite remember what else he said. Also, I inadvertently came across a post he made on Instagram where he is doing the typical Superman pose next to his fancy bicycle dressed in his cycle gear.

This next part might seem very awkward but I feel it's necessary to mention. Another aspect of this whole situation is how can someone who claims to be so straight, he makes poles look bent, be so comfortable and willing to squeeze himself into skin tight outfits and even pose for such a photo which is potentially so revealing.  I just can't seem to understand that, perhaps there is something I'm missing? 

Apologies in advance if I offend anyone, it is not my intention to.

So I hope that this whole thing makes sense but I will happily elaborate further if necessary.  


Any advice is greatly appreciated.",6.585849802371541,7.447519584022039,6.9811953527368535,73.12143729788002,65.28099173553719,10.2799856270212,34.51539106479818,10.276239652853533,3.6622543777697927,1551,68,272,36,23,505,205,363,0.054000000000000006,0.848,0.098,0.9737,0,2,1,0,0,0,32.0,2,0,0,6,27,9,1,2,12,0,32,1,1,11,1,58,60,35,0,4,11,0,5,0,0,4,0,5,0,1,22,17,0,2,11,2,0,8,5,5,0,3,8,12,24,4,46,45,9,39,0,2,2,0,41,23,0,10,7,191,46,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356605941585673,0.0,0.0,0.10612738097712096,0.0,0.0,0.16951027674290428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207256034665728,0.22226633155039188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07410627757697061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09908046651421686,0.0,0.0,0.08149493463609324,0.0,0.0,0.11705068619167272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082212224197329,0.1212171352569639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09129558579262526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109264556147964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853579411608566,0.0,0.0,0.10950950853945192,0.0,0.07000124401694333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10717710123442464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055372116625167035,0.0,0.12046597494311738,0.0,0.0,0.11684741963518698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526574250076096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094203195301487,0.0,0.0,0.11649175579404593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17799925536986955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200568706895886,0.21223485765972366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124319728513302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791022496238087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254297659294381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154519239249578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477003500514438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633829245135235,0.200377734750528,0.1194807140020723,0.10150310209795574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11872601599999386,0.11272672639899985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464613231628817,0.0,0.12005888848835547,0.0,0.20162956545210284,0.1685650076417929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19296718682394245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382602717797606,0.0,0.0,0.08979965755287522,0.08159144148797934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082174144944518,0.0,0.10412846160458523,0.0,0.0617999563522207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033278474091904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748953283145475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366540651784904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15431481315354878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IHSAD,2020/04/02,"What is happening? I [17F] have really bad anxiety. College usually helped as I was always distracted by friends or by classes. But now that the coronavirus lockdown is happening I can't stop thinking about my future. Like my first year of college is effectively over and I only have a year left until I go university. And a majority of my thoughts surround the topic of friends, I'm scared I won't have friends in university because I have such bad social anxiety. But that's not my issue, my issue is that after crying over this topic and having a panic attack I was happy. Like I saw something that wasn't even funny but I was laughing because I felt like laughing but why am I so happy after I've been thinking about something that can cause a panic attack. 

Tldr: why am I so happy after having a panic attack",4.1084615384615395,6.092626000000003,5.955668789808923,73.87373836354732,72.43949044585987,7.888094071533562,29.911317981381675,8.617729084823388,2.7285927486526207,650,28,106,12,13,224,81,157,0.203,0.589,0.20800000000000002,0.4156,0,1,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,7,21,3,5,7,0,20,0,0,2,0,16,29,12,0,0,6,0,1,3,3,1,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,5,0,0,1,4,10,0,1,8,2,18,11,15,20,1,17,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,1,14,82,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946108915356662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396659850136065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3880643697022524,0.0,0.0,0.18987629133755035,0.138625886513173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168053969848388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489857734410707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510046320921362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917373451656474,0.0,0.0,0.0967166204342759,0.0,0.0,0.2635424379560673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462064100595027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20109626006000966,0.3631202776530539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621343864552922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373550072724155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353980037760305,0.0,0.0,0.1666501896664141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864770658769433,0.0,0.40022166754314425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07284173622386635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383760587765088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159069761728654,0.0,0.17506989013428292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09506169048780633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14571394861819162,0.0,0.09026832751830956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522896468420774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20520046801622685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14644338110988106
mentalhealth,LopsidedGarage2,2020/04/02,"I [25F] haven't had an interest or pleasure in an activities feeling very lost Hi, Im F25. I realise that I have no interest/motivation/pleasure in doing/ to do things. For example, I cannot physically bring myself to put on a tv show that I used to watch or a new movie or something despite the fact that this was one of my favourite things to do and discuss and I have felt this way for years. I was depressed at uni for 2 years but I'm still here. any advice how to get out of it?",2.353529411764708,3.6110154803921617,4.190343137254903,87.72904411764708,75.56862745098039,7.452941176470588,27.45588235294117,8.07648339933343,1.5773882352941175,377,15,85,6,8,128,70,102,0.08,0.88,0.04,-0.3992,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,5,0,10,0,0,2,1,12,17,7,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,2,2,0,2,3,2,0,1,5,3,9,2,15,12,0,12,0,2,1,0,2,5,0,3,4,58,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516212371027734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510550172399045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22178015718326746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019726227782938,0.0,0.2472356820468411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453056498247307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781389004817144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810863253249225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486903775883118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17448534761273413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258853701801549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982323124004137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056359239904059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3421366130403446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22239309655892786,0.0,0.21246042922853692,0.0,0.20438762945270014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3316368114571865
mentalhealth,oceanicguy,2020/04/02,"I don't know how to live normally anymore. Hello all who read this, I just want advice to get rid of this. For the past 5 weeks I have been over thinking things nonstop. I feel like nothing is real anymore like it's an allusion, but I know that everything is real. I keep questioning everything in life and I can't live properly any more it feels like non of action lns are controlled by me and that my body is on autopilot and I'm just stuck here with these thoughts. I would really appreciate for any help please.",1.9546337157987643,4.3875356019417495,3.298711385701676,88.09013239187998,81.33009708737866,7.240600176522506,23.92674315975287,8.296473431620573,1.6351631067961163,409,15,83,9,11,133,75,103,0.04,0.7829999999999999,0.17800000000000002,0.9229999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,2,0,9,2,1,2,1,23,20,5,0,3,3,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,4,0,2,7,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,2,10,3,11,16,2,6,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,5,51,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15680743090809085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21824742759687013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31828218967873045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1782437258999052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17997845923282862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2884365063815322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227484169561207,0.22927668183922356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838378847366499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755828941032726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263129370641714,0.0,0.0,0.17637798571334148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334326400193515,0.23518961549279965,0.0,0.28339229280950745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15722452780211385,0.15397333309097566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15318482278646406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17614562974033182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976083724646869,0.0,0.1605113824342929,0.36529533314279694,0.10279988260806457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660778066308282,0.10282138777054377,0.0,0.12739363383087685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464815893027227,0.0,0.1287177162493972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139918329758714,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,carlover1995,2020/04/02,"Making my bed keeps me moving Lately finding, Making my bed first thing during this helps me get up and actually do something other than lie in bed all day.",13.195,7.712332500000002,12.236666666666668,60.76500000000003,57.33333333333334,13.333333333333336,40.0,8.841846274778883,3.794000000000002,125,3,21,1,1,41,25,30,0.0,0.9059999999999999,0.094,0.4588,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,6,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,3,5,1,6,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,14,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.3140122636509035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20752240567143188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941024026093559,0.2737071247701187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16811751908098993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156833134454615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28601412495743084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3629834752105421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4295832139220624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34200274178994083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24772306997140114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137772876320304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZyglroxOfficial,2020/04/02,"Released this album back in October to help process Grief from Loss and Depression I'm hoping this will be considered nothing but a mere chapter in my life, and not something I will focus on for the rest of my life.

Thanks for the listen in advance!

https://open.spotify.com/album/5EO0Vad6SliNxPLb7oLKoH?si=VPWtw1tFSayLahumsKfVww",11.513163265306124,15.263059448979591,7.730357142857144,61.45839285714285,56.55102040816327,8.16530612244898,32.65816326530612,8.841846274778883,2.997281632653061,279,10,36,4,4,77,39,49,0.113,0.741,0.146,0.4199,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,1,5,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,0,5,7,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,3,2,9,4,1,6,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,26,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880613197179149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226615205197647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511013395261213,0.0,0.0,0.3720843367904939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5292134260070533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3594600695344771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28840244387784303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449017561147609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Flight2finish,2020/04/02,"I (M26) need to break up with my (M24) boyfriend but he says that he will turn into a ho* forever or kill himself if I ever break up with him. We've been together for 10 months, and about three months ago, circumstances put us in a temporary long distance relationship in super stressful environments. He suffers from depression, self confidence issues and severe anxiety. Since we started the long distance portion, I've started to feel that we are not meant for each other, and it has gotten to the point where when we talk each day it is all just super negative stuff from him about how he hates where he's at, he hates everyone around him and how nothing about his life is good right now.

I have had my own issues with mental health in the past and one of the ways I coped with it was by forcing myself to be positive and optimistic about as much as I can, and hearing such negative things every day from him kind of takes me back to that depressive state I used to be in. I love him very much, but I am convinced that we are not meant to be together as a couple and feel like we need to step away from being together romantically. But he has told me many times as side comments when we've talked, things like there's no point in going on if we aren't together, if you ever broke up with me I'd probably kill myself, I wouldn't want to live anymore if we weren't together, or that if I ever broke up with him that he'd never date or love again and would just be a ho* instead.

I feel like it's super manipulative of him to say that and I don't know how serious he is, but I'm also very worried if he is at all serious about it. He's in a super stressful work environment right now (military) and that adds to his mental health issues and I don't want to be the cause of him having a breakdown or worse, breaking up with him during a time where he's going through a stressful time.

I guess I'm hoping some of you might have some advice or recommendations on what I should do? Am I being selfish in wanting to put my happiness and mental health ahead of his? Should I wait to break up with him until he's out of the stressful work environment, or would that just be leading himon? I'm stuck right now you all, I care so much for him as a person and don't want to hurt him, and I most importantly don't want to be the cause of him doing anything to harm himself.

Any help here, I would be so so so grateful for.",6.565384615384616,5.316675554655873,7.0933230769230775,79.40167692307693,65.72064777327935,10.333149797570853,31.70331983805668,9.3871,2.4920096518218635,1900,59,402,30,25,627,207,494,0.171,0.662,0.166,0.2741,0,0,0,0,0,3,40.0,8,3,0,8,34,33,4,4,16,0,44,8,0,8,7,98,79,47,2,20,21,0,3,3,0,8,4,3,0,2,19,36,0,1,6,0,0,6,13,18,0,2,9,6,58,15,76,51,13,69,0,6,0,4,55,30,0,18,30,291,77,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204908532713014,0.06535808777684395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05896265852809422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050139612141755364,0.0,0.05640401746193435,0.0,0.0731213454281695,0.0,0.0,0.06067433530768511,0.06563622685164361,0.0,0.0,0.06927270682345066,0.056694592151545986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517367410790006,0.15148410575216234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158195529373012,0.0,0.09510079797691842,0.0,0.1270088141426235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20008174719425895,0.0621215521976089,0.07045313550935453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184183537794086,0.1053468902442374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380605921136068,0.06184206934088246,0.0,0.0,0.08122301515901413,0.0,0.0,0.07848802646777474,0.0,0.14558820687602606,0.0,0.2351178333589823,0.08310020190062739,0.0,0.04942033886077126,0.0,0.0,0.07323152494397045,0.0,0.0,0.07893056641973605,0.0,0.0,0.23086804174249864,0.0,0.0,0.16314486704512865,0.07677949628401347,0.04052063243717166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207838972961265,0.10806373509574108,0.0,0.0651058287462502,0.13049923952668235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330902223823376,0.0,0.0,0.07475166712432399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229105357364569,0.07821694531155257,0.0,0.0,0.1177027704463411,0.0,0.16260231810976014,0.1093412127982857,0.05686589687951305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074688839508263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04996203755785954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038458766812042,0.0,0.06437907013941356,0.0,0.0,0.13939926448999787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949449446834211,0.0,0.0,0.1482400505067522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915950693979983,0.0,0.1888976277308144,0.0,0.11726770997422348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691751896003703,0.08329504961476253,0.0,0.060991049735150536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437437048901776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.337834471146489,0.0,0.08440436140635893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554365402631038,0.1185243788168373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796720781724266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12897942685706754,0.0,0.0,0.07045313550935453,0.0,0.0,0.08019816168531045,0.0,0.0,0.08868932145955417,0.06367991579182278,0.0,0.12167160268648748,0.21744228699276208,0.058524240337602014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735410039592468,0.07487741515980957,0.07513819370720709,0.15712917276519367,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reubsterp,2020/04/02,"I (M26) need to break up with my boyfriend (M24) but he says he will kill himself or turn into a ho* if I ever break up with him. We've been together for 10 months, and about three months ago, circumstances put us in a temporary long distance relationship in super stressful environments. He suffers from depression, self confidence issues and severe anxiety. Since we started the long distance portion, I've started to feel that we are not meant for each other, and it has gotten to the point where when we talk each day it is all just super negative stuff from him about how he hates where he's at, he hates everyone around him and how nothing about his life is good right now.

I have had my own issues with mental health in the past and one of the ways I coped with it was by forcing myself to be positive and optimistic about as much as I can, and hearing such negative things every day from him kind of takes me back to that depressive state I used to be in. I love him very much, but I am convinced that we are not meant to be together as a couple and feel like we need to step away from being together romantically. But he has told me many times as side comments when we've talked, things like there's no point in going on if we aren't together, if you ever broke up with me I'd probably kill myself, I wouldn't want to live anymore if we weren't together, or that if I ever broke up with him that he'd never date or love again and would just be a ho* instead.

I feel like it's super manipulative of him to say that and I don't know how serious he is, but I'm also very worried if he is at all serious about it. He's in a super stressful work environment right now (military) and that adds to his mental health issues and I don't want to be the cause of him having a breakdown or worse, breaking up with him during a time where he's going through a stressful time.

I guess I'm hoping some of you might have some advice or recommendations on what I should do? Am I being selfish in wanting to put my happiness and mental health ahead of his? Should I wait to break up with him until he's out of the stressful work environment, or would that just be leading him on? I'm stuck right now you all, I care so much for him as a person and don't want to hurt him, and I most importantly don't want to be the cause of him doing anything to harm himself.

Any help here, I would be so so so grateful for.",6.477038539553753,5.2283167687626815,7.0123618661257625,79.91088356997976,65.89655172413794,10.240941176470589,31.484705882352944,9.281916038205594,2.4132590507099394,1889,58,403,29,25,623,205,493,0.172,0.662,0.16699999999999998,0.2741,0,0,0,0,0,3,40.0,8,3,0,8,34,33,4,4,16,0,44,8,0,8,7,98,79,47,2,20,21,0,3,3,0,8,4,3,0,2,18,36,0,1,6,0,0,6,13,18,0,2,9,6,59,15,77,51,13,70,0,6,0,4,56,31,0,18,30,292,77,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07204908532713014,0.06535808777684395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05896265852809422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050139612141755364,0.0,0.05640401746193435,0.0,0.0731213454281695,0.0,0.0,0.06067433530768511,0.06563622685164361,0.0,0.0,0.06927270682345066,0.056694592151545986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517367410790006,0.15148410575216234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158195529373012,0.0,0.09510079797691842,0.0,0.1270088141426235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20008174719425895,0.0621215521976089,0.07045313550935453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184183537794086,0.1053468902442374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380605921136068,0.06184206934088246,0.0,0.0,0.08122301515901413,0.0,0.0,0.07848802646777474,0.0,0.14558820687602606,0.0,0.2351178333589823,0.08310020190062739,0.0,0.04942033886077126,0.0,0.0,0.07323152494397045,0.0,0.0,0.07893056641973605,0.0,0.0,0.23086804174249864,0.0,0.0,0.16314486704512865,0.07677949628401347,0.04052063243717166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207838972961265,0.10806373509574108,0.0,0.0651058287462502,0.13049923952668235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330902223823376,0.0,0.0,0.07475166712432399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229105357364569,0.07821694531155257,0.0,0.0,0.1177027704463411,0.0,0.16260231810976014,0.1093412127982857,0.05686589687951305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074688839508263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04996203755785954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038458766812042,0.0,0.06437907013941356,0.0,0.0,0.13939926448999787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949449446834211,0.0,0.0,0.1482400505067522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915950693979983,0.0,0.1888976277308144,0.0,0.11726770997422348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691751896003703,0.08329504961476253,0.0,0.060991049735150536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437437048901776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.337834471146489,0.0,0.08440436140635893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554365402631038,0.1185243788168373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796720781724266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12897942685706754,0.0,0.0,0.07045313550935453,0.0,0.0,0.08019816168531045,0.0,0.0,0.08868932145955417,0.06367991579182278,0.0,0.12167160268648748,0.21744228699276208,0.058524240337602014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735410039592468,0.07487741515980957,0.07513819370720709,0.15712917276519367,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,letsbecreativee,2020/04/02,"Of you need anyone to talk to with your problems!!! ⭐ If you need anyone to talk to my insta is @ flaming.gnome I'll try to be as much active as possible. I'll try to be your therapist and I'm a good listner. I'll be able to write, not videochat. I hope I'll be to help (:
And don't be afraid to say anything wrong cuz nothing is wrong for me, trust me I'm the weirdest person ever everything can come out of me haha. and don't be afraid to open up, I won't share your problems with anyone, it Will be between you and me only.",-0.6256766917293248,1.4546147280701796,1.9734335839598995,95.41736842105269,90.31578947368422,5.011528822055138,18.669172932330827,6.5431188927421005,0.004117293233083075,405,12,94,5,14,139,63,114,0.142,0.7090000000000001,0.149,0.4371,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,6,0,0,1,11,0,2,2,1,14,0,0,1,1,19,20,8,0,6,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,0,1,13,5,20,11,1,5,0,0,0,0,13,3,0,2,1,59,14,0,0.17758564630703458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37251603890946,0.0,0.1461378556329933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529743097857621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606363840548364,0.0,0.0,0.15960252811218625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489504146284194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903191537483933,0.0,0.0,0.17638261656721246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305458833020206,0.26335501311422466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17039821714296632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135061886332202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15506093655760758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20020113347751234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3398509601008589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122323370927947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2854732313537399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20619062277496047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411379936289992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3883240527498899,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,butcheroftheworld,2020/04/02,"[19F] My self esteem and mental health are getting worse since the quarantine I guess this isn't really all that terrible, but it has been leaving me feeling really bad about myself in every single way these past few days.  
I was always struggling with self esteem, though I kept it under control for the past few months. I guess using social networks, waking up at 1 pm and not going anywhere (well obviously) for these past few weeks gradually deteriorated my overall mental health.  
It seems to me that everyone is way more connected to each other, while I'm still alone. I feel really unimportant and I dismiss every accomplishment I've made in the past. Whatever I do, it's never enough for me. I feel like I could always do better, but I never actually do. I can't see my improvement in whatever I do, it's really demotivating and depressing. Besides feeling like a failure, I started developing issues with my looks, weight, and especially height. I'm just hoping I can feel better about myself. I feel like a stranger in my own skin.   
Also apologies for any grammar mistakes, english is not my first language",6.987771493212669,7.994846004901966,7.825098039215689,66.91024886877831,64.44117647058823,10.394570135746608,33.339366515837106,10.389873798559362,3.769342081447965,891,36,141,21,13,299,122,204,0.154,0.7340000000000001,0.11199999999999999,-0.8772,0,3,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,5,7,12,0,1,5,0,14,5,2,3,4,33,34,10,0,3,5,0,8,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,11,8,1,2,7,0,0,1,6,5,1,1,4,10,26,7,17,29,9,24,0,1,2,0,4,8,0,4,16,100,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.09999748667602368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612965975385216,0.0,0.08194649066609748,0.1705291375163959,0.0,0.0,0.06968419268982554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555949444889771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18125558190860008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11493059754513413,0.08181522359543777,0.0,0.0,0.06608569600063667,0.0,0.08825862726060332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588054118969832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17267346230323996,0.09791599218111492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108762782299148,0.2196171655147252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716227909098716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05353717456397526,0.0,0.05823696404101194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257680104579768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21784500922850605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017774066687614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695371330504894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085026143267895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501873233064513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605032449367354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696109276302607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20653451514457194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179184267241907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806480929403555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3912828966919496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625836888720166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165658736361102,0.09328628374499554,0.21380042579032527,0.0,0.0,0.08476555522773074,0.0,0.0,0.10445687783969898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252991631120863,0.0,0.08183394131090586,0.0,0.0,0.1071255511295044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067781341537364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850254983950677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626743513364698,0.08219652566338806,0.12478278629606837,0.09213426256584792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442730099018968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tryingclosetomybest,2020/04/02,"How to stop crying when I get shouted at Hi there, hope quarantine is going alright for you <3

Recently I've been doing a lot of things wrong- I keep burning food, can't cook, wake up too late etc. Because of this, I send my family up the wall (especially my dad) and so they shout at me. Without fail when I get shouted at I end up crying, either in front of them (horrible) or when I go back to my bedroom. I just wanted to know if there was any tricks or things I can do to stop myself from crying? Thanks for reading.",1.5888888888888886,3.454631222222221,3.372,90.12300000000002,79.37037037037038,6.171851851851853,21.91111111111111,7.1686216300943375,0.6335377777777773,404,12,87,5,10,135,78,108,0.159,0.748,0.09300000000000001,-0.7684,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,2,1,10,6,1,0,2,1,7,3,1,1,0,15,16,9,0,3,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,3,1,2,3,1,2,0,4,2,3,0,0,2,3,16,3,18,14,3,21,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,5,9,63,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841738516165065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389862961866295,0.0,0.10615073355934372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5738354908627634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423142101527562,0.0,0.19420592216544508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16415844502951585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105640465195532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18195610729187475,0.0,0.19792922139992367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729547821540364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15477868425679936,0.0,0.0,0.0956997298810426,0.0,0.19643122418660325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14804286707712094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17418155536439642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719367439781774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29116836494208564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603195893918023,0.0,0.0,0.2313743582321168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10270899972841566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678593785562167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903886654355668,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dogthrowawaypiku,2020/04/02,"Urge to hurt a dog - becoming a monster. Why is this? I'll begin by saying I resonate strongly with [this guys thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/6gqxyo/i_want_to_hurt_my_girlfriends_dog_and_i_dont_know/). And [this guys thread](https://www.reddit.com/r/mentalhealth/comments/7713d5/extreme_urge_to_hurt_girlfriends_dog/), but to a lesser extent. 

Preface:

I have no mental issues to really speak of. I am a very isolated individual. I have a small circle of friends and have no desire to ever really be social. I spend most of my time on the internet, studying, lifting weights, and working.  I also have a dog of my own who I love and would never, ever harm. I've had several dogs before him all of which I've loved just as much. He's one of my best friends, easily.

The issue:

Throughout my life I have dated several women with small dogs. I won't go into details of them all, only the one I have now. But, know that the situation was similar for them in the past.

My girlfriend has a small raggedy old chihuahua dog. It's an old dog and has back issues, but its still fairly healthy. It acts very pompous and spoiled. It will snap at you if you don't give it food. It will snap at you if you pet it the wrong way. Well, at first the dog didn't mind me too much. But now I am filled with rage when I am around the thing. The fact it's so fucking ugly and acts like a spoiled brat... I started doing things to it, slowly. I'd pull the carpet out from under it so it'd hit the floor. I'd smack its head. Well, it started to yelp when it did that and I didn't want them hearing so I've started to ram my hand down its throat while I continued to fuck with it.

I'll spare you the details. But I fucking love every second of it. I don't know why. I feel like a freakin schizo writing this. But I have an image gallery of it on my phone that I stare at sometimes for an hour straight, just seething with rage and imagining all the torturous things I can do to it. It feels really really good. I've thought about pulling out its teeth and other things. 

I don't get intrusive thoughts or thoughts of violence aside from this one thing: the girlfriend's shitty small dog. 

**Do not comment ""you need to get help""** because I probably won't. Obviously I'm not alone, I found two threads exactly like my situation. The only thing that can prevent this is if somehow a connection can be made from my own insecurities to the thoughts of abuse I get. But I've tried. The whole ""do you see yourself as the dog"" thing. Nah. I don't know what it is at all. But that's why I'm making this thread. 

Please don't get mad at me. I don't want to stop, but I also *want to want to* stop.",2.819482758620687,5.121115078544062,3.5367724137931056,88.30046896551725,77.33333333333334,6.474850574712644,24.04153256704981,7.554174236665415,1.0530775785440616,2109,71,430,30,50,666,234,522,0.11800000000000001,0.726,0.156,0.9657,0,1,0,0,1,0,105.0,0,7,3,4,21,24,7,1,31,0,41,13,4,2,10,73,79,33,0,10,17,0,4,3,4,5,1,3,2,3,45,19,2,3,11,0,1,6,15,11,2,6,11,9,50,13,54,59,12,52,0,1,2,6,32,21,3,6,27,285,95,1,0.0,0.0900514838606243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07871649872587948,0.0,0.1215596251428484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06765905177151316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844184727767024,0.0,0.04633090702089722,0.08393967498356131,0.06467321147848748,0.0,0.07976077565842182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749867455106646,0.06403605932079147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768591055379723,0.05429677361796953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464836923932007,0.09190349358996562,0.08333369691678498,0.11743992406346468,0.21079148198718844,0.15883435198516715,0.0729092920800834,0.04319442761208903,0.06374796315835903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051043497109207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800131406243739,0.0,0.08566124429007987,0.0,0.05094341076467462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748479420579836,0.0,0.08136310595395002,0.0,0.0,0.2379831007646111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530828017023954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05368337937610541,0.1113941217857001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057878403065903,0.07191616135058411,0.05073279377723973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659345151927584,0.0,0.0767416681833439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174234298002178,0.05635548486204608,0.058618431399186315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595053591161481,0.0,0.15450541177716345,0.115607870921105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255375102102955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08342880143836147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194441354681771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947586438934248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0604408757240598,0.0,0.0,0.060564790936626436,0.0,0.0,0.1717241939252287,0.0,0.0,0.17086179009611738,0.0,0.07747579432977089,0.0,0.0,0.07516920836164655,0.0,0.16138658349063928,0.0,0.06069633457672331,0.12708432613908205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3534525133825543,0.0,0.0,0.2413525262490008,0.04431813617657143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051601252578887084,0.0,0.0742441816353407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542136652515226,0.1793148650815976,0.06032788289065305,0.0,0.09255154554596257,0.1366721909538803,0.0,0.2057434735337324,0.08485497164062862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05533130852409901,0.0,0.0,0.05399056458544257,0.08309767874752018,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hellohibye2,2020/04/02,"My ex-bf (20M) just broke up with me (21F) because he didn’t want to see me break down anymore. We had been together just under 7 years. He decided that he wanted to move out and break up with me at the same time. 

When I asked him why, he said he didn’t want to see my break down anymore. He is tired of what I make myself believe (I feel like I’m a bad person, and I’m not good enough). He said he didn’t want to deal with it anymore but that he still loves me. He also said he didn’t see himself with me or even settling down in the future. 

He really hurt me and I’m just so sad and upset. I could use any sort of advice or conversation. I feel so lonely.",0.8479908675799095,1.9843866986301395,2.9755479452054807,95.39953196347034,79.27397260273972,5.962557077625571,19.015981735159816,6.42735559955562,-0.2442949771689497,502,10,126,4,12,171,84,146,0.171,0.763,0.066,-0.9598,0,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,0,9,9,0,1,3,0,8,2,0,2,0,29,27,11,0,5,7,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,4,10,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,9,8,17,3,19,17,2,18,0,4,3,1,23,9,0,3,6,70,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407414405974447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151782769346884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979432453831661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4285080142485359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346457292179519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025646328383985,0.08779747441993728,0.0,0.0,0.1622690195877902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499377708736175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14848543166788045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488183105342798,0.0,0.09512842317383212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564867787642774,0.10289286136053047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080294828233527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15418379809608654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703642786703926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998991966710774,0.0,0.09613908836060817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530778240253989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12575875230900602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922673338101395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110077519916853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3443124271628604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502008540390155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0839832560486418,0.16553775882776614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439301685749933,0.0,0.0,0.33980323918578004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12996189452611254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274861521438947
mentalhealth,oakompath,2020/04/02,"How can I help my dad cope with the death of his friend? About two years ago my dad and his coworker/friend were road biking. A typical action taken by  cyclists is the head of the group will quickly look back and tell the rest of the group if there is oncoming traffic that they see. My dad was the lead and saw that there was an SUV coming towards them, so he turned and alerted his friend. However, his friend hit the end of my dads bike when he saw the suv around the bend, and fell and hit his head, and was hurt really, really bad. He was in the hospital for a few weeks, and recovered to the point of being able to walk and put together simple sentences. During that time, my dad took it really heavily, and he couldn’t shake the fact that it was an accident. He got back to normal as things went by, but A few days ago, we were told that his friend was put in hospice care. My dad reverted back to the quiet and mourning state that he was in before.Today, he told me his friend had passed away. From the way he described it, he said” it seemed like he had just given up, concerning the current circumstances(implying quarantine and corona). I don’t want to assume that he took his own life, but I think that is what my dad was trying to convey. He told me that if he seems moody that is why. How can I help him cope beyond” it was an accident, it wasn’t your fault”? I am worried about him, and I want to make sure that he recovers from this. He has never had problems with depression or suicidal thoughts, but I feel like the incident may be a trigger for that. What can I do?",6.142697768762679,5.330834470219436,6.3025299649640445,83.29854139775036,66.36677115987462,10.139111193066569,28.79605384473539,9.478462496947786,2.1003898580121705,1232,32,267,21,17,394,162,319,0.111,0.773,0.11699999999999999,-0.4747,2,1,0,0,0,0,37.0,1,1,2,1,15,17,0,1,23,0,31,3,2,5,3,45,58,24,3,7,7,7,1,2,5,2,1,2,0,0,22,18,0,0,6,2,0,12,4,8,0,1,28,7,31,9,31,23,4,39,0,3,4,0,50,11,0,7,16,174,53,1,0.10466876274347753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18556508564065988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317738990804952,0.0,0.0,0.09833974808247273,0.24145145319776226,0.08739404487366317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671677942433476,0.0,0.0,0.0901628710978704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750269293884675,0.0,0.09015105197831673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270545645600273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0529236713875351,0.07477538501774803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4852009587211119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08371317123940444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21484069502718103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403145306882522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205007532773464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393064254877968,0.1022717409060806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789539920300768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986721189753403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072700245231478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255316420603784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894581272654762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001538701203318,0.0,0.2104420325269005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011604688309552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956396227453797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834074523961561,0.1905730210357139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449063801373485,0.0,0.09864907018180152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148511210026528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953727506017929,0.06706751682661752,0.0,0.08309530600406816,0.06103319727961476,0.0,0.09921374848362556,0.3000464648480349,0.23258169334248505,0.07106321926478837,0.11384955747305947,0.1022461722343094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347269628047025,0.08308119193589186,0.08395896795037561,0.0,0.0,0.09702899169466488,0.09444727819138883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10629620930865202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740325150661337
mentalhealth,mellbell14,2020/04/02,"What’s wrong with me? It feels like I’m switching perspectives all the time. I don’t know how I actually feel about anything. It’s like whatever perspective I have at that moment determines how I react but it could be different at other times. I don’t trust myself anymore and sometimes I replay situations over and over and I start to question if it really happened the way I remember or if it was really said like that or if it even happened at all. I am truly scared of being close to anyone and I question every word I say to people. Sometimes I remember my conversations and as I play them repeatedly in my head the story starts to change and I become unclear of exactly what was said or what the intentions were when it was said. I’m constantly doubting myself and questioning my own judgement. To the point where I am seriously suffering in my work performance and relationships. I have no friendships, and no family... I have been diagnosed with BPD and Anxiety and PTSD. I just have never been able to put into words this feeling of switching “perspectives” all the time.. Can anyone else relate?",4.4797101449275365,6.793287526570051,5.711425120772947,74.59728260869569,72.28502415458938,9.430917874396137,29.374396135265695,9.861636050157227,3.3335004830917883,886,37,150,25,18,295,116,207,0.127,0.765,0.109,-0.4258,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,2,7,10,0,2,6,0,18,2,1,4,5,46,31,22,0,4,8,0,3,3,0,0,1,4,0,0,14,15,0,0,9,1,0,1,5,5,0,0,9,7,26,5,21,19,4,23,0,1,0,0,10,11,0,11,13,116,40,1,0.11690289200989973,0.0,0.11408035915675432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943039241028686,0.0,0.1159362561296724,0.1634824404418964,0.1197808278087724,0.09620111935220856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911005963116878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14723510010672833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366775897616428,0.0,0.0,0.12633049574946004,0.0,0.0933374467950062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11865397460350335,0.0,0.12213864063812352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976573656228076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721325763510581,0.0,0.09849572849872948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020564249598047,0.0,0.1773288442172775,0.08351544941017465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067536826532492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997609368731847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424677217389445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713385441286257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016271715272517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104574587283757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11051101930336099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665322486934406,0.11751969526538178,0.3928739806043314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497819721823445,0.0,0.0,0.1255099563326095,0.2648563755807556,0.0,0.3336042623829529,0.09296587186478454,0.11704018877631008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314037486582964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23123989879399884,0.0,0.16548893732098013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20450104931738086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279207429573397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510669768993104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278149606893897,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idekfam1997,2020/04/02,"What do I do if I can’t afford a therapist? I know I have depression, bpd, and ADD. I don’t take pills and I don’t go to therapy because I know for a fact I can’t afford it! I’m not suicidal like I used to be as a teen. I’m 22 and I just feel numb. I just push myself everyday. I sleep, go to work, eat, sleep, wake up, then go to work again. That’s it. I work at McDonald’s soon to be a manager but I want more. I want to go to college, I want to lose all this weight, I want to run marathons, i just want to become a better version than what I am. I don’t think I could ever be able to change myself if I’m not even receiving therapy or medicine. It sucks living a sad life.,",-0.7659139784946234,0.6825173548387156,2.4477419354838723,95.91827956989248,85.12903225806451,6.455913978494625,19.365591397849464,7.554174236665415,0.2997010752688172,510,14,135,9,15,184,80,155,0.125,0.7759999999999999,0.099,-0.7545,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,5,8,7,1,0,6,0,13,8,3,1,3,27,32,9,1,8,9,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,7,4,2,0,4,1,0,7,7,5,0,0,0,2,23,2,16,28,3,14,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,3,6,84,30,5,0.14492169505310884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834292018983317,0.1600546262668373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817146233784454,0.0,0.0,0.18252380169495128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330793743517773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570818111425492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482084359340267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14829107378016312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09571941279352043,0.13108997009915951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327676342857363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32944935608181936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929034714287865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236247905970686,0.07080141992537871,0.0,0.12796851182043004,0.0,0.0,0.16213030723048086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900527115361932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15852081264518722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896307895245604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3314611766883814,0.16826525779532975,0.0,0.09285997050845993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516581408541255,0.0,0.0,0.42739285266985017,0.0,0.0,0.17647558244272732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165141600231629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AlexologyEU,2020/04/02,"Getting back on my feet seems overwhelming. First day here, hope this is the right place. 

So what's happening, my wife had a nervous breakdown in January, her second. She suffered a psychotic break, schizophrenia, horrendous anxiety, the works. We got her the right meds, and the help she needed but we have a long road ahead. The entire process took about 2 months of essentially 24 hour care, every moment keeping an eye on her to help her get back on her feet and then adjusting to giving her more space as she was more and more capable. 
It was the worst month of our lives but in different ways. I will never really know how it felt for her but she also doesn't really know how sick she was. Allot of what happened she doesn't remember. 

In my own life, I have been doing night classes for a diploma in computer science and have pushed myself very hard and got great results. It was a great sign of my own recovery from depression and social anexity after attending therapy for about a year. I will return  to therapy after covid and fully expect that to be what really helps me, but in the meantime I throw myself atthe Oracle of internet wisdom. 


I had to defer 2 of my 3 modules since my wife was so  unwell. But one course was maintained  and I'm finding it very, very hard to get back to work on it. I also lost my job due to covid and am under lockdown, so I have all the time in the world. But all I seem to want to do is vegetate at home, play games, stay up late and close the world off. I've managed to do a few hours here and there but mostly from a sense of guilt when I see my wife sitting down to study something herself. 



So what can I do to get myself back on my feet?",5.473571428571423,5.537463023809526,6.063190476190474,81.51514285714288,67.57142857142857,9.577142857142855,29.002380952380953,9.3871,2.300269523809524,1320,41,267,24,20,430,184,336,0.09699999999999999,0.784,0.11900000000000001,0.8968,2,1,1,0,0,0,32.0,3,0,0,5,19,13,0,3,19,0,26,7,4,3,3,43,49,29,0,4,7,3,3,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,11,14,1,1,8,2,0,4,3,7,0,3,14,5,40,6,47,32,11,56,0,4,2,0,26,24,0,5,24,193,51,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16439500540997307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863060271765715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3161427254515238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479663629623673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06628812450196342,0.0,0.08852897413937942,0.0,0.0,0.10738893870028786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08660119102953824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869016949144792,0.0,0.09394405687144247,0.08742926772236119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21480466168932835,0.09860118811535984,0.0,0.0,0.1644138589433475,0.2266426856491113,0.0,0.0,0.18178570218652196,0.0,0.1841511828304245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20668480044471105,0.0,0.10310220637441526,0.10208916320834116,0.2024459655101441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10199871827321057,0.09136044786660978,0.0,0.0,0.11297641176661635,0.0,0.1159464864483505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260041673038753,0.0,0.0,0.0907614525544234,0.09096190590594004,0.0,0.0,0.1122024816902812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11417148512406655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16408476201149744,0.0,0.0,0.07621412313414637,0.07927449048702752,0.0,0.0,0.09645720010768608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965009414139682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10738893870028786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19754101091670467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643589994542765,0.17555645843174875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190671139352683,0.1871440618906147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08502520240325133,0.0,0.0,0.1047768419244255,0.0,0.07912927595043492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955563428677867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350882840917199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059935033757678675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419843841734828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544263303403457,0.060625532903167474,0.08158632130139144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965809171377314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619047230834632
mentalhealth,confused_circle,2020/04/02,"[19M] Help. Negative emotion drains my energy and motivation This is rather a recent phenomenon. I've most of my life been in control emotionally and fairly stoic to an ample extent. Until a few days ago I would be able to effortlessly brush off any heated argument and laugh at any insult. But lately, any interaction or confrontation that gives rise to negative emotions (verbal quarrels, snide comments, being roasted etc) seem to leave me drained. It's strange really, after an argument with someone not only do I get sad but I also feel like there's not one reason in the world I should continue on with my tasks of the day. You may say I lack a ""why"" but I assure that's not it. Even if I see definite reasons to accomplish my tasks I've lost all drive and energy to do so. ** It's like I'm wrapped inside a dense barrier of fatigue and sloth, with sadness and intense anxiety vibrating beneath the surface** . Not even fun things like gaming or sex interests me, all I do is lay on my bed and breathe away the hours (I'd probably even find a way to slack off from that if I could because at times even that feels like a chore).

I don't know what's happening.

I've been mildly depressed and actively suicidal for a year now. But this has only been going on for the last few days.",3.054171141520872,5.241671992031876,4.650150701541662,81.16065130781223,76.09163346613545,8.189918586523472,26.84929845834055,8.964715089967882,2.378465650441711,1014,40,191,24,23,340,156,251,0.175,0.682,0.142,-0.8022,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,0,4,9,15,2,0,14,0,16,4,1,4,3,43,27,19,1,7,13,0,2,4,0,3,2,1,2,0,11,11,0,2,8,1,0,3,7,7,0,1,4,5,18,8,29,17,8,31,0,5,1,1,8,13,0,7,18,127,29,2,0.1216170024523096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10780613472394132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725707292209924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481111962768593,0.0,0.09303667399564276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426317719085555,0.0,0.0,0.0741365958867223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640380955388465,0.09710128039261263,0.0,0.0,0.23529871637446495,0.0,0.10474854600503487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4104082756735041,0.0,0.0,0.13563510573705792,0.3213075324899324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229864212438906,0.17376642170431214,0.0,0.0,0.1111557369636418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06353986422466605,0.11666611061359428,0.06911774515856889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754551362225884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151731316739592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976824953594616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668375239884042,0.09913408900372177,0.1371892760299677,0.12877484548810295,0.0,0.0,0.08590168547412258,0.2376636971444827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13275932461060247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241082833444724,0.18499042127400034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13112369825945253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791096595227674,0.2500850676082595,0.12008211793715826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09671472169912748,0.0,0.0,0.09691300514810304,0.11071555141741056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030456915157519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330292614445809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079693243577342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091585214796811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653391574113936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097404283985566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639322917985523,0.0,0.0,0.07831736220923527
mentalhealth,xylophony98,2020/04/02,"Weird uncontrolable inner monologue. It happens most usually when I play video games for too long. I cannot explain it well enough since even I can't really comprehend what's happening and it's been happening for years. 

I know it's me thinking but i have no control over it. It feels like my brain is going on autopilot thinking to itself and explaining what I'm doing in a game. It doesn't feel relaxing it's more anxiety inducing and I can't really explain it beyond that.

I usually turn the game to silent and put on podcast to make it stop but recently it started popping up while I make music and I can't just turn on a podcast while trying to make a song.

I was wondering if anyone experiences the same thing as me or even knows what is going on inside my head. Any kind of help would be greatly appreciated.",2.646944444444447,5.014171765432104,4.529120370370372,80.6247916666667,78.25925925925925,8.247530864197532,26.79166666666667,9.017664075816787,2.5273444444444446,654,27,123,17,16,222,101,162,0.091,0.825,0.084,0.2007,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,0,1,5,0,13,2,2,5,0,29,35,13,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,17,5,0,2,11,7,0,3,6,2,1,0,2,3,14,6,16,31,4,22,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,4,11,87,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789000427055533,0.0,0.11012030756470724,0.0,0.0,0.10065222872051142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069427719487078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145062818749314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487374141702814,0.0,0.19015342434912072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080938122986056,0.0,0.0,0.1455695044977012,0.10283692967890087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16361864688750855,0.0,0.0,0.15870387220983925,0.0,0.0,0.38187989301430336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773282305020874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648573204866084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14990034621496445,0.1582208043854034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703260292488035,0.0,0.0,0.12739000731053446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882604839170893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14470813152829148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18443435614927425,0.0,0.14213190554168584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907579384858236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188758086141803,0.0,0.0,0.12034749985706435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563307315273263,0.1844729387886228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977316703960108,0.313149546018442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170781569756785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12942710545819627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15610614825806515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225697631064774,0.0,0.0,0.0926981978584217
mentalhealth,Beyonc4,2020/04/02,"Eating disorder I think I’m close to having an eating disorder/on the edge of an eating disorder. It’s creeping up on me. That’s all I had to say, byyyee",-0.03500000000000013,2.1723126969697013,3.718409090909091,83.09761363636366,88.6969696969697,6.936363636363637,20.37121212121212,8.07648339933343,1.457430303030303,121,4,24,3,4,45,23,33,0.17800000000000002,0.8220000000000001,0.0,-0.6597,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,5,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5781169376996593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7742319853090556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20057026160055708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16160819728791767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,n33dguid4n3,2020/04/02,How to talk to a therapist? I'm currently not visiting one right now but I might find a therapist one day. I have communication problems and being vulnerable to a stranger can be hard,2.8615714285714304,5.6811625142857185,5.3539285714285745,72.26232142857145,81.0,10.357142857142858,31.607142857142854,10.125756701596842,4.347142857142858,148,8,27,6,4,52,27,35,0.22399999999999998,0.7759999999999999,0.0,-0.7579,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,7,6,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,0,1,2,0,3,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,20,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809740722227487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25647789345204464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513767715699268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976891763472115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3803052586619206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685115650269697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396444870487793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22554847013335005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6516334901482629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jxsten,2020/04/02,"Sister is awfully depressed, and with a toxic boyfriend who's cheated multiple times. Mom isn't sure what to do with her.. My sister has been in and out of counselling and with therapists for years. She hasn't had one for the past few months now but she's just recently tried to kill herself because her boyfriend cheated again. She refuses to leave him. My mom doesn't know what to do anymore, any suggestions that I can give to my mom? We care so much about her and dont want to see her gone..",3.407196969696969,5.090138949494953,3.658472222222226,90.87437500000004,73.64646464646464,7.374242424242425,27.52651515151515,8.07648339933343,1.5904636363636362,392,15,83,6,8,121,68,99,0.183,0.777,0.04,-0.9226,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,0,5,6,3,0,2,1,11,0,0,0,1,15,17,6,1,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,3,1,14,2,15,14,2,10,0,1,1,0,19,2,0,0,7,58,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662260988789276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18466069443162653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350599328341955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898436466459465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16037407190184802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822540071289334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17862032386735172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20600307793230804,0.0,0.10233083213720792,0.0,0.0,0.1971592648977268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6542267303144391,0.14862332742837076,0.0,0.13687866747399471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12617416291548547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17774928456214786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838503630900456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14837755604835776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17549160799800673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21619293521324587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10857491015495717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12641780196518518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109825779270784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990690808732805
mentalhealth,throwaway03411,2020/04/02,"I'm (19F) Afraid My Ex (23M) Will Hurt Himself If I Cut Contact With Him. How Can I Convince Him It's Best To Move On And Let It Go? I dated my ex for about a year. We broke up about 3 weeks ago, and we haven't been handling it very well (I own up to my mistakes in this situation as well).

He was a really good boyfriend, I was head over heels for him, he treated me really well and is overall a wonderful person. A few months into our relationship, it came to light that he had depression. It wasn't so bad that I was concerned, but bad enough that I told him that he had to see a doctor and get on antidepressants.

When his depression kicked in, he was a completely diffent person. He had horrible mood swings, the smallest things could be the end of the world to him. When he was mad or sad, he said really hurtful things to me. I always respected his moment of being sad, but when he went back to being ""himself"", I made it very clear that I did not tolerate being treated that way, and that if he didn't seek help, I couldn't take that relationship any further.

Seeing the man who treated me like a princess suddenly treat me like a stranger, shutting me out and lashing out at me for things I didn't have anything to do with really got to me, and I couldn't stand that, it hurt me a lot.

But I was stupid, and I put up with that for a good 3-2 months.

About three weeks ago, I finally had enough of it when he snapped at me when I told him I couldn't see him because I had to study for college (I'm in med school, shit is real).

So, I broke up with him. I just couldn't take it anymore.

After that, the threats came. Threats of him hurting himself and doing something stupid.

I got legitimately terrified, I didn't sleep for a week. I was so scared he was going to hurt himself, I'd blame myself for the rest of my life. So, I made it very clear that we are not together anymore, but I still keep in contact with him.

This is hurting me so much. It's stopping me from getting over him and just letting him go. I'm far for being mature enough to handle this properly, can I please get some advice?",3.156730541580348,4.010095529816514,4.401583308671206,88.55584640426163,73.05963302752293,7.644155075466112,26.449837229949694,7.941651935203635,1.329339390352175,1625,54,364,22,31,536,187,436,0.201,0.693,0.106,-0.9946,0,0,1,0,0,1,60.0,4,0,0,1,21,39,7,2,17,0,42,6,4,3,2,51,68,29,0,8,11,2,0,2,0,1,2,1,0,3,30,23,0,2,1,0,0,8,11,24,3,1,29,5,65,14,53,26,10,53,0,12,3,0,48,21,1,6,24,255,95,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477898116033954,0.1356689315998873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367462104692496,0.0,0.0,0.052039371418962616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15178373708327456,0.0,0.0,0.06297324881071094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05884271561733735,0.12778973647189731,0.04664870316591803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030787625838813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17504757687638725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08023461688244128,0.0,0.0,0.061098688871373076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182110052953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783261997418331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777810700457497,0.23721119222276565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382898986256515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994287962512327,0.0,0.1304721294052741,0.12837045514627532,0.12240747189782646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853634604237295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05129284531271666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49152718420872205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680186057712951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15650323437906516,0.05405160810535781,0.07477213600653883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505850247611583,0.0,0.14481890726475566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850016108536984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12216245652201815,0.08133356934722827,0.05625440687345188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363670756449125,0.0,0.08400106201311902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692838773539606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710178043493381,0.19609454578308336,0.0,0.0,0.1643176246092906,0.0,0.0,0.07279244552391335,0.0,0.07661450280717491,0.07744700934459135,0.1829406633524951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855143131227595,0.0,0.08601688852104866,0.07657989352087702,0.0,0.0,0.058912397558503575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06111266705078164,0.06397801584619131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507399382259904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15251868822000345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14624512355764904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18942249808718511,0.0,0.06074168805555667,0.18415032290256644,0.0,0.20641449337375065,0.0709390971474062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298769512290895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04927935169856672
mentalhealth,dead-man-here,2020/04/02,"How do I handle escapism? My excessive escapism is killing me. I don’t do anything any more,just sit in front of my pc playing games or scrolling through social media. I can’t even take out 20 minutes for meditation. I don’t even have a normal conversation for days ,recently I have started smoking weed. I think i might also be addicted to porn. I basically reaching out for every bit of gratification I can get.

Fuck fuck fuck. 

I don’t think i can recover from this now. I don’t even have the will to think there is a future where i can be better again. :(",2.7478378378378387,4.788221126126128,4.472333333333335,82.7685,76.47747747747748,7.322882882882882,28.21711711711712,8.238735603445708,2.032631711711712,439,19,87,8,10,148,70,111,0.163,0.753,0.084,-0.8934,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,9,6,4,0,3,0,19,5,0,1,0,9,28,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,5,4,0,0,0,0,16,2,12,24,1,12,0,0,0,4,3,4,3,2,6,61,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20585838323054573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101154546200818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841450008202127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15539538707074926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700950416023974,0.20615927282785707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178316612302907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3741718642567529,0.0,0.15910191022662054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5237256601886638,0.09865866622059018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089183147579746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20032444410875688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18501853021272305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18645210746334268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19249383870486067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365861875665527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419806675814882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3629941645685647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ldennis98,2020/04/02,"Feeling so low today I don't know if it's the lockdown/self isolation finally getting to me or what. I felt really anxious earlier with no trigger, the covid numbers have been in the back of my head, i just feel so drained today, i keep crying over the littlest of things, my head feels foggy and to top it off i've started my period. Feeling like shit mentally and physically.",3.831261261261261,5.637461135135138,5.484864864864863,77.70585585585587,72.78378378378378,8.717117117117118,32.6036036036036,9.2995712137729,3.2603765765765766,300,15,54,7,6,102,57,74,0.239,0.672,0.08900000000000001,-0.9221,0,2,0,0,1,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,0,4,0,3,3,3,1,0,14,12,6,0,1,3,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,5,8,1,8,10,0,11,0,1,0,0,0,5,1,2,7,36,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319688324042769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15788907511137326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255496195802099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4152919064868287,0.1466905610861549,0.19715272032699271,0.22493322305167965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072784746677334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4214635884548976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825101823212023,0.0,0.0,0.11284612756947905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003157593452044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069282506165224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315421379828088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21420801292651329,0.0,0.21077227161343964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533637333339072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13641470241255055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3892650082395254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fluffypancakes16,2020/04/02,"People who use social interactions as a distraction from depression, how are you doing while social distancing? It's been almost 3 weeks now that I've been social distancing and my mental health is sliding downhill very quickly. 

My depression stems mostly from never truly feeling as if the people in my life care/love me and I used social interactions to prove to myself that the people around me care just enough that they remember to invite me.

More than ever, I feel alone and have felt more detached from reality and myself. Work is light since I'm working from home but that just gives me more time to think. I thought about taking an online class just so I could be distracted during the day.

How are you doing with your mental health battles during this time?

Any tips on how to keep working through depression when you're self-isolating/social-distancing?",7.479999999999998,8.605454611464971,6.917713375796177,73.42943630573252,63.39490445859872,9.592101910828026,30.349681528662423,9.642632912329526,2.919594140127389,702,23,112,13,10,218,101,157,0.156,0.823,0.021,-0.9605,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,3,1,3,13,7,1,2,5,0,11,3,0,5,3,29,23,14,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,7,6,0,1,7,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,4,4,17,1,18,17,5,14,0,3,0,0,12,3,0,3,10,82,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423043952204155,0.11814812951445028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757545856759034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155165106317833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23261576992832225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910802470866928,0.0,0.0,0.07356945634467099,0.0,0.29475996856688874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178707999493658,0.0,0.0,0.1031880957097482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11536030822569718,0.0,0.10953066134544512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943190592714383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425144905213167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442733261637435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013958160900005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057511400994552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299231590970909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798229261952739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23725739709707694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12922564821899427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11900594261352612,0.0,0.0,0.09436468392189218,0.0,0.0,0.5814295815280759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577080772289362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309516904446066,0.0,0.09056344601024464,0.13303703740845224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970497360502016,0.0,0.0941244853108618,0.0,0.0,0.09150472904784113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491456319141391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rga00976424,2020/04/02,"I don’t how know concerning/common this behaviour of mine is... I don’t know what it is or what happened to make me like this (maybe it stems from my dad having an affair on my mom?) .. 

I have somewhat obsessive/stalker behaviour of new guys I date. I made a fake social media account and if I see he befriends or follows another girl, I add that girl to see who she is and if they interact (like if he likes/comments on her posts)... I’ve done this for years, even with my last long term relationship with my boyfriend of 5 years. I don’t know why I feel the need to do this!!! Jealousy? Insecurity? I check these accounts multiple times a day and right after doing so get a sense of relief or calm.. until a few hours later I feel the need to do it again. 

I don’t know if it’s severe trust issues that I have, or what it is... I don’t like feeling this way, and maybe I’m not the only one who does it, but I’d like to stop.",2.6110549450549456,3.3932100358974395,4.304706959706959,89.00826923076927,74.28205128205127,7.417582417582418,24.18498168498169,7.7094869923839395,0.9438058608058616,707,20,163,9,14,239,112,195,0.057999999999999996,0.865,0.077,0.5029,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,1,0,4,9,0,1,8,0,16,0,0,3,0,31,33,16,0,6,10,2,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,19,7,0,1,7,0,3,1,6,2,0,1,2,5,23,7,17,31,3,21,0,0,2,0,16,3,0,9,19,104,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15995404154515974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837724984120302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334909111878607,0.15610387068242693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075283841323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313901127169261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796971253479959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15104099147510225,0.13489276982811824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150223569289135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592146684080293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353333276520094,0.12434244255942173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2980981104243385,0.0,0.0,0.13499525307999338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433933853904451,0.10182325861841986,0.0,0.3064987543294344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786558540351737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262165625993552,0.0,0.14732643245851454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103366700510716,0.1160153942123887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14609348430495908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16377348575798928,0.0,0.13027040440603635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431131389210939,0.0,0.0,0.17232952994728212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549780044336806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127532304485592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894871946551225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108108314414473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13764581943232035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964646512571809
mentalhealth,AliSyyed,2020/04/02,"What should I do if my friend wants my help but I myself am broken?? I have a question that I'd like someone to help me with.

There is a friend of mine that needs my help because he's in a state of mind that is fragile..and I myself have a lot more mental problems of my own that are in my opinion too much for me to handle that I can't even describe here..So he wants my help but for me to properly advice him I'd have to tell him about myself and I absolutely definitely don't wanna do that..Sometimes I think I don't even wanna help him..Am I being selfish here?

 I don't think I am capable of helping anyone if I can't even help myself.I have nothing else left to give. And even if I could help I am not sure I wanna..and lets say I do help him,I really don't want to tell him anything about my own problems..

I am conflicted..Am I being a bad friend or a bad person??? Is it morally wrong for me to think this way?? what should I do?? maybe try helping him as best as I could without mentioning anything about myself,right??",1.329002143367468,2.8069933981900483,3.3626053822338666,91.67148130507263,78.81900452488688,5.919599904739224,22.03881876637295,6.5966054737557815,0.35437013574660625,795,23,181,7,19,270,96,221,0.136,0.628,0.23600000000000002,0.9753,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,1,10,12,0,0,6,0,29,0,0,0,1,31,37,10,0,15,8,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,0,1,9,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,0,1,39,6,25,30,6,5,1,0,0,0,26,3,0,7,1,130,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971193829213259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694933841208787,0.0,0.1635733188697431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16596722979173,0.06058511623526765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430004882272244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870414034570926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08302470654480938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26257550633850985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303573977141262,0.0,0.0,0.09534063154236501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6661670709806509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798377350463484,0.1016294773761092,0.0,0.048555246380623016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449488768398772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984714435549584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001582628430442,0.0,0.10035207998149384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306054719360708,0.07369386486049004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536407177603816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867804988307636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19019900498736875,0.0,0.0,0.11133567768883802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366956658534753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848755676181174,0.0,0.07903617081038138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420989827432145,0.0,0.098295835733354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367064382516943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737364444501478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19104865771143106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747694112630255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17586228031505868,0.07888841449853942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095805084147843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866358656714133,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Score1ForTheRepublic,2020/04/02,"I feel like a part of me has died. And not in a disassociative way. I wont go into full details, but within thhe last month it became evident that I was truly alone.  As in, if I were to try to end my own life, there is nobody in my personal life who would 1) be affected 2) truly care.  I dont want to die, let me be clear.  But nothing has changed, it became real when some stuff happened.  And I am... a very unique person.  Love and understanding. Well, was. Maybe.   I would say my ability to love and understand is in no way compromised, but I am a shell of what I was.  I feel if anyone of my ""friends"" came to me and needed help, despite their never going to return or show it back, I would in no way differ in my response. However, I dont carry happiness or emotion anymore.  I eat less, I talk less, I dont reach out to anyone.  I get asked if Im using meth all the time, if that means anything.  

I feel as though a part of my soul is missing, but memories and beliefs and sanity remain fine.  I dont feel sad, I feel like a chunk of me broke off, but it doesnt come back.  I feel this differs from most dissassociation in that I dont feel ""apart"" from myself more less I recognize there is just no longer a piece of me.  It doesnt scare me.  But I was wondering if I could be pointed the path of what disorder or something I might be on or near.  I dont have the money or time for ""help"". This lockdown isnt changing my life either, its unchanged pretty much.  I am a very introspective person, and I want to learn more about it. I have dealt with anxiety, depression, etc for years but this is new.  In the past, feelings of this were smaller, temporary, and you could feel the temporary.  They made me sad. This does not make me sad, more curious.",1.654918175487467,3.3779385403899767,3.642137012534821,88.9320913126741,78.63788300835654,6.938753481894151,22.639362813370475,7.865858978985527,0.9807750000000004,1332,41,295,22,32,452,179,359,0.1,0.7170000000000001,0.182,0.9887,1,2,2,0,0,1,62.0,0,1,2,0,9,16,0,1,13,0,39,6,0,4,3,69,69,30,2,13,21,0,9,2,1,5,3,1,0,3,19,14,1,0,15,1,1,4,16,7,1,0,8,10,48,9,38,49,17,37,2,6,0,2,15,17,0,14,15,214,67,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775539760764713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05743241993780595,0.0,0.07445455139577885,0.10498882895247523,0.0,0.061780597582254425,0.0,0.07018529665444438,0.0,0.0,0.1154565852280892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586617420085695,0.07654429974861976,0.0,0.1588394834208389,0.06467074689416473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988307991896513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646622694435261,0.0,0.15583267386172744,0.15687547623808934,0.08604282937231819,0.0,0.06569892489370904,0.0,0.5279263471824075,0.0,0.0,0.07682080246211001,0.0,0.08444963841368414,0.0664944565004626,0.0,0.08372883526945786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3416430714554589,0.10726765772902982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05800301168352402,0.0,0.039223759924103714,0.0,0.08533407729702577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638886404161302,0.07991908199143861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064281881467052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109423653628656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06119641196632016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07676960873145966,0.15908377186010075,0.0733560254906185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13551682815212465,0.07103808999055422,0.05011336398018849,0.0,0.07542325713983164,0.08177904057802744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796430582700453,0.0,0.0,0.05992441003585925,0.0,0.05518900388518644,0.05566740395910786,0.05790272070474886,0.07250821898525063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203680139170235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16259852698051644,0.07166789491250149,0.0,0.1966586401729757,0.0,0.0,0.07097045084256552,0.0,0.0,0.07637859798933015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545215861299592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05970291361718781,0.07516349968098683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057796654847965236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08594328820892651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060342704326603686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07376112794987782,0.0,0.08755405424317317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05097121920140592,0.0,0.0,0.15631212690427174,0.0,0.0648409781772779,0.0,0.12389001518752067,0.0885627464194956,0.17877390116113395,0.0,0.0,0.06750173547819029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141599001948291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999407561386814,0.0,0.0,0.0483460493765363
mentalhealth,Sleepy-Dwarf,2020/04/02,"No real answers given to me While I understand that it isn’t everything and it isn’t the important part, how many people are being treated with a proper diagnosis? I’ve seen several different psychologists and now a new psychiatrist and I feel like they are treating me but not looking at the big picture and explaining things to me to tell me what’s going on.",10.070434782608695,7.880855463768121,10.652463768115947,59.655217391304376,59.57971014492753,14.417391304347825,43.28985507246377,13.023866798666859,5.803933333333332,293,14,49,9,3,101,53,69,0.025,0.924,0.05,0.1406,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,1,0,13,12,7,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,3,7,3,6,9,1,7,0,0,2,0,3,3,0,0,4,38,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29661560719837965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255151471854211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354862781750688,0.20281858065409286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16134720199195265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869944853290364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.238404925740572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28783055660272666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741928810917774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30743658579681776,0.0,0.1968208668225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231409334488691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207267665749154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481415586526549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886108834733695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955504425931644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notcoolnamen,2020/04/02,"Books that teach to control your emotions? I realized by thriving in quarantine, that much of my discomfort in life is based on my encounter with others, and my relationship with them.

I feel everything, and sometimes even feel what others feel (thanks quarantine, I thought I had no empathy, happens to be subconscious) which makes me upset. 

I was a very shy kid, and being more open about who I am in recent years made me an emotional wreck who feels like everything is a catastrophe, *do you have any suggestions on books/videos/anything to ""calm down"" my reactions to daily struggles?* 

At the moment I'm reading ""Feeling Good"" by David Burns and it's helping me recognise the thought patterns that bring me to despair over little things. 

Example: I thought my nails were ill (which are from psoriasis in the hands) , so I was about to break down crying when I realized it was only the trasparent nailpolish getting off.",6.425909090909091,8.239457363636362,5.934924242424245,77.00238636363638,66.27272727272727,9.37878787878788,35.56818181818181,9.725611199111238,3.7123636363636354,735,36,122,16,12,226,112,165,0.14800000000000002,0.777,0.075,-0.9294,1,2,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,1,1,5,8,0,3,7,0,13,3,1,3,0,20,28,6,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,13,7,0,1,10,2,0,1,1,4,0,0,9,6,21,4,25,17,2,19,0,1,0,0,9,13,0,0,5,89,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903234790752356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194089371138198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17982776886773472,0.0,0.0,0.17611893387676747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3607074454425485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589883243920037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881950074675048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4053474350468821,0.1145423578029623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376768988381296,0.0,0.0,0.13448021896605425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417824753551731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746823420055823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324836521290126,0.07833089951469795,0.16069639105123765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171153157630693,0.10702392481112953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11786364620312433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219409297599724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16037699124701496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15831008987341272,0.1721382861208969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585740327870171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16761549369635914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761363986458975,0.0,0.0,0.10651852128471916,0.0,0.0,0.3818609133128044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229201371834384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324958339326626
mentalhealth,st3f4nkk,2020/04/02,"I conciously (sry for bad english) block my emotions So let me tell you something about me.. As a child when i was around 6 - 11 years old i couldn't manage to talk while i was in school, was sitting on the school desk the whole day and was really shy, barelly had any friends and loved playing on my pc and listening to music. I was raised in a neighbourhood where there weren't many kids to play with and if there were, they were much older or much younger, so me and my sister were playing together most of the time (i had two to three friends that i was very comfortable with). So while i was in school many older kids were bullying me because at the time i was 10-11 years old and was short and a little obese, so from then i believed that if i act tough, kids would stop bullying me and as a result i became really easily frustrated about anything. After a year or two i realised that the angrier i looked adding to my shortness i was looking kinda cute and not as somebody that people would fear. At that time i couldn't explain how but i got a lot taller and lost all of my obesity and people started telling me that i was too skinny, still some a little older kids bullied me a bit, but when i became 14 years old everybody started treating me different and many people told me that i changed completely.. however i changed physically but in my mind i was still easily frustrated,  but i can't explain i tried to put that inside me because i felt like i looked like a complete asshole so i started numbing my feelings, that was when i was 14 and now im 15 years old i tend to still numb myself a bit,  but for the most i can feel and show emotions, i just feel like i'm numbing them from time to time, like i can't manage to chill out and i think that my childhood has something to do with this, but i don't know.. Any opinions? Also i feel totaly free around my classmates now, still a bit awkward and shy but when compared to the time i was really young, now i trully feel confident in my looks, height and weight.",6.627888655462186,5.576035115196085,6.7371428571428575,81.36500000000002,65.49509803921569,9.928291316526613,33.399159663865554,8.976282227363876,2.591986554621849,1589,57,329,22,21,510,180,408,0.11699999999999999,0.779,0.10400000000000001,-0.6305,2,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,2,1,27,24,2,2,18,0,33,8,1,2,1,62,57,45,0,6,13,1,7,4,2,2,5,1,0,5,11,23,4,2,10,4,1,2,7,10,0,3,26,12,61,15,38,26,11,62,0,1,4,1,19,19,0,10,44,227,72,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06030365064464559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255988211975806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205425621620099,0.13425799285519954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296242609829546,0.09193588176187677,0.0,0.0,0.08495885272897467,0.0,0.0,0.24697760812386976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15954306670994275,0.0,0.15812744514413204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04863184123977855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878517995521236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696474202118605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485482436572674,0.19064243755997248,0.053871401191665766,0.07240338583561486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651987482084684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06031056652926869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08145344539570093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0414421961863712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710966154862596,0.0,0.14736191551842553,0.1511570028489521,0.0,0.0,0.25329449322088954,0.0,0.08231660372453731,0.0641090789809874,0.0680585515910767,0.0,0.0,0.22935524950366104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07614045769847369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108669297945402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31651152068906563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15683497801766638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580574248568181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449246475658245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289503869568673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610533302465653,0.0,0.0,0.16012224680877116,0.0,0.2408833065369539,0.06304436030380663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606099937779994,0.13181961352250174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483183216647825,0.0,0.0,0.2638256310586549,0.0,0.0,0.07205545639621473,0.0,0.05119699743540044,0.0,0.14732507397826902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221939448578333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09182647713279962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419019981781878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713518213112884,0.0,0.0,0.24280099679016506
mentalhealth,Jach5044,2020/04/02,I'm think I have something wrong Ok so I'm pretty sure I have coronavirus but this I don't think has anything to do with it (I'm 14 almost 15 so I should be fine) but starting like a hour ago I have been having this strange gut feeling that something is very wrong with me or like I'm going to die soon or something it's hard to tell what it means but I have heard stories where they have a strange feeling and they die soon so idk but it's just a scary feeling and if anyone else has had this tell me about it and if you figured out why please explain why it was and why I might be having it,-0.1406666666666645,1.95274267692308,1.3146153846153863,101.07371794871796,87.61538461538461,3.774358974358975,19.43589743589744,4.604124745555138,-0.6975487179487181,468,14,112,1,15,149,70,130,0.20600000000000002,0.654,0.14,-0.9263,0,0,3,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,2,0,8,7,0,0,3,1,19,1,1,0,1,28,33,15,2,3,9,0,4,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,12,7,0,0,8,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,4,5,12,5,7,25,0,8,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,6,7,72,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498406814813707,0.0,0.15248307517699244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064753788401914,0.15602542981689335,0.1253107134954641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3160782561470078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272076068000604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309869587986545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865423331113818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640997404914754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14996183286546266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878936515921964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587392037060286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16154146847629142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671540410259141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549201041165605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516900292364562,0.0,0.0,0.1077822012412066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351894664017467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661930193095834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19514546565901664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564418932208055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4122179921436375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3329812382066511,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kono-Mai,2020/04/02,"fmt cures 18yr bipolar havent seen this posted in this subreddit and it looks extremely promising. has anyone tried fmt here? i reckon fmt will be a first line treatment and even possible cure in many mental illnesses in the future. it really looks like it help out a lot of people. a lot of hope

https://youtu.be/GMjy5yEhZ5Q",4.23268472906404,7.493153844827589,4.120738916256162,80.27672413793105,79.51724137931033,7.452216748768473,22.07881773399015,8.418075326091056,1.8767507389162563,265,8,43,6,7,81,45,58,0.051,0.767,0.182,0.8004,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,4,0,4,2,0,0,0,7,8,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,1,3,6,5,2,7,0,0,3,0,1,4,0,3,3,27,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18287889550587616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727485256098494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224707128029915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17530862787084198,0.0,0.0,0.25977398072855795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277780603353318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4392651781638827,0.0,0.0,0.4447137502661411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651663767733756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635766370603331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18132291701312367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2948535768546382,0.2504885660032521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755292840844555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17757242104987314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tdrunk,2020/04/02,"[Documentary] ‘Bedlam’, dir. Kenneth Paul Rosenberg, 2019 ""An unflinching look at the mental illness health crisis that is ravaging the United States in a documentary made by a practicing psychiatrist who has encountered mental illness in his private life""

WHAT IT’S ABOUT: During Kennedy’s term as president, the American mental health institutions, notorious for harsh conditions, were dismantled, to be replaced by a holistic, community-based approach, and their patients let to roam free. Then, starting with Raegan, came decades of neoliberal rule, which restricted funding to mental health programs further, and saw the mentally ill kicked further to the curb. Today, severe mental health issues can be a death sentence, especially if the person in question doesn’t have the vast means to afford comprehensive healthcare. Those with caring families and those left to their own devices alike are under constant threat because medical help is rarely available. Unlike the physically manifested illnesses, their diseases remain less understood and considered shameful. “Bedlam” is narrated by Dr. Kenneth Paul Rosenberg, a psychiatrist who has experienced policy failures regarding mental health in his own family. Through his own story, as well as three other examples—a homeless and disabled middle-aged man with a manic disorder, a young woman with bipolar disorder who had to drop out of college and a man with schizophrenia who has just been released from prison—Dr. Rosenberg explores the absolute catastrophe of the country’s mental healthcare and makes an urgent plea for change.

From here:

[https://supamodu.com/2020/north-america/bedlam-kenneth-paul-rosenberg/](https://supamodu.com/2020/north-america/bedlam-kenneth-paul-rosenberg/)",14.072808398950135,16.203186385826776,10.804551181102363,47.75947769028871,49.314960629921245,12.600104986876644,46.460892388451434,12.10132525352546,6.6478281364829375,1458,75,152,37,15,426,170,254,0.183,0.75,0.068,-0.9869,1,0,0,0,0,0,64.0,0,0,3,0,4,5,1,1,20,0,16,13,0,2,0,24,25,12,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,13,0,0,4,11,14,0,2,4,0,2,3,1,2,1,1,7,3,6,4,34,15,5,22,0,0,2,0,16,11,0,2,6,104,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05540082450005801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394479832801044,0.09266025736651087,0.0,0.09614110692810904,0.0,0.0,0.09821115706051406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20831729443904276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17135092520483294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4830165881216432,0.0,0.0,0.06091628980920066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09485719754700744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987435604076936,0.09293300384672552,0.0641926452690469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631799193544371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859947471329347,0.060664441626035424,0.0,0.0,0.09899714246563472,0.0,0.09155405511069817,0.732701453664039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07935465811571672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180864085961408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026707930170076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432674833810985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614551074704464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08171383372290937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoseContra,2020/04/02,"HEY Let’s BE FRIENDS HEY I know that everyone is going through a hard time right now, and i am currently under quarantine just like almost everyone else.

If you’d like to be friends and chat i have plenty of ways to do so! I can chat on here, on discord, on any where you’d like.

I have been diagnosed with PTSD, major depression disorder, and adhd. 

I don’t have any professional wisdom or credibility, i just want to be a friend!",1.8591731266149871,4.2120345813953515,3.915736434108529,84.00820413436693,81.09302325581395,8.00826873385013,24.671834625323,8.841846274778883,2.084665633074936,338,13,69,9,9,115,58,86,0.111,0.6459999999999999,0.243,0.9084,1,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,0,6,8,0,0,2,0,15,1,0,0,0,11,18,6,0,2,4,0,1,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,9,7,10,11,1,11,0,1,0,0,9,6,0,3,6,46,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396929452614513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997143689591393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712575355459907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17178083577682748,0.20243147449325333,0.0,0.0,0.22858011742208634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16660988040402314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3811546019886339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4622698481038115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334862853158878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786626604646852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960921339595456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20394501559627048,0.0,0.29231481070387144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233139377732591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032409698968345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629740761478775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763724602891534,0.158309373822007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anbcomm,2020/04/02,"Coronavirus - Stages Of Grief The coronavirus and efforts to manage it worldwide have created tremendous grief for me. I lost 13 people last year and went to 11 funerals (of those, my husband and I either ran or helped run 7 of those funerals). A grief counselor told me that ""grief compounds"" when you have a lot of it at one time - and I agree. I wanted to share my experience here to help others: I've written an article about the stages of grief: [https://astrologeranne.com/893/coronavirus-stages-of-grief-covid-19/](https://astrologeranne.com/893/coronavirus-stages-of-grief-covid-19/)   


I hope others find this article helpful in making sense of this challenging time. We're all grieving, all at different stages - and the stages aren't linear. I find myself bouncing around from one stage to another, depending on various triggers and even whether it's sunny or cloudy outside. I'm going more gently these days because I must. I wish everyone else the same gentleness as they make their way through this time in human history.",11.026545454545458,12.62489810909091,8.151666666666667,66.00750000000002,55.787878787878796,10.721212121212124,35.89393939393939,10.577609850970193,3.9750121212121208,848,32,122,17,10,242,111,165,0.134,0.7240000000000001,0.142,-0.1424,1,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,1,2,3,5,10,0,0,7,0,4,0,0,4,3,25,16,11,8,4,4,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,12,7,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,7,0,2,5,0,16,3,22,10,7,23,1,7,0,0,10,6,0,5,7,82,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19242383314740752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633607668433335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186459610815333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11834729104734712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917264982093776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532971436180331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120511104735973,0.0,0.0,0.17534947993490949,0.0,0.17950575170437816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33544544288332745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042916599230358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3690040473624889,0.0,0.0,0.1822645609869353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14958327522746667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20032034178974287,0.1560116918364662,0.0,0.0,0.2449856413460413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486991455787188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722113959827505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32101446242497683,0.0,0.0,0.17534947993490949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082376012490618,0.1456598777696925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17011348466530252,0.0,0.0,0.21102480889054834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181729480158276
mentalhealth,hesitantjoyrider,2020/04/02,Why do people mainly think of boys when talking about mental disorders? I realised that when people talk about mental disorders like adhd or autism etc. they seem to subconsciously refer to the hypothetical person as a boy. I know this could be a cultural thing but why is it a thing for people to steer disorders more towards boys?,5.686499999999999,8.094921316666671,6.200000000000002,71.985,69.16666666666666,8.8,27.0,9.3871,2.7229,269,9,42,6,5,87,45,60,0.0,0.9620000000000001,0.038,0.2755,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,7,7,5,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,9,5,3,3,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,2,3,32,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20707175809927256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756795571157962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5924140161426167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921606403491932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469186711783002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841773373915002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34727682433303764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583544856331866,0.15044617983845862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568559344674945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.276977284264981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289376366205279,0.11040322462309116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109488635507417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,serious__black_,2020/04/02,Breaking the stigma. “Breaking the stigma around mental health.” by Serious black https://link.medium.com/PInQam6dm5,16.967435897435898,22.600985230769233,8.792307692307695,39.744358974359,81.30769230769229,7.887179487179487,35.1025641025641,7.793537801064563,5.307994871794873,100,4,6,2,3,25,10,13,0.098,0.902,0.0,-0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5193644488418188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6201445441167607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5879466928909874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BeYourOwnDensity,2020/04/02,"Sertraline/Zoloft interaction with Nytol So I've been on a dose of 100mg of Sertraline for one and a half years. And recently, thanks to stress about the whole coronavirus situation, I've been struggling to sleep. Even though I'm currently working from home, I'm constantly tired and this isn't very good for my productivity. I want to start taking Nytol to help me sleep, but I don't know if it is safe to take with the medication that I'm on. Does anybody know if it is?",5.343546099290776,5.955153425531917,6.211489361702127,78.43333333333334,67.93617021276596,10.521985815602838,29.49645390070922,10.504223727775694,2.883296453900709,378,13,78,10,6,125,63,94,0.085,0.8170000000000001,0.098,0.3046,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,2,4,0,6,5,2,0,0,12,16,8,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,4,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,2,0,4,3,15,14,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,5,45,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162316917278916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510454914104867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216091034244068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678302560305233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411951140249642,0.0,0.2007116756583411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21993404130652286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20157473767401785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355896017793659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19756974758032375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22491524871492904,0.4004791638934036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162832444722476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292082331362467,0.2091828183953462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.300893189537967,0.0,0.0,0.1842206620612736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19659239591354888,0.0,0.0,0.2299798543149095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16509939308432842,0.11802125991839275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22339900618522104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567159821302836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288546683606368
mentalhealth,ThatDudeWithZapZapps,2020/04/02,"as stupid as this sounds, i need help destroying my positivity basically, i was suicidal a while ago and someone talked about how its a good idea to work on getting a positive mindset, i realized that was true and when i woke up the next morning i had one, the issue though, is that how it did it was by giving me an emotion that makes my mood positive, only thing is is that emotion fucks everything up, ill list why:

1) i cant stand the emotion itself, 2) its stopping me from feeling anything else, im too positive to feel happy from anything else cause my mind thinks im happy already but im too positive to let me cover this emotion with bad emotions, i assume this is because of my numbed emotions but, 3) this isnt the type of emotion that just goes away easily, nothing works, venting, openly expressing how much i want to kill myself, triggering my trypophobia with the worst things i know about, none of that works

im just scared im never gonna be able to be happy with this happening, i cant feel happy, i cant even feel bad, i cant enjoy being alive more than just a neutral feeling, i dont even enjoy being positive, its not a me thing to do, it makes me feel uncomfortable, very uncomfortable, i want to crawl out of my skin leaving my emotions behind",5.098095238095237,5.606715119047622,6.192182539682541,78.72017857142858,68.44444444444444,9.157142857142855,31.62301587301588,9.188382445141503,2.694868253968255,998,40,193,18,16,334,133,252,0.195,0.634,0.171,-0.9154,0,0,0,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,0,3,14,18,4,1,11,0,21,4,1,7,2,38,40,12,2,3,6,0,7,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,21,7,0,1,11,0,0,0,9,9,0,1,6,8,27,8,28,28,4,13,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,1,6,132,48,4,0.07256766015599851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432685224622714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08008021749132685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194340022860434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817970549785721,0.0,0.12118193015413813,0.04423657208242672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454697666218765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850487572470987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212419367631361,0.6530308026837598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586051026226827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652191337584728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220154336334565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708763247452347,0.03791360731178989,0.06961351205847502,0.0,0.06086631038953535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417134221757148,0.30899849450487177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048640572941940234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192005535016979,0.3919276282074109,0.07574178353285684,0.0,0.0,0.08028536416927233,0.0,0.03988128821347056,0.0,0.0,0.07683867416224423,0.0,0.07420534911890722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687895330249006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07327265004302573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05334557995665221,0.053808000504189823,0.05596865316664968,0.0,0.0771765298380595,0.0,0.0,0.06963062708029798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04917372458751082,0.05519097557264172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265288734682405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061486342959219474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060669813255139475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937724200281418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058327136419280314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446321866947568,0.04649842647427278,0.0712973576571334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05987591952887821,0.08560457224650189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548102611329333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15849036261068414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Perk8one,2020/04/02,"Who are dopamine and serotonin killers? Those two neurotransmitters are the most important for good mental health. Who are their killers? Junk food, fap, porn, late fall asleep, reading bad news, spend time with toxic people,...? Who are they?",5.5369230769230775,9.202148333333334,2.580205128205129,90.45646153846157,78.48717948717949,5.171282051282052,25.748717948717946,6.742157984588678,1.0663394871794871,191,7,32,2,5,50,33,39,0.25,0.65,0.1,-0.8690000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,4,1,0,0,4,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,2,4,1,3,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,2,16,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774543699323576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4018152206939836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787152140216865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35321649670630123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3748458343309808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3348775266720877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23037311142422665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323872297594121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19376523103665105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3246061826784118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SecretlyFallingApart,2020/04/02,"Anyone else's mental health really taking a beating right now with this self isolation? I really don't know how I'm going to cope with 6 more months of this I suffered with anxiety and depression before this but now it feels like it's increased ten fold. My kids constantly want and need my attention, I hardly sleep at night, I'm just a lack luster sack of potatoes slumped on my couch not useful to anyone right now. And I'm trying to constantly hide back tears from my eldest and trying to stop my mind from going to the darkest of places.",6.678816199376946,6.4991152149532745,6.914532710280375,77.2519236760125,65.07476635514018,10.12398753894081,29.048286604361373,9.725611199111238,2.532621183800623,436,12,81,8,6,141,71,107,0.23800000000000002,0.698,0.063,-0.9536,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,0,3,0,1,2,1,2,0,20,12,6,0,3,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,5,7,0,1,3,0,0,3,2,2,0,1,0,2,8,1,15,12,3,17,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,0,10,47,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361025792988013,0.0,0.0,0.24880112022907086,0.1822923860216037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680373440289975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15139043781502926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845204264947408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15323577979316072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14862306862986924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995790816214227,0.12710072906619446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022235530870124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15937465883443944,0.0,0.0,0.18911267317024796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777605989218137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691906319804643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929395949549295,0.0,0.17964091281900635,0.0,0.14200806404590774,0.0,0.0,0.131919868079867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669588337474192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18588070089901415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22795061272853698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30387261421510475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856015439111325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17804099120717068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14874282051095652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376806221830287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24158182471950196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536592813560965,0.0,0.0,0.10493740495814033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymous_automobile,2020/04/02,"I cannot let go of things after an argument I hang onto little things for way too long. I've been doing it since I was little. It would usually start with a fight, then we would resolve it, but I was never 100% happy with the outcome. There was always some little aspect that would irritate me. For example, maybe the loved one I was fighting with said something rude and despite me being right, I couldn't let go of the rude comment. Maybe I'm in the wrong but the loved one was giving me attitude the whole time because they knew that they were right. Stuff like that, it doesn't matter wether I'm right or wrong. It irritates me that I do this and I do not know what to do.

If this isn't the right subreddit, please direct me to another. Thank you for your time.",2.7941836228287817,4.516330264516132,3.6767741935483897,89.93823821339953,75.38709677419354,6.833746898263028,21.60049627791563,7.61054688173877,0.7142158808933003,601,15,126,8,13,192,92,155,0.195,0.667,0.138,-0.8558,0,0,1,0,3,0,17.0,1,2,2,1,2,12,4,0,9,0,21,2,0,0,1,21,33,7,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,15,6,0,0,3,0,0,3,6,6,0,2,9,1,18,6,13,17,2,21,0,0,0,2,12,9,0,3,9,91,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480215220237946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320716519383821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07677916898218054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082463342370965,0.14316284614161756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340782440184471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692199242125617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25758890308074395,0.0,0.06153378417815285,0.3787109725440911,0.0,0.111463554817907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273531915135485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25307142233049545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714194560962268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17069666711754772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13825747121090345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4302492726632061,0.11980919288641766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104188794359459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969640015758138,0.0,0.0,0.08914947250867658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441849040440504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595967764259972,0.0,0.0,0.1673538218077021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688724591303595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387183315150686,0.0,0.0,0.09997483348878652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14062090784528303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26841805707878524,0.27541747523764537,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OnesEKKOnd,2020/04/02,"Need help/advice or just another pov than my own So I'm kind of a depressed person. I'm diagnosed with a mild depression which is actually not as bad as it sounds I can socialize and do all the stuff everyone else does but something I noticed during this quarantine time is that I have no interest in caring for myself.

I should clean my room.
I should shower.
I should brush my teeth.

What ends up happening is that I have no interest in doing these things if they are not necessary.

Like it's not that I don't do that all the time just sometimes when I should do it I choose to not do it for  days and sometimes even weeks.

When I do it I feel amazing I have this great feeling of accomplishment and it's really just a good feeling but then I don't do it... For days... Weeks and then I'm upset with myself for not doing it and instead of changing it by myself I just sit on my computer and play my games again and I don't even enjoy playing then because I'm mad at myself for not doing what I should do...

I mean I don't even play that many videogames I'm more someone who likes to watch his shows.

I just want to be a normal self caring human being...


Does anyone have any advice?",1.7556379769299042,3.717049628571431,3.398633540372672,89.66875776397518,79.24489795918367,6.546583850931678,21.672582076308785,7.586124646067393,0.7984108251996456,929,27,198,14,23,308,123,245,0.098,0.7020000000000001,0.19899999999999998,0.9826,1,1,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,1,13,19,1,1,6,0,30,2,1,0,2,39,44,19,0,9,15,0,3,2,0,5,1,1,3,3,23,9,0,0,5,5,0,0,12,5,0,0,0,6,31,14,22,37,4,20,0,2,1,0,8,6,0,2,15,151,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.13124769353370772,0.0,0.0,0.2628538640989528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146119437910794,0.14102970711796345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404201301548172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229768546793263,0.08198688784001433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742531793160239,0.0,0.14227784914142294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17347626353359136,0.0,0.2316806481333861,0.1365095675577115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23539491626310516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235329279564794,0.0,0.11912262677974104,0.0,0.0,0.2664979857112831,0.0,0.0,0.12851571135454573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040140999953878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280800315729572,0.0,0.14828118369249374,0.0,0.0,0.11893346137064854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014914606932453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14005581882262047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314149014287127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635679385973035,0.0,0.14650445528664316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997263190740081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177651857628414,0.0,0.15312341937579554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174358236222484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616092431323122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030759019182906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137100688686408,0.11395715505480547,0.10354080184900492,0.2660379367142222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15396456763977684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935248453477168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685020188999008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932862033577961,0.0,0.21576751113266834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moniabx3,2020/04/02,"Emptiness, any advice? I used to be a really sensitive person. I could always feel lots of emotions going through my head and my body. I could cry, laugh etc and actually feel it. 
But I lost it. I feel like I’m no longer able to feel any emotions. I feel empty. Whatever happens - sth negative or positive, I stay numb. And even if sth makes me sad or happy, I’m like.. whatever. And I don’t really care. 
What’s wrong with me...? And how can I fix this?

Hope you’re all healthy and safe, take care x",-0.2862605042016817,1.9858784411764745,2.1749579831932766,92.44588235294118,93.01960784313728,6.0515406162464975,19.050420168067227,7.447530270364453,0.6937596638655457,379,12,84,8,14,129,69,102,0.203,0.5539999999999999,0.244,0.7928,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,2,12,0,0,1,0,5,3,2,3,1,25,21,11,0,4,4,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,7,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,5,13,8,5,17,3,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,5,2,45,17,0,0.15452360917664126,0.0,0.15079275225780014,0.0,0.0,0.15099868249836795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857602146320635,0.0,0.0,0.21016270616091667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17164089494114138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31509423602856784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467490564540647,0.0,0.16973692881084396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476365240290596,0.0,0.0,0.17233467070333575,0.10206138651430477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39065889857335095,0.11039169727106957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781932809305612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13664471727284774,0.16449325532337178,0.0,0.0,0.1585858030775607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15347681006190456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15098486030944042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16868077305825754,0.1313704467054241,0.0,0.0,0.10314570902089787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492405527958812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19798356168341136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16470160736188308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618252340039564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13345878497296482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16894730911210046,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mmtcambodia,2020/04/02,"DBT and Heart phobia. I'm going to a rehab center that uses DBT. And I wonder if someone with heart phobia has been helped with DBT?
I have some real problems with my heart too which makes my anxiety even worse, but it's not deadly at this point and it's getting better. But the phobia is getting worse everyday right now. I've had this phobia for 14 years in ""relapses"", I don't know what the English word is but I mean that I suffer from this maybe 8 month per year, and the rest I have under controll. And right now it's very bad.",2.5791111111111107,4.121852345454549,3.7657575757575774,89.83308080808081,75.54545454545455,5.9797979797979774,20.404040404040398,6.42735559955562,0.1711919191919189,418,9,87,3,9,136,72,110,0.251,0.7170000000000001,0.032,-0.9747,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,4,0,8,4,3,3,0,23,17,9,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,10,8,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,0,8,1,9,15,2,14,0,1,0,0,1,7,0,3,6,55,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576956131670575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13727151115034275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14540307766713792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843944602998492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858811282017823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17178990835449606,0.0,0.09343528862822628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5844630155516272,0.1101973692359216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903528222850065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974177669542737,0.0,0.16516716470986487,0.17908550727163586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122669688189942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541609562306888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15731361466158947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18712916004515184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2808023593887239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13930002934240396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419933443433774,0.0,0.1356515438364597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17829047356883565,0.0,0.0,0.33508597741509216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21174317321357344
mentalhealth,advil-line,2020/04/02,"Compulsive Lying? I'm a teenager and I've realised today after my entire life that I may be a compulsive liar. I've done a little bit of research and ever since I've been little, my mum, dad, brotjer and even myself notice that I lie a lot. Sometimes I lie for no reason at all. It wouldn't get me in trouble if I did or didn't lie. Like have you brushed ur teeth? Yes or no, it wouldn't matter but I say yes anyways. Now of course, that isn't the only incidents there's thousands more but I don't wanna tell my parents about this issue because they despise lying and would give me loads of religious mouthfuls. 

In conclusion, I may be a compulsive liar. What do I do? Is there something wrong with me?",1.4250000000000007,3.6566164999999984,3.231777777777779,88.99100000000001,81.91666666666666,5.506666666666668,23.488888888888887,6.742157984588678,0.8398422222222224,552,20,110,6,15,184,90,144,0.205,0.757,0.038,-0.9676,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,1,1,7,6,3,0,6,2,17,3,2,1,2,22,20,9,0,5,5,3,0,1,0,5,1,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,4,2,17,1,11,9,4,9,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,6,5,79,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984431847259267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325435117770155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179754625279558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14068611148538604,0.19267291356842411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112849904613768,0.20433136213343875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223192213989229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15044993194827938,0.1040622394793853,0.4269688317803387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810870686975613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24250470477474945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199796394065555,0.0,0.0,0.2365140171726567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190019974304108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16938810010210845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17619783041966516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16397969485589214,0.21066487270452106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861735325874401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20190141994027014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15131083143667606,0.2328847449232877,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_force_of_nature,2020/04/02,Im not worth it. Just feeling life is worthless.,-1.032,0.625173800000006,0.5200000000000031,100.24000000000002,111.0,2.0,25.0,3.1291,-0.060999999999999936,38,2,8,0,2,12,10,10,0.37799999999999995,0.4970000000000001,0.124,-0.4707,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.364780362952801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7792760561470715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5095724826949443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Eitionia,2020/04/02,"What's wrong with me? I've lost 3 of my closest family member in the past 3 years My dad,My Paw Paw and my Grandma. (I was there when they all died) 

 I thought I was dealing with it pretty well but apparently im not. 
everytime I see pictures/videos of old people or I hear an ambulance siren I breakdown crying.

What's wrong with me?",-0.04682539682539755,2.234563714285713,2.2776190476190514,92.58626984126984,90.42857142857142,5.396825396825397,20.63492063492064,6.937597516519254,0.5360158730158733,260,9,57,4,9,88,50,70,0.184,0.7609999999999999,0.054000000000000006,-0.8661,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,3,4,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,9,6,4,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,4,2,12,1,6,2,1,6,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,1,4,33,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542743712900887,0.0,0.23864990239963965,0.0,0.0,0.2402439086372701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822257110176602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608993604301291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25004250868107164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526921973821785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429035821477109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209777291360868,0.1604819012953535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23550250999958044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18446282622794224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18377248736699828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20813197090449706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5061829633256224,0.0,0.14906814574324187
mentalhealth,DreamOfChampagne,2020/04/02,"Sudden-onset depression? DISCLAIMER: I am not looking for medical advice, I have some amazing professionals that I work with but they're not scheduling right now due to COVID-19. Therefore, I'm wondering if you guys here can point me in the direction of materials/studies that are relevant to me so I can bring it up with my psychiatrist and therapist once they start scheduling again! I've only been working with them for 2\~ish months and so there's always the possibility of another diagnosis. 

18M

I guess I'm not entirely sure where to start with this since all my regular professional support groups (doctors, therapists, psychiatrists, etc) aren't working because of COVID-19. Their offices aren't open for appointments and so I figured it wouldn't hurt to see what's happening on r/mentalhealth.

I'll start by saying that I'm a senior (Gr. 12) in high school. My junior year (Gr. 11) was all that I could ask for. I had a 3.7 GPA and I was on a roll. I was certain about going to university and all that good stuff. Fast forward to the fall of 2019 and I'm starting my senior year of high school. I was off a bit of a bumpy start but I very quickly stabilized and got into the groove of things. Towards the middle/end of October, I noticed that I didn't feel motivated anymore and lost my 'drive.' Like the drive that you need to get up in the morning, get to school, eat, do work, etc. I was also sleeping significantly more than usual. Now, backtracking to the summer of 2019, I went to my general practitioner to see if he could help me with all these odd feelings that I had and became hyper-aware of thanks to reading up on what OCD and GAD are. I told him about it and we sort of narrowed it all down to OCD, and then I was put on Prozac for it. Now, This was also when I had been upped to the highest dose of Prozac I'd ever been on. Which was 70 mg. This led me to do research at home into what these symptoms mean and I sort of narrowed it down to me having ADHD. I sort of found it a bit of an odd self-diagnosis because I didn't really consider myself as having ADHD. I didn't have trouble sitting still or any of the other stereotypical characteristics that a person with ADHD would have — and to be honest, I'm still not quite sure if I have it, even after seeing the professionals and being put on a prescription for ADHD. It's been about 2 or 3 months now since starting on the prescriptions for ADHD, and I still don't feel particularly different. My psychiatrist also told me that it would be fine to stop taking the Prozac altogether to see if my symptoms change, and so far, nothing. I still feel unmotivated, despite going on week 5 or 6 of not taking the Prozac. 

So then, my question is, does any other diagnosis fit my situation? I'm thinking perhaps depression has something to do with it, but I'm not entirely certain since depression and ADHD/ADD aren't things that happen suddenly. I did well in school the previous year and didn't really suffer too much from attention/impulsiveness. Any pointers in the right direction would be greatly appreciated! All of you guys here are amazing people and it truly feels so comforting knowing that there are other people going through it as well!",5.204253938484619,6.396818527419356,6.2487396849212296,75.94334208552141,68.56451612903226,9.38034508627157,30.708927231807948,9.648456367147027,2.9016939234808703,2557,101,473,56,43,852,277,620,0.053,0.83,0.11800000000000001,0.9915,3,0,1,0,0,0,75.0,1,3,3,7,33,23,0,0,25,0,52,11,1,3,11,87,100,44,0,11,16,0,5,1,0,4,9,1,1,3,40,31,1,1,13,1,0,12,15,7,2,0,26,11,53,16,86,64,13,85,0,6,5,0,19,36,0,14,39,335,93,19,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4403113671547673,0.05966954316540474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649491588469882,0.05080887022188238,0.0,0.0,0.12457372931544584,0.06402932842799502,0.0,0.0,0.060557566519108826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057085170632777016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07444623513124796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332881376440053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459600120338428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09750683404319004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577790588900737,0.0,0.0,0.06379728914761527,0.0,0.06250002987411928,0.053436182743695666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062482155461812273,0.0,0.0,0.05408322791811281,0.0,0.13620159993832595,0.0403311883744561,0.055234503887689065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543751086147655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669518513011726,0.0,0.0,0.06380524511139911,0.0,0.10410963397237773,0.051216306344755685,0.048837238852682034,0.06732159347389878,0.06726719967436075,0.12092289955072992,0.10799468870498047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040928889374690136,0.1290317132991523,0.061250640442431725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536864165128861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033558338947973734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029832040553248326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0512770994262439,0.0,0.06665690390565049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651493557925818,0.0,0.06151401874879255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747896881615316,0.0,0.04488794454129251,0.045277050966032656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05859109094503481,0.06952003169821243,0.0,0.06502954225498896,0.0,0.04644076327781374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846660623799293,0.05331739726036257,0.0,0.0,0.0577237753397231,0.06883876495631615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276930445949302,0.06840394600823738,0.06494745773565698,0.06107899866247759,0.0,0.0782363692480335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10429403880747687,0.0,0.04855933042345127,0.0,0.24719393580449345,0.19463554489487095,0.0,0.06370147791499496,0.0,0.0,0.15153452920398958,0.068636779519038,0.0611065728783904,0.0,0.0,0.047008875950813406,0.0,0.0,0.2593220015346085,0.0,0.19505828338156864,0.0510509627028185,0.0,0.0,0.06990192399276313,0.0,0.06929297220092738,0.11510131874674175,0.12693458238171054,0.0918227626943763,0.0,0.0,0.0562181223238314,0.0,0.141796478080343,0.08113438927230837,0.03912636793021213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669562191736965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725168858874975,0.05038293626866869,0.0,0.0,0.04898063364355159,0.0,0.10980499538964514,0.056605525425331635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662196486164506,0.17781683413392965,0.0,0.0,0.1301310893023452,0.0,0.0,0.1179666942921787
mentalhealth,lipglo58213,2020/04/02,"I have a fear of foot steps and letting people know I am sleeping. I have no clue how to explain this but I will try my best... since I could remember i have always struggled with anxiety relating to these 2 problems. When I hear someone approaching my room I IMMEDIATELY begin to panic inside and my hear beats a million miles an hour. The same thing happens if I am laying down to take a nap and I hear someone, I snap up and act like I wasnt trying to nap.. my heart is pounding out of my chest and the last thing I want is for anyone to know that I was sleeping... why is this? Is crippling sometimes.",2.158470066518845,4.0209024227642285,3.7367627494456777,88.18789356984482,77.6178861788618,6.098743532889874,25.815964523281608,6.980632752743323,1.1004536585365856,470,18,97,5,11,156,78,123,0.14300000000000002,0.8170000000000001,0.04,-0.9032,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,2,6,0,3,6,0,14,5,5,1,0,18,24,9,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,6,7,0,0,4,2,0,3,2,4,0,1,2,3,19,2,13,19,2,12,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,5,71,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909754271711796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868961393791908,0.0,0.0,0.10848475120548393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16282074891577172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387495154025585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17458730878889064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371989662181919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5245972534707287,0.18385394407192004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15279186893662555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17053317961735456,0.1264682651111335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586517725070482,0.0,0.07579863738050834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18203553869725347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756173633709024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845795752077984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17575513267601656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12834199534844945,0.0,0.31052485001200336,0.0,0.2629168223391841,0.0,0.15344769029407845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16219686106963765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665377499611973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061500332356938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106738436413178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151171231505416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13999908337884634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JackMooney,2020/04/02,"Hi all I would love an opinion here I’ve suffered from anxiety, depression and obsessive compulsive disorder now for around 7 year’s. I’m a 23 year old male and I need help. Around 2 months ago I started experiencing this, basically my external occipital protuberance (ball on back of head) felt tender to touch it has never been right for a while (I fell and smashed it on concrete at a young age) anyway due to my OCD I’ve been constantly touching it for 63 days straight now and last night something happened. I was touching it usual and it’s if one side clicked like it always does but this time it was like 3 clicks. It didn’t feel like bone anymore it felt like a crushed monster munch. After that I’ve felt horrific and been physically vomiting. Now I don’t know if that’s just down to my anxiety or not as I do believe this is going to kill me, like I’m scared it’s bone cancer or something. I’d love an opinion on this and please keep the negative comments to yourself as I’ve had a lot of those for posting this same thing on a doctor subreddit. Many thanks",2.6719626168224258,4.843529887850469,3.9671121495327135,85.67823831775702,77.22429906542055,7.457570093457942,27.98971962616823,8.395991825355821,2.065441869158878,852,37,172,17,20,279,131,214,0.17800000000000002,0.6829999999999999,0.139,-0.9052,0,0,2,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,0,9,14,1,2,9,0,12,9,3,0,2,30,27,15,1,4,7,0,7,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,19,9,0,1,5,1,0,2,5,5,0,1,10,10,11,9,23,16,3,36,0,2,2,2,6,11,0,7,27,101,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11754970484622372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034114917828974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028907463581181,0.0,0.13151230192639451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23609990304410536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196798591393977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940471301163585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330300851643551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552170904231841,0.0,0.1142157697935576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15198117969796932,0.1357307314622723,0.116046859256892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705099646848807,0.09473575708762584,0.38197574711898985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536464009057875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172655286844689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609489200089636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08888488699851843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11786879926271975,0.14671199556672027,0.0,0.07287833143826193,0.10809387547774547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32392981999047593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127392642312381,0.2393692485676565,0.0,0.0,0.13444451491955453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584708332342173,0.0,0.0,0.09832774893790873,0.10227608581245648,0.0,0.0,0.12444438071862896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391506340848307,0.0,0.08985915849458369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145564646672867,0.0,0.0,0.12700257913160665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324719526538407,0.0,0.0,0.1327645480172864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041774741827845,0.0,0.0,0.09386119500914583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12208837147466503,0.0,0.0,0.08809939791113049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732526085142002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14604986433780615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09420149063695944,0.0,0.0,0.1707914458783748
mentalhealth,STockTOASTers,2020/04/02,"unorganized writing I'm sorry for about a year now I've progressively gotten more and more depressed, it started last feburary when a person I trusted and believed to be a friend turned their back on me after I went to them for comfort after my cousin who was living with my family committed suicide. I took a week off school and during that week I tried messaging them at least once a day and they just ignored all my message, once I returned to school and saw them they greeted me by telling that they had a fun weekend spending time with a friend of ours that I didn't know much at the time and I asked why they didn't respond to me and they responded to me telling me that I was an annoying and a needy bitch. They continued to ignore me whenever we agreed to talk or work on homework together and then get people to lie to me when I wanted to talk to them or someone that we knew, around summer I just stopped talking to everyone I knew, and during the summer I didn't talk to anyone I knew I just slept and played games with online friends. When the school year started again I was in a class with a person who was friends with the person who treated me like garbage and told me that they were running a discord server with everyone that we spent lunch with at school and I asked them to invite me to the server to which they said they would after school, so after school I got home and took a nap to which I woke to messages from the server owner telling me that I'm not allowed in for things I did to the person who treats me like shit and another person telling me that everyone was talking shit about me, and that really hurt me since some of he people I've known for years, people I cared for just deciding to go against me based on the lies of a person who is just actual human trash, come october I just stopped attending class and haven't really been out since then I've been in my room about 90% of the days since october. Now I'm just feeling completely empty, everyone I talk to online feels artificial and I feel all of them are starting to be annoyed by me, I feel completely alone and I just want it all to stop I hate it. I just want to be happy.",10.004268407591873,6.244686535469112,9.313554987212273,74.07396419437343,61.21967963386727,12.570682460627275,39.207026517700896,10.056822442137396,3.654625360075381,1724,59,351,25,17,551,186,437,0.125,0.77,0.105,-0.9008,1,1,0,0,0,1,17.0,4,0,16,2,21,24,6,0,23,0,20,4,3,1,4,70,56,27,1,4,12,1,4,2,4,1,0,1,3,7,21,32,1,5,10,4,2,7,5,10,0,0,27,6,68,14,64,25,8,54,0,2,1,0,60,13,3,3,36,245,89,10,0.0,0.0,0.06683107917830726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092937962686945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181206213329362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04788601649834657,0.0,0.0,0.06096580317942809,0.12804769067602156,0.0,0.0,0.05266042111563803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715867910242026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982460204934737,0.0,0.0,0.058993408796590936,0.14360957575643682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833378775370868,0.0,0.0589856755673475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617598359238609,0.0,0.0,0.06456117489448689,0.0,0.13851146234206574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21164409220629085,0.0,0.035780370799316986,0.0,0.03892136976940935,0.0,0.05477338146457773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290311773087962,0.0,0.06761435255649066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869562597556153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07331416822699192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037637338713181916,0.055824079995888586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691622112457275,0.0,0.060473146181132864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050344052351886805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586770292824516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243577157878953,0.35878860567645177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774596184998612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06514452630389793,0.0,0.0,0.41586035757648976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405968915180991,0.1699534774720274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05802676944144845,0.0,0.0,0.07666288970682864,0.14542123230040954,0.0,0.0,0.17176854711362408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749110241220602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302719076422809,0.23943419508345146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04549811739882624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986782837407534,0.0,0.0,0.06543995898096522,0.1521777949934943,0.046496540021876656,0.07449156624602885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12118195369440395,0.0,0.1098684116449653,0.0,0.0,0.06348589948905911,0.06179668886122629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049857595943440594,0.0,0.0,0.04864948662269256,0.0,0.0,0.13230548856522592
mentalhealth,TakyEpicDiamond,2020/04/02,"I am not feeling good, somebody have some time to help me? Hi, I am a 13-year-old living in Dubai, I have been feeling sad and I have an explosive temper which has been affecting my work ethic and overall mood the whole day to a sad and explosive person if somebody can help with my overall sadness and explosive temper I would love to chat! see you there!",6.227285714285713,6.1118961571428585,6.406428571428571,80.30107142857145,66.0,9.285714285714286,34.64285714285714,8.841846274778883,2.857571428571428,281,12,54,4,4,90,47,70,0.252,0.629,0.11800000000000001,-0.833,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,1,8,2,0,4,0,10,1,0,1,0,12,14,5,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,2,3,9,2,5,11,2,3,0,3,1,1,7,1,0,2,2,38,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938533249254372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30397097416629915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25211756403787783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029533804512346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654232486577012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27129091104097586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154148038538314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624604013346397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395283990403601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17527431437738436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355939184032306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188304383227168,0.0,0.0,0.21352791446053607,0.0,0.0,0.1935677503589343
mentalhealth,SomeAnchovies,2020/04/02,"Some Questions on Seeing my Doctor about anxiety So I'm going to see my doctor about my anxiety in a week. Some back story (if it matters) I was a really outgoing kid up until grade 10, grade 10 I became very quiet in social situations, unless I was drinking or doing drugs. (I was doing alot of different drugs on weekends during my school years) I've always had a good idea that I have bad anxiety, I have random mini panic attacks while overthinking and sometimes in social situations, eye contact makes me uncomfortable when talking to strangers people I don't know. I graduated highschool a bit later then I could have, due to focusing problems. Anyways after highschool I had no plans, Ive been working in factory envirements since. Anyways I've been self medicating with xanax for about a year and a half now. I also aquired diazapam tablets, someone told me it's less sedating then xanax.I don't abuse these pills in the sense of I'm not looking to get high of them I use them the same way doctor's prescribe it. 10mg in the morning 10mg at night. If I tell my doctor I've been self medicating for awhile now with these pills and they do work as I take them responsibly. Would me getting a prescription for any kind of anxiety releif meds be out of the picture? Doing this without a prescription is hard financially as I'm paying 5$ per tablet. 1mg Xanax or 10mg Vallium.

If you wanna get straight to the question:

if I tell my doctor I've been self medicating for a year and a half. In a responsible manner, is there a good chance that getting a prescription is out of the question?",4.354526881720428,6.034924232258067,5.701048387096777,77.1949059139785,71.19354838709677,8.650537634408602,30.336021505376344,9.188382445141503,2.8031505376344086,1272,54,230,27,24,427,166,310,0.084,0.85,0.066,-0.6373,1,0,3,0,1,0,29.0,0,1,4,3,12,7,1,1,20,0,25,16,1,2,0,34,41,20,0,8,9,0,1,0,0,1,14,1,0,4,8,8,1,0,5,2,1,1,5,4,0,2,10,6,30,3,40,28,6,34,0,0,4,0,19,15,0,13,17,152,38,14,0.0,0.10404841655273253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022697445182012,0.07307052008152319,0.0,0.0,0.05971835987051843,0.0,0.2687181068263347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999041613461683,0.0,0.06752561322664752,0.07332326719464058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587308004559243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011448044331954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174974915698599,0.0,0.4494205114253607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860269230399546,0.20367895853176002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835223819722346,0.0,0.049908248085012,0.14731294456746788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866650437252354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092783153380553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913435277685467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144756797884007,0.048261755659829535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07374390154681935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058618321803426215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09754454460388093,0.2653982260961389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241001374419651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303396335804013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06088103498797809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08402871145312404,0.0,0.0,0.2951243683606448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056257619636873896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887517755932009,0.1399570629076268,0.0,0.27483587615016425,0.0,0.0,0.07264287259875267,0.1974192755821972,0.0,0.1790361108020047,0.0744067955987447,0.0,0.0868529508703814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602722119287249,0.07058372816688628,0.15351131369549176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391260962408273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0758454237146647,0.0,0.07245796531803822,0.0,0.06970480018370702,0.0704412508805489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465215443304762,0.0,0.12786319094161125,0.0,0.0,0.0623824562691042,0.0,0.0,0.16965320556399882
mentalhealth,bigchungy1917,2020/04/02,"Quarantine is making me delusional Even though we've been in quarantine I still have had the fortune of spending time with my bf at his house. However, he's had weird stuff going on recently and it's made my paranoia flare up again, even on medication. I've been losing my shit when I've been by myself, to the point where I can barely touch my phone cause I think someone is recording my every action. 

I had therapy earlier today and my therapist kept telling me to keep up my reality checks, but it's getting difficult to be by myself again and I'm scared that I can't be alone because I'll keep stressing out to the point of hallucinating again. 

Any advice helps, even just someone to talk to. I just feel really alone and it doesn't feel good",5.0327702702702695,5.9975605202702695,5.8887567567567585,79.20354054054056,68.79729729729729,9.433513513513516,29.664864864864867,9.642632912329526,2.6642221621621625,599,22,116,13,10,197,93,148,0.13699999999999998,0.812,0.051,-0.8954,1,4,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,12,7,1,2,3,0,14,2,1,3,0,18,25,7,0,0,3,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,5,6,0,3,3,0,2,2,2,6,0,0,8,3,18,1,18,15,0,20,0,1,0,0,7,10,1,0,8,75,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994762296759687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31785172921873805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434991121729684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354048484897357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576333791870886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30405289737735075,0.0,0.12928656963229185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15517585256506233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017025378255449,0.0,0.08720804235035358,0.12870491353164815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285296898329102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17705840539127074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727832900292341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716690767575232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14519622070374,0.10242774063381788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15458273017101729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901159433017205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983027267850731,0.0,0.1515114013421424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15362823085470334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15751218087236046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600320079629528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254378189275235,0.0,0.17577418115347018,0.0,0.17566126347777208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333570083924103,0.13412032739769975,0.0,0.17548117669994484,0.17816497081589616,0.0,0.09832329116761934,0.15076189428222705,0.0,0.08947677073728583,0.0,0.14545077470521364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,icutmyself0no,2020/04/02,"I Have Serious Homicidal Thoughts TW: Murder // Hey Redditors, for as long as I can remember, I have had homicidal thoughts and obsessed with death. I’m a 19y/o male who’s grown up in a loving family, had no past trauma or anything notable that could contribute to these thoughts. I’m on SSRI medication which I take daily.

No one takes it seriously. I’ve tried talking to my friends about it and my girlfriend. They either just think i’m trying to be “edgy” or “dark”, or just write it off as a phase. I’ve had these thoughts for as long as I can even imagine. They’re so real to me. The irresistible desire to claim someone’s life or my own.

I often contemplate what would bring me to kill someone. I usually think of things like, if I got a disease and only had a certain amount of time left to live or even my life being so unbearable I would kill someone before killing myself. 

Sometimes I’ll see someone in the perfect position and my body begins to feel indescribably strange and a sequence of how I’d kill them flashes in my mind on the spot before I come to my senses. I’ll see a man having a smoke late at night and all of a sudden it feels as if I’m about to lunge at him with a rusty piece of metal. 

I don’t know what drives me to think this shit, honestly, I don’t know. It’s very very real. To me, it doesn’t feel like a matter of will I kill someone, it’s a matter of when I will kill someone. 

I just wanted to post this cause no one believes me and I feel like someone will have experienced this same tendency as me.",3.3756356107660466,4.456953495238097,4.697971014492754,85.7739130434783,72.77777777777777,7.763975155279502,27.66390614216701,8.18289091462,1.7059289164941336,1201,44,253,18,23,399,159,315,0.17300000000000001,0.7340000000000001,0.09300000000000001,-0.9835,0,0,1,0,0,1,30.0,0,0,2,1,12,20,8,1,15,0,21,7,3,2,3,54,48,25,8,7,11,0,4,3,2,5,3,0,0,2,18,10,0,0,15,0,0,4,6,12,0,2,9,7,33,8,42,31,6,25,0,0,2,1,12,10,1,8,13,163,51,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06629124971012629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370955323700333,0.09075974582178467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894802653076251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275385820551237,0.0,0.06939241119501334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431792098114845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106413800115593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594162952947205,0.0,0.16292742776068678,0.1150993574458072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062237859164967185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442850288981676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5347439110145862,0.0,0.08854364368997235,0.0,0.09087139715850467,0.0,0.08752502356130386,0.0,0.11379907239395005,0.11806771366366077,0.0,0.07113298776353841,0.1425801804103017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270551149166263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115233841692035,0.0,0.0,0.08133924088538266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559694828430567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091745262961378,0.06126695368826321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690042673216822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715099188201642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338218167415532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125496797319634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283864225468142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269023190882648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4777876493792878,0.0,0.07967257541866317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113713368299255,0.06474837468791657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05351825120030678,0.15485232387096345,0.0,0.2558118911874781,0.046973223796035836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938533948660076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872175647881382,0.13293532686298073,0.047514392605970165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114450249579179,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mikemcc360,2020/04/02,"What ways can I keep my aging parents healthy? I live across the country from my parents and have noticed since all of their kids have moved out they are less and less ""with it"" if that makes sense. Since the kids moved out my parents have pretty much retired and moved to a much more remote location so I don't think they are getting the same mental stimulation as before.

I was wondering if anyone has any advice of things I can do to help keep them stimulated and healthy as well as spend more time with them remotely?",6.386270627062707,6.659535960396037,5.812623762376242,83.3709488448845,65.63366336633663,8.713531353135314,30.69471947194719,8.344100000000001,2.040424422442244,416,14,82,5,6,127,65,101,0.0,0.8490000000000001,0.151,0.9282,3,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,5,0,2,1,0,0,4,0,11,0,0,3,1,19,17,10,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,8,0,2,2,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,1,0,13,1,13,16,8,9,0,0,0,0,11,3,0,3,2,61,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525122342630469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613464748513964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091295162713402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13280619662523654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154143616171274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046121024780722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774488065140814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378148710778843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041796012862117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15728436473358146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4976410826648093,0.2294624812022163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17768956820972334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5199001020535959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15878183489086814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582095587451904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368762962694957,0.10000495185782443,0.0,0.0,0.09100712601982887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12388308070684488,0.0,0.0,0.14032791514505594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16925396151623542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kamkammix3,2020/04/02,"Would you consider this ptsd? My earliest memories are of me and my dad(my bffff,notnow tho) he would tell me that if I talked to my mom about anything he wouldn’t b my friend again. He left me &his dog&him in a running vehicle which killed his dog from poisoning but my sis saved me. My parents would go in their room and lock us out alll day. We had no heat/windows/hella bugs n shit,so I would sneak in her room and wrap up in dirty clothes on the floor bc I would be so scared. We ended up going to Iowa for my dads job offer,within the first week(I was 5–6 I think) and my dad told us kids to go inside but I stayed out there bc I thought something was fishy going on. My dad ended up putting a gun to my moms head,I luckily begged Jim&he didn’t do it bc I was there.she soon left him after that(and a couple other thingsss. So all 4 of us pack up and move into a tiny travel trailer for a few years. I got made fun of for being dirty,not dressed or groomed. My mom did the best she could w her mental issues…I think. She was in the police force,passed the tests and everything,things were looking up! But then depression hit. She wouldn’t get out the bed I would have to make her food and feed her. At the age of 7–8 she met my step dad. Who is bipolar/ocd/depressed/idfk 😂 but he and my mom got involved in hard drugs. Had crazy ass fights, pulled guns out on me. I had to obey everything. Bc I was literally scared for my life. I lock doors& keep knifes on my night stand. He smashed a kitten in front of us. Plus living in this city I’ve had multiple people try to get in my vehicle/rob me/pull out guns. There’s a lot more that’s happened. But this is what I can remember right now& what sticks out. I forgot half of this happened but my family filled me in on a lot of info that I blocked. I now barley leave my house or go anywhere. Bc I think people are out to get me. Has anybody else felt with childhood trauma that’s caused this? Or am I just assuming that’s the reason why I think like this. And comments appreciated. Thank you so much!!💛
Also sorry for getting so fuckin deep on here. I’m uncomfortable w/professional help,but will be going in a few weeks. Just need some outside perspective‼️💛",1.037282608695655,3.2882742500000006,2.2606086956521736,95.24134782608698,83.67391304347827,5.332173913043479,20.28695652173913,6.65067331316558,0.1422834782608695,1745,51,388,19,50,556,254,460,0.124,0.8079999999999999,0.068,-0.9746,2,0,2,3,1,0,66.0,6,2,1,2,15,14,4,2,17,0,34,7,1,5,1,65,65,27,1,11,12,10,2,1,1,9,3,0,3,1,17,21,2,3,10,1,0,14,4,8,0,2,20,3,63,6,56,31,8,68,0,1,1,2,44,38,2,8,15,232,80,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05868430892817857,0.0,0.3975519127919607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060387905262303164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701086596128498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538449148653152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05859030469121766,0.08119682502343326,0.0,0.047325924128188784,0.0,0.06320461688643128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510091042614815,0.0,0.061302028324692434,0.0,0.12999100354353502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595185282769955,0.0,0.0691789029403402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045912836788759,0.0,0.0,0.062419489492254586,0.08873493979723285,0.0,0.05669547578929548,0.0,0.1533582251401502,0.0,0.250231288323068,0.0,0.11738207819931798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978457927277812,0.0,0.06573669848277841,0.0,0.07531206526615809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04918703643016533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08467405775775158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282124269525059,0.0652261269501516,0.08118734820243187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770193557907443,0.15946155349349198,0.0,0.051832539231901766,0.03585119674383795,0.0,0.06479847860573609,0.0,0.06162318587299714,0.0,0.0,0.12477509921218387,0.0,0.06943671016864279,0.04898368087783245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395274155461794,0.0,0.0,0.34378083984958874,0.0,0.0779944495979377,0.05394490290745914,0.05441251862294298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886491612503931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148306825562919,0.0,0.0,0.10174897873616587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578072742569086,0.07377012109555756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544988207491468,0.0,0.0,0.08312856349483039,0.06266862801125396,0.0,0.0,0.14693824519503634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07532653121585837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056493770763387276,0.0,0.08214619103233799,0.0,0.07821644789359082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05898242578982098,0.06413992221078296,0.06756114991206551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880832941392724,0.0,0.05825785574095268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012054192264427,0.0,0.04982219785330648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35308255557595786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11772673278976276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621668747125352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127748017599371,0.0,0.0,0.047256206055143316
mentalhealth,jv1190,2020/04/02,"Bad things just keep coming and i'm losing it This year has been the absolute worst for me, like for many others.. 
the most important person in my life left me in january and i've been going crazy about it since. i have wrote about it on reddit before so i dont want to tell the whole story again.. but basically it's hurting me alot and everyday is a big big struggle mentally. i started to self harm again and i have suicidal thoughts.

now couple weeks ago my dad lost his job, we have to sell our home and everything and i dont know where to go. i'm stressing about school because i get nothing even started. i quit my job too in january because the anxiety got bad. so i've just been sitting home since(i have online school).

my dad is an alcoholic and he is now going to a hospital and he almost didnt even tell me why he was going first, just said he'll tell me later. he never talks to me about anything anyways. 
he's been abusive to me and my mom when i was a kid so i'm just not close to him and we always fight if we speak to each other. 
cherry on top, i dont have any friends anymore. it's pretty complicated. the only person who cares for me is my mom who lives away from me.

my psychologist was supposed to call me yesterday but didnt, and i really needed to talk. i was ready to kill myself last night. mostly because i cant live without him(the guy who left me)... also cuse i'm so lonely and no one would care if i was gone. 
i'm just waiting when the bad things stop crashing onto me. i try to think that this is just part of the plot and i must get through it, and good things will come.. but it's really, really hard. sorry for the long post i'm just happy i can vent this somewhere.",1.3751817580964951,3.307270741573035,3.177237276933248,90.93263384005293,80.34831460674158,6.210707204230008,21.4256444150694,7.285733465282438,0.6111598810310643,1328,39,290,18,34,443,185,356,0.2,0.7240000000000001,0.077,-0.9938,2,2,1,0,1,1,39.0,4,0,0,5,27,19,2,2,13,0,30,2,0,0,2,51,61,26,2,6,14,4,1,1,1,4,2,2,2,5,19,21,1,3,3,0,1,7,10,13,0,2,17,3,42,6,32,40,7,43,0,4,0,0,35,14,0,6,21,189,61,4,0.0,0.10147869226264873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592164777774807,0.0915315001936243,0.08576394595657526,0.0,0.0,0.0684925514971327,0.07126586897232169,0.0,0.0,0.05824347226523264,0.0,0.06552036775641598,0.0,0.08493964896260936,0.0,0.0,0.07048087958306379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804689706653959,0.0,0.21453712167448127,0.15663039588886207,0.0,0.07288000867837262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745602676241856,0.0,0.17464737423977325,0.0,0.0,0.14755607108933674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476771254352724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30113591289684816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313918902901075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697476137379355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285201404868406,0.0,0.0,0.06617131335576053,0.0,0.08949492909404383,0.0,0.19470257853352604,0.07183734968465555,0.06850040652047924,0.0,0.0,0.08480483306853842,0.0,0.09117372467509956,0.07672364705859598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17182354565959918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09168779054671908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16998454293783766,0.07612774079966378,0.09475665180749196,0.0,0.047069816273243095,0.06981442575027265,0.0,0.0,0.18611327054788526,0.0,0.06049560653279675,0.04184321131252301,0.0,0.1512572343067373,0.07579564852354058,0.0,0.0958180317959633,0.09349474135315132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683347287622321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631288417288732,0.0,0.0,0.2006194441681424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350679256412071,0.06605689885226032,0.0,0.0,0.08037470152051385,0.0,0.08218141816575779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05803719702874085,0.06513904631766218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274827088908794,0.0,0.0,0.14956879105986345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202696121023201,0.08713465033163538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109702681563094,0.0,0.0,0.16460460984524825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147071469901741,0.0,0.0,0.17336038533098946,0.0,0.0,0.0893493824721593,0.0,0.0,0.07084878326608253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958757514970764,0.12124397244221273,0.0,0.0,0.07160543430707987,0.09810931821146712,0.08953772477326911,0.0,0.09368484230876052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768098865335002,0.22457997743931968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17070186947020805,0.05487968140406415,0.0,0.06799482276145083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05814926535718928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05051731862602443,0.0,0.06870153585740008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728385933870346,0.09562276139061322,0.0,0.08256146718703572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060841772436894564,0.0,0.0,0.055154404744755296
mentalhealth,Billyxransom,2020/04/02,"people who are otherwise completely healthy and under 30 are dying from this fucking thing, and it is making me lose my mind so i'm 35 and i have spina bifida, so, automatically, my immune system is quite a bit more compromised than most folks, and that's just the way of it.

my girlfriend is 33, and she has cerebral palsy. so she's in a worse place than i am.

i just heard about a 25 year old who was in seemingly, nearly perfect health, fucking gone, all because of covid-19.

i'm just kinda losing my shit a little bit.",2.8707585470085446,4.762403105769239,4.3474358974359015,84.4753418803419,75.63461538461539,6.92991452991453,24.055555555555557,7.793537801064563,1.247858119658119,409,13,81,6,9,136,73,104,0.11,0.805,0.086,-0.3716,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,7,6,3,0,5,0,9,5,1,1,2,15,17,8,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,7,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,3,1,10,1,10,14,5,11,0,2,0,2,6,6,3,3,2,55,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161350094071974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4159818965587915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19974934679927064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977225059141487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.352252557635699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202506502426803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19094416251203264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4262708254366852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271689647672053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923639084461868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999114367985185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207778652108482,0.0,0.19904562701525008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20263411848312876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17343595901045214,0.0,0.0,0.1955589458072014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12656842948169109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122042061171412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19414911139150506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268418165319872
mentalhealth,redbullqueen69,2020/04/02,"Weed use and Severe Depression Hi all. First time posting here. Not sure if this is the right place but I figure it is worth a shot and could help lead me in the right direction.

So I'll start off with saying that I began smoking weed when I was 13 years old (22F now) and used it basically everyday up until I was 19. I was diagnosed with Major Depression and Generalized Anxiety shortly before I started smoking weed. I started taking Prozac but hated the idea of taking medication so I stopped before I could feel an effect. Later on I was prescribed Clonazepam, but never took it because of fear of becoming addicted to it. Not long after I tried weed for the first time I started experimenting with other drugs (mushrooms, ecstasy, cocaine) but never really had a problem with any of those. But still was obviously horrible on my developing, already sensitive brain. I had a few other traumatic experiences that may have lead me to feeling how I do right now (mostly involving sexual experiences/relationships.)

 I stopped smoking for a few months because I started post-secondary",7.1080000000000005,8.49004513333334,7.8692307692307715,65.36076923076925,64.33333333333334,10.923076923076923,37.05128205128205,10.891193690592663,4.64428205128205,871,43,133,24,13,291,120,195,0.185,0.738,0.077,-0.9748,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,5,8,6,1,1,9,0,14,6,1,6,5,39,28,15,0,4,8,0,2,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,10,8,0,2,5,0,1,3,4,5,0,2,9,3,19,1,19,16,5,40,0,2,0,0,4,10,0,3,26,99,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415924947328895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568281443020246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077450564322248,0.0,0.08712717940693282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885518931479096,0.12578492641647745,0.19382765417025904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12714130053258285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818672210446016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19619027569329173,0.1155981300540055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207873016821028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22281674455702608,0.0,0.1281603273474254,0.11517458146488466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937532011961129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124449143058094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07633950424151514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857036902781158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079096460090718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473435431380165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090762377247602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17568128734451174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195106477561874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11899305111594945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181543849735052,0.0,0.0,0.10897940156807097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296222464497565,0.0,0.0,0.12227754109116175,0.0,0.29178980933324195,0.0,0.0905716052270538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286657060623834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40306723316382254,0.0,0.09095441434551907,0.1904378664227924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734199907345277,0.0,0.17126543840472938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282285162474555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265383640477369,0.07732529057212224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19673249167249102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334280746323063
mentalhealth,ConversationSeek,2020/04/02,"Can't stand my family.. Crazy fucked up family idk what to do. I was in special education in highschool and I keep telling myself these same old stories. Maybe I'm being manipulated but the thought that I am hurts me so much I can't even think. I'm 22 and just working a stock produce job. During covid 19 I have no idea what I want to fucking do with my life and I'm just manically depressed all the time while my red pill MGTOW father confronts me and asks: ""hey.. if you ever need someone to talk to, I'm here""

How the hell do I get out or at least endure?? I know I need to build a social network but how even if I just feel so defeated all the time??",2.808260869565217,3.699859101449277,4.499246376811595,87.38452173913046,73.92753623188406,7.259130434782609,25.394202898550724,7.554174236665415,1.0761281159420302,508,16,114,6,10,172,91,138,0.23399999999999999,0.743,0.023,-0.9858,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,3,11,8,4,0,6,0,9,4,0,4,3,31,25,14,0,5,8,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,2,17,1,11,22,5,11,1,3,1,2,7,5,3,3,5,74,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675793084842625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284848102978464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497621475667005,0.17102754551497312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35648279565981555,0.0,0.0956010973455142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3495902768754158,0.09878294991634792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20240678467937767,0.2134406430454279,0.0,0.0,0.18762598910980355,0.16805695881954485,0.0,0.0,0.10390969299736387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354800167523834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18994945530434296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389905663626427,0.28039078292881503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984005311701208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19273632977636312,0.1602011195381879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519698863863595,0.1652583216217057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211504802437705,0.0,0.15010301118529787,0.22050022160067606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11152027955681967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13764755068229806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mlooghan,2020/04/02,"Anyone been up rather late at night, feel physically and mentally tired, but have all your senses super alert. I'm sitting here (22F), I can feel that my brain is tired, my eyelids are tired, I'm physically tired too. It's 1:49am when I am typing this. I'm in the complete dark with just my phone on. There's next to no sound in the house. 

But my senses are fully alert. I can hear static, I can taste the minty residue of toothpaste, I can almost feel everything that my skin is touching with detail, if my nose were not clogged I'm sure if be able to smell what my pyjamas smell like, and my actual eye itself does not feel tired (typically when I'm on my phone my eyes shake when I'm tired. Or start to close.) It's a very odd sensation, and I've never noticed if it has happened before. Has anyone else experienced this? I'm not entirely sure if it has anything to do with my own mental health, or if it is just a naturally occurring phenomenon. But my mental stability has been worn very thin recently, and I'm just beginning to recover from that.",5.19535164835165,5.5230157000000055,6.1061904761904815,80.05598901098902,68.19047619047619,9.699633699633699,28.534798534798533,9.661875296680813,2.351018315018315,827,26,170,17,13,274,116,210,0.16399999999999998,0.773,0.063,-0.9679,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,0,1,10,5,0,1,5,0,20,13,5,0,4,34,37,17,0,6,17,0,7,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,12,8,1,0,4,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,4,16,18,4,16,32,2,20,0,0,2,0,4,8,0,8,11,102,30,1,0.10514922342690057,0.0,0.10261047410682372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529175848818584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470455637226171,0.10773780536119794,0.08652885158586751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947424453004409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738130828047405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024696021541217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201679400899317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783868371952287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450134195503207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21266642698120827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298311101576506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176870750343568,0.11851081681490205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12132808622966668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861290400334035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05137059927395428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31789705755908004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109756335083225,0.0,0.11182739200644023,0.09867542318240492,0.0,0.0,0.11971308779588673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382217283723136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744251615416431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19820379737981828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7251213855215279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735182428894315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,binbic,2020/04/02,"I'm afraid my online friend will pass if I stop talking to him Warning: suicide reference and S/H

I'm keeping my friend alive

We have only been talking around two weeks but very consistently. It was clear we completely clicked on a lot of opinions and ideas. Though it's still interesting to talk. He began to open up maybe a few days in but very gently.

Last night he told me he asked me what was up I told him what I was doing. I asked what is he up to and he said he's writing his suicide note. I'm really scared he's going to kill himself. He has told me I'm the only one in his life. I feel this immense pressure all of a sudden. I'm still trying to recover from depression, a suicide attempt, an ED and PTSD and grieving my mother of which he knows some about and this is undoing all the work I've put into getting better. I don't think I'm ready to literally carry someone's life in my hands. I know that is selfish but our for this past week I've been getting worse and I'm slowly slipping it's scary but I feel awful how selfish that is.

He says I'm the best thing to ever happen to him. He only does things other than go to work and entertainment because I asked him to (like talk to his parents or shower etc) I'm keeping him alive. He says I'm the only reason he hasn't killed himself. I'm the only reason he's still here I'm so scared I can't just let him die but I'm getting more ill and loosing weight he keeps monologuing these thoughts that I've had for years and it's bringing everything back. I can't let myself get any worse.

What do I do? Please help
Please also tell me if I'm being selfish I need to know if I'm in the wrong",0.9718089842169136,2.9361120084985863,2.9179328207203565,92.10621529745043,81.88951841359774,5.394059085390531,21.700445163901254,6.474141703775902,0.3262039498178875,1301,41,286,12,35,436,173,353,0.223,0.659,0.11800000000000001,-0.9939,2,0,0,0,0,3,24.0,3,0,0,5,13,19,2,4,11,1,23,5,1,3,4,51,65,23,7,5,10,2,4,1,2,1,3,3,1,0,19,15,1,4,11,1,0,5,4,12,0,2,12,8,36,7,31,49,8,31,0,2,1,0,49,11,0,7,16,160,55,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539164952358856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05560658264518565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07279287008892878,0.22933247229929496,0.0,0.0,0.06287628462495852,0.0,0.049846393166485016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581284585989764,0.0723191523518461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573456467716913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052735054744496884,0.0,0.0704286074284096,0.0,0.084864622803815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715577079126297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911954578826032,0.0,0.07396588403127598,0.0,0.0,0.07348983952112936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08269100346647912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635100421559242,0.0,0.17088634923174426,0.0,0.0929438493566436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230917323878347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054808883432227284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923086734567967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21804349976373444,0.1809333607694152,0.0,0.13481639367786458,0.06665367781697461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16723126739319535,0.11551350953176755,0.039948819970657766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951815319951969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214921953385014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060631613671073004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07673585225705172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05540964622399494,0.3109498473920689,0.0,0.0,0.09079619984960308,0.0,0.07805896822754384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795183865504493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558506125656713,0.08220169909297613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05238412412099104,0.16814689770913654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07778224501181631,0.13005398980465724,0.16373259576362134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928367821547668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959055122131265,0.06836360103169657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26833018656854635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628953589634615,0.07147081375382452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864905820583524,0.052395082587790534,0.08033886791424305,0.0649164547421109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23440497053930134,0.0,0.055516640819705115,0.0,0.07987766495592022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13493806077378828,0.0,0.0,0.13118234483372773,0.09957415090900493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905945022247535,0.0,0.1666617670027913,0.0,0.0894029457312995,0.0,0.052657368223494684
mentalhealth,titant16,2020/04/02,"Am I stupid? Can someone help me explain what is going on in my head? So I'm in college and I have a few stressful classes. One of them is chemistry. I have a study group. In this group, I would literally teach my friends a topic like I'm a teacher or something. Then, 15 minutes later I can't understand the topic one bit and completely forgot the whole topic that I was just teaching to my friends. In classes, I can study for many hours and not retain a single thing. Also, every word my professors say goes in one ear and out the other. I just can't retain anything. Can someone help explain what is wrong with me?",2.120860215053764,4.286297000000005,3.5706451612903223,87.86763440860216,79.0,5.423655913978496,26.46236559139785,6.42735559955562,1.0899913978494626,484,20,94,4,12,159,76,124,0.079,0.802,0.11900000000000001,0.5913,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,0,4,6,1,1,8,0,13,2,2,0,0,18,20,8,0,1,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,0,6,6,0,3,3,0,0,1,3,3,0,3,2,2,15,3,11,17,4,11,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,4,70,21,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15644851998250514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099019611347232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21358176963166087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20511863292650265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16483016782055504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022928424630434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118336805434534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007770281854449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26225882837754233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19266018211140806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557693994555727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19834227254615905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3977001899013645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15557608938599113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315202780393363,0.1506086888571831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22409820185074034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12997060387400336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036619986697966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21841848740045766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13897285241685012,0.21389517841559505,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Car-El,2020/04/02,"I've been using alcohol to help with the shakiness that my medication causes but I don't know what to do about it I'm on Latuda which causes me to have Parkinsons-like tremors and shakiness after I take it and my doctor has prescribed propranolol to help with that. It helps some but I still feel shaky and restless for a few hours after I take the latuda and the only thing that seems to genuinely help is alcohol (though the propranolol makes it *much* more manageable than before). Maybe it just makes it less annoying but I don't know what to do, I don't want to become an alcoholic but I know from experience that if I stop taking the latuda I will get very depressed and possibly try to kill myself. I already had alcoholic tendencies before this but they were manageable but with the shaking I don't know what to do, I physically can't ignore it and I can't find any other option that works.",4.63417395104895,6.101116062500001,5.579772727272728,79.17187062937066,70.19318181818181,9.27902097902098,27.174825174825173,9.661875296680813,2.5180625874125866,721,24,135,17,13,237,95,176,0.16,0.758,0.08199999999999999,-0.9204,0,0,4,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,1,1,4,9,2,5,8,0,16,6,0,5,0,37,31,14,1,2,8,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,19,9,4,2,7,0,0,1,6,9,0,0,3,1,18,0,19,27,5,7,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,7,5,101,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5333571342547776,0.0,0.0,0.13768483417748828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484666860785248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779669729864405,0.2123371325223169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256342663436898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746268572410053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770556083977105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204726105707593,0.0,0.0,0.06308656128663012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140358934164152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518624573365536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345180335222939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228715648137816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13803755033161266,0.0,0.27427740465620104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16656751240949913,0.0,0.12534644775164522,0.0,0.0,0.1256908561427058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171899828105604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489185416655482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065742214795074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358430222189245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964006227619916,0.104311819314399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814305232659964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289046186282682,0.0,0.12258414342317035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470943190137789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775968304041177,0.0,0.1029468489199733,0.07359152924298046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09083275070252923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elst3r,2020/04/02,"Would getting a goldfish or small rent friendly animal be a good idea to help me get out of bed every day? I struggle with getting up when im at my worst. When this happens I miss school and then my grades tank causing a downward spiral. Usually if I can just get up I can get to class and be functioning. 

I took this semester off to work on mental health. Switched meds and am feeling better maybe. Havent been sad yet. 

Thought a cat as like an emotional support animal would work, but I really cant afford a cat. I have a cat at home with my parents who doesnt like others. It would be irresponsible for me to get a cat or rabbit or hamster. But i figured a goldfish would serve the purpose of there being another life i have to take care of. 

What are your thoughts?",2.806153846153848,4.499166282051284,4.142564102564105,86.73576923076925,75.28205128205127,7.107692307692307,27.384615384615394,7.882392219407189,1.6439000000000004,604,24,124,9,13,199,100,156,0.061,0.784,0.155,0.8844,3,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,3,5,11,0,1,10,0,18,2,0,1,0,23,33,13,0,5,7,1,1,2,1,4,2,0,3,0,6,6,0,0,5,0,1,1,3,4,0,0,4,1,15,7,19,21,1,16,0,2,0,0,5,9,0,4,8,84,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14972607891426246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628472910877447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558228194578746,0.1466830114107671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208670022216016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061772215745504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030537863509627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219810128368075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103179574226605,0.0,0.4476062485382691,0.0,0.0,0.1197641286226443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626730344007014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177738356213935,0.0,0.0,0.09570804927744056,0.0,0.14322839938491322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1611907142546081,0.15423596592268687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085566399238033,0.13951839157807647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434501317833088,0.0,0.15860571412345995,0.0,0.143897114902627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15854961139931806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914739001922345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450947576707882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14927342995527082,0.0,0.0,0.16203457507175234,0.0,0.0,0.10735910051566884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22671606718853424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15864315732851494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15726124074657666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20790329988984044,0.0,0.0,0.4057311073834521,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoyalResource7,2020/04/02,"Is there something wrong with my sis? 
Is there something wrong with my sis?
I have a older sister who is one year older than me. Throughout my life, I experienced bullying from her and made me miserable, she's the reason why I have low self-esteem and got insecure of myself, she called me disgusting and 'ew' whenever I'm there and made fun of my removed mole everyday. I had a mole when I was a kid on my cheek and for some reason my sister has this weird obsession with moles and bullied me to the point to request my parents to have it removed but it still kept on going. She called me ugly several times and even changed my password in Facebook that I couldn't access it anymore.

My parents knew about this and they tried scolding her in every way they can but she got worse and even hitting my head with a charger and other violent stuff. I don't know what it is up with her and she even accused me of something I didn't even do. She would laugh out loud for no reason and would mock my actions.

I learned that it is okay to have a simple teasing between siblings and stuff like but what she did to me was already too much and in need of help.

Whenever we have a social gathering within a family and I am asked about my achievements, she would embarrass me and talk me down and how that I'm a 'weirdo' in front of every one. It made me feel uncomfortable and ashamed.

One time I had enough, I was asleep and she kept teasing me about my moles and how ugly I looked. I snapped and broke down in front of her. I cried and I angrily scolded her for what she did to me all those years and I even confronted her what the hell is her problem with me, I reached to the point of violence where I kicked her multiple times. All she replied was how embarrassing I am and that I'm going crazy, she even called me overreacting and said that I hit our baby cousins instead of her (who are also there watching) and she would tell everyone that I hit them, she laughed at me afterwards. I tried fighting back after all those years and even confronted her about it, she never said sorry and laughed at me.

Several days past the incident, she grew worse and kept teasing to me how horrible I was and my moles and shit like that, I tried avoiding her a d kept on going like that for weeks, my parents and relatives knew about it and told me to never mind her. It was hell, I noticed that there could be something wrong with her. Is there something wrong with my sister? If there is what's the mental illness does she have?",5.02468,5.578060337999999,5.25375,85.22562500000002,68.62,8.49,30.025,8.472884824447931,2.0269999999999992,1979,72,407,28,32,625,202,500,0.242,0.7,0.059000000000000004,-0.9986,3,1,5,0,2,0,37.0,2,0,3,1,30,35,12,7,15,1,39,6,4,10,5,82,67,43,0,9,4,9,1,3,0,4,2,3,0,1,32,43,0,5,8,0,0,9,6,27,0,3,25,7,96,8,53,32,6,48,2,3,2,0,64,19,3,2,22,309,128,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194226168534167,0.05938171313548295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364102750263933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941842055748207,0.0,0.0,0.05709752734219399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22746803468370425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785519659162313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059286591752362214,0.0,0.0815656533672026,0.04788834531375578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498106891106402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672528588411576,0.0,0.3433131854715767,0.0,0.125126114873931,0.07095385429946999,0.0,0.0,0.07000102488142568,0.0,0.03754556952230115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12660251822091226,0.0,0.11877704657661495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620707369578246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04977157507052341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04080861737782713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05244851702214613,0.1088317568778988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0623555156879043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107856876709068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483159578403392,0.0,0.07497640306551813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05458598402330445,0.05505915688299493,0.11454009910636034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453983309677683,0.0,0.0,0.1509513710534992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24735423861648576,0.0,0.07088481928059813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403899915960916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105202634177216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22903958495763746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126705761289546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746418089004066,0.16777407482306475,0.07622171155879941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569364233276919,0.0,0.2858257130981025,0.0,0.08312241619859319,0.0,0.0,0.05930015535955813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17000846642720174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059683372817299525,0.06490216091518212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298960989412657,0.0,0.0,0.07095385429946999,0.0,0.15124285425215514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05894017905491259,0.05956289852075392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700360644976153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15134441952320618,0.21099454457632533,0.3247448330520007,0.0,0.14345339613381844
mentalhealth,SBMSP123,2020/04/02,"I wouldn’t mind if I died I always told myself that if the world came to a point of something like this, then I would rather kill myself than live through it. Now that stuff like covid-19 is actually happening and there’s no real end in sight, I can’t help but think about all the times I thought about that. I don’t actually want to kill myself. I am excited to work in a career that excites me and I want to spend time with friends and I want to fall in love and have a family and all this stuff that will happen in the future. And even though I want all that, I also just think about how I really wouldn’t mind if I died. I’m staying in quarantine, but I also don’t mind going out if necessary because I’m not afraid of the virus killing me. Just confused and needed to get this off my chest.",3.816358192705497,4.290972323353298,4.603962983124664,89.09491562329889,71.27544910179641,7.988894937397933,24.762656505171474,8.00094639256281,1.0525017964071854,626,16,142,8,11,202,91,167,0.153,0.6890000000000001,0.159,-0.5994,0,1,1,0,0,2,12.0,0,0,0,1,13,11,3,2,7,0,10,2,1,1,3,40,27,18,5,13,10,0,0,2,1,4,0,0,0,0,12,10,0,0,3,0,1,3,7,5,0,0,3,1,21,6,21,20,3,19,0,0,1,1,4,9,0,5,8,100,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.2422662697256409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985336959028051,0.10328624098192904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566859633351787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14197183988918627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576550268939332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10994248223659557,0.0,0.0,0.08198680315740582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170188720809177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959026574138631,0.0,0.06485288782950292,0.0,0.07054603324217908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21953578959028025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320183292043183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4119949078441939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212874569385114,0.0,0.10960920969709476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203232010604593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760082427767093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920409443588584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734312816027992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14128730310507456,0.07952096211168416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955614653217424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323062396432802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841986816509669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15907519490748445,0.12195725668235638,0.09854548538502124,0.1447625946578724,0.0,0.0,0.11861169195711135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928607492259682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036823836466096,0.0,0.0,0.08817850761246471,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JOSHB5725,2020/04/02,"anxiety relapse due to being back home due to colleges switching to remote learning Background:

During my senior year of high school i struggled with depression and anxiety that caused me to form a habit of twisting my hair till it fell out. I was medicated which helped the problems, however going off to college was sort of a solution. I stopped the depression and anxiety medication because i simply did not need it anymore and my anxious habits went away. 

Fast Forward to my second semester, and my school cancelled in person classes due to COVID-19(I attend school in a different State). My anxious habits (not depression) have relapsed slightly. Pretty sure they are just bad habits.

Any suggestion as to what I should do? Maybe meditation?",8.832109375000002,10.141474242187504,7.889062499999998,66.99968750000001,60.484375,10.775,42.5625,10.686352973137794,5.164731250000001,605,34,86,14,8,187,89,128,0.209,0.742,0.049,-0.9624,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,2,7,0,1,5,0,8,3,1,1,1,17,11,6,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,5,6,0,1,1,0,0,5,2,6,0,1,4,1,13,1,19,5,1,21,0,3,0,0,4,7,0,1,10,60,18,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858383038502247,0.0,0.3327024593716678,0.327547210374025,0.14377020497954998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362030635675229,0.11147214383338792,0.12104298497254384,0.08837170233217621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14892300468217334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3745845307530399,0.0,0.0,0.151461656488426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08238917268817035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716960494321927,0.15316761336527568,0.14541563734662952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14564075581595234,0.0,0.0,0.2920818517976317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749261029506507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265812610003013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474854993162876,0.0,0.13871566893879705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4401488310601875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212005005166708,0.0,0.1515529814553636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663148257793556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438763248201308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335522541621458
mentalhealth,narcissusintheflesh,2020/04/02,"Anyone else find it incredibly hard to open up at all, and feel like even though you have people to talk to, you have no one? I feel like I have a lot of things I need to get off my chest personally and that I'm not appreciating that I have people to talk to in my life. It's like I have no one to actually discuss with. Especially with my particular personality.

I can't talk with my parents because my father is sort of a manly guy, from a country where men don't talk about their feelings much, our relationship is more like two male coworkers than father and son, we talk about sports and current events and sometimes my university work.

I've been much closer to my Mum but whenever I used to tell her about how I'm feeling she would end up making me feel guilty, she'd end up crying and saying I'm scaring her when I told her I was feeling suicidal so I just pretended I was okay.

I can't talk to my younger sisters as although the one closest to me is quite mature. I feel as their older brother I need to be more protective and not show them how damaged I'm feeling, I need to be stronger. 

I can't talk to my friends about it cause I feel so ashamed I don't know why. It took me a year to even tell one of my closest friends anything that was up with me at all. I feel as the sort of ""cocky funny guy"" of the group, showing vulnerability will just make them think less of me.

I even can't even muster up the courage to commit to any of help I need to recieve, such as therapy, I thought my friends would find out so I stopped going, I've been to many mental health helplines and online outlets and I always give a fake name cause I don't want it to be traced back to me. I have made multiple posts on this very subreddit but I always delete them after a few days. I can't help it but Idk why, I'm so goddamn ashamed of how I feel

Anyone else feel this way as well? There's so many places I can go to but for some reason I can't accept any of them",3.724945163610212,4.138407220873791,4.88198489751888,87.23957029845378,71.45145631067963,7.851276519237684,27.63790003595829,7.793537801064563,1.3572704782452352,1533,51,349,18,27,507,189,412,0.14400000000000002,0.73,0.126,-0.8923,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,2,2,6,2,25,16,0,3,10,1,31,3,1,10,3,68,66,29,1,7,8,7,13,4,3,3,2,1,0,7,12,16,0,2,19,4,0,3,13,5,1,5,9,14,63,11,59,50,10,33,0,1,0,0,50,17,0,4,15,228,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.07110661695695579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12126054828421788,0.0,0.0,0.09910263472128207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189907673517357,0.1493194710244946,0.05996243520945189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056029386912505384,0.0,0.04441838231340465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970672246120645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003978042504646,0.0469924837918732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174023542167693,0.0,0.12907513671709647,0.0,0.0,0.19250898490296853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4421183206077269,0.10411084107891697,0.0,0.0,0.1331962430086045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16888806354110414,0.0,0.038069430454905934,0.06989962031937175,0.08282275150007619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442974133808212,0.0,0.0,0.06527354288140014,0.0,0.0,0.07745305478217562,0.0,0.0,0.09768096681869408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04004519843255981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146734701152879,0.14239441176812273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061947990825026965,0.0,0.06894748570197276,0.09727712124470778,0.14774919161489544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343169886037199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10712965556326114,0.2161165954234906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975033051324352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090896976344572,0.0,0.0,0.10103209440026452,0.1272474037829431,0.07612936705050792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978539961607771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750186434277359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749182911019442,0.0,0.0782307178483205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794589611762529,0.07295148729722542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206624799505018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06091916333454327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970347873463036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4099680074493925,0.12737603376695347,0.0,0.08332851821378814,0.0,0.04840887272685348,0.04668953282043463,0.07159038644425564,0.05784739320125305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06962649943933245,0.0809567069019356,0.0,0.0,0.07117940606983947,0.0,0.0,0.06293275081543218,0.0,0.060122006742400924,0.04297820150638578,0.057837567591471635,0.0,0.0,0.0655152037781381,0.0,0.1315003001025815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05304725018260133,0.0,0.0,0.10352370343153762,0.0,0.0,0.04692325692566948
mentalhealth,Swagfag9000,2020/04/02,"I think I'm having a psychotic break ? Don't know what to do. So the past couple of days I've been thinking about the word ending for some reason. I dont want to think about it I just start thinking about it. Cant really help it. 

Now every song I listen to or movie I watch I feel like I'm finding coded messages about the end of the world, like every piece of media is trying to warn me. 

I know this isnt normal at all I can tell something is not right with my brain at the moment but I dont know what. I feel maybe psychosis or early signs of schizophrenia.",0.3768846153846184,2.4553634833333327,2.1700000000000017,95.94576923076923,85.0,4.3589743589743595,15.897435897435901,5.369823440869387,-0.814948717948718,438,8,98,2,13,144,74,120,0.039,0.927,0.034,0.1158,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,6,0,11,1,1,1,1,23,25,4,0,2,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,1,0,0,11,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,5,12,2,16,24,3,13,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,3,10,61,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882598249110592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18659874873981708,0.0,0.10875989575610799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952934534277897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29873284579361914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2841756824315763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705405438669947,0.12047760949360516,0.0,0.0,0.15413538863874984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303692539012243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780430776768858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16477955760695087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16942317773699722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165232984980499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16098751178679582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080361423018821,0.1733916761361383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14401902498978505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12982856082118752,0.0,0.0,0.11936540907627408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474002120815344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4322349714428184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144965924001531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946919886851964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SingleHouse,2020/04/02,"I think i have a mental illness. It's been about a year since i'm sure that i might have a mental illness. Information is entering slow in my mind. In rare cases when i really struggle in high pressure (rare) moments the information enters my brain fast. When i have lucid dreams or dreams in general, it's very hard for me to control them, i can feel the struggle days after the dream like it happened in real life. My brain is quite slow, i lose concentration very easy, also i'm not the brightest. My mom has schizophrenia and i heard that it's possible to transmit it to the children. My mom's symptoms got more severe through the years. I don't like interactions with other people, even with my mom, because of her illness i even sometime shout to her to leave the room , she has an obsession with cleaning and doesn't leave my room until she doesn't clean it. I even feel disgusted about her. . .  .Also i'm addicted to games and tech stuff when it's something about it i can remember it very easily.

Sorry if all of this is hard to understand, it's raw and i didn't spent much time on fixing the mistakes in it.",3.8886877828054303,5.416049723981904,4.803981900452492,83.77484162895931,72.12217194570134,7.7339366515837105,27.47963800904977,8.313332769828598,1.8426271493212671,883,32,173,14,17,287,119,221,0.18600000000000005,0.725,0.09,-0.951,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,1,3,11,10,1,4,12,0,16,8,2,1,2,25,27,12,0,2,3,3,4,2,0,1,6,2,4,1,16,7,0,1,7,4,1,2,5,7,0,0,5,6,27,3,26,21,3,25,0,1,0,0,15,10,0,3,15,115,43,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253096130135586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18384675936399555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07007085703149409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566385869013497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289232628431649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413155188998051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277649847179905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624170002306765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193392185450723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016475900905715,0.0,0.20594055222048946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12144821990223954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434253604316264,0.0,0.0,0.08119073515081153,0.11231496904465993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285967178128967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316798498477536,0.1219410070869526,0.11606408778502934,0.4038749528545056,0.0,0.0,0.08449955162528625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969004130275266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295859017981154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222606896784234,0.0,0.13083528565278446,0.0736382361657009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302129759064972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12985782294264095,0.0,0.0950856620438255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849211031702227,0.11368589977968285,0.12867418302458142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403359223824504,0.13158725122064244,0.0,0.0,0.10833654698347636,0.11947434223826744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07365364087427885,0.0,0.0,0.06702674269964433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196642782725701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28453088470234217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14804469033976533
mentalhealth,potatolover2007,2020/04/02,"My brother has a problem. He's 10 years older than me. When he's 11 or 12, his (our) mother left him. Since then, he has been to the hospital about two times, but he always want to get out. He was diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Until now, he would break things in his room, smash stuff and go on a rampage every now and then. I don't know what I should do. Hearing things fall, loud shouting and the sound of broken glasses terrifies me. I am just a 13 year old, I can't do anything.",1.6467555555555575,3.4093865200000018,3.139333333333333,92.34522222222223,78.8,6.044444444444442,23.11111111111111,6.937597516519254,0.6317777777777778,372,12,82,4,9,122,76,100,0.145,0.841,0.015,-0.9325,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,5,0,11,2,0,0,0,13,16,9,0,4,3,2,0,0,0,2,2,4,1,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,2,4,11,0,10,12,0,19,0,0,0,0,13,5,0,1,11,53,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19973805859260824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975379555294285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436423163934701,0.0,0.0,0.275114279682158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20224967201043284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12541447714662654,0.0,0.1364240540389863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27055004235791696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13192337168273005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608114085579529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518885992307852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22969224350613926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19856908541607549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27479600568227897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3189526814427842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13997314327109164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344907157576333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158574494594572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17052226659297945,0.0,0.0,0.30916436957576243
mentalhealth,D3V1L-2P01NT0,2020/04/02,Can someone help me understand why I crave human blood I've been having craving for human blood for as long as I remember. I've thought about trying to buy a blood bag from a donation clinic many times but I've never actually tried.,3.569565217391304,5.657084434782611,5.0558695652173915,79.29728260869571,74.21739130434783,8.078260869565218,26.71739130434783,8.841846274778883,2.2871478260869567,188,7,34,4,4,63,34,46,0.0,0.9540000000000001,0.046,0.2144,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,3,4,3,0,1,5,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,7,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,17,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.30085949365088105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066491662385718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728386699141273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125711001234469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23778246868492997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3492474762370865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612243388405027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447583385676728,0.17977410135417474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4186353313307085,0.0,0.0,0.3209545507387658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781957249333842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,12throwaway59,2020/04/02,"I think I need an in-patient facility, but I could use some advice (sorry, long post) So, 40 year-old male, USA. I think I've reached a breaking point that probably requires in-patient care. Can anyone direct me toward the cheapest services available in the US? I'm beyond broke with no real assets or resources. I have Medicare or whatever the super-poor-person insurance is called.

Backstory, just to get off my chest and in case it's relevant. I've had pretty severe anxiety for as long as I can remember.  It got a little better after HS (pretty bad time for me), and I lived and worked pretty normally for most of my 20's, other than avoiding almost all human contact, whenever possible.

The anxiety began getting worse in my later 20's, and by very early 30's it had turned into severe anxiety, panic attacks, deep depression, and agoraphobia where I wouldn't leave my room (and later my own place) for days and sometimes weeks at a time. I started self-medicating with a large amount of pot and booze. That worked for a while until it didn't.

A roommate at the time convinced me to see a doctor (quite a few, actually). I tried every SSRI I've ever heard of, nothing worked. Finally Klonopin helped with the panic attacks, and eventually that, along with Prozac and Gabapentin, and still the weed and booze let me rejoin the world on a small scale.

I tried talk therapy along with seeing a psychiatrist, and more doctors. Talk therapy didn't work for me, unsurprisingly with my avoidant personality. I never felt like any of the doctors took me seriously because I don't self-harm and have never attempted suicide, although I was diagnosed with severe anxiety with panic disorder, severe depression, agoraphobia, and an ""unknown"" personality disorder. 

That brings us to now. I'm the kind of drunk that drinks every day, heavily (two periods of sobriety for less than 2 weeks each in the past 8-9 years), often to the point of blackout. I'm feeling the effects of that on my body pretty seriously at this point. The depression is worse than it's ever been; I don't want to be here, I hate myself and my life, and I don't blame anyone but me for it.

I've been isolated for so long, I don't have anyone to reach out to, and out-patient treatment doesn't work for me because I just lie about my drinking and I can't fully describe how I feel. I also don't really trust doctors at this point, and I'm more scared of being poked with needles or getting locked up than I am of dying.

I know I need pretty serious help at this point, I just don't know how to get it with no resources, even if I could overcome the fear of doing so. Any directions would be greatly appreciated, just please no sympathy, it just makes me feel more pathetic. Thank you for reading if anyone took the time, and again, sorry for the long post.",7.654690476190478,6.935759035185188,8.145502645502646,71.01333333333336,63.27777777777778,11.047619047619053,35.58201058201058,10.371327730470783,3.6534788359788366,2229,88,400,45,28,742,263,540,0.22,0.677,0.10300000000000001,-0.9972,0,2,2,0,0,1,84.0,2,1,0,10,22,26,3,7,29,0,32,14,2,5,5,83,66,39,2,10,12,0,4,1,0,2,7,1,1,4,18,36,5,3,10,4,0,3,16,18,0,1,13,7,49,8,70,45,11,66,0,4,2,0,14,29,0,9,32,264,67,12,0.0,0.0,0.056740777328953024,0.0,0.0,0.05681826541608189,0.0,0.0,0.05822345403776622,0.0,0.0,0.046498244449267936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908069276923692,0.0,0.17792194974493264,0.0,0.0,0.16262432585019188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322958350985272,0.0,0.0,0.04854834240615677,0.0708888609250775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05142420552041538,0.0,0.06458558289159247,0.0,0.0,0.059372174376229735,0.0,0.059282331598960215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284752124195754,0.0,0.0,0.07499696014460097,0.0,0.15023966951222445,0.05901558166486558,0.06034495237504689,0.0,0.1332775806771816,0.23805399522211465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391921488727888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03840398374181685,0.10519030431712327,0.0979787272745193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542888073738191,0.0881990251267316,0.0,0.055827968913155834,0.0636946067152279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215126900378053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04650357706993602,0.0641046665235953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05740579038703375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794624782798347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060548690917738214,0.06390954272880349,0.0,0.0,0.061566774163752815,0.0,0.059456829789900675,0.041069275989615774,0.028406532179393536,0.05827620047504816,0.05134277889917197,0.2058246928287334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03881199606985094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458558289159247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622702177941369,0.08968945566355638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569693980626126,0.055791346468073766,0.0,0.06101301456330845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466060736046265,0.0,0.0,0.0555056343209797,0.0,0.15230896039055042,0.06074876922666544,0.0638253498862257,0.2748273754148845,0.06554934076436743,0.11137297736509807,0.29576999122973835,0.06268975192831121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06184397761342049,0.058160370823238265,0.0661813253159183,0.037248942737864194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06586653803540132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058212924108786424,0.0,0.09266749385515836,0.0,0.12131507256684762,0.26274755413585754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057506531816800835,0.13017631939306432,0.04115507267132778,0.0,0.046434381465169816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360079459218612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346891196903884,0.0,0.05353176890486328,0.13298691737738885,0.0,0.0,0.07451347001815067,0.0,0.0,0.13561841949101466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920166016022766,0.07895278233975928,0.06324466737958688,0.05679886068353879,0.0,0.13988167603742366,0.05021829688337627,0.0,0.047975414147539135,0.03429521282314582,0.0,0.09328023963222533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21164993775096244,0.0,0.11850870315860865,0.041304281205174376,0.0,0.0,0.07488647855038243
mentalhealth,thirdeyelevation,2020/04/02,"Mental Health Hospitals, open or not? I am currently trying to get help and admitted to a inpatient but don't know the conditions right now with the pandemic going on. Anyone know pls comment or feel free to message me privately.",6.316428571428574,7.9851625476190495,7.289047619047621,67.73928571428571,66.3809523809524,12.266666666666667,35.42857142857143,11.855464076750405,5.2122285714285725,185,9,29,7,3,62,37,42,0.0,0.7959999999999999,0.204,0.7876,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,11,8,4,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,5,8,0,6,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,2,18,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778362751507112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20091203850776734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20759891244528053,0.0,0.2258230939061212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4223643418409037,0.0,0.0,0.2663352489891425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43674620523163343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4004352216532324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33933462669340914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.269774485992591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thesingletaco,2020/04/02,"Do eating disorders cause long term side effects? TW// Anorexia/starvation

Hi everyone, I don’t know if this is the right subreddit to be posting this but I thought it would be a good place to start?

For a bit of background, I started starving myself at 14. I had body dysmorphia and would literally fall apart if I ate anything. I just felt ugly and a disappointment to myself because I would get hungry and eat. It took me years before I could step on a weighing scale confidently and not fall apart. I don’t know if you could call it anorexia. I wasn’t properly diagnosed. My parents never took me to see a therapist. They just kinda tried to deal with it as best they could but honestly all they would do is panic and freak out at me for not eating. I also didn’t get very very skinny— like, I was but not skin and bone. It was like this until about 18/19. I’m 23 now. I don’t think it’s fair to call myself anorexic without being properly diagnosed so I just say that I starved myself. I don’t wanna be disrespectful to actual people going through this. 
 

I wanted to know if there are any long term effects with starving yourself during those prime teenage years? I know it sounds stupid but I’m convinced it’s stunted my growth and I’m shorter then I’m meant to be, fucked up my metabolism and messed up the way I digest food. I’ve never brought it up with a doctor but would like too. I just wanted to know if people have gone through the same thing and that I’m not crazy?

I also never went to therapy to recover? I ended up getting really sick one day and would vomit anything they put in my mouth. Until I was vomiting bile and it was like that for a week and a few days. I was never sent to hospital. Slowly after that, I started to eat more and more. I don’t know if that bit of information helps.",2.4135730446024546,4.5188101730769255,3.88639301874596,86.26743051066582,77.76373626373626,6.809825468648999,24.16742081447964,7.827709963407826,1.3233477052359408,1429,49,285,23,34,472,179,364,0.124,0.745,0.131,-0.3056,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,4,3,11,14,2,1,11,0,33,19,4,3,5,70,66,31,0,18,20,1,2,4,0,6,7,2,0,0,21,17,8,0,13,0,0,12,16,6,0,1,18,5,42,8,40,34,10,50,0,1,1,1,14,14,1,7,26,197,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.08262825976307668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542532202570529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057580282928608416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13935669799935765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05161564125979168,0.0,0.07205016040990961,0.0,0.08885868737969939,0.0,0.184881134921712,0.09405218911925498,0.0,0.0,0.17292041730822436,0.0,0.0,0.08698210153417607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028125837718359,0.0,0.0,0.10921366600853973,0.08729374989326831,0.0,0.17188184728605502,0.0,0.0,0.09704215447158884,0.08666601111584582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34656490185376804,0.0,0.0,0.07499480626445122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090831385705649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812989905065569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238646425639017,0.0,0.0,0.07827846977658026,0.13271384253442414,0.0,0.048121399372605074,0.07101937365353475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056754270176356536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792031346690997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16546705423363547,0.0,0.0,0.14986520263998876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612189677139212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05737635644523746,0.0,0.0,0.0993450720059154,0.09401892055733546,0.0,0.0,0.11740266233684335,0.0,0.08846486284189106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109296116053395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851193665539109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054243446447704895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230995204970386,0.0,0.0673350633388983,0.0,0.0,0.0674731129383932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17979514180110995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683051652997562,0.0983114341725102,0.05625272417240045,0.05425479387437207,0.0,0.06722059966575868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18814878540785465,0.05748714870758768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13972755288289926,0.0998842062861524,0.06720918197958411,0.06791926577255948,0.0,0.0,0.07849236401343744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162138098466869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36089398532157424,0.0,0.0,0.10905277815511458
mentalhealth,poshjeck1995,2020/04/02,"How many people are we going to lose to suicide due to this quarantine? I've noticed a lot of people around me are suffering from huge anxiety and depression from being stuck indoors all day. Luckily my anxiety and depressions are basically cured, so I try my best to help those around me mentally.



But it got me thinking. What about those who can't get help and end up doing something drastic. Do you think that's a consequence no one has addressed?",5.7123921568627445,7.151929905882351,6.316176470588236,75.01112745098041,67.58823529411765,10.372549019607844,34.166666666666664,10.504223727775694,3.9404901960784318,362,17,63,10,6,118,67,85,0.23800000000000002,0.615,0.146,-0.8270000000000001,0,1,1,0,0,1,7.0,1,1,0,2,5,5,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,1,1,12,14,6,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,7,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,2,0,8,1,11,11,3,8,0,4,0,0,5,4,0,1,3,47,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035758662773688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532651630553245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082256747666609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12796210460095284,0.0,0.34179135204535105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17573795651158752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366433201413014,0.0,0.11276456079370192,0.0,0.15869164781794198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659885386977049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22197709661514856,0.0,0.16868645030297055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201162994446796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999569712512536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258982826572929,0.0,0.0,0.13445202589377306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751137711502661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527505682540061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21703523755142293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25427431795257843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134711649283079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Colorofsky,2020/04/02,"I don't know what to? Looking for help. Ocd has taken my life away. It seems like I am rarely happy or at peace. I don't have access to mental health care. You might think how is that even possible? I don't seem to find help. I have searched the internet and I can't find a single ocd therapist near me. I am constantly giving into ocd, obeying it like a slave. I am tired. I don't know why I am posting this. I feel alone. May be someone somewhere might relate to what I am talking about.
I would like to have some friends. But well, I am no fun. :(",-0.7515517241379293,1.4073075517241378,1.2754310344827609,98.83142241379312,94.17241379310344,4.279310344827587,17.594827586206893,5.985473137389443,-0.4164206896551721,420,12,98,4,16,138,74,116,0.105,0.6459999999999999,0.249,0.9506,0,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,0,4,8,0,0,3,0,21,3,0,2,0,19,31,4,0,1,2,0,1,3,1,4,3,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,8,0,0,0,6,0,1,0,1,2,17,8,11,25,2,6,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,7,4,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17279666597563526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675234540195207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701052300284338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18029554350423516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019671986930707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08435967936709518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049787849821445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890072385756854,0.0,0.0,0.16004881815126032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17760504531965576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17734388003044085,0.0,0.0,0.22365963110777848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833825892753148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178445322727043,0.2445298401912349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401041821213285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813620108011793,0.3539832696016872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18808783980302296,0.1597872875665863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3037710447725662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14136359784290012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13410024827093384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19371493133798115,0.0,0.10690479452967942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917588605878856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500098410795521,0.0,0.1505477964100005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851885825098918,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DatSonicBoom,2020/04/02,"How do I maintain hope and work ethic in an awful home environment? The family I live with has a very awful dynamic where my mother gets whatever she wants or else she throws tantrums or yells at the top of her lungs. This means that she has the power to control every other member of the family and gets to project her trauma onto the rest of us instead of working on it like a healthy person would. None of us want to hurt her back or deny her of this behaviour because we’re peaceful people.

This has affected every aspect of my life; my motivation to work, my happiness, my stress, my anxiety, my personal goals (have been lowered significantly over time because I’m finding it harder to achieve in such a hopeless and hostile environment), my social life, etc.

However, I *did* have a solution; avoid my family when I can. I used to attend the library as frequently as possible and complete as much of my homework there are as I can. Away from the apathetic and harsh family and the home which I associate with so much stress, the library was a magnificent place to study and relax. It was a little stressful having to get as much study done there as possible so I didn’t have to do it at home, but I had all day and reminded myself that I tried my hardest at the end of each day.

And then - you probably guessed it - coronavirus happened and I’m stuck at home; I’m back to square one all over again. I have to live in a house with a mother whom I have to wrestle and struggle against for basic personal boundaries such as organising my own schedule.

Sometimes I can calmly form compelling arguments disguised as me actually caring about what she thinks (after 3 years of this particular bullshit pattern she’s gotten into, I really don’t give a shit anymore and I will run away as soon as I can get a house) and other times I can’t say anything to soothe her anger and attain the autonomy I deserve.

In either case, she always has a sizeable amount of control over what I do and I’ve 100% lost the motivation to do any work at all. How do I maintain hope and work ethic in an awful home environment (which I’m now stuck in)?",7.160395256916993,6.572405241545898,7.852955643390428,72.27802371541503,64.21739130434783,10.908915239350023,35.484848484848484,10.33465798735191,3.612486956521739,1686,69,311,35,22,565,208,414,0.157,0.75,0.094,-0.9735,3,1,0,0,0,1,39.0,2,1,0,15,17,22,4,5,25,3,31,4,2,9,3,48,54,36,0,5,5,2,0,1,0,2,2,2,6,3,18,21,0,3,5,1,0,3,4,13,0,1,11,3,48,9,62,41,14,42,0,3,1,0,23,23,1,6,17,235,66,11,0.0,0.0,0.07788493506703394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640992310902914,0.0,0.0,0.05427485233133419,0.0,0.061055911441546026,0.0,0.07915199292252519,0.0,0.0,0.0656784216801717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997187943157325,0.12274090227546182,0.0,0.0973052289734561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137358641456925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368129484302063,0.0,0.17903174218806525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294419015840016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167531911053444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667263003527837,0.0,0.07068968453431802,0.0,0.08901140430529994,0.0,0.0,0.1344899941621468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009583550846317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294666222257414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667937666512352,0.07656288011958412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792184393444882,0.0,0.07057743009991675,0.08496128837759265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4002893888800567,0.15854251888089144,0.0,0.18418451332692307,0.0854403265974239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274705932056862,0.03899207974267101,0.07999252572164803,0.14095080078089142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712415457633438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08693859434642849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17601286542044028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408263236976975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055331546126111235,0.2090661081601427,0.08338648445351449,0.0,0.0,0.17995192838200905,0.0,0.0,0.08605076433828754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05112956894536344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346965373495887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192580384118915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135821627405683,0.0,0.0,0.07893604401144533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742729039577111,0.08343676297358563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05114026496621254,0.0,0.0,0.0930779616810226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541870645360022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200786045071347,0.06893188595678627,0.0,0.06585320454868879,0.09415029365407916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905201943764004,0.0,0.0,0.056696108356167924,0.0,0.0,0.05139626908423768
mentalhealth,artbru97,2020/04/02,Suicidal Feeling really over the edge the last few days and more suicidal than ever. I don't know what to do and feel so lost. Any tips?,1.2355952380952395,3.4985608928571463,3.2214285714285715,88.59023809523809,82.92857142857143,8.019047619047619,20.047619047619047,8.841846274778883,1.4623190476190482,107,3,23,3,3,36,24,28,0.34299999999999997,0.615,0.042,-0.915,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,6,3,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,3,5,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,15,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142580111480604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20319371214440626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28499833026011995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31861713307604456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315391455172188,0.2568236306822393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34393549278630925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20184153954421105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6892696196540719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xo-o-xo,2020/04/02,"How do you keep yourself from being triggered? A lot of things trigger me. Brings up old memories and ignites my fear, insecurity, paranoia, and anger.

I just read something right now and I'm trying to prevent myself from obsessing over it and arguing in my head. I'm trying to distract myself but my mind is still wandering there. Lingering in the back of my mind ruining other things I'm focusing on. It's stirring up my worry and anger.",3.6756927710843392,6.212803963855425,5.089984939759038,77.04895331325305,75.6265060240964,8.005421686746987,30.856927710843372,8.841846274778883,3.0568084337349397,351,17,59,8,8,117,59,83,0.268,0.721,0.011000000000000001,-0.9661,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,6,8,3,4,2,0,3,1,1,4,0,16,8,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,8,0,0,0,0,10,0,12,7,1,12,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,1,4,45,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853875206379935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712994120022679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474334897703663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21429671538609574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20497073161786955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4868753558229712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25298912023194936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411606958326485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20589419866717354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185607057791752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925391393863795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203462106671213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273759719457006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448441345367413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisismyreadit,2020/04/02,"Mental Health and Employment? Hey all,

So I (21F, USA) have had a hard time staying in retail and food work because of my anxiety. I legit quit as soon as I start the job because my anxiety becomes too overwhelming since I feel trapped at the location and I don't have control over my life as an employee. 

Obviously this isn't normal for someone my age. I'm professionally diagnosed with OCD, general/social anxiety, and depression not otherwise specified. I'm not legally disabled. 

Would it be weird if I asked an employer to work with me in regards to my mental health issues? Is it even possible?",4.893829365079366,6.9160108035714325,6.436547619047619,71.08067460317463,70.42857142857143,10.692063492063493,35.65873015873015,10.746095033038511,4.6451753968253975,478,26,80,16,9,163,79,112,0.157,0.843,0.0,-0.9207,4,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,4,4,3,0,1,5,0,8,5,0,1,2,15,13,9,0,3,3,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,6,1,1,1,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,1,2,12,0,13,10,1,9,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,1,4,53,15,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3859740885040948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572265625809971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20504319277732136,0.18574273704114025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18862932862909695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485407682106116,0.17070020776556236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108198578776726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503738328718001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20336517202843785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065717096422335,0.0,0.0,0.3575371460140143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755373030858695,0.16689372395907207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11879123693162373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33897384824052085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647817035980602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895988444359367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17888122983534965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912108798703832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424992430366015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190394003993161,0.17925860340561678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806771250437242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24487558931689074,0.0,0.0,0.1194709801111394,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,freddyval,2020/04/02,"I live overseas, just ended a 10yr relationship, am between moving rooms, have high demands at school and a crush I’m worried I’m creeping out. Corona has now come along and isolated me. I’m [31m] feeling completely isolated in my ex’s country. 2 months following the breakup I don’t think about my ex which I think is strange. Instead I appear to have shifted all my anxieties towards a crush I developed 6 months ago. 

School has ramped up so much and my mental capacity is failing me. I’m usually a top student but I can’t stay focused. My main teacher [28f] is my crush and she has a boyfriend. She’s so nice to me and I’ve honestly felt that there were sparks developing between us, however inappropriate that is. Being isolated, I feel that I may have recently encroached slightly on her personal boundaries by suggesting we get a coffee sometime. Her immediate coldness and rejection towards me has shattered me like a ton of bricks. 

I get plenty of exercise each day between study sessions, but that my study and crush are so deeply entwined makes it hard to detach. I just wish I could reverse time and never had said anything to her, or have someone to open up to about all of this, but I’m ashamed. 

How do I correct things with my teacher professionally as I need her pedagogic support? How do I navigate to a lighter stage in my life? I’m struggling here.",3.6776149425287343,6.034226153256711,4.836690613026821,79.75549568965519,74.82375478927203,7.874904214559388,33.86350574712644,8.72156446121922,3.1744494252873565,1090,60,196,23,24,358,157,261,0.14300000000000002,0.7609999999999999,0.096,-0.7569,1,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,2,0,0,2,13,8,0,2,9,0,23,2,0,3,4,38,44,18,0,3,6,2,4,1,0,1,2,1,1,1,8,15,0,0,5,1,0,4,3,4,0,0,4,6,36,4,28,37,6,29,0,2,0,0,14,13,0,3,11,134,44,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092488872551026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12161815247157573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13082579742731135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369459403720482,0.16668598068478305,0.0,0.0,0.1269314327006903,0.0,0.0,0.10252801013980056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408078043367357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16076865915771488,0.0,0.15264433523108809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611945727252822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241355055938254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679695622732608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229124852471037,0.07766888721115983,0.0,0.1403809686534022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611941387819164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16021298211611065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537903171902725,0.1689690347633907,0.1168675235438704,0.11788057737645476,0.12261405531605797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13881393419320726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569721347634914,0.17068346223877595,0.0,0.0,0.15122500287344753,0.0,0.0,0.3217895518245286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13470200603784055,0.0,0.15723384696792073,0.0,0.0,0.16944997716286908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16619889411971592,0.0,0.0,0.1804069699085281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561828176133747,0.20373406588327325,0.0,0.0,0.09270166858702657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912316162079768,0.0,0.17509240799120904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828174819567584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145043036569007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,31calvin,2020/04/02,"How do I deal with trama? I have certain things that seem to set triggers for me. Hi, thank you so much for reading. Growing up I went through a lot of shit, I’m sure some people had it worse but I feel like I went through it. 

For example growing up my dad would get on top of me and choke me for ligit just living. Years latter I find that it’s not the choking that leaves the mental scares but the screaming of my mother for him to get off me. Now when I hear someone screaming even if I know it’s a joke or a movie it like triggers me and makes me think of it and actually makes me like made idk it’s hard to explain.  

I also went through a lot of other stuff but I don’t really wanna go to in depth for the sake of the readers. What kinda therapy do you think could help with this. I really wanna get over the past in my life and I feel like this is a good step.",0.910103254067586,2.5098144095744708,2.719749687108888,95.26029411764708,80.43617021276594,5.487359198998751,20.63329161451815,6.2272716619740125,-0.03511364205256573,671,18,159,5,17,223,106,188,0.109,0.7090000000000001,0.182,0.9148,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,1,7,13,1,1,11,0,8,2,1,6,2,37,28,13,0,5,7,2,3,4,0,1,1,3,0,0,16,6,0,0,8,2,0,7,2,4,0,0,5,6,25,9,30,21,4,21,0,0,0,0,10,9,1,7,8,111,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.13658677692649454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193088359092744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11175158562360876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442989599192436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244632533004908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14154218696814916,0.1999836982074945,0.0,0.0,0.12792652997594034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21937961730385552,0.0,0.0795459914119342,0.11739697017084468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253821827318934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577520291234794,0.0,0.09381636334144394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692173836080955,0.0,0.0,0.14820394863532166,0.0,0.0,0.09886223457259424,0.2735215734918948,0.0,0.12359267917024384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379884395002086,0.0,0.1324393601079176,0.1868569906447044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14105296385632676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289122864254033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361353245498667,0.09703490849957784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14000403183659432,0.0,0.17933180587176512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013053845542872,0.0,0.0,0.12741993075746416,0.0,0.0,0.14367324674725954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859286893031135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16022776087411755,0.0,0.0,0.1319164446629384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886203048470174,0.160063496422166,0.0,0.09298729405743446,0.17936932108603498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38925008385789794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142637469595552,0.09942794069198654,0.0,0.0,0.09013361485402603
mentalhealth,fagioli999,2020/04/02,"My mom called me bipolar So I know I’m pretty shitty and I’ve been trying to work on my mental health but as you guys know it’s been hard. 

So I came down to eat and mom came out right after I put my phone on the charger (my charger is broken rn) and said she’s taking it I argued then she went in started mocking me to to my stepdad. So I got up and kinda threw my plate on the table (it legit was a soft ass throw like one potato slice fell off my plate) and yelled well you might as well come grab my knife because I knew if I came up to my room I’d cut. She followed and I threw my knife on my bed, she grabbed and we started screaming at each other. She said my only copping is to run away which is true because it’s better than talking. I started to ignore her so she sat down even tho I told her to get out 50 times and said if she doesn’t I’ll leave she said she’d call the cops cause we’re under quarantine. Then I told her that I’d rather die than talk and it’s easier. Then she said it seems like I’m bipolar and she should’ve called my dad I said ya you should have, my dad lives across the country and she wanted to call him a few months ago to come get me because of another fight, then she left cause “she doesn’t know how to talk to me”
I know I suck hard here but is she being shitty too? What do I do? Can’t leave at this moment because of corona but my grandparents said as soon as the quarantine is lifted I can stay at their place for awhile.",0.2980549065420561,2.113081760124615,1.9969538551401875,98.61215975467293,83.42367601246106,4.635552959501559,17.196359034267914,5.3872612403679225,-0.7684603582554517,1139,23,275,5,32,372,158,321,0.15,0.775,0.075,-0.9768,2,2,0,0,1,0,17.0,1,4,1,2,13,13,5,0,7,0,19,5,1,3,1,41,55,30,1,5,6,4,5,2,0,2,3,9,2,1,11,20,1,1,6,0,0,13,3,7,2,1,21,14,60,6,40,30,2,49,0,0,0,1,49,22,2,5,15,172,71,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316993654418437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655418009166357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07755244583994059,0.0,0.0,0.20127129241852454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300312187008466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33714504971469755,0.2832237257539323,0.0,0.16959006578012634,0.0,0.1422080351828235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566724304046025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446272777073957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05451928089171108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625126659535864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601767144236458,0.0,0.0,0.08173115884457638,0.0,0.0,0.14788573617763964,0.0,0.0,0.08774000552169353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814552539714001,0.0,0.0,0.1748035452153008,0.0896838819666047,0.0,0.0,0.08065328417277984,0.0,0.07288752654889409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318455200503062,0.08756573394048899,0.0,0.19334817445328012,0.06588552800105618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055933691484498164,0.06277814069005183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862405118062791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397653399501287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297913431861975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049179836065925,0.5496251779902148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514460927859659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17527439201395353,0.08798051351007538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06206252770322865,0.19903629922384572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04813184718041141,0.0,0.0,0.15774792775943808,0.0,0.056041697998071065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048686364251065664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484332505003167,0.07651876042018975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060092736652179325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CiviLsinisterR,2020/04/02,"Please help. Why am I furiously hurting myself constantly in every dream I have, every night? I have been diagnosed with a lot of mental illnesses, so I'll just name the important ones. I was diagnosed with Severe depression, Severe anger issues, Generalised Anxiety Disorder and ADHD when I was around 11, not all at once ofc.

Anyway I havent self-harmed or attempted suicide in well over 2 years now, I still feel like it every now and again but its not as strong, I can resist.

But every single time I go to sleep I go into a normal dream and every single time I end up getting absolutely furious. Always at different things, losing stuff, tripping over, someone not listening, just being in school, and I end up screaming so loud and angrily, like pure rage, (I used to do it when I blacked out in anger irl?), then trying to hurt myself, punching desks, walls, door hinges, cars, smashing my head against said things, and I get even more angry because I cant hurt myself enough because Im dreaming, which makes it worse so I start stabbing myself through my hand and shit, I've been attacking people that piss me off too, beating the shit outta people, swearing at them, losing my shit at irl friends. Why is this happening? Life hasnt recently gotten harder or anything its kinda just the same as usual. When I get angry in my dreams I genuinely feel angry as if I'm awake you know? Im so sick of feeling angry all night, after finally being able to be awake without getting angry.

What does this mean? How can I get it to stop? Please help I dont want it to seep into my real life and turn me back into what I used to be...",5.983568922305764,6.288628092063494,6.57166248955723,77.47593984962408,66.49206349206351,9.298245614035087,30.229741019214696,9.134995656068208,2.5283650793650785,1279,43,234,21,19,419,182,315,0.32899999999999996,0.58,0.091,-0.9986,1,0,0,0,0,6,47.0,0,1,1,5,21,22,10,0,5,0,19,13,7,4,3,47,42,25,1,3,12,0,4,2,1,0,6,4,1,0,16,15,0,1,5,4,0,4,8,17,1,1,6,9,35,5,37,32,8,47,0,6,1,0,8,20,4,5,25,158,51,2,0.08448413021840108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015335067678435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07029756422427337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646301283738435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06952324065532675,0.07520878757012854,0.0,0.09611289464847116,0.0,0.06496308124381353,0.0,0.10300148325558203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912973312289719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07276605756130014,0.17149922758941386,0.0,0.08826793454772609,0.09682613259207336,0.0,0.07393263168262956,0.0,0.09901477141099646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965572631025115,0.08729469054715651,0.0,0.05580097122044523,0.0,0.3559076173983045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815314410752432,0.060355479508753127,0.0,0.0925482351025978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527222943479043,0.0,0.220697355426156,0.0,0.09602855628132446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07470903733900731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867050912762376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11325586327272068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713260262234223,0.0,0.18251471637081268,0.08817948228188636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04643026851715182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11934727933163394,0.08254935713291706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890322630216224,0.0,0.07182538633059783,0.0,0.0,0.05639381295080525,0.0,0.0,0.0920279851792988,0.0,0.0,0.08514013238065404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585652661960674,0.08277650993473577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997284141886637,0.057248633102464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714131669879335,0.0,0.0,0.1854764097433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616143611849602,0.0,0.0,0.08341788634925862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036375450885139,0.0,0.0,0.08550245017347037,0.0,0.0,0.08813537312195298,0.19088603939039864,0.2601652367988449,0.0,0.0,0.08454514364686347,0.0,0.07158312937268617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059798302206016125,0.0,0.06746913552501506,0.07063251581151593,0.0,0.0,0.09671411644900553,0.09241192612972728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225500421008944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852675146745546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057359178734338226,0.09189447344891516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145934325874521,0.09304733360755522,0.0,0.04983092891114917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596137920249592,0.0,0.15246757371252256,0.0,0.0,0.08143968670732123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860965463737195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054405009939636616
mentalhealth,pinkmonstah3,2020/04/02,"Quarantine I'm not good. I'm really not doing well.
I was getting ok with my routine everyday but since I can't get out because of this situation, I'm a disaster. 
I run, I write, I do exercise in my house, I study, but I'm feeling so alone, so small and fragile. 
Everyday the razor is becoming appealing, not to commit suicide but concentrate in something else. 
I'm so mad with everybody in my house that the only thing I want to do is sleep.
Also, I'm afraid that when this is over and everything is normal again my crazy manic side is gonna come out and make me feel even worse. 
So that's that. 
I don't want any advice, I just wanted to express what I'm feeling.
Stay safe people of the internet. 
And my my first language is not English.
Xoxo",1.981540616246498,3.896785627450985,4.174103641456587,84.60132352941179,78.34640522875817,7.770121381886089,25.96125116713352,8.634040054169528,2.0027800186741365,583,23,119,13,14,201,91,153,0.19399999999999998,0.705,0.102,-0.9594,0,2,1,0,0,2,20.0,0,0,0,1,10,6,1,1,4,1,12,2,1,1,1,28,30,13,1,4,8,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,9,0,1,3,1,0,2,6,2,1,1,1,4,16,4,13,28,0,16,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,5,75,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735076743381023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838965941227529,0.0,0.1419931107737326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207455647137078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823774102848656,0.19609891942732996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529505405299587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14832696946666954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11727541936672575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595777289591593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693360597434855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15103078911197185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855335084293055,0.0,0.0,0.14892727060827454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4097563073486133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11852137908795354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396919272174313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504090032134822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230963972539958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11374823533719974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14687785621340405,0.19958269087788136,0.17768628322678992,0.0,0.0,0.13669286384285415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892532595667944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19421969106121548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796168065555368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31418501995610376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964601344400234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18094682513886434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uzidoobs,2020/04/02,I self harmed for the first time today... I had been sitting in bed totally dissociated for a few hours. Then I just pick up a box of matches and start burning my legs. I’ve battled with depression and anxiety for awhile now but I have never done anything like this. Any ideas on how to prevent something like this from happening again?,3.5528645833333314,5.955391890625003,4.241875000000004,83.64895833333338,75.40625,7.3916666666666675,29.416666666666664,8.344100000000001,2.2973729166666668,267,12,50,5,6,85,54,64,0.19899999999999998,0.7829999999999999,0.018000000000000002,-0.8601,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,1,0,3,0,4,1,1,2,2,11,6,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,3,0,5,2,10,3,2,13,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,11,36,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944253122717602,0.0,0.2187166641300324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352755852144725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24624969456416115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29258024187738896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24319078224835103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528249879473662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28155899047317906,0.0,0.0,0.3227521240919754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27935763818623843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22050768416705924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29826143450599657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22010375951267536,0.0,0.0,0.20236514313396547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667135974408177,0.0,0.27100466078348784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JamesThrowaway442,2020/04/02,"I'm going crazy I'm stuck here in the quarantine with my girlfriend who's verbally and emotionally abusive. I can't get out and I don't know what to do, I just want to die, end my life and get it over with. I wish I could just get in my car and drive to the other side of the country, chill out by the beaches in Florida but due to this world's situation that just not an option right now, so I just want to end it to get away from this abuse. What do I do? I got nowhere else to go?",0.8369444444444447,2.040852509259264,2.9659259259259265,95.17166666666668,79.46296296296295,6.651851851851853,21.259259259259263,7.3871296695380915,0.32149259259259244,373,10,96,5,9,127,64,108,0.147,0.8109999999999999,0.042,-0.9211,0,1,0,0,1,2,9.0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,0,0,20,20,6,1,4,6,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,9,8,0,0,1,1,0,4,3,0,0,0,2,0,11,0,19,17,0,18,0,0,0,0,2,10,0,1,4,63,20,0,0.0,0.4727972342866973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18745564181112326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15930051381536195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20707029742791744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666733883961378,0.22443318606620494,0.3534310627840721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4169639361220083,0.0,0.2267836690309377,0.0,0.15957439945408938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965099399770016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092690207898034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17038902075880402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22426888025451372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353641734773849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294381950199471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Farnham4775,2020/04/02,"Having a hard time talking to others. When I started 8th grade which was last year, I've realised that I was significantly less social than I was and had a hard time talking to anyone who isn't my friend. It got worse as I was mercilessly bullied. I had to move schools and I did make a new friend group but I have a hard time talking to people even in my friend group. I've been in trouble with my parents for not making enough eye contact when talking to strangers. They also tell me to stop being shy and talk to others. This doesn't help. I also have anger outbursts and I try to control that by isolating myself in my room. I get in trouble for being angry which just makes it even worse. I've been told this is a normal part of puberty but I am very doubtful.

TL DR I can't talk to people even in my friend group and sometimes have anger outbursts.",3.055837438423648,4.6283770632183945,3.905418719211824,89.1993103448276,74.34482758620689,5.8909688013136305,25.072249589490966,6.1826913282559595,0.6755284072249585,675,22,139,4,14,216,94,174,0.3,0.7,0.0,-0.9947,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,8,9,2,1,5,0,20,2,1,4,0,17,27,12,0,1,4,1,3,0,4,0,1,0,1,0,11,6,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,11,4,20,4,21,14,3,17,0,0,1,0,21,6,0,1,10,96,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18179107975882053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947518272332882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748170943762135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744333254460387,0.0,0.22521823417706435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35126022439116034,0.0,0.05938375574176994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090596417478608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30545674683474244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07618530937903413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264978134458443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22761100198626044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208048238666042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977556393936852,0.0,0.0,0.11136472472968226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620831045638986,0.12308497743288713,0.0,0.15759797675595608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11503211279129047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586419660171166,0.0,0.0,0.11241472270600722,0.0,0.08045061901892075,0.0,0.0,0.0950266046069862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.548143740650446,0.09934568479468067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19883185273818746,0.0,0.0,0.10860900692374216,0.0,0.07716910456247313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378313571895552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316627795650056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319466549894714
mentalhealth,OpeningLeek,2020/04/02,"Can you meet the criteria without actually having the disorder? I just randomly began to think about the possibility that I have bipolar disorder. That is what I was initially diagnosed with and my therapist acted like it was a no-brainer. My psychiatrist did not agree, though. I do fit all the criteria for mixed episodes or rapid cycling, and many people in my family are diagnosed with BD (but they’re the stereotype – all criminals with addictions, battery charges because of their temper) and I’m not quite that bad. I could always at least manage it enough to not get into legal issues. Though I have laid hands on my partner and I absolutely hated myself for it, but I did it over and over out of impulsivity. I’m not suggesting that those with BD have to be violent, I’m just stating that it can present like that and for much of my family it does.
Anyway,
I tried probably 6 antipsychotics and mood stabilizers and they all made me far worse. Latuda in particular made me very suicidal and also caused akathisia. All of the antipsychotics did, actually, but Latuda was the worst. 
I got very fed up with this process and asked my psychiatrist if I could try an antidepressant, and because she knows I’m familiar with mania, she trusted that I’d let her know if it happened. Again, she was veering more toward major depressive disorder, while the therapist kept insisting it was bipolar. 
She prescribed Wellbutrin. I am not kidding when I say that within the first week I felt better than I had my entire life. Mood swings were gone, energy level was up, I no longer lashed out at my loved ones (or anyone), my once crippling anxiety became non-existent, and I haven’t had one dissociative episode since being on it (it’s been almost a year) and I used to have them constantly. 
After getting my mood issues figured out, I was still left with a major issue: I could not seem to, for the life of me, do well in school. I now had the drive and energy I had lacked before (minus the periods of what was either hypomania or hyperfocusing) but it was like I would read the same paragraph as everyone else and not get the same story from it at all. I felt like I was always missing information. So my psychiatrist tested me for ADD. According to the tests, I really do not meet the criteria. She gave me adderall anyway, “just to see what would happen.” Well, it worked. I went from failing to straight A’s with very minimal effort, suggesting that it really was my brain misinterpreting things rather than me not devoting enough time to studying. I want to add that I’ve never gotten a high from adderall, before someone calls me out for just being a speed freak since I don’t know if I have ADD.
So this is the dilemma I always come back to:
Is it actually bipolar? I meet the criteria, and prior to Wellbutrin I was textbook bipolar 2. And then I don’t have any typical symptoms of ADD other than my comprehension issue. Though that doesn’t even really count before ADD/ADHD is more of a focus related issue. I have always been organized, I do not forget appointments, I do not get distracted in the middle of something and realize hours later I never finished what I was doing, etc. I’ve seen people with true ADD and oh my godddddd do they cause me anxiety. So disorganized. 
But Wellbutrin and Adderall, two medications that could very likely cause mania in a person with bipolar disorder, work perfectly for me.

Any thoughts?",5.792535211267606,7.236074920187796,6.6046510172143975,73.00228169014085,67.40375586854461,9.99924882629108,31.25790297339593,10.203070172399654,3.4010396870109534,2730,109,469,69,45,902,293,639,0.115,0.8,0.086,-0.9583,0,0,1,0,0,0,77.0,0,1,4,8,23,26,3,1,28,0,60,16,2,6,9,110,97,42,1,12,29,0,3,5,1,2,12,1,0,3,36,41,1,1,11,1,0,5,19,10,2,4,37,6,74,13,69,50,19,57,0,3,2,1,25,28,0,9,28,357,110,10,0.0,0.0,0.19057041756241352,0.07096331767010708,0.07823171572654476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518338586008604,0.0,0.0,0.05205656483016719,0.2166575049254032,0.0,0.0,0.08853386313214084,0.0,0.09959521720989027,0.0,0.0,0.04551603970134418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608551744189922,0.0,0.0,0.05005414927908328,0.05435172798019566,0.07936279376115456,0.0,0.16617352458015858,0.0,0.0,0.057571366838033176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533542264404975,0.06646942225735693,0.0,0.0,0.20061193903095426,0.0,0.05607370446017313,0.0,0.07034472747630112,0.0,0.20789270933123932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056066353964245454,0.13214040612991218,0.0,0.0,0.2984187081083991,0.0,0.05696520103393705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05437864175261309,0.0,0.0,0.13452137393297856,0.07259829504331475,0.042994730082203135,0.0,0.0,0.062201201704359624,0.0,0.0,0.1227318208756978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500309710552995,0.0,0.0,0.055369898031793055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603810856864745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05206253490316263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512684545945527,0.0,0.0,0.06426798009912088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877659584232483,0.0,0.0,0.06410560650491197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3397121014722607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732376975946273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072606672008724,0.0665641972339648,0.0919572535868124,0.15901100154546915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058750910853234375,0.12318920237814487,0.0,0.06599626107371558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06557651135444842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04785242233824463,0.0,0.10041077934515084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932420613703721,0.08822031136668378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025755614614032,0.05683857075103604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338499651955645,0.0,0.0,0.07018357733922165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923670061352427,0.06511276178630293,0.0,0.12510485237379795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05176627291872992,0.0,0.06587976313266129,0.05187240355690586,0.05926017622064932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769475508249056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05515490606174995,0.050113423740647436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05198506777449706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071203524480383,0.0,0.0,0.06765878130007398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116096369559545,0.043246322607204096,0.04171034120387794,0.19186695165648374,0.051678274817158316,0.03795750318112258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839066250933403,0.0,0.06358849905996443,0.0,0.0,0.05622130595107266,0.0,0.2148412514412517,0.038394803735876934,0.0,0.05221539973499921,0.0,0.11705670794083115,0.060343852609233736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274939792943132,0.0,0.09478008330275604,0.0,0.06633751512539389,0.09248344825863494,0.0,0.0,0.041919139870046015
mentalhealth,sgt__smol,2020/04/02,"what are mental hospitals like, i’ve been thinking of admitting myself and i just want to know what to expect so, i’m 14 (i know, there’s a lot of stigma around depressed 14 year old white girls, but just bare with me here) and i’ve been depressed for at least 2 years now. lately it’s been getting worse and i’ve been cutting myself (which i wish i didn’t do) and been starting to be passively suicidal. I’ve seen family members pass due to suicide and i don’t want to get to that point, i’ve been reckless and careless and people around me are actually starting to get worried. Plus now that schools are shut down i have nothing to do besides dwell in my own thoughts. So i’ve been thinking of admitting myself for my own safety and health, but idk how to aboard this with my mother nor how things will go down once i arrive at the ER. So i’d basically just like to know what they’ll do and how my stay will be like",2.5046578947368405,4.174855715789473,3.573881578947372,90.59029605263159,76.05263157894737,6.434210526315789,24.50657894736842,7.1686216300943375,0.878710526315789,726,24,156,8,16,234,103,190,0.184,0.715,0.10099999999999999,-0.9692,0,0,0,0,0,2,15.0,0,0,1,0,15,8,1,1,2,0,21,1,0,3,0,35,40,19,2,4,5,1,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,9,14,0,0,8,0,0,2,3,5,1,0,10,2,17,3,25,25,4,21,0,2,2,0,5,9,0,1,12,102,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.1498623565284467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.273420062774751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645395660411365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477231145885047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407022638886743,0.0,0.08727748024832163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16323793490288202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25319448716223664,0.0,0.1732338678224752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250799189016126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055988717422715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547626354065506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735474290610753,0.0,0.16114608526337856,0.16354724456786715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646623619426047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14517347155618412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542123499881155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21739554739859124,0.16368539358626893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3359617334605371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202521304203672,0.1968031587810796,0.0,0.12191758003921455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18115935851653134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17659814412238153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595798643088485,0.1565011475038156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977883398144903
mentalhealth,ashi-suki,2020/04/02,"I think im losing it This is too much to type out but ill try my best. The last year or so has been incredibly weird for me. Im 16 and i have definitely been thinking too much about stuff i shouldn't think about. Ive realised that im going to die one die and cant stop thinking about that for a minute. Other than fearing death, i also fear that ive gone crazy and wont be able to function as a normal human being again. I get panic attacks, i have trouble falling asleep and i have nightmares every night. Most of the comments are probably gonna be either ""lol edgy teen"" or ""get professional help"" but neither of those help. I have been to a few psychiatrists as a child and i am not able to talk to them. Obviously, there is a lot more to this, and theres dozens of other factors even i am not aware of. Anyways, all i want is your advice, maybe a new way to look at everything. The best outcome would be if you could maybe help me think of a way to start regaining my sanity, or to atleast feel like i am.
Thanks in advance",2.4410177838577307,3.765600144186049,3.886538987688098,89.72381668946647,75.46511627906978,6.7332421340629285,23.809849521203827,7.285733465282438,0.7749370725034197,801,24,179,9,17,265,130,215,0.19899999999999998,0.6409999999999999,0.16,-0.897,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,1,4,12,11,1,3,10,1,26,2,1,0,2,32,41,16,3,6,9,0,1,1,0,4,1,0,0,2,10,7,0,1,6,0,0,4,6,7,0,2,4,2,21,4,26,28,11,16,0,1,1,0,10,3,0,6,8,127,31,2,0.2324107898222361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11355456699644488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292941232656828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220041266689453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439007853121687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09278055211748452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412057069038935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07675256737961232,0.0,0.09790805711020273,0.0,0.10443791597899398,0.0,0.0,0.2615267525957424,0.058756939248505585,0.08301715734343851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142504528051568,0.0,0.066042203882365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336700801129792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37656530234967467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472290658001363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05677208619234984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758326464876801,0.13000411271669535,0.0,0.0987936712091856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23348787650977104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084867204755738,0.0,0.0,0.11223189452680683,0.0,0.10905089115474648,0.11385661427138626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874378301103188,0.0,0.0,0.1363419930771584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252890700411815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225077662397454,0.0,0.0,0.09715291347883558,0.0,0.0,0.1330273752760811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934014946474315,0.0,0.10698631494697054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722986244542575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889583522219193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06854095269654219,0.18447686712907727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825489784491983,0.0,0.0,0.07483246437923058
mentalhealth,die4creamyjalapeno,2020/04/02,"My therapist sucks (a rant) Talking to my therapist each week is useless. I've been seeing her for about 6 weeks now. I have opened up about almost everything to her. However, every conversation is like talking with a stranger. It's so monotone, and no matter how I'm feeling she always asks and says the same thing. 

I mentioned on day one that I feel I have an eating disorder. No mention of it since, even with me bringing up using food as a coping mechanism at least three weeks in a row now. She keeps bringing up the same coping mechanisms that I've told her will not work for me because my anger and emotions are too strong when I'm upset to just ""journal"" or some shit. 

I also understand that therapists see many clients at once so it may be confusing at times but what annoys me is she will give me ""homework"" like finding positive coping skills, and then not follow up about it when she said she will. 

On top of these things, she also rushes our appointments. At least half of our appointments so far have been a half hour or less. She'll say things like ""since you're not feeling well, we can end early today."" Huh?! If I drove here and I've already been here 20 minutes, I don't see a need to end early, especially since I didn't comment on how much pain I was in. 

My problems just seem too much for her to handle and I'm wanting to switch therapists again. This is exhausting and why I took a break from therapy for so long.",4.03045112781955,5.332174070175442,4.732330827067671,85.30631578947369,71.45614035087719,7.954887218045112,27.606516290726816,8.418075326091056,1.8320726817042607,1130,40,227,18,21,363,165,285,0.11800000000000001,0.8079999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.8921,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,3,0,0,4,24,15,4,2,10,1,21,5,1,3,0,41,46,23,0,4,9,0,3,3,0,5,2,3,1,0,13,12,2,1,6,0,0,6,7,10,1,4,9,9,32,5,33,31,9,41,0,1,3,0,26,16,2,8,21,159,45,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351807117615022,0.0,0.11408012433610355,0.1653425980307925,0.08601872516969232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664441626987856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06301823098710757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667021723932713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848007225555955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578143806797087,0.0,0.11628626504032875,0.1831243362925389,0.0,0.0,0.06828015252847125,0.0,0.08710037073009612,0.0,0.09290942409172856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15681297359675414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448556173553016,0.0,0.1250050119882686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916953724512284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180644422506524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09188706049706813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15151571485813964,0.0,0.0,0.09148622129251263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480900249417732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15198935729402965,0.07665343052371111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009412920844022,0.07005156567688038,0.0,0.11000141384865147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891872438824148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833609156993467,0.16442056986813994,0.0,0.0,0.24713649464333065,0.09411139140712756,0.0,0.0,0.1061159669369236,0.2565458937463809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618254004120392,0.0,0.0,0.11822168064470873,0.4801190116906104,0.20603912374398087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06028050651444342,0.0,0.09799019678405567,0.09878204914201548,0.11485669197732425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762007842571336,0.0,0.08928534586330825,0.0,0.0,0.06097498578021211,0.0,0.24877063664018365,0.0,0.0929491807181861,0.0,0.09328250889764628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526036949412307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wander-and-wonder,2020/04/02,"Ideas welcome: I chose something meaningful to me for my final university project, and am designing a set of solidarity cards/gift dressings for young adults with depression/anxiety. I want the cards to be meaningful & far from cliché. Anyone with a spare moment to brainstorm with me? Thoughts below 1. If you suffer from anxiety or depression (I have anxiety) - what meaningful things would be nice to hear from a friend? Something that isn't cliche, and really would show support. (I remember someone once told me that the definition of brave wasn't the same for everyone, and that whatever things I have done that I felt I needed to be brave for are the things I should be proud of. I have pinned that up by my desk and it truly has made a difference to my perspective of what being brave means.)

2. I want the cards to be for everyone. Gender neutral. I am in no way gender bias. But I have noticed many kindness cards and mental health gift dressings/cards are very much in line with trends for a female audience. While I know that men and women can like the same things, I know some of my male friends wouldn't find those styles suited to them. What might be some imagery or visual elements that could reach a broader audience?

Any help greatly appreciated. This project is personal to me, but my feelings are not the same as everyone else's feelings so the input would mean a lot.",4.587521937521939,6.817245795366797,4.810630045630045,81.5412802737803,71.74131274131273,8.57009477009477,28.76114426114427,9.218907990703514,2.614210810810812,1107,44,202,25,22,347,143,259,0.034,0.8059999999999999,0.16,0.9689,0,0,2,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,1,1,1,14,0,0,15,0,29,1,0,1,0,47,44,14,0,10,6,0,3,1,2,6,1,1,0,5,17,10,0,0,14,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,6,4,25,12,33,24,7,11,0,2,0,0,13,5,0,7,5,141,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968897156521847,0.0,0.0813963838446975,0.0,0.2746979599324378,0.0,0.0,0.0836931973270263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556634133305156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309272196187848,0.0,0.0,0.12505530654607894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248905965463353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998941965161164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3431197539842683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1210423000026506,0.0,0.11492551791839645,0.1311195052921073,0.109398630551966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849513915271284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196364017237586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722968657140038,0.13490443269389282,0.0,0.08022871936610733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351205533493575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464343228797245,0.13156196510499993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05847670059537285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017600077693769,0.0,0.11325785690982007,0.0,0.12135146504684377,0.0,0.260764862265868,0.0,0.0,0.12062393222172345,0.12697697951350675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798925063800389,0.08875197620009381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13627301396767974,0.0,0.1274707663899669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451264540733143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667937987715244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13559056767738595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014167855302955,0.18429339148919974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582793243809502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3180789045252619,0.0,0.0,0.09502408557889093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437325132808945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09876052139443356,0.14119786811348162,0.09500794536006574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550826764163264,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chxrlie85,2020/04/02,"I was just diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder and I am not sure what it is. I have been struggling with mental health problems for several years, like depression, severe anxiety, and PTSD. I see a therapist and a psychiatrist and have been on 7 different meds to try to help me. I just kept getting worse. I've been hospitalized 3 times and have attempted suicide twice. I'm 16.  
my parents decided to try to get me into more intensive therapy and were recommended DBT (dialectical behavior therapy, basically for patients with borderline, bipolar, and impulsive and things like self-harm) I had an interview sort of thing with one of the specialists and she diagnosed me with BPD. she didn't explain much about what that is. I only know what the google definition of it is. I'm really confused and scared and am hoping someone here can explain it better for me?",6.796363636363638,8.454451878980894,7.713943254198033,65.17875506658946,65.2420382165605,12.588071800810654,37.839606253618996,12.079253325248375,5.542164331210191,703,37,113,27,11,236,102,157,0.185,0.726,0.08900000000000001,-0.9461,2,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,0,2,4,10,0,3,5,0,16,4,0,0,1,30,26,11,1,2,3,1,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,9,17,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,8,1,14,5,18,18,2,4,0,1,1,0,8,2,0,3,4,81,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116279219735302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285160887765669,0.0,0.0,0.18301457028425236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12515646091430466,0.2949759419980373,0.0,0.15181944261446803,0.1665394070447505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183837555038518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445917996423567,0.0,0.0,0.09739914116596833,0.0,0.0,0.14432696740326628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985932289944653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198358047367474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614081621793264,0.0,0.14643967266690625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682056888968797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846673780903792,0.11051583679542104,0.0,0.0,0.1613510681606963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12688027409742975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139043346206837,0.16986120299637314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930901777341439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454820205192723,0.0,0.11579433990733727,0.0,0.15159143907188852,0.3283209497494725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312184325650492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15191098331129324,0.0,0.1589470421827834,0.0,0.1369542365341533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33235240694208434,0.1687176881218392,0.19307682067314866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08473222222230332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19731374907299695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480846895133961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935757512259927
mentalhealth,yotemedaddy,2020/04/02,"i feel like im losing all hope  

Well I guess the title says it. I know that everyone is going through something or the other during this time period, it's pretty awful.

This is going to be a bit of a read.

Lately, I've felt beyond depressed and down. I am already diagnosed bipolar but I've been struggling with noticing my triggers and identifying patterns so I can yank myself out of an episode. I have tried to reach out to multiple people in my life, blatantly sharing that I am depressed and it is getting worse.

I'm posting here because I have an (almost) five year old daughter and to be honest this is the hardest fucking thing I've ever done in my life. I got pregnant at 17, experienced my abusive ex crying and begging for a child while my grandmother (raised me) verbally abused me to get me to abort. I actually set up an appointment to do so, but on the morning of the appointment my stepdad took me to the hospital instead to just see the fetus and decide there. I was 8 weeks or so, heard the heartbeat and broke down crying. I couldn't do it, so I told my family. They kicked me out, I move in with my ex, graduated high school then left to another state. While I was pregnant, I lived in a home with a lot of other teens and no adults, no water, only electricity. They sold drugs, I sat in a room all day hungry while my ex went out to cheat.

My ex abused me physically, mentally, financially, and any way possible here. Multiple black eyes, even one my mother saw when she visited me when I went into early labor at 28 weeks and did nothing. Basically, I dated my childs father until she was 3. He sexually abused me, I used to have embarrassing mental breaks sometimes and hit myself while he tried to come onto me so he would be so shocked that he would stop. Now I fear that all of this has mentally deteriorated me. I should also note that I had an abortion in 2016 (my daughter was born in 2015). I learned after the first time.

Now I live alone in a basement apartment with my daughter, she is properly loved and cared for. Our needs are met. She is happy. I am not. I am going through another breakup. I hopped in a relationship soon after I left my childs father as I mentally checked out way before our breakup. This most recent ex and I dated a year and a half before he decided he no longer wanted to date someone with a child. I feel like I've just experienced true love and a first true heartbreak. It's less about him and moreso about my looming loneliness. He also was my sanity. I get no adult interaction. I am alone. My family can't stand my daughter and I, they won't move in with us to help me. I do it all 100% alone. Financially and physically. I get no breaks. I'm 22 now, almost 23, and I just want to kill myself. I don't want to do this anymore. I am selfish. I want my youth, I can't support her, I fear I just passed on another generation of poverty and poor mental health. I can't do this.

My stepdad was the only one willing to hrlp but he works 80-90 hour weeks and now I can't even move in since it;s a tiny house and there would be 7 people.

I don't know what to do anymore. I hate this. I can't go to therapy as I can't afford it, and with the pandemic I lost my job so I have no money for it. Just spent the last of my money on this month's rent.

Please give me advice. I know this is all terribly selfish but I'm at my wits end.",2.4081557649258336,4.135332666182876,4.3095446606479575,84.9650284125852,76.47460087082729,7.283668298442843,25.03065115249317,8.118234210410813,1.4818665272687026,2633,92,546,45,59,896,305,689,0.196,0.726,0.078,-0.9983,3,3,2,0,3,1,84.0,3,0,3,5,33,31,4,4,29,1,55,11,1,2,9,86,102,48,1,11,12,12,3,2,0,6,6,2,3,6,27,37,1,1,9,1,7,13,17,18,1,6,23,11,104,13,74,67,9,95,0,6,4,3,50,33,1,8,43,374,131,7,0.0,0.3069078754066785,0.06319391320343401,0.0,0.0,0.06328021402063877,0.0,0.0,0.12969042984856194,0.20120751220049385,0.07146143757427034,0.10357299149441583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04403727504431427,0.20371144431035856,0.0,0.0,0.12844394532318293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0394755300797032,0.0,0.11020761168860876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069834477148143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06602451876615861,0.0,0.0,0.05578279448578096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226599867813053,0.041763187014720135,0.0,0.1115509642483463,0.06572743132788701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626933722537734,0.0,0.0,0.07509806311702319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05735586458401789,0.0,0.0,0.0855433474651429,0.058576805551332725,0.0,0.06187850231844996,0.0,0.0,0.12209508907401323,0.14574023145101112,0.06548660770217213,0.0925254461010327,0.06217729096957157,0.0,0.0,0.11016527880015234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05986720329028813,0.13533234384236342,0.062121230462832036,0.14721256596228516,0.0,0.0517924348475077,0.0,0.0713376132303043,0.0,0.0,0.06893549155256404,0.0,0.06393455828180274,0.0,0.06883412304945596,0.0,0.0,0.04340554228943831,0.06841978335904253,0.06495698526389047,0.0643187425693414,0.06377302708062968,0.0747213831441252,0.0,0.0,0.06994914003526309,0.0,0.06426175998356495,0.0,0.07164450496567892,0.0,0.1067669748158618,0.05278595092725681,0.07304920502161362,0.0,0.1407182807918975,0.0,0.09148018001830732,0.06327442144643153,0.0,0.11436399944143118,0.0,0.0,0.07244700317983062,0.07069038778142124,0.055054453760522114,0.11689222310276062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.326301306597959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05168876517202595,0.20648070870286653,0.0,0.04801681600631174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062136503449118766,0.0737267666418983,0.0679520325257538,0.0,0.08776262502746965,0.09850189170564068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978930059570094,0.0,0.0,0.07108421510522471,0.0,0.07300427568679184,0.06201972017421335,0.06588159004446761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647749572476834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394015265963587,0.0695252482134224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05149770986811388,0.0,0.06553797939658769,0.05160328990130428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053568017734854464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486876280682335,0.04985343565964862,0.06404675704728285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414011360601456,0.0,0.06769852928284742,0.0,0.0,0.07348596752024611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405576826360014,0.0,0.043021960997366944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552115985666058,0.0,0.0,0.06187850231844996,0.07194789076090775,0.08793209238962024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789521848645191,0.055929630221210065,0.0,0.0,0.15278244708383973,0.10280287215705228,0.15583351985309707,0.0,0.058224709292064726,0.12006157827407253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047144182457020026,0.0,0.06599335657528284,0.13800546719395024,0.0,0.0,0.08340332734935782
mentalhealth,climbtheladder0,2020/04/02,"Realized the potential in myself to self harm. Absolutely terrified I am going through a mental health crisis and found myself here. I’m scared of myself. I’m not interested in cutting or something medically dangerous. I just realized I want to punish myself by hitting myself or sleeping on the floor or something like that. I mistakenly believe I will find relief in physical pain. Worst part is... I think I want to do it for the attention it might get me. I just want to be washed over with misery. These feelings are so unlike me and I’m so scared. I need guidance.
This is a call for help.",2.589782164737916,5.355435221238942,4.403539823008848,78.97336963921036,81.7433628318584,7.370728386657588,26.39142273655548,8.384062270229773,2.3846370319945533,472,20,82,11,13,159,74,113,0.298,0.6,0.102,-0.9837,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,5,11,3,2,5,0,8,5,1,0,0,21,21,7,0,4,6,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,7,0,0,1,1,8,0,0,1,1,16,3,15,16,2,7,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,4,1,62,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22514688084318052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040550266936712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104314922870927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826465979585099,0.0,0.0,0.2191099965164877,0.0,0.0,0.10440612740642356,0.0,0.113571475090891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21241645616903185,0.0,0.0,0.13394594225589404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09762983658657218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013138721606498,0.2013878120915815,0.2119945488364492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817595460979435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21263972654699467,0.0,0.0,0.21640304954029105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4001416457366871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084726610659862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999804443090004,0.0,0.0,0.3076872243455449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804691990259345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35360557238883544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yubyuns,2020/04/02,"My whole family may have Covid-19 now I’m sorry if this is the wrong place to post this but i can’t post in the Covid-19 Support group. I’m losing my mind 

I was feeling sick four days ago, had chest pain and couldn’t breathe easily when laying down. 

I went yesterday with my dad and grandma since she was feeling sick too (was coughing, having body pain) 

So i wasn’t coughing so i went inside and got a check up and was told it was sinus infection like allergies. 

My grandma got tested and it took a long time. Fast forward to today, She tested positive. 

She didn’t have a fever and didn’t feel too bad but she still got it. 

I was stuck in a car with her for 4 hours just waiting for the test to be done for some reason. 

My dad doesn’t listen and still goes out and visits her before all this. 

We have to self quarantine now. 


I’m so fuckjng scared. 

I’m overweight, and probably have a chronic illness for several things. My mom is 50 and doesn’t go the doctor. My dad doesn’t take things seriously, he doesn’t wash his clothes nor does he take responsibility for going out all the time to her house. My older sister has had bronchitis when she was younger and gets sick often. My younger sister is healthy but fuck she’s young, she has to live her life. 

My aunt and uncle are old man. They have knee problems and my aunt has cancer. I have been visiting them.... If i gave it to them and it killed them...

holy fuck holy fuck i’m having a mental breakdown. 

WE CANT EVEN GET TESTED IM SO FUCKED 

IS MY FAMILY GOING TO DIE?

AM I GOING TO DIE? 

I haven’t proven myself yet. I haven’t made my family proud yet. I have to live my life. My family should be there. MY FAMILY SHOULD BE HERE WITH ME. 

PLEASE GOD LET US SURVIVE. 

I PROMISE TO PRAY TO YOU EVERYDAY PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE

PROTECT MY FAMILY PLEASE PLEASE

FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

i’m so fucked 

i don’t want to think the unthinkable but fuck

it’s too much it’s too much


We are going to quarantine ourselves so we don’t get anyone else sick

fuck fuck 

Please please i don’t want my family to die

PLEASE PLEASE

I’m losing my mind 

every second every minute. I don’t know i’m 

losing it",0.24008358486185344,2.632304789954336,1.8262588034981808,95.19169607615513,91.28310502283104,4.978623945515054,16.55614890488352,6.6175320697248425,-0.18742834145963927,1670,40,363,22,59,539,191,438,0.275,0.578,0.147,-0.9981,0,2,0,0,0,0,44.0,5,1,4,5,23,27,13,1,12,0,53,35,4,2,2,51,103,29,4,8,7,8,3,1,0,3,19,1,0,2,13,23,1,2,6,0,1,12,17,23,0,2,24,4,59,4,29,71,6,42,1,3,0,12,40,8,12,5,23,218,72,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044276660785451206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03492541227706825,0.05117852147058848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04170522128319834,0.0,0.0,0.042502810683711416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05548193599822316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032212889909101566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551712792193506,0.0,0.0,0.05112478642951915,0.04371059399303519,0.051115037356650635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041725872785477035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03299075850436671,0.0,0.08416815692376274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32961145457814456,0.0,0.0757669505809169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5541231213248522,0.07828867128479992,0.0,0.14193547354599628,0.0,0.1198460262105259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049189576930381285,0.05763429137314445,0.0,0.0,0.053953352420112434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05526102570280487,0.0,0.027450593465316288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051076105182754974,0.07056073011755216,0.024402495568616185,0.0,0.0882115371672399,0.04420317942142581,0.0,0.16764003213071266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04726282986580715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05033671430741736,0.0,0.10086824265511632,0.05849951454163554,0.0,0.0,0.07343633539234426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05241293826738536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062982417300998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05218593957512204,0.5482886147200428,0.0,0.0,0.0956744233844534,0.0,0.05385333147908807,0.04779432422169413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0513557588088653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050007533958380514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05210756635169912,0.056428007341530875,0.0,0.04131822260914756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0559136721981218,0.0,0.0,0.07977846650054779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056681387384519874,0.0,0.0,0.07511067021205257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636762145539192,0.032005219969073975,0.0,0.0,0.05825117722487996,0.0,0.04734568975296535,0.04772828716883479,0.05549503402257814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008234229502332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05892227700702269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926062084747628,0.0,0.05576613118111521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054611249809923934,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Endless_Loading_Bar,2020/04/02,I fear I may harm someone Not sure if this is the right place to post this. I don't normally go to the internet for help with stuff like this but I feel if I tell anyone what is going on they'll think I'm a psychopath. I've been having thoughts about murdering someone. I can't use sharp objects when others are around I fear I might harm them. These thoughts are unwanted but are becoming regular. I constantly ask my friends if I'm a good person. I think I'm not one. What should I do? How do I bring this up with my counselor. All of this started after I started taking a new med. I've stopped taking it. Was that a good idea should? Should I start taking it again? Even after I've stopped the thoughts are still here.,0.9072522700355314,3.2379316241610745,2.0832688511646293,95.7374812475326,85.10738255033556,5.3850769838136605,22.18752467429925,6.794906146795322,0.4971702329253853,568,20,125,7,17,180,87,149,0.187,0.711,0.102,-0.9181,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,0,8,10,1,2,7,0,19,0,0,2,2,30,39,7,1,8,7,0,2,1,1,6,0,0,0,1,13,3,0,2,7,0,0,3,4,5,0,1,5,2,18,5,12,28,1,21,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,5,13,83,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686983526409797,0.0,0.0,0.1233292669257326,0.1295154578389567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530056705001816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14971166663530958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150384013230344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117902498489967,0.07004958608181841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703504825542784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747004881668988,0.2324002290448653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285991068159014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639390251278248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768325902674671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538858283946436,0.0,0.0,0.1469682062658411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13380203014882325,0.0,0.0,0.1357390089476234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387775260229538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12096709251128095,0.1447439855438292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326822652616879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831172646323385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23476764231975705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941762929336417,0.0,0.11063759027698934,0.2316499621279452,0.0,0.0,0.15859424767223915,0.0,0.0,0.1305715637713489,0.0,0.3124927284592797,0.0,0.1210893739466024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754066073150254,0.0,0.32995396794965903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11965339430996284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_captain_raven_,2020/04/03,"AITA for trying to help a friend with psychosis? This got taken down from r/AITA so I've gotta ask it here.

My friend has struggled with anxiety and depression for several years. Recently she was diagnosed with psychosis, which she now uses to explain several things she does that I consider being a bitch. The best example of this is the one I'm asking about. She texted me, telling me that the voices in her head wouldn't shut up and she wanted to kill herself. I tried to call her but she declined it so I was texting her, trying to talk her down. She thanked me, and told me she loved me. I thought she was saying it in a friendly way so I responded ""love you too"". She then asked me if I wanted to come to her house to watch a movie. It was past midnight and my car had no gas, so I told her to raincheck it. She then lashed out at me, telling me that I was leading her on. I asked her what she meant, and she told me that she actually had a crush on me and that I was one of the voices in her head. She said that she and her mental-voice me were in love and dating, and so she decided to ask me for real, and me telling her to raincheck the movie was a rejection. She was really angry, so I told her that she needed to sleep, she wasn't thinking straight and we would talk it out around lunchtime. She wasn't having it. She told me that every time I showed any sort of care towards her, it convinced her more that I loved her back, and her imaginary relationship with mental-voice me grew stronger. So she was mad at me because she had built up this imaginary relationship with me and I accidentally gave her a reality check she didn't want. So she blocked me, and I tried to reach out through friends and through other social media accounts, only to find that she had shut me off completely. So was I wrong to try to talk her down from suicide multiple times and calm her down?",3.8059327128175298,4.780777054973825,4.476992437463643,88.16415842544117,71.64397905759162,7.858212138840412,27.237153383750247,8.167268648758528,1.5126907892185382,1473,50,320,21,27,471,166,382,0.11800000000000001,0.743,0.139,0.9179,1,0,0,0,0,1,40.0,1,1,0,2,15,20,3,1,12,0,24,8,3,2,0,46,56,29,2,7,2,0,0,0,4,3,1,4,0,0,25,27,0,1,6,1,2,4,5,7,0,2,29,5,86,13,52,23,2,38,0,2,1,4,83,23,1,2,10,237,111,1,0.0,0.0,0.08002368589383338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557652610374357,0.0,0.06273253068715763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730005911004263,0.3833114886095809,0.0,0.0,0.06305570776661436,0.0,0.049988634339217936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605772054501064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08373484567496284,0.0,0.08360813697398109,0.0,0.0,0.07063884158969634,0.08597921597987616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062958180344824,0.08323192935147294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176190427760194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690915710427964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494980614259553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534231163739635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558577128419646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168318706339463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0549652855179217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462114610673167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072483520582368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960458079212254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528068570074592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06080463144197688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113552528085678,0.06236743415798026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828171652441505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333805137026614,0.05253360693758461,0.0,0.08096866348451433,0.1760823580211323,0.0,0.0,0.07800420365406607,0.06521255528948265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18528145657613268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206282351163471,0.08359234476338925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08572796916951603,0.0,0.08969863030844084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19773416591260004,0.2150242864754633,0.07549789872191552,0.0,0.0,0.05447954903990593,0.05254459667535618,0.0,0.06510169969296102,0.09563391897020512,0.0,0.0,0.3917897770606329,0.0,0.2783753127742739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082478254784118,0.0,0.0,0.1451035463989595,0.06509064191037324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058253005701189776,0.08965806508976792,0.0,0.05280763076674677
mentalhealth,avienary,2020/04/03,"my problems aren't that big..? i've had multiple friends self-harm and a few even attempting suicide. some have still been struggling with mental health and cutting, and i always try to be there and support them.

compare that to myself, who's never cut because i'm a bit of a venephobe, and never attempted to commit suicide because i'm afraid of the beyond. i have some weeks where i'm just exceptionally anxious and depressed (i feel like that's too strong of a word?) but i try to play it down since i know it must be nothing compared to what my friends have experienced.

a lot of conflicting thoughts go through my head (even while writing this post). sometimes ""i'm invalidating myself"" and sometimes ""i'm just one of those people who think mental illness is cool to have"".

i don't really know what this post was for. maybe it was to vent to something? or maybe it was for someone to tell me if i'm either valid or simply blowing things out of proportion. feel free to add your comment and input. sorry if i sound like i'm looking for attention.",4.687110016420358,6.169573014778327,5.091940886699508,82.66024302134646,70.08374384236453,7.383776683087027,31.267323481116584,7.793537801064563,2.1281674220032847,834,36,156,10,15,265,120,203,0.11599999999999999,0.752,0.132,0.7371,0,0,1,0,0,3,27.0,0,1,1,3,9,15,2,2,6,1,15,3,1,0,4,38,31,14,2,4,9,0,2,2,2,1,2,1,0,0,15,11,0,1,7,1,1,1,4,6,0,1,6,6,15,10,25,22,6,13,0,1,1,0,9,5,0,7,7,106,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192094167327132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519550891741826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16398893940236786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14684725642910665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585103657546188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776817536764346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602197767142546,0.09609212177267733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20784018519188102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644366177640245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804340976230686,0.1429750887547453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14784351156190256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142705422002482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11295234924526056,0.0,0.0,0.1143533913710096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2702615480942396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711036689643787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074808159971323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12906348918201999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114570322655603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325050318919048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576418381935849,0.0,0.0,0.12870542734515594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616889217472222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403205653479534,0.0,0.0,0.11126592089440618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11396769341467827,0.10355037694089693,0.26606253897386584,0.15057003508022707,0.0,0.0,0.10741779270972032,0.0,0.0,0.14061635136727926,0.0,0.29425855386063404,0.15263741677781947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11756540645346288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936074754061017,0.08618691822669676,0.0,0.10678386024205157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826434064506584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789373227942464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thebuzzingmon,2020/04/03,Social Media’s Energy I haven’t been on reddit but for a few hours and I’ve noticed quite a few patterns of people being really rude to others and basically adults cyber bullying each other. How can we expect to set an example for our younger generations while behaving this way? What could possibly be causing this behavior and making people think it’s ok to judge someone that they’ve only briefly encountered on some post on the internet? What can we do to stop this behavior?,5.460904761904764,7.442649122222222,6.730952380952385,69.70500000000001,68.8888888888889,10.476190476190476,30.63492063492064,10.608840637214634,3.907825396825397,391,16,62,12,7,132,70,90,0.139,0.815,0.046,-0.8952,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,3,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,4,1,8,0,0,3,0,15,10,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,10,6,4,9,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,3,45,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732678638143873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21238914115463234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619684885068576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775652467940632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30285671707658884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20231430799550867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688388091003474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998888500623758,0.2547662090920541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829367788219428,0.0,0.0,0.17041426310986907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711659957292488,0.225391321640912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22239815762587675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704499128238957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111481473123197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CodedOwl,2020/04/03,"I have to make a big life decision and I feel like I'm not in the right place mentally to do so In a little over a month I will be graduating from college and I will have earned a degree in computer science. I like programming, however I can't stand the office environment. It feels so soulless and pointless.

I'm considering teaching instead, and have even been accepted into the college I need to go to in order to get my Masters in Education, I just need to accept their offer. But I struggle so much with self-doubt, I don't know if this is the right decision. What if I'm not a good teacher? What if I'm not an effective communicator? What if I'll be too mean? What if I'll be too nice?

To put things simply, I have been really unhappy for the past couple years, and I'm scared that it's just an inevitable reaction to the stresses of everyday life. I'm so scared I'm never gonna be happy again. I'm so scared I'm gonna end up in a job I despise, and I'm gonna continue to barely drag myself out of bed in the morning, and every night I'm gonna go to bed dreading the next day. I want so so much to have a purpose in life but I don't see one.

I'm 21 years old and I don't feel any different than when I was 15. In fact, somehow I feel even worse off. I'm still scared. I'm still horribly indecisive. I don't feel anything anymore apart from fear, anger, and hopelessness. Does everyone feel this way? Is anyone really happy with their life or are most folks just getting by? I genuinely want to know how others feel about this because I don't know if I'm cracking up or if it's just the reality of life.

I guess I'm viewing teaching as a way to make a positive difference in someone's life. But my doubts and insecurities are holding me back. I don't know what to do. I don't know where to find my purpose. I need to have made my decision in a few days time and I just feel so lost.

If anyone out there can relate to how I'm feeling I'd love to hear your thoughts on things.",1.7484042553191483,3.2822843546099314,4.056329787234045,86.90875,77.79432624113475,7.536879432624112,25.22517730496454,8.344100000000001,1.5349191489361704,1554,57,346,30,36,540,189,423,0.165,0.777,0.057999999999999996,-0.9923,3,0,0,0,0,1,39.0,0,1,2,4,29,24,2,11,21,0,30,7,0,6,2,78,84,36,0,13,21,0,9,2,0,6,6,1,2,0,15,16,0,1,23,0,0,3,12,15,0,1,6,12,34,9,49,68,4,52,0,2,2,1,6,26,0,15,21,210,49,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05783689401063941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434671360216738,0.11893782879717167,0.0,0.06998887606938965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539817476000519,0.0,0.05184567044477886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410617074907038,0.0,0.1097003853433817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17771822699086076,0.0,0.0,0.07442779921569914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753290265461766,0.0,0.0,0.11234940208444068,0.0,0.07165826532665563,0.0812688881527734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570485811208804,0.3870343687793963,0.060759713379716536,0.0,0.0,0.0777341289782045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887019484227564,0.0,0.09667171238487256,0.07133587710561043,0.0,0.0,0.09369212720862496,0.0,0.0,0.1810745426225797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585749399099874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08439896876831088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23370618792253064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3604398412800641,0.08310223561969207,0.08524241030749526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284208574601473,0.0,0.07676091574080339,0.08047633514608715,0.11354302671999633,0.0,0.0,0.0926443472559284,0.0,0.0,0.08571036271544208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788607219195496,0.0,0.12504302335925796,0.18919041847781096,0.06559577767258737,0.0,0.0904516047174733,0.07981363253566952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924563336502292,0.0,0.05763205871277693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811898170539203,0.0,0.0,0.08885911349543038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549870773881399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897037330842876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14526441413281935,0.0,0.0,0.3405994159969232,0.0,0.06777381219929453,0.0,0.08872566423281597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720625609954239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584202693253872,0.0,0.09742444978233056,0.08891269177913744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130068377678077,0.0,0.0,0.06752017358130179,0.049593319679690114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032934814633876,0.13501741002261267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667318233950917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953878048052114
mentalhealth,unkown1221,2020/04/03,"Possible eating disorder and depression is getting worse with the quarantine (f,21) Hey (f, 21), so before every college basically shutdown I went to get help with my emotions. I had been feeling more and more sad everyday to the point where I didn't know if I wanted to be alive anymore. I say sad because I don't like saying I'm depressed because I know that it's really hard for people and I don't want to take away meaning from that title. Well anyways I went to get help with the school services twice, and each time I felt even worse. It was the most none constructive appointment I've ever been in. They cut me off the first session when I was about to get into my real problems and I just didn't feel I could talk to this person after that so the second appointment was just as bad. The fact that I couldn't even have THERAPY workout really didn't help my motivation and hopes for things. 

I started getting slightly better after these appointments because I was talking to someone close to me more but I know I still needed help. I have an eating problem where if I'm overly stressed, bored or you know just sad/numb I eat a lot and I don't feel like I can stop. It was in check while I was at school because I could rock climb and control everything that was in my house to eat (usually not much I made sure of that I just ate at the dining halls). I managed to lose 15lbs and was feeling good about my body for the first time. Well now being home for a couple weeks I've probably already put all that weight back on, I never feel like moving and I just numb myself with food, T.V., and video games. 

So I guess just to sum it up being home has made it really hard to stay happy even though my home life isn't bad. I feel like I'm losing control and I think I know how to get back on track but it feels harder than ever. I've even started to feel like I don't want to be alive again and I hate it . I've had more than my fair share of crap happen over the past few years and I don't think I've managed to deal with it all properly. If anyone has any advice please let me know. I'm going to try online therapy but I'm not sure how comfortable I feel about that. I am willing to give it a shot.",2.8033991228070185,4.2093707872807045,3.9706140350877206,89.15596491228071,74.6798245614035,6.908771929824562,23.63157894736842,7.492282038375204,0.9028447368421052,1733,50,370,21,36,565,214,456,0.179,0.7290000000000001,0.092,-0.9881,0,1,0,0,0,2,36.0,0,1,1,9,32,31,3,1,14,0,37,12,2,7,8,86,85,30,0,13,15,0,13,5,0,1,2,2,3,1,20,22,8,3,20,4,1,6,14,16,2,4,21,15,51,15,52,55,12,49,0,6,0,0,16,18,1,8,29,244,71,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439733388293657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07272298500324292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04481468889151507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06535571789881224,0.04607925344328671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191581211655917,0.10134703483224493,0.1100485483848478,0.16068965189779186,0.0,0.05607658314838868,0.0,0.0,0.0582837527388794,0.0,0.07320074477875121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478263225643464,0.10523258289981248,0.07291779472313263,0.0,0.0,0.0679406568476042,0.11352023378620935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552783245957047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697311903894534,0.0,0.07412933986375947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741069809397353,0.11922178719732936,0.05552412386683436,0.0,0.05922723782256959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998920520175562,0.18831769574270185,0.06327494033440027,0.0,0.0,0.11211008608293248,0.07968730455946799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20658215841529828,0.06321789016119803,0.03745284726338464,0.055274322627062174,0.0,0.0,0.0725969747211251,0.0,0.05827571033048023,0.07015244708949561,0.11806804229993825,0.06506322963744232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17668721526581627,0.0,0.1983111182289987,0.06545419613811088,0.0,0.07604048015636733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21730357999881894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738786007566926,0.046547564570409865,0.16097859762320546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474518986635572,0.0,0.056026359825564434,0.0,0.12471354087713478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178510656309046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700419414636573,0.04844454638996306,0.04886448284364979,0.050826629252484185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290960907688338,0.04568719985437196,0.05754188906100779,0.0,0.07233910322181668,0.06229739723717146,0.07429305967187412,0.0,0.0,0.07105202625251691,0.12611600753575591,0.0,0.06624833600567619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07500934553306765,0.12665289505288313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481365361697148,0.0,0.13338991362572108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05583739076897305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328961158472386,0.0702413042607451,0.052628329023466085,0.05509587832951268,0.07548895012617755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12422112958286728,0.0,0.04954907305802643,0.10593686181136633,0.0,0.0,0.15072622963231552,0.0,0.043781450956258114,0.08445292675507955,0.0647470353365626,0.0,0.07685437576000954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044742202600585014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258023464727856,0.0,0.11660969872551168,0.0,0.052861511102876096,0.08024921479346071,0.11850516318718868,0.12218109028686445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343167460226386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042437845710451616
mentalhealth,shyak78,2020/04/03,Question about getting help What is the difference in getting medicated by a psychiatrist vs. a physicians assistant?,13.475,14.894638722222233,12.407777777777778,38.16500000000002,50.66666666666667,16.088888888888892,62.444444444444436,14.554592549557764,10.382377777777778,99,8,10,4,1,32,16,18,0.0,0.847,0.153,0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4718681262044722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4719269714277252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30272506237966196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4549802217322664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5059406482493995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,savemetotheend,2020/04/03,"I’m scared,am I developing schizophrenia? So I have had dpdr (be diagnosed with dpdr disorder)  for a while it’s about a year and since having it I have had a fear of schizophrenia. In the beginning the fear was crippling, it’s calmed down for a few months till recently. Most of time I’ve only had to deal with dr but dp has hit me hard and made me question if I’m developing schizophrenia and being back the fear of it. I’m looking up what onset schizophrenia is like and watching people’s videos on how it started for them and it gets me scared cause I experience some of the onset symptoms but a person said that it’s nothing to worry about yet cause those symptoms all go along with the beginning of other mental disorders like depression and anxiety. I’m scared that any second now I’m going to start hallucinating or any second I’m going to hear a voice, I get pictures in my head hallucinating. Something I also get like a thought  of where I’m hallucinating in my current environment and check and nothing is happening. Adding to that is I keep on getting these what if question like what if there are cameras or what if people are using me, cause I saw that these are types of delusions I don’t believe in them but they just pop up and they scare me. I’m able to get reassurance for a short time before before I’m back at questioning my sanity. I can’t get back to my old psychologist because we can’t afford it rn. Any thoughts would be very much appreciated.",4.927783505154643,5.988195068728522,5.9394828178694175,78.3945850515464,69.10309278350515,8.70659793814433,29.67027491408935,8.982922981607832,2.3756637800687286,1179,44,226,21,20,391,146,291,0.105,0.807,0.08900000000000001,-0.5822,2,0,1,0,1,0,17.0,1,0,4,0,13,13,0,6,13,0,21,5,1,6,1,40,54,23,0,5,10,0,1,4,0,1,4,3,0,1,20,14,0,1,5,1,1,3,3,7,0,2,9,7,24,6,35,40,5,33,0,1,3,0,13,12,0,11,22,150,44,1,0.09271497634491484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414413308603006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18914808973965688,0.0,0.07092670313180999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138762815658757,0.0,0.0565181890305621,0.0,0.15778723217769156,0.10445802892917956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28573146066560856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955850695106575,0.07985527326928947,0.09410374935516856,0.0,0.0,0.21251879068024973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069303747445202,0.0,0.3129903740573677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906384908241325,0.0,0.1580761730228503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08198754738589667,0.0,0.08305440772776992,0.0,0.0951523140012057,0.0,0.10449651665995242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240933097119857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18118341691110526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785722926625044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772915237190201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934348893605104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07400420956604066,0.0,0.06815617553541771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17792504067937126,0.0,0.09728877133624884,0.0,0.0,0.07051391740715053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855378138668788,0.0809551411610311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3115859769763309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154485392251556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819317401996346,0.0,0.2784715967389676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669478652264296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137651843423125,0.0,0.0,0.13124827491659016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927327207055424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14721066970901456,0.10812569660161818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080075971288276,0.0,0.07649956538237762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415655897031154,0.0,0.06586205907280168,0.0,0.0,0.059705404986220977
mentalhealth,roseyelephant33,2020/04/03,"Does your mental health improve if you stay off social media? Does anyone have no social media and find that it’s helpful at all? I just deleted my IG and snapchat apps bc I found myself just comparing myself on them. I kept twitter bc I use that for news, facebook for family communication, and tiktok for the pet videos.😂",3.336344086021509,5.803677903225813,4.427096774193551,81.727311827957,76.41935483870971,6.068817204301076,23.23655913978495,7.1686216300943375,1.0891849462365593,258,8,45,3,6,84,48,62,0.036000000000000004,0.865,0.099,0.594,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,12,4,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,10,0,6,2,1,4,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,0,29,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987038756099946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4502304178789047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24250594221103755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23511557336178399,0.0,0.0,0.2820538298335835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734374329545691,0.0,0.0,0.17242465704251908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592405850271753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5244539800492023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741869643291931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221754826860809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Soramame,2020/04/03,"What can I do for ailing friend Hi Reddit, i am struggling with what sort of mental support I can provide for a friend who is not doing well under the circumstances of self isolation. 

I am often good at supporting friends while they have depressive/anxiety episodes, but I feel that I am also dealing with these things myself. To be honest, I find it very difficult to provide help in the form of company because of my current struggles with depression/anxiety (though I would not say that I am suicidal). She is on Lexapro, has reported having difficulty sleeping, and has expressed having suicidal thoughts today. I don’t think she is taking care herself very well at all, and I am at a loss as to what to do given the limitations of COVID-19 and my own abilities. I have suggested that she get a therapist (even Betterhelp.com), go outside, take less naps, and drink less. I don’t think she’s really doing those things. Do you all have any suggestions?",8.739936868686867,8.143292261363637,8.52984848484849,68.73838383838385,61.04545454545455,12.367676767676773,40.01010101010101,11.645159339076185,4.8497457070707055,762,36,129,20,9,246,109,176,0.141,0.7190000000000001,0.141,-0.2415,1,1,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,1,2,6,14,0,2,6,0,26,2,1,0,2,21,38,9,2,1,3,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,1,12,7,1,1,5,2,0,1,4,4,2,0,2,2,23,10,21,34,6,10,0,1,0,0,19,6,0,2,3,108,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113146723411568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09621568919358316,0.0,0.2164736096499417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624887278058442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14425494244064976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14586639525003242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386029306136186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934505157733136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153983854216492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12931612116177926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32793641613823643,0.0,0.07392086998953144,0.0,0.08041005306166106,0.11867218489779993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483543570752197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258513982755078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906398912744502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251576401731744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760130327448862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158870548535304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958248731687647,0.0,0.3095265896470346,0.3211144651390338,0.0,0.0,0.21276051808467852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16427676130465754,0.18799472145611604,0.181317705269034,0.13900979304417627,0.1123244971349992,0.0,0.0,0.13411268269179896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334824025896099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544267567416316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050796834565373,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pinecone457,2020/04/03,"Feeling exposed I had a very hard upbringing. There are things that happened in my past that I never want to discuss. My partner of 15 years came from a very privileged life. I have done well to contain my past, move on, and do very well financially. Covid 19 has my partner very concerned, which I understand. It’s a bad situation. However, this is far from the worse I have ever experienced and therefore I’m minimally concerned. I own property, have a stable secure job, life insurance, building insurance, employment insurance, no dependants and good health. My partner feels I’m not sympathetic to what’s going on. I am sympathetic but feel worse things happen and continue to happen on a daily basis. I feel that he is being selfish just because this is just something that is affecting him personally. I don’t hear him worrying about the starving children, war, poverty, homelessness, animal abuse, child abuse, domestic abuse, suicide, mental health, pollution, cancer and everything else going on on a daily basis all year round.

I guess what I’m asking, is there something wrong with me? The fact that I don’t care? I always knew my upbringing would effect me. Until now I never knew I was so emotionally switched off. I don’t know what I’m trying to say. This recent situation has made aware of how disengaged I am with other people’s emotions.  I have this ability to switch off and just not care about things. I don’t think this is normal. I think my partner has started to notice my lack of emotions. I’m not depressed, I’m content with my current life. I have achieved more than I ever thought I would. Emotionally I just feel numb most of the time. 

I don’t know what I’m trying to say. I just think there is something wrong with me emotionally and I don’t know what to do.",3.7972705223880614,6.3315994686567185,4.907140858208955,78.52683069029852,75.2089552238806,8.00839552238806,28.976212686567163,8.841846274778883,2.7131361940298504,1422,62,247,32,32,466,159,335,0.228,0.6970000000000001,0.075,-0.996,4,0,3,0,3,1,47.0,0,0,0,2,17,14,1,0,10,0,32,7,0,6,6,56,68,11,2,5,9,0,7,0,4,2,7,3,0,7,21,12,0,2,16,0,0,4,12,7,2,0,8,11,40,7,31,57,5,28,0,1,1,0,15,9,0,3,15,168,61,3,0.0,0.2826042259838741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615522034210035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07432721934154132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638404779454568,0.0484660165364828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093348989131828,0.16212298666404742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847825560549893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136206878899603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06641691970535486,0.4471667925400355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383515158748567,0.0,0.0,0.07145471419764282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20100268479000874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903699917632597,0.06668571878393358,0.0,0.0,0.08758463624205594,0.0,0.21092023093177034,0.0,0.07122160790016115,0.0,0.0,0.16902196065529349,0.08960884966974916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889726916240475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13108297612541409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16847195877709062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523033951581544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08012317752046524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450211580230882,0.0,0.0,0.12263959625285267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789883354154163,0.0,0.09051791537778174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15179462362707608,0.055119332390015936,0.06942142481073073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850241630423338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126452455636171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787357700663274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836224186630994,0.0,0.0,0.056274636286139296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696647462557514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15846042362853927,0.15283237830160373,0.0,0.06311874880320142,0.046360489334495485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795848048748763,0.0,0.0,0.08276837383304657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624025478842691,0.04689459895724698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297058039162522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08074203052765529,0.16204646800779385,0.11295732219668635,0.17385428998850005,0.0,0.10239829672585
mentalhealth,justwaffles078,2020/04/03,"I think I suspect something So, this kind of behavior of mine has been going on for as long as I can remember. I've only started to take notice of it though in the past 2 years.
Since early childhood I've always had an issue with skin picking. It's a bad habit, yes, but I never had any idea what caused it. It still goes on, sometimes more severe sometimes less. It's this overwhelming urge to remove any little area of dry skin or imperfection. It used to mainly happen on my fingers and toes (I also had a big issue with nail biting), though now it has moved onto my face, causing scarring. But my mind won't let me stop. I know it's bad, it's just not healthy, I just don't know the cause or how to not do it.
Another strange symptom I encounter is, no matter where in my house, if there's a mirror or reflective surface, I pull up my shirt and stare at my waist. I've always been on the heavier side, but always in the healthy range. And I pinch and prof, and it's just a reflex at this point. Same thing with my face, I'll stare at it for several minutes. This also happens really frequently throughout the day, too many to count.
I don't know if this is an issue. But it does seem to take a toll on my mental health. Does anybody else do this? Should I see someone about this? Could this be some kind of OCD or BDD? It's just that it's been going on for so long, and I never knew why, and I want to stop. Thank you for reading this post! I appreciate it a lot",2.175490196078435,3.6104010196078455,3.605822222222223,91.01140000000002,76.38562091503267,6.203189542483663,22.69751633986928,6.742157984588678,0.4886521830065358,1136,32,250,10,25,374,163,306,0.08199999999999999,0.865,0.054000000000000006,-0.8788,0,0,1,0,0,0,40.0,0,1,0,0,17,6,0,1,13,1,20,10,8,6,2,54,37,26,0,5,16,0,3,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,28,10,1,2,10,1,0,5,8,3,0,0,7,7,26,3,36,25,6,42,0,1,3,0,1,21,0,9,15,167,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589417292176559,0.248066107943151,0.0,0.0,0.13515802806476254,0.1042042870859832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16594943710411186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30625924506652097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934356315253373,0.0,0.0,0.06408922891947035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17392902484257672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301580579572783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11295521862895773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17575554549553718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563192574438003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466643644354507,0.0,0.11218328554105916,0.0,0.31116783648894203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069693974539333,0.16384317335746668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161858208342993,0.0,0.0,0.09960075036644483,0.0,0.1758890737777455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448582932262459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007515564192342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014752527343254,0.0,0.10034132163351643,0.0,0.0,0.10562084580093807,0.0,0.0,0.15328962786228764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131401112453308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557984361081678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486553314851304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394233868861546,0.0,0.09517463411893518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940278412738143,0.0,0.06366274082395802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125735130102531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918971936497085,0.09046807941497784,0.0,0.22453294256962172,0.0,0.08220476445347119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08420087046554119,0.07650441642030698,0.1965705956543134,0.0,0.07033876755923539,0.0,0.07936171540066128,0.16616539027057536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328960172148204,0.14943660600146813,0.0,0.0,0.09149196941297494,0.0,0.0,0.06602092665851718,0.06367605871450961,0.1952726178756577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582886342857518,0.0,0.0,0.058614475606123026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967128523764982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399481602367285
mentalhealth,bigchuckdeezy,2020/04/03,"Need help with understanding new bizarre behavior Hi there, I suffer from anxiety, depression, BPD, and Tourette’s (it’s a great time lol). I am fairly comfortable and familiar with the symptoms but recently I am experiencing new symptoms. Over the past few days at least about a half dozen times a day I find myself getting this sudden massive burst of energy where I grit my teeth and flex want to yell and not hit something per say but want to release this feeling of pent up energy. This usually lasts about 30 seconds and then I am back to my normal mild mannered self, it’s almost like I’m hulking up or something. Obviously this has been pretty concerning but I can generally get it under control quickly, if anyone has experienced anything like this or has any advice please let me know. If it helps I can post the medications I’m taking as well.",5.430791666666668,7.190011162500002,6.130000000000003,74.8616666666667,68.625,9.333333333333334,32.083333333333336,9.725611199111238,3.289145833333333,686,30,119,16,12,224,111,160,0.045,0.745,0.21,0.9776,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,0,6,1,10,4,1,1,1,27,22,14,0,6,8,0,1,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,9,7,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,3,1,5,12,5,16,19,2,21,0,2,0,0,5,6,0,5,16,77,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14680276481278384,0.0,0.0,0.15043338558651026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216137589575564,0.0,0.11492534113882165,0.0,0.0,0.1050441283528959,0.0,0.12362627694583772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155173981736324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189209100523056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849542951577606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19377151029086806,0.0,0.1293926563194637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075960671259373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13730726219514194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697767898014398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656288204884494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20139165819538848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256233714461111,0.12245729031298573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536200891780482,0.0,0.14678932671175707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513406597070084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139344985360312,0.0,0.29018564118566564,0.0,0.0,0.14719324998866362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434112872213949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490714314888633,0.0,0.0,0.14387856513127836,0.15283765578978353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833374599404162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946872031279815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15672238439398006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313083893131489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122924469580157,0.11295406937268072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520034090292544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639445915792705,0.0,0.0,0.16545683609122772,0.0,0.17721878784619285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13507457957882246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RealDyslexicon,2020/04/03,"Mental Health in the time of Coronavirus We're creating a series of videos addressing mental health using films:

Cinema Therapy!

Many more coming.

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2qqfafRdEQ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=N2qqfafRdEQ)",22.11226666666667,29.80427676000001,11.732000000000005,25.792666666666694,41.40000000000001,12.933333333333335,28.333333333333336,11.20814326018867,5.925133333333334,209,5,14,6,3,51,22,25,0.0,0.885,0.115,0.4314,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412861090966394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5954781533189806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28398303987055085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5645609789752637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203250813302511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333178522388106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24192124083581865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alexisawee,2020/04/03,"Inability to socialize unless forced As the title says, I generally am unable to go out and socialize with others. I prefer to spend my time alone, in my room. I'm not afraid of anything, I just don't want to socialize. This has been consistent for over a year now. It's made me disconnect with friends outside of school. I don't reach out to people not because I dislike them, but because I generally don't want to interact with others. This includes instant family as well. I have been diagnosed with depression and anxiety, and my mother thinks I don't want to interact because I'm afraid of judgment. I'm not. I just don't want to interact. It frustrates me because I feel weird and 'not normal'. I also generally don't have any motivation to do things other than mess around on my phone, read, play video games, or just scroll through the internet on the computer. I feel that there's more to it than just depression and anxiety. I've thought about antisocial personality disorder, and it generally fits (not wanting to interact, irritability and irritation, repeatedly failing to complete any work, poor relationships, irresponsibility), but I also have doubts about it as well, because I don't have problems understanding others(I can actually read others pretty well), I don't do any risk-taking behaviors, and I've never had problems with the law. Is there something else to it other than depression and anxiety, or am I just reading too much into it?  
Edit: To add, I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety five years ago. I don't think I really have any anxiety anymore. I don't get worried about anything. I'm also on depression/anxiety medication, but I've been constantly switching them because of a variety of different things (unable to concentrate, sleeping a lot, eating barely anything, no improvement of depression).",8.349301435406701,8.830291327272732,9.133987240829347,60.51150717703351,61.48484848484848,13.129186602870815,41.004784688995215,12.488612386084178,5.805999999999999,1478,78,230,51,19,502,155,330,0.221,0.6990000000000001,0.079,-0.993,1,1,1,0,0,0,51.0,0,0,2,3,19,19,1,3,7,0,27,5,1,2,1,62,45,22,0,9,16,1,2,0,1,0,3,1,1,1,17,21,1,0,8,6,2,1,17,14,3,1,7,3,28,5,48,38,3,20,0,6,0,0,16,11,0,4,8,168,45,9,0.0,0.0,0.07995481898559928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262868816314665,0.0,0.0,0.08485791010042525,0.0,0.19656544515785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22286908192897675,0.0,0.3760712653692016,0.0,0.08125555039653119,0.0,0.0,0.20227170936889,0.07293776813804714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996736902545609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590522385228556,0.08854049894890313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35284399643971226,0.16632060297617518,0.0,0.08560257852931327,0.0939023515319832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838379450140081,0.06844453373654873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07723916949498914,0.0,0.08285560427240002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330125627844932,0.0,0.04280662688184759,0.0,0.04656442949667061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965653275186619,0.0,0.07752701471018532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253890864254684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06023020490297875,0.0,0.06319180429025771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027697406060172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056802047159683636,0.0715407621066511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335534768248255,0.0,0.15679769017298426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458656088379579,0.0,0.05248839748431127,0.0,0.0,0.08796541239561934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515643456709065,0.0,0.0829206012684676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199220175917375,0.2505612201994422,0.0,0.06307604992185893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088653298894952,0.1049987555290344,0.0,0.06504567437085093,0.047775809091639504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529517448666757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24163112160502925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210029030936732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059648222170395164,0.08320696980414144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552437098723952
mentalhealth,indibsibdon,2020/04/03,"My thoughts are getting dark again 3 months ago, I decided to seek help for my ongoing battle with anxiety and depression. I’ve had suicidal thoughts ever since I was a child. Something happened that sent me spiralling out of control and I decided it was time to try and get better. It was that or I would end up killing myself. 

I was doing a lot better until this covid situation. I work as a pharmacy tech so I still have to go to work and interact with patients. My boss tries to keep us safe but I don’t feel safe. I’m going crazy at home because I live on my own but at least I have amazing coworkers. I was told we would have to reorganize things at work and my new position would be the only one with direct patient contact which means I won’t be in contact with any of my coworkers. They’re the only people I can talk to. They’re the ones keeping me somewhat sane. 

I don’t want to be completely isolated. I’m terrified to be all alone at home AND at work. I’m terrified of being the only one interacting face to face with patients. I’m already going crazy thinking about it. I keep thinking maybe this is a sign I shouldn’t have gotten help. I should’ve just let it get really bad and I never would’ve had to deal with this cause I’d be dead anyway. I don’t want to kill myself but I don’t know how to live right now. I’m so scared of everything and everyone but mostly myself.",2.135979020979022,4.062578052447556,3.924475524475525,86.51825174825176,77.91608391608392,7.337062937062937,24.98601398601399,8.263242389622931,1.6035706293706289,1097,40,227,21,26,369,149,286,0.192,0.733,0.075,-0.9913,0,1,1,0,0,3,20.0,2,0,0,7,10,11,3,1,8,0,31,2,2,4,3,53,58,18,4,6,6,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,11,16,0,6,9,0,0,4,7,6,0,3,12,1,33,5,36,34,6,25,0,1,0,0,13,10,0,4,11,151,44,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108229060477667,0.0,0.0,0.10641873099124532,0.11338794588175342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06987399538828241,0.0,0.07860399966543942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579253758677677,0.06263586936211478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18174927778464692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555326671454096,0.0,0.0,0.10773214774038224,0.0,0.11524364038465475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593145374139136,0.08849902217614357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100661685814404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929438853070586,0.0,0.09818269139682917,0.09234569836004104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05195383819697338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16104899020223878,0.0,0.17518676186471974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908620993607258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377432485868444,0.0,0.20613464771371334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739886137968814,0.22735683824805455,0.0,0.05646909425706013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506954618277048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146149055577945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873549656352728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322688275029636,0.11192562815908393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201462364830102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924766958858508,0.0992372605408272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20887958838036896,0.2344395987212317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123439369747231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658247256553221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774853125179043,0.0,0.0,0.10287136969285872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499643586934243,0.11549608513611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910250418235351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205683695318314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239258211845812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258711570636401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826299541240594,0.1316769916421009,0.0,0.16314514733685473,0.059914755967891774,0.0,0.0,0.09818269139682917,0.0,0.13952195298032255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359643351716257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12121004299430482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29921491593394817,0.0,0.0,0.2919645798115102,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,missinky,2020/04/03,"I don't know what to call this? I'm not sure how to start any of this so I'll just bring this up and work from there: I'm terrified of growing up. I'm 15 (turning 16 in a few months) and the thought of growing older and having to support myself always makes me feel sick to my stomach. I'm very dependent on my dad and my mom isn't in my life anymore (not like I want her to be anyway); I can't function without someone telling me what I should be doing, and I'm kind of dog shit at making and sort of schedule for myself.

This quarantine thing also really affects that because, now that I'm doing online classes and can work at my own pace, I end up putting everything off until last minute (Hell I'm doing that right now). I try to work on it, but I also don't like change all that much. I'm really lazy and I give up on things easily; I could probably come back to it if I wanted to, but I really only am able to work in short bursts.

Moving on from that, one of the reasons I'm afraid to grow up is because the realization that I'm going to be alone in the world terrifies me. I'm not interested in dating people and I sure as hell don't want kids, but the thought of being by myself in some apartment somewhere just scares me.

All of this just leads to me using other sorts of media to distract myself from all of these fears. Let it be a book, TV show, Manga, or anime series, I engross myself into their world and let all my worries slip away. Hell, I do that with my own story that I've created.The problem with this, however, is that it makes me slip into a delusion somewhat? I think I might be a Maladaptive Daydreamer (I don't know for sure, honestly). I daydream pretty much all day every day, and I often project myself into the main character of whatever I'm into (in this case it's the main character of my own story because I daydream about that the most). Sometimes, if I'm trying to do something else, I get distract and I just want to daydream for hours on end (I have before).

All of that daydreaming, however, leads me to some weird depersonalization-like moments. I look at myself in the mirror and I can't recognize myself. My face doesn't feel like my own and my body feels like it doesn't belong. Then I crash and realize that I'm a real person- a real\* person with real needs, memories, and people actually think about me and can see me. Then it dawns on me that, the people I'm surrounded by are real people as well. I realize the same things as before- real people with memories, personalities, and needs. I remember that this is reality- that I'm not any sort of character in a cool fantasy story, but I'm just an average 15-year-old girl living a mundane life and am indistinguishable from a crowd. It's soul crushing in the moment, honestly.

Every time I do that, I feel weightless- my head spaces out and I just feel weird- knowing that who I'm looking at is...me. I don't even feel like I'm looking at myself, but someone else; then the dream breaks and reality sets in, I think about my fears and what reality really is, and then I force myself to forget and move on.

Maybe indulging in the fantasy world via movies and shows isn't too good for a person like me, but without the distraction all I do is worry about the future, then I lament over the fact that I have no idea what to do in the future and how I don't know how to survive on my own. I know I'm still young and I still have time, but I feel like I should have at least the simple things figured out already, but I don't. I need the distraction of my own daydreams or else I just spiral.

​

Anyway this was really long-winded and all over the place, but I really needed to get this out of my system because I have no one else to talk to about this.",4.300117340286832,4.816246574967408,5.684907692307693,81.6268295958279,70.21251629726206,8.53495697522816,27.4651629726206,8.608573733854374,1.8692221851368969,2941,93,599,46,50,994,290,767,0.11699999999999999,0.807,0.075,-0.9893,2,2,1,0,0,1,100.0,0,0,1,7,30,33,4,8,32,1,50,8,5,12,12,140,112,56,0,14,26,2,8,7,0,3,3,0,0,6,48,40,0,0,23,7,0,11,21,15,1,2,3,13,86,18,106,97,25,95,4,0,4,0,16,52,4,14,36,426,134,9,0.0590628897002296,0.0,0.05763686042315677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061171341293886336,0.06517736747599501,0.09446514310887863,0.04914505566003617,0.0639946163139841,0.07176787574121106,0.08032958069788848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585745159107316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05549152910480347,0.045415716444870434,0.0,0.14401675743735026,0.0,0.1005163378950337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06560555568158315,0.0,0.0,0.06030981401088292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06248070584314741,0.05087744969108643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047156911434557684,0.0,0.0,0.07618135541138837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973578622402749,0.0,0.10462437895993056,0.0,0.0,0.03901048161162235,0.0,0.09952606386797654,0.0,0.05308191686545356,0.0,0.0,0.1329243427470484,0.20904780171594975,0.16877816081266964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06171584427499178,0.05665850566928396,0.033566801321467755,0.04953914966073085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06061556447652663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058165049041601524,0.0,0.0,0.06667481331191623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06150491078044828,0.16229709775619452,0.04814413812456507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079161270338305,0.08343573138486879,0.20198601168016095,0.0,0.05215361368760398,0.05226879878395438,0.14879385593793293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11827481251727424,0.0,0.05933661129582386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06265639234087944,0.0,0.06917374258046374,0.04714343506588694,0.1255490092246722,0.08683603958571579,0.17517753731824914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061976567292937525,0.0,0.08004508524095066,0.04491998909276601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047338550339235,0.2062857484975348,0.06170814884147244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0600881923172669,0.06367978466186212,0.056515208825633115,0.0,0.059374517428328874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3361324949549736,0.2270231972021578,0.060726487522224676,0.0,0.0,0.06690674040811599,0.050439385089849485,0.0,0.0,0.05913225619434515,0.0,0.047065476192975284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606272075207543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008758955336608,0.04546949804295156,0.05841470814770619,0.0,0.04180501732484748,0.0,0.09433540001849652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06702386730491151,0.16699822368563444,0.0,0.0,0.04747251347854618,0.05162356890024308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695503794191282,0.11353534459484133,0.0,0.09377867406636443,0.06888009191076208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080199650233106,0.06424346365812267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05101137320300464,0.0,0.048733069568891584,0.13934729044760416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05310463100840623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386903601377465,0.0,0.17199394854955374,0.11996246294295017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176787574121106,0.038034564514043814
mentalhealth,jimmycraccorn44,2020/04/03,Struggle with trusting others when wanting to open up I have difficulty in trusting and opening up to people in my life. I describe myself as really quiet and introverted (always have been). However whenever i go through mental struggles i naturally want to talk to the closest person to me and let some things of my chest. Problem is im very sensitive because ive expressed my emotions to other people (family members) when i was a child and have gotten comments such as 'get over it' 'stop acting weak' continuously throughout my life. These comments were even made when i was having panic attacks or meltdowns. I always felt misunderstood and lonely. Whenever i open up to people it seemed my trust was continually broken. Writing this is even a lot for me. I would like to try and trust others with talking as i face my fear of judgement and lack of acceptance. Any advice how to gain trust back with people?,6.856478641840089,8.131189981927715,7.426779846659367,68.69483570646223,64.8433734939759,9.168893756845565,34.970427163198245,9.339509955726095,3.535669879518073,731,33,112,13,11,241,104,166,0.182,0.6829999999999999,0.134,-0.802,1,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,8,15,1,4,3,0,14,5,2,2,0,28,22,15,0,5,1,0,1,1,0,1,3,1,0,2,8,13,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,8,2,20,7,26,12,3,19,0,1,0,0,8,10,0,4,8,89,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845942846228632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528276716664543,0.0,0.0,0.1033142631594628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728367094880474,0.0,0.11682100764368165,0.0,0.09261211777771687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17089526483294934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006901631098132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322144308857832,0.17095795107552664,0.0,0.0,0.1458719004595221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937458307562817,0.0,0.08634252326524791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641051553282778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535368607521266,0.21461835190246845,0.07422291935639881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12916126890665625,0.0,0.1437551827361701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531047460371445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17825134561322964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4213028813119563,0.13265511858249546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537178225995473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973270955949061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830688562179444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12701616843790564,0.0,0.3176501571815459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24422324666721856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093227148240604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10314715572389116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12535410070032188,0.17921869516543232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792321687156142,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JSennk,2020/04/03,"It sucks having derealisation during a lockdown Lol It’s like what’s going on,  but x2",0.7974509803921563,3.1890624705882367,4.6670588235294135,71.69509803921571,100.76470588235293,4.6196078431372545,17.43137254901961,6.42735559955562,0.4283490196078432,70,2,12,1,3,26,15,17,0.107,0.6709999999999999,0.223,0.2263,0,1,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7583226029626235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6518794595904914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kamyarb,2020/04/03,"I don’t really think I exist I always sought death since I was a child, now I’m a theoretical physicist and still don’t really think I exist and still seek death, life for me it’s just a fraction of experiences which it ends. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. I don't really like people, don't like to be around them, they’re only distraction to me. I don't feel anything. I suffer from a severe identity crisis to a point that some days I don't even recognize myself in the mirror. I feel trapped, I look at the universe as an entire thing and the fact that I'm just teeny tiny part of it makes me feel that I don't really exist. no, not really.",3.741134920634924,4.010606335714286,5.648095238095237,82.27468253968256,71.35714285714286,9.07936507936508,22.6984126984127,9.150863307647796,1.3951031746031752,517,10,113,10,9,180,81,140,0.242,0.722,0.036000000000000004,-0.9816,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,0,7,6,1,1,10,0,11,1,0,1,1,17,21,4,2,0,3,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,9,5,0,0,6,0,0,0,10,4,0,0,1,4,19,2,12,19,2,9,1,1,1,0,2,4,1,1,7,74,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149112257380771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746979456455728,0.1595297392335596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557188941141362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587217382730807,0.0,0.0,0.11836268972527166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17529610269145324,0.0,0.0,0.2718330971945383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848594650164656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657723229653853,0.1751002488244172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048640156719062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11962020084473915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13629287596043435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19406069468971776,0.0,0.12423763439218535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16940590113219225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5740140243674171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202449747370826,0.0,0.14823957327440404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862254250963176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905531340070698,0.2296536419608028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19593167025564898,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowingAwayThisAccx,2020/04/03,"Throwaway as i dont feel comfortable to share from my original account..Fear of relapse So basicly i used to suffer from clinical depression,social anxiety and generalized anxiety disorder.I am currently 18 and for last year i spent a lot of time on working on myself,healing from childhood traumas etc..I have come really far and i can say im no longer depressed and started enyoying [life.As](https://life.As) i used to supress alot of my emotions and generaly would runaway from any problem that came i decided to stop that..I have solved most of my problems but i spent last year almost constantly on thinking about it and solving it...And now when i start doing something and focus on my hobbies or doing something for fun i start having a guilt feelinges that im not working on myself and that if i continue to do to that il relapse and i am really really scared of coming back to that stage and basicly my fear of relapse is stopping me from going on and living my life to the fullest.Any advice would be thankful..",4.25696482716798,6.55040019072165,5.22244390539721,77.94587325651909,72.8659793814433,8.069860521528199,33.5767131594906,8.841846274778883,3.2942326258338386,823,43,137,17,17,269,110,194,0.16399999999999998,0.772,0.064,-0.9359,1,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,5,12,0,3,4,0,14,2,0,3,0,36,28,17,0,5,4,0,2,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,6,14,0,2,4,0,2,4,3,8,0,0,3,3,19,4,29,22,3,30,0,2,0,0,2,7,0,6,18,94,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12137845216837592,0.0,0.0,0.12438029706201435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689367321307918,0.0,0.19004356001254288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551130053112238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14206534782496766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21399514388818,0.0,0.1342289601069402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698354602544563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455754469798439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13972169328132295,0.0,0.0,0.13852912647197266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795458894373383,0.06280527968864684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059249748432166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26834038030339474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024985888226174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263203660730787,0.0,0.0,0.10968140240058724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560053384535224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377080674826105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387200127276712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877830552167696,0.12435780242104545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19124881131629215,0.0,0.0,0.263753512174744,0.0,0.0,0.2076934565225967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435764896948815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958998387460366,0.0,0.0,0.0724289703442869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21455843826274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18085551649715575,0.0,0.0,0.1764731705164796,0.0,0.0,0.15997681006666167
mentalhealth,G-Minus,2020/04/03,"Depersonalization Not sure if it’s dissociation or depersonalization, but it’s this state of “%?<>,>?<€?%” (which is the best way I can explain it) 

I’m not sure what’s happening to me when I feel dissociation, but the first time I did I couldn’t stop feeling it for two weeks. I think it’s because I was 15 and still didn’t know how in depth the world runs. I can’t really explain it. It’s like feeling like nothing bad could possibly happen to your emotional state because it’s never happened before. You feel like the world is “easy” or something. Anyway I think I was probably having cognitive dissonance which confused me and shocked me. I was appalled at the idea that I’d ever end up feeling anything other than my emotions. It felt like I was experiencing an emotion from a different universe and it felt like this emotion wasn’t actually felt by any organism on earth before. Trying to explain it is like describing the way the color green would look like if it had never been seen before.

I used to think I was the only person who has ever felt this before. This whole storm in my brain was caused by a rumor about a girl I grew up with in my school doing something I never thought she’d do. Since I had no idea what was going on I associated myself with this girl. I started constantly trying to figure out how to become a different version of myself. Every time someone insulted the girl I felt angry at them. It got to a point where I stood out in the street and didn’t care whether or not I lived or died. Safety wasn’t a concern for me anymore. I had went from being content with my life to being miserable on an entirely different state of consciousness. Eventually since I couldn’t make sense of the world around me I started to get depressed. I had been admitted to a hospital. Then I was diagnosed with mild depression and I was put on Prozac. I didn’t actually have depression until I got out of the hospital. I start hating myself because my life, while seemingly normal, is starting to make less and less sense and I feel like I’m going crazy. I’ve been put on 5 different medicines in the past, each of them have their own negative effect on me. I start feeling a desire to control people, I start feeling like I’m probably just making everything up and like I’ve wasted 2 years of my life “pretending” to have a mental illness. I get diagnosed with C-PTSD which I didn’t find out about until this year.  Sometimes I feel like all my emotions are more intense than they should be. Sometimes I find myself thinking that either the world sucks or I’m just less than everyone. Either way it makes me feel like the world is against me.

Also this girl I know has been prominent in my life for years and I never noticed until I got into 9th grade. She might have started out as a crush that young kids have, but it turned into a much bigger thing to me. Not sure if it’s autism or something (There’s a good chance I have autism) but I feel way different about her than most dudes seem to feel like when it comes to a girl they grew up with.  I have no idea why I care about her so intensely and I creep myself out sometimes because I feel like it’s just not normal. I’ve been seeing her less and less each year and it feels awful, but I accept letting it go because I feel like I need to. It hurts a lot and I wish I didn’t feel this way.",4.237306856775696,5.5714678155922055,5.1277710124529605,82.54390875990579,70.99400299850075,8.023608603861334,27.555273383716308,8.480668928828255,1.892796432396047,2671,93,523,43,49,871,263,667,0.121,0.718,0.161,0.9693,5,0,3,0,0,0,61.0,0,2,5,4,20,34,3,2,31,1,57,9,1,10,10,133,131,40,1,13,25,0,21,15,0,3,8,0,0,7,40,31,0,2,43,1,0,10,22,11,0,2,38,27,85,23,77,82,18,89,0,5,5,0,26,37,1,15,49,365,125,2,0.0,0.0,0.08824180746699264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036156440988267764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03074606832244893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044838677172207984,0.0,0.0,0.03720605683017858,0.04024873406485311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0377505709748158,0.13780568208115634,0.04993368318717726,0.1538901194600312,0.0,0.04744775701444084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0504721320882216,0.0,0.0,0.0921943677440696,0.04644571892631722,0.0,0.03894658806093382,0.0,0.048858678941464284,0.050709692802088216,0.03609852331472944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682444808733235,0.09177952506065433,0.04692346421527235,0.2361873352068463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542900335274572,0.04004487855842087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08179463710139863,0.03809350345120945,0.04320250646888095,0.04063410336398505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3657729889218213,0.2906985407330786,0.21705557784076132,0.0,0.08264685998215172,0.03845775181755302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047243357880651635,0.0,0.07708596194550121,0.03792212200965441,0.1084817626979662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11994386320727712,0.0,0.0,0.04463800939362845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04840094456673707,0.15311831688885605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04969524414587957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04623287143654451,0.12773977782060567,0.33132834903460795,0.0,0.039923489100045284,0.0,0.03796713506932373,0.0,0.0,0.038438073088599665,0.0,0.0,0.12071884968195085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04556359246238381,0.047963345582394734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033236409088134036,0.033524515403619,0.13948275034371918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859735259189627,0.043382638422614014,0.05147476091751788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034386163644599926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04316047230627151,0.03134467298399245,0.03947783408148325,0.0,0.0,0.04274045138194555,0.05097033015413161,0.0,0.0,0.09749350079821407,0.0,0.05285102382126556,0.09090215353317883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028964302113521082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045757490449057664,0.03602852981643533,0.082319571852908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480053802223803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03830842685723004,0.10442043500815593,0.134149033928108,0.0,0.22401161201313116,0.0,0.036106781947518415,0.03779969651257042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278368130533785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030037193510717927,0.11588144513635458,0.0,0.03589369563470037,0.052727575409851984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613926751286628,0.049178245566401296,0.04416606860815675,0.0,0.0,0.03904910624692823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17943799473877795,0.03626676146143329,0.0,0.0,0.04191246489253755,0.04079727267340005,0.05047817103878298,0.05199217399773571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032117681509182566,0.0,0.0,0.11646153847723208
mentalhealth,xXImTheTrashManXx,2020/04/03,"How To Tell My Coworkers I Had A Panic Attack Alt account because.

I work in software so I am still able to work from home during lockdown. I am very thankful I still have a job but working from home for a month has been killing me. I’ve been coping more or less well enough and I was able to get a reasonable amount of work done up until yesterday.

I didn’t sleep well last night and I had a panic attack today and I kinda just closed my laptop and rolled into bed for a few hours. I am worried they’re going to ask me where I was for 4 hours and why I wasn’t responding to email/slack and why I didn’t get anything done this afternoon and I won’t know what to tell them. I am not really close with any of my coworkers so I don’t really want to tell them straight up. I am the youngest of them by at least 15 years so I feel like there’s a pretty big disconnect. I trust my boss and I might start telling him about these things but I have not yet and I’m not sure if I want to start now.

What do you all think?",1.0045909090909113,2.650180277272728,2.591818181818184,96.07272727272728,80.31818181818181,6.036363636363636,19.63636363636364,6.961326702584282,0.0518363636363639,791,19,190,9,20,259,125,220,0.11199999999999999,0.762,0.126,0.2271,1,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,3,4,14,11,3,2,8,0,23,1,1,3,2,33,36,18,1,3,8,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,3,0,5,13,0,0,4,0,1,1,8,5,2,0,11,1,33,6,25,23,7,27,0,0,0,0,11,10,0,4,17,129,38,7,0.2209225155449486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511744316321302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909002032376153,0.0,0.1032663648435449,0.251331254842251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733615747377328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260804360615767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413600743441883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05585253091919761,0.07891354462385856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542289613166773,0.0,0.06277767837278145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22160329601247425,0.0,0.21756417635989725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961575388749499,0.0,0.12220901552832952,0.0,0.060706618460294424,0.09004066815224783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053965790933982634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171819384487763,0.0,0.0,0.08816912209211797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366040756865057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592049715768915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11237881069360928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152862050241188,0.11357257028660635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054103157178484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563700935846618,0.0,0.17642900629144315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410842819526814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3861920322806469,0.1016978852188708,0.0,0.0,0.07338555137068886,0.07077911375050061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470435647244837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09114210610105536,0.1303058235734173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198635873202421,0.0,0.19934820798018305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3216684449823674,0.1121787691849981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711334283908778
mentalhealth,Bad54,2020/04/03,"Looking for Contamination OCD help So I moved to Quebec from Ontario (Canada) and I am couch surfing until I get a place. I need to get diagnosed and get help for my ocd as it’s been affecting me for 4-6 years now and I can’t fight it alone, I don’t know who to contact as I know healthcare isn’t free for Canadians in Quebec who aren’t permanent residents of Quebec. Will I have to go to Ontario or what can I do. I’ve been calling 811 for an hr and still haven’t gotten through.",3.2123855755894577,3.766892291262135,5.041775312066574,85.1233009708738,72.68932038834951,8.215811373092926,28.30651872399445,8.418075326091056,1.8085295423023573,378,14,84,6,7,130,65,103,0.049,0.857,0.09300000000000001,0.6249,1,1,0,0,1,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,2,0,12,1,0,1,0,9,21,9,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,1,2,5,1,0,0,3,1,11,2,17,17,0,8,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,1,4,55,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28230985904794936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27833385262588706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766621634176839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4272341654548475,0.0,0.15491304832155392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36540820146180586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996048137726333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288978880661825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28970856571171233,0.0,0.20211403257894733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28478726202603405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21768211158315195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755320762924482
mentalhealth,Rambling-Philosopher,2020/04/03,Was this a mistake? I have very bad anxiety and childhood trauma issues and due to the current pandemic I haven’t been able to get an appointment with the intern therapist I’ve been seeing sense last July. I’ve called the clinic twice sense my last session (March 5) and they have just simply told me that she isn’t available because of covid-19 and they would get back in touch later. Without going into to much detail I’m currently in a very rough environment and my therapist has been one of the few good points of my week. Things have recently gotten much worse and I’m really struggling to cope without the help of therapy. I’ve been really worried about the prospect of never seeing her again so I did the only thing else I could think of. I reached out to her on Facebook messenger but now I’m worried she’ll get mad or weirded out by this. Am I overreacting or was texting her a stupid move? God I’m such a stupid ass fucking mess right now.,3.262620320855614,5.4690500213903785,4.159893048128343,84.83042780748664,75.524064171123,7.180748663101605,26.508021390374328,8.124751697461798,1.802702673796792,762,29,144,13,17,245,116,187,0.20600000000000002,0.757,0.038,-0.9862,2,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,0,8,11,4,1,12,0,17,3,1,0,1,21,31,10,0,3,6,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,10,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,10,0,2,9,4,17,1,22,19,3,25,0,0,2,2,10,8,2,2,15,94,22,1,0.14214115992655255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087375982863492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929777813333433,0.11868193129845485,0.08664793178467843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14514201661941753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134881500699022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874069996336632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13140721191996124,0.22278866820479284,0.0,0.08078209683057576,0.1192212611047372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527422329170923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483584415305996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23172803333607425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15107355811237072,0.2089802150349866,0.0,0.10962802525991187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631852860836464,0.1081047572501186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343693402137148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18211853356272964,0.0,0.14034724739016627,0.0,0.0,0.12138777393117285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265362027668973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14859680250979732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16255080410093445,0.3300736844073435,0.18886454136100989,0.09107831587245024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358219696354089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345626863318441,0.0,0.0,0.11401706467048416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2740380117001521,0.0,0.0,0.2887024952030197,0.14485398542417902,0.10097300178271168,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HazardousDuke01,2020/04/03,"First job, not going so great. I managed to land amy first job in Feb (software engineer) this year and the impact it has had on me isn't too good. It's my first job (corporate) but each and everyday, I go to bed and wish I never wake up because facing a new day is dreadful. It's really broken my self-confidence, spiked my anxiety to levels i never thought it could reach and to some extent even thought of ending it all. I've received talks from family and friends too. Tried making myself happy but the thought of work deprives it all. I've had trouble sleeping for the past two months and I'm honestly tired of being sad and the state I'm in and being in a third world country in Africa where youth unemployment is high and ""chasing your passion"" is usually disregarded, that's a whole other challenge by itself. Advice?",5.781801242236027,6.2826096956521775,6.3734720496894415,78.04381055900623,66.95031055900621,9.172919254658387,31.62795031055901,9.120678840339163,2.695367204968945,655,25,121,11,10,214,107,161,0.184,0.675,0.141,-0.8431,5,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,0,5,5,11,0,1,7,0,10,5,3,1,4,25,19,12,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,10,10,0,1,3,0,0,3,4,4,0,5,5,0,10,7,16,11,6,29,0,2,0,1,4,11,0,1,14,82,20,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409074447268512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110310157815385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08790103129162556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512941192079475,0.0,0.0,0.0929950073173666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12771556550041646,0.0,0.0,0.09524062687875197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593591046883466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.367961174916881,0.0,0.0,0.11140609048871614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639007296551116,0.12094543501669172,0.0,0.15897748177912654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350017562350818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235183684339412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4292792241496415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09625248414224498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509651056333325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224269242284348,0.13926616861760338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376521624311776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237616286828182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15042871123454493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14430093785771145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589992628698308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34342845833814617,0.0,0.16573301014409106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790016231665802,0.0,0.14085932162315856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15881240394849916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099057836421465,0.16581920442159825,0.0,0.0,0.10497698825083844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285801194258103
mentalhealth,Riven278,2020/04/03,"suffering (tw? and long) for years i’ve noticed there’s something wrong with me. the way i act the way i think..but the thing is, i don’t have any hope for it to be fixed. i don’t like to self diagnose, but there are some thing that don’t need to be diagnosed and it’s clear signs yet people still think i’m doing it for attention, when they *know* i isolate my room to avoid attention. it’s backwards and doesn’t make sense and i hate it. i’m also not big on labels but i don’t hate them enough to just downright refuse any labels. i do have some non related labels i am proud to have but for other things...everything’s murky.

ever since the end of january this year, i’ve been numb. my mother pushed me into running away to point i was up at like 1 or 2 in the morning half studying to a super important exam with tears in my eyes searching online for a greyhound bus to take me away from this house. i ending up not running away because, surprise, i’m became numb. 
ive found the experience to be rather nice actually. nothing gets to me, i tried to trigger myself but just ending up laughing because i couldn’t remember what having feelings felt like. there was a short period of euphoria because i felt invincible. but then i started getting stress rashes *all over* my body. like i still keep getting them today, they’re everywhere! but even though i couldn’t find it in myself to be stressed about anything, the patches kept appearing.
anyway, sorry i was getting off track.

ahem, so what i’m trying to say is, i’m tired of feeling this this i guess. i figure if i had a diagnosis for everything i had, i could get therapy (which my mother said she’ll let me go to but never did because that was damn near two years ago) and i could get medicine to help me cope with life. but the thing is i have like...two people who care and are supportive of me. my family is not one of them. at all.
my family tells me my thoughts are not important, my body is not mine to use, my feelings don’t matter, i do things for attention, im a bitch, no one likes me because of my attitude. the “attitude” *they* created. my mother blew me off when i called out my abuser and she forgives him even though the effects that it has on me is painfully clear. she practically told me she didn’t believe me and to get over it. those words weren’t used but it felt like that. 
hell, i was slapped when my mother was trying get me to unlock my phone after my friend called her when i told her i was going to commit suicide that night. she even knew i used to cut but wasn’t concerned at all. she was just mad i was stealing her box cutter.

my depression comes off as being lazy and stubborn. my adhd(or add idfk) comes off as a purposeful forgetful airhead that’s bored and still lazy. my tourettes comes off as a desperate need for attention. my dyscalculia comes off as an excuse to slack. my failed relationships comes off as me being a bitch. (again not self diagnosing but it’s better than just being lost in the dark about what’s wrong with me) 
anyway..i guess what i’m trying to say is that i’ll forever be lost and suffering in my illness because i don’t have the strength alone to be diagnosed but no one that has the power cares enough to help me get diagnosed. 
the only true medical thing i am diagnosed for is asthma when i was just a kid because i nearly died and went to the hospital. that’s the only reason why.
and sometimes it makes me want to do something drastic so i can be diagnosed again. 
i guess on the brink of suicide isn’t enough for them. my memory loss is not concerning to anyone. it’s a terrible feeling.
sorry for the vent or whatever.",2.1350277655016043,4.307240180081859,3.552572680283614,87.9804809484465,78.98635743519782,6.803520166016562,23.693657168110985,7.8749477477759875,1.2779028072939682,2864,98,583,49,71,939,302,733,0.195,0.6709999999999999,0.134,-0.9957,2,2,2,0,1,3,86.0,0,0,6,10,33,47,9,3,29,0,69,19,4,8,9,113,131,44,3,10,28,4,7,6,1,1,15,3,1,3,38,25,0,5,22,0,0,13,23,27,0,5,30,11,99,20,90,85,8,78,1,7,1,0,40,36,4,10,33,405,137,2,0.0,0.06375650472860762,0.05251117157727112,0.0,0.06466962343652533,0.0,0.047699657806167056,0.0,0.0,0.055731328436559285,0.0,0.04303214385241588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731858113677254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037625470954730775,0.0,0.04428136027594432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516698785038302,0.0,0.0,0.22961617023338016,0.0,0.0,0.06062587477022121,0.0,0.04759091091847776,0.0,0.11954240968453995,0.0,0.0,0.10989283483062172,0.0,0.10972654350666516,0.0,0.0,0.2317644013334595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859264244864853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04634680403789774,0.3823148423926212,0.05584668200115425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298008273859006,0.16680153021604893,0.0,0.10662375144206472,0.04867457213564884,0.0,0.0,0.0967226050727906,0.05263687998731889,0.10145528020188042,0.0,0.10883258588503866,0.0,0.15499921885525805,0.0,0.049181715214399145,0.0,0.0,0.05900030753241741,0.041573768431558286,0.0,0.25302333763242024,0.0,0.061163361451367027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17783461056717498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062532256499142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07213593091561657,0.0,0.0,0.05344585191014069,0.0,0.06208995727390649,0.0,0.0,0.05812444755952643,0.0,0.0,0.04782914085756759,0.0,0.0,0.029572779239532013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05502476239332285,0.038007864882467386,0.1840232455007948,0.0,0.0,0.04762049565037293,0.0,0.0,0.11748077919163664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183769700808651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054208299743760575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979943434693575,0.041501884682657066,0.0,0.0,0.05049739924012806,0.0,0.051632513772719935,0.061263477710378135,0.0,0.0,0.10938992445490944,0.08185044213656327,0.057258041437364425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461068844092107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05086820499788312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05532603584152515,0.0,0.05777221337970561,0.06095667424374416,0.0,0.051185996696794335,0.08558435272130313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227193017703377,0.0,0.0,0.044512504887518005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285172355802134,0.05321984472540799,0.12047263651883035,0.03808726605541962,0.0,0.12891912414589662,0.0,0.1232792238646574,0.0,0.0,0.11771965047002955,0.06106338495853305,0.0,0.0,0.04045871123917303,0.0,0.04703264653989755,0.0,0.06153686259399455,0.0,0.1787461371675776,0.06895904133030595,0.10573685619534204,0.04271943343230195,0.0,0.06184711944355875,0.051005951211105606,0.10283625391985138,0.0,0.14613487143153814,0.0,0.10512985049377924,0.0,0.0,0.13942468158340102,0.0,0.0,0.031738758078598016,0.08542435473329563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04988276415397863,0.048555500997392184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766641305328195,0.0,0.10395636724834394
mentalhealth,Uhhhfrickme,2020/04/03,"How am I supposed to deal with declining mental health during the quarantine? I think my mental health is declining again like it did when I first got diagnosed with depression like 3 months ago. I've been taking meds and it's been going good, but now I'm starting to feel my mental health decline again, and I don't know how to deal with it because of the quarantine. Any advice please?",4.3508,6.213995746666669,4.703666666666667,83.60350000000003,71.53333333333333,8.200000000000001,25.833333333333336,8.841846274778883,1.9635333333333336,311,10,58,6,6,98,50,75,0.033,0.846,0.121,0.6608,0,2,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,0,2,0,6,4,0,2,0,11,14,6,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,4,1,6,3,7,10,0,9,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,10,34,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205156106766264,0.14700228468614146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277315155365393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10109117632413477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419361901575229,0.14283301798846434,0.16831853394455648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385090957263085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14105874704529614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424757205776817,0.1390941166129003,0.1326330046196818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5288229789132746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911383081697505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203672711510084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18420475270413889,0.0,0.5013665354738335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323675214349739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820364896571649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737851768973755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468691100015301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10626005606281737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,what_is_serotonin,2020/04/03,"I'm confused at this particular though, and am looking for input from others Edit: I meant ""Thought""*** in the title, my bad






So to start, I suspect I have Depersonalization/Derealization during to the symptoms I've had since 14: feelings of not being in my body, or rather a clear separation between body and mind. I'm always existential, worrying about the future and reminiscing on the past, never present; like when I look in the mirror, or when I look at pictures if myself, logically I know that it's me, but I lack the connection to that ""version"" of myself, as if it is no longer a part of me. I'm very apathetic, nihilistic, and overall feel that nothing is important or has a point in the long run, other than creating a happy existence for ourselves

But honestly, I'm not here for that, just wanted to let everyone know since my mind can be very, very scattered. I apologize in advance; I had a thought just a little bit ago that...is strange, to say the least

I've always been fascinated by absurdism, always taking nothing seriously unless ABSOLUTELY necessary; and sometimes not even then. I feel as though making jokes about life and existence itself is a happy way to live. Instead of fearing dwath, laughing in its face and saying ""well shit man, where have you been?"", as of to greet it and anticipate it. Not in a suicidal manner, mind you, but something akin to meeting a huge corporate boss; I'd still be shaking, kn the verge of throwing up, especially as something as scary and uncertain as death itself, but keeping a smile on my face, knowing that death is the ultimate punchline to life or existence 

So I thought ""the biggest joke would be to work my entire life towards creating one song to sum it all up, become as well known as possible as to ger everyone I know invested into said song. Then on my death bed, or right before i die, i would reveal that the song was nothing more than 3:00mins of silence with a black screen""

And to me, it makes sense, but it just seems extremely unhealthy in nature...i just can't decide whether that was *really* okay or not to think, and if it should concern me or not (which to be fair, my anxiety has completely fucked what i KNOW i should be anxious about and not; i worry and stress every waking moment that I breathe, so I can't really trust myself here)",7.738245979749856,7.171753847031965,8.082162001191186,71.0360065515188,63.04109589041096,11.179035139964263,36.85169743895176,10.568078804390687,3.8929736748064334,1827,78,328,39,23,603,227,438,0.165,0.695,0.14,-0.9401,0,0,2,0,0,0,73.0,0,2,0,2,23,20,2,5,23,1,29,12,7,3,3,81,58,48,5,10,29,0,3,1,0,4,4,6,1,1,24,15,0,1,19,5,1,4,11,9,2,1,11,14,35,11,61,36,7,42,0,0,5,1,8,24,2,13,14,238,59,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786044564685837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22135247558361704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783563115215037,0.1001767696118524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403937407910847,0.0,0.09793384717570212,0.07545533635359496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968094181996676,0.19699441401408008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0929733635495746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202997015435638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058568568512604564,0.0,0.0747119600890134,0.16946427325501867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978329097139373,0.13450923947390275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819780030000351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887909781221314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881783210575476,0.0,0.0,0.2436655046703805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067552555232182,0.18789993668873592,0.043321805814190435,0.08887498919703644,0.07830107115448434,0.07847400483611362,0.22339234958737586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183816276045774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686074304676982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683911214029784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552562765357985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008803102850136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960256742975286,0.08464969593829118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382591803151544,0.09996700033318708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361411198542876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572740605407867,0.08434960824046102,0.14103479641742456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807257932405252,0.0,0.0,0.09102294077674992,0.1467046689079669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653168591330275,0.08770119452392086,0.0,0.06276415773937748,0.0,0.07081544639916962,0.0,0.10157616250757877,0.0,0.0,0.09699534091491924,0.0,0.0,0.09216659717310302,0.06667207172214565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05681893971220992,0.1742441873211318,0.2111925745403016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194968638652844,0.052302426107415714,0.07038556754721671,0.0,0.0,0.1594577708892365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455597920878241,0.18010620324466095,0.0,0.12598342088115327,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reliccdream,2020/04/03,"Clean from Self-Harm. I haven't cut in almost 10 days. People often think cutting is the only form of self-harm, but that's so far from the truth. To stop cutting, I had to stop harming myself in other ways too. I'm slowly eating better, doing more things I enjoy, giving myself a break. 

I think for a lot of people who cut, they realize at some point that it's an addiction. To come clean from an addiction, you have to consider all the factors that led you to where you are, and all the factors that keep you stagnant. 

10 days to some might seem like nothing, but to other people who self-harm, it seems impossible. To anyone out there who sees this and wants to get better, I have so much hope in you. It will never be easy, but slowly you'll get to a better place, and you deserve it too! 

Stay safe and take care of yourself.",4.261363636363637,4.801362452380957,5.0461255411255435,86.08675324675328,70.30952380952381,7.299567099567097,23.60606060606061,6.980632752743323,0.7465761904761905,644,14,133,5,11,209,95,168,0.085,0.672,0.243,0.9862,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,7,1,3,7,14,4,0,9,0,11,3,0,1,4,31,26,9,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,2,0,15,6,1,4,5,0,0,2,2,5,0,0,1,1,15,9,22,21,8,19,0,0,1,0,12,9,0,9,6,94,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29697099704849705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363914183089338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09523894975319833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613914929432095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887189314117365,0.0,0.0,0.117330083122333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756842140685398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393735432367022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232484495028389,0.13066195770675446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528406888809372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106684719915205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06654375418319818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11579813624473828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444938723567516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012765777832633,0.0,0.1050510680573324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13069408196239754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359139630837072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832859002360066,0.0,0.1423070982695841,0.0,0.12875943601231254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10853917142944856,0.2479950796456232,0.4262801413046771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14517830796286132,0.0,0.2277499393210009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241054979545122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048973445017187,0.17455161372431854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803382897057519,0.10811460457109306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drunkdadalert,2020/04/03,"Help! My mental health became complete trash in less than a week! I have ADHD, anxiety and depression. I haven’t had depression symptoms in a few years and I mainly got my anxiety under control with very sparse episodes. I was feeling 99% normal. Well isolation kicks in and Im an absolute wreck now. Im extremely social and his isolation is my worst enemy. I live with my fiancé but he is a social recluse and I feel bad for relying on him so much. He’s fine being alone and im just crumbling and I don’t want to be needy or feel like a burden. 

My first week was good. I managed to keep myself really busy with art and cleaning and a ton of self care. This week im dying because I cant get to sleep or stay asleep. The lack of sleep is making me feel sick and giving me heart palpitations. I’ve completely regressed back into depression and I just want to disappear. Im so frustrated and hopeless that when I ask my fiancé for help it devolves into a fight. I can’t keep my emotions in check and this is the worst I’ve felt in years. I thrive on working a ton and now im unemployed. 

My fiancé wants me to be positive and be his rock but I can’t even help myself and I feel like I’m going to ruin this relationship by being a whiny weak bitch. I hate where I am and I don’t know how to get out because im not allowed to do the things that make my life fulfilling.",1.1882372799614205,3.2793668181818205,3.356906197251025,88.56066433566437,81.86713286713287,6.742030383409697,22.099831203279482,7.873277556716777,1.1074693995659521,1074,35,228,20,29,366,150,286,0.259,0.62,0.121,-0.9937,3,3,0,0,1,1,21.0,0,0,0,3,12,20,4,0,12,0,21,9,4,5,0,49,44,25,1,5,7,0,6,2,0,0,5,0,1,1,7,23,0,3,7,2,1,2,7,14,1,1,5,6,35,6,28,34,9,25,0,5,0,0,15,12,1,2,12,147,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10186166142567198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778287867378284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967802381467944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923652338567187,0.0,0.0,0.0651730408756205,0.0707687062977244,0.10333438238976486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641559537651858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777325845980633,0.0,0.09506238617563906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21900370886049936,0.0,0.08796457303222534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534042125693128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05598131906028898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21427888834050504,0.1211010948919926,0.08138018600430268,0.0,0.0,0.07209441534176599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885642582890876,0.08130681171612096,0.04816945951394186,0.07109030262027177,0.0677880608141739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08368016946287178,0.0,0.09009292058010647,0.0,0.10043766824556236,0.1704328565968297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6408661034761971,0.0,0.0,0.15067215466613182,0.0,0.0,0.04658033039685197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059866503907674486,0.08281615532502375,0.0,0.07484214414627917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315215369113772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541530391661534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06230628073727176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304404228103775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05429762084281516,0.0,0.0,0.09099749351210136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842022522772679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16963678437764887,0.1727985457658386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033987824744796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809516459221993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05630890528744599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993355128203768,0.14997594501134004,0.0,0.20396129573346086,0.0,0.0762068851560859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170423763316795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916169211022883
mentalhealth,Asleepyjester,2020/04/03,"Anxiety and false symptoms? So I'm not always the best at wording my thoughts so please bear with me. As you can probably tell from the title I am one of the many with anxiety, generally I have it pretty under control, but these last few weeks have been trying to say the least. I am in a part of canada with a really low count of Covid-19 but seeing the reports and all the news has been slowly grinding me down. At the end if last week I found myself with a slight sore throat and cough, and that has caused my anxiety to rise back up. This causes my breathing to be a little shorter alot of the time. I'm without a fever or anything like that so I havent gone to get tested yet, I was just wondering if it's possible for my anxiety to give me some pseudo symptoms after reading so much about it?

Tldr: can my anxiety cause me to have psuedo symptoms of the sickness giving me the anxiety?",5.9651666666666685,5.519542961111113,6.704444444444442,79.055,66.6111111111111,9.644444444444446,31.88888888888889,9.120678840339163,2.5933222222222216,703,25,139,11,10,233,112,180,0.109,0.833,0.057,-0.7592,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,2,8,3,0,0,16,0,14,9,2,4,1,29,24,14,0,2,8,0,0,1,0,0,7,1,0,0,7,8,0,1,3,1,0,2,3,1,0,1,6,2,18,2,27,17,8,19,0,1,1,0,5,8,0,6,10,107,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814607276242177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5414008310547096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706499949653964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069832460034062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378405300351553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635096595785448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322939522661786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447105789397508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932901756500187,0.0,0.0,0.06162540322172438,0.22630190343032106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19229434253342625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057625717911154006,0.11821956542604913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11958549681662485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867087863175484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992778372943259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773125023992354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294766142131352,0.0,0.13297391586888832,0.0,0.12000027299040256,0.1271729311317229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179845924698716,0.0,0.07556350254741714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938006996853464,0.0,0.0,0.0939930088387325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.367793970937505,0.0,0.0,0.10309583500297577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936412467629512,0.06877915206079732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800821222153989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18922903865156784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370216742965962,0.12791464212902506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LivePossessi0n,2020/04/03,"anybody mind helping me out? I've been feeling drained lately. I mean that I don't enjoy my favorite things as much anymore, and I've been contemplating s\*\*\*ide. on top of that, I'm extremely impulsive and I hate myself for that. I'm not diagnosed with depression but I do have Aspergers and ADD. can someone explain this? is it normal? thanks.",1.964307692307692,4.794977200000002,3.101923076923079,84.40057692307694,92.3846153846154,6.292307692307693,29.57692307692308,7.554174236665415,2.5762615384615386,278,15,48,6,10,89,50,65,0.11900000000000001,0.718,0.163,0.4316,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,13,14,5,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,1,7,2,6,12,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,32,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934542566483949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548590765375825,0.30033326138031985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496164239996872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921409526548319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19833618649626736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337891888081815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322322908571101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29877563328368123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2175212637331256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28992013018155666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507159362347503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27242586261293605,0.0,0.0,0.19658345984736525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ten22atnight,2020/04/03,How do I help a friend who’s mental health isn’t the greatest? I really want to help her and be there for her,1.022400000000001,2.0589010399999985,2.9730000000000025,96.01150000000004,78.6,6.6000000000000005,16.5,7.1686216300943375,-0.3698000000000001,86,1,22,1,2,29,22,25,0.0,0.51,0.49,0.9245,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,3,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3356659371764233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4618150923550912,0.0,0.0,0.5824243451672245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4378376926044512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27832887004579304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25625822188352104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ratscience3,2020/04/03,Parents think having a kid makes them entitled to not paying him and getting him to work for free Is that alright? (warning this post contains talk of suicide) This is not my own story. Im helping a freind that is growing depressed. Together he and i have written  a story that he cant post himself because he wants to remain anonymous. Rest asured he will be reading the comments. Whats written is now his own story.  Basically i live in a country where im the only agnostic i know of and the country is 100 percent religious and that makes it so that i cant really let anyone know about it or else my life could be in danger so i need a way to move to another country where atleast non religious people are tolerated      I have to go to university to complete my education but that's where the problem gets worse ive had mental health issues since i was a kid and on top of that things havent really been ideal. Im almost 20 now and ive passed college and my dad wants me to work at his store which i do and i dont get paid a cent for it. I dont get any pocket money he thinks since hes my father im free labor so they wont let me continue my studies plus i cant get a job because you dont get a job just from passing college in my country.(edited)***\[*****6:04 PM*****\]***I need money for education which requires a a job which requires an education (nasty spiral). So that means i dont have a way out of anywhere ive lost touch with my irl friends  because my phone broke in highschool and they never got me a new one so i cant even ask my friends for help. I get told that im worthless by my parents everytime i ask for something or in general too. So today after id finally had had enough i decided to end it all and took out all the Aspirin i could find at home. Did some research because id have one shot at suicide because if i survive it will make things a lot worse than they already are but it turns out there is a high chance ill survive using aspirin or any other way for that matter so i didnt go through with it and decided to talk to friends (mental health is taboo in my country). My online friends helped me get my head straight today and calmed me down enough to not do it. The reason i made this post was because my friend said there's probably gonna be people out there that have gone through similar situations so i should make this post and here we are. If you've got any advice please do say it im desperate for advice.,2.411824482448246,4.220880100990101,3.863958145814582,87.80220184518456,76.70297029702971,6.571107110711073,26.92281728172817,7.435244526350478,1.4086336633663368,1941,78,401,25,44,641,226,505,0.086,0.812,0.102,0.4637,5,0,1,0,0,2,46.0,1,1,4,9,21,16,1,0,22,1,51,7,1,7,3,68,90,29,2,11,11,4,1,0,5,5,6,2,1,2,31,21,0,4,9,1,8,8,15,6,0,2,19,3,56,12,49,59,10,46,1,4,0,0,40,21,0,8,10,260,87,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149770640254733,0.0,0.0,0.062251250303221116,0.0,0.06860280812791583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682703425332795,0.06518749879592821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04346859775497992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11623546844081845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22737848336659075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518089558081545,0.0,0.0,0.09927054965027778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053544328637804055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914369494849248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05193253455960686,0.0,0.05506149199669635,0.12847021690173974,0.0,0.041060703870333205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681008877113846,0.05681949331948208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401502720436872,0.0,0.2598374489309617,0.0,0.07066185455780008,0.0,0.09944122567163263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380125648492962,0.13216118501135238,0.0,0.0,0.12500764847932228,0.06568282739982215,0.06235854956031558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4029060367752503,0.06488617545941955,0.1850734048919544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06833069262078748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271398976462758,0.04391037635354494,0.0,0.0,0.05489458214626244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786260218200381,0.0528521431435656,0.0,0.05882389945466032,0.165987767097757,0.0,0.0,0.06771806591506223,0.0,0.0,0.12529938768815246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607366118048816,0.0,0.09219205566557136,0.04794700732156963,0.06004125651171099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425190886069575,0.047280789515993786,0.0,0.0,0.1380581482816539,0.0,0.0,0.08619751252981317,0.0,0.0,0.0682406754652671,0.0,0.0,0.2381551285663193,0.0,0.0670265188356019,0.059485403868174816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06218380310273443,0.0,0.07965151831772349,0.06391800916635375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05913503391831775,0.04943767756473609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285033627087753,0.06987829002900232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04785917828089805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13600117166095313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999349270962216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260195808464124,0.07966818097141219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785405577903656,0.0594032133398313,0.06906980201663261,0.0,0.06761982236294121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053692310440063715,0.0,0.0,0.07333539079530006,0.14803576487512882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051660345021888,0.0,0.1267069270512779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway_10_4,2020/04/03,"How do you speak with someone after they've said you're obsessed with them and depend on them too much? im [22/f] here because my mental health is not okay and i dont know how cope with the problem above. my SO told me in a fight that im obsessed with him and that i depend on him too much. he said that our relationship isnt what he thinks about all the time. ive been dealing with the consequences of childhood trauma all my life and ive been dependent on people all my life. i have trouble opening up and trusting others.

 when i hear that im not ideal to someone in a relationship i immediately go to full on negative thoughts and lock up. i cant talk to the person, in this case my SO. i feel like im too much and that more talking will only be worse.

now i know that this isnt an advice sub but i guess some of you that maybe feel the same, mentally, could help me a bit. i want to feel like not an overly dependent piece of shit.",2.0585999999999984,3.3524682599999984,3.6810000000000014,90.93550000000002,76.4,6.6000000000000005,23.0,7.1686216300943375,0.6040499999999995,732,21,168,8,16,244,108,200,0.11599999999999999,0.813,0.071,-0.5888,0,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,1,2,2,1,11,12,2,2,10,1,14,4,1,6,3,40,28,13,0,4,4,0,3,2,0,1,3,4,0,1,11,13,0,0,7,0,0,1,8,7,0,0,6,7,26,5,24,19,12,18,0,0,0,0,22,12,1,6,7,116,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829329913514895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737938510560961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216043238547068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966523663103879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480213013976503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418752635964686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18362675429003708,0.17296307293892552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687982032430777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335545323357553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286755368105936,0.13643749947677158,0.0,0.08114044615103934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5230396056333865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330570477688171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710090976669814,0.11828247074709647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12161576566650015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24398942808248536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669675065116148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09206759112029138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392412035015302,0.10570033703365722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583304545089942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599349926873979,0.0,0.0,0.2303015740392636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12426095966449745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20513859102202733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945984426384989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756699482029772,0.0,0.09610394831034748,0.07058799730863467,0.0,0.0,0.11567299981640485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140122704702842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233651306512076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Loveisallweneed2323,2020/04/03,"Tension Headaches / Psychosis / Dissociative Hey everyone,

I’m 28 years old and I have been a heavy pot smoker since I was 18. I’ve been depressed a few times (let’s say 4... all ranging from a week to 2 months) in my life and it always stems from isolating myself in my room, smoking all day and binge eating and binge watching movies, but I’ve always managed to get back out of it and get back to feeling not just normal but really freakin good. I always get myself out of it by exercising, eating very clean, back to work, healthy relationships, yoga and meditation and getting a lot of sunlight. 

This time is very different. Last month i fell into it again (it lasted about 3 weeks). After the 3 weeks i snapped out of it and got back to my normal healthy routine. 2 weeks went by and I seemed to be doing really well. I didn’t stop smoking but was just smoking a lot less, until 5 days ago happened. I smoked at night and my thoughts were uncontrollable. I thought i was going crazy and I was talking to myself all night long. It went on for about 4 hours and then i finally feel asleep (thank god). This has never happened to me before so I’m in bed freaking out and just going bat shit crazy. 

I have not touched weed since and I NEVER WILL TOUCH WEED AGAIN. I have no craving for it all. I have no cravings for it bc of how intense and how painful it has been for me these past 5 days. It fluctuates a lot but i have a ton of tension headaches (which idk if this is the right term but sharp pain near my temples) I’m thinking in my head a lot of the day uncontrollably, and my symptoms seem to match being dissociative/ psychosis. It’s a bit scary for me to be honest guys. I told my dad and he said go see a psychiatrist. Fuck that. I’m sorry i don’t believe in taking anti psychotic meds for my situation or for me i should say. I refuse to believe that i need to take these types of meds bc i put myself into this weed induced state of mind. I’m not saying everyone shouldn’t take it I’m just saying I won’t and I don’t believe in them for myself. 

So, yesterday i went to the store and bought $200 worth of supplements and mood enhancers from  Nac to  ashwagandha.  I figured I’m going to try everything in the world before i going to see a psychiatrist   Since we are all being honest here I’d rather commit suicide before taking anti depressants or antipsychotics. And i have no judgements to anyone that takes these meds but i just seen what they do to people and i would never (my mom is also a  pharmaceutical rep and sells these drugs so i know a lot about the side effects and about how they switch up drugs like candy and most people feel like non human when they are on them)

I am not suicidal at all i just want to say that but it’s just been so hard for me these past 5 days guys...Like so tough and I have a couple close friends that I’ve spoken to about this. One said to micro dose shrooms and the other said it will go away in time. I want to tell and talk everyone in my life about this but i feel ill be judged or just told to “go see a psychiatrist” and i believe that’s the last option here. 

So i have hope. I think this will go away one day just with being completely sober and goal oriented and doing all the normal things that i tend to do to stay fit and happy.  It’s just so real right now and I’m so scared right now.  

I don’t feel depressed at all. I’ve felt depression in my life and this is just different.  I actually love where i am at in life so that’s why it scares me. 

Anyway i think that’s it. Thank you so much for reading and getting through all the typos and mistakes lol 

Peace and love everyone. I hope everyone is trying to stay positive through this virus thing. It hasn’t effected my family or job or anything and i have no aniexty from it but i can only imagine what’s happening for people that live paycheck to paycheck. 

Any and all comments are so appreciated 🙏🏼",2.1674827479658063,4.1278060651629085,3.534189926871978,89.19440776599032,77.94736842105263,6.427740584337556,23.08689532049301,7.410397764457081,0.8640386720225215,3072,97,649,41,73,1005,323,798,0.13,0.746,0.12300000000000001,-0.1569,3,0,4,0,0,2,67.0,1,1,5,4,47,32,2,6,25,1,54,20,3,6,14,138,122,72,2,14,31,2,10,2,1,7,12,9,3,2,50,48,2,2,19,3,4,13,18,17,1,2,24,24,79,14,92,84,22,98,0,4,5,3,32,36,2,17,48,429,129,6,0.0,0.0,0.048913106448902816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044431277569498384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04008358164091642,0.1251197925054301,0.0,0.0,0.0340855600289856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03504737393433886,0.0,0.041247201763385984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941849729561304,0.15416688255480565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795369922695352,0.2258871609314634,0.0,0.0,0.05472165732855404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052553322140101104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055460473578946685,0.0,0.1939522756427848,0.0,0.17268448532985026,0.0,0.0,0.10473635208051696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11625422035582275,0.10257729004842182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23947478620745954,0.04504758640719756,0.0,0.04725178253750675,0.0,0.12671922227708407,0.03580809262280423,0.04812622446893814,0.05490762067676507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03872513409422815,0.04633817940517794,0.1309367667862142,0.0,0.2278897933207306,0.04204104253690268,0.04008817860018748,0.0,0.0,0.04962994333755187,0.1329715951510786,0.05335718054938837,0.044900627928729335,0.0,0.05144096218865996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956748498312068,0.04936134991548671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04973963705256268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027546452602082726,0.12257152813435054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05125446603890175,0.1416142649307277,0.04897542112542989,0.0,0.0442597886017368,0.0443575396040945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130651688403657,0.09047646303004277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670270468481362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0506102403371578,0.058703798393360006,0.08001587320388504,0.0,0.036846389764064666,0.037165788817244486,0.11597452745797532,0.0,0.0,0.09407463555790227,0.14733056346469545,0.0,0.0,0.05259596742571858,0.0,0.06792968503761679,0.03812102519198388,0.10666944163530084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569671505612597,0.10424754684533594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05038775655027297,0.0,0.0,0.050136859999150934,0.05705128414684536,0.0642205336977838,0.0,0.0,0.05381366170191094,0.0,0.1284150625487115,0.14303619762735442,0.1993002836004851,0.10036432659804423,0.0,0.1198253320979145,0.09126073221869424,0.0,0.0,0.05145084297428077,0.12438752504312085,0.056340684701706424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056108926131597806,0.0,0.10684952867528104,0.0,0.04190531976460636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965350080020857,0.0,0.0,0.05209729633167795,0.18843240306636605,0.08057441325309182,0.04380996991077192,0.09229359321820764,0.0,0.0,0.06659938121351862,0.09635095241324353,0.0,0.07958459627343137,0.08768189080145566,0.0,0.0,0.0957899144829838,0.0,0.06806085550490218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271393694606194,0.059128037170909226,0.0,0.160823538396681,0.0,0.045066862601007965,0.13939439245449034,0.045228478390934315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03649035639782803,0.0,0.0,0.035606151316386794,0.0,0.0,0.03227775921787783
mentalhealth,Ok-Peak,2020/04/03,"Have had mental issues - not sure whether to raise with doctor after lockdown. Put this in another subreddit but want as many opinions as possible 

Every since I was a young child - I have always had troubles with controlling my emotions. I have constantly been up and down all my life and sometimes lashed out (violently). As I headed into my teenage years, the ups and downs got worse. For periods of time, I could be feeling great, feel like I’m active and then I would be really depressed, just my cut self off from everyone and blow up for no good reason. At the age of 15, I was in hospital after attempting to commit suicide, for diagnosed with early depression and I had to do counselling. I got a little bit better in terms of controlling my suicidal thoughts, but the emotional rollercoaster did not stop. Now (18F), I am starting to realise that my emotional moods are not normal and I didn’t just have an “anger issue” as my dad would say. Even now I am struggling and am in a depressive slump - making it hard for me to want to do any uni work at all. I had been in a good headspace about two weeks ago so I am very confused.

Another example of my unpredictable moods. I decided to cut 4 of my closest friends out of my life because I was really paranoid that they didn’t need me anymore. A few weeks later, I back tracked and apologised.

Wondering if I should go see my doctor and bring this all up? Should I also say something to my parents about all of this? Does anyone know what may be wrong?",4.7370377668308725,6.103231882758621,5.420541871921184,80.7962643678161,69.82758620689657,9.110016420361248,30.706075533661746,9.48565724429506,2.8457454844006578,1186,49,223,26,21,384,169,290,0.193,0.68,0.127,-0.9825,1,1,1,0,0,2,32.0,0,0,1,5,10,20,4,2,9,0,32,6,1,4,6,54,48,21,2,10,9,2,3,1,1,5,5,2,0,2,7,16,0,3,7,0,0,3,6,11,0,1,15,6,34,7,48,24,7,42,0,3,1,0,8,19,0,5,21,163,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883085661873458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966738333882009,0.08289317857620995,0.0,0.0,0.06774612611902002,0.20892393522305527,0.0,0.0,0.09879789008666577,0.06965776160570937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660288594387543,0.0,0.0607284223808945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810723808205409,0.10876102066885553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765559325711878,0.2234682631937508,0.07953976708639726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574118977069567,0.10111385974126404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039339239289972,0.0871795617430686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3361827828161568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0657991485643133,0.0,0.08393552183830598,0.09519273883098776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10074338114776113,0.07116971400332425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696742597430101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566172694038727,0.1671157972735738,0.15935303988085445,0.10983320127955708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924141483655174,0.0,0.1022405355567928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079582031670516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054749443768134017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407314100764521,0.04867009744704249,0.09984704708241267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664982131188885,0.1010006988944004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039517407624178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386817803154168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760804795518356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061803321717904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230842196589688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001472561168554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12764033718739268,0.10242762993916306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15844624101083593,0.0,0.0,0.07938554286776825,0.0,0.10392708913456612,0.0,0.0,0.08240804368025723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669359959866691,0.09852834163951442,0.0,0.0705127040746866,0.0,0.0,0.08328814534414948,0.0,0.10414616023023203,0.0,0.21793979292949495,0.0,0.09389220944654816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908844818284225,0.058090174916085875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731585914433297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219827984905409,0.11751883964776187,0.0,0.15982092865517833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080354106290134,0.07252573478484863,0.0,0.1015229542034028,0.1415366985692233,0.10892061602798207,0.0,0.06415306496223612
mentalhealth,jabjoe123,2020/04/03,"Issue with uncontrollable Hatred Hello people of reddit,

I'm a 20 years young man from Germany (Sorry for my bad English) and have serious issues with extreme and uncontrollable Hatred during phases of depression. This is realized in the urge to destroy and kill everything that even mildly annoys me, including myself. Currently, my moral conscience and self-control restrict me from doing such things but the urges are there and are getting worse.

It usually starts with a depression after being (continiously) let down or disappointed by friends and/or family or even myself. I start to focus on negative things and memories, including previous instances of being let down and/or disappointed, which worsens each following instance of depression.

During the first severe depressions (16-18 years old) I only developed the urge to kill myself, but later, I started to see all the bad things in other people and things and began to switch from depression to extreme hatred for everything including myself and loved ones. I was often used (financially and through ""favors"") or treated like trash by so-called ""friends"" and colleagues during my age of 16 to 19 years.

I have loving and nice parents, a happy nice little dog, no kids or girlfriend and a dozen really nice friends, but sometimes I feel extremely misunderstood and left behind or treated like the ""last choice"" or excluded. I informed friends and family about this issue and my phases of Hatred and that I'm sorry and they seem to understand and apparently forget or forgive everything that I do in my hateful actions and messages.

Yet still, I have the feeling that I grow more and more distant to everything and everyone. That I'm treated more and more excluded and sometimes unfortunatly, that really is the case. In my worst bouts of hatred, I even fantasize about how to destroy all life on earth in the most brutal fassion possible, It's just sheer unbearably painful Hatred and when I'm not raging, I'm considered to be the total opposite, being open-minded, nice and peaceful and usually I am even sorry for squashing a bug/spider.

I try to exclude my family from these issues as they have enough to worry about, but my closest friends start to suffer from by bouts of Hatred and me lashing out verbally.

I tried getting professional therapy but in Germany, as long as you have only state-supported health insurance, you are treated like a machine that requires fixing and not as a human with serious and painful issues. In short, I'm too poor (being an apprentice living on minimal social welfare) to be able to afford professional help from a specialist and take every sound advice that I can get.

TLDR: I'm angry without reason, need help. I'm thankful for anything.",12.926453947368422,10.148845570833334,11.81513157894737,55.35039473684212,54.75,14.771929824561406,46.721491228070185,12.936686537176746,6.2573333333333325,2214,103,313,56,19,714,239,480,0.27699999999999997,0.593,0.129,-0.9984,5,0,0,0,0,1,64.0,0,2,2,2,16,47,8,2,19,0,23,6,0,3,3,72,52,49,2,1,16,1,2,3,6,0,4,1,0,3,19,37,0,2,8,0,1,3,5,25,0,3,2,4,34,22,65,42,11,42,1,8,1,2,23,17,0,10,25,234,53,4,0.07093362006585159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06931551257348258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05837232537806965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845321971139308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955808651199232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3054751151133315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07329339127988571,0.0,0.18740394825036488,0.0,0.0597646342474273,0.06778011376642769,0.25500225555584793,0.0,0.20060971220269605,0.0,0.07173233924420935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033610099155675,0.0,0.0,0.2740156945221224,0.0,0.11117966642161713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551015756540452,0.0,0.07003226438230711,0.0,0.07539912112438599,0.0,0.0,0.09509062062720312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701813510784344,0.0,0.0,0.1569550818254114,0.0,0.0,0.05782036773782344,0.0,0.0,0.07706958575051892,0.14506886483425746,0.05010251360887719,0.10396375130588616,0.0710941222366085,0.06263568608231028,0.06277402160742995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12804072308572045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162273536444541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05259638048219268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744329019398762,0.0,0.048066456733137336,0.10789642890283692,0.15095674588427288,0.0,0.07876339065515121,0.0,0.0,0.09835288155592573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996699865198602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088378674666707,0.0729315754054346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05652491138573454,0.06457530362749632,0.07399923577638981,0.08013480022218768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230789277572347,0.0,0.0,0.14031032802619164,0.2382131407281317,0.2008287255037944,0.0,0.0566476806132815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049463144930011,0.0,0.0,0.053333254491582084,0.0,0.0,0.06530614712422332,0.08111877647158866,0.0,0.18850058108060508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631854363920857,0.0,0.0,0.07384440009702244,0.0,0.061263872868130724,0.1562467221523531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837747847134595,0.0,0.0,0.07203653437672851,0.07228741887580238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13703677701696415
mentalhealth,Pomadegrenade,2020/04/03,"I have no fucking clue what to do with my aging bipolar dad I dont even know where to start with my father. He is brilliant. Not like ""I love my dad, he's so smart."" He's easily well into the genius range. He's also bipolar and religion is the only thing he's ever had going on in his life. And he wants to make sure I know all about ""our faith,"" and ""what we believe."" Which i refuse to participate in. is some sort of new Hebrew-speaking sect of fundamentalist Episcopalianism/Anglicanism (I think... I'm pretty sure its just something his former parishioners made up... I'm Catholic btw, so there is no ""we"" in the statement for me). Aside from some things hes memorized though, he doesn't speak Hebrew or Greek. I keep getting these books in the mail about Jesus. But they aren't readable. They're like doctorate level and beyond books on Jesus. Because I'm in the military and have an interest in international affairs and politics, he sends me photocopied sensationalist pieces on China and asks for my thoughts on them. He has yet to read any of the actual credible books on China I've sent him.

​

He's sending my sister books about how to deal with her abortion (which she's never had, but he's decided that statistically speaking she probably had one and is just dishonoring him by covering it up). Recently he sent her some essay he found on the internet about how Yoga and martial arts open you up to possession by demons. He is very much into demons. Not like old demonology texts, but the modern ones where missionaries go to Africa and decide that the reason a kid has a deformed leg is because of demons, and then they pray over him until the leg heals itself. Stuff that somehow in 2020, nobody takes a fucking video of. Anyway, unnamed friends of his (I think he says it this way because he knows I don't believe him) know all about demons and ""spiritual warfare"" and they go to the airport to pray for returning soldiers they find who are demon possessed or infested (I guess there's a difference). Also apparently Hillary Clinton smells like sulfur.

So what. I guess I just have no clue how to deal with this. He's lost his shit and won't go get meds because ""all"" the doctors out there are ""anti-Christian perverts."" He saw one a while back who diagnosed him with ADD after praying together. Seeing as he's pretty bipolar, it makes me question their competence. So I dont know what to do. I dont want him just languishing there, I also don't like the effect its having on me and my sister. My brother doesn't give a fuck and noped out of our family years ago, which I cant totally fault him for. My sister went from being an Episcopalian to totally walking away from religion. Every interaction with my dad on something religious and I feel myself drifting further and further away from the Church as well. All in all, it leaves me really concerned with my future mental health.",4.931260015849254,6.484138104693142,5.5905864224707225,79.04755877432422,69.57761732851985,8.509571189574713,29.21616624108479,8.979522561349006,2.443878013559919,2306,87,420,43,41,747,271,554,0.06,0.867,0.073,0.8607,1,0,2,0,0,0,81.0,4,1,6,3,35,20,4,0,22,0,32,16,3,8,11,90,73,39,0,2,11,8,1,5,1,1,9,4,0,1,25,33,0,2,18,8,0,11,17,6,2,3,11,8,60,14,73,60,12,64,13,1,2,4,75,33,4,10,24,287,85,7,0.0,0.0,0.08212240899678852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459766540536354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20189437092961451,0.0,0.09118109515240178,0.10225662538139392,0.05722777604626522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867286413806532,0.0,0.15813137688433002,0.06470942402805416,0.0,0.20519859981668295,0.0,0.0,0.18962604467287045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735186739295649,0.0,0.0854147927260145,0.0,0.08792328035199644,0.0,0.1722708824168198,0.0,0.0,0.2958844641725727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05558308871355914,0.07612233741129508,0.07090358550760573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933313774348268,0.0,0.0425509175560739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691546028557217,0.0,0.0,0.09227079192060336,0.06501736510773216,0.2333977453622113,0.08793424499396763,0.08072842520496465,0.19130719935799986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18541078890602425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945203294825411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480016441244852,0.0,0.0,0.23124487598861454,0.0,0.0,0.08910720026228296,0.0,0.0,0.059440635796510814,0.20556757975769127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186430533015312,0.0,0.07595249659002852,0.07962878649599085,0.11234723122496428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347640098002184,0.0,0.08480769111531432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06186305695837635,0.0,0.06490494585578685,0.08127669943756644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830572952933997,0.0,0.1710752940066228,0.06400309956725721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17123025331802105,0.09073251531111833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09427202005635524,0.0,0.084177023738335,0.0,0.05391136770091343,0.0865245852849209,0.08309216982857097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692283762476964,0.0,0.0,0.0670600420836808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638312870963047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957210672986996,0.0,0.0,0.05956481157480995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633648298345282,0.0,0.0,0.15862877016040994,0.0,0.06327352317738932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181668922752078,0.10784529131711527,0.08268112374650377,0.06680907469901276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943606992856863,0.09927271449829664,0.06679772691199032,0.0,0.0,0.15132955526299702,0.0780118332289599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225662538139392,0.05419257815406822
mentalhealth,shayworld,2020/04/03,"I (18M) don’t know what I want. I don’t know what to do. I just feel helpless I’ve had feelings like these on and off. I usually push the feelings down and out of the way to focus on things and it usually works, I usually had college to distract me. But since lockdown began and I couldn’t go to college or a friends place I’ve have a lot less distractions and I don’t know how to handle this anymore.

I’ve felt like this for about half a month, I’ve felt worthless and like a failure. When I have nothing to do the word failure just keeps itself in the back of my mind.

I haven’t felt like myself, but I don’t even know who I am, I put on a face and smile because I don’t want people to worry, but I end up annoying them so I stay alone in my room, but that’s not helping.

I am behind on college work, making excuses so I can have more time but I never end up doing it because I can’t stop thinking about how wrong everything will be and how much I’ll fail.

I don’t know what to do, I can’t tell my family because they always call me an stupid or over dramatic when I always try and open up, and the only friends I can contact will say either “oOf” or make it about themselves, saying that their life is so much worse.

I try and help people and even in this state I still try because it distracts me from my own issues, but it’s getting harder and harder to the point I just don’t want to talk about anything with a flaw.

I don’t know what to do, I don’t know what to think, I don’t know who I am. All I know is that I’ll end up being a failure. What’s the point in trying anymore? Why am I even doing this?",3.6265466073114783,3.2267347195467444,5.005374342371511,89.11610953729935,71.4929178470255,7.743639552138138,27.00782409280993,6.868970318607317,1.0188951571563467,1248,36,295,9,21,420,151,353,0.155,0.773,0.071,-0.9854,0,2,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,3,3,21,15,2,3,15,0,37,2,1,5,2,63,63,30,0,4,14,0,6,4,2,2,1,2,1,0,23,16,0,2,17,0,0,3,16,9,0,1,6,8,44,6,38,52,8,42,0,3,0,0,16,21,0,4,19,206,67,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116826786485867,0.0,0.0,0.1464891729975965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17459604591464847,0.0,0.0,0.07243780165141964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768647073191164,0.0,0.2146390456929372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988426871675452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338944153698017,0.0,0.0,0.1744207971516711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911198795396521,0.0,0.08298296865719185,0.0,0.1335255944107862,0.06288570860651338,0.25355595676363235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601715813519227,0.0,0.04598989088155477,0.0,0.05002713802758995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180037881186004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918761523060671,0.0,0.0782414496078713,0.0,0.0,0.4353905103945864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062175284598151775,0.17202000085386684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748364581327064,0.0,0.0,0.1175159212485502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08888104875827009,0.0,0.0702614202213988,0.0,0.12941830520340789,0.0,0.06789098781221423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446320908222638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694765083572096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220521279536066,0.0,0.09196831267759356,0.0,0.16642582436665354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849032561255295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400034309754204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281592028692742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382387936432356,0.07029758409829437,0.07359357996358501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075187062250612,0.07693850188810109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05848048546573838,0.1128068633580436,0.0,0.0,0.05132860042831898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23905518631648956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908442227027203,0.0,0.15575983989874262,0.06987084888325529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942966811354116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816778282796612,0.08939455735298812,0.08970589532802373,0.0,0.09624248483642464,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LastBother,2020/04/03,"Quarantine is killing me I have a very rocky relationship with my parents that reached a turning point when I was in my last year of high school. I think I haven’t forgiven them and vice versa.  
It’s been two years but I moved hours away for school and only come back at Christmas and summer. 

Now I’ve been quarantined w them and my siblings for about 3 weeks and I’m falling quickly into something and it’s scaring me. 

I’m always ready to snap.  I’ve been in a mad/sad mood for about a week now. I make a snide comment almost any time someone talks to me and I feel bad but my emotions are always so strong and I’m losing control over them. 

I don’t want to destroy my relationship w my family but I also don’t know how to handle quarantine.  I feel like I’m in prison and I’m always on edge. 

On the other hand, my siblings are telling me to get over it and get a hold on my emotions and I understand that they are right but I literally cannot control my emotions. I see red when I talk to my parents sometimes. 

I don’t know how to handle months of this and be okay. 

I feel like I can’t even fully explain it to my friends bc I don’t want them to see me this way. But I literally feel like I’m falling apart and if it continues I’m going to destroy my relationship with my family. 

Literally any advice will help. If you are in similar situations please let me know how you are handeling it.",1.2992430325932922,3.3504474623287703,3.3293623051487984,89.12664383561645,81.22602739726028,6.3563533301842225,24.11006140765234,7.503015589744147,1.1021269248937182,1097,41,237,17,29,371,139,292,0.109,0.7490000000000001,0.142,0.7658,2,3,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,2,5,4,14,13,3,1,7,1,21,1,1,6,0,44,48,27,1,4,7,2,5,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,11,17,0,3,10,0,0,5,7,6,0,1,4,8,45,6,31,41,0,38,0,1,3,0,19,16,0,3,19,148,56,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644643133581693,0.0,0.0,0.09883167535765908,0.0,0.0,0.07892866330345646,0.24637364155050204,0.0,0.0,0.13423589314640147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272991227798884,0.0758925816230626,0.08240861170354986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501948897230599,0.0,0.0,0.22139614187671114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33306551014065794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518902247108388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18608716495454106,0.0,0.19961846561085225,0.21152936717206605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07625374143673094,0.0,0.10313114304299502,0.0,0.05609228277191135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615511212788963,0.10427973482512497,0.0,0.0,0.09719753595338833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919458689737216,0.0,0.1627253299451936,0.08045194964007306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092527481759313,0.0,0.1446564041650471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041768783194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588160491251771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877971050115365,0.10490023252021448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506418935101647,0.0,0.0,0.2191846432801039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834063976096032,0.09330140368787862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178937768320992,0.0,0.08428745486367521,0.0,0.0,0.09881380128028476,0.19977505852618085,0.15729887242622695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094055847963187,0.0,0.0,0.08362639802077103,0.07598245413068108,0.09761473236844406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15865924336549495,0.08626630213334448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06324161972449914,0.0,0.0,0.057551530689680365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735495751433896,0.09641349268147573,0.10274797947922383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143609194163058,0.11642913997717932,0.07834178742968659,0.15833898062174176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271164045329394
mentalhealth,somethingminty,2020/04/03,"Constant breakdowns for years because I have no friends or family, no one cares. Hello.

I just... have no one. I'm completely alone. I'm financially supported by a parent, but that person doesn't support me emotionally. I don't have a job. I tried to get a job, I had a breakdown after 2 months. I doubt I'll ever be able to get another job, because they'll know I only lasted 2 months before, and they won't hire me because of that.

I can't make friends. Just... everyone I know is always rude to me. If I scroll down my ""friends"" lists on any app, or contacts lists, or anything, I think about trying to reach out to those people but every time I do, they're just rude.

They don't even think they're being rude.

I just... have nothing in common with anyone. Every time I meet people, I try to look for common ground, but I can't find any. So I listen to them talk about the things they care about, and I smile and nod and try to be polite, but when I try to talk about anything I care about, they kick me down. 

Yeah, there are topics I like, but when I try to find people online who like the same topics, they just kick me down. They ignore me, because I'm different from them... 

Anyway, I've been having constant breakdowns for years, and begging for help everywhere I can find to go, but no one has ever cared. No one has ever even tried to help.

I did find a good therapist, but they couldn't do anything for me. They couldn't tell me where to find friends. They just told me my ideas are valid and I'm smart, but I can figure that out for myself. I don't need to pay someone to tell me that. 

I just feel so sick. I can barely move, I can barely get out of bed most days. Trying to do anything, just... I collapse. I vomit. I can't do anything.

​

And no one will help me. No one cares at all.

​

And don't tell me just to cope without having anyone who cares about me. Humans need friendship the same as air. Telling me to cope with complete social isolation is the same as telling me to cope without air and water.",1.8377311350665801,3.7200865518072312,3.0282466708941023,92.80314362714016,78.66265060240964,5.428662016487,21.04153455928979,6.202715092499727,0.11324096385542105,1569,42,338,11,38,505,167,415,0.12,0.7190000000000001,0.162,0.9618,5,4,0,0,0,0,82.0,0,0,12,0,27,21,3,1,9,1,39,3,0,1,4,64,66,27,0,5,23,1,1,2,4,3,2,1,1,2,8,14,1,1,12,0,1,2,20,5,0,6,4,3,62,16,51,54,5,33,0,0,1,0,37,13,0,6,20,228,70,5,0.061718565514909965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06392182052797467,0.0,0.0,0.05135479067960415,0.13374407989932127,0.1499896250685016,0.08394148193986188,0.06471729728324373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631011207230102,0.0,0.2539456032808906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15049225874749986,0.0,0.05251795346604373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775571452153103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12942148339507056,0.1333916867990543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039803368907584416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448276483602912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942507911246243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08152906088188723,0.167483927888387,0.10400110669243033,0.05897473424051582,0.0,0.0,0.0581827707557904,0.0,0.03120676115973957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.282048253772692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19073444246919252,0.0,0.0967362094250678,0.0,0.035076083087023764,0.05176660453639911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12410596047935595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696727480567192,0.0,0.0,0.18373845882798148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783781905412932,0.05030886836185891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06030514717084656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05182805081459742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04119762173371789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852634032907928,0.0655970677230075,0.0,0.0915270685924034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922062817047296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509325836915982,0.04693975021916584,0.0,0.0,0.06853116310451253,0.0,0.0,0.1283636467077448,0.05389027081157124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629143051402222,0.052293940276467964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007499349645713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992140902063486,0.2697237330796173,0.0,0.0,0.07166001152083194,0.04100307249306271,0.0790935293910095,0.0,0.0,0.07197718375860065,0.0,0.0,0.05897473424051582,0.0,0.3352228373726573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898898944845347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499896250685016,0.07948946533789243
mentalhealth,Dadcanpreach,2020/04/03,"[help] My dad needs some answers about the coronovirus, it's giving him nightmares! =[ Hey all!

Isolation is a difficult thing, and i'm sure we all have someone stubborn in the family you really worry about, who is just so easy going about everything, even though you know they have had some really bad cards dealt to them. 

I don't live with my dad (live in another city)He called me today asking if i could ask the internet/world/somebody important because he's been having recurring dreams 3 nights in a row referring to the ""Cure"" for corona and prevention methods for PPE (Technophobe born in the 50's, stuck in his ways) he said this could save lives and so on!

now i know this is common stress related/anxiety/being at home alone and a lot to think/worry about, and i'm going to keep supporting him through this difficult time, keep his mind busy from thinking about it.

But he was insistent that i write this down! ""sulfur powder + Copper powder mixed together to a boiling water vapour"" now i'm sure there are plenty of people out there that knows the effects sulfur and copper can do to the respiratory system, but i'm asking people to just take a few moments to explain/theorise what effect this chemical compound could do to the body and A virus.

So when i call him later i can say that I got the word out and everybody shared their thoughts. I just want to put his mind at ease and let him have a restful sleep.

He's said 3 nights in a row it's exactly the same, and it's my cousin who passed who is telling him this over and over again.

Sorry for sharing such random info! I just wanted to help my dear ol dad!.

​

take care everyone",4.761055900621116,6.0434726211180125,5.224658385093171,82.53990683229816,69.6832298136646,8.581366459627331,27.354037267080745,8.964715089967882,2.09107950310559,1312,43,251,24,23,419,185,322,0.057,0.812,0.131,0.9771,0,2,1,0,0,0,45.0,1,2,3,2,21,13,1,1,18,0,21,4,2,2,5,57,49,19,0,7,7,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,18,15,2,4,10,1,0,4,1,5,0,0,8,3,28,8,37,37,8,33,0,0,0,0,41,14,0,5,13,160,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858705537994576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135987342883305,0.12739727677658125,0.0,0.10993836981004804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29404574843012066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754059500002682,0.06391210035904801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645836035869582,0.0,0.0,0.21411546568812895,0.0,0.10689573163477846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25112888054344257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924865856395658,0.0,0.0,0.10018320317065882,0.09422727905622624,0.0,0.09883785690134944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057618752051783,0.11917084166948425,0.0,0.08385354894867711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405498226035394,0.0,0.10516736197904868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18638082790321367,0.0,0.0,0.17285902420273758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107210380389077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777382619690645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891348581475847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117256714375308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774070563007403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967785101003972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537164616294151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539746024486582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433186176016731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994618400069013,0.08337638011970118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10491999794256623,0.0,0.08883421876808552,0.0,0.0,0.11736458846777445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200987692606914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897604722857275,0.19762898747616545,0.0,0.15765970204461707,0.0,0.0916385224929078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965388136283739,0.1343599632369394,0.10300897342196763,0.08323464762182628,0.06113554318643982,0.0,0.09938011894282912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367974630623027,0.08322050988592207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129489125392567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739727677658125,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwwwayyyyyyyyytt,2020/04/03,"What is wrong with me..? Let me start off by saying that I don't know of this is where I should post. I feel terrible and I just need a place to vent.

I had a dream last night that i was madly in love with someone. I woke up today feeling genuine loss for that ""person"". I feel like I've lost them, I'm genuinely so sad and emotional about it. The kicker is that I'm in relationship. I don't understand why this is hurting me so badly. I have no idea why I feel this. I am not unhappy in my relationship  but now I just feel insane because i feel like I have a connection to someone that isn't real.. I think there's something wrong with me...",1.3796813725490191,2.9894819191176474,3.4932352941176497,90.20372549019608,79.07352941176471,6.886274509803924,22.362745098039216,7.793537801064563,0.8716980392156866,495,15,113,8,12,169,81,136,0.193,0.7040000000000001,0.10300000000000001,-0.8951,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,8,12,1,0,4,0,14,1,0,0,0,22,30,5,0,2,4,0,6,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,10,5,0,0,10,1,0,0,5,9,0,0,4,7,22,3,14,24,0,13,0,4,0,1,6,7,0,0,7,76,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296130014213287,0.0897722360118824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16565488853973692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4467739273205843,0.2104143039426176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15765173660561652,0.16624585036333311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093376700361134,0.12004177867113187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15058988074469332,0.0,0.14389385738799618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607586817168067,0.0,0.1329136837320151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919617622244628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381995486892067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285873479554244,0.1538620532839836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14104051156828054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16762141409266246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31621802057113696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171121592292124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24955670079306885,0.1133728763870932,0.0,0.0,0.10423592222313792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09436236849120218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139591336265036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330952533445386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657700564858202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220253998134441,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheWolfLingers,2020/04/03,"I think I need help I'm not sure where to go with this. I've tried talking to my boyfriend. He just keeps telling me everything will get better, but I'm getting worse. 
A bit of back story, I've always struggled with my mental health. The first time I was baker acted was at around 5 or 6. I really don't even remember it, my mother said it was because I was trying to kill myself. I struggle with severe depression, and bipolar personality disorder. Those where my last diagnoses at 17. I haven't been able to get any kind of help since then. I've been on and off different medications my whole life basically up until I hit 18.
My mental stability is starting to break, and now with this quarantine I'm starting to hit a low point I haven't been at in a very long time. I've tried to maintain my grounding techniques, and outlets like drawing, writing, taking my dog for walks. But I can't bring myself to do them, I can't concentrate long enough to ground myself, I hate everything I write, and draw. I'm having a hard time telling the difference between my internal dialogue and what my illness tells me. I can't keep my thoughts together, my brain is in constant chaos always screaming these awful things at me, there is nothing positive in my head right now. I keep reliving things, and thinking about things I've suppressed, and haven't thought about in a long time. I'm snapping, and getting irrationally angry over minor inconveniences, and things I should be understanding and used to. Like my daughter not being able to fall asleep, my boyfriend correcting my stutter, or just talking too much, my dog or cats trying to get in bed to sleep with us. I can't control myself, and my anger. I'm concerned for where my head is at, I don't want to hurt the people around me, nothing physical. But being screamed at isn't pleasant, and I'm just losing my mind constantly. I broke down in frustration over a pen yesterday. A fucking pen. It's ridiculous, and besides there being a pandemic going on, I can't even afford to go seek help. I'm just at breaking point after screaming at my daughter for waking me up, I feel like such an awful, disgusting excuse of a mother. Person. My daughter was the best thing to happen to me, and she makes me so unbelievably happy. I don't understand why I'm like this, and why I can't just stop, and be fucking normal. I'm exhausted, and drained of everything that made me happy, I feel like a hollow shell, with nothing to give but frustration. I don't feel sympathy or remorse until hours after. I feel so disgusted with myself and I just want it all to go away.",5.204891885607999,6.172091735177865,5.885263892118116,79.37526156707743,68.40711462450592,8.87784236224134,31.483143455010467,9.088552180705676,2.686866961171821,2062,84,386,37,34,672,231,506,0.233,0.675,0.091,-0.9979,2,1,0,0,0,1,65.0,1,0,1,5,24,34,10,2,15,2,35,15,6,4,3,75,85,32,1,5,16,5,5,5,0,2,7,4,1,2,16,28,0,6,11,0,0,8,16,22,0,1,12,9,65,12,65,64,6,68,0,5,0,2,24,34,2,4,29,252,81,2,0.14214323426630285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11827455776664884,0.0,0.0,0.04833113680014142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12653761461270224,0.0,0.0,0.06677412383116753,0.05464968658628048,0.0,0.04332459814146845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458527741091532,0.06285706978056776,0.07759179852194775,0.0,0.0,0.07933942951559632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15360633893277012,0.07971286195709791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06121387969452258,0.07213619534436097,0.0,0.14850942616306162,0.08145423059073817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343597913934775,0.0,0.09388426564812287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19162376026484645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14374378034271765,0.1015471549614079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060453481226506164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314091296136349,0.1856599328962548,0.06817837127004278,0.16156655145131804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06284839631322575,0.1513141160191805,0.06366620906302448,0.07016850791664461,0.14587996668130535,0.07554580555389193,0.0,0.0,0.14291342051687794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06999122658909812,0.0,0.07608363607918721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18951515655449191,0.07863021422170646,0.07401015244907097,0.0,0.05793285376589601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05019998501856918,0.17361001082605154,0.0,0.0,0.1886884340084276,0.0,0.07951096015639486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724968257119875,0.04744085631653014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715971771483058,0.14324694769493465,0.0,0.07176207306387637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05224581619794317,0.05269870355904102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06963509485736158,0.2045854003541182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049272110568977366,0.12411398944120207,0.0,0.0,0.13437130113526466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04553029782826268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051028762810916,0.06069477270299279,0.06760538313018752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029069762893294,0.0,0.058791176126369415,0.0,0.07112294420506958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060971282090084,0.0,0.0,0.059419054299667165,0.0,0.14859897106009176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669841580499554,0.0,0.05343701111224463,0.11424934741323665,0.1863591779481123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360841219491568,0.09107964502560403,0.0,0.11284585045410232,0.16576972597258247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930118510797419,0.0,0.0,0.14797611982161907,0.08549040459377122,0.06138305802714818,0.0,0.05864152735672923,0.08383976237447514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826215995956108,0.07934892241539249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07242804967680018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deathgrippings,2020/04/03,"Don't know if I'm psychotic or not. Hi, I am 16, and wont disclose my country because of the subreddit rules.

I have had this growing feeling over the last 6 months that everything I do is being tracked, monitored, and all my life is is just a simulation run by the government to understand the mind of someone like me.

I am very narcissistic evident by this entire post, and often think of my existence as some sort of legacy, and my thinking as unique and extremely individual, but I am also sure everyone does. This sometimes makes me wonder if my individual way of thinking is being put in a simulation to test it and examine it by scientists working for a government that is examining people like me through a ""Brain in a vat"" type method.

The fact that I live in a fairly wealthy family and have no obvious issues or diseases, as well as being mentally (supposedly) sound, is very concerning and makes everything feel more like a simulation to test my, the subject's, way of thinking in a somewhat controlled environment. The bare fact that the Sun and Moon just somehow happened to allign and look the same size from their distances from Earth seems fake and fabricated in this simulation world, once someone pointed the significance of this out to me, i panicked and realised it is scarily fake and impossible.

 And I feel like even just writing this feeling on reddit is serving myself to the government who is trying to examine me. But i don't care anymore and I am tired of living like this. Fuck you you simulating pigs and death to your colleagues, families and friends.

I want to die, and I hope you or your scientists will just pull the plug on me. I live in a seemingly perfect world yet hate my existence as I have no valid reason to be sad or distressed, as well as being crippingly narcisstic EVIDENT BY THE POST NOW THAT I READ IT AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH.

I want to love and I want to feel loved but I also fear that everything is simulated and will end and my rememberance as a human is synthetic and even if it is real is wrong.

I don't know, sorry for posting this in the first place, I am young and narcissistic and have very stupid self-absorbed young person opinions, but I really want to know if I am just stupid or psychotic or if this whole thing is real or fake, and if fake, well done scientists, clap clap clap.",10.064565372707786,7.723820307692312,10.168151940938321,63.59619790426292,59.72398190045249,13.920647773279354,42.493927125506076,12.488612386084178,5.263129411764706,1864,85,335,51,19,625,204,442,0.16,0.7070000000000001,0.133,-0.9798,0,0,1,0,0,1,41.0,0,5,1,4,16,27,4,2,24,0,38,6,1,4,6,94,69,52,2,11,23,0,5,5,1,3,2,1,0,2,22,26,0,1,20,1,0,4,7,12,3,1,2,7,43,15,49,59,6,32,0,1,1,3,14,15,1,23,13,244,65,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879434137118507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606149410683407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05289970018859804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687411342639166,0.0,0.0,0.08847701958084803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733007759094377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09006294774320266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594092680123023,0.08880509175789432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686047620959995,0.0,0.0,0.11463348116918183,0.0,0.0,0.08292109603484474,0.2339742294647995,0.0,0.16361512039166598,0.09765055128593904,0.2193904620671839,0.12398993373055466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381421108158544,0.0,0.0,0.06704527466219129,0.0802258284763203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767384226265127,0.0,0.0,0.08567634070952647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08619117188688957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057477675196073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307448047940566,0.07073650366655009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061294605625265584,0.2119792892815533,0.0,0.2298824589792382,0.0,0.07287254167808617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664295182432778,0.0,0.11585137236080735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745286639763149,0.0,0.08762209721127857,0.0,0.06926620555058495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241685043242072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0601616630868076,0.07577211459886697,0.09066563172212293,0.0,0.08203424669741666,0.0,0.2493310106062519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723690844567529,0.0,0.0,0.08680252833117802,0.197547102414092,0.055592878132372604,0.08922331097003848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15800076618422867,0.09052946941730307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14705520591312485,0.0,0.08582669413210106,0.09714203582459037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178822263181425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05765214130604983,0.22241803141050825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09973974615712566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05891727501790633,0.0,0.0,0.09034004594889923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21480540031621648,0.2047381157009718,0.13776233288456774,0.0,0.0,0.2340743487598275,0.0,0.0,0.0968857043372063,0.0,0.0,0.09410817221928806,0.06317617806721224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487926256504196,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nobody1831,2020/04/03,It's always hitting first The very 5 seconds i wake up in the morning those feelings fill me up before i even get out of bed,2.59,3.566999296296298,4.097222222222225,89.73250000000004,74.55555555555556,5.4,28.314814814814817,3.1291,0.7603481481481484,99,4,21,0,2,33,24,27,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,5,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4276578655495641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.437344122818898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394672989179936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598748177468404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43717613042994496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685241259650742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4240727827775798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kamicami,2020/04/03,"Am I “normal”? I’ve been meaning to seek therapy. I’m almost positive I’m suffering from depression, anxiety, and maybe depression or even a personality disorder. I’m a college student, in my 20s, on birth control, and have been dealing with trauma related to abusive relationships. An underlying issue could be the fact I have an absent father. There are a lot of things that could have made me the way I am today, and I’m trying to cope. I feel like I don’t know who I am anymore. I struggle to maintain hobbies, to be alone, to feel light, to enjoy the world around me. One moment I feel like everything is okay, and the next moment I’m not. I’ll be ready to go out with friends, then immediately lose the energy after confirming plans. I don’t deal with stress very well. There are many things I can do to feel better about myself, but I can’t seem to get out of this hole. I don’t trust anyone to pick apart my psyche and tell me what’s wrong with me, but I need it. How do you go about these feelings?",3.1969027093596054,4.691442837438423,4.820193965517241,83.1020150862069,73.82758620689654,8.030665024630544,25.49538177339901,8.660442795831766,1.743886945812808,788,26,161,15,16,266,123,203,0.136,0.759,0.10400000000000001,-0.6579,0,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,4,8,16,0,2,10,1,23,0,0,4,1,35,41,10,0,4,4,1,5,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,8,12,0,1,8,0,0,2,5,8,1,1,3,6,21,8,27,33,1,18,0,4,0,0,9,8,0,4,9,106,29,4,0.0,0.1576417242148415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13322970580927862,0.13779900176335624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178238913031028,0.0,0.13194920448928155,0.0930311995763751,0.0,0.0,0.11844213024307865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767133857288545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922616025074628,0.21245816045477156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27433607683417577,0.22919042163562275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15248608278268455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787784133362757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957617735735368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363687470538819,0.19010096548075456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279359832470104,0.0,0.06951279434285157,0.0,0.15123002427770693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388689548473276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312044361573812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13000238436103628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14884819075213712,0.0,0.11311380009411272,0.0,0.1258945126519565,0.0,0.13489115871085045,0.13366595584854382,0.1449297476900676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865440769822703,0.0,0.0,0.14149949390491567,0.0,0.13036011465569106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015768339354813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617356109783407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284521034601302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211231319132445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15240758172531993,0.1390920694858751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629099691862248,0.0,0.1521535279166007,0.0,0.1767841532705356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611522743229858,0.0,0.0,0.09033177555154284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097796484009516,0.0,0.10560838166567944,0.0,0.0,0.11962734488382247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14546857857761514,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,candleshit,2020/04/03,"i think i was abused in the psych ward trigger warning!

last year when i was still 12 i was admitted to a child psych ward after attempting suicide. there were many problems there. i live in mississippi in the usa. i think i was abused

1) there were no therapists we would talk to just 1 on 1 at the ward which is really strange. 

2) the first day i was there they kept telling me things like that it was “my fault” i was there

3) a boy the same age as me would harass me and they wouldnt do anything about it. be would make sexual comments about me. 

4) i would cry for hours everyday and would receive no emotional support. actually the nurses would yell at me and tell me if i kept crying i would have to stay longer.

5) i literally tried to kill myself on multiple occasions and they didnt notice????!!!! i would cover my mouth and try to cease my breathing in hopes i would die

6) this one is more just in april. the nurse would flirt with my older sister who was 18 every time she would come drop stuff off for me. he was married and had kids...

7) twice i was crying too loud at night and woke up another patient and instead of comforting me they put me in “time away” which was an empty room with a police officer. 

these things have caused me trauma. i believe i have developed symptoms of PTSD",2.0303076923076944,4.149995261538463,3.125230769230768,91.1797692307692,79.07692307692308,6.621538461538463,21.93846153846154,7.699297019823105,0.8345723076923077,1008,30,216,16,25,323,152,260,0.198,0.754,0.049,-0.9916,0,0,0,0,2,2,31.0,1,0,4,2,13,10,2,0,11,0,34,3,2,3,0,38,44,11,3,15,3,1,0,1,0,12,1,2,1,3,11,12,0,2,3,0,0,3,4,5,0,3,18,2,39,5,29,13,2,35,0,0,0,0,18,15,0,2,16,151,50,2,0.0,0.21649596400238136,0.08915526941061057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580009518241428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518241331676814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858367751300657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293269100727047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938530318612122,0.0,0.07869951105648999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010676850938165,0.05892036117080899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09481841349082984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276895770093546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697567990676038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771171789523616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09074220176018044,0.0899722951512795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107753766477988,0.0,0.0,0.07447150267249336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04463442604588197,0.0,0.08067353851194681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06098425380939295,0.09262583109248426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573621761921357,0.0,0.0,0.10401523516309907,0.0,0.0,0.06190865608621037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742024863349195,0.10679625457975936,0.09184315485929667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058528269815579674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09737879279240837,0.07296110459399423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458661891903727,0.09993423149142973,0.10367551082136338,0.0,0.09495918021210344,0.0,0.07343260367940105,0.1597072831326266,0.0,0.0,0.1060772963744588,0.121392530668115,0.1170810272068273,0.0,0.0,0.10654680192927947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12405640020420955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7139034643534693,0.0,0.0,0.05883356278029379
mentalhealth,pret4life,2020/04/03,"Am i mentally underdeveloped?  now, i know that you stop maturing around 23 or something, well, a certain part of your brain does.

but, im 18 (M) and im immature asf. well not like childlike and stuff. i can take care of myself.

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but my mood is unstable asf

and the thing is that it is definitely different from others, well not too much, but im more temperamental, breaking out fights and etc.

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my peers are for sure different, more mature. like, everyone.

also my sense of identity is weird, constantly shifting around, sometimes thinking that im mentally ill, sometimes thinking that im aight

tho my self esteem is always god like for some reason

and i also might get mad for childish reasons, such as not being the center of attention and stuff like that

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am i a nut job?

or should i not be worried?

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tbh, i like this type of mindset you know?

i do have a fear tho, that i might lose all of my ambitions with maturity

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goooshh, gotta do something until its too late",5.3694235885308865,7.8207255226130625,5.2818267809636446,78.04398167307127,70.15577889447236,7.898433343186519,33.816435116760275,8.671277953709913,3.1230778007685487,885,44,145,16,17,275,112,199,0.19,0.6859999999999999,0.124,-0.9438,3,0,2,0,1,0,81.0,0,3,0,1,13,17,2,1,5,0,17,2,1,2,3,34,25,17,0,1,9,0,0,5,0,4,1,0,0,1,13,10,0,1,7,0,0,0,4,5,3,0,0,0,18,11,16,19,7,10,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,5,10,102,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05670085975178137,0.029498361160173764,0.499349764219158,0.5600044799714256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06311843099099558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039575428397892576,0.0,0.0,0.03614501159735893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03831031244496952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407822563651044,0.0,0.0,0.031023713196356557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039537623726219814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03387528187595003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03989262212312114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018521865926068724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914676945056186,0.0,0.03517999227073793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038966267027780416,0.0,0.03999066425664603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659868862874967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03966098987261472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07145324029085869,0.0752165549694464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0260608195780473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03839035475355708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289977951438342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03698348720936659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05458435877338925,0.07012457855077392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02963891400863565,0.0,0.0,0.08116662270681559,0.0,0.0,0.0334124755734224,0.0,0.026655001428442432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023552300088675454,0.04543158417225196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562505711256587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03600256434781807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5600044799714256,0.0
mentalhealth,SorrowSeven,2020/04/03,"Friday blues Hi everyone, I hope you are all doing ok. So this isn't really related to current global events but I have found that I seek to get down on Fridays of all days... Normally happens after I get home from work but I really feel it this morning. I don't really know what brings it on. My mood shifts, I get grumpy very easily and I find myself saying things to push others away. I find it really hard to tell others about this but I guess I just wanted to know if anyone else out there gets this too or am I alone?",1.7633333333333354,3.6724034814814814,3.699777777777779,87.77300000000002,79.0,7.282962962962964,17.28148148148148,8.238735603445708,0.6008525925925925,408,7,86,8,10,138,75,108,0.045,0.884,0.07,0.3716,1,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,1,6,3,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,20,19,7,0,4,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,12,2,0,0,6,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,4,15,2,14,18,2,12,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,4,4,59,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18421533719039684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436790963565855,0.1822445411108273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671107830730818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470873269974345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14858406065146107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1699584033135623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993429758693625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3251322552677322,0.0,0.0,0.19502067959484645,0.0,0.0,0.3717101774338202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959392420072828,0.0,0.1572861479896846,0.0,0.15933282896705786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784139092878738,0.17666088189988285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19550079469104747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742707288890017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4557815684931663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14144603077893245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15546255731489755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816614049417087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675792050768158,0.10490986282713363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12948842773670882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dadeeeed,2020/04/03,"How much of an idea can online tests give you of what disorder you might have? Is there any use in taking them at all? I'm going to get diagnosed soon, but I'd just like to be a little more sure. I get severe to moderate on aspergers, adhd, anxiety and depression. Are there any truths in those tests?",2.8150819672131107,4.425894114754102,4.4499672131147525,84.88806557377049,75.0655737704918,8.814426229508197,22.036065573770493,9.3871,1.717135081967213,235,6,49,6,5,79,50,61,0.18100000000000002,0.6829999999999999,0.136,-0.5209,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,1,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,2,3,10,13,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,9,11,3,7,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,1,2,33,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918318260220256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302624607256314,0.0,0.18576260172420395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20914722761514515,0.246465104683238,0.0,0.0,0.2783016954748257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537350054480544,0.23294255168279154,0.13800463424313275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741230281735351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863339697370318,0.243377247930694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25760192117165354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17850637252237442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27432629488896515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288623269787041,0.0,0.18257628469129228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20972525304692255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zombiemuss106,2020/04/03,"I don't even know anymore Some days I wonder why I keep going. Im tired of feeling this pit. Idk fuck im just typing this as im thinking Its like I want to talk to someone but I don't want to at the same time. I wanna tell my best friend and open up to him but I can't I feel like I annoy him. I feel like he just puts up with me even tho he says he genuinely enjoys hanging out and talking to me i just feel like he doesn't:/ and I hate feeling like that i love the guy but idk. Id be devastated if anything happened to him. Everything is confusing nothing is a straight its always blurry i get so into my head that ill be up till 5 in the morning thinking. I haven't been to a doctor to get checked to see what's wrong with me but to be quit honest im scared and i know i really shouldn't be to open on the internet but i really don't care because int the end whatever happens happens. I have great friend, family but I just can't sometimes i try to stay strong but im losing grip incant reach out i just feel stuck. Its like i was given a puzzle and i gotta put it together and find how to solve it but i don't know how to solve it. It's just like i want to cry sometimes but can't. I hate feeling like im being annoying to people but they say im not but i dont believe them. Idk i just can't i just want to turn off my phone and ignore everyone. My life is just a whirlwind of fuckrey that i can't understand. 



I wanna cry but cant let it out.",-1.142764477031271,0.8411386349693295,1.7723253030076336,96.51788642825079,92.09815950920245,4.775579829417926,18.38066736495586,6.345904618129536,-0.14957450246895074,1129,34,272,13,41,394,149,326,0.155,0.596,0.249,0.9872,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,4,15,27,5,2,9,0,26,7,1,2,0,68,61,26,0,8,23,0,8,8,2,2,4,2,0,1,14,15,0,2,15,0,1,4,15,10,0,0,4,11,44,17,36,49,3,23,0,1,1,2,19,14,1,5,12,168,58,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062062660792180174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07397062152459917,0.0,0.0,0.061379044204134425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04546776397535054,0.0,0.0,0.08403441593137398,0.07827483542448849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604678720677416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16386143103219866,0.04810267844940351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634332620739948,0.0,0.0,0.08741583352576611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06606226460399438,0.0,0.0,0.09852849915766758,0.0,0.0,0.07127142138136976,0.06703431212711597,0.0,0.07031432739925314,0.0,0.2639952815802423,0.2664261338949576,0.0,0.0,0.06817149819626629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1152520227197852,0.06895481488332722,0.07793763700742974,0.0,0.0423897170593056,0.0,0.0,0.08223283063594239,0.0,0.07385321562997144,0.19787207538323756,0.0,0.0,0.14727915749103251,0.07654815253149372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5639700564087265,0.0,0.0,0.06629667500384409,0.0,0.0,0.1229737916498751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07627063175600997,0.05268326004865452,0.2915169426928022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08344418009463686,0.0,0.0,0.06731800687488447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715685860930516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051709485835330235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499618012580781,0.0,0.0793328413160926,0.0,0.0,0.09556514886176837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862972899043522,0.07467496188126682,0.0,0.05943647117206065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319763032651067,0.0,0.1475376177055946,0.0,0.0,0.0795002044183837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990099355476218,0.06519264252543874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558514055827114,0.0,0.0,0.043492490975730776,0.0857272011195826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05063992319492154,0.08112963226066855,0.0,0.07764807498119268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17597423592688427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730349346769862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088681310788409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154957213523989,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pjm1992,2020/04/03,"See moving pictures and draw outlines in my mind I see moving pictures in my mind for example imagine playing with dominoes and watching them fall, in my head the line of dominoes just keeps going and going with no end. I also have a habit of drawing outlines in my mind like around patterns on wallpaper. Does anyone know why I do this and what it is?",6.533382352941178,6.756387338235296,6.4841176470588255,78.85352941176474,65.32352941176471,7.976470588235292,36.117647058823536,7.1686216300943375,2.65975294117647,281,13,49,2,4,89,47,68,0.033,0.904,0.064,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,3,1,1,0,0,14,9,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,2,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,3,8,2,11,9,0,12,0,0,3,0,1,6,0,0,2,34,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16257661996258804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215006143546444,0.0,0.0,0.18097752331763428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17790666498646618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18006089163900005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310768574397915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20864147907677916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18069980624266085,0.0,0.0,0.11172677122831727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932069567966234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6158163621618842,0.0,0.0,0.4321452948178632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3240029405370965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18344401477694247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DougDinkleburg,2020/04/03,"I find it hard to have real conversation's with people So for context, I'm 16 and I started 10th grade about 7 months ago. I can interact with other people socially and im pretty extroverted. But I feel like I can only talk to people when im joking around, and if the conversation gets really serious or confrontational, I never know what to say. I get really anxious and I usually just wait for someone else to start talking so the attentions drawn away from me. I feel like everyone else knows what they're doing all the time, but I don't even know what's going on most of the time. Ever since I started school I felt different than every one else",2.8945348837209286,5.103035604651165,4.884670542635657,79.1888662790698,76.67441860465118,8.331007751937985,23.92829457364341,9.075114841892004,2.122787596899225,519,17,97,13,12,178,86,129,0.053,0.885,0.062,0.2442,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,1,0,4,0,5,0,0,0,3,26,19,11,0,1,5,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,1,8,1,0,1,2,2,0,1,1,5,13,3,15,18,2,15,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,3,13,60,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12096896565862005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541678518928637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148376340335584,0.0,0.0,0.12821439515515626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.142578031412886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3419997521846238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013457342469497,0.12344140222247167,0.11497857679237633,0.1303992087264332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13800272318477638,0.19498282128004066,0.13102885880235435,0.0,0.12472754506916985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259581188082507,0.0,0.07755683071189233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224682284827346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2948136160358596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22499460252696288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333408886785127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892594077004553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525107084301268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247296258432924,0.10378862007979278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838252376291326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13883508633136932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15532830047357615,0.17484735889743094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10852332177443846,0.0,0.13811098094880964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288616989661394,0.0,0.0,0.13911000555594172,0.11562728549871178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289774228457448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21937256732108784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914896318482355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029813172766773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pretendingtosmile,2020/04/03,"I completed my first year at university! As a male rugby player the expectation is high, coming into a university setting is meant to be the making of you, that you become the best of the best, and that nothing can stand in your way.  Living with mental health issues makes this ideal borderline unachievable. I am unable to motivate myself, the smallest task feels like an accomplishment, however from the outside in it doesnt look like that. Im a happy, if not socially awkward 18 year old, pretty standard stuff from a uni standpoint, however trying to reach that expectation is almost impossible, seeing that getting out of bed and talking to uni mates ive convinced myself hate me are tasks that I could spend days overcoming at a time. Because of this, the idea of finishing a year of university being an achievement is mind boggling to them. I cant count the number of times ive considered and made moves towards dropping out or a lot worse. I dont really know how to write this kind of stuff, as its not exactly what im used to. I guess i just wanted to see if anyone feels the same kind of external pressure, and what they did to overcome it; how they reach out to people who seem to care (movember and other mental health campaigns are big in the club) but dont know what its like to get help, and selfishly, i guess such for someone who can relate or even be proud of me for finishing this year. 

Hope you’re all staying safe in these tough times",12.10279569892473,7.585412344086023,11.235802867383516,64.20037096774196,58.175627240143356,14.314121863799286,42.953763440860214,11.602472056035307,4.8068692473118295,1160,42,210,22,10,377,163,279,0.042,0.8059999999999999,0.152,0.9812,2,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,3,3,8,5,19,1,2,19,0,20,2,0,7,2,51,42,15,0,8,8,0,2,3,1,0,2,0,1,1,23,12,0,1,8,1,1,2,6,5,0,1,3,5,21,14,40,35,5,32,0,0,3,0,14,13,0,10,15,145,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580350315653757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388012124057375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440952314324035,0.11669347280533912,0.0,0.0,0.22176788049397592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772769259599448,0.0,0.0,0.0910169714041125,0.1107827884217437,0.0,0.0,0.08436113220308211,0.0,0.0,0.06814213653696212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476661115605288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978761535540852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10685001989457947,0.0754837218138745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987457622650481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110406265794838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327934110606557,0.0,0.0,0.11247732784286164,0.0,0.1043176469825781,0.0,0.22462386357558556,0.0,0.0,0.07082185533650204,0.11163588204697958,0.0,0.10494449421450963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11927758984445334,0.22826245752011,0.11028187605223272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22005783464800127,0.11613624814243766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15486082027146209,0.0,0.09329995891003587,0.0,0.08872802006414984,0.0,0.0,0.08982858764574354,0.0,0.09997830728403796,0.14105810850810674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129614119588164,0.0,0.10668675773337448,0.0,0.0,0.11230015116518938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013838838608482,0.0,0.11087268499652447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325153105046849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749448557410007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768867796793633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839511912592858,0.09618914634592082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077073445955531,0.08952560841391048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261979496405937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24191147252678705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492572697713609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848340687422318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173639123233498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912565532331666,0.0,0.0,0.06232116795809128,0.0838682084828514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767684737997446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27216701243962643
mentalhealth,throwRAstrugglinhard,2020/04/03,"Am I making excuses for myself or is something else going on? Hi everyone,

A little background, I’m a Canadian (Ontario) second year university student in a moderately challenging biological major. I have a lot of big ambitions and the intellect to get there but find my self struggling to keep up academically. In high school I was the kid that could just go to class and skip the homework but end up with the high 90 mark so I really never found a grove for studying. 

Since starting University all of these problems have surfaced, I’ve been diagnosed with situational depression on two separate occasions in the past year. I know the work ethic is an issue and I often leave things til the last minute and then once I sit down (slightly panicked) I get it done in one sitting or decide I won’t do well with the time I’ve left for myself and just give up. I also have struggled with sleeping for the past year, often staying up for 24+ hours until I pass out from exhaustion (melatonin does nothing for me). I really struggle to keep up with every day commitments, even ones that I’m excited for. I especially struggle with going to class or some days even opening my laptop to do work. I’m always late if I do show up. I make schedules, lists, plans to keep myself organized but I’m only able to stick to it for a week at most (even that is hard) and then I revert to old habits. I genuinely want to do well but find it takes huge amounts of energy to just sit myself down to work on something as small as a discussion post, always racing to the last minute. Overall I have a hard time regulating myself and my time. 

I have tried vyvanse a few times(not through a prescription) and found it worked well for me, I didn’t feel daunted by the idea of doing work and was able to sit and focus like never before. 

Anytime I bring this stuff up to my parents they insinuate I’m making excuses.

Is this all a combination of poor work ethic and insomnia working in a vicious cycle? Am I looking for excuses for myself? Or should I try finding some better resources (if so, what?)? 

Any advice at this point is greatly appreciated.",4.767913610431947,6.224063562347193,5.941180929095356,76.7497339038305,69.85574572127139,8.778516707416463,30.25925020374898,9.21078282632365,2.7309236511817447,1683,68,305,34,30,562,214,409,0.08900000000000001,0.826,0.085,-0.6756,1,0,2,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,1,10,15,16,1,4,24,0,25,4,1,3,5,62,51,30,0,6,13,1,3,1,0,2,3,0,1,2,14,19,0,3,9,1,1,5,4,8,3,4,7,4,36,8,65,41,9,66,0,1,1,0,10,30,0,12,26,215,50,16,0.1565565464806415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764926226517524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259910682912333,0.1302675881553465,0.0,0.0,0.05323191007978454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660904506026283,0.0,0.0,0.0692307714646624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062498831621331276,0.0,0.0,0.10096602088006988,0.0,0.06742096203961087,0.07945079959421854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850184442057929,0.0801058511608262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653914528436532,0.0,0.06933131586848579,0.0,0.0,0.15510618364576284,0.0,0.0659528213192115,0.07479824462283004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03957984694925207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21463477083349047,0.0,0.0,0.17165617250396772,0.0,0.0,0.08179433390297039,0.07509165248565937,0.13346203981796698,0.0,0.0,0.08630207259403416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402439148070594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654105869076534,0.0,0.0,0.07708833118433488,0.0,0.0,0.08836664242415596,0.0,0.0817021799290314,0.0,0.20873197777618768,0.0,0.0,0.043019691819179834,0.12761448070563325,0.08830130177667156,0.08288538887110497,0.08504957291474484,0.0,0.0,0.03824281031691254,0.07845539422704766,0.0,0.0,0.06573403463497855,0.0,0.0,0.06654938865137958,0.0,0.0,0.15675406568600234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074606005081726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07511011435079172,0.0,0.0821398799428337,0.0833638062744722,0.10608676761055164,0.0595341541533498,0.0,0.0,0.08691875882429677,0.0,0.14945093835825304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739982699860179,0.0,0.07496894765093731,0.0,0.0,0.07490173577926881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029413253498297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922179159676143,0.0,0.0,0.08166131084669911,0.0,0.0,0.06475259652974923,0.08798805885320185,0.07833480487309205,0.0,0.0,0.1205248781416313,0.0,0.0,0.055405764695560286,0.08343422401851604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273337889042231,0.08960989494737717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05885551962541735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05200460648310525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13693407187088782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10629161841874492,0.0,0.07646649867782944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046170553677267384,0.0,0.06279010912073077,0.0,0.2111447054572208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3989126064608176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122592453829875
mentalhealth,AudiophiloMilo,2020/04/03,"I'm not sure what I need... Things lately have been stressful to say the least, and I've had a resurgence of thoughts that I've been dealing with on and off for a while now that make me feel like I'm nearing a panic attack.

Since this is a common occurrence now and they are intrusive, I thought I'd seek help but I'm unsure of what I need. Do I see a therapist, a counselor?

I want treatment that'll help get to the root of the problem and/or identify/recognize if there's something up with my brain, but I don't know who is better suited to that.",5.84655072463768,4.743299930434785,6.25021739130435,84.38952898550723,67.08695652173913,9.405797101449275,32.210144927536234,8.344100000000001,2.16140579710145,432,15,95,5,6,140,76,115,0.128,0.757,0.115,-0.1106,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,1,3,7,1,2,9,0,10,1,1,2,1,20,23,7,0,5,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,9,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,3,9,3,13,17,1,9,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,1,6,61,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23530504437724803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829290385904336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23089662967535185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21323814020719745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10458215612516857,0.14776319906044103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806292163487337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772747198057153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367128660347485,0.0,0.23331925816448856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104929320107267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380641869909859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30673154859655505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426766912773573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1979134743840044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644837539305637,0.0,0.0,0.16482097669724094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17109632001526093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592319399180141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369291684536845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949398480655252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401517566799478,0.13741220074492586,0.0,0.0,0.3284082920911228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199683488550472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hbakery,2020/04/03,"I didn’t think quarantine would get to me. Hey all, so I thought quarantine would be a breeze but tonight it’s just hit me, I miss my friends and human contact as a whole. I used to be an introvert basically staying inside all day everyday but I’ve come out of my shell in the past few months and it’s just hitting me hard you know. I understand that many people are going through the same thing and during this time we can communicate and talk to one another, so if anyone is feeling the same way as me feel free to message me and we can have a chat :)",2.242368421052632,4.040094114035089,3.6577543859649104,89.14294736842106,77.15789473684211,7.3670175438596495,26.31228070175439,8.238735603445708,1.59809754385965,435,17,95,8,10,143,80,114,0.03,0.845,0.125,0.9161,0,3,0,0,1,0,8.0,2,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,7,0,10,0,0,1,2,27,23,12,0,3,5,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,5,9,0,0,6,1,1,2,1,1,0,1,2,3,15,3,10,15,6,12,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,1,6,66,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241124362782518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16078754559261935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198082991657354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14829979568574686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325409346504554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776600801937791,0.0,0.1201402501587212,0.0,0.13068682621663014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059915180450736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637541722727236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331348884032869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18354521917970928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15582119434313216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21951487669201614,0.15941952572268012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450978708934576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18482643191472609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15276966347565613,0.1473437371091004,0.0,0.18255593023543232,0.1340866607324034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2393877851773806,0.0,0.19860440084855926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825249223846976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567328135935817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3267021197586479,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nowlickitup,2020/04/03,"Coping? Hey! 

So I’m 29yo female. I have two boys 7 and 2. I am REALLY REALLY struggling to cope/deal with them. I come home from a full time job, pick the kids up and do the night time routine. Some times my partner is home some times not, depending on work. As soon as I pick them up they don’t listen, they are loud and drive me absolutely batshit crazy. I’m angry, resentful and self destructive all of the time. 

I’m currently finding that I HATE being around them, I don’t want to do anything for them, feed them etc. I still do as I know I have too. How ever I would rather lay on a bed of rusty, piping hot razors than be a mum/responsible adult. 

The covid lockdown has exacerbate these feelings. I no longer have respite from them in the form of family helping out or being able to take them any where to wear them out. 

I spoke to my psych about it and said maybe my antidepressants need to be upped. She said she “could drug me to the eye balls and it won’t help at the moment”. I see a psychiatrist once a fortnight. 

My partner also works full time, he is very supportive but is also becoming quite grumpy because the kids just don’t listen. 

I really need some help, I need to know I’m not alone. Please please please help me.",2.598062986150637,4.259290749003983,3.6921457029026734,89.88022576361223,75.77290836653387,7.171390627964335,21.514133940428767,7.957251820313856,0.771087497628534,962,24,211,15,21,311,146,251,0.09699999999999999,0.8390000000000001,0.064,-0.7796,2,2,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,10,3,13,5,3,1,13,0,22,4,2,4,2,36,43,15,0,7,6,0,2,0,2,2,1,6,3,7,4,11,1,0,4,1,0,2,7,4,0,1,3,10,34,1,30,33,8,27,0,0,2,0,30,13,0,5,12,134,38,4,0.11271066583428392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11673425804601892,0.0,0.18026935749286974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664711778073276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275127441049648,0.10033638864133214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870737575000163,0.12448007518668415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709025853183648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999029531832557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13070858909964622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570218612419828,0.0,0.10195325005450714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625358475618492,0.0,0.056989899222398485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301550664665857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11127844795013392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30219033387940725,0.0,0.22611597539550995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11184794429948317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12388566860792412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323301317369172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507205916933813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577132465557784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003318063531565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3711673941249837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988166694485013,0.0,0.0,0.2166160159649594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21442730738234506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08981580797082571,0.0,0.11758180574799525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001088332956157,0.0,0.0,0.11782966003921125,0.0,0.0,0.12790272790692633,0.0,0.0,0.08474439369194715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39433497385881305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010194301980533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299810332911797,0.06647967094171722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410941420981995,0.0,0.0,0.08006642318169095,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_dmnz,2020/04/03,"I cant I'm afraid I am scared I will get back stabbed I can't trust in anyone I don't want to do anything I don't know what I am living for, I need serious help I i got emotionally back stabbed two times this month",-2.7324222222222225,-1.252618019999998,0.2646666666666686,103.06011111111114,109.2,3.8222222222222224,15.555555555555555,5.82211442006289,-0.8181111111111109,169,5,45,2,9,58,32,50,0.312,0.627,0.061,-0.8490000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,0,0,8,0,0,0,0,3,14,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,1,0,10,1,3,12,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,26,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21014131136754804,0.0,0.24731499384344044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4621862814915745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3380618288218073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570173213561252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403655816599141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014425166606527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651663740675887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653782287667105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398844569180279,0.0,0.0,0.2228431612222144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008883239775287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175244585140904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29357937702915743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17726354181289933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SupremeBungus,2020/04/03,"Not myself, but I need to help another Hello, everyone! I’m here for some advice. I have a friend right now who is absolutely stressed out of their mind and in a bad mental state. I’ve been trying my best to help them but at times it’s hard to know what to say. They have the weight of the world on their shoulders and can’t seem to find relief. I need to know, what would you tell the person if you were in my situation? They mean a lot to me and I couldn’t stand if something bad happened to them. They’re currently being treated, but I constantly worry about if the situation escalates or not. As of now, they are not participating in self harm that I know of. Any advice at this point would help.",3.1524475524475517,4.4969450839160885,4.333146853146854,87.15048951048954,73.68531468531468,7.717482517482518,22.79020979020979,8.296473431620573,1.0421664335664331,549,14,120,9,11,180,90,143,0.141,0.705,0.153,0.4502,1,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,7,1,4,8,0,1,7,0,11,2,1,0,0,28,20,11,0,8,10,0,2,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,6,4,1,0,6,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,3,19,4,22,14,3,17,0,0,0,0,19,10,0,7,5,84,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904850917906449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107560539606704,0.15585476575663776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24820486153286386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559812693650486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061957909769026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202529735424185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584796142342356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148335649843942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13143576017671188,0.0,0.13314606380826824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988769032621613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24505459533907265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263625471375077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16190502006718846,0.0,0.0,0.1497872067366922,0.0,0.150077061282508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22041912185282425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297806905801341,0.0,0.0,0.14050632272800553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693185597309872,0.0,0.11819900745885673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530999270730476,0.15505673981819176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33413966558339026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11442502255878005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702587147974499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991188137584306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866691563572424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091211891607817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18099507479441174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15094412869356194,0.0,0.2111693806449024,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alythedweeb,2020/04/03,"i don’t know whether or not to go to a hospital recently i’ve really been considering getting admitted into a mental hospital for a week or two. i’m stuck in self-isolation because of the corona virus anyways, so it’s not like i would have to catch up on school or miss hanging out with anyone. but i’m terrified to bring it up to my mom and doctor. if anyone has been to a mental hospital and sees this, could you let me know what your experience(s) was/were like?",2.142409356725146,4.2347696736842115,4.4256140350877216,82.13374269005851,78.57894736842105,8.432748538011698,25.292397660818715,9.150863307647796,2.2909415204678365,369,14,74,10,9,128,69,95,0.145,0.8420000000000001,0.013000000000000001,-0.8967,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,5,0,8,1,0,0,0,18,19,9,0,3,8,1,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,4,3,1,0,1,3,1,6,2,15,13,0,12,0,1,1,0,4,6,0,4,4,51,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.316799263516127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809458588163126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18087101173194756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23186977092501365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183560039698536,0.0,0.1287459490226492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489971406465758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23164898350810945,0.0,0.2213486432963047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4565911461231897,0.0,0.0,0.26531688410460746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14512512275660686,0.0,0.22367752592334755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292670954897208,0.1805203105483912,0.0,0.23632704050675998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22129330454136314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18171396598636208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16092507436945433,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angsttty-teen,2020/04/03,"(Story) why don’t Hispanic parents believe in mental disorders ? And how do I ask for help ? I will get to the story later 
I think I have a lot of mental disorders I don’t want to self  diagnoses but I really do believe that I have more than one mental disorder 

 when I was in 7th grade (I’m (15f) in hs now ) I was pretty sure I was depressed looking back on it now I’m certain that I was . Anyways my sister could tell that there was something wrong so she told my parents that I was depressed and they just said “ she’s just moody ,it’s just a phase “ anyways I just don’t understand how you can see your child in pain ( my mom saw my cuts ) and not do anything about it 

I guess my question is how do successfully ask for help ?",0.8186837748344367,2.948068728476823,2.8601614238410638,91.36587127483446,83.56953642384107,5.8942052980132456,22.68253311258277,7.1686216300943375,0.8040096026490069,562,20,122,8,16,189,86,151,0.17,0.7020000000000001,0.128,-0.8717,2,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,1,1,16,9,1,0,3,0,19,2,0,3,2,21,33,9,0,2,6,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,7,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,9,4,24,3,12,22,2,10,0,2,3,0,19,5,0,3,5,88,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589997973877427,0.0,0.2406134542084919,0.0,0.0,0.09895380196091444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28997658923769265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10274759577663016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22167908022629704,0.13061650000590733,0.0,0.0,0.4424658020698352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723462614149668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14176530514990696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17251488153925068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080662445077868,0.0,0.0,0.10940668020424278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3890643564258396,0.0,0.0,0.15071885593859452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0872029127019549,0.0,0.1369340370375395,0.0,0.2857875344356724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092285112291224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416099267191154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824413890719442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241259029353273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254837256722037,0.0,0.13425056340737493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907098372137664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128774242335533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247974959662337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245863535104515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296773561899647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339696581119007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590403313069206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612169408949373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070108371361534,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bspeedy,2020/04/03,"[M16] I already take meds but I depersonalize on a daily basis, what can I do? Title.

I’ve been diagnosed with ADHD, ODD and clinical depression.

I take Adderall and Sertraline daily in the mornings  to treat my ADHD and Depression.

A problem I have had on an almost daily basis for the past few weeks, is I depersonalize. This tends to happen when I think about stressful topics (As that’s a trigger for the problem). But now it just occurs on a daily basis (usually at night) without a lot of reason, and it’s agony to be stuck in that state of mind until I end up going to bed to reset the timer, to when tomorrow night I’ll inevitably have another “episode”.

I’m already going to therapy, and I’m not sure if this is a side effect of growing up with the medications/conditions I have, or it’s a possible foreshadowing of a much bigger mental health issue I have. I’m honestly tearing up just writing this because I really don’t know what to do, or how to move forward when this has just become the norm.",6.433787878787879,6.104558439393943,7.938080808080809,70.21045454545455,65.61616161616162,10.634343434343435,34.16161616161617,10.230975488527342,3.5469737373737367,793,32,142,17,11,277,113,198,0.155,0.7959999999999999,0.048,-0.9726,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,9,8,0,1,15,0,14,3,0,4,1,30,26,16,0,3,10,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,11,7,0,0,4,0,0,5,3,5,0,0,3,0,12,3,30,22,3,29,0,2,0,0,1,12,0,5,13,104,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3427391377536137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278670266953195,0.0,0.3147107477758984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952162346951364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692361931091623,0.15748321849304964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456309904011753,0.1447293097139988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262954374085284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16207824208633187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609488165577393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15157012699946146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883047324445178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836560906747532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12122781810371693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158389133270906,0.0,0.14370061908280168,0.0,0.1439786954191267,0.0,0.0,0.15155422850643668,0.10482256345342268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26762851172852603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612154474952134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16075264486772875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728852716669887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09134898984206484,0.14660977451230928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16334026953079167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343926015236023,0.0,0.2144249968974562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16306799162229288,0.0,0.0,0.09136809954159976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15704649581268304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437983250418172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374549589073774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wntrs_Demons,2020/04/03,"Touch... I realized tonight, I miss physical touch. TW: brief mention of past trauma Sometimes, it's the little things you forget about that have such a huge impact on your life... At least in my case.

I have been going through a lot recently.  Lots of deleted suicide watch posts, etc. 

My best friend lives 300 miles (482km) away, soon to be about 1000 miles. (1609km) and aside from him, I have no one I have been able to allow to touch me.  Currently working on getting out of a bad (not abusive.. Just bad) relationship and I don't touch him at all. Actually, I cant even look at him.  Waiting for this current world situation to pass so that I can safely leave him..

Once, years ago, before I was completely burdened by PTSD and depression, I went to school for massage therapy (never practiced after because of sexual trauma shortly after graduating, among other things.) But in the school I learned how important good physical contact is, even for those who are not touchy feely.  I have never been much of a hugger, but when I love someone and can actually (rarely) trust them, I need touch. A back scratch, a short cuddle, foot rub, or mostly a shoulder to cry on.

I realized today that I have not had genuine touch in a very long time.  My cat is at least something.. But God, do I miss my friend.  I hate not having someone I trust enough to touch me.  It has been way too long and I feel very alone.",2.740660566199601,5.055586539033463,3.578828996282528,87.83179511009439,77.6617100371747,6.517643694595367,24.84429511009436,7.61054688173877,1.2848025736345443,1085,39,214,16,26,345,167,269,0.11699999999999999,0.7509999999999999,0.132,0.8089,2,2,1,0,0,1,56.0,0,2,1,2,12,17,1,0,10,0,23,5,2,2,3,31,34,12,1,1,9,0,10,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,11,6,0,2,4,0,0,4,9,9,0,1,7,12,33,8,35,26,10,44,0,3,2,2,14,20,0,4,18,149,44,5,0.12095287705038085,0.14330938094388074,0.2360651206777965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10721742762616523,0.0,0.0,0.12527070314505045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11363920951407212,0.0930052964762071,0.20198120026403688,0.07373175120589565,0.0,0.10292198976953616,0.0,0.12693258226486864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268167903625385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13286105593028513,0.0,0.0,0.10417653576950613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497665473511095,0.1348944303602857,0.15977646911604998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061157408863994525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18689578554508016,0.0,0.0631928861129234,0.0,0.06874030738787687,0.10144953469947646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119415925135771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12807163257959836,0.0,0.0,0.08543259406221877,0.0,0.12122655826540778,0.10680360639491876,0.2140789800490291,0.10156995396181864,0.0,0.0,0.20565962150483794,0.10916469385357516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891428164843293,0.08968502574451721,0.1865726305792046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881086658378474,0.08196079977439982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546320724790017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583942175093265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14138744065253853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942637422343905,0.12985812460149598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448215378818113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13595610153151852,0.0,0.0,0.2049659604357321,0.09311543397630734,0.1196254881598846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13230281604678534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832015605486914,0.0,0.16071143405765534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052859528534844,0.0,0.1146491847950612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995975815531723,0.0,0.09600676390958124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212452880072432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805513503449032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788968722459975
mentalhealth,jojo1717__,2020/04/03,sitting in a pool of sad and I need some advice :( I’ve been home since my university shut down a couple weeks ago. My best friend lives in town and since I’ve been here we hung out everyday. everything seemed normal until the other day. I logged onto her spam account and she wrote this really mean post saying she was done with me and tired of living in my shadow. I felt really hurt and tried asking if she was okay and what I could’ve done to fix it. She didn’t answer any of my calls. Now she’s hanging with our mutual friends and it sucks because my anxiety is telling me that they must hate me too. I don’t know what I did. I’ve just been myself and I’ve been nothing but kind since I’ve been here. I’ve been running through my head every little action I could’ve done that would’ve caused a problem in such a short amount of time. I just keep hating every part of myself because I just don’t understand what I did wrong. Im trying to tell myself that someone who ends a friendship like that is immature and probably not a good friend in the 1st place but it’s just really hard to not beat up on myself. Anyways guess I’m just asking for advice and fishing for some love. ✨,2.6891224489795924,4.2473385959183725,3.780969387755104,89.7734948979592,75.28571428571428,6.6959183673469385,21.22959183673469,7.365786028017652,0.5505877551020406,936,22,199,11,20,303,139,245,0.14400000000000002,0.755,0.1,-0.794,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,2,0,1,2,11,16,3,0,8,1,19,3,1,1,1,40,35,14,0,5,10,0,2,1,3,1,1,1,1,0,13,14,0,1,6,1,1,3,5,7,0,0,16,3,32,9,24,18,5,28,0,2,0,1,21,15,1,5,9,126,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090330552590509,0.09481036929096504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273399979963631,0.0,0.08182133087061791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999795372033612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130399221751046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122441124175143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092144129739984,0.0,0.0,0.10987365524762642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17079191784815292,0.11834518989121895,0.0,0.06897801085339904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283605052053476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09473159815097468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18023071069316005,0.0,0.09612548944271276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269488891789738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479026801720679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970992927372427,0.0,0.0,0.11782450074801808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581189981900193,0.2111945457378555,0.10976809330230744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728596055079452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449900701121132,0.0,0.1155312342144212,0.0,0.0,0.09506773667020477,0.0,0.1113786012454404,0.058780424212974365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05225348017305459,0.10719838193740744,0.18888886980604933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653230045659862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165068430803108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930679367122123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10479453434640032,0.1026275223630536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582332669905752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174664292974608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243463770602106,0.0,0.11531705766661644,0.10234280203352418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20555696962885528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08505599893408322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736906292964774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654262454209369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09062378584918923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18696916465520602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06236711990416239,0.12293061425837125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14523270987617554,0.0,0.0,0.1113453539688426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579394910611594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597873705198355,0.11694000112179567,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rant-rant-rant,2020/04/03,"I’ve been feeling shit and have no idea what to do. Help. So basically, I’m the kind of person who has no real life friends. Where do I start with my scenario. I’m 16, and I know that there’s a lot to life but right now I really need help with this. 

So there was this girl I really liked who was a great friend of mine. After she got to know back in November that I did, she ghosted me, then apologised for what she did before cutting me off without reason and asked me to not act oblivious to what I had done (I have no fucking idea about what to do). She blocked me from everywhere after that. I spent all of December to February thinking about what I might’ve done and when, in March, I was finally getting over it, she called randomly and after a bit of weird chatter she said “you know what happened. Right?” “No” “X didn’t tell you?” “No” then when I asked what happened, she said it was a long story and that she’ll tell me later. She blocked me again after that. Now I think I’m back to December, if not worse 🤦🏻‍♂️.

Second thing, one of the people I know started spreading rumours about me dating someone. One of my close friends who was also close friends with the rumour spreader, told me. I decided to confront the person who was spreading the rumour. This strained my friend’s friendship with the rumour spreader and her group, as well as, with me. She’s very pissed and disappointed at me and I don’t know what to do. 

These two things have had me feeling like shit for a week now. I feel nauseous all the time, don’t feel like eating, always tired and no motivation to do anything. I know that I can’t do anything about either situation now but some comforting words might help. Have a great day everyone :)",2.866797601199398,4.6180036057971,3.7569015492253897,89.31652173913048,75.26086956521739,6.8455772113943025,25.229885057471265,7.6298220110432995,1.1801324337831085,1344,46,282,18,29,430,159,345,0.13,0.6859999999999999,0.184,0.9747,0,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,2,0,1,20,22,6,1,13,0,30,8,3,2,2,52,59,22,1,2,7,0,4,3,5,2,3,2,0,3,26,17,1,2,17,0,1,1,13,9,1,4,19,6,46,13,41,38,6,36,0,1,0,1,41,10,4,5,28,203,72,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07257206288483017,0.07551056299629763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14935763709998087,0.0,0.16967641100448028,0.0,0.0,0.13956099027968238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772208431025561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907456854494696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926650290451704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058525694596097515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857357768300203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285903653318513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867147022921661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18354198884107634,0.12966242252939347,0.0,0.09941125861225543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35056284289738354,0.08389612734427869,0.04741268561413031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258038576426461,0.200102517643961,0.0,0.0,0.16049834820398928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18248172805257487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20488948982714927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450127541203164,0.2992401589859478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819761756832376,0.1330063530836392,0.0,0.0,0.08031014250180395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715168255256971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1925410154667524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728934523296556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298794599892755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06291403458755414,0.158477315753945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032924008102814,0.11627245917703788,0.09330524098520174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549985573998958,0.17264644698355747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18630539781881925,0.0,0.10200584742589254,0.0,0.0,0.07689146074426753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12846543164407048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586375149720462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057940642171988,0.11629678272744495,0.0,0.0,0.052916559454096485,0.10430279878448503,0.0,0.0867147022921661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886487336916519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487755319966269,0.0,0.0,0.07279349464352156,0.0,0.08159438485316893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08747894271119727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248113729766437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fabricalado,2020/04/03,"Any volunteering opportunities in Vancouver/Canada? Sorry if this is against the sub rules, but I'd like to volunteer. I have some background in psychology and plan to become a social worker in the near future. 

In short, I'd like to help!",4.515681818181818,7.0333419318181845,6.131818181818183,70.69272727272728,72.86363636363637,8.945454545454545,26.90909090909091,9.516144504307137,2.8482909090909088,191,7,32,5,4,65,34,44,0.024,0.7190000000000001,0.257,0.8999,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,3,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,9,2,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,2,3,20,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2932269340345637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47622026570918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890204735154903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42131954315696185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4395483228756709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4826867555513032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scenoir,2020/04/03,"16, ADHD and struggling with school i havent been diagnosed with ADHD because i didnt really wanna add any more burden to my family and maybe I dont wanna admit that I actually have ADHD. I have major depression and GAD for 2 years now. However, I cant really keep it to myself anymore and I think Im going insane. I cant even go to a therapist and ask about it because of the lockdown. December 2019 last year, I was given a leave from school until January 2020. Its a big school in my country and I have a scholarship so its really hard there. Due to my leave, I missed a lot. I tried to catch up with the things I missed when I came back on February. But even then, I was constantly absent due to my depressive episodes which lasts for days and I can't even get out of bed. Now, its April and while we are in lockdown, we have online classes. My teachers are trying to reach me and gave me works to do. I was given a deadline on two requirements days ago and I havent submitted it yet. But it was really really hard for me. I cant even start doing the task. Before doing it and just thinking of doing it, I panic a lot and my brain goes bersek and I just cry for hours. What I do to distract myself? Ive been hyperfocused on a video game thats all I do for the whole day. Its like an escape from reality its such a huge relief. But when I am out of the game, my heart hurts so much and I just cry and panic I dont know. I get severe mood swings. Its like Im being slapped with the reality that I actually am in. Sorry I know Im being selfish and a coward about this. My teachers messaged me earlier and my mom asking about the requirements I didnt pass on the deadline and I dont know how to tell them because theyve been very supportive of me ever since and helped me through things and I am so ashamed this is what Im doing to them now. Even if I get to start to do a task like readings, I tend to get distracted a lot. My brain just gets very noisy it keeps talking and its so difficult for me to focus. Whatever I do, I cant get myself start a task. I cant focus on one task and get it finished. I know ppl will mostly say JUST do it. I know that Ive always been telling myself that but Im the fear is eating me up I do not know what to do. Im sorry this is all over the place I dont know if anyone will read or understand what Im saying. Maybe I just wanna know if Im not the only one who suffers from this kind of .. whatever this is",1.053520278833968,2.7270431653992406,3.4898336501901177,89.56020041191385,80.27376425855513,6.7407477820025345,20.654150823827628,7.720077496677588,0.6944196451204059,1899,51,428,31,48,660,208,526,0.114,0.855,0.031,-0.9833,1,2,0,0,0,0,43.0,2,0,2,3,29,23,0,7,25,0,53,5,3,1,3,75,89,40,0,6,16,1,2,3,0,2,1,2,1,0,34,32,1,4,12,5,1,5,16,16,0,3,14,4,70,6,56,71,10,49,0,6,0,0,19,16,0,8,31,308,104,11,0.0,0.0,0.11372347404792753,0.0,0.2100825601962829,0.0,0.051651587973354486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04848413342525338,0.0,0.0,0.03962463829009545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0577867825479933,0.040742751886281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894652911888253,0.0,0.0,0.044804947845590685,0.0,0.10655997214704906,0.0,0.0495822771229829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009403067418968,0.0,0.06664374230658983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296764386534162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801061675427064,0.11273525741326886,0.0,0.10037329977397837,0.05914139077596885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27316140700670705,0.0,0.0,0.05962331279712711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924292657765096,0.052707274231321766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05493043945937112,0.06556836168620651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21310052778105465,0.0,0.06623076328113435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043944203446322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904855791620018,0.03905620661754588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738282235200829,0.0,0.06237772912107933,0.0,0.5035205960970821,0.0,0.0,0.10358359746451737,0.0,0.060677768303200326,0.2561831390429458,0.09499335325296578,0.0,0.1233960437876037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540126723237003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861361069622767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707725794310365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06824346660619626,0.0,0.0,0.04283411701187734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896860713119347,0.04431588723187928,0.0,0.13673126785495712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06087827313802949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656871360060415,0.0,0.18664174920461926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267504059862372,0.0,0.17691276709834536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582691950247245,0.0,0.04820037853216536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045382859601584,0.12372842052579998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060914980159532166,0.0,0.0,0.06612250370753604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046834084255552924,0.10185862926929094,0.0,0.0,0.06765432229112517,0.07742212211522202,0.07467231744731674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912109347192267,0.0,0.056919944200343776,0.06065965557307481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615537577350483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06505479816087369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04242022639824696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504612115720412
mentalhealth,PuzzleheadedExtreme5,2020/04/03,"I Need Advice Trigger Warning: suicide, physical & sexual abuse
I need help. 
My family recently moved away from our abuser (my moms husband, my stepdad, my siblings father) he molested me when I was 10 (am now 15) and beat my mom for like 10 years. He got in a car accident (karma) and my mom has been letting him visit our house, eat her food and use her and sleep in her bed. I don’t understand this because he put our family in so much pain. Because of the corona Virus, my mom wants to move to where he’s living because theres not as much cases. This means I’ll have to be with him every day until the virus ends probably. At this point, it hurts so much that I feel like there’s no option other then to kill myself. I’ve been self harming for a while and it’s the only coping skill I’ve kept up with. 
My mom says to ‘forget’ about what he did and that he’s there but it’s not that easy. I don’t really know why I’m sharing this, but if you took the time to read it... thank you.",2.735592948717948,3.577837399038465,4.341076923076926,88.6372564102564,74.04807692307692,7.46974358974359,22.52051282051282,7.793537801064563,0.823602820512821,761,18,170,10,15,256,130,208,0.131,0.8109999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9052,0,0,0,0,2,2,29.0,3,2,0,2,9,9,2,0,6,0,11,4,1,2,0,25,24,16,2,4,5,7,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,1,13,8,2,1,4,1,0,6,5,5,0,0,7,2,26,4,21,15,3,24,1,1,0,0,28,8,0,2,12,102,39,1,0.0,0.24631439076474596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10157332941230347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262378575527535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976592476852828,0.0,0.0,0.19009074554662095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703558162066695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636113873908466,0.0,0.0,0.0920639447461387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757769590442446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19597918392144675,0.0,0.05255744531819676,0.07425794745870595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569006118655632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313388516852019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967178467264422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993795820231895,0.11127470095213897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499915125266287,0.0,0.05712516026884095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062902591945634,0.0,0.10156403154475983,0.0,0.0917848680504172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322599611165145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.608692512980214,0.0,0.22095303528863788,0.2292334280938844,0.15414700929893713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790544505008225,0.11060424072070207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826111842771512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206971520090878,0.0,0.0,0.10449289823634328,0.0,0.0,0.10397259509964604,0.0,0.06658948673048057,0.0,0.10263262046888708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266081158807627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843674774540177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401953370127792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369837520889693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956980991443286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606108541701356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548612661762833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10820985516564212,0.0,0.08977464508123273,0.0,0.0,0.06130913930301854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937937132639208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693682831236565
mentalhealth,Brosiago_Cheese,2020/04/03,"Me and my friend group I feel like I’m drifting apart from my friends.
For context I am a highschooler.
Of course we don’t hangout because of corona right now but we rarely do anyways. My friend group is basically partitioned into smaller sections of closer friends and I feel like im in none of them. Everyone has their place you know? Even my best friend of 10 years pretty much removed himself from the group. I always feel so fucking sad for no reason when I see my friends doing stuff without me. It’s stupid I know, but I can’t shake it. Sorry...I just had to get this out somewhere, probably gonna delete it in minutes.",2.576666666666668,4.855314838709682,3.2851612903225837,89.91440860215056,78.03225806451613,5.746236559139786,27.268817204301072,6.816661863887847,1.2451526881720425,496,21,98,5,12,156,86,124,0.071,0.655,0.27399999999999997,0.9842,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,2,1,2,1,6,13,2,1,2,0,8,1,0,1,0,16,18,6,0,0,4,0,3,2,6,1,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,6,1,0,3,5,4,0,0,1,4,20,9,15,16,4,15,0,1,1,1,15,9,1,0,5,65,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12732378358240976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327875515616052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058364366472744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106738208870966,0.0,0.0,0.14621588755207926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23211249729357825,0.2186331232322149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7093310250109925,0.1414632858969543,0.07994593448456144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652864114442399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681901080239631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14951437647151605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11248632199999736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987193183203288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15567498890195122,0.16497999670503213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732866818761376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067709996373406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193606100380255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17516975684721084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14750452821182938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853900043041992
mentalhealth,jnyzhng,2020/04/03,Looking for advice or to vent? I’m scared I’m going to do something to hurt myself. I’m stuck at home with my family during quarantine and I feel like I’m losing my mind. I’ve been away at college all year and haven’t been home for more than a night in a long time. I forgot how unbearable it is to live with my mom. Idk if it’s the typical Asian mom that’s always strict but deep down love you but she keeps yelling and screaming. For example she spent 20 minutes yelling at me to go to sleep while I was trying to finish an assignment. I’m frustrated because I’m a grown adult who really doesn’t need a bed time. I considered smashing my glass lamp and cutting myself to just make it stop. I don’t know what to do since I’m stuck here until August. I’ve been doing so much better mentally and emotionally away at college but I can feel myself regressing. I don’t know what to do.,1.832798092209856,3.728449729729729,3.5795230524642285,88.78184419713834,78.72972972972974,6.947535771065184,22.233704292527822,7.928766900206844,1.038259141494435,700,21,149,12,17,234,111,185,0.131,0.804,0.065,-0.7834,0,1,1,0,2,3,12.0,0,1,0,2,4,9,2,1,6,0,14,2,1,2,1,25,36,14,0,2,6,2,2,1,0,0,0,3,3,1,7,7,0,3,4,0,1,3,4,6,0,0,8,6,18,3,25,28,3,22,0,2,1,1,8,9,0,2,11,88,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525248306706402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13219815077037286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2985397994793905,0.0,0.0,0.09684976829034804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051353976279232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17871491547913976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14977482331880684,0.0,0.1606656774277818,0.11350155397221047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18058659217606748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187325899839896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17008080492507693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141216920542293,0.0,0.0,0.17462897059013366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776191357458625,0.0,0.1402910464317618,0.14060088953864858,0.13341642298707365,0.17774240034598812,0.0,0.0,0.14339243449788214,0.0,0.10605143818642486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16011035632982554,0.0,0.16042018729353374,0.3721489671010529,0.0,0.0,0.11679266305918018,0.11780506797152886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909503052378836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178048923752388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15906330382140824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13142445699700445,0.0,0.15899144970476276,0.0,0.0,0.12231105402172332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282804429399195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18528457549190944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786685772205627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231139280612904
mentalhealth,terrasaurjs,2020/04/03,"How to keep it together till I’m available to see a therapist? Any tips? I need help, asap. But in-person sessions are not a thing right now where I am. I can’t do them online because I need an evaluation first. 

Anyways, my mental health is awful. I’m having episodes constantly where I lose full control. I’m scared because when I get in these mindsets, I’m not thinking straight at all. It’s like fight or flight overcomes me. I’m not suicidal but when I have an episode, I’m so beyond irrational that suicide comes to my head as a way to escape it all. I don’t want to end up hurting myself or other when I’m freaking out. I just can’t control myself during these episodes. I need to keep it together just a little longer,,,",1.3985135135135138,3.72540067567568,3.08641891891892,89.40976351351354,82.7837837837838,5.591891891891892,25.466216216216218,6.9077264865688965,1.1491675675675683,572,24,115,7,16,189,90,148,0.183,0.752,0.065,-0.9579,0,0,0,0,1,2,20.0,0,0,1,4,12,6,1,1,6,1,9,2,1,3,2,23,26,11,2,4,9,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,0,1,16,1,13,26,3,21,0,2,1,0,3,11,0,2,9,75,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155353458804697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19999579473054704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14130683353648865,0.0,0.1772700910588751,0.3679719573000946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529167432049514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13953322755175027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570467453145543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835343617283302,0.1743679580243868,0.0,0.0,0.10995325342508804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17560932953100236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29161443286665106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014216767795325,0.16441222042207893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18351996727520106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16531478868786187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3649030649451752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432343115706428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009015459402854,0.0,0.0,0.16423370144190302,0.0,0.13071947297078265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35886855266026085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19046429462601228,0.10898158002137827,0.10511087680024353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09675565744056,0.13020814461592078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sammythebamsquam,2020/04/03,"Could I be a psychopath? I am a 17 year old female and have felt like I could be a psychopath. I have felt this way for the past year, and slowly feel myself becoming worse and worse. I do not really care for others, and if I get really angry I feel like I could seriously harm someone who is “close to me”. I don’t get that sad when people die, all I think is that its not me so I don’t care. I have crazy thoughts that people are NOT supposed to have. I know you guys aren’t therapist or doctors but if you could try and just give some advice with what it might be would be great. I have been to 3 psychiatrist over my lifetime about anxiety, but now its not just anxiety, its anger as well. Mood swings to where I can be happy one minute and wanting to hurt someone the next if one little thing goes wrong. I do not know what to do. I don’t want to one day just snap and something to happen where my whole life will be ruined. So I am coming here, for just a little advice of what is wrong with me.",3.985147648559973,3.9728921374407618,4.888815165876778,88.92095880422897,70.75355450236967,8.00889537003281,23.813707619394823,7.61054688173877,0.7818651841049946,775,16,179,8,13,253,110,211,0.20199999999999999,0.716,0.081,-0.9724,1,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,2,0,0,13,16,1,0,6,0,33,2,0,0,1,44,50,17,1,10,15,0,4,2,0,3,2,0,0,1,14,11,0,0,8,0,0,1,9,8,1,3,4,4,26,7,17,33,3,16,0,3,0,0,5,6,0,6,10,132,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22116626381905702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731412099098991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498140360115678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23075769198884125,0.0,0.0,0.09748127777967598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614108812996624,0.0,0.0,0.07298180150125361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744698258027525,0.0,0.0,0.11582875754152462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443883826743965,0.08084480883583448,0.2173115143644346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824765973345767,0.10855779059807028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12476436480914868,0.0,0.11205074014756224,0.1000710770776882,0.12046581500370893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12114503880871325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438460312194935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993149968466064,0.11057300929841588,0.22684130594716675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004975138373936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035182994658007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187472054671814,0.0,0.2300497736221436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802841017567656,0.15690816198251653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14499227380869095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19176798716896404,0.08711963347494484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13139281623456667,0.07518152809070408,0.07251130269212351,0.0,0.08984004732920567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768313312643887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349481951674871,0.08982478763989296,0.0,0.0,0.1017485608683052,0.0,0.0,0.12634422828369365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306487791882909,0.08038888099613213,0.24745543815596166,0.0,0.14574857706643585
mentalhealth,theonewithtwocats,2020/04/03,"I feel so insecure that I have nightmares (25/f) Hi everyone. When I like someone and I have seen them giving someone else more attention in a flirty or romantic way, I feel really insecure about it.

I dated a guy in university who used to like another friend of mine in Freshmen and Sophomore year. We started dating in Junior year and even though she was no more a part of our lives (due to a fallout we all had towards the end of Sophomore year), I had recurring nightmares. I would dream that we were in situations and he chose her over me. It drove me insane.

Now this is happening again. I like a guy at work and we initially hit it off, but then he started flirting with another colleague of ours. And even though we aren't even dating, it has affected me so much that I am having similar nightmares about it. I woke up in sweats last night and I don't know how to get out of this.

Background about me: My parents hate each other. My father is a terrible person who feels nothing for his wife or children. Basically I've grown up seeing a very fucked up couple first-handedly.",3.756379023307435,5.484710825471701,4.969755826859045,81.64339067702555,72.82075471698113,8.384461709211989,28.98002219755827,9.007467420416297,2.480082352941176,853,35,163,18,17,282,132,212,0.11900000000000001,0.8059999999999999,0.076,-0.9343,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,7,0,1,1,14,10,2,2,8,0,14,2,1,3,1,28,31,17,0,1,3,3,3,3,1,1,0,0,0,4,13,15,0,0,5,1,0,2,3,5,0,0,7,5,30,5,27,22,6,34,0,0,2,1,25,14,1,2,20,121,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2949233437626244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560321209046465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747740767240478,0.0,0.12455547177121483,0.0,0.0,0.2786522026392431,0.0,0.0,0.13437694828016544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133186041967548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961887745289004,0.0,0.0,0.10864954561050302,0.13000915954325762,0.07347280027702187,0.13490406296590735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27848945747633824,0.12435767906457923,0.0,0.0,0.13884193232949985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728597016901305,0.1146313296525342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20611254328054435,0.0,0.12417790235908725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337842847779323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319707038582364,0.0,0.13493723017602782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15615176021849786,0.1522874033658876,0.0,0.0,0.12279173830809073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900904795855592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206303252893032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807278490837806,0.0,0.0,0.23830883507633865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19907573003781076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763343765388941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145822452014038,0.0,0.11603357709463535,0.0,0.11162468157201773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10237952003322427,0.0,0.0,0.09989874152665207,0.0,0.0,0.2716812184934709
mentalhealth,snowsakura0813,2020/04/03,"Coronavirus Blues I’m having a really difficult time adjusting to being quarantined. For some background, I am a teacher so my routine has me around hundreds of people every day. I also am a very social person and like to spend time with people. Unfortunately for me, I broke my leg back in February and was forced to stay home from work for a couple weeks so I could have surgery and it could start to heal. Just when I thought I was almost ready to go back to work, my school shut down. So now I am working from home, which is ok, but it means I am away from people for even longer. So far it’s been 5 weeks and I’m going insane. It doesn’t help that I am going through withdrawal right now due to prescription opioids which makes it insanely difficult to sleep or that my leg is really uncomfortable, often with sharp shooting pains. I do currently live with my fiancé, but he is deemed essential and is often at work for long hours. When he is home, he is usually sleeping because of this so I feel alone all the time. To top off all this crazy bullshit, our wedding that I have been planning for years may have to be cancelled due to the coronavirus. I know I could have it a lot worse and I could literally be dying right now, but I just want the world to go back to normal. All of these issues and this stress is eating me from the inside. I really don’t know if my mental health will survive this virus, even if I do. Does anyone have advice on staying positive? 

(Side note: I cannot go very far because I am in an apartment upstairs. So walking around outside is not really possible. Also, my leg is broken and I can’t put weight on it yet so I couldn’t get up and go anywhere even if I wanted to.)",3.371491228070173,4.918563342105267,4.496783625730995,85.38359649122809,73.47368421052632,7.639766081871345,24.947368421052627,8.285830014693849,1.4892701754385964,1341,42,271,22,27,439,173,342,0.141,0.807,0.052000000000000005,-0.9872,1,2,1,1,0,0,33.0,1,0,0,7,27,7,0,1,10,1,42,10,5,1,3,48,60,27,1,11,10,0,3,1,0,2,3,0,3,1,17,14,2,0,6,0,1,8,6,5,0,0,5,4,34,2,42,45,5,53,0,1,1,0,8,20,0,10,24,192,51,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850168429861549,0.0,0.0,0.09069044453030528,0.09380079802653707,0.0,0.14485387473740796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332702450643267,0.0,0.0,0.16124886529792268,0.0,0.0,0.08509131242907034,0.20892285613009098,0.0,0.11041842872070384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892436772819514,0.10021141030572828,0.0,0.05840865821464063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399494836742713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925638314669678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267334227194793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17945728649252818,0.0,0.07630717275271949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045793737982259886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047317872400930085,0.0,0.3088301826855553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626920391116447,0.0,0.0,0.06070560379674419,0.0,0.27254028886215625,0.0,0.08919091688937958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09452912299147274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954725180069536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0442467914947572,0.0,0.07997291673501211,0.08014954281071844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699739897145925,0.0,0.0,0.060454626659560584,0.0,0.0,0.09865474943322912,0.0,0.0,0.09127091515000156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873709264261415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963703922179985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883646679542472,0.07908020088037601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10210144607245314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104552882796448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320798881488271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1546886000313534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165932277400696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18126616476558247,0.09232233970644214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410426686157711,0.1930661833208174,0.0,0.0,0.10374496627834996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190061783208483,0.15843221971372168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974749924817797,0.14945563458820674,0.10683832306393504,0.0,0.1452958526413194,0.11028702967382503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637373856521225,0.0,0.09229619873799356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058322613638123424
mentalhealth,sashaashi,2020/04/03,"Having a hard time. I don’t know where else to post this, hope it’s ok here. My husband, myself, and our son just moved across town and not even 2 weeks into living in the new place it burned down. We lost everything, and we are blue collar paycheck to paycheck people, no savings. My husband has been told to stay home from work for right now (he will get paid 75% of his pay), but he’s bipolar and I think not being on his set schedule is taking a toll on his mental health. On the flip side I’m working and the constant human interaction is giving me anxiety (fear of contracting COVID-19). We just got into an argument and it felt like we hadn’t argued like that in such a long time. I hated it. We just experienced a serious trauma, our poor son lost all his toys, books, and games, he’s not in school. Everything is just a big cluster fuck and I am trying so hard to keep it together. I’m just going to cry myself to sleep.",4.437698412698413,4.7822915661375704,5.3493253968254,84.76303571428572,69.84656084656085,8.204761904761906,26.332010582010582,8.07648339933343,1.422474074074075,722,20,152,9,12,237,124,189,0.2,0.736,0.064,-0.9802,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,7,0,0,4,11,13,3,1,9,1,12,4,1,0,1,31,30,10,0,1,9,4,3,2,0,1,2,0,1,1,7,15,0,1,3,3,3,2,6,8,0,0,8,5,20,5,20,20,1,29,0,2,1,1,24,16,1,1,10,93,27,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151465069640292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16265740221566144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165337887040863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573918360087505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994162797274432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705532706877725,0.0,0.0,0.16937555107227922,0.0,0.0,0.14452169887890726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915224982824562,0.07863988580225509,0.14439139471885665,0.08554333019914151,0.0,0.12038367314684095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696706463303769,0.1486062006863646,0.0,0.1599944971680336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15098267740522436,0.1494991788951586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337880682955403,0.0,0.0,0.0827212226196918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707181256084975,0.0,0.13291090068519204,0.13320444419673366,0.0,0.0,0.3286182069778309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168759667905854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15997771502601402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453720416339028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10435081732324136,0.0,0.1572601601734338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14415544942217204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285422740302376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523331103010089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506275512157006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604330651215828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317144162248925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964464003082153,0.0,0.0,0.17553750177265595,0.0,0.0,0.1438272098976011,0.0,0.10219241768143336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073714095215796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191590284716663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Coconut-Lubeeee,2020/04/03,"My mom So basically for as far back as I remember my mom has always had a bad temper, she would yell throw things around call me a bunch of stuff and just always try to put me down in any situation. Family outings she would throw the blame on me for doing something wrong, like spill liquid or outright just yell at me informer pf friend sand strangers, then she would be all happy again talking to friends. I’m now 16 and all of that stuff has really fucked with my brain so whenever I do something right or make a minor achievement my mom would praise me, in response I would get really angry and feel like anything I do that relates to her is meaningless. I don’t have a proper relationship with her and I’m just waiting for a time for her to abuse us in a physical sense so I can just beat her up. I’m barely holding it together.",4.737970779220781,5.396347375000005,5.4675541125541125,83.06532467532469,69.29761904761905,8.728138528138528,28.36796536796537,8.841846274778883,2.016338095238095,661,22,135,11,11,215,103,168,0.14800000000000002,0.7509999999999999,0.10099999999999999,-0.862,0,0,2,0,1,0,9.0,1,0,0,3,11,10,2,0,7,0,16,2,1,1,2,26,24,12,0,5,6,3,2,2,2,5,0,2,0,0,6,7,0,2,3,0,0,3,1,4,0,0,1,4,23,6,22,17,3,18,1,0,0,1,18,10,1,2,7,94,29,1,0.0,0.15099756754840132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21208339650637092,0.0,0.0,0.08666472183993587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048736551331336,0.11345012655140732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979947959061003,0.10640849094979768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226707760551235,0.1301322180462676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12014068674746176,0.0,0.06443834950094747,0.09104437140346272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969222727534208,0.11781779220595973,0.06658302496715947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13566405265290274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452314837191243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506832010846514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4477745139920144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281141017443853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632848245590729,0.0,0.0,0.1368246852514254,0.14436659562542908,0.1088345100425532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14324980325371614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19622168401023346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917804981290557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243280594564227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466659844628074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07431227642287848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08652454449192687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329666597209196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4526546134200575,0.13933748586768754,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chuninsupensa,2020/04/03,"Emotionally tumultuous and my husband is making it worse? My husband thinks I don't deserve him and has told me that he's not attracted to me anymore. The former of these he revealed to me today while I am still suffering extreme negative emotions from withdrawal of an antidepressant I was taking (which I stopped taking because it was contributing to me being less attractive). I asked him if his job (working with the mentally unstable) made him incapable of dealing with my issues, and he said yes. Having just finished my favorite show (yes, this did serve to make me even more depressed, thanks) where the message was ""depend on the ones you love when you can no longer help yourself,"" I'm sitting here crying and crying... am I right to be so torn up? He wasn't rude giving me any of this info, he simply was telling me the truth.",8.367692307692309,7.708957692307695,8.050897435897442,72.07326923076926,61.82051282051282,10.876923076923077,38.730769230769226,10.125756701596842,3.978476923076924,664,30,114,12,8,212,107,156,0.17300000000000001,0.723,0.10400000000000001,-0.9034,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,0,1,7,8,1,0,6,2,15,1,0,4,1,18,28,8,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,7,6,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,9,1,23,5,14,17,2,12,0,2,0,1,22,4,0,2,7,84,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685684501729275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17041874408596866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16064686288378685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475184706268392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775155420500326,0.0,0.17715911911901586,0.1480052265675054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3865929227206426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349845882761167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16484423691460784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151804856931838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17935593449928733,0.17052432330068687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15509198043135652,0.1625988183597145,0.22940858258695854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731739358336202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644298450375992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675011010899058,0.16345884458393095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723135517244808,0.1436656300488672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25840404092099284,0.0,0.15019541588056146,0.1582068493170966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010790007898086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16288388211445778,0.1642001360904572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12510130150658025,0.0,0.17511926961258348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,A_Reasonable_Zombie,2020/04/03,"One thing I learnt today / Never give in to your obsessions. I suffer from anorexia nervosa and mild anxiety and depression.
I have an intense fear of gaining weight and also I have been suffering from mild anxiety and depressive phases.
A few of my obsessions include frequent washing of hands, restricting my calorie intake and checking things againa and again (if the window is closed, what's my weight? Did I do that or that and so on)
But today, I decided to take a plunge and not listen and give in to my obsessions and OCD thoughts.
Yes, it was tough at first but I recited God's name again and again while stopping myself from going back into the obsessive hand washing and etc. 
I felt utter anxiety but later, I felt better and now a bit even more. 
I feel I can do and not give in to these things again with less anxiety and issues.
First time it sure will be tough but that's the thing I learnt today, it will be better with time and not giving in can make you feel better later on.
I wish my health improves soon enough and all the anxiety vanishes but since I didn't let the OCD take over me, I feel a bit better :)",5.459824675324676,6.076312450000002,5.878571428571429,80.90500000000003,67.68181818181819,9.194805194805195,28.89610389610389,9.23628265651192,2.342564935064935,889,29,170,16,14,286,117,220,0.147,0.693,0.161,0.9376,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,0,7,10,16,0,5,10,1,16,7,2,1,3,46,32,27,0,2,10,0,9,0,0,2,3,1,1,0,12,21,2,2,7,0,1,1,5,11,0,3,7,10,24,5,21,20,8,31,0,4,0,0,8,10,0,2,20,131,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088737196827045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38688662068845225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777594630958562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578258826215201,0.22085307100085708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17423585450965193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451208648226022,0.1128058548348125,0.0668067656054627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381871028370699,0.15342917645952306,0.0,0.1942343304009436,0.0,0.0,0.17207149770848476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3881184083280757,0.057484279490164734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751473400304816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055713883678534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342985556190296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751653530400134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801094909943425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853995422051239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367000148597031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845635806104959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533003033532517,0.0,0.1521001991712809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687907966575294,0.0,0.0,0.0802995712731236,0.11795948076155108,0.0,0.2876271302464887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24634005845336485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11631427769559828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coughsyrup-cosmonaut,2020/04/03,"i keep finding myself looking back at old messages In highschool i was involved in a pretty large friend group but i wasn't that close to any of them because i basically spent all of my junior and senior years on the cusp of an anxiety meltdown.  Things were shitty at home and i hadn't ever seen a psychologist or therapist despite showing signs of depression and anxiety since before age 10, and by the end of senior year i was having weekly panic attacks and just overall felt like shit.  That added onto the fact i was a closeted trans guy in a conservative christian school.  So all this basically meant i was an emotionally numb shell of a person who couldn't really get close with any of the people around me despite desperately wanting to.  

Now, almost two years post highschool, I've been in therapy for over a year and a half, have a laundry list of diagnosed disorders in my record, and i'm way closer to being out of the closet then i was back then.  Life isn't perfect, i'm still stuck living under the same roof as my emotionally abusive father, i'm still pre-transition and will be for awhile, and i'm still working on getting a job and doing all the usual young adult stuff that got delayed because i had a fucking mental breakdown after graduation.  But i'm so much better than i was.  Medication and a fantastic therapist has made so much of a difference.  I feel like a person after so long of feeling empty.  I'm actually able to be *happy*.

I've changed so much for the better but now all of the people i wish i had gotten to know in highschool don't recognize me anymore.  The shell that they knew finally became a person but now they just... don't know me anymore.  I haven't talked to some of them in months, and i'm not sure if i should.  I'm in two different group chats with these people and i see the messages but dont interact because i feel like a stranger.  To make matters worse, I've got a total of two friends at the moment, the one friend from highschool who was also closeted that i reconnected with, and my current partner who lives a nine hour drive away. 

I'm just.  I'm so lonely and it fucking sucks.  And these people that i wish i had connected with are right there, one message away, but i can't do it.  I'm a complete stranger to them now, and i think i'd just be hurting myself by trying to reconnect, especially since a lot of them are still stuck in a toxic conservative mindset that did a lot of damage on my mental health.  I've struggled with making new friendships, i have aquaintences from college classes and people i see regularly but nobody i can hang out with and share my interests with.  I know i need to try harder to make new friends, and i'm working on that, but friendships take time and i am so fucking tired of being lonely.  Lonely's been my constant state of being practically since i was in kindergarten and i am so sick of it.  I want people to care about and listen to, i want to be out of the closet and treated like a guy, i want to just hang out with friends doing random shit like an average college student.  And now i'm just rambling so i'll end it with this:

What do i do? Do i reach out to them and reintroduce myself? Do i risk coming out to them? I have a feeling it's a terrible idea but i'm also worried that if i don't take a chance and talk to them i'll regret it for the rest of my life.

TL;DR:  Had a mental breakdown after highschool and lost touch with a lot of people that I wish I'd gotten to know better.  Now after a lot of therapy and a lot of growth as a person, I have a chance to reach out and talk to them again, but I'm not sure if any of them would even want to reconnect because of how much I've changed since they last knew me.  Do I just let the chance go and possibly avoid a lot of hurt, or do I try to reconnect and potentially gain a few friends back?",4.871814671814676,5.270047558558558,5.932767052767055,80.77088803088805,68.9099099099099,8.60797940797941,29.88545688545689,8.542538833126315,2.1496090090090085,3031,109,604,44,49,1010,296,777,0.155,0.7120000000000001,0.133,-0.9778,3,7,0,0,0,1,63.0,0,0,12,8,38,44,7,4,52,0,57,13,2,5,10,137,123,63,0,16,24,1,6,5,7,3,8,1,5,8,26,53,0,5,15,2,1,6,12,22,0,7,32,11,70,22,106,79,19,89,1,9,4,3,43,34,6,14,51,424,96,17,0.05349264608399497,0.06338003842731485,0.05220110617101344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05356515805640335,0.0,0.0,0.08555609949402011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913050103433622,0.0,0.08184345567689039,0.0,0.10610066202507247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04761979611431202,0.0,0.06085560736966851,0.10051620373228773,0.12339762880381455,0.0,0.13043448220805184,0.0,0.045518301897929214,0.0,0.0,0.1419296952825559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054539317780609074,0.0,0.11317625337023385,0.046079178038777285,0.05608602167888736,0.057806546806123765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04607313768860272,0.054293909763900784,0.0,0.11177685965685276,0.06130720679777599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269298281800242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12034405386233875,0.09475721394375966,0.0,0.0,0.035331388237318094,0.04838716089475793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818995653697963,0.07643031410148418,0.051361329007747314,0.0585985790851327,0.04889130941977767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479697140214917,0.148359268006914,0.055895399502680417,0.0,0.0304011035080471,0.0,0.0855659114391773,0.0,0.0,0.10593225944998387,0.0,0.05694391644812478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0568601813583843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053657485546013656,0.0,0.05267948111974119,0.0,0.11452996798827635,0.060386686281570574,0.0,0.0,0.05308319718766789,0.04754672167807671,0.0,0.0,0.11759263733684736,0.04360364612682195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05469985485854024,0.07556687578922687,0.13066902429359029,0.0,0.09446997304574993,0.04733930846893103,0.04492035024337703,0.0,0.0583935422066497,0.27286520871291714,0.0,0.05061603512274868,0.10712026991481276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0538882132178324,0.16172401694410207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0426973197546324,0.0,0.157292999257922,0.039664119268424884,0.0,0.10332706184339698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0561315336335316,0.0,0.07249600277415376,0.0,0.0,0.06276209454510563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595954580965692,0.18683086101199906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06030492104193776,0.05123116821533893,0.054421252020828384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034268758838893534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045682427476879166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05413741367307915,0.08525342642541685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098188649904822,0.1769986784737309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708771850477851,0.0,0.0,0.05592212818565165,0.061236281762727024,0.0,0.0,0.10083237174940483,0.0,0.08043962522643837,0.1289860879706846,0.0,0.0,0.12234700545476232,0.1242181700977098,0.035538137137972214,0.034275927672243287,0.0,0.0,0.031191992108042056,0.061481927587423615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895398602457086,0.0,0.15676362731575144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058914592277405864,0.0,0.1577567430350509,0.0424599725837503,0.042908574061909316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845417091620304,0.0,0.0,0.0778865668869767,0.05432437869312928,0.0545135763641978,0.037999640999075615,0.0,0.0,0.1377900410111976
mentalhealth,nonstickgluestick,2020/04/03,Why am I crying when I have no reason to be sad? I recently got into the program of my dreams at a college I applied too. High school doesn’t really matter anymore so I don’t have to stress about grades. My gf finally said she loved me and life’s been pretty great. Recently though I’ve just been scared and unsure like there’s a void in my life that I can’t fill.,1.5321978021977998,3.2541463589743596,3.278791208791212,91.40192307692308,79.0,6.508424908424907,20.117216117216124,7.447530270364453,0.4612908424908424,288,7,64,4,7,96,60,78,0.187,0.605,0.207,0.4005,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,2,3,0,9,3,0,1,0,6,12,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,4,1,11,3,7,7,0,9,0,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,5,40,12,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21223112859082954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350696514622827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23442723797741916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711558590402411,0.23593645819618744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22610342283855064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30230995785946785,0.10454990183242356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314393037499047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177155828297666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13709428810287147,0.22002829697884732,0.4225996243600337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20356361179789345,0.0,0.2142519707268921,0.21658006997375934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24513700708207925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102545396818101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19310228956241832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cris_P_69,2020/04/03,"Thoughts What do you guys do to for forget/ignore bad memories? I overthink things A LOT and whenever a bad memory or thought comes to mind, I get really sad and upset with myself, wishing I could rewrite history and or just rewire my brain, if that makes sense. I feel like I under-appreciate myself more and more as I overthink. I don’t know how to deal with these thoughts and emotions because I usually like to keep to myself and not talk about my feelings to anybody.",3.718598901098902,5.892885406593408,4.666030219780222,81.8695947802198,74.05494505494505,7.626923076923077,28.957417582417587,8.472884824447931,2.3522846153846158,376,16,68,7,8,122,61,91,0.145,0.779,0.076,-0.8104,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,3,6,0,1,2,0,4,1,1,2,0,27,15,11,0,3,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,9,0,1,6,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,2,14,2,11,11,3,2,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,4,3,50,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33505261621061594,0.1223084926073893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22398098181306966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17283389211514685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16019498997788376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20685138657396174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256933837278881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20289957494813568,0.14333750322788116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482629962767066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986654871087852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17833835833664707,0.0,0.0,0.11026668692912064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19604547657985225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705772471497437,0.0,0.0,0.13392898891137592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025895532640378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12853534329750976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16126710994366866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13329653048300266,0.0,0.0,0.4778580687917372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22097699479604727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307264959255879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NintendoSwitchFan92,2020/04/03,"Any tips on how to stop focusing too much on breathing? Back when life was normal, I was a pretty busy guy. I would sleep well, work from 9 to 5, workout and watch NBA games. How I breathe wasn't something I thought about in years. 

Now that everything is either closed and cancelled, I have too much time in hand. I have started to constantly focus  on how I breathe. My once under-control anxiety attacks came back years later since 3 weeks (when the lockdown in my town  started)  and it  manifests itself as a scary coronavirus symptom where I feel like I run out of breath/lightheaded for a couple of minutes. 

I know for a fact that this is anxiety- related because when I watch movies or play  video games , these thoughts are non-existant unless I multitask by focusing on breathing again . Surely, I can't watch movies or play games the whole day. 

What can I do to stop focusing too much  on breathing? Also, do you guys know any breathing techniques and or tricks  that would lighten the panic attacks?",6.345673758865246,7.206185553191488,5.83489361702128,81.13333333333334,65.80851063829788,9.032624113475178,34.28368794326241,9.075114841892004,2.9750517730496457,796,35,145,13,12,244,117,188,0.128,0.773,0.099,-0.5329999999999999,0,1,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,1,17,9,3,1,7,0,14,10,8,3,2,27,22,16,0,3,5,0,2,1,0,2,2,0,0,2,8,7,0,2,5,7,0,2,2,4,1,0,6,5,17,5,22,14,5,32,0,0,3,0,6,12,0,3,19,96,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908645198908784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855259762429802,0.0,0.20870545177067493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31037049752657875,0.0,0.20978063266376384,0.0,0.08315383102583282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15601587655383356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474099714716874,0.1529946067156156,0.0,0.15093427385206892,0.0,0.08797270078731273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225958652062384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897263064392985,0.09745081693824996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27013326701257445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993394583179664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634990861549296,0.0666426839435801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30082954891430425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365213203661633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14527143135782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004689914148754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387772778531373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283916608894827,0.0,0.13650779322122145,0.0,0.0,0.10501452815274816,0.0,0.0,0.19310238105726596,0.0,0.0,0.22808853228439155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128564132128956,0.14178147217377596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21658746262311607,0.07954134818349826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941929639164644,0.0,0.12264832487936513,0.0,0.0,0.1522960897425147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930758051803086,0.0,0.0,0.19380247757732166,0.0,0.0,0.17568620802299473
mentalhealth,thefacelesstheone,2020/04/03,"Don't let the fear of your own mentalhealth stop you from feeling Me, 29, have been seeing mental health professionals from psychiatrists, psychologists, and counselors since I was 11. A total of 11 in patient stays, with at least 10 different diagnoses and over 60 different medications. In all this time I spent my whole life trying to mask my mental health and instability with a face that I felt was 'normal.' It brought me to a point where I became unable to cry, empathize, sympathize, and experience happiness - among other things. When I stopped trying to mask myself for others, I began to feel. Emotions are strong. Some hurt and some heal. You take the good with the bad because one is not without the other. A mask is needed at times, but don't forget to take the mask off. Don't let it define you. Feeling is a necessity. Feeling is wonderful. Godspeed and best wishes to every single one of you and don't forget to feel!",5.449338103756709,7.259981465116283,5.9665116279069785,75.85111806797855,68.65116279069767,8.548121645796064,28.34704830053667,9.057496981413335,2.4582892665474065,740,26,127,14,13,239,106,172,0.053,0.78,0.16699999999999998,0.961,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,5,0,2,2,7,0,1,10,0,15,7,1,0,2,31,30,9,0,3,3,0,6,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,8,10,0,2,7,0,1,1,6,3,0,2,7,7,16,4,25,21,9,17,0,1,1,0,5,9,0,3,6,96,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999837242828538,0.0803081932212862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13825422800738765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471148693373612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371451236655454,0.0,0.2752829617147662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14819108209735307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11099761597035704,0.0,0.0,0.12886814142939298,0.0,0.14824544019866864,0.3330614645410829,0.0,0.1264921810316076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049824128148032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140240923028266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800694021289789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14103164505470686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694285399867849,0.09305268299114762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271536686271762,0.2655282229342422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768440676844796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907837331871075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17854244981848036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453798624663613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498065429091634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897765552599573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041855634300712,0.0,0.2202830308150681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19810592585566708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08752297814771129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363866896325004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17888721067759514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14708430929765115,0.1514958415483159,0.1269937847350004,0.142867676968756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kdmj11,2020/04/03,"Tw: rape. My rape ruined my life.  Tw: rape, depression, PTSD

I’m a 26 year old female and my only sexual interaction was a rape. Went to the hospital, had a rape kit, and went to court. He didn’t get charged but did have to go to therapy and anger management. I had to be escorted to class due to death threats. I was not allowed to be alone in my residence. I had constant flashbacks and would disassociate during lectures. Cutting was the only thing that made me feel human. I hardly graduated college. 

That was six years ago. I want so badly to have a relationship or even just have sex but get uncomfortable when people look at me. I put on weight and when I lose it, I feel nervous when people compliment me. I want someone to be with me but at the same title I’m too insecure with my body. I don’t understand my feelings or how to control them. If my feelings are all valid, why do they change so much day to day? 

I don’t drink. I don’t smoke. I hate not being in control of my body. I can’t even go dance because I’m uncomfortable being around so many people who might try to touch me. I dated someone for four months, but he was too pushy on sex and said he loved me within a month and scared me. Now when I am on a dating site or meeting someone new, I get sad knowing I have nothing to offer them. I’m inexperienced and overweight. (30 pounds) I am terrified of everything. I can’t sleep next to anyone, even my best friend since middle school. 

Now I have realized this has been going on for a long time. I go to therapy. It’s not helping. I am maxed out on my antidepressants. I’m not sure what my next steps should be. All I know is that I’m tired of being tired. 

Others have gone through so much worse and came out fine. I’m at the point where I don’t know that I will ever be okay, and that makes me mad, considering it was only this one event. 

Thank you for listening.",1.3825521456091394,3.5105896373057,3.2492746113989632,89.39532018068287,81.38341968911917,6.446020991098712,21.814534343031763,7.61054688173877,0.8431414374916972,1464,46,317,24,39,490,195,386,0.245,0.6859999999999999,0.07,-0.9974,1,1,2,0,0,0,49.0,0,1,3,4,20,26,10,3,11,1,43,17,3,6,4,54,79,27,1,5,13,0,7,0,1,4,4,2,0,1,14,16,3,2,9,2,0,11,11,18,0,3,18,10,49,8,39,49,6,54,0,4,1,8,18,18,0,5,25,206,63,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259626337522974,0.0,0.0,0.09650382609667983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515189943757216,0.0,0.0,0.08294776154567095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779935026990954,0.0568001609118337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09778407510579523,0.0,0.0,0.2069984735516762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657027804654627,0.0,0.0,0.09856947785592407,0.0,0.0,0.10069181415104624,0.20901305863803152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018360426510287,0.0,0.08025367495234806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127851191438972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846286506278708,0.08428441554297447,0.0,0.0,0.08374196095278552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18845344685902046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07198873293447068,0.0,0.14604424990560466,0.0,0.21181976323101973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346877004186025,0.09199352588556067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06245493807246263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15362381043057147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658140490424345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824591869564451,0.07824566261458239,0.1042418285425452,0.0,0.0,0.08409636385088776,0.0881668372050677,0.06219672860611933,0.0944673963935288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884664063944412,0.0,0.0,0.14874684003874095,0.0,0.13699241974839366,0.0,0.0,0.08999144459193692,0.19819073255724287,0.0,0.0,0.08940635850317102,0.0,0.0977741495543204,0.0,0.06313950963470734,0.21259714389030213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1937927132973092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808288886481529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891955295555728,0.0936691591729148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003780260795074,0.0,0.0,0.08863317387877485,0.0,0.09328696817464956,0.09430064062589052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707742038990681,0.0,0.09324482738836078,0.0,0.23684707084375906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781872467362742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578535606334417,0.21311326512039488,0.0,0.06190301441067941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05433257037265461,0.2141877406046723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326143039701279,0.0,0.0,0.09700110073187013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991704938913212,0.0,0.0,0.11346513629181648,0.0,0.17275301817422256,0.08407823311844219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495586924405568,0.0661906479575435,0.0,0.0,0.12000655607311565
mentalhealth,privatekittensoul,2020/04/03,"Cluster B Personality Disorders https://medium.com/@karincho/cluster-b-personality-disorders-749576395201

Quick breakdown of the four Cluster B Personality Disorders",32.04047619047619,41.69744685714287,22.472857142857148,-57.74452380952377,44.714285714285715,16.152380952380952,61.80952380952381,10.504223727775694,12.825980952380956,152,8,6,5,3,43,10,14,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7954475913464132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6060223835974953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Turbulent_Gift,2020/04/03,"Bipolar 1 Hi Everyone,

I am currently going through a really difficult time, having recently gone through a manic episode which turned into a traumatic pyschotic episode which has followed with a very debilitating depression. The past 2 years have been horrific.. I feel like my sense of self has dissolved. I have recently been discharged from hospital and I am feeling completely like my sense of self has gone. I have no confidence, feel like I'm never going to be that bubbly and easy going person I once was. I regret a lot of my choices throughout life.. the paths I have taken and mourn for the person I feel I have no chance of being ever again. I don't know what to with myself or my life, I don't really have anything left, have drifted away from social circles and friends, I don't have the confidence to meet new people or socialise anymore (used to come to me with ease) I feel like such a boring person now and am losing hope. I just want myself back.. I am feeling really over life and don't see much point.",6.307923076923077,6.862742933333338,6.722884615384616,75.8058653846154,65.82051282051282,9.782051282051283,32.66025641025641,9.725611199111238,3.1433333333333326,812,32,144,16,12,264,108,195,0.126,0.716,0.158,0.5313,2,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,6,12,0,0,10,0,25,4,0,1,2,28,46,8,1,3,3,0,6,4,1,0,4,0,0,5,4,11,0,0,7,0,0,8,7,6,0,0,6,7,23,6,20,38,2,25,0,4,1,0,9,5,0,4,16,101,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12099230874167992,0.0,0.0,0.10039651031113997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114624049684484,0.09381131538836343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10509314512124544,0.12791583240943225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507936884691726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11035697984105756,0.0,0.11657727949960987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701245319556401,0.2614728311159384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942577473908208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20800811030929425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12117462040340793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06704861407484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325545523561449,0.0,0.25851895525327856,0.2384143002096349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364880244699465,0.0,0.10372097260384222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968484628598304,0.0,0.0940947696165882,0.11782942282652925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299271900459043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646385486933795,0.08458020151934506,0.3195799647229708,0.0,0.0,0.11533047394556907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344710864471204,0.0,0.2409227362837316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972190813372362,0.0,0.2545475099551869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243647577103736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113982264337694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327021635382285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053697793306766,0.0,0.10066368466783716,0.0719594098474833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856470857653995
mentalhealth,tiny-giraffe,2020/04/03,"Is it possible to have body dysmorphia over a body part that is deformed? 22 M. I have a tarsal coalition in my left foot which has resulted in an extremely rigid flat foot deformity. It causes me a lot of pain to walk around on it and I have to wear a brace for it for daily activities like long walks or prolonged standing. Thankfully, my right foot is normal and is pain-free. Lately, I’ve been focusing a lot on this defect and I it feels crushing to me. I can’t run at all and it’s painful to walk around. I know that in the future and when I get older, people will probably have to take care of me as it gets arthritic and worse. Every time I look at it, I feel those feelings of not wanting dependency on others and the feeling of inadequacy. I feel like I have body dysmorphia because I’m very fixated on its appearance, but is it possible to have body dysmorphia over something that is already malformed?",4.925644567219155,5.7245270110497275,6.004102209944751,78.88121777163906,68.94475138121547,9.56924493554328,31.65791896869245,9.725611199111238,2.941739963167588,723,30,142,16,12,241,105,181,0.078,0.871,0.051,-0.562,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,1,8,0,16,10,8,3,1,28,31,11,0,2,3,0,5,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,17,9,0,1,6,0,0,5,2,4,0,0,1,6,15,4,27,29,4,27,0,0,1,0,0,15,0,5,8,98,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423742012857198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165782892977353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415318661340695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5404772166682331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12402438805108397,0.12496212097077222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249050066427756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075348596848185,0.08690265409186099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271081671039081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06685248128553266,0.0,0.13721997705900002,0.0,0.1321667994629982,0.0,0.0,0.11885844146738997,0.0,0.0,0.10765130556341736,0.10215050676625792,0.0,0.0,0.2068351292742856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191855067400565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3883140755185478,0.0,0.0,0.1317288346290597,0.0,0.08433278475953479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27427115824153026,0.0,0.0,0.131153041897553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10388349805362544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364766249687798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146131359672596,0.0,0.0,0.11199365309434224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093172211753608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036921997936768,0.0717489118384634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396585113592087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bennettvictoriarose,2020/04/03,"“stop me if i’ve said this before” situation occur far too often for me, why is that? my diagnosed disorders/illnesses (to help find the cause of my issue easier):

non specific adhd symptoms

persistent depressive disorder

generalized anxiety disorder

skin picking disorder

high functioning autism

sensory processing disorder


alrighty, so i’m sure all of you have those moments where you’re telling a story or a fun fact when you’re told you’ve said this before. this happens super often for me and it’s humiliating and embarrassing. what is the possible cause for this? and how can i help it?

DISCLAIMER: i can’t see my psychiatrist due to the pandemic, not even over the computer, so that’s why i’m here.",5.981015624999998,8.1173375703125,7.378562500000001,64.96018750000002,67.828125,12.3075,35.45625,11.792908689023552,5.3814100000000025,571,29,90,23,10,195,87,128,0.16399999999999998,0.726,0.11,-0.6664,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,2,10,5,0,1,6,0,5,3,1,4,3,18,12,9,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,10,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,4,9,3,8,9,1,8,0,1,1,0,7,4,0,4,4,55,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16605180714000506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569860092300216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23514260424174466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28387442527265955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190044128401392,0.14023822071590422,0.0,0.0,0.6334127445062739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125905729335958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628359739270584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218203679498267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18522300040948367,0.1459827120304447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442121212168616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15576433644418464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628599580483874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010248556260666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15530729559475942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155151364974007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302222704737225,0.1436100793575663,0.0,0.0,0.12076544654991908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320260185190375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493513417507073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Infamous-Yoghurt,2020/04/03,"Mental health & relationship Hello everyone, I'm at a loss of what to do.. My boyfriend of 7 years sees a phycologist and has been since I met him. He used to be very sweet and caring. Here's the problem we moved out of state 4 years ago and he no longer could see the Dr he was well established with, so we've been trying to save money for years now to move back, but a few months into living where we live now, he's been doing drugs and recently almost 2 years ago he's been going through this thing where he believes now just randomly that I have other woman come and take my place that look just like me, to make him go crazy, he believes none of my photos are the same on Facebook and that I look different in them all, or if my attitude changes even the slightest or if I can't remember something right away he starts to believe I'm an imposter. I don't know what to do, he won't address it with his Dr now and won't let me address it to his Dr either. What do I do? 
 
Please and thank you",6.586714285714287,4.657723766666667,6.872380952380954,83.19428571428574,66.0952380952381,10.114285714285714,31.47619047619048,8.548686976883017,2.068104761904762,781,22,177,9,10,254,129,210,0.04,0.873,0.086,0.8511,1,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,2,1,1,1,13,8,0,0,8,0,20,5,0,2,1,34,37,14,0,4,8,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,2,1,11,15,0,0,2,0,1,5,6,2,1,0,6,5,20,6,22,26,5,30,0,1,4,0,21,10,0,6,15,113,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199626791325921,0.0,0.12423905353592875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13443073497662067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656866580673847,0.0954028400017082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4193561480064984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649852007200615,0.0,0.13125052843729484,0.10687606785782423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906049334324586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296276512090458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388281841513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08194763898750611,0.0,0.0,0.11855503249147782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102466839770894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13188153217821866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818610499636693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268708698483027,0.0,0.060614759645083324,0.0,0.21911370123112348,0.0,0.20837656421597864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281826863845511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12503425440598714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903218411585188,0.2637353977223723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296276512090458,0.13619255663397606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871906571814038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225050153454178,0.1332056813285656,0.14054810866937814,0.10595584441242398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977368385366418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263270514170417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955158166890406,0.0,0.0,0.08781799983167568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328585285227996,0.0,0.0,0.11422778694184516,0.0,0.0,0.0824271724878052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423597598278293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715739521276113,0.0,0.10237146086898732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155461175196232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3195902878487175
mentalhealth,alyxander100,2020/04/03,"My kids are my anchor Over the last few days I have had some sincere thoughts about killing myself. I'm depressed, my marriage is falling apart, I cant make money at my job because no one is buying anything, bills are stacking up and bank account is running low. I'm at a new low and I dont see the point in going on.

I wont kill myself for 3 very important reasons: my kids. I would rather be miserable and hate life every day than abandon them and ever have them wonder if they were the reason I chose to kick it. I cant do that to them, but i cant live with myself.

I need help. Possibly medical, but we dont have health insurance yet...hasnt kicked in from my job. I feel hopeless, I feel trapped and worst of all, I feel like a failure. I've never felt this small.",2.2565934065934066,3.6496075403726738,3.6785093167701888,90.74784519827999,76.0807453416149,6.196082178690874,25.42809364548495,6.67199483983844,0.8480058289536547,598,21,130,5,13,197,107,161,0.21600000000000005,0.7090000000000001,0.075,-0.9697,2,1,0,0,0,3,21.0,1,0,4,0,3,12,3,1,5,0,19,3,0,3,3,27,32,8,2,4,4,0,4,1,0,2,3,0,0,2,3,7,0,1,8,0,5,3,8,10,0,1,4,5,26,2,15,25,4,21,0,6,1,0,9,12,0,3,7,85,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679691608240898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939273709454238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19874116196411148,0.0,0.13271118560180342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611675043676809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937660451194014,0.1298213025485178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23372649643387444,0.11007669663048962,0.1479435351846809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875687372851561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15212474562955516,0.0,0.16378268249508476,0.0,0.0,0.1032783717780543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3058065670249502,0.0,0.34093931002449385,0.0,0.0,0.1255979484870964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883315290997987,0.0752770139192104,0.0,0.13605782844016354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10285138467207597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552220887241726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425035406837825,0.11883806090363967,0.14881401148179482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044104109489548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456579355328265,0.1737050691704565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31684531279321065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227839459730566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232443588563932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271343469789662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670960925964212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945591427947657,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayaccount4175,2020/04/03,"My sister has the worst case of OCD and depression I've ever seen or heard of and my family is in need of help Okay, so I'm not entirely sure how to start this but my thirteen-year-old sister has what the psychiatrist at her school is saying is the worst case of depression and OCD she has ever seen in her twenty years at her job.  Her problems started out a few years ago as not wanting to spend time with our family as much and being protective of certain possessions. We initially dismissed this as normal teenage girl behavior but it only got worse. What it has evolved to lately is her being in a complete state of insanity. Whenever she does anything with our family she gets provoked by pretty much any comment about herself and goes into yelling a ritual like set of phrases until we leave.  Sometimes this continues and she follows us around continuing the rituals. She spends the entire day (literally 17 hours) either on the couch or in her room and refusing to pretty much anything else.  My parents monitor her screen use and there are some nights where she does not sleep.  They've tried taking away / limiting her screen use but when they take it away she relentlessly harasses them until they give it back. She has been on medication for the past few weeks but prior to this, the rituals would go to the extent of her going into screaming fits in her room yelling at absolutely no one late into the night. Also, she refuses to wear any other clothes besides one outfit and has a behavior of switching it to inside out and backward in the evenings.  She only wears one pair of really beat up shoes and hides them, along with her other possessions, in random spaces throughout the house.  If any of us go near one of her possessions she absolutely freaks out. The one slightly weird thing about this is she is able to function fairly normally at school and attended sports practices until the recent covid-19 events.  

The one (slightly) positive side of this is that she has shown fairly little evidence of any form of self-harm.  However, being forced to live with her has basically ruined the lives of the rest of my family.  My nine-year-old brother is emotionally scarred from being tortured any yelled at by her every day and my parents have gotten to the point where they are so fed up with her illness that they completely ignore it. I had never seen my dad cry until one day where he sat down after arguing with her and realized she mentally was no longer there.  

I am making this post as a genuine ask for help.  My family has no idea how to solve her situation.  We've been matched with a psychiatric doctor but the appointments were doing very little and are no longer possible due to covid 19.  We have tried to get appointments with psychiatric doctors, but since there are so little in the area (we live in Southern Maine) the estimated wait times are over six months for an appointment.  The only available doctors are multiple hours away in Massachusetts but making regular appointments there is not feasible for my family.  Also, being in this current situation where we have a stay-at-home order has caused her behavior to get to the point where it's impacting my mental health as well in the few weeks I've been home (I'm a current college student).",9.395620462794916,8.18350127302632,8.908591197822144,68.5342763157895,60.118421052631575,12.465154264972774,37.57735934664247,11.48208654003052,4.332572640653358,2626,101,451,62,29,841,289,608,0.138,0.815,0.046,-0.9962,6,0,0,0,2,0,49.0,9,0,6,2,25,18,3,0,33,1,42,11,4,8,5,79,72,42,0,7,15,6,0,1,0,1,6,6,4,1,22,36,1,6,2,1,2,5,9,13,1,8,14,11,61,5,95,52,14,98,3,3,5,0,66,51,0,5,39,330,83,8,0.0632781370883008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056092250544461854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012070067355058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151565155991237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414503035393748,0.05633095775271337,0.05915651625694818,0.0,0.17835567835006574,0.04865698149460399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650040775547638,0.0,0.0,0.13269184564028935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950806227908995,0.122427490656853,0.0,0.1090027335035818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19430356390238346,0.1107502483796258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05286076386407127,0.07117938721993211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041794612756498435,0.11447739547617054,0.053314559660567334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3579179762212061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918064475952924,0.060702155061425664,0.10788727065756837,0.0,0.050609306797347535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726170070577257,0.0,0.0,0.08482800288880935,0.0,0.06347313088350026,0.0,0.1246324372438517,0.07301447431458534,0.0,0.0714333145313731,0.0,0.0,0.06279378708340938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276098967450207,0.06700241053479594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030914501479179023,0.1902639513766871,0.16762726307454895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447729573845601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06374606591880372,0.1275389580166543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05050800531523949,0.0,0.1395501349070128,0.04691993685661136,0.0488040002959096,0.0,0.0,0.11876449015761148,0.12399827825180006,0.0,0.0,0.1327995206915707,0.0,0.30015232339464554,0.14437762403314855,0.0,0.0,0.14052576554782134,0.0,0.0604061419212393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963658569975752,0.07133659185225158,0.060602963637911476,0.12875322863945196,0.0,0.0605486312944227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040537594948069515,0.0,0.06247952644335791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05032131441106757,0.0,0.12808170598373625,0.0,0.0,0.06601289743200521,0.0,0.0,0.052344328897668366,0.14225455467452694,0.06332383580213605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06258369559810521,0.0,0.08957718224376698,0.06744607471208472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05963889533973149,0.0,0.0951545680581514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04203918254760401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07379598121097378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592340279389561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15223161537140847,0.10930398708851703,0.0,0.05221109012046922,0.037323084734679365,0.0,0.10151580938769028,0.0,0.0568946446411425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448582769547008,0.04495097304908166,0.0,0.0,0.16299618251858938
mentalhealth,Daily_Dilemma,2020/04/03,"I’ve been sober for almost a year and I haven’t touched a cigarette in months Ever since I graduated college, I thought that my addiction and depression would get worse, but surprisingly it hasn’t. 

I have two jobs that I look forward to everyday, at least before the quarantining began. I had kept busy going on runs and bike rides at least five days a week. Everything seemed settled and I finally had a consistent routine with steady habits. 

But now that the lockdown has been extended for another month, I’m starting to get antsy. It’s hard to fill the time when the days are so long. I’m trying my hardest not to pour a shot or light a cig, but my resistance is slowly diminishing. 

Does anyone have any advice for how to fill the time? 

It’s difficult for me to fill the time when the days are so long",4.860109321058687,5.993654297468352,5.545995397008056,80.88375719217494,69.31645569620252,9.542922899884926,29.553509781357878,9.800150414767053,2.7053341772151898,641,24,127,15,11,208,98,158,0.064,0.917,0.019,-0.6652,1,1,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,13,0,13,1,0,1,1,17,24,13,0,1,5,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,2,1,0,7,3,2,0,2,7,4,11,1,15,16,2,31,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,3,21,78,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888933914166815,0.0,0.16932059015103895,0.0,0.0,0.17350810564372018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783173484076727,0.18169208445839916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115666777322825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1474427523598901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352406869048025,0.0,0.14923997485444015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15163256692783064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673555215662646,0.0,0.0,0.1557268019723197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898123485376267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18105621702258104,0.0,0.09847516689123888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552187753342728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17194693938634378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30668270319594604,0.14550586908329022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27661007025834194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774143641798735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14333340233534375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264368053808583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13755958589980607,0.30311103289687424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764114587041567,0.0,0.16926276331064072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13898932947263384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17658021949373365,0.12308832763918025,0.0,0.0,0.11158227596028446
mentalhealth,nonamenono0,2020/04/03,"Struggling to support my schizophrenic brother So the title pretty much sums up why I need help right now. My brother was diagnosed with schizophrenia a few years ago after multiple hospitalizations. He attempted suicide last year and was hospitalized for about a month. He has since gotten treatment and is currently living in a group home near my parents. I live in another state and talk with him nearly every day because he has only a small number of people who have continued to reach out to him. He was getting better but then COVID happened. Quarantine has left him extremely isolated...he isn’t able to leave his house at all. Things got bad this weekend for him and he ended up getting hospitalized again for hallucinations and paranoia. The state he lives in has a notoriously fucked up mental health system and they basically had him sit in the ER for 4 hours and then released him with no way to get home. My 60 year old father had to pick him up from the hospital yesterday and according to my brother he said it was the scariest experience he has ever went through in his entire life. I am just starting to recover from the grief of his last suicide attempt so the news of this completely wrecked me. To complicate things further, he has been relying on my parents to bring cigarettes, food, necessities, etc to him. I have offered to have an arrangement made to send things to his home but he has refused. He is also not participating in any group activities right now due to quarantine. And because of the nature of his mental illness, he is afraid to talk to a therapist. 

Multiple family members, including myself, have been diagnosed with PTSD from previous events in our lives and this whole situation is completely overwhelming our ability to cope. I love my brother so much and I hate to see him suffering. I just feel so helpless and let down by the mental health system. I am desperate for some guidance.",7.050724223602487,8.311028745714289,7.269354037267082,70.04877639751554,64.4,10.886956521739132,36.07453416149068,10.848893137575418,4.314090683229814,1551,73,255,42,23,502,192,350,0.147,0.8029999999999999,0.05,-0.9921,3,2,1,0,0,2,29.0,2,0,1,3,12,12,2,3,16,0,27,10,0,2,2,31,45,21,3,1,5,7,1,0,0,0,7,1,3,0,8,17,1,1,1,1,0,3,3,9,1,0,13,3,34,3,57,31,7,56,0,4,1,2,47,22,1,1,25,178,42,0,0.09246153437548084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196157141411373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394145563463975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06287701401644173,0.09695398066238713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720151908265553,0.1127273863167169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177471334822092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19388831927676886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059630040520295,0.0,0.0,0.1876930221822092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189347541929826,0.0,0.10311905193146616,0.0,0.08363675136536558,0.07790283054462065,0.0,0.0,0.09044512259664453,0.08716450574337499,0.0,0.0467513299385032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118048543826171,0.0,0.0,0.08547919862481647,0.14492200650627304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394993556198358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176342948933114,0.0,0.0,0.09128662282520028,0.0,0.19656457468972865,0.0,0.0,0.061975017486388284,0.0,0.27823937349394,0.0,0.0910559864020785,0.1066881965460684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507369823852376,0.0,0.09790341451200066,0.10045972763775828,0.09454818335954364,0.06530831614183145,0.0,0.0,0.3265809153095466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08345014471319184,0.08748933945245313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27953843839652504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380191460401589,0.0,0.13593973305295395,0.06855905616357104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097022826622856,0.0,0.0,0.07032116336886346,0.0,0.0,0.20533518367820133,0.0,0.0,0.06410118594305839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406662098149728,0.0,0.0,0.10808258573882998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579232903108398,0.08795209266940471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367987186204747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648513670653011,0.1039306386244682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544474992787104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09666087128067376,0.0,0.2022758229849688,0.1049242534905408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14863415790067624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735496788207266,0.18428200486457053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07339166225708617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571276869854433,0.08343215330218362,0.1032300011384707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17862659000198058
mentalhealth,Thesadguy94,2020/04/03,"Being ok for someone else. So my best friend has pretty severe mental health issues, same as me. I try my best to be there for her. But I'm finding it extremely hard to be ok enough in my self to give her the help she needs/deserves. She is the literal world to me, but I don't know how to help when I'm in the state I'm in?",0.7189497716894948,1.8232948904109565,2.8947260273972617,95.97898401826487,79.54794520547945,5.962557077625571,19.015981735159816,6.42735559955562,-0.2442949771689497,249,5,63,2,6,85,48,73,0.040999999999999995,0.722,0.237,0.9226,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,3,2,6,1,0,1,0,6,11,6,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,11,5,11,8,4,6,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,1,42,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4785254602248834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904574176035068,0.0,0.0,0.2355758866533259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20837985395739533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17614545886537816,0.0,0.0,0.21870996275603846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20423536018248312,0.0,0.0,0.2423440163101488,0.0,0.0,0.3056354314555514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379636103064606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12529801761049172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22976153589225876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319490454001097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378445760972125,0.2575651949578944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19317622945556767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547910795416465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fiamondrocks1,2020/04/03,"What is this? My thoughts recycle, I’m in my headspace talking and I have no one around to tell me stop and you can sometimes hear me talking to myself in a completely different way than words, just breathing in type of things. I’m in my headspace completely. Before this I never paid attention to my subconscious on repeat it wasn’t apparent. 

But how in the word do I explain what’s around me recycling me being on repeat?",2.5973848238482367,5.2599761097560975,3.6486991869918697,85.13112466124663,80.58536585365854,7.546883468834688,28.62330623306233,8.515128840125781,2.5545972899729,339,16,63,8,9,109,56,82,0.062,0.938,0.0,-0.5803,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,6,1,1,1,1,14,12,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,1,3,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,3,1,13,0,14,8,0,14,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,0,4,49,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41468019773580256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981900383017205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48840533680960996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433423389377967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26250753439808944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17963526008068914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15782646723893734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23035485549160106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947239582607632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3744099501283908,0.20357441012813085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547356660259537,0.0,0.0,0.18490525415386852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18487384726112355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drugs4ry,2020/04/03,I can’t stop (eating disorder) I’ve been dealing with anorexia b/p sub type for 5 years (officially diagnosed at 12 but was struggling before then) I won’t eat for the majority of the day an then when I do eat I binge an then purge. Lately with this corona I’ve been getting less hours at work so I’ve had a lot more free time on my hands an I’ve fell back into this cycle of binging an purging everyday multiple times a day. Me an my mom are constantly arguing because I’m eating all the food in the house but I feel like I can’t control it!! My mom wants to send me back to treatment but I just got out of a terrible place in November after being there for a year an 3 months!! I don’t know what to do I can’t do this anymore.,2.145105485232065,3.1641815063291148,4.407025316455698,86.91766877637129,75.70886075949367,7.79831223628692,25.824894514767927,8.344100000000001,1.5231122362869196,570,20,129,10,12,199,98,158,0.098,0.847,0.055,-0.7564,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,6,5,1,1,14,0,14,7,1,1,1,15,20,8,0,1,4,2,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,4,5,2,2,0,1,2,5,3,0,0,5,2,14,3,19,13,5,29,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,1,20,82,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085195598496167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184189623851897,0.0,0.08657793267372986,0.0,0.12085394630096215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15348000721154234,0.1592946061084464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18319046691965354,0.1464229101224829,0.0,0.14415373556310682,0.0,0.0,0.16277447903955036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5813135709920352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181277998322254,0.10146363870184992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17173880228426666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07420289562993435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359143064532537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398673262610745,0.16387931627715546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805395679063327,0.0,0.1602118867425302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06938689092835035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074570706064335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326790428829975,0.1133640617875534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483872863376086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874037159895325,0.0,0.14847675758949458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16563339061718582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837708093510408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033968599403442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18292060031716856
mentalhealth,shipwontsail,2020/04/03,"How much can a few words affect you as a child? I was just reminded of something that someone in my family told me when I was younger. ""Do you want me to kill myself?!"" they asked loudly and I know they didn't mean it seriously. They were just tired, but they said it to make me realize that I was behaving badly. 
I'm just wondering now if it had any subconscious effect even if I don't feel like it did. 

Does anyone have a similar experience? And I don't mean a relationship/encounter with narcissistic manipulative people, just perhaps something in your family someone said. Does is still stick with you?",3.9002586206896552,6.029674715517245,5.3115862068965525,77.64203448275866,73.39655172413794,9.122758620689657,27.11724137931035,9.642632912329526,2.7085717241379315,481,18,90,13,10,161,75,116,0.11699999999999999,0.861,0.022000000000000002,-0.9092,0,0,2,0,0,1,15.0,0,4,4,1,9,4,1,0,4,0,13,1,0,5,0,24,25,8,1,3,7,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,6,4,0,0,7,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,10,4,19,1,8,15,2,5,0,0,0,0,13,2,0,3,4,66,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716484986503373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204709648803947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16107028705320767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14385709204172148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015487629501029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379761182566547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685351853268575,0.32484418634485096,0.0,0.08711629581842166,0.1230858402366387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906161918400132,0.0,0.09468748586476844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417344263022464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500662255845442,0.0,0.0,0.3753542171572397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665485681044952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194459683665186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18497773217252167,0.0,0.0,0.3277793608402493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29196585620125115,0.2652784623227045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759306203394106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980249539840439,0.0,0.16463292578205038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162261661613492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18684393324892787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jakbra1,2020/04/03,"I need help To put it simply I hate myself. I have very intense paranoia about everything from things happening to myself and to other people. I have OCD on the compulsive side and do repetitive actions to make myself feel better. Now what brought me here is I am with my girlfriend of two and a half years and we were talking on the phone and I said something that reminded me of someone I used to talk to on a Minecraft server when I was younger. I do not remember when I talked to this person in terms of date but I think it was before my girlfriend and I were dating but I keep thinking well what if it wasn’t? I have messaged five people I used to play Minecraft with and Skype with and none of them have responded but while looking on IG for a response I saw a dm I had opened with a kid I used to play Minecraft with around the time I played Minecraft with the others I had messaged on IG (the others as in the ones who had not responded to my message) and I had messaged him the word “Justin” that being his name. It was dated back to 2015 which was before my girlfriend and I were dating. I am thinking though what if I had talked to that one girl on Minecraft after that which I may have but my girlfriend and I started dating in 2018 and I don’t think I was talking to that girl on Minecraft at that time. I looked on my IG and looked at some of the dates on the pictures I had posted and they were around 2018 a little before my girlfriend and I started dating. So that had calmed me down a little bit but the thought of that could have happened while my girlfriend and I were dating is making me feel horrible. I don’t know any way to really relieve myself and I don’t know what to do. My girlfriend said she would be very upset if she found that to be true which is completely understandable but I don’t think that this happened at the time of us being together which in currently and from Feb. 14, 2018. I don’t know what to do and she helps me with a lot and I love her so much and do not want to lose her.",3.562107371794873,4.609638175480775,4.0857884615384625,90.46754487179487,72.29326923076924,6.892820512820514,25.88589743589744,7.0316486544052195,0.9495643589743592,1595,50,344,14,30,503,164,416,0.038,0.861,0.1,0.9774,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,2,0,2,2,12,12,1,1,19,0,46,1,0,5,1,74,81,38,0,7,12,0,2,0,7,2,0,2,0,4,30,32,0,1,14,3,0,3,10,3,1,5,24,8,66,9,57,50,6,52,0,1,4,1,41,23,0,6,24,271,96,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512223289438719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17049903135496902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363595919942466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24446218849478066,0.0,0.0,0.08469473321589456,0.10454856865741807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040585165304884,0.0,0.0,0.07645909121748913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860657536753066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684146246453182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499936247645293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.254049139295436,0.0,0.0,0.09454629493395264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128376055559093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08511869696749863,0.0,0.0,0.15788678551048144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19195968910441316,0.0,0.0,0.241250808368745,0.1071344811601025,0.0,0.08141441440366534,0.08642999105621864,0.0,0.12784530628897586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039694150520885,0.07100716998641131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297831916418626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13278023535591876,0.08361669785737201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171463622954824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626842611070972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061348332673901815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848099276027134,0.0,0.18218539006537354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08113981499848,0.07372315939953135,0.0,0.0,0.13556331556722145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38485400421280697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636207885438975,0.3068058320158396,0.09408681882442048,0.0760252524663949,0.16752080671512895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935466927272078,0.09969282719005926,0.11519129089003073,0.2481258707286561,0.0,0.15802927283085652,0.056483593110359824,0.07601233927492801,0.0,0.0,0.08610258184481798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802740153093326,0.0,0.0,0.061668335544673464
mentalhealth,hgzrl47,2020/04/03,"Time’s are tough, feel free to reach out! I’m doing my best to pass the time during the quarantine.  Currently reading/gaming.  If anyone needs to chat about anything, hit me up! I know it’s lonely and things are tough.  But you’re not alone!",0.017500000000001847,2.2973990833333358,1.2541666666666664,96.7575,99.83333333333334,4.066666666666666,14.333333333333336,5.985473137389443,-0.6415916666666663,188,4,39,2,8,59,40,48,0.106,0.677,0.217,0.7728,1,4,0,0,1,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,8,3,0,2,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,1,1,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,3,3,6,7,1,6,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,3,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4143118905261697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27971125829051563,0.0,0.32919175992513944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4198082776515824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20226789704201192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198467974577496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966182166717347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26576308906201696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4665230563125861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway300x2,2020/04/03,"Is this PTSD, where should I go for guidance if it is not? I lose few sources of joy in life due to over association with past events that give me a lot of grief.

Let's say that I was triggered badly recently by something. If I do something too soon, my mind will associate that new activity with the past traumatic event. That new activity will re trigger past traumas if I try to enjoy it next time and I lose yet another one of my few sources of happiness. I want to tell my mind to stop thinking that my past trauma is associated with the current cope that I'm trying to use.

I wanted to say that forgiveness/letting go is impossible for me. The things that give me grief are unforgivable to me and I don't think I would ever be able to forget/forgive those past situations. They go against the core of my own morality and I don't want to ever accept these things that I deem morally wrong. I don't want to change my morality but stop my mind's habit of over associating things so I can cope better in life.

Is there anything in PTSD literature that talks about dealing with over associating traumas with things that make you happy?",5.620267857142861,6.1318883482142885,6.4008928571428605,77.66910714285716,67.30357142857143,9.614285714285714,31.625,9.606745405546679,2.739396428571428,906,35,181,18,14,299,119,224,0.102,0.7879999999999999,0.109,0.1565,1,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,3,9,15,0,0,5,0,18,2,0,4,2,34,32,8,2,9,5,0,0,0,0,4,2,2,0,0,20,8,0,2,3,0,0,3,4,9,0,1,1,2,27,6,32,25,4,30,3,4,0,0,9,7,0,4,20,123,47,0,0.09704882441216586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176415423903784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986291339546743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103171465205466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858317986034981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026647880131782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005307656936326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755724356617162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861961511216972,0.16546525021341027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20662055640461532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984779964409258,0.13709690951405126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171456207786593,0.0,0.08250744001642027,0.0,0.0,0.06478084389159264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29397494143891906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874607187335448,0.10321252575724664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576279506500061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4632204210239452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268897646189645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958240060495994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15435424085428706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908694482562034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14942585281812146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622743255345328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07800416891836727,0.08482495013632158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578997064847356,0.124369936047075,0.0,0.0,0.0565899499607061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177956264743282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381902453686778,0.0,0.0,0.22896764434653186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0689407003956012,0.10610765451501428,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,12947483339002,2020/04/03,"I need some help My relationship with my girlfriend ended about two months ago. We’ve been dating for almost a years but near the end I was overwhelmed what she was doing. She became more distant and started telling her friend all of our personal details. Once she left me she said that she still loved me but I doubt it now. The whole weight of it all caused me to start cutting myself. It started off relatively small and the episodes occurred less frequently but it’s gotten to where I’m doing it multiple times a day all over my left arm and my chest. So I’ve been wondering if I should tell her about it. I mean we’re still sort of friends, but don’t talk about it as much. Now that I’m saying it it’s kinda stupid but should I even tell her and if so what should I say?

Any help would be appreciated",2.075487804878051,4.258392097560979,2.797743902439024,93.26051829268292,79.24390243902441,5.807317073170732,21.22560975609756,6.9077264865688965,0.3167268292682928,640,18,139,7,16,200,100,164,0.054000000000000006,0.8029999999999999,0.14400000000000002,0.9464,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,1,0,0,0,11,7,2,2,5,0,12,4,2,1,3,28,23,14,0,7,7,0,1,0,3,4,0,3,0,1,13,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,6,4,24,3,14,12,8,23,0,1,0,1,24,7,0,8,16,96,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12914172881892202,0.0,0.1458833491547442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099071383734556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965951400091074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395533040020763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580688684262321,0.0,0.0,0.0962241395968464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22511307525878388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953003282803555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165762363991013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148718079110724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586946158647649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628506722929725,0.0,0.10709587333886933,0.10802422264969544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515069116649766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720727763556336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641209720767096,0.0,0.0,0.13858061899741805,0.2317104939240996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093516144940062,0.0,0.23268983937895685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709677951301835,0.3820076011723321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495059924471847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14231392076659866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17740613512782938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16265306512541747,0.0,0.0,0.15799010565627522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349105830670444,0.0,0.0,0.09381692032774694
mentalhealth,Iwantt0believ3,2020/04/03,"How do you help? How do you help someone suffering from suicidal thoughts? I'll tell you how my friend was helped after self harming and attempted suicide. He checked himself into an emergency room to get stitches and seek mental health help. After being treated they baker acted him. Transported him in a cop car, hand cuffed and given hospital clothes for the hour long ride. He stayed 2 nights where he was treated like an animal. Did everything right to leave as soon as possible. My heart was broken for him, I felt like I had no way to help him, he didn't want to be helped, the help made it worse. After that he tried helping himself by changing things at work, buying his dream bike. Things were looking up for him and I was relieved. Thankfully the hospital was there to help, right? $5,000 bill shouldn't give anyone anxiety right? Atleast there was insurance. All you have to do is fill out a form about your injury. Okay fill in the blanks.
Describe your injury: cuts to the wrist 
How the injury came about: self harm

He never filled it out. Could you blame him? 
I still get the mail from that hospital addressed to him to our house. 

I never knew you were suicidal and I wish I would've known because I miss you so so much every day. It's almost been 3 months since the last time I heard your laugh. 

Please if you feel alone you're not. I know it sounds cliché but it's so true. Please don't hurt yourself and please please stay alive.

I think about you everyday.

So the question remains, how do you help someone that suffers suicidal thoughts? I don't have the answer but I wish I had.",2.518614298323037,5.091595430420714,2.687708149455723,92.47071491615179,80.13268608414239,5.946101794645482,22.63224477787585,7.229369725052465,0.8093055016181232,1264,41,252,17,33,383,175,309,0.136,0.68,0.184,0.9354,0,1,0,0,0,1,38.0,1,13,1,2,17,17,1,0,14,1,26,4,3,6,4,40,46,20,4,6,4,0,3,2,1,1,1,2,2,2,10,10,0,0,10,2,3,8,8,7,0,0,21,6,41,10,30,21,3,38,0,4,1,0,49,12,0,3,17,151,51,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172012168992009,0.08452282562997845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06243104099866955,0.0,0.0,0.057063257057880165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049748391236798965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333952230704826,0.0,0.0,0.08633202564329139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515854186165791,0.0,0.0,0.05263137347893773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06875952009566141,0.0,0.07334535271620983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04126421322475788,0.0,0.07835791415474748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0630512941015164,0.0,0.08527518661395411,0.0782872648178904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674707792377398,0.0,0.09670764559167608,0.5470112485634887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08036891449352249,0.09416640118329844,0.08736465326294078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04485044468125599,0.06652263144367097,0.0,0.08641267269121869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974055489675763,0.0,0.0,0.07222183578221042,0.06853142269042127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07722087826823502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224317712232734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513992103799787,0.0,0.05999236960523301,0.0,0.12588454862836435,0.0,0.0,0.07658498353577481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583308785645654,0.0,0.09200244459017427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142131263345248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090821908097724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027300521459454,0.0,0.0,0.06750821834875187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382949221090482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17396972830928642,0.06517344885565346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35707017108794425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133029651237212,0.0751350592554083,0.0,0.0,0.10843544561149608,0.05229206973423234,0.0,0.1295776477720311,0.04758715335323288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05540749073713352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04813539511880028,0.0647778192466278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18769378549774374,0.0,0.0,0.059412684989295535,0.0,0.0831670484299532,0.05797304440598984,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Xx_Adolphfamily_xX,2020/04/03,"When ever I am not being exited or being distracted with gaming I want to kill myself Every time I start to think I think about why we are alive and why we matter then think of myself in the third person then think about religion then think about my problems who for some reason aren’t a problem at that moment and I’m just angry for no reason then I get some work done after a nap and become very hyper then descend into violent madness, then finally i go to bed lonely. So I don’t know what to do or how I can change my view of the world and this pattern. Feeling joy and hope and peace feels weird now and I like feeling sad and lonely because I get emotion out of it. When I play games I get extremely toxic. Is there something wrong with me? How can I improve my emotions and mind set?",4.104932659932661,4.874793500000003,5.158574635241301,84.30904040404045,70.79012345679013,7.372390572390572,25.221099887766556,7.348242739294969,1.162153086419753,625,17,124,6,11,206,102,162,0.207,0.652,0.141,-0.9332,1,4,1,0,0,1,7.0,2,0,0,1,12,15,3,1,4,0,11,0,0,4,1,41,28,22,1,4,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,15,0,0,11,4,0,1,4,11,0,1,1,4,21,4,19,25,2,23,0,3,1,0,6,6,0,5,16,91,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891451715282611,0.16150809914127062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547001429196094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149651984966198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3289955583019051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322804118882756,0.12321160666185706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22182659224438095,0.0,0.0,0.16019630071515115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292095567961491,0.0,0.0831102800730398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14524707653701804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617903970213342,0.0,0.08036843975915094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144437505721811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765843393662545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768915757354254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798595427012416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007135137774494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258096000685593,0.0,0.0,0.1035078280188787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4685162082766758,0.0,0.0,0.08527240464969395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066145421187875,0.0862548104122809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639136366099665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646281945309563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159888016485557,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LeeTheReader,2020/04/03,"Do these count as suicide attempts? Quarantine has been hitting me real hard fellas. I (16F) was diagnosed with type 1 Bipolar Disorder one year ago but I’ve been dealing with what I now know is this illness since about 5th grade (8-9ish) after my grandparents died. 

Summer of 7th grade I nearly overdosed on sleeping pills but my best friend called me just as I had slipped the first one in my mouth (hadn’t swallowed yet) and talked me out of it.

This past Christmas Eve I had been developing a dependency on alcohol which rendered my antidepressants useless and after intoxicating myself I got myself ready to down all of my prescriptions before my girlfriend called me after I texted her goodbye.

And just last night, after going through a month of this covid-19 hell, my own personal purgatory, I nearly left work early to walk down to the highway next door to let myself fall off the overpass.

This quarantine took away all social interaction, and at this point my life has come to a state where about 90% of my happiness comes from making other people happy. I hadn’t received any hugs or physical affection in that time either (affection is integral to my mental health) and everyone around me had become emotionally unavailable or busy. 

Just before my quick three hour shift I sent a short ambiguous (I love you, I won’t mind being someone’s ghost story) to my brother, who laughed it off. But when I sent a little more heartfelt and apologetic text my girlfriend immediately began blowing up my phone. And long story short she got me to go home from work as my mom came to pick me up. If it weren’t for the fact I promised her to always make her happy, I don’t know what would’ve pulled me out.

I have ambition, I want to live life, but when my medication is off (quarantine + my terrible memory hasn’t helped this) I become unstable. And the whole situation which spanned the duration of my shift, and got my sister (best friend who I have a sibling like friendship with) got involved too. They got my mom to show up early to watch me.

I know that wasn’t my brain talking, just the sick parts. But I have this terrible habit of imagining other scenarios for things that have happened. And I don’t want to think about it. But the stress and overflow of huge assignments from online school is driving me up the wall.

Do these count as suicide attempts or just ideation? Also, how do I stop myself from traumatizing my girlfriend and take care of myself so I can stay around to be with her?",6.925240121580548,7.357109514893619,6.773449848024317,76.39750000000002,64.48936170212765,9.948328267477203,32.955927051671736,9.784248007369934,3.0816778115501515,1992,76,361,38,28,630,249,470,0.115,0.7390000000000001,0.146,0.9585,3,3,1,0,0,2,51.0,0,1,1,7,20,19,1,1,15,0,32,17,3,7,3,60,59,31,4,3,16,4,1,1,5,1,11,0,2,1,25,23,2,1,5,1,0,13,8,5,0,4,21,2,68,14,67,33,9,72,1,1,1,2,33,31,1,6,27,257,93,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788204851333252,0.09389496865829744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702611228106809,0.07310605113438949,0.0,0.0,0.05974739834183738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564269695694164,0.0,0.0,0.08254678949443353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940675880096892,0.14952374026857487,0.0,0.1844060195949442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808013660188918,0.17942852186330727,0.1004877366811918,0.0895785040986344,0.0,0.0,0.15136617056386728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905791736746486,0.0,0.0891754318944867,0.0911841760919344,0.0,0.1006944732514231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882998872041814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395341271902958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07473315264498978,0.0,0.0,0.1357598942544219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986503264134496,0.0,0.35134590330734305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769376882649645,0.2805838646603442,0.07870475651199851,0.0,0.0,0.09339042357203907,0.0,0.0,0.05889029743100267,0.0,0.08813013225139618,0.0,0.0865238016797571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485566983100204,0.07161712966412731,0.0,0.0,0.09545948481135116,0.08984217940442549,0.12411537159001587,0.042923660231076764,0.08805819073415969,0.0775814514376392,0.07775279578613202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929653015264489,0.0,0.11729365074703994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850909261497872,0.08854160083770843,0.0,0.08871293847097995,0.2057997124767426,0.0701285272402307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09343945850064413,0.0824500861913584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907159359349473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514315803652476,0.08387172969435619,0.060910638818227274,0.07671543085777781,0.0,0.0,0.08305552265238826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000322121556074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891839373773018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726781957050312,0.09875763604476992,0.0879228414642242,0.08956158418327176,0.07444297642495316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364642016987247,0.0,0.0734543845102996,0.10064263492967752,0.0,0.0,0.19220782602121794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06605932739225634,0.14123609999948614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05836987503359496,0.05629674980210676,0.0,0.0,0.051231517125581716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097615015570814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036434897069936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809187181241992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792536531496904,0.0,0.0,0.062412790175981475,0.0,0.0,0.0565785668750197
mentalhealth,292929278228292828,2020/04/03,"not educated enough about DID, friend has it? Hey all! Hope you're having a good day! :)

My friend, let's call them W, says they have dissociative identity disorder. I know it must be different for everyone, so I don't want to jump to conclusions, but they don't really show any symptoms of it. Their alters are fictional characters, but I didn't think that sounded right. Please excuse any ignorance, I really do want to understand! I know DID is a real, serious disorder and I do not mean to belittle anyone at all.

Thoughts? Am I completely wrong?",2.616229773462784,5.413256893203887,4.483713592233013,78.20447006472494,82.00970873786406,10.03527508090615,26.059061488673137,9.928628108626363,3.512366343042072,432,18,79,17,12,146,74,103,0.171,0.6709999999999999,0.158,-0.5419,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,4,1,2,7,0,0,2,0,16,1,0,0,3,20,25,4,0,4,4,0,0,0,2,1,1,2,0,0,4,1,0,1,7,1,0,1,5,3,0,0,4,2,12,4,8,18,3,4,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,1,1,51,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24029109820487102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353577240211895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180405665202078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852411326177508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394122436281608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18458852547822166,0.4049713666578603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825532487277667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16882122318434345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27299844836699033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481872128883822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17547885594182425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19419271215652886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18066289540084893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924516549981515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19393688750583887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20109565032796675,0.2263659824925964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15088010083858086,0.0,0.1404996249971488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836337225851361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320666849723353,0.0,0.14026078801750608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839256569065865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20841583612553372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19316716646301935,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigBoHorvat,2020/04/03,Has anyone used online therapy? I have been considering it as I want answers as to what is wrong w me. but it’s so expensive.,0.6564102564102541,2.9477943846153885,4.128461538461536,80.89987179487181,85.92307692307692,8.082051282051282,24.051282051282055,8.841846274778883,2.2867589743589747,98,4,20,3,3,36,23,26,0.08800000000000001,0.862,0.05,-0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,6,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.345915395706419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5657483517041991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4272738890027512,0.0,0.0,0.2917950202722478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.540891885202613,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soundforest666,2020/04/03,"What’s wrong with me? I don’t know why but sometimes I get heavily frustrated for no apparent reason and I suddenly feel the urge to declutter everything around me. I constantly find myself throwing things away. When I throw stuff away I feel some sense of euphoria almost...? It’s not just average cleaning either, I get tunnel vision like I NEED to throw stuff away or else I’ll loose my mind. Does anyone else do this?",2.3520000000000003,5.196160200000001,3.4600000000000013,84.50500000000002,84.5,7.7,23.0,8.548686976883017,2.0916,336,12,61,9,10,108,61,80,0.151,0.7120000000000001,0.13699999999999998,0.212,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,17,8,4,0,1,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,0,5,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,0,2,12,1,9,8,2,10,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,4,39,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781352433529126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438769023234465,0.18227352693021204,0.0,0.1583634638080751,0.0,0.0,0.5014120856483183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922403229326308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556763248016796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972153856074576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598797454619897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798972031013359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16259198362047042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185884648790427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776594445242184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691007097082122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17962232803624895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190622028632612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18290476194488525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17594181260567554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4072923650237185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11818493470542615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605217546487754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19449927092251434,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sigaportugal,2020/04/03,"Schizophrenia and weed Hello everyone, I hope you’re doing well

I have a weird question, and I honestly don’t know where else to ask this but can drugs dispute or trigger schizophrenia in a person?

I know it sounds weird but my mom tells me that and tells me that she had a friend who was completely normal and just for doing drugs ONCE he developed schizophrenia, is that possible? 

I don’t have schizophrenia but I’ve had family members with it and I have OCD so maybe it could be easier for me to get it. Idk what do think about this? I wanna try weed (and get high) but I’m scared because of this",1.5387142857142848,4.0707556333333335,2.404523809523809,93.09000000000002,84.33333333333334,5.761904761904763,20.238095238095237,7.1686216300943375,0.5295595238095232,476,14,98,7,14,149,75,120,0.102,0.782,0.11599999999999999,0.3899,0,0,2,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,3,0,15,2,0,1,0,22,23,12,0,4,6,1,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,12,7,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,3,1,12,4,9,18,0,3,0,0,0,0,11,3,0,3,0,66,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17252493267825222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249709479534474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19349222354988765,0.0,0.0,0.1473443960357706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42802789010634906,0.0,0.1541639079515391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17634093138350992,0.0,0.0,0.17397287359882105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257923187394814,0.0,0.19283459251049292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19498222921588265,0.0,0.18329511130898984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20284252822987456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18540054656305244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161372111105457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18081519975492405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19653470901946835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16113782740700205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080470839991378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067329579500612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18476202766755614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226014320879857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11824916906228045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12529413681254478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659283770841271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon_persona,2020/04/03,"hey, I relapsed I relapsed after having been clean for almost two years, now I don’t know how to convince myself not to continue. Help",4.453461538461539,6.121099730769237,5.364615384615386,79.75538461538463,70.92307692307692,6.7384615384615385,28.384615384615394,7.1686216300943375,1.7743692307692314,107,4,18,1,2,35,22,26,0.087,0.732,0.18100000000000002,0.3489,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,4,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,4,1,4,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5666374881893121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3792910160773132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109875853439327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5527731784661718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3644019992150184
mentalhealth,justbellaforshort,2020/04/03,"I hit myself when I'm mad at myself [copied this from my ReachOut post] Hey everyone, 

I just wanted to write about this as it's been a huge issue for me and wanted to see if anyone else comes from a similar place in regards to this issue.

\~\~\~

I have this idea that I need to portray perfection and always be on top of everything, so when I mess up in the slightest, I get so so mad at myself and fall into the trap of thinking I'm worthless, a complete idiot, a total waste of space, and so on and so forth.

To deal with my frustrations, I will often hit myself as a sort of 'self-punishment' for being stupid. This happens quite commonly, as I frequently disappoint myself, however, one of the worst 'sessions' was this morning (only in the last hour or so).

To offer some context, after a lesson yesterday, myself and a number of other peers hosted our own Zoom conference and we were just mucking around, being funny. I decide to change my name to *'big dick peen 69'* which is stupid the more I think about it. Well anyway, it was funny at the time but when we finished the call, I forgot to change my name back. So, when I had an *actual class* today, my name came up as *'big dick peen 69'* in front of my class, and of course in front of my **teacher.** 

I've since offered a genuine apology via email regarding this incident, but I was so mortified by my own idiocy and forgetfulness that, after class, I took my lunch break and spent that (plus more time) just hitting my head over and over again. I would find anything I could to hit myself with, (without hurting myself to the point of bleeding or brain damage). A heavy book, the wall - I'd just *punch and slap myself* if that would suffice. All the while, I called myself a number of names over and over again to remind myself that I'm *'a f\*cking idiot',* or 'a *complete f\*ckwit',* and so on. 

Because I have this idea that I must be perfect and present myself as such at all times, it hits me really hard (literally) when I make a mistake. I'm normally a confident person but if ever I feel I've jeopardized my image or relationship with someone - *especially* a teacher - then I feel as though I'm a complete failure and a total idiot.

\~\~\~

That was all I had to say regarding this issue. Does anyone have any similar issues or ways I can overcome this? I don't want it to get to the point where I hurt myself with *the intention* of bleeding out or causing brain damage. Anything you have would be a huge help.

Thank you,

Bella",3.5244729344729318,5.199130592592597,4.736255144032923,83.3013532763533,73.32098765432099,7.371446660335549,25.424501424501425,8.055295364500962,1.5684457739791076,1932,63,368,29,39,637,231,486,0.12,0.807,0.073,-0.9726,1,0,0,0,0,3,96.0,3,2,0,5,31,21,8,0,31,0,26,8,5,3,9,86,55,52,0,14,17,0,3,0,0,5,2,1,0,1,24,28,1,1,9,1,1,6,2,17,1,1,12,5,57,4,69,27,11,65,0,6,1,2,22,32,2,12,24,277,81,5,0.0,0.0,0.0925519022025676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789159637043653,0.0,0.0,0.06449566685399481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13263116413251266,0.09717661780734084,0.15609341793584258,0.0844292973110468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292747932495684,0.0,0.05781467255508825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117495988386903,0.19368813523880565,0.10847373722989112,0.0,0.09742863976135993,0.20066006837593295,0.08169780091341731,0.2983194250529821,0.0,0.0,0.07572344890445858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777771704478573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299668619841018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922814250666166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578982537880185,0.0,0.0906253910338207,0.08523768196927069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09590971352126977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668367434878986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910183763918293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386827828377882,0.0,0.08495961157639474,0.0,0.09733503445879846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357045008574029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340005494718114,0.0,0.2030601873030837,0.21412966479137527,0.0,0.3959607363365368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730871408709541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330762872207489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07032398270365939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292481362146604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06426724882849627,0.07213145211122136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281218945895534,0.0990894804947226,0.0,0.1793122869961645,0.0,0.0908322144526173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087591389014,0.0,0.0,0.06075807677849202,0.0,0.0,0.10182458479099596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542199502706022,0.0,0.0,0.07557662436414407,0.0,0.09894066719257837,0.0,0.0,0.07845410558167877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035913764234237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08731757430269195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215415740590293,0.09318157336670503,0.0,0.1659090246265593,0.0,0.089898923723166,0.0,0.10537271410852744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678204282339501,0.07528099533410071,0.0,0.0,0.08527415580080377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142409742371516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20211865123839254,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheImmortalBitch,2020/04/03,"Adjusting to home life I don't post at all, but I just need advice or something. I'm in Canada, and can't seem to find free counselling, so if you have any suggestions or cheap or free counselling please let me know! I am not working right now because I need to finish up the semester first.

I'm a 22 year old female college student. I grew up with an abusive father (who has since left), and my siblings and myself have picked up bad traits from him (mine are anger issues). 

When I moved away to college at 19, I started counselling to heal from everything I had experienced, and gain coping skills. Moving out of my mom's house had helped me see the toxic problems I had since I no longer lived in the space that gave those to me. I started taking action to change my mental health and take it seriously. I had my anger issues diminished, my depression was at bay, and the anxiety too. I decided last summer I was going to stay in the city I went to college in because I had deemed my family to be toxic to my mental health.

Well with this COVID 19 break out, I had to move home again because I do have a job here (I used to come work on Christmas breaks and what not). I had to move home because I have no money, and my mom isn't going to charge me much rent to live with her.

The problem is though when I come back to my mom's house, I immediately go back to my old habits because everyone here is still stuck doing the same things. I get way more snappy, I get extremely depressed, and anxious. I feel even though I try to be the better person in a lot of situations (using my coping skills, using my ""I feel this way when _____"" statements) people will fly off the handle at me. Nobody here deals with their emotions so everyone blows up on one another constantly. I feel like since I have allowed myself to deal with my emotions I have become more sensitive to all of it. Nobody knows how to have an adult conversation, so they turn to talking shit about one another behind one another's backs.
My mother's boyfriend is always making unnecessary comments about my siblings being lazy or something (no hate to anyone who is unemployed, I know people cannot work for mental or physical reasons). My mom's boyfriend is of sound mind and body, but will not get a job. Everytime we say something about it, my mother immediately defends her boyfriend. My mom tells my brother he is JUST like our Father (and granted in some ways he can be, but he also is better than him in many ways too). My brother has expressed wanting suicidal thoughts when my mom says this but she doesn't seem to care.

I know my sister has an extreme attitude problem (18 year old). And my brother doesn't help much around the house, but he still works. But I feel as though if people would actually thank one another for something they did, or acknowledged the good in someone, we wouldn't have nearly the same issues.

I'm so exhausted already, and I have only been home for about 1.5 weeks.. I have to be here until September when I go off to University. I'm tired. I feel like I'm going nuts.",6.303093863169223,6.113261292845259,6.598665459528237,79.23714275227564,65.85524126455907,9.40003915043555,31.486786728002357,8.925248442259385,2.446778760888716,2411,83,469,35,34,779,274,601,0.146,0.782,0.071,-0.9945,6,0,4,0,0,0,71.0,3,1,3,10,36,23,4,0,19,0,52,8,2,8,2,84,98,43,1,10,19,14,5,3,0,4,6,3,5,2,12,25,0,0,18,0,5,14,13,12,1,5,15,10,81,13,74,73,10,76,0,2,1,0,47,28,1,12,29,317,93,11,0.0,0.06282702104422237,0.05174562965434435,0.0,0.0,0.051816296114127726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851539959839516,0.0424047933446489,0.04412179689969117,0.0,0.0,0.036059430567211,0.2224091196821699,0.04056466862228848,0.059904174162420464,0.0,0.03707694243174164,0.0,0.0,0.0472042934468478,0.0,0.0,0.049819578875895366,0.12232093280529187,0.04427441189106536,0.16162048339508836,0.05856294089278576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379419949435527,0.0,0.05889982144486721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406343938824629,0.0,0.056094371576883635,0.09135423581867272,0.0,0.05730216047197855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093347497833792,0.09134226052749436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192940015842226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035023107075790656,0.0,0.0,0.10133704030096376,0.047656260096340886,0.0,0.04998809965684127,0.0,0.1340574423112237,0.07576342759680317,0.0,0.0,0.04846471226612814,0.0451038037414219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831115330939118,0.0,0.1506792057295836,0.044475609408894966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052352098600288624,0.0,0.11272810491834398,0.0,0.0,0.07108428652059498,0.0,0.21275720603707304,0.0,0.0,0.1835543087981848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16603579018252346,0.10524004811479916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656659232039406,0.04322318605023176,0.0,0.0,0.057612795871753976,0.054222575712928815,0.037453761572743126,0.07771732939420252,0.0,0.09364568296056022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0450807242454388,0.0,0.0,0.035395200230215695,0.05375994020121396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603129071553916,0.0,0.0535410433589967,0.3726197616345719,0.0,0.2254325612850212,0.07796027597726553,0.07863606642762495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16692528747277566,0.0,0.14372688956751478,0.04032858664760959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11028444813800348,0.04630017087309117,0.0,0.05820651519496067,0.0,0.0,0.05078415481360821,0.0,0.0,0.15221587596507258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05451945700136899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045283829162276565,0.0,0.08433664850928994,0.0,0.0,0.04225477728499895,0.09654557631308999,0.0,0.0,0.054430324696964266,0.1315907181488407,0.059603333680968464,0.0,0.0,0.044928673283041114,0.1632877147731803,0.0,0.0,0.075064010367778,0.05651855444254208,0.0846931050167044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058001728520732924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973775580282355,0.04262021010836972,0.04634697410885103,0.04881912477923599,0.0,0.0,0.03522805200568626,0.0,0.1562930335723193,0.04209664181989271,0.0,0.06094547201646541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03600110561975472,0.0576769527999817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373920581313467,0.0,0.0,0.0312760498745915,0.1683579661514826,0.04253417878022831,0.0,0.04767665256082482,0.0491555408595003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441394793353175,0.0,0.0,0.03766807821455849,0.0,0.0,0.06829388259382864
mentalhealth,Joisdu,2020/04/03,"Im too scared to call suicide prevention hotline This is really hard to put out there, but I don’t think it’s a good idea to keep this all in. I’ve been struggling with suicidal thoughts for a few years, and back in October I had a failed attempt after my boyfriend called me and talked me out of it. It took him a long time, and I was not going to listen, but he was able to pull me away, but now I’m afraid I’ve scared him to death, whenever we talk about my depression and thoughts he gets really sad and I don’t like causing him pain. I’ve been having the thoughts so frequently that they drown out my senses, I’ve started taking antidepressants prescribed by my therapist of three years. They just make me feel fake, I don’t like them. I also don’t want to think like this, I don’t want to die, but at the same time what’s the point of living anymore..? I the thoughts have been destroying me tonight, and it hurts so bad. I want to call the suicide prevention hotline, to just tell someone how I feel, but I’m scared they will call police or I’ll get baker- acted again. I feel lost. I feel like I’m losing.",3.60926948051948,4.396569567099569,4.292573051948054,90.00171672077923,71.94372294372296,7.852922077922077,26.125811688311693,8.07648339933343,1.2855733766233772,874,27,196,12,16,279,123,231,0.32,0.605,0.075,-0.9976,0,0,0,0,0,4,26.0,1,0,4,4,12,20,1,5,9,0,15,1,0,3,1,42,41,16,6,3,9,0,5,4,0,1,1,1,0,0,9,11,0,3,11,0,0,5,6,15,0,1,12,6,29,5,25,28,3,25,0,6,0,0,18,8,0,1,16,115,38,1,0.10223674316996063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175868657589958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013913773922064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960547856359648,0.07861374480016217,0.08536341011530202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41758058211870797,0.0,0.0,0.10502529764257712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805635708331981,0.0,0.10610559831031903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067758768686121,0.07303794974848707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682895728068467,0.0,0.05810349719015955,0.08575132958153744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915840405374048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944654807405957,0.11541283873973665,0.110433226536768,0.0,0.0,0.09087271482405783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19979083414189466,0.0,0.09027691728303948,0.09047630050272873,0.0,0.11437676446107715,0.11160348224298663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06824381994727002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10878710295918784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664676813137783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277616486375224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13099095119220636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070704457715389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866248607171361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236369302532739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688004193803943,0.0,0.33549120999917104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768693073441347,0.1643480430020258,0.08935941979740965,0.0,0.0,0.11870473871661573,0.0,0.13101835376910845,0.0,0.3246582164876731,0.11923013421702748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358878343946005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18090563995296144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167422127632467
mentalhealth,smallGato,2020/04/03,"Does anyone need a friend? Recently I've progressively been feeling very lonely. I dont really have any friends and really need some. I dont have anyone to text apart from family, which live in a different time zone than mine. The quarantine has been straining my mental health and it feels way lonelier than before.",5.158965517241381,7.601014206896554,5.616758620689655,75.45410344827587,70.72413793103449,10.157241379310344,25.393103448275863,10.355215969177356,3.0981406896551715,256,8,43,8,5,82,46,58,0.124,0.743,0.133,0.1458,1,3,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,1,3,0,7,1,0,0,0,7,11,2,0,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,2,4,2,5,9,1,5,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,24,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382806715282313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843652502009743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17303048992572698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21245086022930415,0.0,0.0,0.1779474197563581,0.0,0.4766345438909112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19169431907928206,0.0,0.2056333431178409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142056368161154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21614481708410374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17955618990391176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20492259682961805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015535159847539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26053432943684096,0.0,0.20077734688385632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857133177587766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16777982723356796,0.0,0.16140474385169198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,betrbleave,2020/04/03,Is there any way to find a therapist and get an appointment within a day? I need to find someone right now.,2.0536363636363646,3.9597834545454553,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727276,78.0909090909091,8.036363636363637,24.63636363636364,8.841846274778883,1.8164727272727281,84,3,18,2,2,28,19,22,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,11,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23369088467029595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22162307068954426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6281719542771369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17954071366360502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25480895900743505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934715809908989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911699170347892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3989991861183568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.272769989933002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fantacisious,2020/04/03,"I fucked this one up bad. Hey fellas, i want to share a story with all of you guys. Last fall my mental health problems became clear to my parents, i got on a waiting list at an psychiatrist and started treatment about 2 weeks ago. My diagnose i social anxiety. Because of this i struggle with a whole lot of for other people normal stuff. Meeting my girlfriends parents and her family etc, i want to focus on her in this case. I dont feel worthy as a human being, everything i do seems wrong and whatever it is whatever someone says i feel like im a total piece of shit. Its never enough. The pressure of a relationship and my feelings of worthlessness made me break up with my gf, i felt to guilty about my mental state. It feels like im dragging her in my shit and because if this like i said i broke up. I fucked up bad you guys. After all of this i see that with breaking up with her my problem is not her or the pressure of my relationship it is me and the pressure i put on myself for almost about everything that i do, say, think, or acchieve. I feel even more awfull than i already did and i regret it a whole lot, by being scared that i might be hurting her i hurt her a whole lot. Im analysing a lot of things that is part of my problem but i feel like the biggest idiot that i could not see that i did not need to break up or something like that. I really hate myself, i cant sleep and feel like i threw away the best thing that ever happend to me. Thanks for reading you guys.",3.3746994373704453,4.334266690553747,4.650318329878591,86.57667382291977,72.64820846905538,7.145336097127628,26.332395617411905,7.348242739294969,1.2210013029315958,1162,38,244,12,22,385,148,307,0.156,0.733,0.111,-0.8984,2,0,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,3,0,1,5,32,6,5,15,0,15,7,3,1,6,54,40,14,0,10,8,2,8,6,2,1,2,3,0,4,22,13,0,1,10,1,0,3,6,23,0,1,7,13,53,9,44,28,16,28,0,5,2,2,27,14,4,11,13,185,75,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022454994747165,0.0,0.07932829018873043,0.0,0.08742223560851926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060603773400130234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744306454761899,0.0,0.132292288673886,0.0965846534450784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313744939209408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06325144419986475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804075482181199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284630745505773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818563691279227,0.08835224713188197,0.052324658799837415,0.07165984158632169,0.0,0.0,0.14239727753572246,0.0,0.07468241618130166,0.0,0.2803952795697935,0.2263817136457997,0.07606448967657567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464768952017581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633601925132267,0.0,0.0,0.23532344502225255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821423983850545,0.0,0.0842081145776165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696152287334451,0.0,0.2567165064831198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457560882379855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232219987483473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694031125779427,0.0,0.07496073321005313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15967207306809186,0.08404085813409977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05874129522950008,0.061100043645064724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776196640353358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053682133631859835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17593087362036686,0.08578851713886733,0.0,0.05492179879283428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274111133702431,0.0,0.07963888774233223,0.0,0.0,0.07924234057219161,0.0,0.05075093856190707,0.0,0.0,0.170107202887925,0.0,0.0,0.07535721946375097,0.12599928236009567,0.07931394337135964,0.0,0.1262576046903044,0.07211973409846383,0.0,0.0,0.1626382354923445,0.0,0.0,0.07927811465913183,0.08075573334176203,0.06712361341262937,0.06098812095128017,0.0,0.0,0.056072962375123186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08281888775557225,0.0906889796654256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293596314719725,0.0,0.0,0.10526169465156444,0.05076155537539028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345308140441463,0.0,0.06354622927059328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653419247319764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661562032769661,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fishbubble8,2020/04/03,"Why can’t I cry anymore? Alright I know this sounds dumb, but I used to cry a lot when I was younger. So like when my mom went on a business trip I would cry, if I talked about my dad I would cry, if my cousin said something mean to me I would cry. I was pretty sensitive and always cried. However, I just don’t cry over things anymore and this sounds stupid but I kinda miss it? Like it’s kind of frustrating to me that I can’t cry when I feel sad. A part of me thinks I cried so much I got used to it and I just don’t do it anymore. Is something wrong with me 😣",-0.4352747252747236,1.3060292698412717,1.4884126984126986,101.65445054945059,85.66666666666667,4.829304029304031,18.42246642246642,5.8734145424116955,-0.5940493284493287,432,11,113,3,13,142,66,126,0.368,0.5489999999999999,0.083,-0.9926,1,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,8,10,3,0,3,1,11,0,0,2,0,21,21,12,0,5,6,3,1,2,0,3,0,3,0,0,8,4,0,0,4,0,0,2,4,6,0,0,5,4,23,4,10,13,3,7,0,2,0,0,5,2,1,4,5,72,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250238050895802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25924022978417066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8614124261364398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04405751522134431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968893539339241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073654276476392,0.047886509757634935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513843925696113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407812130346601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491435546266594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020501643235661,0.0,0.0,0.06405343833046209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435751678212502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886464960711111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288428728398747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415985817438664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07003492395547446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578878878598778,0.05583188138649061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051141729629633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077399330814809,0.0786247871214714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856922563214256,0.09526723530417593,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Greywolf646,2020/04/04,"The lockdowns are affecting my mental health and I can't say anything without someone saying, ""at least you're not dead from covid-19."" I have chronic depression and anxiety. I was in a really good place before covid-19 started because my wonderful primary care found me anti-depressants that really work. I guess life had other plans for me. I work in a hospital as a tech. There's rumors going around that my manager has been involved in shady stuff. All of the staff have been questioned by HR about what kind of manager she is and things she may have been involved in, and there's speculation that she volunteered my floor to be the new covid-19 floor to buy herself more time. I'm stressing out about getting my family sick or getting sick myself. Even though my hospital is lucky enough to have all the PPE we need. I've been working my ass off to care for my covid patients. I come home, strip off my scrubs in the garage, go shower, eat, and go to bed. That's my life on my off days. I slept for 13 hours after work the other day. 

My parents don't want me to leave the house except for work or to walk the dog. They don't want me to go on a hike because I like to go alone or with the dog, because going alone lets me clear my head. I'm stuck between taking all precautions and going on a walk with just one friend for the sake of my mental health. Or laying in bed all day because I don't think there's any point in getting up if I can only stay in the house. The good news is that my guy friend and I admitted that we have feelings for each other.",5.2681578947368415,5.4226945955414045,5.5488937311431465,84.71492960107277,68.01273885350318,8.776131411330876,29.2651692926584,8.532816995589336,1.932467515923568,1229,40,255,17,19,391,164,314,0.09,0.8,0.11,0.8839,2,3,0,0,0,0,31.0,2,0,1,6,9,11,0,1,17,0,24,11,3,1,5,43,52,14,1,4,9,1,1,1,2,1,7,2,4,1,12,15,1,0,6,0,1,10,6,2,0,1,9,3,39,9,47,40,8,41,0,1,0,1,18,22,1,10,9,167,51,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19426109858154936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063775422709779,0.0,0.07174347591669829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717513591733613,0.0834864478150303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286761490116964,0.0,0.07980213369473314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912353382121975,0.0,0.0,0.08078545492843191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814461659735607,0.0,0.1615497301198308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09596307098517108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690255437369956,0.0,0.0619425604684794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884099425844091,0.0,0.047419329236797585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282784278992753,0.1449124963328804,0.0,0.14699270265076664,0.0,0.37309191639876976,0.15732088642056916,0.0,0.0,0.10331216984455044,0.09285957492624912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624806238740803,0.1993731578495017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407165154948356,0.0,0.0923570260752194,0.21642518937334693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766020560974838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930229262478736,0.0,0.09589912076008954,0.13248292825483282,0.045817469069125434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18902172069545292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953865185569859,0.0,0.09057587453504996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354955550285983,0.07132593666295876,0.0,0.0,0.10413454217818847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979829159523127,0.0,0.08865492410618651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050580390182957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015914304300365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14915946602597793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794617409466519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637984732694772,0.09995983419095814,0.0,0.0,0.10742771674413913,0.0,0.10735870497005093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051288667434337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062305030128446875,0.06009213983300639,0.09214098434980073,0.0,0.054685421481513466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063088185635088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904031347137906,0.10170329102486472,0.34137445623938445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IlikeCannedPeaches,2020/04/04,"Nothing makes me happy anymore? What’s wrong with me For the last 5 years nothing makes me happy like it used to :/ I maladaptive daydream which isn’t diagnosed as a mental illness yet :( and I’ve been doing it my whole life to deal with trauma..... but the last 5 years I’ve become obsessed with my daydream with which is all fantasy and I rather be there than in real life, it feels like a part of me is actually there so I can’t be fully happy in this life.... I’ve tried telling my psychiatrist but he doesn’t take it seriously at all :/ I’m so miserable trying to be happy again NOTHING makes me as happy anymore it all seems extremely unsatisfying compared to my daydream world idk what to do :/ my psychiatrist doesn’t seem to think I have a big problem but I feel like I do when I can’t be happy ... thoughts?",2.070314417177915,4.273236533742335,3.8751495398773024,85.42474884969327,79.3680981595092,6.52898773006135,24.9114263803681,7.645422480735847,1.3573070552147235,637,24,128,10,16,214,85,163,0.264,0.691,0.045,-0.9889,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,0,8,15,0,2,5,0,16,5,0,4,3,25,28,10,0,2,4,0,2,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,6,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,2,2,17,9,18,22,5,12,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,2,10,84,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.10262174398745354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20858245684614266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614181076927475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841613848504243,0.0,0.10673597010790624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634489224595006,0.15025375326162166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6716735844146524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714401298350636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22283449001354336,0.1541287241793348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21058689597595204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597732424219518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027137912176872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138788683880336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062465666800012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11969598132126727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19146883479252966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790678132316866,0.0,0.0919151500013168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738277658312572,0.0,0.08348590650901216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427945227009357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09082514284875884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11740824658956688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497679592338833,0.0,0.13544017885701176
mentalhealth,IceBergtheThird,2020/04/04,"Having Trouble with a Particular Issue So for the last 6 weeks, I have had, what I think, are panic attacks before bed. The hallmark of the panic attacks is constantly yelling into my pillow. I'm at my wits end. My pdoc prescribed haldol 1 mg before bed, and it didn't really work. My family needs to be up to function for work, and I'm getting on everyone's nerves. I'm unsure how to proceed, and I'm having self harm thoughts pop into my head when I'm spiraling. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.",4.552857142857143,5.647490399999999,6.383428571428571,74.74100000000001,70.0,8.514285714285714,30.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.6215714285714284,400,16,71,7,7,139,71,100,0.21,0.755,0.034,-0.9469,0,0,0,0,1,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,3,7,2,2,4,0,10,1,1,1,0,11,19,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,2,6,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,3,1,7,1,12,13,0,11,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,6,41,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802084827193529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254087180590511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195980207880014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3138476503895891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992874089736541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633372056607055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17621670830817565,0.0,0.0,0.17385031869784806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634937525152787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033185033870721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892632868087852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19248164554254585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15032307132205158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13674159753457218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4327432062531922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11814115416115173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19238536233166992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181658686321342,0.0,0.14640513735744526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479268183278884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685130485447797,0.0,0.0,0.13100332773782952,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beepboopim-anonymous,2020/04/04,"Some memories I can’t seem to forget I had kind of a fucked up childhood. When I was about 7 or 8 years old I saw my dad nearly kill his wife(my stepmom) in a fit of drunken rage. He pulled a gun on her and everything. Never got charged for it, no one ever talked about it again after that night. Needless to say after that my mom was the only person that took care of me. However, years later ( I was about 15 or 16) depression got the better of my mom and she slowly but surely became an alcoholic. During a family party, after everyone had a little too much to drink, my cousin pulled a shotgun on my uncle(not his dad, another uncle), and came close to shooting him. Like finger on the trigger, I looked away cause I didn’t wanna see someone die. Anyway we stepped in and deescalated the situation as a family. A couple of weeks later my mom drank more than she had ever drank, and she passed out. Nothing out of the ordinary, however I usually stayed in her room watching tv for about an hour after she fell asleep to make sure she was ok, which proved to be useful in this particular instance. She woke up after drinking too much and threw up. I helped her so that she wouldn’t throw up on herself and choke on her own vomit. Her and my dad were abusive throughout my whole life, but to see them like that stuck with me, and those are memories that I wish I could get rid of because they haunt me every single day of my life, but I can’t seem to shake them.",6.10007252559727,5.52094758020478,6.613991040955633,80.26009918941982,66.37201365187714,9.509300341296928,29.91659556313993,8.841846274778883,2.1816622866894204,1143,34,230,16,16,374,170,293,0.124,0.768,0.10800000000000001,-0.7141,2,0,3,3,0,0,33.0,1,0,3,1,12,13,3,1,15,1,15,11,2,4,6,38,36,17,2,4,5,7,1,2,0,1,4,1,1,1,11,15,5,0,3,3,0,10,6,5,0,1,19,7,44,8,48,14,7,53,0,1,5,1,32,21,1,5,23,165,55,0,0.0,0.13208091026820076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913401320247108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689237565033192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473543417688128,0.0,0.0,0.06795477554087527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859152193744597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12749892267423027,0.11365727943082128,0.11451662793605707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900456832269206,0.12334614742952694,0.0,0.07189284079851023,0.0,0.09601417285036204,0.0,0.11569455737214294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21840821185262435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20167296880398172,0.09392339406832297,0.10652015887730452,0.10018750067860624,0.0,0.2101794290264316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305782730814357,0.05824164381491636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783151880505036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472005765478824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978147049770877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333175118484542,0.11608516900722753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747768521490307,0.10892315057427923,0.1117283045877244,0.0,0.0,0.0936118200135808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441114010867206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3916782658370223,0.0,0.0,0.16389547116342712,0.0,0.08597721487501242,0.0,0.0,0.10461273694666864,0.0,0.10696429246812626,0.0,0.11697537964684818,0.0,0.07553906777918236,0.08478257198438544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973366015585342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865024251456761,0.0,0.0,0.17766398451565588,0.20296724864330712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530376956851724,0.0,0.0,0.09445330951135997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118818654676614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21012974708805698,0.0,0.0,0.08960023972763423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385401177451805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627952962487643,0.1227751381849288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941937652667964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12445904736476256,0.12819197512543584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357386406070952
mentalhealth,MineTeam,2020/04/04,"Need advice on giving advice Psychologists of reddit, (and others of course), what are tips and advice I  can five my online best friend who struggles with bullying and depression?

I always tell him to get some rest, that he doesnt deserve that kind of crap and other basic helpful advice, but I end up telling him the same things over and over.

What are other things  I can tell him to be helpful?",5.789200000000001,6.843686853333337,5.678666666666667,81.06600000000002,67.13333333333333,7.6,25.666666666666664,7.554174236665415,1.3488666666666669,314,8,56,3,5,98,51,75,0.10400000000000001,0.745,0.151,0.5945,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,0,6,1,1,1,0,6,1,1,0,0,10,9,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,8,3,10,8,4,5,0,1,0,0,12,4,1,1,1,46,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6747891944535906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436464684884624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18117018408047508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869060272361073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290370876122386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337766894402275,0.0,0.09019486254337,0.165607590426324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314277169381773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17977318592180938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800694930708414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18047598584909266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4526728028098002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22938255546795944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wherearemynipplesbro,2020/04/04,"Just a quick vent Sometimes when my lungs hurt from smoking so much i hope i get lung cancer and suffer while slowly decaying just for all the times I made the wrong decisions and all the people ive ever done wrong, and i want to feel all of that pain because i definitely deserve to. I cant escape the guilt and the more people i let close to me the more people get fucked over. I wish i could move to canada and start over.",5.353636363636365,4.9684407272727285,5.7558181818181815,85.1437272727273,67.86363636363637,8.403636363636364,25.55454545454545,7.554174236665415,1.0836290909090909,336,7,72,3,5,108,58,88,0.287,0.6,0.113,-0.9637,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,1,1,7,0,5,5,2,1,4,19,14,8,0,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,8,0,0,2,1,12,1,9,10,6,11,0,2,0,1,0,3,1,1,7,51,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12303244323529786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16114319284679302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20654006302031014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18256493299389304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205027429045596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18658668485506985,0.2108935444067199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004606911712363,0.0,0.0,0.2160609916445583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20638275014203086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19097448351432933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21451116697168948,0.1483667637185239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21475916561201927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4197662579719586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19961300038061414,0.0,0.14285485973970485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11768749899454554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190433523643626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232092178618912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4413343532807576,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kombiice,2020/04/04,"How to heal after difficult Borderline relationship as Nerd / Geek? Hey\^!

This post should definitely not just be to help me (Even though I experienced a difficult relationship with a borderline partner), but rather for everyone who has been / is / will be in a similar situation. 

It's not uncommon to lose fascination for interests / how you're fascinated in these interests, and so much more. Stating just a few examples usually leads to only these being discussed, mainly. So it might be wise to say this post is open to any thoughts, everything in relation to the topic.

​

This post should be focused on nerds, geeks and more ""unusual"" people. Of course it's really hard to classify these, because the term nerd or geek is within such a wide spectrum.

But sill, there are at least some main aspects shared between people classified as nerds / geeks. (The post shouldn't just be about the the more common nerd /geek aspects, too. Every thoughts are welcome. The possibilities and complexity are endless!",7.800000000000002,9.597998597701157,7.5615517241379315,66.67612068965518,63.022988505747136,11.777011494252875,36.91379310344829,11.538034831475384,4.979917241379312,812,39,126,26,12,258,112,174,0.099,0.723,0.17800000000000002,0.9671,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,0,2,14,18,0,0,11,0,19,1,0,3,0,25,21,13,0,4,9,0,1,0,1,5,1,1,0,1,10,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,13,0,0,3,3,2,5,23,7,10,18,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,3,4,95,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16706648838269625,0.18735961975210355,0.10485554671196633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09399374243948308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184206966715294,0.0,0.12991303761705147,0.1473366411475195,0.13857742976100418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812534941992602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335135092960428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17250091242976434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635728760644475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334853644146455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11726962779332305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21379402320813856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17382781363621194,0.5906915592980077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987790601839758,0.0,0.0,0.3310880568503661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12261931550491074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733177712644365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15149242259895904,0.24482174695106845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16982021682324136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18735961975210355,0.0
mentalhealth,rumfatarlagerinn,2020/04/04,"feeling extreme depression (coming off SSR´S) 19 Male Recently about a month ago i decided with my doctor to go off my SSRS. I was becoming tired of being on them, i dont like the sexual side effects and i read somewhere that people become depended to them in the long term which scared me. In these two years i was able to maintain relatively good mental health were on most days i didnt think about dying at all. I have been on them since the beginning of 2018 when i was 17, i am 19 now. This is making me so sad thinking that i have to be on pills to feel normal its horrible. I feel so shit i hate it anxiety, depression its killing me this darkness. Recently I was rejected by a girl i felt love for and its making me so horribly depressed i cant describe it. Thoughts that i am worthless and i will never find anyone to love in this life. And that no girl will ever want me that i love back. 

I am wondering, has anyone gone through the same. Is it normal to feel this way when coming off zoloft. Did it get any better? should i go back on them and feel normal again but then i have to deal with the side affects again. Should i talk to my doctor about getting new meds?. My mind is killing me, i´ve been self medicating with alcohol as well in this month and its making things even worse.",3.100952380952382,4.684697475095788,4.176683087027918,87.2544827586207,74.24904214559388,7.576792556102903,24.68910782703886,8.269060116576782,1.4100303229337707,1015,32,211,17,21,330,143,261,0.17300000000000001,0.765,0.062,-0.9797,0,1,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,4,2,16,18,4,1,7,0,27,13,1,6,3,42,53,14,3,6,1,0,6,1,0,4,9,0,0,4,21,11,1,0,13,1,0,5,5,11,1,1,12,6,36,7,34,35,4,42,0,6,0,3,13,15,1,3,22,152,57,3,0.09983271346297376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884956769236799,0.10669080962503552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788966856443829,0.0,0.07637175254502182,0.0,0.0,0.1396107089590342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15353038869477426,0.0,0.0,0.2205147771238099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829392223859359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17199408571156816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438384122929677,0.1029231439405882,0.2579573094580537,0.0,0.1036105950218088,0.0,0.0,0.20436602500726525,0.0,0.0,0.11700319666335242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593856569754936,0.09030440485796984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523920978214495,0.0,0.09585506078455376,0.0,0.09124529148305932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431694468221746,0.0,0.11347446341358512,0.08373494352173375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09856413611417947,0.0,0.10611750602299548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22090021199943366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051479792299149,0.04877322105287082,0.0,0.0,0.08834880986244842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703087648891004,0.0,0.19991733435077896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089163898313628,0.10057095587980527,0.10060789426587713,0.0,0.10080258149006163,0.0,0.1593710388530043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699714311420895,0.09641905675955333,0.0,0.0,0.29344458810488805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06921143340432337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09985972961305337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19714552127278934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09994996213411253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414729284766654,0.0,0.10247684573510096,0.08258265221936716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024175348556364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663244188057575,0.12793754343756414,0.0,0.07925602306729478,0.0,0.1147430181402641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09752205479270136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05888392097687765,0.07924256111659328,0.0,0.0,0.0897615988301121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826431917215597,0.0,0.0,0.10173806396609003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642889943260728
mentalhealth,Reinvention-Chloe,2020/04/04,"I’m losing My mental health is progressively getting worse. I thought the quarantine wasn’t affecting me, because I’m an essential employee and I have been working constantly, but pressure is building up from inside and I’m going to explode.  I’m having relationship problems, I’m trouble driving safely, I’m having heart attack symptoms. I’m getting help and I’m on medicine, but I’m afraid I’ll hurt myself on accident.

This isn’t a call for help. This is a message sent to acknowledge that I have a problem. The fact is that I may never post again. Wish me luck.",2.7726758409785965,5.486212926605507,4.407545871559633,79.64110474006118,80.28440366972477,6.936085626911316,31.101681957186546,8.07648339933343,2.787219571865444,455,24,77,9,12,152,68,109,0.266,0.611,0.124,-0.9492,1,1,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,0,3,1,10,1,2,6,0,12,3,1,1,2,16,27,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,0,3,3,8,0,0,4,0,8,2,7,22,0,10,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,2,3,44,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23239432960471745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452523013182018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20858943368946464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22075063042536566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21345237451179566,0.0,0.11609520263399048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21713666659697906,0.0,0.2420689699389129,0.27384484168676665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21868251982602974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22853346681132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20586294960135948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157550847356768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956406896072534,0.0,0.0,0.3909305839229884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21931681515784826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123217924304996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16217294677879465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23490821765639602,0.0,0.0,0.1487159300453674,0.0,0.2081754924662471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nikko672,2020/04/04,"What are you doing to manage your mental health during the COVID-19 pandemic? The pandemic, the response, and related changes to our lives can have significant impacts on mental health. What are you doing to manage your mental health at this time?",8.110714285714286,10.225105785714286,7.00809523809524,69.75357142857145,62.57142857142857,9.40952380952381,33.04761904761905,9.725611199111238,3.5991333333333344,201,8,28,4,3,61,27,42,0.0,0.95,0.05,0.2869,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,6,3,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,5,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,23,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278915411170797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6869614767456268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902246019423999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6512944961425875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561630095245846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sexxxxxxysa,2020/04/04,"My dad told me I’m getting ‘fatter’. I didn’t finished eating. Weighed myself (no weight movement). Went to the toilet and forced vomit. I just don’t want to eat anymore. They know I’m bulimic for almost a decade. Work from home is affecting my mental health and hearing those words made it worse. I just feel more miserable. 

Work from home has made my bulimia worse. I’m relapsing. I wanted to stop eating. Fast for 1-2 weeks. 

I feel lost. I just want to be skinny. 

Idk what to do. I feel alone. Everyone gets upset with me. 

I’m miserable. 

All I know is I wanted to cut my stomach off. I’m better off being skinny. It’s all I ever wanted.",-0.4729926739926711,1.7179164846153867,1.982747252747256,91.87320512820514,99.53846153846158,4.630036630036631,16.959706959706963,6.42735559955562,0.08335531135531138,493,14,100,7,21,167,79,130,0.221,0.737,0.042,-0.9694,0,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,4,4,6,1,3,2,0,8,10,3,3,3,25,31,2,0,5,3,1,4,0,0,0,2,1,2,0,4,3,7,1,5,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,6,5,18,1,13,23,3,9,0,3,0,0,4,2,0,1,5,55,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13969928128495526,0.144490460225759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835659938829098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338540662998207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4282611925671925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12619493427610834,0.0,0.13330794432512624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21162159861292265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457766096655145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14829278504385793,0.1572380988906405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798801474063754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334227991133653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152291828754839,0.0,0.0,0.2640157887967531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14059343643877092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663674749598225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330794432512624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4114335590430957,0.0,0.1119066418342142,0.16988580065166026,0.0,0.12932732364608862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20313012806582256,0.0,0.2843455602364483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Conehead2233,2020/04/04,"I'm struggling with my urge to self harm Hey all, I'm currently struggling with the urge to self harm. It makes me feel normal and stops all of the depressing thoughts. I try so hard not to give into the urge but it's starting to ware me down mentally. I want to tell someone but I feel as if nothing will change or they will make fun of me. 

I'm asking for advice on how to cope with it and if I should tell someone. Thanks",0.44466666666666654,2.601837466666669,1.8177777777777813,98.06000000000004,85.44444444444446,4.933333333333334,20.11111111111111,6.2581,-0.08175555555555558,332,10,77,3,10,106,55,90,0.136,0.7609999999999999,0.10300000000000001,0.2304,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,2,7,0,2,3,0,3,0,0,3,2,24,16,10,0,5,6,0,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,6,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,9,2,16,12,2,6,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,3,3,46,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180674101184998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17284884964644706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955909805646547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15924701357138651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18697367209260085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17736503664032646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16562671259023956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468333890084304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18632742065584307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811546817671697,0.17740864321012825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3857648862684952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31331639934158323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086734889993365,0.0,0.0,0.1545778015325622,0.0,0.3865780518926651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232071189078272,0.17022350402467026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678341552942836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255293775762934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905395837755187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trolltruckllama,2020/04/04,"An article which speaks to any teens experiencing depression and its symptoms. [Please, I recommend reading it.](https://medium.com/@coopsjoshua/teenagers-depression-no-theyre-just-children-db6980e01f51)",19.11,24.852496666666674,10.723333333333336,39.55500000000001,40.66666666666667,14.8,57.83333333333334,13.023866798666859,9.869733333333333,176,11,15,6,2,44,23,24,0.183,0.693,0.124,-0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209250027858164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40646808273373375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5180316426871467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4720524445312584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4905104964143029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SamYeet,2020/04/04,"I don’t like the glorification of depression on Reddit As the title already says, I can’t enjoy many posts on Reddit anymore, as they’re most often glorifying some sort of mental illnesses, especially depression. 
As a person that has dealt with depression and PTSD in the past, I can’t understand how many people want to glamorize these illnesses and make sarcastic posts about them. 
I don’t want to discriminate those people, as it’s probably their way of coping with their illness, but I’d like to hear your opinion on this topic.",11.630510204081638,8.970893581632655,11.303775510204089,57.657295918367346,57.06122448979593,15.10612244897959,41.8469387755102,13.427899808715575,5.702420408163268,433,17,70,13,4,144,66,98,0.147,0.7,0.154,-0.0782,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,3,0,3,7,0,0,4,0,5,3,0,2,0,15,10,8,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,2,8,4,17,10,2,8,0,3,0,0,7,4,0,5,3,46,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007825884788864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804421285929648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.470130998816407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20506703247390887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777798285867776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145076288851138,0.3689305729483876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18335937027488464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736886095928025,0.2522777151324013,0.15886874598338974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485090805897328,0.0,0.1961691994218056,0.0,0.21268582924515028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469123262890327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189412818791757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21463362787622356,0.1444207356821268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fearless962,2020/04/04,"Cannot quit videogames I have tried deleting this game(League of legends) but i cannot stop playing it all [day. In](https://day.In) the past 3 months i gained 10kgs(22lbs),and my life is falling apart.I don't even enjoy playing it , i am like a zombie who cannot control itself.I don't say its the game fault.I am already on an antidepressant for 3 years. I don't know who can help me, who shall i see,what should i do to remove this poison from me?",2.7351923076923086,4.665224208791209,3.1099862637362636,93.02563873626372,76.14285714285714,5.429120879120879,24.561813186813183,5.985473137389443,0.4315153846153845,357,12,76,2,8,110,63,91,0.168,0.691,0.142,-0.3124,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,1,5,1,0,4,0,14,2,0,1,1,6,15,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,1,0,0,8,0,0,2,1,3,0,2,6,1,0,0,0,1,10,4,5,13,1,8,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,6,44,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32419835888477505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295041531449472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789332303285521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940418063440601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969174712181584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145620721395032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20750858952141532,0.1435282040820753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344958821201329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28045042457895336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31247584126390954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23362912351455414,0.0,0.0,0.2341081073504972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456168890062301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19946030344261775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18918750286886854
mentalhealth,orangelatella77,2020/04/04,"I start to wonder if smoking would make me feel more relaxed, even if I don't like the idea of smoking cigarettes at all This may sound weird, but I deal with lots of emotional sadness and anger lately, and I try to push most of it back inside to not let others notice it too much. I am a person that always tried to find a way to make myself feel less shitty, I go outside a lot or watch my favourite shows and so on. I even exercise regularly, but thanks to the whole corona thing that's not as easy as before. I never smoked before but I have the urge to start doing it lately. I just wonder where that comes from? I know it's unhealthy and I don't want to do it, but it won't leave my mind.",4.070748299319733,4.027181517006806,5.0684353741496615,87.81585034013605,70.56462585034014,7.621768707482992,23.816326530612244,6.937597516519254,0.6613755102040817,541,11,121,4,9,178,93,147,0.16899999999999998,0.769,0.062,-0.9523,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,1,0,6,0,10,1,0,2,2,34,23,14,0,4,10,0,2,1,0,3,1,1,0,1,12,6,0,0,7,3,0,3,6,3,0,0,0,4,16,3,17,19,8,13,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,9,7,90,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12884646427649535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906903772751028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635295568568913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13338838294230412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964213746972675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741838659525367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20455211853460653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15659223935072614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415288418979149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800404454236258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17480525428566554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510075704411968,0.0,0.3493519972556272,0.16396234009474045,0.0,0.158343214816447,0.0,0.07565121858945885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26329353445208953,0.0,0.0,0.2067253250084113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15635297325185646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383155967703534,0.0,0.11942880906271433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17629619083415024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352078503502002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21920531369768576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256381332741289,0.0,0.0,0.10287454870889323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21026410958265068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09133373357476847,0.1229116343602058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288296469549247,0.0,0.0,0.3358534662393237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100000234593871,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kevyntheplug,2020/04/04,"I think I truly have bi polar disorder and idk how to bring it up to my parents I’ve always been known to be angry and impatient but always happy and outgoing. But, I always have moments where there’s no in between and I’m just depressed angry and hopeless. I have feelings where there isn’t really any point in anything. I can’t stop crying I can’t help it and it makes me feel like less of a man. Like it takes so little to set me off and it frustrates me almost like I’m me looking at myself in third person cause I can’t help these feelings. I never knew what bi polar disorder was until I watched “Shameless” (great show btw 10/10 would recommend) and I’m slowly realizing that I just have all the traits and symptoms. I feel like one day I’ll actually kill myself or someone if I don’t get help or help myself and it scares me. I’m truly scared of myself",1.587084893882647,3.7686746123595536,3.513857677902621,87.48317103620475,80.96629213483146,5.7533083645443215,21.68664169787765,6.937597516519254,0.6798267166042442,683,21,136,8,18,230,102,178,0.244,0.5710000000000001,0.185,-0.9185,1,0,0,0,0,2,11.0,0,0,0,0,8,12,2,2,2,0,13,3,0,3,2,33,28,18,1,2,7,1,4,4,0,1,1,0,0,2,9,10,0,1,8,1,0,1,7,6,0,2,3,6,22,6,14,23,2,17,0,2,2,2,7,10,0,4,9,89,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.13344070465752406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692760480442026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34134150314025485,0.0,0.0,0.0929894148854698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252721546539098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404719517825238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15020493390955655,0.08818743485702314,0.0,0.1177758942273946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134369164085839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765639484700823,0.19537737260750346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144217856530037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15075880654844726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556466125264528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666217745053244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15128503273223726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672214128417087,0.13705165177893153,0.0,0.0,0.11482904539037354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127650956736598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546404832197916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09266008332605688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183607940290794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939805290494415,0.0,0.0,0.12926561940429016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760058287308761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738056818720274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586125943900533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432263874161225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212754899370916,0.10281314956658408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761890842677662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09713776667945934,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NxghtmareChan,2020/04/04,"I’m confused on my mental health. Follow the titles so you know what I’m talking about in the sections so you don’t get overwhelmed from a huge amount of text.

(Intro)

I’ve had mental health problems since I was little (My doctor told me I showed signs of anxiety at the age of 5-6.) I clearly know I probably have anxiety, although I’ve never been taken to a psychiatrist/therapist/ any mental health professionals in my life. That’s the one disorder I know I have. The rest of it, I could describe as a garbage fire.

(Some backstory to certain stuff)

2018 was a very rough year for me. I blame myself and the fact I was unmoderated online at such an age, but also it’s complicated since I was skillful at hiding the fact I was online, and doing this crazy stuff. I don’t blame my parents, or moderators of community’s, since it’s hard to tell a liar from a truthful person if they are good at lying. Anyway, I basically messed up myself and my mental health during the summer of 2018 (Late June to The Middle of August.) I showed very strong signs of narcissism, depression, bipolar, and others I don’t know how to describe. It was often me having one behavior, people calling out that behavior in a negative way, and me being the easily moldable and easily influenced by others opinions of me kind of person, I often became worse and developed worse behaviors by convincing myself I was worse that what they had called me. At the time I was a younger mind and as moldable as a piece of freshly bought air-dry clay. Let’s just say the word toxic was an understatement of how I was at the time. I think being young and online is not a good mix, and I don’t recommend for parents letting their child be online under the age of 13 because, even if it seems like they’re ok and don’t have anything going on, they probably do. I don’t think forcing your child to let you check their phone is going to help either, it’s stressful for the kid and is very toxic as a parent. If your worried about your kid doing stupid things online, then don’t give them access to being online in the first place. Kids are better at lying and are smarter at hiding things than you think they are. I often root it back to the parents fault, even if they think it’s not. They need to understand the fact their kid can access a lot more than you think.

(Recovery from that backstory)

But from that summer, I became a sort of emotionally numb by the time my phone was finally taken away from me, since one of my “friends” online had told my mom what was going on and my mom took my phone away. I’m thankful she did that, since the internet can be a toxic wasteland that can mess up the mind of even the strongest people. If you ever are feeling sad and it’s not due to in-real-life factors, I suggest turning your phone off for two weeks. It’s what I had to do, not by choice. I didn’t want to at the time, but I appreciate it now. It was causing mental harm being online for a whole summer and never leaving my room. I had no phone for two weeks, and I got creative and learned new skills. I became happier. I wasn’t as numb anymore, and I soon became kind of happy. When I got my phone back I made sure to be careful not to trigger myself to being the way I used to be. 

(Illness one?) Narcisism

If your wondering, I believe I might have a narcissistic disorder, since when I’m in like a large group chat or even a group of people and I’m “being ignored” and nobody’s talking to me, I get a sharp feeling in my gut and now that I feel it and understand it, I immediately isolate myself to prevent the harm of others. I’m glad I can identify these triggers. The feeling is horrible, and the only way I can describe it in words is like this: Imagine you have a stomach ache but it won’t make you vomit, and it’s lingering and frustrating until you act on it or you got to sleep.

(Illness two) Disassociation

I think I might be experiencing a dissociative disorder of a sort. I often fall into episodes where I feel like I’m reading my life from one big book, and I can see everything around me but I just don’t feel there. For example, when I read books I often fall into the characters and the story, and picture it so vividly I can see it, but when I snap out of it, it’s like I got ripped from a reality. In my English classes when I read books, I sometimes get up and I feel like and outsider watching my life from my eyes, but I don’t feel there. It’s like I’m looking from the inside of my head, at the world, instead of experiencing it. I used to think I had DID but I could never think of a cause of why I would have it, and I don’t have blackouts or amnesia or time loss, so I cut that option from the table. When I was younger, I often used to think “Ok, I know I’m reading my life from a story book or I’m dreaming. I just want to wake up. I want to look away from the pages, this doesn’t feel real.” That’s as much as I can think right now for that.

(Illness three) Depression/Bi-Polar Stuff 

I know I had pretty bad depression during the 2018 stuff. I recall being suicidal at points and just experiencing a lot of symptoms of depression. I remember everytime I tried to get help, it just made myself worse. I often tried to get help but every time I was stopped by a thought that didn’t feel like my own, and I forced myself back into the toxic cycle. I haven’t mentioned this previously, but before the Summer of 2018, in March-April I experienced a rough episode of depression. School was an influence on it. I recently had a close friend move away, I got rejected by a guy who I was attached to deeply (I have attachment issues), and people at school were ignoring me. I felt alone. I sat at a table for lunch everyday with “friends” but they never felt like friends, and we didn’t hang out, and we barely talked. All of this lead to a downward spiral. I wrote some poems, accidentally left them home one day, my mother found them, confronted me, and I shocked myself back to happiness out of the fear I would get in trouble for being depressed. Then it came back and hit me that summer. But I’m considering I have a form of bipolar, due to the fact I can have Rapid episodes of switching to happy to sad to extreme anger. It’s rough. 

(illness number idk) Schizophrenia 

I sometimes voices, but not full voices. They’re like full thoughts not coming from me, but they just feel like a bunch of thoughts that I’m not thinking, but I experience them. I can tell distinct ones from another. Certain ones go into certain subjects. One that used to be reoccurring often talked about boys I saw, and talked about looks. It often would insult them inside My head if it didn’t like them, like “Oh —- Looks cute today, but he’s still a f—king dumb—s.” Another talked about girls, only positively though, and it was like a sweet motherly tone it spoke in. There’s others, but it’s weird to explain them. But visual stuff is horrifying. I have a horrifying case of arachnophobia. I sometimes feel my skin crawl, I get feelings like somethings crawling in my skin, like a bug. My brain is as bad as to put a spider in my vision, and it’s there. Sometimes it gets stuck in my mind and every time I close my eyes I see another spider, and soon enough, there everywhere. I sometimes ignore it but it’s horrifying. I also have tricked myself into seeing black shadow-like figures. I saw one once and It made my entire body cold and I froze in place. I often don’t think I could have it since I know everyone who has schizophrenia has it way worse. But a lot of the “voices” for me have kind of gone away due to me recently getting a loving and helpful boyfriend, who is helpful. With him I haven’t had as many episodes of depression lately. I’m really thankful for him. 

(Conclusion)

Anyway, If you can recognize if I’m wrong on anything or if you think I might have something of just anything, please just let me know in the comments. I would love feedback since I’m just really really confused, since it’s hard for me to judge my mental state and understand it. By the way, I’m not trying to self diagnose, I just want and idea of what’s going on. I’m unable to visit any kind of doctor, counsellor, therapist, or any health professional at all so my last hope is the internet.

Thank you for reading this huge amount of text!",3.727188861985472,5.116811378934624,4.921382857142857,83.31785443099274,72.31719128329297,7.731920581113801,26.472658595641647,8.264220228388037,1.6797151999999995,6506,219,1292,101,125,2150,524,1652,0.149,0.7120000000000001,0.14,-0.9772,6,2,2,0,1,0,200.0,2,18,18,8,68,89,8,5,86,2,126,37,12,18,18,265,255,117,1,24,58,8,25,16,4,8,22,5,2,12,84,67,1,5,52,13,2,18,35,40,0,15,64,51,209,49,195,161,23,162,0,11,15,2,107,77,0,45,77,902,293,19,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031293427899829966,0.0,0.04832554072539618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06164131491859692,0.09504857932755836,0.04622848953857656,0.0,0.029964969733353206,0.0,0.0,0.07459263545165959,0.02689758427589482,0.0,0.0,0.14193902964704466,0.11616660825358725,0.0504562037962305,0.018418665995817568,0.0,0.02571057546017514,0.03404174087014041,0.0,0.026722541545190544,0.0,0.033561839304561546,0.0,0.033729717417684706,0.06170539263916201,0.03455769006477938,0.03080600960223022,0.06207785999242457,0.0,0.02602738095910221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237219472757342,0.0,0.0,0.019486051004049727,0.0,0.15614381475207226,0.030667393242018476,0.0,0.0,0.10388636005104296,0.06185227086100605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03398759124351038,0.0,0.031219972714503483,0.0,0.07982638064357467,0.027331022898833282,0.05091455635807141,0.028871543060316064,0.027155120405703077,0.029555879161039793,0.0,0.0340000582617826,0.1986076865388688,0.12951278559715965,0.0580219063597645,0.033098844346297666,0.0,0.0257006995277742,0.0,0.033128976495423484,0.09337554021653363,0.0,0.14207390699806752,0.02898479622272152,0.0858588560233394,0.05068549341362585,0.12082770727084804,0.0,0.0,0.02991740944513976,0.0,0.09649267216429436,0.05413306482948469,0.0,0.062018218218905075,0.16058463546950666,0.0,0.0,0.10126174166405393,0.0,0.030307915137686683,0.030010121061421337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034108839515010016,0.0,0.03153640861275965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258562882737243,0.13284214259968108,0.024629100545014642,0.06816723706237902,0.031993118099629105,0.032828476377373045,0.12358674971265632,0.08536644739627193,0.23618285704533465,0.030283174480392982,0.0,0.0,0.10149131285430343,0.0,0.0,0.07706264564527895,0.054540086238014256,0.08576994327050078,0.020168618395409413,0.030633072050054805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18269651406100199,0.09615940674389292,0.09152502584894348,0.0707744339168017,0.0,0.03211355828534065,0.022211359816577736,0.02240389665236213,0.09321408783586982,0.029181649027242164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032177783511655435,0.2047433529117156,0.04595944474005223,0.0,0.0,0.13419987064129385,0.0,0.0,0.08378857151917507,0.05276480833039407,0.06313608515874053,0.033166784915984286,0.028562759046862982,0.0,0.0,0.03073932129226401,0.06515334494363438,0.0289114898450909,0.0,0.030374226572931238,0.0,0.0,0.15111491853682196,0.06878213080290724,0.0580691374667032,0.0,0.05966695384110592,0.0,0.03422748647794117,0.025803280216429008,0.0,0.024028027380384696,0.0,0.061157995857650464,0.09630915750171637,0.027506425641877552,0.03152063346353868,0.0,0.0,0.22494600636186346,0.0,0.030236627923814006,0.0,0.0,0.04652166941419589,0.14941608431696676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024129584021198174,0.025260931708109387,0.03461095950679825,0.0,0.17294362679561712,0.03305009496203288,0.0,0.028477098162678224,0.03140475367337927,0.0,0.14571310483065034,0.052818146443786365,0.08345320481304308,0.0,0.07016343981776113,0.04014675058172392,0.2516855692286381,0.02968589461733552,0.07196154555460263,0.12332947921733453,0.0,0.028640104254897263,0.05774308612063213,0.03356976249218468,0.061541612111391975,0.032865033780479405,0.08854642861129583,0.094364039481167,0.0,0.10438356888271053,0.0,0.07479114075158866,0.07128590438631734,0.11991553766652525,0.04847299153562764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027264163841557672,0.03373375315161365,0.0,0.0,0.0327666694783565,0.0,0.030684603323929624,0.1539573490525456,0.08585492838086257,0.03303514842021072,0.0,0.019457345174162744
mentalhealth,KunkleGrunkle,2020/04/04,Please help Past 6 years felt like ive been in a fog i'm 19 i cant remember the last time i expierenced genuine emotion my entire life is blurry and the same.goes for the day to day i cant remember anything i fear the worst i just want my mind back,0.10933333333333196,2.1389563272727297,2.3595454545454544,94.47265151515153,85.72727272727272,5.848484848484849,21.89393939393939,7.1686216300943375,0.6289393939393939,198,7,46,3,6,67,41,55,0.102,0.6859999999999999,0.212,0.6031,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,5,0,5,1,0,0,0,7,8,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,1,8,1,3,6,1,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,8,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943344153932285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18158765754674347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045992656458997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26564118434501505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657386244217581,0.0,0.0,0.226744634724686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342116188060424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15828888132585384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19249682601085694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668023781620743,0.1153727941066794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23844796854953895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254354765950789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25922590285596425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5350323287114002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377031512523061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928960081793512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15207527297955434
mentalhealth,S11ME,2020/04/04,"Meds sucked Just got a little triggered.. 
I remember a few years ago I was on antidepressants and I couldn’t stop fucking crying! I went into these episodes where I would cry for hours, and the only relief was sleeping. God I was so exhausted.. 

I didn’t eve remember it until now, I think I just pushed back all the memories of my shit because I’m “better now”. 

I just wanted to type it out lol, never told anyone anything in school now all I want to do is talk about it.",1.0836555023923466,3.488093231578951,2.807655502392347,90.31540669856459,85.10526315789474,5.559808612440191,20.215311004784688,6.980632752743323,0.5076315789473687,367,11,75,5,11,121,69,95,0.161,0.713,0.126,-0.6581,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,11,6,3,0,4,1,8,4,2,1,3,19,17,4,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,3,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,7,0,12,2,10,8,3,19,0,0,0,1,2,6,3,0,11,53,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661901233852595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109070270073847,0.0,0.15428045118962802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441609077840951,0.0,0.1142863534559257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658112389337968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4118769824461172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733226720917301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994525731191327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18463049639043536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879046823054156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082485360374679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445964950977039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258734447414426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4247576473143235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18974024320845576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1924460067302059,0.0,0.0,0.187615864634334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15674206647075056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15068969893202866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201299140738391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914562193366906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22116167552443736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17379627256939556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13318074573229846,0.0,0.0,0.12073127491389787
mentalhealth,principessa143,2020/04/04,"I don’t know how to fix me There’s something wrong with me. Some extra hurdle that I have to get over that “normal” people don’t. I’ve been diagnosed with a cluster of things, depression, anxiety, ptsd, complex ptsd, bipolar disorder, they’ve dabbled with borderline personality disorder, now I’m wondering if ADHD isn’t part of my cluster mystery diagnosis. I feel like in some ways I suffer greatly, and in others I’m really not that bad. I struggle with food, but not enough to consider it a disorder. My self esteem is through the floor, I grew up in an emotionally abusive and emotionally neglectful home, and I can never seem to do anything right. I was in an abusive relationship with a narcissist for almost 3 years. In every possible way I feel very “low end severe,” like it’s definitely there, but it’s just not there enough for me to be taken seriously. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know how to proceed, I don’t know who to talk to, I just know there is something wrong and I’m not operating how I should. I have goals, I know what I want I know how I want to be, where I want to be, etc. I just have absolutely no follow through for a hundred different reasons and I’ll never be able to be an independent, functional adult. I’m constantly using my roommates as therapists, I can’t deal with aloneness, and I can’t stop using unhealthy coping mechanisms.

I need to figure out how to fix me. I feel inept, incapable, immature, lazy, lacking, behind the curve, all of the above and more. 

I have no idea what to do.",5.304736842105264,5.844738933333336,6.773228070175443,74.62468421052634,68.0,10.315789473684212,32.78947368421053,10.307518312809881,3.4087999999999994,1200,51,229,30,19,412,149,300,0.212,0.7340000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.9943,1,1,2,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,0,1,14,12,0,1,10,0,26,3,0,9,3,63,51,16,0,8,10,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,1,3,12,14,1,2,16,0,0,2,16,9,0,0,3,3,33,3,39,42,10,24,0,4,0,0,7,12,0,6,10,162,45,1,0.0967877534049761,0.22935532186867374,0.0,0.0,0.11632007088176302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691895407307076,0.10024292286838933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404236643507582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796480742012417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08081373126599448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459317695144514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978392382454007,0.08336315018322156,0.09823753233984714,0.0,0.1011226020849904,0.33278145209943605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177463906102832,0.08572522138959249,0.2000152445293598,0.10794392973370737,0.0,0.0,0.08154785666526715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14681638880446035,0.06914519037162249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703613560552845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05056760638689669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670883981977193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708600825623588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926159254838286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723441263706456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457121475081327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176689275661949,0.1492973644032959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483144835102723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481170503987372,0.0,0.06710044149633433,0.08451133299554213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091136493369318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22627940854583425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06200471322329688,0.09951393047788164,0.0,0.10391382535139687,0.0,0.08265621256854967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881119356060957,0.100970735426062,0.10934261180892417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490238823859013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809188957152699,0.0,0.10118357473315873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779432993198215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11237804161861922,0.0643014826445728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16718708601900412,0.0,0.07986003299264728,0.17126377392742767,0.1536512271075581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496218987855732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116444287045312,0.0,0.06232813988165933
mentalhealth,Idkwtd5,2020/04/04,"Am I crazy or does this poison exist? Please someone answer. Is there a poison that can cause mental disorders or that can obfuscate your mind, like going into psychosis state where you no longer know what is real and what is not? Or cause a brain damage that can go unnoticed.

The reason i ask this is because i think I've been poisoined by something like that (not even sure if that poison exists or could it exists) by a close person of mine that im not in a good relationship with anymore.

Or am i just being paranoid. I really cant find any answer to this so im freakin out and would like to get an answer from someone who knows something about poisons.",5.643692307692309,6.033533176923079,5.90596153846154,81.66278846153847,67.23076923076923,8.038461538461537,27.788461538461537,7.645422480735847,1.5925384615384608,523,15,99,5,8,167,86,130,0.19899999999999998,0.7170000000000001,0.084,-0.9555,0,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,0,0,6,10,4,0,6,0,14,5,1,3,1,31,21,9,0,3,10,0,0,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,13,6,0,0,8,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,1,0,8,5,11,17,0,8,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,6,3,69,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119286868275424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215865685426334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15286041246698007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967459221574328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18253199389811425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3359410166716728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054997212913058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18739740393824614,0.0,0.14308929699812803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10799726131786323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14944579828321622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542758107904393,0.0,0.18585377386570487,0.1371449997628519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532391836046089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17972238591675874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23964917542435554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647803062248851,0.0,0.16509917404985336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14277121792827294,0.0,0.17948562411407454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18611094964929836,0.10474912784360348,0.16811621059043155,0.0,0.17554927699208528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770841352660857,0.25175701807658313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410687980862378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047710407773217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615329495113184,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Europeannika,2020/04/04,"I can't stop crying. Lately, I can't stop crying, every day I start crying because of either the smallest things or for no reason at all. I usually cry about three times during the day and in the evening, the tears just come out of nowhere and I don't even know why. During that, I get thoughts that a person shouldn't get (or maybe I should idk). I get this dull worthless feeling and I just wanna go to sleep and never wake up. I also have noticed that I keep getting less patient and get angry at stupid things pretty quickly. I'm constantly low on energy and can't seem to concentrate more than usually (I always struggled in school, because I'm not able to stay concentrated) and when I can't get myself to concentrate I start crying and feel like throwing a tantrum. I'm just not used to being like this, I have struggled with some things in the past and I used to visit a psychologist because of it. Yes, I could be referred to as emotionaly unstable, I have a lot of triggers. But it just keeps getting worse and worse and I don't want to talk to anyone about it because I feel like I'm not worth it.

Does anyone feel like this as well?
Or am I just overdramatic?",4.001083854818525,5.177913293617023,4.814793491864833,85.16411764705884,71.38297872340425,7.401752190237797,27.015018773466835,7.724431198458867,1.4787196495619532,924,31,185,11,17,299,119,235,0.16899999999999998,0.687,0.145,-0.7894,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,13,12,2,2,9,1,15,2,2,4,2,52,42,19,0,5,13,0,4,4,0,2,0,0,0,1,13,14,0,4,9,0,1,4,12,7,1,1,1,4,22,5,29,36,6,29,0,3,0,0,3,9,0,6,19,126,35,1,0.09172174500772584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733498463445246,0.07631983952222385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826795349239548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22365089770500665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07901016172581694,0.0,0.09911862160647253,0.0,0.07323234992235056,0.0,0.5037601498482271,0.11830587515868082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026631715819305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12116269505844693,0.0,0.07727952609543325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18550908082393147,0.19657809888117167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3354457826378341,0.0,0.052127581416333765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16305300264496342,0.0,0.0,0.05040787232538592,0.0,0.10346612348671848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17924244626591387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797854760492759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214682110071128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074146421617737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442581461892853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755878414165226,0.0,0.08008788986811627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331398923541187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430523010300126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282730273807932,0.0,0.08350003182720805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917879853550314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984224641139813,0.0977631762117348,0.0,0.1533669717086575,0.0,0.19177496561600754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372246427925983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18280755531332515,0.0,0.0,0.07281682011779618,0.053483687120739344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584362766253796,0.20203708755096186,0.0,0.05409986163402606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246886410069218,0.0,0.08276460846466004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869445883415428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InvaderAlexKagamine,2020/04/04,"Has anyone else felt like they have lost track of time or day? I know that we are all under quarantine, or at least most of us are. But since last year I keep losing track of days, time, conversations, etc. I keep hearing whispers and I feel like someone is always there watching me while my body feels light and I forget who I'm talking to or later on I forget that I had even talked to that person. 

Has anyone else experienced this? It feels... Weird... 

I have psychosis and many other disorders that I was diagnosed with but I was just wondering if anyone else has experienced this and knows what to do if there is a way?... If not that's okay! Tell me your experiences if any of you may have experienced this.",3.201666666666668,5.164302446043166,4.123183453237413,86.13259292565952,74.89928057553956,7.223261390887291,22.37470023980816,8.07648339933343,1.0559059952038377,556,15,113,9,12,179,88,139,0.07,0.904,0.027000000000000003,-0.5692,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,2,2,1,2,4,6,0,0,1,1,15,2,1,0,1,31,27,14,0,4,11,0,4,2,0,1,1,2,0,1,12,6,0,2,7,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,5,11,18,3,11,21,4,12,0,2,1,0,12,3,0,10,10,80,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305930195416942,0.0,0.0,0.0924000003459118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850219296003088,0.4176615247349755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509270511561717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17525691545279895,0.0,0.0,0.13791077380063227,0.0,0.0,0.15572509634696127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3405196388585623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15153710116778185,0.08974448722605717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291231286890753,0.0,0.0,0.2061082083840657,0.0970694853750367,0.13046178950252835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15314156524894276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24154477755686124,0.0,0.0,0.14934724427567728,0.11075666873188024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276381332982826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200993049956912,0.1483241605863007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775643195279028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11864124689144505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239761888648976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512687143399465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184231623633644,0.1187611772101543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15846019513825615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1634414983181916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785164855583848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735118524642754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749936807143402
mentalhealth,darkrai_28,2020/04/04,"Dealing with quarantine, low self-esteem and work pressure I am a college student and my internship has been recently put up on hold which gave me a sudden blow to my plans and now I have to prepare for upcoming interviews as well as my course work. In quarantine, my ability to work has decreased significantly which degraded my performance. This factor is contributing to my low self-esteem and it feels like I am a retard capable of nothing. Apart from this, I thought making a dating account will help me ease my mind a bit. It did nothing but contribute more and more to my low self-esteem. Now my day is like I get up, work tirelessly only to fail and then get tired beyond imagination. Feels terrible.",7.015909090909092,7.618115893939398,7.472272727272728,70.87840909090909,64.30303030303031,11.44848484848485,36.196969696969695,11.20814326018867,4.3809969696969695,566,26,97,16,8,186,81,132,0.172,0.732,0.09699999999999999,-0.9118,0,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,7,4,10,0,1,5,0,10,1,0,1,0,15,17,10,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,7,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,7,1,0,4,2,16,3,17,12,3,17,0,4,0,0,4,9,0,0,9,67,22,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18337382489246568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832326226791396,0.17316411232452913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16985588237454402,0.11999393342425292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17550912685615694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258312110238664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16411802448832472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211766507094548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16959635000873624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223330995863721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12774463602783642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885080053217932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658447647579898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5256710830961202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13334511904089116,0.0,0.1930505824148324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510203340778168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4891208746974399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ckinify,2020/04/04,"Calling into work So I know the title sounds dumb, but in my line of work (cashier at a pharmacy), I am working a lot as you would image during this time. I've never called in but I had to today for having to catch up on homework from college and having a personal day. The location I work at can demand a lot from their cashiers and I work in a part of town that's not very, expensive, if that makes sense. So the customer base is EXTREMELY difficult to deal with, coming home crying after being nearly threatened by people, treated like trash by co workers or the public all for minimum wage. I've been there for almost 3 years, arguable one of the best at my store.  Anywho I have been covering A LOT of shifts and I do understand the complications oh not having people there, but am I not allowed a day to get my life in order. All while fighting minor congestion. I dont want to come off as complainy, but in this time college students working from home already have a lot of adjustments to make. This college semester I had to take an abnormally large amount of classes (7 to be exact) while also working 30 plus hours a week. I have been lacking in work because of my jobs demand for my presence so I needed today to catch up, but I try to call in and I have like the equivalent of a breakdown, tears and all, this morning after I call in. Why do I feel so guilty and horrible for trying to call in? I never skip work, I never would for that matter and now I cant get the thoughts about how lazy I am out of my mind. I've been almost bed ridden and cant get out of my rut. Not being allowed to leave home due to lockdown, trying to make everyone in my life happy, while also doing the best I can is getting too much it feels like. I'm constantly running and trying to play catch up. My depression, anxiety, stress, self esteem issues all came crashing today and I'm just not feeling anything of joy anymore it seems.",5.400318464144554,5.4776056597402585,6.324234895539246,79.53517221908527,67.72727272727272,8.773574251835122,31.024844720496894,8.456263369488248,2.3187176736307182,1509,55,290,20,23,502,194,385,0.134,0.778,0.08800000000000001,-0.9291,4,1,0,0,2,0,38.0,0,1,1,12,13,14,2,1,20,0,31,3,0,6,8,66,53,30,0,6,13,0,3,3,0,2,3,1,5,2,9,18,0,0,8,1,3,8,11,5,0,1,8,4,32,9,66,40,14,53,0,1,0,0,12,23,1,9,24,212,41,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15062031358304104,0.0,0.08299412801006194,0.12028795398271655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575340734820221,0.0,0.07458633356760096,0.0,0.0,0.06188994726166595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045846225711523414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15785274922905554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3839799471899301,0.08601815457962647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957042409062264,0.0,0.08127335494765946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261268529268477,0.0970061450444654,0.07753636035768209,0.06477671958985654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814345998531878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186466599067416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408258958400075,0.053728759024168016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571727388926588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006053620743242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263198950288153,0.0,0.07406493561815207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849782974074895,0.07463254190324511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041332464407372926,0.0,0.0,0.07963463336292037,0.0,0.0,0.10624356336145856,0.11022879496014742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25575731684244457,0.0,0.0,0.15060618908918094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593885091490889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055286686654827055,0.05576593348156021,0.17401561999878826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096302833579858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08144316058330943,0.0,0.10427980405276116,0.06566890655625733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684667281974227,0.07845856353916943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615074848533487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05654721285126536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05970691653774032,0.08770902211556911,0.0,0.2138657627598668,0.0,0.0,0.20424574650886454,0.0,0.0,0.07829439718176967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062054648273627576,0.04435974982237187,0.0,0.06032748819485025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786371008627028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4927722421944054,0.0,0.0,0.10685150666963343,0.0,0.0,0.04843162033581845
mentalhealth,teddybearinflames,2020/04/04,"Has anyone successfully received Spravado treatments? I’ve been through many many treatments and many many different medications but I’m still struggling. I just started Lithium which seems to be helping but I’ve really wanted to do the Spravdo treatments.

Despite being approved for them by my doctor and insurance I have yet to find a place that will administer them. My psychiatrist who recommended it to me has actually asked the Spravado rep to not come to his office anymore because his patients are all reporting the same problem. His patients are getting approved but can’t find a place that will administer them.

My psychiatrist said it’s mainly a problem with the treatment centers actually getting the drug. I guess the drug is insanely expensive (like $2,000 for one vial which is one treatment) and insurance companies don’t pay for it upfront, the provider has to pay for it first, then get reimbursed. Spravado treatments are like ECT (which I’ve already done), you start them three times a week. So the money really adds up.

Anyway, the treatment center I went to won’t answer my calls. I’ve never heard from anyone about being able to start the treatments and I really want to try it. I’ve been on meds since I was 11 and I’m told by my doctors I have treatment resistant depression, so meds aren’t working well. Has anyone successfully gone through the treatment? For reference, I’m in the US in Michigan.",5.5191014799154345,7.99883842248062,5.7231712473572935,74.91786469344609,69.81395348837209,8.411839323467232,34.983086680761105,9.095868883498916,3.5699860465116284,1155,60,184,24,22,366,136,258,0.09699999999999999,0.83,0.073,-0.8029,2,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,1,1,4,6,8,9,0,1,16,0,25,5,0,0,2,26,45,11,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,3,5,2,0,0,11,8,0,0,5,0,5,4,6,4,1,4,9,2,22,5,26,30,3,22,0,1,0,0,17,8,0,2,12,125,33,8,0.10621963183713368,0.0,0.20731007661388348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721600505074585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10534133271593134,0.2228137089299362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930101717141404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475050167293821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846212017250974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149880749872086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09148681325617204,0.0,0.0,0.11097690757360233,0.0,0.21744058819297926,0.0,0.10869956203786492,0.0,0.0,0.2463621008597125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19416563833651831,0.09035036457834184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16648612074381836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11701289977578347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119678020668638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378709350955384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4307601394096003,0.0,0.0,0.2359721309382953,0.10700510420387932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192312830538934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439543430370409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22195381514720466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20327568478702931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20414104819196188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103919392805392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966983634941519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786597709906561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22554840637130386,0.0,0.08482713519462698,0.0,0.0,0.11104382195081157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06193752151988456,0.0,0.0,0.10149741016270172,0.0,0.07211615757765995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776913862175587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530218182661246,0.0,0.08520298159032494,0.0,0.09550420548654286,0.09846666288197672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732915704714281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anaftc,2020/04/04,"Is it smart to go to your psychiatrist in the middle of this crisis? 
So I was supposed to schedule my next appointment by now, to see how I’m dealing with the medication she prescribed. But now, not sure if I should just continue to take them and schedule the next appointment when all is better. I go to a hospital for my psychiatrist so not sure if I should schedule it or not. 

Tldr: should I continue to take the antidepressants until this whole covid situation improves and I get to see my psychiatrist again?",6.561580756013748,7.222033422680415,7.3809793814433,70.93923539518903,65.28865979381443,11.00274914089347,34.723367697594504,10.864195022040775,3.9345615120274933,410,18,74,11,6,137,57,97,0.091,0.825,0.084,-0.1923,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,1,8,4,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,1,3,18,14,11,0,5,8,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,2,12,4,14,10,2,16,0,0,2,0,4,2,0,3,12,60,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986909039779558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316115536757751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11737403613761098,0.0,0.25535555723906456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22631834254330116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4778506422611444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580451644730505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525239367256198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4234732214406349,0.0,0.3378282850548765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508215731250176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lieslxx,2020/04/04,"what do I do? I’ve struggled with mental health issues my entire life. I’ve gone to multiple therapists over the last decade but I’ve never actually been diagnosed or even seen a psychiatrist. The past few months I’ve been the worst I’ve ever been. After weeks of trying to get an appointment to see a psychiatrist I finally got one, but it was almost a month away. Finally it was a few days before my appointment and it was then cancelled due to COVID. Because of the uncertainty of when things will be back to normal there’s no way of knowing when that appointment will be rescheduled. Not only was my mental health already the worst ever, but a couple days ago I learned I lost a close friend of mine to suicide. I’m afraid that the pain and grief that I’m feeling on top of the pain I was already feeling will push me over the edge. Is there somewhere I can go for help? I don’t know if I want to be admitted somewhere because I don’t want to be there for a long time. Also I’m not sure how I would even go about trying to get in somewhere. Any advice/opinions would be appreciated.",4.451917808219179,5.3698903561643805,5.460164383561644,81.92010958904113,70.0958904109589,8.397077625570777,28.298630136986297,8.648137234880735,1.99666794520548,864,30,173,14,15,285,117,219,0.196,0.71,0.094,-0.9836,0,0,0,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,0,2,14,10,0,2,16,0,24,6,0,1,4,28,43,12,2,6,7,0,2,0,1,5,6,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,6,0,0,4,6,8,0,1,12,4,15,2,25,21,4,33,0,2,2,0,3,7,0,3,21,117,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.11808416681464184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726430548395463,0.0,0.1211697897485798,0.0,0.26706573109878884,0.0967682628368508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08228806650499518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136888951185568,0.09304596047233532,0.0,0.14752797675377313,0.0,0.10296698956580656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389057226526407,0.0,0.15607740974297854,0.0,0.0,0.12281829960798135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598463269625134,0.21891327590127901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12236829650245636,0.0,0.0,0.2651117915057567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348875028166986,0.0,0.12644103091268696,0.0,0.13754072437594606,0.0,0.09677936064160728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572469295435196,0.0,0.0,0.0811076104732742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12629857552596824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13300320263297966,0.09863584511213612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546994710345186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708629008400404,0.0,0.0,0.1320920816550962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438906911563449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19317128690440669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09332710215344207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185599531912407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199663486950698,0.0920303334775492,0.25751732111404485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11551369034499652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642592433346586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650149388924478,0.0,0.1323606617975471,0.0,0.1140464970892162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404970142890628,0.0803908503458531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055943196491697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16430993650717887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14274466521577073,0.09604874021441356,0.09706352200096577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191804066110014,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LDLV1986,2020/04/04,"Motivational Advice/Idea: write down a list of everything bad in your life and everything good in your life *^(Idk if I'm allowed to post advice but here goes.)*

The other day, something happened to me that made me feel very upset: I sent an application to a university and it got rejected. This caused me to feel very bad about myself and think of myself as a failure. I was quite miserable for the rest of the day.

Now, many of you have probably heard of writing down your emotions as a way to better your mental health. I came up with a twist on this: rather than writing down my emotions, **I decided to write down all the things that are** ***bad*** **in my life and all the things that are** ***good*** **in my life.**

Using my list as an example, I first wrote down the bad: university application got rejected, currently unemployed, currently quarantined, currently single, etc. In other words, I wrote down all the stuff I was upset about.

After that, I wrote down the good: financially stable, physically healthy, mentally healthy, living in a decent country, family/friends still love me, etc. This allowed me to see that there are more positives in my life then I realize.

Writing all of this helped me calm down and become more optimistic. It made me realize that my life is better than I give it credit for and that I have many positive things to be thankful for. And thus I ceased to be upset.

I highly recommend this tactic to anyone who is depressed, anxious, or otherwise feeling down. Writing down all of the negative influences in your life will help you realize what is making you upset, while writing down all of the positive influences will open your eyes to all the good things in life and possibly cheer you up.",2.3197806137080583,5.244109678233436,3.4866496988815605,82.89714977057645,87.86435331230284,7.298221967307142,24.23924577000287,8.224198915089428,2.1997261829653,1356,54,240,35,44,437,142,317,0.145,0.6629999999999999,0.193,0.9579,7,3,1,0,0,0,69.0,0,10,0,5,7,23,0,5,19,0,14,11,1,11,7,52,36,16,0,2,4,0,3,0,0,2,9,1,0,0,24,11,0,0,9,0,1,2,1,12,0,1,12,6,38,11,54,20,13,40,0,4,2,1,27,25,0,2,11,182,62,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687669919194864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10043706921058287,0.0,0.062164272944267324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969270327843285,0.0,0.09818831875849264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572580648657947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168335703826772,0.0,0.09132967495727788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467242618337505,0.0,0.07657353657507092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20001176981483704,0.0,0.0,0.19830460901139385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15980372521741248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348587486584798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562234053598876,0.0,0.0,0.06868759440142523,0.0,0.0,0.08528554360756407,0.0,0.2982763670706812,0.14221051089359465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861818263752315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450159887826497,0.0,0.0,0.1191819686170168,0.0939327565441415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003626486626944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5023684704279747,0.0,0.0,0.07850452887707464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024001389332039,0.16824766061963492,0.059344615378651815,0.18027093805203886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791901680358099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022675486683638,0.08514618126586376,0.0,0.09585436445147544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456115213320146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708455804622969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844322511418616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099945345343027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177467601559684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185155513466959,0.0,0.0,0.2362574793439844,0.05696657820429433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678516477615317,0.0,0.14671147008740665,0.0,0.07056845760306446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatttguy888,2020/04/04,"Be well -simple. Less is more Just a simple post. If asked to, social distance. You don't need to be ill to do this. Pickup the phone, use social media to connect . If doctor has ok'd, do some light walking distancing fr others. Simple excercise if your doctor has ok'd.

Less contact now will help us more in longrun.   I've been triggered lately by few things. Not a big religious person but prayed thanked God and then felt calm.

Hope this helped a bit. I'm not a professional or expert at this at all. Just giving my two cents",1.2837394957983186,3.945828774509806,2.4063305322128885,90.78705882352942,89.68627450980392,4.4829131652661065,19.050420168067227,6.1826913282559595,0.12728907563025205,413,12,78,4,14,131,78,102,0.017,0.8,0.182,0.9509,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,2,0,0,4,4,0,0,5,0,10,3,0,2,1,17,18,7,0,5,9,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,3,0,1,1,2,2,4,4,8,13,8,9,1,0,0,0,12,4,0,6,3,53,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19168867833973985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22385519576978052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4197429206206216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19687461831557115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19669711153303326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748736536365193,0.0,0.0,0.2036551881952121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23129882522421474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203770020469204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17903671479060934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19637569516034686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4180335461673258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18877718061526672,0.0,0.0,0.1362222769513878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002984209442716,0.0,0.2466429651242476,0.17709238261474602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843593897331438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LoyalOne0000,2020/04/04,The more I explore myself the worse my mental state becomes. Has anyone else experienced this,5.236875000000001,8.797568937500003,5.230000000000004,71.81500000000003,78.375,5.7,26.75,7.1686216300943375,2.0601,77,3,10,1,2,24,15,16,0.18100000000000002,0.8190000000000001,0.0,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978663319792304,0.4364832788695182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4704791509106963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3558650239156273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42930380708724064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4341263526588024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Blowback_,2020/04/04,"Coronavirus/gun background checks 
Hello all, I'm looking for some info that I cant neccesarily find when googling, maybe somebody can offer some insight...I used to be heavily depressed since I was a child, hospitalized twice in my mid 20s due to suicide attempts...I can say now I'm a lot better mentally in my mid 30s,however this corona crisis has got me wondering how bad things will get n if I should buy something to protect my house n family...with that being said,since I was hospitalized in California, since moved to Washington (not that it matters) will I still be able to pass a background check n purchase a gun for home defense in worst case scenarios?

Please any help would be grateful.",6.891851145038168,7.527580122137407,7.009990458015268,73.97010019083974,64.57251908396947,10.21412213740458,36.22232824427481,10.125756701596842,3.763358015267176,560,26,98,12,8,180,93,131,0.162,0.726,0.111,-0.872,1,0,1,2,0,1,20.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,1,0,4,0,14,0,0,2,1,15,21,3,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,1,6,0,0,2,3,0,4,2,2,4,0,1,3,2,9,1,11,10,5,12,0,1,1,0,5,6,0,5,4,56,15,0,0.19246247653194745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088108386126288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069812874116074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17021742019524916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16576764901893684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17590721679845148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055370039216648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15392982426442964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12900354108447604,0.0,0.1930555563926912,0.0,0.0,0.22207585741112895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162000737349094,0.0,0.0,0.16362471502416995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19335442639142308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939569086866152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045571539434752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126600383508887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830758886455364,0.15305388621637298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4776208483187458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14816701730015375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537007823723293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21052271140196754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786351742940916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166225785222756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20871734589931135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671982131007762,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iamhewhothrowsaway,2020/04/04,"Is sadness physically debilitating? Lately, when I'm sad (if that's even the word to describe my feelings), I get very physically weak. I move slowly and painstakingly. I don't have the energy to do things. It wasn't always like this. I don't know if it's normal. It's scary.",1.0816623376623369,3.632227036363641,3.7797402597402616,81.95818181818184,87.72727272727272,6.779220779220778,20.584415584415584,7.957251820313856,1.2919870129870126,217,7,43,5,7,76,39,55,0.3,0.7,0.0,-0.9359999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,0,7,10,4,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,1,5,1,2,9,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,26,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3218882935235427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555092712145973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19560183116654803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20211196762562766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21260139047129767,0.0,0.4363810790893748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18899425600442854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4111579058172087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3790286309454571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570044363797961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191898837231484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,covidyagames,2020/04/04,"I need help so badly... But there is no help for me. This world is so fucked. If there's a God he's a sadistic piece of shit. I'm sssooooo mentally and physically ill. I am self-diagnosed with psychosis from leaving bipolar disorder untreated for so long. I'm ssssoooooo severely angry and anxious and depressed and miserable. I'm a severe hypochondriac like I've never seen before. I haven't gotten a full night of restful REM sleep in years. I wake up every couple hours and stay awake for a couple hours. I'm 99.9999% certain I have cancer. The terrible pains I have throughout my entire body in the scariest places can't possibly mean anything besides terminal illness and I'm so afraid to die. I'm beyond petrified by doctors because I'd rather live with 99.9999999% certainty that I'm dying than to be put in that situation where they tell me I'm 100% dying and tell me the horrifying-sounding disease names I have and give me an expiration date. I would then just sit in a corner rocking back n forth in terrorizing anticipation of that date. I'm so afraid of this illness going around and I just know that if I catch it my inevitable premature demise will be that much sooner and that much more painful and excruciating. I'm spending every day freaking out about catching this damn virus. I just hate how fucked up this life and world is. I didn't ask to be born. I'm stuck in a toxic relationship with a bitch who's also mentally ill and gives 0 fucks about me or anyone but herself and taunts me about my mental illness. I could go on for years about how fucked my life is. I just want to be cured and live a long happy life and help the world. Now that I would even be a tiny bit possibly willing to see a dr about my preexisting conditions, I'm even more afraid that if I leave the house I'll catch the virus. I live in an apt complex and have a dog that I have to walk several times a day and I'm so scared to. I hate this shit. I just want all the bad shit to go away. I want to be cured and healthy and utilize my full potential to help people. I have so many ideas on how to help make the world an even slightly better place but I can't do shit with this crippling mental and physical illness. Sorry for being selfish and coming here to complain about my problems instead of trying to help others. I'm just so useless in this current, miserable state. What can I do? I also have severe pill anxiety. Pills are so unnatural and kill you with a million other symptoms and illness than the ones theyre meant to treat, etc. Sorry I'll shut up now and continue wallowing in my hopelessness. I hope you all are doing better than me. I don't wish this on my worst enemies.

tl;dr- I'm severely mentally and physically ill. I am 99.9% certain I'm dying of cancer and I'm terrified of it. I'm terrified of this virus and that would be 100% death if I catch it, which seems inevitable from all the grim news I keep hearing. I just want to stop being so mentally and physically ill. But my crippling fear of doctors and pills is far too great to overcome. ",3.5856157635467985,5.289739614121508,4.680459770114948,83.64266009852219,73.22003284072251,7.730049261083742,27.86371100164204,8.418075326091056,1.9728765188834152,2431,94,478,42,49,796,269,609,0.29600000000000004,0.615,0.08900000000000001,-0.9994,1,0,0,0,0,1,58.0,0,2,1,2,43,44,13,8,27,0,40,35,7,4,6,87,89,55,6,17,17,0,0,1,0,5,24,1,0,0,27,38,0,2,6,1,1,10,7,35,0,2,5,3,52,9,66,69,14,65,0,6,2,4,21,31,10,7,22,304,79,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096647807832394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04622692375750498,0.06826595127763392,0.0,0.04225236022294981,0.0,0.04972673930892482,0.05379334648367752,0.05649161851191909,0.0,0.0567736888416641,0.046465069453981364,0.1009089896409062,0.0368360842935655,0.0,0.051419409261351835,0.0,0.0,0.10688654575966228,0.06597125313224991,0.06712140509799458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05205299879849815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04824649563112757,0.13372390822680624,0.0,0.07794156400869476,0.0,0.052046175362105374,0.06133270904545603,0.2508570992249717,0.0,0.06925522758019646,0.12370035178996308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673927110941407,0.11973551532877068,0.0,0.10182566371534664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799781332706495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22345724983234028,0.0,0.11593525797519046,0.10302713753133938,0.0,0.0,0.06662160652206818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06432626927419625,0.0,0.1193194251418685,0.0,0.0,0.06810626034016251,0.0,0.2430199485129285,0.0,0.0,0.060018209208508574,0.11901796360706768,0.06972529976092713,0.0,0.06821536846457353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053710798493382284,0.06685415037513191,0.0,0.033209410793178976,0.0,0.0,0.1279681379096122,0.0,0.0,0.1280453339907469,0.02952185717736238,0.0,0.16007594762127805,0.10695299142625013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04033587054929814,0.06126406898647909,0.0,0.0658233359809007,0.0,0.0,0.3653806520852175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884243002875017,0.04480627564331425,0.046605465315045294,0.0,0.0,0.05670717864457014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0409472836312672,0.0,0.12859838460934525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04189286678007287,0.0,0.12626789341862232,0.0,0.0,0.1362460059464553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057821021198178175,0.0,0.06074639556667241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06487659313376717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060498536764825125,0.0,0.048152947732222916,0.0550109879721459,0.06303913168918689,0.3413297563881696,0.248112118779178,0.0,0.06792311771158795,0.060471207589502175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528742912816893,0.0,0.0644077468357337,0.0,0.05052015221651861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280737995867601,0.0,0.0,0.10563271493576153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03523580056823774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04102635177835203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256697979721836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948872045995996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877803065000568,0.0,0.0,0.07782674457826765
mentalhealth,sexualpropaganda,2020/04/04,"I'm going mad I don't know what this is. Might delete later.

I'm a young woman in my twenties. I have suffered from anxiety and recurring depression my entire life. I have had several stress burnouts. This is by far the worst.

I haven't slept for a month. I wake up several times a night with my heart beating, my body pumped with adrenaline and with lots of anxious thoughts that just feel like I'm falling deeper and deeper into a dark hole. I can't be alone for a second. My partner was staying with me, but now he has to work and he has night shifts. I'm staying in my mom's house. Sometimes I sleep next to her in her bed holding her had, because of the anxiety attacks. Or I sit with her dog who calms me down. I can't take care of my studies. I'm such a fucking baby.

All day I'm a zombie. I have to be put on leave from my study, but every time I sit down to fix it my heart starts pounding, I get a headache and I feel disoriented, så I end up giving up. I used to cry daily, but now it's like there aren't tears left and all I can do is shake and out my face in my hands. 

Sometimes my skin is buzzing and tingling. I can't keep a normal conversation. I can't keep any focus. I have zero thoughts. 

I don't want to get into it, but this is all due to a medical problem. So on top of this, I'm I'm daily physical pain. I have lost all life quility as I can't do most physical things. I used to love sports. Haven't done any for weeks. I'm unable too. Can hardly take a shower or brush my hair. 

I have treatened to kill myself more than once due to this. I even started telling my partner how much I loved him and how I want him to move on from me when I'm no longer here. He convinced me to contact a hotline, which is probably why I'm still alive. Don't even want to think about what would happen, if I was alone in my apartment right now. 

I'm not looking for pity. I just wanted to get it off my chest. So desperate at this point that I'm holding fucking crystals and I'm not even spiritual. 

I do have a therapist that I am in contact with. Will soon get to tell him where I am. 

If you read this, thank you.",0.5451535087719286,2.3875479451754416,2.5168245614035096,95.06677192982457,82.70614035087719,5.544561403508772,21.75614035087719,6.640361216903883,0.28729771929824555,1637,53,385,17,45,547,216,456,0.14300000000000002,0.7609999999999999,0.096,-0.9386,1,2,0,0,0,1,51.0,0,2,0,5,21,22,5,2,15,0,43,20,11,4,4,59,91,24,1,9,12,1,6,2,2,3,5,0,2,3,19,19,0,4,6,2,0,5,14,14,0,2,9,8,62,8,55,77,9,57,0,4,1,4,25,26,2,7,24,246,81,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19015892872432705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485738163723675,0.0,0.14045696871781885,0.10371043326821074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10443833376697123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05596181098323985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197162529784906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359853134311404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084048157545666,0.059204868764438326,0.0,0.07906915959912346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394559405037456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813095618007023,0.0,0.0,0.1819035982057393,0.0,0.07734737086423374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283597091066824,0.06558355917439866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16973943644895514,0.19185158579844225,0.08806510134729585,0.05217334494372591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118044311908022,0.0,0.08223680104245851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21757226107976368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592749258781374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16319614913958622,0.10156560879061052,0.0,0.05045212609629307,0.0,0.0,0.09720534745906508,0.09974343366210532,0.0,0.12968531473955974,0.0896999028489216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770907848006351,0.0,0.10021302086048052,0.0780470060544155,0.16571026358556187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248112772849887,0.0,0.09738769980562413,0.0,0.10751770769384784,0.07327569511222977,0.09757128334764173,0.06748523047316808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763275434390144,0.17230042082700864,0.08994673195774422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776642017113372,0.0,0.0,0.09768408654547542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678281713254009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09897837268696424,0.08784237307534813,0.0,0.09228663610179268,0.0,0.0,0.0918271117987114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839863595698349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20742086653642147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186856730163112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18158958244425816,0.0,0.1299562367220716,0.1956980077226777,0.0733134104503076,0.0,0.10515918874406176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13804776241007571,0.0,0.16047845856173534,0.08451919508817132,0.0,0.10658950973721658,0.06098934820132674,0.0588231870345362,0.0,0.1457614940301298,0.10706128238431133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15857537003213762,0.0,0.0,0.2165894266144068,0.0,0.07363824260467487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283726866341971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06683314504687618,0.0,0.0,0.06521369782046693,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ashleyamichalski,2020/04/04,"How to Deal With a Toxic Mom Ever since I can remember, my mother has dealt with mental illness. Depression, anxiety, body dysmorphia, anger issues, and most likely a mood disorder. These episodes come in waves and when they do they are extremely hard for me to handle. I’m 32 and my mother is 54. Anytime I try to tell her I’m anxious, depressed, or sick she will tell me “you’re fine” and not want to talk about my feelings. I told her this is hurtful to me because she makes me feel like she cuts me and my feelings off when I’m trying to open up to her. She says that is her way of helping and that she wants me to tell her what she should do to help me. As I’m trying to tell her that all I really want is for her to listen and to ask what’s making me feel anxious, what am I doing to help my anxiety, etc, she’ll cut me off and say “can I speak now because you just keep going on and on” and it’s very hurtful. I then become quiet and say a few words which piss her off because she doesn’t understand why I would be upset that she was so rude to me. She can’t handle any type of shame or negative feelings towards herself because she can’t accept shame. She has majors issues with her childhood and how she was raised, she was also in an extremely abusive relationship with my father and she’s never worked through any of those issues. I asked her to get therapy but she says “they tell me everything I already know”. And it’s just very difficult talking to her 75% of the time. I am a calm and understanding person. I never raise my voice or talk down to her, I tell her how her behavior makes me feel and she becomes so offended and won’t talk to me, and makes me feel like I did something wrong. 
My question is how do I communicate more effectively with someone like this?",4.866687422166876,4.888160342465753,5.7840161892901625,83.14426836861769,68.86301369863014,8.828144458281445,29.193648816936488,8.575989854853784,1.968890410958904,1395,46,293,20,22,461,174,365,0.15,0.7859999999999999,0.064,-0.9691,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,3,2,14,23,6,3,6,0,29,4,2,9,4,66,58,33,0,5,7,4,8,4,0,5,2,8,0,1,14,25,0,1,14,0,0,2,8,15,0,0,5,16,73,7,42,47,6,23,0,4,0,0,66,11,1,5,13,208,87,2,0.0,0.09261579696919607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625986524113131,0.0625105832753769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063132660033944,0.0,0.11959596526469653,0.17661422552340794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461522657388832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906009182341693,0.17265989548756613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682655669158733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733444635949615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08058733980469784,0.13465123946855975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958681563506735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08717751128529343,0.0,0.07070704878925052,0.0,0.0,0.07025197814626924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27666713006802496,0.11168586559367337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040839332858634815,0.0,0.04442443551639372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07002279552759492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15718223796073996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673600162652996,0.0,0.0,0.2447599261843207,0.0,0.069478934231599,0.0,0.0,0.04295885619078491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527549193649275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20870985914791584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877453264466434,0.0,0.0,0.0915489217236818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205753088871344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682529133794676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756557599605258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05007615157332383,0.0,0.0,0.08392272455354753,0.08854862715118175,0.0,0.0,0.2486479793431857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466102765202117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623113452965693,0.0601772198794534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.251312550592067,0.40993144728417824,0.0,0.0893914369425813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0455801428939837,0.0,0.0,0.07469246984802243,0.0,0.15921196166847748,0.0,0.0,0.16275040926308112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12899287518316854,0.138315786919679,0.062045784409614335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053408026764457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569069271999931,0.0,0.0,0.0555280041319127,0.0854639747569669,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mentalcase992,2020/04/04,"What’s wrong with me? I’m 28 and have been diagnosed with ADHD since about 12 and was treated for depression in high school. At this point I’m almost positive I’ve developed borderline personality disorder due to fears of abandonment stemming from my late adoption when I was 2.

I ask have several really intense and completely baseless fears that I don’t understand. I’m a fairly picky eater and am horribly embarrassed about it to the point where I will choose not to eat anything at a company dinner to avoid people seeing what to order or watching me eat it. At lunch I’ll only eat in the break room if no one is in there and even then I’ll sit in the furthest corner and turn my back so I’m facing the wall. I’ve gotten in my head and stressed out so many times about what I’ll do if in the future I’m at some important function and have to eat food I don’t like in front of people. It’s awful. 

I also have a fear of dancing. I get so much second hand embarrassment from seeing other people dance poorly that I just can’t ever bring myself to dance in front of anyone, ever. Not even once. 

Is this just part of the over emotionality of ADHD/BPD? Is this something else? I know it seems silly but it’s actually quite crippling. What’s weird is that in general I’m extremely extroverted and carefree and quite confident in myself. But certain things trigger this neurosis and make me completely retreat inside myself.",4.7800714285714285,6.067211150000002,5.968571428571429,77.20642857142859,69.64285714285714,9.171428571428573,28.642857142857146,9.516144504307137,2.640157142857142,1142,41,210,25,20,382,156,280,0.10800000000000001,0.8059999999999999,0.086,-0.3136,0,1,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,17,15,0,7,9,1,17,11,3,2,3,37,34,22,0,2,9,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,18,14,7,2,4,3,1,6,6,11,0,2,4,4,18,4,37,29,3,41,0,2,3,0,2,23,0,6,10,138,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.10153128857900356,0.0,0.2500797450221568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418437307798988,0.0,0.0,0.08320341909004274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274952042927188,0.0,0.08561880136747409,0.0,0.09726647537155197,0.0,0.0,0.08000290401893105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103894086933748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21817491888665885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961237378910644,0.10560179706272242,0.0,0.0,0.11924267821002765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4258492332086212,0.08691485759867096,0.11703475038857634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743928579857953,0.18822631000307646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35123304002526823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12580961621128914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054358349405023335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067784803693571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10992749802305896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057179497102512085,0.0,0.11736541605898228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05083031907571461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944973542483368,0.10548361357317393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764838241492145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108027584056375,0.07050245788253137,0.07912964623782545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266879513146258,0.0,0.2163916490044237,0.0908466288182141,0.0,0.0,0.19670916667840907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22132579190936133,0.0,0.0,0.06665282592896497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529741175512676,0.16581813826685424,0.09471714650251224,0.0,0.11753935616591665,0.0,0.08606572360432868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009764399808546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11918129112373325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691217700539699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060668506558088815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316927396980395,0.0,0.1083127832077525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137550561235245,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrBaloonHands228,2020/04/04,"33 and experiencing mental decline I have found myself, lately posting and saying things that make sense to me at the time but the sentence structure is extremely poor or the thought made no sense in the first place. Sometime almost r/ihadastroke worthy. I have never been a great writer and maybe I'm over thinking it.",6.852586206896555,8.415269948275862,6.137413793103452,76.88646551724139,65.0344827586207,7.179310344827586,31.74137931034483,7.1686216300943375,2.1412965517241376,259,10,41,2,4,79,49,58,0.183,0.742,0.075,-0.838,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,0,4,0,0,2,1,12,10,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,4,2,4,1,4,6,0,9,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,2,4,28,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26012598407818205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209635020301744,0.0,0.2848286155477295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2864015840186605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930362150015932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458042956314372,0.17340106042420306,0.0,0.2609777458536712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617909388808517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20035360578905093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2714083806566107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24879153783990046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2065825901395818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25692297763828303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17258220139267014,0.16645259230909756,0.0,0.20623141794338049,0.15147621955898202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ulvie,2020/04/04,"Why do I tend to feel like everyone's against me? I often feel as though people, including friends, are silently judging me or are just keeping me around for pity/to be polite. I know it's all in my head, because it's not like they've said or done anything to make me feel this way, but I don't understand why this feeling keeps happening when it's essentially baseless.

It's worse when I interact with strangers. I don't feel welcome anywhere despite being greeted politely and interacted with normally by others. I wouldn't say I'm a shy person, but this feeling presents itself in most social situations and it makes me dull myself down in fear of saying the wrong thing or revealing how weird I am. This feeling is ruining my ability to be candid when I socialise.",7.519256756756757,7.19196308783784,7.730405405405405,72.58993243243245,63.3918918918919,10.913513513513513,39.44594594594595,10.411451182825502,4.204145945945947,619,31,110,13,8,202,98,148,0.17,0.723,0.107,-0.929,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,8,9,0,1,2,0,12,1,1,3,1,32,29,13,0,2,7,0,7,2,1,1,0,3,0,1,12,5,0,2,10,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,10,17,4,15,23,2,10,0,2,0,0,9,5,0,5,6,75,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250746550060411,0.13530314568320878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092651571344117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15553833510196047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14523276725225626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103078064725258,0.5379542675356185,0.1085815434684156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742694243074052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13440407816049993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598538382879346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701910354477265,0.0,0.0,0.08352961918750364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850907792916596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20290874340181544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489177334816593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053705899994782,0.1327116308149645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14457710508657998,0.24173677872193705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084290329060126,0.0,0.15493446054378351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097526950653504,0.0,0.14932920677732905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15822674197819633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064242867427105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27429430794579623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548905910225219,0.0,0.16617698650997148,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,staankdaddy,2020/04/04,Having issues with weight on my medication. I’m on lexapro and Buspirone and I’m having issues losing weight. I’ve changed my diet up completely and I’m exercising a lot more (going on 6 months now) I am just curious if anyone else has had issues with losing weight while on these medicines? I’m currently deployed so I am not allowed to stop taking my medicine until I get back home. I feel at a complete loss. I’m at the heaviest I’ve ever been in my life and I am worried it may impact my military career. I’ve been on these medicines for a little over a year now and I have gained 20 lbs.,1.0722248243559704,3.455819360655738,3.1872599531615933,87.73262295081969,84.90163934426229,5.7807962529273995,22.648711943793913,7.1686216300943375,0.9800613583138168,470,17,94,7,14,159,74,122,0.086,0.853,0.06,-0.4427,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,4,6,3,0,0,5,0,11,7,0,1,1,16,20,9,0,1,3,0,4,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,3,7,4,1,1,1,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,4,11,0,15,16,2,22,0,3,0,0,0,11,0,3,10,61,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335874166314564,0.15145841479023892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11366397249083407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563732951077452,0.0,0.309971597689192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348411728657264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371108451999636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474191580590349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07722952069286987,0.0,0.08400915543499113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14827488226842386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4628550581242081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104409193768796,0.0,0.14815384398417367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3307441323992916,0.0,0.1256707437472735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891246559956325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798801221064127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358361365322547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114177116945044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.540012515874387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501177472828381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519082892533376
mentalhealth,Low-Hovercraft,2020/04/04,"I need support and feel ashamed to ask I live alone and haven’t seen another person in weeks. I know there are so many of us in this boat and everyone I know is struggling so I feel bad asking for help right now. The world is falling apart and I feel like I’m crumbling along with it. 

I’m doing my best to take care of myself personally. When I can I reach out and ask for support. I try to schedule calls/FaceTime sessions with my friends and family but I just keep thinking if I didn’t reach out first no one would talk to me. I have a few good friends, who also struggle with mental health, but this whole situation has made me realize how little support I have in my life. 

I don’t really know if there’s a question here I just needed a space to be honest. Thanks for reading",2.2823602484472048,4.050168633540377,3.4800931677018667,90.594798136646,76.9503105590062,6.339130434782609,24.54347826086957,7.1686216300943375,0.8998496894409933,614,21,132,7,14,199,102,161,0.09,0.693,0.217,0.9648,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,2,11,15,0,3,4,0,13,2,0,2,0,33,36,15,0,5,6,0,3,1,2,1,2,0,0,2,4,12,0,1,9,1,0,1,4,4,0,2,3,4,22,11,19,31,3,16,0,0,1,0,12,10,0,3,6,89,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788228478840472,0.0,0.09874246729026992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12947371920187473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3462958085564312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030960021999762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12957880994192295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589042356616162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798512146827125,0.0,0.0,0.11640071571982498,0.0,0.18729716480182304,0.08821016660160325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502729796149612,0.0,0.0,0.19079209641821904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356450440824556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124755876210792,0.0,0.0,0.08276231627358897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974975806102996,0.0,0.0,0.20357497386767487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721365051672503,0.060323375812910425,0.1237538295770917,0.10903019514154724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683450325643922,0.0,0.12518370491045225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443319683494306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831094695818176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366947797921212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21562624162850835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13831963438021105,0.0,0.1235078567292875,0.0,0.07910088979603612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544649949104208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879044707399227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25816459356284416,0.0,0.0,0.42035200332432,0.0,0.0,0.09283741439519834,0.09924407998703746,0.0,0.11367867760783752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911743726130707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838310415801324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14852455167101364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09904375014376013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13785480585013954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771270150424469,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ozzietheostrich,2020/04/04,"Friend blacks out occasionally A friend of mine (F14) has a lot of issues in her life that I don't know all of them and I won't go into too much detail but she has severe depression, lots of deficiencies and lots of painkillers and supplements needed to be taken everyday. She also has anxiety and panic attacks daily and she is emotionally and verbally abused at home from what I've been told. However, she told me that every now and then she has these black outs where she describes it as losing consciousness but continuing to do things and then waking up about 10 minutes later not remembering any of it. What I'm concerned about is the last time this happened was probably halfway through February, she blacked out and woke up on the floor of the school bathroom with cuts in her wrists surrounded by blood. She has been doing somewhat better with managing the cutting but when she does it with no control, there's not much that can be done and I'm really worried for her. Now with this COVID-19 lockdown stuff, there's no escape for her from home and no chance for her to catch up with the needed physical friendship so I'm just really scared she's going to blackout again and do something bad. I'm wondering if there's a name for this and if there's known causes and treatments.",6.643902439024387,7.205196560975613,6.49136585365854,77.73290243902444,65.09756097560975,9.812032520325204,31.84715447154471,9.725611199111238,2.9048442276422763,1038,38,191,20,15,327,144,246,0.188,0.754,0.057999999999999996,-0.9899,1,1,1,0,1,0,15.0,0,0,1,3,15,11,3,2,8,0,19,4,3,2,1,46,34,25,0,4,8,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,2,0,14,23,0,1,5,0,0,3,7,8,0,0,8,3,20,3,38,23,7,28,0,2,3,0,21,14,0,7,11,145,34,2,0.0,0.1624782815648325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966392864466387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932540524027539,0.0,0.10490514336748767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560067610300879,0.0,0.0,0.11449898852104524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128157679054373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408717193110491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15380452226604666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811107130408274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000460963560172,0.14033303014531104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542543642547838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553911640955546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21189475432152946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586986623010038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212648414925231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751079444233619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431295506229552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536382950082479,0.11178039124687293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685996116535404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534149564012744,0.0,0.34975262961813897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20161471068619208,0.20336238659454106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608941477811334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14785083961005835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17569976874938215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15534314064407673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729245117260966,0.13878429486996802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15491944572096789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557044905217032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15698264117712846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110400680515504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07996242037799599,0.0,0.0,0.262069852959882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14871315042355648,0.0,0.13926359018004136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MeltedButterOnYaToes,2020/04/04,"I smoked CBD and completely lost touch with reality Little back story. I used to smoke a lot of weed, like A LOT. My parents got divorced and then my dad found a girlfriend, they fought a lot. I was around 14 at the time. Were talking violent, fights, 2-3 times a week it seemed. I started having panic attacks alot. I then developed Depersonalization, a disassociation disorder where I feel like I'm in a dream and its very panic inducing. Well years go by and I havent had DP for a long time now. I'm 22 now. I started to smoke CBD becuase of its calming effects, I smoked too much or something one day of a particular strain and I had the worst most distressing panic attack of my life. I could hardly tell where I was, i slept for 14 hours and now today its still lingering. If yesterday was a 10 I'm at about a 4 now. I've been having suicidal thoughts because this is so terrifying. Constant fight or flight. It feels like it will never end. I really dont know what to do. Today my grandma hit her head on a sink and I had to take her to the hospital. She isnt doing so hot but i was starting to recover and this made it worse. I want this to end so badly. Its sheer terror. I feel like I'm going to die.  Usually panic attacks last an hour or so for me. But over 22 hours???? Is this normal. Someone please shed some light",0.740611162361624,3.0966619483394884,2.996207333948341,88.66504900830259,86.34317343173433,6.044326568265682,21.38387915129152,7.413659706084162,0.8708273985239852,1032,35,218,18,32,351,158,271,0.222,0.7140000000000001,0.064,-0.9924,1,0,5,0,3,0,35.0,0,0,1,2,16,23,7,7,17,0,20,3,2,4,1,37,45,20,2,4,6,2,6,4,1,1,1,0,0,0,13,10,0,0,9,1,0,2,4,17,1,1,16,7,27,6,24,26,8,41,0,1,0,0,13,9,0,11,34,140,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424417182574549,0.0,0.3229789286478884,0.0,0.07276757351699903,0.07901529480648993,0.05768790412688653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922176978659113,0.10226555044666524,0.0,0.07555741246126184,0.0,0.0,0.06103099119059434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098214974305554,0.0,0.10845856734099064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109101434224948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16763496832376862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354912292844652,0.20281928019193984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037611095355028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10756517232775202,0.0,0.07568731844635196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477332328755413,0.0,0.09712161096642212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27958577868472523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05200827782560881,0.07713920168240647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684267245748549,0.18493323589150396,0.09484795839608484,0.0,0.08374796118814108,0.0,0.0,0.10330400389287744,0.2413628932061945,0.0,0.08954481765908362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956675341837865,0.0,0.07298744333020506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272106028268327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412633203767516,0.0,0.0,0.4441296358606177,0.10507966854322524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038795268270154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060624854439708914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615108421328051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018293666912303,0.07285374536891688,0.0,0.0,0.20094693487383133,0.0,0.07557469851251006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351404982245667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115286248714077,0.07606308751685469,0.08271413817105137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07512868995179774,0.1655452410860342,0.0,0.1794036103174595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173324435514813,0.10422579346932223,0.07808282022519712,0.05581748453946238,0.0,0.07590954983074351,0.0,0.08508717782065875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09643995709341407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060941083530464187
mentalhealth,Yesmaamcc,2020/04/04,"Trouble making decisions Hey! 
I don’t know why I’m making this post it’s just something that been on my mind. I tried to turn to google for answers but came up with nothing. So I’m here to see if anyone feels the same, and also to feel less alone.. i guess. 

I’m a 25 year old female who struggles with making decisions. Yes I’m an adult who still struggles with that. I over think every single possible outcome, and when I finally make a decision I’m left with regret. I’m always left feeling like I made the wrong choice big or small. 

This has been an issue I’ve struggled with since I was a child. 

I got diagnosed with anxiety and bipolar depression last year but my medications don’t seem to be working, as I am still anxious. 


I just started seeing a therapist and I’m getting re-evaluated but I have to wait for my insurance to approve it.

My question here is does anyone else struggle with this? How to you cope? If you were able to overcome this, how? Also what could be wrong with me? Is this just anxiety?

I feel like I live every single day with regret and it’s becoming unbearable",1.3204425711275007,3.8300740000000033,3.1050456621004585,87.80338514225504,85.25570776255708,6.10895679662803,23.49157007376185,7.468242284971852,1.2896398314014754,862,33,169,15,26,286,126,219,0.19,0.758,0.052000000000000005,-0.9851,0,1,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,2,13,12,0,4,8,1,14,3,0,7,0,50,42,18,0,5,9,0,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,2,13,15,0,1,12,0,0,1,2,10,0,0,7,6,20,2,24,32,4,19,0,3,2,0,8,7,0,6,12,107,33,1,0.10456007781967112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829270695161317,0.0,0.1672333129117507,0.08700236087916087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15997634667706012,0.11812312609334115,0.0,0.14622167510883208,0.10713415606458454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11547839108372256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195888739031418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08348271400804015,0.0,0.0,0.06743260015427104,0.0,0.09005744181269983,0.10612627801461892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150122871792443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734652816219579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17619275040450194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21147486809776805,0.1493954809729289,0.0,0.11454045439522295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054628325102714696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362624597727973,0.0,0.11518471392577415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091335556826763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746348428742217,0.08523041887071688,0.0,0.0,0.2272096609794627,0.0,0.0,0.1021655449783121,0.0,0.0923284643441978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893727378988833,0.27917865546776394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053332781252234,0.0,0.0,0.10557587187023283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10032821466886767,0.0,0.10971821277346744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787577730129785,0.1001396514761538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171312168559929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664168916673386,0.09518756784514386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649317686646255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049545624879774,0.0,0.0,0.07400816124853027,0.0,0.16700362642509606,0.0,0.0,0.4372355830558064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140230931593204,0.0,0.06699787591594725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098942933578957,0.11373133948561966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434920695251203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761209819572371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286400619596144,0.0,0.1346665239581145
mentalhealth,xjfjxjdvsn,2020/04/04,"My experience on Zoloft. Hello everyone!

I am now a couple of years on Zoloft, and it worked for me tremendously!

Most of my life I experienced from anxiety but it became worse when I went to college. I developped social anxiety, general anxiety, and panic attacks. My body was always on alert and I had problems sleeping. I also did not have control over my body anymore, I even got muscle spasms in my neck which made me even more self-consious and even more anxious. I also had problems with reading because my eyes couldn't focus anymore. This resulted that I had no motivation to even study, to go to classes or to do anything at all! My school results would also get also influenced by it. Ultimately, I just would avoid to go to school and sit at home playing videogames.

I could not live with it. Then i decided that enough was enough! I went to a psychiatrist which presribed me Zoloft. I started from 25mg to now 100mg which is my current dose.

It worked! It worked so good! I was confident again i could finally see the world and kick it in the balls.

However there was some side effects: 

1) Hair loss and weight gain but i could live with it!

2) There was also a period however when i relapsed which was thanks to co sumption of protein (chicken and whey protein) when i wanted to build some muscle. This was because protein rich foods contain already a dosage of serotonin which Zoloft already provides. This phenomenon is called Seroronin Syndrome. I saw that a lot of people on the interner experienced this same problem. I decided to just eat normally and not eat a lot of protein anymore which was annoying but it made me better.

3) There also a relapse when I got Zoloft from a different manufacturer which would have the same effects but not for me, so I kept to the same manufact. and I am fine again.

Now I want to stop with it, it dont want ro be dependent anymore on it, I want to live my own life but i have a feeling I'm going to be dependent for it for the resr of my life.

How can i get rid of it? What are you experiences with it? Just lower tje dosage to 50 mg? Talk maybe with a psychologist and talk about underlying problems? Yes I am going to contact a doctor about it but I am stuck here in another country thanks to Covid19. Thank you all!",2.6414343434343444,5.12025370909091,3.9924242424242418,83.85419191919195,78.95454545454545,7.092929292929293,27.959595959595962,8.167268648758528,2.137844444444444,1792,80,339,35,45,588,202,440,0.122,0.763,0.115,-0.5123,5,1,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,2,0,10,31,17,2,2,17,1,34,20,6,12,2,77,60,32,0,16,14,0,3,0,0,3,10,0,1,0,31,17,4,5,6,3,1,6,7,9,0,0,21,8,47,8,55,30,15,37,0,1,3,0,8,14,0,8,16,252,78,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203690960787906,0.35227350645911576,0.06108955646752975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698504724663989,0.16849342877093493,0.08294130537012499,0.29124323081775705,0.0,0.0,0.060416658566851564,0.0,0.0,0.08352343597785884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950971483886061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493214747535896,0.0,0.16310142473407835,0.0,0.0,0.07496786277037533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234439381839187,0.17585460624017468,0.0812354863584824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670605704946486,0.0,0.07514630983809842,0.0,0.0,0.08604520705630668,0.0,0.0,0.15024963742072908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15172058907994618,0.0,0.19396726586081808,0.0,0.0,0.07015392935822833,0.0,0.14363354632291134,0.0,0.0,0.03712228543448752,0.0,0.0,0.08042569748552061,0.0,0.0,0.08877719035613188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671562282600551,0.0,0.1669002895385588,0.06157943337143424,0.11743796890505333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364411847065212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15557165686528293,0.0,0.0,0.1944879959274587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248345100563276,0.0,0.1389395440044552,0.0,0.0,0.07375812719438532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07193393304084067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614006189653461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05089871292212395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810039784844723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734377466272534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486056256891128,0.0585045438843608,0.0,0.07659085933536844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347090022056688,0.0748402816098992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0519655524282796,0.0,0.0,0.06138063403370918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180210197690955,0.0,0.20277995612985056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17321506821119584,0.0,0.0,0.08940319737295854,0.0,0.13611821820654035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16034727030336074,0.0,0.0748190906668786,0.15646186371396656,0.0,0.0,0.04727870678734464
mentalhealth,fireopal1807,2020/04/04,"Relationship advice I don't know what to do? I'm a female (25),and I have never been in a real relationship. I can be with someone for two-three months, after that I feel like im suffocating. I'm literally escaping, its not like :"" I dont like him"" , it's like panic attacks, ""I have to get out of this"" . I feel so trapped.
I've had relationships with with really nice guys, but as soon as I start developing feelings, I tell myself it's not "" it"". Then I convince myself that we shouldn't be together because of some stupid reason like : we dont like the same music. Then i develop some kind of hatred towards him and we break up.
It's been like this since I started dating (16yo),  at first I was like ""we're not for eachother"",  but after awhile I noticed that I'm the problem.
I dont have really deep connection with anyone, I have friends, but I can't say I love them. Am I just passing through something, is this normal?",1.3256451612903248,3.620421080645162,3.453129032258065,86.86969354838709,82.81720430107526,6.300645161290323,23.27849462365592,7.554174236665415,1.1570030107526883,715,26,147,12,20,243,107,186,0.15,0.7040000000000001,0.146,-0.7094,0,1,1,0,0,0,38.0,3,0,1,1,3,17,2,1,4,0,20,1,0,1,1,29,31,9,0,3,7,0,3,8,1,1,0,1,0,1,12,9,0,0,5,0,0,1,10,4,0,1,4,4,27,13,21,24,3,19,0,0,0,1,14,6,0,2,19,101,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12028516009126973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606956287021962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003618015880573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07503641586572657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4327926159670759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867187211642692,0.08793774064314172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047029344168606,0.0,0.0,0.09510142956289172,0.0,0.0643110682246438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188152916505922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329616790588619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12818252945637326,0.06764875275757831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4810965974852219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109633545766924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825174408559036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493699300732424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206051102771798,0.0,0.1401423188240175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14442323984170738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778347985715105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010690492540895,0.15771319337694426,0.12656021571002946,0.0,0.39646779366181856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978885797352003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182389059094243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042963905917907,0.09476308799247826,0.0,0.0,0.1742518701895237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075888015644772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024407996776752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tjallo,2020/04/04,"Do you ever feel too smart? It sounds cocky, and it probably is. But I feel like if I would be (over)thinking less I would have lot more peace in my mind. Sometimes I wish I would be that guy that did not give a fuck because he just doesn't know any better.",1.3272222222222254,3.1279728333333345,2.170148148148151,98.7396666666667,79.92592592592592,5.801481481481483,18.20740740740741,6.742157984588678,-0.29849925925925946,199,4,48,2,5,62,44,54,0.067,0.684,0.249,0.8919,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,3,4,1,0,1,0,10,1,0,0,1,15,16,3,0,5,4,0,2,1,0,3,0,1,0,1,4,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,7,3,1,10,3,2,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,2,2,33,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16292724249229149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14604989194575405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118950583108048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21671998080903065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422845737469609,0.17116086063954528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22149413963504172,0.0,0.2298334937698224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23722860373013635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131670641734664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170500104308024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20368813304399386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419143735057669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583150970619428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23695747536120104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535175499033058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755130006149608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5105867744120051,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KazimirMata,2020/04/04,"Helping my grieving grandpa.  My grandmother passed away two days ago from cancer. My grandpa hasn't done anything but cry since then, how do I take his mind off this. Also, what are some fun activities you suggest I do with him when he recovers from our loss a bit. I am 19 and male, he is 84. He has trouble walking so I can't go on walks with him.",0.7979166666666693,3.0428262916666715,2.5061111111111143,93.12500000000004,84.69444444444446,5.266666666666668,24.277777777777786,6.6274283507984215,0.7379944444444444,271,11,59,3,8,89,58,72,0.195,0.7290000000000001,0.076,-0.8573,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,0,9,1,0,1,0,7,11,7,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,3,0,1,1,0,12,1,7,10,2,11,0,2,0,0,13,3,0,1,4,40,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692059695889179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428635873312629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499138793876327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28533004622364433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315546530392558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335930564108341,0.19585718767866625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107838971608362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17259601829579466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035593557426636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.306643868157549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512184067602777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22833972167514044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2966644273416226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alskdjfhg0,2020/04/04,"Frustrated I've always been one to just kinda keep my problems to myself but ever since I've gone into university things have been piling up and I thought that it was maybe time I actually share my problems and talk to someone because I really feel myself getting worse day by day.

Now comes the frustrating part: everytime, every single time I sit in front of someone and I think I'm ready to share my problems I go absolutely mute and I have no idea why. My throat closes up and I can't speak and I just end up saying nothing. This probably sounds dumb because all I have to do is open my mouth and literally say something, anything. But I can't. And I don't know why. It's like my mouth is glued shut.

If someone can tell me why this happens or just give me some advice please do so. This has been frustrating me for such a long time now.",2.049823529411768,4.3102363352941175,3.5111764705882362,87.70029411764708,79.76470588235293,6.352941176470589,23.52941176470589,7.510576382923642,1.0932352941176475,667,23,135,10,17,219,104,170,0.163,0.754,0.083,-0.9358,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,8,10,4,0,2,0,16,3,3,0,2,32,28,13,0,4,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,7,12,0,1,5,0,0,4,4,7,0,1,6,5,23,3,13,22,4,23,0,0,0,0,8,8,1,4,11,87,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.13207738140510614,0.0,0.0,0.13225775298476813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261804013838858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113775589961185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165010342870249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658789667642833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17457290110453946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987566552645924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12242747277558523,0.11403415974370427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684345945990281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071227547095271,0.1298354387831787,0.0769197903587355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11968530430019553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15278824494010998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030102337419203,0.0,0.0,0.07438217669703066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612282315596206,0.0,0.0,0.1197762338526243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597243472089565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986735983273445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171340332692464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656565119286105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14856837493369832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14592500606088948,0.3885212034339087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670559425726196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21526385447422386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11195893956915767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3440326201575996,0.10419533942735046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087853367260419,0.11829766141097428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08991733006235256,0.08672373258432083,0.0,0.10744896244688593,0.2367626056587232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.366383946420522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792831120518667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tulikammm,2020/04/04,"I was bullied in college! I've given up on life .. I was bullied in college. Everyone i knew treated me like shit . A guy even said ''THE WORLD IS BETTER OFF WITHOUT ME '' (I accidently read it on a whatsapp group .) ..Ever since then, I've stopped hanging out with people .. I don't trust any human being on this planet .. The only reason I'm alive is because I know my sister would be devastated .(she lives in a different country ) ..",1.3897590361445749,3.941342734939763,3.712060240963858,83.23218674698798,85.50602409638554,5.247710843373494,26.37228915662651,6.742157984588678,1.4648081927710854,329,15,59,4,10,113,62,83,0.212,0.698,0.09,-0.9179,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,1,0,5,0,8,2,1,1,1,9,13,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,2,2,2,0,1,3,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,5,1,10,4,11,5,0,14,0,0,0,0,6,10,1,0,4,39,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723543280527697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15450044205885965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241554563509484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648007480320844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16740098197382558,0.2292595522797047,0.0,0.2421818261297068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509548186377666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392891982538077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790188532480221,0.1238226068751217,0.0,0.2238005219137661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927597397859924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17570994748116536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25351805305475617,0.0,0.0,0.2605882630275713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410884815380429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26016223471287464,0.20965601737434794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118951023167368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24431624088741996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18004322884712548,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ithraen,2020/04/04,"What am I supposed to say to my girlfriend after her attempt? Hope this is the right place to seek advice on that...

Wednesday, my girlfriend attempted suicide (pills and alcool, I found her unconscious) for the second time in 3 months (she spent 2 months in the hospital's psychology area whatever you call it in english and it really didn't help her). She's in the hospital, she seems to have recovered without any problem, so that's a huge relief (for me more then her). Yesterday she started waking up, but she was still too out of it, so I couldn't talk to her (because of the pandemic, I can't visit her in the hospital, it's definitely the hardest part for me). Tonight, I should be able to talk to her, the problem is... I have no idea what to say.

She really didn't want to be reanimated (she left a note), so I imagine she's devastated it didn't work and could be angry at me that I didn't let her succeed? So I really have no idea what to say. I can't just ask her how she feels because obviously, she is the far opposite from well. I'm not someone who has personally dealt with depression, I have no intention to die anytime in the next 60 years, so I can't relate to how she feels and I'm really shitty at comforting someone, never knowing what to say or what to do. Normally, I just hug her and try to calm her down and it generally works well enough, but right now, even though that's all I want to do, I can't. I fucking can't. All I can do is try to talk to her (if she even wants to) on the phone. And I don't want to say something that will just make it worse...

I'm lost, I don't know what to do, any kind of advice would be welcome, here...",3.927455073995773,4.202594171511628,5.498298097251588,83.49257928118395,70.94767441860466,9.161522198731502,28.717758985200845,9.218907990703514,2.142655813953488,1281,45,284,25,22,437,158,344,0.142,0.762,0.096,-0.9622,0,0,1,0,0,1,58.0,0,1,0,6,19,15,1,0,13,0,37,4,1,4,4,48,57,20,2,13,9,0,2,0,2,3,1,5,0,1,20,9,0,0,9,0,1,1,18,5,2,1,8,7,49,10,44,39,5,35,0,2,0,2,43,20,1,4,14,205,69,3,0.1011567405460608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19769839223498292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13758010476752155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456789725434732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332842026791635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103292342099143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08076542612713672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08712615240589823,0.0,0.10498472609713533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452195388529976,0.0,0.13362614619746305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022957748801226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109131447739289,0.0,0.09351777661683207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780323089544832,0.0,0.0,0.10047146800410107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22838729447144984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533917886009288,0.11118619825360973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990709458392328,0.10343962078720373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1104245317999115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752290980945906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614846904245341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801831442436624,0.0,0.10758134116893636,0.0,0.09911212812548696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095428923589796,0.0,0.0,0.08832616404744736,0.10568726375591243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19358667837272409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592143930407409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277460743059164,0.0,0.40221950108248705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920892974116578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714195559972935,0.07787540094355712,0.0,0.0,0.07159926160938808,0.0,0.08078390366957286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106490557540296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2439178689050835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938598398568008,0.0,0.0589853088933667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373575734558682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386594658193649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819041163741354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975114880996982,0.0,0.147286623776995,0.0,0.10308736067855401,0.0718588461552484,0.0,0.0,0.06514162435764778
mentalhealth,s0cia11yinept,2020/04/04,"Is it normal think about hurting or killing people? Now I know what it sounds like but let me explain. I’m not ACTUALLY going to kill anyone or hurt anyone as far as I know of, but I can’t help but to just randomly think about it. 
I could be at the train station and think, I could just push this person in front of the train and they would die. At a street crossing same thing, I could push this person in front of a car and they would die or be severely injured. In the kitchen, I could use this knife and just stab the person in front of me and they would bleed out. Etc etc etc. 

Now I’m not ACTUALLY going to do any of these but I just wanted to ask if this is normal? I feel like most people think these kind of things but recently someone told me that it’s weird to think these things so now I’m questioning whether it’s okay or not. 

Thanks guys",2.0610242085661103,3.5968025139664803,2.973497206703912,94.99864432029794,76.93296089385476,6.114115456238363,20.31322160148976,6.742157984588678,0.0241639478584732,666,15,155,6,15,211,87,179,0.22899999999999998,0.7170000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.9904,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,0,12,10,2,0,6,1,14,3,0,1,0,48,33,19,4,11,18,0,1,2,0,3,2,1,1,4,17,6,1,0,10,0,0,9,4,5,0,0,1,2,15,5,22,22,5,22,0,2,0,0,12,9,0,8,6,106,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.2074115765935272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226835768518029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861519970680928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993496354121968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3393970204523239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220586363119547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35556290223281856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05373413300717722,0.07592047903828722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079324120316133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522562909230188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123163848207613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22753197173478035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23514764280156575,0.1106655568984782,0.11680822541347725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866994943056278,0.0,0.10383790815421834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082472822190493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735074514085048,0.27837688423599943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904855536635504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10493042128972972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12005670131523588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004361355866386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784064573197593,0.0,0.0,0.21180646140436074,0.3404728711310979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015471037677289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178457381749693,0.0,0.0,0.0626817651793922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.226476966516358,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kaithala,2020/04/04,"I have depression but so does my girlfriend I have depression but so does my girlfriend

So, she’s been feeling pretty low these past few days like really low. And I don’t know What to do anymore because she won’t text her therapist. And tbh I’m
not the best at giving advice about depression. I’m starting meds soon and it’s just really frustrating to see her like this and literally have no idea what to do. Because I can’t think of anything. Any advice or solution or something. And it’s always the same like in here for you and stuff which obviously I am and I will for a long time but it’s really hard when I can’t think properly and I feel even worse because I can’t help her. ( We’re also in LDR because of the Coronavirus and our country is on a lockdown so I can’t just go and be with her physically) 
And it’s really hard for me to be there for somebody only verbally you know. Like I’m much better at physical support and idk. Idk what to do and I can’t make her text her therapist because she just won’t listen.",1.3664020486555692,3.5584394366197216,3.5314489970123795,86.98823623559542,81.86384976525822,7.253008962868117,23.766325224071704,8.296473431620573,1.5959126760563378,812,30,170,18,22,277,107,213,0.17300000000000001,0.6729999999999999,0.154,-0.5228,0,1,1,0,0,0,13.0,1,2,0,2,14,13,1,0,5,0,20,0,0,1,1,33,36,24,0,0,9,0,4,4,2,3,0,1,0,0,11,14,0,0,7,0,0,1,10,6,0,0,1,6,26,7,18,30,4,15,0,5,1,0,17,7,0,2,11,117,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24038382060967695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836120101964664,0.1023439236910277,0.0,0.0,0.08364264081770396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198064904180415,0.0,0.0,0.10121661134205907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3748912234263448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290784778054661,0.10878145350171033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793233288699103,0.0,0.3178131671216212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2152721989360538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812388082501803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243826463124874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179905832394898,0.06990241656781257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203635258530821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08244275286242753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388494104658676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519261756817802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403618162416348,0.0,0.0,0.10884907713140987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08210190712824744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662269569557903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041744779443206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354527885193276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741520394658335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12513285999289134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31518185581443386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09801322715547817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946896239200178,0.0,0.0,0.08705839164356602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080291775293724,0.0,0.13957631075610796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856195752619012,0.0,0.15762389505099095,0.0,0.0,0.07172093688438423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253451448761638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,schnitzelbreath,2020/04/04,"Intense primal anger flashes - anyone know what this might be? I wonder if I'm reading into it too much, but I'm generally not an emotive guy. Very stoic, calm when shit hits the fan. Some things get me quite angry inside, but I've never ever lashed out at anything or anyone. 

Today, after a particular person had angered me, I went off to do some chores and one of those chores was carrying a box. I carried it into a small closet, then stood up and smacked my head on the inside of the closet by accident - in the next 5 seconds I had absolutely no control over what I did. I did a low growl, and quickly turned and got ready to punch whatever did it to me, and in the process saw myself in a mirror down the hallway. I looked like a feral madman. 

It's the first time anything has ever happened like that, and I'm kind of worried that I could now just lose it in an instant and punch someone without any control.",6.122459016393442,5.555593076502732,6.893448087431698,78.23427049180329,66.3224043715847,8.631475409836067,32.50765027322405,7.554174236665415,2.2138856830601097,715,26,137,6,10,238,122,183,0.168,0.745,0.087,-0.9596,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,5,7,9,3,0,15,0,11,2,2,2,3,29,25,13,0,2,7,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,2,12,10,0,2,2,1,0,1,4,5,0,3,10,2,13,4,22,11,3,28,0,2,2,0,2,15,1,6,14,101,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10733449682826167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207264450515263,0.0,0.2597726217836521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35405498382073025,0.1260199123866756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754525561359594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855450044687081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13425597696565694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246325991045188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623657863193585,0.0,0.0,0.156283334972971,0.1395746394842408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16198618383227925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436283107002622,0.08674302628250233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422226241786874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254323433936613,0.17657910543278665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16743999623937336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160282741988321,0.0,0.12173353896304515,0.0,0.1678613218384941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695436068843553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13781708323050065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678789597446977,0.15787960168416276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16201729815611535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373468366362964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048598154988176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203595913852937,0.0,0.1496109151808953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168121098957922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13023196326010805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14631637719961918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521491283618635,0.17116737301152013,0.0,0.16029102214147373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helpmeout404,2020/04/04,"I can’t stop dreaming about my Ex I got dumped by my ex about a month ago to be with someone else and I haven’t really been able to recover. My thoughts keep getting darker and darker. I can go 2-3 hours without thinking about her. Most days I just have complete mental breakdowns. But the absolute worst is my dreams. I keep essential reliving the break up in these dreams. Last night was the worst where I had this happen 3 times, and ended throwing up because this gave me such bad anxiety. I don’t know what to do.

I’m 19 and live in the USA.",2.2109821428571412,4.079403848214287,3.3172857142857133,91.2277142857143,77.48214285714286,6.622857142857143,24.59285714285714,7.554174236665415,1.0852292857142858,429,15,92,6,10,138,78,112,0.162,0.79,0.048,-0.9169,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,1,0,5,0,11,0,0,0,0,15,22,5,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,3,3,3,0,2,4,4,0,0,6,0,14,0,13,15,3,17,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,9,58,18,0,0.21820842214372085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934286002876063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16692884567723046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821949179181249,0.1330178288014623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287873790287275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072638035033735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18228513680791344,0.0,0.19326789432827568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140048943496003,0.0,0.1240128749193382,0.0,0.17452120890705636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19296098705731154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21489134107217028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3879073433454248,0.0,0.0,0.11992164216694852,0.17786898793727424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19268203451652294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21990276635224906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17417188072533746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047738223379781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13978990277125192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18488728796928025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824320116385049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981914603978274,0.0,0.1732331130648363,0.12723908573765086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21034513216084394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,selfcare4832,2020/04/04,"Dating in time of corona. Shoot me. Should two sensitive, emotional, individuals be in a relationship? I'm kind of...unstable...he likes me...but he doesn't know how fucked up my brain is. I want him...but I'm worried I'll hurt him... I'm worried he doesn't want me...I don't want to make him cry any more than I already have. I'm so fucking sensitive, easily triggered, afraid, emotional... it's so fucking easy being with someone who you just like and you're not attached to them. But when I really like someone, when I really care, when I really want someone, I'm afraid to show them. I'm afraid to try anything. Because I want so much and it's too much. And I run. But at the same time hope he won't let me go. I don't want a relationship. But I want him. And I'll never have him because I'm afraid. And he doesn't and shouldn't know that because it's way too early. I just...think he should be with someone more rational, normal, stable, less damaged.",0.2470093062605763,2.5321694263959387,2.585869289340099,91.14313557529611,88.23857868020306,5.922927241962775,20.89868866328257,7.333567415737692,0.747839424703892,735,25,161,13,24,250,92,197,0.083,0.705,0.212,0.9570000000000001,0,0,0,1,0,1,51.0,0,1,2,0,10,15,3,4,3,0,16,4,1,3,1,32,39,16,0,12,5,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,2,1,0,2,9,9,0,1,0,0,20,6,12,31,6,15,0,2,0,3,15,4,3,1,11,84,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428991694648373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07659220754016811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268482710056464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20597446069814088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573223917131848,0.0,0.0,0.11483370937435552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12371867793476833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533869998475303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3123736371956471,0.0,0.0,0.06401017883916395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118669235241359,0.0,0.0,0.12057265834828612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728672925487943,0.12379691651831215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517172365288232,0.0,0.1650758686090024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518134588690949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559190047135955,0.0,0.08686713737313281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11035340756517699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21646083155762372,0.0,0.0,0.2418447660571897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3817238613555009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216870465237529,0.0,0.0,0.13135082367369105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646832215401332,0.0,0.11002306563533346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4650243128483347,0.08940038764949572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22876230098379396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gabe-KC,2020/04/04,"I have some kind of weird obssession problem and it's starting to damage my productivity First of all, I would like to ask you not to reply if you can't take what I'm about to say seriously. I have been told multiple times that I ''just don't know what real problems look like'', and surprise surprise, it didn't help. This thing is starting to really get to me and I would appreciate some advice.

First of all, it's important to note that I'm a journalist dealing with pop culture. Watching movies, TV shows, playing video games, reading books is an essential part of my life. It's basically my passion and my job at the same time. So read the following in light of that.

Ever since I was a child I had a weird obsession. At least that's the closest I can describe it. I always had to keep my mind focused on one thing and one thing only. In my early years this often meant only watching one specific movie again and again, because I was almost ''obsessed'' with the idea of liking that movie. Same with video games, I always had to have a favorite that took up most of my free time. This might sounds silly, but it has never gone away and it even got worse.

Nowadays the obsession doesn't apply to specific films/games, but the mediums. For example, if I don't play anything for maybe a month, which often happens because video games don't come out that often, then I'm immediately getting anxious that video games don't drink up enough of my time. To the point where I frantically try and buy some shitty game I don't even care about just to cater to the idea that I still like games, no worries.

The exact opposite can happen too. If there are no major movie releases but there are tons of games, I might do nothing but play games for weeks on end, and therefore get completely anxious if I even encounter a video or post about movies, because it just feels alien. It's a sort of vice versa thing where I'm constantly jumping between focusing on video games and focusing on movies.

This is seriously interfering with my work, because I refuse to write articles about games when I'm in a ''movie obsession phase'' and vice versa. In the past I have rewritten actual articles so they don't mention video games, only movies, therefore eliminating interesting correlations and making it an overall inferior article.

I have no idea what this is. I don't even dare acknowledge it most of the time, because people just laugh at me. Sometimes even I feel like laughing at myself, because it's just such a bizarre thing. And yet I can't escape it. It often leads to procrastination, because instead of getting some work done I'm obsessing over whether I'm a ''good little gamer'' or a ''good little cinephile'', and the quarantine has really drawn this out and showed how much of a nuisance it is.

It may be unrelated, but I used to have an obsession with making lists. I had to concentrate my ideas and thoughts on a single paper because otherwise it felt like I'm falling apart and missing out on stuff.

Is there anything I could do to deal with this? Could someone at least give me a reasonable explanation as to why this might be? I feel that if I at least understood that this is something other people struggle with, then I could ignore it more easily. But it just feels doubly embarassing to struggle with something so absurd.",7.295612567811936,7.149973520569624,7.210513562386982,75.52851898734178,63.794303797468345,10.324122965641957,34.67106690777577,9.888512548439397,3.2794549186256785,2643,105,487,49,35,844,274,632,0.141,0.7879999999999999,0.07200000000000001,-0.9915,2,1,3,0,0,0,60.0,0,2,1,5,37,40,0,9,29,0,51,3,0,8,5,108,92,39,0,12,21,0,5,6,0,6,1,2,0,1,50,29,1,3,15,28,2,7,16,19,0,5,17,11,46,22,73,64,20,63,0,3,3,1,26,30,0,23,31,344,96,9,0.0,0.0,0.06638720313648551,0.0,0.0,0.06647786487259566,0.0,0.0,0.06812194778552458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113212370323554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15370846216034525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196534266896603,0.0,0.06359861427186234,0.0,0.06391617079744152,0.0,0.0,0.33176233614591744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936084374467072,0.0,0.0,0.05860158868666367,0.07132787765292943,0.07351597019543372,0.0,0.16294861148114073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14027132904230924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06961803327384887,0.0,0.06664323627455561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06025414854355051,0.0702928966498404,0.0,0.2246649755199368,0.06153678561895767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1375915023413107,0.04860045275111567,0.06531920934829856,0.0,0.0,0.11573210727984873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217090454071565,0.0652603160141119,0.0,0.11412021985896954,0.054409589766753697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031693124894108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04559889405712046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3071891385428103,0.0,0.0,0.06750900992953822,0.06046794985867896,0.0,0.07084249516534308,0.03738736051234907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04805141022274604,0.19941533877093,0.1363673231521082,0.0,0.0,0.057127839528908035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09082074615523128,0.0,0.0683450076670708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165063788482536,0.06869063426914307,0.0,0.05430068149606085,0.0,0.05000967919852802,0.0,0.052468721725628116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652763607689264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13829611714502654,0.15521902575345933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736695682111364,0.06494207507104582,0.094326498169856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431008406303679,0.0,0.0651536762475686,0.0,0.0,0.13019052811213874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609627975136832,0.07743272641680553,0.0871631741603261,0.06994589284192622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409997186077869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056274895709249935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05764136951889665,0.10474521967121844,0.06728314254955889,0.0,0.0963035861736114,0.0,0.054328630307154936,0.0,0.0,0.1422388894029585,0.07787776495362142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05114989060419229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22597964893135886,0.0,0.0,0.0540080066766848,0.19834341340625644,0.0,0.0,0.06500532242673647,0.07558353324013645,0.04618772112508386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058755844267644165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054569345967742815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06138625003565794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990529074343714,0.06908749312225777,0.06932810687823887,0.09665273673912952,0.0,0.0,0.04380891571927322
mentalhealth,abigail_benmajin,2020/04/04,"Looking for advice, feeling unwell :( (Mentions of self harm, suicidal thoughts and eating disorders!) About a year ago at this time, I was a senior in highschool who dealt with a lot of suicidal thoughts and heavy depression. I was in the ER several times but never hospitalized. Once I entered college (September of 2019) I started to make really good progress on my health. I got back on my feet and back on track mentally, I stopped self harming, I stopped feeling sad almost all together. I still struggled with my eating disorder and anxiety but my depression seemed to almost completely disappear. I know it was still there, but it was no longer something I thought about. Fast forward to now, I’ve been home for three weeks since my college closed due to the virus. I woke up thinking about a lot of heavy stuff and (this sounds stupid) started reading a bunch of fanfics and shit involving suicide and self harm because it’s been my way of coping with thoughts of wanting to hurt myself. I know it doesn’t help, it probably feeds into it, but I can’t stop. I’m so scared I’ll fall back into that awful mindset of wanting to die. I know it heavily involves being at home because I don’t like being home, but I don’t know how to cope. I’m transferring colleges but the price is insane so I can’t dorm. I also can’t get an apartment, so being home is my only choice. My dad also lost his job yesterday, and I don’t like him so that means he’s going to be at home (he’s not looking for another job as far as I know because he’s old). I’m trying so so hard to not give into the urges to self harm but this is the first day in such a long time that I’ve had a sort of mental relapse, and it offers me quick relief (even though it’s awful and I always regret it). I’m not really sure what I’m looking for. Advice? Encouragement? I’m tired and sad. Sorry for the long post.",2.9428149999999995,4.786149104000002,4.1787125,85.97566875000004,75.29333333333334,7.140833333333332,27.18541666666667,7.972316293177498,1.730961666666667,1474,58,292,23,32,483,186,375,0.27,0.662,0.068,-0.9981,2,0,1,0,0,3,46.0,0,0,0,3,23,21,2,2,14,2,21,7,2,2,3,58,55,30,4,3,10,1,3,2,0,0,2,1,6,4,19,18,3,3,14,1,1,5,12,15,1,2,14,7,33,6,45,37,4,51,0,7,3,0,18,17,1,6,31,181,52,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460094098835707,0.06622496166389369,0.0,0.14962040997174245,0.0,0.0,0.11948941388728165,0.06216381728768721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833883052445753,0.057152129463457324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723396745299114,0.0,0.1366256168926377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833089513563007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048181081442674106,0.0,0.1286933895050686,0.0,0.07753607771383074,0.0,0.17124582000946967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15289177967968864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049344545827456884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755501628261918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354738047355182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03903233413555485,0.07166761634340504,0.04245880844482665,0.0626623086847227,0.059751558726172174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692452987906343,0.0,0.0,0.07941210251774923,0.0,0.0,0.05007582317349822,0.0,0.3746957573145668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07997745823139578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482741769839745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20529037958628615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299802220252162,0.0,0.0,0.13223010998011095,0.18821006406098573,0.0,0.08155362591725558,0.12702972689716924,0.0,0.0,0.04986879308144483,0.0,0.0,0.08137993000423979,0.0,0.0,0.15057806601307425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05762013499671174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783944580705636,0.07956257569569124,0.0,0.056819510264556165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155050661512971,0.0,0.08054886591283902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472915056737274,0.0,0.095720911367405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07479667528107296,0.0,0.0,0.06801220697681283,0.3117508432500376,0.08439982954158795,0.07668764640442964,0.06180000162094741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05751458677873461,0.0,0.08363053428421274,0.10575873498516268,0.0,0.11932530122820473,0.18738004037246456,0.0,0.0781019981012574,0.08552385463734365,0.2451583417373091,0.0,0.07041228546214286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047870467824277896,0.0734011476188392,0.237242191787102,0.13069013934747567,0.08586692866468291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05072246166648817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813052896756829,0.05930047381434191,0.05992699989502113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04811010359665612
mentalhealth,hokkil,2020/04/04,"am I a bad person?? Guys, please help me. I've been suffering from social anxiety and guilty thoughts. So, I have a long distance relationship for about 7 months. I've been working online for like 4 months. Now, because of the COVID, my boyfriend doesn't have a job and he today went to hiking, he's now drinking a beer, he's happy. On the other hand, I've been working everyday, not happy with my life, I want to be with him but can't travel because of the covid. And, I think, I am jealous because he's happy and I am not. Am I a bad person? Please, tell me something. Why do I get this envy feelings!?!?!",1.8308797653958961,3.576541032258067,3.5563636363636384,89.64318181818182,78.19354838709677,5.799413489736072,24.175953079178885,6.574015621080383,0.7231870967741938,464,16,98,4,11,155,73,124,0.152,0.667,0.18100000000000002,-0.4586,1,0,3,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,2,4,8,1,0,8,0,13,4,1,0,0,13,19,6,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,6,2,0,3,3,0,2,4,4,0,0,5,2,13,4,11,13,0,10,0,1,0,0,12,1,0,0,8,57,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750074474811124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564929800820013,0.2808926261762412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15046589371985705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766290146366835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024772433225409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15208447975807873,0.0,0.4905183342656557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295235841602232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15242062182188654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108489605064774,0.07503939095934938,0.0,0.0,0.13592788708531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451981934743334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26822871944102683,0.0,0.3372052141376172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490493829800287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15657207922826344,0.0,0.1182459314084213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13424993127194434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841830345778484,0.0,0.12193830082255523,0.0,0.0,0.14559132747808134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059507393644396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238530365594915,0.13859676525421666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236398631852359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tierneae,2020/04/04,"Friend recovering from almost dying & facing her mortality Over a year ago, my friend experienced a traumatic medical situation leaving her in intensive care and hospital recovery for weeks. She has since physically recovered. However, the stress associated with the pandemic is causing historic trauma to resurface, causing her intense emotional distress. 

Right now, she is confronting how this hospital event caused her to face her mortality head on.

I'm seeking advice on books and supportive techniques to help her work through this. I'd really appreciate any recommendations that you may have. 

Further context info: she's in her mid 20s, has many friends and a supportive family, and is gainfully employed. She loves books. She is staying with me and my partner as it's a better location during the pandemic.",8.660666666666664,11.145473918518519,8.992037037037038,54.63916666666671,61.66666666666666,13.103703703703706,43.87037037037037,12.340626583579946,6.964792592592592,669,41,86,26,10,221,96,135,0.091,0.7020000000000001,0.20600000000000002,0.9432,2,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,3,2,12,1,2,7,0,8,5,3,4,0,14,13,7,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,16,8,14,12,0,15,0,0,0,1,19,8,0,2,6,56,20,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15067894117547134,0.13668580827576526,0.0,0.15440542476515318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16707173907723125,0.0,0.10485884219301353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637418850898014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721351030924333,0.4752065461208709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003152265508447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17345019998828853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536264635891527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3573952771880689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582499959458052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335459913562553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16327172740401755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1391682746444759,0.0,0.0,0.1563309513542589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533665452780046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987821646885147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13168288631657682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755285863167606,0.1733232184291145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643528499492371,0.0,0.0,0.1766314595591408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3499605034077282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368705413171335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225681842495296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929742850912067
mentalhealth,euphemisticguy,2020/04/04,"I don't know what I want to do I am currently a first year engineering student. I also have a scholarship from a government-funded organization (luckily). I am even planning to run for student councik for the next academic year despite how my seniors have said that the 2nd year of chemical engineering in our uni will be one of the hardest.

Quarantine has been the equivalent of me having nothing to do for weeks during summer vacation and me ending up reflecting too much and feeling and thinking about many things about myself.

I wanted the challenge and made the promise to myself to study Math and Chemistry in advance to keep up with my studies, hence, choosing the course.

I originally wanted to take a course on theater performance arts back in early high school, but we were reminded early on how it's our best bet to choose a career path that has more certainty to it: finance-wise, majorly. I wanted to my job to consist of my passion of singing and performing in front of an audience... but at the same time, I thought about how it may ruin the fun for me since it will be my source of income.

Yet, I can't keep up with the pace that my classmates have. I don't have this study habit because I always let laziness win over me. The anticipation, making everything seem negative. I hate this about myself, because I feel greatly towards this with academics-- the thing I should be improving on and preparing for even in quarantine... I made it barely alive in my first Calculus subject, and in our second semester, I'm still doing what I did last time, with only a bit of more activity compared to last time.

I am now questioning myself about my decisions. But I guess my studies is not a question because I want a diploma for myself, even if it's just a bachelor's degree. I have come to a point this year that I don't want to excel in anyway with this course and line of job: I just wanted to finish my studies and make myself free and explore what I really want.

Somehow, the thought and feeling of being under a spotlight satisfies me. I want to be a known person somehow. YouTube has been intriguing me since 2013 when I discovered its magical world. The first and last content I made was back in 2015 when I did a cover of Hunter Hayes' Invisible. I think I did not have the confidence to do anymore content. Whenever I come across that video which had less than a thousand views, something sparks in my heart. Passion.

But it always dies. This quarantine, I have already thought of 2 ideas to post. Every month, I will have some idea about a content that I want to work on and post... but nothing has manifested. 

I feel dry when I try hard to achieve.

I feel so lowkey angry at myself to just settle with the happiness I gain when watching other content creators, and leaving myself with nothing created.

""What sparks joy in you?"" that's the phrase that has been echoing through my mind for some days now.

Now, I don't know.

What should I do? I feel like a blank slate wanting to be striped and colored, but at the same time, my actions don't correspond.

I want assurance and I want to create. So much happening right now. Anything is good.",5.504223170731707,6.6669779483333365,5.9686504065040635,78.33534146341466,67.85,9.053658536585363,33.300813008130085,9.310311815833133,3.0774959349593503,2499,112,452,48,41,806,274,600,0.075,0.804,0.121,0.9884,4,3,1,0,0,0,73.0,4,1,0,14,34,17,1,0,35,0,52,3,1,9,1,100,94,34,1,16,12,0,7,1,0,6,0,1,0,1,31,27,0,2,24,3,3,7,9,2,0,6,16,11,75,16,83,65,12,76,0,1,3,2,9,29,0,11,39,347,106,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845549087930137,0.05685492879349671,0.11831405947835473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050748713480075,0.0,0.0,0.05850541850767321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933587732366684,0.0,0.13001720348425408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461018763828313,0.0,0.07761771287676618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248470427012167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045850621665966235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378575279489408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296938129839752,0.0,0.0,0.14087343211913314,0.0,0.059900901942093965,0.0,0.0638959197919009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21568768251916656,0.050790535001051455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814210150153692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059631409719137066,0.0,0.07838287861612467,0.07831954763468688,0.0,0.06286938661984133,0.07568232619363968,0.0636874725053345,0.07019194301733657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424833663147227,0.0,0.07511614475583753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160516001496954,0.0,0.0,0.14110233702025868,0.12638563428479813,0.0,0.0,0.07814429435148844,0.1738566070920915,0.0,0.07527971437598151,0.0,0.07269981617650248,0.0,0.034733598729554165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20181642850004944,0.09491340152819856,0.07207952995409103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07178604038850743,0.0,0.05674763315951443,0.0,0.10452653084248822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561071538625369,0.0,0.0,0.20465372843461688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048176051735805685,0.054071220287683484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207772071240414,0.0,0.0,0.06720808944417188,0.0,0.1361793928482834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15928613451214274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04554550418145188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060715043735568526,0.06762796219033876,0.0,0.0,0.07195229370320051,0.0,0.06472253999677265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762162277945305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054732676803938986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05677684142791022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053454858174598864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094465188029015,0.0911100640941511,0.0,0.16932530860339834,0.16582509027111447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0482690784473921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5451404623864265,0.0,0.05702840445854699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05175826434956267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18313230772499592
mentalhealth,earthling9999,2020/04/04,"Advice for anxiety. Hi I'm 20 y/o female who dealt with depression, suicidalness and anxiety a year ago. I've been trying to improve and I've come a long way. I've learnt to handle the former two but still have a hard time getting hold of the latter. It's quarantine so can't really visit a doctor, can u guys advice me on how to deal with it?",0.5530479452054813,2.7041484657534265,3.6482020547945235,85.15942636986303,84.89041095890411,6.937671232876713,18.71404109589041,8.07648339933343,0.9763164383561648,270,7,56,6,8,97,57,73,0.10300000000000001,0.867,0.03,-0.4019,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,6,0,4,1,0,1,0,8,7,5,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,8,6,0,10,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,6,29,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45531681134245394,0.2065164046627193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3564472367840259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2006855105195552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24018481333867575,0.20065920339321106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384576184219147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12171871615689485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23067978285463026,0.0,0.0,0.20869794329986333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061736708874292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492483949402791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18605244590409584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548345217906295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358483620314695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15817329532282373,0.0,0.22758065513729414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18492303112363312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15002689881735787
mentalhealth,FastMagician5,2020/04/04,"partner having a go at me, I put my hands over my ears and screamed like a banshee I don't really know whether to put this in the 'relationships' or 'mental health' or 'sex workers' sub-reddit. I feel like the lock-down has exacerbated my mental health issues significantly.

I'm a postgraduate student, I had 2 part-time jobs as well now suspended because of lock-down. It's meant my money is almost all gone, and I've started camming (I'm a 28 year old F) to make rent.

I've spent many years in therapy when I was younger from the age of 15. I've always had anxiety, OCD and Body Dysmorphic Disorder. I've done a lot better since my adulthood generally, although I have 'episodes' where I become obsessed with something, for example, last year I stopped sleeping, dyed my hair a colour and decided the colour made me hideous, became suicidal, crying all day everyday for a number of weeks.

Recently I had a brief few weeks where my OCD became stuck on 'contamination' and I washed everything in the house repeatedly and felt unclean. A few days ago I became convinced I had a deadly disease (obviously my obsessive mind is being fed with covid19 fears)  and had only a year to live. I was inconsolable, which obviously put a strain on my partner who didn't know how to talk sense to me. These episodes do pass with time, but how long I'm in that irrational state of mind varies.

I tried to spend time with my partner last night, being affectionate suggesting we watch a film, as I spend all day alone in lock-down they are still working (not a key-worker, but just work for a shitty company who insists they come in or lose their job). They were in a bad mood and said they wanted to be alone. I said okay and went and started camming. Before I knew it, it was pretty late. I checked my phone where my partner had text me saying that they guessed we weren't in a relationship because I was too busy having cyber-sex with strangers. He apologised when I confronted him (I began camming only with his blessing, I'm also a non-nude cam model).

This morning, it sounds so silly typing it out, he made himself some soup. I said oh it looks great. I went to taste some picked up the bowl, but sloshed some liquid out by accident. He became nasty and pissed off at me, about how I couldn't let him have anything good and have to ruin everything. And why would I do something like that. And I just, get this urge sometimes where I don't know what to do. Like a real pent-up energy. And I just put my hands over my ears and screamed as loud as I could. 

He looked petrified, stood up a bit shellshocked and went upstairs. I tried to talk to him but he won't speak to me. I think he is being unfair to me, because he resents me partly because of camming and partly because of having to put up with my erratic mental health. I shouldn't have screamed but it didn't really feel like a conscious decision either.",5.620537607269057,6.044824319787987,6.0610267541645655,80.41110600706716,67.28621908127208,9.083412417970722,31.365774861181226,9.002800196639251,2.482007733467945,2279,86,447,37,35,736,276,566,0.139,0.773,0.08800000000000001,-0.9829,3,5,2,0,0,0,70.0,2,0,6,5,19,28,3,4,27,1,42,15,8,7,5,84,79,39,2,5,14,0,6,5,4,3,4,12,1,4,18,30,2,1,12,1,6,13,9,13,1,0,32,24,68,14,58,37,13,68,1,2,5,1,37,24,1,9,35,272,86,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279873576319543,0.0,0.0709398114738296,0.14674557970379618,0.0,0.05665374460531857,0.058947699444413776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05419529715539849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05829839397389462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05915159645846081,0.2159285511624577,0.07824138817775725,0.060282838180889975,0.0,0.0,0.06265556561524968,0.07734305847327423,0.07869146806860833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061025642816135074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656299305469336,0.0,0.07781856484821094,0.13706513041077958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08119310854346311,0.0,0.0,0.07249778252340387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12733964136549364,0.0,0.0,0.07971894730674807,0.07164148672924213,0.10122161998543212,0.06802113778920077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037012950646007896,0.0,0.04026215229657908,0.05942040080559439,0.0,0.07810551663298464,0.07804240975159159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259108733526465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817442094917508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394249965949479,0.14060303889913073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168016649171794,0.11549427082997488,0.0799148686390734,0.0,0.0,0.07244256401194007,0.0,0.17305346021934187,0.0,0.06255635492334857,0.06269451523976187,0.11898186407843975,0.07925606775183502,0.0,0.06022884765092655,0.0,0.13406819355893926,0.0472887727054517,0.0718244727053036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141816002992928,0.0,0.14306404333630182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648208765974394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433862903021232,0.0,0.0,0.10775977280009318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301507274884596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207359221197747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3560878262335925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063573037000045,0.09076867798703818,0.0,0.06994968527097913,0.1521194125639204,0.0,0.0,0.20216597115224114,0.05633781665530475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05860270620699886,0.0,0.07089494169784104,0.0,0.0,0.10907800463450716,0.07006630906767393,0.0,0.10028718305176523,0.0,0.05657593355602668,0.059228571558705125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07749159599890587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138830923607977,0.0,0.0,0.0810160355749281,0.0,0.0,0.04539383314428371,0.0,0.0,0.08261915468662244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961965514942457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041785496452181416,0.0,0.1136532128350108,0.0,0.06369706546767846,0.1970186791259428,0.06392549165395837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15472534493843726,0.0,0.0,0.05032538811346565,0.0,0.0,0.1824842843180428
mentalhealth,TheGreatBillingsby,2020/04/04,"I'm going to kill myself Since I'll never be able to have a personal IRL relationship again due to coronavirus, I will be swallowing some potassium cyanide today. Goodbye world, you picked the wrong time to isolate this guy.",9.727804878048783,8.856716048780493,9.097682926829274,66.34945121951222,59.24390243902439,13.078048780487805,40.012195121951216,12.161744961471696,5.050404878048783,182,8,30,5,2,58,35,41,0.22,0.78,0.0,-0.8625,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,4,1,0,1,1,3,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,3,1,7,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,5,17,4,0,0.33049017064924296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18782518012893606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272372285333622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3656384076308975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25489439367744804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28857126941078226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3548227607836298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27338488435224345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927114762371236,0.0,0.31326603857412805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613391203887884,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Manic_Sloth,2020/04/04,"I noticed that I have just two emotional settings: I've noticed emotionally I seek different than others. 

Either I'm emotionally ""off"": Where I can comprehend emotional responses but don't feel them. 

For example I understand other people's anger in the sense that anger comes with other responses such as violence, rejection, avoidance, irritability, frustration etc. I understand the anger but I don't have an emotional response.

OR

Emotionally ON to the max setting: where all the emotions of myself and others are so strong that I can't maintain an awareness of my experience outside of the emotion. 

For example I see a stranger cry and I am struggling to hold back tears. I see someone express joy and I soar along with them. A friend tells me of a loss in their life and I am wrecked for days, having meltdowns of tears and grief. 

At first I was concerned that means I'm a psychopath because of the reduced emotional response but I do have emotional responses they are just either one or the other: really strong or or there at all. 

What is wrong with me.",5.746099656357387,7.764679005154643,6.241628865979383,73.34890378006875,68.22680412371135,9.915601374570443,35.613745704467355,10.203070172399654,4.146525498281786,853,44,141,23,15,276,108,194,0.258,0.616,0.126,-0.988,1,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,4,4,8,14,4,2,13,0,15,1,0,0,2,29,24,14,1,0,11,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,10,10,0,2,4,0,0,1,3,10,0,3,1,3,23,4,23,23,5,14,0,3,2,0,7,8,0,4,3,112,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06185288665288551,0.0,0.04903507459087241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929136817098673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835883701678131,0.0518767192304857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404198886709585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9048342980800316,0.0,0.0,0.08971112643369507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868510887756436,0.0,0.0,0.04067254685238863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06842166086665429,0.0,0.0,0.0621472339598378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05681668418039215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762202203471788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18316144175037294,0.0,0.0,0.05450777805673352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05576650957292937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0515315004853228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819947771877482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815599110408949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840926626285785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030752800476428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857754614614297,0.16748037799283852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794778988192786,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FewPeace,2020/04/04,"Been having some real tough mental health issues during this pandemic. Could use some advice. I've been really anxious, depressed and suicidal since the quarantine happned just from mainly being inside most of the time and feeling scared and hopeless. 

I've been in a mental hospital before but I feel like If I went to one again I would be wasting resources like a bed in ER that someone that actually has the virus can use. And that I'll be judged for feeling like this when there are people that are actually sick that can use the hospital bed. 

I feel like I can't take it anymore but I don't want to seem like a burden during these rough times.",6.0137800000000015,6.812829048000001,6.268550000000001,77.95002500000002,66.52,8.81,29.225,8.841846274778883,2.3069399999999995,521,17,93,8,8,167,80,125,0.18100000000000002,0.68,0.139,-0.5884,0,1,0,0,0,2,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,10,0,1,7,0,16,2,0,3,0,23,27,8,1,4,4,0,5,5,0,1,2,0,2,0,9,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,5,1,1,4,5,6,5,7,18,4,7,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,5,9,61,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.2832257277677222,0.0,0.0,0.14180625760266027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639404471141795,0.14391666873993791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348353442508675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586379325897975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498871105956527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935012437950929,0.31101397445475143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15425215505467146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15146402322302516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3544831921856933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29248679294556984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09833476075532883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006055754337676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16517445574074596,0.09296540699775133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528702788660264,0.0,0.0,0.13210869834170322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200419473880908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295682044289513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587340020964576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091096198301047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16923730766132436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3760024364732887,0.0,0.0,0.08559352786508279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13452453788606214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308666584207002,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jimminecraftguy,2020/04/04,"Problems with music So i have this problem since i remember myself listening to music. I've listened to thousands of songs of many genres but they all sound depressing to me for some odd reason. I tried looking for more upbeat music and stuff (even started listening to some very hardcore electronic music) but nothing gets this feeling off, everything sounds the same. Can someone explain or at least tell me that there are others out there that have the same problem. Is this just fattige from listening to music overall?",6.899580745341615,9.110345076086961,6.2096273291925455,73.95152173913044,65.63043478260869,8.300621118012423,35.96894409937888,8.841846274778883,3.5871596273291932,425,21,61,7,7,130,66,92,0.153,0.828,0.02,-0.9212,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,1,1,19,14,5,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,7,3,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,9,7,0,14,14,7,4,0,1,1,0,7,3,0,3,1,52,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18854323313508276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445852074247303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19673840576752405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068534303054564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436923843608178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838257278175721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219361088755756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21004600605556392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.628389821386234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250716072154385,0.0,0.0,0.24797758295652406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18108112869166235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18547816251393476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15494264237708666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25059475277655235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19133330605236007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14862265967116084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18062019951998676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RoundAboutRandy,2020/04/04,"Really struggling mentally I worked so hard to get to where I was. I went from dropping out of high school and then dropping out of college due to depression and psychosis, to having a decent job with good pay, plans to go back to college, and being stable for roughly 6 months. 

Now, I'm depressed again. I wake up and just stare at the ceiling. There's nothing to do. I'm not eating or drinking right and am losing weight. I'm staying up till 1 or 2 AM and not getting up till 11AM. I'm not guaranteed a job at the end of this pandemic and I don't even know when it will all end. I share a room with my sister who spends all her time in it so it's not even like I get space to myself. I can't focus long enough to read or write and the thought of walking my dog makes my body ache. 

I shower when I can and try to brush my teeth but I feel so angry and sad. I've completely go back to how I was before and I have no idea how to stop. I desperately want a fag and to just get smashed but I know once I start, I won't stop.

Idk, I just needed to vent. I just want all of this to go away and to go back to normal",1.193606557377045,2.4016831147541002,3.0475081967213136,94.9429836065574,78.50819672131148,6.027540983606558,21.21639344262295,6.508806274219699,0.08844655737704876,856,22,209,7,20,287,133,244,0.172,0.7879999999999999,0.04,-0.9851,3,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,20,8,0,1,7,0,13,6,3,3,3,48,35,28,0,4,13,1,4,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,6,17,3,2,5,2,2,6,8,5,0,0,4,6,25,3,37,28,4,42,0,4,1,0,5,14,0,3,20,136,31,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995878890232807,0.2945322158037241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864557485893532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14182278145486754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338691869595127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219939774596945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12507698462354375,0.0,0.13064767230779986,0.0,0.0,0.2261717057028273,0.13192671972284206,0.0,0.16866178330709133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455842777418135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668283990275496,0.0,0.2902520726176769,0.1070912352285142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437546305381904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490005963962529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14413424867209054,0.0,0.0,0.2534037621498693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403382721887227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062377596125918575,0.0,0.0,0.11299205303318795,0.0,0.14284033900524815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08522684150239658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286705790620858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191230024529656,0.0,0.0,0.09467249127295414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509848373763038,0.12251161300960313,0.0,0.0,0.13597415556588094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12771372791422048,0.0,0.08179454963198418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090373187757901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921814269515303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037197801592832,0.1360890134845764,0.0,0.21349101665584866,0.0,0.13347799699754614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013630039336351,0.07445075436190153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866857795014422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506169722530549,0.0,0.0,0.15547883953882172,0.0,0.11835987542234284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09295196086400434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,innerpeace002,2020/04/04,"Advice for person who wants to improve his life. These are the views of Richard Dawkins. Same can be applied to india. I know that most people in India do believe that time has an element of good and bad. I'm not calling for extreme measures. But steps has to taken to achieve better future. We do live in post Periyar india/Tamil nadu.  Religion, culture and behaviour are all intertwined. Still....",2.543972602739725,5.518103739726031,3.09809589041096,85.85289726027398,86.94520547945206,5.111780821917809,27.84794520547945,6.742157984588678,1.7415873972602742,315,15,52,4,10,98,59,73,0.045,0.8440000000000001,0.111,0.6369,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,2,0,8,1,0,0,1,10,12,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,3,2,10,10,3,7,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,1,3,35,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30133189759659224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574729100807023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3474231284400764,0.0,0.2727248591344359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31487638417348224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258642951831772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16947000796287998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21780817799070507,0.0,0.0,0.2722930184558359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137823074014018,0.2692534857664419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2953295948463468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24626165860852375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798108204950205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188238382146216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MinnieTyco,2020/04/04,"Feel like I'm going to have a breakdown soon for no reason (?) I feel so empty. I've been having trouble concentrating and holding a conversation without it becoming some ramble or rant. I've been talking less to people and finding that I'm statting to dissociate and think about going back to my old habits recently. (I had anorexia) it's like something us triggering me, but there's nothing to complain about. I'm getting anxious and irritable and I want to talk to my friends and family but I just feel like I have nothing to give. Nothing bad has happened as of late. It's almost like I'm just a body and mind but my soul left me, and I can't explain what it's like cause I'm also numb. I want to express but how can I express nothing? It's just weird and I feel like it's just a building feeling of emptiness but I don't need anyone stressing over me, I just feel like it's getting overwhelming  although I feel nothing. I don't know right now.. this was just a bit of a rant honestly I guess.",1.997758620689656,4.195336596059113,3.7143128078817753,86.51107512315274,79.59113300492609,6.030443349753695,28.376600985221682,7.1686216300943375,1.6263657142857153,791,37,156,10,20,264,104,203,0.11199999999999999,0.68,0.20800000000000002,0.9599,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,0,15,16,0,2,6,0,12,2,1,4,0,45,37,20,0,3,13,0,7,7,1,0,1,0,0,0,10,9,0,1,12,0,0,2,5,7,0,0,4,7,21,9,18,33,3,11,1,1,0,0,10,3,0,4,13,99,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569447694733068,0.0,0.0,0.0844094138222489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924303428291322,0.0,0.07380399077878094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08116250877872601,0.0881310073763449,0.0,0.11657322492507445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523478764607754,0.1172438068967444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10843035990172538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995044629937948,0.0,0.3735897035234483,0.30162375562750204,0.0,0.0,0.09647206437722362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154874727424809,0.0,0.1102924966258296,0.10125451768122766,0.11997458237764234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162767634566768,0.0,0.0933387515305824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058008287229768765,0.0,0.1190665729952993,0.0,0.11468190137540925,0.0,0.0,0.3609695658125533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657682136622952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826502323092746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5063970594483644,0.0,0.1107584352014882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317604832531509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085244153883746,0.10421927044553818,0.0,0.0,0.09014031607577623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812586219696671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090876832172197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16967642893524693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763307303952246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269653340533649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451389705559468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101747779827625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,divyani_puri,2020/04/04,"How to remove negativity??  Positive thinking always helps us to grow in our life but negative thinking can never help us to achieve anything in our life. We can feel stress, anxiety, depression because of any mental health issues.Deep breathing, meditation helps us to achieve positivity in our life.

For more info. click on-- [https://myfitbrain.in/blog/how-to-fight-with-negativity](https://myfitbrain.in/blog/how-to-fight-with-negativity)",14.860952380952385,20.508129857142862,11.228571428571426,31.183095238095266,54.00000000000001,9.447619047619048,36.11904761904762,9.725611199111238,4.763390476190477,376,15,37,8,6,110,41,56,0.272,0.575,0.153,-0.8833,0,0,0,0,2,0,35.0,7,0,0,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,2,5,1,1,1,8,5,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,2,7,0,10,5,1,7,0,1,1,0,10,4,0,0,1,25,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14935722548344324,0.0,0.0,0.12206521221870713,0.0,0.1373159477582995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477120643578694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942068853660973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15460189249304895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075989214370038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19079863205580588,0.0,0.0,0.3609424101988637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.380355536639248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18089238354117376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844039620769716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20561505491258453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23003092695353985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6477441916514958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mayonnaise123,2020/04/04,"My best friend, former roommate, and at least former heroin and fentanyl user, has been missing for almost a week. My best friend, a prior heavy opioid user who I believe relapsed, has been missing for 5 days. Life is too much.

When I was a senior in high school I got into weed and over the years it escalated until 21/22. I met a friend and eventually roommate trying to sell him mushrooms lol but I helped him get off heroin and live with me because he was basically living in a trap house before. Given his history or serious drug use I’m horrified that he is dead in a ditch with a needle in his arm because no one can reach him and we’ve searched all around his neighborhood and called his friends, coroners office, hospitals, and jails and nothing. I’ve lost 4 people to drugs and suicide since 2018, one on my couch. I found him dead in the morning from mixing fentanyl, oxy, Xanax, and rum. I’ve also witnessed a death involving severe trauma where he fell off a ramp and split his skull on the concrete and I was the only one with him while he died. It was also partially my fault, he was homeless and asked me to buy him cigarettes so I did and I gave him some free benzodiazepines when he was clearly drunk and he fell backwards over a guardrail on a ramp directly on his skull. I’ve lost others to suicide or overdose but I wasn’t there for those. 

Also, my brother is in serious danger with covid 19. He has mitochondrial disease and for someone with his diseases he is fairly healthy and normal and a 19 year old college freshman. Unfortunately mitochondrial disease affects muscle strength so while he can breathe just fine, he needs more time for altitude adjustments and he also gets dehydrated very easily which is why he has a feeding tube but that’s only a partial fix. His specialist said that if he gets sick there’s a 70% chance of him being admitted to the ICU on a ventilator and that’s horrifying because we don’t have enough and if they have to ration them to the people most likely to live, he will die.

The rest of my family is either 54 and older and all have preexisting conditions like autoimmune diseases and type 1 diabetes. 

I’m terrified that I’m going to lose everyone important to me in life or at least a lot of them. I just got a job at a grocery store to help but I’m scared for my own safety even though I’m in my lower 20s and am healthy but I did have an iga deficiency growing up.

I realized that all life is is proteins replicating themselves. So why suffer like I have since childhood with a sick brother, an active alcoholic father, and my own mental and addiction issues? What’s the point of staying here and not being done with it? I guess my brother and mom but if they die due to the virus or unrelated issues I won’t survive. 

I’ve overdosed, had my dad get violent with me and drive drunk with me, I handled my parents divorce alright and I’ve made it through watching my brother starve to death when I was 6-8  before we could figure out what was wrong and what to do. So my entire life I’ve been in crusts more and I can’t take it anymore, I can’t take all of the death.",5.255275974025974,5.978707092532468,6.028012987012987,79.2738051948052,68.17207792207792,8.757402597402598,31.14675324675325,8.841846274778883,2.487834545454546,2483,97,473,40,40,815,297,616,0.212,0.68,0.107,-0.9982,3,0,5,0,1,3,48.0,2,0,4,7,21,27,2,1,32,2,45,19,4,3,5,86,74,62,10,6,17,8,0,3,4,2,12,1,1,0,18,48,4,0,5,3,4,5,7,14,0,3,26,2,61,14,62,43,19,54,0,6,1,0,60,29,0,12,22,311,79,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022490165526473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844947256169415,0.08287612208498596,0.0,0.0,0.2647451441967318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207958062989952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367744592998697,0.07737310356165128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15135637320696074,0.0,0.14085201956173699,0.09324660893692688,0.17371127977827905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451122753493501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608026467087985,0.0,0.0,0.05337588887216452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576876822012184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469623685871952,0.0,0.0,0.1919597692597641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08551726534304077,0.0,0.05466479613305227,0.0,0.0,0.07908448323547304,0.0,0.0,0.0780224687348999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09074637890975328,0.25577283241946863,0.0,0.17296295283196444,0.0,0.04703664951754986,0.0,0.13238775315997842,0.0,0.0911738013395406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094983727465524,0.08744463759297462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549846475245062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276808330143442,0.08213043124327415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23383444950892945,0.12130282896219716,0.0,0.21924620322955332,0.0,0.0,0.09259166905736928,0.18069321583247192,0.07036293482112839,0.0,0.07831323305111372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08340657657987625,0.0,0.0,0.09693211618271097,0.0,0.0,0.06084101252854796,0.06136840644476474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109108033822145,0.07941422434633742,0.0,0.0868468236261267,0.0,0.16824894561846654,0.12589139865032625,0.0,0.0,0.0918995513831905,0.0,0.0,0.11475617818190653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823866685204331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787274515233423,0.0,0.08286113362897457,0.08376151714536277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349968468020753,0.0,0.1369263586473869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012561050711713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821533879476996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18106061567234208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12445635264843367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131514239783033,0.0,0.04826031397681995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056191276662278994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07148146347874136,0.0,0.06828891115580676,0.0,0.0,0.06638823353611578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14936314998837155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904893665004865,0.0,0.10659451661576973
mentalhealth,throwie600,2020/04/04,"Why dont I have normal thoughts During the day I zone out and my mind thinks about completely irrelevant and random scenarios or it’s worrying about how to talk to people and being negative towards myself. Unless I’m consciously talking to myself in my head, which never happens it’s like I’m consumed by my subconscious, I never think of important things.

I don’t think things like “what should I get my sister for her birthday”
or
“how should I approach this uni assignment”
or any observations about my surroundings or things I could say in conversation.

What is wrong with me? What do I do?",6.8237065637065655,7.70674256756757,7.071763191763193,72.60486486486488,64.76576576576576,10.667181467181466,32.97425997425998,10.608840637214634,3.6726205920205928,479,19,82,12,7,155,72,111,0.145,0.855,0.0,-0.9242,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,10,1,1,2,2,25,18,10,0,4,5,1,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,10,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,1,17,2,15,13,0,9,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,5,5,65,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223533988031871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20388124499425936,0.0,0.0,0.15525563950612614,0.0,0.0,0.12540669748115713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278985566585405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159415215171012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17195496728701112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19956583119078986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19000073499733253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19634303578164936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999497156141465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905235640150409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480987038753664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15463756920961688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125894048130429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3875596500291963,0.3737946781371059,0.0,0.15437469897085246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17546442561627001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19747740399394534,0.0,0.0,0.2126048455542634,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,im_fucking_ded,2020/04/04,"Just. Why? So, about a week ago a coworker saw the self harm scars on my arm and she asked me if I had a cat. I was like, “yeah, why?” And then she said “does he scratch you a lot?” I said “uh, no. What makes you think that?” She gestured to my arms and I didn’t say anything, I just rolled my sleeves back down. 

Then, yesterday this coworker made fun of me in front of my other coworkers. I mentioned being sad about the prospect of the X Games getting cancelled and another coworker said (jokingly) “there are people dying and you’re worried about dirt bikes?” My coworker then said “you better be nice to him or he might cut himself.” She laughed and even tried to grab my arm and force me to roll my sleeves up. One of my coworkers laughed and the other was a little bit horrified but she just let it happen. It was hella embarrassing and hella degrading and I just kind of had to let it happen.",1.2271787709497204,3.5915504189944123,2.5351368715083806,92.82784497206707,83.91620111731844,6.261564245810058,22.91648044692737,7.554174236665415,1.0081439106145256,691,25,149,12,20,222,105,179,0.134,0.7859999999999999,0.08,-0.8968,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,3,0,1,11,13,1,1,9,1,12,3,3,2,0,22,24,17,1,1,7,0,2,1,0,1,0,5,0,1,8,10,0,0,1,3,0,1,2,5,1,1,12,8,28,8,17,7,2,13,0,1,1,0,21,5,0,4,8,101,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314910755267614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750474004032194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236072515639351,0.0,0.14042291527052506,0.0,0.0,0.11549962070211947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284555084575386,0.16398672817146698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15589075918423892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131446827234144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921005727210744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784767605034416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26565443973603264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641708251113198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307192895837578,0.0,0.0733833683340235,0.15054649605100634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770029867937122,0.0,0.14212913768587532,0.1002640866328144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15934548910440302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178389452053704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413435899444763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5715235783927357,0.11945033475524905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566982657091062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624633837133348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019804365919303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12048669193389218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27107622661980496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525421159569504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,superlane,2020/04/04,"Finding an old psych evaluation? Long ago as a child I was psychologically evaluated. I was very young and remember very little, but the result dramatically effected the rest of my childhood and how my mother raised me. I just want to find out what the evaluation said, so I can know what it said. Thank you!",4.514736842105265,6.876864333333337,6.245473684210527,70.5903157894737,72.33333333333333,9.472280701754386,27.18947368421053,9.888512548439397,2.8737115789473697,245,9,45,7,5,84,45,57,0.0,0.909,0.091,0.6114,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,0,3,0,0,3,0,13,8,6,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,3,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,8,1,4,4,1,7,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,30,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22065106336195608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4550136524719059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367989936591845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494815402794145,0.0,0.22028487176525788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26119789427352785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28197592204008537,0.0,0.4735566299567465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291705370528606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4107673499474481,0.14681846876740254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,diamandisjewels,2020/04/04,Relapsed after being clean from self harm for over 3 years I don’t know where else to reach out I’ve tried to tell friends I need help and none seem to really care. I relapsed Wednesday and I can’t stop myself now it feels so familiar to what I used to be used to in high school. I feel so depressed and I’m starting to really slip up while being isolated due to the pandemic going on. I don’t know how much more of this I can take but I can’t go back to inpatient care the hospital told me if it happened again they will not release me unless I go home to my family (who tend to worsen my mental state at times and are not good for my school work). All my friends went home from college except for the guy I’ve been hooking up with and I don’t know how to communicate that I’m struggling and want support from him. I’m not sure what to do at this point I almost feel like I’m screaming for help but no one can hear me.,2.8876406926406943,3.636923550505053,4.16914862914863,90.3618181818182,73.59595959595958,7.475324675324676,24.24386724386725,7.7094869923839395,0.921301875901876,725,20,167,9,14,239,116,198,0.133,0.727,0.139,0.0762,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,8,12,0,1,3,0,14,0,0,4,2,33,42,15,0,3,8,0,3,1,2,1,0,2,3,2,8,8,0,1,7,0,0,4,10,4,0,1,3,5,22,8,33,35,4,27,0,1,0,0,12,11,0,3,12,107,30,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680064071524786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105048849511025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27857711569537386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766668827759065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141246796990576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12878888930365798,0.0,0.2072306314903752,0.09759810591934552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110975180321322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329251283439971,0.11458655912499735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352707757336608,0.12080859266949115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15397554286060344,0.0,0.18314091495329524,0.14434172532306178,0.27407287379361434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22524083818819385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667434089382381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376762429145986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004280761005541,0.10129862631251738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257416563912343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291457597773551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17503871306570454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765242611380032,0.0,0.12436957621815414,0.14251971074059502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096697119797605,0.0,0.0,0.11421663477170164,0.0,0.1428201324058791,0.0,0.0,0.1550295955081381,0.12875844635454847,0.0,0.10271781759967856,0.0,0.1194079262672554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966156845970526,0.0,0.0,0.13054191852935346,0.0,0.09275292396192024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23598377330270726,0.0,0.0,0.08057933293735813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664389232386464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09945767584620893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08797587171619832
mentalhealth,reslave,2020/04/04,"I don’t know I have started spiralling into depression again. With all the existing underlying issues that have resurfaced due to stay at home thing, is driving me insane. I had recovered from a lot things but things are going bad and bad. I am really sorry and scared.",5.167200000000001,7.233169919999997,5.805,75.70750000000002,69.8,9.0,28.5,9.516144504307137,2.8708000000000014,216,8,36,5,4,70,43,50,0.34299999999999997,0.657,0.0,-0.963,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,2,0,7,0,0,0,1,8,10,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,4,0,0,1,0,5,0,6,9,2,9,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,3,30,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4276351379510988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22056284043675156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455371628358901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568708800062979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672828202070805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14073583549248847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21771155062506894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640525296721466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563825106893943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866625591245712,0.1812559843130592,0.2729490781865199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5103880176748394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway-83716,2020/04/04,"Recently diagnosed with BPD Hi 👋  
I have recently been diagnosed with BPD. Just wondering what day to day things you all do to cope to make life that bit more easier and bearable? What are your best coping strategies?",3.0584999999999987,6.0781378500000045,3.7550000000000026,82.39,83.0,9.2,25.5,9.3871,3.1006,174,7,31,6,5,55,32,40,0.0,0.825,0.175,0.825,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,1,7,6,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,5,5,4,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22964031709268984,0.0,0.2388970831093878,0.0,0.5511976055888917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28224433235085034,0.0,0.0,0.4441996959125067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15456053631336936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14606546581111685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4321208937303922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537569479367388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373032572981999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Doggorina,2020/04/04,"Exam stress, loss, demotivation, epidemic, anxiety/depression and what not. Enjoy. I haven't been on this subreddit for ages but I figured I should talk to more people about this. This year so far my life has been a series of downs and as much as I try to tell myself that things will get better it feels like they will only get worst. So for most of January I was going through a lot of exam stress due to my AS mocks coming up, and despite studying really hard for it, probably harder than most people, I got terrible grades, and with my actual exams so close I felt like I would have to repeat a year. Despite the pressure and anxiety it left me very demotivated, which I know sounds weird as I needed to work harder than ever now, but I felt as if no matter what I do I will be doing the wrong thing so I didn't know what to do anymore. I considered tuition but the whole coronavirus thing made me realise that it might be impossible for a while. Then my grandfather died a week after and although we weren't ""close"" we still had a relationship and I like to think he loved me, it filled me with dread that he was actually gone. I have never had to deal with a loss of a family member before  so it came as a bit of a shock, and I am the most sorry for my dad because he was his father, and it just felt really weird how changed and depressive the atmosphere had become in my house, and I felt too inadequate to help myself let alone anyone else. Then quarantine happened, and homeschool is harder than I thought, and with everything going on I obviously couldn't focus, and the increased stress regarding my studies didn't help at all. So I fell into what felt like depression for a few days, and a lot of emotional ups and downs. Then things seemed to be getting better for a while, with my dad and cousins seemingly being able to keep distracted and with more closure, and us spending more family time together. But then on Monday we found out that we all (parents, brother and I) have covid, and although I am asymptomatic and my mother and brother have it quite mild, my dad has it the most severe and despite the hospital saying it would get better within 7 days he has had it for a bit longer and seems to be getting worst each day. He hasn't needed hospitalization yet but it looks like a future possibility, and considering most people survive it I don't even want to consider it as a possibility that he may not be able to but sadly I know I do and it makes me so anxious and sad. I literally wake up with heavy breathing and anxiety (at times when I can sleep that is), my sleep cycle is fucked and I can't seem to normalise it which really doesn't help. My mum doesn't make it easier as she is the most expressive about her anxiety and pretty much worships the worst case scenario, which makes it hard for me to not think about it and fill my head with even more negativity. I have also been having an unhealthy relationship with food as I feel hungry without having any appetite. I know this sounds very privileged of me but I miss the luxury of snacks and crave it now more than ever. In a way it makes me realise how I took it all for granted but I can't help wanting it back, especially now when I feel the constant urge to binge eat more than before, and we're not exactly able to shop for ourselves so we rely more on essentials. Sorry about the long rant but this seemed like the only place I could get it out now.",6.6068966754365,6.147316659292034,7.1679909112652505,76.30926213824446,65.29793510324485,10.45657338754684,31.00869010603524,9.966358637471284,2.7759361715698,2717,86,533,53,37,897,289,678,0.175,0.7240000000000001,0.10099999999999999,-0.9956,1,2,0,0,0,0,55.0,6,0,1,8,30,36,2,6,32,0,58,11,5,7,8,130,107,74,1,10,16,10,10,6,0,8,1,3,0,0,46,56,3,1,22,1,3,10,19,23,0,0,25,14,71,13,84,65,29,67,1,7,1,2,38,22,1,16,40,402,117,5,0.1861279040991558,0.0,0.12108932341854865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425745846928392,0.0,0.04961547255397843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04219111912840666,0.0,0.14238733718137744,0.07009051747682618,0.061529622268858414,0.04338165274515257,0.06357001110922249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477069564207954,0.0,0.03782061425403288,0.06852121558359009,0.10558742494698516,0.0,0.0,0.16461500565201348,0.1354689763811741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07096024575000337,0.0,0.0,0.06563288095251962,0.053444236163492614,0.0,0.0670460470606182,0.0,0.04953599535259229,0.0,0.0,0.12003710016663373,0.06396323209246223,0.1603116910647133,0.0,0.06439045954954138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06348510425854499,0.05182866015461466,0.06978961332685234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195715016228088,0.11224223018753207,0.0,0.0,0.05575991953592755,0.0,0.11697654868361824,0.0,0.09411186083030497,0.04432327062618355,0.29785329448052456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502220015024351,0.06802654659945788,0.0,0.057357416038193415,0.1944882954917366,0.0,0.07052051814585561,0.0,0.04962116267190722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0548640969660135,0.0,0.11115602855111203,0.0,0.0636736425024555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16634348094644258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158887043988749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05514634440797879,0.0,0.0,0.13638803790357654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740950413554336,0.06344279749756936,0.043822547707102255,0.18186538451852385,0.0,0.0,0.054905779341395324,0.05210018731092686,0.0,0.0,0.10549285871217624,0.055995900122680485,0.0587062410810225,0.16565576172406446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581743090013961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121695044267236,0.09200765498094317,0.04785110468752876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943724388746591,0.0,0.0,0.06889100358324014,0.0,0.0,0.12903765301363654,0.0,0.06482134815954416,0.0,0.0,0.13988749709354045,0.0,0.06311966421941145,0.06689245374862343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598997898200927,0.0,0.0,0.11923830144329105,0.0,0.0,0.1332211417192707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04933879332223223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28240642236113045,0.0,0.07009051747682618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12417488229700945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13890330008203566,0.0,0.0,0.0495473282149337,0.0,0.2132088852850384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049867519638400935,0.05422799736737372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16487347863835916,0.0795088302875799,0.0,0.04925492172203018,0.07235511845411519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893164999597258,0.042122876375607264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07462965043563663,0.0,0.0,0.1023833425152227,0.07318870683026098,0.04924655557769985,0.04976685920207974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926838597201643,0.0,0.059806885853946425,0.0,0.045167776985608095,0.0,0.0,0.08814661520105628,0.06783388142817855,0.0,0.07990684519787478
mentalhealth,6_monkey,2020/04/04,"I have a serious mental behaviour... PLEASE HELP. (19M). The problem is:I'm soo naughty and have rage outbursts... When I see a animal I don't like, I try to hurt it. Like last time, I tried to hurting pet bird by doing something mischievous like not letting it sleep in the night by playing loud music near its cage. Or not feeding it for days. Now it's slowly evolving to people too.. I just get sooo angry when people say bad about me. Its like something else is taking over me. I hear auditory hallucinations means voices in my head to do that and this. I can't control it.

Now I'm getting these kinds of thoughts of killing. And have a thirst for blood. Please help.",1.5602272727272748,4.044598810606061,2.6813939393939417,91.51209090909094,83.62121212121212,5.035151515151517,23.193939393939395,6.42735559955562,0.5702993939393948,521,19,106,5,15,166,91,132,0.215,0.6759999999999999,0.109,-0.9378,0,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,1,8,13,2,0,5,0,9,5,4,1,0,11,17,6,1,1,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,1,0,10,3,2,1,2,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,1,5,11,6,15,15,0,12,0,2,1,0,4,4,0,1,12,63,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291462327634315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17854192774316135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10266254428520326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298043965522832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16633743418623645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16337194419393955,0.0,0.17941549049468727,0.0,0.21339958590526573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3408262787653593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17611699895503696,0.16576892318750544,0.0,0.1297587758998374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16277964892428767,0.0,0.3110832078775645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17340147663408936,0.0,0.0,0.16042320873225213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14938635920207285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207206563401049,0.0,0.0,0.3494793813818306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15232060646644066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659201315403298,0.0,0.0,0.12685155069433662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15930211578624315,0.0,0.0,0.24510009470178865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196889277661088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263768178887843,0.0928233089050602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161552547667911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaffeinatedRoman,2020/04/04,"Quarantine has brought back the worse side of my depression Honestly since sophomore of High School (19 now) I've kept it in check almost on my own. The only thing I haven't been able to stop is the black hole that eats my motivation to work on anything, be it passion projects or schooling. Admittedly, that's been pretty fucking bad but at least I've kept the darkest considerations out of my mind, and liked myself overall as a person. 
Don't worry, I've made an absolute promise for the sake of others around me that I'll never do anything stupid. (Worst I've ever done is whack my face with a pencil in third grade 'cause I thought Dobby from Harry Potter was a good role model.) 
But God damn, I haven't felt like crying, and been unable to, in a long ass time. I've been napping for an extra 2-7 hours each day, only getting the healthy 8 at night sometimes. Broke quarantine with a couple of my (confirmed healthy) friends today, and despite us hanging out, I just had the good 'ol sense of absolute dread hanging over me. Before this I could at least tell myself I wasn't wasting time because of at least school and work, but now my school is down to 2-3 hours of work a week, and my hours have been cut to at most working one day a week. The nothing to do and still not being able to bring myself to do shit is killing me. I can't take antidepressants because of a risk of bipolar in my family, so I'm stuck almost entirely on my own (I have one anti-seizure med that side effects as an antidepressant). I know I'm not the only person in a rough spot here, there are definitely those with worse problems. At least I'm in a physically secure life position. But damn, I can't figure out what to do on my own, and my friends do care, they aren't able to offer any real advice on this. It's not a situation they're familiar with. There's a whole lot of stuff I have to deal with and really I just don't know what to do.",6.558606138107415,5.423209074168796,6.973118925831201,79.88944820971871,65.67519181585678,9.76373401534527,32.33772378516624,8.697196308434329,2.3582101278772383,1512,50,315,19,20,495,198,391,0.14400000000000002,0.7140000000000001,0.141,-0.5003,0,2,0,0,0,0,44.0,1,0,1,6,12,25,7,2,24,0,34,8,3,4,2,52,52,16,1,2,10,0,2,2,2,0,2,0,0,2,15,18,1,4,9,1,1,4,12,14,0,3,16,3,32,11,56,33,13,49,0,2,1,3,11,26,5,5,21,205,47,12,0.2713301648256992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838023227011826,0.0,0.0,0.18113197767455472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061504605463094636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885440454881185,0.08051379067678581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954538284647012,0.07551645138696755,0.11026690005480456,0.0,0.07696066195191356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922130620824499,0.09291027353657418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221168609228915,0.10007388886580706,0.09934781512600983,0.11665700648539284,0.09324316195591302,0.07789875779346317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255498747926837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254616542219928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181122267664671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526197721046473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683983616150849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975267485384016,0.08361345507511042,0.04725293746062007,0.0,0.0,0.15171924605554624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555840539937402,0.0,0.0,0.26720555705372595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000622088237436,0.0,0.09941064179424933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388283986755564,0.08837214207855047,0.0,0.0,0.08003955253613064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689173442543161,0.0,0.08557972081566739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046221537140236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913220396461805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697555166958862,0.0,0.0,0.08487499309315864,0.0,0.08678287032175695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12257356117716818,0.20635881695543645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15794335615564276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201344086092557,0.0,0.08654210793300796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294437643479308,0.05794035046442974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3661341499063518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283883835811366,0.0748157053974588,0.1016621578507828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894508236356555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07222820670708854,0.07561472238493949,0.0,0.0,0.10353604118407954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800217216442535,0.0,0.0790515078062593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008656836121234,0.0,0.0,0.0718019476660296,0.1054765340595006,0.0,0.08572975681710764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879226009442527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509646122662065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097681308969628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26337545535970075,0.0918496510200408,0.18433907889458045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theundercovermango,2020/04/04,"How do I set boundaries being quarantined with my parents? I've had to move back in with my parents because of the pandemic (school cancelled classes and shut down campus). My parents, particularly my mom, won't stop making comments about my progressive weight gain in the past year. They repeatedly make comments about me waking up early to walk with them in the mornings, that I'm lazy, and that I should go running. My mom will point out how ""fat"" my arms have gotten or any cellulite she sees on my legs. This is really starting to take a toll on my mental health and I'm trying not let it get to me as I went through a slump in February and want to make progress during this time. (They also don't believe me when I say I get depressed, typical Latino parents) I've tried several times to tell them to stop making comments about my weight because if anything, it makes me not want to work out, but they keep doing so. How can I make them understand that this is a serious issue to me without seriously damaging our relationship?",5.7152331002331,6.637191106060609,6.142929292929293,78.1484965034965,67.23232323232324,8.92059052059052,32.907536907536915,9.057496981413335,2.8551704739704733,821,35,150,14,13,265,121,198,0.036000000000000004,0.887,0.078,0.7293,4,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,0,6,4,10,4,0,0,6,0,13,7,4,9,0,31,33,14,0,4,6,6,2,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,8,9,3,3,1,0,0,5,5,4,0,0,3,4,29,0,29,25,0,29,0,2,1,0,20,12,0,2,11,101,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08905180160208287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572628006122742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09163696151155999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562632178101116,0.0,0.13576385202639693,0.0,0.0,0.1254607111954838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591124281951788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635841410301236,0.0,0.06328649983096106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836681707863972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162273183443067,0.0,0.0989788279443824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386962826340435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4459882150042248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222122214835717,0.0,0.0,0.26083891677373805,0.0,0.1183544013470378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4945931313332744,0.0,0.10630243773488238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526794376923083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133786442623108,0.0,0.0,0.11955527248763627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855520683467287,0.0,0.11269878477809513,0.08873676173683709,0.0,0.0,0.12580121754847934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881874702699845,0.0,0.0,0.18619814243048013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372627537924826,0.0,0.0973305425557297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986581245318418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512075905687955,0.0,0.0,0.11592610720417493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313619696571608,0.0,0.0,0.2712045833389141,0.0,0.10322864768342717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734375103874716,0.0,0.08106890266042563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170997431766782
mentalhealth,Lvarela688,2020/04/04,"Is there a certain age when you finally find your group friends? Im almost 30 years old and I’m at a point where I’m exhausted of constantly being alone. This has not been the first time I’ve felt this way. When I was younger I always leaned on the hope that when I get older I wouldn’t be lonely. 

I worked so hard on myself and poured so much into friendships throughout my life. Why is it that I’m constantly alone. Am I that broken and hopeless? I’m so tired.",1.143195876288658,3.2741734742268105,2.4259896907216496,94.94620103092787,82.29896907216495,5.5294845360824745,20.009278350515466,6.742157984588678,0.15127298969072145,365,10,81,4,10,117,68,97,0.201,0.691,0.10800000000000001,-0.8117,0,4,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,2,0,2,8,6,0,0,4,0,9,3,0,0,1,11,16,9,0,2,1,0,2,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,3,2,10,3,5,10,1,19,0,2,0,0,4,6,0,2,12,48,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19928767244597206,0.4122450343936004,0.0,0.0,0.16559883053334198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43013528133347456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191088388106831,0.2180143746093416,0.1818987493109536,0.16928451869640698,0.0,0.0,0.15376073097242518,0.0,0.10397863528748892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828094163969138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19766967410414266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21497347681710235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405722239649831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630105114760328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088358010046432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18813623779634134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604893426468155,0.22874179207102585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15797114048324626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17958269379361866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448873968911735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816099847237342
mentalhealth,Lola_Birdie,2020/04/04,"autism diagnosis people always say to me that self diagnosing is never okay no matter how obvious and how sure you are, but i'm terrified to ask my therapist for a diagnosis because she won't like it and never uses mental illness words to describe me other than 'anxious'. If i do ask her, what if she says i'm not? It's obvious and makes a lot of sense that i am autistic, so am i allowed to say i am to my friends even though it's just an (informed, i've been reading psychology textbooks and comparing my behavior and my habits to autistic people i know in real life and online) self diagnosis?",9.230840336134458,6.376615949579833,10.25166386554622,63.95363025210085,61.77310924369748,13.217478991596641,42.2873949579832,11.602472056035307,4.900158319327732,474,22,87,11,5,167,78,119,0.092,0.823,0.085,-0.1935,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,0,3,1,8,3,0,5,5,27,15,13,0,2,5,0,0,1,1,1,3,3,0,2,7,6,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,3,15,4,10,13,1,3,0,0,0,0,13,1,0,3,3,63,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775536832863348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20060749878146952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3320144839322259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824715098428014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18023335388767456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728561503878457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719283745023986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09758974584755654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12542540706251729,0.08675343735632929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509666306326928,0.0,0.0,0.11853168308106367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895231162374156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739112442269864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462141979786388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17762154334680927,0.20211750676551413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42364069823887385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37049575364715454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16736091230003147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061765077138127,0.0,0.0,0.17446505178365446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533664808256275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Broncos1413,2020/04/04,"Anyone care to help a guy out? Diagnosed with manic-depression, bipolar 1 and insomnia. The meds I take for my manic and bipolar issues counteract any meds I take for sleep. Hence it being 3 a.m. and I’m wide the fuck awake.",1.917045454545452,4.4900420681818245,3.6647272727272733,84.46209090909093,82.86363636363637,7.156363636363636,22.43636363636364,8.238735603445708,1.6715872727272731,177,6,33,4,5,59,34,44,0.081,0.7829999999999999,0.136,0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,3,0,1,6,1,0,0,5,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,5,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,2,1,0,0,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365771653498208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17855792666482026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603627756875145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199464625042048,0.25919123348628703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360818603845312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528526045759765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711665254346763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266535880097866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.567308375952811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25555053949943873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3840070787732728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kitanalotus,2020/04/04,"How to deal with thoughts of inadequacy and comparisons? I find that my self-esteem can be great for a while and then it'll completely crash. These last two days I've found myself feeling like I'll never be pretty enough, especially since the standards have gone up with IG and surgery which I haven't had. It's like I appreciate other people's individual beauty, but struggle with seeing it in myself. That just because I didn't complete x well enough means I'm not intelligent and so on... It's like those shitty thoughts were built into me when I was younger and still follow me.",6.335178571428571,7.024365732142857,6.453571428571429,77.29142857142857,65.78571428571428,8.9,30.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.2931464285714287,470,16,88,7,7,150,83,112,0.165,0.706,0.129,-0.7312,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,2,0,10,0,0,1,1,21,19,11,0,0,3,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,0,6,0,0,2,4,1,1,1,8,2,10,5,10,8,2,13,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,10,60,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306397597333788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3889344903398787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961617649385685,0.19121681334691776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38329097728168027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378184694245227,0.1325035381889441,0.0,0.0,0.16952099598097015,0.0,0.0,0.20336401145177355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20448709094826495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15118706386764313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27184147945708764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20203689454390536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14304992812515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12858516788397575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886949839263308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779974120084372,0.0,0.1934911108869225,0.0,0.0,0.15342702321879648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812075470823416,0.0,0.0,0.19389897672841386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944932225977493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811823447529764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16676450244394245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StevenUniverseFan14,2020/04/04,"I need help with my late night depression It’s getting worse and now I am having anxiety attacks. I need help so if someone could please help me, please do. The only person who helped me irl is gone so I need someone else for now.",1.4085106382978732,3.6952945319148967,2.637702127659576,92.89400000000002,82.40425531914894,5.4621276595744686,22.16595744680852,6.742157984588678,0.53199914893617,181,6,38,2,5,58,35,47,0.2,0.578,0.222,0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,10,4,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,7,0,2,8,0,5,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430710863342797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2127641797111781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14932160699200422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16108151361449666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562326297764504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771111766722616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5014268051094445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21096862035222885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4160226558342896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17550719347431246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422384281189309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633001320917045,0.0,0.4105873235754772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169257539863508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905910869937701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pautherebel,2020/04/04,"I feel like my voice is never heard, and I always have to comply/listen to everyone. 
Recently, I’ve been really worried about my close friends’ safety.
 With my close friends I felt like I could express myself the way I want to, but with this cv spreading to a big town like mine, my friends won’t listen to my concerns. 
They stop talking to me when I try to tell them it’s important to stay indoors, or if I tell them not to go outside even if they’re healthy. My best friend won’t talk to me anymore because I was trying to tell him not to go out to bars but he thinks I’m panicking.

Whenever I try to apologize to my friends about me being really concerned for them, they leave me on read. 
Or if not, I just get told “don’t tell me what’s best for my safety.”

It really hurts me because when I’m trying to help and people aren’t willing to listen, it keeps me up at night and it gives me a lot of panic attacks. I feel lonelier and I worry so much...
And being inside in quarantine for weeks really is messing with my head...",5.941959026888603,4.755161821596244,6.808766538625694,80.73583866837389,66.93427230046946,9.998975672215108,32.039692701664535,9.095868883498916,2.4869661971830985,800,27,170,12,11,268,115,213,0.121,0.67,0.20800000000000002,0.9644,1,1,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,5,2,7,14,1,1,3,0,13,2,1,0,1,32,29,15,0,5,11,0,3,3,5,3,0,4,0,0,6,11,1,2,4,2,0,2,8,4,0,0,5,7,37,10,31,18,4,20,0,1,0,0,26,9,0,6,10,115,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208740441626508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975621174328576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259046041890526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13492841962163993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322854461392889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836204407491176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309736347626096,0.0,0.0,0.10575118952836124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11191748997158538,0.07906361353472059,0.10626182333638512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4275219387357741,0.0,0.057821197212153314,0.10616601517925232,0.12579412381311145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358070359068123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418065333270127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847593763837695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836975477051924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718494881582832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16220525103151692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408879911227973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135615463082302,0.0,0.08535654510092254,0.0,0.0,0.10385753728240872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984894923119172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672555887057887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107012698099648,0.0,0.28359552745579586,0.0,0.10927457758403747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796090244931745,0.0,0.0925261795376316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17790683065236187,0.38692644888738015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091371351487498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575118952836124,0.0,0.3005542480671027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06527681227246081,0.08784574294955767,0.08877385777722079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2247841963231696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ganjagangbanger,2020/04/04,Thoughts So I've been having alot of thoughts latley of like killing myself and maybe more specific shooting myself or hanging my self or overdose because I just feel so hopeless and helpless I just dont understand how I feel and I'm constantly irritated and there's just nothing that makes me happy I don't use drugs I smoke weed and drink especially when I get angry I drink alot when I'm angry but idk any other way to not freak out and end up in jail for something not really sure what is going on been to doctors and psychologists and they've mentioned rapid cycling mood disorder I have the psych eval somewhere but that was like 5 or 6 years ago idk I just really don't understand how I feel and I fell like everyone is happier then me.,3.4523752598752613,5.5567332500000015,4.477027027027027,83.24177754677757,74.60810810810811,7.797089397089397,28.276507276507274,8.617729084823388,2.2474266112266115,603,25,115,12,13,196,94,148,0.153,0.727,0.12,-0.2589,0,0,5,1,0,2,1.0,0,0,0,0,11,10,1,0,3,0,10,4,0,4,1,35,23,21,1,0,11,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,10,2,0,7,2,0,3,5,4,0,0,5,3,16,5,9,18,3,15,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,5,10,71,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14766052024874934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327811852759224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10154383464481648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800106331056228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19091175168477464,0.17049868774814084,0.0,0.0,0.1952270832955728,0.3263642205115181,0.19317651435976185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14753783970654127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15917152714117067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25267911224496964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870296429045933,0.0,0.09466958661182984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17732438655641575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842928454856947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24414342412743534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111914864965198,0.0,0.1673490544578601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15983518951879833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134270706403672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17377621121140086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12823916529754725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699691539288646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644871705779813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468252052444484,0.0,0.1438691035044104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13222112319012608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727017045865048
mentalhealth,voicesinclouds,2020/04/04,"Bipolar gf with psychotic tendencies Hi,
I have a significant other who ha Bipolar-I
And she has had psychotic tendencies.
And so as a way of keeping check on any negative thoughts we made up a rule/promise that if one of us harms ourselves, the other one can too. And I don't have any such tendencies. But I thought that this would come in her way of her thoughts about harm. 
Once she lost her pills, had withdrawals, and thought about harming herself. Had to stay on the phone with her (she's a 5hr drive) until it passed.
I know this ""promise"" is kind of fucked up but I don't know what else to do.
Also a recent red flag is that she's been telling me she can make decisions on her own, and so wants me to just  ""be there for her and support her"", but insists that this promise not be a thing.

The promise is kinda me blackmailing her into not harming myself. And I know this is messed up. But I don't know what else to do short of calling 911 on her if god forbid something goes wrong.
She says that if she has psychosis then she can't do anything, and she might end up breaking the promise. Since she won't be in her right mind. And that's true.
But I don't know what to do when shit goes that bad.

Any advice will be much appreciated.
Thanks.",2.3853650680028617,4.160514358267721,3.174931997136724,92.86360773085184,76.6771653543307,6.192984967788117,25.324982104509665,6.980632752743323,0.8493763779527557,973,35,214,10,22,307,127,254,0.138,0.748,0.114,-0.7673,0,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,2,0,0,1,10,20,2,0,10,1,31,4,1,2,1,45,49,24,0,5,11,0,0,0,1,4,2,1,0,0,19,14,0,2,10,0,1,3,9,11,0,2,10,2,35,9,28,31,2,25,0,1,1,1,30,13,2,5,5,156,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13034613777389728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667109481158436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27212717951180154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976774005453126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113742012647951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13620503133116527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490276902485112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22285870260715554,0.0,0.11814301741727774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12331593451420254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185622272660204,0.0,0.13890406457495952,0.36653539141823066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560979553643974,0.0,0.0,0.12621584933152746,0.08903815964731739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14150459625604686,0.13468481419163422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805622589312288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420548779910333,0.1807756087787323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13170549557779124,0.0,0.0,0.11391343414270765,0.0,0.1060762465708488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692183992468104,0.1103407175213506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026893302047825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217487232053422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15136819928766498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658782131570428,0.12280662343097115,0.0,0.0,0.08861769104695294,0.0,0.0,0.42358370520258576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604504826335036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867625846891188,0.2117558789128796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947556826875184,0.14583987665119574,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aku_478,2020/04/04,"Coping with lonliness... Does anyone have any ideas on how I can deal with being so lonely, yesterday I decided my friends weren't supportive enough so I've begun to cut them out, the girl I'm interested in is probably talking to a bunch of other guys cause I'm so boring

Right now I'm writing this to get it off my chest before I start the day.
I only recently got out of my last abusive relationship with a narcissist and I think that's messed me up, because now I just feel unlovable. I get that I'm not a great looking guy and I'm.not the most exciting, I just wish that stuff didn't matter so much.

Last night I wrote that today would be a good day but I've managed to wake up miserable. 
I know I just need to get used to it, this is my solitary life and I don't think much will change, I just wish I could do something about the feeling of lonliness. But I guess that's life, some people get what they want in life and some don't, I just need to accept that I'm the latter there.",2.3713478012564257,3.906868893203885,3.799960022844093,89.40160765276987,76.0873786407767,7.177155910908053,23.768132495716728,7.928766900206844,1.0907793260993721,776,24,170,12,17,256,117,206,0.10800000000000001,0.7859999999999999,0.105,0.0976,0,2,1,1,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,0,14,13,1,1,9,0,14,5,2,3,0,42,40,11,0,7,8,0,2,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,13,9,0,0,8,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,4,3,23,7,22,31,7,21,0,2,1,0,11,9,0,4,12,108,36,1,0.0,0.15555041489213878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892778185608365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917970274944259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002968413695281,0.0,0.11171326053278448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13486512889206653,0.13888137025876784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481982219669524,0.0,0.0,0.16933501126354836,0.13534833745309974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148877661556172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13565176520782518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276256250451296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014299161424532,0.0,0.27436249011350244,0.0,0.0,0.11011503300888284,0.1050000390915818,0.1447413922762906,0.14462444563450644,0.25998417351550945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482039824862517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215041194312494,0.2140284358967532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781899279202191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024573810365723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19301811659721335,0.19469127383412205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12320141193768101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998476178049846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101599587191513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14154666840391725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962739729365216,0.14095019478723292,0.0,0.11211606561989966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10106905976760924,0.0,0.0,0.09292369558598887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15028910160046505,0.0,0.14897985555278168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055213386686062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824334293658658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444215545736576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338747399877006,0.0,0.0,0.07743487520688876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30194090692006725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326059229101286,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cocododo2,2020/04/04,"Is there a way to hide coronavirus related posts from my feed? I feel like I need this for my mental health. I’d love to scroll through reddit like the good old days and pretend nothing is wrong for a bit. 

Side note: I suffer from extreme anxiety and have been cooped up in my New York apartment without outdoor access for weeks.",4.251562499999999,5.9583297812500025,4.152000000000001,88.09300000000002,71.5,6.995000000000001,28.425,7.554174236665415,1.5929724999999997,262,10,51,3,5,80,51,64,0.115,0.6809999999999999,0.204,0.8102,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,3,0,4,3,0,0,0,5,7,2,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,6,4,11,6,1,10,0,1,0,1,1,4,0,0,6,28,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949580973182765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27822811779202017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435594006705684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885885561007865,0.1820635320371866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21375449330466706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.270891610798219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490118154862537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23001035825894697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568269417375348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889666353997997,0.0,0.2461338809788872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24453362319451974,0.0,0.2674202086469365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2440740312355914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20228655788422495,0.20442377190855268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24566447206813236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786363882928398,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,posthumanus,2020/04/04,I need someone to talk too Recently I’ve been having issues with keeping a positive mindset and being able to maintain one state of conciseness I’ve also been feeling more depressed and disassociated from reality and I just need someone to talk to.,5.651666666666667,8.355203444444445,7.153055555555554,63.81625000000002,70.1111111111111,8.944444444444445,37.91666666666667,9.516144504307137,4.507333333333333,205,12,29,5,4,70,32,45,0.079,0.81,0.11199999999999999,0.1298,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,0,9,8,4,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,2,0,7,5,1,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,22,2,0,0.27110778839998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168048004349179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335047408907689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13708024369262975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28296609507486603,0.0,0.2409730589803361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4020459798085435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837096537445378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676862343576886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4594174986665534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4358123418707997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pleasedownloadfb,2020/04/04,"I just really want to someone to talk to I'm new to reddit I only really downloaded it to vent to someone cause I'm to scared to talk to a real person about it,lately I've just been depressed I've stopped eating I've been sleeping through the day and staying up all night and now to top it all off my girlfriend wants to take a break I'm just scared and have nowhere else to turn.",1.888606271777004,3.4719245853658585,3.3688153310104525,91.77426829268295,77.53658536585365,6.149128919860628,23.90940766550523,6.868970318607317,0.7014334494773521,304,10,67,3,7,100,47,82,0.139,0.8190000000000001,0.043,-0.8228,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,5,3,0,2,3,0,3,2,1,1,2,13,10,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,16,8,2,10,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,5,36,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20346659433514844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12773508736669792,0.0,0.17059249045193345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20266922462368708,0.16545730670996744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19129173413455675,0.0,0.18586992731311028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063682446421345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17294210613964886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254405339889303,0.25377012325642845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3965938316737012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19820733860955386,0.0,0.3356384755005352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21111018937820727,0.0,0.16559062264739768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891970339793953,0.31839316189390593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21543708165325828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23364691036957436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,penelelle,2020/04/04,"Fuck I’m going crazy At this point I’m just waiting to die becuase I’m too much of a pussy to kill myself, life seems pointless, we are born in a world for nothing, waiting to die that’s are lives worth, and you never know when it’s going to happen. The point to life is to live it, but her I am sitting in a room, under quarantine and I feel empty, I feel like I haven’t accomplished anything, and I may never have the chance to. I mean fuck lets really think about it, there are 7 billion people on this earth, currently a virus is circulating, the u.s government predicts 200,000 victims, if they get there shit together, 3million if this keeps continuing, and I could be one of them. You could be one of them. If not then it’s something else. But eventually we’ll die becuase death is enviable, the only thing I have to show for this  experience we call life is our lives, and I’m basically going to die when I do knowing my life was unfulfilled.

That, or I’m just having a manic episode, becuase I’m cooped up in an apartment for 30 days, which I’m using as an excuse as to why I can’t accomplish anything in reality, I fucking can’t becuase I’m dirt poor, and to mentally unstable to get out of bed let alone make something out myself.

But disregard everything said, becuase nothing makes sense, I don’t make sense, and all my head is, our thoughts all jumbled together.",5.279735938170892,5.646840434306568,6.156466294547018,79.6310626878489,68.01459854014598,9.366766852726492,32.54100472305711,9.325443323948027,2.796512924001717,1085,45,215,20,17,359,148,274,0.218,0.735,0.047,-0.9944,1,2,2,0,0,1,35.0,5,2,3,2,8,7,6,0,11,0,26,9,2,4,4,44,59,19,6,5,10,0,2,1,0,2,4,1,2,0,12,11,0,4,8,1,2,3,7,6,0,3,3,3,27,1,32,48,3,28,0,0,0,3,14,15,4,6,10,138,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073482052909618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17058716118264425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583633051948514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550919768929556,0.0,0.0,0.06684447003341068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4302815850588102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865847137868456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315225705995724,0.10138776083879894,0.0,0.0,0.10481521883362664,0.07404624564509997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874630814150705,0.1083037412749846,0.0,0.1767168646134286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165570012430782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637288510631432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212722136191516,0.11467130043377413,0.0,0.11392460455857625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119744730724918,0.2928389612473513,0.05063724143905272,0.0,0.2745695963362161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20755779726744875,0.0,0.0,0.11290320037672345,0.0,0.0,0.10445293795735563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07619330234494258,0.0,0.15987965698492665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989063545998812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14046931228295448,0.07882907434759723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185656366305039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19596197205711574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06639964691413268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859310796233377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943573659004896,0.0,0.0,0.10639331722167304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15958679038739929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06885921281949675,0.06641353735018399,0.0,0.0822850385708022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951870674964743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352631697998967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kyotos-revene,2020/04/04,Emotions are gone. Hello. Over the past 4 years I lose my emotions more and more. I rarely feel happy or sad or pretty much anything. I’m at the point now where I move through everyday with fake feelings trying to believe I have them. Idk what’s going on. So if you have an idea lemme hear it (19/M),0.6230875576036894,2.860719741935487,1.9481566820276512,96.8708064516129,85.4516129032258,4.188018433179724,20.147465437788018,5.288315135182226,-0.3074728110599079,232,7,51,1,7,74,53,62,0.209,0.741,0.049,-0.8542,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,1,1,3,4,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,9,5,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,3,7,1,6,8,3,12,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,3,4,31,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19045823199452308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26075750270324005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5206854402284697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340495161156668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315346413510883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463758470197577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608535792295151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612714739228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589260099619896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459877505484881,0.17013755963620955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22093895316617976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21878886123321956,0.0,0.0,0.2354611853001346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15713490434889396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490419880758786
mentalhealth,Neuro_Neuro,2020/04/04,"Help. I'm stuck in my head. What can I do to stop the bad self talk, and stop focusing so much on my anxiety so that I can actually get shit done that's going to progress me towards my goals. I get so stuck in my own head that by the time I notice I haven't done any work, its 10 pm at night. God I'm really beginning to hate myself. I cannot trust myself and am not good for myself. Please help. I feel like I'm losing it.",0.6206578947368406,1.8229153157894729,3.0770394736842133,94.15240131578949,80.05263157894737,6.855263157894738,18.190789473684205,7.645422480735847,0.09113157894736856,325,6,83,5,8,113,61,95,0.265,0.596,0.139,-0.9148,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,4,3,7,2,0,2,0,8,3,3,0,0,6,19,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,4,1,15,3,10,15,2,11,0,1,0,0,4,5,1,0,6,49,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.18111152823750987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12620927836856774,0.0,0.14197777040701307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15496200264585275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3798511702080441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093841154937262,0.13258733392779326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19392886411663685,0.0,0.10547650654013407,0.15566620105207804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18323419093119567,0.3809429395259825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487975091117113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067113101238326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20763055802364608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364318573218402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741660083691193,0.0,0.0,0.21129831500605445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037248554275562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11889532117924828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936134753974792,0.0,0.1905080555436519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3103273153087428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14917223808257496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082204913618628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511356552350545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_compactdisk,2020/04/04,"F, 18. I just hate the way I am I hate my personality. I’m so mean and I hate it. I’m always irritable and angry to anyone that’s around me. It’s gotten better in the past but with quarantine it’s coming back. For example, if I was in class and someone was bouncing their leg in my sight, I just had to close my eyes. I couldn’t take it. If I heard chewing or breathing, I had to cover my ears with my hands. Even people simply talking or whispering behind me— I’m covering my ears. 

When I was prescribed an SSRI, I improved so much. My misophonia was so much better and I was happier, but I feel like crap right now. I’m so unmotivated. I don’t want to do anything anymore. I used to go to therapy but stopped because it’s expensive and insurance doesn’t cover mental health. 

I cry knowing how I would treat my parents. I wouldn’t cuss them out or anything, but my tone was always harsh. Everything made me irritable. I feel like I’m the worst person on the planet. Am I that rude or is it my brain? I try to explain my irritability and I just get told how rude I am. I know it’s rude. I just can’t control it. I try so hard and I hate it",-0.3411130365235913,1.8632569628099205,2.667739269528127,89.84037723273796,90.94214876033058,5.601919488136496,20.616368968275125,7.1029339738359605,0.6561478005865107,883,31,195,15,31,312,120,242,0.235,0.664,0.10099999999999999,-0.9882,1,1,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,2,3,16,14,8,0,5,0,19,10,8,5,0,43,44,25,0,6,14,1,4,2,0,2,1,4,0,2,11,13,1,2,6,0,1,2,5,9,0,0,12,10,42,5,17,29,3,16,0,0,2,0,9,8,1,6,7,129,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122629142633943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264948964020595,0.08918562258955352,0.0,0.2099248506456696,0.11354615628587975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807774349299683,0.0,0.07775303188148283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256144527719063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238749941641654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987265755099243,0.0,0.0,0.14305768461778512,0.0,0.0,0.14010720956169165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08424528574127796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463332594931586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898578654160106,0.18224287162241204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06663938409519511,0.0,0.07248935803718097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425935831848688,0.5037151611012293,0.0,0.1355792247296531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14019581210581328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462855085349014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069048386563495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389388703826625,0.0,0.0,0.1285399630791803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18752721487447727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14162869915270734,0.0,0.12176049378258065,0.08842680944040245,0.22274272334734047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089266328935232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10807233380280756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663714890658163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959014002875338,0.10251951008124123,0.0,0.0,0.14586404537650474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187907683141165,0.0,0.1731955661943334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11016187275836542,0.0,0.0,0.07523203903187503,0.10124290896406613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906075524836526,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Diarmud92,2020/04/04,"Moving Forward after a Diagnosis So these past few years have been rough for me & I noticed a larger pattern that has presented itself in different ways throughout my life & I decided to get assessed by a psychologist. 

I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder, generalized anxiety disorder, & ""other specified personality disorder with negativistic, avoidant, & borderline features."" 

I'm feeling a lot of emotions right now & I'm just wondering how you reacted when you were diagnosed? I don't think I was expecting such a broad diagnosis in the ""other specified personality disorder"" but when I researched the 3 disorders I had features of, it made more sense.

I've worked in social services for years & have always heard of the stigma surrounding mental illness, but I don't think I understood it until the psychologist diagnosed me. I just remember all those times I tried to talk to friends & was told ""you just complain too much"" or ""you just need to try harder to be happy"" & even now I feel like I can't talk to them about these issues because they are mental illnesses & not a physical ailment. 

Anyway, it just feels like a lot. I'm reaching out to establish with a regular therapist & psychiatrist but I needed to get this off my chest & I wanted to hear from others. It has me thinking about how I want to proceed with my career & what I want to do with my life in general.",8.514903474903473,8.434904563706567,9.074420849420848,62.95402509652509,61.277992277992276,13.114285714285714,40.50772200772201,12.416235457179464,5.526423938223939,1138,57,183,37,14,383,146,259,0.086,0.8270000000000001,0.087,0.34,1,1,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,4,2,1,18,7,0,1,12,0,16,8,1,4,1,42,38,10,0,6,10,0,4,2,1,0,7,2,0,2,14,6,0,1,10,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,10,6,30,4,33,27,7,24,0,1,0,0,16,10,0,4,15,132,44,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509513945089059,0.7961610538765973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04684365958159159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03732753237092599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052740548645970976,0.18645293544602584,0.0,0.06397624733169002,0.3508959759068633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887973931662691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040444321649074855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288488833194182,0.08749082222575269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047309051872660435,0.0,0.06398422561279878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518447725055541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690148990117879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639121374817722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650243262185416,0.05983144520224375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411750777052456,0.0,0.05794086525428613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341845756212665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06508179727640817,0.04501386000179696,0.09080811582291863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06971504278403996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058454553644892986,0.0,0.10693391646527134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936591443543731,0.0522932973415958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062420108017814564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984347552399528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109711614423415,0.0,0.11770836466587653,0.0,0.0,0.03570589848379015,0.0,0.0,0.058511482776616476,0.0,0.08314740849558422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835177629755706,0.04860450930638127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640540177657388,0.044578907318335546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788650689475301
mentalhealth,LittleWandererx3,2020/04/04,"Overall struggling This is my first post on Reddit, so bear with me please. 

I recently had a child, and it’s been quite taxing mentally. I feel like I’ve lost myself. My current mental state seems to be taking its toll on my relationship, and it’s just kind of sucky. My libido has peaked(I’m thinking it’s my own way of dealing with the depression), while my partners has dropped, I feel like every time I pursue, I get shot down. It hurts, and I’ve explained this several times. I’m already not feeling the best about my postpartum body, I just feel like I’m at a loss. I’m to the point where I’m done trying to pursue because I’m tired of feeling rejected. I love my partner, I truly do, but I can’t stand feeling the way that I feel. 

I just wanted to vent a little bit since I don’t have anyone to really talk to about this. Much love, stay safe.",2.39793103448276,4.154205000000001,3.717908045977012,89.06789655172415,76.58620689655173,6.479080459770112,24.243678160919533,7.3011,0.9818188505747124,666,22,139,8,15,218,105,174,0.11599999999999999,0.759,0.125,0.7611,1,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,5,7,14,0,1,7,0,11,4,1,0,0,22,32,6,0,1,5,0,7,3,2,0,1,0,0,3,9,5,0,1,10,0,1,0,3,6,0,1,4,7,22,8,17,27,4,20,0,5,0,2,9,7,0,1,9,81,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122763954542736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894856584272592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801460650951539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430571357212792,0.0,0.1397195563197019,0.14215544641916586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194038439600828,0.11022783689060962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309666078415093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782754518659084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4529690095166494,0.27428395217677515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885858732298448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686357049262834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13700380811725574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327008601834014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875717342348749,0.12826824382847976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970383109834855,0.0,0.2310114841009608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25794478743042026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407904440663907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048214322328234,0.1209812050651829,0.0,0.12256818478314115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13612106374775987,0.0,0.0,0.08198641006973605,0.0,0.12636349251873913,0.13740119184961475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650697034310754,0.0,0.1445794641058701,0.0,0.10586527442802192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640822910246106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337910881148567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622402916130238,0.10286440341937443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820035611697656,0.0,0.0,0.14925077782271245,0.1470926493357377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688911299587232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548513260455901,0.20316701519111688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MustHaveBeenTheWind-,2020/04/04,IPS programs Hello i am looking to see if anyone has expirence with these. They look like theyd be good for someone struggling with mental health. But im having trouble finding info on how to be apart of it what its like if it costs anything etc. Or if there are other types of programs you know about that help people with mental illness find work id be interested in learning.,3.2049034749034746,5.5554628108108135,3.8409652509652514,86.35364864864866,76.29729729729729,4.769111969111969,26.787644787644787,5.288315135182226,0.8710563706563703,304,12,54,1,7,96,58,74,0.098,0.743,0.159,0.6249,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,2,1,3,6,0,1,0,0,8,2,0,1,0,14,12,6,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,5,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,4,4,11,8,1,3,0,0,3,0,5,3,0,4,2,37,11,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332571025599753,0.0,0.18044879819789245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445552210589616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40083598825533456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.183921703205202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23308444033967504,0.0,0.0,0.14697879603848296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368600838518232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051058142502677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21425831342489648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3682800316920141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4419654326145503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15202117751106595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17473781045615538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857952757205916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22923912023073725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159638488825825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UthinkUnoWhereImGoin,2020/04/04,"My kid almost died yesterday And my husband wasn't there to help at all. 

I want to kill myself, I always have. But I am living to keep others alive. This is only sustainable for so long. 😫",0.10230769230769,2.417704871794875,2.580205128205129,90.45646153846157,90.02564102564102,5.171282051282052,15.492307692307696,6.742157984588678,-0.09622461538461513,146,3,30,2,5,50,34,39,0.23800000000000002,0.672,0.09,-0.8108,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,6,6,3,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,6,0,5,5,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602852554806762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2993803692608293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734130333337937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2411647013783257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31980457798736306,0.39806266052918654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31770781240112306,0.31840949350038306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27364223605347354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122179063051908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iammeunfiltered,2020/04/04,"Hello The last five years I spent isolation myself. My anxiety and paranoia boomed 5 years ago. I am having regularly conversations with a therapist. Truth is I stay at home all day, cause then I don't triger my anxiety. I'm asking myself everyday. How will I ever be acceptable on paper to someoone? Will I ever worthy of someones love an affection? I know it is a process. I just feel very lonely, missing companionship.",2.7592307692307685,5.7345438974358975,4.698153846153846,75.27184615384617,84.38461538461539,8.248205128205129,27.03076923076923,8.841846274778883,3.0983907692307686,336,15,55,10,10,114,62,78,0.161,0.652,0.187,0.6235,0,3,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,8,1,0,3,4,13,15,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,1,2,12,3,5,11,1,12,0,2,0,1,5,2,0,0,9,38,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21294080953308386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.367535757174274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245735612074724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467724286885371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492222613359605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4345860440492088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12146260585407564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24096055591883195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201879931715055,0.19581161330784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21680820736216505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20353788795460526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560428866664217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.278914293293677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982069125225216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093880056461524
mentalhealth,throwemawaypls,2020/04/04,I know you’re not supposed to ask. But what gave you PTSD? I know it’s often thought of as a “soliders” illness. But I’m super curious how often it happens outside the norm.,0.7325000000000017,2.9611616944444457,2.9977777777777814,89.60000000000002,84.83333333333334,4.711111111111111,28.44444444444445,5.985473137389443,1.2367444444444442,135,7,27,1,4,46,29,36,0.075,0.752,0.17300000000000001,0.5423,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,9,7,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,3,1,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,17,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4240296418118663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40109321441586093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4985438524988876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5302027080703833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3600863947788802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WrappedinFlannel,2020/04/04,"Terrified I'm developing schizophrenia Hi there, over the last few months, I fear that I am developing schizophrenia. I've always dealt with severe anxiety and hypochondria, but I had a horrible panic attack in January that made me feel like nothing was real. I stabilized for awhile, but to into periods of derealization. I don't experience any hallucinations and I take online Schizophrenia tests frequently, but I have concerning violent thoughts that scare me and for the first time, I had a fear about eating the dinner my partner had cooked me because I was afraid he poisoned me. The stress and isolation of the current COVID-19 pandemic certainly isn't helping and I'm often left ruminating on the fear that things will just continue to get worse. I cannot afford my normal therapy sessions and I'm currently on no medication. 

Can someone help me or give me some kind of insight? I'm so excited that I'm developing schizophrenia and will lose all the people I love if my condition worsens.",6.873274602492479,8.788939430167597,7.381117318435756,66.66816931671683,65.31284916201118,11.09428448646326,37.23291792006876,11.051253699011982,4.871181865062312,814,42,126,25,13,267,115,179,0.307,0.602,0.09,-0.9936,3,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,5,16,3,7,9,0,13,6,0,1,2,25,25,13,0,2,6,0,1,1,1,2,2,0,0,1,6,9,3,0,3,1,0,0,4,11,0,1,7,1,20,5,14,16,3,15,0,1,0,1,7,6,0,4,10,83,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272872050401019,0.0,0.0,0.10402804180148953,0.0,0.11702522687477315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17403080552104466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325195732785302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15653130838933602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496386102521386,0.0,0.5164172013693435,0.07734860475158845,0.1092851563251122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13012020176728273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992296701010691,0.14674727155221245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20507143383228024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929960978455693,0.0,0.12469479785173553,0.0,0.0,0.16620745926856878,0.0,0.0,0.07473571142368286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113956001137987,0.0,0.0,0.13806563938125674,0.1447483600185687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410591660717593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210294616485667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988272650460605,0.14678335050701313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794828503398797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605339574595303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17411869915030734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315436146334616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17281786860823334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961496698241295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17523200212962736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11501793654716973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17493990145427668,0.0,0.1016295933958788,0.0,0.0,0.1214448244483424,0.08920077782469422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558942884073954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rheanneek,2020/04/04,"How to cope with COVID uncertainty. I haven’t been suicidal in years but with the pandemic I have no hope towards the future, I feel lost and I just wanna die again. One of my best coping mechanisms is having something to look forward to and focusing on that but I feel like there’s nothing to look forward to when no one knows what happening or when this will end. I try to be positive and look at only facts but things constantly change and everyone in my household has been nothing but negative. My mental health is deteriorating I was doing good before this all started but now I’m getting worse and worse as everyday goes by. I’m at a loss. I don’t know what to do anymore. I need help.",3.2214720194647204,5.255769291970808,4.62454379562044,82.24124391727493,75.05839416058393,8.070316301703164,27.47506082725061,8.841846274778883,2.2575892944038927,551,22,107,12,12,183,90,137,0.18,0.643,0.177,0.3812,0,0,1,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,3,7,6,0,0,3,0,14,1,0,1,2,24,29,15,2,3,7,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,4,0,0,2,5,2,0,2,4,5,12,4,19,23,2,18,0,2,3,0,1,8,0,2,13,79,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16059046684103614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377900045500622,0.0,0.16993492961991166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17129984881480131,0.0,0.0,0.1749881699299846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805716625377812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434213975044602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15473049429836322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637527541880868,0.11568240563347218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08460143536409323,0.0,0.0,0.13581870967656046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319364591716766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17212339479750158,0.0,0.0,0.1085378728006282,0.0,0.0,0.1608324451549633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798434210081054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911053225289627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4079397740916316,0.0,0.1767650837324965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16318676299006032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006860859453793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107512797635189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21945512322739824,0.12315461607732894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466117396298206,0.0,0.0,0.11461447259293292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17712449658127866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757870732793524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993944270107622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3300398135284875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427723347666183
mentalhealth,sororitynoize,2020/04/04,"unsafe and scared I had spent the last five months in a residential facility after overdosing in October. I got kicked out today, after two weeks of shit consistently hitting the fan. Last night was just the cherry on top of my depression pie.

My therapist told me that staff weren’t allowed to lay their hands on me. I believed him. When I went to go stand on the porch for a breather last night, I was restrained by a male staff (I’m a 17 y.o girl. weak and small.), he picked me up and turned me around and slammed me on a coffee table and then onto the ground. He had me pinned on the ground and wouldn’t let me go, even though I was in obvious physical pain and was having a panic attack. He only let me go after a female staff told him to get off of me.

I left that situation with a massive bruise on my leg, my hands, and my face. There are probably more, but I’m too scared to check. I’m at my dads house now, but I’m still freaked out and scared that something is going to happen to me. Feeling that powerless and weak was terrifying. I never want to feel like that again, and I don’t want that staff member to put any more girls through that again. What do I have to do to fix this? What do I have to do to fix myself? only rhetorical, of course. maybe.",2.88480694980695,4.185250945945949,3.994090733590735,89.4922944015444,74.28957528957528,7.342162162162162,22.602509652509646,7.908726449838941,0.8357612355212359,981,25,218,14,20,319,139,259,0.158,0.812,0.031,-0.9856,3,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,1,11,12,2,4,14,0,21,8,5,2,2,28,42,16,0,3,3,1,4,1,0,1,3,0,1,3,10,15,0,1,2,0,2,6,4,11,0,2,13,4,31,1,39,25,2,46,0,1,0,0,12,21,1,0,19,144,41,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08531865098523897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168802652304084,0.0,0.14273145297941586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14135302331228555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806047576960982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828666510262409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687499444791975,0.08963027611499291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655488617295346,0.0,0.2852124143316929,0.0,0.10034364451441613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094587764826584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14476662334789586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3068055041703617,0.0,0.0,0.1363151316020956,0.2565873581475073,0.0,0.061294531442381124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12604372102562852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014279292104936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676424291254816,0.0,0.0,0.23547569677314426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19083943117194369,0.13350070900893746,0.1472029502891673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13526955512973074,0.0,0.0,0.12612424180169382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3768288805481852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12878522491301536,0.0,0.1410248565740623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658699075227624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019433687822764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567137418241596,0.0,0.0,0.12326605063758515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189235691515351,0.23976916543925736,0.0,0.0,0.1364669305207597,0.12255841473617425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14800180377077926,0.0,0.10063827124308188,0.0,0.0,0.11630478819584797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_King4200,2020/04/04,Hello Hi I dont really know what to say but I dont have much of anyone to talk to and I honestly just want someone to hear me so here I go. I wake up every single morning with intense anxiety over what seems to be nothing I'm always stressed and since the age of about 10 I havent felt normal something always hurts sometimes physically but mostly mentally. I try and avoid large crowds they dont scare me but when I'm in a large crowd of people my emotions constantly change one minute I am happy and the next I'm as angry as I have ever been. I also have a major problem i lie and i do it a lot and i have tryed to stop my constant lieing but i can't i feel like if i dont lie people will leave me and that's another thing I'm in constant worry that my friends and family are going to leave me. I'm a very sarcastic person and so are my friends but sometimes when they say something even if I know they are being sarcastic it makes me paranoid. I also am really good at faking my emotions I can make my self cry within seconds and I have trick people all the time with my emotions I also really like drama I have the constant need to have to make my friends fight each other and if I'm honest I dont know what this is I honestly just wanna know what wrong with me I have been like this for years and slowly it feels like I have been drowning and I need help I'm sorry if this freaks anyone out or makes anyone sad I just dont really have anywhere else to go,1.392046931805666,3.2114526709265183,3.435284785722157,89.65699680511183,79.79872204472844,6.106378759502039,21.016745620799824,7.0983637204850245,0.5301819764239286,1158,32,248,14,29,393,146,313,0.20199999999999999,0.662,0.136,-0.9509,0,1,2,0,1,0,5.0,0,0,3,0,14,23,2,3,8,0,32,1,1,4,2,55,58,32,1,10,13,0,3,4,3,1,0,3,0,2,14,18,0,2,8,1,0,3,8,11,0,2,4,6,45,12,28,51,7,22,0,2,0,0,18,7,0,8,16,171,59,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827471051477525,0.12366212951059764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791949584749068,0.05684620365902442,0.0,0.0,0.1558758021780534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860909947215595,0.0,0.0,0.3212066455785013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08162497888202365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5225377701548135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207565845768745,0.25076296712173624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049080412714336524,0.06721677084517508,0.06260856170791784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005193904281168,0.0,0.07514575542169749,0.10617277008167632,0.07134832088467102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17223291401802332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669460060192728,0.0623268878111356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910334295590102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837516761024545,0.0,0.04980777565487012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07954935225396964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16335319557479874,0.0,0.0,0.15736506429967487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14521455196114064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317487899172589,0.0,0.0,0.19840741504129925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488602338635794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05462568629344526,0.11019840661617501,0.0,0.0,0.07902849517385073,0.0,0.07280707094862628,0.0713015172839998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05035372106518225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15454957262565652,0.06488377773788126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07110370493279412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19041706662909574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11818704453669432,0.0743963011695729,0.0,0.0,0.06764814899111797,0.07752052326237235,0.0,0.0,0.0614691965330647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296179898223553,0.11441344160164907,0.14698705917143912,0.08318287400075106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062125675436468526,0.08512074145601789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597267825942396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04936761686561925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04333019228573735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090190559999547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06131273105239169,0.04382939048203991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546442581875416,0.0,0.0,0.0812452577943009,0.0,0.04785257824664151
mentalhealth,gillbill0,2020/04/04,"Struggling with quarantine I have divorced parents and I’m only 19 working my way through college and waiting to go off to bootcamp for army rotc in college. I am struggling with this quarantine because I’m so secluded to either my dads house for a long period of time and my moms a long period of time. 

My boyfriend of almost four years and I decided social distancing between us should be taken more seriously due to the severity of the virus now. And I’m just having the hardest time keeping a good head on trying not to shut down my body and ignoring everything during this quarantine :/ I’ve always had a hard time being social when I’m alone and I just tend to push people away when I get overwhelmed and worried and I feel like I’m starting to do that with my boyfriend.

Any support could really help and would be very much appreciated. I love my family and boyfriend very much. I’m whenever I can I’ve been helping my older loved ones social distance themselves from grocery stores and public places. And on top of everything college is just a lot on my back right now. I feel like I’m just a kid still learning how the world works and just feel overwhelmed :(",5.257649999999998,6.633789817777778,5.680152777777781,79.38556250000002,68.6,8.647222222222224,32.28472222222222,9.017664075816787,2.845538888888889,939,41,169,17,16,301,128,225,0.09,0.774,0.136,0.8943,1,4,0,0,1,0,12.0,1,0,0,3,14,12,0,4,10,0,14,4,2,1,0,38,34,18,0,3,7,3,4,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,17,0,3,5,0,1,2,1,6,0,2,3,4,19,6,27,25,5,33,0,2,0,2,14,12,0,2,20,108,22,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11861745385698445,0.12268560253823718,0.0,0.0,0.09856561320863727,0.0,0.0,0.08055474018639316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129413774471794,0.0910860285043566,0.0,0.07221021432617475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13157888904187434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457817943529732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129228104786924,0.0,0.11167060369305848,0.0,0.1796860726678124,0.16925123690779162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061888830462755576,0.0,0.06732177451562844,0.09935601045854624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611409681779968,0.0,0.12157093327854293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15879829886189326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13668333473145014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528991735189956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157440957673362,0.0,0.0,0.20966122164792947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070780297645264,0.21382391740581896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13873526571105754,0.0,0.0,0.17415887265614866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026944730401121,0.09009179480600717,0.0,0.0,0.13153234636744668,0.0,0.0,0.08212308520141401,0.0,0.12376222691870105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07588651033248756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116152793963387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338225565359353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3622556133718693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384438907395599,0.0,0.09459981706426616,0.0,0.0,0.24767370060445226,0.0,0.0,0.13442346319072365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2762926363952586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042444553351538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14248904094597512,0.0,0.0,0.1954786629533932,0.0,0.09402555731131176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724760383245143,0.12029871126593825,0.0,0.08414836857278707,0.0,0.0,0.0762823467000107
mentalhealth,Concernedfriend4321,2020/04/04,"Recently begun talking to myself, would like to know why. Hey all. Since coronavirus is a thing bringing the world to a halt, and a bit before that even, I have begun talking to myself. As a preface, I've had a recent breakup with someone who was amazing, however her anxiety and depression issues (ie not good enough for me, that sort of thing) made things rather difficult, and we ultimately stopped being a thing.

Onto the meat, after the breakup, I did lose a confidant who I could talk to about everything on my mind, as she would provide some amazing emotional validation which I really needed. With her gone, and other life shifts, (starting uni, covid), I've been finding myself in very bad habits, mental health wise. Not working on assignments early (not new, but something I was working on changing with uni), procrastination, finding very little motivation to get out of bed, and to do anything once actually out of bed. So a couple times, I've found myself laying in bed, and physically talking to myself.

One ""person"" in this conversation is the scared one, the one who doesn't want to do the work, who wants to hide away, watch youtube, and just avoid everything. The other is confident, giving the obvious pointers, telling what I should be doing, telling me to get up, to watch my steps, go one at a time, and Do. But he never gets ""control"", if that makes any sense. As an fyi, I haven't felt any kind of suicidal in 5 years, and I don't feel it now.

Idk, I guess I'm rambling at this point. I haven't told anyone about this specifically, but I do have support in friends and family. Any help from you guys would be nice, cheers.",8.502445887445887,7.308544006493513,8.202415584415586,72.82743290043292,61.85714285714285,11.330216450216453,36.76709956709957,10.355215969177356,3.6552837229437225,1286,50,237,24,15,412,184,308,0.096,0.7759999999999999,0.128,0.9261,1,1,1,2,0,0,62.0,1,1,0,6,7,16,0,2,18,0,27,2,0,4,3,53,48,18,1,10,9,0,2,1,1,4,2,0,3,2,19,16,0,4,7,0,0,4,8,6,0,4,10,4,25,10,42,30,4,36,0,2,2,0,24,18,0,4,15,161,44,6,0.0,0.0,0.09471213995681378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980031467850521,0.0,0.07424717019620619,0.0,0.0,0.06786344246312632,0.0,0.07986838354504837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09118681053071656,0.0,0.08103726485778974,0.0,0.0,0.08258705794144815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595943794706726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267181995983844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088559643032003,0.07749089667497676,0.10739003340889212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359373555642366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10917434235052034,0.0,0.10028424682663893,0.0,0.0641042237043543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17445439957784,0.0,0.09149526100077936,0.0,0.04907416268097197,0.0,0.09318847316019016,0.0,0.17741388564708918,0.0,0.0,0.10641631516985796,0.07498481667710942,0.0,0.1521224344354859,0.09310445224280728,0.055158861210006405,0.08140552489433646,0.0,0.0,0.1069175442056099,0.09610017602021244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316542789615286,0.0,0.0,0.0650542368374061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10130069664918437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010683384747436,0.053339149025173366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855314993135776,0.047416401010241485,0.09727508002833954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085802470014942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183623402346196,0.06478528100628081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780908778068108,0.0,0.09799835900973312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196540247840268,0.07485516305327942,0.09373677935652999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033609098100817,0.2630691977507537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474509428234278,0.0,0.0,0.0917487918551173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06217622041691252,0.0,0.19166113888419206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716945863329596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028528913187984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223478621252206,0.0747180438141955,0.0,0.0,0.06869636240937912,0.0,0.0,0.08114272019559003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616293329675552,0.11013739912313593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120380470186295,0.16966152031367884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579173711292041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318765209267426,0.0,0.0,0.092740662427985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16016185724368798,0.11449166365569202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757746719421428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21197261796296893,0.0,0.0,0.20683626730950108,0.0,0.0,0.06250054168466243
mentalhealth,nullminded,2020/04/04,"Family Help - Possibly Mental Health I no longer know where to turn and I need help, or guidance. 

​

TL;DR: My mom is either a drug addict, or developed some sort of mental health issue and I don't know what to do. 

​

Story:

​

My mother has macular degeneration and has for years. She messed her foot up and got surgery which resulted in a more messed up foot. She had a weight problem and was a waitress on her feet all day so she's got bulging discs. About 4 years ago she was up to 10 vicodin a day. She claims to have cold turkeyed that against my wishes as i've been around drug addicts and was one myself for quite a few years. 

​

Fast forward to around October of last year. My mother lost control of the finances after gambling it away on a video poker game. My step dad took over and it became world war 3. She started losing it completely claiming my step dad was cheating on her, hacking her iphon/ipad. I work in infosec so i've tried pleaing with her that this is impossible. 

​

The more you try to reason with her the more she refuses to talk to you and thinks you're just not believing her. She started going to a therapist around September of last year and her and my step dad started seeing this therapist around November. If the session didn't cater to my mother she would lose her mind about how my step dad lied to the therapist to get his way. 

​

Side Note: My whole life my mothers been a manipulator. She's like 5th degree black belt

​

So my step father has a hard time controlling his anger which this whole situation is going to come to boiling point which it did. A physical altercation I wasn't a part of got escalated and my step father went to jail for domestic abuse. I wasn't there to know but I can have my own thoughts and believe who I believe. I don't believe there was domestic abuse. 

​

My mom and step father go at it verbally every single day. She believes something new every couple days. It's gotten to a point where she believe I flew into town, sent her pictures of me being at the airport, walk by her house to taunt her, and change her channels while she's watching tv. I live a good 18 hour drive from her and up until recently haven't had money to travel. 

​

So the drug problem. She was up to 10 vicodin a day I believe I mentioned that above. That was about 4 years ago. She got changed to non-habit forming pain meds which I can't recall right now. Regardless, she admitted to taking my little brother ADD meds, taking my step fathers diabetes and muscle relaxer meds, so god knows what else she's taken and when. 

​

The domestic abuse charges have made it so my step father is to have no contact with her except through my little brother. He decided it was in the best interest of the family to move back in against mine and his lawyers wishes. My little brother is senior year highschool and called me today to tell me they're back to yelling at each other every day. 

​

Mental health laws make it so we cannot force her to seek help. I believe she's got a drug issue that's underlying but also a mental health issue. The mental health laws don't help with getting her the help she needs, nobody in my family is willing to risk their safety to get her the help but they rely on me to vent to. I have no fucking clue what to do anymore. She needs help before she hurts herself.",3.70981742760516,5.7720262906626525,4.271832593532024,85.18403191714228,73.74397590361446,6.88856478545762,27.01056859015007,7.731754440074428,1.6219050200803204,2723,102,512,37,57,862,295,664,0.08800000000000001,0.836,0.076,-0.5662,0,0,5,0,4,0,98.0,1,2,2,8,25,19,4,1,30,0,42,22,3,8,1,74,83,38,1,10,10,18,2,1,0,2,16,1,0,0,26,32,2,3,9,7,3,22,13,14,0,1,30,7,91,5,83,50,15,93,0,4,3,1,84,37,1,5,36,336,117,6,0.0,0.11670520624196422,0.0,0.07158563138834452,0.0,0.0,0.058208945901661764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02625653776927045,0.0,0.3913199526254008,0.4388525684298758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032561512928726125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691332191484795,0.0,0.0,0.03084768374585568,0.05049309977877504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027938464236779925,0.2959323757902909,0.034456207250074235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03352616335126455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06946591975964883,0.02828272176285122,0.03442477521179551,0.0,0.07365000137918283,0.0,0.036329089358142164,0.0,0.12704741049518406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15230342213201298,0.0,0.027427757972068385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298965424625726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285608935666716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030353578894489926,0.05146166118547167,0.0,0.05597925061151232,0.027538762157494,0.1312977449154188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02941191841677169,0.0,0.0,0.17449971518492768,0.0,0.0,0.15405087192172573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032333890718866415,0.03788487308106051,0.03514840494110764,0.0,0.0,0.10280736332201046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07217663128363769,0.05352655336919955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023190918473372936,0.016040545054900136,0.09872187285428374,0.02899214001114045,0.0,0.0,0.07346345597690833,0.0358410973734853,0.0,0.0,0.03106737791439545,0.021916282061372774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941018203775282,0.0,0.16543970502799527,0.0,0.03315196977228148,0.07690722418585022,0.0,0.03489628231233007,0.0,0.07303575912053144,0.0,0.031710315429568176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02224849012774065,0.0,0.034936626275249086,0.0,0.0,0.03555493881310307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207559401932637,0.03701427359065572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628334924918554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034921936370745185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033757791726090385,0.03241862591892334,0.0,0.0,0.028039202103234528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026163649630323933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036905666990268766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02527644702424246,0.0,0.0,0.0697180979275961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04937265888451496,0.026389921237191145,0.028697488661007933,0.0,0.0,0.11436492876915715,0.0,0.021038060286185455,0.0,0.026065734053222156,0.019145185994385708,0.0,0.03112184438277233,0.0,0.036478670431856174,0.04458290277506413,0.035712875129487016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0260613066846356,0.0,0.03998174802490968,0.0,0.03043651939667465,0.0,0.07331374262381446,0.07551265793671423,0.0,0.0,0.023902814612646626,0.0,0.0,0.023323620759047876,0.0,0.4388525684298758,0.1480036260538556
mentalhealth,kevinh117,2020/04/04,I feel emotionally attached to stupid things Tomorrow we’re changing the carpet in my bedroom that’s been there for over 15 years and for some reason I feel so anxious and sad about it. I also feel attached to things like stuffed animals and I’m 16 years old. I know this sounds really stupid but I’m being serious.,4.141774193548386,5.996383177419357,4.852451612903226,82.35867741935486,72.06451612903227,8.185806451612903,28.529032258064518,8.841846274778883,2.3190864516129035,255,10,48,5,5,82,46,62,0.165,0.8059999999999999,0.028999999999999998,-0.7261,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,10,8,6,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,5,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,4,5,1,7,6,1,6,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,5,28,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22065635697480035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117156291938793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918910505787872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3103774092775097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4185464591986305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516406376357843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348025496281096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28953586702136314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676400696520184,0.2836958706151657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666233463615951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35537207349038025
mentalhealth,BunBunMcBun,2020/04/04,"Sudden relationship? As we are in quarentine, I decided that to pass the time, I would read some webcomics. Eventually I came to this web comic called Heartstopper, that was about these two boys who meet each other in high school and fall in love. At first as I read I thought it was really sweet (and I still do!) how much they cared for each other and just how overall cute they were. But as I approached the end of the latest update, I felt increasingly aware of my own loneliness, almost as if I hadn't noticed it before and It all just snuck up on me. Even now its gotten to the point where it's almost incapacitating how much I just want to find my soulmate, and how alone I feel right now. After seeing someone who was almost like an ideal partner in one of the characters, my mind just keeps going to the fact that I'm never going to find someone like him. And I know very few people actually do find someone who is 100% right for them and the rest of their life, because relationships take time and work to really blossom but I just don't know how to deal with these feelings. I have never felt anything this extreme before and its really taking a toll on me mentally.",7.218594202898551,6.4561260913043474,7.481521739130436,75.56170289855073,64.17391304347825,10.449275362318842,30.90579710144928,9.725611199111238,2.6391884057971016,931,27,180,16,12,304,135,230,0.015,0.904,0.081,0.8863,1,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,0,4,3,16,7,0,0,9,0,12,2,0,5,4,51,31,21,0,4,8,0,4,2,1,1,1,0,0,2,18,14,0,1,11,3,0,7,4,0,0,3,10,6,25,7,29,20,10,33,0,0,1,1,17,13,0,5,15,134,43,4,0.0,0.0,0.1082602531287231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3332675107153025,0.1148991260814573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912931692126425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06762725493927725,0.0,0.18880147364370625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11328090536210357,0.1268844180492794,0.1131094871639954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437301822764158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825883702269476,0.0,0.0,0.07327402261228724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218796822339036,0.0,0.21303726634413586,0.0,0.3041881248401002,0.09436447566165873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260981386253177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721291956738375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860749133258448,0.0,0.0,0.12193811221600474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835934620128042,0.10839817531654207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012658672636504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180020434818873,0.0,0.11201654991039968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631055466454313,0.0,0.17112566359148906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630454444749398,0.0,0.0,0.07517499327924805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07691098650157151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048730124250027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22193761748735485,0.0,0.21321068336091287,0.0,0.0,0.2382134793960947,0.0,0.1894822361035595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122759753170985,0.08840385005128154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28199422298176835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859585870935636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16682432284221405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807300500030066,0.12937859784591638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837107499204664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153611783386097,0.06543457097551374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08076475830691787,0.0,0.0,0.07880773138951018,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ittybittythrowaway27,2020/04/04,"4 years later and I can't swallow pills. Massive TW for suicide and overdosing.
-
-
When I was 13, I was depressed and anxious to the point of hiding knives under my pillows. I'd had enough. I overdosed.
It didn't work, so I tried again a few months later. And again. And again. Four times I attempted, and many more times I took two, three, four times the usual dosage of sleep meds. 

Four years later. 17th birthday was a week ago exactly. The gel pills for my usual meds ran out so they had to give me dry chalky pills (think benadryl/advil/no plastic casing). I've been sitting here trying not to puke for the past 10 mins.

I think, eventually, it might go away. Or I can keep distracting myself with gel capsules like I usually do.

I survived PTSD from the mental hospital, stopped cutting, survived anorexia and bulimia, and the one thing that still takes me back to all those attempts are these pills.

Sigh. :(",2.5071402494675965,5.148881502890172,2.8304167934286566,90.98737754791605,80.79190751445086,5.491816245816853,24.134164891998786,6.8360192770164,0.9019086705202316,712,26,137,8,19,218,117,173,0.11699999999999999,0.8079999999999999,0.07400000000000001,-0.7596,0,0,0,0,0,1,35.0,0,0,1,5,9,5,1,1,8,0,12,6,1,0,2,19,20,12,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,1,0,6,10,1,2,2,0,0,3,3,3,1,6,9,0,17,1,14,10,4,31,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,2,24,86,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12928045879720768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476036242828815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13702370471482933,0.112143777977379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561381706660854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15069415132239575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990528780976444,0.08288557815387361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296313969183897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125121377590757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786126936095328,0.0,0.0,0.32399598404965885,0.0,0.14697480353227518,0.15471570420051708,0.0,0.0,0.11640998599102673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988265623678763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922304179178802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786817731565573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704819225793704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14594769269972666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646990274747045,0.12193074927314465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952787841849786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965530974244812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968911882561362,0.18689979994458025,0.0,0.0,0.25512557124399665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203623606961307,0.1980347878145325,0.0,0.14246680091864755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4818742886737607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698594980074525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617498021311317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187835405547631
mentalhealth,That-Sky,2020/04/04,"I have so much anxiety about having sent nudes when I was younger and idk how to help it go away I was bullied when I was younger and eventually I found that my only source of validation was talking to random men online I’d meet through Omegle and maybe sometimes sext with on kik and Snapchat. I never used my real name. I’d try my hardest to keep from revealing anything too telling about myself, and at the time I wasn’t thinking about the consequences of my actions but now I feel horrible. Thinking about it makes my whole body feel numb and it takes me a while to find ways to distract myself and make myself forget about it, but I know I never fully will. 

I didn’t always send pictures (sometimes would just straight up sext through story/describing sex acts), only did so and video chatted without showing my face a couple of times. I oftentimes avoided showing my face like the plague but when I first started I would do it sometimes. I look different now because I used to be a lot chubbier but there’s still an obvious resemblance. I’m moving into a stage in my life where I want to grow and improve and be better but I feel like this drags me down and holds me back so much.

The fact that I can’t take back my actions kills me. I have deleted all emails, kik and Snapchat accounts that I would do this with because I’d never use my personal since I was trying to avoid being identified as much as possible, but with the way the internet and social media work now a days I’m so scared that I’ll be found by one of these men that took advantage of my vulnerability and it will destroy my life. My hope is that none of them kept the pictures, but you never truly know. I feel so stupid and scared and I don’t know how to make myself feel better. I’ve tried talking to my friends about this but none of them ever did things like this so they can’t relate/don’t know how to make me feel better. 

I feel so so so dumb and scared. Has anyone here done anything similar and felt the same way? How did you deal with it?",4.439581280788178,5.402932490147784,4.829532019704434,86.26331280788179,70.1576354679803,7.573399014778326,28.29310344827586,7.7094869923839395,1.562528078817734,1605,56,327,18,28,508,195,406,0.159,0.747,0.094,-0.9858,1,2,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,2,3,6,34,20,4,6,14,0,30,8,4,11,8,86,66,45,1,5,10,0,8,3,1,5,3,0,0,3,19,23,0,5,18,4,1,9,12,11,0,2,17,9,53,9,42,40,9,42,0,0,1,2,21,9,1,3,23,228,72,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06955837628755393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395053425461969,0.0,0.0,0.058452105183347834,0.0,0.13758438966121578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854097651134552,0.12855997216460668,0.0,0.10191840940050746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22180099226865105,0.0,0.09285605372433252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924971280652394,0.0,0.05391235511520971,0.0861835668663698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733978585385868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554749522551665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561715875000016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958797270356635,0.059720833872590626,0.08026504753269316,0.0,0.07640501813966162,0.07110651816331094,0.0,0.18331689114982974,0.0645858835402577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04750940182547954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603248164589656,0.0,0.0,0.08302946058067562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430376022666596,0.09248633233861382,0.0,0.1837681930682341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180923273267426,0.1225220100250167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019939158751179,0.0,0.0,0.07107013314776478,0.0,0.0,0.223203298993826,0.0,0.08398318570833417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884907249459914,0.1843575259719128,0.0,0.2578968413919964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056646656356185675,0.12715669815339206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729926008020553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424166873011253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951502862395381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510818436477852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06915128373515675,0.0,0.0,0.08521535874065207,0.0,0.0,0.2480350583896031,0.0,0.059169515360913326,0.0,0.06675968888015164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570722890247266,0.13438222468193906,0.0730663864887956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553731419551941,0.10712958628561878,0.0,0.0,0.09749072999313316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09287797492861832,0.17026811875953302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21659971147930712,0.0,0.0,0.04930695027927039,0.19906329042756066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333169039230436,0.0,0.08058333791844703,0.0,0.06085871524467841,0.0,0.0,0.1781521068441986,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thinggobadifeelsick,2020/04/04,"I think I might have uncovered some form of trauma while experimenting sexually... So, long story short, my gf wanted to try some butt stuff on me (a straight male), and while I initially was really put off by that idea, I eventually got curious too and decided to try something with my fingers before taking any permanent decision.

Now fast forward to today. I decided to try some stuff in the shower by myself, and managed to actually climax just from using my fingers. And while it felt good, for some reason it also felt wrong... I cleaned up, thinking about what I had just done, and started feeling increasingly more sick with myself. I don't know, it just didn't feel right... It didn't take long until a strange nausea took over me, my whole body started feeling really heavy, and my vision became a blur. All while the sensation of disgust with myself intensified. I had to take a moment to sit down afterwards, waiting for it all to pass.

This was really uncomfortable to me, and now I'm afraid I might have awakened something and start experiencing this sometimes in moments of sexual pleasure... I am still curious, but won't be doing this again or anything else too out there until I sort this out. Idk for sure what it is, but it sounds like some kind of trauma? I'd like some feedback regarding this...

Looking back at what might've caused this, I remember mainly three things. One of which was an unpleasant experience I've had in elementary school that I don't think it's worth describing now, since I don't think that's still affecting me. The other two are the more relevant, I think...

When I was about 13\~16 years old I've had some annual sex ed classes, that when I look back at it, I'm pretty sure scarred me to some degree. Because at the end most of those classes we would be described and shown some photos of the really really bad cases of sexually transmitted infections. By the end of those classes, I always felt disgusted and nauseated a bit in the same way I did today. I was already sensitive to some stuff about our genital parts (mostly maybe thinking about how it is on the inside, and I had already briefly had similar feelings on some science classes, tho much less severe), and gore, and all that nasty stuff. Maybe I already had something going by then maybe it intensified it all. I don't know. But shock therapy on sex ed classes should be a big no, that's for sure.

Now the other thing is, since I was always very awkward and silent about girls (that elementary school experience certainly didn't help), I eventually had a friend or two poking fun at me about my sexuality. I knew for sure I wasn't gay, due to the porn I liked. Possibly bi in denial, but I don't think so, because I never really saw boys that way. But anyway, thing is, this eventually spiraled into intrusive obsessive thoughts about my sexuality. And at points, I experienced this kind of nausea because of it too. It was horrible... I haven't had that in a long time now, and I thought I was free of it, but after this experience... I don't know anymore. Gay sex was something I found a bit icky, and a big no, and I guess that's what made it feel so wrong now. I thought I was done for with this, but yet here I am now... Disgusted at myself for making me feel good in a way that I used to think I shouldn't.

I've read some time ago about a condition like this last one (can't remember the name) often being fueled by porn, but thankfully I got rid of porn a while ago, so at least I got that...

I think I had something more to add, but honestly, I can't remember it now, so I'll leave it at this. I know this is a weird topic, but any help would be greatly appreciated! And thank you for listening :)",6.414120221174393,6.325826920723232,7.119365650123818,75.25483734183659,65.60639777468707,10.630767665117537,32.418365616201356,10.322093796472897,3.1760739577326227,2912,107,563,65,41,967,293,719,0.083,0.7979999999999999,0.11900000000000001,0.9789,1,0,5,0,0,0,115.0,2,1,0,0,42,34,3,3,27,0,59,15,4,8,10,123,112,49,0,5,15,0,11,4,2,7,2,2,2,3,59,28,0,1,35,1,2,6,18,13,0,5,41,18,70,22,82,59,32,91,0,0,3,10,12,33,1,22,54,405,129,10,0.0,0.0,0.053875625784226285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787817855936146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18277217568534854,0.04415029429450472,0.09187594912165983,0.0,0.0,0.0750874769602208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05475209226404884,0.0,0.0,0.04543197045094871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490400503922382,0.04609687161589065,0.10096394312668493,0.0,0.04697844891164423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054697591557167,0.06132430429619865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056714436024888085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11299512349645448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04611969776618853,0.0,0.09779685859654558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160184024439848,0.0,0.0,0.16749074989625432,0.0,0.15902673014265356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605333759330299,0.042654024337712405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03137631740333821,0.09261270198256703,0.1324660729261477,0.06086767202051594,0.06081849279317762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740103163359762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06232378489829628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498251406380712,0.1213648021822605,0.04500237435315023,0.0,0.058457931698016836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10788852529474696,0.0,0.0,0.1465736105055416,0.09272263204079052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052239708446421985,0.03685216654815142,0.0,0.16639336573892508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175702787519841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0405846704605085,0.0,0.04258027275610713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05793213444227956,0.0,0.07482154695184139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0597855294561643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052189968238443935,0.062239396773680976,0.0,0.05616699000549735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05549988772119986,0.0,0.0,0.05522353625468803,0.0,0.2122082418612795,0.056763631691905986,0.0,0.0,0.18762173106960855,0.047147839350309625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174809324620266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06236999900564018,0.0,0.0913382422827706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21251137233825215,0.05460271314841067,0.0,0.11723078526975166,0.0,0.08817931220208976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528025356288784,0.0,0.0,0.20813379354491407,0.0,0.12452998024770212,0.0,0.0,0.10165731542117776,0.0631358410309095,0.0,0.11003441409314878,0.3183789519640789,0.0,0.1314883751503876,0.0643851526353503,0.0,0.10466258731913193,0.0,0.061338781570950726,0.11244903813971496,0.0,0.1078615523864274,0.0,0.0,0.09536500195352117,0.0,0.04555287363215591,0.03256346034067095,0.13146604132696835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163842584876567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843720520765332,0.12072386592446048,0.0,0.035552525754878814
mentalhealth,harry_styles0,2020/04/04,"**trigger warning** I think, anyway.

​

I’ve been extremely self-destructive lately. I haven’t drunk water in like 3 days. I’ve eaten unhealthily. I’m self-harming. I’m crying all the time. I’m scared. And I don't know how to get better.",-0.5899999999999999,0.32177999999999685,1.7033333333333331,89.97500000000002,124.0,4.1000000000000005,18.583333333333336,5.985473137389443,0.5102583333333333,192,7,35,3,12,64,37,48,0.192,0.685,0.12300000000000001,-0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,2,1,6,10,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,3,2,2,8,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,13,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823684420910697,0.31666700157717703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304864207639201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28626543076779265,0.16807047125930802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615681915149186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14322323123079478,0.0,0.2939769493351413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12731980712359767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609138708950833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5437415430666642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698695516418832,0.0,0.0,0.1519625037558156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31666700157717703,0.0
mentalhealth,darlecamp,2020/04/04,"just need someone to talk to ran out of places to look, quarantine isn’t helping either and i doubt anyone gives a shit but if by some chance someone does pm me",2.3390909090909098,4.316138060606065,3.003030303030304,93.12454545454548,77.48484848484848,5.612121212121212,23.12121212121212,6.42735559955562,0.4472303030303033,128,4,27,1,3,40,30,33,0.11900000000000001,0.7609999999999999,0.12,0.0129,0,1,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,9,5,3,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,6,4,2,3,0,0,1,0,3,2,1,3,0,16,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263563534770481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832943126365224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31054693863505145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169863374783645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718478358685941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24003831061724354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3382241816155817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322995103940615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5485830267494981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601982448341555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DifficultDragonfly5,2020/04/04,"Questioning a type of mental illness Is there a specific mental illness that would cause a person to perform scientific experiments on themselves and other things? Ex: Someone who will do research about certain medications/herbal supplements, creating different combinations, etc and chart how they affect them just to be doing it. Or experiment on bugs with medications or substances. 

I'm not talking a child or teenager but like a 40 year old woman. Would it even be a mental illness or just a strange obsession?",10.062068965517241,10.951849689655175,9.641977011494252,56.92572413793107,57.85057471264368,12.477241379310346,44.98620689655172,11.979248473330829,6.17634896551724,421,24,56,12,5,136,66,87,0.158,0.7709999999999999,0.07200000000000001,-0.7724,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,1,6,3,0,1,7,0,8,4,0,3,1,18,9,8,0,2,8,1,0,1,0,3,4,0,0,3,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,7,4,1,4,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,5,3,44,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20381026928559506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072845700449635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22126716087675133,0.13104056854607055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38814428793254907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969276560534726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998659676366188,0.5998181273139281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20818621762876985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17323422224820165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22225211646357848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16810270083375933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15946547952092766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13180737944254636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2818736998172036,0.0,0.0,0.12776235392176244
mentalhealth,eusiris,2020/04/04,"Why do I feel worthless when my niece plays the piano? Sometimes I put on earphones so I won’t hear her playing.

My parents praise her all the time. When she‘s acknowledged, I feel like nothing to no one. She’s the one who people love.

Wish I could fix this, but I don’t know how.",-0.10189655172413836,2.218321482758622,1.0719827586206918,100.29004310344831,92.79310344827587,3.589655172413793,19.31896551724137,5.148860815047168,-0.5264206896551724,218,7,49,1,8,68,44,58,0.035,0.735,0.23,0.7842,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,1,1,9,10,5,0,2,1,1,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,3,12,5,2,8,1,5,1,1,0,1,9,1,0,0,4,32,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21545524685637776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728910436808293,0.1927826653380584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30414335677858434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830386553055458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183629075235045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435523985740572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25893073212807505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3657180480142824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996392436966316,0.0,0.0,0.18708173175169526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712762757427796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668910024243905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15735315094499291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434998899616414,0.0,0.3103170339023563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bunniiiiboo,2020/04/04,"Is there any option for Canadians to have online counseling? I've been struggling with my.mental health for a few months now , with the constantly anxiety attack's, ED , depression.. ect
and I know I need help before I spiral downward again . 

It's been 6 years since my last relapse and I really don't want to experience that again. And with COVID-19 having everyone staying at home , Mental health resources are basically non existent. 

I'm not even sure where I'm going with this anymore but. If anyone has any suggestions with online private counseling or something it would be greatly appreciated",5.620571428571427,8.596670152380955,6.036428571428576,70.48607142857145,71.28571428571429,9.533333333333337,32.404761904761905,9.888512548439397,4.059361904761905,486,23,72,14,10,156,82,105,0.06,0.872,0.068,0.5801,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,1,1,2,0,10,2,0,0,1,18,16,6,0,4,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,4,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,0,5,2,10,12,1,12,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,3,7,45,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622519616662409,0.0,0.14750876196876908,0.0,0.19122820719072406,0.1348260459519313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2193635453858776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16407783137583468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083727301722116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607782367580112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735750939207505,0.0,0.0,0.1842502584645929,0.0,0.1886175035117864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10958552773383616,0.0,0.0,0.21258759830076907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4099228160945428,0.0,0.0,0.1292449249089253,0.0,0.19341679057387332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059702587503198,0.15717615548601424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19431982942509693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539091604649554,0.0,0.0,0.1429755153781711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352709569077568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595048481019873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14844425869207598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055232367781024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20158004881637714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18173301945911327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373176591758374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697564338339754,0.0,0.0,0.12417143309191175
mentalhealth,McThrowAwayDot_jpg,2020/04/04,"Not looking for help just to vent. For the past 8 or 9 months i have been slipping into what i believe could be deppression. Ive had it like this before and i match a bunch of the symptoms i have found online. I would like to get a prescription for anti-deppressants if i can, but not sure as my government hasn't put anything in place for mental health that i has effected me (at least i havent noticed anything.) Also im poor as shit and the private sector of mental health is expensive as fuck so thats pretty much out of the picture.
If im honest, i can recall 2 times i nearly killed myself. Once via a train and second with a knife, mainly the train though. In the end im too pussy to do it and i only live at this point for the people i play videogames with, my dog, mother, father and half-brother.

If this gets much of a response i can post my story or some of it on here before i delete this throwaway.

Sorry for shitty spellings, grammar and punctuation if there is any.",3.768422174840083,4.633939776119405,4.803315565031983,86.19682835820898,71.63681592039802,7.13589196872779,25.30241648898365,7.1686216300943375,1.0485491115849328,769,22,158,7,14,252,125,201,0.15,0.772,0.078,-0.9494,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,3,0,12,0,17,5,1,1,1,26,22,19,1,6,10,2,0,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,10,10,0,0,2,1,2,1,4,3,0,1,3,1,20,5,27,16,6,16,0,0,1,1,3,10,2,7,6,114,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885006236347536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256197133496076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22401992538912088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316454363661306,0.1533535087680356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867569945041544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055632162015907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14924162682653122,0.0,0.12583490575390135,0.14222756197817052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2893649581251068,0.0,0.0,0.09123413192870003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4410784015360049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15058962227493314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329965393695949,0.0,0.12019087497349555,0.0,0.11430121182002928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2743411544650522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086446424166363,0.0,0.20011843550394184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549663291758973,0.0,0.14495662911936882,0.0,0.10352058872082848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12993591110638195,0.09436408882659172,0.0,0.14220982742781835,0.0,0.12867142537279774,0.0,0.13035928211250694,0.13847654840271478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683184531728965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397187386240717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15236812327014448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828553449829702,0.14147423265397474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373100153287684,0.0,0.07936898260395141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669125444009184,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UpvoteThx,2020/04/04,"How can I vent without feeling like I'm a burden? I'm not a person that opens up to my feelings and usually keep them shut in, but sometimes I just want to vent my problems out to someone but when I do I keep feeling like I'm a burden, even though the person I'm talking to is being supportive, so I always think that I should stop which is what I usually do, how can I stop feeling like this every time I talk about my problems and how I feel?",7.698473684210527,4.4922384000000015,8.329342105263162,77.64664473684212,65.0,10.76315789473684,37.43421052631579,8.07648339933343,2.9003157894736837,348,13,75,3,4,118,53,95,0.306,0.6509999999999999,0.043,-0.9712,0,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,1,0,9,8,0,0,4,0,8,0,0,3,0,26,22,10,0,4,5,0,5,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,4,0,4,6,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,5,14,4,9,20,0,11,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,9,53,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986600694674302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030853543236583,0.0,0.13149901173243592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3945783254030126,0.3344977258167052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277451348256728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287495058720163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725554594211157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2986833325703023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322409286717922,0.0,0.15436110087206262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26096957669201737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17711083851910756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25089261503055105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000058680154904,0.15334183714060853,0.0,0.09100795974730552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34378675295501193,0.0,0.092056443655603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504496924805487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dingodjango001,2020/04/04,"Worried about hallucinations My only diagnosis is depression. i tend to dissociate and most ofter hallucinate then. Recently i was at a cafe with friends and i hallucinated one of my absent friends walk in, hang his coat on a chair, and talk to the people around him, going on for several seconds, even when i looked directly at him. At the time i didn’t even know he’d never been there. I only realized when i looked back a minute later and asked about it. I’m not sure what i’m worried about. I have no idea what this means for me. I don’t need more help than i have.",3.4541228070175443,5.021718622807022,5.083333333333336,81.17833333333336,73.2982456140351,8.575438596491226,25.824561403508767,9.150863307647796,1.9791824561403504,449,15,93,10,9,152,78,114,0.11199999999999999,0.804,0.084,-0.2661,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,0,5,0,8,0,0,0,2,15,18,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,4,0,0,3,5,1,0,2,3,2,17,3,17,14,2,18,0,1,2,0,9,7,0,1,8,68,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741263466851473,0.18286051701201086,0.0,0.0,0.15040508392517266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16847084197462586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25838521199505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022416719821978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11116454754123292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13110721731794098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22080970370790293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749718608298844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32851112847775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21306681532559096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450356521081162,0.15085953823922418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325442897953289,0.2975267267936451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13560509470804294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193132375450796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22097343771998812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18435161375087905,0.0,0.0,0.15721666270633236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405650747784135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3972845904282268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Claire_1995,2020/04/04,"Someone please talk me out of going back to an abusive ex boyfriend Hi! I KNOW I shouldn’t go back but sometimes my emotions are overwhelming and I want to text this person and go back to them. I just need a little reassurance or someone to agree with me that I’m doing the right thing by cutting him off completely. My ex was so emotionally abusive sexually abusive controlling manipulating toxic and hurt me so much. He tells me he’s sorry and admitted to his behaviors but I know he hasn’t changed and isn’t truly sorry. 
The stupid part of me still feels like I have feelings for him and want to believe that he’ll treat me better and that we could work out. I left him a year and a half ago and haven’t seen him or gone back but I still talk myself out of going back to him constantly. I would love to come back to this post and have some support reading the comments the next time I feel like putting my emotions over logic. 
(I have BPD and split a lot so it’s hard for me to see one side)",4.072331932773111,4.909884818627454,4.842857142857143,86.29500000000002,70.91176470588233,7.789355742296919,27.806722689075627,7.957251820313856,1.5335487394957976,789,27,168,10,14,255,115,204,0.14400000000000002,0.6859999999999999,0.171,0.6468,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,1,3,12,11,2,1,9,0,12,1,0,2,0,40,33,19,0,6,6,2,4,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,7,17,0,1,7,1,0,7,4,4,0,2,3,6,30,7,22,26,4,30,0,2,2,1,23,9,0,4,15,114,37,2,0.0,0.350434062679893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739283384813852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.454851227187537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107557673101352,0.0,0.08719359345262137,0.0,0.0,0.12416887402335078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10429365262719527,0.08492533803892248,0.10336825770480328,0.1065392382702997,0.11057548343720046,0.07871496446397097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326966720185209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14954805547291716,0.14086341245122178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22412066378479875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831600914726594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554112140201526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836341816162716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711678820208713,0.0,0.0,0.0963308073769086,0.09881166428847464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381649107508155,0.0889800488899271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724739551663315,0.07310218802193948,0.0,0.0,0.10485008069874932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06680617801911032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676183229373827,0.0,0.0,0.08608375139740221,0.0,0.10822066288883182,0.0,0.0,0.09442061390841616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910876024869104,0.0,0.0,0.09861526643521737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419411458788834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07856233950247618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16706757960412685,0.0,0.09750663341048088,0.2207237030781406,0.0,0.0,0.1574659458021414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187716015849593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15848354346382126,0.08617077047391468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06549787644163367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05748779788679504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630020586649015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717736654937862,0.0,0.0,0.07003450353407878,0.0,0.0,0.06348781765066103
mentalhealth,fuck_my_life_707,2020/04/04,"Some Of My Miserable Life I feel miserable, so miserable I can't even put it into words. Since I can remember my self I was never truly happy. During all of my school years I was being bullied and I had no friend but from a point and after I didn't mind being alone. I was raised in a good family. My parents destroyed my dreams tho, even if they didn't intended to. From when I was a small I kid I was listening my parents talking about how everyone that has free time and have fun is just a loafer and a lazy person and they taught me that life Is working. When I was in high school and near graduation I told my parents that I wanted to be an artist. They told me that they wouldn't waste their money for me to do something so useless. After graduating I studied information technology. I was never happy with that but it wasn't terribly either. Growing older made me more and more numb. I have no will to live but I don't really wanna die either. I hate everyone, I never met a person which I liked and I had never a relationship. I feel entertained when bad things happen to people and I don't care about human lives, I don't feel pity even if something bad happens to an innocent child. I actually wish that everyone was unhappy, unfortunate and miserable. I care about nothing and yet I keep on living without a reason to. In the end there is no point in living.",2.4385738349242025,4.610617540145989,4.4112408759124095,82.20634475014039,77.97810218978103,7.5730488489612595,23.6771476698484,8.502166056373571,1.7211183604716451,1082,36,209,23,26,369,139,274,0.248,0.611,0.141,-0.9857,3,1,2,0,0,2,22.0,0,0,5,1,16,22,2,4,11,0,30,3,0,4,5,44,47,23,1,6,9,3,3,1,1,2,3,1,0,6,10,13,0,1,6,3,2,2,16,12,0,0,18,4,44,11,27,24,6,27,0,6,0,0,22,11,0,3,15,164,54,6,0.0,0.0,0.09521050515871222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104912486674827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16292734864418915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19895041993523002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012582779065121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641466502128699,0.0,0.0,0.19332459992399031,0.0,0.0,0.2796859617747497,0.0,0.0,0.09197669932792724,0.0,0.14799715710868672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753793788031436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183387210376614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17255487898483218,0.2077219985714416,0.0,0.09632639098505424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308401246641108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672129235690658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13782773862277084,0.047665901066660236,0.0,0.3446108527489526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923194665143714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851401594659327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30099617182296695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361736886180327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250070477004354,0.0,0.0,0.06764009565322814,0.1703820279010405,0.0,0.0,0.18446312846928373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808094605435376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625033850724201,0.10031426956736683,0.0,0.1047495505203987,0.11052344812001906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19748434015608027,0.0,0.0,0.10178279084450924,0.0,0.0,0.08070774177993455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15022240441962595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841998950432426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06481862622261432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0568916167367032,0.0,0.0,0.1864573078498332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057547053303252826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219627731391904,0.09405030358360113,0.0,0.07102933177405224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06282941288416907
mentalhealth,islacarr,2020/04/04,"Online Counseling? I’ve seen counseling apps on the rise lately and feel the strong urge to try as I can’t get to one in person (thanks corona) 
Has anyone tried them? Any you’d recommend over others? Pricing of them? I’m kind of desperate and appreciate the help 💕",1.3960164835164832,4.074919096153845,3.1917582417582437,85.41038461538463,88.80769230769229,6.817582417582417,18.96703296703297,7.957251820313856,1.2087879120879121,211,6,40,5,7,70,43,52,0.047,0.735,0.218,0.8614,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,2,1,0,3,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,8,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,4,3,8,6,0,5,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,1,21,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23749039833943925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24419181581113444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17658268516202674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18245981509409107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340835012630741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36367240147848257,0.0,0.0,0.393950006704656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23664930171218276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049367627516863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.321526801949726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4742125308029823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KillJoy_making_noise,2020/04/04,"Corona is making me breakdown again Before everything with corona happened i was actually doing the best i ever have with my mental health, then all of the schools in my area shut down. I had and now have no way of communicating effectively with my friends and they are my support system. It's not at the worst it ever been, but before all of this i had gone a long time with out impulsively chopping my hair off (its the thankfully safe but unhealthy coping mechanism i have used for a while whenever i break down) and i just did it again. My parents and family make fun of me when i do it and i'm stuck with them. I have two healthy coping mechanisms (happy/safe place and muscle tension and relaxation) but when my break downs build up they don't work. Any advice?",4.625277608297743,6.086773382550337,5.373264185478952,80.66488712629653,70.20805369127517,8.371201952410006,26.968273337400852,8.841846274778883,2.013491275167785,610,20,116,11,11,198,95,149,0.073,0.762,0.165,0.9259999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,3,8,9,0,1,6,0,14,2,1,4,4,27,23,14,0,0,5,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,6,13,0,1,1,1,0,1,3,2,0,1,7,1,21,7,18,16,4,27,0,0,0,0,5,11,0,0,11,92,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.19097469332562855,0.0,0.0,0.19123549806557835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13308251808066962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33305208963128924,0.0,0.20537477880224114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35404319527257416,0.0,0.0,0.17588228644118928,0.0,0.18448827593104256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511971155494859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730566130335979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20801964735733586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17318809083248052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612621608556329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972192852140413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217301375724571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20446455122940216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980585610540188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22207771919010524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801740059096459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141140784935422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19117018678468067,0.0,0.0,0.16902172120480388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533732592239596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14247172441803505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trashpanic,2020/04/04,"My anxiety issues are health related? How can I snap out of this? 

Cure my anxiety? 

It’s all health related. Shortness of breath = cardiac arrest

I’m healthy. 

Today my HR got elevated quickly. Hit my usually max range after 1 single set of exercise. (180BPM), was a bit short of breath obviously this made me a bit worried 

I’ve had a cardiac workup",0.4087141216991945,2.504338298507463,3.15134328358209,81.64862227324916,106.31343283582086,6.837657864523537,26.049368541905856,7.61054688173877,2.6158275545350183,274,14,49,8,13,95,50,67,0.133,0.825,0.042,-0.5913,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,4,5,2,2,2,5,8,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,6,0,6,3,4,8,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668390585403193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5235224501788445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19176193219047585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.509717856496404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250252313253577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22687139146197816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272691361156381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640672169397757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434929435806112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,monkyonarock,2020/04/04,why can i only do tasks/ big cleans every so often i literally haven’t cleaned my room let alone do school work / any self care for like weeks and today i suddenly finished everything i had to do and cleaned my entire room vacuuming and everything and ?? i wanna do a bunch of stuff and it’ll be like this for a few days and then i’ll go back to not wanting to do anything at all,2.9797890295358616,4.2061804177215185,4.481708860759493,86.38222573839663,73.9367088607595,7.79831223628692,25.824894514767927,8.344100000000001,1.502416033755274,299,10,65,5,6,100,55,79,0.026000000000000002,0.862,0.11199999999999999,0.7622,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,0,11,0,0,0,1,11,14,8,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,6,1,3,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,7,3,8,10,3,12,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,9,44,10,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457697660362007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16137117346386595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952765143068863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824679624302727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24194172005330905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303795453679891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999342904205799,0.0,0.4265373298289744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13486225302346386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24265387815039485,0.0,0.231864202060254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180476265129422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401588343292259,0.0,0.0,0.2475541745201021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716501038560992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22493130968297476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996485219504648,0.0,0.19034660930914934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141250613375174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172756194324657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SlimyFrogNeverSleeps,2020/04/04,"It's not that I can't sleep, it's that I don't want to I tried looking into this but most searches are for people who want to sleep but can't. I even talked to my therapist about this but I don't think she quite understands what I mean when I explain to her. I really hate sleeping. No I don't have night terriers or anything like that. I really have no reason to dislike sleeping as much as I do. I just really don't like it. When I end up passing out I feel like a failed or something. Like ""shit I slept"". Maybe it's because I just like to have more time to do the things I want to do. Sleeping sometimes makes me feel like I'm wasting away, even though I don't do anything that productive anyways. And quarantine isn't helping. I stay up until 5 to 6 am and wake up at 11 to 1pm. Yeah I getting some sleep but waking up that late making me feel like shit. I really don't like it. But some nights I don't sleep and I don't feel bad. I actually feel like I did something good. I never really feel tired, though I can tell that I am. I tend to ramble more and I process things a lot slower. And when I'm rambling I'll just randomly forget what I talking about completely. My focus gets worse too, and I already have ADHD. Even though my lack of sleep is causing all things bad things I still try to stay up late. Though there are rare moments when I actually want to sleep, I end up staying up a lot later than normal. I do look at screens a lot, watch videos or draw really late. I've been told to turn them off and just drift to sleep. I can't do that at all, I've tried and it just makes things worse. When I have nothing distracting me, my brain wonders to places I really don't want it to go to. Every time I end up freaking out and crying for hours until I pass out. Which makes me feel really tired when I wake up. I haven't tried it in a long time but I really don't want to since my mom died over the summer. I just can't let my mind wonder or I'll end up thinking about her. That or I just end up thinking about the stories I'm making. Then I get ideas and get all excited and end up feeling really awake. I even drink coffee later in the day so I can stay up later. I know I should be sleeping, all my friends chew me out for it. But I just can't seem to want sleep or just let it happen. It feels like my only way to actually sleep is to just let my body force me into it, even then it's relatively late. I end up never remembering falling asleep, I just remember waking up. Which I hate and makes me not want to sleep. I really don't know how to like sleep. I've been A night owl for most of my life but I didn't start feeling like this until when I became a teen. I'm 17 right now. It just slowly got worse when I got into high school. I really don't know how to fix this, I feel like it's only gonna get worse from here. I only want to fix this so I can be better in school because I think it's been effecting my grades. I feel like I'm so weird for this, idk if anyone else feels this way. I feel like people think I'm crazy when I tell them. I do have anxiety, maybe that's effecting it? It doesn't feel like it is. If anyone has any solutions or tips I'd love to hear some please.",1.3028400820592978,2.720839390489914,3.1778610853319016,93.22956503687786,78.72622478386168,6.4918282616128575,19.97596834855664,7.270048000033692,0.2413507839593612,2483,57,590,31,59,834,235,694,0.136,0.7190000000000001,0.145,0.8497,1,1,3,0,0,0,65.0,0,0,2,5,45,31,4,1,11,1,55,31,25,12,6,123,126,54,1,14,31,1,15,16,1,2,3,1,0,0,45,19,2,0,35,2,0,5,27,10,0,0,9,20,91,21,76,110,16,89,0,1,4,1,17,34,2,21,60,372,136,4,0.0,0.0,0.10332811339019317,0.0,0.04241757821963288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03894876974902051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02400172378693988,0.0,0.02700048105213935,0.0,0.0,0.04935799135553368,0.036163768093768464,0.058089345920506665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033160694790566415,0.0,0.05893948896712976,0.04303085367396745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031215446745402824,0.0,0.03920464697258039,0.0,0.03940075071110589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03625755674072214,0.0,0.0,0.03700600257176756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038769760403085066,0.02276227305574501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03663050557911526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034575538402632285,0.0,0.0,0.029484337248610357,0.0,0.21882546832087094,0.0,0.0,0.11655965290781962,0.0,0.02973745255243565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676922223666565,0.25214664149242216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027268731138683704,0.0,0.0922005713646831,0.0,0.02005888955798159,0.0296036647139624,0.05645706798215978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03121113941515568,0.0,0.0,0.06969275945324259,0.0,0.0,0.039779886749398516,0.0,0.023657409224459858,0.0372909708898537,0.0,0.0,0.034758340054102346,0.0,0.0,0.039843615235015416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581914170783449,0.0,0.1592566152215346,0.0,0.0,0.108274196081861,0.024929812421062108,0.2758926722523002,0.0,0.0,0.0312348517243185,0.05927760774862958,0.0,0.0,0.09001931598205327,0.031855000666260014,0.0,0.14135760980344994,0.0,0.07091688727377192,0.03844646347795037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035637760046486625,0.04133692839675968,0.0,0.0,0.02594579255587864,0.0,0.05444316345885857,0.0,0.0,0.09936554142418473,0.034581481489979346,0.03386638231750765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08053002353679124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048938041460373664,0.0,0.03687562989944319,0.03874317143488437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037540441707927,0.0,0.0,0.2713295911734992,0.03628900754607823,0.0,0.0,0.0799644210169418,0.030141628485843282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144059106509817,0.0,0.0321311265744835,0.0,0.0,0.0724593593664745,0.02919628347103815,0.0,0.5298054343672155,0.0,0.0,0.0543434347983053,0.03490753164339134,0.0,0.024981892598515708,0.1504785529032207,0.028186530975306743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056737363550749674,0.061698548946727584,0.0,0.0,0.04098006762196955,0.11724172574168196,0.11307764658820753,0.13870813312423946,0.0,0.06174217241387641,0.08113252829533052,0.0,0.033725763447043935,0.0,0.09585160714052113,0.03839068638084157,0.0,0.036743207279693324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873604736917801,0.05603085430546497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07655156785114542,0.0,0.0,0.1438739626554144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GoneComp93,2020/04/05,"Does the joy of others bring you down when you're already feeling down? For the past few months I've really found myself in a rut. I went through a breakup and tried to start something new and it hasn't gone my way so I feel especially triggered when I see happy couples. I graduated college and I have been unemployed and out of school for over 4 months so I feel like I've really been a waste of space. I've lacked a lot of ambition these past few months because I've had very little energy many times sleeping in until 5 pm and feeling so negatively towards myself thinking I was pretty much good for nothing. I don't want to sugar coat my emotions or try to justify them but sometimes I just feel angry! Then when I see people happy and laughing I feel this wave of irritability and then I find myself emotional later on when I'm alone. I often catch myself being so negative as well. When people are speaking positively about something I always feel the need to chime in on how terrible things are going for me and I hate myself for it. I also have tried to open up to my mother and she brushes how I'm feeling off telling me I'm just trying to drag her down to feel how I do and essentially control her life. That isn't my intentions but it's made me feel like maybe I could be even if that isn't my goal. 

I find myself being reckless quite often especially when it comes to driving. I am a pretty small female and I will walk around places at night by myself and my attitude towards it is if something happens to me it happens. I look back and I know that such behavior is stupid but in the midst of my emotions I do not care. I cry every single night and I can't stop thinking about things that are out of my control. I stress out big time and the stress brings a lot of tension causing back pain, I've been unable to fall asleep and stay asleep, and I've been been getting this rash on the side of my face which I think is from stress. I know I said I sleep in until 5 pm but it's not a restful sleep at all I am just in bed trying to sleep until 5 pm. Not to mention I have continuously been losing weight when I'm not trying to. Food was always something I enjoyed and it brought me joy but now almost nothing sounds good and I eat a bit to survive. It is often greasy fast food as well that I never even finish because the idea of it makes me want to gag. 

I wouldn't describe what I'm feeling as envy and maybe more of self pity. Maybe I am in denial and it is envy which is why I get so down when I do see people happy maybe because I want what they have. My mental health has not been well though and because of these feelings I've really grown distant from everyone in my life. I do feel like I need to be happy to make others happy but I feel like I haven't been able to get there. I can't diagnose myself as depressed or having any sort of mental disorders because I have never seen a professional but I've had problems for the last 13 years of my life and I am currently just 24 years old. I never got help because of the cost, I never had good insurance to cover it before, currently I do not have health insurance, and my mom would keep telling me I needed to deal with things on my own and a therapist was going to do nothing but listen which she said anyone could do. I do need some advice and I want to know if anyone has such awful feelings. If others are happy I just want to feel happy for them instead of it making me feel resentment towards myself. I feel like my question is so dark and maybe makes me a bad person but I know that can't entirely be true because there's no way I am the only person feeling this way.",4.293036019188552,4.793769126162019,5.4157487058568465,83.60527034718271,70.22177954847278,7.8468059733853694,27.18673604900128,7.745696148679241,1.483211908827276,2884,89,591,32,49,958,288,753,0.13699999999999998,0.7170000000000001,0.146,-0.4229,4,1,4,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,3,6,43,38,3,4,21,1,65,20,8,13,6,135,137,70,0,19,26,2,20,5,0,3,7,5,1,3,35,34,5,4,31,0,1,13,22,14,3,0,23,32,99,24,89,104,13,94,0,3,5,0,23,35,0,15,47,418,134,6,0.044852749935372915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438295881306264,0.0,0.0,0.0449135500939713,0.04645392205141919,0.049496124887965766,0.035868727918465515,0.07464216205022617,0.0,0.0,0.030501408022385882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272417126638685,0.0,0.0,0.03992845677768287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06897799221055242,0.03745017269541998,0.191392740367008,0.0,0.038166386633871965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0489675861690421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04573036783819548,0.046076129442225035,0.0,0.03863667253542701,0.0,0.0,0.10061234591851978,0.07162254224383204,0.049628714690551856,0.0492686396811254,0.0,0.0462412157057289,0.0386316077959584,0.04552459704143457,0.0,0.0,0.05140513728595645,0.0,0.039250943725792825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04589556068518336,0.0,0.15135991998659634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059249636631908964,0.0,0.03779037630379396,0.04285872468562008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43089906279170975,0.1602140675791681,0.0,0.0,0.08198920172970654,0.0,0.10847224651971883,0.04917872521629575,0.0,0.0,0.0703011318367444,0.0,0.050981702840600635,0.11286107586445117,0.03587284150000178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932627727873771,0.3342261043779038,0.0,0.044282804667680184,0.0,0.09535275154431463,0.0,0.0,0.030063852826289227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050633295181549964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03986718500193291,0.0,0.0,0.09859959345493476,0.03656097761411725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950424711982705,0.1095639400925644,0.044954238675442335,0.0,0.0,0.0376650134919833,0.05017875428857636,0.0,0.07626440809107563,0.0,0.04244075648297318,0.11975823547669046,0.04547364851699374,0.2253030796471228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040204491096901,0.0,0.0,0.05253099863218066,0.107403111234659,0.0,0.032971932026051164,0.13303098299979288,0.1383728233379369,0.0433190653827587,0.0,0.08418253481147875,0.0,0.1291122697450367,0.0,0.04706541601252085,0.0,0.0,0.03411253746817066,0.047726488285239066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856340500155122,0.09328574795187272,0.07832738238470567,0.04686157726127268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126274307789216,0.0,0.04291802419195972,0.0,0.0,0.050245344961663815,0.047706420590388016,0.0,0.0,0.08620146038670415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533047272985059,0.0,0.0,0.045393377508632544,0.1072255037801458,0.0,0.04679120020387849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17954056821985326,0.0,0.0,0.13811935282939647,0.04436051656792999,0.0,0.03174700726009393,0.04780706358283295,0.0,0.037498907319166296,0.15413602052803885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784065608169895,0.0,0.0,0.05207749970036722,0.0893945221394859,0.08621949325176713,0.04406759908165386,0.0,0.052307998367152435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827124379657245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03700821605665747,0.13227657003281265,0.10680607552511152,0.0,0.0546185660200994,0.12098402637186086,0.04157894855056341,0.0404726304177026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03186210666582517,0.0,0.0,0.05776740080641817
mentalhealth,LyreOfHekate,2020/04/05,"been dealing with mental health issues for a couple months. Ways getting help before Covid-19 I see and hear stuff alot. sometimes its tramas from my past and other times its fears. I was getting help before covid-19 and I lost my job and insurance. The doctors told me I had anxiety and psychosis- until they figured out what exactly i have(my mother has schizophrenia, hence why they proceeded cautiously, I still take my mediation for anxiety(because thats all they proscribed for me) but I still get visual and audio hallucinations- does anyone know of ways to cope with them- I'm currently jobless and insuranceless because of covid-19. thanks in advance. Right now I just draw or play videogames when I have a bad panic attack or hallucination.",5.422318681318681,8.738632484615389,4.914505494505495,76.3669230769231,74.15384615384616,7.0989010989010985,30.824175824175825,8.192908349453996,2.7691098901098905,613,28,93,11,14,186,96,130,0.134,0.787,0.078,-0.8225,3,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,4,2,5,7,1,2,4,0,5,2,0,0,2,19,16,12,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,6,10,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,5,0,0,5,3,18,2,12,11,2,16,0,1,1,0,10,3,0,3,10,61,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221300100727803,0.0,0.0,0.11170519954075232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18174565927738184,0.0,0.0,0.13338969425393896,0.1947717062242464,0.0,0.2718813974650865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676711754117702,0.0,0.0,0.16470155358380908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351716693513496,0.13980366460105462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17977005937549798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503979503025367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16981329402952836,0.18005676750668262,0.0,0.21416233079665195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674389217674626,0.1585333067307864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779779022304009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439268597586555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099660245464964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751581758184194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18743939537796656,0.0,0.0,0.15250530140669608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364308608201442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730495069436978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15800289600978612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551629011220075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828825457785085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011672671343016,0.0,0.0,0.14708197918177898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315508323521436,0.0,0.0,0.15265382695091725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536139574865044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441550574673385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coldonezero,2020/04/05,"I just discovered that I don't have to be nice for people And I'm very happy about it. I feel like when I'm nice I'm just fake and everything gets worse than when I'm cold fuck, but being myself atleast. Just wanted to write this out to remember it better. Hell yeah",0.07669172932330781,2.331434614035089,1.8699248120300784,96.15947368421057,88.82456140350875,5.3624060150375925,15.160401002506266,6.868970318607317,-0.3386020050125316,211,4,48,3,7,69,40,57,0.192,0.5870000000000001,0.221,-0.0138,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,6,8,2,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,11,12,5,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,4,5,7,10,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,1,2,0,3,27,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000777475554203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049353427764127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715571135471493,0.24239152125494814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136716025765849,0.17726697941628225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611845037231791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16576178680813813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352235636891121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3843536749457396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799528756884078,0.200124243277181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3457693157304217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MysteriouslyHacked,2020/04/05,"I want to gain the weight back... Most of my life I suffered binge eating disorder. I have always had a fast metabolism, so it wasn't that noticeable to the people around me. My brother always called me fat growing up, even though I wasn't. He was joking, but hearing it so often eventually made me believe it, which is when my binge eating started. In recent years, I've lost my appetite entirely. I can only eat a couple bites at a time, I used to weigh 130 (I'm 5’2”) and now I only weight 89 pounds. 

I never intended to be ”anorexic”, but everyone around me now tells me that that's what I look like, like I'm anorexic. I want to get to a healthy weight again, but I don't know what steps I can take on my own. 

Does anyone have any suggestions or tips?",2.8479653679653687,4.191310441558444,4.279935064935066,87.2351406926407,74.45454545454545,7.2112554112554115,24.52164502164502,7.793537801064563,1.1589151515151521,584,18,124,8,12,194,97,154,0.057,0.831,0.11199999999999999,0.7886,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,2,12,5,0,0,6,0,11,9,1,3,1,16,24,9,0,2,4,1,3,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,9,3,8,0,1,1,0,2,4,2,0,0,6,5,22,3,13,17,2,19,0,2,1,0,6,6,0,3,13,79,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251019331531809,0.0,0.0,0.09198455298110164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458013955969073,0.0,0.0,0.2408283083341477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401011281782237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15239686178532472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381202599084466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496676852585494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15502492772499205,0.0,0.11837094569711636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4152283032650685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934097953574628,0.0,0.0,0.12925110305247114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07067016033404518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524530126570878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433787582374929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955413732701105,0.13216688285165135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358818014383053,0.0,0.14765726793021225,0.0,0.0,0.12799061638075515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432438307545916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539996211271617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20574961705097775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377542853718962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355745454325912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574096609455808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10170213045333544,0.0,0.1182272051546456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13289676330683894,0.0,0.07887386450499906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682516752272472,0.0,0.0,0.15956510801614984,0.0,0.0,0.49414745471490895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710595484901251
mentalhealth,h_brownies,2020/04/05,"Need help supporting my friend My best friend is severely depressed. We talk often and I do my best to support him. But he is constantly depressed and suicidal, but doesn’t have a plan or anything as far as I know. Every time we talk about it he begs me not to call the cops. Someone called them once on him and he was forced into a hospital on a hold and is terrified of going back. I’m not sure about his insurance but I know he doesn’t have money for any pricey help. Is there anything I can do to get him more professional help without ruining our friendship? Sacramento area, California.",2.926347962382444,5.217039879310344,4.0865203761755495,84.54688087774295,76.93103448275863,8.01128526645768,26.92476489028213,8.841846274778883,2.254062068965517,470,19,92,11,11,153,76,116,0.177,0.645,0.17800000000000002,-0.4295,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,3,0,1,3,5,10,0,0,4,0,12,0,0,0,1,20,20,10,1,1,7,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,1,2,0,1,1,5,3,0,0,1,0,16,7,13,19,3,9,0,3,0,0,21,5,0,2,3,62,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072739296416768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596260361348799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129833937154952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3310932177891611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3221563308907514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17046935667299812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717359391151366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290934522663314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437511548383593,0.0,0.08241672717589793,0.0,0.08965172361094938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31720512349575186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733881570847437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169680125914938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679962841000182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17821013985133696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365921926236374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17255051581670014,0.3580207222851421,0.1486754571379511,0.0,0.0,0.2535834509065216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198402467873892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520632729759575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,covidcrazyness,2020/04/05,"Social isolation is driving me crazy I've been in social isolation/quarentine for about a month now and this is driving me crazy, I only leave the house for what is essential.
I'm working remotely and I've noticed that I'm starting to confuse days in a sense that I can't recall on which day I've made a certain task, this was not usual when I worked at the office.
I'm also a lot more temperamental in the sense that I lose my mind for simple tasks that I can't achieve right away such as giving meds to my cats, this episode also lead to me mistreating my gf who has been living with me for the past 4 years.
My sleep routine is also totally messed up, I can't go to sleep at decent hours and when I wake up in the morning I feel like crap, this makes me way less productive at work.
Basically I'm becoming something I never tought I would become.
Any advices on how to handle this whole situation?
I should also refer that I used to smoke a joint everyday after dinner(just one and only one) and since this whole isolation thing started it became impossible for me or pretty much anyone I know to get some weed.",5.857170329670327,5.7914863928571485,6.670178571428572,77.93059065934067,66.76785714285714,9.570879120879123,30.62362637362637,9.265573868473778,2.513306043956044,888,30,173,15,13,295,132,224,0.1,0.852,0.048,-0.8439,1,3,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,6,10,6,1,1,10,0,13,4,4,5,3,25,27,14,0,2,2,0,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,0,3,0,0,4,5,4,0,2,4,1,23,2,28,21,8,33,0,1,0,0,5,13,1,4,16,117,39,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11809882544546264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3865931502499027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218604407463098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450513990141911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354794129769248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669513281627378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588390177343647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0611082908909878,0.0863393611847263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314213336633118,0.11593583344226024,0.06868509928430501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901855437574295,0.13945129171186865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06641915126902141,0.0,0.0,0.1279687731042082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904400742961745,0.0,0.10671782812613057,0.0,0.0,0.13520665369101306,0.0,0.10274722399862016,0.0,0.11435661856365255,0.08067214152838162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342434765361343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202984018570355,0.0,0.0964658945930819,0.0,0.08884287101532988,0.0,0.09321139330056773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13759505524839272,0.0,0.0,0.16378994752410772,0.183832464770082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537047410563307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295373084853188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321013728883116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997311282583056,0.13584690972223218,0.24188603100013426,0.2463944040865759,0.0,0.09304064922892327,0.0,0.0,0.17108462245420078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802911801229438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438055147173923,0.13310551765980655,0.0,0.0,0.09592965701892374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698622240926408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639532432496875,0.0,0.0,0.0858524465764406,0.0,0.0,0.07782713088636267
mentalhealth,Dredgen_saint76,2020/04/05,"Self quarantine is fucking me up I've been inside the house for the past month and for the month to come, I'm quite sure it's gonna last that long maybe even more, now I've been dealing with anxiety, depressive episodes, panick attacks and lots and lots and lots of stress, now, when I was outside, working, then going to class, and then back home, Everything was fine, usual episodes every now and then etc, but since if stayed inside, after a week or so, my anxiety starting rising so much, to the point I try to go bed next to my mom, because I'm genuinely scared for my own safety. I keep popping Xanax, doctor prescribed them, my asthma keeps kicking my chest keeps hurting ,my stomach keeps turning, my appetite is lost, And this lump in my throat won't go away, I keep having diarrhea out of nowhere,I even got a rash, on my leg ,that  even my mom gets whenever she's overstressed.. I'm sleeping a lot, or not sleeping at all, my mood is gone, I don't wanna play video games, I don't wanna text my girlfriend, I don't wanna have sex, nothing, I know all those symptoms are caused by my anxiety, but for the love of God, I want this feeling of dread, that I keep getting since I got locked up inside 5 weeks ago, to go away, I begun praying, mediating, listening to asmr, called Mental health lines, and it does indeed help, until the night comes... some things left me scarred few weeks ago that made my head even more scared and unable to cope. I even brought a doctor to see me,he said that I'm perfectly fine and fully functional, and my lungs where perfect even for an asthmatic. It's all caused by stress and Overthinking. Please, for the love of God, I want my mind to relax and go back to how it was..",10.156691626957114,6.219745985250739,9.129852507374633,76.05187882913549,61.12389380530973,12.20068073519401,39.056274109371465,9.265573868473778,3.3623771726798286,1335,44,276,15,13,418,188,339,0.106,0.743,0.15,0.9583,0,1,0,1,0,0,57.0,0,0,1,5,16,20,2,5,12,0,15,20,9,4,6,52,53,26,0,6,6,2,1,0,1,2,7,2,2,1,13,17,0,6,2,4,0,10,5,10,0,0,12,4,34,9,38,39,14,48,1,3,1,4,14,11,1,8,26,164,47,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365355584289863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767452418765222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761392062555844,0.14471334813712644,0.118437182950409,0.0,0.04694668603664253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863934596719163,0.0,0.0,0.1582280607918503,0.0,0.1326805407645182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793974882259751,0.06633157407991952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576530646369502,0.06739499156249364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589035750055117,0.3051999556075128,0.0,0.06488715557847925,0.0,0.06921472555413366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038940315749925535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119769616991399,0.08047270098897374,0.0,0.21884260011600748,0.0,0.1231893870937218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790380209928358,0.08186169905472551,0.0,0.0,0.051620494062984135,0.0,0.07725077248902162,0.0,0.0,0.08886318455023247,0.08244449409253551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4107185726176631,0.0,0.0,0.042324579603636066,0.06277624291109145,0.0,0.0,0.08367534184613773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815448228905488,0.0,0.0,0.08406928125556018,0.26189633430082804,0.13901529598337278,0.07287199118211901,0.0,0.0,0.07737036468676635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761144670265964,0.0,0.07776163329819215,0.1803944503509473,0.12294280660720087,0.0,0.05661374911693149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190468079112956,0.07227190845351246,0.0,0.07389648506177746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735180549871101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453764450960446,0.07280260587915756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191328686584412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325742955159625,0.0,0.15420780279138654,0.0,0.06136975094604207,0.0,0.08034182731935433,0.0,0.0,0.1274126480442904,0.0,0.15413814206397036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05451051830436562,0.08208609375869327,0.0,0.0,0.1764373000478508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07258426788245594,0.08004646542246988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051164316009084776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052287079180769074,0.08376852171738026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848194379217136,0.0,0.09084905966649534,0.0,0.18532663945885267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056066710891410784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yourgirltarantina,2020/04/05,"How do I get over my existential terror For as long as I can remember, I've always lived in absolute terror of death. Not, like dying but of being dead. The idea that I just don't exist anymore for the rest of eternity. What happens to my memories and my personality? It all just vanishes? 

These thoughts aren't always debilitating but sometimes they are and I've had them at least one every single day for my whole life. 

It's like being at a party as a kid and then your mum says you gotta be ready to leave soon. You can't enjoy the rest of the party the same way because you know you have to go soon and you don't want to. 

A family member died today. I'm obviously incredibly sad. I'm also so so anxious because this is like the equivalent of my mum waving at me from across the room at this metaphorical party and tapping her watch. I'm in bed trying to sleep and I can't. I'm just so afraid. 

How do I stop being so scared of something that is inevitable and totally out of my control? I've been considering looking into hypnotherapy but it's pretty expensive and I don't even know if it would work for something like this. 

Does anyone have any coping mechanisms that can help me?",2.2191719285585414,4.35816779253112,4.262496842864877,83.16554032112576,78.54356846473028,7.178856215046004,22.926393649648205,8.18289091462,1.3994133501713877,942,30,187,18,23,322,135,241,0.188,0.73,0.08199999999999999,-0.978,0,0,2,0,0,0,18.0,0,6,2,2,13,10,0,4,10,0,22,2,1,3,3,33,35,23,4,3,8,2,0,4,0,2,1,1,2,2,12,10,0,2,5,0,1,1,7,5,0,1,3,3,23,5,30,26,8,21,0,1,2,0,15,11,0,1,12,133,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200435832975104,0.2498084854849217,0.0,0.0,0.10208051768520242,0.0,0.0,0.16958252012900196,0.14886961578488056,0.10496098851483808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830123477158318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683620695370406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968090724586508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3115827017908969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313630063314127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09914679308585396,0.0,0.12647485564530794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14151113899479753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842671750851174,0.0,0.08531144881282403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13274251871766607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061613083130323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16945686508789504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649939821801532,0.0,0.0,0.15894570365444902,0.0,0.0,0.10602772452209223,0.2933462931565903,0.0,0.13255062053435104,0.13284336834064894,0.12605529794099765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171898905190203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107099411425993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15271668855295892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17004631763674724,0.0,0.0,0.11937416376579713,0.1502871363642369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502192467305678,0.0,0.0,0.23112531442519035,0.14846345757919788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254993824862284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917123820836753,0.0,0.0,0.14228752287774662,0.0,0.0,0.10191540579251178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853926177219296,0.11915099649964038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675933903938822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928247822362916,0.0,0.0,0.10663443276459453,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tea_and_bread,2020/04/05,"What's Happening to Me? I am really distressed and I don't know what to do or what to tell my therapist. Here's a list of what I'm feeling:

-I don't feel connected to reality or to myself
-I can't stand being in my body, it feels like a prison
-I don't recognize myself if the mirror/when I look into my phone camera
-I am incredibly anxious
-I feel the intense urge to know what is wrong with me and how I can stop it

I feel like this is more than just depersonalization or realization but I honestly don't know. I have been told I dissociate and I know what that feels like but this feels different. I'm in panic mode. 

What's wrong with me? How do I describe this to my therapist?

Edit: I also experience dysphoria quite often. Is this just an extreme version of that?",1.0564779874213848,3.4076115345911973,3.73676100628931,84.00501572327046,84.59748427672956,7.306918238993711,22.040880503144656,8.344100000000001,1.5285371069182392,610,21,127,15,18,214,82,159,0.124,0.7909999999999999,0.085,-0.7847,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,0,2,5,0,16,1,1,2,0,29,32,12,0,1,8,0,7,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,15,6,0,1,11,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,8,25,4,15,29,2,5,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,5,4,93,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758403445622992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16610797797166735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163323013461001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536205389800313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14382868609391564,0.0,0.0,0.5204180740325808,0.3151260309887385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002278394190936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232269073084904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21550198495395456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347257628714915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17251418265164528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563900848459072,0.0,0.0,0.09419454472363664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292805087235595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12851528732293266,0.0,0.0,0.3414385106202701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404984802259923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3215199227407616,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fadingcandle,2020/04/05,"If you cant afford therapy, should you just kill yourself? Title, i want a therapist but have low income, i already have a means to commit suicide.

I want a meaning to live but I dont have it and have begun to hate everything and everyone.

I dont care about how my death will affect my family, I am the chief of miserible everyday and I am sick and tired of feeling aimless. My sister commited suicide last year so I know what I will be doing to my family but I just dont care.

My life simply doesnt matter and I am unworthy of help because I can not afford it.

I want to be better and make progress but I am aimless and starving for purpose, but no one even wants to talk to me about such things.

I dont have the strength to do this alone and the only thing I am passionate about doing is dying.",3.1917269076305246,4.162928915662654,5.017048192771085,83.73151606425706,73.09638554216869,8.183935742971888,27.086345381526108,8.59863814320734,1.897933333333333,624,22,129,11,12,214,91,166,0.305,0.575,0.12,-0.9919,3,1,0,1,0,3,13.0,0,2,0,3,9,9,2,1,6,0,26,4,0,3,2,32,38,16,5,6,9,1,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,6,8,0,0,4,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,0,1,24,5,15,33,0,5,0,2,0,1,5,1,0,1,4,100,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855964855963373,0.13697884139077168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566755661729371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978153498129793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531144737907692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12882574330634894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5819105189465464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08198567662653912,0.0,0.0,0.11861006218589215,0.11155865529102656,0.0,0.23403452839133795,0.0,0.06276307862077819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225511550781523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320068969457911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732974895746478,0.0,0.06821775494358888,0.10118126146302334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767560165651274,0.0,0.0,0.10960770362351653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828567103976898,0.0,0.0,0.2704245631745377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0841126564322288,0.09440528667377353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27155277502881386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976975361261747,0.0,0.0,0.1419517110120913,0.14412270834598134,0.1649308654238464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426674038308727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928567252042849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07993465802151509
mentalhealth,juvenesque,2020/04/05,"I'm feeling myself spiral back down into depression and I don't know how to stop it or let people help It's been a while since I've felt this bad and I don't really know where to start.  


I'm a 19F who has been previously diagnosed with GAD and depression. Throughout the year I was in therapy, I didn't try hard enough and they decided not to refer me to adult psychiatry once I hit 18. Instead, I was referred to social work. The social work already knew of me due to them reaching out after I ended up in A&E for a psych evaluation after I phoned either my nurse or 111(that part is unclear in my memory) for severely suicidal thoughts. 

Social work tried to help me get back into society (I was previously doing nothing) but I was never comfortable with the social worker. The only thing I got out of it for the time I was there was her mentioning my old nurse's evaluation. She said that I showed very strong autistic traits to my social work but never once to me while she treated me. Despite already somewhat knowing that, it had upset me for a long time but I eventually came to terms with it.

Around the time I left therapy and all throughout social work, I had started talking to a friend of a friend. Over the months we got closer and closer and he became the person I could share with. Eventually, after months of friendship and a weekend together (he lives in another close-by country), we became a couple. It's been 8 months since then and we talk and visit each other regularly. I hadn't been that happy in a long time and he feels the same way. I love him and that's something I struggled to say and come to terms with for a very long time and even to this day -  I still have difficulties expressing myself to him. He's understanding though, he loves me regardless. 

Since then I've been happy. I got a new social worker and I'm building up my confidence so that I can try and attend college. My family life is getting better little by little. So why? Why am I spiraling back down - why am I becoming the person that I was 2 years ago?

I play games with my boyfriend and our friends but now I can't bring myself to do it most of the time. I'm always so angry or so tired of something or someone. I have a long and tiresome history with a friend that makes it so hard sometimes. One day we can be chill and the next I'll be so angry at him for existing. He's my boyfriend's friend and at the end of the day, he's my friend too. I don't want my boyfriend to not play with him but I can't stand to be there so I leave and I let them play.

On top of the depressing mood I wake up with every day and the lack of contact with people, I'm worrying all the time. I used to not care about my health since I just didn't care about being alive. But now that I'm happy and I have my boyfriend, I'm terrified. Almost every minute of every day, I'm thinking that I could be dying. What if this is wrong with me? What does this pain mean? I stand in the shower and will think that a tugging sensation in my stomach is cancer. I'll feel pain in my side and think that it's more cancer. I feel a lump? Cancer. I've always felt this way, even since I was a child, but now it's overwhelming. The thought of dying scares me so much now that I have something to lose. 

I know I should phone the doctor and they'll probably treat me for the anxiety but I can request tests for peace of mind. I just need to get around to it - the doctors are still scary to me and phoning can take me a while. 

My boyfriend wants to help but I could never accept it. I've never been someone who can be comforted. Soothing words don't work and hugs when I'm upset just make me feel uncomfortable and awkward. I want to let him help though. I want him to feel like he's someone I'd turn to because he is. He's the kindest, most understanding and loving person I've ever met. There is no one in the world that matters more to me. He makes me comfortable but I still can't be comforted by him (or anyone else) and it makes me mad at myself. I want to be comforted. I want to know what that feels like and I just don't know how to get there.   


Maybe you guys might have an idea haha",2.699510700257349,4.193392539719625,4.06718610321008,87.9989570635243,75.12149532710279,7.111851550860084,23.737572802383852,7.793537801064563,1.0538520791006365,3258,97,695,46,69,1075,315,856,0.168,0.6970000000000001,0.134,-0.9848,2,0,3,0,0,0,79.0,5,1,4,12,41,48,1,6,42,1,67,18,2,7,7,147,134,66,3,14,24,0,11,2,6,4,12,2,1,6,39,56,0,1,29,6,0,5,19,15,0,2,30,13,108,32,94,85,16,101,0,5,0,4,74,34,0,12,60,463,147,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04178337618785235,0.0,0.047200071681116965,0.0,0.1040318851554373,0.0,0.07844214923631984,0.05107202724469225,0.0,0.0,0.04942639064907792,0.036059045793460025,0.0,0.0,0.03295871038603908,0.04829658283639885,0.0,0.08392238057690228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087344299196676,0.039356738267084836,0.028733775523572137,0.05205820333738303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041688117388805096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05391122837886466,0.09611694624230573,0.0,0.0,0.04060364209412128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290320362628625,0.052155282446714864,0.0,0.15199467092741234,0.0,0.121794958535517,0.047842226657965815,0.09783981815466604,0.0,0.0,0.09649174739076648,0.04124918545812276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039376226852566414,0.0,0.083497322751085,0.04870427033284018,0.0,0.06226599968728856,0.0426373699910196,0.11914278430429955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04443579193110125,0.0,0.16683426887500508,0.06734818742440139,0.09051624222784503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21850375694282725,0.0,0.09850682641104606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11309731829232808,0.0,0.0,0.046672225200166284,0.0,0.1505320082501122,0.08444951081509347,0.0,0.0,0.050103551138429216,0.0,0.0,0.1263775413381874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053211005521051104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554288584090328,0.0,0.0,0.049910404693945934,0.05121359338523891,0.14459980128600508,0.03329367524887932,0.046056709524984085,0.09448566338717147,0.04162210717998191,0.1668561306747375,0.0,0.052733324226976935,0.0,0.0,0.12762671808223466,0.0,0.12585505458992016,0.0,0.04735462454903129,0.05134511435077397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05000403410479172,0.047594100972166965,0.0,0.1128709384683298,0.0,0.03465051308209609,0.034950877409279366,0.1454172998260904,0.045524412720598005,0.05012985816177232,0.0,0.0,0.04522843235598847,0.0,0.04946148778808653,0.10039697863894807,0.06388138580551536,0.035849186055291735,0.1003124296982994,0.0,0.0,0.05104388546302628,0.0,0.06535657919035626,0.12347247285341907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05082077031651919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03019664147943881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044837297664131484,0.03748457924037471,0.04719153537198075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05325046235322264,0.0,0.19495766031872014,0.0,0.0,0.3363457696273002,0.1198149874540638,0.1088631939658017,0.046618883553779085,0.0,0.06672645627888191,0.0,0.11292903366069848,0.03940795394095977,0.0,0.04927696574971333,0.0,0.051559326277344865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0354405383504343,0.07577254592338341,0.0,0.0,0.10780865093973996,0.0,0.03131518100925553,0.09060887534559957,0.09262210763196747,0.07484171751869516,0.1923983839043847,0.05417610055708084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600710866731764,0.05127062423724641,0.0,0.09814084359004976,0.0,0.04071052210439954,0.0,0.07778456376793809,0.1668128279564104,0.07482900535534577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275992024350355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205894186078404,0.04786907499923493,0.0,0.0,0.05153600913930298,0.0,0.06070830413516441
mentalhealth,lookingoceans,2020/04/05,"Can't understand myself I've been feeling lately that all the bad things that happened to me have been caused by a bad side of me. This reminds me of the film ""Split"" where the main character had a mental disorder, where a lot of personalities were inside him . (Sorry 4 my basic english) The thing here is that, I broke up with my gf months ago and today I was looking atvthe lst conversation we had and I was talking like someone who's just not me, that shocked me a bit, don't remember if I had a mental breakdown that day, can' remember if I was crying at that moment, is very confussing.",3.7892307692307696,5.291889974358977,5.011623931623934,82.28615384615388,72.33333333333333,7.935042735042735,27.52991452991453,8.515128840125781,1.9628735042735048,465,17,91,8,9,154,80,117,0.135,0.813,0.052000000000000005,-0.8919,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,9,0,15,0,0,1,1,15,19,4,0,2,4,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,10,4,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,9,2,15,1,8,10,4,11,0,1,1,0,7,5,0,3,7,69,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608394063391202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029967894342828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980901599070711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863932565023924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993080214153614,0.11701654997320353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20795086426902085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174367966764416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16045057741596666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20467705079359885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864451001550934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15236749713927986,0.0,0.0,0.15425743819418927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36570631581716745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14482709307298994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15843014650677212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41108199717539134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15373714948261644,0.0,0.0,0.20311201619660346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458380391322218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410870342447373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17198796154666954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888898942689221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14971053323378716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Summerlin1,2020/04/05,"Is this enough to cause someone mental harm? So I’m 22 years old now, I’m a male. I have a serious porn addiction/ I cheat on every girl I’m with and I really don’t think I’m capable of love at all. I don’t love myself, I’ve never really loved anyone besides my mom and somes I don’t even love her. Alright backstory I was adopted when I was younger apparently my mom couldn’t take care of me so she gave me away, My mom and dad were the nicest parents, they got me what I wanted. I had a cousin let’s call him Greg he was a couple years older than me he maybe 4 or 5 years older than me. Growing up me and him would hang out all the time, because our dads were brothers so we got really close. I truly love this guy like a brother but we also had a dark side to our relationship. From the ages to like 5 to 11 we used to do sexual things with each other.  He used to let me
Penetrate him give me head , we would also watch porn and do sexual things whenever we were alone together. Whenever we would hang out with our female cousins we’d do sexual things to them aswell we got caught once by our parents with the females as we never did it again. The last time I remember doing something sexual with this man was when I was a middle schooler and he was in high school. I would penetrate this man he never tried to penetrate me but he would make me eat soap and shit if I didn’t want to do sexual things tbh I actually remember liking doing sexual things with him as a young kid. I just thought it was normal as I got older I realized this behavior was not normal so I stopped doing it. So I guess for the majority of my teen years I kinda tried to forget that it ever happened. Which worked okay I guess I didn’t think about it at all I tried my best not too. But lately I’ve been thinking about it more and more and trying to connect the dots to see why I’m so sexual and have so many mental issues and why I don’t love myself or anyone. And this is the only thing I can think of that could have possibly traumatized me. Because other than this I had a pretty decent childhood. So yeah do you guys think that this could be causing me pain without me even knowing?",2.0635863474274068,3.7305925364238455,3.9179249448123614,87.66127865511974,77.27814569536423,7.295160468670403,21.5491594498217,8.139509932561175,1.0021916454406523,1701,45,365,30,39,575,205,453,0.063,0.8190000000000001,0.11800000000000001,0.972,3,1,1,0,0,0,27.0,13,1,2,2,21,18,2,0,17,3,48,13,2,5,7,80,84,33,0,13,10,11,0,3,0,5,2,0,0,7,27,30,1,1,10,0,0,4,13,5,0,0,25,2,69,13,42,47,10,40,0,0,2,8,56,12,1,7,27,253,96,2,0.0,0.0,0.0678389727364613,0.07578424764380731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07199908051586826,0.0,0.11118610939006697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721639116501098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0653139033321262,0.0,0.0,0.0847543465211083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295424214226134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098505710386603,0.0,0.07087764155538982,0.14282707711518106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100800444915923,0.07691970165509271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113367447071095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183007679343939,0.0,0.0918311989604422,0.06288248524811907,0.058571423597131925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668744260474893,0.0,0.0,0.2223977213921985,0.0,0.153162548533293,0.13766634824167145,0.061474023856306875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134492746027825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344896972888285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255812403037316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038204955332597386,0.05666597468484935,0.07841867636726962,0.0,0.0,0.14217254133581744,0.0,0.1018880980894828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3764531076265878,0.0,0.046403416857786726,0.07047975146859102,0.06983959095652159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011441494949392,0.0,0.0,0.24425388210994725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16084835696470165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622462094857946,0.0,0.0,0.07294683693763157,0.07403378221439412,0.0,0.05287112956905557,0.0739714349411664,0.0,0.15438173348171486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837044450813106,0.0,0.07072420687849558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360391572745858,0.0,0.0,0.07463569161894801,0.15749936776945214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035533917918971,0.055396382329683885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135863140171662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05890188335311353,0.05351790530278554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05811967489722975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052268447384910814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2771057044472644,0.2227197748699632,0.0,0.055189065352817056,0.08107233188818459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887910564764737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008145934950112,0.0,0.0,0.0820063494799308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545731544077984,0.0,0.0,0.06701231098425696,0.0,0.050609508831789586,0.0,0.0,0.2469158988016863,0.0,0.0,0.17906775394551078
mentalhealth,DangerousFee4,2020/04/05,"Strange disorder going on need help I'm 26yr old male and have some mental illness that's been holding me back from prosuing a relationship with a girl. I believe there is something odd going on and can't understand why I'm still single after years of opportunities. I don't have alot of dating experience, this is causing me insecurities and low confindence. I need someone to talk with maybe hear there presepctive. 

Everyone finds me odd to why I'm not in a relationship or talking to anyone.

Can someone pm me with some dating advice while having mental illness",6.876552197802197,8.271314759615386,7.5639010989010975,67.29538461538462,64.86538461538461,10.173626373626377,35.049450549450555,10.290406445055957,3.979402747252746,461,21,73,11,7,153,70,104,0.182,0.769,0.05,-0.9022,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,4,0,9,2,0,1,0,17,18,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,2,6,0,1,2,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,1,1,7,1,13,17,4,14,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,4,8,48,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16328649028542852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683899186579072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12848825114930146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882625229503924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17165594712264298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19150908799435448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596695527041527,0.0,0.16345416646288355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527247866423931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18993158915402664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18833188858338595,0.0,0.11200244450921946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16787266636608142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33679149765550953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24780249187509576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17534151978804602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3588020028911529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831636347534402,0.12864040780392225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334448899926517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2686145110987884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17395518652903386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30156038673373153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076058038975787
mentalhealth,Authentic2017,2020/04/05,"Mental Health. Curable vs Treatable I’m not referring to genetic mental illness like someone who always had anxiety or depression from preschool. I mean mental health caused by a trauma. Like being depressed since your divorce at 42. Or developing anxiety after being bullied at 13. Do those things go away once the (I guess you would call these traumas) are treated? I would assume so since it makes sense seeing as how these people in the examples did not have any disorders prior and was triggered by an event, especially if they only feel depressed or anxious when reminded of their event.

So are these triggered illnesses treatable or curable?",5.823141233766233,8.960101330357146,5.659480519480523,72.62188311688313,71.41071428571428,8.001298701298701,34.28896103896104,8.841846274778883,3.723203571428572,527,27,73,11,11,164,85,112,0.222,0.7390000000000001,0.039,-0.9715,0,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,2,2,0,4,8,0,0,4,0,11,4,0,5,0,21,18,11,0,3,8,0,1,2,0,2,4,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,3,2,7,3,11,11,0,10,0,3,1,0,7,4,0,7,7,52,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275983179609625,0.0,0.0,0.10428230512611884,0.0,0.2346225153347765,0.17324026669500628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14407605566336856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15658606386694826,0.0,0.0,0.15753125186870662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39623676802729707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17575077870404546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753765871299154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715154211193635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16893076927138656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32600477734868216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498367580036572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236137987613572,0.0,0.0,0.16704157880566012,0.0,0.0,0.4636179561536192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16331125201705998,0.0,0.11662851886283745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631260940145996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219897842416952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25370308970326183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12993176937392156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018779944793758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178688883377404,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wyntre_willow,2020/04/05,"Ticks? Or something else? So, I made these random noises at random times.
I always thought they were ticks, but they have gotten more frequent, and more random.
If they are ticks, how do minimize them?
If they aren't ticks, what could they be and how do I minimize/stop it?",1.486593406593407,4.187993153846159,1.8302197802197813,95.17192307692308,88.61538461538461,4.509890109890111,17.043956043956047,6.1826913282559595,-0.2827505494505496,212,5,42,2,7,64,34,52,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,3,0,14,11,9,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,9,0,1,5,2,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,6,2,32,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3654212506817113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506382752703973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.366866798109844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4155494398313457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3380914034905939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3671623981777684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486487084444401,0.2560811967252473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lozzamm,2020/04/05,"I can’t grieve My old best friend died while we weren’t talking and i can’t process the guilt. 

So when I was 22 I went through a really tough time mentally. I was out of an abusive relationship, loads of trauma and attachment issues I’d never dealt with, repeatedly attempting suicide and self-harming - honestly it felt like I’d lost like 3 years of my life because I was just actively trying to die or felt like I was nothing. This girl who id known since I was 18 was there for me through it, she stopped me going through with it, she told people who were nasty to me or called me an attention seeker to back off. Eventually I started getting help, it got to the point where I can tell what’s my anxiety and what’s real, I can do what’s best for me and I take care of myself.

She was struggling too, and she got very involved in alcohol and substance abuse. She wasn’t getting better, she got worse - and she was making me worse too. She would call me and tell me she was going to self-harm, when I didn’t reply to her messages fast enough she’d threaten suicide, she’d insult me and my family - then tell me I obviously was still I’ll when I got upset. I kept forgiving her, and giving her second chances - then one day she messaged my mom telling her I was going to commit suicide because I hadn’t replied to her message fast enough. I cut her off then, she got obsessed with me, asking my friends to see pictures of me, obsessing over my social media, making fake accounts to contact me... I know she was ill, but I couldn’t handle it.

Two years ago she called me when she was in hospital (sectioned) and I agreed to talk to her once she got out and was in a better place. I never did. I always meant too, I just never did.

Last week she died in her sleep of “flu like symptoms” (possibly covid-19 but I’m not sure). I thought I’d have more time. I didn’t think us not talking would be forever.

I feel so guilty, and I don’t think I’ll ever stop feeling that. She died thinking I didn’t care, and now I can’t even grieve because I don’t deserve too. I wish I’d have had more time.",4.104560439560442,4.581372195804196,4.963445720945722,86.76626748251749,70.63170163170162,7.900133200133201,28.84124209124209,7.83500028581142,1.621801132201132,1628,58,351,19,28,530,198,429,0.174,0.708,0.11800000000000001,-0.9701,1,0,1,0,1,4,52.0,2,0,0,6,19,28,2,5,6,0,40,6,1,2,7,59,76,29,9,4,8,1,4,4,2,2,5,0,0,1,12,21,1,3,13,0,1,4,17,13,0,3,38,5,84,15,35,32,7,48,0,3,1,0,58,13,0,2,35,232,96,0,0.0,0.17276106260263185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462590447400858,0.07791329826233807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606628198316362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0557721434092621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815635549524457,0.0,0.0,0.056059462894457616,0.0,0.1333266768928917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301864851095812,0.12895713740113884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233325407176263,0.0,0.14866306059763965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047017708859865136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026556165969229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15066075598369222,0.0,0.048153080422199734,0.06594676762534309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872836775217697,0.0,0.07372594084057033,0.0,0.1400005111426015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126524805775471,0.0,0.07617973144459324,0.06993714169583222,0.1243008148148892,0.0,0.3498528436460566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04886670046397682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609390318912321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04006669427129194,0.059427324636745535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051494974138740886,0.142470847581442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958444528494289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732933857393697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347111621921433,0.0,0.0,0.08538548236198222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16868654567030972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0699543362845114,0.0,0.07650155819300537,0.0776414706392977,0.049402330704127834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05054316367967294,0.0,0.07617023248908611,0.0,0.06891881217085909,0.08218945978804419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298187765648739,0.0467048248784992,0.0,0.0,0.07827271126976898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580958646651072,0.0,0.15211167896041933,0.0,0.0,0.060307788799014335,0.0,0.07295767461198252,0.07431749028761304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05160255085635985,0.0,0.05822204592313584,0.1219037281934636,0.0,0.076216159914713,0.0,0.23923878815561045,0.0,0.06871212183055153,0.07577623422641427,0.054815504511779585,0.17579488883023772,0.2548888157477935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14014378580265344,0.0,0.057878445069741664,0.1275345164264494,0.0,0.0,0.06966387420739488,0.0,0.04949772532872912,0.0,0.0712176144217472,0.0,0.08769576668276508,0.0,0.0,0.06015427959936686,0.0,0.0,0.058480012269166076,0.0,0.0,0.0675836871663622,0.0,0.0,0.08383717902469802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14859289474475507,0.103579273859979,0.0,0.0,0.09389688966682452
mentalhealth,Pickler71,2020/04/05,"What’s everyone do when they start feeling like a ball of dirt? I’m struggling through self confidence issues right now and sometimes I can’t help but feel like a walking human garbage can. I don’t feel good about my looks, hobbies, intelligence, or basically anything right now. I know I’m not the suck of the earth but it sure does feel that way, and I need to know what everyone else does to cope with this feeling. Thank you",3.7464285714285697,5.672982690476192,3.84,88.905,73.28571428571428,7.180952380952381,28.66666666666667,7.957251820313856,1.7198523809523818,342,14,70,5,7,105,60,84,0.039,0.6459999999999999,0.315,0.9742,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,0,4,7,1,1,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,16,18,6,0,1,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,3,0,0,7,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,6,7,5,7,18,0,8,0,0,1,0,5,2,1,1,6,36,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749782892899274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31370524611353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973058011469265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425397073135697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4531412888723926,0.2560957201533245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15033656187579258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013963811772665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870781924154208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970093378363066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751335358050004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051500939590953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290291041859498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30613701645944713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18698461212105116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17727123792084964,0.0,0.1268657741769319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873787627144252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689299537853798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501852297560235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14227100051018626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ambedo-in-Elysium,2020/04/05,"Hey there. I'm growing desperate trying to figure out what's going on in my head. I don’t feel it’s important enough to worry about seeing a specialist but i don’t even know what ‘it’ is. 
Hey guys. For a good few years, I’ve been trying to find out what caused a certain type of experience for me that I used to feel almost daily. The best way I can describe it is you know when you’re zoned out and then you like come back to reality? For some reason what would happen would be that my brain seemed to think it was stuck in the transition between zoning out and being active in the present moment. So I would be talking with friends for example. Then if I’m listening to them my mind could suddenly start to feel like I was zoning out. But instead of zoning out in the present moment, it would feel like my brain was thinking back to a memory or moment of the past and trying to come back to what it thinks is the present- which doesn’t even exist because what my brain thought it was reflecting on, was my real and live life. So you would have one part of me determined that my mind was wandering and I needed to snap back to the “present” and the other part fighting it trying to actually focus on my real life at the moment. I wouldn’t feel as if I was looking on at myself so to say, more just feeling like I was literally stuck in a memory and that my real present life was nothing more than a memory or dream. These episodes could range from only a few minutes, to 15-30 minutes, to longer. I’m still in high school and my parents aren’t particularly mental health aware. At first it was suggested it was a panic attack because of a change in place. Seemed reasonable until this continued happening randomly years on, whether in school or outside in general. I should mention I’ve had a trauma free life as of now, and I’m not a user of drugs or anything along those lines. It’s been a while since I experienced an episode of this- however I never did find out what happened with my strange dreamlike mindset, so thoughts would be massively appreciated. Thank you for reading this :)",5.432138200782268,5.955621009685235,6.033571428571428,80.09710327807788,67.71670702179175,9.162562860867943,30.412460420935002,9.162432508145574,2.45855902402682,1659,60,324,29,26,540,199,413,0.061,0.8,0.139,0.9879,3,0,1,0,2,0,32.0,0,4,1,2,17,14,2,1,22,0,38,10,4,4,2,77,72,29,0,13,11,1,6,4,1,8,6,3,0,1,29,21,0,0,21,2,1,4,7,4,0,2,19,12,32,11,64,39,9,59,0,0,2,0,16,26,0,11,32,235,61,4,0.0,0.0,0.07540043639119759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737070321048094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358330596164456,0.0,0.0,0.08790119001486484,0.0,0.2376510319140362,0.0,0.09420123059009183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810858636595938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25876311201827484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937343026109653,0.08173714619456605,0.13311557503357188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338117221937195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960398943690588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983639665769328,0.0,0.10206688274663013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558094024763312,0.0,0.0,0.2344079618535771,0.16559646316369414,0.0,0.0,0.14123938500120625,0.06572239061971914,0.0,0.0,0.0596954931305113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04391202867945312,0.0648070258415261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650545339276361,0.20497811384150755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929717163762473,0.08213010800306532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08163573454385584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08492670770752357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183009452926508,0.15099299117948067,0.0,0.06822726294514392,0.0,0.06488395092816691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786591988155943,0.0,0.15603319782077293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05729173424245242,0.059592275741262773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413877758771419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05235741775165665,0.05876424835454089,0.0,0.09065496240679938,0.08579471066411419,0.1673430218306029,0.07375910671277595,0.0,0.0,0.08072648852453163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728687457562118,0.2638367525794415,0.0,0.1588845619301196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061444996841753835,0.0,0.15639456384959233,0.061570970692291074,0.14068006581953907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06391520494730105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05468924793080243,0.0,0.061704699703551726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210345613189014,0.0,0.07113611984585602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14852673211944475,0.0,0.12268109152508358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20983407429208492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06673298601246283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133012682690635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846733834956783,0.0,0.32932514931610524,0.0,0.0,0.09951349678844948
mentalhealth,MUNWTA,2020/04/05,"So mentally exhausted I just fall asleep I spend all day in my head. Fussing over negative things, past memories, and the future. Arguing with myself and feeling angry, sad, and hopeless. It just overwhelms me and I feel drained and I fall asleep.

I've been suffering like this for years. I haven't seen a therapist because I don't have the money and I feel I'd just be wasting their time. Maybe I'm just making too big of a deal of things. But I really want it to stop.",1.0260283687943286,3.5661907872340457,2.6543617021276624,89.9841666666667,87.93617021276596,6.5375886524822695,22.72695035460993,7.793537801064563,1.4042014184397154,370,14,75,8,12,121,66,94,0.306,0.639,0.055,-0.9766,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,1,0,6,7,1,1,4,0,5,4,3,1,1,19,12,8,0,1,5,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,3,0,2,2,3,6,0,0,2,4,12,1,7,9,1,11,0,4,1,0,3,3,0,0,7,48,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205084182037618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17144189322278214,0.2740647081116705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4032432199645403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728238970416069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298737881465908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17744724781220206,0.0,0.2670674713792144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26789963967311203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25377004652381896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703010162335538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22225036543882745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30865548270605897,0.3532185626037385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15501080676197798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15679665425216915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17118933400381406
mentalhealth,motail1990,2020/04/05,"My body is rotting from inside Note: I tried posting this to other threads but it was removed by moderators. So I'm posting it here hoping someone can help. 

My body is rotting away, my partner says he can't smell it, but he's always had a really bad sense of smell, so I don't know of I can believe him when he says that.

Its sort of like a smell of uncleaned, blocked drains, with a fishy tinge too.
I can smell it in my breath, my v*gina, when I go to the loo, my ears and behind my ears. I've also started looking really old, I'm in my 20s but I look about 60, and now I think the rotting smell is coming out of my belly button too.
I've stopped having s*x, because obviously I can't let my partner see me rotting away down there, and I've started using super powerful mouthwash whenever I can, using antiseptic (TCP) in my bellybutton and round my genitals to try and cover the smell, and hopefully stop whatever is happening.

What is there that can help to stop this? Has anyone else had this?  
I really want to ask for a whole body scan or xray, to find out what is rotting and maybe find out why, or have it removed before my whole body rots?

Addition: I do not have any physical issues, as far as I know, but I do have some mental health issues which I take medication for",5.91675274725275,5.153001873076928,6.856703296703298,78.98115384615387,66.80769230769229,9.89010989010989,32.032967032967036,9.23628265651192,2.588604395604396,997,35,205,16,14,335,138,260,0.06,0.8320000000000001,0.10800000000000001,0.9307,1,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,2,12,5,0,0,7,0,25,10,7,2,1,37,45,20,0,3,7,0,1,1,2,0,3,4,0,2,15,13,0,4,5,0,0,4,4,1,0,0,3,15,29,4,29,41,3,25,0,0,5,0,11,10,0,6,10,133,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495750055137133,0.08839749681048807,0.0,0.0,0.07224464148184682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428321443489241,0.10885211761284314,0.0,0.0,0.09931703198477694,0.0,0.1996258708499084,0.0,0.08870325913571482,0.06476094433736382,0.0,0.09039966014021238,0.119692451458685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4720203748861743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151356400743303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887471830258611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19419695248160987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037680032918592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394481818488352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129247106325516,0.0,0.0,0.1424165249947945,0.0,0.0,0.21103415199098294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217671576470361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167698926256063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863428736905366,0.0,0.051901915908383695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17842424809636098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672910707542577,0.0,0.0,0.10702236149712276,0.1070616693994164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147761124742232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20349090375286533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041739711254788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689674750680744,0.0,0.0,0.08465694515503112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001406407509402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15038985452368425,0.0,0.0,0.266456071134082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987682403643116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807222772742008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14425557628268698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18350890601098974,0.0,0.0,0.06266119499437746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586215404247088,0.2372191026905097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,4410b,2020/04/05,"vent, am i a failure? no matter how hard i try, no matter what ideas i use, i fail, i mess up or worse nobody cares, its like i am just doomed to fail, i am useless,pathetic, i offer nothing to anyone, everyone in my field gets success but i am left alone in the dust with no answer as to why?, is it my lack of budget?  i had similar ideas to ""i am sophie"" and yet she got a spotlight and love and im left with nothing, is that it? im just too poor? or am i just a failure? i dont know anymore, this is stressful",-0.7160029498525091,1.038270548672564,2.284269911504428,95.45761430678469,86.87610619469027,4.828613569321534,20.03613569321534,5.985473137389443,-0.1007103244837757,384,12,93,3,12,136,69,113,0.313,0.5760000000000001,0.11,-0.9742,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,6,9,0,1,4,0,11,1,0,2,0,20,17,8,0,1,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,4,0,2,0,4,5,0,0,2,1,16,4,11,15,1,6,1,3,0,1,3,5,0,2,2,64,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18458530780755167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17674935387008284,0.1246176851048672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18171025503987545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20887606153958985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17029974088253774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09311417627228667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425412365156162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15965282656315946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4023842105754553,0.385022907039876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794671528182933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3872796829012948,0.0,0.0,0.08707076911270747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16085324110736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3420196042326227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20415387647934133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100173717962423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15392747363712894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608185619970635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18162449160293628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yesiamdesigner,2020/04/05,"I’m a misfit (?) So I changed school and I’m in a new school since September. I had to start school 2 weeks later then other students. And my classmates are great and we’re all friendly with each other. But I don’t have that one person to talk to all the time like I had on schools(2) before (I’m introverted). And when we have make groups or pairs mostly In the one who is left out.
Probably bcs I came late and everyone has made their friends circles?
Now we have to make groups again to do online project. And everyone who I asked has their group already and I texted to group chat and no one replied. It makes me really anxious, 
anyone knows how to deal with this?",2.106905855338692,4.277758932835823,2.783731343283584,93.46373708381172,79.07462686567162,5.914121699196326,22.247990815155,7.010146845296331,0.5303864523536164,523,16,112,6,13,163,87,134,0.034,0.8640000000000001,0.102,0.8734,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,2,0,2,0,5,4,0,0,4,0,11,0,0,5,2,26,22,14,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,7,15,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,3,4,0,13,4,13,18,4,16,0,0,0,0,17,5,0,2,11,72,20,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895679175635614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17296672583218842,0.0,0.10705560048117632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313387725645058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302823251959171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511300834215673,0.0,0.0,0.16196633915628464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15784604290210075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925995777666189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23657935067766855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16880041857085942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414330928095133,0.0,0.17271076177241534,0.0,0.166350622595293,0.0,0.0,0.0748000852677907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487303948150812,0.30659926355361145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14787117830984484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112467100598087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368665995922066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650746652228085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980839222236517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4648557507200982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665125030296467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836954421527577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306117728519216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927761120001908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281277127082547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spirit55,2020/04/05,"Should I be worried about myself? Hello. Multiple times throughout the day, I feel very very sad for seemingly no reason. And in between the times that I feel sad, I just feel exhausted or empty. It's not a secret among my friends and family that I have ""dangerously low"" self esteem [as described by my mom], and I've been alerted many times that people are worried for me. I don't like talking about the fact that I feel this way because often times I feel like the people I care about hate me or are growing tired of me and my insecurities and I always feel like I'm doing stuff wrong. I sob in private over awkward or negative social interactions, or ones that I perceive as negative, but most of the time it's out of self hated I think. My friends and family are starting to get worried that I might actually hurt or off myself, but I think they might be overeating. I don't think I have depression or anything serious because I think compared to me, there are people who have it much worse mentally. I'm not on medication, I'm not in a hospital, and I'm not sad ALL the time, just most, I'm not starving myself or over eating (at least I don't think), and I can leave my bed most of the time. I don't like saying I have problems because I don't want to sound like I'm over exaggerating or looking for extra attention. I haven't attempted suicide at all. Sometimes I think that the quality of people's lives would be better if I was gone or that they'd be happier without me, but I wouldn't call those suicidal thoughts. I often just think that I'm being sensitive or irrational. However this has been going on for about a year or so now, and these feelings of sadness and exhaustion have been amplified over the past few months. My mom thinks I should get therapy. Is this something serious that I should start looking into, or am I right in saying that I'm just being sad? How/where do I get diagnosed and treated if it is serious? What should I do if it's not? I live in the US if that helps. Thanks in advance.",5.5818399339934,5.655303982673272,6.5136138613861405,78.34520627062706,67.34158415841584,9.802640264026405,32.42739273927393,9.621722640351123,2.8972313531353127,1595,63,315,31,24,532,176,404,0.21600000000000005,0.685,0.099,-0.9877,1,0,1,0,0,1,43.0,1,0,2,3,13,32,3,2,13,0,42,6,0,1,3,82,81,33,2,12,30,2,7,5,2,8,5,3,1,2,25,13,1,0,21,0,0,4,17,21,0,1,6,12,51,11,41,60,9,40,0,9,2,0,19,21,1,24,19,229,76,0,0.0,0.0,0.07615744917398089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06493695269144008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422167594580297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272050217793358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690215485686517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968930926329064,0.0,0.07956872232272255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050330445310105776,0.0,0.06721720858386676,0.079210690665345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985615022660877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714155318429534,0.0,0.2762216265290966,0.11150602331042844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058965973128982,0.0,0.12232071383906355,0.0,0.04435290102209878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410005888170633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05230971169858403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354526231101392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263490024112577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906361819929912,0.0,0.1378245155788308,0.0,0.13107075851342978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912204259217995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07861881021771536,0.07864768587012341,0.1655798383219494,0.0,0.18280300995122006,0.06229214661516621,0.0,0.05736963483668475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05288308094949135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449964071099519,0.21641717532101795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467537461436446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08023987346004212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664719205981816,0.0,0.12412379683567927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104623975156853,0.1628290430264005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955369309153858,0.0,0.060080319447470124,0.07718524454854761,0.0,0.11047664493728462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933908413109623,0.1707299233317919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272696857289174,0.0,0.07185031932026655,0.0892474942866611,0.0,0.0,0.4000478014451601,0.0,0.0619563986603185,0.3185472319446281,0.08969746273226692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387456547722907,0.0,0.0,0.12878516426941988,0.0460310212591474,0.06194587511961926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752294214070784,0.0,0.0,0.23776542755682545,0.07953116755126645,0.055438590104506136,0.08532635630118665,0.0,0.050256301133796914
mentalhealth,mech252,2020/04/05,"I need help with suppressing emotions. In past, every time I showed emotions, wanted to talk about some issue, I got told to just get over it, becouse Iam not a girl, I just have to deal with it... When I cried I got screamed at.... Now I keep suppressing emotions all the time, even when I want to cry, I can't, I just automatically suppress it, and opening myself about my personal issues is impossible for me outside of anonymous internet...",8.40921686746988,7.071964349397592,8.425391566265063,71.61471385542171,62.13253012048193,11.191566265060242,38.8222891566265,10.125756701596842,3.815725301204819,343,15,64,6,4,112,59,83,0.10300000000000001,0.846,0.051,-0.6124,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,17,11,3,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,4,0,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,13,0,13,8,2,10,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,6,45,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.380214754309854,0.0,0.17842579562104396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5840355565176054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430996563306582,0.0,0.14581748892012178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042103233081007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768370246387115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600401888439214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3612766361848117,0.0,0.15383103784314972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832793548855007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16521325481043805,0.0,0.15111654513846828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910572646278566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018350098188952,0.0,0.0,0.16537415668307415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20416030928186268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vaguebog,2020/04/05,"Inability to feel sad at all without crying So I've been having this issue for a few months now and it's seriously getting in the way and I have no idea what to do about it. Every time I feel the slightest bit upset or sad it turns into full on sobbing, which... really isn't practical if I'm around other people... It's like the feeling of sadness, no matter to which degree, triggers this intense crying reaction that I can't control or ease. I really don't know what to do, so if anyone has heard of this thing...or have any advice/info that'd be great... (Note: I don't have depression)",3.291666666666668,4.519578833333334,5.245000000000001,81.20666666666669,73.16666666666666,7.666666666666668,25.0,8.167268648758528,1.5437499999999995,460,14,90,7,9,159,81,120,0.204,0.703,0.094,-0.9277,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,0,1,4,0,14,0,0,2,1,18,22,8,0,2,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,14,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,7,7,0,0,2,4,5,2,14,18,4,10,0,5,0,0,1,6,1,4,4,64,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404333707630616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443960684174549,0.0,0.0,0.1838370140336428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254546143837771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23161768249103384,0.0,0.0,0.4536814260019171,0.0,0.0,0.17786611348568945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17399294887801006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132518434735103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789255920083632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22767717596557285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331238056278406,0.0,0.2155420030753568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134920825178096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088998783261682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16483371226724314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316751125521876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645902256472611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719556883611633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204172037431296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246227621910533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639174295708713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19906754665003695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cjj888,2020/04/05,"17 M Severe PTSD Need Someone To Talk Too *TRIGGER WARNING*

I was sexually abused, raped and beat over 3 years when I was younger by my teenage cousin, who was supposed to babysit me while my parents were at work, but instead he took advantage of how naive and scared I was, and I’m just really struggling rn. I’m really suicidal, I cut a lot, and there’s just a war of emotions going on. I feel like a bitch for not being over it yet, but I also sympathize for myself, but then I get mad because I’m feeling sorry for myself... I just need someone to talk to, I have a therapist but that’s fucked up because of this stupid coronavirus. It’s just so frustrating that my life got fucked up by my selfish cousin, and I have to relive it everyday bc I have like 50 flashbacks a fucking day, and he’s living a great life because I’m too much of a bitch to go on the stand and press charges. Ik I’m venting and ranting about something several other people have gone through, and a lot of people have it worse than me, especially on this sub, but please someone talk with me and help me out...",2.9002474747474736,4.522751277272729,4.08757575757576,87.52580808080809,74.86363636363637,7.070707070707071,28.131313131313128,7.793537801064563,1.6714191919191914,851,35,176,12,18,278,123,220,0.307,0.608,0.085,-0.9966,1,0,1,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,0,3,14,18,11,2,9,0,11,6,0,2,0,30,29,21,2,2,10,3,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,10,12,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,14,0,0,8,3,21,4,29,20,3,21,0,0,0,4,10,9,5,2,9,114,31,1,0.0,0.14813185232324316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998087576213084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286386447815901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062951455012274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406340865125887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264308058362354,0.0893164810438235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3467453432422241,0.06531937554893749,0.0,0.14210694367066992,0.0,0.0999923420032936,0.13783833724004851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380030485577364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766149337030759,0.12215987929435175,0.0,0.11039763025895233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21258022664642295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190631591473156,0.185405992290142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13882328466973642,0.0,0.0,0.17335046092805778,0.0,0.0,0.13723774850062598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14614523725634335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018591498474335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12516986828225418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824808858700309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31779483501970296,0.09624884026394943,0.0,0.13995305167498998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13070122138689555,0.0,0.13675490801447396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30146633875803697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14516137955548575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13890519185982025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101825835351446,0.0,0.1274091534806174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051073537172151
mentalhealth,chisea,2020/04/05,"I'm a 16-year-old girl with depression and social phobia I've been diagnosed in June 2019 after having to leave a party because I had a 'cry attack' (that's how I called it, I don't think it was a panic attack). I'm posting this here because I really wanna talk with someone who understands how I feel, not only with professionals who only studied it. If you feel uncomfortable with whatever thing I say or with this post itself, I'll delete it immediately!

(btw, if you're curious about any of these conditions \[or even more details about me, but nothing too personal\] you can ask whatever you want. I assure you I won't feel bad!).

Much love and thank you for reading this! Take care. ❤",3.309676616915421,5.46390820149254,4.879925373134332,79.96501243781096,75.19402985074628,8.048756218905472,26.092039800995025,8.841846274778883,2.1960218905472644,545,20,101,12,12,183,93,134,0.1,0.7340000000000001,0.16699999999999998,0.9182,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,5,0,0,7,9,2,1,4,0,7,2,0,2,1,23,20,9,0,4,6,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,2,13,7,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,3,4,14,4,13,16,2,5,0,1,0,1,15,1,0,4,2,66,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079509647505943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15231358222097205,0.3707031210705797,0.0,0.0,0.13603619523896746,0.19863604908267468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16636540620967805,0.0,0.16611365982692414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17896628518456956,0.0,0.0,0.1403277091207891,0.16536620596308474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10761092081268243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24714046262689846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17251484387058208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470468497746737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976917220065054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15633165056966522,0.0,0.1709631668124597,0.0,0.0,0.24782474809170515,0.0,0.19115826247092632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422604799355998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120756619542629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629698393055211,0.0,0.10437440694351292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295650951913059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16608228367152691,0.13804645865421322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12249988710182055,0.13095354575670876,0.0,0.1500001401758621,0.0,0.0,0.10824062829620837,0.10439624148770736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16961145088970128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609782818825452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049188408083182
mentalhealth,hydrooxy,2020/04/05,"Is my outlook on relationships healthy? I know my idea of a romantic relationship is far from normal, but I am sure I cannot overlook my ideals (I’ve tried for years.) I’ve been in many relationships but ended all of them because I never felt secure. Here’s the backstory: I grew up in a physically and verbally abusive home. I watched my mother get beat by my father and I myself was abused as well from a very young age. The only idea of love or relationships I ever had growing up is what I saw between my parents. I recognize that it was very dangerous and not a good situation and I have a lot of depression and issues stemming from my experiences. Well around age 16 I started having very odd sexual and romantic fantasies (I am a male) of being physically hurt by a woman and being absolutely controlled by a woman. Nothing that would seriously harm me but I want to be hit and told what to do everyday. I find women with extreme jealousy and intensity to be very attractive. I want them to dominate me in almost every sense and have a very tight grip on me. I don’t know why this is and I don’t know why I crave this to the point of ending every relationship I’ve been in (over 15) just because they couldn’t give me this love. I see a possessive, dominating, clingy girlfriend as being so attractive and loving. I don’t feel loved by really any other way. I don’t understand this and I’ve been struggling for very long. Can someone maybe give me some insight as to why this is and why I feel the need to have this kind of relationship with a romantic partner.",4.56991173874669,5.783320061488677,6.155688437775817,75.9458539276258,70.06796116504854,9.501676963812887,30.22668431891733,9.800150414767053,2.9532705501618124,1245,50,236,30,22,426,157,309,0.156,0.6779999999999999,0.166,0.3229,1,0,0,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,3,3,7,19,1,1,15,0,31,4,0,1,4,50,53,22,0,7,6,3,5,0,2,1,0,0,1,5,12,17,0,3,11,1,0,2,8,6,2,0,9,8,39,13,39,36,3,26,0,2,3,4,25,12,0,4,11,165,51,0,0.0,0.19084759177813407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064669627806655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05476827780676635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169547096286938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09818985374544363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032968097754283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936685107580122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426646822367516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285080096895175,0.13571267439912305,0.0,0.0,0.07878115203347234,0.0,0.0,0.08144438364195196,0.0,0.07732865263953953,0.0,0.0736098375227782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04207753202452266,0.1545178626181056,0.0,0.06755105373035265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807857028129652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621708474528669,0.18183412219789155,0.0,0.08406025034729908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386743739576158,0.13278395021987446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127317403016974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684701225273781,0.2907530378253537,0.0,0.0,0.08165240808024668,0.08091076744901306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05971755327239769,0.06211550319182551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890967340617873,0.0772779260164921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06125241586812344,0.0,0.0,0.08942738899982147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07613399184323863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05159439990817275,0.0,0.0,0.5188029602066033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417797909188824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905275509319047,0.0,0.0,0.06823918240385447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700487373822705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419530625229289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590566288359203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769570551727646,0.0,0.054679691911894916,0.0,0.0,0.08384240239031647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39871134931927005,0.09500623616544224,0.06392693753150229,0.0,0.0,0.1448258117931723,0.0,0.2906903530040945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05721154604082551,0.0,0.0,0.051863524680872235
mentalhealth,pepper2733,2020/04/05,"How do I deal with my toxic family while in quarantine? For context, I'm currently in high school, and my parents' work means that I don't see them for very long, at least on week days. I've always had a pretty unhealthy relationship with my family, especially my dad, and only realised the extent of it about a year ago. This quarantine means I'm constantly stuck in close quarters with them, and it's been exhausting. They're bigoted, and it hurts me to know that they are. They know about my mental health issues, but are constantly dismissive of them. My father always thinks the worst of me--he once said that I probably fail on purpose just to anger him-- and makes me keep my door unlocked so he knows I'm not ''wasting my time on the Internet''. They've also confiscated my phone for the duration of this quarantine, again to ensure I'm not ""wasting my time"", so I can't contact my friends or my therapist. I feel constantly threatened, and keep having suicidal thoughts. Please help me.",6.882422630560932,7.144634079787238,7.018007736943911,75.1877272727273,64.58510638297872,11.091682785299806,33.580270793036746,10.832165505486646,3.657706382978724,789,31,145,20,11,254,111,188,0.177,0.7509999999999999,0.07200000000000001,-0.9740000000000001,2,3,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,5,2,8,6,1,0,6,0,8,2,0,2,0,27,26,13,1,0,5,3,1,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,8,10,0,2,8,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,5,3,26,1,22,21,3,22,0,2,1,0,17,9,0,1,13,90,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188060186560576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718059458865314,0.22304084293458534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4345036831579868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643572328209055,0.1381749864424581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526956893779177,0.0,0.06776760475718334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354820422304464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246343819907867,0.0,0.0,0.08983484524101545,0.14160589466887016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14347767300986938,0.0,0.0,0.13988838926865793,0.0,0.23825704679553106,0.0,0.0,0.2209716583075192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860884867642485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946343814071855,0.0,0.0,0.29198734855844144,0.0,0.0,0.13506674877922878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273338352991247,0.0,0.10193286076599324,0.0,0.0,0.14882008264312382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14712037049265836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635268985723253,0.144502764908092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389383438519435,0.0,0.0,0.12748947808388714,0.0,0.0,0.13564153160998332,0.10680142022644257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466027601996622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15561458982497847,0.0,0.08587848977957385,0.0,0.10640172359219924,0.15630335091553316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058553876330443,0.0,0.0,0.10750762384225196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757257049801037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630839070104691
mentalhealth,evalame,2020/04/05,anyone else lose 35 pounds without actively trying or just me Started on Prozac over a year ago. Started losing a little weight but it continued ever since. Switched to Wellbutrin and started lamotrigine a couple months ago and I’m still losing weight. Got my bloodwork done 3x & everything is fine. I’m 110 now at 5’7”. Therapist says it could be disordered eating but? Idk if that’s the case? I told psychiatrist but she isn’t too worried ?? I’m freaking out bc I look like skeletor and my weight. won’t. stop. going down. for MONTHS. Has anyone else experienced something similar and what they did that helped bc I’m goin batshit,1.6564729620661822,4.246919966101694,2.6014285714285705,86.419802259887,99.33898305084743,5.298466505246167,23.415657788539143,6.868970318607317,1.409928490718321,508,21,88,9,21,160,88,118,0.166,0.79,0.044000000000000004,-0.9176,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,3,5,6,0,0,4,0,8,5,0,0,1,15,19,9,0,2,7,0,3,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,5,5,4,1,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,4,6,7,2,8,12,0,20,0,3,1,0,5,6,0,2,14,46,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22242778912580147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593729304134394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754509508912202,0.25709990725341353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017065899969108,0.1388205696171962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14378954772014654,0.0,0.0,0.1283904945476196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12837825676010675,0.2096136761078363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134869511094999,0.0,0.0,0.11275654896861408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713025621609959,0.0,0.1003428825805496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409408142555737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061294066017993115,0.1257452073571503,0.0,0.0,0.10535591461916136,0.4210773921784214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002840650245964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977188115750504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378290438492403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658625734360173,0.0,0.0,0.2664065143919505,0.0,0.10019357607809057,0.10489128534816036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567026806399752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988367240663285,0.0,0.08518000406519109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4583342825133512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094024004295302,0.0,0.0,0.1274120654073966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079297978251425
mentalhealth,ilovesharks12345,2020/04/05,"Why do people have therapy ? For people who have had therapy, what motivated you to go? 

For me it was a breakup from a toxic relationship",2.4679487179487194,5.20927553846154,5.490000000000002,71.13833333333336,82.07692307692307,9.620512820512822,27.89743589743589,9.725611199111238,3.6556051282051287,108,5,19,4,3,39,21,26,0.0,0.873,0.127,0.5204,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,1,0,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,16,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18493841934802024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4511976601450556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3493693469798824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7442710688043981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2936325732276517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fuckingshiteater6767,2020/04/05,"The worst thing that ever happened to me This is long, I will sound stupid throughout the story, and I don’t expect anyone to read it, but this drags me down every day.


Last year, my best friend had set me up to get robbed. I ended up being dragged around for a day, threatened in order to keep me subservient and drained of all my money. My friend, I’m assuming had been tricked into this as some form of fraud. Because they (my best friend and the two guys who had been orchestrating this) kept my bank card and tried to use fake checks to repeat this. I ended up getting fined an extra 1000$ by the bank for the fake checks. 

I was left in debt and completely mentally drained. As someone who was already mentally ill, I just shut down. I was convinced if I go to the bank they’ll have me arrested. So I avoided everything and everyone. 

Two months later one of the guys reached out to me and apologized. Said I was supposed to be reimbursed, that he had every intention of paying me back. Being dumb and naive I agreed to speak to him. He offered to meet in public and pay back cash so I agreed and met him. 

Next thing I know we’re at a train station and he’s saying he has half of the money and had to get the other half in a city a half hour train ride away. I was alone with two older men who could easily over power me so I bit my tongue and prayed for the best. Well the best was not the best, because again I was dumb and had fallen for a lie. We ended up in a different province. We took buses and metros and one of the guys told me he was going to go get my money and meet us back at Tim hortons. It was already late, I was empty handed, and had no money or anything. Just a phone at 4%. I begged the workers to let me charge my phone and they refused. The second man who was staying at the tim hortons decided to leave and find his friend. Leaving me alone. The tim hortons closed and I had no where to go so I hid in a gas station restroom, and eventually got kicked out for being inside for two long. So there I was, sitting outside in the middle of winter with nothing but a coat and leggings, in -20 weather. I waited outside the whole night and the men returned in the morning and met at the tim hortons. We took the buses and metros back to the train station we arrived at. 

So we’re back at the train station no one is telling me what’s going on, I have been begging for my money or even just enough to get food. They never replied. 

So we’re back at the train station confirming the tickets, and the lady helping us informs me that our train is delayed till 8pm. I check the board with all the train times, and notice theirs one leaving to my city in an hour. When I ask the men about it they tell me that they’re not taking me home, but to another province. 

There is a certain level of fear I never thought I’d reach, but in that moment I did. I almost threw up. I waited 20 minutes and excused myself saying I was going to use the bathroom. I ran to the front desk and begged for them to change my ticket. The woman, realizing I’m in a crazy state of fear takes me to security, I instantly lose it and explain the situation. 

They tell me that the only explanation is human trafficking, and at the time when this happened, there was a huge increase in human trafficking so it lined up very well.

Having no money, I couldn’t get a ticket home, and despite the circumstances, one wouldn’t be provided. So I have a close friend of mine buy me a ticket. 

Security tells me I have to leave the office cause I can’t stay there, but to avoid anywhere those men might be. So I go to get myself a drink and spot them out of the corner of my eye. However the train station is very crowded so I easily slip away and speed walk in random directions. They caught up to me quickly, pretending to just bump into me by chance. Again I feel my stomach fall and explode. I quickly explain I bought myself a ticket home, and thankfully I was surrounded by enough people that they couldn’t do anything so I slip away again without saying another word. 

I got home at 1am after another 8 hour train ride. Emotionally, I was broken. I couldn’t leave my bed for a week. 
But there was this guy I was talking to for about a month, and he seemed great. Was in med school, wanted to open a residency for sick children, overall very wholesome. He told me I had to leave the house at some point and get some air or do anything. Just move. 
I agreed only to shut him up, but told him blatantly, I don’t want to be touched, I don’t want to have sex. We’re just going to watch a show.

I was still so emotionally detached and physically weak that I couldn’t stop him from using me. I just layed there and let him have his way with me. He was confused as to why I was crying after so I know he hadn’t realized what he did. 

It’s been a year since then, I’ve been forced to mature and lose my childlike sense of wonder and trust. The world is dark and bleak, and I can’t help but hate myself for being dumb enough to trust these people.

No one knows the full story of what happened to me, my friends are aware, my family has no idea, and charges were never pressed because I fear that this will come back to me. I also know that if this goes to court I could not handle a lawyer tearing my story to shreds and making me look bad. 

I’m sorry if the story is choppy, I have very bad adhd, and this is also a very hard thing to share but I hope some young girl out there can learn from my mistakes. 
Speak up before it’s too late, staying quiet and subservient could be the death of you.",3.406046666878596,4.4934517625329855,4.365019126638483,88.16660679657946,72.71152154793316,6.9570906316559125,25.04444161871761,7.1928832394048134,0.9587103220268944,4342,129,919,42,83,1408,427,1137,0.153,0.736,0.111,-0.9917,4,4,1,0,0,0,114.0,7,1,11,9,54,45,6,6,72,0,91,10,4,6,8,158,156,87,1,17,26,0,5,0,6,5,3,8,5,14,40,68,2,11,18,9,19,22,24,21,2,14,56,16,140,24,139,77,21,150,1,2,3,1,94,65,3,18,55,642,180,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053402282394292254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044495273391215104,0.0920425999480073,0.09807034198311487,0.07106937000473097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13978203970937336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03107001275668372,0.0,0.10969875409497652,0.03955660589499449,0.0415407636058561,0.0,0.12524454685466652,0.23917461773505275,0.07420280379281817,0.08126156287139512,0.0,0.03781094578530996,0.0,0.2331591624468831,0.0,0.04851155451619207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04564702572055223,0.04700637987289565,0.03827685194765837,0.04658929346199107,0.0,0.0,0.10643328989064693,0.0,0.048809804338294856,0.05731384886543413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04642515871983498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043529422074772235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999668771997912,0.1180687678297653,0.13773982199139456,0.0,0.029348924486608488,0.040194037145748526,0.07487687442547163,0.042459584425980634,0.03993534827892214,0.0,0.041889400585815216,0.15000531920706586,0.0224676910746141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04061282105798696,0.0,0.053731026095196484,0.0,0.2059824075663065,0.0,0.1857237930345762,0.0,0.2020276554488356,0.0,0.07107752054881802,0.04898978787431416,0.0,0.1759907005301069,0.1178812759369878,0.0,0.03980506742509083,0.0438704020522904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059567740599447826,0.0,0.17828787036088214,0.04413402034589315,0.13127868933358058,0.05127206957444514,0.0,0.050161750898946866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03949590473894123,0.0,0.0,0.0976813424425534,0.036220487825757625,0.10024931993032984,0.2823017452507508,0.048278800388652406,0.09087567682812353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864722326621973,0.03731424189588965,0.09942288622606604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029660733883403925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04935731167766778,0.0,0.08956013708607735,0.0471385548561883,0.0,0.0,0.07093524912421638,0.04722741477261883,0.0,0.0,0.10281312529493608,0.0,0.04725716857042941,0.04169927442125105,0.0,0.04263661878168069,0.050589586938869384,0.0,0.0,0.1806619963564532,0.0675896996580576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061611322936886787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04200547496389841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04444706421291734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04226789804827707,0.10600958061187014,0.0,0.04497063220723569,0.0,0.040451991061175835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03675712382048578,0.04994684610840973,0.0,0.0,0.03764966473745419,0.0,0.0,0.04974138872540476,0.0,0.142085519383262,0.035485879911977304,0.03714968265806505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681923933032048,0.03571520154871046,0.1553527321673541,0.04090981429910066,0.0,0.0,0.08856199730262182,0.0,0.0,0.035276457889307486,0.05182085769270093,0.0,0.0,0.12737875327794193,0.09873792763478503,0.030168475000864687,0.0,0.17362630755532266,0.0,0.1068997626569758,0.1151328216091915,0.0,0.18331780584220225,0.07862681263735917,0.03527046604264838,0.035643108374691354,0.0,0.07990487381681445,0.0,0.04009571168454597,0.04961013469054434,0.0,0.042833792371529136,0.04818790482268219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722941710471681
mentalhealth,XeniaSynology,2020/04/05,"I'm dissatisfied all the time So I'm a productivity addict and I have/had depression and anxiety. All fucking day I think about what I didn't do yet, what I did wrong, blah blah blah. I'm so sick and tired of this bullshit. I constantly berate myself yet I still don't get more than half of the things done I wanted to accomplish that day. I want my head to shut up. I do practice meditation so I can give myself a pat on the back for that but otherwise I'm helpless.",1.1565306122449002,3.2595262857142906,3.52383673469388,87.25330612244898,82.06122448979592,7.185306122448982,22.044897959183675,8.238735603445708,1.2285600000000003,368,12,81,8,10,127,61,98,0.24100000000000002,0.725,0.034,-0.9309999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,8,4,1,0,5,0,7,5,1,0,2,9,17,7,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,3,0,13,0,9,14,3,11,0,2,0,1,1,3,1,0,8,55,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27404573467281124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923081203521569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932988276615935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716568665971807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3242438486810615,0.0,0.21651672535921815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572531754332576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324005157673024,0.13133779757699704,0.24115049987651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579925732445804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200755637673337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700840152208696,0.16107675731577886,0.0,0.0,0.14658406888434042,0.2889290006678781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965456673356493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27484901028158776,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gmobxelitex,2020/04/05,"What can I do to remain positive? Is this the end for me? I (22m) am currently homeless in mexico without any way of getting back home, sleeping on the beach at night, relying on locals for food and water, trying to do some work but it's very difficult to encounter. I am trying to stay positive but I am struggling because I just don't see a way out of this for me, the few family that I have said they will not help me get back home because it would upset my father who I have never met in my entire life. I feel like I'm just going to end up dying on the beach or starvation or thirst or something like that",5.264966517857143,4.492773867187502,6.66017857142857,79.88125000000002,68.140625,9.814285714285717,30.004464285714285,9.23628265651192,2.356980803571428,477,15,100,8,7,164,83,128,0.102,0.794,0.10400000000000001,0.0985,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,4,5,0,2,5,0,12,5,2,0,1,15,20,6,1,1,9,1,1,2,0,2,1,1,2,0,8,2,3,0,1,2,0,1,4,3,0,0,2,3,14,2,19,16,2,20,0,0,1,0,6,9,0,4,9,72,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186752765832584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683804727223484,0.0,0.21276382091150176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18111763219904697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091346177224045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16451595211937253,0.0,0.08823935261359943,0.12467259720293628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21102261652785287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823523744372408,0.0,0.09918013753419676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11697283111322955,0.0,0.35010287010036684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232641626285251,0.17051712346516848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345956969362188,0.0,0.0,0.16376925279809673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600245871867594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390647967087154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17463969676226587,0.0,0.0,0.13434914534518524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860083471937479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18243957372105926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369666464235539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399205024087475,0.0,0.2770416487967213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16822494560287088,0.0,0.1270480266262708,0.0,0.0,0.12396950063147627,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,azaeliaa,2020/04/05,"Struggling to seek professional help I believe I've struggled with mental health since I was 14, for six years now. When I was younger, I felt very invalidated by my friends who had been diagnosed by a doctor. They told me that if I hadn't seen a doctor, I was fine. In reality, I find it extremely difficult to talk about my mental health out loud. I choke up and struggle to get my point across. I went to the doctors once about how I was struggling to sleep, but he came across disinterested. I've tried to self-refer myself online twice, but each time it reaches the stage where they set up a phone interview, I put it off. 

Has anyone got any tips to help me? I think I'm afraid of being invalidated again, and I can feel the lack of professional help taking a toll mentally.",5.121568627450984,5.8616516470588245,5.87896078431373,80.16432352941176,68.47712418300654,8.995816993464052,28.3718954248366,9.120678840339163,2.098192679738564,614,20,125,11,10,201,101,153,0.098,0.809,0.094,0.1163,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,2,0,7,8,0,5,7,0,10,7,1,1,0,15,21,7,0,2,3,0,2,0,1,0,6,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,6,0,2,13,4,21,2,22,7,2,19,0,0,1,0,12,9,0,1,5,79,26,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513539548456411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08753771503410858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410494118655518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318720883468875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706805438468347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38442039997781663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330124014322673,0.0,0.12020471865088175,0.0,0.11442394904522625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096723644954089,0.0,0.06540806965961553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012811690582543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661481793662983,0.0,0.0,0.2517422800557967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3784946832844592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332624370679927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11834765972122492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258533401780546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060339154280812,0.0,0.0,0.10356077596971563,0.0,0.1252832104480412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5235147777348863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412940343957897,0.10062522857780996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021848970688626,0.0,0.0,0.07300092711662813,0.0,0.0,0.11962708322830075,0.0,0.08499769177182658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329716935852046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605497772714515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806200571160557
mentalhealth,thinking_on,2020/04/05,"Lonely Idk what's wrong with me.  I constantly feel like no matter where I go or whay I do I feel like I am alone.  In a group of people I feel alone.  With my family I feel alone.  I don't even know what kind of loneliness I feel.  Almost like I am just not even happy.  Constantly confusedn but what I am feeling, even writing this idk if it is really how I feel or am I just misunderstanding something.  Why doesn't life feel as joyous as they make it out to be.  Why can't I just be ignorant to the stupidity and unfairness of the world.  Is happiness even a real thing or it something people use as an excuse for whatever vice they have that lets them cope.  What is it? Idk, I just feel like life isn't as fulfilling as childhood stories made it out to be.  Why can't I find someone that understands how I feel? That doesn't just listen to what I say, but truly empathizes with it.  Cares about it.  Whenever I do it just ends up backfiring on me and every single time, and I feel like the biggest idiot in the world.  Like, it was a ""hey you deserve it"" kind of feeling, but for what? Why can't people just be open about how they feel and what they want? 
Idk, it just feels a little disappointing and unrewarding (the fact that when I do say, ""let me face life head on"" it seems to really hit back hard and in wtf ways). Looking for some advice.  Sorry if it sounds whiney or complainer-ish.  Just one of those days for me(good and bad days).  I am ok though, just wondering how other people think of it.  Thanks 😊",1.996932773109244,3.91600082679739,3.5185480859010285,89.30132352941179,78.31372549019608,6.9858076563958935,21.0592903828198,7.957251820313856,0.8379760971055079,1167,31,252,20,28,385,143,306,0.159,0.6920000000000001,0.149,0.3355,0,5,2,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,5,0,24,20,2,0,10,1,26,5,2,7,1,68,55,27,0,3,20,0,15,6,0,0,3,4,0,0,29,13,0,1,20,0,0,1,9,7,0,1,2,20,32,13,33,46,2,25,0,2,1,0,13,14,0,10,15,173,61,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698529431997525,0.0,0.0,0.07888923944788882,0.24478456316682146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06057883793139863,0.06578005156466897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08032395414923316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17027167203882584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161632016667264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977786318069551,0.0,0.0,0.20814024995465585,0.0,0.06637760851275919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426907851734554,0.0,0.5576868049825082,0.22512878031202035,0.0,0.0,0.07200572826978871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04477387953566727,0.0660789777961473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16773075718534808,0.07057359705890315,0.0,0.0808535182088599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640795880288149,0.04329677191658322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16112077717221596,0.1669391141958708,0.23093474161090616,0.07896070766270923,0.0,0.0,0.06615741267301595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454585517131558,0.05258789438048359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053385024233876435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218471313352078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967167108360741,0.10094010434083847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530192611890986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172057986723185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06675211073525328,0.12130115160066444,0.0,0.08819049814859026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253229141070087,0.0,0.0,0.05233955638210335,0.05048061022403488,0.07740335307657631,0.0,0.04593867774415774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08201530457305045,0.0,0.0680427383254886,0.0,0.0,0.04646792776269405,0.06253383851837335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843556143237604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543620192249902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613623709401216,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imnotcrauzy,2020/04/05,"In need of some advice So I wanted to talk to one of my doctors about this but I won’t be able to talk with either of them for a few days because they are really backed up. I have tried calling pharmacies but they are closed or won’t talk to beacuse I haven’t filled any prescriptions there so im really sorry to ask my mind is scattered 

Would it be ok to take 3-4 0.5mg clonazepam to make me sleep?

In the past 4 days I have only slept about 5 hours a day I have tried napping but  I wake up every 5 mins 
I’m super irritable and I just don’t want anyone in my room I want to be alone I keep getting the sensation that bugs are crawling on me and even heard a bug near my ear but I look and no bugs I was in the bathroom this morning and herd a whispery hi it really freaked me out but other wise I just feel nauseous and headache and I don’t want to go to the hospital because 1. They are probably overworked 2.i don’t want to risk catching anything and bringing it home to my family
 
I’m sorry to ask I just don’t really have other options right now",0.27605263157894555,2.3596974473684256,2.509782456140353,93.3124105263158,85.49122807017544,5.577824561403509,20.96210526315789,6.918507183188421,0.4373640000000001,830,27,187,11,25,281,125,228,0.091,0.8190000000000001,0.09,-0.3005,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,4,1,11,5,0,1,8,1,21,5,4,1,0,33,41,15,0,7,10,0,1,0,0,3,1,2,2,0,8,10,0,1,1,1,0,4,8,2,0,1,3,4,27,3,29,32,3,24,0,0,1,0,12,12,0,3,8,120,35,1,0.1296964460140704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267378659946921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343264036690024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819803077020888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068677064561136,0.0,0.1067291242161937,0.0,0.2424973385797817,0.0,0.0,0.09972856130098168,0.0,0.15812349938257556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13243457231234484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509304344794046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13274980820437882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856632793959791,0.0,0.109274849528703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12226626661396432,0.0,0.06557842004688819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776104001895061,0.0,0.0737094791255675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300961101539435,0.0,0.12772487396431104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009441771707265,0.0,0.0,0.11528016040903555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089123497672034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657338482380039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095643817348046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616827134173296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08788566838953922,0.09863999153938977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380993317919227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13983470493067873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33234745753566763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076005624667466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297901112362873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903691058166437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751558648072096,0.3127352714761547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761107466904879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3824916208907237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213263407556972,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MisterMaster____,2020/04/05,"""All You Need Is Love"" and it's what i never got.

i have a complicated relation with my father, he was addicted to drugs until about 6 months ago. yesterday he told me to go to his house to spend the evening with him. actually, i spent the evening guarding his house while he was out of the town buying a new car.

my only way to not feel bad, and not ashame myself for everything bad in my social life is by putting my 5$ headphones that my mother bought and... nevermind. she told me that if i broke the headphones, she would not get new ones for me, but yesterday, when i was at my father's house, she used them and... wow, broke them. she said it's my fault, that i should watch my stuff better and that i'm ungrateful.

just laid in bed, and even thought about cutting my wrists. but instead i just hid under my pillow and played All You Need Is Love quietly on my phone.

*""there's nothing you can do that can't be done, nothing you can sing that can't be sung, nothing you can say but you can learn how to play the game, it's easy, all you need is love.""*",2.9909862385321087,4.009664279816517,3.797144495412845,92.10654243119266,73.63302752293578,7.2848623853211025,23.716743119266056,7.645422480735847,0.7796137614678895,815,22,188,10,16,260,121,218,0.071,0.794,0.135,0.9505,0,0,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,7,2,1,11,14,1,1,7,0,20,7,1,2,4,34,38,15,0,6,9,3,1,0,0,2,3,3,2,0,11,10,0,1,3,4,4,3,6,7,0,1,11,5,38,7,21,23,3,21,0,2,1,3,32,7,0,1,10,126,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.12083283164945904,0.13498472733068614,0.0,0.0,0.10976111460297594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20677311665344708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951087843459742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671333776557633,0.0,0.0,0.1435947096456531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24535064484086494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128361741329272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06260834186907686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06469210993307498,0.0,0.07037114137220048,0.0,0.09903210995176027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4286233840751377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745944530947057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352637366316638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09883388357504716,0.0,0.0,0.2754382922682385,0.09549949266729672,0.2391769520679113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3564328879135815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390528420767727,0.09417253889077204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447574375169608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11778348751126708,0.09846856748362197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622137569842326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14174705993458803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983011795973695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366352793914215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694282487270827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09828448275109304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795990277560131,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayanswers69,2020/04/05,"Is it possible I have gender dysphoria? I always wanted to become a woman, but I was able to suppress these feelings, but now when I'm bored out of my mind I can't think of anything else but how much I hate my current body... I didn't choose to become a man, but I'm pretty sure my parents wouldn't support me in my transition... 

oh wait, our government banned changing sex a few days ago...",3.0757916666666683,4.250085662500002,4.655000000000001,85.4366666666667,73.625,7.333333333333335,27.083333333333336,7.793537801064563,1.5709583333333337,303,11,62,4,6,102,58,80,0.17800000000000002,0.733,0.08900000000000001,-0.8093,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,3,0,6,2,1,1,1,16,14,6,0,2,4,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,1,12,2,7,11,2,7,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,5,39,14,1,0.2194508837792176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945299675616288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18260071514807466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805893789231868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4847325195076973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24376046021829034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23214993688963914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152766531894614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18332305407517605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096096060005456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166623146751788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215828342021877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16132164992003745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24367423617565784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24739789835987916,0.0,0.22326044282030025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2490302623020265,0.20682986086738134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14061526528740706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943781702932486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Timewave94,2020/04/05,"Feeling rage + what time do about it I've never discussed this with anyone, but I thought it'd help me and maybe someone else. In fact I don't see many people talk about this... I feel like being evil. Like hurting good people level evil. My life has been shit and so disappointing that I want to take it out on others. I'm totally alone, and when I see a happy couple sometimes I just wish I could tear them apart. Bad news sometimes gives me a strange satisfied feeling, like I know people who don't deserve it now have to suffer as much as I do. A popular doctor I listen to has referred to it as ""extracting revenge on existence itself."" Pretentious I know but this pretty well sums up the desire. 

I think I understand how horrible and pathetic this sounds to other people, but I just can't shake it. I realize what a piece of shit loser I am for being this way. I agree with everyone else when a mass shooting occurs, that this is a tragedy and something must be done, but I see myself in those awful people. It makes me feel incredibly sad to think that I could possibly ever perform such an action... 

I've struggled for a long time with many things, but this feeling is new to me. I'm mid twenties and have only felt this for a few years. I've been violent and prone to violence as a rowdy but this is a totally different thing. I realize I haven't dealt with many of my issues, but for the past couple months especially I've felt hopeless because I don't know what to do. I want to add a disclaimer that I am not considering hurting anyone, it's just a sort of fantasy I have. I do notice some regression further into the negative emotion regardless of what I do or don't do, so this is my main motivation for posting this. I believe that I would commit suicide before I picked up a weapon to harm someone else... Any help would be seriously appreciated. Thanks.",3.7256616961789386,5.320139527027031,5.172348555452004,80.70391891891893,72.64864864864866,8.130475302889097,28.164026095060574,8.74248658614541,2.2372143522833183,1475,57,281,28,29,495,187,370,0.27,0.5660000000000001,0.165,-0.9962,1,1,1,1,0,3,41.0,0,0,1,3,14,27,7,2,17,1,36,4,2,4,7,66,63,24,1,10,12,0,7,3,0,3,2,2,0,0,35,14,0,0,18,1,0,2,9,19,1,0,6,12,39,8,38,47,7,29,0,7,3,0,8,13,2,3,15,201,74,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410831187037502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06179103705127425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706926801173324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586813719881194,0.05539021066401259,0.0,0.07731907356132496,0.1023732771197965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450959627256217,0.20107988103371047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09493415696440197,0.0,0.09300375808477812,0.0,0.09298602303925643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277171162621852,0.10221043366375597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219222371332921,0.0,0.0868250096217151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297193342920993,0.1298273624437794,0.1744885116612003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871655943592541,0.0,0.07621290701584113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672704563090924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218092386115349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945448457132491,0.0,0.0,0.09483902455497026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981040698046466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641803470727952,0.133175546717866,0.0,0.0,0.0804123027712958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06065281937234125,0.2763672973694795,0.09128569364420164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252724880604619,0.0,0.06679592863314825,0.0,0.07008037340021027,0.08775758719492828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344993791409393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06910661517860754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08674053265796221,0.31497032879156833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243617252258706,0.08702315988757503,0.0924419543974522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21722194175619144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18654239166612227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15397854441003792,0.06995200059219815,0.17973480574082784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499139824214203,0.0,0.0993911134947731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831886341097611,0.07303351551907376,0.0,0.08365590639103286,0.0,0.0,0.12073279208723445,0.11644472058802345,0.0,0.07213633475378534,0.10596774623684677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459324265857852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718857875563284,0.0721240821104573,0.0,0.0,0.08169817877117166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044897941479139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909519534801148,0.0,0.0,0.05851381682061085
mentalhealth,elenov,2020/04/05,"does anyone feel empty/depressed for no reason??? i dont have any reason to feel the way i do i just,, do???? and it sucks so bad bc how am i supposed to get better if i dont even know why i feel like shit in the first place. i get self deprecating thoughts a lot and i always feel worthless or i always think theres no point to life & all that stuff,, but nothing ""triggered"" those thoughts i guess u could say?? it just crosses my mind alot. ive been meaning to get professional help but its so much effort to put in so ive been delaying it alot,, life sux

​",1.3546371275783071,3.15545237815126,2.8089228418640206,94.19236058059592,79.84033613445379,5.335676088617267,21.742551566080976,6.1124844417494595,0.09060672268907588,439,13,100,3,11,143,78,119,0.141,0.795,0.063,-0.7849,0,0,0,0,0,1,26.0,0,0,0,3,8,6,2,0,5,0,11,3,1,4,1,29,25,10,0,2,6,0,4,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,7,2,0,1,11,0,0,2,4,4,0,1,4,5,13,2,8,20,5,9,0,1,0,0,3,4,2,6,3,62,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22863330817494745,0.2977166397870324,0.1669397524433444,0.09342759679789894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960639026607788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471206942418695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215072799888932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969201804530004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833087423919675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022793641719705,0.0,0.3220321357601964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907425512554258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778671647554932,0.09814901198103436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11686096878736868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21533647872448364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513468251316301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09208733963968052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550408045903569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940804322054236,0.0671201513782219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680117134156627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965427983458415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387212979350734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099495632191068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182614466571208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14353975208182226,0.0,0.1298747409520671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381114759014184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825126057867339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925533582020584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14332418303867442,0.0,0.14102536699486268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15727478352171734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803178360086698,0.0,0.21813922275693348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090510854712286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239700342108902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669397524433444,0.0
mentalhealth,Zackappleton1,2020/04/05,"Stop trying to be cool and be yourself Are you one of these people who try to be cool?

It’s time to be yourself

Stop trying to just fit in and doing this because it’s what most people do.

Do what you love

Do things that bring you fulfilment

Stop caring about judgement 🙂",5.98636904761905,5.188591089285719,6.018571428571431,85.15976190476194,66.67857142857143,8.180952380952384,27.595238095238088,6.42735559955562,1.121959523809524,215,5,45,1,3,68,36,56,0.1,0.6809999999999999,0.21899999999999997,0.836,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,9,1,0,0,0,7,12,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,4,7,8,1,7,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,1,4,33,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322312156295562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562722487732792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22685688164384346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032403790547376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34851455806800113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6304298276733084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698848999536606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656659244256953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5119587876703615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,batness,2020/04/05,"Man, 34, takes his own life ‘after being unable to cope with coronavirus self-isolation’ Are we counting the cost of forcing single people who live alone into solitary confinement? People with families seem remarkably callous about this.",12.115789473684213,12.660157421052627,10.141052631578948,56.19736842105266,53.73684210526316,12.86315789473684,42.6842105263158,12.161744961471696,6.026536842105264,194,9,22,5,2,59,36,38,0.053,0.9470000000000001,0.0,-0.25,0,2,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,7,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3745825685238031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409516739905361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554592551653745,0.0,0.0,0.3193625341488686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5014749172423436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292521228682484,0.3773022208389579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27193193487903033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Say415,2020/04/05,"Sometimes I just feel like weak loser who can't do anything I don't have the willpower and self-discipline to be better. Heck, my mind is just a random mess and can't really figure out what my life is really about. There are people I love and care for but at the same time I find them inconsiderate and makes me feel like they're leeching my life. I hate that part yet I still know deep down I'd cry a river when the day comes that they die. My grandma right now is alone, lonely and hurting. The last time I talked to her via video call, I got mad because I just felt like she was putting all the weight on me. It annoyed me that she antagonizes others and gossips about them. It triggered everything else that I've been feeling--deep rooted anger and bitterness coming from my childhood. I got disappointed in myself. I haven't talked to her for days. I've ignored her messages and calls. I love her but at the same time I don't wanna hear her mess because I already have my own. Then again,  haven't really done much to ""improve"" my life because I ultimately see no point.

I'm just so confused. I have all these thoughts and feelings that seem to contradict each other. It's like there are different me's in my head arguing and judging each other. Sometimes I'm really happy and hopeful about life but then I fall down very hard and feel like I don't deserve life. My basic physical needs are met. I have food and shelter provided. But my life ultimately feels pointless and meaningless. There is a hole I just can't figure out. I always feel like I'm out of place or that I'm not supposed to feel normal or satisfied about life.

I just wanna say sorry to everyone for letting them down, including myself.",3.7389338154722793,5.4420990976331405,4.513523997370153,84.99970962086347,72.81656804733728,7.492614507999124,26.423843962305497,8.167268648758528,1.6407294323909705,1357,47,267,21,27,436,171,338,0.22399999999999998,0.6609999999999999,0.11599999999999999,-0.9909,2,3,0,0,0,1,33.0,0,0,4,2,19,28,6,1,9,0,25,13,1,3,2,64,54,24,1,5,13,0,10,6,0,0,8,2,0,0,15,21,2,1,14,1,0,4,10,16,0,0,8,14,49,12,29,44,9,33,0,4,1,2,24,15,1,6,20,175,64,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101087948300404,0.0969710555777873,0.0,0.07311814067265021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231274861867007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607013776070373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771734102872506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794581939348591,0.0,0.08959331768432033,0.0,0.0,0.15139120196799888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652537461416492,0.11334281723344695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119925520739106,0.09180954313800238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992552908701837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07340738422376282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396729608407852,0.0789754129365717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110218590230376,0.2511085833362321,0.08437274343970741,0.0,0.08031517068968415,0.0,0.10625749257866203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14056160213364918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354342159263553,0.07871777190744647,0.08675730316847433,0.0901839932994698,0.0,0.09904029405064883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727862987506775,0.0,0.0,0.09407084855393004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048293208198155316,0.07162897297963626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985703659406279,0.43447563786560794,0.2575845510674461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15861928681924714,0.0,0.058656523791478836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872760891818951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459744192585493,0.06515739805510043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609778396431486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515889184831572,0.0,0.06092071160272392,0.0,0.09180954313800238,0.0,0.08306925753347254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833756029755767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22517713255239488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504384733947163,0.0,0.06988086799344838,0.0,0.0,0.07002413697338976,0.07999711623521856,0.09167166289870243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738191071444457,0.09836765882672303,0.0,0.0,0.07017622583111834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412594561951532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976207667676902,0.15371996782491193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250518670275613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700676089496954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_im_lost_,2020/04/05,"I need help The past 6 years I have isolated myself because of some experiences I went through with family. And over them years I have gotten extreme anxiety and depression to the point i havent left my house in 2 years and struggle to talk to my mum or brother without feeling extremely nervous. 

No one knows I feel this way my family thinks I'm just extremely lazy. Has anyone got some advice for me that could possible help me? Maybe you experienced the same problems and over come them and have some tips that personally helped you?

I just need some help because I'm getting extremely worried for myself and others around me. I have random break downs and burst of anger for absolutely no reason. And I cry for hours some nights thinking to myself why am I still here. I have completely given up with life and have a weird obsession with death. I'm lost confused and dont know what to do.",4.89587044534413,6.603982707602341,5.273333333333333,80.68384615384619,69.87719298245614,8.770310391363024,28.943319838056677,9.265573868473778,2.526252901484481,717,27,133,15,13,228,102,171,0.23800000000000002,0.7070000000000001,0.055,-0.9833,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,2,1,5,9,1,4,4,0,12,1,0,1,0,38,30,11,1,4,4,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,15,0,0,7,0,0,2,5,9,0,1,5,3,24,0,22,24,6,19,0,2,0,0,12,8,0,8,7,91,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13486589727499793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558049960495493,0.0,0.0,0.09650275076120143,0.0,0.0,0.12286191542752267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16826437353290108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11888702886463015,0.1447052825601376,0.0,0.0,0.11019312337641173,0.0,0.1516021386810732,0.0,0.0,0.1188714444007547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16175163653356242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350043888188151,0.2602150450291946,0.0,0.13956827175661446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07210673298559052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11038257859696612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3700320865326855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13591620465074156,0.1592498783280763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15169801051538814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14995285252831694,0.0,0.09748352428946803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065882321051433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865383313605542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046715889066883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295169949851816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352200648119273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175018845960856,0.0,0.12050869238186733,0.0,0.0,0.13046804688469155,0.1555902946567043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206096814480814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419016031412278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021833339771654,0.0,0.0,0.14428242756813572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093060116944604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768678772482762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954926283423944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794056351408764,0.12453636571019325,0.0,0.0,0.13304078185476514,0.0,0.0,0.1401601385404082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666298957606933
mentalhealth,bluejvinyls,2020/04/05,"Sleeping troubles I’ve been having trouble falling asleep for awhile now but recently I’ve also had trouble staying asleep? Like I can only sleep around 5h before I wake up, then have to do smth to get tired again to be able to go back to sleep it’s rlly annoying. Does anyone know what could be causing this?",3.8188524590163913,5.6789771147540975,4.2565245901639335,86.27495081967214,72.9344262295082,6.191475409836067,26.95409836065573,6.742157984588678,1.2469711475409837,248,9,46,2,5,78,49,61,0.24,0.713,0.047,-0.9044,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,0,0,9,7,6,1,0,5,12,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,0,2,1,8,7,0,10,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,28,5,0,0.2189755408731623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511466092258401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531127896134394,0.0,0.0,0.19493465688774594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683786743779828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18633205697239166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22494820006556587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17483415118529047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19162697146823396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144056822240755,0.0,0.1244488461715378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1203432305587616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698038838881982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665407662498225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21621192920615948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6574010471698803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333987909479884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516801716303361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,internetuser116,2020/04/05,"I can't feel nothing sometimes I'm 18 years old , I live in Spain so if I make any mistake sorry for that.Two years ago I've started having intrusive thoughts ,every day  they were increasingly disturbing. Thoughts about hurting other people, suicidal thoughts... Nowadays, sometimes I feel that I don't have emotions , that I don't love my friends and all this stuff. Recently I read a Instagram post that said : you're like your 5 closest friends , so if you don't love you , you know what to do . That post make me feel nervous because I've been thinking about I don't love my friends . I don't know what i feel. I'm scared about being a psychopath. Can anyone relate ? Or give me an advice. Thank you !",2.5442016806722703,5.018724176470588,3.0353361344537824,90.60294117647062,79.29411764705883,5.650420168067227,28.096638655462183,6.868970318607317,1.3903315126050415,552,25,108,6,14,171,81,136,0.26899999999999996,0.6940000000000001,0.036000000000000004,-0.9838,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,5,1,0,5,13,0,3,3,0,13,3,0,2,1,18,34,6,1,3,3,0,4,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,9,1,0,0,10,1,0,1,6,5,0,0,6,5,20,8,6,27,2,12,0,1,0,3,14,2,0,3,8,58,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304716531625194,0.11835511472586165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09079640713494297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335846704724136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139096475378274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610767418341607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15018909847188086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11249416388068692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700416267277829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3094656246150673,0.0,0.0,0.12808205156088914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293313286461956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675533706679406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06522985499326353,0.0,0.11789830597392115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36151398567690735,0.0,0.17824779593983803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128113541526598,0.0,0.14010404605295446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09256415031408292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557455136661623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355352674503265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183231994515218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270056178605,0.0,0.13367420473466113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641042354544453,0.149461792519083,0.09450429942079776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15284547356588968,0.14604635942553162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292487872666735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555255554662053,0.0,0.31799369287614965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042709411948047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719616497342504
mentalhealth,GAMESLASHER101,2020/04/05,"I dont feel like I've earned my emotions. To give some context I am a 19 year old male.I've always been very depressed,anxious and I've also had suicidal tendencies since I was about 10 years old. I've never met my father and my mother always had rotating boyfriends the only one that stayed around is the father of my two siblings and he abused me. My mother also abused me mentally more often than physically as well as most of my family seemingly being against me at every turn. I've always hated school because it made me incredibly anxious and depressed as well as providing unneeded stressors. For as long as I can remember I have had a problem with my appearance,realistically I'm not terrible looking but I always think I am especially when I smile. I have always played a lot of video games and most of my friends I have now I met through video games.

I have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder,anxiety disorder and suicidal tendencies but I always feel like I am just weak or lazy.

I've experienced many different situations in life that have really molded me into who I am such as facing the threat of being kicked out of my home by my mother since I was 14 years old,being falsely accused of rape when I was 16 years old and many years of abuse mentally and physically at the hands of close family and friends.

I currently live with my girlfriend of 3 years however I dont work because I cant leave our apartment without feeling extremely afraid,like a sudden burst of overwhelming anxiety and dread. I know nothing bad will happen if I leave but my body is simply afraid and I feel horrible about the fact that I dont provide any kind of financial support to help her and essentially just sit at home all day doing nothing.
I know a lot of people will judge me for that and I understand why but to me it's that or essentially death or that's how it seems to me at least. I wish I could help her but I can't and I feel horrible about it despite her saying that it's fine. 

I never think I've suffered through enough and feel like I'm just weak minded because everyone has a hard life one way or another so what makes my life so bad. I feel like I'm just faking all of it and that subconsciously I'm screwing my girlfriend over just because I'm lazy and dont want to work. 

If anyone has read all of the above information I firstly want to thank you for taking the time out of your day to read what I had fo say and secondly I would love to know your opinion on the matter even if your opinion is negative in nature.

Sorry if I messed up with anything or broke any rules this is just something I've felt for so long and figured I would ask the void of the internet for an answer 


Have a great day everyone!",5.987922794117647,6.0754487113970574,6.809485294117646,76.52080882352944,66.48161764705883,10.329411764705883,32.625,10.125756701596842,3.1646610294117643,2185,85,422,48,32,727,245,544,0.201,0.688,0.111,-0.9946,3,0,1,0,3,0,23.0,1,4,0,4,24,34,4,3,18,0,40,12,3,3,6,97,78,48,3,12,22,5,10,4,4,4,6,2,2,0,18,28,0,0,20,7,0,0,11,19,2,5,13,14,67,15,63,58,12,41,0,5,1,3,31,15,1,19,27,279,85,6,0.0,0.21983934859311816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989196685457118,0.3087750120241604,0.0,0.0,0.08411754045502834,0.06485303507345141,0.0946271225087758,0.06987065123144852,0.0,0.0432455692712289,0.0,0.05089564554664579,0.05505784480241949,0.057819544013877025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328101622202986,0.1508079005852043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869920067023634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049380606382710295,0.0,0.0,0.11966055698405005,0.0,0.10653920727968837,0.06277443209377767,0.0,0.06461801071885727,0.07088318204972968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899416461093933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957069098470231,0.0,0.0639055312484459,0.0,0.04085002979757914,0.0,0.052109619090569416,0.11819685520575406,0.0,0.0,0.1166096061144639,0.0,0.2189054986358017,0.17673693360207218,0.05938379229021218,0.0,0.0,0.05260788892413399,0.0,0.0,0.09556724404784783,0.0,0.0,0.05933025046753074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818765353244717,0.0,0.0,0.054691994327308605,0.0,0.05540367215676152,0.061062109171515076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291083986986338,0.0,0.12407720119543265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440518892056482,0.10197015272058478,0.0,0.0,0.13097623288448695,0.0,0.0,0.13105524358250625,0.12086326187151113,0.0,0.05461292927373968,0.10946709189932544,0.051936754752859166,0.0,0.0,0.1051619392155857,0.05582024714193903,0.0585220860587545,0.04128402945422995,0.12540835708169876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12465650215941886,0.0,0.06244886302849863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09540200206874684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868967453948068,0.0,0.2595963460152603,0.0,0.08381962954972634,0.04703820145608576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042877625362191515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05918019642843135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372950145693068,0.0,0.039621421334819176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006174306025867,0.0,0.0,0.0983680459068658,0.0,0.06259349185077538,0.0,0.11260821778831692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232263223310124,0.06951975881619142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047613622626544436,0.0,0.06923378785252919,0.0,0.0659217535468138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530337746766266,0.0701843931026711,0.0,0.0,0.046502009280452984,0.0,0.0,0.0569413415436815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925941983065926,0.0,0.0,0.03606407420225647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06727287888576425,0.0604165225928027,0.06438596352981264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05103108861449219,0.07295912190559359,0.04909207454856162,0.0,0.0,0.11121758406779242,0.0,0.05580821259110196,0.0,0.07112216355165928,0.05961927823006514,0.0,0.09005218127272913,0.0,0.0,0.08787010896277073,0.0,0.0,0.2389685586358523
mentalhealth,RonnieBeck3XChamp,2020/04/05,"Working from home is sending my anxiety through the roof I work as a construction manager for an essential service, telecomm construction, weve been hooking up doctors offices and home offices with fibre to allow people to work from home, so I understand why were considered ""essential"". 

All the clerical staff have been working from home for 2 weeks at least, and our technicians arent allowed in the office, everyone goes straight to job sites and I meet them on site.

My wife is about 9 months pregnant, and our doctors had expressed concerns with me still working, and have told us if I don't pass their screening I wont be allowed in the delivery room. My boss and company have been unbelievably supportive and have allowed me to work from home until the baby comes so that I dont risk missing the birth of my first child. 

I know I should be happy and thankful that I'm being taken care of by my company, but instead my anxiety is through the roof. I feel guilty that my employees have to go in while I'm sitting at home. I feel like the other managers who still have to work will hate me for getting special treatment (they wont, they're awesome people, but my brain doesnt seem to realize this)

Is anybody else out there having similar feelings? 

Again, I know I'm incredibly lucky to be able to keep my job, while so many others are not as fortunate. But I'm sure many of you know that counting your blessings isnt always easy when you're dealing with mental health issues.

Anyways, thanks for reading, curious if other people feel the same.

Thanks,",9.015443099273618,7.649881684745765,8.387857142857147,72.45631355932206,60.966101694915245,11.547215496368036,41.41041162227603,10.451354775682146,4.34502421307506,1247,60,221,23,14,394,166,295,0.073,0.7859999999999999,0.141,0.951,7,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,4,2,3,8,11,14,1,1,11,0,31,4,1,5,2,40,57,22,0,3,6,1,4,1,0,4,3,0,7,1,9,13,0,1,10,1,0,4,8,3,0,1,8,5,32,11,38,41,3,28,1,1,1,0,17,12,0,4,12,150,41,17,0.08958578557025577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454255016210576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370657615083352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10000736449452824,0.0,0.0,0.09133867896850144,0.0,0.0,0.07717022180121041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235901122428984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18338969521184684,0.0,0.0,0.10499387348822373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483742844702286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560305722687825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811890597439913,0.06400010311147708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620162344113979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04680487544351574,0.0,0.050913666444814966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095365734580451,0.0,0.08844741624815458,0.0,0.09522550084098676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5391710838326824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350428501755068,0.1778001377299923,0.07962796243305037,0.0,0.0,0.1477020146361524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0437670896768092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18165185104638595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09028140105317896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150651934392918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18632251143617445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961002875612152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155553457636144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430866481581662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166088782553656,0.08443354269574281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24743566536963305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560305722687825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326196219105383,0.10776066963417354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186031345317524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083723729958119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4565366319969195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AdhdCollegeTeacher,2020/04/05,"How long do manic episodes last? My fiance is bi polar and on medication, he messed up a few days of his meds and started having exatreamly manic episodes worse than anything I've ever seen aka I am god, talking to and as his dead father as well as they grays aka aliens. He does come back to me normally before sleep but falls asleep fast because he exsausted his body but he just wakes up in the morning manic again. My question, if anyone has ever had a loved one with something similar...how long will it last? Also he is now taking abilify because of the episodes, it's been like a week now and he has been on his meds steady for I'd say 3 days. He is not agressive and I am not leaving his side unless he tries to hurt us, but he hasn't so I'm not worried. Sorry for being all over the place, this has never happened and I'm just trying to help the situation...so any advice is welcomed and appreciated To add: his other meds are paxel and lexapro if that matters at all.",4.454475524475527,5.063291595959593,5.427777777777778,83.27576923076923,69.9090909090909,7.506449106449107,28.362082362082358,7.321109707123232,1.4989583527583532,768,26,155,7,13,253,125,198,0.053,0.812,0.136,0.9466,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,1,0,12,6,0,0,7,0,18,7,4,1,5,31,26,20,1,3,11,1,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,5,11,0,0,1,0,0,2,5,2,1,1,4,3,13,4,22,20,3,27,0,1,2,2,24,9,0,3,17,98,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134827317203686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033834820310323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938275532577883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647514494622976,0.0,0.11354145323995765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609405692027228,0.0,0.16821623941107097,0.0,0.11740633979646832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15325882984180306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885301974783835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17796458340782625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074262309947616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496120996137064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201060522599833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248155856026974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477048107886681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22493565357557924,0.0,0.14609532565973954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740748765842765,0.0,0.0,0.2442066027988622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452758802127112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4597764895254091,0.1389950329488279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641462388918296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13518594851923935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934952533452838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14415423487987844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15456328366501704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972304963107478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13807438179754014,0.0,0.0,0.1062196942188715,0.0,0.15445142313557222,0.0976592297734474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10373983187700414,0.11089886808799056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873515805293017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16596662154299813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106750123893272,0.0,0.1240558596444262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012004398537808,0.14060804562717882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,avienblue,2020/04/05,"The brain is a physical organ too. Judging a person having mental health issues is like saying, ""It's just a heart/kidney problem. Get over it"". Many people with depression or anxiety often keep their problems to themselves to avoid being labelled ""weak"" or ""attention seeker"" by society. If society understands that the brain can also have problems like any other organ, then the stigma around mental illness might be reduced significantly.",8.903835616438357,10.927557739726028,8.693041095890411,58.74202739726029,60.64383561643835,10.223561643835618,36.51780821917808,10.355215969177356,4.692832328767123,357,16,41,8,5,115,59,73,0.223,0.716,0.061,-0.9081,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,0,5,8,0,1,6,0,8,5,2,0,0,15,11,5,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,1,3,1,0,1,4,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,1,2,6,8,0,3,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,5,3,33,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14302568002043525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162362250200287,0.0,0.13681918615548574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921375008826805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3993098223545578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540425963212156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09344135101020512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901083886003149,0.0,0.2119372215040952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18667214973848728,0.0,0.1589694303729824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17475341833229585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813250672546161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3604759549326782,0.18973079015722571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12399155021945844,0.15616426592070315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5134037322824969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14222810149843326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18618837594197746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myhuky,2020/04/05,What are some things that make you happy for a while? Like getting a piercing (for those who like it) or a new hairstyle,3.017500000000002,4.763005750000001,2.8566666666666656,95.955,74.83333333333334,4.800000000000002,24.5,3.1291,0.0276500000000004,94,3,20,0,2,28,20,24,0.0,0.674,0.326,0.8271,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,16,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25552451731582404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5206355762349255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4778803215695516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3264652130975552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4723572572717759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3249235328588516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jazmin9199,2020/04/05,Advice for my boyfriend who has been going through depression Hi everyone! I come to you guys because I need help and I want to help my boyfriend (male 21)whom I love very much. He is very much into philosophy and is always on YouTube listening to debates or reading philosophical material. He has been feeling very depressed lately due to a lot of factors and the more he gets into philosophy the more he learns about himself and the world the more depressing it is to the point where living doesn’t have much of a purpose anymore. He is perfectly functional and overall he’s a very outgoing always happy personality kind of person but there’s days where he’s just extremely down and would rather not exist or just be alone in the world. I have suggested a therapist but he feels that it won’t help because he is afraid their response is “that’s just the way the world works as shitty and depressing as it is and we can’t do shit about that”. I am trying to be very supportive because I know he has some points when we speak certain topics and how there’s some things that is just very depressing when u are exposed to the reality of things but I want to know if there is such a thing as a philosopher/therapist duo or a book or some philosopher he can search that has a positive outlook on life. He has been reading a lot on moral impediment and the more and more he educates himself the less he has the want to try or feel like there is any reason to live and this life is just suffering. Idk what to say or how to help at times other than just trying to be positive. I want there to be someone he can talk to or listen or read on. Any advice could help,5.782317073170731,6.129614060975612,6.1316097560975615,80.31217073170734,66.92682926829268,9.608780487804882,31.948780487804875,9.516144504307137,2.7366226829268294,1324,51,263,25,20,426,154,328,0.096,0.764,0.141,0.8998,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,2,1,1,2,21,15,1,1,21,0,36,4,1,3,2,60,53,31,0,9,20,0,3,1,0,2,2,4,0,4,15,17,0,0,7,4,0,2,4,8,0,0,3,7,17,7,36,43,14,25,1,6,0,1,39,16,1,14,7,183,32,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16727878959054449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864737479776824,0.0,0.0,0.14243860201207714,0.0,0.0,0.11641082730656073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848841460021315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565280473298696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372982602837083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683381517197857,0.0,0.0,0.0551996819336564,0.0,0.36860080528163786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178670955608698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298334792361485,0.061146856365948486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044718224765758735,0.0,0.04864383802229568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474941820215247,0.0,0.09111414812046266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868521657231723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913077206634032,0.0940781179491404,0.0,0.096551369062861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209121525726557,0.0418158692863655,0.0,0.15115839678621246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14553431161950706,0.07725001367252131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887596409761444,0.0634652946883841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14947105683561948,0.0,0.0,0.1618239851888751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25684512794088604,0.0,0.0,0.0880027082236411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06806609859610721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785883510734004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07252172239542819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712865141912766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879551119709354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19875753997086146,0.1705903260481382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049909313696284006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743338049113846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4237335907706513,0.2019372343662638,0.06793885058311631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06231190822990902,0.0,0.0,0.060802015991792524,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,atleast4ships,2020/04/05,"What are safe things to think about / fantasize about to calm yourself in a fearful/stressed/panic moment? Dorothy told herself ""There's no place like home"" in wizard of Oz 

Fantasizing about being back with a girl you liked in my experience hasn't been a good idea for me- it has a depression rebound effect when you remember she is no longer here. 

Anthony Bourdain talked about he would sometimes fantasize about killing himself to help calm himself down ( I believe he imagined jumping off of a building)

​

**What is safe to think about to calm yourself in a moment of panic or stress? Sometime I try to focus my thoughts on my breathe but I have found this takes alot of concentration and I can't sustain it for very long**",3.975873015873013,6.828012074074074,3.729232804232805,85.50083333333335,76.4074074074074,6.227513227513228,31.124338624338627,7.447530270364453,2.17521164021164,590,29,103,8,14,178,91,135,0.105,0.785,0.11,-0.253,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,1,10,12,1,2,7,0,10,1,1,1,0,16,16,4,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,6,2,0,2,8,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,4,0,14,8,26,10,1,14,0,1,0,0,12,8,0,2,7,72,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19540865212838204,0.21914443233629827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386776645771942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031921734216302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533479523882282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17641645728484076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977439627138386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15126863821315314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088449560596098,0.0,0.1809052942444151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20359267936334188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19953004590895845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17621935167417666,0.0,0.0,0.1596036683559305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116013276720092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842688471303054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20430087270632694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35674061479205194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20658978967092295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356004099187649,0.14495812939130082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981622117439808,0.23112140712333945,0.0,0.14317739017126285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723317149625435,0.0,0.12244549976147248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14880725890772847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12811513931685944,0.0,0.21914443233629827,0.0
mentalhealth,Janktea,2020/04/05,"Should i seek help? i’ve dealt with a feeling of sadness and melancholy for four months now. it’s taken a lot out of me. i haven’t been able to bring myself to text my girlfriend. i keep thinking to myself i can’t be depressed because there are people out there dealing with much worse stuff and my problems are so small and insignificant to theirs i should just be able to deal with everything i have by myself and i did for a long time but it’s hard and it’s getting harder. i self harmed, small cuts on my hand. i don’t know if i’m worthy to get health because someone who needs it more should be able to get it. i don’t know why i’m like this.",0.9392236024844748,2.970079630434782,2.106459627329194,97.51695652173916,82.40579710144928,4.522567287784679,20.002070393374744,5.288315135182226,-0.40304513457556895,511,14,117,2,14,162,81,138,0.15,0.7440000000000001,0.107,-0.4276,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,5,6,1,0,3,0,15,2,1,0,0,24,28,8,0,6,3,0,3,1,1,3,1,0,0,1,8,10,0,1,4,0,0,1,4,5,0,1,3,3,18,1,18,19,3,10,0,2,0,0,7,5,0,2,5,78,26,0,0.5147399232610397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20918711971779588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3537828391519658,0.1477815805496451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420501746838974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675599046832111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689303647970347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537019553390567,0.0,0.0,0.18238148936750512,0.0,0.0,0.1150064401033225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15250816488841887,0.0,0.0,0.18859173347487654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838253086625079,0.0,0.0,0.15184287805508898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458711584942292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13695349861388012,0.0,0.12613102344384106,0.1272243769507253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895195032952467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16417886313857374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17899533352239785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453791555282973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19641802056207336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10994151951284327,0.0,0.0,0.1000496628941077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15482423935654754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17485465242163856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bobihadidg,2020/04/05,Am I Crazy I recently found myself only attracted to crazy people. People who could murder me at the drop of a hat. I’m in some way addicted to mental and physical abuse. help!!,0.77542857142857,3.3238499714285723,3.66,81.29000000000003,92.14285714285714,7.371428571428572,18.42857142857143,8.238735603445708,1.6534,139,4,25,4,5,49,30,35,0.35700000000000004,0.523,0.12,-0.8975,0,0,0,0,1,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,4,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,5,2,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,16,5,0,0.0,0.3746275924219802,0.0,0.34468838541043323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25244804171610424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3466805976443098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21193218041883946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31864017235259184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24047298551591215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4384058175483227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3121946013048059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25097298294628945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jgolf899,2020/04/05,"I know I’m not the only one feeling lonely and fighting against my mental health issues... This is an attempt to vent and reach out for others who may be dealing with similar issues... 

I’ve been in a recovery program for a couple years now. I’ve suffered with a severe case of bulimia for 15+ years, alcoholism and substance abuse for 13 years, and a mood disorder for a similar length of time. I also work in a counseling position and am studying to get my LCSW someday so I can hopefully help others who have battled similar issues (Eating disorders seem so under treated in our communities so I think that would be especially fulfilling). I had a spiritual shift a couple years back and it brought me this beautiful sense of self-compassion and hope that allowed me to break free from the intense cycle I had been stuck in for years.. however the addiction ended up shifting over to a relationship that within the past few days has come to an end for the foreseeable future. Meetings are all online now and for some reason it’s just not the same... my sponsor has too much on her plate and I haven’t seen her in weeks... I’ve become so anxious from this pandemic and the insinuations from my ex that I’m not making attempts to look good and have put on some weight... that I relapsed into my ED very, very hard. I’ve been stuck back in the cycle for a couple weeks now... and one day was feeling so suicidal that I finally turned to kava for relief. Now I’m drinking kava, feeling guilty because it’s a taboo in the sober community although it is providing me with some comfort, feeling isolated, ashamed because I’m in a position at work where my job is to guide people in recovery, and single as fuuu. I just have so much resentment against the idea of complete abstinence from mood or mind-altering substances... I just don’t know if I could attain that again... maybe I can, but it seems like such an abstract concept from this vantage point. I’m just in a low at the moment, I know this too shall pass. Hope everyone is doing what they can to keep themselves in a good place mentally and spiritually ❤️",5.7977415687760505,6.547967660098525,6.6305418719211815,75.33760136415309,66.98029556650246,9.792951875710498,33.595680181887076,9.851270322608157,3.3513356574460023,1674,73,302,36,26,555,215,406,0.085,0.8270000000000001,0.08800000000000001,0.3248,3,2,2,0,3,0,49.0,1,0,1,5,22,19,3,1,28,0,29,6,0,3,1,57,57,26,1,6,10,1,6,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,22,20,4,2,12,1,1,4,5,7,0,2,10,8,27,11,55,41,9,53,0,3,2,0,12,25,0,11,24,215,49,4,0.0,0.10784478519373554,0.0,0.09922612651951232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727357297128934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278931506587732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282761600628933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399787809324778,0.0,0.11097089134550893,0.10052534205704967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840637495344553,0.09543359566225898,0.0,0.0,0.07267271653815079,0.30213841077414405,0.0,0.1174017949624838,0.09383846638455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20863548561954334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916574940301937,0.0,0.0931370199253451,0.0,0.0,0.1612348562243455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08697429196693841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840914412860583,0.0,0.0,0.09970885677738446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04755462052612695,0.0,0.0,0.15268788694236038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153677438903856,0.0,0.0,0.09675087293776498,0.0,0.0,0.06100933549807783,0.0,0.0,0.27121262888925624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275142414225544,0.0,0.2850062573252158,0.09032411686947732,0.08090348496583816,0.0,0.0,0.15006798309811026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04446817391118542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643456272719082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0607571026331178,0.0,0.09144264545442216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18345515192459672,0.0,0.0919050788041537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13382154806440108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335612348277805,0.06922543345031583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868896697579466,0.06310237443472527,0.0,0.09509738175015424,0.0,0.08604409329744972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915010619524241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358456013779816,0.0,0.0977222946681612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16572386794468405,0.0949545638109254,0.10282761600628933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995620013366691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058322464751552186,0.0,0.0,0.05307497079722115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900451242093804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15020341422185254,0.0,0.0,0.14602281940813108,0.11083883486251936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252847874234674,0.0,0.0,0.06465857741131055,0.0,0.0,0.2930721119657061
mentalhealth,Deadlyfloof,2020/04/05,"28 and my family & spouse are now adamant I have ADHD.... Hey all,

This is literally my first post on reddit...

There is a reason behind it as well, due to recent quarantine/isolation apparently I have exhibited more noticeable symptoms, coupled with my brother being recently diagnosed - my parents have used the criteria that was used to diagnose him, and applied it to me - coupled with the input of my other half... and its been thought provoking, and the reason's they seem to believe I may have ADHD is because.

When i got ""sat down"" over face time, these were some of the reasons/things they listed.

\-I'm very impulsive, e.g end of last year bought $70,000 car without much thought because I liked it.  
6 weeks ago, I bought home a new puppy, after we already had 2 dogs.  
\-I have issues completing tasks once I've formulated an idea/plan - I wanted to go back to studying so I spent $700 on a course to take A-level biology... I haven't even begun yet, as I'm no thinking about progressing my finance career instead.  
I am also currently doing a CiPD qualification, but it bores me and has taken a back burner.. but ultimately I know that little bit of paper will be valuable.  
I cant watch TV or a movie without doing something else or being on my phone, if it doesn't get my interest in the first 5/10 minutes I switch off, very much when having conversations with people.  
I cant watch how to videos - I always end up skipping to the end product...  
If i'm watching a video on you tube/Facebook and an add pops up, I just go on to the next.  
I always do enough just to get by and I leave things to the absolute last minute.  
I'm smart but my teachers always just said they wished I had applied myself, If i got a C in an exam.. i was very much like I'll get an A next time and bring it to an average of a B.  
I wanted to learn another language, I downloaded the duo lingo app and paid 1 yr subscription - not used it in 2 months...  
I have great ideas, with massive potential but never follow them through - business orientated.  
I'm restless and wont finish 1 task before i get distracted by another, apparently a prime example is cleaning the house... I'll start filling the dishwasher and then notice the windows are dirty, and get to work on them before I've finished the first task.  
I have strong foundational knowledge on a lot of subjects, but nothing of any true substance.. ""this one hurt fyi""

The reason this has come out, as in being in quarantine and having to work from home - I'm finding it near impossible... When I'm at work, i get nudges from colleagues to put me back on the right track, but take that out of the equation and its madness.

I can't even get a Dr's appointment to follow this up atm, due to recent lockdown - this isn't considered an emergency and it's now began to concern me... what should I do, whats the next steps? how do I go about potentially identifying/tackling this? I'm currently based in the UK.

Thanks in advance guys & girls.",4.511579278787625,5.650925683304648,5.6766886360774125,79.60317031190968,70.13597246127367,8.628705763821838,30.00549934931363,8.979522561349006,2.4756544309642754,2326,92,445,43,41,775,302,581,0.057999999999999996,0.88,0.062,0.6793,5,4,1,1,0,0,107.0,1,1,5,9,23,15,1,2,37,0,43,5,1,9,3,69,90,37,0,7,17,3,0,2,0,4,4,1,4,2,25,24,0,0,12,3,6,12,12,5,1,5,18,4,53,10,71,64,9,82,0,1,3,0,17,27,0,9,44,293,78,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735782380906046,0.0,0.06401477323929268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969171169822307,0.057750790202877975,0.1802674958525367,0.1564911474956613,0.0,0.04910908520640238,0.15144870894168155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665880191997251,0.0,0.08804392044245442,0.0,0.12290031541151802,0.08136225298764513,0.0,0.0,0.07884073285280534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06220734604256909,0.07571668391726714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15981037836901146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14659463021865213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060326868313691114,0.0,0.1918847638580498,0.07461802050472904,0.0,0.09539544704524083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807844180396393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600375121689411,0.1842796605128136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641076973299463,0.0,0.1231253711433106,0.0,0.1155148266287513,0.07961795528579127,0.0,0.07150479892600115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448762722427933,0.0,0.0,0.08332710795280822,0.07730829470195252,0.1630452473227927,0.0,0.07537432546887599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03968780582802308,0.11773070696036728,0.0,0.0764658945797003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056179000793593,0.07237900413911967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06139512170080325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057641803914806077,0.0,0.15926032838536427,0.0,0.05569712360955508,0.06974627765978149,0.2304063334889194,0.0,0.0,0.06929281703375216,0.16443588125587247,0.0,0.07690725843440648,0.04893516033944536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018687901184564,0.0,0.0,0.0500652050920538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916258373043715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725966253065098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22274899662904768,0.21391258214178607,0.0,0.0,0.06167172886042641,0.06869357396414773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574237112013652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055595097952312586,0.0,0.0,0.05111457423342499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505966052486501,0.10859428954623776,0.0,0.0,0.06648642312908606,0.0,0.0,0.04797683658310272,0.046272841322016915,0.0,0.11466224161156575,0.08421899562484228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871132789210086,0.0,0.17875630210213256,0.08518926527961537,0.0,0.05792699931878439,0.0,0.06493049823960878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304437745156,0.1392265251079133,0.0,0.15772145331005652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046504479502597056
mentalhealth,Malachite237,2020/04/05,"Floaty brain post I feel like my mind is in a body of water, like each little piece of it drifts around and rearranges itself into different combinations of emotions and identity and stuff but then sometimes all the parts drift away from each other until I don’t know who I am or if I am even real. 

There is no point to this post I am sorry, I am just floating around in my thoughts right now and this analogy keeps repeating in my head. I hope this kind of post is ok",2.901289473684212,4.6700010631578985,3.8223026315789497,88.80924342105264,75.21052631578948,7.276315789473685,22.40131578947368,8.07648339933343,1.0130263157894737,371,10,78,6,8,119,67,95,0.045,0.847,0.10800000000000001,0.7096,1,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,2,1,8,4,3,0,1,22,13,9,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,9,1,1,4,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,10,5,14,12,5,19,0,0,0,0,1,10,0,3,6,60,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30621902392821154,0.0,0.0,0.16159232245546906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910445482326948,0.0,0.19200016326882935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796952300032787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19346806221527385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359921821261823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696441814361433,0.12287125361950553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17651360484610049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17082705058445602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528745594405338,0.0,0.1791033971447857,0.09452240865330773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805339099219313,0.17238135655074852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17366308062582456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18625077930991515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16258821064212656,0.0,0.494162919805786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957647640595424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688038897794586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17010467196387205,0.19253117348794865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19688990672452109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365425857211289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KoiDawg,2020/04/05,"Should I seek help? Ok this post will be an in depth look at my mental health over the last year and a half or so. About a year and a half ago I was extremely depressed as a result of loosing an extreme amount of weight for wrestling. I didn’t feel happiness for about 3 months or so and eventually became suicidal. The day before the qualifier for the most important tournament of my season I had the worst cut of the entire season. While I was running on the treadmill I thought “if I just let my legs give in and hit my head off the track of the this then my parents would surely stop this” I didn’t and ended up going to bed that night. I was in such great pain I went to stand up and use a knife I had in my room to kill myself. Luckily for me my leg cramped up and I couldn’t move until morning. I ended missing weight the next day and just started eating to cope. After growing 2 inches and lifting for an entire year I still don’t weigh as much as I did during that period. I just felt so bad about myself. Eventually, alone, I got through it and felt happy to be me again. 

But right before school started my mom gave me a talk on how school is going to be more important than it was last year and I that I’m only going to be allowed to play video games and go out with friends on the weekend. I was a mostly As some Bs student as well. But I broke I went up to my room and cried for at least an hour and a half. I’m normally so calm and collected but I felt powerless. That same feeling came up again in December where after going from school to practice to an outdoor concert I felt overwhelmed and was ready to cry at the concert. I would have stuff like that happen later in December and February. Earlier this month I was on call with my girlfriend when I got text messages from my dad ‘trying’ to motivate me to lift more I told stuff like “you should be done g at least double your body weight” and “Look at this kid doing 350 lbs” and he has said stuff like this before and normally I would get mad but that day I just started crying out of nowhere and I didn’t feel the same the rest of the night. Now this is when I realized this might be serious. Two days ago out of nowhere on call with my girlfriend I just got sad. No reason to my sadness but I went from my happy self to wanting to lay in bed the rest of the night. I listened to music and felt a little better but later that night I had a complete breakdown. I was crying for 20 minutes, I had full body twitching, and didn’t know what caused any of it. If it wasn’t for my girlfriend who helped me with some things to help calm me that she learned from Therapy as a result of her depression and anxiety I don’t know what I would have done. Yesterday I had that same feeling of sadness and ended up going the entire day until about 8:30 without eating anything. I had another breakdown of sorts which wasn’t nearly as bad and I eventually was able to fall asleep for a nap and woke up feeling 100 times better. It’s been two days since the original incident and my body still twitches every 30 seconds or so. It’s usually just like a back muscles or a knee or hand so never major but it worries me that it’s still happening. My girlfriend and I believe it might be an result of anxiety. I told her that if I had another breakdown like that I would talk to my parents about seeking medical help but I that was two said before yesterday’s events. Does it seem like anxiety? Should I seek help or do I make sure it is not just a one time situation? All replies help, thank you!
I live in the US as well

TL:DR I have had some mental breakdowns of sorts over the past 6 months possibly linked to a depressed period from about a year ago. It got bad two days ago and I am wondering if I should seek advice",3.5152686635944725,4.5640352077419335,4.545902073732722,87.11999596774193,72.40645161290323,7.65184331797235,26.48444700460829,8.017231161292626,1.4529285714285711,2966,98,628,41,56,968,306,775,0.11599999999999999,0.754,0.13,0.5382,4,1,0,0,0,1,42.0,1,3,0,3,33,40,3,1,44,1,61,21,9,11,4,124,114,69,2,17,27,4,14,6,5,12,6,5,4,2,41,38,6,1,20,7,0,14,13,18,2,9,48,21,87,22,108,44,21,121,0,9,2,0,39,40,0,21,71,449,128,7,0.04921050519787012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04808793613837456,0.1744885746637328,0.0,0.0,0.05096724227314225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0334648310346793,0.1032030108859155,0.11293770534388413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04049605277106304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037839840913957236,0.12326614894813867,0.0,0.0,0.16749806159366412,0.05544338766215514,0.0,0.08704538559645845,0.0,0.1639853326816731,0.0,0.0,0.10049885574269816,0.05628370811819376,0.0,0.0505527444957428,0.0,0.0,0.05159627843092515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162217168502226,0.22215693338374207,0.0,0.12715480805419768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04306444472239861,0.10071886467978748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070926446702384,0.0,0.0,0.13075770346057705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041461973060891166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441155019141373,0.0,0.2362490111385143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0380199142439383,0.0,0.025710457877187298,0.04720720069561738,0.1678047849629214,0.0,0.15743254588776026,0.05425475570899653,0.0,0.0,0.08703337445257472,0.15715649354627592,0.0,0.0,0.050504175564108036,0.05230846583836888,0.0,0.0,0.1979085859272152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04846243491850307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05444413285851668,0.0,0.05408961338171299,0.08022625954979902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05032107567855623,0.0,0.14425060272629034,0.049321854271849014,0.04345377766796887,0.0,0.08264886076754578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032848394345413666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04957440677913135,0.09918522961021073,0.10440913868657703,0.0,0.057634748927613125,0.11783806726000387,0.052302979099024316,0.03617538355373349,0.0,0.03795417534001246,0.0,0.05233593055894428,0.18472290206862266,0.09643169342868227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03334631189996149,0.037426806713272566,0.052363447129126765,0.0,0.10928488470316056,0.0,0.0469769954960956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05547745059632305,0.04713006093950197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050596595341477424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042025502557348826,0.09362091907094823,0.0,0.0,0.14941097545118906,0.0,0.04479939571482236,0.05133728933377156,0.0,0.0,0.04070743842700731,0.05531466968174845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449434659239808,0.0,0.11789871905646025,0.04114218584597782,0.0,0.0,0.16900276482403526,0.05382830549827492,0.0,0.09276063753317104,0.0,0.0,0.07910708003448312,0.0,0.04530642154631278,0.05627650143181866,0.0,0.032693273008120256,0.0,0.0,0.03906764426033709,0.057390082642555684,0.0,0.0,0.0940454931728705,0.0,0.03341070276695492,0.0,0.1922860520489854,0.0,0.05919417862334565,0.0425020763274167,0.054198419067646886,0.0,0.02902563096592903,0.0,0.0,0.17977541383115414,0.08849230823394644,0.13685589401214018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047437170929773634,0.05336669370748115,0.0,0.04997565676320441,0.0,0.1747886548709831,0.0,0.0,0.1584497595881939
mentalhealth,hannsolooo,2020/04/05,"Feeling lost and slightly hopeless I feel like I have no one to talk to. I have friends but we aren’t close enough to talk about my really serious  and depressing issues. My parents always say that I can talk to them, but I honestly feel like they’ll be scared if I tell them what’s really going on. I feel like I keep on dumping all my problems on my boyfriend and it’s not fair. Plus I have no one to vent to when he’s the problem... I just wish I could vent and get all my feelings out. I know therapy is a thing but I don’t have the money for it and my medical aid doesn’t support therapy sessions. I don’t know if I’m sounding needy, but I just feel lost and slightly hopeless. I’ve been in a dark place before and I’m scared I’m going down the same road. Any advice on which direction I can turn to?",1.9005945499587118,3.2170238034682086,3.6211932287365833,91.10984104046246,76.86127167630056,7.023781998348472,25.073905862923198,7.7094869923839395,1.1252761354252678,630,22,144,9,14,211,93,173,0.218,0.6629999999999999,0.11900000000000001,-0.9525,2,0,0,0,0,2,14.0,1,0,3,2,4,17,1,2,5,0,15,1,0,0,2,36,35,15,0,6,9,1,6,3,1,1,1,2,0,0,6,11,0,1,8,0,1,2,7,11,0,2,3,8,26,6,17,29,4,13,0,5,0,0,12,10,0,2,4,93,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369692031189645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10532845464480677,0.0,0.0,0.0860818090806865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771409651335953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010674327359246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10902705489303917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079563930116606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3840295969190327,0.271296002478341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779888013835104,0.0,0.06613518305433988,0.0,0.1438817908770623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13212134307383552,0.0,0.11251413067233056,0.0,0.0,0.13913507489542248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18552839592691345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763638966632956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752057870028244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17155388303277702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055712055849706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13225387313477774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422485651745052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621865598256665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006650848513825,0.253466359167273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364660437826274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30523150797035936,0.11064044312262172,0.0,0.2895208433571713,0.0,0.08409712519962644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768759964275284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455659419222431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,daintysunflower,2020/04/05,I get very angry in the morning and take it out on my boyfriend. How do I stop this? I get angry normally when I take a shower in the morning. My negative thoughts take over and I end up yelling at my boyfriend while he’s sleeping and wake him up. I know it’s wrong and idk how to stop it.,0.5666666666666664,2.287496698412699,2.178015873015873,98.14892857142858,82.01587301587301,5.469841269841268,24.785714285714285,6.42735559955562,0.4929809523809525,224,9,55,2,6,73,39,63,0.29600000000000004,0.7040000000000001,0.0,-0.9571,1,0,0,0,1,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,1,2,2,2,0,12,8,8,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,10,0,9,7,0,13,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,0,5,36,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23235702028263586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741255876024132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441762251208838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570393218092816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625313196025295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4386590827806049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5917452883754208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20827013253251625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21645950870763594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286829640192542,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SoberBolognaa,2020/04/05,"Sometimes I wish I died last summer I had surgery last summer because my shunt stopped working, causing fluid to build up around my brain. Exactly a week after, I packed and moved all of my stuff by myself to a new city to live with my now ex girlfriend of 3 and a half years despite still being in major pain from my surgery. About three weeks after that, she packed all of her shit and left without saying a fucking word while I was at work. Blocked me on everything and just vanished. It took a little bit, but I got over it. Or maybe I just tell myself that. Anyways fast forward a few months, I meet another girl who I believe is the most perfect thing in this entire universe. We’ve been dating for 3 months now, but tonight she told me it doesn’t feel right. She wants to leave me. I begged and pleaded for her to change her mind, but it still seems like she’s going to go through with it. I drove an hour to where she lives and I’m currently sitting in the parking lot of her apartment complex because she fell asleep and won’t answer my phone calls. So now I’m just sitting here thinking, alone with my thoughts. Telling myself that coming here was just a waste of time, and that I always care way too much just to end up getting hurt in the end. I just want to be fucking loved the way that I show it, you know? I’ve put everything that I have into this relationship for the past three months because I swear to god I love this girl more than I have ever loved anybody else. Now I’m just thinking it was all for nothing. Sometimes I think things would be better off if I just fucking died last summer. Or maybe when my tumor was first discovered. I just wish I didn’t have to go through all of this fucking pain and heartbreak. I wish everything would just end so that I can’t feel anything anymore. I put so much fucking effort into things. I just wish somebody would put that same effort into me. I’ve never felt like I wanted to die before, but right now it seems like it would be a good thing. Especially with everything going on in the world right now.",5.0757413600891885,5.491195637681162,4.956714975845411,87.88612040133782,68.46859903381642,7.335414344109997,29.208101077666296,6.67199483983844,1.3159858045336303,1630,55,337,10,26,503,203,414,0.105,0.7559999999999999,0.138,0.9613,1,1,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,0,7,31,20,6,0,15,0,22,13,3,1,8,76,61,21,3,12,19,1,3,3,1,5,2,1,0,2,27,18,0,2,12,1,0,13,6,10,0,4,13,4,53,10,51,39,13,80,0,2,0,8,27,25,6,7,43,230,80,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704670233030006,0.0,0.0,0.056613206595964326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134395200414746,0.0,0.0,0.06747558072682029,0.0,0.0,0.05598961542798239,0.060568394872911976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442630798633407,0.0,0.0578954701250725,0.07665571681215293,0.0,0.06017423095379638,0.07428005824451504,0.0,0.0,0.07595309759237105,0.06947457713714156,0.0,0.0693694472673801,0.0698939410007933,0.07197536070828361,0.05860885763080926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21183863110944856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05683715929450187,0.0,0.1807848674139232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154441864508527,0.0,0.0,0.2445932747987461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688042845992521,0.0,0.06532731154646465,0.0,0.0,0.05787323134826404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3145009520175251,0.03554713485679975,0.0,0.1546706363401883,0.057067187668524186,0.05441633873513259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700389070337986,0.0,0.07283626655229444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03739199804251516,0.16638056472364804,0.0,0.07204259647996132,0.07392366912603139,0.0,0.0,0.09972003713002436,0.06819211908102531,0.12015789856245584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05784361777025876,0.18422131031078384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367069703708393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869915465903383,0.0,0.16292225086635634,0.07231380554661647,0.1000317648035368,0.0,0.05247522994863302,0.06571168708666238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06528445765215245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14479481661176893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649501304894563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20519145475945075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730475303693474,0.0,0.1743126723724795,0.0,0.054106682424136215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387878649107467,0.0,0.0,0.06984020220573169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345829767082053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086707384666364,0.05688295539334386,0.0,0.0,0.07788742491568591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893671630316388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18080614356712665,0.13078833329552125,0.0,0.05401470583267606,0.039673603186739306,0.0,0.0,0.06501338569035227,0.07559290862557841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12039202372569233,0.10801106244017188,0.10915222950457856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31296214384500753,0.06558636646303861,0.0,0.0990651939622239,0.0,0.0,0.1933294510993652,0.0,0.0,0.04381434977948523
mentalhealth,no1willmarryou,2020/04/05,"In patient facility for Borderline Personality Disorder to help keeping a job? Hi everyone,

God knows if I have BPD or not, even the doctors can't tell. But I have had trouble keeping a job. I finally got a job after 1 year of searching, and it hasn't started yet.

In the past year I have wanted desperately to go to an in-patient facility, any advice on good ones that teach practical skills I can bring to my new job? I know I need to work very hard, but I need something to work with first.",5.184242424242424,5.331507171717174,6.816717171717173,75.57840909090909,68.1919191919192,10.236363636363636,34.68181818181819,10.125756701596842,3.424709090909092,386,18,78,9,6,134,69,99,0.08,0.86,0.06,-0.2159,4,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,4,2,2,0,0,6,0,7,1,0,0,0,14,18,5,0,4,5,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,2,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,2,1,9,1,13,16,0,14,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,9,47,11,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14797436244802153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297670131939284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907191329466344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735503969093244,0.15499367990749333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100017221012366,0.0,0.0,0.14469660179759655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16588272716603586,0.0,0.1288051656165727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606041370807366,0.12701119995672713,0.12111135597125282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13565036183469018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149945834404807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6010784325258083,0.2691935532534075,0.0,0.0,0.166442494686974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22456490848784308,0.0,0.14625077157361518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261199875974683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455581828788572,0.0,0.13222169047146792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657720302864265,0.0,0.0,0.10718200556537996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235534878924532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249445274274873,0.0893165642309073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22048377838720595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19503022203021755
mentalhealth,fucgoddan,2020/04/05,"Lost myself I’ve never posted on Reddit before, first time, and it seems strange to be posting something like this. I don’t know if anyone will read it or care but at some point I just need to verbalize what I’m feeling. I’ve always been quiet and reserved, since I was a kid, but around my sophmore year of high school things started to change, people acknowledged who I was, I always knew I was a funny kid but other people started seeing it too. I hit puberty hard, I wasn’t a short skinny kid anymore, I was attractive, and people started seeing that too. I joined new friend groups, life was amazing, and when I got to my junior year things got even better. I had a way of talking to people, I was always happy, funny, quick witted, I could talk to anyone and laugh with anyone. It was never a defense mechanism, I was just so happy to be happy. I made new friends, friends I could talk to about how I felt, and yet still laugh with unconditionally, it was real and for the first time in my life I was the man. Flashback a year forward and many of them have gone to college, I started getting high more often and it pushed me away from what I was, happy go lucky, not worrying about what people thought, and free. I’ve stopped since then, it’s been almost 6 months and yet I’m not happy anymore, conversations with my best friends in the world are taxed by my own insecurities that seem to come from no where. It gets harder and harder as I search for an answer that doesn’t seem to even really exist. I don’t know how to be myself again, I don’t know how to be the happy go lucky, free, confident person I once was. I’ve never been depressed before but for the past few months I think I have been, I know I can be that same person I just don’t know how to get there. Thanks for listening if you did, hopefully some people can understand, but if not thank you for reading anyway.",5.578394019773327,5.492935830238729,6.054455027730893,82.17686942367978,67.35543766578249,8.339956595129008,27.48119122257053,7.686295010490155,1.4830647214854111,1476,39,296,14,22,478,179,377,0.040999999999999995,0.6729999999999999,0.28600000000000003,0.9989,0,0,1,0,0,0,45.0,0,2,1,5,26,29,1,1,12,0,37,3,1,5,3,70,77,29,0,7,15,0,3,1,4,1,2,2,0,6,20,17,1,2,16,2,3,6,13,4,0,2,27,7,41,27,37,41,7,48,0,2,2,0,20,13,0,14,29,207,61,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071119300692015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17729054002785344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087151349833346,0.14898285220000002,0.0,0.0,0.06322555036951577,0.0,0.0,0.06672847030647228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087072705955568,0.0,0.07453428339393968,0.06281409434902555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241270784064854,0.0,0.07513294356527278,0.0611800475811149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341221318528916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117202771342594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382007689663734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03591137564976192,0.0,0.06819324229001933,0.0,0.0,0.12082429826096493,0.0,0.0,0.21948885300201526,0.0,0.11131979822627132,0.0,0.0807280441320161,0.0,0.11360720299231357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4536319872919002,0.06362268042227345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15007945155787375,0.0,0.07054188960993743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19516198676012694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033132649307508,0.03469826270308984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753002207691867,0.0,0.0,0.06720370390659246,0.0,0.07200620025975599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337980256402172,0.0,0.0,0.052662673411039015,0.16433200687738694,0.13718896102434838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563720411943439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779951417540862,0.2954305391129297,0.12402913260210215,0.0,0.0,0.0671397156817608,0.0,0.13604085152790218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14208449049601146,0.08083975183412936,0.04549916872529548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187909345193193,0.11319231173721868,0.19397008468129576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750196109948507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05467699483066964,0.0,0.0,0.20108185175103926,0.0,0.05671907983554316,0.05937842944220445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17125685255729772,0.0,0.13077691910380151,0.0,0.0,0.09436908441446752,0.04550868689779998,0.0,0.0563843488255585,0.08282819453566842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393747421194162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0563747717196825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212732984219578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13720949934547486
mentalhealth,stephenfitness,2020/04/05,"Depressed & Anxious In Quarantine? (A Message For You) What is going on in the world right is now crazy. This is a new thing and everyone is uncertain about how all this is gonna plan out.

There will be people out here that were already suffering with mental health issues before this outbreak. So all this pandemic will add fuel to the fire.

I just want you to know now that this lockdown is a opportunity to get to know yourself and understand your feelings. 

* Spend time meditating to calm your overthinking mind 
* Plan your day to keep busy so you won’t get distracted in negative thought 
* STOP USING SOCIAL MEDIA and keep the messenger apps so you can still contact people 
* Learn something new everyday ANYTHING I learnt how to solve Rubik’s Cube, Juggle Clubs and also been reading some great books
* Perform some aerobic exercise and go for a run
* Have a book and write down your emotions and also right down your dreams and goals (you may not have any but write down things you enjoy and passionate about)
* Listen to motivational podcasts and videos 

I use the suffer with depression and anxiety attacks and this helped me MASSIVELY.

If I would ask you to study one thing it would be Neuroplasticity. Understanding how the brain worked made me realise how I could fix my mental health problems (Mindset is the best medicine) 

There is a way out from all this depression and anxiety but you got to be taking the actions to make this happen. It won’t happen over night. But if your spend 1% of your day doing something that will have a positive affect on your mindset you will sooner or later see great results! It worked for me.

I really hope everyone stays strong during this time of crisis, it will be over sooner or later. But take this opportunity of lockdown to learn, grow, and be better.

Take care everyone",4.72801801801802,7.260230555555558,4.897558558558562,79.71985135135135,72.27327327327328,7.9234834834834835,27.316216216216226,8.745826893841286,2.3143434234234235,1457,54,250,29,30,456,182,333,0.125,0.7290000000000001,0.145,0.9172,0,3,2,0,0,0,34.0,0,17,0,12,18,21,1,2,14,0,31,5,1,11,3,68,60,31,0,8,10,0,2,0,0,11,3,1,0,0,21,20,0,3,9,7,2,5,4,9,0,1,5,4,27,12,36,38,6,37,0,5,1,1,25,16,0,9,14,176,48,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068947402953188,0.15492842578066324,0.0,0.1049549583864575,0.0,0.06587263339452296,0.0,0.14820542104489426,0.10943172538589488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971298690703386,0.0,0.09055722754758527,0.11019978126010586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824263716901686,0.0,0.10165555707565406,0.08567066673873834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813520020899194,0.0,0.0,0.09876199004948426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773401258156513,0.0,0.0,0.1249419317993316,0.0,0.2502932719613944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089619263104593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776806621747364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04897868109544947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012176373694644,0.0,0.11010308175224696,0.0,0.07747309682278085,0.21359161377653607,0.0,0.0,0.17131769057675855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20592940630897294,0.0,0.0,0.06492766347702962,0.0,0.0,0.09621042504113683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110360003862218,0.0,0.1721990316103792,0.0,0.0,0.1064707384613038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165755202964007,0.0646592309422336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19523756930056785,0.0,0.09780768762206866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18710879909921116,0.0,0.09090277487826673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563933870065727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343102559125052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268828742395499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689284833425342,0.0,0.062055246695041866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654471537783669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719016660770403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874333552371944,0.0,0.14914533596190216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324694423120828,0.07735781971668422,0.08098484413302222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184949626108716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19306166390912394,0.0,0.0,0.07690128796054403,0.11296742752045615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20168316612252726,0.0,0.16732334249771794,0.0,0.0,0.05713445096083029,0.07688822597096466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410401276895873,0.0,0.0,0.13762255631180606,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lithuanian_Berserker,2020/04/05,"Am I a bad person? I've been dealing with negative self destructing thoughts for about 10 years. My way of coping with emotions is burying them deep inside. On a daily basis I walk wearing a mask of ""I'm fine"", while on the inside I'm boiling with rage, desperation, sadness, hopelessness, fury, anger, pain. It takes a lot of energy to deal with myself, leaving me drained of energy to care for myself or others, in the past years a reocurring thought comes to me of wanting every person of this planet to get in my shoes and live with my feelings and thoughts so they would suffer as bad as I am, so they would be miserable, have no dreams or anything to look forward to therefore not being able to see themselves in future, not having desires except for one that it would all end in the fastest possible way, so that they would feel the agony and feel helpless, hopeless that it will ever end. I really deeply want people to suffer in such a way, I want everyone to have their dreams and hopes taken away, that they would be hollow vessels, just getting by through another pointless day or event. Does that make me a bad person?",11.592337209302325,7.547514855813957,10.423343023255814,68.19966569767446,58.58139534883721,12.982558139534886,42.68895348837209,10.125756701596842,4.300872093023256,894,34,161,12,8,283,129,215,0.258,0.667,0.075,-0.9940000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,2,26.0,0,0,6,0,7,17,3,1,11,0,16,4,2,2,2,38,37,13,0,10,7,0,3,0,0,6,1,0,0,4,10,10,1,0,6,2,0,3,4,14,0,1,5,5,19,3,37,23,2,26,0,7,2,0,12,10,0,5,12,114,29,0,0.1156940140724927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12131526130192526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520631581279833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10869833463516286,0.0,0.28979900762500554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179577579487483,0.0,0.0,0.0996601488753472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746130679497762,0.2385508968032593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124461136304098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13014019384298167,0.20494111333108309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104651859335877,0.09747719669798616,0.11055058840431817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17549510919366493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12089069451708373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491026075378152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250325600588526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215993403860743,0.0,0.09715383353887803,0.0,0.0,0.0983589135073382,0.0,0.0,0.0772266527721313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839725812013923,0.0,0.12310658800762772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044302748275672,0.08020766212296704,0.3030586516858449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042761752169155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411654792938062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219315026127962,0.0,0.1206940886045214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698750028481088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27554437208034616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20471798108550093,0.27549756977296985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4109285408683595,0.0,0.0,0.1490063037708705
mentalhealth,chocopinkie,2020/04/05,"You're allowed to express emotions even in trying times. Even if the world is crumbling due to covid, even if you're not in the epicenter. Even if you're not a front liner, even if you get to stay at home, even if you Dont personally know anyone dying. you have the rights to express your emotions, tell people about your problems. Well. Perhaps not to an ER nurse (but if he/she doesn't mind, then why not?).

I know people whose default response is ""	at least youre not on the front lines"" or ""at least you haven't lost a family"" whenever anyone bring up ANY issues.

Sure. They have it worse than us. That doesn't mean we can't share about our own challenges?

Well. What triggered this thought was in a group chat, someone said ""time flies. It's already April"" and I said ""April is gonna feel slow"" because my country entered a half lock down.

And some self righteous person started his tirade of ""well at least you get to stay at home. You're fortunate enough so stop complaining""

All because I said April is gonna feel slow.",2.92784378437844,4.965677009900993,3.0401320132013225,93.25434543454348,75.93069306930694,5.677007700770076,24.093509350935093,6.42735559955562,0.542098129812981,804,26,167,6,18,244,122,202,0.062,0.861,0.077,0.2174,1,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,3,8,1,2,12,9,0,0,9,0,12,0,0,2,2,30,28,12,1,7,13,0,2,0,0,2,0,3,2,3,6,3,0,1,6,1,0,4,10,3,4,1,6,5,17,6,21,20,7,30,0,1,0,0,27,13,0,8,11,99,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240621266992195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764518344646788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721824891075525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13706464298810306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11667784254795235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175950350463886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25292260910074377,0.0,0.11616352713012522,0.0,0.44552796466483385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10598286939239047,0.0,0.11368939805339365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747327620455487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255398718345864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734092438117888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235700298092608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227235295433418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224621484548519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351568562123307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588059749233074,0.1963277258457101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757410538774614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600905384760022,0.3208214767239964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728222807829385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525606584802944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795739312105305,0.23965698295597715,0.0,0.0939910791287786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595781730042172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826309336483484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925170035435301,0.13111009266881096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763281761273743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352316269188663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032466812765953,0.0,0.10144472146247784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145691500571958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shekyy_lopie,2020/04/05,"Just when I mustered the strength to tell my parents Hello all, 

I’ve been noticing my behavior lately and it was basically this; I get fidgety around people, I don’t talk to no one, talking literally makes me feels sick to my stomach, I can’t answer the phone, I can’t go outside for a long time because I think people are looking at me, I don’t like attention or else I start to feel sick, before school re opens I vomit the night before every single time, when I do talk, I feel dizzy and my palms gets sweaty. In public I’m always on edge because again I think people are judging every little thing I do. 

I decided to google what I’ve been going through and found out—

(Before I continue, I know self diagnosis is not health but I was desperate at the time.)

That I may have an anxiety disorder. 

I grew up in a black family so you could imagine when I told my mother that I want to go to a therapist, just to make sure that nothing is wrong with me. But all I got was to pray and trust in god and it’ll go away. Now I was pissed at first but I took her word for it and the next few weeks, my sister sent me to order something but I couldn’t because that mental block and sick feeling came back. I tried to explain to my sister what was happening to me but she told me it’s fake and it’s all in my head ( a phase I’ll get through soon she said)

Now I don’t know what to do, I’m starting to get these really negative thoughts and whatever happening to me isn’t going away. Any advice?",1.9122496129570088,3.5807087041800685,3.699649874955341,89.05367154936289,77.71382636655949,6.793902584256282,23.41562462784328,7.662118739084242,1.0020216982255559,1161,37,252,17,27,390,161,311,0.134,0.79,0.076,-0.9636,1,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,2,12,7,1,0,10,0,25,9,4,2,4,49,62,19,0,3,9,4,4,1,0,2,5,1,0,1,15,13,0,1,15,0,0,9,10,3,0,2,16,7,46,4,33,42,5,44,1,0,2,0,21,14,1,2,21,164,61,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975004558402914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849375887905947,0.0,0.0,0.0694169617004471,0.0,0.07808986453339108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087161329929844,0.0,0.0,0.19181244652848747,0.07849215747580282,0.0,0.18667853700462367,0.0,0.2605841603046795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675074667943088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150147147600167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699094164985822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527358816884371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720112791252546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09623063772150607,0.0,0.20645606860003995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682802161911485,0.0,0.11192393748875128,0.0,0.0,0.2133274622438293,0.0,0.2900681593872794,0.0,0.08164159709165603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18053557224819705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476211331272724,0.10850479914117384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11219947940628663,0.0,0.11514912905330113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049870457308552135,0.10230959377729863,0.0,0.09033636605075697,0.08572033124178735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362765423697359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287123933133033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085617699190726,0.09579386942671818,0.0,0.09794718850761584,0.11621718489911954,0.0,0.0,0.06917111440401373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334622678978325,0.0,0.0,0.21230538564056012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539417753867549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710014293474156,0.0,0.0,0.10330901267436632,0.0,0.0,0.10649026268186396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07858510841869963,0.0,0.0,0.14450354458786538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620789084929708,0.0,0.0,0.24614078310886695,0.08922121276011498,0.0,0.0,0.11852114497475776,0.06781649899606894,0.13081571527227506,0.0,0.08103902160856975,0.1785685918145841,0.0,0.0,0.19508099087413708,0.11341310224922105,0.06930468203934136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060208614560318986,0.0,0.08188131129369207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160694587791008,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mewvow,2020/04/05,"Need help So I (25F) have anger management problem. Whenever I am angry, I tend to lash out or verbally abuse (no, I don't use slangs) my partner without thinking anything. Of course I don't mean any of them. I have said some hurtful things to him like ""you manipulate me"" or ""you just don't want to be with me"" or ""you use me"" or "" if you think yourself so good why you don't have any friends"" etc etc. No, he doesn't do any of them. He is really a sweetheart. He is very understanding and loves me a lot that's why even though he is hurt, he never disrespected me over this matter but of course it's a concern. I don't think my anger problem is good for this relationship or his mental health. I even decided that from now on whenever we will have an argument I will definitely think before saying anything but to my surprise I failed three times in a row and I seriously don't know what to do. Please help.",3.1769806949806965,4.430724308108112,4.552760617760619,85.95763513513515,73.48648648648648,8.096525096525099,26.72779922779923,8.634040054169528,1.72480694980695,707,25,154,13,14,235,104,185,0.18,0.6629999999999999,0.157,-0.593,0,0,0,0,1,0,26.0,1,5,2,1,7,15,2,0,5,0,21,2,0,3,1,34,35,13,0,5,10,0,0,1,3,2,1,2,0,1,7,5,0,0,8,0,0,0,11,8,0,1,1,2,29,7,17,31,4,7,0,3,0,1,24,4,0,8,4,104,36,2,0.0,0.1560731526539178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687335282490153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216797690886262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120886805521553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938174581889871,0.1740068730365836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177077828273426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22097016415164975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400180243698305,0.0,0.0,0.1765856237814398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820296992685156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239287831569446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435441530727395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11198829166124484,0.1188873876644482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14348766323120524,0.0,0.0,0.13274830062501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767277355887752,0.10159480998956397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14459501947547934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2520869868940071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438671484329545,0.0,0.0,0.14142386751511654,0.0,0.0,0.12530109531894004,0.10475338793992264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751255505992578,0.3376174722948214,0.12941961426812815,0.0,0.07681018608786751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371308691424034,0.0,0.2275370406530048,0.0,0.1086873155474029,0.07769510037811285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377235123415759,0.0,0.0,0.12697866107953848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sleepydoe0202,2020/04/05,Could I Be Schizophrenic? Okay so now 10 years now I have been talking to myself. I’ve been doing it since I was 8 and now I’m 17. I have full blown conversation for hours upon hours to myself. But I have a twist to this! I have a spare phone with pictures of characters of my favorite anime or show and I converse with them as if they were real. I’ve gotten to the point I don’t want to talk to friends sometimes. Wherever I go the phone will go. I knew it was weird for me to do that. So I deleted the pictures for the new year of 2020. I got lonely and downloaded all of them again. I know my mom is schizophrenic and bipolar. Is it possible I could get symptoms of it because it seems to run in the family? (I started responding back to myself lately and I’m pretty paranoid. Please help. I don’t think my guardian can afford therapy and junk. Is it possible I could help myself?),0.5629570429570451,2.9144544065934106,2.5484515484515486,91.5260939060939,87.35164835164835,5.726673326673327,21.45954045954046,7.1686216300943375,0.7648483516483524,690,24,146,11,22,230,102,182,0.036000000000000004,0.843,0.121,0.9304,1,2,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,3,0,7,4,0,0,7,1,22,4,0,0,1,21,35,12,0,5,3,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,0,8,8,0,0,4,1,0,3,2,2,0,0,8,0,28,2,22,22,2,19,0,1,0,0,14,4,0,3,12,105,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12182339943718,0.0,0.09657786081738336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794819750266011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493543277983606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240313615584507,0.0,0.08277348170695109,0.0,0.18007959205829033,0.0,0.1267114730061049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21238546580469064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120445765192157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706934830125783,0.0,0.17871668705027166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18555207607863916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301332022713754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739092906133041,0.14976818453707694,0.35721353264249195,0.0,0.16118093970862116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18032877779842085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422932409047345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310554804612973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15669197539408333,0.0,0.11213803772588823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646701194299605,0.0,0.2546811291110677,0.0,0.0,0.18117926892041228,0.0,0.0,0.10151597081012564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09344650901463747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20404830344746835
mentalhealth,Actual_Camp_f_me,2020/04/05,I find it difficult to concentrate and sometimes I am acting sub consciously without even thinking. I am also having trouble in processing or understanding things. Is it normal? I am 19 years old (M),4.476428571428574,7.697111428571433,6.028214285714286,67.42803571428573,77.57142857142857,9.214285714285714,34.464285714285715,9.516144504307137,4.6320000000000014,160,9,22,5,4,54,29,35,0.152,0.848,0.0,-0.6369,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,8,7,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,7,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787577795142548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302325466083043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185940670975579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3415325264919243,0.0,0.0,0.36577407733522543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3447526526363217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315797998095184,0.22335477061746034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36288209391163423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360168480139122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244728669178297
mentalhealth,wonderlandisgone,2020/04/05,Does it ever get better? My brother died a few months ago and it was very traumatic. I’m feeling very suicidal but I know I won’t do it because I can’t put my family through that again. So I just have to live with it forever. I hate every single part of my life now. I keep seeing him dead. I am going to trauma therapy but it is very expensive and I can’t go as often as I need to because we can’t afford it. There is nothing more that I could look forward to. I want this to be over.,-0.4646573208722735,1.4879508130841117,2.6650700934579445,91.83691978193147,87.5981308411215,5.809657320872272,20.1316199376947,7.1686216300943375,0.5272685358255451,375,12,86,6,12,134,72,107,0.207,0.7490000000000001,0.044000000000000004,-0.9666,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,0,0,1,7,3,1,0,1,0,12,1,0,0,1,15,24,7,3,3,3,1,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,4,0,1,2,0,1,4,4,2,0,0,1,3,16,1,11,20,4,10,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,1,6,64,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834097484861402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23153092086061045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16795718683152258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162517645399745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970933403408896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661887747058234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17178162906223038,0.1600047218602932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17902728822632874,0.0,0.09602261549565147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921849728421288,0.0,0.21585689217271625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187493709697051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16879794464885273,0.0,0.0,0.10436784486789402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413683285169678,0.0,0.0,0.1676912384109522,0.0,0.1594739348240875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158184544024994,0.0,0.0,0.1408135318802468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18222075591620696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056506252696022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19090884894857527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15133118169867332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20772728390936954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21717504725702505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4700791494444549,0.1120119875313808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Entire_Subject,2020/04/05,"I feel like I'm slipping through the cracks why do i feel so alone? it may be that quarantine is getting to me, but this isn't the first time ive felt or dealt with this. I used to have groups and circles of people to talk with and hang, but now I feel as though I'm unable to even talk with one of what i perceived to be my best friends. They've all moved on its in part due to us going to different colleges and so on, but I have little to no daily contact with these people. I know for a fact that if I choose to keep in contact with these people I would need to be the one to start the conversation or to hang out with them. To me that seems that the efforts of hanging and conversing with these people in the first place were pointless, and I do understand its a matter of quality and not quantity. However I haven't been able to find new instances of either quality or quantity, or for that matter of fact any of these instances with my current ""friends."" I feel as though day by day I'm slipping through these cracks and losing touch with who I once was in relation to these people. I'm overcome with feelings of dread in these situations when I'm all alone with no outing, no resources for help, and no idea in where to even start. I know that I am not doomed to this feeling and it doesn't define me and that at any moment in time change can strike and it is a matter of how we as humans can adapt. With all that being said I still feel hurt, I still need someone to talk to, is there anyway for me to be able to make these friends and be distracted, I don't want to continue suffering like this. I just want to have enough friends who care enough to talk with me and make sure I'm doing alright as I have tried in the past to make sure my friends were. I know I don't have to keep suffering I just need a little help.",9.91690663667042,5.257894858267719,9.177377202849645,77.7369094488189,62.35958005249344,12.565504311961007,38.50037495313086,9.23628265651192,3.179428046494188,1435,43,323,16,14,457,155,381,0.10400000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.14,0.9466,3,3,0,0,0,0,25.0,2,0,1,5,16,19,0,2,11,1,32,0,0,5,7,82,68,31,0,7,13,0,9,2,5,2,0,1,0,1,28,28,0,2,17,0,0,5,11,7,0,4,6,10,35,12,71,54,8,39,1,5,0,0,23,16,0,7,20,231,63,1,0.17231706036611746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17846850643296594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718151005274248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041806186822601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784436368665617,0.0,0.091144300720266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111302485014192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001732613292734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17804958661194345,0.0,0.11381379321091888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049503914431013,0.0615516711780655,0.08272570043754171,0.0,0.0787473356939344,0.1465728035192084,0.0,0.0,0.3328293334697812,0.0,0.045014275958454836,0.0,0.0489658782271395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550049327566785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09223448853407057,0.0972624933243354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531633207440735,0.0,0.0,0.14205142484515676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418541162396233,0.17270696380290154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638935677633938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17253446378742912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157288236013103,0.0,0.19165637525989848,0.0,0.08321244533858206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175602273472357,0.11676649970465545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330129210077866,0.08224806610062897,0.2986573822913662,0.0,0.09001732613292734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195649230897457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843548999056756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684579782666236,0.0,0.0,0.07300184302910734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196690223818026,0.0,0.13761262699940255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16240679010642212,0.0,0.0,0.2770038517360984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16930063690820776,0.0,0.10047946363657488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05849598639984046,0.0,0.0,0.0896940684643287,0.1036381033902012,0.07441330690213863,0.0,0.0,0.10163706678502288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774467238811042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06120454783304938,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,casuallycasual45,2020/04/05,"My mental health has gone to shit recently My grades are in the toilet with my college semester being online, I hate online school, being up at school better even though my health was shit uP there too. Ive switched my major 3 times after failing the introductory course. I hate going through this and having a shitty outlook on life. I hate how Im told if I don't do well in school I won't be able to be successful. Not to mention I have a shitty GPA and it will only worsen once the semester finishes up.",4.418655462184873,5.342226803921573,5.710504201680673,80.0744117647059,70.17647058823529,8.181512605042016,26.336134453781508,8.418075326091056,1.7569310924369756,402,12,77,6,7,135,69,102,0.28800000000000003,0.655,0.057,-0.9803,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,6,9,5,0,5,0,14,5,2,1,0,6,20,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,6,1,0,3,0,12,3,13,11,1,13,0,1,0,0,2,7,2,1,4,55,14,8,0.16294739400422575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441137282172198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762521694631746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260675913676993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4826304494279824,0.0,0.3464109201256558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17601114743776305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509456331213087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16421264752016926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17353365658686198,0.0,0.12392883583100425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089089345908664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4947343862353669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345263166567316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600949872800437,0.0,0.0950159358320949,0.0,0.0,0.15570321792819872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465092764051156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cecedoll88,2020/04/05,"Civid 19 interfering with mental health needs People who are already suffering from mental health issues are really being left behind right now. I got a new psychiatrist a couple months ago and because of this pandemic I’m going through benzo withdrawal, because the offices I go to have shut down. I also haven’t been able to get a refill on my antidepressant. No one is taking new patients and I really don’t want to go to the hospital at a time like this. Many people aren’t even able to get in rehab. I’m trying to find ways to fight through this. I don’t know what to do. I’ve always done patient stays at the hospitals but where I’m at they are becoming flooded with covid 19 patients. Is anyone else running into similar issues?",4.5358041958041975,6.223894328671327,5.818461538461541,76.50153846153849,70.74825174825175,8.556643356643358,27.685314685314694,9.095868883498916,2.4717468531468536,591,21,103,12,11,198,92,143,0.042,0.9259999999999999,0.032,-0.3315,1,0,0,0,1,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,4,3,1,0,7,0,14,3,0,0,0,10,27,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,2,0,0,4,5,2,0,1,3,0,7,1,22,23,0,23,0,1,0,0,3,11,0,0,7,64,12,0,0.2848459933959648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624939326087256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15716731842838927,0.11389561900336508,0.11850734252110735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958547079084484,0.14592919088815812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17363947372925545,0.15729501024635972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15758833691762605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574817383031827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189761384213913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406904609574486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017203877181985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14882027496457187,0.0,0.24282681348813084,0.0,0.11390868104773028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027779709807562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29730521179296066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827195430206918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474300263642202,0.0,0.0,0.06958068212319299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439456447849486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870577648504829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368067716968246,0.0,0.0,0.10560484741631553,0.0,0.2751060354095557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650950849867848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974763463654122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824796372679715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12162846099404395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15180396449735406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708436875624808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08304799470999345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669586586689304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840047735050744,0.1130487455340378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FrankieJoyB,2020/04/05,"Struggling after being broken up with My (21F) long term partner (23M) of almost 3 years broke up with me almost a month ago now. We had just moved long distance as he went to another state to study. What's more, he broke up with me over FB messenger and then went no contact. The night before he was telling me he loved me and wanted to make it work, then all of a sudden it was 'I can't sustain a relationship over this distance for 5 years'.

I have a history of mental health issues and had been going really well for the past year. He has cut off all contact and I can't seem to find closure at all given it all happened so suddenly. I am really struggling at the moment and having difficulty finding support due to the COVID-19 situation. Thought I'd post here as I don't feel I can voice my thoughts anywhere else. I'm really not sure what to do with myself.",5.621714285714287,5.355915314285717,6.473857142857145,79.81764285714289,67.28571428571429,9.285714285714286,31.214285714285715,8.841846274778883,2.375514285714285,680,24,137,10,10,226,111,175,0.13,0.8190000000000001,0.051,-0.8997,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,0,1,5,9,1,2,8,0,15,2,0,1,5,27,29,10,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,6,10,0,0,6,0,0,4,5,5,1,0,10,2,14,4,26,18,6,32,0,2,0,1,12,8,0,3,18,88,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567504507916438,0.0,0.28393450589513314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866352218634668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12064014209539915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11843487856259904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168573510927738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591596904848701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057403932361089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253712259246571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15070026939993816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14797633845710811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509329505830967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795753568101084,0.0,0.09463595993247748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14287592441479616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131635080289734,0.15068446214801248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13304629881565214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353403462211356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578132653259106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724742200419275,0.0,0.0,0.15221336702920538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290666987641993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936111849591994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964281710562257,0.0,0.0,0.16088466899563011,0.13362132536207064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12391765991515814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22510713784058994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362260937999423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274728141701311,0.2628538200084979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321393928136792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738954898438006
mentalhealth,MarcoGamer640,2020/04/05,"Just need to let it out. Hey all,


The past few months have sent my mental and emotional health spiraling down the drain. January, I was perhaps as happy as I could be, but as February went on, it just went down. My own birthday just felt super depressing in late February, but I’m thankful I got to celebrate it unlike the poor March/April birthdays.

Now here we are in April. People I really care about just randomly decided to ignore me, online college is stressing me out, and I’ve been laid off from my job. I really hate to type this out, because I know there are many people out there who have it much worse than me, but I just need to let it out.

I thought I’d be fine with quarantine, what with me being a Gamer, all I ever did before was stay at home and game all day. But, ever since I got a job at 17, I simply feel bored just sitting at home doing nothing and such. Games haven’t been entertaining me like before. My daily routine has been wake up at around noon, use my phone, play games for a little, nap, and eat a meal. Sounds okay but, I just feel absolutely alone... No one really cares to talk to me and such :/,

This quarantine has really given me time to just think, and I can’t help but think that I am just a failure. I’m so unmotivated in my college work, I STILL don’t even know what I want to do for a living, and hell I’m not even making any money right now. I wouldn’t call myself suicidal, but I do at times, imagine myself in the act.. And I HATE to think that way.

Can anyone relate at all? Sorry for writing so much, and once again I do understand people have it worse. But I just had to let it out.",3.254291417165668,4.201824703592816,4.640494011976049,86.57964321357288,72.92215568862275,7.961876247504987,23.19810379241517,8.344100000000001,1.141567265469062,1257,31,273,20,24,419,175,334,0.163,0.71,0.127,-0.9579,2,3,0,0,0,0,50.0,1,0,0,2,27,17,3,1,10,1,32,4,1,2,6,67,61,23,1,5,19,0,3,1,0,1,1,1,2,0,14,20,2,1,12,6,2,4,6,7,0,1,15,4,37,10,44,38,8,45,1,1,0,0,12,24,1,1,15,191,51,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343289244410288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679135090441035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06982986768114531,0.0,0.0,0.08890348958638494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060878466398997626,0.0,0.16996023540538588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019761603058874,0.0,0.203643697201788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973628900784248,0.0,0.0,0.06440645058488875,0.0,0.08601596501753417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021896619785485,0.0,0.11233780079245467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131923442036111,0.18067223321978704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099229164324372,0.0,0.09588872173290958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974675948467862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631109950158542,0.0,0.1971974967902824,0.0,0.1061547707835689,0.0,0.0,0.0669392619291639,0.0,0.20035103451599667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19820670617980585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109769430593697,0.0,0.11265519587457888,0.0,0.0,0.306364686975094,0.0,0.04879034850406192,0.10009374297129997,0.08818507165315939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666251277795844,0.10125024515460604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006432242432967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971350219686575,0.0,0.14682860556531335,0.14810137388529168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582581993809207,0.0,0.0,0.10635591702207757,0.0676729863796019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953350879071448,0.20770721412486126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559114060260545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528653095704643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261165236154737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117937935903882,0.0,0.10644575629498396,0.07975453110392855,0.0,0.1143981945190899,0.0,0.0,0.10923913252385836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08026993158589503,0.0,0.0919448260848201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19197370594939112,0.0,0.07928385501354279,0.11646740103208784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396587187027913,0.0,0.0862536894946212,0.0,0.0,0.058904598952633634,0.07927038833547452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18515684891402734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727049268704712,0.0,0.2035475816392448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowAwayForever40,2020/04/05,"I feel like people are harsh with me even though I’m very forgiving. What’s the point of being kind when nobody reciprocates it? This is just something I’ve had to deal with for ages, be it in person or online. One particular incident that happened to me recently was just over a game, and normally it wouldn’t be a big deal, but I’ve had to cope with this problem for so long that it just broke me this time. I told a friend a strategy I was going to do before the round started and he just ridiculed me in front of everyone and accused me of “baiting my team” even though it’s worked for me before and I didn’t intend to do that. I just caved in and did something different to appease him.

It’s not the disagreement that saddens me itself, but the way he went about making his case. I felt like he was trying to put a lot of peer pressure on me and “get the mob” against me so that I wouldn’t insist on implementing my original plan. Why did he need to do that though? Why couldn’t he just make his case in a kind manner without the accusation?

I wouldn’t feel so unhappy about this if someone, anyone called him out for his harshness. But nobody did.

I feel like I’m just firmly viewed as a pushover by others for being “too nice” and that makes it easy for them to take advantage of me. I don’t want to change my character into something fake for these people though. I’ve made people I love happy through my personality and I feel like I value that more. But it still hurts a lot. I think others view my kindness as a thin veil to mask weakness and incompetence.

I’m really bad at trash talking so I can’t exactly defend myself with that. I just don’t know what to do with myself if I keep going on like this. I don’t mean to sound pretentious with this post, I just really feel like I’m constantly getting hurt and the thought of people that hurt me getting the “last laugh” just makes my emotional pain even worse.",5.015692307692309,5.249553043589747,5.694166666666668,83.18125000000002,68.56410256410257,8.961538461538463,28.044871794871803,8.841846274778883,1.904641025641025,1517,46,317,24,24,494,182,390,0.15,0.675,0.175,0.7551,1,0,3,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,4,26,27,1,1,17,0,27,3,0,7,1,67,60,28,0,10,19,0,8,6,1,3,2,1,0,2,30,18,0,1,11,2,0,5,11,11,0,1,14,11,44,16,51,38,3,31,1,4,3,1,24,14,0,5,16,215,74,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059139291322202525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061955952180461,0.0,0.0,0.14394023945062095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636415981463859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08947289513768486,0.0,0.0,0.0913993695079552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439355014192984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836658702758964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951394889919626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675900111917548,0.0,0.0,0.08081843262994975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213827290352982,0.24169174275708855,0.08120867527588507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06534518081099469,0.0,0.13256641042946007,0.0,0.09613588240449036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07479253574462284,0.09003544318480082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716292732119874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07517730471120393,0.0,0.2642266452555733,0.046482161213558686,0.0689428098448069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479248547686362,0.0,0.0,0.07484935852533127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14381132365890453,0.07633544691480634,0.08003027256977856,0.22582736553059274,0.0,0.0,0.09213084007220304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271392590498638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286902493490375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057312616922333526,0.0,0.08999754440754129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23454447891251876,0.14770146155241493,0.0,0.0,0.07995407148595657,0.0,0.08100287480832416,0.0,0.0,0.08093025334307767,0.0,0.08502480725893005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836637456307052,0.0,0.08351111818248885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716631341135379,0.19533810840293334,0.0,0.0,0.059865135658441176,0.0,0.06754454226890112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359254647930143,0.06798103771508754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054194522102320716,0.33239199847112777,0.06714592415100894,0.0493184348467282,0.0,0.0,0.08081843262994975,0.0,0.0574232861053113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697861646156988,0.04988662234881912,0.06713451914876753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840516667042396,0.15263797879022814,0.0,0.0,0.08153070760969255,0.0,0.06157419444621385,0.0,0.08619277200594906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nillacoffee,2020/04/05,"In need of coping skills ..To help get this negative memory out of my head. 
It's been a great few days. I've been sleeping better and eating well. Then *BAM* this memory I've blocked out for two years just resurfaced. 
Any tips on how to tackle it?",0.22782857142857085,2.6356046400000004,1.8277142857142863,94.681,92.6,5.257142857142857,15.142857142857142,6.868970318607317,-0.16351428571428528,192,4,41,3,7,62,41,50,0.10099999999999999,0.6940000000000001,0.205,0.7184,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,1,0,2,3,2,1,0,7,4,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,0,1,3,9,2,1,7,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,25,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22148223020544786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880487594725658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100448720135256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3332649800829998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17016101304505624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3590773932558558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3342547113724977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21830497686034508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.241497038264534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32592794923189866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3181544798558569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928368854361108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20973544490777699
mentalhealth,cherry_bean_bunnn,2020/04/05,"I wish I was normal 16F I have sexually intrusive thoughts relating to pedophilia. I’m also scared of being sexually attracted to 15-18 year old girls. I’m 16 and sometimes I’ll fantasize about a girl who’s within the mentioned age range but then get uncomfortable. I’m scared that I’ll never grow out of this attraction because I rarely find adult women sexually attractive. I just see them as “too old” for me. The only adult woman I was sexually attracted to was Emilia Clarke, that’s all I really know. Am I being paranoid?",3.9537843784378417,6.246436633663367,6.077755775577563,71.4761276127613,73.75247524752477,10.033443344334431,29.04400440044005,10.25414643259724,3.631553575357536,424,18,73,14,9,148,70,101,0.114,0.73,0.156,0.6542,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,2,3,0,7,0,0,0,2,11,15,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,4,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,4,2,10,4,10,9,1,9,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,0,6,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19193715571146985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630881766332515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21936621525616445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539613261180332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190407508363808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18511170928351056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351603669394992,0.0,0.0,0.5037035103310563,0.0,0.0,0.18253960471151626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15375754949556214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4805868785553268,0.0,0.191258136819284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373775673141929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905423669971577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760014460388773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15455957385542424
mentalhealth,Hkr0067,2020/04/05,"Parents mean well...but man, they were most of the cause of my mental health being at risk. 27 M 

I hate when parents (with their particular type of neuroses) try to help.

If a parent actually knows and understands the actual issue that I'm going through, then hell yeah--- I'm all ears.

But while my mom means well, there are so many times when she just reacts insensitively without thinking. 

As a black person, I really feel the weight of generational trauma with my mom--- who grew up in an abusive home.

Blacks back then were dealing with Jim Crow laws and No Colored Signs. That's the world my mom grew up in.

I love her to death, but African-Americans just have really hard time understanding the nuances of mental health issues.

I know that she wants to help, and sometimes she does in her own way, but for the most part....mom only gets in the way.

I left my religious faith when I graduated college. (I was a born again Christian freshman year).

Mom tried to understand but she kept using terms like God and Jesus despite them triggering me. Everywhere in the Bible Belt felt like a trigger fest.

For personal reasons regarding pornography, I felt the need to go to a 12 step group and asked my mom (15 year sober AA) for advice. She suggested that I try one. 

I made a mistake telling her about that. I initially just sought her advice because I wanted to honor her wisdom, but all it did was cause her to worry.

I later told her, ""Hey, so...what I'm going through is not like alcoholism.""

This caused her to respect my privacy more. In reality, I stopped going to meetings. I felt like the people in the meetings were dealing with far worse stuff than I was. (All I did was watch porn and it was legal, compared to people who had compulsive problems cheating on their spouses etc, illegal stuff)

The meetings helped me, and I made some nice acquaintances...but my mom is so rigid with her AA stuff. She apparently has never relapsed.

I hear her talk to her sponsees' all the time in the harshest ways.

She means well, but man...her neurotic nature just made me go insane. 

I eventually moved out of her apartment and started going to school in another city. I love her to death, but I only take practical advice from her. I do not consider her a source for mental health advice.

At one point I was so depressed while living with her that I wanted to kill myself. (I've seen a counselor and gotten healthier since)

I always tried living up to my mom's standards and it just...drove me crazy. My sister doesn't talk to her, and while I think my sister is also nuts...she's not wrong in that my mom can be quite judgmental.

I guess I just feel better off by myself.

I get envious when I see people with their close-knit families (healthy relationships).",3.6988964487222056,5.8618352786259535,4.3682575506140084,84.03351310985731,74.07633587786259,7.3809492200464675,25.895121141719212,8.252601668568683,1.7372215068038503,2162,76,407,37,46,689,268,524,0.145,0.745,0.11,-0.9659,4,0,1,0,0,1,95.0,0,0,5,3,19,26,5,2,23,1,23,9,1,11,5,83,70,33,3,7,17,14,7,4,0,0,4,2,1,3,16,19,2,3,16,0,0,10,7,12,4,2,22,15,78,14,60,46,11,58,4,1,6,3,68,23,1,5,26,259,94,5,0.0,0.06390401917366059,0.10526533503018773,0.0,0.0,0.2108181814353141,0.0,0.0576399893706574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043131708012133375,0.04487814491585723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05655542954424935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05042183675835512,0.0,0.0,0.04147259732839777,0.0,0.03287820526287967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477010227704933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16621795168890388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120899623088164,0.04645403737991878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719878128463054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06015165376744866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05084500945345083,0.0,0.054542196790125536,0.0,0.1553578430278096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056357502617090736,0.0,0.18391462829799252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05941535645029392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483150630283626,0.05324953271904128,0.0,0.1719907817937536,0.0607885352119831,0.0,0.10845424945965564,0.0,0.05410108719128055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125880143393451,0.0,0.0,0.05967095908434991,0.0,0.059282404504007284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058600410314621015,0.0,0.0,0.10539944173037803,0.0,0.0952509830957918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735667886022684,0.1531034767052844,0.0,0.054681507929129375,0.0,0.17625270380697702,0.0,0.0,0.1630610352420254,0.0,0.0,0.5685109685978884,0.0,0.057324247112501774,0.0,0.039992033787461516,0.041597908257250335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07309534778219202,0.08203982081408819,0.0,0.0,0.17966492093665767,0.05840622448976601,0.0,0.1121749745767336,0.0941877223538954,0.0,0.0,0.05098589957764474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051608400836325945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05736638912553527,0.0,0.0,0.06910413676727653,0.055454044575832084,0.0,0.05790588187411989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05458498302023535,0.04297912033579775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04461549418224723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05334298033163189,0.0,0.0381753891722634,0.0,0.0,0.045091978866406514,0.0,0.0,0.1852276183948716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04055232120668003,0.08670163501890774,0.0471414667266885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911859296753145,0.0,0.0,0.09434959544981633,0.0,0.0,0.051537093902929286,0.0,0.14647298602163167,0.0,0.0,0.1684443520611534,0.0,0.04658242356662809,0.0,0.0,0.09543657765289157,0.12843300364436386,0.0,0.06567815973221554,0.14548181668067886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199130442546926,0.0,0.0,0.054773493733112084,0.054964255554966125,0.0,0.05896932985787452,0.0,0.06946459517232023
mentalhealth,wifey5lifey,2020/04/05,"I am not doing well in quarantine For all the same reasons I’m sure most of us are struggling — total loss of income, my career prospects ground to a halt, and lack of contact with the outside world and a regular schedule, and physical pain issues with treatments postponed indefinitely. I didn’t realize until tonight just how bad I’m doing.

I can’t get out of bed for long stretches. Increasingly I think things like, what’s the point of doing anything, and that I’m bringing my husband down by being around me all the time. I take long naps most days just to avoid being conscious. I’m tired all the time. I don’t want to do anything I usually like to do — not painting, sculpting, writing. I barely even want to play video games. Animal Crossing is literally keeping my spirit alive through this garbage fire.

I rarely brush my hair anymore. I shower, but I have rat’s nests and just leave them. That’s what made me realize this is serious, it hit me when I realized I’ve read that neglecting basic self-care like this is textbook depression.

I average a panic attack a week so far. Usually I have maybe one a year. I take meds that have always been great at balancing me, but lately don’t feel like they’re doing anything.

I’m happy sometimes. Usually because of things my husband goes out of his way to do to cheer me up. I was happy this morning (or was it yesterday morning?) when he hauled the sofa onto the balcony and I could sit in the sun for a while. I was happy when we had a picnic in the empty park. But mostly I just wish I could go to sleep and wake up when my life can be back to normal. 

Just needed to say it somewhere.",3.846388888888889,5.381187799382715,4.869955555555556,83.23060000000002,72.24074074074075,7.529679012345679,28.3920987654321,8.109356740369918,1.9252144691358024,1293,50,248,19,25,423,185,324,0.11800000000000001,0.736,0.146,0.9245,2,2,0,0,1,0,35.0,2,0,1,1,15,22,1,3,16,0,30,6,3,3,5,56,49,19,0,8,11,2,3,4,0,0,3,1,3,0,15,13,0,4,7,6,0,4,6,10,1,1,7,5,35,12,36,36,10,43,1,3,0,0,11,16,0,5,25,170,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239467065739597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012243314823142,0.0,0.0,0.2741308462505349,0.09884967188784424,0.0,0.12632470761921735,0.0,0.08538336374305364,0.09271425899822117,0.06768931632012858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731375995811574,0.0,0.0,0.07161199787991121,0.0,0.0956391021168833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07334126601922329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056145461435660925,0.07932742354755604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801412806993659,0.0,0.06310692930278336,0.0,0.0,0.12242264844678785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3546143358149029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589753235520142,0.0,0.09869798320719744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12525862820989142,0.11757595754246145,0.0,0.0,0.07843125639831898,0.21699530415997054,0.0,0.0,0.19653486538741705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050692962258096,0.0,0.0,0.11155520295934346,0.0,0.12334106918968266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08233519450591972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879620735063428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524398120272043,0.0,0.11815502245986635,0.1302822136803091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496925415433177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107064457167667,0.0,0.0,0.11416822586608673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830393831284496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583955806619167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11112078759959236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982198816073628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608373982013415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10465444706205043,0.0,0.16697741715078046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14754087510836536,0.07115032991572227,0.0,0.0,0.12949732829626712,0.12762482969183594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13356816420980694,0.0,0.3668865844394531,0.0,0.1309892402703752,0.08813885612183743,0.08907006777209253,0.0,0.0998388307126117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769120470051828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150650283483614
mentalhealth,Jessisamess9,2020/04/05,"Sister (F24) has sobbed to my parents almost nightly since she was in high school and as much as my parents want to help her she essentially rejects all forms of help. How can I help? Since we were young, my sister has dealt with rather severe anxiety and depression. It manifests itself in obsessive tendencies and severe perfectionism and although she can function, she has sobbed and complained and yelled at my parents almost every single night for the last 10 years of life. Basically sobbing and getting mad at them when they don't help her is her only coping mechanism and it's hard because I can see as much as my parents want to help her, how burdening and draining it is on them. They've tried to get her to see a therapist but she doesn't trust people and instantly rejects them. They tried to get her to take medication but she claimed nearly immediately it made her feel worse and she didn't want it. She exercises but almost obsessively where it's unhealthy and she reads books and knows the ""steps"" of coping with anxiety and depression but she never implements them. I know nobody can make her change, and I really try to empathize with her and really do want her to be happy and successful, but I really resent how much stress and pressure she puts on my parents and how she gives up or rejects anything that could potentially help her. It makes me worried too since my parents won't be around forever and without them, I genuinely don't know how she would cope. Does anyone have any advice? 

Summary: My sister's only coping mechanism is sobbing and yelling to my parents, but refuses therapy and medication. I'm worried about her and want to help for her sake and my parents sake. What do I do?",6.055361087510621,7.376002280373832,6.421949872557353,75.00840484282075,66.69470404984423,9.699291985273296,32.34791843670349,9.910423181423305,3.3017028037383187,1376,57,239,31,22,444,151,321,0.19399999999999998,0.711,0.095,-0.9874,8,0,0,0,1,0,26.0,1,0,7,1,11,20,2,4,3,0,25,4,0,8,2,63,45,42,0,8,9,11,2,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,10,29,0,1,4,3,0,2,7,17,0,0,4,6,52,3,34,36,6,20,0,9,2,0,55,11,4,4,7,172,62,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975679324099135,0.0,0.0,0.214445904781489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048544385282278,0.0,0.10921896832385898,0.0,0.0,0.049914193046962416,0.0,0.05874393885607095,0.06354796434708995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04351575658309688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551607840617429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05699527515301973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296793981081044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06246967135154745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060145111527547875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03609450303095088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188746523302924,0.06847919047584798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599087496180018,0.06394711953492632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33493597328968444,0.07542238526269088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769432045168393,0.058188467309241876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050421479303976884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754640418136441,0.09530035333843387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14382616187917585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15742901153274422,0.0,0.05505666856250889,0.0,0.0,0.13398035267512684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858332576618454,0.0,0.0,0.6341185518686,0.0,0.0,0.049489510851407084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717618447637656,0.0,0.0,0.07140451987799856,0.0,0.13719356502611266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224563552691299,0.11376952748693887,0.0,0.0,0.161289918604621,0.0,0.17715173037695175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177150773825093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05367278792744192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08163519980166113,0.08288372156908028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14539759898891785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21052420841615951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881278736862079,0.0,0.0,0.14499027556026184,0.0727476194754904,0.0507099993795587,0.0,0.0,0.04596972965058522
mentalhealth,iamnotbinary,2020/04/05,"Texted a suicide chat hotline and waited ten minutes for a reply, but never received one. I could’ve been dead by the time they finally replied, which they still haven’t. This is messed up.",4.3258333333333345,6.396297694444449,3.84,88.90500000000002,72.05555555555556,5.911111111111111,28.66666666666667,6.42735559955562,1.2872333333333341,151,6,28,1,3,45,34,36,0.29600000000000004,0.7040000000000001,0.0,-0.9153,0,0,0,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,4,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,2,1,0,3,0,3,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547382894914206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4867101573365023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3426724123802338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010699360577848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3548194466413561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4859933099373202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25907555479269023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CrimsonDawn45,2020/04/05,I can't feel love I have been in denial for years and every time I work up the courage to bring it up to someone I trust they have told me it's just anxiety and I don't know what I am talking about and to not be so dramatic but when I tell my parents I love them I feel nothing all romantic relationships I try to form fall apart I can enjoy being around people but that is it I feel like I am unable to form deeper connections with anyone I hate it so much I desperately want intimacy and companionship but I can't have it I hate myself so much I feel like a horrible person for not being able to return my parents love to me or anyone elses affection sure I can say nice things but it feels wrong saying it without meaning or feeling it I accepted a long time ago that I would die alone but it still hurts I wish I could just have a normal life,1.2244568590937313,3.298016290502794,3.3185009310986966,88.98272967101181,81.62569832402234,6.435878336436996,21.117628801986346,7.594959193182576,0.7770965859714463,672,20,145,11,18,228,103,179,0.247,0.59,0.163,-0.9664,2,1,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,2,1,9,15,2,0,4,0,18,4,0,1,2,35,35,15,1,5,12,2,6,2,0,1,1,2,0,1,13,6,0,0,9,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,2,8,30,11,16,28,5,15,0,1,0,3,15,5,0,2,10,106,43,1,0.12530991286601892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107967698823046,0.0,0.0,0.12978327823680127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586174035419008,0.0,0.0,0.17523920935303594,0.1283948141716273,0.0,0.1115523896950655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004976886310428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005190567112626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104680352782741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557900616184626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3801627425199564,0.17904285357917685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474351919276052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414685344433627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886705097382809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885100973116612,0.12244018755629782,0.0,0.0,0.110895329613433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3392912663616726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649923097085376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842344085997864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277710879499187,0.12023824102198433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782836576186722,0.0,0.0,0.08687411559182609,0.10941578248594858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453595049235628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19930294456535966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10617468252534057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007265828421603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810310989431907,0.0,0.0,0.10071936130657023,0.10952638710288566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325033802192773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613843581560176,0.0,0.0,0.11973899178182225,0.0,0.0850772052773151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391103327626902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410021556314587,0.12079428430817366,0.0,0.09122710900032098,0.0,0.0,0.08901656678297838,0.1370067182393121,0.0,0.08069547543884019
mentalhealth,_mark_davis_,2020/04/05,"Children's Book for children with Anxiety Hey everyone, I'm a local author and a soon-to be elementary teacher, and have deal with a severe anxiety disorder all my life. I just finished my first children's book and I wanted to share!

Bark! Bark! Goes Anxious Mark, by Mark Davis.

A young pup struggles with understanding the feelings that overwhelm him. Mom comes to the rescue and teaches Mark about what anxiety is and how to cope with the scary feelings.

Now available on Amazon in paperback and Kindle eBook form.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0863S7M57

(Note: I do not make a profit off of this. All proceeds go towards my special needs classroom I work in (toys, STEM materials, stickers, etc), which is severely underfunded).",5.1147657142857135,8.450162128000002,4.978542857142859,75.27170000000002,75.72,7.411428571428572,32.128571428571426,8.418075326091056,3.182417142857142,586,29,88,12,14,181,89,125,0.196,0.7290000000000001,0.07400000000000001,-0.9214,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,2,8,0,5,1,0,2,2,22,14,7,0,2,2,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,4,11,0,0,3,3,1,2,1,2,0,1,0,2,8,3,16,13,4,13,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,0,5,56,12,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4597970727452206,0.2263362416981653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17258208369874678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20655001674744272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22961619423867025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22344100772672532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914411238217536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026039626696024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17041592790255394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386239975341515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415117352064556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133733862560895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346451857210265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14855552209850176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4526724833963306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094472561777552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085693599044878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11817045611189154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14585574849213315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,uwuvelvet,2020/04/05,"How can I get help when my parents don’t believe in mental illness? I feel lost and anxious all the time. I don’t really know what’s wrong with me but when times get really stressful I have a really hard time breathing and my heart starts to beat really fast. I also pull out my hair everyday. I really want to stop this habit, I’ve had it since elementary school, but when I asked my mom about therapy she said that I don’t need it and that it’s “only for crazy people”, which isn’t true. She also doesn’t know the extent of the hair pulling. I don’t know anymore, I feel I can’t really go to anyone I know because I’m embarrassed it.",2.2355359565807333,3.710131970149257,4.1310583446404365,87.14209633649935,76.31343283582089,7.857801899592942,21.883310719131615,8.575989854853784,1.2041880597014925,500,13,109,10,11,170,81,134,0.183,0.759,0.057999999999999996,-0.9351,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,7,5,0,2,4,0,10,5,4,1,2,19,26,11,0,2,2,2,5,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,9,5,0,1,6,0,0,3,7,4,0,0,3,6,19,1,9,23,2,15,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,10,63,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262355163989281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15979858298020355,0.14028069421975076,0.09890534248526063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223694124981053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862267933352546,0.0,0.0,0.1593660559048318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430430491284373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14780389294976154,0.0,0.08038946833616488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671169005170732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16761929306779838,0.0948111581285748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109495546191068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15440971775960113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14254863847167012,0.0,0.0,0.16566488822126038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10488360921395172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757933132354493,0.0,0.0,0.15706382473671518,0.0,0.0,0.09806383157554256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5437001264516008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455163231941766,0.0,0.0,0.14315526083195865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700915441227885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011925426982267,0.0,0.0,0.1182587891189154,0.1620308470333976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16176075184946487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474424319414215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343105503177432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465370381741006,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elisha37,2020/04/05,"stimming or something else? i am diagnosed with ADD, BPD, persistent depressive disorder, GAD, and gender dysphoria. ive been described by a friend as a very physical person. i apparently have certain movements i do when something makes me uncomfortable, when im excited, and when im nervous. ive also noticed that whenever i experience negative thoughts my immediate response is to shake my head to ""dislodge"" the thought. or if im in an unpleasent situation i have to squirm and move around to get more comfortable. does this all fall under the umbrella of stimming or is there something else to it?",6.606565420560749,8.63872399065421,7.3813901869158896,65.96404789719628,66.10280373831776,11.331308411214955,42.34696261682243,11.20814326018867,5.7509261682243,485,31,74,16,8,161,76,107,0.141,0.759,0.10099999999999999,-0.5372,1,0,3,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,6,7,0,2,5,0,9,2,1,1,2,15,13,12,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,3,0,0,3,0,10,4,12,10,2,10,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,4,3,52,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13241253485864185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739937772381673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20853948690405605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14261194669505745,0.16805801717800264,0.0,0.0,0.18976654394497894,0.0,0.14489827925150675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766380693818192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619668945631608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792502461714475,0.0,0.08650758483448265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993062795603725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.53655742542209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105244906211404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598303472921295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18851146263380167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14457617892077052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18611642402257872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3824097204411937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26290061159379324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13661905462043344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wildewTeam,2020/04/05,Halp pls I got permabanned from a sub and now I have an existential crisis Everytime I'm have nothing to take my mind off of it,0.8633333333333333,3.1244908888888894,3.653333333333337,84.90000000000002,84.55555555555556,8.044444444444443,23.814814814814817,8.841846274778883,2.036837037037037,102,4,22,3,3,36,24,27,0.155,0.795,0.049,-0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,4,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4509751573450002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.569343928716464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5410446429548954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42395706459636223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wonkdoggles,2020/04/05,"this has to be a named phenomenon, plz help I'm getting on in years. Bla bla bla, I've made some personal and weighed choices about my life expectancy and things like that.

It's my birthday tomorrow (well, 'today' or whatever now). I have been 'systematically' (recklessly) eroding relationships and pushing people away in preparation since about July of last year. I've managed to not be invited to a single thing in 30 days! Woo hoo!

So anyways, this whole covid thing happened. To me, this represented a 'window of opportunity'. Myself and a couple of friends over the years have often joked/lamented about not having Cancer, as our conditions were just as terminal, but without all the public support and understanding. ""Instead of having Cancer, have you tried not having Cancer?"", etc. So here I am, staring down the barrel of the perfect opportunity to get out of this awful, nightmarish contract by way of global pandemic...

*When suddenly it* ***occurs*** **(THIS IS WHERE I THINK THE PHENOM LIES)** *to me... ""I will just end up recovering, but I might pass it on to people I care about, people with a purpose in this world...""*

I've always been very good with pain, thanks to (afaik) issues with proprioception/ADD, but that is vastly outweighed by my pride. Something in me is just deeply triggered by the notion that I have to *suffer more* in order to *end my suffering.* I've done my best to research peaceful exits, where I 'get to have this one thing', but my mind always picks out direct ways any given approach could negatively impact another life. I don't mean indirect stuff like 'you will be missed', but rather things like the impact I would have on the conductor and whatnot. Do they butterfly effect spiral out and their kid doesn't go to college or something?

I know, if I know anything, that I am not the only person who struggles with a resolute-but-argumentative mind on the matter, because no one is special or interesting, certainly not me. I am curious as to what this brand of 'cold feet' is called. 

**tl;dr** qualities:

\- committed to suicide, likely in the near future

\- has formulated many plans (something I learned from a very young age is something of a threshold)

\- always manages to find a (seemingly) altruistic reason for not following through

\- does not fear pain or mutilation; no history of aversion to, or outbursts from

\- feels spited/used by the very nature of existence and reality, *evolution's automaton*, etc.

\- greatest fear is reincarnation

My actual diagnoses are Bipolar (II) and I have some (manageable) anxiety beyond 'normal' levels, but never had a full blown panic attack. *Although I am sure more than a handful of prideful psychs\* out there might need to reinvent the me-wheel, as they always do, and my friends in the industry make it seem as if BPD is all the rage in diagnoses these days... I am anecdotally/empirically certain it really is little more than type II bipolar... sad most of the time, every couple years I get between 1 and 4 (contiguous) months in which I can effortlessly do whatever I set out to do from losing weight to quitting smoking to going vegan by way of hypomania. Seems cut and dry to me after all these years, but psychs these days visually recoil if you tell them what you have been diagnosed with previously, because OBVIOUSLY. Can't be the next Freud if you aren't adversarial and dismissive towards patients, right? Sane until proven crazy. Last doc told me (his attempt at prescribing) Lexapro would* ***""help with the crying""****. LOLOLOLOL*",3.99236413043478,7.019364427884617,5.031828316610927,75.09433110367897,77.79807692307692,7.912263099219621,28.594760312151607,8.75844404241081,2.923784308807134,2769,122,444,67,69,904,337,624,0.09300000000000001,0.763,0.14400000000000002,0.986,0,0,4,0,0,1,157.0,1,5,4,11,22,36,3,4,29,1,54,16,2,6,10,96,81,39,1,11,28,0,3,4,2,6,12,0,1,3,30,24,2,0,13,0,0,6,16,14,1,2,9,5,47,22,94,61,16,74,0,5,1,0,25,37,0,19,30,329,77,9,0.0,0.0,0.07067939252622528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410639756722987,0.0,0.0,0.04925360198256079,0.07594719388108041,0.05540730986177635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059602167510834164,0.0,0.0,0.08239743706985017,0.06804859839143966,0.0,0.0,0.08830301351024858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760088384129495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912206755922138,0.0,0.07395720353890449,0.0,0.07384529049824477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057827956435122424,0.16028066366513288,0.07955888355368235,0.14013042737156312,0.0,0.0,0.22053903689786675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338233167108948,0.07411910832498833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282996244769514,0.0,0.16155298784777994,0.0,0.0,0.06102381083103418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630035315652707,0.036621831252105705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619798512086804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11191556423168277,0.0,0.15136280326771578,0.0,0.08232513391713625,0.06074926667725743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06404794304868916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970940777607097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559613482403085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960919587888235,0.11807716143316503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231623939902387,0.14153887434966178,0.07259199895048259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102853448261667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853323381389377,0.048346329290549474,0.07343074074177372,0.0,0.07889545045137182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366956895379216,0.14626349877709774,0.0,0.05781143052541615,0.0,0.0,0.05370452966639865,0.05586102747197727,0.0,0.07702812216400855,0.0,0.07096417492320017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815833058920888,0.05508484532384035,0.15413724220870495,0.0849787876446347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063760652934016,0.12648287297034638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770362158378751,0.0,0.0,0.046399305206786284,0.07446816528191387,0.0,0.07776069022882874,0.0,0.06185321461601655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19780750752727466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059913285321407064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22303480630648734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571759180709374,0.08291286359670423,0.07922460243890872,0.08219056678469266,0.06826264139766304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330536505834672,0.06668207742581214,0.0,0.0,0.2405901070560395,0.04640901168282574,0.0,0.0,0.04223341640801141,0.0,0.06865338438542175,0.06920816788511527,0.0,0.049173935895146834,0.0,0.0,0.07540022220826828,0.08712210471278165,0.0,0.0,0.17928234090715658,0.0,0.17247019971577288,0.0,0.08819793203113135,0.06512157380618691,0.0,0.0,0.0808634040319408,0.0,0.06981811842206913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290170990746901,0.0,0.0,0.2332066576072625
mentalhealth,bangkokbbkboy,2020/04/05,"What's my disorder? Hello everyone!, First of all, im sorry for my English.  
My symptoms :  
\-overthinking about little possibility things such as fear someone in walkway listening and recording me in front of my door when im in my condominium (when im talking about illegal, bad topics) 

​

or overthink about fear when i have sex, my telephone is on streaming. 

​

or after i have sex, maybe im feeling anxiety about maybe i forget to close the curtain.

It's OCD or anxiety symptoms?  
Thank you!",3.588448616600793,6.673535967391306,4.730513833992095,76.04373517786561,80.63043478260869,7.2584980237154175,33.36363636363636,8.296473431620573,3.4195956521739133,407,23,63,9,11,133,60,92,0.23800000000000002,0.722,0.04,-0.9568,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,1,8,4,0,2,1,0,3,4,0,0,1,8,6,8,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,0,2,11,1,14,6,1,12,0,0,0,2,5,6,0,3,5,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773993022530538,0.3110942732606937,0.0,0.0,0.19585582720443664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688367314986524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467114701067336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12231980765947452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28809548407605257,0.06472610808497843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888592329075443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5530945342552603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283004538420894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572081140507656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431294594641575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846313762579256,0.0,0.0,0.14329761310343164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26610447670883,0.0,0.1028902341607582,0.0,0.11785514823336005,0.0,0.0,0.08504468914339365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110942732606937,0.0
mentalhealth,fuckthisimfalling,2020/04/05,"does anyone else get triggered by better help ads? i always get better help adds about anxiety and other things and i hate them because they always include breathing getting faster, the room being engulfed in flames, or rapid threatening texts. idk how to explain it really, it’s just that they show vivid enactments of people having panic attacks, along with devices like speeding up beats and others that feel as though there designed to raise my heart rate and trigger a panic attack. idk if i explained any of this at all well i just wanna know if anyone feels the same cause i feel a little stupid for always getting upset at these harmless therapy ads.

i’ve included some links but if u are prone to panic attacks i would be careful 

[woman has a panic attack, fire engulfs room](https://youtu.be/H81ZJxB7pBE)

[visual representation of self hatred, clones yell at woman](https://youtu.be/6rmPhhMsSpo)",5.731879297173414,9.18689716883117,4.646837280366693,77.88185255920553,74.06493506493507,5.961191749427044,26.591291061879296,7.285733465282438,1.85736256684492,740,27,103,9,17,218,115,154,0.262,0.657,0.081,-0.9861,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,3,3,7,17,6,5,5,0,6,2,2,4,1,30,18,12,0,5,7,0,4,1,0,1,0,1,1,2,9,7,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,11,1,0,0,6,10,6,18,15,3,9,0,0,1,0,9,7,0,5,3,66,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817903457944278,0.0,0.0,0.07676628577167541,0.0,0.08635740761040983,0.0,0.0,0.15786489766941314,0.11566494893076912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5136960503475358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881419933539061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996768171002793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509470262271995,0.1159649193053179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987872153525084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430168762490583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17123551477777954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23591290267390974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145145940133253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337703398151154,0.15133008389427013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06203914064046924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05515035062803381,0.1131413320419287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5297891430696439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826087220238191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07231760073857146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177646174174762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290948693769938,0.0,0.07499637861466983,0.0,0.11090982756897803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149798478651452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019090737716746,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AndrewRushx,2020/04/05,"I dont really know what's happening, I'm just looking for some sort of support When I was 5, my family got this little miniature poodle puppy. I'm now 16, and a few months ago she passed away in my arms. Not like a peaceful death, more like a violent one. She started wheezing and then started shaking in my arms. When she stopped moving, I did cpr, and I was able to bring her back long enough for her to let out a Yelp of pain and die again in my arms. I handled the situation surprisingly well at the time, but now a few months later, whenever I sit down to relax or anything I relive those moments in my head and it's almost as if I cant get them out. Now I'm just stuffing my life full of mundane shit because every time I have a moment to catch my breath, it's almost like it's just playing in repeat in my head and I cant get it out. Its causing me a great deal of emotional stress, and I'm not posting this to ask for pity. That's the opposite of what I want, im posting this in hopes that someone can maybe help me get my life back on track. Thank you. 
-Andrew",3.9415413533834567,3.8903092192982482,5.252656641604009,86.41026315789475,70.84210526315789,8.093233082706766,28.56641604010025,7.7094869923839395,1.5226205513784463,834,28,187,9,14,280,130,228,0.124,0.738,0.139,0.6703,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,1,0,12,17,2,2,10,0,9,11,7,1,0,27,28,14,2,3,8,0,0,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,13,10,0,1,1,2,0,5,5,6,1,1,4,1,29,11,28,23,6,46,0,1,1,0,10,16,1,7,25,121,42,0,0.12759701451394612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310705460330095,0.0,0.25553995737031515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050014709747483,0.0,0.11928598423969496,0.0,0.1198815953727226,0.1962284561351175,0.0,0.07778195573503068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107728212110048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13154691919777262,0.0,0.0,0.1324255560948922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14954275071736758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352946723955706,0.0,0.13184182482487028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750598794211014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12028710944026574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199992521132926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205098871590866,0.14067615895865776,0.0,0.0,0.1128336185390709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619026972617744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552558919906661,0.0,0.0,0.1267326259422065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378266714326842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012398222665349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047659230273498,0.18025108968644696,0.1870123683520788,0.12788572948144078,0.0,0.11291934260095693,0.1071493560624336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281883512836688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036934392770108,0.13561543325732148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646303927134072,0.0,0.13577221970126446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444053376635961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174191480592133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13097650178019712,0.0,0.143424390419013,0.0,0.0,0.10811253632970387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806276472224012,0.0,0.0,0.10667681754975987,0.14616194902041402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14479557997739395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174741877648929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14880569054218293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526002508497688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147250398334476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,questionsaboutu,2020/04/05,"Bored but I don't want to do anything With this whole quarantine thing I have Netflixed myself out and I've played video games to the point where I don't really want to play anymore. I went on a run today and gardened but now at the end of the day I'm getting that dark cloud of boredom. Anyone else experiencing this right now? I got laid off and my boyfriend is still working so on his days off he wants to relax and play games which I understand, but I'm so bored when I'm alone. Any advice? Activities or a way to change my mindset. I do realize how lucky I am right now to be healthy and have a safe place to be.",2.087244755244757,3.677253738461541,3.360629370629372,92.01800699300699,77.0,6.573426573426572,23.356643356643357,7.348242739294969,0.6985384615384618,486,15,111,6,11,158,82,130,0.096,0.721,0.183,0.9444,0,2,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,9,8,0,0,6,0,10,0,0,1,0,19,20,13,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,1,2,9,0,2,2,2,0,0,2,1,12,6,16,16,1,23,0,0,0,0,4,11,0,2,9,68,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19298934840591667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20454475001872446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430303844425204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958614844959404,0.13809275261638326,0.20235646321491305,0.1625211532225105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20892300360524105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25473523988703856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649813202649255,0.0,0.17492151543162354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318272962803557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157954400254026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20633972726307892,0.0,0.18669614680075985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652003955324956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3373184630604976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15771936994152716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13120657615536294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872017020340555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20559874880882176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3494621348106738,0.1567619485719148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18307938838625096,0.0,0.22049556627919514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14377835464561692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pserenity,2020/04/05,"Just realized that I’ve been binge-watching the same TV show daily for the last 12+ months. Is this a symptom of my mental health issues? 38F, single mom, diagnosed bi-polar since about 2000.

I suffered through childhood sexual abuse and I was raised by my mother who has borderline personality disorder. I got out of a terribly abusive relationship a little over a year ago, which has brought back a lot of the trauma for me. 

Today while I was working from home, I had Netflix running on my iPad, watching the same show I always watch, Forensic Files. My daughter, who has been out of school for nearly a month, asked “Don’t you ever watch anything else? I think I watched this episode already.” I told her I watch other stuff and she said that for the last month, I’ve been watching the same show every day over and over and that’s so weird. 

It got me thinking. I went on my laptop and pulled up my Netflix viewing history. It seems that I have only watched Forensic Files and nothing else for over a year. We don’t have cable so Netflix is our only media source. I’ve cycled through the entire series at least 4 times now. 

I’m not sure if this is a conscious decision I’ve made because I really like the show or if I’m just compelled to do so because I’m somehow mentally stuck.  

When I was a teen, shortly after my abusive stepfather finally left our home I couldn’t stop eating toilet paper. My family doctor chalked it up to anemia-induced pica. 

Is this just me being an oddball or an I missing a sign of bigger issues?",3.828196767001117,5.57968191304348,4.817913879598663,82.71019300445934,72.6789297658863,6.990022296544037,28.846293199554072,7.645422480735847,1.8763945373467108,1208,49,222,15,24,394,171,299,0.127,0.8590000000000001,0.013999999999999999,-0.9849,0,0,0,0,2,0,32.0,3,1,0,1,12,7,0,0,20,0,21,5,0,2,2,35,37,15,0,3,8,3,0,1,0,0,4,1,2,1,16,9,1,1,6,8,0,4,4,5,0,0,15,9,33,2,30,20,6,40,0,2,8,0,16,16,0,7,21,149,49,6,0.0,0.39745043753831294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911799037179816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339155343548425,0.0,0.09303973137298956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920149041596209,0.0,0.10453271088022384,0.0,0.0,0.08597947446376948,0.0,0.13632378929296954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721119627184547,0.0,0.0,0.11349071793361415,0.0,0.0,0.1281506331785722,0.11444824427108558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441551316503595,0.18681556303653132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114382354476506,0.09420966282898624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541001706010067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224887807708246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17885867424366142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885500293237512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243207970695276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23341336032474186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18228965734740785,0.0,0.0,0.12148823094719408,0.0,0.0,0.054627568518281565,0.11206884086840943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950618236023112,0.0,0.10580284584428984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253681228693725,0.0,0.0,0.13095735351835674,0.2677509960435481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729030853413216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700819609353758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763327342151083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163208654952632,0.0,0.0,0.12004835994414167,0.0,0.0,0.10636246382270292,0.0,0.0,0.1131635936985317,0.0,0.10179293587976276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09249521346241617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09348304411140224,0.0,0.0,0.1280023783709487,0.0,0.0,0.10538510037821652,0.1162194651756953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143294143165572,0.0,0.0,0.06520071207830043,0.0,0.105988336469641,0.10684482127020398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036543984702022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140325896427368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14401146230272366
mentalhealth,silveryfeather208,2020/04/05,"How do I not get paranoid over every ailment? I was gonna see a therapist but then COVID happened. But for some reason, even before COVID, I started thinking every pain was something seriously wrong. COVID just amplified it because I thought, well now I can't go see a doctor. I don't know if my pain is legit or if it's just me amplifying it...",1.9972670807453448,4.290915724637685,3.987619047619052,84.03000000000002,80.15942028985508,6.2616977225672885,27.248447204968944,7.447530270364453,1.6861577639751557,271,12,52,4,7,92,50,69,0.215,0.727,0.057,-0.9198,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,2,0,6,3,0,2,0,14,16,7,0,2,8,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,4,1,0,3,2,8,1,2,12,1,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,4,3,35,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394664606721154,0.0,0.18697582941839694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22490511080861608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14513097687584167,0.0,0.37026753521195865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148009509023642,0.0,0.12487881372196448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194308366562824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207590133132474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4676208842070661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22592119072206845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3501960629462273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691605024189624,0.0,0.0,0.15552750830071793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551258989728637,0.0,0.14079545453988546,0.0,0.17444273968304153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975655428100363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402425525401549,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Frosty-Fact,2020/04/05,"Could use some advice... Because I love my brother, I want to help him. He has no confidence in himself, he thinks lowly of himself and he is always comparing himself to me. Things like ‘I don’t have confidence like you’, ‘I still don’t know what I want to do with my life, you know your path and I dont’. How can I help my brother gain confidence in himself as a person? Btw when we younger I would hit him a lot because he would provoke me, but I realize now it was because he wanted my attention and I was horribly bad at expressing affection back then. In fact our relationship was so bad that he would always stay out till very late and not tell my parents or I and we never talked (even though we always slept in the some room). We didn’t hate each other or anything, it just wasn’t a good relation. In the passed 2.5 years we have mended this relationship a lot and are now very close. I want to help him, any advice?",3.3329564553093998,4.560217914438502,4.511264323911384,86.50958556149733,73.06417112299465,7.909702062643241,26.72612681436211,8.418075326091056,1.6760148204736445,718,25,152,12,14,236,106,187,0.11800000000000001,0.713,0.16899999999999998,0.5362,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,6,3,0,1,10,7,1,0,6,0,19,3,1,4,2,43,31,16,0,8,5,3,0,2,0,3,1,0,1,1,7,15,0,0,5,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,6,0,33,4,15,20,5,21,0,0,0,1,35,9,0,6,12,108,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25248281173838183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3224852848121613,0.0,0.0,0.08785253966475684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631104273764627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09933790256871604,0.21573382971446312,0.236256142231184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031464224331698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15140783852868647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532771746974663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10835709766482278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754679556690646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597767769565138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14199712827307995,0.0,0.1457301382790452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912495849880598,0.12622984992357913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21966270973173044,0.11659757167425792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09963805557679953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434484258742172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280232477691808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773999808219454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13769764158375578,0.10317002030776833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10383673952052158,0.11291635273191775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582703019597464,0.0827787080650712,0.1269269436155284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157729565463743,0.0,0.21318791359750944,0.3047946535975464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753151907880181,0.0,0.0,0.08319309172466821
mentalhealth,johnfarmer88,2020/04/05,"Just why? Honestly I just feel I'm apparently not handling life and relationships in the correct way I should.  Because apparently to a ""friend"" I know my way of trying to find a relationship is soo wrong.  I look for someone who I can be friends with first then I try to move it further.  Which apparently is so wrong.  Aslo like I'm honestly a more docile,  quiet person.  I more would rather be out of people's way than try and be an instigator. 

For when I try to get into a relationship with a perspective partner I'm not one to advance for sex that isn't my first thought when I try to find someone.  I try and find someone who will like me for me. 

I could mostly just care less about the sexual stuff really.  I just want someone who I know is willing to support me for who I am faults and all.   Apparently to someone I know they think I'm stupid with how I handle trying to find a partner.   I'm a 22 year old Male who has medical issues that affect me daily they aren't going away anytime soon. I'm not trying to find someone who is with me out of pity. I'm trying to find someone who will love me for me faults and all .   Like how most guys my age are looking for their next lay I'm not.  Even though I've never actually had sex. Honestly that's not the most important thing to me.   

Apparently that's stupid and just so invalid. While yes I'd like to have sex that's ultimately not the reason for me to get with someone.  

I just feel like I'm doing life so wrong...",2.2819307182883333,4.003168410596029,4.1002649006622525,86.3539938869078,76.81456953642385,7.1627101375445745,24.529291900152828,8.012643519586192,1.2957678043810492,1148,39,246,19,26,388,131,302,0.077,0.79,0.133,0.9441,5,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,3,3,18,21,2,0,12,1,22,7,0,4,4,55,47,16,0,5,13,0,2,5,4,5,3,1,0,5,16,14,0,0,14,0,0,3,9,8,0,3,2,5,32,13,37,36,8,24,0,1,2,4,21,6,0,3,17,162,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0718701132932694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919499872648592,0.0,0.0,0.04489531784504146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508934647838128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588021717782647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048644005111802766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07447758298486319,0.05261435759156432,0.0,0.0,0.4038792513948934,0.12529040641720074,0.0,0.0,0.1138009820560745,0.0,0.07695639018969479,0.0,0.041856024012322884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292339230456713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686968690796879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142553272960868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403993942959604,0.17990418726253174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369204018736105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647046283122887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419291032740738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827648357829059,0.0,0.0,0.056802106379165475,0.0,0.07832579863559204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728149798877254,0.0,0.049905991605028566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05105845546834861,0.06430685158098992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047180984481486325,0.07572271470170333,0.0,0.23721212435867065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4992156996504695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430967906173614,0.0,0.08357521386820217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04892865553404845,0.04719085448047329,0.07235907718085123,0.058468520666805024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4500212290723862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043439673318655184,0.17537576866816051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645613215006811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05231763661789289,0.24156855149883175,0.0,0.047427088162252384
mentalhealth,iliketomakesongs,2020/04/05,"I’m almost done I just moved to a big city after my girlfriend of almost three years and I broke up. I hate sounding like a sob story but I’m just really alone and not above asking strangers for help I guess. I’m in an awful place mentally and have some awful thoughts that I promised myself and her I wouldn’t act on but damn bro life doesn’t feel worth it ya know? Especially with the state of the world right now I find it hard to find a reason to keep going a lot of the time, it’s all just so overwhelming and numbing at the same time it’s hard to explain. I love making music but the reality of that being a pipe dream is tough too bc I never really developed a passion for another career. I’m kind of drawing a blank but thank you for listening and any advice would be greatly appreciated.",2.532129870129868,4.2460066848484885,4.167640692640696,86.1743181818182,76.0909090909091,7.138528138528137,22.69480519480519,7.957251820313856,1.067207792207792,633,18,132,10,14,212,108,165,0.17600000000000002,0.672,0.152,-0.109,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,0,6,14,2,1,13,2,8,4,0,2,2,34,25,11,0,2,8,1,3,1,1,2,2,2,0,0,6,7,0,1,7,1,1,3,4,7,0,1,2,5,14,7,18,19,4,18,0,3,0,2,10,8,2,5,7,82,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619260489508042,0.0,0.0,0.3318613758995802,0.17162150905084134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268580653282816,0.17375725737631956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549128021413663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957483645668436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378596539627346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30290468286296635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417457546211797,0.0,0.0,0.18269152170450892,0.1825439125126269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2968801725819773,0.16360043299807306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106928246487058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472871643446469,0.0,0.17255736720673884,0.0910677197600498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1170430942509262,0.080955613243715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140877370795215,0.14955619329868758,0.0,0.11061008514537098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16699273908163412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17611932293145344,0.0,0.0,0.127802732816597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17312756923258554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21231109682661728,0.17037343317111295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415120741447864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15255988138030308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155210609763918,0.1932490781997467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771283426779525,0.0,0.0,0.1067092730014106
mentalhealth,FromNinetyFour,2020/04/05,How are you guy’s holding up in these strange times ?? Just wondering how my fellow human is holding up in these strange times. Especially the ones that are suffering mentally of just feel lonely.,5.665619047619046,8.206470800000005,5.48,76.55333333333336,69.57142857142857,9.23809523809524,34.52380952380953,9.725611199111238,3.82252380952381,158,8,26,4,3,49,26,35,0.23600000000000002,0.764,0.0,-0.8205,0,2,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,8,5,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,2,0,5,5,0,6,0,2,0,0,4,4,0,1,2,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22073922611439464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4322657244722378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4399525364094264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958261942416797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5091264601103409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4734336422602637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AztecClient,2020/04/05,Life just sucks right now I honestly just wish my mom could work from home. School is going good for me but knowing that she risks her health by working alongside doctors and nurses to treat sick patients fills me up with a type of sadness I’ve never felt before. I’m also missing my friends. I’m close to college and it pains me to think of not graduating with them. Life just sucks right now. Stay safe everyone!,3.6027513227513204,5.669809839506176,3.636437389770727,89.60111111111117,74.06172839506173,6.110052910052911,26.386243386243386,6.868970318607317,1.0738169312169314,331,12,65,3,7,101,63,81,0.221,0.611,0.168,-0.75,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,2,6,11,2,1,1,0,2,6,0,0,1,17,12,4,0,2,5,1,1,0,1,0,6,0,1,0,2,5,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,1,1,9,5,11,10,0,10,0,2,0,0,5,4,2,0,3,36,11,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16685761012075245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754608067363395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16659032704957033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135624752768726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993743516670496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20033705747554306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16120274341883506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858080268703487,0.17500601486998493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217855659293044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20929331412361615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466877610049372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947518265337338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24436876905550325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16092401339345416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220186841538751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35637251900850936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21116529428132486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2223935120993168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369471983612388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399376061670316,0.0,0.0,0.3037998807362509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fuck6969420,2020/04/05,A game for y'all Im finna call this guess the mental illness (i have no idea myself) so there is many places to start but what really sticks out to me right now is my paranoia it started as a horrible fear of the dark i sed to run to light switches so i can feel safe again but as the years went by it got worse i have weeks where i think everything is whatching me and something is going to attack me so i usually wind up holding up in my bedroom with a knife until im so tired my mind eases. Then theres hatred for authority amoung other things that is set off by the smallest of thing's.then theres the normal homicidal/suicidal thoughts i go between evrey once and a while.if i have been through the above a lot a go into a state of drunk like psychosis maybe i start stabbing inanimate objects. thats all i can think of right now,1.5579521963824303,3.8359975988372135,2.6808527131782967,92.86169250645996,81.73255813953489,5.682687338501292,23.50904392764857,6.937597516519254,0.7518167958656332,665,24,141,8,18,212,110,172,0.203,0.733,0.065,-0.9807,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,0,11,4,1,1,13,0,11,3,0,0,1,19,24,12,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,8,5,1,2,5,2,0,5,1,2,0,0,4,2,18,2,25,20,2,28,0,0,0,0,3,10,0,2,12,94,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740134072919356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561886563374315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747005204715704,0.0,0.0,0.17212185801510946,0.07734087204735425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26079106768590826,0.0,0.12233561081006065,0.0,0.16850203150240764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726725521132946,0.3304448148478642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472823993594202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004061787088994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550768306739281,0.1536682833782049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541471057242758,0.0,0.15444539714910405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986774241022455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289677629933882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598100244660116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798971281311496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2612529954825684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775562435633695,0.0,0.0,0.3247963664563479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16731276483826402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032388665393188,0.19602042342976572,0.0,0.12143268335140538,0.0,0.17580433700011092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16846317676415612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226948098503857,0.0,0.0,0.14179490263610728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558787033244075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850084307598557
mentalhealth,Dragon_Girl928,2020/04/05,"Any here have really bad luck with meds in general? I have been on 2 SSRIs and have bad side effects ranging from erratic behavior to feeling awful or losing my own ability to feel emotions + many more. 

Have taken beta blockers for a few days and had a lot of problems with low blood pressure and fatigue and it didn’t help with anxiety 

I have taken buspar and after a bit it made me sick and left me feeling really depressed so I couldn’t keep taking it. 

I have been on a variety of sleeping meds which produced different results with the worst sending me to the emergency room and the working ones slowly loosing effectiveness every time I took them or causing extreme morning drowsiness. 

Am also trying adhd treatment with a non stimulant blood pressure medication and am also experiencing a lot of side effects including fatigue and nausea along with just feeling unwell when it’s in effect, which is nearly all day because it’s long acting. 

I have also gotten a test to determine my drug response to anxiety and depression meds and no SSRIs made the complete safe list and a few of the sleeping meds I took made it into the safe list. I am also under 18 and am a around a 100 lb Asian female so I don’t know if that has anything to do with my negative responses to meds. 

Does anyone else have these issues or advice? I have been taking my non stimulant ADHD meds for 2 weeks so far and I don’t know if I want to keep taking them but other than that I am not on any meds.",9.891701268742793,7.039391062283741,10.09384948096886,65.58972462514421,60.52249134948097,12.539907727797,41.0383506343714,10.686352973137794,4.448619146482121,1183,49,204,21,12,399,154,289,0.13,0.818,0.052000000000000005,-0.951,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,7,11,15,0,2,16,1,25,9,4,12,1,63,45,28,0,5,8,0,4,0,0,0,5,1,1,0,12,24,0,5,10,0,0,4,7,12,0,1,13,6,22,3,34,31,9,26,0,6,0,0,4,15,0,8,7,151,34,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19810607783215484,0.08054004537007428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26364555060935496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11209709653910896,0.0,0.1261024232247419,0.0,0.0,0.05763010576940718,0.08444921371503633,0.0678247849544866,0.07337143371841373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376348141359153,0.050242576338159706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998148921599979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466822788054301,0.0,0.0,0.08641598994383791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10630839446489287,0.0,0.1419767594134103,0.0,0.0,0.08611154518467526,0.0,0.0,0.07212645437305883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558124137628657,0.0,0.06885148392440753,0.09271160832114543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944255585949641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16669647652408362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05524450887861821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602525381141983,0.0,0.1465176847778392,0.0,0.0,0.09059195019884653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954976602703872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729392651170929,0.0,0.09220709843248052,0.0,0.14014137822766953,0.0,0.23396389962586325,0.0,0.08356112550695655,0.0,0.0,0.640851672745447,0.08302965965718644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055850046581731434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788649805540616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560095476782187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16495940444500398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859091526704954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0480598693872328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18314370378945707,0.055957891579157516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04861355721659746,0.0,0.06611249636973608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06000287218979801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HiiiImRachel,2020/04/05,"Mental health struggles due to Covid-19 outbreak Hii guys, I just joined Reddit so I'm new to this whole thing! 

I'm currently at home in quarantine but I still do have school. For one of my assignments I have to design a tiny house which can be used for quarantine. 
I noticed that a lot of people (including myself) are having some trouble with staying inside and not being allowed to see people or not even being able to go and visit your therapist. This is why I'm asking here to what people currently miss, want or need these days when being in quarantine / lockdown. I'm doing this assignment for the people with disorders like me cuz we usually get overlooked by others so every reply would help me out. 

So it doesn't really matter what you want to tell me, every bit of information could help me a lot. But I especially would like to know what helps you getting trough these days or what is something you desperately need at this point.

Thanks for reading and stay strong! ❤️",5.534232825997531,6.825123245989307,5.92160427807487,78.22819827231594,67.87700534759358,8.962402303578775,28.28835870012341,9.265573868473778,2.4374338955162487,785,26,140,15,13,252,121,187,0.066,0.79,0.14400000000000002,0.9558,3,4,1,0,0,0,16.0,1,4,0,1,8,7,0,1,4,0,17,1,0,3,0,31,34,13,0,7,8,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,1,1,15,7,0,0,2,1,0,2,3,3,0,1,0,1,16,4,23,27,5,19,0,1,1,0,13,6,0,6,11,99,31,4,0.1298968704320436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214360390653881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418137395173094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371208123544083,0.0,0.0,0.16754547065739167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887306725220928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579565783380269,0.0,0.21888743149015927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573150701025766,0.0,0.07382338494108419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286183240846003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13807429901775656,0.0,0.0,0.2612014024262557,0.0,0.1302971521867788,0.0,0.0,0.149883548190912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138792289281151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692209909746482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208673481705572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309054933255152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19263376701618304,0.0,0.12545520690190087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14788844793754194,0.0,0.0,0.08802148116218257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602165376651522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279452893728347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299320223699679,0.0,0.08321526139823107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146256774016588,0.10351098792982992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000009570454928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769055611039912,0.10373580852165797,0.0,0.0,0.13579641260986622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135355901939299,0.11959158609888962,0.0,0.1508202783720165,0.08629770880952123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218918967802476,0.143063051089271,0.0,0.15323307938536587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721172139918624,0.14502521695270004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845500196632808,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heyyimdevin,2020/04/05,"It feels like all of the work I’ve put in towards mental wellness is coming crashing down and the amount of insecurity that has been sowed do in my life during 2019-2020 feel unfixable I was doing so good for so long. And this feels like it’s pushed me down a well of insecurity I will never climb up. I think I have a shit personality l, and nobody will ever truly like me. I don’t understand why I am so terrible but it has to be true based on empirical evidence. How can I not believe in a pattern so apparent in my life? I

I had original posted a Snapchat on my private story before I deleted it to come on here. I want people to know how I’m feeling so they can tell me that it’s all wrong but I feel so attention seeking and I’m not sure I’d believe them and I don’t know if it will be satisfying like I want it to be.

I’m going to turn into a shell of a person for awhile and everything is going to crumble around me and when I get back there will be nothing left. I feel like my life is crashing in around me.",2.1736422240128945,3.327676995433792,4.6286381950040285,84.82242546333605,75.84931506849315,7.527370400214881,25.21112006446414,8.124751697461798,1.3837239323126505,798,27,177,13,17,282,116,219,0.07,0.768,0.161,0.9401,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,2,2,18,15,1,2,8,0,24,4,1,3,6,39,45,19,0,3,5,0,6,5,0,4,3,0,0,2,10,12,0,0,11,0,0,7,5,5,2,0,3,6,27,10,27,34,3,30,0,0,0,0,5,16,1,1,11,126,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22188029170891996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958267503198827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106044281237187,0.2808130022782479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21470191599325947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272788052812145,0.0,0.0,0.11200236376632372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3780762583292385,0.2670902928825993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510993619686001,0.0,0.14165129347564015,0.10452715705499643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13697816246676026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540234394764428,0.0,0.2640729561829144,0.30442046788675786,0.0,0.0,0.11028669197964194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255898281244111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611629425648313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195783257779256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639731592554785,0.21763053038939875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935358270876514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252796939551666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279228587032282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745491309829514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892526276954936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985284956129275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13555312639676986,0.0,0.12973606596136614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701076031338198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22410058080441506,0.0,0.1124521177127784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907264183765309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13625477092923752,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,93nuggets,2020/04/05,"True Story of How I Lost A Toe [https://youtu.be/5xI2tV5tDvw](https://youtu.be/5xI2tV5tDvw)

​

21 yer old male

got dumped

got drunk

tried to kill myself..",18.900454545454547,19.469755409090904,11.762727272727272,49.9140909090909,40.36363636363636,10.618181818181819,31.09090909090909,8.841846274778883,2.186581818181818,137,2,18,1,1,35,21,22,0.405,0.502,0.094,-0.8519,0,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,1,2,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,0,2,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3318048237903306,0.3721082918488453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4898472189397942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388029700967504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3342910017887594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213414686145876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20791304289628915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721082918488453,0.0
mentalhealth,jad_19,2020/04/05,"Do I have something wrong with me? I live in the UK and people have started telling me my behaviour isn’t “normal” but I don’t want to see anyone and I didn’t know where else to ask. 
I guess the problem is I don’t ever feel happy, I look around and I see people smiling and talking about their lives and it makes me feel angry and worse about myself. It’s got to the point I hate every single part of my day until I can come home and get drunk enough that I’m not afraid to cry. 
I feel angry at myself that I can be entitled enough to be so unhappy with my fairly privileged lifestyle and that just makes it worse. 
Ive realised that I hate every aspect of who I am, I despise it completely. 
Ive become so unhappy I’ve started punishing myself without realising. I don’t feel like I value anything anymore.",2.499974337040207,4.146759874251496,4.253759623609923,85.81133233532937,76.0059880239521,6.687596236099231,24.503421727972626,7.447530270364453,1.171014029084688,637,21,128,8,14,215,93,167,0.27,0.596,0.134,-0.9851,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,8,10,4,1,3,0,16,1,0,2,1,28,37,12,0,3,4,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,9,12,1,0,5,1,0,1,7,7,0,0,2,7,29,3,16,33,4,11,0,0,3,0,5,5,0,1,6,90,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336326505102799,0.0942181184620306,0.0,0.110885162159391,0.11995324911376858,0.1259700991135838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14881729022503434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607246509360665,0.14127949044758312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14801306852584806,0.08690055978101835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125636884067644,0.0,0.0,0.27845899660989604,0.0,0.0,0.12188622460255474,0.22706003631002925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725281892626097,0.09626316422324484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07039965862898265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776935148852412,0.0,0.14843882774009046,0.0,0.0,0.14344050904414965,0.0,0.2660692011882385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351620598095121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405333533217548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583049614456991,0.0,0.2379678439471949,0.0,0.11315340263294588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988911434200508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202328661010654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14591768885941842,0.0,0.18683297520762315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273793109515565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893452096166008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21475155990297995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037346949672078,0.0,0.0,0.19074900348340795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830440002596477,0.11777467100971173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947717311193125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12989113829606008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746370685838262,0.0,0.14732450867385655,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lizmetin120,2020/04/05,What should I do? I’m 18 and I’ve been through eating disorders multiple times and have struggled with depression/anxiety for a very long time. I always find myself trying to give advice to ppl suffering from similar stuff because they ask my for advice. I had a friend recently get really upset about feeling lonely and they’ve always worried about being single forever. This person tells me what’s going on most of the time but this time they just told me they “can’t do this anymore”. Im worried about them but I don’t know how to help them. They just think everything in life is a distraction and that they are completely lost/alone in this life. Ive tried to reach out since quarantine and news media is putting us in this same boat where we are forced to be with our minds. I’ve tried to give them ways to cope with it and I tried to listen but they told me to forget about it. I don’t know what more I could do?,2.987574324324324,4.905436281081084,3.7809966216216218,88.54879222972973,75.37837837837839,7.435810810810811,22.37331081081081,8.278499904357787,1.1687905405405412,732,20,150,13,16,233,110,185,0.122,0.833,0.045,-0.9148,0,4,0,0,0,0,12.0,3,0,9,0,8,6,0,3,4,0,18,3,0,1,0,29,31,10,0,2,5,0,1,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,12,11,1,0,5,0,0,2,3,5,0,0,4,2,25,1,26,23,4,15,0,2,0,0,22,6,0,1,6,101,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524534568668773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378466131091185,0.0,0.0,0.2149651940766244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09881727939218668,0.0,0.1281052794791511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12075966982126587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874289131689056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543582754176853,0.0,0.0,0.1031344301317698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14804388042478553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217661223836474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609270157181327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531394033965507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806212586764475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997990301875834,0.0,0.06748775774082913,0.24782974612018546,0.07341220661663092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658219135112462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13952941278776346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198061900092088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18247795174091594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431437327561784,0.0,0.0,0.1410079994108379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304282869858848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11278920983366135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12985492122013848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275177260293984,0.0,0.12754312561471634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068535518089394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350400595728408,0.14787261153232809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290322453122008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08276908381254552,0.0,0.0,0.3012881382827148,0.0,0.0,0.24686139353041464,0.0,0.35080097368281904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553796671254286,0.0,0.0,0.10658156367035343,0.0,0.10253181367017412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623636679428085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spookyxspiice,2020/04/05,Anyone have any advice when you have absolutely no more will to live anymore? I just don’t have anymore fight left in me. My depression and anxiety are consuming me. I just want the pain to stop.,1.5818421052631564,4.289735605263161,3.2108421052631577,85.57889473684213,87.68421052631578,7.2505263157894735,23.389473684210525,8.238735603445708,1.8988778947368432,155,6,30,4,5,51,31,38,0.353,0.618,0.028999999999999998,-0.9286,0,0,0,0,1,1,4.0,0,1,0,0,3,3,1,0,1,0,6,1,0,0,0,5,7,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,3,6,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29060913421875506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022375330432262,0.0,0.2275049378718489,0.0,0.5898681653294844,0.20794419801513525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561442754516144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32311851644771195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26260359085249674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31644726841919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24863398117486504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17541017898729144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SuperbRoll1,2020/04/05,"I don’t how how to seek help I’ve been looking to get some help for a few years now, but my experience has been atrociously bad. The best i’ve gotten was to see a counselor but she doesn’t actually help, at this point she’s just someone to talk to, but she has talked to me about my personal life and has told me that it’s apparent that i’m struggling with some emotional trauma

I’ve considered checking into the local mental health center because i’m so desperate. I can’t get better in the environment i’m in currently, i barely even feel safe here. I try so hard to reach out but as soon as they’re aware of my age they just stop, i guess cause they assume i can take care of it myself but i really can’t. I don’t know where to go or what to do and all i want is someone or somewhere i can go to get better, if anyone can reach out and at least point me in the wrong direction it would be highly appreciated please",6.963179487179486,4.754919882051278,7.8066666666666675,77.68333333333334,65.56410256410257,11.333333333333336,31.92307692307693,9.994966539143718,2.668076923076923,727,20,161,13,9,247,113,195,0.11699999999999999,0.6829999999999999,0.19899999999999998,0.9415,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,3,12,9,0,1,6,0,18,2,0,3,1,31,36,17,0,3,10,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,7,7,0,2,3,0,1,2,5,4,0,0,5,4,22,5,25,29,6,22,0,0,2,0,12,14,0,7,6,106,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.14618538998096867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10474521857965303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12507862425691904,0.09131806319430907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15720822276839214,0.26497583897665355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152733381030947,0.15388817906364533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16850737212466949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894297548256496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653534852111813,0.0,0.0,0.07574452031997699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347964834597319,0.0,0.17027214548351702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16502407085967333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419339479099684,0.0,0.0,0.15923279018327818,0.0,0.0,0.30122787806273216,0.1582743053204609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232740074348845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580976168111997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579616410611946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15096543745523314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080154943481434,0.0,0.164437889345388,0.2832230994619847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09596715936661848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11937300091289832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2538539261801204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12524139145538948,0.0,0.15660584070007064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126326513572956,0.2408107535798346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1431424726577832,0.0,0.10170589670905744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835725023586663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641522270405993,0.1637852476262506,0.0,0.09646773966209864
mentalhealth,throwaway394000,2020/04/05,"How do you know if you actually have some sort of mental illness or your brain is just trying to trick into thinking it as an excuse for bad habits and stuff like that? The past couple of months I have really been wondering if I have a mental illness. It would provide an explanation for a lot of things that I think are wrong with my head. When reading things about it, I see many similarities between it and my brain. But at the same time, maybe there’s nothing wrong. Maybe my brain is just trying to blame something other than myself but then I feel guilty so doesn’t that defeat the purpose?. I think that subconsciously, my brain might be doing it as a weird way to get attention. But that also doesn’t make any sense because if I thought for sure I had something I would probably never tell anyone so that still doesn’t make sense. I don’t really know how to explain it any better than that. Is this a common feeling with other people or is it just me?",5.43452380952381,6.026704476190478,5.723928571428572,82.07732142857142,67.73015873015873,8.204761904761906,26.86111111111111,8.07648339933343,1.5430031746031756,762,21,149,9,12,243,109,189,0.125,0.815,0.06,-0.8854,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,3,0,2,12,9,1,0,9,0,20,7,5,4,2,40,34,19,0,5,11,0,2,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,20,5,0,0,11,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,3,3,19,3,20,27,3,11,0,1,1,0,6,2,0,10,9,114,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.11318532338056557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275373166122418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774852241366705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109990635212927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684322445874168,0.07070381325028709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257993643042464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5179136516893177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12833598380078354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11729172153029142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605977471767622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903480197916412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274854276127904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05666476002267393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860690431315897,0.0,0.0,0.15484272627226547,0.11759130688408605,0.2330464736808059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23377263432253545,0.12304251093650415,0.0,0.0,0.09257868843007423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945533107744827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112914184311656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072148577805588,0.08040988845969238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12505221427470115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601709897976298,0.0,0.14860683366838615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242559542368722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17858293467614916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09262633910780024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277589044245972,0.0,0.0,0.10931516054752813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137662421469032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15411150603309834,0.2229568820845783,0.0,0.09207969927988637,0.06763220116575258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749336934728864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09206405917678323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578155660989088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16478584345456102,0.25362433578289306,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,illyyill,2020/04/05,"Suddenly unable to keep track of things? I never lost anything.  Organized and efficient.  Out of nowhere, I am unable to stop losing things.  Almost every day I misplace two or three important possessions like car keys, apartment keys, cell phone charger, etc. and on average spend a hour a day looking for them.  It is not uncommon for me to lose something while looking for something, for example I can't find my cell phone charger in my car so I Begin looking tearing up the seats etc. but in the process I lose my car keys and have to spend another 30 minutes looking for those too. 

​

I've resorted to throwing away almost everything I own, but that made little difference.  I can't stop losing things and don't know how to stopl    I Feel hopeless",3.7484802431610937,6.407197652482271,4.405942249240123,81.41250000000002,76.02127659574468,7.432826747720362,31.348024316109424,8.418075326091056,2.8497939209726453,603,30,102,12,14,192,89,141,0.135,0.818,0.046,-0.9256,0,0,2,0,0,1,19.0,0,0,1,5,3,7,0,0,4,0,6,0,0,2,1,20,16,10,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,3,3,0,2,4,5,6,0,2,2,5,14,1,19,14,3,21,0,6,4,0,5,8,0,3,10,67,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2419328151022001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13088962457262374,0.14678844648513226,0.0,0.1266721151491004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09941029075926344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349806952278547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558154354783014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621306135039578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26945378273460024,0.0,0.0,0.10178144573095736,0.0,0.10856963554598564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06108145131209771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041143675432057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11896627983438407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10737494895791486,0.0,0.0,0.06638997908920252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590180745116404,0.12107599478075798,0.0,0.0,0.4057752159832504,0.5405890764794565,0.1318703665073483,0.0,0.0,0.11430639160687155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317045360961143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18599956906209505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20199285498476224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407677454874004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11800663913594756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678844648513226,0.0
mentalhealth,AdamLudwig1995,2020/04/05,"Am I experiencing mild catatonia? So I found out many of my Neurological and especially psychological illnesses can produce various types of catatonic states, which I feel I experience. To help explain I should list my relevant illnesses according to the many Psychiatrists, Therapists, Neurologists, and addiction counselors(I say ""according"" as most of them have a common consensus that my illnesses are atypical in behavior and thus harder to diagnose); Bipolar Disorder (they constantly change their minds between type I and II), Borderline Personality Disorder, Cluster Headaches and Migraines(this may seem irrelevant but it can actually cripple and damage the neuron pathways), Insomnia (I actually may not have insomnia as I function on a 24/12 system, which is metrically no different than the average 16/8), Major Depressive Disorder, General Anxiety Disorder with Panic Attacks, and Shaken Baby Syndrome.

These are my experiences, I can't tell if they are catatonia or a Derealization disorder; I will sometimes just sit staring or pacing around without noticing or feeling what I am doing for extended periods, I will autopilot constantly even in the middle of conversations(during these moments I experience extreme discomfort, and I can't communicate what I'm thinking properly{I believe I am currently in one of these states}), I have pseudo-sleep paralysis (except I can move, I hallucinate entities, which are not always uncomfortable and I had a friendly conversation with a hallucination once) I will also very rarely hear voices and during these moments it's like I become dumb and extremely happy, because normally I would know they aren't real but I converse with them, lastly I experience physical contact from invisible things when I'm like this. I know these experiences aren't real but in those moments they are more real than reality is.",15.099806201550386,12.96585454817276,14.577882059800668,35.22259274640089,50.02990033222592,18.936987818383173,56.644795127353255,16.62779280708321,9.73152469545958,1533,95,183,67,12,520,182,301,0.16899999999999998,0.764,0.067,-0.982,2,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,7,1,6,10,2,2,9,0,29,10,1,2,0,49,40,23,0,4,12,0,2,2,1,7,9,3,0,1,16,16,0,0,8,0,0,1,8,6,0,1,2,7,36,4,27,31,4,23,0,2,1,0,17,8,1,8,12,147,52,3,0.0,0.0,0.1791829253409721,0.10008438099685177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734189048498288,0.07639169426091963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07023294563986968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172867394753744,0.0,0.10444496823664844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055965365970423765,0.10139483407425118,0.0,0.1034362904729558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712079707455673,0.0,0.0,0.1984238825638662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907418248605436,0.09318328952477864,0.0,0.09591992472883516,0.5261001856225687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06063838455817689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.449029694713184,0.0,0.0,0.09284186833752048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006628435638584,0.07093071075412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773143021261003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347440174253153,0.0,0.061537034574796624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091066215890143,0.07483585542172833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897056010563138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18615800823674988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270001001975836,0.0,0.0,0.09757748158632848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995244584501351,0.0,0.10452413098947527,0.0,0.097772630805933,0.062211544952917565,0.0,0.0,0.10771702484882767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801632922069471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134931533709637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07300948647399051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357864668024748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187440327394196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080055898256227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024432649674987,0.0,0.0,0.10659628086085243,0.06099322256399301,0.05882692379130568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575129788550028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884997327617587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521784053593474,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saintlyzaily,2020/04/05,I hate the nurses here. I'm currently being warded and yesterday night I couldn't sleep cause i had alot of dark thoughts in my head and not cause of any head pain (that's what I'm being warded for) and I was having a mental break down but none of the nurses paid attention and asked me to sleep persistently. They even wanted to take my phone away while that was the only source of distraction for the negativity.,4.4730894308943085,5.840499073170732,5.137560975609755,82.5706504065041,70.46341463414635,8.393495934959349,22.203252032520318,8.841846274778883,1.3011642276422766,332,7,66,6,6,107,56,82,0.152,0.848,0.0,-0.9072,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,1,2,3,1,1,6,0,7,5,4,2,0,13,15,6,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,5,0,8,0,11,7,2,8,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,4,46,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762245200285354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029413322083221,0.0,0.20395464586445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4460037518313935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433798832083608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2143224405184364,0.4455752503534299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21876648327242415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20371571364124166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16509980199585084,0.2309893766537451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43447533463288174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321781630574442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233798173699452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803993570683395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dotsliked,2020/04/05,"I don’t know how to be anymore I’m married , graduated college. And have a stable job. Mid 20’s . 

I think I’m losing my husband . We used to live with his  family member and we got in a huge argument and so we moved out finally. Now any argument we have blows up. I hate my job. It’s a toxic workplace and I’m not good enough to get hired somewhere else. I’ve probably applied to 30 jobs this year, got called twice, and never went further. My parents are immigrants and I’m constantly afraid they’ll get deported . I’m an immigrant and I don’t want my SO to help me get residency bc he’s made comments in the past that led me to think he thinks I only married him for that. I make OK money but it doesn’t ever feel like enough bc I don’t have enough to give my parents that much. My SO wants kids but I am terrified to have one and I think he wants to divorce over that. My SO family member has a mental illness and is into witch craft so I’m afraid I’m witchcrafted on . I have no real friends , rare to get notifications. I feel so alone and am scared to tell anyone everything that’s going on with me . I do believe in god but doubt a lot . My head constantly hurts . I’m so fat and cannot lose weight and am not happy with the way I look . I’ve neglected my personal hygiene for some time now . Idk what to do , I’m not suicidal but my life is just idk",0.026231617647059842,2.2044584409722248,2.5454738562091532,91.89985294117649,87.85416666666666,6.027124183006537,20.62336601307189,7.39963492309942,0.7031226307189544,1053,35,237,19,34,362,152,288,0.17,0.741,0.08900000000000001,-0.9761,5,1,0,0,1,0,25.0,4,0,1,2,12,15,1,4,8,1,21,5,2,5,2,51,54,24,1,3,8,3,3,1,1,1,3,0,0,2,9,21,2,1,7,0,1,4,10,10,0,2,4,4,33,5,26,48,6,27,0,4,1,0,22,12,0,3,11,137,42,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832566013366036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112607532629492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10372705533062662,0.07313308498739073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783924930374925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680001904617564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22605336346023275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737310747787404,0.0,0.0,0.32421416066775754,0.0,0.0,0.09460935718264307,0.0,0.0,0.0940004512568212,0.0,0.19719986065691364,0.0,0.10576960966819857,0.07472047080977112,0.0,0.11457530875016247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080743875895516,0.0,0.21857979342567824,0.10033407636633483,0.0594419843477721,0.08772671934194122,0.16730338644201267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113400172896458,0.0,0.10326284275602607,0.10734145920959966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07010574263168158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119677870033226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113739514939485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057480970272509216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387634871024143,0.05109831684065206,0.0,0.09235655964977578,0.0,0.0878308498030828,0.2340231542550114,0.0,0.08892028903419841,0.0,0.0989673801385634,0.06981590219710257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540403005771984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111164632127732,0.0768870774495789,0.0,0.08066771744293681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087417502849244,0.07954684937008279,0.0,0.0,0.23227384394582365,0.0,0.09984479876189324,0.0,0.09132560856727133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11276775308104905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904847478638132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471473327143402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11440655736733225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141792645526363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680730527639632,0.0,0.0,0.06098837518089721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903338157976971,0.0,0.0,0.1850730289661262,0.08302017803603894,0.0,0.12736475109964202,0.0,0.09695773468638008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06735375131118576
mentalhealth,PlusSizePleasure,2020/04/05,"My dad is in the ICU He was brought to the hospital two nights ago showing symptoms of COVID-19. Fever, SoB, 88% o2 sat and vertigo. The results still haven’t come back, but they did say he has double pneumonia, and the mutated virus is presenting as that. I’ve been having increased anxiety and more frequent panic attacks. Him and I have never had an ideal relationship. The last time I saw him was the end of September. I called the hospital today and was able to talk to him and it made my heart flutter to hear him say “I love you too.” I want my dad so badly to make it through this so We can work on our relationship.",2.7424926686217006,4.714576709677424,4.032170087976542,86.23189149560119,76.25806451612904,7.734897360703813,27.40175953079179,8.575989854853784,2.025122580645162,488,20,100,10,11,160,87,124,0.156,0.773,0.071,-0.9172,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,2,1,1,2,5,6,1,1,8,0,13,5,1,3,1,15,22,10,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,8,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,4,0,1,10,4,16,2,11,12,3,16,0,1,1,1,20,2,1,0,11,68,20,1,0.18750000759273733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16620744362786904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434369925983549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133083270167017,0.0,0.14417593215405627,0.15655467445938634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914584715097874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16151465415585198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16606935377643864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113261356424896,0.2221884117747321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15283753148073034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16922607734149586,0.17741704074476888,0.12515771102957227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461156486433366,0.0,0.0,0.17595605552693191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21999085977659955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40260967647122975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982150634739888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14973774826719366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19488430035952956,0.0,0.15070540372898705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093327622624442,0.0,0.1777280833974791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831602626014226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11059236243588157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13650223864182534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,papaj0hnsdotc0m,2020/04/05,"OCD and extreme panic disorder i’m constantly convinced i’m dying which gives me the most intense panic attacks ever. they’re so physically bad that it only continues the thought in my head that i’m dying. i can’t eat anything anymore without thinking it’s been drugged, i can’t sleep without thinking it’s my last night awake. so much so to wear i have a panic attack almost every night over it and over every meal. every physical sensation that isn’t the slightest bit neutral sends me into panic. i already have heart palpitations and an arrhythmia and asthma so continuously making my heart rate and breathing up and down is becoming painful. i’m only 17 and i just want everything back to normal. i’m so sick of being terrified of dying every day and the only thing i can focus on throughout the entire day is intrusive thoughts and panicking. idk what to do this is all so new, it only started back in january because i took one dose of effexor and i’ve never been the same since. i hate this so much, i go to therapy but not much seems to be working.",3.749552319309601,5.903963771844662,5.370420711974113,76.94316073354909,73.90291262135922,7.878748651564186,30.3764832793959,8.680891452615391,2.789142179072277,851,39,145,17,18,288,122,206,0.147,0.8320000000000001,0.021,-0.965,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,11,10,3,4,8,0,14,13,6,1,3,30,31,18,3,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,13,11,2,0,5,0,0,3,7,9,0,1,5,0,14,1,18,24,7,25,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,3,14,98,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435859750324532,0.0,0.1039861003305732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345169533813102,0.0,0.0,0.07754397111835717,0.0,0.0,0.2144024201539207,0.0,0.14491543398283185,0.07867883443639191,0.0574422593612719,0.10407058465166263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287569662969777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10183008659076456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154222199976565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2933902754455005,0.0,0.1079967325810594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927788456259904,0.09642169743469653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523721024748161,0.31757426430866914,0.0,0.0846886234695372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039483003477307,0.053553570896770535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303346836778636,0.0967080508670729,0.0,0.0,0.2233280523124092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681073003130788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289983265295658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20781157956392332,0.0,0.07267665056210197,0.09100875450985917,0.0,0.17685856278249285,0.09232623846578067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385327136678524,0.2866672695468397,0.1002682818198046,0.4422384574246056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578423845576312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794874348696416,0.0,0.0942989152311247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06669708971391035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776120394601553,0.0,0.06260279816006603,0.12075866405061125,0.0,0.14961755879331376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046939558060418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05557980433397707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18167037826182567,0.0,0.06860119042362532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Monologicaly,2020/04/05,"i saw a video of someone dying and i feel pretty shaken up. i didnt search for this, it was posted on a discord channel and me being curious, i clicked on it to see what would happen. Somebody was hanged. i wont go into too much detail for obvious reasons, but i feel pretty shaken up by watching it. no idea what to do, dont really want to tell my parents as they will blow it way out of proportion, and it isnt a big enough issue to warrent counseling.",1.3987251461988317,3.3063721473684216,3.9287719298245634,85.69584795321641,80.15789473684211,6.32748538011696,24.239766081871338,7.3871296695380915,1.2392573099415205,354,13,71,5,9,124,66,95,0.098,0.8140000000000001,0.08900000000000001,0.2828,2,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,10,0,0,1,1,13,17,5,1,2,1,1,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,4,2,0,2,5,0,0,0,4,6,9,0,16,9,2,11,0,0,4,0,3,7,0,0,0,54,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23260812170417736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626748143229778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23158278612467265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266503798954805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737636431133115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19819449392873845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530117549620983,0.0,0.23393003695727774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16475890728601095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488661683410424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21465141701072726,0.4560348424095148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358129826453964,0.23043956806904264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17859995608841536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899018191798784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958966079702986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132195730119354,0.1779013362145003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15921317179545294,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ak47isatool,2020/04/05,"To older people, was it at all common to have multiple friends with significant depression/suicidal thoughts/mental health issues? Recently talked to a friend about their suicide ideation and it got me thinking. I’ve suffered from issues of depression in the past, and I feel like I know a lot of people with significant mental health problems. Idk if my friend group is just a weird sample or more predisposed to people with mental health issues, but it makes me wonder how common this amount of mental illness is among my own generation.",12.210157894736845,10.12451672631579,10.56513157894737,61.61717105263162,55.42105263157895,13.289473684210527,41.64473684210526,11.698219412168324,4.978315789473684,439,17,66,9,4,136,65,95,0.152,0.74,0.10800000000000001,-0.6542,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,1,0,3,8,0,0,4,0,4,4,0,2,1,18,10,6,1,2,4,0,1,1,3,0,4,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,7,4,15,8,5,8,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,4,6,45,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11888355563968682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06979124584780036,0.09860743108549178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199209210915507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039382494624768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.440152822663585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43219699154263663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585673314751715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06743364571774511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11734670804423145,0.0,0.0,0.09213494896330288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4173001260863529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13176361185174307,0.2870742907103779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207442320078794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362862750231149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30196107168672515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11094190335410796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844294873220725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14968578218391676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,originalrobonut5,2020/04/05,I’ve been having mental issues for the last month or two and I felt like I wanted to try to confide in my friend So I’ve been having mental issues for the last month or two and I felt like I wanted to try to confide in my friend about it but lately I have been having doubts about if we are really friends anymore. What should I do?,1.8672300469483567,3.3963408169014087,3.3179577464788754,92.35092723004698,77.45070422535211,5.2967136150234735,17.467136150234744,5.46131890053228,-0.5184384976525824,262,4,57,1,6,86,38,71,0.039,0.7909999999999999,0.17,0.8171,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,2,0,10,0,0,0,0,13,14,7,0,4,4,0,2,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,5,2,9,5,10,8,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,4,7,42,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717057590163709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33247807555737163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4012965343144717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614208875023184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822601484736434,0.19530650763208485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16917235815895335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3489635163508083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2763932121253448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091624000594287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350978339643428,0.0,0.3382601277021228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042418268521864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lexandm,2020/04/05,"I need help fast I know this is not the place for a diagnosis or treatment. With everything going on in the world there is no chance of me getting in to see a therapist or psychiatrist any time soon and I need to do something, I have to, before I go off the deep end. The worst part is, even if I could get an appointment with a doctor, I have no clue how to describe what is happening to me. I’m only 20, I’m in good health besides a diagnosis of general anxiety disorder, depression, and depersonalization/derealization. I know how to cope with those 3 things, I’m good when it comes to that. However, I am not good with what I have been experiencing lately and I’m wondering if anybody knows what this sounds like or experiences the same thing and can tell me something that will help me. I don’t know how to describe it but I’ll do the best I can. Here goes:
 Every day, probably every 5 f*cking minutes it seems, I get a weird feeling. It’s different from DP/DR. It’s like a flashback of a distant memory, or maybe a dream, deja vu almost but the opposite, maybe something that never happened at all. It’s not a clear flashback of a scenario or anything, it’s just a feeling. I feel sick to my stomach, extremely alone, cold, sad, depressed and an immense feeling of doom, but there’s a slight familiarity to it. Sometimes it’s so strong it almost feels as if I’ve been knocked out of my reality for a second and my life doesn’t feel like mine. I know that sounds like DP/DR but it’s not, this feeling is so different from that. It’s almost worse. I don’t know how else to explain this but I need advice... I need something... it’s gotten so bad I feel sick 24/7 and I really don’t want it to effect my recovery from DP/DR. Maybe it is a symptom just one I’ve never had before. Please if anyone has experienced this or know what it is or has any advice please just let me know.",2.4874689453279544,4.263530942558751,4.402682174222643,84.16920879816442,76.38903394255874,7.566706226758447,25.966373921987497,8.391295532112219,1.7215646649260226,1473,55,307,28,33,502,175,383,0.136,0.7390000000000001,0.125,-0.8545,3,1,4,0,0,0,52.0,0,0,0,3,16,16,0,0,23,0,27,7,1,5,4,75,65,32,0,10,23,0,8,4,0,1,6,2,0,0,33,13,0,0,20,1,0,3,12,7,0,2,4,14,30,9,35,58,5,22,1,4,1,0,4,10,0,16,13,202,63,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16014185991994925,0.0,0.0,0.2461535604516841,0.08486524509104819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144417319926858,0.0,0.06268396206766425,0.0,0.0,0.057294432123112624,0.0,0.06742973114414114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684165716079037,0.0,0.0,0.1394500017603701,0.0,0.08599109315667103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058415176639345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542251260118373,0.0,0.0,0.05284459406648545,0.0,0.14114979829846674,0.0,0.0,0.17121995577591922,0.09391046831057394,0.08386917762508363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845044997950775,0.0,0.07257461889118823,0.0,0.0,0.05412067175680901,0.0,0.1380761582866795,0.0,0.07364248992100468,0.08015315346442675,0.0,0.0,0.3314510647468274,0.05853803300866594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12843098106763914,0.0,0.0931369089123957,0.20618243716589307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449187424039012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709850829125919,0.0,0.0,0.10984546087024273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3602571449260488,0.0,0.0924320163805035,0.0,0.0,0.0837893170248344,0.05787672497901749,0.16012720077851572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24695957064107854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24303022174282876,0.12639453299030504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055524741109330894,0.062319148202588076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873315723542663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560997788795961,0.17989127556028334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834530056665953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05249293450275663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529566113736557,0.07459520130389148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523260084844783,0.08104086683436172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08516715158360162,0.0,0.0,0.07161927030741108,0.0,0.0,0.0951387865788532,0.10887474004551903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04777993876100416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04833040156743836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886055707924541,0.0,0.0,0.08350397535696834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emmoriah,2020/04/05,"disgusting room my room is disgusting. rotting food, dirty floors, neglected pet, smelly, etc. everytime i walk in it i just want to cry and lay in my bed and sleep and hope i wake up and its magically clean. ive tried to clean i really have but it just makes me anxious and disgusted with myself that o just end up crying and giving up. everyone in my life makes fun of my room i feel like a disgusting person how can i live like this",1.2212499999999975,3.6214277159090926,2.9942727272727296,89.26890909090912,84.3409090909091,7.610909090909091,20.163636363636364,8.548686976883017,1.336587272727273,341,10,73,9,10,113,59,88,0.242,0.5670000000000001,0.191,-0.765,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,9,4,0,1,0,4,4,2,3,0,18,10,8,0,2,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,7,1,5,7,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,1,13,4,10,10,1,12,0,1,0,0,2,10,0,1,3,44,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514975070461188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4890757646334335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19717545715968984,0.0,0.2482804167530697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21272318134311702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125634833086542,0.15903994531501625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691932802056917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21355762143361465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211121314624928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572432605364877,0.2175220104465391,0.0,0.19657775221435825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972014803229457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943834083885358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14261622749618594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227810156043467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15114453109266415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13130718658073584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DifferentCriticism9,2020/04/05,"I'm going crazy about ex-friend This guy, lets call him V has been very abusive to me and many people I know. I have to work with him and I'm in a creative field. I feel really insecure about expressing myself openly either in talking or while playing music around this guy. 

The problem is that most of the traumatic events happened quite a while ago however I am not over those traumas at all. He used to always be rude and boundary pushing but at one point of my life I had enough of it and just stopped entertaining that shit. We've had multiple fights where I have also been super rude and so has he. More recently his behavior has changed slightly for the better however he still carries himself in an egotistical (maybe I'm biased here) and rude way most of the time. I have stopped my interactions till the bare minimum however it still causes me so much distress because my musicality is affected by my anxiety (about his judgement of my playing).

He keeps reaching out sometimes however I am tired of making the mistake again and again of opening myself up, trying to forgive him and then getting attacked. I've stopped entertaining his advances and just say no pretty much. I would have no problem cutting all ties and moving on however I need stay in this band because all of us have spent 5 years of our lives on it. 

Any time I have to interact with this guy I go through a lot of distress. I have to think about how I want to react to him because I don't know if he'll be rude to me in return. In these quarantine times I've only exchanged like 10 texts top and seen his texts come on the band group. Even though there's been minimal interactions, I'm literally only thinking about him and the traumatic events and my brain keeps running in circles.

Very honestly speaking, he's been okay in the recent past. he's not said or done anything rude to me, however I can't let go of the past. I have raised those previous issues with him 3-4 times and it never ends well, and it feels like I'm never going to get either a genuine sorry or closure from him about these issues.

I am at my wits end. Some nights like the one right now I just keep thinking about this stuff and I keep judging my every move through his voice in my mind. I genuinely start feeling like I go crazy when such a night occurs and I don't know what to do. I don't know how to start feeling more true to myself while expressing myself in his company.

Thanks for listening reddit",5.700488980716251,6.16409209297521,6.134644628099173,79.81545179063366,67.1198347107438,9.180606060606062,32.455647382920105,9.120678840339163,2.718485068870524,1959,79,376,33,30,633,239,484,0.179,0.7,0.121,-0.9843,6,1,0,0,1,0,34.0,2,0,0,6,30,32,9,3,17,1,33,4,2,7,6,80,74,34,0,7,12,0,4,4,0,2,2,5,0,3,18,25,0,7,12,6,2,11,10,16,1,2,10,10,57,16,62,58,14,74,0,0,1,0,42,26,1,8,39,256,75,1,0.0,0.09464667945709077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708102528802445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388131756732787,0.06646792254078962,0.0,0.0,0.05432225353956828,0.0,0.061109234920981685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573578225157488,0.07111159428866651,0.0,0.09087689605125417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14608531645797362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064881787271238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917432717656082,0.08156808436346054,0.0,0.0,0.08206044730281041,0.08450418176356432,0.06881095849261602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174665065069432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415028434333808,0.08253908643262915,0.0,0.05276106894612282,0.0,0.06730372582877929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16156222670289586,0.11413491722419593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617163558654033,0.0,0.08346971840232052,0.0,0.2269928805871405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2372861437081515,0.0706390692443288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667513536969904,0.0,0.2840098830840098,0.0,0.0,0.17560343806509804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16336877533082875,0.05642276375864731,0.15610453466631266,0.0,0.07053695042671104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791251258512311,0.0,0.0,0.053321614089433936,0.08098744367133384,0.08025184284511724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065768334026667,0.0,0.0,0.16980308004828196,0.11744439141262028,0.05923122288181725,0.12321928854616405,0.0,0.0,0.14992701308334466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825973140351704,0.12150717159443697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525121257729678,0.05537987020304888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551396855091322,0.0,0.0,0.08126834447372415,0.0,0.15287187987268488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08496395552868724,0.0,0.0,0.051174223204940285,0.0,0.15774696234679464,0.0,0.0,0.06821848294056257,0.07598573106658134,0.06352508526805399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199735414341595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790049831922748,0.08942095446170296,0.11308126996888965,0.08514319820983042,0.12758715962514824,0.2003538803212125,0.0,0.0,0.09144536473873613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420583528353818,0.0,0.07354428043156404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15355478570163486,0.07848330439161134,0.0,0.1863185035498903,0.09181219256350454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054234389074335074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608777572824494,0.06899208795715764,0.0,0.13182143553513329,0.04711626013719245,0.06340632657551598,0.0,0.0,0.07182318654477157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581547843223456,0.0,0.0,0.05674562418021562,0.0,0.0,0.051441156267687665
mentalhealth,AlloValentine,2020/04/05,"Dealing with anger and self pity at the moment I could be playing a game that came out yesterday and enjoying myself but I chose to be angry and having a pity party. And people are spoiling it for me, I want to make them miserable I’ve already ruined my family’s weekend.",2.8972222222222186,5.08792316666667,4.792370370370372,79.9396666666667,76.5925925925926,7.282962962962964,25.61481481481481,8.238735603445708,1.9844637037037045,217,8,38,4,5,74,44,54,0.301,0.5670000000000001,0.132,-0.9194,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,0,7,1,1,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,11,8,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,7,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,7,2,6,4,0,6,0,4,0,0,4,2,0,0,3,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4035605591806457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182649471012301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919827891909155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3770220579820377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3447507081613773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24410850639749404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535312861512227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38150628886104737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21570014497001014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fuzzbuzzly,2020/04/06,Why did the national suicide helpline ask for my name and ethnicity at the end of the conversation? It’s making me paranoid I don’t want them sending anyone out.,3.640215053763441,6.183023129032258,5.188387096774196,76.26924731182797,75.7741935483871,8.004301075268819,32.913978494623656,8.841846274778883,3.2278946236559154,131,7,23,3,3,44,29,31,0.198,0.762,0.04,-0.7351,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,5,5,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,4,4,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31422912668548203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4201259256614955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3980327279395477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999762690160965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4915678398474183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650662431606235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4055112743317891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spicynudos,2020/04/06,"Anxious about my future I’m 16(f) and have had really bad anxiety for the past couple of years, my trigger is public speaking, and I know it sounds cliche, but in some cases, I can’t even talk in front of my family during a party. I know that being able to present your self is one of the most important skills in life, and i (a sophomore) don’t think I can overcome this. In freshman year of high school, I missed 30 days of school trying to avoid speeches and discussions, and it came to the point where I was granted a 504 plan in school which excuses me from anything I don’t feel comfortable doing, which led to me avoiding my fears even more. Now I feel that i have fallen into an idea that I will never have to face my fears again. I question how I will get through life and sometimes think about giving up on trying, I have big goals in life, like being an anesthesiologist, but my anxiety makes me feel like it’s impossible. I have tried therapy and I absolutely hated it, I couldn’t even sit in the room alone with the therapist. Please give me advice.",4.842714285714287,5.662116795238094,5.431428571428572,82.83857142857143,69.14285714285714,8.476190476190476,26.904761904761905,8.634040054169528,1.7589047619047622,837,25,168,13,14,270,125,210,0.159,0.728,0.113,-0.8501,0,3,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,0,3,9,10,1,4,10,0,19,4,1,4,1,31,34,10,0,1,2,0,3,2,0,2,3,3,1,1,10,10,0,2,9,0,0,4,5,7,0,1,3,6,28,3,26,26,3,29,0,1,0,0,10,15,0,3,11,114,38,4,0.12323906208181552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042778515104575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763850136028607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18855509034488466,0.13922506154807662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10141524744471672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289946913925382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14095265576084914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636167814910538,0.0,0.07947899972954123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441947146292891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161788197350872,0.2773564146815583,0.18694011812418634,0.08804201057557794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438732343304059,0.23644427602778256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167305954396375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13020883538346628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13912190038017666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13545793108051318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611421824813345,0.12041676137540122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226303090661223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950495621246813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350997791863361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764562954763295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352794821700622,0.11650074805248012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805595411596558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895009888614883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3741735307389336,0.0,0.0,0.1285652191920726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188658361357335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905488988866104,0.0,0.0,0.14093460788131584,0.14309004972686792,0.0,0.1579332296136037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25101370058716965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15872383085864625
mentalhealth,nikster420,2020/04/06,"dealing with non-understanding parents during the pandemic being bipolar with ADHD is hard; I feel whiny

hi i’ve never posted really. but this is just a rant because I hate to burden anyone around me. I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder (type 1) about a year and a half ago after five years of struggling with what I thought was just basic depression and anxiety issues. My family does not recognize mental health illness and that has undoubtedly made it harder to deal with. Last November my psychologist recommended I get an ADHD evaluation and my college funded the testing. After the long evaluation, I did end with an ADHD diagnosis with more hyperactive issues than attentive. I have been on and off of Zoloft (Sertraline) since I was 16 (currently 21) but it doesn’t seem to help as much as it used to. This time around, I have been on 150mg daily since October. In February, my psychiatrist prescribed me Adderall (Amphetamine Salts) as needed (Up to 30mg twice a day but I usually only take 15mg once a day because the 30mg interfered with my heart condition). Being home from college due to COVID-19, it has been so extremely difficult. My doctor had suggested mood stabilizers or antipsychotics before but I always said i’d rather keep trying zoloft because if my parents found out about the different medication, they would flip out and make me stop it or I would never hear the end of it. I just don’t know what to do because sitting in my house with no one that is comforting or loving or caring or understanding towards what I have going on is so trying. On top of that, the new online course format from my university has clashed severely with my ADHD. At college, I lived on my own in university housing but I had a routine, and I had physical classes and attendance to keep me accountable and on top of things. The lack of structure and routine has hindered me in trying to get work finished. I don’t blame only ADHD because I am not disabled and I deserve no pity or accommodation. I have never asked for learning/classroom accommodations after my ADHD diagnosis because I feel like it is unfair to all the other students. I just wanted to get off my chest how stressed I am because I have no one to turn to at home. I feel like such a burden to everyone. All of these “battles” I face everyday just stay to me because I can’t tell anyone without repercussions. 

TL;DR I have bipolar disorder and ADHD, with not a great home life and forced to be here due to COVID-19 pandemic.

also posted to covid-19 megathread in r/offmychest, r/rant, and r/empaths",6.2543124999999975,7.424322139583335,7.197916666666671,70.17375000000003,66.14583333333334,10.166666666666666,34.79166666666667,10.270032843473604,3.8925416666666655,2057,95,341,50,32,689,237,480,0.168,0.772,0.06,-0.9951,4,0,0,0,0,0,52.0,0,0,1,3,16,16,2,2,19,0,37,15,3,4,6,78,64,33,0,7,22,2,4,2,0,2,11,2,3,0,18,29,0,3,9,0,2,2,14,9,0,5,14,7,49,6,70,45,6,53,0,2,0,1,13,23,0,8,26,251,67,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5634079814014559,0.0,0.059366286872560965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053557168209989583,0.05572574022653387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05123309440819486,0.0,0.0,0.0936562065703107,0.0,0.0,0.11923785425949082,0.06260941004154524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32660214971524204,0.0,0.05698790304368359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828201457777572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863822894235207,0.13808956779374312,0.05768254513105694,0.06797476919121284,0.0,0.06997107289872279,0.15351052263351952,0.06854827540360812,0.0586073027262533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863392736015542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399423844835325,0.0,0.0,0.06313486874136626,0.0,0.10158856706565036,0.09568905578641136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343090796944791,0.0,0.0,0.1049696981641452,0.0,0.038061506402908986,0.0,0.0,0.07383643078816353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059993403390339685,0.06612059462460357,0.0,0.0711876842322469,0.07548186602467037,0.07936167421424509,0.04488965503649858,0.0,0.20153394061498534,0.0,0.0,0.15455248045621067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398019114083021,0.0,0.11905487911703108,0.0,0.0,0.03680584257201922,0.05459079654154377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047304025097940385,0.06543788653587387,0.0,0.0591371540676424,0.05926776282718056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06044448813175116,0.06337015182374611,0.04470406628676896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06746684612579737,0.06749162580883254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04923183542337093,0.049658596409215605,0.15495789100843516,0.06468159329981606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132257345866383,0.09076338538314503,0.10186984670353187,0.0,0.0,0.14872808328283207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128280569587909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04290372497896466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370533256460753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06096843378654317,0.0,0.07565885078183318,0.0,0.11079920721053947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138281992468798,0.0,0.055991260452520585,0.07671574709315518,0.07001326249354975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050354312135302455,0.0,0.058536134540200485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0444929584173268,0.0,0.0,0.05316797345760872,0.03905168136497008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13640797070405594,0.0728458747067106,0.0,0.13943960507853584,0.0,0.057841963825894974,0.07375976107570252,0.0,0.03950158772059898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455823719729169,0.0,0.0487561259657001,0.0,0.0,0.09514941316598728,0.0,0.0,0.08625503555843926
mentalhealth,leDude27,2020/04/06,"Is schizophrenia really a bad thing? It's benefited me tremendously.  

I just want to clarify a few things before you read this post. I really enjoyed writing this post because I feel like I truly have a chance of spreading understanding and reducing ignorance around schizophrenia. The two 'beings' I talk about in this post are obviously not physically real beings. They are 'real' mentally or metaphysically, as in I experience them. They are real in the same sense that dreams are real, they are seen by the self. I don't get open eyed visuals except for typical early morning hypnagogia. I don't get auditory hallucinations other than in dreams or in rare instances of extremely random tinnitus. When on psychedelics, I still don't have auditory hallucinations but I do get some open eyed visuals. The two beings are not auditory so they instead speak to me visually. Visual communication might be hard to understand if you've never taken a psychedelic. They don't say anything to me. They show me what they want me to know through closed eye visuals and ideas.

I truthfully believe that the main causes of delusion are ignorance, overconfidence, and fear. I really doubt that all schizophrenics are delusional. Imagine growing up in a society where nearly everybody tells you that you're dangerous, mentally inferior, evil, and delusional. Don't you think that that would drive you a bit crazy? What if it gets so stressful that you start to believe it? And on top of the shame, stress, and suicidal ideation caused by societies collective gas-lighting effort, schizophrenics have one big hurdle in their way. Language is useless to them. Think about it this way. Let's say you have a speech to present. If you walk in and just give the speech normally then it should all work out ok. The people who listened will learn and the people who didn't listen will just pretend that they were listening due to conformity. However, if you announced that you were schizophrenic at the beginning of the speech, well, good luck man. Good luck because absolutely no human would listen because schizophrenics aren't seen as members of society worth listening to.

Let me start off by saying that it's obvious that many people with schizophrenia suffer. But is that suffering from the schizophrenia itself or is it from the way society treats schizophrenics? SWIM is obviously schizophrenic and sees no problem with it because it affects his life very positively. He has these entities in his head that act exactly like advisers. If he does something bad or immoral, then the beings/entities/archetypes or whatever the hell they are, will start making him feel bad through guilt, regret, shame, fear, etc.

Speaking of feelings, do you consciously make your feelings? I'm guessing most people will answer no to that. Feelings just happen to you, as if they're being served to you by the subconscious mind and it's your duty to interpret the feelings. For example, if I miss a workout day I can choose to view it as a good thing and just grind harder next workout, or I could view it as a reason to quit. I believe that life is entirely about the choices you make in it.

Speaking of choices, what makes someone suffer from schizophrenia? Think about it like this. You're born into the world and you, like other humans, start to grow and develop a personality. Throughout early childhood you have an intensely strong and visual imagination and love having it, although everything good has it's negative aspects. The imagination can be a source of great fear, shame, and cowardliness if you pussy out and don't accept it's challenges. This reminds me of a while ago when I thought ""Damn, I need to go for a ten kilometer run"". I went the whole day thinking about the run but never did it and instead played video games or wasted the time some other way. My brain punished me for that because I knew what the right choice was and I decided to make the wrong choice.

You might wonder, how and why does the brain punish me? This is how I see it. There is a force/being that has been guiding me my whole life to do the right things and follow love, learning, growth, responsibility, laughter, and all the other things that are worth struggling for. This force of good, lets call him Henry, is the force letting me write this post in hope of piquing interest in others and reducing stigma, hate, and ignorance towards schizophrenia so I can maybe one day open up to someone about it without being labeled as some useless, delusional, evil, sub par member of society. Henry is such a good dude. I associate my boy Henry with virtue, responsibility, love, sacrifice, and anything good. Henry grows stronger, hangs out with me more, loves me more, and improves my mood when I make the right choices like working out, doing homework, going out of my way for people I love, practicing ukulele, etc.

Henry is the force of good but every yin has its yang and there is indeed a force of evil. This force can be described as evil, satan, or 'the shadow', but for now we can call him Hank. This douche-bag uses fear, weakness, shame, jealousy, greed, laziness, etc. He uses these to manipulate me and make me stray away from doing good things. To give some more understanding of this Hank fellow I will try and show you how he operates. Let's say you have two plates on a table. One of the plates has plenty of good, healthy food. The other plate just has Doritos or some other junk food. This is where the advisers come in. Hank will be like ""Bruh Doritos taste better than healthy food, you can always eat healthy food some other time"". Henry will be saying ""Hank wants you to eat those Doritos because he wants you to suffer, pick that healthy plate and you'll function better in the future"". This is a very important thing to realize. Henry (good) is a man of delaying gratification and making sacrifices in the present to have a better future while Hank (bad) is a lazy, cowardly, hateful slob whose sole purpose is to make me like him. Without Hank constantly posing a threat to everyone life, things would get boring and Henry wouldn't really serve a purpose anymore. I hate to get all cringy and bring up the movie Mega Mind but writing this is reminding me a lot about how Metro Mans absence caused Mega Mind to make a new villain. A consistent battle against evil and reinforcement of virtue gives life its meaning.

People will inevitably ask ""If the hallucinations are not real, how could they possibly be helpful?"". Let's say I've oriented my entire life around hanging out with Henry and avoiding Hank. Henry is associated with good so If I hang out with him, I succeed more. Hank is everything that I do not want to be, so he belongs in my mind to make me hate the evil he is associated with. Sure they aren't real people that I can show to my friends, but maybe that's how it's supposed to be. They belong in the mind, where they guide me along my life journey. These two characters of my imagination compose the moral system that I live my life by.

Regardless of all the misunderstanding and hatred surrounding schizophrenia, I would truly, absolutely, frickin hate to be born any other way.

Any feedback is greatly appreciated. I know this is a big post but please at least read the first paragraph or skim through. I tried to make it entertaining and interesting while also explaining my ideas.",7.208729816533943,8.251972774121167,6.827941044480621,74.12544361828503,63.9663425579656,9.881891856218928,33.829636147652785,9.916854025145753,3.3886150890932285,5897,242,1002,120,85,1845,497,1337,0.174,0.6759999999999999,0.15,-0.9951,1,1,1,0,0,0,175.0,1,25,16,12,41,103,20,14,73,1,114,33,6,27,13,233,200,93,1,29,41,0,7,7,2,17,15,17,1,8,92,62,7,6,36,15,3,20,22,54,1,9,12,34,116,48,147,149,27,124,5,9,9,5,104,54,2,37,45,689,208,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03073233569137928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027725110644738957,0.028847722259752625,0.0,0.0,0.04715276851541909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034382733802991935,0.0,0.0,0.05705993256393056,0.061726241563478,0.0324112136399306,0.0,0.03257304723506689,0.0,0.11579002009832308,0.12680488495248307,0.0,0.029501110124098756,0.11718164159121525,0.0,0.0919868140028516,0.03785001095183979,0.0,0.0,0.07740504365879876,0.07080267753315665,0.0,0.0,0.10684508715537863,0.0,0.029864622559915076,0.0,0.03746531026235205,0.0,0.05536139761860517,0.0,0.0,0.06707669427057936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060678859879376726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095091306229276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11599665302130392,0.0,0.0,0.02921046898319532,0.03312810219259251,0.06231725141762739,0.033913330617394544,0.0,0.15605087712802046,0.1051793571718488,0.024767829852083305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029489778173563862,0.16768952852071284,0.0,0.02678549629404528,0.0,0.10867999908191353,0.09977415713027113,0.03940684362506169,0.34894862432133344,0.0,0.0764462827903067,0.038192258259691504,0.0,0.030658040335130095,0.0,0.03105697710584666,0.17114429899237413,0.035580811643253725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02323817136506009,0.0,0.0,0.034434541834424404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827507651831198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03810679659839599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21271089315756225,0.19590420832403616,0.11856404041155062,0.0,0.030613719779055488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02947468833278677,0.15645245793679144,0.0,0.27770516451747,0.035149335081509005,0.06966015439428101,0.03776514571838259,0.0,0.0,0.06987721179754906,0.07355751986735877,0.17503107951713096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025706924505600318,0.05347836485851798,0.033483927378014665,0.03687130552261873,0.0,0.03396865587846894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047865821729754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682478009438036,0.030271987175920542,0.0,0.03805659565202453,0.0,0.03908454495232876,0.16601853235826658,0.0,0.0,0.033173938369949627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036875179748207386,0.0693575740465924,0.2367682378634215,0.08884043438961182,0.03564592251089906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888224472929785,0.0,0.16542301425611738,0.0,0.0,0.055254054227963034,0.0,0.03616775052077627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058750548682998435,0.026690201755129456,0.0,0.0,0.09815673317729304,0.0,0.02768703160925718,0.0,0.07942737256055353,0.03624398963033218,0.0,0.03792270198685827,0.0,0.03267550390745777,0.0,0.0,0.027865954477188502,0.030302588077083473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18426249725459784,0.0888590193133277,0.0,0.027523634951890464,0.04043201770719971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04707650045730448,0.0,0.135467884054364,0.1082762198302716,0.0,0.05988646900426696,0.0,0.05721177998102413,0.10224456658186347,0.16511375971823114,0.0,0.0,0.031171958714107238,0.03213888576357396,0.03128374552242656,0.07741430511086185,0.0,0.06684013845938784,0.03759749081378032,0.05047947948658461,0.0,0.0,0.09851260236410067,0.03790555186211863,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Stranded_Psychonaut,2020/04/06,"Is this normal or should I be worried? After arguments with my wife it's fairly common for me to spiral into feeling trapped in the marriage (we have a child, so now there's REALLY no way out) and about half the time I arrive at thinking about how driving out somewhere and killing myself would be preferable to all the arguing.

I am on Wellbutrin and have had two major depressive episodes in the past, but feel pretty stable and happy on the average day. Anyway, I get this could be run of the mill ""self victimizing"" as a coping mechanism, or out could be something to worry about. It just scares me a little and I need an outside perspective.",5.0474796747967465,6.557554073170736,5.665203252032522,78.7877235772358,69.2439024390244,8.06829268292683,29.92682926829269,8.515128840125781,2.411448780487805,513,20,89,8,9,166,90,123,0.18899999999999997,0.715,0.09699999999999999,-0.8662,0,1,1,0,0,1,13.0,1,0,0,0,9,6,3,1,10,0,13,0,0,1,1,27,18,11,1,7,4,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,11,0,0,4,0,0,2,1,5,0,2,1,2,10,1,20,9,2,19,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,2,6,75,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413816937570697,0.0,0.0,0.1378743823115958,0.0,0.1841336999327028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21619340457509573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169444101254608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275793347333861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23652270274970616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142698884987384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851972324588987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20946503840693567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204083073022242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174973746588152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13695688363477607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21403723400457125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230255821434738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16458302488414622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369855342514936,0.0,0.0,0.1246604247781943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088380067044372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16969349697277308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4342204306951573,0.0,0.15186754895152482,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VanillaOGKush,2020/04/06,"depression and work I don't know what to do, I feel stuck and lost a lot. iv had 4 jobs in the past year, I leave(because I feel I don't fit in or my depression is misunderstood) or get sacked due to time off with depression. I overthink like crazy when working so I try to cope by keeping myself distracted by listening to a podcast or music which can get me in trouble at work (factory or warehouse-type environment). I have walked out of work a couple of times due to being embarrassed to explain myself or unable to, I know this is wrong of me and I always regret it after, but in the situation, I feel very overwhelmed. currently, I'm looking for part-time work so I can focus on bettering my mental health and study online, but it's very difficult to find work due to the coronavirus.  I currently work in a warehouse but the job is awful and I feel as if I'm due to be sacked soon like many other people working there.  My irresponsibility is disappointing my dad and giving me a horrible feeling of guilt as it also puts a strain on my girlfriend. iv tried many different antidepressants at different strengths which never really worked. I'm no longer going to see the doctor about my mental health because iv been so many times and still feel the same way. I know they try there best but there is nothing they can do anymore and I also had a terrible experience at a GP when I went for my mental health. that was the last time I went. iv also contacted companies about over the phone counselling. I was giving a one-hour phone call questionnaire and chat, I was told I fit the criteria and was put on a waiting list which could take up to 3 months. that was 8 months ago. 

that's all I want to say. there is much more but this is more personal that id like to be. I may remove this at some point and I hate to bitch and complain when people have it worse. I just don't know where to go from here",3.751013611615246,5.19757740263158,4.891397459165155,83.33236842105264,72.34210526315789,8.294010889292196,25.998185117967328,8.841846274778883,1.8490544464609804,1503,49,304,29,29,495,186,380,0.18,0.747,0.073,-0.9901,6,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,2,13,20,24,2,5,19,1,30,8,0,0,2,49,63,34,0,4,12,1,6,3,1,1,8,2,0,1,16,14,0,2,12,1,0,8,5,18,0,0,13,10,39,6,47,45,8,52,0,7,2,0,17,20,1,9,26,202,55,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06773365177689677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833173054672957,0.06357998928948387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577907979193604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315874987215536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018852453957552,0.06757923088246394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802407134072782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061007885405091236,0.08454720661368029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19743778656222366,0.0,0.0,0.1596662528802519,0.0,0.07820979314508572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474452152615675,0.0,0.0,0.23181387917724264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983817757476495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984308218387609,0.14660059431128478,0.08685214981805893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543994356928951,0.0,0.2436636381659569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524934391507022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516520541349605,0.06791751808365756,0.0,0.0,0.16797372754540202,0.062285081280321564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199151706637027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06416591075690332,0.0,0.08341152278891201,0.06496181402592055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324059758921833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23101264309516745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219809014885696,0.0,0.05617080286766884,0.0,0.058932796050720875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07331831860217412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05177800283207292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827455576530838,0.07294284936625701,0.10594739296093024,0.0667190498815114,0.0,0.0,0.07223299793561518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536281170694129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048950778644707565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06076501395809146,0.0,0.0,0.06088959371526785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588905219950446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061021842810451025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057451486749698626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17822323923039768,0.0,0.0,0.07301388870914696,0.0,0.15563395445457964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609398848451805,0.045069128090243535,0.060651415155677166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166733818529914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5006524020470384,0.0,0.0778692342573726,0.0,0.08354332309861004,0.0,0.04920611385937556
mentalhealth,treefrog07,2020/04/06,Are there any online counseling resources? I made a therapy appointment over a month ago and they kept rescheduling it now it’s 2 weeks away. Then I went online through my college’s free therapy resources to have an online session and they say they can’t see me until the same day 2 weeks from now. I’ve been struggling in new territory for a while and I really want to get help but I feel like the world is tying me down. Any advice?,2.18919540229885,4.590262402298851,3.3708045977011523,88.11298850574714,80.14942528735631,6.625287356321839,23.459770114942533,7.793537801064563,1.2712666666666659,347,12,69,6,9,112,64,87,0.024,0.865,0.11199999999999999,0.7190000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,3,0,3,3,0,1,6,0,5,0,0,1,0,9,12,7,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,4,3,10,3,10,8,1,17,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,0,12,43,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139333237017253,0.19406593276520465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29775628173206026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056895010570745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411900630348978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069627260669043,0.1564017799064561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11438053177687907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467424229321783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069568702858994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20715440144584896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17474576378143974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21144144930967826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140250499833651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740998573664674,0.0,0.0,0.17445679496167832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288704550600054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5007251283552723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12912905405656713,0.0,0.3512207131646627,0.0,0.0,0.2029478952194283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ftarhhdnr,2020/04/06,"an entitled, emberressing, lonely, narcissistic, judgmental, attention seeking, peice of shit with a huge moral complex don't think i know myself, dont think i want to. dont think i ever did. dont know what to do. just going through the motions for the last 12 years. more than half of my life. i dont know. cant even stop using 'i'. nothing feels really real. just a jumbled mess. crying but it doesnt register. feels like im acting for more attention",0.6599025974025956,3.14516570454546,2.952337662337662,85.09136363636365,96.5,6.150649350649352,21.058441558441558,7.447530270364453,1.3985850649350646,354,13,66,8,14,120,60,88,0.14300000000000002,0.8,0.057,-0.7169,0,2,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,5,0,9,2,1,1,1,20,20,1,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,11,0,0,3,7,3,0,1,1,2,7,1,9,19,2,8,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,5,40,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17120708830118686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7306764128735986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294538104061536,0.14098610228179728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576170206737454,0.11134784395367496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857996644993026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835770607007755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569730371950044,0.12704833263654886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008993999780227,0.07614630031378672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495537926361263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17740507855182774,0.09984918828444646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15999010321864499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303076110512146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29961022853435715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134614724936485,0.0,0.0,0.09193144585423467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10037001787349303
mentalhealth,thatsroughbudyeeyee,2020/04/06,"I have alot of issues with family friends and even excitement My sister's birthday was today and I got forced to come sit out with them in the living room. Instead of giving the tired little old me a decision. They are threatening me. (A threat doesn't have to be physical or even mental) first they physically threatened me by telling me they were gonna come in with a wooden spoon. Then my sister asked me if I was retarded because I wasn't coming out. Then they told me I would have more chores to do stacking wood by myself. (Typically a tier or two but I usually do it with my sister). Then they told me to leave because I wasn't excited or happy in the least. My mother made fun of my voice because it isn't amazingly cheerful or excited in the slightest. Then everyone told me to leave because I was ruining the mood and now I feel wonderful about being tired and bored. So now I feel like shit (I didn't read the rules I just figured this was a mental issue support website) and I honestly think about suicide all the time. I've tried reaching out to support lines but I don't know what to say. It feels like people around me hang out because of pity rather than actual friendship

TLDR
I feel like shit and wanna die",3.215097001763666,5.18587148559671,4.3162727807172265,84.72703703703705,74.88477366255144,7.426925338036449,25.97472075249853,8.269060116576782,1.7516770135214579,973,35,188,17,21,317,133,243,0.214,0.635,0.151,-0.9457,0,0,0,0,0,2,18.0,0,0,6,1,11,21,3,0,13,0,20,4,2,1,1,41,40,18,2,4,9,4,4,3,1,2,2,2,2,0,5,18,0,0,9,1,0,4,6,6,0,2,13,6,36,14,30,23,4,27,0,2,0,0,18,11,2,7,14,134,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.10406025811849308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09492764883126074,0.099689215758982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250181577009089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755695144597779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067016731001526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408626617074093,0.0,0.0,0.10189419513418847,0.0,0.0,0.1005258721923222,0.0,0.21567119221926007,0.2285399332560792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090703572278672,0.0,0.0,0.08238584179330997,0.0,0.0,0.10229389111876393,0.0,0.0,0.08528565277271062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351480990569834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22259821487939946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05860373989977614,0.0,0.0,0.22582187670291134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15628924434899955,0.10687616118547907,0.09416055042380116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009004993601591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21492575134365954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11189536595942166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392719743584315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666373435538412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480033455336003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218918338622012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664124838182345,0.24201599048398434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932035830077728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832732373792129,0.0,0.0,0.06217965457205636,0.24512220999341294,0.10107739532713624,0.30568258540256543,0.0,0.0723980820866924,0.0,0.10416678060822816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744325224159535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564097584774415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575035743149867,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaccount1291,2020/04/06,Not a big issue but just wondering why I do this (read below) As I have been alone a lot since this lockdown I have noticed myself doing weird things out loud like singing and pointing finger guns and saying pop pop. It’s really fuckin weird I know. Anyone else get this or something similar. Curious...,3.1515789473684244,5.842012842105267,3.8483333333333327,84.3925,78.47368421052632,6.60701754385965,23.535087719298247,7.793537801064563,1.4821719298245606,240,8,42,4,6,76,47,57,0.11800000000000001,0.8240000000000001,0.057999999999999996,-0.3291,0,2,1,1,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,2,0,5,2,1,0,0,10,8,5,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,5,1,3,7,1,4,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,3,1,27,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780271796541796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18770239048961526,0.2750527537239982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22425064033509148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402509881327991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28018594738465785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14752988376837564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114825147386908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228221615669902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056254426630477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537664894482322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685167936152625,0.0,0.17197219563692118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21347756169780488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22205977392602705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066614207531938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783423642856515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422290904902409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911162283304107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,balimoonshiner,2020/04/06,"OCD can be difficult to live with specially without understanding and support For some of us who has been diagnosed with ocd in some part during their life, we know for sure that we are the less understood of all the mental conditions. It’s not just about the out there common symptoms of repetitive activities, and perfectionism which in itself can be pretty bad if it’s out of control for some. But it’s definitely something related to how the habitual impulsivity of our mind creates certain tension in the thoughts we have every day. Thoughts, relationships, jobs,careers that take our importance and everything pretty much turns rigid, and then we get in the way to the things we need or want to do. Can you see my point? Who is struggling with this? And how are you coping with this?",8.405208333333334,8.565632437500003,7.98277777777778,69.89000000000001,61.43055555555557,11.644444444444444,37.444444444444436,11.20814326018867,4.30862777777778,637,28,110,16,8,202,95,144,0.10300000000000001,0.76,0.136,0.6577,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,8,2,1,1,5,9,0,3,7,0,12,3,0,3,3,40,24,11,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,12,16,0,2,5,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,4,1,12,4,24,18,7,12,0,0,1,0,14,7,0,5,4,88,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476417769955966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198324660074566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11403771906754755,0.0,0.0,0.17947400293371346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14898297949656106,0.0,0.1589192182360303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238394451558844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717858517719387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489697045270284,0.0,0.0,0.1561400191410954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17819835789867394,0.0,0.17854319111386727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998697428969552,0.1311137527008149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19148461702741376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16715710593712774,0.0,0.0,0.35978989125357025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898442453893484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14090690623423885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361287894121498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18485624339259327,0.0,0.0,0.20065930592239087,0.16665579493041274,0.18378923857101995,0.132950653182426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11747490200456863,0.0,0.0,0.2807591445428255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923351985799928,0.0,0.18408142012622009,0.2126991179895414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042961698113362,0.1403557282428042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17045332246070935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnhappyAct4,2020/04/06,"I just finished a 2 hour long meeting and am now crying in bed Just wanted to tell this to anybody lol

I love my job but having meetings everyday is kinda socially exhausting. They usually don't take up TWO HOURS though wtf.",3.338181818181816,5.563379181818185,4.790909090909089,80.30636363636366,75.36363636363637,8.036363636363637,29.181818181818183,8.841846274778883,2.7032909090909087,180,8,32,4,4,60,41,44,0.20800000000000002,0.7,0.09300000000000001,-0.7638,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,0,6,7,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,4,1,4,7,0,9,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,1,7,21,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987704708617417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5357147176751879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699101186100249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407043855816229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24548342443721335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277261619657364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045041551383596,0.0,0.23773302089884954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672307864106924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2656966892489162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2995607919628114,0.0,0.1604279451125973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw-away632,2020/04/06,"I'm confused on where my mental health stands. It's weird writing this down. I feel like there is nothing wrong but I know I shouldn't be ignorant to these huge factors..? When I say I dont know I honestly don't know where my mental health stands.
I'm almost turned 17. I'm in transition year in school (in Ireland, it's an optional, easy going year).
I've stopped caring about school, I cant say why. I still do well naturally but I dread going.
Some days I think I'm perfectly fine and I'm happy as could be. Some days I'd cry myself to sleep with suicidal thoughts racing through my head. I never have any sense of commitment to these thoughts but they're so very real. 
Socially, I'd say I'm pretty well liked by most people in my year but I do have self confidence issues, but nothing out of the odd for a teenager. I'm pretty outgoing.
I'm uncertain if I can say I have bulimia, it wouldnt be unusual for me to purge, but I've never done it long term or lost any weight from doing so. Im pretty sure my mum has found out about it, but I deny it to her. I'm not skinny in anyway from it. 
I used to love music, I was really amazing at playing guitar for my age when I was 14, but since then I've made no progress. I started piano two years ago and have advanced pretty far, but only because I'm afraid of my teacher. I dont really enjoy playing any of my instruments anymore. I don't remember where that passion came from. I think ever since I started piano the stress of it has built up. I wish I could take a break from music, but I've built it up to be so much a part of me I feel like my parents would be disappointed. I've told my mum before I dont like my piano lessons and she'd get angry, saying thing like ""I've put so much into this and you're going to quit?"" But I dont want to quit. I can teach myself at this point. I want to take piano at my own pace, not my teachers.
Recently my brother got engaged and has asked me to play the music at his ceremony, I feel like I should be honoured but honestly I am almost angry at it. I love all of my family and they're very supportive.
Today is a good day, quite relaxed and stress free, I think the social distancing has helped as I no loner have lessons. I'd commonly fake being sick to stay out of school for no reason before, and wonder why I did it. I'd actually be annoyed at myself for doing it because it didnt make sense.
I've had a fall out with my best friend recently. It wasn't dramatic, and were still friends but were just slowly distancing and I dont know why. She started hanging out with new people in her class, not in a way that she was trying to become more popular and ditch me. It was almost the opposite. I know it's bad saying this but shes started hanging out with the weird people. I've never said anything about then to her, I'm not gonna stop her from talking to them I'm not that kind if person. It's just since then weve grown apart. She often would leave a text I sent to her on read. Or one of the two new friends would try to start a fight with me over text. I feel paranoid that they're talking about me. I have other friends of course but this has made me feel that way about everyone. Maybe secretly my friends cant stand me. It sucks.

I realise that maybe it's not best to use reddit like a therapy session, but maybe that's not really the idea. I just want an outsiders view on this. Sorry for the long thread.",1.9277819831733536,3.491071780250352,3.678929752160333,89.6802127271484,77.37273991655077,6.7175357395289454,22.77436786064434,7.5177532532257745,0.8336670740326957,2666,79,584,36,61,894,289,719,0.135,0.637,0.228,0.9981,1,0,0,0,1,0,75.0,1,0,1,12,25,56,3,6,20,0,59,10,3,6,8,117,122,42,1,14,30,4,6,7,5,7,3,7,0,2,36,24,2,3,23,6,1,11,26,17,2,3,23,14,85,40,80,81,12,88,0,2,1,3,44,34,1,15,43,358,121,7,0.0,0.0,0.0512335466494372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04653909958528202,0.0,0.15771694655722307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071077420716384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052067030912998254,0.0,0.0,0.043203971064704014,0.0,0.04908148584657362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04383626524886347,0.06400842452465287,0.05798339268844655,0.08934921938438482,0.0,0.11019343062843832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06004732635794755,0.053528418968503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383578855919452,0.0,0.057670045344720734,0.10157669061859403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05372690197604595,0.30765476973570943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047490293726993565,0.0,0.05016709639303267,0.0,0.0,0.049493409449129715,0.0,0.13273078847886213,0.11252049094863574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05756479845141432,0.20281128189997152,0.0,0.02742968270181687,0.0,0.0895128361650767,0.044035471683964,0.04198996378504898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055888447846085466,0.0,0.0,0.053881323991103056,0.11161252961102472,0.0,0.0,0.03519041254133338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059267405148010724,0.05671024862074728,0.054797557839607186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05467186610278213,0.14426628841184275,0.0,0.0,0.05559113471229207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17954586138060347,0.0,0.0,0.09292372697427033,0.0,0.0,0.057311204457416685,0.0,0.09476867093215982,0.09935571051599236,0.035044923682915875,0.0,0.1582333781121112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105817616703315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718876865089798,0.0,0.12147636480360767,0.10141187096227748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075253411970536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03557613633568742,0.03992948852140808,0.0,0.0,0.05829631128763613,0.05685362662182735,0.0,0.10919305564796557,0.04584197699687816,0.0,0.0,0.04963055432684778,0.0,0.0,0.21365016633905246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052778154224894916,0.0,0.1675242988129007,0.05251535512892006,0.05975779990177385,0.10090073851149656,0.05397992375858772,0.10367709888494693,0.0,0.059473565712885014,0.0,0.04994061398352509,0.2505061187497869,0.0,0.15940189273841962,0.0,0.0,0.05477014699322708,0.0,0.0,0.1302884754122526,0.0,0.05253906327366331,0.10703661665004534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058770736375455136,0.1858029123696495,0.05595923781261069,0.0838549685402217,0.08778662043321117,0.12027977432349198,0.0,0.0,0.05742773416354546,0.05957768009883215,0.04948171026177541,0.0,0.07894865825257984,0.084396867421736,0.0,0.0,0.06003963776984288,0.0,0.03487942958387788,0.10092184638361576,0.0,0.08336009347537429,0.0,0.0,0.04976494910092996,0.05016709639303267,0.0,0.07128966587214637,0.05710617247513116,0.10257198492697016,0.0,0.0,0.09068826960595396,0.0,0.08663789022501818,0.0928996112887465,0.083345934431993,0.0,0.0639322538521284,0.09440967360453999,0.0,0.1421223589599045,0.0,0.060373728698044575,0.0,0.05693525499365384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118859267125494,0.057401763102602574,0.0,0.1352360708765035
mentalhealth,tjw5811,2020/04/06,"Please help Hello everyone,

Over the past 6-8 months I've gone through some major changes in my life and I cant seem to find out why. My everything is bad now. I cant seem to focus, remember anything, or understand anything new. I cant even understand math anymore which I was really strong in and was ahead by 2 (now 1 year) years and had straight A's in and AP stats class in 9th grade and now I'm now struggling to maintain a C in pre calc and my algebra is much better than my stats. I feel I have literally no motivation to study or work anymore. I can barely read anymore and I think so freaking slow that a 6th grader could probablythink faster than me. I also cant sleep and will go to bed at 10 to fall asleep around 2 or 3. My personality has also seen a major hit over the past 6 months. I have turned from an extreme extrovert who was funny and felt like conversation to anyone was the easiest thing in the world and now I have turned into an extreme introvert that can barely speak properly or make conversation and now prefers to be alone more often. I feel I'm kind of pushing away the people that mean the most to me. I have also become more hostile and pessimistic towards others randomly. I also feel like my emotions are sometimes numb and feel I should feel (as an example) I should feel sad but I'm not. I just feel sort of uncomfortable like I want to just teleport or go back in time to get rid of any emotion that occurs. I have been diagnosed with extreme undiagnosed ADD but I'm not sure that's the only illness at play at the moment. I feel many of the following: ADD (Obviously), Bipolar disorder, ASD, and OCD. I seem to match around or over 75 percent or more of all those illnesses. The list is in order from the most agreed to least agreed. I have no clue what the hell is going on with my life but I want my old life back and I dont know what to do. I am looking for some advice or what you did in a similar situation.

Thanks yall",3.4290416666666665,4.6910744875000026,4.802500000000002,84.37916666666669,72.875,8.133333333333335,26.833333333333336,8.648137234880735,1.8110833333333345,1545,54,324,28,30,515,210,400,0.11,0.7959999999999999,0.094,-0.8884,0,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,0,5,20,16,2,1,20,0,33,10,2,2,3,75,69,32,0,6,15,0,9,3,0,3,8,1,1,1,13,23,0,0,21,2,0,7,9,7,0,0,10,12,37,9,52,53,13,53,1,1,2,0,9,24,1,18,24,212,50,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814490511498957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09342265638540798,0.0,0.2885398429522805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134083916084386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683701267843607,0.06307173259550554,0.0,0.14845805479218546,0.1605988184770341,0.0,0.0,0.08474828156787602,0.13872041325830134,0.07531537620065219,0.0,0.09962164908274708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977684082780491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542235611049928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201941039648414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155370738725753,0.0,0.0,0.1033799572788476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057167374593835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029314952822681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05957794519369335,0.0,0.0,0.0861924189089899,0.08106825148356989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36487302778893105,0.06444073233252383,0.08660861056873938,0.0,0.08244351264926474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04712711860884227,0.0,0.1537925936958073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060460879688544814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393209343328986,0.04957297216414409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19113822335491684,0.13220525469736558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574743870535708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021091432214076,0.09145124571594997,0.0,0.09825703992925126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399765778646825,0.0,0.0663092660426656,0.0,0.0,0.08711820189716038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09465242101424852,0.0,0.0,0.06860311735994531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722171148570571,0.06253510282667532,0.07876140277235495,0.0,0.0990153319263425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022697771790696,0.0,0.05778607458744086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021819251761252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463510893748265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139146534662473,0.09026771083762464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921264585189767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429930875573064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501485248025112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830464051692289,0.0,0.0,0.0599265778199941,0.05779816311216977,0.0,0.0,0.05259784257025581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19622898250691387,0.0,0.1878081081179356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640762290286128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139378716702192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566854353625398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617499228251428
mentalhealth,nacholibrefan69,2020/04/06,"Committed while self isolating Last night, I had an episode because my roommate was stressing me out really bad and I self harmed. My roommates want me to go to a mental hospital now and commit myself. 

I'm scared of catching COVID-19 at the ER and even though it's bad in general, my self harm has gone way down in intensity and frequency in the last 2 months since starting meds and seeing a therapist. In addition, I self harmed because they were pushing my boundaries and pressuring me to not walk out of the situation. Do I really need to be committed?",7.326285714285714,7.483861390476192,7.64261904761905,71.43821428571431,63.66666666666667,11.952380952380953,38.45238095238096,11.538034831475384,4.703952380952382,446,22,79,13,6,146,71,105,0.215,0.7190000000000001,0.066,-0.9606,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,0,4,8,0,3,6,0,6,0,0,0,3,16,13,8,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,8,1,0,4,1,13,0,14,8,0,21,0,0,1,0,5,8,0,0,7,51,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648557695384468,0.19336730031831426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475658038111492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013842371332402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585671884564953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17617351499597805,0.0,0.15983573271794366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659636182112938,0.0,0.0,0.11760300700554305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883930055894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20321182772410026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587904761292175,0.0,0.1263870153942409,0.0,0.6618350969121899,0.0,0.0,0.13119903585687664,0.1782777696513618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226087135564998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816805788968594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841517043320047,0.0,0.0,0.1558278243655546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354886834001544,0.1258926340814285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,girl-distressed,2020/04/06,"I've been struggling with my self-esteem since I gained a significant amount of weight. Back in October I had surgery to biopsy and resect a brain tumor. Turns out this tumor is what has been making me have bad headaches and always be sleepy and thirsty for about a year prior. They started me on a bunch of medications, and I wasn't able to work for 3 months. I had to back out of nursing school or fail. I was basically at home for 3 months. I gained 30 pounds. Went from 120 to 150. 

I now have a round chubby face, emphasized by my short hair (shaved in January cuz I lost a bunch of hair from radiation). I have red stretch marks on my love handles, inner thighs, and outer thighs. I had to buy all new uniforms for work and I went from a size 4 to a 10/12 in womens pants. I barely fit any of my bras, panties, or tshirts. My fiance wants me to lose weight and he's not shy about his opinions on my weight... so much that I started sneaking junk food... that's how ashamed I am. 

I feel ugly. I know my fiance still finds me attractive. I've asked. But I want the comments to stop. I wish he would stop sending me all these weight loss and exercise videos. I want to feel okay with how I look now. I want to feel beautiful.",1.4491599999999991,3.5603823960000014,2.47,95.165,81.03999999999998,5.6000000000000005,20.8,6.742157984588678,0.1726399999999999,949,27,214,10,25,300,145,250,0.132,0.746,0.122,-0.6861,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,1,8,10,10,0,2,9,1,15,14,6,4,2,36,34,15,0,6,4,0,10,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,5,12,5,2,5,2,1,3,2,7,0,0,10,12,35,3,36,22,6,31,0,4,3,1,9,14,0,3,14,126,40,4,0.11927551046693105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924677967041234,0.0,0.0,0.08111143724904754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150650127620994,0.0,0.0,0.18343101022238872,0.09959006909848686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331509164607668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18092784576052687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901565570870976,0.0,0.14422842070749706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964306212901375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555070122854574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016138848728988,0.13343878671850465,0.13020330951162898,0.0,0.10765080502324792,0.0,0.07961732942619418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015752837530512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190409148999915,0.0,0.08768122420932463,0.0,0.0,0.115197031261712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071318440812645,0.0,0.0,0.1244303704392606,0.0,0.0,0.09866593481736108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688476404323541,0.0,0.0952535767333491,0.1994393351083395,0.0,0.12469266102983945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297375045629799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814071455812477,0.0,0.0,0.5809817549564671,0.0,0.22113918634609936,0.0,0.0,0.13716095061103425,0.0,0.0,0.1736679843687986,0.0,0.0,0.08472990045412933,0.0,0.0,0.07680951813948178
mentalhealth,Akivastern1,2020/04/06,"Great Resource for Coronavirus anxiety [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W5Zo4w6aS9k&t=16s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W5Zo4w6aS9k&t=16s)

With the Coronavirus pandemic bringing the world to a halt; Dr. Benjie Stern explains what health anxiety is and how you can overcome it.  Dr. Stern  explains that our desperate attempt to avoid discomfort and uncertainty fuels anxiety, and avoidance locks it in place.  Yet we can take back control.  We can learn to face our fears rather than running from them.  Part 2  Two Most Important Mindsets in Overcoming Anxiety:   MINDSET # 1  STOP THE  AVOIDANce (COMPULSIVE) BEHAVIORS MINDSET # 2  FACE YOUR FEAR AND LIVE WITH UNCERTAINTY YOUR NOISY BODY  Everybody has a lot of fear, panic, and anxiety, but the most important thing is our mindset and how we think about this. Whatever we are facing in our lives — if we try to take it as a learning opportunity and a way to grow, and we try to transform those fears and anxiety into support and opportunity.",10.004718614718618,13.125629493506501,7.498116883116883,64.16241341991342,59.259740259740255,11.107359307359307,38.807359307359306,11.038039088145766,5.215019047619047,818,40,109,23,12,236,94,154,0.214,0.6859999999999999,0.1,-0.8438,0,3,0,0,0,0,45.0,10,3,1,4,6,13,0,9,8,0,7,7,4,3,0,38,14,15,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,8,19,0,6,5,0,0,3,0,9,0,1,0,0,14,4,18,14,4,13,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,4,3,77,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638314346476045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5588289889961789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361798160027912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523643763563795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655260826104387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5480089117884166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422944174744145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12941420666990652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21501437954946714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350721620937878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284700612019488,0.0,0.13184302893613653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272024927723175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017881762844128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13816008349769093,0.0,0.0,0.18308120084757895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08088507131641169,0.07801227294053263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16532006907753535,0.0,0.11893173734295745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663922161130732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,livewellPHILLY,2020/04/06,"Our nonprofit's FREE depression support groups are now online! # [WWW.LIVEWELL-FOUNDATION.ORG](https://WWW.LIVEWELL-FOUNDATION.ORG)

# Led by trained peers with lived experience of depression, recovery, and living well -- and endorsed by world-renowned mental health experts! -- our support groups are always FREE AND CONFIDENTIAL.",16.184999999999995,20.30485035714285,9.255714285714287,53.63928571428573,45.42857142857143,13.219047619047622,49.714285714285715,12.45797560212912,7.7593714285714315,273,15,26,8,3,69,33,42,0.129,0.556,0.315,0.8674,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,2,0,0,0,2,7,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,5,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,7,4,4,0,2,0,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,13,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20906604182045435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4328147582663306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457776642913333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670745567182921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4437292595912957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25320806877611024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5702471777372243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22591031504907816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ExoticEnergy,2020/04/06,How can one manage time based things consistently How can I ever manage time based things professionally? If the positive things that I'm supposed to retain in my memory and have on my mind always dissipate from me with time. I'm in introvert (currently) and need to have a private alone time space I can occupy from time to time in order to feel like I'm *acquiring* energy during that time. I haven't really been able to have that (even though I have money to spend) and private rooms are wildly unreasonably expensive around here. I feel like I don't have the energy to even send real text messages and make phone calls in a normal logical manner. Any advice and recommendations please? I will keep trying. I would gladly pay for space and have a little bit of savings. Thanks for listening.,7.064316816816818,7.707166047297298,7.486846846846848,70.67496996997002,64.20270270270271,11.172372372372372,27.93093093093093,10.980518767755715,3.1565381381381368,637,17,110,17,9,209,88,148,0.023,0.835,0.142,0.9465,1,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,8,5,0,0,5,0,15,0,0,3,1,24,25,10,0,4,1,0,2,2,0,2,0,1,1,0,6,8,0,2,3,0,4,1,2,0,0,1,1,3,11,5,19,22,1,21,0,0,0,0,5,10,0,1,11,71,17,4,0.14850704664377748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14511936722433144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538085129410506,0.0,0.0,0.12356975945908825,0.0,0.0,0.10098988424139056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322027568352282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621312319471425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516422987065077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961750074098018,0.13433312587817164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501792498411547,0.21218692759085125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13199988654361045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14510608321895055,0.1488430749380743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912960681083756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994978251001706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011609336040563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550537467934374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006322181983994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16301614138574216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690335314107515,0.0951374168202646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13672533599862588,0.0,0.0,0.2959844488508607,0.0,0.14590741931605145,0.0,0.6061695721201413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008265364125607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549514506041556,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Oodledoodlex,2020/04/06,"Parallel Anxiety My depression hasn't been this bad since I last ran away from home.

Firstly, I wanna say that I don't plan on doing this again . I have friends who are my family and who always will be my family so I don't plan on running away. Nor do I have any 'other' intentions like I have done before for the same reason - I love them all and care for them all.

Part of the cause of my poor mental health is the isolation, I've always struggled living at home even if it's only a 'normal' holiday. I struggle to be myself at home due to transgender issues (it took me running away across half the country before they accepted my name but I still can't wear proper clothes at home) and there's nearly always a negative atmosphere which hasn't helped my mental state at all.

Another cause of my poor mental health is being scared. I've had a really bad past with friendships and with my own self and I'm scared that it's happening again . Last time this happened, it took a lot out of me and mostly destroyed who I was. Lots of people have helped bring me back up , and honestly it meant the world that I had everyone's help, but I'm scared that I'm slowly going back to who I was before and that I'm letting them down  . I also lost a lot of other friends and people I loved due to having the depression which just makes things spiral out even further.

There have been some tearful nights lately, and plenty of dramatic mood swings but I am doing my very best to get better and I am trying to get as much help as I possibly can - which is where you guys come in. University is only 5 months away and I'm sure that things can only get better from there.

Any advice or support would be well appreciated.

Thank you",4.913269027484148,5.433260659883722,5.704112050739957,82.01699788583511,68.8546511627907,8.812684989429176,25.8107822410148,8.841846274778883,1.7299523255813951,1353,35,270,22,22,443,174,344,0.135,0.693,0.172,0.9376,0,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,4,7,15,27,1,5,11,0,37,5,1,5,4,44,61,22,0,4,6,0,0,1,2,2,2,1,4,2,25,17,0,0,3,1,2,8,7,11,1,2,12,1,37,15,39,42,13,44,0,3,0,2,22,20,0,7,16,198,62,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562376309858186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188806006274369,0.1931818693993596,0.0,0.0,0.10525452566807536,0.08114925148626523,0.05920247335525058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908385440969103,0.119014929512916,0.12923338359825665,0.0,0.0,0.19755735138510172,0.0,0.08121511840462999,0.13688879473282772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0789033767212194,0.15899991061077853,0.0,0.06666388381356797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13331029017986498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919594989671591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222958223961988,0.0,0.0,0.07394863106340473,0.0,0.0,0.14591117041137058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582715525388994,0.0,0.0,0.11958130120363175,0.0,0.12129788041218692,0.0,0.043982026553494535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07662740674475199,0.13686990583942646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645220546470631,0.0,0.0,0.20748921273821092,0.0,0.3105104330773842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080774146386903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12616494143190765,0.08729831054763049,0.0,0.0,0.0791356296729098,0.0,0.03780842030736595,0.0,0.06833602046561027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447937829643773,0.19738041502275847,0.13969342431595833,0.0,0.051657845847204314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23397012564660746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061771265990861475,0.0,0.05688991575757709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262445691536099,0.07582491706507492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17657376413139245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380488730573557,0.07387668225679778,0.1073037584041992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724461721828064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04957745895008586,0.07956891576066781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154294310565345,0.2324400621793303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073374152571235,0.0,0.0,0.06401708884107174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0618030599462347,0.0,0.0,0.16180784530655046,0.0,0.0,0.08782026870213604,0.07293834005993026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07124951422335367,0.0,0.0,0.1028277997113027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045126224605273366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17196434400714788,0.05254213996073436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385413788121305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0695821227872398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054975018225973726,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImpossiblePen9,2020/04/06,How do I take life not too seriously? It feels like a fear that keeps coming back of adapting to others.... HOW TO STOP?,0.4287500000000009,2.795221041666672,2.2800000000000007,92.965,88.58333333333334,4.866666666666667,16.333333333333336,6.42735559955562,-0.3753166666666661,91,2,20,1,3,30,22,24,0.228,0.631,0.141,-0.5385,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,7,5,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,1,3,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30987713132475764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34714322251266017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4534797338679496,0.20376562557249736,0.2878986416870996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3581991451616197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846462316950458,0.19688227137076625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33692061643100546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30300096385527303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GunMetalGazm,2020/04/06,"Had the worse case of night terrors last night. So I went to sleep without my meds. Sometimes I can actually fall asleep without them. I woke up around 3 AM and I was soaking with sweat. Like I just did a triathlon.  I sleep with the heat off because the cold helps me sleep faster. My pillow and sheets were soaked and my body was like 102 degrees
 I was hot as hell. I know a dream caused this. But I couldn't remember what it is. I have had this happen before. But it was never this bad.",0.5875666666666675,2.933357690000001,1.3480000000000023,100.24066666666668,87.1,4.133333333333334,18.333333333333336,5.46131890053228,-0.6425666666666663,379,10,87,2,12,116,70,100,0.162,0.746,0.092,-0.8857,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,3,5,1,1,5,0,13,6,6,1,1,16,17,7,0,1,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,0,2,1,0,2,4,3,0,0,10,2,15,2,10,6,0,10,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,7,57,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.17465116114650686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593233035652172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14943440629684324,0.1090998612967581,0.0,0.152292257061499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19879789414842566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838538664068017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826462597776814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199613693274538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983585031027789,0.14588632281703606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17487366450812197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19879789414842566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13803448165174534,0.0,0.0,0.3359067850615045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20274074290331304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5373046962226586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17700819460201306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659091278866199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3450458476126329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823880777366116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,joebird31,2020/04/06,"I cannot get over my past Hello, I’m an 18 year old male who is currently doing online school. I am about to go off to college but my past is holding me back and driving me crazy. I overthink every intricate detail and I think about all the relationships I messed up and I just think about how much my anxiety and depression messed up things for me. I went to 2 high schools plus online school for my senior year. I gained so much weight and I feel like the entire world absolutely hates me. I decided to do online school so that I could just get away and focus on losing weight and be around people that support me. It’s gone pretty good but I just can’t get over how much I messed up in the past. I’ve changed so much and I feel like if I could go back, everything would be different and I could’ve had a great experience in high school. I don’t know how to prove that I’ve changed and show the world that I’m better. I just feel so hated and can’t stop overthinking. Please help.",1.5864705882352936,3.6649743137254913,2.7909411764705894,93.22023529411766,80.37254901960785,6.2368627450980405,19.513725490196077,7.365786028017652,0.30872431372549025,776,19,173,11,20,249,104,204,0.163,0.665,0.172,0.2409,2,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,17,13,2,0,6,0,15,2,0,3,2,37,33,22,0,4,7,0,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,13,2,2,8,1,0,5,4,7,0,0,3,5,27,6,22,25,5,31,0,2,0,0,5,15,0,1,13,109,34,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585235584207403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826786919286272,0.0,0.0,0.0931582224911936,0.1524862437716451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08769344404380527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097830638384374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374986300587145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540098913989425,0.0,0.0,0.10359457654224144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354132018938297,0.0,0.08911300700097151,0.09699140446618892,0.0,0.0,0.15040536254077136,0.14167093347658452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541124325506825,0.0,0.11270273485948334,0.08316547048834919,0.0,0.10931737165102036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19578762242995545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664606759905528,0.20952278503271227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05449231400306756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688303844240233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109276961157298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915576927318791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404519281153002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.283960453341979,0.06874073332060715,0.0,0.0,0.10884105436693607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087502145441923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645403215707228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5017444989751912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289698408713546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251851306564024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587335302155499,0.1270674529128569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414851376704595,0.0,0.09191652991430446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043598702166781,0.0,0.0,0.12770354252315025
mentalhealth,BeartonBeast,2020/04/06,"Concentration on what is important eludes me. I need a system of thought or action to keep myself focused. I wouldnt say I have adhd, but I deal with depression and take medication for it. My inability to ""keep going"" on what is important to me is a problem and I ask for advice or personal ways you stay on task. Perhaps I need to figure out a time management system. Feel free to message me if that's more comfortable",3.496898954703834,5.479678585365857,5.527351916376302,76.29865853658539,74.12195121951221,9.075958188153312,28.787456445993037,9.606745405546679,2.9892383275261327,332,14,61,9,7,115,57,82,0.135,0.701,0.16399999999999998,0.1505,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,3,0,5,1,0,0,0,17,14,6,0,5,4,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,4,4,0,2,3,0,1,2,1,2,0,0,1,2,12,3,13,12,1,11,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,3,1,44,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28612046752100306,0.23264460825853694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225684403585975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454453708576079,0.2050540661094672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12037811842800825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530378440194532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4232248594033387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398360040155013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3530599105106465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20787833023319416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278060860533617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18932718107703725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25375678973007465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17900313562845488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18900534155544688,0.13882372967601567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889732382465516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fadedawayintothesoun,2020/04/06,"I’m so alone when I shouldn’t be I really don’t get it...

I have a loving partner and his family has taken me in as one as their own. I should be happy...but here I am feeling so alone. I miss being social and able to talk to friends, since moving/running away they’ve all stopped and turned their backs on me. 

It’s stupid, I lived most of my life isolated from society. My family made me be a “family” person and keep a tight leash on me. As their grip slowly broke I loved the freedom but now here I am. It’s bullshit, I gave my friends everything I could but I’m still alone. Damn I miss talking to those others then my partner, no fault on them...",0.6870177267987501,2.677907175182483,2.6103701772679884,93.77695255474457,83.08759124087591,5.958081334723673,19.2747653806048,7.1686216300943375,0.2595655891553705,501,13,114,7,14,167,85,137,0.23600000000000002,0.6579999999999999,0.106,-0.9376,0,3,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,4,0,8,10,2,0,4,0,12,3,0,1,1,16,25,13,0,3,2,0,3,0,4,2,1,0,0,3,5,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,3,3,25,4,13,15,3,11,0,3,0,2,16,5,1,1,6,79,30,0,0.1597812919343667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4964556927828696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501197834508348,0.122861950786977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757236008753636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360112243342954,0.0,0.4518827455946992,0.0,0.08079022209266716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468932595877199,0.0,0.08347913030608152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202095377816626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285825178742732,0.0,0.0,0.14108980810701574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28841770849780607,0.1511889217783124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827193858706413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13951486106535615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235998704696593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217273582241998,0.0,0.0,0.16287690539452315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760154613669414,0.13358431458977724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568523000981531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737961632715961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PDiddyWreckingBall,2020/04/06,"Plz help I can't deal with my own problems right now. If anyone could just tell me I'm going to be alright, plz do. I miss someone very special to me and it's killing me not to see her. I'm content and happy being independent but I really need some love right now.",-0.2538345864661622,1.918813491228072,2.2839598997493766,93.19105263157898,89.52631578947368,4.660651629072682,20.423558897243108,6.1826913282559595,0.11929273182957399,207,7,46,2,7,71,44,57,0.094,0.645,0.261,0.8534,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,0,0,1,5,1,0,1,0,12,12,4,1,4,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,1,8,4,4,9,2,5,0,1,1,1,5,2,0,2,2,28,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18874502970524132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21552136266519845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2782914291499424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15341044485396907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873511335442717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18093193358117146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29864340197542705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436271364328788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001535957436312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2582916150968008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17292745760615166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4610465221686553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151034759278788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287152935827006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359353396259063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227248825428498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowAwayNumber42623,2020/04/06,"Im scared of myself I'm 15 and for the last 3 years I've been having suicidal thoughts and a few weeks ago I got out of a relationship with a girl I really liked and since then they've been getting worse, more frequent and very detailed. A couple days ago I was lying in bed and for what every reason I thought about having a Glock 17 in my hand and pushing it against my head and pulling the trigger and I could imagine what the firearm looked like in my head with a lot of detail. I haven't told my friends because I'm scared what they'll think or say about me and I'm scared to go see a therapist because if it ends up on my record I'm scared that it'll ruin the career in the Army that I want. I'm scared that I'll actually commit and will hurt the people around me and that my ex will blame herself. I'm so fucking scared.",5.8435518102372015,4.405806039325841,6.1772659176029965,86.00100499375782,67.25842696629213,9.034706616729087,31.013732833957555,7.3871296695380915,1.6586983770287145,657,20,151,5,9,212,101,178,0.21899999999999997,0.7140000000000001,0.067,-0.9822,0,0,0,1,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,5,12,1,6,13,0,11,4,3,2,1,27,28,15,1,3,2,1,1,2,1,4,0,1,1,1,10,15,0,0,5,0,0,3,1,9,0,0,7,4,18,3,19,16,3,20,0,2,2,1,8,8,1,3,11,87,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.1141697598024184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074171385178092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041499133447499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263752816712566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341059197152728,0.12945219403824526,0.0,0.07545177673527857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10362240524236943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857291603379713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09038966401516796,0.1081595342527914,0.06112479986894258,0.0,0.06649067308787285,0.0,0.09357119295788496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401402292132003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12524503688258068,0.0,0.12637414129590166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536613627496747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431521062670193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824591802184207,0.0,0.0,0.09946454402432224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811092584885316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494967544454087,0.12028983610757925,0.0,0.1256083139396187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303872585149066,0.7027914535994805,0.0,0.09322947281457987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677906317008522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12797299902565196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13583963715913094,0.0,0.07496535449890658,0.0,0.18576113643491385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11179326280821177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653271892789482,0.06900639001985323,0.0,0.09384593456819763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922739527935995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07534062512907662
mentalhealth,Skeletonsaint47,2020/04/06,"Can anyone recommend any self help books? Specifically with dealing with the past. 

I struggle with bipolar disorder and I fortunately found a medication that works now. However, I’m struggling with dealing with the fallout of my actions and decisions when I was not medicated, especially when manic. I hurt a lot of people, myself and struggle with the shame and embarrassment every day. 

Can anyone recommend any books that help you deal with the past? I’m seeking out therapy as well, but I need to really work on myself and I feel like a good book would help......",5.9609158415841605,8.1694377029703,6.7416707920792085,69.21468440594059,68.00990099009901,10.19851485148515,33.41707920792079,10.411451182825502,4.092137623762376,452,21,72,13,8,149,64,101,0.127,0.72,0.154,0.5897,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,2,4,9,0,5,7,0,4,3,0,0,0,21,9,9,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,13,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,6,1,0,2,1,10,3,13,6,1,9,0,1,0,0,8,2,0,1,7,48,12,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934215004348624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19887939781294106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171660016656594,0.4398507759299132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16299016059541294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982186660552292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719079342863356,0.10159808137116652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15593088053227616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11928279189807388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2859701846343918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15224358481190697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947883084841766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090569910679355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865323339732705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545026444869296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715197021422421,0.09859364156127357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110626300396636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483607600006505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4460204825779445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263469752599274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786793259031226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20706772838318616,0.0,0.0,0.10102511454219523,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-H_N-,2020/04/06,Anxiety attack What to do if a certain person is the trigger for an anxiety attack? Should I avoid/cut contact with the person or is there a better way to handle it?,5.517272727272727,5.747254212121213,7.293484848484847,72.16022727272728,67.48484848484848,9.024242424242424,31.65151515151515,8.841846274778883,2.8416787878787875,131,5,22,2,2,46,26,33,0.262,0.606,0.132,-0.6072,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,2,0,5,0,4,0,0,1,1,6,4,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,2,4,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,19,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4420453086199557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6573753641875073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555258508845727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5045467895553493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293308796597955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ACat2Cats,2020/04/06,"Want to escape Here goes.


I feel like there are two people inside me. One that is the me that the people in my daily life sees, the swedish 15 year old [my name]. Insecure, mentally unstable and depressed. Reallyfucking depressed.


But whenever I go online or go someplace where there are no limitations, like in video games, I become someone completely else, someone I truly feel on the inside. This person I call Cat, a bubbly and adorable girl that is very energetic cute. Also a weeb lmao.


I feel like my most genuine self when I'm this ""Persona"" perhaps, and I HATE the real me. I just really want to escape this world, I have thought about killing myself, lucid dreaming whatever, and VR is too expensive. Playing video games on my computer just isn't enough. I just want to become someone entirely different, I wanna be Cat.",4.681548582995956,6.967537539473685,5.505526315789479,76.41599190283404,71.63157894736842,8.361133603238867,30.113360323886642,9.057496981413335,2.9064670040485843,654,28,109,14,13,213,96,152,0.133,0.6709999999999999,0.196,0.7174,1,0,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,0,1,11,11,2,1,7,0,8,1,0,0,0,21,20,8,1,4,5,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,3,6,4,0,1,4,6,1,2,2,5,0,2,1,4,19,6,9,18,2,11,0,2,1,0,7,6,0,2,6,70,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193085057774709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295409042588493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234135166793245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15642460282983311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25699709297715584,0.0,0.0,0.15587351673376926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463047676847301,0.0,0.0,0.1541548522404158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263073374819773,0.2131650840905432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695781016190362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472958636432892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16505845223332388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053784720201574,0.21866250750654595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15035008938807315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655153622992332,0.0,0.10109612075557764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068614053588446,0.13026839110411953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16981275588651246,0.09557598899661512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188864263258865,0.0,0.15563942475320608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3792287937165653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844150242544654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14573856020326464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309873294771985,0.26399129552390915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960745288838901
mentalhealth,thowaway_im,2020/04/06,"Guy living with a female roommate So she obv doesn't have a boyfriend. but when she came home from grocery shopping today she called up this guy who must be the world's best listener. Because she's literally telling him every minutia of her day. in fact, i think this is the same guy she calls every time she's walking home from class, back when covid wasn't a thing -- why don't i have someone like that? someone that i could just randomly call and know that they'd be there for me and listen to me talk about my day. But anyway, while she's talking really loudly to this guy -- and i can't even block it out because it's so friggin loud -- and so i'm like, fuck it, i'm going to be present and experience this feeling. it feels like someone's shoving shards of ice, nice sharp ones, into my heart, one after the next. My neck is all tense. tears are welling up in my eyes. i'm invisible to her. i don't matter in the slightest. i disgust her.

I know that a lot of you are just going to assume i'm a creep or a loser or something. that's why i haven't told any of my friends or my parents. i don't want to appear weak in front of people i know, especially as a guy. i used to think that i could ""toughen up"" and get used to it. but it's been 8 months and why haven't i gotten used to it??",2.266400764685436,3.369408660583943,3.6671845672575607,92.00991484184915,75.53284671532846,6.240945429266598,23.996524157108087,6.42735559955562,0.4760874522071603,999,30,230,7,21,329,142,274,0.128,0.787,0.084,-0.9028,1,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,1,2,13,11,2,0,11,0,22,5,3,3,3,42,47,20,0,4,8,1,3,3,1,1,1,4,2,5,19,11,0,1,8,1,1,6,8,4,1,2,5,8,34,7,30,35,4,28,0,1,1,1,30,10,1,7,15,147,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682766548780117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720277314544892,0.0,0.12240798917127613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10536547621099876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075643359173938,0.11483289159471136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16032530677531048,0.0,0.0,0.1295016870839769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06631443028786461,0.0,0.16918566373792618,0.0,0.0,0.09821220866683927,0.0,0.0,0.10153231571920876,0.07172705332604272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757016793644939,0.09281982987025254,0.0524557873134708,0.0,0.11412129326575125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4970677480422419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897659542414575,0.0,0.0,0.20142234778676926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655345814321258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14715371800445853,0.0,0.08865661320408917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853580048974884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013974473147288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677843449409986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13606969219051512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148429747827797,0.0,0.0,0.06960595407347125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431995266670988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2552103129434195,0.07729419719071523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613982988984607,0.08775558310528574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670248284519491,0.12866681608463193,0.0,0.0,0.058545086660466615,0.0,0.09516914993446758,0.09593820559772652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601447107859647,0.0,0.0,0.059219572512515375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027326004405292,0.0,0.2717909760434703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bruh_moment1758,2020/04/06,"How can you stop the pain How do you stop the pain of feeling suicidal? It just doesn't end, people say the people I know will miss me, people say I've made an impact on them, people say they will grieve over me, but they won't,.I haven't made shit for them, I haven't made them give a true fuck about me,.I think they would miss me, but they won't, they'd be better off without me, everyone would, if I had the guts to, I would end it all, there's no end to the pain, is there? I don't want a counselor, I don't want anti depressence, I just want an end to the pain",5.377466666666662,3.2408880399999984,5.751000000000001,90.93716666666668,68.6,8.973333333333334,25.63333333333333,6.42735559955562,0.6105733333333334,435,6,112,2,6,140,64,125,0.314,0.631,0.055,-0.9833,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,8,1,7,12,2,0,10,0,17,7,2,5,2,24,30,5,2,7,6,0,1,0,0,6,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,8,10,0,0,4,4,21,2,10,18,1,9,0,4,0,1,14,3,2,1,6,70,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10500891832000284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226380764061348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4206456944521147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345363620695068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06003453128546603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097659388695116,0.0,0.11389867591473468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06525207229126141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3370416302645539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5053574206015099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292556304170219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832616606070974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218768228962546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19853075052297486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987367674094116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607875326114286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100938555491996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445353417331025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530316908611454,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,megan0123456,2020/04/06,"What is the best way to handle the coronavirus crisis? I am interested to know if what I am doing to cope with coronavirus is what I should be doing? Is it healthy? If not, what is the best way to handle it? 

My main technique is distraction. Distracting myself with work, TV, social media, going for a walk, cleaning the house etc. Ordinarily when I speak to my psychologist in normal times she tells me distraction is not a good method of dealing with things. So what should I be doing differently? Also, is avoiding the news to stop anxiety a good idea, or should I be forcing myself to watch some of it so I am informed?

Thanks 😊",3.3771074380165267,5.6119729917355405,4.790909090909093,80.30636363636367,75.28099173553719,7.705785123966942,25.049586776859503,8.575989854853784,1.8993239669421482,496,17,92,10,11,165,69,121,0.17300000000000001,0.703,0.124,-0.5586,1,1,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,4,10,0,4,8,0,19,0,0,0,0,19,22,7,0,6,5,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,9,3,0,2,3,1,0,2,2,4,0,0,0,2,13,6,14,16,5,8,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,4,3,77,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16597736252148088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587748973273781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4356210595712333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139745529886108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21684518656761406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314726984801502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795523657225344,0.3481655616725452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23948440455903225,0.0,0.23429826697809464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406384765401277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033545684759216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115707083992865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17352078246043756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814075229872376,0.19108381228527246,0.0,0.0,0.13788675047065674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102385715341127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3294864681238927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109860108403902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adam123465,2020/04/06,"Competitive gaming making my nerves act up. Hi, my name is adam, im 17 from canada, my birthday was just yesterday and i need some help on some things ive been feeling. When i play a game, Ex, League of legends. I can only play it without barley remembering anything at all from it, im a high plat player but recently ive been performing bad and everytime after i finish a game, win or loss. My hands all the way to my elbows want to shake my head feels like its about to explode, It hurts. Ive been searching online and cannot find anything on what would be causing this. Some information: I have multiple disorders such as, depression, anxiety, bipolar, Borderline personality, and other things that haven't been diagnosed yet. I want to fix this, as it stops me from going towards my dream aka becoming a top league of legends player. I can play like 1 game a hour because of this, which is not enough. But most of all I just want to go back to being myself after a game.",3.8013263525305407,5.425776183246075,5.129926701570682,80.9630226876091,72.50785340314134,8.234694589877838,27.39301919720768,8.841846274778883,2.1583065270506108,765,28,147,15,15,255,117,191,0.11900000000000001,0.725,0.156,0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,4,7,11,0,1,7,0,18,5,3,2,3,32,27,10,0,5,7,1,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,14,4,0,1,5,9,0,4,4,5,0,0,5,3,20,6,24,19,8,22,0,3,0,0,11,7,0,5,12,102,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466975672491601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26821687399696337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531201373947615,0.136071126600182,0.09934352741418877,0.17998489429758702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16741260163390728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14036374245652816,0.1654086686816504,0.0,0.0,0.1867749716516674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16838907964006605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648026155541842,0.11642407553095856,0.0,0.0,0.148949420596065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852364686789445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16725175871064646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10923373724563712,0.17218420145538935,0.0,0.0,0.1604902442419076,0.0,0.17446017068463707,0.0,0.3520659150953361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15923546077504033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10878212867998367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208383995764941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12394419225341965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229700956804398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609108299694733,0.0,0.18461050556062225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13624819855153264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165368446287988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883675125381823,0.1293560837279611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709493675807346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11576749685867845,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1994Nicky,2020/04/06,Quarantine feels Does anybody who’s 25 ever feel embarrassed or feel bad if you’re still a Virgin and haven’t met anybody new yet since your last first real relationship ... or is it just me.,7.2964864864864865,6.9138620270270295,7.252027027027029,76.01966216216219,63.864864864864856,10.643243243243244,32.013513513513516,10.125756701596842,2.976848648648649,153,5,29,3,2,49,34,37,0.158,0.8420000000000001,0.0,-0.7184,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,4,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,10,6,4,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,5,0,6,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,6,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555750929317344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678642812134375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27687888472539124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4643098595348573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603627770629938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495068668280353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2956267852475993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3484011508870001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32862961720776895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532035140492401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444464789117781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon4ymous4,2020/04/06,"Struggling and in need of a boost/advice (m20) 

Recently struggling to not feel like a failure, in almost every aspect of life. 

I was a very bright student in school but when it came to my A levels I really did tail off only achieving sub par grades, I was told by my teachers the best thing that would happen to me would be to fail and that I’m just another statistic.

I ended up working at a hotel and I’ve been there almost 4 years. When it comes to work I’m very passionate about the hospitality industry however I have been stuck on a 0hr contract since starting, repeatedly asking for a full time contract yet change of management etc has seen me slip down the line and be forgotten about yet working very hard.
I now find myself out of a job as the hotel is closed and it’s very challenging to keep occupied.

I moved out of my parents house 6 months ago however with there being no job for me I now have had to move back in to my parents with no job. I am one of 5 kids, the youngest, and with this comes a lot of expectation, my parents do not understand my situation. I used to work 60/70 hour weeks at a hotel however they insist it’s time I get a “proper job”. I couldn’t agree more however the lack of full time contract where I work it’s easy to agree with them and beat myself up over it.

Few and far between unfortunately, I have always been a popular person but when it comes to relationships I freeze, I have no confidence in myself to try and start something, now everybody is isolating it will now be a longer wait until something happens.

Currently living with my parents I find them hard to open up to , we argue a lot but considering I have comments across the dinner table of “you don’t know what work is” I find very hurtful and feel like I have no one to speak to.

I’m feeling depressed about this, any feedback is greatly appreciated, opening up anonymously helps as not many would understand my pain if I explained, trying my best to stay positive. 

Thanks",5.018692307692309,5.881803535897441,5.902564102564102,79.46076923076926,68.76923076923077,9.076923076923078,30.128205128205128,9.265573868473778,2.534666666666667,1569,59,304,30,26,517,201,390,0.133,0.722,0.145,0.8788,13,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,1,1,3,12,17,17,1,2,21,0,30,4,0,1,0,57,58,20,0,8,8,4,6,2,0,4,2,1,0,2,14,25,1,2,10,3,0,6,9,7,0,2,11,9,41,10,59,38,10,58,0,3,2,1,19,26,0,5,27,212,55,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449538188687044,0.06757720359981044,0.0,0.1526754965697488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0634331350573177,0.0,0.0,0.05184201211161178,0.07993842453228013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126888125450656,0.0,0.0,0.058619554628258824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16000661730237986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719185448526756,0.0,0.0,0.08064589609261195,0.19700757854167808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566058451397526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752105854516371,0.0,0.08502151736676128,0.0,0.0,0.06423077730070004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156392228933806,0.1089237536286054,0.0,0.0,0.20903060537270635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039829332091441766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404870473314466,0.0,0.0,0.1348276717073244,0.0,0.13658211247934335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051098317205498164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507553632646963,0.08796427222293048,0.08161051124088489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026035499271061,0.06776064522035151,0.0,0.0,0.04189643732462425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05384661739071237,0.07448856269331437,0.0,0.06731637956945435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962353623284234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728972496767912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084957771310605,0.16205022359832638,0.0,0.05652684809528522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331681660689758,0.05797970307747063,0.08111878579218852,0.0,0.3385971565507796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656494518676859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04883771431279843,0.0,0.07527228161287257,0.08184722502280306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715329157468237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306189066900297,0.08569066948580484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173779446013498,0.0,0.0,0.10791821372162848,0.0812557363733123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939351249540198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701864011237266,0.0,0.0,0.0506467537068634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335869033786169,0.0,0.0,0.07284524447558112,0.0,0.10351631871124653,0.0,0.0,0.1587254160344775,0.0,0.06584205231609352,0.0,0.31450685549176605,0.0,0.0,0.061150644277980525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33299734492692096,0.0,0.0,0.16246421002520994,0.0,0.0,0.0490924597655411
mentalhealth,chickenlittlefearsme,2020/04/06,"Advice for a tired teen Hey all,

I'm Lauren and I'm 19.  Since my freshman year of high school (five years ago), I believe I've had depression.  It's affected me enormously, and it's getting worse.  I frequently have suicidal thoughts (don't worry, I don't believe I'm in any danger to myself.  They're casual thoughts).  The problem is, my parents believe they've given me the perfect life so there's no way I could have a mental illness.  I'm too afraid to go the therapist I have on-campus (and she's backed up over a month anyway), and I can't pay for an online therapist because a) I can't afford it, and even if I could afford it, b) my parents check my bank account weekly.  Does anyone have any suggestions on what to do? I'm tired of life feeling like this.

Any and all help is appreciated.

Thanks and much love to all of you",1.2456339869281052,3.47903369411765,3.2945098039215712,88.26418300653597,82.64705882352942,6.130718954248366,23.562091503267972,7.3871296695380915,1.1151111111111116,648,24,133,10,18,219,100,170,0.168,0.6779999999999999,0.154,-0.6784,4,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,0,1,6,9,1,1,8,0,14,6,0,1,4,19,27,9,1,4,1,2,1,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,3,1,4,1,5,4,0,1,4,1,17,5,13,21,4,15,0,1,0,1,8,6,0,1,8,78,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269594054576393,0.11516903966679168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650566062771467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908452923179432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09990288814274847,0.0,0.07919995067351834,0.0,0.0,0.439136721144957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20746613802395347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190262484397856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136966303271236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581301993928661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06569305199089394,0.09281712940208056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678794872114824,0.0,0.07383832426818872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708475355086798,0.13727094876719947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835371363076321,0.06347389189372055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172607218340632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093198411818385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103703424469134,0.0,0.09550846962880928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885285812120302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431891485241553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148917126563467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10747377815352004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14211484650096193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961578734386245,0.0,0.30170159847151257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20628894838199666,0.0,0.298655113267966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031269546918744,0.10421651979278353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194327266934247,0.13240279674495525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16733250696670846
mentalhealth,j_schneider810,2020/04/06,"Trying to find help Hi everyone, 25m in the US of A here.

Amid all the pandemic craziness, I've been feeling my anxiety and disorganization really spiral.  
I used to struggling with this, and mood severely in college (\~year ago) but working from home and being cooped up have not helped.

I'm lucky, because I still have my job and insurance. (HDHP, which I'm sure will fuck me with behavioral health costs.) But I'm trying to figure out how and where to get help. I think a psychiatrist would be one need, because some of my siblings have ADHD, and I relate heavily to their descriptions and things I see online. Of course this would play into mood and such, but in general I'm feeling out of control. I don't want to assume I know anything, but I'm assuming getting help would help, ya know?

​

TL;DR: Any online Behavioral Health resources in the US (got this pandemic/shelter-in-place situation), and/or where to start, trying to be seen/diagnosed for the first time? Thanks.",5.133330745341618,6.9054009510869605,5.6324534161490725,78.08956521739131,69.38043478260869,8.9527950310559,29.990683229813666,9.424239791934726,2.825148757763976,781,31,139,17,14,251,114,184,0.085,0.778,0.136,0.8917,1,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,2,1,1,3,6,8,1,1,6,0,12,3,0,3,2,40,32,13,0,5,5,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,5,13,0,1,9,1,1,0,2,2,0,2,2,3,15,4,24,23,2,16,0,0,1,1,10,10,1,4,6,85,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512242090740679,0.0,0.11154144158456956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363376553849559,0.15289823541574113,0.08556928161481535,0.0,0.0962602431140037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354805438176404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15341061620570745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14112997923752238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12771564715243566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12023675364704665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12724770029088345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500710208253492,0.1070316425839113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163285778396381,0.13148283391952711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10063841231147123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675045835147889,0.0,0.0,0.4217087760392964,0.0,0.1262185854892695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486768610373647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383066705192656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330196854724218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526622921915547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061045393953213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10027088282306824,0.0,0.0,0.1421530253854912,0.0,0.0,0.14143912881326107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906371150711452,0.0,0.10048866607168996,0.0,0.0,0.13154570784144667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11859407130459144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158481254615762,0.0,0.0,0.08359641445799679,0.0806273171972082,0.0,0.0,0.07337297084287274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25629262831643523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027179988047585,0.1086774391511566,0.0,0.0,0.07421828568617149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160634533143833,0.0,0.0,0.2681598412894527,0.0,0.15289823541574113,0.08103093116443033
mentalhealth,sophillaaa,2020/04/06,Why do I perceive my good thoughts as a whole different person? I’ve been struggling with depression for about half of my life and only recently I’ve started treatment. Majority of the times my thoughts are not good. But when I have a happy or self soothing thought it doesn’t feel like me. It feels like someone else is saying the “Hey yknow what it’s alright!” if that makes sense.,2.6714864864864865,5.3145495945945935,3.006689189189192,89.98138513513516,80.08108108108108,5.8621621621621625,28.16891891891892,7.1686216300943375,1.5641675675675681,306,14,59,4,8,94,60,74,0.079,0.69,0.231,0.8908,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,1,4,1,6,1,0,1,0,13,13,6,0,1,4,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,0,2,5,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,4,3,6,6,6,9,2,4,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,6,35,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693609427413068,0.0,0.0,0.2054411233731783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16426283111057094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19884854769481589,0.2809513460474309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3298552540734329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093210025811268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13888871005679956,0.19213129603650686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312550060593752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14954934144656418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17169359599525155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19415277324453145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15637158766041526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051325904006292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666077108096448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917885859638296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055649956734996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4683173092293335,0.1146591149294398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743198468378815,0.2195353140960966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hupper12345,2020/04/06,"Pregnancy daughter Hi I just wondered if it is ok that my daughter told me about her pregnant at 3 months,  when you are told about such news is it not what you tell your mum straight away.  My daughter told her husband but waited for 3 months before she told me.  

I’m super happy but I wondered why she kept this from me, even though she’s currently living with me due to work commitments

I would like you get your advice if I’m over exaggerating ?",3.714221508828248,5.325444820224725,4.218009630818621,87.46707865168541,72.70786516853933,6.8834670947030485,26.19743178170145,7.447530270364453,1.2238622792937397,355,12,72,4,7,112,61,89,0.022000000000000002,0.7829999999999999,0.195,0.9468,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,5,0,2,7,4,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,14,15,6,0,3,6,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,19,4,9,9,0,9,0,0,0,0,21,4,0,4,6,47,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17589952759986394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16912131986803391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15317162824080352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11889209479855807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404557063875506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19161945936222086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794171301279094,0.0,0.15894836788650754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873577315340404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573329524262786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17685472740061384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6880128011483969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242718389186075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3904170969492502,0.13104632390413504,0.0,0.0,0.12787091437299858,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nikilll_r,2020/04/06,"I'm going insane and I feel that I'm going to lose control over my own mind and one day do something bad. Before any of that happens, I need to end myself. I'm going insane. I can't control my mind.",-0.5450000000000017,1.4164835909090918,2.5919999999999987,92.15300000000002,88.0909090909091,3.5200000000000005,17.89090909090909,3.1291,-0.6770490909090907,154,4,33,0,5,55,28,44,0.26,0.74,0.0,-0.8909999999999999,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,8,11,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,2,0,1,0,1,6,0,4,11,1,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,18,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15604435262172234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915940388568132,0.0,0.0,0.19525816938752086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5147299551904464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14798621110352592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203238250983193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160246097651939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3912314544369153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20291551089652954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567131072302834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4633893169263325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17014569954933384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15549170552689134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766536890770439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ComplexCelebration1,2020/04/06,"My long, rambling post about why we get suicidal thoughts. (CW: suicidal thoughts) **(I’m not a mental health professional.)**

After doing research and self-reflection over the years, I’ve developed my own understanding of why the fuck our brains give us fucked up suicidal thoughts. So basically, this is my interpretation.

**When do suicidal thoughts occur?**

First, there’s some kind of trigger (external or internal). For example, I may feel overwhelming loneliness. The feeling of loneliness is the trigger. Then, the brain (limbic system, specifically) reacts with “Fuck, this is so painful. I’ve activated fight or flight mode bc this feeling is so painful, we must be in DANGER.”

Then, the anxiety and depression kicks in. Something to note is how the limbic system doesn’t take any time to identify why the trigger caused distress and what actual emotion you are experiencing. The brain basically just detects a vague negative feeling, and then freaks the fuck out. It basically overreacts without even trying to understand the source of the problem. It’s lame.

**Why do we have suicidal thoughts?**

I’ve often wondered, why the hell would humans be evolved to have suicidal thoughts? It doesn’t make sense because our brains should be focused on helping us SURVIVE. Suicidal thoughts obviously don’t promote survival. The only logical answer to this question is that the limbic system is well-intentioned but dumb as fuck. The limbic system is overreacting and putting you in fight or flight mode. It’s actually trying to help you by doing this. It’s detecting danger and discomfort. The brain thinks “what is the easiest way to get rid of this pain?”. When the negative emotions are so strong, suicidal thoughts emerge because it’s the only solution that the limbic system can think of. I believe this is a normal response to deep emotional pain.

So, I think the brain ultimately wants you to survive, but it’s accustomed to overreacting to negative feelings/triggers. The brain wants you to survive but it also wants you to not experience pain. When you go into fight or flight mode, the focus is on ending the pain even if that means ending your life. It’s quite ironic because the part of the brain focused on survival is telling you to kill yourself. (My sense of humor might be terrible but I think this irony and the misguidedness of the brain is hilarious.)

**What is the point of understanding the brain’s reaction?**

I think understanding this can help you be more compassionate toward yourself. It’s not your fault you’re experiencing suicidal thoughts. I actually think it’s quite normal to have suicidal thoughts, but that doesn’t mean you have to cling to them or act on them. It’s just your brain’s normal reaction to emotional pain.

**We should be compassionate toward our silly, well-intentioned brains.**

Although I describe the brain’s overreaction as “dumb as fuck”, I shouldn’t be so derogatory. We should be compassionate toward our limbic systems. Even though the brain is sometimes horribly mistaken by suggesting suicide, the brain is ultimately trying to help. I’ve heard suggestions for thinking of the limbic system as a child that doesn’t know any better.

NOTE: I suppose this may all sound like a bummer. The bright side is that through neuroplasticity, we can consciously change the way our limbic system reacts to certain triggers. If you aren’t happy with how your brain reacts to some things, you do have the ability to change it. It takes time, effort and repetition but it is possible. 

**Suggestions for responding to suicidal thoughts:**

(IM NOT A MENTAL HEALTH SPECIALIST. THIS IS BASED ON MY EXPERIENCE AS A FELLOW DEPRESSED PERSON.)

When you’re in an overwhelming trance trickled with suicidal thoughts, the main thing to do is to SLOW DOWN and calm the nervous system. The key is to get out of fight or flight mode. I prefer taking deep breaths and/or listening to calming binaural beats. There are also “grounding techniques” that may help. Find what works for you.

**Look Inward to understand yourself more.**

\*\*\*\*DISCLAIMER: Please note that if you’re struggling A LOT, you may not have the energy to dig deeper into your feelings. That’s okay. If you are responding to **trauma**, investigating your emotions may not help. Trauma is complicated so I recommend seeking trauma-informed resources/counseling. Whether or not your experience is trauma-related, If the idea of looking inward is too overwhelming, you should just focus on calming your nervous system. (Then, perhaps distract yourself with positive activities/media until your mood improves.)

Anyway, If you have the mental energy, you can investigate what led to your suicidal thoughts by doing the following.

Think about what triggered all this in the first place. Identify the emotion. Write it down. Identify any external events that pushed you into a negative mood. I think it’s important to name the negative emotions you feel. We are so used to saying “I feel like shit” or “I’m depressed”, but that is so vague. I think our brains think that if we identify our actual emotions, the pain will get worse. That is not true. When we slow down, identify our emotions and allow ourselves to feel those emotions, it’s a bit easier.

For example, I may realize that the insanely uncomfortable feeling that led to my suicidal thoughts was related to vulnerability. I find that when I pinpoint the uncomfortable, triggering feeling as “vulnerability”, then I can do research or talk to my therapist about the specific challenges of vulnerability. If I don’t pinpoint the problem, then the problem is vague and it feels more overwhelming, mysterious and scary.

In my experience, I felt much more hopeless before I understood everything I wrote above. I think understanding yourself  and m human biology in general, can help mitigate the scariness of suicidal thoughts. It’s easy to think that your brain is against you but when you understand the response, it’s easy to see that the brain is trying to help in a terribly misguided way.

I hope this helps at least one person. I wish I knew this stuff when I was an extremely depressed teenager. I still struggle with suicidal thoughts especially during this quarantine. I don’t have everything figured out. All I can say is that understanding why suicidal thoughts generally occur can make the experience less scary.",5.164789915966388,8.431215661510464,5.4164962800406835,72.67810094738535,74.82347588717015,9.00803939410159,32.52919766632768,9.456829171716203,3.93418212278542,5128,256,782,146,119,1621,376,1099,0.24,0.642,0.11800000000000001,-0.9995,1,1,1,0,4,2,191.0,19,33,2,16,38,73,17,11,71,1,92,38,21,18,7,196,180,75,19,27,38,0,12,2,1,15,11,5,0,5,65,33,0,0,67,0,0,7,23,51,0,3,24,23,92,20,111,133,17,85,1,10,4,6,92,35,10,31,31,543,157,7,0.0,0.0,0.09446587872366556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038706709070467284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049372079597266125,0.0,0.018513529993431373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04425771147915332,0.0,0.02059308078985051,0.027265991033604903,0.0,0.021403622715588058,0.02642098314772401,0.0,0.0,0.5133053960875084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024860866845730252,0.05120243137303517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337638330980586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722261947867181,0.04286941473653185,0.0,0.0,0.04795315963369226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04350020008217679,0.11836503004787385,0.0,0.0,0.1346030533319156,0.017289041632252963,0.023236543404066463,0.0,0.04423814785800983,0.04117034117349325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342393834831723,0.05057563352520555,0.02321559279046149,0.013753860634908771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025762179673053203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051448593625678704,0.0,0.0,0.14599145065539235,0.0,0.0,0.02403683451147593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027319734203096756,0.026140994616538425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0267745767520261,0.025201387619134458,0.013300115448064729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017093726185718527,0.02364655676341267,0.0,0.0,0.021416928206645185,0.04064511913228151,0.0,0.0,0.02057463720990347,0.0,0.0,0.032308416330834,0.0,0.0,0.05272348691609708,0.0,0.0,0.07316608062526513,0.025673202516066827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.017790357429522455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0711348764726505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.016399074436224667,0.036811566511009496,0.2060106844280686,0.0,0.0,0.026207085731381342,0.0,0.0,0.04226237419274708,0.025284663589944568,0.026565188413320995,0.022877558907391186,0.02728274252908097,0.023177656942973357,0.0,0.0,0.06947063247072617,0.0,0.024328467587762668,0.027110411526124614,0.05148101562963084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03849086223927183,0.0,0.0,0.019284887888909315,0.0,0.025246690898356728,0.0,0.02484175226999813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018630942318059014,0.02393518962971864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019326773682825808,0.0,0.0,0.05059981834339438,0.027704102416598642,0.4764910447435503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054587922832926565,0.01945166976500584,0.021152547879992854,0.0,0.0,0.028098970147499118,0.032155844954152066,0.2015894692358454,0.023777142877284104,0.3266161649095953,0.028223338160447142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572296250158972,0.0,0.0,0.2015509186562644,0.05822111568725207,0.02090170317720244,0.0,0.0,0.04282274011560548,0.05762835668031279,0.0,0.0,0.043518814137988686,0.0,0.1310246352579524,0.0,0.02782970195441083,0.023328687725798214,0.026244712913070203,0.017618455626313412,0.0,0.024662661729537887,0.017191539324863957,0.0,0.0,0.015584508473884309
mentalhealth,loveableladyy,2020/04/06,"Quick Vent. Like a lot of people, I was getting everything in my life together. I went back to school, I had A+'s in all my classes, I found motivated friends, found someone I wanted to pursue in dating, I had hobbies. Everything was going great. Then, quarantine and university got canceled and I've been stuck inside for about a month with my brother who either explicitly or implicitly gets the point across that I'm mentally ill and need to go on psychiatric medication. I've been in therapy since I was 15. It's been 10 years. I'm actually quite mentally well now. I don't need medication. I'm not depressed. I treat people well, I work towards my future, I develop my hobbies, I look after my things and my cat. I am actually well, but I am constantly having to defend my mental health against my family because of my past and they now use that as a way to focus in on something so they don't have to deal with their own shit. 

I'm super fucking sick of it, because it's only after a very thorough discussion that they finally lay the fuck off and the amount of times I have to do that is so god damn annoying and quite frankly, very exhausting. I have my life relatively together and I journal almost everyday and I'm STILL in therapy to hopefully catch any slip ups before they happen.  

I do the work. I've done the work and if they could all fuck off and look at their own damn selves in the mirror because their reflection looks pretty fucking dirty to me, I would appreciate it. 

And also, just because you act out your emotions and don't acknowledge that they are there, when I attempt to talk through them before (so I hopefully do not) act them out, doesn't make me dramatic. Don't tell me to call my therapist up when you know I have regular scheduled appointments and you have never seen one once. Fuck out of here. 

That is all. Hope everyone will pull through in this quarantine. Let us try our best and see what happens.",3.6379459549071633,5.628316225464189,4.9675522214854135,80.43140790782496,73.74801061007958,8.744330238726791,28.75737732095491,9.354420925462401,2.7142944960212203,1535,64,292,38,32,510,201,377,0.122,0.757,0.121,-0.6698,0,2,1,0,0,0,41.0,2,4,11,9,18,23,9,0,10,0,32,14,1,3,6,51,67,26,0,9,7,1,0,1,1,2,8,0,0,0,14,20,0,0,6,0,0,7,8,11,3,1,15,5,54,12,46,48,9,50,0,1,5,5,25,21,8,7,22,204,68,6,0.0,0.0,0.16082317662349044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251280008079273,0.0,0.0,0.06589613089360223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056035574499634935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336136053969785,0.0,0.20092378599428246,0.0,0.14023453606040528,0.0,0.08647487201093636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414073736487931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904631691653309,0.0,0.0657905743041754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495191716167126,0.07097194775737352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843249356232252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926901480137447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873778345962887,0.14811359308767003,0.0,0.07768042474201378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026637867807187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18069710871263933,0.06366288641583613,0.38089245152906653,0.08610234883922588,0.0,0.09366088954142854,0.0,0.06590368814815477,0.0908475050222259,0.0,0.0,0.1457340433913418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758851737246245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455286586652124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04528549026837295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426070886673244,0.11640466939649392,0.04025701582710207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075885153902503,0.0,0.0,0.07005446958582318,0.0,0.0,0.05500337493496787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660208809342846,0.24912278732231266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577177286007292,0.0,0.0,0.12219874494275,0.06355280914562242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775448354313925,0.05583711875974999,0.06266975063139207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786611750157222,0.11425309667179614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789567506465077,0.0,0.0,0.08383154369511372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528742824866467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339431364310056,0.06566300918440086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458354629064696,0.06816304245797697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981818568180266,0.06343639349069304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658056258947742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623088388115841,0.07202219446223616,0.0,0.1884656811978855,0.09567402960784288,0.054743630212414816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04804874478709517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055944938793885735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911837901574423,0.07116809470712908,0.0,0.13597907653439534,0.04860230445223922,0.06540615871141094,0.0,0.0,0.2222654579765825,0.07638664639388455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799669492925954,0.0,0.0,0.0585353781201771,0.0,0.0,0.05306360757448583
mentalhealth,Miyapa,2020/04/06,"My friend can’t sleep for days at a time? My friend has been staying up for days on end and just recently came to me and said it was involuntary. He hasn’t had problems with insomnia before, so I think something is keeping him up. Does anyone have any ideas as to what it is? (Have any of you had a problem like this before, and if so, what kept you up?) I’ve offered my ears and been very gentle and caring towards him, but I’m not sure what else I can do.",2.6390868924889546,3.4618397422680403,3.9256259204712833,91.59886597938149,74.25773195876289,6.7799705449189975,24.166421207658324,6.868970318607317,0.6131513991163478,353,10,82,3,7,116,67,97,0.063,0.8270000000000001,0.11,0.5684,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,0,14,3,2,0,1,18,21,10,0,3,4,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,6,7,0,2,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,8,2,10,5,13,13,0,13,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,1,6,56,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26283229504085603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13512440045702692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3288818334233919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210257114817716,0.1970305358223801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492596165465191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16911376049259913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143498891166266,0.0,0.1711615160963091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2986078521548585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21815493186873064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717688528212538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441184422408512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3698269531922215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908103652176883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18382433335575468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19338885750589765,0.0,0.0,0.14877274873288127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20597803602079806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18213517369198007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382634528428862,0.0,0.0,0.1126852180868322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15945090722369673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Positive_Progress,2020/04/06,"How can I be diagnosed??? Hi there, 

So i've always struggled with anxiety but I could cope so ignored it. This developed into a mega panic attack which made me feel like I was going crazy. Since then, I get spurts of existential intrusive thoughts, derealisation episodes lasting days, anxiety, and occasional attacks. Its really worrying and  I haven't felt the same in a while - it preoccupies a lot of my time and thoughts. 

From what i've googled I have Generalised Anxiety Disorder and i'm convinced perhaps Existential OCD. I've been to see the campus Nurse and tried to make it clear how distressing everything was and she agreed it was anxiety and prescribed SSRI's. But that was that. 

What I wanted to ask is how can I be properly diagnosed? It didn't feel like a diagnosis- I don't know what I was expecting. This might sound silly but I feel like I need some sort of validation from a professional. She didn't tell me whether she thought I had some form of mild OCD, she didn't tell me I had an anxiety *disorder*, she just followed my lead, agreed I have excessive anxiety and then prescribed some pills and that was that.. 

It doesn't feel like its enough. It seems so wishy washy, and so I have constant doubts that there's anything wrong with me and that i'm just 'self diagnosing' and because nobody has affirmed that anythings wrong with me this constituently fuels inaction until I have big attacks again which knock me back into believing something is wrong. 

Is it strange that I haven't been diagnosed as having a disorder? Or does nobody actually get 'diagnosed'.. I'm not asking for a certificate I just want to hear the words. Can I ask for this? A diagnosis? I Guess I don't really understand how doctors and stuff work, this is all so new to me.",3.8700668410345855,6.323833774774776,4.864219703574545,79.32112467306018,74.61561561561561,9.101578998353192,29.36055410248959,9.618343705623,3.107057618909232,1409,62,260,40,31,459,162,333,0.204,0.7170000000000001,0.079,-0.9925,1,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,2,16,17,3,4,12,0,35,7,0,8,2,64,64,32,0,5,9,0,5,4,0,1,7,2,0,1,29,18,0,1,11,0,0,3,9,11,0,0,18,8,36,6,21,42,8,18,0,0,1,0,13,4,0,10,15,179,65,6,0.0,0.0,0.07947649650450203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776699521282663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738214530001288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13404109142782808,0.0,0.2284142789301015,0.2779590790978582,0.0,0.06262454274539245,0.0,0.049646819912750835,0.0,0.0,0.09175822933540156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801081341309501,0.0,0.06502550762265241,0.0,0.0,0.05252391596809518,0.0,0.0,0.41331401248758576,0.0,0.0,0.2800217675925333,0.08336023231346802,0.07127120765271751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415225963649646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07319560345994336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647198562107894,0.23273122112104344,0.07819793074840042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510108020774686,0.0,0.04628586200405035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971850738671618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179203780434417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04475887349800427,0.06638681214204294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591554971037442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923981883776796,0.0,0.0770632163488268,0.054363750642595784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08639801873843761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06038885892693183,0.0,0.07865803497069622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555566449852633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434878077680663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489942593456845,0.07414253348184187,0.08496267935232024,0.0,0.0,0.06737038677367288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626987031517803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514177478750869,0.0932326054072503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14236932279544087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19396963350135324,0.04748999463003392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055294365225806566,0.0,0.0,0.08478490381125732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607423410003522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059291382070154025,0.08270919162458645,0.0,0.0,0.2671349919882831,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brofistnugget,2020/04/06,"My boyfriend needs therapy, but how? Me (F23) and my boyfriend (24) have been together for a few months. I love him very much, but the problem is, I'm that person who always helps others and gets their own mental health wrecked in the process.

He has some serious trauma because of his past, and sometimes it affects our relationship, especially when we're having an argument. I would like to talk about things calmly, but he tends to overreact and he just starts to panic. He gets very melancholic. He is scared of losing me. This is very draining for me, since I have my own mental health issues that I'm dealing with.

We live in different countries, so the healthcare in his country is very different from what I'm used to. He lives in the UK. He's said that it's too expensive to go to therapy and that the psychologists and are shit. He'd need proper therapy, not just a nurse to talk with.

I'm scared that his trauma is going to come between us. I want this relationship to work. He is very loving and caring, and I really want to be with him. What are his options? Therapy would be really good for him.

**TL;DR:** My boyfriend has trauma from his past and it's affecting our relationship. What are his options, and how can he get help? He says that therapy is too expensive.",2.7320731707317094,5.213701101626018,3.7890634146341466,85.42300975609757,78.63414634146342,7.350634146341464,24.880650406504067,8.364918446050245,1.7940691382113827,1005,37,194,21,25,324,124,246,0.155,0.718,0.127,-0.7967,2,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,4,0,1,2,9,17,1,3,8,0,22,5,1,5,0,36,43,17,0,7,6,0,0,1,0,2,2,2,0,1,17,15,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,11,0,0,2,2,27,6,26,36,5,12,0,2,0,2,39,4,1,3,6,126,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539739584400673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05523693239757641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923861407891255,0.0,0.0,0.07805520132947505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341817410184136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18934290184494856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420248856620749,0.0,0.10299507742789556,0.07600200725345695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19263507260586188,0.0,0.0,0.12147216264257825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945765817676976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04426900579771234,0.0,0.16002613500333512,0.0,0.0,0.10137293176232366,0.0,0.0,0.16356380300132892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263347625631507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232654816177876,0.0,0.06661108795420613,0.13437699832439834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631500243895756,0.0,0.0,0.1730010007588058,0.0,0.07911990345497552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670454257920407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609820245621895,0.0,0.0,0.2918538214232188,0.0,0.0,0.08619385148087723,0.07205921017074783,0.18143913228120565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930130916114968,0.0749561302487411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961871777685734,0.0,0.06413645070037476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14566282782186418,0.0,0.0,0.5181201439180043,0.0,0.06019934745460406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089964570188981,0.0782606641965998,0.0,0.3738266736736189,0.10689196173005262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06596744905159238,0.0,0.0,0.1287379573539513,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Levhac,2020/04/06,"Mental health in students and developing proper care method. Hi :)

Without giving too much information I work for a state official and have been developing a series of laws that can aid mental health in students, teaching them how to manage any issues they have, along with encouraging them to seek help, a big issue so far has been the stigma sadly. I am reaching out to this community to see if I can get first hand experiences and suggestions on would have assisted you. I am primarily focusing on high school years, but any suggestion that would help is welcome. I am in NY, but laws are a method of states copying from each other to be the best. If you don't want to publicly comment please PM, I am all ears!

Of course passing the law is always a challenge, but there is victory in putting the law into suggestion which is a great method to raise awareness and to garner support.",9.007045454545455,7.887660939393939,8.687689393939397,69.51153409090912,60.81818181818182,11.643939393939394,37.59469696969697,10.686352973137794,3.9588333333333328,705,28,124,14,8,227,108,165,0.026000000000000002,0.758,0.215,0.9874,0,0,3,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,3,4,4,8,0,0,10,0,21,4,2,1,1,25,27,11,0,5,6,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,5,9,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,2,3,11,7,24,22,4,17,0,1,1,0,17,11,0,2,2,89,16,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14152304235864285,0.0,0.0,0.23132513533816035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17849207088445454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734113966389763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663742351050126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446728822478634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888615744374013,0.1631595282601737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18751758665861026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615814742005667,0.0,0.0,0.2280066814857779,0.1797024864664237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3550458324936818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34280819525656364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250308941916559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867005356607103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17098082873607193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721335157369441,0.13553447628516194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930086655562874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031961620411296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16395436113240325,0.0,0.12382276578538125,0.0,0.0,0.24164478345463514,0.0,0.0,0.10952815522377607
mentalhealth,ta4619,2020/04/06,"Confused by my own thoughts I have been pretty sad lately, but I’m definitely not feeling suicidal. I don’t want to take my own life and have no plan to. But yet I keep thinking things like “I could jump off that bridge” or “I could drive in front of that train” and today I thought “today would be a good day to die.” I don’t know why I keep having these thoughts.",2.3799122807017525,3.680699973684217,3.1684210526315795,94.90728070175442,75.57894736842105,6.119298245614036,23.19298245614036,6.42735559955562,0.27760350877193,282,8,66,2,6,89,54,76,0.157,0.62,0.223,0.7704,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,1,1,0,10,1,0,0,0,19,21,5,2,4,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,6,0,0,3,4,2,0,0,4,1,10,2,7,13,2,10,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,6,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190094725564255,0.0,0.0,0.12883887678981404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20733576051470315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101265712970138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16756247942674246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35513985573086243,0.0,0.0,0.1097915660241922,0.0,0.2253558264616222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14110756966337915,0.0976003745333202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20324382953495448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21852232203539104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15020655415205028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327221777936214,0.12800827879343238,0.0,0.4757990574584447,0.0,0.0,0.3787282361703011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783295458595534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18026660431247574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14191501060375694,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashleyycarter,2020/04/06,"I’m disconnected with everyone People around me tell me I’m friendly, I can make friends easily, I think? I’m easy going, a happy person. Until I felt myself drifting away from who I think I am. I couldn’t feel any connection with everyone. I’m afraid to meet my friends because I might not be able to form any topic to talk about since they knew that I’m kind of a conversation starter. I’m scared of dead air that’s why sometimes when they invite me somewhere, I decline and make excuses. Since own country is on lockdown, my only communication with them is messenger. I still talk to them and pretend everything is fine and push myself to tell them something but I couldn’t feel anything. I feel like I’m just fooling myself. Same goes with my family. I get annoyed easily and cry when things doesn’t go on how I want it to be. Or because of the smallest things. Even before all these, I question myself who I really am. If I’m just making things up and if I’m just pretending to be someone that I’m not I don’t really know.",2.0655279503105604,4.376130956521742,3.759599723947552,85.66478260869567,80.01449275362319,6.8414078674948255,24.349896480331264,7.957251820313856,1.5116650103519669,816,30,161,15,21,272,114,207,0.086,0.7909999999999999,0.12300000000000001,0.34,0,1,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,5,0,11,11,1,2,3,0,14,0,0,4,1,38,39,13,1,5,9,0,4,1,3,1,0,0,0,1,10,10,0,0,9,2,0,4,6,4,0,0,2,4,31,7,22,31,4,15,0,0,0,0,19,6,0,5,6,103,41,0,0.1327225356369062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18051175096554392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921933813624156,0.11815119552844475,0.0,0.0,0.1246971911895815,0.0,0.0,0.1618128516764401,0.0,0.11293710235035327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14578947322699284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766198305213119,0.0,0.0,0.2536441410007503,0.1192824570319502,0.0,0.12511899459529427,0.0,0.20132550565204094,0.09481700597822236,0.12743444788440178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3076233054017673,0.0,0.06934204694963908,0.0,0.1508585511889756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14128560715100855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382100969717885,0.07294083459187482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484152683796568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26577996943504284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14079763634236847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094146905837724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201309488491033,0.1158881987712984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867961489254947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700509097675176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287841180608762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195789059913769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11245537374424323,0.10217629216970762,0.13126598145134896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599238840432178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21335469340929866,0.2320106922584304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2645248656436358,0.17008648347005026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828319024097191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976144474246725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rummiena,2020/04/06,"Not sure who to talk to about this Hi everyone, I am here for some guidance. I think I may suffer from some form of depression due to certain feelings I have been experiencing over the years, which have gotten stronger in the past months. 

For some back story, I lost my mother to cancer back in 2011, and wasn't allowed to see her during the 6 months leading to her death. I admit I feel betrayed and angry because of the decision my parents made to hide her from us so we don't remember her in a bad light, but I wanted to be there and I remember her in bad state when  she was still at home anyway. Following this ordeal I was told to keep living life normally, I graduated, got in a serious relationship, travelled, got a job, etc... Not once being allowed to fully express my feelings of sorrow or seeing a therapist in these 9 years. Over these 9 years I have become more shut off from people and have a problem trusting people with being my true self, so I just show my happy normal self instead. 

Things got to a head around a year ago, I left a job that my family was happy that I got (I hated it) without telling anyone, I left at the time everyday until I had a few interviews and got my current job with an airline. I didn't care what my family thought about it and I was happy I made this decision without consulting them. I also ended my relationship of almost 6 years because I was starting to feel like I would be stuck here taking care of someone and I couldn't bear the thought of feeling trapped. 

Now I am at home (due to the circumstances) on forced leave, and I feel like I am a burden on my family. I feel very low and upset sometimes at home as being here brings back some terrible memories and I have found that trying to talk to my friends about this only brings short answers from them. So what on earth can I do? I just stay in bed and out of the way, let them have the space for themselves to be comfortable, as when I am in a common space (such as the living room) they don't come to hang out there anymore. 

I am at a loss, I don't feel comfortable at home, it's not a good time to move out, I feel lonely and like a huge burden. I feel deeply unhappy and at this rate I just want to hide somewhere alone and never come back. I'm not sure what I can do at this point, if I show that I am sad or upset to anyone it's generally brushed off. I can't cry anymore and I don't want to feel like life is not what I dreamed it would be like when I was younger.",5.901328676417087,4.98240842632613,6.622340100414758,81.16088117587134,66.89783889980353,9.6625482063596,31.032598413737887,8.841846274778883,2.2493086080186275,1935,62,410,27,27,641,223,509,0.19399999999999998,0.685,0.121,-0.9893,7,4,0,0,0,0,46.0,2,0,4,3,28,37,1,2,25,0,44,4,1,5,5,86,88,30,1,10,14,2,11,5,1,3,3,0,6,2,24,24,0,1,21,4,0,9,16,18,0,0,24,16,68,19,73,52,8,78,0,8,2,0,29,37,0,9,34,291,92,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580577655894157,0.0,0.06558423343163447,0.06783353489672546,0.0,0.05237668854451544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299077765844745,0.09159188444319204,0.0,0.0,0.05830483727947356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014478362684392,0.1093719317654711,0.0798508381106571,0.07233457997218083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355395478378365,0.0,0.0,0.11283706343779745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194367755266233,0.0,0.0,0.05641113602083244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058009529553473924,0.0,0.07304474086509415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06258371022737659,0.0,0.0,0.185229846921702,0.0,0.3642811476776077,0.14036988995738595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181238151309452,0.0506016230153332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05493447693292843,0.26191347665344555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20916337658778872,0.0,0.06466319835007754,0.06721722821883136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627891103167299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19498238716971253,0.0582153662304216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935022586892889,0.1423219984131531,0.06697353615463053,0.09252274801917676,0.15998884540825656,0.0,0.11566736642480648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714960217040394,0.0,0.0,0.1239467588008852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045556883354775,0.06961129933031457,0.0,0.0,0.05051412951883151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12834327206264914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975051783154172,0.0,0.0498122418641359,0.0,0.0,0.07272494753068989,0.0,0.06252281899519092,0.09081259822807107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191437124606819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06267030130419023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406352068859916,0.14838715693663174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10438278952978494,0.0,0.13665207895153347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554940831367379,0.0,0.06477667580611778,0.0,0.046358017358803134,0.06980943637582478,0.0523047518151346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345737502192945,0.0,0.04924442818267079,0.1052855252661943,0.057245911049495536,0.0,0.0,0.07604526673439722,0.04351226742069856,0.04196684044458813,0.0,0.10399214444698056,0.07638184841935629,0.0,0.0,0.06258371022737659,0.0,0.04446711203091019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878296337499999,0.0,0.0,0.05404060635754513,0.11589274187968147,0.051987240483846335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12627055520963126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305217854402503,0.0,0.0,0.21088461562825025
mentalhealth,HauntingPayment,2020/04/06,"I've been listening to the same song on repeat for three days now. My friends are starting to worry about me so I'm getting a little worried about why I'm doing this. It's been kind of obsessive, I dislike going long stretches without listening to it but I can function fine without it.

Any ideas?

Here's the song, if that matters: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6fJHsl8ElGM](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6fJHsl8ElGM)",7.502574626865673,11.557543940298512,4.759832089552241,75.85377798507467,72.28358208955223,5.738059701492538,29.270522388059703,7.1686216300943375,1.9991805970149261,352,14,49,4,8,97,51,67,0.113,0.8029999999999999,0.083,-0.2359,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,3,0,5,0,0,0,0,7,12,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,0,1,2,4,4,3,10,10,1,9,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,5,34,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342864345290274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16447277591413875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19703497515612373,0.0,0.13324226342493234,0.0,0.1449390067185618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878969944745429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655737313620844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556063190662544,0.0,0.2256928715240317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18051102423752524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23012424164685494,0.0,0.0,0.4916782155612013,0.0,0.0,0.5179891898529937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Utopiarage,2020/04/06,"Just broke up with my girlfriend After 20 months I finally gave up. This quarentine broke me and I’m sinking more and more into depression. It got to the point where the relationship was a chore. I couldn’t take it. 

Idk if this is a good thing or a bad thing but i feel like a weight is off my chest",0.6390476190476164,2.8444979841269853,2.1549206349206362,95.64285714285715,85.03174603174601,6.139682539682537,18.52380952380953,7.447530270364453,0.23884761904761875,235,6,55,4,7,76,47,63,0.157,0.759,0.084,-0.3693,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,6,0,4,2,1,0,0,10,9,5,0,2,4,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,6,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,2,6,2,7,5,2,9,0,3,0,0,3,6,0,2,4,38,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463876398925113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25416039459981954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14920625892155293,0.21081219736665274,0.0,0.32325642946063776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24750730652280414,0.2360102535523021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14416596065541162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23553784659811725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789552229809571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168159888108864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2218707897342818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3920890745222197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3593398536624475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway34641,2020/04/06,"Is it normal to hear voices sometimes? (Cross-posting this a few different places)

Pretty much what the title says. To clarify, this doesn't happen super often, but it's been happening for a while now where suddenly I'll just start hearing people talking even though nobody is. It typically happens when one or more of the following is true:

1. It's really late at night
2. My eyes are closed
3. I'm really tired

When it's really late at night, I figure it might just be paranoia because I worry that somebody else will still be awake without my knowing or that I'll have woken them up. If I'm really tired, I figure maybe it's just exhaustion or I'm half asleep and my dreams are bleeding into reality? But there have been times where I was very well-rested, it was the middle of the day, and I closed my eyes and I could hear people talking -- even though nobody was. It differs in what it sounds like; sometimes it'll be several people speaking softly and indistinctly (as if they were far away but without sounding far away, if that makes sense) so I can't tell what they're saying, sometimes it's just one person and sounds very loud and distinct, sometimes it sounds like people I know, sometimes it sounds like people I've never met, etc. But it always comes and goes very quickly -- almost as soon as I notice it, it disappears.

Could it be stress or something? I'm not super-worried; like I said, it's fairly rare and I'm not in my 20s so chances are it's not schizophrenia. They never tell me to do things -- in fact, most of the time I can't even tell what they're saying, or if I can it's usually just a word or phrase, *maybe* a sentence and I forget it almost immediately (probably be my ADHD). Any suggestions or advice would be greatly appreciated. Thanks in advance.

(Using a throwaway because privacy)",3.4104322397879936,5.503390065155809,4.528588138536055,82.87653020195559,74.69405099150141,6.934442109110848,24.98483048524171,7.831003766801068,1.4888659234213648,1435,48,265,21,31,469,177,353,0.08199999999999999,0.816,0.102,0.7989,1,0,1,0,0,0,54.0,0,0,3,2,22,10,0,1,10,0,31,7,3,2,5,60,53,34,0,8,25,0,1,4,0,4,4,15,0,1,32,13,0,0,4,1,0,4,10,2,0,3,9,18,23,8,22,32,5,41,0,0,2,0,19,18,0,16,23,177,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220482076450263,0.07497175784787816,0.0,0.0,0.15365181126951366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383877121767126,0.0,0.0,0.05217352646477997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144165510994466,0.0,0.0,0.09353792264630728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608912793660787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225123968208564,0.0,0.0,0.04947928183052693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603161230870347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409130708244841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556520485471096,0.1520222844749362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458617137167415,0.0,0.0,0.2035347822590924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594134895279918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432870532996442,0.0,0.1730913017479437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14992979009518742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051212467498489865,0.0,0.1541549318633206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138981719023061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056399428081928375,0.0,0.11834532614247915,0.0,0.0,0.14399662155384618,0.07517117752561092,0.0,0.08734839761731301,0.0,0.0,0.10397749712900177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659465444995061,0.0669906083477539,0.08015806154351733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734783773199279,0.07805375964493537,0.08271919015293665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966000682760871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07298010101624812,0.18303701529959898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667391489137335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059064270941639616,0.3793996302481457,0.0,0.05430415940950746,0.0,0.061270212624924186,0.0,0.0878846832283215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333232250458677,0.20117498048591376,0.07063522242563984,0.0,0.0,0.05097062473561613,0.0,0.15075776470637411,0.0,0.08947431984534397,0.17636108763464042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662630927907156,0.08449833942519437,0.18991082035582155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898220673501626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14791435763438054,0.0,0.0,0.15582963786835044,0.0,0.054501040218635735,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,havesexwithme666,2020/04/06,"Do sexual side effects of SSRIs ever go away , are there any alternatives? I reallt don't want sexual side effects honestly.",5.47909090909091,8.236038727272728,8.009090909090908,57.23363636363638,70.81818181818181,11.672727272727276,29.181818181818183,11.20814326018867,4.908290909090909,100,4,13,4,2,36,18,22,0.055,0.81,0.135,0.4172,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,4,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,8,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40393321955062494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5580726754541534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5372974970302046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3375779136402997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35035038884272635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway111221211,2020/04/06,"What's wrong with me? Hello, sorry if I make any grammar/spelling mistakes, English isn't my first language. Also, I apologize if this doesn't fit in this sub.

I'm 16 years old, I live with my parents and I have a pretty good life, I don't have any kind of issues with my family nor my school. However, I've been feeling really weird lately, and I don't understand why. 

It all started about 2 months ago, I was just sad but I didn't worry about it. 1 week later, I started having mental breakdowns every single night, with no reason at all. Another day my mom asked me if everything was okay, and I instantly cried. I still don't know why. I tried really hard to stop but I couldn't. And this happened two times. 

But now that we're all in quarantine, it's just getting worse, and I try to understand what's going on in my mind but I can't. At first I was just bored like pretty much everyone here, but I still did my homework (even though I procastinated a lot) and talked to my family. But then it got worse. As I'm writting this, I just stay on my bed all the gosh darn day, I don't do any of my homework and I don't want to eat anything. And I know that I can get out of bed and get my life together, but I just don't want. I'm too lazy. I can't. I also feel really down and I don't talk to anyone, I blocked all of my friends and I deleted their phone numbers. When I feel like I'm starting to feel better, I feel guilty and I do everything to feel bad again (for example, I think about all the productive things that I could have done when I was in my bed so I feel like sh*t, or I think about cringy stuff that I did in the past and tell myself how stupid I am and that I don't deserve feeling okay). I've read some articles about depression and even though I have a lot of the symptoms, I don't think that I have it, because I *know* that I can feel better, but I don't. By the way, I hear my parents argue more often, and I know that it is because of me, so it makes me feel even worse. I feel like this might just be a lack of motivation. Does anybody know what's wrong with me, please? Why do I act like this and make myself feel miserable?

My parents want me to see a doctor, too, but only because I don't eat a lot. Should I go see a doctor?",1.7230763911054368,2.9946260145228263,3.5270954356846467,91.78773646132572,77.23651452282158,6.852303436535803,22.317480583040748,7.5161900641278425,0.6587649111607621,1737,48,405,23,39,584,199,482,0.16699999999999998,0.7240000000000001,0.109,-0.9796,4,1,0,0,0,0,65.0,0,0,1,5,31,23,2,1,12,2,42,7,0,6,6,93,88,42,0,11,19,4,13,5,1,2,5,1,5,0,26,23,2,2,24,1,0,3,19,11,0,3,10,16,76,12,39,73,14,42,0,3,2,0,15,12,1,10,30,271,102,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05958853016414211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075153290364217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714044698164746,0.07048846308770809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047003408704457315,0.0,0.05531824113361253,0.0,0.06284379427045039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056127828800781605,0.12293430586974832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890535744841607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05367155209180365,0.0,0.07384056131756618,0.08670566966754725,0.0,0.05789848517669637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13760978466974874,0.05882670468913057,0.06879177181240516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13757042958410132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319912387711128,0.0,0.056637703349118676,0.06423380691295205,0.12083017226989877,0.0,0.12674244014890215,0.0,0.4078754937743232,0.14407091518154969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435854104133035,0.0,0.0,0.051935797197703984,0.0,0.10536266212509428,0.0,0.0764079864806472,0.05638289215122583,0.05376382968070833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05944447501905426,0.0,0.06021799435172567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576443950608115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016263652164444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07000170118086804,0.18471814356753471,0.0,0.07582970425423373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496222435083077,0.1642071485829655,0.0,0.059358539578967175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714500361216892,0.0,0.0,0.13461426051998054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0677442870727266,0.07131225780286392,0.06787537964056918,0.07872996800150173,0.05365621398756578,0.0,0.0494161394405408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308359296955078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053851617382269,0.0,0.0,0.05112560303915199,0.0,0.0,0.2239272913256003,0.0,0.06417131020835118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378992019117328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13677853133083406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724051069028272,0.0,0.12919301735433636,0.06911574017998276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803257603683542,0.10713497047924346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524988296905466,0.14274091093707894,0.07165004824059161,0.10736766217652444,0.056200869014522405,0.0,0.0,0.07695347288648659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986972879802089,0.0,0.10806150795641233,0.05875527007826401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044659522001673516,0.12922004381350047,0.13209117496107242,0.0,0.039197875015702516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912790845347049,0.0,0.06566643824529048,0.13996161038562122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894839691456405,0.05335794817923452,0.053921689815608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819730624216799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826752837533462,0.2055158592225846,0.0,0.14699410700228074,0.0,0.043288969707812604
mentalhealth,Sam_Wick,2020/04/06,"School feels impossible My college switched to online school and I hate it. I thought focusing in class was hard enough, doing school work and home and learning at home feels actually impossible. My depression is at an all time high. I really want to drop this semester to focus on mental health.",4.226100628930819,7.364492396226421,4.775754716981132,76.55595911949688,77.86792452830191,8.816352201257864,27.701257861635213,9.2995712137729,3.1368389937106915,239,10,40,7,6,76,40,53,0.193,0.779,0.027999999999999997,-0.8615,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,9,8,3,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,5,0,7,6,2,7,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,23,7,7,0.0,0.0,0.1978608429285784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746336529644925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095013967441129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20503929482532512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18162976623211666,0.2001798108811592,0.0,0.2155204024946305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142231003297835,0.4067620821973152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20433060179175705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12989083962639733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6156004205104353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609658069789692,0.11822879444163603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959088396450478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760895800353424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sweatygun,2020/04/06,"Zoloft taper ranting Taking a look at this subreddit it feels like I might actually be heard. Really just venting so it's a little all over the place. 

Withdrawal from these psych meds is no joke. It's caused more problems than what I went on them for, and sunk me into the deepest hole of my life. 5 years after seeing a psychiatrist it's prob one of my biggest regrets...don't really think I needed one.

Really struggling with Zoloft taper right now, I've cultivated and fortified many organic coping mechanisms I wish I took seriously before going on meds (like working out, cardio, meditation, yoga)- These reasons + the numbness the meds caused, I decided to begin a taper. However that was now a whole year ago which blows my mind. Each dose drop has been a mini-withdrawal of it's own, stabilizing after about 4 weeks or so. I'm finally down to 25mg but I think the organic depression, and the anxiety that was there previously is dragging me down again. 

Getting off klonopin knocked me into social isolation for 6 months (before it was cool); that was a hell in it's own. 

My career prospects are probably what's depressing me the most nowadays, I am at an IT job that I'm not  a huge fan of. I don't want to go into IT. I studied marketing and information systems and then got my MBA. Financially illiterate parents (and by chain rule I was financially illiterate at the time) decided to go to a super expensive private catholic university...so now I have 100k worth of debt to pay off and an immensely deteriorated psyche. 

Started a business out of school with the help of the meds (Zoloft, dexedrine and klonopin), I did have a lot of social progress mostly induced by the meds, networked, got out of my comfort zone, made a little money but emphasis on a little- it all went back into the business. 2 years into the business a psych took me off the klonopin and adhd med and the business fell apart, I couldn't even leave the house, answer emails phone or text. This alone was enough to cause a deep depression. 

Now a year and a half off klonopin I'm struggling getting off this last med and anxiety is back through the roof. 

I'm trying to get a new job in NYC (where I live outside of) and I'm too hesitant to reach out to alumni network or people I know who can help in this situation. I don't know how stable I'm going to be from one day to the next to be honest still. The meds alone have caused a lot of cognitive dysfunction and I'm often more confused than thinking clearly. I really want to move into a field that I know I want to grow in (which isn't IT), something I can be somewhat proud of, and know that I'll be able to pay off my loans eventually. 

However with all this aspiration, my motivation seems to have gone out the window to learn, it feels almost like I can't even learn if I try. Brain is still full of sludge, and despite being on amphetimine most days I still can't seem to break the habit of procrastination...I apply and apply to jobs but haven't gotten one positive response yet. Know I need to change but can't seem to push myself to make changes, or else I'll just fall back into old patterns and hate myself more. 

Anyway thanks for reading my ted talk. TL:DR Feel stuck af in a shitty position because of my mental health issues, the meds' withdrawal.",5.2124698401162775,6.180880717187502,6.0709011627906975,78.04677325581395,68.390625,9.203488372093023,30.50872093023256,9.411308987883313,2.688276889534884,2609,100,494,52,43,860,312,640,0.138,0.775,0.087,-0.9845,7,3,1,0,0,0,77.0,0,0,1,5,26,21,2,3,45,1,36,9,1,10,4,99,89,31,0,9,12,1,3,3,0,1,8,1,1,0,30,34,0,0,23,3,7,14,10,11,0,5,19,7,43,10,87,62,18,93,1,3,2,0,12,44,1,18,35,318,73,16,0.05779366679218375,0.0,0.05639828195250963,0.0,0.06945675647264464,0.0,0.051230598540956,0.0,0.05787200901450033,0.11971361827750444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842399381559649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13331928711911326,0.0,0.035230482855093934,0.0,0.09835630747090836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06451684565324878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23748006317511344,0.12227607259877335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454426786039202,0.0,0.14933280156665502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04827919268352278,0.0,0.0,0.059716307017271174,0.0,0.0763443437023688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766664330655329,0.04128780710405672,0.0,0.06331013703872218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905844166598568,0.0,0.1313818907742876,0.0,0.09244574977129263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05705928089748882,0.0,0.061431965246393376,0.0,0.0,0.07747575322517915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668613195194363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06032157286501401,0.17205388974648833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588094391701176,0.04710955205358277,0.0,0.06119514838620356,0.0,0.0,0.04082137601710088,0.08470519897137453,0.17377331120042588,0.05103286660655787,0.0,0.04853212439851018,0.0,0.0,0.09826821757126453,0.0,0.054685764911166994,0.03857772135896008,0.05859370705258333,0.0,0.0,0.5777616164091038,0.0,0.0582424229110216,0.06130994740907578,0.05835512833765901,0.0,0.04613035344977761,0.06142552152499324,0.0,0.08570654325102271,0.0,0.05581748352302364,0.0614642202883421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060644731357217374,0.0,0.1566499373209457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417302755337333,0.0,0.0,0.04006685165241358,0.0,0.060382081042890015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0623113476977637,0.0553007339149311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780930657919894,0.0,0.1480964113539552,0.05942151498397673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04935547566129448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05849027625030289,0.0460540698621066,0.15783955100784178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496250293413043,0.0,0.11782673033310792,0.0,0.044492388239716935,0.0,0.0,0.04090665481787816,0.0,0.13846229086608233,0.0,0.0,0.12083697776312988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04345364491714565,0.04645236018236819,0.0,0.053208643558228366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11109554422333846,0.0,0.0,0.03369995187087925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842178062179369,0.07847621215193933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226460616891188,0.0,0.04635859344044855,0.0,0.0,0.10715061625265024,0.0,0.06452456504264559,0.06645986460658278,0.0,0.0,0.04207447774395919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886890629747965
mentalhealth,Vulnaak135,2020/04/06,"What to do? Ever since COVID-19 forced us to be quarantined, my mental health has been degrading. I just feel so useless and I'm crying a lot more and I just don't feel happy unless I'm with my girlfriend or my best friend. It's like outside of people, I am nothing.  I just don't feel really any happiness outside of people or my sport. I went to tell my mom that my mental health was feeling worse and she said ""No, you are fine. You have us so you are fine"" Completely blew me off. That hurt really fucking bad. My own mother just blew me off like it was nothing. I've just been lost on what to do at this point. I honestly don't know anymore.",0.437574626865672,2.7377674402985086,2.2941604477611968,93.53138992537315,87.28358208955223,5.4395522388059705,19.56902985074627,6.9077264865688965,0.32806119402985034,503,15,109,7,16,166,79,134,0.18899999999999997,0.655,0.157,-0.7909999999999999,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,2,3,0,2,8,15,1,0,1,0,15,3,0,0,1,19,26,8,0,0,8,2,4,2,2,0,2,1,0,0,7,4,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,6,0,0,7,5,21,9,12,18,4,7,0,3,0,1,12,5,1,3,3,74,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972536263159484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14183029545353032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940973669527047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15008313849491914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994622792551354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709287483143772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293632894437416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28924632905906583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049135519652308,0.1322130538621128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30447962679856483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040318945303189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530981889087747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859610947905163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973768659656416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15611539429961746,0.12158439112471317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882465847975381,0.0,0.0,0.1674948942431829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744493287079741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19829417416307887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519334711943465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832353577510198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603794785705392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830168815007695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499951413419555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3440536437759742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13257432319120302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457422883965738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,documax1,2020/04/06,"Isolating Alone Hi, I am currently trying to make a short documentary for my university project about people who are isolating alone. If you would like to take part, please send me a voice recording of how you are finding it. This could be how it is making you feel, what or who you miss, is it affecting your mental health or anything else you may want to include or get off our chest. It will be completely anonymous. Thank you for reading.

My email is [mf431@sussex.ac.uk](mailto:mf431@sussex.ac.uk)",6.710147783251232,9.19033042528736,5.533004926108372,77.5303448275862,66.58620689655173,8.649589490968804,29.66995073891625,9.23628265651192,2.6251261083743844,405,15,69,8,7,120,64,87,0.061,0.8420000000000001,0.09699999999999999,0.507,1,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,7,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,12,2,1,5,0,15,20,6,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,8,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,12,2,8,14,1,4,0,1,0,0,13,2,0,5,2,49,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4688613767830858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18626704339589653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23732402483501625,0.0,0.0,0.1807223280737062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18908666430163348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444953289380305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20688010993875794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825871030473525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405998266391645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058334265235607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30218121897523753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281079043985069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24511536037560225,0.0,0.15692282548479586,0.0,0.0,0.24846470142156216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264115934644001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17018728591820292,0.0,0.0,0.20839298180463853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536770227301446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13350729497733355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16079278711938094,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,okaysonowwhat1,2020/04/06,"Does this sound like a mental health problem and can anyone relate? So sometimes when I read/see something. Even if someone is telling me something, it wont go in if that makes any sense. I really have to think about what im reading or being told for me to understand it, its like i cant process the information. As i start to try and think about it I start getting really anxious and start to tense up. Does anyone else have this problem?

​

I also start to feel hot when it happens. Which is why im wondering if its anxiety.",3.9905660377358494,5.430127443396226,4.7171226415094365,84.84285377358493,71.73584905660377,7.564150943396226,29.287735849056602,8.07648339933343,1.955305660377357,423,17,83,6,8,136,69,106,0.11699999999999999,0.835,0.048,-0.7313,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,2,0,8,1,0,1,0,16,22,12,0,5,4,0,2,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,11,3,0,0,6,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,3,8,2,11,19,0,9,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,5,8,52,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049260234344337,0.0,0.1497045674159931,0.16788879144908592,0.09395872513777108,0.0,0.10569785738247618,0.1560900920007891,0.0,0.19322003637299365,0.14156906297361008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418228450452634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542132406835473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125841532831117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986170428462811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218688306973646,0.0,0.07852384717354467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218117730114728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686572775438755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29848949625439225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13500344803247175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922279647047802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13924047184064633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26441552046049577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2764100366210898,0.0,0.17702744120324812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.117068982992886,0.21273638087755656,0.1366513172151467,0.0,0.3911830335056984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076459702113758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770644743572729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202508977736646,0.0,0.0938067499784156,0.0,0.0,0.14383737368694274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246747938399616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498368989335879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16788879144908592,0.0
mentalhealth,eezybe,2020/04/06,"Trigger warning: suicide Yesterday my uncle killed him self. He has a wife 2 children, a mother, a stepmother, a father. My point is many people are devastated right now. Idk what he was going through but I do know that we are all distraught and heartbroken. I’m mostly posting this because I feel awful and I need to talk and I just want to let people know that someone will mourn your loss, and someone will be heartbroken. Please don’t make a drastic permanent choice like suicide please choose to try and get help. I know it can be hard, I myself have made multiple suicide attempts and this event just reminds me of those attempts and make me feel so ashamed and upset I put my family through the fear of possibly losing me to suicide. If you read this I’m sorry if I made you upset but I needed to say this",3.4403887884267625,5.580727487341776,4.270922242314652,84.54329113924051,74.75949367088606,6.792766726943943,28.374321880651003,7.7094869923839395,1.8677309222423149,645,27,119,9,14,207,99,158,0.387,0.545,0.068,-0.9971,0,0,0,0,0,4,13.0,1,3,0,4,4,10,1,5,6,1,14,0,0,5,1,31,30,13,6,5,6,3,3,1,0,2,0,1,0,2,9,9,0,0,6,1,0,2,1,9,0,0,3,4,21,1,9,22,2,8,0,3,0,0,15,2,0,3,4,77,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904482476661688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224009280222455,0.1459133168475742,0.13112876305718998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774653426234363,0.0,0.07369369997336553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161576691954284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691418398286965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434591841849608,0.0,0.2137875488471476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325950122654232,0.0,0.06334956801522257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14506608675435173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453912835887572,0.17310970373336612,0.13146369084544826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19229536877181974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797918740337186,0.0,0.0,0.2846745472610628,0.12257881674074887,0.1461819554347992,0.12418675324554795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035283974550918,0.0,0.0,0.1297037717940817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073634559498986,0.0,0.10311774013390887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13527271460506113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197357062701677,0.0,0.0,0.14515347292804126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5673459663989034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422277451358182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803652313554639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648194801167711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Olieb01,2020/04/06,I’m afraid to be mad at people I’ve developed a weird thing where i am afraid to be mad or angry at somebody when i’m really mad at them. I’m afraid they will hurt themselves because of it and i dont know why.,0.760625000000001,1.9455771458333369,3.1025000000000027,94.1925,79.625,6.466666666666668,20.333333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.2253583333333329,165,4,41,2,4,57,33,48,0.34600000000000003,0.654,0.0,-0.9517,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,2,0,2,8,3,3,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,9,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,8,0,0,0,0,4,0,6,6,0,5,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637997218644973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5071785052625851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4632666636766394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378274862416565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000136093895327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772300360244339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874991500368975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3904885858674124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,logf20,2020/04/06,"should school come before mental health? all my classss are online which i wouldent mind doing but this has made me incredibly depressed to the point that everything feels like it is spiralling out of control and i want to just end it all, i feel like i'm gettting a bit better though trying to catch up on classes but i just have that question",3.1233766233766223,5.827796272727272,2.9265367965367983,90.87409090909094,78.69696969696969,4.983549783549783,24.58008658008658,6.1826913282559595,0.6766086580086589,278,10,52,2,7,83,54,66,0.068,0.767,0.165,0.7105,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,2,2,17,12,4,0,2,4,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,2,6,3,7,10,3,7,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,1,3,35,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18999623798071094,0.0,0.0,0.19747447390797812,0.24376573146323124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19233737005925897,0.0,0.0,0.2504293555781309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923121572599804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19776126766788227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20067114899814367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22579582137551035,0.3190249095743773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373379519565392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21816827079414167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112744951774945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250153859679757,0.0,0.2254508152274049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21107332948107094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501265474863401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22597294940737855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21937308665541494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15159358320008842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13169730171376626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImpartialBlueberry,2020/04/06,"Help Please ♡ ☆☆ PLEASE READ TO THE END ☆☆

I am working on a opportunity that I became aware of a couple weeks ago. 

It is making cards for ages 0-18 years old.
Or anyone who is in foster care.
The cards are not labled with names, they are just delivered to each Child/Teen/Young Adult by the organization staff

The organization is called ""Cards for Cubs""
[ https://bearly.art/pages/cardsforcubs ]
[I can send the link if needed]

The deadline to get things completed, and turned In was extended from March 31, 2020 to April 30, 2020. Due to the current pandemic. 

You are able to:

♡ Make/Create your own card
♡ Print off a card & use that
♡ Email a message in to them & they will create a card for you
♡ Use random cards you have lying around
♡ Color or Draw pictures for any of them, but especially for those that can't read or are young.
♡ Whatever your beautiful creative minds can conjure up

☆☆ WHAT I NEED HELP WITH ☆☆

The kind, loving, supportive, etc... messages to put inside each card. 

- Maybe more simple for the younger kids, and can be more as the age goes up.

- Also some that may fit males, and females, along with other different genders

- What they need to hear

- What messages can bring them hope

- If you were ever a foster child, what kind of positive messages would you have wanted to receive?

♡ ALL MESSAGES YOU CAN HELP ME COME UP WITH FOR THESE BEAUTIFUL SOULS, IS SO BEYOND APPRECIATED ♡",4.8891804233831815,6.0781523985239865,5.212483977471353,83.09590211691594,69.2952029520295,8.066886774130898,25.702272285880753,8.371475516178862,1.4692095940959409,1104,31,221,16,19,350,157,271,0.006999999999999999,0.7509999999999999,0.24100000000000002,0.9972,2,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,0,8,6,2,6,7,0,0,16,0,23,1,0,3,2,37,39,12,0,8,8,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,4,14,12,0,0,1,2,0,5,2,0,0,0,2,2,19,7,38,33,8,29,1,0,1,1,34,11,0,9,13,132,33,4,0.13164059951766174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669144873313668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527293987383544,0.0,0.2852650691570499,0.0,0.08952012182051533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204616797914296,0.0,0.0,0.1171880429985394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441977040890432,0.0,0.13421636459430605,0.0,0.0,0.1133967202291874,0.13802266402705327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14565781952207327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753640822258914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659449817263813,0.0,0.14681406608314793,0.0,0.11907645883027862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877677998260037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836852300375894,0.0,0.2647077569758304,0.0,0.0,0.13074881823082307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741668539928222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11881078065684085,0.0,0.1757422447680939,0.0,0.1322506759146657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291947899624282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29282950959109905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13813466486143305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890036946805604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13233516189281008,0.0,0.0,0.2633524466668818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493841923209602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08745616493223506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318717072547008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273904234874106,0.0,0.0,0.07764503628584328,0.0,0.10559414849451183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583592428083107,0.0,0.0,0.09351370494403194,0.0,0.0,0.08477223008278319
mentalhealth,Ouisopsa12,2020/04/06,"Strong difficulty breathing caused by months of constant anxiety and stress. I am really struggling, not with anxiety and stress so much anymore, but the physical leftovers of it mostly, having huge difficulty breathing deeply, yawning (sometimes I can yawn like 20 times in day and none of them end up being completed, I just kind of open my mouth wide and nothing happens) and feeling bad shoulder, neck and upper back pain and tightness, and I don't know what I can do to recover in these things. 

Exercising works, but is hard in itself as I am struggling for air quite quickly, (I used to be very fit and capable so it's not like me) and it seems to only help for a few hours or a day, then I go back to feeling crappy, tight, and struggling to breath well.

What else can I try? Has anyone had this experience and found a way that helped them feel better and back to normal, where they weren't any longer struggling for breath and in pain nearly every day all day?",9.677934782608695,7.390867880434786,8.771304347826089,73.1421739130435,60.41304347826087,11.591304347826087,38.21739130434783,9.827888789773867,3.5597304347826086,766,28,143,11,8,240,120,184,0.222,0.647,0.131,-0.9535,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,3,4,9,15,0,6,4,0,14,12,7,2,1,35,23,21,0,1,6,0,6,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,10,16,0,2,6,1,0,1,5,9,1,0,3,6,14,6,22,18,5,29,0,0,0,0,5,13,0,3,16,98,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926254794330131,0.0,0.1783311017896062,0.0,0.1155929194524494,0.08149914962215793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688747062402289,0.09731996983801687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10308492282439156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973583043365495,0.0,0.0,0.1222074747244072,0.12595637729773054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30067769721793497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736816053253987,0.0,0.10323463388335104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09820404065859786,0.0,0.0,0.11401481094791968,0.0,0.0,0.17680369791549203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277983974505768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624185451813376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307069843062497,0.0,0.10441190260212246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625098843012072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478486376328363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213758592321868,0.06405651009353354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388742510601745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303444010681854,0.0,0.08568258032809735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420081152843492,0.1118392902083248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864661705302608,0.2480490778063603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12397238994585742,0.0,0.0,0.07466920195584761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10610883548156136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527754943885125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670305953947389,0.4874014495740685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774350874966073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679651448443237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07913434336903809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1006675592983164,0.0,0.09617147829155896,0.0,0.09251727740712568,0.0,0.0,0.10479846464394073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485466047767537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ParadoxIllusionist,2020/04/06,"How to deal with unwanted thoughts? I’m not sure what is causing this, I have never in my life experience something like that and have been overall mentally well so its a bit of a shock that this is happening to me.

I’ve been struggling to keep certain disturbing thoughts away (nothing grazy but I dont want to get i to the details) and i have no ideo how to stip them. 

They happen mostly in my dreams where I guess my subconscious kinda just takes over and throws all this shit on me. 
In the real world if those thoughts come to me whenever I feel relaxed, so my brain is kind of like “to u cant enjoy yourself because every time you do you will thing of THAT”. 
I hope once I move out it will be easier...okey now i feel like I should say it. Its a person who I live with, someone who i have grown to absolutely despise and I guess im deeply afraid of never getting rid of them. I want to forget them, like i never even met them in my life but i know that’s impossible.  Im afraid i can never live in peace again and not think about this personality when I am feeling most happy and relaxed.",3.1065803921568613,4.333279093333335,4.2562091503268,88.12117647058822,73.62222222222222,7.249673202614379,25.679738562091497,7.724431198458867,1.1947856209150325,856,28,186,11,17,280,130,225,0.138,0.705,0.157,0.823,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,2,5,0,12,20,2,4,5,0,18,4,2,3,7,47,40,14,0,6,6,0,3,4,0,3,2,1,0,2,17,10,0,1,8,3,0,4,9,7,1,0,6,4,33,13,27,30,4,23,0,0,0,0,14,11,1,7,12,130,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103567714731927,0.0,0.0,0.07160202937824672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12823500910818136,0.0,0.0,0.13112329731205474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066293932268493,0.0,0.10118068792254754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12109526282809464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13766129083517514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07758068436251359,0.0,0.09896442991470857,0.0,0.0,0.11489762225284028,0.0,0.0,0.17817268061145825,0.08391286572447892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273515314503852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25878907100054604,0.0,0.2077375399767647,0.1250374873088387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11666347445426115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25375215327954165,0.0,0.0,0.10440312116247462,0.0,0.12231566678686992,0.06455249663067003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592979306352576,0.22953850013674185,0.0,0.20743722582789229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11837123247750958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484052560099285,0.0,0.0,0.3623670605246871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270525655874312,0.0,0.0,0.1250901993038799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051216606603508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13369426840050488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934082589250652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057016617418385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952278686340453,0.09042581967870897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279384400380375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107038924379384,0.0,0.08831468966084567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07803466372772297,0.07526310339439128,0.0,0.2797484193521249,0.06849139575602799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13856094196189409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560991421401678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,superhiddenuser-,2020/04/06,"I'm suicidal even though I'm not depressed, anxious, or anything really. I'm in a good place in my life. I was depressed before, and epileptic, but that's all in the past now.

I finally started doing chemistry research, nano-composites, and it brings me a lot of pride.

I feel neutral about self esteem for the most part. I used to be needy, but I don't have that need to vent to friends or anything anymore. I keep a healthy distance from people. Not because I can't get close to them, but because I genuinely don't need or want close friends nowadays.

I'm playing violin again, a hobby I abandoned for a while. So I'm not sitting around depressed and watching a wall like the past.

Over all I feel pretty good. However, I avoid old close friends because I want to completely remove my old immature phases. I actually have fantasies about poisoning these people I ""opened up to"", even though none of them responded negatively to it.

Ofc such fantasies are are casual, not serious at all. the only intense one is suicide.

Looking back at myself all I want to tell that tween is ""stop throwing your problems at people and just get to therapy dumbass"". I've heard the self acceptance speech a million times, and it never helped me in the past and I don't think it'll help me now.

So does anyone have actionable tips?
Not interested in feel good comments atm.

I'm using an anonymous account because like I said, I don't want this small part of me seeping into my life.",4.658753799392096,6.182509049645393,5.338632218844985,80.70500000000003,70.20567375886525,8.208308004052686,32.93211752786221,8.704169506293173,2.813909625126646,1160,55,212,20,21,375,153,282,0.134,0.6709999999999999,0.195,0.9567,1,1,0,0,0,1,39.0,0,1,2,1,15,21,1,1,14,0,16,3,0,2,5,49,42,17,2,7,12,0,3,2,3,1,3,3,0,2,9,12,0,4,5,4,2,4,13,8,0,2,3,8,29,13,29,37,9,39,0,4,2,0,15,19,0,5,17,139,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0959696605078012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110084650182678,0.09753092665163994,0.06876448507072706,0.0,0.16185763847422638,0.08754710391709906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562054659003689,0.0,0.2397986152823809,0.0,0.08368359026195442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311192337806928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541109014827535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606158931558906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12991070814846334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14917720371469656,0.0,0.0,0.1077311603822388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279412355065531,0.0,0.10276147207774806,0.0,0.0,0.24745910897371035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183596161435496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08741275946826063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13892669997009166,0.0960919246366846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08258427989294702,0.0,0.0,0.08360864154480993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14584181599758506,0.07584903676292144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20639119059831484,0.0,0.06664051094640892,0.07479512366906914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129941650484584,0.2816417292543746,0.2045382599031881,0.0,0.1027486586084354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000513104787142,0.0,0.09410202715247827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300175212797557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354776475547198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2051886998519987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06960846393667293,0.0,0.0,0.08222007562495214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21514497870384136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595708276238663,0.0,0.11246505523440027,0.0,0.0,0.06301493174337602,0.19324516835997274,0.0,0.05734523868831445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16987546276417995,0.0,0.0,0.2320236053587267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NotActuallyThatGood,2020/04/06,"I think I had a panic attack? I'm not sure I'm a little emotional right now so this isn't going to be very to-the-point, but I'd appreciate if you read it

So, I was on the nosleep subreddit and I read this story where the main character accidentally snapped his neighbour's neck without realising (it makes sense in the context of the story). Since I was little I've always been scared of accidentally killing people/things because when I was very young we had a pet duck and one night it was quacking so I thought it was cold and I brought it to my bed and crushed it in my sleep. Since then I've always been really cautious about stuff like that. Whenever I have any animals on my bed like kittens, I always put them on some raised blankets or pillows so I wouldn't be able to roll onto them and crush them.

So I'd been reading stuff all day and after reading that I started to feel a little odd. Like the whole bit disconnected from reality thing. I was really wrapped up in my thoughts and not really focusing on anything. Like, staring into the distance as I was walking around and doing stuff. I decided to have a shower and I kept having thoughts like I could die so easily if I just slipped over, my parents just cleaned it and what if that reacts with the body wash and creates a toxic gas and a whole bunch of stuff like that.

My thoughts were kinda distressing me so I went over and talked to my parents about them but I noticed my thinking was really disorganised and I was stuttering and struggling to use words to convey my point, something I never struggle with.

So then I went to my room and started thinking about it more and I started crying and shaking and hyperventilating and I felt cold but I didn't want to do anything about it because I didn't really see the point in it and my head was feeling really heavy and my neck ached but I couldn't lie down because I was so afraid it'd snap my neck and my body started to feel numb and I curled up in a ball and started rocking back and forth and my perception of everything like time and the space around me and my own body seemed all fucked up and I started getting terrified of myself and thought I might accidentally gouge my eyes out because my face went numb and I was so amazed by the feeling of my face being numb that I ended up shoving my hands into my mouth and making myself throw up, which only made me feel worse.

And after probably only minutes of this is finally clicked that I was having a panic attack. And I calmed my breathing almost instantly and as soon as my breathing was back to normal, I felt completely fine. The panic stopped. I still feel a little paranoid I might accidentally kill myself/someone/something and that I might hurt myself, but I'm honestly really confused about all of this. Nothing like this has ever happened to me before and it really slowly came on after thinking about it for a while and it stopped almost instantly once I realised what was happening. It makes me feel like I was faking it because it feels like I forced it onto myself by thinking about everything then I was able to stop it on command. But it also felt so real",5.2514397347856985,6.136262718446607,5.907306811903073,79.55709093061807,68.25566343042071,8.55354013734312,31.25440050517009,8.700769036622559,2.4622891625226933,2512,100,473,39,41,818,254,618,0.19699999999999998,0.708,0.095,-0.9972,3,0,2,0,0,3,34.0,1,1,4,0,31,36,5,10,22,0,44,20,15,6,6,118,93,69,3,8,15,2,12,10,1,4,4,0,7,0,40,48,0,4,24,6,0,10,9,21,0,1,40,18,83,15,68,43,11,76,0,1,4,1,11,36,1,13,40,345,123,4,0.1078981342989565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10804439564719708,0.0,0.0,0.04314304950817665,0.13466983691408332,0.0,0.0,0.03668721565398594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0887909710111837,0.0960522152589547,0.0,0.12274970444548025,0.0,0.08296700512154094,0.0,0.164434252985922,0.0,0.04590668260765556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058898408641341875,0.1797757549694087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170336062352578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056564570482272425,0.0,0.0,0.04307394024331086,0.0,0.05926051701066973,0.03479268521644381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599061424191463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06068543919724216,0.04778286056294847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488000198790867,0.0,0.0,0.09697188579603966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21822615471097456,0.07708244870224118,0.15539869442097715,0.0590985660526842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987504325600622,0.028186160919970456,0.0,0.030660498117788832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541396382150652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055367307201614126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05775359218466303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193732991632184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635678913659465,0.21628455284900652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05104791177070864,0.108034263730946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716943042356266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04160884644017079,0.0,0.0,0.05062754490974999,0.05285863133495169,0.05176558494431155,0.06142137052169048,0.0,0.05745399580711509,0.03655728411331837,0.08206139321049992,0.0,0.189892818972114,0.11980810925568335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299791900741253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581662190289643,0.0,0.0,0.054233713317557664,0.0,0.0,0.2158546661329176,0.061405849370004775,0.2764892308861717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04607220857295954,0.0,0.0,0.054012427707486106,0.0,0.04299042170886405,0.049113204547625834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925445168065127,0.0,0.053988028520573966,0.0,0.0,0.08306525520923598,0.0,0.0,0.2291125644163527,0.0,0.04308379471442434,0.13531150744884268,0.0,0.1127985571658652,0.2470350987396888,0.0,0.0,0.050846357327398985,0.0,0.0,0.04336221662040764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03584136301302679,0.17284191930765047,0.0,0.2141476657370382,0.031458134901766334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046594672429400186,0.0,0.08902726080339772,0.03182055757689426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15003397722042458,0.0,0.1204644136802669,0.0,0.052004975555146285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05497870842306776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ManicTypist,2020/04/06,"I have attachment issues. Need coping skills? When my SO leaves, even just to ""go to the bathroom"" I feel as if he's leaving me. When he goes to work, I think about my late doggo and how a year without him is fastly approaching, and then I think, ""my bf is cheating on me,"" and other things. I Just don't know what to do or how to cope with this anymore. 

How does one overcome attachment/abandonment issues?",2.6142328042328025,4.435767037037039,3.636437389770727,89.60111111111117,76.16049382716051,6.603880070546737,23.917107583774253,7.447530270364453,0.9924589065255732,314,10,65,4,7,101,58,81,0.052000000000000005,0.919,0.028999999999999998,-0.4137,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,10,1,1,0,2,0,5,0,0,3,0,17,11,13,0,2,5,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,1,11,0,10,11,0,9,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,6,48,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328008065671496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20542414693424876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15504475696562714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11869251644406273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13340918486507305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4900189405570999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12900796421000313,0.0,0.26479899547357355,0.497115382693114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740580837334059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15906713112430065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595203331830018,0.30082615718457645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262827358866297,0.0,0.1708948393531198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511660345566327
mentalhealth,imnotanark,2020/04/06,"my friends don't want me around anymore they're online friends,  but the only pastime other than my parents who I even talk to anymore. 
I only ever annoy them and bring them down....  I should just leave them alone. 
I've been trying to just chill and not really say anything, but itd be better if I just weren't around anymore.
I'm completely alone.   I don't feel like I'm a living person anymore.   I'm just waiting to die.",2.8408803986710964,4.421518337209303,4.020033222591362,88.12313953488373,74.93023255813954,5.84451827242525,25.07641196013289,6.1826913282559595,0.7785900332225917,331,11,66,2,7,108,56,86,0.218,0.691,0.09,-0.8841,1,2,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,3,1,8,5,1,0,2,0,7,0,0,0,1,17,14,5,1,3,8,1,1,1,2,1,0,1,0,1,3,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,2,2,11,4,7,9,0,5,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,1,2,41,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3267521914185689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6257620326865787,0.0,0.0,0.1298105743668978,0.28085272837949543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395125046401868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539247852567815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637142540761916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418898854654786,0.14268925178940498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976053804317286,0.11269295544008115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2437465662783051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670290241585149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706616781694217,0.0,0.1392915963780349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399441399207384,0.0,0.0,0.17515699286961736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773672228339273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105539296071857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254450395645012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126789338627865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709840143430524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930420021020225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,michael_whoknknows,2020/04/06,How do you cope being alone and unhappy? Theres only so much I can occupy myself with to keep my mind off it.,1.2512500000000024,2.5580616250000037,4.331666666666667,85.38000000000002,78.58333333333334,8.133333333333335,16.166666666666668,8.841846274778883,0.6955666666666671,85,1,19,2,2,31,24,24,0.19399999999999998,0.8059999999999999,0.0,-0.5859,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,3,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,16,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.517780249662825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4443637930249684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5047902378113492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675085857641356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3802218927252509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seanie259,2020/04/06,"How do I deal with this empty feeling, especially during quarantine? 
I’m 21, uni student in my final year.
Early February: I broke up with my first girlfriend (about a year, broke up a few times beforehand, very toxic, but I did love her)

After that I started going gym which was great, mentally. I was also going out a lot more as well, trying to get the most out of single life, n it was fun. But every night, that’s when my brain would decide to have deep thoughts about me and my ex etc (I miss the good parts, I miss the love but I don’t wanna get back with her, we was toxic and she was aggressive)

Even now in quarantine, 2 odd months after everything, my brain still has deep thoughts about it, especially at night.  I don’t know if it’s love or the affection I miss. I understand it was my first love so that’s always gonna hit harder.

At the moment life just feels pretty empty, I work out at home (though feels lacklustre due to no equipment) and I call my friends and family (as I’m still at uni house). But besides that I don’t really know what to do, I just wanna get my head on probably and stop thinking negatively, and deeply about the past, but I’m struggling to. 

Anyone ever felt this or have any advice? 

(I’m not depressed cos I’m fine 80% of the time, it’s just those late night deep thoughts sucker-punching me)",3.1143901575500124,4.534485055762083,4.320212426978227,86.90396530359358,73.90706319702602,7.502991679943353,23.218445742609312,8.11559375814309,1.1298378828111173,1036,28,217,16,21,340,147,269,0.087,0.71,0.204,0.9927,0,2,0,0,0,0,42.0,1,0,0,3,19,18,1,1,10,0,16,9,3,3,1,47,47,21,0,4,12,1,4,0,2,2,2,0,1,0,14,13,0,1,12,1,0,2,6,8,1,2,11,4,29,10,32,33,7,43,0,6,0,4,13,15,0,5,26,142,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597809820220054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672907348346608,0.0902408021290067,0.0,0.0,0.07375112002120474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583220223641407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08339294006703771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24213673321259585,0.11074167929000724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180931211230248,0.09340960066764066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12095271530358825,0.07163156302892007,0.09810109758898193,0.0913755383483306,0.0,0.09746971881810364,0.0,0.10223895051676044,0.0,0.16450986100630746,0.0,0.10413098549525952,0.1188039310243775,0.0,0.18449853427087848,0.0,0.0,0.08378979280352064,0.0,0.16998517602574298,0.0,0.12327161035723293,0.0909644427528556,0.0,0.1195687794111013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113031023446858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10878625917684576,0.0,0.0,0.1251391165976404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11920483220971105,0.0,0.1223386479200012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15320579507479504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220206343167843,0.39152887488710336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10929416864129554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656539988257382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3053247356981343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744301278863688,0.1035297632155322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033473460081114,0.11692966403458188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947716693731014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767629265191574,0.0,0.1732199109859259,0.09067077861881397,0.0,0.11337764095017408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06949170117339752,0.10655359865787473,0.2582964651281822,0.1264785370830588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07363183000102372,0.0,0.0,0.11290241959717848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948430781169303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751142682824206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895439159644761,0.0,0.0,0.07704123203476584,0.0,0.0,0.1396791422566573
mentalhealth,stitchitch,2020/04/06,"Anybody else aware of themselves as a person within their body? So I don't go through depersonalization, but it may be similar(?). Does anyone else start crying and internally realize your crying, like a narrative? ""Woah, I'm crying"" kind of realization. Or when high, just watch what you're doing like you're trying to persuade yourself not to do what your body is doing? Or like, look in the mirror and think about how you're inside the body, and that the body isn't really you, just a face? And that face is looking at YOU.
I promise I'm not high right now. The last time really freaked me out.",4.16749758454106,5.863235991304354,5.0924637681159455,81.31077294685994,71.69565217391305,7.893719806763285,24.951690821256037,8.515128840125781,1.6273574879227055,469,14,90,8,9,153,73,115,0.134,0.764,0.102,-0.7140000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,4,1,0,7,6,0,0,7,0,9,6,6,1,0,16,16,11,0,0,7,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,3,8,5,11,14,0,13,0,0,3,0,6,7,0,3,8,55,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691989506510566,0.1420231461025166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6158614102874761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4567723693899898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12129924621734565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315830765166764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877571261271189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928998434710676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14434181945160154,0.0,0.1129863031203358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031547079021785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327963259819147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102960514550898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1775952571703487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11837286687363592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098109438519703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881620455415452,0.0,0.0,0.0808250728619338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410763536713003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lowlifekitten,2020/04/06,I need help So I was diagnosed with BPD and I lost my medical insurance soon after. I just got my medical insurance back and I can finally go see my mental health provider! These last few month have been hard and I have self medicated because I wasn’t able to get my medication (I couldn’t afford it) I know my mental health provider does drug test. I haven’t done hard drugs just the occasional THC use which is still illegal in my state. I’m going to pee dirty. I already no. What happens if I do? Should I tell them immediately I’ve self medicated?,0.9482121212121228,3.5236113363636363,3.1463636363636382,85.56621212121216,90.1818181818182,7.296969696969698,22.78787878787879,8.238735603445708,1.791042424242424,437,17,90,12,15,148,74,110,0.14,0.8340000000000001,0.026000000000000002,-0.8674,1,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,6,1,0,0,1,0,12,11,1,1,0,12,23,5,0,4,3,0,2,0,0,1,10,0,0,2,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,6,3,20,0,5,15,1,11,0,1,1,0,5,1,0,1,7,54,24,1,0.12377875002568607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365929286069473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517821836348796,0.0,0.07545437714283704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15589500257679062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563282575385232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10831961827775467,0.1266686363403753,0.0,0.0,0.2870881057550096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355935703956364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466928810891452,0.0,0.14069263224402226,0.0,0.09899717379954798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945713986211464,0.0,0.22176289479754355,0.0,0.0,0.26314204624401344,0.0,0.0,0.08296628699814701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680255639201488,0.10089620180062872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351191274509381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6234703423296049,0.24947973390636746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879901735234432,0.0,0.0,0.09178037474919958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863563808168227,0.0,0.2582564628381933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884986966204254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818808329170068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690509801008173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pixelise,2020/04/06,"I'm scared that nobody cares about me I've been battling anxiety and panic attacks for quite a while now. The whole situation with Covid-19 kinda even makes it worse. And for the past 3 days I also have been isolating from all of my friends/ online friends with contacts.   
I honestly don't really know why, it might somehow be related to my birthday that was on 3rd of April but I don't really know. I disappeared from the net on 4th of April. And like... It might kinda sound selfish now that I think about it but I really wish someone would phone me or send me an SMS to just check if everything's ok but so far nothing.   
So here I am scared to contact anybody for no actual reason and wondering if I'm selfish for wanting someone to check on me. Any tips?",3.57689845474614,5.2115353377483435,4.71220198675497,83.69073123620309,73.10596026490066,8.212141280353201,28.47737306843267,8.841846274778883,2.272774392935983,600,24,118,12,12,197,96,151,0.157,0.7490000000000001,0.095,-0.8388,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,11,13,2,3,5,1,11,0,0,2,1,28,21,14,0,5,7,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,0,0,7,6,0,0,5,0,2,2,3,7,0,0,3,1,13,6,20,14,2,13,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,9,8,79,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.15524905161438926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722434715041098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818676736006097,0.0,0.12170354046766416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18098802923078466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622030256101558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259999496402997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507755330114553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297998174662138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24582533305462664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748635877903844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777234184674123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106193920223774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33753904765404114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15265130361614807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18665803026355893,0.0,0.0,0.15186956353504366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921197284419034,0.0,0.0,0.30575169953168563,0.16357118563506354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31855401653011745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788240106234646,0.0,0.0,0.2695931603916342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10193855369436633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938355009632589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355412865649128,0.17761848733507293,0.1829458379473484,0.0,0.1725264971732203,0.0,0.0,0.16212646917719498,0.11301308840979335,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Animegirl0205,2020/04/06,"I want to disappear Do anyone feel like god just screwed them? 

It's like my impact on earth is zero.i could die tomorrow and I think the world would be better for it. 


My friends care about me. But I feel like this person that will always come last. I'm tired of being this sensitive fat girl. 

When I was younger I didn't take my classmates jokes and insults well. Once I started crying in class. I'm in college now and they still mock me. My friends only talk about themselves, I maybe have two friends I can be honest with

My mom and step dad just went through a divorce. And Covid-19 is making it hard for my mum to get a job. And I don't know whether I will be able to attend college. I am 20 and I have never been kissed. It's just I hate myself. I'm fat and ugly. And I want to just give up",-0.3956832298136668,1.8480065952380968,1.0253623188405818,100.72108695652176,93.16666666666666,3.636024844720497,18.018633540372672,5.192301501255418,-0.7019273291925465,620,18,143,3,23,196,106,168,0.16699999999999998,0.645,0.188,0.2062,1,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,2,1,10,16,4,0,3,0,19,5,2,1,1,27,37,12,1,4,6,3,3,3,3,3,3,0,0,2,7,11,2,0,4,1,0,5,3,4,1,1,4,3,25,12,15,25,0,17,0,0,0,2,14,5,1,0,10,90,32,4,0.16293361595560998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557382081490474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392697267142952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14410154265288044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612168042301265,0.0,0.0,0.14035288301744098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13008923431155905,0.0,0.17897492635404608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909936946146167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476826366909356,0.2327996155887273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3776463225389841,0.0,0.08512608949980527,0.15630077109657536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459565164725335,0.16086321350546434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16168647276656584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954405424702779,0.13281264346385738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23880340398322014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875945385063243,0.0,0.16368871699387055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19082588178501692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566444916377584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735189834147531,0.0,0.12391835700416935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226734880990013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11532525198809974,0.0,0.13011899617208206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250580185992264,0.1309598686894403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10440128213329307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872682230378044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159162467608267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922049363100881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649688828473295,0.15104109435289725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574336598104674,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tumblle,2020/04/06,"What is a crisis team? (UK) I've been referred to a crisis team today but I've no idea what they are or what they do. Google is giving me mixed info about whether it's at home or hospital and what they actually do apart from monitoring you. I'm also worried they'll call social services (UK CPS) and my son will be taken away because of my mental state, the fear of him being taken is actually one of the reasons I've fallen into the pit I'm in currently. Any help or advice would be appreciated.",3.9568907563025206,4.765770823529415,6.057563025210083,77.58617647058827,71.15686274509805,8.181512605042016,26.336134453781508,8.418075326091056,1.7569310924369756,392,12,77,6,7,138,71,102,0.161,0.741,0.098,-0.7311,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,4,2,2,1,0,1,5,0,13,0,0,1,0,13,18,8,0,1,5,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,4,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,3,0,9,0,10,9,0,9,0,0,0,0,13,5,0,3,2,51,14,3,0.0,0.0,0.4467574459051934,0.0,0.0,0.22368378028105973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18305562513531395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155663572060238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21506422825795796,0.0,0.0,0.13953865253911418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337380824762452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575822981522028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.219586989088014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15343051433556068,0.0,0.2296108545832229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25840641806948217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306828790012483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15511227353885768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353529517832885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333403043522893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169756244678958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324646205371568,0.0,0.16260788135834728,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway68627372,2020/04/06,"Voyeuristic Disorder (18 yo) HELP Throwaway for obv reasons

Hello,

I am an 18 year old male that is doing pretty well in life. I am heading off to a great college soon and worked my ass off in school, played a lot of sports, and created some hobbies (music, programming).

However, I have been struggling recently with voyeuristic disorder. I've always been surrounded by ass and girls in provoking clothes at my high school, and combined with a chronic use of porn and masturbation, I soon turned to masturbating to changing room vids and upskirts. I felt very sick at myself for jerking off to this kinda stuff but the urge was incontrollable. This escalated, and I soon used my phone as a spy camera, taking creep videos of ass and even tempted to do some upskirts. I would masturbate to these videos but then I would delete them right after, feeling sick at myself. The problem is, I want to free myself of these voyeuristic urges, since after doing some research, I found that voyeurism can escalate very quickly into far more sinister things (the worst being rape). Is there any way to treat this? Support groups/therapy is not an option right now, so I was thinking of going porn/masturbation free, but the urge to just wank it to some upskirts or pictures of people I know at school are just too incontrollable. Please help me, I realize I can have a beautiful life ahead of me but I feel like my voyeuristic disorder might shatter everything. Should I jerk off without porn instead? Will masturbating to regular porn (not voyeur porn) help me rid my voyeuristic urges? I feel like I get a different ""rush"" from watching/commiting voyeur than just watching regular porn..

Please help, or at least refer me to a subreddit that can help me.",7.683157894736841,8.437522656050959,6.939339591015756,74.74613979215556,62.88535031847135,10.177405296681194,35.953067381830365,10.064110947511567,3.686034394904458,1390,61,235,28,19,428,173,314,0.126,0.696,0.17800000000000002,0.9507,2,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,1,2,14,15,3,1,13,0,25,15,4,4,0,49,40,17,0,5,12,0,4,2,0,5,5,0,1,2,11,11,0,0,10,4,2,2,3,6,1,0,6,5,32,11,44,28,8,34,0,0,1,9,10,19,3,10,14,164,43,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004016086426489,0.0,0.0,0.07358714189104555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11447281378510228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305738845343065,0.3720572960383412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147229751861346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725300479078663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16414409002692698,0.1546118174641249,0.10389946081755652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11864769743928745,0.0,0.0,0.05653574374637396,0.0,0.0614987642213925,0.0,0.0,0.1193029303654514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105563119308634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3626575209406685,0.1143307868420554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059469896181862714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15286515753873195,0.1057327871528586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199706150148404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479469439557305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354916611497283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750198325916475,0.0,0.0,0.2375662080770433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008941651660782,0.0,0.10354324408824532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11125885670059817,0.1068452369399553,0.0,0.0,0.1848230828672261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285457093511824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951319803303152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312555727253605,0.12387562355833127,0.0,0.12279647897086003,0.0,0.0,0.08136115099487208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12374862707967516,0.0,0.07189053239916621,0.06933719342874607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177024163380643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869189967299432,0.0,0.17857069707057405,0.06382560910448097,0.08589279800595598,0.0,0.0,0.09729462006739756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431147327478164,0.0,0.0787788445200355,0.0,0.0,0.1537398773489344,0.0,0.0,0.06968428993013871
mentalhealth,crunchitymunchity156,2020/04/06,"I (17m) can’t get over my ex completely I was with my exgirlfriend for about 6 months until I decided to end it. It was a pretty unhealthy relationship lots of useless fights, she was very untrustworthy and manipulative. I tried my very best to keep it going and she gave little effort. I honestly really loved this girl and it broke my heart finally coming to my senses. This was a little over a year ago, and I have a new girlfriend now and we’ve been together for 4 months. It’s been great and I’ve worked out things in myself and she is an amazing person. But every now And then I’ll see something that reminds me of her, or even one of her Instagram posts and it just makes my heart ache. I don’t know why I still get this feeling and I feel horrible because I have somebody else now and I just do not understand why I’m getting these feelings. I try best to ignore them but sometimes it’s just really hard because I don’t have anyone to talk to about it.",2.015190655209452,4.160462790816329,3.7249946294307215,86.72977980665951,79.25510204081633,6.983458646616543,23.070891514500538,8.032893268588372,1.2836265306122456,761,25,156,14,19,254,115,196,0.085,0.816,0.099,0.5608,0,0,1,0,1,0,14.0,0,0,1,4,10,10,1,0,5,0,14,3,2,2,0,32,30,16,0,0,7,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,14,14,0,2,6,0,0,2,4,4,0,1,7,5,27,6,19,23,3,22,0,2,1,1,15,6,0,2,13,107,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858522926049417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353998129990668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309842185385726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807813935060801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523703074866133,0.14026262793448752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117535085659822,0.0,0.11848670529349856,0.0,0.0,0.0883584396681385,0.0,0.11271288313274665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029249958244113,0.0,0.0,0.14654615267179105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20967886620433765,0.0,0.076028545839118,0.0,0.0,0.1474896028378348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983790582073575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170527525629269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11890713465860155,0.0,0.0,0.07352033467914065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681593752554423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113732412284745,0.12073895573128547,0.0,0.08929717906853048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21355903290242625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292026497607673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065075003952774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11680890692711828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281213762526895,0.13609929168500542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714019296400115,0.0,0.0,0.1436264217315376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660294020595322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298806201797092,0.13230886296116054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10683447636058792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752487651522157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887548728999238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18165158859296127,0.0,0.0,0.1392665636283345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207600526553473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414258500986337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09739124139442183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614799497673514
mentalhealth,watersbhmjhx,2020/04/06,Depression panic attacks anxiety I keep failing in my life I’m so sad about everything that even before covid I never wanted to leaves the house Because every person I meets doesn’t show the same love I give back,5.39211382113821,6.987787073170736,5.857073170731707,77.41211382113823,68.51219512195122,8.393495934959349,28.300813008130078,8.841846274778883,2.4110422764227644,174,6,29,3,3,56,36,41,0.37,0.5479999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.9286,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,4,6,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,5,1,3,6,1,3,0,3,0,1,4,1,0,0,2,17,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987161517278717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955151882956833,0.0,0.19973987107814875,0.0,0.15834765371668144,0.0,0.22103714246997547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22373142834174528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17156942965461064,0.0,0.21885951298419448,0.0,0.2334560821947406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491860418320353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997288618911023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308871608853983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27504897408462353,0.0,0.0,0.1834765972519085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344440876243729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20034339220742609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30477310126350965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268129407370101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15321353491626727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blecktittle,2020/04/06,"In need of some external input Okay so for the past four years now I’ve noticed more frequent and severe changes in my mood. Initially, I thought I was depressed, I was always feeling like nothing could go the right way and feeling an empty hopelessness and guilt (amongst other things but I don’t feel like listing all of them out). Along with this though I would have terrible outbursts and I was extremely irritable, lashing out at the people close to me for no real reason. I just pushed it to the back of my head and disregarded it, but now for almost the last year I’ve found it almost unbearable and endlessly frustrating. I’ll have a week to two at the most where I feel really good everyday, be more motivated than normal, more talkative, and have much higher energy to the point where it’s even weird to me. Unfortunately though the highs are always followed by the lows, which thankfully usually last only four days to a week, but I’ll be sleeping most of the day, not leaving my room, not eating etc. I’ve also noticed that I’ve gotten more and more anxious and I’ve recently started to have anxiety attacks, which I’ve never had before. I went to a couple therapy sessions at my school, but now campus is closed and they’ve switched to phone calls or zoom sessions (which I really don’t feel comfortable with). Now I KNOW I shouldn’t diagnose myself and that’s really not what I’m trying to do, I just want something to make sense of what I’m feeling so I can stop feeling like I’m going insane. I’ve done some research and I feel like my symptoms match up with bipolar ii or cyclothymia, but I’m not a doctor nor a diagnosed individual; so if anyone who has experienced what I described or has enough knowledge to have an idea of wtf is going on with my brain could you please respond, it would be greatly appreciated :)",9.853643192488263,7.2303294253521155,9.59492957746479,68.42460093896713,60.38028169014085,12.734272300469485,40.00469483568075,11.072351349416056,4.303982159624414,1466,58,269,29,15,480,192,355,0.147,0.718,0.135,-0.6533,1,0,1,0,0,1,32.0,0,1,1,1,17,18,2,1,17,1,27,9,3,3,2,71,53,28,0,9,15,0,8,4,0,3,5,0,1,0,17,21,1,2,15,0,0,6,10,8,0,3,9,9,27,9,37,36,13,46,0,3,0,0,6,18,0,10,25,185,44,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18368623431929548,0.0,0.0,0.07334748141018907,0.1526347576596606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016462156769931,0.10361612341934273,0.0,0.06413190894849619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434336199640584,0.0,0.07052608630108488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804593294987905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238850033040278,0.09365513704704127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702631594055176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14645997755263282,0.10148509410345877,0.0,0.11830206075905765,0.0,0.07899725747455487,0.18618527776023908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938780656989416,0.0,0.09386016393020727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938512174677285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477002570196824,0.10229069308497914,0.06057939427484048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3710061993380108,0.2620956811209164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056491665326296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15637770218088815,0.07692936757908786,0.0,0.10112028726752936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941299370813589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969059349470872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035393472973834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05040624708260786,0.14952610708612651,0.0,0.0971169530580474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17923666715884434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0612230030174944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742386228015043,0.06800831893687855,0.07073918338089266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986493823237074,0.08800665049583146,0.20884489547611612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975627107514289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755596108495463,0.06358625893925378,0.0,0.0,0.10067968629195108,0.08670390053649286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439606023421424,0.17627221203989166,0.09430218952844242,0.0905612378458751,0.0,0.0,0.07832734357804376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928243098146247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10361612341934273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178502594108616,0.0,0.0,0.0706096037687061,0.0,0.0,0.06491903002894381,0.0,0.0,0.07668101343730674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533093894753804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444233693355735,0.10488842714028476,0.0,0.06093388708685477,0.0,0.1802264865250092,0.07281447236920932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06227103628897725,0.0,0.08959592835061045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10101528675130696,0.0,0.05409811735470304,0.07280210454151051,0.14714255824921466,0.0,0.0,0.08502423511645202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13030879052490535,0.0,0.0,0.1181277843584302
mentalhealth,Janx_xx,2020/04/06,"I can asure my best friend and his girlfriend can read my mind, or at least my dreams I will say my current situation and then elaborate.
Last night I had a dream where I could see some things that I shouldn’t be able to see, and now I have this very strong sensation that leads me to believe that they know about that dream and that’s the reason they’re trying not to talk to me. Also I feel like they know I feel guilty and they find it funny.
Since I was in kindergarten I felt this weird sensation that all the other kids could see what I was doing at all times. I remember being 3 or 4 and wanting to dance alone in my room because I was so sure they could see me that I didn’t want them to have a reason to laugh at me.
I couldn’t think freely in school because I knew that everybody could see it as long as it was something I wasn’t supposed to think.
Nowadays I can’t have a conversation with anybody because I feel like they know something I was ‘hiding’. I want to know if this could cause any major harm. I don’t mind being alone, I’ve been alone most of the time I can remember, but I don’t enjoy feeling anxious about things like this. Any sincere help would be appreciated.",6.006423861852433,5.116688844897961,5.968163265306121,85.84084772370487,66.6734693877551,9.00784929356358,29.05023547880691,7.882392219407189,1.5341993720565146,937,25,208,9,13,295,124,245,0.053,0.7509999999999999,0.196,0.9836,1,3,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,6,3,6,12,0,0,6,0,32,0,0,4,3,49,52,15,0,12,5,0,5,3,2,3,0,1,1,1,19,7,0,0,17,5,0,2,8,2,0,0,11,11,40,10,21,28,7,18,0,0,5,0,14,8,0,5,11,140,59,3,0.0986570285728334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3065367845951852,0.0,0.0788959901058922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418032504638022,0.0,0.0,0.11145436068058023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18042122674969935,0.0,0.0,0.1111526869875878,0.10353446483222152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10134794467355933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3938480475996457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995358318338262,0.14096120185007718,0.09472621891800788,0.0,0.09017073679279868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622217554603039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612772665146098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168772911977393,0.08041864586505644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445965224050577,0.0,0.0,0.08730836573132013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1992309498022162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258293810520347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868372656588477,0.0,0.0,0.20287171335555704,0.0,0.0,0.2235183626693764,0.0,0.0,0.07845602892429493,0.0,0.09984617996308677,0.3930843930199983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161011352905062,0.1108946336833236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15190200108337829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298308187192096,0.0,0.0,0.07929678250502095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13108669201149198,0.12643088062651073,0.0,0.0,0.11505541347925324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06698164638351606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08140238077246201,0.17457141470318316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008312248970791,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,my-dog-says-hi,2020/04/06,"I heard voices yesterday and I’m so scared Yesterday I was having a really bad day. I’m in a psychiatric facility but we are in lockdown so no visitors are allowed. I already felt trapped and alone. Now I feel it tenfold... My best friend lives halfway across the world and he said that we could talk but he hasn’t been on much at all the last couple days. That’s fine, and he’s allowed to be busy or have a life or take some space but it hurts. And I just want a hug... I don’t know. Sorry. My thoughts are all over the place at the moment.

Sometimes he sends a voice message when I’m panicking to help calm me down because it’s nice to hear his voice. Yesterday I started hearing his voice when I sent him a message. He told me I was selfish and horrible and didn’t deserve to be alive, and he kept getting angry and yelling at me when I was apologising. He’s never said anything like that before and I think I heard voices but I’m confused and scared because it sounded exactly like him, and it felt so real. 

I’m so scared that I’m going crazy because I’ve been locked in here for so long. It really hurt to hear him say those things. I miss him so much. I don’t know",1.098857142857142,3.1875281102040844,2.77730612244898,92.60555102040821,82.18367346938777,5.879183673469387,23.269387755102038,7.087006719466742,0.7622130612244904,917,33,202,12,25,302,127,245,0.24100000000000002,0.655,0.10300000000000001,-0.9908,2,3,0,0,1,0,24.0,2,0,0,1,12,17,0,4,10,0,17,2,0,2,4,40,46,27,0,2,7,0,3,2,1,0,1,15,0,0,12,14,0,1,7,0,0,3,6,9,0,0,16,18,27,8,16,27,6,30,0,3,0,1,31,13,0,4,16,120,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787761951734206,0.13625214721375206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160523891913796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030922411567908,0.2257983851851809,0.0,0.10506382352206456,0.0,0.12957408277996027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858069891045616,0.13661713831844752,0.0,0.1592557916101566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062430110672572016,0.0,0.2371010069237294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539256806779098,0.0,0.06450794673990327,0.0,0.0701708113147074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4174787820348346,0.0,0.0827592970231914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2643542452811798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571169816876158,0.10064447904624907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721046887729235,0.12064235031409815,0.0,0.10902621761318833,0.10926701004332974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815292226009245,0.0,0.09522762811481758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289998063105735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405358208209273,0.1581960082361287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348963713527694,0.09818825067476246,0.3708448432981247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12211492611942322,0.13821448731966696,0.08739265784118137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283402759534856,0.09924045946574893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202794069382241,0.07911455097966752,0.0,0.09802133930237952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798081725542488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282576861859741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheKPeanuts,2020/04/06,"Making effort with people mentally drains me I’ve [24/f] always been terrible at responding to texts, answering phone calls, joining FaceTime group sessions, and being outgoing. I don’t know if it’s some deep rooted fear of rejection or what. I remember when I was younger, I was so so scared of going to peoples doors to ask if they wanted to come out and play, and the one time I mustered up all my mental strength to do it, the mum told me that my friend didn’t want to come outside to play. It sounds like a small thing, but I remember how badly that set me back. 

Now, I’m 24 years old and struggle tremendously with making effort with friends. Sometimes I doubt if my connections with friends is even real, because I act different with all of them. I adapt, and have done for years, and it’s tiring. I’m just at a stage in my life where I want to address what’s going on with me, and try to better myself. My flat mate has just messaged me asking if I want to renew our house contract for next year (which I don’t) and as a result I’ve been suffering from crippling stomach knots all morning and have been running on and off to the toilet. 

I don’t know if any of this makes sense at all? Or if my point is even clear? I just want to know if anyone else experiences this. It would really help to know I’m not alone. What have people done to overcome this?",4.483688888888889,5.076395916363642,5.129060606060605,85.50114646464647,69.83636363636364,8.147474747474746,27.641414141414145,8.167268648758528,1.6402080808080814,1067,34,221,14,18,344,153,275,0.083,0.7809999999999999,0.136,0.8805,1,1,0,0,0,0,31.0,1,0,2,4,12,16,0,4,6,0,20,3,1,6,5,60,42,25,0,13,14,1,0,1,4,1,2,1,2,0,15,19,0,0,7,2,0,6,5,8,0,1,9,1,29,8,37,31,5,30,0,2,0,0,17,13,0,11,10,146,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11580720665497432,0.0,0.0,0.09303950994876807,0.0,0.0,0.07603842057095415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818404499912994,0.1145682631861923,0.0,0.0,0.2090649242079766,0.0,0.0,0.08597926984217485,0.09336132875502773,0.06816173242875011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889178331552592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114176196675606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19263842203971976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682346984754663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22885229523538494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340755921812573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14770625623534395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937708124620577,0.0,0.12582360059777334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259165291438911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270947281899862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494761827096245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290201528464003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458036478102551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897864246980411,0.054627438510739056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22391327974093736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22536758651828445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891712510633312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173316292310312,0.0,0.07576912269815035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23255650791053775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570185376189713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272705959468415,0.07163191607312057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533304828425529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194688996884593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058845588575518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689390945430073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428529491920369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652005569078512,0.12851554670131732,0.0,0.10684456699140264,0.0,0.07591543091707728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3297585952903008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943057137409829,0.0,0.0,0.21601667935717025
mentalhealth,fineapplemcgee,2020/04/06,"I’m so tired of being scared all the time I normally have death anxiety in general, but it is at an all time high in quarantine. I’m having trouble falling asleep because I’m afraid of dying in my sleep. I live with my sister, and she works for Amazon so she still has to go to work so technically we aren’t ‘quarantining’, and I am so terrified of her getting sick and dying. I don’t know how to not be afraid and it is at a level where I feel crippled by it. Worst of all, I can’t even tell myself that we’ll be okay, because the illogical, superstitious part of my brain thinks that that type of cockiness means that karma will make sure we die. I just feel like I’m so scared of dying or losing my sister that I can’t enjoy my life anymore. 

I also do this weird thing where I assume how long I’m going to live and I count how many years I have left. Or if someone older than me tells me how old they are, I always do the math on how many years I would have left to live if I lived to be as old as they are. I feel like I constantly have this timer in my head for how long until I die. 

I don’t know how to stop and it is a miserable way to exist.",4.990664615384618,3.639965808000003,6.353200000000001,83.76536923076924,68.92,9.612307692307693,27.23076923076923,8.617729084823388,1.5599846153846155,892,20,210,12,13,306,127,250,0.213,0.72,0.067,-0.9917,1,1,0,0,0,1,17.0,3,0,2,3,18,14,0,5,6,1,26,7,4,8,4,40,42,27,6,4,7,2,3,2,0,3,3,0,0,0,12,9,0,1,8,0,0,3,6,9,0,0,0,3,36,5,30,35,5,30,1,2,0,0,12,13,0,5,15,144,48,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08069037300653474,0.08395758990307436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07718887380056008,0.0,0.1000665299806212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12301644283137927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1126387181181687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903797278256833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5235957587083451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666440595718638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15305550393528347,0.1441671742944855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052716529410457735,0.0,0.1146885562283516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355338163147047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660728749087252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090493635927824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192581367421195,0.0,0.07126925409680905,0.09859011687541178,0.0,0.3563891953027445,0.17858815354229365,0.0,0.11288224131483775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06735210064589306,0.20459524905065302,0.0,0.10991060536094467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886140937310893,0.0,0.0,0.2117569367049084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092657874493832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020387055801212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097371903177414,0.0,0.08549296246847056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057954886533925,0.08435762834408457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509785667778983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638357994919085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703404102289144,0.0646531902546966,0.0,0.0,0.11767219370213193,0.11597068355218125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009039790014075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14691404052957865,0.0,0.0,0.07167706860091562,0.0,0.0,0.12995367801399552
mentalhealth,itissquidtime,2020/04/06,Thoughts I’m close to losing it. I have been fine for so long. It’s been 3 years since I went to a metal hospital and I’ve felt a million times better since then. But I can feel myself slipping back. I thought once I found the right balance I would be okay. I thought I was getting better. But I can’t stop my brain. It keeps thinking and thinking. It thinks of bad things. It thinks of different ways I could hurt myself. It thinks of different ways to self destruct. It thinks everyone is out to get me. I can’t make it stop. I have no one to talk to. I am close to ending everything. I can’t think if I’m dead.,-0.7993319838056651,1.3589721923076965,1.0568825910931174,99.67180161943321,96.30769230769228,4.275303643724697,18.380566801619434,6.05967700443912,-0.2823076923076924,475,15,111,5,19,154,77,130,0.187,0.738,0.075,-0.9359999999999999,2,0,0,0,0,2,16.0,0,0,0,3,2,8,1,0,3,1,14,1,1,1,0,27,34,7,1,3,3,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,9,5,0,3,13,0,0,1,4,4,0,2,9,2,18,4,12,22,0,15,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,1,8,67,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803465094265837,0.1064517678836152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22551532424572995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232493842890148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179320539030867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2664071958144628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292142097857047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12182552665716707,0.11458295935040147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446455694136667,0.0,0.12241377755882513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13979006943744884,0.0,0.0,0.13322020931838982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648445528951794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332210290496005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282775754946325,0.0,0.1426326427827061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510291787436185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577644308024098,0.08639291203076736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887877365202772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330035517755623,0.0,0.0,0.21092792255843934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213180591197502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247446594593064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847010328297102,0.5718489195522234,0.0,0.3036468528176136,0.0743424996451033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023968514614178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11818777488549892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056774212120552,0.0,0.0,0.08210164999635165
mentalhealth,Sharhino,2020/04/06,"COVID-19 Talk TW COVID-19 and impending death
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I was journaling just now and this is what I wrote:

I am not well, this is bad. Really bad. This virus shit is literally driving me crazy and I don't know how much more I can take. Germs. There are germs everywhere. I touch a surface - BOOM - got COVID-19. I wash my hands and wash them and wash them and wash them. Sanitize, disinfect. I touch my face when I'm lying in bed. I am touching my face for the majority of the time I'm in my bed. Which, I'm in my bed all day and night unless I'm working. I've been as careful as possible, but I think I have the virus. If I am hospitalized, I will refuse a ventilator and I will sign a DNR upon admission. I'm not suicidal, but I cannot live like this any longer. There is no end in sight. I have constant anxiety and I obsess all day and night. If I contract this virus, I will not survive. I don't wanna leave my family, but I'm ready to go.",0.7480102040816305,2.749539209183677,2.8615918367346938,92.00126530612246,82.92857142857143,6.98122448979592,22.044897959183675,8.07648339933343,1.0297334693877556,719,24,168,15,20,243,103,196,0.14800000000000002,0.794,0.057999999999999996,-0.9138,0,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,3,2,7,7,1,1,6,0,19,8,4,1,2,29,32,20,2,3,10,0,4,1,0,3,4,1,3,0,7,10,0,1,2,0,0,2,7,4,1,0,4,6,30,3,12,25,5,17,0,0,1,0,6,6,1,2,10,104,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13858192566141034,0.0,0.1558962469198116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3403067192619199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077740946113225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22022099677821225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26285109023814474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804945050307905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19211193858670386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581666243018868,0.0,0.16298681852222033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199582590079572,0.0,0.0,0.21578066204531451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955987467814796,0.0,0.17994736564632485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498066525189179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3824799751103715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297388540960217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055096086545415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091840911581136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22290954415132933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532222163974297,0.16379600831196964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305782713988322,0.0,0.0,0.11882964773124048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18322869266208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14835912490162684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Inuseaha,2020/04/06,"I’m at my breaking point Trigger warning, loss, bpd, and depression mentioned.

I don’t even know where to start.
About two years ago I had a mental breakdown, became an inpatient, got properly diagnosed, and put on new meds. I never really went back to normal after and I don’t know why. I didn’t handle things the same anymore, I didn’t have the same capacity. I never found my match with the right meds because I have bpd. They tried a lot of combinations. 
A year after the breakdown my fiancé and I moved out our toxic environment and bought a house. I really thought that would be the saving grace. Right after we got our house his mom got evicted from her apartment and hadn’t told anyone, and she left her dog in the apartment. The landlord called us and we went to get her dog. She told us she would call shelters, and friends to try to find her a home because her dog and my oldest dog didn’t get along. A couple months pass and her dog had gotten out with mine and while trying to round her up they got in a fight, I broke it up and got bit by her dog. I know That’s what happens when you get between dogs, can’t be mad. We told her what happened, and found out she hadn’t been calling anyone and was just hoping we’d keep her dog. When we started calling shelters all of them in our area were full, and no one was able to take her. So we were just trying to hang in there until we found somewhere. Fast forward to a couple days ago, I was home alone letting my dogs out and her dog slipped out with them. I ran out to get her, she attacked my oldest dog again. My neighbor was trying to spray them with the hose. I had to get in between them. Her dog bit up my face, arm, and leg, but I finally got them apart. My dog almost didn’t make it. I asked animal control to take his moms dog, they said they couldn’t and she’d have to stay with us because the shelter was full. I couldn’t really do much for the dogs the day after. I couldn’t really walk or use my arm. I felt pretty worthless. I couldn’t even protect my dog. His mom had tried to contact me but I don’t want to talk to her. She always tries to spin the story and say my dog instigates, and that she’s “trying” to find a home for hers. As life is, it doesn’t stop there. 
Unfortunately a day ago my dad passed away. It was really sudden. He just got out of the hospital and was doing better. None of us could go see him at home though because of the corona virus. Suddenly he declined. We all had to watch him go over a video conference call because none of us could be in the room. I feel like it only gets worse. What’s the point anymore? I feel really broken, and being in quarantine is so hard, I can’t even be with my family. I don’t even know how to process any of the feelings I have right now.",2.1019512195121948,3.7382592996515696,3.3277003484320566,92.06904181184672,77.08362369337979,6.218815331010452,21.470383275261323,6.956979308442209,0.3732278745644604,2154,56,477,22,49,698,241,574,0.068,0.892,0.04,-0.9059999999999999,1,2,0,0,1,0,64.0,16,1,9,3,20,13,3,0,29,0,52,6,4,5,4,91,102,35,0,11,6,4,6,1,2,2,2,2,7,0,12,44,0,4,14,1,1,12,22,7,0,2,42,10,98,6,70,44,12,82,0,4,3,0,78,37,0,4,34,320,110,0,0.05446072646389034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448284441141078,0.0,0.05453455071794741,0.05640488812085118,0.0,0.0,0.04531568717579172,0.0,0.0,0.03703516153333168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802081323686896,0.0761604124370285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091342758606564,0.06195693855842081,0.05116764525031296,0.04187693699070874,0.0,0.16599376683099976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816608685331847,0.11891401618815856,0.0,0.13718275698632004,0.0,0.27805245396941924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06108233561881896,0.08696491714354318,0.12051951594544427,0.0,0.10536798943716193,0.0,0.04690694390126453,0.05527649097156268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438831847922219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05134072602962315,0.0,0.08261093898564244,0.03890675386757094,0.052290837987723306,0.05965906382191294,0.09955223469749444,0.0,0.0,0.17914012668386733,0.042076222170328574,0.0,0.17072089076274813,0.0,0.0619025717947255,0.0,0.304900526246517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631888110541408,0.0,0.04878611373480207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185141963979928,0.054091789700413964,0.0,0.12568073260445467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048407196000334315,0.0,0.0,0.11972076397405282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059171738652951875,0.055689782636435696,0.03846722169647166,0.02660676003270615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046300562105591234,0.0,0.0,0.03635295780911843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098717961889145,0.0,0.0548836029760332,0.0,0.0,0.191351233859976,0.043470032277839334,0.05788313341846816,0.040034900282459734,0.0,0.08400693929248318,0.052598508985092114,0.0,0.0,0.05335994882751679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03690399770661114,0.0414198365701121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296597954165894,0.0,0.0,0.055406137798360865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054748072249792716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093336155162162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395274884954254,0.05180462224803172,0.04330935557758794,0.0,0.0,0.04339814793769573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07709516499792472,0.05804788818027755,0.0,0.0455316059137169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189537715962142,0.04377346899602171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0361812867261844,0.0,0.0535073872385609,0.043235733490150814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15611867399822113,0.0,0.2958020669840599,0.0,0.0532002163021607,0.0,0.3275477418183689,0.0470365817970715,0.0,0.0,0.03212234749717024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009712781013937,0.049142334809539084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05550013297673182,0.07737467505074053,0.0,0.0,0.07014184455538001
mentalhealth,crazybitchneedshelp,2020/04/06,"I have imaginary people in my head and they won’t leave. Hi! I have no idea if this is the correct subreddit for this, but I wanna attempt to find out a little more about my broken brain. This is going to be incredibly hard to explain, but I’m going to try to do so without it turning into a novel.  If you have questions, please ask! I will not be offended. I know it sounds insane and creepy. 

Little background info: I (20f) am a pretty normal person in real life. When I was about 12 was diagnosed with depression, anxiety, OCD, and trichotillomania.  I am not currently depressed or on any medications. I have friends and family who love me. I’m in a happy relationship and have been in many before this one. I have no recollection of being abused. I was not neglected. I don’t actually see them and they don’t tell me to do bad things or hurt anyone. No one knows about this, they all assume I’m normal which is hilarious.

Ok here we go. So for as I can remember, I have had “imaginary friends”. The farthest I can remember them back to is around 5th grade. I made up a world in my mind, and there I am nothing like i am in real life. The real me doesn’t exist there. The “me”(let’s call her Sam) in my head is gorgeous, has a great body and incredible boyfriend named Ryan. I have created every single detail of their lives. Sam and Ryan were 15 and 17 when i met them, they’re now in their mid 20s. Ryan is 1 year and 4 months older than Sam. They have twin boys who are 1 and a half. They live in an apartment in Brooklyn.  They have friends, family. I sometimes find myself acting out their conversations or smiling about something they did. I have noticed that they tend to go away when I’m extremely happy or busy. They come back if I’m feeling lonely or just sad. It happens subconsciously. Over the years, they have grown and evolved with me, which is what makes them feel so real. 


I really hope that made some kind of sense. This is the first time I’ve EVER talked about it because I have been so scared to seek help. So is there anyone who can relate/ tell me some psychological disorders that may describe what I’m going through? I’m not looking for a diagnosis, I just want to do a little research on what’s going on in my head. Thanks in advance :)",2.411276190476194,4.5128651244444455,3.928571428571427,85.98,77.75555555555556,6.863492063492062,23.380952380952376,7.8761006319780495,1.2048285714285716,1766,57,358,29,42,585,228,450,0.10800000000000001,0.711,0.182,0.9913,1,2,1,0,1,0,60.0,1,1,17,3,24,22,1,1,16,1,51,10,5,3,3,73,84,32,0,8,17,0,3,1,3,3,4,1,0,2,22,21,0,1,14,1,0,10,12,9,0,4,11,6,56,13,50,67,5,53,0,6,2,1,42,29,0,14,15,252,78,2,0.0,0.09649878089726037,0.07947838518223922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055385263088249884,0.0,0.062305056080836814,0.0,0.0,0.1138962084973786,0.0,0.0,0.07250314745197116,0.07613990232068878,0.0,0.07652007920214632,0.1252520619073329,0.0680030136941193,0.04964799971870122,0.0,0.06930353389894138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046682255546293,0.0,0.0909193424347532,0.08316425622482977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015749147248042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402965895693018,0.0826647668945608,0.0,0.0,0.09334280734124603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367149268580131,0.06862076440056326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15355783534159914,0.0,0.08236188530493786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148878160144693,0.06927691306281919,0.0,0.0,0.1887721725662735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777217716416199,0.0,0.0,0.08979318962099449,0.0,0.0,0.07202137576189635,0.17339902761533546,0.07295855161380793,0.0,0.2507576130691876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545907387950219,0.0,0.0,0.08089307240567617,0.0,0.0,0.08718835268414614,0.09194127604197724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481223567208299,0.0895198742938044,0.0,0.0,0.08623829319514488,0.0,0.08328283541764721,0.11505375463345285,0.03978981981788039,0.24488728528309364,0.14383451724735932,0.0,0.068393127292515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735071200818167,0.1541300953548536,0.054365042541585626,0.08257225321689572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204707679715377,0.0,0.0,0.08223603994328918,0.0,0.06500846964029046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595972412069944,0.07814849096476326,0.09272545503777156,0.0,0.0,0.11037822098598288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05646357581161145,0.07111446588313157,0.0,0.08940194303718463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08285865085006378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123682577601673,0.0,0.0,0.3708080934341118,0.052175630259483616,0.0,0.0,0.08744124516563251,0.1845221841163251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154046212796144,0.0,0.06490096820311715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06270019312240058,0.0805509987946217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.065462252525834,0.14237270605693642,0.0749834378165338,0.0,0.0,0.05410831224261317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047491123181235134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05529567923990116,0.08858856489709208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048038258603024124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850988966252731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489557364826137
mentalhealth,BeginningGlove,2020/04/06,"I feel utterly alone and hopeless tonight and my mind is going to the darkest places I’ve been doing well, being holed up at home but today was different. I went out for a run today and I’ve been spiralling down ever since. I wish I could speak to my therapist because I haven’t felt this low in a while. I’m feeling really alone tonight and my most awful demons are coming out to play

I feel utterly alone. I’ve felt alone most of my life, but I was working on it. With quarantine, I’ve lost another year to loneliness, it seems like. I’m turning 28 this August. I’ve wasted so much of my life. I want to get there and change that, but it’s feeling really pointless. Working towards a university degree, and working on my fitness and appearance were the things I called my own, that motivated me, but that all just seems trivial and silly. 

My brain is consumed with awful thoughts of what I did wrong, what I could’ve done, what I didn’t do. My chest feels heavy with regret, panic and I’m overcome with hopelessness tonight. I’m not that young. I’m in my late 20s and I feel like a failure. There’s no going up from here. I want to give it all up already, I want out of my body, weirdly enough - and I’ve never felt such a strong urge for this before. 

I needed to share this somewhere.",2.7463009404388714,4.481223590038319,3.865936955764543,88.47616771159876,75.55172413793103,6.737791710205504,25.27359804946012,7.520522993642371,1.1931593869731798,1011,35,209,13,22,328,135,261,0.24,0.6459999999999999,0.113,-0.9918,1,5,0,0,0,2,31.0,0,0,0,6,8,15,0,1,7,2,16,5,3,1,4,53,47,17,0,7,6,0,9,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,16,19,0,0,13,1,0,6,5,8,1,0,14,10,28,7,31,31,7,34,1,5,0,0,4,16,0,5,14,132,44,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4367787897848732,0.11634570652439755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055357369379154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06426974594199622,0.0,0.08971399737761689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171100494433244,0.0,0.11769584016682726,0.10765681697769534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153199564467477,0.09081945251392773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683561147320886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015293273263944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789249589860092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089383843071382,0.0,0.0,0.09536835612534413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198544235725754,0.07531991213388091,0.3036908195462529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05508333478310679,0.10113900158881488,0.11983770952236145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10575586779048064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189307360414095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893803621215096,0.10301650117878612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509036747777845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645523333017998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775039002695347,0.07817573467508547,0.08131487026241001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12370053694137274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015293273263944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508356913228986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919608063013154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721359494056803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241349217494962,0.07004365736557659,0.0,0.0,0.08370042020484204,0.0,0.0,0.19987247986716394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114678629382072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865577682930893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947951114574551,0.0977355733727965,0.0,0.0,0.12124042214161568,0.0,0.0,0.23026502415837144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527222419936375,0.0,0.067894093488265
mentalhealth,Philtuck1993,2020/04/06,"Numb. I have so much good in my life. So many things that should bring me happiness. A fiancé who I love dearly. A 3 month old daughter. 3 other step kids ( not married yet but we should have been but Covid kinda messed that up) who I treat like my own, but I just feel lost. Days just seem to go by so quick for me and I feel like nothing matters anymore. Life just seems like a joke nowadays. I would never kill myself because I don’t have the balls to do it and I think about my daughter and step kids and how they would react to that but I constantly wish something would happen to me on it’s own. It’s fucked it really is. I fake every thing in my life. I’m the funny guy who makes people laugh but it’s all for show but I’m so good at it. I can fool anyone into thinking my life is great. I’ve never been one to reach out to someone about my problems I just keep everything inside.  To be honest I dont even know why I’m posting this. I’m not looking for sympathy. I’ve been a reddit user for a while and just happen to search for a mental health sub reddit and felt the need to type what is wrong with me.  I’m really hoping I can over come this because I have so much to live for.",0.3221045751633973,2.326121733333334,2.1607843137254896,96.39241830065365,84.6078431372549,4.718954248366012,16.895424836601308,5.82211442006289,-0.5927908496732024,922,19,212,6,27,304,136,255,0.11599999999999999,0.6679999999999999,0.21600000000000005,0.983,0,0,1,0,0,1,21.0,1,0,1,1,16,23,2,0,9,0,21,8,0,3,3,50,48,19,1,9,13,2,3,3,0,5,6,0,0,3,18,11,0,1,8,3,0,5,6,9,0,1,5,4,28,14,28,37,5,23,0,1,1,2,11,8,1,4,12,141,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842487022287992,0.08349582537578698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455852049672121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10286308445332157,0.0,0.129042225993469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701102593614312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995027387016162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788706684188236,0.0,0.10060997529473194,0.0,0.1073200353128539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207568484283647,0.08530813904274531,0.1146544914258834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039470583716963,0.0,0.0,0.06786473654089073,0.20031466853143987,0.0,0.13165243302549512,0.0,0.11823690671049998,0.21119172598542246,0.12711656622383996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269296434102335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186033132586794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10613909916827928,0.1321119680868543,0.0,0.0656258526100974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3373776294203689,0.1750163885740358,0.0,0.10544320915978993,0.0,0.10027621970315603,0.0,0.13035258264538668,0.0,0.10777422256983436,0.0,0.07970860766105198,0.1210652843749732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12033946727559724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531372291743613,0.0,0.1755634947846522,0.0885426742343616,0.1841961856317169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114579279522291,0.0,0.12530307462909834,0.0,0.08091683460163439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08278542241671416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436393197686832,0.0,0.0,0.11426140134037968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299709693559246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21741686482058215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117761640439484,0.09192938808137006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586643927832511,0.15302910307553122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775098701594754,0.0,0.1373182004152342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544811201706626,0.1305585555156588,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mat623,2020/04/06,"Depressed in quarantine I am in my last semester of college and after having to stay home for a year due to health reasons i was so happy to be back at school. Now this virus has messed everything up, im forced to finish the semester at home with my family again. I was doing so well at school with a great group of friends and mentally i was feeling great. Now im extremely depressed everyday, i sleep most of the day and just listen to music or video chat with friends to distract myself. I was doing so well and it all just came to an end so fast.",4.821249999999999,5.1344136250000005,5.7160714285714285,82.57892857142858,69.0,9.257142857142858,29.392857142857146,9.23628265651192,2.320914285714286,434,15,89,8,7,143,69,112,0.11199999999999999,0.687,0.20199999999999999,0.9124,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,12,11,0,1,5,0,10,2,1,1,1,15,13,9,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,2,8,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,4,2,0,5,2,9,7,21,7,2,21,0,2,0,0,5,6,0,2,13,66,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337600580162833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835118470798356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347685870617752,0.0,0.2763903856761575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14211091441462978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442019502456499,0.0,0.1512578084184135,0.0,0.08112824878470247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479262622167822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3537929808077019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17080181444752618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705506531970767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3218884987758108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3466266727918225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13078801634189832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616956779978367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496913543022446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32476756295053666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16056569259587367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17101815709422993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885273106432065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332442201684312
mentalhealth,Kit_t10,2020/04/06,"I don't know if this is just anxiety any more. My fear of time and schedules is getting out of hand. Does anyone have any advice? Hello there, long time lurker first time poster here. Sorry for any wrong formatting or anything, I am on my phone. Please let me know so I can correct it. So without further ado... I would love to know if anyone else deals with something ike this and how.
So, I have extreme anxiety and mild (mostly seasonal) depression. I am not on medication as a personal choice, not because I don't believe in it, I just know that I am young (19) and still developing chemically upstairs. I do take CBD oil and it has helped me a lot! (Not here to preach this is just what works for me) The main cause of my anxiety has always been Time and Schedules. It doesn't matter what it is or how early I have to get up I am an hour early or I feel my whole world crumble. I have been managing this a lot better with the help of my absolutely wonderful boyfriend (bless his heart), however it's schedules that really have a grip on me. I am obsessed with having a set and regular schedule. If something happens to through it off for any reason at all I spiral into full blown panic attacks. It feels like there are angry bees buzzing in my head, I start uncontrollably crying, and I find it very hard to recollect myself. This can effect me for a while 12 hours if I can't find some way to occupy my mind (usually with an art project or puzzle works best). I should mention I have a really bad habit of working so hard and such long hours that it keeps my brain from wandering enough that I stop taking my CBD for months at a time. I recognize this is a really bad thing to do, especially since my episodes seem to get exponentially worse each time I am off it. I could really use some reassurance that I'm not just losing my mind, and a few tips would be great my appreciated if you've even managed to read this far. 
Thank you so much, and thank you to the moderators for having such a wonderful resource out here for people!",5.28300248138958,5.649717578163774,6.098288833746897,80.05235632754345,68.00744416873451,9.524923076923079,29.51950372208437,9.490545024520769,2.4257726848635235,1596,54,323,31,25,526,207,403,0.122,0.775,0.10300000000000001,-0.4608,1,0,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,2,0,8,20,19,1,4,16,0,38,6,4,6,2,72,60,29,0,9,18,0,6,1,0,3,1,0,0,1,26,19,0,2,14,2,0,0,9,10,0,1,2,7,46,9,43,52,15,45,2,2,0,1,12,17,0,18,27,230,72,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825200885281092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026620695084898,0.0,0.0,0.22970591306839105,0.0,0.19380389743326265,0.0,0.0,0.1180938353864598,0.08652536213349768,0.06949222878043981,0.0,0.0,0.09607002206319228,0.0,0.0,0.141018508182585,0.051477768956481526,0.0,0.0,0.09514222538089503,0.08862133390313415,0.07468601797251043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942701605311298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867497606701943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742361471609831,0.0,0.09276045433119327,0.0,0.0870605765747041,0.0727335991797311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07389965293333375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.070544168712933,0.0,0.0,0.0872557514528907,0.0,0.05577608036780737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502572792754882,0.08539731966181888,0.060328557049995124,0.0,0.0,0.15436504137160126,0.0718301028212976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235934605419514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931025035321606,0.0,0.0,0.07467571226242799,0.0,0.15129485516655922,0.0,0.08666641518149037,0.0,0.0,0.10006944370114924,0.11320534381147407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24948821310952066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750598802325317,0.0,0.0,0.1856382304229631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635221124639646,0.0,0.04125626738257762,0.0,0.0,0.14946489257564174,0.0,0.09447397118546416,0.0,0.1435866950988267,0.07621621345608344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08507090893588708,0.0,0.0,0.1705336725782341,0.0,0.06740434658632928,0.0,0.062077853472488335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907970798900764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05854453203664636,0.07373537836241352,0.0,0.09269683761690742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446929722361526,0.0,0.21639421969661304,0.08682500980672703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687687177414172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06985497179756366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002199779927584,0.0,0.0945308812396323,0.05977162828447586,0.0,0.06743903991425369,0.07060100912795733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12698643402432855,0.0,0.0,0.15549388129843486,0.0,0.0,0.05610246559845223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954484064363888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293461484964929,0.0930058284613451,0.06967716092063403,0.0,0.06702965723675514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942814398810464,0.0,0.08140335932454687,0.1831571343183325,0.18443405273581065,0.0,0.08605814172947142,0.1199766630213312,0.0923289307816778,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KS-15676,2020/04/06,"slipping into another severe depressive period, suicidal thoughts are becoming more severe by the day, please help most concerning, the fear of death that was always in the back of my mind is gone. If I had a gun I would have done it days ago. Despite the chaos in the world right now, things are going really well for me. I got a raise at work, I kinda like this social distancing stuff (I have autism, I hate being touched or people being close to me.) Most importantly corona isn't even bad in my country, and especially in my Provence. 1200 cases, over 700 of witch are recovered. 

out of 5.1 million people. 

Yet I'm sitting here freaking the fuck out, preparing to take myself out, printing off paperwork to buy a gun, tying a noose looking on google earth finding a cliff to jump off of. I'm just being irrational and paranoid.",6.129999999999996,6.920147,6.541917197452233,76.12370382165608,66.26114649681529,9.846878980891722,31.62356687898089,9.888512548439397,3.103925350318472,657,25,117,14,10,213,113,157,0.22699999999999998,0.674,0.099,-0.973,0,0,0,2,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,7,9,2,1,11,0,14,1,0,0,0,17,24,4,2,2,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,0,2,0,1,3,1,7,1,1,6,2,12,2,24,14,3,27,0,1,1,1,2,16,1,5,8,81,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15506431437932444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555523272084095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18342867612675468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13450987261150604,0.14605870066972482,0.0,0.19319572386966746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256299187572345,0.0,0.15066639305912066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17901345949708608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155391860538509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968441523054856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988225703233433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617193655485331,0.0,0.0,0.0994163810056182,0.0,0.13990698150938086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.172706517654152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725145613202075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546164451803773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14689659714224826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17662877701814422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425479716327233,0.0,0.0,0.1920198962959953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206422110352984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14938870933092266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3952407482852053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17831844322543405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2002522545761936,0.19134431701047536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13152510117509295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621528741558215,0.0,0.0,0.1388743643145517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15728249406111805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735065039342466,0.0,0.0,0.12426479146195595,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KingGarr3tt,2020/04/06,"I've been having a horrible 10 or so months Ever since I lost one of my closest friends to suicide and my girlfriend essentially broke all my trust and cheated on me, things have been spiralling out of control. I fell into a deep depression summer of last year, attempted taking my own life but ended up fucking up the process, had problems all  throughout, and eventually ended up in a relationship with someone emotionally unstable and it ended up with her taking her own life. Not to mention losing another friend to cancer it was a very rough part of my life and right at the beginning of sophomore year to boot. Now I'm having extreme trouble trusting anyone and have been hurting myself for about a month, not cutting but just trying to harm myself in any way I can, weather its burns or just general bruises and I cant really stop. I just feel very alone",6.789259259259263,7.489221259259263,7.1168888888888935,72.892,64.80246913580247,9.442962962962962,35.953086419753085,9.3871,3.5076523456790114,692,32,115,12,10,225,107,162,0.21600000000000005,0.6829999999999999,0.10099999999999999,-0.9709,0,1,0,0,0,2,10.0,0,0,0,4,7,15,3,0,7,0,11,5,0,1,3,28,18,12,1,1,9,0,2,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,4,11,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,11,0,1,6,2,15,4,24,12,5,28,0,5,0,1,7,13,1,2,13,86,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15376132727182965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095890237191298,0.1556748141014253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10380772386957753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16651218202028462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278696615277472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166999190919668,0.3944784363133856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342919149053724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506658878209789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294019537325332,0.13725025279564915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15893109278150358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101592709609706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31458821716850605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16609042938760432,0.1620632509953321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23700108562466865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060134605439328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16076932335376393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420575932498387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510823038191486,0.0,0.0,0.1593920772731416,0.0,0.12678529903292007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228088765099087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579093647160036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12412045110542362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16239277090669238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232491244820937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863121539220232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007956046552419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449925504475437,0.0,0.1178418183596958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19120866072851345
mentalhealth,throra83736e8,2020/04/06,Can someone nice please talk to me :( Hey my only freind wont talk to me and not ok if your a nice person and have some free time please talk to my I need good vibes really bad rn pretty please,-1.1085714285714268,0.971909571428572,0.6257142857142881,103.04428571428572,96.14285714285714,3.752380952380953,9.380952380952381,5.46131890053228,-1.815790476190476,150,1,37,1,6,48,32,42,0.14400000000000002,0.485,0.371,0.9115,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,6,4,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,3,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,2,1,18,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17620699674484194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770077394053317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648118754385862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16050307237561426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842692812813349,0.0,0.6949654300584929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21470039675435398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519564224971914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17881088079529076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.508870399609679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12305731368679693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Randomart920,2020/04/06,"I like feeling shitty Hello! I've never liked feeling energized or focused, or even aware for that matter. For the past 2-3 months I went through a serious eating disorder where I lost 20 pounds, and I would constantly feel unaware, confused, dazed, you name it, but I loved it. Everyday when I woke up I felt happy, like I was doing the right thing. I finally started to feel like I was acceptable in the eyes of others because I looked significantly better. Every time someone commented on my weight loss I would feel this indescribable feeling of happiness, but now I've upped my calories slightly from \~500 to \~1,200. However I constantly feel energy and awareness, and I hate it. I feel more aware of my body and it makes me anxious because I feel like people are always looking at me. I get terrible anxiety when eating in front of people, and prefer to eat alone. I have begun to crave those feelings of ""shittyness"" so much that I have resorted to messing up my sleep schedule (fall asleep at 3am, and wake up around 2am), but it's just not the same. I have already started to fall back on my old habits, but I don't know what else to do. I just want to feel numb again, although I wouldn't say I'm depressed. I also know this is bad for me especially because I am only 15, but I don't know what else to do. Does anyone else feel like this? What can I do?",5.2517275311611655,5.761339167286245,6.065934834900506,79.75627378088781,68.10780669144981,9.154690575114804,31.80865952328887,9.168548406835145,2.6822182812158326,1072,43,208,19,17,353,150,269,0.14400000000000002,0.675,0.18,0.9237,1,1,0,1,0,0,40.0,0,1,0,3,12,23,1,1,5,0,18,11,5,1,1,45,47,18,0,5,10,0,14,6,0,3,1,1,0,0,16,7,4,0,18,0,0,4,5,11,0,0,6,18,36,12,30,38,3,35,0,3,3,1,6,13,0,3,24,135,52,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393677716024998,0.1000885662302156,0.07253193170146104,0.07546880686963604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06938446203689637,0.10246401706682064,0.0,0.06341882707223351,0.09293181071729048,0.0,0.08074131055126446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974190764852943,0.07572984953151163,0.16586774661854056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021586635766817,0.0,0.10074610649662467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19602672537132826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811888797794747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394887477483562,0.0,0.07937127784427128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784230609391841,0.2273020478293103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059905812763847995,0.0,0.0764177921020779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5503214792212018,0.19438608194325874,0.08708523248997757,0.09935628578538874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04738646716167397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931014753152823,0.0,0.0895464531389695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14953734199582755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658656054198921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523285794993989,0.0,0.09900863737798443,0.0,0.08185935947383056,0.0,0.06054226522911496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239505069991878,0.0,0.06667417721685037,0.0,0.06995263530462931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951733093930992,0.0,0.0,0.06898065198824968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658242747224737,0.12575848827694552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745642284549299,0.0,0.07212745950544605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907644694102732,0.0,0.07684894100336467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12839439232688746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06025636397481444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05288729744794286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05349660107898215,0.0,0.0,0.11044690821505636,0.0,0.08407885173244377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885988874785634,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymousstarcatcher,2020/04/06,"My emotions are gone? Not a throwaway, just made a new anonymous account for more personal stuff like this.

So, I’m confused and a bit concerned. I had all of this stress, anxiety, and disappointment in myself balled up inside, like when you feel emotions physically in your gut. But then one minute, suddenly, it was all gone. I was just sitting there on the brink of crying, failing to hold it in, and now there are no feelings inside of me and the tears stopped. I couldn’t cry if I tried to. I’m not numb but I don’t feel anything really right now?

I’m not necessarily feeling numb in an empty, depressive kind of way. I’ve been there and this is not it. Not apathy... it’s not that I don’t care, it feels like I have nothing to care *with*. Anybody experience something similar?",1.4055314757481945,4.005932215686276,2.9753629170966636,88.07334365325079,86.3202614379085,6.096869625043,24.39250085999312,7.475848149327749,1.3744065359477124,611,25,122,11,19,200,96,153,0.20600000000000002,0.722,0.07200000000000001,-0.9456,0,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,0,1,9,13,0,2,6,0,11,3,1,1,2,29,24,11,0,2,11,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,10,6,0,2,5,1,1,2,10,7,0,1,7,5,12,6,15,16,4,19,0,3,0,0,3,8,0,2,10,83,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233728966203074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271339231239554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17606762317329874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.328855792250674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3543001795388319,0.0,0.0,0.13890362781038282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36281934562104107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15775529162441845,0.0,0.0,0.4077206971772957,0.11521298999795967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679403220524075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23636855348767796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15259978496465132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557578283254849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15474515718787993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928230952211204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408167843750079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331518889495878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772569488561068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415532431472202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348308952883511,0.18473691750618887,0.0,0.18461824215123326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949333083920047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801047474722524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DISCREETFEETSCHMEAT,2020/04/06,"I feel like I’m losing it My sleep schedule has been messed up recently as I’m sure most people’s have, but it’s starting to really effect me. I have dealt with depression and  ear suicidal experiences and have come out of that really dark place in my life. It’s just recently I feel like I’m losing it and I don’t know what to do. Sleep was a big controllable for me and regulating that helped me a lot. I just can’t seem to fall asleep anymore and the more I can’t the more anxious I get. I feel like a kid again. I’m actually scared of the dark right now and cry a lot at night and it’s scaring me.

I don’t know what to do, but I can feel it coming back and I’m scared.",0.9280175529168808,2.3748133557047018,3.2934228187919463,91.86462570986065,79.87248322147651,7.2691791430046475,20.186370676303557,8.139509932561175,0.6405638616417137,526,13,129,10,13,182,76,149,0.23800000000000002,0.698,0.064,-0.9833,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,4,5,11,0,3,7,0,13,5,4,2,1,29,29,11,1,0,4,0,4,3,0,0,1,1,0,1,10,12,0,1,8,0,0,3,4,7,0,0,2,5,16,4,13,27,5,18,0,3,0,0,2,7,0,4,11,79,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.12896330613076826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492964797727703,0.131061323802125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161832029065272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22767805433858065,0.0,0.0,0.14822202364971107,0.0,0.0,0.14516503733883515,0.0,0.0,0.11382410442941295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927203609586424,0.0,0.0,0.26728426864066457,0.2832326760332265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06904504565239003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858008555388296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14525683840793055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334432592123176,0.19369140561784284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29569319498415003,0.0,0.22470532411322852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401763970223507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916189904454414,0.0,0.1380728726613377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16932255888921127,0.0,0.26097239634289915,0.0,0.0,0.11285885130857196,0.0,0.0,0.3969278271824722,0.0,0.0,0.12030809941638375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644990145674278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935393289551959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445551000403179,0.0,0.12455364435390726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slightlyoffkilter_7,2020/04/06,"How do I stop hating myself for a diagnosis I have no control over? 23F diagnosed with ADHD-C 13 years ago. The older I've gotten, the more I've hated this part(?) of myself. There is no clear line between me and ADHD either. It colors every single thought and interaction in my life, just like the character Sadness touches and colors the ""core memories"" in the movie Inside Out. ADHD has made my life an anxiety-riddled disaster and I hate it/me for it. I don't feel I can be myself anywhere and I hate who I am and what I act like if I don't take my meds or stop actively policing/filtering my thoughts and actions. How could anyone possibly love the shitshow that is me? The real me isn't ever good enough for anyone....",1.915625000000002,4.2691009791666685,4.133166666666668,82.52850000000002,80.875,6.6177777777777775,24.18333333333333,7.793537801064563,1.5809533333333334,567,21,105,10,15,195,92,144,0.21600000000000005,0.6940000000000001,0.09,-0.9629,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,4,0,9,0,12,4,0,4,2,26,23,11,0,2,4,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,9,0,3,3,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,4,4,19,4,10,17,5,12,0,1,2,1,3,4,0,2,8,77,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4917882068330516,0.0,0.12091266312521387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19075172039866053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529870996285889,0.10890636636962688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844575433654255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14094033486040192,0.0,0.0,0.12338394894398412,0.11492506236307125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896924631848322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11440801821973558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5386772597481563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926903619022718,0.13327882788632228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310866008748815,0.12906742569408966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515125241579229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14771070915488246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537734217366643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525600608981646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280773405143128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255776975217533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21657683518358928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783879375611864
mentalhealth,yeet_that_post_away,2020/04/06,"I don't what these thoughts anymore. I want to feel 'normal' At a very young age I've been having these thoughts. Not suicidal anymore, but more murderous. I'm still young and this is not normal. I hate the thoughts and I don't like how they make me feel. I haven't been diagnosed with anything because insurance and my mother doesn't believe in mental illnesses. I'll always have an urge to kill someone. I always want to hurt people. Hell. I even wanted to kill my cat that I love dearly. I would get sudden bursts of anger and want to punch something. I always think about death and how 'good' it is. I'm currently lying in my bed crying because I don't want to feel this way anymore. I want to have a peaceful sleep without a thought of murder. I don't like how I feel. This isn't ok for an freshman in high school to think about a shooting. And how funny it is that I could die and others will die also. I want to be happy, productive, and know what I want to do with my life. Not upset, a large procrastinator, and have no idea what I even like anymore. I used to love so many things, but the moment I hit high school. It felt like I had no interests. Only death. All I want to do is to find out what's wrong with me and with these mood swings. I don't know. Help me please.",1.3986276223776208,3.446099276515156,2.6730303030303006,93.98339160839159,80.85606060606061,5.4251748251748255,20.38111888111888,6.490185161304077,0.09624580419580432,995,27,219,9,26,320,128,264,0.284,0.539,0.177,-0.9936,1,0,1,1,0,1,31.0,0,0,1,0,11,22,7,1,9,1,25,6,1,6,1,56,56,18,9,13,6,1,5,4,0,2,3,0,1,0,17,15,0,0,15,0,0,0,14,10,0,0,8,5,31,11,28,43,2,15,1,1,0,2,5,7,1,0,11,138,48,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710220457764514,0.2216933534150515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35230620001713303,0.0,0.0,0.07308380468673982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827660238128872,0.0,0.0,0.10005947340051777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090827817242645,0.0,0.09755460496760417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014119548317648,0.1843433884749958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731752558035995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17962184090121386,0.0,0.0852723927692045,0.0,0.08117155494973907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04640003045545425,0.0,0.0,0.07449037050366182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454085599009368,0.0,0.08768237857129406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05952807516616709,0.18766718680720149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507390679734536,0.1002566975993962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19651220797568592,0.0,0.09761629762580463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06272976612101168,0.17355408168119688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031061187535625,0.0,0.059281966323608215,0.09004031461437889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950050008110699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740316540971453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754469249989996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06157029670700634,0.0,0.0,0.09748770034239247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976274724290595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887503958759031,0.0,0.0752491885681136,0.06837097081865857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709245005931061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714471155729924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05900201663118788,0.1138128792016072,0.0,0.2820237418036688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767041040432813,0.0,0.07327829469880946,0.4714467360002141,0.07049395973739447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561053974130478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308871625718979,0.09710077893030494,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dezalien99,2020/04/06,How do I work with my boyfriend to come to a better understanding and conclusion? So I struggle with bipolar depression disorder and my downs make me extremely tired no matter how big or small they are. I get emotionally tired and my brain requires sleep so I sleep a lot after fights bad day etc so he's normally by himself trying to entertain himself. It's became an issue in our relationship. I've tried to figure coping skills in the past but I struggle with them because I get seriously tired. He knows why I do it and why I sleep so much. I understand where hes coming from and I personally would enjoy being able to do more in my day without needing to sleep so much. Itd honestly be helpful for any relationship I have with whoever not to be the person who can hangout for an hour without needing sleep.,3.6192495479204334,5.804012968354435,5.167124773960218,78.11797468354432,74.37974683544303,8.311754068716096,29.640144665461122,9.04235418022936,2.7874144665461134,651,29,118,15,14,219,97,158,0.155,0.741,0.10400000000000001,-0.6788,0,0,0,0,1,0,8.0,1,0,2,5,8,10,1,2,6,0,12,10,6,3,0,31,22,14,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,4,11,0,1,5,2,0,2,4,6,0,0,0,0,22,4,22,17,5,14,0,1,0,0,15,7,0,2,5,86,26,2,0.10647757184652283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07240840012715484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889043249206993,0.06490773950854922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941707594901539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886418442797082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18344199995448066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733845034253486,0.0,0.09170897660829573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12203252212032492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977293683797527,0.0,0.0,0.1187506386838598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11126027318019467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136967195783789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10485895999530777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113492126612133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058517288857778876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052342390991157,0.0,0.0,0.07107460601944965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654653354726752,0.1579035407035655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432541308048576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164489051589318,0.0,0.18594421740996034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286341280885963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5327723433775013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22262695370681088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3671409160619919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14458256382481655,0.0,0.0,0.2216938148509731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19215889412925752,0.0,0.0,0.20528115919807172,0.0,0.0775169404460288,0.0,0.0,0.07563861204898865,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lost_Cause_Exhibit,2020/04/06,"Mortaversary coming up, could use some support... The strongest, kindest, gentlest person I ever knew died 360 days ago. She was also my partner. Obviously it's worse that she's dead, but she happened to die a week before my birthday, so now my birthday is forever tainted by this dispare and hopelessness.

I've been socializing since, rebuilding my social circle, but I know in my heart that I can never love another person the way they deserve to be loved. So I couldn't even begin to date again, even though I know she wanted me not to be alone. 

Now that Miss. Rona is in town my state is on lockdown, so I cant see any of my friends like I was planning to, and I'm probably going to drink a lot. Please help me get through this most challenging time.

I've been through depression and anxiety before, this is a different kind if torment and it's kind of putting this post all over this place. I am in agony, please for help.",5.8194274234053225,6.147875563535916,6.147714716223002,80.29385735811151,66.84530386740332,9.233751883475641,33.029131089904574,9.095868883498916,2.7614486187845304,731,30,141,12,11,235,117,181,0.162,0.639,0.19899999999999998,0.7904,1,2,1,0,0,1,25.0,0,0,1,2,11,12,0,0,5,0,15,4,1,1,4,23,31,12,3,4,4,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,10,5,1,0,3,1,0,3,4,3,0,0,5,1,22,9,18,22,4,25,0,3,1,2,15,8,0,4,12,94,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633096860230688,0.0,0.0,0.13591878258044887,0.0,0.1049477334979566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924357863268023,0.13761022739935694,0.10039360402972154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22334083227799764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113046418086334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477962158203838,0.0,0.0,0.08463503385595421,0.0,0.11303159924666965,0.0,0.2724002187529043,0.1371115343953448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285592988067619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17335755784902568,0.11870861098946507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139101562833223,0.0,0.06856431657662382,0.0,0.07458327174509212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160497387328328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15551284942348276,0.17592668585890398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27331990501353115,0.1442454814739642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411427364783136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115704018541622,0.2368875070839992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101215703969485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22917682697832076,0.1371115343953448,0.2881109121262278,0.0,0.0,0.1256858370227167,0.0,0.14149238226840186,0.0,0.0,0.13192635561788246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10457645836119088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10855807036440428,0.0,0.0,0.267552947989381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14892271863307316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893667862515204,0.0,0.07652356510838748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334398750877595,0.0,0.0,0.07740517729752433,0.10416739223511293,0.10526794984947477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337385953339354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eagles20forever,2020/04/06,"Can not stop repeating the same word and hyperventilating I was wondering if anyone on this subreddit could give me a diagnosis on what is happening. 

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I got mad because of something that my parents had done and decided to go lay on the couch. I then repeated the word ""why"" over and over to myself. It felt like only a a couple of minutes had passed but I was later informed by my mom that I had been laying there for over 30 minutes. This of course scarred me because I was unaware of that much time passing so fast. She had informed me that my sister and her had come to me multiple times to try to talk to me. She told me I gave them no reaction and also didn't respond to being touched. Afterwards I went to my room and began to hyperventilate to the point of almost passing out. The only reason I stopped is because I broke out into tears before calming down because of fatigue.

​

Can anyone here tell me what that might be?",4.947683946488294,6.20339716304348,5.834347826086957,78.44275919732442,69.21739130434783,8.270234113712375,32.0886287625418,8.617729084823388,2.627120903010033,754,33,138,12,13,248,111,184,0.09699999999999999,0.866,0.037000000000000005,-0.8822,1,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,4,5,1,0,8,0,19,1,0,1,0,27,30,11,0,2,3,3,2,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,10,10,0,2,6,0,0,6,3,3,0,0,17,2,26,2,28,9,2,29,0,2,0,0,15,12,0,4,12,108,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373279816368105,0.0,0.0,0.10967247074917746,0.0,0.2971867698421178,0.33328527301913524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19178586020994032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.334402152955711,0.0,0.1166978079406668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11813575736834897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949679045036008,0.1517451015433634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403439611727238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316779022548768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155917836369888,0.07794100373783522,0.0,0.10968504846455494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127428723245465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700069231493651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14548607306578526,0.0,0.16061914501146834,0.0,0.0,0.1008152075783362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20860546134574032,0.0,0.0,0.1522800486711992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964359256250013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100489783422585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10557867230133253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22931383713611894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022960797010524,0.11986822152282167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993729785761998,0.0,0.0,0.13104513324574588,0.0,0.09311046916159164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12713208087721622,0.12374939489679147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14872473420766089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33328527301913524,0.0
mentalhealth,gabeywavey,2020/04/06,"Scroll past or dont, I honestly don't give a shiii Broken, seemingly alone, and very suicidal. Things wont get easier, part of me doesnt want them to. So for now let's laugh and you guys can do what you please with my death.",1.7418750000000005,3.170546104166668,3.3483333333333327,92.43000000000002,77.54166666666666,8.133333333333335,18.25,8.841846274778883,0.6932749999999999,175,3,42,4,4,58,42,48,0.293,0.56,0.14800000000000002,-0.8059999999999999,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,6,11,4,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,4,9,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935308496407491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.332158439593971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480718243474663,0.271875995469504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806238626714896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898094430851063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069091358503407,0.270550196293531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3111028484129009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580089504762843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100083022533195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882872954393195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23384576851820865,0.16716458923024075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meatclownnie,2020/04/06,"depression (w/ symptoms of psychosis I guess?) vent I need to work on a 4 page paper for my English class that was assigned like 3 weeks ago. BUT I was in a psych ward for 2 weeks for attempted suicide and got released on the day the paper was assigned. I’m stressed out cause I have no Idea what to do with the paper. I don’t have the book I need for certain “in-text citations”. I feel like Everytime I open my laptop I will have a panic attack —-> then a breakdown and cry and scream into my pillow —-> and then pass out. — In other news, I think I’m developing an ED , I’m not positive but I’ve brought it up to my therapist and he just blew it off. Haha.. god. I feel like utter shit. — being transgender really, REALLY, fucking sucks. My dysphoria is more physical symptoms rather then emotional/mental and I hate it. Constantly hot, anxious, heat flashes (I always sit in my room w a fan or walk around with no pants on) my chest starts to hurt, legs ache (used to s-h there and still would) , stomach twists and turns and I get a migraine and this lasts on and off for almost all day unless I’m sleeping. — please.. I don’t want to be here. I look in a mirror and I don’t know who it is. What is that? A person??? No way.. can’t be! That’s not Kyle! Kyle doesn’t look like that.. that’s not him.. an imposter I say! , what happened to me. that attempt really screwed my sense hm? god I feel fucking sick..",0.5175768061235182,2.753172256055361,2.442755583516832,93.14744468910558,85.95501730103805,5.579154870504352,20.868302401174365,6.980632752743323,0.4940417531718575,1078,35,236,15,33,358,163,289,0.23199999999999998,0.6920000000000001,0.076,-0.9953,0,0,0,0,0,1,60.0,0,0,0,3,6,18,7,2,14,2,20,12,5,2,2,45,46,19,1,5,9,0,4,4,0,2,4,2,2,1,16,19,0,0,6,1,0,3,11,12,1,0,5,8,29,6,31,36,3,34,0,2,2,3,5,17,5,3,16,141,45,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11301953831750318,0.0,0.12767111700044476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608878817575076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14403677298112916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135005063337225,0.0,0.14504770732581246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13097586141905904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13778035328309945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14005088103748095,0.16445169445097374,0.0,0.10981408747502094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19340089389021986,0.18216960293025464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23574022307393985,0.06661259248202879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197202703199132,0.0,0.1404537370397133,0.0,0.11274631382370813,0.0,0.0,0.12587816202474095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364895528516082,0.1439300464941299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006972397997427,0.10392812059737754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491568906990521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21413289906040192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890767280666432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959176835478916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132658607317088,0.0,0.13995483173555934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24503600164346304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139175495839146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308751590566792,0.0,0.0,0.1275903643976255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902439435278904,0.0,0.10182029642277167,0.0,0.1460488565970626,0.0,0.0,0.1394624317965279,0.0,0.0,0.2650390761231882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803533774162,0.0,0.08169575393642713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386815238312033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011758341925022,0.0,0.0,0.07520179283865427,0.10120220539380316,0.20454286996079885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282027118560372,0.0,0.0,0.09057112473857287,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ohhithere19,2020/04/06,"i give up I am trying my best. To give some background i have ptsd, painc disorder, and major depressive disorder. This whole covid thing is getting the best of me i was so anxious today i went to bed early at like 9 and now im back up and cant get back to sleep. I am so tired of fighting, i dont want to kill myself but i just want some hope. I feel like everything i have is stripped from me, i was in college and struggling with mh but i was free. Now i am stuck at home all day because of social isolation and the fact i dont drive and all of the places i like to go to cope when i am home are closed or are places of high risk exposure. I try to do what i can by limiting media and what not but its just hard. I just dont feel like doing a lot of the things i love, which is why my dr. upped my prozac to 40 mg a few days ago but im just so axnious and nothings helping anymore. Its got to the point were my chest hurts because of stress and anxienty and i just want to scream.",1.4047953374898334,2.4201328571428604,3.091461100569262,95.6336622390892,77.57142857142857,6.580536730821363,22.442125237191654,7.048011613610866,0.3646505285985362,758,21,190,8,17,252,117,217,0.17300000000000001,0.675,0.153,0.303,0,1,0,0,2,1,15.0,0,0,0,3,13,17,2,3,7,0,22,6,2,0,3,36,37,19,1,4,11,0,3,4,0,0,3,1,3,0,8,12,0,1,2,0,1,3,5,8,0,0,7,4,28,10,26,30,10,24,0,2,0,1,6,11,0,5,14,129,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638830938185194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284124712548518,0.10783734814292954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16722324885757278,0.0,0.13256947128556645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22822440867808616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14025203994887833,0.0,0.09365455208543193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2492428030867541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38231495743161503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772531723245892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996084082764436,0.15536269488097146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11362062292003992,0.20861983769283898,0.06179743500849795,0.0,0.08696647885998274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740650849987803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728837558426194,0.11488603809838265,0.21814306673910625,0.10799983786100124,0.0,0.0,0.11640462740780805,0.0,0.2349080681787413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030078031427925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21249256387734874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244384828033897,0.09813889884974004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433556424893717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272129108165416,0.0,0.10279109969634848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710710072099626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881498633583557,0.1108431255953438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245572454472082,0.11367495529150595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444793423058216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249765628828338,0.10306944812119928,0.0,0.0,0.14764983489251704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192406740872686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079978610400027,0.09811774062082182,0.121400372339743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,floodedmarathon,2020/04/06,"looking for advice? A little backstory; (Or just skip to the issue at hand below)

My dad wasn't the nicest of people and he mentally hurt me a lot to the point where I would be a stupid attention-seeking teenager (because I guess I just wanted, and I really still do want, attention from literally anybody) by slicing up my arms and posting it on social media or keeping it to myself or what have you, and I never stopped wearing hoodies blah blah blah, and my mental health got worse and worse until my dad decided that he'd take me to the hospital and get me sent to a mental hospital, which happened multiple times until finally I was put into DCFS care and put into a 6 month long in-patient hospital in Atlanta, GA, which really changed my perspective on things and when I got out I was sent to live with my grandmother (who I still live with) and started to get better and better, but I don't feel like I really got better because I've always been the fat, ugly, and anti-social kid in school and I really just still am, but I want to work better on myself, which here comes the issue at hand;

I need advice for this;

I don't shower often, and when I do it's only at nights before school or when I go to see my girlfriend, and I haven't showered in about 2 or 3 weeks due to the COVID-19 outbreak because of schools being force closed and I can't see my girlfriend because of the mandatory social distancing, and I'm 15 and only have my learner's permit. I don't brush my teeth and I work out with 100 jumping jacks, 30 pushups, and 30 situps every night because I don't want to be fat anymore, and I'm doing hella good and I've lost hella weight which has motivated me a bit, and I want to become a law enforcement officer later down the road, and I want to work on my social anxiety and I want to stop being the person that people don't want to be friends with because I'm weird, don't know when to shut up, and say stupid shit all the time and I never know how to act. I just don't have any motivation to do anything, and I know this, and I want to help myself get better but I just can't, I tried to start showering and working out more and brushing my teeth more but I just don't like getting up and doing things, I'm sad all the time and my depression has gotten better and I've stopped taking medication but it's only just sadness about my situation in life because I'm always secluded, there's no neighbors to hang out with, I live in the middle of no where so I can't walk or ride a bike anywhere, because I don't even have a bike, and my computer that I loved with all my heart got seized by police because I'm a fucking idiot, and sometimes I have thoughts about how much I want to just fucking end my life and I've thought of a sure-fire way to do so, but I don't want to do it because I don't want to leave my girlfriend because I love her so much and I know she loves me so much, that's my only motivation to live, but what if she leaves me? What the fuck do I do? I'll never find a girl like her again and if I fuck it up then that's it, I'm ending it. I just want to be normal and do things that normal people do, like take showers and brush my teeth n shit like that but I don't fucking want to, and I can't go back to therapy until this COVID-19 shit goes away, which won't be for a fucking while, and I don't know if I can handle it much longer. I only have 2 friends, one being my girlfriend, and one being a german guy who I talk to a lot about my feelings and he doesn't really help that much besides make me feel better in that moment and my girlfriend doesn't know how to deal with my sadness besides just asking if I'm okay or saying ""awh :/""

What the hell do I do?",7.228733015056921,4.770215791773783,7.851893499816381,78.35988946015429,65.24678663239075,10.588086669114947,33.79669482188763,8.676224119757912,2.5526454204921043,2898,90,621,33,35,974,276,778,0.13699999999999998,0.7340000000000001,0.129,-0.9309999999999999,4,1,0,0,0,1,68.0,0,1,0,15,36,40,13,0,30,1,59,27,13,8,6,145,131,81,0,22,29,2,6,8,8,2,6,2,5,4,35,61,3,4,17,2,0,12,27,20,0,2,14,14,92,20,82,105,13,84,1,6,3,9,39,34,10,15,41,415,127,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193593216391807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828383792206649,0.0,0.0,0.03198952463907146,0.0,0.035986271717458024,0.0,0.04665207769464395,0.0,0.0,0.03871077300711893,0.0,0.043977028283195135,0.0,0.044196611562906434,0.03617166098944805,0.0,0.3154336377397917,0.051953139890393824,0.040028465725664285,0.0,0.0,0.2912278793607015,0.05135663911386528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047961481897494544,0.0,0.04976318964125946,0.040521696150442106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048497253243961036,0.04051638431015255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332880912633031,0.0,0.0,0.031070167473931307,0.0,0.03963411043197595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135609941270595,0.033606132927293995,0.0,0.0515311669521787,0.04299466416345929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268759147305845,0.2609321361687075,0.09830802072680764,0.0,0.05346902142892099,0.03945579784937815,0.15049208825974034,0.0,0.051821016033052884,0.046578031690905006,0.04159824195118416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050002432554776086,0.0,0.05574386644444791,0.06306124360069912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050358413067126205,0.0,0.0,0.0981972615293454,0.0,0.041812243420820086,0.0,0.0,0.15511517313794848,0.0,0.0,0.09961935183378504,0.0,0.0,0.06645296444290706,0.11490939561126128,0.04714748659089192,0.16615242311305392,0.041629845743684515,0.039502631362081965,0.0,0.05135085900305402,0.0799852308432163,0.12736914286699458,0.0,0.0314002637329203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0473889052505587,0.14221893171191094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03754771441624859,0.0,0.17290290847737844,0.034880339829791315,0.10884286485147072,0.0,0.0,0.08828967074421118,0.09218047536912596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06375246090682693,0.17888417758262135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783701560237726,0.041074427234154894,0.0,0.0,0.04446899383130238,0.0,0.045052319077982336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945784888557961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15067849430320138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481785632848688,0.0,0.14282415098975018,0.07497124706711633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14486087430810513,0.0,0.052876107064538436,0.0,0.14385726827232448,0.0,0.0,0.046524797698199234,0.0,0.06659178948186244,0.0,0.11270112119386475,0.11798526337646373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044335629497550655,0.0,0.10610703762352744,0.03780981119052507,0.0,0.0,0.05379553619405136,0.0,0.0937559428889412,0.0,0.0,0.07469067256675654,0.08229003730049655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031937782631103605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38844439118242,0.03733899302949646,0.037733489927320917,0.05728332154923416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369857680594557,0.0,0.09587769016387432,0.033416609669005344,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_did_a_thing_once,2020/04/06,corona makes me depressed All the time alone leads to the invasive thoughts in my head to run unchecked. It's like a never ending loop. Doesn't help that i was sexually assaulted in october and never got proper help for that.,5.672015503875973,7.021778372093022,5.9162790697674446,78.17503875968997,67.6046511627907,9.454263565891472,30.6124031007752,9.725611199111238,2.923393798449613,182,7,33,4,3,58,37,43,0.271,0.677,0.051,-0.8663,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,3,0,2,1,1,2,3,7,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,3,0,3,1,5,2,1,8,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,20,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3255222881801332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27070802228277435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2783784572814803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513761795113502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3225647309731525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42134027575505656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15355217775362415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20979915752665973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4848184618841505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24952083703641825,0.18327213899991826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bumblebee-226,2020/04/06,"Covid and PTSD I’m a college student home from school due to the coronavirus, and living at home like I did in high school (which is when my trauma happened) is giving me very intruding flashbacks and I can’t make them go away",3.139666666666667,5.2192829111111125,3.4819444444444483,90.13625000000003,75.44444444444444,6.277777777777778,24.583333333333336,7.1686216300943375,0.9793333333333334,181,6,36,2,4,56,38,45,0.063,0.828,0.11,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,4,9,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,5,1,5,8,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,21,6,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23744102102103876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424343616524449,0.14362796820983156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22348159038189933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267015099016309,0.5070023610282697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346740283478012,0.0,0.2231585159697748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869416947185056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954189703680849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5115371373240657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085224534734491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,consensualcannibal,2020/04/06,"Is this a symptom of an illness or just a bad habit? I’m a senior in high school, and I’ve yet to get diagnosed with anything because finding a doctor is so difficult. I’m pretty sure I have at least depression, but that’s going off topic. Anyway, since freshman year I’ve been doing this really odd thing. I spend at least an hour or more every day kind of running/skipping around my house. About 90% of the time I do this listening to music that triggers vivid daydreams about imagined trailers for shows, edits, stage play choreography, fantasy lives and scenarios, compositions for art pieces, etc. Yeah, I’m an artist. These can even cause me to show emotions, mouth out phrases of make facial expressions that I imagine in the daydreams. The other few times, I might be watching something for an interest I’m very passionate about at the time and it makes me excited enough to get the urge to run and jump around. If I can’t find time to do this, or if I’m in a place where it’s inappropriate to, it does make me feel uncomfortable and antsy, but it’s not debilitating either. Sometimes I will be doing something at home (like drawing) and a song will come on that triggers that urge, so I put down what I’m doing to satisfy it. My brother does it too, though not as often, and the rest of my family makes fun of us for it. I’ve only heard of a few other people who do this online. Is it just a weird thing that I’ve conditioned myself into doing or is it apart of a bigger problem?",6.581479591836736,6.088408397959185,7.108903061224492,76.82315051020413,65.36054421768708,9.935034013605444,32.320578231292515,9.354420925462401,2.7317557823129244,1175,41,227,19,16,387,167,294,0.071,0.826,0.10400000000000001,0.9148,0,0,2,0,0,0,35.0,1,0,0,0,16,13,0,0,19,1,20,7,2,7,1,42,37,19,0,3,13,1,1,1,0,3,4,3,1,0,27,13,0,0,5,7,1,5,3,5,0,0,2,6,16,8,39,30,10,34,0,1,2,1,6,19,0,8,10,159,43,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478260604347386,0.2267032631012518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631610934813857,0.07761982712637118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308040648025548,0.0,0.10968442617160576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211799435710727,0.0,0.10967004804311103,0.12923833693506614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13032872664868764,0.2228565224042006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323029460233944,0.0,0.13156701389449454,0.14200778082208987,0.08410095860206641,0.0,0.10728190259888483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003638314380105,0.0,0.0643824054885662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327565484772277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330504379857823,0.0,0.0723651708903664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453224682809825,0.12772342655446176,0.0,0.1253954368017211,0.14692293759146774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325956958662411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622075200038719,0.0,0.11243565125283098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33997786236742905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13507812364062707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968410023928151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827531860831801,0.0,0.13303384774364488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12954145567487413,0.0,0.12183861981380045,0.0,0.12800287579043534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157153206365916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288658219586613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10532956157109696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19605132849360776,0.12593366574121925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12000800910064335,0.13234571665654266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16918618539184982,0.0,0.12510211156510934,0.0,0.2969910403037764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15316357704840647,0.0,0.0,0.1050614526415873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199702242820361
mentalhealth,LillyCheyenne,2020/04/06,"Social distancing and getting help Hi, new person here. Ive been seeing a psychiatrist for several months now for general anxiety and PTSD. My dr finally said we could discuss medication to help handle the anxiety, and it could be discussed at our next appointment, since we were having a phone appointment and he did not want to discuss medication without being face to face. Due to COVID-19, my insurance has moved all in person appointments to phone appointments. This is supposed to go until the end of the crisis, which is going to be at least 2 months. The anxiety levels are so high that I haven't been able to sleep or hold down food well. Is anyone else having similar issues, and were you able to get help?",7.301363636363636,7.974470499999999,7.561666666666664,70.23750000000001,63.6969696969697,11.44848484848485,33.92424242424242,11.20814326018867,4.11099696969697,574,23,96,16,8,187,91,132,0.076,0.85,0.07400000000000001,0.1969,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,3,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,6,0,19,7,3,0,1,16,26,8,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,4,7,1,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,6,2,8,1,18,15,2,18,0,0,1,0,18,6,0,1,9,67,12,0,0.2887444478726709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3313330684414272,0.0,0.0,0.10094841579769204,0.1479264045428688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23053894627676616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206044676596591,0.0,0.12787093846124836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15815271446370047,0.0,0.0,0.17457546625331602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15085705652587605,0.0,0.16410012384445133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903089754059673,0.1525371811738662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506870927081856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908796537751256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304730635092465,0.15344482607239382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13943559351798296,0.1535414980234633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25212051448987005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16876340390953404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13733104587007447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11504597054241453,0.0,0.0,0.16309951912831774,0.0,0.1194261955415335,0.0,0.14447648782985406,0.14716930108022053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515447823299138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12980796772583722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13916967193980193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VanePollo,2020/04/06,"Have I been lied to? It was November of 2018 after a panic attack at 3 am that I got sent to the ER and subsequently admitted into a mental health program in the hospital. Two weeks go by and I've learned much about myself and self therapy. I get sent home and everything is good and I'm really happy.

A few months go by and my situation starts declining again. The amount of pills I have to take increases as well as the dosages. I feel like I'm going insane and some things in life hit me really hard from losing friends to barely finishing high school. I was a mess. 

In the past year I had been told that I have anxiety, depression, body dysmorphic disorder, potentially bipolar, etc.

I got sick and tired of the amount of medication I would take daily on top of other medical issues I have. 

Come February of this year I move states to live with my brother and his family. Everything is going fine and dandy when I get a panic attack after talking to my mom. My brother and my sister and law stay with me through it and I calm down, but everything just feels ruined by then...

Ruined in a sense that I thought I could escape my life back in my old state... it feels impossible now.

A few days later, my brother... he tells me a lot of things that we feel and the things that happen to us are greatly impacted by the way we think. In addition, a lot of things that we think are true about us are only true because others tell us it is. An example: I got diagnosed with mental health issues, so therefore ""I am depressed and anxious"". Often times he tells me it's not true. I feel like I don't know what to believe. I feel like no has ever asked HOW I FEEL.

I've been through therapy, countless psychiatrist appointments, and even therapy groups. I don't feel particularly wrong, but it just feels empty. I feel like my therapist would be the only one to listen to me. 

I'm really frustrated. I feel empty, alone, and unheard. I feel as though no one I'm supposed to be close with validates my feelings. 

Anxiety is often correlated with paranoia right? I constantly feel this way. I'm always afraid of the worst possible outcome to any situation and I feel as though I'm just a disaster waiting to explode. I feel useless and tired. 

What can I do? I want to be happy and feel validated. I don't want to be stuck in an endless cycle of feeling nothing at all.",3.297812776304156,5.155705547413795,4.94439655172414,80.8043611847922,74.34482758620689,8.552077807250223,26.983642793987627,9.197007762596977,2.382871971706454,1850,70,358,44,39,625,222,464,0.168,0.7170000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.9796,0,1,0,0,1,0,57.0,6,0,0,2,18,30,3,3,22,0,32,13,1,2,5,81,85,32,0,5,6,5,19,4,1,2,12,1,1,1,22,32,0,1,24,0,0,9,6,15,2,3,14,20,55,15,57,63,12,50,0,6,0,0,27,16,0,5,24,242,77,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06260135371049792,0.0,0.0,0.0502939276370504,0.0,0.0,0.04110372919996028,0.0,0.09247839624249687,0.06828407753500007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05650661839981363,0.13752667028450294,0.0,0.04647740705115385,0.0,0.0368458651628242,0.0,0.0,0.06809925291515767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0671392274507314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05206682012575199,0.0,0.06531807212603598,0.0,0.048259306239937065,0.0,0.0,0.038981129687359936,0.0,0.10411998975514436,0.06134899435970589,0.0,0.0,0.06927361651429284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0674106054851663,0.03992243599912886,0.05467470796859798,0.0,0.0,0.16296846446577498,0.0,0.056980858521481374,0.0,0.5501179189345611,0.17272371538953332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046698585080829434,0.0,0.06315858562654893,0.0,0.13740599162995468,0.05069723443743828,0.1450268356366026,0.06663929616622262,0.0,0.0,0.0534500869158752,0.1286866989018468,0.05414560446480038,0.0,0.0,0.1284974672340396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06386199519112014,0.060629871608676875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261748554134516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033218228693109315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538622207782595,0.1181187837712986,0.0,0.053372817216036185,0.0,0.0,0.06762094151047825,0.0,0.10277399572734952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178116120690688,0.1218258898217399,0.0,0.0,0.07079082843637652,0.048245514831999216,0.06424199443916541,0.0444330099188743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057997276367233626,0.0,0.06342540360898412,0.0,0.08191631224631195,0.0919401819998673,0.0,0.1418351119304022,0.0,0.0,0.05770026746880218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814109127436957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11616517774444153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051618514816925566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117216278071513,0.0,0.0,0.06305587009982576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588230587673905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042782300029243055,0.06442484864671956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908921485995978,0.04858228616435235,0.15849114445584495,0.0,0.2073676158212958,0.07017969280381653,0.16062420144820838,0.07745965256811388,0.11877108478502504,0.04798547670816492,0.035245156523551466,0.1389420819088828,0.0,0.057756461998096975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05904462661234161,0.0,0.2181186708362588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130241738529439,0.09595465236823697,0.048484220045198125,0.0,0.05434606662376664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587481621642745,0.06608560167176968,0.0,0.0778474094569633
mentalhealth,jennandtonic123,2020/04/06,"Looking for resources and tips to manage anxiety and depression due to COVID-19 Hi all,

I've been struggling with depression and anxiety for some time and seemed to have it fairly managed until COVID-19 disrupted my (and everyone else's) life. I am very lucky to have a job where I can work from home, but as I have some health conditions, I cannot leave my home for the foreseeable future and it is doing a number on me and my mental wellbeing. Please share any resources you've found to be helpful during this trying time. I appreciate it!",8.856764705882352,7.824674284313726,8.330705882352941,71.67017647058826,61.058823529411754,12.08156862745098,38.047058823529404,11.20814326018867,4.2532329411764715,435,18,77,10,5,138,69,102,0.087,0.743,0.16899999999999998,0.8661,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,3,0,10,2,0,0,1,15,13,10,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,4,8,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,9,2,13,10,3,7,0,2,1,0,3,2,0,4,5,51,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690900200215478,0.0,0.30802861888094346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468046370319405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818255318806255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923762083208372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2207442418448257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21400077731674466,0.0,0.0,0.13494498626968485,0.0,0.40389402008179603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19978560020797229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21317581604521335,0.0,0.0,0.14220294212892007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16906365121900238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20288987542199696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22099616605181696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18328018902171986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104702907207918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347903364959805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13668755617723574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661155420260747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656817352806328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deesuperuser,2020/04/06,"Are all mental illnesses treatable? I know that things like schizofrenia, Bipolar, OCD,
BorderlinePD, are treatable and manageable!
But are there any other mental illnesses,
That are Not treatable?",9.551954022988504,13.781753620689654,6.490344827586206,65.74747126436785,64.51724137931035,9.383908045977012,40.70114942528736,9.725611199111238,5.518508045977013,161,9,17,4,3,45,21,29,0.204,0.7240000000000001,0.07200000000000001,-0.6759,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,5,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,14,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897862330552873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341925063518206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081879069636199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8588871712419854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831049833018248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,b3rch,2020/04/06,"Can you make phone calls whenever you want from a mental hospital? Sorry if this isn’t the place for this sort of question, but someone close to me was recently involuntarily admitted. They called me on Friday to let me know they were admitted and said they’d be calling while they were in there but I haven’t heard from them since. I know it’s only been two days, but I’m kind of anxious and apprehensive about texting them because someone else has their phone if they’re still in the hospital. When in the the hospital, is there a limit to your phone calls and when you can make them? I’m just a little bit worried

Also, what is the process for being involuntarily admitted? I know there’s a 72 hour thing I’m not super clear on, but I’ve been reading it could take longer. Thanks",4.63777712609971,5.84646468387097,5.283519061583579,82.27982404692084,69.90322580645162,8.47507331378299,27.639296187683293,8.841846274778883,1.9532580645161288,626,21,126,11,11,202,92,155,0.092,0.843,0.065,-0.7357,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,4,8,2,9,4,0,1,9,0,17,0,0,2,1,26,33,13,0,4,8,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,6,4,0,1,7,1,0,0,3,1,0,1,7,2,18,3,15,21,1,15,0,0,0,0,25,8,0,4,7,84,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668100880601155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16483229657913814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08894296874876229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929160816594587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5959455272582002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649410178774774,0.0,0.0,0.09409732636899644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188577555771883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436880605072058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15193868976866956,0.2405584341812208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14919881304039542,0.0,0.0,0.14623618464195676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19478683158226034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470389725322253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096811946514383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244075902316154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16344815883238584,0.0,0.14594552591316168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14406461390929196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879005777184486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12069498541766326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472514312414386,0.0,0.0,0.1633298681416718,0.0,0.0,0.1165207533490972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970318510200827,0.0,0.0,0.13433068007125729,0.0,0.0,0.09693349081756136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252900173076866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860591636698774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14817466775976992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Xaniis,2020/04/06,"You guys aren’t alone!! Hey everybody, so I am new to this group and I was just coming in to say that you guys aren’t alone and we are all in this together, mental health is no joke and we all have to fight it together, I have a YouTube channel started where I will be talking about mental health issues and different things that will calm you down and hopefully get your mind off some struggles for 5-10 mins a day and just show you guys how I cope. You can check out my video here ❤️


https://youtu.be/d_W59uVIEIE",4.629958391123439,5.536556184466021,4.3543966712898765,90.05145631067963,69.67961165048544,8.215811373092926,25.393897364771146,8.418075326091056,1.2720246879334254,409,11,89,6,7,124,70,103,0.115,0.815,0.07,-0.5696,3,2,0,0,1,0,12.0,2,6,0,0,7,5,1,1,2,0,12,2,0,1,2,18,16,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,3,6,10,0,0,0,4,1,1,3,2,0,0,1,1,14,3,10,12,3,11,0,0,0,0,16,6,0,2,4,60,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.368714857438457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333382604409285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479721143038685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859752526396587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299922252081576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5287528771441777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3784177378296575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767971464214843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18578888901202448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35877032153062943,0.0,0.1797322905732103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191640997816576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14155513289315966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599144204709387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18608738784398898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430720715718291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825728604054632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigtay247,2020/04/06,I'd just like to say if anyone out there needs a shoulder to cry on as most the people up at this time are either people who are worried or just got back from work and it's scary times atm with everything going on so dont be afraid to message me I really dont judge anyone And I'd like to say a huge thank you to all the staff that are still working to save and help us,2.0567871485943776,2.746097349397594,3.595361445783133,93.9242871485944,75.50602409638554,6.497188755020081,19.8574297188755,6.42735559955562,-0.11170522088353474,292,5,71,2,6,97,61,83,0.094,0.732,0.174,0.7351,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,1,1,0,2,6,5,0,1,4,0,6,1,1,0,1,14,10,7,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,1,2,4,4,14,8,3,11,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,3,6,46,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781458834081404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15293900414915051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21847828407687112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4662100456355948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17875520060517291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303737050607512,0.0,0.1590755682845542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13331602050997055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19434140486159893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14747911188011045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757793500187434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741808495964624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31634069673468995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883886971544364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18311702231017796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319561043437804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392478010324345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28959780082716285,0.20198888241744786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SecondOrderGadfly,2020/04/06,"Curious if anyone else is like this For as long as I can remember I've acted in a self destructive way in regards to most things in my life. But it's always been in such an apathetic way. Like I'll self harm and feel nothing from it, I do it because I can and that's it, it's just some kind of detached bordem that I feel. But there's never actually any motivation to do it and I feel or experience no benefits or release from doing it.

Same goes for taking drugs or drinking a lot, I'm aware that I'm damaging my body and all that but I don't really care, it's kind of a cold, disconnected not caring that I have to remind myself I should probably feel. I've destroyed good relationships with people for absolutely no reason, no anger or sadness about it or anything. Just suddenly decided I was going to do that, but it felt like absolutely nothing. What's more I don't regret it at all, that coldness has just kinda lingered with me.

I know that's a bit of a ramble I'm sorry, but I just want to know if anyone else experiences things like this? I was diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder a few years ago, but I don't know if this is a common experience for that.",3.5467916666666714,4.838070762500003,5.785833333333333,77.3291666666667,72.625,9.166666666666668,27.5,9.586721724236666,2.5118750000000007,933,34,186,23,18,329,122,240,0.18,0.7290000000000001,0.091,-0.9677,0,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,7,17,3,0,8,0,17,5,1,2,3,49,33,20,0,6,19,0,5,4,0,1,3,0,0,3,26,7,1,0,12,1,0,2,8,7,0,0,4,7,18,10,25,28,9,15,0,3,0,0,4,5,0,12,10,131,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.11385956551496924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342679757260773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970843075694758,0.0,0.0,0.07934411320387026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631660329230221,0.2390980027086056,0.09601492958525323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112499409363783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273806670651145,0.12960143926007509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23791921211934836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842432908556645,0.0,0.0,0.1337215327595351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429868360521565,0.13530785488776073,0.0,0.19493671480944028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34239641425257045,0.0,0.0,0.23598085075109346,0.0,0.1120278674926011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06631002081185684,0.097862826235512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24300152253557594,0.19236728266451286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824121582452472,0.2280092423113387,0.0,0.0,0.10325515088499412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919430317058413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998821424249122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239087572425123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808888881497841,0.10187753775716983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579714718071922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474604042586958,0.11996301383815047,0.0,0.1252670415965077,0.13217188335661406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243438354268544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060994107027385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772630936655322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15502954441175407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881890265000422,0.18522496493945306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07513592791706243
mentalhealth,bunzy2019,2020/04/06,"I recovered from mental health problems, I now just want to enjoy my newfound happiness and not have a job, is this normal? I am a 25 yo university student, I suffered from panic attacks for 4 years, I spent every single day for those years reading self-help books non stop for hours, listening to podcast, understanding why I was feeling that way and learning how to have a good mindset. I now think I hacked it, I have been happy and grateful everyday for several months now and I am just so happy with myself for having saved my life (I was suicidal at times, couldn't get out of bed in the morning, etc), I am in good shape, I eat very healthy, I never smoke or drink, I resolved my childhood traumas, I am dating a nice guy, I think I could buy a second home and be financially independent very easily thanks to property income from a house that I inherited (it isn't much, but £1000 a month with work or having to pay rent is pretty good). The things is, all I want to do now is to learn art, music, dance, read, sing and enjoy all these things that I always dreamed of doing but that I never had time or support to do. I don't want to get a job (I would like to build my own business, but I don't want a normal 9-5 job), and I just want to learn new things and take a sort of gap year enjoying my hard earned peace of mind - am I being lazy? Should I be more ambitious and want to get a career like everyone else? Will this lead to me having no experience with a proper job and having future financial problems if my business idea doesn't go well?is it weird that I just want to spend my days learning arts (I am a stem student atm) and not do anything with my degree and not really have a desire to have a job?

I understand this post might be a little confusing and all over the place, I guess what I am trying to say is: can I take a gap year just learning arts and building a business? Am I being lazy for wanting to live off an income that I was basically gifted and should I be harder on myself and put more pressure on myself to just have a job like everyone else ?

Sorry if these questions sound obvious to some of you, but I am genuinely confused and I would appreciate any sort of point of view from other people, positive or negative, Just please be kind if you got some criticism to do.",8.42125,5.708304831896554,8.716620689655173,73.89044827586207,63.18103448275862,11.78,35.915517241379305,10.008157457239328,3.2903115517241366,1798,59,365,29,20,600,227,464,0.114,0.7020000000000001,0.184,0.9847,9,0,2,0,0,0,50.0,0,2,0,5,13,28,1,4,23,0,54,4,0,3,6,95,79,30,1,22,21,0,2,3,0,6,2,3,3,1,20,22,2,1,13,10,7,4,12,10,0,1,7,6,53,18,49,57,11,41,0,1,1,0,6,12,0,16,26,259,73,22,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06261435838665587,0.0,0.0,0.05117285032355258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06192466488179164,0.0,0.0,0.08560818994949293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008131872708945,0.0,0.0,0.0970605613534545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07371674081579489,0.0,0.07699994228904779,0.12572410134419346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392408406378371,0.0,0.0,0.06340170489327815,0.14380995800495033,0.0,0.07360932756640111,0.0,0.0,0.03804886168329268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794567957052145,0.0,0.04276653469222074,0.1893493880127737,0.06018461663844602,0.0,0.08289679596660636,0.07450972376042021,0.0,0.24031634025834264,0.06740957491901216,0.0,0.0,0.07998765301482019,0.0,0.0,0.0504387548174791,0.0,0.07548228361162983,0.0,0.07410648288734836,0.08682885468629442,0.0,0.08494853856622173,0.0,0.0,0.4480464454521161,0.0,0.0,0.07836170850606883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053151580734022916,0.11029062861164754,0.07542066666100497,0.06644747909504012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583470097145746,0.07982877936664967,0.07598144937064351,0.0,0.12012829771577115,0.0,0.055317700127454114,0.0,0.11607549022528275,0.07267730222031564,0.0,0.0,0.14745882353802708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829012713335284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521691502870761,0.0,0.07862064850765935,0.0826023385026984,0.07113594812812049,0.0,0.0720690790788019,0.0765567066316124,0.0,0.14400893404959406,0.0,0.07564743316213783,0.08429766636646449,0.0,0.15054152140951732,0.0,0.04820733113700814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05984213592768554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850257544619275,0.08501152929899597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08423665846492981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629127012802855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231172055161946,0.08539325862035879,0.0,0.0,0.1131578668506266,0.0,0.0,0.06928045523620435,0.0,0.0,0.1499790599119885,0.09643483168399007,0.0,0.0,0.08775822313521983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05109007991483118,0.0,0.0,0.15667663399693998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241789165679893,0.3550770699967213,0.0597302624246203,0.0,0.0,0.06765914400327731,0.0,0.06790177873249376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05478318515556792,0.0,0.0,0.10691144580648113,0.0,0.0,0.19383515363473855
mentalhealth,Corn__bean,2020/04/06,"How do i stop my sister from giving herself an eating disorder? I tried posting this to r/ advice but all i got was people telling me to let her continue self harming just because she was overweight.......

but my little sister (f17) has suddenly started a really drastic 'diet'. shes logging her calories on an app, and shes confessed to be that she's probably only eating between 600-900 calories a day. Last night she told me that she needed 1100? calories or something like that for her to lose ""drastic weight"" so she obviously knows shes really low balling it. 

When i was a sophomore i did the same thing, and now i have severe body confidence issues and i dont want her to permanently ruin her relationship with her body and food like i did.

Ive been telling her to eat and serving her normal portions of food, but as soon as i turn my back she scoops the food back. Shes just so stubborn and defensive. Theres a history of BPD in our family and although shes undiagnosed we're all pretty sure she has it too. She lashes out whenever we mention anything about how little shes eating. She started this about a month ago.

Yesterday was her birthday and it mad me angry that she wouldnt eat her own birthday cake. she refuses to believe that there can be balance between healthy foods and treats. 

any advice would be greatly appreciated.",5.179108527131785,6.406445127906978,6.007751937984494,77.51922480620159,68.65116279069767,8.524031007751939,32.93798449612403,8.841846274778883,2.8764170542635665,1065,48,190,18,18,350,147,258,0.139,0.755,0.107,-0.8715,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,2,0,0,1,16,12,3,0,9,0,26,14,2,2,4,36,35,21,0,5,6,2,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,1,11,12,12,4,2,1,0,0,2,7,0,0,9,1,46,5,21,20,5,23,1,3,0,0,41,6,0,1,18,138,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890515018049116,0.08574740812606059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578132763432402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960249709522259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14876244079715994,0.0,0.058967153964419525,0.0,0.0,0.1089842541019128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21489570917357206,0.1218310317747002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062384375175447024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108636747330853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133696153880894,0.0,0.0,0.4949068108884124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09119066800611007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.467876655550319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927945021577921,0.0,0.0,0.07736571171251809,0.10664777770176824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009634607943766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053161579925342616,0.07884979097687264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891540054968168,0.0,0.09451709815949227,0.19390249136633514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821877710420813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721085360920114,0.0,0.0,0.07172582550781739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077677495179133,0.09477718284594397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356932512705558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706204453612306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264286967037864,0.09841159461897464,0.104293853948506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393846439467715,0.0,0.0,0.10385436262762876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009129568299127,0.10928004256464803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07446930314203105,0.0,0.0,0.1369353365230086,0.0,0.0,0.08087259140564346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116911247534668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909670733880744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06426468733569599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924319234202203,0.0,0.06567492849219878,0.10521703946525993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0570552571559116,0.0,0.0,0.11779396490969182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871589915344756,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MrUser0,2020/04/06,Do I have a problem I have come to the realization that my lasting relationships are always with depressed and unstable girls. I keep starting things based on physical attraction and staying with them out of sheer guilt. I feel like I have grown accustomed to this dynamic and it has hindered  my ability to start relationships with healthier girls that I really like.,8.72171875,10.003665234375003,8.350000000000005,63.69500000000001,60.71875,13.275,41.0,12.602617957971056,6.018168750000001,301,16,46,11,4,96,46,64,0.147,0.6679999999999999,0.185,0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,0,7,0,1,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,11,11,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,5,8,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,4,9,11,0,8,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,34,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21578259323515672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233890649647048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22335978171281126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13112458955446915,0.1852647673936491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23050362766593424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21138783615292744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253390207023493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481429342959981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166132867823276,0.0,0.0,0.5568448240359971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3671089564328963,0.27641032551871153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17228673695434082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RandomThrowaway7363,2020/04/06,"Hello I have a few questions about self harm and depression  

For starters what exactly is depression? What EXACTLY makes it depression. Everyone gets sad at points in their life and for a good reason. If theres no reason to being sad is it depression? If there is a reason does it not? I have never really understood exactly what depression is and how to know if you have it.

2nd question. Whenever i get angry i cannot calm down unless i feel pain. Anywhere in my body hands, feet, legs or head. I have to give myself pain for anger to stop. I normally just hit myself in the legs a few times and its over. If i dont i will be angry until I do it. Why do I do this? and what can i do to not do it? I have done it since i was a child and i used to run into doors head 1st because i was too weak to cause any other pain when i was angry. Now i have grown up and got stronger I can hurt other areas of my body that will not cause as much damage.

3rd question. Randomly out of nowhere a few times a week i get the urge to just hit myself for no reason. Nothing brings it on i could be watching tv, playing games and all of a sudden i get this urge to hit/slap myself. I can stop myself but sometimes the urge is too great. This has only started happening recently which made me come here and ask all of this because im just like wtf. I know theres a reason for everything else but theres no reasoning behind this.

Few notes for context:

I am not suicidal, I am insanely scared of dieing to the point i got myself into a month of not being able to sleep well as i kept thinking about dieing and not being anymore. I could never take my own life. That shit be too valuable to me.

I have never cut or harmed myself in a way that could possible cause death because reason above.

I am a man, 18 from the UK.

Any other info you guys would like to know just ask. I will be fairly open unless it comes to private details that could reveal my identity.",1.6825070592981035,3.547369629353234,3.4119739142127234,89.95193828156515,79.07462686567162,6.535000672314105,21.312626058894715,7.534196372845213,0.7282471964501811,1509,42,323,22,37,503,184,402,0.16899999999999998,0.748,0.083,-0.9799,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,2,1,0,18,27,3,1,17,0,45,16,10,14,8,79,72,25,4,10,20,0,2,2,0,4,6,0,1,4,27,16,0,3,18,3,0,5,14,19,1,0,9,3,48,8,47,46,8,38,0,9,1,0,15,16,1,10,18,238,75,0,0.07118539402162401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09681701797175704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059678278347266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330974681767624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301818664299273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581418503193532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21938102573836327,0.0,0.12263982752815633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273429788721472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3065593778092255,0.0,0.1477584005402767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062294818018228185,0.07284737312503363,0.08342875163219278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059466262394814486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802069457070407,0.06397684208593185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03599347409910414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14876572123003995,0.06828751642892808,0.0,0.05970693113719456,0.1138669250171878,0.07848214821535769,0.0,0.07048473183311289,0.06294900883994811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14611350250571736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762054365914867,0.0,0.07689244101829816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736489268620215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056069799935942,0.06955517561165077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06735734101408157,0.047516803273077605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056819502359786535,0.0,0.052329455302307086,0.0,0.16470769292944762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974657205094394,0.06830430544444183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05413969989015235,0.2272388345473861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458641300635854,0.08025083595738743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23923179854091955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04560318621644195,0.5123330867540324,0.07028698872643031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126899780803837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426189092211988,0.0,0.07307078400159761,0.058885293544251864,0.0,0.07123680326185029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040417489319813,0.0,0.05038538827771775,0.0,0.0,0.11902835374604412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786526720268043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05352255717266753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04561272614882585,0.0,0.0,0.08301755142356695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061481324728103866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05650365236701125,0.05710062924737139,0.0,0.06400421824758185,0.0,0.06423374592476411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0505680615042298,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spreanman1123,2020/04/06,"I’ve been dizzy and anxious for months. Not sure what’s going on One night last November, I fell asleep feeling a bit of vertigo. I was woken up in the middle of the night in a very anxious state. I thought it would go away the next morning. It hasn’t. Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night in a very dissociated state, super confused about what is going on and it almost feel like I’m dreaming while awake. During the day I’ll feel fine with occasional spikes of dizziness/vertigo, but when I’m in bed trying to fall asleep it can get intense. I’ve visited a doctor, they didn’t have much to say other than “I might have anxiety”. I’m pretty young so I’m just really confused what it might be, I was wondering if anyone has heard something like this? I don’t think it’s just “anxiety”, I don’t get that anxious and I can have all these symptoms without any anxiety.",2.416825842696632,4.365378926966294,3.995941011235957,86.22851825842697,77.14606741573033,6.921910112359552,25.16994382022472,7.865858978985527,1.4306056179775275,691,25,140,11,16,230,104,178,0.114,0.795,0.091,-0.1915,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,1,5,7,0,2,10,0,18,6,3,0,2,24,35,8,0,2,6,0,3,2,0,3,3,2,1,0,13,4,0,0,6,1,0,6,6,2,0,1,7,5,10,5,21,24,3,30,0,0,0,0,4,12,0,7,12,86,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311208108782431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904594146879112,0.0,0.3005138226829675,0.4437860084557405,0.0,0.09155860737913923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302555073115012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14295618119256354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444760268932881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402602697738633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986266167889354,0.0935459272808718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13682495064118766,0.0,0.2232543030697925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673627493783504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794457474766074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778203195664493,0.0,0.0,0.10451770127626396,0.0,0.09625839984665237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13925969637907448,0.3686442800615527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873057612533318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321642188503188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388563778744479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10413137629606622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080655783765108,0.12950628242912984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341252062242265,0.13610023704723978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390318619532737,0.0,0.10395436213392098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890191257605301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21608388953237054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622467872855173,0.14200243471526047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301837092750437,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thorwawy12,2020/04/06,"Advice to help a family member I think my brother is depressed. He's 24 years old and we live in the USA. We've all asked him what's wrong but he won't respond. He dosen't speak when spoken to and often turns away when we try to start a conversation with him. He  distances himself from everyone, he dosen't even want to eat dinner with us. This is getting scary.  Something has been wrong for a while and there's no way to find out what it is.

We're going to try to get a doctor involved, but I'm feeling pretty helpless. I keep talking to him even if he won't talk back.  I don't know what I can do to make him feel better. Any advice or personal experiences would be greatly appreciated.",2.131587561374797,4.1149722624113485,3.6201418439716337,88.42615384615387,78.14893617021276,6.040589198036008,24.321331151118393,7.010146845296331,0.8889733769776327,543,19,113,6,13,179,95,141,0.139,0.75,0.111,-0.4842,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,3,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,5,0,12,3,0,1,1,23,26,10,0,3,4,1,2,0,0,3,1,1,0,1,5,8,2,1,5,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,3,13,2,16,21,1,12,0,2,0,0,24,3,0,3,7,68,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30844817577104944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732594195174927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14754442393207248,0.0,0.14828113329545842,0.12135715148796722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958277560122548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593384583324078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1615398675574678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16149366869640236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20848293485833255,0.0,0.0,0.15080789038849934,0.0,0.15438245803288309,0.14878271225189124,0.0,0.15960142515148096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442485589362708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649133746900057,0.0,0.08969519170485216,0.0,0.0,0.1740018575260648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578630733742296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14028149717405752,0.0,0.0,0.08673611260702907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13936175606993734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053489515925124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165610063089134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780609880179254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605640608254302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12150086344621673,0.0,0.0,0.11170885802510833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25370640213168744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112744435772622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21430469151434736,0.1716675274898386,0.0,0.0,0.18984321098848653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308886636642327,0.12527359014037634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211386070987372,0.34511221180766405,0.0,0.1016336803386708
mentalhealth,the-names-doofus,2020/04/06,"Little to no interest in others. With all of this self isolation and what not, I have had quite a lot of time to take care of things around the house and in my life that were on the back burner before. Including some serious introspection. I have always lived in my head, but recently, it's really, in my opinion, better than dealing with people. I use to feel so much empathy for others, going out on limbs all over the place. ""You need a car? Here, use mine."" ""You need money? I have some extra saved up, pay me back whenever."" ""You need xyz? Here, I'll help in any way I can."" And, without fail, each and every one of these people really just screwed me over, in some of the worst possible ways. And recently, after a coworker did the same right before quarantine, I thought: fuck it. fuck them. fuck literally everyone. Need help? Do it your goddamn self. Need someone to use their AAA miles to tow your car? Good luck, sis. 

I'm now perfectly happy saying less that 50 words a day. Seeing no one. Talking to no one. Dealing with no one. Knowing that there is no one that has any power over me. And I'm done. 

Humans are social creatures. So, it kind of dawned on me, is this normal behavior? Is it symptomatic of an antisocial disorder? (would it help if I threw in working in customer service for years?) 

Any insight would be appreciated. Thanks guys.",1.6023576254826253,4.244645745173749,3.1935895270270294,86.58200591216215,85.75675675675673,6.635183397683398,21.607263513513516,7.865858978985527,1.3242595559845567,1044,35,202,22,32,343,156,259,0.151,0.679,0.17,0.8749,1,2,0,0,0,0,57.0,0,5,2,6,10,17,4,0,10,0,17,6,1,3,3,44,39,10,0,9,5,1,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,4,17,12,0,0,4,0,2,4,7,7,1,5,6,3,22,10,38,30,12,36,0,1,1,4,20,21,4,7,9,144,39,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08094276538769217,0.0,0.0,0.198456334522221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659769815011137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14960095707452478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16555216484338633,0.0,0.0,0.08603414205520643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918100798123128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06273601174283283,0.20057789170640133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11148857034069988,0.0,0.0,0.09954877047327948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819605831088417,0.09295292638253168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491864831622368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2697947525393312,0.0,0.0,0.055285108291946536,0.0815918450928733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632012919782236,0.0,0.10355382614873918,0.0,0.0,0.09983489383359896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19560939708560288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224530275235657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129966273577926,0.053461231167006566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871005373514891,0.0,0.09749772231517563,0.08589791302787901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270194648693784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715102372454793,0.36065058106840014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531140512754437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3295891350655621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348800946289656,0.0,0.10163439937348147,0.0,0.0,0.10966589056408173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346671380542208,0.0,0.0,0.12463705752900354,0.0,0.19209981109341925,0.0,0.0,0.08307454857451964,0.0,0.07735906098057732,0.0,0.0,0.07751766166877927,0.0,0.20296352818732927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916227430982752,0.08242300441655231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0731406573848561,0.07818805919031062,0.0,0.08956015486907394,0.0,0.0,0.06462692249466476,0.0,0.0,0.07722755739490603,0.05672335746227725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25204986897384496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15442887997433144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09377214597887433,0.0,0.0708192596313924,0.0,0.0,0.13820644813981214,0.0,0.0,0.0626435923357142
mentalhealth,harasquietfish6,2020/04/06,"How to pick the right medication? I made an appt with my dr tomorrow to discuss my options. 
A little background I have suffered from anxiety for a majority of my life and I have depression (that has been around since a few years ago) 
I want to pick the right anti anxiety/depression medication. Ive done research and I know about them but I want to hear personal experience.
I want to be happier, stop having sudden panic, and be able to get out of bed after 8hrs of sleep. But I dont want to gain weight or not be able to drink alcohol.
What medications do you take and how has it worked out for you?",3.1352499999999988,4.910002025000002,5.020000000000003,80.44500000000002,74.58333333333334,9.133333333333336,27.0,9.642632912329526,2.5571500000000005,473,18,96,13,10,162,76,120,0.152,0.7659999999999999,0.08199999999999999,-0.8588,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,1,2,4,3,0,1,6,0,13,9,1,5,0,24,22,9,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,0,6,1,1,1,3,8,3,1,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,2,15,0,20,16,2,12,0,2,0,0,6,6,0,2,6,67,18,2,0.3015523903810101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365399972133726,0.16113389868966707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115343376628142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422278012924474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597266319661179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15429639605674045,0.17670857784076488,0.14770327018968474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14748805057984324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877433892907547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993573005978554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286265373854654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649768564488828,0.0,0.15111735790860795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426680815051402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4556734625825778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769033785099878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13165195793138965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575240937311143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472362673979552,0.0,0.15088508395547556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12605565049036868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336493445424607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35572682559949803,0.0,0.0,0.18360478639855604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976686583450553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709492631094603
mentalhealth,SkylerFern,2020/04/06,"Strategies for Coping with Anxiety I've been diagnosed with Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) and I tend to get really bad anxiety attacks maybe 2 or 3 times a month. Sometimes I can fight them off, but lately I've been having a hard time dealing with them.

I'm reluctant to start taking benzos because I already have low blood pressure and I'm worried about complications.

What sort of behavioral therapy do you guys use to help with anxiety?",6.311481481481483,8.212807493827164,7.1564814814814826,67.7991666666667,66.65432098765433,11.325925925925928,36.95679012345679,11.20814326018867,5.030471604938271,361,19,56,12,6,120,61,81,0.313,0.6459999999999999,0.040999999999999995,-0.9484,0,0,0,0,1,0,7.0,0,1,2,0,1,5,2,1,2,0,6,2,1,1,0,11,13,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,6,0,11,11,0,7,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,2,5,30,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20607792230382732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5714381298596642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124495732687924,0.0,0.0,0.15592440411164604,0.11383811320913716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19252605489842348,0.0,0.18954240141532366,0.0,0.0,0.21402612652225128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756663588860842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849070635253004,0.0,0.0,0.16728697843306814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12517134100726485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21065666893637436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18761060849683425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905820110365034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963372820435868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846957334000544,0.0,0.13217918191238756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140409115872008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21355935979478874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217785203342164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612878551348679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896487697730205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pugnonymous,2020/04/06,"why go on... I am just exhausted... I have been trying to ""get over"" the tragedies that have occurred in my life but I can't. everybody says that it takes time and stuff like that... I've been struggling for a decade right now I cannot take it anymore. I started making plans since last year... to say my goodbyes, and then this pandemic happened, and well I'm stranded without being able to even visit my family. I have been on tons of medications for about 5 years and none have helped me, the ones that do make me feel like a zombie and magically times go by faster. I feel that I am not supposed to be here, nothing feels right to me, I haven't belonged anywhere since I can remember... believe me I have tried. I have tried to make friends, to join clubs, to volunteer, to matter in any way but I am always the odd one out. the one that never gets invited, the one that doesn't fit in anything. I had a couple of things that held me to this life but now it seems just not enough. no family, no friends, nothing...",2.376031746031746,4.255118625615765,3.2822249589490973,91.61761220580186,77.02955665024629,6.481554460864806,24.0856595511768,7.3871296695380915,0.9027134099616868,783,26,169,10,18,249,115,203,0.055,0.816,0.128,0.93,0,0,0,0,0,1,39.0,0,0,0,1,8,7,0,1,8,0,21,4,0,3,1,25,38,9,0,0,8,0,3,2,2,0,4,2,0,0,15,6,0,1,5,1,0,3,11,2,1,4,5,5,22,5,24,31,3,25,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,1,13,118,37,0,0.12244539613567065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188437848105016,0.0,0.0,0.08326706820380175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214329309071512,0.0,0.0,0.10076212799576073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13795403111793225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548350187546362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651882592571545,0.0,0.08087402933757616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2308612442310443,0.0,0.18573621407609348,0.0874750154650701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18920201863096264,0.0,0.1279453314670676,0.0,0.13917708075832574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827805942064286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820725679915634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980934041989308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729736088623844,0.11964127119205935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451997581739304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335085469767415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944374380190608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23497931992554336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33188867733315885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870676451826902,0.20913539853916935,0.0,0.19474698721084804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11146968991445158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20257619399847426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08666748160782292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800651378677294,0.14017068377098085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18412739875291187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134728038972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427977903330029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493971593476755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09719145608843928,0.0,0.0,0.1100931162268825,0.0,0.11048792484939493,0.0,0.0,0.1180329924006358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15770164116273205
mentalhealth,throwaway1512121,2020/04/06,"Need any kind of feedback on this Posting this on a throwaway account because the people involved with my main one might see it otherwise.  


I'm a 22 year old Male and over the past 6-7 years, I have developed an awful system that traps me in an unhealthy cycle that I have no idea how to break. I do not currently have access to professional help and all the support groups I tried didn't end up doing anything for me.   


In a normal, everyday state I feel almost nothing but apathy about myself. I feel for myself as much as I feel about a random stranger on the street. If I see them struggle, I go ""shame"" but keep moving. And I treat myself the same way. I had a lot of issues at home as a kid but was never able to voice them anywhere for a few reasons. And over the course of time, I really did not want to voice them anymore because I stopped caring about myself in that way.  


The only reason I still keep my body relatively healthy and my mind quick is because I care about others so much. Especially my friends and family and my amazing girlfriend. But that is also where the problem is. I only really live for them and not for myself because I just can't feel anything about myself. No like or dislike, just apathy.   


Recently, my girlfriend tried to coax me to speak more about my past or any problem I encouner during the day really but that is where the second part of my system snaps in place. Whenever this general state of apathy about myself gets disturbed, either by accident or on purpose, I instantly dissociate right then and there and feel absolutely nothing anymore. No physical touch, no pain, no stress but also all the affection for my family, friends and even my girlfriend is gone. I become absolutely hollow and numb for around 1-8 hours.   


Right now, I just came out of one of these cycles and I can see how frustrated and hurt my girlfriend is. I really just need anyone to give me some opinions about what I can do. If I don't care about myself and let the apathy reign, my body starts to suffer and sustain injuries and if no one is around to please, I cease to do anything until there is someone again. But if I do care about myself (or try to), my body forcibily shuts down all emotions and feelings and leaves me as a numb shell.   


Doesn't matter if it is advise, help or just opinions but I know something has to change so i'm ready for anything",5.891485652576362,6.195993155507559,6.3289069731564345,79.13937095032402,66.68898488120949,9.033292193767355,30.574591175563086,8.841846274778883,2.387697994446158,1873,65,353,28,28,607,218,463,0.145,0.7240000000000001,0.131,-0.6101,1,0,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,4,0,32,23,1,4,22,1,29,6,3,5,4,88,57,49,0,11,27,0,7,1,6,1,3,3,1,2,13,24,0,3,10,0,1,4,14,12,0,4,6,13,59,11,60,49,13,56,0,2,3,0,19,23,0,17,22,268,72,3,0.07727701900187271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738177188810808,0.0,0.0,0.12359680835275925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510204572633808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15327607579083638,0.05403388846629693,0.0,0.2543696088391893,0.13758586118221686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842941409673256,0.08534639614053212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575120417625491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838432290538169,0.3151562844629832,0.0,0.08174883953692755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04983728428793243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869262451747069,0.06844450180122373,0.0,0.0,0.05104074223381297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456997920727963,0.0,0.23444149633181405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940806637382595,0.0,0.0403740529371408,0.07413115818486525,0.043918310748365996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035943138146114,0.0,0.07751515084187692,0.0,0.07610229744677098,0.0,0.08272664712282747,0.0872363482620329,0.0,0.08065713063810953,0.0,0.13737473030681988,0.0,0.08047212358237714,0.04246942867478927,0.0,0.0,0.08182520520228766,0.0,0.07902098760763727,0.0,0.037753648071311936,0.0,0.06823702355927284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06569815810304146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08197870517493677,0.07802775999005968,0.0,0.0,0.08213324153934487,0.11361500114828693,0.11459986083267255,0.059600801031351625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571507115713956,0.1482987678100494,0.0,0.08108923204867433,0.0,0.15709472406192018,0.1175453103735322,0.08222819665294194,0.0,0.0,0.08368348098850058,0.14753931742849855,0.053574154891787004,0.0,0.08073803728188256,0.0848269610107811,0.0,0.0,0.07401002286273918,0.0,0.0,0.14788734139082518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980225486550465,0.15890729200653045,0.07630173349531252,0.0,0.0,0.13198830398628195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847393371653436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547656742688159,0.05949162464120211,0.0,0.0,0.05469707179215949,0.0,0.06171352719769041,0.06460704812142047,0.08852056417485196,0.08078671890042766,0.0,0.0,0.08769304538921853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045060851225316924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573980699165618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04557998798582793,0.12267780146905828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952773322123082
mentalhealth,DarkSaphire,2020/04/06,Why do I HAVE to stay alive? I'm just miserable constantly. For 6 going on 7 years I've just felt empty and depressed. Isn't it selfish for people to not let me pass so I can stop feeling this pain?,-0.15209302325581575,1.953626348837212,2.3081860465116293,93.83158139534883,87.83720930232559,5.300465116279073,20.227906976744187,6.742157984588678,0.30943162790697665,155,5,35,2,5,53,37,43,0.293,0.5670000000000001,0.14,-0.8186,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,7,9,2,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,1,2,3,0,5,7,0,7,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3575890352628573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850066258559996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673147088034094,0.0,0.31771917030949404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18806003601684088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383711605103459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3521045632368152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294067628476837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35269901153976624,0.0,0.27665007122588725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29858886266890217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21309094971230846
mentalhealth,KindTax8,2020/04/06,"Missed another application deadline. I missed another deadline for a job I wanted. Been unemployed for over a year. Have been looking after someone straight after graduating and now I feel like I'm too far behind. I didn't get just any job. It's not that I felt they were below me. I felt like I was running on empty. Ive been working since I was a teenager. Mostly earning half the minimum wage even in 20s. I have no savings. It was either taken from me or expected that I cover debts when my parents lost all they're money. 

I spent almost a year doing nothing and barely seeing friends since 2018. I'm broke so I couldn't go anywhere. It's my fault. I took on responsibilities I felt my family was neglecting. Im not even sure if I did the right thing.

My friends are really nice. They pity me, I can tell. I have nothing to contribute to relationships. They're all moving on with they're lives and they trying to help me move forward. But I just feel like a weight on them. The more they try the worse I feel.

I've forgotten how to hold a conversation. I haven't been in a relationship in over 10 years. Ive woken  every morning for over year wanting to end it all. I won't, because there are certain people who won't understand. I know that sounds like a cop out. I tried once as a teen, but I won't again because I don't want to pass these feelings on to someone  else.

I wish I could feel like I was living for me. I'm stuck.",0.9472194338486232,3.322011713310584,2.9538175065247967,89.23416332061836,85.45051194539248,5.767877936157397,21.928227263601684,7.1686216300943375,0.8034132503513347,1124,39,234,17,34,377,157,293,0.092,0.813,0.094,0.5457,7,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,5,3,11,18,0,0,13,0,28,1,0,1,5,42,57,11,0,8,9,1,9,5,2,3,0,1,0,0,10,5,1,2,10,0,4,7,10,7,0,1,21,12,44,11,30,31,6,33,0,6,2,0,14,17,0,4,16,151,54,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132715193070801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881265894854438,0.212213041900496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12336894984778775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079196817463849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453124706469943,0.0,0.0896242908841949,0.0,0.0,0.13367005993245987,0.0,0.08525692565476241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953929110655426,0.0,0.25582348118565684,0.21687043397458125,0.29147475952097673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15635826097014108,0.0,0.052867590082268615,0.0,0.057508599727781835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06782551315979704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10930254681169232,0.0,0.2008308901371593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05561136875959887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471815739494716,0.0,0.17870521919522794,0.0,0.08497410105834947,0.0,0.11046082075805776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21509787747048734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19418903716438352,0.0,0.0,0.10776403028220996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123595020025125,0.0,0.0,0.07015239377212598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482489475134222,0.0,0.0,0.21728034665218596,0.0,0.08641569328777393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063531599146452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16741080056514732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714758898299269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953703622140642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844450598588736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06722612891988237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124257952840044,0.2061040701820196,0.0,0.0,0.10534234181084083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17905342259355508,0.0,0.0,0.1232221395497945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11636348751255875,0.0,0.0,0.07366751338629254,0.0,0.10312123841256923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606521277390511
mentalhealth,sonicbrakelight,2020/04/07,"Married to a mental health professional but living with (I think) depression I’m married to a mental health professional, but he has some serious health anxiety issues for himself and his family.  I’ve been living with (I think) depression for a long time, and am reaching out to my UK primary care (virtually, obviously, in the current health crisis). Any suggestions for how I tell (or not) my (expert) husband that I’ve been struggling? Not sure if or how to raise it.",6.211098039215685,7.774502364705883,7.287941176470586,68.044068627451,66.52941176470588,10.84313725490196,34.166666666666664,10.864195022040775,4.283549019607843,371,17,60,11,6,125,55,85,0.205,0.727,0.068,-0.9223,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,4,0,4,4,0,2,2,19,8,9,0,1,7,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,7,2,11,6,1,5,0,2,0,0,6,2,0,4,3,40,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106040891613888,0.0,0.1244228806314398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582728502391392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801715769957925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15332710873368874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6915355662171931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16975898817093496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28723680060458745,0.1439355921152254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32781554964171644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17003173246664596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532908654723832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215878553992425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20843253120357133,0.0,0.0,0.09483953185059807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alif2020,2020/04/07,"Calm App - FREE - 30 Day Guest Pass https://www.calm.com/gp/rlg8r1  Hello there,

Here's a free 30 day guest pass to Calm App for meditation -  [https://www.calm.com/gp/rlg8r1](https://links.calm.com/a/click?_t=b215951a136f423a9cbb19359fcccb0a&_m=182fb9a102f0435fb1aa277f1cf67421&_e=7B8TX7SvOcKi8ua2j7aSYgGoJDeiGZ03tyVccd5xPJasSvx9FgsO2mf690HMvhYJH555bLXXjbdAIkc3Znjs7g04FDIiDngfHzRgi0jgg-eFTLXvw26i1vhJh15PBhkRDBQmzktvuLuSHXxFkP-Xp_Om5ecycOvZw2-UZTflLr3oENjCTHn6hsf9A49940rNdBUw7-xeRIE2eWwNmYQjngd-I47tKo-40kCNw50Dzjdu7DCDSUTePkpeAlFhiMrWD5zccwzaYdwrwlsUvYj_wHDNeEwpCPySaLBBR4psgP0yb5pCmxR0qQ7ve0f5TYkyNkZdZTTRLArplLUksfHzt0fp-xe_lBuPJYVWtaHbPRc%3D)",107.02999999999996,134.60971533333336,42.68166666666667,-189.57,-146.0,9.8,24.5,10.125756701596842,2.446400000000001,624,3,20,3,2,109,17,24,0.0,0.601,0.39899999999999997,0.8986,0,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8593008858754003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5114704170660824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1unari,2020/04/07,"Anyone else thinks that sadness or depression is a vicious thing? I was a depressed person, but now I'm completely ok, just take meds for anxiety, sometimes I feel sad and I remember the time I used to be depressed and start with a strange feeling and unconsciously I really find for things that I know will make me more sad and hate myself, like a vicious circle. Anyone else struggle with this?",7.996621621621621,7.787893932432432,7.570945945945947,73.73317567567568,62.37837837837838,10.643243243243244,37.41891891891892,10.125756701596842,3.8104972972972977,317,14,55,6,4,100,54,74,0.39799999999999996,0.514,0.08800000000000001,-0.9817,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,2,12,3,1,5,1,4,0,0,2,0,17,14,6,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,6,0,0,0,0,10,0,0,1,2,8,2,5,11,1,3,0,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,36,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692193178202214,0.0,0.0,0.2502989303127451,0.36677961243386814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18766085500004165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4624748280781975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990355916693929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18099892930888395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16358772922631515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17670920820134192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983646825170056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744232550973413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194729146306828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1988103837095372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562815389128578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466145023293392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20275348017555195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17701931521610806,0.0,0.12668548340136876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18711247606088904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345733606521671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378174454449165,0.11468543676924894,0.0,0.0,0.1043667518738128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15458432711494755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,izzahhhk,2020/04/07,can someone explain what a panic attack looks or feels like? ik experiences may vary but i’m trying to understand this better like i’ve heard it may exhibit very differently than the uh standard that they also often show in movies and stuff?,6.689333333333334,7.967391711111107,7.042222222222224,71.29000000000002,65.22222222222223,9.555555555555557,30.555555555555557,9.725611199111238,3.0452222222222214,197,7,32,4,3,64,42,45,0.08199999999999999,0.7240000000000001,0.19399999999999998,0.7732,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,1,2,5,1,1,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,10,9,4,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,1,3,3,6,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,4,2,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22334137706759916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31772311343335313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470018602114692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917898070119259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27319097326938674,0.0,0.0,0.14121315733626685,0.1995188151644023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728857439589078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345261867019991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276767572680304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366343747816166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197105893389372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18961385897395824,0.0,0.0,0.2907419721473773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304365506269873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Noredan888,2020/04/07,"U.S. - Suggestions for supporting a loved one Hi everyone,

Before I begin, I want to mention that I will be discussing suicide in this post. Apologies in advance for the novel.

Recently, I've found myself in a position where I'm (29m) supporting my brother (24m) through a difficult separation from his wife (22w). Now, I live in Maryland with my mom (49f) and my other brother (28m), while the brother in need lives in Tennessee. It is very difficult to drop our schedules and other responsibilities to travel there for any meaningful period of time. There is no internet, so working from home in some sort of teleworking situation isn't an option.

I knew things were difficult - he mentioned to me that he sat out on his porch one night with a gun in his hand and a drink in the other, thinking about just ending it all. This was the beginning of the Time of Crisis, as I'll call it. We upped our phone calls and texts to him, encouraged him to see a therapist (which he has), and for a while things seemed stable.

Cut to last week when he found his wife and best friend together at her temporary(?) apartment. My brother had one of his guns with him, but he didn't point it at her or the other guy. Evidently, he turned it on himself and closed his eyes. She was begging him not to do it, and in the end he put his gun down and walked out to be arrested by the police that had been called.

He was put into a psychiatric hospital, and prescribed two different antidepressants. While there, one of his neighbors came by and picked up all of his guns - the neighbor is still currently holding on to them. Thursday night he came home, and Friday night I went down to spend the weekend with him.

He told me that the doctors there told him that they felt his relationship with his wife was mentally and emotionally abusive - and from what I can see I think I agree with that assessment. She has - on more than one occasion - simply packed her belongings and moved into an apartment during the workday while my brother was out, only for him to find her gone with no reason or warning when he got home.

Now, my own personal assessment of the situation is as follows - the two got married in 2017 after dating for a few years after high school. They settled into a small starter but eventually purchased a small farm of their own. Over time, I think she started to realize that married life was more than the honeymoon period, freaked out, and started looking for an out. She's said that my brother doesn't ""treat her like a wife,"" but hasn't really provided any specifics into what that translates to practically. She's jumped headlong into Satanism, but the ""I want to conjure things"" flavor of Satanism - something that really doesn't sit well with my brother and his Christian beliefs. Still, he's said that he would be willing to take religion out of their marriage entirely, and each of them could just do their own thing. No dice.

Recently she's told him that she's not ""head over heels"" anymore, and that she was in love with this other guy. But, she hasn't said the words, ""it's over,"" and doesn't seem to be willing to. My brother keeps begging her to try and come back so they could work things out, but she keeps dodging that question. She says that she'll let him know after therapy, but it doesn't seem like that discussion ever happens.

Right now, I've used up my vacation days, so there's not a whole lot more I can do. Couple that with COVID-19, future trips will be difficult to manage. I know my mom is trying to make time to be there for a weekend or something, but she's in a similar boat. We've begged my brother to come up here for a week to get away and spend time with us, but he's so far flat out refused. And now he's alone there - his friends have all evidently sided with the wife, the few remaining family members in the area are useless, and as COVID progresses I'm sure times are only going to get more difficult.

I'm tired - I'm managing my own mental health well enough, but it's unsustainable as it is. I feel like I'm the only thing that can keep my brother safe, like its on me. I know I shouldn't feel this way, but I'm angry at my mom, too. When things went sideways, there was no question that it would have to be me to go instead of her. It would have been better if she had gone with me. I don't know what to do - I'm not a therapist, and I can't make my brother see the writing on the wall, I can't make him better.

TLDR: My brother and his wife are separating, my brother was/is suicidal, and I can only support him from a distance - looking for advice.",6.62645089285714,6.192418296875001,6.791875000000001,78.93705357142859,65.25,10.17142857142857,33.6875,9.65795288546158,2.9599941964285703,3598,138,713,64,49,1158,349,896,0.10400000000000001,0.8370000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.991,2,1,3,4,0,1,128.0,4,0,8,7,32,28,1,0,44,0,66,11,4,6,5,135,138,57,2,10,21,22,4,4,4,9,4,4,6,3,52,60,1,6,23,5,3,19,20,8,2,7,34,15,103,20,127,85,19,132,4,1,6,2,130,59,0,13,54,502,155,6,0.0,0.06699225813844756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05525155621515982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585597902035763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769001184755735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056073829516491265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053122462802327214,0.04347681072055429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04811252732620109,0.0,0.059336662130985963,0.1000124647003732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17320513075198746,0.12933649113746906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741073898279216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09028733985051,0.0625619321687193,0.0,0.036464495431628274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05907368015108151,0.0,0.057872471127635224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05538900087180277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636014123833231,0.10015771360379384,0.05842233257969905,0.0,0.0,0.05114489125729535,0.0,0.05402768625660258,0.0,0.0,0.05330215598960842,0.0,0.05717801437296969,0.040393154208648994,0.05428856618896997,0.0,0.05167777272859599,0.0,0.0,0.12398935133864004,0.08736741885115629,0.0,0.05908104704811017,0.0,0.06426750833357102,0.0,0.09044257102429402,0.0,0.0,0.1119696586867938,0.0499993321331593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580277408298633,0.06010081473409425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059739044265214626,0.1701467628588272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15076965861803035,0.0,0.0,0.12429459670784668,0.04608874954305278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05781736470578834,0.039936830074610304,0.11049299714406803,0.0,0.09985410197993128,0.0,0.09496099320371718,0.0,0.0,0.04806943677295893,0.10206155803725248,0.0,0.11322537745418247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11396077123694433,0.0,0.0,0.19866164943058065,0.0,0.06009451063972718,0.0,0.041924697157004635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15918069001500534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19156942202793945,0.17200898862632685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049369728938781096,0.0,0.0,0.05344985479934223,0.0,0.054150987140094385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367935410594053,0.12667851194155355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244367769994813,0.05813392830503428,0.1116555306822305,0.06070425360419905,0.0,0.0482860069173305,0.161351324937677,0.04496395367439946,0.0,0.05722286829936354,0.13516841481948208,0.15441937393321226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710970055565482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705659250676864,0.0,0.0,0.08004052199014347,0.0,0.09030799581969794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236941273023934,0.19248737357996545,0.05328955649573134,0.0,0.042512061142953785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06465996530825023,0.1312977385808113,0.26294493995074303,0.1086882487703295,0.0,0.0,0.19781830737298603,0.06498596823208838,0.0,0.16208305876980775,0.0,0.0767757350535694,0.06150075630508917,0.11046537309902914,0.0,0.06801228645801774,0.048833575487788716,0.0,0.04665253809328842,0.06669911041221571,0.044879894592429255,0.09070812644598474,0.0,0.10167493420653193,0.10482880224025777,0.0,0.06312640192890019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232555744493039,0.0,0.0,0.12049606573990165,0.0,0.0,0.036410777846543584
mentalhealth,Llsangerman,2020/04/07,"I’m not sure if I have paranoia Since I was little, I always thought there was someone behind me when there isn’t. I even believed that there was someone behind my wardrobe, and was really scared. Even up to now, I can only sleep with my back to the wall. I cannot sleep if I face the wall, as I constantly think someone is behind me. This feeling gets worse when I’m alone and in the dark. It even gets me when I play video games. I get stressed when I hear footsteps in game. When revising at home alone, I cannot concentrate if my back is towards a door or corridor. From what I found on the internet, I’m certain I have paranoia, but I cannot be sure. I don’t think a psychologist is an option yet, so I came here looking for help",3.163957219251337,4.092624385620916,4.179643493761141,89.8702139037433,73.11764705882355,7.3937017231134865,26.98098633392751,7.686295010490155,1.2956326797385622,573,20,128,7,11,186,85,153,0.115,0.826,0.059000000000000004,-0.5748,0,2,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,17,6,0,2,7,0,16,3,3,0,3,19,30,14,0,3,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,4,0,0,5,4,0,1,6,2,0,0,7,3,23,4,15,22,0,20,0,0,1,0,4,9,0,5,10,90,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30986022333976004,0.0,0.0,0.12447085187901295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300509314179321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16853668864051255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710910929262071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16165363220972975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964083251018316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756371916725651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640176986801973,0.0,0.0,0.2344637809898985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685987862577493,0.0,0.10026701449337644,0.0,0.1500509529283162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499284648196447,0.0,0.0,0.12561791316352874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376992524843625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583117559687157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14976567231814916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12374238236182634,0.0,0.29939603649382035,0.0,0.3802413294758481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713548237206408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819735832393001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19170244588936924,0.0,0.1187577396378524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244497571478374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stiff_griff,2020/04/07,"Anxiety, Depression but maybe more? \[I am a 18 year old Male in the UK\] So, for about 18 months now I have been struggling with anxiety and depression, with some months being the usual and some months being very hard. I started with **propranolol** to help sleep and panic less. I had regular phone-call therapies, fortnightly. and then in say July 2019, I was told (in a phone call) I would be moved onto higher intensity face-to-face therapy. Come round to February 2020 and NO word from the NHS Health in Mind organisation thing. So i go to my Doctor, as the anxiety had been getting bad, due to exam pressure, future career / education worries and home life. So i get prescribed **sertaline** which i was to take for 4 weeks and get more and a check up, also Dr gives me numbers for mental health service I am supposed to get help from. However, I am an idiot and too anxious to call them, idk what i would say or do?? also i didnt book the appointment after 4 weeks because of the corona outbreak, and procrastination so i have stopped taking the pills, not really feeling any different though. I am having issues at the moment with my thoughts. I think about suicide multiple times a day, but not as in a bad way, more as of an escape, or ease of stress. I barely go downstairs to eat because i am in a house hold of 5 (including me) and only speak to my father, the rest are his wife and her kids, and i dont like being seen by them. at least until dinner. i feel whenever i get food around my step mother shes going to be mad and tell my dad that im useless or something because i haven't got a job (quit my last one because of panic attacks and crying all the time). its always been a battle between whose kids are better and i dont want to dissapoint my dad. i dont know why im even posting here, if you've made it this far, thanks. it feels good to tell the story straight and have the time to think about what i want to say. ANYWAY the reason im posting: i think about my future career and how hopeless i am and it sends me into a dark rabbit hole of thoughts and fears, and i occupy myself, usually playing games to help, but procrastinate. or whenever i think about past traumatic things. i dont really tell people much because i never know how to get it out, so this is  my best attempt. My mind is all over the place, self isolation - i dont mind it tbf im a useless human any way. sleeping is screwed. barely eating or exercising. ""friends"" are cunts. ah dear. suicide is a constant thought, but not a scary one. I ovbiously got people that care about me so my suicide wouldnt benefit them, it would be selfish on my behalf. i honestly wish i got hit by a car or something quick and painless that wouldnt make my family hate me.",1.968196803196804,4.2320553168498165,3.669182151182152,86.43793906093906,80.08058608058606,6.535011655011656,23.663536463536463,7.686295010490155,1.2674773626373628,2137,75,424,35,55,712,276,546,0.239,0.667,0.094,-0.9983,3,1,2,0,0,4,83.0,0,0,3,4,24,32,7,6,29,1,44,14,2,5,3,80,84,49,3,9,14,5,5,1,1,5,7,4,1,5,18,30,4,2,13,4,1,8,14,21,1,2,17,10,60,11,60,55,12,58,0,5,2,1,35,18,2,9,29,280,78,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806815712403534,0.05101950710838343,0.0,0.0,0.08339344738522908,0.0,0.14071884269553975,0.06926919695609317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054583900799256097,0.0,0.06975536870780773,0.0,0.0,0.10239196183832283,0.18688716192095506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643469595304624,0.05422868246624931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252202055042401,0.0,0.06251536029783943,0.0,0.0,0.0528179767284629,0.0,0.06626040163713959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06735232858716322,0.0395435019020462,0.0,0.10562210602784693,0.0,0.0,0.06406177175261273,0.0,0.06275913446828592,0.0,0.0,0.35930724553426097,0.0,0.0,0.1254823719090736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040498388233673285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05780290887914049,0.06899711841383678,0.0930090582640398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741430901834166,0.0,0.0473722953330784,0.0,0.1922092820976272,0.05881952912498315,0.10454123831742494,0.05142863232758963,0.1471191060094734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492675123357322,0.06053647979814963,0.0,0.13035127203163158,0.0,0.0,0.12329570131777355,0.0,0.061504565478407686,0.0,0.0,0.07074999222261914,0.0,0.0,0.2649255624151468,0.06399757619967203,0.060846290951006014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673949215963596,0.04998041337596144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04330903519502037,0.029955714394305374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058018321484610835,0.04092865197339196,0.0,0.061599780916647376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061791722617091635,0.0,0.18573388897475188,0.0,0.1468246269022047,0.06516879961331949,0.04507403521479734,0.0,0.047290385554122384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643404280061996,0.0,0.08309810092987152,0.0466332914277382,0.0,0.14388133600487893,0.0,0.0,0.05853269658167475,0.08501706006387959,0.0,0.06406177175261273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744682807894725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521670856181894,0.0,0.0,0.0785607115362518,0.06304266869162845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628192437059614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06396556331809354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271980131513685,0.0,0.0,0.09440751861853873,0.0,0.0,0.0433995108953668,0.0,0.0,0.051262603225224204,0.07023683468776105,0.06410039828901087,0.0,0.20120800659748997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220342970703382,0.0,0.1607776614611409,0.05645118419274355,0.14023950864463447,0.0,0.08147074579962046,0.15715429199848302,0.0602422845973556,0.14603325799163816,0.10726089201659812,0.0,0.0,0.0585897018171278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506098399829322,0.050591807372908325,0.07233108173389215,0.09733896910801773,0.09836738252345743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05532780933921772,0.0,0.0705099361201592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06226898768001645,0.0,0.1306705700537954,0.0,0.0,0.03948524848587175
mentalhealth,bmmalbuquerque,2020/04/07,"Insecurity I don't know if this can be classified of anxiety or if it has any other name, but when I was younger I have been diagnosed with serious depression and anxiety. Years off any kind of treatment, I still have ""glimpses"" of depression and I have what I consider to be anxiety  (I may be wrong), that reflects even on my use of social media.
Let me give you some examples: I follow people, then I feel stupid for following them and I unfollow them; other example is that I feel that I follow a huge amount of people or, here, subreddits, then I unfollow. This makes me feel stupid and I follow them again... and this is with almost everything in my life. Am I alone with such behavior and feelings?",6.31223880597015,6.6103875000000025,7.233544776119405,73.03524253731345,65.79104477611939,12.073134328358213,33.91417910447761,11.698219412168324,4.237540298507462,551,23,103,18,8,185,81,134,0.218,0.7609999999999999,0.021,-0.9791,0,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,3,0,6,8,2,1,1,0,16,2,0,2,0,26,28,14,0,2,5,0,4,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,10,9,0,0,6,0,0,4,1,7,0,0,2,4,23,1,13,21,2,14,0,2,0,0,7,4,0,7,6,83,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866678768122878,0.19306990831940266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.253537431951446,0.0,0.4278213111804508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32111824560866953,0.18920748537311075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312546936099993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16753794515301146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3770284679811085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788264285808017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941227253547404,0.10244890866051777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906221532592564,0.13167055575622064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443358129365782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25847363020125924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19002680188192836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887140487358905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16100286407378905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038157371964545,0.0,0.12004526512530075
mentalhealth,crazymofo18283888,2020/04/07,Mental health got worse as I got older I was just thinking I remember when I was younger I was so happy I mean I got sad sometimes or anxious but I don’t remember it being as bad as it is now I am currently 20 years old now. Does anyone feel this way?,-0.7167012987012988,1.3871930181818222,2.277922077922078,92.72545454545455,91.54545454545456,5.324675324675325,20.584415584415584,6.868970318607317,0.5288961038961033,196,7,44,3,7,69,38,55,0.19399999999999998,0.752,0.054000000000000006,-0.7565,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,8,13,7,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,6,1,9,1,3,6,0,8,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,29,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334794617904393,0.0,0.14450920465620454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17256169547361785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18085923003208768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449909348541696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4958811592973279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2200051775158792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196816635317393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.225125362943666,0.0,0.0,0.20827581051484398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21686650289559312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4682360268154069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20440295464868927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13242646488713106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16404586105553987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21061545803503867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13308938128713438
mentalhealth,Adritarri,2020/04/07,"Would this be considered trauma? Throughout 7 years of my childhood, I had a friend (let's call them Ray) who was highly unstable. It started in 1st grade, when I clearly remember them saying, ""I'm going to kill you in your sleep. Don't worry, it won't hurt."" And still, I stayed. Nearly every day following, I would fear for my life. Every time I saw Ray they would tell me about all the ways that they would kill someone, every time we went out to play after lunch Ray would either try to hurt me, hurt someone else, or would talk about all of the demons in their head; The 'demons' were telling them to kill me. I was so scared, all of the time. It was to the point where when I saw them I would just freeze and let them hurt me, because I knew that it keep them from hurting anyone else. I remember that they brought a dagger with them once. I spent so long in this environment where I was prey, that the stress responses leaked into the rest of my life; I flinch whenever someone so much as raises a hand near me, I can't handle people touching the top of my head because of the time Ray went to pat my head and tore out a chunk of my hair, I apologize for everything in anticipation of some sort of violent retaliation.  
  

Thank you, Ray, for my anxiety.",6.592064615384616,5.639115148000003,6.589200000000003,82.07336923076926,65.52000000000001,9.932307692307694,30.03076923076923,9.057496981413335,2.1041046153846152,977,27,208,14,13,311,132,250,0.185,0.733,0.081,-0.9865,0,0,0,0,0,1,34.0,1,3,11,1,11,16,4,3,13,0,19,9,6,0,4,28,32,10,3,7,3,0,4,0,1,8,2,1,0,0,11,8,1,1,3,1,1,5,3,13,0,0,13,7,42,3,34,8,7,35,2,5,2,0,23,15,0,3,13,139,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06540258191249536,0.0,0.0,0.059779306643330185,0.08759858020491729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423254781059793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729880722487794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055136477945269526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14283832782935446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21609683612753802,0.0,0.07683638398765454,0.0,0.0,0.09620438035900933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06605235730814006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048588140517060965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263224148416802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032897501012824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4576148178762554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599088610084412,0.283758923849436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17484656327860526,0.12077370738566676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565939082639142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0628478366605254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104818880692282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05927068964194585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08081934784611372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936957932544472,0.0,0.0,0.06798816247846112,0.08559428542344229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555561967451562,0.0,0.2173160536802184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060513006188611086,0.0911250975799454,0.06827552062430835,0.0,0.09793294727159428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06871673989736038,0.1494508336195265,0.07871127549445725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994086688532788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05804473053041721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786106016525785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1585073610462104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682318208433201,0.0,0.4251267810658799,0.0,0.0,0.055055253773366494
mentalhealth,wooddweller,2020/04/07,"Socially Isolated. I know everyone is socially Isolated right now but I have been for my whole life in some ways. I used to hang out with my brother's friends but they never treated me like a friend, more like just luggage that my brother draged around. I'm 18 now and have no friends of my own, I was just starting to get to know some people at school and I hoped it would develop into friendship but now the country is in lockdown and it looks like I may not see them again, because this is my senior year. And to make things worse, even when I am around people it usually doesn't make me feel better. Seeing people with their friends having a good time just makes me feel more disclouded and jealous. I'm very introverted so it's much easier for me to be alone, but I still feel like I'm missing out on life. Even though it might be hard for me I think friendships would be rewarding and beneficial to my mental state. It just seems like I won't have a chance to meet anyone or have any meaningful relationship for quite a while.",3.8392256097560975,5.438031078048785,4.31516768292683,86.94543445121954,72.3658536585366,7.85670731707317,26.47103658536585,8.472884824447931,1.6804207317073163,821,28,168,14,16,259,119,205,0.151,0.642,0.207,0.9666,0,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,3,3,16,16,1,0,5,0,20,2,0,4,1,43,41,15,0,3,10,2,4,5,4,5,2,0,0,0,9,13,0,0,8,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,2,7,24,14,23,31,7,26,0,1,3,0,13,10,0,7,18,117,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251671239124424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218409444989593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450313526288411,0.0,0.0,0.21516934960165107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07367078660669554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688454072685427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964435902450927,0.0,0.0,0.115480094393674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18332052382383288,0.08633731303462891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734825040607844,0.0,0.06314063550296006,0.0,0.0,0.1013656518386894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10826043179036324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003416671213353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328351513358733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072390940067353,0.29521303391179343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148597153317994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2420106834497371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12179126602899773,0.1282057947096424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884076347674695,0.0,0.09320918213150596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25135248559276824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854190117352562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12975075229052105,0.0,0.1032076889286645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12230955442552785,0.19260817781783754,0.11001991209547153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24638855909634436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554028198469385,0.0,0.09651325648326982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028927544834195,0.07743763797860155,0.11873732918981145,0.0,0.07047027919393062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10437807534690198,0.13310236011873586,0.0997162728222335,0.0,0.09592738136696537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349279111983354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231593972240786,0.17170081995395078,0.0,0.0,0.07782528466415861
mentalhealth,mariahcareystan,2020/04/07,Can depression and bipolar co-exist? I didn’t think they could - nor can I find anything online about the topic.,3.78142857142857,6.300728333333336,4.238333333333333,83.37750000000003,75.19047619047619,6.104761904761905,24.785714285714285,7.1686216300943375,1.3191714285714284,89,3,15,1,2,28,19,21,0.188,0.812,0.0,-0.5719,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,4,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4528328533514396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4393531243849346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4739546252738436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5029451736457373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35259665980661165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asymmetricaf,2020/04/07,"I'm stuck - everyone hates me and there is nothing I can do. I'm just not likeable How do you get through life when everything and everyone constantly stomp you down? When even when you try your hardest no one ever likes you or even gives you a chance? How do you handle being a misfit when all you want is to be normal?  

I constantly blame myself for everything bad that happens to me. It's like I attract shitty things. I feel like everyone hates me, judges me or just don't see me. And I fuck everything up, every relationship and friendship. I don't understand why because I'm a very compassionate, empathic person. I don't know what I'm doing wrong.",3.0009114583333307,5.266346851562503,4.334062500000002,82.98802083333338,76.578125,8.016666666666666,26.291666666666664,8.841846274778883,2.2199510416666666,519,20,99,12,12,171,77,128,0.20600000000000002,0.652,0.142,-0.8786,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,8,0,0,12,10,3,0,3,0,12,2,0,2,2,18,28,12,0,2,5,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,1,2,21,5,6,25,1,9,0,0,1,1,12,2,1,2,10,68,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466455576622468,0.0910157578817536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32269421883052524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19723085631940185,0.13505613074181028,0.12579702936128492,0.4280058132516847,0.4025607280119903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549377068634783,0.106664477756598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13803130366394192,0.078006399254534,0.14322824442650894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320311016716835,0.0,0.0,0.2948181957331261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205485871025803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545948209833504,0.2188306050931596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14628851058041806,0.14326345820119918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117383876086716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13036853539683044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602991307598738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897782069236655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919249666384812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136920283034533,0.0,0.0,0.1554331635112698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319336554001778,0.08806474659294264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347257470011756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632430421879872,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gabis22,2020/04/07,"My bf is glad to feel bad emotions Hello guys, recently my boyfriend (23y) is being really irritated, pissed off and not very nice to closed people and I don't know how to talk to him. He changed his opinions and values (change is ok but these don't seem to be logical and profitable at all). 

Today he told me that most of the time he feels absolutely nothing. The only time he has emotions is when he is harming someone (emotionally, no violence). And he doesn't care it's bad behavior because he is glad he feels at least something. And it's better than emptiness. 

Please, have you ever experienced this or could you give me some advice? I don't think it's that bad because he likes playing pc games or talking some IT stuff or making music. Or at least that's what I see. Thank you very much and stay safe.",4.017791666666668,5.426055862500004,4.802500000000002,84.37916666666669,71.625,7.583333333333335,27.708333333333336,8.07648339933343,1.7116458333333338,638,23,127,9,12,206,102,160,0.172,0.6579999999999999,0.17,-0.3187,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,3,0,1,3,16,1,0,2,1,15,1,1,2,2,31,27,14,0,1,6,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,11,8,0,1,7,2,1,0,6,5,0,0,1,5,12,11,11,23,7,12,0,0,1,0,22,5,1,9,7,75,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408346785567568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437026840291289,0.16728818163609027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213542116677971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13989833278347247,0.0,0.2903074296027389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955383395426144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4630402390657916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411748831425655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20813784201048136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162771550048055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358629616953882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540896448875943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703559702983948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159109292297248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008677283203886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13166007719516712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10435706827673588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09512658092686503,0.0,0.0,0.15061924518774125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879024971930361,0.0,0.1354818016422812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10934141373908712,0.12491403910529975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162605738294424,0.10563367462040096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462513600191436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15707665722783085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22057406648599226,0.0,0.126327777918773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879208859055181,0.0,0.0,0.16002061887403324,0.0,0.13006237704070886,0.13111340258532025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264310553519141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ElegantlyOpulent1,2020/04/07,"Unsure about taking anti-psychotics I was recommended abilify but theres many law suits with potential heart attacks and 1 out of 7 develop TD
(which is then life changing and can be uncurable)
Im someone who would have to take medications for the rest of my life and it says long term highly increases risks and coming off it can trigger
Along with weight gain and things like diabetes and heart attacks have happened in my family

Im feeling very uncertain rn because it seems like the risks might be too dangerous rather then the results",5.591100000000001,7.76235651,5.687000000000001,76.55350000000001,68.9,9.4,32.5,9.827888789773867,3.5177,441,20,74,11,8,139,76,100,0.193,0.687,0.121,-0.8582,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,4,8,3,3,3,0,10,7,2,2,0,21,16,9,0,2,2,0,2,2,0,2,4,1,0,0,6,11,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,1,3,3,2,11,11,3,10,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,3,6,46,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835655050679301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027640882427156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17833404620363022,0.14521573246484354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15892111495743153,0.0,0.08523852015456855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907369996961695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3995334433237736,0.0,0.17811278633776348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3641881228483755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381444219464557,0.16471819924645215,0.0,0.0,0.14918695702232196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17091247107755395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16982543280315948,0.0,0.1788354951482461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340606494833523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15346783271630354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14283629305203796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535005960094316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119962819341912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390951872720657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20528359587683345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975356193285705,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StuckIndoorsSD,2020/04/07,"Quarantine making things much worse Hey all, so I’ve been struggling with depression and suicidal thoughts since I was in high school (25 now). I’ve been to multiple therapists over the years and they never seem to work for me. I always feel like they’re judging me and I can’t tell them exactly how I feel. I’ve never been one to be open about my emotions with anyone really. It’s put a lot of strain on my personal relationships and has caused a few girlfriends to leave and has caused me to be more distant from many of my friends. 

Normally I go through periods where I’ll be fine, get sorta bummed out by day to day stuff but nothing too extreme and then I’ll get into a sort of funk where for days or weeks or even months I’ll just be so fucking depressed I have zero drive to do anything. I won’t get out of bed to do anything other than go to work or surf. I’ll barely eat and I’ll just lock myself in my room and sleep like 12+ hours a day for a few days if I don’t have work. 

Now normally to get myself outta this headspace I go out and I surf, hike, ride my bike along the beach, skateboard, golf, really anything outdoors. But being in San Diego they’ve essentially banned all of that due to the current pandemic. Closed all beaches, trails, parks, skateparks, boardwalks, golf courses etc. I’ve also lost my job so have absolutely no reason to get up. I feel like an absolute piece of crap for doing nothing all day but then at the same time I have zero desire to do anything. 

Up until a few days ago I was doing okay. Bummed as hell about the restrictions but able to get up and do some workouts in my house and get outside to ride my bike around the streets. But then over the past few days I can just feel myself getting more and more depressed and I don’t know what to do. I don’t see this pandemic going away anytime soon and I feel like we’re in for about 4 more months of restrictions where it might even get worse. 

So I guess the reason for writing this is to see if anyone else is feeling the same way and if so how are you guys coping? 

Some ideas I’ve thought for myself are 
1. Cut out alcohol and drugs from my life. I already know that’ll help. 
2. Try and maintain some form of routine.
3. Try and find small tasks to do to keep myself occupied, eg. clean the house, clean my room. really anything to keep my mind busy

Anyways thanks to anyone who takes the time to read this. Any suggestions are welcome and if anyone’s in a similar boat I’ve got open ears for you.",3.0784921414538324,4.527087180746567,3.8619444990176817,90.03896782907664,74.04911591355601,7.054636542239686,24.905746561886055,7.645422480735847,1.0781995677799605,1961,62,421,25,40,625,241,509,0.095,0.826,0.079,-0.8773,2,1,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,2,2,4,25,19,4,2,19,1,37,8,3,7,7,93,72,44,1,7,15,0,6,4,2,3,3,1,5,2,13,31,2,5,15,8,0,8,8,10,0,3,9,9,42,9,71,55,22,69,1,4,2,1,16,31,3,16,33,264,55,6,0.06965211611685979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06174239836939172,0.07443692956779019,0.0,0.0,0.07686284214454199,0.05570077209403633,0.05795614032391425,0.0,0.0,0.04736582743229913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948095163250932,0.07136682406799391,0.2865887840963117,0.0620051504501596,0.0,0.0,0.06544045589924548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310381962084873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3593588217566104,0.0,0.17997379664761734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807743416122222,0.07127150345739881,0.05818540545130746,0.07834925571293819,0.0,0.0,0.07768052117568618,0.09200913158086746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21130921632365435,0.14927845701310646,0.0,0.0,0.06366077227633289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0538130521323414,0.06439225899079047,0.3275132029738419,0.0,0.15833961089142887,0.0,0.05570716010055172,0.0,0.07672965855172632,0.06896654564578752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046686345229536255,0.07359128484399992,0.0,0.0,0.06859330402475591,0.16073838065347312,0.0,0.0786287610112223,0.0,0.0,0.06911897774815555,0.12382000225217067,0.0,0.0,0.07655796291524733,0.0,0.0,0.0737515339961225,0.0,0.0,0.04919734947113002,0.13611402268166442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603351264145514,0.059215738339310965,0.0,0.0,0.04649332836554943,0.07061631341058558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388988816734941,0.0703287816916747,0.0,0.11119130912905643,0.0,0.05120231962108854,0.0,0.10744001173215437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648857049999774,0.13366616788417354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04719807649171762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06649082613475929,0.0,0.06081754118588178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700196147410038,0.0,0.0,0.069670964968675,0.0,0.1338627873864761,0.14322795182337944,0.0,0.07478030613272267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07049166005926939,0.11100743731052733,0.0634086705622565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05761695021697421,0.0,0.06970241804212036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281551486110427,0.07973500883102448,0.07618811003594246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052369723007074494,0.0,0.06087901952742528,0.06412631046347715,0.0,0.08087147524805491,0.04627377098945832,0.0,0.0,0.11059199995983554,0.08122941807044234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457842951673467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05528660773442132,0.055870726198067024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15212271025731944,0.0,0.1419629137396689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044853679144928035
mentalhealth,averyxrc,2020/04/07,"Plane crash dream/flight anxiety/depression Currently I am in Hawaii staying with my father and his wife. Originally I was afraid to get on the flight to Hawaii because Right after I bought my plane ticket I was watching this movie called Richie rich and there was a scene in it where the parents are killed in a plane crash. I’m always trying to find meaning in things so I thought Of this as a sign. Ok so I eventually took the flights and now I’m here. Since being here I had a dream that I was kind of in the same situation as what happened in the movie, except we were over water, and I did not die but I was in the cockpit of the plane with 2 pilots. The plane crashes over water and everything in the dream is so precise I even had a feeling that the plane would fill up with water in approximately 10 seconds. 
I kept getting affirmation in my dream that this was just a dream and that I was not actually going to die. But it still lurks in my mind just because the only means of me getting back to Miami is by means of taking a plane. Funny because I would have been ok with having this dream if I were anywhere other than the middle of the ocean. -_-. Is there anything I can do to help ease my anxiety induced because of this dream? Or any advice someone can give me? It’s really ruining my whole trip. Please help.",4.099306852035748,5.242237977358492,4.9445680238331695,84.45427010923537,71.11320754716981,7.692154915590862,26.777557100297926,8.032893268588372,1.5273396226415092,1044,34,212,14,19,339,137,265,0.05,0.7809999999999999,0.16899999999999998,0.9841,2,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,0,0,0,14,7,1,1,20,2,26,3,0,2,1,35,43,15,3,3,9,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,15,11,3,1,7,7,2,4,2,3,0,1,17,2,26,4,38,23,2,29,0,1,1,0,9,18,0,2,6,154,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.13186273300232546,0.0,0.0,0.13204281144722754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11243501650343432,0.0,0.0,0.09188979043954554,0.0,0.10337043154367252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119655135582612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390296153732227,0.0,0.3294843455108145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379779683339906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163831631021096,0.0,0.2804773116496774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924894040513641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214418443248296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832337664278643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350201275493505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21179206767766764,0.12962443392176595,0.07679478250374107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194907951485826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18114318748731406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949604717404533,0.14071213402379665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4415729682781576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13643796301782127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027688268361505,0.0,0.0,0.15004057757196973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14832692583738835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0865646827921687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11539620860806105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177698708569772,0.15188642070301306,0.0,0.0,0.11449116937690933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14402551681982714,0.1079111836937324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10159735685764912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977119897559975,0.0,0.0,0.10727433944994044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15012910308220176,0.09174116171427586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086249434821564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19197817375095086,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ANagyKecske,2020/04/07,"I'm afraid I'll get addicted to self-harm I don't know if this is the right sub for this kind of stuff, but seems so, so here I go.

So yeah. I am a 15 year old boy, and I haven't hurt myself in a way that leaves a mark yet, but I have noticed a pattern.  I, in the past, have scratched up my arm, sometimes bitten it too. Nothing too bad, the worst was a bit of bleeding that stopped after seconds. But lately, when I have something like a pen in my hand, maybe a pencil, I sometimes start just, poking my hand with it. And I have gotten used to that, but because of quarantine, I am always at home, and I have a knife on hand. 

I am constantly playing with it, and I have started to scratch myself with it, poke my hand, legs, stomach, and while in the beginning I was afraid to do all of that, sometimes even my face and near my eyes. I sometimes do it unintentionally, without even noticing it. I just after a while have a sensation, that something's there. I don't know if it's good or not, but I feel it. 

I do, pretty often have that, like, sense of anxiety that you get. You know what it feels like to be in sleep paralysis? Yeah, like that. I won't call it anxiety, because it's not diagnosed, I just feel it pretty often.

 I, in the past, barely got enough sleep to function, it's a bit better now because of quarantine, but sometimes I am still pretty tired. 

I also have a friend that I am pretty close to, that I barely meet, so I know I could reach out to her for help, but that would be very selfish of me, because she has way, way worse in her life. The reason I mention her, is because when she was basically what she thought was the end for her, she still tried to help me, because she thought I had issues. I told her no, I don't, and had a pretty good feeling she might not be ok. She was suicidal. (I use past tense because she isn't anymore, not because, you know.) But after some thinking, and looking at everything, I came to the conclusion that I might be a sadist. I was disgusted with myself, and had other feelings I can't put into words.

But after some more thinking, I realized I might be a masochist. So I am into some, pretty extreme sexual stuff, I won't say what exactly, but if you look through my profile you can find it. It's a way of causing yourself pain without it leaving a mark, or damaging your genitalia.

I did once put the knife away because I was scared I would do something. So yeah, that's my story. I am afraid the poking and scratching will spiral into a cut, into another, and another. What should I do?",3.53839113680154,4.318129192678228,4.742711946050097,86.7373434489403,72.10211946050096,7.539306358381504,28.289499036608863,7.695328111545312,1.5586458574181117,1957,72,418,23,36,647,208,519,0.11199999999999999,0.7070000000000001,0.18100000000000002,0.9904,0,2,3,0,0,2,90.0,0,6,0,2,24,23,2,4,28,4,57,17,11,4,2,84,87,37,1,7,24,0,12,4,1,9,6,1,1,1,38,22,0,1,19,1,0,4,15,12,0,1,17,16,78,11,50,55,9,52,0,2,3,0,28,20,0,14,28,316,116,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941740528696994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05092252979859429,0.052984423226191096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335419198066156,0.09742556837382887,0.0,0.06315054280846415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059826703298421775,0.0,0.05316769357920992,0.34935255707403884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05631719367038634,0.13903773624347454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06502140789808881,0.07282960420842292,0.0,0.06541389145048804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881229087575264,0.0,0.05084095887026156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06463088556363347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05639898358176245,0.06579543516747978,0.0,0.08411620824141408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722884451108205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16098519913381612,0.045490911464714213,0.0,0.0,0.05819968828744782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0491967462522096,0.0,0.06653728170435162,0.0,0.03618914626669911,0.1068186101994478,0.05092836981552591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536279540703379,0.0,0.06387329302747141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816762033573873,0.0,0.0,0.06646231716057982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06630986941643431,0.1749762616077255,0.0,0.07183050843283408,0.1348496455765175,0.0,0.0,0.04497699762987133,0.12443759961373498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694540248373707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397217550131896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20265392510166855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06109986595566864,0.14499353227539022,0.0668183732311007,0.06781400125602244,0.0,0.0,0.06775689194810228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18236090531012286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886948344905984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280260859621589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547063326523042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05437986977482755,0.0,0.05063856180034696,0.06375185553138993,0.0,0.0,0.05796921289968016,0.06642907136573825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12744611345033668,0.0,0.0,0.14706515818330687,0.314891251781545,0.0,0.09014191564825827,0.0,0.10170518056522587,0.053236881712549526,0.0,0.0,0.14579002087562604,0.06965237927140411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160339045780207,0.0,0.10110496141657292,0.0,0.0731874245824968,0.0,0.06084616911685016,0.0,0.04323255059408612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999308682582502,0.0,0.05254025147537426,0.0,0.20217557667360886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12276484613727652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06489237431932791,0.09046872695483556,0.0,0.0,0.04100594528524913
mentalhealth,h2y75,2020/04/07,"Feeling frozen after upsetting period of time? I have a history of anxiety and depression, but what I'm dealing with now is really hard to understand. I was in a high stress situation for over a week, trying to care for someone who was very mentally unwell. It took a huge toll on me and ever since I have been kind of floating by. I just don't feel connected to myself or what's around me, and I'm like, half way present for my responsibilities. It's really hard for me to keep up with school and I just feel like I'm half way depressed, and half way dissociated? I don't know how to understand this or cope to move forward. I have constant anxiety about classes and I half try and am in a perpetual state of catch up. I keep thinking that I'll eventually snap into my senses but it hasn't happened yet. It's getting better each day but, for the longest while it was so hard for me to do the most basic of things. Another thing is that the situation with the person I was caring for didn't have a positive ending. I was trying to find them help and they ended up going to an unhealthy environment. Any advice?",3.7153706146135583,5.146662905829602,5.6119810076497005,78.19144025323136,72.40807174887892,9.013874967027169,27.467422843576887,9.478462496947786,2.4648176734370875,880,32,173,21,17,304,125,223,0.133,0.753,0.114,-0.3388,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,1,9,10,0,2,11,0,18,0,0,1,1,34,36,16,0,0,7,0,6,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,13,14,0,2,8,0,0,5,4,4,0,4,8,6,20,6,36,28,2,33,0,2,0,0,6,12,0,3,16,125,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512706985093847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011797239526122,0.12353888726790728,0.1802557028650713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10487997785387304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041974452691086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24023968633819776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273157351258165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598067457662744,0.1214616859889183,0.2029470957347004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20869754410664806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657005651329893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17871181480446752,0.08416677836131083,0.0,0.0,0.1076804158691476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06155326923179125,0.0,0.06695675586269459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418306736155077,0.0,0.31661623859470656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896864725274495,0.12447760014518128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20943807086659114,0.0,0.1226857827781612,0.06474782656597929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511653129468208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11872941297228724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521828158352488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287116999787677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15095010736606956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923467151074205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745745988667956,0.26485710769152165,0.0,0.0,0.09982393369016553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495623359111256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654157892869333,0.07549084264359973,0.0,0.0,0.0686986444388916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089636268545454,0.23996515259992476,0.0,0.0,0.24529832046060324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720938883375574,0.0,0.2805472522542819,0.09450377079631762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BroCast97,2020/04/07,"I have to make my music really quiet before turning it off. Does anyone else have this? I don't know if it's a kind of OCD or something but I can't just turn off my music while it's playing at normal volume because the sudden change makes me feel uncomfortable/anxious. I have to slowly reduce the volume, as if it's fading out over the space of a few minutes before I switch it off.",3.1346666666666683,4.323583800000005,4.949999999999998,83.32166666666669,73.5,6.333333333333334,22.083333333333336,6.42735559955562,0.5613333333333337,304,7,59,2,6,104,55,80,0.0,0.968,0.032,0.29600000000000004,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,5,0,5,0,0,2,0,11,11,6,0,3,5,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,8,2,11,11,1,10,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,3,3,42,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16710197578911434,0.2448656006651105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568138757952265,0.0,0.4067126587079501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25281157793425113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20913501496295306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199639040154052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083662788905128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488632824370665,0.13133841823393225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3190450724360082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23415190626643576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15309817630325556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18398024466904564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5198882182971691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SenCorBrN3,2020/04/07,How to get rid of intrusive thoughts? I was raised Christian. Once I found out what the unforgivable sin is my brain started spamming the worst things about Chrisianity possible. I can't stop it. It is stronger than me. It just pops out of nowhere and never stops. I am not to sure but I think I have OCD. Can anyone tell me how to shut down these thoughts?,1.3661746031746027,3.998519014285717,1.6033333333333353,97.42055555555555,87.42857142857142,5.396825396825397,23.49206349206349,6.937597516519254,0.7197301587301594,281,11,61,4,9,84,54,70,0.14300000000000002,0.81,0.047,-0.687,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,7,1,1,2,2,16,13,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,2,4,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,9,1,10,9,1,8,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,42,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18342102297641608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928371192990033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876215629709872,0.0,0.0,0.13705195575649556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20231821558063684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793634263902752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957276428498296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18567223545627465,0.0,0.0,0.4386243964399851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24723454657765265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22928021690454164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17427449278605028,0.16808477852005904,0.0,0.4165073277383406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OrcaAttack,2020/04/07,"I (15M) am ""dying"" inside, but have received no true help, or even validation, for the past 6 years I am a 15 year old boy with high functioning autism, ADHD, anxiety, depression, etc.

Everyone around me who has had an influence in my life (parents, teachers, coaches, therapists, peers, etc.) has always pushed off my feelings as just attention seeking pity parties. Every time I tell someone, especially in my family, that I feel worthless or something like it, they always say something like ""We aren't going down this rabbit hole/spiral again"". I can't take criticism because that's all people do to me, a compliment towards me where that person means it might as well be one in a million, I can't trust anyone because I feel like they will betray me in some way, and I am terrified of any slight raise in someone's voice, to the point where I avoid any and every situation where that could happen. This has been the case for the past six years, maybe even longer.

Even worse, I have tried to kill myself many times, especially in middle school where the blatant criticisms of everything I did were at an all-time high, but I haven't succeeded due to fear of what might happen after death.

Things have gotten slightly better after I got out of middle school, but I still fear of the next time when someone close to me starts attacking me, mainly verbally, out of seemingly nowhere.

My family says they love me, but I can't even trust that claim.

And for all I know, once I post this, I am just going to be berated by hate and destructive criticism because that's all I have ever known.",13.226400000000005,7.751531506666669,11.84333333333333,63.58500000000002,57.26666666666666,15.333333333333336,44.66666666666666,12.161744961471696,5.159666666666668,1252,44,229,25,10,400,172,300,0.22899999999999998,0.652,0.11900000000000001,-0.9925,1,1,2,0,0,1,49.0,1,0,3,2,17,21,4,3,11,0,27,2,0,1,6,38,43,13,3,1,8,1,3,3,0,3,1,3,0,2,14,10,0,1,8,1,0,4,6,10,1,3,6,6,35,11,34,31,7,47,0,3,0,1,14,23,0,6,21,157,49,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137989399966792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15757927698414506,0.0,0.0,0.12878485004043114,0.0,0.07243756603038977,0.0,0.0,0.06620942699205333,0.0,0.0,0.08429414659621168,0.0,0.10772350802397904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731663760915705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374558143693041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07560223412978723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155633033681317,0.0,0.0982732367430721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21120868805622134,0.2501673222098538,0.08565249679032846,0.15956076328291655,0.0904803218840052,0.08510123722774221,0.0,0.1785305485097224,0.21310507783904656,0.14363427818979574,0.0676465317680003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076289814279038,0.0,0.0757322171768467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16746805124717612,0.0,0.0,0.09348673927300878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346868929837016,0.2000902992028054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10476041965517983,0.0,0.05203912983222657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668823244255803,0.1387822055719901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546139269535302,0.0,0.0,0.0960007649606567,0.09512879964330367,0.10314513402339308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009021837681939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070385476883743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936119242125524,0.10084172513973508,0.0641643726362705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051420032092597,0.0,0.18078457692032565,0.06564610094979936,0.0826796273394199,0.0,0.0,0.08951262587719662,0.0,0.09068681422894727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506025256130593,0.0,0.19166260491933307,0.0,0.08620219018970195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643549092803936,0.0,0.0,0.24069150678158505,0.1457939263718606,0.0,0.0,0.06702204642852848,0.0,0.07561953043535245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119507131765977,0.0,0.08276320530507171,0.0,0.0,0.10994235060345536,0.06290780696484684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564344473912673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428827238256128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516048881969233,0.0,0.0,0.08513765267356606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649716656696056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18293170379101664
mentalhealth,DepressedRandoAcct,2020/04/07,"This is not a cry for help, just a dump of thoughts Why do I feel so worthless? I still have my job while thousands and thousands are forced into unemployment. I have friends and family, but I still sit alone in my room til dawn before passing out from exhaustion. I can't afford to take a day off of my stupid ""essential"" job. I get no thanks, no extra pay, no friendly customers... 

I'm done.",1.8019230769230743,4.080945538461542,2.886858974358976,91.7310576923077,80.7948717948718,5.951282051282053,23.852564102564106,7.1686216300943375,0.8935333333333331,304,11,64,4,8,97,60,78,0.32299999999999995,0.5479999999999999,0.129,-0.934,5,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,2,0,3,0,7,1,0,0,0,9,13,6,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,1,1,5,4,0,2,2,1,9,3,10,11,1,12,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,5,45,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436551920720869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20018628902162852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258418650880487,0.1517212340979754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407494816701916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217792620218648,0.0,0.11895295411676232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635177849342928,0.0,0.1229120170707865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576877368224857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4669123324605404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3757529183523257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768839059559014,0.0,0.0,0.21659293992806386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867676951215498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122827546654189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bhughey24,2020/04/07,Anyone here take Vraylar to treat symptoms of bipolar depression? I’ve just recently started taking Vraylar. It makes me sick to my stomach when I take it every other day. Does anyone experience this? Should I keep trying to take the medicine? I’ve tried just about every mood stabilizer there is and none of them have worked for me. This is my last medicine before the doc puts me on lithium.,3.52099315068493,6.409260054794522,3.809845890410962,84.00052226027398,78.58904109589042,5.8417808219178085,26.93321917808219,7.1686216300943375,1.6017958904109588,316,13,54,4,8,98,52,73,0.099,0.866,0.035,-0.7041,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,1,6,3,0,0,2,0,4,4,1,1,0,6,11,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,8,1,8,10,1,7,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,5,34,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2781063394877457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16922206964108974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825344516869353,0.0,0.17128476655406474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17403077730051192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3351098311710857,0.0,0.0,0.1945311200614815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676306697590247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16210400946029538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327459726430132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19991732555268893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19635821519847327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14075983469433245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20670005700221128,0.5980961193365951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27003671405359164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447783143954781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ainstenberg,2020/04/07,"Ive been feeling realy bad lately, and have been experiencing some scary stuff. Hi, thank you for reading this. I'm 18, male, if any of this matters. Ive been strugling with depression and insomnia for about 6 years now. I'm not self diagnosed either, I went to a doctor. She didn't describe me any meds, and the only meds I'm on are for allergies and some vitamins. Nothing extra.

About a year ago I started experiencing visions of suicide. No, I'm not talking about just the thought of suicide. I'm literaly day-dreaming about it. Even when I'm not depressed. I can hear myself scream alot too. These visions come out of nowhere usualy. A few weeks ago I started talking to myself. It's always this dialogue: 
""-What do you want to do?
- I wanna die."" .... and that's it. Nothing else, just these 2 sentences. 
Oh, almost forgot to mention, I can also hear my brain ""click"". I can't realy explain this, but it's a realy loud click, and sometimes it even hurts.
All of these might sound random or dumb, maybe even fake, but these are realy starting to concern me.",1.6019024390243928,4.225123921951223,2.9767804878048807,88.32565853658537,85.39024390243901,5.0360975609756125,24.785365853658533,6.55674776486733,1.0082839024390249,824,34,156,9,25,267,121,205,0.142,0.8029999999999999,0.055,-0.9696,0,0,0,0,0,3,47.0,0,2,0,0,13,8,1,0,7,0,15,5,1,0,1,33,34,12,3,3,10,0,1,0,0,1,4,5,0,2,16,9,0,1,3,1,0,2,6,7,0,0,7,10,17,1,21,26,7,15,0,3,2,0,12,2,1,8,11,103,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260594154036995,0.0,0.12768260471909998,0.0,0.0,0.10196950806623327,0.10609833393817276,0.0,0.0,0.1734220169970949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646532253466172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14234306086043996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10983836674412464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223324582449114,0.0,0.21964793687225154,0.12941972115043368,0.13233499846811272,0.0,0.0,0.13051164121091152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065180418053736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25265697939688586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447276530268918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2874255306508657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365018340442489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383656189142635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810069121853224,0.0,0.28326919407944656,0.0,0.0,0.13526770391572904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446981051041306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09697691739799848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754426477898306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13302048730202756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611041189635047,0.0,0.27075619076139834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14596816741480745,0.27894996097165004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049750283232253,0.0,0.11739385445185616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10122850553065048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520855942031185,0.0,0.1022806372612216,0.0,0.0,0.11820282389857205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642242082263225
mentalhealth,kayday1994,2020/04/07,"DID or not DID My husband mentioned something to me the other day about something I said a few days ago. He explained to me the exact time and place and what was happening before and after I said something of cruel nature. I am a kind person. I am a humanitarian and animal lover. I am an empath and it kills me to hurt someone else's feelings. So this was completely out of character for me, which is why he confronted me with it. The thing is, I don't remember saying it. I remember the few minutes before but I have no recollection of the moment, and moments shortly after, he was referring to. He informed me that that is not the first time something like that has happened either. I decided to ask my mom and she said she does recall hundreds times the same thing happened while I was with her, spanning almost a decade. My sister as well. Then I asked my best friend who I see nearly every day (not lately though) and have seen for the past 3 years. I believe this is linked to my mood disorder, and that it may be something deeper than just mood swings. Just for some background, I have struggled with depression, ADHD, PTSD and anxiety my whole life. I don't want to labelled as crazy, even though plenty people have called me that in my 26 years of life.",3.5317006802721065,5.542538306122452,4.46857142857143,83.80476190476192,74.10204081632655,6.9523809523809526,25.952380952380953,7.793537801064563,1.551707482993197,995,35,186,14,21,322,139,245,0.115,0.804,0.081,-0.6841,0,0,5,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,2,8,14,3,1,13,0,22,3,0,0,1,37,35,19,1,1,8,3,1,1,2,1,2,4,0,1,17,14,0,0,9,0,0,0,6,6,1,1,10,7,32,6,26,23,7,24,0,2,2,1,24,6,0,4,19,143,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270884576549582,0.0,0.09373915633210886,0.0,0.1058912730821713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0808968742885485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19772007261778535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17996739341028198,0.1191417006794935,0.11097592467944156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798045623122296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087468894309876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20459599275543106,0.0,0.09108053409641884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12119628528105103,0.0,0.09254072305806813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833882327044731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698455080870021,0.0,0.08909718890380483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05346932898220032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899491322160177,0.0,0.0,0.08170058565528918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805376263624185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320534239410428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699441275684545,0.1101201924671006,0.0,0.0,0.11928826708973972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493857755770586,0.051663095328809035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238506933831995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009483614226934,0.07331229729393914,0.0923350104874458,0.1104840758401944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12361366707039605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23958357268051536,0.0,0.3017714822529774,0.0840949955230847,0.0,0.0,0.0842674061495225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959987491509787,0.4070496007827708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055069306073173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14050844694777515,0.0,0.2077936016488447,0.0,0.1849873989438234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06237286685381685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095080085692914,0.0,0.0954210555822886,0.11806378340394486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619639510217113
mentalhealth,curiouzness,2020/04/07,Does Anyone Have Personal Tips That Helped Them Get Out Of A Bad Head Space? Ex. Making Your Bed In The Morning,0.16000000000000014,2.3390945454545498,1.036818181818184,97.42522727272728,103.54545454545456,4.0181818181818185,14.590909090909092,5.985473137389443,-0.5722181818181817,88,2,18,1,4,27,22,22,0.149,0.851,0.0,-0.5423,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147431756666948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3758419137452755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39391406619639496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351757017061077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4619659044624117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30171438921483823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004670016770126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39303841845468995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anddreimunteanu,2020/04/07,"I don’t know if I have BPD I don’t know if I have BPD

Hello! I am diagnosed with CPTSD and for 3 months I have been having this thought that I might have BPD which is making me really scared as I know is a personality disorder which is very hard to live with. My therapist is saying that I don’t have it, only some BPD tendencies. To give you some examples as of what I think are BPD symptoms: for example, when someone tells me “goodbye” in a cold manner, I get this fear of abandonment or rejection. But the thing is that I tell myself :”this is your fear of abandonment, maybe they are in a rush or something” and this calms me down. Another thing I have is this black and white thinking but not with persons, it’s more with ideas. “I am either perfect or I am not perfect”. But I can control it. Like I realise that I’m doing it and see in between. My therapist is telling me that due to the fact that I worry too much about hurting people is a sign I don’t have BPD. When I broke up with my boyfriend I didn’t move on fast as a person with BPD might do, or is it a stereotype? Sorry for my English mistakes, I’m not native. What do you think? Thank you!",2.7950253573075163,3.874114286307056,4.222538035961275,88.63614914707243,74.18672199170123,7.513231904103272,25.83702166897188,7.984000788550335,1.3217964960811437,897,30,199,13,18,298,119,241,0.151,0.772,0.076,-0.9182,0,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,4,1,3,4,14,0,3,8,0,35,2,0,2,3,44,49,18,0,3,13,0,1,1,0,2,2,1,0,3,22,10,0,3,8,0,0,2,8,9,0,0,3,6,35,5,26,44,5,13,0,5,3,0,14,6,0,10,6,150,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08891686963420124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7475904708992885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510685505979018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606699730431591,0.0,0.0,0.09718451342230673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908400169306874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044302843718941866,0.0813448459306653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07596130372062501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077676012811577,0.09572529935702133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398063601150949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041427447794933035,0.0,0.07487715427774708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056602542360565736,0.0,0.08518981301907612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1799120722064242,0.0,0.0,0.06768402055043754,0.09012561036943514,0.062335426763281174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06449181016680343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058787444878039774,0.22212396308822385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0543230205272548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06743384256546889,0.08489641957269826,0.0,0.06757209468103775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07184807872725106,0.06528074239087721,0.0,0.09492310856065636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08813637430540014,0.0,0.0,0.222348500493082,0.0780695280814805,0.0,0.1969113102636603,0.11267049164648378,0.16300315380112773,0.0,0.06731921097634995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06996626524089508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861152968145405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DeadPetalLivingSeed,2020/04/07,"Help? Hey so my friend lives in the UK and I live in the US. She has depression (not diagnosed but it's obvious) and cuts sometimes but she's trying to stop. It's hard for me to be there for her since I live on the other side of the world but I try. She really needs professional help but is a minor and her parents aren't really supportive. She's tried talking to them about it but always gets shut down and/or yelled at, they're the type that don't really believe in mental illness and stuff. I'm pretty sure they know she cuts as her dad brought it up off-handedly at one point but I don't know if they know for sure. It's hard for me to know the entire situation as, like I said, I'm on the other side of the world. We've been best friends for years and I worry about her. Is there a way she can get professional help online in the UK as a minor without parental consent? She's homeschooled too so she never really gets to leave her home, not just during the pandemic.",1.684814622763806,3.616967162561578,3.2832460461498587,90.55308789214416,79.34482758620689,6.835260565206119,20.536427275084268,7.85451343220497,0.706079802955665,766,20,169,13,19,253,109,203,0.125,0.715,0.161,0.9192,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,3,1,8,10,2,0,13,0,9,2,0,0,4,26,22,17,0,2,11,3,2,1,2,0,2,2,1,0,9,5,0,1,4,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,3,4,26,7,28,18,1,21,0,1,0,0,28,16,0,1,4,108,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156167916484757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13751708806372862,0.12809189326708334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10512800939381316,0.12388586803581575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18860275736101514,0.0,0.1913101335870924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21867922300781764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24543785640733834,0.0,0.12243369840915196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2683186017445791,0.0,0.0,0.1292413468489521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059631165154246164,0.0,0.3233372213841097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300532606378532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050414432876357,0.09413832546493804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08270937082868207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271060982155988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538385966141446,0.0,0.0,0.12417643296484215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127728287557639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610470351250494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096728629078104,0.1371978268750936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071806141487185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020455970077298,0.0,0.0,0.13972671989272092,0.0,0.13850948821173292,0.2300756374813632,0.0,0.0,0.09810525429880974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24860724146247845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14682023263457794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688362070790242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11765914543307425,0.0,0.0,0.12395539093004106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860107566204698
mentalhealth,ATOFICYS,2020/04/07,"Does joking about an insecurity/slight trauma help the person suffering from it? Or is it worse off? To keep it simple:

Let's say my bestfriend is insecure of being fat, does joking about it help him overcome his insecurity?

Joke goes like: ""Yeah i'm not gonna be friends with you anymore cause you're fat"" sarcastically  
Not like: ""omg you're so fat no wonder you can't get a girlfriend"" type jokes... 

only jokes relating to me and him. I wouldn't wanna make jokes that could really hurt him. Any ideas how joking about a certain insecurity/trauma might help someone? or does it not?",3.2192383292383298,5.740016558558557,4.504013104013109,80.74407862407864,77.10810810810811,6.91924651924652,22.703521703521705,8.00094639256281,1.3091369369369366,462,14,86,8,11,152,77,111,0.192,0.58,0.228,-0.2698,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,0,0,5,16,0,2,4,1,9,3,3,3,1,18,15,5,0,3,5,0,0,2,2,3,3,1,0,1,6,2,3,1,2,7,0,0,6,5,0,0,0,1,9,11,10,8,0,1,0,2,0,0,13,1,0,4,2,47,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307703236524346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907095328242488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975446627050472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15353558470418852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5048480330073551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14857019555142265,0.0,0.10046860521626087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.386683109328683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20586070126743328,0.2170828439664476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709247219665385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1966393718290147,0.0,0.18789574430170666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283614776229129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039994889585202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14625251273791975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16790859519957907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319204920866315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15292436191920816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16293482881119728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20854071550983208,0.0,0.0,0.1959697231396812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,careerpivot,2020/04/07,"200+ Free and Awesome Mental Health Resources Without question, the last few weeks have created an extraordinary  amount of challenges that are gripping our economy, critical  infrastructure, educational system, and way of life.

Based on some ongoing conversations with family/friends, adventures  into the bowels of Reddit, and the constant battering of news (and  misinformation), a common pattern emerged: The stress and unknown  circumstances of current events is taking an extreme toll on all our  mental wellbeing. 

[https://benstew.github.io/awesome-mental-health/](https://benstew.github.io/awesome-mental-health/)

Hopefully this list can help at least one person. Forward as you see fit :)",14.688341013824882,18.768683333333346,10.146267281105992,45.98225806451618,49.0,12.196006144393241,44.46850998463904,11.765960540728905,6.750780030721966,582,29,56,16,7,162,78,93,0.047,0.733,0.22,0.9509,3,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,2,1,0,1,0,5,0,1,7,0,4,3,1,0,1,13,7,6,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,7,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,2,3,5,12,7,5,14,0,0,1,0,7,6,0,3,7,38,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536427936688034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.125375159639599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5174800405579777,0.0,0.0,0.10877115781776532,0.0,0.0,0.1611781290969464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132277785186583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462136599535212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6541500286657316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996340367906264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416944148849944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18178788919742614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12931412196954484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858882770961972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201245092261714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128808290850857,0.13016918644637004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.156429676301007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CanIventpleaseeee,2020/04/07,"For all of those going through tough times. For all of those going through tough times, just know that I love and care for you. Even if it doesn’t feel like it. Even if you wanna give up, know that I care and you don’t deserve any of this. You’re only human. Nobody is perfect nobody can BE perfect. Accept that you are HUMAN. Humans don’t have to be perfect. For all of those going through tough times, know that it will get better. If you carry on and don’t give up, you will feel so much better. Maybe if you’re dealing with self esteem issues or abuse or ANYTHING. Just know you are important and that you can do anything. Fight for what’s right. Your happiness. Your mental health. Your well being. Yourself! I love you. You are important. ❤️ Don’t give up. Not just yet. For there is hope everywhere. As long as someone believes, there is always going to be *hope*.",0.2325476343395429,2.6251059306358395,1.3007964033397563,97.14882252194391,96.63005780346823,3.4878184542924435,16.23399700278313,5.3279370663704135,-0.7091150074930419,678,17,139,4,27,211,83,173,0.055999999999999994,0.698,0.24600000000000002,0.9899,0,0,0,0,2,0,30.0,0,13,0,5,10,19,1,0,0,0,21,3,0,0,6,31,41,13,0,7,10,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,4,13,5,0,0,7,0,0,4,6,4,1,0,0,2,16,15,23,35,4,14,0,0,0,2,24,5,0,8,6,98,29,0,0.0,0.15578314115101655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094024831994348,0.0,0.0,0.08941139128533768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21639484245851956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813373548213776,0.0,0.2325680061878319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268106692609234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13555083843802238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17368353751150206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13296119479046428,0.09392984530565288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686932441702799,0.3783848322892117,0.2988940692658024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996366038659308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13975784613295714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611800231990417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723170120235625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890334382105942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423483342926206,0.0,0.0,0.11635629065868065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23733294777064845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13209004513716702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325016308197475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09665345001945956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09999700450103248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122838077151548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371630551307348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114031786872942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300023775587212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821694825007086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imnothereorthere-,2020/04/07,"Guilt and Sexuality I'm struggling with guilt that I deal with after masterbation and I want to stop masterbating entirety. To be clear, I don't consider myself addicted to masterbating, I watch porn/masterbate around once or twice every 2 weeks or so. I go through periods of being sexually active and periods of being completely uninterested in anything sexual. After masterbating I'm always left feeling disgusted and mad at myself for wasting time on something that doesn't even make me feel good afterwards. When I'm in a period of sexuality I can't control myself and even turn to things like Omegle so that I can have an experience with strangers. It absolutely disgusts me that I could do something like that, I never considered myself to be a sexual or crude person and I feel immense guilt when I'm around other people who are more innocent than me. I feel like I lost my innocence and there's no way to get it back. Once I've done disgusting things I can't undo them. I want to enjoy my youth and have good social experiences, not just sexual ones.

So, my question to Reddit is this: How do I stop doing things I'm ashamed of, and once I do, how do I move on and stop carrying the guilt from it? I want to be a better person and I came here for help. Also if it helps in any way I'm an 18 year old male. Thanks everyone.",5.473712669683257,6.304187742307692,7.03085972850679,71.89531674208145,67.73076923076923,10.733031674208146,30.294117647058826,10.718039707386858,3.3827149321266963,1063,39,197,30,17,367,140,260,0.163,0.68,0.157,-0.5574,0,0,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,3,16,20,5,6,6,0,21,1,0,4,2,42,41,23,0,6,6,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,3,15,17,0,4,5,0,0,3,7,12,0,2,3,5,30,8,31,32,1,32,0,1,1,0,10,9,0,5,21,138,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122877960922227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013959252416966,0.0937894157777852,0.0,0.0,0.0766512962712541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927563308344324,0.20068371714996844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667226957599533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996888589320145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289180029548535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181814311389922,0.0,0.1264214873275071,0.08999520122486046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162060821061578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534843144246468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488967803749721,0.0,0.0949687741673542,0.10770574267504268,0.0,0.22051733839117912,0.0,0.0,0.2279720243238202,0.08052491184551501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05888988120010594,0.0,0.06405956088944903,0.1890830254399916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110340403642894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224671442647981,0.0,0.0,0.16520321999267815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304371357925685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523934617796342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980013114764987,0.0,0.0,0.0869341529232168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11827733146803647,0.36011917307494795,0.07637982783623785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814364393600656,0.19683994223858284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626862406093586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11490059340287105,0.0,0.17354981492575386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827089017654678,0.0,0.11783608363519064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377449500157117,0.0,0.0,0.22465212086313788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572607856749113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12260352222851195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19944988543261305,0.1789387150616503,0.09041462630034916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072585930308254
mentalhealth,triunitur,2020/04/07,"Struggling, considering drugs I'm not a happy guy. Never have been. I live up in a household with an emotionally manipulative mom who drinks too much wine and a dad who was physically there but may as well be a brick wall. They have a dog and he is their kid, I guess. I am just in the way. I get yelled at, hit sometimes, everything is always my fault and I am never good enough. I guess I'm always going to carry that through life.

I've never been good at dealing with emotions. I shut down or I ignore them. Sometimes I want to die, but I'm still here because I'm a coward as well. I think a lot of people can relate to that.
The problem is is I'm vulnerable. I'd form a habit, be it alcohol, drugs or cigarettes if it gave me five minutes of not feeling like I'm a freak wearing someone else's skin who will never amount to anything until the day I die. So I say no. I don't know why. But I've said no so many times people stopped asking.

Whenever I'm offered a drink or a smoke or a hit of whatever, I say no. I make up some bullshit excuse and say no, and I usually lie and say I'm straight edged so they'll leave me alone. It's okay. Still a lie though.

But that's what I am. A liar. I like to square my shoulders and pretend to know what I'm doing.

I'm transgender. I can't come out because of home life and I think I'm depressed as well. I don't know. Even if I was, I'm not allowed to go see a doctor (even though I live in the UK and it's free) because like I said my parents are not... great with my mental health. Last time I asked for help they laughed at me. That shattered my confidence. I'm a few years away from moving out but I have the same freedom as a toddler. They stalk my social media, check my phone, scroll through all my chats and go through my rubbish. I'm writing this on an old phone I'm supposed to have thrown away. And yet we still maintain the appearance of a totally normal family. I don't think my family is normal.

So I don't cope well. I'm not going to kill myself- psyched myself out of that so I guess that's a plus (?)- but I still don't want to be here and I don't really have any healthy coping mechanisms.

And that leads me to drugs and such.

I've always told myself I'd never go that low. But recently my resolve has started to crack and I'm not proud. I have no friends at all. I'm completely isolated. I call 'myself the loneliest whale in the ocean' if I'm being poetic. Which I'm not, because it's pretentious. Music is my only outlet and it just isn't enough against this absolutely crushing weight.

I started looking for ways to get a hold of tranquilizers. I know I'm so sick of feeling, but I also hope that I'm not always going to feel like this. And I know if I start I'll probably regret it. It's just a matter of not starting.

How do I stop myself?",0.7361055276381876,2.6865637202680084,2.916965661641541,91.8714283919598,82.65159128978225,5.7890452261306535,22.01030150753769,6.961326702584282,0.5495445226130653,2179,72,489,27,60,740,258,597,0.20199999999999999,0.691,0.107,-0.9958,2,1,9,0,0,2,73.0,1,0,6,3,29,30,2,1,31,1,39,16,3,5,8,100,103,49,3,11,28,3,5,4,1,3,9,7,1,2,26,26,5,4,12,5,2,10,27,10,4,1,8,15,67,21,56,86,12,58,0,3,3,0,37,21,0,16,29,311,93,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06970007218501835,0.0,0.06754798596448212,0.0,0.05215620604259219,0.21707220798047747,0.0,0.0,0.04435166268011854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536702925682553,0.0,0.121943314012741,0.0,0.1225521935545179,0.0,0.0,0.15902940338175342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659665104866347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05618103485962998,0.06838166115784179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0420613396505496,0.06723869269883836,0.05617367029415452,0.0,0.13537559565876942,0.0,0.0,0.06675517200231815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277810402144074,0.22690259285649186,0.0,0.05448272764095268,0.14672686825054845,0.0,0.13477886062729827,0.0,0.08615405216340788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058615300883615225,0.0,0.122966741245013,0.0,0.09893118722545667,0.09318599687812247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05038861274771547,0.0,0.06814924921860346,0.0,0.222395302431762,0.10940645456501913,0.0,0.07190499845954801,0.21554070422463972,0.06457780080094534,0.0,0.06942763068220835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932553849662887,0.0,0.0,0.04371541990578598,0.0,0.06542072133760386,0.0647779221483215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215598408221964,0.0,0.17921532942432428,0.05316279645866175,0.0,0.06905829234404542,0.0,0.0,0.09213326850959028,0.12745229097158314,0.0,0.1151804583928384,0.0,0.05476815929325371,0.0,0.0,0.055447494418484,0.0,0.0,0.043534685834258284,0.06612258418954843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572616251914579,0.0,0.0,0.0763845764062534,0.0,0.06931826680258173,0.047944016422387735,0.0,0.2515074377990861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278030041206364,0.0,0.0,0.06843715061792388,0.0,0.0,0.04960255453914825,0.0,0.0,0.07241880793253305,0.0,0.0,0.0904303176864813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031791537633991,0.06240648728288019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04178143831697605,0.0,0.06439662943771532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407782421296075,0.20746143393939093,0.0,0.0,0.05197169226715157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648331611138993,0.055260477793751664,0.0,0.12900798977494166,0.0,0.1846514831144272,0.0,0.2083382885390504,0.10905325334962013,0.0,0.06818183758353685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253705362830005,0.12815613549104155,0.0,0.07606031489921576,0.0,0.0,0.06232026071588554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183033429312563,0.0,0.07693659007836819,0.10353679476917624,0.0,0.07942007839170387,0.2345615312092778,0.0,0.058850675049021535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04199937708765904
mentalhealth,Tom_3038_2,2020/04/07,"Socialy Broken Hello M18 here :)
My name is Tom and i have a real Problem with Talking to Others, like my Family. I feel like i cant connect to them and i often dont even Approche them anymore, like i dont fucking want to. But they dont Understand that, they just say stuff like.

""Ah thats Tom, dont worry he was always like that""

And then i feel shit about myself cus i tell myself, i cant even talk with them. 

I was Diagnosed with Depression with 17 but dont take any Pills or stuff because i feel like i dont want get addicted to that, i want myself to break free of this Cicle of Trying, failing, feeling shit, REPEAT.

with Friends i can talk about stuff that REALLY Intresstes me, like normal Teenage Stuff.

But with Parents i feel left out, almost that none of my Family even want me. It Hurts really Bad i dont fucking know what to do. Im a Loser overall, i never acomplished things, have bad grades in School, and have kind of everything you would descripe as an AntiSocial Person, im the most AntiSocial Person ive ever Met. I have really big troubles with handling emotions and thought, they get really Difficult after Time. They stick like Glue in my Head. Everything ever sayed or done to me, is kind of part of me. 

Honestly i have Thought about Suicide way to much.
Like someone say,""wow you gained a little to much Weight, you should lose some""
And now its Glued to my head always saying to myself, Dont eat that! Because if you do, other people wont like you!""

I dont know what to do anymore. I really dont wanna even exist at this piont, i wish i was never born in this World. If only i could erase eveything that links to my existins. That is a Thought i think about everyday.

Its impossible for me to feel ""Happy"" and ""Satisfited""
Im always in a ""hm ok idk"" mood or in a ""fck this world, fck everyone, no one understands me""

Im really inscecure about my hole fucking LiFe!

Im Miserbale at everything and never did anything in this World, nobody wants me to exist, myself included.

I just wanna end it all.",1.93895176420747,4.227003069478911,3.7620250559825728,85.59774677721965,80.33995037220845,6.710863644616595,22.73249409913454,7.8500785054351265,1.2872625915390667,1579,52,308,28,41,530,186,403,0.152,0.726,0.122,-0.9529,1,0,0,0,0,1,63.0,0,5,7,4,16,33,5,0,8,3,34,13,4,0,6,66,61,18,1,15,10,1,7,10,1,3,4,3,0,2,27,16,2,0,15,0,1,0,18,15,2,1,9,10,57,18,47,48,7,30,0,5,0,3,27,15,5,9,23,212,84,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05618610448588053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051609770356340436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286559902608325,0.0,0.0,0.035048903065706995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222747398605096,0.0,0.0,0.04241295067785917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606733640836614,0.06283649593843586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041150420639289774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044391245017909316,0.052311919096966385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052743217519785716,0.6040438530553932,0.0,0.0,0.052738190198323744,0.0,0.05797545651826835,0.04564905834959487,0.0,0.0,0.1361664857875437,0.0932415903391598,0.0,0.04924858832496023,0.13896223104334735,0.0,0.09717447179571703,0.0,0.15636074869385594,0.07364023746344611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0398196030788672,0.1429434361793371,0.05385494670381898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05486518770249453,0.0,0.0,0.10578962445234018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055174534728058736,0.0,0.2783597107403261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734176064561744,0.05664996827005179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599825804486211,0.0,0.03640415941572942,0.2517979440806705,0.05165652525194436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05765997077011896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577552148556525,0.0,0.11925225718776965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05049816435560929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03492477377726532,0.03919842055060934,0.0,0.0,0.05722896563467957,0.05581269504503833,0.0,0.03573128094040263,0.09000531485553936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04931672887270206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05866369589164699,0.198106699008687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16394640580800104,0.0,0.052161135871413966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10580994453492897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043669594610848066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23600344357596434,0.056376291266649774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0387515946570636,0.12427747104414574,0.045048149052221466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034240823011323564,0.033024690304326317,0.0,0.12275078352558615,0.03005333332457873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0349922126133745,0.0,0.0,0.10730971839363387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519978578543537,0.04090997793895062,0.0,0.06276171987278112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059268347663545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05234127576270852,0.0,0.03661247005974677,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,norannnnnnnn,2020/04/07,"I am not in the mood to be alone! Is it so dangerous when you feel that you are not able to be alone anymore? I don't mean loneliness in terms of feeling that there is nobody who love and care about you but i mean When it becomes very difficult to isolate myself for a while. I am always checking my phone and waiting for someone to talk to me. 

 I don't know if it is because this quarantine makes me feel that I am losing connection with the outside world or because I have a self-control problem. I have been thinking of shutting off my phone for a while to stop all this problem of losing control over myself, I am still afraid this might worsen it more though.",6.594786780383793,5.69032148507463,6.581684434968017,81.97067164179107,65.49253731343283,9.149680170575694,34.81449893390192,7.957251820313856,2.4935961620469085,525,21,106,5,7,167,80,134,0.22899999999999998,0.718,0.053,-0.9790000000000001,0,3,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,0,3,7,10,1,1,5,0,16,1,0,2,1,23,27,11,0,3,5,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,11,3,0,3,7,0,1,0,4,7,0,0,1,3,18,2,18,23,3,13,0,2,0,1,8,6,0,3,7,85,29,0,0.1581273768286711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.327544547345641,0.0,0.0,0.13157464484150266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568198677203774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19278596245901825,0.1746392642702213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122139931405194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547065979142424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23986185876191654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690267091687412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3538081745095141,0.0,0.0,0.14271613129285576,0.0,0.1055512519123422,0.0,0.0,0.34449413999082185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16774815815306762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30261308811265913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496134033176235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13398081324419991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12628072739683646,0.13220156750399967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12709679573630914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132163816818077,0.15535934487762515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047164632224229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pocoid,2020/04/07,"Young narcissist Hi guys,

I am **16 years old** and I had recently taken [**this test**](https://psychcentral.com/cgi-bin/narcissisticquiz.cgi). I was just curious, what will be my score. I had taken the test and I had scored **38 out of 40** (higher the score, more narcissistic you are, test say that narcissists score over 20). Later when I had retake test to be sure that there wasn't error, I took more time, I tried to put some questions to translator. I got 40/40, I was answering completely honest as I see world.

I **didn't even know** I was narcissistic; I thought my behaviour was normal, absolutely healthy. What's I would say is even worse, is that, I don't see any bad thing about my behaviour. I think if someone doesn't act as I do, they are less of human, because they don’t use every opportunity. They don't use manipulation for their good. They don't fight conflicts via other people, make them fight and you watch. I am angry when I am not leader in any sort of group, when it happens, I refuse to cooperate, because I know always and everything best and if I would helpful, still the leader would get positive attention not me. I like to yell at other people when they don't do exactly to the last point, what I said them to do. My life goal isn't something exact, I only want to be CEO of huge company and have many people under me, who I would command and rule over them (I didn't write rule by mistake, I mean it). Maybe some of you would say that this is psychopathic behaviour from book. But as I said **see this completely normal**.

I don't see that my behaviour is wrong, but I know it's bad because every everyone tells that Narcissistic behaviour is bad. Maybe take into account that I am young and this is MAYBE just phase. (but I would say my behaviour had shifted minimally). I still don't know, if I am narcissistic (wasn't officially diagnosed) but I think test said a lot and many of you in comments will tell me that this is definitely narcissistic.

So maybe I **would like to ""cure""** from this disorder, disease. But I want to know w**hy is this considered disease** and why should I **change my behaviour.** Finally, how would **I cure from this.**

Remember I realized there could be mistake and I want to make something about it. Hope you can help me.",0.9438495489063428,3.4743985345622117,2.6179067956123845,87.18086421756345,97.06451612903228,6.316038164470696,20.39839034205232,7.522901235351305,1.2429150126565849,1780,62,349,42,71,582,191,434,0.051,0.823,0.126,0.9725,0,0,2,0,2,0,109.0,0,5,9,3,16,16,2,0,5,0,58,2,0,6,3,73,89,28,0,21,12,0,0,2,0,11,2,8,0,2,27,13,0,2,14,1,1,3,15,8,0,0,21,13,68,8,35,52,7,29,0,0,5,0,36,11,0,9,17,235,95,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063910845186727,0.0,0.0,0.10446486074635296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19239572838814287,0.14046529043344252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806058075012688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125323421997899,0.0,0.16106455268610334,0.0,0.0,0.061325356654932175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795903531694227,0.0,0.0,0.08802922318017865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146261175027924,0.0,0.12942898882670367,0.07339383648721412,0.06903054896245525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413998395558321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04012928377080455,0.0,0.0,0.06442334599335234,0.061430793442770124,0.0,0.0,0.0760525148361636,0.0679215243388763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10296626951425204,0.0,0.0,0.07628819538817358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110597810836544,0.06260919876889229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05425213218260667,0.07504953040981747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529986062684441,0.0,0.0,0.10254057274273673,0.15574357604966607,0.3086579455451657,0.08366700010936784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15051209156148115,0.0,0.0,0.0805976256261459,0.0,0.0,0.058416343824222686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597480788798268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260888213455291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07721378153783047,0.08604312562751816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583915145712239,0.0,0.08700908505937148,0.0,0.2191874866383718,0.24432488543921324,0.0,0.0,0.24482579760754025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507961335222899,0.11826190900031325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267877338295108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239112512329543,0.0,0.057750451304567886,0.0,0.13426807135158886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051028170568029184,0.09843160190677687,0.0,0.06097738866684942,0.04478766817366752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533709660473703,0.05214794612844192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267580763737746,0.0,0.0,0.1359109729459836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930774634274063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827444815652182,0.4365005751194185,0.08397806367392867,0.0,0.049462171356910924
mentalhealth,Plaguey_Boy,2020/04/07,"16 and looking for help I haven't been feeling all there in my head lately and I had no clue where to go to talk about this. Lately I've been feeling more down than normal and my dreams are becoming more unnatural every night. Thinking about food or drink makes my stomach feel sick. Also, I've had this feeling like I need to scream but I don't know why. I came here wondering if there is anyone that would have any idea what is wrong with me and could help.",2.6837234042553213,4.449914340425536,3.1776063829787238,93.20875,75.80851063829788,5.976595744680853,21.324468085106385,6.6274283507984215,0.20077021276595766,364,9,79,3,8,113,67,94,0.138,0.768,0.09300000000000001,-0.3193,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,0,0,12,5,2,1,1,23,24,8,0,5,3,0,4,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,4,6,2,0,8,2,0,2,3,2,0,0,5,6,9,1,10,17,3,8,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,3,4,51,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14396659135889225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224237378758294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587824627569624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19882438553024046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059015903053842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373597656908327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763567770337716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15167952638281965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36410587565377056,0.12861048905635564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176879484544801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10231282799207814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18475843922498636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413350383852376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20322724946160345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989374881885048,0.0,0.4061539556480068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795152717337389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511763566930394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016863957321147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348687198454634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16894204634618054,0.1763870904801727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14469794304695235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535328285931724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16244531051699845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952303334498804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788518457134418,0.1968299843810528,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lolipop275,2020/04/07,Thinking about just ending here I'm 16 and thinking about ending it here. I'm thinking about ending it here because I lost my iphone6s. I know most of u are thinking why kill yourself over a phone. Because I have no job (parents won't let me get one and don't give me a lot of money) neither will anyone help me get another one. They also don't want me to have any electronics at all. Your probably still thinking thats no reason to kill yourself. The thing is I hate my life it's garbage for reasons I don't wanna say up here because that be paragraphs possibly pages long and the only light in it was having a iPhone now I have to use a TracFone. The only way I can get another iPhone is saving up until Christmas and maybe even up to my birthday which makes it minimum 9 months and max 11 before I can get another one.right now I'm so depressed I'm not gonna eat today and very much just thinking about ending it.,2.295966386554621,4.217331550264554,3.6051416122004376,89.0172549019608,77.41269841269842,5.928540305010892,26.46156240273887,6.794906146795322,1.147309741674448,729,29,147,7,17,238,110,189,0.151,0.8490000000000001,0.0,-0.9788,2,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,1,1,1,16,6,3,0,7,0,17,2,0,4,1,26,39,9,2,2,3,1,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,10,6,1,0,9,0,1,0,8,5,0,2,2,2,17,1,19,32,6,18,0,2,0,0,7,6,0,2,11,98,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634393875399167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342361603070936,0.33964932782634005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549545685772238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974533728708812,0.0,0.09187491001819696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299479995735402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048073658730162,0.0,0.0,0.3825191249084806,0.0,0.0,0.07131347128020296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256404384880431,0.10357510468729797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659847716854096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237032417326908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714402255232344,0.0,0.23890663616296756,0.0,0.059337741763477475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040711172411834,0.07626272975933812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555046046444393,0.0,0.0,0.1178625127077466,0.09179262498929136,0.0,0.0,0.07207112120612835,0.0,0.10847084041763316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618099197267064,0.0,0.07937071216825943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21949073626988755,0.16423280204362375,0.0,0.0,0.11988841963806587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172047205993335,0.0,0.0,0.11641041861068055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22202323298533985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09220618386122223,0.0,0.08586244430456551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0862253497265364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07173077675628492,0.4150986710012804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234337249301467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325181201537333,0.0,0.08908693801057516,0.06368377539043697,0.08570192643070983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742654743548967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ellereyn,2020/04/07,"How are you getting any work done right now? Hey everyone, 

I’m having a really hard time during this pandemic. I have assignments from school piling up and up and up. It seems like all of my teachers have added more work due to the pandemic and I feel so up in the air. I have become so depressed I can’t even look at my work. I have no motivation, I feel like the future won’t even happen, I feel like nothing is real, I’m crying until 3am each night and sleeping until 2pm, and I’m supposed to graduate and get to university this fall. How is everyone around me getting work done? Online school is so overwhelming on top of this pandemic which is already increasing my anxiety, OCD, and depression. Does anyone have any tips to help with motivation? I feel like I can’t function.",3.8075591397849458,5.352102825806455,5.358467741935487,79.65103494623656,72.35483870967742,9.03763440860215,27.755376344086017,9.516144504307137,2.5713118279569893,618,23,119,15,12,209,91,155,0.10400000000000001,0.77,0.126,0.3547,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,7,9,7,0,1,4,0,16,1,1,4,1,21,29,14,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,10,0,0,7,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,2,6,14,4,18,26,4,20,0,3,1,0,3,11,0,1,11,76,19,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570342594071073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17957606398223838,0.0,0.10100608098007728,0.0,0.0,0.09232163794126126,0.0,0.0,0.11753875597740936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582180382950424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14503377000173573,0.0,0.0,0.22744235506151936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554433776783495,0.27023440323384346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17441517012800167,0.0,0.0,0.2523293705226144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670425734306042,0.2829765592723039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069478323668463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675772995155248,0.0,0.11827703618358505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849998588137327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25802167692413897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11087578100925964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239054951692573,0.0,0.126690726297019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502842412375007,0.08458472340251827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11275679725236835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672520579337657,0.0,0.12019930928253755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13212991897944942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07699041675935578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3844909439456883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ItsAlex78,2020/04/07,"Help me find Christopher I was surfing through Omegle live chat through shear boredom of being in isolation and came across this kid called Christopher. He’s a 21 year old lad from Sweden and he’s very heavily depressed and suicidal. We got to talking about his problems and I tried my upmost hardest to convince him to add me on any sort of social platform but just as he was about to add me he said his Aunt was coming and that he had to log off quick. I really won’t be able to live with myself knowing that I could’ve stopped him from taking his own life if I’d of said something about adding me on a social platform sooner. I need to know that Chris is ok so please please please whatever you do today, share this tweet so we can find Chris and make sure he’s okay. 75% of all suicides are committed by men and when I seen that figure I was shocked to my very core. Please help us find Chris.",3.521813186813187,4.958052280219782,3.678901098901101,91.84109890109892,72.9010989010989,6.518681318681319,25.637362637362642,6.868970318607317,0.8625560439560442,713,23,151,6,14,219,115,182,0.078,0.741,0.18100000000000002,0.9701,0,1,1,0,0,1,9.0,3,1,0,0,8,8,0,0,2,2,12,1,0,1,3,31,23,13,2,3,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,2,6,14,0,1,6,1,0,2,1,3,0,0,10,3,23,5,27,10,2,15,0,1,1,0,28,7,0,2,6,86,29,0,0.12373588179214468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414464270284287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634816981072688,0.14152088515518474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658750584019573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879303313068986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657353367561052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33927706288054577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896288815709728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658751066496556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13600400932019124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739831261455472,0.0,0.0,0.2185221011378134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259466192112525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174858849721007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12983999332514892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5432993640793787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183985279792317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926837431438145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354023176322964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522662981201277,0.0,0.09525792699182713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344873770425536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27069394306865485,0.0,0.1166196042350852,0.0,0.09303398398720288,0.0994542147526275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11728714788205015,0.0,0.0,0.08400854150026778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488390305986618,0.0,0.0,0.20419012229675212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968185103390107
mentalhealth,mirantelope,2020/04/07,"Is it rude to tell people my dad died by suicide? My dad used a handgun and ended his life recently. I’ve found myself having to tell people my dad died a lot, but I am increasingly wanting to be honest with how it happened. Instead of saying “my dad died suddenly and unexpectedly,” I want to tell people “my dad died from suicide.”

This feels important to me. If we are more open about suicide, about mental health, maybe fewer dads or siblings or friends will die this way. 

I mentioned it to a coworker today who, after I said it, was suddenly in a rush to get off the phone with me. I feel bad for shocking him and don’t hold it against him if he didn’t want to talk to me anymore after that, but I don’t want to hide how my dad died and I want people to know suicide is a real possibility for some.",6.7696951219512185,5.163882798780492,7.658658536585366,76.66652439024392,65.52439024390246,10.151219512195123,33.91463414634146,8.841846274778883,2.6642463414634143,625,22,129,8,8,212,94,164,0.289,0.628,0.08199999999999999,-0.9939,0,0,0,1,0,4,15.0,1,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,6,0,11,2,0,3,0,30,24,12,10,7,6,7,2,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,9,8,0,1,4,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,4,4,21,2,25,18,4,13,0,0,0,0,22,3,0,6,7,88,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907295575591593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341148499061124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6220762860054365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884808547413731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10102386330718398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095340876956254,0.07718171290408778,0.0,0.052193099799694866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834034812616094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618795631381384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054901873059669946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07056161195214515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493055002099592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036196414454863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067468678367453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770295285741873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262110264382813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370692282477213,0.0,0.0,0.09863820205048238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502681740928452,0.07944368757059306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43709312908234826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029502513772263,0.2619483649891788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469256291395337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628065365647973,0.0,0.0,0.2946150669486988,0.07929516941549777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scud214,2020/04/07,"Recurring dreams I keep having these recurring dreams, they usually involve things that I want or that is wish to happen, the most common ones are dreams where I met some love interest, it’s always a different person, we talk and talk and talk and get along so well, in my dream they make feel the happiest a person can make another person feel. For once i feel loved, I had one of these dreams today just a minutes ago, I woke up and quickly checked my phone to see if she had texted me, only to remember it was a dream. This keeps happening, and every time I get pissed off it wasn’t real. This sounds stupid but, even though those dreams aren’t real, I genuinely feel like those people really understood me, I miss them. Why is this happening? Is my brain telling me something? How do I make it stop? I’m sick of waking up and being disappointed. Also idk if this is an important detail or not, but always in these dreams I’m not my age, for some reason it always takes place several years from now and I’m older, does this also mean something? I’m so confused.",4.4217384370015935,5.651377521531099,5.088019138755981,83.40080063795854,70.43540669856459,8.635534290271133,24.93811802232855,9.029198982220553,1.7817346730462522,838,23,165,16,15,270,123,209,0.107,0.723,0.17,0.8099,2,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,1,0,3,0,12,10,2,1,7,0,14,6,3,5,0,41,43,19,0,4,9,0,4,1,0,0,1,1,0,3,18,9,0,3,8,8,1,0,4,5,1,2,7,6,22,5,14,35,3,20,0,2,1,2,17,7,1,8,14,107,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09965963583408682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798154528872674,0.2806444837698698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178893747248816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12550556749452293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746214916517045,0.0,0.0,0.0983855106089866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425688658788464,0.0,0.0947244859825193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22738561186874245,0.08031777760880192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174767975086536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982561266284949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19986033356852104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492608924587906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029392772473474,0.0,0.22513742400662712,0.0,0.0,0.12246581930220735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973094616644528,0.1523667119988586,0.08550569995005555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794263503491372,0.2945004162608432,0.11746214916517045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559327803729326,0.07202353107426178,0.11559354590164712,0.0,0.0,0.12735772615968707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958965856051639,0.0,0.0,0.127010360825313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17310339272394742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939938965454956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453101371916241,0.27109337571223274,0.09826603883672937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469141606532609,0.0,0.11045882787555956,0.0,0.06555701137071679,0.0,0.10656752599203713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382231254909985,0.0,0.06631228015917356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108525706864983,0.0,0.10144776230482958,0.0,0.12928535080416334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07239921751433807
mentalhealth,rulingmaple,2020/04/07,"First time asking for help This is my first time posting and asking for help with something like this. For the longest time I have had this feeling that I dont belong and that people are just putting up with me or just using me as a fill in till something better comes along. I have always managed to hide and deal with it, but recently it has been putting strain on my relationship with my fiance. i come across as smothering her because i am scared of losing someone who so completes me. 

I'm trying to find ways to help deal with my self value and understanding. I am also working on trying to figure out ways to occupy my time and thus give her space to be herself.

thank you for any help with this.",6.165269784172661,6.100337136690648,6.127257194244606,82.07995053956836,66.12230215827338,8.388848920863309,29.605215827338128,7.645422480735847,1.748157553956834,558,17,109,5,8,176,86,139,0.086,0.767,0.147,0.7999,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,5,4,7,1,2,2,0,11,0,0,2,0,25,21,12,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,9,15,0,0,4,0,0,5,1,4,0,2,2,1,18,3,27,18,0,23,0,1,0,0,16,7,0,1,9,80,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736492580101704,0.11171221639594828,0.0,0.0,0.0912990674381882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510235282492828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08184155534778889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873902069785715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313002841580437,0.14076545311532945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768252447914969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15734769322834138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06788415276470121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270806731987315,0.2283971296680065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287911298703666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35995737962321656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06559097565570146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019875372293226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307659706538844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285806764606826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26992985765411165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256216021099734,0.144141305721267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441424190582504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14005887661947689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375515107847023,0.2067145244448224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12360540628020035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31314432874536685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823027883760364,0.0,0.0,0.13976581803467827,0.0,0.1159545652227742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213133222899494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774037764894458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Reinier_95,2020/04/07,"Urge to vomit to feel relief not guilt/food related Hi,

I was wondering if someone had similar experiences or knows a name for this ""condition"".

Sometimes I feel extremely anxious, upset or nervous and it makes me want to induce vomiting. As if all the stress and negative feelings would leave my body with making myself throw up.

I don't really think it's food related. Because these sensations don't occur after eating or overeating. 

The 1st time I felt like this was when a co-worker left our team and I felt sad she was leaving us and stressed because she could work really fast, so I was afraid it would have a very negative impact.

It doesn't always feel the same either...  
Sometimes all these negative feelings just keep building up in me, until I actually just feel physically nauseaus  
But sometimes its only emotional

Which in my heart, I know doesn't make sense. I heard that when you vomit, your body makes dopamine.... so maybe it's related to wanting to feel that?

I feel like I'm dealing pretty ok with this ipmulse/desire. Except for when I drink alcohol (and get upset/nervous) bc it also upsets my stomach and makes me more prone to give in to the desire to do this.",5.003756264837771,6.75505264125561,5.770725402268533,77.05332366130311,69.67264573991032,8.834502769717751,30.15800580321815,9.325443323948027,2.8883154312846213,941,38,162,20,17,307,132,223,0.133,0.7829999999999999,0.084,-0.9056,0,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,2,2,0,2,8,11,0,6,7,1,14,11,4,6,2,50,40,20,0,8,11,0,10,2,0,2,4,1,0,0,16,8,4,1,15,2,0,1,8,7,0,0,8,11,24,4,22,29,5,15,0,1,0,0,12,7,0,6,9,112,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.10041919602035278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10997279188943218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229207536024916,0.08562414644940551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11625192403371233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12545831685782152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22860569113740906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216025471017321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608922670063213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10080647912108393,0.0,0.1052962052959132,0.0,0.11575284530461387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065959319853073,0.0,0.0,0.416249740659834,0.07351444496702958,0.1976074356967856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488631965255964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05376295150630735,0.09871463409443763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219414150043888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146556298393564,0.0,0.0,0.11310639721497184,0.0,0.0,0.21792038298128705,0.11180520327170304,0.0,0.0,0.10054712880097988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.343445192747718,0.0,0.10338062755591823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826292335878625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469008753280384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184552832820698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08718999613072266,0.0,0.3053232593633486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357517490975264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593655483894145,0.0,0.0,0.060003992243024176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237805164724972,0.0,0.0,0.08490635384688397,0.12139057168996115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159470514109526,0.14983028141113788,0.0,0.0,0.14619971407073826,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WiseScallion,2020/04/07,"I don't know what is wrong with me. Depression? Anxiety? Bipolar? I started seeing a mental health professional for depression and anxiety after noticing my breakdowns of crying and sadness were becoming more frequent if not ongoing and beginning to have suicidal ideations. I am currently taking 100mg of Zoloft daily for this and continuing to go to therapy. 

I thought it was helping because I used to have monthly/bi-monthly breakdowns of crying and sadness over seemingly nothing. Since starting Zoloft those meltdowns were pretty much gone, but I had one again yesterday and I just don't understand. 

I don't know what triggers it, I'll go from being perfectly fine and having a good time to overwhelmingly sad. Like everything hits me at once and I breakdown even though there is nothing specific I am sad about. 

Does anyone else have issues similar to this? I feel like maybe I could be bipolar because my mood changes so much over literally nothing but I don't want to self diagnose.

I also don't want to change my medication necessarily because it really has helped with my day to day anxiety, but I feel like I'm missing something here... I guess I just want to have something reasonable to ask my therapist about because I do feel better but things just still aren't right. Thank you for taking the time if you read this far. <3",5.875939849624063,7.944012387755105,6.2479269602577885,73.2350053705693,67.9795918367347,9.729323308270676,35.75187969924812,10.064110947511567,4.1079387755102035,1085,56,176,28,19,349,140,245,0.15,0.722,0.128,-0.4283,1,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,0,2,13,18,0,1,3,0,24,7,0,3,1,37,51,17,1,6,10,0,3,3,0,0,7,0,0,1,10,10,0,0,9,1,0,3,7,9,0,1,6,4,27,8,26,41,3,22,0,8,1,0,6,5,0,4,17,120,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182828873743776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2348322315535095,0.0,0.0,0.07154716510813437,0.104842803188629,0.0,0.0,0.09565892024897253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24950250267509336,0.11300857423688153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049706687333096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21648998011294804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169721101010192,0.0,0.2247957319641898,0.1319807442588112,0.0,0.1762626410562916,0.1038564813290814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895442281564052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547838707758662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758389069337714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09196201428492314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552139307604407,0.14620025568197947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630592280411682,0.08582433072849335,0.0,0.0,0.11272117815702425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876539172247207,0.0,0.0,0.13717094373803893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679944025336346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124689453855818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499706888767062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027979888035428,0.0,0.0,0.10308044188109823,0.10311830196829093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08167386381238584,0.0,0.15043950151741592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29454727561731703,0.11649630007599455,0.0,0.108971484668304,0.06933724050531513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410006884721214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235146881712688,0.0,0.06555123268887679,0.10520588635009376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738394779360882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153880359964877,0.0931517249790676,0.10674601701397686,0.0,0.0,0.08464328700086238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575476876297793,0.0,0.0,0.14485059422980706,0.0,0.08171590172660947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192560591181226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15386949423565865,0.0,0.0,0.09420598765512983,0.11701615837702965,0.11880579350046222,0.06797937175992706,0.0,0.10053259289864122,0.08123365049129211,0.11933163627643605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065226621118524,0.0,0.08837489126624393,0.0,0.0,0.18105964711846895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118749887879688,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,domjeans,2020/04/07,"Can't get rid of the noise Full disclosure: I already take paxil for anxiety. I had to start earlier this year when my panic attacks got too bad for me to work. Before I started taking it, I was puking all the time.

But that's not what I'm here for. I have this incessant mental activity that will not shut up. I spend all day at work stressed out, sort of just panicking my way through the work day, using the momentum of it to not fall behind.

Then I come home. My brain is still overwhelmed, but my husband will probably want to watch a movie or something. But I'll dread it. The minute he turns on Netflix, my heart will sink. It's not that I don't want to, but it's so much work to sit there and watch something. I don't understand how it can be so exhausting.

There's so much noise. All the time. Someone's always talking to me. Something's always happening. Even if I sit in a room in silence, I feel like I don't have time to relax my brain because there's always something I need to worry about.

What is wrong with me? Is this an anxiety thing? I'm just so tired.",1.8779729729729733,3.7023026981981992,3.3029639639639647,91.1522837837838,78.32432432432431,6.602162162162162,23.71261261261261,7.554174236665415,0.9671812612612608,837,28,183,12,20,274,122,222,0.16699999999999998,0.7829999999999999,0.05,-0.9781,0,0,4,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,4,16,10,1,4,9,0,16,5,3,2,3,27,33,14,0,4,12,1,1,1,0,3,2,0,2,0,15,4,0,0,2,2,1,2,8,8,0,0,3,3,22,2,25,26,6,25,0,1,2,0,3,9,0,3,12,120,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13178393617862305,0.0,0.2981032740076105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827133280304309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585851745706515,0.0,0.0,0.09971146588834452,0.07279787411545141,0.0,0.101618392787548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666264454852413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287053378599018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15403320613145316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887638022350038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603827968126745,0.08531431704829946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06239249296269001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09551180552988113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560351023288536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14151434518302458,0.0,0.0,0.11978890281175128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583430210802121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12034818224588678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17557620907262114,0.0885490864845799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14011469913696226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875593174023306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10118494367566247,0.3677441823880525,0.0,0.0,0.16905345976463365,0.0,0.09536968749160606,0.0,0.13679624103955335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17957931405862138,0.0959859983421346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933794162010467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20890586689517845,0.13725676060860756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298956500158414,0.0,0.12432137174927828,0.0,0.10314131746797836,0.0,0.0,0.1408750854947811,0.09479075430888052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3477593590614371,0.12127772394402647,0.0,0.0,0.13056801055113573,0.0,0.07690314623932197
mentalhealth,nate_lamontagne-,2020/04/07,"I’m lost I applied to become a police officer I past the entrance test with a perfect score basically. 
Spent the last 8 months committed to becoming the best me, 
Working out everyday, running twice a week, volunteering and dedicating any spare time to them for meetings etc. 
I got a email this morning saying I was deferred for something that happened when I was a kid.. 
I realize there are lasting ramifications from previous mistakes but I was just a immature kid. 
Now I’m lost. Don’t know what to do with life anymore, I feel like I let my whole family down.. I’m embarrassed to even mention it to them because it’s all they every talk about.. 
I’m having mixed feelings about everything but also know I can’t talk to my friends or family about it",5.3622916666666685,6.603070645833334,6.496833333333335,74.1315,68.2361111111111,9.926666666666668,35.23333333333333,10.125756701596842,3.820596666666667,599,30,107,15,10,201,97,144,0.071,0.825,0.10300000000000001,0.6486,0,0,1,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,3,5,9,8,0,1,9,0,9,1,0,0,3,17,22,6,0,1,4,0,2,1,1,0,1,1,0,2,6,4,0,0,5,0,1,1,2,4,0,1,7,3,16,4,17,14,4,12,0,2,0,0,12,2,0,1,10,72,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098458019419584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138432715611653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243787124320386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984621783782414,0.361791279841105,0.0,0.0,0.17188983107351186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1826716232637821,0.10818321740501323,0.0,0.13800201074275792,0.0,0.1472058871177669,0.0,0.308817458207622,0.0,0.16563653698606326,0.11701319562134968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654546386939206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13099960207486716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484092036024945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18003184257566396,0.26702504282618644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16748864353803594,0.1156912898130734,0.08002060586073066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35759711614831924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073738836980914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15635820870352315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13025414851324585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609525411785555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26329996627787844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550856142005687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13138424012945055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18286816571994066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924268785968738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mystical_Typewr1ter,2020/04/07,"I feel like a complete failure (M21) I am 21, and I feel like I have achieved nothing in my life. I studied for nearly three years, and my first bachelor degree I attempted (chemistry) I failed, and I feel like I might fail my current one. I have worked the same retail supermarket job for nearly 3 years, and honestly kinda glad I haven't been fired yet, so yay I guess. I still live at home with my parents, and haven't even learnt to drive. I have no talents, I have been learning guitar for 6 months now, and yet I still can't play a single song from start to finish. I tried to pick up drawing, but my drawings look like they were done by an 11 year old. My love life is also crap. I have been in 2 ""relationships"" I guess, I don't know what to call it tbh, and combined they lasted for 3 months. I just feel like I have achieved nothing in my life and don't know what to do. And it's not like I peaked in high school, it feels like I have never been relevant. Silver lining is that I got a fair amount of friends. But frankly I don't know what to do and where to go from here. Btw, since rules require it, I live in Australia.",2.5748841607565005,3.7509365617021295,3.410602836879433,93.86361111111113,74.87234042553192,6.243498817966904,23.69385342789598,6.42735559955562,0.3848250591016553,872,25,201,6,18,277,127,235,0.057,0.7609999999999999,0.182,0.9803,3,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,2,8,11,17,1,0,5,1,25,5,1,1,1,32,40,14,0,0,4,1,6,7,1,1,3,1,1,0,8,11,0,1,9,3,1,2,9,3,0,3,7,8,36,14,25,32,3,30,0,2,1,1,7,11,1,4,24,130,44,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983225495242332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470403600859334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777848285561693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11495514247996168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419455292441532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28399342117042314,0.401251781174188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554996210197957,0.0,0.0,0.08678780629394749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06384114510411452,0.0,0.08984255730566468,0.0,0.2474938134715391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868544750550072,0.11267865062063452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147266721259634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18520500303739065,0.0915659755151342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23803128796201375,0.38415987740921503,0.0,0.1983833006456196,0.0,0.09433100338795228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138446168457818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916702449024134,0.0,0.0,0.17932545016273754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866377445335951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21557211543877508,0.0,0.11787405620543448,0.0,0.07611940519441933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473194105095145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060305940811628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368648118150293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292259993693104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07950951750081467,0.0,0.17941774979863298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626638979979923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177939358314126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21701532971745494
mentalhealth,RaccoonsAndAGoodRomp,2020/04/07,"Staying Sober Hi there!

So I am sorry if this sounds petty or like a pitty party (it autocorrected to potty party and I am still sitting here laughing on the toilet) but I was looking for some validation or support today.

Those of you who are recovering addicts, can we all just agree that this pandemic is making it SO hard not to cave?! I have been sober for just over a year now and this the loudest my inner voice has been trying to rationalize why it would be totally fine to star abusing again because when else am I going to have the time. I mean really, I just miss how drugs and alcohol could make a 500sqf apartment feel like 500acre.

I am fully aware that this all sounds stupid but can someone please just be like, I feel you man, this sucks.

Thank you!",3.839608501118569,5.611966422818792,4.616258389261748,84.08174776286356,72.69127516778524,7.114317673378077,25.168344519015665,7.793537801064563,1.3261673378076062,603,19,117,8,12,194,101,149,0.121,0.6990000000000001,0.18,0.8405,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,1,3,0,0,13,10,2,0,6,0,18,3,0,3,3,26,29,12,0,3,10,0,3,3,0,1,3,3,0,1,12,4,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,3,7,14,7,10,22,4,14,0,1,1,0,7,4,1,4,10,86,26,0,0.0,0.2314976944096493,0.0,0.21299703525953675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20880571860187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910406908836448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15599795849976006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22658302193366106,0.0,0.16321798155761974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19758370393948044,0.1395821297725307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104103980140433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750253871501856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28636376946424785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640730705037578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26084022798710554,0.0,0.0,0.2128300905659856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144725922588169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251677792935071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16554794585258945,0.0,0.0,0.2187160173873761,0.0,0.2082529909480395,0.1560336477672641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22171906836678276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988302869771994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392978666834848,0.0,0.1852008694140952,0.0,0.0,0.13265268364873242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17630336825472326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879495023924154,0.0,0.0,0.12582067476688438
mentalhealth,HopefullyHopefull777,2020/04/07,"How to get rid of intrusive thoughts? For the last 6 months I have been experiencing frequent thoughts about statues ,I try to break the statues mentally but they keep coming to the point where I can't continue normal daily tasks since these thoughts are annoying, recently i have been diagnosed with OCD and am on a medication ,but is there something I can do to get rid of these thoughts?",17.176250000000003,9.101675236111113,14.511111111111116,55.14500000000002,53.58333333333334,18.844444444444445,58.22222222222222,14.554592549557764,7.587672222222222,315,16,57,8,2,98,52,72,0.057999999999999996,0.9420000000000001,0.0,-0.6007,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,4,1,1,0,4,0,10,2,0,1,0,12,18,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,6,1,6,0,10,12,0,10,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,5,38,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1851891114472722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21820356469279506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246398440349948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910870704417501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752401155092678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2165730976124056,0.21665264205565365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715976508931289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21063802787299352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032287450159775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21227011242434587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17783644038912538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16550467823474493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6826910322156335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14595957595387254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,daddyskitten6942,2020/04/07,"Klonopin for self harm Hey y'all! 
Hope this message finds everyone in high spirits and good health. 
I am have been taking half of a .5 klonopin for anxiety for a year now. When I feel an attack come on, I take my half. It takes about 30 minutes before the fog clears and I can think rationally. 
Let me get to it... about 4 months ago, during an anxiety attack I had this uncontrollable urge to bang my head. It's as if my brain tells me that if I bang my head it will all be over. I try to take medicine and calm down before it gets to that point, but I have had a few bruises on my forehead :/ 
The scariest one happened a few days ago. I woke up from deep sleep, instantly banged my head on the nightstand, and went back to sleep like it was nothing. I remember doing it like my life depended on it. I woke up to blood on my pillow, and i realized what had happened. 
This symptom is rather scary. I am ashamed to tell my therapist about it.
I am also on 150 xl wellbutrin 1x daily. 
I am just wondering what this head banging urge is all about. The klonopin helps, if I catch it in time, but any tips on what else I can do?",2.285960355434039,3.78323407359308,3.3524447482342232,92.68174982911829,76.22943722943722,6.767919799498746,24.712007290954666,7.475848149327749,0.91879567099567,865,29,197,11,19,278,130,231,0.098,0.83,0.07200000000000001,-0.722,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,0,0,10,10,2,2,10,0,20,12,9,1,3,24,36,13,0,5,7,0,1,2,0,1,3,0,1,1,19,6,0,0,6,0,0,3,0,5,0,3,8,1,29,5,30,25,4,28,1,0,0,0,7,16,0,6,11,131,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036418074863462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918575096463842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811214794161213,0.0,0.17574284156932227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613510701892905,0.0,0.08832410504314447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19548333224182585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12822734299738706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894603812531877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407843104107377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595497946597574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975844265205527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580792020382609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10498454121241184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002445715433373,0.0,0.0,0.09634332343284316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031495038493444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4715385688628881,0.12209613782096272,0.0,0.0,0.07699159717277422,0.12136119309145604,0.0,0.11408687594632468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174572584547374,0.08113255586460187,0.11223448689706586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09168415774985222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102160781998412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783550575042954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858456523366936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301196684868833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198292600134546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298959349027008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938872985972597,0.3454567795347211,0.0,0.2007941690309752,0.0,0.0,0.13336713367588815,0.0,0.0736008624846652,0.0,0.0,0.0669787129824607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798580410165881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648101812397044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456620712393855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396930257582869
mentalhealth,uniquely_ugly,2020/04/07,"how to mute memories? for a while I am troubled by the ever-recurring memories. I wouldn’t say they’re important just memories from various moments in life whose reflection makes me feel negative. Sometimes when I think of a moment from the past I frown or sigh. I’m afraid it’s gradually getting stronger. I would like to get rid of it, because it prevents me from concentrating and also makes me feel bad (unexplained shame, resentment, etc.)

sorry for grammar",5.428571428571427,7.772929476190478,6.087619047619048,72.79071428571429,69.71428571428572,10.514285714285714,35.80952380952381,10.608840637214634,4.609138095238095,372,20,61,12,7,121,63,84,0.19899999999999998,0.695,0.106,-0.8807,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,1,2,4,0,3,1,0,3,0,13,11,6,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,3,8,1,11,9,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,6,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22099226253706133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307357655721012,0.16845678745571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3081966996919056,0.0,0.2499690431685649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794557421422019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887567543299153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19518999758381392,0.13500775978768914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689236411673141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638016952560708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21975990564770406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27331136320038857,0.3093445751786155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17707012946225167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19630690715554985,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tearizonatea,2020/04/07,"I have a boyfriend who disappears. I have a boyfriend. He is amazing with me whenever we talk. We’re always laughing and smiling about stupid things that aren’t even important, even when I am in a bad place (I got diagnosed with bipolar 1 year ago). He’s always caring for me and for everyone around him even if it comes at his own expense. My boyfriend, let’s call him John, has a lot of family issues. And I don’t mean like his family fights sometimes. I mean the kind of issues that can result in the suicide of one of his family members if it gets too out of hand. So, sometimes when John and I are on FaceTime or we’re out together, if he gets a text that his family is fighting or if anything tells him that they are, he always has to hang up and leave. Which, of course, makes sense. John always wants to protect his family. So he leaves. I’m okay with it because I understand the situation. But I can’t help and get sad sometimes because he’ll leave and I won’t hear from him for hours. I’ll text him and I might not get a response for 18 hours, a whole day, or two. And when he does answer my text, or he calls me and I ask what happened, he doesn’t get into it at all and so I never know what is going on. I know I can’t complain because he’s trying his best with his situation, but I still feel sad and anxious because I’m worried about him. I don’t know what to do because I can’t complain to him, but it is making me feel very anxious sometimes. I know I’m not being a good girlfriend even though I try really hard, but I don’t know what to do.",3.1188189289501587,3.869171070121953,4.4699098621420985,88.41570519618244,73.0548780487805,7.533616118769884,26.45599151643691,7.7425588080867325,1.2842649522799583,1213,40,270,15,23,403,146,328,0.124,0.807,0.069,-0.946,1,0,0,0,3,1,36.0,1,0,1,1,16,16,3,0,11,1,26,3,1,3,2,55,55,31,1,5,14,0,4,1,1,3,2,1,0,0,16,22,0,1,11,0,1,4,12,8,0,2,1,5,43,8,33,49,5,26,0,2,0,0,39,12,0,10,11,176,59,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715171894885884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685260293761037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822889270291929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0663920577069154,0.07182153934938215,0.07542410478394743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06736371172222784,0.2459062737777648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466777966138307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476484430887486,0.0,0.08225775995901834,0.0,0.0,0.06949793507630272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520313707207398,0.0,0.0,0.08188762856478983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060285888329315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131512436099812,0.0,0.0,0.07709237546072853,0.0,0.0,0.3802855634887603,0.0,0.08158759439011186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107576030562136,0.0,0.04585181437204039,0.06766983462734172,0.06452647823861234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134429683492376,0.0,0.0722726622189224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093125408073416,0.0,0.0540775267318676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15890540215939306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684161216031108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084014908810224,0.22169572632703055,0.0,0.0,0.2562826795447042,0.0,0.08249988657442825,0.0,0.039415752421614735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859051950302289,0.0,0.0,0.10770790453525814,0.0,0.0,0.17576647017840155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558781765715517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06222472628722686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054670273087875726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429252936030762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051685122831980415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18137346680730349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191749286962946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644304652227009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824988413341417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648468364604157,0.07051712421946918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0535996355114904,0.0,0.07926684517506342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955167994631393,0.0,0.07881179639928679,0.08398982978354995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656873969768058,0.04758664694961588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007537831388998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193358267585459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051954720830190634
mentalhealth,slashleyyy89,2020/04/07,"Nice weather=anxiety I live in Northwest Indiana/Chicago area. Our weather has just started to be nice spring weather. Is there anyone else that gets terrible anxiety with weather changes?

I don’t know i can’t explain it. Something about the way the air smells, or just how all 5 senses are affected. Similarly this happens when it becomes fall as well. I think something about how it’s perceived as time to be social, and have fun with the nice weather. Fall is my favorite time of year so maybe i feel pressure to be happy at that weather change. 

I don’t know.., it’s just so odd. I’m bipolar and i had my first bipolar, severe depressive phase at around age 22, and it was from june til October. I hated summer, the sun, being alive. I don’t know.. like do i have seasonal affective in a different way or does my body just remember trauma..",2.492005021520804,4.97430060365854,3.785767575322815,85.10299139167866,79.54878048780488,6.785652797704447,29.15925394548063,7.928766900206844,2.212134576757532,665,32,124,12,17,217,103,164,0.124,0.727,0.149,0.6536,1,0,2,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,0,1,14,12,1,1,5,0,17,3,1,4,1,25,28,13,0,0,6,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,8,0,0,2,4,5,1,1,2,2,14,7,17,22,1,23,0,1,0,0,3,7,0,2,13,79,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558127876378102,0.0,0.0,0.11690907780938935,0.17131462046342327,0.0,0.14884211193181573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846576056314726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18571983978813933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3537476836674872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400782188220926,0.0,0.0,0.1746868446947413,0.0,0.0,0.1463165328926316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13967289117285409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08454058466629813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422189575317046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735431467703285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478530801678196,0.17798591084812335,0.0,0.16507390219713075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27566376670586024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816847409142197,0.0,0.14763933751960234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797336489179449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894033055622779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18888671230522106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704378135623433,0.0,0.2574351456687578,0.0,0.0,0.11834395790493372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713404675047634,0.0,0.0,0.19498957826600866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26542877154541106,0.0,0.0,0.1503315300118416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767035130750084
mentalhealth,thespian-lesbian,2020/04/07,TW: attempted suicide a few days ago i tried to kill myself by swallowing a ton of my anti-depressants. if you havent figured it out by now i didn’t die. the next morning i was super dizzy to the point where i couldn’t walk straight and i fainted outside my bedroom. i’m at home with my parents and they took care of me all day but they don’t know it was from the pills.  i’m pretty much better now but i don’t want to take my anti-depressants.  it makes me feel nauseous thinking about it but i can’t tell my parents why and i don’t know what to do. that’s all,-0.4812195121951248,1.6246044552845549,1.7104390243902436,97.40468292682928,89.81300813008129,4.5808130081300815,20.39512195121951,6.079149491110277,-0.03127707317073192,440,15,103,4,15,147,77,123,0.08199999999999999,0.784,0.134,0.7269,2,0,0,0,0,2,9.0,0,1,2,3,4,4,1,0,5,0,10,3,0,1,2,19,21,7,3,3,4,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,6,5,1,0,5,0,0,2,7,1,0,0,4,1,19,3,13,16,5,13,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,6,68,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17129195617511214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17090144043606956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19701686705979046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24924232445264374,0.0,0.3328675756281709,0.0,0.2005483444921139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770587143202704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938313518901436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21378688060385395,0.0,0.21239478178475565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898645623029195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205061222479995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055085598805044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4291311730238304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18267037421131094,0.0,0.0,0.1965903683970717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21136869881962525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528933982385794,0.0,0.16889668396887486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12381775497665452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21469218245237065,0.13119448411257967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397553374374116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17436533366137896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NZSISYT,2020/04/07,"not sure what this is Hey everyone, I have moments where I relive my very cringe or awkward moments and it’s very annoying.

It can sometimes keep me up at night is very annoying",3.5124761904761925,5.518538914285713,4.46857142857143,83.80476190476192,74.14285714285714,8.095238095238095,31.666666666666664,8.841846274778883,2.8056666666666668,142,7,27,3,3,46,28,35,0.259,0.741,0.0,-0.8321,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,4,2,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,5,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,2,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,3,18,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938060271990554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732983616975818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885449379785822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041011423677368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897920301611485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7610984936968272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,YoWifesTennisCoach,2020/04/07,"Just a rant. Damn, ten years ago when my Grandma (schiz) died my mom went down a rabbit hole of conspiracy theories and all that shit. Since then I became aged and moved out. Since then she’s crazy into the bible in a “I understand it and nobody else does” sort of a way. I can’t have a bloody conversation with her that isn’t gonna end up on NWO or whatever, especially with that CoVid shit going on. Like i didn’t want to invite friends when i was younger cause she’d be listening to that shit on youtube and would make me very embarrassed in front of friends.
I was t too far from jumping on that boat myself.

Now I live in another country where I moved to catch up with my dad and who was never there when I was a kid. I’m here with my sister too. Now nobody wants talk to my mum, cause those conversations are extreeeemely taxing. 

This is where my dillema comes in. My mother is living in another country on her own now. Putting all her thruth up on facebook(honestly breaks my heart to look at that shit) my sister doesn’t wanna talk to her. My dad even more so. Im the only one who’s able to at least listen to her for a bit without losing my shit. But it still throws me off the rails like nothing else. I mean i got off the phone to her a while back and I’m still agitated and confused. She doesnt have any contact with her side of the fam and is pretty much alone. 

Now I feel like an absolute shit cause thats my mother. She raised me and put food on my plate and i know she shouldnt be alone like tha and i love her, shes my fucking mom. But FUCK that conspiracy shit is pushing my buttons like nothing else. Im a very calm and keen person but that shit, oh boy that shit just throws me right out into the stratosphere.

I don’t know what to do, im regular on this sub myself so its like double trouble.idk what to do about her. It’s like something i cant do anything about. But if i stop talking to her in concern for my own nerves i feel like an absolute fucking bell end leaving her like that. Idk what to think nor what to do, but i sure feel like shit with that",2.24399897593446,3.774070760368666,3.304293394777268,92.84469406041988,76.41935483870971,6.4812083973374275,22.19380440348182,7.1686216300943375,0.4628317460317457,1626,44,371,18,36,522,204,434,0.134,0.765,0.1,-0.9352,0,2,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,0,1,24,33,14,2,17,0,28,16,11,4,4,57,53,28,1,6,10,9,3,10,2,3,0,2,0,3,25,23,1,1,8,0,1,13,11,17,0,2,7,6,58,16,57,40,9,66,0,1,1,4,43,31,14,4,30,238,83,1,0.06319690720918493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056020245157756096,0.0,0.0,0.13090587335743206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04297606401653471,0.1325349348973558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052005669907690635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048594520731585086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899465481696537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947618962793354,0.0,0.05443853972412502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06558841217824038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05530403937520011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15837872016978122,0.0,0.11194740390298967,0.0,0.0,0.04174096118743965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09586276541868853,0.13544364941274256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641795105044666,0.0,0.0976515474862197,0.1752735671204869,0.0,0.0,0.035916258740277936,0.0,0.05054433984252791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748886393241288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047905132889333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0694627349205257,0.0,0.0,0.06691639982148087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30874816663322696,0.0,0.1116080537734466,0.0,0.053069485507918526,0.07070117402426519,0.0,0.0,0.057037676128281464,0.0,0.04218442629415782,0.0,0.0,0.06883995875899618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803090784610282,0.0,0.13433662197103555,0.04645699832809109,0.0,0.04874135080547225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127827379445155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04282385987375752,0.048064095694290036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055181101756714784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06429397432999648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270606936962533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396981345460943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6487071708626905,0.10455426940451464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04865206669116725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009382634640562,0.052835444197062126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05956233713998092,0.0,0.0,0.15238584047533327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040494026360374816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06579020916339902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428813392623501,0.07455034649476648,0.05016276336875136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058584166125634524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06091956336276143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044893269673556835,0.0,0.0,0.04069673625072293
mentalhealth,itsyyo,2020/04/07,"why do i have a self destructive mentality? one week i want to be skinny, so i starve myself for a period of time that makes me drop and faint at some point. 
one week i don’t care that my body isn’t perfect so i eat everything in front of me.
i know some stuff i do makes me really really sad and i still do them anyway, with no one pressuring me to do them and the longest i’ve been avoiding doing those ugly stuff is 2 months (which i was really happy in), then i break down and convince myself to continue doing ugly stuff.",4.025415584415583,4.285630554545456,5.771298701298702,81.67409090909094,70.72727272727272,9.558441558441556,23.89610389610389,9.606745405546679,1.7807922077922078,411,9,88,9,7,142,68,110,0.22399999999999998,0.659,0.11699999999999999,-0.9173,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,1,4,8,1,2,3,0,13,4,2,2,1,13,18,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,5,2,1,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,3,2,0,19,4,11,15,2,16,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,2,8,68,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869176650833892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17156948202784342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721892463667767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123639843548276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17913385511974875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924805658521827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22465223221037464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695835038383197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431699061120306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34208628246188594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15907603218436986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234074119175966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554947318257427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343861241854767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5779102620391168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09812359499839696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925405667082407,0.0,0.26996310646821314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184369960982105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seekingDth,2020/04/07,"I don't know what i feel First of all i have never done something like this so sorry for my bad English I'm only starting to learn.

Im 24 years old. I have a girlfriend and few friends .
I don't have a job right now
I just have the feeling to die all the time. Its like im soo stressed all the time and i can't sleep, i tried telling my girlfriend about this she said it'll be ok but its not . I'm afraid to tell her more because i can't deal with a breakup now.
Did anyone ever had this experience ?how did you deal with it?",-1.1456410256410263,0.8597956324786367,0.7648205128205134,103.47184615384614,92.67521367521368,3.4618803418803417,18.056410256410253,4.604124745555138,-0.981865641025641,407,12,104,1,15,132,74,117,0.10800000000000001,0.8440000000000001,0.048,-0.6447,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,7,7,0,2,6,1,14,1,1,1,5,17,21,5,1,0,3,0,2,2,3,1,0,1,0,0,8,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,5,3,14,4,8,14,5,11,0,0,0,0,11,1,0,0,12,66,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12205127771297447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574417918206975,0.10640568077734296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3599122536616069,0.0,0.0,0.18115810171444602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17862797352923115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15789287337920566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707459945154256,0.0,0.0,0.1765181382056012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484744025613871,0.0,0.0,0.13485895133432274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3770936501784309,0.0,0.17321658012433344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959295764311167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17055522436826712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462577143842858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831636526858096,0.0,0.0,0.13275516280126934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14906701703267414,0.16603955085033545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746787188266093,0.0,0.0,0.1343791647571021,0.0,0.19539741089573304,0.1235492704463672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19994948111411506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051334353435087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20356611833755345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11850979751256713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240618945186727
mentalhealth,greatspaceadventure,2020/04/07,"I'm tired of fighting Where to even begin a post like this...

At the center of my mind is a black hole, sapping all my willpower, all my motivation, all my desires. Life is about taking risks, but i cannot seem to stop focusing on guilt, regret, and pain over my past actions (even though for a long time I have felt like I have not even been able to control my own two hands) long enough to leave my minimal comfort zone.

My family is there for me, but I can't communicate what I feel for some reason, so their support feels vacuous to me because I cannot share my real concerns and vulnerabilities without being judged. My mind and my life are a mess and a string of mistakes after mistakes, and the world is a horribly harsh and judgmental place. I barely have any friends I keep in touch with anymore, and I am honestly just tired of myself, and of the innumerable demands of life that I'm just too stupid to keep up with diligently. I know life isn't 'supposed' to be fun or satisfying, but I honestly have such little interest in what's going on around me that I cannot put any work toward long term rewards without being totally distraught at how boring and unsatisfying any of this feels, even when things do go well for me.

​

Sorry for the rambling incoherent post. I guess I just need to vent somewhere. I don't even really understand what I'm venting about. What I do know is that it's massively tiring to feel this 24/7.",10.484435457780652,6.937024334519575,10.036072468456812,68.60814299579424,60.1032028469751,13.207505661598187,40.84794564865739,11.022393298168332,4.2668761565836295,1142,43,220,21,11,373,155,281,0.165,0.675,0.16,0.3386,2,0,0,0,2,0,33.0,0,0,1,4,20,23,2,3,10,0,23,9,1,4,4,52,44,17,0,5,10,0,7,2,1,0,8,0,0,0,12,12,0,4,11,0,0,4,9,11,1,1,2,8,33,12,38,39,8,31,0,1,1,0,4,15,0,4,12,155,45,2,0.10168133206570544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017168081118002,0.1235539480362404,0.20744037781838653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100840558820201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051794323274824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619839962552511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404426005084778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506399715724514,0.0,0.3357978042495818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09585611046473737,0.0,0.20565254669842065,0.0,0.09763002454528558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07855874492251412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155756885203148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201345092511493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18075807982999406,0.0,0.0,0.1117628018134962,0.0,0.0,0.10766584903225464,0.0,0.0,0.28728212764899186,0.0993527254496662,0.10191140737423826,0.0,0.2699543374596932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053383185937893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07539541932724023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819610638486582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706633693925958,0.0,0.0,0.1062353502403277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19476521760535986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022178232983994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573561676735182,0.06513966502060317,0.10454534436548643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925668658288627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138239264742883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501014659558705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538677064986193,0.0,0.0,0.07645170731549958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06755255886292587,0.0,0.09990139249023433,0.0,0.05929120242712474,0.3506031998439659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932788655278138,0.10585385266517493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142372896413703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960343512090872,0.0,0.07402522076265364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235539480362404,0.0
mentalhealth,Rantfromcinemaworker,2020/04/07,"Shit scared of going to a psychologist cause I don't want to know what's wrong with me. So I eventually built up enough courage to tell my GP that I'm feeling depressed a couple of months ago, sent me for some bloods, I was just low on Vit D but have been supplementing and it's come back to normal levels, he has now sent me to see a psychologist under the care scheme free of charge (so greatful to have it).  

Like Ive only shared little bits of my mental health with some of my exes but they seem to freak out and I've kinda hidden it away. Like the main one that is always noticible is that swing from being extremely sociable to struggling to even get out of bed let alone leave the house, which occurs several times a year. Usually during these times where I'm not leaving the house I struggle with some suicidal ideation. 

One ive struggled with my whole time during school was difficulty concentrating, like when I used to be in highschool I would consistently distract other kids, never study and still manage to get pretty high grades, without studying. When I moved out of home for my first year of uni things just ran so out of control, I couldn't go to class, I couldn't study even if I knew I had to. My assignments were constantly late. I moved back home where I was able to get a bit more support by staying with my parents and changed course.  Ive currently completed my current course, with a distinction average, with barely having to study and now completing my honours on a subject I thoroughly enjoy but it just doesn't feel real that I'm doing it. Like Ive barely studied and I somehow made it to the top of my class. Like 90% of my time studying as was looking for away to pass the time while I pretended to look busy. still struggled with deadlines not having my parents ride me for them like I did when I was in highschool. 

At work focusing is like a million times harder and I really get distracted but I kinda know that if I don't get things done I'm not gonna have a job, I feel like the people I manage get annoyed at me cause I have the tendency to get distracted and then be overly productive. Recently had one of the other managers make the accusation to my boss that I'm taking drugs. The same on I was insistent that was trying to get me fired.  I also have these weird tics when I'm at work which I'm sure gets incredibly annoying, consistently have to make these clicks in chirping noises when I'm not with customers.   These tics be come really apparent when I have high energy and being really productive.  Productivity is really erratic and high for weeks at a time and low for a couple of weeks. Usually sinks up with not wanting to leave the house. 

I think I'm absolutely terrified to tell the psychologist this cause I'm scared that I actually have a mental illness and there is something wrong or, worst comes to worse there isn't really something wrong with me and I'm just faking it.",4.7382229965156775,6.014968571428572,5.51425087108014,80.46367595818815,69.73170731707317,8.944947735191636,27.937282229965163,9.310311815833133,2.3279951219512203,2336,80,450,48,41,761,256,574,0.17,0.718,0.11199999999999999,-0.9877,6,1,3,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,2,6,27,39,3,9,25,0,47,5,2,9,3,82,96,33,1,8,17,2,4,8,0,2,3,0,3,1,27,31,0,1,8,1,1,12,13,22,0,5,18,8,55,18,79,68,11,79,0,3,4,0,11,30,1,10,44,298,82,14,0.06134114634004181,0.0,0.059860110261142185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05437522511746433,0.0,0.0,0.06353092808647892,0.0,0.04905449256618567,0.051040747691694116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11526405242705914,0.0943351103449925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13393728917142456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254138686677088,0.1890427634629312,0.06489079928201871,0.15851989816696602,0.12863004974677258,0.06628798735211296,0.06879931156389994,0.0,0.1357456233960123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052833039458615776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06277328989698233,0.0,0.0,0.07113625522938719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06338180169126602,0.0,0.0810304972709364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304778005424663,0.043822127201866436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052176747740700434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2884339548020037,0.0,0.06972317414463579,0.0,0.0,0.06762883039316606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520277011814415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944308669126628,0.1230603424608488,0.0,0.0,0.2123383411693515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608716226483379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742297963784251,0.0,0.06919548490383651,0.1948542510353243,0.0,0.06272547812250938,0.0,0.2397454851260928,0.06147994353007885,0.0,0.0,0.1030222275263126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05804247583381735,0.08189138300757094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12363489583833638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048961917779948835,0.13039186173899545,0.0,0.0,0.0473100736191604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060101299454682934,0.0,0.06983730167451807,0.0,0.0,0.12469904484407204,0.04665270592951922,0.0,0.0,0.13622416755073893,0.0,0.0,0.042526227301567285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06240599836800258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.069819653820955,0.1964835453762601,0.0,0.0605669817597572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282637707176282,0.062080514943629386,0.048880951768024095,0.05584267581563659,0.0,0.06929803530111453,0.0629658052220939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09444682261965566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538150029926046,0.09797423740949272,0.0,0.0,0.2565083389814953,0.0,0.06709725802508258,0.06960920594120774,0.0578133044828413,0.0,0.046120908047857886,0.0,0.10722973124333034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150466392744292,0.039304929727767585,0.0,0.0,0.2503796100631707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041646611826291986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052979055453154206,0.1351172129633545,0.0,0.07236119481131285,0.0,0.09840833510614518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848519927003087,0.0,0.0591306761078885,0.0,0.0893141702101547,0.0,0.06251186864124497,0.04357499039649804,0.20120074208507865,0.0,0.07900337418900966
mentalhealth,Bradythenarwhal,2020/04/07,"I ate magic mushrooms and had an identity crisis. I tripped and had an identity crisis.

Apologies for the long read.

I took mushrooms. I don’t know how many. Supposedly 4 grams, but I just took some of whatever was in the bag and gave the rest to my friends who bought some. I was alone in my room and talking with my Xbox friends when I started to feel a rise. I felt weird. Thinking weird. Even though I was trying to think good and right. I asked my friend “What do I do?” and he told me that I don’t have to do anything and enjoy the trip. Do whatever I want. But that wasn’t an answer I was looking for and jusy kept asking him what the fuck do I do. I started to panic. I didn’t know who I was supposed to be or what i’m supposed to do. I didn’t know where I was going in life. I felt so trapped. I started walking everywhere in my room and could barely breathe and tried to call my one real life friend. He didn’t answer. I tried to call my mom, who was mad at me for finding out I do psychedelics, and she declined my call immediately. I have never been so scared in my fucking life. I had nobody to call except my other friend who I gave some shrooms too. He picked up immediately and I started crying my fucking eyes out. I explained everything to him and how I feel like i’ve been an asshole for so long and I want to be better and care about what people say and not always have negative thoughts. He was blown away because he didn’t know I had problems like this and tried to reassure me that i’m a good person and I do selfless acts for so many people. He was confused about what I want and what i’m looking for and I just wanted things to make sense. We got in a facetime call with my other friend and they tried to take my mind off of it and I started bawling more. He offered to walk to my house and come and walk with me outside to our other friends house and watch a movie. 

We hung up and I called my mom again and apologized for everything and we talked it out and I told her everything and told her I want to be better and i’ll finally get a therapist and I want to focus on school more and actually care about it. She told me she loved me and she will help however she can. I apologized to my sister and a few girls i’ve talked to in the past that I feel like I had hurt.

My friend got to my house about 20 minutes later and I tried so hard to keep my composition, but I just broke down. The stars and moon were out and we took a long walk and told me how he wants to see me and our other friends go far in life. How we’ll always hang out in and out and after college and if he makes it and succeeds and if I don’t then he’ll always have a place for me. But he said he was fully confident that i’ll succeed and be okay. He assured me that I have a family that loves me, friends that care about me and a good situation and that i’m just letting shitty thoughts get to me and I had been for a long time. He told me i’m going to be okay and he’s always going to be in my life and we’ll even be each others best men at our weddings. 

We made it to our friends house and they put on Fantastic Mr. Fox for me and everything was okay. I walked home alone and thought a lot and knew my life was going to take a change now.  When I got home I sat in a lawn chair and looked at the clear sky and the bright moon.

This morning my mom told me she has therapist’s lined up for me after this virus ends and we called all my professors and explained how i’ve been struggling with depression and mental issues and how i’m going to do my work now. They told me it’s not too late and I can do my late work and still make it and pass these classes. 

I will always be grateful to mushrooms and LSD for helping me make a change, but I will NEVER do psychedelics again. I’m done. 

Psychedelics are a push, not an answer.",1.7105234882558733,3.2275634938423683,3.0520282715784965,94.14134754051548,77.85467980295566,6.086556721639181,22.482401656314696,6.768245384624635,0.3587373598914829,2975,87,693,28,69,967,272,812,0.08199999999999999,0.722,0.196,0.9986,1,3,0,0,0,0,54.0,12,0,3,7,34,48,4,4,30,3,68,14,2,12,5,155,157,88,0,11,16,4,6,3,11,6,6,2,5,4,36,83,1,2,21,2,1,23,14,14,0,1,57,15,123,34,86,84,11,86,0,3,7,5,99,35,3,8,31,461,159,9,0.0,0.0,0.043405591035705016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092134727804889,0.0,0.0,0.18505260103909527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036602851486830935,0.0,0.08316468569542299,0.0,0.04178996913755039,0.0,0.0,0.02711429990165822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046678507515855006,0.07867703402139417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3179299101692306,0.0,0.13604949185536652,0.0,0.0941068595873843,0.0383151642545696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03551327392241162,0.0,0.04885865935402716,0.0,0.0,0.03831014166044045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045517987476927466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03939564865398891,0.0,0.0,0.05875660119265149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15990128247356586,0.0,0.04193132878758494,0.0,0.06747053873097553,0.06355234974812972,0.08541462070390035,0.04872513526265198,0.04065347149776274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3780123980794659,0.12336178647954585,0.04647742221481728,0.0,0.1516724026783754,0.1119219222547912,0.10672299586024782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03984490936303019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059627363516269086,0.0,0.08923316168758902,0.0,0.0,0.205293556544612,0.047616241459955605,0.0,0.0,0.046425058206808895,0.0,0.03953543722782418,0.0,0.0,0.09777911426496652,0.0,0.10034966210888896,0.0,0.0,0.04548331834049571,0.1885031839521316,0.0651913338112935,0.0,0.0,0.1574518866771834,0.11205477210331702,0.0,0.0,0.03781489361056846,0.08028899895658152,0.042087593186040266,0.11876168836535927,0.0901904950839434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044824890090324566,0.0,0.04491163113077412,0.1562816134751027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861068910243566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030140470949307118,0.0,0.0,0.05218712797856059,0.0,0.0,0.042460730658416115,0.06167299132896858,0.038837797418355136,0.04647162688110669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04256088939565703,0.0,0.044714198561741005,0.0,0.0,0.04449155244741889,0.05062742662494129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03798526334065948,0.04231020509810271,0.0353718961289024,0.04453175468868995,0.04501564449470051,0.03544441519774761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04999683921912767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15741415059050054,0.0,0.03552139866163995,0.0,0.0,0.046499647304802376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688612046276833,0.10725284949727552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328829187644313,0.02955021377761878,0.0570013552600513,0.04370089829992208,0.10593530106889404,0.0259363632754284,0.0,0.0,0.3400166667179092,0.14825513553162128,0.18119202852136146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836461953204583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476323429614328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IcyJuggernaut2,2020/04/07,"How often does everyone else want to do things they need/want to do? Hi, I recently started to take a good look at my habits and things that I do in order to sort out my life but first I wanted to ask if my attitude about is 'normal'. Basically, I look around at the people in my life (friends, family, etc.) and see them get up everyday wanting to do things they actually want to do. My sister will get up at 9 am and work on sewing something, my mom will get up the same time and go out to work in the garden or help my dad fix something. These aren't things they have to do, they are things they want to do. And I see it on television shows and movies as well, people having the motivation to do things a lot. And I feel like I have never had that. Sure there are things I want to do but I can very rarely seem to push myself to do them, maybe 2 days every two weeks and evwn then I still don't get things done. This is for things I want to do not have to do, I get up for work and whatnot. So my question is, how often do you, other redditors, actually have the motivation to do the things you want to do? Is this something everyone experiences or is it just the people around me? Sorry if this is confusing, I don't really know how to explain it but I figured this would be a good place to ask.",3.903492647058824,3.988707363970587,5.183088235294118,86.40014705882353,70.94852941176471,8.75294117647059,24.823529411764717,8.671277953709913,1.3057514705882354,1001,24,231,16,17,335,125,272,0.023,0.8640000000000001,0.113,0.9645,0,0,3,0,0,0,29.0,0,2,7,6,14,7,0,1,10,0,39,2,0,5,2,51,65,22,0,12,9,3,1,1,1,3,2,0,1,0,21,13,0,0,8,2,0,2,5,1,1,2,2,5,33,6,40,59,3,30,0,0,4,0,19,17,0,11,11,177,54,5,0.0,0.0,0.16178037253355287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14758209012097773,0.15498480163965395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053458186168020914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253894567634657,0.08482682524628493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924524566667174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09244597903209448,0.0,0.0,0.0698396979430648,0.15841283834838002,0.0,0.08108383223578898,0.07814276721289436,0.0,0.04191245348230915,0.05921773308637586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050750199301974,0.0,0.0,0.06404179855884568,0.0,0.21653704341127392,0.0,0.04710917269502257,0.1390509827958723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055560452309706174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04555502285055506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709749288001052,0.04049661966847646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13921603448216968,0.0,0.0,0.07047142349244903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327569379941636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708157038782184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061463026956162986,0.0639310661248984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812161101367114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723996714660285,0.0,0.08660401724378451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285749596559048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0531024433951286,0.0,0.08184539612088793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13210765152831638,0.07546134527076404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19144187274330368,0.0,0.0927902931447437,0.05867105899706668,0.0,0.06619729130823039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07812429592784485,0.0,0.06232412246667497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5506945625342116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0483347238540397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08097299044381835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683942020061111,0.44002420402455467,0.0,0.06649059383797024,0.0,0.07452944977156581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810380861239029,0.0,0.0,0.058883772087433235,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SoManyThrowAwayAccs,2020/04/07,"I (19F) have always felt like there's something wrong with me, like I have a mental illness but I don't know what I must've read about at least 10 mental disorders/illnesses such as ADHD, OCD, schizophrenia, BPD, autism, etc. trying to find something that would explain how I feel. But I can't find anything. 

I have trouble focusing, to the point where I basically hardly ever studied for a test while I was in school. I remember studying only one or two times. I also get very easily distracted and can't resist temptation. I have very hard time trying to stop myself from eating even though I am not hungry. This is why I thought I had ADHD.

I get extremely caught up in my fantasies. I invent extraordinary stories in my head with people I will never meet in my life (celebrities) and then get really sad once I realise there isn't a chance this is ever gonna happen. Sadness then turns into anger where I feel like punching or breaking something. But then I realise I'm being overly dramatic and pathetic and just kinda stop...

I used to daydream about some celeb crush having hidden cameras in my house and everywhere I went (much like the truman show), and I'd act differently around the house trying to be cool, because someone was watching me. Even though I was aware no was watching.

I don't think I have my own mannerisms. I just copy off of other people. People who I think are cool and funny.

I feel so pathetic now that I have written this down.",5.043387096774199,6.4195626845878175,5.668421146953403,79.26929838709681,69.10752688172043,8.017275985663083,28.645340501792113,8.395991825355821,2.1397697491039422,1155,41,205,17,20,374,169,279,0.16399999999999998,0.754,0.08199999999999999,-0.9748,1,0,3,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,0,20,12,1,1,6,2,25,4,1,2,3,41,45,22,0,1,8,0,6,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,8,11,1,2,12,3,0,3,8,6,0,2,10,10,38,6,25,30,5,31,0,2,2,0,3,15,0,4,16,145,46,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544447092601969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465567564436115,0.08808345077474546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711321670302945,0.0942372557408504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453087087856785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333261324635013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060047888598734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832053223947152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806114632364124,0.13983819086527904,0.1915116664870608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16057698848015325,0.07562593337280551,0.10164156699189113,0.0,0.19350703720933812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16592140729749946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361106441589644,0.0,0.1896583508037906,0.0,0.1086422228654286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2442949299379132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581775245916215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477158220282873,0.20687010469684144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133626318994745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781879494890998,0.0,0.08164524873253441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273674181510535,0.0717330281845121,0.0805107979819072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201686114658624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007129269879272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588798665592072,0.0,0.06781620364081632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991799573907776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713530325101177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969427492943,0.244487074365586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770062959715416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13566078082527916,0.20801252738944825,0.08404049105150033,0.1234548644557805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21561462842753845,0.11514456322675436,0.10340919284041092,0.0,0.0,0.09142848085393178,0.0,0.1746900833389166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813266838264444,0.09552158863574532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519943760981658,0.1157405697917004,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Techstoreowo,2020/04/07,"How the coronavirus has been affecting me mentally Okay so, I don’t have the coronavirus, but It’s been affecting me negatively a lot.

Since more stuff has been happening with the coronavirus, my mental health has gotten progressively worse. I’m trans and prone to stress (I’m not diagnosed with any stress disorders, but I’m easily stressed). Being around people (aka my family) who don’t use my proper pronouns, and not having the structure of my traditional school has been messing with me a lot (it’s been mainly stress and depression) I don’t have my usual support system and I feel like I have no one to go to 
I’ve been experiencing suicidal thoughts and thoughts of self harm a lot lately as well 

Is there any way to keep my mental health and spirits up during this whole deal?",5.3784213759213735,7.068965601351351,5.922137592137593,76.56782555282558,68.66216216216216,9.976412776412776,28.995085995086,10.230975488527342,3.094059459459458,631,23,114,17,11,204,87,148,0.17800000000000002,0.736,0.086,-0.9587,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,5,11,0,4,7,1,19,3,0,4,0,25,31,11,1,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,5,10,0,1,3,0,0,1,7,7,1,1,9,2,13,4,12,21,6,7,1,1,0,0,3,2,0,3,3,79,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16403547835884658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736690422374492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12434179977227358,0.10387970056874923,0.12241482503536763,0.0,0.0,0.13822749229503367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369871501681154,0.0,0.060983150125173725,0.0861625509087225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685444423325374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665346850786457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.256401838907311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720214551756216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605134828841947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05892309401183499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3076104385195686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3646342163295835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172726493591127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361456777185235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12206197806487025,0.0,0.0,0.12582069822472708,0.0,0.0,0.0997683826375463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5526253266972536,0.0,0.13806757977825412,0.1319258392864059,0.13686480172440402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19149894132011575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416679549923837,0.13283293719370018,0.0,0.0,0.095733207231692,0.0,0.0,0.10844129242122297,0.0,0.0,0.13465479303219932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291010062996754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thetresident,2020/04/07,"Internal struggles... Sorry guys, very long post but wanted to get opinions of what people think.  
Whether or not anyone is a therapist or has knowledge on mental health issues I would still like to know what people think.

For the past few months I have been writing a list of all the things that I struggle with mentally.   
I did this for myself and for my therapist as I found it very hard to explain a lot of these feelings in person. I suppose I just want to know if anyone else feels or does the same things as I have listed below  
Thank you!

​

*  Always living in the past and allowing the past and it’s experiences to ruin what I have in the present (relationships mainly) 

​

* Get extremely angry and irritable at the smallest of things yet can normally stop this when in public or around people I am trying to impress or I respect

​

* Am extremely paranoid and constantly over think things in my head. For example, If i have a conversation with someone in authority or someone I look up to, once they are gone I will run through that conversation numerous times in my head to make sure I didn’t say anything offensive or anything that could be misconstrued as bad. Linked to this is always caring and obsessing about how other people may see me. I will always think people are thinking the worst about me and look down to me, these people don’t even have to overtly do anything for me to feel like this

​

* Have really bad OCD where I will make constant mental lists in my head throughout the day up to 30 times a day about things that need doing when I get home. Doing the washing up, putting on laundry, mow lawn, etc. and cannot relax or do anything until that is ALL done. It’s good as I get things done but other things get pushed aside such as gfs, going to the gym etc. I cannot relax until all these jobs are done and once they are, all I want to do is relax and not go to the gym or anything 

​

* Have rapid-cycling, bipolar-like symptoms where one hour I can be very happy then something comes into my head and it will put me in a bad mood for the rest of the day. As the thought has gone on in my head, this confuses the hell out of anyone I am around who instantly think it’s them who have annoyed me. Will also have days where I have no emotion at all, i can have intrusive thoughts about family members dying etc and not care or feel anything, yet other days have too much emotion and something like a horrible news story will set me off crying

​

* Always feel like I’m a burden on people which makes it very hard for me to ask or seek out help for my issues as this will make me feel even more of a burden. Will find myself always putting people before me and helping people out as much as I can which I think is a subconscious way of trying to alleviate the burden I feel on people

​

* Will always hold a grudge and find it very hard to forgive even if it was minor. Will wish death and violence on people even over the smallest of things. If I'm in a bad mood, I could happily watch someone die if they wrong me or upset me as to me that seems like a fitting amount of justice.

​

* Hold my self so low that i will look up to everyone regardless of whether they are more successful than me or not and will resent them for it whether it’s true or not

​

* Had a few times where I’ve been extremely happy in the company of friends or my girlfriend then in 1 second I have suddenly felt empty, irritable and angry without a single thought of sadness even entering my mind. Not only does this scare the hell out of me it also scares the person I am with and has resulted in a recent break up from gf and many previous ones

​

* Will always think the worst is going to happen and catastrophize every event. I will see it as being a realist not being pessimistic and would rather not get my hopes up and expect the worst than hope something will work out and be disappointed. It’s almost like I find comfort in being sad because then I can’t be disappointed, when it does go wrong I will say to myself “Yep, see, told you it wasn’t going to go my way - it never does”

​

* When hearing a loud noise like a door slam or a bang, I get very irritable and angry and shout because it has made me jump, the same feeling goes for anything that has caused me pain, if i trap a finger in a door for example, I will instantly lose my cool and kick or punch the door

​

* Have extreme anxiety and will sometimes have panic attacks in new places or in a situation where I don’t know where the exits or toilets are or if I cannot leave without drawing attention to myself (eg. meetings). I panic about needing the toilet and not being able to go which makes me panic and tightens my tummy which makes the symptoms worse. This has put me off so many events from new job interviews to dates with girls etc. Not sure if it is related but have always found it impossible to get aroused and ready to have sex with a new girl for the first few times. After 3 or 4 times I am fine but by this point it is normally too late as she has already been offended thinking it's her. It is definitely psychosomatic as I have never had issues getting an erection at other times in life

​

* I find that drinking is the only way my inhibitions cease and I can finally relax and stop the worrying and constant carnival that goes on in my head 99% of the time, this has also ended relationships but not through violence as I have never been violent towards a woman. This said, I have started drinking less alcohol since being on Sertraline

​

* I regularly experience hallucinations when waking up from sleep. I will normally dream of something unpleasant (e.g. spiders in my bed, water leak in my house resulting in a torrent of water running alongside my bed) and then wake up and still see the spiders running about. My eyes are open and I am actually looking at the duvet cover and can see them, this isn’t a dream. This will normally result in me jumping out of the bed to turn the light on, as soon as the light is on the objects disappear. (hypnopompic hallucinations I think)",8.553270425226946,6.913361486622076,8.337780697563307,73.32422240802676,62.06020066889632,11.084663162924032,36.65814620162446,9.784248007369934,3.4165413760152887,4902,183,912,76,56,1581,424,1196,0.198,0.703,0.098,-0.9994,3,0,7,0,0,0,146.0,0,2,7,4,41,70,8,10,66,2,117,24,12,13,11,199,201,108,3,27,52,0,13,7,3,23,7,6,8,7,69,54,5,4,37,10,0,22,26,38,0,4,24,33,107,30,162,143,27,159,2,7,11,2,41,74,2,37,64,677,176,5,0.02492413521026341,0.0,0.024322360615489067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026636320626235426,0.024957921129206948,0.0,0.027504402982409592,0.059795465768416864,0.16591101700625407,0.3780740612197739,0.4239977330822206,0.0,0.0,0.019066895215493453,0.0,0.0,0.052282604562074564,0.025537721920945358,0.14357307722866774,0.04437552912131616,0.023300701910659152,0.028354801966660237,0.0,0.0,0.08324244727498685,0.03038704297343474,0.0,0.02120860331463434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05082363390679755,0.02560395252996359,0.0,0.02146993554988697,0.0,0.08080240710313248,0.0,0.03979978774010995,0.0,0.027377992181248152,0.0803700264417978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05173463466957006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724511473313898,0.07651813138504104,0.0,0.048832327577365504,0.0,0.0,0.020820916772998792,0.056072594829321726,0.02207538592102623,0.0,0.1111879966281674,0.08231078120630712,0.0,0.02099965888378397,0.02381607929375596,0.0,0.0487611736044348,0.02349625648500777,0.0,0.10081913319023522,0.03561161434857975,0.023931078428197926,0.027303171840739226,0.0911208321735994,0.021200456677349683,0.0,0.054656055583012265,0.01925632503645892,0.0,0.11719648747456465,0.0,0.09915472291839812,0.020905182096783364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02467881242511643,0.022040330453215348,0.053064410787472836,0.06698138864796749,0.0,0.15347612003347502,0.02649319022340332,0.02809131181293826,0.0,0.033412244906435414,0.0,0.02500093980566312,0.049510580111418685,0.02454525259739947,0.028759105654194244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804296499768205,0.04946671667806567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0410929586673407,0.0,0.028115510136092224,0.02639106042664436,0.0,0.0,0.017604653793256615,0.08523671447925459,0.0,0.022008468021987637,0.02205707534428791,0.08371998509105745,0.027883731953405447,0.0,0.02118960846025629,0.0,0.023583819376328998,0.09982232275159536,0.05053832221099568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753529982183431,0.0,0.025166271490093317,0.0,0.01989420693471203,0.0,0.0366442143745932,0.03696186089167961,0.05766908879505622,0.07221565529456818,0.0,0.0,0.09768144244433287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053086781126308775,0.033778478120327374,0.037911855903904584,0.02652103714591253,0.08772930739294191,0.0,0.0,0.07137872184864086,0.1900718282485442,0.04352558699378167,0.02604041646296117,0.0,0.023561363966151917,0.0,0.02387043186410821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022255991460964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.015967039234651825,0.0,0.024609576650059018,0.053518387237217496,0.0,0.0,0.023708560154493543,0.03964134540147552,0.04990681479203227,0.0,0.09930654411958016,0.02268999661037121,0.02600130877621464,0.0,0.0,0.02061750220483645,0.02801577225666496,0.024942135122634025,0.0,0.063354416645341,0.07675126787173955,0.024650607031437625,0.02790052879888539,0.017641431185644346,0.0,0.03980889314946865,0.04167538612935511,0.0,0.05211223546340487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046981404941298086,0.051811439528780534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022946795038437547,0.0,0.05787768401333865,0.13246790353303867,0.15970379450266292,0.0,0.05936093791208976,0.1017342457298336,0.0,0.0,0.02381607929375596,0.0,0.03384370348913012,0.02711030196317111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339013089041308,0.04410270212726865,0.059350855220720186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028661525448222543,0.04805195384570965,0.0,0.018145067278089438,0.025311669152336454,0.025399823107700226,0.03541078108999378,0.05450125839225736,0.4239977330822206,0.0
mentalhealth,Dovath1103,2020/04/07,"How do I reach out for help without people freaking out? My head hasnt been like this for almost a year. 

Back story: 
Beginning of february I moved to korea (military). Before coming here I had to stop taking my antidepressants for a few months to avoid complications with coming here. All was going well till about a month ago. The depression has slowly been getting worse and more unbearable. Today it has finally hit me full swing. I havent been suicidal since about june last year but now it's a constant thought in my head. 

I was supposed to get put back on meds today but it was cancelled due to covid. When it got cancelled I tried reaching out to one of my friends to see if I could talk to her about it. She sent me a long message back saying that I'm too much right now and that she will talk to me again sometime in the future but not soon. It definitely felt like a punch in the gut. But at the same time I get it. Dealing with people going through this stuff is exhausting. I don't blame her but it's been a constant thought in my head today that I ruined that friendship and that I'm not worth the shit on my shoes.

**********

I don't know what I'm looking for here or if I just needed to outlet in a more anonymous fashion rather than to my friends back home. 

Tl;dr: my heads in a real bad spot right now and I dont know what I should be doing.",0.8580138339920964,3.2649266920289897,2.2080500658761544,94.12851778656128,86.42753623188406,4.9396574440052685,19.957839262187086,6.42735559955562,0.12075507246376738,1061,32,226,11,33,340,149,276,0.11900000000000001,0.773,0.10800000000000001,-0.2596,0,1,0,0,1,0,32.0,0,0,0,0,21,12,1,1,14,0,22,8,7,1,1,39,45,15,1,6,13,0,1,2,2,2,1,1,1,0,18,11,0,2,5,0,1,7,8,7,1,1,13,4,29,5,38,27,7,52,0,2,2,0,13,15,1,4,32,161,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073901797652824,0.0,0.10250220407060964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148446835822947,0.0854692010779344,0.0,0.0,0.08710375250225556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17635408844544898,0.0,0.2212370381171765,0.0,0.08172888166013144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055322173113616,0.08816548541792081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996919549531515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982849601927103,0.11213415080951107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15817148778687729,0.0,0.16044202577725122,0.0,0.11635100982889952,0.0,0.08186939826249412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42021770681390935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861205963682471,0.0,0.10267888181272324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251254497196247,0.08343987016350934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10001921756486183,0.0,0.0,0.0905884278757176,0.08595951313578666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137027115100242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341105082333324,0.10879614255176287,0.07524891036369485,0.07590119762648709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936411970291449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14193184838333542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290353547139214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651201092940044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17483564591540027,0.0,0.08140352024793583,0.0,0.0,0.0815704128416376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507460556920244,0.08467609972343647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012400648002654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0855804237788364,0.0,0.0,0.11718165459642553,0.11196899486781636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696457155639891,0.16455171970205976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16253028287593213,0.05968894812297045,0.0,0.29108573122233505,0.0,0.0,0.06949806002648926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203703065486164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867470839389086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043170958856862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318374052752286
mentalhealth,mindthegap14,2020/04/07,"How do you support a spouse who is depressed without burning out? I feel I have compassion fatigue. About once a week for years my partner has an emotional breakdown for one reason or another. I’m not a therapist. I can’t solve these deep-rooted emotion problems. I love this person very much but I feel I’m starting to check out bc I just don’t have much empathy left. Recently I got a therapist for my partner and it seems to be going well, but the breakdowns are still happening. 

What else can I do? Is it inhumane to just let them cry alone sometimes? I have responsibilities and can’t just be there all the time, soothing, comforting, being the strong person.",3.073434282253181,5.662239614173231,4.201102362204725,82.34285281647489,78.05511811023622,7.372259236826168,29.45427013930951,8.384062270229773,2.5157382192610545,529,25,96,11,13,172,86,127,0.10400000000000001,0.727,0.16899999999999998,0.8571,0,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,1,8,8,0,0,8,0,17,2,0,2,1,19,28,6,0,1,8,1,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,4,6,4,0,0,4,0,1,1,5,3,1,1,1,2,13,5,10,23,3,10,0,2,0,1,9,3,0,2,6,71,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16609516159474527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816213714581635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761591337827588,0.0,0.0,0.1381266178651648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13396872345542346,0.3607897784721551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621759829386322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911420801273996,0.0,0.12826269866321116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14181483781646578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742426910296612,0.16398939443611193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474036634931164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357810981770748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17078902858571715,0.10867099761706236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800581449308141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534526224847135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16488727473911474,0.1583462248339777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599500657153386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15861022799369012,0.0,0.1135108526504655,0.0,0.12807184850582226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819862019573968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724043243801213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09351315301077394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232220994084995,0.0,0.0,0.12863930068419474,0.0,0.14419206906702398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15459114952606087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327315055583468
mentalhealth,laciro349,2020/04/07,"I tried going to sleep and kind of freaked out It was late and I was trying to go to bed, it was pitch black in my room and I had music on, and then I just kept thinking about something bad that could happen and I couldn’t stop,it felt like there was something else with me in the room but there wasn’t, I was just creating a scenario where there was, I tried focusing on the music but somehow the quietness of the room drowned it out and I had to turn the light on, and then I started crying, I called a friend because I was still stressed out and I had to hear someones voice, what was that,and does anyone know why it happened? It doesn’t happen often but it happens, and that was the first time I cried over it.I also don’t have any kind of ptsd, idk if that means anything here though.",1.3958863636363608,3.3884765393939418,2.0912689393939417,98.43690340909092,80.57575757575758,4.609848484848485,20.615530303030305,5.148860815047168,-0.3742651515151514,619,17,141,2,16,191,87,165,0.132,0.8140000000000001,0.054000000000000006,-0.9144,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,13,7,0,1,8,0,18,1,1,0,0,28,32,17,1,3,6,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,4,0,10,13,0,1,4,0,0,2,4,3,0,1,15,6,15,4,19,15,0,22,0,0,1,0,3,13,0,3,8,98,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11044395421235394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09391735660919494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656748233586424,0.0,0.1136501249751836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11531340525428535,0.084188620483482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102247914866056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026703810254024,0.0,0.3034076590291282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085818715113772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11537050589967465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13260418141464642,0.0,0.0,0.11747356943196165,0.0,0.0,0.10670096737074958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15697854875127706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4885095315074786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556563954689596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876339494766423,0.07589988282862555,0.0,0.15579048047658126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747200408341635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504387873501737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16143945298393522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13820653426020485,0.0,0.11701743938625216,0.21264271644097965,0.0,0.0,0.09775270046329212,0.0,0.11029226503408196,0.11546346478708587,0.15820086726957672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884932578461874,0.13568922506217398,0.0,0.08053118289745048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.281296345086237,0.15022053479605327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461990151608075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,painbrainnotsane,2020/04/07,"Any tips for getting over mistakes you made as a child? I’m almost 30, yet my intrusive thoughts are obsessing over things I did as a child under 11. I’m still not sure the exact details of all of it, but what I do remember it’s really upsetting me and making me hate myself. 

I have OCD which makes me obsess over these things, and my illness is even trying to add false memories to it to make it even worse than it is.

I just feel hopeless. I’ve talked it out with others but it’s not helping. My brain is still tormenting me, and not letting me forgive myself.",3.0616714975845447,4.4827492347826094,4.374202898550728,86.46033816425123,74.04347826086956,7.545893719806764,25.82125603864734,8.167268648758528,1.5434444444444448,442,15,91,7,9,146,76,115,0.264,0.736,0.0,-0.9853,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,1,0,0,6,8,1,3,3,0,8,2,1,4,3,25,18,7,0,1,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,13,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,1,15,2,15,14,1,8,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,1,3,69,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21332340963890464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487085399637956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378171024000489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814147285115529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771671014603866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11130180174662167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2103275929050004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14279262223466702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178423432054465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20157851832375065,0.42660681026285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13647543935011724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24132670771659145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3402594621816295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007826180678024,0.0,0.0,0.1712291663728901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28306148479966803,0.0,0.0,0.16912570040340644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446365301367297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21710048851860533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Robotorian,2020/04/07,"My mom has been acting weird lately... Ever since we moved up to my grandparents house to take care of them. shes been mentally declining and started saying crazy stuff about my dads side of the family like for example ""your dad is gonna kill me..."" and ""your uncle is gonna put me in jail"" my dad would never do something like that or my uncles and aunts... but it mostly started when my step-sister came to live with us temporarily and she reminded my mom about her ex-husbands suicide (she watched her husband shoot himself) and she moved past that but then my step sis reminded her of it and now it replays in her head 24/7 and she doesn't even act normal anymore she has suspicion that my dad is gonna kill her and my uncles and aunts is gonna throw her in jail. she literally got the police out here yesterday to try to arrest my dad. I don't know whats wrong with her but I just want my mom back.",3.2902872670807426,4.604589690217392,4.285714285714288,87.745,73.29347826086956,7.648447204968945,24.01242236024845,8.192908349453996,1.2055291925465847,709,20,151,11,14,230,105,184,0.14300000000000002,0.804,0.053,-0.9679,1,0,1,1,0,2,22.0,2,2,1,0,9,7,2,0,2,0,13,1,1,0,2,26,25,15,3,3,5,12,0,2,0,5,0,1,0,0,8,14,0,0,1,0,0,8,3,4,0,0,4,2,36,3,18,16,1,25,0,0,1,0,33,6,0,2,13,99,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082734068375205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919039573328616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624118974690384,0.14478000304907152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937906579122178,0.1284484952683017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386638553943342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113571579396114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457345163941814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16385067671227346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3142072624298117,0.0,0.07804031607372901,0.0,0.1601838880979821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13874952973739915,0.0,0.12538993465804069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310412267141806,0.0,0.0,0.4989313557927855,0.0,0.30185026405572235,0.0,0.0,0.10952031840012018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13913132973591558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13555650881945133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275073833398427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292530004091868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746511623133753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093196997372156,0.0,0.0,0.20101879889434396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16255775504902936,0.1553266038399472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676746299245568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964097038659957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17081033199074308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08375616955643993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087379827229567,0.15525635909229807,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jharnachos,2020/04/07,"My Mother[52] thinks my[20F] life is hers...Need Help and Advice. My [20F] Mother [52] thinks my life is hers. I'm a single child and my father passed away when I was 17. I've been a bright student all my life and I'm in one of the top colleges in my country. My career choice is a very competitive field that can take me years to get in. 
My mom thinks I can change her life. We are not so financially well, we live on rent and she's the only source of income. According to her, I cannot pursue masters/ or any other higher degree even if I get a scholarship because I'm not in a condition to do so. I should earn as soon as possible to support her, buy her a house, a car, and free her of all the burdens in life. 
I've been hearing this narrative since I was 13. I'm tired of it. I've thought of ending my life if I'm not able to secure a job as soon as I get over with college( that's in 1 year). She thinks my life is hers to control. I'm not a reckless child. I don't have a boyfriend, I don't party, I have no friends. I just focus on my studies because that's what I have been told to do since my childhood. 
I've had anxious and depressive thoughts since 3 years but my mother does not believe in therapy. 
I don't know what to do with my relationship with her. She constantly reminds me everyday that through me she gets to redeem her life.
I'm exhausted. 

TL;DR - I'm 20, living with my mom who thinks that I'm her token to a good life and she reminds me everyday about that. I'm tired of it.",1.1315538793103457,2.7955595562500046,3.1315732758620705,92.26437500000004,80.0,6.288793103448278,22.90948275862069,7.237678284180719,0.6887780172413801,1158,38,267,15,29,391,147,320,0.064,0.868,0.067,-0.0226,3,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,2,0,0,4,9,10,0,0,14,0,24,12,0,1,2,35,50,18,0,3,10,5,0,0,1,1,12,1,1,2,13,13,0,2,8,0,4,2,10,3,1,1,9,2,49,8,37,40,3,25,0,1,1,0,30,12,0,3,11,166,62,7,0.09551488311772137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333603833492224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495339586495508,0.0,0.0,0.10790463069244903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0897393768467839,0.0,0.0,0.11644997242293972,0.0,0.0,0.10761256505918708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010420815170131,0.0,0.0,0.1032176563663767,0.1071280632118868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226682886996414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358571787975676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459783612300216,0.0,0.0,0.06308667947693798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07379456176183963,0.0,0.1996103367903591,0.0,0.0,0.08011335228620922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765221508393134,0.0,0.06402161278648291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021135104416452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947837833060958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05249248183150799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6071848799105338,0.0,0.0,0.16868278341345433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237317534215619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472335674517228,0.0726433726765012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767867934032713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10254723902129233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23703269501564025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838915745941573,0.0,0.0,0.07181530513065593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922959304971908,0.0,0.0,0.3060104018994612,0.0,0.1516562961589884,0.0,0.21956061467379948,0.0,0.09126856401937496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880978169990162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587935079915203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845253594480768
mentalhealth,Excellentbeans,2020/04/07,"Can't find any real options. Living in the US northeast. Short version of this story- Was part of a weekly dbt group, no counselor because my work schedule did not fit with anyone's schedule, then there was no one available. Other places locally I have had bad experiences with or now work for (they do behavioral health and in home care services). All physical locations are closed and I can only get answering machines. My job has me regularly visit 4 immunocompromised elderly clients. I also have to visit every single client in our roster every 3 months (up to an hour drive to get to some, one way). I didn't know what this job entailed when I took it, not fully trained. My boyfriend who I live is ""high risk"". We have lost around 40% of our work staff due to lack of childcare so boss is pressuring me hard to take on more. Can do job at work, cannot properly do what I need to at home 75% of the time. Looked into apps to help- cannot afford even the reduced cost and I don't trust dr to ask for a temporary anxiety RX. I am lost on what to do or where to go.",2.9728638497652615,4.776587530516436,4.148943661971831,86.39318075117373,75.10328638497653,7.174647887323943,25.448356807511736,7.984000788550335,1.440528638497653,836,29,170,13,18,273,142,213,0.12,0.853,0.027999999999999997,-0.9379,4,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,4,0,1,6,8,7,0,2,6,0,23,3,0,1,1,23,35,9,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,2,0,8,9,0,0,3,0,1,5,9,5,0,2,8,2,19,2,30,27,7,33,0,2,1,0,11,17,0,4,10,111,27,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395055180904936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839561308355481,0.0,0.09943969430451732,0.0,0.0,0.0908899282646371,0.0,0.0,0.11571598313602745,0.12152029205016344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085337100853518,0.07923886479538668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253040314161746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08585518332811966,0.0,0.21903929678134296,0.0,0.0,0.12715222227723896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880575722618313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582567826849104,0.0,0.07387460400731342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116442814206997,0.0,0.0,0.1381700957178346,0.0,0.0,0.08712754179358445,0.13733839550654564,0.26077510612012234,0.0,0.12801100479795105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38697610144083294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07143745222221752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295617936200586,0.0,0.10915633655274752,0.0,0.28379231733866084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10375437813341834,0.0,0.0,0.09638370868603928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17616510188967602,0.09886096606168443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14076324691538888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358087419778251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479536564772872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09773404209697327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07579646128868021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444203327176622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15635834840957946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031776251133666,0.10426772556144144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3785283178777709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,p0tat0sa1ad_,2020/04/07,Is it weird Is it weird I like the taste of paint? I like the bitter metallic taste as well as the smooth texture that coats my mouth that has a somewhat grains but silky texture?,1.6483333333333334,4.104466055555555,1.3588888888888917,101.35000000000002,82.8888888888889,3.6,20.11111111111111,3.1291,-0.7449222222222223,142,4,31,0,4,41,25,36,0.124,0.73,0.146,0.2047,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,6,1,0,4,0,3,3,1,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,3,3,3,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,20,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7358600718518155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6771336313123436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MorphinBlue,2020/04/07,"I’ve sent my husband my emails from therapy I have no idea why, but I absolutely cannot open up about my mental health issues. My therapist is the only person I can talk to openly about it all.

Last night I was silent and the guilt I felt for subjecting my husband to more of my fallout from bad mental health, with no explanation was agonising. He doesn’t deserve to live his life like this, with someone who is awfully depressed all the time. He’s the happiest, care free soul I know and I feel like I’ve poisoned him and his happy nature.

I decided I couldn’t bare to carry on putting him through that, and with his permission I have sent him all of my therapy emails. 

He’s reading them now and I feel so sick. I’m a mess. He’s going to see just how much I hate being alive and now all my cards on the table for us to discuss. I’m terrified and I don’t know why.",1.947299723756906,3.7062791546961367,3.7511567679558016,88.3174533839779,77.89502762430939,7.1769337016574575,24.01968232044199,8.07648339933343,1.273632320441989,681,23,148,12,16,229,104,181,0.209,0.652,0.139,-0.9413,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,1,0,7,11,2,1,6,1,12,5,0,1,4,27,25,10,0,1,2,2,3,2,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,12,0,0,7,1,1,4,6,6,0,0,5,4,29,6,21,18,6,14,1,1,1,0,22,5,0,0,7,93,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13070028170916392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1595979812356593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13482346431014428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15829771397887515,0.11182871671472523,0.15029825741845645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08896251263608038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666345396055535,0.0,0.15454601750462693,0.0,0.3327790125280243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17670909018000772,0.0,0.16338198991066086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17205520980875266,0.12759701036871207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056538030747387,0.15295029960719425,0.0,0.1382233735132033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3155011549090436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150713199468722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14689760050422088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905200793505485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366804236990132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15736102485287135,0.0,0.0,0.15657747461925015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473821918393085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1326316941117286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258169951838888,0.0,0.0,0.3580230900458873,0.1817493322902436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09127688379211946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18829246847491468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824971858007761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PTV_Sirenz,2020/04/07,"Is it normal to feel sudden explicit moments of pure rage and violence?   For a while now I've been feeling sudden, explicit moments of pure rage and/or violence. I have issues with anger that I can sometimes control. But there's moments, whether I'm in school, or just playing around that for a moment I have a strong feeling of emptiness and rage. Many times I find myself stopping Myself from harming others. Physically. I don't believe this is normal but according to others I'm an ""edgy teenager"". I don't know how this affects me or what's going on but I can't seem to stop myself. I'll suddenly become very.. rough. I fear that I'll hurt someone I love one day. There's also another thing, I crave friends.. no, I long for friendship(s) that will last year's on end. Making memories. I find myself thinking about things that will most likely never happen in my life. Like going to a friend's house and 2 am just to wake them up and take a long drive with me to look at the stars, or to just simply drive around. I read these stories of such great friendships forming yet.. why can't I find something like that? Everyone usually leaves in the end. But I suppose that's predictorial seeing as ""friend"" has ""ends"" at the end. See, I've never truly had a friend. Just some kids to hang with during school hours. Been like that all my life actually. I don't know if that has to do with my depression or anger or excruciating emptiness and loneliness. I do not know how to stop these things..",3.040232439335888,5.288327779310347,3.898199233716476,86.2448722860792,76.3793103448276,6.503192848020435,24.8786717752235,7.526774132740827,1.2737828863346108,1176,41,226,16,27,376,154,290,0.215,0.6940000000000001,0.092,-0.9903,0,0,1,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,1,2,15,21,5,1,10,0,20,4,1,5,7,57,39,21,0,3,16,0,4,4,4,2,2,0,0,1,20,11,0,4,11,2,0,5,9,9,0,1,3,7,27,12,34,34,4,42,0,2,3,1,7,10,0,9,31,149,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.09697067655945787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794660636552786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419799194946486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769205361932517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974623437031077,0.0,0.11195583562302293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145177915763184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408535719349165,0.0,0.08558713905878378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3520489054355715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949521865340032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181875064645114,0.1507332035449505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27246683260591104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3070917163599832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294839483560325,0.0,0.0,0.10955565249613702,0.0,0.0,0.08787246392035042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09785932329187108,0.11465950927296825,0.10637752048560273,0.0,0.0,0.1037163461251634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638332753468116,0.08099972156768227,0.0,0.1052183636757488,0.0,0.0,0.1403757814395676,0.1941884319401608,0.0,0.0,0.17587844805626632,0.08344567910338424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968520371830549,0.0,0.06633017196251922,0.10074546986732902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532803674070682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19472278433160292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673356079259646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993967790568236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20113526383365568,0.15836987079165066,0.0904626141032676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419578376527803,0.07649979467432043,0.0982793602656142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24923302795699565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471378915652514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980508147073844,0.0636722119487597,0.0,0.0,0.05794338089397975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944189292940697,0.08199056458349192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966586806146515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399095000131813
mentalhealth,mkay20,2020/04/07,"Am I getting closer to suicide? I’m not really sure what going on in my head, but up until now I’ve always gone on walks in the afternoon to help clear my head, where I walk to is an open grass area with powerlines running along, really nice relaxing environment. But recently I’ve started having these pictures in my head of being on top of those powerlines, like climbing up them, then jumping, I don’t really want to kill myself, but this idea of killing off keeps coming into my head, furthermore, when I have this image of jumping off, I see myself giving a final message to those few friends I love.

This thing is a bit all over the place, this is the first time I’ve opened up about anything really on reddit, and to the public 

So my question is, am I suicidal? Because I don’t want to kill myself, but this idea of doing it keeps popping into my head, and it’s always that one specific way...",8.429157303370786,6.256703123595508,8.798735955056184,71.60967696629216,62.70786516853932,11.821348314606745,35.73314606741573,10.411451182825502,3.5638516853932583,708,24,133,13,8,237,105,178,0.14400000000000002,0.6759999999999999,0.18,0.5948,2,0,0,0,0,3,22.0,0,0,1,3,5,9,3,0,7,0,12,6,5,0,3,24,25,10,5,2,5,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,13,9,0,2,3,1,0,9,3,3,0,2,1,1,18,6,31,23,3,42,0,0,1,1,8,22,0,1,11,97,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18982499682237805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386704277814707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953390365458706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245311179850768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825822350013866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249543183190492,0.0,0.09702494009205348,0.0,0.0,0.08812752534013346,0.0,0.05959505888258295,0.10942301839102847,0.06482664297159857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5853258878034021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764563969004365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575344773769217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027751624133492,0.3785931762491148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05572714939828095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10294950520977228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729443912231827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917525578542312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778062941517138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922957837686031,0.0,0.11262694650883676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089626360969172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08073688364241427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24954056057988025,0.0,0.1075063634063142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578074024547225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651311638821679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455880053023006,0.09054070956806072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throoaway567567,2020/04/07,Does anyone have sometimes the sensation that you feel like you are a character in a game? A feel like you are physically somewhere but have the sensation that your mind isnt actually there. Its a hard sensation to describe,6.311138211382115,8.135075073170732,6.7204878048780525,71.22186991869921,66.5609756097561,11.320325203252034,35.61788617886179,11.20814326018867,4.616408130081301,182,9,31,6,3,59,28,41,0.042,0.866,0.092,0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,4,0,0,1,2,0,0,6,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,7,1,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,2,2,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,22,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.3248160622643274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23273823358468645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29128149881729554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.336600488347546,0.4755798389164252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981704949008139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32522987380320284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360861775103136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3291996708279177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoselessPrankster,2020/04/07,"Uni acceptances have got me stressed, looking for advice Hey guys, 

I'm a grade 12 student from Canada waiting on uni acceptances. I'm currently waiting on an acceptance to my dream school, and I'm getting really sad every day that I don't get an offer. 

I've already gotten into another school that's basically the exact same, with a few minor drawbacks, but I'd much rather go to the first school. 

Honestly just really sad bc of the whole corona thing and stressed over this uni acceptance. Looking for advice on what to do. Should I just give up at this point? There's still a good chance I'll get in but I feel like stressing and getting sad over it isn't worth it at this point. I feel like I should just stop worrying about it, and just let it be, if it happens it happens, but at this point it's so hard to just let go. 

Any advice would be much appreciated :)",4.4005298651252405,5.39440249710983,5.2429046242774575,83.15121628131024,70.27167630057804,8.541233140655107,28.289499036608863,8.841846274778883,2.0685302504816963,684,24,138,12,12,223,98,173,0.149,0.6679999999999999,0.183,0.7831,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,10,14,0,3,8,0,11,0,0,0,1,30,31,9,0,5,10,0,3,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,15,6,0,3,6,1,1,2,2,6,0,1,2,5,7,8,21,22,5,21,0,3,2,0,4,14,0,1,7,85,22,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3396122913907045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278397623242149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877975823282615,0.12147541157561477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07471156588915114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760587795013977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11715118878435557,0.16552187361476753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985391809642457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421005686263417,0.11113075257410693,0.13167674820561082,0.09716675225804466,0.09265322369447694,0.0,0.0,0.11470648960780933,0.2048857856313564,0.0,0.1037759276866618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23692228846840785,0.0,0.11319373459996625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19456417582800334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032137215272755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285378531641156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14842878080900462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3517292679941421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09251535912037256,0.09685306496116293,0.3981061603207586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696342888301026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293387521541105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764799150642645,0.0,0.08229420288007677,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dothackjhe,2020/04/07,"How were you accurately diagnosed for having a Bipolar Type-1 disorder? To those who are having a Bipolar type-1 as diagnosed by a doctor or knows someone else who do, how were you or that person you know diagnosed with Bipolar Type-1 disorder? 

What were the measures your doctor employed in order to come up with that diagnosis? 

Physical exam? What were those?

Interview? What questions were asked?

Medical tests? What were they?

For clarification, I am not asking these questions in order to save myself the money from an actual medical consultation. This is for the essay I am writing which requires a streamlined series of events that happen when a patient consults a doctor for a potential neurological disorder, like Bipolar Type-1 disorder.",7.1989381818181775,10.242149432,7.816218181818183,59.2641090909091,66.68,10.305454545454547,36.163636363636364,10.436869588844218,5.0921199999999995,609,31,74,18,11,201,75,125,0.092,0.863,0.045,-0.7236,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,4,1,1,3,2,0,0,11,0,13,13,0,2,0,16,19,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,13,0,0,1,14,3,0,1,5,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,6,0,8,2,16,13,0,8,0,0,0,0,16,3,0,4,3,68,22,10,0.0,0.0,0.12770440888033402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446803919273083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1127277681406934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3984726853959617,0.0,0.0,0.5999260305760974,0.4018346175255371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093200989360044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572262316769755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383888907051912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393355133784127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636634707339607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426541703914035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931953103256539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108806618397524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Marysol97,2020/04/07,"Too much I’ve had enough with myself 
Not letting my words come out like water but to curl back in my throat to feel but not to feel good 
I don’t want to be here anymore. 
It’s harder and harder to even explain the depth of this sorrow I have the pain that runs completely from head to toe just trying to gasp for air and I just can’t can’t go on my mental health has been the most time consuming I’ve ever had to deal with. Takes away from my smile and replaces it with a frown with dark thoughts that run and run until I can’t think no more and lay on my pillow until I don’t feel Any more pain I hate it here and I don’t ever imagine having a genuine smile I have about to be a two year old daughter and she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me but this mental health just eats me alive without chewing just whole without any explanation to know my worth or who I am as a person with a layer of heavy garbage that is so hard to just pick from and just to let me sink down with it and let me convert with that pile of that filthy garbage I’ve became and just so off with myself don’t even recognize myself or my smile I  can’t even look at myself in the mirror why does it have to hurry so bad? Why do I have to feel like a piece of shit who just hurts every time I  speak, breathe, see or just to walk in this earth in general I don’t feel like a good mom or anything in ghat matter I’m just a piece of shit living with a narcissist who is in denial so he makes me feel like I’m crazy when he obviously doesn’t understand to the core and it hurts more then ever where was my best friend who betrayed me ? Where are you? Your there but your someone else but a complete stranger someone once I shared a smile with someone who loved me when I didn’t love myself to come to know that it was all bullshit . I’m never gonna be me I hope I do be me I miss her she was fun and happy. I’m sorry I’m all over the place but sometimes you gotta let it all out to be all out",2.392392907695747,3.1017448868360304,3.5650406019518748,94.38106757058779,74.72748267898383,6.326126797288238,21.588989048647843,6.0311780096671335,-0.01049424122774356,1548,33,373,8,31,503,191,433,0.14800000000000002,0.695,0.157,0.3001,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,4,0,2,31,25,3,0,18,0,38,15,6,2,10,82,71,32,0,2,24,2,7,4,1,2,4,1,1,1,24,27,3,0,13,0,1,7,17,10,0,1,8,10,47,15,61,52,15,43,0,4,2,2,24,21,2,6,19,261,71,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11383294297780655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300441097402864,0.0,0.0,0.06887506560450861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078635591191433,0.0643574212071178,0.06988305867417599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17566856880709178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14419420042345366,0.17550831840172829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08628738822141345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732433472527569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856423863871559,0.06991766321770912,0.0,0.0,0.08648082974394579,0.0,0.16584219251187893,0.30283300496849586,0.07051788802245489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539167082728186,0.17937833039310916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466368716558499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047566634203462715,0.14040126064413105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401251436888487,0.08909645148517477,0.0749755998483277,0.08263293902586008,0.08589672739080267,0.1779308732461571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312948232982642,0.0,0.0,0.17919761008644353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199478505347164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34234125565211443,0.0,0.1635594754947331,0.0,0.07390551875672405,0.0,0.07028395754623053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15107866862352076,0.0,0.05586804541996712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16869271765871874,0.0,0.0,0.0980242972304022,0.0,0.0,0.061526537650900284,0.0,0.06455187944579913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782536880343249,0.08913401183455444,0.0,0.0,0.17811789591868166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308053161066502,0.08744500005241497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0666952524979269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17182645288711376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21274724906003228,0.0,0.08277795158238438,0.09369134882121248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292933129214913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0556042174280603,0.053629320170512265,0.0,0.06644565031204858,0.0976081725643808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0568244109611365,0.0,0.08175929222396514,0.08713097976252313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04936634808069813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1510460968594918,0.09344412276099556,0.0,0.16136082587363146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053897784301850084
mentalhealth,fuckmelifem8,2020/04/07,"I get heartaches so often it's becoming annoying. So I've never spoke with anyone about that, not even my therapist because I don't want anyone to know that about me, but I've had a rough childhood imo, atleast I might just be a whiny kid, idk. I grew up kind of, not wealthy enough to be comfortable I guess. And I've always felt subordinate to everyone around me, family, classmates, etc so I just distanced myself from everybody so I don't get into any situations that'd upset me, I just played games, with games I mean like 1-2 games tops at a time, and basically had no real life since I didn't want anyone to know that I ""struggle"" with anything. I just lived in my little world online, where I could be who  I wanted to be without being judged I guess. So i've had no friends for most of my life. Now I can't really interact with people without feeling self conscious as hell and people think im doing it to be the cool mysterious kid, which doesn't help. so whatever, I now when people talk to me/become my friends I just feel like shit and get heartaches from the smallest conflict/problem or if they do the smallest thing I feel like they don't like me and just pr etending to do so, which makes me act a little different because I feel like they don't really want to talk to me, and just doing it out of pity, so they feel like they did something wrong. even if they get close to someone I get the stupid heartaches and feel like shit, I feel like I'm so toxic and annoying as a friend but I can't stop my feelings, I try to not act upon it but that doesn't stop me from feeling like shit. idk what to do if there's anything to be done anyways",4.701767507002803,4.888116947058826,5.404873949579834,85.14931372549022,69.23529411764707,8.476190476190476,28.837535014005603,8.269060116576782,1.7661652661064422,1302,43,278,17,21,423,153,340,0.16699999999999998,0.669,0.16399999999999998,0.4166,1,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,6,1,28,27,7,2,9,1,29,5,3,1,1,65,57,27,0,8,19,0,11,9,3,1,2,1,0,3,14,16,0,2,15,4,0,3,17,11,0,0,8,13,43,16,38,39,3,24,1,1,0,0,21,13,4,9,17,181,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515491081601976,0.0,0.0,0.05324916816113475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16425520132121368,0.0,0.1288744665487111,0.06970685116598507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546635832252508,0.17296046213475955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06251909409019248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08181064972640324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801318219233611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090860387660632,0.0873292700489814,0.10343764662218566,0.0,0.0,0.07482249462980177,0.0,0.0,0.0738177137800704,0.0,0.3563341106021622,0.3915810099014987,0.07518378508458591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18149162070617286,0.0,0.2045521302025062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17252060030017308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0524852870249056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458138058534106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154120333830568,0.08606727808512904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061636952567663,0.3442968796386852,0.15696165980452792,0.06914355885677075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0522682954086806,0.0,0.0,0.08529563197674479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306780000949822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06039260329756765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16285767778591692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492601933864912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912669824877922,0.10032664845063664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168778589791642,0.0,0.2411327190082683,0.0647735896817303,0.08801658507131538,0.0,0.0,0.06634642980415703,0.06028197648877205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093071770533302,0.0,0.08185997808484477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587501795922051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909165746355398,0.05202146666580254,0.05017381811315743,0.0,0.0,0.045659488886227916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05316303937634155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18474208971037248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1509638515317976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561275059327786,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cyclone_Cupid,2020/04/07,Struggling to manage my mental health during quarantine. Feeling more and more depressed as this goes on. In the past I have realized that spending too much time at home with video games and shows makes me depressed. Obviously the solution to that was going out more and seeing friends irl but now that I can't do that I feel like I have no choice but to be depressed again. The way I feel is pretty much a feeling of boredom but not enjoying anything I do. Any tips to alleviate this feeling. When this goes on too long it leads to more serious depressive thoughts and it is just terrible.,5.461339285714287,6.917689598214286,5.4628571428571435,80.83214285714288,68.19642857142857,8.814285714285715,32.75,9.188382445141503,2.9124964285714285,473,21,87,9,8,148,75,112,0.233,0.647,0.12,-0.953,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,6,10,0,1,4,0,9,1,0,2,1,21,18,9,0,0,5,0,5,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,9,6,0,0,7,3,1,2,3,7,0,0,2,6,8,3,13,15,6,14,0,4,1,0,2,5,0,0,7,64,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858385688949148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434992491495499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6007703050199781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4408568938540219,0.1245765575644744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472496140744744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910373562419343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853569683545672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17491658684045944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519288409669408,0.0,0.0,0.15432013215886228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639949085861097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17573325054980804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563775984294017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16646470753832304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17740636852810854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13895767025833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822990341711148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843763117095842,0.10168193199464233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13841411698876846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arthur46264,2020/04/07,"Periodic Mental Functionality Is anybody else in the boat where on the first of December you can remember your friends names, brush your teeth and floss twice a day, and form a cohesive verbal sentence, and on the first of January you're making loud noises in your head to get the barber to stop reading your mind?  Thank you for coming to my TED talk, fuck this shit.",15.888695652173915,8.394871855072466,13.76934782608696,57.79141304347827,55.08695652173913,17.27826086956522,48.99275362318841,13.023866798666859,5.896588405797101,294,10,54,6,2,93,52,69,0.129,0.7809999999999999,0.09,-0.6187,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,6,0,2,1,4,2,0,6,0,2,4,3,1,0,9,7,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,3,0,2,7,2,10,7,1,11,0,0,0,1,9,5,2,0,5,34,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21852783595248665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16360634071733546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119219163177325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4315699884744239,0.0,0.0,0.19599700375612955,0.23452841508126704,0.1325403491653143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26035479786272536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16933722755377695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25565559795501713,0.0,0.2561503193591006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25375443022775124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2873765348065772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26040480684066003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120926707528052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20390301991708235,0.0,0.2335597817768677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nickv656,2020/04/07,"I’m frustrated that I can’t kill myself This is a really weird thing to complain about, but this is kinda a venting post I guess. The idea that if life ever gets too hard, or to stressful, or too much, or whatever, I could kill myself, was always comforting to me. I doubt I’d ever actually do it, but it was a comforting thought. After my uncle passed a few years ago, I realized how easily death can devastate family members, and after some thought I realized I could never kill myself. My parents are great, and my little sister and maybe older brother wouldn’t be able to handle it. That’s it I guess, people often talk about how important it is to remember these reasons, but to me it’s only frustrating and depressing I guess",5.663748043818469,6.298831274647888,7.016854460093898,72.85717527386542,67.23943661971829,10.536463223787168,30.56651017214398,10.504223727775694,3.376283881064163,579,21,102,15,9,198,86,142,0.285,0.61,0.105,-0.986,1,0,0,0,0,3,17.0,0,0,0,0,9,13,5,2,5,0,13,1,0,3,3,33,20,13,4,4,7,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,13,4,0,0,7,0,0,1,3,10,0,0,4,1,17,3,10,12,3,11,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,11,8,80,30,0,0.13957660388076756,0.0,0.13620663122046273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372623776992668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613891567741015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2228811214943351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021712439890392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525100582430641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158040013915429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292301471582227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153883698527244,0.461278095540381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250332214381945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756499645877095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.46326249659924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858708309155656,0.0,0.13989242517804445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022345896889105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026048637422407,0.0,0.10765008153753718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061542968139777,0.0,0.0,0.1549833008321624,0.0,0.0,0.09676484279752852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367580398085438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894163465092243,0.1435079952399785,0.0,0.0,0.15811308336409835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988452816530044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218638713157443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092728493598511,0.0,0.0,0.22161646524676684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08988275670049974
mentalhealth,p2unya,2020/04/07,Angst and Joy I go through periods where the darkness and doom am anxiety are so intense I would welcome an end but would not create one for myself. Today I told my family in a group message that if I were to die in this pandemic I would want them to know that I would consider an early death to be a merciful one. I don’t know why but I felt strongly that I needed to tell them that. I would want them to know that I was finally free from the angst and that I had been saved from more years of the same. And then we had our daily group video with my precious grand baby. Those moments are priceless. Life itself is such an oxymoron.,4.737923076923078,4.9027926000000015,5.361346153846156,85.56740384615388,69.15384615384616,8.653846153846155,28.55769230769231,8.472884824447931,1.8139230769230763,498,16,106,7,8,161,84,130,0.133,0.6709999999999999,0.196,0.8484,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,2,0,3,1,3,8,0,0,8,0,16,1,0,0,0,24,25,9,2,9,4,0,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,4,1,1,1,2,1,0,2,7,1,20,8,13,12,2,12,1,1,0,0,11,3,0,1,8,82,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14157929744457928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19207514247306212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16391854018147572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17446907050823415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17769779676568614,0.2027369345418852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051804775497666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051315986314169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072157200397214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722827545189398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508186648624887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16176077004627207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17542627412752435,0.1768438823513562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21832009571271466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16699836834947965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6573479127072662,0.0,0.0,0.11918006784953936
mentalhealth,KasturiBaranwal,2020/04/07,"I don’t know what’s happening to me I. Don’t. Know. 

I don’t know what’s happening to me. Let me start y giving you a quick backstory. My boyfriend broke with me last December. He is my first love and fought hard. He didn’t want me back, whatever. I start therapy to get over him and trauma caused. I’m on antidepressants and taking Xanax for anxiety. But it’s not helping and I don’t know what I even need help for to be honest. I feel like no one can understand the pain and agony I’m going through. I’m obviously not over my ex and I don’t think I’ll ever be. I didn’t even believe in love until this happened so now that I don’t have that, I can’t function. Whenever anyone asked why I loved him so much, I always had one answer. He gave me peace and calm. It was a long distance relationship but we talked all the time. I went to him for everything. My therapist told me that my anxiety has an attachment to him. Makes sense because he was the first person ever that I opened up to about my anxiety but it wasn’t anything too bad in the beginning. Ever since the breakup, I literally can’t shut my brain off. I’m constantly thinking about stuff and can never relax or feel at ease. NEVER. I’m already taking anxiety medication, so I don’t know what else to do. I don’t want to die or anything but I also don’t want to exist. My life is great on paper and yet I’m always worrying about million thing. I don’t know what is happening to me. Send help!",0.5471756440281013,2.8003605606557405,2.8970960187353647,89.81295081967214,86.01639344262293,6.633255269320843,21.173302107728336,7.859703344183488,1.050979391100702,1141,38,249,24,35,390,150,305,0.124,0.748,0.128,0.2591,0,0,0,0,0,1,33.0,1,1,0,2,17,13,1,0,8,0,29,8,1,2,7,45,71,20,1,4,8,1,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,15,12,0,0,12,1,0,3,20,5,0,5,10,3,42,8,29,58,2,33,0,1,0,3,26,11,0,2,20,164,57,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10439631603507538,0.07565366104979039,0.1574338750068759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28948290497304763,0.0,0.0,0.06614833405024809,0.0,0.15569975005797293,0.0,0.08844065592188874,0.0,0.0,0.07274355609229345,0.07898921527955392,0.057668863847998214,0.0,0.0,0.10658472876563084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560778298675974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718292455846557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10223179701723073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09818255779588718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902832899023926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496824357035766,0.2567203898594897,0.0,0.0,0.08502271238362702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956678290530565,0.06758411277698376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093783797394204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04942595131413125,0.09075142941457658,0.053764834861321435,0.0,0.0,0.10429969497401696,0.0,0.0,0.33462704934666965,0.0,0.08474534328477684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1902303758924192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31194667287238514,0.0771137413725636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967375629187016,0.06682061058603263,0.04621804935978902,0.0,0.0,0.08372031961298793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561476065828278,0.0,0.06314796676975462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530216177388204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954379244577115,0.07014662549410894,0.14592670667199187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12821033342511914,0.0,0.10066383106855199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826033369697399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156778300691237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825624418775891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339204073286316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829733781284907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14225875601723714,0.07603798238569508,0.0,0.0,0.10818631209079822,0.10984090429992288,0.0628497605028157,0.12123504599291685,0.0,0.0,0.055163533923714834,0.0,0.0,0.09039683363632647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984846377441642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16739718481523533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08769755335626547,0.08536412750333464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960735273509684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nottheflyingjew,2020/04/07,"My boss is a dick, what do I do? After being off work for 4 months at the end of last year with anxiety and depression I was recently questioning my bosses policy during the COVID-19 pandemic and was told “it’s not like you turn up anyway.” Now I feel like I’m back to square one and if I go back it’s only going to be a matter of time before he invents a reason to sack me. I’m thinking of making a complaint to HR. What do u guys think?",2.2125563909774435,3.0627578947368437,4.732330827067671,85.3063157894737,75.3157894736842,7.954887218045112,23.045112781954884,8.418075326091056,1.2634060150375943,340,9,75,6,7,121,69,95,0.18600000000000005,0.802,0.012,-0.9298,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,1,4,3,0,0,6,0,8,1,1,4,0,15,18,4,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,5,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,3,2,8,2,13,13,0,15,0,1,1,1,5,3,1,2,12,49,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16983736240001013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3414246157150477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18891451421092773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19121724804526466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19663533451124507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11225513820526946,0.15860428725843326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523472740076065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21982521863551865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18096812232462733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21692615249307048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481936782152598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17720659785689385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15044000517664727,0.16884892735908838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487024780692537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282636858890947,0.2192085046248434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845106234345406,0.0,0.0,0.12945606032438425,0.0,0.0,0.2121404688202314,0.0,0.0,0.2414835833131019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162622872009558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14296743054642833
mentalhealth,weimankowart,2020/04/07,"Made a comic about staying at home during this period - how it is important but also mentally and emotionally challenging. For the next comic, would love to hear your thoughts about coping at home! I made a comic about staying at home and how it can be more difficult than it seems. You can find the full comic and other COVID19 infocomics I've illustrated [here](https://www.comicsforgood.com/weimankow/thoughts-on-staying-at-home).

Now, I'm gathering advice and opinions (to put into new comics) on coping strategies for staying at home for long periods of time. Please contribute your thoughts [here](https://forms.gle/Pm6gsgQ3HL83aWNaA).

From 4 points of view:  
1 - Student/Child  
2 - Working adult  
3 - Parents of young kids  
4 - Senior Citizen/Elderly

I would like to hear what are your biggest fears, and what has helped or can help. I will definitely appreciate any comments from mental health professional especially. Thank you all :)",8.85905525846702,11.20224814379085,7.495983363042189,66.09374331550804,61.02614379084967,10.792394533571004,36.78490790255496,10.832165505486646,4.617397385620915,758,35,109,20,11,229,103,153,0.046,0.745,0.209,0.9789,1,0,0,0,0,0,47.0,0,5,0,2,7,6,0,1,4,0,10,2,0,4,1,20,20,10,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,3,1,2,4,2,7,6,0,0,4,5,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,3,8,4,21,12,3,22,0,0,1,1,15,9,0,3,10,64,15,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338140716536605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097138286178726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858622406195349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202734357382735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420794407487876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540084578969192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13421021237484912,0.28461207521713394,0.0,0.1692610231912311,0.0,0.5066028534268129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061685056509835225,0.0,0.0,0.1117375726125236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139560540076768,0.2389436213922745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25448405945544444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194427262433136,0.1342806798588818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14019860217935842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859735815791827,0.11935805522375298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692781557700694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149438492753681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.403734305673688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624474853580767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20047526721071945,0.07362417398617134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919199731105647,0.0,0.0,0.17938528393040204,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vanazal,2020/04/07,"please help i'm suicidal  

I'm 13 years old, I suffer with chronic depression. I used to have a psychiatrist but my parents won't let me see him anymore. I am extremely suicidal and I self harm constantly. I have broken so many self harm contracts it's insane. I've been depressed for about 3 years now. I have antidepressants and sometimes i take more than I'm supposed to hoping I feel somewhat better. My sister tried throwing my pills away because she thinks I'm faking everything and I'm only feelings this was because I want to get high. My parents think I'm doing this because I want attention, I was at the doctors and I had to take a depression test. I was completely honest because I really wanted help. They told me I needed to go to the ER or they'd call cps. My father was furious and told me that no one in my family would ever love me or care for me again and that I've ""lost"" everyone. Currently, I've been getting worse. I used to self harm by digging into my skin until I bled or it ripped, but now I cut and take too many pills. I even have my suicide planned. I just don't know what to do anymore my sister won't let me talk to my nephew anymore because she thinks I'm a threat to him. I've had my antidepressants for a couple of months and I'm not getting any better. I love my parents but they don't seem to understand the whole mental illness thing. Funniest part is I told my dad that I was going to kill myself and I told him exactly how I was going to do it and he laughed at me. My parents do not care if I live or die they constantly tell me I'd be better off dead. But I love them they show me love sometimes. I'm supposed to move in with my brother next month because he thinks I'm not safe with my parents and sister. He thinks I'll be mentally healthier with him. I don't know If I'm going to make it that long, my suicide date is April 25th. I don't wanna hurt anymore I've tried everything I used to draw but that doesn't help me at all. Nothing helps me I feel like a lost cause. I have nothing to live for I'm not excited for the future as much as I used to be.",1.8085897435897456,3.5249208393665192,3.7268325791855226,88.52895173453999,78.16289592760181,6.795776772247361,24.907993966817497,7.702957570686157,1.2560645550527902,1649,60,354,25,39,558,188,442,0.218,0.629,0.154,-0.9901,6,0,0,0,0,3,33.0,0,0,6,6,10,30,4,0,9,0,36,10,1,7,3,64,93,27,7,9,16,12,4,1,0,3,5,0,0,3,13,16,0,1,13,1,0,6,12,15,1,1,16,5,74,15,43,68,6,33,0,7,1,4,45,9,0,9,19,217,87,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042354492159438255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470715124695464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851681320792498,0.0,0.0,0.22780238253633664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16525243013807184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359778110302683,0.0,0.12700308816101472,0.06398167133024471,0.0,0.0,0.0653024115972428,0.1346113273699987,0.0,0.0,0.06891481880775005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16093245219691585,0.0,0.06463979317148465,0.0,0.0,0.06374916380398886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041137252882456544,0.05633842804651889,0.0,0.05951395808771667,0.11195166772455982,0.0,0.05871475344111785,0.0,0.09447628207054456,0.04449489980353233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09762069787052782,0.0,0.1415871773297976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698759845827854,0.06580527916213975,0.0,0.061860950186331365,0.0,0.0,0.06667510803859386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890677547105559,0.0,0.06845808076869507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737692313899554,0.0,0.03042826769309708,0.0,0.1099938430066302,0.055118386254353835,0.0,0.0,0.13597823534825748,0.0,0.22485091286520933,0.0,0.04157430406002024,0.12629012327303082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255329819386913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942719648327908,0.06619684156986265,0.04578508098557205,0.0461819641431946,0.0,0.0,0.06623854631803174,0.0,0.0,0.11952420060061825,0.0,0.06535540234798261,0.0,0.04220448937720557,0.04736893456439068,0.0,0.0,0.3457888213680537,0.06744628641445644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836789579519598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0399000058773374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04963138921122237,0.056699992077793526,0.19492387243677695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12319871592721658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2725094342559116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048691700775956,0.05006061733293133,0.054437979763662325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04137797599676642,0.1995417636809072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380558323508667,0.0,0.08457197031222813,0.0,0.0,0.06483867152438387,0.0,0.2151696336615516,0.0,0.0,0.11020816371926774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953660796765662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347157268087396,0.04424396886761546,0.0,0.0,0.08021626158146056
mentalhealth,engjell99,2020/04/07,Reality doesn't feel real after some bad decisions Ive made some horrible life choices in the last few weeks which have put me in a horrible position in my life. This new reality of mine feels so foreign and strange to me. What do I do?,5.017500000000002,5.379407416666666,6.875,74.27000000000002,68.58333333333334,11.4,34.75,11.20814326018867,4.062074999999999,188,9,38,6,3,66,39,48,0.239,0.7609999999999999,0.0,-0.9112,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,1,0,8,8,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,6,0,6,7,3,8,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,4,26,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2759152702429216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33417492265631193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693640988197168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4668188375436241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.312683545935842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191545130903064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3321975219196399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3761289748434453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650702500935025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Randy-Marsh-420,2020/04/07,"Need Help. Recently, I feel like I’m going insane. Everyone around me are constantly on their phones or watching T.V. This is the future I absolutely dread. I can’t stand it, am I the only one who realizes that this isn’t how life is supposed to be. My life has no meaning and I can’t stand the thoughts going through my head. I can’t take anything this world believes in, everyone is brainwashed. No, I’m not suicidal but I just don’t know what to do. Everyday I wake up and it’s worse from the last day. I just want to leave the country but I can’t. I want to leave the world but it’s impossible, I just can’t seem to be happy. I try talking to people about my problems but everyone blows me off and doesn’t listen to me. I’ve started hating T.V. and social media, I even deleted all the apps except reddit on my phone. I don’t think people understand what the world really is, it isn’t just staring and screens and I want to do something but school requires staring at more screens. I can’t focus in school and I think I’m going crazy. If someone has ever been in my shoes, what made you get over this.",1.2552874818049489,3.4623204585152862,2.9714246724890856,90.75370178311502,82.4061135371179,5.912736535662299,23.078784570596795,7.1686216300943375,0.8626810771470157,871,31,184,12,24,288,118,229,0.115,0.8140000000000001,0.07,-0.8674,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,1,1,1,9,5,1,1,8,0,24,5,3,2,2,40,48,15,1,6,13,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,13,8,0,1,9,0,0,3,14,3,0,1,3,7,28,2,22,43,2,26,0,0,5,0,9,13,0,3,9,122,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11086057242736136,0.11992664845598575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177987168988158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558116545965072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868812888394728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897927589667534,0.1218591952909434,0.0,0.3861834608782381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06811693845209038,0.09624181704417707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038404690323906,0.0,0.2296882442124421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434086998858195,0.0,0.13300509903488827,0.13825845804432949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09029793285539832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07403691337240863,0.10981229587581004,0.0,0.2852916000180401,0.0,0.0,0.19030913374633385,0.0658158976696428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747243679561496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14674625377279665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998909125188598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128769281465997,0.10245831216731424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867915433992081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890592863011566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863031287330474,0.0,0.13301673719737395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27268149415433257,0.0,0.1226412529987108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373269667126299,0.11414523580309875,0.1037116909123663,0.0,0.0,0.09535335163113356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14735847945649028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012903817700616,0.10828038259998632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17264236573312353,0.0,0.10695021143355238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914639669916604,0.0,0.0,0.1402450975233313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383786451093985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13728808273378587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bittybot5000,2020/04/07,"How do I stop cutting? I’ve been dealing with PTSD, depression w psychosis and anxiety for about 5 years now. I started cutting about two years in. At first I did it because I felt nothing and needed to feel anything. Now I think I do it more to relieve extreme emotions and to distract myself from suicidal thoughts. Something about the blood running down my arm is comforting to me and I sometimes take pictures of it to look at later. 
I can’t sleep without a knife nearby, and I even snuck one into the psych ward last time I was admitted. 

Why do I feel better when I have a knife nearby? Why am I so fascinated by the blood? 
But most importantly, how do I STOP?

I hate that I cut. On my good days I look at my scars and just cry. I can’t believe I’d do such a thing to myself. I feel so embarrassed and shameful. But on my bad days I’m drawn to it. 
After my 6th month anniversary of not cutting I got tattoos to cover the scars. But I’ve relapsed since and have so many new scars. Every time I think I’ve kicked the habit something happens and I relapse. And when I fall, I fall hard. It’s seldom a single session when I relapse. 

I’m looking for advice and tips on how to quit cutting. I’ve tried a few alternatives like clutching an ice cube or drawing the blood on with a marker, but the alternatives just aren’t the same. Nothing seems to compare to the knife. 
Am I just doomed to repeat this cycle of quitting and relapsing?",2.6415517241379334,4.458335224137934,3.948482758620688,87.41479310344829,76.06896551724137,6.295172413793104,27.806896551724137,7.087006719466742,1.4076234482758618,1125,47,227,12,25,369,154,290,0.13699999999999998,0.8079999999999999,0.055,-0.9535,1,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,4,19,17,6,3,16,0,16,5,5,3,0,42,36,26,1,1,10,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,15,0,2,9,0,0,3,5,12,0,3,6,8,34,5,36,30,5,34,1,2,3,0,2,10,0,3,22,152,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12315356653456813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964114379214696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10371069606683833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522851186807528,0.0768257882088149,0.0,0.0,0.14199093327077178,0.0,0.1114619439658794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843636123053896,0.16255587975841773,0.12992982316152585,0.10854814028499768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417650706731217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324061870430928,0.0,0.106184425202107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191171350087618,0.0,0.12100709927850273,0.0,0.0,0.10719975589912566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570670490302404,0.1007964838566998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144656365091657,0.0,0.11289675850108805,0.12442702666347172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273002739039644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061571146622528064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3174965321110864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12777309203811393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005947258431619,0.0,0.0,0.0934485168283844,0.0,0.12171908585887582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2418554402881972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540015586107001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14732054228070146,0.0,0.0,0.2680935912422627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473158974837032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042520563233666,0.0,0.12611949060540864,0.0,0.0,0.19404575349523676,0.12464538367037352,0.0,0.08920360280883886,0.0,0.0,0.21073089547367135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13785469568810932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475772827288938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372771834192577,0.16150791511147602,0.0,0.10005253111548676,0.1469764337734634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556506135627934,0.0,0.12311150678489377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274421912485486,0.0,0.0,0.12148695193532227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16231641094913954
mentalhealth,heehiho,2020/04/07,"I’m afraid of having kids if it means they will inherit my mental conditions I don’t know if this is classified as mental condition or not. Years ago, I had very disturbing thoughts, like very disturbing thoughts. I don’t know if it was because of the way I grew up or my family situation or whatever... 
Looking back, I would ask myself, wtf man? Why did you have these thoughts, and why did you enjoy thinking about them. These thoughts were, of course internalized and I never acted on them.

Now, I’m a lot better. I’m in college, and my future is looking bright. I don’t have these thoughts anymore except for the usual intrusive thoughts. I read a reddit post on how these intrusive thoughts may actually be OCD. My mind is in tip top shape and has never been better. However, every night I think about my past and am very afraid that when I have kids, that they might go through what I went through. If that’s the case, it might be better for me not to. Sorry for the grammar.",3.949284467713788,5.6104835445026255,4.5739057591623045,84.94941012216408,72.19371727748691,8.025270506108201,27.91657940663176,8.648137234880735,2.0221808726003485,771,29,153,14,15,246,110,191,0.057,0.835,0.107,0.7649,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,4,4,6,10,0,4,6,0,25,0,0,1,2,36,45,15,0,5,10,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,3,12,5,0,0,12,1,1,4,7,4,0,0,14,3,24,6,18,24,1,24,0,0,3,0,10,7,0,11,12,106,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.10684635375395224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705619506890173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10858456553698864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235828168242207,0.0,0.0,0.08419097899559118,0.0,0.06674403020339545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905047716933505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922499677264156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321733864483508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062225636546664326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12034557741546302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05349123732596058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838878899282956,0.0,0.0,0.0930844023425297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926660526088828,0.0,0.0,0.22068014508237674,0.2323029745843108,0.11055359258945208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16889073007002786,0.0,0.0,0.10274885935320947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452050393343353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486106375661246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10951953512046506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12307124133829045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12256498524528998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403134209959324,0.0,0.6084592843204175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058766239779398,0.2710219164842864,0.0,0.08690799072732411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014982394208837,0.197595219471862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777848751728081,0.0,0.0,0.07050790943693226
mentalhealth,Lexepercival,2020/04/07,"An actual question, why is it bad to self harm? I know everyone sees self harming as bad and i did too. Im in recovery as i had selfharmed for 3 straight years. But after relapsing quite awhile ago i realized how it can help relieve emotions. Now thats not the question. The question is why is it bad to self harm? Im asking this geninuely because say your a mentally healthy person and as a form of art you use ur skin. Your completely stable so why should people prevent you from doing it? Yes you can get a infection but if you treat ur wounds 100% of the time there should be no problem. If your mentally sound then you dont want to die. If you have no want to die then why would people stop self harmers. I get it can get to a point where its really severe bodily damage but if your mentally sound i dont think you would even cut that deep in the first place.. 

Am i wrong to think self harm could be a positive outlet?",2.5187896825396834,4.21832639153439,3.938568121693123,87.86436011904762,76.08994708994709,7.687962962962962,24.510912698412696,8.472884824447931,1.5159230158730157,724,24,154,14,16,239,110,189,0.223,0.648,0.129,-0.9673,0,0,0,0,0,2,16.0,0,11,0,2,7,13,1,0,10,1,20,3,1,2,0,29,31,16,2,12,8,0,1,0,0,4,2,3,0,6,9,2,0,2,7,1,0,0,5,11,0,1,2,5,18,2,16,22,1,16,0,1,1,0,25,7,0,7,9,96,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.09270810934384513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421341514064043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881391303548411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23796774990368985,0.05791225093552998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960764075445666,0.0,0.0,0.07585125333850633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19719385974221731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226829403630752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10686430348622138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274783130542112,0.0,0.0,0.09077834665033054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080853198646916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14890364943424916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367774294565241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20523661834395507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05221053671037523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2872185849330748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172465314398785,0.08295195811924723,0.0992567216222456,0.0,0.08980746323911958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090394794113374,0.0,0.0,0.3192714698782712,0.10104617012213024,0.0,0.0,0.06086062297427216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554929067363526,0.0,0.0,0.07570418099084085,0.0,0.4955382857808015,0.10732505847353543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942580729122889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217467093547748,0.0,0.0,0.05539634745538145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08205110288734267,0.0,0.0,0.1120691146667204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3428976014437152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13497318854616014,0.10386961821437812,0.0,0.061178081872010126
mentalhealth,maimoomoo420,2020/04/07,Healthy ways to cope with suicidal thoughts? I’ve always had suicidal thoughts for quite some time now but they’ve worsened over the past few months and I find myself I guess fantasizing about hanging myself or just overdosing...please give me some healthy ways I can cope with these thoughts I do not want to do drugs anymore to cope.,5.433225806451612,7.608600387096777,3.9008387096774193,89.18125806451616,69.3225806451613,7.540645161290323,31.754838709677426,8.238735603445708,2.214409032258065,272,12,52,4,5,77,44,62,0.16399999999999998,0.753,0.083,-0.6466,0,0,1,0,0,1,5.0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,0,15,10,3,2,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,7,0,8,6,3,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,4,4,30,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17149593182789966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20440085075837428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23901645114999556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18837630320783372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19771476693293533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22704797487584236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645111032556395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967506138651932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262414784354454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192181155689742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4508909962532183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4908732184326583,0.12018152577079427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121566112308007,0.3271932277762761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DominoKnox,2020/04/07,"I dont know what, or who I am.... I just know my flaws. -Very poor at communication
-Do not stay connected to loved ones
  -Selfish 
  - Afraid of conflict
  - A liar
  - A cheater
  -Runs when things get too complicated
  - Lazy
  - Unmotivated
  - Freeloader
  - Burnout
  - Look for any reason to do the wrong thing
  - Falsely justify my wrong doings for what little peace of mind I can salvage
  - Have a very addictive personality
  - Poor hygiene
  - Unhealthy diet/overweight/out of shape
  - Never learn lessons/repetitive behavior
  - I get mean towards the people I love
  - When things go wrong in a situation involving the turmoil I bestowed on others, I contemplate how I can benefit, get out unscathed
  - I'm depressed
  - I'm angry
  - I'm afraid
  - I'm confused
  - I don't want to be like this",1.9242222222222232,4.504305570370376,3.1234074074074094,82.28733333333336,100.70370370370372,6.011851851851853,27.62222222222222,7.24861992348623,2.326991111111112,592,30,101,13,25,190,94,135,0.325,0.568,0.107,-0.9835,1,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,0,1,5,14,1,4,7,0,10,3,0,2,1,15,25,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,8,1,0,1,5,0,2,2,4,10,0,1,0,1,12,4,13,24,0,13,0,1,1,2,5,7,0,2,4,59,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17518757499705984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928204385358717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13841134986929274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883401221297471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518785810380094,0.0,0.09132995895579744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17663389650700442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851028580175583,0.1610644032802926,0.0,0.0,0.13494818511840292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900774636578809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175050264935508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16226198129831526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239423515880222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889501027602932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111409689580114,0.14031772615906493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16522717073394386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18063441442878486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712856539323037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202873808824776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265189953662363,0.09478548607669944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5271032405491816,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unusuallyalice,2020/04/07,"Does it even make sense? Does it even make sense to just up and leave from temporarily staying with my family to go back to the city I reside in just to end my life? 

4 of us, including me, are staying in a basement bachelor apartment of my aunt's house. She lives upstairs with her son and her friend. That's 7 people total in a 3 bedroom / 1 basement bachelor house. 

This pandemic was going to happen either way, and it was the most opportune time for entities who were already targeting me to make me a sort of prisoner. They have done it in a multitude of ways previously, primarily in psychiatric hospitals and wards. 

I'm a starseed, and they have done so many things to target me into killing myself. I can sadly say these beings or entities are winning. Everything is full of turmoil, especially my family's place, because these entities pass through everyone in my life. I don't sleep much anymore because of all my research, it's the only time it is quiet (late night/early early morn), etc. They made my aunt seriously ill (not with COVID-19) and a voice had told me ""(her name) is dead."" Which she survived but still. There's a whole history to this but they added so many things to cause turmoil in this reality.

It's really hard to say this is just a mental health issue when the evidence is clear, especially because I get my invega trinza shots and all. Plus, it's questionable now if they are just lying to me about everything at the psychosis clinic. Either way, I speak to my psychiatrist weekly now via phone appointments. 

I don't want to kill myself where my family could find my corpse even though this body I made a deal for at birth. I'd have to go back to my hoarder den of an apartment. The beings have won. I'm giving up because even though I'm meant to be a double agent and plant seeds, it's all too much.

Does it make sense to go all that way? Or is it better to just run off somewhere in my hometown?",5.426580459770117,6.037813111405836,6.217417108753318,78.46504697170646,67.75331564986736,9.784659593280283,30.29719274977896,9.827888789773867,2.7872954022988514,1521,55,294,33,24,501,194,377,0.087,0.8370000000000001,0.076,0.4107,0,0,0,0,0,3,47.0,1,0,5,5,23,11,2,2,17,0,26,7,2,7,6,47,46,19,3,3,13,3,1,0,1,0,5,5,2,0,24,13,0,0,3,0,0,6,3,6,0,0,11,6,39,5,48,31,14,44,0,1,0,0,25,19,0,6,13,204,63,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977002285514062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780261942727527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615541861594535,0.0,0.21587969354613384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783017358702787,0.0,0.09834207843226228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094951145082616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068774335863696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912753746514612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23243190339941475,0.18120344657607976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841545410835195,0.0,0.098739578983885,0.23390530283443303,0.0,0.0,0.0845986874060308,0.1591385356768703,0.0,0.25038787027908155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809190998878306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684016794811149,0.0,0.04625571977213125,0.0849305390449982,0.20126521139749234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829093123762139,0.0,0.07930968947992628,0.0,0.0,0.09410823210879317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043142835818543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240721109246124,0.0,0.0,0.1959010271049857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987098312558756,0.09374545003016957,0.0,0.0,0.12506933528203187,0.0,0.0,0.07817775056559799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675473228527111,0.2363903639622211,0.17952055290117466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08922214081716526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016636361000672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08308380615386199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733461891516686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06137880434152788,0.0,0.09249990416560644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917911144580016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056717587489989826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081267309406226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08859862559459612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18873239264635894,0.07070391532528478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763702396286005,0.0,0.17396976073317275,0.0,0.1032505758199248,0.0,0.0,0.0845986874060308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649632735527544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222005218975851,0.28109885405107754,0.07101718550322693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09884581617073876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnonMouse1412,2020/04/07,"I don't know what to do My dad asked my why I'm not taking care of myself and I couldn't bring myself to say the truth, which is that I hate myself and I don't personally care if I die.  I stayed silent while he hugged me and told me his nagging is because he loves me and wants to see me in good health...   
I've been avoiding my family because I'm mad at them but once he asked me that, I realized I'm not mad at them... I'm mad at myself.   
Because a part of me knows they're correct and looking out for me but I don't know why I can't bring myself to admit and accept that.   
I know I should seek therapy, but between college, CoVid19 economical issues and other family matters, it isn't an available option.    
I don't know what to do.",2.6525557461406493,3.194008194968553,4.518970840480275,88.40891938250431,73.9685534591195,7.291252144082332,24.51743853630646,7.348242739294969,0.8829949685534588,569,16,131,6,11,195,81,159,0.147,0.759,0.094,-0.8453,0,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,0,0,13,5,1,3,0,13,3,0,0,2,30,36,12,1,4,6,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,8,8,0,1,8,0,0,2,9,6,0,0,2,3,30,7,14,32,1,9,0,0,2,2,14,5,0,2,1,83,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29393749794100843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28749857243628746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205691365889686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631576285767285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964044117067545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13185905178072455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552108711248926,0.0,0.16710531031642348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16408485569285455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.431988468987775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201556673957193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14188683134038854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742194803658306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17024151235285867,0.0,0.0,0.13726841992164646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12501852870143199,0.0,0.0,0.1252748403013753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16756337003266306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820124570547752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17978164881273742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15021948234033375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927256609795996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837124825759835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rocktathan,2020/04/07,I feel... nothing? I don’t know what’s happening but it’s been happening for as long as I can remember. It used to happen a lot more often but recently my life has been a lot better so I thought it would go away. It didn’t. It feels bad. I think of things that would normally make me sad and I don’t feel sad. I think of things that would make me happy and I don’t feel happy. I think of suicidal thoughts and my body doesn’t tell me not to. I thought it was because I wasn’t happy in the past but it’s still happening. I don’t know what’s happening or why it’s happening.,-0.8205952380952404,1.2548870000000036,1.716170634920637,96.78473214285715,91.69841269841272,6.007142857142857,18.98611111111111,7.413659706084162,0.43614444444444395,446,14,109,9,16,152,61,126,0.14800000000000002,0.706,0.146,-0.0772,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,0,3,0,15,2,1,3,0,31,37,10,1,4,5,0,4,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,14,3,0,0,13,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,8,4,17,4,10,26,3,7,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,4,4,73,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585464868081604,0.0,0.09407249964824674,0.06868094783389822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09964508191153304,0.0,0.12514798493059645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22787191347808536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403142999559455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5977879930294744,0.3598093469295888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12383801666341825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958025464113315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997070259461424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19157143978134064,0.0,0.0,0.15041261166378272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039004451213366,0.10810732479977504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755369815620916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11124537860394346,0.0,0.1276301016485525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997626113584424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12323975300427314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847619695727768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970231193887892,0.21657799323288046,0.0,0.26833578270025904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730838339184696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166472506543538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24010687821045498,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Carossmo,2020/04/07,"Here's a comic I made coping with feeling left out and being treated differently by people [LnR: Season 2, Episode 2- Lingering Thoughts](https://tapas.io/episode/1696280) (Putting this here to understand the next episode more)

[LnR: Season 2, Episode 3- Knead You](https://tapas.io/episode/1709185)",9.993571428571428,14.831558357142859,5.1209523809523825,70.81571428571431,72.57142857142857,7.561904761904763,37.95238095238096,8.344100000000001,4.355638095238096,249,13,29,5,6,64,36,42,0.0,0.96,0.04,0.128,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,4,2,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,13,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3913008171279659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18937201549553376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4069244901464668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3543863365657745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39831352625753147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596497424492217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3765029031412016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3898956322008027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DependentLeek2,2020/04/07,"My Mother won't get Help For about eight years of my life now my mother has struggled with a mental illness. It was diagnosed but it wasn't diagnosed as a specific illness. Symptoms are related to bipolar and schizophrenia. She doesn't see people or anything like that though; she's zoned out 100 percent of the time, never has a smile on her face, can't pay attention to anything, laughs to herself occasionally, cannot hold a conversation without going on a tangent about some weird conspiracy, and never things she's wrong. The worst part is she thinks (or at least acts) like there is nothing wrong with her. There are plenty of other things I could say but hopefully you'll get the very basics of it.
She's been to the doctor before and has been put on medicine but either won't take it or won't go back to get it refilled.
Me father, brother, and I have tried relentlessly got eight years to figure something out and it never sticks. My father has finally come to his breaking point; he admits he's still madly in love with her but he has had enough. The mental stress it's put on all of us is immense. He's going to have one final discussion with her but he's made his mind up about leaving. 
She thinks there is nothing wrong when there obviously is. Is there anything we can do, or is it better to just leave?",3.881461794019933,5.7205551860465125,4.477397563676637,84.84406976744188,72.72093023255816,6.929789590254708,25.8516057585825,7.62386473244151,1.3661094130675528,1050,35,201,13,21,334,141,258,0.113,0.752,0.134,0.8399,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,2,1,0,1,14,14,1,2,10,0,31,10,1,1,5,41,47,17,0,2,12,5,0,2,0,4,8,1,0,0,12,13,0,1,5,0,1,7,11,8,0,3,7,2,23,6,33,35,8,30,0,0,1,1,32,10,0,6,14,146,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692681462624641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08386878160998228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281129365631674,0.0,0.0,0.09646433835895593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939549136518474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708423022032713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22140931417637985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163867730387568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269938551302422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2389636565752719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709551143487326,0.0,0.1859625004128155,0.0,0.08723395428238903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310791822835824,0.0,0.0,0.1083320038016068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309806471290605,0.0,0.0,0.07703999498148474,0.1065730546160688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844073633664786,0.10320551302704872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21983560607535246,0.0,0.11013050594849666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523665823556118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20931292058800624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390925761542128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811314462915574,0.0,0.07561602158958912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310724556279377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21929273939515445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867375492484489,0.0,0.0,0.08691537760920431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08396809958748412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710415338097363,0.0,0.12494033560190325,0.1140245757094208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133664168621623,0.08200773499016092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449237051640034,0.13977644401870662,0.1071615953150366,0.0,0.06360011288990347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405197448291098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119885072541315,0.0,0.0,0.08999490680321692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10514044543557036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35775568684847703,0.0,0.14047615383239925
mentalhealth,aintallthat,2020/04/07,"Student, want to rant about my life :) I want to preface this by saying nothing I have to say here is too serious, and I understand many people here have experienced or seen a lot worse, especially now. That said, I've been feeling angry and sad at random times and I decided for once in my life I should say something. I'm a 21 year old guy in the US, and I've put on a front of ""nothing can affect me most of my life"". Just writing this down publicly is cathartic for me, but if anyone wants to share similar stories or offer advice, that would be awesome.

They've been many things bringing me down. I'm afflicted with a rare condition that impacts my vocal cords, making my voice come out nasally and apparently heavily accented. I've been bullied (verbally) for this in middle school, but I had friends to support me and this never really affected me. However, recently it's undermining my confidence when speaking publicly or to people I don't know, although my close friends always make me feel comfortable. Around Christmas this year, I was speaking to the plumber fixing the faucet at my parents house, and as soon as I began to speak he gave me a very patronizing appraisal—he did this thing a lot of people do, which is assume from my voice that I have some type of mental disability (I don't). 

I was talking to this girl a lot a few months ago, and I developed a crush on her, as guys do. I thought why the hell not, so I asked her out. She said no, which stung, but was no less than I expected. However, I encountered her again in front of a group of her friends, and she proceeded to mock me for it, implying she was somehow better than me. That really hurt—partly because though I think I'm an interesting and intelligent person and have my skills, just from talking to us and based on our appearances, many people would agree. Furthermore, I found out that a guy I'd considered a friend had told her about my crush shortly before I'd asked her out, and they'd been making fun of me around my back. The worst part about the whole thing was that while I was incredibly angry at him and did confront him, he issued a half-hearted apology, and although that by no means made me feel better about the situation, I didn't want to split my school friend group up, so I didn't make a big deal about it.

This alone, I 'd normally rebound from after a time. But a lot of other things in my life also feel like they're going downhill at the same time. I can't see any friends so I'm spending too much time alone, thinking. I started off last year excited about my research, but things went awry somewhere along the way, and my research mentor told me a few weeks ago told me to step up, that my project so far was a disappointment. I'd saved up for a trip next month to Cabo with some good friends, which I was really excited about, but now it's cancelled. My internship for this summer was cancelled last week—without that, I'm not going to have the money to do a lot of things I wanted to do next year, and my job search next year is going to be much more stressful. I was going to meet with my doctor last week---he was going to talk about some new operation that might be able to help my condition, but all that is postponed indefinitely due to COVID. All in all, I'm seriously starting to question my own competence, which is out of character for me, and I have nothing to look forward to to take my mind off things.

Anyway, if you actually read through all this, you have my respect (and thanks!).",8.90016932752782,6.43886335413643,8.67788534107402,73.75257063376878,62.04789550072569,12.031369134010644,38.061006289308175,10.4301,3.693328553459121,2757,104,549,49,30,894,302,689,0.107,0.747,0.146,0.9859,5,2,1,0,0,0,85.0,3,2,1,4,30,30,3,1,31,0,50,6,1,7,5,102,103,44,0,12,16,1,4,1,7,4,5,10,0,5,38,32,0,0,14,1,2,15,11,9,0,0,33,19,84,21,94,62,24,86,1,2,3,0,61,33,1,21,40,380,122,11,0.05799431141628617,0.0,0.05659408216229859,0.0,0.0,0.056671369915057876,0.10281691578803784,0.0,0.0,0.12012923291613953,0.0,0.04637802988683644,0.048255912925773685,0.0,0.0,0.039438120472751984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04055097097717185,0.0,0.0,0.10325446533704978,0.10843370503530016,0.0,0.0,0.044594045703918984,0.0,0.035352793955630686,0.0,0.04934888753239049,0.0,0.0,0.10258251117995454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04995696411785671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978958854852225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05935963516395655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172946655446414,0.04143114766360618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06358776907456762,0.3136438279737919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647975182865324,0.04864287689451239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17227045846432668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872353826002167,0.03887236447471826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0669176489090949,0.06208410983801285,0.0,0.0,0.060530993723467034,0.057550405411611036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031872156872119965,0.14181931260572245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16385238899548366,0.02833309115217652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048700615349116336,0.0,0.0,0.2465234483496224,0.0,0.05487561970587675,0.15484661281431794,0.17639138762701248,0.0,0.06317280674730999,0.0,0.0,0.0584446254999976,0.061522799647641416,0.05855772221064962,0.0,0.09258101214894958,0.0,0.08526498360393257,0.0,0.04472878820013169,0.056011267351277545,0.185032824367016,0.0,0.056822111829740826,0.16694131775746485,0.0,0.06085527413815416,0.061762048928774786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439581966374869,0.12560437551889406,0.0,0.16082381348500788,0.05063839578383012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05830030110966328,0.06496690140791984,0.0,0.05801000550058617,0.0,0.11145792276746412,0.0,0.057262386037722185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033174144114437,0.13835821247834407,0.0,0.11738667864359956,0.04621395764996917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06518803589830177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0446468542739604,0.0,0.0,0.08209734423106012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643228778503091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581125733151807,0.0,0.0,0.0436045047039391,0.1398408921928153,0.0,0.053393370170646465,0.0,0.0,0.26970190488775064,0.07432082609579231,0.05697911651329906,0.046041005237083724,0.13526779745893874,0.0,0.0,0.16624814954963293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037412346359625,0.13952003196513246,0.0,0.0,0.04785138057406715,0.1710327372706126,0.0460331849892494,0.13955861536561906,0.0,0.0,0.05376130770304053,0.052330845615095836,0.06474857760002332,0.0,0.05590444667347083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059101157925831226,0.08239498978409421,0.0,0.0,0.1867321756694973
mentalhealth,Soniarya,2020/04/07,"Am I a bad person because of an attraction? So, I'm a pedophile. I'm sexually attracted to kids, but I'd never, ever do anything sexual to a kid. My attraction feels like something I can't control, no matter how hard I try. I can control if I act upon my attraction, which I absolutely will not ever, but I can't control being attracted. I've tried so, so hard to get rid of it, but I can't seem to. I see people that say pedos should die, that they don't deserve to live. If anyone in my life knew about this, they'd probably hate me and leave me. People just seem to hate everything about pedophiles, and I've been feeling really horrible lately because people would hate me for something out of my control.

A recent thing for me was reading this: https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/fqq4tl/you_are_allowed_to_erase_anything_from_existence/flrs5mi?utm_medium=android_app&utm_source=share

People say pedophiles should vanish and be forgotten by everyone. I don't know anymore, does this make me a terrible person? Is there any way I can get rid of this?",7.891433946488291,9.87830403804348,7.11695652173913,69.24710702341137,62.96739130434783,9.13979933110368,30.45819397993311,9.466822959209583,2.889620903010034,869,30,135,16,13,268,102,184,0.204,0.682,0.114,-0.9642,1,0,2,0,0,0,41.0,0,0,2,4,10,11,3,0,6,0,19,1,0,6,3,30,34,12,1,5,7,0,4,1,0,4,1,2,0,4,9,4,0,4,6,1,0,1,8,5,0,0,3,7,22,6,18,24,0,10,0,0,1,0,8,3,0,4,6,92,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163214799684355,0.0,0.0763396986398907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11133036806005067,0.0784938244227702,0.0,0.09237926411295534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937312433406998,0.13686360324983676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5036302692147938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650670517498772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823825880953373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20308866425437788,0.0,0.10726790462227168,0.10089079269507437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352264398516695,0.0801975674558257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173009721282695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20112331450069867,0.3324963845058013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061694391655961626,0.0,0.12663259231235227,0.118865650294845,0.0,0.0,0.07929157023331979,0.054843882369802484,0.0,0.0991264019381996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07493348830999708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08658075412302434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31130391885804765,0.19603976190579112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103375937744615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228898043132664,0.0,0.07191573476881001,0.0,0.11084182616007313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785450915398508,0.0,0.0,0.08945557135241282,0.20439202962505107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17284431203297754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07457962678506293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243244335721734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910565278945255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974528976222924,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,paus_rokoko,2020/04/07,Peace in the time of Covid What is your technique to lower anxiety? I was coming out if losing my mother and this whole Covid thing broke the defenses I had built. I hace a wonderful partner but I feel it getting away from me all the time.,1.115624999999998,3.652699312500001,2.5258333333333347,91.2025,87.125,5.7,20.5,7.1686216300943375,0.7044749999999995,189,6,38,3,6,61,41,48,0.13699999999999998,0.741,0.122,0.0772,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,9,7,3,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,1,7,0,6,5,2,6,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,2,2,29,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26691835849953405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3278163156837802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3005586326089384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642147051435292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822932348046474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3903456686433241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318030476730545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4069092763960545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3895501716422488,0.0,0.0,0.3783824960736109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sammi_Seee,2020/04/07,"How do you know if the meds are working? I’ve been on meds 3 times in my life and every single time, I haven’t been able to notice a notable difference. I get frustrated so I ghost my psychiatrist and take myself off them. I’ve been on 2 SSRIs and one SNRI. I feel hopeless, but I sometimes doubt myself that the meds weren’t working. So how did you know that your meds were working/not working?",2.4397883597883587,4.217994777777779,3.636437389770727,89.60111111111117,76.53086419753086,6.110052910052911,23.917107583774253,6.868970318607317,0.7535700176366844,311,10,65,3,7,101,53,81,0.133,0.867,0.0,-0.8319,1,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,3,1,3,4,3,1,1,3,0,9,1,0,2,0,11,14,9,1,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,6,1,13,0,5,8,1,6,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,2,2,43,15,3,0.17097847538447294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786361158633265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14405673975259425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645185448275958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08932919651205813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18793059719576186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1207671535982926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7596741672559666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19466012746292707,0.0,0.0,0.1158594398782415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16910208406353894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285545349553185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19939784793832535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37342309927113004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigBlackCrucifix,2020/04/07,"Stalled I've given up I'm just done my life is at a roadblock with no foreseeable end. I don't want to do anything because I'm depressed and I'm depressed because I don't do anything. I just sit with a blank mind hoping I'll die peacefully somehow. Wake up sit cry sleep repeat, I don't seem suicidal right now but just defeated like I've reached the end and there's nothing more to do but wait. But I don't know what I'm waiting for or how long it will be.",1.2699555555555548,2.9389984400000024,3.0213333333333345,93.19122222222224,79.6,6.044444444444442,27.11111111111111,6.937597516519254,1.1178777777777782,364,16,83,4,9,121,62,100,0.177,0.706,0.11699999999999999,-0.5881,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,3,0,11,3,2,1,0,20,22,7,2,2,7,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,6,2,8,18,1,11,0,3,0,0,0,4,0,4,6,45,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34708923835072714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571133482500861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23165292010279884,0.0,0.0,0.36327874331907656,0.0,0.21887067379370967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21581383639344087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3735721434316519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094614970824865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589970766705933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895794518488994,0.10303027168876326,0.0,0.0,0.18663114075733497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21293892701061293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20235478051972075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1800990303474685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919864662506259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21104244593634547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306795882394843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243884706685837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RarityWebkinz,2020/04/07,"Anyone else feeling like they’re at a different age developmentally? I feel like I’m mentally stuck at 14. I’m not sure how true this actually is, because it’s mainly just how I feel. And thinking back to all the bad things that happened around this age, it wouldn’t be unusual for a person to just break down mentally and stop development. I can’t be picky with the type of therapist I have, there aren’t many, and I’m afraid with ending up with one that cares even less than my current one does. My psychiatrist is a godsend though. I see my therapist once a month, she’s working on getting me therapy that is twice a week, but the wait is long, and so far I’ve been waiting for two months. I feel like I’m hanging from a thin strand.. and the only thing that’s really keeping that thread hanging is the love of my life, music, and dancing. Even then.. everyday is a struggle to try and keep my emotions in check. Without the love of my life with me I feel like I’m dying. I feel like I’m drowning. I have no real hobbies, and it’s so hard to stick with one. I’m directionless.. no job.. not going to school. No social life. I’m tired of crying.. I just want to know how to get better. All of this would be so much easier if life came with an instruction manual. But of course it doesn’t.. and hardly anyone knows what they’re doing. I feel like a lost kid in a forest. Wandering, sometimes going in circles, not in complete isolation, yet I feel so so alone.",2.58878787878788,4.277809265993271,4.1408430976430965,86.53437575757576,75.86868686868685,7.310922558922559,24.33791245791246,8.109356740369918,1.3225817912457916,1140,37,240,19,25,380,157,297,0.107,0.7440000000000001,0.15,0.9447,4,2,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,0,3,18,16,0,2,16,0,18,7,0,3,4,54,54,22,2,4,10,0,11,6,0,2,5,0,0,2,15,17,0,5,11,1,1,6,11,4,0,5,4,12,21,12,34,45,5,32,0,1,1,2,6,12,0,1,19,150,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.08659305823172787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190322789764964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409186462674247,0.09092001703148124,0.0,0.0789934175800929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682321304434943,0.0740904449838239,0.054092343734369504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784793482354613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148978487770643,0.09047176711204363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303749474800747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747179185020652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09209345061857123,0.09270972233343397,0.0,0.0,0.0776530434273451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412713293191135,0.09981550611019724,0.07859332442139487,0.0,0.0,0.117217935919555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3589387234746754,0.3803559996206061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272128387786864,0.0,0.10086087132930964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846851909458152,0.0,0.15897917638640674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805630229633846,0.15774439819375655,0.0,0.0,0.09753343213813348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2507060618282385,0.2601101300651213,0.0,0.0,0.07852813466194578,0.0,0.0,0.09686529216626194,0.0,0.16017452581846814,0.0,0.0,0.08996388030205549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788490480237614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416556761743353,0.0,0.06523081043322619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450042292519092,0.18038843571314087,0.06748735449364758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748042529067828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010004378986534,0.05684624038318031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08980507423253077,0.07071071343512803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045467847389717,0.0,0.0,0.0877616890838043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418686029247548,0.0,0.09276562237126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363216873158774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10147678990856984,0.20605753451796696,0.11790386083214352,0.056858132299831936,0.08718218876805822,0.0,0.0,0.10198841607561454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602455870411131,0.0,0.08668170021977785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052338503292742325,0.0,0.07117827427278799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553786582006419,0.0,0.06460050865414835,0.0,0.0,0.06303516088409787,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AmRastas,2020/04/07,"CPTSD & Seroquel (apo-quetiapine) I would like others to share their similar experiences please  
I have fallen into a crisis with my mental health, I am adverse to most psychiatric medications and have been given 25mg Seroquel to take at night to help with experiences of overwhelm and distress also advised to use a half tablet when necessary during the day.   
did it help/not help, were the side effects harsh etc etc  


thanks community",6.701601731601733,9.002097623376628,6.731883116883117,69.65591991341992,66.27272727272728,9.28917748917749,32.31385281385281,9.725611199111238,3.5144995670995662,355,15,54,8,6,113,61,77,0.191,0.638,0.171,-0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,2,6,0,2,4,0,7,2,0,2,0,9,11,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,4,0,5,3,10,6,3,7,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,4,36,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16594399032250962,0.0,0.2248347197878195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13382542691511484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4628523149540227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40596508197127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205711910868812,0.0,0.0,0.4172645079973488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137787688342614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20904237536780973,0.20911915387606952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19473210443697814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22778135753934636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560201139260138,0.0,0.0,0.1910453920639429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17922019789629082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14740765639158626,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,just_hanging_around8,2020/04/07,"Took up cutting, need alternatives I don't want to explain my situation. I just need alternatives to cutting. Sorry if this triggers anyone, it's not my intention. I just need a little help right now",3.562567567567569,6.426953837837843,5.558040540540541,71.68949324324326,78.18918918918921,8.024324324324324,30.871621621621625,8.841846274778883,3.26997837837838,160,8,26,4,4,55,28,37,0.163,0.7659999999999999,0.071,-0.0297,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,11,7,1,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,3,6,0,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,1,17,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20425296236033572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957979157239314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.292775057357616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6497966847903889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494638351164566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.328348474076629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32699780584722704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245495001025855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722964575510938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TrailerTrash4,2020/04/07,"What to Expect with a Therapist Hello fellow Redditors. I am planning on moving a few states away after the lockdowns end (was on final steps of transfer) and am considering seeing a therapist.

I was depressed for most of my childhood, a lot due to parenting but it took a lot of different forms. After college, I reluctantly moved back home to pay off debt so I can breathe easily when I move away for good. I have been putting a lot of work into my mental health the past few years and feel like I made a lot of progress and am a lot more in control, but I want to make sure that I am still moving in the right direction and doing the right things to give myself the best chance of this working out for me.

Aside from the movies, I don't know much about therapy, what are your experiences with it, does it actually work, and how should I approach it?",9.381964285714286,6.450797553571429,9.081904761904765,72.6964285714286,61.55952380952381,12.457142857142856,37.69047619047619,10.608840637214634,3.687383333333333,671,23,134,12,7,218,107,168,0.05,0.7929999999999999,0.157,0.9657,3,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,7,6,5,0,0,14,0,13,2,1,4,1,27,21,10,0,3,2,1,1,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,9,9,0,1,2,0,2,8,1,1,0,0,5,2,16,4,29,15,12,31,0,1,1,0,5,11,0,6,12,105,25,6,0.0,0.0,0.10963773861660243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21111371156447212,0.08639048713118164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790476489138535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12601047517851874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676719513569823,0.0,0.0,0.1173822072112304,0.0,0.0,0.09831855176298072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950906615243574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990020440033466,0.0,0.0,0.05680771465303541,0.08026311523352782,0.0,0.12307432099221655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10777669688060387,0.0,0.09423414637640116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942317239485653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269656539164785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061744816256083836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054888707851720966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4775812657498115,0.0,0.10630862132339657,0.07499473360446182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322273158769612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4776425834401518,0.08259043727141142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247517721737921,0.0,0.10725112544989836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294313698736146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19189317661866465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952868596288345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08972313770724713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588887888444827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284824210489795,0.2608948404271136,0.07464058285832921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482537702431153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626714959342264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453771870501271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234994432333178
mentalhealth,pip_lup_pip934,2020/04/07,"I’ve officially had the worst birthday of my life Today was my birthday, not a special one but something we always valued highly in my family. 

Not only are we currently in “shelter-in-place” status in my state, but I’ve been ill for the last week with COVID symptoms and was tested yesterday so I am on strict quarantine at least until my test comes back negative and I’m symptom free for at least 3 days. 

I had so many people wishing me a happy birthday and every time I just wanted to cry. Everything about my day was awful. I felt awful physically and mentally. 

My husband spent all morning on the phone with work trying to figure out if they still want him to come in and if so what protocols he needs to take and then got supplies we may need for a 14 day quarantine just in case. 

I spent all day not only feeling physically ill, but guilty and worried about this whole ordeal especially pertaining to how it’s affecting my husband and work. I feel like no matter how the test comes back I am going to feel even worse: if it’s negative that I’ll look like I was faking it to get attention wasting everyone’s time and if it’s positive then my husband and I have to quarantine for 14 days and it’s even more chaos because of me. 

No one else can adequately do my job at work (a new promotion I just got at the beginning of this year) and I had a lot of big projects I was supposed to do this week. I feel like everyone is mad at me and I’m letting everyone down. Everyone at work already judges me because according to them I’m “sick all the time” (I have had bad health the past year or so but almost always have brought in a doctors note and have never played hooky.) 

Anyway, the only thing I was looking forward to all day was playing Animal Crossing with my husband and having a nice dinner with him even if it has to be 6 feet apart (he was going to make steaks on the grill.) However, he got really tired and his stomach was upset so he slept while I ate leftovers and played by myself and tried not to cry. 

I just long for normal life back where I can hug and kiss my husband, see my family and friends, go to work, be productive at home, and go out eating/shopping/etc (especially on special occasions.) I know I’m not alone in this so I try not to get too upset but it’s difficult because I am someone who thrives in routine and don’t know what the future holds for me right now. 

Thanks for reading my rambling I just really needed to let this all out. Any kind words or advice are appreciated. 

TL;DR A birthday with no physical contact, limited interactions, and the small plans I did have cancelled really made me feel more down than I already did due to everything going on with the pandemic, especially since I am awaiting test results on the virus myself since I’ve been ill the past week.",5.0587096774193565,5.683294817204303,6.103745519713261,78.90895161290327,68.56989247311829,9.354121863799284,30.912186379928322,9.444778638647367,2.7214745519713257,2220,86,430,44,36,740,255,558,0.182,0.7140000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.9941,3,4,1,0,0,0,44.0,3,0,2,8,26,23,1,2,22,2,41,18,3,6,6,97,85,47,0,12,23,5,6,3,1,1,11,0,1,0,17,38,2,2,10,4,3,11,13,7,0,2,27,9,55,17,66,53,12,79,0,0,3,2,22,33,0,10,39,289,72,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06963665032496695,0.0,0.0,0.07135885405597275,0.07380620407558726,0.15727933974609795,0.0,0.1185918088643657,0.0,0.0,0.04846077673702455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16438882482886402,0.05950100586909882,0.13032242670622646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841583667442507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565564806694562,0.2757495525838529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293993710626241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05953046944992835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794762510776624,0.1412041409921856,0.0,0.06004152291993273,0.2723765521511781,0.12809183862988394,0.0,0.13435942270153728,0.0,0.18016168529538795,0.10181953768673664,0.06842293971998288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05505704104189183,0.0,0.0744631734552541,0.0,0.20249990731726394,0.0,0.1709848045288637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585999501613502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574844414491641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07529248443328104,0.07148185161811044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707167916306819,0.0,0.0,0.07420867191555662,0.07832774279262959,0.058088248652151786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14574096675392334,0.10066927563680812,0.1044454138384233,0.0,0.0,0.06306485272736535,0.11968469182094127,0.0,0.0,0.060584620401301865,0.0,0.06743006824348269,0.04756810822959789,0.07224874099525533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181559146032904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15852017622092365,0.054961843837914165,0.06882552944538553,0.0,0.0,0.06982187898659672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657829584213858,0.16259446720936252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605577079730882,0.04940427450566843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07128153906370241,0.0,0.13695727499332574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608575759603399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05678679046981437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178977466285767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603802769708733,0.05486116506175092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05691012848538905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813753648085146,0.05358034667615784,0.0,0.0,0.06560870954448023,0.0,0.0,0.04734347537590339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12466078099923082,0.08190547843004782,0.06754828477561985,0.0,0.0,0.14514717905540506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08406464807388397,0.0,0.1714868462262096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956176221132391,0.08194807575891441,0.0,0.0,0.25939884997427554,0.07237027858225459,0.07262232542552706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09178111092784444
mentalhealth,K4R33M3,2020/04/07,"Need advice! My sister who is 22F is struggling with extreme anxiety depression. She is staying at parents house at the moment due to the lockdown. Staying at my parents house, has made her mental health worsen, her decisions are starting to become erratic. She has also started to secluded herself into her room more often and I'm really worried. My sister has insisted on going back to her college town, but my parents won't budge on their stance of keeping her home. How do I help ease her anxiety? Any help is greatly appreciated! By the way we live in the US.",4.005714285714287,6.5807212380952445,5.474523809523814,74.51464285714287,74.71428571428572,7.628571428571428,32.404761904761905,8.548686976883017,3.200219047619049,450,23,70,9,10,151,74,105,0.09699999999999999,0.7709999999999999,0.133,0.851,3,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,2,0,1,0,4,3,0,1,4,0,10,1,0,2,0,11,17,4,0,1,1,5,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,17,1,14,15,1,18,0,1,0,0,20,9,0,1,5,53,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725859814723047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051170946109845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247859444872774,0.0,0.230564385477042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587608815377845,0.0,0.0,0.16643213093147818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979442999217505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08564413232780965,0.0,0.0,0.16614311010431593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16018303069662293,0.0,0.0,0.20201699404108603,0.0,0.15116059162996906,0.0,0.0,0.3477664007216296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394572082137948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13306751957857715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259240322688593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518663415631098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117393346722374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5019909423985451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653985474346774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21332711457649586,0.3212442308954401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15754040458159488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18126899306860705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961564190047645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303932227949832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,murumurutuff,2020/04/07,"Need help understanding if I have intrusive thoughts or something else. I struggle a lot with negative thinking to the point where it upsets me and lowers my self esteem. I'm not hearing voices or hallucinating. I'll be doing something and automatically have ""someone"" in my head make fun of me or criticize my actions. The ""person"" in my head isn't myself but usually a friend or coworker I knew. They are usually people who have bullied me, made fun of me (not teasing or in a friendly way), or criticized me when it was uncalled for. 

For example, I've thought of visiting church but then one my friends in my mind would tell me I do not belong in church because I am not actively religious and am a poser. It makes me feel guilty and that I don't belong there. 

I've looked up intrusive thoughts but to my understanding, these are thoughts that compel you to do something bad.",5.875220468154597,6.861206592814372,6.653064779531848,74.40389765922701,66.90419161676647,9.90506260206859,35.54109961894393,10.018931242160765,3.690705389221556,699,34,126,16,11,231,98,167,0.162,0.723,0.114,-0.7044,1,0,3,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,1,0,3,9,1,2,6,0,15,2,2,4,0,36,31,16,0,3,14,0,1,0,3,1,0,2,0,2,7,5,0,0,9,0,0,2,7,4,0,1,7,4,23,5,15,22,1,15,2,0,1,0,13,8,0,8,4,91,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164489810845674,0.0850176876885915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11650664404196764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07051862191802696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.323255190591114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862664162939421,0.0,0.1571892583666738,0.0,0.0934816791786362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711701516971472,0.0,0.0,0.11856971511788912,0.0,0.13196689075628446,0.18619038971016286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082174509059942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034128904357417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450633633356492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09668874237292774,0.12177706020078985,0.0,0.0,0.13184123805285927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454943247333014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11816979609270352,0.3221051482696516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14580101667856726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190016040433645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936471597832259,0.0,0.442884351265454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903797860809794,0.0,0.0,0.3072060284520069,0.0,0.0,0.1107022813992848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907323756872556,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coelho-cinico,2020/04/07,"Has anyone else experience a relapse during the pandemic? In the past couple years, I have drastically recovered from a severe eating disorder persistent for 4 years. I have managed it relatively well until this pandemic. The stress it has caused has deteriorated my mental health. I’ve spent the past few weeks having issues with my relationship with food barely noticeable but a cause for worry. I was hesitant to eat and overeating or under eating but it hadn’t spiraled out of control...until 3 days ago. The only things I’ve eaten since is one egg with hot peppers, one cup of soup, and a lot of low-zero calorie coffee, tea, soda, and flavored drinks. I can’t seem to force myself to eat. I feel like it’s all I have to control. What should I do?",4.859615877080664,6.668849647887328,6.230460947503206,73.38579385403331,70.12676056338027,8.543918053777206,27.697823303457106,9.095868883498916,2.510864788732394,598,21,101,12,11,202,98,142,0.09300000000000001,0.871,0.036000000000000004,-0.755,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,9,0,13,11,0,3,1,18,17,7,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,7,7,10,1,2,1,1,0,2,1,1,2,4,3,10,2,18,12,3,12,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,3,9,69,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168832260440828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921974418451338,0.13510302239446031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2709068085830515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957775519210795,0.0,0.14589720180114754,0.0,0.08503682134077861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511194826420254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291696077410771,0.0,0.5396902918654694,0.11014955812282257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898139367820824,0.0,0.0,0.0666708333037474,0.0941986279303364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15944194141425252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14015776673946398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13762439318134256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441864302746851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210005948055517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13288078758286884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501200059456812,0.0,0.0,0.17869935697743095,0.10028314845498892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25174474805694025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415650129601994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003761062442225,0.0,0.14896081638307548,0.0,0.10907342756415844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15104168512136446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759989532823623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576768787610123,0.0,0.1185552290332376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390712824406434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16982309909763346
mentalhealth,TheJionTV,2020/04/07,"Engineering Student w/Dysthymic Disorder; Struggling with Motivation I have asthma and seasonal allergies. There is a perpetual green haze in North Texas this time of year. I moved back home with my parents as a Junior Engineering Student to do 16 credit hours of Electrical Engineering online. Living with friends and having the pressure of in-person classes, I procrastinated a lot, but was able to get things done. Now that I am home, and can't go outside. I'm having major issues keeping myself on track. I am a week behind in 2 classes and am normally an A/B student. 

Any advice for a dysthymic guy to make himself interested in accomplishing anything to do with school again? (M, 21)",6.463969534050182,8.27397086290323,7.483333333333337,65.95055555555557,66.17741935483872,9.704659498207887,36.358422939068106,9.994966539143718,4.1708218637992855,553,28,84,13,9,186,89,124,0.046,0.875,0.079,0.5789,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,2,7,0,12,1,0,2,0,14,17,6,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,1,3,8,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,2,0,0,2,1,8,3,18,15,2,15,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,1,8,58,11,11,0.19966691187648813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19511219542770694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578034694616534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16430885575089396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15353153053007948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22883557934045995,0.0,0.0,0.2043285737207739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15426216082058486,0.0,0.10431772050758588,0.0,0.11347530734519805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19770163434489035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4005643849140365,0.0,0.19663168836176867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20840038090676774,0.0,0.17747312541626006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763095412543411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697496683210525,0.0,0.0,0.13327921411653604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21221432855955888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19563118033950366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217064766529012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17434144593873704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020735745266838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20873520862769573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13264982414667112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164273819939517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601607529848554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857894491160776
mentalhealth,LVRKTHASICKFUCK666,2020/04/07,"Just cause ur black dont mean u cant have mental illness It isn't white people shit. It's not just how it is.
Me being black I hate this culture we have with mental illness. It's hardly excepted. I hate it.",-1.259714285714285,0.7641938222222251,1.3393650793650806,96.91,99.66666666666666,3.4603174603174613,15.317460317460318,5.288315135182226,-0.8332539682539681,162,4,36,1,7,55,31,45,0.158,0.6829999999999999,0.159,-0.2406,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,3,3,3,0,0,0,7,3,1,2,0,9,10,1,0,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,9,0,0,0,0,3,0,3,0,1,0,0,23,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2754026770726007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31419993776125016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401563290681092,0.5293675098753367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920290256047357,0.0,0.0,0.5403441105559158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18586011910917846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751909304203057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Colourmeinsane,2020/04/07,"Telling my therapist about sexual assault Tomorrow I’m telling my therapist about the time my ex abusive  boyfriend d coerced me intohaving sex.  I’m feeling so anxious and my ptsd is bad toniught because I know I have to speak about it tomorrow. 
I’m just praying I won’t be dissociated all day afterwards.   My heart races everytime I think about it. And it’s phone therapy and I’m quarantined alone.  So it’s just a disaster waiting to happen because I’ll be all alone after the call.  
I’m going to try do some art or call a friend if I feel up to it but otherwise I’ll probably just sleep the dissociation off.",4.365775941230488,5.80945608264463,6.2318457300275485,74.32938475665749,70.81818181818181,10.667033976124886,35.758494031221296,10.746095033038511,4.312415243342516,490,27,93,16,9,170,74,121,0.145,0.81,0.045,-0.8552,0,3,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,9,3,1,0,5,0,6,3,2,0,2,17,18,8,0,1,6,1,2,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,4,1,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,3,11,1,11,15,3,9,1,0,0,1,8,2,0,3,6,52,16,0,0.0,0.20729389438804136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3624026806428624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19765014074894727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14608070078922109,0.2133027405024584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35729865986771875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283195215327513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1769257165246372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517033907753462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943135561686686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547127468559744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073233457345092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615107670244913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18863183458203436,0.0,0.2045138496683616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17508204994778725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3058379848811553,0.0,0.20007708938609972,0.40627410257632623,0.0,0.1121045475396876,0.0,0.0,0.10201807506337013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11878343525059501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pass_the_aggression,2020/04/07,"Do I have any recourse to be psychologically evaluated/diagnosed during the quarantine? Hi everyone, 22 year old college student here! I've long suspected that I've had something bigger going on, because I've had mood and anxiety problems for as long as I can remember (although I've never been diagnosed). This last week I had a really bad episode where I didn't feel in control of my thoughts, emotions, and actions. I've had episodes like that occasionally, but this one served as a wake up call. Given that coronavirus doesn't have a reliable end date, I wanted to be proactive and look into possible ways to address this in the near future.",9.06817927170868,8.400866924369751,9.299621848739497,63.71425070028013,60.42857142857143,12.639215686274511,43.362745098039206,11.855464076750405,5.433654341736696,520,28,85,14,6,173,84,119,0.067,0.884,0.05,0.1768,0,1,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,5,0,13,2,1,1,1,13,19,8,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,6,4,0,1,4,0,0,2,3,2,0,1,8,2,6,1,14,9,0,21,0,0,1,0,2,8,0,0,11,53,12,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330729478133775,0.0,0.14969898153492273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338933838864042,0.11928815188759047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19981692080998714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21947808848644373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39723361766602056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22012001018259647,0.17331939741729335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869860181291168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894454096509114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121266068381463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950991713165236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560212086907696,0.0,0.0,0.34635127296402896,0.1643266557114431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15092483177600066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20533916481010944,0.0,0.13260165630699444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22060616055025825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18724473274670764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12536123393667428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22167368726042536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506483685736259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15535254250828032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542046247825745,0.15532615526113286,0.1569672195060393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12601513850090176
mentalhealth,vespertinesoul,2020/04/07,"Scared of schizophrenia relapse. Hi all...I'm 18, almost 19, and I've been suffering with schizoaffective disorder since I was 12. The journey to recovery has been a long and arduous one, but after a 7 month long hospitalization in 2018 into 2019, I finally got on the proper medication and went into partial remission for the first time since the onset of my symptoms. Since 2013, the early months of 2019 up until the present has been the only time I have been without prominent delusions, and without hallucinations that dreadfully impact me. Yes. 6 whole years, while I was a teenager. It was hell.

And this past year has been, in contrast, heaven. I am more much functional, and I very much enjoy sanity. However, in light of the COVID-19 crisis, I'm thinking that all this self-isolation is getting to me. These past 1-2 weeks, I've been noticing my ability to keep my thinking clear and organized has suffered... And I'm writing this while trying to ignore the thoughts in my head that I cannot control telling me there are people out to get me.

I don't know what to do. I just started at a new clinic, and I have an appointment on april 10th. I'm just scared. I don't know what's going on, I know I've experienced some set backs over the past year but those were because I wasn't taking my meds. I'm on my meds. I'm taking them nightly. But still, something feels wrong, and I'm scared. I don't want to lose myself again.",3.754807722492544,5.665205519855598,4.655692983832996,83.13433526918853,73.22382671480146,7.705477946947105,27.9279547951656,8.456263369488248,2.057911442473709,1127,44,215,20,23,365,158,277,0.134,0.775,0.091,-0.8786,1,1,1,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,1,3,6,12,1,4,15,1,25,4,1,1,2,37,48,16,0,1,7,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,11,14,0,3,7,0,0,3,7,10,0,2,14,3,26,2,31,34,6,46,2,3,0,0,4,14,1,2,28,137,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120760799782158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08606292483617672,0.0,0.06822805154646244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255326878455054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282750142373036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0565923198103431,0.0,0.0,0.12260766652157833,0.0,0.09520280418567227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695171810153655,0.0,0.06360919358449632,0.0,0.08951613587855138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486668443903746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09948351456151568,0.0,0.0,0.18453210498981715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19809907464440285,0.0,0.12521473067898511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486454667874085,0.1127520185439449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178673914063195,0.0,0.16455456685371345,0.0,0.0,0.10809724518016467,0.0,0.10503343071923696,0.0,0.0,0.12742662668851146,0.0,0.0,0.07584284355570678,0.08512351995207257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205334008884774,0.07759425924104467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33616743180249464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11676151819115525,0.0,0.0,0.27775496373648273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616484113290286,0.0,0.0,0.07922063870049949,0.0,0.0893829391752282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163322660239253,0.16830638044235713,0.0,0.09782682467268708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14343322228515865,0.0,0.08885544046417237,0.1305279897988797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598929412770554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234931939111576,0.066015887905648,0.0,0.08977897112242082,0.0,0.0,0.10375500385547508,0.0,0.1249595518701827,0.0,0.215782179711232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237171843883728,0.0,0.2162268564620596
mentalhealth,whatisasimplusername,2020/04/07,"Seeking to understand a loved one I hope it's okay for me to post here. A very close loved one was e periencing a psychosis 2 weeks ago. The covid19 worry started it and other life stressors added until my mother said ""He can't hear you. He's talking out of his head."" That was 2 weeks ago. He went to the ER the day before with a blood pressure of 240/180 after his dog came back from the vet (that was one of the stressors). He has been in a facility since. Im missing him terribly and want to help more, but delusions and paranoia that accompanied his psychosis are beyond my understanding. The doctor put him on risperdal then seroquel. When he refused his medications, he was given a shot of geodon and ativan. He refused again and was given invega sustenna. He was on suboxone for 8 years, but the doctor didn't order it- we even brought it with us when he was given a bed. I've learned how super under-served mental health is. I've googled and worried and called people. He sounds a lot better since the second shot, but I'm scared. Will he get better? What can help? Just listening?  What are some things to keep in mind to keep him recovered? What else could have been triggers? My mother had a chemical imbalance 30 years ago and that's what they dxed him with. Could it be something else? 

I appreciate any responses. I'm just trying to understand.",2.656454020560485,5.150616391634983,3.5533755809040986,86.93598084776795,79.0,6.329756372341922,24.569638079143786,7.526774132740827,1.2928533727644005,1073,39,206,16,27,342,154,263,0.08900000000000001,0.792,0.11900000000000001,0.8796,0,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,2,1,1,3,10,11,0,2,17,1,22,9,2,2,0,37,45,16,0,4,5,2,0,0,0,1,5,4,1,0,15,15,0,4,4,0,0,4,2,4,1,4,18,4,18,7,25,23,3,29,0,1,0,2,36,7,0,3,16,125,33,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004273114705315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768245083166771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868681264215415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961304437231044,0.0,0.0,0.19982825978573102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11535655403161126,0.12920932419884967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18039713406785948,0.0,0.0,0.07285728521836764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312622777487085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887464194051016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07461662423661668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05902295705496548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159413729485433,0.12008344415867454,0.12732711481658446,0.0,0.1514448585317438,0.0,0.0,0.11220621095343083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122028628814473,0.0,0.0,0.2008285573895892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979512632826899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09604434735208324,0.2039224170177704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380692231647505,0.11384872209850355,0.0,0.11406903176549385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296572793002585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832022830002128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819548901532253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356758166400442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746178679831997,0.0,0.1131042006772422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18690241936350566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869709962434221,0.0,0.0,0.0799618241063717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908022293870134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505325879305758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670024719162764,0.0,0.0,0.3528220129059426,0.13589083008473848,0.0,0.0,0.09321333625462147,0.06663353014476632,0.0,0.1812378798025716,0.0,0.0,0.10472573188677292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294561269206773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14549991136239834
mentalhealth,Donttrytohateme,2020/04/07,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me I feel like I’m in an eternal conflict with myself and it’s consuming me slowly. I try to always think rationally as to not make any choices that will hurt anyone. I don’t ever want to hurt anyone again but the urges nearly take hold of me and I try my best to hide it from my family and I’m afraid to tell them. It’s usually the smallest things that get me going or even nothing at all but I feel an intense desire to hurt whether it be myself or others but I never do that’s why I don’t think anyone knows but it’s best to keep it that way, when I was younger I hurt many animals and I regret it to this day I try to tell myself that I didn’t know what I was doing but I was fully aware, I was around 5 or 6 I’m not sure but I haven’t done that to anything after that. Sometimes I break down in tears because I don’t want to and want the best for everyone even my worst enemy I keep in my prayer but idk, I feel like I should disappear because I randomly feel these intense emotions that don’t make sense but I plan to help myself but idk how. I’ve never had therapy and I feel like I can handle this myself. I’m only a teen.",0.04334486237209845,1.95626818677043,2.4934284479031557,94.13946245856756,85.03112840466926,5.363827640870444,18.07882980256521,6.605766666666668,-0.11774494883989073,912,22,212,10,27,313,121,257,0.16399999999999998,0.687,0.149,-0.4754,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,4,7,15,0,1,6,0,19,0,0,3,5,53,43,22,0,6,15,0,5,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,22,9,0,4,10,0,0,2,11,8,0,0,7,5,40,7,26,33,5,20,0,5,0,0,4,7,0,4,12,147,62,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874135455992704,0.0,0.0,0.0714404874610328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22036910726733727,0.0,0.08645069049398166,0.09352054874551703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280801824744501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33074383896779513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06775129558437784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750696427824907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11817188305940082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13877467295168958,0.09502757693990524,0.0,0.10038383084648804,0.0,0.0,0.09903579037608852,0.0,0.2655929080367019,0.22515231580595027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054886505827242506,0.0,0.059704747070249066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041564439551559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4498509581333955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18675407562476687,0.0,0.0,0.17320519305314686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15397258938248706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14024904544814326,0.10650851312507988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16204861663052386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008023791449904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07989848545582746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10390133220440896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0990123804255661,0.0,0.07898771630606903,0.0,0.1836440770471255,0.0,0.12013868203082545,0.0,0.06979337077711083,0.13462903356305794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2139748044399302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157024063201619,0.0,0.18589114251805067,0.0833871679378841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479511384355846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486032263932472,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowRA_to_Z,2020/04/07,"How do I start? I know I need counseling or therapy. I've suffered from self injurious behaviors for over 15 years, and have a family history of mental/psychiatric/personality disorders. 

But how do I go about finding someone to talk to? How do I know if I want a social worker, psychiatrist, psychologist, counselor. I just feel so overwhelmed and keep shutting down every time I start looking. 

My thoughts and moods are just getting too much for me to handle especially with this quarantine. 

I feel so lost and upset.",5.400241935483873,7.89209841935484,6.580309139784948,68.59046370967744,70.18279569892474,10.241397849462368,34.20564516129032,10.411451182825502,4.381603225806454,415,21,66,13,8,139,68,93,0.109,0.857,0.034,-0.8176,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,9,5,0,2,2,0,5,0,0,3,0,22,19,12,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,3,11,0,11,17,1,8,0,3,1,0,3,3,0,2,4,46,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521142800411336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853412716576361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20737603787879305,0.0,0.2224553557787568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20105625290178267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492962360618443,0.0,0.12501878202784664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19552689039846,0.0,0.0,0.24178872802106585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18472643515077566,0.0,0.2401323860837694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22168646627855326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16170941939268116,0.16311118048175952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920766353329196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22948542450219586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242402545701765,0.18638696642897332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.311403657354917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17681028817877434,0.0,0.0,0.25156444736718137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17463826087690265,0.1282711616483728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974894720977173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416588636184472
mentalhealth,ginx_minx,2020/04/07,"Dad's depression has killed my love for him. My dad has been suicidal and depressed since I was 18, so for about 5 years now. Living with him was what I can only call a mental hell. He'd ignore me for days and lay on the floor in the living room. He'd explain the ways he wanted to kill himself and why. I had a 11 year old brother (then) who was comforting  him because he would cry daily in his room and leave  the door open so we would see and hear him.

He has never, not once, spoken about how he regrets any of it. He has towards my mother but never towards us. I live on my own for 3 years now and he has never visited me and only contacted me via text about 10 times. When I come over there he barely looks at me. We used to have a really strong bond but I now feel nothing but hate for this man and it crushes me. I block it away but sometimes it all hits me. The funny dad I once had has been lost for years and I don't think he will ever come back. I feel like this is worse than him dying. My dad is gone but he who crushed my heart took his place.",1.7188596491228054,2.855457728070178,3.220175438596492,94.53622807017548,76.98245614035088,6.119298245614036,20.12280701754386,6.42735559955562,-0.0632298245614038,814,17,194,6,18,268,131,228,0.16399999999999998,0.754,0.08199999999999999,-0.9465,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,3,0,0,2,13,13,4,0,8,0,23,2,1,2,5,38,40,19,4,4,6,6,2,1,0,3,0,1,3,1,9,15,0,2,4,0,0,5,5,9,0,0,10,5,35,4,23,24,2,37,1,4,2,1,37,14,1,0,18,127,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813549395770052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123996903291586,0.0919908416082634,0.0,0.07292752244939713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221592651705394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20610747918714126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13141187453895328,0.07715376468472927,0.0,0.2060804613148424,0.0,0.12416077255607902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108215425941936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098066938410895,0.08546625636248173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11811339645026785,0.0,0.0,0.1348357439492907,0.14176637313446314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26471367116343875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667469180269206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844692625014074,0.0,0.3169159395641428,0.0,0.10046208012949613,0.0,0.1305941891464766,0.0,0.10797398042882222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056251462181344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768063856305108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479165044936415,0.0,0.12553532194497471,0.25481172523036777,0.0,0.1819734631597683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249916326412194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07664033734730036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533247749027847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896213700083832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183206736666048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1308597236545617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665637007871308,0.0,0.0,0.06975930493816097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329173137905669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439044715397556,0.10332500552388893,0.0,0.0,0.07056298748290503,0.09495957054862557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795070180819473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219168427488585,0.1699685313341504,0.0,0.0,0.3081604231960419
mentalhealth,Tacotuesdays20,2020/04/07,"Thinking my GrubHub is late because the guy at the restaurant... Recognizes my name and knows me from school and is purposely trying to mess with me and delay my order more and more.

I know because of Coronavirus everything is busy but I ordered three hours ago and it keeps changing times to 30 mins, 30 mins.. I'm just confused. I tried to contact GrubHub they told me my order should eventually get to me but now over 3 hours I'm thinking someone at the restaurant I ordered from must know me and hate me for some reason, trying to annoy me on purpose.

What is this? I even do this when I'm talking to someone over the phone. Could be some support person and I'll just assume they put me on hold extra long because they somehow know me and are trying to make my life worse on purpose.

I don't even know what this is..",3.1158457493426823,5.033070404907979,3.863597721297108,88.09970858895706,75.01226993865029,5.884136722173532,27.59377738825592,6.5431188927421005,1.2063482909728311,648,26,126,5,14,206,87,163,0.11599999999999999,0.863,0.021,-0.9418,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,3,0,7,5,2,1,4,0,12,1,0,2,1,34,28,11,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,6,9,0,3,9,0,0,1,1,4,0,1,1,0,23,1,19,23,5,23,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,5,11,87,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090235153272234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700585108923653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15621743543137828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790410603978775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950719765429461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327181056712125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715254483779904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14621853443577792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457955647400104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908544220300576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13125769236096976,0.0,0.0,0.4057834502234433,0.0,0.1665804908355216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043051275141371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306851065288282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857223195674517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894152747420312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845118532934254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183144965251658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945198613758606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502440769121061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675764785588544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11869319030609797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18924455823689695,0.0,0.0,0.08610875281714676,0.0,0.0,0.14110696051140492,0.0,0.4010384810108043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504904225438397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,diegangas,2020/04/07,"How can I focus on my responsibilities? In this time of confinement it has been very difficult for me to focus on virtual classes or on my health, I want to know if there is anything I can do",6.556153846153848,5.4474765384615385,8.353461538461541,69.90403846153849,65.66666666666667,11.902564102564106,34.884615384615394,11.20814326018867,3.766169230769232,151,6,31,4,2,54,31,39,0.073,0.893,0.034,-0.3597,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,0,6,8,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,0,8,7,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,1,26,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4412683164444916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5699831730954482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29469579132829865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3126776983852938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44244261601139423,0.31627999357080017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayuyhrbhdb,2020/04/07,Please help I’m low income and the sliding scale places will not do intake over the phone and I’m willing to pay online. Can someone please help me find a place where I can get medication I have ptsd. Even if I have to do it through another state of possible,3.5017924528301885,4.819954226415099,4.271839622641512,88.03530660377363,72.77358490566039,7.564150943396226,26.45754716981132,8.07648339933343,1.4339849056603768,206,7,44,3,4,66,40,53,0.064,0.752,0.183,0.7579,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,0,8,1,0,0,0,5,11,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,5,9,0,7,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,1,0,27,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24717213366905125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569030831134245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21544307815424307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12315355291596301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159952216841799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23746229482627704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4925527869201565,0.5174977923472934,0.0,0.2657379802527436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755431303286214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19972411300685064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Internet_Stranger467,2020/04/07,"I just want to end it I've been suicidal for over a year but with the current situation, those feelings are far stronger than before. I am too scared to reach out to someone I know, even though I know I should. I always prented to be hapoy and say I'm fine when inside I want to die so now I'm struggling alone. I plan to take my life in a day, I just can't cope anymore. The only reason I am still living is because I don't want to cause pain for my family and friends and I had some things I was really looking forward too, but now those things have be cancelled. All the work I have to do makes me feel so overwhelmed that I just keep pushing it away and I spend all day on social media to forget about reality and keep my mind occupied so I'm not having suicidal thoughts. Everyday, it just gets harder and I already know I'm destined to fail in the future since I'm useless and good at nothing so why stick around anymore? I know it's selfish of me to end it, knowing my family will be in pain but I can't deal with it anymore. I don't know what to do.",2.5413803921568645,3.627696973333333,4.098875816993466,89.24917647058822,74.82222222222222,6.894117647058824,26.12418300653595,7.285733465282438,1.1094967320261433,829,29,184,9,17,277,124,225,0.21100000000000002,0.703,0.086,-0.9894,2,1,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,0,3,19,11,0,3,6,0,21,3,0,3,2,42,44,16,3,4,8,0,2,0,1,2,3,1,0,0,12,11,0,2,10,0,1,2,5,8,0,0,4,4,26,3,28,35,3,24,0,3,1,0,4,11,0,1,13,123,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197201962806576,0.12756050565892255,0.0,0.09618320581816972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.343913623285786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290288680720573,0.0,0.0,0.10860407203470727,0.0,0.0,0.07046483738712224,0.0,0.09836171193624814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874655609423715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14909672781181085,0.11917201338604655,0.0,0.0,0.11996799499248455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20476338952006348,0.0,0.0,0.07634853865813765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21794287701763101,0.0,0.1168952805307718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930739417809662,0.0,0.06039292938445801,0.0,0.0,0.09695449855294112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20548995662005173,0.0,0.0,0.3811635969687904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164723812599352,0.0,0.0,0.10207134150333842,0.0,0.09706958226654401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715968224181716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671666965027833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091525819935066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791420618479104,0.2459996612975229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405227446495209,0.11884956013417106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919247377891861,0.1157294440233676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956202906260095,0.12993214496497,0.0,0.1178332046558693,0.0979421540637728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231326604536542,0.0,0.0,0.12084361749244545,0.0,0.2528814592389508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691206520099384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15359061573758453,0.0,0.11357020847094974,0.0917684738366776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20454045077354255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10430532113604042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415357929014322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443854316017348
mentalhealth,breadbradfry,2020/04/07,"How to stop self loathing? I’m 21 and I’ve hated myself for as long as I can remember.

I’ve been diagnosed with a few mental illnesses, I was trying to go to therapy more and get back on medication before covid. Not happening now. Being in isolation is becoming very difficult.

I’ve been lonely for so long, always shy and awkward but wanted friends. I’ve realized recently that its probably because of how internally negative I am, its impossible to hate yourself so much and still project positivity to others. People can see that.

I’ve known for a long time that I need to change my self image to keep living, its not an option anymore its a necessity. I cannot keep living like this. But I’m stuck in this rut of hating myself so much that I see nothing good and feel I deserve even less than that, how could I try to love someone who deserves nothing? 

I don’t know how to get out of this. I’ve been trying unsuccessfully to change my self image for years.",3.909365079365082,5.619285756613756,5.619238095238099,77.2174285714286,72.38624338624341,8.84952380952381,28.473015873015875,9.3871,2.659180317460317,764,30,143,18,15,261,109,189,0.212,0.718,0.07,-0.9733,0,3,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,11,10,3,1,4,0,12,4,0,4,0,27,31,16,0,3,4,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,3,14,7,0,3,5,0,0,1,5,6,0,0,5,3,13,4,25,24,5,15,0,1,2,1,6,4,0,1,11,94,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784012656264224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11661270850308085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041559492041737,0.0,0.07167871510963574,0.12986337709357434,0.1000561611863293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487786445783939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388204207106678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11934628402778832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766377322987754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0594545011492315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908458672700438,0.0,0.12286660242193467,0.0,0.06682625638505696,0.0986247061380989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398001338000408,0.0,0.0,0.3482724852197497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090298736877796,0.0,0.0,0.06462163231662887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05744608393387648,0.0,0.2076593909748588,0.31217703304737376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612503925086944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845450122145296,0.11849800799793515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17287698608049132,0.08718777602324962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256519276445784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08151862285697117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12677650085285933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610098654287952,0.0,0.1332008655093891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18740001758493635,0.0,0.3680003492035663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962937570965323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390352043748597,0.09830631207062963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344686773014628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856475000063547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394974577921037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701992663086327,0.06935467032465674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572087478242746
mentalhealth,greengreen87,2020/04/07,"I need counseling/therapy really bad right now and I don’t have a therapist. Basically I never go to therapy and I really should. I have extremely bad depression and anxiety. 

My issue has always been how freaking long it takes to get an appointment that is actually helpful. When I make the appointment I need help ASAP. They set me up with an appointment two weeks out and it’ll just cover my basic information. Then another 2 weeks for an actual appointment. 

I’ve ended up in the mental hospital twice in the last few years bc I get so overwhelmed, I need therapy right then, so I go to the ER because it’s an emergency. Well, they hear emergency and assume I’m suicidal and send me away. 

I need someone right now. I have awful depression and everything I’m depressed about has layers and layers to it, like so many dimensions and one thing can give me anxiety or depression for a million different reasons.",3.907732558139537,6.367887273255818,5.959476744186045,71.48305232558141,74.52325581395348,11.044186046511626,30.51744186046513,10.820120047756994,4.4103069767441845,729,34,123,29,16,253,102,172,0.225,0.7120000000000001,0.063,-0.9849,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,0,10,10,0,1,10,1,11,0,0,3,1,24,25,17,1,5,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,1,0,0,6,11,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,8,2,4,1,1,19,2,14,22,1,25,0,5,0,0,8,9,0,2,13,86,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.2208774863959668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941674848637092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866984621476405,0.17315128063233828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632804575883176,0.0,0.1889864105525904,0.06898809882277879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3898966742082081,0.0,0.0,0.11823979226301265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023607145994007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171095618534476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825453758397565,0.10856410483936672,0.12863557535586775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127552141029761,0.0,0.1517125082234026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181213055487639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922496136637394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055289720377244285,0.0,0.0,0.10015292997897204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554263915190006,0.11473781012774575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140499278420384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3356599737721396,0.08728458815579282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668771813978231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500070725412034,0.11635881815117086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2899426993128187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958895706570129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12379089874699364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509064045713292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38826331013547705,0.13140045867037667,0.07518590100863821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055179509792457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18155818293545006,0.0,0.10175447905217157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728785272510434
mentalhealth,adadglgmut5577,2020/04/07,"I want to know what is wrong with me. Cannot connect with people, insecure, grown 30 year old man. I have zero confidence when talking in front of another person. It absolutely blows my mind that some people can talk in front of a crowd of people, and I can’t even talk to a coworker without trembling. It’s an innate insecurity that has never gone away no matter how hard I have tried.

I’m 30 and have no friends. I can’t communicate and connect with people. When I do communicate with another person, it feels like my mind is working in overdrive mode and I get filled with adrenaline. It feels similar to the second before a roller coaster drops, except it is a perpetual sense of tension and uneasiness for the duration of the conversation.

I feel emasculated and similar to a child. I’m not sure how long I can live like this. I was very, very suicidal a few years ago. But I’m worried I’ll get back to that state again. That depth of loneliness and dread is something I would never wish on anyone.",4.320615384615383,5.955257779487178,5.63692307692308,77.80307692307696,71.2051282051282,9.0974358974359,28.89743589743589,9.558583805096642,2.7304974358974348,797,31,150,19,15,267,113,195,0.161,0.741,0.098,-0.9274,0,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,7,10,0,5,10,0,16,0,0,2,3,32,28,12,1,3,4,0,4,2,1,1,0,0,0,4,11,12,0,0,4,1,0,5,9,6,0,2,2,4,14,4,24,25,2,24,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,1,13,99,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071510085111767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855926100890249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952200231567258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794532512907245,0.10471379506472676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11587890746779357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994541750352801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206569667140806,0.09728681570064464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521211010297273,0.0,0.14229656109252015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199027633668524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484081002959309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330610602212529,0.0,0.12024918339002702,0.12051476256653056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750053836216207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21006038304663374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428977031377628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3776394713906164,0.23781374911442565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10483779784791653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895850549278644,0.0,0.12834776989164232,0.0,0.0,0.3283682898827037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092457087503689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22472505375563026,0.08032232427989942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15659995172848815,0.13127238580325346,0.0,0.0991404545090322,0.13829711103772285,0.0,0.09673816244321676,0.1488911406475516,0.0,0.17539054343596291
mentalhealth,gamerGmr9,2020/04/07,"Intensified emotions, anxiety and depression Hi, I want to start from what i believe, is the root of my problems, my mother lost her mother at the age of 7, and my grandfather married another woman that was abusive, my mom told me she would get beat by her step mother very badly, she once told me she got a bad grade at school and her step mom banged my mother's head against the wall until she got her nose bleeding, she was very abused all her life by her step mom, first husband and my dad.
My mom is a very very deep thinker, I dont know how to explain it, but she gets the worst  of any situation and intensifies every situation and second of her life, she is very stressed, she plays with her fingers all the time, she doesent speak normally, she screams.
When I was little I did normal things as a normal child, but if I broke something or did any bad thing, she would scream at me, make me feel horrible, she did not beat me.
I started overthinking every second of my life wondering if what I was doing is good and would not lead to anything bad, I am always stressed, anxious, and sometimes depressed.
If somebody speaks to me, I get verry happy and my heart is pounding and I shake sometimes, I started controlling myself through the years as I realised I am emotionally unstable but I dont know how to get rid of my mental trauma and be calm and normal.
If a girl texts me, as I said, my heart starts pounding, I shake, I sweat, and overthink every letter of her text and I think what to say and I imagine how the conversation would go if I say the thing that I think at the moment, then I realise that it takes very much time and I start saying nonsense, I think I am annoying, I worry about my future, I worry that girls wont like me and I would be lonely.
I had some girlfriends but my anxiety kills me, I am a very cringe and awkward, and its because I cant be calm.
I hope I explained myself so that you understand, if you didnt, you are free to ask me anything",4.892658227848102,5.324987886075952,5.5385822784810115,83.49521518987342,68.87341772151899,8.244050632911394,29.977215189873423,8.109356740369918,1.9368612658227848,1545,56,314,19,25,501,181,395,0.247,0.71,0.043,-0.998,0,2,1,0,1,0,44.0,0,3,0,6,6,29,2,5,14,0,32,10,6,7,2,67,63,40,1,18,13,10,2,1,1,6,4,8,0,4,14,20,0,1,12,1,1,7,7,21,0,3,15,11,83,9,29,39,5,29,0,5,0,0,53,7,0,10,16,218,97,3,0.0,0.15969809098021495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05607592575921932,0.0,0.0,0.09165836813055094,0.07066687079758291,0.10311009550595633,0.07613429776298948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091650541662104,0.0,0.06300285317065205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250795578322292,0.0410818183522147,0.0,0.0,0.07592822493973429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558637484792301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609005480134682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15796692337718052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15161489436990452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703431635272218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03407565290056273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0573239923979632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14083911617364245,0.0,0.038300688311311296,0.05652559837894287,0.10779981401786023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174052726499472,0.0,0.0,0.06916410710676926,0.0,0.0,0.15972078013766258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693591937946207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07455977242083167,0.0,0.07407426755333885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280386345992258,0.03292455203204864,0.06754494996621528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356683150854347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04498499063523341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679157492182228,0.0,0.0,0.3157169405005881,0.0,0.0,0.04954121267780903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641212097135363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177077088551875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448548306254265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410566256880941,0.1607795683618708,0.0,0.06820476784746568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15150389827026098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051882008521946264,0.133305733134043,0.0,0.2385036517292347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15439567141040714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05067074313373205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13431766843520873,0.1295471023288494,0.0,0.0,0.07859417124268354,0.0,0.0,0.12879276792590547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015792801040008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3892408642382269,0.03974981922872478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730842485456096,0.0,0.13688062971006554,0.0,0.2393683514583733,0.0,0.0,0.04339853495594125
mentalhealth,boiled_beans,2020/04/07,"Help please? So I'm a teenager and recently I feel like I'm doing everything wrong. I get anxious whenever I do something, because I feel like I'm going to get yelled at. Every time someone I'm texting leaves me on read, I feel like it's my fault. I feel like I push people away, but I know I don't. I don't know if I have any real friends, but I know I do. I just feel like such a horrible person. I get like this sometimes. I just don't know why, and I feel like with answers I might feel better. I'm not sure.",-0.2991887905604713,1.5586113451327428,2.284269911504428,95.45761430678469,85.99115044247787,5.18259587020649,20.921091445427727,6.42735559955562,0.15636932153392324,394,13,94,4,12,136,60,113,0.11599999999999999,0.625,0.26,0.9281,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,5,12,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,0,1,24,28,6,0,1,6,0,7,7,1,1,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,12,1,0,2,4,2,0,0,0,8,20,10,5,27,0,7,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,9,47,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125677861759567,0.0,0.0,0.1349888265460255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122640715026017,0.0,0.0,0.07283952981356934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056785199328358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067483569739877,0.0,0.10738922150124347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4229214393241436,0.5121788087087781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09231708809699878,0.0,0.18728458378158205,0.0,0.06790848701519535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009111683319181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26267263895727083,0.0,0.0,0.12652184909461672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4086348389311924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675919772487712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283879183477795,0.10433339282990813,0.0,0.13116330027683115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11952157248019375,0.1360049112242127,0.0,0.0,0.1179812062442795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124284274921437,0.0919886523552197,0.11817791072061185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261719177139945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967513499917419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782045102669928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306427229201089,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jjjjddddaaaa,2020/04/07,"[United Kingdom] Anonymous Help? I believe there's a chance I have suffered s-xual tr--ma in the past because of my dad, and I know I have to see a professional about this, but I don't want my parents to know I'm seeking help.

I can't tell any close friends or teachers about this either, since they're very likely to report it and I'm very afraid of what might happen if they show up. Is there anything I can do given my situation?

I'm also 15 years old. If possible, I don't want whoever I'd be speaking to to have to tell my parents or anyone about it.

Please.",1.9351260504201693,3.4534954957983217,3.8257899159663857,88.82876890756303,77.23529411764707,6.104537815126051,25.345378151260505,6.742157984588678,0.8984615126050417,440,16,95,4,10,149,75,119,0.044000000000000004,0.825,0.132,0.8908,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,6,4,0,1,3,0,11,0,0,0,0,14,21,8,0,4,6,3,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,2,13,2,13,18,1,6,0,1,1,0,10,3,0,5,4,56,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14787649355783095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12574857065407966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929689797305405,0.0,0.15216932509882491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272249425832068,0.0,0.0,0.20833593163853414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286490398267573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351976236292753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478893117646157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20324894403123256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034014988263796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19616563937607895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19403723219827868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4106525453924208,0.0,0.1765223326881731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20298118892584024,0.0,0.2084639276615668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473533487166783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529636349240925,0.20785225664143506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232477971312803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051485536776877,0.21813536739605693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11907922539964425
mentalhealth,couldcaremore29,2020/04/07,"What are some online resources for someone who gets angry about even mild annoyances? We don't want to go see anyone about it in person right now, for the obvious reason",6.7346875,7.523103093750002,6.506250000000001,76.91375000000002,64.9375,8.9,28.5,8.841846274778883,2.2805125,137,4,23,2,2,43,30,32,0.207,0.7929999999999999,0.0,-0.7447,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,0,0,4,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,6,6,1,4,0,0,1,0,3,2,0,1,1,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29107107303158114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749475196402135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174879366377166,0.0,0.2365802313715548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3634776638442233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4280028451564579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3554989133612734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33171946116370715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35271077615031404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455313949888443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,altaverse,2020/04/07,"What has been your number one resource for improving your mental health? Hey everyone,

I have been listening to podcasts and reading books for the last few years working on improving my mindset,  mental health and general well-being.

A few of the best resources that I've found so far:

* Books and podcasts by Tim Ferriss
* Joe Rogans podcast
* Meditations by Marcus Aurelius 
* Impact Theory podcast with the founder of Quest Nutrition.

For the past week I've been putting together a list of free resources for people to check out while they are stuck on lockdown.

The next section that I am working is ""self improvement"" and I would love to hear from you on what books/podcasts/resources have had the biggest impact on your mental health and self development. 

The site for your reference: [https://lockdown.community/](https://lockdown.community/)

TLDR: looking for your recommendations for resource to add to a website.

Thank you and stay safe!",8.257692307692308,10.870210153846152,6.9530769230769245,68.3669230769231,62.84615384615384,9.046153846153846,36.07692307692308,9.516144504307137,3.846484615384615,768,36,110,15,12,231,95,156,0.012,0.8220000000000001,0.166,0.9758,0,3,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,7,1,4,1,5,0,0,10,0,11,4,0,1,0,15,18,8,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,2,4,9,0,1,2,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,6,3,12,6,24,11,4,17,0,0,1,1,14,9,0,0,6,74,16,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16231574906402033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779301784076626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16958675897598002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4932182774987003,0.17432339289484114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607601501059246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12988314635645465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13959496244402544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4676104270848051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644924144231603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480783083343873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14764922165271555,0.10722812614756548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15548523334601289,0.0,0.0,0.1547110232706348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3227073477920322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648567532711234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14239858906555408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240662767461709,0.0,0.13906615669024985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252019922234354,0.0,0.0,0.1098725389858988,0.0,0.0,0.09960187290479723
mentalhealth,DistinctRespect1,2020/04/08,"this is about dissociative disorders, so if you don't know that stuff continue strolling. i've been dissociating and it has been getting really bad. i keep on researching dissociative disorders and i keep of finding disorders that i have some symptoms of but i don't have all of them and i feel stupid. i started to look into  depersonalization and derealization disorder, and i started thinking i was finally on the right path, but then after looking into it more, i didn't have all of the symptoms.  i keep on googled the things im going through and i can't find anything to help me figure out what is going on. i was beaten by my sister a lot when i was 4-10 years old so it is possible that i have some sort of dissociative disorder but i don't think i do. i feel as if i'm going crazy and i just want to die knowing that i will never know what is wrong with me. even if i had all of the symptoms, i wouldn't be able to get help because of my crappy family and health care. i feel so stupid looking on yahoo answers for help, but can anybody please help me find out what is going on, and what is wrong with me? i'm sorry for wasting your time, but thank you for reading this whole thing.",4.427541322314049,5.082102859504136,5.765774793388431,80.6641167355372,69.99173553719008,8.859917355371902,29.587809917355372,9.017664075816787,2.2676190082644623,940,35,194,17,16,317,119,242,0.187,0.713,0.1,-0.9774,0,0,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,3,1,1,7,8,3,0,5,0,27,4,0,0,4,50,54,23,1,5,9,1,3,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,16,15,0,3,13,1,0,4,7,6,0,0,7,6,32,2,31,44,8,26,0,0,3,0,9,11,0,7,11,144,48,3,0.09338214064104633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684554507354083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779701868606533,0.05692488619308874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520931597697467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691591884675636,0.0,0.5351201171194775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06167802318546747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08803237139869068,0.0,0.14165044838248916,0.0,0.0,0.10229557058929227,0.2560487543573927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975766285584532,0.0,0.21228489007432874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09926084875567064,0.0,0.0,0.2503683218425984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086873634811787,0.0,0.0,0.24900701175584394,0.0,0.0,0.15396114702708508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23525243773613774,0.0,0.0,0.07939015659606694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202206368873805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979888480359244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250554829333353,0.0,0.10527433264832163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340741117450978,0.0,0.059822990481024726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07974783787610562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10453366113919196,0.13219271956194548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690020955259223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.291179398527295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597372881600543,0.0,0.0,0.1240778897019958,0.1196710102344114,0.0,0.0,0.0544518771670765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05507920599792595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10425782515722944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20419742283391326,0.0,0.060135036919089
mentalhealth,superhiro93,2020/04/08,"How to cope with job burn out? I’m working through my last three weeks at my current job. I’ve had anxiety since I was in high school, and a new issue that’s making my job even more difficult is I’m chronically burnt out. I’ve worked countless over time and weekends (I’m a claims adjuster, this is the unfortunate norm for the majority of us), I’m berated by angry policyholders day in and day out, and I’ve reached my breaking point. I’m physically, and mentally unable to complete my day to day tasks and my anxiety has flared to the point of barely being able to open emails and voice mails. My performance has slipped to an all time low. I can’t even see the light at the end of these three weeks, but I know I need to power through. Taking off is not an option for me right now as my work piles up with my absence. For those of you that have experienced something similar- what are some coping mechanisms that have helped you? I exercise regularly, and sleep at least 7 hours a night but it does nothing for my stress and anxiety levels. Physically, I have chronic headaches and have been losing weight. 

Any advice is appreciated.",3.9751332327802937,5.840889502262442,4.896070889894421,81.82825917546508,72.52941176470588,8.350025138260433,28.114881850175966,8.998388855275968,2.2617358471593776,904,35,178,19,18,294,134,221,0.075,0.885,0.04,-0.5359,5,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,1,2,0,6,4,4,0,1,10,0,16,5,1,2,1,27,26,14,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,8,16,1,0,2,2,0,0,2,4,0,2,3,5,20,0,32,22,5,35,0,2,1,0,6,18,0,2,16,109,28,7,0.12916743386676807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622092144690478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783828436944377,0.0,0.2964382000837916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542959689603684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3332092363554981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303529182078513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1144040074804025,0.0,0.0,0.17062774372383654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657820818824394,0.13647248566446574,0.0,0.0,0.12720390356060046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13481724220403493,0.3845362417522774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098704363295029,0.10528869834916206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14450531874690956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622026510762942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301703928330286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09577601553759686,0.0,0.12475071252175082,0.0,0.12121488664202427,0.0,0.12393963646011982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24420995121672795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030828276335174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307243389933474,0.1029297214277758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684863607402216,0.0,0.12926071704273887,0.0,0.0,0.09943940114049744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14796085908317844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711783518232364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506371388493997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15537251897506593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20722064837683465,0.15729113654043864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821062906951592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Eslin-96,2020/04/08,"I can't be alone without feeling breathless and/or crying About 3.5 years ago I did 6 weeks of cognitive behavioural therapy because I was feeling down and it was either that or antidepressants. I didn't find that it helped much so I gave it up and struggled on alone. I was able to pull myself out of a slump by getting two new jobs and going to college, where I met my boyfriend. We eventually got into university and that's where I'm at in life right now.

My boyfriend and I broke up a few days ago after 2.5 years together. I did not want to break up at the time! I love him a lot but he didn't want to settle with his first, afraid that he would miss out on something better.

We've decided to be friends, and I've accepted the break up and told him as much. We've had very casual, upbeat conversations often. Nothing much has changed in our interactions tbh. 

I don't have many friends! I have 1 online friend, and then my boyfriend. I speak with my sister, but she's very busy, and I don't think it's fair to contact people as soon as I'm feeling this way as it's not fair to use them like that and also burden them with my issues.

When I'm alone I get waves of very strong negative emotions, I feel breathless and cry, and struggle to control recurring negative thoughts. It's like how I was before I went to CBT, only not as bad. I'm terrified of spiralling downwards!

I can't go to a doctor about it due to the quarantine - and I don't particularly want to as the last time I went I was asked if I was on my period, which made me feel like I wasn't being taken seriously! My dad was recently diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder, and sometimes I'm afraid I have it too.

What can I do to lessen the blow from these attacks of loneliness and pain? I'm so discontent with being by myself.",3.549861998985285,4.7567112109589065,4.7474277016742805,85.10384069000509,72.50684931506851,8.037544393708776,27.491121258244554,8.515128840125781,1.818036022323693,1412,51,296,24,27,466,188,365,0.166,0.706,0.128,-0.9163,1,4,1,0,0,0,36.0,2,0,2,4,13,22,1,4,9,0,29,6,0,4,0,53,61,31,0,5,9,2,5,3,3,1,5,1,0,0,17,24,0,1,10,1,0,5,14,11,0,2,22,6,44,11,51,34,6,47,0,2,0,1,25,19,0,4,23,194,61,3,0.10124982760365432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17950372621123745,0.0,0.0,0.3145928581411526,0.0,0.08096945055408719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946549210873682,0.11518629579885695,0.0,0.0,0.08453937684092701,0.061720955140264364,0.0,0.08615614588853468,0.0,0.0,0.08954724453546642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10710889235662843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135602911050883,0.0,0.0,0.2224363625939642,0.06529776261510792,0.0,0.0,0.10276644372558152,0.0,0.0,0.11604107430747655,0.10363348887488684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389242819988665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559747752666685,0.0723328970707228,0.0,0.0,0.09254050813445408,0.08612305163616996,0.0,0.0,0.2346760969365796,0.0,0.10579771198077026,0.0,0.11508522066069905,0.0,0.08097873648241892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786562518796231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056785144871609,0.1004748307919332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08253212313145229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151574754959826,0.1483966543224216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607898270052798,0.09138192246949436,0.09580503499699143,0.0,0.1026514334012708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232908197294903,0.0,0.0,0.09778771442721976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715194030865754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770050563845492,0.10773695521391677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019388191816063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09997198988839297,0.0,0.0,0.08646679955386165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794706390831478,0.10013866845140224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21169660701158668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578800187475133,0.0,0.0,0.06487680123956913,0.0,0.08038105340180958,0.11807917741047155,0.0,0.0,0.09674854924133064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890636939340804,0.0,0.0,0.08744734246570081,0.0,0.2506251345383115,0.17915931483963718,0.08036740036023174,0.08121650440819796,0.0,0.0,0.1877192091344067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09760122070139897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192497253016468,0.0,0.0,0.13040313874151785
mentalhealth,0300sarkara,2020/04/08,"Has anyone ever experienced this? 
Hi guys,

I’m a 21 (F) was recently diagnosed by my psychiatrist with add, generalized anxiety, and depression. Have been diagnosed in the past too with add. I recently started medication because I’ve come to a point where I need help and feel helpless. I was prescribed 10mg of adderall to start with cause I’m really bad with effects of medication. The first day was fine. However, when the medicine started to wear off, I became really aware of some bodily sensations specifically my blinking and breathing. Since then I’ve been more aware of it and keeping thinking about it. Is there a way to stop this? Is this common when adderall wears off? or am I experiencing something else? Please let me know as I’ve never had this experience before and it’s very uncomfortable.",3.958239795918367,6.938153952380958,5.331900510204083,73.19948341836735,77.50340136054422,9.1171768707483,30.27593537414966,9.516144504307137,3.6265241496598657,649,31,108,20,16,216,98,147,0.12300000000000001,0.831,0.046,-0.909,1,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,7,4,0,0,6,0,12,7,3,2,2,25,23,10,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,7,12,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,6,3,8,1,18,16,2,22,0,2,0,0,3,5,0,2,15,68,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226176289683233,0.0,0.0,0.11207503782927973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338313264826346,0.09770828230422746,0.0,0.1363907769345174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646569048583502,0.0,0.1380713829638426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337060093986207,0.0,0.1380532836934631,0.3253719153283219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389759679265287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449870094646868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15678954086426622,0.0,0.0,0.08104494024007973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13633838658272604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15870740522362803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743569423948338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246872224943802,0.0,0.0,0.08808847485192106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16390232920136785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3229406617529141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188493379119212,0.12362171629403534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301022239421944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17594485857067296,0.15152118644055124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20536542215916606,0.0,0.3165243113406762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13258945449870385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339526677497653,0.0,0.0,0.3403517624359426,0.0,0.0,0.13400548373938867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10270419173043152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322519574448884,0.0,0.1272268166396487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adrenalina2020,2020/04/08,"Admitted I feel suicidal to someone and they are now avoiding me Not proud to admit it but I have been self medicating with coke and alcohol to deal with my depression. I've attempted recovery numerous times and failed and after a binge things came to a head and I I genuinely felt like I wanted to die. My family are somewhat supportive but also dont quite understand. My mother gives me ultimatum that if I dont stop she will disown me. Which I understand but also makes me feel I have noone to turn too nor can I admit if I mess up.

So I stupidly opened up and admitted everything to my child father and ex. We've also recently gotten back on good terms and he used to be really abusive so why I felt the need to tell him is beyond me! But he's apparently spiritually enlightened and has apologized for past hurt he put me through so I guess I felt I could confide in him.

Anyway he seemed taken back but said he understood and wasnt judging me.. but now I feel judged and the fact he is avoiding me makes me feel even worse! He said he would call me back and I still havent heard from him and it's been 2-3 days and nothing.. maybe I'm overreacting but I feel extremely anxious and really regret telling him.

I've since attended recovery meetings and signed up for therapy because I really want help, I just feel even more shame and guilt for admitting it and now he's being weird. Has anyone experienced this or am I overreacting?",3.430131578947368,5.330194859649122,5.105811403508773,79.60713815789477,74.08771929824562,9.381578947368425,26.96271929824561,9.827888789773867,2.7492719298245607,1145,43,223,33,24,388,158,285,0.213,0.6990000000000001,0.08800000000000001,-0.9921,1,4,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,4,19,15,1,4,4,0,21,4,1,3,1,69,56,35,2,8,12,3,9,1,0,2,2,3,0,2,7,22,2,3,19,0,0,3,6,11,0,0,13,13,41,4,23,38,3,25,0,4,0,0,36,7,0,6,16,146,48,1,0.0,0.12278056910696378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074531445379923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486104500826707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11706855542884342,0.0,0.07245812417735199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390473636010399,0.0,0.06316981006189659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1058143389346367,0.11852121744678527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08273740338092414,0.0,0.0,0.06683058051336425,0.10683446850139397,0.0892534338305513,0.0,0.10754804436072946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24289919351295505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13688877642735708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313290108120302,0.0,0.09768993058134193,0.0,0.3143803182724925,0.0,0.2984933440625742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940807181626854,0.0,0.08691707077372772,0.0,0.0,0.1141563765940251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063507820315298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945872180870925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093441246118432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050626719596636865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834311274640534,0.0,0.10410684234171426,0.0,0.0,0.10439289169303176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683780663037405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09943251206167784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892330985899654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10417334913531613,0.0,0.1102196386944607,0.0,0.0,0.1991575494698024,0.0,0.10231876027206573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971452428733801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433775951383494,0.10810513798200926,0.0,0.0,0.0857209896579179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08780247707478908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275633207300608,0.08663647293187042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133506748943351,0.11759423118818195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18114842190162214,0.0,0.11850604173659328,0.0,0.06884490465883128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060425500483048185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11271597747970055,0.0,0.21575787852215492,0.0,0.0895001057812905,0.0,0.0,0.1222433003887669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350688327584164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560435266583187,0.07361335940301479,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lifeisabigmood,2020/04/08,"My friend has ptsd and I want to help So I’m currently living in the UK if this helps at all. I’ve known my friend for about a year and a half, and after a year she gave a mutual friend of ours permission to tell me about her being raped when we first started knowing each other by an absolute twat who is currently on trial.
I don’t know much about ptsd and she recently got upset with me because I accidentally said something triggering, I apologised and we made up and I told her that I’d respect her process and she can dictate our relationship going forward, as well as saying that I’d do my best to make it up to her. 
I want to help her as much as I can and not mess up again, are there any particular resources or advice anyone can offer? Anything I can do to make her life easier going forward?",6.9803181818181805,5.357543236363637,7.829507575757577,75.66426136363638,65.12121212121212,11.15909090909091,33.35227272727273,10.125756701596842,3.035318181818182,634,21,131,12,8,215,103,165,0.077,0.72,0.203,0.9563,2,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,4,0,0,2,8,9,1,1,6,0,11,2,0,4,1,25,26,16,0,3,3,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,6,12,0,0,3,0,0,4,2,3,1,2,5,2,26,6,24,20,5,20,0,0,0,1,27,8,0,2,12,96,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15604963516799342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859635686782802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116606892718537,0.0,0.13141329755729045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0973470485575746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167587396843064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13583433487864902,0.0,0.0,0.3701340225839132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18151382360263765,0.0,0.12772065783120848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211154928929261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17552561229298438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11279551545371905,0.0,0.0,0.14101137824350068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110487795786098,0.21319192983063395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347846823526893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3733439074897033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15767705039473667,0.17144995140392913,0.0,0.0,0.15190410982782018,0.1269938631099659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12293906660969713,0.0,0.0,0.11303115342650365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395782590267913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15259300021309374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18838151463686995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358271038441506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056734321476721
mentalhealth,throwaway364738,2020/04/08,"Please help me focus I can’t remember much from school.
I read over the stuff, but my brain is all fuzzy and can’t take any of it in and when I try to read the same part again, I don’t remember much of it, if at all. Sometimes this is not a problem and I am normal. It’s like my brain is not as sharp as it used to be. It’s also like I can read each word but the big picture is burry. I’m also less aware of the things around me as well, and apathetic.
I feel like I shouldn’t have a physical form, and that I shouldn’t really exist. I am genuinely surprised every time that I have a reflection, so I don’t really like going near mirrors. For the most part, it feels like everything is blurry, but mentally.

This was not really a problem until around the middle of last year, does anyone know anything about what happened and how I can stop it?",4.045572012257402,4.073364691011236,5.371470888661902,85.37337589376921,70.62921348314606,8.944637385086823,25.170582226762004,8.841846274778883,1.491723595505618,657,16,147,11,11,221,100,178,0.040999999999999995,0.785,0.174,0.9695,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,0,10,0,19,2,2,2,2,35,27,19,0,6,7,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,14,9,0,1,6,3,0,1,9,2,1,0,1,3,17,7,19,23,11,16,0,0,0,0,1,8,0,2,12,110,31,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976348093119468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08403057911550277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08640172335955948,0.0,0.101686058498786,0.22000370237036435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758858429694401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081353204969317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411149555685928,0.0,0.11105508521301877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12495953857239755,0.176554221644417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022662709285378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092709066728498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282512602638588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790982347839827,0.10072453441127696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30184578132909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452763133949575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18167361589816505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107055068503872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676245289525393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13564072153084364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364760620032144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37080476693170417,0.0,0.2374827624869173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27995725083486617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250575644658603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12221205966394035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033085061488131,0.0,0.0,0.14145596796398005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290787031416016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820931879562352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205358178774282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389466240704291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672320693037536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110260650143687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957383705365371
mentalhealth,marorr,2020/04/08,"«Suicide is selfish!» Well yeah, I guess you’re right. Suicide is kind of selfish. You know what else is selfish? Giving birth to a child you’re not ready to raise properly. Causing childhood issues that more often than not actually cause these mental health issues...",3.2724620060790284,6.43956414893617,3.0966565349544086,84.82000000000002,88.36170212765957,4.387841945288755,25.863221884498486,6.1826913282559595,1.2586924012158065,213,9,33,2,7,64,36,47,0.243,0.638,0.11900000000000001,-0.8397,0,0,0,0,0,2,9.0,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,2,0,7,6,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,0,2,2,4,6,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,2,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.2070288899734664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4358752799542029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17722503814036933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20351468574361256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23370837683183399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22550671994864646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44286130142096336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2209227448078944,0.11659270733240895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21379843050515893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18117589732386435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4641177835655746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19074933522409085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cadetg375,2020/04/08,"Do i hate my family? okay if you asked me that question, my answer would immediately be no. my family has been so accepting, loving, and supportive of my success my entire life. we have our arguments and trying times as everyone does, but for the most part i am fully aware that they love me. 

but for whatever reason, i feel resentful around them. it’s easier for me to tolerate them if i just tell myself to perceive them as normal people rather than “my family” and i often have give myself a mental slap on the wrist when my mind lashes out at them internally just for existing. 

it makes sense when they’re being rude or inconsiderate or something, but this happens even when we are having a good time and laughing. i thought maybe it was because i havent let go of some of the things that happened between us when i was younger (nothing insane, just your usual amount of childhood trauma — most people have been there) and maybe i havent been able to talk about that enough. then i thought maybe it was because i have spent so much time around them, being as my parents are strict so i am often stuck in the house. but then i moved away for college and even coming home i feel like i am best when i am detached. 

so why do i feel this resentment towards them? it’s not all the time and i honestly get really happy when i am able to feel genuine positivity around them, but when it does happen i cant help but wonder why im so annoyed when there is usually no underlying issues at hand. 

if anyone else ever feels this way, that’d be really interesting to hear also. (18 y/o female haha)",4.591486013986014,5.7453914935897465,5.6742424242424265,79.64045454545455,69.96153846153845,8.621445221445219,26.361305361305362,8.97023862654752,1.9869371794871797,1254,38,240,23,22,416,173,312,0.125,0.703,0.172,0.9631,1,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,4,2,8,2,29,20,5,0,7,2,32,5,2,2,2,54,56,37,0,6,16,1,6,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,15,14,0,0,13,0,1,3,6,6,0,0,10,7,47,14,31,39,9,33,0,0,0,2,24,11,0,12,19,187,62,2,0.1892020854735193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07565241969817134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614724866534495,0.09692994771782508,0.0,0.2526449538644346,0.08843920475680439,0.0,0.08888079372708457,0.0,0.0,0.11533583519439072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927795793170252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149042176893516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16557202000823107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790270322658933,0.0,0.0,0.09774816559980504,0.0,0.12496619304789335,0.08557205916730756,0.0,0.09039535037359687,0.0,0.0,0.2675443314450621,0.0,0.23916564825499584,0.0675830038333232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049425140315908084,0.09074994033351597,0.053763952669185884,0.07934686633152176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25096616900212537,0.10070456909252247,0.0,0.09339894438817893,0.0,0.0,0.10662225055869164,0.0,0.06340908484205279,0.0,0.09489255916252497,0.0,0.0,0.10915690193909293,0.0,0.0,0.10218535977613803,0.09873891049466198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673597561507764,0.06681951417018195,0.04621729099793837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17076226908245884,0.0,0.06314693061592279,0.0,0.28511838802033285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533560067594032,0.0,0.09552008543826436,0.0,0.0,0.10054593711467928,0.06954265134700409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268893617881116,0.09077225191015262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050432626805567,0.10244371047959433,0.0,0.13116890330308684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059748183308812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120770075062128,0.09726562771480762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282850448754033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735214222459884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760367347279977,0.08268548106167192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06284872924205613,0.0,0.0,0.15020532178794346,0.2206505151249518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422789824272468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379340649315005,0.0,0.20837936687978506,0.0,0.0,0.07508990440835234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072545363800015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259079543770856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720186652367985,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HighJuice_Gin,2020/04/08,"I want to throw it all away Financially stable, hunkered down, got a beautiful girlfriend.

versus

I don’t want any of this I don’t deserve any of this I am an embarrassment got rid of all my friends don’t like going out don’t like anyone I think everyone is a t*** fearful of the world and what’s coming don’t want to enjoy life don’t see the point in life want to end it.

Ya get me?",0.20520749665328,2.243410216867474,2.650040160642572,92.48890227576977,85.3855421686747,5.616599732262381,20.065595716198125,6.937597516519254,0.28743748326639906,300,9,69,4,9,103,52,83,0.071,0.665,0.264,0.91,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,2,5,0,8,2,0,0,2,11,19,1,0,4,1,0,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,3,6,2,0,0,2,1,8,4,11,17,2,10,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,0,3,40,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958446026228614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520963188775849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20436891658488465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873757930211596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926597745759049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20785142712483987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2447725297285116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805682373828526,0.0,0.11364617657931625,0.0,0.12362266691790658,0.0,0.34794415165135584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30728419819516306,0.21254035416784814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20562843551904048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733367332506507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13937920341629673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5132000367845506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ikilled5kids,2020/04/08,"Depression. I'm on the verge of suicide and my family won't stop bugging me bout it. I have gone to a therapist. She did tell them that I have depression but they did not believe it. They think that kids can't get depressed.
I have no goals.
I have nothing to live for.
I have nobody.",-0.5096798493408627,1.7104087288135617,1.5666666666666664,95.50653483992468,97.30508474576271,5.334086629001884,20.11487758945385,6.937597516519254,0.5758346516007529,221,8,49,4,9,73,43,59,0.17300000000000001,0.743,0.084,-0.6432,0,0,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,3,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,9,0,0,0,0,5,13,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,3,0,11,0,5,9,0,4,0,3,0,0,6,2,0,0,1,35,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.288734424848307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6621884397458287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24159347875754275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389323020792734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262957231058832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24590299478798236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142575673699158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28032350626388897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223995846645686,0.0,0.0,0.2975552942260045,0.0,0.16421081932475898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lavasworld,2020/04/08,"Free Protocol for Depression, anxiety breaking free from EGO and much more!!! Hey guys, I have created a protocol that got me out of Depression, Mental Fears like being scared of butterflies lol and anxiety and broke free from my EGO and many other things, if you know anyone that is dealing with depression and can not afford therapy, go ahead and direct them to my 
IG: Lavasworld God bless you guys, much ❤️",11.5428,8.57345714666667,10.522666666666666,64.14800000000001,57.53333333333333,15.333333333333336,42.33333333333333,13.5591,5.691533333333332,326,13,56,10,3,104,56,75,0.23399999999999999,0.5489999999999999,0.217,-0.4168,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,2,1,1,0,11,0,2,1,1,4,0,0,0,0,11,7,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,8,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,6,0,0,1,0,7,8,9,5,3,4,1,4,0,0,7,1,0,1,2,36,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109064125662465,0.0,0.0,0.14208743164789725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094980433619335,0.5250670503571697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286649693019516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548752373136813,0.0,0.1625236272313675,0.0,0.0,0.4024148111567458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167754561506793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927693604981326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20602054343606294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20478539800175768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987618357302228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20344619003557668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23238552331132697,0.0,0.13500205527091494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NixNonFix,2020/04/08,"Dostoyevsky Surviving Self-Isolation Fyodor survived the firing wall and years of solitary confinement in Siberian prisons for many of his revolutionary works which were labeled as treasonous ideas. This dangerous introspection is what became the groundwork of modern psychology. A predecessor to Freud and Erikson, Fyodor explores the depths of mans consciousness in search of the best way to deal with the human condition, in Notes from Underground.

YT: [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KsdM0\_q3lQE&t=57s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KsdM0_q3lQE&t=57s)

Soundcloud: [https://soundcloud.com/user-570445450/nicks-non-fiction-notes-from-underground](https://soundcloud.com/user-570445450/nicks-non-fiction-notes-from-underground)

ApplePodcasts: [https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast](https://www.youtube.com/redirect?q=https%3A%2F%2Fpodcasts.apple.com%2Fus%2Fpodcast&redir_token=86vIbKMbGjRM4NYQc1qp6J5opmF8MTU4NjQzNzMwN0AxNTg2MzUwOTA3&event=video_description&v=KsdM0_q3lQE)...",41.968,53.17440573333334,19.335666666666672,-21.300499999999968,-8.333333333333329,14.06666666666667,47.16666666666666,12.745084868956482,8.222466666666666,910,26,43,17,6,191,62,75,0.106,0.775,0.11800000000000001,0.2593,0,1,0,0,0,0,102.0,0,0,0,4,0,2,1,0,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,1,14,1,1,9,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,29,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8796949365154011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040810687347951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167406959295207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18330759380077852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16462813769288034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16939806681886402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953235076463006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12888992402866226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821479240377154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456758940911497
mentalhealth,Liberty6000,2020/04/08,"Depression My best friend is battling depression right now. She is choosing to isolate herself from the world for the most part and in my own personal experience and with countless friends and family who have also battled depression, isolation only makes it worse. If it was just stress then it could help but it only makes depression work as far as I know. What should I do? I have lost 1 friend and 5 family members (1 to depression almost exactly a year ago) in the past year and a half and I'm terrified of loss right now. She isn't depressed, it's still the early stages but I've seen it get worse and worse over the past year. She doesn't feel like anything has a point anymore and she doesn't want to bum her friends out. I want to help but I don't know what to do. Any help would be appreciated.",3.5049711538461534,5.241135362500003,4.255000000000003,86.47769230769234,73.5,8.173076923076923,26.68269230769231,8.841846274778883,1.9217211538461545,638,23,132,13,13,204,93,160,0.264,0.574,0.162,-0.9467,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,4,5,17,2,1,8,0,16,0,0,2,1,29,27,16,0,6,5,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,0,1,9,10,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,11,0,1,3,2,13,6,15,20,4,21,0,8,1,0,15,9,0,3,12,84,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574246201904044,0.0,0.10815428245693433,0.0,0.0,0.08637385649871768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344905694796386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711478679334943,0.0,0.0,0.08888127607957197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11334759847854385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623549739350149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5581621331541667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10565242424726796,0.2036404192003193,0.0,0.054612025535249686,0.077160845590149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337864570200109,0.0,0.056429655444033625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21718620039042327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11871660399091145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052767190743429705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11790335148136337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14419218698132494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16428970789153946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696200046823545,0.20621147101333534,0.0,0.09430830808100464,0.0,0.0,0.1021023506033814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18447626568935974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625522638075504,0.0,0.12372265286012947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741168300284145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863101744071099,0.0,0.3302077478959084,0.07672569362249504,0.0,0.0,0.2086605858548773
mentalhealth,frothyorpheus,2020/04/08,"what to do This story starts at 13 I buy a Juul after moving to Cali to fit in at my new school in this new city. I get caught with it my first time when I'm suspended for (in my innocents) dropping my Juul outside the bathroom in front of a camera. my parents where relatively chill as they believe I'll deal with it with a therapist that they force me to see which didn't work for months at which point I was tired of it and put my foot down as all it was, was someone talking about dealing with my feelings and I had no trouble doing that ever I'm a very open person just one with bad self-control at the face of the social benefits that go with certain drugs. But then one day, Mark, the head of my middle school catches me with my phone oh nooooooo, this is relevant later when I get called into the office, however, and this will come in later. I have no clue why I'm there but I'm terrified 'cause I have Juul pods in my bag. This is where my problem really begins I got the pods the night before with this kid ""mike"" who I'm trying to keep away from this he took a picture of me with the bb gun and sent it to someone who didn't like me, who used it to say she was scared and get my bag searched. in there where the pods mike had asked me to buy from him. I didn't even have the Juul. I'm back in therapy which not only doesn't help but makes me resent dealing with my shit as i resented therapy now. I get caught twice more cause this kid ben and I was homies and he would buy ounces on ounces of weed and thousands of pods. My parents watched me start to go down but catch myself in time. I stayed clean and quit pretty much for good only getting a vape for like a week years later. I started going to a new private school after forcing the school to let me finish the year from home and recommend me plus clean my record. I'm clean till like mid-early 9th grade where I'm depressed cause I'm avoiding social interactions and parties cause everyone there smokes and I know I don't have the control bout me not smoke myself at that point. I'm socially isolated and the therapist my parents get me makes me feel like an addict and I decide why not act like one in an act of impulse and decide to smoke with this kid jake again. this time though I get this stizzy (weed) that I mostly only use it with my friends cause I liked the social benefits and being with people not having to worry or constantly think about self-control and not being the kid who doesn't go to parties or party at all in la. then I get caught with it like that week when I decide to use it at home and my dad looks through the bathroom window. my parents maybe due to all the addicts in my family, maybe cause of what happened to my friend, or maybe cause my mom is a shrink, send me to rehab after catching me vaping four times and smoking once. this was pointless, as a boy who grew up with a therapist mother, with coping mechanisms that were ingrained within me from birth and slammed in for years by therapy clearly this was not addiction it was social pressure that would subside with time but. they made a case that I was an addict and I spent a month at rehab where I was discharged cause the rehab specialists didn't think I needed it after this I went to summer camp and I was clean till the last week where these kids came with weed I was about to go home but had a fun week with them instead and left camp and didn't smoke all summer. this year I stayed clean for a month till I started losing friends again missing out on things getting isolated and one of my friends had another disposable this time a different friend but he gave me a good deal n I thought one time I got caught with that then got clean for 7 months and was tired of avoiding my friends when they had those tight bonds and shit and I started up again I got caught and my dad made me see his life coach. I was the first kid he had worked with. I told my dad this explaining that our first 3 calls he was clearly trying to identify and unwind bad habits I had built so I could live a better life but I didn't need that cause I am a child. I'm still building habits. furthermore, my actions don't always reflect how I feel as compared to adults. He said ur getting coached or rehab pre COVID. This caused me a great deal of emotional strain as I was tired and over this therapy stuff and I lashed out. when I stopped caring what my parents thought and had a vape and delivered to the house to give to a kid than I got to weed and got caught ordering that too. I stopped for a week than COVID hit and I was clean another after committed to getting my parents to trust me. but then I lost it again when this kid who tried getting me off the football team last year got ahold of a video of me smoking as well as one of me snorting crushed up sugar which at the time was taken by my friend cause we were trying to prank our other friend but somehow this kid gets it. He for some reason wanted to get me in trouble so he sent them to the head of the school. it wasn't on school grounds and COVID is going down so no actions where taken but it was a whole thing I told them they could order any test they wanted they could even have my hair but id never ever do coke. then I got bored I was unpacking a box and found some weed I had forgotten I packed away my parents caught me 2 days after that incident smoking and then last week with my last bit. then I waited another month smoked again and was just caught now recently yes I have been doing it stupidly cause I'm bored and lonely and miss my friends. I'm just a kid trying to fit in with the la crowd and i slip up some times a total of maybe 15 accounting of all my usage from 2017-2020 and I'm stuck. I'm in therapy at a standstill and i may go to rehab. what do i do? I'm sure this wasn't too easy to follow but please i just want to know... i have 2 As 3 Bs and 1 C better than last year, I'm a generally mentally ok person when it comes to dealing with stuff when given time but it seems the more I'm assisted the worse I am helped what do you guys think. am i an addict? if not what do i do",3.7167254070125817,4.464361810725556,4.360226259110196,89.76106729758152,71.66561514195584,7.407172123717321,25.142535987526745,7.45992177437254,0.9722705029188878,4808,134,1056,50,87,1533,430,1268,0.106,0.7709999999999999,0.12300000000000001,0.9864,9,4,7,1,0,0,66.0,3,1,10,12,48,53,5,5,63,2,79,25,7,22,14,187,195,98,0,12,30,12,5,7,9,4,16,2,11,16,77,79,2,8,18,5,5,35,23,23,1,12,77,13,142,30,164,107,15,194,0,6,4,0,100,59,2,12,102,679,219,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17659659735478833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0269582788808377,0.0,0.0,0.02203219845567717,0.10191845349699782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03028837175788701,0.0,0.060879211429926076,0.02491256817294574,0.054103052319375095,0.0,0.0,0.027568871707050968,0.0365021929667529,0.0,0.057307960351711186,0.03537094338661343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06616530446536635,0.03705543368189717,0.03303259111588473,0.3993881569777436,0.0,0.055817150234033865,0.0,0.035011439493048496,0.10901354967323926,0.07760307639526443,0.0,0.0,0.04178890830660849,0.20040956283316574,0.027904916684428613,0.0,0.0,0.033849701935355005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03757215741814728,0.0,0.0,0.03644412954021232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0427980161356127,0.058612882087180976,0.0,0.030958306158777406,0.0,0.0,0.03054257138112312,0.0,0.04914520490759626,0.023145607768040283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267484590068902,0.0,0.035523456260360804,0.22528010540976365,0.0,0.23697746259328345,0.031079744977197094,0.12889032788874313,0.05434891441824264,0.2072973319833692,0.03571963485206793,0.0,0.03207976515647988,0.0286500262950568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06650074029751951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04343227508218245,0.0,0.09749548687853994,0.0,0.0,0.03738370143605448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028797415882805363,0.0,0.0,0.0356109103070561,0.13204615241640774,0.0,0.0,0.03520123674351961,0.033129822908837675,0.04576826061322442,0.11079843454791018,0.0,0.02860860860876412,0.0,0.027206712932140303,0.03624581107643232,0.035366962441290666,0.0,0.0,0.06131278718383505,0.04325271162543809,0.0,0.13019522665491326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032650227045513784,0.0,0.0,0.03794491670973614,0.12930149867958332,0.03443464615550185,0.02381674148720931,0.04804638881021706,0.02498784238432766,0.0938724774338537,0.0,0.030403945813045962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03450351342093398,0.13172501497769504,0.07392191810691394,0.0,0.0,0.25182412931406484,0.0,0.0,0.022461150104431258,0.0565785170293446,0.0,0.03556399737922845,0.0612544080144841,0.0,0.0,0.0329610827412602,0.0,0.03100114019748932,0.0,0.032569599886518266,0.0,0.0344599608413492,0.0,0.0,0.020755409947142714,0.03331121644062125,0.03198976619842596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030818543001703662,0.025764713249977995,0.03243670867660842,0.1967350296306944,0.05163507155823297,0.02949452145927556,0.06759773241383188,0.0,0.06651351376695998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16513175899652058,0.05490255561730042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146596845324094,0.0690653173563075,0.02587361015140764,0.054173457652876636,0.0,0.0,0.0741774242597679,0.0,0.0,0.03053535176807065,0.0,0.0,0.026040814082741292,0.0,0.0,0.1852534451245454,0.11285201728705715,0.043048457548409184,0.062279255589665725,0.03183151701454694,0.05144183101642201,0.1889191803864456,0.11171247410068633,0.0,0.06191661231755481,0.0359961011692154,0.10998281048279722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394611460493427,0.0,0.026732285934224075,0.057328703773811725,0.0,0.15592949527395558,0.0,0.029130284488674493,0.03003388057928567,0.05846949916093409,0.0361719446643544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047173217819608315,0.032902409894694874,0.03301700042429453,0.046030154198927566,0.0,0.0,0.12518204122592114
mentalhealth,yungstepppa,2020/04/08,"I feel like nobody cares about me It’s like I help everyone when they need it and always offer advice/support but when I’m feeling down or need some help nobody is there for me, even when I outright say I’m feeling shitty and would be good to talk to someone about things. I don’t understand why every single person treats me like I’m nothing, it makes me feel like there’s something wrong with me but no matter what I try nothing fixes it",3.4722380952380973,4.960045366666666,4.239841269841271,87.565,73.1111111111111,6.0317460317460325,23.968253968253972,6.1826913282559595,0.6388253968253967,353,10,69,2,7,113,57,90,0.11599999999999999,0.629,0.255,0.8422,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,8,8,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,17,16,8,0,3,3,0,4,4,0,1,0,1,0,1,6,3,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,11,7,7,14,2,4,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,2,7,42,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477642384475177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18105887589346256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11729265598329015,0.0,0.14962230519040312,0.16968926515662974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3591675274037383,0.2537323039328352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489491592723554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380618243445653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3470345815158644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185387988301046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633527935546919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34079356204907824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15505962970198395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122204347799844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15046647368462845,0.13671295434855327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015203885132896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273541269078568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797901813573268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205679806574002,0.0,0.0,0.1848713625883947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602420735780802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12615068474681107,0.19416038997481933,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaynxxx,2020/04/08,"I can’t take criticism hi
i’m writing this post because I need to understand the root of my hyper sensitivity, which i’ve been carrying for some time now. Growing up I’ve always felt everything in a deeper way than others and, even though this can be a positive thing to have when it comes to develop empathy towards others, the negative things that have been thrown on my way weren’t very well welcomed. I’ve always been shy and introverted, mostly as a personality trait but also as a result of home violence from an abusive dad, hence why as soon as I stepped in school many children felt like bullying me and this narrative went on up until nowadays. This negative environment brought to my soul feelings of neglect, worthlessness, self loathing that accumulated within me and never saw the opportunity to be processed in a healthy way, reason why I have an inner anger that lashes out whenever someone criticises me and a difficulty when it comes to recognise advice thrown in a little more harsh and honest way than usual from a hurtful comment. Later on, I developed some talents which I rationally think I’m pretty good at but wouldn’t let anybody question me in these things because I felt like that would’ve taken away from me the only things that I would be proud of (again, steaming from a background of self loathing). To get straight to the point, anything good about me, wherever it was something out of my personality/looks or the talents themselves, was my only weapon against the people who misunderstood me and I more than often feel like justifying everything I do.

it’s like: *look, you’ve always underestimated me and thought that I would be nothing by now but here I am to change your belief and demonstrate that I’m better than that*

just yesterday, my cousin told me that my hair were a little messy out of bed and I felt so bad...I felt like she was being mean to me but I still tried to keep it cool and told her that, next time, she can be a little warmer in her tone. She, on her side, told me that I have this inner anger that needs to come out everytime someone questions the slightest shit about me and that, at the age of 19, I should accept to be in the wrong and not always have the last word.
I don’t know what to do with myself anymore, this is just one of the many problems I have and I often look up to therapy, but can’t afford it. I hate the fact that my past is still shaping my personality and make me believe that I’m so worthless that I need to cling to an artificial ego. I lack confidence and I don’t know if I can really resolve this alone and move on, or if the blame relies entirely on the way I’ve been treated so that I could make peace with myself. Thank u",7.643231235037316,6.814674610266162,7.7560667511618115,74.15407196169555,63.35361216730038,10.682326432896774,35.07083509364878,9.906371001090498,3.247075566821575,2159,82,411,38,27,702,248,526,0.177,0.6809999999999999,0.14300000000000002,-0.9792,2,1,1,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,0,4,22,31,5,0,29,1,40,2,2,5,2,82,79,38,0,12,12,2,8,5,0,4,0,0,2,5,41,26,0,2,19,0,0,8,10,11,1,1,22,12,56,20,71,44,6,67,2,4,3,0,24,34,1,11,24,294,97,1,0.0,0.0866859292954046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07149382075806839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577457417019945,0.0,0.05850824782975314,0.24350917187308266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255781721439633,0.0,0.0,0.06020673313765389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873883912023944,0.0,0.06108786434555065,0.08919870185418657,0.0,0.0,0.08242939785005719,0.0,0.06470653240079458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739651900670623,0.1890697671652881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05841452561859296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048323325429362664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150797617117707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398659858492328,0.052267503843698083,0.35123870585764666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03822453227749665,0.0,0.0,0.12273093546408237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07223309719772247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338823253547203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783222679694523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503043948672871,0.0,0.0,0.08041669979052085,0.059637429685472435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481389832500926,0.0,0.17871819080709192,0.21998497493968347,0.0,0.0,0.18431492320351836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767344602869173,0.14835114884493386,0.0,0.07969571459355572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776045538861498,0.0,0.16274782047080766,0.056427645407176534,0.0,0.07780944534240412,0.0,0.0,0.07020165953730054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04957699243024893,0.11128718034418954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984215097287744,0.050721858815835325,0.12776583297956715,0.0,0.0,0.0691624743326318,0.0,0.0700697180978973,0.07443284860508703,0.0,0.07000689852995336,0.0,0.0,0.16391811284698773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04686994958446336,0.07522352192248556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404463819129037,0.0,0.0,0.15264946914221306,0.0,0.07510054113318275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398117022956301,0.05632428158448309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11685577942838757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05500930449043985,0.0,0.0,0.06735845705461088,0.08366801383781781,0.0,0.1944243973133966,0.04687975451668345,0.07188205877254619,0.05808307406147144,0.08532360943773902,0.0,0.0,0.2097305115983072,0.0,0.049672724322132114,0.0,0.0,0.07616503302816678,0.0,0.0,0.08057846456631061,0.060366954794213876,0.0,0.2903660421017933,0.0,0.0,0.06578212470109301,0.06782262899946725,0.13203605637666854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591821690078045,0.07999201340944834,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NotAMotherAnymore,2020/04/08,What’s protocol now for checking yourself into the hospital while the COVID situation is going on? I don’t want to take up beds for people with real problems.,6.3229999999999995,7.51006996666667,7.56666666666667,67.53000000000003,66.0,10.0,35.0,10.125756701596842,3.9819999999999993,129,6,20,3,2,44,28,30,0.09300000000000001,0.862,0.045,-0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,7,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,15,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.249431659337984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042715014439799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4199590595543212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4995536224681267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.493331457055876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3299911332403631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588690649112324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Prize-Midnight,2020/04/08,"Let's Have a Chat For context, I was talking with a friend about how so many people have had their mental health take a plunge with the quarantine, so decided to make this throwaway. 

If anyone wants to vent, ask questions or just chat, just go ahead and PM me. I'll be checking this account daily, so don't be afraid to say hi!",7.910454545454545,5.750103075757576,7.293030303030302,81.95954545454545,63.6969696969697,10.012121212121212,34.121212121212125,7.793537801064563,2.286430303030304,257,8,54,2,3,80,53,66,0.0,0.943,0.057,0.5411,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,7,2,0,1,4,0,8,1,0,2,0,12,13,7,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,2,2,1,1,1,0,0,2,1,3,1,8,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,9,0,0,3,1,34,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21203653350607696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834939136703875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342869742047344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17234159215349915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322336134372451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31008940430043336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20241894469548616,0.30744367291733943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056004700863181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21023247467850906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3397047280303405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24115325353960546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22800312298015166,0.24373750951326426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17886224597350225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JacSab,2020/04/08,"Dying before I'm 30 So I'm not sure if this is the right place to ask this but I'm at a loss. I have depression and anxiety, the depression is mostly under control and I haven't needed to take anything for it in the last few years but anxiety is a constant in my life.

I've always had issues where I'm convinced I'll die young in fact I can't see myself making it to 30 which is 4 years away. I'm not afraid of dying but I'm not planning on dying either right now. I haven't had a suicide attempt in 3 year. I've come to accept it and haven't thought about my future because I don't see a point.

What's getting to me is that this thought of dying before I'm 30 just never leaves me, I really can't see myself turning 30 and it's always been the same age it's never changed. I have no idea how I will die so I can't say for sure it will be suicide, I've no health issues that I know of but I can't rule out a sudden sickness or it could just be an accident.

Does anyone else feel like this or know why I'm feeling this way? More importantly has anyone felt this way and lived past the age they expected?",2.0624126984127003,2.8569087673469404,4.119149659863947,89.77319160997736,75.61224489795919,6.750566893424036,22.99886621315193,6.937597516519254,0.5808185941043087,868,23,200,8,18,299,121,245,0.146,0.735,0.11800000000000001,-0.8417,0,2,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,1,4,8,9,0,1,11,0,24,3,0,3,5,42,49,15,8,4,13,0,3,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,17,7,0,1,9,0,0,1,15,4,0,0,6,7,18,5,20,38,5,31,0,3,3,0,3,14,0,4,15,121,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15755015174664064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484835491907344,0.0,0.0,0.13239437912519014,0.09700312942465504,0.07790737300811623,0.0,0.08850597598806131,0.0,0.0889478983561749,0.0,0.0,0.05771145663480402,0.0,0.1611185914400845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015091604454032,0.08155194669797675,0.0,0.10230730287679833,0.10618322092801877,0.07558826063614621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16308251270573984,0.0,0.5895304379291846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284851309687878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07908669734611971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957384869293374,0.06763402871974547,0.09090041411008208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04946245609099916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10063240441211853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687369068861896,0.0,0.19762691592170886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405902297235893,0.07717069566170545,0.0,0.10024447200672268,0.0,0.0,0.06686996262508836,0.04625218486015455,0.0,0.08359752207279962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06319460628554142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07019843404495353,0.14603448450376846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037558133394448,0.0,0.0,0.09891257709861664,0.0,0.0894960813382305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06064960602993912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16169953758695532,0.0,0.07528734494115041,0.0,0.0,0.2263250946603679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20711262396642974,0.0,0.17845535784987362,0.0,0.07118191239599853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15031872618031333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297645726645993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029319394688753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542717532222696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828978926870316
mentalhealth,Teh-Voice-of-Reason,2020/04/08,Books are The Holy Grail of Calming Down So an hour and a half ago I started to become a nervous wreck and set the objective of settling into the fight for smoking cigarettes every hour on the hour.  First I paced then sat and did nothing then after that started my D. B. T. Handouts and Worksheets book and reached a new level of calmness.  Ultimately you need a certain level of calmness to even read but once you do you'll become very calm.,8.70767441860465,7.026151046511633,8.162441860465119,74.83575581395351,61.79069767441861,9.995348837209304,40.1046511627907,8.07648339933343,3.3743348837209304,354,16,64,3,4,112,62,86,0.061,0.805,0.134,0.6586,0,0,1,0,1,0,6.0,0,3,0,1,2,7,1,1,9,0,4,0,0,0,1,9,8,9,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,6,5,11,5,0,17,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,11,42,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829146436554709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4557892914153666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13629060386895292,0.0,0.17385670190271696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17551911186527286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6096322832055486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530040860753379,0.0,0.1992917396855474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19799602957638415,0.0,0.0,0.21975339533678093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064033802855257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921077013444515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702583307239438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lauralive,2020/04/08,"Video: Managing mental health during coronavirus I made this from my living room. Hope it can be helpful for some folks. Licensed clinical psychologist Jade Wu shares advice for feeling mentally healthy and strong during the pandemic. Includes bonus tips for combatting 'rona nightmares. 

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=\_BavR37FSnQ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_BavR37FSnQ)",16.546,22.981142600000002,8.312777777777779,48.82249999999999,56.33333333333333,10.111111111111112,38.611111111111114,9.725611199111238,5.892111111111113,327,14,27,8,6,80,42,45,0.0,0.6579999999999999,0.342,0.9536,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,1,0,5,5,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,4,4,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,13,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168147548948046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393057363308886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3446206078759415,0.0,0.0,0.21731146858984127,0.0,0.0,0.32201418686102984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2862838172450673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3067758205400017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6534558712963299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ecurrencyhodler,2020/04/08,"Are there any non-academic mental health newsletters that people subscribe to? Looking for something more personal and anectdotal. I've read several academically focused ones, but I'd like to read more and learn more from people with real life stories.",9.007857142857144,11.345077404761913,8.131904761904764,61.69642857142858,60.66666666666667,11.314285714285715,40.19047619047619,11.20814326018867,5.524847619047621,209,11,27,6,3,65,35,42,0.0,0.88,0.12,0.6187,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,6,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,5,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,15,1,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794454370734936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28048895586183753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863841583116584,0.12891699362189893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22159025588220327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265925993473489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788099126356451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3658782309692238,0.2304072545852709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5278969011152813,0.3003498434712213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981059474876128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031454385531052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dudeinblu201,2020/04/08,Im just looking for someone to talk to. I hit a rough patch in my life and im only going to message with one person. I tried to talk to someone who posted on here previously but they practically ghosted me. If anyone here is willing to talk to me please let me know. I apologize for not being willing to talk to more people but i dont think i could handle it.,0.7965789473684204,2.9020873421052684,3.4860526315789464,86.98986842105263,83.47368421052632,5.378947368421053,22.657894736842106,6.6274283507984215,0.6882684210526309,282,10,58,3,8,99,51,76,0.0,0.935,0.065,0.5499,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,0,0,10,12,4,1,2,5,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,10,0,14,6,1,4,0,0,1,0,9,2,0,1,0,44,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092068213924826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14949375811258533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21944073536842348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10641127938008646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4044968544109808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10290073007859928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19146283738883307,0.13225125083632627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15723218528347382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687684845219546,0.14240241312608182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12980677686821268,0.163488398889102,0.0,0.2055303424305263,0.0,0.0,0.1793215878656384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172911339523773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6019770363296099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997410931406728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12712184436951726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,g-x91,2020/04/08,"Looking for Podcast Guests - Depression Hey guys, 

hope you are all safe and healthy! As the title already tells you, I am looking for potential guests in my podcasts who have knowledge in the field of depression and are trained to help people. The goal of the podcast is to raise awareness and help other people who might find this podcast useful.

In general, I do podcasts about engineering, AI & Neuroscience but these topics have a huge connection with depression and it is a very common state which I also noticed around me while studying. If you know someone who might be a fit or you want to be in the podcast, please feel free to reach out to me!

My podcast will be uploaded here:  [https://www.youtube.com/user/TheEngiineer/](https://www.youtube.com/user/TheEngiineer/) 

Stay strong friends!",11.40523446019629,11.92768258778626,8.012388222464558,70.94992366412215,55.18320610687022,10.539149400218102,40.08833151581243,9.957137785484203,4.057082006543077,653,28,98,10,7,181,87,131,0.063,0.698,0.239,0.973,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,4,0,2,4,8,0,0,8,0,14,0,0,1,1,22,21,10,0,3,3,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,8,7,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,11,6,18,15,1,12,0,3,2,0,15,8,0,5,2,70,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938914074888264,0.14050873996069038,0.0,0.19037292712682344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641193529807013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.453995347680391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884015610409736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16058834664573138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13574684630563286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17397249739682802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23553854982467165,0.0,0.0,0.1745116240030864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656116512189587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950906761115705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3727838840259872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000377691666368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436191386696369,0.0,0.0,0.19286791568762024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887164334930705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18727483953470067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357119842790545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15175002199822096,0.0,0.14497246231129765,0.10363352848130583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reteppi0008,2020/04/08,"Always longing for the past? So this doesn’t have a *huge* impact on my life but it’s very annoying and idk what it is or why I have it.

Basically as I’ve gotten older (and I’m only 18) I have started thinking more about the past (not just during my life but back in previous centuries) and i feel so empty inside. Like I think about how happy I used to be, and other, recent eras and as things in my life have changed (moving schools, people dying whether I know them or not, people I’m used to seeing retiring/dying) it makes me sad. The thing is though, I think it’s that I just only like the first way I saw things.

For example I’m like this with tv series. Even if I’m watching a tv show set in the 1920s, after the first season or two as the show shifts I get the same feeling I have with my life. I feel like we’re in a future time where things are uncertain and everything has changed. I’m a big sports fan and my favorite times watching sports are entirely the first 2-3 years I watched a given sport. Since then I still enjoy it but because players, teams etc have changed I feel a bit empty. I constantly think about my family’s old house, the things I used to do there etc. the house we live in now is fine, my family is happy and all that but bc the other house is where my memories are from I feel like I could only be happy there for some reason?

I’m not a depressed person at all but to me these thoughts stop me from being happy. And I don’t see when it’ll go away, as time passes I’ll just be further from the times I “enjoyed” and as my grandparents pass away, I fall further from contact with old friends, etc. The only thing I feel like could stop it is if I have kids where I’m now seeing life through a new perspective but other than that idk

Does anyone else get what I’m talking about? Because I really don’t think it’s just a nostalgia thing, I feel like this with everything",3.083874085684428,4.111588214646467,4.217335423197493,89.1477272727273,73.41919191919192,7.17924068268896,23.756182514803204,7.503015589744147,0.8734731104144902,1487,40,324,17,29,486,173,396,0.068,0.759,0.174,0.9938,1,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,1,0,1,4,23,19,1,1,23,0,28,5,0,6,2,63,64,33,1,4,19,0,7,7,1,1,5,0,0,2,28,15,0,2,15,8,0,5,6,4,0,4,4,14,40,15,36,53,9,53,0,2,7,0,8,16,0,7,37,211,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05662087210179675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04758031093171588,0.06972258323762028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786550874663904,0.05232423562656688,0.0,0.08296210365274506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07429011586629522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21595531881256774,0.0,0.0,0.07353504451817193,0.0,0.10866059322517334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058609109490421224,0.0,0.070622438116897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059548721621366874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056844855123836885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22767245177339224,0.0449446533388978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223131965318377,0.0,0.12829802937158666,0.0,0.24084760277819264,0.1944522501522306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17364320238952913,0.0,0.0,0.052573237713267336,0.0,0.0711038959752425,0.0,0.03867289473912967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897508093742993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23555262415589584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0373970609703427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24031938778045564,0.2327115918396337,0.0,0.060087084053374075,0.06021979080323728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04542215517216519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232359693508415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572058453923411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280855898410968,0.0,0.0,0.20701239814070335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299178496524402,0.09435097195513112,0.05941634832453933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04359289468115369,0.0699640408787505,0.06718857937829795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886758238474879,0.16267485744855814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05628949669349817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816428646530998,0.0,0.054342726316847084,0.11378131484706695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054693907208357546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164535936922272,0.21801007035876452,0.066856206275392,0.05402201949794064,0.1587159001881327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06647240350449206,0.0,0.0,0.17631326686316476,0.0,0.0561462157714472,0.0,0.05401284364309539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06140217720279938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043820282302547836
mentalhealth,ShawtyLikeChungus,2020/04/08,"i’m currently on orders helping and supporting with covid19. I’m losing my mind i’m in the Army currently supporting this pandemic. i’ve been out here for almost a month and will be here for at least another month. my first 2 weeks out here i was doing security at a testing site and where patients were being held. it wasn’t too bad. only thing that i really had to deal with was one patient attempting to kill herself.

now for the past few weeks i’ve been at a huge convention center that was transformed into a hospital to hold patients. seeing these patients come in has really been fucking with me. yesterday i watched an old man take his last breath as they were taking him out the ambulance. this whole situation has me beyond stressed. i’m working 12-15 hours day, 7 days a week, 0 days off. i’m not sleeping well so i’m only getting about 3 hours of rest a night. i’m starting to push my girlfriend away unintentionally, barely even talking to her. i haven’t talked to my family in about 2 weeks. i just have no desire to talk to anyone. i don’t feel like myself right now.

I was finally getting my first day off today after a month. Then get a call 10 minutes ago telling me I know have to work the night shift from 6pm to 7am. so now i have to work a 13 hour shift on 2 hours of sleep. i just don’t even know what to do anymore.",2.402693939393941,4.217042498181819,3.9827499999999993,86.91679166666668,76.74545454545455,7.201515151515152,24.91287878787879,8.07648339933343,1.424542424242424,1057,37,221,18,24,352,158,275,0.067,0.863,0.07,-0.0808,2,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,7,19,10,2,1,14,0,24,4,3,0,0,22,46,7,1,1,3,0,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,8,11,0,3,3,0,0,2,6,5,1,3,12,3,24,5,41,31,4,58,1,1,2,1,14,21,1,1,35,139,32,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675548136785367,0.0,0.09800225144283572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262479254328392,0.0,0.0,0.0970603292823614,0.06843268892272507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195169611819493,0.0,0.08171701487402168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09993578804433274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430598090796831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524711412954674,0.10089924397277912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292838747983185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922627339067266,0.0,0.0494858024733255,0.06991805057815137,0.0,0.10721134577157393,0.0,0.1664956368152918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090478853634538,0.15339845513359587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655999193530214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3855273048304075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10827819444106516,0.0,0.10757312803947053,0.07977677368272781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047814135304617436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949103075994476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988203806592109,0.0,0.2343557053704104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836879499934522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269766528520016,0.0,0.066318963205447,0.14886845806284002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934275923872592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539552359116646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358009024063777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798938746814928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11000951332640677,0.19588052908373266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927259549849925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11210927814717968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22212248890989614,0.0,0.0,0.14717149474492205,0.2359915938756316,0.08554233045347727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06502020301962283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09276892232490218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140203084879037,0.0,0.08799650994895998,0.0,0.0,0.10926789574497994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21375066897140196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,McLoboutin,2020/04/08,"Advice about neighbour My roommates and I live above a 30 y/o guy who seems to be having a very rough time since the self-isolation began. 

He sounds like he's smashing things and slamming doors for hours on end, and yelling the f word at the top of his lungs. I don't want to call the police or file a complaint since he seems to just be having a rough time. 

The thing is someone had to call the police about 6 months ago because he had been yelling 'let me die' while smashing things. He was taken away in an ambulance and a police escort, and later that week we saw several hospital bills in our shared mailbox. 

He keeps to himself and I don't feel comfortable addressing him directly, but I also don't want to get him in trouble or evicted. Any advice on what we should do or who we should contact?",5.1381987577639725,5.479151795031059,5.347385093167702,85.40033229813666,68.3167701863354,8.17913043478261,29.764596273291932,7.908726449838941,1.8104603726708075,633,22,129,7,10,200,103,161,0.078,0.89,0.032,-0.7223,1,1,0,0,2,0,12.0,4,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,12,0,16,1,1,0,0,23,26,12,1,4,5,0,3,1,1,2,0,3,3,1,7,9,0,1,3,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,7,7,14,3,17,14,0,18,0,0,1,0,22,8,0,5,11,79,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250674555066231,0.14743967389685286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13301238517191968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113108695724636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15627056499686132,0.0,0.0,0.10139196205625246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3396788253045447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17262213108385974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731717684004866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410039877773882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689947825997496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469080029855515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16379950640095828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14783990609456046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700815770312388,0.0,0.08125942483197364,0.0,0.14687060906534696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327613665092044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3028374004520931,0.17351630529865056,0.18790321703343751,0.0,0.2751763642253722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092911495679594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315026570807278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19397430659373874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723796115221518,0.1962090445183269,0.0,0.13341823234238107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,clandestinefeather,2020/04/08,"Struggling with my thoughts Has anyone else become so dependent on another person where if you aren't with them and they're doing something without you it feels like everything is falling apart? I, 17 female, consciously know that they are allowed to do things without me and that they have a life away from me, but in my head it feels like I did something horribly wrong and it's more of a punishment when I know it's most likely not. It's like the only time I can feel happy is with this person, but I want to feel happy even without them. This isn't even the first time this has happened. I've clung to other people before this one, when they left it felt like they hated me and it took months or years to get over, and yet I was still around them because I had nowhere to go. I'm still scared of telling these people how I feel and that I'll hurt or offend them with how I feel so much so that they'll abandon me. I don't want to hurt them and I surely don't want to be alone, but I feel like I should. Opening up to people just sends me into a panic making me believe I screwed up by letting them know me and that they'll leave me.

I also kind of don't feel like my own person. I feel like I am just a husk that takes on a form that refuses to change just to please other people. I have such little identity and I don't know what I like or what to do. Been told CBT and to ignore my thoughts but I don't have access to therapy at the moment and my thoughts get so overwhelming and obsessive that I can't ignore them at all. How do you people manage to ignore thoughts or get through a day where you feel alone if you do?",3.984569377990432,4.319573108187136,4.653429027113237,89.38794258373207,70.84210526315789,7.504731525784157,25.19457735247209,7.1686216300943375,0.8826210526315791,1281,33,284,11,22,411,151,342,0.18600000000000005,0.6940000000000001,0.121,-0.9813,1,2,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,5,13,1,22,29,4,5,9,0,32,3,1,6,2,74,65,32,0,6,17,0,11,9,0,3,1,0,0,3,25,19,0,5,20,0,0,4,12,16,0,2,11,11,53,13,38,49,6,33,0,4,0,1,25,17,1,8,21,207,78,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16165466922766586,0.0,0.062409664149117236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183319247808946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05456834811183321,0.07996261728568584,0.0,0.06947337477794607,0.0,0.0,0.0733224463664894,0.0,0.0,0.047573301472430315,0.08619057385795698,0.06640746716805251,0.08792591175871728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255743312591496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050330234509562935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519355973137593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030911921816731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07013856105941689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.394600670888019,0.2787638907158549,0.07493196423359308,0.0,0.0,0.0663819587675235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232020151947808,0.0,0.04435271525748743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901173543733477,0.16615300238698955,0.0,0.07704970672985921,0.08009297179233578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16708982479167514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126808892683343,0.1715580080439393,0.0,0.0,0.08263455413884671,0.08479218874678339,0.0798025994853952,0.055122935321909296,0.34314369038215536,0.07821796591702596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05209322778452532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0622918857150641,0.0,0.0573693945536892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05288285945766662,0.05935398689081212,0.0,0.09156474558845354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705203361179325,0.20442817094409904,0.0,0.08566600089483498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813303675865138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201601356224627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12464789527161887,0.0,0.0,0.08158579596804408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355307796236236,0.0,0.05867740610374321,0.0,0.06821160676228674,0.0,0.08924712048865223,0.0,0.05184722577076194,0.0,0.0,0.2478245566657592,0.09101311364671934,0.0,0.0,0.07457188388640963,0.0867068457488306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809248539804128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256873189641782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532599892619988,0.0,0.05025609064379439
mentalhealth,toiletgurl,2020/04/08,"23 (f) Sometimes I feel like I don't deserve happiness I never do anything with bad intentions but I've made several mistakes and I've probably hurt people. I'm in a happy relationship but sometimes I can't help but thinking that maybe I don't deserve it. I scared of karma and I'm scared of ruining it. And yes, I'm recovering from several mental health issues, although I am much better now. I want to bring positivity  into my life.",1.212403100775191,3.8636237674418616,4.21895348837209,77.57943798449612,90.3953488372093,7.0527131782945744,26.93410852713179,8.07648339933343,2.59268527131783,348,17,61,9,12,124,57,86,0.177,0.557,0.266,0.8711,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,1,10,0,2,1,1,5,2,0,2,1,15,13,7,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,1,1,9,4,7,12,1,5,1,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,35,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440294260913738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14613731030250365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15479406106857385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08849713958300474,0.12503682212128506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3726315368721079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604179417219605,0.0,0.0,0.11731456154010025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18736627479892165,0.0,0.0,0.1826790596407774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236242728738874,0.08550764046666272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16561146593547613,0.0,0.0,0.17583462874940445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638252027007095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286624096757068,0.0,0.13498891170695862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213392561730534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18870493360392834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879097364049966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3504581096891568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3954534691292185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34620543021740197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214799053960954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323339397043717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,essTee38,2020/04/08,Annoying colleague impacting my mental health We started working from home due to the virus. There is one guy at work with a very high sense of entitlement who wants things done right there and then everytime he asks for a favour and won’t take no for an answer (and never says please - I’m British so please is quite common - he also rarely says thanks). Even my boss never ‘demands’ things like that. This behaviour annoys me so much and has started to impact my mood and ruin my day when he ‘bugs’ me which is at least every other day if I’m lucky. I have tried to raise above and have read through online articles/threads which suggest I should avoid such toxic colleagues. However this is not possible as he keeps asking me for favours...any advice?,3.4764989939637796,6.043766267605637,3.4065593561368215,88.70478873239439,76.46478873239437,6.310663983903421,23.523138832997986,7.447530270364453,1.0672941649899397,598,19,112,8,14,181,105,142,0.133,0.8290000000000001,0.038,-0.9008,1,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,3,8,9,2,1,4,0,10,1,0,1,2,19,20,13,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,2,1,1,9,8,0,2,1,1,0,0,5,4,0,1,1,2,10,4,13,17,2,14,0,1,0,0,12,4,0,2,11,69,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579911107491165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750099107547613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10842201487858204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981024612671335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20564618856777406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16315848470218433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10530603996610052,0.0,0.1343317901544095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578668048989475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694731180780869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16845299264949065,0.15992740730806576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171413077961376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789242473103955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16067408840925734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720387800066155,0.0,0.2459338975388661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803802718193256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500259187252358,0.0,0.17974024634240862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957991707329528,0.15947924505775252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361575577307088,0.0,0.2535799710547458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22569938351554894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198761046701014,0.0,0.0,0.14678733939816258,0.0,0.0,0.21184451992855724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10824664582196007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155147949169424,0.09403954226414482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23214275845405935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mediocre-ramen,2020/04/08,"How do you support a new partner with their mental health? Hi all, I recently entered a relationship and I want to know how I can best support my partner. We've only known each other for a few months but they have since opened up to me that they are taking anti-depressants. With everything being new between us, I want to be respectful and didn't want to pry - so I don't know much about their diagnosis. However, I would really like for them to be comfortable with discussing their mental health with me (when they're ready) and I want to be as supportive as possible.

How do I support my partner, considering that we are only in the early stages of our relationship?

What are the important things for me to know about their diagnosis? What's the best way to have this conversation? Should I even ask?

I really like this person, and I want to be there for them and be as supportive as possible. I don't have any experience at all with mental health issues - so I really appreciate the help. Thanks!",4.491797556719021,6.287743869109949,5.685947643979057,76.97663525305413,71.04188481675392,9.700663176265273,27.39301919720768,10.047579312681364,2.850348411867364,793,28,148,22,15,264,97,191,0.0,0.713,0.287,0.9953,1,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,3,1,8,2,10,12,0,0,7,0,20,3,0,3,2,30,36,16,0,7,1,0,0,2,3,2,3,0,0,4,8,13,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,30,12,29,27,7,13,0,0,0,0,23,4,0,0,8,115,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747781295531438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927639195113137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082653846594088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546413342969464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06553854653831094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917889590455126,0.09706311854600744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31642121875617585,0.0,0.0,0.06650981607929585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356728524356074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16359781456004635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695467239790756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999926563785135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079202103778205,0.0,0.07294331659693608,0.0,0.0,0.19166825276731447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15093332222689426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664125364238062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22372723356630905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907022133594596,0.0,0.09797476472282804,0.21306548554133747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208166098974297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5630085383554742,0.0,0.0,0.07460641067959628,0.0,0.0,0.09135495815319053,0.0,0.0,0.06592205885195823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935795250393873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926334956239993,0.07876183269403167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048806639945566,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,apro447,2020/04/08,"feeling great Hey all, I don’t really post much or like talking about my mental health, but today I feel pretty good and I really wanted to share. With the quarantine, my anxiety and body dysmorphia has been surprisingly steady, not great but not as worse as it’s been. I was scared of gaining weight and hurting my weight loss, but sense this all started I finally hit 80 lbs lost and feel good. I also have regular existential deep thoughts, but lately I’ve found my own peace with it, and have been feeling great. Today I feel my anxiety, but it’s almost accompanied by a good refreshing feeling. This isn’t something that I always feel, but for some reason I can’t stop fighting the urge to just smile and be happy. I’m not sure if anyone would really care, but I just really felt like sharing how I’m doing. :-)",5.009159953970077,6.179725531645572,5.844729574223247,78.74198504027622,69.0,9.289758342922902,27.65477560414269,9.573946990214177,2.460777215189873,646,21,121,14,11,212,97,158,0.122,0.514,0.364,0.995,0,1,1,0,2,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,5,19,1,1,3,0,13,4,1,2,3,42,30,19,0,3,14,0,10,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,6,8,2,1,11,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,8,10,15,14,10,19,5,8,0,3,0,0,5,1,0,4,8,74,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570671216025072,0.0,0.0,0.09240535580315487,0.09614692160043248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17679098712328248,0.0,0.0,0.08079530136256446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835008799876774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11781100575139615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4089791400657736,0.0,0.11094619576049077,0.12657946264367653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12669469661392455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907537701166299,0.0,0.3821831074860295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300520690712112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282432977956535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369874859501186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13034552123607926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290386311399565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613656013126562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644730117443555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494260285200092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110665033940229,0.11755597054980968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2960973557390184,0.11880472524557276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568578616948512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08895609547761094,0.0,0.0,0.08178694009508164,0.0,0.0,0.09660503937953227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890458124065104,0.0,0.0,0.09287477591176856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173385503542447,0.0,0.0,0.21905592646767308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06815442993176493,0.0,0.0,0.28141773179232976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775540142262406,0.08208346027175205,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thegreatkind,2020/04/08,"Wearing the same clothes everyday has really positively impacted my mental health, especially as a women - do any of you do this? Hey guys! I wanted to share an experiment I’ve tried for the past 6 months. It has helped me gain a new perspective on myself by improving my relationship with what I look like, reducing decision fatigue and overall reducing my impact on the world. I know wearing the same clothes everyday is not a new concept but I haven’t seen many women do it, so I gave it a try! It’s been a HUGE help in bettering my mental health. 

Here is my short summary of the experience [Why I Wear The Same Clothes To Work Everyday](https://youtu.be/BaH_uIoAe0k) would love to hear if you would do this or if any of you already are and how it has affected your mental health! Cheers 😄

Edit: apologies for the typo in the title *woman*",4.532554426705367,6.556840842767301,5.581257861635223,76.83208998548625,71.38993710691823,9.420609579100145,29.84083212385099,9.851270322608157,3.135519206579584,670,28,122,18,13,221,101,159,0.021,0.8059999999999999,0.174,0.9772,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,4,0,3,3,6,0,0,14,0,14,8,3,2,0,18,21,9,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,2,4,1,0,4,8,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,3,17,5,15,16,3,13,0,1,2,1,17,7,0,3,7,81,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161794819141603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19940832967091632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967027182479365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868379026262605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14517326536790906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4675390616645296,0.16524731393484485,0.0,0.19654773547380816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057652708462565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07162935648737181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312083137205633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13232700557076754,0.0,0.0,0.1486459950989954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4432644739211957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702779424174095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2832060232937872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996192293824852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392620617322872,0.0,0.0,0.15741112049103065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990857932312817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647813853538258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229847656637947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673846948971302,0.0,0.0,0.20830413682429652,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,controlscourtnsenate,2020/04/08,"Im losing grip of reality and no one seems to fucking care What started 5 years ago as anxiety is now developing into having full blown hallucinations while locked in my room.

Im not going to give much information about them, but the shit i see and think is insane.

I havent laughed sincerely in months because im secretly so worried about shit i shouldnt be.

My days are mostly composed of me just daydreaming and imagining shit, i'm in love with a girl, and most of the dreams include her.

Most also include violence, and i know it sounds like an edgy teenager's dream or something, but its much more suffocating. Because my mind tells me these imaginations are going to come true one day. And deep inside i know they aren't and its suffocating.

 My family doesn't give a fuck that i look like a dead body while awake, i've also stopped believing in all forms of religion and i feel truly alone.

Oh shit.",4.157191283292981,5.909875118644072,5.207380952380955,80.24656779661018,71.82485875706216,8.672962066182405,27.89709443099273,9.23628265651192,2.3800721549636803,724,27,140,16,14,238,119,177,0.16,0.595,0.245,0.9745,0,1,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,1,7,14,6,0,6,0,10,8,5,0,2,33,28,17,1,1,5,0,2,2,0,1,0,1,1,1,6,11,0,1,9,2,0,3,6,7,0,2,0,5,16,7,16,26,9,21,0,1,2,3,10,8,6,5,12,85,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928031713389204,0.0,0.0,0.12768094208535138,0.0,0.19717400683471065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430889313823518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15030073623313034,0.0,0.0,0.1388943888933482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13693633290160825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256922169247079,0.0,0.0,0.10619483846608453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901085414383725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621745003311044,0.0,0.06233409235527523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2279408208726058,0.0,0.236522895460048,0.14012577539950594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3994907943584512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550297182252782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120456800819678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352418469619784,0.1379188309039465,0.0,0.0,0.11126504923936126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447769717213512,0.0,0.09840095173707797,0.0,0.18125002830979545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670754911808396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09823823072873107,0.1122295183064516,0.0,0.0,0.5061807577547863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09490699768017552,0.0,0.0,0.08725824680362908,0.0,0.0,0.1030676335225856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775218871406117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07899287177748575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251968647364428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938830384032369
mentalhealth,dixiecup3,2020/04/08,"I made a powerpoint about my life and mental health issues I'm feeling kind of alone right now and I could just use someone to vent to. I was just going to make a long post, but then I was browsing r/Needafriend and I saw how people were making PowerPoints about themselves in that sub.

Well, I have a bit too much time on my hands because of the quarantine so I decided to make one summarizing my life story and the issues I'm struggling with at the moment. I know it's silly, but it was honestly really cathartic to make, and I thought it might be more interesting to read than a long post.

Honestly, it's pretty boring so I really don't expect anyone to look at it. But I thought I'd post it anyway in case anyone else sees this and decides to make one. It helped me organized my thoughts a bit more than if I was just writing a bunch of paragraphs. If anyone is bored and wants to look at it, I would really appreciate any thoughts you have, just please be nice. I'm not necessarily looking for advice, but I'm open to it. I really just wanted to get all of this out of my head.

[https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1kfbfINc6m175XDyFG2FkAKqVsq9jqO3ehpzc3kmRH5U/edit?usp=sharing](https://docs.google.com/presentation/d/1kfbfINc6m175XDyFG2FkAKqVsq9jqO3ehpzc3kmRH5U/edit?usp=sharing)

(also, I'm sorry there are literally no colors or anything interesting. Maybe I'll add some later, but for now I don't really have the energy).",7.909221176470583,9.634405427999999,7.090094117647059,70.42292941176471,62.72,9.08235294117647,27.105882352941176,9.325443323948027,2.1764235294117653,1167,31,196,20,17,359,136,250,0.06,0.7959999999999999,0.145,0.9728,2,2,0,0,0,0,51.0,0,1,0,0,17,11,0,1,10,0,17,5,2,8,1,50,44,20,0,7,14,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,12,11,0,0,8,1,0,1,4,3,1,2,11,8,22,8,30,28,8,21,0,0,6,0,3,9,0,5,8,132,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10050353591575177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652127073172242,0.0,0.08224886745141098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994132245830548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157447035847944,0.10538167125020982,0.08463653924367165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269622213769406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245704678118616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211711601449569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591772646332094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05200389830421095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053734722971574375,0.0,0.05845185434113344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055534637231436,0.109324420993171,0.0,0.0,0.06893798552903838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21469672996509567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071021349866878,0.05652350503809614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529156862602818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18203749495497776,0.25910353241127193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09731887237374344,0.3432648649517038,0.0,0.1033263469862338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364830648748703,0.10910727785991646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07560636309690548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938723616883109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0713030315789312,0.0,0.0,0.11289808475585908,0.0,0.0,0.2955047452264136,0.10463511942392367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028775319890759,0.0,0.3294407552627531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08783308132618048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08195789442613415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714421654152255,0.0,0.0,0.11513181804911406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752083687648613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32660469160199823,0.05997248681537014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888291180219267,0.0,0.0,0.12132683489960275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924742315127234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306147555155018,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hellisinbetween,2020/04/08,"Anhedonia without depression Does anyone here have experience of anhedonia without depression or other mental illnesses? By anhedonia I mean a loss of joy and pleasure. If so, for how long, what do you think caused it, and, if you feel better now, how did you overcome it? I’ve been struggling with this for years now and have come to realise that if I don’t learn how to love life again, life itself isn’t worth living. 

Though I had a mildly depressive phase in the last winter months (sadness, lack of motivation and fatigue), it’s ended now and I don’t have any other symptoms of depression — I am still motivated and inquisitive, have enough energy to exercise, dance, read and learn languages, have a healthy appetite and a great deal of hope. Most importantly, I have absolutely no desire to end my life. 

However, I have not enjoyed anything for years and don’t remember the last time I felt joy. The only feelings I feel with some intensity are negative ones — loneliness, sadness, disappointment. There is no longer any joy or wonder in my life — I feel so empty and don’t understand why. 

How on earth can I change this? I’m in perfect health and have a life most people would be delighted with. It’s frustrating because I realise now that for the past few years, the driving factors for almost all my decisions have been either distraction from this joylessness, or desire for a spiritual remedy — not true enjoyment or a sense of meaningfulness. It’s a realisation which has dampened my enjoyment of life even more. If anyone knows what might be wrong, I would be so grateful for your advice!",8.309315068493152,8.312391541095892,8.378869863013701,67.49549657534246,61.67123287671233,11.957534246575339,37.08561643835617,11.45678717892309,4.453557534246577,1278,55,216,34,16,417,160,292,0.163,0.629,0.20800000000000002,0.9572,1,0,0,0,0,1,35.0,0,4,0,5,17,26,1,2,13,0,30,12,0,7,3,64,44,27,0,10,13,0,5,0,0,3,11,0,0,0,16,15,0,0,17,3,1,3,12,13,0,1,5,5,21,13,29,33,9,25,0,9,0,1,6,4,0,15,18,160,37,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10393791829271333,0.0,0.0,0.1065084364012288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466268062547485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14874471940356562,0.0,0.0875287184707701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06483866218669154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407053933286393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092653885529913,0.1125192776573158,0.09162338694858596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10965687574917883,0.3664455055014989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308007571790608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884143174609764,0.10990270765391362,0.0,0.07025258682293138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404465040999683,0.0,0.0,0.21512385145838453,0.0,0.1021263642747768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11726696586948625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130602285088907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564370417081577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058455012500178476,0.17340212701211755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45076931027972295,0.0,0.0,0.09392158523432408,0.09412901797157214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09599789224753408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11586185468720495,0.0,0.0,0.1071901511993082,0.11283566521331714,0.0,0.0,0.08489893301165306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07207517144524901,0.08089480835541611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153671609986024,0.07373958142613149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639303798226557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204899656547722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494263088386125,0.0,0.0,0.11119501275457963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055318636794216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681539193579553,0.10450233981332938,0.0,0.062021852043613664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072893986785574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09597719560834568,0.0,0.0,0.20506269106449307,0.11534749659788425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511162290367123,0.1162926147415695,0.0,0.20548527744906173
mentalhealth,xhaythemx,2020/04/08,"Ex-fat person, how to be healthy again ? Hi everyone ! I hope you’re staying safe and in good health (mentally and physically!!) during these crazy times ☺️ and sorry if this is not the suitable subreddit, and i will be happy if someone redirect me to a better one also please i want people with experience . Thank you;

I lost around 35kgs over 6 years and the fact that it was a long term process reassured me that I wasn’t falling into the diet “trap” and it was just me living a new “lifestyle” that was better for me health.

I was completely blinded to how wrong many of the small habits I picked up along the way like banning any oils and carbs (I didn’t eat pasta rice even pizza for 6 years!!!!) and I convinced myself it was for my best to eat salads while I watched others enjoy my cravings! This is the worst one: I started cooking everything I restricted myself to eat for my family and friends!! I mastered the art of making perfect pizza’s pasta dishes and risottos but never even tasted them! I would literally just smell them!! It makes me so sad to even write this because it’s sinking in as I recall these habits!  Then the flexible diet came along and I was ecstatic because it meant I can eat everything I wanted as long as I don’t go over the macro limit some stupid website assigned me which sounds Ludacris to me now looking back at it!

That’s when binge eating started, obviously reintroducing these restricted foods that I couldn’t eat for so many years was going to result in the cycle of late night binging and then guilt trip calorie restriction for the next days until I get bad cravings again and restart the cycle! It’s crazy and I feel trapped because some days after binging I feel worthless and some days I have to tell myself that I have to move on and forget about it but it’s always there in the back of my head unconsciously controlling me to not to add cheese or reduce my portion size


I still feel stuck and I’m aware that I am but I have no idea how to escape this toxic disorder and even worse I’m so scared to escape it! I know I wrote way tooo much I’m so sorry for that but I just feel hopeless I don’t know who to ask because everyone around me seems to just eating without really thinking about it and I envy that! I want to be normal but I just don’t know how. I wanted to ask how to start to break this toxic disorder what were the first steps because for me although I’m aware and I accepted that i have it I’m too scared to stop and I don’t even know how or where to start


I feel the scariest part is losing that extreme control I had over what and how much I can eat to satisfy the ED. I test it sometimes like I would add some olive oil or not weigh how much I serve myself and my brain truly can’t handle it, a lot of thoughts just surge in and overwhelm my head like “this isn’t allowed” “you were doing so well why mess up” “its just a test, only this once and we’ll get back on track tomorrow”..etc and i either not eat what I plated or have half and leave the rest regardless of my satiety level. I don’t understand how it works but the control feels sort of comforting in a way it’s so confusing. what makes it worse is comments I get mainly from family members on how I look like and my weight loss, they completely fuel the ED and in a way justify it making it so much harder to recover.


And omg the scales!! I’m trying not to weigh myself like before, I used to weigh myself every morning but now I have to resist the urge to do that which to be fair is easy because I’m just scared to see my new weight. The fear of losing control really stems from letting go of that power and going back to point zero 6 years ago where I was 30+ kg heavier.

I was very unhappy at that weight and I compared myself a looot to my friends I just felt worthless compared to them like I didn’t deserve to be loved because how “ugly” and “unhealthy” my body was! And that’s scary to go back to

At the moment I reached a point where I really want to break free from this restriction I have over myself, it truly is toxic not only to my mental health but it’s impacted my social life, my studies and career too! I can’t sit and study for longer than an hour without the fear of sitting for too long creeps in and I need to break out some burpees or jumping jacks to not feel like crap! Going over to friends houses freaks me out since I’ll be served food I have no control
Over and that we might be sitting down for “too” long! I haven’t had more than two periods a year since 2015 and my mom is  worried sick she took me to so many doctors and because Im able to hide my disordered habits from my family and my BMI is considered “normal” I was never diagnosed with an ED and they dismissed the amenorrhea and blamed it on lazy ovaries. I was prescribed contraceptive pills and I refused to take them because they might increase my appetite!

I spoke about it once to a close friend and I was literally told “omg just eat who cares!” Those words hurt and they make it harder because they don’t understand what I’m going through..they don’t understand that I care even though I don’t want to care I’m trapped and I want to escape it. I don’t want to talk about it with anyone anymore  because for me it’s embarrassing, like the most simple silly thing in life is my worst enemy",3.640672541743971,4.890172248608536,4.530185064935067,86.58384902597406,72.3395176252319,7.3566048237476815,25.905426716141,7.778938585908118,1.3328715769944337,4196,134,860,53,80,1358,414,1078,0.16699999999999998,0.708,0.125,-0.9961,3,2,0,0,0,1,60.0,2,2,9,18,63,59,2,9,39,0,70,44,5,25,5,188,146,92,0,18,35,1,11,8,4,6,10,2,0,1,69,62,28,14,21,2,1,15,30,26,1,6,30,22,129,34,122,101,22,111,0,10,5,1,36,38,1,20,55,587,198,6,0.04074980036061604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036122239317425774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03258760062588728,0.0339070982984778,0.0,0.0,0.02771126161541522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04041285215973375,0.028493207892194113,0.0,0.0,0.07255192356065003,0.07619112503695571,0.0,0.0,0.15667040571125515,0.034024381180816216,0.2732477008124494,0.0,0.03467507874226923,0.0,0.042764401415572466,0.07207977384312743,0.0,0.045263841815741696,0.0,0.0454902539705636,0.0,0.0466069157418617,0.124641411898428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545078076141999,0.0,0.2285218306514317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884075025717402,0.0,0.0,0.041360189589466384,0.0,0.0,0.14010840483121215,0.0417091473859788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4169721896772281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0454467991253405,0.16148915290599952,0.0,0.034333464328297154,0.07787636107779725,0.07324658600365233,0.039861124026318,0.11524585542189135,0.09170970904912,0.14423026419781632,0.029111665519819207,0.039126198768242214,0.0,0.0,0.03466175936969484,0.09854964069572203,0.0,0.12593277869744635,0.0,0.06387026640730904,0.0,0.16211335437119145,0.034178999181301725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0433789202233345,0.0,0.0,0.08364210297536143,0.1299453967102877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04047374639597929,0.04013034493301281,0.047019798443225264,0.043623504093457034,0.046001564524388125,0.04401677709031539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08958009831539415,0.0,0.04596754974314418,0.0431481547752102,0.0,0.04166943175217328,0.057565578218943314,0.15926635283419882,0.0,0.035982820289375245,0.14424916399084153,0.06843913840688652,0.09117720641655863,0.044483220806348124,0.034644023039944766,0.036778285803884064,0.0,0.13600404084048398,0.12394170489477112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08213242861633703,0.08645819709012115,0.0,0.04772567367863791,0.0,0.04331058882612245,0.11982316798870454,0.03021546062855128,0.06285751636722738,0.07871282223272284,0.043337874979920914,0.03824092717125669,0.07985230470312278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679441490888702,0.055226238674951814,0.061984118861158566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04412806275149106,0.0,0.028250780691684494,0.03558115388181775,0.0,0.04473104386057286,0.07704346568053752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783160967078515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223929770633792,0.0,0.03247231499297289,0.037097087792836984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741731191023875,0.0,0.0,0.04153928972428215,0.03452717360744958,0.0,0.040302594526346464,0.09123213053683174,0.11537167373326175,0.043433865250953926,0.03254284320665099,0.03406865775674909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0306387784959556,0.03275314595485988,0.03561712163533432,0.03751694126371345,0.0,0.0,0.027072356661635703,0.026110826666260828,0.04003647195626805,0.032350789689458564,0.023761536291489024,0.0,0.0,0.038938180538898616,0.045274527580249295,0.02766643955771096,0.0,0.03980663377474488,0.12726593788289242,0.0,0.03519474385174278,0.0,0.033622852961842545,0.192282304348904,0.1293811791167117,0.0,0.14886683633728945,0.03663896437847878,0.0,0.03677035659946686,0.0,0.0,0.07856270677523379,0.0,0.0296663399903084,0.0413834003085868,0.08305505584061605,0.0578949780145842,0.04455350968350338,0.0,0.1312076769877576
mentalhealth,qwermor,2020/04/08,"I am unable to stop procrastinating and I feel more stressed than I ever before. Ok so this is my first post here, and I don't really know much about mental health, but I just need to get this out there.

I will start with my current situation: I am an eleventh-grade student in Germany, and here (or just my state I am not sure) you are required to write a complex paper before you can graduate. While this project is quite important in most schools, mine requires us to work together with an Institute or Business to write a ""proper"" scientific paper, which, at least in formalities, should equal something a college student could do.

As it is normal in my School I found a really kind supervisor and he helped me for the last few months, but the problem I currently have has also started getting worse over this time.

I do not know why, but I just can't work on that project. I love the subject. My supervisor is great. I love the idea of doing it. But I am not. In the beginning, it took me ages to respond to mails, or do my stuff, but I did it, and while I was definitely rude, it was ok. After winter break, there was Project week, where we students would work solely on our projects at the place our Supervisor works at, and I made progress, but now I feel stuck. I have to work on the PC for it anyways, so corona is no reason for me not to work, but I procrastinate all the time and I don't understand why. All the other Homework we get from school, I am able to do, and that is stuff I like way less. Yet, It feels like my body is physically unable to do this project.

The due date is coming up in a few weeks, and I feel terribly stressed, yet I do nothing. Whenever my supervisor sends an Email, I get so stressed I sometimes need days just to open it. Today I got an email from my school asking if everything is alright since my Supervisor send them a really concerned email, asking if everything is ok. (That's just what I got from the Notification, I have not read it yet) I have felt like crying for days, but I somehow don'T. Instead, I get like mini-mental breakdowns just tensing up, having this forced breath, and feeling utterly crushed, wanting to cry. I am always so determined to do it until I am almost doing it then I don't. It is not especially hard to do. I know what I should do, and I see no reason why I should not be able to do that. And while I am getting more and more stressed, there still is time. If I started now, It would be easy to get something presentable done in time. But, I feel so stressed, and not doing what I know should be easy just makes everything worse.

I have always been prone to procrastination, but I got things done (semi) in time. Despite having some trouble, I have always been great at school, and I never had to put in much effort at all. Now that I have to, I feel like my body is physically incapable of performing actual work for school.

I am a more or less introverted person, spending most of my time inside even while the world was normal, and I feel no stress from not being able to meet people.

I don't know what I should do, and I just wanna get this done with, but I am at a point where I know, just wanting to do it really does not help.

It certainly does not help that the PC I would have to work on is the same as the one I spend the majority of my life on anyways.

​

Lastly, I thank whoever took the time to actually read this mess, even if you don't comment or can't help, thank you for caring. I hope this text was at least somewhat readable, as English is not my first language, and language, in general, is not my strength.

Sincerely a really stressed Redditor.",5.492218643303488,5.5655724542936325,6.09244411518392,81.28884075243191,67.53185595567868,9.264755524061071,30.641113186883977,9.037768484169169,2.307584706564453,2840,100,586,46,43,926,274,722,0.132,0.7440000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.7225,2,0,2,0,0,0,104.0,5,4,1,17,37,34,1,7,30,4,88,7,3,4,7,129,139,53,0,22,42,0,10,5,0,9,2,0,1,1,39,26,0,3,21,2,2,6,25,12,0,3,21,11,91,22,75,104,22,87,0,0,1,2,31,32,0,16,50,443,130,36,0.15076769718832336,0.0,0.09808501596934653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05032402346178952,0.0,0.0,0.0401896243235445,0.1254508018090897,0.05445224563782327,0.06106641814354066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396496315199587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08552813716110652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164594895457863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051239238474593884,0.0,0.0,0.0432910070811636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04012524604190018,0.0,0.11040749057047776,0.0648217946573853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795855187672266,0.15428769965006522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638709471258025,0.04545933790679987,0.0,0.0,0.1355002846756302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20328714069559595,0.07180564866409903,0.04825354427766096,0.0,0.0,0.08549528413911603,0.0,0.055102999349364884,0.0,0.0,0.21005306419647368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12058270033275315,0.1108146122712362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04501941429567383,0.0,0.0,0.0534196706319412,0.0,0.0,0.13474187917156394,0.0,0.0,0.04991544732902629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056732792872814124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05233378528777166,0.16571596691757887,0.08193053060331411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03549722775154385,0.12276246879278445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09071582205090957,0.04755334683000093,0.0335462028678537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064612594166782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040113779162662025,0.0,0.07388773665799582,0.07452822472972491,0.038760447535114206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09848022148762696,0.04822189055982515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034054697837826546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03484111260230994,0.043881512601222604,0.05250671809773719,0.0,0.047508068756448835,0.0,0.04813125928852553,0.0,0.0,0.0480881081956543,0.0,0.050521059330550136,0.0,0.0534533347741518,0.10053899804558253,0.0,0.16097607907727704,0.10334286868940283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051699173155661,0.0400474448998452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0415721990348583,0.05648973618618688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737889275921124,0.049704369213095546,0.0,0.10671415206697403,0.0,0.04013442590972298,0.04201618192667648,0.4029757380561458,0.0,0.11506196161673933,0.0,0.0,0.04736559011252965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253775952804287,0.0,0.0,0.03338778624038455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20513233223516836,0.0,0.04763671604347199,0.0,0.11167230602615937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05231816329382115,0.060451658726873934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059284462705341386,0.0398907934564781,0.08062450167811365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13604439629728973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29269514450055073,0.0,0.10243010925307992,0.10710104634602816,0.0,0.06106641814354066,0.0
mentalhealth,welsh_hero,2020/04/08,"i’m mentally deteriorating quicker and quicker life’s just painful

I’m 18 M people from the outside probably wouldn’t be able to tell i feel tbis way but i’m glad i want my parents and friends to have happy memory’s of me . I’ve been struggling with depression since about 10 i got bullied a lot at school for the way i looked and really didnt have to many friends so those built into me having terrible social anxiety , trust and general skills . i continued to not have any friends really until about 13 when i hit puberty and people started talking to me i was cinfused why now? someone said i had a “glow up “ or some stupid shit like that most people be cheered up by that not me it just depressed me more round year later i started self harming i harmed aroujfvweird plsces as i was going gym a lot at the time so blamed the scars on stretch marks from muscle growth this has continued to about 17 then other shit started kick into i started get really bad body dismorphia seeing this ugly lump of lard every tine i looked in mirror even tho i’m in v good shape ik i am but still when i look in mirror i look fat to me it’s weird. now i’m 18 i’m confused , my body is gross from scars i’ve started to lose my hair due to genetics the meds to slow it give the awful side affects so i can’t take them which i tbink has been final straw in tured of going gym eating healthy still being slightly chubby i’m so unhappy about everything this is it  my pillows stained from tears every night but i’m tired of this feeling this way i used to worry about how my parents would react and i’m sorry to do this to them i love them they are only people i love but the mental pain is too much i’m suffering more being a live if i can even pass this as a life",1.5239178020996178,3.714742504132232,3.1568773732410134,89.90347330801876,81.25895316804409,6.017988236170055,22.482987119350753,7.2228458231874715,0.8183703223885046,1391,46,289,19,37,459,200,363,0.245,0.62,0.135,-0.9944,2,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,4,2,22,28,3,2,12,1,26,15,6,4,0,34,60,24,0,4,10,2,4,1,3,2,7,1,1,1,16,9,2,0,2,2,0,4,5,17,0,0,8,11,37,11,43,45,7,43,0,4,7,2,17,14,2,7,23,173,53,1,0.09032610507420408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06142484886458259,0.0,0.06909922314834445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541852481303092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20066388034932836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555954838885473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242615542776336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11931908103145207,0.0,0.15220727851596882,0.0,0.08117927897981743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09134318544261258,0.0,0.0,0.098947833003655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20935717415021587,0.0,0.04719166182876803,0.08664903059105207,0.10266881415915692,0.07576125144321377,0.07224203767457336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615381845858922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759999854838505,0.04412877239145578,0.0,0.07975960563148084,0.0,0.30340471620582793,0.10105180705515936,0.0,0.15358404888400742,0.16304567279212648,0.0,0.0,0.09157649330245574,0.0,0.0,0.10033194017466417,0.0,0.18205493797630645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640008028439402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476493075397484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686970731591128,0.1922266885257558,0.0,0.20059290062210533,0.0,0.0,0.25048299256470885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738681851944143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735956475279277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592081039550095,0.0,0.0,0.09141484061569534,0.07197821118389351,0.0,0.09422982698392954,0.0,0.18543689767532456,0.07471868752159645,0.0,0.0,0.09207608908851578,0.0765330157100831,0.0,0.0,0.10111267952342903,0.3196664103871653,0.0,0.1442690883824918,0.0,0.0,0.09442845692356973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791398979332601,0.07260070176659612,0.0789489971190936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05266987825206377,0.10381657027596207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801275351239922,0.0,0.0,0.053276677041451115,0.2150899736213551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150526050256181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917305442363338,0.0,0.06416507346215389,0.0,0.0,0.058167050210104425
mentalhealth,dontcry2022,2020/04/08,"Coronavirus, nervous breakdown Social distancing has wrecked me. Being out of my routine has been terrible for me.


My boyfriend is an unbeliever, and my acknowledgement of us being in an interfaith relationship sent me on a downward spiral of ROCD, trying to figure out if we are compatible, what about his eternity, etc. I've had severe series of rumination for hours at a time, endless scrolling on forums. I didn't sleep at all last night reading about how sex before marriage is a sin, and how we're going to have to put a stop to the things we've been doing. 

Throughout college, I held faith in Jesus but after bad OCD senior year intertwined with my religious beliefs, I took a step back from practicing in church. I hadn't tried to deepen my faith, and now I feel pressure to from worrying about my SO. I always felt a bit uneasy about my beliefs, and now I feel pressure to know what they are for certain, which isn't possible when you have to have faith. I don't know how to have a personal faith and not feel like I'm a) making decisions based off concerns of my relationship b) worrying about my SO's own faith. It's consuming.

I'm no longer keeping up in my classes. I keep losing weight.

I can't focus, I don't feel like it's fair to myself to think about my relationship, religion, etc. in this mental state. I don't know how to get a grip in my classes.

How do I get help :(",5.525675500969618,5.9838582234432245,6.4494979530273655,77.42540400775698,67.4981684981685,9.646972635207927,31.80973928032752,9.627879704456738,2.896885110967464,1097,43,210,22,17,365,150,273,0.157,0.752,0.091,-0.9411,0,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,2,1,1,1,17,15,0,3,12,0,24,3,1,6,2,38,44,15,0,1,3,0,7,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,9,1,4,14,1,0,5,9,7,0,0,9,7,34,8,44,33,5,34,10,1,0,1,13,15,0,1,15,145,41,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739848850768983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924862705241116,0.10776997427093887,0.0,0.0,0.109831015707175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409135157924929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878994534187723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610513204648386,0.18441854547667824,0.12392964363303526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13486989287306878,0.0,0.07335475924376864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651443804879225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711021011465592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294507711276063,0.0,0.0,0.21280427201600494,0.10521114679067042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611640646711778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14439888175172522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861567586151236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007451438651013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112560447291335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11270094871073945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550961819773714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12975330563846424,0.0,0.0,0.1291072229566744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4157260199131731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458149534338298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12916550862801265,0.13157294943965156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079102173931792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574989697456037,0.08270431438742687,0.0,0.0,0.07526309269705643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14340406799825686,0.17526323041455358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15525807762302898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15717528200935518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621583600770943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311832563816278
mentalhealth,RamenTheory,2020/04/08,"Seeking audio recordings about people's experiences during quarantine Hello,

I am an NYU student directing a **PSA** to help people recognize the **impact that the shelter-in-place can have on one's mental health** and to make them aware of the resources that are available to help with such.

I am seeking people with diagnosed mental health problems to **submit audio content** describing their experiences during quarantine. I would like to know how the isolation has affected your mental well-being, how coping with your mental health condition is different during quarantine, etc.

Even if you are only able to record on an iPhone, that would be totally fine.

The final PSA will be a compilation of people's audio with animation over each statement. **We fully intend to treat this issue with care and integrity and to tell your story as honestly as possible.**

Please PM me for my email if you are interested!

Thank you all for your time,
Noah Shipman",4.364389610389608,7.730305006060611,5.067012987012987,72.72909090909094,80.75757575757575,7.991341991341993,26.64502164502165,8.704169506293173,3.060774891774892,766,31,109,20,21,246,106,165,0.04,0.7929999999999999,0.16699999999999998,0.9663,1,4,0,0,0,0,31.0,1,7,2,0,5,8,0,0,9,0,14,4,0,5,2,24,18,9,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,3,4,3,0,0,4,10,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,15,7,23,13,4,5,0,0,0,0,15,3,0,2,3,79,19,1,0.13124143351289488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13380938824942654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320729240511595,0.0,0.13711936470576114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14636889047306478,0.08668372906782852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567586104645241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437685753827866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4185105200942917,0.0,0.0,0.17593673286601302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1369819589925667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212685959868502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411793515353177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760467597629025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5290419866656065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893259190333343,0.09981502415204882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3639451406410801,0.0,0.0,0.14406368293434774,0.0,0.14795499689804786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12558032732908872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471079759061065,0.12082947913599044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652793529701972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180018101906292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18646029773375544,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Medico_,2020/04/08,"Mental Health — Is it important for Universal Health Coverage? Introduction:

Before we dive into this topic let us make ourselves familiar with WHO definitions of a few common terms. The theme of World Health Day (April 7) 2019 was Universal Health Coverage which the WHO defines as “All people having access to the health services they need including prevention, promotion, treatment, rehabilitation and palliative care without the risk of financial hardship when paying for them.” On the other hand, Mental health is defined as “A state of well-being in which every individual realizes his or her own potential, can cope with the normal stresses of life, can work productively and fruitfully, and is able to make a contribution to her or his community.” For decades mental health services were not identified as “the needs of people” and were largely excluded from essential health services and the notion of universal health coverage.

Problem statement:

In India, around 15 crore (12.5%) people are in need of active intervention for mental illnesses. Around 1.2 crore are living with serious mental disorders. India has the highest suicide rate among 10 South-East Asian countries. This scenario is further worsened because of a shortage of specialists and health services. To put it in numbers there is nearly one trained psychiatrist for every 2,50,000 people. (Reference)

A report by WHO projected that depression would likely be the leading cause of disability worldwide by 2020.

Excessive anxiety and stress can contribute to problems such as heart disease, ulcers, and colitis; they can also reduce the strength of the immune system, making people more vulnerable to infections. Psychological problems also increase the likelihood that people will make poor behavioral choices which can contribute to medical problems. Smoking, excessive alcohol or drug use, poor eating habits, and reckless behavior can all result in severe physical problems and the need for medical services. Misunderstanding and stigma surrounding mental health are widespread.

Despite the existence of effective treatments for mental disorders, there is a belief that they are un-treatable or that people with mental disorders are difficult, not intelligent, or incapable of making decisions.

This stigma can lead to abuse, rejection, and isolation and exclude people from health care or support. Within the health system, people are too often treated in institutions that resemble human warehouses rather than places of healing. The neglect of mental health care globally, combined with catastrophic healthcare costs due to high out-of-pocket expenditure, the economic costs of being unable to work, household costs of caring for someone with mental health problems and the limited economic opportunities due to social marginalisation, means that people with mental health problems and their families are at great risk of being ‘left behind’ by development initiatives such as UHC.

What has been done:

The current situation exists in spite of a series of policy and programmatic interventions in the last three decades, i.e., the National Mental Health Programme, 1982; the Mental Health Act, 1987; and the District Mental Health Programme (DMHP), 1996. All these have failed due to numerous roadblocks that existed between developing policy and implementing programme. Recently, the first National Mental Health Policy of India was released and the Mental Health Care Bill (MHCB) was passed by the Indian Parliament to replace the Mental Health Act of 1987.

The World Health Day 2017 theme- “Depression: Let’s Talk” provided an opportunity for a comprehensive appraisal of mental health services in any country.

The recent initiatives have created a new wave of awareness about mental health and people have started believing mental health disorders as a priority.

What needs to be done:

In order to increase the availability of mental health services, there are 5 key barriers that need to be overcome: the absence of mental health from the public health agenda; the current organization of mental health services; lack of integration within primary care; inadequate human resources for mental health; and lack of public mental health leadership.

The implementation of the “right to mental health” provision could define the future of “right to health” in India and elsewhere.

Last, but not least efforts for spreading awareness at individual level should be made so that it no longer remains a taboo.

Conclusion:

Till now, the efforts at the global level have not been up to the magnitude of the challenge. The situation will only be better when not only efforts are made at the highest level of administration but more importantly at the basic unit of society — family as they are the pillars of support for any individual. Also though mental health disorder may be present in one but its effect is felt most by his/her caretakers. When we are free of depression, anxiety, excessive stress and worry, addictions, and other psychological problems, we are more able to live our lives to the fullest.

Peace of mind is a natural condition, and it should be made available to everyone.",13.318580719442366,12.990149472087381,11.68179611650485,48.94157082399801,51.85194174757282,14.761961662932539,47.341797361214844,13.5591,7.122138324620362,4231,216,501,130,39,1329,386,824,0.11,0.815,0.075,-0.9698,2,1,2,0,1,1,109.0,5,0,6,19,20,39,1,5,59,0,61,50,2,15,3,110,87,50,1,22,16,0,2,1,0,6,46,0,0,2,28,38,3,5,10,0,8,8,7,22,0,4,13,3,15,18,126,56,15,78,1,6,0,0,24,42,0,9,25,362,43,19,0.040187657855433975,0.0238079015121228,0.0,0.0219052394917581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02147419220013682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04820708320138452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02732898543520353,0.0,0.03074344826095026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03577553576958094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.012249011610159071,0.0,0.017098368437055592,0.02263886425016133,0.0,0.017771358778878157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292198665182655,0.020641897408685963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01604328734904109,0.0,0.0,0.02591771467477139,0.0,0.051920356235000055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11514634399430684,0.0,0.0,0.041125926842895316,0.0,0.0,0.023302462187679174,0.020561003422945645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03385983502267382,0.019200514642554668,0.0,0.0,0.037885347216146566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019293226903775305,0.0,0.0,0.017091800620978804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02215351733025568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7475580182126467,0.0,0.023811284027358832,0.0,0.021230233489895202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032758304927421364,0.0,0.0,0.021832003923714455,0.04109460295430465,0.01419286561676632,0.009816829835578808,0.0,0.053229657237557036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05703980033959104,0.0670639342019492,0.0,0.0,0.0218880704100868,0.0,0.040484837333311215,0.5467460428836891,0.0,0.020289039110258943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893959172515218,0.0,0.019406745190962457,0.0,0.0,0.01968768602531901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027232197027602156,0.03056452472427688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15323584022413464,0.0,0.020993774475985792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538166444236213,0.0,0.020199848025145867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039680463857072634,0.0,0.0,0.03432004022690866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022700307207309662,0.0,0.0,0.045172611226366066,0.0,0.020483128116262,0.017025436043515103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.014222515537407991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690522394402156,0.0,0.0,0.02197938748651655,0.0456044778890546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01615065855138709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019742084899540036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024170402112143108,0.01735461660801735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018066765377859617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019369734036361733,0.0,0.02925709355145093,0.020406258653763932,0.0,0.014274079550133581,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SailorDankmeme,2020/04/08,"How can I meditate when my neighbors are rude and noisy I’m trying to meditate more often, but my next door neighbors haven loud, annoying, kids, my neighbors keep driving loud cars and motorcycles, and across the street is a very loud dog.

I try to relax, but the moment I start to feel relaxed and calm, the kids scream, the bully revs up is engine, and the dog barks at me.

How can I ignore the loud noises?",5.41,5.869395000000001,5.695000000000004,82.73000000000002,67.75,8.4,27.25,8.238735603445708,1.6517,320,9,63,4,5,102,51,80,0.191,0.691,0.11800000000000001,-0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,2,0,7,0,5,0,0,2,0,13,9,10,0,0,2,0,1,0,3,0,0,5,4,2,0,5,0,2,1,2,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,6,8,3,6,9,1,10,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,4,38,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22168317341812446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896963631230104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4662748415338883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31032271951728185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5953298230038006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36175032679761016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OhZaon,2020/04/08,"I hate my BPD AND MYSELF I hate my anger outburst, I hate I don’t talk to any of my loving family members. I don’t wanna lose my
Girlfriend. This is all so stressful but looks so simple. I swear last year I was fine. What happened this year? I really don’t know.",-1.2451388888888886,0.7585573035714326,1.3759523809523806,96.2801587301587,100.96428571428572,3.9174603174603178,15.150793650793652,5.82211442006289,-0.6132158730158728,203,5,45,2,9,69,37,56,0.27699999999999997,0.64,0.083,-0.8376,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,2,8,4,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,5,12,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,1,1,13,2,3,11,1,3,0,1,1,1,3,0,0,0,3,29,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15109150522372558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798306850254886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20945359096417687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964749730412867,0.0,0.0,0.6580767295585971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221055186912989,0.1811081356019252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865770779696136,0.24856503378952635,0.0,0.0,0.20052809716054346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14233559745560553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545089430372551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17858162474924216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861560861157008
mentalhealth,Ttoasstyy,2020/04/08,"Sometimes I feel there is no point in life or that everything good ends (which is true) Sometimes I feel like there is no point in life, that I'll finish school, get a job, retire and die (at least I hope so and I dont die earlier). But its that way for all of us and sometimes I feel there is no point in that. The only thing I see point in when I feel like this is making a family. I know this things are necessary and same for all of us, but sometimes I feel like its just a never ending circle. I know I said sometimes a lot, that because I dont feel that constantly only sometimes.

I also sometimes have this feeling that everything good ends, which is true but when I have a good time  its like a reminder that its going to end. Even when Im doing nothing I think of that I will have good times in my life, but they will not last forever. 

When Im watching movies or tv shows I usually get a strong showhole or psd (post series/show depression) which is normal, but sometimes I feel like that, just not for movies, but for life.

 I watch a lot of youtube because I dont get so attached to it, but recently I found a streamer on twitch and I feel similar as with movies, but its not the same. I dont know how to explain it becauee even I dont understand it. I really like her and I want to meet her at like meet and greet, but I know its probably never going to happen, because I cant go to twitchcon and other events and when I'll be able to go and if I ever decide to go she might not even be there. This will probably last for a week or two, because I usually get over excited for stuff and then after a few weeks I forget about it, so that much of a problem.

I dont like talking about my age, because Im young and I feel a lot of people are not going to take me seriously becaues of that. I do kinda think it should be mentioned here Im fairly young, Im going to high school next year and I have pretty much my whole life ahead of me. 

I dont have any mental disorders or anything like that, even though it is possible. I might be addicted to electronics, but I dont like to admit that. I am on my phone or pc most of my time if I can, but I remember when I didnt have my phone for a month and it wasnt that bad.

I know this post is a mess. If you did not understand something, its fine, feel free to ask. Im not writting this because I want you to feel bad for me or anything like that. Im writting this because I feel that I need to get this out of me. Also I do realize Im young and have my whole life of me and that I have a good life, I have food, clean water, family, friends and so on and Im grateful for that. Any comment as long as its not hate would be appreciated. Thank you.",1.959967263624108,3.0876924991334502,3.746541883304449,91.03950856922779,76.34835355285962,7.000639322164452,23.567456191026373,7.554174236665415,0.8307126439437701,2080,62,483,27,45,701,201,577,0.042,0.7659999999999999,0.192,0.9981,1,0,1,0,0,3,58.0,2,3,1,2,28,32,1,0,18,0,49,11,0,2,7,106,98,57,2,11,31,0,13,11,1,7,9,1,1,0,49,20,2,0,28,2,1,7,24,7,0,1,5,17,70,26,55,81,14,64,0,1,3,0,21,17,0,18,48,335,119,4,0.04185353835813944,0.0,0.0,0.045626534624662735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694051900747439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056923682605039626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06888379183232947,0.0,0.03912740855248471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698919126111626,0.17859469958836516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04522880622324593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036048391259274976,0.0,0.08687472998844711,0.0,0.04796778097894154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3924162819748071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14827924878788815,0.0,0.0,0.1105754694217193,0.03785892160522882,0.0,0.0,0.07523052308912657,0.0,0.0789115821890586,0.0,0.2751112851759336,0.11960070466314884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05060946471563164,0.0458902445270443,0.032335939913307694,0.0,0.1093337317551823,0.0,0.16650431254870424,0.17552381123564878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03701094574666963,0.0,0.0,0.04132170416385282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04422056119408506,0.0,0.04157000727097841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4068810317702878,0.0,0.04153317871354055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150080505852254,0.06823243975847035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069367432897306,0.22492277211695566,0.0,0.0,0.03703906439290936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067471448461846,0.0,0.0,0.027937561852109685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04217852260772455,0.08879998027632698,0.0,0.0,0.03340709501141941,0.0,0.06153433284615505,0.0310338683683015,0.06456005794118587,0.0,0.04451171286192163,0.0,0.04100758124336813,0.0401595988508065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366300382806969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02901597364559278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826048803030895,0.04718357588910687,0.08016824072101865,0.04258009512887435,0.09025038644436477,0.04004818376491831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026812448393324008,0.0,0.04132531988017298,0.0,0.04741190010007714,0.0,0.03981229934243584,0.0,0.0,0.08471603054441616,0.03335185127555877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03222089860697455,0.331153757027237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047912288048748586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031468652108204584,0.03364028874841693,0.0,0.038533114919956334,0.0,0.0,0.055611262286236765,0.053636114816173634,0.041120888934850885,0.0,0.07321540438161234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04088482541892157,0.08714201895026095,0.10068930670916923,0.0,0.09219151895625953,0.0,0.049372602622835486,0.03322139062683705,0.06714476780876673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345596180167852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02973155281294252,0.0,0.0,0.02695230648048488
mentalhealth,stellarbunny,2020/04/08,"I don't even know where to begin Hi all. First post in this sub. As I'm sitting in my quiet house after not having slept all night, feeling more anxious than I have in a while, I realized I want to get help but I don't even know where to start? I'm 28. Female, if that even matters. A registered nurse and nurse practitioner student. Obviously under a tremendous amount of stress as I just submitted my last assignment for the semester, one that my overall grade pretty much relies on and the anxiety of getting feedback on it is making me crazy. And I mean, that's just my situation at this very moment. I've been putting off therapy or a psych appointment for several years. I've submitted appointment requests over the years and always called to tell them I've changed my mind. I have no hobbies. I stare at my phone all day. I had some bullshit blog I've been running for the past few years but even that doesn't interest me anymore. I'll get random bursts of inspiration sometimes that are very short lived and then I'm back to laying on the couch without a shower for days at a time. I stopped doing my makeup, I don't watch what I eat. I quit playing video games. I quit spending time with my animals more than just like taking care of their needs and I LOVE them like they're my children. I have literally zero friends. I'm a mess. I basically go to work and come home and procrastinate homework until the last minute. And I realistically have been like this for the past 18 years but never got help and a big part of me thinks it's too late. So idk. I guess this is more of a vent and just like trying to keep myself sane or maybe talk myself into getting off the couch and doing something productive. 

Y'all take care of yourselves please. ❤",3.912696424748447,5.528722534682082,4.686390494540785,84.28807856989941,72.20809248554913,7.669278527081996,26.97666452579748,8.285830014693849,1.7263364590023549,1391,49,276,22,27,448,194,346,0.08199999999999999,0.759,0.159,0.9832,1,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,3,4,13,13,0,1,17,0,18,3,1,1,5,49,47,24,0,3,12,0,1,4,1,0,0,1,5,1,12,15,1,2,7,4,1,4,8,2,0,3,6,4,38,11,41,41,11,49,0,0,2,1,16,18,0,6,29,175,50,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786897479636492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078492027190555,0.11929972801519377,0.10472839216773333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08120109724279513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078310209668776,0.0,0.21533569921509094,0.0,0.11171247022220927,0.09096641126087407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13620856683736793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805678062748968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789953926789939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053395332227697684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08982465068649394,0.0,0.0,0.08158751937421674,0.0,0.2206898697052628,0.0,0.060015811961102325,0.0,0.084459231058088,0.0,0.11633204688465655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14156502725616468,0.0,0.10592699577443684,0.0,0.0,0.12185004590980875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386353711940064,0.0,0.0,0.11607173418146235,0.1721587656233008,0.1191231828296058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20636639295857173,0.0,0.0932481305618294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530954963787257,0.0,0.07048987519732865,0.0,0.10609098173622072,0.11503107966133284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662749298670768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776293125655989,0.0783022340944439,0.08144644924809083,0.0,0.0,0.09909992993861202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155836414414185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143562212133396,0.20161731589340784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591882416479805,0.0,0.0,0.10113712343848054,0.10743477213270423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10615875606177552,0.0,0.22464055988415124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929972801519377,0.0,0.0,0.1187006013580785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129725613045595,0.10444266364198536,0.0,0.07474534242242667,0.0,0.0,0.08828765007910333,0.12096625402210548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15879849297357254,0.08487855053460729,0.09230043620201953,0.0,0.12076461092001753,0.0,0.0,0.06766522897516493,0.0,0.0,0.12315426198610994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169654149705858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742647273133755,0.062286548401648816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179615549522167,0.0,0.07687920853509977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720158230194399
mentalhealth,Throwaway2864482938,2020/04/08,"Can't tell if I'm morbidly curious or pure sadistic To make a long story short, I've caught a beetle in a small jar today. I thought it was already dead at first, but later found out it was alive and searching around. It had a few legs broken so I knew releasing it would still mean death for the thing. So I tried to kill it, since I know keeping it alive like that was practically torture. I added just enough water to the tiny jar for the beetle to drown in, but watching it struggle to crawl up to air and lose power was suddenly so fascinating to me. So I emptied the water before it died. After watching it search around in the jar again, I did it again. And again, and again. I don't know how this thing is still alive, or why I enjoy watching it almost die but still stay alive. This isn't my first time capturing alive bugs in a jar either, but the other times I allowed the water to fully kill them. I found it amusing then but this time was a lot more entertaining. It took me an hour distracted from the beetle to realize how messed up what I was doing was and how I was out right torturing it. I know I should end its suffering but I still kept it in the jar. I'm not sure what to do. I feel like I should feel horrible but I don't, I just feel surprised about all this. One part of me is going, well, it's just a bug, who cares. Another part is going well, you're still actively torturing a living creature, what is wrong with you.
I don't know. I don't want to let it die but I'm certain that's what I'm supposed to do.",2.0485565939771533,3.5997112180685384,3.530155763239879,90.92852544132921,77.00623052959502,6.749325025960541,22.16926272066459,7.526774132740827,0.6907661474558671,1195,33,267,16,27,394,153,321,0.242,0.606,0.152,-0.9924,2,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,1,4,24,22,5,2,18,0,27,4,1,5,4,56,52,24,8,5,16,0,3,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,32,10,3,2,13,2,0,4,7,11,2,3,17,6,28,11,31,31,8,43,0,2,3,0,4,16,0,5,24,186,60,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508709838172113,0.0,0.11580924096921465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100438154391828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18684631505848748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08930032960380202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106998258966169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3267485269577176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294997929064533,0.1084360736283526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591897935950818,0.07497261493068967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17853205521856344,0.0,0.23013320141825994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119285142476346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033495282380947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09327979604673373,0.2322118339997619,0.0,0.2306997588949723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10731320951078796,0.0,0.10254149607418184,0.0,0.0926682167270343,0.09287288130763767,0.0,0.1174064325256632,0.0,0.08922035042122355,0.0,0.0,0.07005149585831544,0.0,0.0,0.11431569679923036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111333982984765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272900706455627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962232026877699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681145642573182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185723648117316,0.4190454254190688,0.0,0.0,0.1097111331244971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890927007938967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917264161161618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944137753831334,0.0,0.0,0.08331448080290271,0.1835825410947987,0.0,0.099475437794505,0.0,0.11659757907468565,0.07125065785230779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06189918587843124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887160297260797,0.0,0.09469639530995456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454980358566447,0.11474070842968373,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TackyRackyOr0dd1,2020/04/08,"My partner sees people's heads shrinking and growing when they stare at people for too long. Asking on behalf of my partner (25) here, since they've been trying to research this phenomenon that's been happening to them since they were a child. They mentioned this to me when we were watching a show and the show zoomed in on someone's head (in a little bubble over where their head was,keeping their body the same size) and then zoomed back out. 

Basically, they said they see that happening IRL when they stare at someone for a prolonged period of time, seeing people's heads constantly shrink and grow. They've been trying to research this for years, but the most they found was Alice in Wonderland syndrome, which didn't seem to totally line up with what they experience. They mentioned experiencing this to a doctor when they were young, but all the doctor said was, ""Huh, that *is* weird.""

Is there anything that you think this might be indicative of? Is there a name for this phenomenon? 

(For the record, my partner is considering mentioning this to their therapist and/or psychiatrist to get their opinions on this.)",8.736966696669668,8.785363425742577,7.460927092709272,74.27907740774081,60.78217821782178,10.513771377137717,34.205220522052194,10.018931242160765,3.257380198019802,900,32,156,16,11,272,110,202,0.0,0.991,0.009000000000000001,0.1803,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,1,1,15,0,10,1,0,0,11,1,15,7,5,0,2,19,27,11,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,2,2,0,4,14,7,0,0,3,2,0,2,1,1,0,0,12,9,21,0,28,13,4,27,0,0,6,0,28,13,0,4,12,110,35,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068588074915348,0.0,0.12139599481776092,0.0,0.0,0.09984973840769504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14423856069405747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403260816142654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26582221682462864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702216441565672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14237824821232845,0.0,0.0,0.06784337437402671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296589906809875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5330708160258086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542023378538414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13014785812722787,0.0,0.11491673574714167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13775461171907466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700733156085021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470418493560353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31043056371950983,0.11821423755769232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148332011979888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22004980691852796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15077054449877084,0.0,0.0832052231051162,0.0,0.0,0.07571893275245682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632473344078978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362174186523963
mentalhealth,The_Walking_Dank,2020/04/08,"I’m experiencing some things since I was a child,and I don’t know if those are normal. Like I said in the title,I’m having some things about my mental health.The most certain thing is those aren’t caused by puberty.

I’ll try to explain them as much as possible,but I’ll probably fail.

First of all,I get excited over “fictional” beings’ suffering.This started with cartoon characters.I used to enjoy them getting injured, or hurt.I was at about 9(maybe wrong,but sometime around that).Now this keeps going,with characters from series, books, movies etc.

Let me describe the feeling.I feel happy.I feel like I got some good news, my heart beats fast, I feel adrenaline in my blood.

The second one is something closer to munchauser syndrome, but not quite that.I used to want to lose parts of my body(eye,leg,arm etc.).I have no idea why,but the closest thing to a reason is “attention”.I wanted to bad things to happen to me.

I have a couple of other things, but they don’t make me feel as concerned as the ones I explained above.

I just want to see if those are normal.I looked them up online, but I found nothing.Help would be appreciated.",3.382556561085977,5.599736972850682,3.99008823529412,86.13689705882356,75.19909502262443,6.772941176470589,25.52963800904977,7.734863291789972,1.4290305882352938,905,32,173,13,20,286,138,221,0.075,0.835,0.09,-0.2272,1,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,4,5,4,9,0,0,8,0,17,3,2,5,1,36,41,10,0,7,8,0,4,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,11,2,0,1,10,1,0,0,5,3,0,4,5,8,20,6,28,32,7,11,0,2,2,0,7,8,0,7,5,104,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593771716149744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936236265645304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12224865077869025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167432864359854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654391456684667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2406855541299672,0.0850156201678271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012237162080756,0.0,0.1304804218038021,0.0,0.0,0.1243480969328256,0.0,0.0,0.09981389797625248,0.09517740587285864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10523377816252677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649440573067836,0.0,0.14101888445719676,0.07976506468129868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273949527853062,0.13433966991921725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057751515986578,0.0,0.0,0.06540082366460095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168842006102985,0.0,0.11627750865756263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999323757593335,0.13313368730821173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794352893997941,0.0,0.11955430213677465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992682709881322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874807465936486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331949438462922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16127874673783432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288684297045366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283051399331399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657412029299198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235469263220455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319890893409547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482981987180254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844034135035602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161416515568876,0.1176968066528918,0.0,0.0842307904502742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4743610129952864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08079508591609802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20556041173025366,0.0,0.0,0.21057279435444773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453617085497411,0.13011087441278946,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eyevoid,2020/04/08,"i’m thinking about a lot of things i’m not good at explaining. i’m just going to bullet point. some of these things aren’t correlated. i just really need someone to point me in the right direction.
- i am very on edge, the moment i hear something i don’t want to i lash out
- i have not done a single school assignment this year
- i can’t focus on anything, all i can clearly think about is my favorite novel (this has been the case since 2017)
- i’ve been having nightmares and dreams where i brutally murder the people i know
- i’ve had a strong urge to hurt someone or something. i haven’t done anything like that in a few months but also haven’t been redirecting my feelings toward anything
- it feels like everything is distorted and the only thing i have is my favorite novel. everything else is just, impossible to think about without getting upset.
- i have no hobbies anymore. i have loved drawing my entire life until 2018, there was a brief period where i had no hobbies before i got into video editing. now since december 2019 i have had no hobbies. all i do is walk in circles and think about my favorite novel. occasionally i play video games.
- i started testing for an IEP a few weeks ago but i don’t think i will be able to finish it because of school shutting down.
i don’t know what’s wrong with me. i know something is wrong. if i was fine then i’d be doing schoolwork and keeping my grades decent and would have attended school for the past year and not broken things or hurt things. it’s impossible to ask for help when i don’t know what’s wrong. maybe i’m just too caught up in my own situation to take a step back and rationally look at what’s wrong. i would appreciate some input or advice.
info: 15 years old. female(?). USA. prof dx depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD. suspected to have ADHD, ASD.",3.2313175063428794,5.241278162921346,4.334777093149693,84.4384215295397,74.95505617977528,7.065458499456326,25.528814787966642,7.941651935203635,1.5273504168176877,1430,50,276,22,31,466,188,356,0.152,0.708,0.14,-0.855,1,0,3,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,0,1,16,17,2,1,14,0,42,3,0,0,3,49,71,17,1,5,14,0,2,2,0,3,2,1,0,0,15,10,0,1,14,8,0,6,15,10,0,0,12,4,36,7,35,54,9,42,0,3,1,1,6,19,0,7,19,183,51,8,0.08922205771486134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722757489973776,0.08718676218167172,0.07908997081331158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135084731953302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825462994035777,0.0,0.08848430657105222,0.0,0.0,0.22026645386198385,0.0,0.08341057987093302,0.0,0.0,0.06860625503378062,0.0,0.054388938253780085,0.0,0.07592139960028349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0768468275714482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18261028455818915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07453358049637981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603740648052497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022670640702234,0.06374025585890702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04661484265138576,0.0,0.050706951522482606,0.07483522889936926,0.0713590301446613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055974350628852,0.0,0.05980366456601235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19102811623649749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930466440289037,0.0,0.0,0.19613643824679156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06302017797372934,0.08717878123853423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492405733104185,0.0,0.0,0.07585340285819771,0.0805263905493696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896355492342209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07121619523991951,0.0,0.0,0.06615702526698139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09362354080616483,0.0,0.0,0.06785739539205328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08517254977510028,0.0618553407147357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16868736731641598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042958108785028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05715793483349926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761951497874506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708924572372952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14761081627407505,0.10028933112918044,0.0,0.0,0.1511951199305622,0.2060624970727547,0.0,0.0,0.06315183167398969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708388357948944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963758530307136,0.2858494597744632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361754170455183,0.05262548130403003,0.0,0.07156855290730386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08600687974057193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267615797894861,0.3902012551917276,0.0,0.17236823972490672
mentalhealth,opalalive,2020/04/08,"Struggling really bad Hey, I’m really struggling to keep my head up above water right now, I need some reasons to keep going :)",4.195,6.232968500000003,5.315000000000001,78.33000000000001,72.33333333333334,8.133333333333335,24.5,8.841846274778883,2.0489,100,3,17,2,2,33,19,24,0.306,0.6,0.095,-0.7708,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,5,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,7,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22655121107637705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420444940547046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2784653102923619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4823453882496221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20118952824595254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3476449522407408,0.2789748860194153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317163774898118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5673110506773511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hoejinuwu,2020/04/08,"PLS HELP idk what I’m dealing with and I’m having a hard time socializing with people bcus of it it started 2 yrs ago when I was 14, it’s rlly difficult to explain in words. So it was like this, first I started to get easily intimidated to people. Especially strangers and people I disliked in school, it was the first year I had to commute going to school bcus i stopped using school service. I’m kinda awkward, I look kinda sad bcus for sum reason I CANT CONTROL MY EYES LIKE MY EYES LITERALLY FROZE WHEN IM WITH PEOPLE AND I CANT MAKE GENUINE FACIAL EXPRESSION SO IM LIKE SOO AWKWARD BCUS OF THIS I LOST MOST OF MY FRIENDS AND I BECAME LAME AND I WAS NO LONGER THE FRIENDLY PERSON PEOPLE USED TO KNOW PLS RLLY HELP!! IM NOT DEPRESSED BUT ITS RLLY HARD! I CANT EVEN STAY THE SAME WAY AND IM AWKWARD NOW EVEN WITH MY FAMILY. THE ONLY WAY I CAN FEEL COMFORTABLE IS MY MOTHER AND MYSELF. and also other symptoms are like when I’m with people I can’t stay focused as I was before bcus i focused on controlling my eye’s expression which is pretty HARD and I do so by looking straight but still I feel uncomfortable. I used to have ocd b4 but I managed to control it but after than then this change came to me. It sucks bcus I cant even meet new people, heck I can’t even talk normally with my old friends. Pls help.",0.2182865168539294,2.6253912734082405,2.3046357677902627,90.42841432584272,95.06741573033709,4.617565543071161,20.158146067415725,6.385866456164764,0.3967903370786514,1038,36,207,13,40,346,136,267,0.12300000000000001,0.6829999999999999,0.19399999999999998,0.9761,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,6,13,17,1,3,5,0,19,5,4,8,0,40,40,22,0,1,5,1,6,4,3,0,1,0,0,1,14,16,0,4,5,0,0,2,8,9,0,2,8,11,31,8,26,32,2,27,0,4,5,0,15,4,2,3,21,128,45,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766328128855993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913412757191781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07356268247101318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887590361813453,0.0,0.0,0.09145276122781072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908834726667291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912627492525793,0.07445935935461911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228397948586932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149747672782624,0.0,0.08742355368538715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706885122606994,0.0,0.0,0.200373438533532,0.0,0.04516661819268316,0.0,0.04913159390580462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23232697370401603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17383707400947812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3735238463980873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047510723602658435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689406421963872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451926510285998,0.0,0.09437051525643356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05770612459447577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349406199393337,0.0,0.0,0.08470275985694839,0.0,0.0,0.0907148556322206,0.0,0.0,0.06574920979877415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4195353837605242,0.07548490789062659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795084867314239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08888511883197195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624764021798308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08812500766822519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237967596369835,0.18428864497716785,0.069039175348623,0.07227616904351238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985477303429625,0.0,0.06948532961417665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05040975861154949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22399543365348087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13724015838334452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05567104116331142
mentalhealth,Irish22princess,2020/04/08,Lonesome I find myself (23f) feeling so desperately lonely. Any advice on coping with feeling you have no one in the world?,3.217575757575758,6.356630454545456,4.433636363636363,76.33712121212123,85.36363636363636,4.751515151515153,25.51515151515152,6.42735559955562,1.507951515151516,98,4,14,1,3,32,21,22,0.376,0.52,0.10400000000000001,-0.8336,0,2,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,3,0,3,3,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5056619863461052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35189476389752794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5232929224757108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4729547364444103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506484924645229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theneerex,2020/04/08,"Need help dealing with my friend's suicide Today I learnt that a friend of mine committed suicide a few days ago. I was trying to text him and call him, but his phone numbers were dead. So I called his brother asking what happened and that's when I knew. We've been friends for about 12 years now. We aren't as close as we used to be, but we still talk from time to time. I can't process the news of his death. There were no signs, but he was always sad about his breakup from 2 years ago. He recently moved to my city, and wanted to stay with him at his new place but I was reluctant because it meant longer commute to my work and I like my privacy. Now I feel that if I had moved in with him, things might've ended differently. May be he would've told me his problems, may be I could've helped him. Now I feel numb. The guilt comes in bouts. I don't know how to deal with this, it's never happened to me before (and hopefully it never will happen again). Please help me deal with this.",2.211299257567102,3.7070681310679614,2.8261736150770997,96.38316105082814,76.4271844660194,6.012107367218733,21.34094802969732,6.522977012572876,0.05364340376927457,769,19,180,6,17,239,120,206,0.16,0.736,0.10400000000000001,-0.9393,1,0,0,0,0,2,23.0,3,0,0,1,11,9,0,1,4,0,16,1,0,2,3,38,31,15,4,5,5,1,2,1,3,3,1,0,0,0,10,15,0,0,5,0,0,3,6,4,0,0,10,2,34,5,25,15,1,28,0,1,0,0,33,5,0,4,20,112,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21043723816538396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987662483689335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109666110716154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235720177397452,0.0,0.10100325923274407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.242407867472488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224782056059356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477069797775656,0.0,0.0,0.07655039320427176,0.36711729160794937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401415102720215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10513120047399613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003455501248607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27511735129470594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3148927598837267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386823109306771,0.0,0.0,0.11789390096957884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523331900336111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057989849287482576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12591982499010332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523143877043352,0.0,0.08801306625389411,0.1830944370034338,0.11463927231434345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401415102720215,0.13029476450166574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135779597057946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719995952203288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651627943023036,0.09479237965118488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25967270272014953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09540495974516483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885767984149503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13842752183238216,0.0,0.112511829188381,0.1134210299060561,0.0,0.08058815345350973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251696508923247,0.0,0.0,0.07001115836092969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641356089770626,0.0,0.0,0.08431965672154065,0.0,0.0,0.15287524634764085
mentalhealth,jimmyboy2001,2020/04/08,"Body dysmorphic disorder Can somebody explain to me how bdd comes because my bdd didn't come through my genitics, I'm an 18 male in college and I've never had a girlfriend and no girl has ever liked me, my male friends tell me I'm not ugly and even my most honest friend told me I wasnt ugly and he would have no problem telling me if I actually was ugly but if I ever try to talk to a girl she would give me the most dirty look ever and after I feel really sh*t about myself and I loose confidence and get really upset and I feel like I am the most ugly person in the world because this happens every time I ever try talk to a girl and I realise that it's how I look. When I was 14 my bdd started and I got really anxious on how I looked and I hated being in crowds thinking that everybody was judging on my freckles because my freckles are my biggest insecurity and I believe if I didn't have any then I wouldn't have bdd. In college at night I always felt so lonely and never had anybody to talk to. Every time I look at myself in the mirror I think I look different every time, for example some days I think i look OK especially when I'm at home alone but once I go out in public and see myself in the mirror I feel like I look like a monster. I know this paragraph is really confusing to read because I'm typing out what I am thinking I didn't plan this in advance",2.7665642633228846,3.933121255172416,4.8095297805642625,84.05890282131664,74.3793103448276,7.2037617554858935,26.630094043887148,7.686295010490155,1.492862068965517,1084,39,223,14,22,375,137,290,0.135,0.7440000000000001,0.121,-0.7490000000000001,1,3,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,12,14,1,3,10,1,22,1,1,3,6,52,54,26,0,7,6,0,4,4,3,3,0,0,1,6,7,18,0,0,10,1,0,4,10,6,0,0,12,12,47,8,26,38,4,37,0,1,8,0,21,17,0,8,20,152,54,4,0.0,0.0,0.08628598947002818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157732867474408,0.0,0.0,0.07357322595389168,0.0,0.0,0.06012920640837844,0.0,0.0,0.0998903864059056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21560210470371413,0.0,0.0,0.0996200129402332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821562529873804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233345661358044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05702412989343311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09238096319019794,0.10133794833503314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058401133941861826,0.3199268645205865,0.22349512540733285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341247073375676,0.12633573810000304,0.084897877056675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13662745040209776,0.0,0.04619624186804533,0.08482133113557272,0.050251603645694566,0.0,0.07071822682498988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819026086600273,0.0,0.0,0.08729727821911103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08869331652941939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0485937837876428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17279183344994153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5197586807402957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13639121265632093,0.0,0.0,0.08297697286539826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941653137554688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07720567095429365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08460680678689085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844477253691284,0.0,0.2265786287851223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045996526135039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625847289079069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21320797670373476,0.15456743097484912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266260277714121,0.0,0.0,0.15467671664465038,0.0,0.0,0.08448990620794072,0.0,0.12006389877428915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256232621726235,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,may8878jxosjuw,2020/04/08,"Help me I can’t stop overthinking I overthink so much that I sometimes feel like I can’t stop thinking until I kill myself ive tried to take things of my mind by keeping myself busy like cooking, painting etc. but it didn’t last too long bc my mum started complaining about how I was getting the house “dirty” l don’t blame her bc I am a messy person but only if she knew my thoughts were driving me insane",2.7371428571428567,4.413014619047623,3.5590476190476217,90.91928571428572,75.42857142857143,5.7523809523809515,26.285714285714285,6.1826913282559595,0.836757142857143,324,12,67,2,7,103,65,84,0.255,0.6829999999999999,0.062,-0.9489,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,2,0,8,1,0,1,0,12,16,6,1,1,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,3,4,1,0,1,4,2,0,0,5,1,17,2,5,11,2,7,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,8,42,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616798271866285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863840589984588,0.1676231494616651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258699987306924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572707619199674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707370588859068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20855419287362786,0.25958864442232543,0.0,0.0,0.19125867995478774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292614248329942,0.0,0.0,0.20764441628129865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369142631999211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724835769278374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784503400027063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20487405885760812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320598188167357,0.0,0.1660757205446305,0.0,0.0,0.3923304015175656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17641617047482178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558809365916708,0.1503445070109974,0.0,0.18627382386030805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593016287541871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,themotionalunstable,2020/04/08,"Let's save the children! Lately I've been thinking of helping children in conflict zones. I am working on a project who's aim is to develop a therapeutic system that does not involve spoken language. The objective is to create a system that problem-solves the language barrier between volunteer therapists and the population that needs care. 

I am considering any important contributions for right to be co-author in the outcome of the research. 

If you've an idea, post it!

Let's save children.",6.425373376623372,8.77270728409091,7.012857142857148,67.17500000000003,67.06818181818181,9.574025974025977,40.980519480519476,9.957137785484203,4.955238311688312,403,25,58,10,7,132,62,88,0.043,0.772,0.185,0.9097,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,10,0,8,0,0,0,0,10,11,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,3,10,7,0,8,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,1,38,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17648597957926992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26460315400918194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22711217946965725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739542158867072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929722684567129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927556369633033,0.0,0.0,0.5307640325695538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192434586395818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2485533234552727,0.0,0.0,0.2483304880733938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22163303255464648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3013286646279718,0.0,0.16629321630221694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18893737666598104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thelastdeathbender,2020/04/08,sanity how do I know if i'm losing my sanity?,-0.9436363636363652,0.21806009090909484,5.863636363636362,72.61545454545455,84.45454545454545,11.672727272727276,11.0,11.20814326018867,2.1042,35,0,8,2,1,16,9,11,0.245,0.755,0.0,-0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4409137609164866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8975494724161334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xbrinleyfit,2020/04/08,"How to help someone with schizophrenia? My brother has been having hallucinations for the past year. They have progressively gotten worse and I fear for our safety. He is accusing of family members coming into his room and poking him and running away. His episodes become verbally abusive, going on rants and yelling with anger that can last up to 40 minutes. Except, he is talking to no one but it seems to be directly at family members. He mainly accused of my dad for doing things he doesn’t. He has accused all of us for doing things we haven’t and we’ve tried explaining to him that we don’t do those things but he doesn’t believe us. 

We try to explain to him that he’s having hallucinations but he won’t believe them. He doesn’t believe he needs help and doesn’t want to get help. How can my family and I better support him? We registered him to a mental health clinic but it will take a year to process. How do we explain to him to get the help he needs. He also is diagnosed with a mild intellectual disability which he is also denying he has. 

His hallucinations has been happening frequently and it’s taking a toll on the family. It’s hard to deal with a loved one who is hostile towards you and doesn’t realize his actions. His hallucinations can occur up to 3 times a day at any time of the day so it leaves us with uneasiness because we don’t know how to help.",3.5098652334349403,5.467864841328417,4.985291192042356,80.30664848387615,74.01845018450184,7.812674474570832,27.280763677201985,8.587818076936951,2.0947938713300176,1096,42,208,21,23,367,130,271,0.105,0.769,0.126,0.9034,0,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,10,1,2,2,7,6,2,1,10,0,32,4,0,4,1,41,50,20,0,3,5,2,1,0,0,2,3,1,1,0,14,22,0,0,6,0,0,4,10,3,0,2,3,2,29,3,38,44,2,23,0,0,0,1,52,10,0,1,9,148,43,0,0.0,0.1233265221314514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16647727675063426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078298617348877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779351773646942,0.0,0.0,0.06345069936800134,0.11495633098716206,0.0,0.3518124927839769,0.0,0.09205682704262257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896620593992769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13425549542059742,0.1073095159915799,0.0,0.105646497387023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3924972647867129,0.11712723797438827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876271764522624,0.0,0.059155255465889685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09204412438426206,0.0,0.0932418456131436,0.0,0.0,0.1106400151955573,0.0,0.0,0.34883787616676964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05720370068744074,0.08484510521776445,0.0,0.11021350399890464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394292225557836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10489559515239212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543589434200716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410646019222872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936317978794916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475723944868597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08819289738530844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181171227714874,0.0,0.0,0.15652150845744275,0.08366149147000393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20745308609821708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138837402088586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413369940251113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3756128984519872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06139343220376822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060739303535419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13405771725548152
mentalhealth,WickedMenace_,2020/04/08,"I think I have PTSD, but I don't know how to confirm it during this pandemic. Also, a bit of a long vent. So, for a long time since I started middle school, I've been having flashbacks to various moments of my past, especially my childhood. I grew up in a prejudiced household a d family, and my parents' marriage wasn't the best. Here's a list of all that's happened to me growing up, that still affects me to this day. 

•My parents fought a lot, heard my dad call and accuse my mother of awful things. He's broken furniture, and the way they yelled was ugly. His insecurity and jealousy has put her in a spot where she's not allowed to go shopping alone or talk to any male friends. Even to this day as they're still married. 

•My father is very prejudiced against gay people and mixed marriages that don't involve white or Hispanic people only. I am gay (he doesn't know), and I'm in love with a African American girl. Growing up, I was brainwashed into hating all the things I was. Gays, other races and acceptance. My mom says she's not homophobic, but she likes to slander them all the time whenever they're mentioned. (Btw, did I mention  that he one time made her cry on her birthday because he got mad after seeing a lesbian couple at the mall we were at?) 

•Religion was always forced down my throat. My family is Catholic, and are against any religion that's not theirs, and they hate atheists as well as agnostics. Even Christianity. I was shamed for if I refused to partake in anything religious, and yelled at as well. One time, they forced me to go to the church I was baptized in, and I didn't want to go. They didn't care, and just yelled at me and to not ""ruin this trip"". I didn't feel like I belonged there,and was given dirty looks by the nuns. I refused to get on my knees to pray, and was almost feeling like passing out. Lastly, when I was first getting therapy, I'm pretty sure they purposely signed me up for a religious kind because the therapist guy kept asking me, "" Why don't you love yourself? God does, why not you?"". (They also labeled me as Roman Catholic in my parents, without my knowledge.) Of course though, they didn't acknowledge it. Now everytime I see crucifixes, nuns, or a church building, I get all those memories in an instant and experience a near panic attack. 

•I often experience negative thoughts when I'm around my parents or in their house. I still live with them, but I want to move out after I graduate high school in a month. I'm trying to save up as much as I can, but my boss cut my hours because of this pandemic. It's hard finding a second job, and I don't even have a running car or license because my dad doesn't make an effort to fix my car and no one is teaching me how to drive. 

• I want to actually go to college in a city four hours away from where I live for a change of scenery and to restart my life. My friend offered for me to be her roommate since she's going to the same college as well. However, my mother is against this, and said that I'm going to be forced to go to college in my city, even though I don't feel comfortable here and I don't want to feel like I'm just living in the past. All of my friends are going to different places, and I'll be alone. My ex offered for me to stay with him when he gets his own place, but I'm not so sure about that because I feel my presence just reminds him of the breakup (where it turned out I was actually a lesbian and him saying that it hurt him). I don't want to hurt anyone. 

So in summary, I'm fucked. I have had so many flashbacks and nightmares relating to my upbringing, and being in the house just escalates them more. Anywhere else, I'm fine. I can actually be me. If anything, my friends have been there for me mental health wise, then my own parents. Anything that reminds me of the first two above, I get a dry mouth, my heart starts to race, and I start to sweat. My severe anxiety and depression most likely stemmed from growing up here, as well as my flashbacks. I suffer from mild insomnia because of these traits. 

If I want to go this alone, my parents will most likely cut never off financially out of anger. My friend said that I'll most likely not be able to move out this summer, but said she can most likely get me on the weekends. I said that's too much trouble, but she insisted.  I have to make at least three times the rent (which is fairly cheap), and I know my parents won't be a grantor. It's difficult right now to do that. 

So yeah that's all I have to do now. I've been applying for scholarships to make it easier on my tuition and applied for financial aid. I want to be a BSN nurse and help people in any way that I can. 

All I ask is to be free. And start over. Relish in the things I never got to do growing up. This house is hurting my mental health and I need help. I just don't know what to do....",4.167555328566569,4.9011331287027575,5.032385086823293,85.4026600272387,70.62410623084781,8.057950289410964,29.44007490636704,8.199878495009871,1.8853580524344569,3779,143,791,52,66,1231,383,979,0.17,0.7240000000000001,0.106,-0.9967,12,3,0,0,0,0,129.0,1,2,12,4,44,50,9,3,40,2,68,17,5,9,11,126,142,71,0,11,28,14,6,8,5,2,4,10,1,3,38,42,0,3,15,3,6,23,28,20,4,9,33,20,126,31,133,98,22,117,8,6,4,8,83,52,1,15,47,535,164,10,0.047568732379422,0.0,0.13926066279052646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04763321418883523,0.14780058229801715,0.0,0.07608139619542824,0.03958099599137918,0.0,0.0,0.0970451076580372,0.0,0.036389950068911714,0.0,0.0,0.03326116370780978,0.0,0.1174350408887708,0.04234625697460311,0.08894068693580305,0.054116300326767265,0.04469238993738298,0.0,0.0,0.1739847464489063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049920449874635626,0.0,0.05193273556465792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04857299426250816,0.0,0.048499492950644665,0.0,0.050321411468604665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05263389760608045,0.05225201886320281,0.061355794243366964,0.0,0.0409708794952498,0.0,0.0,0.049699200847907896,0.0,0.0,0.04162771826526288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03973757201658715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256747964208336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306269598235664,0.08968713475710442,0.0,0.1202609018576084,0.10194933574962367,0.0,0.0,0.04347695961454349,0.0809238789228763,0.0,0.0,0.18375742318499425,0.043976526572433984,0.14911619604733398,0.0,0.2433096614978405,0.0,0.07609012154045175,0.0,0.0,0.047100523801078785,0.04206487294497169,0.0,0.04261224076071693,0.09392855007919296,0.0,0.1011266762102333,0.0,0.056369176904131686,0.06376863721616498,0.050258977463495766,0.0,0.0,0.09369123880456336,0.16466379139676834,0.152769935556286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04720462691075908,0.0,0.0,0.04953551469941026,0.10457012514362356,0.038774865803365186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033599202454132004,0.1859174388088234,0.0,0.12601218657182034,0.08419366251015377,0.03994575470732674,0.0,0.0,0.040441235195017015,0.08586527635947455,0.0450106847412406,0.095257494721574,0.04822722842495855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587618790639524,0.0,0.0,0.055711924445178584,0.03796890835307566,0.1011160688314036,0.069936983254745,0.035271612318122016,0.07337587786068296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09670141244629962,0.036178164503726185,0.0,0.05581165819130002,0.3697361354918525,0.0,0.09081947514084053,0.09893450870973786,0.0,0.0993984016958158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048394502097857874,0.0,0.0,0.05560530257920671,0.047819714613362777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040623437540888416,0.18099503049174995,0.0756571305144629,0.0,0.09628419348278523,0.07581224192371322,0.0,0.0,0.05373912768739118,0.0,0.07869869397194969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13467757445230716,0.05070193949522626,0.113965353375729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966593462956278,0.0,0.0,0.03823394521502201,0.0,0.0,0.05439899113200334,0.05523096465223677,0.09480765629680812,0.03048012296750452,0.09347207608627202,0.03776426003029268,0.13868855194026738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03229604679202682,0.05174112112344683,0.046467739527543385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03924918601368985,0.19640089574518949,0.07551569124109299,0.0,0.0,0.1710800127367971,0.0,0.085846764258823,0.0,0.0,0.04585456051958929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,4life2,2020/04/08,"App to help OCD battlers contain, track, and monitor compulsions! Very helpful, especially in these unprecedented times. App that helps OCD battlers!

I really think that this app is very helpful, especially in these unprecedented times. Especially considering that a lot of us are currently disconnected from our professional advisors. So don’t hesitate to check out the app **Liberate: My OCD Fighter** on the Google Play Store: [https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.bluepilltech.liberate.ocdapp&hl=en\_IN](https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.bluepilltech.liberate.ocdapp&hl=en_IN)

The app helps the user learn more about OCD, providing information about the causes and types of OCD and methods to combat it. It offers features to track the user’s compulsions, building an environment suitable to control their OCD. **Controlling OCD for the long-term** is done using various ways to resist and weaken compulsions, including scheduling of a worry-time for users, controlling of compulsions, creating a fear ladder, setting of goals and connecting with their therapist through the app. **If you have any questions regarding the app, feel free to PM me.**

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mentalhealth,Snow75,2020/04/08,"I came here to vent, my mental health is seriously deteriorating Guess I’m just another one that’s suffering the effects of the pandemic, and to be honest, I’m anxious and scared to a level I’ve never felt before.

I’m among the “essential workers” in my country, because I’m a government employee whose area is directly related to the prices of essential goods.

I’m scared, because I’m asthmatic, I take care of my elderly mother who is also asthmatic, already has pulmonar calcifications, had cancer before, low blood pressure, and is definitively not among the the healthiest people of her age. The fact that right now I’m the only other person she has contact with makes me fear that if she ever gets sick, it was probably my fault.",8.674035453597497,8.05234184671533,9.52752867570386,61.61379562043796,61.18978102189782,13.084045881126173,40.00938477580814,12.28987398476788,5.322963295099061,591,28,95,18,7,203,90,137,0.20600000000000002,0.75,0.044000000000000004,-0.9682,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,5,11,0,4,10,0,9,4,1,2,3,15,23,5,0,1,3,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,2,0,1,1,2,8,0,1,4,1,10,3,12,18,0,12,0,2,0,0,8,7,0,2,4,60,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082018189478924,0.15087917312466784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19783673864587803,0.0,0.2131431744256488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300227212189655,0.0,0.321088211969204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21578799217997646,0.19236143812509693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17066263817138164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21230598146343807,0.0,0.0,0.18115259805210196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857218489754603,0.0,0.0,0.1582472792000192,0.0,0.0,0.2078410585921136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20054717776542166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12593855840570692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19013478559863034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455137830341463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12784754118170688,0.14349188680684127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307998855092644,0.16473919446053292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034179579543903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16112298070626474,0.0,0.0,0.37778277260706417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185621144955868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayaccagain18,2020/04/08,"Noticing a spiral downwards Quarantine hasn’t really been helping me mentally and I’ve realized that now that has had the side of effect of putting a strain on some friendships. I desperately want to find help but my mom says therapists/psychiatrists aren’t available. It feels like I’m stranded with no end in sight. I live in Alexandria, Virginia.",5.2019047619047605,8.074016730158732,5.174841269841268,76.66321428571429,72.17460317460319,8.644444444444442,34.3095238095238,9.2995712137729,3.7310761904761915,286,15,46,7,6,89,54,63,0.09300000000000001,0.748,0.159,0.4748,1,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,9,8,2,0,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,1,0,0,2,3,4,1,7,6,1,8,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,1,3,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26364288090567073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15050839212831804,0.2126519698035889,0.0,0.0,0.272060461261158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3990372143967007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14542410683514598,0.0,0.2628436909051061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2999763568684543,0.0,0.0,0.3486217066851172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3388936301161853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992355889287273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19069185193034166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.236715193609986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17557055757566614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Important-Prompt,2020/04/08,"My mental health struggles I think I have found a great place to speak about my struggles, as well as the fact that I have just came out of therapy, which I feel as made a positive impact on my mental health. 

My trouble started when I was 14. At school I suffered verbal abuse, constantly. These were very personal attacks that really hurt. This hit my really hard and it went on for years before I feel I started to crack. That is when I first started to feel that my thoughts were taking over. This made me feel hollow, like I didn't have a personality and that I was just on this Earth for people to say horrible things to me. This is when I started to feel self loathing and worthlessness and I fell through the cracks. I gave up at school and I wouldn't go outside once I got home. My coping mechanism was to try and act like someone else so that people might respect me. However, this really took over my life and continued until I finally got therapy in my late 20s.

As life went on I felt more and more worthless and that I was a waste of space. I felt so hollow and that I didn't have a personality. The thoughts about who I was got more and more intense to the point where I have punched walls. I was really struggling with these thoughts because they were making me think I didn't have a personality and the I had to act like something else to feel whole. This was making the thoughts more and more intense. Even after leaving school, in college and in the work place, I have had people making fun of me and saying things that made me uncomfortable. My working life basically fell apart because I could not cope. The worst experience that I had with this was at Christmas 2007, during a new job I got two employees were staring at me and laughing at me. I couldn't cope been there anymore and walked out of the job. The next day, standing for a bus a drunken man assaulted me and broke my ribs. This sent me over the edge and I my mental health problems really took over. from the end of 2007 to mid 2008 I became a recluse and self harmed at home. When my confidence to go out slowly returned I went back into society, but the thoughts were getting worse. This continued for many years.

However, in 2015 I decided I had to try and do something and got to therapy. In and out of therapy for four years, at the end of last year I found a therapist that really connected with me. She enabled me to realize that the thoughts I was having were nothing more than just thoughts. She described to me that when I was been bullied I used the excuse to act like someone else as a coping strategy. She enabled me to see that my minds way of coping with the trauma of bullying was to act like someone I am not. This would make me think I was been respected.

In February I ended my therapy. A few weeks later, despite what is going on in the world I live my day just been myself. Whenever I get a thought that I know is intrusive I take the balcony view. I just let it be there and realize that it is just a thought.

After years of holding back I also know that I am capable now of achieving. When this situation is over that we are all facing that the moment, I am going to go to college and learn something that interests me. And most importantly of all I am going to keep my therapy techniques in place and work towards the light I can now see at the end of the tunnel.

Thanks for reading.",4.805235489220564,5.669963347761192,5.433383084577116,82.62665837479274,69.25373134328358,8.8212271973466,30.26202321724709,9.029198982220553,2.383466998341625,2673,103,535,48,45,864,254,670,0.084,0.84,0.076,-0.7108,5,0,3,0,1,0,53.0,1,0,1,7,26,28,2,3,38,0,57,8,2,8,3,96,121,43,0,5,9,0,9,5,0,3,6,3,2,7,41,38,0,2,28,1,0,20,7,15,1,3,58,17,92,13,91,55,13,106,0,5,4,0,19,43,0,2,46,389,133,13,0.0,0.05992535405724993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040446327275551835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05015869266829701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057538523303020235,0.0,0.07778102569180333,0.0,0.061662415498181314,0.0,0.04303721526528207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05784649778424985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05465565926023555,0.0,0.04038153779088631,0.0,0.0,0.06523583052666851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12675152586239793,0.0,0.1791844794026246,0.0,0.0,0.03340556430686817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04947391145634316,0.0,0.0,0.15343919659386493,0.0,0.09712350771670412,0.055404519878217234,0.0,0.04302068383332937,0.0,0.11090991682862153,0.0,0.0,0.05284868372572652,0.0,0.17246410099988393,0.0,0.20225482918034046,0.055761208897517164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04530696653687681,0.0,0.0,0.16128263334369408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10146550551098693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05414361565695352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10037953478396396,0.044955071052660105,0.0,0.0,0.055591481180764166,0.04122692250074012,0.05705294422595425,0.05355363254292366,0.0,0.05171830517328195,0.10717187695924603,0.123546588790551,0.0,0.04466032778630851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357125213090927,0.13504188933165948,0.05127703649018689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529088529356164,0.0536540964661155,0.0510682494021814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0488474835161381,0.05378910509515626,0.0,0.0,0.04852989795890975,0.0,0.0,0.0538627460087712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10519095911019692,0.17664718691839418,0.15852628185196135,0.0,0.04781151676571037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048395261087427935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05059058509941628,0.0,0.194405136772986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044155902861799,0.0,0.1535595636703615,0.08060647942010489,0.0,0.10552547061963947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05685055274720695,0.0,0.0,0.1285609253340368,0.11680970176145945,0.0,0.0,0.1431943556604404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15862186648892182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605506625646632,0.0,0.0,0.04656441270869092,0.3470345459696592,0.0587236771084135,0.0672020877036982,0.09722290262203404,0.0,0.3613716696057264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238558989225383,0.06867678794440138,0.0,0.04940628050143626,0.0,0.0,0.04368220123196155,0.0,0.0417312379160598,0.0,0.04014558768783881,0.04056973704268835,0.0,0.04547470558823598,0.14065587422047873,0.0,0.05646730071602974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046175293089423,0.0,0.051542180244933664,0.035928377410648867,0.0,0.0,0.1628493212935723
mentalhealth,BluehG0,2020/04/08,"I think I'm not scared of dying and that terrifies me at the same time The only thing I'm scared of is pain. I accidentally got one of my fingers cut a few days ago and I almost pass out so... I don't know, I think like I have never felt alive, and I feel empty. Even though suicide is not an option for me I already feel like I'm dead inside.
The only thing that make me feel something are music and self pleasure (and drawing maybe, since I cant play videogames for now due to the cut). In school I feel like I'm not myself, as If I had a mask, pretending to be the version of me that everyone expects from me. I've been struggling with anxiety my whole life, now more than ever. 
I dont enjoy phone calls, going out with ""friends"" I barely talked to, speaking in class and new people, Im scared of taking new classes although I'd like to...

I went to a therapist, we worked on how to approach people and go outside more often and then I stopped going since for the majority of the sessions I'd had to speak to some people (as if we were acquaintances) that the therapist would bring to see how I'do. Then I stopped going because I felt uncomfortable doing so, and, after time I realized that, in order to cope with my anxiety, I had to work on my self esteem. I never did and still haven't, idk how.
I dont see myself in a future, Im about to go to the university this year (If I get to pass) and I dont feel motivated at all, there's nothing I'd like to dedícate my life to, and not in terms of lazyness.
I sometimes feel happy and positive about my life, but then I decay again. And already writing this is really embarrasing for me lol. Anyway I just wanted to get it off of my chest 

Sorry if I made any spelling mistakes ):",3.712878151260505,4.313104464985997,5.283518907563026,83.67637079831933,71.57703081232492,7.854761904761905,27.1999299719888,7.937092434478242,1.5490467787114843,1342,44,282,17,24,456,176,357,0.146,0.8009999999999999,0.053,-0.9684,0,0,1,0,0,1,47.0,2,0,0,4,18,20,2,4,14,1,20,6,2,6,4,65,51,31,3,8,10,0,9,5,1,1,4,2,0,2,10,21,0,2,13,2,0,10,12,10,0,1,11,13,44,10,51,38,10,47,0,0,2,0,11,12,0,8,29,192,54,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769014880069315,0.0,0.08687081029529155,0.0,0.1914686532905216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05899515902234662,0.0,0.13273193937991784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05288395279226528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885847289944515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0559486447954396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003613744129257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050223549136493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05729967830583942,0.07847324692648366,0.0,0.08289641174818617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631901836343857,0.12395302390647688,0.16659337639022215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067025316354137,0.0,0.09064994527718792,0.0,0.2465192479068371,0.0,0.06938446865544068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09235040729324663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18741671167001686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04767729649679951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18382907759876496,0.2119161864308613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820879867547124,0.05790844262826865,0.0,0.08715526183087154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338188504478442,0.16757358539511608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324204661583942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05878622161003391,0.13195945387920915,0.09231153407407834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804312617601182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05557632901995594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26056529815502183,0.08779888202924055,0.1382621559004369,0.0,0.18100504047867494,0.0,0.0,0.14352630682073272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678686093977625,0.08580114489526966,0.09711311819115867,0.0,0.0,0.06928122712925068,0.1450591394885649,0.0,0.09069329327488056,0.0,0.09489393326036306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652276188181146,0.06972894561445014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20145433116100775,0.11526995836771485,0.11117591055645663,0.08523459027357473,0.0,0.10117299108113167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051169292108016816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08042109662354471,0.0,0.09685686300956667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12631474305490736,0.0,0.0,0.06162699270006655,0.0,0.0,0.05586622418186473
mentalhealth,-Melapis-,2020/04/08,"How to help a suicidal person in an abusive family from another country? There is a person I started speaking to online recently because I saw they were struggling: self-harm, suicidal thoughts, and living in an abusive and unaccepting household. This person also recently came out as trans and, in their home, their parent and sibling won't accept them and verbally abuses them. Even after a particularly bad case of self-harm that landed this person in the hospital to get stitches, the next day, this person's family said they should have just died.

This person is living on the brink every day and only feels worse as time goes on. I want to help them in some way, but there are a lot of road blocks:

- This person lives in Belgium (I'm in the US)
- This person is a minor (not even 16)
- This person has no family or friends in their country they can live with as an alternative
- This person has issues making calls to the suicide hotline and services of their country and just can't because of the state they're in
- The school they attend is unhelpful and they can't turn to the school for any assistance for their living situation or mental health issues
- Because of their parent, they don't have access to any therapy and mental help services
- Their family would never, ever consider family therapy
- Lastly, whatever complications are created due to the coronavirus and lockdowns across the world

What can I do? They need help. They need to be treated and live in a safer environment than they are now. I don't speak Dutch or any language other than English, so I'm having issues even looking up what potential help is even out there for this person.

Please help this person.

Note: I tried posting this in another subreddit and got zero responses. I'm very desperate to get some advice to help this person.",7.856311047889996,8.131644891891895,7.8644823771139585,69.89443812233287,62.54354354354354,10.7342500395132,33.4422317053896,10.426177893888326,3.6133879879879895,1451,53,235,31,19,469,163,333,0.107,0.792,0.1,-0.125,2,1,0,0,1,1,40.0,1,0,19,0,14,5,0,1,19,0,25,1,0,2,2,41,43,23,4,5,7,2,1,0,1,3,1,3,1,13,16,17,0,1,4,0,0,2,8,2,0,1,6,6,26,3,44,33,3,39,0,0,2,0,47,21,0,6,13,168,42,4,0.0,0.2007086191403838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517783627268447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04515576989900112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11519627058299027,0.11841886541200188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04714667843131542,0.1032632886547232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057658010023615175,0.06458196131413825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07283168462648218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058602702452279325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14918081089642202,0.051076650673686934,0.04757496671333828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661551852695805,0.0,0.028550862017197524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04362542399858632,0.0,0.059002217569121225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04516094855885587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06002062461985265,0.0,0.0,0.26493537671898554,0.0,0.056639914278563415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17680722732320472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04602725516718681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29916261193161664,0.0,0.04741714527353474,0.0,0.0,0.04800529964531088,0.0,0.0,0.03769143511994928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11380871793608673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0837375174195133,0.043549992803803325,0.0,0.0600521386330726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04294487097745023,0.0,0.0,0.12539742728567885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.640950139482672,0.0,0.0619826156303632,0.0,0.0,0.05407873564293465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150655317168047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05371201343857086,0.0,0.0,0.1142930362279764,0.0,0.0,0.11781252318216152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06347005158205374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03996686356085438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05903043190486326,0.0,0.18529363076052252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12914738420334892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04482762729415871,0.03292572771905413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03833664812990825,0.06141869830477972,0.0,0.0,0.06792154038335918,0.0,0.0,0.0465902914769004,0.033305058227926836,0.044820013143393324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05754358894880179,0.04011176421895761,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ollyb21,2020/04/08,"Corona virus has put my life to a halt and made me depressed Before the corona virus crisis happened, I was in a pretty good place in my life. I'm in my final year of university and I loved my life in my uni city. I have many great friends, loads to do as everything I want to do is basically on my doorstep, constant nights out were so fun etc. One of the best aspects is the fact the gym is a 5 min walk away as it's my main hobby and passion doing resistance training. I was in the best shape I had ever been in and I was more motivated than ever to train harder. Life wasn't perfect but the positives definitely outweigh the negatives. Since it's my last year I was always worried about the end looming, so I was more determined than ever to make the most of it for the last few months. Now due to everything that's happened the end has just arrived out of nowhere and more abrupt than ever. I've not even had the chance to give a proper goodbye to most people.

Now I'm at home my life has just taken a nosedive in every single aspect. I can't see any friends and there is literally nothing to do. It's nice being surrounded by my family for once but now I'm 21, approaching 22 its made me realise that I need to leave the nest for good. I'm way more productive and fulfilled just getting on with my own life at uni. This whole ordeal has put me in such a low mindset as I'm struggling to accept how dire this whole situation really is. I don't even have the motivation to get on with my assignments and do home workouts because it's just not the same. I've been home a bit over 2 weeks now and already it feel like forever, I really don't know how I'll get through the coming months with life like this.

Overall I feel so angry at life right now over how everything good about it feels like its been snatched away from me. Its really affected my mental health for the worse and it feels like I can't snap out of this mindset. Does anyone else feel like this?",5.458128497632374,5.1172681856435664,6.185682307361173,81.99986870426173,67.63861386138615,9.402324580284118,30.188979767541966,8.964715089967882,2.1938597933706414,1553,51,328,24,23,511,189,404,0.08,0.735,0.185,0.9923,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,5,25,22,0,1,24,0,33,11,0,9,6,53,59,21,0,2,8,0,5,5,2,0,9,0,3,0,18,17,0,1,9,2,0,5,8,3,0,1,15,6,32,19,56,43,17,56,0,2,1,2,4,26,0,2,29,218,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484666762553889,0.0,0.06397610649987429,0.0,0.0,0.05228576650079407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05376114719660054,0.07877977228321069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14447565185022998,0.0,0.0,0.046869574608452584,0.0,0.06542513638232891,0.0,0.16137623309918336,0.0,0.08394064217176345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623130437363199,0.0,0.08308748461361612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06622262235524619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728429314070987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422918564083915,0.0,0.13619804313838066,0.0,0.08574927985069443,0.10156621831750316,0.27819461348027585,0.0647805763572338,0.0,0.20730311448379976,0.0,0.07248217915156557,0.0,0.19438177520062944,0.21971222630611045,0.0,0.08422590185926747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11880534262842862,0.0,0.12051078301892874,0.07375697400561604,0.0,0.19346739191010992,0.0,0.08476814018927863,0.0,0.0,0.13598176215764382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172723860477513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313716568987711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04225506013258695,0.12534626186237047,0.0,0.08141218457775941,0.0,0.0,0.4344602455147033,0.1878154144353729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06939347946437906,0.1455045932277732,0.05132264002440263,0.07795130528248749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748396742766972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12274086912867975,0.0,0.0,0.05701070348451896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215319954028877,0.0,0.07377510772969306,0.0,0.0,0.08188209859371116,0.05210059109090452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0533037341717011,0.0,0.0803305042424125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822167539430487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15458525376998686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147767258039326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656610401383765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06126894917401887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360168435436875,0.08642415974105244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037894013578717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04534991859513887,0.0610292867100165,0.06167407818215188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168308068800472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808243578271444,0.0783543765827169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902535737712154
mentalhealth,kuhluhmuh,2020/04/08,"Having a small dick is eating me inside out. Functioning is hard day to day now knowing full well that my shit genetics are to blame for my shit life.  I can’t be normal because I’m not normal.  I’m literally half of the desirable size (4’’) and I just can’t shake the feeling that I will never find a sense of worth.   Women despise what I am because of something I cannot control.  Virtue signalling online doesn’t make anything better because it’s common knowledge that size is everything when it comes to physical standards for a guy.  Women advertise solely for 8+in and dildos weren’t made in my size for a reason. I’m not depressed, but definitely heading that way.  Just needed to vent.  Life sucks",3.697888888888887,5.9161541407407405,4.705648148148146,81.36291666666669,74.25925925925927,6.87037037037037,27.546296296296298,7.793537801064563,1.8925185185185187,559,22,98,8,12,182,89,135,0.156,0.77,0.07400000000000001,-0.8690000000000001,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,5,8,4,1,6,0,13,7,4,4,1,23,23,4,0,4,5,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,7,4,1,1,5,0,1,2,8,6,1,1,2,2,9,2,13,19,1,13,0,1,0,1,3,4,4,0,6,61,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14799742257592707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3288962201625095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15905862218513458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492086886426748,0.0,0.0,0.2017118844004646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23197078161835502,0.0,0.15490056085667886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18402672051641625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16163342957848004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909352270508782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643754176528424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17807519983251394,0.0,0.0,0.16110613378363453,0.0,0.18457324359649926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988383165870188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25406021879933355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701740454893014,0.12004818658159958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335306924592372,0.13870784291180194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3524205720186862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18491100216578588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3692173928904707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13845375871641386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275289023367566,0.0,0.0,0.16170259371274975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pettroni,2020/04/08,"The psychological damage of ""desire for success"" I didn't know how to title my post. 

Past few days I'm thinking that in the desire for success we all experience in 21st century, there is something very dark and damaging for our mental health.

We live in a world where you are expected to be better and better, and to have more and more, to consume more and more. 

For me it feels like I can't truly relax and enjoy the things I have right now in my life, which by the way are more than enough. I got my own apartment, my car, my family is okay everything seems normal, but then there is this anxiety in me about the future. What will it happen if I don't continue to improve myself... if I ""settle down"" and take it easy.

Do you have similar thoughts? It's like I'm always looking towards the things I don't have, rather than appreciating the ones I do, and it's always competition about me, always trying to do more and more and at the same time I realized... life is kind of passing me by while I pursue things I'm not sure I truly want, but that are ""supposed"" to be wanted.

I don't know if you can relate in what I wrote, I hope it's not too confusing, but I would like to see your thoughts on that.",5.9679748822606,5.068690061224494,6.835102040816327,79.62533751962323,66.75510204081633,9.824175824175825,29.45839874411303,9.057496981413335,2.128852433281004,935,26,197,14,13,313,128,245,0.08,0.7709999999999999,0.15,0.9482,0,0,1,0,0,0,34.0,3,4,0,4,9,16,0,1,9,1,24,3,0,1,2,43,43,19,0,12,9,0,1,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,16,12,0,0,8,1,0,2,7,3,0,1,5,3,32,13,30,34,12,26,0,2,2,0,8,14,0,6,11,151,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36916851512192655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313530223129585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26159304310218945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537669483221854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528097103739773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291382802644972,0.14466461504460645,0.13941735393685611,0.0,0.0747775330963824,0.10565251203030364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11828099352971295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13077847331305112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15719995568866274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14688795373461055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15400448244880433,0.16255274725693095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20891789723153106,0.21675447743682905,0.0,0.13058941443660427,0.0,0.12419019600500858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14903814755218947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449006168601127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100213964776791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14117756068762227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416375604321244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262970923334391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11784903368414985,0.13463333149570625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11385280336895792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13938439864518593,0.0,0.11119473433885006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2947542612360882,0.09476182070724162,0.0,0.23481598430212866,0.0862357393185188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040747535439803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220245840838536,0.17445848692173396,0.11738804993669208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505668006208273,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,landseeking,2020/04/08,"How do I recover from trauma when the trauma never ends? Hi guys,
I've been in cancer treatment for 4 years now since I was 17. There have been up and downs and cancer came back twice. Now tgey found something again and I would like to know how one can be able to mentally recover from traumatic health issues like that when the threat hangs over their heads like Damocles Sword all the time. I know that PTSD can be treated as soon as the trauma is over. How about this?",5.210645161290323,5.872967430107527,4.665752688172045,89.2186290322581,68.24731182795699,7.920430107526883,24.10215053763441,7.793537801064563,0.9219763440860204,373,8,78,4,6,112,65,93,0.226,0.705,0.069,-0.9593,0,0,1,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,12,8,1,0,4,0,11,4,1,3,2,13,15,10,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,4,0,2,5,0,5,4,13,7,1,18,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,14,54,8,0,0.23269924318435325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17893135434170018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26614594241718104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20610246066672025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25514270931196903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23040883567540696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23881655724043044,0.2473484139977872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24287755272307746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557708368863411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34105528838126403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345061056837238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17947200179707562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768302948546606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27201296271699377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19249121860972573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17914324605973567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568880001853953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653028658907134,0.0,0.0,0.14985068326634968
mentalhealth,dizzinessfreedom,2020/04/08,"Depression and love life I am really into a guy..we once had a really strong connection, but did not really date. I unintentionally pushed away because of high anxiety and depression due to a personal situation. I still really wanted to be with him, but whenever he made a move, those things got in the way of me getting closer to him. So I understood when he started dating someone else. I knew I had missed my chance and I accepted that.

Over the year or so that he’s been with this girlfriend, he’s still tried to make a move on me. The last time he did was about three months ago and I was extremely caught off guard. He tried to make a move and there was a really strong feeling with it (serious feelings, not just looking for fun), but again my depression won. I sat back and didn’t take the bait. (For context, years of verbal abuse have made it extremely difficult to get close to anyone, but I’m working hard to get better). He obviously wouldn’t know why I acted the way I did, so I assume he felt rejected.

I’m wondering if it’s now too late to reach out and show my interest, because I’ve never stopped wanting him. And I’m pretty certain that at least as of a few months ago, there was still some interest on his part. I don’t want to miss a chance with someone great and I feel like its on me now to show more effort. I just don’t know the best way to go about it and if he’ll want to give it another chance after being rejected. It’s tough for me because I never wanted to reject him but I also don’t know how to express that. And yes, he’s still with the same girlfriend. 

Feeling stuck..can’t decide between trying or letting go.",3.5042342342342323,4.791044324324325,4.912908108108109,83.56384864864866,72.72372372372372,8.571243243243243,26.23291291291293,9.065960079200117,1.9837556516516512,1292,43,266,27,25,432,170,333,0.11199999999999999,0.695,0.19399999999999998,0.9801,0,2,0,0,1,0,38.0,0,0,0,7,22,24,0,0,16,1,20,2,0,5,4,65,60,27,0,8,13,0,6,1,2,2,1,0,0,1,14,19,0,2,14,2,0,8,9,11,0,1,20,7,29,13,42,35,7,50,0,8,1,1,21,13,0,7,27,172,43,1,0.0,0.10873057434849276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16269433876803982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338717416264992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09622719222340424,0.07020259188245109,0.0,0.0,0.06416661459806712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621945358770572,0.07056425222623676,0.0,0.16782353542110234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09630529754783504,0.08116171204743285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371200229862908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07666074136944827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18560348660083067,0.06555937923121068,0.08811207662359984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14383563915793554,0.08803263270463252,0.10430821840061738,0.0,0.07339559052258665,0.10117500956274808,0.0,0.09086516589319676,0.0,0.0,0.08220648123056967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695837660171376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130057484249362,0.07480351234710733,0.1035187775116704,0.0,0.0,0.0938394293081568,0.06481875058900897,0.04483341573638472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706236226882587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282458400908632,0.1736670001060808,0.12251226896472985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649735832478294,0.29260592963797194,0.0,0.0,0.1415549292514915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977303747579968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099376258589331,0.0,0.0,0.08012864668406099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336147682798797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29394600596810816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10315155161749526,0.0,0.0,0.1555101728392415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495416163727437,0.0,0.29314552238094144,0.0767225101652965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899843285262816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609668620936323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053510905028410716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18691420472386008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706369655679518,0.21852450647281896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280672746566613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09951893941145012,0.06680850439500165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11819171043759664
mentalhealth,cynicalsunshyne,2020/04/08,"I miss hugs This lockdown  has been hell on my mental health.

I am a single person who is now working from home during the lockdown and when I'm cooped up is when I start going into bad habits that make it worse. 

I miss going out and seeing people, when I'm not around people I start to overthink things and get into a spiral of anxiety that makes things worse. 

I miss human interactions. 

A high five, a handshake and most of all I miss hugs. There is comfort and a recharging effect from a hug that i miss. Especially from my parents. My mum calls me every day to talk and it's not the same. 

It's my birthday on Sunday and I can't see them. 

I miss my friends and our weekly pub quiz night. I miss my weekly anime session with my cousin. I miss dropping in on my parents for a coffee. I miss going into work and joking around with my colleagues. 

This sucks and I hate it. Im on the edge of tears most of the time with only my cat for comfort but it's not the same as a person.  

Sorry for the long post but I needed to get this off my chest before I explode.",0.7354336349924608,2.909162081447967,2.524326923076924,93.36546474358977,84.29411764705881,4.226319758672701,17.805618401206637,5.148860815047168,-0.5469956259426847,824,19,175,3,24,272,114,221,0.141,0.795,0.064,-0.7876,2,4,0,0,0,0,18.0,1,0,1,3,7,20,3,0,14,0,7,5,1,3,1,33,32,16,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,3,14,19,0,0,1,2,0,3,4,13,0,1,1,2,30,7,30,31,6,32,1,9,2,3,14,14,2,2,13,122,44,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10697231651263572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489630898440045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11675520996662475,0.0,0.0,0.11898808908964174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278573359886046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018109985389558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178158337466578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080350876946362,0.0,0.14611456267942693,0.0,0.2384119614622638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380567240353028,0.0,0.1486365712916108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14774186924261642,0.14026449591182347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15104427686495273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12374833020296512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18668001936908926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409193733342016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368483797477134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13122435519020872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063497492249936,0.0,0.0,0.3105373154408559,0.0,0.0,0.19388601449353768,0.2441946009392056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339219292811645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22285853987813664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15653225990978595,0.1979498748168675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11239294589090996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857984525580608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815380930544766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22433214862174936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20360104338724333,0.0,0.28500475679270665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw_away7383,2020/04/08,"A little high and sad. This quarantine making my depression spike, reminding me of old times and making me feel like I'm always gonna be alone. 

Help me out, let's have a conversation. Ask me anything.",2.647307692307692,5.136303410256414,4.2483974358974415,81.96951923076925,79.0,8.002564102564103,22.57051282051281,8.841846274778883,1.8872512820512828,159,5,30,4,4,53,33,39,0.2,0.679,0.122,-0.5165,0,2,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,2,0,6,9,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,5,1,2,6,0,5,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3002103706102817,0.0,0.0,0.2411890120649836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385323291674504,0.0,0.2709825242788169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24965834490483896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656330586222746,0.2070779924747101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19428887810512696,0.3062558891761338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964042805770589,0.0,0.14161228851378152,0.2905186054757522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3869712466505532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041621753359425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902128907762584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatjames6uy,2020/04/08,"Anxiety from Pandemic affecting my work Hello all,

I’ve been dealing with some crippling anxiety and depression with the pandemic and it’s starting to affect my job performance and my manager has noticed. I’m not sure what to do, i can’t turn off these feelings from 9-5 and i also can’t lose my job without having another quickly. My therapist has been helpful and suggested I look for less stressful and more meaningful employment. I’ve been looking for new employment (100 applications to date) and nothing’s stuck yet. A few virtual interviews but i know a lot of things are uncertain for companies. Just needed to vent, maybe get some feed back.",5.254750000000001,7.555934975000002,6.298333333333333,71.28000000000002,70.08333333333334,11.133333333333335,37.0,11.00357731598739,5.1214,527,30,85,19,10,175,84,120,0.128,0.8390000000000001,0.032,-0.7899,4,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,3,5,5,0,2,3,0,10,1,0,2,2,25,20,9,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,9,1,0,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,3,9,1,14,16,7,7,0,2,2,0,5,1,0,4,6,61,13,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502411208340814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19700010770708795,0.2874430364766667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14446192357525464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936877185093229,0.16181382479135684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949936967044791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815533340598843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592659978017398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37286781843013816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324950377476264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3155302220992987,0.2101806426899402,0.0,0.15972200320843122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887426132897671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393046614099408,0.0,0.18144788829380246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18026819131529465,0.21389344646569905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297672459214116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21520667007091185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770670780643546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218133800089179,0.12481376751723995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20435071961168186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18110184387576447,0.0,0.13677300830942996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,literallyIllliterlly,2020/04/08,"Ruminating hard ... I don't wanna self diagnose myself but I think I might have OCD like symptoms if not OCD ? 

So it all started back in 2015 when I had a minor stomach cramp , and it gave me all sorts of irrational thoughts about having different debilitating diseases . And I was so scared that I had a large anxiety attack and my parents gave me some stomach cramp pills in an effort to calm me down . And I did , temporarily but those thoughts came back and tho I had comparably low anxiety than before , those thoughts still scared me but I couldn't get myself to research the disease at that time because I was afraid that I might find out that I have some serious problem . So I avoided that but that made the situation of my intrusive thoughts worse , and eventually I started having intrusive thoughts about this being God's doings , and that I was being tested .... And that I'd go to hell etc .. it really scared me and I was really anxious almost all the time . Eventually those thoughts became lesser and lesser , now fast forward I had scary intrusive thoughts about being falsely accused of a crime based on a show etc which escalated to being obsessed that I might actually be a criminal which also escalated to this being my downfall because I had a dream a while ago that my life would crumble down and I would be subject to hell . Which is my current obsession ..... I've been witnessing multiple signs of these being true because I saw anime like death note , hell girl and Babylon 

And my dream was similar to all 3 anime combined ..... It really scared me to no end because I saw Babylon and hell girl after the dream . I've also been noticing multiple other signs here and there and things I perceive as signs here and there but they all seem real ... For example writings , ads , word suggestions on my keyboard and other Coincidences ......I'm scared shitless and if I really am a criminal them I'm really sorry for everything I swear ....",5.931416666666664,7.313552641666668,6.546000000000002,73.77900000000002,67.02777777777777,9.648888888888887,33.56666666666667,9.888512548439397,3.51093,1541,69,263,35,25,504,174,360,0.28800000000000003,0.6629999999999999,0.048,-0.9987,3,1,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,2,1,18,21,5,9,13,0,35,8,2,1,6,66,56,35,1,7,8,1,1,2,0,5,6,0,0,3,26,21,0,1,11,4,0,3,4,17,0,0,26,3,42,4,29,16,9,27,4,1,2,0,10,10,4,10,18,198,68,3,0.0,0.0,0.08614666269145763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07825318323890594,0.0,0.08839773601698002,0.0,0.0,0.1411918824126529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350649648419789,0.09972909248282977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042904960258696,0.0,0.13576077450239632,0.0,0.21525397000785101,0.0,0.07511813613762575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096659527939987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960038347287752,0.0,0.09223179480166127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.078188168278014,0.0,0.19690676806193436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933863769906171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068455728373126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046121648372611436,0.0,0.05017046192040451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07907981172391172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06235341199413725,0.08625641244585347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353084492526854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28094724748147937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005051685402873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098022350453604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447019139999942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047977093106984,0.28276596274394195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4419087447823989,0.0,0.0,0.08036504002901701,0.09209328042174326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09922825011889104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988200726626941,0.12496734554428494,0.0,0.07049898125603045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175471647686864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058648027547118536,0.05656502316146636,0.0,0.490580491389935,0.10295130582110956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08996289580084184,0.12542041713903768,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shemwell1018,2020/04/08,"What purpose is to me.  ""What is my purpose in life, what is the purpose of being alive?"" 
  
  Purpose is a product of the imagination. When you look into the void of what is and of what has been you won't see purpose, you won't see wonder, truth or any sign of life at all. All that exists within the void is the void. When you step away from the form you inhabit and the intrusive cognitive conditioning that keeps you true to form, what is there? What there is, is a formation. A crystilne structure that reverberates with energy and frequency. What exists is existence itself. There was nothing before us, it was our eyes that gave the world form, it was our lungs that gave the world air, it was our feet that gave the world a foundation. And only life was ever capable of giving the world a purpose. So the real question is ""What is the meaning of purpose to me?""
Is it feeling comfortable or fulfilled? Is it being satisfied or gratefull for the lives we have? Is it understanding what makes the world spin or what makes us tick?

 To me. Purpose is what we create. It is how we immortalize ourselves. We were born a million times and we have lived millions of lives. Before we were blood we were light. Every being that has ever shared our blood has struggled to do what we are struggling to do now...they struggled to create a life.

  And here we are, true to form. Beings created by billions of tiny decisions and accidental precision. The next step in the grand journey is to recognize that we are not alone on our paths. We are not alone within this form.

  There is a river running beneath the skin of every living being. A river of blood that flows with an incredible amount of energy. The river is connected completely. Though smiles and laughs, through fear and pain, through a text or a virus, through a connection of any kind. If you can swim against the current and swim upstream, you can create purpose for the ground beneath your feet.",4.188307773664729,6.305004885245904,4.618887713731713,82.97604177683769,72.55191256830602,7.5641106998061005,27.9266701921382,8.360895534625662,2.053847452846818,1532,59,281,26,31,484,157,366,0.044000000000000004,0.82,0.135,0.9848,1,2,0,0,0,0,50.0,18,9,0,0,12,13,0,4,34,0,49,13,8,3,8,53,63,21,0,1,8,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,31,24,0,1,7,2,0,7,4,5,0,3,12,7,31,8,42,44,8,32,0,0,4,0,33,17,0,8,8,227,62,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2414131567049029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851064602205034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949886767409724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983442402797367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219633528022543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2108451824166306,0.1963901783463372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114672862623894,0.05892919397384527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118016085513848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035915005153042,0.0,0.12136479559134172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292797390011885,0.0,0.0,0.4116492542938846,0.0,0.0978693445342217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555908112335247,0.0,0.0,0.12695283508072694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239480658734921,0.0,0.0,0.11182909584391776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863853674496969,0.12401323383013613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055826936954482,0.0,0.0,0.13265494096053948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857442544046553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3655177665024143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450592041434668,0.0,0.06795894969186671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213285673672202,0.2803811405653817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263892396000378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lottieeliz,2020/04/08,"Why is it so hard? Hi, I’m (F) (17) and I was diagnosed with severe depression, panic disorder and generalised anxiety in early December. 

It was a massive step to be able to actually get a diagnosis, after having friends become angry with me for isolating myself when it is all I knew how to do in order to hide how I was feeling from them. I was consistently told by them I needed help, so I went and got the diagnosis. 

When I was diagnosed with severe depression, I remember feeling relieved that I knew but also shocked because I’d never actually thought that I was that bad. The truth is, I was bad. My thoughts are and were constantly intrusive and I was constantly trying to think of ways to end my life. The doctor told me he was so glad I didn’t and told me I reminded him of a princess (: 

Part of this, I believe, stems from my one year physically and emotionally abusive relationship with my ex boyfriend. He controlled every aspect of my life. Once we broke up, I would not leave my bed. I refused to eat. I refused to go anywhere. I would only sit and cry. I knew these to be typical symptoms of heartbreak, so it couldn’t possibly be depression. I let it hurt. 

Once these types of episodes became more often, I knew something wasn’t right with me. I think I was left traumatised from that relationship, the anxiety and panic attacks all began when I was 13. It is safe to say I had been struggling for some time but considering the stigma around mental health for that age, I pushed it off as I thought I would be seen as attention-seeking.

One of my worst triggers is actually the mentioning of mental health AT ALL. I don’t know why. I don’t know what it is. When my school would have mental health conferences I would be sent into panic attacks. Unable to breathe, blurred vision, racing heart, all in that tiny hall with my peers around me. Counselling is another massive trigger, having tried it and bawling every time I was in there I figured it wasn’t for me. 

This virus has been good in some aspects. I’ve been able to focus on self-care, I’ve even started working out.. but it is so important that I’m able to be out, distract myself from this constant pain and wanting to stay in bed which obviously isn’t possible. But I’d like to note particularly during this time I am becoming quite irritable. Not sure why or what it is, but it seems that even those closest to me are angering me. 

I just wondered why is everything so hard? I’ve really only ever had obstacles thrown my way, and forgive me for my negative outlook but I really am doing my best to try and look at this positively through what I am doing about my self-care and such. 

I just wanted to let anyone who is struggling during this difficult time of isolation that you are being thought of and I know exactly how you’re feeling. Please, hang in there. You’re needed more than anything even if you don’t think so. I hope we all can move past this together. Thank you for reading (:",4.2498295454545465,5.82595124305556,5.433162878787879,79.4258522727273,71.29166666666667,8.778030303030304,30.27840909090909,9.279504587578698,2.747029166666667,2340,99,442,51,44,777,263,576,0.209,0.685,0.106,-0.9971,0,1,1,0,0,1,69.0,2,3,2,4,29,33,3,6,9,0,65,13,2,6,11,97,104,40,0,12,12,1,5,1,1,5,10,1,2,0,37,28,1,4,22,1,0,7,12,21,0,2,37,8,73,12,68,52,12,54,0,6,2,0,26,21,0,9,22,318,110,5,0.18806412518996415,0.07427507862559328,0.18352345760920175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05013160432290579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0657338776249415,0.09591236067745043,0.0,0.0,0.04383293634717789,0.0,0.0515869169764604,0.11161129555266798,0.0,0.1426333948148052,0.0,0.0,0.10468379272657534,0.03821404838923367,0.13846803388293522,0.0,0.0706279560724265,0.06578723225079475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032305083258742,0.0703099692725643,0.0,0.0,0.06885987023672678,0.0,0.0,0.16197935545305406,0.12725408556605208,0.0,0.0,0.07184592685980225,0.06416386703041345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641455167765524,0.0,0.07051560936649412,0.05552299817620264,0.0,0.0,0.12421458101296425,0.05670492270289459,0.10563475774116952,0.0,0.0563399697586482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509087239075208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04843262553617775,0.0,0.032751914450412416,0.0,0.035627058761640795,0.052579755189119136,0.050137353633067976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123123444076346,0.0,0.0,0.19990337080196727,0.0,0.07428563128118874,0.04201847296440395,0.0,0.0,0.0622633701413733,0.0,0.0,0.06710884521687012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335512490263464,0.0,0.0,0.06637758475338625,0.06811074076236663,0.12820553982736804,0.08855683555907011,0.030626210693975295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052642166666438985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18952440503717224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662746751285614,0.0,0.0929647772509872,0.0483488823773539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13352143705216307,0.08495807891102321,0.09535416113400824,0.06670449623627912,0.22065273023101886,0.0,0.06788504028850617,0.059842829131048235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06881264495390342,0.0,0.1413426959984216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667644880342251,0.06270500600437094,0.0,0.0803191295025583,0.0,0.0,0.1346069929466128,0.07101333097667839,0.053535245115769035,0.0,0.04985204689744386,0.0,0.06344364498556801,0.0,0.05706883879279057,0.13079459855653874,0.14163928742644666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04826031718436352,0.0,0.0,0.0443709185900656,0.0668171115748091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107030449857532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05908273744801345,0.06515687817993948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05771472642094744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050389772517885,0.0,0.19906921124559707,0.14621560502653427,0.0,0.0,0.17970333093004026,0.0,0.12768319615059026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395006240700594,0.09951769927420658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05811244272831394,0.2262648286406549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798250716334578,0.04563764099040489,0.0,0.0,0.22265893118599614,0.0,0.0,0.04036904356593024
mentalhealth,FenderTelecaster04,2020/04/08,"Has anyone felt this sense of reality at a young age? 
Hello, I’m 15 going on 16 and here’s a problem that’s haunted me the entirety of my life at this point.

Some background, I grew up in an old town in New York. My mother has raised me right and taught me right from wrong which translates how I treat people with respect to this day. I have one sister that has a mental disability that can’t care for herself and doesn’t have the development past 2 years old. My biological father left me at a young age but I know true to myself that didn’t have any effect on me. I have known my, now, stepdad since 2012-13 so about when I was 8-9.

Around the age of 6, maybe 7, I noticed that I wouldn’t enjoy childhood activities like other kids would. I’d have negative thoughts of reality and the dark truth of the world didn’t seem to effect my friends. I’d always put it away and just act like they would but whenever family or friends would bring me somewhere, there’d always be someone there or something there that would make me feel bad. I was observant so that could stem out to present-day where I can find a motive for a good majority of what everyone does. I’d cry myself to sleep over these bad thoughts and I unknowingly taught myself the first few years to occupy myself to distract my isolated mind. Again, due to not having a sibling that I could necessarily interact with at my age, I’d have some time to myself. I got attention from my parents and received normal care. This time to myself would be nightmarish. Total isolation in my mind and I’d be stuck on things that had happened days, weeks, months ago and think; “why did this person act like this?” or “Why can’t I be happy like everyone else?”. Again, I’d counter this by occupying myself.

A few years pass and I move to California when I was a few months away from turning 10 and I still have this issues. Around this time, to me it was like “alright, these thoughts will go away when I’m older”. Nothing new for the next few years. When I got into 7th grade is when it was different, except I realized the thoughts were something everyone would have if they were idiotic enough to overthink things like myself. But now it was something different, I realized so many were so distanced from reality. Here I am, 10th grade spending half of it in quarantine having these godawful thoughts more and more with time to myself. I still feel now that people don’t have the same sense of reality as I do but I don’t speak of it to anyone because it feels as if it’s a curse. I am a sympathetic person and that would explain why I’d feel gloomy if I’d think about something bad happening. I feel so much more awake then everyone else, I know other people are intelligent but I don’t know what my issue is that I am more aware of everything around me. Everything including personality, ways people respond to events, etc. Any help or recommendation to another subreddit would be great. Thanks for your time.",5.27707894736842,6.074115584482758,5.865390199637022,80.19599818511799,68.15517241379311,9.208711433756807,29.22867513611615,9.345792617884785,2.36798275862069,2349,81,465,45,38,762,253,580,0.086,0.778,0.135,0.9845,3,2,4,0,0,0,55.0,0,1,2,4,29,27,1,1,21,1,58,2,1,5,3,86,93,39,0,16,15,4,6,6,2,10,1,1,0,4,39,21,0,0,26,0,1,10,11,7,0,3,24,7,61,20,65,52,16,84,0,0,0,0,21,28,0,11,51,314,100,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05598367235350842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510111872740126,0.0,0.0,0.08589601420592757,0.06622420474769962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831979661723102,0.0,0.0,0.16866575248326854,0.0,0.0,0.1780104339230094,0.0,0.15819698701282822,0.03849909751569084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12878278676804086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008492936051615,0.0,0.06937351500053207,0.12219050684305588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196842267715053,0.0,0.0,0.05526793414573388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551688177234413,0.0,0.0,0.06525666811297888,0.07043524321376682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413917168507157,0.11352045026354075,0.0,0.059537525284102985,0.0,0.159666969056991,0.0,0.060639327286191515,0.0,0.05772311913714609,0.05372016288073898,0.0,0.0,0.0975877956957618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717856216379362,0.05297196208469143,0.10102268396362747,0.06962932611686734,0.0,0.0,0.11169666388903994,0.06723036286569857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04233190034303631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183617866277658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412607928486303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06861879756281107,0.0,0.04460870270984143,0.18512796027792336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04215688620109303,0.06402991553937967,0.06344833824000852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06364603994853618,0.0,0.12753840392439314,0.0,0.10082047317949193,0.06712446016904235,0.04642666888735045,0.0,0.0,0.1219922389410365,0.06716674932727025,0.0,0.06187912692632488,0.060599548650561635,0.07190312511908302,0.13254245966128192,0.0,0.04279590232662643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012687438364798,0.0,0.06028921329832576,0.17513670025558062,0.16543523036113406,0.0,0.0,0.05970250213083076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060431426853758574,0.0,0.06348887107570686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786915854846103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057494531001062166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052243005586815015,0.0,0.06320125937724863,0.0,0.05351157655388436,0.19448121680218985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087236594182336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058145236483174725,0.0,0.0,0.08391561397198245,0.0809351796890409,0.0,0.25069265424502674,0.1841328344387815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869521064437907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05013001462015089,0.050659652236246265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17096445030138174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3589116889016873,0.06905078797583998,0.0,0.16268066958305194
mentalhealth,GELID_ICE,2020/04/08,"I was robbed yesterday and I keep thinking about it. So long story short I was robbed on a delivery yesterday and while nothing of mine was taken, just the food, I am having elevated heartrate, and I keep flashing back to it. 

Is this normal? Am I suffering minor PTSD because the event? I wasn't harmed, only held up at gun point. I am trying to relax but I keep feeling my heart beat in my chest and start to sweat.",2.2002710843373485,4.370922927710847,3.6682981927710863,87.2417243975904,78.75903614457832,6.559638554216868,23.62801204819277,7.645422480735847,1.1834349397590365,325,11,65,5,8,107,58,83,0.049,0.875,0.076,0.2702,0,0,0,1,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,0,3,0,9,4,3,0,0,13,17,7,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,4,2,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,6,1,12,1,9,11,0,13,0,1,0,0,0,6,0,0,7,45,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18088798983477936,0.0,0.14340245951524375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894635221921758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28445778134453825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787650793723879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6272865930940514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208183392957923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23048901315866865,0.22572280605960776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17891353844993468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22238146339107984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749874565914061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665067985458125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15073475195082636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15971512343891994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nobody29845,2020/04/08,"Thought broadcasting please help 
I always am terribly paranoid that everyone in the world can hear my thoughts and then once I start thinking about it I subconsciously begin thinking terrible and offensive things without meaning to, this sometimes also happens when I look at some one(this also makes me think I have thought insertion) and then I get more anxious and panicky because if they can hear my thoughts, then they’re hearing these terrible things running through my head. This then makes my brain think more like that and it just spirals out of control. I’ve always been super paranoid cos I swear I whisper when I speak or speak under my breath when I don't want to, I have heard people laugh right after my thought and sometimes say shit on purpose to get a reaction out of them and I have done sometimes 
I have complex ptsd I've not always been like this but it's been going on for about a year now and I don't want to tell anyone about it or can't please help! I also whisper when I type anyway without knowing, someone please get me back to normal please I can't take it anymore!",4.319813928761299,6.548942866028707,4.069433811802234,86.56742557150456,72.49282296650719,6.366932482721957,31.228335991493893,7.1686216300943375,1.9406361509835202,885,41,160,9,18,268,114,209,0.10099999999999999,0.777,0.122,0.8502,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,2,2,14,9,2,0,3,0,15,4,4,4,0,38,43,23,0,4,8,0,0,2,0,0,0,9,0,0,13,10,0,1,12,0,0,2,7,5,0,0,10,10,27,4,22,33,3,25,0,0,1,0,12,9,1,4,16,111,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287459533217717,0.2380080575339734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771453213921063,0.09455821862898524,0.06666856797590028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07331565917387743,0.0,0.05812240965316929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643835192415567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693933275891992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757268763410007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110777368197344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494440083308797,0.0,0.05418767681952857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431469403672649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978531313314812,0.0,0.3223876836546215,0.0,0.12781764830369394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052400004383709634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316307688462648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006714035771226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12728920767471658,0.0,0.0,0.10386041220153244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934194356822646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10154102992150038,0.06460933182891955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610133544955459,0.0,0.0,0.41864779136624464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111455087001418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142548561743622,0.0,0.07582345273416727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978719269716068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078687487113644,0.0,0.2829007115960052,0.0,0.06748682266560911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168878613403731,0.0,0.0833371413929744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668810456112478,0.24437703597192434,0.0,0.3784727977358746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247580411575513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18382146288450327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0614000920171203
mentalhealth,Kili12345,2020/04/08,"What goes wrong in this kind of short memory problem ? I noticed that I'm very easily tired and sometimes feel like I don't process information right. After brain scans the neurologist said that i might have comorbidity of Adhd and a filter disorder, something subclinical but in the direction of psychosis (which is scary).. Then he wanted to have neuropsychological tests done to confirm his brain scans. But all my working memory and visual perception tests there were more than ok except one which was slightly below  . I thought this was especially odd as my most prominent functional problem in everyday life was that I dont remember what I just said after 2 or three seconds unless cued. ""Can you repeat what you just said"" was even at school - often to the surprise of teachers - answered by "" no sorry , just lost it"".  Its so odd that this didnt show in the tests. 

My question is how i could tackle this problem outside atypical neuroleptics. My physician said that due to my concurrenr treatment of autoimmunity, these meds right now are ""out of the question"". I would at least like to tackle this specific quick dissolution of thoughts from accessibility (but not from availability when cued) because that lone causes so much trouble.",9.375555555555557,9.776990629629632,8.692962962962962,64.79833333333333,59.37037037037037,11.644444444444444,38.83333333333333,11.20814326018867,4.625016666666665,1000,45,156,24,12,316,141,216,0.151,0.78,0.069,-0.9547,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,0,2,12,12,0,0,6,1,18,5,2,2,1,35,28,14,0,6,10,0,1,2,0,2,3,4,0,0,19,4,0,0,9,1,0,0,5,7,0,3,14,7,16,5,29,11,5,20,0,2,2,0,11,11,0,6,11,118,35,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940912062746994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578464256006336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27756565852615256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277114322906947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925982895036832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14248210058792352,0.0,0.0,0.12722306766185118,0.14570273790969096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211253905834692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06286019652123594,0.08881461308207328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12946070338273044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781126852533698,0.12147346477250075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571054675214528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809208527545058,0.0,0.0,0.13188443850979695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09138989570984836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415397499611606,0.0,0.0,0.08424281009540359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568738785349571,0.0,0.0,0.27853489642789103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14083092820344256,0.21233811053669915,0.4730291811527227,0.0,0.0,0.1258190157966471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570801948015267,0.1229561852661522,0.13916665758552302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19739323174159848,0.0,0.14288816353591408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10257745900826194,0.07332747095683613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905068281306923,0.0,0.0,0.08831373918231883,0.13592498585471974,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fursdxnr,2020/04/08,"What was I experiencing? What was I experiencing?

So how do I start...? 
In the last few weeks I’ve been feeling very healthy mentally and physically. I might have to say that I have been occasionally smoking potent weed on the weekends. But I wasn‘t experiencing any negative effects.
But yesterday something weird happened to me that happened one time before in January when I was trying to sleep (drunk) after a night out.

I was watching a movie and went to bed. I fell asleep but woke up a short time after. 
I was awake but I didn‘t really know what my situation was or who I really was. I didn‘t realize I was just lying in my bed and that everything was ok. I was convinced that I was in danger and that I had to solve a problem. I was feeling like a different person in a different situation. I had to solve the problem that was also appearing in the film I watched. This state lasted around 2 minutes. 

I tried to calm myself down and looked around my bedroom to convince myself that there was nothing to worry about and I tried to go back to sleep. I figured that would solve the problem.
Today I woke up and everything was fine and I feel mentally great like most of the time.

Does anyone know what I was experiencing?",3.332143133462281,5.674325612765959,4.945270793036752,78.63295454545455,75.85106382978724,7.847195357833655,27.27756286266924,8.710501217029153,2.3157659574468084,969,39,178,21,22,326,117,235,0.096,0.733,0.171,0.9356,2,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,10,13,1,0,12,1,28,4,3,2,0,33,42,17,0,4,6,0,3,2,0,2,0,1,3,1,14,11,1,0,8,3,0,4,4,5,0,1,26,11,32,8,28,14,2,34,0,0,3,0,3,14,0,4,17,138,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687263539554423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237682097675357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08470130007660882,0.0,0.0,0.2156739343599613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314631822069093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307804796291826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531232497796149,0.0,0.0,0.10600717062291684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21773894621328824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18375042121571605,0.08653977910292063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06884453669987818,0.0,0.0,0.13355317089591684,0.0,0.0,0.21424081594354336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13314665756506444,0.19748446402492634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836213032380448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101723962095092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441537473974228,0.12850644482573606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367818814208408,0.0,0.1162335229779473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820850750081918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577152293341743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3477331662468441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520599934268844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633242797719686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27232449714386064,0.24244751644672696,0.0,0.0,0.0932566227196932,0.0,0.0,0.08574087896837643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119066084087376,0.0,0.11482302465855307,0.0,0.0,0.24673073750369345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995011333676196,0.0,0.0,0.09716821302103833,0.0,0.0,0.11229454058768687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12301976741230022,0.0,0.08605173422900879,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MotherNootz,2020/04/08,"I think there might be something wrong with me. Hi im Mo little background information about me, im 15 and im a female thats really all i think you need to know thats relevant. 

I have always been extremely interested in behavioral changes in humans that are caused by things as illnesses or basically any other thing. A couple months ago i began working on a traumatized dream character and since yesterday I’ve been really trying to get some videos of woman shown having episodes of paranoia, mental breakdowns or woman that are in a constant state of shock. I know some girl my dad talked about me and she experienced a state of shock and i really want to try and get that shock to air so i can see how she experiences the stuff. 

Im scared that i might harm her some day when i meet her, good for her that shes been getting better since im less interested in her now since its not the thing im looking for.",3.91,5.442655384615384,5.105274725274729,81.61472527472529,72.07692307692308,8.716483516483517,25.637362637362642,9.23628265651192,2.0335450549450558,728,23,145,16,14,241,107,182,0.13699999999999998,0.779,0.084,-0.8696,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,2,7,10,0,1,7,0,12,1,0,2,1,24,24,11,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,13,6,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,6,0,0,4,3,21,4,20,17,5,17,0,0,2,0,17,7,0,7,8,90,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502638838510094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08919904061342578,0.0,0.0,0.07289971936034575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09480974481865803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012399503275216,0.11340345316956167,0.0,0.0,0.11584518533543295,0.0,0.0,0.11861483150222445,0.0,0.06913517264415336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486223237451026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16802282628565854,0.0,0.0,0.08991432735593438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6947667864921512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782870296731104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074426262909748,0.0,0.0,0.09002105447899382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10803245048186316,0.22744465379249226,0.0,0.0,0.0855660680941704,0.0,0.0,0.0794874889037765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20602531745520192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732596496237252,0.0,0.08542457152696477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26603100139356434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08252784635471372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12271842554180055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08616335053289319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21365687680837028,0.13737894453554458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556361290567513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06322937502599184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07804292311754712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11720644110404127,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,warriorh666,2020/04/08,Is it just me or did everyone's mental health has gotten severely worse since the quarantine? My mental health is falling like snow.,3.765000000000001,6.9601155000000015,4.24666666666667,78.86500000000002,81.5,8.200000000000001,24.66666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.726766666666668,108,4,17,3,3,34,21,24,0.264,0.6509999999999999,0.086,-0.6369,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,10,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2677877936680713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.595778412529364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13691441356775907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5648456487533497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165990753789538,0.0,0.2318230199975552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28559539568520026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hmbhmsi,2020/04/08,"I have wasted my life. I am 31 years old, Indian, with bleak future prospects. What do I do now? 
I have wasted my life. I am 31 years old, Indian, with bleak future prospects. I did not make use of the opportunities that I received. I always wanted what I did not have and neglected what I did have. I have no work experience. I recently graduated with a PhD in an engineering field with low prospects (mechanical engineering: stress analysis).

 And on top it; I am a mediocre researcher who is not suitable for getting employed in industry or academia.
I am a bad son to my parents, a disappointing friend, a useless scientist to the world and a person incompetent of finding love. I don't know what to do next. I feel miserable.",3.4699606962380685,5.89817615328467,5.229489051094891,76.33992139247616,75.78832116788321,8.886917462099943,30.246490735541833,9.466822959209583,3.19681179112858,571,27,105,16,13,194,77,137,0.2,0.655,0.145,-0.8452,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,4,1,10,0,2,9,0,17,3,0,2,0,18,24,4,0,1,4,2,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,7,7,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,3,1,19,3,13,21,0,16,0,5,0,1,7,6,0,1,9,74,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18172391202685506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823524855486795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136343054803768,0.0,0.0,0.11042815372408613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996110250967217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16873308500081485,0.0,0.11410348920218763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200253540005407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30852071091273325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19711194143155572,0.0,0.14578178371637576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322678310882046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4583421103591014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2425041732289364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19069595460263014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21564082351468647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25017318063713995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18862500350874692,0.0,0.0,0.12881628889410845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899571561980574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28128118944630176
mentalhealth,5redhotburritos,2020/04/08,"I have no medication and my mental health is deteriorating. I’m 16, with an undiagnosed mood disorder (psych wasn’t specific when i saw him, and it was my first time seeing this one and i had already concluded that i didn’t wanna see him again, so i never followed up). Last time i got properly evaluated was when i was 12, where i was diagnosed with some forms of depression, anxiety & ocd (Don’t know specifics cause i was so young, obviously)

Weed is the only thing that is helping me, and i hate it. I love being high, don’t get me wrong. But i have things to do that not normal 16 year olds do. I’m a hip-hop manager, i have things to do even with this pandemic going on, and it makes me so much less productive. Because i need to be high 24/7. That isnt a way to live. 

Today, i woke up and felt terrible, as i did the night before, except worse. I went on my snapchat and posted 5 snaps, and i don’t really remember what i was talking about cause my mind was going so fast. But they were rants that obviously showed how ill i was becoming, they were cries for help and i realize that cause i’m high. I deleted snapchat though, and deleted those snaps i posted to save myself from embarrassment. I just really want somebody to care, because i have so many friends but all of them seem to know how ill i am and rather not be involved. 

I wish i could get diagnosed and get my medication. I genuinely have so much hopes for my future, i’m passionate. I love what i do and i wanna do this for the rest of my life. But it feels like there will be nothing for me if i can’t get this dealt with.

I wont get into specifics of how i feel with this unknown disorder, cause i honestly can’t even properly explain it, either way it would be too much to say. But it’s really ruining my life. I don’t know what to do. I really feel stuck.",3.6230503978779858,4.383594925729447,5.2453713527851455,83.28195623342175,71.89124668435014,9.301326259946947,26.96684350132626,9.565088089820216,2.1539092838196288,1425,47,312,33,26,485,180,377,0.107,0.7959999999999999,0.09699999999999999,0.3631,2,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,3,2,21,16,1,1,6,0,45,12,0,9,4,67,82,32,0,11,12,0,4,1,1,3,9,1,0,0,25,19,0,0,12,1,0,4,14,6,0,2,20,8,56,9,33,53,9,32,0,2,3,3,14,9,0,4,16,219,81,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981239843313222,0.0,0.0,0.09634336229972892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802255364599574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840801490973884,0.09820370593038658,0.07566325510375031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065852947836933,0.3653759492219253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099433772654758,0.0,0.09767300448346264,0.0,0.0,0.07658553647673648,0.1805011950690944,0.0,0.0,0.203817042122546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745991084484896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13487988248349325,0.06352352913437055,0.08537588567990123,0.0,0.0,0.07563419137494358,0.0,0.0,0.06869835849063055,0.0,0.2322817248972193,0.0,0.10106908009543003,0.0,0.07111639840964623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778879641979652,0.0,0.09451640830126536,0.0,0.0,0.11920064572098348,0.2818424304701807,0.0,0.08831632139397028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14660215802468432,0.07248059929268749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12561179925066146,0.043441179951986986,0.0,0.0785168313861262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160505176743302,0.0,0.05935391532195827,0.09014959422923284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17915244874157468,0.08960912453694088,0.0,0.08978252794474502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960964024246848,0.0659320811528108,0.06857957456177416,0.0,0.0,0.08344416603834877,0.08712143592062947,0.08531988017324366,0.0,0.09330520629267712,0.0,0.06025360484891607,0.06762666975657028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17031904918740745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22785435607245794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007275408888489,0.0,0.0,0.07071171036751116,0.0,0.0,0.14171336546253238,0.08094823484435314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146947397734303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772208775853818,0.0,0.08736216040335976,0.0,0.10369840515391993,0.0,0.08428452011091372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05244654653138926,0.14115903288776674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08242851547112329,0.0,0.0,0.10225210399192586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906157405500603,0.06316528541006028,0.09721862764917012,0.0,0.05726072035356816
mentalhealth,AbsurdlyStupid,2020/04/08,"I am angry with myself I know I have depression. I know I have anxiety. I am taking medication, but for some reason, I've been rather angry with myself the last few days. I've been taking my medication for more than a few months and I don't usually get this angry. If anything they definitely lessen it. However, tonight I am just extrodinarily angry with myself. I feel I'm inadequate. I feel that I have been doing everything wrong. I feel like I am a shitty person and that I am ruining everyone around me. I feel like a liar and that nothing that comes out of my mouth is true. However, I know this is my anti-self talking. I know that I have some good in me. I know that despite all of this hate, I'm trying to better myself. The anger still lingers though. I have a strong urge to just punch myself or something. I want to hurt myself but I don't know why. It's very out of character for me.",1.2612637362637358,3.5949649615384662,3.6491098901098944,85.10839010989012,83.45054945054945,6.716923076923077,20.63846153846153,7.908726449838941,1.0442672527472523,701,21,144,14,20,242,91,182,0.262,0.606,0.132,-0.9836,2,0,1,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,1,2,6,13,3,0,6,0,18,3,1,1,2,33,36,8,0,3,7,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,11,10,0,0,11,0,0,1,2,7,0,0,3,4,35,6,17,33,6,11,0,3,0,0,3,4,0,4,8,105,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216107060598128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12065272497670892,0.13051959426800966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967020549180044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262969628720655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09455538626989587,0.0,0.12628040706716182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009816076683562,0.13176927940059052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29653443280569136,0.2094854325364088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660096703296812,0.0,0.0,0.12297479892179353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475324529711395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695578491636228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4834589151936018,0.11951185568743368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.143258639690566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954010012195574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702773437602335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1406822971393749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12801970065921878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15074597855263652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15295278001670473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128723931920708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708796909040868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22047442669478495,0.11784463074795183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440497734367123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954284569434492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614771441283253,0.12097380500309145,0.08647809429738035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322984088889248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16030191128552349,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MissSkyward,2020/04/08,"I don't know if I (23F) should open up to my friend 24M). We've been friends for two years. We play games every night and he's my best friend. The only one in fact.

What makes me so uncertain is because he never asks if I'm ok. I don't *really* hide that I'm depressed. But I don't say it either. It's kind of me just being dead silent when we play games, barely laugh at jokes and just exist. But he sometimes crack a dumb joke that just makes me laugh and he brings the mood back up ~~until he goes to bed and I'm just sat alone again~~. And I don't know what to make of it. 

I'm terrified what will happen if I open up. If he just says ""well this is awkward, I don't really care"", how do I just transition from my position of vulnerability to just being casual friends again? I guess I'm just scared if my best friend doesn't think I'm his either.

I've recently got an appointment with a psychiatrist, but Covid19 is blocking my appointment so here I am asking you guys if my best friend is someone I can confide in, or not.",0.9897651663405114,2.8409673242009132,2.809562948467057,93.49383561643835,81.23744292237444,6.36320939334638,20.01761252446184,7.447530270364453,0.3655064579256355,800,21,188,12,21,266,118,219,0.094,0.7170000000000001,0.18899999999999997,0.9531,0,1,0,0,0,0,30.0,2,1,0,3,17,26,1,3,5,1,18,0,0,4,2,44,38,20,1,7,21,0,0,0,6,2,0,2,1,1,9,10,0,1,3,7,0,1,8,5,1,2,3,2,24,20,17,31,5,18,0,1,0,0,23,8,1,9,9,114,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13123039504759315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23690816303122897,0.0,0.0,0.09742997757391783,0.0,0.07723950289555664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3989140117400541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918638453036282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913268306550704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675623913638044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5873617810242214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133928317859024,0.0,0.13958221137345184,0.12545999987133455,0.11204671473617404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194599903095258,0.13926987248031372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537340205808624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09772436571872577,0.0,0.0,0.11890607737264905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08586004439008485,0.09636649760312532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234369027305906,0.0,0.12510802506070898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20152522347092566,0.126855961898206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073585574439766,0.0,0.12531661174445238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118882583411506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377447477586807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11392494522245032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08159525066912307
mentalhealth,burnerwasfever,2020/04/08,"Web of Lies Hey Reddit,

Let me know if this was posted in the wrong place, but I was just hoping for some input on something that often eats at me and as of recently more than usual.

I've had this terrible trait that is lying often times uncontrollably and generally without even having a reason. This has been going on for as long as I can remember (one of my earliest childhood stories I can think of contains a horrible lie \[granted at the time, I had no idea the scale of what I was claiming, but I also really had no reason to be saying it\].)

It's a trait that I truthfully do hate about myself, I will often times find myself telling somebody a completely fictional story and catch myself half way through the story and think ""WTF am I even doing or saying?"", as if I've got zero control over it.

It's honestly at a point where I've been finding myself laying in bed more and more just thinking WTF is wrong with me, I've got a whole life time of spun webs and pointless fibs that served zero purpose and, well quite frankly it scares me a little.

The funny thing is, I don't like being lied to which also just makes me feel like a larger piece of shit.

​

Apologies for what may be a wall of text, but could real use some input here as I've not really spoken to anybody about this.",10.159961389961387,6.326510575289575,9.910227799227801,70.14186679536681,61.00772200772201,12.52216216216216,37.48301158301158,9.888512548439397,3.529147953667953,1025,30,196,14,10,338,148,259,0.214,0.7170000000000001,0.07,-0.9928,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,2,15,13,2,2,14,0,26,3,1,5,1,45,38,20,0,4,11,0,1,2,0,2,1,2,1,0,17,8,1,2,11,0,0,2,5,7,1,4,10,3,20,6,33,21,7,25,0,0,0,0,5,13,1,10,10,150,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19464154304079345,0.0,0.13185827550486906,0.14787475692413707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275966280272167,0.0,0.1364931473388906,0.09716487695446736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124526060288405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607589865586519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061533485649804376,0.08694011508112975,0.0,0.0,0.22245707700631065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916301388146794,0.0,0.1946638653784984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015025247458035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087223821101227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738071121144005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06688129927861004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444307555790185,0.0859579468522588,0.11890967758723972,0.12197201977586244,0.0,0.10769771064096786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123346260708056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246480337288628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271471032955674,0.0,0.11504267538308473,0.0,0.11655175600791602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294393731745066,0.0,0.1385174368682845,0.15592398760444354,0.25024886102485283,0.12016076581708485,0.0,0.13785858745649335,0.0,0.0,0.1935561301681087,0.12183958241491392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12491986815171507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368803104622206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636824099694428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08084985045179288,0.2339349090503956,0.0,0.0,0.2838491941699564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510683693580727,0.1340316729761036,0.0,0.0,0.09659714070705833,0.0,0.0,0.10941990857066364,0.0,0.0,0.1358699699460731,0.0,0.11731123324898478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661123772884066,0.14787475692413707,0.0
mentalhealth,erivanla,2020/04/08,"I'm struggling 😔 I know how serious the coronavirus is, but I'm struggling.

I can't sleep, I've watched everything on YouTube. I can't focus for long enough to read a book or do my homework or listen to a podcast.

I miss being social, and I'm antisocial, even with my parents and siblings. Going to work was a way for me to express that. Then at a certain time I get to go home and not talk to people again. I don't really have friends, but I'm even worried about people I was friends with back in highschool.

I miss going to the gym. That was the best way to cope with my stress and anxiety. I didn't talk to people at the gym, I didn't need to. It was my time just for me. I've been trying to go for a walk every day, but it's been bad weather for the last couple days now.

I don't know what to do at this point. I know my mental health is deteriorating and I need to find something to do that's productive and get out of this funk. Any suggestions?",1.3219607843137275,2.917424921568628,3.348627450980392,91.24049019607844,79.19607843137254,6.298039215686276,23.098039215686285,7.1686216300943375,0.6744921568627458,740,24,170,9,18,251,103,204,0.158,0.8,0.043,-0.9622,1,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,2,8,11,0,3,10,0,19,2,1,1,1,25,37,13,0,2,7,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,8,10,0,0,4,4,0,5,7,7,0,0,8,2,20,4,30,28,2,24,0,2,1,0,9,7,0,2,10,109,28,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226635131272468,0.0,0.10379403964830304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10432875192965246,0.11328627150923053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238670687200564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15012619815704015,0.0,0.17500342067766975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401926438909079,0.0,0.17922935835023698,0.0,0.11431538287435347,0.0,0.12193950839306505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400811931519512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096504692269691,0.0,0.14177332235440082,0.0,0.3084379384295612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422039904134396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360970681438067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236968385769594,0.11059646828123493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12007161768793392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13673248836615054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2012084721454094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15065543816347335,0.0,0.0,0.2821881398616334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826048069345194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13571568530676195,0.0,0.0869194215763445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577695437946047,0.13830762208421532,0.0,0.10445229874216168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541980017827095,0.2836822341927557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181072311472794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823099544345542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09211711351258063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21539129995792886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877590510660386,0.1377885786788988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,geeksquadassemble,2020/04/08,"Involuntary Breath Holding Feels So Good Sometimes I find myself holding my breath involuntarily. I don’t know why it happens but whenever I do, it feels so good until it doesn’t in that very moment if that makes any sense. Why is that?",2.206666666666667,5.0802628888888925,3.59277777777778,82.6625,86.77777777777777,5.666666666666668,23.055555555555557,7.1686216300943375,1.1432222222222226,190,7,35,3,6,62,31,45,0.0,0.841,0.159,0.8025,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,2,1,0,9,9,5,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,5,2,2,9,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,21,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998378942706516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971733780748535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685867717085572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4929590950756371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598633512275604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150020941258833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19615679366069008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29063944238860256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24246893658311985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5303338935915359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Beenus02,2020/04/08,"help maybe everything seems to be getting worse and worse. I have all these shitty, self-destructive feelings about myself and those around me, and the two people that I considered to be my support people have kinda ditched me. Recently I had what I believe to be my biggest depressive episode, and I think that might've been the reason this person left. I refuse to tell my family about these feelings, for all they know, I'm just kinda sad and I don't want to be a burden on them. My brain does this amazing thing, where I can only be happy for short periods of time, until I think that my problems aren't valid in the slightest, so I revert back to being sad again.   
I do have a counselor, but I don't consider her to be a support person, because I already lied to her when she asked a really serious and specific question:  
""Do you have suicidal thoughts?""  
""No""

I really don't know what to do anymore, nothing is fun anymore, and this quarantine isn't doing anything for me. I just want someone to talk to I guess? I dunno",5.267157692307691,6.001221585000002,5.9860000000000015,79.5476153846154,68.15,8.953846153846156,31.884615384615394,9.057496981413335,2.7393576923076925,807,33,150,14,13,264,114,200,0.17800000000000002,0.76,0.062,-0.9581,0,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,2,0,10,11,0,0,7,0,24,1,1,1,2,31,40,11,1,3,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,12,8,0,1,10,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,3,2,32,5,21,30,2,14,0,3,0,0,14,7,0,6,7,115,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487253253592201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673171462407053,0.0,0.0,0.11090667211830103,0.11997651813740813,0.12599453531048388,0.0,0.0,0.10363209602126272,0.0,0.08215635249052691,0.0,0.0,0.1518429870520213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045120825810193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1160797628422145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794073555229577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211252565457368,0.0,0.1270519630144803,0.0,0.1362905276997096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041331504373552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484676225131977,0.0,0.0,0.1434683342228795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903354818839301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813540100426525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643122784238738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353975645600476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429728247334369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12931830097246472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10250091790551036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18686921783505397,0.2353571205032607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12895953220927842,0.0,0.0,0.15097657228973468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726780331655091,0.13856906107770978,0.13307205019405385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12269225150734107,0.14059760213596476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419270137158305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14741975624959666,0.305877541784039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083254093580428,0.11779751742382814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953717367181592,0.1727141564476141,0.0,0.10699468506006418,0.07858720347959779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316536098473652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589851808404087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746903438097028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thechristopherf,2020/04/08,"anxiety because of the state of the world right now Lately I can’t sleep. Just reading about how the world is and what’s going on in the US, before all this happened I had a plan (a solid one for the first time in my life). I was going to finish up college and maybe find a nice internship and get my career going but now I’m doing online classes thinking is this even worth doing? Is this even going to matter in a year? Im only 22 but I was starting to feel happy with where I was, I didn’t have anything but I have amazing group of friends, an wonderful relationship, and everything started to feel okay for once. In a way I’m starting to feel like the world as we know it won’t be same as it was before 2020 and not in a good way. I’m not even talking about the whole COVID-19 pandemic but how the US government is being ran and just the future of this country, I’m worried sick. I just want some normalcy back in my life.",2.2828608247422686,3.7932949536082456,3.919162371134021,88.56008376288662,76.26804123711341,6.499484536082474,24.496134020618552,7.1686216300943375,0.9590010309278352,727,24,154,8,16,243,108,194,0.057999999999999996,0.7759999999999999,0.166,0.9676,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,3,0,0,2,14,7,0,0,16,1,18,4,1,2,1,31,39,14,0,1,9,0,3,1,1,1,3,0,0,0,7,8,0,0,7,1,1,5,5,0,0,2,7,3,14,7,24,29,4,33,0,0,0,0,7,13,0,2,13,109,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473269499699127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266195104299995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527224291769532,0.0,0.08345661072839865,0.0,0.23299379968888034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2712753129111213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304226123087153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20767132129279148,0.0978056548212838,0.0,0.0,0.12512957951532214,0.11645215111800405,0.0,0.0,0.1057732155137448,0.0,0.07152772056644945,0.0,0.3112272789507153,0.11483023510927245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106550022437733,0.1457389545436702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478819445596432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07523994263336913,0.0,0.1544359013089566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193401475742998,0.06688534326274433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754045179116306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14580039364657096,0.09277103079593428,0.10412316206382327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694302219764445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469857799053654,0.0,0.11691695332481206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370048453536313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29070825807682754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11003983559069308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08772381979588433,0.0,0.0,0.07983097411471002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293620586576937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075069027992672,0.2173391786266028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152850630215098,0.0,0.0,0.14846868823954235,0.0,0.1390346616601889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816295829333794
mentalhealth,ExpensiveTransition4,2020/04/08,"Quick question Yo just a quick question, is it normal to teach yourself various ways to kill yourself with just about any common object (pencil, stapler, scissors, chairs, ect.) Or do I need to seek help",8.503333333333334,8.68812933333334,7.1633333333333375,75.765,61.22222222222222,8.311111111111114,37.444444444444436,7.1686216300943375,2.9232111111111103,160,7,25,1,2,48,30,36,0.11900000000000001,0.812,0.069,-0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,3,1,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,3,16,2,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22304938668216254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21984965183525565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36288037521988026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24320581484346135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32136767781227243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7348640016295318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26034896074655994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iwanttobeagoose,2020/04/08,"What do I even write for an essay for a philosophy class asking for what the meaning of my life is I mean, quite honestly the only thing keeping me alive right now is my parents. I can't exactly put that on an essay which is submitted to my professor. Right now my plan is just to bs some random stuff about wanting a career but honestly that just sounds so stereotypical",9.89926940639269,6.90541390410959,9.902739726027397,67.40515981735162,60.64383561643835,13.568949771689498,39.401826484018265,11.855464076750405,4.494903196347032,297,11,56,7,3,99,52,73,0.0,0.884,0.11599999999999999,0.8119,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,7,2,0,0,6,0,6,1,0,0,1,11,11,2,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,8,2,8,11,1,6,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,2,2,43,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314446002243683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351769936796967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22005165744029173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748660651894251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5393527777335515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18828819764929636,0.0,0.0,0.2748972698727737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488763042615509,0.0,0.2633212483136085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4228469819747123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834085047672601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644745568895236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460232443039357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SuddenReality3,2020/04/08,I can't stop thinking how much I hate my father. I keep dwelling on all the different shitty things he did/said/made me feel. It's the only thing I think about and I can barely focus on anything because I stay furious. What do I do?,0.14761904761904887,2.4157103265306152,2.2847959183673474,93.22746598639458,88.59183673469389,4.899319727891157,20.41156462585034,6.42735559955562,0.26577278911564584,182,6,39,2,6,61,40,49,0.23399999999999999,0.7020000000000001,0.064,-0.8754,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,1,2,0,4,0,0,1,1,8,9,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,9,0,3,9,2,4,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,26,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434350875954444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18032944712037224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090694877849933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14957574650521574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29206152580002004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629388758999345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174621243701708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22498484042804415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28139306272199954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153053208531612,0.0,0.2473192059459269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3930600260477986,0.3790996970763882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,XxJJ_p14yzxX,2020/04/08,"Constant crying Ive been crying all day. My nose is runny, i'm constantly shaking, i'm struggling to breathe, i feel weak and tired, and my eyes are sore as hell. My eyes are so sore and red, and Ive cried so much today that don't even recognize it, ive cried so much that I forget that i'm crying, Ive gotten too used to it.",1.0549999999999995,2.3130678333333385,3.184444444444445,93.605,79.0,5.911111111111111,20.333333333333336,6.42735559955562,0.024733333333333718,252,6,60,2,6,86,41,72,0.4270000000000001,0.573,0.0,-0.9868,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,2,0,0,9,8,4,1,1,8,15,8,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,2,5,9,0,3,13,3,5,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,4,34,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3328454487392478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8458262958846204,0.09931930919605617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171764637552208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786863387940669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22642011075810814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16099755891693518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770039978847352,0.14597700525921128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13300929919940102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wsdpii,2020/04/08,"(M/22) Hearing things that aren't there, seeing movement at the edges of vision Ever since I was a kid I'd hear my name being called even though no-one was there. I'd be playing in my room and I'd hear my Dad yell my name, go out and he'd say that he didn't say anything. Over time I just learned to ignore it, and if I heard my name more than once then someone was actually talking to me. However, the in the last few months I've been hearing murmurs, like I'm hearing people talk just out of earshot. Sometimes they'll only last a second, sometimes it goes on for minutes.Since I lived with roommates I always just passed it off as hearing them, but now I live alone and its still there. Still on the edge of hearing. 

I also see movement in my peripheral vision sometimes, flashes of color mostly. When I turn my head there's nothing there. It's a lot rarer than the murmurs though. 

I've been considering talking to my therapist about this, but she's occupied a lot with my atomic cocktail of other mental issues (anxiety, depression, PTSD, ADHD, and Borderline Personality Disorder) so I'm not sure if I want to talk about it yet. I figured I'd ask here and see if these kinds of things are just more symptoms of what I already struggle with or if it could be something else.",4.743764705882356,5.538590513725492,5.438039215686273,82.79117647058824,69.35294117647058,7.725490196078431,30.68627450980393,7.724431198458867,1.963156862745099,1011,40,198,11,17,328,145,255,0.069,0.9,0.03,-0.8826,1,1,1,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,2,0,23,7,0,1,9,0,14,2,1,0,2,36,31,20,0,6,12,1,0,1,0,1,1,11,1,2,15,11,1,1,2,2,0,4,3,3,0,1,7,15,25,4,30,18,6,26,0,1,4,0,27,11,0,8,12,134,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.08208581846671173,0.0,0.10109199262312654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711958944241542,0.09282493035694846,0.06726813823426031,0.06999187824993651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.064349087003755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922092179416428,0.0,0.07863781059011615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589261122678167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06716038387671591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244963744845935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09640508826416112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026875481200186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05555832306549572,0.07608842027819353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047805490090073684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632805786691229,0.0,0.6636398706917186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779603754585168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08759465564343558,0.0,0.13713276376662487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04109519737856452,0.0,0.14855327074073818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14302611337335622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476990412866346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714119097231107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071229464554512,0.0,0.0,0.08958159833674142,0.0,0.06397458229202951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05831596632752284,0.0734475055507845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832798469807036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337860388571624,0.0,0.0,0.20109048826367248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139164497227746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127185317286565,0.06475718723615033,0.24958086337083316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343514977056556,0.0,0.0,0.08793709557573663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792790456956417,0.08742951572204895,0.0,0.2704394441299472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976660353470606,0.11176686808880544,0.0,0.16528856855002022,0.0,0.04904915603527213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914948742314688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04961424123179064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hereforagoodtime123,2020/04/08,"Relationship Anxiety So I’ve battled anxiety and depression for years with varying degrees of success. I have been on medication since October and it seems to have really helped my depression and my pmdd, but I’ve been in a relationship for two months and my anxiety is through the roof! I am not able to manage it. I’m constantly worried that things are going wrong. It tears me up and stays in my mind. It makes me unable function. I feel like all the progress I made to get to a good place is being ruined. I don’t have healthcare yet so I’m not sure I can afford to talk to a therapist about this. Can anyone give me any pointers on managing relationship anxiety specifically?",4.1195836224843845,6.1767434427480925,5.5385149201943085,76.56559333795975,72.58778625954199,9.649132546842473,30.99306037473977,10.018931242160765,3.4585664122137403,545,25,100,16,11,183,84,131,0.212,0.6970000000000001,0.091,-0.9273,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,4,9,1,0,5,0,13,1,0,2,2,16,22,8,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,3,1,13,4,17,18,1,12,0,3,0,0,6,6,0,1,5,68,20,3,0.14977060192669794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184914516293338,0.0,0.4582964021350375,0.0,0.0,0.10472308720709372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16184881370165366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25799439995690426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572851643721021,0.10699614794201427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824895795306762,0.1436736086132084,0.08511808453981827,0.12562047507803514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003880774426715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317035089606758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14171656484469802,0.09997303977385456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508781247746839,0.0,0.0,0.15122561314664526,0.0,0.11954546556300034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15647840196572144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959468826896856,0.0,0.0,0.4823927291585734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363455310036459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389178960046025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596355340411812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411570198536447,0.0,0.0,0.12037993661911033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17389521240503136,0.09950093293478246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14630411556276485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15209931629458526,0.0,0.0,0.16375064182386564,0.0,0.09644735721872448
mentalhealth,ohse602,2020/04/08,"I don’t know if I’m just slacking off or I’m mentally exhausted. I dont feel like doing anything, nor do I feel an urge to be productive. It’s not that I have nothing to do - there are tons of work piled up each day for me (I’m an uni student btw). I know it’s not just common laziness as I began to notice I’ve had difficulty concentrating. I’ve comforted myself that I’m going to be productive tomorrow, but it’s exactly the same when I wake up the next day and it’s just getting worse and worse after months. I always think of abandoning everything and escape from the rest of humanity as I force myself get to do the fucking job. To visualize it, I feel like I’m drowning inside whilst trying to function like every one does.",4.149006622516559,4.746752807947022,6.1625761589404,77.77472516556291,70.58940397350995,9.483708609271524,29.669536423841052,9.642632912329526,2.6932299337748344,578,22,116,13,10,203,89,151,0.153,0.82,0.027000000000000003,-0.9523,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,5,7,1,0,6,0,11,3,1,0,1,21,27,10,1,1,8,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,4,0,1,6,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,2,3,13,4,18,23,4,14,0,1,0,1,1,3,1,2,13,74,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554309222896177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537188597480481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.240938547608444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16346821197201308,0.0,0.2189258960894805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15738539402484014,0.0,0.16788202158874485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833520848517377,0.266897095192336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17269176565784344,0.19518851828964096,0.0,0.10616162333397693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853682180881607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20531862056419928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737802409337381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18824847554555493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14910040275221692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19866182056940146,0.0,0.0,0.1792377445861703,0.2126707914832334,0.0,0.0,0.1265791772606456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119692632933543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682359838258492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359911881889937,0.0,0.380726295611742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wyattlee1274,2020/04/08,"I dislike talking to people, but I want to be able to connect with someone. [M 19] I have always been a quiet person, ever since I was young. When people talk to my through text or in person I normally don't feel the need to verbally respond. A few days ago my father told me about how I tested borderline on the autism spectrum, and I am not to certain on what that means in terms of my mental understanding of certain things. I have always been horrible with social queues, and have never been the conversationalist. I have never struggled with social anxiety out of the normal (like talking to a crush). But I never really felt like it was worth it to put myself in those situations. I noticed that I tend to 'scope out' someones personality to determine if I can click with them. Also, over the past year or two I have had strong interests in having a person I connect with in my life, but in reality I don't know how to start to get to know someone, or rarely have the ambition to get to know someone. I have a few friends, two that I talk to semi-normally. However, I feel like those relationships are not that strong even though I care about my friends, I just don't feel like they are a necessary part of my life. And to be honest I have felt that way about family members as well.

I guess the question that I'm having trouble figuring out is if this is a normal mentality or way of viewing life.
If there are any questions I will happily answer them to the best of my ability.
And thank for reading",6.147706677265504,6.0590592635135145,7.106669316375201,75.12354531001594,66.16216216216216,10.07281399046105,32.61446740858506,9.773937934552695,3.0148957074721783,1186,45,226,23,17,399,147,296,0.081,0.747,0.172,0.9859,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,3,3,13,18,0,1,15,0,29,3,0,2,6,53,50,20,0,8,13,1,5,4,2,1,3,1,0,4,13,12,0,0,14,1,1,1,8,2,1,2,9,8,36,16,47,38,5,27,0,0,2,0,21,12,0,10,16,175,49,2,0.09043925473024066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016894252597995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07232423933297069,0.15050540974640422,0.0,0.0,0.0615017945107545,0.0,0.06918578232550822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09491041818077643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922088476578438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058325837448135964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059734274796398375,0.08180748364855114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525808047212198,0.0,0.13718641376149546,0.12921964329980296,0.1736717346201787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13974628772062528,0.0,0.09450155570793464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962903529709476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491091476266951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916397606674521,0.17673620639194146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851486157726504,0.0,0.0,0.18228299445670995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705956143083779,0.20925698595348927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658338026910522,0.0,0.10296569093772333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793689963181484,0.08633450205499295,0.12539838373160528,0.31587227530308903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090916430493662,0.2026253265873004,0.0,0.090463728876982,0.0,0.057937702409662124,0.0,0.0,0.09709791363403578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481228608632619,0.10165751157302257,0.0,0.1843828618271458,0.30651554818583354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401336998635382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454674551148336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2907665886963421,0.0,0.08326431485852717,0.0,0.0,0.060083822217591475,0.0,0.08885610858728447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641858358386115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17669202106751766,0.09415045368580463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053343415640187984,0.14357294160812778,0.0,0.0,0.08131575132034248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05823991487883477
mentalhealth,manic_border,2020/04/08,"Strong urge to hurt my girlfriends dog Just first off, I care very strongly about animal rights and have never hurt a dog in my life. Even hitting a mosquito I feel like a murderer. But there’s something about my girlfriends dog, I want to see him in pain. I can’t stop thinking about choking him, hitting him, whatever. I’ve hit him a few times now in moments of weakness and it feels good. I’ve caught myself playing with him and with my hands round his neck. If he looks scared or anxious around me it only makes me want to hurt him more. Obviously I should talk to a professional about this but I’m so anxious I feel like a monster. I know this isn’t me, it feels like a different person whenever these thoughts come into my head. Just putting this out there, I hope in some way it might help.",3.8276415094339633,5.226736371069183,4.123411949685536,89.09945754716982,72.0817610062893,7.3125786163522015,27.715408805031448,7.793537801064563,1.4754314465408809,629,23,132,8,12,196,98,159,0.139,0.696,0.165,0.6424,1,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,12,16,1,1,7,0,5,6,3,1,2,32,25,8,1,5,6,0,6,3,2,2,3,0,0,1,8,9,0,1,7,1,0,3,3,7,0,1,2,8,24,9,19,18,3,19,0,3,3,0,13,9,0,5,9,82,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3201333183134977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12613200424740556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14445995202165246,0.0,0.0,0.12205132223061355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480333861904387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09358332405536644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28656603284673865,0.3036649510133529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051940087808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884083724683525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14541235531723645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09497021218456783,0.0,0.0,0.14072775749518218,0.0,0.0,0.4550385213979575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786779996091306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007814266077142,0.20766421453345926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11898189975638525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457757377096096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15030815376628845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927821251747738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775980511297828,0.15076559699327471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237161478922701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424351732040876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100043693412114,0.0,0.0,0.14185400602466988,0.0,0.11290667349964476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907803734267774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845717863801275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11388312650982366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09078769351219043,0.0,0.1124841283941046,0.08261917946083255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169071094041444,0.167142035927983,0.11246502251757258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crazyfamilybigirl,2020/04/08,"I might have Depersonalization Derealization Disorder? Hi there, so I’m new to this sub but I feel I just needed to say this because I don’t know where else I can share. I’m an 18 year old female who has been diagnosed with social anxiety, severe depression, PSTD and generalized anxiety disorder, but I feel like there are more things undiagnosed. For the better part of my life I’ve felt like things around me aren’t real as though I’m living in a simulation and most of the time it’s as though I’m being controlled or I’m not my own person. I don’t know what’s going on and it scares me. I disassociate a lot and have also looked into DID and OSDD because I don’t remember anything before I was 7. It’s been getting worse as time goes on and I feel so lost. I feel most of the time like I’m out of body or in a dream and I get distracted all the time and I can’t seem to motivate myself to do anything. I don’t know what’s wrong with me and I’m scared to talk to anyone about it. I feel so helpless and sometimes I just need to vent about it. Does anyone have any suggestions? I know I need help I just don’t know where to start.",1.3006242107162187,3.2114748589211644,3.5770196644416394,88.08006314270253,80.49377593360995,6.8469060075771235,20.43676709363161,7.893859768569023,0.7395378314991881,895,24,200,16,23,308,121,241,0.184,0.713,0.10300000000000001,-0.9686,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,4,16,12,0,3,8,0,20,3,1,2,1,48,48,23,0,3,8,0,6,3,0,1,2,1,0,1,12,15,0,1,14,1,0,1,8,7,0,0,6,8,26,5,27,40,7,18,0,3,1,0,9,9,0,7,11,128,38,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809369523207801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491154268367688,0.0,0.16854186864009613,0.0,0.0,0.15405073856497495,0.0,0.1813020829261744,0.09806440056798296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343031717357935,0.0,0.09373675140854597,0.0,0.0,0.09742622205037976,0.0,0.12236123584935978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12355210028744265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09487933587269297,0.11180853657390777,0.0,0.0,0.2525023194424961,0.0,0.09640042663379078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202327332426988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27849718239570403,0.07869723884991672,0.10576941424589427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11510651649117165,0.0,0.06260560177463317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383690590871872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027010936786733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077808190938879,0.16145360441351728,0.0,0.09727195446370944,0.0,0.09250537758175484,0.0,0.12025099183100617,0.0936527988768086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168607371897404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24504334735776284,0.0,0.10639174470423936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11559279223960145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11929089704517094,0.0,0.0,0.09618613416971007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538446497257608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12478808170948205,0.0,0.0,0.08760244331682154,0.2205757079970039,0.0,0.0,0.10028414130691596,0.0,0.12444772502256568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122926959593628,0.0,0.0,0.10894955170297417,0.0,0.07797073786554648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854121206294349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14636879617763007,0.0,0.21646029108883405,0.0,0.2569371780806156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226090040661343,0.0,0.12044100296417938,0.0,0.07093844828505991
mentalhealth,jjlegendary23,2020/04/08,"any advice on how to be less ""insecure"" and stop anxiety from taking me to dark places? hi so i know this prob belongs in relationship advice but i think you guys can help me out too.

so my girlfriend is sort of an ""influencer"" on social media and she tends to get a lot of attention from other guys due to her being really pretty. sometimes when she posts stuff it tends to come off as shes looking for attention. i know that not everything a girl posts is for attention but when she changes her outfits in order to take these pictures/videos for social media while when shes with me she constantly wears baggy clothes and even when we go out, she doesnt wear anything remotely similar to what she does when shes taking these pictures/videos for social media. and yes we have talked about it, and her explanation is always that shes doing it for herself and i can understand that bc again shes a pretty girl.

maybe im looking too far into this with how insecure i am that shes really out of my league but sometimes it hurts. bc it even gets to the point of her not responding to my texts but shed post on social media and that kinda triggers me.

any advice on how to cope with a significant other being liked and hit on by everyone that knows her or just sees her. slowly losing my mind. and yes again we have talked about this too and she always reassures me that shes not gonna leave me for anyone else but when i see the small little actions that she does it triggers tf out of me.",5.513918717375095,5.714407379194633,6.111633109619683,80.73245339299034,67.48993288590604,9.306785980611483,27.96495152870992,9.150863307647796,2.103827143922446,1181,34,234,20,18,385,143,298,0.046,0.855,0.099,0.9547,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,3,1,0,1,21,6,0,2,7,2,20,2,2,6,0,51,40,29,0,0,10,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,4,23,22,0,1,8,0,0,3,4,4,0,0,0,4,43,2,43,35,2,37,0,2,4,0,42,18,0,4,13,170,66,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965803517494998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835962204513996,0.0,0.0,0.13759530499767794,0.0,0.07739317930728518,0.0,0.0,0.07073895957352913,0.10365848605080093,0.08325257531499562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107022241399351,0.08714720215056553,0.0,0.10932657730786792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17706545118944647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451281275439965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364090958335048,0.0,0.0,0.09667027978841676,0.09092320011519064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057121217667442,0.0,0.0574960584319995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20034428610651628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06781072198376159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830234714877916,0.0,0.1092787104537247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16679772361805842,0.0,0.0,0.10712221620901298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049425533872794906,0.10139683022085706,0.0,0.0,0.1699111403436683,0.11318102094947373,0.0,0.08600934491333441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163677013929884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215075605733352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10569894037686288,0.0,0.0956363815685558,0.0,0.29067269618706754,0.2058482834548344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962151588159185,0.0,0.0,0.10861648141646596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16123546258728602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4125118024810558,0.0,0.0,0.2001153127927444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458090829566799,0.0,0.0,0.11581306032053013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22819704839216906,0.16262987841684673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482431599012979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531936908200884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GwenCocoUgo,2020/04/08,"I can't eat. For the past 10 days or so, I've only eaten lunch and half of what I used to eat and that's only because I'm at home and we eat as a family so I can't not eat (past eating disorder history) I think I might be eating somewhere around 500 calories. I'm too scared to download an app and calculate it, because that's how it starts. I'm not NOT eating deliberately, I just don't want to. I don't want the food to finish up because I don't want my family to go out to buy more. I don't want to eat because I don't want to move. I'm constantly in bed. At this point, if I get the virus, I'm done for and it doesn't matter that I'm in my 20s, I've been very unhealthy.",-0.1283791208791243,1.1811219679487197,2.976227106227107,93.57115384615385,82.52564102564101,6.252014652014653,19.47619047619048,7.1686216300943375,0.14930366300366282,521,13,133,7,14,188,79,156,0.12300000000000001,0.877,0.0,-0.8879,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,0,0,6,1,0,1,5,0,12,11,0,2,0,24,29,11,0,6,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,8,8,11,0,1,0,1,2,11,1,0,1,3,0,14,0,19,24,1,16,0,0,0,0,1,8,0,3,6,75,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668704364499998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374428404699548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052309975019636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280073840573769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160359651003576,0.0,0.0,0.0996514779857594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7971358361041305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18359857802182936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774983466906415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050875973141633134,0.0,0.05534214762977918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09767804927686936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330264363499657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10349737731549366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481206769803245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859165925827101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205366231851532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749234133597448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06892463235624206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062395874836675434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410330551195343,0.0,0.0803470281456049,0.2871802650297861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnicornPunk-MiFRun,2020/04/08,"today i was told i dont have depression/anxiety, im just lazy and unmotivated... worst of all, it was my mom who said it. I'm used to hearing this very thing, but not from here. I've been diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder and depression by 4 different doctors and a sleep disorder by two. she's been there for almost all of them, but today when she and my dad were berating me for sleeping too much and i reminded them that i have GAD/depression and its exhausting to have these, she just shrugged it off. then my dad proceeded to go on and on about how i need to taper off my meds because they were a crutch and i was weak for needing them. 

​

it hurt. MY brother has bipolar disorder and my parents never tease him about his symptoms or meds. they never tell him to get off his meds. just because im semi-functional i should be invalidated? 

​

Worse, when i told them they were hurting my feelings they got all mock offended and pretended i was being too sensitive. im sorry i sleep a lot. im sorry i need a nap to get through the day. you don't tease someone for needing an inhaler or glasses without being a dick. teasing someone for needing to do things differently to function is just rude. 

​

It's so hurtful when they berate me for needing a nap. I have a diagnosed sleep disorder! exhaustion is a prime symptom of GAD/Depression! i do my work. i clean the barns for my mom every morning and muck stalls and do my college work and work on my writing but just because i need a 2 hour nap to function and sleep longer on my days off, im lazy. they barge into my room and wake me up and give me a hard time when i have difficulty waking up early and always laugh at me when i say it's nap time and excuse myself. 

​

Like i figured out a schedule that lets me function. i figured out how to work without being so tired i cry or needing to sleep every hour of the weekend to recover. then my mom gets on to me about how i'll never function in normal society and how am i going to get ""a real job"" if i have to nap all the time and i get it, she's saying this because she's worried about me, but i'll figure it out! hopefully i can get flexible work hours or work from home. or i can push my sleep schedule to where i nap as soon as i get off work instead of around 2 pm. i'm not incapable, but she makes me feel that way. i feel weak and like a failure. i try to hard to work with my mental illness, not against it, but they just want me to be ""normal"". 

I can't be my version of happy, I have to be their version. 

​

They're good parents on almost everything else and they just are acting out of my best interest, but i've tried to explain a million times by now what its like for me and how hurtful they are being and they just don't seem to be able to understand. how can they take my brother's mental illness seriously and my sister's depression seriously but not mine? i'm just very sad today and frustrated. the quarantine is making me feel especially trapped and lonely. 

​

Thank you for listening to my rant. i guess i'm just needing to vent to someone who might understand and not tell me ""it's all in my head."" Like yeah its all in my head but so are seizures and brain tumors so please, neurotypicals, just F\*CK OFF!",2.44879448621554,4.421297412030079,4.028139097744361,85.92346177944863,77.13533834586467,7.079949874686718,27.32393483709273,8.021203637495839,1.7930957393483706,2589,108,523,44,60,862,256,665,0.193,0.71,0.09699999999999999,-0.9973,5,4,0,0,0,0,91.0,0,2,16,9,40,33,7,0,20,1,46,26,13,9,9,121,91,63,0,15,33,10,6,4,0,2,13,5,3,0,24,37,0,0,11,8,0,4,14,22,0,2,13,12,98,11,83,66,12,60,0,8,0,1,56,26,1,13,33,371,122,11,0.04260766463565775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533084293641235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03545299020571651,0.27699232098864546,0.3106378570417143,0.0,0.0,0.06518949364794321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03792985487521195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389294756740683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0447141153511117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04756424493411605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046802518900472316,0.0549568376916998,0.0,0.1467916764682777,0.08649176544179593,0.0,0.08903188193023642,0.1953283001096568,0.04361075019593395,0.0,0.0,0.04993586562766288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03559323650698081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179759021809785,0.0,0.038293021616453655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08617486182746989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15582522343937852,0.0408731543709921,0.048429835412922284,0.03573728758943321,0.03407724169337429,0.0,0.046937146226762434,0.0,0.0,0.04535665129096222,0.07633619703063416,0.0,0.08745551245545967,0.0,0.04802193467512948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04273896164619236,0.0423190248228857,0.12587990101700916,0.0,0.18244954490060836,0.0,0.23011794659235335,0.0,0.04228153268038391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043569223847559166,0.0,0.08326381097884346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03622351280873004,0.0,0.0,0.056881893996479325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.141982530599379,0.0,0.08587700904613912,0.04519999894502296,0.0,0.1497047455900347,0.0,0.0,0.031321536007935066,0.2843373910282376,0.09858497293867613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349292975833307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462153860148384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046770420928397734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04849685036027879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04052964612553564,0.06776665012942254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038788417652332666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2984690476704622,0.0,0.10830400793608493,0.0,0.0,0.0953915844374731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857135547972382,0.03203566121672512,0.0,0.07448195380080692,0.03922741307623444,0.0,0.0,0.05661327826531962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937948756325828,0.048971242658016965,0.12116125227343165,0.08142689894145072,0.0,0.0578556148941007,0.0,0.041621497213223065,0.08871216305143728,0.0,0.0367993420753599,0.0,0.07031157112007808,0.025131104528636157,0.0338199809642422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214453650143166,0.0,0.2481510984767639,0.04327015166276965,0.043420850338361,0.0,0.0,0.3106378570417143,0.0
mentalhealth,krisbeanuh,2020/04/08,"what’s wrong with me? am i depressed or do most teenagers feel like this? I just want to start off by saying that because of the home I am being raised in and because of cultural beliefs, I have not been able to speak to a profesional about this meaning that I have not been diagnosed but I still feel like what my mind goes through isn’t right. At the same time I don’t want to seem like an edgy teenager self diagnosing themself so I truly do not mean to offend anyone.
I’ve tried so hard to find an escape. A year ago I was abusing substances that would numb me and take me away from my problems. I got  caught and my parents, specifically my mom, say it’s my fault and she won’t ever let me live it down. It wasn’t anything extremely bad, but they had found out I was juuling and that was bad enough for them. Had they known what the other thing was, their reaction would have been undeniably worse. I don’t think I would have ever turned to those habits had I not been wanting to escape the life I live for the past five years. Everyday for that last five years I’ve wanted to leave this place. Go somewhere where I can actually live. My only escape now is sleep. My dreams obviously are the illusions I’ll never have but they’re not real. Waking up is fine but only for that split second where I don’t know where I am or who I am. For that split second I’m actually glad to be awake but then I remember. I remember who I am and where I am. I remember that I have to repeat the same cycle every single day. Maybe it’s not right to call it a cycle because she might be in a good mood for once but I always manage to ruin it. I don’t mean to but she just makes it so hard to keep everything right. She is the cause of almost all my problems. I hate talking about what started it all because it’s so stupid and any other normal parent wouldn’t have overreacted the way she did. It’s only because of the cultural and traditional upbringing she and my dad were brought up with and the same one she’s trying bringing us up with that make any situation worse. The situation was basically in the fifth grade when I had a close friend who happened to be a boy and of the same background as us. He and I were very close because we were best friends. We were children. And one day he happened to be in the same room as my parents and told them that I had written him love letters. I never did that but my parents, more specifically my mom, didn’t believe me. That friendship was ruined but that’s something for another day. Anyways, my mom reacted like I committed a crime and basically said that she was ashamed to have had me and regretted even having me as a daughter. All because of something she assumed to be true no matter how many times I tried telling her that it never happened. The words that came out of her mouth five years ago were the same words that made me want to end my life. At twelve years old. Not once but twice. I wanted to end my life so I could stop hurting inside. But I didn’t because that would be too easy. She would just manage to blame it all on me. And it seems like my dad is the only light I have in my life. I have tried talking to him about what I feel and he tries his best to help but his best is sitting me down in a room with my mom and telling us that we need to sort things out and they always end up worse. I would feel horrible hurting him but sometimes that feeling isn’t enough. She would continue for the next few years saying she wished I was never born or that I would be better off dead for mistakes that anyone does. I tried to reason with myself saying that she probably didn’t mean it in the moment but even if she didn’t say it with meaning it, how is that better? How am I supposed when she does and doesn’t mean something? How am I supposed to deal with it? What makes hurting inside worse is no one knowing what you’re feeling. My mind was always in a dark place and only recently had I started feeling like I was finally over it. For five years I carried a constant weight in my mind and when I finally decided to let everything out to them and tell them that it was really her that was the cause of my problems I was ignored. My problems and thoughts were brushed off as “normal teenager behavior” and “it’s all a part of being a woman”. What is normal about wanting to take your life twice because of the words and attitudes your mother radiates? What’s normal about turning to drugs as a way to escape your thoughts that have been following and torturing you? I just wish my mind was normal and didn’t feel suffocated.",3.346901340996169,4.7894305387931055,4.224813218390807,87.72928639846747,73.35344827586206,7.1383141762452125,25.819923371647512,7.695328111545312,1.2594618773946364,3612,120,754,46,72,1163,318,928,0.142,0.74,0.11800000000000001,-0.9873,4,0,4,0,0,2,60.0,6,4,8,5,33,42,4,1,38,0,102,14,3,12,14,184,162,65,1,32,29,12,11,6,2,11,9,7,3,4,67,46,1,3,31,1,0,6,28,23,0,11,51,20,127,18,99,88,21,95,1,7,0,1,85,40,0,11,52,554,194,3,0.04059436562451296,0.048097685225257626,0.07922849008376748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196891160453142,0.0,0.0406493933289843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133329243926884,0.0,0.0,0.05521112132956182,0.04256673184524398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05676904862134643,0.0,0.033405704044860214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03813974278903149,0.0,0.06778919933736681,0.22271353651281287,0.0,0.0,0.045735948882649334,0.1278038467487803,0.07180483505750078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04145138602479584,0.04642913981204595,0.0,0.08340319145805428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04386808782750457,0.0,0.03241129775757938,0.0,0.0,0.07854002261919922,0.04185100846625989,0.03496386762888637,0.08240485320839451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710488058372276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04707657626631905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786367669174113,0.08388966249612065,0.0,0.053624391280820825,0.07343985555732838,0.03420250385928511,0.0,0.07296719656701274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642058478717274,0.08700186873986951,0.0,0.08893828660947639,0.03710251475186373,0.0,0.0,0.044509626617192745,0.06272621236564177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023070713481933642,0.034048627899209566,0.032467022555796976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10769239037041664,0.0,0.0727291561071166,0.0400785317767329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027209547585608587,0.0,0.04071945858364658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037132398104306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036082137365500366,0.0,0.0,0.04461920342571162,0.033089826041783565,0.0,0.042983571832681186,0.0,0.08302097840696464,0.14336500479305395,0.11899413926116005,0.0,0.10753670570909957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036637999885973764,0.03841137028461235,0.08129116282433245,0.04115631520562836,0.04078249652341198,0.2653149888670123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043064206853202884,0.16395494851174144,0.1901745215772177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03010020774123724,0.12523550933153385,0.0,0.043172568374706656,0.0,0.1988692965604984,0.0,0.0,0.042596958015617664,0.08646334906666946,0.08252337821282961,0.15436922154807714,0.0,0.0,0.1803009560269604,0.043959742079295885,0.03875191533681188,0.0,0.0,0.08482494401464613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04376759204593801,0.15537330205531974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04620527531834904,0.026005790097202316,0.04173776884404674,0.04008203871344729,0.0,0.13795650856179886,0.10400209931846584,0.038614537725102434,0.16141134441571814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391117169361834,0.04234877664854232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125953559839677,0.040623682389881864,0.0,0.0,0.09375457775704513,0.0401488655978846,0.0,0.08619870278125047,0.0,0.032418712825615835,0.033938707357460164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06104382183699534,0.06525642680348677,0.10644379447475076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053938185459274465,0.026011230363545537,0.0,0.06445478374244243,0.04734180209378856,0.0,0.0,0.03878965598754285,0.0,0.1653654574494061,0.08831002566787058,0.0,0.0,0.14649007078164428,0.0,0.0,0.03349460302611506,0.16760526026358974,0.06444383584110147,0.0,0.049433001144884636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336303415031363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16547650658023194,0.2306965810432393,0.044383566200128316,0.0,0.182990083665404
mentalhealth,ryannbreezy,2020/04/08,"Now that we are in quarantine, I am forced to deal with the depression and anxiety I’ve been suppressing... Within the last couple of weeks being completely quarantined inside of my home with my immediate family, I have realized that I never truly found a way to work through my depression and anxiety but rather suppress it through my daily routines and life goals. 

I’m very career driven and I tend to associate my lack of “happiness” due to not being where I want to in my life. becoming a workaholic and staying busy has given me tools to distract myself and learn how to “get over” things quickly rather than work through them. I’ve realized these moments in quarantine have not only become my quietest hours but my darkest... I don’t know how get myself out of a headspace of hopelessness and uncertainty. I feel suffocated, my anxiety has become so stressful it has been making me nauseous. 

If anyone is experiencing a heightened sense of depression and anxiety and would like to share their experience and or some advise,  I’m all ears.

Thank you for listening.",8.33029203956665,8.713246673575131,8.371898257183233,66.29061234102686,61.53886010362696,12.199528968440886,38.27084314649082,11.741389052700956,4.931967875647668,860,40,137,25,11,280,119,193,0.196,0.738,0.066,-0.9743,0,3,0,0,0,1,17.0,1,1,2,4,8,10,0,2,6,0,14,3,1,3,2,39,28,17,0,6,8,0,1,1,0,1,2,2,1,0,6,14,0,2,6,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,5,4,24,4,27,20,3,18,0,4,0,0,8,7,0,3,9,105,30,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4248294096164132,0.0,0.0,0.09707570712782712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4599925338329961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556442711584416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15361677883219074,0.0,0.0,0.14313138372191028,0.3587316246890509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358059372045969,0.13087999721384289,0.0,0.0701984584196396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15222391717992692,0.0,0.0,0.14506969051223903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14779098833148366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926145784952945,0.0,0.1367231666716993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07629933615626251,0.11316794414395252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961246074141442,0.06782710234640459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267253084865056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10707705978095973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558923712466033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14797818478298513,0.0,0.0,0.1590334622685515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278193601867441,0.0,0.0,0.09223489950617328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11455229047130225,0.08188767623788497,0.11019967898408932,0.11136396939401368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20214508267022369,0.0,0.0,0.09862343248924688,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,trans_demon_boi,2020/04/08,"Am I alone? Last year I was in a really deep state of depression and I was extremely suicidal. Every night I would want to kms, but this one person helped me every night. At one point I tried and failed, ended up in the hospital. When the doctor asked me why I responded with ""Household, constant screaming and mean jokes when talking to me, also because I'm trans"". They took the last part of that and worked on it. Even now I don't feel like I belong in my house. The screaming calmed down a little but I still get very bad panic attacks and/or it trigger my fight, flight, freeze response. Everytime I talk about my depression or anxiety my parents have brought up excuses: ""you just cant control your emotion"", ""your just unstable"". It was never their fault. I was bullied and one of the things they deny saying is that I deserved it. They told me this as a kid, no wonder I have BPD like symptoms since I was a child. Also a few year back I was fine with hugs and people touching me out of nowhere. I dont recall what happened but I know something did and now everytime someone touches me I jump and I can feel the exact spot where someone touched me. Idk wtf I've done wrong at this point is it really me?",2.231509762900977,4.5506772887029285,3.253582635983264,89.47289836122734,79.46025104602509,6.159065550906558,24.60268479776848,7.333567415737692,1.1696986052998612,948,35,188,13,24,303,145,239,0.261,0.6729999999999999,0.065,-0.9954,1,1,1,0,1,0,31.0,0,3,4,3,13,17,2,1,11,0,18,3,0,2,2,28,31,17,1,2,6,1,6,2,0,1,2,3,0,3,12,11,0,1,5,1,0,3,5,11,0,3,11,9,38,6,20,19,2,34,0,3,0,1,20,15,0,2,17,130,50,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212023085419015,0.0,0.1871692393751954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952358415983991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940230828914492,0.13313250382449365,0.0,0.08998477981310561,0.09771074616592287,0.07133717808420215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14738852777493774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264621395855598,0.13125316501417356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20158642546361413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977975121341132,0.0,0.11975691020801445,0.1371520905885601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163704959642206,0.10364915981475857,0.0,0.0,0.07729371840882908,0.0,0.1971967337275484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11834242089587822,0.08360247743985763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06114058186009636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348456609945457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843919749503485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13503080529350645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643137211041256,0.1907815182741676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143447260058397,0.11728950464454455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747421803967413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025667202790197,0.0,0.0,0.21963952896736091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23789691986710101,0.0,0.0,0.137303284828016,0.12994209343104388,0.12672635882459346,0.0,0.08113020032560428,0.10218146442578543,0.0,0.0,0.2212523566217995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993805384164374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930627477926912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680405083993598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983093169721729,0.09009134039697754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345608595154538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280060407491893,0.0,0.0,0.12163348344538535,0.0,0.18812006093648906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774601853361203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182212703825377,0.13001876062539722,0.07945209755828081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655764299340401,0.06902420698185854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559660030339413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269083079271047,0.08519538389428112,0.0,0.0,0.08313099760730193,0.1279481514256111,0.0,0.15072015509160405
mentalhealth,ABryant00,2020/04/08,"I (F20) think I may have mild anger issues, not sure where to turn I've noticed that theres been multiple instances where I get unreasonably angry at my BF. He'll say something that is at most mildly annoying yet I feel this intense hot anger inside of me where I want to retort by saying really really hurtful things. I've been trying to deal with it by ""cooling off"" for a minute before speaking but often times it doesn't help and I'll end up saying something regrettable. We've been together for over two years and I love him to death. I'm terrified of messing up the relationship by saying something I don't mean. 

I have thought a lot about why I feel like this and I think it stems from how my parents and I communicate. Dinners together often end in a fight because in my family the smallest conflict is blown out of proportion. I notice that my parents get into fights this way as well. Often times casual conversations with my mom will escalate so quickly that looking back on it I'm unsure of who even started the fight or why we were fighting. 

I don't think I can afford therapy and even if I could I'm not sure that my issues are bad enough to be worth it. Its not something that necessarily effects my life every single day but I really hate this angry, hurtful side of me. And I'm starting to resent my parents because I feel like they raised me to be like this through the way they communicate with each other.",4.7031850533807855,5.947539558718866,5.720816725978647,79.07175889679715,69.78291814946618,8.466975088967972,29.352491103202855,8.841846274778883,2.3690710320284705,1140,43,212,20,20,377,155,281,0.23600000000000002,0.685,0.079,-0.9944,4,0,4,0,5,0,18.0,1,0,2,1,16,22,9,0,7,1,18,3,0,2,2,41,40,13,1,3,7,4,4,3,1,3,1,5,0,0,20,13,1,1,9,1,1,0,6,13,1,1,5,11,32,9,35,29,5,28,0,2,1,1,25,15,0,8,14,146,52,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07686351065093079,0.08346290332913585,0.12187007533653656,0.0,0.0850590854133725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07981038389463779,0.0,0.0,0.0644663002308198,0.10305496179303236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17707079610415213,0.10328599333917908,0.0,0.13204603179574165,0.0,0.08422109424881118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942339322209743,0.0,0.15162920798183374,0.14282370704221695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044505476319047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09869037120818404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700146518813818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140197222504209,0.0,0.0,0.2086657358547872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060510908986672,0.1465070606965176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394170583775315,0.0,0.0,0.08498290477493121,0.09021832010251618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888636874326764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707261529282233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22761155041682854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3329831612585655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19211190863121705,0.0,0.0,0.10732024649768676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3179706399693432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3078181317570409,0.0,0.0,0.14150521651734022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842331465479686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431362719091699,0.0,0.06640936318383274,0.19215209737175332,0.0,0.07935752947638801,0.1165756282772004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06786666766972825,0.10872839932257697,0.0976469552508154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058959336007059236,0.1586881005688385,0.0,0.0,0.08987656015695003,0.0,0.18039773901719108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437133185331302
mentalhealth,popolega,2020/04/08,"Mental Health Stream I just wanted to let everyone know I have a community on Twitch, and a discord where we openly  talk about mental health and make sure everyone know's it's a safe spot and a place to enjoy themselves even if they aren't wanting to discuss anything about their personal problems. We are in no way, shape, or form a licensed therapist group, or psychiatrist. This is just  a spot where you can feel safe, let us know you are having a bad day, and have others around you who are probably going through the same thing. I may have suggestions and opinions but I am not a professional. I'm just a guy with a community who likes to stay pretty positive and open the stigma around discussing mental health. 

twitch.tv/thebaesed

[https://www.twitch.tv/videos/586212064](https://www.twitch.tv/videos/586212064)",7.778379446640315,10.473107536231886,5.29258234519104,79.46223320158106,64.21739130434783,8.496442687747034,29.21212121212121,9.095868883498916,2.5788318840579714,672,23,105,12,11,187,89,138,0.055,0.795,0.15,0.9325,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,3,3,2,0,10,7,0,0,12,0,14,4,0,1,1,35,23,10,0,4,8,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,2,6,13,0,2,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,1,12,5,12,20,2,14,0,0,0,0,17,10,0,5,2,76,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159179552581205,0.2507952388408605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761442544692785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09084475329640472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303844907574296,0.0,0.0,0.2692005892888041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07122438618998835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005548781670323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13947616578373992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4491912165083193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23224327884583545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880831982328658,0.0,0.06881837351454742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402690992030738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4258692473024823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299582902945633,0.14717148382590645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433079518633246,0.15187375694053995,0.13478652816124442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15014083810319234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276137667136131,0.0,0.0,0.11322005895090916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635523888176975,0.09358288273727276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16944041899573142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16616887629361687,0.1118102116581468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aeval_x,2020/04/08,"Does anyone else ""act"" with their subconscious? I've done this as long as I can remember. But I don't think to myself often. There's always 1-5 ""people"" in the room. Not physically, but I know where they'd be and what they'd be doing. These people are typically the closest 5 people to me. When I was younger it was usually people I admired. 

Now instead having ""thoughts"" I'm constantly communicating in my head with everyone else and that's just how I think. Sometimes it's in the moment and helping me make decisions, otherwise like daydreaming new conversations or interactions, but without the dreaming part, if that makes sense? As in I'm going about my day and interacting with others but still have this almost alternate life in my head.

The few times it's just me thinking I become very manic and focused. I thought this was normal but my boyfriend told me he doesn't think like that. Anyone else think like this?",3.610405679513186,6.179578620689663,4.541994590939827,80.72893509127792,76.01149425287356,7.5423935091277885,26.32724814063557,8.4952907291091,2.1108814063556465,736,28,132,15,17,238,105,174,0.0,0.873,0.127,0.9696,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,3,0,11,4,0,0,5,0,15,3,2,3,0,35,29,17,0,2,11,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,13,8,0,0,10,1,0,2,4,0,0,0,7,0,20,4,15,18,2,20,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,4,13,91,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12855203363997836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682078912449824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17952978016223792,0.2630768861295858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178342676842584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387310225390712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279319651107686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234446236563046,0.1313752769305088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3217300647230765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267069082770965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296018200382676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26350575225311323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604907453956206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055319735462384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09067718560912083,0.18815703434316344,0.0,0.0,0.11361049972788882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713866381465405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12398828279406722,0.0,0.0,0.12578319334067567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902087533869772,0.0,0.3560045935283531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1454272604264183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12696913528758913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025228452487583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4112972281836615,0.0,0.20383560120706545,0.07485825047969999,0.0,0.0,0.12267069082770965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14139024177536832,0.10592530373388608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123751821220629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RagidyyMan,2020/04/08,"Functional dyspepsia and anxiety/stress? Hi everyone - since mid-January I’ve been dealing with (what my GI specialist refers to as) functional dyspepsia. 

I’ve gotten a battery of tests/procedures done (pretty much everything you can think of) and it’s yielded nothing. For all intents and purposes, I’m completely and normally healthy physically speaking which is a relief. 

Yet, for four months now, I’ve had chronic abdominal pain & discomfort (localized primarily to the upper left quadrant) and my GI MD suspects it could be related to stress and anxiety. 

I’ve never been diagnosed with an anxiety disorder - but I would say my job is fairly stressful (I work in healthcare). 

Has anyone else dealt with similar issues to what I’m explaining here? Is there an avenue I can approach from a mental health perspective to help alleviate symptoms?

Any little bit helps - thank you all.",6.434615384615384,9.124548771241834,7.124183006535947,64.94805429864255,67.82352941176471,11.766515837104073,38.566616390145796,11.362043627235082,5.803142182001007,714,41,102,27,13,235,109,153,0.11,0.8029999999999999,0.086,-0.1953,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,0,1,4,6,0,3,6,0,13,5,0,1,3,22,19,8,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,0,5,9,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,4,0,1,5,2,8,2,15,11,4,10,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,4,63,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003451556315385,0.0,0.10044208616943197,0.0,0.2259824893019372,0.0,0.0,0.1032763243359253,0.1513376432180315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16125178568445914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15486221456819774,0.0,0.0,0.1179276306596884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522737628730231,0.0,0.14991391530215534,0.0,0.0,0.16927871739685146,0.0,0.0,0.1511499172754081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12338565216657255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113511464210368,0.13274458602965564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15699978965032255,0.0,0.0,0.1980024065739545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15416199389355864,0.14657094988673575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047811394655034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14803570744688505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14884837411728996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789392963519613,0.0,0.10857759862438736,0.0,0.11391650374809055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471611183081493,0.14172357457229626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15716481171597368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15026552704650098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745816258831705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221802086490498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5075747140698588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535184143341346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359836985959241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464115847070484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075284524750994,0.0,0.0,0.10492290916273936,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Honmath111,2020/04/08,"Is this an acceptable reason to get an Incomplete? I struggle with anxiety and really fear being rejected by my professors in my request

Some Background: I am in a very demanding honors math program in my junior year and actually have an academic history of being a 3.9+ gpa student. Just stating my background, I apologize if this wording sounds very arrogant. 

However, with this global crisis coupled with the fact I have a long history of mental illness (BP2) and attention deficit disorder. This is quite literally the most debilitating experience of my life, I often times cannot even get out of bed and my whole world I feel very far removed from. I have been proactive in seeing multiple psychiatrists, received consistent diagnoses and am on new medications which hopefully help. I want to postpone all my courses to be completed at a later date, perhaps the end of summer, so I can complete my final assessments when I am back to being a proper student. Are such circumstances not good enough for this request to a professor? As I know this is a global crisis and many are affected, so I am certainly not the only one and do not feel entitled to special treatment. Would you expect a public institution to be understanding or is this something I must just scrap and move on from.",9.330158045977008,9.001428021551725,9.802586206896553,59.217701149425295,59.73275862068965,13.595402298850574,43.4712643678161,12.745084868956482,6.1252057471264365,1039,56,156,34,12,351,143,232,0.166,0.745,0.08900000000000001,-0.9582,1,1,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,2,9,9,0,2,15,0,24,4,0,2,4,40,33,14,0,6,7,0,2,0,0,2,4,1,1,0,8,12,0,0,7,0,0,3,4,3,0,1,1,4,22,6,28,25,5,27,0,1,1,0,7,12,0,7,11,125,30,9,0.0,0.0,0.1491887118080757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169526914080676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755519267542998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205832955838516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691586817973298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551698623045291,0.0,0.0,0.17521358985665214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540619844797128,0.15796578564829494,0.0,0.1009757203276168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14954586010995408,0.0,0.17203237057651954,0.15460132390150771,0.0,0.0,0.16747243820570687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974685709693173,0.0,0.0,0.12822839182584184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247216244776504,0.0,0.0,0.1518442182579358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401878508534433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10798358197068017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13529388486956334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549962050722661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540103975051694,0.154066963493554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16248712037309115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14765234285293394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359536471965057,0.11627203942028193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16260657304258894,0.0,0.0,0.09793876723009064,0.157185980977374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12182547266302088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769440232838115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598232466233862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891454887197482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15915334893576466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37842574099587295,0.09017251548399492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17068492878550054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10860148195421596,0.0,0.0,0.09844963175252286
mentalhealth,Throwitintheawaybag,2020/04/08,"Can anyone lend an open ear, to help me understand mental issues others deal with? Hey I would really like someone to speak to about mental health. Especially a female party preferably, because it has to do with trauma only a female can go through. I would like an insight or some enlightenment so I can help someone I know going through anxiety attacks. 

Sorry for the lack of structure and delivery of the post I’m stressed out trying to understand mental health. If I could get an open ear about this situation, I will be grateful!",5.265204081632653,7.4632571020408225,5.92423469387755,74.4073724489796,69.81632653061224,8.16530612244898,30.617346938775512,8.841846274778883,2.866057142857143,428,18,68,8,8,139,67,98,0.124,0.715,0.16,0.7056,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,1,7,0,10,4,2,0,0,19,17,4,0,6,2,0,0,2,0,3,2,3,0,0,3,6,0,0,6,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,3,7,2,15,12,2,6,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,3,2,48,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221392390317467,0.0,0.0,0.11163777957620408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18163596621067007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732707562646173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12747528460354696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16460214753154553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08341560732216934,0.0,0.1814765819692387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33942160554597123,0.0,0.0,0.21403307256329093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664325346569786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08774479963774427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560033364695417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4826982976059117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142840189894813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290986551770808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228209677922362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794642004187058,0.0,0.0,0.2705583036604146,0.0,0.0,0.17872597072386032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18288965521104952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083984608783996,0.0,0.0,0.3324227718803472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22683535032684,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beauabbott87,2020/04/08,idk what to do lol is there anybody that i can talk to about some stuff i genuinely have nobody and idk what to do,8.026,4.183168400000003,7.848000000000002,83.32400000000003,65.0,11.6,33.0,8.841846274778883,2.239,90,2,22,1,1,29,19,25,0.109,0.7809999999999999,0.109,0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,18,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.81841506434092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5746275162745409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,purplebricker,2020/04/08,"Help: Handling features at work, tips and habits for schizo and bipolar disorders. **Background:**

I was diagnosed 3 years ago with bipolar, after a mental break that had me hospitalised for over a month. A year later I was diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder having a second episode - not similar to the last - and another hospitalisation. 

For 3 years I have been slowly gaining my personality, social capabilities and motivations back. It was a long recovery and many times I didn't think I would see the end of it but somehow I have come back healthier and am back on solid ground with a rational mindset.

**Current:**

Throughout my recovery I was volunteering full time for a charity. This was the closest option available to me for work purposes. This did not disturb my mental health conditions and I have stayed well during this time.

January of this year I got a full time job. I work for a government base call centre and offer welfare advise and support. Until last week I was in good spirits and felt mentally well. 

As of last Tuesday I no longer feel that way. I have had two panic attacks whilst at work, am dissociating from my surroundings and have days at a time where I feel disconnected. I have spoken to my case manager who has advised that I decrease my hours to half, take extra breaks (at approval of management), bring some things to help me feel grounded like stress balls or similar items.

  
Anyway I guess what I want to know is do any of your have techniques to help you stay mentally healthy whilst working? I am wanting to keep my job I do not want to be out of work. Any strategies and tips I would love to have them. At this point I am feeling very disheartened and worried that my health conditions are going to have me giving up work.

Note: as my diagnosis is quite new I am still learning what my triggers are, what my conditions may present as and what affects my every day life. Prior to my original diagnosis 3 years ago I had no previous mental heath conditions, worked full time, completed school and had normal social interests.",5.049696618037135,7.390711883289128,5.530947446949604,76.39215061339526,70.75066312997347,8.956531830238726,31.409897214854112,9.516144504307137,3.2650637267904514,1648,74,280,40,32,528,202,377,0.069,0.7759999999999999,0.155,0.9843,3,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,2,1,12,9,12,1,3,13,0,39,8,0,4,0,49,60,21,0,6,5,0,5,1,0,3,7,0,0,1,17,20,0,1,9,1,0,3,6,5,2,3,15,6,44,7,43,41,6,65,1,1,1,1,16,19,0,6,39,196,61,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333354094039682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228857574755618,0.07886256011154097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556040719730583,0.0,0.17349184116267047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679618050011032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647853732256064,0.078854571671144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970063863877996,0.0,0.0,0.15266987640151242,0.0,0.0,0.17239067374296174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661231528478018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06336631683105019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15211049788283826,0.0,0.0722118538297253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07214674592529316,0.042742664280636215,0.06308123381844549,0.06015102421435661,0.0,0.08285052659610438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988601480167985,0.0,0.0,0.15123180632325045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07406511988563845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14926545516577874,0.06684867744333503,0.0,0.0,0.04133256723915504,0.18391464053109996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05312191384336603,0.03674302306678345,0.0,0.0,0.06655706325362191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06787851317500355,0.0,0.0,0.07624950850522104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789618667695157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06003062367364913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07263673692482618,0.0,0.0,0.07368825923193108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08824084744097914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06566906993511189,0.0,0.0,0.07109624314915755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999338608603301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611491132346042,0.05993135386534515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333097577550514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16032428538944307,0.060061521712397266,0.0,0.08615096282133261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534559583345122,0.0,0.0,0.056547353536093976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04996511605065528,0.04819050298665211,0.0,0.0,0.26312772098527154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346767409279878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205480266050387,0.13307958055737554,0.05969692360120645,0.060327638284693924,0.0,0.13524275924901386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4380208605967429,0.07637777622512791,0.0,0.10685177250741999,0.0,0.0,0.24215870414859186
mentalhealth,mrs_melon,2020/04/08,"i need a new outlet I’m 19 and I was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder, anxiety, and depression. At college, I was allowed to go and receive counseling for free as well as discounted psychiatric appointements. I really enjoyed being able to talk to someone and get help. Now due to COVID-19, I’ve moved back home and needless to say, my parents aren’t super supportive of my conditions. They believe that if I’ve been diagnosed then I should be hospitalized for the best help. I can manage myself perfectly fine but without someone to talk to, I’ve fallen into some slumps. I haven’t been doing work, I’ve been sleeping in late, and I have my hypomania swings at night. I’m taking meds but I was wondering if there is a way that I can get help during this time. I’m open to any activities, coping mechanisms, or any practices. Thanks!!",4.591799709724236,6.630801232704402,5.8038993710691855,75.2358635703919,71.26415094339623,9.67218190614417,32.35655539429124,10.035473477838034,3.706902854378326,672,32,116,19,13,224,103,159,0.055,0.76,0.185,0.9488,3,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,4,4,10,0,0,3,0,16,4,1,1,1,21,27,14,0,4,6,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,1,0,3,9,0,0,1,0,2,4,3,1,1,0,6,1,15,10,19,18,2,19,0,1,0,0,9,5,0,5,9,74,18,3,0.15456296739534742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21021623603765868,0.0,0.1182402469999951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188493813244218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17413953555356285,0.16220429850412035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133124857334278,0.3137563167627473,0.0,0.0,0.17714255134257875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16150554222569322,0.0,0.08784169627575733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31080089699273616,0.0,0.15503925859158876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435375951093854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168461304944865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16427597360882046,0.0,0.11460648186340153,0.0,0.1492778770532386,0.0,0.14504687451797493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17162388399855308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901699472443364,0.0,0.15261228368758215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12291467537603705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467459092191668,0.0,0.26192140139658115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17539622374620892,0.0,0.0,0.11621211588267193,0.2484637169024664,0.0,0.1423008141880586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012690925068524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268488920448295,0.0,0.0,0.1389706699545779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899318497676106,0.16761694492548931,0.11252368109987004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Merlocked,2020/04/08,"Can we take a mental health break from this pandemic? Seriously, all my coping mechanisms have been stripped away. I'm trapped in my house, all the things I was looking forward to have been cancelled or postponed indefinitely, I can't get my hands on any books because libraries and bookstores are closed, can't treat myself to my favourite chocolates or a chai tea latte because chocolatiers and cafes are closed. Normally I can push through something unpleasant by reminding myself why I'm doing it and how much longer I have to put up with it (you bet your bonnet I counted down from the first day of high school to the last) but we don't know how long this is going to last and isolation isn't going to further my career. I can't even sleep properly at this point because I'm just too depressed and anxious about everything. I just wish I could step away from this pandemic for awhile because I feel burnt out.",11.019512799339388,8.084855410404625,9.395392237819983,71.72109826589595,58.479768786127174,12.429066886870356,43.21139554087532,10.290406445055957,4.3349164327002505,738,32,135,11,7,225,112,173,0.12300000000000001,0.856,0.021,-0.9198,0,2,1,0,0,0,12.0,2,2,0,1,8,3,0,0,5,0,18,4,2,2,2,27,29,10,0,3,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,11,1,0,2,1,1,6,5,2,0,1,3,3,20,1,23,25,3,25,0,1,1,0,4,14,0,4,6,91,27,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149367748330374,0.0,0.0,0.1909401360188398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175924649648962,0.0,0.0,0.4121226944782494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494563930962264,0.0,0.0,0.109001431568838,0.0,0.14557335856179146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163357015359704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15190081346038986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08545964159305779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437650471234904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830396020294409,0.0,0.19211154107031225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17965625924409656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17857483747915956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950219395048213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09288685347936601,0.27554143393153496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14957397024686864,0.14193099451783173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17032852176450786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12424631427857664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559993718323526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597748884582515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16990790892201116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17105336271006186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691382070602743,0.0,0.0,0.13011688628100435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12707910718832105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122868169988759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525107826434155,0.0,0.19436022626329336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kiwibird203422,2020/04/08,"I (16F) miss my dad.  I can't help but think about how he won't be able to walk me down the isle if I ever get married, or that he'll never know that I want to become a doctor. Or that I've gotten a job and I work hard at school. This isn't because he's dead, but because he's mentally abusive. After my parents devorced, I slowly stoped talking to him because I just couldn't take the way he treated me and my mother. Anymore. And my mother has met someone who is great and is willing to take care of me like his own, but I just don't feel right. I miss the dad I remember from when I was very young. I don't even know if there real of if it was just a way for me to get over what was happening. I don't know how to get rid of these thoughts.",2.3450930996714128,2.4992845060241,4.085815991237681,92.647847754655,74.42168674698793,6.759255202628697,24.729463307776562,6.1124844417494595,0.4704891566265066,572,16,141,3,11,194,95,166,0.085,0.804,0.111,0.8519,2,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,10,6,0,0,6,0,15,1,0,2,2,29,34,15,1,5,11,5,2,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,7,0,0,1,8,2,0,0,6,2,23,4,16,23,1,12,0,2,0,0,16,4,0,5,6,91,31,4,0.16413951576694716,0.19447848589158867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627822940372227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30017377597087824,0.18127919937778014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16735117564968027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16800374957427872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841260212742684,0.14847358917582604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299387101239403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25726836713864903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18096439559645355,0.0,0.0,0.14514803171363602,0.0,0.14703676584062955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001925750608607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16288314225592454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706203557390023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019027639654043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16541402586696144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12659451343964426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822575076571232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18682670365595294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185938074277634,0.14017424962189556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611795294667311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13907487905647295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468249768839299,0.13192912527912007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517397404029766,0.0,0.13030844095712765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354322905884457,0.09681373910755746,0.2605726151004469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949552237053528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PitifulYogurtcloset4,2020/04/08,"Any suggestions (thought stopping)? When I was in therapy, a big part of it was learning to sit with emotions and process them. I found I got a lot from it and I was able to better handle my own emotions and cope with the negative spirals they could send me into. My question is: does anyone have any advice on processing overwhelming sadness/depressive episodes when the thoughts start leading to darker places? I find lately more often than not that’s where thoughts have been drifting and I want to be able to get myself away from them during quarantine until I can start going back to therapy to work through the feelings further.

Any words of encouragement or advice you have is appreciated.",7.453095238095237,8.546640619047622,6.7540873015873,74.69160714285714,63.444444444444436,9.474603174603176,37.17857142857143,9.516144504307137,3.6857809523809517,562,27,92,10,8,173,88,126,0.03,0.885,0.086,0.7149,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,3,3,5,3,0,1,5,0,12,0,0,1,0,24,23,8,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,8,0,0,4,2,1,0,0,9,1,15,2,20,12,4,21,0,1,0,0,8,8,0,4,8,71,18,3,0.2966278448776196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898612969727451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30257565947850396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037045430396772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13934581232703866,0.11404425148336934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117161179406253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841659865368252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277425640700274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12979051299608846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3336664004709088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07499197551981257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13555623817581788,0.0,0.0,0.16261856068755626,0.0,0.0,0.07748790304287474,0.0,0.08429022001765946,0.0,0.11862019250897785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16730456461072465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12609119310141895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606095249149985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495648193930298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661455363671781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209954715339518,0.0,0.0,0.12399708021667599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3392197919905756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532340627715459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874793941356374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797430194574442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hawkvand,2020/04/08,"How can I help my mom with past trauma wear a mask? So before my mom was with my father she was married to a horribly abusive man. I mean, truly horrible. From what she’s shared with me over my life he used to hold a gun to her head, and wake her up at night by plugging her nose and holding his hand over her mouth to almost smother her because he was a monster and thought it was fun. Luckily she got out of that situation and hopefully that man is dead or in prison forever. Growing up we couldn’t have balloons because if they popped they terrified my mother, and she has never been able to wear a scarf or have anything over her face.

My mom has gotten around her issues with things on her face with minimal issue for the most part. She just gets a lot colder in the winter. She does have pretty bad undiagnosed sleep apnea that she can’t get treatment for though. She did a sleep study and when they tried to fit the cpap to her she absolutely wigged and left the sleep clinic. She knows apnea is bad for her health and increases her risk of other issues but refused to see a therapist to try to work through it at that point because it didn’t seem worth it to her.

So now we are at the point with covid where it looks like mask wearing is going to become necessary and maybe even required in some places and she is panicking. She said she tried to practice with a bandana at home and started tearing up when telling me about it. I did not ask for details but she said it did not go well.

I don’t know what to do for her. I know she should see a therapist, but with everything going on getting anything other than telehealth appointments isn’t possible or even a good idea and I don’t know if those would be as effective. She says she almost wishes she would have done the therapy for the cpap in the past now, but we obviously didn’t foresee this in the future. She is in her late 60s and I want to keep her safe during all of this. Does anyone have any creative mask alternatives that are looser/ don’t need to tie or fit as snugly? Any therapy recommendations? How can I support her?

TLDR; my mom probably has undiagnosed ptsd from past trauma that makes her unable to have things over her face. How can I help her acclimate to wearing a mask?",5.598935082075394,5.7822642048997785,5.875511012125712,82.55726222882123,67.30734966592428,9.057197063433144,29.769941433638536,8.841846274778883,2.1296834281943413,1784,59,363,27,27,570,215,449,0.081,0.805,0.115,0.9446,0,0,0,1,0,0,30.0,3,0,3,3,17,14,1,1,21,0,41,18,15,6,3,75,71,33,1,10,13,6,1,1,0,3,3,3,1,2,22,26,0,6,9,0,1,5,11,6,1,0,16,8,63,8,64,50,6,46,0,0,3,0,64,28,0,13,14,257,85,2,0.08118736959724725,0.09619375711581647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625948463208049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11042039071931857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05676809652276279,0.0,0.13362057513265369,0.07227397166346114,0.07589923108413345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355761248300157,0.1484732008576843,0.08966507115247989,0.06908447179493628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14209522849316014,0.08308286675064404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072469838453261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07296597280219387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725114918836508,0.0,0.13842195931734655,0.06809611370951031,0.06493295607427729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332166376347154,0.08629837738931485,0.0,0.0,0.10883636496946464,0.0,0.08143755131953685,0.08063737683513766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916506581147004,0.0,0.25421556215610336,0.0,0.07216306443233575,0.0,0.0,0.17847382039001733,0.0,0.09158288917860298,0.0,0.08821031461844654,0.0,0.05734504014230149,0.039664047852773984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06817694290015726,0.0,0.0,0.0690225983437683,0.0,0.0,0.05419319963641931,0.0,0.08156362508459385,0.08843684638436854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3803426641540106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060199405834934015,0.06261670447597202,0.0,0.0,0.07618884658377002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08791800962240746,0.2325075924687807,0.0,0.0,0.08482352137835023,0.0,0.15349661269270753,0.09152656059445707,0.0,0.0825967422666327,0.08753371600095647,0.0,0.09490369043379744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445556041509648,0.06456345492614017,0.0,0.0,0.12939164440965953,0.0739099320969791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09125800504474656,0.2437380064338492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05746483807002965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213046490509848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07096133950616204,0.0,0.18568966536774445,0.18852958723673816,0.10787456167667414,0.0,0.079766178418505,0.06445370274302814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536268403287646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011982026134002,0.0,0.0,0.04788641408067026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299719547904465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336146831796772,0.0,0.0,0.05910537200370111,0.0,0.0,0.11534635596490793,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KaiChxmp00,2020/04/08,"Non stop overthinking I’m 19M and ive had this mindset for years and it has gotten worst over the years since becoming an adult 

My problem is i think of the worst situations for example 

Chats to girl*

*thinks she’s gonna call me ugly in my mind


And i recently lost my lifetime friend and i’m too shy to call/Text him

Thankyou for reading.",-0.22512163892445614,2.0580627746478903,1.7188220230473767,94.2357490396927,97.30985915492955,5.398719590268887,20.539052496798977,6.980632752743323,0.6763126760563383,271,10,59,5,11,89,54,71,0.266,0.693,0.040999999999999995,-0.9477,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,9,11,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,4,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,3,0,9,1,8,7,2,6,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,0,4,32,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675680102702317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.49476919946361103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871770817203084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644661554258608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24462348066819375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318195229646335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24233540724290115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23921224486026646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20040811981292625,0.2723214571427716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20254843903211836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3104734692426581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120276748518035
mentalhealth,redkcouch,2020/04/08,"How are people high on life? I see many people who just seem so happy all the time, and I wonder, is this real? Are they really that happy all the time? What do they have that I don’t?

Sometimes I’m pretty happy but other times I just gotta ask myself “is this it?” Off and on anxiety and what seems to be depression.

I guess what I really am doing is comparing myself to others to gauge if my thoughts on this are normal or abnormal.",1.8313333333333333,3.5859909666666674,4.137500000000003,85.43625000000003,78.22222222222223,7.166666666666668,17.916666666666668,8.07648339933343,0.6536666666666666,337,6,69,6,8,117,58,90,0.076,0.8,0.124,0.5532,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,12,1,0,1,2,18,21,8,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,12,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,1,11,3,7,18,2,8,0,1,1,0,4,5,0,6,3,56,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333594331841491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629719135957346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15014731419514682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19204049198133488,0.0,0.0,0.556721977927313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18418570880845309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231320896631425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767398920475436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708031335170001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24171234052071494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735290531527936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19842192701146505,0.22335627042539755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13891579395162856,0.31740092476624626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1724135442191155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13839591158332315,0.3049538673319364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18904984837627176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JG19866,2020/04/08,"Help with depression and anxiety Hi everyone,

This is my first post, but I have seen some really encouraging stuff in this community so far. I'm really hoping for some advice from anyone who feels they can help.

I'm 33 years old and have suffered from anxiety and depression for most of my life. I'm in ciprolex and a low dosage of seroquel. Even on the medication I feel the following everyday:

- anxiety
- no desire to do anything
- no interest in anything
- can't maintain focus on any specific task
- constantly worrying about everything

Socially I enjoy seeing friends and engaging in conversation for the most part, but only after my wife forces me to go out. I feel like I'm gradually getting worse and I can't seem to figure out what the answer is. I've been on SSRI's for years and I can't shake this. 

If anyone has any suggestions or are able to share some advice, I would greatly appreciate it!",5.554122807017542,6.914548111111111,7.011944444444449,70.17125000000001,67.8888888888889,11.314035087719299,32.37865497076024,11.20814326018867,4.18432514619883,721,31,125,24,12,247,108,171,0.157,0.624,0.22,0.9445,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,1,3,14,0,1,5,0,13,2,0,0,0,28,27,12,0,4,4,1,3,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,7,10,0,0,6,0,0,3,5,5,0,1,2,5,12,9,24,24,6,22,0,4,2,0,12,11,0,9,8,83,19,0,0.14612972768609075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28559255730587124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19874645165684576,0.0,0.3353665251156177,0.0,0.0,0.20435460656703705,0.0,0.2405046296518463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15791432209182762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517226406600849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965173069543779,0.0,0.0,0.1396332170559639,0.13133197674502342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216627430753858,0.10439510665704343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242978717193828,0.0,0.0,0.11289946511981125,0.0,0.07634675143389295,0.0,0.08304889180490141,0.0,0.0,0.1611085406571722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19589535237105532,0.0,0.0,0.14513979177666184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321574823415128,0.07139160364976843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14721032701666914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333856754049796,0.0,0.0,0.11113824276299417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15824425484602864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399518851356228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18722889084247898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644647348619196,0.13303101583667046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14896085482542995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16728357696953422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14840183177100727,0.14891867672402515,0.103806365881488,0.0,0.0,0.1882055071570488
mentalhealth,ookruskoo,2020/04/08,I guess death doesn't fear me anymore Idk if I have a death wish or maybe it's just my body saying to let go but driving all I think about is just all the ways I could die and all the possible outcomes. When I'm working I think if a shooter came in would I run or just let it happen or would I protect people and just go out in a blaze of glory. Sometimes I think what if I just randomly had a medical issue come out of no where and just go out in the middle of the night idk anymore my mind just thinks of these things.,1.7188596491228054,2.855457728070178,3.220175438596492,94.53622807017548,76.98245614035088,6.119298245614036,22.3157894736842,6.42735559955562,0.2211999999999996,407,11,97,3,9,134,67,114,0.13699999999999998,0.7609999999999999,0.102,-0.4653,0,0,0,1,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,10,2,0,1,8,0,9,2,1,0,3,36,22,11,3,7,14,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,5,8,0,1,4,0,0,7,2,1,0,0,2,1,12,1,12,15,3,18,0,0,0,0,1,8,0,8,2,69,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169130612771352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17747698947716647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18274310714396516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376343285205159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275694807779228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658240120808831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17979431721816566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27241602253136404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17601313425973916,0.0,0.1412908797630062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16676639229226198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3267670177314923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051816083490453,0.0,0.0,0.16095920884624262,0.0,0.0,0.16132991502725924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994053436290278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076972935594087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801253335531519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706162865054912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802421663128313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061491947130358,0.4095163577455301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12682408984479046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18373645324988208,0.0,0.0,0.1163200581099356,0.0,0.0,0.2270029673067153,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HIS_HAIR_WHACK,2020/04/08,"Log #2- VENT  Not good at introductions so I'll skip that. I know this is selfish but I just want someone to listen, or more so read. I'm a bit scared, but not scared like startled, it's just this looming sense of fear all the time. 
I put up covers over my windows, even though I'm on the second floor, that tall woman still sees me. I needed to write this down to calm myself down. My perception of time is sort of wonky, on account that I barely leave my room and I only have my phone as a clock. I keep hearing screaming in the woods around 9PM. It always lasts for a while. I'm not sure who it is, but it's a little kid. No one else ever seems to notice it. Maybe everyone notices but I don't knowsince I'm on quarantine. The pestilence has mostly happened in a pattern, 1720, 1820, 1920, now it's 2020. Maybe I should go out and help that kid tonight. They seem to be screaming from the woods. Sometimes there's faces on the ground who try to bite my feet. There's a person in the mirror. I don't know who it is, they're definitely not me, they appear randomly, it usually startles me too much to scream. There's a thing on the ceiling. It's nice but I don't trust it. I can't tell it's gender since it speaks with the voice of a man and a woman at the same time. 
I gotta go, end of the log",0.26934782608695684,2.3296028913043467,1.9784347826086977,97.26439130434784,85.30434782608697,4.694492753623189,18.257971014492753,5.8886186174403665,-0.4435715942028988,1002,25,234,7,30,327,155,276,0.15,0.784,0.066,-0.971,0,1,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,2,0,14,15,0,5,20,0,12,2,2,0,3,36,31,14,0,3,12,0,0,1,0,2,0,7,2,6,23,6,0,1,5,1,1,4,9,9,0,2,0,8,24,6,32,28,6,37,0,0,1,0,18,21,0,7,13,146,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11725419836510008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12544596948497866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384482186519394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771803702956805,0.0,0.12481059915014928,0.0,0.0,0.09307432228481252,0.12746745690589464,0.0,0.1346521930214555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15857075592537329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017271026634894,0.11819445930307935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461240130406777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15882365412905544,0.0,0.0944536670987871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12525346774733784,0.0,0.0,0.15488855054739284,0.11486612937880993,0.0,0.14921071259370092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688449080916544,0.14123581295663706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831400513338333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359017884990332,0.10448813941687468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.320869783228502,0.0,0.0,0.0954889782597803,0.10717369714822376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12304325302602212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166046514491304,0.0,0.0,0.1409550929559421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821649178932911,0.0,0.11229257160383398,0.2565710136879579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656796453620212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11939848192010845,0.0,0.1393704755158177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253646534797428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13281256600941466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12316763317994905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361896586581923,0.0,0.13845019657166502,0.0,0.24650943574610076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567336501046232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552001215484034,0.0,0.0831164733478428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway149162535,2020/04/08,"I (16M) can't seem to be happy I've felt like this for about a year,  I have no motivation to do anything including schoolwork, if I do force myself to study I just keep yawning and give up v quickly. The only time I don't just feel kinda low/sad is either when I use substances or play video games and I know that's not a good thing so I've tried going to the gym etc and I do go but it just feels like a chore and I don't feel any better after going. I don't know if this is related but I recently moved to a new school and I just isolate myself like I have friends who get on the train home with me but I just go sit by myself and it's not because I don't like them I just kind of have a drive to not want to. Similar thing with talking to people I'd just say it was social anxiety but when Im actually there and talking to people I'm fine and I know id be fine so idk why I just don't want to.
P.s sorry if this is abit hard to read I just never really talk about emotions and I'm tired of feeling like this",-0.2726521739130412,1.4109133869565231,2.4186956521739127,95.53282608695652,84.69565217391305,5.391304347826088,18.26086956521739,6.498293943080001,-0.2309130434782607,789,19,195,8,23,275,119,230,0.10300000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.141,0.8826,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,2,17,13,0,0,8,0,18,2,0,2,1,48,39,21,0,5,21,0,6,5,1,0,2,1,2,0,11,11,0,1,10,5,0,6,11,0,0,0,2,7,24,13,22,35,2,18,0,0,0,0,10,2,0,6,14,122,35,3,0.0,0.0,0.12482917431464068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869883886625613,0.0,0.09785665232584836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526532687699204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07797741231214554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131327665407979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389013930181954,0.0,0.0,0.14266199354796982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2587160298750013,0.1827687898153152,0.1228210044196316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09882885928040812,0.0,0.06683169265655348,0.12271026611568404,0.29079419403343804,0.10729125602951692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361707173249218,0.11458908904931968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283118329823434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13817301306396354,0.0,0.0,0.11369908501552192,0.0,0.13320654825144446,0.2109005857483728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31247051274415416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359562183165031,0.0,0.0,0.09865797775648752,0.12354366373016892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09728713721574936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17736398471746093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12795226659669934,0.0,0.0819473222776646,0.0,0.12630324753524988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10172524972835917,0.0,0.12945949126444362,0.0,0.11645142454926476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13039593539445754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319333669811574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3084460855428568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16996560575097155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458981055535141,0.14702252153178114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868476877940716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047977892683243,0.0,0.0,0.15089828871532535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542578304540585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237477282502166
mentalhealth,johnojacob99,2020/04/08,"How to Let Go of Thoughts Hi,

  I am a college student in Computer Science. I am actually doing fairly well. I typically do 7-9 hours of homework a day, 5 days a week (and 4 hours on Sunday). Even tho I am doing well..i can't seem to let go after my homework is done for the day. I don't know if it's imagined stress or fear that i'll fail, but every day after i finish for the day, i cant stop recycling what i still have to do for the next day.

   I just feel very stressed and have an imagined sense that i gave no time to take care if myself since I am so busy.

   I grew up with an emotionally abusive father who would never beat me, but would constsntly belittle me with words and tell me how i wasn't good enough.",5.016428571428573,3.661662298701298,6.552564935064938,82.370275974026,68.87012987012987,9.51818181818182,30.288961038961038,8.472884824447931,1.9369766233766232,550,17,128,7,8,191,98,154,0.168,0.777,0.054000000000000006,-0.9529,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,8,7,0,3,8,0,20,0,0,2,1,24,29,12,0,4,6,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,5,5,0,1,6,0,0,3,6,4,1,0,4,1,18,3,16,21,1,24,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,4,18,86,23,6,0.0,0.16202292805356652,0.13344542350131575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394227611741225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5291433204969936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13993973980885607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15382205868314047,0.0,0.1412962878295577,0.0,0.09032015625822867,0.0,0.11521531225653905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538784822879359,0.06914343213996446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15543303313336362,0.11469696228830815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26933665523574685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515261859894215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27966630719069663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105467777831434,0.0,0.14543207031488306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12448940523421816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311859719371195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920639426064717,0.1143266815160825,0.3132866348892009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028167853327005,0.0,0.11952297477630353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856190625495953,0.07973832169515807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283066182638615,0.0,0.0,0.10969025864644616,0.0,0.24590409410817604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942824034957097,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Oldyvon,2020/04/08,"Sadness/ fear of death and outside. I've been stuck with this existential dread for awhile now. It keeps getting worse and worse. I used to be Christian and that offered some form of security for me. As long as I kept my ass out of Hell then I would be ok. But now, now is just emptiness. Fear of death all the time, I don't feel safe I haven't felt safe in a long time. Its crippling me. I'm scared of living my final moments in pain or in dread, losing my life and my memories, all the people who I love,and  all my possessions. It fucks me up really bad. I'm so scared to go outside, i can't look at the clear blue sky cuz it scares me. It makes me feel as though I'll fall through the atmosphere.  I have so many fears like that. Like I fear zombies... I fear being eaten alive so much. I live my life based off these fears... I can't escape the thoughts and fears that are constantly running through my mind.


The other night I was crying and begging god to show himself. To give me some sense of security. Idk if he ever answered. I'll never know. What if I die while in still agnostic and I go to hell? Will god forgive me? Idk... i live in fear of him even though i don't believe in him. I'm all mixed up inside and its tearing me apart.


I've set up an appointment with a therapist, are there any questions I should ask him? Are there any questions you have for me? Or any advice? I'm so sick of this existential dread.",0.5582268632268637,2.7514117432432457,2.100073710073712,95.98210892710895,85.28378378378378,5.20950040950041,20.118345618345614,6.574015621080383,0.07125360360360401,1100,33,252,12,33,356,153,296,0.299,0.632,0.069,-0.9977,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,0,1,15,29,3,14,9,1,19,7,1,3,7,45,41,25,3,4,6,0,3,2,0,3,4,0,0,0,15,11,1,6,9,1,0,4,6,21,0,0,7,5,39,8,35,28,8,35,4,2,2,2,13,14,4,8,18,157,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953122126297395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16603949526271428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760866112858435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06795541774427039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169618590074817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795130383896378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940068229998495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446769228694334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053755877726700096,0.07361992931411103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7326712637645025,0.08230423944559302,0.0,0.07814505627336361,0.08915636235690319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524171441206648,0.042521769042427264,0.07807459885417467,0.09250913051920226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234122077695483,0.0,0.0,0.044728609245270265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11497322742681908,0.07952394109636758,0.0,0.21560076917080126,0.1440512928973753,0.06834525829848384,0.09105213578853072,0.0,0.0,0.07345567175606027,0.0,0.05432699193621125,0.08251446011906771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08217848216429838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598294013992628,0.0,0.06277129274448982,0.0,0.0,0.07637694178891248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08660236296552745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056424056423033934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823459365244748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052139112044388966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444501735713071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499640633996709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09449751476442113,0.0,0.0,0.15992621069793075,0.06461282619722443,0.09491576739354188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07029293223990381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16588225324153782,0.057815561661040016,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cattsuit,2020/04/08,"Having Social Media followers, and depression I get really sensitive about this, as alot of people follow my friends that I have. It shows the work I have been scared to do, and that is form friendships in real life. I think I am ugly and have gender  dysphoria as well as body dysmorphia as I sometimes wish my nose and lips where not big or ugly. I know after covid I have to do more personal work. For bonds and friendships and not just know people off the top of my head. It sucks because I have no real support. I'm worthless to these people online and in real life. Why don't I know people that genuinely connect with people. I have low confidence. it sucks.",4.152093023255812,5.7896543255813935,5.0828604651162825,81.59731395348838,71.6356589147287,7.950697674418605,25.3031007751938,8.548686976883017,1.807073798449612,524,16,96,9,10,171,77,129,0.175,0.6809999999999999,0.14400000000000002,-0.6705,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,4,9,2,1,3,0,13,6,4,0,0,21,25,12,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,1,8,8,0,0,4,1,0,2,4,6,1,0,1,1,14,3,16,24,3,10,0,3,0,0,3,7,2,2,1,70,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09230323859008367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16819168454189035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13041642819209506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169854642165968,0.0,0.07910985360687797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553989413373194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496467439467513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21390255850763512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5248721941787816,0.1322126883018113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5170417959430464,0.09700249105131699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515962128018598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543519691024302,0.0,0.0,0.14975664885868253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718277824097407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970227834317947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13614330758251136,0.0,0.13663153567136088,0.0,0.17412366343877952,0.0,0.0,0.22046876698951087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dehydrated_water0_0,2020/04/08,"I don't know what to do Let me start with the beginning. For 2 years I've been bullied. (Mentally and physically) Now I changed schools and I realized nobody cares about me. I lost all my friends one year ago. My parents tell me daily that I'm a failure and I don't do anything, that I only play those stupid video games even though my grades are perfect and that I actually like what I chose to do. For the past 6 months, I tried to fake my happiness. I tried to hide that I'm miserable until today when I got into a fight with my family. Now I don't even know what to think. I tried to make them understand that I need some professional help, but for them, it is a shame that their only son needs some help with his mental health. Everybody told me this is just because I'm a teenager and that it is normal, but after 3 years of humiliation, I believe it's not the case. I'm on the edge and I try to find a reason to live, but there is nothing: my parents tell me I'm a failure, I don't have friends, nobody really cares about me. I got to the point when I hope that I won't wake up the next morning, and now my suicidal thoughts came back. I want to hurt myself, more than that I just want to die. The world would be a better place if I just stop existing. If I'm gone I can't disappoint anyone. 
I'm going to try to get some help but if this doesn't work I don't know what I'm gonna do. 3 years of pain and misery. I just can't take it anymore. Should I search for a person to vent to, to talk to? Or should I see a doctor and get some meds?",2.696618068211404,3.216544371257488,4.311202811767771,90.01818927362667,73.85029940119759,7.724863316844572,24.10257745378808,7.893859768569023,0.9225557406925272,1196,32,286,16,23,403,163,334,0.171,0.7040000000000001,0.125,-0.9667,2,0,0,0,1,4,35.0,0,0,3,4,16,19,2,2,16,0,25,4,1,2,2,53,61,21,2,12,13,3,0,1,2,5,3,0,0,1,20,14,0,1,9,3,0,3,10,9,0,1,8,1,46,10,34,46,6,29,0,4,1,0,19,6,0,9,21,180,66,5,0.0,0.0,0.09796943157848888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899265092347168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956323065879497,0.07019736737131617,0.0,0.0826151762653548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719629230613279,0.0,0.0611988567746728,0.0,0.0,0.11310893114329335,0.0,0.08878976322447656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11482325186950056,0.2047154305175181,0.0,0.10620285683736867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.104192451374783,0.0,0.0,0.10275685183906703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13261772695579496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464191936175304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917577067675891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1551273125118551,0.0,0.10490276775343356,0.0,0.05705585663807315,0.0,0.16058747258590467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687059212882273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671344068612773,0.0,0.0,0.20187464693456836,0.0,0.0,0.09971325290580543,0.0,0.0,0.1074731618306636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16552068551906698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265900631226016,0.0,0.04904712169516183,0.0,0.08864917086437676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10959120519588994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701334335526635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115143842209228,0.0,0.2023457761054311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801330173460788,0.0,0.0,0.1488807998075238,0.0,0.0,0.1067694709057702,0.0,0.09836417138252496,0.09633013077680684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068029134863815,0.1527073392138515,0.1068256069027449,0.0,0.22294987770615696,0.0,0.09583681612791513,0.0,0.08765960435158847,0.10488968728301752,0.0,0.09490416951995262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431455328452358,0.10322108839086387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160343398290304,0.08000050515839922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105893267563705,0.0,0.0,0.08393333925217072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981403476397664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548330809316113,0.08069237510422664,0.17549643280631594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.064328007530609,0.09863596056993948,0.07970110902132742,0.0,0.0,0.09516116089542856,0.09593015199978663,0.0,0.3408024868307307,0.0,0.0,0.10451302206502293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11842920257042225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308755738354616,0.0,0.0,0.07131655824821008,0.0,0.0,0.2586001137757427
mentalhealth,Bendbender,2020/04/08,"No help for mental health My parents are good people for the most part, my mom at least, I’ve struggled with depression, anger issues and an inability to focus on much of anything especially school work due to severe ADD since I was about 12, I’m a senior in high school now and for the past several years they’ve steadfastly refused to get me diagnosed with anything much less help, my dad is one of those people who thinks depression is a mood and blames fucking video games for every issue I’ve ever had in my life and while my mom does try to help the furthest she’ll go is essential oils and self help books, I’ve been getting worse and worse and I’ve tried to talk to them about it but they’re so stuck in their ways they can’t imagine how I could possibly need anything more than fucking lavender oil and a good book, I’m sick of it and I’m sick of hating myself, I need some actual help and I don’t know how to get it, I have a job so I have a bit of money of my own that I’m damn near willing to use, I just don’t know who to see to sort all this shit out, I have talked to a therapist some and while she really tries to help, nothing she suggests has ever clicked with me and I don’t think a therapist could help with my ADD, I’m not sure if it’s of any importance but I have had 3 concussions over my life, one of which was due to a seizure I had when I was only a week old, I know I can’t blame everything on things outside my control within my own head but I do need help",4.267666335650446,4.064816597484281,5.223531943065211,87.42257696127113,70.13207547169812,8.707315458457463,27.1142005958292,8.371475516178862,1.4767962264150942,1170,33,269,16,19,385,165,318,0.162,0.745,0.09300000000000001,-0.9668,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,3,2,11,13,6,1,13,0,26,10,2,4,4,49,49,23,0,6,6,4,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,11,19,0,2,6,4,1,1,7,9,0,2,8,4,34,3,42,37,13,26,0,2,2,2,26,11,4,5,13,168,45,7,0.0,0.0,0.08395701824432107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058506240821382886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212396573580544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392711925774552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649472797440954,0.13738269727357744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482023483878996,0.08732295361079018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528915269755312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556458109038275,0.07248756697191658,0.0,0.07732203714770505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590745571554846,0.1348480354165179,0.0,0.04889524742082781,0.1443228954991138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494101099306875,0.08829596225891784,0.09145038551562548,0.0,0.0,0.4613355585899679,0.0908999096361622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17959481098444227,0.08537571867062607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14184652283915175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215370714275286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670228938980143,0.0,0.0,0.20152454957531432,0.0,0.0,0.1264901472119988,0.19137992061822764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255218405168327,0.0,0.0902784737532822,0.0,0.11659806992614564,0.06543292462683904,0.0,0.0,0.09553085410702193,0.09316670969912272,0.08212942741923297,0.11929063364046345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969906909549694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05511574413043453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17414251002883765,0.06855815903920573,0.0,0.08975248701438525,0.1943884295798911,0.08831292215696687,0.07116842136044357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994167903191133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108626325703966,0.0,0.0,0.13830214383505052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997847926632764,0.05715733337694503,0.11025454807383024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752348266814287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430596946519047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06828998376373081,0.06901148652964613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626339592852203,0.0,0.17535250346528392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055403236806726236
mentalhealth,theboyfrom99,2020/04/08,"A little rant cause I'm feeling it To share  a bit about me 
-Panic disorder
- Severe severe GAD
- moderate Depression
-DP/DR
-HPPD

What the hell kind of quality life is this? What a god damn waste of debilitated p.o.s. I've become. I used to be so hungry, now my stomach is full of hell. Cant afford therapy. Let alone right now in this crisis, once i start to get my anxiety calming down i get depreased, if its not one thing its always one of others. If not a couple",0.4241080196399381,2.8761228510638333,3.172553191489364,85.19576923076926,91.76595744680851,6.2965630114566284,18.9328968903437,7.61054688173877,1.0286654664484454,364,11,71,8,13,127,70,94,0.35100000000000003,0.575,0.07400000000000001,-0.9859,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,3,1,5,0,5,2,1,2,0,7,11,3,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,2,0,1,6,3,10,9,2,8,2,1,0,0,1,5,3,2,3,45,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19838303291533152,0.0,0.0,0.1593809288534459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465315335717395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21154659537329445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20911771987744648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19676965690066536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21194109141319664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16497757740400862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21952736371600906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685099509367276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20014889500921915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19946482260691675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.195867917655307,0.13529402082355085,0.0,0.19197858473526866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20398935859531825,0.2595919338072957,0.0,0.0,0.22473699058300212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16357853172509654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4327830501514318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557665979787975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2190485994136539,0.0,0.12725410216470745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654335300671155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JemmaW,2020/04/08,"No diagnosis I’ve suffered from depression and anxiety for five years now. However last year, a random doctor said that they think I have been misdiagnosed. I’ve been seeing a psychologist quite regularly now and they also agree that it’s not depression but I’m no closer to a proper diagnosis. I’m now on fluoxetine and reboxetine but nothing really helps and now I just don’t know what’s wrong with me. I’m getting sick of seeing the psychologist but not getting anywhere, not feeling better or even getting a proper diagnosis. It’s getting to the point where I just want to give up.",4.934504504504506,7.0147235315315335,6.760540540540543,68.55990990990992,70.44144144144144,9.97837837837838,31.25225225225225,10.25414643259724,3.7247009009009022,476,21,80,14,9,165,68,111,0.253,0.7190000000000001,0.027999999999999997,-0.9742,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,2,9,5,0,0,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,19,19,9,0,1,9,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,4,0,1,3,4,6,1,9,16,0,12,0,3,2,0,5,5,0,2,7,53,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638167023978345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15670799745573494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18117122208719413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3528702000163444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20967039160190606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353000322923704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357719681746244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42809805869556544,0.19650866459458627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13730515457842896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11257898728852887,0.16697828824039215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965569777737879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936473727228077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21788083820776472,0.0,0.0,0.1312307386955282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19485715646826984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32647433129193393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13125819143463952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082453303907748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22396889910340825,0.0,0.2638305191004464
mentalhealth,lilacc_Azalea,2020/04/08,"Advice when being on Fluoxetine? I just recently got diagnosed with Depression, Anxiety, and Ocd. I've been on fluoxetine for a week almost two now. I still feel like crap and sometimes wanna die but everything just feels kinds mellow, like I'm sad but in calm way? I don't really know how to describe it. I'm also having insomnia and really shaky hands, some of the side effects when taking Fluoxetine I think. Does this mean the medicine it's working or should I be concerned?",4.238666666666667,6.591248144444448,5.579722222222222,75.09625000000003,73.1111111111111,9.388888888888893,27.91666666666667,9.827888789773867,3.134666666666667,383,15,66,11,8,128,70,90,0.165,0.75,0.085,-0.7565,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,2,8,8,1,1,3,0,6,4,2,2,0,21,15,10,1,2,5,0,3,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,2,3,5,4,8,10,1,11,0,2,0,0,0,4,1,4,8,41,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118748530611909,0.0,0.0,0.21711479008782109,0.0,0.0,0.17339157818611475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658673785732042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1867475049250312,0.22006862761468585,0.22502584026137454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18974141188893195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19486462488786666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192623017970241,0.15489687890976225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734114634855375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22578557964235546,0.11915908445737712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21185545836052505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361814998845285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778020135417897,0.0,0.2140844600344118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2144413929133211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315343363395794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630223169265286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893006408733674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21180249297018586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17210232115713048,0.17392063028376506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578481818584447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,queenmingus,2020/04/08,"Help with potential trauma Please, if there’s a better subreddit to put this on, but I couldn’t find one. I’ve never considered myself to have significant childhood trauma, but when I was younger (5-8 y/o) , my father was convicted of possession and distribution of child pornography. I had to be removed from my house for over a week, and for the remainder of my childhood I was never allowed to have friends over unless my mum was present, which was almost never. I know he never touched me, but could there still be unresolved trauma there?",7.1324092409240905,7.590997504950494,7.2146039603960395,73.31946369636964,64.04950495049505,10.693729372937293,34.65511551155116,10.504223727775694,3.738642244224424,432,18,75,10,6,139,67,101,0.091,0.7929999999999999,0.11599999999999999,0.128,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,0,12,0,0,1,4,19,13,8,0,3,5,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,3,0,1,6,1,11,2,15,3,0,15,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,3,10,59,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272829911040217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007412208531413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18122131959723836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20745132558403634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17536056506068107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15213676897447698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618990388150789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12473969701343073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.700229420964346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15380434737301588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491507360760944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281728822241285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18126277947411587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18206590647095752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SerenityFate,2020/04/08,"This Morning's Words Apologies for the bad grammar and run on sentences. I have no excuse I just suck at English haha 

For a bit of background, I was married to an emotionally abusive and incredibly controlling man for 12 years. I've been divorced for a few years now, but I am still dealing with the PTSD from him and other things. I've also had PTSD most of my life and because of that, I struggle with depression and anxiety. When I am in a bad mental spot, it manifests as physical pain... headaches being the most common. The last week or so, I've been struggling with these headaches, on top of some gnarly cramps. Needless to say I've been a miserable kitty. 

Now that there's some background, I want to talk about the trigger I had this morning with my partner. He's very sweet and takes care of me really well, sometimes though, he reminds me of my exhusband. Not his doing, my ex just still has too much of a hold on my life. This morning the pain wasn't bad but I am severely fatigued right now. My partner asked me ""what is wrong with you today"" now my ex used to say this all the time to me. My brain instantly went to thinking I am burden. He didn't have a tone that indicated that it was a bad thing but the words them self just hit hard. Its extra difficult with those thoughts, since I've not been working our whole relationship and he's been taking care of me financially while we wait on SSI. 

However, this is where the happy part of my story comes in. I tend to dwell in things and was trying to get the courage up to ask him if I was being a burden. Logically, I know I am not, as he tells me all the time, but in those moments it can be hard to not think it. After his shower, my chicken ass asked him, guys, the look on his face made my heartache. He told me no and that he asked because he doesn't like seeing me in pain. Guys, I wanted to cry. I never thought I'd be in a happy and healthy relationship. We have our issues but we work through them. It's weird and sometimes it scares me but in a good way.

Anyway, I just needed to share how he handled my trigger and that I didn't have a breakdown over it. WOOO small wins! haha Anyway, stay safe loves",3.0051020408163285,4.4904254739229055,3.960281179138323,89.11130612244902,74.3061224489796,6.763356009070295,25.751927437641722,7.33818517376401,1.0943957369614503,1698,58,361,19,35,547,216,441,0.18600000000000005,0.6809999999999999,0.133,-0.9796,2,0,0,0,1,0,52.0,5,1,2,5,22,35,1,5,24,2,33,11,3,6,3,65,62,28,0,4,16,3,2,1,2,0,7,2,1,6,27,22,0,4,6,0,0,3,11,20,1,0,19,7,53,15,52,38,12,43,0,3,2,2,49,19,2,6,20,249,80,2,0.0,0.10223088988183404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900024363446068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600602896800277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226507069782441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881698002795694,0.10519426556278844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419836085449604,0.0,0.0,0.09632002806824988,0.0,0.0,0.17594192520580376,0.0,0.0,0.07432490564564716,0.0,0.0,0.09677338428049688,0.0,0.0,0.09477749390119836,0.0,0.08895367454629938,0.07431516266680292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705642362810632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04507914931301922,0.0,0.0,0.07236983470389018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17086687574644907,0.0,0.18369907612235672,0.1545847022442758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09005672135160492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047418715169620144,0.07033191610872372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188804470956788,0.042153368678828886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0724557367451039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787350501987841,0.08164277651587387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695266721041234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342771196313267,0.06397752841125984,0.06654653703087256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27543262702132737,0.0,0.0,0.09343575539436476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20171971689256252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527490670842235,0.0,0.0,0.18527065777495255,0.0,0.0736849539509116,0.0,0.1372309315873418,0.08638403435990086,0.0,0.06875614046006719,0.0,0.09001167315873307,0.09747489106558216,0.0,0.07137394066520422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17067159213984442,0.0,0.0,0.09196587741171128,0.13781095058794826,0.0,0.0,0.18040282304534933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974770405181674,0.0693507655450116,0.07541488244593259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17196717489485466,0.11057293982165432,0.08477231419892334,0.13699765109841133,0.10062427191644034,0.0,0.08178591037536967,0.08244681695688562,0.0,0.058580289230120625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07452054934334608,0.0,0.07119226336074001,0.1017835433711733,0.06848719075128157,0.06921077706414089,0.0,0.07757850900569417,0.07998492688603596,0.0,0.096331552683191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562966574764745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433658704194127,0.0,0.11112645920516144
mentalhealth,Jesus-H-Bassie,2020/04/08,"How do I deal with anxiety with trying new medication? Hey guys, this is my first post on Reddit, not really sure how to frame it. But I have major depression, panic disorder, obsessive-compulsive traits and PTSD. I have a lot of anxiety when it comes to experimenting with medications that my psych prescribed to me as I’m frankly terrified of serious adverse effects and that puts me off from trying other treatments. Even if my current one isn’t working. 

What are some ways I can try to curb this anxiety so I can just find something that’ll help me? I’m really at my wits end.",5.153716216216218,6.5926444054054105,6.405033783783788,73.85457770270273,68.9099099099099,10.595045045045048,31.893018018018022,10.686352973137794,3.7477828828828836,463,20,84,14,8,156,80,111,0.215,0.762,0.023,-0.9609,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,3,6,5,0,1,1,0,9,2,0,3,1,18,12,9,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,9,6,0,1,2,0,0,2,2,4,0,2,0,0,12,1,14,11,3,12,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,3,5,59,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3961034439276394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14867506072871642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779375681721847,0.14865557146117195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19780849142093734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15286768489790392,0.0,0.0,0.11399717866912952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16883074543931256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15774843880624026,0.14680897279163374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708958989416297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568659647357865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673385103211978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3477420263868858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1666930471454924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695464278861635,0.0,0.0,0.2025027054541319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652980233112837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20175398070577724,0.1735053552800541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211371824897868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287184054794396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16266847230486176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3515414375492325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13699764776872347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12565100501714335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,serayepa,2020/04/08,"Isolation during the pandemic I know that many of us tend to isolate when we’re feeling anxious/depressed, but for me one of the main things that helps me come out on the other side of a depressive episode is getting out more & being around more & more people until I’m feeling more comfortable & confident again. Right now I’m unable to do that due to this quarantine stuff & everything being closed. I’m doing a little better on new meds & with a new therapist, but I feel like not being able to socialize in person & be out in public & in different environments is keeping me from getting my anxiety under control. 

Is anyone else experiencing this? Any tips on how to deal?",9.513155216284988,7.844641244274813,9.499045801526721,65.84668575063614,60.22137404580153,12.702798982188295,39.39058524173028,11.538034831475384,4.626525699745547,557,23,94,13,6,184,87,131,0.061,0.7759999999999999,0.162,0.946,1,2,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,0,2,5,4,0,0,6,0,9,0,0,2,0,17,21,5,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,8,7,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,4,7,3,23,17,5,23,0,1,0,0,6,15,0,0,8,66,15,0,0.10353533410820323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7852634387474275,0.0,0.07040757757146637,0.0,0.079204247204104,0.1169654573810833,0.0,0.07239431292487962,0.10608418503357647,0.0,0.09216839812183024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156858930902388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918652268921166,0.0,0.0,0.11612368099050258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674038324429283,0.1783496631111684,0.0,0.0,0.1081723877705182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0864904862835054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305088229957087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15705172744146126,0.07396566337423832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818587761641936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06939755202155197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202696211661728,0.0,0.0,0.0569003119429627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05058213447353705,0.1037696044846338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496857827245283,0.0,0.0,0.11500441582391174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19999014170241114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015822190722591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177836435630852,0.09040306019927948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08841860962095104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10554123461124086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11852318694223245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021250288480315,0.06878427543826426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245402589627145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theantigamer88,2020/04/08,"Extra difficulties in a difficult time. So we’re all living in this difficult time. But for some it’s even more difficult. I hate feeling like I’m in a worse position than anyone else, but it’s getting hard now. I’m a 31 year old make.

I’ve always struggled with anxiety and panic attacks. I’m also a hypochondriac to an extent. I spent most of my life living at home, having weekly therapy sessions to overcome more social problems and depression and operate like a normal adult. And I got so far. Finally bought my own house with my life savings last year and began living alone. 

It was difficult, and I relied on trips to see my mother for support. Home being a place I truly felt safe probably because I spent 30 years living there. With therapy my social anxiety pretty much left me. And I could now go shopping and do normal things with my friends. But that anxiety seemed to evolve into health anxieties. 

I’d have panic attacks and for so long thought I had heart problems. I had chest pains and difficulty breathing and thought it was lung problems. I spent a lot of time visiting the doctor, getting tests. Only to be told there’s nothing. I’ve also always worried I have DVT due to leg aches. Pretty much most of it all in my head.

My therapist narrowed it down to me finding out my mother had breast cancer in my teens. Which after being given a low chance of survival she beat. I coped terribly with it at the time and it maybe has evolved into me having my own health anxieties. That and witnessing a horrific death of a child (no relation). Or even nearly losing my healthy sister when she was giving birth to my niece, who did die being premature. Just lots of random deaths and sudden illnesses. 

It’s odd, because my depression and the pain of anxiety I had through my life. Left me feeling like I just didn’t want to wake up in this world, to live this life anymore. Which also made me feel guilty. But I was scared of dying also. Not really death itself. But how it would happen. How it would effect the people I love. So was never really suicidal, though sometimes I longed to just not wake up. 

So now, I find myself in a situation. Where I’m isolating alone with a deadly virus spreading around. That seems to be killing more and more in my country. Most of my family being in the vulnerable category. I keep having panic attacks but I can’t seek comfort. I keep thinking I’m spending too much time sat down and I’ll get DVT and die. I’m sat here alone, waiting until someone in my family catches this shit. Or I catch it. If they do catch it, the possibility I’ll never see them again.

Constantly on edge, can’t sleep. I’m a fucking mess. My family call to see how I am. And I tell them I’m fine as cheerily as I can because I don’t want them worrying or risking anything for me. I can’t tell what pains are in my head or what’s real. And I can’t be wasting the time of the NHS. So I just struggle on and cry through it.

Everyday it seems to get worse, more pains. I had such a panic attack out of nowhere last night, I thought it was a heart attack. Honestly, I usually drink a lot and smoke a lot of weed to take my mind off shit. But that’s become counter productive now and adds to the problems and emotions so I’ve been pretty clean for awhile which also adds to the problems. Can’t fucking win.

I yearn for previous times when things were still shit but not like this. When my mum had cancer, at least I could be with her. At least I could be with the people that made me feel safe and keep me grounded and save me from my own thoughts and mental spirals.

Sorry, this is so many words but I just wanted to right them down. I feel like a scumbag feeling this way and knowing people are losing family right now. I’ve always felt at war with my own mind that seems to torment me relentlessly.

Tl;dr

It’s really difficult right now being isolated alone. With anxiety, hypochondria, depression, ptsd, alcohol problems. When I rely on the people I love and their company to keep my head above water.",2.950691459474648,5.084914346396968,4.253875368731567,84.1318848328417,76.20606826801517,7.276871751650512,25.398247647141446,8.212053250817874,1.7285655148194978,3172,114,604,57,72,1043,328,791,0.28600000000000003,0.603,0.11,-0.9995,1,4,3,0,0,1,89.0,0,0,6,6,43,62,13,8,31,0,50,37,16,7,4,138,114,67,10,18,22,4,9,5,1,2,15,0,3,2,39,46,3,7,21,2,6,6,13,45,0,0,34,12,84,17,88,65,26,92,0,7,3,5,27,44,5,18,46,408,123,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046308108195107514,0.0,0.1795131249850953,0.0,0.17326059764008572,0.1081656336017916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320389145638719,0.0,0.04297312341537421,0.030298335153666093,0.04439815867837623,0.035658065152593316,0.03857414904634078,0.0,0.246478718992002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924329115245048,0.0478561470925102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044246222787359034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04682586937165655,0.0,0.1037898347151602,0.0,0.047597528272929165,0.0,0.0,0.11196386116184562,0.0,0.1349135130183747,0.0,0.0,0.04435154269941802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04244829345244245,0.0,0.0,0.03619783979081896,0.04874201329404185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05723998618594797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339601895556774,0.0,0.13145800221686468,0.09286792159080266,0.0832099136084936,0.0474674506818046,0.07920826255123145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03347774626012702,0.0801183958980277,0.09055551041190373,0.04156744479745216,0.024626243570584943,0.0,0.03465609358361809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038317830063891584,0.0,0.03881643960381834,0.04278080460138983,0.13341160875040767,0.09211854268569966,0.0,0.10269587854357963,0.0,0.0,0.08692989108711181,0.0,0.0,0.049998638885478036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405982203470933,0.04793979422193625,0.0,0.02381381426169396,0.07064177849994685,0.0,0.0,0.09415942545293407,0.0,0.1224250487197648,0.10584771103893872,0.0,0.1913121809637131,0.07669388320133633,0.0,0.09695354657278507,0.0,0.1473552890368847,0.07821659350393285,0.0820024713366178,0.02892405816311588,0.04393125698150822,0.04353223378152333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04366787794862628,0.0,0.08750476008933672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556073459590313,0.0,0.06683972211998812,0.0,0.0,0.040663600687063636,0.08491117952888304,0.04157766447612941,0.0,0.04546903433567589,0.0,0.0,0.032955496175889554,0.18443073648688968,0.20336033221409044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016219795088345,0.0,0.04527210946037087,0.0,0.0,0.048849663423913364,0.0,0.13225089089213776,0.046718597717634563,0.2487738914388146,0.05065210912840781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04932064043561743,0.08327764830689585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11101438330783886,0.0,0.0,0.04338230890617669,0.0,0.10358859064886576,0.1577891830818069,0.0,0.0,0.13343723446674938,0.0,0.04870632964048725,0.04336271169293136,0.0883418481255901,0.036714570076678235,0.0,0.04285588064150832,0.04850597514759312,0.0,0.0,0.03460452659661521,0.0,0.0,0.0905988132516836,0.0,0.047397538603632106,0.04917197994191076,0.0,0.0,0.03257983387064378,0.0,0.07574713893916367,0.0,0.09910650630373144,0.05031111636965473,0.05757493776322289,0.02776502317558927,0.04257289843568938,0.13760122373100794,0.17686828914968736,0.0,0.0,0.041405027075407407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04772343539770076,0.0,0.07667397950580983,0.03439446290398696,0.03475785001802195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801031720204386,0.08831683422893319,0.061562792586809925,0.0,0.0,0.08371203805096554
mentalhealth,xPudimx21,2020/04/09,"How I developed a mental breakdown over a game (in case of typos I'm not native english speaker)  
First of all I feel kinda dumb for feeling what I'm feeling right now. This mental breakdown started yesterday but I feel like this is the accumulated of a lot of things I've been through lately. All this quarantine stuff is knocking me down I'm used to be a sports guy and now that I have to be isolated at home I don't have any way to burn my energy/adrenaline and that's really frustrating. But yesterday I couldnt hold it anymore. Basically me and 5 friends of mine that I talk and play video games with every single day really wanted to play a new game that to be able to play the game you need to get access by watching some livestreams of the game. I cant explain why but I'm wanting to play this game since it was announced and because I'm a person with a lot o luck all my friends got access and I didn´t. When I saw that all my friends were playing along and I simply couldnt I left the voice call and isolated myself from them. This had never happened before but I feel I can't talk to them I feel excluded. Since this happened I'm feeling like sh\*t and cant make up anything to spend the time alone.   


This is my first time in this sub I accept and accept any sugestion on how to get over it.",3.7535570338485615,4.710748468401491,4.846077088632363,85.53536881236552,71.75092936802973,7.893641166112308,27.54079436509489,8.20500826718156,1.6812334572490701,1034,36,216,15,19,340,137,269,0.065,0.759,0.17600000000000002,0.982,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,2,2,5,15,2,0,12,0,18,0,0,4,5,48,44,17,0,5,5,0,7,2,3,0,0,2,1,2,19,13,0,1,10,13,1,0,8,2,0,2,6,11,27,13,32,33,8,25,0,0,2,0,18,10,1,5,16,139,46,0,0.12211305247675328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647229499617066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16608212623837654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12110333530091033,0.0,0.0,0.10048863748198668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744389833774533,0.0,0.10390921360642127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12469107963651745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07875281668672654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288551340443196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.432208198932577,0.17447517817746827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20773860011048914,0.0,0.0,0.2830327242870476,0.0,0.1275980597774563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766496330529947,0.0,0.0,0.12091112053874725,0.21596833804128807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248934812389925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13774884206395838,0.0,0.13267618881396182,0.0,0.0,0.11931653854321858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076323008233099,0.0,0.0,0.08151141075162532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24612247120020825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09054528112264293,0.09418111410096704,0.11793754701664175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662440730269533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15645749660004435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428387960076416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20202635778047215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643224705547779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397902297940442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962996920411956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811264860302674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14241020581269967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546647013827934,0.0,0.0,0.14405088438176702,0.09692765716131467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018803638997138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatonemintycan42,2020/04/09,"I don’t know how to feel about this So I have a fear of disappointing people as well as a fear of failure, it doesn’t help that I have a sensory disorder marking me sensitive to light and sound, because if this I find it hard to talk to people, but now to get into what this is about. A few months ago I was in class, and I realized I forgot to do a thing that was worth a bit of my grade, sense I didn’t have anything to grade because if this I just blanked out, and about 15-20 minutes later a friend of mine looked at me and asked “why are you doing that?” I was forcing my blunt pencil quite hard into my palm. I asked a different friend I know about this and she said “your mental health may be a bit low”. So yea, that’s a thing. Not being able to be with friends is not helping me. I can call them and video chat but it’s just not the same you know.",1.95492664092664,2.9051413459459465,3.340868725868728,94.6462837837838,76.08108108108108,6.583011583011582,21.86293436293436,6.868970318607317,0.23794208494208435,659,16,161,6,14,216,103,185,0.10300000000000001,0.7929999999999999,0.10400000000000001,0.6297,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,1,1,11,8,0,2,11,1,19,2,1,1,0,29,29,15,0,2,9,0,3,0,3,1,1,2,0,0,15,10,0,1,6,2,1,0,6,4,1,0,6,7,25,4,24,19,4,10,0,2,1,0,16,6,0,3,4,116,40,4,0.14638363713823932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297602620397907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12046126067055395,0.0,0.27369788077154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17846821303134572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196260374506701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14947406018993795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15293974464049034,0.16776833024399174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3294445777082804,0.07401596527326032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337919923811632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3392869047980748,0.0,0.0764794086429144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2622619723985957,0.0,0.0,0.15559896107047455,0.0,0.0,0.1962357326782426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24134585612501555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292538753502695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475202764364471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168420225823816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20296796514568266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556970168145728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13924436043407354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1176576226180932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19450156805499336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316164697553633,0.0,0.13208846399900864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisisactuallyfun,2020/04/09,"Havent been diagnosed with anything but there is something wrong for sure Hi so I’m going to try to sum this up and not re explain the same idea in a thousand different ways. Im really young barely even a teenager and ever since i can remember something was always wrong like a void or emptiness. Ever since i was 7-8 I’m not sure. And meeting certain people and having them in my life would fill that void for a while, until they left my life or changed their position in my life. Ive always felt alone. When people broke my trust or family said things like “wish you weren’t my granddaughter” that made the void a little bigger and proved why i am in fact alone. Ive never had a traumatic event like a death abuse or something. But I’ve always been very mature and effortlessly smart in school. Ever since I’ve lost my best friend (like family) of 9 years i have not been able to push the thoughts away and the reactions got physical. Chest tightness shaking headaches numbness etc. My therapist literally either doesn’t care or doesn’t believe since she just sits there and occasionally says “why do you think that happens...”   this can’t be normal its been going on for too long and the reactions too strong. So help ? Most nights i cry sometimes i just sit there in like emotional /physical pain and it lasts like 30-45 mins and then im still sad its just not physical anymore i dont feel restless and “wrong”. Am i bipolar? Anxiety? I dont know so what do you know..?",2.5883295549457093,4.99378024913495,3.4446486099510807,88.11584775086506,78.68858131487889,6.7543729865171205,23.460326929960623,7.873277556716777,1.2668746211669246,1168,39,231,20,29,371,168,289,0.168,0.625,0.207,0.9244,2,2,3,0,1,0,27.0,0,3,3,3,18,25,0,2,12,0,26,8,1,1,9,53,44,26,1,3,15,0,3,6,1,1,7,2,0,0,10,13,0,1,10,0,0,5,12,10,0,1,14,5,25,15,18,28,5,36,0,3,0,0,14,12,0,6,22,138,35,1,0.08901086831696654,0.10546332379070596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18437683060607746,0.0,0.0,0.22219251885512464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06809307062901906,0.0,0.08827486343662465,0.0,0.0,0.07324836040736342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362864084239982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028476762023192,0.09341141476448384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907525125125467,0.0,0.09416169625940086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777425921780916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034415767766248,0.0,0.09299741239363576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20864014949825804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012524632124692,0.0,0.0,0.09927064713384423,0.05879083904186394,0.24154627908323775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678230497696449,0.0,0.04500656949840416,0.0,0.08546439235244432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876957606068276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117385544159482,0.0,0.07119012269064619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07871201688978663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059662108764284925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004824358897264,0.1922940242480296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978360907833896,0.0725557378006659,0.0,0.0,0.09671056886866987,0.0,0.18861302596915125,0.2609172848822656,0.08921227404774089,0.0,0.07877181745183894,0.0,0.0,0.09716587748820424,0.0,0.0,0.08422423579427206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0686506689920169,0.0,0.0,0.08353067015388882,0.08721175215382697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09471383962209093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341785715492105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05702264149739425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083196217135183,0.0,0.08466971905318123,0.07078501512030662,0.0,0.09008375080023168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2945228403389117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055747453239151,0.08803402476748941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108419441795544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16778337997676787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334847862807434,0.05913486575428166,0.05703457031617579,0.0,0.07066468683319807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060432536760371414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344328833374564,0.0,0.07065268415512177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16063692780229208,0.0,0.1023581057442097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06323076700579842,0.2919582340332031,0.0,0.057320080860174386
mentalhealth,Melancholyglow,2020/04/09,"Struggling between leaving home or staying to help and care for my parents.  I'm struggling between moving out and staying home. My parents are getting older and my dad has a mental illness which leaves a lot of stress on my mom. She does all the bills, cooking, cleaning, painting the house, she works a full-time job and I think there's a lot of stress on her. I help out as best as I can while trying to balance going to school full-time. I'm worried If I move out she'll be left to do all of this on her own and her health will suffer. 

​

She already has high blood pressure and I never want to get a call that she had a stroke. I've talked with her before about renovating the basement. It's big enough where I could live down there and it is my own studio apartment. All we have to do is install a bathroom and it's my own apartment. It even has a back door I can enter in and out of. That way I can be here to help her if she needs anything. But then there's a part of me that only wants to move out because that's what society expects of me. I'll be judged if I'm still living at home. But I'm also very family-oriented and love and care about my family. 

​

I'm the only child, my parents have no one else to lean on when they grow older. They say not to worry about them, but how can I not? I don't want them to go to a nursing home like my grandmother did and she got abused. Nor do I want them to suffer the same fate where my grandfather ended up not telling anyone he was sick and died alone in his home. 

​

Not to mention, if I stay at home the basement is basically a studio apartment. It's huge. The rent would be a lot cheaper than moving out. Plus, this house is already given to me.",2.2194166666666675,3.766697663888891,3.381111111111114,92.195,76.52777777777777,5.688888888888887,23.94444444444445,6.079149491110277,0.44009444444444457,1349,43,294,8,30,436,175,360,0.11599999999999999,0.8190000000000001,0.065,-0.9463,5,1,0,0,1,0,46.0,1,0,5,2,15,12,0,5,19,0,29,7,1,1,4,52,49,30,1,12,12,5,1,1,0,3,4,1,11,1,13,22,1,0,1,1,2,8,8,7,0,1,5,2,44,5,48,36,13,46,0,2,0,1,35,25,0,8,10,208,57,3,0.0,0.08337837587905804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288335002683509,0.15531275878874232,0.056275830682394834,0.0,0.2287415277476316,0.25652616557151725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04920518578055738,0.0,0.05790950926873852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054111116224646184,0.0,0.04289763604989503,0.0,0.059880716061326174,0.0,0.0738502426405993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185687270597436,0.0,0.14349627582867566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05618568449818885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303420511070033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061582319514034825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05878611556472217,0.0,0.06232800419106524,0.07271227065513525,0.0,0.04647952008041789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06633971328569317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07353210482807286,0.0,0.07998715994276465,0.0,0.05628228463912727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07480130481914615,0.0,0.0,0.1415050147715193,0.07435104631205343,0.4235283640963412,0.0,0.0,0.16239785471098828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983256681125748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490258997748093,0.07645852484804858,0.0,0.0,0.034379818294983364,0.0,0.12427813420981422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794812570402152,0.06351276390210613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07091762752663558,0.0,0.0,0.08241790986626611,0.0,0.299173835044178,0.0,0.0521793600530423,0.05427461488815327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04768535266797495,0.1070409514978834,0.0,0.0,0.23441670029280856,0.07620516208770095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0559620101583205,0.0,0.07121942078862327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22501903789776947,0.05619853867873864,0.0,0.16121996507211014,0.14713453445337926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05656171245106125,0.06150753869715935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04509102947826635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04777743185233542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05806361757227992,0.1660270500885489,0.055857390461547834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05123107851440652,0.1429307579630611,0.0,0.04998968806438479,0.0,0.25652616557151725,0.0
mentalhealth,OneAfternoon6,2020/04/09,"having troubles moving on No real specifics, but I can't move on from stuff that have happened recently. 

Thing is, I don't know what exactly happened and will never be able to know. Trying to actively tell myself nothing happened doesn't help at all. It does sound crazy on paper, but just doesn't seem that crazy to me. Actually - most of it (not all for sure, though), doesn't feel crazy at all. It feels real.

Trying to just disregard everything also feels wrong, every time I try to do that I just feel more guilt. Because if true,  it could have impacted other people greatly. Just putting myself into their shoes and I would not be able to move on from stuff like that easily. And it might have stayed with me forever.

So, trying to tell myself that there's just nothing to do. Nothing. Just stop obsessing. Do something else (working on it real hard). Accept that you've hurt people but can't help them. You might even harm them if you try. And it works, for a while. But then, panic attacks, sudden immense guilt and almost passing out multiple times throughout the day. Even if I'm not doing anything related to what happened or thinking about it at that moment. Even if I'm in the middle of talking with other people, eating, anything.

It's recent and I'm getting professional help. But. I don't know. Logically it'll get better. But it feels so real - and so wrong to move on. A bit rambely, I apologize.",2.77220634920635,5.3253834851851884,3.816640211640213,84.8741666666667,78.96296296296295,6.227513227513228,23.716931216931208,7.447530270364453,1.2750264550264547,1111,38,201,16,28,358,137,270,0.157,0.722,0.121,-0.9301,0,0,1,0,0,0,46.0,0,2,3,3,16,16,1,4,4,0,24,2,1,0,7,62,43,25,0,6,20,0,6,1,0,5,0,1,0,0,25,11,1,2,12,0,0,6,12,10,0,0,0,7,17,6,31,35,6,31,0,1,0,0,12,13,0,10,12,145,42,4,0.1632425196248685,0.0,0.07965057556865864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817319015356005,0.0,0.0,0.06527249198305471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433468448716693,0.0,0.0,0.092855966264293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04975556240051606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07218737142277458,0.08910927599422598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516793437787079,0.0,0.0,0.05263896022066926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142731449782477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351892555797086,0.06818408916198636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16173021695303394,0.0,0.06876943168804571,0.0,0.07335592535020137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20635080702810152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528747891746405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998772709156865,0.0,0.0,0.28870964197514226,0.0,0.07311661674266247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16412702984987687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737724676025918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13457072943768508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039876024695273016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731745163205198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3470019280509683,0.0,0.0,0.06295134735840756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23495340038274326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576496210703156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697577134367013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820519100547276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3716114513376407,0.0,0.0,0.16118229440525125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430492945310853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06283603345757552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699740290587221,0.0,0.06823902796127669,0.0,0.0,0.18687362953983427,0.0,0.0,0.0769270714252867,0.0,0.0,0.0656040768788636,0.1426811573574417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542255382176024,0.052299607565785215,0.08019247335194529,0.0,0.09518802595482906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770773882621785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884249849592952,0.0,0.0,0.057981401142404375,0.1784800689697445,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Calamity-Jay,2020/04/09,"A discord sever for people who need to talk! This server was created to be a safe place for people to talk/vent and make friends. I am not the one who created it but was asked to help advertise. We have a conglomeration of about a dozen support people who are completely willing to listen without judgment to whatever you need. We also have fun games every day if you want to partake!

[this is the link. enjoy and stay safe!](https://discord.gg/AHjDaXE)",4.356656626506023,7.062902903614463,4.8056475903614455,79.08750753012049,74.18072289156626,7.523493975903612,28.44728915662651,8.472884824447931,2.4717481927710847,363,15,60,7,8,115,59,83,0.02,0.7090000000000001,0.271,0.9695,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,2,2,0,0,2,5,0,0,6,0,9,0,0,1,0,14,16,5,0,4,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,6,4,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,2,1,5,5,12,12,0,3,0,0,0,0,13,1,0,1,1,46,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1750627181700612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20465184906569514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295235866178603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411792192684846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18444161196488465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691297772930427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673115272999138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461245173891895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3246388544600393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483394799104266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4552951150122834,0.0,0.2287149717643426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2473066540702629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333295598763382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2484171411066121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35190407697114073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911913660721375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21102199503366226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Landini0,2020/04/09,"I’m extremely scared of death and losing my parents I’m 16 and been going through an existential crisis recently and it’s causes a few panic attacks and caused me to just feel complete out of it all day. I’m starting therapy and desperately hope that helps, as this has caused pain in my body as well as my mind. Anyone have tips to help me get through this",4.544583333333332,5.582263180555557,5.431555555555558,81.76899999999998,69.97222222222221,8.537777777777778,29.677777777777766,8.841846274778883,2.2692077777777784,287,11,57,5,5,94,53,72,0.28600000000000003,0.601,0.113,-0.9506,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,7,1,2,2,0,3,2,1,3,1,14,11,8,1,1,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,1,5,2,11,10,2,6,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,1,3,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150258857086022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21395624156039467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089028511620361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5795976419277749,0.0,0.0,0.1971873245729948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128928857845933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509360548577786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982585674107569,0.0,0.10688424825601603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521180839380193,0.0,0.0,0.18679547913206032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21040169832407415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898966132241018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20011924035635967,0.22065907221594616,0.20882895710912647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18569597250688388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882904090409281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311658168746435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21507389856663456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16909709417609844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bripirate,2020/04/09,Dealing with rage Almost a week ago my younger brother committed suicide and I'm still struggling with anger and rage I feel that it's just consuming me inside I don't know how to get over it sometimes a fine sometimes I just want they hit something any tips?,4.4314705882352925,6.205067392156862,4.190343137254903,87.72904411764708,71.15686274509805,6.668627450980392,32.357843137254896,7.1686216300943375,1.9940549019607845,211,10,40,2,4,64,41,51,0.312,0.599,0.08900000000000001,-0.9432,0,0,1,0,0,1,1.0,0,0,1,0,4,5,3,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,12,7,3,1,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,6,1,4,6,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,3,22,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500410196713353,0.0,0.28245573068692753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19181956162266364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908052545988046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14262476923180853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14737169161288402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15502014512590198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21715385804399684,0.5579555432437789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22526415449747605,0.0,0.0,0.29488432689050964,0.0,0.3085424801000751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663741795658845,0.0,0.22626223984308594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,king_o_shit,2020/04/09,"I feel like just watching YouTube and Netflix and I don’t feel like doing anything else For a bit of background, I’ve always suffered from anxiety. I’ve been able to manage it decently, but lately it has gotten worse. I also live in a family that always puts extreme emphasis on work. If you work, are productive, and useful, you’ll enjoy everything that life has to offer. If you, for some reason, stop, you’ll turn into a lazy bastard who doesn’t deserve anything good. I think some of that has stuck with me. 

Anyways, back to the point. As I didn’t want to be useless in quarantine (I’m not going to school atm because I applied for uni abroad but Europe became a coronavirus hotspot so no travel for me), I started thinking about things to do. I started taking maths and physics lessons to be prepared for uni, and I started working out. The problem is that, as time has passed, I’ve lost the motivation to do anything. I can barely focus on my lessons and I can’t for god’s sake bring myself to work out. And if that wasn’t enough, I hurt my arm in some stupid way and I won’t be able to work out properly for a few weeks. All while feeling extremely guilty about my laziness and very worried about this coronavirus thing.

So instead, I’ve just been binging on Netflix shows and YouTube videos which makes me feel even worse because I’m not doing anything productive.

I don’t know if the quarantine is getting to me or what but I feel like shit. I don’t know how to feel motivated. Any thoughts?",3.699528248587569,5.490884538983053,4.32375,85.95624646892655,73.10169491525423,6.950564971751412,29.579802259887003,7.645422480735847,1.867929378531073,1189,51,229,15,24,378,158,295,0.18899999999999997,0.7140000000000001,0.098,-0.9863,0,2,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,4,0,10,13,13,3,0,9,0,27,3,2,6,1,53,54,25,0,6,12,0,6,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,13,15,0,1,16,5,1,5,11,8,0,0,8,7,28,5,38,40,7,26,0,4,1,0,6,11,2,8,12,151,41,10,0.2119765413863036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084758781780806,0.176381463520085,0.0,0.0,0.07207565856401102,0.0,0.081080736977607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3488772639781278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08149843789752201,0.0,0.12921893213396668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571174087548215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853960004628211,0.0,0.0,0.10951421607666342,0.0,0.07000425319363908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952554235358586,0.0,0.09991630889497198,0.0,0.32154512552200937,0.2271541252819365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055374496932621316,0.0,0.060235576735574774,0.08889793287797243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346263587857347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11649676348043357,0.0,0.11955938586599822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748626500361207,0.15534154615899048,0.0,0.09358958481718764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11569871769686366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074799370008876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019317424165064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101416461024729,0.0,0.10654748620341407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897359459411676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726578838518594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879543677414442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250571305457449,0.0,0.0,0.0886109401400778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796899891582136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082779502047205,0.13582600848274595,0.0,0.08414284792564128,0.061802612976271674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528480321605898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09153983590898412,0.0,0.08745142331151129,0.06251462811622516,0.08412855592830377,0.08501739763611174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3858036168941304,0.10763623368198634,0.21602220533521596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sassyfeet,2020/04/09,"How do I stop being so self conscious when I talk to my friends? CW self harm I've been really struggling recently and I don't know why. Nothing much has changed, although I made some new online friends about a month ago. I keep finding myself slipping, having trouble with what I should be doing when talking to people. It's kinda cyclical and it's exhausting. 

I generally have two trains of thought at the moment: the one where I remind myself that my friends care and want to help me and don't mind hearing about how much I'm struggling. And the much more prominent train of thought that tells me that if I keep talking about how sad I am. How bad I'm finding things, my feelings and being a downer that they're going to get sick of me. But they won't know how to tell me that without hurting my feelings so they'll just get resentment towards me. 

I keep finding myself wanting to pull away from them, distance myself and hope they don't chase me but getting sad when they don't seem to care. It's horrible. I'm stuck in two minds where I want them to leave me alone for their own good so they don't get dragged down, and desperately wanting to keep talking to them. 

The longer I talk the more I start questioning whether I know what the fuck I'm doing, and God do I know I'm being stupid. They don't deserve putting up with my sadness and weirdness all the time. They have their own shit to be dealing with. 

I started self harming again and I don't know why either (nothing serious just little things) but it's really bringing me down more. It just makes me feel shit but I feel like I deserve it. 

It all came to a head yesterday when my guy friend sent me a message intended for someone else. I'm trans FtM and the message just said 'you horrible woman' I don't know why but that shit hurt worse than anything at the time, we didn't figure out it was a misunderstanding for like 10 minutes. It's not even bad but I thought he saw me as a guy and fuck. It hurt so bad. How can I stop myself freaking out in the future? I know it was a mistake, and I'm not angry and I don't even have a reason to be sad..

I'm all over the place, I haven't felt so bad since highschool.

I don't want to lose my friends over this, what the fuck do I do? Have any of you had a similar situation?",2.4175000000000004,4.107308942675162,3.4328232484076437,91.42350238853504,76.34607218683652,6.153736730360935,26.00005307855627,6.853354925485097,0.9434190658174092,1796,67,388,17,40,576,198,471,0.251,0.649,0.1,-0.9981,0,1,0,0,0,0,40.0,1,2,12,1,27,41,8,2,21,0,39,9,4,10,3,92,94,40,0,9,16,0,5,2,5,3,2,2,0,6,23,22,0,6,23,0,0,6,16,30,0,3,15,8,66,11,44,70,13,41,0,8,1,3,42,17,6,6,20,258,89,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05947889539878669,0.0,0.0,0.06949395461040317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045629375756795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055216463117443104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06304138054361237,0.0,0.2240982450150528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674296828361224,0.13682306967953886,0.0,0.07098146360775635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06917575101251568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0560523033761833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863603710840966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357083528385137,0.0479352814514598,0.06442521637261164,0.0,0.1839808226711402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592012120844118,0.18609483295858603,0.14022507893635586,0.0,0.03813370310524215,0.056279155322442966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13287640463655856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06886256206444683,0.0,0.07562504327454711,0.0,0.04497480366483192,0.0,0.0,0.06664408889850157,0.0,0.0,0.21549144399125655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23856141506434805,0.0,0.0,0.2581296023403515,0.0,0.0,0.07104777093061679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06556201193347454,0.06725046420404407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506621441085327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06349035505321357,0.04478886288237982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13550099640563848,0.0,0.05355749387458124,0.0,0.14797566145864502,0.0,0.0,0.06480428412787914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287659084827635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04546777463809205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046517748108826605,0.0,0.0701037970391844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745266544598821,0.07516583246264863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597021321950392,0.06898857664807276,0.06625181164632597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382617157932005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06108408133394212,0.20999554394150088,0.0,0.2066273675786087,0.05550468795607092,0.07542168209831764,0.0,0.0,0.056852459488095586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498552475750348,0.0,0.0,0.1121949341669524,0.0,0.14029213332209875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696567238137018,0.11729433679555633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891547091489027,0.0,0.0,0.15980647426909678,0.07825151254751546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109124191664812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19788258015556007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18163825681488524,0.0,0.0,0.06468069403819407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837924602727036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pire4life,2020/04/09,"Is there a term for this kind of behavior? Hi! Is there a psychological term for a phenomenon when someone is a completely different person with different people or friend groups? To the point where they are very uncomfortable when they meet those people at the same time and then don't know who to be. They don't reveal their true selves to others or even don't know who they really are.

I would love to read more about it.  Thank you!",4.082857142857144,6.09297204761905,4.542380952380952,83.86928571428571,72.57142857142857,8.609523809523811,21.523809523809533,9.23628265651192,1.4844952380952383,348,8,70,8,7,110,58,84,0.06,0.8109999999999999,0.13,0.799,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,5,0,7,5,0,0,6,0,10,1,0,0,1,10,14,6,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,7,5,10,12,4,9,0,0,0,1,14,3,0,2,6,51,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493108310392453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4968650108855409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15705335303772847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837104671974912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476142838359082,0.2613585102041739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21460833748414404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296974257691632,0.20762284357304076,0.0,0.0,0.22478168465876044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23784723254533666,0.0,0.15232980498640206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20147266692725085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189185334800333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13865311251257598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19619578286198489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689141392647348,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Axel_Wrighty,2020/04/09,"Social isolation sending me back into depression Managed to crawl out of depression by spending all my free time I possibly could with friends and people I love, now I’m stuck at home with my controlling mother, won’t even let me out the house for exercise, even though she still goes out for shopping, and my dad still works so we aren’t in complete quarantine anyway, I’m limited to the small back garden and my room and it’s driving me crazy. I was doing so fucking well, and now it’s like I’m back to square one.

The phone and video calls ain’t the same, and I’m running out of things to do rapidly, what do I do to keep my head above water?",7.83909090909091,5.661014424242428,7.740000000000002,78.75500000000002,63.84848484848485,11.224242424242425,35.63636363636364,9.725611199111238,3.094081818181818,512,18,107,8,6,165,84,132,0.11699999999999999,0.77,0.113,0.0954,1,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,1,0,0,3,14,8,1,0,4,0,10,5,1,1,1,21,18,10,0,1,0,2,0,1,1,1,1,0,3,0,4,15,1,3,0,4,3,3,3,3,1,1,2,1,14,6,19,13,2,20,0,2,1,2,10,9,1,0,9,75,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4164135462911543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18432549709171756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892660289429004,0.0,0.20246237204042475,0.14412614736162888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3109537653138213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2384562623108752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13946506237525147,0.16688275540566708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18525996534518668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181070771439258,0.0,0.0,0.20828950780196312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16044959032368686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18458831635630302,0.0,0.08819027127823853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16292139272227546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232130349568568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12514603209959102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20350298683458234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18401180986688184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2883182411840575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11992581913978335,0.0,0.17735458921559252,0.0,0.10525946224012024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16230422310256787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13141671294759338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,THRoWaWAYy_SaDXx,2020/04/09,"No one to talk to idk Obsessing super hard over books, been very anxious and “depressed” I guess lately. Pretty much stopped eating all together. Cool",4.641794871794873,7.923052923076928,4.128461538461536,80.89987179487181,77.46153846153845,6.5435897435897425,27.89743589743589,7.793537801064563,2.2929128205128206,120,5,18,2,3,36,25,26,0.38299999999999995,0.379,0.23800000000000002,-0.4131,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,0,4,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,4,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,2,1,2,3,1,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,10,1,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35007393927011066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668974692648084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170825574245552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413655554275889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27758982376877384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34955588386792164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277959866698843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20998135402684545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3152573314357643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590718852951326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24906820023431106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556818049017491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CaptainYee,2020/04/09,"Is it safe (mentally) to go on and off SSRI's? So I'm 24 years old and I was first prescribed Zoloft at the ripe age of 19. Since then, I have been on and off anti-depressants like crazy. I have probably tried more than 6 different anti-deps for no more than 3-4 months at a time.

The past two years or so, I would start taking Zoloft or another SSRI because I would feel like that is my only option, go a few months with it, then quit taking it (I would do this because every time I'm on one of these meds, I begin to feel like I'm too forgetful and less intelligent than when I am not on it).

I have been feeling very disassociated lately and I was considering starting up on Zoloft for the 4th time now, but I am concerned about the safety in doing this so frequently.",5.121388888888891,4.584352750000001,6.3883333333333345,80.92555555555558,68.375,9.611111111111112,27.777777777777786,9.150863307647796,1.9265069444444447,600,16,131,10,9,204,95,160,0.033,0.873,0.094,0.7994,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,7,4,0,0,6,0,16,3,0,0,0,19,29,14,0,3,4,0,3,3,0,3,3,0,0,0,8,6,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,3,4,3,12,4,22,22,4,33,0,0,0,0,0,11,0,3,23,89,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16305667404030513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18958430134051496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339330439526963,0.0,0.0,0.16246576430824422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13101655404087234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358783924492528,0.22218032309973787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322693284367605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17674994743676753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17541224233773198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22791024512704675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17272689177660233,0.0,0.15670873858557272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24823931211327666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16317245879982167,0.0,0.10537170695395713,0.11826574767981785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14844358853962694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676567046704325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539477620257662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12863228430313522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22012924448759635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23383525415192366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720221799227703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055751769984915,0.0,0.15190217728292793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128304859945429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3313909911571873,0.0,0.0,0.20027548095082034
mentalhealth,avatarkate,2020/04/09,"I am having depression because of my bestfriend. What should I do? My bestfriend in college are now in one of the best state of her life and I am on the opposite side. I am very happy for her and so glad because in college, she’s always on her toes due to haters. She finally found her cliques and posting her “besties” on her IG wall. It makes me so depressed because I think she already forgotten about me and my birthday is coming up and I don’t know if she will even greet me or even remember my birthday. It makes me so sad because I hate losing people especially friends. We don’t even talk to anymore. I really wanna talk to her but when I do, it feels so awkward and distant... I dont know if its just because she’s more of a face-to-face person or its just bc she didn’t want me in her life anymore. I don’t know what to do. I need your help. Any advice will do...",0.8102157031924051,2.879528278688525,2.67451251078516,93.04255392579807,83.15300546448087,5.382686223756112,24.38567730802416,6.5966054737557815,0.7267114754098363,677,27,149,7,19,225,95,183,0.1,0.81,0.091,-0.1522,0,0,0,0,0,1,21.0,1,1,0,2,12,11,2,1,3,0,18,3,1,2,0,28,30,16,0,6,7,0,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,1,7,8,0,0,7,0,0,1,5,7,0,1,2,1,37,4,19,25,2,17,0,4,0,0,21,10,0,4,4,109,44,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13944454560818725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15747272421995795,0.0,0.11873762467589165,0.0,0.0,0.09704072439411103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28303961781596537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4349422200761841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14975458531051503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292320040649095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458141737114304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16724304597041145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827555200711626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07215328199958915,0.0,0.0,0.1563206026452053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15646291201592116,0.11024947401677833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15190653894895426,0.0,0.14088646137256144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564863544003832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23527215448896696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015861092165008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964452073110105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19050638439853754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10581005758558723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669704470615262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893004010669801,0.1245999188124006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666691606983924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09141711483850927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616510007806621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293933097493891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09143623878941376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774223970368998,0.08416801065007637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justhelp17,2020/04/09,"How do I get out of my state of numbness? Is it hormones related? I’m scared to go back on meds I’ve been off testosterone since March 14th I originally went off because my lower voice had started to freak me out a little and make me uncomfortable I went on because I hated/hate having a uterus. I am in talks of hysterectomy right now which is so exciting! But I am feeling so weird and down reminiscing recently I’m back home and I’ll drive by old places that I used to be so excited to go to as a child and I feel emotional and numb. I couldn’t cry when I got sent home from college. My ex of two years had broken up with me and college was ending early. It was very emotional but I could barely cry. I had to literally force myself. Not crying felt gross I needed a release. I’ve started missing my ex after not doing so for forever, I feel numb, I don’t experience much emotion or joy or anything. I can’t feel anything, my sex drive is down, I’m numb, my emotions are in a weird state. Is it because of hormones? Is it not being on testosterone for a while? If I take a shot of it will it change? I just don’t know",0.6465073649754522,2.843792578723402,2.998829787234044,89.66096153846155,84.91489361702128,5.828150572831425,22.655482815057287,7.1686216300943375,0.8428690671031096,876,32,189,13,26,300,127,235,0.145,0.767,0.08800000000000001,-0.8808,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,10,13,0,1,7,0,25,5,0,4,0,31,48,19,0,4,9,2,5,0,0,1,4,1,2,1,8,9,0,0,6,0,0,7,7,10,0,1,11,6,28,3,31,32,1,39,0,1,0,1,5,15,0,3,15,126,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19214283319146927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795398253213843,0.0,0.21350051395512945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235010244377912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09321160497307034,0.0,0.3847176184182224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5252908978485245,0.10340166462873156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114199283717771,0.0,0.0,0.23611968179380066,0.0,0.11209377515250978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060994589362826625,0.0,0.13269806396579736,0.0,0.09337186384075014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342100656755455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641601517322445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11700943881648672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779283797238189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967768571351215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858212123425674,0.08656514449278566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250453077515867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219739677271489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11527187794260635,0.0,0.0,0.0996998296761698,0.0,0.0,0.11688238983171632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09657290051885653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16526581755396486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777792005853714,0.09383543236460286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404317302467708,0.0,0.0,0.10083043658893802,0.0,0.09632708104907477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21644808497841295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518013150046463
mentalhealth,RIPingossipsea,2020/04/09,"please help, who can i call to check up on my bf whos being isolated by his abusive parents  hes 17, lives in america, florida",2.415555555555557,3.3492270370370387,5.408333333333335,80.33250000000002,74.92592592592592,9.844444444444443,32.01851851851852,10.125756701596842,3.3907185185185185,98,5,21,3,2,36,25,27,0.20600000000000002,0.635,0.159,-0.3612,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,5,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,0,12,5,0,0.0,0.4792004546922562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129829312508252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710905423811771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3571317970263217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4490876208747171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4439584765262702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LestaDE,2020/04/09,"Overinterpreting others reactions to your actions. Rejection sensitive dysphoria coping tactics? How can I cope with those feelings? I got diagnosed with ADHD last Year and have gotten medication for it. While they really helped my inattentiveness, they didn't change that over-(miss?)-interpretation problem that I have since Years already.

Help and coping tactics much appreciated.",10.319166666666668,14.838273535714285,8.700000000000003,49.311666666666696,63.64285714285714,11.590476190476188,37.904761904761905,10.864195022040775,6.206783333333335,322,16,34,11,6,98,47,56,0.111,0.79,0.099,-0.1877,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,1,0,7,7,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,1,7,0,4,4,1,5,0,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,25,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3283999891896252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015442206129381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2890680688163297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773485634410772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13816618270247802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185473722594301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3663147807892177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22273968971208424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27527615136513045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008742213133484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614685934404996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17505445962919344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22603975942757495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3519351442650382
mentalhealth,bootyman408,2020/04/09,"intrusive thoughts of hurting other ppl just here to say I’ve officially been cured, I used to suffer bad from intrusive thoughts of hurting my mom, my nephews, my sisters, anyone tbh. it would be so bad to the point where I’d go to the kitchen in the middle of the night when everyone was sleeping and grab a knife, fork, you name it. and I’d hold it and I’d get these thoughts in my head or voices to go hurt one of my family members that were sleeping.. I’d cry myself to sleep Bc the thoughts wouldn’t go away, these lasted for 5-7 months.. I’d even have thoughts of killing myself, I’d put a knife to my neck or stomach and hold it there and thinking to myself “I should just kill myself so I don’t hurt no one else” but never went through with it.. I finally ended up crying to my mom and told her the thoughts I was having, she said everything was gonna be ok and called an therapist. ended up at therapy and that helped a bit, there was some stuff I never told the therapist Bc they would’ve sent me to the mental hospital, and I didn’t want that. I. Knew I was gonna get through this myself, not saying therapy didn’t help, but I stayed strong and beat this intrusive thought. now I’m better and still get thoughts but I’m like “I wouldn’t do that” so why worry? for anyone suffering from this OCD pls PM me for tips on how to deal with it.",3.664950365236937,4.2951544911032045,4.4974676905787625,89.15962727102455,71.70462633451956,7.90867203596179,26.889117812324404,8.032893268588372,1.384846263345196,1056,34,236,14,19,341,144,281,0.128,0.799,0.073,-0.9177,0,0,0,0,0,2,28.0,0,1,1,3,14,14,2,0,12,1,19,7,6,2,2,44,46,21,2,5,8,4,1,1,0,6,0,4,1,0,17,13,1,2,10,0,0,6,9,10,0,2,23,5,29,4,32,15,2,28,0,6,0,0,19,10,0,3,12,146,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594441670772522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789614831406777,0.0,0.1384518389356847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07332666232498587,0.09051563538149723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465980831259734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18214425394480704,0.0,0.08547599234252387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926019861058871,0.0,0.14686631044781415,0.0,0.0,0.0547609033386522,0.0,0.0,0.07922352315197755,0.07451365885299531,0.0,0.07815964150374857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908232391976596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299502816878548,0.0,0.14135803660560306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508900505673275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11114490026905993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35502508218799633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18345402313229792,0.0,0.0,0.06758225956832492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040505364581963285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835532152499307,0.0,0.0,0.19420506871635368,0.06617752419457244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788974303049702,0.0,0.0,0.07780489322244111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236316483485688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07837621972286556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334688717873075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0788658637356827,0.13186582923465112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24890794932805915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837043184006334,0.06621158607135612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949114731610022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896283410795963,0.19252850071824085,0.0,0.05312502156707854,0.0,0.5265666757874804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584470463039551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07160713638329977,0.0,0.0,0.04890213596101126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685788173336977,0.07481287407495107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08419856108016327,0.0,0.11779297511191253,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spacepiess,2020/04/09,"Anyone else wake up with anxiety? I’m a 20F and sometimes when waking up from naps, I get really anxious and like for me it’s one of the worst anxiety attacks. Are there ways to prevent this from happening?",4.243333333333332,5.553677073170731,5.569268292682928,79.47552845528456,70.95121951219512,9.369105691056909,30.739837398373986,9.725611199111238,3.0398227642276416,164,7,31,4,3,55,36,41,0.278,0.639,0.08199999999999999,-0.8477,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,4,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,8,4,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,21,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4630102395526061,0.3418768964613641,0.0,0.2116004466478789,0.3100721593790627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34427638854337445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528019783456273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810758538713734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26760777168034944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14784589858750027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2050646037209378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19386750116963586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29930104869587465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402073802334621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anony-mous99,2020/04/09,Lamictal 150mg.. what was your weaning doses? What was your medication wean if you were changing meds or looking to become pregnant ?,4.3150724637681135,7.694075000000005,4.843478260869572,73.99246376811597,81.6086956521739,6.544927536231885,33.7536231884058,7.793537801064563,3.3403449275362327,107,6,15,2,3,34,20,23,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,0,11,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4800620293769719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4598262560810361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3650157318194715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4828235635319239,0.4378871820361847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,loganwadams,2020/04/09,"Switching meds a lot in a short time Less than 2 weeks into being prescribed

Last Wednesday I was prescribed Buspar, Prozac, and Ativan when needed. I did not really like the effects at all of Prozac because I felt severe dissociation and the numb/dullness. I met with a new psychiatrist on Monday and they switched me over to Cymbalta and Clonidine, and only take Ativan when desperately needed. I have also felt very dissociated and out of my body on Cymbalta and a little nauseous, but my anxiety doesn’t seem AS bad as it was when I was taking Prozac and Buspar. I don’t feel as numb, either, but I still feel crazy. This is my 3rd day on Cymbalta, and feeling a little more disconnected than the previous two days. I also have not hardly slept at all since starting Monday night. Only gotten maybe 2-3 hours of sleep a night. I feel like I am going crazy. 

A little backstory... I had never suffered from severe anxiety or depression until 3 weeks ago. So this is not something that I have been dealing with for long. The depression has been set in by the anxiety. But it has felt like an eternity for me since this is so polar opposite to who I am as a person. Does anyone have any insight? How to cope?",4.761374239350914,6.209515370689656,5.957352941176469,76.65823529411767,69.86206896551724,8.562271805273834,27.87119675456389,9.007467420416297,2.356831338742393,954,33,170,18,17,319,130,232,0.191,0.787,0.022000000000000002,-0.99,0,0,1,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,1,9,8,0,0,14,0,21,7,3,2,3,38,38,26,0,2,8,0,8,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,7,13,0,0,10,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,13,8,20,3,29,24,6,39,0,3,0,0,5,14,0,3,26,124,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004532682820852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1812474005044596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07706296315205112,0.0,0.26007345491670897,0.0,0.0,0.07923749774923361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461928040656238,0.06908014442034885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258753867787231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14616685245801242,0.11683018368926733,0.19520844191189315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916899665104048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2291963810761217,0.08095738253940372,0.3264211701151412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440360203290556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151440764456184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115995127097186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237269533956728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16609046779643796,0.34073576236528824,0.0,0.10028655645144503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963424584567068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11384735361821327,0.0,0.1258753867787231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805390973213613,0.08740104537395875,0.1094472601698503,0.0,0.2126903641124366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17237323706520272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894854981906233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259708536032312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316424958571728,0.0,0.25604359766736684,0.0,0.18748254394375832,0.0,0.11340401222519199,0.0,0.0,0.08724094466282563,0.0,0.0,0.08021001682535267,0.0,0.09049923318908214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040834091395118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06607906998534202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069929598888796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350266021175817,0.0,0.0,0.18180042227422288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway12334315283,2020/04/09,Is there something wrong with me? I’m a weird person to say the least I can cut off people like it’s nothing and one moment I’m happy next I want to be a girl and then want to be the punisher and at school I’ll walk through the halls and think I want to fight them I love getting into fights love it. I also will change mindsets like a create a class from cod I just change it subconsciously and go on in life I don’t know what to do but yeah.,-0.621360544217687,1.4557346530612243,1.321530612244899,100.13358843537416,90.22448979591834,4.082993197278912,15.309523809523812,5.46131890053228,-1.0244312925170074,348,7,85,2,12,114,66,98,0.111,0.6920000000000001,0.198,0.743,0,0,1,0,2,0,3.0,0,0,1,0,3,11,4,0,7,1,7,3,0,0,0,14,18,8,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,2,4,7,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,6,0,1,0,1,9,5,13,15,1,11,0,0,0,2,8,6,0,0,5,52,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16822074785038849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4450552115732316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990175991361473,0.0,0.119549544634353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22392671632028094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560555887594312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485798959181122,0.20553757001589076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3797070434004222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237148362981216,0.0,0.0,0.2018412122349978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14254193301185228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458336104541936,0.1836737961807572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16728266976943534,0.0,0.2128904021719165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1619414889649001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13478693442993148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37221833321636205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22999007519334355,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nosebleed420,2020/04/09,"im obsessed with my best friend to the point of wanting to kill myself over it ive known her since november 2016 and have had other relationships like this one but it never went this far. 
as a kid i was always obsessed with being someones favourite and i still am to this day. my best friend is the most important person in the world to me and it feels like my life revolves around her. when shes gone my sense of purpose leaves with her and it makes me suicidal. 
i get insanely jealous and constantly feel threatened that someone might take my spot as her best friend and i dont know what to do with myself. 
it feels like were growing apart and i dont know  if life is worth living anymore",3.558757357750167,5.165655143884893,3.8547285807717486,89.93283191628521,73.10071942446044,6.781164159581425,25.586003924133426,7.348242739294969,1.0707496402877696,551,18,114,6,11,171,87,139,0.12,0.644,0.235,0.9622,0,0,0,0,0,2,5.0,0,0,0,3,3,13,2,2,4,0,14,2,0,1,1,25,25,12,2,2,2,0,3,3,3,1,2,0,0,2,11,12,0,0,6,0,1,3,3,4,0,1,5,3,20,9,16,18,4,15,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,3,8,80,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573901063084925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13794585088244915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238249256594689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379179957974504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15031335589334024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970540968377748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260389405353364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109933433954742,0.1987404133152464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223956622032104,0.0,0.07267191643902854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15024754364841775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15388910973849745,0.0,0.1528870424117562,0.0,0.0,0.14728257488355398,0.0,0.0,0.19649522972457864,0.2038658315164806,0.0,0.12282431198740774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284765679510767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14755886959201725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10727940637996014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425504607967317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214532576965002,0.0,0.0,0.13149067512270007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493370434625383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150616444851121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357111704474685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110822413259034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214844239300976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045828775687018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204242173445238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12894338095606145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tmn1202,2020/04/09,"Life Just Sucks   

Hi, my name is Mike, I have Borderline Personality Disorder and I hope you’re all ready for a long ass story coming from a 23-year-old because I got some issues, haha. 

To make it easier, I’m gonna split it part by part, thank you for coming to my TedTalk and excuse my shitty writing – I’m very overwhelmed and stressed.

**Part One**

“No one will ever like you. You’re fucking annoying”

I’ve been severely bullied, and why do you ask? I have no fucking clue and wish I could tell you. Always picked last, pushed to walls, nearly failing some classes, I even received comments from my peers such as “if you died, no one would really care.” I honestly believe them from time to time. This led me to practice self harm since the age of thirteen and I can honestly say that this was the start of my decline.",1.3511249999999997,3.9466918625000034,2.575000000000003,90.85000000000002,86.625,5.45,23.0,6.961326702584282,0.900975,638,24,127,9,20,204,109,160,0.22,0.612,0.168,-0.9011,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,5,1,1,5,15,4,2,4,1,10,4,1,3,2,23,26,8,1,5,2,0,0,1,0,3,1,1,0,2,5,8,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,8,0,3,3,1,20,7,15,19,6,14,0,2,0,3,17,2,4,4,8,77,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835538067764595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297554288819585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670840800531733,0.0,0.0,0.16025618561353366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502353483213454,0.0,0.0,0.2450549641352012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356735951278403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762304495560036,0.0,0.16301978466733313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939484214546614,0.12866455612218808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629978560668188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376261606314768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127677986416434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14846198881278913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11594488435514515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10046857834982753,0.06949145888605172,0.0,0.0,0.1258782494913069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494655004492808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925733863832524,0.0,0.28915726336549524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.462097371430416,0.0,0.0,0.12419880272743646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911228219083674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311524961332317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14838772512424034,0.1606911285433822,0.0,0.11766270214514515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067846446130703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16293586077582642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432435098644995,0.13095582010705498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658830047035394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173632000809117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283498078978367,0.0,0.16356940323491814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104347623499932,0.0,0.0,0.09159813335258364
mentalhealth,covaddi,2020/04/09,"I feel like I'm not real I feel like I should put a trigger warning here...
TW: self harm, suicidal thoughts, eating disorder

I've done so many bad things. I've starved myself while my dad was in hospital. I cut myself. I ate a tube toothpaste in an attempt to avoid school. I wanted to break my own bones to avoid class. I tried to kill myself around Christmas time.

All of those things happened and yet I still feel like I have no right to say I'm depressed, or at least need help.

I've been struggling since I started 7th grade, now I'm  about to start 9th grade. A big part of me feels like I'm just being a teenager and it just really brings me down.

Ever since this pandemic started, things have been getting worse. I have online classes but not school since it's school break where I live. My tutor is always talking about getting into these 'gifted programs' and  getting into  'prestigious schools' and yes that is important but now that I'm at home all the time and I spend almost every waking moment in my own mind,   and it becomes my own personal hell.

I haven't cut since New Years but I still feel the urge to and it's getting worse everyday. I've been having bad thoughts again, things like 'I don't want to be around to fail that test' , 'I won't have to be a failure if I'm already dead' 

Despite all this, I still feel this strange feeling. Like K can't be depressed, I don't get to.

I don't know what the point of this post is but honestly just don't know what to do.

I don't want to worry anyone so I'll end this post by saying, It's highly unlikely that I'll try to kill myself within this month since I threw away the rope and haven't been able to go near things with blades ever since New Years.",3.085535563973064,4.39676144034091,3.7080808080808123,91.69786195286196,73.80113636363636,6.464814814814815,24.116582491582488,6.775458762138228,0.643173274410775,1345,39,291,11,27,424,172,352,0.21,0.7090000000000001,0.08,-0.9937,0,2,0,0,0,3,32.0,0,0,0,2,20,21,5,3,10,1,29,4,2,1,5,51,63,17,4,6,11,1,7,6,0,2,0,2,1,2,24,13,2,2,11,0,1,4,12,14,0,0,10,9,33,7,35,47,8,49,1,3,0,0,7,18,1,3,29,173,57,12,0.07530589776632364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540797869857824,0.0,0.08310193078491222,0.0,0.06266053957127299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052655634667549515,0.0,0.0,0.13407642957899982,0.0,0.0,0.07075236987002784,0.0,0.12575455821085826,0.0,0.08316944759899858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972171879864322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630708303722386,0.0,0.0,0.07706407906420494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705673355293648,0.0,0.0,0.0666986734463062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623699174730233,0.06344846678486595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665384721979631,0.2689927420554573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19672111723297608,0.0,0.04279807712569676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659275669321339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05047595589256957,0.07956481557081098,0.07553795552721929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16662963676288572,0.0,0.08277230398601039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22074394680481246,0.0,0.06649648739566792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07634836060702267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603748944565622,0.0,0.06010844913690699,0.0,0.0,0.05583836899616313,0.0,0.1454618106469325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815489487747631,0.0,0.0,0.06575420524566933,0.0,0.0,0.07118841440643213,0.0,0.14424446717463696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570322688368487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571459821722922,0.04824288642682503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431082522800552,0.0,0.11977254492239167,0.0,0.3048543557180934,0.0,0.0,0.0785604749763167,0.0,0.0,0.3737629009318692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599057061089976,0.0,0.1804181616983395,0.0,0.0,0.07872607500872801,0.0,0.0823724295145617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06052802808786245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501494614713456,0.0,0.0,0.11956894215210695,0.08782294916306238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10225552274875767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13325210883333258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647679461696805,0.1534862867734349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09698905832134012
mentalhealth,givenobucks,2020/04/09,"Low self confidence, short temperedness and fear - I am 27 and about a week ago, when I sat down to have my breakfast I felt this weird fear like something was gonna go wrong. Like a weight on my chest that I didn’t know how to lift. I didn’t know what to do so I distracted myself with a tv shown till that feeling left after a while. 

- I’ve also been dealing with low self confidence despite having proven to my own self repeated with examples that if I’m able to put my mind to something there’s no reason why I should not be able to achieve what I want and yet my brain seems to be wired in such a way that it completely fails to look at a sound history of example and completely makes feel like I’m the pathetic undeserving piece of crap. This situation also intensifies at work and I get an inferiority complex.

- In addition, my answer to almost everything seems to be being short tempered, I’m afraid I will damage my relationships at this rate. 

- I have had rough relationships in the past with my partners and have seen a therapist previously, which was also the first time I saw one. She wasn’t very helpful. I received some sort of judgement from her and I haven’t seen another one since then. 

What can I do to remedy this situation? And how do I choose a therapist that best works for me? Are there any books or podcasts that I can read or tune into that can help?

Thanks.

Love and prayers for you all. Stay safe.",4.107583586626141,5.494441379432626,5.003880445795343,83.10500000000002,71.37588652482269,8.917527862208713,27.258358662613983,9.362217197678863,2.189193313069909,1127,39,232,25,21,367,166,282,0.132,0.743,0.125,-0.2804,0,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,0,6,12,20,2,4,12,0,26,6,3,4,1,41,48,22,0,3,4,0,5,3,1,3,0,1,0,4,16,15,2,1,11,3,0,3,6,13,0,3,12,10,30,7,34,29,5,31,0,5,4,1,14,14,1,8,15,153,46,6,0.21423066557464812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495127954661052,0.0,0.10726053300874128,0.0,0.0,0.2569802787909577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728420994366542,0.11231976598542548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241093326942886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11957613655811165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246167769460405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11043120468525194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962683542727173,0.0,0.0,0.24106905844180304,0.10832146142581717,0.07652321514591982,0.10284751740314774,0.0,0.0,0.09111224734900476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055963340359053884,0.0,0.06087611209684904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14359429934606655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773557118390746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638112248866145,0.0,0.0,0.15699342298631214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994990185542785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09667576990236824,0.0,0.07150031639972934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815595096625233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451682433265845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022537054980426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10768049490469644,0.0,0.0,0.10714431971762006,0.0,0.0,0.11013240213885256,0.0,0.23000356123869886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950275519980604,0.33523395924966565,0.0,0.0,0.08860691018098134,0.2408042440189309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16492523272271942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11417069260275972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861740703174343,0.0,0.24873831455927314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06245981194697681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838136757469463,0.06317939854053993,0.08502316535823544,0.08592145886471922,0.13043761829629574,0.0,0.0,0.0966549271163332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559624760132565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711380115629072,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,macanxietyresearch,2020/04/09,"COVID-19 Mental Health Survey Hi everyone,

Researchers at McMaster University would like to learn how living people in North America have been coping with the COVID-19 pandemic.

If you are interested and currently reside in Canada, please [click here](http://fhswedge2.mcmaster.ca/redcaps/macanx/surveys/?s=xPWFAU) to participate in the research study. If you currently reside in the USA, please [click here](http://fhswedge2.mcmaster.ca/redcaps/macanx/surveys/?s=Test4N) to participate in a research study. ",14.261690140845067,17.80876474647888,10.22405633802817,47.052985915492975,49.42253521126761,13.003943661971828,43.777464788732395,12.340626583579946,6.897972394366198,431,21,43,13,5,122,48,71,0.0,0.846,0.154,0.8466,2,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,4,0,4,1,0,1,0,7,4,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,2,10,2,0,9,0,0,2,0,3,7,0,2,3,24,2,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30396855291034985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381369617919384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1554128946457765,0.0,0.2808977117476775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.320580919909448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205380119613027,0.0,0.0,0.6983803806079076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259768233172747,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,norsewolf,2020/04/09,"The light has been out for a while now, and I don't know how to put it on again I used to be a very creative teenager. Writing, drawing, paiting, reading,playing piano,writing music,.... Name it and I enjoyed it. I studied ancient Greek and science, and while my studies were not easy, I still found plenty of time to do what I enjoyed.
I was diagnosed with clinical depression, but my suffering only served as an additional source of inspiration to me.

However, once I entered university (pharmacy), everything was put to the background. My depression and my interest for my hobbies all had to make room for studying. I assumed my passions would re-emerge after university, but boy.....Was I wrong.

In 2019 I entered my last year of pharmacy university. I got the opportunity to pursue an internship in Paris, which has always been my dream city. However, the internship itself was dreadfully boring and after hours, I felt very, very lonely. I obliged myself to go to the Louvre every wednesday, as I used to love art so much. However, it was more out of a challenge (to see the entire louvre) than out of interest.

After the internship, I was not ready for the job market at all. I decided to study Toxicology (in Paris); extending my period in Paris with 2 more years. I thought living as a real student would give me more free time/opportunities to meet fellow students/take up hobbies, but none of that came true.

After class, all I do is randomly surf the internet until it is time to sleep. I can't focus enough to watch Netflix. I can't put effort into reading a book. I occasionally motivate myself to sport, but rather to lose weight than to be active, I haven't drawn anything in years, nor touched the piano.
Besides schoolwork, my mind is now a blank screen, while it used to be a beautiful painting. I miss the old me. I feel empty.

TL;DR : used to be a pretty creative kid. Then I made some unlucky career choices and now I can't find the energy/focus to write/paint/read/watch series/do sports any more. It's all just work and no play. I don't even like work.",4.069050608385645,6.138780744245532,5.387942338990931,77.53717662559096,72.75959079283888,8.217654808959157,29.751298147717584,8.927757054556999,2.7104400682011933,1625,70,287,34,33,542,209,391,0.10800000000000001,0.726,0.166,0.9798,4,2,0,0,0,0,79.0,0,0,0,7,10,22,0,1,22,0,28,6,1,8,5,54,46,23,0,3,8,0,4,1,1,2,2,0,1,1,11,16,1,0,10,8,1,7,11,9,0,0,15,8,43,14,55,25,12,45,0,6,3,2,7,13,0,3,26,201,54,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483596524907936,0.0,0.0,0.07750660998572223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379135262435333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035653486929002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963322451452207,0.11568178049544448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776618906378393,0.0,0.07527912276795137,0.0,0.0960284835127006,0.0,0.10243298650489244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05762896270662385,0.0,0.10943345237183474,0.0,0.10417068413433836,0.0,0.0,0.12496722355036645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093347845994285,0.06477436968769369,0.0,0.09115586838416324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224198437740174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310216545029685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626374381557535,0.09290447937860304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055682213535984605,0.0,0.10064162567046483,0.0,0.0,0.1275083804445908,0.0,0.0,0.10286649136751523,0.10784548561858512,0.0760789046431705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508181633982367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378441657982813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11959712941844952,0.12137918797496908,0.0,0.08668278970034328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595310335794877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3437277420417745,0.0,0.0,0.2280108087153876,0.12972800287845987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09082296895836073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405687228781425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09102023181944596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904830705288485,0.19937844962441587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3937497069779007,0.0,0.2821228481713536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13879031064376832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16594967600129704,0.0,0.0,0.16192851640548098,0.12461329067073056,0.0,0.22018764187406786
mentalhealth,thefenriswolf24,2020/04/09,"2 therapy sessions in. I dont feel better. I feel worse. My anxiety is through the roof. My brain is telling me the opposite of what i know to be true and its causing me to lose my wife. I have a psychologist appt on Sunday to try and get meds. Im having trouble letting her go. All she needs is space, and my brain keeps tricking me into thinking she wants to see me and im making the situation worse. But when i just sit on my hands i feel like my skin is crawling and all i want to do is see her or hear her voice. I'm scared im losing my mind",-0.5807857142857173,1.4248226833333315,2.011190476190474,95.91000000000004,88.83333333333334,5.095238095238095,20.238095238095237,6.5431188927421005,0.09805952380952387,422,14,102,5,14,145,74,120,0.17300000000000001,0.765,0.063,-0.9261,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,2,8,1,1,4,0,11,4,4,2,3,24,27,8,0,3,3,1,5,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,6,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,0,9,23,3,11,25,2,9,0,2,2,0,8,5,0,1,3,62,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054936706100336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12780690364615988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226407740239882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845105689506444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936405024387294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21920502595965755,0.10323761109928957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755002459944763,0.0,0.08212807543314987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16287270191269268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4682851531116026,0.0,0.0,0.1284466777182099,0.0,0.0,0.07941863843056944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477707480195716,0.0,0.0706000391144976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3233383184738786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646120910988663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051747005172118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459133935059594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715195842823236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14467921297450478,0.0,0.23031071337748624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243472551225094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263076669165981,0.0,0.1652592000541856,0.0,0.0,0.09259584845866063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811246029934133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704708868695008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29453503953134696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pro-Procrastinater,2020/04/09,Does anyone know of any mental health helplines that offer online messaging instead of calling? My mental health has dropped insanely since the beginning of quarantine but due to having a family of ease droppers as well as phone anxiety I only feel confortable texting.,9.410666666666664,11.364638955555556,8.615555555555558,60.01000000000002,59.444444444444436,12.222222222222225,41.66666666666667,11.855464076750405,6.139666666666669,223,12,27,7,3,70,39,45,0.043,0.8340000000000001,0.12300000000000001,0.5927,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,5,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,7,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,2,17,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730394071539821,0.0,0.1946588201584417,0.0,0.0,0.1779221700551419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598289290531408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226769343749864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398793046177328,0.0,0.1286610463738529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5409515385525638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13984284909522493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5128653813430776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935259269237015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21048936433795085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287872982030176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsnotliving1,2020/04/09,"An overthinker I tend to overanalyze my every move, overthink what other people may think about me. I am very critical and critical towards myself. I can be doing something and be like “damn that’s shitty let me scrap that” and the people around me are like “what are you talking about, it is actually great”. Being such a perfectionist stops me from doing a lot things and from being happy. It’s like a voice in my head tells me that I suck and I should just give up. When there are times that I’m proud of myself - but there’s very few. I care too much about my social status and I make an impression of being overly confident when in reality I’m really self-conscious. And I don’t know how to stop. Any advice?",2.766268412438624,4.90729260992908,4.205957446808512,84.22615384615386,76.80141843971631,6.891653027823242,20.77523186033825,7.882392219407189,0.9335123840698314,562,14,109,9,13,186,89,141,0.095,0.73,0.174,0.9104,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,1,12,10,2,0,6,0,17,1,1,2,0,19,26,11,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,2,0,1,0,0,10,8,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,19,8,15,18,3,12,0,0,0,0,5,6,2,2,8,86,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.18202356583886856,0.0,0.0,0.18227214646453493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12684484038183466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16604868611117954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19017683396062288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571571465391404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17893381355798635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20564681234252788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19856159160232287,0.0,0.0,0.1914306419598162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025104290622079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907366215497719,0.0,0.2733831923256727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15857869026944166,0.0,0.0,0.12450830345522125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19824881316254198,0.13711889798187785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25862884319243884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949405172167345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19458847003978968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19014091266491776,0.0,0.14359769269035755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31189005503627193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14992343648244555,0.1630329276015778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12392033272115695,0.11951904921128505,0.0,0.0,0.10876546582218592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3078088234535193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fawnhuntr,2020/04/09,"Brain doesnt function properly (at times) Hello all, im posting as i during this pandemic its hard to find help for mental health issues. I am more or less looking for people who have maybe gone through something similar (probably not) or advice on what i should do. I have been to the hospital and theres no more help for me there. I have been given medication that i dutifully take. I have suicidal ideation but would never do it, therefore i never get admitted. I have a psych who i see somewhat regularly but even he is only so much help. I am planning on getting a referral to CAMh in Toronto as my problems have significantly impacted my life. 

There is more to it than just a chemical imbalance i believe. Yes i will not deny that i am severely depressed, but my depression lies in the fact that my state of mind is not right. I feel as though i only have access to half of my minds capabilities most of the time. I do not speak much to anyone (not even my best friends) although i so very much want to. I have a hard time comprehending what people are saying when being spoken too and i have no personality aside from a gloomy mute human. I know inside there is that confident, talkative person. It just seems like i dont have access to that person unless i go a night without sleep. That is the only time i feel normal surprisingly. Tired yes but i feel more competent and my brain is working just fine. Most of the time i feel like my brain is shut down... as if part of my brains activity is very low. That is why i am pursuing camh as i hope they have more tests or scans they can do to figure out my problem. 

I guess if someone doesnt have advice more or less asking what people think about this. I have gotten an mri done which shows nothings damaged. So thats good. I know theres something not right with my head... because the odd time (like when i havent slept, and other fleeting moments, my brain is working properly. I have confidence, im chatty and i have my wits back... i can rationalize things and i feel on the ball, my mind wanders). 

A little about me, im 26. In the past 5 years i have had 3 psychotic episodes, i am pretty sure ive been diagnosed schizophrenic. My doctor says i am high functioning despite when i tell him that my brain doesnt work entirely. He looks at me and tells me “thats an odd thing to say”. He believes im just depressed but i have a strong feeling parts of my brain arent fully activated during the day. Everything is a struggle, i dont go see people much anymore cause i have nothing to say. No drive. No personality. Please help, i hate living like this. I know the man i am inside. I just dont no whats wrong with my brain.",2.731732352356336,4.657747846728976,4.244501889043548,84.90594949294095,76.14018691588784,7.319546629548618,25.02783853648837,8.197803283752503,1.5385331079737523,2098,73,425,37,47,698,244,535,0.12300000000000001,0.723,0.155,0.9606,1,0,2,0,0,0,63.0,0,0,2,7,23,22,1,1,21,2,61,19,11,2,5,70,91,32,1,9,24,0,8,4,1,3,8,5,0,6,27,10,0,1,14,2,0,4,22,10,0,1,9,18,73,12,44,78,19,39,0,5,5,0,29,16,0,12,21,298,100,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169299938111926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05667762715219232,0.03996073840323377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05342770859233375,0.0,0.0,0.04394496486210748,0.0,0.03483822253922536,0.0,0.0,0.1287773766380145,0.0599755936363604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5103880603945229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05870898309535703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03685714163251196,0.0,0.14767011269142707,0.0580062351261477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058495636364258974,0.0,0.05848448173142365,0.20093877478603486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549431685207998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05136290152545059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17338110529694312,0.04082810383167265,0.0,0.0,0.05223423404505818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044154091432607984,0.0,0.05971722611470845,0.0,0.06495953471947706,0.047934863997623575,0.0,0.0,0.06295737232955767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239068126259213,0.05642397619161404,0.0586525779957972,0.06074797456164769,0.0,0.0,0.1532262582579186,0.060382308582943627,0.0,0.05676302921201231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24692802878701764,0.05964994541888896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422474178218378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0403668660429822,0.11168277517443227,0.05727949961097555,0.050464660702111336,0.0,0.09598352410047653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057415042688950535,0.0,0.0,0.057572799233550485,0.05759394496361463,0.0,0.17311618654455713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804784806119075,0.0,0.08815549227491125,0.0,0.0,0.05363157748925649,0.05599504750763752,0.10967428838062708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13039587372913578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377616297369662,0.054556318592815414,0.15848297056321367,0.1996053498414335,0.0,0.06273374163340943,0.0,0.0,0.054734079792905836,0.05814228436130055,0.06161756586597177,0.10937001815359994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976118920475644,0.0,0.1817924849164485,0.0,0.0,0.09108259692564034,0.0520273823298596,0.0,0.06456344228959099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057191458528255364,0.0,0.04842316658589769,0.08799400957246625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059745782361178515,0.0,0.06251302692015201,0.0,0.053863373345715115,0.0,0.04296982695328327,0.0,0.09990356198086567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593608740776722,0.03661953114757842,0.05614976693695242,0.0,0.1999483959957912,0.06568573092549848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943097763271976,0.03370866002842444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05156915313377049,0.0,0.0,0.05509073926623655,0.0,0.12481804676603772,0.0,0.0,0.04059785195221163,0.06248475609150945,0.0,0.03680284562160634
mentalhealth,NoOneEver_,2020/04/09,"Gf has severe panic attacks and anxiety - at a loss on what to do My girlfriend is struggling. She has anxiety and panic attacks, often daily. They seem to just be getting worse and worse. Sometimes they're manageable, walks, hot showers and me helping her through them can be enough.

Other times, like when I'm writing this, we end up at the hospital. She gets extremely dizzy, her throat feels like it's closing up, she can't breathe, her entire body goes numb. It's terrifying for me. I can't even imagine how she feels. I love this girl to the ends of the earth and it's horrifying to watch her struggle like this. Everytime we go to the hospital they don't help. She's tried a couple therapists and is on her third one now.

I just feel so helpless. This time she said she felt like she was having a heart attack, and she really couldn't breathe. It was gut wrenching to hear her voice break over the phone as I was driving her to the hospital. She keeps saying she can't live like this and I'm scared what that might mean if this continues. I don't think she'd ever self harm or attempt suicide but it still scares me. I don't want her to have to suffer like this. Does anyone have any advice for me or her going forward? Also do these sound like symptoms of panic or could it be something else? I'm at a total loss on what to do and I'm just so scared for her. Any advice is appreciated, thank you for reading.",2.494137651821859,4.524264196491231,3.507456140350879,89.43956477732796,77.21052631578948,6.3495276653171375,23.94399460188933,7.321109707123232,0.9531727395411602,1116,37,230,14,26,358,151,285,0.20600000000000002,0.706,0.08800000000000001,-0.9812,1,0,1,0,0,1,32.0,2,1,3,3,13,26,3,8,10,0,28,9,6,1,2,38,49,20,1,4,8,0,5,7,2,1,2,5,1,2,19,12,0,1,8,1,0,5,7,17,0,2,5,11,39,9,27,37,2,25,0,4,1,1,40,11,0,7,17,153,58,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19202695617094534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07857434826194318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336333009566683,0.0,0.1503293447772563,0.0,0.0,0.0687020583602801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353371447811706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913896089908147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844848290222489,0.108717095313562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598345971262202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207929872093989,0.0,0.17404922320632038,0.10152349966396156,0.0,0.064896385420913,0.088877114642589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490417756359142,0.07019326679799694,0.09434004066379986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10266818175999316,0.0,0.11168096295720613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107403290112254,0.11643244101165635,0.1317162764979212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733340322762154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360164120538174,0.0,0.08676081081643933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867881592166113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702830909720128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423284251959153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658001245105029,0.0,0.0,0.3458426017736457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982814144111376,0.0,0.06294455702015647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346283895086016,0.07813618070668263,0.295110662334384,0.0,0.0,0.08944750272355745,0.10250121132735007,0.1109999854197166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564136478160535,0.0971765345515311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846643037357971,0.0,0.0,0.2054345535429904,0.0,0.10747483143100517,0.0,0.0,0.10212438454582497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045984214732668,0.0,0.11408142511687246,0.0,0.06295772467065915,0.0,0.0,0.11458635750697742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670857673543104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057953241633098784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20026012216902875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,missPlots,2020/04/09,"Any advice or knowledge about treatment for psychosis? Does anyone have experience or information about insurance reimbursement for evidence-based treatment for psychosis i.e. Cognitive Behavior Therapy for Psychosis??

 In the U.S. more generally and whether the U.S. healthcare system provides any psychosis support? I've called and the insurance representatives say ""it's an 'on the fence' topic and I can't really answer that for you. I could lose my career if I say the wrong thing.""

Or has anyone been to a Hearing Voices Group? What was that like?",7.460434782608697,10.514352652173915,6.979782608695654,65.50380434782613,65.95652173913044,9.817391304347826,36.5,10.125756701596842,4.6460608695652175,452,23,61,12,8,141,66,92,0.07400000000000001,0.87,0.057,-0.3736,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,7,0,6,0,0,0,0,14,8,8,0,2,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,5,3,0,1,3,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,4,5,2,10,5,1,3,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,4,1,42,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297134933555399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3197194081862258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3287411338772025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400388235051211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18768901424308507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20571654412725865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22994938231615364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.264947675469736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148462328664842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629898530076243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15059567020314896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3738836543680541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26676139726995624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2688298308443077,0.0,0.15617401275677906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570186436532537,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,here4thecat,2020/04/09,"How do I release myself from unnecessary resentment? A few months ago, someone who I was close to said some things that really hurt me. I've tried to avoid this person since, but its very difficult because we have so many mutual friends and hobbies. In a few months, this person is going to be my superior in a semi-professional setting. 

I want to be able to put aside my anger and ignore what this person has done to me, but I've been finding it very difficult. I find myself rolling my eyes when I see their name, getting angry when I see their face, and I often find my thoughts drifting towards imaginary fights with this person.  

How do I stop this negative mindset? This person has created a lot of unnecessary stress in my life, and I want it to stop. I would appreciate any recommendations or resources you think will help me put this behind me.",7.253148148148147,7.127428141975307,7.527530864197531,73.1538888888889,63.87654320987654,10.656790123456787,34.04938271604938,10.25414643259724,3.3854641975308635,677,26,124,14,9,221,100,162,0.23600000000000002,0.6509999999999999,0.113,-0.9764,0,1,0,0,1,0,17.0,1,1,2,0,6,11,3,2,4,0,13,3,2,2,0,28,22,12,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,5,14,7,0,4,5,0,0,4,1,9,0,0,5,4,25,2,15,13,4,17,0,1,3,0,15,5,0,4,7,89,39,0,0.1315310291234313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659432118975067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894456101951097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018009452676937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460190939118255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3606509331999305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162054682393808,0.0,0.0687195339739662,0.0,0.07475211498460163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816247626633557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14080668706608307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290425570453678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182297736662858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335181891981024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099736251342156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5742391062114041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26445002676612506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426214530095881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511612899897906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2096264016632538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880382649505342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144581414196074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21993165983360585,0.15066834946393134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738337123101657,0.08427977247211475,0.0,0.10442094496547974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893009348513019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21705374814111625,0.15516081765691028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934358692796988,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw_faraway4412,2020/04/09,"I enjoy causing emotional pain to those close to me throwaway account for obvious reasons. I have been diagnosed with severe depression and anxiety. In recent months it has become noticeable that on a day I feel particularly depressed that I tend to become standoffish and isolate myself. However, whenever someone close to me such as a friend or family member does anything (sometimes even so much as a friendly conversation) I tend to lash out at them for reasons unknown to me. The thing is, I purposely say things that I know will hurt the other person. Cruel and foul things that should never come from someone close. But in the moment, it feels satisfying to me. I have no idea why.  Soon after though, I feel TERRIBLE about the things I've said. I'll spend days or on a couple of occasions weeks doing nothing in my life aside from thinking about the things I said. It's put a huge strain on my relationships with my family and the remaining friends I do have.",6.493689138576782,7.805022769662923,6.834325842696633,72.48366104868914,65.68539325842697,10.202996254681649,33.372659176029956,10.317481424215053,3.705301872659176,775,33,129,19,12,251,114,178,0.162,0.7340000000000001,0.10300000000000001,-0.8824,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,0,7,11,1,1,11,0,10,3,0,3,2,26,20,11,0,1,3,0,3,0,3,2,3,3,0,1,14,11,0,0,8,0,2,2,2,7,0,0,3,6,20,4,27,15,1,23,0,3,0,0,10,12,0,2,9,97,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260831803152456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961964401414404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26739601920872363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435894527978406,0.0,0.1042799363529628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13394733214835575,0.0,0.15614357523454667,0.0,0.20853253335836933,0.12287036565123835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10593784725551453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13617289642907018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07995704510069236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22824364098311398,0.0,0.1836302576655957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805851481754175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295940843635894,0.13665868337992612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652979316788213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550618015648441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966265887535635,0.0,0.08899086664251818,0.0,0.09336666606983958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615751208952801,0.13782426290756414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881324488209187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10570235366777317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12169577948595092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2489336353219773,0.1195292403546607,0.12996997596575546,0.0,0.0,0.23030596791372224,0.09626943140575574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367600180320738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20514250481731652,0.0,0.119728525794934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40212465115284224,0.07756847470439665,0.11893794485664184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710466988813986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092351656350618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Eggplantsauce,2020/04/09,"I feel like something is wrong that I'm just not getting I'm a trans girl in the US and I'm 19 years old. For the past 5 years or so I've been getting short depressive episodes that last like 1-4 hours during which I feel super depressed and sometimes suicidal. I've self-harmed a couple of times during these too. I thought it was bipolar disorder because I used to also get episodes of extreme motivation where I would study a language very intensely for like 8 hours. I'm currently taking Latuda daily and have been taking it for a while. The intense moments of motivation have stopped but I still get the episodes of depression; I literally just came down from one which is why I'm writing this. Almost always my episodes of depression are linked to gender dysphoria, and they usually happen in clusters around every 5 days or so. I've tried a lot but nothing makes them stop except cutting or just waiting them out by venting to my friends. However I'm beginning to feel really guilty about venting to my friends because I feel like it's the same thing over and over and I'm just wasting their time.

Edit: I just wanted to clarify that when I say depressive episodes, the symptoms are crying, loss of appetite, oversleeping, loss of enjoyment in general, etc",7.1196785714285715,7.413639325000003,6.9765476190476186,75.5775,64.08333333333334,10.19047619047619,37.976190476190474,9.957137785484203,3.853369047619047,1018,50,180,20,14,323,139,240,0.175,0.705,0.12,-0.9433,2,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,4,5,14,17,1,0,11,0,10,2,0,4,0,41,35,16,1,2,12,0,4,4,2,1,2,1,0,1,11,9,0,3,8,0,0,1,1,9,0,1,5,5,18,8,28,29,3,30,0,7,0,0,10,10,0,5,23,107,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11171246009421126,0.0,0.0,0.08921547790896077,0.09282788303235023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09931314993065014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601338460751744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759633056475286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123440382641662,0.1225447761924431,0.07194776620351738,0.0,0.480437633548423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278588384948373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442026493288035,0.0,0.0,0.09399515059375096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256348462466073,0.15939873462259666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17238386410951312,0.0,0.2331445593726473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865323010964601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21973068486705746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093729496281032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180127335246754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09484537102564196,0.0,0.0,0.07446798946894377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10704601210835554,0.0,0.11706474765667513,0.0,0.07559677886481413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649782053576397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146898269649378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871797040541203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638269686095605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588528773003487,0.11033691227892194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909294496788979,0.18654037272512064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202988203398432,0.0,0.0,0.11595483736041542,0.16776032684603606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411632618852575,0.0,0.0,0.08856715767482934,0.13010450449747338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574275429225026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419442740468507,0.0963530862140974,0.12286893715176216,0.09204970105318476,0.06580170581159747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066666075127853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924989923923363,0.12197469536243405,0.0,0.14368355304426322
mentalhealth,cryptnec,2020/04/09,"vent¿ insight maybe? honestly, I'm not sure what I'm looking to achieve from this but I guess I need to try something to relieve my stress.

I think since late last year, my mental health just took a nose dive. Beforehand I could cope with my anxiety  but honestly I have no clue what happened for it to get so fucking bad.

I feel with my anxiety now, I can't cope with it like I used to, now it's preventing me from doing so much shit like j can't function or maintain my relationships anymore, I can't handle school anymore and senior year is going to be hell if I can't bring myself to attend the classes without being an anxious wreck. At home, I'm just over stressed and overwhelmed with personal issues and now I purposely avoid my friends now because I get so worked up over the thought of having to do phone calls or doing something with them over nothing because I just sit there and overthink and think and make up situations that don't feel right at all? I end up feeling so guilty and shit then afterwards because hey I would love to do something with them too. It sounds petty but 

The only thing I can relatively focus on is art now  and even that I gave up for a good couple months because of my lack of motivation.
 
 I went to my GP, opened up to them and they prescribed me beta blockers and a referral to the mental health team. The meds I've been given for my anxiety just help with the physical symptoms whilst my mind is still running a marathon in the background and man its tiring because I've got my family on my back blaming my irritability and behaviour issues on not taking my meds which isn't the case???

I also feel like through all of this I've started to be way more paranoid about things which is driving me up the walls, my anger management has gone out the window and I've just been excessively spending, eating schedule fucked and have been thinking about / wanting to s / h, all to trying and fuckjnfnbf relieve stress or feel something because most of the time? I also just feel so hollow and dense.

I don't know what to do tbh, Im desperate to see that mental health team despite the fact the appointment hadn't even come thru yet. I lost my support system at school after this quarantine shit, so I guess I'm finding it harder to cope now?",7.811439902379497,6.564945442953018,7.565858246898518,77.00801860890789,63.25055928411634,10.274923733984137,36.64927801504983,9.095868883498916,3.133497539149888,1811,73,348,24,22,577,225,447,0.18899999999999997,0.71,0.102,-0.9935,0,2,4,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,4,6,29,26,7,5,18,0,30,13,4,3,5,75,72,32,0,6,16,0,6,3,1,1,5,1,2,2,19,26,1,3,14,4,1,9,12,14,0,0,12,10,47,12,58,55,7,55,1,2,2,3,16,20,6,7,26,233,66,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12455393473893513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787235129489657,0.08797708950699873,0.15446303667165615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05988141229698419,0.06502274594837018,0.2848329005306745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07951953907242643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708280260797521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06217720818503256,0.08616770163686187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796860245975754,0.0,0.0,0.06897453198190312,0.0,0.0,0.1028719974559962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341404132992059,0.0,0.236256997436934,0.05563423537872916,0.0,0.0,0.07117674834156856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0601663776947195,0.1439891930131832,0.08137341443844302,0.0,0.04425841155366802,0.06531823073356542,0.06228410956262501,0.0,0.17157717073756193,0.0,0.06886500119071731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2483338777728366,0.0,0.0,0.052198271032060255,0.0,0.07811542359315551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08411884698209694,0.1625634693908272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04279830942286198,0.06347888375205088,0.08784689699228884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413803027849626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539576261368425,0.0,0.0850102504461491,0.0,0.07028563198647819,0.0,0.05198246603531855,0.0,0.07823635436037332,0.0,0.17300413320619767,0.0,0.2354404042645964,0.0,0.07863200235631505,0.0,0.062159439358471874,0.0,0.057247414504420925,0.05774365769423642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07472359235587422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922778715833221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799783711310396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836090867294276,0.0,0.06650520680958623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762822123611964,0.06205664922817199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398140838120692,0.0644193750588049,0.08753526603920049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398092970790888,0.0,0.0,0.05512064268655842,0.0,0.0621914331084669,0.0,0.267618186591517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837213515492334,0.0733966878149069,0.08094240810989595,0.05855264493198688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347397415273002,0.14969832719069118,0.0,0.06182440668143122,0.04540979979661175,0.08950637116040024,0.0,0.0,0.08652248777540905,0.10574463418434014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06725938308850489,0.0,0.0,0.045932956721544,0.061813905560094515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721913201947471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506915256613908,0.0,0.056694253398954036,0.0,0.0,0.05532048367203365,0.0,0.0,0.10029847011073388
mentalhealth,_zoffiee_,2020/04/09,"I feel like I shouldn’t exist I don’t know how to phrase this. I don’t mean this in a “I have depression and I don’t want to live anymore” sense. 

I’ve been experiencing these feelings of “I shouldn’t be here/I’m not allowed to be here” feelings for a while. Normally, they would happen at school. Like, you know that feeling when you walk into a wrong classroom and you realize you’re in the wrong place but no one else does? It’s kinda like that but it would happen when I was in right place. I put up with it for a while but it’s gotten more severe now. 

Basically, whenever I look at my face, I feel like there’s something *off* about it. Not necessarily that something’s ugly, it just feels like it shouldn’t exist, and this happens at least once a day now. 

The best way to describe this is that it’s like imposter syndrome, except instead of having to do with achievements, it has to do with my general existence. 

Is there a word for this?",1.5231250000000005,3.779113395833335,2.904,91.341,81.70833333333334,5.715,21.579166666666666,6.961326702584282,0.4999116666666663,740,23,158,9,20,240,101,192,0.09300000000000001,0.774,0.133,0.7594,1,0,2,0,0,1,22.0,0,3,1,2,11,10,0,0,8,0,19,1,1,2,0,36,34,11,0,7,7,0,6,6,0,5,0,0,0,0,19,7,0,0,10,0,0,2,9,3,0,1,3,8,17,7,25,24,3,22,0,1,1,0,4,12,0,1,13,113,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12897907783344584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13648413224779876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387436768609,0.0,0.11201571599176452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381153453460773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864381326567314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3945566566309278,0.2787327970394906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3450201889061166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14294906020591386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3812282396684937,0.0,0.11484047105674018,0.0,0.1092129915075752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416674339193712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742575781060586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13850375558490996,0.0881282680612463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717584604373634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13074065377480415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106579839754052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13162205698945562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692452148541016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20024455468201624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670949021547294,0.10323117696271067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847739141497378,0.28438827185512977,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lienez,2020/04/09,"I have a problem Recently, i have been feeling a little bit weird. I started having intrusive sexual thoughts about a week ago. At first they were clearly just extremely intrusive and made me feel horrible and stressed. I started looking up on the internet what they ment .As the days passed it wasn’t just about the things that were in the thoughts, it was about the thoughts themselves. I just went on spirals and spirals about these negative things in my brain. I was crying when alone and just felt this inner stress. Kinda like i thought them on purpose, just to make myself feel that i still have them. 
This evening, yet again I broke down, started crying, i even went outside and smoked a cigarette ( which is a thing that i NEVER do by myself and i find smoking foul) i started crying and feeling so bad and anxious. I can not even explain it. I told myself that i just want to feel normal again.
During the day, when im studying or distracting myself with other things, i feel good and happy. But once i have nothing else to do the thoughts about the thoughts are back again.
I know that i may have anxiety. Currently there are a lot of things that cause underlying stress - my exams coming up, online classes, a very important interview happening soon that has to do with my university application, im about to move out.
I may not feel this stress actively, but i know it’s there because i have sleeping trouble, which is a thing i always have when something stressful is happening in my life.
When I think about my life in general, everything is going great - i have a loving family, friends, an amazing boyfriend, a roof over my head and hobbies that i can enjoy. 
Maybe I just am a mess right now and it is completely normal, because i am on my period? Does everyone have bad mental times like these? 
What can I do to make myself feel good again? How can I get rid of these thoughts? How to deal with stress?",4.290413223140497,6.310038192837467,4.472250688705233,84.55019421487606,72.03030303030303,7.705013774104682,29.17988980716253,8.447377352677275,2.1999932782369136,1516,62,283,26,30,472,176,363,0.14300000000000002,0.736,0.121,-0.4896,1,1,3,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,4,1,35,24,0,7,20,0,36,6,3,6,2,66,74,22,0,4,12,0,9,2,1,2,2,0,0,0,30,16,0,0,21,0,0,6,5,14,0,1,18,10,48,10,36,54,2,51,0,1,1,1,10,18,0,5,29,218,78,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062120566801469726,0.0,0.0,0.07258043076842205,0.0,0.0,0.058311118155913284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05361003746894742,0.07916901901249984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05388621850530925,0.11702562653705315,0.08543868804883405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650782411665759,0.0,0.0,0.07823104032287896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0719901609030254,0.0,0.060366621638012624,0.07347621624286697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309345863717662,0.09038996816689784,0.07224809460571248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06132636982797241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05854178751825762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388590228675337,0.0,0.0,0.06696323071331446,0.06298224479987395,0.0,0.06606399082309455,0.0,0.2834712965498106,0.0,0.06728657165774471,0.0,0.06405069063182961,0.059608932864327314,0.0,0.0,0.054142653801335004,0.0,0.036613244600894816,0.0,0.03982735784271023,0.11755742954868074,0.0,0.07726204842496566,0.0,0.0,0.12394078092637988,0.07460011235265009,0.0,0.0,0.07192099581143342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15139411029289426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702687577842332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899736048451442,0.06847385639302306,0.0702372988941282,0.0,0.0,0.058848484335093064,0.0,0.0,0.059578431132489215,0.06324879086390324,0.06631018978897579,0.09355619434396892,0.0,0.07040350460027818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07062287824396854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448260066994825,0.0,0.0,0.054049037632353164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732455468697002,0.06724243251345434,0.0,0.0,0.07463156148712201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705588131254098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919429258899681,0.0,0.0,0.05984685344608396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012934111020938,0.0,0.0,0.05395003092912694,0.0,0.0,0.1984083462313766,0.0,0.05596496517183765,0.0,0.4816496981448578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793431701219685,0.044903621226510516,0.0,0.3894427922995299,0.04086347165605853,0.0,0.0,0.06696323071331446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0578222923866333,0.04133425127344048,0.0,0.05621293099547341,0.0,0.0,0.12992737161600995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustinTheWriter,2020/04/09,Voices are telling me to stay awake I need help or advice. I've been hearing voices lately and they are telling me that I have to stay awake. I'm scared that if I end up falling asleep I won't wake up as punishment. I'm freaking out and I've been awake for about 40 hours. I find myself whimpering constantly and my eyes are bloodshot. One of my nurses are coming to visit me to see how I'm doing and I'm scared that if I tell her ill go back to the hospital after spending 7 months in a state hospital. If someone could give me advice on what to say if appreciate it. I'm losing my mind.,1.2618533333333346,3.1848240320000016,3.198900000000002,90.68128333333335,80.68,6.086666666666666,21.61666666666667,7.1686216300943375,0.6059466666666666,464,14,101,6,12,156,77,125,0.151,0.805,0.043,-0.9081,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,1,3,5,1,2,2,0,10,4,3,1,0,16,21,11,0,6,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,5,6,0,0,1,0,1,4,1,5,0,1,2,6,16,0,16,17,0,19,0,1,2,0,10,5,0,5,7,61,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32980915677968337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976150596896294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453667366403771,0.0,0.18236325870621808,0.0,0.13473643759470744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494660663493889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423821350387518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16188433425952722,0.09590685848415348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901981641587,0.0,0.1131123331644828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16618882072594227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903620040203003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18879270084454894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17039356040078502,0.0,0.1346979329969471,0.0,0.0,0.1251290458113958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143521628563114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420005392323714,0.3379046381194947,0.0,0.13447518938428296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14298482294134465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35973888874737875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4424956315807279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dayidkofquarantine,2020/04/09,"It kinda bugs me So recently I saw this video about OCD which explained the actual behaviors instead of just the ""trendy"" ocd. Some of the behaviors we had in common was invasive thoughts. My invasive thoughts ranged from sexual-toxic-rude thoughts that I personally dont want to have. Another one was constantly checking; I don't check certain items over and over, but I go back to certain places once or twice every two minutes. A lot of times I also do things in certain patterns of 5's or I have to get this certain number or else it just really bugs me. Some thoughts I also get could be like me aiming to shoot at the trash bin or catch something would be ""if you dont make this you're gonna die"" which I often try to stop thinking about before the said action. Anyway I just wanted to check that issue out and if it does turn out to be ocd i'll check out a doctor as soon as the option is available.",5.449815184815184,5.639595939560444,5.969320679320678,81.73477022977025,67.62637362637363,9.035764235764237,29.732267732267733,8.841846274778883,2.2019494505494506,719,24,143,11,11,233,112,182,0.115,0.858,0.027000000000000003,-0.9291,0,0,1,1,0,0,15.0,1,1,0,0,13,5,0,0,8,0,15,1,0,1,4,38,31,14,1,6,10,0,0,1,0,2,1,2,0,1,11,6,0,1,6,1,4,3,3,0,0,3,9,3,15,5,24,16,4,19,0,0,1,0,5,9,0,12,8,100,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.14672603266050424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404797133520443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15766166136380322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156146924982922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279421135070669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16248171536594885,0.0,0.12004724887019536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560460725052439,0.0,0.0,0.15389601589094062,0.1315777871664718,0.0,0.35243286279808994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560337225290466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668164426767664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571098931531128,0.0,0.08545093453812702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15693288454740226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345647988150797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12782752596073804,0.0,0.0,0.1003639793291741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16012452295480445,0.10188530139523268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312852975041874,0.15709030290441425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09632207815976286,0.0,0.1484586798297142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14302324624471086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157516041978305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570457619275632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989002633999848,0.09634222820165596,0.0,0.4774643411490159,0.08767395154036285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020820392806818,0.16354444842624466,0.14687623046503154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773680500573674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10680878194519604,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kobi2260,2020/04/09,"Intense guilt I’ve done a mistake, a year ago, and I didn’t know how bad it was, until the person that I hurt told me. 
I read the signs wrong, maybe I made me see the signs the way I want to see them, but eventually it happened, and I don’t know what to do. I’ve cried so much and I hate myself for it. I’ve tried to apologize, to call, but she wouldn’t answer my text or calls. I can’t look my parents in the eyes and I can seem to let myself be happy about anything. I have never felt so bad and I don’t know if anything will even make it better. What can I do? When I understood that I’m not doing something ok I immidiently stopped. This is not who I am. Please help",-0.6875317965023839,1.2609494121621625,1.7579968203497636,97.96474562798092,88.66216216216215,4.563434022257551,16.813990461049286,5.900188976854957,-0.6728899841017486,515,12,128,4,17,175,90,148,0.201,0.6920000000000001,0.10800000000000001,-0.9204,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,1,6,10,1,1,7,1,18,1,1,3,1,28,34,14,0,4,6,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,10,5,0,1,7,1,0,0,8,7,0,0,7,5,23,3,9,23,1,8,0,1,4,0,10,1,0,3,6,85,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996423313187573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598679704682301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2636711626824436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13964513912908932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.322456534515584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17344004811616562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158122311431394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10428804098117216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15160379061329535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962586989560555,0.16808197437025646,0.0,0.15588844794559134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10583357110114187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16902967292009727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603245950731458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16145815349328116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259188389664894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940389858811706,0.10539601995212744,0.0,0.15862657149711135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607086199443105,0.0,0.1217782208572704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1753235145608943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13786766853663565,0.0,0.17332109994944647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15793755087156724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516434613075397,0.14374151609824173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155514824210482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200714149677284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087526913228647,0.0,0.10720021984673468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09313045710056972,0.12532956053497318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263320142992586,0.0,0.10167908876982146
mentalhealth,ghostly103,2020/04/09,"I want to get help, does anyone have any resources for finding teletherapy? Hi all,

I've come to realize that I really can't go longer without therapy. I really want to find a teletherapist to do online sessions with but am struggling, all I've found thus far is betterhelp who wouldn't treat me because I'm still a ""teen"" at 19, and the partner site they refered me to isn't protected by HIPPA and I would have to involve my abusers (parents) to get care. 

I'm located in North Carolina, in the US if that helps.

Thank you in advance for any advice!",6.406911314984711,5.9820552110091745,7.083990825688073,76.63069571865445,65.69724770642202,10.936391437308867,36.51529051987768,10.504223727775694,3.7975125382262997,434,20,84,10,6,144,76,109,0.126,0.741,0.133,-0.4191,1,0,0,0,1,0,14.0,1,1,1,1,1,4,0,1,4,0,9,0,0,1,2,19,20,4,0,5,3,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,5,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,1,0,10,3,16,17,2,11,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,1,49,13,1,0.0,0.23057683622338898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19016718323156231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646781361908638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360733636683208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863029349713615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984142587426266,0.0,0.0,0.1676362361335612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703014270923268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3557335629500883,0.0,0.0,0.21337594187354525,0.0,0.0,0.20334768953399734,0.0,0.1105993375599512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2608812198747877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21608744690127774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493397666028877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15541297263594175,0.0,0.0,0.2034449285907864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17916748481306916,0.2225494504197634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23408761357767216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295678677673485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18759368566434226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13824284769469866,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HunkyOnion,2020/04/09,"Can anyone help me figure out what this behaviour is? I’m 18M and have been doing this since young childhood. I’ve been officially diagnosed with depression and anxiety. I’ve seen many professionals, and whenever I bring up this behaviour they don’t know what it is.

The behaviour is this: I take a pencil, and twirl it in between my fingers, holding it at the end with my index finger and thumb. I imagine it as the arm of one of the characters in a scene I have in my head, and I act it out, using the pencil to fill in the scene etc. I act out all the voices and dialogue, and twirl the pencil around imaging it as the movement of the arm in the scene. 

Scenes I enact can be movie scenes, TV scenes, book scenes, games, videos etc., and can be starring completely original characters or other characters from other media. I then proceed to act it out with this pencil.

Like I said I’ve been doing it for many years, since early childhood. It has developed however. I’ve used straws, spoons, various long straight plastic objects, and finally pencils. It’s been pencils for a number of years now, since Galway through grade 2 I’d say.

I can’t stop doing it, it’s my number one pass time, and it’s compulsive I’d say, I feel compelled to do it. Does anyone know what it could possibly be? If there’s any questions you need clarifying I’m happy to answer.",3.5262816131237185,5.359950541353385,4.784853041695151,82.2928024606972,73.66165413533834,8.144634313055366,27.1285030758715,8.841846274778883,2.189532330827068,1068,40,204,22,22,353,135,266,0.03,0.899,0.07,0.7878,1,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,1,0,3,3,0,0,14,0,23,6,5,4,1,37,35,16,0,3,2,0,3,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,25,19,0,2,7,4,0,7,2,1,0,2,6,8,18,2,30,25,4,35,0,1,1,0,8,13,0,3,16,132,43,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135642922021662,0.0,0.11401982503282015,0.0,0.0,0.20843293597109774,0.0,0.0,0.13268258961322296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15627195420144965,0.0,0.0,0.11900114788440333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12837314980214945,0.15127860964393974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304312081806259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13201056657625584,0.0,0.3324515024080009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07536216434552392,0.0,0.0,0.16327266924886918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15866229832062256,0.0,0.0,0.15296425344518302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999024297120444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163823629188242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281637445018778,0.0,0.0,0.13190106952745176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30221861455805377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11051576211349308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20199493004110453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680270337793495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16696569373173106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417769306456791,0.23705481231517075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.369877313653931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12460917682033087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206408524871082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08690995396442651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25745587578361656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1919615470464308
mentalhealth,mand3rs0n,2020/04/09,"Is this emotional abuse? Hello, 
Something I’ve wondered for probably the vast majority of my life has always been weather my mother is emotionally abusive or I’m just overly sensitive or actually that much of a hand full. So I guess the context of this situation would be due to the virus I was forced to move across the country temporarily and stay with my mother and step dad. I am completely independent from my parents, I’m still on my moms phone bill which is considered a bday gift yet my mom turned off my phone while I was traveling due to the fact that I refused to give her my keys upon my arrival. I’m not 20 and I feel that I have paid for my car and that it’s not right for her to ask that of me. (I know it’s a little thing but it’s honestly the principle of it) so then she tells me not to come to “stay where I am” which is at my fathers (my parents are divorced) despite the fact that it’s my birthday the next day as is my twin brothers so I obviously wanted to celebrate together. Despite her telling me not to show I did anyways (my step dad knew and was fine with it) she was very cold to me warmed up on my bday. The next day I asked her is she could turn my phone back on so that I could call my insurance. She told me it had already been turned on but I told her it wasn’t because it wasn’t working. Which somehow escalated because I had necessary phone calls to make to school and work etc and I can’t call or search anything to fix it. I also needed to take a test for school. My mom since my parents are divorced often tells me to stay with my dad (now that I’m no longer living with her) when I visit a few times a year when we get into arguments. But when I was younger she would often tell me to go live with my dad. My mom also has been what she calls telling me my characteristics (her top favs are: entitled, selfish, spoiled, disrespectful, and a liar) I remember when I was in 6th grade she even called me a shallow bitch (yet denies it) this lead me to have pretty low self esteem about who I am as a person all throughout high school and has returned yet again since my stay with my mom. I’m not saying that I don’t cop and attitude at times or that I’m not in anyway at fault but my mom makes me feel fucking worthless. Another thing I noticed after moving away was the fact that she had pinned me against my dad my entire childhood therefore I spent a lot of time resenting my dad. My dad moved me into my college dorm before deploying to Kuwait and I finally came clean about all of the resentment I had held towards him only to find out his stories had been completely different than my moms version. I don’t know who to believe sometimes but my dad wouldn’t say bad things about my mom because she’s still my mom when I was younger and I was only getting the bad things from my mom. Okay I know this is a long and crazy emotional rant but these are some of the text messages she sent me the day after my bday after the phone conversation I’m gonna try to attach them if I can figure out or all leave a brief description in the comments. Please let me know your thoughts, is my mom abusive?[texts ](https://imgur.com/gallery/E2Shl1L)",3.756420972644378,4.929295840062113,4.6137676754328005,86.38914166776794,71.96583850931677,7.841099511034756,27.522003435971985,8.265842613841098,1.6641323906435843,2507,89,529,38,47,811,285,644,0.096,0.843,0.06,-0.9789,4,0,1,0,3,0,50.0,1,1,1,4,30,15,5,0,28,1,52,3,1,5,7,84,93,40,0,8,19,26,4,0,0,4,1,2,2,2,37,26,0,2,12,2,3,14,13,11,0,0,30,7,108,4,72,55,11,80,0,2,0,1,83,29,2,13,33,367,145,10,0.0,0.11906956187837946,0.049034072837281714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055449095608202006,0.08036542368508312,0.04180974156354808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05268862823304939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04134920969930116,0.0,0.09394880149252126,0.0,0.047208950314092134,0.038637037683273964,0.0839087185525066,0.09189078120485597,0.0,0.04275671330374621,0.05661144990704532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25654032777819524,0.057469473945777866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04328356117269635,0.10536658220024582,0.0,0.0,0.08023668926749286,0.0,0.0,0.09721596828817007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05249768711778935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16956419706762055,0.0,0.0,0.05603897182809865,0.033187838177133014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0508130439967802,0.0,0.0,0.0550434120228879,0.04592508096180278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04645277777386983,0.05250423394294484,0.048201745782860364,0.028556673087802912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05535301654625953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053088983901633385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11045830955024537,0.0,0.0,0.05320458814302312,0.0,0.051381222814235385,0.0354911223470615,0.0,0.05036095015419256,0.08873849385654521,0.04446723967740482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042718419525941034,0.0,0.0,0.06708086606625553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6473387582073415,0.0,0.1602146408853776,0.036937514107173317,0.03725770306213448,0.0,0.0,0.10687705193016732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05720683310018002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07643060363987644,0.0,0.0,0.1673808916674441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043873965127780364,0.0,0.05515639725981048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051119522769177285,0.05417503966121032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05692034504291923,0.04291088140827503,0.0,0.07991726825010351,0.0,0.15255871455508718,0.0,0.0,0.05241884570964059,0.0,0.0,0.08313009751125577,0.0564800201404457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03868279192419295,0.04969582022778575,0.0,0.0,0.21422755380160372,0.08025504584532532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03777968257449521,0.0,0.2195915789818024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13352817461115535,0.0,0.0,0.039890707968770055,0.08789873578282202,0.0,0.0,0.0960268113157424,0.0,0.03411458797532516,0.16396375443791644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04145924787161523,0.029637132987991782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05449100487753753,0.07316120047859292,0.0,0.0,0.07138841688277793,0.0,0.0,0.03235758493824235
mentalhealth,theredrover2,2020/04/09,"Why do I suddenly get moods where I hate everything Most of the time I can be fine and ""normal"" but then the slightest things can trigger me and I get so amped up and angry and literally everything pisses me off so much and I just want to scream and smash things and then I end up tiring myself out so I just sit there thinking about how much I hate everyone and everything.

I don't want to be like this.",2.6008605851979354,4.302346710843377,3.8198278829604138,88.7951807228916,75.86746987951805,7.634423407917385,22.70051635111876,8.418075326091056,1.1942612736660934,319,9,69,6,7,104,50,83,0.205,0.711,0.084,-0.9319,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,9,7,3,0,2,0,6,2,1,2,0,19,13,15,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,9,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,12,2,8,11,3,11,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,1,6,53,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21874380975260374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17881141074748766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19291108894881606,0.5443273853139577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109546033149684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3986420096637228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863148821071198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2968194391479871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19780578910156488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682486819737057,0.12936064129935934,0.0,0.0,0.11772157244247075,0.2320386965768551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381556367308882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18217105767315536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kaiserawesome,2020/04/09,"Seeking Advice- New to Meds. Keep forgetting them! Hey guys,

Recently started meds for severe depression (they are helping A LOT) but I am absent minded and have forgotten them more than once. Any suggestions for helping to remember to take your meds?",4.996046511627906,8.38044023255814,5.0523720930232585,74.15716279069768,76.90697674418605,9.021395348837208,34.181395348837206,9.3871,4.375478139534883,202,11,29,6,5,63,36,43,0.14400000000000002,0.763,0.09300000000000001,-0.3382,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,6,6,2,3,0,1,0,0,9,0,0,1,3,19,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19450211721680608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13535578798428788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143509278273913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19708345945782646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26682810748667385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17691820117587825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16921889384166486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6632743461334548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2009762772002211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922365756139128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2119738643745541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19653054686902327,0.0,0.22547645563992805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22486147367716405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14088337104566198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14965525798685242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Puzzle8888,2020/04/09,"Can you give your self anxiety about mental health, really need advice!! Mental health is my biggest fear I’m absolutely terrified of it, I’m not sure if I’m going schizophrenic or  I’m giving my self anxiety, the other month at work I was messing around and thought they could be watching through the tv screens, I checked for cameras on them after doing this it freaked me out thinking I had schizophrenia, I also found when cleaning a little wire pipe out the wall, for a split second I thought someone could put gas through it, I’m absolutely scared and get the worst anxiety about this and my brain makes me think things to scare me, has anyone got any advice please.",6.4971850393700805,7.290073551181103,6.024872047244098,80.14234744094492,65.45669291338582,8.869685039370083,33.19783464566929,8.841846274778883,2.721662204724409,539,22,98,8,8,166,88,127,0.205,0.76,0.035,-0.9688,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,2,1,5,7,0,3,6,0,9,4,1,1,1,19,26,7,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,2,7,6,0,0,5,1,1,2,1,6,0,1,6,2,15,1,14,17,1,13,0,0,2,0,8,8,0,2,3,61,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720735342362933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11132812318760707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09466922042595012,0.0,0.31949136424807983,0.0,0.0,0.0973405619716722,0.0,0.0,0.12392856989356793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15540710272014838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222995815200363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15665267755873702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15263923469866605,0.0,0.0,0.07273274445955605,0.2670904797764682,0.07911762729715416,0.0,0.11134089078039858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959525884032769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139527418771054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09292537236186588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28058675554754664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11111802668742753,0.0,0.0,0.1032242465974452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15281343411531156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399469343490457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08918304195878847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787518394749128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904578334773698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795423298628895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312060597643413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248654701540653,0.17840339710819655,0.0,0.2210382250053336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013483008731504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SelectDate3,2020/04/09,LOSING MY MIND So long story short my memory has gotten progressively worse over the last 2 weeks a severe reaction to sertraline. I cant remember how to tue my sjoes lol. Was wondering if anyone had similar experiences?,4.64725,7.552801225000002,6.895,63.44000000000002,74.25,12.0,27.5,11.20814326018867,4.7295,179,7,27,8,4,63,37,40,0.20600000000000002,0.73,0.064,-0.7378,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,2,1,4,0,0,1,0,5,6,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,4,0,3,3,0,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,2,3,16,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21494716979533035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007044986557994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25057895559048404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.272046847642488,0.0,0.34391147783772336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31039495123127964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3482339031607869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3472841030201958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24658455494840575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3333714035175003,0.0,0.0,0.31327552267332337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kaachu_h,2020/04/09,"is my anxiety just all in my head? For the past year Ive developed major anxiety. During times when life is normal and on track, my anxiety is dormant but as soon as an inconvenience small or large happens, my anxiety attacks my chest, messes with my sleeping pattern, makes me cry. I am constantly restless but at the same time always looking for a solution to the inconvenience. My friend is telling me that its all in my head and I just need to get over it. And I am trying to but its not easy at all. Is this what anxiety is?",3.0190476190476185,4.9025545238095285,4.693333333333332,82.19333333333334,75.19047619047619,8.476190476190476,28.809523809523807,9.150863307647796,2.5882380952380952,415,18,82,10,9,140,66,105,0.23399999999999999,0.7070000000000001,0.059000000000000004,-0.9553,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,1,5,0,9,5,4,1,3,18,14,10,0,2,7,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,14,1,14,14,5,14,0,0,1,0,2,7,0,1,7,63,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14500427851123515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6665696911658929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19825410877203084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18832094384697254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19142434661483526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346384137267656,0.0,0.0910474243198806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410391778369845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3576968659582765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230900837228924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14634056561346426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632471550992192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292169276698149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707448648216448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16635777015862507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17439306313701647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15231722219091848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032332224913848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831599601139195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222236930607007
mentalhealth,The_Man_Who_Stabs,2020/04/09,"Type 1 and Coeliac I grew up with my schitzophrenic mother one week and my self-destructive alcoholic father the other week. I've watched my mother shoot up heroin, have psychotic breakdowns, and try to kill the neighbours. I've watched my father drunkenly beat up people, get drunkenly beaten up, and have had to pull his unconcious body out of a river. I was diagnosed almost 2 years ago with Type 1 Diabetes and Coeliac Disease. Currently, I go to high school and get made fun of constantly because of it. My nickname is 'Diabetes' and boy do my friends just love to talk to me about how I'm gonna die waaaay before any normal person our age. This has only been more frequent with the Covid-19 pandemic. I am sick of feeling like a burden to my family. Because of the Coeliac Disease I cant eat gluten so now my dad doesnt eat gluten either. All I ever hear is the people I love giving me pity and my friends who I have known since grade 3 make fun of me everyday. I feel like I'm just not good enough anymore... I've started smoking pot and drinking when everyone in the house is asleep. I know it wont go away either, these autoimmune diseases will follow me till the I die. I'm just so fed up on having no control over anything. For once in my stupid fucking life I just want some control.",4.231349845201237,5.652407003921571,4.961073271413831,83.39851393188854,71.11764705882355,7.878224974200207,29.89164086687305,8.371475516178862,2.2187647058823523,1026,42,195,16,19,331,155,255,0.13699999999999998,0.746,0.11599999999999999,-0.7679,1,0,2,1,0,0,25.0,1,0,0,4,11,15,4,0,9,0,17,15,2,5,2,35,39,14,3,2,7,5,2,2,3,3,6,1,0,2,6,13,5,2,4,1,0,5,5,6,0,1,5,5,28,9,29,31,6,31,0,1,2,3,18,12,1,2,16,117,34,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100143790471366,0.13263385940374442,0.12427637617488856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843977919652938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308192736356866,0.0,0.0,0.10213042562939964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166036841854536,0.0,0.0,0.1513103420697073,0.0,0.10560688728954393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13785616685852553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411681057086589,0.2783956672996629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259671510110923,0.2576093131387429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157873005693115,0.0,0.25398722445834354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12823688620856508,0.0,0.0,0.11226291917331392,0.0,0.11859064759436708,0.0,0.0,0.116998110319987,0.0,0.12550561059463922,0.17732576195218486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191771284281876,0.11473597682311745,0.12968276295808273,0.11905583803617045,0.1410670336011875,0.10409602069076447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13987889520274865,0.0,0.0,0.13112706534262492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14320413203611948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13730727024924128,0.0,0.06820658877587446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08766125054699046,0.12126593783530977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240248861415699,0.11743412415160633,0.08284314806446245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215996278663552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321711200827238,0.08409888852049666,0.0943898340212346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17208191707501233,0.10836644194980527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256040648603454,0.0,0.0,0.12947185840453684,0.0,0.0,0.10266353702017113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784438122632257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975342288167233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426128130208113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320219729737369,0.0,0.19910412980134728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992157398205349
mentalhealth,meow__mixxx,2020/04/09,"Feeling suicidal, lonely, frustrated. I (28F) feel like I’ve hit an all time low. My relationship is in shambles, I feel completely invalidated and lonely even when I’m with him. He wants to be together exclusively but won’t commit to titles, and recently cheated. But for some reason I’m really struggling to detach myself. I don’t have anyone else to talk to. I lost my job because of covid and still have a huge mortgage payment and other responsibilities. I recently went off of my antidepressants because they were making my hair fall out and now I‘ve lost about 3/4 of my hair. 
I’m so suicidal and don’t know how much longer I can live with these feelings. I know things pass eventually but I feel so intensely lonely right now that I’m not sure if I’ll get through it. 

I guess I’m just looking for some sort of guidance or advice.",3.8062698412698377,5.923877475308642,5.238906525573197,78.11222222222223,73.62962962962962,8.332275132275132,27.62081128747796,9.04235418022936,2.4300514991181656,669,26,124,15,14,224,106,162,0.213,0.736,0.051,-0.9812,2,6,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,2,10,11,2,1,2,0,9,2,2,3,3,34,30,15,2,2,7,0,7,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,9,0,0,8,0,0,3,4,9,0,0,4,8,17,2,18,23,4,16,0,6,1,0,5,6,0,6,8,76,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158038489833556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846273520357806,0.15893763481840958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18911807224911256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16263920583691086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12958192891658205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10245456447120538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3921638601737364,0.11081696664545483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104321819348151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088094657283154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539315639699998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704985714464757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578325473062911,0.0,0.1369728225649748,0.0,0.13026080065594803,0.0,0.3386611867344714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354306418646013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11403023301189215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993731335498216,0.15948805484887915,0.30632238214127666,0.16653963719063453,0.0,0.13247068526414502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12387814663934435,0.0,0.0,0.16216394467942838,0.0,0.3393497796359992,0.0,0.14619771890639024,0.0,0.0,0.12467868869757345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10305409847278883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045107271056116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149314083832266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437967659239425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jman3011,2020/04/09,Does a depressed person know their depressed. (How did you find out you had depression) MENTAL HEALTH,4.122156862745097,7.339545529411764,2.5847058823529423,86.62450980392158,93.70588235294115,4.6196078431372545,23.31372549019608,6.42735559955562,1.1912901960784312,82,3,12,1,3,23,15,17,0.32,0.68,0.0,-0.765,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,4,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,8,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7623606012788156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25819421596950226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26966405962687906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136170317013413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16214797856108318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973340624736266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25762026545202504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Leocanto88,2020/04/09,"Depression (a vent) Really struggling lately. Relationship is falling to pieces, I'm in love with someone I cant have, I feel sick, tired, and fed up of my life.

I'm gonna try to change it but it'll be hard. And the way the world is at the moment makes that change hard, if not impossible.

And I just feel so, insubstantial. And incredibly alone.

Suicide hasn't entered my thoughts though, so I know I've pulled through worse than this. I just wish things were different. I just with I wasn't so alone.",2.0803000000000007,4.348282430000005,3.0599999999999987,90.935,79.7,6.8000000000000025,23.0,7.908726449838941,1.0254000000000003,393,13,86,7,10,125,71,100,0.256,0.669,0.07400000000000001,-0.9555,1,2,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,1,4,0,9,5,0,1,0,18,20,10,1,2,6,0,4,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,4,0,0,3,4,2,0,0,4,4,9,1,10,13,1,10,0,1,0,1,2,4,0,1,2,51,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810734812850534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3892303092457314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845251186917733,0.0,0.0,0.1922087909573624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604083889583084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296007636688676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110473096753048,0.0,0.20752541412285988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12994297635898924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16603950036119286,0.0,0.12280095439289013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11785546175217378,0.0,0.0,0.1975142087202196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15587661385946538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19232468472140984,0.0,0.2012325844311211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222104634423415,0.0,0.18074892982482654,0.1460510961541458,0.0,0.21144567853463225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490309704565775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14602628879465138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115556470163334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874804612670459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CheshireMermaid2,2020/04/09,"Trapped You can either make me feel so loved I feel like my own heart isn’t big enough for this relationship, or you can make me hate myself so bad the image of me shooting myself or slamming my head against the wall over and over keeps playing in my head. Your either really affectionate or really hostile, and I don’t know how to handle it anymore. It feels like I keep giving you balloons full of happiness with a smile on my face and you take the balloon and stab it with a knife in front of me. I haven’t thought about self harm in years, yet when you closed that door on my face this morning the image of me shooting myself ran thru my head. Luckily for my own safety we don’t have a gun, so it’s only a thought. But I didn’t put this thought in my head.....you did.....you make me hate myself to a point that I never have. You are slowly breaking my heart, and there’s nothing I can do about it unless I leave you. And I love you too much to break my heart even more by doing that.",3.5096185852981963,4.137950849514564,4.297115117891817,90.46213592233013,72.05825242718447,7.050762829403608,24.423023578363384,6.868970318607317,0.6618790568654647,769,20,173,6,14,247,105,206,0.126,0.722,0.152,0.7119,0,1,0,3,0,0,23.0,1,9,0,0,11,12,3,0,9,0,13,10,8,4,1,31,32,16,0,0,7,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,11,10,0,2,7,1,0,3,6,5,0,0,5,3,39,7,25,27,8,22,0,0,0,2,15,13,0,3,6,125,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782148672387985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09919624479209674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275612601762292,0.0,0.07846881651229876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802123749911188,0.16974697549167025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139674698068714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264688978889314,0.0,0.2345883938972071,0.4877080630843485,0.0,0.0,0.4223493707961668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21119662516841675,0.0,0.0,0.06529148402266963,0.0,0.0,0.12579611369456073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608311139390605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21445020982146554,0.0,0.2379074591757792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733449287737298,0.0,0.09162884620076926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139954895931912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035567458373987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230803053645384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194306740422748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15221756537678974,0.0,0.0,0.1275508641336276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12393831631402805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893257031087239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829509376995689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650577846464003
mentalhealth,Efficient_Fuel,2020/04/09,"Help me please Hi everyone

I have really bad anxiety and OCD

Before the lock down I went to the shops and bought a hoodie from vans. I also bought some trackies from super dry.

I wore them out together when I went for a walk with my family. I have been obsessing over the fact that I wore two different brands together as my mind has convince me of your wearing a hoodie and joggers they have to be from the same brand otherwise it’s wrong and looks odd.

Please does anyone else do this or think this is weird?

It’s causing me a lot of stress as my anxiety is so bad and I’m fixating on this. Then I feel bad because of everything that’s going on in the world at the moment that my brain keeps focusing on the obsessive thoughts.",3.1629504504504524,4.803157952702705,4.368648648648648,85.70855855855856,74.20270270270271,8.717117117117118,25.171171171171174,9.2995712137729,2.0312549549549552,579,19,120,14,12,190,95,148,0.18600000000000005,0.731,0.083,-0.9364,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,2,1,3,10,0,3,11,0,9,2,2,1,1,18,22,12,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,7,0,1,3,1,3,4,0,8,0,1,8,2,18,2,20,13,3,16,0,0,1,0,5,9,0,3,3,80,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184250203648845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522425878591593,0.0,0.0,0.11527745975162315,0.1689237023795152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41296623184572506,0.10050018986282416,0.0,0.14028799457120367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18404389358417544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936179625965234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17224886284081853,0.0,0.0,0.14427449559586505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772357452706205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15753559784695312,0.1481700551571281,0.0,0.15542007426476356,0.0,0.083360710980351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369659381097296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050555198067633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653961054193038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844509984600578,0.0,0.0,0.1401623498039205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1664666789134351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3619445818663281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561675751290042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18885233070395024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563885194990967,0.0,0.13088441534803294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1610491749534768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056630623429828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18025402540725,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Creatively-bored,2020/04/09,"Not seeing my So during this carp is really messing with my mental health Long story short: we are encouraged to stay home and only go out if we need to and I 100% agree with that. I am especially doing this to the best of my ability since I have an autoimmune illness. However I have not seen my so in a good month and it’s already getting to me. We still call and talk when we can but I miss him a lot. He mentioned that he’d rather not see for 6 moths then get me sick and I actully burst into tears. I get it and understand and am not angry or upset with them,I’m just upset at the situation.",2.252142857142857,3.5504492936507965,4.401777777777777,85.94600000000004,75.90476190476191,7.897142857142858,22.91746031746032,8.548686976883017,1.3048946031746032,465,13,102,9,10,161,88,126,0.081,0.774,0.145,0.7502,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,4,0,0,1,6,7,0,2,5,0,9,3,0,0,0,28,19,14,0,3,9,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,6,16,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,1,3,19,3,13,17,2,12,0,1,3,0,11,5,0,3,5,74,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23705898105036005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254401171833578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21935502476411392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33670342309883783,0.0,0.12208703767174588,0.18018064852035307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283433922615955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154817655712177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19010875492960166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263210416372308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21648782303636185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17146710756688727,0.0,0.0,0.15928615295359325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633801311022011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376190588022746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3423671210122429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17770115088874738,0.24146644552697386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22896931437781354,0.17155536247762138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17266401066702247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2236349783157225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DarthBrooks41,2020/04/09,"Hope this is ok to post here. I’m at my ropes end. I don’t want to continue anymore due to the stress induced by my anxiety and paranoia. I don’t have the ability to take myself out but I’m failing at taking care of myself. Can someone please help me get over my panic with this virus? I have severe anxiety disorder that matures into severe paranoia the more stressed I get. I work security at a hospital so I’m front and center with COVID-19 and see all the healthy young people dropping like flies from it. The only thing keeping me in this world is my dog and I just read today something about how dogs aren’t safe from this virus and now my dogs panting and sneaking is sending me into quick, short panic attacks. I go to work everyday with my boss telling me I need to do more and stop being so worried and no one I talk to understands how intense this stress is. I can’t tell if the pain in my chest and entire body is symptoms of the virus if I have it, or from the stress. For the past few days now, I’ve just been wishing something would take me out, because existing like this for any longer is more painful that I can deal with.",4.1321551724137935,5.019149112068966,4.713275862068965,87.09681034482759,70.8103448275862,7.524137931034483,29.58620689655172,7.645422480735847,1.7044,902,35,187,10,16,288,129,232,0.235,0.63,0.135,-0.9852,1,0,2,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,11,17,1,6,10,1,19,5,2,4,1,37,36,17,0,7,6,0,0,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,11,17,0,4,2,1,0,3,5,10,0,1,1,1,26,7,30,33,5,30,0,1,1,0,6,13,0,4,14,126,37,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594586396074436,0.0,0.17086896583454694,0.0,0.11075601735438438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270515108445574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807876359730594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12405070619255755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11386465477808212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202401411975126,0.11513662171888225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12799433915763395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891485530531484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669581921903925,0.0,0.06347001203317705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485638942325139,0.0,0.0,0.11092290493410124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992658373814242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912188818517582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08280890614993383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567689388667778,0.08493726348672455,0.2376696435767557,0.26206357245886314,0.0,0.0,0.1066106834824235,0.07742447734685523,0.0,0.0,0.12259051280319175,0.0,0.0,0.10695805375092968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170968426736808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08899407219968994,0.0,0.0,0.25233200802437405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462564592446036,0.17195261236184206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336903109023086,0.511713786584609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607772254771867,0.2519071707239943,0.08976372138865255,0.1952255449016196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419487227451263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585907184668504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626225875757393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587144033175724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284258700021285,0.0,0.0,0.16260795718256532,0.11341591493332186,0.0,0.07933388571994858,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,leammming,2020/04/09,"Feeling horrendous guilt for small things I have a history of mental health problems. Mostly depression, but also some GAD and Trichotillomania. I'm recently stopped meds (since the start of January).

I've been stuck at home for about a month.

I've been 'staying afloat' mentally - lots of signs of my mental issues creeping back but I'm working really hard to keep them in control for as long as I can.

The one thing I can't control though is guilt. I'm feeling horrendous, horrible guilt over the tiniest things e.g. eating something I shouldn't, or throwing out leftovers.

There's also been a few instances where I've literally felt like I want to harm myself. I feel so horrible and guilty for tiny things. 

Last week, I was shopping for essentials and picked up a cute lipstick (I had wanted the shade for a while) whilst I was shopping. I got home and realised the lipstick wasn't in my shopping bag and I hadn't scanned it at the self-checkout either. I felt horrible - did I just forget about it (how self centred of me to just forget about it and leave it in the basket like it is worthless). Or maybe it fell out my shopping basket whilst I was browsing (what if it got lost under the shelves and wasted, what if someone stood on it and it got thrown, what if they couldn't sell it because it had been on the floor and I just wasted it?)

It happen today too. Its garbage day. I was cleaning out my bedroom this morning and decided to throw out a cheap skirt which was ripped and didn't fit any more (it cost like £5 or £6 from ASDA). I mindlessly put it in the garbage bin outside which was waiting for the garbage men to take. Then once the garbage men came an hour later I felt horrific, overwhelming guilt. I watched the garbage truck go by and felt so awful imagining my skirt laying amongst all the trash. I just threw away a skirt which I could have fixed. I could have donated it or used the fabric to make something else. I could have put it in a clothes bank or textiles recycling. I know it was cheap, but its going to lay on a tip somewhere, probably not even biodegrading, completely going to waste. I feel really awful. Even as I'm writing this I'm in floods of tears. 

I'm totally overreacting - I know this is irrational, but I can't help it. Has anyone got an advice or help to get over these feelings?",4.103203272498426,5.696666563876654,4.5177558212712405,85.7760484581498,71.68722466960352,7.6555317809943375,29.050723725613594,8.238735603445708,1.9725453241032096,1836,73,361,28,35,579,224,454,0.215,0.747,0.038,-0.998,0,0,2,0,0,0,54.0,0,0,2,4,19,14,0,5,26,2,33,2,0,6,2,75,72,36,0,11,19,0,10,3,0,1,1,0,4,3,35,17,1,5,13,4,10,10,8,10,0,1,30,12,36,4,50,37,8,52,0,4,2,0,8,25,0,12,19,233,71,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776270110462109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14364435449082447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06107485992249698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06279824805198664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438080561399276,0.06905945471275726,0.0,0.0547482210822096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027203629289244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09416558758134204,0.0,0.2014623367202424,0.2151213838206113,0.0,0.0,0.057920949792519015,0.0,0.07735446288208576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189952601056256,0.07502593494332209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863922003524695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22705681653695264,0.0,0.3449322722630377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046922771304753474,0.0,0.15312573557168968,0.0,0.2873216564988158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941996102960705,0.0,0.08045341073602165,0.0,0.0,0.0954653624435882,0.0,0.0,0.12039743206271515,0.0,0.1801763970176456,0.0,0.08844617864896584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373981108416454,0.0,0.07982853570924636,0.0,0.0,0.09871603885065897,0.07320831172032867,0.0,0.09509734870188068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163200116137047,0.0,0.0,0.07948029944418984,0.0,0.0,0.0980397975867656,0.07635447579692163,0.0,0.0,0.05994983453662332,0.0,0.09022766437179608,0.0,0.09976026486331678,0.0,0.2715264271862043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168663568015017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564625397038116,0.060858557035937524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683192403916613,0.0859374201266542,0.0,0.18057060940174244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115071018237774,0.0,0.08867796345665427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18738584107068051,0.0,0.0,0.07429295241791943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07609694285523498,0.1382824707706965,0.0,0.0,0.06356900048501643,0.09572704674762866,0.0,0.07508638650661317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752702676647379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386669237695772,0.0,0.08823928518504627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513074507788462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775682493487637,0.0,0.0,0.10594623015243293,0.0,0.07204132095427628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538379899359582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yoshikagekira1234,2020/04/09,"Need help with relationship Ok so basically I'm in an long distance relationship with an girl who is 18 , we have meet each other in real life because she is in my school . Now let me tell about her past first , so basically few years back she was in relationship with an guy who was 5 years bigger then her , he once got married but then. Lost his wife and he use to force her by faking suicide . Once , he forced her to talk to her parents about there marriage and it didn't ended up well and at the end they got separated forever . Now coming to our relationship story , we came in relationship about 5 or so months back , I shown alot and seriously alot of love like saying I love you this much and that and we where unable to spend alot of time togather because if our teachers caught us we will be dead and she neither enjoyed the fact that her friends would go away if I come to give us privacy hence she allowed me to only meet her in class and in lunch . She made an FB and we talked at first she made some fights with me to test me and I always like every time been humble to her and nice and texted her first and stuff like that . She later told me that she is unable to forget about him and she only likes me where I truly feel in love and she even admited I love her more then her ex . Now I blamed the fact that it's because we didn't spend much time in real, I mean in actual life outside FB and begged to be with me . I would often tell her how much I'm affected by her actions like being rude to me . She actually got into an guilt trip unknowingly and felt that she need to create love for me otherwise she doesn't deserve me ( she doesn't know this and I have observed this and haven't told her about this either ). I want you to tell me how can I get this relationship better ? I don't wanna leave it .",4.3116935483870975,4.7507378037634425,5.1732795698924745,85.57991935483875,70.15591397849461,8.243010752688173,24.90860215053763,8.212053250817874,1.1914118279569892,1421,35,311,19,24,464,177,372,0.113,0.726,0.161,0.9711,2,0,0,0,1,2,21.0,10,2,1,5,21,22,2,1,11,1,22,8,0,7,2,69,53,31,2,8,5,3,2,5,1,3,2,1,0,2,18,35,1,0,5,0,2,7,7,6,1,3,16,3,68,16,45,30,12,47,0,1,0,5,80,18,0,9,27,218,86,3,0.0,0.0,0.14967204239691267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06381021450807797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07205051104333524,0.11793603932131935,0.0,0.14024412112388868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06782393748553517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08771016808541307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211912917018684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13584487746620846,0.0,0.0,0.05065142701069883,0.0,0.06461259835060666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038775547467983326,0.0,0.07363210836591448,0.0,0.0,0.19569126332820724,0.0,0.0,0.05924863837908476,0.0,0.04006609829660596,0.07356571992661573,0.04358332214515424,0.0,0.18400220317217827,0.0,0.0,0.0759327665186665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05140207210219706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04214549147528079,0.0,0.0,0.08120108030469582,0.0,0.07841825198752736,0.10833341921792283,0.18732840334802586,0.0,0.0,0.06786610001127505,0.0,0.0,0.08371355863827191,0.0,0.346067700297816,0.1451272953878974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08353526242107824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06121129915919759,0.0,0.1691225975404378,0.11372574598958228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333955163859706,0.0,0.11664872900086212,0.0,0.0,0.08515248841085785,0.0,0.07320697780710593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17457452285401695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4940026042424176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06098504605903565,0.0,0.07761193075095894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778893813278585,0.08388377171404769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12327715281303335,0.20108498978926356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415144355211275,0.0,0.0,0.14655654877155516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844914462930816,0.06623345162028757,0.0,0.0,0.045232324875621684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06895134923561172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895332102826752,0.0,0.0,0.09876858161078657
mentalhealth,appeer_us,2020/04/09,Appeer.us I am creating a mental health app for my senior project at the University Of Delaware.  It is based around students helping students.  Peer to peer mental health support.  Does anyone know of apps that already do that?,5.545769230769231,8.754673256410257,4.8535256410256435,77.63105769230769,72.84615384615384,6.976923076923077,35.391025641025635,8.07648339933343,3.3054564102564106,183,10,27,3,4,55,33,39,0.0,0.8270000000000001,0.17300000000000001,0.7269,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,6,5,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,16,5,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.281820005752509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785687904570927,0.0,0.0,0.2273438161925945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234862064784353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5429175122206366,0.0,0.0,0.17117693952051982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403510782791646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.514729281827924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2898040746488006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.307192685553373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gowashyourmilk,2020/04/09,If I don’t work with my cpn and psychiatrist will they discharge me or could I find myself back in hospital? I wrote way more but idk if it was too much so basically the title.  Lmk if you do need more information,2.0536363636363646,3.9597834545454553,4.2545454545454575,84.1518181818182,78.0909090909091,8.036363636363637,22.363636363636363,8.841846274778883,1.4473818181818183,168,5,37,4,4,58,38,44,0.049,0.951,0.0,-0.2541,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,12,7,7,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,8,0,2,3,3,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,4,1,29,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701979888296503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.384391024496608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4400278496572779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35391412630896346,0.35698199367870753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3821450203372275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.350494381835887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PontDanic,2020/04/09,"After 9 years of homelessness I have a roof over my head and feel good. I am 30 years old man from germany with abitur and have been homeless since 2011, that is until last febuary. I guess I have mental health issues but im not in therapy at the moment, the current situation put that a bit on the back burner. But in the past I hated myself and attempted to end my life on a handfull of occasions, getting always closer to breaking and doing it.

Maybe three month ago I was approched by a social worker and he helped me find my way to a home for young men in rough situations in just a couple of weeks. It is still hard to belive how easy that was. For about a month and a half I just kinda houng out and got acclimated but kept some of my old habbits up (not drugs, just kinda being aimless). With Corona crashing the party, I spend all of my time at home and lazed around.

But this week I started to work in the extensive garden. Planting crops, installing watering systems and stuff. Today I planted 100+ onions, waterd some salat and cleaned up a volleyball field. I felt good doing that. Then I had myself a nice cold shower and sat down to write this. Im happy right now. Im happy that I enjoyed work. I put the fear that all this shit in my life was because Im just lazy behind me. I enjoy working. Im crying.",2.888838004101164,4.56418123308271,4.119439507860562,87.06347915242651,75.01503759398497,6.340123034859878,23.369104579630896,6.980632752743323,0.7921263157894733,1032,30,207,10,22,338,159,266,0.08900000000000001,0.7829999999999999,0.128,0.8951,2,0,1,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,0,5,10,10,2,1,17,0,14,7,2,1,2,38,23,18,0,0,10,0,5,0,0,0,4,0,5,2,12,15,1,1,3,1,1,2,2,3,0,2,9,6,25,7,37,13,5,47,0,0,0,0,6,18,1,5,24,137,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855084177578725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312059698514128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892768035907543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07681304686109597,0.0,0.0608950315208984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905940780636307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053185704637347,0.10972990681018342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158464221110195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847727122853646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1124095860163694,0.05050988589854121,0.0,0.09591481319773074,0.0,0.09130217034070674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052190985956607976,0.0,0.0,0.16757428142602196,0.07989511340861445,0.0,0.11004554460735692,0.0,0.0,0.2126800538220195,0.08948624970621777,0.09862557726227664,0.10252103366681806,0.10618365565571487,0.0,0.0,0.06695747620260728,0.0,0.20040555033260665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5395184154217578,0.10426436946986332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142771329696777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14111750835276352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10035789944164908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067060941537301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15947038472044256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20964588210520124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536102872737263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008440225803069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853097375498758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025407259181327,0.08263413111590402,0.22457220811427805,0.0,0.10183031676220088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07070615650642521,0.0,0.07977623243131116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435581281998405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423857598900125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058249545993186186,0.0,0.09468872782425257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929195792688461,0.1602593992499001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181741299699455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865813929876274
mentalhealth,lxveangi3,2020/04/09,loneliness i feel like i'm lacking self love. how do i fix my loneliness and learn to love myself more??,2.21142857142857,4.340778000000004,3.676428571428573,87.40607142857145,78.52380952380952,8.009523809523811,24.785714285714285,8.841846274778883,1.9291714285714288,82,3,17,2,2,27,17,21,0.188,0.435,0.377,0.7691,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,5,5,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,3,1,5,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,10,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21857595133059105,0.3088240193444886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21119229332271225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7803069899125691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45096684502358003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cute-Mechanic,2020/04/09,"Lockdown is making me crazy Hello, of course i’m also in lockdown at home, more than a month now, with my family and i don’t know if i can take it anymore.
I am stressed for uni and they are making everything worse, day by day i become angrier and more stressed and i feel trapped, i can’t even take a walk or jog cause we’re at a point that that is forbidden too. 
Do you have any advice about being angry as hell and overwhelmed by this situation? 
Thank you so much in advance",0.9109090909090902,3.1838833232323225,2.580606060606062,92.59090909090912,84.45454545454547,5.6202020202020195,21.12121212121212,6.980632752743323,0.5037393939393939,375,12,81,5,11,123,73,99,0.26,0.705,0.035,-0.975,0,3,0,0,0,1,8.0,0,2,1,1,6,5,1,3,3,0,10,0,0,3,0,13,18,10,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,0,2,1,0,3,2,4,0,0,0,1,11,1,12,17,3,12,1,1,0,0,4,5,1,2,4,55,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947046210906472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15934001153636973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549671226730267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976022844785386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22005577533695875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046844542010033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569993047301277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13160262897968386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179072893288594,0.0,0.18783500042707812,0.0,0.10074669734053608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19986381839466605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095024919360368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660016082227358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15903930783452122,0.0,0.14647154594804346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18835548605236574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22396514939106688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4564799983044864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996221400312388,0.0,0.0,0.18344246704130102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030525921151224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nonlincoder,2020/04/09,Constant regret I have constant regret about past. Opportunities thrown away etc. Does anyone know about resources to deal with this?,5.866428571428571,9.362743142857145,3.8765476190476207,76.62053571428574,93.76190476190477,4.0047619047619065,24.29761904761905,5.985473137389443,1.2147047619047622,110,4,14,1,4,31,18,21,0.222,0.675,0.10300000000000001,-0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,5,2,1,4,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21756782470373234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923417275747411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6724991645502818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207886372870376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722951063863861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34702169242785164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17100344756693858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29703403976944776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,troutlegs1,2020/04/09,"Anger or stress? Today (like the past few days) I wanted to sit down and read about the immune system and virology. I enjoy reading it and I'm interested in following it during my university degree. 

But whenever I sit down to read or study it, I suddenly get angry. My brain feels like it is pressing against my skull, and I seem to lose the ability to remember anything (as I have been studying it for a while). My anger stems from thinking about my parents relationship problems.

How do I fix this and open my mind to learning?",4.328737623762375,6.131865574257429,5.573353960396037,77.59092202970297,71.47524752475249,8.614356435643566,30.446782178217827,9.188382445141503,2.811048514851485,417,18,76,9,8,139,68,101,0.17,0.716,0.114,-0.8105,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,3,9,2,1,4,0,4,3,2,1,0,18,11,11,0,2,3,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,6,0,0,5,3,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,2,13,4,14,10,1,13,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,3,7,52,19,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490445102006826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237022663221204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12923540737963202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132354627674094,0.14315913816197146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469585679574528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958015232280496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22418590722204365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20233745665144992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22251012979768334,0.0,0.19129557383408427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19174681249196646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6013347102762081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21514459068616387,0.2270035707921667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18242814424773995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22954684100598005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840225303130431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18994692870338625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1181956119774676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,avethrow,2020/04/09,How did you get yourself to see a therapist or counselor? Hi! It's my first time posting. I'm not sure if this is the right sub for this. I've thought about seeing a counselor for a few years but I can't get myself to try. I'm scared that I'll just waste their time when I freeze or can't open up.,-0.3350319829424322,1.4680687164179105,1.3518123667377395,102.41850746268658,85.71641791044777,4.4255863539445635,18.526652452025584,5.288315135182226,-0.7527168443496803,232,6,60,1,7,75,50,67,0.151,0.828,0.021,-0.8411,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,1,1,4,2,0,1,4,0,4,0,0,1,1,10,11,6,0,1,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,2,3,6,1,6,9,1,9,0,0,2,0,3,3,0,3,5,34,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444632746178002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003104816484203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752508603399799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2454390150265001,0.0,0.0,0.28773869250748313,0.0,0.4580430192786679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2708721862195853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33369489102354244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281644131102983,0.3351718480191069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19512651793453986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18507692024119085
mentalhealth,yobab77,2020/04/09,"I'm a Coward I hate myself every time there's a opportunity to learn something new, here I am hesitating when to start, staring blankly on the screen, then the worst part procrastinating on memes, funny videos, netflix or even house chores.

Challenges I hate that, I envy my friends, always ready to take on new challenges, being the best version of their self and then they reap the rewards of taking the risk, the opposite happens when I face new challenges, panic attack, complaining, whining and thinking negative constantly. My friends are earning near six digits yet me is stuggling to get by on my meager income, most of the time thinking I might get fired on every messed up I did on the office. 

I always wanna learn to code so I may better my chance of earning more or atleast a self fulling hobby, when there's an opportunity or time to learn I always hesitate on starting maybe because I'm scared like a kid who is afraid of math. Coding is painful especially the debugging part but it is very fulfilling once everything run. When I was a kid I love to draw but my parents enrolled me on a engineering course focusing on IT, so there goes my hobby slowly getting forgotten. I envy my friends in college who are quite into technical stuff, I do love tinkering but when it comes to tinkering something about school there goes me, avoiding it or procrastinating on studying. I know a bit of coding stuff but I'm not that good on analyzing instruction, algorithm, pseudocode etc. I struggled at school but manage to graduate with not so good grades (average, just passing). So theres that my opportunity getting hired is not so good but still manage to get a job (Im thankful they still haven't fired me at the office, even tho I'm the dumbest, cringiest, lowest confidence employee, slow on getting instruction and full of typos on my email and bad at presentation/report)

I wanna conquer my fear but anxiety is messing up with me. Then depression sets in reminding me I'm a failure at everything I do, anxiety letting me think I'm hated by everyone and everything would go south. I wanna have growth mindset but everytime I try I bury myself deeper into this pit of hopelessness and being pathetic.",6.126945812807883,7.748616817733993,6.639950738916259,72.39298029556652,66.78325123152709,9.540886699507393,34.6896551724138,9.83838024301492,3.719937931034482,1772,84,290,40,29,577,208,406,0.22399999999999998,0.654,0.122,-0.9932,5,1,2,0,0,1,42.0,0,0,3,13,24,39,4,7,21,0,21,4,1,0,0,42,50,32,0,4,16,1,2,1,3,3,1,0,1,4,12,11,0,1,7,2,0,5,5,20,0,1,2,4,43,19,50,42,11,54,0,3,2,2,17,27,0,7,22,205,55,22,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22139546344387384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356976104047655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008994602133644,0.0,0.0,0.0740537529301153,0.05406555540583458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09307632664363144,0.07844048265082214,0.09682821911766112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639993078937649,0.0,0.0958440745502043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638991580310889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891454060566726,0.11715988569727183,0.0,0.14945293911979693,0.08474859207142971,0.23913078186770384,0.0,0.0,0.09980266943172912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20556865156275853,0.0,0.2780260956384009,0.0,0.050405460834845664,0.2231708327613452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07842965887289327,0.0,0.0,0.2626936785512334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233815916398377,0.0,0.0,0.09580211078942484,0.0,0.08801269388537611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04874256516856143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069313523484683,0.0,0.04333021914559548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600952020634905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891025989667737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09408773567504243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569766012382615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09445362317126564,0.0,0.0,0.09437407940522984,0.1040604429924334,0.09848148806298286,0.19208864601634767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943343976625457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879572989797747,0.17952119954303086,0.0,0.0,0.1850492924229075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365582011127338,0.0,0.0,0.12555269376352382,0.0,0.14165839829161014,0.0,0.0,0.09271968174829437,0.2030612475133137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13337003960555774,0.0,0.0,0.08165527785125866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704899227823041,0.0,0.0,0.15515029605552566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060215751421744075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317983045186874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300394377493902,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HelloImNotMarc,2020/04/09,"finding out how people treat mental health - Please help me with my high school assignment! I'm currently conducting a survey for a high school assignment about mental health, and how people respond/treat it. A very easy survey and the majority of it are multiple-choice questions. Thank you!

Link to survey: [https://surveyhero.com/c/0d2591d0](https://surveyhero.com/c/0d2591d0)",11.619444444444447,15.976536129629624,7.633111111111113,59.573000000000036,58.074074074074076,9.505185185185187,29.31851851851852,9.888512548439397,3.60038962962963,317,10,37,7,5,87,40,54,0.0,0.755,0.245,0.9182,1,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,1,2,0,2,0,9,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,6,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,20,5,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18525999711920416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4309116347941577,0.0,0.0,0.13586250800079486,0.4283178079907296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4085387398937961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28104704899718586,0.0,0.0,0.2224987693752136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22706532729854825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4102772955006455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866147655287808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16724499947312238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kees-de-boer,2020/04/09,"I don’t know myself. Let’s start by introducing myself, I am 20(M) and study business administration.
I am a Moroccan but I am born and raised in the Netherlands.

I have 2 identities: 1.Morocco and 2.The Netherlands.
I honestly don’t know who I am.
When I am in the Netherlands I am seen as a moroccan but when I’m in Morocco they see me as a Dutch guy.

I was raised with all the culture and Amazigh language of morocco because my parents didn’t want me to forget my roots. 
In school I learned more about the dutch culture.

For my education i have to do a lot of self-reflections and I basically make everything up because I don’t know myself.
I have never actually have had goals in life and still pretty much don’t. 
So I also make goals up for school that I really don’t care about.

I sometimes feel like I am a stranger to myself and I really want to know who I am and be able to have goals.

Any tips ?

Thanks for reading !",1.7560918253079552,3.977776893617026,3.772138857782757,85.64184210526318,80.59574468085106,7.362150055991043,25.32026875699888,8.371475516178862,1.7830702127659572,728,29,152,16,19,247,92,188,0.013999999999999999,0.8490000000000001,0.13699999999999998,0.9681,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,1,3,7,4,0,0,9,0,24,1,0,3,2,26,39,16,0,2,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,9,0,0,6,1,0,0,7,0,0,0,4,3,31,4,23,33,4,13,0,0,2,0,7,7,0,1,7,110,34,7,0.1728332422540343,0.0,0.1686603129450114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13821468138762066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175325314371571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21071508059580504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17621500920976302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533137378613188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08738968034151864,0.1234721027999968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17113208263513274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3799385198521907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17673370001517325,0.12207723029023672,0.08443759202104423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469366419891487,0.0,0.0,0.2307350625533773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705231950444668,0.0,0.13329965125772333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19191086208786828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758335420445373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17288001338395265,0.0,0.22144280127206736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34983293657502196,0.13772571728115696,0.0,0.1803027652004925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17093649592380114,0.0,0.1223322584352214,0.0,0.13802485052187224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912162858909618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2038830484726556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IntekhabIntu,2020/04/09,"how are you guys dealing with loneliness in quarantine? Being an introvert played out well for me as of now. But as day goes by, I'm getting more and more desolated. I know many people, my classmates, people I met in college, school, University. But I don't have someone with whom I can share how I feel. I feel like I have no one to take to. No one ever listens. People I thought I could count on, now I feel like they are ignoring me. Idk how to deal with people",1.7804137115839254,3.8223980106382953,3.5471631205673795,88.23388888888887,79.53191489361703,6.73096926713948,24.274231678487002,7.793537801064563,1.2563111111111107,359,13,76,6,9,120,62,94,0.11900000000000001,0.758,0.12300000000000001,0.1027,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,0,7,6,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,3,1,18,18,8,0,1,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,5,0,1,5,1,0,0,3,1,1,2,2,4,15,5,15,14,2,8,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,6,56,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287507901814498,0.0,0.0,0.12348381577520742,0.3947991391225529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17319768874083832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904424965839437,0.2735757483458275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10003639215541213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1895877145978583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522818772101188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18708742219361835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1941228946219775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594932186813448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5309712330831587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19378022494392255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16223388784632795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14396336667386173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200764609030634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721566238048873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon8962,2020/04/09,"Should I quit my job or wait it out? So I just recently started my first job out of college as a mortgage underwriter which is apparently ridiculously stressful and I'm sort of at the point where even thinking about my job is causing panic attacks.  I literally think about how it'd be easier if I were dead because I wouldn't have to work (I would never do it as too many people count on me). At the same time though I know I would and already do to some extent feel like a failure for wanting to quit after going through all the training. Part of me wonders if it is just me struggling with being so isolated in a really difficult point in my life due to everything being remote and covid-19, but the other part of me is screaming to run from this job despite all fears I have of how it'd look on my resume and the current state of the job market.  Basically I'm just struggling with whether this stress is something I can wait out, or if it is something too dangerous to try to endure. Has anyone else ever been in a similar situation?  What's the next best corse of action for me?",8.122777777777777,6.239932388888893,8.403444444444446,73.286,63.074074074074076,11.232592592592594,37.8037037037037,9.888512548439397,3.579251481481481,860,35,166,14,10,285,126,216,0.153,0.792,0.055,-0.9599,8,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,5,15,13,3,6,11,0,23,1,0,3,4,41,36,18,1,8,10,0,1,1,0,4,1,1,0,0,11,9,0,2,5,0,0,3,2,11,0,1,2,3,20,2,35,25,8,27,0,0,1,0,0,13,0,8,11,131,31,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431017585413988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07876629511985818,0.1154214728797113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12815367855972445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866934465239659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821741782348955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572081181316315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941031814852045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07440312515048284,0.10189681660814642,0.0,0.0,0.10124100858552867,0.0,0.0,0.12676063073786564,0.05695835401497105,0.08047595224940837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581856764660192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402061231867713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5589301695723027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06190854753414104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956681009548154,0.055034258504106065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459618225335834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420767295767108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688129647274148,0.0,0.11980272152757974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216848270382012,0.0,0.24397421497098495,0.0,0.07809613216408749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21297806753841736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396306194226764,0.0,0.0,0.07216537135523128,0.0,0.11122658444981673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662138415230742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734442956690616,0.0,0.0,0.07973303090449528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580764435016265,0.23552887727653105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14436093589739998,0.11067636110321093,0.0,0.06568611674466403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764807862759244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644287292946982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12216225214309015,0.08200928795535295,0.0,0.0,0.16004420918515555,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BWOB_gaming,2020/04/09,"Nobody listen to what i say Idk why but always when i try to speak in a group online or irl nobody listen i just feel like im unwanted 
I just wanna know why.",-2.6902142857142834,-1.9001344857142843,0.9505357142857171,96.04008928571429,122.42857142857142,2.8928571428571432,7.232142857142858,5.148860815047168,-1.7426428571428567,123,1,27,1,8,44,26,35,0.10800000000000001,0.7929999999999999,0.099,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,4,3,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,1,4,4,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,15,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035064965236469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18443176619166746,0.2605820035707755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3939994418084337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20046054633322666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17820152412222465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900688833661259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24764561294886894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6582717287801861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gachanronpa,2020/04/09,Is this anxiety or what? Does anyone else start freaking out when their parents become near or if they hear them and after they leave start like trying to scream and him myself? I really don't know what's happening,5.39211382113821,6.987787073170736,5.281463414634152,81.5389430894309,68.51219512195122,8.393495934959349,23.422764227642283,8.841846274778883,1.6188471544715446,174,4,31,3,3,54,36,41,0.198,0.746,0.055999999999999994,-0.644,1,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,7,6,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,7,1,4,7,0,6,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,3,5,22,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21525920957474284,0.0,0.0,0.19675135018654288,0.28831279413416605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3107682817363605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462424299349569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23506155755947666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488283518897224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3171420154371594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464216384552415,0.0,0.0,0.2979467156594282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374707881171902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31244540290648604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18026281710024636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3983323440832935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19104234800200465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LeendertRoosenbrand,2020/04/09,I just finished a short (17 minute) documentary about sadness... In the documentary people (including myself) talk honestly and openly about their sadness. I'm hoping this film makes it a little bit easier to talk to each other about our sadness. You can watch the film here: [http://vimeo.com/leendertroosenbrand/oververdriet](http://vimeo.com/leendertroosenbrand/oververdriet). Please leave a comment if you've watched the film: I'm curious to hear your thoughts and feelings about it!,11.721333333333336,15.766279228571436,6.828571428571433,66.88476190476193,56.714285714285715,8.666666666666666,31.666666666666664,9.2995712137729,3.222238095238096,406,14,51,7,6,106,49,70,0.09300000000000001,0.731,0.17600000000000002,0.7362,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,1,2,1,0,6,5,0,0,6,0,1,0,0,1,0,10,8,3,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,6,2,8,7,2,5,0,3,2,0,8,4,0,2,1,31,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32657611019765265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1512507943611852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371449915830997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971068817663856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167389940583706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998101714232409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199673813668796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2073813794417167,0.0,0.0,0.32835855691605714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4808640627176749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374784422790671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alienpizzacookies,2020/04/09,"I don’t know what to do anymore I’ve been feeling really depressed lately and after a while I started having suicidal thoughts. It’s not as bad in the day, because I’m talking to my family, but at night when I’m alone with my thoughts everything just hurts and I feel like I have no reason left to live.

I’ve been wanting to talk to someone for a while but I don’t know who to talk to and I never had a good chance... that’s why I came here instead. I don’t know what started this, I just know it’s been getting a lot worse recently. I completely stopped talking to my friends on Saturday(?) and only texted some of them yesterday, which is unusual since I’m usually texting every day. I know how I want to kill myself and the other night I even started researching how easy it would be, I think the only thing that’s stopping me anymore is because I’m scared. I really don’t know what to do.",3.6088440748440784,4.495306616216219,5.012972972972975,84.46860706860708,72.02702702702703,8.286902286902286,30.44698544698545,8.617729084823388,2.282114345114345,704,30,146,12,13,236,102,185,0.196,0.7190000000000001,0.085,-0.9718,0,1,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,1,0,8,8,1,1,7,0,16,0,0,3,1,34,38,13,2,3,5,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,13,7,0,2,12,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,7,2,21,3,18,29,2,24,0,2,0,0,7,4,0,2,20,97,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953506334296428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289212013852815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636664823256223,0.1407117439195543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200393654868262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101036146803502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886616758824125,0.0,0.09940671273824904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07623047479181021,0.0,0.09724205892084543,0.0,0.10372749984987024,0.0,0.1088029272370121,0.0,0.11671451598678112,0.0824524512496991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08916929099454379,0.0,0.0602995389559405,0.0,0.0,0.0968045700388113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12355407292509844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768952330240174,0.0,0.38057417314022296,0.0,0.1301930716291169,0.0,0.12539866248541004,0.0,0.0,0.0563859064669409,0.0,0.10191350040472784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09812164882321164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901511149229098,0.0,0.0,0.2166181925376091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17555651479905335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14787552299208445,0.11866577353095148,0.11395832265018616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555048230583552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547242530456296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779069825874444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450738510034336,0.0,0.0,0.19298410397843035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262452041822829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3710646054625508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766765531274161,0.07395322886364987,0.0,0.18325312977667896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271132430830708,0.0,0.13614943565075585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041440254556216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761767697690215,0.08198745704020356,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deepdishpizza_,2020/04/09,"Anyone else quarantined completely alone? man, i feel as invisible and lonely as i’ve ever felt. i’m quarantined all alone for weeks. i haven’t really talked to many friends virtually either bc 1. i tend to get self conscious on video chat and 2. i’m a college freshman, and i don’t really have friends close enough i could reach out to like on campus. i keep binging sad movies about death and loss and spiraling down a depression hole, reflecting and recollecting memories of broken friendships and familial relationships. i think isolation really emphasizes how i don’t really have anyone in my life that either cares for me or even really thinks of me. i feel quite invisible and hopeless. and that when the dust settles, and when cycles of good and bad always resolve to this feeling of invisibility, my default has become depression. i don’t know how people living alone find sanity and joy. i don’t know if i have the energy and optimism for that.",5.94548076923077,7.738120034090913,6.920681818181822,69.5582342657343,67.4090909090909,11.097202797202797,30.58391608391609,11.051253699011982,3.9698239510489497,770,30,128,25,13,257,107,176,0.19399999999999998,0.647,0.159,-0.8335,0,8,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,3,7,14,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,2,2,38,24,21,1,2,4,0,4,1,2,0,1,0,0,2,4,15,0,1,13,2,0,0,5,7,0,0,1,4,16,7,19,22,4,10,0,6,0,0,7,6,0,2,5,78,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4230907323825465,0.0,0.0,0.1133036982808147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904253676708527,0.1395214563334787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369560985629068,0.0,0.15038820382675366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13883359370868792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14277083512166286,0.0,0.0,0.10872004097415423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2345646971410457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375190940521485,0.0,0.0,0.14069920328557936,0.0,0.08993848473564381,0.12317285418572235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283682206784666,0.0,0.2065537452673637,0.0,0.13074380417598627,0.0,0.1244561990154648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21040800123319076,0.0,0.07114279661469272,0.0,0.0,0.11421228017474667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103345821427047,0.0,0.0,0.1496700829741717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096180346198669,0.06652540210371657,0.0,0.12023991488363894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805421519891956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440259097110017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14483272553101484,0.0,0.0,0.43616744168658206,0.0,0.0,0.14619478101982625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205419254951446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944766002532078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745034741937491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092267336730103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GuitarGuru666,2020/04/09,"I was a foster child for 6 months I am American. I know 6 months was nothing, but it was 6 months of Hell for me. Again, I am not saying I had it worse. I need to vent. Lately, I have been having PTSD flashbacks to that Hellhole, especially one incident that happened May 12, 2017, Mother's Day. I was on R&R from that Hole. I will NEVER forget the call my mom got that day. These sacks of shit, claimed I raped their daughter and ejaculated on underwear, because I was the rebellious type to fight back against rules. I cursed and fought back against their rules, but they were too much for me to handle. For a long time in that Hellhole, I wanted to blow my brains, hang myself, give myself the most gruesome death. I want to reiterate, I AM NOT SAYING OTHERS HAVE HAD IT WORSE. That's my story, why am I still having flashbacks about this almost 3 years later? Please, you're my only hope. I need help, but unfortunately, my health insurance doesn't cover mental health. If there's a subreddit you can recommend, please share.",3.9781060606060574,5.802848161616164,4.433219696969697,85.31982954545455,72.43434343434343,7.1722222222222225,24.49621212121212,7.865858978985527,1.2483424242424244,808,24,157,11,16,255,122,198,0.20600000000000002,0.69,0.10400000000000001,-0.9823,0,0,0,0,1,1,35.0,0,1,3,0,7,7,5,0,6,0,21,5,2,0,1,19,31,6,1,6,6,3,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,1,12,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,5,0,1,11,2,30,2,19,18,2,19,1,0,0,1,16,3,2,5,15,106,42,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409708080993154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15253504275576862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21650221999028946,0.0,0.08581816533390565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15715700945302347,0.14375209335745695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18158287328193976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13504897884439146,0.0,0.0,0.11259460551422115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449126586627872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29928505788500515,0.0,0.0,0.09436184889935384,0.0,0.0,0.13982627903260714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736899186617549,0.0,0.15880594234954834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458584669349645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187310175065102,0.0,0.0,0.16487980379971234,0.33710769581678784,0.0,0.10348947906774432,0.20877313345849668,0.10857819457669143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508218168320452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539615363667314,0.10706951383590768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30906827151981103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456425569188313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239077712626642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445086200059034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11242706890063438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208993482420064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660713520184126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270320293976117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28693364086978684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065768745110744
mentalhealth,donut-underwear,2020/04/09,"I don’t know how to move forward anymore I’m not sure how to move forward

I’ve struggled with just an extremely awful past year and counting.  Looking back at my deepest point, I’m surprised I even survived it.  Every time I try to rewrite my story so that something good will happen it never does.  I’ve always tried to be extremely hopeful and not fail myself but nothing, and I mean nothing, that I work towards has ever worked out.  I always try my hardest and work as hard as I can but nothing can go my way.  I know this sounds like I pity myself which is a fair observation and I truly used to feel that way.  But in these situations I could have never handled the situation any better just for it to fail miserably.  Like I said, I’ve always felt some sort of hope.  But the more I think of it, hope has only failed me and hope is the thing that leads people to their breaking point.  I continue to hope for that bright future but it never comes and I’m left with the failed vision I had.  I want the pain to stop and right now the only way it could possibly stop it is if I make it.",3.154411764705884,4.472932220720722,4.385824059353471,86.87759141494436,73.63963963963964,6.664970853206147,25.22098569157393,7.048011613610866,1.005462321144674,851,27,175,8,17,280,122,222,0.13,0.664,0.207,0.9548,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,10,9,20,0,2,8,1,14,1,0,5,5,50,36,19,0,9,10,0,3,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,17,12,0,2,6,0,0,7,6,8,0,0,3,7,25,12,21,29,2,32,0,6,2,0,2,10,0,8,17,115,42,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24200782017502906,0.0,0.0,0.0659285946442239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614728428581916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454774029586292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08574344715340157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351291586671264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15481165825252424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484065904111067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403385170703885,0.08769585458821334,0.08168365207786328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04902029030494304,0.0,0.09308617320857847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05509830920565025,0.081316159965658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08573161566028119,0.0,0.08684719557099832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4814607968605211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656118930976456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10533529247694566,0.0,0.0,0.0947286969661892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141268117719996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471416136146488,0.0,0.0,0.10560580267659664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060827322947776,0.0,0.0,0.22431896683904415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27907532955097913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746805481073674,0.10316049336609273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09254872048976116,0.06721217873273745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832961446985432,0.10929534795707332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08279385364151437,0.09222063032758096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179493111169736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07463602023330076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16210728753454126,0.0,0.10135206800619764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09137321602679983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440855898873846,0.06212095757299964,0.0,0.0,0.05653169877383521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974658719076061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08373274494720524,0.0,0.0,0.0571829887998688,0.2308606361275985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21173991977804066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06243193016895431
mentalhealth,igotbestbutt,2020/04/09,"I don't know what's wrong with me. lately I've been having quiet emotional outbursts. I was afraid that I'd get laughed at by my family and tell me that I was just having my dramas. Today I've been feeling numbness in the back of my brain, like something was lightly tugging on it, and I feel a little unresponsive and quiet (which I am normally not) and my thiught process is kinda slow and confused. I'm aware of my surroundings, I just feel like I'm kind of a different person. The way I talk is different compared to when I talk usually. My voice was high pitched, now I just don't feel like talking at all.",4.666209677419354,5.193307233870968,5.775967741935487,81.25895161290326,69.40322580645162,8.780645161290323,31.62903225806452,8.841846274778883,2.525309677419354,483,20,96,8,8,161,76,124,0.036000000000000004,0.826,0.139,0.8755,2,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,0,2,4,0,13,2,1,0,1,19,21,6,0,1,4,0,4,3,0,0,1,3,0,1,5,6,0,0,5,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,6,8,17,5,10,15,1,15,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,2,10,62,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13087302960289934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18999910440984089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3556448305675597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19145170465996714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16044908821769818,0.0,0.3442322398377277,0.2431813363901501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892229548523603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798252810865487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723675060954447,0.09353727978680876,0.0,0.191992625250318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494528642940267,0.17058476828343874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16675952599069518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486117746405351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102801032826794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4104001091347004,0.1487620011255357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16132937288653032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874508753670314,0.0,0.0,0.13509656472555334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18608660535635907,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,therealslothshady_,2020/04/09,"Dealing with insecurities and just life itself I guess. 19f. I’ve struggled with depression and anxiety throughout my life. Not particularly diagnosed but I know it’s not just a phase and it’s very real. I don’t feel comfortable admitting it to my doctors. I’ve been on and off several birth controls over the last like 5 months and have had all sorts of emotional changes such as being SUPER suicidal and I mean nothing like I’ve ever dealt with before. I would get this overwhelming sense of being worthless and hating myself and I would get so tired of all the bad thoughts I would just want to end my life. And I’ve never ever felt so strongly about it before and it’s never felt so real. Lately I’ve been feeling extremely insecure about myself, and I feel like part of it is my own fault, I follow some “social media influencers” and models on Instagram and I always find myself looking at them wishing I could be that attractive and then I start to really hate myself, I try so hard to do little trends I see on social media and it just makes me feel worse because I’m not as cute as the girl I saw doing it. And I don’t look as good in clothes as other girls do. And I notice that when I look in mirrors I look good but when I see pictures of myself I look horrible and not at all how I do when I look in the mirror or in photos I take of myself. It’s gotten to the point where every time my boyfriend tries to compliment me I reject it and say something sarcastic and I can tell it’s starting to maybe hurt his feelings.. I just don’t believe what he says and I have severe issues with trusting people I care about. I’m just struggling so hard right now while I look at all the girls I went to school with flourish and break out of their shell. I just want to feel better about myself and learn how to love myself. I’m tired of looking at everybody else wishing I could look like them and be like them. I want to be me and be comfortable in my own skin.",2.995078605604924,4.696809451127823,4.267309182046026,86.00332877648668,74.78947368421052,7.04187742082479,24.120984278879014,7.793537801064563,1.216825563909774,1557,48,312,22,33,512,185,399,0.18100000000000002,0.644,0.174,-0.7476,0,0,1,0,0,1,21.0,0,0,4,4,26,31,2,5,7,0,25,9,1,5,8,87,71,45,1,10,14,0,11,5,0,3,7,2,0,3,17,31,0,1,14,0,0,2,9,13,0,0,9,25,56,18,48,51,8,40,0,5,12,1,17,19,0,4,23,219,73,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060454437672644364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055580561156945436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066354641553887,0.04428956264969984,0.0,0.12364740669729668,0.08185684106087225,0.0,0.06425707910625418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407619490874358,0.0,0.0768589207277866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148829868214218,0.11601755354092028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490369024702764,0.06257729040922744,0.0737428777200142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07436504972582662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06069358566070983,0.0817266327557956,0.0643504001768343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13144046927536746,0.061214624178388626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22041805711175966,0.05190445237225708,0.139519596987064,0.0,0.0664049774236596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591804731988719,0.0,0.0,0.12187844312305128,0.0,0.0,0.08003722012255175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301684805365462,0.14346272836795698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777823941362268,0.0,0.0,0.07583251389207646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039929061627786575,0.05922318651317522,0.08195754017193048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539542530250845,0.17747680950180103,0.07281898448485448,0.0,0.0,0.5491040005385702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655736025319933,0.0,0.048497501837766716,0.0,0.07299129935071617,0.07914214604095644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05799219918643024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120713949636429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697140369435598,0.0827177302889483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867783895103518,0.0,0.05036954343585507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868206994695364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539365511416282,0.04654438966842277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062046621398791774,0.0,0.11555568945697835,0.0,0.07353032216563794,0.1157926004489322,0.0,0.0,0.16415800886199305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812440625243764,0.0,0.05593305162698877,0.0,0.0,0.10285058304752152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15190870130997128,0.0,0.0794723272430192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054627208398804736,0.0,0.06350331252258694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057679627484667366,0.04236547468895588,0.16701152257355534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986553925164812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994764432111398,0.1285606757192096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06735153121509845,0.0,0.0,0.16709838177867742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740412324952609,0.15483520482047214,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QuickConstant,2020/04/09,"why am i so easily traumatized? There are people out there who actually get bullied really really hard, on a daily basis, physically and emotionally, and it's usually personal, and it's only normal for PTSD or CPTSD to occur in the victims. I keep thinking that I got bullied when it wasn't the case at all, the school I went to and the environment I was in was in fact very safe and fine, I got remarks here and there but it wasn't personal, and it's also usually because I'm acting a bit dislikable, for some odd reason, these small remarks have changed me, my mental health is in shambles and I just don't know why it is so easily for me to be affected by something so small, I can only imagine the horrors if I was actually bullied hard everyday, like how you see them in hollywood shows and movies. It could be due to my overly sensitivity, but it's gotten even worse than before, I'm overly anxious and scared of other people, scared they might think bad of me, and maybe talk shit about me, it's like I was born so vulnerable to these little things.",9.043646996278575,6.472639861244023,9.726953748006377,66.68645401382244,61.87081339712918,13.11664008506114,37.57628920786816,11.645159339076185,4.249095268474217,837,30,158,20,9,288,122,209,0.235,0.695,0.069,-0.9906,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,2,0,14,9,2,2,7,0,17,2,1,3,2,32,29,22,0,3,5,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,15,12,0,2,5,1,0,2,3,5,0,0,10,3,19,4,23,15,3,21,0,0,1,0,7,13,1,4,8,111,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.25499168946379674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448099644882168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759764909273532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908754191931007,0.07964320926841617,0.0,0.11117378111156967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426362877508462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382106921236262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431363218182302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14696400068012272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629328991822924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825938853550945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20898595756674787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340740101120453,0.0,0.0,0.1388751577437196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612798825985425,0.0,0.0,0.07180198721458463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276582728191701,0.1309459220880367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312557853628319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13166477153552267,0.13859932013479626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800955277280462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987308785621807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811529330440824,0.2281576023377424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527232072973671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16739585332789578,0.1343302665586633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616074817070387,0.13222507709390652,0.10411137249456344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411065383931114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058098272459648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501176092967658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679825289066,0.16743087160741935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877856911627744,0.10780017900780554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111413557046502,0.2357831459514643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331438158636115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lexmears,2020/04/09,"Serious Daddy and stepmom issues paired with guilt. Plz read :( My parents divorced when I was 4 (20 now) and My dad and I used to be really close. We played video games and talk all night and go out to our favorite pizza shop. He got into Christianity and have completely changed. A year or so later he found my stepmom and it got so bad. I didn’t like her. She was so controlling... and a practicing psychologist which is scary!! She took my phone away so many times, for months at a time, for various stupid reasons like drawing a penis on Snapchat and only sending it to my bff. She has convinced my dad to take away my car because I couldn’t go to my dads birthday dinner (she asked me 2 days before and I already told my mom I would watch my half brother). She was a terrible MANIPULATIVE person. I remember her son/my half brother made her a bracelet and he did something bad and she threw his bracelet away and when he cried about it she spanked him and put him in time out and then he literally COULD NOT stop crying and she spanked him again. She always told him to shut up when he was like 3-6ish. She was such a drama queen and everyone in my home town knew her as a bitch and was soo stuck up. My dad just let her take over and I don’t understand why he’s so weak.. I was never allowed to have friends over (1time every few months) and when I asked to go to football games my dad would get mad and complain about him having to drive me. We had a huge fight a few years ago and I told him how they have ruined my childhood and they brag about money and are super stuck up and judgemental (my dad thinks gay people need to die, which I’m bi so pops, pro choice people are legit murders, poor people deserve to be poor, and that global warming is fake and made up by stupid hippies, pretty much thinks everyone is going to hell but him) Now that I am in college, she is super nice to me and dad doesn’t seem that interested in having a strong relationship with me. He tells me he loves me on occasion though.

I can leave more examples in a comment to further explain the situation, but so many questions. 

Why do I feel guilty when I get hostile at my dad (If my stepmom died I wouldn’t give a single fuck)? 
I want to knock on their door and tell them I’m an atheist and they are stupid and my stepmom should loose her liscense and that I turned out to be everything they didn’t want me to be. I want to remind them of all the terrible things they put me through and I truely never be able to forgive them (they made me hate my mom too, explanation below). Is this the only way I will get over my problem?

But if I do this, I think I might feel extremely guilty for hurting my dads feelings.. but he has hurt me so bad before and now? 

When my brothers (stepmom/ dads kids) get older, should I tell them about why I don’t come around as much and why there’s clearly something wrong between them and me? 
I’m afraid they will be emotionally abusive towards my brothers and I want them to know I will always accept them and how to deal with them until they can grow up.

Did my stepmom actually see what she did wrong? Or is she still manipulative? (We aren’t close at all so I can’t tell)... like do manipulative EXTREME controlling people change on their own (she has been in psych as long as I can remember so I don’t think her career has to do with her attitude towards me and my mom.

I can’t afford therapy right now with being laid off. I’m also a upper level biology major and my homework is CRAZY. I’m doing like 12 hours a day so I don’t really have time to find a therapist anyways.... And yet I still can’t shake this for years and years and it seems like it gets worse over time. Please help and comfort if you have any input. It eats away at me a lot.",2.7297005442768167,4.330099328552805,3.850402930402929,89.14140228885992,75.27118644067797,6.747285859150266,24.299766147223767,7.447530270364453,0.9512585790856978,2943,93,631,36,63,955,330,767,0.151,0.745,0.10400000000000001,-0.9922,4,0,2,0,2,0,81.0,4,1,18,6,39,48,11,3,21,0,72,8,0,13,6,126,129,80,3,16,11,18,4,6,1,9,1,0,3,2,17,60,3,3,21,7,4,14,16,29,0,2,28,6,126,19,82,82,13,100,2,3,2,4,110,46,3,10,45,423,143,6,0.060991758014418036,0.07226525980100862,0.059519157655205275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406551344768412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730592162505103,0.04877508684841487,0.10150005723171987,0.0,0.0,0.041476486946305256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542955956364448,0.11403812092271115,0.0,0.2292150575217827,0.0,0.1527767109438145,0.037180009580558414,0.0,0.10379898763005392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904238552149494,0.05253899895008706,0.06394869786136084,0.0,0.13681488569524108,0.048696955829993935,0.0,0.1339931644530401,0.0786692763941029,0.06287982437375776,0.0,0.0,0.12659963092446214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062409795057830425,0.0,0.06860751850002413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051388186680100256,0.11656047705428925,0.05481545933209925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925177963481068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05574536186631685,0.0,0.0,0.06687431455533407,0.04712208094534204,0.05638589747623436,0.15932838110277786,0.058508851916638724,0.13865208654083513,0.0,0.09756136117452036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602167338765744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0408814897459835,0.0,0.061179706252440964,0.0,0.06006459579014346,0.0,0.13058587683195627,0.0,0.0,0.06365954921084188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03351947513245253,0.0,0.0,0.06458146522263089,0.0,0.06236820488777577,0.0,0.178784952918887,0.0,0.0,0.05397578654406509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05185301157795148,0.05504744288523164,0.17313562845676758,0.0,0.12367213918332615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06470261680570125,0.0,0.2142984295129852,0.09736607870359004,0.0,0.08967191988443826,0.045224615743931336,0.0940812076066646,0.0,0.0,0.057236633201532876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277396072768283,0.0,0.0,0.06772412938708497,0.0,0.0,0.1691360217146905,0.05325565053641386,0.0,0.06695063481864713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620505448334728,0.0,0.058360875302955535,0.0,0.12262712568218292,0.06832472759570785,0.0,0.06100826325033701,0.0,0.0781457639345161,0.06270968540177448,0.0,0.06548232257924327,0.13818354439537125,0.052086628091009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04860253450796096,0.11104921161219304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855729146269132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09390887021438693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741619347315984,0.05099184073019232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171642301780487,0.04902286476525769,0.2132379393006247,0.0,0.06974939077390517,0.07081613199407763,0.04052021388508077,0.15632422318556052,0.05992409257709599,0.0,0.17782392290466198,0.0,0.0,0.17484071558143388,0.06776408733183582,0.0,0.06634151849547999,0.0,0.06349457108288344,0.0,0.0526772961189661,0.0,0.0,0.1438980764754566,0.04841241857919167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201422997876634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215581208835464,0.08665358990883139,0.13336982548437634,0.0,0.1571067698717974
mentalhealth,realknuckles,2020/04/09,"I believe loneliness is slowly destroying my mental health, and I need a solution. I've been in homeschool since November 2019 because my parents discovered my weed use, I've had no contact with friends from November 2019 to June 2020 and when I finally got access to my contacts I messaged my best friend and talked about the situation. But about a month ago he has gone completely silent, I tried asking another friend about this he gave me no answer in fact he just stopped answering me, actually all my friends stopped texting me and I have no idea why so once again I'm just alone in my head. I do have my family but I feel like I can't be myself around them or have any real conversation. Aldo rarely leave the house so most of my time is spent in my room. Please someone give me some advice as I fear the worst will come  and I will feel compelled to end my own life but I currently have no urge to do that. Please give me advice. And sorry for the frantic text.",4.904111961337094,5.889513434554974,5.3379057591623065,82.9610511478051,69.10471204188482,9.01828433346758,29.87555376560612,9.265573868473778,2.433909867096254,770,29,154,15,13,246,121,191,0.154,0.728,0.11800000000000001,-0.8035,2,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,10,10,1,2,6,0,15,3,1,2,2,30,28,14,0,1,6,1,2,1,4,2,2,0,1,0,2,9,0,2,5,0,1,2,5,4,0,0,6,2,30,6,17,19,6,19,0,0,0,0,18,6,0,3,12,96,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.12490420227707325,0.0,0.0,0.25014955559804897,0.1134594321210588,0.0,0.0,0.13256373665109825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704067260653893,0.13421342951382587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139422721574013,0.119657611802424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07802428025302285,0.0,0.0,0.14420600984651924,0.13432236736406272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025595809524533,0.13419983426684648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336516681149747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206618559420776,0.14402943595582998,0.12943576493735734,0.09143932104960874,0.0,0.14021175626471194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.395553039524502,0.0,0.0,0.2455680410374907,0.0,0.0,0.1023689217945709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135931886174004,0.1360522049213276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476885079835401,0.0,0.14449024994692028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552773112560673,0.0,0.0,0.09040632499340788,0.06253166432238283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12898838618011085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216401633042144,0.0,0.0,0.09490632554825644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363100019949658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421227834742945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809991257742682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568580187579144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587840163018293,0.14387121958328608,0.0,0.0,0.10844935375744064,0.0,0.0,0.1432794023501988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21401832418195288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287715851613448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07463464239482262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689988717048296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054618225560862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549515914567746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ihopeurhavngagoodday,2020/04/09,"hopeless romantic/anxiety hello! (please be kind this is my first post on here hehe)

i've finally resorted to coming onto this platform because my ongoing struggles with anxiety made me feel alone as i haven't come across anyone struggling with the same issues as i, and i fear burdening/ my friends and family to talk to them about this. i am making this post in hopes of gaining some clarity, and reaching some people that can relate to me :)

to start, i've never sought out for mental health help simply because i didn't have them (ah the good times.) i was basically once full of life. fast forward, i go into college and i am suddenly being approached by guys who want to pursue a relationship with me. growing up, i was never really interested in romantic relationships and i always made the excuse that i would put more effort into it in college/hoped i would be mature by college. i don't know, i have this weird inner-conflict with myself. for instance, if i find someone i like, then i become invested in it, but once they show me any hint that they like me back, im out that door. im not sure why this happens. i want to find a partner and i want to get married one day but it seems impossible for me.

anyway, now that i was in college, i didn't put myself out there but there were some guys that would ask for my number and well you know where im going. no one caught my eye except for this one guy. he was literally my ideal type and we got to talking! i could actually envision myself going out with this dude (shocking realization for me). thing is, no matter how much i enjoyed talking to him and being with me, my anxiety was high ALL.THE.TIME. even when i wasn't with him, i would think about him and i would get seriously anxious. im talking i can't eat, sleep, and my hands were always so cold. it was like i was having a panic attack every single day for 6 months and i wish i was exaggerating. this had lead to me developing an eating disorder (bc i was so anxious i didn't have an appetite), and i developed pretty bad acne for the first time in my life. i fear that i won't be able to have a partner (even though i want to) because of my serious anxiety. i feel like it's from a place of low self-esteem. even when other people give me attention i don't like it because i don't really see the value in myself to deserve such attention if that makes sense... how do i overcome this?

then, over the summer i decided i needed to work on myself and get over him. so i did. except my anxiety still lingers. it's like my body is used to feeling anxious all the time that it became the new norm. this still affects my health and i don't know what to do. i feel this constant anxious feeling right in my chest for absolutely no reason! and it gets triggered really easily and i could easily feel even more anxious for the next 3 days after that one small trigger.

in all, my problems im seeking out help for are 1. my chronic anxiety that affects my health (skin, appetite, and sleep) and 2. my weird relationship with a romantic partner.

i think i do a good job at concealing my inner demons to my friends and family. if i were to bring it up once, they dismiss it and say that my feelings are inconsistent with how i act so ""it's probably not that serious."" but really, i just don't want to burden them. that's why i'm coming on here to see if there are people that can relate to me or they have heard of my experiences. i've literally never met or heard of anyone that deals with the same daily struggles as i do. i used to be able to handle it, but now i'm just sick and i'm tired of feeling this way.

thank you so much for those that stuck around and read till the very end. i tried to sum up almost 2 years of my life in this post. i hope you're having a good day :)",2.9663880232460187,4.548526486945175,4.679300934894299,83.51964288722314,74.60052219321149,7.605120862461049,25.27912069401163,8.310345600021478,1.606773418681041,2963,99,597,51,62,1003,306,766,0.11800000000000001,0.732,0.15,0.9726,1,1,0,0,0,1,93.0,1,2,7,7,34,39,1,6,21,1,60,18,7,15,6,127,116,51,0,22,17,0,10,6,5,6,9,3,1,6,49,45,2,0,20,2,1,15,20,19,2,6,26,17,108,20,96,76,13,91,1,2,3,0,42,39,0,13,41,428,157,8,0.101460213428681,0.0,0.04950526624732561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050798873925679576,0.05254109115636674,0.0,0.0,0.08442302538089826,0.0,0.0,0.03449821217523555,0.0,0.23285035669237375,0.2865529041821033,0.0,0.07094334029679868,0.0,0.0,0.045160550382961566,0.04742580171688469,0.05771282002355434,0.0,0.03900832068071925,0.04235752010850125,0.12369840877294,0.05602741720392514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056349712275716564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13109848495131818,0.0,0.054821223157618164,0.0,0.08100772453009576,0.0,0.0,0.1308668881349302,0.05230051247097435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05814109734496512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038191279075912,0.0,0.0,0.044931817055492346,0.0,0.0,0.13402702815116252,0.0,0.042742302878393465,0.0,0.0,0.049623778710902726,0.09564765949280547,0.11417094772566005,0.2052053297914158,0.03624159837307947,0.0,0.05557235223753384,0.09273279696706788,0.08630200571146203,0.0,0.0,0.07838790921205757,0.0,0.10601754780121377,0.048664940937806316,0.08649326616458315,0.12765001991513422,0.04057350062290183,0.0,0.0,0.1506923442696391,0.044860465828741064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16177119357181927,0.0,0.0,0.06800664237173484,0.053599143019832464,0.0,0.10077288505106896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2739861029075335,0.05294905131426771,0.05034180313010342,0.0,0.0,0.05282759958383823,0.08363981982988714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10749652391949396,0.14870500598375025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600410715154817,0.0677254803151136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05112401571961643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04049228718593716,0.0,0.07458493103186134,0.03761573132983535,0.11737855712992908,0.048995453184013806,0.05395204401121388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620777239975914,0.13750413286047275,0.0,0.0,0.059520849817174586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055096054387825,0.0,0.05300216416367002,0.05568642320721304,0.0,0.0,0.14575625740687098,0.05161075633105901,0.05469563524302014,0.04854186087506079,0.0,0.10199553799481252,0.0,0.0,0.05074383500168249,0.0,0.12999602151931805,0.05215899878968416,0.0,0.16339544819625956,0.0,0.04332323394945292,0.0,0.04034261701663331,0.0,0.0,0.08085065400454346,0.04618278386317545,0.052922565128226434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153348678141376,0.0,0.04298345479364207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03590703063883652,0.0,0.08102625750564528,0.0,0.0,0.1591023666746568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04781252521211362,0.0,0.0,0.16309975261879228,0.0,0.04670546645777618,0.0,0.0,0.03370282873289405,0.06501160798123895,0.049842072276019236,0.0,0.08874339955753023,0.058306794967963975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03444241244737502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762904826932012,0.0,0.041857650925901775,0.14960965655930475,0.04026719741774192,0.0,0.0,0.045612458377085656,0.0,0.09155206149270613,0.0,0.05833711911438268,0.0,0.0,0.0369321218806948,0.0,0.0,0.1801860614599986,0.0,0.0,0.03266852547215295
mentalhealth,kamirusk8,2020/04/09,"how do you stoo yourself from committing suicide i just want to fucking die

life is giving way too much to handle right now and i want it to stop pls

im just a problem for everybody

im a waste of time and money",0.26934782608695684,2.3296028913043507,2.6197391304347843,92.66656521739132,85.30434782608697,5.419130434782609,22.243478260869566,6.742157984588678,0.5660660869565213,167,6,37,2,5,57,36,46,0.304,0.556,0.141,-0.9152,0,0,0,0,0,1,0.0,0,1,0,0,5,2,1,0,2,0,2,2,0,1,1,10,6,3,2,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,6,6,1,5,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,3,22,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2729237107423779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431136372259301,0.0,0.2522669751840459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5681103816505637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1857450997877281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19331488524525567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516289586872427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245768919680088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21985660286754174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876489943745641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334125239864108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31021573059565344,0.20873515709583604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nrs0012,2020/04/09,"Trying to Find A Purpose In Quarantine Hello everyone!

I am looking for some suggestions. I'm often prone to depression, but in normal times I can more than fight it off by filling my life with purpose - whether it's growing my faith and supporting my ""other family"" that is my church, or doing schoolwork, or working to build my career, I felt purpose all the time. And now that I'm quaranting, and none of that is available anymore (except online classes anyways), I feel so empty. Just doesn't seem like I have any purpose at all right now, and it kind of drives me crazy.

Not trying to fall apart. Not sure how to avoid it. Any tips?",3.934672131147544,5.8235636147541,4.6434098360655724,83.50118032786884,72.68852459016394,7.1750819672131145,28.593442622950818,7.908726449838941,1.9622170491803284,499,20,91,7,10,160,87,122,0.155,0.772,0.073,-0.8725,0,2,0,0,1,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,1,1,2,0,7,1,0,1,3,25,14,10,0,1,8,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,4,0,0,4,4,3,0,0,1,3,11,5,16,13,5,14,2,1,1,0,3,6,0,5,5,66,19,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3175429774599542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315451670975557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20109228653625685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22309604587466644,0.0,0.0,0.22010012017538647,0.0,0.11805233391810745,0.0,0.2241732950665491,0.0,0.21339256877672602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24312902330567934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16491079836544328,0.1140644383816728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19606079367771706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287566237904861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993869802821097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2125475172569885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649454684062843,0.22004809319702126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27228312762291845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170293620981991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997309724833126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ochrerose,2020/04/09,"Perceptions of environment changing a lot? Confused Hi! So I guess I'm not entirely sure how to describe this the best I can, but I'll try. I've noticed that pretty frequently the environment will feel different somehow than it felt before, even if nothing has changed. This has happened in varying degrees of frequency since childhood. The room or place I'm at will just start feeling alien sometimes, for seemingly no reason. I know it looks the same but it feels different. Especially since being in quarantine, like the way I percieve the different areas of my house is a lot different than it used to be and changes a lot daily. It feels strange and offputting. Does anyone understand what I mean? I wish I was able to explain it better. It's kind of uncomfortable when it happens and makes me worry that something's wrong with me, or that I'm out of touch with my feelings. I wish I knew what this was, if it's anything of concern, how common it is, etc. I've wondered if it could be derealization but I really don't know, as it's difficult for me to understand what that or other forms of dissociation would feel like. Any input would be greatly appreciated.",4.3341555023923455,6.579844468181817,5.338516746411488,77.41145933014357,72.5,8.44976076555024,32.033492822966515,9.134995656068208,3.1085,933,45,165,21,19,306,129,220,0.1,0.765,0.135,0.8837,4,1,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,2,7,10,0,1,9,0,17,0,0,5,1,52,45,17,0,8,11,0,8,2,0,4,0,0,1,0,23,6,0,0,18,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,9,15,7,22,32,7,13,0,0,1,0,2,7,0,14,7,114,38,0,0.10276544399060973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988402589084575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718559878538214,0.0,0.08456720422097139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744582380341215,0.0,0.10784599334408927,0.09088768406446923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32613664059139824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08204984492621839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4294720658415664,0.0,0.0,0.08993073256028887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146106348678334,0.06787560655181257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117677774265325,0.07341565372039821,0.09867094200464628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132992647935346,0.11320772243425616,0.0,0.18175028546561112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185775248125406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701439594363488,0.11295440093739866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041201010146568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629709081367583,0.0,0.0,0.2621025166612877,0.0,0.0,0.06859673185048246,0.0,0.0,0.11194169522801156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860621510834126,0.11699913910808585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073680164603916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045494013824568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583417487996923,0.10565999198287417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355380060889923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700172744356574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07911385944931024,0.10163765181231182,0.0,0.07273791018739101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685521478207584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977099076871536,0.0,0.0,0.21396490282452166,0.0,0.08875634840056065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157042610206104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23635037791978186,0.0,0.1114447403274686,0.0,0.10436329672582392,0.0,0.1460032458525986,0.11235788061406686,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nwar5197,2020/04/09,"Improving helplines Hello,

For my uni assignment we’re coming up with ideas to improve the current helpline program. 
For us to understand the weak points, we would love to hear your experience using the service. 

Would be amazing if you could comment what made you call the helpline, and how your experience was. 

Thank you so much for your time",6.135245901639344,8.5707071147541,5.030295081967214,80.72740983606558,68.01639344262296,8.158688524590165,35.15081967213115,8.841846274778883,3.20811868852459,278,14,47,5,5,82,46,61,0.04,0.7390000000000001,0.222,0.9231,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,2,6,0,0,2,4,0,0,4,0,5,2,0,3,0,13,12,4,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,9,3,8,6,1,5,0,0,0,1,13,2,0,1,2,32,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379123644265754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007032279989501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860263123415654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558246074231362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626005535266467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630212469213726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21028568684092752,0.22046403755498625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17127699557777906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22025412200595684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21450906667807645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13586035537642446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24255440018661376,0.2802624346813506,0.20123153437653274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33102372637366145,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,themanbatman1,2020/04/09,"You’re all amazing ❤️ Hey all. I’ve suffered from PTSD, addiction to self harm, depression and panic attacks for the past couple years. I just wanted to say how amazing you all are and how much I care about you. You guys are amazing ❤️ please message me for advice or help",0.7371428571428567,3.180211285714286,2.2800000000000007,92.965,87.92857142857143,4.628571428571429,22.285714285714285,6.1826913282559595,0.4372428571428575,216,8,44,2,7,70,40,56,0.221,0.519,0.261,0.4588,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,3,0,0,4,9,1,1,1,0,2,1,0,2,3,10,4,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,6,4,6,4,4,2,0,2,0,0,9,0,0,1,2,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27464040177848364,0.0,0.24618264598718306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866062392008639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25685897213593645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787552614697232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21698655706286707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24944986832998414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16886307065645145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18519721073561468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29558505221504555,0.0,0.0,0.24049526722208184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2765429989983725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944921688220025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20034449430714124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26281747026177665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485945791492946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16223437395694856
mentalhealth,racinganon2,2020/04/09,"I can feel my mind deteriorating I have no real friends (job is so demanding I can't make friends outside of random bar encounters)

My family (at least) I think loves me, but I'm not even sure it's a healthy relationship the amount we fight.

The last girlfriend I had, I fucked it up by putting all my emotional pain on her and fucking her up in horrific ways.

My life is basically on some weird cruise control straight into death.

Everyday the idea of suicide just pops in my head but I'm too much of a pussy to actually go through with it and in fact I even been thinking about and thinking, I would just look at the gun and shoot myself emotionalessly, the other ways just see to painful.

Things that used to make me smile, just don't anymore.

And on with my job, as a truck driver I have one of the most demanding jobs in the country and it fucks me up beyond belief, I'm only home for 6 days a month and 2 of them are cut in half because I go to my truck the afternoon before so I can be ready to roll early Monday.

I literally drive in silence now because music just has become to mundane to me and I stopped playing video games for the same reason.

I have made some fake reality in my head where I'm actually successful with a girlfriend and happy life and got to the point where I talk to that fake girl while I'm driving down the highway.

And I swear once my mom dies, I just know my entire family is going to go right under and break up and I'll rarely hear from them again.

My entire life is just based on an entire lie and only recently have I gotten the balls to actually start telling the truth.

I lie to my family about having friends, girlfriends, and where I go when I go out at night.

Hell I literally had to make a fake Facebook just so I could at least pretend I had friends since my real Facebook is pointless.

I think my last post on Facebook was in 2018.",5.136309483053751,5.238020643044622,5.89143215793678,82.32839096199932,68.29133858267717,8.935798242610977,30.475978546159997,8.716276077567194,2.1470403058313363,1479,53,311,22,23,485,196,381,0.19399999999999998,0.701,0.10400000000000001,-0.9917,3,0,0,2,1,1,27.0,1,0,2,2,23,22,6,0,20,0,24,12,2,7,4,62,56,23,3,2,11,1,1,0,7,1,5,1,1,1,8,21,1,2,9,7,0,10,4,12,0,2,8,4,49,10,55,45,9,62,2,0,2,4,21,32,4,4,16,206,57,4,0.0,0.0,0.25638984882471805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685362786404055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677320727423814,0.0967227806646382,0.07452224290761852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982259305023004,0.06992373344060701,0.0,0.0,0.05648042489299247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089191198465947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851321820536474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11568859938532015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476816187118607,0.0,0.04428195849272378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27064951153758504,0.2428927474667218,0.0,0.0,0.29863483379059114,0.0,0.07004395343197369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09322817848464916,0.0,0.0,0.1797601430573135,0.0,0.09870652637804464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878476569850681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886465698023077,0.0,0.0,0.2607223084026581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04813045916901122,0.14277516395965087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855763343049094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354328067507583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904236840453968,0.08286821579804213,0.17537655057568186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08842859519041102,0.10257004095779122,0.06990375083398555,0.0,0.06437974731928649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218581664516914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326748064424746,0.059344972278201964,0.13321370072492775,0.18637787156742272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08278931255736281,0.0,0.08387530735979062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880398610410412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19936538049634644,0.0,0.09004454696277364,0.0864724952304562,0.0940257638503688,0.0,0.07479094814818943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978815430141005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244524708503526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06198800555374012,0.0,0.0,0.07321894804495625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09579588013094187,0.0,0.08254102401832229,0.0,0.0,0.07039170457200285,0.07654684247170876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05818278753497851,0.22446522839122726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563908563511879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13903033543881013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221274429976576,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayforgood0629,2020/04/09,"How do I help my friend? I don't know where to turn to ask this question, but I know that I need to go somewhere, so here I am. I'm a 17 year old male, and I feel just lost on this situation. My best friend, a 17 year old girl, is severely depressed, suffers from crippling anxiety, self harms regularly, and plans on committing suicide next year. 

I've been trying so desperately trying to lighten her mood, talk her out of cutting, try and calm her down during anxiety attacks, and usually I'm able to. But the thing is that these problems never stay solved. I don't know who to contact. I don't know who to turn to. I don't know how to get her the professional help she needs.

Her family treats her horribly. She feels like the rest of our friends don't care about her at all. She always tells me that nobody would care if she died. I try really hard to make her feel better, and manage to get her to calm down. But she always reverts to these thoughts and I feel hopeless in helping her sometimes.

I just need to know what to do. I'm not doing enough for her clearly, she isn't getting any better. I don't know what I should do. Where can I find professional help? Is it possible in a time like this? I can't drive yet, neither can she. I don't know what I can do.
I just feel helpless here. I'm the only person who seems to actively ever try and make her feel better. Her parents don't, they always make her feel awful. The rest of my friends don't try and help, they don't even realize that she isn't well. I'm trying to do this on my own, I guess. Who do I turn to? How can I help her get through these illnesses? I feel so lost. I just want to help her, but it seems like the whole world is against her and I don't know why",1.6416270661157029,3.3123839641873296,3.1370928030303027,92.77563920454548,78.50413223140495,6.410778236914601,22.363033746556482,7.292943589461545,0.5825289944903584,1341,40,308,17,32,440,150,363,0.2,0.615,0.184,-0.8773,1,0,0,0,0,2,47.0,1,0,2,7,19,28,2,0,9,1,33,1,0,6,5,62,79,20,2,8,10,1,9,3,4,2,1,0,0,4,21,10,0,0,23,0,0,2,17,10,1,0,4,9,58,17,36,73,8,26,0,6,0,0,53,12,0,5,14,199,79,3,0.07191052844232981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17950596088903392,0.0,0.0,0.048901625257877286,0.0,0.11002271486122096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06722663688578967,0.08180860744410161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754656630731833,0.19079705598039487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466351526648895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061936432775849135,0.0,0.07463177531487045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430279877685747,0.0,0.04749622583181276,0.06504718993153644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779084634229003,0.0,0.290880990800516,0.0513728958876034,0.0,0.0,0.06572492022722351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222315835710622,0.0,0.1502811324540371,0.0,0.0408684104925543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921755434388847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441770881707433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3374007798420709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35568131228205496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053955555674836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569976729551259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400250838897938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599622369949706,0.055461832678183234,0.0,0.0764776628055761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15091600589462612,0.0,0.0,0.05469119729290756,0.0,0.0,0.07984813179791839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06278949971745798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106831606328442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880866399031099,0.0,0.0,0.08055624935297198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046067725894474124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13092928864665887,0.07501836426885687,0.08123842862169399,0.0,0.0,0.08083044690221165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07112135137691529,0.0,0.0,0.07664705531926258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786584465648536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057798958839540324,0.06285297144343874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04777415978702529,0.0,0.0,0.057088927099236235,0.04193160742387358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34175769936898104,0.2346540159515724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919928763629147,0.0,0.042414692812833533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06465620117693938,0.0,0.06488806695200698,0.08028553693284014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05108317619157629,0.0,0.0,0.13892406791272233
mentalhealth,WaveOfBabies13,2020/04/09,"Honestly don’t know what’s going on with me, don’t know what else to do.. I’m 30. Have struggled with severe depression and anxiety since I can remember. Used to take meds but then started smoking weed and never touched em again but also started to really abuse substances and sex starting at 15. I’ve lost more than 40 close friends to drugs but when my cousin overdosed and never came back I gave up all “hard” drugs. Still smoke weed, and have used hallucinogenics for fun and to hopefully curve my brain function. I’m an alcoholic. Nothing works now. I’m surrounded by beautiful people who love me and really do care about me. I’m a fuckin great chef who could cook circles around anyone who challenged. I’ve got a family who is the most amazing and supportive people you could imagine, and a girlfriend of 3 years whose still Over the moon about me for some fucking reason and has shown Me love I’d never thought I’d see. I don’t even know if I really know how to love her because when I think of life without her and me dying on my own, I feel absolutely nothing... I have friends allll over the world who would drop anything to help me out if I need. People could look at my life and say that’s what I want...

And all I want to do sometimes is just fucking kill myself.

Never thought I was good enough for the love.. still don’t think I deserve it. I find ever fault possible in myself to make excuses and say I’m not good enough to be able to enjoy that happy life. I’ve never felt like I have fit in anywhere despite having built numerous, deep loving relationships with people. I’ve always hated myself.. from my thoughts to body image and everything under the sun I’ve always despised myself... I used to be ok when I was working 80 hours a week drinking and fucking till the sun came up. Nothing has ever really changed... I feel the same guilt and sadness as I did when I was 12 with a belt around my neck trying to figure out how to rig it up in the closet and failing..

I feel like I’m a phony. A narcissist who doesn’t give a flying fuck by himself. I always find myself needing to be liked and trying to show people how different I am than the rest of the world. I honestly don’t know if it’s severe depression, drinking, being in a relationship that wouldn’t phase me if it ended right now, not giving a fuck if I ever saw my friends and family again and honestly don’t really care what it would do to them if I just disappeared...

Idk what I’m looking for. Idk what the fuck I’m supposed to do in this life. And I hattttte when people give me suggestions on how to better myself. It’s always fuck you worry about your own fucked up life and leave me alone. It’s always just leave me alone. But I’m here now.

Idk just rambling now I guess.. I hope there’s someone here that can relate cuz I’ve felt utterly alone for as long as I can remember. Thanks if you read all that.",3.772802685207381,5.027456374570448,4.7731407336370175,84.94863941500844,72.02405498281786,7.750723247822265,26.077839047390707,8.20894155585173,1.5663487093422837,2278,73,459,34,43,744,251,582,0.172,0.655,0.17300000000000001,0.9365,1,3,6,0,1,1,60.0,0,4,1,6,36,50,12,2,22,1,39,29,3,10,11,110,109,50,2,19,18,1,7,3,4,3,8,2,1,0,26,34,4,0,22,5,0,4,16,20,0,0,15,13,61,30,66,84,12,66,0,5,4,15,36,28,9,12,36,300,87,5,0.05329717939455545,0.06314844236327861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056958476065511736,0.0,0.16559941279336848,0.0,0.04262173510608544,0.22173761402146386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04077219635603982,0.0,0.0,0.037266627053818405,0.0,0.04385903742772684,0.09489157863873232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040982241115864536,0.0,0.032489465872386845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0471370240251414,0.0,0.05920115131832504,0.0,0.05949727863982996,0.0,0.12191554939354708,0.10868005292710704,0.0,0.056381348845648015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766038274678318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09180956503081722,0.0,0.05531405767210816,0.0556842087409262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10442189071710788,0.12361561472621635,0.0,0.044522954439465065,0.0,0.04720548150262359,0.11014046709734968,0.0,0.03520228433243354,0.14463105025044218,0.0,0.0,0.04790006821786031,0.0,0.10048767481138304,0.0,0.08084596590884223,0.0380755156087504,0.10234730066523028,0.0,0.0974253128136152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235318057725912,0.3941790682476754,0.0,0.1533825329005969,0.030290015283906995,0.08940629081720798,0.04262662315182196,0.0587603284380694,0.05871285188023825,0.0,0.0,0.05673583852252809,0.047743804104613694,0.052619930502992115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035723975891845776,0.0,0.0,0.10587224984400584,0.05248698580440945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05896543236599335,0.0,0.14645367976795715,0.0,0.0,0.11286803494728367,0.0,0.0,0.18822686995612767,0.07811492912298529,0.0,0.0,0.04716632659975505,0.08951241490758306,0.0,0.05818016722493991,0.0,0.2405139263219948,0.0,0.035576281105246334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05920115131832504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903836638990981,0.20553035207984496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15342024318585945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22169732070876672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06008456171900446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053311602368222064,0.0,0.17071768936213974,0.05479837705029627,0.0,0.11444244951434455,0.12075062917967752,0.04551549999210965,0.0,0.08476811249338617,0.0,0.0,0.042470951568382716,0.0,0.0,0.1204212845537513,0.0,0.044087977553031316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045158527145122467,0.0,0.05271227322656368,0.0,0.11317205368362968,0.0,0.12768958893379576,0.0,0.0,0.05571778396148113,0.0,0.0,0.06048100757679085,0.0,0.0,0.04007284598889031,0.0,0.0,0.049068882084626425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830136102049887,0.0,0.1269360212597033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237057258032932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13809495213807266,0.0,0.0,0.06287211457842291,0.0,0.04275178247400988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0513765790220695,0.0,0.07760196273115869,0.05412587278182455,0.0,0.07572157414222214,0.0,0.0,0.0343216361134275
mentalhealth,WillBilloblr,2020/04/09,"Anyone with an Idea of what this is? I guess I've had an active imagination my entire life, I'm what you would call left side brained. I don't remember much from when I was younger but my parents had me tested for: autism, ADHD, and various other things. I vividly remember having a bunch of stickers being put on my head and having people look at my brain waves or something. Now to my knowledge I have never been diagnosed with any disorder or impairment. All I know is that for the last 2 years my mind has been eating away at itself pushing everything real out and replacing it with ""dreamland""(imaginative state). I spend hours every day... actual HOURS everyday there thinking about events people and places that aren't real. I sometimes walk from one end of the room to the other to grab something or look out a window only to find myself twenty minutes later pacing the room staring at the floor. I would describe it almost like waking up from a sleep while moving. I can't think straight, sleep, and my ability to find connection in others is failing. If anyone has an idea of what this might be im very opened minded and just need an answer. Thank you",5.728151515151513,6.93070884545455,5.952727272727272,78.50742424242426,67.36363636363636,8.412121212121212,27.84848484848485,8.648137234880735,2.11040303030303,926,29,162,14,15,295,144,220,0.047,0.902,0.051,-0.0357,1,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,0,1,6,3,0,0,12,0,21,9,6,0,2,42,30,13,0,4,6,1,1,1,0,3,2,0,3,0,14,12,1,0,12,0,1,4,4,1,0,1,5,5,21,2,27,20,4,35,0,1,4,0,4,17,0,7,14,117,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.11026663373807044,0.0,0.13579780201553926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314797899449595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684034477342988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801719521274146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10616234247392252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25227915260159245,0.11538033341034205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287230387936224,0.0,0.0,0.11468735245821833,0.0,0.0,0.12950184035043152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562189863599293,0.0,0.0,0.10007986200279476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520299988020156,0.0,0.1015524482448396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20655041642619024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12447652109296245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596527288072365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22255425128778744,0.0,0.0,0.2551147708269506,0.1220537835618988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062098991873068964,0.09210585042698848,0.0,0.0,0.122769190431207,0.0,0.07981157514251938,0.05520355601465456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18977436192425945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11986963576567056,0.2281850914737098,0.0,0.0,0.12009559954095372,0.08306418585228588,0.083784219008431,0.08714856249223299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656820680373484,0.08593764386965308,0.0,0.0,0.12546736319112367,0.0,0.0,0.1566727461632436,0.0,0.11805552552656375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135909922674036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25722566036072697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560021828054254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261528246942857,0.0,0.0,0.17397784855545906,0.1117547552200036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403043865547454,0.0,0.0,0.07506873012783176,0.14480502195819533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932325510729226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1605365404517016,0.0,0.0,0.0727649522174889
mentalhealth,throwaway13482056194,2020/04/09,I really need some advice right now I’ve for the past two years have began manipulation and lying as if it were normal like big things and enjoy hurting peoples emotions and mentally getting to them I don’t know why but I also have frequent thoughts about physically hurting people in my high school like I could murder them and no one would notice but I know it’s wrong and need advice I also self harm and hate myself but that’s not important compared to this I have also wanted to be the punisher you know like go into the marine Corp and get into that shit but I really need advice.,3.0887617554858933,5.419793362068969,4.595141065830724,80.90032915360501,76.58620689655173,6.631974921630094,21.75235109717868,7.686295010490155,1.1414758620689651,474,13,84,7,11,158,76,116,0.305,0.622,0.073,-0.988,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,2,0,5,12,4,0,3,0,8,1,1,1,0,28,21,16,1,8,6,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,6,9,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,8,0,2,3,0,13,4,9,15,1,12,0,2,0,0,4,6,1,2,8,60,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4082590017053648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33410606115647273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119028964680533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15665229425424612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455184911814366,0.0,0.07914645484427654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1374935243323142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14713915917935907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2981681548928368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296061479775716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20411081514973595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14034449550943975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30978557312422195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644831411446506,0.0,0.15855201405381272,0.0,0.0,0.09436831147323854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294243022592234,0.1930950602930854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17843107394400756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892996524019965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409417380368481,0.0,0.0,0.14528183280282686,0.0,0.1429516174753033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252024570409773,0.0,0.0,0.1105593815935437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603985731731674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08214101133334722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12566332771579322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892854282858413,0.15226238758663627,0.0,0.08968089970810664
mentalhealth,Ozilrox2,2020/04/09,Anyone have any good free online/virtual resources to seek help. Just looking to talk to someone with professional training. Any help is appreciated,6.708750000000002,10.635022375000002,6.705000000000003,61.24000000000001,75.25,8.200000000000001,37.16666666666667,8.841846274778883,4.620516666666667,123,7,15,3,3,39,20,24,0.0,0.547,0.45299999999999996,0.9313,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,0,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5174535167280498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660274157001485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191129218521636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5100304340029286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.319491704690026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223636594718604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3058004141684655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AwkwardGiraffe4,2020/04/09,"I get mad so easily without reason I can go from being happy and cheerful to a raging demon in a matter of seconds. I always have a headache that won’t go away. I can’t be in the same room with my parents because all they do is poke fun at me, and they get mad and yell when I’m open with them.

A few hours ago (I’m writing this out of anger) I was having dinner with my mom and dad, we always sit around the table to eat. They started bringing up the fact that I wasn’t eating the ground beef in my plate. I’m not a vegetarian or anything but red meat makes me sick, I physically can’t eat it. I was trying to brush it off but they wouldn’t stop. I was able to lever through dinner without telling them to fuck off, but when I was walking back to my room my dad said, “disappearing again? Back to your cave” and that pissed me off so much. I stay in my room a lot because when I go to the family room all they do is talk about how I’m never around. Sometimes I leave my room to go outside, I live near a school so I go on the swings there just to be out of the house. But they don’t know because we never talk, they think I just play video games all day. Which sometimes I do, because of the quarantine I can’t go to school or the mall. 

They criticize everything I say and then my mom gets mad because I never talk to her and I’m not open with her. I had some struggle with depression and self harm, and my mom didn’t take it well, my dad just didn’t care. Every time I saw her she would scream and check my arms and scream more when she noticed her yelling wasn’t helping. She also always says that I can tell her anything but she’s extremely homophobic and at least once a week bashes everyone who supports the LGBTQ+  community. Because of this I haven’t talk about the fact that I’m very much in the closet about my sexuality.

I just get so angry and every time I leave the room after being around them I think, “ I should just fucking kill myself.”

I don’t know what to do, I used to go to a counselor but I blew up and yelled at her so my mom stoped paying for the sessions. I’ve tried talking to my friends but only one actually tries to help me and because of that I care about him very very much, I’m so grateful that he’s there for me.",2.126190003310164,3.413918452830188,3.5298449740703965,92.11294687189672,76.21174004192872,6.278914266799076,22.61552466070837,6.7183091564049375,0.3747433962264149,1750,48,403,15,38,575,205,477,0.131,0.7759999999999999,0.09300000000000001,-0.9796,1,1,0,0,1,1,37.0,2,1,11,0,30,23,9,1,23,0,33,10,2,4,8,72,67,37,1,3,18,8,0,0,1,4,1,8,7,1,15,29,5,1,5,4,2,10,19,14,1,2,11,11,77,9,60,48,12,62,1,1,2,2,51,30,3,4,20,275,92,4,0.07178825434780821,0.0,0.0700549806632745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06363595602392191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0574090410655603,0.17920073536358755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11815123314511965,0.19172029908992466,0.0,0.0,0.06744742808459213,0.11040147273795244,0.0,0.30633017475155955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14638581948787752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04629748516023137,0.0,0.061831118277407664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22037191846545912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209694009801002,0.06859675344738479,0.06451865407444797,0.0,0.0676755772080908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05546342723065217,0.13273416872805885,0.1500255997831955,0.0,0.2855924351478104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07641993165040725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962363073157592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069696988996116,0.08283400704184217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07942306712108739,0.0,0.07890589432902394,0.0,0.0,0.15202679189737056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339034381090385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610318066742373,0.0,0.0,0.04791921722209272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33631014342576865,0.0,0.0,0.15831788102415198,0.0,0.1661025820755881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173140338432579,0.0,0.07645214796524935,0.048645579040700215,0.054598202334142164,0.0,0.0,0.07971236088611565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381028178642468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068287069229597,0.11417780245384755,0.0,0.14530709198393302,0.0,0.0,0.0748908057212817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14200083834178587,0.0,0.050812095919495995,0.07651672740358849,0.0,0.060018195100010524,0.0,0.07504867034542625,0.0,0.0,0.08146446030459005,0.0,0.0,0.05397583311106476,0.2885033977701212,0.12549219699075598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199802940682324,0.0,0.0,0.08372061683211161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14621853719215558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062002002487765676,0.0,0.17769848433342508,0.0,0.0,0.057584207437062065,0.0,0.06454626208143605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840263084291335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509963161830433,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,csamuelsm,2020/04/09,"Difficulty talking to parents and having more serious conversations and problems with attitude Whenever I talk to other people about me and about attitudes and things that have already happened, one thing in common is noticed: I have a very difficult time imposing myself.  

This happens even more with my parents, because I am always afraid of disappointing them and that they will be angry with me and, therefore, I always speak in an inferiority tone with them and I never know how to communicate properly.  

This happens mainly with my parents, but also with other people.  And what happens is that I have a low self-esteem and apparently my attitudes and relationships are making my self-esteem worse. 

 Now, I am having insecurity problems, mainly related to sex, besides having anxiety attacks whenever I need to have a little more serious conversations.

I was going to therapy but I'm not anymore because of the quarantine. But it's been a few months of therapy and I don't feel like it's getting better. I really want help with this.",7.8146721311475424,9.248526491803279,8.79903005464481,59.13985655737707,62.77049180327869,11.56448087431694,38.74726775956285,11.374738998889045,5.275182513661203,840,43,117,25,12,286,105,183,0.201,0.748,0.051,-0.9708,4,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,3,1,6,13,1,2,6,0,17,1,0,3,1,32,29,16,0,4,4,3,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,13,18,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,11,0,1,2,2,21,2,20,25,6,10,0,3,0,1,13,4,0,0,6,104,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726543483239215,0.09947317180400146,0.20700183810036574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515660690152808,0.0,0.1233596370633517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415094966441989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15165174352945313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100112249656577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215721083568718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289439442492717,0.08886293099631219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498768306018961,0.0,0.0706926615442203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4399841793250476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08337476601003532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06836048327279945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06076977505935058,0.1246696207695248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303006702381631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928544776213864,0.0,0.0,0.09223224933759873,0.09593582228639146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161675199114976,0.0,0.0,0.08428864080650147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4143550156292666,0.0,0.0,0.1724701854305105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23804535268937074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968624459625834,0.0,0.0,0.13354633984135694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595279714059597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999569929736491,0.0,0.0,0.28449741784119803,0.0,0.16527594137770424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253174018502774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263326433911024,0.07336736338365754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12676216843441798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gloverslover,2020/04/09,"Been diagnosed and treated for depression for the past 5 years. Nothing has changed. Hey guys. I'm not sure where to post this but I think it may reach the right people here. I won't bore you with a long history of my mental health but I do need advice horribly. I do not think I have depression anymore. I think it was a quick ""one-size-fits-all"" diagnosis and I am in desperate need to see a psychiatrist to get a real diagnosis. I've tried every anti-depressant and nothing helps. I decided to look into other disorders and my symptoms align MUCH closer with those of bipolar and borderline personality disorder. I am not trying to self diagnose at all but I would like to get professionally examined. I don't know how though. I need a referral and I don't want to overstep my GP by asking for one or mentioning that I don't think his diagnosis is right. How do I see the right doctors? What have you all done to finally see a psychiatrist? I'm so hopeless and I need treatment that will actually work for me. Advice please. Thank you for reading this jumbled mess.",2.5222246503496493,5.0697408990384645,4.549195804195804,79.2867132867133,79.91346153846153,8.397202797202798,27.243006993007,9.095868883498916,2.7302711538461537,849,37,160,24,22,290,121,208,0.161,0.777,0.062,-0.9694,0,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,3,0,1,7,9,0,0,9,0,19,6,0,2,3,37,39,15,0,6,7,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,0,3,9,10,0,0,7,1,0,0,7,5,0,1,3,4,24,4,21,32,3,14,0,3,4,0,11,8,0,2,6,107,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.10692827105669266,0.0,0.0,0.21414859546810566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866781549747408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10243675805577476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11591460397321254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2831273884729399,0.22243030180022275,0.0,0.0,0.2511622495019643,0.11215347817525476,0.0,0.11213209143689264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923206942254353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003279638222394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449562791379254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849533834596764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164718782913098,0.0,0.0,0.07344504171385266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021892217299376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05353224815813255,0.0,0.0,0.09696940886691502,0.09201443684066164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11042466841937408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805493872336303,0.3249904844900939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21027812795620449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850015265511682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460063804622703,0.07596471072443603,0.09567565906840657,0.0,0.12027918252434908,0.0,0.0,0.10494145897089573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096035019064081,0.12471902968908882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807264067416182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26194851483024995,0.0,0.11430942237084067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032720565574582,0.11388918488123252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088087906195542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28084199387271863,0.1076557509605428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487869026143568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06462949549387086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797710675754841,0.0,0.0,0.07783811897577042,0.0,0.0,0.0705619666654666
mentalhealth,IntelligentPea2,2020/04/09,"I need some advice on improving my sleep schedule  I am a 15 year old girl. My sleep schedule for the past 6 or so years has been awful. While we are not currently in school due to COVID-19, when I am in school on a normal day, I typically average out about 5-6 hours (I go to bed around 1am-2am, and wake up at about 7:15am.) Now that we are at home, I am getting more sleep... but that is not necessarily a good thing, because my sleep schedule remains inconsistent and I am now *oversleeping* sometimes (in part due to my depression.)

I want to start a consistent, healthy sleep schedule. I am tired of waking up at random times of the day during this virus. I am tired of *being* tired when I am at school.

I can still function, oddly enough. My grades are fine - I'm in my first year of high school (I turned 15 three days ago, if you're wondering,) and I maintained a 4.0 GPA first semester, and only have a 3.9 this semester due to a B+ in Geometry. I'm able to keep physically fit, as I've been on the track team and am improving. Once I get my sleep schedule together, I think that I'll truly be able to live a happy and healthy life.

Reddit, how can I get about doing this?",3.1899346405228783,4.443285789915969,4.4406162464986,86.77578898225958,73.45378151260505,7.97796451914099,26.247432306255835,8.515128840125781,1.6055454715219413,910,31,198,16,18,300,131,238,0.07,0.8109999999999999,0.11900000000000001,0.8966,1,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,2,0,0,3,11,4,0,0,11,1,21,12,8,1,0,24,34,15,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,1,7,10,0,1,2,1,0,1,2,1,0,3,2,0,26,3,32,30,4,48,0,1,0,0,4,18,0,5,29,123,33,7,0.19461212160371533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508635643754876,0.08625595178909852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662302419654869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05931687150260916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18826307786290894,0.0,0.0838095675846724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054317235795912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16553697121847188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15251520182825526,0.0,0.05530127677274687,0.08161570714581315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358411112242584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280919571062024,0.09760591283551012,0.0,0.09582686907652456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649009778411791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873014842644877,0.0,0.0,0.08592303441771595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072151211123958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533927955289087,0.0,0.0,0.1021063421702775,0.10362777902770252,0.0,0.07400564401884456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537298144200938,0.0928896454456541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3939157138165292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5842580044514676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09623818224256936,0.0,0.06887373066710124,0.0,0.07770874585172645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06464582304831877,0.06234979471530185,0.0,0.0,0.05673994656817565,0.3355170077757982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584105201366263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05739363577403825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055242721409621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18798573855562664
mentalhealth,NonstopNostalgia,2020/04/09,"Anyone else here super highly ridden with nostalgia? I'm self-diagnosed with Bipolar disorder and psychosis and anxiety and depression and OCD and ADD and Hypochondria and cancer and a ton of other stuff.. lol... I'm too afraid of doctors and I know I'm dying with the terrible pains I have in the most terrifying places.. But it's easier to run from it and be 99.999% sure I'm dying than 100% when I hear those words from the dr.. 

But anyways.. I just spend my days being sssoooo nostalgic for my childhood. I'll be 28 in a few weeks. But everything from the music, TV shows and video games to the love my family had for me and my complete lack of worries and responsibilities. The societal norms, the simplicity, having to go get your photos developed lol.. I just miss everything about it so much. I would do ANYTHING to go back. I'm so physically and mentally unhealthy now. With a billion things to worry about. I just miss everything about the 90s and early 00s so terribly. Anyone else like this? How does it effect you? Why can't I ever get back to that feeling of carefree happiness and comfort and contentment and euphoria again?",3.025913043478262,5.729419316279074,4.4658847320525785,79.69393326592521,79.09302325581395,8.018200202224468,26.09201213346816,8.841846274778883,2.496189079878665,903,36,160,23,23,299,132,215,0.17300000000000001,0.693,0.134,-0.868,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,2,0,2,19,13,0,1,11,2,9,6,0,2,2,39,24,26,2,2,6,0,1,1,0,1,5,1,0,1,10,23,0,0,3,4,1,4,1,7,0,1,1,2,15,6,25,19,5,18,0,3,0,1,6,4,0,1,11,113,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470236844552366,0.0,0.0,0.19140024159786545,0.28047146004698353,0.1126293284846208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21048352026789435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350174385719705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826746069960834,0.0,0.11788277016938173,0.13891644475254256,0.2840912859355482,0.0,0.15686067264432849,0.14008848910101748,0.11977264841260488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286685141657117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380343195763432,0.0,0.0,0.3690198988043373,0.0,0.12902539589060935,0.0,0.06920372922766611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430140177913305,0.0,0.15556857976361482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14569675416005615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542583019581688,0.0,0.0,0.14460679297754195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07521815604616484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06686597584548322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235272071690326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792907014598538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061250118288116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14563542576939098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14299618517672116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427814324663029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15667920378795402,0.0,0.0,0.12899489703638234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092790859607286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978591492124942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350057535476178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27798880516274344,0.0,0.09722591451637023,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JasonReedemy,2020/04/09,"Do I have Bipolar Disorder or some kind of anger issues? So what I'm going to describe might sound pretty normal but I don't think it is.

Throughout the day I have major mood swings. But as soon as I eat something like a good meal my terrible mood immediately goes away and I regain a normal temper.

But then gradually over the next few hours it starts to come back as my appetite increases and crave some food. Not only do I have mood swings but also have negative thought patterns. Like I'll think of people who piss me off sometimes and start to paint them in a much worse light than they really are in my mind. I also feel more on edge to act impulsive verbally or even physically if pushed to that point.

But as soon as I have a nice nutritious filling meal, the sun comes out and feel mentally stable again.

I know if you go for like a 12 hours without eating its normal to be hangry, but for me its like 3 hours and I'm at that point and my lack of patience and anger is just way up there. I do have a fast metabolism but eat 5 good meals a day.

I'm just wondering if this is normal? I don't know too many other people who get pissed off as easily as I do.

Starting to wonder if I have a chemical imbalance or some kind of disorder.",4.138855951829549,4.812388188976378,5.335484020379808,83.42167438629002,70.65354330708661,8.811116257526633,25.964798517832328,9.007467420416297,1.7721410838351093,976,28,206,18,17,325,142,254,0.156,0.7290000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.9341,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,2,0,13,18,5,0,11,0,19,10,2,0,0,47,39,32,0,9,18,0,2,4,0,1,1,1,0,0,11,10,7,0,9,0,0,8,5,6,0,0,1,4,22,9,32,36,9,36,0,0,0,0,5,12,2,13,19,138,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647740226668128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679297753238254,0.07921790032426552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1774894267394758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13288190723298468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361452927910016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3162530397162469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06804535270653284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418248643974104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245751483533856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05382497495265638,0.0,0.1171000582812029,0.17282067650463745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043690654705525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752866557906744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145640440384908,0.1132368820258471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20132624930903725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10444858831506557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10382239252495,0.10929053269836668,0.1040233001530876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573335033485051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956553807463014,0.0,0.4037604859652458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835321111442578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284558202020234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19477901896051386,0.0,0.0,0.10481086289660813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599881573701301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079311710696744,0.10189183150139892,0.0,0.21875944858300309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202524464283225,0.0,0.08178831290428888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817744208340882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930995975709454,0.22344689198709072,0.0,0.0,0.10498867200124262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,b1gfish3rmen,2020/04/09,"Why dont i care about most people? Also social anxiety? Hello everyone! This is my first post on reddit!!

For about 7 years i have noticed a decrease in my desire to socialize. I just dont like it. I like to be in my own head and think logically. I love making up math problems and solving them by memory! 

I dont like socializing because to me most people cant see things the logical way. They dont use reasoning and critical thinking, and are often hypocritical. (I know im usually wrong about this, but its just how i feel). Because of this, i dont really care about them, its almost as if since they cant see things the way i consider to be the right way, my brain just writes them off. I dont care what they are talking about. Or their emotional wellbeing. I dont want to hurt them, i just dont want to be around them because i get internally very frustrated. 

I dont like this behavior. Externally, i dont look frustrated at all. People tell me im the kindest person amd stuff like that. I have to try really really hard in a conversation to keep concentration, and try to care about that person. Trying to focus on the conversation amd not getting frustrated leaves me INCREDIBLY exauhsted. 

Since this is like 98% of people for me, i dont want to get tired trying to act like i care about the conversation, and i dont want to get frustrated with the persons lack of critical thinking and inefficiency, so i just dont want to go out. 

This super sucks because i have people in my life that i want to maintain relationships with, and latley my behavior is making this really hard to do. I am so frustratedbwith myself for not caring about the other people in my life. 

I have been diagnosed with anxiety for a long while. It started at the exact same time i started acting like this. I see my therapist in a few weeks, but the behavior above is getting so bad i just need some help. 

Is this anxiety? What can i do about it? I try to force myself to go out with friends but most of the time that just makes me more frustrated, and want to isolate more. 

Please give me some tips if ya have any?",3.7175240384615376,5.202373012019232,5.449711538461538,79.14528846153848,72.48557692307692,9.23846153846154,26.70192307692308,9.673873057562805,2.4589365384615403,1647,57,327,42,32,563,170,416,0.248,0.691,0.062,-0.9973,0,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,1,9,2,23,27,6,0,15,0,35,7,2,6,2,67,75,22,0,13,15,0,3,8,1,0,4,0,0,3,24,16,0,1,8,0,0,4,17,10,0,1,1,7,56,17,57,71,12,34,0,1,4,1,28,16,1,10,18,231,80,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04740105919288299,0.0,0.0,0.037855295154341766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032190709576739904,0.0,0.10863777764844884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04213986957698685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03952432726883403,0.11542451915154585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05284362633724175,0.0,0.0,0.289578695285757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04804594859631995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7212202981510787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053247631740706604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04523242855450088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0239349547353373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04026473585987872,0.0,0.0,0.03657236506859607,0.0,0.12365786065853247,0.045409859860003815,0.05380529281353017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480911402000503,0.0,0.048581307531842026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031728920657651205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05067512156180691,0.0,0.1022639320780856,0.0,0.0,0.04207520430196182,0.0,0.0,0.026015117687050254,0.0,0.0,0.050122933355309915,0.0,0.0,0.06687089298858481,0.18501131347193125,0.0,0.0,0.04189165950977157,0.039751066889586274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04272339287449033,0.0,0.094793228270567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03509970535877889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053893364896287946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969046424193763,0.12399824377296488,0.0,0.05196169203567097,0.0,0.0,0.045335657080274885,0.0,0.0,0.04529501232719826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12130089969891104,0.048670208569751405,0.0,0.05082210630055768,0.0,0.040425446829187035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11316412176359275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831513188629922,0.0,0.0,0.14476199930153055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06701059111043604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054189415693138065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038047600422889294,0.04137452976463076,0.0,0.0,0.05496177970233088,0.06289705484703366,0.09099470637828667,0.0,0.0,0.05520504439473009,0.05440679341961965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069321079363594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04088387579326126,0.052134898452559385,0.039057893135908926,0.19544367608379976,0.1127214637349477,0.03797079916853949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04271418193634861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05175545995525172,0.0,0.030483406225013318
mentalhealth,EnvironmentalEase3,2020/04/09,"Being afraid of starting something that I know will take a long time. Any time I see a movie or T.V. series I'd like to watch, anytime I see a video game I'd like to play but realize it's going to take 60+ hours -- I get this feeling of daunting dread. I'm afraid it's going to take too long, and just push it off. I get anxious, and my chest gets super heavy.

Like just now, I tried pushing myself to play a game I know I'd like and love to play, but I quit 10 minutes in because I just feel this dread, and I can't explain why. I'm going to try again tomorrow -- but I don't know...",2.0208527131782965,2.4637543410852736,3.720930232558139,93.91457364341088,75.35658914728683,6.353488372093022,23.635658914728683,5.82211442006289,0.2396728682170544,446,12,110,2,9,150,71,129,0.078,0.6920000000000001,0.23,0.9612,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,2,8,13,0,4,4,0,4,2,1,0,0,18,25,8,0,0,7,0,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,7,6,0,5,2,4,0,0,0,5,13,9,11,23,0,16,0,0,3,1,4,2,0,1,13,52,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693192747055185,0.0,0.0,0.19425460796690647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481915185479708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388621921808814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695104056507382,0.0,0.29316952062542984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16933615828104082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28349774464599803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3360244271186137,0.0,0.0,0.3043407589223917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15519162959071792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18289003931427486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27404384789518177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323755458721215,0.0,0.0,0.12170712734375624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3878551046787159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005309088258664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23348558781827886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515817109399993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,L0nzillian,2020/04/09,"My friend uses me as a therapist, but it's too much for me. How can I ask them to stop? I don't want to seem mean or like I don't care. I just don't know what to do. I'll keep things short, I don't want to ramble.

Basically, they message me almost daily, telling me about how they're scared they won't be able to make any friends their age (college drop out), is afraid people will hate them because they are really troubled emotionally, and thinks the world is against them (parents and all).

I spend hours giving advice on how they can make things better a tiny bit at a time, listen to them when they need it, and try my hardest to be supportive, but nothing changes. They don't listen to me and shoot down every idea I give. I've tried stating to them that I'm not a trained therapist and can't really help them in the way they need, and that I'm not stable enough myself to be helping others, but they come back again a few days later as if I hadn't said that.

There are times when they are genuinely kind/happy. And I love supporting them in their pursuits when they are healthy, but it's so few and far between. This isn't even a friend in real life, I only know them online (for about a year now)

What am I supposed to do? I don't want to be a jerk, but this is really emotionally/mentally taxing on me. :(",5.3195604395604414,4.606809087912094,5.858183150183152,85.47848351648355,68.01098901098901,9.038241758241758,28.090109890109893,8.238735603445708,1.5583696703296708,1023,27,229,12,15,332,146,273,0.145,0.72,0.136,0.2698,1,0,0,1,0,0,37.0,0,0,20,1,16,14,2,2,10,0,27,2,0,6,1,42,55,24,0,6,10,1,0,1,3,2,1,3,0,0,13,10,0,2,6,0,2,1,12,5,0,0,2,3,41,9,28,47,6,29,0,0,0,1,35,11,0,4,15,155,54,2,0.11718740553899798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451417641664526,0.0,0.0,0.11734625896164808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969145429388402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955440504203802,0.0,0.0,0.09010988131263888,0.0,0.07143635472239962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036427370657447,0.1279382955766512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11948037007817425,0.0,0.12396873656480258,0.10094657338982407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07557618190047856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182005823780396,0.0,0.12108591608987003,0.0,0.07740117613776422,0.0,0.09873544341796267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716160964705049,0.0,0.0,0.22483367525020315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247481722872149,0.0,0.1156983015862553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570964954565974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154059888506838,0.0,0.0,0.1322903167535017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416155047909942,0.0,0.12203264958504495,0.12880626673763054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277293017550671,0.057251846981859186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057662088007289,0.0,0.15644700634479672,0.0,0.0,0.1276514392971103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614622682686146,0.17378595266188618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244447617647367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891263025791451,0.0,0.0,0.13012274565661447,0.0,0.0,0.08124299173032012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333849230914638,0.2252197582298937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147205831343268,0.0,0.11732503645272392,0.0,0.0,0.10668301275155694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797391833526836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659657581441404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242695768506688,0.0,0.0,0.27212722009853896,0.15570821014719374,0.07508895764934571,0.0,0.0,0.13666583713188266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15912511195530366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10121229267619868,0.0,0.0,0.2073605040236515,0.09301790789211746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546484702710213
mentalhealth,cavityclown2001,2020/04/09,Advice on outpatient Hey guys I’m really considering going into a program like outpatient. Any advice or thoughts?,4.495000000000001,7.369549947368426,6.7572368421052635,55.076907894736884,102.15789473684212,10.321052631578947,31.065789473684212,8.841846274778883,5.68498947368421,95,5,10,4,4,33,17,19,0.0,0.865,0.135,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,4,0,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7459248084967087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2595479208037564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169112154035865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3779121889713949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18646413191955988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24450685246176096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030024513783854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kientha,2020/04/09,"Isolation is forcing me to act similarly to how I do when in a depression spiral... Anyone else? So I was first diagnosed with depression aged 10 and its something I've struggled with for as long as I can remember. I mostly have it under control but wow its hard at the moment. When I was in a depressed spiral, I'd often find myself just staying in the house not doing much, not having any human interaction beyond what I could avoid and that feeling of helplessness making me spiral further. Eventually I'd force myself out of the loop and go back to being normal. This has cost me friendships, relationships and work. 

Things got bad enough a couple years ago that I actually sought help which made a huge difference. I could probably use more help but I'm not in a position to get anything more than I've already had without medication which my GP wants to avoid and getting myself to ask for help is still a huge challenge

Then came the lock down and I'm seriously struggling to hang on to my sanity. I'm lucky enough to still be in work but my team are in limbo waiting for contracts to go through so I don't have work to distract me. My usual coping methods can't be done while we're in lock down and I live alone so the only human contact I get is virtual or brief. This virus has been forcing me to act at least in part like I'm in a depressed spiral. I've already had a few days where I've acted exactly as I would do in a spiral. So far I've been able to snap myself out of it and act like a human but it's getting harder every day and I'm just at a loss of what to do. Anyone else finding the lock down forcing them into unhealthy behaviour?",3.7444477611940283,5.054247385074628,5.2049552238805985,81.61250746268658,72.16417910447761,7.748059701492537,27.42985074626865,8.238735603445708,1.8512710447761203,1314,47,255,20,25,442,175,335,0.146,0.746,0.10800000000000001,-0.9129,0,4,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,8,15,18,0,5,17,0,29,2,0,5,1,47,49,26,0,5,11,0,2,2,0,1,2,0,0,3,14,15,0,4,4,1,1,9,6,13,0,1,10,2,26,5,51,33,9,53,0,6,0,0,12,27,0,4,18,180,40,5,0.1023335313977416,0.0,0.0998627648548228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907125011321318,0.0,0.0,0.10598667634976128,0.2258551931637353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06959031051678151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14310796905284004,0.2097055922684698,0.08421177695837885,0.0,0.09566803784558092,0.0,0.0,0.07868816897294498,0.08544422424265216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704229795518928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147757570593612,0.16340999573172146,0.11323010607672615,0.0,0.1319933238194324,0.0,0.3525588825683295,0.10386638026479447,0.0,0.10691675972875374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472273206311256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17097306866174058,0.0,0.0,0.2114757868222188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622041381161563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05174290825327993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18706198753860054,0.08704484952981026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21386018597828446,0.0,0.1163170083409861,0.0,0.08184547340477616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09167074377835116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20577602699293035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11807915567006555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998998874921043,0.0,0.0903623830614126,0.09056195503856697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09683046172981838,0.06830842684088673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309026684969336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07522692022437429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026513330377836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782926195351582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11081724217391857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033285496477764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10986791546615128,0.11592394234391595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878135203398022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907392856038467,0.16344738072769574,0.0,0.0,0.2139624520173868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798585111896423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883833145957858,0.11270592726219462,0.0,0.06035896818876221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864587248683904,0.0,0.2235000889320976,0.0,0.0,0.07269480461250345,0.0,0.0,0.06589943908352658
mentalhealth,eridmines,2020/04/09,"Life is just too hard Short and simple, I don’t want to be alive anymore. I feel like a burden. But if I ever did anything I know I would hurt people a hell of a lot if I left. But everything hurts for me atm. Every fucking little thing hurts and I just don’t want to do it anymore",0.2216666666666676,1.9153893387096799,2.523870967741935,95.37247311827957,83.03225806451613,4.778494623655916,18.397849462365595,5.46131890053228,-0.4790408602150538,217,5,51,1,6,74,43,62,0.27899999999999997,0.604,0.11599999999999999,-0.9153,0,0,0,0,0,2,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,2,0,3,0,7,2,0,0,1,15,12,6,0,5,6,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,6,0,0,1,2,8,1,4,9,1,4,1,3,0,1,0,3,2,3,2,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3856654726050206,0.0,0.0,0.1600079707533607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17588257149688827,0.1638245142164642,0.0,0.1747505910752636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09831496317405372,0.13890833783079273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17975711655691812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17418050324095202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6244577562748667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068594181878646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126018096540772,0.0,0.13733908115318924,0.09499381068351063,0.19488047046083415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16530636672004131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348005659666743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291776337039187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293720989030752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13812495817666506,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,waning_willow,2020/04/09,"I feel like I'm drowning. Before anyone suggests it, yes I am talking to a therapist and am having a phone session with him tomorrow. But yeah, the title pretty much sums it up. I keep feeling myself dissociate and like I'm working so hard to keep my head above water. I know it is for most people, but this quarantine is rough.",2.681743589743593,4.806547969230773,4.610384615384618,81.30378205128206,77.0,6.7948717948717965,26.21794871794872,7.793537801064563,1.758025641025641,258,10,47,4,6,88,49,65,0.023,0.81,0.16699999999999998,0.7065,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,3,2,5,2,1,0,0,11,12,5,1,0,2,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,7,2,5,12,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,31,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18961149859840287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23074950595999744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742279256893521,0.19372709969313726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429190662195123,0.0,0.2783032460066566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4820646676071556,0.0,0.0,0.14903040007323476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649643026458558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19934444144643584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18799823746741468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27588193087013985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21795977173965625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31485446717208776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974182480531836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,urgonnadiesomeday,2020/04/09,I need someone to talk to about my mental health. How do I find someone to talk to and how do I know what I'm looking for? I really don't know anything. Therapist? Psychologist? Counselor? How do I find somebody?,0.1857142857142869,2.507393761904765,2.4833333333333343,87.94500000000002,99.4761904761905,5.257142857142857,25.04761904761905,6.868970318607317,1.4893904761904762,166,8,32,3,7,56,25,42,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,3,0,9,9,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,6,9,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,21,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067554087168804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4592716017386825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670645036667121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761582760990792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21098474812573556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531985376781009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18629694933671176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095567850723808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42576263796613134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.403886688843308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917178872015713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZamboniLizard,2020/04/09,"TRIGGER WARNING I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I just destroyed some art, threw shit all over my room and now I’m fighting the urge to jump out the window. My mind is racing. I know it won’t kill me and that’s not my intention. I just wanna do it. What’s wrong with me? Why do I feel so good yet like I want to cry? My mind is going a million miles per hour. I don’t want to be here. I can’t stop shaking.",-2.389559270516717,-0.628767372340425,0.3349544072948341,104.62000000000002,100.38297872340424,3.1112462006079036,14.161094224924009,4.65589566412798,-1.4680097264437686,313,7,83,1,14,106,60,94,0.299,0.613,0.08900000000000001,-0.9705,0,0,0,0,2,1,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,9,4,1,3,0,9,1,1,2,1,21,17,3,1,3,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,5,5,0,1,3,1,0,4,5,7,0,1,1,1,15,2,8,14,2,12,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,1,5,52,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25235098274004336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11615993957448095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13056259414561291,0.19268919399049725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262407912731741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541655968959535,0.0,0.2525105672407433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122359705247633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4639298090513413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23581768825412686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19206712778990345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2710050259743642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20729835704992067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5023540815120565,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawaygoawaythx1,2020/04/09,"how can i cope with intrusive thoughts about losing control? Whenever i’m in public i have intrusive thoughts about flashing my naked body, touching someone inappropriately/sexually without consent, saying disrespectful things/using slurs.
I have no desire to do any of these things, but it’s my biggest fear to lose control and do things that could harm other people and my reputation. I suspect I have OCD but i’m under 18 and not in a household that’s particularly accepting of mental health issues so right now i have no diagnosis. I have a BFRB (Trichotillomania) which is a very effective at distracting me but is still an unhealthy coping mechanism. I’ve also been trying to write more so i can understand what i’m feeling.",5.917293546148508,8.420961381679392,6.799583622484387,67.52437196391398,68.77099236641222,9.34378903539209,34.046495489243576,9.800150414767053,3.931543511450382,595,29,91,15,11,197,89,131,0.218,0.696,0.085,-0.9565,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,5,8,6,0,2,4,0,13,2,1,4,0,22,20,10,0,2,5,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,9,4,0,2,7,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,3,12,1,13,16,1,8,0,2,0,0,3,6,0,0,2,67,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463602063007362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12445917738613547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20329281993388454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4105426804794689,0.14612575726715246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20594722652803826,0.09253989167380623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19454060956792604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19102425761879469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4095028318977072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18444007790371456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268823113938361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629720263957975,0.0,0.14554403289044673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15507138160252526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14615918796900584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431793461281397,0.0,0.0,0.2905932417239427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242578687446147,0.0,0.0,0.19052920503348308,0.22014928955938676,0.0,0.0,0.1510098197289604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17642375858186382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,EcstaticHobbit,2020/04/09,"Friendship withdrawal So this is going to be a long post, I might be all over the place so I want to thank you guys beforehand for all the comments and help.

I am an international student, living in the US. I live in a two bedroom apartment with 3 other people, so there is four of us. I sleep in the hall and it is important to the story.

So i have been in the USA for two years now. I have a lady friend, who goes to school with me, and we’ve been friends since day 1. We had a tight friendship and I think i placed her on a pedestal in my life. I have been with her through her tough times and i kind of started baby sitting her, she didn’t ask me to do that but i guess It felt nice to see her satisfied and happy. After the first 5months of friendship, she started to have her meals in my apartment and we all roommates would cook together and with each other and we were all okay with her presence. She would sit on the couch and study throughout the day and I’d study on my desk which is almost in the same area. 

Lately, she has been pushing me away and kind of acting out. I have confronted her a couple of times regarding that behavior and she would respond rudely by saying “ don’t look at my expressions.” 

She talks to every roommate of mine nicely but ignores my presence and acts as if I am not around. I still don’t have a problem with her coming over and I still love her presence but I’ve started to feel anxious all the time. I am afraid to just ask her anything or even just talk to her. 

My problem is she is sitting right in front of me while she ignores me all through the day and yet accepts any meal I prepare for her or any kind of help i voluntarily do. The difference in behavior is pretty evident but after numerous confrontations she still says that she doesn’t have a problem with me while she clearly does. 

I have been nothing but extremely appreciative and supporting but her behavior just makes me question myself and I do not know how to handle this situation.",4.211382142857143,5.221201202500001,4.8494285714285725,85.73900000000002,70.725,7.814285714285713,29.035714285714285,8.07648339933343,1.8019964285714285,1571,59,323,21,28,504,186,400,0.079,0.775,0.146,0.9795,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,5,1,0,1,17,23,3,1,22,1,39,6,1,2,7,75,58,35,0,8,14,0,3,0,2,4,1,2,2,1,11,32,3,3,6,1,0,6,6,10,0,4,9,7,67,13,54,43,8,57,0,0,2,1,48,25,0,7,22,251,78,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740635322317204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229998151633138,0.0,0.0,0.10989248873006127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004861921376448,0.08659492194239153,0.18187703927002705,0.0,0.09139258802419517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379336223655584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10763237604343384,0.0,0.18820200152770156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163114110899904,0.0,0.0,0.08512556413149405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06424888504735447,0.0,0.08195795556089977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04918490630861154,0.0,0.09339876772270857,0.0,0.0,0.08274163384505008,0.0,0.0,0.15030806360602758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05528333592446205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071588205933624,0.09631704130181626,0.0,0.10355050634997183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040208407128634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038892456075327,0.05345951727061153,0.0,0.10972986480676863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870785098166139,0.0,0.0,0.17179031850869012,0.08608486503876123,0.08168607470751076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779402756151466,0.0,0.06493147926304835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10319286465286194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09333749930638882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06743788527572217,0.0,0.20326228221799805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09316207490631123,0.09896312994365147,0.0,0.27923565707916376,0.0,0.0,0.108969694199544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307188531431754,0.0,0.15471316190270315,0.0,0.09844697990578488,0.07751517655502513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08046646561414315,0.10934060549855436,0.09734474323072656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20655415992402715,0.0,0.23305060670715436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103859416239418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563711051689964,0.0,0.08955728368890807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06232956718579698,0.0,0.0,0.17016461695927726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19004608977082868,0.0,0.2340184753847241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05737501612234072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20730302613569215,0.0,0.0,0.06264158406495925
mentalhealth,Dogsandbears,2020/04/09,"Grief, struggle, amidst global crisis 28, female. My life decided to fall apart at the same time this pandemic happened to begin. My mom was recently diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. My dad died of complications related to chemo almost 5 years ago and neither of my brothers are in a position to take care of my mom, so I had to completely drop everything and move home to take care of my mom. I left a developing relationship, my job at a place that I loved, my house, breaking a lease, the town that I love and all of my hobbies, which are a MASSIVE part of my life, to move home and take care of my mom. She started chemo today, in the same room where my dad died. 

On top of all of this, this global pandemic is happening and my state is heavily affected. Getting her to doctors appointments and going to the pharmacy is a nightmare, let alone making sure I don’t get infected while taking care of someone with a compromised immune system. 

I’m really struggling with all of this and feel like I need to talk to a councilor, but it is impossible to see one right now because of the pandemic. I feel like I’m getting crushed by the weight of this and idk what to do. I’m trying to just be strong but damn this is hard.",7.351125,6.165737862500002,7.845000000000002,74.44000000000003,64.125,11.666666666666664,35.833333333333336,10.864195022040775,3.734833333333333,957,38,188,22,12,318,133,240,0.13,0.7609999999999999,0.109,-0.4841,1,1,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,4,14,1,2,14,0,13,10,0,2,4,27,39,12,3,1,3,7,4,2,0,0,7,0,3,0,11,11,1,0,3,0,0,4,2,4,0,1,2,5,22,10,36,35,7,33,0,1,1,2,13,15,1,1,11,119,33,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587147731553887,0.0,0.09700364725039164,0.10033052071468117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05905247440917806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3950711944280184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10156879695730177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832337776425973,0.20107637275293846,0.0,0.0,0.09915293656442084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706260557632474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796312342528216,0.138411226576241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183538552901438,0.0,0.055054778660635545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713277664030908,0.0,0.08677858174580645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19434169482960312,0.0,0.0,0.11177766472110204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613084179632994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052520720885724,0.09905852270160814,0.136847585797351,0.09465385634282124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748621234336976,0.0,0.06466303379049497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4538228174228294,0.0,0.20591991616150154,0.0,0.07182960666260557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564319919267703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490329534236044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012109686439514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062058896393369006,0.0,0.09564974101749857,0.10400463103662896,0.0,0.08272844216837041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07719470644658863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207961248325706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06856673514051928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20254398914682775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09130102640881092,0.0,0.2913437508091641,0.0778623109481054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056487035776118764,0.0,0.09182364368692926,0.0,0.0,0.06576995451485235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179644027348246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06238260567994992
mentalhealth,FledBug115,2020/04/09,"Hi, I Need to Know I'm not alone on this. I know this probably isn't the best SR, but i couldn't find another one. It's not a kink or anything, but i want people to hate me. It feels like all i do is screw up and mess up people's lives. It feels like i can't do anything right. I just want to know if anyone can relate, because i really hope it's not a ""Just Me"" Thing.",1.1686274509803916,1.4796030588235318,3.5397058823529406,94.91700980392159,77.23529411764707,7.0784313725490176,20.049019607843128,7.1686216300943375,0.05425490196078453,280,5,75,3,6,98,51,85,0.142,0.6809999999999999,0.177,0.2442,0,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,2,7,2,0,3,0,7,1,0,0,1,22,18,5,0,6,9,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,0,2,10,4,6,17,2,4,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,3,2,46,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104363299624591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130551103345858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14207029049802192,0.0,0.33440462316711445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385848195893075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2132280421029334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20547087783886314,0.29030797746118425,0.0,0.0,0.1857055975753079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20060116526644012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20180658245908933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.334992219163114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985299189488058,0.0,0.1794143274703073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506576334006197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13768207148435818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817230432494106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21906565874796755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13016424419523714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735171872867194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498576888698893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23968521673512302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,95horrorsQueen,2020/04/09,Mental Health During Quarantine... I've only been in quarantine for a week and I can feel myself deteriorating and my old thoughts and feelings coming back.. it really takes a toll on me being locked up in the house 24/7 since my job has closed and my boyfriend is away for 9 hours a day and we stay home on his days off. Even getting dressed and doing my makeup or binge watching a show doesnt help me feel any kind of okay...,4.271686274509804,5.353387247058823,4.789117647058824,85.95936274509806,70.6470588235294,7.549019607843138,24.75490196078432,7.793537801064563,1.0846078431372543,336,9,70,4,6,107,67,85,0.028999999999999998,0.971,0.0,-0.3089,1,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,5,1,7,1,0,0,0,14,14,7,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,9,0,0,4,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,4,10,2,10,11,0,16,0,0,1,0,3,8,0,1,6,42,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813882834681072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466806955397476,0.16750569252880307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18765007164314665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809778573339843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388141924765316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33043970117286603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381253060084535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23155398077118666,0.0,0.0,0.14601371615398193,0.0,0.21851151508013625,0.0,0.2145287487099787,0.2513583808327168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161728177297469,0.0,0.0,0.2268470802768732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21953171806753785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285866796258372,0.0,0.0,0.1656773132821491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395540312335554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801996916502463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2321887035727861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16378874449525185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17294081183314133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747382948117405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LanSukasa,2020/04/09,"My anger issues have strongly hindered my overall enjoyment of life I've been suffering from anger issues throughout my entire life, and I just want them to go away. They're the cause of many things bad about me like my bipolar depression. I lost my job a week ago because I had an anger outburst when the DM kept nagging me to do everything exactly the way she wanted me to do, and now I'm once again out of work for god knows how long, and BOY, what an awful time to lose a job with all this COVID-19 madness going on.  
  
I used to play video games a lot, but nowadays, I hardly put more than a few hours into any game at all unless it's something super casual like Animal Crossing. It's because I'm afraid of ragequitting and breaking something expensive in the process, then having this feeling of complete regret for the next week. It has happened so many times in my life that it's actually killing my interest in what used to be my biggest hobby. I wish I could enjoy competitive multiplayer games, and I wish I could enjoy more challenging games. But any time I think about playing these kinds of games, I get anxious and won't even bring myself to start the game up, but when I do actually start a game up, I get even more anxious and stop playing within about an hour.  
  
My whole family has been concerned about me for many years with how many anger outbursts I've had. I want to get this all sorted out, but I have no idea where to start. I was seeing a therapist for over a year and made almost no progress in improving my mental health.  
  
I just needed to vent about this because god damn, it has been frustrating me for way too long and has ruined my enjoyment in life as a whole. Any help would be greatly appreciated.",10.656868618107561,6.844154941002955,9.791209439528023,71.31028590878152,60.06194690265487,12.908645336963925,40.53120036305877,10.389873798559362,3.973321125482188,1371,49,268,21,13,437,179,339,0.16,0.649,0.191,0.9091,2,0,2,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,7,18,33,9,1,17,1,22,6,0,6,4,50,49,21,1,10,7,0,2,2,0,2,6,0,0,1,14,14,0,2,4,12,1,5,3,17,0,0,9,3,36,16,47,34,10,47,0,6,1,0,11,17,1,3,24,175,50,4,0.0,0.0,0.17238027551562504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07829267475520504,0.0,0.08844234711761807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18018723371328765,0.0,0.0,0.19955884420834508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298201017231463,0.0,0.07374569959874241,0.16152195060365726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907316617243437,0.0,0.0,0.09260458808965334,0.0,0.0,0.14103685256057116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607214435851174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11667251683797344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07937867700448238,0.0,0.08326270690789994,0.0,0.04465857115836376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13843477283932987,0.0,0.10039156223103562,0.0,0.0,0.0973760018576267,0.0,0.0,0.07810340238030154,0.0,0.07911972040933977,0.0,0.0,0.09388281635561747,0.0,0.0,0.05920079133785861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17395998160827586,0.0,0.0,0.09970548885104842,0.0,0.1843717395285702,0.17529314659507328,0.0,0.09771589445178704,0.09197441869715328,0.048539802864347004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495395179122705,0.08629994289889087,0.0,0.0,0.1563254811087668,0.0,0.09881042125226336,0.09641457463505827,0.07508873423497163,0.0,0.08357299988417638,0.0,0.35818110110911583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900842863044607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06549010460790157,0.0,0.0,0.0939321098165652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406070921178536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08878862934031792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038169405701654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13599013795435794,0.0,0.0,0.18754561798175387,0.0,0.0,0.07384166628365152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025493708664942,0.05867762505919311,0.056593569457497814,0.0,0.0,0.1545048923633117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15256477369873192,0.0,0.0,0.15628491131820274,0.1402127715147356,0.14169415863608184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972181051355975,0.20313331142357768,0.0,0.0,0.06429992026873242,0.0,0.0,0.06274185611561651,0.0,0.0,0.11375374477221728
mentalhealth,JaelleJaen,2020/04/10,(URGENT) how ti help my scared friend who does self harm im rn ina a call with two friends one who just told us alot of shit and she is panicing she is crying and she doesnt know what to do I DONT KNOW WHAT TO DO its late here and she is scared that when she leaves rhe call to sleep she will do it a,-1.7601449275362313,0.10991936231884304,-0.2869565217391301,110.77507246376813,94.5072463768116,3.066666666666667,10.565217391304348,3.1291,-2.3450173913043475,232,2,66,0,9,72,48,69,0.198,0.691,0.111,-0.7906,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,1,0,0,0,4,7,1,3,3,0,9,2,2,1,0,9,12,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,9,2,5,10,1,2,0,0,0,0,16,0,1,1,2,42,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3899694257347484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20975328059292114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671045571003904,0.0,0.22379589562099134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950601579415543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127992000558374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20626237798737634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20988592668841136,0.0,0.2154036880260375,0.20219201854422852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939492699591867,0.0,0.0,0.2240426045853722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3823552164552797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19920598192207867,0.0,0.19601086231590464,0.0,0.0,0.1910912470253287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18246410217576114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865336693144214,0.0,0.2296933599292588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MissOverDiagnosed,2020/04/10,"They Wanted to Call if Fibromyalgia But I Would Not Let Them I sustained injury and my symptoms were disbelieved and I left one city for another; one province for another province and nerve conduction tests indicated denervation and an MRI indicated bilateral sacral fractures; an MRI I was dissuaded to have. These sacral fractures garnered the attention of medical professionals caring for me. 

Sweet Jesus, I would learn that I have severe osteoporosis weighing 46.7 kilos and shrunk a half an inch to 5'3"". I recall how dismissed I felt when Dr. Irvin Cohen, nephrologist at the Mayo Clinic said to me December 2017 ""You're fit, stretch and exercise"" when I explained my aches and pains to him and I reassured him that I engage in these activities daily. 

Severe Osteoporosis is a metabolic disorder that has existed for several several years and some medications exacerbate metabolic disease. 

We never quite fully understand what the side effects of medications will be especially when we are vulnerable.

We know our bodies; we are acutely aware of our bodies and our minds and healthcare professionals, of which I was one once, can be horribly unkind to patients with psychiatric labels or simply to those who are prescribed psychiatric medications. 

Healthcare professionals, despited their ""academic"" designations, are extremely biased, judgemental and formulate opinions far too quickly without gathering enough medical evidence to make an accurate diagnosis.",12.573070921985815,12.913292374468089,11.680691489361706,46.197916666666686,52.91489361702129,16.173758865248228,49.37056737588652,14.672994598444667,8.265843971631206,1208,70,146,49,12,391,154,235,0.105,0.838,0.055999999999999994,-0.8748,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,7,0,3,2,6,6,0,0,9,0,18,15,2,3,1,38,26,19,0,4,5,0,1,0,0,3,12,1,0,0,9,17,1,0,7,1,0,0,3,2,0,4,5,3,28,4,20,15,2,14,1,0,0,0,18,8,0,4,6,113,37,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23534435426151676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2493016556851591,0.0,0.0,0.11458889670831528,0.0,0.11441549924001156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861353897008426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595298484003765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774854433806726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061673031747330576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12192707080550085,0.1147522825124374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490754474493796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5652478862380105,0.0,0.0,0.11330994245035997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08655077802718099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951035568905798,0.2281289908229973,0.0,0.11940971048930155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193595019422568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674666637622764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5071054354595154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663927319522567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682470213820713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619010742100262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817582030433157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15943536049863266,0.0,0.0,0.07226583029519966
mentalhealth,Shojishi,2020/04/10,"I want to end myself and my insomnia got worse during quarantine what should I do? I've been suffering for insomnia for the last 3 years It's just that instead of getting all the sleep I want during these days it just got worse. I only sleep for 4 hours and when I get the chance to sleep for 7 hours there wouldnt be a time where I wont woke up in middle of the night. Its just depressing i could only imagine my future self as an adult to be painful if things like anxiety won over me and wont let my body rest. I tried everything to cure chronic insomnia and anxiety and I tried explaining my condition to my parents but they took it so lightly. College is coming and ofcourse  attending uni far away from home, living by myself , new environment and everything will stress me out. I just want my body to collapse. Help me.",3.160129870129872,5.029986818181822,4.239155844155846,85.66159090909092,74.75757575757575,8.108225108225108,26.331168831168828,8.841846274778883,2.0079350649350647,655,24,132,14,14,213,105,165,0.126,0.795,0.079,-0.8271,1,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,1,9,6,0,1,6,0,12,10,5,0,1,24,24,12,0,7,6,1,0,1,0,5,5,0,1,2,8,9,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,4,0,0,6,1,22,2,20,9,2,22,0,2,0,0,6,8,0,1,12,88,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20465416580951085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12567321146838314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971574582888433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11522357731256785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10679757070161516,0.0,0.0,0.08626501867052287,0.0,0.11520847307709844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847287247164227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404321910387518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397695913888498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21396237588560055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965742759724724,0.0,0.13417356162486685,0.0,0.2634560130598858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903337048190616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367800647393339,0.0,0.0653490494573493,0.0,0.1181137414581582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918756589770375,0.0,0.12552598569822926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20346310074645196,0.14233152991498493,0.0,0.14852617321035194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13954228251141107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4015739164142669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532231988635435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886511145263554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07799733127117554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14861380520616954,0.18163038153805428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23668776724768706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726285297666906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08613793756257347
mentalhealth,helpme_tounderstand,2020/04/10,"As of late, I’ve come to notice that I (F15) exhibit covert narcissistic tendencies and I desperately need advice as to how I can stop myself from escalating these habits any further I would like to preface this post by saying that I understand the fact that I am by no means a professional and cannot tell for sure if I am a narcissist or truly do exhibit narcissistic habits; however I have made sure to study the matter as much as I can to get a good understanding of what I believe to be acting as. For years, I’ve scoured the internet and countless books to look for some sort of explanation as to why I act the way I do and why I feel the way I feel, but nothing has opened my eyes up more than the subject of covert narcissism. I apologize for any misinformation I may share.

All my life, I’d been a rather quiet child. Due to being raised in a household in which I was not nurtured properly in and experiencing sexual exploitation from an older brother at a young age, I’ve found myself to be very withdrawn growing up. Because of this, I would always stick with the kids that were willing to take initiative; people that would be willing to reach out to the damn mute that couldn’t speak up. One friend in particular that stuck by me for years had a manipulative and critical mother herself; she’d take out her frustrations on me and project her own insecurities onto me. She’d criticize me for every little thing I did, whether it be choosing an ugly set of clothes that day or failing to successfully do a handstand. I’d eventually become heavily insecure and hypersensitive to what others thought about me. Since elementary, the girl’s been put into counseling and she’s been doing well for herself. I’m truly glad for her, though I wish I could say the same for me. Not to say I’m not doing well, but I want to be able to stop being so superficial. 

I’d constantly get agitated thinking about what other people might have thought about me. So much so that my paranoia would cause me to keep myself from trying new things or speaking up; I refused to put myself out there no matter what. I kept to myself and a few friends, those of which, I hadn’t gotten the chance to open up to other than on a surface level. I would never admit it then, but in hindsight, I’d always compare myself to them. I’d see them letting everyone in our grade get to know and play with them, be recognized for how great they were. I always scorned at their likability and capabilities in comparison to mine, believing that if I truly got the chance to show myself off that I would be better than them; but I’d always end up cowering away in fear of being noticed for how less I was compared to them. It pained me to feel as if I were superior to them at those times; I didn’t want it to go around that I was an egoist, so to combat my feelings of superiority, I instead put myself down. It would be a constant internal battle between making myself feel like a hidden gem to the world’s worst abomination that didn’t have a place on this earth. I abhorred the thought of me being outed as an egoist, so I would openly put myself down in front of my friends. It would range from little things like my ability to draw to things like my place in friendships or family. Friends would often show overwhelming support and care, but looking at it now, it just seems like a huge ploy to get people to give me positive reaffirmation. To show me that there were people who cared about me. At one point, I tried chalking this behavior up to me being an adolescent at the time, but as friends had felt comfortable enough to open up to me, I realized I am an anomaly. That my feelings are wrong and that I’m a manipulative power freak that thinks I’m better than others. That manipulates and exploits others, not being able to form any genuine bonds with anybody because there’s always some underlying purpose for my actions. (Post-Vent Author’s Note: To clarify, I am not directing this anger and these insults to anybody who is a narcissist or exhibits narcissistic traits, this was pent-up frustration towards my own past actions and behavior. I apologize for any offense I might have caused) Not only would I internally put down those around me, but I would have these daydreams playing out in my head; scenarios ranging from me either being picked out and mentioned especially for my contributions or conversations going well in my favor to me establishing my point of view in an argument or opening up to people about how I truly feel about myself. I never go around to executing these daydreams, but at times, they are what have given me a sense of hope. It’s truly pathetic.

This discovery wouldn’t have hit me as hard if it didn’t affect my personal relationships. When high school first started, I was as every kid was; confused and unprepared. But after a while, everybody seemed to go along with it. They didn’t necessarily understand everything, but they learned how to deal with not understanding. They powered through their insecurities and took initiative to better themselves. They found people that they can trust and stick with. I always stuck around in my own group, but I wasn’t ever able to connect with others. I’d always see friends coupling off with their one close best friend that I’d never have; when I attempted to form a close coupling of my own, I’d always back out or shut my mouth before I could let myself grow any closer emotionally. This has grown to be a habit I can’t drop; even during quarantine, I’ve found myself opening up and trying to stay optimistic, but nevertheless, I still find myself backing away from being able to form steady relatiomships with my peers. A friendship of mine that recently formed from someone willing to reach out and talk to me has been going really well, yet I still can’t find the courage in me to not become blunt or absent at times because the thought of establishing a closer relationship with someone overwhelms me.

Writing all this reminds me of how much of a coward I am, pushing all my blame and regrets ono my past experiences, acknowledging my faults yet not being able to change my ways for the better. Over the past few years, I’ve been trying my best to improve and make up for all the wrong I’ve done in the last. When freshman year first began, I made it a point to become more open with my feelings and outgoing; to let myself loose. And for a while I thought I did, but everything eventually caught up to me because all I really did was evade my own personal problems. Up until the second semester, it kept getting harder and harder to keep up this facade and at this point, I don’t want to deceive anyone further. This self-quarantine isolation time was really what I needed to open my eyes and keep me away from endangering anyone else with my selfish, manipulative behavior. I don’t know what about me is real anymore, I don’t know if the me writing this right now is genuinely coming from me, the child stuck in my body, or if this is coming from the false-self that I’ve developed from exploiting others for so long. I want to be able to be a real person; I want to enjoy life, make strong, close bonds with my friends and family. Hell, I have a little brother and a dog and I can’t help from eluding either of them. I try to keep away from them so as not to harm them anymore emotionally than I already had, but I can’t even grow close with either of them. I hear and see their disappointment in me as a sister and as an owner, but nothing I do is working. I just so desperately want answers and I want to change, but I feel like I’m on my own. Nobody else I know is aware of these feelings, and as of right now, I have no access to any counselors that can guide me through this. So I’m asking somebody, please, lead me in the right direction. Not for me, but for the sake of everybody else I know. For all I know, this could have been some scheme for me to garner other people’s attention and sympathy. I can’t tell if these words are really coming from me, but what I can tell is that I need help. Please.",9.650554782358306,7.237841768488746,9.412360704516008,68.91829629985125,60.57556270096463,12.473292700484715,38.32149541680664,10.900842039488845,3.993595191246341,6430,235,1196,124,67,2102,520,1555,0.11699999999999999,0.733,0.15,0.9941,4,3,0,0,1,0,143.0,1,0,21,16,55,73,8,7,64,0,128,8,5,20,13,268,230,112,0,39,53,4,12,6,8,19,3,9,0,8,86,82,0,9,43,6,0,27,34,27,4,6,53,30,195,46,255,128,35,192,1,5,8,0,81,106,2,29,58,904,281,12,0.21080520150267812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034332733856783336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03877146364360217,0.0,0.2338757532037693,0.0,0.0,0.14335476584020065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968737161441663,0.04913329945191478,0.035999140124277365,0.0,0.1251075484236517,0.03284573446576182,0.0,0.13203895072977154,0.05403206257567735,0.0,0.08566992947526156,0.11640889146808488,0.029896616657006495,0.0791684245814081,0.07374235110988801,0.1242933798840844,0.0,0.03902617603976783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164331745405937,0.07218500363617279,0.07433465047253998,0.12106001008424698,0.0,0.0759351776348497,0.0,0.08415540001226211,0.0777506486278998,0.0,0.022658652581671258,0.036221817720654234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035954485189987645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805034796142308,0.0790424926953649,0.031118473038769186,0.036303020822442335,0.0,0.04641161581377103,0.03178089559745385,0.05920415807326487,0.03357223398237566,0.06315270743758213,0.03436798956939388,0.0662427942647473,0.03953574317085615,0.17764907311224976,0.050199759358128065,0.03373434201878401,0.0,0.06422404503840601,0.05977026556943031,0.0,0.11556851133769695,0.21715676767474293,0.0,0.09178084760109932,0.033703926343243824,0.09983787835145584,0.02946890023923403,0.02810002951055638,0.03873557981073997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03147334236417281,0.0,0.03605782567397561,0.0,0.03959879715814908,0.0,0.04709942766143625,0.03712121156604567,0.0,0.03489618840283861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249155660063416,0.0,0.0,0.11585302571357743,0.028639062503354663,0.0396329082205488,0.0,0.0,0.10778130051293076,0.04963264935726699,0.10298877327218382,0.1056410962096043,0.0,0.031092661612840137,0.05900775887185755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06648965957278986,0.07035705446612713,0.0,0.0,0.0382714440164806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454366850819473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748303933091423,0.07815469290561328,0.08129298356365577,0.03393282953694037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742442542984814,0.08000103970608903,0.0,0.0,0.07142353010985532,0.0267211424981628,0.03738526621177679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061870897002546,0.1705034145170121,0.09203348540823374,0.07341552265676611,0.07713360254534052,0.13285270245517716,0.0,0.06729770369989498,0.0,0.0,0.033618684662289185,0.0,0.17659787691461484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998082348066543,0.09003147337220084,0.0,0.034690784125815395,0.07544196492318178,0.0,0.09001324513161743,0.0,0.08382037866808491,0.0,0.03555768637888185,0.0839922262780946,0.06396971271945735,0.07330526669114137,0.0,0.0,0.02906337351397668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059538187714827925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0248681677720022,0.0374483827128828,0.0561164354094062,0.058747529229438884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03986987408509664,0.06622713587972996,0.0,0.05283309216632934,0.028239539301457024,0.09212651886435576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09336640589981383,0.04502515372731676,0.034519173359985424,0.1394631523530155,0.10243517353894628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03903538923312624,0.11926907850289067,0.0,0.0,0.14630376613934454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028989394757732524,0.14506143122417112,0.0836636783891847,0.0,0.0,0.12635946189189956,0.0,0.06340630190152226,0.0,0.040402596362358316,0.0,0.0,0.02557811622863036,0.0,0.0,0.2994999337015902,0.07682746502941368,0.0,0.09050109216513604
mentalhealth,thisderpyguy,2020/04/10,"Monster energy drinks I have been up and down with monsters off and on. A pattern I’ve started to notice is every time I drink 2+ a day I am much less depressed. Is this placebo? Caffeine? Something in monster? Some reaction with the like 9 medicines I take every night? I have no clue, and wanted to know if anyone else has the same problems or a solution. If you need any more info and think you can help, please comment and tell me. Thanks in advance.

P.S. I have been diagnosed with depression so please don’t comment saying that I don’t really have it.",1.3385714285714272,3.952946181818184,2.7070129870129875,89.64909090909094,87.18181818181819,5.324675324675325,24.22077922077921,6.868970318607317,1.1194415584415585,440,18,84,6,14,142,79,110,0.102,0.7390000000000001,0.159,0.6655,0,0,3,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,0,1,1,5,0,0,5,0,13,3,0,0,0,19,20,9,0,5,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,8,2,0,3,2,0,1,3,3,0,0,2,1,10,2,11,18,5,11,0,2,0,0,7,6,0,4,5,57,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585705448170512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940844295777446,0.18963076867494694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935778719623362,0.0,0.3188089129212259,0.1878467933643059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.362605241115408,0.0,0.0,0.15460605548150236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31186661585327663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12405158346497458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10171214388057133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041808671481467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13605110433997586,0.1372304490244485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17367994720768892,0.0,0.0,0.2107086252878262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4063126033245604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17709136919221127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185635090280589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717872688607855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14247944636907495,0.0,0.0,0.13099673364037007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915304427256048,0.0,0.16176333219149333,0.17039179905066065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858831185332548,0.0,0.0,0.10791847044392093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10916177685341197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jenp2323,2020/04/10,"I work in a Psychiatric Center. I work in a Psychiatric Center and would love to dispell any assumptions, generalizations, or stereotypes about mental health hospitals! (Disclaimer: I am not a doctor, or a licensed therapist, please do not take me medical questions. If you are suicidal or know someone who is, call 911).",7.648888888888887,9.882394814814816,7.5935185185185174,64.66583333333335,63.814814814814824,11.325925925925928,39.425925925925924,11.20814326018867,5.43145925925926,256,14,36,8,4,82,42,54,0.081,0.7959999999999999,0.12300000000000001,0.3164,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,0,5,4,0,0,0,11,8,5,1,2,6,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,4,7,0,4,0,0,0,1,5,4,0,5,0,26,6,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17139625244311668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573616348349349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25797423638690103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679073743553158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851492362407958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274764839490746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539043908582274,0.2539976465932735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2766648950153183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28234315684116323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21355318447420585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756915111331877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18950316613229576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29263856536391697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3669771206096016,0.0,0.0,0.17904241251607989,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ccwandco,2020/04/10,"Lack of focus Ok. I’m just posting this here because I don’t know what other subreddit I’d post to for this type of question.

I’ve been unable to focus on anything for a very, very long time. It wasn’t always this way, but somewhere around age 11 or 12 I stopped being able to focus on homework. I always attributed this inability to focus to the fact that the work was getting more difficult and I simply didn’t want to do it. Basically - just lazy. As of now, I struggle with being distracted while I’m trying to work 24/7 - especially since I’m stuck at home because of the virus. The problem with my original reasoning behind my focus problems is that it isn’t just things I don’t like that I have trouble focusing on. For example, I play guitar, and I like playing guitar, but it’s extremely difficult for me to focus on just playing for even five minutes at a time. I’ve also noticed that even while watching a television show I enjoy, I can’t focus enough and will always have to be doing something else as I am watching, usually on my phone. Sometimes I will spend hours doing a pointless task such as making a random list rather than do anything else, even if I’m able to do something I enjoy. thought that my lack of focus on things I enjoyed stemmed from my depression, but I’ve been on medication for that for about three months. My sense of self has improved but the focus has not. I’m not sure this has anything to do with depression or not, but I was wondering if anybody knew what could be causing this? I’d assume it has to be something to do with my brain. I’ve recently started my first year of college and it’s really becoming an issue now because I have much more work than ever before. I don’t know, maybe I am just lazy, but if there’s something I could possibly do to help this I would really like to know.",6.405573770491806,5.909026743169397,7.119131147540988,76.61623770491805,65.72131147540983,9.942950819672133,34.14699453551913,9.3871,3.0341315846994537,1452,58,277,24,20,483,165,366,0.141,0.741,0.11800000000000001,-0.892,0,0,4,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,4,18,20,0,2,11,1,39,2,1,5,3,55,55,21,0,12,20,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,2,1,24,9,0,1,9,6,1,0,10,9,0,3,9,2,30,11,51,36,6,31,0,2,2,0,4,10,0,9,21,200,54,6,0.200487716213786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08016497711097392,0.2502327609389321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474764616751421,0.08923828664722812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833231764163298,0.1107114655191196,0.08530013993994523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190529828163223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297805571735093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600731275627627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17267977619740546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16748176087477262,0.0,0.0,0.10357870229678154,0.0,0.19863036857178154,0.09067630872686988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08526737449612452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05237327844818715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719134503921009,0.0,0.10055276306581147,0.0,0.09872000764778208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046285436916225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16527420843652954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692225667451486,0.0,0.0,0.08871265993434951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691355369266623,0.0,0.10070842915867877,0.0,0.0,0.10098514085394357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001369115872978,0.0,0.07369076991471005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412829686651565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300988809906938,0.19201181220928154,0.0,0.0,0.19183966795908966,0.0,0.0,0.11229606296439534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12843756478792706,0.10306738172487746,0.0989787163714055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045762063785893,0.0,0.0,0.08292275531746866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086904777699399,0.09914373889653186,0.0,0.07095311872036497,0.0,0.0,0.08380835400019676,0.0,0.1047966457683838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447864992841597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319513007632228,0.0,0.0,0.07958242598926428,0.11690599960376367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805899947491624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040444735914368,0.1654233626485878,0.05912642474025163,0.07956890859772843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10871018800023008,0.21893616780121786,0.0,0.0,0.07121036066234031,0.0,0.0,0.06455375799685012
mentalhealth,petrajacob0,2020/04/10,"Help? I‘m 18 and I am doing social service in Germany at a very secluded village. I have very to little personal social interaction since the last 5 months. I‘m still finding my way to life. There’s a lot of pressure coming from everywhere. I‘ve been giving a lot and expecting less but I can‘t handle it no more, sometimes i just have suicidal thoughts, thinking would that change people behavior. I just need someone to talk, someone who thinks about me. idk anymore",3.213048128342248,6.310773000000001,3.8048128342246015,81.54711229946524,83.70588235294117,6.385026737967914,28.903743315508017,7.686295010490155,2.4488823529411756,375,18,60,7,11,118,69,85,0.14400000000000002,0.8140000000000001,0.042,-0.8658,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,0,7,1,0,0,0,15,15,3,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,7,0,8,12,4,8,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,2,3,41,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18155008892444646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19365721637671,0.15769324546775282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16731698753577495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756114682750654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12270379958562405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149221422009298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12930336868241954,0.0,0.1834780101149341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112685755879093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14611977060910789,0.0,0.0,0.13573948065641145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269133820718222,0.1598442402863798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514322587771497,0.0,0.0,0.37322096017839945,0.3102187103234423,0.0,0.18105476919133426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461949791286577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20024207375186345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14713974003015184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23459976961852186,0.0,0.14533220079797407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3020935974025704,0.0,0.14530751554571478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13004326402504374,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kurriizma,2020/04/10,"I’ve been doubting my artistic abilities lately Fashion Design and Illustration has been the greatest medium for me to deal with depression. Recently I have been coming up with all new designs, illustrations, concepts etc. but it seems as if I’m not capturing anyone’s attention or making an impact on anyone’s life. Even with everything that’s going on, I still want to be able to bring innovation to peoples lives in these tough times. My optimism is slowly diminishing, since I had a mental breakdown over my recent OC’s not receiving any type of recognition, I feel as if no one truly cares about the designs I was putting out. Feedback wether it is positive or negative is truly what keeps me going, but when I send my peers new designs and art for them to just turn around and ignore them completely really ruins my self-esteem. I practice everyday and put a lot of work and effort into all my work, but what does it even amount to? Has any artist or designer ever had this feeling before?",6.603387096774195,7.611633048387103,7.1399462365591395,71.47991935483873,65.29032258064517,10.286021505376343,32.704301075268816,10.317481424215053,3.603965591397849,801,32,132,19,12,263,126,186,0.10400000000000001,0.738,0.157,0.8999,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,3,8,6,0,1,5,0,13,1,0,1,3,36,26,16,0,3,11,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,12,0,2,4,3,0,8,4,5,0,1,6,2,17,1,24,19,6,26,0,2,0,0,5,8,0,8,10,96,25,4,0.14993786559248432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039257803827672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20968008370257096,0.0,0.0,0.13347648905081025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1275860801735858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15287164680644705,0.0,0.0,0.12915819480198654,0.1572069993864498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545793556762666,0.12914126392870007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121163659342885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16722035442042896,0.1980650922522937,0.13562738353320772,0.0,0.0,0.13475448554514025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15162617994468525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1704262886713547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13327166416738062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16913644322205448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059055486574546,0.0,0.0,0.13239788230720306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274718114979163,0.0,0.0,0.1000846895695906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110210275487204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896218498223997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016017781479286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394803706391716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3014579360736149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960540360770193,0.0,0.2960911072673877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13649780156299385,0.15641789404638487,0.0,0.0,0.12403015183325375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974057314479472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742997519535232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16308934202265762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843723788259095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183131038053782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whatimidoingggg,2020/04/10,"I am completely lost, please help... (advice/opinions needed) TW: depiction of child mental abuse and of very negative and painful memories / feelings

I really need help, so whoever feels like it, please? (Sorry all of this is longer than what I intended it to, but it is literally the summary of 19years worth of life heh)




Sooo the story begun when I was 3, I went to school for the first time of my life. As I was a ""weirdly demanding child"" according to the teatchers, my parents got me tested by a psychiatrist and they discovered that I was intellectually gifted. So now that they would understand how I functioned, things should have gone smoothly, right? Right.

Life goes by, I am left handed and I experience a fair amount of injustice from the teatchers (the hand of the deviiillll noooo) but this is still not the problem, as a child I did not give much attention to these kind of rude treatments by the adult at school, I kinda grew used to it. I was 4-5 years old at that time.

Then comes the real problem. I was 7 and met the person that was literally going to ruin my life. This evil woman was my teatcher, and as my parents did with my previous teatchers, they explained to her that I might be a little different from the other students and that I was writing slowly because I was younger than the others (I jumped a class, forgot to mention it). She played nice, and this b*tch (can I curse?) then proceeded to make me feel like the most worthless piece of human garbage ever conceived. I am going to summarize what I have gone through to make it short, here we go:

- verbal humiliations in front of the whole class (like half an hour explaining to me that I was a liar pretending I was gifted, that I was a fraud and that I should be ashamed of myself)
- never letting me speak, and if she did, it was to scream on me afterwards because no matter what I said she absolutely hated it
- excluding me from the class by using any reason she could find (I eventually started to do everything I could to get excluded because the hallways felt more welcoming than staying in her sight)
- she made me write more than the others as a punition, often giving me stuff to copy while she was giving class I was actually interested in

It is hard to summarize everything, there is much more but I am still recovering memories today, 12 years after, and those I have are mostly feeling of fear and deep emotional pain.
I never talked about it to my parents, it is my grandmother who noticed that something was off and talked about it to my parents. I only spent half of the year in her class, but that was enough to cause damage.

Around that time, I have distinct memories of wanting to ""end everything"" a lot of questionnements of dying and thoughts of ""trying to fly through the window"" (the point of it being dying as my parents had warned me about it before, since we were living on the 3rd floor). 

From that point on, I had no sense of self worth, self love, or even inner peace, I lived because I was supposed to but not much gave me a spark of happiness, my family did, books did, but everything outside the house was always bringing me pain somehow.
But looking back on it, I am proud of the young me for carrying on so well, I never gave up on anything and it might be what made me do so well for a long time.

Middle school added trauma again since all my friends turned my back on them because I was two years younger than them. They picked on all the things I hated about myself and made my insecurities worse. 

Again, I was lucky to have very loving and caring parents who agreed to let me out of school and to be homeschooled. Since I had jumped two classes, I passed my last two years of middle school in three years (one year and a half for each class) to enable me to go back to highschool with a smaller one year age gap with the other students. 

During those years, I really drowned into what I call the ""dark episodes"" everything feels numb (or hurt), the world loses its colours, I can't focus on anything and nothing seems interesting. I had a few of these episodes, but never expressed with words how I felt, only being a difficult child. The best way to describe it would be a blinding emotional pain that would not allow me to think or feel anything else, the thought that I was going crazy and then nothing. Just a feeling of exhaustion and emptiness that would last for some time. A few days or a few weeks, it depended how much I wanted to pick myself up. 

Then high school. That was also bad (who is surprised at this point?). I somehow managed to make friends with a narcissist pervert. She isolated me from my family, making me believe that they didn't want to help me and that she was the only one who would. Not going to lie here, she helped me a bit, giving me the presence I needed when I needed it, but the relationship grew extremely toxic afterwards. I was feeling worthless, disgusting and lonely, which was just another dark episode that I was in fact masking. A lot of panick attacks, fainting, insomnia was going on during that period, which was not helping with getting better grades. 

Eventually I got my diploma and got out of this living hell.
During the summer I worked extremely hard on my mental health and it got really good, especially thanks to my religion and spirituality (which is the only thing on this planet that gives me peace).

Now in university, I found friends that I genuinely care about and am really happy. But! The dark episodes didn't stop... I thought that it was normal that I got them on anniversary dates, around September and November, and I had found a pretty good way to handle it. But right now I am in a big one, and none of my coping mechanisms can do it because they involve going out or meeting with people (basically fake it till you make it, works for me most of the time).

So now here I am, feeling that things are slowly going downhill in the darkness, and I can't do anything about it, it seems beyond my control this time...

So if anyone thinks that I might have something specific (so I could research it to understand it) or would have some coping mechanisms to share that would be amazing! 
I might need to go to a therapist after this but can't bring myself to trust them sooo... what should I do?

I only started to come to terms with myself recently about the fact that yes, my mental health is fucked up, no I can't fix all of it myself and that I might actually have something.
Depression seems a close match but I don't want to self diagnose myself.... 

But yeah to make it short, I know I could just find other coping mechanisms and get over it, and keep monitoring how I feel to make sure that I don't become and empty feelingless doll again, but i don't want to. I find it exhausting to control myself all the time. I want to live and not survive. I am fed up with all of this.


To whoever read all of this : thank you so much for your time, you have a beautiful soul, and any insight and thought on my situation is welcome! (do not be afraid to trigger me, sometimes it makes me recover some memories of the trauma and it helps me a lot somehow)
Have a beautiful day / night 💜",6.912675438596491,6.702390179824567,7.016695906432747,76.81631578947369,64.59941520467837,10.123976608187137,33.058479532163744,9.682069395223575,2.9659961988304087,5618,206,1061,100,76,1807,493,1368,0.14300000000000002,0.718,0.139,-0.9137,7,2,3,1,1,0,186.0,2,4,10,12,54,73,9,4,72,3,119,23,2,27,16,227,223,89,3,30,34,6,17,3,3,15,17,3,1,11,105,61,1,5,34,4,3,23,26,38,2,12,70,24,167,35,172,123,36,155,2,9,4,3,85,58,2,32,74,808,272,24,0.0,0.04168402315249255,0.06866364149380122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02813442939321976,0.029273614647458014,0.0,0.0,0.047848906844439584,0.03689060351767871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02459954492606774,0.0,0.11580466995946236,0.0626375348769271,0.0,0.040023745796011,0.0,0.08115661876601367,0.029374870551814525,0.12867696465218492,0.0388549217117055,0.02993664878179865,0.03963721628591865,0.036920546743596655,0.031114952756873964,0.03840880832910948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0359239852535178,0.0,0.07173924918632689,0.036140830348147815,0.0,0.060611055842731326,0.036886866657158415,0.0,0.07891751691794861,0.11235744754051474,0.0,0.0,0.045377985876359515,0.0,0.030301555281039567,0.035708223721467744,0.07302515705449156,0.036756913702352234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029389416337389392,0.0791483320606605,0.03116014125194265,0.03635163124135927,0.0,0.023236880914533468,0.03182345080673253,0.0,0.0,0.15809317521348254,0.0344140089455354,0.0663314945961932,0.03958868226501935,0.17788694851954515,0.05026697776796407,0.06755902585818073,0.0,0.0964650633407338,0.029925149532389086,0.0,0.07714883981342048,0.0815428292319728,0.03252449465130988,0.05514224631607551,0.16874528263197955,0.19994312624850288,0.05901671928760281,0.14068827985901164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490218026104142,0.06303097150792364,0.06946839286236332,0.0,0.07479203784061922,0.0,0.0,0.14148748400870026,0.03717091755755958,0.0,0.0,0.034646440190705584,0.040594433894389464,0.0376622510473271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0312707075671307,0.0,0.036635853453254666,0.01933469251100717,0.05735482147957231,0.0,0.0,0.038224526279984544,0.07195041445032371,0.0993982167925647,0.05156333857589036,0.035260850532953296,0.12426273764950188,0.031134295264035036,0.02954338567828998,0.0393588148088434,0.03840448547675579,0.08972951073974934,0.0635048954375026,0.09986803569220017,0.18787003698232496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636326253325136,0.18660870966093585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293113175986676,0.13043223915084448,0.10853578183734497,0.0,0.0,0.03301521574976915,0.03447015099926077,0.06751470798736336,0.04005408129181463,0.03691679913145443,0.0,0.09535889005705092,0.13378461302048725,0.1497413031094561,0.0,0.2343876588939557,0.0,0.0,0.02439024596496793,0.03071890665132492,0.0,0.07723688587128304,0.09977294601782373,0.0,0.0,0.03579197465816287,0.0,0.06732740141049559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035190766141615856,0.040043959644152236,0.09015202718665437,0.03617217990180956,0.03473723572986126,0.03777149155746984,0.0,0.0901337745381184,0.03346542098684428,0.0,0.0,0.21363179268684168,0.0,0.09608305402876494,0.11010513570644198,0.0,0.0,0.08730686973218864,0.03954519408734095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125272498196194,0.03479515147747048,0.03938252411474702,0.04980293342074893,0.03749852679263689,0.056191576358329394,0.02941309663091922,0.0,0.0,0.04027410916920475,0.0,0.0,0.033157907622153794,0.0,0.0,0.05655470513780651,0.0,0.06478032839245157,0.0,0.04084813773228694,0.09349142525084132,0.04508544324413657,0.0,0.11171991688273517,0.18463020504879915,0.0,0.03334770719080265,0.0,0.0,0.02388575640269336,0.038267092660455686,0.10310089473979098,0.07324983479930854,0.0,0.060770600896754574,0.0,0.05805642419111445,0.12450486100622217,0.055850470405283716,0.028220273117825004,0.0,0.06326432977874012,0.03261336713415815,0.0,0.039278604314244785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051224731602335226,0.0,0.03585269488115489,0.1749422323096066,0.0,0.0,0.2039001183177136
mentalhealth,m_eggnogg,2020/04/10,"I haven't been the same since I left him I haven't been the same since I left my 3 year relationship. I caught him cheating so I left but I haven't been able to fully regain happiness since then. I was extremely codependent on him and my entire life was revolved around him. It's been 7 months since it happened and I have finally learned how to live without him but I feel so empty. I decided to start sleeping with other people to try to move on but that has made things so much worse. I feel like I am never going to be happy again. I want to learn how to love myself and be happy without male attention but I can't do it. I've tried therapy but that doesn't work, I can't express my feelings verbally. I am so lost and it just keeps getting worse. I go through phases where I am doing great but then the depression comes back sooner or later and usually it's worse. I just want to be happy again.",1.3991274978891075,3.5490127967914447,3.0772980579791738,90.52975513650438,81.45989304812835,6.2897832817337465,21.60681114551084,7.475848149327749,0.7942363636363643,711,22,151,11,19,235,98,187,0.136,0.679,0.185,0.8996,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,13,10,1,0,3,0,22,3,1,3,1,35,38,20,0,2,11,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,9,8,0,1,7,0,0,5,9,3,0,0,9,3,29,7,16,26,3,24,0,2,0,1,9,7,0,1,13,109,38,3,0.11003107027604134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795098048724747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846071012296386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09478202422601628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476959959864774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16690504558593927,0.07860621859045132,0.0,0.12053365921117795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057486692854281776,0.0,0.1250663858097677,0.0,0.0,0.12130964342313698,0.0,0.0,0.09730011206191344,0.4685204813131362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978006708836402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3586472394044565,0.0,0.07771819894130337,0.05375562305283525,0.0,0.097159450916401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011191101143255,0.0,0.09930733682392756,0.10411405913516934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782575053669331,0.1169456144729875,0.0808854969900995,0.0,0.08486274459720146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762816899256283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118132191497938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3640753534481924,0.0,0.11011053339908676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07788055786819276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12583011816351328,0.0,0.07309975391323517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940774817657654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211836788365404,0.0,0.12979835211107754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21213205055640907,0.0,0.08010392962468031,0.0,0.33639318248581024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085640174742606
mentalhealth,tess615,2020/04/10,"Need new therapist. Maybe? So at my last therapy appt I flat out told my therapist i was having thoughts of killing my family and he completely glossed over it like i didnt even say it. 

It's important to me to be able to be honest about the dark stuff and actually talk about that kind of stuff so I can get better. 

I've been with this counselor for a few months and dread the thought of starting over with someone new but to have something like this get brushed off concerns me, like hes not very invested in my ""recovery"".

Should I give him another chance or cut it off and start over?",3.686148775894537,5.113138330508477,4.223333333333333,88.13569679849344,72.47457627118644,8.63427495291902,29.21280602636536,9.150863307647796,2.2742116760828623,465,19,100,10,9,147,82,118,0.06,0.8029999999999999,0.13699999999999998,0.8122,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,2,1,3,0,10,0,0,0,0,14,19,8,1,2,3,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,0,2,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,6,2,13,6,20,10,1,14,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,1,9,65,22,0,0.15817585779578106,0.0,0.15435682006688345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1658611785059823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398936921956275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16584437747724584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447366228206947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911412143902053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528071446104198,0.15173669593804642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17499815094798232,0.16471581513751374,0.0,0.12893443555407416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23183020304348498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15890890943616126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12625446060688394,0.0,0.0,0.117285394316555,0.0,0.3055344582306449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12578779083326438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13402189101030548,0.12177150310441873,0.0,0.0,0.2239153725490519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621470278675025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271357629012457,0.0,0.0,0.1808878785521732,0.36730872460815256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511479253501627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511438106013378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305116481974456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yea_thats_autistic,2020/04/10,"A vlog from inside the nuthouse I made [it](https://youtu.be/IKMA8rRoMn8) when I was locked up in the acute ward.
Tell me what you think.",4.1575000000000015,7.450103083333339,2.7716666666666683,89.44000000000004,80.66666666666666,6.533333333333335,20.5,7.793537801064563,0.9713500000000002,110,3,20,2,3,31,22,24,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,4,0,3,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,13,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6576925335554205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6075222722736026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44537312446640814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,squishy6987,2020/04/10,"Tw self harm for fun Tw self harm, not graphic 

Hi, f18 with an ADHD and emotional dysregulation diagnosis here, I used to self harm when I was younger usually when I was angry/frustrated or really low and depressed, but lately, particularly right now, I’m feeling really high and manic and I have the urge to cut myself just for fun? Like uhh does anyone experience this? I’m not really in any danger to myself, I’m just confused as hell but not too concerned because like uno how mania works lmao, I couldn’t give a crap about anything right now 🤣 anything anyone has to say on the topic? Cheers lads

also posted on an adhd thread",8.155765027322403,6.98642036885246,8.782622950819675,68.31142076502736,62.524590163934434,11.4120218579235,33.448087431693985,10.504223727775694,3.3994874316939887,503,16,90,10,6,170,82,122,0.212,0.616,0.172,-0.7196,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,1,11,15,4,1,5,0,5,1,1,2,0,18,11,12,0,1,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,10,0,0,2,2,7,5,12,8,0,14,1,2,0,0,6,7,2,2,8,50,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37718519046215343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549236034209665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10671395136140413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21945033346634354,0.0,0.2582707679749975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09565963817361554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515872815855245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373255718742332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17651879248395216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350214326543424,0.0,0.0,0.07934567547742973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505361528262213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16579921046857238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17701752217459665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15333063923371154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029016657953742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015893051310093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26802510559195863,0.0,0.12479255586453783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4911190190663034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355322697210832,0.1728300211722642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424280881659933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jamieo26,2020/04/10,"When I speak what isay comes out completely different Hi, I'm having a huge issue where when I speak its not what I think. 

I feel like I have no control over what I say and even if Im thinking something completely normal what comes out just sounds shitty.

I think I've been doing it for sometime but im not sure.

Its causing me huge issues in my relationship and I really want to fix this part of me.

I have mental health issues and my girlfriend thinks i may have autism and I think I might too, I don't know if this is related.

If anyone has any ideas on how to essentially take back control or just help me manage this better I would really appreciate it.



Cheers!",1.8127619047619064,4.12763605925926,3.3796031746031763,88.00750000000002,81.0,6.523809523809526,20.01322751322752,7.7094869923839395,0.7563227513227511,528,14,108,9,14,174,86,135,0.047,0.767,0.18600000000000005,0.963,1,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,9,4,0,0,1,0,12,1,0,4,1,35,24,12,0,6,9,0,1,1,1,3,1,4,0,0,11,8,0,2,8,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,5,19,4,9,20,1,13,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,6,4,74,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08946378766048603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198824420232528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115979635829304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11635214721025584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13514605809708607,0.0,0.2266507215063833,0.27587161535834953,0.0,0.2951064273712087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744985787085706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08689265929474009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06651955599179497,0.09398488956054604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13983974626257867,0.0,0.0,0.08818039296852283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14851269703183234,0.2842099110288319,0.4119363629229707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07230070400183224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427247597549211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13257927870170524,0.1395619927617495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288986717982303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14246423315753629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16855853872712806,0.0,0.0,0.14124379941649642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10462001057072896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127959047221644,0.13011398791262505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239916312578874,0.0,0.09891506246016747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4214845005848922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07759617500403697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345485766017983,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ineedtoventforonce,2020/04/10,"I think i need to Vent a bit I seriously need to vent out some things and need to put them into words. Any thoughts will be appreciated, so - here i go (Sorry for my english, not a native speaker here)

​

Im struggling currently, like i think most people with some thoughts of depression and just overall sadness. So, here is a rundown of what life has prepared for me, in the last few months that just kinda crushed me today.

​

Two years ago, in late october my mom died, quite suddenly after a hearth attack. Really harsh thing, but to be honest i am to some degree over it. Well, back then i had my GF to support me, but to be honest she didn´t really know how to. There is no helping, honestly. With loss there is none, certain holes can´t be filled just like that. But, anyways. We where together at that point with my GF for three years. A bumpy ride, but we kinda just somehow made it. So starting with that november, i was kinda down, but got back into life normally, i would say. Wounds heal, after some time passes. But yeah, my relationship got worse, worse, worse... we lived together, but had no feelings anymore. I was tired, all the time, and her crap and my crap was just... too much crap i guess. So, after a rough couple of months, with discussions and fighting and tears, we broke up. Before Christmas, last year. To be precise actually one day before my birthday. And i hate that day ever since my mom died. But, anyways... broke up, but decided to keep together till january, since... you know, we had a contract for the flat we lived in. And breaking these news to our families would break them. Or harm them. So - we kept it a secret. January came, i told my Dad, my only close relative still alive (In 26 Years of my life, i was on 8 Different burials. Some family, some good friends) that i will need to go back to live with him. Truth is i could live alone, but i am... too afraid to be alone, i guess. He took the news like a champ to be honest. No dumb questions, no nothing, just understanding, giving me a shoulder to talk to, and... well, middle of january i moved. Left her, left our dog (i miss the dog, i really really do) left the flat, the memories... and went back home. Moved in during a single weekend, built my room where my room was before in the flat of my parents. Actually, my dads. After i moved out to live with my GF, my parents reworked that room into their bedroom. So, after i came back, we had to renovate it. Lots of stuff from my mom still around, my dad never really went into the bedroom it seems. Her apron she used to wear while cooking still hung on the very same place she put it, before she passed away. Same place, still there. Throwing that away hurt, and i think it broke some wounds open that where... i dont know, if closed or just repressed. A few weeks went and came. Got stuck in a loop again, work home work home. Didn´t really talk to my colleagues either about it. They have their own issues, and i am horrible introvert. So, then this outbreak happened, without me using any day before that to socialize, talk to the few friends i have and that care. And now i am locked in this house, and it all comes crashing down on me like an avalanche. I can´t sleep, i nap during the day and stay up late. I read books and do my hobbies but... hell its not getting better. I wish i could go out, have some drinks with my colleagues and just talk. I crave for any interaction to be honest. I even wish and this sounds super wierd, for any interaction with the opposite gender. Is flirting the right word ? Idk. I am not outgoing, nor a flirter, i am not even good at any of these.   
I just feel burned out, absolutely on my ground, and nothing i do that helped before helps. My hobbies don´t mean shit. I can´t even play videogames because after an hour i just loose focus and the will to play more. All i really enjoy is drinking coffee. I feel trapped, and hurt, and i have no idea how long this will continue. I am not considering to end it, either... I love life, i truly do. But this pain just numbs me, makes me absolutely numb to everything. I help my dad as much as i can, i am worried as hell for him. He is 60 now, and has Diabetes. Smoker. He is in risk, i know that. If i get infected, he will too, since we live here together. The though of loosing him now scares me. Terrifies me. Its not even fear, its like a panic. I just have so much going on currently, and just... needed to vent. Loosing him would destroy the only thing i have left. I am pulling at straws to keep me going. To keep working. To keep my hobbies. And to talk to the few people i do, that i just can´t open up to. Its like a curse. I wish i could tell them, but i cant. I tried. I tried and tried, but only time it worked is when i was drunk... i am at my wits ends. Just numbly tulmbing trough each day till the sun goes down and rises again. I´d love to share this with someone. I think i didn´t get over the breakup properly. I wish i could just cry. I wish i could find someone again that would help me, be a bit of a crutch... worst thing is, that for most of my colleagues and friends, i am the crutch. I help everyone, i know what they are dealing with, and keep telling them to keep their hopes high and just push trough. Little do they know, nor will they know, that i am even in a worse situation. But i have to help them, too. They deserve it. They need it. And i do my best to stand beside them. And even although all of this, i can´t share my feelings with them. I don´t want to. Whatever the reason might be.  
So, this is my story, i guess. I just needed to vent all of this out, and hope it willl.... i don´t know even. Get me some little nugget of solitude in my hearth that it all will be beter. Someday. Sometimes. Not this year, but someday. Maybe.",1.8000250617049574,4.0126123205240205,2.772519460793621,92.91865008543765,80.37991266375545,5.904006075564839,21.135561040440482,7.079830092131019,0.44745969242453,4437,128,953,55,115,1405,409,1145,0.174,0.7020000000000001,0.124,-0.996,5,3,3,0,2,0,253.0,11,1,17,10,76,69,11,7,43,1,81,26,7,7,11,226,162,79,3,27,48,9,5,6,6,12,13,3,8,0,56,75,4,8,27,10,0,26,19,33,2,3,26,8,166,36,129,108,38,155,2,9,0,2,89,64,7,28,67,661,222,7,0.0,0.0,0.07416103337512048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03368288888145975,0.0,0.0,0.07870883059886702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08234152314067822,0.09234333357212286,0.1291995406977456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03768375478378784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03382623039998852,0.0,0.04322815223895854,0.07140064729001774,0.1460903854883572,0.0,0.023163196859775696,0.0,0.19400073411311786,0.0,0.039876502901856035,0.033606097778489406,0.08296783725491294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303785917239662,0.03874144115771644,0.0,0.0,0.03273186826000107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15169135068644196,0.042044007533900064,0.041738962430405216,0.1225276671852691,0.03917421665321685,0.03272757755963328,0.0,0.07887174335241849,0.03969976896859829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04453331291409938,0.07444704756460993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730980836684597,0.0,0.0,0.17568100736900072,0.03437132004719931,0.0,0.03630866837497625,0.03415010619395795,0.0,0.07164216865797893,0.04275825637645782,0.07685161834795665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034729436745603366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807136278550008,0.0,0.07940943960945758,0.036451094829551486,0.1079755496231567,0.06374175318349741,0.091171292326997,0.0,0.12557707334825746,0.0,0.033601460569141414,0.0,0.0,0.03751510762829848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828456848531735,0.04014691906223601,0.11434512220966912,0.07548107361187291,0.0374203253922091,0.043844531128715634,0.08135518000906325,0.042895058986578014,0.04104430510590875,0.039659986293988536,0.0,0.20264593637309244,0.0,0.0,0.16706143110524566,0.06194679946234185,0.08572668247643066,0.0,0.1651395298895716,0.0,0.1073562996749354,0.11138327038493764,0.07616785408753941,0.20131730928384775,0.033626988897689086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03230449718819786,0.0685892645301857,0.035954577837460026,0.025363925834186063,0.0,0.038174046767718885,0.0413909056440912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04030981883331133,0.0,0.13350821491303902,0.06065920030464385,0.12115741812139988,0.08379859324310382,0.19722498257572046,0.029306360557504043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03722992202405112,0.07292011322781917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025748393452063825,0.08669745678011234,0.04043249650011984,0.044582405715730085,0.08438445061457182,0.0,0.0,0.05268598651875109,0.0,0.07939953793719658,0.0,0.03592034356945616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639686714901052,0.042566398813342114,0.04041549573113426,0.038008231511578616,0.0,0.17039721263324906,0.0390682198407892,0.0,0.04079557659747022,0.0,0.03245004059560127,0.0,0.030217493953705106,0.038042575471486983,0.0,0.0,0.0345919054179206,0.0,0.0,0.03900434832307925,0.09429688754084888,0.04271128642080056,0.038025390391146316,0.03873412353266776,0.06439107729678109,0.0,0.03758094289604517,0.042535592662004525,0.026895143683345852,0.04050075755503951,0.12138084374936345,0.0,0.0,0.03972370624865019,0.04349856036284177,0.0,0.04311962191934527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15270655925026946,0.0664237640295827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10097659485393234,0.09739020501737773,0.03733279169816317,0.060332253754369985,0.06647072842238466,0.043673052337629636,0.036017612409678636,0.03630866837497625,0.042217119161559166,0.0773943388043317,0.0,0.03711847458839231,0.0395572046944524,0.0,0.06563605517102099,0.0,0.03135228716689955,0.02241217465209432,0.0,0.03047966246787205,0.0,0.06832943855154162,0.10567343746528683,0.0,0.0,0.21847882890054304,0.0366286666128744,0.0,0.11065183690659124,0.03858876139660193,0.15489262403360154,0.10797061024503313,0.0,0.09234333357212286,0.12234716584254254
mentalhealth,FromTheSoundInside,2020/04/10,"I hate my body and want to die I'm really tired of living with this body. Sometimes i just wanna end it all because it feels like driving a car that stops working many times a week.   
I have always think of myself as bellow average, i'm not strong enough, tall enough, good looking enough and my d\*ck is small. A little more than a year ago i started training with gymnastic rings to try and at least have some muscle, but my lack of strength combined with poor form got my sternum injured and now i literally can't even do that.   
I'm really tired, i feel disgusted with the low quality of this meat bag that i dare to call body and just wanna kill myself. I really need help.",5.603277777777778,5.660398540740744,5.937916666666666,82.54687500000004,67.2962962962963,9.120370370370368,28.72685185185185,8.841846274778883,2.0143518518518517,533,16,108,8,8,171,90,135,0.254,0.6609999999999999,0.085,-0.98,0,0,0,0,0,2,13.0,0,0,0,3,4,8,3,0,5,0,5,6,3,0,1,24,17,7,2,5,4,0,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,7,9,0,1,3,0,1,2,2,4,0,0,1,4,14,4,16,16,9,15,0,1,1,0,2,5,0,1,9,67,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531545428905924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763067592677533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861774816134448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4710886429406462,0.0,0.0,0.14435397603765865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14671913064765105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12521133866049894,0.4382171800912145,0.0,0.09337316355784954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429612451000998,0.10099433641610864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857395583678465,0.1130660333825767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957302687688686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947569371460558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15640430912310047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906595402001768,0.14168929023271354,0.12483178109584547,0.0,0.1187147015616138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433263952968353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10482362795801127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27169459652950745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13981796360173113,0.0,0.10006199767215283,0.0,0.0,0.11819115881184925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905838111749308,0.0,0.0,0.08243364119282176,0.3249666863873069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598055124070927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338334214791432,0.0,0.11339801530031475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029186158784388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910372665628236
mentalhealth,MasterC1234,2020/04/10,"Do I have a proloblem? And if yes do i need medical help?     Sorry if this not the right subreddit but i do not know really where i should ask this.
    I think i might have some seriuos problems and i want to be sure that those things will not happen again.
   Every time i felt attracted to a girl i would become obsesive and desperate. 
An example it would be the first time when  felt such emotion.  I would try to make her like me with gifts and poems and sometimes even stalk her so i can find her patterns, like when would she leave home and where would she go, all so i  could pretend i just had a random encounter with her. 
 Because of this i let myself in being manipulated by her so i can humilate myself for her amusment. 
 This obessevie behavior appears every time and got good at maninging it but i am worried that i may never heal and i want to knos if need help. 
I know this post is very messy but plese dont judge me its hard for some damn reason to write this. If there question about anything pleae ask
There many things that i have not included because if i did this post it would be to long.",2.5087556561085966,4.508904886877829,3.4027579185520374,90.34775678733034,77.05429864253394,6.591945701357466,23.26719457013575,7.554174236665415,0.9296640723981904,864,27,181,12,20,275,125,221,0.113,0.767,0.12,0.3618,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,1,14,8,1,0,6,1,29,2,0,3,3,56,45,21,0,18,13,0,3,2,0,10,2,0,1,1,17,10,0,0,8,2,0,2,6,2,0,1,5,3,33,6,15,24,3,18,0,0,0,0,15,5,1,12,11,138,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954200807763251,0.0,0.2168022627868223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14136869570069302,0.12806183963346413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09257965783150704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13589696620913713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043239519068334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658637789411389,0.0,0.19539212085594065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22266762495205236,0.0,0.10597965394991707,0.09863022576287238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658992051494352,0.09725652900782047,0.0927388301914138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10253754442994847,0.0,0.10387181095203983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15544274864073726,0.0,0.11631109531480135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274503297203147,0.0,0.0,0.1227783102796322,0.0,0.11857059583423092,0.0,0.11329831940239316,0.0,0.0,0.10261544616631182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07740004833388782,0.1175589329326284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168112340737385,0.0,0.12300863621921565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17195651677905185,0.08943070321487352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22210333670119567,0.0,0.0,0.11095210725609636,0.0,0.0,0.12989477051346818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074282960430795,0.11921979758828913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902389428812017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468125303640787,0.12980076307873198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10928506509408924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15406907774016085,0.0742985000120958,0.0,0.0,0.2028407442252878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0787250049983807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956740119002098,0.13678508703109074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775669179793205,0.0,0.4942214292596577,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fetalfreAK,2020/04/10,Has anyone been to the Mayo Clinic or any other renowned institutions? If so did they genuinely help? I've tried doctors after doctors and even experimental treatment like TMS and Ketamine infusions. Nothing has worked and I'm constantly in pain and misery. I'm desperate at this point so I'm considering these institutions if they have a possibility of helping.,6.173809523809522,9.287319317460325,7.047857142857144,63.23464285714286,70.1111111111111,9.914285714285716,35.89682539682539,10.125756701596842,4.706949206349206,299,16,43,9,6,99,49,63,0.14,0.753,0.107,-0.504,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,1,3,2,0,0,2,0,5,4,0,1,0,8,8,9,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,1,5,6,0,5,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,3,3,27,5,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18181060192142035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869408671985631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889158293110015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5472984447345175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17658548896770207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3584049086791687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061617275170892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25653438097631065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2844846230169601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527369389363858,0.3014026479180762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1815165292298315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19463766050417172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ACatNamedNigel,2020/04/10,"I suffer from disillusion thoughts to do with quantum computers and wanted to find people who suffer the same as me to let me know I am not alone.  

We live in a world of strange mental health conditions, this is mine, I believe in quantum realities. I want to explain it or least try to. I have no scientific background, I am a product of television and books, if you are unwell please don’t read this stuff but i need to connect to other people who suffer the same illness i do because I feel very alone.

*If we can create the universe via a true quantum computer.*

*We can place ourselves back in said universe and repeat the process endlessly.*

*Time would become nothing but a construct, we would control how long a second would last in that reality.*

*We are living in someone's computer, it could be yours, it could be mine, it could be anyone's.*

*We are quantum, we live forever, in this computer simulation. Death and life is nothing more than a cycle repeated on multiple planes of existence. Do not take it for granted, or you will be trapped in a cycle of misery.*

*Why would someone do this? To gain access to cures? To escape a horrible reality? Or because they already know that their world is fine but the next one might not be so great.* 

*Who knows, all I know is the world isn’t real. I am not real. Nothing is real. And the next world will be the same. And the next and the next. How deep are we layered down? Is anyone real? Did computers wipe us out and resimulate the world just to keep themselves busy..anything is possible!*

*Is multiplanes theory real? Do we believe in our multiple versions of ourselves each living slightly different lives, maybe they already made it to the next quantum state, is it a race? Do we search space for aliens or are we looking for ourselves. Are people that interested in black holes looking for space-rips, man-made holes in space from other timelines. Probably.* 

*Some people believe in time travel, I believe one person in the world is real. And the world is reset back to their choice of time, i wonder how many times I've died, have i always lived in the same timeline… probably not. I need to remind myself I am not alone in this thinking, it worries me the true meaning of quantum physics is creating a universe inside a universe.* 

*How many people are like me, that wonder about quantum realities. My wife isn’t amused and doesn't like discussing it...my kids are too young to understand nor would i explain it to them.*

Come and say hello! We can talk about books, travel, movies. Anything really.... I just want to know I'm not alone feeling this way.",2.3453451839603154,5.1266052032520335,3.467487942676037,85.05507854485327,83.34959349593495,5.937219236599146,25.818657847595425,7.336307375243711,1.6123673969960042,2048,86,366,32,59,659,217,492,0.08199999999999999,0.8170000000000001,0.1,0.6473,1,5,0,0,0,0,89.0,14,3,5,2,12,11,0,0,27,0,58,3,0,6,3,96,86,27,2,15,18,1,2,2,0,8,3,2,0,2,25,27,0,2,16,6,0,3,13,3,0,3,4,7,48,8,52,64,10,49,0,3,3,0,35,28,0,10,18,261,73,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525633459207205,0.1345516843333207,0.0,0.05072734809478217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525559234593738,0.0,0.10033717862964904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937558753828531,0.0,0.07432678718021109,0.06733050095118158,0.0,0.2747444608065937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052515518926418266,0.0,0.0,0.06837687111216152,0.14602557852188175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06327152635899376,0.06369492728261357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061650966358219414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055720448898003726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067213576911519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480241309367417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05418804910263185,0.0,0.0,0.1675224752944213,0.04969420464720434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062340332127422335,0.043061029565022425,0.05956835091643259,0.0,0.3229966246329736,0.05395166441058477,0.1023896520637676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576860843357937,0.0,0.12361686929213628,0.061247034834792276,0.06640821328827484,0.0,0.0,0.061437877396866736,0.06467370078133096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09040880913230588,0.0,0.0,0.3241821889980619,0.0,0.0,0.17549124705837868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262224648564426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2113255421447795,0.05323185023644469,0.06369492728261357,0.06692071414026353,0.0,0.0687283141133495,0.0,0.0,0.13146008524189645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06098099825683245,0.41634568967834207,0.03905542003970456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05799120060786519,0.04848141765173651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033100466985522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06978976732587795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045837717173015664,0.04900095612504751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03906359021589872,0.0,0.048399003514609996,0.14219556178055798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04139089395479944,0.0,0.0,0.06346619494208025,0.07333278761689634,0.0,0.0,0.05030209754668492,0.10787532561004624,0.048390782751391005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055010979187038365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13222680021860167,0.0,0.06191240944064037,0.0,0.21653715962605816,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,smoltcup,2020/04/10,"Barely a person I don't feel like I have anywhere else to talk about this, so here goes nothing I guess. I (20/f) have been having a hard time trying to convince myself that life can be meaningful. 

I have the opportunity to decide what type of career I want to do and all the resources to pursue that career, but nothing feels fulfilling anymore. I use to be a very good student, but now I have to read a sentence multiple times to absorb it properly. I used to love playing my guitar and writing music, but now everything sounds hollow. 

I used to be very motivated and goal oriented, but I seem to have fallen into this kind of rut. The best way I could describe it is it's like watching cartoons late at night. I'm aware it's there and it's happening. I can see the colours and I can hear the words, but I'm not really paying attention and I don't know what's going on.

At this point if someone were to ask me where I see myself in 5 years I wouldn't have an answer,  because I can't see myself in 5 years. I can't see my life going anywhere and me being happy about it.

I know this is kind of silly, but I just want to feel like myself again. I want to be excited about what my future holds or at the very least just be convinced I do have a future.",4.393261494252878,4.4404896743295055,5.781836685823755,82.66401939655175,69.88122605363984,8.364080459770115,27.42361111111111,8.07648339933343,1.6148254789272034,979,29,205,12,16,332,132,261,0.049,0.775,0.175,0.9863,0,2,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,4,12,15,0,0,12,0,29,3,0,4,1,43,54,16,0,6,11,0,4,3,0,1,2,2,0,1,15,8,0,1,11,3,1,3,6,0,0,0,2,12,32,15,27,44,3,24,0,0,6,1,6,9,0,4,14,143,47,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11951686857533587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266372194736987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346382468409046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647133450235434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096220110379268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067344696295916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1083096357365368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828055250052903,0.17218953456633693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698103756064536,0.1010808872643317,0.0,0.0,0.13275905101593835,0.0,0.10656956478522484,0.1282887108977167,0.10795629784341616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582731350174215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509922352474046,0.1324619801023859,0.0,0.13594431740839974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17024429800853713,0.1766302185711973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876801106427804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11309362301035344,0.0,0.23127163519536775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522761609211873,0.0,0.0,0.11392407699825495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054597097379993,0.0,0.07720394327831945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3841341747434456,0.1097108352743744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211057744721536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686407247484838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405446167903769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08182065961335502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3122545440875212,0.0,0.2983084254497854,0.2132457034404296,0.09565789442115373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521330318027482
mentalhealth,xxggukkth,2020/04/10,"17F, I don't know what to do. I think I have BDD I am so sorry, this may be a long post but I have no one else to turn to about this, and I think I need serious help. 

I am a 17 year old female high school student, and like every teenager experiences at some point in their lives, I have terribly low self-esteem and confidence. But I think it's getting to the point of compromising my mental health, because I seriously cannot stop looking in the mirror and crying for hours, sometimes days, about how I look. I have even thought about suicide over this. 

The reason I think it might be Body Dysmorphia is because I have heard that you seemingly see yourself different than as you actually look. People always tell me I am pretty, and have a good body. I even did one of those dumb ""Rate Me"" things on Reddit as a last resort and got mostly 8s, some 9s. But I still can't help but think I am disgusting, fat, and ugly. I don't think there's any point of living if my looks are going to get in the way of me being happy, having a husband, and starting a family. I don't think I will ever find love because of how I look. 

I honestly don't know what's happening to me anymore. I am very intelligent, I get good grades in school, so I have a lot of potential. But slowly, I am losing all my motivation and dedication. Over something that's so superficial. I am no longer happy in life anymore. I just want to go back to when I was younger and didn't care about these things. 

Of course, I am not a professional, which is why I am here. What do you think this might be? Just regular teenager stuff, or something more? What can I do to gain confidence and help myself? 

If you read all of this, thank you so much. I really appreciate it <3",3.633778409090908,4.59827923011364,5.05347272727273,83.90970909090909,72.03977272727273,8.359272727272728,25.72772727272727,8.726425361277474,1.652329409090909,1347,41,286,24,25,452,179,352,0.125,0.672,0.203,0.9878,1,0,2,0,0,2,48.0,0,5,1,3,20,16,2,0,12,0,41,6,3,4,3,52,74,28,1,4,11,1,0,1,0,4,3,1,0,0,20,11,1,1,15,1,0,2,10,7,0,2,6,7,49,9,34,60,8,30,0,2,6,1,13,14,1,11,13,204,69,7,0.0,0.0,0.08119059427228306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922855001622634,0.0,0.0,0.05657843215801304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650228593677146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397518845386432,0.0,0.15215271142017156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18483151282858706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482731395204411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913906133667758,0.05365671787904669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08692564513574243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06950240697512683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990481305338654,0.07525860343502568,0.07009906691391952,0.0,0.0,0.08138495939898345,0.07843297192036991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604272701688525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13040472804853953,0.0,0.0945682511885979,0.13956738695233795,0.06654214545221651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357293791271542,0.17713457647691555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843705150218632,0.0,0.0,0.16730037409672738,0.08790471406666521,0.0,0.0,0.0819346311178805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144840797191044,0.06781860004799736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058766183349903675,0.040647015029222015,0.0,0.14693315554163647,0.07362883411780417,0.3493326290089295,0.0930788258432585,0.0,0.07073313855027766,0.07509068973913223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384540741835589,0.17652279085865952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06116111813216645,0.06169128685013092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730375479383443,0.0,0.11275610766399882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0576799750570081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23595092259168424,0.0,0.07968200863483567,0.08464368126869827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322189600715149,0.0,0.053299653957300484,0.08554282058043723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684044308977671,0.06629913485503418,0.07574159177867629,0.08679509956996607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281018966080406,0.08228631528390389,0.09313489547761576,0.05888895014836334,0.0,0.0664431331979531,0.06955840799873705,0.0,0.0,0.09524338605110927,0.09100661908792852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271992621900215,0.07659881190268089,0.0,0.0,0.11054794372016807,0.4264864315827117,0.0,0.06605101511094635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09049703530376857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06864820272932752,0.04907315057851377,0.06603979608335961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507450058252105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05357767361218064
mentalhealth,seekinghelpdesperate,2020/04/10,Effexor/prozac combo?? Please share experience.,10.684999999999997,12.555800833333347,9.180000000000003,34.59000000000003,124.0,14.533333333333335,36.333333333333336,8.841846274778883,8.764933333333335,39,2,3,2,2,12,6,6,0.0,0.382,0.618,0.594,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6652975081425923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7465783452922121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MentalNotCrazy,2020/04/10,"I binged drank and cut myself up Last night, I drank way too much. Ended up slicing up my face and body with a razor. This isn't the first time either. I've come to the conclusion that I am an alcoholic, on top of my other mental health issues. I don't want to do these things anymore. I just wanted to say that.",1.34,3.0688969393939445,3.003030303030304,93.12454545454548,79.60606060606061,5.612121212121212,17.060606060606062,6.42735559955562,-0.3388303030303028,242,4,54,2,6,80,50,66,0.055999999999999994,0.9129999999999999,0.03,-0.1336,0,0,1,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,3,2,1,1,0,4,0,4,6,2,0,0,9,9,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,6,4,3,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,2,1,8,0,9,7,2,12,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,5,38,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819666227256684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2616601487228661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2930687379960783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22727633076982506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23368550412276898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22442368273890967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804514736605162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753822694042265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21506626467056986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658904573448264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193954065852896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475976367958792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098175727796738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528475452222927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384826330346688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112414347411473,0.2094253236310159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mangledmatters,2020/04/10,"In the final days before my divorce becomes finalized, my new girlfriend just died. On December 1st, 2019, my wife of four years rolled over in bed and told me she needed to talk. Over the next three hours, I learned that my wife was no longer in love with me and didn't find my physically attractive anymore. Three days later, I was leaving our apartment for work for the last time. I've been living with my boss and his family for the last 4 months while I work on getting myself right.  


Part of making myself right was a lot of self-reflection and meditation. I realized pretty quickly that I didn't want to be single. I married my wife with every intention to spend the rest of my life with her. Another man and her change of opinion in me obviously affected her long-term plans as a couple. I rifled through the emotional baggage and came to the realization that I wouldn't go looking for a new mate, but if one were to walk into my life, I wouldn't go out of my way to avoid it or resist it.   


Along came Robin (name changed). About a month after I moved out of my apartment and divorce paperwork had been filed, I reconnected with someone I'd had a huge crush on almost a decade earlier. I'd known her since middle school. We had been friends in the past and even touched on the idea of a relationship long before I met me soon-to-be ex-wife. We started talking again and it was as if no time at all had passed- we were laughing and joking within minutes of meeting up for the first time in 8 years.  


As the weeks went by, my feelings for Robin grew and she was having the same feelings for me (which was quite a shock to someone who was still coping with the fact that his wife had told him he's no longer physically attractive to her- my self-confidence wasn't willing to accept that Robin could possibly like me). In late February 2020, Robin and I began discussing a relationship again. She had been hurt in the past and so had I. I wanted to be respectful of my ex, my marriage and of course Robin so I made the decision I didn't want to start a ""real"" boyfriend/girlfriend relationship until after the divorce was finalized (May 12th is the date).   


We continued to grow closer and then the lock-down started. We texted every waking hour, it seemed. We FaceTimed regularly, sent videos and even had a few quick visits early on before stay-at-home orders went into effect. I had fallen in love with this woman and I knew it. She told me she loved me. 

On Wednesday, April 8th, Robin died suddenly in her sleep. I was the last person she had talked to. She was 32 years old with a 10-year-old daughter. She was a wonderful human being and she liked me for me, as cheesy as that may sound. That meant the world to me.  

I'm at a complete loss right now. Considering how the last two relationships of mine have ended, I've made the decision to step away for a while. I won't go out of my way to turn away from a potential match down the line, but I don't think I can handle any more heartache.",4.901366800709127,5.633908880269817,5.363608768971332,83.69015912137331,68.96627318718382,8.51038180481688,28.189951139360925,8.617729084823388,1.884767924936222,2358,77,479,36,39,755,286,593,0.068,0.843,0.08900000000000001,0.9548,0,2,0,1,3,0,72.0,7,0,0,7,13,16,0,1,39,0,46,7,2,8,3,88,83,35,2,9,6,6,3,2,3,6,2,1,1,4,15,40,0,1,16,2,1,16,11,4,0,6,45,5,78,12,89,28,8,111,0,2,1,3,63,39,0,10,55,322,93,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703273205767972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04776024820006287,0.07364449875448699,0.0,0.0,0.0696513885368409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13197077241141836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756585582103914,0.1792870772256272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16065366453272387,0.0,0.0,0.14859253554461924,0.0,0.0736370388814112,0.0,0.0,0.056074630911699966,0.07771050207686296,0.0,0.09058781114142553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457796992984548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07900167910058371,0.062204810027535286,0.0,0.0,0.092775302347572,0.0,0.11834717600697785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620858979484635,0.0,0.07102293760203282,0.0,0.0,0.2308075551084247,0.06419088294976201,0.05973940319002236,0.0,0.0,0.05426115969191239,0.0,0.03669338262246793,0.0,0.1197435924699882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383289769303496,0.0,0.07518493426156297,0.07928351187207626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289941977767876,0.07922488753308993,0.07436567161894947,0.0,0.0,0.0992140430729238,0.06862373000954171,0.0,0.06201624638420741,0.1243064276622783,0.058977290212818376,0.0,0.0,0.059708834696866865,0.19016168401974415,0.13291065526795126,0.046880483731853176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211721212479786,0.07464562605391445,0.0,0.05207622515086323,0.0,0.13566123327532018,0.07469265363049779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14739358581396905,0.0,0.0475911003778398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605453908409443,0.1340890059932892,0.0,0.0613239759425072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917615980912443,0.0,0.07145131230695477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747005019067082,0.0,0.0799395253787396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016120418443332,0.0,0.17993353357661065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107865233173116,0.0,0.0639366819553181,0.14653483102654888,0.0,0.0,0.058096733279420776,0.0,0.07028283820428173,0.0,0.119014890337662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491319625544959,0.07485809247745298,0.056087459685371405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16934974688414822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0450019049870946,0.0,0.0,0.12285873735878765,0.0,0.0,0.20132939374678024,0.0,0.0,0.07639237608081552,0.06860657358282221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12427416749777885,0.11149397152660732,0.05633596824950286,0.0,0.0,0.1302117529272813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616373542853774,0.1022596358685021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18090872384397091
mentalhealth,raindrop_army,2020/04/10,"Idk what to do For the last few days my parents have been completing ignoring me, and keep bringing up things that happened 6 months ago. The cause of this? I went for a run in the rain and they told me not to. They spend an entire evening screaming at me, telling me how I’m spoiled and how I’m such a disappointment to our family. 
I don’t know what to do because I’ve started cutting again, and my suicidal thoughts have come back. The last time I told my school counselor about what happened, it ended with my mom picking me up early from school and yelling at me the entire way home about how I’m cutting myself for attention, and how I don’t hVe anything to be sad about. Watching my parents with my brother makes me realize how much better they would be without me and all I can do is sit in my bathroom and cry all day. I can’t reach out to anyone, and I feel like this is the only place where I can talk abt it.",8.367789473684214,5.327796173684213,7.956710526315793,80.31822368421055,63.57894736842106,10.973684210526317,38.48684210526316,8.472884824447931,3.0009999999999994,723,28,158,7,8,230,109,190,0.125,0.841,0.034,-0.9451,2,0,0,0,1,1,14.0,1,0,3,1,13,8,2,0,9,0,16,0,0,8,2,33,32,14,1,1,2,4,1,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,9,13,0,2,5,0,1,4,5,6,0,0,5,4,28,2,24,24,4,27,0,2,1,0,12,9,0,0,13,110,37,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177697277351594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394562329441354,0.0,0.1223334479917994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430936828918092,0.0,0.09062096700435893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13147654429420755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15271344035860546,0.0,0.1280563115504819,0.15586582424917875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16329460739378082,0.1917451334949258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316674887323981,0.0,0.0,0.09818767287518854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14014219715391854,0.0,0.07516630813853477,0.106201808832662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629168044435398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14911680239420627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213468780384965,0.0,0.0,0.08169893672027906,0.2423533722087825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262713441136501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923084020031248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17410727905547155,0.1186579603539915,0.0,0.10928125335011213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130616442654608,0.0,0.0,0.3301357995235775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553167067379859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30090109272448723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052213968158443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16260849541033046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194862362992658,0.12993426090686055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098762238281121,0.0,0.0,0.11801840673961092,0.0866840865934334,0.0,0.0,0.28409952725435633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799836084389333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780810924259268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330168709584146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056028790810699,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GeniusArtist,2020/04/10,"My mom makes stuff up and plays the victim role in an extreme disturbing way. I want to help her get psychiatric support... Yet I don't know what she can be diagnosed with. Her behaviors and thinking patterns are detaching her from the real world and making her separated from others and real life. She brings pain and hard feelings to herself after generating them out of no where.

She doesn't listen, if you told her a story of something that happened with you earlier today; she would cut you off and make assumptions on your own story out of no where!

She's disturbing my sister's mirage because she's connecting certain life events (in her own way) that generates unreal assumptions on my sister's husband which makes her hate him and disturb their mirage in the excuse of the bad judgements she generated on them from her own wrong analyzations.

Raised by such mother, we (her sons and daughters) grew up hating and isolating ourselves from our grandmother (father's mother) that died a couple of weeks ago because we were brainwashed from our mother by the bad things she used to say about our grandma ... It was unbearable... If we were having a normal family conversation about anything in the world, mom would interrupt and redirect the conversation to something bad about grandma (playing the victim role as if the world had lives on hurting her)... causing extremely bad vibes it made us not able to talk to my mom due to the unbelievable conversations switches.

It's crazy how she's living in the world where she lives on assumptions. Not letting anything go.

She would ""create"" problems with my dad over silly things and intentioned social stupidity, knowing what hits his nerves and doing it in no time to crack his anger out and then blaming him for that.

She's living the victim role in an unbelievable way where she plays the victim in every single life situation.... She's the victim in the stories she tells and listens to. Always playing victim role in every subject, every life event, and all conversations involves her. And it sticks to her mind to the point she redirects everything towards her victimized-situations that keep her locked in her disturbed world.

​

I hope I was clear and sorry for the upcoming language but what the fuck is wrong with her? I love her so much but can't stand the problems she's making and the bad vibes she keeps spreading.",8.233558139534885,8.774245937209308,7.5831162790697695,71.33048837209303,61.72093023255814,10.321860465116279,35.10697674418604,10.078955797065145,3.630933023255814,1923,77,310,37,25,600,212,430,0.17,0.779,0.051,-0.9921,0,0,2,0,0,0,53.0,7,4,3,0,11,36,12,4,25,0,18,8,0,10,3,65,46,27,1,11,7,13,2,0,0,3,6,3,0,0,18,28,0,2,4,4,0,3,8,27,0,0,7,5,64,9,58,33,6,51,0,1,0,2,86,34,1,4,10,226,82,0,0.08219901666898123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286446867218767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839616669452628,0.08906260021845472,0.09988080238353536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352855738168941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3431637273168965,0.10021551523544366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08444103288027532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909516484939435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343027164330813,0.08530960175132793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077686502744063,0.0,0.07387517595888862,0.0,0.0774899173903735,0.0,0.041562292631941625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599166637316476,0.04294559357024295,0.0,0.04671559545006451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268831897395872,0.0,0.0736341734031167,0.16230902249127024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05509626819231054,0.0,0.0,0.08164217064176374,0.0,0.0,0.08799574742464424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14612452566413614,0.0,0.0,0.09034885974254554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405406369780033,0.23223838554810186,0.0,0.0,0.2903329506980286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418782180763348,0.07777869706126593,0.27434240956185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829975745300262,0.2888114845863316,0.0,0.0,0.060425735191778275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805375838318503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08746554919738353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07770463982237345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730671546506167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871209532484673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536795728212329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239513873972628,0.0,0.08379154592776733,0.0,0.12656163782478305,0.0,0.09201506942830986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409820814354657,0.0,0.09327847001354203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660684559551153,0.07184556363700717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921874840148328,0.05266981083066112,0.0,0.0,0.04793090764666463,0.0,0.07791505652345017,0.07854468298868351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887529615480624,0.07099355851877832,0.0,0.0,0.04848310973445079,0.19573726014763945,0.06593509300360431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17517546910992388,0.17974344181943108,0.09988080238353536,0.0
mentalhealth,UniverseKeeper,2020/04/10,"Anyone else feel like you aren't allowed to have an episode? A bit of context, my family knows and accepts that I'm autistic, anxious, angry, etc. But everytime, without fault, I have an episode (panic, anger, frustration, autistic meltdown) I ALWAYS get chastised for them and get told “you can control it”. No, I seriously CAN'T CONTROL IT so why does my family keep telling me this? This meantl stuff is so second nature it's virtually a first reaction basis thing and it's not a conscious thinking process either, I don't know what they think whether I feel validated or try to get away with being an ass on purpose but I always get shut down, no help is offered just criticism that seriously just makes me feel worse about myself in those low moments. Anyone know this pain and confusion?",5.009566210045659,7.1795975136986305,5.319383561643836,78.59542237442923,70.43835616438356,7.880365296803652,32.714611872146115,8.59863814320734,2.8857050228310506,631,30,107,11,12,200,102,146,0.245,0.693,0.062,-0.9808,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,2,2,3,5,11,2,2,6,0,9,2,1,4,0,30,25,10,0,0,9,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,13,5,0,3,10,0,0,0,7,9,0,2,1,3,15,2,11,23,3,8,0,1,0,1,8,6,1,2,3,73,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514912253862406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17072484831146278,0.0,0.21133603662907635,0.15484235092668994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419840965250113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164986087106803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3389923532360513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322478832877818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12624304202074804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685409807306825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849287499783699,0.0,0.2292354763948715,0.10796158919535703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1285442986184238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31582003711281703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10129389314885416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343241799733704,0.0,0.0,0.2491581021314838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07383057723725242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087511053692597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16080446616967273,0.17730910955885432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17299853790317707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208729166310193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039874381161318,0.19366575506817876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144403550133305,0.0,0.10260192018193798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13636410225501522,0.0,0.0,0.1456762181670559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15400623185158313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spiral_Thoughts,2020/04/10,"Spiral When a spiral begins it is difficult to pull back into reality.

The world slows, freezing.

The outside voices become quiet as you sink deeper.

Vision becomes blurry and messy…distant.

Although, you wonder if it is really happening, whether you really are spiralling or drifting, or whether its a made up concept by yourself to make yourself able to relate to the situation.

To understand it.

However, when you try to explain this spiral to others they brush it off.

Maybe you’re just being weird.

But during the spiral,

Nothing makes sense, you cannot grip on reality. 

You hear the outside voices but they are faint.

Lights dim and blur.

But you’re probably just imagining it because you don’t really exist.

The spiral continues as if endlessly.

Until you are pulled up and out.

Saved from the infinite loop of reality.

Its a coping mechanism they say.

A way of living through life.

But you cannot live through others bodies.

So why judge the grip of the spiral and compare to your own?

Because you don't exist",3.6733024453024465,6.680201313513518,4.812200772200775,76.25225225225228,79.10810810810811,7.199485199485201,27.187902187902193,8.269060116576782,2.550276705276706,813,34,125,17,21,266,110,185,0.031,0.94,0.028999999999999998,0.4019,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,11,3,0,6,3,0,0,13,0,10,3,1,3,0,27,19,21,0,2,12,0,3,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,10,6,0,0,4,0,0,3,4,2,0,1,1,10,14,1,24,17,1,19,0,0,0,0,17,7,0,6,8,94,24,0,0.18141356783246695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949583567191362,0.0,0.22117605426162476,0.4007140654616041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20150957710051404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604234189067422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20446627568369694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813776799665752,0.0,0.0,0.32038300809340997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716579042796443,0.242189930455225,0.0,0.18225431252852875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17407121108623316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19559450939405532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486545307401128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14426735054782322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203916451174224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231679042589,0.0,0.0,0.18885792200669327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439976460388928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636975278933744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19673527572961486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bigplatts,2020/04/10,"Anyone felt better after coming off antidepressants? I've been on antidepressants a long time now. Sertraline (think you americans call it Zoloft) for nearly 3 years now. I've tried others too. In some ways I'm still depressed and don't think the pills have/are going to help with that. In other ways I'm a lot better than I was, but I don't think that's got anything to do with the meds (more to do with meditation, healthier lifestyle, changes in my life, therapy, etc.) and now I want to come off because 1) they seem pointless and 2) it takes me AGES to orgasm, among other side effects, so would be good to see the back of that.

But the prospect of coming off them (I'm gonna talk to my doctor, and slowly edge off them by bringing down the dose in installments) worries me. I'm worried I've just not noticed how much they've helped. Or that no matter how carefully I ween off them my body will still basically be addicted to them and coming off will push me into a depression.

The internet is filled with horror stories of people who came off antidepressants then realised it was a massive mistake (I mean one of my favourite authours Davod Foster Wallace killed himself after his doctor recommend tapering off his meds) or who had bad withdrawal systems or 'brain zaps'. I'm interested to know if anyone came off them and was totally fine, or if anyone actually feels like their mental health improved from coming off them? I believe antidepressants are just bullshit, there's no real evidence that they work, altho there does seem to be evidence that long-term use of them can prolong a depression that might have otherwise ended by itself. So thoughts on this? Or just general thoughts on taking meds for depression?",7.178637770897832,7.561908721362228,7.041238390092879,74.8592569659443,63.95356037151703,10.143653250773994,33.71826625386997,9.93914555978268,3.293158513931889,1379,54,243,27,19,438,183,323,0.152,0.75,0.098,-0.9827,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,10,4,17,14,1,0,11,0,20,11,3,4,1,56,53,21,1,5,13,0,2,1,0,5,8,0,0,0,17,18,0,0,12,0,0,11,5,7,0,1,11,3,27,7,48,34,6,50,0,4,1,1,20,22,0,12,15,165,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.08929877504441623,0.09975741390637824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19195392327797647,0.0,0.07530342803575654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07036413532098068,0.07640550079483165,0.055782531918832715,0.0,0.0,0.10309837298165032,0.0,0.16186308248766934,0.0,0.10164494935119413,0.0,0.10215338281786823,0.09344007419537803,0.20932193998386428,0.0932986794113368,0.0,0.0968035117586298,0.3941309347388195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315263415649958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18732498186024055,0.08007941742831325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104907876931237,0.0,0.10205580016989624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046269280957429486,0.06537345591071411,0.08786219491248826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05200620259603984,0.07675271256912403,0.07318744407489622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726890705098808,0.0,0.0,0.1226719967192922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10124023355703604,0.0,0.050290497839362576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06463492765655797,0.04470627027496242,0.0,0.0,0.1619637041359359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779697493534746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967922516129188,0.3049348480535824,0.0,0.09221871378905784,0.09707570890684594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726903502187802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418265961648472,0.0,0.0,0.06200830517020103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06344024407445031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415633270698738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292016497876819,0.16661120481683667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461570877235397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13760551307515353,0.07355080187904392,0.0,0.0,0.10464756897747053,0.0,0.0,0.17590422382707782,0.0,0.14529453301122824,0.053359150614895434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06212804160590282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07903367926216376,0.0,0.0,0.05397389036881894,0.14526985415699234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661903861420586,0.1858619798765559,0.0,0.06500477944333856,0.0,0.0,0.05892826214884087
mentalhealth,zoomraidwarrior69420,2020/04/10,"Should I ask my GP about this? I've been doing research on Schizophrenia as part of my Psychology class and I read that one of the ways it can manifest itself is a feeling that everyone can hear your thoughts and feelings of persecution. Reading that made me remember of a few years ago in middle school when I always thought that everyone knew exactly what I was thinking and that they were all in this group to humiliate me for my embarrassing thoughts. All this stopped around when I was 13, I'm 16 now and it's been pretty rare for me to get these feelings since then but I still am wondering if this is something I should bring up to my GP at my next appointment?",7.198593238822247,6.676212610687022,7.021548527808073,78.05374045801528,64.1145038167939,10.844492911668484,36.27153762268266,10.290406445055957,3.4850972737186483,536,23,107,11,7,170,87,131,0.048,0.924,0.027000000000000003,-0.3864,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,1,0,6,1,0,1,3,0,13,0,0,1,3,24,28,10,0,3,2,0,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,14,5,0,1,10,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,10,4,17,0,17,16,4,18,0,0,0,0,5,7,0,2,9,80,31,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553452625801718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458189522034345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15600635272338542,0.16383162490475506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3349106807612176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26582936978750066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155895364920427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975153056618638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16582227714422204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18637641784225487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11875142170569915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18977465475064575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17828847939686865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505874288368497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19851988466852588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735860171975526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449655422676566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491315601929327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995191379521668,0.1465137456863888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11229074667856727,0.0,0.4173779378534107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910234818361578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900471263061416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128528652672141
mentalhealth,Squidkid64,2020/04/10,"My aggressive feeling towards a cute pitbull My best friend was sharing cute animal pictures with me on Instagram and I didn't seem to mind because they were pretty cute! But there was one particular picture she shared, a picture that made me super violent towards it but it was so cute at the same time. It made me feel angry and aggressive to the point where I wanted to hug so much that it's eyes would pop out! I've never felt this way towards an animal before, I really love animals! Cats, Dogs, ect. Im not sure if there's something wrong with me. I scared my-self to the point where I cried. If your wondering what the picture looked like it was a puppy sleeping on its back showing its cute lil belly towards camera. If there is something wrong with me please let me know.",4.0312745098039215,5.7054722091503285,4.730212418300656,83.85845588235297,72.00653594771242,7.714379084967319,27.782679738562088,8.344100000000001,1.9492836601307189,620,23,118,10,12,199,96,153,0.15,0.607,0.243,0.9379,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,2,8,20,3,1,8,0,9,4,2,2,2,26,20,9,0,5,6,0,3,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,11,6,0,0,6,1,0,0,3,6,0,1,9,5,16,14,15,9,3,16,0,0,2,2,7,12,0,5,4,80,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12442848035732848,0.0,0.09864308920278772,0.0,0.13769567183361509,0.0,0.1698185900959916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777500842901414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636406470568134,0.0,0.15537118937011246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12502061421046426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17479180763944854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893124592550145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16547043606410514,0.0,0.0790563722183469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13588683118349126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14604756373577332,0.3062332587630124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16339061129897411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895525703106916,0.0,0.124804445439183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096524407877006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17762818022651747,0.3059416777715853,0.0,0.0,0.16462764528953913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366510995526064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16200860306352433,0.0,0.0,0.14731353502244424,0.1688120442152687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16193541845851214,0.0,0.0,0.2491516588079281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15251207307497086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943577007502792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544477633284708,0.12844403695170262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17548532021622726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11495125869451513,0.3538463744531929,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_inmyfeelings,2020/04/10,"My job is the reason for my anxiety I just wanted to vent, might delete this later. I work in a call center for a large department/hospital. I didn’t have anxiety before I started this job almost two years ago but I’m definitely overworked and underpaid. I don’t have full on anxiety attacks but my chest tightens up pretty often when I’m at work or think about going into work. I can’t get another job right now because of COVID but even before COVID when I was applying, I didn’t get a single interview. My degree isn’t good enough and I’m constantly battling this feeling that I’m not good enough and never will be. I’m exhausted all the time from work and I just HATE my job.",4.76949275362319,5.405526239130435,6.1233333333333375,78.47166666666669,69.21739130434783,9.611594202898553,29.10144927536232,9.725611199111238,2.6690231884057978,543,19,105,12,9,184,84,138,0.146,0.73,0.124,-0.2874,4,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,4,8,6,3,0,5,0,12,2,1,1,2,21,25,10,0,1,7,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,1,1,7,4,0,1,3,1,14,2,11,19,5,19,0,0,0,0,2,8,0,4,10,69,18,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175771294529823,0.0,0.13281954319081996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13908433597163114,0.3044071218286049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15089685655231672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085595642676155,0.0,0.2257333044192172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13544000796966602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433364414260377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741046234316632,0.0,0.08760729952550039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706663961462209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385975827906086,0.0,0.07538222282820188,0.22250384733897927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095428606430906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5264979144951057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407098068063665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10229994705003152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494230383242245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13637574727880553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327361608711843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388309303403994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08499019177867835,0.0,0.0,0.0773433010062135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12956975594153666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07823435720332844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862532515534258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541564595067888
mentalhealth,bcc101,2020/04/10,"Is this a diagnosis? I think I might have been diagnosed with Bipolar 2 but i'm not sure and could use a little help.

I started antidepressants and after a couple of days they triggered a hypomanic episode that lasted just over a week. We stopped the antidepressant immediately and started seroquel. When I next saw my psychiatrist they kind of told me all about bipolar and said that I might be bipolar 2 and that we are going to continue the seroquel as if I had BP2 and not go back on the antidepressants.

Could this be a diagnosis? I don't really know, and I kind of feel like I have a bit of imposter syndrome because I am only ""maybe bipolar"" despite being treated for it.",6.295846153846156,6.847666392307692,7.267500000000003,71.90125,65.84615384615384,9.884615384615383,36.25,9.827888789773867,3.6082307692307696,541,26,98,11,8,182,84,130,0.040999999999999995,0.9009999999999999,0.057999999999999996,0.4456,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,2,0,2,0,4,5,0,0,10,0,15,5,0,2,2,27,27,11,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,2,5,1,0,0,6,10,0,1,3,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,5,3,16,5,12,15,2,16,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,3,12,74,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13750922208387706,0.0,0.10901310070871514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19523603009135107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855623874222386,0.19787198007414464,0.0,0.11533054788017735,0.0,0.0,0.18150867325163925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09042181505980028,0.12775617899956654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032664063843221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11986597123233635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724478263388908,0.09828028447383848,0.14577030815849673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736729897608239,0.1792346280756874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17965875910570828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3794207135248069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19018772078245552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360082640920258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1145630693732723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17010827003074444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531535715624305,0.0,0.0,0.14950987725807174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16854514711352803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458703532885985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17087971691136228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15445169196197436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14344662933585914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xlFireman,2020/04/10,"Feeling apathetic and easily irritated lately I’ve been feeling increasingly irritated and agitated lately. Any small thing seems to set me off on an anger path. Before I used to have mediums to outlet (gym, nice long drives in the car) but with the quarantine that’s kind of not happening. 

What are some healthy ways to stay positive and cope and prevent myself from going crazy?",6.703529411764709,8.655927000000002,7.240470588235301,67.37511764705886,65.76470588235293,10.734117647058824,32.71764705882353,10.793553405168565,4.083184705882354,308,13,49,9,5,101,57,68,0.162,0.644,0.19399999999999998,0.3919,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,13,9,5,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,1,3,1,0,4,1,1,0,0,1,2,3,2,10,8,2,14,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,2,3,29,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18139842240493093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22698369593953785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26975255198853104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15159956648582515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23588520148083236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27777796644275554,0.0,0.0,0.6018088328817217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23606441258716354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428382112236437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28431887168531345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17721613896036092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303854331951577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21173288775497015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scarberia123,2020/04/10,"29M, PTSD and Depression have been dealt with (for the most part), but I've never been in a relationship and have zero desire to form one (platonic or romantic), anyone else experience the same and have you figured out a solution? I've found a routine (meds, cardio, meditation, CBT journals) that helps keep my PTSD and Depression symptoms in check, so I've managed my negative and angry thoughts for the most part.

But relationship wise I've struggled all my life, most of my family and friends know me as the loner and I don't even care anymore. I can get along really well with people I see on a regular basis, but if for any reason I don't see them I feel no desire to make plans to catch up. 

Same with romantic relationships, I'm on dating apps, but when I get matches, messaging them feels like a chore, I know I should date someone because peer pressure so I go through the motions of going on dates, it rarely works out probably mostly because of me. I'm never disrespectful or rude or sleazy, every girl I've gone on dates with say I'm the nicest guy, but my lack of desire must show somehow.

I'm definitely not gay and my sex drive is normal is not above average, just no desire for any kind of relationships.

If anyone has any advice I'd really appreciate it.",4.970004743833017,6.02236675,6.181669829222013,76.7263282732448,69.0,9.544971537001896,29.507590132827325,9.773937934552695,2.7885077798861486,1006,37,190,23,17,338,144,248,0.132,0.6809999999999999,0.188,0.9521,0,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,2,2,7,11,1,2,11,0,13,5,0,2,4,56,33,22,0,10,13,0,2,1,1,2,3,1,1,2,3,15,0,1,8,1,1,6,9,5,1,2,5,5,20,6,28,26,11,22,0,2,2,2,13,9,0,10,8,120,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230887328522524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344702915115984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398029386287258,0.1607243258066347,0.11776000371714432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012128037817695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717942846097272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19797915197515245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600978678414268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0759105916402505,0.0,0.09683400562776673,0.0,0.0,0.11242420139677832,0.1083463614953117,0.0,0.11622475113475075,0.08210645904603504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12601549442319468,0.08879511316207482,0.0,0.12009301241480776,0.0,0.13063544168212546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379938476551625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770355730350579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021556172345607,0.0,0.11968255641154806,0.12632572788845334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117889694901162,0.056149296351190536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671708237896672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276620113603684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772831612752496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11260760710126452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787996363424224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24891732660362514,0.0,0.07967842191306944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12391464882006285,0.0,0.26869549264202297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14725499834675812,0.11816782068829874,0.0,0.4935699041206416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139744328568428,0.0,0.0,0.18316965061894788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09738034273049063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015043982537205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11945692200712035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09124207568735894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033364314447299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367086135287306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,subbabyg,2020/04/10,"Can someone help me? I've suffered with a number of different mental health problems for about 10 years now. November last year I went through a horrible break up which resulted in my depression completely taking over. Because of this is lost my job, which also resulted in me losing the flat. I moved in with my father who I've never lived with and his understanding of mental health is completely non existent. I attempted to talk to him and explain that sometimes I hear voices ect and his response was ""Do you think they're ghosts"". He's persistent I get up and continue doing things even if I'm crying my eyes out. I'm no longer allowed to smoke which I have used as a way of coping for years. I'm no longer allowed to eat without him watching me. I'm hungry all the time. I quite simply haven't got the energy for it. Because of my depressive behaviour I've lost all my friends and had to move away from what family I have. I'm really struggling and honestly just need some advice or a friend. Please..",4.383113367174282,5.9731597309644675,5.345197969543147,80.13207783417937,70.97969543147208,9.1112013536379,28.86937394247039,9.558583805096642,2.7382537394247035,805,31,150,19,15,264,126,197,0.172,0.7609999999999999,0.066,-0.9625,4,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,0,6,5,11,0,1,7,0,10,4,1,5,3,28,27,10,1,3,4,1,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,9,10,1,0,3,0,0,3,5,8,0,0,6,4,22,3,29,21,3,21,0,6,2,0,14,8,0,3,8,95,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12558515419149432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277485868377632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12074578779433,0.0,0.0,0.1566853275886078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694948921829121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14116969780137606,0.0,0.0,0.22138270646128624,0.0,0.0,0.13427272892626754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315047964442613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08488415097618615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115422509777887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985835607056592,0.0,0.06714473683273416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102786645351038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732147509483078,0.14484780232324282,0.0,0.0861421189158221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12753311854350996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475836545341197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11348271119250496,0.0,0.0,0.14377745407250547,0.28058259241951594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590294646514667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27318609290797885,0.0,0.09529359745797523,0.09912009840827388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107288119568345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12297324514385105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13669346305314078,0.0,0.0,0.0823311690870587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889188894247487,0.0,0.12710642629345206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435368969755526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662865843715747,0.1032969559681466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538086808165071,0.08234839230875313,0.0,0.0,0.07493919428137445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379054742661953,0.0,0.11099727369621536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10201067388110556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11913638451906867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12388563336303875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2482818655252167
mentalhealth,Approximately400Bees,2020/04/10,"I Don't Know What's Wrong With Me.. I'm on the verge of a panic attack. Something has been wrong with me recently, I just don't know what. I was hoping one of you guys might know. I'm on mobile, because I'm at work. 

I am 20F, have anxiety and depression, and am on Lexapro, Propranolol, Iron, and birth control. The Propranolol is for my naturally fast and uneven heart rate. Idc if that's too much info, I need answers. 

Recently I've been having ""spells"" where I'll start feeling very light, which scares me. Not FAINT, per say, but light. My focus will leave my eyes and all my sensory perception will go to my ears. So I'll just be listening while staring into space with dull eyes. These light spells often make me feel nauseous, and sometimes anxious. I can still function, it's just like controlling my limbs from behind a wall. 

I dissociate often, with my body going on autopilot while my mind is somewhere else. I'll get to where I was trying to go without really remembering how I got there. That doesn't happen ALL THE TIME, but more than I'd like. I had one of the light spells while driving to work and it crossed my mind that I may pass out. Strangely, I didn't get scared. I was just chill with it. 

Notably, I do have a lot on my plate right now. I'm in college, all classes were moved to online which is the WORST way to learn in my case. I'm failing a class that I've already failed once, and if I fail it again my parents aren't going to help me with tuition anymore. I work PRN at a hospital, but that's not enough to pay my tuition so I'd have to drop out.

There's the overwhelming threat of COVID, especially since I work in the hospital, and quarantine is driving me crazy. 

I already know I have anxiety and depression, but I'm wondering if there may be something else going on. Please help, having suggestions as to what's going on and what to do will ease the fear this is causing me.",3.5155334051724125,4.8410352552083316,4.416325431034483,86.98406250000002,72.75,7.796551724137932,26.78304597701149,8.326086129247049,1.6392971623563215,1494,52,313,24,29,483,188,384,0.17600000000000002,0.768,0.055999999999999994,-0.9938,1,1,2,0,0,0,54.0,0,1,0,9,18,19,2,5,13,0,37,6,5,5,3,64,65,25,0,5,14,1,2,2,0,6,1,3,0,1,17,20,0,2,12,0,3,11,8,16,0,2,9,12,40,3,42,48,8,46,0,7,3,0,8,21,0,11,14,200,57,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176958783469188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15091345570889647,0.11143128048716752,0.09782100124424843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122133704089632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060127954919600886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095630248782298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132695733712163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212586648636967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16991111546875032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479644251085548,0.0,0.0,0.10191797345123148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11099359589301913,0.0997472557760116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10306710325723302,0.0,0.3363447119737425,0.0,0.07888869842658547,0.0,0.0,0.09766574011587406,0.08722401828059438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688484411161815,0.1322280655773679,0.0,0.0,0.0979683982934841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2168323798116158,0.0,0.0,0.10444191578634343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963777193773776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385730874676615,0.0,0.0,0.06584069540895006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463784357139437,0.19918969265599812,0.0,0.0,0.104835094209722,0.07250924915286946,0.0731377879506866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504475822737852,0.13367742372611624,0.0,0.0,0.11572879587005047,0.10952426975395907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082733651128289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06318913071863963,0.0,0.194783482775712,0.0,0.11173603801840068,0.08423511615790093,0.0,0.07843978209186138,0.1975048847378517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08159321354242666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15187054491115334,0.09755411802476822,0.0,0.06981549208160846,0.0,0.0787713149575969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05751579378628829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06696777568932162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138552380355553,0.0,0.0782931407150747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508216107633292,0.1069671834924128,0.28723447378908024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156872724033112,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,meg_bundy,2020/04/10,"trichotillomania  I started hair picking incessantly probably about 2 years ago now. I very rarely wear my hair down because of this, my hair has visibly got a lot thinner. When I was at my worst I did form a slight bald patch on the lower left hand side of my head but it could be hidden quite well. Over that summer my anxiety had eased a large amount and it eventually got a lot better. I am now at a point where my anxiety is pretty bad again and as a symptom of OCD I have started to hair pick more frequently. I am currently receiving CBT for this so hopefully it will ease pretty soon. I am worried about the general condition of my hair, I'm naturally brunette and I bleach (responsibly with an expensive hair dresser with olaplaex treatments etc) my hair blonde. Being brunette is incredibly triggering and I'm terrified of having to go darker again.  I was wondering whether anyone had any experience with hair loss/trichotillomania and could advise me on any shampoos or treatments in order to get my hair back to a good condition (have no intention to bleach it anytime soon as we are in quarantine and I won't need my roots done for a few more months). Promote hair growth/treat damaged hair follicles etc. I am desperate ! thank you xx",7.03521978021978,7.531457662393162,7.267032967032971,72.73153846153849,64.25641025641025,11.301098901098905,35.94505494505496,11.062562989136584,4.117192673992673,999,45,181,27,14,324,144,234,0.12,0.726,0.154,0.8942,2,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,1,0,3,13,8,0,0,11,0,23,16,15,5,0,26,35,13,0,4,3,0,12,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,7,10,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,3,1,0,8,13,25,5,27,21,10,31,0,1,1,0,4,12,0,5,16,123,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336906924059556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20512226389133265,0.0,0.2307500848161364,0.0,0.0,0.10545516457327248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596941615386172,0.12592638675512902,0.0919370021204863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13338590098017108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2408311445806862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15433875579913545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364029560465321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475285411939377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879596523266809,0.0,0.08571311114575537,0.12649863775434544,0.2412452059686827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478235669171128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14979589533174958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16386375120783606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564394409348685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038116026893382,0.0,0.0,0.11182933088113388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14257136969934067,0.0,0.0,0.3068714148430641,0.16260686885792575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041306988960144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134989308095442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675722149033192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885257252254027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444030542048637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13560312453920825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355524129689922,0.0,0.1531625819969259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712158225477556
mentalhealth,GussleSprout,2020/04/10,"I don't know what to do anymore I have always been depressed. I think. That or it's just an emotional imbalance in my brain or something. Every day is harder. I feel so alone. I can't talk to my family or my partner anymore. My family doesn't understand. My partner is annoyed with my issues. I think about suicide often. Ive been thinking about getting on antidepressants, but I'm scared they might make it worse and push me over the edge. I don't even know how possible it all is with the current situation to get them. I'm sick of crying every day until my eyes are swollen. I don't know what to do anymore.",1.3067972350230406,3.7142465000000016,3.28041474654378,87.31919354838709,84.0,6.123502304147466,24.17972350230415,7.447530270364453,1.3100271889400923,482,19,96,8,14,162,76,124,0.20199999999999999,0.7879999999999999,0.01,-0.9745,1,1,1,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,2,0,8,3,1,1,3,0,16,4,2,2,1,21,29,8,1,0,5,0,1,0,2,1,2,0,0,2,6,3,0,0,8,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,2,2,19,0,13,26,1,8,0,1,1,0,5,3,0,5,4,67,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964738543866774,0.0,0.0,0.12826070962983313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4586102635983173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720764249463292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16932067652985544,0.19882111383125067,0.0,0.13276457417503235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17339200092598592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10181109752159667,0.0,0.25974705709309537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2906277434534021,0.0,0.0779401742004679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16106845085031885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16088698231681794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541416301131513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1028927609031552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635231303852495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17377494923191164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15432570051329192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17326506197389838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866809401629608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16860924492126034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389564290638284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2963090319102768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16047003256639478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15708658267789707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,asippycup,2020/04/10,"To everyone new here. I am offering my experience so you can get well!! And get some great support First I like to say thank you for reaching out for help. Please feel free to dm I was abused as a child, was told nothing wrong with me that I’m making excuse and I’m lazy. I really have no family I can talk to my mom lives in my same town barely talk to me cause toxic abuses husband. I’ve been homeless and became a alcoholic and got addicted to drugs. Trying to cover the pain. So I would love to help Anyone in need pleAse feel free to dm me",0.5138259109311747,2.7457050789473705,2.631754385964914,91.8131781376518,85.9298245614035,5.9638326585695,17.541160593792178,7.321109707123232,0.24946099865047305,425,10,93,7,13,143,76,114,0.109,0.595,0.29600000000000004,0.9721,0,0,2,0,2,0,9.0,0,2,0,1,4,10,0,0,3,0,8,5,0,2,0,14,21,7,0,2,0,2,2,1,0,1,4,1,0,1,1,6,1,0,2,0,2,0,1,2,1,1,5,3,14,10,16,15,2,6,0,0,0,1,14,4,0,1,3,54,15,0,0.0,0.3668111386433071,0.0,0.16874830056178458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542770240305552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823555887861236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15901607053404074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17951188776345608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479122936346731,0.0,0.15141822755942355,0.14592600006321058,0.0,0.15653698755883153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316676911665914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617469446631367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380289671191792,0.17066092349062234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207510300861737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07562452591679887,0.0,0.13668593156603326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397076220284508,0.0,0.10332619216351677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18129285347617202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477778424527264,0.0,0.1495010027917144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14852901087196446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647117220864625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.339834640577566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916499548988976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12309839602007468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756583885942211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488350957793145,0.0,0.14251351130619952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479122936346731,0.0,0.1050949601406781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13917838950399938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996121120132256,0.16924293111688374,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vintage_speech,2020/04/10,"Paranoia anxiety fear I went to sleep around 2 paranoid and scared, I then woke up at 6. I was too scared to move and everything scared me, it all started with a dream that scared me and I’m still paranoid and paralyzed from fear my body feels like it wants to run but I’m too scared to move. This happens not a lot up enough for me to think “oh god not this again” I’m still scared right now and I can’t move. What’s wrong with me??? It’s such extreme fear I’m dizzy",-0.8482036775106074,1.2887390099009934,0.4255516265912327,104.86101485148515,94.54455445544556,4.0738330975954735,16.125176803394627,5.773587663045528,-0.9168902404526164,364,9,92,3,14,113,60,101,0.33,0.617,0.053,-0.9798,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,8,11,0,9,2,0,2,2,2,0,1,16,13,7,0,1,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,0,2,1,0,5,3,10,0,0,3,1,9,1,13,10,3,16,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,7,52,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09000595447959092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10473812880807762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13068847417897814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156933834711635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057409643066084,0.0,0.0,0.397184644373004,0.05949003633021016,0.08405294369579573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10404216087972573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05748041871004391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000262975675468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37514677559984944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047695210314024,0.0,0.0,0.7067606628597262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11774023264403327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327700101690874,0.0,0.1879192906972319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07538874208814188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06939612270780794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090676079278731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12863756071696086,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whet_pastry,2020/04/10,"I don't know what to do I think I'm bipolar. I haven't been diagnosed but I recognise the symptoms, and I'm pretty sure that's what it is. I don't really have anyone to talk to about it, and I'm scared to tell anyone. I hate feeling like this and I don't know what to do about it",-0.2167179487179496,1.1881781230769235,2.4319230769230766,96.9222435897436,83.15384615384616,5.564102564102565,18.525641025641026,6.42735559955562,-0.28782051282051313,218,5,56,2,6,76,33,65,0.13699999999999998,0.675,0.188,0.3291,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,1,1,0,9,3,0,0,1,9,17,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,1,7,2,7,16,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,36,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3969664855365639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28811443703666706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14352939655765293,0.2027914089779363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28025542599797426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31200678541379545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13868086691929374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28879018764709863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18184957030627671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28419585785166085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675370234707932,0.2950418006993716,0.0,0.2281579050200382,0.2481083150412908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188761222283334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Galactic_Gecko,2020/04/10,"Randomly feeling scared A couple days ago I was just on my computer when I suddenly started feeling terrified. It only lasted a few seconds but it confused the heck out of me. It happened again on the same day when I went to bed.

The night before that I did have a dream about going on theme park rapids which made me have a panic attack in the dream but not irl (I have this thing about being on top of water). It wasn't something that particularly stuck with me though, I only remembered the dream when I was trying to think what might have caused the random moments of fear.

I also haven't really had any problems with mental health in the past so that's why I'm just confused about this whole thing.

Anyone have any advice? (If you want to ask questions I'll try to respond quickly)",4.0202688172042995,5.617644483870971,4.6733064516129055,84.56329301075269,71.90322580645163,6.973118279569893,25.174731182795696,7.492282038375204,1.2378924731182797,625,19,119,7,12,200,98,155,0.18100000000000002,0.737,0.08199999999999999,-0.9661,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,1,13,7,1,5,11,0,13,2,0,2,0,24,25,9,0,3,6,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,13,3,1,0,5,3,0,2,3,7,0,1,8,2,13,0,19,15,3,24,0,0,0,0,4,8,1,7,14,87,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15553216305681375,0.14108832498060725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272825293869704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21647248666182384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11129041418244977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14879584451269506,0.18107079867363887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13543592176904026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16350416198475426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17611074333042526,0.0,0.20529383198442253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910253459780906,0.1609551090306034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09045595518130868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074724425468066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16918274085655025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12973902275440188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506038030266558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16039878754800976,0.16884670550316402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493636181546259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421011451884415,0.0,0.18674339271120172,0.0,0.0,0.15193901652159605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229741873927932,0.0,0.0,0.17829889621898354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019638419647996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18030056107292372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15934984882412562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253139158837145,0.0,0.0,0.11265633377678312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2114815430517981,0.10198517223223597,0.15637676049939486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21612234950736306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387841381317326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147545621154909,0.14361977882848784,0.17769971581907718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vlokk,2020/04/10,"I need serious help My girlfriend ( gf ) lately have been experience suicidal ideation. Sometimes in the day she’s completely sane, but sometimes she’ll go insane and keep thinking about suiciding to end her life and do nonsensical things such as walking around in the house without the lights on ( which she usually is scared of ) and when her relatives calls her she’d be freaked out like someone pulled her ( as she say when she is sane ). Is there any way I can make it better ?",9.96215909090909,8.311401806818182,8.544545454545457,72.9868181818182,59.34090909090909,12.436363636363636,41.31818181818181,11.20814326018867,4.4669227272727285,381,17,70,8,4,116,68,88,0.142,0.767,0.09,-0.631,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,3,0,10,1,0,1,0,11,15,8,2,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,0,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,1,2,13,2,11,11,0,15,0,0,0,0,15,5,0,0,7,46,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310889280950303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17160449103312467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17048773205568465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19683779757374226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20211370038574367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12431948648236806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17073533275427702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18856420518820136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10955456175873496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920840370754547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224285224797556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17134115724211912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21745082943577365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615782003396948,0.09417676360423252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286742132336123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14293511427466016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15329694171963798,0.19299451118786126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16333179777833684,0.0,0.3813051884269637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4217140592539261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806656965073013,0.12351802407477573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212306843941941,0.0,0.0,0.1530103565967392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858215833392553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ChaosPredator,2020/04/10,"Mood swings? I have been depressed, undiagnosed, for the last 9 years of my life.

I kinda learned how to cope with it more or less but what irks me alot is mood swings.

I am searching online and there is nothing like it.

I experience  several mood swings daily.

Around 6 pm I feel happy and confident and that nothing can stop me. When I wake up I feel like shit, doesn't matter when I wake up.

My positive mood reaches its maximum at 6 pm or midnight and if I don't sleep, feel worthless in 3 am in the morning or when I wake up. 

There is bipolar disorder but that is meant for people who have mood swings weekly or monthly.

Nothing ever comes up for daily or hourly mood swings. These mood swings are absolutely awful. When I feel overly positive I am aware of it, same for overly negative.

Since I am aware, I can sort of know that what I am feeling is irrational but its so annoying.


Is there a name to this sort of disease?",3.194774774774775,4.842886675675679,4.33675675675676,85.93720720720722,74.13513513513513,7.527927927927928,26.387387387387392,8.238735603445708,1.6490792792792788,725,26,148,12,15,237,99,185,0.16699999999999998,0.6990000000000001,0.133,-0.7956,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,11,14,2,0,4,1,19,7,5,1,1,34,27,19,0,1,9,0,5,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,13,7,0,1,8,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,2,5,19,3,21,25,4,22,0,2,0,0,2,10,1,10,13,103,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15745071620870832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235679646964165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152336824576884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20270694977133846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15998794114735596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730116093085069,0.0,0.0,0.4471508577662925,0.12635509470102949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18828010953603025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17418012483496353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720245822300393,0.1441716654035778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12492765284112944,0.17281830784769325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14117497604191975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5091311055640477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226185450380916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998113823350564,0.18155326520583398,0.14630768591902887,0.0,0.1769965166205382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14787022316742146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14187347004435266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11389769808947132
mentalhealth,Kylinth,2020/04/10,"I've found myself over the last month spacing out, for hours on end. I'm worried, this is new for me I have had mental health issues my whole life and have MOSTLY handled them, bipolar 2 is my current diagnosis but it's been through several to get to that one. At once point it was thought to be schizophrenia. Usually my issue is emotions and being unable to deescelate myself, flying into a violent rage until I literally am too tired to move or there is nothing left  to break.

But now I have this new thing happening and I'm really freaking out about it. I will be talking to a friend one moment and the next thing I know it's hours later and I'm still holding my drink I got from the fridge in my arm, which is now exhausted from that. I recently finished my work from home, closed the client used to connect and the next thing I knew it was 4 in the morning, I was staring at my monitors that had obviously gone into sleep mode by then. I checked my internet history just to see and i hadn't done anything in hours. I don't know what this is, I hope this is the right place to ask a question like this.",3.896983333333335,4.935166195555556,4.8934861111111125,85.02556250000002,71.48888888888891,7.936111111111113,28.729166666666664,8.278499904357787,1.8805166666666664,874,33,180,13,16,286,133,225,0.10300000000000001,0.846,0.051,-0.9134,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,1,7,7,2,0,10,0,24,8,2,1,1,27,40,12,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,1,5,0,1,0,18,12,1,1,6,1,1,2,2,4,0,2,13,2,25,3,30,23,2,41,0,0,2,0,5,17,0,4,22,128,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026467648415369,0.0,0.11661094134660142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12764781886693166,0.0,0.12219339376075275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403107531237631,0.11047871187360116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676613941212662,0.09637040969784592,0.0,0.06516919904780652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976244850024417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030327290543418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13258810241301622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511997005353825,0.12389058869440578,0.3685182989698049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26038310344337384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710283954217084,0.1016761564970194,0.0,0.0,0.1355255867181934,0.0,0.08810443817460935,0.06093951008016889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570413957515547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956276025056572,0.13257419498242212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409408259073071,0.26531543640646715,0.0,0.0,0.11968716557889827,0.0,0.0,0.13283933556885574,0.16904813193910884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303221460214602,0.0,0.11791545345018085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973241119231494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990881488506177,0.0,0.12316134983006365,0.0,0.0,0.10652351484078612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939811801432943,0.0,0.0,0.14091571546541073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248256755095411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09961400566225452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025774471780782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486063561801749,0.0,0.0,0.0990261277061836,0.0,0.1433652147560193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077315030855258,0.13737863312927964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926283497062447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080899726576376,0.126675049456662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,impure_dumbass,2020/04/10,"I’m confused and don’t know who to talk to Okay so I’m emotionally detached and I’m anti-social, but I’m not violent I just like my space when I want it and get irritated if denied that which seems entitled I know it’s just idk I get really agitated when I’m not alone when needed, I’m really uncomfortable talking to people I don’t know and it makes my life hard when ordering food for instance, I try to avoid talking to people I don’t know as much as possible, this is mostly because I don’t handle the whole “talking” part properly, I mumble and mess up my words sometimes and the idea of it makes me anxious and irritated, I don’t like social gatherings unless it’s like two of my close friends, I can make friends and be talkative if I’m in the right mood but recently found that difficult it was something I did as a child and now not so much, I don’t know what it is with me but it’s really confusing me and my mother is not making it any easier by labelling me psychotic and telling me I need to be medicated, I’m not a violent person unless extremely provoked, and I’ve learnt to cry it out in recent days, I don’t particularly want to label myself I just wanna figure out what’s going on with me to be honest. I wouldn’t say I lack empathy though it’s seems to be that way for some people, I do very much care about others feelings I just tend to not realise it straight away or I’m not sure what to say to the situation. 

Thanks for any help, really appreciate it.",2.2114634439634417,3.998574775974028,4.6433044733044735,82.09024771524774,77.21428571428571,8.1993265993266,24.719095719095716,8.94667605116694,1.9486496873496881,1173,41,242,28,27,412,146,308,0.188,0.664,0.14800000000000002,-0.8581,0,2,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,0,13,18,2,3,6,1,19,3,0,5,1,66,51,30,0,9,19,1,2,3,2,1,2,2,0,2,23,17,1,1,11,0,0,1,15,7,0,1,3,4,32,10,35,43,8,22,0,0,0,0,16,11,0,9,11,161,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081882791797354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14207174338684678,0.0,0.0,0.11800921874710893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814290345634294,0.0,0.0,0.06367738891540985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650316666899254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474358050386707,0.06736757420391612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11750259581244568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0528177351764828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263125390869973,0.11453417533862575,0.16140991402159302,0.0,0.10915129289315094,0.0,0.05936659873274041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357496962898758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700168330068847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11792177781733988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870403582905064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737826571209561,0.15310053853768024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789094406169489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052317041610218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23036870276623084,0.15491041975320718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311918768615348,0.0,0.21725667278936048,0.09120978744781293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776210847605155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26767708014534913,0.0,0.20628181356894515,0.0,0.0,0.08920762828360944,0.0,0.16614037571649412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19019155498757292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741657306456607,0.0,0.10648304996148523,0.0,0.08041783365186607,0.10331286873250924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09845160639206617,0.0,0.0,0.33584155148116807,0.09130198825625546,0.0961720423604365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263068222634536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07092097349844753,0.0,0.10204150820029352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618982066250107,0.12322554355524486,0.08291489004389066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166250215677678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Spridis,2020/04/10,"How do I ask for help The title says most of it. 
So umm, The last month has been really hard on me, I don’t know if it’s because of quarantine or something else, but my mental state has dropped so so much, it’s making me hard to sleep, to think, to do anything. I can’t even spend 10 minutes in the morning to eat cereal in peace, my mind is already taking me to the darkest places possible. 
I have a problem with overthinking and over analyzing everything. I might say something to someone and that persons response will be in my mind for at least a day and I will come up with every possible that will hurt me. 
I just want it to stop, it’s hurting me so much. It’s hard for me to open up, I just want to wake up and feel like everything is okay at least for a minute, but I can’t. Suicidal thoughts come back as well, I try to ignore them but they just don’t leave, I’m so scared that I don’t wake up one day. 
I don’t know what to do, I’m feeling so low I can’t even gather the strength to call my therapist. 
I’m in tears and this is taking way to wrong to write. 
I’m sorry for being like this.",1.058095238095241,2.5880215042016843,2.9602521008403366,94.02494397759104,79.75630252100841,6.382072829131652,22.257703081232492,7.2636822038024595,0.5420341736694683,850,26,203,11,21,285,120,238,0.196,0.6990000000000001,0.10400000000000001,-0.9772,0,1,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,2,1,14,12,0,1,8,1,23,4,3,2,0,36,41,18,1,4,8,0,5,2,0,4,0,2,0,1,12,10,1,2,6,0,1,2,7,7,2,1,2,7,25,5,36,33,5,26,0,3,0,0,10,15,0,4,8,134,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945323720895802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09653519129381072,0.0,0.10966794274738062,0.0,0.0,0.0902032675087394,0.0,0.07151038843916446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978545561930552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20210238058089025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15130901192967894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003624359816725,0.0979964945847682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549627831030452,0.0,0.0988377687939013,0.0,0.2108592673068788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186297624095316,0.08380546857550354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31525707352296434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862965192014594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511631084088018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12893975628516194,0.09562237282988724,0.0,0.1242131380852475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11462236090970655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830457081226774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821973326723915,0.1244461556896838,0.2368970026330435,0.0,0.09363480789059292,0.0,0.1724710105070798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949151529420423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102429566301961,0.12256278427696453,0.0,0.0,0.26449621330184736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11224873015488099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515105559244675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18657741790728627,0.11744662732269365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11739357282516642,0.0,0.09939541112102067,0.18062017365443164,0.0,0.13131765758258432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807545449775257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283168460312446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764033175420028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13620462081063228,0.0,0.07516677677441698,0.0,0.09313012637036787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964501135709028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13838360264690858,0.0931143078480461,0.0,0.0,0.10547474776972728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825881614939716,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gunvald11,2020/04/10,"I suspect I have ADHD or Autism. Any inputs? These are my ""issues"", any input?

​

* defensiveness
* selfishness
* lying
* self-esteem
* rumination
* cataosprhi thinking
* blaming others
* not listening
* worrying
* perfectionism
* afraid of criticism
* any remark is taken as criticism
* lack of empathy
* anger outburst
* forgetfulness
* love routine
* special interest mean  hyperfocus, everything else everyday stuff, boring
* neer finishing things
* problems with social interactions
* dislike touch
* Sensitive to sounds
* 90% of time daydreaming",8.675119047619049,11.012007861111117,7.70825396825397,45.90500000000003,116.22222222222223,11.371428571428574,42.31746031746032,8.418075326091056,8.035479365079365,434,28,34,18,21,134,66,72,0.35100000000000003,0.528,0.121,-0.9622,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,0,0,9,2,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,10,8,2,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,3,3,6,7,1,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,19,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628431622784019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23696880743117674,0.26575279149767084,0.44618452385186297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18270153001145795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19655963673648416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22827315542285384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973914933602932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382359027345013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20927294213978587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281589685750693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229441164149093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250367046442536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529912945693632,0.14013853435172022,0.0,0.0,0.12752973746852792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221074476063832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26575279149767084,0.0
mentalhealth,LocalScapegoat,2020/04/10,"Stressors vs Suicidal Thoughts Have there been any studies made that address the correlation between types of stressors and suicidal thoughts?

For example some practices interpret dreams to have symbolic meaning or definition that can then be applied to an individual's consciousness in order  to help with personal problems or conflicts.  Whether by luck, placebo effect, or legitimacy, some individuals can change their entire trajectory based on dreams.

Can the same approach be applied to treating suicidal thoughts?  Can we conclude what types of stressors an individual is dealing, or failing to deal with based on the form of suicide they imagine?  Or can we at least learn the intensity levels from how violent the suicide is?  If the suicide thoughts are violent, or peaceful can these indicate a person's level of reasonableness, or other important details that can help to more effectively treat the affected areas of a person's psyche?",13.39525974025974,12.597202292207792,11.9925974025974,48.26603896103899,52.05194805194805,14.774025974025975,55.766233766233775,13.484332010920856,8.01314025974026,779,52,97,23,7,248,97,154,0.26899999999999996,0.609,0.122,-0.9875,0,0,0,0,0,3,13.0,2,0,2,4,2,7,2,0,11,0,15,0,0,7,0,37,21,12,6,2,10,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,6,5,0,1,13,2,0,1,0,4,0,0,6,0,4,3,21,13,6,10,0,1,0,0,11,7,0,11,1,76,10,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803081289548012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12492804116355548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2434999401468269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583121518770426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174361990346302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286392416749391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30934599087817416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300023326016845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142054143786005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7750555491932709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3750145231533533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Katanafatal,2020/04/10,"Think I had a 2-4 hr panic attack last night I could not relax for the life of me and when I kinda did I tried to lying down to sleep however my mind even began worrying in overload, I think I even fainted for a slipt second. Now I have a brain fog, I can't think straight. My left said head hurts",0.6528205128205151,2.273689076923077,2.7950000000000017,94.31916666666667,81.30769230769229,5.564102564102565,18.525641025641026,6.42735559955562,-0.1872051282051284,230,5,54,2,6,78,50,65,0.332,0.6679999999999999,0.0,-0.9632,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,1,4,0,5,5,3,0,0,8,10,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,3,0,1,4,1,11,1,7,5,0,9,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,1,5,34,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25543115444687364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2506456792371684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792660329835875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29659509372235554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304288268719124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24036011804386215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18301895502596394,0.0,0.0,0.24394855308256586,0.0,0.15858961199363728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267076238937009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21070278419859026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634333130187521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21357598962094704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22468851576658466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4316022871257558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15243866388399974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22801742294517405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sholandayomama,2020/04/10,"Best online therapists? Looking for a really good online therapists (either a company or a specific therapist), please let me know where you have had great experiences. This has been long overdue for me and I want to make sure it's worth my money before paying. Would like a therapist that can video chat, talk on the phone, text, readily available most times etc. someone personable, relatively young and really great at what they do. Let me know. Thanks!",5.0005000000000015,7.993790050000001,5.420000000000004,74.01500000000001,73.5,10.0,27.5,10.125756701596842,3.5985,364,14,58,12,8,116,66,80,0.0,0.688,0.312,0.98,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,1,1,7,0,0,5,0,9,0,0,1,1,11,15,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,7,7,5,10,4,6,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,2,4,38,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461732964941866,0.0,0.15368921143841946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16332936949353374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325524304949142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12283448985715982,0.0,0.3229211234044489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609691029798402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2995080906123246,0.0,0.07154759380908733,0.0,0.0,0.12960277433189296,0.12298029277979118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977558581311094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278736355742447,0.0,0.16075704628582535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18763798467170434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408577950991767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13802646831823004,0.0,0.0,0.11771017498907015,0.0,0.13483058168801998,0.0,0.6801543997061142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539560134880116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637942643511462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403318207168884,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BetrubnisOtokonoko,2020/04/10,"I don't know what this is I don't know who my reflection is in the mirror and I need to look at my I.D at times to remember my name. This has been going for around 3 years and I'm 18 now, it's getting worse and worse.",2.5852941176470594,1.827688705882352,4.459607843137256,93.36823529411768,73.70588235294119,8.368627450980393,22.882352941176467,7.793537801064563,0.5397529411764697,168,3,46,2,3,58,36,51,0.131,0.8690000000000001,0.0,-0.7351,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,10,13,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,4,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,7,12,0,8,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,3,29,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.280897585449156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16485667767590484,0.0,0.17932870921792418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34682517135548124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2649742113680049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23396898434261298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35744541996894474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839939685475641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6431246340552531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20319747761033
mentalhealth,indigazo_maker,2020/04/10,"I'm afraid of hurting myself or my family during the outbreak Hi, A little backstory, I'm a 25 year old programmer/game designer, I was working at a small company developing commercial web sites for all sorts of clients. 

Sadly, job started to get stale, my boss started to take advatage of me and started overworking me like hell. At the sime time a friend of mine who's working at a game development company (whe knows I'm also a game developer) offered me a chance to send a resume to his company and get an interview, he told me how safe it was and that he had talk to his bosses about me.

Without thinking that much about it I quitted my job and prepared myself for this important  interview, I took it and It went well I'll say, I really connected with my potential employer and I seemed to have all the skills he was looking for, so of course I got really excited and validated (working at game development company is a dream job for me). 

Sadly, a couple of days after the interview the COVID-19 outbreak got really serious, causing me to lose EVERY job oportunity I had (including my dream job that I was sure I got), pretty much every company I tried to send my resume to has said that they would love to hire me, but they cannot because of the current economy. 

This honestly has made all of my insecurities and depression to come back to haunt me, I feel like shit, like a no talent nobody. I can't even motivate myself to work on personal projects and my mood is awful and violent, in fact I'm pretty sure my GF (F25) is about to break up with me because of my mood swings. Making me feel way more lonely (we haven't talk to each other for like 3 days now) 

I'm super afraid of this, I feel alone even while living with my parents right now, I honestly don't feel like I'm gonna make it, My GF has tried to ""cheer"" me up by telling me that is out of my control and that Everyone is having a terrible time right now with the outbreak... but honestly that doesn't make me feel better at all. If anything it makes me feel worse.

What could I do to repress this feelings? or at least how should I try to live this out without hurting myself? 

Ps: English is not my first language so I'm sorry if it's hard to read

TLDR: I quitted my job so i could get a new oportunity at  a dream job and that oportunity is probbably gone forever because of COVID-19",5.5540191897654605,5.6638443219616255,6.793246268656716,76.19195895522391,67.40085287846482,10.45266524520256,33.38113006396589,10.290406445055957,3.374043496801706,1853,78,362,44,28,630,213,469,0.134,0.7240000000000001,0.142,-0.353,11,3,0,0,0,2,50.0,1,0,2,13,16,37,3,4,22,1,28,2,1,12,7,66,69,25,0,6,9,1,8,5,3,3,0,2,0,1,23,21,0,3,11,7,0,6,9,16,1,1,15,11,58,19,60,49,9,44,1,7,1,1,31,18,2,6,23,235,81,21,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07608565281085793,0.0,0.05874844272891956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060453900857275526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05648861640910489,0.0,0.1343473361898341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497217322242099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07546687626781734,0.0,0.06328198615917513,0.0,0.0,0.08239515289547619,0.1173086715167622,0.08128556187817286,0.0,0.09475528958314294,0.0,0.06327369075607958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704341598875164,0.0,0.1237917197975019,0.07019717393801009,0.0,0.0,0.06925450587505458,0.0,0.26001617956712153,0.10496415702210016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062487705326684025,0.0,0.0,0.05675743607158551,0.0,0.11514436828865075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17626554076662854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06580853956600602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15728761140109065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5103057834107864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04037341791399245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.179451885617865,0.07362936099238693,0.1297385886898391,0.0,0.06169053145814564,0.0821864572178859,0.0,0.0,0.06630334776782874,0.06951259485085852,0.196148852956584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800771439106913,0.0,0.0,0.07095115381549875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07708720262981225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157211793447378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414517610708349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14947683807419002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15627417421811146,0.0734830154314682,0.0,0.14118709674313332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12547423223897844,0.06988026452452625,0.058420833756076665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687807926171445,0.0,0.0,0.07540885265461672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223596541229614,0.1559927557570889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13847627117117636,0.0,0.05523513511834965,0.1180937707817903,0.06421001823927404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04707221076561857,0.0,0.0,0.08567388989435169,0.0,0.0,0.07019717393801009,0.08162024633732128,0.14962993979171266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05831161734488135,0.0,0.0,0.06605218116997767,0.06810106238515214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14163168171231555,0.0,0.21392814965490706,0.0,0.07486521096498794,0.05218610353104585,0.0,0.0,0.04730785052635325
mentalhealth,Chilly_Butt,2020/04/10,"Does anyone else obsess over games you don’t even own to cope? Recently I’ve been having bad thoughts and strong urges to cut again, but I’ve been resisting these urges with help from my girlfriend and animal crossing new horizons videos. I’ve never really been a fan of animal crossing and I don’t even own a switch, but watching videos (funny moments, wholesome moments, or just people talking about their builds) calm my mind when I feel like I’m going insane! I usually play Toca Kitchen 2 (a kids game for like $2 on the App Store) to calm me down, but recently New Horizons feels so much more calming. Being in quarantine I feel like I’m not contributing to a community of people like I used to when at school. Animal Crossing makes me feel useful when I feel I can’t do anything in the real world even when it’s not really me playing. When I’m doing schoolwork and getting overwhelmed I think about what my world and character would look like if I had the game and it always calms me. In a world where I feel like I can’t do anything, it’s nice to look at an alternative world where you control everything and everything is wholesome even if they’re living on tents and the world is called “poopsvill” or something. A nice little world where you can wear what you want without judgement and naruto run away from a tarantula like it’s nobody’s business while a bunch of furries sing in the background over an unconscious seagull washed up on the beach. What a world!",7.0103552631578925,6.924064077192984,6.634769736842108,79.22057565789474,64.36842105263158,9.651315789473683,32.900219298245624,9.188382445141503,2.746548245614035,1182,43,221,18,16,369,150,285,0.046,0.754,0.2,0.993,0,1,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,4,1,2,17,20,1,2,17,0,17,3,1,4,1,38,36,23,0,4,11,0,6,7,1,1,1,0,1,1,8,10,1,1,8,9,1,5,8,4,0,0,5,9,23,16,30,29,5,45,0,1,3,0,13,25,0,4,22,135,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543945275559408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08020079290018342,0.11752353755592675,0.1887763855023795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10776427250321008,0.0,0.09576957283869417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712135773753825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864562026564394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003746002643806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581699581094694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30303264218483644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20616963512675365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34797410344148605,0.24582475930771466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05992593074570896,0.0,0.06518656059803263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688088293945848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3922558263519405,0.11495936935325088,0.10128205742615942,0.0,0.19263795029345945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765630318236225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115814138072467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431757769137217,0.0,0.08846358527726474,0.22155563453439714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1590368497709941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13055352544024995,0.14695930521598347,0.0,0.22650450299535616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608235852645307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830153821190441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219138418860988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734950241417733,0.0,0.09105885844297827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1981276642144536,0.12632566573061885,0.0,0.06765293560400239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11056654974753656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081479473270898,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RawUnfilteredHoney,2020/04/10,"Blackout in a virtual-MH IOP I (42F) am finally ""dealing"" with my mental health problems.  I was suicidal and hallucinating about 6 weeks ago.  Spent 2 weeks inpatient, 3 weeks in PHP, and this was my second week in IOP.  Everything has been helpful and I'm  doing great.  Monday was a very productive day.  

This past Tuesday, I was seated at a table, using my laptop to participate in a ""virtual IOP"".  I was writing some notes and suddenly, my field of vision telescoped into a small point of light.  I started to fall forward and thankfully came back awake before my head even hit the table.

The IOP therapist called me an hour later when the group session had ended.  I told her that I have had this happen many times, I've already been tested and all my physicians know about it.  

On Thursday, an hour before the next IOP group was scheduled to start, she called me again.  This time, she told me I need to have my medications reviewed before continuing the program.  I immediately messaged my doctors, asking if they thought it might be a medication issue. 

It's not.  I've already been tested for everything.  The last time I had this same blackout experience was in the days and weeks before my hallucinations.

I'm not sure if I should I try to continue this process, or take a break.  Whether or not I continue IOP, I also have my weekly CBT therapist to help me.  And... I'm also on the waitlist for EMDR.

I live alone and I'm retired.  My fear is that I will ""lose my head"" again and may end up hurting myself.  Not sure which is the greater risk:

1)  Continue IOP online, hoping that the therapist will call me if I blackout again.

2)  Quitting IOP and just follow my treatment in weekly CBT.

I appreciate your consideration and thoughts you might have for me.",4.074883470004316,6.157235235649551,5.205251402675877,78.79878776435048,72.7764350453172,7.870565386275357,29.04197237807509,8.634040054169528,2.404956754423824,1377,57,248,26,28,454,176,331,0.073,0.857,0.069,-0.1088,0,1,0,0,0,1,52.0,0,2,1,2,11,10,0,2,19,0,29,7,2,1,3,44,51,21,1,7,11,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,0,13,15,0,0,4,0,1,4,4,5,0,1,19,1,44,5,25,24,4,56,0,2,0,0,19,14,0,10,39,166,57,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07352495575014324,0.0,0.0,0.08590509126597842,0.1830617927634408,0.13266076186289172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07754155338583006,0.0,0.0,0.06377890665111695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823173400468756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540856535390477,0.09486597404602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10698418819917756,0.08551174325073116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489681907541377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14692773826912006,0.0,0.0,0.05478380745447413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14908964938310448,0.08113526280670416,0.0,0.09333519221276768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086122662779823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144618254636762,0.0,0.0,0.07334720932580639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17024918820981427,0.08816571843825904,0.0,0.0,0.11119138737050592,0.0,0.0,0.08238222405473414,0.16336649616372806,0.0,0.08879339345360927,0.0,0.0,0.08657210928608512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0455839178937302,0.06761052630255113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07324117550667429,0.0,0.0,0.09279325138579053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409231672032799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16711494477158256,0.08358816194369767,0.17598120258900207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615020122690098,0.0,0.0,0.08821201011939375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07917954563572953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840900110346323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936631875958326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882212789321463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741654679152028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907274023526874,0.0,0.15634769859574196,0.0,0.06236365396280515,0.0,0.0,0.07636379965415256,0.0,0.2889135405862249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316967289595566,0.14509614609172491,0.0,0.0,0.1585133178458569,0.0,0.05631361130104143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163708654930155,0.0,0.06843758368602769,0.0,0.0,0.465729376563122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kenexenek,2020/04/10,"Horror, terror, pain and toys Uncertain of the title.
Woke early with some clarity. Took notes for clarity, I thought it was very helpful to me and thought I'd share in case it is for anyone else. I hope there are more such mornings ahead.
...

Clear lucidity this morning after waking from a dream. Clarity of memories. The forms of childhood, the stacks of experience unfolding ongoing which unwittingly comprises who I am.
To begin born with a defective ear which caused such constant blinding pain it was an experiential course in managing that pain through difficult acceptance, understanding, avoiding and distraction, strength and endurance and sometimes escape through medication, surgery, physical surrender and bursting eardrums and periods of alleviation. During times of alleviation there was ""normal childhood"" which I presume would be the standard experience growing up outside of intense lightening pain for most others though we all have our particular unique life paths. Some times were good and fun and most importantly safe. Unfortunately in the 70s in my neighborhood there were a few young boys slightly older than me who found their fun in kicking me around, maticulously torchering my happiness away through physical pain and violence, mental and emotional manipulation, continual betrayal of trust and cruel actions such as destroying my favorite toys. I was imprinted by pain and became branded as a child you could beat on. It continued out of the neighborhood into preschool, kindergarten and gradeschool, as did the gradually lessening but still regular intermittent anxiety through painful ear episodes until finally through puberty they had grown into place. Meanwhile a little plastic tube placed in my ear as an infant had fallen in and not out a few days after it was surgically implanted without the aid of anesthetic and would remain there agitating further the underlying conditions until eventually finding it's way out in my late thirties. 
Toys were a respite from the pain and filled my little world with wonder and escape however fleeting. Adults were largely not present in a positive way though I know I was loved and cared for by my mother despite her own troubles at the time dealing with my father and their relationship and I was adored by his father and my mother's mother. My father was incomplete and though he knew he ought to he had trouble loving me unconditionally. I imprinted largely on my mother and was absent a steady fatherly hand. Our interactions mostly ended in his frustration and/or domination. It was great to do things that would not end up that way, like tossing a ball, but there was little time for the opportunity of patience and space to align. Otherwise he'd have fun with me joining with my sister and tickling me excruciatingly. I hated that, would laugh-scream and wet my pants which seemed to be the point. Perhaps they just liked making me laugh so hard and thought I liked it, I can give them that break - though I seem to recall some recognition of foul play be mentioned by mom.

Gradually as I grew through the pain and childhood subordination I discovered fighting back against the bullies who found delight in me as a target and I would enjoy the chase for my part but not the beatings or taunting - finally after returning a first kick it was all over and so I began fighting anyone who'd challenge me for the next couple of years, quickly running through my few friends and finding myself a stringy haired loner with a can-do fuck-you attitude. I'd also discovered stealing icey treats in my shin guards from the local convenience store a way to make friends on the soccer team. I was shown to steal by some of those older bullies, as well as one time (after third grade I believe) being coerced and cajoled into entering through the window of my summer school classroom where a (substitute) young female teacher was really laying into me in an awful way for some reason I did not understand and completely turning the place over in a fury of resentment fueled retaliation. That preceded the notion of thieving, had set some stage. I was never approached or caught for it though I'm sure she must have known it was me - I believe she even returned to the classroom with the class (they were on a field trip somewhere and I was not allowed to accompany them I have the impression) as I scurried out the window, looking back at a distance finally and seeing her bewildered head tilting out the unfolded lower window I'd climbed in and out of. I was trouble for athority, talking back to teachers in little and big ways. I hated scouts. I was fiercely bullied there by an overgrown beanstalk named Kilo who'd mercilessly squeeze the back of my neck to make me yield to the suffering which I would not. Other scouts would look on without saying a word as I recall. Motherfucker.
I'd been graced by an insightful teacher in 7th grade who helped give me an experience through leadership camp that would change my trajectory by offering me positive alternate social experiences, reliable adult role models and meaningful usable tools for self growth, understanding and progressing with personal drive and command. Thank you Jeff Stark.

So this morning as I recall this alignment of important impactful experience, the small details of smells and small spaces and faces and names long forgotten, awkward situations, uncomfortable, mooreless, absent of positive role models, etc I realized something like this...
There were conditions I was born into of horrible physical excruciation, terror set upon my innocence by others older and capable of it and pain streaming between the two and weaving amongst my family members and in any voids would be filled in with witness of space or the occupying of that time with freedom to choose, and what I would choose would be pleasure, antidote to pain, with imagination and enjoyment of whatever my senses could contact and I could control. These times seemed few and far between though also incredibly important.
I wanted instinctually to be loved and accepted. Anywhere. By my self, by my mom and dad, grandparents, sister, friends, other parents, teachers - anybody. I had trouble finding any feeling of security in this though, due to circumstances beyond our control or reckoning and filled the void however I could manage, successfully or not.

It is important to see this for my own personal understanding of my self and the form of my life, to chart my course and location, realizing the relatively, the recognition of what had occurred prior to the overwhelming destraction of obedience to law and the dollar and debt, paying with constant time and attention all the while being unpresent and gradually increasingly ignorant of what being truly present is. Who I am. Not an expectation or role or rectangle on an org chart. Just this experience I call me and an understanding of what's really included there (with the benefit of some perspective) which feels enormously helpful and full of meaning. I had to write it down lest the next wave of distraction pulls me way away again. It's perhaps an opportunity of the disconnection from the juggernaut of modern money making society that created the quiet space sufficient for this lucidity. In any case I prize the fortune and hope earnestly to allow greater such space to distinguish other myriad connections and flowers of feelings and unfolding understandings or clarifying the misunderstandings. Thank you.",11.48949859118852,10.787373941406253,10.441106557377054,57.57913934426232,55.6796875,13.924692622950818,45.905481557377044,12.8603056689031,6.298552766393444,6095,319,878,177,61,1936,570,1280,0.136,0.713,0.151,0.9437,8,1,1,0,4,0,120.0,4,3,7,15,38,82,8,8,77,1,77,27,9,11,7,217,126,103,0,22,24,14,8,4,3,13,15,5,3,10,57,93,0,8,39,8,5,19,12,37,1,4,46,19,108,45,191,51,27,167,0,2,5,3,86,74,0,26,67,661,165,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457679578844883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237049282591477,0.0,0.030887266688898775,0.0,0.0,0.05646319557354459,0.04136963143103745,0.0,0.03594289439733552,0.0,0.0,0.07586851668364973,0.124185550349136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097907712801193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04122805952806595,0.0,0.04116567267078222,0.04147692118432944,0.042712090927556616,0.0,0.0423331076330469,0.0872634818653783,0.09056946389269917,0.12894670518684395,0.044674895930238274,0.0,0.02603895823043584,0.041625528934651664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03372868009220534,0.04541717911746032,0.07152169501084157,0.0,0.045029529790302884,0.026667740308604925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369708370705321,0.038062575581444505,0.0,0.061245435196627986,0.0,0.0,0.1326886743593905,0.11070785564919963,0.034343512770115034,0.0,0.0885396466428362,0.09358239610493904,0.03732664380473096,0.0,0.07746401751738062,0.0,0.03386518503959948,0.0,0.044514303800194326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04298063709790867,0.03616865761275799,0.07972520353843897,0.04143707191858697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118885435484584,0.0,0.0,0.08020427419042171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022189404882984046,0.0,0.045545499141478485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057037040433955924,0.07890202519831163,0.16186805940640786,0.0,0.03573118543089045,0.06781076513697089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10932181901357588,0.0,0.10780425687165064,0.0,0.0,0.04398092642850781,0.0,0.04067422616216368,0.04068916526914549,0.0,0.0,0.0945749617590213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031140195352331205,0.0,0.0858799374219801,0.0,0.039559570780076034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02735958975638296,0.0,0.4725879970111694,0.0,0.044832388376591904,0.0437229013813794,0.0,0.0,0.07050893174130267,0.12655190248193576,0.0,0.038168045932585236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051731358828893376,0.04151289941044838,0.0,0.04334834488450071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032108342587606684,0.0,0.04086231990421164,0.06434834151040847,0.1102694437485438,0.1263618459148113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04538392954946899,0.0,0.041157897148022114,0.0,0.031083152929103876,0.0399325566547701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03224405141478855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038053578399640485,0.0,0.0,0.03245242327040236,0.0,0.07434495967983185,0.0,0.0,0.026823792087683054,0.0,0.27768214240499023,0.09616128370517336,0.18834695985519775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044858839954692864,0.0,0.04391712008112439,0.03944114956188615,0.25219489387507465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03331414507113364,0.02381460828502899,0.22433821743368948,0.0,0.0,0.03630256409073772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784138406283668,0.043785677134895215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154987871675362,0.0,0.0,0.02600059900078784
mentalhealth,danielchancs,2020/04/10,"Make your brain focus better Hi, I have a link to an informative youtube video showing you more than 3 tips as to how to improve your concentration in a world full of distractions, like your mobile phone and computer games and etc.

Here is the link:

 [https://youtu.be/zDMZsrHaVOE](https://youtu.be/zDMZsrHaVOE) 

​

Enjoy!",16.6924,15.002094240000005,11.86,54.56,46.6,14.0,43.0,12.161744961471696,5.0894,272,9,38,5,2,75,43,50,0.037000000000000005,0.748,0.215,0.8687,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,4,0,1,2,4,0,1,4,0,2,1,1,2,0,7,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,3,7,3,3,3,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,0,1,25,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3810935125551231,0.4273839493098289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110718713277851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3926410329920492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3922659602274974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17183489824590126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347789358188931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4273839493098289,0.0
mentalhealth,azrael-o,2020/04/10,"Not able to talk to talk to psychologist during Corona Hello,
I‘m trying to describe this as quickly as possible and sorry for my English, I‘m Austrian.
I go to a psychologist for about 4 months or something. I have general anxiety disorder and misophonia if you wanna count that. Anyways, I have a really big fear of schizophrenia or getting it. I couldnt sleep the whole last 2 nights because of that. I don‘t trust my own instincts. Every time I hear or see or smell something I am like „is this real?“. I take pictures and aufios to make sure that what I just heard is real. I slept the whole day afterwards, so I did get sleep. But this time I didn‘t sleep at all and I am not tired. I texted my psychologist and she said she can tell me when she has time on tuesday. I don‘t have any medication. It‘s hell to go through that. My thoughts scare me all the time. I really don‘t know what to do. I don‘t talk about this to anyone of my family. Just to two friends and my psychologist. My stomach hurts since 2 days, I guess because I am nervous.
I really don‘t know how to get over these days. Was anyone in the same situation?",2.1930356088923872,4.612775153846158,3.5881605351170585,86.45140468227426,80.26696832579185,6.920401337792642,23.635844973440882,8.04050195162591,1.4351938225457408,883,31,176,17,23,289,124,221,0.10300000000000001,0.8340000000000001,0.062,-0.8373,0,0,2,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,0,0,9,9,1,3,6,0,19,7,5,2,3,31,37,17,0,3,10,0,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,0,13,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,9,5,0,1,7,5,33,4,26,29,6,21,1,1,1,0,13,5,1,6,15,125,46,0,0.11503063743890934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822477802709421,0.0,0.08799812278806535,0.0,0.0,0.16086419258564935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14024321781396673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22255573470268364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183507629205193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969182732729926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844064751284048,0.12944144753961812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08887238513946774,0.0,0.18029628104206616,0.0,0.13074912427722446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671921580769435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12964788856573134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314267649858428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12643566005073034,0.09376532244737236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05619815903072063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678384371801042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11588126538286547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181635734744156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794846084733226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296797600414971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26186009763387025,0.2210747156135328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942047795532307,0.0,0.11516573533329805,0.0,0.09166452497197597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09515453198327402,0.12929925607611176,0.34534113356870355,0.0,0.0,0.17711240917789453,0.0,0.12876738091586187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10841501445449606,0.0,0.08648872361459689,0.27737180727087696,0.10054184730218732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913214770796059,0.2683011589700401,0.13221079604566882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07809825201166795,0.0,0.11236821817246563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25685519743930524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,freddydoll47,2020/04/10,Confused Can any one explain how when I was a compulsive lier people ate up every word but now I’m brutally honest (a part of my therapy) about things I constantly get called a lier. Just posted a story from my school days and got banned from a sub reddit... I know people are insane but I’m supposed to be the diagnosed crazy one.,1.9101948051948057,4.3132891969696985,3.999264069264069,83.18318181818184,81.27272727272727,6.8017316017316025,21.549783549783545,7.957251820313856,1.361305627705628,261,8,48,5,7,89,51,66,0.243,0.696,0.061,-0.9239,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,1,1,6,0,4,2,0,1,0,10,11,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,5,1,6,7,1,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,4,32,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17757161319616302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666343051322447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28217963829653564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16840180240385672,0.0,0.0,0.26503288408259096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22000617409628148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642523628859846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2088427632721234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14350557896727756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35388545019589795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827692004338349,0.0,0.362057619107665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500822712174509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642689565909354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29861525772918,0.0,0.17347755985077012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LukeGreywolf,2020/04/10,"Does anyone else struggle with constantly losing things (keys, wallets, etc) and just instantly become enraged at themselves for losing it? It feels like a couple times a week I'll misplace something small, usually keys, it's gotten to the point I keep spare keys in my wallet for when I can't find my regular keys and some spare cash by where I hang my keys for when I lose my wallet. But that doesn't stop me from being absolutely livid at myself every time I misplace something and cannot find it.

Worst part is I almost never seem to find back what I'm looking for on the first search pass, I'll usually search the spot where I'll locate what is missing 2-3x before I actually find it. And usually waste over an hour looking. Then when I do find what I'm looking for I never feel relieved, I feel even more enraged at myself for not finding it sooner.

This happens at least once a week and basically ruins a whole day when it does because start calling myself ""worthless"" and a ""stupid piece of shit"" because I lost something *again* and it's hard to get out of that mindset; it's not even just when I lose things but when I forget things I find myself getting angry at myself because I forgot something *again* (I was on SSRIs for 7 years as a child and blame my completely shit memory on that)

Like seriously maybe I'm just really stupid but swear it's like the moment I tell myself I need to do something there's a 50/50 chance I instantly forget to do it. Like I'll tell myself I need to stop at the store on my way home from work as I'm clocking out, then I'll immediately drive right past the store 1 mile from my work, see the store as I drive past, drive all the way home, then remember ""oh right you stupid fuck you were supposed to stop at the store"".

I guess has anyone discovered any good ways to remember things? Because if I could just remember to do the things I tell myself to do and remember where I sit things down on the rare occasions they don't go to their usual places that would remove an incredible amount of stress and rage from my life",4.691986444212724,5.631390523114359,5.207635557872784,83.87055656934307,69.55961070559611,8.012547792839763,26.60071254779284,8.192908349453996,1.5676026416405977,1639,49,326,22,28,525,187,411,0.174,0.764,0.062,-0.9913,0,0,5,0,1,0,36.0,0,2,2,8,19,27,9,2,20,0,17,4,2,0,3,55,43,26,0,5,10,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,2,1,25,13,0,5,15,0,5,7,8,21,0,1,5,8,46,6,47,35,10,72,0,8,4,1,9,26,3,5,39,205,71,2,0.0,0.0,0.06325602424887299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490894897533897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04408055771273331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064881363713047,0.06641685741899407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04984340992248862,0.0,0.15805731668619805,0.07158979094359827,0.05515796541150254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06618957086678325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06796366988315944,0.07004856016906097,0.0,0.05175435843149902,0.071723292922086,0.0,0.041804234563049616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11345072915415645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054149695298812785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229263970389434,0.08562742497311909,0.0,0.0546145562336894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832645823300422,0.046308193032479184,0.0,0.0,0.4147170542439095,0.05513677816353054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059926044631097276,0.06773267859035012,0.0,0.0368393139869011,0.054368847109318455,0.0,0.0,0.07140772842830748,0.0,0.057321067623424427,0.0,0.05806695618517675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300416583400649,0.0,0.06383570731646243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057615954910413825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04578504631372361,0.12667322324110744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633001466455951,0.29007283503073306,0.07075986684459393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512148814869488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09612802004747112,0.09998802711902903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690323354568205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0701949136731526,0.12375811244888894,0.0,0.0,0.0677242329094832,0.0,0.06127687332414215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04152604416064132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937185934554091,0.11071369755108576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05165400893611926,0.05901067739611043,0.0,0.0,0.13307581575118152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495121741254185,0.0,0.0,0.0458806945800028,0.0,0.0,0.16257997798335558,0.0742523289800332,0.06776506775491359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16996944501448732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583854744987333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559538691356651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28556505032695545,0.0,0.0,0.15435587015523475,0.1039911220445313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237042175189788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438103758804726,0.0,0.0,0.046047035949991794,0.0,0.0,0.0417426507539098
mentalhealth,0necellintheseaa,2020/04/10,"How to stop worrying all the time Lately I’ve been so anxious. I look at any little interaction and think about it over and over again to the point where I’m looking at the situation completely wrong. For instance, I always think people don’t like me and are saying things negatively directed at me.

For some reason it’s gotten a lot worse– probably the pandemic and my new job (which I hate) has something to do with it.

I’m in the mental health field so I feel like I should know how to deal with this shit. I’m just so frustrated at myself:(",4.00644495412844,5.277338577981652,5.204483944954131,82.01663417431195,71.4770642201835,8.752752293577982,25.551605504587158,9.188382445141503,1.9376871559633029,431,13,87,9,8,143,74,109,0.17,0.7859999999999999,0.044000000000000004,-0.9352,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,9,6,3,0,6,0,6,2,1,3,1,19,17,9,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,6,6,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,4,9,2,16,14,3,15,0,0,2,0,3,10,1,2,7,59,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520184735691883,0.0,0.0,0.12424017102168187,0.0,0.0,0.20639551778222584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915542454016125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883525030488364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237705253515814,0.1305187166540394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803753853328494,0.0,0.1941982834129984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18129850319935267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10040544968054214,0.0,0.2060900842695296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17851297415409914,0.18311031074655226,0.0,0.0,0.3068387999887436,0.0,0.0,0.155322388677082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841155252932156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644982447050886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12665904112710746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17270764292680935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19697818084643848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878428626107728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14528792425964354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875357636752486,0.0,0.20535899356989326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14064901532032578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527428063334039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213757160637737,0.234129619614948,0.0,0.0,0.10653204367102083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18553759129239514,0.0,0.0,0.1997504025444812,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,STUPlDbean,2020/04/10,"Why do I punish myself to become perfect? Help I'm a younge teenage girl, throughout my whole life I have had general and social anxiety I have also always been really insecure and have had a desire to be perfect and loved. I have had depression since 12. But when I started a new school last year this all become alot worse. I didnt fit in with the other girls and because of my social anxiety I didnt even know how to talk to them. I spent months without freinds, and I started wondering WHY dont I fit in. I began comparing myself to other girls, finding things wronge with me. Things they didnt do, and I did. I tell myself everday that no one could love me unconditionally, that I must be perfect to be loved.I started trying to change myself to be like them, and to be perfect. But it wasnt working. So I decided I would punish myself, I have long nails and would pinch myself every time I did something wrong. But soon my skin got used to this, so pinching didnt hurt, so I cut every couple days so that when I pinch it does hurt. Ik its sick and that no one can be perfect, but I need to be or I'll go crazy.
 I punish myself for anything and everything, eating to much, saying something stupid, being weird, laughing to loud, slouching, not doing excersise, doing something dumb, not studying. I've done this on and off for a year, I have also become obsessed with my weight. I tell myself I am fat, I weigh myself 5 times a day. Whenever I get more than 50.5kg I will diet untill I go back to 47. Dieting means I only eat half my dinner, no lunch, no breakfast. I've gone weeks only eating 800 calories a day.
I'm tired of living like this, and hating myself. I look at the girl I was a couple years ago and I have become a shadow of her. I've looked up what my obsession with needing to he perfect and punishing myself, but nothing ever matches. Maybe it's a combination of GAD SAD and depression. One sight said it was Abandonment Personality Disorder.
I just wanted to know whether anyone else does what I do to themselves, and whether anyone knows what it is.",3.584563106796118,5.092314725728159,4.89726941747573,82.88337985436894,72.85922330097088,7.188834951456312,25.98179611650485,7.756953410329674,1.4955640776699024,1625,54,311,21,32,540,206,412,0.201,0.7090000000000001,0.09,-0.9933,0,0,3,0,0,0,52.0,0,0,3,7,14,31,8,3,12,0,43,17,2,2,9,60,70,34,0,8,12,0,2,2,0,4,4,3,0,5,21,20,11,1,7,0,1,3,13,20,0,4,19,8,58,11,36,38,5,36,0,6,3,2,20,8,1,3,27,222,79,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235842373689431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305559931617592,0.06792115419007831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248906121583263,0.0,0.0,0.114152591270398,0.08363767901877125,0.06717300663902454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276700347321673,0.0,0.049759758415594456,0.3606074836205218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08635175194090354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517343015808279,0.18063997559364176,0.0,0.15793019820039791,0.0,0.14061240015820098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09355292397377743,0.0,0.14286667629545616,0.08353393112235391,0.09566757583016616,0.0,0.0,0.2505779067739897,0.06818983930232098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05391461869330735,0.07383732877320451,0.13755046238365454,0.0,0.07336211164483877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746066440151831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0426473357154144,0.0,0.09278230974014763,0.0,0.06528548294510389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08059089182809948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054713623702062224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17476923101828648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458207813484754,0.06653783142555514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05765637153364715,0.07975877508684273,0.0,0.07207914589312568,0.0722383379946411,0.1370941633356734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473451723260272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200644135637201,0.08891697799405518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515480507968753,0.0,0.060006077465421324,0.12105246766976842,0.0,0.07883696930570144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832440486993324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16594002704211924,0.12416376233214547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07127454604914807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05229307870615661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07764705678670641,0.06491397574193103,0.0,0.08261203878037779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752364353073377,0.0,0.0,0.16641922452184382,0.0,0.18852399774768128,0.0,0.0,0.17333045956536638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06560960944009912,0.14269319002793704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846022239457166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951960534068951,0.09381954255916587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05542015098278488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07050050708532164,0.0,0.0,0.048146393738637085,0.0,0.06547717269648339,0.09940108759968326,0.0,0.0,0.14731340548410612,0.09113490671130901,0.0,0.07868661708380567,0.08852223921628688,0.059426260395378086,0.0,0.08318605155117767,0.11597258172741665,0.1784951206549121,0.0,0.15769754370295175
mentalhealth,SplitKonekoInHalf,2020/04/10,"After years of BPD and a suicide attempt today I cried tears of joy because I realized I've started genuinely enjoying my life I've always posted somewhere online when I've felt shit so I thought I'd add this post today and maybe show somebody that if you sticking through it you'll eventually feel what you thought you never would. 

I've struggled with mental health issues for about 8 years, initially diagnosed with depression and anxiety; and later on borderline personality disorder. Had a bad alcohol problem, stopped eating, lost contact any people I knew and attempted suicide 3-4 years ago (bad idea) and can vividly remember how empty that feels.

Of course I still have ""those"" days or weeks, but I'm becoming better and better at noticing when I have those crop ups, it's not a pit of darkness but more like a flashing light now. Slowly through developing healthier coping mechanisms like going for walks or cooking, which may sound retarded, but really helps ground my thoughts and and realize it's just my mind playing up; it took me years to push myself to go for a walk so I know how hard it might be but once that first one's done you've made a huge step.

Now after a really long time of procrastinating I started planning my first video, which is a hobby I really wanted to do but could never motivate myself to do so (we'll see if I can stay strong enough to actually finish it) and I streamed yesterday to about 5 people and had the most fun I've had in so fucking long. 

We might have to put in a fuck ton of effort to control our thoughts but once you learn how to do it well there's no doubt that you will have an incredible strength of character, it's a long journey and I'm still working on walking that road but one day it'll be worth it for all of us.",8.71524855907781,6.930468743515849,8.646799351585017,71.69711545389052,61.85302593659943,12.017939481268012,38.6903818443804,10.820120047756994,4.057461239193083,1422,59,267,29,16,464,201,347,0.125,0.737,0.139,0.9025,0,0,1,0,0,2,25.0,4,6,0,14,19,21,3,2,12,0,25,9,1,6,3,63,47,32,2,6,13,0,4,2,0,8,4,1,0,1,21,16,3,2,15,4,1,10,4,10,1,4,13,8,28,11,36,23,5,55,0,2,2,2,13,10,3,9,34,171,49,4,0.0,0.0,0.08875366297682286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062130830215107,0.09719743330743956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756773300107722,0.0,0.0,0.06184882798947053,0.0,0.06957617390528417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1518781878866072,0.05544201513912612,0.10044665711191184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16087501160407655,0.0,0.0,0.1145478025299296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1020076789859106,0.07261583288476739,0.0,0.0999038345599223,0.11730990018643354,0.0,0.0783347333924823,0.09231190145842323,0.0,0.0,0.10423608941071903,0.0,0.0,0.09307298952771527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09306411809628223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397522058729177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09197367301473204,0.0,0.08732585225036085,0.0,0.0,0.15472331955295224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16816282818524475,0.0,0.0,0.10337747579667182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147295250603641,0.0,0.0,0.0966751424107818,0.0,0.0,0.06096158120927533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267099675940823,0.0,0.0949277240892102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04998350642493523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642403726468606,0.08886673401647907,0.0,0.0,0.24146252853203426,0.0,0.0,0.09928220195283363,0.0,0.0,0.08605868442309005,0.0,0.0,0.09137106987563172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09165577735774227,0.19296624723617875,0.09183314126148424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402918341140897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035466909264028,0.0,0.19371665255256015,0.1232595680310876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261059636921239,0.07941365848457972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17420909904847845,0.0,0.0,0.08702645772773135,0.0,0.09142944064885576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747938748265492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10302813590925404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247503387947757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09335842903339417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12874915084372102,0.09694014289590253,0.14526489192082262,0.07603791493409214,0.0,0.09508024028602023,0.0,0.1989681408686892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888152051097985,0.05303342703243594,0.0,0.17241912026058026,0.0,0.10104832134592152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109401137207576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536444141922379,0.0,0.07295426094287316,0.0,0.0817745881442041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621237187256232,0.0,0.0,0.06460796672437141,0.0,0.0,0.2342741707696078
mentalhealth,TheBrn,2020/04/10,"What should I say in a job interview when being asked why I was sick for a couple of months? Last year I had a drug induced psychosis which meant I had to quit my job and go to therapy for a couple of months. Now, I have pretty much recovered and want to start working again. In an interview I will probably be asked why I didn't work for such a rather long time. I don't think it's a good idea to tell them about the psychosis, so what should I say instead?
I was thinking about saying that I had a depressive episode which isn't a lie since I have depression and that was probably a big cause for the psychosis. However, I don't know if saying that I have depression will look so good either.
So, what do you think is the best approach to this? Thanks for any ideas!",5.323284106891703,4.9540354493670895,5.67059071729958,85.67560478199721,67.92405063291139,9.553867791842476,29.58087201125176,9.150863307647796,2.0920610407876232,603,19,133,10,9,193,87,158,0.125,0.795,0.08,-0.7826,3,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,1,4,11,7,0,0,13,0,21,2,0,2,0,18,33,8,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,4,2,4,0,0,10,3,0,0,8,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,8,5,17,4,16,19,3,15,0,3,1,0,11,3,0,1,10,93,27,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248775710818282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267971448961913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729624532440167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12460790567851796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684309760376317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134250076159927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14066880349563765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06893724902454629,0.2034803771690892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27386453448032744,0.0,0.0,0.2407418916603945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666298249171804,0.09887520729723706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10734615918493504,0.10186095284922256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936400607186284,0.0,0.08916902191388328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12340510606117915,0.2615625558731265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12901685165722782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3858486320013214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10034012393439434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08585634544675362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10602102925237168,0.11167619797871793,0.13871644462198454,0.0,0.0,0.2331712887523956,0.0,0.0,0.0707306603839101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154553371412976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189076979642699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766148276733855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811284192181582
mentalhealth,arpanghosh8453,2020/04/10,"Can Anybody help me to get out of a subreddit addiction, please? First of all, forgive me if I am in the wrong place to post this.

Hi, To introduce myself, I am a 19 y/o college student.

I was being bored by the lockdown in my home and I had some skills in Creative Softwares. So I joined r/slavelabour and I was surprised with a lot more personal income ( It's a really great subreddit for freelancers). I was working there for about 2 months and earned a lot ( at least for me it is a lot ).

There is nothing wrong with it even now. but the problem is I got addicted to it. I keep checking for new tasks there more than ever. I cannot stop myself from it. I tried it many times before...but failed. I cannot concentrate on other things or I cannot learn anything new due to this. I am unable to keep myself busy with other things...I tried that too. 

Is there any way I can overcome this? can anybody give me good advice for this?",0.93809523809524,3.2178218571428587,2.467089947089949,93.40476190476193,84.39682539682539,5.293121693121694,21.698412698412696,6.655083550727371,0.4486888888888889,717,24,153,8,21,233,109,189,0.076,0.823,0.1,0.3001,1,1,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,0,5,10,9,0,0,9,0,18,2,0,0,2,22,23,7,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,14,7,0,3,2,0,1,0,3,5,0,1,5,0,23,4,26,17,8,18,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,6,9,114,37,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265337961537815,0.0,0.14634946901624288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184592323843376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12324454522741247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891894072381376,0.1354717982829401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12739076744565273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824648260352694,0.14366906360187034,0.0,0.1256165011646002,0.11978144284592596,0.16511739382554422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10038490173799904,0.0,0.1502273727956384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662375625714928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3819767457899493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183907945607658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954168382812473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892896094826267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437043857553736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076977574224427,0.15647345188394954,0.16439794487251666,0.0,0.0,0.14343429864304474,0.0,0.0,0.1433057055658397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959438474790169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252109684100483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949778529428883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732967970769122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20336238158914854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11887717184886848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903133272494116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.327490923380026,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lollo67,2020/04/10,"Who can help me what my body/brain needs for medication? Lowering glutamate? My real problems started 15 years ago, together with heavy weightlifting at that time, developed a severe posture of upper/lower crossed syndrome, from my body constantly being in fight/flight mode. This affected the anxiety/depressions was shooting it through the roof. I continued a few years but at last I had to go to psychiatric emergency. They’ve tried so many meds during the years. 

All meds that has lifted my mood has at the same time triggered muscle tensions as if my brain see it as a threat and the fight/flight mode is on. SSRI has this effect almost immediately, at the same time it makes me more creative but make the system go overdrive (is it making perhaps light bipolar or any adhd symptoms worse?! 

Lamictal was the only medicine that has really worked to lower the tensions and also raising my mood and stable the anxiety. After some research I think it’s worked better than others because of the glutamate antagonism. After that I’ve tried Valproate/Depakote, Cymbalta, Amitriptyline with not the same success. Also I’m really sensitive to norepinephrine in the last two ones. Lyrica helps relaxing the nerves a little for a few hours but makes me feel really slow and dumb.

Are there any other medications that work on minimizing glutamate and have uplifting effect same as Lamictal?

How about newer atypical antipsychotics? Is it worth trying (don’t like the idea of playing with dopamine receptors. Rexulti, Vraylar? I tried Abilify for a few days and it really made me creative but same there, it triggered and activated the tensions. I don’t know if it would continue because I dropped it after a few days. 

I know there’s Gabapentin, Topimax, maybe Trileptal?",7.647339477726575,9.28014550967742,7.410368663594473,68.22650537634412,63.25806451612904,10.807987711213519,36.6973886328725,10.813802987103665,4.552803379416282,1428,68,214,38,21,453,177,310,0.136,0.767,0.09699999999999999,-0.9064,3,0,0,1,2,0,39.0,0,0,0,7,8,13,2,3,23,0,17,6,2,11,1,46,32,21,0,5,8,0,2,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,21,10,0,0,7,3,1,3,3,6,0,2,4,4,17,5,31,26,12,35,0,0,1,0,3,9,1,5,22,145,38,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12978751325411025,0.0,0.09572995234479537,0.0,0.10814015105887732,0.0,0.0,0.17272514184592525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468789202433591,0.0,0.08261493087316144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13166398757203884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955117047754219,0.0,0.11995672200402505,0.0,0.2411135038714998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670288916582405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392940823080187,0.0,0.09301486731646724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054604889948437915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227506851470504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447718819485243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063520999974176,0.0,0.0,0.12191181009039205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11870109252387695,0.17605865640897422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05276029620204118,0.10823811858398816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1021863069723762,0.28834669376830796,0.10948872243537193,0.10849424735338624,0.0,0.2399134440080501,0.21758470353184184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007600471911684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317936673412459,0.08213412092990506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333544352553983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292054181975985,0.2767342721950713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605704478855128,0.0,0.0,0.1220022096944469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764385392290479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122468668006054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06919804086560412,0.0,0.0,0.18891608990525954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.293282696804698,0.0,0.10549421149603896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23586223062422595,0.0,0.11005486769172848,0.07671566867208947,0.0,0.0,0.20863332234084406
mentalhealth,Antique-Butterscotch,2020/04/10,"I want to take my brain shake and dump its contents out on the ground like an abusive mother shakes her child’s shoulders violently asking why don’t you work but in a cute way Oof that went too far, but yeah muh brain why don’t you work :( sad",0.551764705882352,2.8542491764705886,1.3759803921568654,100.3369117647059,86.64705882352942,4.184313725490196,16.34313725490196,5.46131890053228,-0.9424274509803924,192,4,45,1,6,59,44,51,0.257,0.589,0.154,-0.7543,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,2,0,2,1,7,2,2,3,1,2,3,3,0,0,5,6,3,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,1,0,5,2,4,5,0,9,0,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,1,20,7,2,0.0,0.3030998156812467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391531804319829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5711499290995957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497864678342227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923415966965908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508867489603493,0.20305462387380152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371437500393258,0.4616678240209912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724738048961748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,needanswers4,2020/04/10,"Hyper efficient leading into a crash - why does this happen? I woke up yesterday morning full of energy, and immediately went out to get my errands done, i.e. shopping, laundry, filling up the gas. Then when I got home I ran a 5k, which is something I've been trying to do lately. Throughout this entire period I was anxious and high energy, yet hyper efficient in completing my tasks. I did not eat until after I had finished. Once I had eaten, it was like my body shut down, and most of my mind did as well - I felt exhausted. Yet there was still a whirring tension that kept me from taking a nap or peacefully doing low stimulation activities like reading or video games. I was forced to just kind of lay like a potato and watch youtube for much of the time. In addition, I had difficulty thinking, and could not feel emotion. This started around 1 pm yesterday, and although i was eventually ablebto talk on the phone some with my beother around 7, it took until this morning (8 am) to feel 'normal' again. 



I must say, this has happened many many times before, and even during my high energy phase I understood what was happening and knew that there would be a downfall. I oftentimes try and overeat or overcaffeinate in order to eegain energy/feeling, but that oftentimes does more harm than good. 



Anyway anyone else experience this? I mean I understand it's like the bodies way of shutting down and preventing too much stress, but it's frustrating as hell and it has fucked with my attempts at going to college in the past. Any advice or insight would be appreciated.",6.8947969348659015,7.666378786206899,7.091264367816094,72.91739463601533,64.58620689655173,10.306513409961687,34.042145593869726,10.25414643259724,3.5996743295019162,1248,52,214,28,18,403,185,290,0.126,0.77,0.10300000000000001,-0.9012,0,0,1,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,2,14,15,3,2,11,0,25,7,2,2,1,48,48,24,0,5,9,0,3,4,0,3,1,1,1,0,16,18,3,2,9,5,1,6,2,8,1,0,23,5,24,7,35,19,6,46,1,1,1,1,4,20,2,6,22,150,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176119300558776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777756281617911,0.0,0.0,0.12920572237854788,0.0,0.0799702724803818,0.11718574070586718,0.0,0.2036273738665455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732057919872332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540789213492118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11991493283254025,0.0,0.0,0.09131526337194186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20017218890197688,0.1170403783018529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702922237255198,0.0955415898791632,0.12865103196586933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755404095447415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187595871338288,0.0,0.0,0.17348696229827773,0.0,0.10981328562429432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573336650613163,0.059753686180375326,0.0,0.06499919545149119,0.0959282607973478,0.09147226185634837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3034114543447709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416766988460721,0.11472259187952573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11909891796833495,0.0,0.0,0.1290145178501231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22350192511312086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23190677463951626,0.0,0.12458262890367958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548125453401299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16815044886792815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205847003005644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12180048375564845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091792553823507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11440110642681993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909517387226109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804773389249984,0.0,0.0,0.08095178524540804,0.0,0.09133615450983257,0.0,0.13101062755451134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599212394961246,0.09192639931979817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328377805297742,0.0,0.0,0.1333803156859312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12706945180451187,0.15529965726311115,0.0,0.0,0.1190633661242292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907817065293572,0.0,0.0,0.10283250576179068,0.10602228065843584,0.10320127686520507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16249055510314778,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_yeetorbeyeeted_,2020/04/10,How are you? Have a great day. Just because you’re in quarantine doesn’t mean you can’t have a cold lemonade and relax for the day :) My duck Waddles says hi also 😁,-0.7048571428571435,1.4758968000000008,1.3000000000000007,98.21000000000002,95.28571428571428,3.9428571428571435,18.42857142857143,5.6839178017228535,-0.3788857142857141,128,4,29,1,5,42,29,35,0.0,0.73,0.27,0.875,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,3,0,5,0,0,1,0,4,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,2,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,17,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33468516030828344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551219950751786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5398132752305425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4614127016207452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558839822419604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33281879829933125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_jakemybreathaway_,2020/04/10,"My friend randomly loses his cognitive ability My friend randomly loses the ability to think clearly. Most common after a few drinks. For ex, we will be playing video games and out of no where hes speaking slower, repeating himself, and plays like a little kid. It's almost like in the evening he shuts down his cognitive ability. He also has these random night terrors where hes punching everything and you can't wake him up. 

I'm convinced he has an undiagnosed anxiety disorder or hes been diagnosed and skips his medication but in 15 years I've known I haven't seen him take any meds. Jw if anyone in here has any thoughts of what it could be.",3.8454181818181823,6.05569552,5.0786181818181815,78.89130909090909,73.8,9.025454545454542,29.763636363636362,9.573946990214177,3.1196400000000004,520,23,94,14,11,172,90,125,0.081,0.7440000000000001,0.17600000000000002,0.85,1,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,1,1,0,2,5,10,0,1,5,0,13,4,1,0,1,19,18,8,0,2,3,1,0,2,2,1,2,1,0,1,4,6,1,0,3,5,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,2,14,7,11,11,2,15,0,2,1,0,20,10,0,7,7,59,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20332628407909728,0.0,0.0,0.1623798418750404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27616333776316393,0.0,0.15533348843526015,0.0,0.0,0.1419780070697107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621197315761873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060925295654958,0.0,0.0,0.23271408127527066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19891271508226074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411329570026426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18248918031282305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3137534568214168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19840096150472147,0.20351048368161465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4543243465665739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255439288420105,0.2045525589172444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1905496442806773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15266911070051198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301069064264249,0.0,0.16119984329665382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13075821130039614
mentalhealth,HelpThisRabbit,2020/04/10,"Lockdown and parents My parents arent bad. They dont beat me up or physically do anything. Its just that they keep fighting and even more with the lockdown. 

Ever since young i have been criticized and those event made me have a mindset that i can never change even if i want to. 

Once when i was about 6 i tried to help bring the water jug to the dining table but i was too weak and spilt it. My father then scolded me for “not helping but instead making trouble” From then on i had also maintained this thinking

Anyways enough of self pity. How should I continue lockdown with my self degrading mindset and my family quarrels?",3.493884297520662,5.757754421487608,4.010743801652893,85.89975206611572,75.03305785123969,6.052892561983472,28.355371900826448,6.980632752743323,1.5555223140495875,499,21,91,5,11,157,86,121,0.17,0.7909999999999999,0.039,-0.9539,3,3,0,0,2,0,7.0,0,0,2,1,11,6,1,0,4,0,11,3,0,3,2,22,17,14,0,3,6,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,6,7,2,1,1,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,5,0,17,0,11,11,2,11,0,1,0,0,10,2,0,2,8,74,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1572220180797571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16178614873983094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16415390425870555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20797814602122866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23041530262315915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20314173585603265,0.0,0.2597066576471873,0.17783716485475054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18533824334772667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26355546387630097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747483015124186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18602893858550973,0.1312329190075828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15163107109650506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093740074129104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4366050368305236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4101961430664776,0.0,0.0,0.16263065749645975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597419826420528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347940249671286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596056226192945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Crosscountrykidd,2020/04/10,"Is this irrational? - anxiety I was poisoned on a date I have general anxiety/panic attacks and OCD but don't have a fear of being poisoned in general.  I recently went on a tinder date and my date started talking about how she thinks people are poisoning her in public (bartenders putting windex in her drink was an example she used.)  She was pretty hung up on the topic and seemed to be paranoid about it.  We got off the topic and went to a bar and I left my drink on our table when I went to the restroom and when I came back she put a coaster on the top of my drink, saying she thought that was the polite thing to do...I have no idea why she did that.  Since the date I started feeling anxious that maybe she poisoned me when I left my drink alone with her and her obsession with being poisoned may be related to her doing that.  Is my anxiety about this completely irrational?  I didn't get sick or have symptoms, is it possible to have been poisoned or had a harmful substance in your drink without symptoms?  I have anxiety/ocd already but now I am sitting here worrying about something I never worried about before.  I am going through a stressful change in my life btw, if that is relevant.  Anyway, just wanted to type this out because I don't want to discuss this with people I know.",5.490595238095239,6.0967027023809575,6.0985317460317505,79.39160714285715,67.6111111111111,8.998412698412697,34.400793650793645,9.017664075816787,3.0302650793650794,1019,47,189,17,16,332,128,252,0.21,0.726,0.064,-0.9898,0,1,6,0,0,0,23.0,2,1,0,1,14,11,7,3,14,0,29,16,0,2,1,34,46,16,0,3,7,0,1,0,0,1,10,1,0,0,12,13,6,0,6,6,0,7,6,11,0,0,14,2,37,0,33,27,0,37,0,0,0,0,19,16,0,5,13,148,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230065957000238,0.11965507379388116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16589712966968725,0.12249490611292885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335464703238515,0.0,0.08337588818103757,0.0,0.06609785116385815,0.0,0.0922658454466624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240149017842666,0.0,0.0,0.11470444048095475,0.0,0.11368667090319992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5311000354682806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201376533241473,0.05482540754214851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056650139357773174,0.0,0.06162320211266644,0.0,0.08672128387009423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240414143711616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059590228818930176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356187734790963,0.0,0.076587234054673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893239291837874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08362781139455477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15034325859332912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223840285179308,0.0,0.11031217375435634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21800396485726026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706142983660616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622779618841113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09871049448094683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.089694320918108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08347462247081262,0.0,0.0,0.15349446062857394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242060663154517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254003340537269,0.0,0.08715183388694768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203599721244454,0.06947749176232014,0.0,0.08608121653452731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364860627702963,0.0,0.0,0.127909510365131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015467676520641,0.09784110554562073,0.0,0.0,0.10452253930081208,0.0,0.0,0.22023162198474952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crizmikk,2020/04/10,"What is wrong with me? I'm a 21 year old male from the UK. I've been going through some stuff, its pretty weird and I don't know whats wrong with me, do I have mental health issues?

Long story short, last august I tried weed for the first time but stupidly, I smoked a lot more then I should have for a newbie (2 joints). While high I felt extremely anxious and had this constant reoccurring thought that I couldn't understand human language (even though I can duhh) and a general question of how am I able to do anything (for example I can move my hands, I can talk but how am I actually doing this? I have no idea).

Anyway after getting high this constant reoccurring thought is literally always in my head even to this day. For example I could be listening to a lecture then suddenly bam, how am I able to understand what the lecturer is saying, maybe I can't? Obviously this is completely irrational but the feeling of discomfort and I guess stress is still there. I might be talking/listening to a friend and bam the same thing.

This is so weird I don't whats wrong with me. I never had issues with anxiety or depression ever before in my life and I used to be super happy but now I am literally sad all the time. I even split up with my girlfriend because I just wasn't happy with life. I'm not a stupid person, I came third in my first year of university and I know these thoughts are irrational but still they keep coming to me.

Guys any advice or help is much appreciated, what is wrong with me? Am I anxious or have I just slipped into a spiral of negative thoughts?",3.534568690095845,5.186329523961664,4.787368690095847,83.039021086262,73.24920127795527,8.202888178913739,26.89699680511182,8.841846274778883,2.0271938402555905,1243,45,249,25,25,411,162,313,0.18,0.715,0.105,-0.9718,0,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,3,16,16,2,2,14,0,38,5,2,4,4,58,58,23,0,3,11,0,3,0,2,2,3,2,0,4,16,17,0,1,12,0,0,4,9,12,0,3,10,5,39,4,30,41,6,35,0,2,0,0,12,8,0,8,23,184,55,2,0.1865260277198642,0.0,0.09101124817580583,0.0,0.0,0.09113553775836596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760229867573294,0.0,0.0,0.06342204754977121,0.0,0.07134595033075355,0.21072131880049585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767475138829434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05685226761301632,0.0,0.0793599556492552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666804230537892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033782836872179,0.09778449562904623,0.201568371379833,0.0,0.07446292768664932,0.0,0.0,0.060146928483022624,0.0,0.08032729717792661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847980232101589,0.08436173544461817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715658204760576,0.0,0.0895471188991579,0.0,0.0,0.15865894389165108,0.0,0.0,0.07205477315927487,0.0,0.048726075452871,0.0,0.053003520023597234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273972433186908,0.0923450465114843,0.0,0.19856042494518736,0.0,0.0,0.09571475860044032,0.09913422255796564,0.0,0.0,0.06251223229035352,0.19707498927559086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528259063480017,0.0,0.1946847119561397,0.0,0.08289645189534871,0.0,0.0,0.10250982675779158,0.07602180394448839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13174884960852734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825348324501466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928887926677762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369523282336643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398718227584862,0.09893731947351818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912382417157478,0.06855904616696007,0.0,0.07193018577120966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09786384451842654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814336663803518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09488201375426003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044759197665404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416649192469804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895992668257607,0.0,0.10683246727372032,0.0,0.10676383788904914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496127780043675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061959802310967364,0.0,0.09163043759519814,0.2961616617001861,0.10876482676603323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06331946446588098,0.0,0.0,0.1941801730500555,0.0,0.0805492997412129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4078738599305745,0.0,0.12011664635555275
mentalhealth,che1ron,2020/04/10,"Just lost because of the Corona It's my first post and I just need to vent out what I feel, I am on meds to treat my schizophrenia and I don't hide it from people but right now I feel lost in my thoughts and I want to end but don't have the power for it, I am 23 year old and live with my mother and caring for me is taking it toll on her I don't know what to do. I am alone in this world no one really love me I here to suffer and that it.
Thanks for reading and sorry for grammar English is my second language",-0.8894960212201609,0.9559749310344864,1.4193103448275863,100.77980106100796,88.48275862068968,3.914058355437666,14.957559681697614,4.713530739802397,-1.2525442970822285,396,7,100,1,13,133,69,116,0.129,0.72,0.152,0.5925,1,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,4,4,7,0,0,2,0,10,1,0,0,0,19,22,9,0,2,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,9,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,3,0,3,3,2,18,4,17,19,0,13,0,3,0,1,3,7,0,0,5,73,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21777326885429416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12817685281024835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21438128903324455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862342113645272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126346944432697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1788530603269516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555728142081395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18566967300500734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4590626857430021,0.0,0.18977423792731893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335593108403637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591036637712632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206399167693264,0.0,0.1424824067932006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577270961470562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20137772762145276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21032396890334212,0.0,0.13470246773169936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17956692689219947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353767674142726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15809466681233553,0.0,0.0,0.193585665619394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669285646536469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12402096433103882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13540509768911474
mentalhealth,brownhorsejurassic,2020/04/10,"Working on mental health courses during the pandemic Hi, 

On this website, there are free courses available that are done at your own pace with journaling available to make sure you stay on track. (I keep my notes in my handwritten journal) I tend to do 30min - 1 hour each day. 

Here  [https://www.bigwhitewall.com/](https://www.bigwhitewall.com/)",10.344622641509435,13.362379264150945,6.943537735849057,68.88058962264154,58.24528301886792,8.318867924528304,34.00471698113208,8.841846274778883,3.0247396226415098,283,11,40,4,4,78,45,53,0.0,0.897,0.10300000000000001,0.6808,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,1,1,5,7,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,3,8,6,2,8,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,25,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22293710467298752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3537539930660979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3674451399013448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3404283779534464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072591641721004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307462599473065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34836741994006204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.368452359936412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3258023810240734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516615299363673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Heelpmeeplzz,2020/04/10,"Deprecating mental health b/c of isolation I just finished my first year of university and due to isolation I’ve just been over analyzing my entire college experience so far. I keep thinking about what my life would be like had I accepted another university. 

I haven’t made any friends this year, despite being in a small program where you’re forced to interact with one another, which makes me feel so defeated. I felt so much discomfort throughout the school year because I just didn’t have another person to talk to in class or to hangout with after class. normally I don’t have a hard time socializing with people and forming relationship, but this year I just felt so exhausted in every social situation I was put in. I feel like a lot of things are out of my control and it’s so overwhelming; Especially considering that everyone around me is building great friendships, or getting into new relationships, or just being young adults while Im stuck in a weird place in between high school and college. 

I feel so much regret and it gives me such heavy anxiety which is incredibly difficult to deal with when you’re alone. The worse part about it all is that if I want to transfer I would have to get better grades but it’s extremely difficult to do so when you feel entrapped by sadness. 

What should I do? I was planning on going to see a doctor or therapist to get anxiety medication because it’s definitely something I’m struggling with right now, but with everything closed, I can’t. I also wanted to see a therapist to help me more productive about my feelings but can’t do that either. I kind of feel like I’m slowly drowning. 

Any suggestions? Any advice or personal experiences you have that could help me be more relaxed? Btw I live in Canada.",6.6892603850050625,7.6351108541033454,7.269544072948327,70.84761904761906,65.0790273556231,11.008308004052687,35.42350557244174,10.914260884657429,4.165591286727457,1417,65,245,39,21,467,179,329,0.145,0.737,0.11900000000000001,-0.7264,0,4,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,0,5,22,19,0,3,8,0,28,5,0,3,1,55,52,26,1,9,16,0,9,3,1,3,5,0,0,3,16,15,0,2,10,2,0,2,5,10,0,2,9,11,31,9,42,35,9,36,0,4,2,0,17,19,0,7,18,170,47,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900786505995394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09547218652789616,0.0,0.07371747596596047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18805965056212487,0.2899808778961377,0.1410371209653851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206103822687924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123859182941903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815270055766485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033893397193647,0.07359939065141165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950350320527814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943516248798044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766685128204323,0.08808333025151449,0.08284674752984952,0.18034230173128984,0.0,0.0,0.2796582792322321,0.13170889921742568,0.1770173048607966,0.0,0.0,0.07840949822011678,0.0,0.0,0.0712191631836569,0.0,0.14448301618990708,0.08842885094936384,0.052388844990526436,0.0,0.0,0.10163037916227063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082576477068454,0.0,0.0,0.09798457567598244,0.0,0.0,0.12357457187798485,0.09739476793307406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995717894209346,0.0,0.0,0.08193511236002088,0.0,0.0959927997360986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06511048753694534,0.13510560740602506,0.0,0.08139791328369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836937628916871,0.0,0.0872243212283008,0.061531836768414463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286311756210364,0.09289722496078884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13552795137908485,0.0,0.0,0.08902942330378577,0.0,0.0,0.09031825356456004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062464539334281075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982353235062293,0.0,0.06390701391511756,0.1609785811625783,0.09631000026924444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926678225950193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19793676865949095,0.0,0.07872245858587668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865851068436523,0.14691336913905734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036158172593093,0.0,0.18793476862854874,0.0,0.07096578735507214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09636807112225286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0740919614627577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21405954742837566,0.06124126241932248,0.05906615400498005,0.0,0.0,0.05375174750026405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874202056364106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09394077755326327,0.13096612111262845,0.0,0.0,0.2374473379843975
mentalhealth,ForgettiSpaghetti2,2020/04/10,"I forget years of my life due to dissociation from C-PTSD  So there's a lot of elements here. But basically, I forget up to 6 years of my life if I feel like I'm under threat, scared, or accidentally hurt myself (i.e. stubbing my toe). I usually forget back to February 16th, 2018, and don't remember my boyfriend, new friends, memories, or anything. I've been misdiagnosed with epilepsy and was on the wrong medication for 1 year. I'm now getting psychological help although there is only so much they can do since they can't use hypnosis.

I have PTSD now and many of the common symptoms. Staring into the distance for hours without realising, flashbacks of false memories (and real ones), panic attacks, hallucinations, etc.

Why hypnosis? I used hypnotherapy for relaxation back in 2015, but it quickly turned dark and sexual. By mid-2016, there were several online individuals who were controlling my mind. I don't remember a lot of this time thanks to memory blocks, but bits and pieces come back in flashbacks late at night. I have around 60 trigger words that can completely change my personality, make me do and feel things that aren't real, and even believe I'm in a completely different reality. I was made to believe I was a person called Winter who lived in a hostel, carrying out sexual favours with very little IQ. I have had two 'forgets' that have been so bad that I've reverted back to her, and my boyfriend has had to deal with it. In early 2018, I was 'strongly advised' to look for someone who could own me full time which would potentially lead to sex traffiking or complete loss of self. That's when I met my boyfriend and he helped me get out of everything.

It's really overwhelming, especially at nighttime with nightmares.",7.947388888888887,8.112263350000003,8.158333333333335,68.23555555555556,62.375,11.861111111111116,37.46527777777778,11.429527900616536,4.475788194444443,1392,63,242,38,18,456,191,320,0.095,0.847,0.057,-0.8417,1,0,0,0,0,2,46.0,0,0,2,4,17,15,2,3,8,0,26,6,1,7,0,51,42,22,0,3,8,0,2,1,1,1,4,0,0,3,14,19,0,2,4,1,0,2,5,9,0,2,12,4,28,6,42,28,8,40,0,3,2,1,17,16,0,6,23,161,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800611505679321,0.08660847809922018,0.0,0.11068110257000044,0.0,0.2992391597280509,0.08123285304420227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21922439862029588,0.0,0.0,0.10621517725833013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09934368254367808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291962441247957,0.08380647981821306,0.3060192636222808,0.0,0.10911869455052063,0.07767792549401127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003014301311384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164705113763173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850375602891724,0.06425894300389777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08743772774593456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09838521209535796,0.06950379595373185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516579692524701,0.0,0.10165972722886364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042249809860804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581077743140824,0.0,0.10415065827251417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974704266457763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743721394999306,0.047530843272033975,0.09750985913298063,0.08590860586557299,0.0,0.08169886240007533,0.0,0.0,0.16542448296167842,0.0,0.09205788615462812,0.06494164407752318,0.09863650662995248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980091582727301,0.0,0.0,0.09823488379057012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151913906082465,0.0,0.0,0.09396301856520356,0.0,0.09129981235127396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592603266794786,0.07399321668430227,0.0,0.1141485250760507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16989926306459935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22745295450882635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2214740033215533,0.062326286367567076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22042057625767986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09740398281451218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149439685730352,0.109909692046123,0.0,0.08047906238082236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243326468688264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10112127144331766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957130359395102,0.0,0.0,0.06463496745371602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346083712225227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10582327874543257,0.0950379204378129,0.0,0.0,0.168054163280355,0.10715088243413637,0.0802742086347228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877888405421324,0.0,0.0,0.09378381902542254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06911182625281209,0.10637103686000532,0.0,0.1879541712110925
mentalhealth,antigone03,2020/04/10,"ill and losing patience (vent) I've been ill for several months. I have this health condition where I can't digest food very well, so eating is a real hassle. I'm physically sick and weak most of the time, everytime I seem to think that I'm getting better something happens and I'm bedridden again.
Two days ago, I had a ""flare-up"" and I never felt weaker than I am now. I've lost weight because I'm not eating (I'm already underweight to begin with) and I look horrifying... I can't bring myself to look in the mirror. It's not that I don't want to eat, but the pain and the discomfort that accompany eating are too much to handle, not eating suddenly seems like a more viable alternative. I've truly lost all will to eat, I only eat because I'm on medication and because my mum makes me. I know I may sound whiny, but it is what it is. I'm very ill and I'm very sick of being ill, it's too much to handle. Suffering on daily basis has made life much more difficult for me than it already is (I'm going to avoid talking about other stuff bc I don't intend to make this any longer).
I'm feeling really depressed. I wanted to get better before, now I just don't care. I just want the suffering to end. I'm not even suicidal, or thinking about suicide. I'm a person who really fears death and the unknown, but when I'm in physical pain all the time, this fear vanishes and suddenly it seems like I can let go easily...
Today, I had to weigh myself and found out I'd lost 3.5 kilos while I'm already underweight. I felt mortified, but somewhat relieved?? Is this normal? I'm sure it's not. I think that I felt that the end was a bit nearer and it's all very ridiculous! I want to get better and I want to gain weight and be healthy, but why can't I find the will to do so?",1.1711206328279502,3.2221364336043368,3.48916135647843,87.8099934080422,81.6829268292683,6.482414121438513,21.084084084084086,7.63319966405982,0.8609092653629236,1380,41,291,23,37,475,175,369,0.22399999999999998,0.6559999999999999,0.12,-0.9940000000000001,0,1,1,0,0,1,52.0,0,0,0,8,15,25,1,4,14,0,27,24,0,4,5,62,76,24,3,6,13,1,6,2,0,3,13,1,0,1,21,16,12,1,13,0,0,3,12,16,1,1,12,9,29,9,29,58,11,27,0,7,2,0,4,7,0,7,19,171,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388574545257487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385932567097344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049010101233621116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1317996894796674,0.0,0.061326299142477135,0.0,0.0,0.191220291337244,0.07868182195226711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07348021296445632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04647921610432052,0.0,0.062073823198846766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5162195304533623,0.0,0.0,0.1276653347318099,0.0,0.0,0.04760158428184555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621976720866074,0.03644077965428373,0.0,0.2075956326851197,0.0,0.06587071445828914,0.0,0.08714738314814817,0.07902108321104828,0.0,0.0,0.11296087005649895,0.0,0.08191813359719051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06373130179865583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660708650993009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03960781132852633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07369650277436053,0.05090520336527941,0.07041956609412876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12104137112968667,0.08062794431179042,0.236018899302356,0.0,0.0,0.06819441811130111,0.09621462786184712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07260298706794961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05752562144621017,0.0,0.15893932423829502,0.0,0.055584860826727985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706133410948884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054812515980367536,0.15337521603383542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292878245524837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08203148808959695,0.09233983115222501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19682958359298372,0.0,0.08141863567547106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055483040811778316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250295764932437,0.15766586115261522,0.0,0.06792516345420588,0.0,0.0,0.05792717131558856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385387221953592,0.0,0.0,0.08404924433064571,0.0,0.06831397468050285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704019606954548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23786133598571196,0.21254389578954316,0.0,0.0,0.1755237953549988,0.06479962472316245,0.0,0.06503200483422726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chili_nips,2020/04/10,"So much is happening I’ve self quarantined with my family since the first week of March already and so much is going on. It’s all really taking a toll on my mental health. Normally I’m very upbeat and rarely feel sad but this is different. 

To start, I’ve been isolated from people for a month already and by state orders I have another month to go. 

Because of this I am unable to see my dad, brother or uncle because they don’t live with us, but we are very close and it’s hard. 

Then it feels like my friends are slowly removing themselves from my life and it feels like I have no one to talk to. And when I do I feel as if I’m annoying them. 
I’ve been questioning if I am mentally stable enough to be in the relationship I am, but I also don’t know if I want out of it. I have so much to focus on, it’s just hard. 

Lastly and the hardest part is my cat. She’s 19 and had a stroke last night. She’s doing okay for what she can but still needs around the clock care from me and my mom. I’ve never been without her and I just want her to pass peacefully, if we have to put her down due to the quarantine we can’t be in the vet with her and that breaks my heart. 

TL;DR - I feel like I’m going to break, I feel so alone and I don’t know what to do. I have no one to talk to, I have never felt this depressed in my life and I don’t know how to cope with how much is going on right now. I just want a hug.",0.9896863330843928,2.279615582524272,3.098074433656958,94.01871732636295,79.2588996763754,6.695593726661688,19.327981080408264,7.468242284971852,0.2018811550908639,1081,23,266,15,26,368,145,309,0.08199999999999999,0.795,0.12300000000000001,0.9116,1,3,0,0,0,0,26.0,4,0,2,1,14,10,1,0,10,1,31,6,1,2,3,57,57,32,0,9,13,3,10,3,1,0,4,0,0,1,12,23,0,0,11,0,0,7,10,3,0,3,5,11,41,7,40,50,7,40,0,2,1,1,22,12,0,6,20,184,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470695510354523,0.2231281363372146,0.08084796972843135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600998352501237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999858239196754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325670678613923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307606679157157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707548995737828,0.0,0.0,0.10562580832133403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044611760595644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09530612105548923,0.0,0.3067088746244232,0.21667312175363435,0.09706985702686437,0.0,0.0,0.08599383871266403,0.0,0.0,0.07810800185040605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298251099024252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940055636596586,0.0,0.18112775650087706,0.0,0.0,0.10746236091646688,0.0,0.11980152141938955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16668231791633398,0.16481659556520245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14281690077997444,0.14817401049850668,0.0,0.0892713151513218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20376584881862156,0.0,0.0,0.11840466148877303,0.16139078968876786,0.0,0.2972744133429665,0.07496282632993664,0.15594589607266027,0.0,0.0,0.09487354892501323,0.099054496025937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13701313342660554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947919493872617,0.0,0.07008856799206807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163133256788726,0.11325280722776665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06476591601587506,0.0,0.0,0.10854133074303464,0.0,0.08633707089533994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056195267958542,0.0,0.10546717871454353,0.0,0.0,0.08362924375845777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155762779674761,0.0,0.08073692913611895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07601305370084106,0.16251735640615647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160834934504625,0.0,0.0,0.16683274289811453,0.1788905168998992,0.0,0.08109465292044704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745478674643586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HugBeast00,2020/04/10,"I'm afraid of failure and success I'm 20 years old and I've always wanted to have my own company - to be my own boss. I also have asperger's syndrome, so it's super hard for me to be in social situations - also that's why my own company, job interview is too much for me. And I've been stuck for a month or so, too afraid to do anything (I want to make soy candles and sell them online) because I'm too afraid that if I launch my store, people are going to hate it. And what if they like it? I'm super afraid of that too. Do you have any advice on what to do in that situation? I also always wanted to learn how to draw, but every time I try my hands start to shake and I always hate the outcome.",2.1837688139674896,2.9542947218543065,4.4550270921131885,87.57201685731488,75.29139072847683,7.080313064419025,22.33654425045153,7.348242739294969,0.6637099337748342,537,13,122,6,11,188,82,151,0.098,0.8320000000000001,0.069,-0.6557,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,2,3,10,11,2,5,2,0,11,1,1,4,0,18,24,16,0,5,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,7,0,0,2,2,16,4,18,20,4,10,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,3,6,80,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203306797118433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3978079838348855,0.4139155431128483,0.0,0.0,0.11276028204003673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136452095850752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107963994111842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970677967677647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09423681665725593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14853819226419634,0.32741711728105866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16454637969411542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100911785572618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068318878146363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13235241583939453,0.0,0.12189353199477718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17399556046751896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149556466557084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37276732386915495,0.0,0.1690281045323194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173651226182071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09668839950767154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125778959784243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934069797677865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962277208491082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067797985402975
mentalhealth,BrookeyDucky,2020/04/10,"Just a message for everyone out there, you deserve love and happiness. Hi, I just wanted to remind you that whoever and wherever you are, you deserve to be happy. Everyone deserves to be happy. To anyone who thinks they aren’t good enough, you are enough. Like everyone else, you deserve to have happiness in your life. Well done for getting this far and persevering, that goes to everyone, you deserve praise and appreciation for going through so much. Even if you don’t feel like you deserve the praise, you do, you’ve come so far, keep going. All of these hardships that we face will lead us to a more peaceful and happier life in future, it will be worth it. I’m not saying we won’t struggle in the future or that things will automatically get better, but I’m saying there’s always a rainbow after the rain. Keep that in mind, things get better. You are strong, even if you don’t know it/feel like it. Reach out to someone, it’s good to be listened to, helped and  have someone to positively counter all the negative opinions and thoughts in your mind. You are enough, you deserve love, you deserve happiness. Don’t tell yourself otherwise. When you overcome things, you become more able to help others with the same things you suffered with, that’s the best thing you can do for someone, understand and help. I’m proud of you, no matter who you are or what you’ve got going on. Keep going, it’s okay if you make mistakes, we can learn from them. You’re doing great and I’ll never stop believing in you. Don’t let your negative thoughts fool you, you have value, you have worth. Accepting yourself is hard but when it happens, it’s totally worth it.
You deserve to be happy.
:)

Note: Hi, I hope this helps you, someone reminded me that there’s a brighter future waiting for me and tbh I really needed that. So, I decided to share my own message to help/remind anyone who’s forgotten or doesn’t know that they’re great and deserve love, no matter what they think or what anyone one else says.",3.7541269087744316,5.844796355091388,4.34106337526703,84.61098425508348,73.69973890339428,7.253390299865495,27.010760344963998,8.101407402915765,1.7822957354221065,1576,59,298,25,33,500,163,383,0.069,0.63,0.301,0.9986,1,0,0,0,0,0,59.0,4,31,3,8,13,32,0,1,10,1,32,6,1,2,4,63,65,25,0,7,12,0,2,3,0,4,2,4,0,0,32,19,0,5,11,0,3,6,13,4,1,1,4,6,45,28,36,51,12,25,2,1,0,3,60,11,0,9,11,207,77,2,0.07382264420010051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061426353783209535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15485552786004933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08153131056841942,0.0,0.08317284011155955,0.0774723105927961,0.1305802593228819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359167127474608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0755461956913199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333869302876005,0.0,0.0,0.2288355764861863,0.0,0.0975183205124542,0.0,0.0,0.28216280053244763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465389405968703,0.10547782353402717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570785403183086,0.0,0.16782043976968125,0.12383786292682684,0.05904271239371029,0.1627794516948781,0.0,0.0,0.06528112046312241,0.47151346486498796,0.06613058895822631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2474088114638676,0.0,0.0,0.07332254276571161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19685087433198026,0.0,0.0,0.08114198924688171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07548865533177193,0.10428623358698252,0.10819804509113108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19988345585715864,0.0,0.049277188245793926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907965234366566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05426813762938202,0.05473855527104637,0.056936574228773365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050024134255036684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04729267621142428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17612018907568885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501987474688397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061719036110474364,0.0,0.07717545633243537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452424489564391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452224226626788,0.09460513915139727,0.0,0.11721386685100682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685197610768392,0.08879955143028229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043542508227977686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637542287904613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bennettyolo,2020/04/10,Book Suggestions please What is your list of top books about mental health?,4.283076923076924,7.6896730769230786,1.468076923076925,96.11442307692309,87.46153846153845,5.676923076923077,14.192307692307693,7.1686216300943375,-0.06896923076923045,62,1,11,1,2,16,13,13,0.0,0.728,0.272,0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,2,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5807183673013685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5505675197742427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5997012456619311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NotInAGoodPlaceATM,2020/04/10,"I’m freaking out. At the start of this whole Coronavirus shit I was super happy about getting a couple weeks off of senior year. But now school is technically over. I don’t know if I’ll ever have a graduation ceremony. I don’t even know if I have all the credits to graduate. I don’t know what work my teachers want me to do. I barely know how much time has passed since this started. I can’t shake the feeling of being a failure and I am constantly having panic attacks at night. I keep forgetting about it all and I’m like “sick, no more school. That place made me feel like shit anyways.” But most of the time everything is just so overwhelming and every thought about school, graduation, friends, and everything else just dump on me all at once. I can’t sleep normally anymore. I am consistently staying up until about 6 am or later and sleeping until upwards of 4. I just feel like shit and can’t shake panicking over everything.",3.8389743589743617,5.732384142857146,4.896945054945056,81.56472161172161,72.95604395604396,8.15003663003663,28.616849816849808,8.841846274778883,2.353033992673992,742,30,141,15,15,243,107,182,0.191,0.6890000000000001,0.12,-0.9325,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,13,17,5,4,7,0,18,6,5,2,4,34,34,15,0,4,8,0,3,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,5,7,0,1,8,0,1,3,7,10,0,0,3,3,16,7,22,30,7,28,0,1,0,0,1,10,3,4,17,96,21,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208882916418313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13867454304869106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172650491953586,0.0,0.0,0.13487584434489774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182864696940493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051130094427439,0.11026210593452168,0.10270281920188387,0.0,0.3286573767020781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18490316792936867,0.1741653619313631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417671399602222,0.0,0.06368574170555075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12976078843282374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10834695744827788,0.0,0.0,0.2679638894986281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17865700155903952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153411467729782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960774421471872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143913411075455,0.1194324105246112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12981549162771056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301894530362114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735560128562198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3700964345330353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37537414165070304,0.10083380939929858,0.0,0.2439684956965601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17255753796275292,0.12992514729808946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677197945260244,0.1421573274615621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07189754633568657,0.0,0.09777779169569073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13609277184173782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08874189692227236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849716648876948
mentalhealth,messedupcole18,2020/04/10,"I want to start cutting. I've been contemplating this for a long time now and I started researching about it. I found that starting slow, particularly with a hair pin helps your skin get accustomed to the cuts. Please don't tell me that I shouldn't do it. Help?",2.0294117647058805,4.6989083137254894,2.76421568627451,90.3839705882353,83.50980392156862,6.537254901960785,22.225490196078432,7.793537801064563,1.0228666666666664,208,7,44,4,6,65,41,51,0.124,0.748,0.129,0.0624,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,2,2,2,0,3,0,4,2,2,0,0,5,10,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,2,6,0,5,7,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,7,25,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273180451784004,0.0,0.0,0.1559673683110393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4001909969952377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26418586950826256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3276915966616752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6338941266331465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26092463868171234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17407274891153546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17607820510035255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StrictPhilosopher1,2020/04/10,State of Anxiety; the feelings involved-we're in this together and it's okay to not be okay! [accepting anxiety](https://drive.google.com/file/d/1h0kPnsLyszXkBpECMDcLG9JSxiX5jsQd/view?usp=drivesdk),15.141466666666664,21.102097279999995,7.956000000000002,52.86466666666666,56.2,11.333333333333336,44.33333333333334,10.504223727775694,6.8339333333333325,172,9,17,5,3,43,24,25,0.08199999999999999,0.721,0.19699999999999998,0.3382,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,9,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8342423053210608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5513980195943781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raikandu,2020/04/10,"My family just won't stop fighting and it's starting to affect me in a bad way Apologies if this seems like a venting post or a post that doesn't belong here.

I'm a 25 year old male with a reserved and socially awkward personality. Currently locked down in the house with parents and older brother. So we've been in lockdown for 2 weeks now. In these 2 weeks I've felt like my family members are just looking for reasons to scream, yell, fight and basically make life hell for each other. And it's starting to severely affect my mental health now.

As someone who has grown up witnessing constant conflict and bickering in the house, I just can't stand it anymore. My parents have had a rocky marriage from the start and I feel like constantly seeing and hearing them fight all my life has fucked with my head in a bad way. Their fights give me literal headaches now and I've developed a habit of just running away from any kind of conflict or confrontation.

This lockdown has now doubled my misery with nowhere to go and my brother also joining in the screaming matches. Feel like I'm living in a pressure cooker that keeps blowing up every few minutes. Mentally I'm very tired and now I'm starting to resent the very family that I thought I would die for.

Any advise for the guy who's feeling absolutely hopeless and absolutely hates his own existence right now?",7.742003284072246,7.393120061302682,7.504469074986312,74.46422413793105,62.94636015325671,10.215763546798028,38.566228790366715,9.606745405546679,3.717526327312534,1100,52,195,18,14,350,149,261,0.21899999999999997,0.726,0.055,-0.9929,3,2,0,0,5,1,16.0,0,0,2,0,13,21,9,2,15,0,11,6,1,4,1,40,34,18,1,2,7,4,4,4,0,2,4,4,0,3,12,17,0,4,7,0,0,3,3,16,0,0,4,10,17,5,31,28,5,40,1,1,2,1,22,13,2,4,23,119,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451715260986263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14374037253306418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481223311269904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929558945355592,0.0,0.17648699268953222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284183017765464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968550769010862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08904511496789455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988944065617581,0.0,0.1603142345472882,0.15100437161435504,0.10147524975227627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770511566393744,0.0,0.10138375728237406,0.06006385798074945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464587552717523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10434316401179963,0.10846445037384507,0.11233940429055957,0.11911593916002365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438951873955494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09393868013923527,0.0,0.11005583138101573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492984652432645,0.20653160081707772,0.0,0.0933227809142388,0.0,0.08874972373123048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054630629136847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130135042244032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089980544665694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23470386004917426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228104416732333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20243617874328085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866293416739436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09025536969277652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421815503889664,0.0962126750712046,0.0,0.1193952341308126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773369077512017,0.0895475071782332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992207210255104,0.0,0.0,0.08835832928899302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390297465047243,0.0,0.1214706487880036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17440423599015098,0.0,0.16777744679312925,0.1695500624132803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07507638792400394,0.0,0.0,0.06805839673112132
mentalhealth,sticky_astronaut,2020/04/10,"Lockdown pressure on a teenager Hello kind reader, I am seeking help. My story begins a few months back to last year around August. I was feeling great, I felt confident, charming, intelligent, all the great things in life. After the girl I loved for the first time in my life hooked up with my best friend and college applications were being due, my sanity went into the negatives. All of this occurred in November, one of the hardest and longest months in my entire life. Now, after months of trying to get back my confidence, I just saw on social media a post about me, which was very humiliating. Now I feel like garbage once again. You may be thinking, “man this is nothing, a little bit of pressure and some girl not liking him back, pathetic”. And if you didn’t think that,well, you now know what I think. 

Basically what I’m trying to say is that I’m truly sad. I have talked with a psycologist but these ups and downs in my mood feel like they will never end.  My mind doesn’t stop lashing myself and I really want it to stop.

I don’t know if someone will read all of this or care to respond, but I am trying everything to feel again as I did once before. 

Sorry if this post is badly formatted, this is my first post.",3.758595023122663,5.440278799163184,4.7199735741026245,83.6272010570359,72.72384937238493,7.374675181678045,24.712838581810175,8.032893268588372,1.3905849372384935,959,29,186,14,19,312,142,239,0.08900000000000001,0.754,0.157,0.9345,0,1,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,3,1,3,11,16,0,2,10,0,19,4,0,0,4,38,38,13,0,4,8,0,5,3,1,3,3,1,0,3,12,10,0,2,10,1,0,1,6,4,0,3,8,7,28,11,30,25,7,42,0,1,1,1,16,13,0,6,28,132,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09894496406596814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2563970227530971,0.09280363657039062,0.0,0.0,0.09457845503628452,0.0,0.11664259067726207,0.0,0.12134443564573545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332242635039147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844381847152317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989233178673414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22479834512841992,0.15880779212427473,0.10671916445951683,0.0,0.0,0.18908425122213052,0.0,0.0,0.08587239077493254,0.0,0.058070054331705215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24508133047061026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744999200481088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11574316296389316,0.1221676721146214,0.0906001610928132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355205949935393,0.16290336752674944,0.11139913458515394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10031508438866292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11222743154021583,0.0,0.26615095696927205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0857239118275363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10664915803055823,0.0,0.0,0.23673721778327475,0.0753165172336711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31934614457121435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111777179027735,0.0,0.07120402413652031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883890642870444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11330102159618365,0.09417503449188866,0.0,0.0,0.12442068293451122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18584880742407173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933626265172412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384155307274168,0.21365675886452706,0.0,0.0,0.06481108257724366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263858544494087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917084431351784,0.06555775767412815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10303497561006864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0715754358952603
mentalhealth,justchristina01,2020/04/10,"iPhone SE helped me with my phone addiction So, I bought an iPhone SE just a few moths ago. I'ver never used iOS device before and I really wanted to try it because even nowadays in 2020 I can see people running around with their iPhones (older ones e.g. 5, 5s) and they still love them. I've always known that iOS is way more minimal that android is. My average screen on time on my android was aroud 8-9 hours daily which was crazy. Yes, I used my previous phone as my laptop too because it could easily handle all of the tasks I needed to be done. But I was sick of it. I was really anxious after staring at my screen for such a long time. I needed some change. And here we go - I bought used iPhone SE in 2020. I use it only for texting and using apps such as Telegram or Facebook Messenger to communicate with my friends and especially classmates (especially now due to COVID-19 situation and online classes). I have no other apps there. No games or anything like that and it's pretty distraction free in my opinion. Except for those apps I alredy mentioned, I also use podcasts, listen to audiobooks or listen to the music in general. And that's it. I've had this phone for around 1,5 month and I'm really really surprised. It really did help me. However I kept my older phone (Redmi 7 which is way more powerful in terms of battery performance) I don't use it that much. I allowed myself to check my social media only once a day (every morning) and play games on it when I'm done with all of my responsibilities. Also, I have it for Netflix or Youtube due to its bigger screen. But like I said - I don't use it often, I don't carry it with my everywhere and I keep it home. iPhone SE has become my daily driver, it can do whatever I want with a smooth performance and I'm really happy to be able to say - I'm fighting successfully with my phone addiction.",3.09303985013624,5.074697100817438,4.701886069482288,81.77950485354225,75.26702997275204,7.639271117166213,24.547769073569484,8.472884824447931,1.7382153269754763,1464,48,278,28,32,492,193,367,0.048,0.8340000000000001,0.11800000000000001,0.9772,3,0,0,0,2,0,45.0,1,0,3,4,16,11,1,1,7,1,23,4,0,9,3,54,49,24,0,5,8,0,1,2,1,0,3,4,1,0,25,22,0,2,1,4,4,2,6,2,0,1,12,10,43,10,41,34,8,33,0,0,5,1,22,12,0,7,19,182,68,3,0.09214572144097824,0.0,0.0,0.2009048751799831,0.0,0.0,0.08168162230273925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14737780029003614,0.07667262187873376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409843699147314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07582807742162816,0.16405845621977758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11234235304951068,0.10176770980990184,0.07840922209320053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747795519791473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357086060502624,0.0,0.0,0.059426367304093015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18859413069055347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0608613799647697,0.0,0.07763674452640201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07119155580795478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236853699389184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09809083391664916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352666946688425,0.0,0.09242967170819448,0.0,0.0907449742772646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190335105689682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09003549007177747,0.0,0.0,0.08154606381851442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316511120964304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354983573272704,0.0,0.06773770768171558,0.13664976974857698,0.07106846097881965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813218602362354,0.062440325598421616,0.1401619468021967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06388224101883114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937453256903087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35418545208682833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765168224825841,0.0732779761483119,0.0,0.0,0.07342820984168733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103575651654044,0.0,0.0939309588247496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07358769217224602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746182237699396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06256089625441186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6366745425891445,0.0,0.0,0.10869986783841784,0.1462819692991202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jasta10,2020/04/10,"I just read an extremely ableist article about a condition I suffer from, and I am upset in a way that's difficult for me to describe. It's not like this was a doctor writing this, or anyone in any sort of power to change how I might live in the world with this condition, it's just some piece of shit who ""discovered"" this diagnosis, and decided it's not real and just people being too sensitive and obnoxious.  

I know. We get this all the time. 

But this feels different from people dismissing my better known, more common disorders. For major diagnoses, like OCD and depression and bipolar etc. These are well known, and there are plenty of people to back you up in knowing your struggle is real and documented -- that some rando with no expertise is just full of shit. But since this disorder is rare, I feel weirdly deligitimized. It's painful. 

It's painful. When a condition finally receives a name, you feel legitimized, but by giving it that name, you leave it open to randoms to give their opinion suddenly too. And randoms assume, because it's new (newly described actually, but they assume it's ""new""), because they cant compare it to anything they know, because they cant compare it to anything they've ever experienced... it must be made up by weak snowflakes begging for attention. 

[Anyway, here's the ""article""](http://chezgigi.com/2016/01/31/daniel-boone-put-misophonia/)",7.931592442645076,8.778409392712554,7.552647773279354,70.2427908232119,62.360323886639684,10.959136302294198,37.11443994601889,10.793553405168565,4.3149068286099865,1108,51,178,27,15,350,144,247,0.14,0.833,0.027000000000000003,-0.9597,2,0,0,0,0,0,57.0,1,4,5,2,15,15,2,2,9,0,13,8,2,2,3,53,23,16,0,1,11,0,3,2,0,2,6,0,0,0,24,13,0,0,12,1,0,1,5,11,1,0,2,4,18,4,27,17,8,20,0,2,0,0,17,9,2,10,11,129,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.12172015493896615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482183915764407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08721531088907769,0.0,0.20528713688152012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591098477169643,0.0,0.2281058757414402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103150601421924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194960898439814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10743123794367228,0.12660005876224034,0.0,0.1303180878145657,0.2859066888679941,0.12766818920319134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13910882655356974,0.0,0.11282697155634384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18920429908198494,0.0,0.0,0.13663749005775405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516716969131599,0.2393080413486483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20564785527865045,0.0,0.0,0.1320728696904972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187522487078024,0.0,0.11014038398475373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802415867114778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323206317564164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409333230557142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654466646207678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594197849052389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538981838606386,0.0,0.0,0.12476546288518944,0.28394398352414474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560706131029365,0.1031793583896218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13039666410467746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273206241660335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900622459353536,0.0,0.0,0.11214878580934692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,han__banan,2020/04/10,"On lockdown with my ex About a month and a half ago my boyfriend of 2 and a half years told me he wasn't ""feeling"" our relationship anymore and didn't want to be with me. Later he said that maybe it wasn't definitive and that we could possibly work things out.

Fast forward to now, I've been out of work for 27 days. He's an essential employee so he's still going in. This has left me alone; locked in an apartment that we picked together filled with pictures and shared memories. Over the past week I think I am starting to realize that he doesn't actually have an intention of fixing things. The denial is wearing off and any glimmer of hope dissipating. I suspect he kust said that because we still have to live together in a 1 bedroom apartment until our lease is up in September.

Days are getting really hard for me. I can't eat, I can't sleep, I can't think of anything but this failed relationship. Still having to see him everynight is getting harder and harder to deal with.

Today I broke down and he told me to stop over reacting. I asked him how he expects me to be okay in this situation and he just brished it off. I'm never going to be able to get over this when the ONLY person I'm able to see and have seen for the past 27 days face to face is him.

How am I supposed to be okay living with a man I gave my heart to and who I thought loved me to? How am I supposed to not sit and cry while I think about how we already named our future kids which will never exist now? How am I supposed to deal with the fact that the person I thought I'd spend my life with doesn't want me anymore? How do I deal with not being enough? How do I deal with my EX being the only person I'll see for god knows how long? I have never felt this heavy before. I feel like I'm torn in a million pieces. It honestly hurts everywhere. I feel like I'm drowning under the weight of rejection. 

My mental state was already fragile before losing my job and being forced into lockdown. I don't know if I can actually handle this toom i have no family here. Him and his family (which I love) are all I have and I'm not ready to lose them.

I'm not okay.",2.8786009538950736,4.1286166216216245,4.306094329623743,87.44921303656601,74.22522522522524,7.295601483836777,24.77053524112348,7.827709963407826,1.1710929517753046,1676,52,361,23,34,557,203,444,0.099,0.821,0.08,-0.8181,2,3,0,0,0,1,35.0,7,0,1,5,19,16,0,0,17,3,41,10,5,11,5,74,79,29,1,6,7,2,7,2,0,1,1,2,1,5,20,31,2,1,13,0,1,4,17,6,0,3,14,13,53,10,58,56,3,54,0,6,4,2,46,22,0,2,30,238,73,4,0.1651735430744952,0.0,0.1611855514706715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320818996711585,0.0,0.0,0.08553498844546971,0.1822731120830448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056161836666396805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1638077712748843,0.0,0.0,0.06796187612617433,0.0,0.07720748299265781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05034412938640645,0.0,0.14055051955010694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593881692573017,0.0,0.09071769055763344,0.15978490622514535,0.3405733403277331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08450688509272128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853342118335794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15571091634175105,0.0,0.1252750594322019,0.1180000121756538,0.07929625201101005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944453845476042,0.0,0.09387193095502948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398152560226537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09786572191143987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202729871756133,0.0,0.0,0.08841084703086034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819546274028175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077505961241222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08973076892085173,0.0,0.058333479117755827,0.08069544990827164,0.0,0.14585126465436976,0.07308669395632406,0.0,0.1847869449443104,0.0,0.0,0.14907557143040942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296951242572917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08322804109357579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591997311727091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19108802856748025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256219225130632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576768366405746,0.0,0.2163347501581411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310417601780227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05290720060190697,0.0,0.0,0.17733457078911896,0.0,0.0,0.15711786382461668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974328931094903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283099145794982,0.08264641471596179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05845534196584416,0.0,0.19786170729398334,0.06904623899597383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973396261103012,0.1587548054801726,0.0,0.13112934313734972,0.0,0.0,0.07828260279958002,0.15783039876436375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09742363520427304,0.0,0.0662461265699145,0.1005684387265768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024830656563608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0531831731563217
mentalhealth,miraizuraa,2020/04/10,"Preventing relapse? Due to quarantine I have begun to eat fairly little and can feel my energy depleting, without really realising it. I know I need to eat but I look at good and feel mildly grossed out by it unless it is my mother cooking me a main meal or I’m snacking.

I’m thinking of ordering supplement drinks (max 1 a day) to try and up my caloric intake while also eating main meals and snacks. Do you guys think this is the right step to take in terms of preventing relapse?",3.446657894736841,5.350825915789475,5.0644078947368465,79.90398026315792,74.05263157894737,8.539473684210527,27.66447368421053,9.188382445141503,2.5476578947368425,382,15,71,9,8,129,70,95,0.042,0.894,0.064,0.6072,0,1,1,1,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,0,5,9,0,0,0,17,15,9,0,1,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,4,5,9,2,5,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,3,9,1,14,15,3,13,0,0,1,0,3,6,0,1,5,45,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726924981325318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13926775680582676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115455544310407,0.0,0.6629021563798406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21837828018944366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18112584660804693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138211842922998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867865893718292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21643532483658626,0.0,0.0,0.1813408406038721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601217419494384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834098578099474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18441730206019666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16236504365383314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767398518883338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661363432379787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081649129192264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,emerrrrr2015,2020/04/10,Family issues causing mental health spiral anyone w a broken family does this effect your mental health? my family is not close at all they honestly could care less about each other and it's basically every person for themselves w them no help from each other. i don't live at home and honestly rarely see them even on holidays even my siblings and that's how everyone likes it but it makes me depressed. i see other families w such great bonds and i want that it makes me feel alone and like i have a missing part of me i've tried to bring my family together but they don't want too. i know it's just something i have to accept but it's so hard anyone else have this how do you deal w it?,1.381994680851065,3.819064234042554,3.2454565602836887,87.49031250000004,83.9645390070922,6.645567375886525,18.03235815602837,7.865858978985527,0.7527762411347516,551,13,110,11,16,184,86,141,0.106,0.71,0.184,0.8594,0,1,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,4,1,9,9,0,0,2,0,8,2,0,6,1,26,19,11,0,3,5,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,14,8,0,0,4,1,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,4,18,7,9,18,5,5,0,2,2,0,9,4,0,0,2,74,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13392735039386947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180834721642235,0.13249455168596072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184133280129434,0.13283816866467651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032444289695488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13331411482554156,0.11137550168188214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131610564084483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802287071920057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17081758644895068,0.0,0.10895021873830724,0.12356234274582772,0.0,0.0,0.6095152063516968,0.0,0.06538360143652593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14256599639885892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158373886766147,0.0,0.0,0.2749034054209609,0.0,0.0,0.08667453626842153,0.0,0.1297096241212577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13496724168298138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106602477351373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12634978961791676,0.0,0.11418411214965997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17263238987103188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606304443295931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14003137123888226,0.0,0.0,0.11290950605268213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206088484843503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955003875712548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877937808052318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254213001928865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The-one-over-there,2020/04/10,"You are strong Even if it may seem like times are challenging now it will get better even if it may not seem like it will. You need to be around, push through, and remove those in your life that are holding you back",7.660681818181818,5.438292795454547,6.130909090909093,90.29136363636364,64.22727272727273,9.70909090909091,28.81818181818182,7.1686216300943375,1.1547636363636364,169,3,40,1,2,49,31,44,0.0,0.753,0.247,0.8957,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,4,0,3,6,5,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,0,11,12,3,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,4,7,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,6,5,30,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28375497234619595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24509898267770314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819083661714211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4210625794435008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653365652898913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22514246699405768,0.3114501816507225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363489973608999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5803558391932209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18586561850860436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MediocreCookie,2020/04/10,"I’m struggling to take my medications because when I do they make me feel sick I doubt any of you could help me on this one, but this is just me venting. For a while now I haven’t been taking my anxiety/depression/ocd/adhd medications because I’m scared I’ll feel sick. Its probably just a mental thing, like I feel sicker because I’m worried I will be. But it doesn’t matter how much I eat before or after taking them, it doesn’t matter what meds I’m on, they still makes me feel sick. Even the thought of taking them makes me feel ill. And if I don’t take them I binge eat, and my self-hatred just skyrockets. My parents think maybe it’s my body getting re-adjusted to the dosage, but it would still continue long after I should be adjusted. I usually just end up going to bed directly after taking them to avoid it.
Currently sitting here feeling sick cause I attempted to take them again. It just a frustrating cycle and whatever I decide to do nothing gets better. I don’t know maybe I’m just being dumb.",3.0636764705882342,4.82065134803922,4.476274509803922,84.34323529411766,74.73529411764707,7.741176470588236,25.235294117647058,8.4952907291091,1.7221352941176469,801,27,159,15,17,266,112,204,0.212,0.743,0.044000000000000004,-0.9895,2,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,7,2,14,8,2,4,5,0,16,11,1,5,0,37,43,11,0,4,11,1,6,1,0,3,8,0,1,0,11,3,2,1,11,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,2,6,31,2,15,34,1,19,0,0,0,0,10,3,1,3,15,103,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312663190402426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427623321205956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997462610086004,0.0,0.09294178919210956,0.0,0.0,0.09659997018804846,0.0,0.12132351523503265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11220338855989792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720667332863878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223527344465474,0.0,0.0,0.09674026309836034,0.0,0.0,0.07214158482407683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3313623657044061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413032166789175,0.0,0.062074656470894385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321071021179114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06002678952310976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05336144980569239,0.0,0.0,0.09666002123905673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2187240984285781,0.0,0.2194608730847161,0.0,0.12132351523503265,0.22006387514465175,0.11007235085223084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029238882420557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480361049870578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07401317630669918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12128060013739712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776221151276428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935252526624688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394471022664575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1744532490037249,0.0,0.0,0.11418489777276633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5748612827294021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256373617724868,0.06998648700079378,0.0,0.08671185140960286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12029507664992325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11092252439054293,0.0,0.07758977105586183,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raeven98,2020/04/10,"My doctor is completely changing my meds, and I want to give up treatment. After 2 solid years of progress, I went off my Vyvanse and relapsed with self-harm on March 6th. Landed myself in the hospital with stitches but avoided inpatient. I have since been going to therapy every week but I just had my first appt. with a new psychiatrist and it did not go well. She thinks I’m skimming for pills (because of the Vyvanse, which is a stimulant used to treat ADHD and *can* be abused if taken *incorrectly* ) and refused to acknowledge the fact that I have been diagnosed repeatedly with ADHD since I was 12. She wanted to put me on mood stabilizers and an antipsychotic and I’m so distraught. I have a doctor that refuses to acknowledge my proper diagnosis, and I’m going to be drugged to oblivion. I‘m scared and sad for what my future holds and I don’t want to live the rest of my life on pills I have to take every day.",3.3958707865168565,5.587595146067418,4.791446629213485,80.52514747191012,75.06741573033706,7.820786516853932,27.417134831460675,8.660442795831766,2.2487516853932585,728,29,135,15,16,242,110,178,0.146,0.8029999999999999,0.051,-0.9707,0,1,1,0,1,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,3,7,0,3,8,0,15,7,0,2,1,32,31,14,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,5,14,0,4,3,0,0,5,2,4,1,1,7,0,20,2,26,22,1,21,0,1,0,0,5,7,0,1,9,93,25,2,0.0,0.18214673379655985,0.0,0.0,0.3695108674780013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371331849178507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16262758280244036,0.0,0.1611845924039334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09914412391778774,0.0,0.0,0.1560342747327465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3147014859791602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17827977718835702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.259050901782754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076396742602775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14747329912254165,0.2621075268431255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085851314527291,0.0,0.0,0.13574776427333732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17076108208013996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14847487706364948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545426563149096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539120879121067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16037552141410125,0.0,0.0,0.2543366331914625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11558698421757843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17580541118582416,0.0,0.0,0.0985049619448572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277468952197624,0.0,0.0,0.2720245319305505,0.0,0.12331416659217832,0.0,0.13822311479952354,0.14251067560976927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899806998644546
mentalhealth,longdongjohnson13,2020/04/10,"Panic Attack A little over a year ago I had, what I believe was, a panic attack. At the time I was a semi heavy marijuana user for a about a year. I was headed home after meeting with some friends for a car meet and smoking a little. While driving I remember feeling kinda weak and as my mind became more and more focused on that I kept feeling worse to the point that I felt what I could best describe as a heart attack. It was to the point where I thought I needed to pull over and call an ambulance. I was able to keep driving and it very slowly went away. I knew then I wouldn’t forget it. But the next morning I kinda forgot about and for the next couple weeks to a month didn’t really think about it. 
One day I was with my sister going to eat lunch with my mom. I decided to take a hit of a wax pen right before. When I got there to eat I immediately regretted it. My mother didn’t know I smoked so it started making me anxious. Long story short I had what I believe to be another panic attack. 
I soon after quit smoking. I summed it up to the weed making me paranoid. One time after that I smoked with friends, hardly any considering how much I use to in the past. This once again gave me a panic attack to the point that I had to step away from my friends and to get some air and try to calm down. 
I quit all together after that. I never thought experiencing that would give me the anxiety I have today even after not smoking for almost a year now. To this day I am dealing with social anxiety and the feeling of depersonalization none of which I had before having a panic attack. This is just an open discussion for which I’ve never really spoken about with anyone but if there’s anyone reading that’s had a similar situation or dealt with panic attacks or social anxiety before I’d really appreciate hearing what’s helped you in dealing with it. Thanks.",4.002764444444445,5.149286965333339,5.559999999999999,79.93777777777778,71.34666666666666,7.795555555555558,25.88888888888889,8.167268648758528,1.6281822222222218,1472,45,282,21,27,500,182,375,0.129,0.8029999999999999,0.067,-0.9445,0,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,3,15,21,7,6,28,0,21,6,2,4,3,58,48,21,0,6,7,3,5,0,3,2,1,1,1,0,24,18,3,3,11,1,0,7,7,15,0,2,22,7,41,6,54,21,8,56,0,1,0,0,19,20,0,8,29,208,65,2,0.06519457869068769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05779106039350829,0.0,0.06528295322134321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0443345491270306,0.06836220017721871,0.14962102275890124,0.0736513170214335,0.0,0.09117113053997254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5191777153893605,0.12250490550839513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16642735397448866,0.14690392977209754,0.0684176881500076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06657095403406854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0520525661533643,0.07213656130054114,0.0,0.08409021968513164,0.13442549589151032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13342065968997271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043060404360483764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889301359176797,0.0,0.06259701941825888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15110750932284153,0.0,0.03406147655888006,0.06254058047448613,0.03705158147957332,0.0,0.052142060217048494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05840153698657054,0.0,0.0669084463730532,0.0,0.07347902838206008,0.07725588964812274,0.0436985518536294,0.0,0.06539547806779147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794793705023048,0.0,0.0,0.03582923546287415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13068419015685545,0.0,0.05769515058750991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703577504046837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582793959232254,0.07635510261825007,0.052037690718345325,0.0,0.04792551672202225,0.04834095402163787,0.10056415640909518,0.0,0.13867034810783185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06943009858470983,0.08835506753953618,0.0,0.0,0.4589507468209754,0.0,0.0,0.06223560228060492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18488984883840914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13868491879371922,0.06521222126956977,0.0,0.12529594953555115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0738527487329726,0.05567581398472125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328143799410186,0.0,0.1329153256565327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046145058351923736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04901820960997047,0.0,0.0,0.06002240889049839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041774053583282726,0.0,0.10351442635059864,0.07603096623090763,0.0,0.0617968375967728,0.0,0.0,0.04426283944643783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056307183771104836,0.0,0.0537923551484395,0.0,0.0,0.052295158549304464,0.0,0.0,0.06043602760280172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06643884541448887,0.04631235817802155,0.0,0.0,0.12594951356573536
mentalhealth,ayylmao2317,2020/04/10,"Can someone tell me what's wrong with me? Be as brutal as you can, I don't mind.

Before I start let me tell you a little.
A year and a month ago I arrived in the US with a broken heart. My ex broke up with me. I was really hoping to get back home but I couldn't. A few months later my mom and my older sister went back to my home country temporarily.
I am currently living with my aunt who I think (I am not sure) has Borderline Personality Disorder.


Now, what's up with me?

I can't:
-Hold a conversation with people
-Have friends to hang out with
-Believe in myself
-Actually do stuff to progress in my ""dreams""
-Get over my ex, though it happened a year ago and she's with another man
-Stop crying to sleep
-
I CANT TALK TO ANYONE
I CANT
NOBODY FUCKING UNDERSTANDS ME
EVERYONE WANTS TO GET AWAY
NOBODY GIVES A FUCK
MY MOM LEFT ME HERE IN THE US ALONE 
ALONE EVEN MY FUCKING MON DOESNT CARE ABOUT ME
NOBODY FUCKING LOVES ME
MY DAD DIED
GOD FUCKING TOOK HIM
I TRIED MAKING FRIENDS; THEY TOLD ME TO KILL MYSELF

I CANT TALK TO ANYONE",-0.14137144549763292,2.172499061611376,1.9133160545023704,93.08926318127963,96.29857819905213,4.722808056872038,17.02029028436019,6.4784943948869325,-0.061529739336493076,806,22,171,11,32,267,121,211,0.212,0.679,0.109,-0.978,1,2,0,0,0,1,25.0,2,2,1,1,7,15,7,0,10,0,17,8,2,1,1,24,38,7,2,3,2,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,5,12,0,2,2,1,0,3,8,9,0,0,4,0,42,6,29,31,1,28,0,1,0,6,27,11,5,1,14,115,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0976466033789074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1773988058999787,0.0,0.0,0.2072692252015884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049242962281428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13993210697479266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09401204877580084,0.15388383122545862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514585030722101,0.11273621536849253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10202042681686596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099139999647362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038491171230133,0.0,0.1146803381299854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609036296536043,0.0,0.0,0.09561404362029832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461613805470828,0.4625310222736386,0.1568356393080008,0.09598910472415928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848497233178196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11857458990194444,0.0,0.0,0.20074176942750147,0.09938467847813608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11070437334907203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10871824085663252,0.10232072505815222,0.0,0.0,0.10028895094662467,0.08835705472403138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031034769638042,0.0,0.06679252144546498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103463925923847,0.2343840714570009,0.15973792715289642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937076514563321,0.08737074902403481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641026244092693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001348024661704,0.0,0.0847826641537698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082477976763044,0.0,0.0,0.08365676268783767,0.0,0.0,0.1145476668271135,0.0,0.0,0.09430775834244674,0.0,0.0,0.160852956285489,0.17491813816355845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411603432101523,0.09831093602859288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561404362029832,0.11117316204905546,0.06793589536230922,0.0,0.0,0.10416863147091153,0.2407258268743065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05901947773683649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09275897567091107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10940267776662707,0.0,0.12887398822647006
mentalhealth,sforzzando,2020/04/10,"Am I a Sociopath? or have ASPD? So this might be a long post but I kinda need some insight and understanding. For the longest I have been curious on whether or not I’m a sociopath. But any insight you might have would be appreciated. 

When I was a kid. I developed a coping mechanism. I was smarter than most kids, more mature, and bigger. Therefore, I was bullied pretty harshly. So I developed a coping mechanism. I soon learned that I could analyze people: how they think, act, opinions, body language, accent. I learned to perfect building personalities for each person. I called it headspaces. Every person in my life no matter who I build a headspace and mask for. To make them like me. To build connections. I still do it today I lie to anyone and everyone and no one knows I  do it. They have no idea that honestly I don’t care about them or their feelings. I don’t care about their family dying or their animal. But I know that society demands that I be compassionate, caring, understanding, nice and have a smile on my face. But, I can’t stand it. It’s exhausting but I know if I don’t do it I won’t be able to build those bridges with people. To make those connections that I can manipulate in the future and use them like a chess piece in a game. 

Also, I don’t feel emotions honestly. When I am alone I feel nothing at all but boredom. It’s like I’m an empty slate. But when I have stimuli from someone or something. I swap into the headspace and I feel emotions again. But I do it only because I know society tells me I have to. But all of this is so ingrained In me I do it without realizing. It wears me down and tires me out. I can’t stand being around large groups of people. In large groups it’s impossible for me to put on a new mask for each person in seconds. Im better at one on one. I can manipulate and change my actions to satisfy them. Building a connection. 

But every relationship I build doesn’t last long. I haven’t had friends longer than a year or two honestly. As long as I have a use for that person Ill keep them happy and stay with them. I never break down any bridges I let them burn them. 

I tried explaining this to my counselor but she says she doesn’t see it. But I have never let her see my real self. I have a headspace for all medical personnel I deal with. So that I don’t end up in the mental asylum. And I don’t wanna push the idea with her and she put me in one. But I need to understand my own thoughts. 

Excuse my grammar please. But does any of this sound like a sociopath to you. And yes I am in a headspace now while writing this.",1.1924327401672166,3.5780259309021147,2.9606161553726547,89.56454829369856,84.31669865642993,6.065792641270048,23.225901948664564,7.401539286593446,1.0580828979472336,2014,75,420,33,59,667,221,521,0.054000000000000006,0.755,0.191,0.9975,0,1,1,0,0,0,62.0,0,2,13,2,17,17,0,0,23,1,49,8,3,8,6,97,77,48,1,6,24,0,4,4,1,4,5,2,0,8,27,23,0,1,21,2,0,5,19,1,0,6,6,8,84,16,56,59,10,51,0,0,2,0,42,22,0,13,23,311,111,2,0.0808220491409233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370726825530604,0.0,0.06463336349779426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16488529476596028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05651265596557739,0.0,0.0,0.07194875900489836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04926837099316824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07148053453098946,0.0,0.08977507656883031,0.0,0.0,0.08252834861970146,0.0,0.2472103968191445,0.0,0.0854990113698213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06452982968903351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0833239837800233,0.0,0.0,0.08388052685233999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07072791985339986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818278538662536,0.07158434628373099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619212445524825,0.07722893150697711,0.0,0.0,0.07619183495189223,0.0,0.16346422590604226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062442914678515975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603657419040986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18247651157293887,0.08730168220546236,0.0,0.0,0.07183835082529398,0.0,0.0,0.17767073811465595,0.06588075722505446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652920422159136,0.05708700350019045,0.15794228292345242,0.0,0.0,0.21457491050445693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789869079012647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141971159866265,0.0814496159852182,0.17147884387200382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119857050691057,0.12466989363752652,0.07805843869436949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775509359334353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21906844875584736,0.0614688103526902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680954972878488,0.3528534792904631,0.0,0.08871833955088758,0.0,0.0,0.07740518179910906,0.08222508002747646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16249696517278084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199318612074753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677263396982753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0642729374363819,0.0,0.0,0.12880941819867694,0.0,0.08431502388793731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848025995964152,0.06222076203674572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614555066840504,0.06454459284603832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064203332518397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0517875056381935,0.0,0.06416367910739787,0.0,0.09289305608376316,0.0766098523114383,0.0,0.0,0.05487286606804607,0.0,0.07895139810762328,0.2524158104950609,0.0,0.1396086013632073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07790957123030065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057413664811837364,0.0,0.0,0.052046749791785335
mentalhealth,Jrey209,2020/04/10,"Finding it harder and harder to get through the day. I am a 27 year old Male. This past few days have been one blow after another. A few days ago, I lost a family member due to the virus and even tho we weren't close. Emotionality it me hard then I thought it would. The following day came a call that I didn't expect, my wife saying that she was going to file for divorce. I feel like that was the last straw that broke me. I've always haven't been able to handle my emotions all that well, I might even say I'm bipolar. But now I feel like I've gone over this imaginary line in my mind, and I'm feeling more and more depressed as the days go by. Even have suicidal thoughts throught the day. It gotten to the point where today coming from work I cried on my way home and took me a while to just even go inside my house. I'm an emotional wreck now. Any advice would be much appreciated.",1.6800413354531007,3.5377518594594584,3.0054689984101763,92.897519872814,79.05405405405405,6.082670906200319,20.07154213036566,7.048011613610866,0.19804292527821987,694,17,157,8,17,225,116,185,0.11,0.8170000000000001,0.073,-0.8341,0,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,1,0,0,2,10,6,0,0,13,0,14,1,0,0,1,23,33,10,1,3,2,1,4,2,0,3,1,2,1,1,11,9,0,0,6,0,0,8,3,3,1,1,13,6,18,3,15,16,6,33,0,3,0,0,8,6,0,1,20,96,29,1,0.11366087551499895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110680920917181,0.10075350823924537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457495361137656,0.0,0.0,0.07729329294769734,0.11918333825177654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606046194852968,0.12999776198642718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790878003445733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485113464968133,0.439811170665294,0.0,0.0978959455321562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38355955985630896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30028774526563856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714935787666713,0.0,0.17241106136272316,0.16239870435686404,0.0,0.0,0.10388398108033227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059383116276950726,0.0,0.19378828461323405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10181781919028428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140111254828739,0.0,0.0,0.13114938994304742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09264878365969677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110579250880906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407427221319793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205762272421958,0.1147650831967194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08355382149147703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926796903576058,0.0,0.077019550815542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850216667520587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744626580334106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180775380446051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432654990681867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18046807823182534,0.0,0.0,0.10773721997087897,0.0,0.12628141482314018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902187125055282,0.0,0.0,0.1021947772103834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08274647106941319,0.0,0.0,0.1614828497520466,0.0,0.0,0.07319387731347529
mentalhealth,anon0402072,2020/04/10,"I'm not doing well at all. I'm supposed to be okay. Everything has caught up to me. I've spent the last 6 years battling depression and anxiety fueled panic attacks. The last two years I thought I had been on the right path to a good mental place. I got a boyfriend, started college, waned off my medication, got to a place where I didn't need counseling. I thought I had it all together. Everyone told me they saw a difference, that I just looked...happier...? All the while though I think I've just been pushing away the inevitable crash from this high place I've been at. The last week has been rough. Politics, the news, not seeing anyone but my roomates, staring at a computer screen and out my window because I can't leave my apartment. I'm breaking. Everything feels...not worth it. What's the big point? Where's the happy ending to all of this? I should feel thankful that I have the money for food right now, that I'm financially sound, that my boyfriend is safe at home, that my parents are okay....i should. But I don't feel much of anything except a creeping sense of despair and...it scares me. I don't want to go back to where I was a few years ago. I can't go back there. But I have nobody to talk to. How do I reach out to my parents when they think I'm doing better? I can't talk to my boyfriend because he's going through his own mental health issues that I have to be there for. I can't talk to my therapist because the school is closed and I don't feel comfortable talking over the phone. I just...I feel like everything is crashing and burning. I haven't cried in a long time, at least not the depression fueled tears, in a long time but tonight was my breaking point. I recognize I'm having an anxiety attack right now but I don't know what to do. I can't read the news, can't watch any more shows than I have already...I just....I don't know where to go from here. I'm supposed to be better mentally. I worked so hard to get on track and be in a better place but now I just... I don't know. Part of me is like, 'accept it already so you can fall back into your depression and not have to answer to yourself' and it's so tempting. I don't want to but I feel like I'm fighting a losing battle. Anyways...that's where I am right now. My heart rate is 120, tears are flowing down my cheeks, I'm curled up under a blanket listening to hail hit the side of my apartment. I want to run. I have to get out of this room but I don't have anywhere to go.",1.4830403645833314,3.3714729941406283,2.8821093750000024,93.39778645833336,79.80078125,5.9854166666666675,23.166666666666664,6.996647511020387,0.634033072916667,1911,64,427,22,48,621,211,512,0.12300000000000001,0.774,0.10300000000000001,-0.6726,2,0,0,0,2,0,83.0,0,2,2,5,26,26,5,2,28,1,53,5,2,1,4,56,96,22,0,6,16,2,7,3,0,2,2,2,3,0,15,12,1,1,14,2,3,10,20,12,1,1,17,14,58,14,58,72,10,79,0,5,5,0,16,43,0,0,27,268,73,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06593068019803493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820768159057467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05057887777651275,0.0,0.11379632922751172,0.0,0.0,0.05200609410862655,0.0,0.061205894074774524,0.0,0.0,0.1692290403503672,0.06987959463598771,0.1715738549541496,0.0,0.13601849858251952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1973411092915841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169958917364634,0.0,0.0,0.19218227902015872,0.0,0.0,0.07770808439311902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587590312166261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107036488086763,0.2005356255034972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18803610825337908,0.10626981857647144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993690545102026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771777512940896,0.0,0.2113506788703593,0.062383858450996275,0.11897208577342767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15835129663188074,0.0666271397672401,0.0,0.0,0.0790592218312423,0.0,0.08813704609540644,0.0,0.07858333324507773,0.07460614706715935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763021402973219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226268828928531,0.18188142823869605,0.0,0.07875445286270888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901046529893613,0.0,0.0,0.13164252382501276,0.0,0.08320878427241347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07492695417246828,0.2248634215644835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05467561755762769,0.05514956739618039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726532762814078,0.16517360630009878,0.08054299091097186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108323375724761,0.0,0.14062052057446442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439707934499955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2540700420859053,0.0,0.0,0.07446430400157282,0.07527344610410004,0.05926880103633956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052644389360644035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2391255063068797,0.0,0.06847630443755738,0.0,0.08635737374215861,0.0,0.09531549511710877,0.07307497759511589,0.11809398362192006,0.08673959753610355,0.0,0.0,0.07107036488086763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07265547459835699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13160835978737134,0.0,0.05966070445398895,0.0,0.0668738120579183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541473067978828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436889554103656
mentalhealth,Brewing-Thoughts,2020/04/10,"I help others but don't know how to help myself. I work in a social position. I enjoy helping people on the daily but each day it gets worse. My authentic smile is no more. I've been on the decline for sometime now. It came in suddenly. I was diagnosed with depression. Nothing new to me. I had that since my teens and didn't even need the diagnosis.My issue is that I have anger outburst. I have poor control over my emotions.  I've managed to control it by taking it in myself by self harm. I'm not good with rejection from people I've grown to like. I feel hollow or not connected with my body. I dissociate bad and often. I realized I was talking to myself on the floor not knowing what hour passed.I get really lost in my thoughts. Randomly cutting myself for no reason.

How do I cope with this?

Is this more than depression or am I just over analyzing it. I know I'm not normal...but then again I've never been normal.",1.0555080213903736,3.4831102459893053,3.3741978609625685,86.01070855614975,85.57754010695187,6.394652406417112,22.403743315508024,7.686295010490155,1.2975903743315509,724,26,143,14,22,248,108,187,0.221,0.6709999999999999,0.10800000000000001,-0.9799,0,0,0,0,0,1,24.0,0,0,0,4,7,11,2,0,5,0,14,2,1,5,1,33,27,9,0,2,9,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,11,8,0,2,7,0,1,2,9,8,0,0,9,1,24,3,24,18,3,20,0,4,0,0,6,10,0,4,9,102,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570859643077806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16723460725069236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17219681177274004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377243916039891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709664768242617,0.0,0.2593486141380674,0.15281193076728775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1693560779379873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994413126023017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612601588252704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573193744225913,0.0,0.0,0.12627985771898995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3027450452229682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14826807015248136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15714212980381567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24822615511024765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355442251483407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435047628255672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163592148639033,0.1161186461504846,0.14540864610287027,0.0,0.0,0.29502729506369746,0.14446326094534942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087541854150006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964505084629523,0.15479741288654608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15706352413323993,0.0,0.0,0.1245420983607847,0.0,0.0,0.15347364527279495,0.0,0.0,0.14890447422104247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319993802713706,0.1210118116416858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11952524114037574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10960710619838132,0.0,0.1534301893797628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SiLeNtE000,2020/04/10,"A majority of my mental health issues are because of stupid reasons but Google does nothing to help. I have stupid issues. I have problems that really should not be problems. What are these problems, you may be asking? My mind sometimes think that women have no attraction to men. This often leads to me having mental breakdowns because of a fear of being lonely forever and never finding someone who loves me. This, really should not be a problem. If you just look on T.V. or on social media you can see a lot of evidence for women having attraction to men. Yet, it still happens and it still is very hard to deal with.

To help with this, I sometimes go to google and type in stuff like “Do women like men” or “”Do women hate men”. And you would think that, because these are very simple yes and no questions that Google would be able to be able to help very easily, However, probably because very few people in the world have the same problem as me, Google pulls up no articles to help. I fact the articles that Google pulls up makes it worse. All the articles talk about how “women don’t need men”. Now that is absolutely a good message to tell, however, when I am in desperate need of an answer to a simple question then telling me that people don’t need me will give off the wrong impression. It is worse when I find an article that is just horrible and tells me terrible things like “men are disposable”. “Because that will obviously help my self confidence and mental health”. So, now I am stuck with a problem that should not be a problem that has gotten worse because of Google. Thanks Google.",6.656670345842532,7.025953526490071,6.582472406181015,77.75257542310523,65.05960264900662,9.757468727005152,31.678440029433407,9.586721724236666,2.8461384841795434,1263,45,230,23,18,400,142,302,0.223,0.63,0.147,-0.9826,2,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,4,0,1,13,23,3,1,15,1,37,3,0,4,4,54,54,17,0,16,9,0,1,3,0,8,2,0,0,12,24,10,0,0,8,0,0,4,9,14,0,0,2,3,20,9,33,37,5,22,0,1,2,1,34,9,0,8,12,164,44,2,0.15268026602149762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136771920459861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792174191191324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07870332505009027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06680576484478436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590387345741897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139546997107411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323241177220269,0.04338585684906415,0.0640304816363376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750732750424424,0.0,0.06838576444737099,0.0753700766015609,0.0,0.1622919831297372,0.0,0.0,0.2558459098808223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593585301479967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188779869996444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410648497522824,0.0,0.0,0.06490165113674799,0.06889995055998842,0.0,0.050957631575522654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2307986960517791,0.0,0.07708177221519877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698157239754716,0.05887821679780759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325041652858641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584927222097856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230757512637413,0.5113303813178672,0.0,0.0,0.17103684046446108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781088801502157,0.07849037116624838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060833202219226966,0.0,0.07963940789457777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781915186481643,0.06468274696691226,0.0,0.15100468711955442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219306576699078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739118808050461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06135930720119664,0.2001739232368845,0.0702837378559623,0.0,0.0,0.050716992234915034,0.0978313495076384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25195441887746284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23339135237392666,0.1084596803708346,0.08346595137240362,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hbelli,2020/04/10,"Social distancing taking a toll Is anyone else having a hard time with isolation and social distancing? I wouldn’t consider myself an extrovert or people person on the regular basis but it’s really getting to me to be so alone all the time. 

What’s worse is my family is in another province, and I’m stuck alone (thankfully still working) but away from family and good friends. Don’t get me wrong, I have some friends in the new province but it’s just been hard. 

Some days I don’t even think about or bat an eye at being alone and then other days, the feeling of loneliness just absolutely consumes me. 

This weekend will be especially hard as I was supposed to go to my home province for the long weekend but of course can’t, due to the circumstances. I’m just afraid that I’ll be in that dark, scary hole that’s so hard to climb out from.",5.125695509309967,5.970521843373496,5.862924424972622,79.90688389923329,68.51807228915662,9.650821467688939,29.548740416210297,9.800150414767053,2.7110313253012053,670,24,130,15,11,219,101,166,0.20199999999999999,0.722,0.076,-0.9639,0,4,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,8,6,0,1,10,0,16,1,1,0,1,21,26,14,0,1,9,0,5,0,2,2,0,0,1,1,8,6,0,0,2,2,0,2,4,2,0,0,3,6,10,4,21,17,3,20,0,0,1,0,5,7,0,4,11,86,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4298608625641976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14507009240985705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09673623945877996,0.14175402336984938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12998263599396287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17844621602088898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557212236697825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09137764471575466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26084463611830816,0.0,0.06995297880629987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21377486666082127,0.0,0.1445623908886294,0.0,0.07862643881032169,0.116039859807068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4957310528658392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13877446925183592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243375440862245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13361750015636292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591318380956873,0.12080026352786248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08862936403735226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820570216536867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048500698900086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10402058710003137,0.0,0.0,0.1273723838880852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864790480632685,0.0,0.0,0.161343831364926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071909698711937,0.0,0.14098857875987453,0.0,0.15126197786431722,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jayboss101,2020/04/10,"Sour. Hi, every morning I've been waking up in pain angry and sour about my life and past events that have happened (being picked on, trauma, abuse, loosing loved ones, people I know with addictions, Not feeling loved). Going through my day is just a cycle that never ends. Same think everyday. And going to sleep makes it worse. As I think about how bad it gets some times.",4.050761904761902,6.19052188571429,3.794285714285717,88.63904761904762,73.0,5.80952380952381,21.666666666666664,6.42735559955562,0.4029523809523812,292,7,54,2,6,88,58,70,0.258,0.695,0.047,-0.9491,0,0,0,0,1,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,4,7,2,3,1,16,15,5,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,3,0,1,1,3,4,2,9,13,2,12,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,7,32,8,0,0.0,0.2655521100063945,0.0,0.2443299156067914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187135460213672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454242880089035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985087002585995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18883542991306945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332460484716775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11709634173391588,0.0,0.2547514133284419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19819347064598972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231735327907228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15830649373487984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4045640920376438,0.0,0.14960553515049976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728594296948112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15187326310778293,0.0,0.23848537154363786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21395318374023545,0.15538042611380928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242873960428717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2872211864064781,0.0,0.0,0.13068940198091789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284030680118465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,zomcon_,2020/04/10,"Are there assault survivors out there having a hard time coming to terms with possibly having to vote for Biden? (If you’re pro Trump that’s fine but this post won’t involve any of that so please respect that and don’t comment if it’s irrelevant)

I’m a sexual assault survivor. I’ve been pro Bernie since last election. This election has really gotten to my mental state. 
Last election it tore me apart that someone could hold office for having assault allegations against them. *I am NOT saying that we need to just disregard a candidate if they do have allegations, however I think their candidacy should be postponed until an investigation can clear anything pending.*

I’d become interested in Biden a while back when I saw he was very active in supporting assault survivors in college campuses. After looking into that briefly, I saw back then that even some of the survivors he encountered, he made feel uncomfortable. Since then he has in a part of my brain that can’t see him as a credible assault advocate, let alone a president. 

Man I really, really wanted Bernie. I’m terrified as a woman to lose more of my rights to my body. I’m scared for people in this country who aren’t white. I’m scared for anyone in the LGBTQ community. The last few years has shown that if we continue down this road, so many of us will be beaten farther down in society. 

I’m nauseous at the thought of another four years of this. 
I want to do what I can to help avoid this continuing; but anytime I try to think of casting a ballot for Biden, I just flash forward to my mindset afterwards, and imagine myself reliving more trauma for possibly supporting someone who could be benefiting from our fucked up rape culture. 

I want to vote green. I want to be able to live with myself. Part of me wants so badly to imagine everyone just abandoning Biden and going Bernie all of a sudden or going green. But my realistic mind knows that’s not plausible in the slightest. 

I’ve had two arguments today alone with people I am extremely close with. I do value their opinion, but I feel as though they still just don’t understand the perspective I have and why this would be so difficult for me to vote Biden to vote for the “lesser of two evils” (Goddamn I am SO FUCKING SICK of hearing that).

I feel like if we continue to be a nation that just lets the Democratic Party hold us hostage, we’re never going to have real change. I feel like there needs to be a huge movement and shift in what is happening and I don’t know how to get into that. 
I want to be a part of that; then I start thinking of all of the people locked in cages in our own country. Locked in cages in general, but also during a pandemic. 

It just makes me not want to even vote because I can’t make the right decision, but then NOT voting is also a huge part of this countries problem. I feel like I am in a lose, lose, lose, lose situation. 

I just want to know if there are others out there who are also having this internal conflict, and if so, what the fuck man. What do we do? I can already feel myself dissociating.",4.941327561327562,6.200696966329968,5.79810485810486,78.68303030303035,69.23569023569024,9.024146224146225,30.13612313612313,9.362217197678863,2.6935072631072625,2434,95,454,50,42,799,265,594,0.198,0.7020000000000001,0.1,-0.9977,2,3,0,0,0,0,56.0,8,0,5,6,29,33,11,3,28,0,52,7,2,4,4,97,102,42,0,22,25,0,7,3,0,4,1,2,0,3,34,21,0,6,17,0,0,6,12,24,0,3,8,16,53,9,80,78,12,65,0,6,7,4,30,32,3,10,30,321,87,3,0.06825287200653399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413787828191346,0.07531874147438851,0.1637453912536253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046414293455152536,0.07156908737639005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047723995065287454,0.0,0.056166298139789066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10496449114932936,0.056988297201087584,0.041606317274928833,0.07537993477540225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581355429067715,0.0,0.07619277773930827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07220248857504956,0.058793805711322915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10898872902095112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09016075650429807,0.0,0.0,0.06521854411481548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2070642171350818,0.14627959619710965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18929604107374048,0.035659308590008106,0.0,0.11636904014809768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060355789306806684,0.0,0.06114116708754229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692594721900678,0.0,0.04574846139718485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11252998046395027,0.16690560082440695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958637180047728,0.0,0.1000347170299829,0.0,0.06026853643235161,0.0,0.05731522256041886,0.3817875268339492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458251777798743,0.09111864411319676,0.06919769950276254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878284173576618,0.0,0.06891594401990374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101217279527688,0.05264082254753073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29564483675701503,0.0,0.14195384283387352,0.0,0.0,0.07492115751038206,0.0,0.15388971600980572,0.06536738454583474,0.0,0.0,0.06530878075854595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768671079874223,0.13117361256617255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11657515953244643,0.0,0.054277423289285684,0.13666606337666293,0.0,0.054388702260079684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129189620590461,0.07671908781857997,0.0,0.0,0.11566087392438992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04830973410182906,0.0,0.05450683175024704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15490510063977653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131201053354816,0.06705810020766051,0.05418515645340291,0.03979879854206714,0.0,0.0646957420633438,0.0,0.0,0.046339219856251786,0.0,0.13334627684038852,0.07105364682561477,0.16419960253876786,0.0,0.0,0.05631576742439921,0.32205849824312505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06158760093076648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04848488200287685,0.0,0.0,0.08790522362779686
mentalhealth,Hardtobreakfree,2020/04/10,"Not sure how to deal with Father ghosting me I consider myself very emotionally stable, i don't worry almost at all. Wasn't always this way, i learned to handle my emotional attachments better out of necessity. 

That said i am not exactly sure how to process ghosting by my father. I grew up with my mom, and i almost felt like a guest at his house with his family that i visited weekly-biweekly while growing up. I was accepted for a while, but as my road got more challenging and started angling downward and most importantly when i got depressed, he and his family basically decided they don't like me, and my visits became limited to holidays.

Felt like they were waiting for me to prove myself, and to be fair i was a burden, i truly failed to take responsibility, i sought their help and guidance but when it didn't work i was to blame. I didn't know how to fix myself nor was even sure i cared to, seemingly no one else did. 

I briefly rekindled the relationship with them when i moved countries like 1,5 years ago, even left a fair bit of change with them just to hold onto for me, that i never asked back. Can only contact them via email, and we basically send like up to 3-5 message a year, and i thought Coronavirus was a good reason to open up and share what i was up to. They basically never do, and i always feel responsible for not reaching out enough.

I suspected i will be judged. They can't help but see me for who i used to be, not the person they kind of liked, but the person they didn't, the useless depressed guy, who was not above lying to pretend to have a sense of normalcy and was pretty annoying to deal with. Just talked with people to feel good but nothing ever got done.

Now i don't like dwelling on the past, it's pointless you can't change it, if anything if you keep seeing yourself as the person you were yesterday than that anchor hold you back. 

The current situation is that i sent them a message like over a month ago, followed it up with another short one a week later, totally relaxed just sharing more stuff i am doing. Replying slowly is definitely not out of character for them, but doesn't seem to be the case this time. 

I found myself speculating what was the last straw, especially annoying because i am doing the best i ever did. Perhaps i should have messaged them later so my achievements are more impressive. Apparently it never even warranted them belittling or halfheartedly accepting my achievements and pointing out what i should do instead. Of course we had good times too, and i didn't hurt them intentionally, they simply seemingly wired to interpret the actions of others personally. Who i was, was far from ideal, but i wasn't acting like that to hurt them.

Realistically i don't think there is going to be a resolution to this, maybe his christmas reminder will tempt him to write a line or two, but i think realistically i should focus on making new friends.

I would have preferred direct and honest replies. I suppose i should be glad for what i had and accept our relationship for what it is, rather than what i wish it to be.",8.688799854967362,7.222191541455164,8.794408387720576,69.60515862944165,61.673434856175966,11.894633792603335,37.01238820401258,10.839040174865172,3.885907855934253,2455,94,452,51,28,809,277,591,0.069,0.6990000000000001,0.23199999999999998,0.9987,3,0,0,0,0,0,59.0,3,4,17,9,22,41,2,1,23,0,61,0,0,7,12,108,91,40,2,11,22,3,4,9,2,7,0,1,0,5,27,31,0,5,22,3,0,11,24,10,0,3,33,7,88,31,71,44,9,64,0,6,2,0,64,23,0,10,38,344,115,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532311467280184,0.0,0.15286607487035048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702463186033358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003820825293223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06281273147534537,0.0,0.07135784315461778,0.0,0.0,0.11738545382855545,0.0,0.04652979671481591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010317336391604,0.06750730080469906,0.08333212001584682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782308255722367,0.0,0.1614931258395842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15738486775991478,0.1314850916336644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07811165000942714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06376356039057056,0.17172098258863058,0.0,0.07886884881770535,0.0,0.1512448810625783,0.1380889299778241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14391344873699768,0.0,0.07718904693040861,0.0,0.14657671237097047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369143248767327,0.058972035561614684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043379853001729834,0.19206486279693247,0.1831431871810852,0.0,0.0,0.0755782736943255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232420210424667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08807407426641851,0.16342476431189926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784522793928092,0.0,0.0794855000626461,0.04194873485766645,0.0622187861970307,0.0,0.0,0.08293229990940508,0.0,0.0,0.3356169461290442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05095057992637436,0.0,0.07668331131651207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939626853276841,0.06092553364168294,0.08112625198511106,0.0,0.0,0.17661020723263415,0.07371957324971362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732402799460696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034457825757328,0.058052076664130925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286521035263119,0.05291731226215462,0.2665921414576889,0.0,0.0,0.07215611447466345,0.0,0.0,0.07765461251131009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07847950946522594,0.0,0.16389878283514034,0.0,0.0,0.07260689928625039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12164956792602764,0.20846271827043106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579763348811653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054026461708963185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737909466136515,0.0,0.0,0.21581914599648394,0.0,0.057390336454620536,0.061350816141212336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781781135189796,0.0,0.060597151583434525,0.08901677086292725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07456289766121166,0.0,0.0,0.06592424013745618,0.0,0.06297988819296743,0.0,0.06058685891625671,0.061226976015089835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777523721595445,0.0,0.0,0.05556883521468409,0.07751638230811161,0.0,0.05422233571955943,0.0,0.0,0.0983074795720145
mentalhealth,TorNorTro,2020/04/10,"I told my parents a week ago. A week ago I ran out of meds. I don’t think they were working anyway but I made the next step to ask my parents for help(I’m 21). I’m pretty sure I’m bipolar or bpd but idk. I admitted to them that I think I need to go to a psych ward and they reassured me that they are here for me and tuneup would. Help. I thought I’d finally did it. I was gonna have help getting normal. I was gonna be happy for the first time in forever. I was gonna want to live again. Or so I thought. 
It’s been a week and no help. I thought it was finally time to get better. I thought things would change but no. I’m still lost. I don’t want to do this anymore.",-1.5483687696061352,0.335392622516558,1.02867898222377,101.84259323806208,92.97350993377485,4.503450679679331,18.54339491111886,6.05967700443912,-0.43302119205297984,510,16,134,5,19,173,82,151,0.067,0.7040000000000001,0.22899999999999998,0.9769,2,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,4,4,5,5,0,0,6,0,15,1,0,1,1,24,39,9,0,6,5,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,7,0,0,3,4,1,0,1,15,0,23,4,13,18,0,18,0,1,0,0,13,2,0,2,13,80,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22487641208744055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12579365742030554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858059712642685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121818665744874,0.0,0.0,0.15975366430976126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418252603555492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778994755380493,0.0,0.1078921494207447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13253992203648546,0.0,0.07208750495801469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13502617950024084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3400793647788821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11200423446004834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846355156889847,0.0,0.0,0.12002142231121204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14089340164339012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09405209234135263,0.0,0.0,0.13489841738960598,0.0,0.1242787000326465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816871283956263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12904440372812126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012965690627252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954753709005302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426850809721631,0.16255108011848046,0.0,0.4027950454362501,0.14792574125762573,0.0,0.0,0.12120342617541432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14962996317142585,0.0,0.30523616137260995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234283675165757,0.0,0.0,0.18021051822665285,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway772943,2020/04/10,"Need advice For months I’ve lost sleep staying up just feeling pretty unhappy about my life and considering suicide to be a big option these feelings started off happening on a night but recently I’m starting to get these thoughts through the day, I’ve only self harmed once where I came in after drinking and tried to slice the word fat into my leg, I don’t think I would follow through with it now but if something dramatic changes in my life I feel that could change very quickly. I don’t really think I have depression because I’ve never self harmed more than that one time and I’m not sure what’s wrong with me for feeling this way but I was hoping I maybe could get information here and see if I have anything wrong with me or something",5.993197278911568,6.427120700680272,5.790884353741497,82.63625850340135,66.48299319727892,8.710204081632652,32.65986394557823,8.515128840125781,2.423892517006803,601,24,117,8,9,187,99,147,0.147,0.752,0.10099999999999999,-0.8413,0,0,3,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,4,0,9,6,3,0,2,34,29,10,1,7,8,0,4,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,7,9,2,0,8,1,0,2,4,6,0,1,4,5,14,2,19,21,1,23,0,2,1,0,3,8,0,5,11,72,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283945584656898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186742551317552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828680499299883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15547968492416772,0.0,0.0,0.2876139884609314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21707481050615496,0.0,0.0,0.08767035831523119,0.0,0.11708532927114786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331699094056754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2749423486322927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14204657168666493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021171037058255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13501956173631502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19203755111218013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148395083547035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657047568725236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085063877406226,0.0,0.0,0.10079813743491647,0.10484567241073828,0.0,0.0,0.12757092403895542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477216598019185,0.09211678194161282,0.10338885460917796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830033142681006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870869472681467,0.0,0.13422481604253653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832695584983756,0.0,0.2836311194604991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13603864650534786,0.0,0.0,0.20930723347268507,0.0,0.0,0.19243873141673895,0.14489445561383812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869681225157722,0.0,0.12812228599736047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742103307442599,0.0,0.1079215500082373,0.0792679823822068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09229465706830324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11216512617382822,0.0,0.10790321910378846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09656821093091716,0.297259131508463,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angelbabykitten,2020/04/10,I don’t know why I should not kill myself I’m 20 years old and pregnant I don’t have a job a house or a car now and I feel like the most horrible mother ever but I feel like I can’t kill my self because it’s wrong but I also feel like bringing a baby into a world of pain is wrong. I have had severe trauma that makes it hard for me to connect with anyone. I don’t know why I exist and don’t feel like there’s a pourpose and want to make everyone else’s life better by going off into the forest and killing myself,0.8143965517241369,2.177358543103452,3.1753793103448267,92.95755172413791,79.94827586206897,5.329655172413793,18.49655172413793,5.6839178017228535,-0.35720413793103445,405,8,94,2,10,140,71,116,0.23199999999999998,0.58,0.188,-0.8258,1,0,0,0,0,2,2.0,0,0,0,1,4,12,3,0,8,0,10,2,0,2,1,24,22,9,3,2,4,1,5,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,6,0,0,3,6,7,0,0,1,5,14,5,9,20,1,11,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,8,58,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075710557458084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684128852884204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08442732781134278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224905634045558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156976259429667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527971516629305,0.0,0.1323411386539128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2801157722042505,0.39577308540710776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07871182185110898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406734588784492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15980853699719166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743827289746324,0.0,0.4596838163596023,0.0,0.15223017675345193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09782550267282374,0.2706532533316192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184897490095946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14533075335316628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14737204268097054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14448401718407047,0.15646374899507756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168993372427596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499464943526355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3028524764608709,0.0,0.08918841677950566
mentalhealth,potatthrowaway,2020/04/10,"Looking for advice after a friend's accident So to make a very long story short, I have a friend who was burned severely a while ago. He's family to me and has been for years. For those who might be concerned, he's almost to his complete recovery. There's still some superficial work to be done if he decides to, but he's perfectly fine beyond that. 

He spent a long time in a hospital far from home. I went to see him at least twice a week in that time, more if I could have the time off. I spent the day there, just waiting for each round of visiting hours. I saw pretty much every step of his recovery. I've even been his driver for a lot of his follow up appointments and surgeries.

I don't say all of that to brag, but to explain that I've been closely involved in the whole process. Now, to the problem. Since his accident and the hard times since then, fire is an absolute no-go for me. I can handle a candle or a lighter, little things, but beyond that I just can't take. Burns also just trigger this response I can't even explain. As a great example, Chicago Fire is essentially completely off limits now. I tried one episode and there's no way (which sucks because it's a good show!). Seeing him and him showing off his scars doesn't really affect me at all, but just about any other context I just feel sick to my stomach and start bawling. I don't even know how to handle it. Even my own problems in upbringing aren't a big deal at this point, but this is so absolute. Any advice or really anything you guys can offer, I'm more than willing to listen to.",4.740678233438487,5.109957602523664,5.518313880126183,83.72958438485807,69.18927444794953,8.737476340694007,28.783753943217665,8.697196308434329,1.9922808832807568,1228,41,254,19,20,401,176,317,0.107,0.8170000000000001,0.076,-0.7901,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,0,3,22,9,1,0,19,0,24,2,1,4,3,43,43,22,0,5,14,0,5,0,2,2,1,2,1,1,16,8,0,2,5,2,2,4,7,3,0,2,9,11,27,6,41,29,11,42,0,0,5,0,28,19,1,8,18,177,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338648136532085,0.10607322042509043,0.0,0.11982429531309087,0.0,0.0,0.09569372800891164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16274864555095708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984717020059168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294489777594959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.250926843808091,0.0,0.0,0.0955404397441656,0.0,0.0,0.07717214693344861,0.1233663576975478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12245586113283233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31614272049842485,0.0,0.10082046956306967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280676628619342,0.0,0.0605047467999013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18490126368043674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068006721846247,0.10036688152714368,0.0,0.13192787373088646,0.0,0.11848427970801476,0.0,0.0,0.10719372622268823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003083024702932,0.0,0.11784305193285385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576315376526354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993284786776212,0.0,0.2117943634900037,0.1004860156944209,0.0,0.0,0.10173242749530226,0.0,0.0,0.07987537248730985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12694256461935613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879654026873068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108612725721631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11311935073612896,0.0,0.0,0.1217393621164223,0.0,0.229000913723008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331719453906478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516009473312996,0.0,0.0,0.1907103818063098,0.0,0.0,0.13518409822932248,0.0,0.19797143039446136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469744131294914,0.0,0.09556229751938444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997099754524923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949817369741617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791037016877303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124270247461651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987337540787904,0.0,0.09498219511466248,0.09598570855413023,0.0,0.0,0.11092795380250453,0.0,0.13359844712979438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711542474831024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705846096796365
mentalhealth,-SpazzyJazzy-,2020/04/10,"One of the best things. One of the most beautiful feelings in the world is that moment. The moment when you smile for the first time and actually mean it in so long. I struggle with really heavy depressive episodes that are easily triggered and can last sometimes for a month or 2 at a time. It's so hard to push through, but when the time come, and I turn it around it's amazing. When the time comes after it's over, I smile and I actually mean it. I'm so proud of myself for fighting through something so hard. I rarely talk about it because none of my friends or family understand. If you're going through a rough time please hold on. Please wait until you smile your first real smile in a long time and you'll feel on top of the world.",3.239004474272928,4.862186765100674,3.6659228187919446,90.8951705816555,73.96644295302012,7.114317673378077,24.497203579418343,7.793537801064563,1.0416035794183434,584,18,126,8,12,182,84,149,0.084,0.6920000000000001,0.22399999999999998,0.9754,0,0,1,0,2,0,13.0,0,4,0,5,10,7,1,1,12,0,4,0,0,1,0,23,15,17,0,1,4,0,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,2,5,0,0,4,1,3,0,4,0,5,11,4,24,14,3,34,0,1,0,0,7,11,0,4,19,83,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.2643218559887128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12056212802755135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255736073200166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14212627275625198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333232905399079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11664635252343886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12767210841675125,0.0,0.13695576688311695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2303947443817097,0.0,0.0,0.10463350275954277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696844657876309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24263879705899535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039418048306147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23970399850795174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950476956155845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809957519209466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18354283472701333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2973247060619261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15414990385027824,0.08676044056472236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426124901105294,0.13394452752354669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14158168089815384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10885414974873517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997420797862615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4738247434243725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473098241697076,0.0,0.14098824256770404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,guizmole,2020/04/10,"having an older Schizophrenia brother..? Hi, I have an older Schizophrenia brother, i just wanna know if someones here dealing with the it and have any tips to helps or just talk about it, im abouut to leave home to escape it and i dont know if it the right moove.,,",1.3823270440251605,3.8143936792452853,2.326698113207545,94.1144496855346,83.90566037735849,3.5333333333333337,20.154088050314463,3.1291,-0.4593874213836475,207,6,41,0,6,65,35,53,0.024,0.8909999999999999,0.085,0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,0,11,6,5,0,3,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,6,6,0,3,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,3,2,29,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21565414990752446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269393352723457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37166516564959656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21256050276236346,0.0,0.3180996876746696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3425466792822067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34856442515941594,0.0,0.0,0.33578690018754026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27082085127068706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26869683439032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25489102393530794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,somedayhappy,2020/04/10,"I hate social media, but I don’t want to. Can anyone relate? Pretty much just ranting here: I didn’t used to feel this way, I think it has everything to do with my lack of confidence. I used to be all over Facebook a long time ago. I’ve always hated Instagram though, just think it’s stupid. The only socials i like are Snapchat and Reddit. I don’t want to hate socials though, especially now that we’re all on lockdown it would be nice to get on Facebook and try to talk to some old friends. But every time I get on there it just pisses me off and I end up deactivating it again. I’ve tried to get on Instagram but the shit I see on there makes me super mad and depressed and just makes me feel like I’m not good enough. I guess I just want to feel like I fit in. My boyfriend loves Instagram and Twitter, sometimes I get mad that I hate it so much. Sometimes I wish I could be “normal” and be on all that shit like most people my age. Anyone relate to me? Or have advice on how to stop being a hater? Lol",2.619768957345972,3.7472860568720354,3.8697126777251203,90.80703347156401,74.68720379146919,6.602014218009479,22.66617298578199,6.9077264865688965,0.4736940758293837,782,20,176,7,16,256,111,211,0.19,0.564,0.24600000000000002,0.9352,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,14,21,11,0,4,1,15,4,3,5,3,43,40,15,0,8,10,0,3,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,10,8,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,12,0,0,1,4,24,9,25,32,9,23,0,1,1,1,6,12,3,4,14,113,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10524341116606754,0.09546974918134336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961521298767365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15061299976091852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598986419472575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09276204401371826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539043020986536,0.11128312015361802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09074208271378896,0.0,0.09679401562993582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16336940590994614,0.1538821212608236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320892491121741,0.0,0.22507568483292734,0.0,0.0,0.09033383701475227,0.0,0.0,0.11864393755612378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4253266907585439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104675546896836,0.0,0.0,0.09531130797849384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720365590188433,0.0,0.14378146994255062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15834411169073145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055233513427514,0.0,0.0,0.11301326661672552,0.0,0.0,0.08191087253616999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07466577371107631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10956984543482773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582313351268793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211054618557853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3293604421613405,0.0,0.0,0.213036548314518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004220869033466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08656535941009437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801990794866922,0.21162984399623813,0.0,0.12560173194010654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1462427631966474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186036825596612,0.0,0.0,0.1905731453297342,0.08548742376209903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12384994095948534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07650714814966286,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sadudp,2020/04/10,"is not being able to do things something wrong with me terrible title but i dont know how to explain it. i have desires to do things. i know that i *should* do those things. but i dont. like there's something i want to buy. i know that i want it and it would make my life better if i had it. but i just dont buy it. even when i really really want it. or if i wanna learn something, i just dont learn it, no matter how much i want to. is this a mental health thing or is it just me being lazy?",-1.9027027027027048,-0.04066685585585361,1.0095135135135145,101.00508108108109,95.93693693693695,4.0410810810810815,12.805405405405404,5.6839178017228535,-1.241774054054054,373,6,96,3,15,129,54,111,0.09699999999999999,0.7759999999999999,0.127,0.0302,0,0,3,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,8,4,0,0,1,0,16,2,0,3,0,31,25,11,0,10,11,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,16,2,0,0,6,0,2,0,6,2,0,0,1,0,17,2,7,20,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,2,76,33,2,0.13855967008448367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12254476825757075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6495636056017569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151735530343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14728244995752596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22844631309002905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097868792676936,0.0676932558840024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248965571486406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396355578629517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018573003920698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17752974535849356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200100103321199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3682115518849142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269043334923671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842881415686952,0.151493247775969,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,random-guy-57643,2020/04/10,I lost a friend I had a very good friend who also had mental health problems I was talking with them and the they told me they couldn’t take it anymore and I was never able to contact them again they helped me so much and now their gone and I feel like I failed as a friend and I don’t know if I can survive this and I miss them so much and I wish I could’ve helped them more but now I’ll never be able to what do I do?,-0.5865624999999994,1.1454301354166674,1.06025,104.55975,86.1875,3.84,14.808333333333335,3.1291,-1.557796666666667,327,5,87,0,10,105,55,96,0.081,0.778,0.141,0.6344,0,0,0,0,0,1,1.0,0,0,8,3,6,9,0,0,4,0,10,1,0,0,2,17,18,13,0,4,2,0,1,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,4,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,4,4,0,0,7,1,22,5,4,9,3,6,0,3,0,0,17,0,0,1,6,64,26,1,0.3755495444785457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15016341751858986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862221174749012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14992287626078016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494456684479917,0.1341463348069101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4352229697098005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15749657004057532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19959580214613645,0.0,0.0,0.25172294341932383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031961040881681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917372688460002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20497834545108992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892328053194157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760721264761429,0.0,0.28964696059689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17967509749606692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14118325986519312,0.15092624914397249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17942684178570642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15493385246241487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2159317211075759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,frogpurpose,2020/04/10,"What is this feeling? Is this depersonalization? Sometimes when I see myself in a mirror or a video call I get scared. This morning after turning the lights on, I saw myself in the mirror and had an unexplained panic attack shortly after. It’s almost like I get shocked I have a physical body and it doesn’t feel like it’s mine or it’s me. This feeling is so scary and I had never experienced it so much until recently and now it’s super frequent. I’ve been  with generalized anxiety and PTSD, and I’ve heard about depersonalization but everytime I hear about it it’s hard to wrap my brain around",1.7528205128205132,4.4781654786324765,3.790461538461543,81.7795384615385,86.52136752136751,6.196923076923077,22.32991452991452,7.554174236665415,1.3147155555555554,479,17,89,9,15,162,72,117,0.122,0.802,0.076,-0.605,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,1,2,6,0,8,2,2,0,1,17,18,13,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,13,8,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,10,12,3,11,13,1,13,0,0,2,0,3,5,0,3,10,65,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098037217333805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16028200255146907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18651696019355066,0.0,0.23835891422289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23272916189730936,0.0,0.23389328559784645,0.2139430467910136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178183780172408,0.14968092071022773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189307988429357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18768850381490249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361439374784416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047214914082569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15402109246167384,0.0,0.1615945146972002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24582623289340505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24491732560770074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20687543424532584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20976577794721968,0.0,0.16696008005559482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20722034785703275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278972763694203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chrszn,2020/04/10,"Hi there, my friend and I want to build an App that help people with mental and emotional issues.  

Hi [r/](https://www.reddit.com/r/Depression/)anxiety

Depression, anxiety and mental issues has always been something that haunted my life when I was   in my 20s. I struggled with relationship problems, video game addiction, social isolation and more... While many are still struggling to cope, I have been fortunate enough to walk out of it alive.

During  the pandemic, my friend and I came up with an idea. We want to build a platform to connect those who want to talk to those who are willing to talk. Currently I am going through a tough break up which is causing   strong feelings of anxiety that has been dragging me down for days. With the app, I would specify the issues I am facing, and an algorithm will  connect me to someone else who has experience with break ups. And we  will extend this to all other issues, for example addiction to video  games, lack of social support.

What  we are trying to build is a platform that helps those looking for help  with those who are willing to help (The services would be free of  course). So my question for you are the  following:

1. If you are going through something right now, do you feel this can be something you are willing to try to receive help from?
2. If you been through a tough time, is this an app you are willing to help others with?

Thanks for your time.",6.531723666210668,7.6834206356589165,5.924947560419517,79.61460328317375,65.51162790697674,8.861285909712722,32.61833105335157,9.007467420416297,2.765180300957592,1116,45,198,18,17,341,130,258,0.091,0.743,0.166,0.9621,1,2,3,0,0,0,45.0,3,7,0,1,5,12,0,2,13,0,34,4,1,1,1,34,46,12,0,9,2,0,2,0,2,8,3,0,0,0,20,19,0,0,4,4,1,6,0,6,0,0,6,3,25,7,42,30,4,25,0,1,1,0,33,9,0,3,8,153,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22146591778465652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451946503596608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23311635057236704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617601573577707,0.0,0.10434665085838003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655081911965486,0.0,0.08748735928084675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485381038419627,0.11425945795930124,0.0,0.10495528012872822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09936093170756337,0.0,0.0,0.10271987184922488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15695490944559395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545609431331046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40850597378272746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466707030466555,0.0,0.4240762963471241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07174621421039698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529835426719735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10298223792884406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204729666562742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07042008873453989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09719462420352264,0.0,0.0,0.11378849594013148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905473404956076,0.0,0.08674544747751388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20708811556593412,0.08606511288040754,0.2345947683910718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811188169026821,0.0,0.0,0.21237882053507035,0.0,0.0,0.1152673719293236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632860677124914,0.0,0.09351763980160976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11845969938863835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792702933666234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797366736795688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431351591891742,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MarsFaun,2020/04/10,"I feel like an idiot. I feel like everyone around me views me as an idiot and doesn't take me seriously. And I have evidence to back it up. In middle school and high school I was treated as the lowest of the low by my ""friends"". They would tell me to shut up and call me a mess.

Today I had to schedule an appointment with a new psychiatrist so I called the clinic. Apparently they're doing appointments on Zoom. Well I stammered and stuttered all throughout the call. And when I gave the receptionist my email she laughed. That made me feel even more nervous and I've been thinking about it the entire day. I even want to change my email now, because her laughing at it makes me think that maybe it sounds stupid? It's firstname lastname.email@xxx.com.

Anyways I know that maybe I'm over reacting. Maybe she didn't laugh because she thought it was dumb, but for some other reason. But I just over analyze every interaction I have and think I come off like a complete moron.",3.9338034759358287,6.036030465240646,4.238713235294121,85.48983455882356,73.22459893048128,7.241844919786098,26.660762032085557,8.07648339933343,1.6398986631016044,775,28,150,12,16,242,116,187,0.133,0.7859999999999999,0.08,-0.8316,2,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,0,11,20,5,1,12,0,10,1,0,4,1,30,25,14,0,2,3,0,3,3,1,1,1,1,0,0,10,11,0,0,9,0,0,1,2,11,1,0,8,5,28,9,20,16,3,21,0,1,1,0,14,13,1,1,10,102,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12317833343149145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10639772745606374,0.0,0.16869772081571907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42387268040867226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463767530703027,0.11919320996428355,0.14507795586994304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923698363465893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827837108099604,0.0,0.11658240634664473,0.13221813978857636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20989157284913296,0.1977026254389341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690405604050457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619514276402745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604434643207786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028012795976591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309287178878988,0.09236282247802732,0.0,0.4170327647137134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336382798205327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226705586813404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28007496615622457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10403676396955933,0.0,0.1209411816903698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2659850729316545,0.0,0.10985005396332398,0.0,0.0,0.13115825849773452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161401047577065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441094182772515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829383641259068,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,some-reference_,2020/04/10,"Overthinking and bodyimage issues during social distancing Now that I am constantly home because of covid-19 I am really obsessing over my flaws. I think I'm average looking but there just are so many little things to hate. Normally I'm distracted during the day because I'll be at my college, and my fellow students are really nice, but now it's just me and my thoughts. It has come to a point where I will literally waste an entire day that I should be studying just overthinking and feeling sad/empty, googling what type of plastic surgery I ""should"" have. Does anyone have the same struggles? advice?",5.576383838383837,7.863575709090912,5.696666666666665,75.98944444444443,69.18181818181819,9.252525252525249,33.13131313131313,9.725611199111238,3.6429191919191934,488,23,79,12,9,154,76,110,0.149,0.8,0.052000000000000005,-0.9005,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,1,3,4,0,12,0,0,0,0,17,20,7,0,3,5,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,6,5,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,2,11,1,6,14,1,11,0,0,1,0,2,5,0,0,5,54,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21612799591403306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15464951884523925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696503902780024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19052122002564795,0.0,0.2390097716956728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28527697170968946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19355025148553345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183186957350363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183628510894136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22185486036951796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23084746996140226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22167375800584802,0.0,0.0,0.18572987402565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22423501885497948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21670288139799965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20908026472036773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2833785679621445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254583335558061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312183624324853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469377174928643,0.14171892458956584,0.0,0.17558690052266476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dr_voltz,2020/04/10,"I live in a city/country where my mental health isn't considered I'm 23, i live in morocco and i've been thinking recently that i might have ADHD, there is no way i can seek ""professional help"",  the psys know nothing about it according to many that i've asked and if i ever find one i'll probably get scammed into paying for multiple sessions, i can't just stand like this, add to the fact that i feel down most of the time due to parents not helping me and not wanting to believe in such a thing.

I lowkey believe it won't work but i want to give it a try and ask if there is an online free service that i can resort too.
Thanks!",5.599699248120299,4.525626714285714,6.459097744360904,82.59511278195491,67.57142857142857,9.705263157894738,32.53383458646616,8.841846274778883,2.395634586466165,495,18,109,7,7,165,91,133,0.049,0.879,0.071,0.7691,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,7,0,10,1,0,0,2,22,21,7,0,4,6,1,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,9,6,0,0,4,0,2,0,6,0,0,1,1,1,12,4,13,18,1,12,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,4,5,70,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102361631797877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32707855786280743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3941804706384239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15823743430732493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845167201206534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988611895080826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09139557315756128,0.1678122258790353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18594621064809488,0.0,0.0,0.2345085766269663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613891826638632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0854637088240458,0.0,0.308939104452832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17735518879386775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17629189943429432,0.18557687923586208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1678534838162252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11853951817373093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942430337610941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886079818267785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727258018058525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16105533338702022,0.0,0.0,0.11621809456863184,0.11209037176526723,0.0,0.0,0.1020051747372849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187684149216258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063607105764356,0.1388541298594745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735372651855914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tommytwotone48,2020/04/10,"Losing sensitivity for mental illness after living with one with no support This is going to be an unpopular opinion and that’s why I want to hear what you have to say. I have been living alone with multiple illnesses for a long time now. I have had to suffer through many things without support and find a way to survive by myself. I feel so many emotions that sometimes I shut off, I am angry and I have lost my relationship with my unstable family. Sometimes I am agitated by people who preach about their illness and how hard life is for them because I remain silent and see their life as much easier than my own. I have accepted my downfall or success but that is up to me to make happen. I lose sensitivity to what others are going through at these times, I am selfish I am negative and I get very agitated by people crying over things I may consider minor in comparison. I realize that life is not a competition but it makes it very hard to be around other people who suffer when they seem to be the only people that I relate to.",7.011521152115215,6.631358603960397,8.103501350135016,69.6721467146715,64.44554455445544,10.711791179117911,33.710171017101715,10.230975488527342,3.4184693069306933,826,31,148,17,11,283,120,202,0.22699999999999998,0.7240000000000001,0.049,-0.9885,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,4,5,6,10,0,0,5,0,20,6,0,3,0,27,34,13,0,1,5,0,3,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,17,11,0,0,5,0,0,2,4,6,0,1,3,6,28,4,34,27,2,16,1,5,1,0,10,7,0,4,6,123,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12829918929092182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11027677337005007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551425566569211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607304290815667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13934492623984182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167801895661056,0.0,0.06263592188269723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322131316369476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472060788110906,0.0,0.14080428205566162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954400204425788,0.0,0.22193887974457194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396183566845511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26249391793973104,0.0,0.0,0.2187712812300312,0.10962722685732397,0.0,0.2771733025136909,0.13522635428213856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1653776887295277,0.2511836237367771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483885708811195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106383188948644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394224587783472,0.09421402345700933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34352279437603545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132997514110862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985119445217498,0.0,0.0,0.09871391261700868,0.11277294777166574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450349964376387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28114825199106397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16459671879947702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14446732348041846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044229596767652,0.07306585083863866,0.0983277786968412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177970431247383,0.0,0.0,0.1194129856963441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mystic_Mushrooms,2020/04/10,"Today I found out my mum has cancer and I feel completely done with life. The past year has just been rediculous. 
I've been homeless, I've lost friends due to my sexual preferences after being honest with them, I've been trying to keep my head above water with my last year of university, corona virus hits and just when I thought things couldn't get any worse i find out today that my mum has cancer. 
Honestly it's my final straw I feel completely numb and like giving up. I've tried to stay positive throughout it all but I'm just not sure I can stay strong anymore. 
Every single god damn time I pick myself up something comes crashing down and wipes all the happiness away. 

I'm trying to stay positive when I speak to my mum but I don't know how long I can keep it up. 

I came off my meds in January becuase I was having some negitive side effects but now I guess I'm going to have to go back on them. 
I can't even go and see my mum and give her a hug as we are not isolating together. 

I just can't cope anymore.",2.047418308805192,3.911812270142178,3.6168820154652046,88.91102519331507,77.95734597156398,6.906560239461213,22.005737091544027,7.85451343220497,0.9376767772511854,803,23,171,13,19,266,125,211,0.069,0.768,0.163,0.9639,0,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,2,3,10,11,1,0,3,0,18,7,1,3,3,41,40,13,0,2,9,4,2,1,1,0,4,1,0,0,5,14,1,2,8,0,0,5,6,3,0,0,9,4,29,8,23,28,4,34,0,1,1,1,12,11,1,2,16,103,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580881359615279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502793951419677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11855314656820393,0.09702699087675072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443198148351459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10869554051848383,0.26460109322209724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291290889227531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334272669733575,0.0,0.1063146774601611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12760390164253804,0.0,0.0,0.13822738378522156,0.11532903862927038,0.0,0.0,0.13835322165732095,0.09748872572878003,0.0,0.0659254452881909,0.2420925945024857,0.21513823719151814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139004875980944,0.0,0.0,0.1343242228053542,0.0,0.0,0.12950023211881587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22431461812670805,0.0,0.0,0.06934691448687694,0.10285604227451987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912683297313756,0.06164667352643416,0.0,0.0,0.11166804489158884,0.0,0.0,0.13774372510723518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14016094319040726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12045601681521854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055156863437584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714189089451636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4034830855560467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189260487658764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383042384091959,0.0,0.0,0.10017526162023843,0.07357836199202042,0.0,0.2392135895181648,0.0,0.0,0.2570100619550529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12859132694415035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625155181063815
mentalhealth,daybydaydoingmybest,2020/04/10,"I cannot open up to adults. I've been emotionally abused my entire life (19M), and even two years into therapy there are a LOT of things I cannot and will not talk about. I'm really not comfortable with him, as he will often side with my parents, try to rationalize why they are being that way toward me, tell me to respect them and be patient with them even though I know very well they will never change, and all my efforts in trying to please them will never be enough because we are fundamentally different. I know all of this but I honestly think I'm not making any progress by going, and will be a lot better off by just having my own processes and seeking help by myself when I need it. But for the life of me, I am incapable of confronting an adult on anything that's a sensitive matter. I cannot tell my parents I don't wanna go anymore, and I am not going to tell my therapist that. I know this is not working but I just feel trapped in a loophole. Has anyone experienced this? Or have any advice?",6.1747860962566845,5.489105872549021,6.971158645276294,78.11430481283425,66.25490196078431,9.967201426024957,31.29055258467023,9.339509955726095,2.5311921568627453,794,26,161,13,11,265,121,204,0.085,0.8240000000000001,0.091,-0.1158,3,1,0,0,1,0,19.0,1,0,5,4,10,6,1,0,6,0,23,2,0,1,4,40,35,14,0,2,11,2,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,8,13,0,0,5,0,0,3,11,1,1,1,1,2,29,5,26,25,6,17,0,0,0,0,17,9,0,4,4,126,37,1,0.0,0.16182080271990396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346096141114872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18575338773110053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354471748837803,0.09549745455034347,0.0,0.11239081088093816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325575818902275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079080306834912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444798127584409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14269335901338512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363016402162866,0.0,0.14112001920100045,0.0,0.18041496179678496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690571749697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23285869314602234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154433963562998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22517659471311915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19293602217157932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322248886973895,0.0,0.0,0.09116586491747974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10126973379095268,0.21067241130372172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033040498602556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991996844394406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749439415193949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977500599579347,0.35812160576516355,0.0,0.15618711446326333,0.1585758268406636,0.09073534856612317,0.08751269749153989,0.13418570402693228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18545293771264976,0.0,0.1334153814512157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11268990437037052,0.0,0.10840805744930627,0.0,0.0,0.12279866306187252,0.0,0.12323903547271348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942930840285093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795077912745093
mentalhealth,Trav_s616,2020/04/10,"What’s wrong with me? I like to think that I’m a decent guy I guess. I try to do everything I can to please the people around me. Most of the things I do are to make other people happy rather than myself. I’m still left with nothing. I’ve been in the deepest depression I think I’ve ever been in for well over a month and not a single person has noticed. My roommates don’t care about how I am, they just care if rent gets paid. None of my “friends” respond when I try to talk about things. All of my exes are in happy long term relationships while I’m left with nothing. I can’t keep anyone in my life and I can’t get a single person to give a fuck about me. If I didn’t have 7 reptiles relying on me for their entire existence I would be long gone by now. It’s hard to stop myself from rehoming all of my animals to make sure they’re safe when I die. I’m honestly pretty scared of death, and I really don’t want to die, but I feel like death will feel less alone than life itself. What’s so fucking wrong with me?",2.4686815068493138,3.3285355570776254,3.972782534246576,90.95862585616442,74.70776255707763,7.118835616438358,21.450057077625576,7.413659706084162,0.4681618721461187,793,17,184,9,16,264,121,219,0.151,0.728,0.121,-0.8540000000000001,1,1,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,2,0,14,17,2,1,8,0,18,4,0,3,4,32,40,11,4,5,6,0,3,2,1,2,2,0,1,3,8,8,0,3,4,0,2,1,7,6,1,0,5,3,29,11,34,32,8,21,0,1,0,2,10,9,2,4,13,122,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238643420208616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262582921498997,0.0,0.0,0.10519459353300037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409603498396331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177794504428543,0.0,0.2452795030687075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10688974203755873,0.0,0.0,0.10620179954144182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11949860594678205,0.08441925923207337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912963214302989,0.21848886623225533,0.12347582960948357,0.11335753523481062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301753996994613,0.11700492110595408,0.0,0.2515841155874787,0.10585533803004986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503316832238056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567798054578696,0.0,0.16693113855683492,0.11546185426683718,0.0,0.0,0.2091499636230422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15775614586538594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432058855848788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267708101279712,0.13453507738160533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384565679322755,0.20635951943598185,0.0,0.1297130040469906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202193615475694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0757014613898017,0.0,0.0,0.1268682335385713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830680558697197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943691358002402,0.09879375842985608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137196320291592,0.0,0.0,0.09497898075075246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15701116746383714,0.151434595427194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16045666170908907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0696985615848722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624724407319694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394317312283281,0.2583963656156848,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lewisye,2020/04/11,"Just looking for somekind of help, thanks First of all i just wanted to let everyone know i have never been good at explaining or writing things or explaining how i feel . so sorry if this doesnt make sense,


For as long as i can remember i have struggled with my mental state, from a young age i was pretty much dragged up and went through some shit, 

I used to be in a life that was pretty much hostile 24/7, did alot of bad things throughout my young and teenage years, i have struggled with anxeity and depression for as long as i remember too but only realised it not so long back as i just thought it was just how life was, 

Forward many years, alot has changed i have a job a wife a home, steady life,


But i am constanly on edge, i never feel safe, i feel like i allways look behind my shoulder, even at home i am allways on guard. I can NEVER relax, i think of the worst case all the time, allways feel i have to stay ready for the worst in any way shape or form, i dont sleep, i hear the slighest noise and im up and alert all the time, its so draining, i allways need to be out the house thinking it will be nice to get out to no where but after 5 mins of leaving the house i want to go back, and the the same cycle keeps going and going, i feel like ive gone insane,


Sorry if this is long winded, i just need to get it off my chest as i can not explain this in real life to anyone, 


If anyone feels the same can you please tell me any coping you use or just to feel like im not.alone with this feeling would be a help


Thanks",5.417855316039457,4.330497950310562,5.685878699305808,88.03392948483744,67.94409937888199,8.57025940811107,29.50018268176836,7.048011613610866,1.3698218487394955,1188,34,273,8,17,379,160,322,0.124,0.753,0.12300000000000001,0.1645,1,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,0,1,16,17,2,2,18,0,29,8,4,5,6,73,64,28,0,8,18,1,8,3,0,2,4,1,2,0,12,12,0,3,17,1,0,6,8,8,0,1,9,11,34,9,44,48,13,42,0,1,2,0,11,15,1,10,23,187,46,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08739923640726599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477178471829555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180103730938539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977642321429014,0.0704594219897511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08927000561656563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268219503219746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09890065736624347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05573666087122794,0.0,0.0,0.08063516804385733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413478619447677,0.18085776033234136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07177933721579446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08817720111694045,0.0,0.14387682575257968,0.07077961282248145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511001456912943,0.0,0.11312533643853355,0.0,0.16929360686270012,0.0,0.0,0.19474198826882386,0.0,0.0,0.18230436904368946,0.0,0.08374084085619138,0.07500683199621666,0.0,0.0,0.04637675785743957,0.0,0.0,0.0893533971780144,0.0,0.08629118220539167,0.2384194643398509,0.12368132909762378,0.0,0.0,0.2987185178559563,0.14172725458250698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056328819354363485,0.08555493231849166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504200879022092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12406796045162398,0.12514343051400842,0.1952528209437334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417993562163138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926313245394508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17170335044286308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605061052885557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.191187503771572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08662179920760307,0.0,0.0,0.0844477057780659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18892814392001472,0.0,0.08994506098727921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.176438733340731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0737577500683324,0.15538398668982226,0.0,0.0,0.11212563086112713,0.10814326025812432,0.0,0.06699366346496381,0.09841319986332504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14576613727037105,0.0,0.0,0.09954699801358866,0.06698228432480542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822737442737028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05994593502433676,0.0,0.0,0.10868461685807616
mentalhealth,RyBread109,2020/04/11,"I don't feel connected to anyone anymore This has been a problem for a while but it's certainly became a lot more prevalent in the weeks following the Coronavirus lockdown happening in my country (the UK, Scotland specifically) and it's made me realise how... detached I feel about people now. I don't think it's a sign that I'm some psychopath in hiding but for the past three-ish years I've just felt... apathetic to friendships. They don't last forever and while that isn't the golden rule - good, long lasting friendships do exist - I've just... not had a consistent group of friends for as long as I've been out of high school. 

I know this is only really a ramble and nothing more but I don't know what to do besides wrap myself up in my duvet, weld a pair of headphones to my head and drown out the world for the coming weeks",6.519575757575757,6.0334774424242426,6.792727272727273,79.01575757575759,65.48484848484848,9.757575757575758,33.484848484848484,9.150863307647796,2.771666666666665,658,25,129,10,9,213,98,165,0.08800000000000001,0.802,0.11,0.6858,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,0,14,0,12,1,1,2,1,26,23,12,1,1,6,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,8,7,0,0,6,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,5,3,11,3,21,18,4,22,0,0,0,0,3,9,0,2,11,84,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19574851848354166,0.13801310557580054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700259105244512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19960312502016228,0.0,0.18951633041151936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15249576274093427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16555348349444673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17454301364157834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025694409733874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20854344194735866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21695043276752407,0.3217830677734713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34935124143292723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167805928608419,0.0,0.18676629716877013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18939201008359474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501168414026074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842211777467885,0.13683885622679887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18886657836430912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12644706724634788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19975970590139466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647351926805414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31665362468238883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12710663569353894
mentalhealth,Ross_R3d,2020/04/11,"Attempting to get my life together, How should I start? Been dealing with depression for years now. Grow up in a dysfunctional family. Dealt with domestic violence in my family and was bullied during school and college due to poor hygiene. Feel like lashing out at people at work and home. Never dated due to lack of confidence. 

Friends from church no longer talk to me due to amount of baggage I carry. What steps do I need to take in order to get life put back together?",4.194545454545455,6.632443000000002,4.925000000000002,79.34500000000003,73.54545454545455,8.945454545454545,28.04545454545455,9.516144504307137,2.921359090909091,376,15,66,10,8,121,66,88,0.191,0.723,0.086,-0.8992,0,0,0,0,1,0,9.0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,1,12,10,4,0,3,0,0,1,1,1,1,2,0,1,0,1,6,0,0,1,0,1,3,2,1,0,0,2,1,6,2,20,7,2,20,1,1,0,0,3,7,0,0,10,41,7,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18142615019397804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432476062849588,0.2032179729682587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44485346546644094,0.0,0.11930022984091115,0.1685582346269542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822895262077769,0.0,0.2465417020641864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366707802913961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33330804220936905,0.11527017945318885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17494927243243738,0.1819743357638118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635736614582111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23718859813040855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387876324539704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700217338300472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17740030747772334,0.18964261790077186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717698320353762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15194001447635086
mentalhealth,uselesslesbian31,2020/04/11,"Am I depressed? Disclaimer: I know self diagnosing or looking for online diagnosis is really bad. I am saving up the money to see a therapist, and I cannot in any way talk about it to my family or friends. Maybe some of you guys could just recognise some symptoms and share a bit. But I know I still need to see a therapist. I just needed to talk to someone.

My dad has been suffering from severe depression, so I can kinda recognise it.

So I’ve been feeling really really low for months. 
In August, my life was perfect. My partner loved me, we had a wonderful relationship, my family was great, things were perfect. But I still couldn’t help myself from sobbing and crying my eyes out every single night. And I couldn’t spot any reason, so I just kept asking myself ‘what’s wrong with me?’

In October, I started spending whole days in my bed in the darkness (on my sister’s 18th birthday as well). I once started sobbing loudly as I was making out with my partner, they got very scared of course and asked me what was wrong and it was so frustrating because there was literally nothing wrong, and they wouldn’t believe me.

Now things have been falling apart. I got broken up with while I was madly in love, my health is not at its best, neither is my family’s, we’ve been struggling a lot, and also I‘ve been in quarantine for over a month. And of course, this affects my mental health. But sometimes, the feeling of emptiness is the same I felt in August. It’s not due to any of these external causes. I can feel the difference, sometimes I cry over my ex and sometimes over... nothing. 

It’s the worst pain I’ve ever felt. I sob so hard my whole body shakes, I wanna rip my face off, I wanna scream out loud ‘I cant do this anymore’. I’m not suicidal in any way and I am completely safe. But still, I don’t know how I manage.

I’ve started losing interest in my biggest hobbies. I had been working on my biggest dream, it was the only thing that made me feel really alive, and now I don’t really feel anything. 

I sometimes have trouble keeping up with my hygiene. I can’t get myself to shower or change my clothes. 

The worst part is that my job is to be the ‘fun one’ of the family. And during this hard time, everyone really relies on me being positive, fun and making jokes to make them realise it’s going to be okay. And so I keep suppressing my feelings and faking being okay.

A few days ago I actually spent the day in my bed and my family had devastating consequences. They were really not used to see me sad and things got dark. It was a horrible experience and I don’t think I’ll feel my feelings for a long time now.

I’m sorry but I needed to talk to someone. Thank you for reading. I hope things will get a bit better. I’m losing my faith.",2.7426844262295056,4.6497789890710415,4.346034836065574,84.27511782786887,76.04918032786884,7.270810564663023,25.09870218579235,8.144726394080802,1.5997543715846998,2151,75,422,37,48,720,245,549,0.126,0.764,0.11,-0.2177,2,1,0,0,0,0,68.0,1,2,4,7,21,46,2,3,21,2,50,11,3,9,3,90,99,38,1,10,15,3,12,0,3,2,6,3,3,4,22,27,0,5,16,3,3,3,14,25,1,1,28,20,75,21,60,62,15,58,1,10,5,2,25,29,3,9,24,294,97,4,0.0,0.0,0.060324536218344285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054797096474919066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04943508290532346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681508904071835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061305915703716324,0.0,0.0,0.0508701756507748,0.0,0.11558121833184885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051614665460819886,0.03768310780763599,0.0,0.0,0.06964666124356679,0.064873193753822,0.05467216866683555,0.1349764445197379,0.06866482127552198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350315194089146,0.06539425594854817,0.0,0.06481401438174156,0.0,0.0,0.049355894663483516,0.0,0.13580628188462054,0.11960067480958278,0.0,0.10648589147071401,0.06274301765288362,0.0,0.0645856736891031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05591707252976797,0.05208354168143433,0.05906885275848674,0.0,0.0604689493271571,0.2913781268465205,0.0,0.25005251536988315,0.0,0.118708149279435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047759709489477865,0.0,0.06459372796989919,0.0,0.03513206144790813,0.0,0.1483222570061511,0.06815353013315623,0.0,0.061208611182937425,0.0,0.0,0.11075189258496956,0.0,0.0,0.13141729443427566,0.0,0.0,0.04143467424602863,0.0,0.0,0.06139829168597453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134389644622381,0.10989169174063844,0.0,0.0,0.10191912342045807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04366321970764705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05470615543911874,0.05191076385086304,0.13831496249213787,0.0,0.05255465631897762,0.11158462561900788,0.05849279963509173,0.12379010860469444,0.0,0.062103548508874465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062297059922828114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868357975121984,0.0,0.0,0.13750970668350332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058011125973655174,0.0,0.11863027822730085,0.0,0.0,0.06583315454853386,0.041888841691472174,0.047014661955207496,0.06577771340327135,0.0,0.0,0.06694185514346626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06183379152277661,0.0,0.2772111540842629,0.06355823632745046,0.0,0.06636839121575502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06188966408439245,0.0,0.14778058706140335,0.0,0.06448867845484715,0.06983568560340334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047547936631369,0.0,0.24455462365361866,0.06919914093237682,0.13126330597501076,0.0,0.14810155896697888,0.0,0.0,0.06462461611619026,0.0,0.06761783354938401,0.0,0.0,0.06425159773324142,0.0,0.14905864082571493,0.0,0.05691284617783447,0.0,0.1435487492637987,0.20534254905334992,0.03960987787323448,0.0,0.0,0.07209205304881998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05339009459813998,0.0,0.05100555093834653,0.0,0.09813501444077244,0.0,0.0,0.0555809635207218,0.0,0.0,0.1380330863328641,0.0,0.0,0.06703796782733695,0.04500355806353503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20276176238432275,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xcbanh,2020/04/11,"mental health has been going downhill ever since the quarantine  

My mental health has been going downhill ever since quarantine have started. I’m not a depressed type of person. I am usually very happy but that’s because I keep myself so busy during school. I avoid things that make me sad or frustrated. Now that I am in quarantine and have nothing else to do, I am stuck with my own negative thoughts and it only gets worse during night time. I don’t know what to do. I feel trapped and broken up to pieces again. The last time I have felt this way was when I broke up with my ex. It took me months to get over him. I don’t want to feel this way again and I am scared. I rather be outside risking my life than be in quarantine but I can’t risk infecting my family members. I tried finding new hobbies within my own home but it is not enough. I need to go outside and socialize.",1.9275141242937863,4.211431610169491,3.111666666666668,90.2677259887006,80.35593220338983,6.193220338983053,22.82768361581921,7.3871296695380915,0.9428056497175143,693,23,141,10,18,223,106,177,0.235,0.735,0.03,-0.992,0,6,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,8,9,1,4,3,0,20,4,0,1,2,27,38,11,0,3,7,1,3,0,0,0,4,0,1,1,10,7,0,2,6,0,0,4,6,8,0,0,7,3,25,1,16,29,4,26,0,3,0,0,4,6,0,1,14,98,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732123862129376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337729661765308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966338701916927,0.0,0.0,0.148011082223462,0.0,0.0,0.25914784196151863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350392811191376,0.0,0.14485864245811847,0.0,0.13753831932382746,0.0,0.1309239588820438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14967991393627972,0.0,0.2442294677454202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15248769288680525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30452692449997026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368709929659515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273233445336675,0.0,0.0,0.07872408101884758,0.11676435015475163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10117866197577327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09561760552948156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887159128538753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433733729511535,0.0,0.0,0.10621485866956673,0.0,0.1383475729810881,0.0,0.13442636949410522,0.0,0.13744809591709825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894479659817853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12507660489829767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14341391780350565,0.14497227842392774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369886179945169,0.0,0.0,0.14602093416804404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10139003150319756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0951660665384868,0.0,0.0,0.11372107137323713,0.16705541907823598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15915122418235145,0.097254415666119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776488190678808,0.11819269013675655,0.08449001502966938,0.2274035107940421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14597958850192405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AGLAECA9,2020/04/11,"Scared of attachment or any kind of relationship Never seen any healthy relationship ever in my life. Grew up in a very dysfunctional family with parents having toxic relationship.They hate each other and me, then my sibling hate me,my relatives and cousins everyone hate us. People just talk to me whenever they need some help or something.Never seen any kind of affection just hatred and bitterness all my life.Been ill treated,beaten and hated all my life at home and bullied by others at school and college.This created a big trust,commitment issue in me.Scared of any kind of relationship. My biggest fear is - ""becoming just like them"".
Any advice to overcome my fear?",5.96125,8.437912625000006,6.396666666666667,70.57500000000002,68.58333333333334,9.8,32.0,10.125756701596842,3.85515,545,24,84,15,10,176,75,120,0.278,0.636,0.086,-0.9836,1,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,2,0,4,12,5,3,2,0,2,3,0,1,4,20,9,9,0,1,5,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,8,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,8,0,0,2,3,11,4,15,7,4,12,0,0,2,0,10,8,0,3,4,50,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10914979587369206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3797916660295152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12336144270388795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10103705348998407,0.0,0.10673203309372144,0.0,0.0,0.10529874350031686,0.25138215411651865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4411138042900693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486867979197892,0.0,0.11204199909645786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116583481550755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34894820560043793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366863749598785,0.05456990223398623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282250221031492,0.08614822809188473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12402718660149535,0.0,0.0,0.07743718935958338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4796865350732091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118289820562939,0.11304413526127916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08977845933210299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435869851135254,0.0,0.0,0.0921623816357757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,supercoolmelly,2020/04/11,"Can anyone relate to these feelings?? hello everyone. I know the title is really vague but what I mean by it is for a year or two now I’ve noticed my mood swings and self image have been shifting pretty rapidly. I’ve always had issues with these things but it’s the speed at which they can change that concerns me sometimes. Little things can make my mood change from happy to sad or calm to angry. And the same can be said about my self image/identity. I can go from thinking to myself as the most beautiful girl in the world to a hideous monster within seconds. I feel like that about my friends and family too. Little things they say or do can make me think they don’t deserve me and that I’m too good for them or that they’re too good for me and I don’t deserve them. I have anxiety so I worry too much about these things but these feelings are really starting to annoy me. I also have adhd/autism/OCD so I figured these feelings have to be accredited to one of those but i guess I just want to know if any of you guys with similar diagnoses have these feelings too?

TLDR - rapid change in mood swings/self image have been getting really annoying and I want to know if any of you guys with similar diagnoses (adhd/autism/ocd) have dealt with similar feelings?",2.620401726427623,4.866111669322713,3.62659860557769,87.68911437583004,77.72509960159363,6.573771580345286,22.80893094289509,7.645422480735847,1.0784142098273568,1003,31,196,15,24,322,123,251,0.094,0.768,0.138,0.9137,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,2,5,0,13,12,2,0,7,0,24,2,0,2,0,41,46,20,0,4,11,0,6,1,1,0,2,2,0,5,19,10,0,0,13,0,0,1,2,3,0,3,4,8,29,6,31,40,3,12,0,1,0,0,16,7,0,8,5,142,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542376277738277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08458677807053068,0.08801176348376583,0.0,0.0,0.14385878624371545,0.0,0.08091619724144053,0.0,0.0,0.07395907051162022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3356820150742578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21471511314521707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107081136552368,0.0,0.0,0.09971354552950276,0.0,0.3208926037012763,0.0755643847136236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08172010058193811,0.0,0.055262123692622775,0.0,0.060113338750655575,0.1774350589116379,0.0,0.0,0.11652108858357035,0.2094641661692852,0.0,0.11259752259746325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103997247181223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743905293012253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051675435528181074,0.21202503856913932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14120884506152476,0.0,0.0,0.11521800726476986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07775546161503034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204234725253116,0.0,0.0,0.07167464779161102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076093555977964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032830329433585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10061452103710578,0.08411508237626958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3310335016309574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10461238487618273,0.0,0.07486680496775126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810840173320287,0.13555037241389192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332503259428164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12477553035870476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10741780402591554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681144634238388
mentalhealth,LargeLie5,2020/04/11,"I talk to myself and create scenarios, can you help me understand why? Hi, I'm new on reddit so I'm not sure where to post this, but I though here would make sense.  So for some background info I'm female, 17. I have an issue, and I hope you can give me some information as to why I do this. For a few years now, I’ve talked to myself. I will literally create scenarios with imaginary people and act them out, I would often talk to them and have them responding. Sometimes these individuals can be famous people and sometimes they are people I know. Most scenarios are situations that aren’t something that would actually happen in my real life. These scenarios can last anywhere from a few minutes up to an hour. So right now I only do it alone in my room, because we are all stuck at home, but I would also do it at school, around other people ect... I would imagine someone talking to me, or watching me and in my head I would respond to them. 

So long story short I sit in my room, and pretend to talk to people. I know I sound phsyco but I just want know why I do this. I’ve tried researching this and haven’t had any answers. I hope you can help. Thanks you.",2.9640485829959538,4.5623869658119665,4.4422177237966745,85.14985829959518,74.64102564102564,7.148538011695907,23.85425101214575,7.85451343220497,1.1704820512820515,906,27,185,13,19,302,123,234,0.036000000000000004,0.8640000000000001,0.1,0.937,1,1,1,0,0,0,30.0,1,4,5,0,13,4,0,0,4,0,25,2,1,1,2,43,40,19,0,9,6,0,0,0,0,7,1,1,3,0,11,12,0,0,8,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,2,38,4,25,30,6,25,0,0,1,0,22,15,0,7,7,134,49,2,0.0,0.0,0.10196228233309093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10821494310948264,0.0,0.08355661222339511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07105337909354775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301379706677283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636930827543118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023152734567624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239573542685824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723174811326368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14006817851236114,0.0,0.10480696850758277,0.2075543499910434,0.10289667252443023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905518803600693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17226666110990804,0.08516921581259458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380084148991872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924659320388635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974454506046468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091225861967833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07946554646886711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3621836959343471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10006774225652484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11892679823398385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892296142690739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574439245854522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11744551138652748,0.0,0.0,0.08852979663669105,0.08043765331701994,0.2066766621510336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847587063525627,0.0,0.0,0.41990540314165503,0.0,0.09619574478551053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265597643863472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07093845258092582,0.0,0.0,0.10877256396798618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06162795677391467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828443673686967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.445338852944306,0.0,0.0,0.06728491067912147
mentalhealth,Lemon__Yellow,2020/04/11,"(tw) I feel like s****** follows me around TW: suicide mentions - not graphic, no detail. This is 50% vent and 50% hoping someone can tell me I'm not alone in this.

First of all I am so thankful I have never lost anyone to suicide and I pray that never happens. I have no idea how I'll cope if it does. But, I feel like I've spent my entire life talking people out of it. I was 12 the first time I had a friend tell me they were suicidal. I dealt with it by writing him a letter in which I listed 101 reasons to stay alive, and he ended up being 1 of 3 people I wrote those for in the next year or so. When I was 14, one of my best friends tried several times. When I was 15, another one of my best friends was so well known for it that it was a joke within the class (idk, he was in on the joke because he was actually very popular, kids just cope that way I guess). Now I'm 22 and one of my current best friends has struggled with this since I met her at 18, and this week she's back in hospital again because of it. I had to call an ambulance for her myself when I was 19 because she made an attempt in front of me (I did everything I could to stop her of course but there was no one else to help us).

So right now I'm worried about her, I'm scared every day that if I miss a phone call or I don't see her Twitter I'll miss a chance to save her, and I'm realising that I've felt this way pretty much every day for 10 years about various different people I've been close to. I called all those people my best friends because they were at that time, and I honestly thought this experience of growing up was normal until I went to uni and discovered it wasn't - even though it kept happening. I've had my own struggles with my mental health too and I'm thinking, what if the reason my brain sometimes thinks this is a solution is because the people I care about have always treated it that way? What if this continues to be a theme in my life and my own thinking gets worse? What if I start to blame myself? (To clarify: I'm safe and stable etc right now).

So while I pray no one else has been through this, I hope someone can empathise. I really don't have any friends I can talk about this with. Anyone?",2.6579772296015207,3.5699889741935493,4.030705249841876,90.52370493358637,74.31182795698925,7.104996837444656,25.28937381404175,7.39963492309942,0.9729962049335864,1703,54,389,19,34,563,219,465,0.066,0.728,0.207,0.9961,2,1,0,0,0,2,53.0,1,0,2,8,25,30,0,3,15,0,37,4,1,4,4,58,71,32,3,9,12,0,3,2,6,0,3,0,0,1,32,18,0,3,11,2,1,4,11,6,1,7,28,4,58,24,51,40,11,54,2,3,1,0,36,18,0,10,30,260,90,1,0.0,0.0,0.06948949866408627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375082209394683,0.0,0.0,0.059251410548074514,0.0,0.0,0.048424413210663236,0.07466861611441036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958167129434496,0.0,0.0,0.06339091259156171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05475515744706304,0.0,0.217041061051792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989168914204016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949255020937736,0.2181363823101352,0.0,0.07260209846204937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05685441764308116,0.0,0.0,0.09184754610542704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439802055491418,0.0,0.0,0.06231528447772965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11897159911040635,0.0,0.0630698444414745,0.0,0.07941661446129443,0.047032728534031454,0.0,0.11999293909174955,0.0,0.06399786116086036,0.06965585211097566,0.0,0.0,0.07201059892882765,0.10174313533225396,0.06837159717989674,0.0,0.0,0.1211403061773975,0.0,0.0,0.3300943672492252,0.0,0.03720364925165984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844450087001345,0.0,0.1259393804571244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07569160476406127,0.0,0.0,0.047729745161152,0.0,0.0,0.14145277446135693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038604664707108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059373640477604,0.06957802740302059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773279669336694,0.0,0.0,0.0673794707246393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07176170317522391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05234664772234698,0.0,0.1098412042080906,0.0,0.07573134687351582,0.0,0.06976948672406856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412645658993489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468360150331356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244493071105045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0456181687750805,0.14642897418662565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216238204886754,0.0,0.0,0.07129241266185367,0.0,0.0567441793502397,0.0,0.0,0.08044565421735522,0.0,0.05890463983201534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12066993881169008,0.0,0.0704273056164272,0.0,0.0504019419902328,0.07589908635117715,0.0,0.059533729775325714,0.0,0.1488857588235379,0.0,0.2336725476226443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11446984231024758,0.1244792272095216,0.06555947871906448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368831355251965,0.0699622661867178,0.05653181833995442,0.12456723925472506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04834608830891948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08565539632793094,0.0,0.0,0.058754702248558735,0.0,0.16956664855738485,0.057119389198089225,0.0,0.06402524631672724,0.06601125377555259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723159740764213,0.07256783179123473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09171224111040824
mentalhealth,lordpanku007,2020/04/11,"Free webinar on mental health “The session was like a therapy. It was very relaxing and nice to hear and agree to whatever the trainer spoke about. Thank you very much” 
~Review for our webinar on “Lockdown Blues: How to Stay Mentally Strong”

EmoSync brings to you a continuation of the second webinar of the Lockdown Blues series: ""Rediscovering Relationship Paradigms"", to enjoy your time better with your parents, grandparents, children, siblings, or significant others. 

Date: 12th April, 2020
Time: 4pm to 5pm

Moderated by: Dr. Tirthankar Guha Thakurta, MD (Teaching faculty at KPC Medical College and Hospital, Works on issues of Mental Health, Gender and Sexuality)

To register: https://seminar.emosync.com/sessions/lockdown-blues-3

You might be required to download Zoho showtime app (https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.zoho.showtime.viewer) to join from your phone. For desktop/laptop, Mozilla Firefox or Google Chrome browser will do.",11.317173913043485,15.329013253623188,9.074710144927538,50.484239130434815,57.76811594202898,10.686956521739132,41.21014492753624,10.686352973137794,5.760553623188407,791,41,88,21,12,236,103,138,0.0,0.799,0.201,0.9813,2,3,0,0,0,0,52.0,1,6,0,4,2,8,0,0,6,0,6,4,0,1,0,10,10,7,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,4,2,0,1,2,5,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,4,7,9,22,4,1,11,0,0,2,0,13,4,0,3,6,52,9,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16144153089459806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3880623307406035,0.20573550870555565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19052402170473276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917967708081204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838895438000135,0.5518712520146316,0.1936457754014844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13418768293334127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20268873495386888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19597932443793167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945630327321639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805803096104224,0.20875005567014213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128807342628086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012287395361402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328910757821884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myproblemsforreddit,2020/04/11,"How do you know the difference between laziness and something relating to mental health? I’m a Senior in High School and I have had difficulties reading text in English and Spanish for the last couple of years. I’d have to reread paragraphs multiple times because they don’t really instantly click in my mind. Part of the problem is that I become distracted after like 3 sentences and think about literally anything else. 

Although on the other hand, I don’t have difficulty reading something online like a wikipedia article, which makes me feel like maybe I’m just really uninterested, bored or lazy. I’ve barely done any homework at home or studied despite me taking some  APs over the years.

I’m also somehow not retaining the Spanish I know, despite being Latino. I stutter and can’t find the right words in Spanish.

I do have OCD but my distractions aren’t any intrusive thoughts or anything. 

How do I know if this is something I can fix on my own or maybe it’s something beyond me?",6.759426229508198,7.931182825136613,6.8646038251366175,73.00870901639347,65.01092896174863,9.378688524590164,37.107923497267755,9.516144504307137,3.772887431693989,799,40,130,15,12,256,117,183,0.076,0.866,0.057,-0.5154,1,0,4,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,1,0,7,8,0,2,9,0,17,2,1,3,0,29,28,15,0,2,8,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,2,0,5,5,0,1,7,2,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,3,16,3,17,24,3,17,0,0,1,0,2,11,0,7,9,85,21,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11272768829776307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19171871519983924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2320003110097131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592945295885705,0.1556820450251138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15597236380872698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14727584671132884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14425361443469464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1177561100611065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712748931378154,0.10070366315769724,0.0,0.0,0.12883720322307118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498365829819118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489346575900429,0.14139691597080167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23240796821411674,0.11490328003028945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20660152290047146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409358669335836,0.0,0.28323162608632024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205708052107666,0.0,0.14233197643142456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15264868868813108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488210857281122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820013628943592,0.0,0.1806084189245681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038123466951026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266161103364636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4340793849459453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10598628330349036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09032310059958668,0.0,0.11190850710876717,0.082196387739425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18155050178195564
mentalhealth,malteserem,2020/04/11,"I think I peaked in high school... Advice please. I’m a junior in college (state school Midwest) and dreading going back to school in the fall for my last year. My boyfriend of two years recently cheated on me and the girls in my friend group all hate me and think I’m a terrible person. No one will tell me why though. I’ve had rumors spread about me, been excluded from events, and am talked shit about behind my back. Even my closest friend still wants to be besties with the girls who bully me. I’m going to be a senior in college with almost no friends, and I don’t know what to do. My anxiety is out of control, I’m depressed, and I’m trying to stop cutting. Does anyone have any advice on how to survive one more year? Every year, it just gets worse and worse and I don’t know if I can do another year of this. I don’t want to go back to school at all because I’m so miserable there",2.8460077220077227,4.01754558918919,3.723571428571432,91.90250000000003,74.18918918918921,6.583011583011582,24.025096525096522,6.868970318607317,0.6421042471042466,694,20,154,6,14,222,106,185,0.225,0.7120000000000001,0.063,-0.9849,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,2,12,11,4,2,6,0,14,1,1,2,2,25,31,12,0,3,2,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,4,11,0,2,4,0,0,4,5,8,0,3,2,0,17,3,27,26,3,30,0,2,0,0,11,11,1,2,14,95,21,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2252275539654065,0.0,0.0,0.11539886021081958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836894908650169,0.12084195938880675,0.08816030647088552,0.0,0.0,0.08058033551862195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658434369162794,0.0,0.07025084553632828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12925442341833895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09925831955918822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084961350591397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07611667882990712,0.0,0.09709689711170608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26710854035706755,0.0,0.0602095245088766,0.0,0.1964851493737204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11377825121587502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12176017960190695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266686854873776,0.09393813528511846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15618279481540084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062543076176632,0.0,0.12650181531053986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11378820699790593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4665268289552365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829491697012325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09203292357405088,0.0963480097816584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926276711389891,0.10072714951723896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476856646957107,0.11322531164003485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782421898791106,0.0,0.11257531681136547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594619336432445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398856047149883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23488419736649604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3710624186049951
mentalhealth,Nagem_McG,2020/04/11,"Am I crazy? Advice needed So I have anxiety, depression and OCD. Lately, being in quarantine and all that has made my anxiety bad and has brought about some relationship problems with my current boyfriend. My family is toxic and I’m currently living with my parents, where I can’t express my feelings when I get anxiety and I hide my panic attacks and pain. I usually will call or text my boyfriend when I need someone to talk to because he tells me I always can and should.
Lately I’ve been confused. My boyfriend frequently calls my worries meaningless, uses curse words when texting me or calling in the midst of a panic attack, and expresses he’s frustrated with my progress and wishes I would speed up the pace with finding therapy or getting back on medication even though I don’t feel ready right now for either of those. I don’t know what to do. Am I in the wrong for contacting him when he told me I can contact him when I’m having a hard time? This is just all building up and making my mental illness worse.",6.3216156462585005,6.8371103112244915,6.6738775510204125,76.30564625850344,65.78571428571428,9.798639455782316,35.21088435374149,9.725611199111238,3.448127210884353,815,37,146,16,12,264,122,196,0.28300000000000003,0.685,0.032,-0.9942,3,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,13,11,3,3,5,0,19,3,0,3,2,37,34,20,0,6,5,1,3,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,4,14,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,11,0,0,4,3,29,0,18,26,4,24,0,1,0,0,17,8,0,5,15,104,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220808471795729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10395236148750396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2867149612581479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28425344400932645,0.0,0.09606400704374896,0.10431192727735177,0.07615660328552462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3827046792258421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760264033474028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251555790973761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11777355798575165,0.0,0.12633744482264345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11418440867968555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054228278751176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11191338025741904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865865282982682,0.0,0.2818545724868862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11031610871370112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182124616581303,0.08339222125560618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258545503097918,0.1259007750267349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852690818967316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13293508726121528,0.2931585485510604,0.13872077260805016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11954182040252193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13412883211008803,0.0,0.10669014658032422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10585338799529584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041457508929402,0.1091949500009822,0.0,0.1428691585209524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12274379154612387,0.0,0.07284810361322486,0.0,0.0,0.1193766503819938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079000244471146,0.13759353066291732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436641548193084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687320367527366,0.12731507002025216,0.08874719431761774,0.13659212308251314,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JuniperLove1395,2020/04/11,"Struggling Lockdown is taking a toll and I don't know how to handle it. At first I thought it would be great since I'm a very indoorsy, introverted person but over the past week or so I've been spiralling. Everywhere I look I see reminders of past trauma. When I go for walks I can't stop thinking of what I'm coming back to. There's constant screaming and noise in my head that I can't shut up. I've struggled with self-harm but I'm desperate to stay clean of it because I know how much it hurts people I love. Today the the urge was so strong I couldn't breathe and the usual ways of staving it off weren't working. I ended up drinking until I couldn't think clearly and fell asleep. I'm a lightweight so it didn't take much and I've sobered up now, though my head is aching. I want to scream. To tear my hair out and scratch my skin off. I feel trapped and angry and scared. I considered calling my mental health team and asking to go to hospital as a voluntary patient, but with the state of the health services right now, I feel like that would be selfish. But suicidal thoughts have been very heavily at the forefront of my mind and despite a call to Samaritans, I don't feel safe. No-one in the house has checked on me at all today. I'm not sure that if I lost control and did it, I'd be found before it was too late.",2.4031521739130426,3.9960686630434807,3.2414492753623168,93.1963043478261,76.13768115942028,6.104347826086958,25.768115942028984,6.7026698264267655,0.8112550724637679,1045,38,231,9,23,331,156,276,0.209,0.7070000000000001,0.084,-0.9898,0,2,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,6,12,15,0,3,13,0,22,10,6,3,3,46,48,26,1,6,7,0,6,1,0,2,2,2,1,1,12,15,1,3,10,2,1,5,9,9,0,1,11,10,25,6,32,30,3,39,0,2,2,1,6,15,0,2,17,138,37,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714192507024856,0.0,0.0,0.08812558607737518,0.0,0.06986326621939233,0.0,0.09752198006282704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340527959028529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872364509743567,0.0,0.12384927974178545,0.12854131682500233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227107239860656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150764356010354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17384598630332662,0.08187514974432339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748451997235966,0.0,0.1256604851296684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13026741713027695,0.0,0.0,0.12635444623596653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23523936483041746,0.2436434243630407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322409065144714,0.12268899309770855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259698446090428,0.0,0.12928150799332686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599111324743115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09624088153976404,0.0,0.12510690472690528,0.0,0.10343714809042748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549673939557732,0.0,0.115720238155385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849842918185826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21881039456065185,0.07945395284756188,0.100070272522413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09787361557581363,0.0,0.0,0.11474144065369553,0.0,0.09132681367146334,0.0,0.11955992945239033,0.0,0.0,0.09480396276627796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12215564303511213,0.0,0.09581645040277514,0.0,0.2396239069823509,0.0,0.12536128205120908,0.0,0.1080155908439148,0.0,0.17234016209973954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14687087152693104,0.1126006388889772,0.18197005927869575,0.0,0.0,0.21726776831344816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12622324326532355,0.1891252920042015,0.06759808388080782,0.09096957547023647,0.09193069446161008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343514483631627,0.0,0.0,0.16282682250389602,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,calloutmyname_,2020/04/11,"Is this depression? Hi!

I hope everyone's okay and staying safe in these times.

I wanted to share some things I've been feeling for many years since I can recall.

I'm a very indecisive person and I've always felt I lack passion, meaning I don't have something I love doing and makes me wanna improve and do it my whole life. I like and have liked many things, but it's very, very hard to keep motivated and constant to be good enough or to get somewhere with that path.

Currently, I'm 25 and I feel I haven't done anything or like I'm on my way to get where I want to. I feel lost, and when I try something new that I like, I leave it or stop practicing it. Back in the years I have started things but haven't finished them. 

Right know this makes me feel sad, I feel I'm not good enough, like I'm empty and that my lack of discipline is always going to ruin it. I don't know how to get out of this vicious circle. I've also been anxious because I feel I'm running out of time as I'm not getting any younger.

It feels like I can't move and stop procrastinating, when I try to study or read something I get bored or get distracted easily. Right know everything is so messy, I don't know what I want to do and even if I did, I probably wouldn't have the discipline or what it takes to get good at it.

Kindly let me know what you think, thank you!",3.4391578947368413,3.9099506701754367,4.585614035087719,88.90263157894739,72.12280701754386,7.824561403508773,25.87719298245614,7.85451343220497,1.1612456140350875,1051,31,241,13,19,346,137,285,0.165,0.6459999999999999,0.18899999999999997,0.6621,1,0,3,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,1,2,8,25,1,2,3,1,24,3,0,4,0,60,66,26,0,9,11,0,9,6,0,1,1,0,0,1,21,14,0,6,16,1,0,3,9,8,0,0,6,9,34,17,24,57,6,28,0,4,0,2,7,9,0,10,20,142,55,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243998536046017,0.15074627509741914,0.0,0.0,0.06160022054971113,0.0,0.0,0.10233412680700624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454290683569052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965349812913188,0.0,0.055219160512985324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788911437382776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801985923647962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269887350337963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871949559131649,0.0,0.059829872137986975,0.0,0.0,0.08655688587149461,0.08141105076624207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3206139153038869,0.06471322170307522,0.08697483740887565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33128477828538394,0.0,0.05148096993876378,0.22793266329296655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114546397002707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08997034271000089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051521382267987,0.0,0.09432928781776916,0.2489129640539105,0.0,0.0,0.09591536781520847,0.0,0.09262826867063767,0.0639821521584199,0.2655285763481041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988831273891997,0.0,0.08175558905983868,0.0,0.12093103558685014,0.18367589953821048,0.0,0.09867252246635852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09627644749104004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748658355794026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909444748318226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766486381851433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906085049208916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15471646777851095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749320139258688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092079468158433,0.0,0.0,0.06411581549218244,0.09655048246871764,0.0,0.15146454613101706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810788837108424,0.0,0.0,0.08339756912798639,0.0,0.0,0.1805399369001857,0.05804256420004372,0.0,0.0,0.1056405079255903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300116842260275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22422383939472346,0.1602863555990658,0.07190135619932961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113379168759364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11666624136325912
mentalhealth,fifcyhxhxhx,2020/04/11,"I get serious enjoyment from negatively effecting people I love annoying people and seriously enjoy making them mad, sad, or just mentally negatively affected in general. It has been this way as long as I can remember, maybe like since I was 7-8ish?

Nothing makes me laugh more than seeing complete discord that I've caused, or making someone feel terrible. I scam people on the interent, not because I need money, but because I enjoy it. I scam them after making them trust me, or making ""friends"" with them, and like hearing them cry and get angry at me when I tell them over the call.

I've framed people for fun. Innocent people, and I start smilling when I think about it like right now. I gain nothing, except enjoyment.

I've tried being nice to people, and I want to connect with people, but I can't. I don't understand why people feel so much for others. I end up just getting bored and then do something obnoxious to them.

I don't necessarily think I have something wrong with me, but I know my behavior is no typical, and I know that I struggle to make emotional connections with anyone on the planet. I wish I enjoyed being nice to others, but I just don't.

I'm not a sociopath, I'm not a psychopath, I'm not a narcissist, I'm not low self esteem. I have emotions, don't necessarily think I'm important or overly intelligent, and am confident. Its been this way since I was very young as I've said. I have no idea why.

I've seen other people, and help others, or make someone happy, and see the gratification they get. I've enwvr had that. Why?",4.579513742071882,5.966296714285718,6.0934173965569345,75.74463228631836,70.22923588039869,9.193657505285412,29.62866203563878,9.573946990214177,2.858281063122924,1225,48,223,28,22,417,152,301,0.147,0.607,0.245,0.9905,1,0,2,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,8,2,8,26,2,1,7,0,20,1,0,10,0,56,54,26,0,3,18,0,2,3,1,0,0,2,0,1,13,14,0,0,11,0,1,0,14,10,0,0,7,7,40,16,26,45,2,20,0,2,3,1,16,9,0,5,12,144,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061238353368862464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067765746004086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942952847235403,0.0,0.0,0.0899693448214437,0.0,0.0,0.09182653507656834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0962031161474352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19703265006949772,0.07757036753098827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856671004189905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766451176518548,0.0,0.18302887990302208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932311186387688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870963930382397,0.0,0.05870339315243778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886777489300384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09626395413621364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12836229117566142,0.0,0.0,0.07750602626998485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904486117817172,0.0,0.4092248567354268,0.0,0.0879864290142784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08826059013221925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06438177767515506,0.0649398643415327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16807178985431015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5464559019610453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921168460642732,0.07479330684400311,0.08330915397782154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958071044639805,0.0,0.09136560897613144,0.0,0.0,0.14489506360809085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14841342303056787,0.13484756458118125,0.0,0.0,0.06198996048081111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155820134286913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654925654348295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835423054414828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05946144107408587,0.0,0.0,0.09117443597294823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226312174947125,0.05165727453736084,0.1390347200639325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370834585691685,0.0,0.1007133044455533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957555772640424,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dyl_08,2020/04/11,"Turning 25 this month Hello all

I am turning 25 this month. I mostly feel pretty good. I just want to write out some thoughts about my life. Writing helps me sort myself out. 

I left home for the city when I was 18. I did two years of college. Then I got a job in my field. It is not an amazing job by any means but it has always paid the bills and bought some weed to smoke. So for the past 5 years I have been pretty content. There are things about my job that can be stressful but I try to be aware of the stress and let it float by. Most people think of me as very chill and cool. I have tried to leave and find a better job but I can’t find one in my field. I haven’t looked in a while though because like I said my current situation works well.

I turn 25 next month. That has got me thinking. Where do I go from here? Do I just keep chilling and have hope that better things are ahead? Or do I shake things up and see what happens? 

I have always been a very inward focused person. I self reflect a lot. That has gotten me down before. Negative thoughts are a bitch lol. I have gotten pretty good at focusing on the positive things. I generally feel good. I feel like because of my introspective tendencies I have never really made socializing a priority. That is something I have been working on. I’m pretty outgoing with people I know. It is just that meeting people is hard these days. I have never been in a relationship. I have realized I would like to get married someday. So I have been trying to be more outward. I have become friends with a girl at work. We talk and text a lot. I kind of think she likes me. I kind of think I like her. This is exciting. Maybe a little uncomfortable but I want to be out of my comfort zone more. She wants a better job. She has been applying for stuff left and right. She wants to possibly move away. I told her if she moved I would miss her a lot but I understand it is her decision to make. We were talking the other night and she told me she thinks I can do so much more with my life. That made me feel good. I told her that sometimes I feel a bit lost and I don’t know where to go. That is ok. I accept that feeling. She was asking if I would move for a better job. I told her possibly if it was a good opportunity but it would be big for me. I have my brother here who I live with. We are in a band together. I definitely want to see where that takes us. Anyway after my conversation with my friend she texted me and said that if she moved she would want me to go with her. Idk how serious she was but I said “that could be cool. It would be huge and require some conversation though.”

So I guess I feel like when I look at my life I think I am doing ok and I am pretty content. But maybe sometimes you have to look for ways to change and grow as a person. I feel like maybe it is getting close to time to look for a new door and see where that goes. Or I could just stay where I am and chill. 

If you read this thanks. I hope all is well with you.",0.4387628161312378,2.6054886076555057,2.112217133743449,95.87268660287084,85.57097288676236,5.241549327865117,18.20754158122579,6.610729790773281,-0.17581866484392794,2315,58,537,26,70,755,247,627,0.055,0.71,0.235,0.9990000000000001,7,0,2,0,0,0,60.0,4,3,0,11,26,41,1,3,26,5,72,3,0,4,4,115,140,44,0,21,20,1,9,7,2,6,3,3,2,4,36,30,0,2,26,2,3,9,7,7,2,2,30,21,107,34,62,94,15,60,0,2,7,0,54,29,1,19,27,380,143,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358068033240028,0.0,0.0,0.03415400041456086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04695260273986362,0.0,0.04718704346728632,0.0,0.0,0.06123209346402408,0.055468394150096814,0.04273687247352158,0.0,0.0,0.1776759687007661,0.05483153292759654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05313026744891262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08019945622485382,0.0,0.0,0.032390285392971806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031578588236873,0.10763997504314612,0.0,0.0,0.09180753976376167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760578055830494,0.0,0.05247986987210675,0.0,0.08563026493768516,0.2106272836668832,0.0803373432835183,0.0,0.05532733052601019,0.0,0.04441286292546128,0.0,0.04499078388583848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03366404728394111,0.0,0.05037870529906866,0.09976740650581854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2990370555276847,0.04464134416627768,0.0,0.10460100650559856,0.05520352623170405,0.0,0.0,0.0531798990797404,0.10913691221054064,0.05135737986561235,0.10642395912753357,0.171758156004941,0.0503375806530136,0.04434865781775692,0.0,0.16870183638414374,0.0,0.05482536172282648,0.12809578939669658,0.0,0.09504620989627076,0.033524868926674035,0.0,0.15137009025987422,0.054708592650283605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026480557689127,0.21352039315299814,0.03692037361882208,0.0,0.07747159511749939,0.04850659274336669,0.05341372834526673,0.047131763994958165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03403304051573184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04794443223053461,0.10445686546281804,0.08770721169577818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323988868804133,0.0,0.2554790062993683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05023752978503555,0.0,0.032174741043893944,0.0,0.0,0.053921714136811925,0.0,0.042890969037865205,0.14332339996489887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006592934564908,0.0,0.05239452126236824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056453811145317175,0.0,0.051196980424539164,0.0,0.038664841556920085,0.09934551874715072,0.0,0.0,0.05353203590564253,0.0,0.0,0.11506270366600192,0.0,0.057494393580735915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03776215128619024,0.0807361985928619,0.0,0.04623945474792578,0.0,0.0,0.1334662121814465,0.1930888309223528,0.09868952909969808,0.07974439415999017,0.02928598241440835,0.0,0.0,0.19196450204605564,0.0,0.1022962723138354,0.16388766867819762,0.04906149006541858,0.05228489119376453,0.06041321407379136,0.0,0.0,0.08288001823480187,0.17774028101607553,0.039865424628758216,0.0,0.0,0.0903147046813296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096908761198942,0.0,0.0,0.2140658693804626,0.0,0.0,0.06468513944151286
mentalhealth,whatsverest,2020/04/11,"Is this a medical illness? Hello, this is my first time posting, but I feel like this could be the only place where I can say what I feel. It got a bit long, so a big thanks if you decide to read through.
I have always looked down to people that do a self-diagnosis about mental health issues, because I feel it's much more complicated most of the times. In my case, I think I might have a depression, but I would really appreciate an experienced persons take on it.
I'm a man, 24 years old. As far as I can remember I was quite emotionally sensitive. However for the most part of my life I felt generally good, I had amazing friends, I was a professional athlete and doing decent in school. 
I feel like things started going downhill after moving to another city for university. First 1.5 years were dedicated to partying mostly, I abused drugs quite often and although the situation was never that bad, I think it took it's toll.
Then I met a girl that I still live with. I quit uni (never regretted it tho), moved in with her. She's a really caring person and she loves me a lot. But I feel like she can't understand me anymore. Now we are stuck in a loop where my self esteem is really low and I can't make her happy, that results in her low self esteem. We started smoking weed daily for about half a year now, I always smoked from time to time, but now it's too often. I noticed that I can go a lot of time without any of my friends contacting me, I don't think they care about me anymore. 
I feel like everything is not how it's supposed to be, I lost my ambition, I lost my passion for the world, all the excitement is gone, I sleep more than I used to. I know that's what happens when you smoke weed, but I don't know what to blame. I am working from home for the past year, maybe it's just a lack of activity, I don't know. I just have that feeling that I am going nowhere. 
I feel lost and helpless at this point, I lost my main job so I'm low on cash, low on everything. Is that just a part of being a human being? Any help is highly appreciated, thank you.",3.7455147957935937,4.4947269361702125,5.301930382326566,83.03,71.60047281323877,8.576799543490665,26.879351104589553,8.841846274778883,1.8332700578788608,1606,52,343,29,29,545,209,423,0.129,0.691,0.18,0.9821,2,0,3,0,1,0,54.0,2,3,1,10,20,28,0,0,24,0,35,8,1,4,3,58,77,20,0,5,11,0,9,4,2,2,5,1,1,7,26,9,0,0,18,1,1,7,9,12,0,3,15,12,62,16,42,55,14,55,0,11,1,2,27,22,0,9,29,238,88,5,0.0,0.08657974843862436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160544978080362,0.0,0.0,0.09938451244255747,0.0766235821486119,0.0,0.0,0.14493788352364462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0610130383405945,0.044544721561845975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07977696756371729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14900591828686202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0583429741634836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293780770473925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474166919677963,0.0,0.0,0.08219747232746331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313468931707779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29558389212085057,0.2088139272929088,0.07016169531143304,0.0,0.0,0.12431198922542284,0.0,0.0,0.11291228801740955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458748650027335,0.06129030169306034,0.05844328333613665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06461835618739566,0.07778774017063275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767335458196621,0.0,0.0,0.0489794004442789,0.07720580807646718,0.07329833991424108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07626939654777233,0.07251383831357025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12047729708938065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05161373563718441,0.14279942433337325,0.0,0.06452494116648938,0.06466744925058465,0.06136305247442636,0.0,0.3190719551544528,0.1242483791123506,0.06595138203774058,0.0,0.048776903328104367,0.0,0.07341181333695189,0.0,0.0,0.07361352343699651,0.07364056071356445,0.07751907765617877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15533041453766958,0.05371718227390072,0.0,0.11271705532944508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08319427972436857,0.07667799171562037,0.0,0.0,0.05557543281222303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826222791501754,0.0697566019167624,0.05065973004279997,0.1276093336985041,0.07634590188398323,0.0,0.06907775780664688,0.0,0.06998389029674827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233166908914936,0.07309293704106802,0.0,0.1404376169467551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277764824379512,0.0,0.0,0.05811071168686655,0.0,0.07395394154436004,0.0,0.0,0.22869373516059746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08213729618931526,0.07312593496951819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344312091229042,0.0,0.0583563218895175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494192406169949,0.0,0.0,0.13455190050806204,0.0,0.0,0.0485465621310972,0.1404669957134814,0.0,0.0,0.2130477431873853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118697214289168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07607173912765304,0.0,0.06311175050038845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043992093706074,0.0,0.0531981325283982,0.0,0.0,0.05190907800144396,0.0,0.0,0.18822688316572286
mentalhealth,snek-o,2020/04/11,I can’t accept how awful our world is. There is so much injustice in this world. I’ve seen so much of it in my personal life and I’m only 21. Not to mention all the horrible things going on around the world.  I feel so out of control. I want to be able to help everyone but I can’t even help myself. I’ve always been depressed but now I feel more anger and despair than ever. I don’t know how to feel ok anymore. I’m constantly thinking about terrible things that have happened to me or other people. I sometimes feel like I’m too empathetic. I spend so much time feeling other people’s pain... I talk to a therapist and it does help a lot. But this anger is constant. I cry myself to sleep almost every night. Sometimes it continues until morning. I just want to be happy. I want everyone to be happy...,0.5106155632984901,2.9261078780487817,2.8532752613240437,88.51565040650408,89.1219512195122,5.562833914053427,21.224157955865273,7.07126945348624,0.8581304297328689,628,22,125,10,21,214,96,164,0.182,0.647,0.17,-0.8029999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,1,0,0,1,14,11,2,0,4,2,11,3,1,3,2,29,27,14,0,3,6,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,10,5,0,1,8,0,1,1,4,6,0,0,2,6,17,5,19,22,6,17,0,2,1,0,7,8,0,3,9,87,27,0,0.1293456840508639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12952101863158946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10762597079703076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282761623563491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115145081682756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2795534671257734,0.1450721831497987,0.0,0.0,0.14208016032446008,0.0,0.0,0.1114052481409216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131912797580942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543160442739606,0.11700057640416996,0.10897931744646208,0.2471906881962324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.327005321295366,0.09240458253042687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07351013301856463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437996123549747,0.2753817716907329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26009305658787224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07108500527248432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136068185145058,0.06319176772438752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996507513461114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28525188144761504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213821623647996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983732212604318,0.1376329273789144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1793440223608314,0.11293966221760388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943909595698588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558523777737633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396316131265318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15018030850078026,0.17186305013913916,0.0828794915899801,0.0,0.0,0.07542250854049612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288743070529493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dargousta,2020/04/11,"I want to be perfect and that makes me depressed? Is it the lake of approval? I noticied that recently i only see the strengths in people and don't see their weaknesses. I see someone and I'm like i want all that beauty i want to be that eloquent i want to be that charismatic that charming that confident. Like recently i saw someone beautiful and i got depressed that i don't look like that. And that person wasn't really that beautiful. So i noticied that not only i only see the strengths of people but over rate them and magnify them.
So is it the result of the lack of approval love affection and appreciation?
And doea this ever happen to you",2.3536670416197936,4.966288511811031,3.9289595050618686,83.05112204724409,81.20472440944881,7.0931383577052864,27.18166479190101,8.192908349453996,2.2205617547806518,519,23,95,11,14,172,60,127,0.05,0.6,0.35,0.9887,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,3,5,3,11,0,0,5,0,8,2,0,3,3,21,23,11,0,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,15,8,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,3,6,17,8,10,17,2,5,0,2,6,1,6,2,0,0,6,70,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2719605085542981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280986215197908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626961152065844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13961116260285306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313939276679844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325779175188242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249123104975994,0.0,0.10538491821201622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.360220434789611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189057173757561,0.13785314644152682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011408116410481,0.0,0.3117713334264041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5032339096016962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675393572298959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724825893444231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kl4wS,2020/04/11,"I have an issue with constant attention seeking Hey, I don't know if this is the right subreddit to ask this question, but I hope you guys can help me. 

Basically, as the title suggests I constantly seek attention. I feel like it has a negative impact on my life. I feel disgusted by this. I don't want to seek attention, but I just can't help it. It's like an addiction almost. I always feel like I have to share something about myself or prove something to others. I am not proud of it. When the urge for attention manifests, it's almost incredibly hard for me to stop it. It's like an itch. I try to resist it as much as I can, but it is very difficult. I don't want to be an attention seeking person. I don't admire such people. If you can give me any advice, I would appreciate it.",1.8405175983436883,3.793355080745343,4.280472049689443,83.4909772256729,78.93788819875776,8.020041407867495,24.39792960662525,8.841846274778883,1.9355760662525885,612,22,126,15,15,214,87,161,0.154,0.6729999999999999,0.17300000000000001,0.6382,0,0,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,0,1,4,10,1,0,8,0,16,3,1,0,1,27,25,10,0,6,8,0,4,4,0,1,3,0,0,2,14,1,0,1,11,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,0,4,23,8,17,23,1,6,0,0,0,0,12,2,0,7,8,90,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17622561005312185,0.0,0.1579654220305685,0.0,0.0,0.3237442192858616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345082298560211,0.0,0.0,0.10992957032639797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15112371558966112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34937888815065216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24520981280934065,0.23096984370421555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15507226925495174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600618661327866,0.0,0.0,0.14480931900175018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167051711923903,0.0,0.0,0.16055788482522812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16872371329277747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884025070992978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11418028105365773,0.31590192423387503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11883354098915072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206982294500066,0.14114914767250536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.181088334626504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805076242855646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488967246881221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13514913037063528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975176284823418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13338063890916166,0.1906942328339025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114833639578126,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AH1-R,2020/04/11,"My mental health has been gradually going downhill since 2017. The only person where I can act myself is with my mum and mentally ill brother, not my dad, also *one* of my many friends.

I've had eye contact issues since when I joined High School (UK) in 2015, but it was only with girls I found attractive. I don't consider myself a shy person, but others will get that impression.

Now I struggle with eye contact with everyone out of my comfort zone except my friends, mum and brl.

I feel slightly uncomfortable with my dad (I'm male which is just weird), never used to be like this, I don't think he notices. Also, I feel extreme hate towards him on the inside.

Insecurities that I've developed since 2018: height (sort of), weight (not as much these days), facial appearance (teeth, hairstyle, asymmetry), taste in music. I give a shit about the opinions of others even though I shouldn't care.

My dad says that I have depression (no diagnosis or anything). Sometimes I feel really down and just feel like I don't give a fuck about life, as if I've gave up on everything. I don't feel suicidal, as that will never be a last resort.

My addiction to P and M is a sin and that's not gonna help obviously.

My life was good between 2007 and 2013. 2014 was when my brother became mentally ill. I also got my first smartphone that year, social media (sort of addicted) is quite evil, will quit very soon.

Can someone give insight to this?",4.9893875598086135,6.102013454545458,5.6736459330143525,80.16457416267943,69.0,8.698564593301437,29.019138755980865,8.99025400887824,2.3179454545454545,1120,40,212,20,19,364,164,275,0.158,0.721,0.121,-0.935,0,0,0,0,0,0,51.0,0,0,0,3,14,18,4,2,8,0,23,15,5,1,3,39,44,19,1,2,10,7,6,2,2,5,7,1,0,4,13,12,2,0,8,0,0,3,11,9,0,2,8,10,30,9,28,29,1,24,1,1,2,1,24,11,2,6,12,133,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22989702995902705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529683652889503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677066582440181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075062416708978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800205984163397,0.0,0.09081796539538893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06964415612400454,0.0,0.0,0.10075537616625828,0.09476543618055924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665759329034865,0.07532855335511884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968982514190976,0.0,0.1156128885049964,0.16293011529709064,0.09748042311192666,0.05508965432423342,0.3034518148636853,0.05992572906660204,0.0884406480179029,0.08433245893333674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10410320593337792,0.0,0.11208105725038782,0.0,0.0,0.07067627006494008,0.11140639723432327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11005517460820614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595017886177303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489551234137314,0.10302831994427088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10690272740474638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187854552841978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751279205299617,0.0,0.16264839853341198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004763897318073,0.0,0.0,0.07145095604022436,0.16038841891832126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.184137650715894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243033775451096,0.0,0.0,0.0675495334267942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385256486590126,0.0,0.10671402053812816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823580052084976,0.2616708020620654,0.0,0.0,0.10748593549891683,0.08934157468659902,0.0,0.1042858966643714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102319954140514,0.0,0.11533760919094176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06756366441269497,0.10359728514520206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106896128120297,0.0,0.08700157919728674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284012579791747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790188276823042
mentalhealth,xeresea,2020/04/11,"Hearing screams from my bathroom Hi,

I am 21 and I have been living alone for almost 3 years without financial support. What I am going to tell is not something new for me. About 4 months ago, I started hearing screams from my bathroom. Of course, as any sane person would think, I also thought that it was coming from another flat. It was not consistent as it is now, hell, I even hear it while I am writing these lines.

At first, whenever I hear these screams (no idea whether a man or woman, cannot distinguish it honestly) I immediately rushed to the bathroom and those screams suddenly stopped. I tried recording it and the most horrific part was that there was no actual sound being produced, that is when I realized it is all in my head (I knew it, but wanted to deny it anyway) Since it was rare, I dismissed it. But for the past 20-30 days, it is happening almost every day and it is driving me mad. Not to mention they became actually horrific/nightmarish.

I have never seen a doctor/therapist before, so I have no diagnosis nor medications. I have a history of Xanax (not prescribed) but stopped doing it, now I just drink. But drinking actually makes these sound worse so I am even afraid of drinking at this point.

I thought about seeing a doctor, but the whole country is a mess because of the coronavirus pandemic.

What should I do? This community seemed the best to post this, so here I am.",4.181431989063569,6.177824552631581,5.051018455228982,80.38453178400547,72.27067669172932,8.295010252904989,31.26384142173616,8.97023862654752,2.8109233082706764,1105,51,203,23,22,359,151,266,0.146,0.8320000000000001,0.022000000000000002,-0.976,0,1,4,0,0,0,40.0,0,0,1,3,15,11,2,1,11,0,28,7,1,2,2,39,46,20,0,3,13,0,0,0,0,2,3,10,0,3,26,5,3,2,8,3,0,4,11,8,0,1,10,12,27,3,23,33,5,26,1,0,2,0,12,4,1,5,17,155,53,2,0.0,0.0,0.3131835178779822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09482900612446324,0.0,0.2142448167137356,0.11079631864679053,0.0,0.08554978422511741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07274829709068226,0.11217512631097984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521242713497988,0.0,0.09102988398702702,0.0,0.1122661761943978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09215155346729416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13798313966262776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21899179384502188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3143913614846676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413151210937416,0.0,0.09013306928320727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099491763700836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06079771893997274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459975720360272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978967036917883,0.0,0.4822851967080153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12076445775369413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944629998049577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140824193361837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077684709875046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538833615842788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250756206137029,0.10331943482224563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158460940405524,0.10212202838365103,0.0,0.0934085351055921,0.0,0.0,0.10112821653536154,0.0,0.1024547732386812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524713349813362,0.09738820272445363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884928067145988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235642520364317,0.0,0.0,0.07571915087337344,0.0,0.0,0.17887578489678393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139668023917205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350295855172827,0.0,0.0,0.12420900101273034,0.0,0.06854679523301772,0.0,0.16985620446365576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726306291037339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06309803932868258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11943644126499375,0.0,0.10312239139544542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109019104958672,0.0759936721596351,0.0,0.0,0.06888993506361253
mentalhealth,Deentheman,2020/04/11,"Different perspective I think life without sadness would be suck. How else would we be grateful for the good times in life? Depression is hard but I think living with it and experiencing happiness through it is the greatest happiness you’ll may ever feel. For example, imagine being depressed for an entire day and one thing came across you that made you smile deeply, I think that one thing just might help you get through the day. This is what it is with me, I got a girl and when I’m down, hearing her voice alone can bring so much light in my soul and I can be my normal self again. I know suffering from depression and anxiety is hard, but the little positivity things we experience should be the most significant. Just a good for thought.",5.587499999999999,7.075185607142861,5.4628571428571435,80.83214285714288,67.92857142857143,9.314285714285717,30.42857142857143,9.642632912329526,2.730657142857144,595,23,114,13,10,185,90,140,0.146,0.633,0.222,0.9456,1,1,0,0,0,0,12.0,2,4,0,0,7,10,1,0,8,0,18,2,0,2,1,32,32,10,0,4,5,0,3,0,0,6,2,2,0,2,10,10,0,0,7,0,0,2,1,6,0,2,4,7,16,4,14,17,3,13,1,5,0,0,11,5,1,3,6,84,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1458459097874458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1077260716920333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16105930496919799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816330793767496,0.0,0.3638613320518029,0.0,0.0,0.1471257768543183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763611996773005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12737875546461022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377479034769815,0.0,0.0,0.07120226606921942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357206222880464,0.0,0.0,0.2362244214215988,0.11262573694934686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998086713216808,0.2522921462906233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871313268794987,0.0,0.09438793913488457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739038372362747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19892910462997024,0.0,0.1411375304579168,0.12434566704084672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13324624634439367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14938659757437772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351809301411484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379726215622764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1908450596970458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469048222930983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28066145624939703,0.2706931918643531,0.0,0.11179447555481524,0.0821126319815714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.135744392739907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20006740999299308,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ForniteNoob93432,2020/04/11,"How long for promazine withdrawal symptoms to begin? I've been switched to liquid promazine. I take 25mg 5 times per day (x2 25mg at bed time). Last night I couldn't take my meds as I was away from the house. I got home this morning and took them, but couldn't stomach the promazine liquid. Made me heave and want to vomit. I tried again and it didn't work.

I've just started feeling very nauseous, like I want to vomit. I ended up curling up in a ball. I googled withdrawal symptoms from promazine and it said acute withdrawal can cause nausea and vomitting.

I've had to stomach the liquid and take 25mg just. Nausea seems to have calmed a little. Still queezy. But is it possible for the side effects to come on so soon?

I hate mental health meds. I'm on paroxotine and valium too. Doctor is going to be upset I've self medicated more valium. Can't help it, this virus stuff is making my anxiety going wild.",2.01702529805176,4.417840740331492,3.2501250363477787,88.72822041291073,80.82320441988949,6.020471067170688,22.785984297760983,7.273561745256523,0.959291712707182,718,24,141,10,19,232,110,181,0.081,0.83,0.08800000000000001,-0.6697,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,2,8,4,1,1,6,0,13,10,2,5,0,23,32,12,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,0,8,1,2,1,7,8,0,0,3,1,0,4,4,2,0,0,8,2,13,2,20,21,1,25,0,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,13,77,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269582297907604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13840760032254093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15133342210517658,0.0,0.1268991111954152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500619970207456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507834808660381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304776554249488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448705635145926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744539198526745,0.0,0.11782152560446725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14544338797333473,0.0,0.1565893052761699,0.0,0.0,0.09874235932889218,0.0,0.1477692857073075,0.0,0.0,0.16998210999806668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008165453204638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07197082825424772,0.1476486601466376,0.0,0.13036942985956834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13939332563413848,0.09833412560559217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272682398989345,0.14840469496867378,0.1484592020564276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13824545625608034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607589819617916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401306121454149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13411034216626924,0.15368201576350593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10427054764424444,0.0,0.11764621152687668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16864080609386387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062340644050915,0.3322883799338988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718015052956866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636727502468756,0.10001743792739036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215505740100044,0.1737807949558874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072473135664668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,B_B_123,2020/04/11,"Having major mental conflicts I know this is kind of cringy and ridiculous but bear with me

Ever since I was a kid i've been hella scared of zombie apocalypses and evetually growing up i grew out of that phase and carried on with my life, however due to some paranoia and media influence i've been thinking about the possible future where everyone in the planet are shambling corpses I really hate myself for having this kind of mindset, i need help to hopefully get myself around this. (Plus i've been reading alot of articles about topics like these so) I just want to get this off my mind.",4.893829365079366,6.9160108035714325,5.488333333333332,77.87888888888891,70.42857142857143,8.192063492063493,28.515873015873016,8.841846274778883,2.480175396825397,478,18,81,9,9,154,80,112,0.13,0.7559999999999999,0.114,-0.455,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,2,1,4,0,8,1,0,1,1,22,16,7,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,6,9,0,1,2,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,4,0,11,4,20,12,3,12,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,3,4,59,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20361216475371244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20689325406638573,0.0,0.21855484574349973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23899689249391415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258168345938114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533083582188222,0.0,0.0,0.227173773345625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4763600894494783,0.12570030429034965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16155397984258754,0.11174261577603456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304992171995599,0.0,0.2309452582692069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1695953751651233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578510728852172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287851234093001,0.0,0.14652595642913616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289918519729167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892022174773193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14655660884254834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490688568575335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Major-Environment,2020/04/11,"I think my mom has OCPD and my divorced dad has NPD with ADHD My god my entire life is a mental health crisis, I have adhd but it is extremely mild and well regulated. However I think my dad has advanced ADHD and Narcissistic personality disorder and my mom as Obsessive compulsive personality disorder and it is so annoying. 

I sometimes just hate it and I need a place to rant and I just can’t find people who understand me. 

PS I’m 17.",1.538160676532769,4.207661906976746,4.74746300211417,74.95070824524316,86.90697674418604,8.708668076109936,25.26004228329809,9.095868883498916,2.9609209302325565,348,15,64,12,11,126,54,86,0.254,0.674,0.07200000000000001,-0.9628,1,0,0,0,1,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,2,1,2,0,8,2,0,0,0,16,14,10,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,8,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,0,13,1,3,14,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,0,42,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5858125594321635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3724351126988083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850489269401645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041656746564528,0.0,0.17270994030226106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147652917612555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374285510281866,0.0,0.0,0.38059208531871797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120477766819175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11264402057191493,0.28374467053334845,0.1697582939177756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16069808252285225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.208222811839655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16914868160562907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460901311799088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rimjabrane,2020/04/11,"— Mental health MATTERS.  If you believe for one second that my oversensitive and emotional sides are here to make you laugh, there’s nothing wrong with me, but there’s definitely something wrong with you.  


And if you think that you can magically fix me, I am not a broken chair for you to fix and I don’t need to fix my attitude but you definitely need to be more open about mental health issues.  


Because I figured out the best way to slowly let go of what causes me pain and aches inside me is to write about it. And because I know that unfortunately more than enough people with whom I share the same air and breathe the same oxygen not only don’t take mental health as a serious matter but would happily use it as a major weakness they see in you to make fun of YOU (anyone who suffers from mental health issues including myself).  


And God I wish there was an easy way to make people understand that you just don't wake up in the morning and decide that you would like to enjoy feeling sad for today or that you’re in a such a good mood to spend your day wrapped in your bed trying to fight all these sad and darks ideas that keep making you feel all bad and terrible about yourself, your life and everyone around you.  


Depression doesn't knock on your door and asks for permission to mess up with your peaceful state of mind; you never really know when it will hit you and you have no control over it. I know, because more than enough times I have been there myself and I still do. It's an issue that I had to deal with for a couple of years now and it breaks me to admit that I did let it ruin some of my best days and happiest moments of my life so far and remembering those moments only makes feel even more depressed and sad and low because I let it get into me and I had no control over my feelings.  


You see, it’s not that easy for me to keep it all together when I am breaking inside, or to explain to anyone that I am feeling terribly lonely and left behind most of the time when I am surrounded by lovely and sweet people who love me and care about me and with whom I share genuine conversations every single day. And how can I possibly make you understand and believe that crying is not a hobby that I enjoy but I have no control over my tears and I can’t fight them or stop them from ruining down my face when my heart is aching and I can’t figure out how to express why I am feeling the way that I do? And it’s definitely not easy for me to pretend that I am all happy and satisfied with everything that I have become because I simply know that you wouldn’t understand until maybe someday it happens to you which I definitely wouldn’t want you to go through.  


My point is, no matter how good and how well you think you know a person, you only know what that person chooses to show you, you only see the picture of themselves and their lives they chose to let you see, they only share the parts of them that wouldn’t make them seem vulnerable in front you. And you can never really know what’s really going on in someone else’s life. You may think they have all figured out, that they have the perfect life, the perfect family and the perfect friends but you would never really guess that maybe that perfect family is all bruised and crashed behind the walls, and the perfect life you think they’re enjoying is nothing like they have dreamed, and some of the perfect friends you think they have are maybe only sticking around for the day they’ll see them fall because they’re not really that perfect.  


I find myself drowning in details that happened weeks and months and even years ago and my heart would start aching about them all over again. I find myself feeling insecure about everything and everyone around me because I know that feeling as vulnerable as I am is nothing but a funny joke to a lot of people out there and maybe even to you, the one reading this.  


I know that mental health is one of the last things our society cares about and I am aware that most of the people I encounter and I know, either close or not have no clue how to deal with a person like me and I myself wouldn’t trust them enough to let them see that side of me.  


All that we are today is nothing but the cumulation of all we have experienced in our lives so far. Some are lucky enough to move on with their lives with no damages. Others, unfortunately, find themselves living with more than what they can take, holding a weight way heavier than their capacity and ability to resist.  
And even though we do have a word to say on our lives and the way they go maybe and we do have the power to make choices and take actions, we do not have a strong control over our feelings and all the damage they can do to us and how bad it can easily impact one's life.  


Rim.",11.30705882352941,6.654084105820108,10.246319638966698,71.10587535014007,59.7936507936508,13.191721132897605,39.96342981637099,9.987195323819016,3.7413299097416752,3780,115,755,49,34,1201,319,945,0.131,0.674,0.196,0.9975,1,2,1,0,2,1,47.0,10,39,22,15,39,61,2,1,38,0,74,21,5,20,20,214,143,83,1,14,23,0,10,3,2,11,13,1,2,3,56,78,1,8,40,5,1,8,27,25,1,5,5,19,136,35,116,120,33,85,0,12,6,2,96,40,0,16,32,567,192,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03677481852234825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05801592421483642,0.0,0.0,0.11079395433977456,0.03878379149788639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927812156186589,0.17702628023963402,0.045818005986992164,0.0,0.09348098686549676,0.08707395394038399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459544386962993,0.04261752973156666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861202186664455,0.0,0.045903448259821886,0.04557040146084828,0.1070201012879315,0.08554044834142316,0.0714636282931223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03465621327696676,0.046666144113260234,0.0,0.17146443070575135,0.0,0.1096043952177492,0.0,0.0349537277803137,0.07928326426970117,0.07456984834177904,0.0,0.07821858036633053,0.0,0.1887890239356418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11375230356852813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410393112560317,0.0,0.021674712499249092,0.0,0.09430975487207817,0.069592944176166,0.0,0.0,0.04570148460446469,0.0,0.0733718309533825,0.04416259758677201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22048828607782686,0.0,0.09832217309206584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04683262220435962,0.0,0.12990175549013416,0.0,0.07374929112759679,0.0,0.0,0.22799609887235944,0.033816611103120946,0.0,0.0,0.045074639113702034,0.2121111287079464,0.17581664914509632,0.0608038634875877,0.0,0.18316440385046795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03526989700119215,0.07488543410144702,0.0,0.2215377125992096,0.0,0.208391217138032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090405532879324,0.0,0.04188901390152889,0.0,0.03311371377266162,0.044093031724318985,0.0,0.06152265763036965,0.09598963689061182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15922766838792124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244789599539012,0.1893117452400412,0.044144008146992084,0.0,0.0,0.04492527401660898,0.0,0.14380577625902774,0.10867187374413667,0.0,0.0,0.03921766095170817,0.046769209541520036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04149720711643206,0.0,0.1328849068345061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04699552860837855,0.0,0.0,0.03299131675606744,0.0,0.0,0.19835373112502935,0.03776727847077512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03515093658357549,0.0319379345496696,0.0,0.0,0.029363990469117408,0.0,0.033130757553795805,0.034684137251148814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09357688284776217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02756144198191111,0.13291270561637245,0.040759765127755296,0.0,0.04838161760974531,0.0,0.07864771722138622,0.0,0.0,0.028166257494549023,0.0,0.0,0.12956510609966645,0.04990252641236019,0.03583056705634518,0.0,0.0,0.024469506116965304,0.16464820122354676,0.03327755109792254,0.05051874776451961,0.03730087866438952,0.0,0.03743464459843431,0.0,0.0477068300885268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178818008004606,0.09071681402399197,0.0,0.053431222439589705
mentalhealth,Espeon_341,2020/04/11,"Struggling and feeling helpless I have been suicidal and struggled with battling self harm ever since I was 15 (I’m 21 now) and I was clean for almost 2 years until I snapped and fell back into a vicious cycle of attempting to kill myself and repeatedly cutting up my body.  I keep overdosing and ending up in hospital and then I’m discharged immediately.  I have fucked up my liver and found out I have something called PBC which explains all the black vomit, bleeding and discomfort I’ve had lately.  But the thing is, I don’t feel scared, this could be the last few days for me ever and it’s not phasing me one bit.  It’s like as if I’ve already accepted it and it’s already happened.  But I also feel like my body has ran out of emotions to feel because I just feel nothing - absolutely nothing.  I can’t even cry anymore. 

I had never really had a proper diagnosis until last year where I was diagnosed with anxiety, depression, PTSD and then EUPD as of last week.   I feel like the list is honestly just getting longer and longer and I have no good qualities because they’re just being replaced with mental health disorders that I can’t control well.

I don’t know what the point in this was - I needed to vent I guess idk",5.194063807531382,6.131491782426777,6.0841605648535575,78.04749607740587,68.4142259414226,8.820188284518828,32.09231171548117,9.017664075816787,2.7748094142259405,972,41,179,17,16,321,143,239,0.185,0.718,0.098,-0.9711,0,0,1,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,2,11,19,5,4,7,0,22,8,3,1,4,47,40,24,2,3,7,0,6,3,0,0,4,0,1,1,10,20,0,2,10,0,0,2,7,12,1,1,10,7,25,7,23,27,3,31,0,2,1,1,3,10,1,3,22,123,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176441251124322,0.0,0.24633569638171,0.08925696799619118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538372772078608,0.0,0.11069021905806384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582359621414466,0.0,0.13607663828640965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12185261438532514,0.2479540194881908,0.0,0.0,0.11396946983547572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12518359948650254,0.08911399054066392,0.0,0.1226017662301924,0.07198122585834166,0.0,0.0961322126762722,0.11328496261153885,0.0,0.0,0.1279182998628271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12554973201967268,0.09885609164519643,0.0,0.0,0.07371941002008217,0.20192090555562686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3386096682261253,0.15947286377102374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12237802000401075,0.0,0.1031845266029768,0.05831324609291911,0.0,0.0,0.09361578568149737,0.0,0.0,0.12295442989816965,0.0,0.09869910926894374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11863952231991733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920686520872836,0.1234833752420744,0.0,0.061339649244390275,0.27293875736803663,0.12590445560535754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635855910464694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11247976855703606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275971076466282,0.08608291526459871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2141915887426014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563193551053247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551047052388132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304697589929092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07150221969074459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11174419950008366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643682119406558,0.0,0.0,0.09232752237029078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08592522909630053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333645238745127,0.0,0.12208663261772802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415079434260431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895293087098653,0.0,0.10035359486839876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375037377188926
mentalhealth,SardonicSam,2020/04/11,"Restraint I absolutely hate the feeling I get in my chest when I refrain from starting a fight. I refuse to start a fight because I’m the long run it’s not worth it, but it’s so unsatisfying and it builds up my anger. ***tw: self harm**I have no release but my skin. But, just a couple of days ago my mother forced me to show her my body. I will never forgive her for violating me like that. That was the last straw. I made a promise to myself to never forgive her past “mistakes” if she did that. She had told me that she should have sent me somewhere years ago and that she regrets not having done it. She’s called me manipulative and psycho. She had threatened to punch me in the face. I am filled with anger and I take it out on myself. She tries controlling that as well- the fact that I hate myself. I’ve been spiraling deeper into my ***tw: eating disorder) anorexia and bulimia. I want her to watch me fade away into skin and bone. I’ve wanted to kill myself since I was 8- I’m 16 now. My eating disorder started up at around 10 years old. She takes control of everything. Food is the only thing I have left to control. I want to waste away in cigarettes and drugs. I want to disappoint her. I want her to leave me alone.",0.582298387096774,3.023650616935484,2.32524193548387,92.1953629032258,89.20161290322581,5.035483870967743,19.846774193548384,6.6274283507984215,0.27575967741935514,955,30,201,12,32,313,135,248,0.258,0.685,0.057,-0.9958,0,1,2,0,2,1,36.0,0,0,0,3,6,16,8,0,10,0,15,10,6,5,3,40,34,14,1,9,7,1,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,14,12,3,5,3,1,1,3,5,11,1,0,10,4,48,5,30,22,0,34,0,2,1,0,24,14,0,1,18,138,62,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20433199172227287,0.0,0.0,0.11936871106125625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026007753433916,0.0,0.0,0.2165704450466446,0.0,0.0,0.07025796043905047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12802156131486914,0.0,0.0,0.11768754142951394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3878025423509759,0.0,0.12752670695233628,0.0,0.07432949817683449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641828594347539,0.0,0.0,0.11794517929720127,0.0,0.0,0.1336584141333157,0.23586787425009825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10358314633724117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05827604447536555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393659747248629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021562244131514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275795490209583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751182277707038,0.0,0.0,0.0939476492018458,0.0,0.12203767777080195,0.1252241500616559,0.0,0.0,0.05630743640188528,0.0,0.0,0.10199644159485456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090564192239693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777824652725079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12094001532869035,0.0,0.0,0.08765609982505104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100232846000842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12023538617823827,0.0,0.0,0.095339560056949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24473279129123496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1733138020320912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656984536143067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11013043673231497,0.0,0.07825011413348094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33989990448908625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10362747032801478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14843999970526595
mentalhealth,sadballofnothing,2020/04/11,"My mom killed my hamster. So my mom accidentaly and reflexively killed my hamster - kicked her when she walked over her foot. I can't stop thinking about it. Puhica (my hammy) has just beaten a sickness and had a good life ahead of her, when mom just stopped it all.
I have a feeling that I will never move on, as her death wasn't natural and very unexpected. I am typing this as I want to open up to someone.",3.668943089430893,4.836622073170737,4.705853658536586,85.66577235772358,72.17073170731706,7.417886178861789,27.081300813008127,7.793537801064563,1.4220178861788613,318,11,67,4,6,104,57,82,0.221,0.6940000000000001,0.085,-0.934,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,6,4,3,0,3,0,7,3,1,0,2,13,10,8,3,1,2,3,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,2,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,2,1,15,1,10,7,1,12,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,6,49,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10037244250376824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665004743955425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43924302740390825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14021323490875154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6974763011218248,0.0,0.2109843400518501,0.0,0.0,0.15310287815850462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16819658044061736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3319259085632515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12719696687814586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637912490937116,0.11708613351336465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway_mentalhlth,2020/04/11,"Looking for teletherapy service. Hey everyone - first time poster here.

I'm 29M, Asian-American, military officer, pretty high-functioning member of society (as good as you can be in this virus, anyways). I have been seeing a girl for \~3 months who I really love spending time with. I have harbored inner concerns about our relationship, however, because I know she has been reluctant to progress to an exclusive relationship, and I have been suspicious of her maintaining an emotional relationship with someone else in her life that I knew she was dating at the same time as when we first met. This past Sunday, after she left me alone in her apartment, I looked at her messages with the other person and felt terrible afterwards. I ended up confessing the next morning, after which I acknowledged that I had some trust issues that may stem from self-esteem issues or past relationships (I looked at my most recent ex's phone as well when I felt I could not trust her, and I discovered emotional cheating). 

I'd like to speak with a therapist via teletherapy, but most modern teletherapy services are all about having text-based communications (i.e., BetterHelp) that seem more appropriate for people who are encountering crises or have immediate needs cropping up throughout their daily lives. I'm looking for a structured, once-a-week therapist to speak to just to help diagnose and sort through some of my trust issues. I don't need anything fancy, just normal therapy conducted via a virtual channel focused on my trust/insecurity/self-esteem issues. 

Could someone help point me to a service or even a particular therapist that can help? I prefer a more experienced hand, if possible, and would be open to an under-the-table arrangement for the right person. Thanks!",11.418044382801668,10.088661569579292,10.507824780397602,59.03832524271846,56.28155339805825,14.394914470642627,43.43065187239945,13.140968706690076,5.992527323162276,1431,66,216,43,14,458,187,309,0.022000000000000002,0.82,0.157,0.9896,1,1,0,0,0,0,52.0,2,1,1,3,10,10,1,0,14,0,22,4,1,0,1,41,39,16,0,8,8,1,3,1,0,2,2,2,0,3,11,11,0,0,8,1,1,0,2,2,1,2,9,11,33,8,39,24,8,34,1,0,5,1,33,15,0,11,20,148,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936066560291784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437522442288204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055094946386368485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14432251098912033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09173402606151597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550108079461773,0.2033311769471492,0.0800500532309517,0.0,0.0,0.059695286330376414,0.0,0.0,0.08636217831199318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17355837935559573,0.0,0.0,0.15375474672231088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07580664481413749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18173987939967648,0.09549167011367304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3773338942425353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04967060810784082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981983790991291,0.0,0.06383822590029516,0.04415521273787845,0.0,0.07980739466999577,0.0,0.303586505214858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157168189796275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721406334552195,0.0,0.0,0.13403158352379269,0.0,0.0,0.09612039481248608,0.0,0.08855343113047473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725563033260099,0.06265826820313163,0.15783305298604122,0.0,0.0,0.08543852625868878,0.10189012400387004,0.0,0.0919491812781236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057899886563575614,0.0,0.08923956880645237,0.3881381519218113,0.0,0.07718421846834164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202133789545721,0.08227876255337928,0.18857257209967124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15315774298785706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320996837283247,0.10335766419973187,0.3148152224423204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810430835019054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07249756498241322,0.0,0.08126267665896574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06420351882735748,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sketchie_,2020/04/11,"Police found my sex toys I had a loud mental breakdown, my neighbours heard me and thought it was a domestic violence case so they called the police. They came in, searched my flat and found my sex toys cause I forgot to put them away last night. I wanna cry. Posting here cause idk where this would fit",2.645988700564974,5.1083580338983055,2.4450000000000003,95.04738700564974,78.83050847457628,5.289265536723164,21.69774011299436,6.42735559955562,0.2481163841807912,240,7,49,2,6,71,46,59,0.141,0.818,0.040999999999999995,-0.7269,0,0,0,0,1,0,5.0,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,3,2,0,2,0,11,9,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,1,3,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,2,11,0,4,0,0,9,0,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,2,28,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150153390583629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23368494826671302,0.2617473666273957,0.0,0.4701910442631614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513847562884082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5018519664065022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865460972065725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306304393119239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21476344926802568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21917833334644216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300609156429557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18168406715501398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16257091673046914,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pejansa,2020/04/11,"I have strong mood swings over seemingly small things and I often feel a lot of resentment Hi everyone!

Before I say anything, I just want to make clear that I'm not looking for someone to diagnose me here. I know this is not the place to do that, but currently I am not able to seek out professional help for several reasons, so I just wanted to see if someone can relate to what I've been feeling. And vent.

I have decided to share my thoughts here because I just saw someone online posted something like: ""Apparently, you are feeling okay. But then you start reading and you cannot focus, you watch a movie and you lose track. You have plenty of time don't want to do anything. You are tired, irascible... That's anxiety and it's coming to you"". And that hit me very hard.

Basically, I have been feeling quite irascible for a long period of time (years), but in the last year I feel like it has got way worse. Right now I am in a relationship and I get very often very insecure about certain issues, even if I know my partner is super caring and would never do anything to hurt me. I think that the best way to put into words what I feel is to say that I get extremely easily triggered over things that deep inside I know are completely inoffensive and then my thoughts become very negative and I make myself very angry. We have a long-distance relationship and my day starts before hers, so when she wakes up and we start texting, some days I have had this episode in the morning and I really can't help being distant because I feel very resentful. Sometimes I do my best to not let that feeling control me so I am loving with her, but other times it's just very hard to control. 

I feel very ashamed of myself and she (or anyone close to me) doesn't deserve that I act like this sometimes. I just feel very angry sometimes over things that my mind thinks about non stop. When I feel that way, I just wanna isolate myself and I don't let anyone reach me. I can't even focus on my readings for uni and I just want to scream lol.

I don't know if someone can relate to this or not... I'd like to hear your thoughts on this. Please, don't be too harsh :( Thank you for reading <3",4.1495391705069125,5.2800698064516185,4.8782949308755805,85.02315668202766,70.9815668202765,7.8119815668202754,27.59447004608295,8.155646560271837,1.6920903225806452,1712,59,346,24,31,552,195,434,0.136,0.685,0.179,0.951,2,0,1,0,1,0,51.0,2,10,0,8,22,22,2,2,9,2,38,4,1,6,3,88,81,32,0,9,21,0,13,4,1,1,2,4,0,1,25,23,0,3,23,3,0,3,15,7,0,0,8,21,65,14,42,67,4,44,0,2,4,1,27,16,0,10,25,237,90,4,0.06499172506472005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049718491784336634,0.0,0.0,0.09088745059625593,0.0,0.1604479562232112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923670473614125,0.07177825419347153,0.11060634232667987,0.0,0.13640961156925746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06626339517489845,0.0,0.0,0.055984616382634605,0.06814258721104469,0.0,0.1457874920372723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382857207095691,0.0,0.0,0.06596523287562576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858528429073805,0.0,0.0,0.06210237845853031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36147945873120335,0.0464301013721967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791098782357324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051979819641330784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164396399644326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325039760264207,0.0,0.08712516668822841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957498587261271,0.0,0.0,0.06783447558729183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14287100966049185,0.052976930257739765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291688440553728,0.0,0.1270066960311418,0.0,0.0,0.11503126302391975,0.0545766804701402,0.07270911610798166,0.0,0.05525364052394291,0.058657569317269516,0.0,0.08676496229943312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562311525716369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05012562498267198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790251990908276,0.07134139747231724,0.0,0.0,0.062244107239853866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533463452495752,0.0,0.06912669959589665,0.19502793824559012,0.0,0.041635363284691564,0.06682231772305641,0.0,0.13955358049077532,0.0,0.05550257809651826,0.0,0.10336805669660272,0.0,0.0,0.05178999036957186,0.0591660255804354,0.0,0.07342215016407909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202691109648713,0.05003380516322496,0.19283543376934487,0.0,0.13800443253414588,0.0,0.0,0.05433599229091305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059835648525951565,0.0,0.0,0.12953284277001578,0.08328814634126615,0.0,0.15478851016575276,0.1136915926045393,0.07469842729291368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4826248169621927,0.15333521328282002,0.15476221872174176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06623212023935775,0.046168256782289,0.0,0.0,0.08370508020854532
mentalhealth,livethebestlife,2020/04/11,I’m slipping how do I stop I am going into week 5 of social isolation and my mental health is slipping. I am trying soooo hard to not fall back into old habits. But I’m not eating as much and I don’t want to lose all my progress because of something that’s out of my control. Is anyone feeling like this? What are your tips?,1.7265217391304333,3.356273173913049,3.4312318840579716,90.9451086956522,78.13043478260869,5.179710144927537,23.09420289855073,5.46131890053228,0.2728724637681159,255,8,54,1,6,85,51,69,0.135,0.7490000000000001,0.11699999999999999,-0.3094,0,1,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,3,2,2,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,1,14,12,5,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,5,1,2,1,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,2,8,1,9,12,2,9,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,5,36,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18231880607381032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20049663361492395,0.0,0.15894759188361934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924474315690131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2668069951111446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184039041238127,0.18627611606510613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14818726187760936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23357609877610766,0.0,0.0,0.27715949794825456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12738672408493654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917067021359569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26276940072752064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916774079136512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2736077745316789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26579645704827765,0.0,0.2007340630822932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21799430342307616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17702858335782418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537940212394319,0.0,0.20915372692388848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,breebree00,2020/04/11,"COVID-19 How is everyone maintaining normalcy in their lives with everything happening right now? I feel like I’m going to lose my mind. I thrive off of schedule and now that is gone. I gained weight, eat maybe once a day, sleep half my day away and have absolutely no motivation to do anything at all. I already have anxiety. I’m afraid this quarantine stuff is gonna make me slip into a depression.",4.734912280701753,6.620625473684214,5.3421052631578965,79.32307017543863,70.57894736842105,10.329824561403509,31.08771929824561,10.504223727775694,3.55352456140351,320,14,61,10,6,103,61,76,0.135,0.7659999999999999,0.099,-0.4243,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,3,3,4,0,1,2,0,6,3,1,3,1,10,14,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,2,0,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,1,1,2,8,1,9,12,1,13,0,2,0,0,1,6,0,0,6,36,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24190650644170725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16769700521112865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1803932553411009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20595741225349945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827479270369485,0.0,0.18880745313495584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243091711051396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094669912586649,0.19701411028729165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084045483612573,0.1566054936972057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458354724268016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19384893917413792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10709618193251674,0.0,0.1935687029723209,0.0,0.0,0.2452427775916181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14632608324067606,0.0,0.22022847651754085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213421909294128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334542176522433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18720632493552794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21937086853229368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509459302993192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669418368141872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ashawatt,2020/04/11,"Finally looking for help but I have no idea where to start Hi everyone, after about 5 years of I guess disregarding my emotional wellbeing and now realizing through the help of friends that my lack of focus, sadness and frequent panic over small things might be a bigger thing than I thought, I'm considering reaching out for professional help. I have no idea how to go about this though.

I'm currently a sophomore in college and struggled hard my first year and I genuinely can't afford messing up again. I have tried using campus resources but they haven't worked out for me and now we can't be on campus due to the current circumstances. What are the best ways of getting help? I'm scared to talk to anyone about it,  my parents disregard mental health, and it's hard to know which online resources are genuine. I live in the Florida by the way. Thank you in advance.",6.773272727272726,7.31521447878788,6.649848484848487,76.77477272727275,64.81818181818181,9.751515151515152,35.28787878787879,9.642632912329526,3.348042424242424,699,31,126,13,10,221,107,165,0.16899999999999998,0.674,0.157,-0.0516,4,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,1,1,4,9,8,0,3,7,0,11,1,0,2,0,23,23,10,0,1,2,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,8,9,0,2,5,0,0,2,5,5,0,1,1,3,15,3,28,19,2,28,0,1,1,0,11,11,0,2,13,88,23,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10466715690412058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15709106288803498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16838179152074326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430357953181677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639787494313821,0.0,0.12732675872254526,0.0,0.0,0.11565059607511355,0.0,0.07820716690161597,0.0,0.08507262483858362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649010861960374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681867735548219,0.0,0.0,0.15911412148822973,0.0,0.0,0.4013378494931675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33796496274666343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08226604601120174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13217955350378754,0.0,0.12570241415286298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15085293002859312,0.15879808470000695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756296813997616,0.1662137107520653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986641708583778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595178614688827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564891297466831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031564433641932,0.0,0.13781500463791374,0.0,0.0,0.19889558333963636,0.0,0.14707026699096756,0.11883762590755527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163010009689416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12928462779158947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376348817284083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089765488773644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19279169360309306
mentalhealth,callaberries,2020/04/11,"Coronavirus woes I was fine and thought that social distancing would be good for me. I needed time for myself because I had a horrible 2019. I have depression and anxiety that comes and goes. The last time it affected me hard was fall last year. I thought I was doing better and that 2020 would be a good year, but all I’ve seen is negativity on the news. I’m a healthcare worker and I’m surrounded by death or people near dying. The news I read affects me and I had to turn off notifications to get my mind off things, but it doesn’t stop my coworkers from talking about it. I have chronic conditions (asthma and hypertension) and I’m so afraid of being near anyone in the event I will become infected. It doesn’t help that I am directly caring for COVID positive patients. Some days we have enough protective equipment and some days we don’t. I’m on edge constantly and I feel like I have no one. All I’ve had are fights with my family telling me that I should have moved back home a long time ago (they live in another state). They now refuse to talk to me. My friends don’t check up on me much. The person I’m talking to has suddenly gone radio silent. I feel like if I don’t reach out to people, no one will reach out to me. I feel so alone in this and it doesn’t help that I can’t leave the house to busy myself. I used to go to the gym to help release my anxiety, but I don’t have that right now. I’m in a master’s program as well and that is adding stress to my life. I’m so overwhelmed by a lot of things and, mentally, I’m having a hard time coping. This is getting more and more difficult and the thought of social distancing carrying on through summer is daunting. I don’t know what to do. 

And no...I would never think of ending things. I’m stronger than that. It’s just very difficult to cope right now and to continue to be strong when I feel like I have no one.",2.341932208684785,4.020124180412374,3.7150421743205264,89.36910184317402,76.5257731958763,7.486535457669477,23.613245860668545,8.296473431620573,1.2444491408934717,1474,46,324,27,33,484,182,388,0.151,0.7140000000000001,0.135,-0.6778,0,1,0,0,1,0,38.0,2,0,2,4,11,19,1,3,15,0,42,4,0,3,3,57,70,27,2,6,6,0,6,3,1,6,4,0,1,1,21,23,0,3,9,3,1,5,14,8,1,3,11,7,42,11,46,49,9,49,0,3,1,0,17,18,0,5,28,215,63,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713869770055499,0.0,0.0,0.10181111572787443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307810680104153,0.15040135946124406,0.0,0.0,0.06873496981232861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558808855635073,0.0,0.0599239220853602,0.10856671856902443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08694003669106219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002253322571834,0.0,0.0,0.08467837730666215,0.0,0.10622942486354432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679317844008706,0.0,0.08466727712925197,0.0,0.10202184594809466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706630040259612,0.10157213409895137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267027687663784,0.0,0.19881756468659514,0.21068067782282573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594779933960154,0.0,0.10271736455045892,0.0,0.055867231642607054,0.16490192931810824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761183768585844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19766906199664624,0.0,0.09860481457738868,0.0,0.0,0.11342718723721748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05402415004297281,0.16025832733240228,0.0,0.10408751191347083,0.0,0.0,0.0694335347581606,0.14407601974298992,0.0,0.08680237324314133,0.08699408267645778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357275484171021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09906518814794003,0.0,0.09925689006789944,0.0,0.0,0.10447935616028893,0.07226320274013008,0.07288960871050411,0.07581648065613131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1998357220359452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13630031166477555,0.08583342202843255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832849573788173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16789856046981036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004128026599845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08218478492547092,0.11260448727697735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370340159995998,0.0859201880556743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19592223082707785,0.06298788432214611,0.0,0.2341221698648157,0.2292824993057363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10692423240865444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08490127420383957,0.0,0.0811093574328548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838520815340163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20949253491433253,0.0,0.0,0.12660639336955767
mentalhealth,ImproveOrEnjoy,2020/04/11,Is it normal to get random sad feelings when adjusting to anti depressants? Sometimes even when I'm having a good day and there's nothing to trigger me I suddenly feel sad and apathetic about life. I've been on anti-depressants for about a month now. Has anyone else has these random bouts of sadness as a side effect of taking anti-depressants? I feel like my mood is more stable now but I occasionally 'forget' and go right back to the misery and 'what's the point of it all?'. Are those just cause I'm not fully adjusted to the anti-depressants?,3.2876415094339637,5.648460971698118,4.908150943396231,78.75335849056606,76.0754716981132,7.636226415094339,23.807547169811322,8.548686976883017,1.8778860377358493,437,14,77,9,10,147,71,106,0.16399999999999998,0.784,0.052000000000000005,-0.8925,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,10,7,0,0,6,0,7,1,0,3,1,20,15,8,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,6,0,0,1,1,4,0,0,1,3,5,2,13,14,2,13,0,4,0,0,0,4,0,2,9,52,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422480173165754,0.19668849841522207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760748753440714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19719859869265668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380007791896053,0.0,0.6613488602300815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16036022588023566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678957041641345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911863670744204,0.13713821017487293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10029260163223934,0.0,0.10909684125853072,0.16100922738690754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13558895074644572,0.0937832917610474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322281686922518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18808271443400493,0.18419341334992728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146682438875075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16393511957321633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18985604499282213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14433208027961125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hannahxlandonh,2020/04/11,"Lockdown How is everyone else managing with the lockdown?

I'm still working 5 days a week in a care home. 

I haven't been able to start my new job as an activities support worker due to the virus.

I haven't been able to see my boyfriend in a month, neither my sister or her son, the only things I look forward to during the week. I feel lost and lonely and angry at all those people that aren't complying with the rules.

I'm finding it difficult to see some positives. :(
Anxieties are high and I'm getting myself wound up and depressed. I've been doing some art and playing video games but I don't have the motivation to do anything for too long at the moment...
Not sure what to do",2.6821739130434783,4.54928642028986,4.029782608695651,86.65380434782612,76.10144927536231,6.918840579710146,25.99275362318841,7.793537801064563,1.4664231884057974,538,20,109,8,12,177,90,138,0.132,0.812,0.055999999999999994,-0.7991,1,4,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,4,3,8,0,0,11,0,13,1,0,2,2,18,25,9,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,5,7,0,0,3,4,0,1,6,4,0,0,4,4,10,4,16,21,4,17,0,3,3,0,4,7,0,3,11,70,15,5,0.3762843362476997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392824364698528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15482497361428016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19182347942046493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213361338266562,0.0,0.16204657371765227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15716863959176147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17977790429782445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09513033324305244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719585331824363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982965175630892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19878253034466706,0.1887219348029531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18670207105013367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16649989830084785,0.15799203640816575,0.0,0.20537940145902991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501732836154716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18170887836207011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309059686898165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043409006886633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29984989829217185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13316799496048584,0.0,0.15025057849685267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135015028013816,0.1773217668856274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12499329649391415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30183259741663154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13696973915657026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hamsternern,2020/04/11,"How do you take control of persistent negative thoughts? I don't have the worst thoughts like ""I'm going to murder you"" but they're still pretty negative and persistent and I'd rather have a clear mind.",8.126153846153844,7.407426871794872,7.4457692307692325,76.4117307692308,62.33333333333334,11.902564102564106,37.44871794871795,11.20814326018867,4.098733333333334,164,7,31,4,2,51,30,39,0.214,0.5429999999999999,0.242,0.0892,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,2,0,3,3,3,1,0,2,0,4,0,0,2,1,10,9,4,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,0,3,1,2,7,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,20,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4068875717055421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061757041926521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723552760357258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3663034412844383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3690767328715579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28971583176544663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727647101965234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5760121132400008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,squareUp434234,2020/04/11,"I can't focus on anything!!!!!!  (this post might be a bit chaotic sorry about that)

not sure if this is the best place to ask this but

I  keep wanting to do so much stuff FL studio, learning programming,  skating but I keep just thinking about what I want to to constantly and I  have been doing this for over a year now I have not learned anything  yet because I keep thinking of what I should. I keep thinking about  these things way too much which lead up to me doing absolutely nothing! I  don't know what to do and googled how to stop this behaviour but they  keep giving these optimistic hipster responses like ask yourself 1.2.3  bro thats not gonna work 😂

Does  anyone else have this and how are u able to focus on things, I'm just  really bummed out and dissapointed in myself because I really wanna do  these things but idk I just cant focus on doing it? Sorry if this looks a  bit like a rant or it just looks really confusing.",3.3984504504504507,5.097150502702707,4.33675675675676,85.93720720720722,73.70270270270271,7.311711711711713,25.30630630630631,8.021203637495839,1.421944144144144,733,24,147,11,15,237,105,185,0.091,0.8109999999999999,0.098,0.6483,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,3,13,5,0,1,5,0,18,0,0,3,1,41,36,14,0,6,14,1,0,2,0,3,0,0,1,0,22,5,0,6,6,0,0,1,6,1,0,0,1,2,15,4,21,31,5,16,0,0,2,0,5,8,0,5,7,108,37,5,0.1179059719535668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824425970403306,0.1208086017495629,0.19405313735579272,0.0,0.2204523352806481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14374877227845692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237350433448684,0.0,0.2574455679885813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274144688178857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10318031061089006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849531020333438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310615200643714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5240012266225029,0.0,0.0,0.06479803867812707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520580447165188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19802264212630485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12507960371648882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17334891164176175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313396003109585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12318664568457255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11292132891054575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2266007543652459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639721649958339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857467203312203,0.0,0.0,0.1349741291301922,0.0,0.0,0.11112498320637447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349944660108407,0.22664815798008375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390879941932207,0.09358827246548868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08583695183554517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07592758023895912
mentalhealth,idkrandomidhere,2020/04/11,"Handling outbursts of child-like anger and frustration. Information:

I'm male. I'm 31. I live alone. I have 1 or 2 trustworthy friends that I consider ""best"" friends.

I've been undergoing therapy, specifically EMDR to deal with traumatic memories for the past 9 months. I'm also going to go through orientation for a nearby hospital's outpatient treatment program in the next two weeks. I've been prescribed Seroquel and Buspar by my doctor to treat what he diagnosed as bipolar and anxiety.

I've had a history of self-harm through some cutting, but mainly bludgeoning myself or hitting myself until marks/bruises/bumps appear. My therapist is aware of this.

I have a history of intense emotional outbursts, such as crying and rage, especially when I'm attempting to get something right. This happens whenever I fail, or perceive that I have failed at something. I've dealt with thoughts of self-loathing/self-hatred and worthlessness, so this manifests itself fairly broadly. Practicing any of the instruments that I've played, writing, trying to remember the definition of a word, forgetting information about paying rent that a friend told me about previously, constantly losing in a video game, not being able to debug a coding example, not being able to solve a math problem, etc. Those are just some examples I can think of right now. I'm sure there have been other times where I've had the same reaction, I just can't think of them right now.

I've attempted to control these outbursts with my therapist by naming the property of myself that comes out at these times as ""madness"", and then imagining that I've put the part into a room where it's not necessarily restrained, but that it can't get to me or my other ""parts"" and that I could view it through a one-way mirror as an exercise to exert control over it. I also gave it a description, which resembles me in some way, but slightly taller with blackened muscle fibers wrapping it together without skin over the muscle, dripping a tar-like substance on the ground, and it was heavily breathing constantly. During the session it seemed like it had lessened in intensity, but it was staring at me. There is no skin on it, so it's just staring without really giving me a tell on what it's feeling or thinking as I'm trying to connect with it. This was all discussed during our session, and was instructed to check in with the ""madness"" on daily basis to try and connect with it to see why it's there, where it came from, and what I can do to get it to function properly as a part of myself.

I did this yesterday, but it seemed like that part of me was just shut down. Shut down as if you were to see some automaton in a deactivated state. No breath, no movement, eye-sockets seemingly empty.

I went about my day. I finished a simple programming problem regarding design patterns. I read some news. I sat down to play a game. I lost. I played again. I lost. I played again. I lost. I got enraged. I didn't react. I lost again. I didn't react. I lost again, and again, and again.

And then I started crying and screaming, while hitting myself. I kept saying, ""I can't do it, I can't do it, I can't do it,"" much in the manner that a small child would when they're failing at something difficult over and over again, or at least how I did as a child. I got on the phone with my therapist's voicemail and just kept hitting myself over and over. I still have headaches from the blows and marks on my face. She called back while I was on the phone with someone else, but left me a voicemail saying that she was taking her break over the weekend with her family, but that she would check in on me over the next few days. This makes sense right now; I'm not the only one that she treats and she needs time away from her job like anyone else does.

I'm looking at the ""madness"" part of me right now through the same window that I was before. It's still ""deactivated"". I can't get a read on it or connect with it right now.

I don't talk with my best friends about this because they have their own problems that they deal with, and the times that I've spoken with them about it they tend to downplay what I'm saying, more than likely because I'm not communicating it well enough, or because I am and I don't understand how common it is to deal with.

I haven't been able to find others that deal with this kind of anger and frustration in themselves that are also my age. Most are younger. I think this is good, because they're developing themselves before it affects larger parts of their lives.

I don't know how to manage this in myself. I don't often feel happy or joy. When I do get something right, it's usually accompanied by a feeling that whatever task or problem I'm facing that I solved is now solved and that's it. I still try every day to do what I need to do, but there aren't celebrations. I set up a bench and a rack in my garage to lift, and I do it when I'm supposed to, but it doesn't make me feel accomplished. It's just something that I'm doing because I said I would do it. I don't fully understand the feeling of ""reward"" when completing a task.

I hope this is the appropriate place to post this kind of long piece. Really the only thing that I can say to close is that I don't know what to do about the child in me that won't grow up, and I don't know how to feel accomplished. I do know that I'm at least curious to know if there is anyone else that is dealing with something similar and how they manage, or if they are able to do something that allows them to feel the sting of failure, but balance it with a feeling of reward and how they were able to feel that.",5.543733259952301,6.021595938517178,6.046114474408367,80.26431388736013,67.4629294755877,9.160237964200537,31.309274838168626,9.124624562755848,2.550227208637995,4452,169,868,76,69,1442,396,1106,0.10300000000000001,0.8109999999999999,0.086,-0.9703,2,1,7,0,0,0,138.0,1,1,11,19,56,52,10,0,53,0,80,10,6,14,2,164,158,82,0,14,37,0,11,4,4,4,4,6,3,4,92,52,0,5,30,11,4,9,29,26,1,2,37,23,107,26,145,111,27,127,0,10,6,0,55,64,0,26,53,621,199,18,0.2323504926082653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048129007419992716,0.0,0.11148636299574537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0316012605223026,0.0,0.03554949817481158,0.0,0.0,0.06498594673989642,0.09522821503521828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043660187263193984,0.03573263733515538,0.0,0.14163870369469622,0.0,0.07908526231488851,0.0,0.09753500284245954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04745116625909698,0.05314941293327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04002987513267646,0.048723014169330434,0.10043533539391897,0.10424033384942953,0.03710259236320847,0.0,0.10209044231663056,0.0899081075134017,0.2395431554032281,0.0,0.04716617181158863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04756411494358746,0.04066629637276637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11645941320611625,0.05227260613259562,0.0,0.0480160340132144,0.051826443667426655,0.0,0.0,0.03915306224340752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04380787315335709,0.0,0.21147010274501826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04247282817197318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361073137506275,0.0,0.12139354247489167,0.04457835290322798,0.05282005578739223,0.03897691388107157,0.07433276582411033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041093354652840655,0.049468283984270514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04615529317732159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04611440232890865,0.0,0.0,0.09678291319775374,0.12769375424716814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05048989801344925,0.0,0.0,0.0908117713693468,0.0,0.08206789673258298,0.041124574862942714,0.039023178964808385,0.0519881536548775,0.2536380098967673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06203830321886439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0370919892893829,0.0,0.0341608693314805,0.06891397846665084,0.0,0.0,0.09884295393910307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0629786828277492,0.07068520789711047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30193552932544643,0.04436096724016763,0.0,0.0,0.04855136229883632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0445055088620582,0.0,0.0,0.17786243344532854,0.0,0.04671528414159736,0.0,0.0,0.09296534798055557,0.0,0.059539870095699776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052641562820718704,0.2777964716043101,0.044203705239577284,0.14781955007039754,0.0,0.0,0.07406130403563968,0.12691389719781346,0.14543534252996615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0393739636762271,0.25042466515899225,0.0,0.0,0.032891774913910515,0.0,0.1113332421217966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379751790563181,0.0,0.03493973081316558,0.037350904935658236,0.040616914360428184,0.0,0.05314260756875446,0.16186609819850956,0.030872668581106225,0.11910465100934825,0.0,0.03689206746581691,0.10838835260243586,0.0,0.0,0.044404170569761744,0.0,0.12620058607528864,0.0,0.04539453388624631,0.0967540228341736,0.0,0.0,0.051180248275532816,0.0,0.0,0.07377160240289264,0.03727551000093765,0.0,0.04178219940544285,0.04307824689356722,0.041932035954340315,0.0,0.0,0.08959103337108136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099033074092562,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FantasticCar3,2020/04/11,"Are there any good books on grief but for the loss of your own life?  Hi I've been very ill for almost a decade and missed out on a great deal while also never managing to progress because of it. The grief is really hard to deal with. My mood is shifting all over the place, Im really not doing well. Most books/resources I see are just about dealing with the loss of another. But what about the loss of ones own life? I have very little memories at all and basically might have well been in a coma to be honest. So im feeling that loss heavily and cant seem to move past it.",2.8991666666666696,4.029591250000006,4.065000000000001,89.66666666666669,74.0,7.666666666666668,22.5,8.167268648758528,0.9197499999999996,450,11,101,7,9,147,79,120,0.24600000000000002,0.655,0.099,-0.9593,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,5,8,13,0,0,8,0,12,4,0,0,3,18,16,8,2,0,4,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,2,1,0,1,3,7,2,1,2,3,4,5,20,12,5,12,0,7,1,0,5,8,0,4,3,68,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621001042828863,0.0,0.0,0.12945591083119892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11008440461417196,0.16974599387626627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09868095201803444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5006755782419593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185172915264474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577782301650335,0.0,0.1784740067422685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501328093577845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3497177982201002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286822048180489,0.0,0.1622469558073322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717298057874459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17205353009841512,0.0,0.0,0.12485234993708373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969452939360752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15453341373190296,0.0,0.0,0.16913084236314851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20740980081046045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289979327558561,0.1473700793298557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671370074089515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2911003212528587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,latex55,2020/04/11,"38 y.o. Male looking for encouragement Hi there

39 in great shape, workout everyday and eat right. Don’t do drugs or really drink

About 2 years ago I was loving life and then started feeling pain in my chest and neck. Turns out it’s a chronic condition known as Thoracic outlet syndrome where it compresses your nerves. It’s been a massive pain and nerve pain where it’s hard to sleep and sit still

I’m working on it and debating major surgery but my quality of life sucks. 

Knowing when I wake up it’s a 50/50 chance I’ll be in massive pain all day has taken a toll

I don’t know if it’s a midlife crisis or what but I’ve started getting midday anxiety and shortness of breath and panic attacks

I haven’t been to mental doctor yet and debating on if I want to dive into pills 

I’ve taken 2mg of Valium for plane rides and random things and it takes the edge off but I’m so scared of the side effects and dependence of them if I start

My biggest fears are sexual side effects and weight gain since I’m such a health but

I can’t keep going like this and being in constant pain. I feel like if I fix my mental pain it will help with my muscle and nerve pain. When tense up it makes my muscles hurt even more

Thanks so much",2.707762092979486,4.356358620553365,3.75363071710898,89.60903820816868,75.44268774703558,6.716280820628648,24.300583474496516,7.447530270364453,0.9967532091097308,973,31,205,12,21,314,153,253,0.21899999999999997,0.6729999999999999,0.109,-0.9876,0,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,1,4,12,19,2,3,8,0,13,23,5,4,1,41,36,31,0,5,10,0,4,2,0,1,14,0,0,1,13,18,3,1,7,2,0,2,4,13,0,0,5,5,17,6,24,28,4,35,0,1,1,1,7,19,1,8,15,115,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884745698194413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07635353711803275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354703531787518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785796569127386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06436848503908106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10215864083293297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09777472666888563,0.11574663951073146,0.10212942443622644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592283868999482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231276368396048,0.10093275991249646,0.07130349979025104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052146032023672885,0.0,0.05672369930944305,0.0,0.0,0.11003966721060167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08940917205010201,0.0,0.0,0.10609219593623156,0.0,0.0,0.06689980337195378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684749427545452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871473836149088,0.0,0.0,0.10970472501983533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099595887654304,0.09752317630346513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381434046977022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900814311815206,0.0,0.06662321735553499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011677965532686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337102739564305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7434259641488913,0.11710424189257004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06394013860617538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523625727066217,0.0,0.0,0.09992612306826494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0825629554306732,0.0,0.09988098315773636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21193576441650194,0.0,0.07970751835479394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504387320514548,0.0,0.0,0.09189062754608984,0.0,0.0,0.06630859976837666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856342492216768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588698765726622,0.0,0.0,0.12154035440219835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07266206963790396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427366075779234
mentalhealth,ThomasC21,2020/04/11,"Not sure if I should get help I'm 15 and when I'm older I'd like to join the police/military/ border force / etc. I want to because I'd like to protect and serve my community.

I've come to the realisation that I have OCD and anxiety. I sometimes zone/space out and imagine myself working in a situation when I have to use a weapon. (for clarification, I never visualise a body or person, etc).

Should I seek help about this before considering a future in this line of work? I'm willing to get any and all the help I could possibly need.",2.2118348623853197,4.19501683486239,4.6830183486238495,80.90177522935781,77.89908256880733,7.662752293577981,24.661467889908266,8.548686976883017,1.7500488073394491,421,15,86,9,10,148,69,109,0.057,0.757,0.18600000000000005,0.9069,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,3,4,1,0,7,0,6,1,1,1,3,21,15,9,0,6,3,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,10,3,12,11,3,9,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,7,52,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13508145945000966,0.0,0.15195843510039525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108860528638775,0.0,0.1690273184979835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206433578391645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711100717234803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15859722817904215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4430704049769718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075615543720757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3994309816928688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194090147181859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14728844093437196,0.1532027874827004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17344407706784595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22393583835373884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22327876993798748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19645923609672064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18721508386683788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17156048073314809,0.0,0.0,0.11716253963069385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892233892521027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,elegantmushroom,2020/04/11,"I can't bring myself to finish my university degree I have two assignments left and then my degree is finished (after seven long years of work). As a result of my poor mental health, I don't think I'll ever be able to have a job or live a happy, independent life afterwards. So it feels like the end of my degree is the end of everything for me. As soon as school is over, I'll be left sitting around the house doing nothing for the rest of my life and that sounds horrible. While I'm in school, I feel like I'm being productive and contributing something to the world. I don't want that feeling to go away. Unless my mental health improves significantly, I don't think a full time job will ever be in the cards for me. And a part time job won't pay me enough to allow me to live independently. I don't know what to do. I know I need to finish, but it's hard when it feels like there is nothing for me at the end.",4.1846684118673645,4.382054408376966,5.568285340314136,83.49005453752184,70.36125654450262,8.460907504363004,24.817190226876093,8.344100000000001,1.2829682373472946,716,17,156,10,12,242,99,191,0.046,0.873,0.081,0.7237,3,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,12,0,19,4,0,4,2,24,33,14,0,2,3,0,5,3,0,2,4,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,8,0,2,2,6,0,0,2,0,6,21,4,28,27,4,31,0,0,0,0,0,10,0,1,21,106,27,8,0.11630878310379016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10353947585635287,0.0,0.0,0.10927593037702582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3090451786624657,0.12017806424371877,0.0,0.0,0.21041590624175366,0.0,0.0,0.10453083462005852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2352368617007529,0.24927305366682426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661009617748424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12381286236701836,0.10418982428778636,0.0,0.0,0.2472615951908652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420471978563436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34625556147259645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278405309127736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527396663143488,0.0,0.16430466633113408,0.1704677893228503,0.0,0.2054055727126677,0.10292961302289562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23442379450176665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624148892822094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232028285066273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259510778932323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354213958612262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895401835663199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14905194374016706,0.0,0.0,0.1356411735165544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361678076522524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860193373127592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08467417933048038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489904298559638
mentalhealth,blahblahbloopboom,2020/04/11,"I get extremely nauseous sometimes ill just be going about my day and all of the sudden i just feel extremely nauseous. This usually happens after i get an anxiety attack or i just feel very anxious. Actually, nauseous is an understatement. Honestly i know exactly how to describe it because i had a failed suicide attempt where i tried to overdose myself. This feels exactly the same but without the puking and the shivering :( Is this normal or is there actually skmething wrong with my body?",6.3853201970443365,8.78482345977012,7.160591133004927,65.86137931034483,67.27586206896552,10.028899835796388,40.014778325123146,10.290406445055957,5.122712315270936,399,24,56,11,7,132,60,87,0.21,0.737,0.053,-0.9182,0,0,1,0,0,1,8.0,0,0,0,2,7,4,1,0,7,0,5,2,1,1,3,20,13,6,1,1,7,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,1,3,10,1,7,11,2,6,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,4,46,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.4218987980454458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536840936303576,0.2442090206057468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24592302239225006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177438972024755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401146148831776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394108824004597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3279040616065064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258783730482109,0.0,0.12285361336291435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911572045522238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188006250980532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21179935929186106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21379630131441968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364533943341532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467643092831364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380792045646077,0.1783617577816564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083788441810389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23634646088807784,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,axe_aye,2020/04/11,"Survey on Mental Health of Youth Hi fellow redditors, I'm doing a college project on Mental Health of youth, and need some data from my target audience. I would really appreciate if you guys could spare some time to fill out a Survey Form regarding the same.

Thanks in advance, to everyone who filled the form.

​

FORM LINK - [https://forms.gle/WmWv2J1Ggc7AQCsp7](https://forms.gle/WmWv2J1Ggc7AQCsp7)",9.828579234972679,13.96552073770492,7.138934426229511,61.987964480874346,62.93442622950819,8.656830601092896,26.560109289617486,9.2995712137729,2.866506010928961,339,10,43,7,6,97,48,61,0.0,0.903,0.09699999999999999,0.7089,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,10,6,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,9,4,6,10,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,3,3,28,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561514178489797,0.28726546365906497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18875509255457693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22590101639409554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340842395370537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5025880645735014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.476493735623088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17529589652980168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15145105738953074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176556543263224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13785326188958047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16793972133011115,0.0,0.28726546365906497,0.0
mentalhealth,Ringey21,2020/04/11,Losing energy/ Vitality Hello everyone .. i came to discuss my unspeakable mental issue .. in the past when i was like 14 i could live life to the fullest i didn't have trobule to laugh and smile .. i didn't really need to struggle to make friends everything came flawlessly and i didn't need to notice if i was likeable or not.. no i am basically too serious i don't even laugh at TV shows or whatever i don't care about anything ppl who are new in my life think i am pretty boring yet people who have been with me never thought so and they thinkni am the same .. i keep thinking abt this like daily and i keep wondering WHO AM III !! oh and btw i'm only 17 now  and i have started to experinece this issue since i got into college ( yep where im from its possible to be at college so young) everybody thought that i was cold untill i belived it now nobody wants to be friends with me and i am trying way too hard i keep making unfunny jokes because i think i have to make some to be likeable .. i can't be as comfortable with myself and my enviroment as much as other's ..i even started to experience this feeling with my very close friends and i am afraid they would think i am boring and leave .. i know they won't still nobody but them r really my friends and when i say friends i dont mean like close friends .. i mean people to talk to .. laugh with and enjoy ur time with i don't have that because i am boring right now and i want my old self back💔 .. i always thought abt comitting suicide and how it would literally free me from this caged mindset .💔,1.3288624976804613,3.6177795899053637,3.1591102245314566,89.01956717387272,82.75394321766561,6.379254035999257,24.15002783447764,7.618777277803332,1.2686259788457963,1218,47,254,21,34,406,160,317,0.075,0.741,0.184,0.9874,0,0,0,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,4,1,16,26,0,2,3,1,34,2,0,4,1,59,63,27,1,8,5,0,2,3,6,3,2,1,0,1,13,25,0,3,12,3,1,2,12,7,0,0,13,4,47,20,32,42,3,28,0,1,0,0,19,9,0,5,19,168,60,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897062513680482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810076830787131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07297799281167089,0.0,0.11570943620124452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170977439256984,0.09676449976055826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577589902978285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11123085817252644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12537098914155054,0.0,0.0,0.09068816304415638,0.08529672216311181,0.0928377254610242,0.0,0.0,0.047988072868503616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4399516955745532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590618065919412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501845916375575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251636317359676,0.19811749999826828,0.0,0.253074383343462,0.0,0.0,0.0521586682345264,0.0,0.0,0.10049331635821313,0.0,0.0,0.13407191787082748,0.13910100035536194,0.0,0.08380504245522052,0.0,0.0,0.10617719224393753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900544369516879,0.0,0.0,0.2067641347146536,0.0,0.0,0.09564441602670716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976791702023337,0.14074538573773088,0.07319849841426466,0.09166223430979006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805279351348124,0.09958943371258612,0.0,0.0,0.07218141422675876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059992739989126,0.13159379149381567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10699392209481913,0.0,0.0965550256664747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160032216756896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08105046822239198,0.0,0.07547423634924784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900919880952128,0.0,0.0,0.07850844710639134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435200378388304,0.0,0.07579323506646463,0.0,0.0,0.09921790333347964,0.0,0.1038133775628159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07628303632718737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432515205544369,0.0,0.2260378103979957,0.05534131404084211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443594812948487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830860942172621,0.11195777978043613,0.07533313899233253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10292311214053436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483909964358518,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fboch55,2020/04/11,"Changing My Life Hey everyone just wanted to give a little story about myself to create awareness about my [YouTube](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCey4WHEXpG82PPU5bmG4gTA) Channel.

Mental Health | Health & Wellness | Fun Random Vlogs | Fitness

Over  the last 8 months my life has changed completely. I just graduated  college last May, and moved out on my own, got a new job and living in a  state where I know no one. Also, during this time I lost my  grandfather, a 94 year WW2 Vet, who was a father figure to me. I almost  lost my brother due to an illness, and my girlfriend broke up with me.  Having no where to turn because I could not be at home with my family  and friends due to work, I decided to change my life. I was so lost for a  bit and I never really experienced mental health before, but I  struggled with waking up in the morning, trying to do my own work,  reading, eating ... etc. After about a week of this, even though I  continued to battle my mental health everyday, I chose to better myself  in every way possible. From my own health, my work, my hobbies and my  personal career aspirations. I chose to start hitting the gym, which I  do everyday now and I love it. It makes me feel so much better about  myself and I love to feel strong! I re-created my first ever game that  is available on the [App Store](https://apps.apple.com/us/app/mission-mars/id1020774210)  ! I also started to read again because I have always wanted to read  more. I also became kinda of an amateur chef! I like to put 100% into  everything I do so I thought that since I was working out, might as well  learn how to cook my own healthy meals! Lastly, this is where YouTube  comes in! I decided to challenge myself, to record almost every-day and  post 2 times a week for a year straight. I did this to not only record  my progress of mental health for myself, but to show others how I  overcame my mental health battles, to give them hope that they can do it  themselves! Also, I have always had a dream of creating my own vlogging  channel! I hope you can learn something from this, I really hope you  can change your life like I did! I believe in you and if you need  anything, I am always here to help!

\#mentalhealth #wellness #fitness #vlogs #YouTube",5.315099443118537,6.75088969451074,5.5433961813842485,80.19534884645985,68.52267303102624,7.877836117740652,28.763802704852825,8.238735603445708,2.0372195067621317,1758,62,314,24,30,557,214,419,0.051,0.774,0.175,0.9953,1,0,1,0,0,0,87.0,0,5,2,13,27,23,2,1,16,0,24,18,1,3,2,51,48,24,0,8,7,2,2,2,2,2,12,0,1,1,14,17,3,0,9,10,0,3,5,7,3,2,11,3,67,16,54,32,9,51,0,4,0,2,20,21,0,10,26,226,81,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12886061950977365,0.0,0.0,0.20582058158085326,0.16061581454622312,0.06971571054842242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052948880239640214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844590024857045,0.0,0.05475123003859858,0.07249262810871074,0.0,0.1138124676845929,0.07024598897703227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722658282409386,0.055425874243903,0.06746250512105087,0.0,0.0,0.05137272128953781,0.0,0.0,0.041495969731177834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06583904378820175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07175955307626389,0.042498003754670895,0.05820200812860502,0.05421182796534284,0.06148257934223233,0.057827419940928985,0.0,0.060656938355242836,0.0,0.06506759864971629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054730199025599,0.0,0.0,0.04971131130741152,0.0,0.0,0.12344750883310793,0.0,0.0,0.05146104649481531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4787558669475923,0.0,0.0,0.04312781657139922,0.0,0.0645413649439375,0.19172161793093676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385058798818054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03536127925044656,0.1573446170046967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18178970774928624,0.06286956683103385,0.0644886791757449,0.05681612681385385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107142486967649,0.0,0.11614430072045465,0.0,0.04294951184730307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32421350260123155,0.06825784986370204,0.0,0.0,0.0513580401386597,0.06838652132707465,0.0472995741643835,0.047709585546791625,0.049625357217744255,0.062142956748323916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04360054263082196,0.04893581894552659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05618190388843768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253716564011074,0.06162289363065562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646825765885733,0.0,0.0,0.19308150484354653,0.0,0.08243966141500003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05322526850504094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04953445378579099,0.0,0.0,0.0910847397847116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726536748682849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321675870744049,0.05108122583896845,0.07503794579591977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04368473415250522,0.06998680474999698,0.0,0.0,0.07739681426558757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590244247178388,0.051072549489621054,0.10322429050011282,0.0,0.1735564941587352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18737014179958053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286968008329001
mentalhealth,AlauraYam,2020/04/11,"My family are so supportive and it p***es me off. This quarantine is starting to get to me, I just dont want to talk to anyone except my SO and I wanna just lounge and do nothing all day, but that means that I've been getting obsessive thoughts of everything that has gone wrong or I've done wrong in my life and i spiral. 

My mum asked how I was doing and I answered ""bit depressed"". Instantly she starts asking to 1 million questions and says I need a hobby and she will get me anything I need. I know i should be grateful but omg it annoys the hell outta me, I've been spoiled my whole life and usually got whatever I wanted, because of this I really struggle with money, savings, ect. I moved in with my SO last year and I've tried my best to budget my money and not just spend it all at once, and I was doing great! Then she randomly sends me £300 a few days ago even though I told her multiple times I'm fine on money. It's like she still thinks I'm a child. 

And I know maybe a hobby might be a good idea but I have to decide right there and then what I want to do, then I have to pick out the stuff and she will buy it. I sound really ungrateful but it just grinds my gears that she thinks me being down can be solved by throwing money at it and hounding me for the next few days over it. 

It makes me want to not tell her anything. 

Guess this kinda turned into a big rant but it feels good to just get it off my chest and out into the world somewhere. Thanks for reading if you male it this far 💖 hope your all doing ok out there!",2.4317846153846148,3.5972867630769234,3.676307692307692,91.85969230769231,75.21538461538462,6.8000000000000025,21.923076923076927,7.24861992348623,0.4931846153846156,1198,29,272,13,25,391,172,325,0.10300000000000001,0.769,0.128,0.8959,0,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,2,0,1,14,18,2,2,10,1,25,3,1,3,3,69,57,31,0,10,15,1,1,1,0,4,2,2,0,2,22,23,0,0,11,1,7,4,3,7,0,1,9,3,47,11,34,40,8,37,1,1,0,0,21,18,1,8,16,188,69,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939055183207723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07839922743950993,0.0,0.18453586613076747,0.0,0.20964032422200032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834933090775831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11766649952434655,0.0,0.12240961810165255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169307834449601,0.0,0.09657164518241554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11474107757159716,0.13140768777345704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07405639076976721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076920396248457,0.0,0.10569988076768974,0.0,0.05669291597636693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234319213272836,0.0,0.0,0.1880874305629724,0.08967525605769984,0.1236163484015785,0.12351647015260055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113637488987935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657357266918393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12324008108273138,0.09139546498611308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583920236903275,0.054777787159630005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07484318207264118,0.0,0.11264293829605372,0.12213515792168535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11894511638219805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11916933736508112,0.0,0.16627603174553862,0.0,0.0,0.1192444153761527,0.0,0.0,0.10758534279641054,0.0,0.0,0.11940766902531165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12560377117448132,0.0,0.11215365515089486,0.0,0.1436581307658605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09575269666211432,0.0,0.08916495878993172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587229160597405,0.0,0.08954182258942825,0.0,0.0,0.11721563131842548,0.1283543681059818,0.0,0.1272362068597166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09012047182577836,0.0980007175883572,0.10322808235903803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368818324612798,0.1101605857315533,0.08901338621849045,0.06538000547628639,0.0,0.0,0.10713863050099476,0.0,0.07612436955266995,0.12195796751332168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234879885961781,0.0,0.2645329400655625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12518167479902398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24517848268410014,0.0,0.07220373745836484
mentalhealth,throwawayarinodoodly,2020/04/11,"Was weaned off antipsychotics by my psychiatrist and have since been experiencing a level of libido that is causing suffering So at the title explains, I was weaned of off Risperidone, which for 10 years has almost completely suppressed my sex drive.

I've recently been weaned off having been completely off for 3 days.  Each days this gets worse and worse.  Like my libido has come back in a tsunami so strong I am having tremors and severe restlessness and mental anguish.

This is an absolutely new feeling for me and I feel awful!  And I am still trying to act like a normal human being but it is extremely challenging.  Obviously I would never harm anyone.  I would rather continue suffering that have something like that weigh on my conscience.

I don't even know what to do for something like this.  How doe pills even do this to people.  Like this is pure agony",4.997142857142858,7.552028318471336,5.09312556869882,78.52128980891723,71.54777070063695,8.052593266606005,27.13785259326661,8.841846274778883,2.37474194722475,694,25,116,14,14,217,98,157,0.127,0.735,0.138,0.4246,0,0,2,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,8,12,0,2,5,1,23,3,0,2,3,24,29,10,0,4,2,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,0,1,11,8,1,1,4,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,5,3,12,7,17,21,1,20,0,2,0,1,2,8,0,1,14,85,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463828463618568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149630784130602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642530251374953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16889991769011886,0.0,0.1416293184790256,0.34477286117803546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21206867705111512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388103438372826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171896570185436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166266744143234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859002663959797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035841020294184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4016253250317635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16569206364899633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680730106481733,0.15879342874785315,0.0,0.0,0.16109219435351144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398494434801935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623403834122618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18574261575593634,0.0,0.13600612722967242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531500324213324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13130235982923752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11162727174551187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33510670098404904,0.23359198172405266,0.0,0.0,0.10587813429088423
mentalhealth,lowraito,2020/04/11,"how do i build self esteem? i’ve had piss poor confidence and self esteem my whole life because i was emotionally abused by my parents the first 14 years of my life. i have complex ptsd so my brain is literally wired to flip out at things i didn’t even know would trigger me. i’m 18 now and tired of feeling so awful about myself all the time, but i don’t even know where to start.

i have a really good support system with my friends and teachers and my therapist, and that’s helped a lot of my anxiety, but now i feel stuck. i’m obsessed with my body image and i constantly compare my looks to my friends, and i hate that i do it. it’s like my brain just does this without me even consciously thinking it.

anyone have any advice for building up my self esteem?",4.5155769230769245,4.955078378205133,5.244,85.251,69.7051282051282,8.291282051282051,29.06153846153846,8.238735603445708,1.8094738461538449,601,21,127,8,10,195,96,156,0.133,0.726,0.141,0.6688,1,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,11,8,2,1,4,1,11,7,4,2,1,26,23,12,0,1,4,1,2,1,2,1,3,0,0,3,7,10,0,0,7,0,1,0,3,3,0,1,4,3,25,5,15,18,3,12,0,0,1,0,7,4,1,1,8,85,32,0,0.0,0.1670744977254703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779392215920208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589204056074337,0.0,0.10787271977607542,0.0,0.0,0.0985978871991906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595875034843878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566309833008712,0.0,0.3148289196935893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238235906014716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339932258336328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15861794069717652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2794085057456912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14259838819824874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199435406988669,0.0,0.0,0.2178888729494913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11827299750206227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13921876977679612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09451642994693593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15499147134312893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19919990789603192,0.06889065435694082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841338599330956,0.0,0.0,0.1198821659092454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15657557908736744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16483384043758426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903349984119909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4413144138667081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09980802544042723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16001715299154784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16372417004174372,0.09368117406925874,0.0903538959901702,0.0,0.0,0.08222441235160269,0.16207093630343386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743329436202771,0.0,0.1359291823159316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10016988142015107,0.0,0.0,0.09080620044084876
mentalhealth,Stephen_Howe11,2020/04/11,What’s wrong with me? I’m not sure how to say exactly how I feel just that my mind constantly tells me I want to disappear I want to sleep or that it usually spikes after I do something what I feel is enjoyable like playing music drawing and talking to my friends I always pick my work apart and myself and then I want to hide despite wearing sic parvis magna around my neck everyday I still feel like nothing and not enough I recently moved to New York to go to music college and failed to get in which has brought up a whole slew of problems with family who I used to solve their problems and chaos all the time I’m constantly worried if I’m talented or good I love making music even though I’m new I really want a teacher but I don’t think I deserve one I want to belong somewhere I feel lonely even with people around and I always look like a fool I don’t know what to do or what’s wrong with me I feel cold it makes me want sleep I’m sorry for the long post.,3.1557799671592766,4.257897320197042,4.278147783251232,88.49472577996717,73.33497536945812,7.580821018062397,25.848604269293922,8.021203637495839,1.3595959934318556,768,25,166,11,15,251,112,203,0.14400000000000002,0.7170000000000001,0.139,-0.7254,0,2,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,2,9,17,0,0,5,0,6,5,4,6,3,46,32,16,0,9,8,0,5,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,10,13,0,0,7,1,0,4,4,7,0,1,1,8,29,10,23,31,3,22,0,2,1,1,7,5,0,4,15,99,39,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19019333466529875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034808782059856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2470091825242039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11808992585269512,0.0,0.15097212700172394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10774043710108352,0.0,0.28893691759470264,0.08164728066871738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829852864912392,0.0,0.059710697580357235,0.0,0.06495243307424926,0.09585924711974136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280962716225336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750584832672893,0.0,0.0,0.10114117286221504,0.09597303078430948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10314926919930738,0.0,0.15257608791943358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11539817384430015,0.0,0.0,0.1214699241239357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22075988351428036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10966229833343763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0774444218298261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923282227442514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945619207347533,0.0,0.0,0.2187161227409824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732157391731404,0.0,0.11284548867781485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09088630530474452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287408244850873,0.0,0.0,0.08798438970309906,0.0,0.12793591907124974,0.0,0.0,0.09127044453168057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771496955755988,0.0,0.0,0.0918602647017675,0.09989264010993101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323105549770234,0.11228725682401117,0.0,0.06664217893649277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0987080291703181,0.12587194773972538,0.0,0.4044596982981257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759833087735395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320293409366386,0.11606488463261427,0.0,0.0,0.24991169999730126,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ElvesAndGoblins,2020/04/11,"Saw someone lashing out violently while having a panic attack.(Anxiety attack?), trying to put it into words to describe it properly to a doctor, and to look into it more to see what I could have done better. Hello everyone. 

​

I saw someone acting quite erratic recently outside of the house. I was driving around town and saw this person being yelled at. At first, I thought it was a couple's spat, but it didn't appear as though they really knew each other, or cared for each other, but from my distance, who can really tell. 

Anyway, the person was shaking, while holding themself by the arms over their chest. They looked like they were having trouble breathing. 

I pulled over a bit far away to see if I needed to intervein, but the person suddenly lashed out. Started flailing their arms all over the place hitting the other person and they tried to grab rocks and throw them at my car, others' cars too and the person who was shouting at them. 

It didn't look like the kind of reaction you get from an angry teenager who's just flailing, it looked like a cornered animal trying to snarl angrily at others to make them think they aren't afraid. 

After my original ""wtf was that?"" I left and wondered if there was a name for something like that. If so, I'd like to learn the name so I can study it a bit to know how to best react if I ever see something like that again. Honestly, it left me wanting to learn more. 

​

Does anyone know the name of such a thing? Anybody faced/did something similar?",5.438379790940768,6.7221074982578415,5.6713083623693405,79.9610391986063,68.09407665505226,7.969965156794426,28.635714285714286,8.238735603445708,2.0404524041811847,1200,41,212,16,20,381,158,287,0.085,0.79,0.126,0.9288,0,0,3,0,0,0,45.0,0,1,10,4,12,17,2,3,19,0,18,6,5,4,2,45,42,21,0,7,9,0,1,6,0,0,1,2,0,5,23,13,0,1,8,1,0,9,3,6,0,1,15,13,24,11,38,24,8,39,0,0,10,0,24,20,0,7,16,156,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19916463874078508,0.22335664886342027,0.0,0.0,0.07030939651546984,0.0,0.0,0.064264236231976,0.0,0.0,0.08181763830220039,0.0,0.20911732005235584,0.08635062591129929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645181424595893,0.08128518963761802,0.20067954421668568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937063687696368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07338108868341273,0.10169449449456808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940717700438763,0.08042934227730762,0.0940538313373295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313608103348924,0.0,0.08782206770339261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07817692906947894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04801815581369977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060495345476048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09570807703784462,0.10102050673980507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997167015971275,0.0,0.0,0.2694097456769558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3087184128044753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134932817775569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814864465377203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783427837979824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4012527629600198,0.09602433672759457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923929620579466,0.0,0.09775551021893322,0.0,0.0,0.11775728350517872,0.0,0.09074809837738272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197164176392269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15574676249348945,0.2122658906262647,0.0,0.0,0.0650529814274087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033167509030137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06105961569656361,0.058890958836279726,0.0902991794194348,0.07296471491593239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18719857176083424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05420974130334722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099670345271508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22335664886342027,0.0
mentalhealth,puppetmaster99,2020/04/11,I just want out. I’ve been making so many plans. But i always stop short at when i think about the people that care about me. I just want out. Why isn’t there an option for people like me to just seize to exist? Completely erase myself from existence so that no one would miss me and their lives wouldn’t be affected. I plead from the universe everyday for a way out...,2.0763428571428584,4.094742386666667,2.905904761904761,93.312,78.46666666666667,6.419047619047619,17.38095238095238,7.447530270364453,0.06629523809523796,289,5,63,4,7,91,53,75,0.106,0.782,0.11199999999999999,0.1082,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,1,9,3,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,2,0,17,11,5,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,0,10,2,12,7,0,9,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,1,4,44,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386669176599147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29244399239271873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3007375369669544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401314600237449,0.0,0.25327760964910906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19146235947974755,0.2908022819327849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19436455521015847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3977059133646517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398041101611717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1837901451528379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383614877298328,0.2276736197769625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.258820958183987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20375698075216386,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idekka_,2020/04/11,"Fighting loneliness using the internet So as the title may suggest, I want to do something about my loneliness. I've never really had any amazing expierences making friends in real life and for the past few years I've been suffering from severe loneliness. So I figured I could give making online friends a go. The thing is, making friends online is way harder than I originally thought it would be. I've been trying to socialise online for a while without any succes.
I was wondering if anyone has any tips or advise?
I don't know which socialmedia platforms are the best for making friends or how to interact with others online in general.",7.860476190476187,8.561687965811965,8.073870573870575,66.9469230769231,62.50427350427351,10.788278388278387,37.227106227106226,10.608840637214634,4.3847567765567765,520,24,78,12,7,170,79,117,0.127,0.705,0.168,0.7479,0,0,1,0,2,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,4,8,1,0,7,0,14,1,0,7,1,24,25,9,0,4,4,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,5,0,7,6,14,16,2,10,0,1,0,0,9,3,0,5,5,57,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3377935270132985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11577508719984687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376254445163855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13219953179673194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5116966292521286,0.0,0.0,0.1588362701017101,0.09410106140581648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099663096092504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169517286930966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4420949651556012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12770296812692722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15806170743518336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884625481309649,0.10607268183361368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870545555383128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12746904259521932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100018104337382,0.0,0.0,0.13144941459213694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241571901704983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430051173538827,0.0,0.0,0.09766143495148773,0.13142708738632344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.159610042189221,0.17956088162930733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11762094590107518,0.0,0.0,0.10662597417617224
mentalhealth,ProbablyHooman,2020/04/11,"I think I had multiple cannabis-induced personality switches while being high. As the title already explains what this is about I want to add that I'm not really sure about this but I felt the urge to write about it and hear different opinions. Also sorry for my english.

So yesterday I smoked the rests of a joint which was left from my last smoking session. It was not much. Probably like 0.2g and I didn't expect to get really high. Quickly after smoking the joint, I went home and was already pretty high. I got under the shower and I realized that I'm thinking very fast. Didn't think much of it because this commonly happens to me while I am high and to my friends too  but the difference this time was that it wasn't really pleasant and rather very stressful. Then a bit later I realized that my opinion on a specific thought changed rapidly. Imagine thinking about something you like and in the next second you'r completelly terrified of it and you also forgot that you ever liked it. It was just like that the whole time. Then out of the nothing I was kinda able to see my body from outside of the shower and then I realized that what I'm experiencing right now seems just like a dissociative episode of a person with the dissociative identiy disorder. I got shook and was absolutely scared. I tried to ground myself and get back the control over the situacion but I couldn't I was stuck in a loop. I gained my ""consciousness"" back for a few seconds or minutes and then immediately felt back into the loop where I completely forgot that I was trying to chill out. It was a nightmare.

As soon as I had gotten out of the shower I went directly into my room and sat on my bed and tried grounding myself again. This time it worked but for like only 3 minutes but in those 3 minutes I got the idea to record myself having these switches to analyze it later on and to see what it looked like. So I started recording myself and everytimed I gained back the control over my mind I watched the video and it was absolutely terrifying. My whole facial expression was changing every time a switch occured. I also started getting a cramp in my leg and realized later on that it was a small seizure.

It was so scary. You don't realize that you'r switching in that moment. It just seems normal and it's ducking scary. I am going to and have to quit weed for a time and pray that this doesn't happen when I'm sober.",4.84244363269933,6.26957245396146,5.483252928580427,80.21444734853256,69.64239828693789,8.235017004660538,30.4376495780325,8.671277953709913,2.4279865726161987,1924,78,355,32,34,622,208,467,0.131,0.816,0.053,-0.9896,4,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,4,0,6,26,13,0,3,30,0,28,4,3,2,2,73,65,43,0,5,12,0,2,7,1,0,1,1,6,2,40,28,0,4,18,1,0,4,8,3,0,2,32,8,48,10,52,31,7,65,1,0,4,0,11,28,0,6,40,263,88,2,0.08015172909692096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689885231491168,0.1922919264023567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24652692881822766,0.0,0.04885975011603013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750492905800389,0.08903050211278055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16957980328906558,0.0,0.08403756300766059,0.0,0.17979395924411448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16748299496070707,0.0918608255652264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07250182774125581,0.06753128867988571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539164588052977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06192502707532055,0.0,0.12562791093755962,0.0,0.045552074743102064,0.0,0.1923139792758185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14175581867051376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09033682394246516,0.0,0.0,0.3387388097047556,0.0803987194567446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048154604842698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533435692276808,0.0,0.0,0.08708508818459883,0.0,0.0,0.2741066035157579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730726571260827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809303976983283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178414865247736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524227319611677,0.0,0.07853167669154107,0.07690774577258351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060959001753448386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13997079650223834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154312355832026,0.0864171203791946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525122996592382,0.0,0.0,0.15404175018542549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684491387071631,0.0,0.0,0.08024586340821135,0.0,0.12774110162179458,0.14593424776283806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06170471691799841,0.0,0.08972329860529067,0.1134636127869726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181353487609817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554205611709708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054319664813356,0.0,0.06363151986793553,0.2336855889977288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16325328827739538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226714134618495,0.047275566481057685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860291175731516,0.0,0.17897308630689734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835141338504474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Tomskaa,2020/04/11,"My girlfriend lowers my self worth 
Hi. I’m 17m and my girlfriend is 17f. She doesn’t do anything purposely to lower my self worth, however I get really down whenever I see photos of her or when I see other people post about her. Especially when she does “yolos” and gets heaps of messages from people saying how amazing she is. Whenever that happens I just get really down about myself, because in my mind I know I’ll never be good enough for her. Any tips on how to stop this/improve my self worth would be great. Thank you",2.091984265734265,4.5326391250000055,3.6415034965035,85.79440559440562,80.82692307692308,6.4741258741258765,21.954545454545453,7.686295010490155,1.1455115384615384,415,13,79,7,11,137,69,104,0.077,0.775,0.149,0.8314,3,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,7,4,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,2,1,11,16,7,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,3,2,2,0,1,1,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,19,4,12,13,1,9,0,0,2,0,15,4,0,1,4,50,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12432571850398395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15044752062606412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144703289533783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15998939383674127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18890474081537173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865519755950883,0.0,0.0,0.15334302313390888,0.0,0.20156269364662466,0.0,0.0,0.1616695270540805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047458539855464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18459882977500586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410041519254442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534925083193131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17509362839358156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342418310832108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453879644964454,0.0,0.0,0.2913720745751441,0.0,0.5721719057108541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528479797440176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16831859708936064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12987201447788874,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theyarealwayswatchin,2020/04/11,"Med lies Med lies

Do you ever think they’re giving you meds to stop you from knowing the truth? Like they know something that you don’t and that’s how they stop you from knowing? Because that’s what it feels like. Like I’ve finally found the truth and meaning that everyone else is always searching for and that they didnt want you to know. Why would I keep taking the pills when it’s just going to corner me back in to an oblivion of ignorance now that I can finally see. Accepting that reality is an intangible, unfixed concept and that nothing is really real is freeing. Why would I not want to live in enlightened bliss where nothing really matters except for exploration, pleasure and intuition. I don’t know why that’s so hard for people to understand.",4.949651307596515,6.617064027397263,5.508281444582816,79.2111270236613,69.68493150684931,8.870734744707347,30.396014943960147,9.339509955726095,2.8243369863013696,612,25,110,13,11,197,84,146,0.111,0.685,0.204,0.9533,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,6,3,0,8,9,0,0,5,0,11,1,0,1,3,35,28,8,0,4,3,0,2,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,12,5,0,4,13,0,1,2,4,1,0,0,2,3,14,9,15,24,0,14,0,0,1,0,10,4,0,0,11,71,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708268821780448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09895679105332604,0.0,0.0784499138707029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1075062900314976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640997197617654,0.0,0.12297145009906822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06507092778168135,0.0919381356351498,0.0,0.28195326293190603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411049721668592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12345382492677345,0.07313906296577127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11528343785577574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11438804087188355,0.0,0.0,0.3536308848219203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18861835050734416,0.0,0.11363806753164245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401841465349783,0.4288459441171956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24696835401414075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921935796709067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648053877943126,0.16488775874949613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10255147024064157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907397635349163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2151858247763317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676094179973152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08246112617480647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13397370492647992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15181265191984175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34837560531462225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828392929863504,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheFireFishie,2020/04/11,"I don’t know anymore  I have severe anxiety, low self esteem ,depression ,mood swings ,obsessive thoughts and behaviors, attachment issues ,abandonment issues and self worth issues I’m pretty sure I’m missing some stuff i just can’t seem to get better I do alright for a little while and then I’m right back here my stuffed animals are my only friends after leaving guys because they mistreated me i usually deep dive into social media searches into ex’s and potential new girlfriends I don’t know why I have an addiction and self harm problems I’m gonna come clean to my mom today it’s gonna hurt her so badly but when this is over I need to go see someone because I really need help I’m afraid of myself I can’t focus I can’t like pay attention to things for a while I’m just looking for some feedback maybe if someone’s been through the same or advice or just a positive word",3.12409090909091,5.2961132272727305,4.522727272727273,82.22909090909094,75.81818181818181,7.581818181818183,28.04545454545455,8.472884824447931,2.298859090909091,712,30,130,14,16,236,115,176,0.13,0.7170000000000001,0.153,0.7827,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,7,16,0,2,5,1,11,1,0,0,1,29,31,14,0,4,7,2,0,1,2,2,1,0,1,4,4,8,0,1,5,0,2,2,5,10,0,0,2,2,18,5,13,27,3,18,0,5,2,0,12,7,0,6,10,73,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14261927644414407,0.0,0.12784131765185755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008126932427344,0.0,0.12974389758829946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059685465096524,0.10923395879065233,0.15950021214368368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11570466195662993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11269471919041127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11267994645366318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107557787403083,0.0,0.06835100601935097,0.0,0.07435123560656519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295379685578968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768968002961262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14005157134599874,0.0,0.0,0.40964398820690345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14379671912098552,0.0,0.0,0.138525480759234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06391480762638158,0.1311216771915969,0.0,0.0,0.10986060238210413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13143195636366542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322142801550265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19401113358092065,0.0,0.12635223451048416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949880718436427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309672558214308,0.0,0.12518248511398947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381026569317483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1117243960408941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042511103708012,0.11909876443251033,0.4094390760014336,0.1477957540790372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336028178797735,0.2216963088292894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14976407720875531,0.0,0.0,0.12330163322400987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08691475316560086,0.0,0.0,0.1038609580877792,0.0,0.0,0.12400742555162887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14408597799493214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11804980658306274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QT-Anonymous,2020/04/11,"ADVICE Lately I’ve been feeling different, empty sort of. Food doesn’t interest me anymore and I keep thinking about the fact that I don’t need it. I don’t like myself when I stand on a scale or look at myself in a mirror. I’m definitely not fat but don’t have a flat stomach. I feel like a disease, not pretty or skinny enough for anyone to be proud of or be around. Every time I go to eat I look down at the thighs and feel sick to my stomach and push it away. I don’t wanna do this but it’s like my mind and body’s forcing me to stop.",0.5630404889228444,2.1672421260504184,2.908082505729567,93.481436210848,81.52100840336134,5.335676088617267,19.22154316271964,6.1124844417494595,-0.18141008403361392,419,10,98,3,11,144,74,119,0.10400000000000001,0.746,0.15,0.528,1,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,6,0,10,9,6,0,1,23,20,10,0,2,7,0,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,5,4,2,4,0,0,2,7,0,0,0,1,5,14,5,16,17,1,14,0,0,2,0,0,7,0,4,7,64,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956951570110219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19860756190661244,0.1400288830889634,0.0,0.0,0.17827695745232133,0.0,0.0,0.188154133766484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22244758251703306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092327149549654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2049195380898387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20692571088155864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16873062101874847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30377770148381705,0.1430682716745469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421593975598154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381435198918916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800338450109948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22590593074752535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29351586506255617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363417747467017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20220902828706885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484928344973646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037399573851461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742923829663486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832075308753435,0.0,0.0,0.11677524692776385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wingsandflowers,2020/04/11,"Seeking Negativity to Get Angry Over on Purpose I have developed a very stupid habit of purposefully seeking out things online that I know will offend me. This occupies my mind heavily for an entire day. I'll keep thinking of opinions/views opposite to mine and find them (on facebook, youtube comments, tumblr posts etc) and leave my own pointless views and start pointless arguments. I don't know why I do this. 

This stuff that my mind obsessed over doesn't matter at all. But I get these pangs of anger(?) and annoyance and my mind is absolutely consumed by finding and replying to other people (on very trivial, pointless matters). I can't focus on anything else until I find whatever topic/opinion I decide is offending me and leave my own negative input. 

This is a very very serious problem as I just...stay online all day and cannot focus on work or anything else until I've let out my own toxicity. 

I know the solution is to...stop finding negativity like this. But I often wonder why I do this? 

This developed a few years ago I guess. I'm trying to work on it by convincing myself how none of the things I worry/obsess/get annoyed over actually matter. No one else around me is like this, they're all chill. 

Is this some form of narcissism? I've looked into it but idk I experienced severe (VERY severe) lack of self confidence and esteem so idk how that ties in...

I'm sick and annoyed of myself being like this, I want to not care about pointless things but my mind suddenly absolutely consumes me...",4.862325358851674,6.651901926315794,5.982272727272732,75.24613636363638,70.08771929824562,8.690590111642742,30.49840510366826,9.218907990703514,2.888754385964912,1199,50,207,25,22,399,152,285,0.187,0.757,0.057,-0.9783,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,1,2,6,15,7,1,6,0,16,1,0,2,3,49,31,21,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,21,14,0,1,10,0,0,0,10,10,0,1,0,3,31,5,34,28,12,24,0,0,2,0,3,15,0,5,11,145,52,2,0.0,0.0,0.09638857976637252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755665000756659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16256416678270375,0.08792925769016607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10070605333683326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12740132961563566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475374774155542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015843868411627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3611083537158805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15481505763174055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881002417204574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877943268114434,0.0,0.0,0.16284981490739125,0.0,0.0,0.2091735151260618,0.0,0.10100248270541666,0.0,0.14476706638960796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294477033460683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3989318644342894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693140489444173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068477031441101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459760350424724,0.0,0.0,0.09451279396394957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304218676086144,0.22317163046090666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06991231336104667,0.10527929082234412,0.0,0.08257897627061693,0.0,0.0,0.11307189947174415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968619527936653,0.06328999959654104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706064770855473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4074919529719949,0.05825910416496419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17825524132884082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10711552735213277,0.1438164076546524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360682432432117
mentalhealth,dxzys,2020/04/11,"Progress, I guess. I'm a 14 y/o HF Autistic boy who couldn't recover from their parents arguing & separation in mid 2019. I'm making progress. I posted a photo on my private instagram account. I posted one before adding a reddit link to explain, but not much went and did that, and I don't blame them. However, I explained to ""sum things up"" on a new post I made.",2.8128828828828847,4.366142000000004,4.6875675675675685,83.42207207207208,74.94594594594594,7.636036036036036,29.90090090090089,8.344100000000001,2.254295495495496,284,13,57,5,6,97,57,74,0.032,0.868,0.1,0.5194,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,4,0,3,0,0,2,0,11,11,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,3,0,1,1,3,1,0,1,3,0,9,0,7,7,1,10,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,1,32,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614554456631592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20533402209829252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2658262678418027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22833000443927484,0.16107393402025452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17738801118919928,0.0,0.0,0.2330552801319345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16351550052379238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679422641330071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6933146484707714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16031328788986554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22369350345909395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chickchickboom-,2020/04/11,"Self esteem keeps going up and down all the time? Not sure what it might be For the last few years I’ve found that my self-esteem goes up and down so much which has a massive impact on my anxiety levels. Sometimes I’ll feel really good about myself, maybe for several days at a time, and will feel really confident which  means I’m able to easily socially interact with people and don’t get nervous or anything. But then all of a sudden (it literally comes out of nowhere) I’ll feel like a piece of shit, which makes me get all nervous in social situations and have no confidence and also causes me to overthink and overanalyse everything, and I just feel like my brain can’t process my thoughts properly. But when I’m in a state when my self-esteem is high I feel like I’ve got a really clear mind and can express myself so much more easily, like I can put whatever I’m thinking into words way easier and also have way more motivation.

Has anyone got any idea what this might be? Like a lack of serotonin in the brain or something? Thinking of finally going to my gp to try and get some help cause every time I start feeling good about myself I know it’s only a matter of time before I start to feel like shit again.. it’s like a never ending cycle",4.241404444444441,5.447199416000004,5.4026666666666685,81.0657777777778,70.84,8.755555555555556,25.488888888888887,9.150863307647796,1.9753022222222216,994,29,193,20,18,330,137,250,0.07400000000000001,0.738,0.188,0.9801,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,10,14,2,2,12,0,14,4,4,4,6,53,42,22,0,1,6,0,7,7,0,3,0,0,0,1,11,15,0,1,15,0,0,4,5,4,0,0,4,7,17,10,27,33,11,37,0,0,0,0,6,13,2,5,24,119,28,1,0.09104838415956612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1456227198350597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191602341063397,0.0,0.06965176467168163,0.0,0.0,0.06366314718474493,0.0,0.07492506233822188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747546888942858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032802164611875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18706354192714092,0.0,0.07843012097857155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058718675538030486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064184377320395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671219053904345,0.0,0.08182841684891655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3222575911024653,0.2601799353436856,0.0,0.09973905443694632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09982985374191658,0.0,0.0,0.1427070685196994,0.0,0.10348978985743552,0.1527341297434327,0.1456394204811751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06102781268458875,0.09619761676775086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10278254326874058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092798726157525,0.0,0.0,0.05003781081314485,0.07421658515600149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.311371490281865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060775503428800136,0.0,0.09147033962288538,0.0991783820982117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931758946729188,0.0919329130244169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13386207703726366,0.0,0.07022212681869705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924639895067275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312148551554911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152877381281137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17498377895921546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28494996477953244,0.10285875820811648,0.1869197158787141,0.0,0.10234219857310703,0.0,0.1856247233145847,0.0,0.07009349434762248,0.09004918003496558,0.0,0.12888902986320472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858120245570245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1166802563936595,0.0,0.07228224681949398,0.21236417998061166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06181587627144398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445399387848426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058632174260227564
mentalhealth,fati2020,2020/04/11,"gained weight on abilify Hey guys!

I've noticed that for the past few months that I have gained weight (7 kg / 15 lb), and i know it's because of Abilify, and it's waay to much

have you guys experienced this? and what should I do?",1.938125,3.4155398958333367,3.1025000000000027,94.1925,77.125,7.300000000000002,22.416666666666664,8.07648339933343,0.7624416666666662,177,5,43,3,4,57,35,48,0.0,0.872,0.128,0.7052,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,0,5,5,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,4,4,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,24,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16343599244200172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5309376374022351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14734500464658293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21400104360688926,0.0,0.19709004093635746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3052424438970095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559391789624029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6529660078324359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway110420202,2020/04/11,"struggling with sleeping: overthinking i don't know how to do this as it is my first time actually asking for help. it has been a while since i struggle sleeping at night, mostly because my sleeping pattern is a disaster now that we are in self quarantine. as i try to sleep (and failing to do so), i can only think. of course that doesn't seem as a big problem but the thing is i only think about emotionally draining situations, not made up but mostly what happened in real life. it is torturing. 
i have tried thinking of other things but somehow i go back to that since i am wholeheartedly attached. yeah i know, not my greatest asset.
do you have any advice since i am giving myself up and don't know what to do. even any topic to think myself to sleep other than social life would help. thank you.",4.772639860139858,5.9715396089743615,5.522960372960373,80.72506993006994,69.57692307692308,7.724009324009327,28.925407925407924,8.00094639256281,1.9272897435897445,633,23,118,8,11,206,94,156,0.139,0.773,0.08900000000000001,-0.8056,0,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,1,2,0,2,7,6,1,2,4,1,20,7,5,2,0,25,34,11,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,13,4,0,0,8,0,0,1,5,5,0,1,2,0,18,1,21,31,3,13,0,1,0,0,9,6,0,4,6,94,31,1,0.0,0.0,0.11305011224349422,0.0,0.0,0.11320449921807982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15756007609881084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10830145182021224,0.0,0.0,0.08907931146868159,0.0,0.07061935050636127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13031245690851978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651595337581593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853953096400654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113114729767214,0.06583860795308673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244325668097153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1552998122466037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1909997003663258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1636525433364477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096173792409942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10871470737803876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17621396348207266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110850081949214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318594246957918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546289910583133,0.12085384811525665,0.0,0.0,0.28748989153868565,0.1302170561597218,0.5796540927467616,0.11809158566796595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422171992896776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10665649587778137,0.0,0.0,0.15392740449639594,0.29692071718960394,0.0,0.0,0.06755140776825957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730522783817227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229449517955649,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,aliairdina,2020/04/11,"Mental health survey. Hello everyone, I'm doing a survey about mental health issues for my assignment. I would be grateful if you could spare some time to answer my questions.The questions are:

1. What is your understanding of mental health?

2. Do you experience any mental health challenges/issues?

Thank you so much for your time and support! ❤️",3.2094444444444434,6.363597758064515,3.845053763440864,79.76535842293909,87.54838709677419,5.336200716845879,21.405017921146953,6.937597516519254,1.192789964157706,279,9,42,4,9,88,46,62,0.0,0.857,0.14300000000000002,0.8339,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,5,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,7,4,0,0,0,8,11,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,8,2,5,8,2,2,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,3,2,27,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761314092666493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460620612074802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13716005272950405,0.0,0.14041112855402366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6103116005273769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2996400614396498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5786242748843987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551951716855826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16079932883925055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16288919095170598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321537260026838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674004036947148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1494317617404614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196776181312624,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yaaaaawp,2020/04/11,"[Serious] I aim to become a therapist, but it's so hard to play that role with close friends and family. Can anyone help me out? My question is posted in the text below. Reddit, what are the things you can say to a person (a friend) who is contemplating suicide? The thoughts stem from preconceived notions about their existence being pointless, that they aren't worthy, that death would bring them peace. How do I help them heal?",5.424219409282698,7.25774865822785,5.079177215189876,82.09868143459916,68.74683544303798,8.30464135021097,27.090717299578056,8.841846274778883,2.0770995780590717,340,11,61,6,6,104,65,79,0.11699999999999999,0.6409999999999999,0.243,0.9273,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,1,4,0,3,4,0,0,6,0,9,1,0,1,0,9,11,4,2,1,1,0,1,0,2,1,1,1,0,1,7,4,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,9,3,9,8,0,6,0,0,0,0,14,4,0,1,0,44,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17892165701635365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826063244987974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24122683897590555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3953942554041744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22922387181231094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3430303983534997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234300551617695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450683506643996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2866512285899841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2034910635669039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798980901903553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29710372736806995,0.1699994936184275,0.0,0.0,0.20314514669340628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18177429228901584,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,theelaylajadde,2020/04/11,"who cares i’m ugly, I’m single, I’m getting fat, I have no friends, I have no sense of self worth. I’m not smart. I have no purpose in life. i want to die. Everyone is sad so it doesn’t matter. Nothing I say or do matters. I don’t matter. I will never be good enough to anyone. People think I’m a joke. i want to fucking kill myself. I’m so sorry",-2.5178270042194093,-0.7948090379746837,1.1673734177215174,98.4187394514768,101.40506329113924,3.1396624472573844,15.444092827004221,4.7782277997778095,-1.0292033755274268,262,7,64,1,12,95,50,79,0.322,0.489,0.18899999999999997,-0.94,0,0,0,0,0,2,14.0,0,0,0,0,2,8,2,0,1,0,9,3,1,0,1,9,21,3,2,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,7,3,0,0,0,1,9,5,5,19,2,2,0,1,0,1,4,1,1,1,1,36,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17754942110317748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588922315776554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26353280924425115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623711577778049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426350672640986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19618089370845845,0.2347484562974212,0.13266470228307925,0.0,0.0,0.21297923145356304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28092905662113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17935388544024036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19584168418681566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24364672913936306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17603878708565998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20193039310311875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2648978963353329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842468988418394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270411449144234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2995416658129747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tceaugie,2020/04/11,"How can I improve my skills at comforting those who aren't feeling well? Couldn't figure a good way to format that title. 

I'm an admin of a reasonably sized community online, which we have a venting channel. Often, members come here to voice their concerns & gripes with life; sometimes trite little things, sometimes it's a little heavier.   


And that's my issue. I usually try to 'help out' for whatever that's worth, but oftentimes I feel it isn't enough. Today, for example, someone came into the chat and just said they feel pathetic, hates them-self, and that they can't hold real relationships. I replied saying I think it's likely untrue, and that I think us as humans get in our heads about ourselves too much. I feel like I'm just not *actually* saying anything worthwhile. I really, really want to be able to help, but I just don't know how.   


Do you have recommendations? Is the type of thing I'm saying wrong? I offered my DMs to be open if they ever need to talk, but again, what am I truly going to provide?   


Any help, advice, input, whatever, would be awesome. 

tl;dr- i want to give advice to those who are feeling down on themselves, but i really don't feel as if im doing a good job.",4.444872506942686,5.7869901244635225,5.556152486745773,79.6394092400909,70.5021459227468,8.05746023731381,27.01060338298409,8.4952907291091,1.9459797525877307,941,31,174,15,17,312,144,233,0.098,0.752,0.15,0.9219,1,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,3,1,4,1,12,9,1,0,8,0,18,2,1,3,1,43,40,14,0,7,10,0,6,2,0,1,1,5,0,1,16,11,0,1,11,2,1,3,7,3,1,0,2,11,24,6,24,33,2,17,0,0,0,0,23,9,0,3,6,114,40,2,0.11596602416843775,0.0,0.11316611128829833,0.0,0.0,0.22664131335414114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564913873640918,0.0,0.07886087307895125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09543015694499887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13263423794735296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989446148758396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11982390263826093,0.0,0.0,0.1048979080405312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3518154372523222,0.0828461508370392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06058746130687046,0.11124517732098382,0.06590616397299888,0.19453359820347008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11449244034619326,0.11901459699559973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331887446236796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526320597157115,0.12103840031289485,0.11507838513609958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06373189410943769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191023239294166,0.11331028347711901,0.2324568431688834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524837098555803,0.08598733752073984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319947236973548,0.2228724136861788,0.11923238695920535,0.0,0.12450411088388134,0.0,0.0,0.11031024493651036,0.2766625108623968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12097785445778972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825763595394496,0.0,0.22938672629228976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09320909751166767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1540853471249915,0.14861269156861787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099222313603816,0.0,0.0,0.07873331820062024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949284855467867,0.0,0.1277201920650448,0.0,0.13679953126125455,0.09204843221079,0.0,0.0,0.10426738268704902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237893634148036,0.12679064277672872,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheSlavGoblin,2020/04/11,"I'm incapable of socializing like a normal person anymore. I've had a pattern of social disorders for awhile, I got bullied a lot as a kid and dealt with a lot of rejection and just a lot of bad experiences in general and they've all taken their toll and fucked up my head in one way or another. My experiences don't allow me to trust people or build meaningful relationships because I'm an obnoxious misanthrope and assume people dont like me if i dont hate them already. All my conversations always end up being about some edgy political shit and I know it annoys most my friends (other than a couple) but i dont catch myself until afterwards. I also isolate myself more than I should and my social skills end up practically atrophied and I end up coming across as almost autistic. I was supposed to start classes and i had hoped that would help with my isolation but everything going on with this virus has changed that. 

I've been told I should take meds but my paranoid/stubborn ass refuses to, as far as being depressed and anxious I feel like those feelings are a natural response to shitty circumstances and I dont want to further scramble my brains by adding in whatever sort of drugs my doctors want to put me on. I'm not dangerous or unhinged I just hate the idea of medication. Well anyway apologies for the lack of structured thought here, but I guess I'm just sort of wondering how I'm supposed to help my isolation with current circumstances, am I just supposed to get worse? How do I become a gentler person without resorting to medication? I'm tired of feeling like a loser or the odd one out and constantly thinking my friends would rather not have me around. How do I stop hating people over nothing? Thanks for reading.",6.415091353762051,7.2448095135951736,6.991583944756153,73.01008056394764,65.64652567975831,10.050985469716588,35.39936699755431,10.07000556051586,3.738728844770536,1403,65,241,31,21,461,183,331,0.20600000000000002,0.657,0.13699999999999998,-0.9774,1,2,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,2,14,22,7,0,14,0,21,10,4,4,2,73,51,30,0,11,17,0,3,4,2,4,5,0,0,3,6,19,0,2,10,1,0,4,8,11,1,2,8,3,36,11,48,37,9,29,0,3,0,2,17,15,3,17,13,171,42,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715952612809849,0.0,0.09605250044554706,0.06960708564898749,0.07242553149175035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912706407799668,0.0,0.09833216136122616,0.08632181589238637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07748542175997435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267604762301791,0.053059713032334886,0.0961305390513154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716714159703492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207840479361726,0.07497857689513525,0.0,0.09406097936681412,0.0,0.0,0.09630980507496607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496874822892821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975714226596434,0.08909070133060834,0.0,0.0,0.40804813219968783,0.0,0.10094054899904163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23127889931344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822732093693902,0.1702866501905452,0.0,0.0,0.1320324491573415,0.12436498277280322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344961510582135,0.08046849833852886,0.0454756105476663,0.0,0.04946771131978204,0.0,0.06961506849195226,0.0,0.09588606609636947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2578064924092628,0.0893297283912705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668421491695845,0.0,0.0,0.0864518859262785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825930048046687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04783575237302843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17009639325709167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219988062316515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09668352543782192,0.17537038247924022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528222553954869,0.08351870222353495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11796319617545115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810309265016626,0.15200262542643442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750078566519519,0.0,0.0,0.08706509162269578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09345003629483327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08934688685523083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26618365655364845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06160844785116437,0.0,0.0,0.07277062234941724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06544440333094545,0.0,0.0,0.08013615282116929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05577270229218657,0.0,0.06910125770160812,0.0,0.10004144239281876,0.0,0.08317191863563468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102678707319177,0.06908952057818721,0.0,0.0,0.07826079498338442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08390493553207239,0.09439283387525207,0.0,0.0,0.08870276231516498,0.1236636210063927,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kaikaiyaaa,2020/04/11,"Mental health problem or physical health problem? I'm female,20 years old,from third world country with bad mental health facility and lack of awareness about it in our country,so maybe if it's mental health problem my doctor probably will overlooked it.

So I always have really bad mental health,never get diagnosed but I always know there is something wrong with me.And I actually have really bad sleeping habit,I can awake for more than 24 hours if I want to and maybe it's a big factor that make my mental health not good.

But for last 2 months,I think I'm at worse condition that I never felt before.

The first attack come at me while I tried to sleep on 4 am,my heartbeat suddenly increasing so much and I thought maybe I could collapse because I'm unable to breathe too.but It stop after about 10 minutes than comeback again few minutes later,and It disappeared again and come again until 6 am I can control my heartbeat.

Not sure why but after that,I feel normal for few days than it come again for second time,than third time in every few days.and I ignored all of it because I think it's not serious problem.

Then I got my worse attack at the fourth time,after I'm eating my lunch.My heartbeat shoot very high until I feel so dizzy and can't see properly,like my brain feels like lack of oxygen.but it finally go away by itself but after my fourth attack my heartbeat is getting easily increased even by slight sudden movement (like if I suddenly standing up from sitting position).So for five days after the fourth attack I try to lived with my heart that always increasing it's beat for like ten times in a day until finally I decided to go to doctor.

And the doctor give me beta blocker ( bisoprolol),and advice me to take thyroid test,the test came back normal (at least in paper,but I have not yet consulted to my doctor).

And my life after taking beta blocker is actually kinda back to normal,but sometimes my heart still beat fast but It easily can back to normal not like when I'm not taking beta blocker.

But I think I have another problem,sometimes when I'm alone I feel like I can't breathe out of nowhere but it only happens for short time.and it only happens recently,and I often feel I can't breath properly when I sleep.I think I feel like this after I'm taking beta blockers

So do you guys have opinion why my condition like this?,maybe give me opinion if it's not because thyroid problem or mental health problem than why?,and sorry if it's bit messy because I'm not really good at english.",6.628625646109184,6.982986478439425,6.781486936203357,76.35303901437375,65.11909650924025,9.099171564115274,33.220208171068464,8.841846274778883,2.8387001203710263,2033,80,354,29,29,653,206,487,0.18899999999999997,0.75,0.062,-0.9962,0,1,2,1,0,0,46.0,1,1,0,4,21,26,4,0,6,0,18,23,8,2,3,79,59,33,0,18,22,0,7,7,0,1,14,0,0,1,21,15,1,7,14,0,0,11,12,16,0,6,4,8,44,10,55,53,13,70,0,0,1,0,6,17,0,11,47,210,65,6,0.0,0.0,0.10051772794712044,0.0,0.0,0.05032750003062378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053340901960969016,0.0,0.0,0.12856224207513087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05400470420040095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343654314757736,0.04838815286758163,0.1188063835351171,0.12900693215676892,0.12558141732246303,0.0,0.043824706240914856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056227226846788485,0.0,0.0,0.05749365508013535,0.0,0.05890496763868318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13309414173010484,0.0,0.0,0.057764264487318,0.04112043542625795,0.0,0.0,0.09964426456001377,0.0,0.0,0.05227380079795856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21085934891000865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05269976128694344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034016816226060086,0.0,0.04339295087414943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15624681279024755,0.11037986668228868,0.0494503323290693,0.11283661329456528,0.0,0.04380787231835265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053815704041784325,0.09881149349466144,0.058539944377864514,0.0863954547796359,0.0411911338593749,0.0,0.0,0.05099542336006082,0.09108671544611856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3832121253769332,0.0,0.12206106466351095,0.0,0.05441506010037238,0.0,0.0,0.05071944006552467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028304344475206692,0.04198128890717058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03637763267655235,0.1761301259482994,0.0,0.04547751832439825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03437821832626955,0.0,0.20696413051469206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31141352990580023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03786015294292246,0.0,0.03972178708377695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018454707650572,0.0,0.0,0.05404305234975091,0.0,0.0,0.07833971541586911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0555282437608326,0.3449655516219898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989811719727348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04104070465439876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15461863214958535,0.0,0.0,0.0396490249522443,0.10187428146836552,0.057652663894827476,0.0,0.0,0.04112984297385617,0.043058270445735264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04854035505763697,0.0,0.15489342961795866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320025043763106,0.0,0.040887112768798764,0.15015717131421222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993342944428231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04249483223921277,0.03037742021456703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09294571979621484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497058856280987,0.0,0.05630973438860925,0.0,0.033165824615889634
mentalhealth,showtimeXXI,2020/04/11,"declining mental state my mental health state has varied over the past couple of years. 

as an 18 year old male in college, i’ve gone through quite a bit in my short time alive. my parents got divorced out of nowhere when i was 16, and my girlfriend of 3 years ghosted, cheated, and abandoned me as we moved into separate colleges. i’ve been suicidal quite a few times as i was bullied all up until high school, and i was hospitalized in september for a suicide attempt. 

for a while after my release from the hospital i was feeling really good. i felt like a new me. but shortly after the excitement of getting back to college and having fun, i started to realize how much i’ve really changed. i feel really quite and more observant, always stressed when forced to interact with others. i find myself constantly zoning out and feeling uncomfortable when around others. i feel like i don’t know how to have basic conversations or interactions, and i cannot concentrate whatsoever. i feel like i have a thick fog in my brain that severely dampens my memory and ability to focus. high school was pretty easy for me, but sitting down to do homework for college is one of the most daunting and difficult tasks i can imagine doing. it is so overwhelming. 

on top of being diagnosed with anxiety and depression by my therapist and briefly by the hospital when i was admitted, i also have a long concussion history as i play ice hockey. that may play a role in everything. 

i sometimes feel like i’m not real. i guess this would be classified as depersonalization?? i just feel like i’m not real or life isn’t real. i feel uncomfortable in my own skin. i feel like i’m always trying to crawl out of it. it’s uncomfortable, almost unbearable. my anxiety is constant and the anti depressants i’m supposed to take make me a literal zombie. i’ve started taking LSD every couple of months in order to feel something different and i’ve convinced myself that it’s a positive way of discovering my deeper self(dumb, i know). 

i’ve started to wonder if my mental illnesses go deeper than just anxiety and depression. i don’t communicate this to others often, as i am super uncomfortable and sharing this information and i feel like it’s selfish to talk about myself so much like i’m such a victim. it makes me feel pathetic, weak, and wrong. i don’t know how else to cope with this other than to drink or smoke it away and just hope it gets better, but i’m scared that i’m going to fall back into the cycle of constant up and down, with the ups being really good and the downs being starvation, self harm, isolation, and suicidal ideation. my mind and thoughts scare me.",6.057514789327537,7.0737458585657365,7.078982252806956,71.40425872268503,66.50996015936255,10.546999879270796,33.53881443921285,10.570968289372207,3.845956706507305,2119,92,362,56,33,712,244,502,0.188,0.652,0.16,-0.9624,2,1,3,0,1,1,51.0,1,0,0,7,19,34,2,4,21,0,30,8,2,5,1,86,71,47,4,3,12,1,15,8,1,2,5,0,1,2,20,33,1,1,23,4,0,5,7,15,0,1,11,15,50,19,71,54,8,64,0,5,0,0,14,28,0,11,34,249,70,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587221458283987,0.0,0.0,0.05260667520859834,0.10947352202647613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15097154204807167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856085451535525,0.0,0.0,0.06180533374263221,0.10116619806005646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05817975516525749,0.07181804459861241,0.0,0.0,0.0734356310321614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06958973629682667,0.0,0.0,0.2132642968119139,0.0,0.0,0.14557537031593434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997651397570512,0.06676840327331912,0.0,0.06872927805943428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444233764709316,0.0,0.0,0.054953290796219724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05542505038772083,0.0,0.05912155675818322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.399142593318275,0.2819725116366923,0.0631620368243032,0.0,0.060124508956818375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06873784907639181,0.0,0.07477203788808047,0.11035138975266193,0.05261270837064174,0.0,0.0724674376054024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992429787502387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900679198614715,0.0,0.06533740411182813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845791911775504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04646450825461257,0.2571061733385472,0.0,0.0,0.058215922417051424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782138317809926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19888150308682265,0.0,0.06642212014627473,0.0,0.05250739680498434,0.06991696337591091,0.09671621045704816,0.0,0.0,0.0635336722314493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690282370580978,0.0,0.044576291981708586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304428364266978,0.0,0.06279735743909315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692500351082734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2099050888340533,0.0,0.2246265118396689,0.1685692056277492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172060269393351,0.13315190171483982,0.0,0.0,0.13725211986002553,0.07431611346832408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064299987745916,0.06506111096215797,0.0,0.13968472789777905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07535425276577318,0.0,0.0,0.21586791396632532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892132210829424,0.05287391763167641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07637918240760122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222438759676805,0.07671724202675327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04466236765018627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05221551707685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07133890332279406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0467303858849112,0.07192343002575348,0.0,0.12708636749438582
mentalhealth,canttellyamyname,2020/04/11,"I dont know my mental health conditions right now Whenever i feel sad, my chest literally hurts. Even if i just feel sad for just tiny bit, my chest would physically hurt. And i dont really know what's wrong with me, i just feel.... heavy all the time, and for the past couple of years, i cant even study: i'm one of the top students in school for a couple years then i just fall apart, i cant study anything and i also dont want to study. Even if i study i still cant remember like atleast 50% of the lessons that i learned. I sometimes cry at night because the dark atmosphere just keeps making me think of the past. I have to put on a fake person and try to be as positive as possible but i just cant. I dont have friends.
What should i do :(",1.718403483309146,3.0437223207547213,3.2064150943396257,93.85850507982586,77.36477987421385,7.15645863570392,22.293662312530238,7.882392219407189,0.6911795839380748,575,16,140,9,13,189,87,159,0.145,0.8109999999999999,0.044000000000000004,-0.8939,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,2,12,8,0,0,8,0,14,3,2,1,1,29,24,11,0,5,9,0,3,1,1,2,1,0,0,1,3,5,0,1,9,0,0,2,8,6,0,1,0,3,22,2,16,21,2,17,0,4,0,0,2,6,0,2,10,85,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903268855006002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019075920507362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549010257066001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519831874579713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27404735714416,0.13602952019701164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5805458339879973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453802163521118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18784766369673214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567643376205356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316333181308336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651409009178608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100723316600114,0.0,0.0,0.13611554404691065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06050067669067509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08266239649080374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12479892761052698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11621296927912375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08391539710571846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2364335368609662,0.0,0.10813000230003507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13960801155970426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449074650768514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07933338104845376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14028358327049215,0.10575642506574726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12533001525078966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122478311223576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889667216731317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793499771495989,0.0,0.0,0.07221055793707762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840774355701203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304248086136284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08797050436687036,0.13539670805936602,0.0,0.15949439370732052
mentalhealth,FeetPixMafia,2020/04/11,"I live in Los Angeles, and as cases of Covid-19 rise, I’m starting to feel like people who aren’t protecting themselves deserve to become infected. I don’t like feeling this way, it’s very cynical. I’m started to lose faith in people, this whole shelter at home has furthered my alienation from the average stranger. I was already a shut in that didn’t go out on weekends, but people are acting like it’s either a summer break or house arrest, when it’s neither. I feel like people are losing touch with basic empathy, atleast in SoCal. I don’t know if my eccentricity is equal to intelligence, and I feel like I don’t fit it. I don’t wish it, as I’m not someone who worships chaos, but everyday I become more accepting of the idea of it all falling apart. Letting people tear eachother apart over toilet paper, contracting the virus all the while.",8.291829268292684,7.06407854878049,8.378170731707321,71.50798780487807,62.29268292682927,10.882926829268293,38.79268292682927,9.827888789773867,3.830343902439024,678,30,120,11,8,222,103,164,0.134,0.6890000000000001,0.17800000000000002,0.8289,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,1,11,1,0,6,0,12,1,0,0,2,20,24,10,0,2,6,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,11,4,0,1,7,1,0,4,8,3,0,0,2,5,11,8,19,21,7,26,3,2,0,0,2,13,0,2,12,75,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538957047662622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110316358987185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847951619287237,0.3017884151754241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002671850068455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14124594161882198,0.0,0.0,0.16247817041348664,0.0,0.15895963588838916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738660607679931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14398983529114331,0.0,0.3439682122438191,0.0,0.12433959737182465,0.0,0.0,0.31506527404329504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4881066392787686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930957135133195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19933495130095533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618466718691302,0.0,0.11177003073612587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721159659417785,0.16192687881473206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lolocatlover,2020/04/11,"Tips for body, sleep, and stress issues Hey y’all, I’m new to this shindig so no hate please! I just wanted to share some methods of coping with problems that have worked for me in the past. I am having a tough time right now, so my coping mechanisms are not as effective for me right now, but they have been in the past and hopefully again in the future so I’d like to share some!
1. Issues with body: A couple of years ago I’d look in the mirror and think “dang I’m a chonk”. I hated my body, and took extreme measures to lose weight. Those years were some of the most painful years of my life, but then I finally made some changes for the better. For years I was forced to do a sport that I hated. It made me feel and about myself and I began to compare myself to others. At the peak of my weight problem, I decided that I had enough and decided to quit my sport. I then did not what my parents wanted me to do, but what I wanted to do (which happened to be weightlifting). I had to endure many arguments with my family to get out of the toxic sport, but in the end it was worth it. I got a job and mad MY own schedule on my own terms. By doing what I wanted and doing what made me happy, I gained confidence in myself and my abilities. By working out an hour a day, I was able to lose the guilt that came along with eating. I was able to find happiness not by being skinny, but by living the life I wanted
 
2. Issues sleeping: Oh boy, sleep is like my worst enemy. When I’m stressed I can easily stay up the whole night freaking out. Also, when I’m stressed I tend to get really bad hallucinations and dreams that cause me to either be afraid to sleep or to wake up throughout the night. I have found a couple methods to work for me when it comes to sleep. First, before bed, if you are stressed, drink a cup of tea with valerian root in it! It doesn’t have to be tea, I just like it better, but it’s a natural sleep aid that knocks me out! I had trouble with waking up consistently throughout the night, but when I take this I am out cold all night. When going to bed, I listened to asmr. This is a touchy method, because not all of these artists are beneficial to mental health. Find an artist who includes to focus on mental well-being and stress relief (if you need recommendations for these artists hmu). Also, weighted blankets come in nice if you tend to thrash or need to feel like your wrapped in a soothing hug!

Stress relief: with all that’s happened in the past month, stress is the most abundant thing on the planet rn. When dealing with stress, it is important to recognize the fine line between coping and putting it off. It is ok to relax by watching tv (or in my case play a coloring app), but spending too much time relaxing can increase stress a lot more. Putting off stress is not necessarily getting rid of it. To reduce stress, I recommend a few things. First, find that one person to vent to. Find that friend or family member who you can tell your frustrations to, because these people can often bring a more realistic view and opinion into a stressful situation. Also, just talking about what makes me stressed helps calm me down. Also, I recommend exercising. I tend to get stressed when I feel like I am being lazy. When I feel lazy, I feel like I do not contribute to myself or society. To fix this, working out, whether that may be walking or lifting, is a great stress relief to exert yourself or to release beneficial chemicals such as endorphins (which also helps with depression).

Ik this is very long I apologize! Hmu with any questions or don’t! Thanks y’all who took the thirty minutes to read this book I wrote",3.900041666666666,5.279059587500001,4.605833333333333,85.78916666666667,71.875,7.5,25.833333333333336,7.984000788550335,1.403166666666667,2853,90,577,39,54,915,309,720,0.156,0.6609999999999999,0.182,0.97,2,0,4,0,0,0,89.0,0,8,1,13,27,60,5,17,38,1,48,25,12,7,3,110,97,54,0,13,30,1,9,6,1,1,5,1,2,2,45,35,8,0,15,16,2,11,9,33,0,3,20,15,71,27,105,70,22,82,0,3,4,1,28,30,1,23,46,398,116,7,0.08222689792313724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0364445918608692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16439205140343216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02795855513410485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0343280125729994,0.05012475377147089,0.0,0.03498451691769484,0.0,0.0,0.07272300911503234,0.0,0.13700332029807366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04702283286425878,0.0,0.04223483730426925,0.04349257755255136,0.07083119169366091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909824985713572,0.0,0.02651477334944094,0.04238616059389143,0.03541095334647214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040275527928846415,0.0,0.04206932227147005,0.0,0.0,0.03641431266178123,0.04248118309496127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07751620135542373,0.0,0.10394097557945214,0.08811436845900046,0.0,0.045037773727889606,0.15030779007178022,0.06994215736779026,0.0,0.04507877470363562,0.0317641486813882,0.0,0.08592032074956628,0.0,0.023365720504662568,0.0,0.03288218091960566,0.04532772262335452,0.0,0.0,0.07271297427492962,0.08753206184213358,0.0,0.12177305731776045,0.0,0.04370167369459995,0.0,0.0,0.05511495640925971,0.0,0.0,0.04083493150908312,0.04048846555351869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873527731948847,0.04079875418511129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580792897413825,0.12051572665259964,0.0,0.036303928666367585,0.0363841085661993,0.034524942441002945,0.09199086595007117,0.0,0.03495318407627762,0.0,0.1167076184671333,0.02744354643301031,0.04168258423605143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286537313372991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03281636271594128,0.0,0.030223115560820583,0.06097020291676585,0.0,0.03970762520119928,0.0,0.1543287469960755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02785953704078114,0.0,0.04374760840879007,0.0,0.04565161962316908,0.0,0.11774231735260612,0.028502888843956038,0.035898677813589124,0.0,0.045130220822793436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07868003632731252,0.0,0.08266074363435273,0.046056472091772944,0.04372921372509233,0.04112457484474767,0.0,0.026338328174808658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07022132154622196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046213239218788206,0.2468588436162936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04382146627458342,0.0,0.0,0.7064297531644899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030912196987245164,0.03304543292554138,0.035934966541027784,0.037851740037740216,0.0,0.0,0.05462789726711266,0.0263438380062643,0.0,0.0,0.04794716543017812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135710911254978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03392290114199082,0.12124888705132594,0.0,0.0,0.15019531442265974,0.03696592814317645,0.0,0.0,0.04590169751968399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972432201134325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590285269550907
mentalhealth,iHolyPopcorni,2020/04/11,"Unnatural Obsession with my Appearance I’m a 16 year old guy. Over the past few months I’ve developed an unnatural obsession with my appearance.

People tell me I’m attractive, but I physically cannot see it. I used to be confident. Not anymore. And nothing about my appearance has changed.

My appearance consumes my every thought. I spend hours a day looking in the mirror or taking selfies from every angle and analyzing how I think my face is too wide and chubby, how my nose is disproportionate to my face, how my ears are too big, how my chin fat comes down when I speak, every last blemish and pore. I see a disgusting, chubby faced, unattractive person when I look in the mirror.

Other people tell me that my face is slim, I look good, that my skin is good, and that I am attractive, but this will only boost my confidence until I see myself again in the mirror and hate it.

I can’t be happy unless I look good. I physically cannot bring myself to be completely happy unless I feel like I look good. 

Please help. I’ve completely lost everything because of this. I don’t talk to my friends anymore, and all I can ever think about is the way I look.",4.313637079831935,5.866876808035716,5.6157878151260485,78.26891806722689,71.09821428571429,9.020588235294117,27.908613445378148,9.478462496947786,2.5566326680672278,911,33,171,21,17,305,116,224,0.081,0.691,0.228,0.9907,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,0,1,12,15,2,2,9,0,17,8,8,5,2,31,42,19,0,0,6,0,2,1,1,1,1,2,0,2,8,10,1,0,4,0,1,6,5,5,0,0,2,14,36,10,18,36,2,26,0,1,9,0,8,7,0,5,13,111,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101451327004828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06458529817149625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207959653169283,0.09126535875336744,0.22217023425483928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06832809795059602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583659661638737,0.2677988572355505,0.0,0.09521979217623387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05357080799352232,0.07568971857781866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185564454259046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3554587184361533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10490579556477383,0.0,0.2255685619689839,0.0,0.1046023321727661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07101512976263345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433805349757927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636226981675738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0517611463037436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5338209648842301,0.0,0.11565543929375174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456718134022448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166056274590532,0.0,0.11117525903196224,0.0,0.0,0.08057870322982966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113995050949792,0.14690287223185655,0.09251025236448136,0.0,0.1162997740268022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532820097546583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966018022391058,0.08515749118420622,0.18520753553554384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13577520124075393,0.0,0.08411137334956995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150559440658784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409708669831434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06822744057492441
mentalhealth,sakuralove9789,2020/04/11,"Self doubt and concerns 
I’ve had a lot of practice with dealing with anxiety issues and such in the past, but I have never felt more worried about my future until now. I understand that these feelings are all normal for someone in their 20s, but with Covid-19, the inevitable downfall of the economy, and not the most stellar resume, no connections, I just feel so helpless. I’ve been talking to multiple counselors about how to boost my resume and to get a cs job, and have made some efforts to improve, but so far I haven’t had much luck. I just feel so overwhelmed, and no amount of yoga or talking with friends is helping me at the moment. This virus isn’t helping either.",8.963255813953488,7.3452127286821725,8.070968992248067,75.49156976744189,61.24806201550388,10.150387596899224,40.87984496124031,8.344100000000001,3.5498775193798444,538,25,96,5,6,167,86,129,0.102,0.722,0.177,0.8988,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,10,5,0,2,7,0,9,0,0,2,2,33,16,15,0,1,8,0,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,10,0,0,5,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,5,4,9,2,18,11,8,10,0,2,0,0,8,4,0,6,6,75,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16797057949768934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263672045660236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3330638267601451,0.0,0.21082179695007194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16963936911666505,0.0,0.11471635169934714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2943465139878794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22917421195606166,0.2178895140597139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18667070711681555,0.0,0.2077626043799651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16140933943813784,0.0,0.1693460516168714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21513214799927446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20960457269375965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22905957438158076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604109299362534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35296437187127033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285802911235462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22298416640570548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LindenTreeEducation,2020/04/11,"Mental Health Pandemic Ignoring me will mean ignoring a catastrophe that is about to effect each and every organisation on earth. Shortly, it will become apparent that those people suffering with anxiety conditions like GAD, panic disorder, OCD, agoraphobia, monophobia and eating disorders are joined by a new and enormous body of sufferers. Those predisposed, who have never suffered previously but were 'waiting in the wings' waiting to have it activated have now been activated. 

Due to war-like trauma and isolation, they are no longer waiting; many will still be unaware that they have developed anxiety or were predisposed. Sweden recognised that the mental health trauma of lockdown would be more costly and mentally impactful than COVID19's threat to life and if you want to understand and stop the impact of this tsunami of mental health need, you need to understand the science; but the science doesn't lie in psychiatry, psychology or medicine. If you or your company want to understand and prevent the impact of massively escalated mental health issues and the HR and financial burden they will bring to you, no one else will be able to explain or intervene to prevent the next pandemic... one that will disarm all organisations globally. 

charles.linden@lindentree.education 

01562 702720

[\#mentalhealth](https://www.linkedin.com/feed/hashtag/?highlightedUpdateUrns=urn%3Ali%3Aactivity%3A6654640374302167040&keywords=%23mentalhealth&originTrackingId=RFs0d7XfT%2Bioj%2FWiIJA%2FrQ%3D%3D)",18.190993343573986,17.384104986175114,14.041904761904767,37.333650793650826,42.91705069124424,17.386379928315414,51.30005120327701,15.4700424275458,8.318267178699438,1270,59,140,42,9,372,133,217,0.209,0.755,0.037000000000000005,-0.9908,1,2,0,0,0,0,56.0,0,5,3,1,3,11,1,1,10,0,21,7,1,1,2,41,34,18,0,7,8,0,0,1,0,7,5,0,0,0,11,12,1,8,6,0,1,1,4,10,0,2,3,0,9,1,22,21,3,14,0,3,0,0,10,6,0,6,8,101,20,0,0.10705951384469277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319978770434644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16380047011282878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182388218026436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891898504170055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453989561346359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10954861010005253,0.08943448624047573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09020225785312354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4551970275533665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.111742317518933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07561930075447783,0.05230387067959142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854154338337127,0.0,0.11661919614882185,0.0,0.0,0.5394540464452993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15876654593933093,0.08257089708670229,0.10339874560126112,0.1138590075375345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14509259460631935,0.0,0.0,0.1256112722358684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422158684997916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549786605078348,0.0895065473818591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33435818870660483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12629295016391404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07605200694775696,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aditiijoshi,2020/04/11,"Helping to create awareness around Mental Health Hey Everyone, 

Hope things are fine with you. Sending my wishes to everyone. I have recently started an online page to spread awareness around mental health and help people in my own capacity. The page is for my NGO which would be working towards the same goal. Looking for suggestions from the community on what sort of content you think will be most beneficial to help out people?

Happy to have a chat! :) 

Take care",4.607750677506772,7.769668609756103,4.656016260162605,77.90917344173445,76.3170731707317,7.059078590785908,28.62330623306233,8.167268648758528,2.5180119241192407,374,16,58,7,9,116,62,82,0.0,0.7040000000000001,0.29600000000000004,0.9785,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,0,2,2,4,0,0,5,0,8,2,0,0,0,12,15,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,4,16,11,5,9,0,0,1,0,9,6,0,3,2,42,9,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3224657397892163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846612427057149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461308419486793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19280282195938556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38503861718067534,0.0,0.0,0.3641974918986364,0.0,0.0,0.17989042789072615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15209298605614735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.365047445396978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511279769929598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17883156544827994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819581582153378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361777316031748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032634133310165,0.11605270576189748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20827605191774232,0.0,0.0,0.1318556118476468,0.0,0.0,0.1286605922994362,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Smileyopi,2020/04/11,Friendships Hi I feel like I have move too to many places and I keep loosing contact to my friends because of distance any tips how to reconnect with them? I have them on social media I just feel like I don’t really have friends?,1.907608695652172,4.374768456521739,2.6197391304347843,92.66656521739132,81.82608695652175,5.419130434782609,26.591304347826085,6.742157984588678,1.1299791304347826,183,8,37,2,5,57,33,46,0.0,0.706,0.294,0.9211,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,2,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,7,7,2,0,0,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,9,4,6,7,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,23,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190603399839698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17085912414185928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2834410180793901,0.4004712957555835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43309496521878055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491301712310995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2738661699308953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28416498032134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978985797862772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29283815164512444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17955773723401205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28571524307540164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZY0Ns,2020/04/11,"I can't stand being with my family I am not angry at them, I don't know why I feel like this. I share my room with my older brother and even if he makes a slight noise I get nervous.
When my family is around, I don't feel like doing anything, I feel judged , I feel as if they are always watching me ready to mock me for whatever I do.
My mother always liked to mock me in public for some reason, I even tried to tell her when I was younger but she said she doesen't care. I still remember that day when I was 14 and played a lot of videogames, I went to her shop to take something I needed then she started ranting out loud about how I only play videogames all day, in front of all the customers that started looking at me.
Every. Single. Day. That she comes home from work,  she starts complaining about me. If there is a problem, instead of looking for a way to solve it, my brother and mother just try to find who did it and start accusing and ranting,  so we get nothing done. I don't know what to say, with this lockdown, Im feeling like trash and starting to loose my mind",3.7279729729729714,4.36868287837838,4.427045045045045,89.68327027027028,71.56756756756756,7.0010810810810815,26.962162162162162,6.742157984588678,1.0191545945945948,837,27,182,6,15,268,128,222,0.08900000000000001,0.8009999999999999,0.11,0.3837,0,1,1,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,2,1,14,13,2,1,5,0,15,0,0,3,2,38,38,17,0,5,6,4,5,4,0,0,0,3,2,0,9,13,0,0,10,3,1,3,5,5,0,0,6,11,40,8,28,31,5,26,0,0,3,0,22,7,0,5,18,125,49,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2010045936521182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939526988957224,0.1075237239826173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314774589049468,0.0,0.0,0.1040450658145148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336878377083485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236043768810506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15955391441125102,0.0,0.10176606658035198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277295659967851,0.0,0.30536110960157203,0.2588651989697244,0.0,0.0,0.11039475361426294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126209727853455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12115660158647455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13046787895312034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327598951604401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23603662758227084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20285695172557536,0.0,0.0,0.10268657778261342,0.0,0.0,0.08062452505826734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12195781246797885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956010231530462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11589588959182234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186197912673567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11557435872840588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418648004758627,0.0,0.0,0.13682517994640536,0.0,0.11489362396593925,0.09605260299195792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298573228721962,0.0,0.0,0.4274591007755175,0.0,0.09645857804545804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081483716719707,0.0,0.10557088958700196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640093585167751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587303484973404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119683490982561,0.10898913439389073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08793248190107181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lighterstothesky,2020/04/11,Struggling with addiction because of depression cant stop smoking drinking etc; because i feel sad and depressed all the time. im trying to learn of good ways to get through this and off the drugs and liquor everything i do doesn't seem to work,6.345673758865246,7.206185553191488,5.583829787234047,82.93333333333334,65.80851063829788,8.819858156028369,36.94326241134753,8.841846274778883,3.16489219858156,199,10,37,3,3,60,38,47,0.24,0.6709999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.8447,0,0,2,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,1,2,0,3,4,0,0,1,9,6,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,2,1,3,2,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,8,6,2,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,21,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26456491747391664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2958797822774855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4180523345475546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2377411067000673,0.2814401544407677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706604280562329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2181116459569548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227099622847894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267940682187584,0.0,0.0,0.20355454568827014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26214386839573245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22093335185074345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20289740243997706,0.0,0.2537094000292329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415128833648072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16476870797500506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19263383778453816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17667920371011284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonyme2365,2020/04/11,"Important Hello, 1 month ago my girlfriend smoked cannabis and it was her second time, she has had a badtrip and its effects have been going on ever since.  For 1 month she has been dizzy, she is stressed, her heart is beating fast, sometimes she goes crazy like a 7 year old kid, she has no tolerance for vaping, cigarettes, drugs (whenever she feels or sees them  she stresses).  Many tell me that she has a psychosis and I would like to know if I should worry or if the effects will eventually disappear without medication or psychiatrist",11.30742424242424,8.423712242424248,9.915025252525254,68.05920454545456,57.88888888888889,13.53636363636364,43.94191919191918,11.698219412168324,4.968149494949495,428,19,77,9,4,133,73,99,0.158,0.757,0.085,-0.7717,0,0,3,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,3,1,4,0,2,4,0,14,3,1,2,1,16,18,8,0,4,6,0,1,2,1,3,2,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,2,0,1,4,2,15,2,5,11,0,11,0,0,1,0,15,1,0,5,10,52,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832069127449703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23967999537768214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869514059491144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045022280195052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745944457447365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24491353744719635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358441202617453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019441302523885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20953829315121386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20820558674792686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3299356197297451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21687300798021394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646950103858826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17096555770119634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044090858791882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4734961852686472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806450269688516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051516706333334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19922949458777725,0.0,0.0,0.2098907806573312,0.0,0.14681758919045035,0.0,0.0,0.1330933734098267
mentalhealth,canceroushuman,2020/04/11,"I like being sad I feel like sadness is the easiest emotion for me to have, I think it’s kind of my natural state I guess. Usually if I’m happy for a while I’ll just “default” back to feeling gloomy and wallowing in my self pity. But I sort of like it, it’s like a “homey” kind of feeling I guess. I don’t feel like someone who should be happy. I guessed I’ve had a lot more time to ponder these things recently. Whatever, doubt it matters, just wanted to say it somewhere.",0.9803030303030305,3.007605262626264,3.0507979797979807,90.82286363636366,82.23232323232324,6.384242424242425,25.051515151515154,7.554174236665415,1.275734545454546,367,15,80,6,10,124,65,99,0.115,0.61,0.275,0.9325,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,3,13,0,1,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,20,17,4,0,3,4,0,4,5,0,1,0,1,0,1,8,1,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,5,11,9,10,13,2,7,0,3,0,0,3,1,0,7,10,49,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206228728432082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17645694225071304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31727149452005265,0.2241350376485872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5184279341817563,0.0,0.0,0.33398075114571874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3267106461398042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3831922846824895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333647400398678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15488959121553422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12474882993270862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16364897879732965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13291491946993694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421704789546823,0.1005155667561141,0.0,0.0,0.09147179895384837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276946344370847,0.0,0.0925256266578473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,benendjfjfjfn,2020/04/11,"Is this a sign of depression? Hi I’m 17 and lately I been feeling hopeless worthless and lonely, also I was always been unconfined about myself. I feel like it’s just a phase but also I been having breakdown and overthinking about everything wrong with me. So is this a sign of depression or just a phase, if it’s depression should I talk to my family or just keep it to myself?

Thank you",1.3211688311688334,3.952457805194808,3.1974155844155843,85.85326623376626,87.83116883116884,6.716363636363638,20.687012987012988,7.908726449838941,1.3928296103896107,309,10,58,7,10,103,48,77,0.27,0.655,0.07400000000000001,-0.9546,0,2,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,1,0,0,8,9,0,0,4,0,8,0,0,0,0,17,13,10,0,2,7,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,4,2,10,2,7,8,0,1,0,6,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,47,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754555248684098,0.1953290077193759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6065639105398176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21097622151240872,0.0,0.22129937105567926,0.0,0.2373911220667632,0.16770390344195074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086546657571997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26480578784951625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468593680716355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18868142129808504,0.0,0.21612427124252745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566599111574525,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,turtlesinabucket,2020/04/11,I dont know how I can help my girlfriend My girlfriend is suicidal and her parents and family dont believe in getting mental help for her so she cant get a counciler or meds to help her. What do I do? Is there some way I can help get her one? Thank you.,-0.8608928571428578,1.1852618392857153,1.8585714285714303,95.98642857142859,91.32142857142857,5.342857142857143,20.5,6.868970318607317,0.3759928571428573,197,7,47,3,7,68,36,56,0.075,0.698,0.22699999999999998,0.7998,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,9,0,0,1,0,6,14,5,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,12,1,3,14,1,2,0,0,0,0,13,1,0,2,0,34,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289543303817668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4763342115925514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19157353052929235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185152052549321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.544844386059491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168194923334318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257266593288845,0.0,0.20479347300659576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13770411285615974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22564681428313824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22228482350394055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870935713802103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16130304107267934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Yannyy788,2020/04/11,"What's wrong with my mom? My mom have been suffering from a mental illness for the past 20 years. She was never treated because we live in a country with no mental health services and we couldn't afford to treat her outside of country.

She is passive, doesn't talk and barely leaves her bed for four years. During this period she is calm and self aware. But suddenly something will switch and the next four years she becomes hyper active, sensitive and she never sleeps. This cycle was basically her life for the past 20 years.

Mental health professionals, have you ever came across a case like this? Is this a neurological disorder? Please help?",3.8244784876140803,6.80095895762712,3.9499999999999993,82.9100586701434,78.0677966101695,6.342633637548892,23.483702737940032,7.61054688173877,1.3844411994784878,519,17,88,8,13,160,78,118,0.131,0.76,0.11,-0.5744,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,2,1,0,0,1,6,0,0,7,0,11,6,1,0,3,15,12,6,0,1,1,2,0,1,0,1,5,0,1,1,5,10,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,2,0,2,4,0,13,4,10,6,0,15,0,1,0,0,16,2,0,0,13,58,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08912206912339188,0.16146624353168398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16721367570253895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755768963849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1322461307760256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3108071992991867,0.0,0.0,0.09799467499099168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548045272874509,0.0,0.0,0.10326527484939113,0.07142585989986408,0.0,0.12909714249394333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44200517449104815,0.0,0.0,0.342454985238042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22551666828826605,0.0,0.15548519478667833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791285916652163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1604835278816736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525183243449059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463054297469939,0.0,0.0,0.11255178410339356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175098982362976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598465807282719,0.0,0.3765916298092804
mentalhealth,woodrow101,2020/04/11,"I'm going to pass away from Rabies within the next few weeks. Not sure how to cope with it. My name is Leah Carter. Hi. If you’ve found this a few weeks to a few months after I posted it and I haven’t deleted it, it means I’ve probably passed away of rabies. At the current time of writing, I’m in okay condition. None of the serious neurological symptoms have set in yet. I’m feeling better about the prospect of dying after writing all of this down. I have to say, if I find myself alive within the next few weeks or months I will consider myself a very lucky individual. If I’m not alive, I won’t be surprised. And I’ll admit, I’m terrified while writing this. It feels like a nightmare I can’t wake up from and I hope the mysterious symptoms I’m dealing with go away. I am requesting that I be induced into a coma and euthanized painlessly in the case that I develop rabies.  

Let me tell you what happened. 
About nine months ago, in June of 2019, I travelled to the Philippines. I had never heard of getting a rabies vaccine before going to a third world nation and I did not consider it. I had an amazing, wonderful, experience of a lifetime, but I may have made a fatal error. I played with some feral cats, and didn’t get vaccinated afterwards. It was just something that didn’t cross my mind. I got so caught up in my trip and my love for the Philippines and everything that was going on that I didn’t worry one bit about any sort of rabies exposure. I distinctly remember one of the cats biting me, but it did not draw any blood so I really thought nothing of it at the time. I actually remember reading an article about rabies after my trip and considered getting vaccinated, but I remembered that the bite was so minimal and did not draw blood that I dismissed the thought right away. I was young and busy with school and love. I wish so badly that I just walked over to the hospital right next to my amazing school, Illinois Wesleyan, and asked for a course in the ER the moment I had the thought of getting them. But other priorities distracted me. Fast forward to March of 2020. There’s a global pandemic going on, and just weeks before I had also developed anxiety over not getting the rabies vaccine like I should have. I briefly considered going to get the vaccines once more, but I was terrified of going outside during the pandemic, didn’t want to stress the healthcare system, and doctors on a telehealth call said I likely had nothing to worry about since it had been so long since the bite happened and it didn’t draw any blood. Rabies usually emerges after 30 to 60 days, but cases have been recorded to emerge for up to years after exposure. The vaccines are also very expensive and I thought I’d probably be getting vaccinated for nothing. 

April 2020. Days after experiencing body aches, the prickling sensation begins in my right hand, likely where I was bitten. So light at first that I didn’t pay it too much mind. Over the next few days, the pricking intensified. I also felt like my salivary glands were activated, like something was stimulating them but not really there, and a louder ringing in my ears. I began to notice strange twitches and reactions in my body that I’ve never noticed before. I began to develop light tremors. The paranoia set in, and I wish I was just blissfully unaware of what is likely happening to me. I’ve pretty much scared and annoyed my wonderful boyfriend, Taj, to death. And my parents must be worried sick. I’ve reiterated to them so many times that what I’m feeling isn’t normal. At first I was sure that the symptoms were the result of anxiety attacks, but then they wouldn’t go away after I calmed down. They’d intensify. The prickling is spreading. The twitches and tremors intensify. The malaise has settled in, and hasn’t dissipated. My MD psychologist who I trust and respect a ton insisted I didn’t have rabies. But I can’t shake the feeling that something is wrong. I’m so scared. I don’t want to die so young. I always imagined myself having a longer life, but I guess everyone does when things like this happen to them. I just wish I wasn’t so painfully aware of it all as it is happening, and I hope I am wrong. I have never been so scared in my life. 

PSST! Everyone! Get your damn rabies vaccines if you plan to go to an endemic country as a precaution, or at least after handling any animal you’re unfamiliar with. Don’t wait like I did. Oops.",4.544303900325026,6.185983984741789,5.5184788732394345,78.84407258938246,70.65492957746478,8.435565185987723,30.36121343445287,8.972191858043859,2.63857798483207,3513,147,641,68,65,1155,336,852,0.13,0.745,0.125,-0.919,2,0,3,0,0,1,91.0,0,3,6,4,31,41,4,6,52,1,68,24,9,5,9,115,132,62,4,15,28,1,6,9,0,6,13,5,0,0,37,32,0,1,20,3,2,19,28,16,1,6,45,14,85,25,103,75,15,116,0,0,0,2,27,44,2,15,60,444,122,5,0.0,0.0,0.05118016044004246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04649060506795916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12582419856342986,0.043639639894488685,0.0,0.0,0.14266151202599095,0.0,0.080242766863755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04903034212039868,0.05966539748510846,0.24637578641480565,0.0,0.043790587129960784,0.0,0.0,0.13388417401322733,0.0,0.0,0.04638461460931735,0.05725792951928211,0.11651234438829842,0.0,0.0,0.053553679616212733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10147084601423563,0.05406997724217902,0.0,0.0,0.10886225003215373,0.0,0.0,0.05368115419985621,0.0458962335137035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10022964288515412,0.04713547895727165,0.05130268249395322,0.0,0.0,0.10607398462829046,0.037467747573986486,0.05035680758217314,0.0,0.04793509647152753,0.0892218309976002,0.0,0.057504814972134215,0.0,0.0,0.2192088041226974,0.0,0.26825868689429405,0.0,0.04194620954303945,0.0,0.05777566707703531,0.0,0.23189107064483705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418229848826012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053630038768444264,0.07408894390427641,0.2306041349155544,0.0,0.0,0.046413449451113684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946699203977675,0.04962609010495627,0.0,0.05317245887477996,0.0,0.057129548907659235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059119082150607,0.0,0.12558674532161487,0.0,0.07710833666764459,0.0,0.12134978440712856,0.0,0.2231095378634655,0.0,0.05138637625835568,0.15097132245022948,0.11942124024859024,0.0,0.05585374746807381,0.07107813081752784,0.0,0.055806710443218034,0.0,0.05823556555979033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050229192465806816,0.053356884826333696,0.11309226671451494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052460633253728885,0.0,0.06719706550699879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17823477979892888,0.13436692087890414,0.04988857503151442,0.04170751453324467,0.15752410889433333,0.1061571955398794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08676847509977938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112749659928478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06007722039711692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886029899018048,0.16353579919523936,0.0,0.0,0.04584050066926459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0348430846370001,0.0,0.0,0.1665464617376224,0.09174582365961027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057762344635747385,0.08654761209961882,0.061868538897099826,0.0,0.16827748420100794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809324547999134,0.0,0.1137518550182956,0.0,0.15978571842202802,0.0,0.0,0.11468389901774567,0.0,0.03377378815924914
mentalhealth,nublood30,2020/04/11,"Please give me hope. I feel hopeless at this point. It's been weeks since the lockdown in our country and I am really scared to the point that myself has taken a toll on me. I constantly worry for every action I do, I get anxious almost everyday without washing my hands every minute as if I feel like my mind is controlling me more than myself and I always get anxious for my paeents because they're frontline workers that tends a grocery and waterstation everyday and I am really scared and concerned for my friends and everyone. I keep saying to myself to be positive but I feel like the more I read and heard the news the more I feel like I'm losing hope. I don't know what to do anymore and it's deteriorating my mental health. Please help me",4.444267161410019,5.944574700680274,5.435423623995056,79.8953988868275,70.70068027210884,8.066542980828695,29.00989486703773,8.575989854853784,2.2358625850340137,599,23,111,10,11,197,86,147,0.096,0.728,0.17600000000000002,0.9187,0,1,0,0,0,1,7.0,1,0,0,3,0,10,0,2,7,0,9,3,1,1,0,23,24,11,0,3,3,0,5,3,1,0,2,2,0,0,6,8,0,2,5,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,3,7,26,6,13,20,3,10,0,2,0,0,6,5,0,4,7,74,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13304770397362045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055648306169548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30020512678434674,0.1317689519150917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0809948528411688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358266840358885,0.14902230605074726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238933590864728,0.12696068119150278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26872739356231906,0.2847619098167528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265317450949134,0.0,0.13883566923650406,0.12745870440474252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123204059793354,0.0,0.0,0.08905834837748726,0.0,0.0,0.26393500372583184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1180988235688524,0.0,0.0,0.07302055556989004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947371869351608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14864485288700616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13389928523529274,0.0,0.13415839492398038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916974404221072,0.25120564825528136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329035511233485,0.0,0.17023676759208048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1056616446695844,0.2660472835995215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990944781913056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657837047185974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12807962044435706,0.0,0.0,0.13493349253825815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kevmart96,2020/04/11,"How do I gain self esteem and self worth about myself? I’ve always felt so down and feel like I’m lost and not sure with who I am. I don’t have any dating experiences, or any job experiences or a college degree and I feel so worthless at times. I’ve been through OCD, Depression, Anxiety. I have friends that I talk to but I still at times feel alone.  I sometimes feel no one cares about me at times. My emotions are up and down at times, even with therapy but I still struggle with being myself. Hard to find myself. Not sure what I want in life.",1.1935416666666685,3.4460622232142875,2.483928571428571,93.87773809523813,83.01785714285714,5.519047619047619,20.047619047619047,6.816661863887847,0.19455119047619096,427,12,94,5,12,137,68,112,0.198,0.703,0.099,-0.8115,1,3,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,8,9,0,1,1,0,8,1,0,1,2,24,17,12,0,1,6,0,6,1,1,0,1,0,0,2,3,8,0,0,6,0,1,0,4,4,0,1,3,6,15,5,16,13,0,15,0,3,0,0,5,8,0,2,8,62,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810520226127855,0.0,0.0,0.12702171966349185,0.0,0.0,0.2076221370197859,0.0,0.11678114510378965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15564259673354486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13148207717526386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17171704567264956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082760905770537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29865301223785035,0.0,0.0,0.30874910910403425,0.10905721816843947,0.146573351918493,0.0,0.1395244873873895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794136710947713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13674946687344344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148716539584062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782519156352716,0.07457983371007224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16664166167373928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10344341095318296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3185062464303238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15098032920932022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24382197913017906,0.0,0.0,0.15958881775333753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877522641007307,0.0,0.0,0.12269881919569672,0.0,0.0,0.1745750259304007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3560589201732906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09004025036386397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LeifErik_son,2020/04/11,"Intense episodes of paranoia lasting for month or longer, feeling like I'm being watched/cameras/wiretaps Sorry for the long post in advance. I have a lot.

Hi everyone, I hope I am posting this in the right place I will be crossposting to other subs still. Does anyone here have experience with constant feelings of being watched by secret cameras in your house? The only place I felt safe before was my bathroom but I moved because of the coronavirus back with my parents. Now I feel like nowhere is safe.

No trauma experiences, but this has been happening for many years. I am a female 22 yrs old and I can remember having paranoid thoughts for as long as I can remember. It used to be stuff like I hate hearing a plane fly by because I knew it was an asteroid about to hit earth and kill me. 

More recently it's turned into feeling like when I'm in public everyone is watching me and judging my every move. Like they are studying me and often I feel like people are following me. I feel like they intend to kill me and so I'm constantly looking over my shoulders. Added to this I sometimes experience auditory hallucinations (I think?) where I hear someone calling my name (this has been happening since I was very young, literally as long as I can remember) and I say ""what?"" and my family says they didn't call me. These hallucinations happen at random times throughout the day. I usually get between 6-10 hrs of sleep per night. 

I don't drink or do drugs or anything like that. Especially recently (within past couple months) I have been finding it extremely difficult to concentrate on uni school work or even muster the willpower to start on my homework.

Another huge issue is I can't remember jack shit. Someone can tell me their name and I hear it, I try to remember it, but literally two seconds later I can't remember it. My dad can tell me to do a chore while he works, and by the time he's gone I can't remember what he said.

I started writing everything down that I need to do. But I forget about the list or lose it and I can't remember to write everything down. I have tried my phone but I have a hard time finding the right app. 

Making lists and stuff is great and all if I can even remember to CHECK the list. So I also set alarms. But I still can't find the motivation. 

Sidenote that I also sometimes have suicidal thoughts, just like a passing shadow that never really takes form but is noticeable and concerning once it's passed. I've never told anyone about these thoughts because I'm absolutely terrified of being forcibly admitted.

Regardless, I am finally ready to try to solve these problems. But I live in a conservative household (esp my mother) and they don't understand and/or believe my concerns. I'm a dependent and don't have money to pay for my own medical stuff, I'm on their insurance. I'm at such a loss. 

I've hidden my problems for this long, but I'm worried I'm getting worse. But because I've hidden them they'll say stuff like ""it's not even that bad"" but they don't know what's going on inside my head. The fear, the loneliness, the hopelessness. The distrust.

Not sure what I'm looking for advice on but I guess I'd say it's twofold:

- what is going on with my mind and is it going to last forever? 

- how the hell do I ask my parents to use their insurance to talk to a psychiatrist? 

Thanks for taking the time to read this long post. Im much obliged for any tips for dealing with parents or possible disorders.",3.6902279135338354,5.6902024479166675,4.829025689223059,81.43921992481206,73.62797619047619,8.227694235588974,29.79542606516291,8.941205832701803,2.614697023809524,2743,121,517,59,57,901,312,672,0.14400000000000002,0.754,0.102,-0.9901,4,0,2,0,0,3,74.0,0,1,10,6,21,32,6,2,28,0,55,7,4,7,4,100,112,46,3,6,22,5,8,10,0,2,2,8,2,0,36,21,1,3,29,2,3,10,15,16,0,2,15,20,77,16,68,89,6,74,1,3,4,0,44,24,2,13,46,330,113,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047423623719585466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761994253908529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03300252999549464,0.050888654702278636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067867566708468,0.0,0.03993661868159943,0.0,0.045369639324249436,0.0,0.0,0.03731710115295332,0.040521094856012935,0.11833542054838485,0.0,0.04129603849040532,0.0546774631097326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911051090394572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10488885931009237,0.0,0.0,0.053698279896150995,0.0,0.031298276988614586,0.05003300527098364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05562036952383268,0.0,0.042469529495531205,0.0,0.0,0.047541595485910366,0.056280187139851216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096162179237674,0.0,0.04088919523294298,0.0927462985294134,0.08723250082227962,0.14241696674693025,0.045750410707893686,0.05461051297079888,0.14723143515255935,0.17335165534329006,0.04659706823814527,0.053162993268270176,0.1330685006773489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05071055977605097,0.0,0.08274332004526452,0.0,0.0,0.0535052515528576,0.0534620209372851,0.0,0.12874657344020293,0.0,0.04347396137174555,0.047914004109487256,0.04980648392412168,0.0,0.16409282733002215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04820192050441709,0.0,0.05599789464805289,0.0,0.0,0.052421467719104,0.050653426483547134,0.0,0.0,0.1073840250906924,0.0,0.026671195294917432,0.07911797117621255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370964131672628,0.0,0.0428534839879684,0.21474064531514112,0.08150710528757127,0.05429342285870508,0.0,0.041259052922526164,0.0,0.0,0.03239460909170371,0.0492024974088155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04888955946144414,0.0,0.0,0.04900215731781686,0.0,0.07747345953187497,0.10316087565363803,0.03567563749517834,0.0359848880054864,0.07485971220443234,0.0,0.0,0.04554276032394256,0.0,0.0,0.05525250654409492,0.05092479017898637,0.05168359566636479,0.0,0.03690977282719141,0.0,0.0,0.16166274745564954,0.0,0.04632803020435058,0.03364506640342972,0.0,0.10140847321318948,0.0,0.0,0.05471105548034538,0.13943694336004972,0.0,0.0,0.0928746226864658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048543818103467334,0.0,0.031089999517177638,0.0,0.09583639332554883,0.0,0.4947822506310918,0.08288987966425765,0.04616379486038474,0.1543741943988554,0.0,0.04911564416062235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04981605075897939,0.04014508414325643,0.0,0.048565733291190266,0.0,0.08223978384337675,0.0,0.0959961768043145,0.05432612860397112,0.06870053727352356,0.0,0.07751333547865143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222240938911586,0.053084692552982767,0.0,0.045739596285683436,0.0,0.07297807081981457,0.03900712630206536,0.08483591555206707,0.044680534454849694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031096503371794326,0.0,0.11558382890554265,0.11319453081308592,0.0,0.0,0.046373149264706696,0.0,0.09884744845366156,0.05278744935481517,0.04740742747128812,0.05052215462285176,0.0,0.08382985991549108,0.05344969317594362,0.04004289767846745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066183337117074,0.04928526636405303,0.049456914118493886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03125217000599385
mentalhealth,throwaway2e6ot7,2020/04/11,"Some insight Throwaway bc people know my acct

Hi

Note: This is super long and complicates, a tdlr isnt enough.

I had a questions about what happened during my  (M18) childhood and if that couldve effected me.

Now I know that there are more serious problems (sexual abuse, etc.) but I really need an answer. Any help is appreciated.

If you need to clarify things feel free to ask me

So I don't really know when , but sometime before 4th grade my parents got divorced. Following that, my mom moved out to somewhere and my dad stayed with me exclusively through the proceeding. I assume that the legal fees stacked and he couldnt keep up with payments, so he sold the house. He moved into a apt for a short time before moving to a house cut in to 2 apts, that didnt work out and he is now renting a house until I go to college. So, ive spent  no more than a year exclusively with my dad, which may help you give insight further down the road. I dont remember, but eventually I began to split time between parents, presumably after divorce court. At my moms it was a small 1 room apt, the kind when there arent doors to anywhere expect the bathroom. I assume this hindered my ability to hold any friendships with kids my age. Anyway, i feel like my mom wasnt thinking of me when she moved in. I just talked to her and she said that she moved it bc ""it was cheap"" (It was a tough convo, didnt address everything). I mostly slept on the pull out bed from the couch. I dont know how she had the balls to, but she invited a family of 5 to spend some nights with us. I remember sleeping on the floor, (I was the youngest at the time.) I feel like she didnt care about me for those times, which is why maybe I'm legit mad at her all the time.  I also remember she gave me some meds for ADHD ( i was no more than a 6th grader at the time) She always said something was wrong with me and that I needed it. A few times I didnt want to take it, she made me anyways. I also remember I had outlashes. I remember I threw books and stuff at her, also some physical altercations but nothing serious, more like wrestling. I also remember taking her phone and smashing it. And one time she was working at home and I threatened to unplug her computer, and she said she would lose a lot of progress, but I did it anyway. I remember walking away seeing her head down sobbing, I didnt feel anything. Lastly, i remember, i have no clue why, but when she gave me trash to throw down the chute, i instead dumped it on some poor ladys doorstep. I did this for awhile until she caught me with a camera. We were asked to leave after that. I think that I did it because I subconciously wanted to get out of there, but I dont remember thinking that. I was very lonely too. I asked for a dog and she went and got me a fucking stuffed dog. How pathetic was my childhood huh. Now, my dad is renting the house, in which in the neighborhood I made some real friends. They even invited me to their cabin during the summer, which almost makes my cry. My mom, however, confuses me. She is a lawyer, drives a bmw, but still lives in apartments. She now lives in a $4000 a month, 2 room 1 bath condo, no more than 700 sqft. It sucks, you can tell that they threw this place up. Build quality horrible. i feel like maybe she didnt learn? Also she thinks/knows I like my dad better, but I deny it everytime i bring it up. I raise my voice (not yell there is a difference) at a lot of  stuff she does , she isnt really street smart if you know. Like for corona, she hasnt a care, she goes out without a mask, walks in the house with her shoes on, not disinfecting anything. My dad has always said that even when they were married, she always cared about work more than family. She works constantly. She has high blood pressure because of how much she works. Shes always on her laptop. Anyway, maybe she was caring about work more this whole time. Everytime that I had a episode and made her cry a few times I felt horrible but felt nothing at the same time. Does that make sense?",3.0457220474692583,4.6214517992565085,4.064143742255268,88.03784558192741,74.37794299876084,7.3453360022876755,24.559126870651035,8.038279094779023,1.264631737679916,3130,98,657,48,65,1013,333,807,0.124,0.7909999999999999,0.085,-0.9828,6,2,1,0,3,0,113.0,2,4,4,11,38,31,5,2,47,1,51,6,5,9,1,115,112,47,0,12,18,11,7,6,1,2,0,6,11,1,41,30,0,2,33,3,9,17,23,15,0,1,47,14,126,17,87,62,24,99,0,3,1,1,84,44,3,18,43,444,167,14,0.0,0.0534645665903174,0.0,0.0,0.05423028447545149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04518517234904716,0.0,0.0,0.18042825044401167,0.15018714618142348,0.0,0.0,0.061371740844200676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07426642176388844,0.0,0.12655455871941376,0.0,0.04239548761092857,0.0,0.0,0.05501434862400257,0.0,0.07679440856417005,0.0,0.0,0.03990851500918509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840277197443404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048763018258763766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099133200147257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047144980538579566,0.0,0.0,0.07897664083119375,0.0,0.1586549915931024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04662515904619681,0.05032519299964487,0.05960795878370308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04055454562413337,0.0,0.08507779100159599,0.0,0.11408026247705033,0.09670979347426363,0.08665224140092855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034862693935010285,0.04171641503364338,0.023575429922077267,0.04328705685185248,0.02564501163547144,0.0,0.07217957709583088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0399030081473029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046310246883637884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049133807459185,0.04767598822477162,0.045263055691166745,0.0,0.0,0.2603352135904669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04010828851459434,0.0,0.046989706808746916,0.14879383664235993,0.03678208628102394,0.0,0.047779805364339456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13227185575751824,0.0,0.07969064535172715,0.0399333240051487,0.0,0.05048221875237946,0.0,0.07672562993758703,0.0,0.12809227230722695,0.06024124678309925,0.0,0.13599938276969348,0.0,0.05012259651114714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21139475475854247,0.03601754987680482,0.2397983778342216,0.03317133533557324,0.10037663269824096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04234582143114657,0.0,0.08659539862097931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030577193261689124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020973384327436,0.0,0.0,0.03128330307220533,0.0,0.047144980538579566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04317757816821032,0.0,0.0,0.05054921214377248,0.0,0.0,0.05136099601285104,0.08672277822980674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4600503062066318,0.0,0.1716930462569473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03595798935497371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045156592507640966,0.0,0.0,0.03473866321676524,0.04462879425965778,0.0,0.0,0.048096184847835496,0.0360360882757686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331237863799644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785527125154965,0.0362689655431594,0.03944036884636366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02997838352035603,0.08674092015165688,0.0,0.0,0.28943386886130257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05427862143084786,0.0,0.0,0.037232029473334885,0.05323061394316924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041830404241448634,0.0814347909268768,0.05037933954338319,0.0,0.043497930075713835,0.0,0.19710487616359726,0.0,0.0,0.03205479811964994,0.04933601522628808,0.0,0.029058379443766786
mentalhealth,zoryaaa,2020/04/11,Ted Bundy It wouldn't surprise me if I become a psychopath killer in future thanks to the mental issues I have,3.338181818181816,5.563379181818185,3.7181818181818183,87.99727272727276,75.36363636363637,4.4,20.090909090909093,3.1291,-0.2348909090909093,90,2,16,0,2,28,21,22,0.255,0.625,0.121,-0.4963,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5406848226706518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5109774794050013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4933652264026886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4507246292928104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,factoryresetneeded,2020/04/11,"I was so busy being a second parent that I never learned how to be a sibling Today out of nowhere I realised something for the first time. From a young age my parents always instilled the idea that as the eldest I am supposed to guide and be a role model for my younger siblings. I need to stop them from doing something wrong, and protect them from harm. Now, while I was given this ""task"" by my parents, I was never actually given the authority to act on this whenever I wanted to. Before I realised I would always start thinking of the way my siblings were acting and how it could be affecting them and their loved ones in the future. My brother never helps out at home?  I need to tell him off and explain the consequences that his behaviour will lead to. My sister is telling me how annoyed she is at xyz? I immediately start giving her advice/lecturing her like a parent would and giving life advice.

 
What's even more fucked up is that my parents tell me off for telling off my siblings. They always say that while the things I say might be correct, it's not my job to point these things out to my siblings and it's my parents job. Yet so many times when my siblings are struggling, sad or idk a PARENT should be speaking to them, I get told by my parents to do it instead cause ""after my parents I'm the next parental figure that my siblings have"". It's like my parents pick and chose whenever I should or shouldn't be acting as a second parent. Or perhaps I can no longer tell when I should or shouldn't. 

It doesn't help that my siblings have caught onto this fact and just straight up retaliate and tell me to fuck off, shut up, or start attacking me personally. I understand that they are reacting like this because I am the one that starts nagging or telling them off i.e. I am the one who starts it and shouldn't be surprised at the way they are reacting. 
It's like I never really learned how to just not give a fuck and spend time with my siblings? 
I always feel like I don't really fit in or get along with my siblings. I mean we have fun moments and are not at each other's throats all the time, but personality wise I'm a mismatch. Someone who doesn't fit in. Doesn't belong.

I realised how much all of this is affecting my mental health. I'm labelled as the angry one in my family. The one who just can't keep their mouth shut, and as a result of that all my points get dismissed, because everyone is so offended at me being angry or my tone, instead of actually listening to what I'm saying. Like I will complain about no one helping around the house when I have exams coming up and I know that everyone is just playing games and has no assignments to study for (my parents tell me to keep track of my siblings school workload  too ffs), and I get told off for being angry and raising my voice...
Strangely I don't have this problem with people outside my family. I can stay calm and composed and don't get angry as quickly.

I'm thinking of just not giving a fuck anymore at what my siblings do anymore. I know it will be difficult. One of my younger sibling suffers from depression and I am like a psychologist to them that they can vent to, and I guess a lot of the times my nagging does get heard and my other siblings end up acting on the things I ask them to do, but it just takes so much effort??? I know that if I keep things up the way they are my siblings will keep getting more and more hurtful towards me and eventually I will have enough and then cut off all contact with my family.
And I don't want it to get to that point. I will have to suck up a lot of things, but I think it will be good for me in the long run. I need to stop thinking about my family's future well being and focus on my own. 

I still don't know how I will be able to enforce this without seeming like I've actually abandoned my siblings and parents. It'll be a long way to go but hopefully I'll get there eventually. 

Just wanted to get this off my chest, since I don't have anyone I could possibly tell this.
Thank you to anyone who's still reading.",5.863700435845653,5.508473403422984,6.347662379079408,81.22574997342406,66.79951100244499,8.922334431806101,32.33028595726587,8.252601668568683,2.277909875624536,3196,119,646,37,46,1040,284,818,0.134,0.7929999999999999,0.073,-0.9947,16,0,2,0,0,0,68.0,1,1,14,3,34,40,11,1,35,0,80,10,3,14,10,136,147,63,0,19,25,16,1,8,0,18,2,7,1,2,51,41,0,8,17,3,1,9,25,22,1,10,10,8,112,18,98,102,14,96,0,5,0,5,74,43,5,15,47,486,163,9,0.0401502206890744,0.0,0.11754247096071868,0.0,0.0,0.03923433097617172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363279992171642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963646047485655,0.056147935689860894,0.0,0.0,0.03574220875438073,0.0375350364628926,0.04567667230787653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04895040374236913,0.0,0.034164880602916774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04124533653497856,0.0,0.03458585998013672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411336833406803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034581326246805086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03513572869257161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035561178313649584,0.041485910802327296,0.0,0.02651884209938389,0.0,0.0,0.07673051293663649,0.0,0.0,0.151400219150101,0.0,0.020301157959546057,0.028683325682668175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03415175720737693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484729282200497,0.2097683317079418,0.1540630008508426,0.02281829567979985,0.033676100199677435,0.0,0.0,0.04422999466492057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04267780708352326,0.0,0.0,0.08073553979267263,0.0,0.040273945000037184,0.03987822849514523,0.0,0.046327964003373856,0.04298164165426999,0.04532471205630606,0.0,0.0,0.07968579750644289,0.14274944375862195,0.0,0.0,0.08826204508692921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028359288255784324,0.15692295810158913,0.0,0.0,0.07106336371213594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826856368874405,0.036237141741164436,0.0,0.0,0.0407060219523978,0.0,0.04373536077092662,0.0,0.0,0.04046197902189831,0.04259303926434471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05903006390014364,0.08931263969804876,0.12386530151202595,0.0,0.042700215197153314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190447800443568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6241489606372299,0.0,0.0,0.027835107641558686,0.07011524807898725,0.0,0.0,0.11386480874815558,0.04526334114541865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03841833879369897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04016108590900321,0.0,0.05144251895715864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09578720101143152,0.0,0.04063416685532392,0.0,0.03655125297850308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033212677454934766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03401915169746193,0.0618192028975123,0.0,0.0,0.14209266427889314,0.042794793097704314,0.0641280362128984,0.0671347646078796,0.0,0.04197372821174408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030187969201567088,0.0,0.3158375631737683,0.036964928858227296,0.0,0.0,0.13337011284950193,0.10290656089081192,0.0,0.0,0.11705958281660547,0.0,0.038057714571161465,0.07673051293663649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041797795710909816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104492125629233,0.12747750537617866,0.0,0.0,0.03609987024713904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038703379980301225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05704312962282019,0.0438979634362663,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CoronavirusnCOVID_19,2020/04/11,"If you believe that viruses and germs exist you likely have a MENTAL ILLNESS!!!!!! BECAUSE VIRUSES DO ***NOT*** FUCKING EXIST! you CANNOT CATCH A VIRUS! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UXSJ-qmOKQg

ALL photos of ''viruses'' and ''germs'' are of ***EXOSOMES*** (made by the immune system) or CGI. NO real photos or evidence ov virus's exist! 

Enough with the pig's arse scientism propoganda. ''Germ theory'' has been disproven . look up ''23 reasons why germ theory is false'' on YouTube . 

***23 reasons to reject the germ theory of disease***

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QeCUhXd1MAU&feature=youtu.be

imagine being so gullible you believe everything the media tells you. have you ever seen a virus with your own eyes? no? yet you BELIEVE viruses exist?

That's how religion works . belief in viruses and other germs is no less a religion than believing in Judaism or Islam.  only those who believe in germs end up dying from germs because the stress causes their immune system to shut down. 

get a brain people!! look up ''viruses do not exist'' by virologist   ***Stefan Lanka.***

STRAIGHT FROM THE HORSES MOUTH !!!! 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Dxc1adZDnJ4


***VIRUS DONT EXIST & ALL STUDIES OF VIRUSES ARE MADE UP***
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3SNKejrFj70",5.580429864253394,7.446213598930483,3.859558823529412,73.7966685520362,118.89304812834223,4.860921431509667,23.91700946112711,6.297961479604792,1.9540844097079395,1001,38,118,16,52,286,111,187,0.09300000000000001,0.871,0.036000000000000004,-0.9036,0,0,0,0,0,0,98.0,0,8,1,1,4,4,1,1,11,0,13,7,3,6,3,23,20,9,1,1,6,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,4,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,4,4,9,1,22,15,5,17,2,1,4,1,11,11,1,4,4,81,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2689199905223062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15129782501970573,0.0,0.0,0.6990790422479849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13853426966382368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748270152768384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879400128761964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14544178477638808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991388267827816,0.12822627789524849,0.0,0.0,0.11225363229606948,0.0,0.0,0.11153116779640954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147264853637814,0.06483601751777446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06062795309459016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084219195996259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23484881897956175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250614694462148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09438202568337796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603384085496403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14125054975566434,0.0,0.2551865670825352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14215369604977848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084670122191776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11197902961987773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034473069364447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SamSepiol925,2020/04/11,"If you have bpd (borderline personality disorder), can you get psychosis from that specifically without having any other psychiatric issues? I'm just very curious. I've heard people telling me you can.",7.620000000000001,10.908698272727275,8.009090909090911,57.23363636363638,66.27272727272728,11.672727272727276,38.27272727272727,11.20814326018867,5.938745454545456,165,9,21,6,3,54,29,33,0.0,0.92,0.08,0.3804,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,4,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,14,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23545420331839176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4360755484509534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3968195709933874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18089544125147014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3613832690905359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2400383336276156,0.3023222961358113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026279032520418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28568320588544394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3337617714959803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BeautifulButterfly-,2020/04/11,"My Mother(Female 40)Has Been Dealing With Something And I Don’t Know What To Do. Me(Female 21). Hello 👋!! Sheesh hope everyone’s safe during this quarantine time. 
 
TL;DR Okay so I’m noticing some things about my mother that over the years maybe I didn’t quite pay attention to or maybe wasn’t the case at the time. 

Me and my husband recently decided to moved in/quarantine with my mother and brother since we all live in the same state and I wanted to be close with my family. My mother has been complaining that the neighbors downstairs have been talking bad about her and our family. We live in a 3 bedroom apartment. Okay so my husband is in the military and we live in an apartment complex not far from the base since my mother just retired recently so many members in the military live here. So my mother said the man and his wife downstairs discuss my brother being gay because they never see him with any girls(she claims they peek out the window when his friends come to pick him up to hangout) ,that my husband is gay, that I’m beautiful and the man doesn’t think I’m her daughter, that my mother looks like a man, that my husbands supervisor said they went into the bathroom stalls and my husband didn’t wash his hands, and that I have Coronavirus based off a convo about my immune system since I have lupus. Okay so she claims my husbands old supervisor knows the man downstairs and she said she heard him say he’s the one telling him all this stuff. Mind you me and my husband don’t know this man and have never seen him at all. Some of the stuff she was saying didn’t add up at all. She even says the man talks about us to the maintenance man and idk 😐 it’s just really odd. My mother likes to sleep on the couch so I’ve sat to try and see if I can hear the neighbors and I literally hear nothing at all. She claims she hears them as soon as she wakes up and she heard them so much so that she stopped sleeping in her room even though she hears them still sleeping on the couch. I’m honestly really concerned and confused and I’m wondering if this is actually her thoughts and no one downstairs is actually talking about her or us or maybe a mental health problem .Please give advice.

Backstory: my husbands old supervisor and my family had a situation this time last year because of my husband deciding to marry me so young and the fact that I stayed with him I’m the dorms for one night even though we were married and he needed help cleaning his dorm and at the time so we can move .me and my mom also had just gotten into a huge fight about me marrying young and her stress from the military at the time caused her to put her anger on me which resulted in a physical altercation. Which is why my husbands old supervisor was concerned since he knew about the fight and I’m not suppose to be in the dorms past a certain time. Which angered me and my mom because he made it seem like my husband wasn’t safe with me but that wasn’t true so we had a meeting. Btw me and my moms relationship HASN’T been the best over the years because of the fact that I felt she chose to stay with an abusive and cheating man for way to long and had put him before us. Plus some mother daughter issues.",4.280974226458152,5.68288281861199,4.672112893482787,85.59187831398083,70.97160883280758,7.730129538895229,28.15813141821599,8.197803283752503,1.7869354721793416,2553,93,509,37,47,806,259,634,0.055999999999999994,0.88,0.064,0.4547,0,2,1,0,2,0,39.0,10,1,6,2,31,24,5,2,41,3,37,10,5,4,11,103,75,55,0,6,11,27,2,3,3,0,3,12,11,8,25,51,0,3,13,1,1,6,15,10,0,3,30,18,92,14,64,42,11,69,0,0,4,2,116,32,0,12,29,339,117,4,0.0,0.07657253181103711,0.1261334313463778,0.0,0.0,0.06315284278298658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05168225921515634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04394863624446136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05396091930822698,0.15758429287773693,0.0,0.05499289218735237,0.0,0.06782214206298097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06638982210010994,0.0,0.05567051415166207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662769033682751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280567470544886,0.0,0.0,0.061753952464339235,0.0,0.0,0.1827740017365715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205213970977856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049930728155205585,0.0,0.0,0.061996192042355965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869557283148968,0.2913577021574551,0.0,0.043318175049489226,0.0,0.0,0.06418928096792176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06745388960679327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10655207286059593,0.05267970267882231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472059280222203,0.0,0.2282676121924204,0.05719293950581612,0.05427047747720402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06115171362715512,0.0,0.06552172397795819,0.1947797901965924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512890461698849,0.0,0.06525493613515694,0.2270713944172289,0.0,0.13737673443159598,0.047508346035255535,0.047920167134662114,0.09968878935908236,0.0,0.0,0.060648144470102174,0.0,0.062011434286977286,0.07357836844728709,0.203445773373192,0.0,0.13137896291187462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169386855042254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07094113587270924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061839395484926486,0.0,0.12993614785377053,0.0,0.06873886358011617,0.0,0.0,0.08280353535365012,0.0,0.12762290617781902,0.06938530688973896,0.0,0.0,0.18442548146399249,0.15418216382410505,0.0,0.0,0.10299884425672336,0.058834074022429225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21384078132871973,0.07264355508941522,0.19402128382140044,0.0,0.0,0.049753090016078055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13776775457550908,0.051611276249293736,0.05403113968133125,0.07403011136823498,0.0,0.14796510856153802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15583441678791854,0.05648692378391335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04293536583483048,0.04141042869586738,0.12699157237495107,0.05130668924478636,0.2261074496521593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043877550765311725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23321528993328916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03811873114690637,0.051297974599582866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05990995838404404,0.058315895147485676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700853205231834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485317807128657
mentalhealth,dtucker00,2020/04/11,"[BPD] For a long time after going off of medication, I felt really well. Over time I have become less driven and focused, and I have almost no motivation. I don't know whats been happening, and I keep beating myself up for being lazy all of the time. I used to write music for ages, I looked forward to playing bass, I used to enjoy video games. I wish I had the willpower but I feel so defeated all of the time, and I always end up thinking about all the wrongs myself and others have done, just random shit every time. I don't know, I'm stressing, I don't want to only work and sleep. Sorry for the rant",2.6224193548387085,4.0996570483870975,4.376645161290323,85.76996774193552,75.29032258064517,6.572903225806452,21.27096774193549,7.1686216300943375,0.5974735483870971,470,11,96,5,10,159,77,124,0.174,0.721,0.105,-0.8893,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,5,4,7,1,1,6,0,10,3,2,3,3,25,25,8,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,6,3,0,3,4,4,1,0,5,3,16,3,17,19,4,16,0,1,1,0,2,5,1,2,10,66,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679820028868853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958526830734194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18527177929699695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112810500566112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716712021095787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14858078612867096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14134048829536852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482176778135322,0.0,0.16107072639585507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09533880683924874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483448414895112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14910799907989486,0.0,0.0,0.184387085386686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14845754480025286,0.14087161651454905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16899511392825767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758493495766654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746789433802176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721976893677845,0.0,0.0,0.16787575345256836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18778754388142088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19216233104961866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074903760225374,0.0,0.0,0.4890952905266798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897722311893752,0.0,0.0,0.0989460112711144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15083153469085558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19290951460502684,0.0,0.0,0.12212734899317315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341332391408935,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,123592817496,2020/04/11,"Lost of interest in everything Lately I been going through a lot and seen a lot and it’s been hard on me. I’ve become so focused on death that I wonder if I should cling onto it or let it go, and I ask myself many questions. It’s made me very depressed and I’ve lost interest in everything if that’s even possible. My friends wanna go out skateboarding or go get a bite to eat and I just have no motivation to go, I don’t wanna even get ready in the mornings sometimes as I just think that all of these things are almost pointless when thinking about the bigger picture? I need some help on what it is and if it stays like this forever? I liked having interests but it’s like I can’t even leave my room to go do them anymore.",2.202601214574898,3.8728791184210536,3.7976315789473714,88.66072874493929,76.89473684210526,7.045344129554657,24.8502024291498,7.882392219407189,1.2861380566801612,574,20,123,9,13,191,92,152,0.083,0.7659999999999999,0.151,0.8408,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,3,8,10,0,0,5,0,11,1,0,2,1,30,28,15,1,7,8,0,1,3,1,1,0,0,1,0,14,7,1,0,5,0,0,6,3,3,0,0,6,2,16,7,18,20,4,19,0,3,1,0,5,10,0,11,5,88,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13900637030416246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13767034813417214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297762734873628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15331379027080336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11956390816345147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14204566974940838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750643262270552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24952168569803895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072505933029358,0.0,0.1450535550252122,0.0,0.4733614765902386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12435383627886115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304691011949093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15659297074604764,0.14698842501319428,0.0,0.14195100987182135,0.0,0.20345867467556608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030729170182649,0.2360365308454834,0.0,0.13135313283669467,0.0,0.14073986161434693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293193282486778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564966573363219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1555081487254541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729474468225833,0.0,0.0,0.14796172579646366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09222464060909323,0.17789818857659348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11453954930538217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15054241116958714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cdionisio10,2020/04/11,"A year’s journey Even though 2020 hasn’t been the best due to the outbreak and quarantine, I feel that I have improved so much in the past year. 2019 was a really hard year for me and it’s taken me a very long time to get where I am today. In 2019, my mental illness has been worse than it’s ever been, a long term relationship ended, I didn’t know what to do with my life, I went on dates through bumble, and even got physically/verbally abused by my most recent ex. Some of things that have got me to where I am today are the friends and family that support me, my job where I get to see my students every day, and finally learning how to take care  and be content with myself. I’ve had such a rocky relationship with myself in the past, and it makes me so happy to know that I’m on the road to getting better. 

What have y’all been doing to keep yourselves busy? I’ve been journaling and working out a lot more. I also have a lot of indoor plants that I take care of and a vegetable/fruit garden in the backyard. :) 

Also, do you guys have any recommendations for self-help books? I’ve been reading atomic habits and I’m loving it so far. I also ordered you are a badass and inquire within!",5.2564489795918385,4.8999268693877545,6.069285714285716,82.71821428571431,68.06122448979592,8.63265306122449,28.112244897959183,7.957251820313856,1.5878571428571426,933,26,197,10,14,308,133,245,0.051,0.8079999999999999,0.142,0.9758,1,1,0,0,1,0,26.0,0,3,0,3,15,8,0,0,16,0,24,3,0,2,1,28,45,19,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,0,2,1,12,15,0,1,5,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,13,3,25,8,28,31,8,34,0,0,1,1,9,13,0,4,18,138,37,6,0.0,0.14174035407943272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870008950020925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135156452669698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255428572501096,0.10580179376616672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24393870389774505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715056392226012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595545055855267,0.0,0.0,0.15802715186480942,0.1082109365709331,0.10079227274065283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11277521721317113,0.0,0.06048782522030258,0.0,0.0,0.1310473069151503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242477584034434,0.0,0.18750305096470699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913558730076679,0.0,0.0,0.11845114278444566,0.0,0.12734689154982234,0.1071637469687173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018454299958833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187129473529282,0.10633141495639116,0.0,0.0,0.13148952309624848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08449723285766793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117351302005527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20340795124467773,0.10796950107430707,0.0,0.07985303345533287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055751302566885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794080108756076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283981100284434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11966099421334005,0.0,0.07663715788462078,0.0,0.11811883114254625,0.2568727384052393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953285225748276,0.0,0.12479874174574784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13575314145832726,0.0,0.0,0.17989167006718834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947594015797797,0.0,0.11753451275418705,0.0,0.06975641093854823,0.0,0.22678788981907436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870614085557916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108969301837098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870910608649437,0.0,0.121911784967735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2311107292552109
mentalhealth,RAThrow214454,2020/04/11,"Need advice on what to do about a friend. Hi guys, throwaway account here because I don't know if my friend is maybe on this, i have never posted here or even been on this subreddit, but i didn't know where else to go for this sort of thing, any help would be appreciated 

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My friend has recently been going through some tough times and is starting to describe things that are genuinely starting to scare me. About 5 minutes ago he said he saw his ex standing across the room and i know that's not true, he also believes he is immortal and at first i thought he was joking but at this point i don't know and its starting to scare me. He says he hears conversations in his head and can't get them to stop. I'm just really worried about him and don't know what to do. 

​

We are located in America, and if there are any services i can reach out to that would be great... thanks!",6.017500000000003,5.584874638888892,5.917777777777778,84.69500000000002,66.5,9.2,31.333333333333336,8.548686976883017,2.0882666666666667,705,24,151,9,10,221,110,180,0.099,0.764,0.13699999999999998,0.7395,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,1,1,10,10,0,2,2,0,23,1,1,0,2,30,41,13,0,5,7,1,0,0,3,2,0,3,1,1,12,9,0,1,6,1,1,2,7,3,0,1,7,4,16,7,23,30,1,25,0,0,1,0,23,12,0,5,9,99,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989287990901233,0.108758762631525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09811648414310943,0.0,0.265872746292394,0.2981676165580425,0.16686908570461315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07479170322728129,0.0,0.0,0.13823149738844812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249314680388133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08103669087867099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436147179449916,0.0,0.0,0.2843738395935359,0.0,0.06410133364437481,0.0,0.13945700694262325,0.0,0.0,0.13526799927520014,0.0,0.12148404282145375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259170499309341,0.0,0.13828242900864388,0.0,0.08223764014761234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371406657398409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326027336035147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097431865796593,0.09462737957794007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598328556858635,0.0,0.11750470471563765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07859942547884262,0.0,0.12114322245631776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11670787424569184,0.09756934043859627,0.24567153073813294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605253864737095,0.0,0.0,0.10257572985940204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11295800555733256,0.0,0.0,0.16302178755669955,0.0,0.0,0.09740348115906752,0.07154249941641183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245993464440542,0.0,0.1743132842932021,0.0,0.2981676165580425,0.0
mentalhealth,swagperson5442,2020/04/11,"things i did to help myself get better i have suffered with anxiety and depressive episodes for quite a while. i’ve had bad social anxiety most of my life, and i started going to therapy for general anxiety management when i was 13 (i’m 17 now). anyways, the therapy has helped me a ton, my anxiety is no longer debilitating, and it has helped with navigating depression. if you are struggling with your mental health, there is no shame in seeking professional help. 

that being said, i wanted to share a few things i have done to help maintain my mental health and better myself as a person, in hopes that i can help others. this is by no means a “cure” for mental illness, it’s just a few things you can do to help yourself. 

- i used the energy i was using to bring myself down to pick myself up. whenever i thought negatively about myself, i turned that into thinking about something i could make better about myself. 
- every time i had a panic attack i accepted that it was happening and that is okay, instead of getting mad at myself for letting it happen. 
- i accepted my feelings as truths and stopped getting mad at myself for feeling them.
- i let go of my anger. the people i was angry at couldn’t feel it, so it wasn’t hurting anyone but me.
- i stopped canceling plans & isolating myself. no matter how much i didn’t want to, i still went out. eventually i found that i really enjoy it and started going out of my way to be with other people. 
- i stopped taking on other people’s problems. i used to use other people’s problems to distract myself from my own, so i focused on myself for a while. 
- i spent more time doing things i enjoy. doing things instead of sitting in bed all day was really hard, but after some time of self improvement, it was easier for me to get up and be productive. 
- spending time outside. being outside has always made me feel good, so i try and spend at least 30 min a day outside. 



this is all a process and it takes time. i gradually started doing this over the span of about 2 years, and i am still not completely where i’d like to be. it’s not a smooth process, there will be times when it feels like you are getting worse, but you need to keep fighting. getting to a point where you’re happy about yourself is a feeling beyond words. it’s a constant battle, but it’s worth it. this is the best i’ve felt in years and i hope others can feel this way too :)


note: please don’t discredit these things because of my age. many people have told me that my mental issues are not real bc i’m “too young”. they are very real and they affect me greatly. it hurst to hear people invalidate me when they don’t know what i’ve been through. i don’t want to talk about what has happened to me bc it could potentially be triggering to some people, and frankly it’s no body’s business but mine. thank you :))",4.1434908262906704,5.4668272226211885,5.2156535446862575,81.86596137846479,71.20825852782765,7.8039847615711375,27.409423304286904,8.25429008570747,1.846670657266716,2221,77,424,33,41,732,246,557,0.125,0.716,0.159,0.9774,0,0,1,0,2,0,70.0,0,6,4,6,27,36,6,4,19,1,55,5,1,10,3,82,108,31,0,12,10,0,10,2,0,1,4,2,1,2,43,21,0,4,15,0,4,5,15,17,0,0,21,12,71,19,68,74,13,59,0,4,0,0,26,22,0,6,31,320,114,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052099665977613584,0.06784198511011838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19159742659788226,0.0,0.0,0.04378099832508108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07123219364118262,0.0,0.0,0.052279876001512834,0.03816876823565399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0657092803952479,0.16613035305666912,0.0,0.06954977446623763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564933831858052,0.06766323291802721,0.0,0.09998398826819248,0.0,0.0,0.08076139333549955,0.0,0.10785828315065572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407561769477935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05275479510551029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22161579626843306,0.044731284177823065,0.060119030795703576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06865275834989261,0.0,0.0,0.1962786385570117,0.0,0.1067545318627543,0.05251745298638221,0.0,0.06903189379637563,0.0,0.0,0.16610742920424035,0.06665351408754239,0.05608963227389581,0.0,0.0,0.13311100238930226,0.07057026055222868,0.0,0.2937807944086849,0.0,0.0,0.12437918748050625,0.0,0.0,0.06702932737078839,0.0,0.0,0.06535250009955322,0.0,0.05565398871138773,0.0,0.0,0.03441088617632713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12805362798400566,0.044225951902669536,0.06117984286867612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05924665566659965,0.04179517242684866,0.06348052718313774,0.0,0.06820474281495349,0.0,0.0,0.25239978125957485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04602831959872577,0.04642731124467609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346375897303821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3038594919804027,0.054671921968150114,0.0,0.0687311082609051,0.059190243771079926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119825828373816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665974433075584,0.0,0.142536338406199,0.08022395867736287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05956002619465401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531980945764491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382684535643599,0.0,0.048203133120752834,0.0,0.0,0.1329550293245898,0.0,0.10000686263999672,0.15704372640273487,0.0,0.0654574990854959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09415551348863364,0.05032657023443474,0.0,0.0576463397467712,0.14320858768252445,0.0,0.24958680808638156,0.040120370541192135,0.0,0.04970833310759836,0.21906352935375145,0.0,0.0,0.0598301329708212,0.0,0.042510634412243,0.06810579320505109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21631274757896765,0.0,0.051662911202432604,0.1107936575160296,0.09939977989908216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058043584796675124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380877285571794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064241988017798
mentalhealth,dasein-t,2020/04/11,"I sometimes want to die. Is it okay? So, I have had suicidal thoughts since I was 13. Usual stuff. Fighting parents. Top achiever etc. etc. Since the last 6 monts, my suicidal thoughts are more or less gone because I’ve met the love of my life. He isn’t best at dealing with my stuff because he cares a lot and doesn’t know what to do. I’m in love with him, with all my body and soul. His presence prolly prevented a suicide attempt. To make it clear, I am not depended on him. It’s not like I can’t survive without him. It’s not something unhealthy like that. The thing is, I was never loved and cared for that deeply. I gradually stop hurting myself and having suicidal thoughts. I started to love myself more and more because it’s easier for me to love myself when there’s someone who loves me a lot. I also had a lot of positive updates in my life, in my career etc. But this quarantine hit hard. I am stuck with my problematic family who loves me a lot. They fight all the time. I believe that they also need help because they aren’t mentally healthy either, just like me. So with this period, I sometimes have suicidal thoughts again. I am sure that I won’t do anything and I won’t take my thoughts to action because hurting my boyfriend is worse than having to deal with breakdowns and horrific thoughts. I am sure I’ll never do that to him. But having suicidal thoughts making me feel guilty. Even thinking about a such action fills my heart with regret because I think about my loved ones, starting with my boyfriend, and how they would feel if I do that. Should I forgive myself of having this kind of thoughts? What do you think I should do considering the physical conditions we are in rn? Thanks in advance",3.0256048387096786,5.233814982142857,3.703168202764978,87.81763824884796,76.26190476190476,6.7164362519201255,28.100614439324122,7.717688229018142,1.7391370199692782,1358,58,266,20,31,429,161,336,0.205,0.632,0.16399999999999998,-0.9588,2,1,1,0,3,3,39.0,1,1,4,6,13,25,2,0,11,1,34,12,2,4,7,65,71,18,7,7,10,1,3,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,21,17,0,2,15,0,0,5,12,5,0,1,15,3,52,20,33,50,15,25,1,3,0,8,31,8,0,7,15,195,73,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103114513545696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05305395589463947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358047221999887,0.0,0.0,0.07263648781540644,0.06765810253511975,0.0,0.0,0.07161249893206058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146450703855905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329330795922416,0.0,0.0,0.06691048751184753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21570587404473207,0.04258233992118608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06077731044808182,0.0,0.0651967235814694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05775315250323231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07639818071306761,0.04321340258482232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13803459958270636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713639282256356,0.03543145277559074,0.0525522877477622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107523231255746,0.09449149474000536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2192429951527016,0.4654991440762234,0.0,0.08606948803941677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497137914759872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047804263959788915,0.09944767485809336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04368706675663014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158716783793886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666178529051262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05462587981718002,0.049632753601632516,0.12752649318748344,0.0,0.09126549504620156,0.0,0.0,0.05390045606719681,0.0,0.0,0.14760722947057936,0.4231233935712333,0.0,0.12152588797395295,0.0,0.04847400053342794,0.0,0.0,0.05935602919254403,0.0,0.0,0.04283151926015942,0.1239308113326692,0.0,0.4094607614649212,0.037593428309185016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710054520876367,0.0,0.038026534432532455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621475280196455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06570122927148278,0.045798189956107516,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jim_bo1,2020/04/11,I’m just disappointed in myself. I feel so alone. I have nobody to talk to. My boyfriend isn’t talking to me. Can’t talk to my parents about anything. And I feel like if I ended it all tonight nobody would even notice. Nobody would care. I’m just overwhelmed with these negative thoughts. I hate it. I was doing so well before this all happened. I was genuinely happy with life and how things were going. But now I’m back where I was 2 years ago. I hate myself. I’m so disappointed. I’m scared. I need help.,-0.10290048543689068,2.2091427572815583,1.6992657766990291,94.34559769417477,97.15533980582524,4.1283980582524284,18.08798543689321,5.985473137389443,-0.17117427184466028,396,12,83,4,16,129,63,103,0.20800000000000002,0.648,0.14400000000000002,-0.8418,1,1,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,0,12,10,2,2,0,0,10,1,0,1,2,17,24,8,0,4,4,1,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,6,1,0,5,2,15,4,8,17,2,9,0,3,0,0,5,2,0,1,7,56,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410740928610448,0.0,0.0,0.19173982259919434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234699049791314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14235426639606932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575327954942247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18875333296908625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639710642026816,0.0,0.0,0.12227724070633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872155329507628,0.13225758144391828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521418027568856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16371067997276886,0.1970753294922621,0.0,0.3655569534808041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408936754964214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076345880098972,0.09044562658612056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372722471761535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107728036910008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20556600152564555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18534836857871886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.446403713905029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299277118368472,0.0,0.0,0.14697328805236998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16645494954620418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26302341804335483,0.0,0.0,0.11921825643030705
mentalhealth,wookieewookieeson,2020/04/11,"How do I deal with having zero appetite? On good days I am disinterested in food, on bad days it's straight up repulsive. It's near impossible to eat enough. I already weigh practically nothking, I don't want to get even weaker or even die. But I don't have any appetite even if hungry.

I take antidepressants for depressive tendencies, OCD, and GAD (with that my anxiety levels are low nowadays). I'm also diagnosed with anorexia nervosa, though I don't have a distorted body image or a desire to lose weight. I just want to be a healthy weight but I'm failing. The medication helps my mood and the intrusive thoughts, and getting myself to eat is easier when I function and don't want to die, but my appetite is still on horrible levels.",4.1201063829787214,6.243060390070927,5.395336879432627,77.30875,72.75886524822695,8.67163120567376,30.89893617021277,9.2995712137729,3.0361957446808514,589,27,106,14,12,196,88,141,0.21100000000000002,0.682,0.107,-0.9257,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,0,0,2,9,7,0,0,5,0,13,9,1,1,0,20,22,14,2,5,7,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,7,6,0,1,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,2,13,1,16,20,1,14,0,4,0,0,2,10,0,3,4,71,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17306200291283474,0.12541413917868988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106647435045953,0.0,0.1199718851353653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13094362257189032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17419894831815555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022803077612046,0.1616812917227705,0.13507448181134601,0.15917565190453795,0.3255224082342615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209454346158946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620437534437765,0.0,0.31074738105009403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896352925168243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16387080416557792,0.0,0.0,0.1315386735440388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10511753389120992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1754488000931041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15798625492655885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12524188920945098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791405187113875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15408129379609398,0.12450276678029627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775010956934643,0.0,0.0,0.3819449887465233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lentilsoupgrows,2020/04/11,"so uh... i was diagnosed with ODD and my therapist talked to me about possibilities of me becoming a sociopath out of the blue i'm only 16, and i haven't had the best childhood in the world, and i am aware of being compulsive and more of a sneakier person if that makes sense, but not a bad person. i just sneak around things to make things easier and i make sure to keep people safe because i'm not about hurting people. it did come as a little surprise to me to be diagnosed with this, though. sure i have all of the symptoms except the physical violence piece, i still just never see myself as someone who doesn't care about others. i've been in a good relationship for almost two years as well, with him seemingly content, and if i feel like i'm becoming more compulsive or controlling, i'll stop and think, explain to him how i'm feeling this and what i would like, and he actually appreciates it and thinks it's good i'm trying to be nice. so sometimes i do have a hard time seeing consequences, but i still aim to be nice and make sure the relationships i have in my life are as healthy as possible because i genuinely don't want people to get hurt, it makes me sad to think. maybe i'm just missing information? like i don't know everything about the diagnostic? i guess i just don't exactly feel like i have the potential for becoming a sociopath because even though i'm a lil... different... i still try my best to stay knowledgeable about the effects i have on people. now i don't really care about myself like whatsoever, which has in the past i've been told hurts my friends or family, and that was a little weird, but i try to get it and work with it. i guess it just came as a shock when my therapist spoke to me about it, saying she even informed my psychiatrist about her suspicions, and she's been suspicious for a long time apparently. it just seems a little weird and it shows how little i actually know about myself and perhaps the impact i have on people and that frightens me lol. i genuinely want my boyfriend to be happy, along with my friends and family. my question is, does it seem like i contain sociopathic traits for the more knowledgeable on this topic? i'm anxious to speak about it with the professionals working with me because in all honesty, i really don't like the idea not knowing if i'm hurting people or not. now the things i do know is that sociopaths/ people with odd still experience anxiety, if not being more susceptible to it, which makes sense considering i have generalized anxiety along with ptsd, and i also know that i sociopaths/ odd still have emotions. everything else is confusing lol, i just learned odd was a thing today.",9.728287118287117,7.143061196911197,9.584233064233064,68.2853983853984,60.58301158301158,13.510845910845909,39.375570375570376,11.995994275388036,4.538132046332047,2132,82,405,53,22,702,209,518,0.136,0.684,0.18,0.9855,2,0,0,0,0,0,52.0,0,0,0,6,36,35,0,1,28,2,38,4,0,10,7,108,84,43,0,7,23,0,4,7,2,1,4,3,0,2,30,34,0,5,23,1,0,2,13,11,2,1,11,10,56,24,63,66,9,35,0,6,3,0,22,15,0,15,24,285,86,4,0.0,0.0,0.12006207956345905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061599693379374064,0.0,0.0,0.04919456683033944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411960979366807,0.06949591465516164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054762553605109066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05136354508195808,0.1499990740558063,0.2038197771263225,0.0,0.0,0.12911513354724388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07035826471365403,0.12543994545365275,0.0,0.0,0.052990849674585234,0.0,0.0,0.06899576682084907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12487550919954322,0.0,0.06427144557775044,0.0,0.0,0.05383333299864107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051388979172358885,0.06919756318225548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08126187846938478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057377656053716,0.0601747502787115,0.11598419496132115,0.0,0.09331347639805562,0.08789452107250627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09505468918813953,0.0,0.06427946067212488,0.0,0.0,0.10319391591432232,0.0,0.0,0.1355342905882688,0.0,0.0,0.06548525049308347,0.05510652618700418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2634179069685008,0.06944442047990046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054678518328647716,0.0,0.0,0.16903876200631784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043450785428020965,0.21037631497452264,0.2466219938273949,0.0,0.05443999406119849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24637566735152905,0.0,0.06180139665937636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0474451667248596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046785921933028836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058724273774314675,0.2985336215117393,0.10742732934741897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13870078163641875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190926851098997,0.0,0.06891234019362945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881784031122475,0.0,0.0,0.13209097932893255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04892023476705217,0.0,0.0,0.09804106097879632,0.16800640086272067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05212256554246278,0.0,0.06084119854738278,0.0,0.0,0.06556819605462541,0.2456350029199581,0.05143038544246067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17393516815365448,0.06393899499870474,0.0,0.0494444757095812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428503427938851,0.16347479820133098,0.11825149284618157,0.1208789145242578,0.0,0.07174130421584947,0.0,0.058310264164514715,0.05878146558758851,0.0,0.12529659904124665,0.0,0.060092491251623574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256782096492778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531054594672002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956920529493949,0.0,0.0,0.04369941803596575,0.0,0.0,0.03961448348609179
mentalhealth,JanaeNay,2020/04/11,"I need a mental health break from work. Can anyone relate? To be quite honest I hate my fucking job. I’m a registrar in the ER and I feel like I don’t matter even with all of this Corona shit going on. Everyone glorifies the doctors and nurses so much that I barely think of myself as a “healthcare hero.” Also, everything I do could easily be self-service on an iPad so I don’t see this position lasting much longer in the future. Working at this place as a registrar made me so introverted and angry.. more than I’ve ever been in my life. My compassion runs thin for these patients and I am unable to truly make friends (besides the occasional hello and short conversation) because all I can think about is getting the fuck out of there. This job is high school degree level yet there I am with an associates and bachelors degree working for $15/hour with no benefits and no weekends off. I feel like I have way more potential but I’m stuck and it’s ruining my mental health. 

Even though I don’t have symptoms, part of me just wants to fake it so I can get the time off to myself. 

Can anyone relate? Has anyone gone on disability due to their mental health and if so how did that go? I am already trying to cut some of my work hours but sometimes it’s just not enough. I need a real break.. I can’t afford to quit until I find another job because I don’t want gaps in my resume.",3.002529219261337,4.68941265949821,4.620439457690512,83.54196353436188,74.73476702508961,7.4328190743338025,24.316814710924106,8.18289091462,1.4739972261181236,1088,34,214,18,23,366,158,279,0.083,0.8320000000000001,0.086,-0.6578,4,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,7,17,13,5,0,13,0,23,9,1,3,3,38,45,23,0,6,6,0,3,2,1,0,6,0,0,0,10,13,0,0,5,1,0,4,8,7,1,0,5,4,30,6,34,37,9,32,0,1,1,2,4,16,3,2,11,150,40,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11263038278446025,0.08162070393576748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702321293403867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21409698543760716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443477809624355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148995873089364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446703362075384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054596021715735,0.0,0.13482488313574215,0.09232291226552287,0.0,0.0975267170494966,0.09172872190167668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321345250136807,0.1458293698728277,0.0,0.0,0.09328482983174306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885454780696156,0.1887134166818949,0.10664866400316897,0.0,0.11601087396109575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10076726717050444,0.0,0.325468415869831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783643110663364,0.0,0.0,0.2010253556388356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30384890946937826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08319594539921868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209096291930066,0.09972682540244307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965756139325878,0.06812864610038731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085701237986008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15005786144443242,0.15135862222925925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105255826118482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10663536583454787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171156802490721,0.0,0.11617140439744765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10329441943686103,0.08133195317377741,0.0,0.10647522006694501,0.0,0.10476743468858893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10094410366208548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10608378357589836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307972364895147,0.10027755837842504,0.0,0.05951445584999445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929489218984954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040021920854226,0.08101381133255879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29721581297191346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,faintlygold,2020/04/11,"How do you cope with/get over being groomed? Okay, so when I was 15 I got into a very very bad “friendship”. I don’t even really want to discuss what it was like, but for an idea of it, our friendship ended when this person posted a ton of hateful tweets about me from their vore/cannibalism fetish account that, up until the tweets went up, I didn’t even know existed. Last night I just freaked the fuck out and went on Twitter -even though it’s been nearly a year since we more or less “broke up”- and discovered no less than 6 accounts tied to this person, all of which heavily featured gore, vore, cannibalism & some graphic descriptions of killing and eating people. I also discovered that since me and their other victim got away, they have found another person but I don’t know anything about that situation. Idk. I feel disgusting, I hate myself, I’m honestly mildly suicidal and I feel like everyone around me will do the exact same thing this person did to me if I give them the chance. I feel like this person will come back somehow and I’ll be trapped again. Idk. How do you get over feeling so completely and utterly used? It’s gross but since this person’s obsession is vore I feel like they just completely consumed me and then spat me out, like I can’t stop feeling just...eaten alive. It’s gross.",3.939745031871016,5.874282070866144,4.3649381327334105,85.31108923884516,72.77952755905511,7.6727409073865775,25.874765654293213,8.418075326091056,1.7181112110986128,1042,35,201,18,21,328,149,254,0.231,0.642,0.127,-0.9898,0,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,2,2,5,0,19,19,6,1,8,1,17,3,1,3,2,41,39,23,2,2,7,0,6,5,0,2,0,0,0,6,17,14,1,1,10,0,2,3,5,12,0,0,10,6,30,7,25,25,7,27,0,1,0,1,17,12,1,4,16,135,47,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793555397590406,0.0,0.10751748533140393,0.0,0.0,0.10405307011087488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165921869971676,0.08833723477846994,0.0,0.0,0.09323143117648668,0.07630303778553207,0.08285430905355275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547930694703257,0.20808505995888416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1015387832820679,0.0,0.0,0.08788981619125245,0.0,0.0,0.1966247690525836,0.0,0.0,0.09482012405186516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010471181461201,0.21267339904503976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10880241677574516,0.0,0.09173809045036932,0.1036889157830866,0.09519207088152082,0.0,0.0,0.15872928119414262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19594148275544745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120204897715988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10978515306526114,0.0,0.10907027392251396,0.08088706461186916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24239793571537935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312221084944056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06879475344441273,0.5198716598910542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09503652060478934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06357035607316021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462564168420544,0.11154056753087138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0829621289456084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854335349097807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592511980543722,0.0,0.09749462314244373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570431211242881,0.0,0.1637530590642081,0.058529416690155364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839775256230773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639019493790047
mentalhealth,judyz15,2020/04/11,"My Journey- Panic disorder and Anxiety I am not the same person I was in the past.

I guess every new year offers a new perspective.

I went from going through the most traumatic experience in my life

at the end of 2018, to being here and ever so present.

I don't want to go into too much detail, but that event gave me a lot of insight into who I am and who I want to be. 

I went through panic attacks almost *every* day. I couldn't think, I'd disassociate from reality. I'd feel faint. I'd be scared of the next time the panic attack would happen. I wondered when it would stop. 

That's not to say that I didn't have support though. I am so grateful for everyone who was there for me during that difficult time.

I realize my anxiety will probably be a lifelong struggle that I have to work through. But I'm so glad to say that I am feeling better now that I did during the peak of my anxiety battle. I have medications that I take if I am feeling super anxious. 

If someone had told me a year ago that it does get better, I honestly wouldn't have believed them.

But it does get better, and every little accomplishment is something to be proud of.",3.624477687626776,4.790240991379314,5.4487322515213,80.30478701825561,72.27586206896551,8.217444219066937,28.30223123732252,8.671277953709913,2.147262373225152,898,34,177,16,17,309,121,232,0.204,0.647,0.149,-0.8077,0,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,7,10,17,3,5,11,0,26,3,0,0,1,33,46,14,0,8,7,0,3,0,0,4,3,2,0,1,15,6,0,1,7,0,0,5,6,9,0,0,9,5,28,8,24,27,4,28,0,0,0,0,10,6,0,7,17,129,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09376758541237104,0.0,0.1059233876394098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427642257384074,0.11950128813204212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24068003617805225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917783380788638,0.0,0.28066143509046004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821934744734624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123304152098904,0.0,0.18513757735832526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368968064676034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09568406378693096,0.2673726305240278,0.10107732074412534,0.0,0.10347313517652787,0.0,0.0,0.16045663525659254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11053136560425628,0.0,0.12023442059698145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11652859302397628,0.0,0.09354090247382718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0747155405430989,0.0,0.1060193469296159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08993037117328062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10656221889342997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776046938860176,0.0,0.0,0.2043259615467715,0.1124982274232933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3723301065906848,0.0,0.0,0.1009789769005952,0.0,0.09236301372031956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404872837351347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16824099947148322,0.10590423099939976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962704863987962,0.08143461004330826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843681445158155,0.0,0.11058422072034632,0.0,0.0,0.12003788764974035,0.0,0.0,0.07953339366101543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777955120947099,0.10392831050090326,0.0,0.123362334442345,0.0,0.0,0.10107732074412534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12478356641932754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19611823495340105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471389505096735,0.07700909803705712,0.0,0.0,0.1502861505408114,0.0,0.0,0.13623770055444187
mentalhealth,itsnotbundy,2020/04/12,"Why am I like this? Today me and my boyfriend were arguing and I got annoyed at him (on facetime) and he chucked his phone and I was like laughing telling him to smash it harder and harder then he picked up a glass photo frame and smashed his head with it (he is okay), I do love him with all my heart and I hate him hurting but I also love him hurting and i feel nothing, it's like there is 2 sides of me and I don't know which is the real me?
I've killed animals in the past (mainly because they were annoying me or I was bored or I wanted to play like to have fun).
Me and my boyfriend have rough sex, I tell him to hurt me and I hurt him too.
I have constant thoughts of killing people and really hurting them. 
I lack empathy.
I get excited when imagining killing someone (I think sexually too)
5 years ago (when I was 13) I was raped and I guess that's where I started go change.
What do any of you think?",0.3623660714285748,2.461292468750002,2.0496726190476195,96.65187500000002,85.25,5.3238095238095235,22.684523809523807,6.655083550727371,0.4231648809523807,702,26,164,8,21,229,110,192,0.26,0.623,0.11699999999999999,-0.9895,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,2,0,7,25,8,0,3,1,16,6,2,1,1,30,30,20,3,2,3,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,15,0,0,6,1,0,1,1,14,0,0,8,2,41,11,13,22,3,16,0,5,0,4,21,6,0,3,13,107,48,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10537174515697367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950608936022336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083618435884529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07246250418480497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12574948885648066,0.0,0.0,0.12845704813444764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06010462145899331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06210505921147125,0.0,0.06755698502059336,0.0,0.09507179559846922,0.0,0.1309495296655378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736025298950516,0.12199568085555255,0.0,0.0,0.14086240779191014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6362679671927843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3945386088859448,0.0,0.06532825393159374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322969707864975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21457098077348052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11405968791603292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347557872357925,0.08241000889703072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13530093445087832,0.07615164452634614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071879836640313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413732670423164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077965450150193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233515005188894,0.0,0.09437009529860478,0.0,0.0,0.11267556916961312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07011304654316576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726236020093413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076548863876902
mentalhealth,alexrobb51,2020/04/12,"Just launched a website for OCD/Tourette's/Mental Health in general! Hello! I just launched a website called \[[TicsAndThoughts.com](https://TicsAndThoughts.com)\]([https://ticsandthoughts.com](https://ticsandthoughts.com)) - basically my thought is to have a place with posts relating to OCD, Tourette's, and Mental Health in general. Currently have it set up to 3 different categories of posts: General info, Resources, and Research Reviews. Hoping to eventually get user-submitted ideas and have it be an educational forum for anybody that's interested in the above topics!

​

It's very basic right now as I'm completely new to creating a website but I have a ton of ideas for it and thought some of my fellow mental health friends might enjoy it/have some ideas. I'd really appreciate it if anybody had a second to check it out and, if they have any, provide feedback/suggestions/ideas! Thanks guys!

​

\*I have it on my site as well but brief disclaimer: I am by no means a medical professional - just a dude that has OCD and Tourette's that thinks some more laid-back resources for people interested in these things would be nice\* :)",8.101011904761902,11.18703868783069,6.560790343915348,69.06436011904763,64.23809523809524,9.169444444444443,34.03472222222222,9.673873057562805,3.727351587301587,948,42,139,21,16,281,111,189,0.015,0.7979999999999999,0.187,0.9846,2,0,0,0,0,0,66.0,0,0,1,0,5,8,0,0,10,0,14,4,0,2,0,34,22,12,0,4,7,0,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,1,12,8,0,0,8,0,1,1,1,0,1,1,3,0,8,8,24,15,5,17,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,7,3,90,20,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25004390964476536,0.2804160923347978,0.07846723511582153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08872561438197084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782320571499785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098125660772795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055503792348825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0891478444033049,0.0,0.060285035985809664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425144340714767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36795351064827597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460549932900825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5210322978904491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12569045939682508,0.0,0.11624043846013565,0.23256626408111586,0.12240755713169504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144165167364904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999493785251477,0.0,0.12055503792348825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221018033465074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391997832281927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098540016132481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623300706484848,0.0,0.0,0.07665811123251944,0.07393544197028618,0.0,0.1832090545695787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09520650287368967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037469268698695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196773779091665,0.0,0.2804160923347978,0.0
mentalhealth,YikesssIncarnate,2020/04/12,"Anyone worried they'll kill themselves or commit-murder suicide if the predictions of life not returning to 'normal' for years are accurate? Throwaway account for obvious reasons. Prefacing this by saying I'm not actively suicidal and have been on a medication that has worked well for over a year. A tweet came across my timeline that some health professionals are predicting that life won't resemble any bit of normalcy for at least a year and a half+. The immediate thought that popped into my head was ""wow, I bet murder suicides are going to sky rocket"" and sure enough, they have (quick google estimates domestic violence murder suicides are up 100%).

I live alone and work from home, so I could see the attraction of offing yourself if the professionals you're supposed to trust are telling you that life will lack a lot of the finer, enjoyable things for quite some time. So my question is: how are people who are already depressed and feel hopeless supposed to stay positive? Obviously, we have to be realistic and cannot sugarcoat what the data is likely projecting, but these brutal timelines are going to do a number on a larger amount of people than we think (i.e people in isolation, older folks, parents who are already at their wits end with children and significant others, medical workers, etc.) Seems like there's no right answer here.",12.059874476987446,9.851097016736409,10.764472803347282,60.455161087866145,55.820083682008374,14.078828451882845,44.82050209205021,12.516099999999998,5.7355569874477,1093,50,167,27,10,345,165,239,0.14400000000000002,0.774,0.08199999999999999,-0.9501,1,2,0,0,1,4,30.0,2,1,3,4,7,14,4,0,14,0,24,7,1,2,3,36,33,14,7,5,6,1,1,2,0,3,6,1,1,1,12,12,0,0,7,0,2,3,5,6,1,1,4,3,12,8,30,24,9,23,0,2,1,0,13,11,0,9,10,120,24,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953507008871117,0.2547265116195647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848611666684638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08070080929102967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260032218229597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132003943998088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214943786201348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940671834808858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022233795060915,0.11925448495260885,0.12871816620221968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835726128667775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118593981252147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844902522829852,0.12268068373629284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11577059476586685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768953050833098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445629551690888,0.1127718192979568,0.0,0.10191350615603346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981216543605309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23253681873513696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308213588441406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1281546319753787,0.0,0.0,0.2400425610427933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292911462884858,0.12275799495770127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866578022764157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985637277917468,0.0,0.09178259237695598,0.0,0.0,0.09197076402913773,0.10506942631905213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230169691545953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5049808452268184,0.0,0.10877721468210726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10087774431940896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07667655745451986,0.0739532330370677,0.0,0.09162657005912037,0.06729937941619653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10377189146675472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16804690121090954,0.11720947352623386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22297031120196587
mentalhealth,9raku,2020/04/12,"This meme literally made me question my sanity (please notice: english is not my first language)

This is not a joke. Today I stumbled upon this meme and the accuracy with which it was able to describe some of my behaviours left me speechless. Let me start by reporting you what the meme said and then I'll move to the actual question of the post.

So the meme is captioned ""19 year old thinker"" and describes a wojack-like character with the following behaviour:

\-Has created entire anthologies of imaginary events

\-Completely unaware of surroundings, except when driving

\-Inner monologue has become his entire reality

\-Has had multiple imaginary girlfriends

\-Imagines what it be like to start over with everything he's learned

\-Can't understand new things, gets caught in analysis paralysis. Just thinks about things he already knows.

\-Has no interest in any carreer, just wants to think

\-Thinks are always better in my head

\-Can't listen to music without pretending he's the artist

\-Barely reads. just thinks

\-hedgehog dilemma

Now, I'm sure the majority of people will find this at least a little relatable. What scares me is the extent to which this applies to me. Every single point in the list is something true/that I do on a daily basis. And many of these thoughts are actually somewhat debilitating for me, meaning that I've had the feeling that something was not right when doing/thinking them, as if I was concious that I was losing touch with reality. But I think them all the time. Even things like ""Can't understand new things, gets caught in analysis paralysis. Just thinks about things he already knows."" or ""Can't listen to music without pretending he's the artist"" , which seem somewhat oddly specific, they perfectly describe me. This meme made me realize for the first time that all these ""symptoms"" could be linked to something, and I wonder what that is. Again, I know that many people probably have these toughts too, but I am worried because the frequency and intensity of these ,and alike, thoughts, really do have an impact on my life and my attachment to reality.

I wonder if you can help me figure out what the common cause of these thoughts could be. I have recently read about compusive daydreaming, and I belive some of these bahaviours seem to fit in the symptoms of the syndrome.  Thank you.

​

By the way, also, I have ocd, I thought maybe that could be relevant to the issue.",7.507619316805298,9.124154866510537,6.871383348138579,72.02348946135831,63.56674473067915,10.105111846886864,36.503997415812,10.245366335075165,4.115236517806672,1956,93,305,45,29,605,223,427,0.034,0.9009999999999999,0.065,0.9329999999999999,0,0,3,0,0,0,80.0,0,3,3,5,15,10,0,1,25,0,39,4,1,3,4,74,75,20,0,6,15,0,2,2,1,1,3,3,0,0,34,14,0,0,30,7,0,5,10,2,0,2,15,5,35,8,49,51,10,45,0,1,0,0,19,19,0,13,21,223,69,4,0.08011024773526801,0.0,0.1563520914949139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17680730088674482,0.0640641361708585,0.06665814361388632,0.08679941995145493,0.097342719501921,0.05447771555743092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04883446346298257,0.08847547468109065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085100403161504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0822952918074684,0.0,0.0,0.0839940705891834,0.0,0.0,0.19188454255927587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05291206309140399,0.0,0.06749633884361665,0.0,0.07199792512586553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040506148298572034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07321931511052898,0.13628347159855989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370859602627255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08221622598341614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05369621040540204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361428533984007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207949127399238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08704001856379008,0.08191815594465357,0.0565842371169077,0.07827564103707542,0.08029151394795317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08962287580799523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15160450678373305,0.0,0.16243843480597428,0.08048151139921744,0.08726354490757908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08514451530354805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547419529225446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09120604801374957,0.08406222900400068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110767179175136,0.0,0.0,0.08793699535742851,0.07573007803022982,0.0,0.07672347281257323,0.0,0.0863723964554085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17948362310996044,0.0,0.16026385341204952,0.0,0.051320676039342636,0.0,0.0790992050662792,0.0,0.0,0.06841371385096179,0.07620319065838149,0.0,0.08020433332871471,0.0,0.0,0.14585872161540234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18501834761760605,0.0,0.0,0.11340489134440987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07550296042465092,0.1665304421259236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375475296341176,0.0,0.0,0.26610844467317324,0.3593198842711146,0.0,0.2543943532011846,0.09342585936796333,0.0,0.07593514780763089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16679518626408332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047251099699209764,0.06358778582715595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544468401518827,0.17375229278904128,0.0,0.08135584521912825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097342719501921,0.05158837302386913
mentalhealth,gaiashaypodcast,2020/04/12,"Mental Health Podcast Questions? Hello!

I've decided to start a mental health podcast.
I've always been passionate about helping others and many have encouraged me to follow that passion so I thought to myself why not give podcasting a go.
I'll be covering many different topics as I have a lot of personal experience with many mental health related struggles. 
I have created cover art and an intro/outro track.
For my first episode I was thinking of answering a few questions about myself and the podcast .

Any suggestions for questions I could answer related to myself or the podcast?

* please delete if this is not allowed *",4.904969696969693,8.12571370909091,5.577727272727274,71.39992424242425,75.54545454545455,8.393939393939394,33.71212121212121,9.075114841892004,4.047121212121214,508,27,70,13,12,164,73,110,0.023,0.8290000000000001,0.14800000000000002,0.9109,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,7,0,8,5,0,1,0,19,14,7,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,8,1,0,2,2,1,0,1,3,0,10,3,12,9,2,4,0,0,0,2,9,0,0,6,2,51,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11511229694314905,0.0,0.0,0.09407785200794284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11045547347687323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14453878742939216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13532581010068925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767432004983495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13271102537912782,0.07862340472005155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44115580050037695,0.0,0.0,0.09272826667229288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11761410641436257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4207736743467531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41825102940039344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079560200548214,0.0,0.15185885734393398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4649268116333035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791975008229732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14462593819935754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864448400093987,0.0,0.10982873486539246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12483286450298613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,four4t,2020/04/12,"What I'm going to do when I'm older... Is now I just read a post about cringing when asked that. 
I'm now 22... And I didn't think I'd make it to 18... 
I never prepped for anything so only now I'm finding out and I don't know what to feel. 
I'm in my first year of study... I'm not the oldest, but there are kids 4 years younger than me. I feel like I wasted so much time coz I didn't think of it when I was younger. 
Teenage years mental illness fucked me up more than the stuff now. It's all the same but I also feel like it's easier... Idk",-2.0955645161290306,-0.3193291854838698,0.5647580645161305,104.8171370967742,94.88709677419355,3.4225806451612906,14.201612903225806,4.557286568694721,-1.5135548387096778,407,8,111,1,16,138,74,124,0.133,0.812,0.055999999999999994,-0.8765,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,1,13,3,1,0,4,0,7,2,0,2,2,19,23,10,0,0,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,8,3,0,0,7,1,0,1,5,1,0,1,3,3,12,2,12,20,4,20,0,0,0,1,2,3,1,0,17,66,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16805445008044664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17293304455176878,0.0,0.19645904229175687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3187698555259699,0.3002580641652202,0.0,0.0,0.1920705166982975,0.1787508990480097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1942774806759563,0.0,0.0,0.11943136169363787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11549127483619405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053343820027016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14027472936445334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117787112243745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448219734258545,0.0,0.16207829271918744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15982623465469425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20126270020080572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21020383136912255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405679949756395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693073765644782,0.0,0.0,0.12253838385881585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40598326195873663
mentalhealth,Luduro,2020/04/12,"Daily Switches (Mood Swings) Dear reader,

I am looking for some guidance with my mood swings. I am a 24-year old male with a turbulent family background which persists to this day. I still reside with my parents but we don't speak and plan on moving out later this year.

I suffer from mood swings daily. I almost constantly feel a cold, hollow in my chest where I'm severely down. My cousin (a warranted psychologist) had suggested that I may be bipolar however she informed me that due to the family relationship, her diagnosis may be biased and advised me to seek an independent professional opinion.

I recently visited an ENT specialist about my headaches and was prescribed medicine with contains amitriptyline hydrochloride - a mild anti-depressant. I don't think it's helping.

I don't think I'm bipolar as my mood swings - from deeply depressed to insanely euphoric - switch several times a day.

Any help?

Thanks in advance.",6.5110099103350665,8.894003423312881,6.457055214723929,71.10109957527138,66.91411042944785,9.923360075507317,36.4648419065597,10.214889679676881,4.4119215667767815,750,39,114,20,13,237,110,163,0.11199999999999999,0.7979999999999999,0.09,-0.5605,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,1,0,0,3,3,8,0,0,9,0,11,3,1,1,0,21,18,5,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,6,9,0,1,4,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,2,4,20,2,18,12,1,19,0,2,1,0,14,6,0,5,10,71,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846794059812877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254183181552424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19930266451828824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2378834144900311,0.0,0.3176975485096349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3477272540425803,0.0,0.09325304746301502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2472382819817761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548742484934486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19601926769959227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19352763371562687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047870258937843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18210178538729455,0.1980081576682168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41670545850278506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14728555919292693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16979781508780115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363498285696091,0.0,0.0,0.10754226782679288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23753297710136445
mentalhealth,unq12,2020/04/12,"How to stop extreme laziness? I know laziness is not really a serious mental health issue, but I didn’t know where else to post this. Im so lazy that it’s seriously interfering with my life. I have tried to change and do something with my life and failed because of being lazy so many times before that I gave up. I just lay in bed the whole day and scroll through instagram (its on even fun anymore). I don’t have the motivation to change because I knew I’m gonna fail anyway. Any tips to change this?",4.187773109243697,5.053998813725492,5.01638655462185,85.0508823529412,70.66666666666667,8.181512605042016,27.31652661064425,8.418075326091056,1.6596761904761903,397,13,84,6,7,129,72,102,0.2,0.72,0.08,-0.9345,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,7,5,0,0,3,0,7,3,0,2,0,14,13,7,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,6,5,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,9,1,12,8,1,8,0,2,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,50,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12720772522459642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855140002076957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280609950738776,0.0,0.15917492137326986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5936564133672503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206387092054614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15626525429775182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12355186178286295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19883683089246426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020577107995107,0.19524282407085156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20560739330897196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26425308086286603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18965024110572626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885132397877517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1791524910314882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119835907015428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400850503381613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639116381047585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907662817489952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12700197089700302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20884664809819933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ILikeTakingPhotos888,2020/04/12,"I draw whenever i'm having a panic attack [https://imgur.com/Rds4J0V](https://imgur.com/Rds4J0V) (some) of the drawings

They aren't very coherent or nice looking but i guess it would be weird if they actually were. I just use drawing to kinda get what i'm feeling off my chest and it helps me calm down a little. Its like a nicer way to cope.

idk if its allowed to upload this or what not but I felt it might be nice to share",2.898518518518518,5.665167246913582,3.216296296296296,88.03333333333335,80.23456790123456,5.575308641975309,20.11111111111111,6.937597516519254,0.362022222222222,341,9,66,4,9,105,60,81,0.087,0.654,0.259,0.9474,2,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,2,0,1,8,1,1,4,0,7,1,1,2,0,18,15,7,0,3,8,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,3,8,5,7,9,1,4,0,0,1,0,4,3,0,8,1,44,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.27744162454279064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234390956365296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14375364576805286,0.0,0.2729783256297905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485381400892915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31319508956355274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19056430527059312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13889754082477995,0.2849492815060284,0.0,0.0,0.23874541864543994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3016037159452892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335718100159997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455490834805093,0.0,0.2345822081717336,0.0,0.2256688533205719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20196281083178605,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sammyame,2020/04/12,"Hi guys! I made a video on how to take care of your mental health while under quarantine. Hope it helps! # [This video will talk about media intake, journaling, and self-care](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8-rzG8IUP8)",5.574952380952382,9.198328828571434,2.5307142857142857,87.30845238095242,89.28571428571428,5.761904761904763,20.11904761904762,7.1686216300943375,1.0891904761904767,179,5,27,3,6,47,34,35,0.0,0.737,0.263,0.8513,0,1,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,4,5,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,2,5,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,1,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5907504244128347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28685510644275986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3079445951705591,0.0,0.0,0.19418424403948745,0.0,0.0,0.2877440470646309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2741274134665643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919561383581167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022271926286553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21782332762797693,0.23285521134970025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,szymonhimself,2020/04/12,"Can’t let go of trying to optimize every aspect of my life Hey guys, I hope I do not come off as rambling, but I have no idea what’s going on with my mind recently. 

I’ve been good in the last two years. Really good. Just to paint the picture, I beat a depression that used to cripple me up until late 2018, and in 2019, it felt as if I was getting better at life every single day. I learned how to be confident, improved my social skills and got really good at talking to women in particular, got accepted into uni, and managed to build a social circle there, something I have never been able to do. 

My physical fitness is better than ever with me working out and doing yoga a lot too, and I made strides in terms of spirituality last year, completing the Transformation Mastery program by Julien Blanc and letting go of a lot of trauma that guided me through life so far. 

Yet, for the last 3 months or so, I started doubting every single achievement of mine, started thinking I just lucked out, am a fraud, had to bend rules and cheat to achieve everything I did and so on... 

I’m working on a business that would help young men gain more confidence just like I did, yet my personal confidence feels at an all time low. 

I just feel like I can’t trust myself with everything, like I do nothing well. No matter what I do, even while meditating or doing yoga I constantly keep thinking that I’m doing something wrong. 

It feels like all the good mindsets I have managed to cultivate throughout the last 3 years broke down, and that makes me feel like even more of a fraud. 

What can I do to stop this vicious downward spiral? I logically know that I have improved so much, but my mind keeps trying to tell me I’m bad at everything and regressing in my progress. I don’t know if it’s just temporary and will pass as long as I continue doing a good hub or if I should be worried and seek help",8.990485924932978,6.354858482573729,9.003215482573726,72.03608327747993,62.02949061662199,12.005965147453082,38.86209785522788,10.270032843473604,3.8117239946380703,1486,58,288,25,16,490,194,373,0.129,0.6409999999999999,0.231,0.9934,0,0,2,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,0,10,18,26,2,1,15,0,32,3,0,4,4,67,59,31,0,6,14,0,5,5,0,3,3,0,0,4,13,19,0,3,13,2,0,5,7,9,1,1,10,5,38,17,49,42,10,54,0,3,0,0,11,23,0,11,31,200,51,8,0.08612370000623981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190969211585772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233882777454846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07418794164181662,0.09029906088458013,0.09306912370178742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05554266166809005,0.0,0.0741782166170805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376778320432356,0.0779038173305217,0.21768879521994047,0.0,0.2322072848321225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741869218031976,0.18458036547836,0.08269225800569444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0449960786286295,0.0,0.14683825030497474,0.3611823672698167,0.13776198088942684,0.0,0.0,0.08527600335500381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11545380140900165,0.0,0.0,0.08554026674704558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722317429425056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531014034210603,0.0,0.0,0.09466266638818747,0.2808092411288096,0.09715128489136496,0.0,0.0,0.1761346366311574,0.1824951488844199,0.21037844773463812,0.0,0.0,0.07621676435073409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464385798652957,0.0,0.08149232732985315,0.057488238515655675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739207717984031,0.0,0.0687431156769546,0.0,0.06331082902451587,0.0,0.0664239068025039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263801292502106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519989289948023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034609509474584,0.0,0.08503676371557638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558453268615093,0.0,0.1326044637761855,0.0,0.0,0.12191759628133553,0.0,0.0,0.07200326956922437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0692229677572412,0.07527590986119162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103691788828179,0.0,0.0,0.05021942206208747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694467799218655,0.0,0.08413034064303705,0.0,0.0,0.07438322481239576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743554934617869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539815866571824,0.08746279790021973,0.0,0.061179805474763815,0.09416274603189584,0.0,0.1663825173827932
mentalhealth,eleaxt,2020/04/12,"I never felt better than since the confinement started. This is a message for people who don't struggle with mental illnesses.

If you have one, you may recognize yourself in my experience.

I'd love to have feedback, if some of you feel the same thing or not.

Today I decided to explain to my friends on Facebook how I was managing the containment so far, but felt like this could be my first post on Reddit.

So here it is :

It  can be a bit shocking and may upset some of you but I never felt better than since the containment started. You'll wonder why I'm sharing my boring ""story"" here, but I hope you'll take the time to read it carefully, if you want to understand what it's like to live with a mental health condition.(TL ; DR at the end)

All the services, organizations, associations, medical appointments, job searching for which I used to be forced to go are now only accessible via mails, phone calls or videoconference.

I absolutely don't miss the outside. I absolutely don't miss ""the nature"" because even before the containment I never used to go for walks ""in the wild"" as I live in a quite crappy, dirty and sad neighborhood. I hate taking the subway, it mentally exhausts me.

I only go out for groceries and it became a quite exciting thing since the beginning of the containment, as I started cooking a lot of vegetables I never used to cook, cause every time I go to the supermarket, only the ""least popular"" ones are left, so I have to learn ""real"" cooking, follow recipes and eat new ""exotic"" (for me) ones. Same for the meat. Before, my ""cooking world"" was only composed of peppers, tomatoes, carrots and... that's all.

No wonder I got bored and almost stopped eating veggies.

You may think that my story is boring and wonder why I write this, but there actually is a reason : for some people like me (I'm Bipolar Type II with major anxiety problems), or like autistic people (I don't consider myself autistic but it's for the example), the outside world could be an extremely stressful, exhausting, noisy and visually aggressive place.

The containment made me understand that I'm not fit for the outside world, and I should stop trying and trying, and failing all the time fearing that if I cut myself from the outside world I'm gonna slowly lose friends, human interactions, lack of  subjects to talk about, and end up totally isolated.

It's not true.

Since the beginning of the containment, some old friends decided to call me to see how I was going.

I do, along with 5 other friends, ""Movie Nights"" on Google Hangouts  (allowing us to see everybody's face and reactions during the film)  every Friday evenings, always beginning with everyone cheering ""around"" a  beer before.

We play Cards Against Humanity online. We play Jackbox together and have tons of laughs.

I meet new and surprisingly interesting people on the multiplayer videogames I play. I have endless conversations with them. I speak to  people from different origins and situations than mine.

In supermarkets, as they monitor the density of the population inside, allowing people getting in only if others finished their shopping and got out, I feel less ""pressure"" from the people surrounding me. Same in the empty streets everytime I really need to go outside (go get my meds at the pharmacy...).

For me, containment has only brought me the experience of a more suitable life adapted to my condition.

Containment could be a Hell for you right now, but as you can see, for some people, the ""regular life with no containment"" IS THE REAL HELL.And yet we have to deal with that ""normal life"" everyday, with people not understanding why we struggle so much, thinking we're too weak, lack willingness, that we should force ourselves so we get used to all of that (most of the time, we don't).

Please understand this. People with medical conditions, who are struggling with them like me, can live  ""normally"" and even happily with less stress and exhaustion, if the ""normal"" people do a little extra effort to make our daily lives more bearable.

Allowing for example remote work is crucial.I'm also thankful that some supermarkets in France have taken the initiative to arrange  special hours only for disabled or elderly people, dimming the lights with no constant noisy calls and music.

I just wanted to share this.

\[TL ; DR\] :I have a psychiatric condition and even if containment is a Hell for  you to live right now, some of us are actually perceiving this momentum  like Heaven, almost willing that it will never stop.Your normal life could be the real Hell for some people.Please be attentive with us. We know it could mean making some extra effort for you, but it could be life-saving for some.

Thank you.",7.973144019173503,8.44701160260973,8.014728254291043,68.24331977630912,62.27402135231318,11.341893625777715,36.77703536930787,11.041547156221645,4.382020669620161,3723,165,597,94,49,1207,362,843,0.156,0.728,0.11599999999999999,-0.9908,2,0,1,0,0,1,151.0,12,13,4,10,23,60,6,8,54,0,56,25,1,15,11,174,122,51,0,26,23,0,5,6,4,10,15,1,0,2,34,47,8,13,23,12,2,10,17,28,0,4,11,10,80,31,100,87,33,75,4,5,3,1,55,30,3,32,40,429,114,9,0.0,0.0,0.08870321463413121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091021092473069,0.0,0.0,0.03634549923048984,0.03781715718390402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034768313105869905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040459190478868916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02770525071128001,0.0,0.11602109608000695,0.0,0.0,0.08039178443435767,0.04961846903161665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922534132174574,0.0,0.04633822121741575,0.0466885787249849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04911415585527235,0.0,0.2177236722690238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0468558593343442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04748446680798795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301121965395832,0.0,0.0,0.08050853806669843,0.0,0.0,0.12007437941523608,0.0,0.0765853807802518,0.04342840784936376,0.0,0.08891556449689086,0.0,0.05114269071140738,0.045960697195369014,0.0,0.13091432323128455,0.0,0.0,0.038658843373018864,0.0,0.0,0.14045494676909376,0.0,0.07123558267477774,0.0,0.1808077515185222,0.0,0.07269933498046266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04487141686852319,0.0,0.04831009571564476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04514105028406195,0.0447580488550435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045101057994612614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024977547685751986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04938040402659909,0.0,0.16050964467120385,0.13322433210485915,0.04555177565537274,0.20066122421106197,0.0,0.0,0.050845736138958486,0.0,0.03863906174605334,0.04101944091342282,0.04300488396465271,0.060675037950287634,0.0,0.0,0.049507217202297116,0.0504835242940891,0.091570046957463,0.13740551914254628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03341019878944938,0.033699811582676334,0.17526511379152526,0.08778973489740373,0.0,0.042650749437871054,0.17812123773449293,0.0,0.0,0.0476910150076753,0.0,0.0923921296771749,0.2419617570443088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37810285194474297,0.0,0.04748446680798795,0.09977857154183732,0.0,0.0,0.0435275192758838,0.0,0.0,0.043488495571653074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09668107978620226,0.045461237043203886,0.15519252415864335,0.029115753415006995,0.04672907768668639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762628930150647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10865075767361916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15038332439908256,0.051086510452470764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650697654221096,0.0,0.0,0.1139920414973508,0.10412320965172506,0.14253929379384694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834389024414914,0.03653013472102072,0.0,0.08368655154975854,0.0,0.0,0.060388509697849924,0.05824368853668541,0.0,0.0,0.10600656475598456,0.0,0.04308027893873023,0.0,0.0,0.061713690995487264,0.0,0.0,0.18925578885018196,0.1640084289953613,0.15701315973102276,0.0,0.0,0.0536139222474562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12303179201500715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786230334123895,0.03308736809646127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cinnamon_of_roll,2020/04/12,Do you'all have any advice on getting rid of nightmares? I've been having nightmares for quite some time now but it's just been getting worse and at this point I'm scared to go to bed. Recently I've just been avoiding sleeping for days at a time to the point that I've been hallucinating from sleep deprivation.,5.729918032786884,6.645969491803283,5.446024590163933,83.17920081967216,67.19672131147541,8.067213114754097,31.643442622950825,8.07648339933343,2.072340983606558,253,10,50,3,4,78,44,61,0.225,0.775,0.0,-0.9413,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,2,2,0,7,2,2,0,0,6,11,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,4,0,0,0,10,7,1,11,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,1,5,28,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24177475134210705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16825324295127253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15956463346417654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585321833010898,0.0,0.14061378458026644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4677814070271184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631603094532249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24429617929259614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477093439623933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4951948910380422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885437403776232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521408567141719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alwayswrite4,2020/04/12,"I don't know if my mom has Schizophrenia or something else; getting freaked out My mom has always been a bit quirky. She used to just watch videos on conspiracy theories and talk about it, etc. and it was always just kind of funny. Like, my mom believes in reptilian ppl and big events that were hoaxes, and so on. Pretty much any theory you can think of. 

However, now, it's to a whole new level. She is now super religious (never been religious up until 1-2 years ago)—which religion is fine, no opinion, really—but it's gotten to a level of insanity. She believes the Earth is flat and in a dome and on pillars, and the coronavirus was created so that they could microchip people so now she's talking about going off the grid (aka selling her house and just...living?). She's a retired veteran (Army ICU nurse) and receives money each month, and she is currently in the process of stopping the money flow, which means she will be receiving no money because she doesn't want them to be able to keep track of her. I'm pretty sure she has no savings, and nothing I can say changes anything. She's convinced the world is ending and all these signs (earthquakes and the virus and possible war) and God is going to protect his followers.

She's talked about having problems sleeping, which she claims is attributed to demons and technology. (Which, by the way, mental illness is caused by demons in your head). 

So, family history: My grandpa (her dad) has Schizophrenia. My cousin (her nephew) has Schizophrenia. No one has diagnosed her or anything, I'm not even sure if this is something she has, but given it's in the family I don't know if this is just late onset or something. She's 50 years old. A few years ago, my stepdad left her? and came back? (I don't remember, this has happened so much) and I finally told her he touched me when I was a child because she was so upset. Anyway, she ended up staying with him regardless, even though he constantly accuses her of cheating (he's been diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder). That was a big stressful event for her, and all of this ""crazy"" stuff started a little bit after all of this happened. 

I don't know what to do. I'm an only child. I don't have a father to go to, the man she's married to is insane, and I know if I bring it up to her she'll think it's ridiculous and will refuse to go to the doctor because she thinks modern medicine is fucked. She also has grave's disease; I don't know if that affects anything. As for me, I've struggled with anxiety and depression, but nothing to that extent (and I'm really worried I might end up like her when I'm older, which is another reason I'd like to know if she has it). 

At this point I'm freaking out because she's selling her house with no plans for another place and is talking about getting rid of our two senior cats. One has renal failure and they're declawed and she was recently talking about just ""letting them go into the wild."" they're 16. I would have never expected this and I'm honestly worried she's going insane. 

Thoughts? Is this indicative in any manner of Schizophrenia? Is she just insane, and I'm reading into it too much because of family diseases? 

tldr; My mom has been declining mentally and I'm worried it's late onset Schizophrenia; I don't know what to do.",5.135360446976017,6.073204441497666,5.760694409171716,80.31221891666368,68.54758190327613,8.708500526067555,31.599644450894324,8.907891778443368,2.6314402713782976,2601,107,486,44,43,844,280,641,0.138,0.813,0.049,-0.996,3,0,3,0,0,0,97.0,1,2,3,2,28,23,4,3,23,0,63,7,2,5,7,94,105,52,2,12,17,9,1,3,0,5,4,1,0,3,31,39,0,4,14,2,5,12,16,12,0,3,16,3,68,11,64,80,13,75,2,2,1,1,70,28,1,11,36,332,99,3,0.06494204116546881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1151344022292882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05193412685711217,0.10807396129623904,0.0,0.0,0.08832562990000202,0.1361947851257485,0.049680483737400236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603252993759876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049936421023276965,0.0,0.1979403276211817,0.0,0.0,0.14633488314867218,0.0,0.0,0.1417997782229908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427639433612583,0.0,0.06671336538548779,0.06870006854570565,0.0,0.0,0.07017927541707662,0.0,0.05185093548864247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055934484895313184,0.13182960952744724,0.0,0.0,0.07442920549021634,0.06647093096276195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05425074221303732,0.0,0.17255811796068468,0.0,0.07242754255280077,0.08578721141362962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836647301514532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07114083175487701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060037870595366125,0.06785907225011034,0.0,0.22144835150557127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485606505647902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06664927001510082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14986879243919898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05772347009441755,0.0,0.06762714232329256,0.2498331321040849,0.0,0.14651490222171362,0.0,0.0705597177441298,0.06640763704959708,0.0,0.09518220289272593,0.06508898613417008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074092124093936,0.0,0.0,0.13089260592739385,0.06889324297089612,0.0,0.3042373348835694,0.05183611767506414,0.0,0.1432196177509389,0.0,0.10017461139330837,0.0627214280370825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462727998960645,0.0,0.06814574777598037,0.0,0.0880128156139145,0.049391348706791766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045022634378576634,0.0,0.06785061080904413,0.0,0.061391220024129375,0.07321239369307689,0.0,0.13213880590103885,0.0,0.062140762781118436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06495961540411006,0.0,0.041603534506602265,0.0667712343997844,0.06412243098467778,0.0,0.07356667294614799,0.0,0.0,0.051644517717451086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498894153092928,0.0,0.0,0.14998666821073695,0.0,0.0,0.0459663109917703,0.0692195750688638,0.0,0.05429445432644127,0.07439088873879111,0.0678915218549979,0.07434309988724093,0.0,0.0,0.12241421048193288,0.0,0.0,0.2609897636400301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248367132024224,0.06380522571632033,0.05155672658899084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205490336363902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343893777101052,0.0,0.0,0.05608907243229146,0.0,0.0,0.038304498469661184,0.05154796947395009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725054697472523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19785538549568654,0.0,0.04613296276576162,0.0,0.0,0.12546163590631645
mentalhealth,nathan3636,2020/04/12,bad thoughts I'm having really bad thoughts and I dont know how to calm them down. It's really bad. I hate my life so much. It hurts so much. I'm panicking. I feel like I'm dying every day. I'm so pathetic I dont do anything with my life and i wanna die already can it stop already please,-2.4178205128205117,-0.9097406923076896,1.045576923076922,97.21400641025645,109.76923076923076,4.628205128205129,16.185897435897438,6.42735559955562,-0.09841025641025604,225,7,54,4,12,80,38,65,0.39799999999999996,0.513,0.08900000000000001,-0.9793,0,0,0,0,0,2,6.0,0,0,1,0,4,7,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,0,10,14,6,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,1,8,2,4,12,2,3,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,28,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36580275395028217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363922586632297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4151651166300421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689043869183087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3440298603980556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38849881525867774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396455152401877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08380457438817805,0.11840673845617687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16363676890610787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743116882884574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09108794604080901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2341381794046988,0.08097359361004915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436801581031149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18193589809091484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21235825144807946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385684596372569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631626480458609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon051300,2020/04/12,"I'm kinda losing my mind and I'm not sure if it's because of mental health issues or what I've been experiencing some very concerning things and I wanted to see if anyone can relate to this and offer any advice. This year, I went through some traumatizing things that caused me to struggle a lot with my mental health. Luckily, I'm pretty sure I'm over the hump by now and have accepted that things are getting better and that I'll be happy again someday soon. However, during my recovery, I things keep happening to me that make me feel like I'm going crazy and I don't know if I should seek more professional help or if this is part of the healing process and will go away as my mental health improves. Recently, I notice that I keep thinking that I'm losing things and then finding them in places that I've already looked. This happened once with a favourite sweater that was hanging in my closet; I wanted to wear it but I didn't see it when I searched for it. I looked around the house and then came back to my closet and looked more meticulously (I could swear that I looked at what was hanged on each individual hanger in my closet) and didn't find it. It wasn't until I looked in my closet a third time that I saw it hanging normally as it should. I'm highly doubt that anyone would have taken it in the time I couldn't find it. Also, almost the same thing happened with my house key, which I always keep on a hook in the closet near the front door. I remember pretty vividly looking on each of the five (or so) hooks that I could hang it up on and didn't see it. This happened after the sweater incident and so I was aware of the possibility that I was somehow not seeing it due to my anxiety and pessimism, so I made sure to look meticulously again with a clear head but somehow didn't see it until the next day when it was hanging on one of the hooks. I asked my family if they moved it and they said they didn't. This kind of freaked me out. Also, today, I realized that one of my final exams that I thought I had in a couple weeks is tomorrow. This dumbfounded me because I'm a good student and must have checked so many times when it was so I have absolutely no idea how I thought it was on a different day. Each time that something like this happens to me, I feel like I'm going crazy and it honestly makes me question reality to some extent because these things feel so surreal to me. I used to be such a well put together person with good intuition and these types of things would never get past me. I'd feel a lot better knowing that people who have struggled with mental health in the past experienced things like this and that once I heal more, my mind will stop messing with me like this.",6.866703296703296,5.835159021978023,7.056758241758241,79.20074175824178,65.00732600732601,9.9978021978022,31.954212454212453,9.04235418022936,2.4347223443223442,2150,68,439,30,28,696,231,546,0.08,0.82,0.1,0.9308,2,0,1,0,0,0,36.0,0,0,4,4,22,24,0,3,23,0,37,9,2,6,6,100,92,47,0,16,12,0,4,5,0,7,6,1,6,1,62,32,0,4,17,0,1,13,12,7,1,4,23,21,58,17,56,57,14,67,0,2,14,1,11,23,0,19,36,309,120,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05708755191090991,0.0,0.0,0.058499400333201224,0.0,0.06446815312316836,0.0934372397441207,0.048610293668346384,0.0,0.0,0.03972774529946085,0.0,0.044691299830139065,0.0,0.0,0.08169753666328801,0.0,0.0,0.05200637163701125,0.0546150090810688,0.0,0.05488770924485105,0.04492153450420723,0.0,0.10683725114618348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333585443434166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06681715554791316,0.0,0.06001364702646667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09328756606496688,0.06464084986892449,0.0,0.07535240338758285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061036684090140576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055073373592783734,0.0,0.11815605160399258,0.08347081768165426,0.0,0.06399648318498967,0.16018503742023849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061044295787355214,0.0,0.09960465286869817,0.09800019882962588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583039885380992,0.06218939858875285,0.0,0.0,0.0599559884611671,0.2483918004162345,0.0,0.0,0.03915783451461361,0.06172415809100519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348181546195149,0.0,0.06594930480483725,0.0,0.060975519942199664,0.0,0.15577969748814752,0.0,0.0608356575230061,0.06421243787390292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14270581550885092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3434078332149255,0.1307145406767917,0.0,0.09933354479349688,0.0,0.05527861410970076,0.07799188603094942,0.059228922310551727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354953195693465,0.0,0.11797551432039308,0.0,0.0,0.062091436526178025,0.0,0.0,0.04505726651948545,0.0,0.06213055482340143,0.0,0.05723940084084597,0.0,0.06651179492724517,0.0,0.12443123148885632,0.0791740908218063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326339312442719,0.11153739937122564,0.040501216992799516,0.05101027295312472,0.061036684090140576,0.0,0.0,0.06586000762622006,0.0,0.1188687095909688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05872844561562743,0.06544400395075227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057682908325151425,0.0,0.06617870823320869,0.0,0.055570996663598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327667136250232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04497473088869729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048841910441988684,0.0,0.12214697325348252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651810662624227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34930611768328873,0.03743331089547139,0.0,0.09275824037576763,0.13626117422052664,0.0,0.055375527048269965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050456303254125666,0.0,0.0482027905205964,0.06891550553329262,0.0,0.04686116764803197,0.0,0.05252678369773363,0.0541561188461804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300008035007045,0.0,0.0,0.03762069908649635
mentalhealth,HelenaDelRey,2020/04/12,"Everything is falling apart again. Kinda had to vent a little bit. So due to the quarantine I'm stuck at home and it's really affecting my depression and social anxiety. When the quarantine is over, I think it'll be very difficult for me to get back to that socializing stuff. But I can deal with that. The most disappointing thing for me is that I can't find a job that suits me and could save me from moving in with my parents again. I don't think I'll be able to to pay for rent next month. Well, I can work as an essential worker at a supermarket but I'll definitely get sick with corona if I'm not already.

The thing is, I had to leave the house yesterday for a long period of time to get my subsidized prescription for antidepressants and neuroleptics (it was very quick and a lady that works at the reception just gave it to me through the window) and I had to go to a pharmacy to get my medication. I live in Moscow and there's no one that's going to deliver my prescription and my medication to me (I get it for free at a welfare pharmacy because of my diagnosis [F21]), so I had to leave the house. And it's resulted in me getting sick. I don't have a cough, not even a high temperature. Just a runny nose and fatigue. I hope I'm not going to die... Really, everything is falling apart. I'm really sorry if I infected someone too and I've been thinking about this since yesterday but I have to have my medication, you know.",2.9319425287356324,4.621186372413798,5.113534482758624,79.92283045977015,74.93103448275863,9.660919540229887,26.56609195402299,10.02789654360092,2.743091954022988,1128,42,232,35,24,393,140,290,0.131,0.8140000000000001,0.055,-0.9409,3,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,0,3,14,8,0,0,19,0,23,9,1,2,0,36,43,20,1,4,10,1,0,0,0,1,8,0,3,0,16,14,0,0,5,0,3,6,7,4,1,1,8,1,30,5,40,31,2,31,0,3,0,0,6,12,0,5,13,162,46,5,0.11216973830350987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12378209549516225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580954278011005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625160493066297,0.0,0.0683776313479496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246030251991848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955840870067629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11564207483423805,0.09661163123688543,0.0,0.11641447904125765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408705425147108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201621856081432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10252110868325956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3516243517701988,0.0,0.1912459416915548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851348706363872,0.11251539327985363,0.11140985971031617,0.0,0.25885763560980674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11131115719167718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0616455546795257,0.0,0.0,0.2375431136635635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11242354582770273,0.09904793396687037,0.09926668862279163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.338997631457414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08953281495213554,0.11921868012615786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.119293789223719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07600911765010265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245512199924878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21557641988259474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09278796665475564,0.0,0.0,0.22868584466439165,0.09504105526000482,0.0,0.0,0.1255648385590442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284075139827538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14904117983998152,0.21562151726810375,0.0,0.0,0.0654070764499172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185103562931431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008540657788748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16332181084018135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dev10251,2020/04/12,"Self-Harm Sobriety I was clean from self-harm for almost 2 years.  I was pretty proud of myself.  Dealing with my depression has never been easy, and it was the unhealthy coping mechanism that I used to help me muscle through it.  I'm not sure if it's this quarantine that's had an impact, but this weekend I cracked.  I felt my inner demons coming and I don't think that I was ready to face them.  Truth be told, maybe I'm masochistic.  It's like a relief, a good feeling.  It distracts me from the rest of the world.  The only thing that I need to focus on is the pain, which is better than feeling nothing.  

Emotionally, I'm numb and confused.  I don't feel much anymore, I don't have the same passion as when I was younger.  I just needed somewhere to vent this frustration out, as I don't have anyone around me that I feel comfortable sharing these details with.",3.2967919799498766,5.021168842105265,4.009828738512951,88.06907894736842,74.02923976608187,6.523141186299082,26.249373433583962,7.1686216300943375,1.1981057644110271,676,24,135,7,14,215,107,171,0.14300000000000002,0.611,0.247,0.9578,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,2,3,16,1,2,9,0,17,4,1,1,3,27,31,8,0,3,4,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,16,8,0,0,6,1,0,1,6,6,0,0,9,5,21,10,18,21,3,10,1,1,0,1,5,5,0,3,5,93,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814862924750996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1797419860108309,0.1267276497615107,0.0,0.0,0.1613425696626598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16029259269510346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15612273884736558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868511124241001,0.15610227329105605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20387129385394048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665627958058712,0.0,0.17401940956460107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15201602619947846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148176164085173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08854500806442593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18208055485628125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323270341865587,0.2687752341825139,0.13978393287978455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739052550217427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1378416522199437,0.1928527892723172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843868592847822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3781469702437037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17081713164181406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040820907969313,0.11613166580839525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731831713843588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15653369705387318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11671301173414887
mentalhealth,fairy_lightss,2020/04/12,"is this normal or an eating disorder? I don't have bulimia or any eating disorders, although I have had an unhealthy relationship with food in my past and difficulties with self esteem and body image. I've been gaining a bit of weight and not feeling great physically and, in turn mentally, since being at home in lockdown for the past three weeks. I'm not doing any exercise and my portions are probably too big for someone who lounges about the house all day every day, and sometimes when I feel too full I just make myself throw up. I don't know if this is a normal thing to do for someone when they're feeling full/uncomfortable or if this is something that could spiral into something worse? 

Also sorry if this isn't the appropriate subreddit!! I tried r/EatingDisorders but the moderators weren't accepting any new posts.",8.655974025974025,8.205183525974025,8.54477272727273,68.08715909090913,61.14285714285714,11.596103896103894,37.43181818181819,10.9516,4.1871064935064926,669,28,113,15,8,217,102,154,0.11699999999999999,0.87,0.013000000000000001,-0.8803,0,1,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,7,2,0,0,8,0,16,6,1,1,1,29,23,17,0,6,10,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,7,9,4,0,5,1,0,1,6,0,0,1,3,4,9,2,14,18,4,18,0,0,0,0,3,8,0,6,8,79,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792318789002232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753213771388477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473355290060834,0.1499041970283608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10775030970310516,0.0,0.0,0.17406917436844682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093394503666585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761846046173843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370511637713752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204711383692227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16318770306841227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878798225170672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537052129622482,0.0,0.0,0.15571955113221878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416754836208292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900832793548462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13600254936203118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13034004560046952,0.0,0.0,0.2644538142854385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257658974988346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12924925343320054,0.0,0.1455039422729117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448907928172022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14078713643488658,0.0,0.0,0.11163588421034347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286932804490109,0.20778937157374586,0.13347360339462996,0.15107068603436727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08965787534226774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916253512774075,0.1467919101353638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825248294307868,0.16433841133898094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753032172584273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DumbWeebAlex,2020/04/12,"What is my problem? I crave for sweet so much that I buy pastries behind my parents back and I hate eating in front of people but I have so much craving that I'm willing to have anxiety while taking a few bites and chew slowly just to keep the taste and not finish all of my treat. 

When we moved here, I've gotten better with food and I wouldn't have these kinds of cravings even during periods. But after January, it has gotten worse and I take tiny amount of foods because I don't feel like eating even if my stomach is bugging me to eat something but the need for food is not there. 
mom and dad tells me in so skinny almost every day and I don't like seeing my body at all. I also don't drink water at all unless it's from school or when I visit someone and they offer water and all I drink is tea or any sweet juice.

I just forget my face when I'm away from my reflection for a few second but when I do, I just imagine that I have a giant badly photoshopped anime eyes, the noses are so big it covers half of my face, my stomach fat hanging while it's so thin including my arms and legs. Or I just forget I exist. That's why I'm scared of my reflection.

I view in a camera perspective and don't think about foods at all except sweets. I don't like sweet things but it's like a drug to me, that I can't stop eating. 

I've been imagining cutting myself and the urge is growing and growing and growing, I did that once in my palm and it was a nice, painful feeling then I got absolutely scared, but I feel the urge to do it. My voice keeps telling me to kill myself, jump infront of the cars/buses, get myself into accident while I drive or jump off the high building but in a joking way like a silly stupid humor where people laugh in my brain.

I or my voice think that it's just my paranoid mind or delusion, that I'm faking all for attention and I shouldn't have existed, I serve no meaning whatsoever.

I also get a random jump, the fast wild Shriver that last a second and it's been happening more and more.",3.3222142857142885,4.247257269047624,4.5638095238095255,87.27785714285716,72.73809523809524,7.028571428571429,24.0,7.1686216300943375,0.8534428571428574,1583,42,334,15,30,523,201,420,0.16,0.7340000000000001,0.106,-0.9764,1,0,4,0,0,2,30.0,1,0,1,1,23,27,4,2,18,0,27,30,13,0,6,73,50,48,1,5,23,3,4,5,0,3,3,2,0,0,21,21,17,3,11,3,1,11,11,10,0,3,7,15,53,17,37,40,13,45,0,0,3,0,9,17,0,9,21,232,74,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957155170149148,0.0,0.0,0.15288009209693132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650017206931369,0.0,0.07312298664508808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898061422546508,0.07349969188886281,0.07981027182977285,0.058268305154491835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08453800104808472,0.0,0.1061744370948622,0.0,0.10670552730120188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061645027192402925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18727567319857705,0.11084935020198454,0.3912331410436762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626723096489825,0.0,0.08053528163633956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1449933781795344,0.06828661853412905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.462331618662129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987942267473074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644881252501234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452633589102587,0.0,0.0,0.09437133192030676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099179940888807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16992236046384013,0.1057516864131764,0.0995380530328622,0.0,0.07791530323441716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23349232359075106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412111658382026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651455642245366,0.11194910406478563,0.0,0.10159273283915854,0.14053333634286594,0.07087576739194723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179591232492456,0.0,0.0,0.10171018527749627,0.0,0.10613688059705137,0.0,0.0,0.13253451837518768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091462840639343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19139641301281546,0.09673807989351467,0.07616962297590284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098966139839743,0.07358673072030021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991413045815217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373747033336964,0.0,0.16709265890266073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06350305484632697,0.12249522851626875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587167434497909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625144833304894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741024455742234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PM_ME_YOUR_FAV_FOOD_,2020/04/12,"How to find a will to live First I’m not suicidal, but if I was killed by a car while crossing the street or something I’d be okay with that, maybe even grateful. 

I have a toddler who I love so very much, but I feel like she’d be better off without me. The days I have her I’m told I’m a good dad by those around me (my parents if I’m visiting them with her, or my girlfriend when she comes over on the days I have my daughter, or just friends I’m around). But I feel like I’m a shit dad. Especially with howI feel about dying.  I don’t get to have my daughter very often because at first her mom didn’t want me to be part of her life, but since then I’ve been able to get to an agreement with her mom to see her. 

I grew up in a very religious house and I’m not religious. My family thinks I am because I can’t tell them I don’t believe in any of the religious stuff they do, or any religion for that matter. I want to tell them but I’m afraid. 

My girlfriend and I have been getting in a couple arguments over the past couple weeks and I’m afraid of losing her. I don’t think we are breaking up anytime soon, but my anxiety is always like “dude, she wants to break up with you” then randomly she’ll text me that she misses me and loves me when I’m at work or something so then I’m like why do I think we’re going to break up? Fuck anxiety. 

I decided to start seeing a counselor/therapist about my anxiety but they’re very busy. My first meeting was three weeks ago and my next one is this week. But I’m worried it’s a waste of time and money. What if it doesn’t help? 

Idk what to do. How do I find happiness or a will to live? I want to die, but like as an accident or something so it hurts less for my family and friends",0.8177515993134641,2.38326302122016,2.7566929318146367,95.04781518177565,80.59151193633951,6.345108441254486,21.698314869714466,7.285733465282438,0.459987423935091,1337,40,325,18,34,448,166,377,0.131,0.6970000000000001,0.172,0.9434,1,0,3,0,0,1,31.0,1,1,4,6,15,22,3,2,17,1,30,5,1,2,0,57,65,38,4,7,23,7,3,5,4,3,1,0,0,0,12,16,0,0,9,0,1,6,9,8,0,5,6,5,54,14,46,52,3,45,0,3,2,3,38,16,2,12,25,208,66,1,0.0871461222272963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724977925836507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251255482340788,0.0,0.0,0.11852470296485405,0.0,0.19999963492336745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15515704966624974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10624693449739404,0.0,0.0,0.098183837342736,0.0,0.07707366325553817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506866785380635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19285105339753514,0.0,0.11240407883558301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18088783254723906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05755919183647596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16430721645926666,0.0,0.132191093538348,0.12451441426359805,0.0,0.0,0.15929995386125825,0.2223793411437632,0.0,0.0,0.1346577557150124,0.08056518574523013,0.1365907561206316,0.0,0.0495271495449473,0.0730940327044918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09276866758651513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058412208767539525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055492458795937,0.09329172624329136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641427247230952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061553883346156114,0.2128759669979731,0.0,0.15390324503534952,0.0,0.0,0.09749421965757976,0.0,0.0,0.1573055554438188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754999301226764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20412897020218734,0.0,0.0,0.06406242699840091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268088963993096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059052467780586086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967654556851594,0.0943707580445458,0.08319083445522282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13888835313735026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945424214289288,0.07208817284959831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20126802739467706,0.0,0.0,0.06168247385110984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09976146042318236,0.09532371332867236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15233910389495714,0.0,0.0,0.10118336469267486,0.0,0.16751914895118622,0.0,0.0,0.0508156046812872,0.0,0.0,0.08327185435320476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2876187100710347,0.2056041630713213,0.0,0.2097100880330324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07863582059791882,0.0,0.0,0.08400575201048986,0.0,0.06344341488677811,0.08850111729525824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PsychoticOracle,2020/04/12,"I don't feel like a normal person anymore. When I was younger I used to feel like everything I did was normal for an average person, but when I told my friends a lot of the stuff I did and do they thought I was weird or crazy. When I was young and a close relative died I just laughed and joked around with everyone close. I understood what death was and knew the person would never come back so it's not because I was naive. I used to hit and choke a lot of my family pets to the point where they stop getting them because they knew I would hurt them but not kill them. When people cry, are sad, or get hurt i would always think it was very funny. My friends always called me a sociopath but when I looked it up I wasn't really like it. Afterwards they distanced themselves to the point were we don't even talk anymore. I also told some online friends and they ended up unfriending me. Does anyone else experience this or do I really need help as most people say?",3.0448269230769216,4.718017184615388,3.746714743589745,89.90776442307694,74.58974358974359,7.131410256410258,23.469551282051288,7.865858978985527,1.0177243589743594,761,22,161,11,16,241,105,195,0.203,0.643,0.154,-0.8818,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,8,0,12,13,1,0,10,0,19,0,0,2,1,42,36,20,3,6,9,0,2,3,3,3,0,1,1,3,7,12,0,1,7,1,0,1,6,5,0,0,17,4,32,8,12,15,4,20,0,3,1,0,21,8,0,7,14,110,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010270434356897,0.18750206793126814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22347808368169544,0.07878196115091585,0.11544442935336675,0.0,0.10030079528085042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663680034162607,0.0,0.13736600495000406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150493644957487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705581670451956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12376345446900885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693438035941167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09859887380925199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412189790904453,0.0,0.0997927825472179,0.0,0.0,0.07441792337944131,0.0,0.0,0.10766166582960476,0.1012611446701623,0.11021354760597303,0.10621589232778572,0.0,0.11393936521704565,0.16098391663714104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26114727016277145,0.0,0.11773156292398995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552078369752219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24123259253648785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246534169887711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651356132280562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461499673138936,0.0,0.0,0.19157717078195874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08354388366526075,0.08689857651729352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22078669382312516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15622332980942188,0.2951390829802002,0.0,0.0,0.21302042729414256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443594490231619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896002492477536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09419773589590633,0.0,0.0,0.12898097560308075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056042696031262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07219482410764998,0.0,0.0894479367208981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153233316592095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19462258888751066,0.0,0.0929651131541602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401140611844359,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lsuguy13,2020/04/12,"If you’re struggling, reach out! There are mental health resources all across the country. I personally have had my own bouts and glad I reached out for help. If you or someone you know is battling something, feel free to DM me. There are facilities that are nice and will help you with therapy and give you tools to get better! I’ll gladly assist in anyway possible. Even if it’s just to talk. Hope everyone has a Happy Easter!",3.2242682926829285,5.692502097560976,3.805060975609756,86.03856707317075,76.8048780487805,6.539024390243903,24.88414634146341,7.645422480735847,1.3645317073170733,340,12,64,5,8,107,65,82,0.05,0.645,0.305,0.9715,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,4,0,1,5,9,1,1,2,0,8,1,0,0,1,15,13,7,0,4,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,6,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,8,8,9,11,2,4,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,5,0,43,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21882382090771302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16341927649471968,0.0,0.0,0.23642142560713816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251035219909211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926729180235455,0.23734882578296104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26338431890143843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629970166055112,0.0,0.0,0.3316822419039114,0.0,0.0,0.2457449395469327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597614383006382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24934223419418336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160385259162972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27893006919370145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20963906103172225,0.1904768197105116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586582125434724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19886767570022865,0.0,0.0,0.2829475448065561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jumpsuit21,2020/04/12,"Covid 19 and panic disorder Hi all! 
Just wondering what people’s feeling are. 
I have a panic disorder that can lead into agoraphobia. My mom has always been my support person with it but I don’t live with her anymore. 

She’s been trying to get me to come over cuz I’m starting to spiral again and worried that once this is over I won’t be able to leave my house. 

I feel like to me personally it’s a good idea to help me but other family members don’t think it’s a good idea. 

How are you all coping with your mental health during the quarantine?",1.2847050147492602,3.5359063716814174,3.4329424778761077,87.22221607669618,82.6283185840708,6.244542772861358,20.03613569321534,7.492282038375204,0.7289356932153397,432,12,88,7,12,147,77,113,0.10400000000000001,0.741,0.154,0.8313,0,1,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,0,1,3,6,0,2,4,0,12,1,0,3,2,21,21,6,0,0,3,1,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,2,8,7,0,0,6,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,2,2,14,4,12,17,2,7,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,1,3,60,22,1,0.1547572297508175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12877041249587498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534775874046807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330965028872455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3547303856640973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589134316833344,0.0,0.15649981059297308,0.11055859585594063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085426517569667,0.0,0.0,0.259606043815904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16449969845080165,0.0,0.0,0.1037305089595756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785690650290424,0.0,0.3494041505478514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16386556112615247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756065653666317,0.0,0.1366534691538557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595888829992455,0.0,0.0,0.18124979708209432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16481139895502722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3631485296094015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728917735676684,0.27025608750758634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953796374871876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756166703650833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09916218400126686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507000046944656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782761416331932,0.0,0.15716347890665344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway-couk,2020/04/12,"I want to hurt people... This is obviously a throw away account but I need some help. I want to hurt people, but not just hurt them I want to watch the fear is their eyes as I punch and kick them over and over until they bleed. I want to see life fade from their eyes.
I've told my therapist and my psychiatrist about this and they've just ignored me and told me that it's because of my autism...",1.1788253012048209,3.0957745180722926,2.2466114457831345,97.43449548192774,80.92771084337348,5.595783132530121,17.60391566265061,6.6274283507984215,-0.4187337349397593,307,6,74,3,8,97,50,83,0.20600000000000002,0.695,0.1,-0.9274,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,5,0,3,5,0,1,2,0,2,4,2,0,1,18,10,9,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,5,0,0,2,4,16,0,12,8,1,6,0,3,4,0,8,3,0,1,2,47,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17930257896392213,0.0,0.0,0.11633566617784573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21475059208241387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791753949489784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.612901737225786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479752726577002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14150711254680434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26461197808752124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520765673194443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215825650560669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647159024727336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45025482180716025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Youriee,2020/04/12,"I analyze myself too much Whenever i feel an emotion, i analyze why i feel it. For example, when i feel anxious about my friends not texting me back, i think its all because of my past and i have a anxious attatchment style.

When i feel lonely, i ask myself why i end up being alone and distant from everyone. Even if its just a phase, i analyze and that actually makes me think that i have a big problem that boils down to my childhood that i dont even remember.

I sometimes can't sleep because i also analyze my body. I feel like my heart is not working well and i'll die in my sleep.

Also when i have a relationship problem, i blame myself because i pity myself and i think i have a lot of mental problems.

But when im feeling okay, which is most of the time i dont have any thoughts like these.


I suffured from panic disorder and i really think it has to do with this habbit. How do i stop? Do i even wanna stop? Idk i feel so safe when i feel like i know every reason for my every emotion.",2.348483723586522,3.8783259271844703,4.372775556824674,85.29481153626503,76.13592233009709,7.371330668189606,27.166190748143922,8.124751697461798,1.768303597944032,775,31,161,13,17,266,106,206,0.195,0.7190000000000001,0.086,-0.9576,0,3,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,17,13,0,1,7,1,15,5,4,3,1,40,31,17,1,5,5,0,8,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,11,7,1,3,16,0,0,0,5,6,1,0,1,8,42,7,15,29,4,16,0,2,0,0,3,4,0,3,15,120,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.09822816834117044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10425184102944167,0.0,0.1609931198810337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845122650363522,0.0,0.0,0.22743089003927155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09410210242052347,0.0,0.0,0.0774001673153116,0.0,0.18408144791777084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118088931335588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446762310059797,0.0,0.11536335284026752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359420066648481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264545111921944,0.08915354717115588,0.0,0.0,0.19945195453135853,0.0,0.1696182422877057,0.09618350303563593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.407167665325818,0.14382089405028725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07776850147139995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11928079804964715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10872844478842232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055319274931476974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14752996467053325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08557625058778415,0.0,0.0,0.0671903252488718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144008512739623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739955737689629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810105265249025,0.0,0.0,0.09608992066420896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28894974876860097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448440768749432,0.10349369475205647,0.0,0.10806955036135668,0.11402644959694792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014623733564811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955382273438124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16831001353505992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579915898646966,0.0,0.07991159923851103,0.05869477634530616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09050407319364824,0.0,0.18165726578175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07328058124502046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,halfbreed_prince,2020/04/12,Major depression Has anyone ever tried shrooms for their depression? Heard lots of good things about it.,6.647058823529411,10.46346811764706,4.383823529411767,78.77220588235295,73.70588235294119,8.105882352941178,26.14705882352941,8.841846274778883,2.803258823529412,86,3,12,2,2,24,16,17,0.305,0.5760000000000001,0.11900000000000001,-0.6705,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,1,3,1,2,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721087369272161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.67036345259513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3520162275241571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32640776468023697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3308487197069627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585396774105919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642131399105931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MarinaraSaucey12,2020/04/12,"How are you guys handling quarantine? *trigger warning*

It’s really making me contemplate suicidal thoughts tbh",6.036470588235292,7.663298529411763,5.865411764705888,59.06635294117652,122.52941176470587,10.771764705882354,44.576470588235296,8.238735603445708,7.855832941176473,93,7,9,4,5,29,17,17,0.231,0.769,0.0,-0.6705,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,4,3,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5173431063705418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3487633416595242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3347177949611617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5715146836109894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4147953784201658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ArchimperatorLykos,2020/04/12,Dos and donts when youre going through low self esteem With Covid ruining pretty much everything my self esteem is at an all time low and im wondering what to do and not do when going through a bout of low self esteem,8.136666666666667,5.750293000000003,8.131666666666668,76.8375,63.444444444444464,11.666666666666668,33.611111111111114,10.125756701596842,3.0021111111111103,175,5,36,3,2,57,33,45,0.171,0.763,0.066,-0.4767,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,1,7,7,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,6,7,2,9,0,4,0,0,4,4,0,1,3,23,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799500000557558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21467799283973252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715069070323109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580170318532429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755945130209244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24301331379451255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7475702067115388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928509698980282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25904075292478435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Janka0808,2020/04/12,Why do I feel so disgusted and uncomfortable when I open up to people? I don’t have a super hard life but there are things that are quite heavy and I want to talk about but when I do I feel gross and disgusted with myself. I feel like I should have stayed quiet and not burdened anybody. I always regret it and wish that they never knew.,2.4773913043478264,4.2936407246376875,3.4312318840579716,90.9451086956522,76.53623188405797,6.339130434782609,18.746376811594203,7.1686216300943375,0.12765507246376814,266,5,57,3,6,85,46,69,0.244,0.5820000000000001,0.17300000000000001,-0.7738,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,2,5,7,2,0,1,0,8,1,0,0,1,19,14,10,0,4,3,0,4,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,5,11,2,5,12,0,6,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,42,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24061751470249484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43864807232987607,0.2065873211729143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25904480700741417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20425349054531214,0.14127673819708708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22303028167604413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004781588386028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30757416565953577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082230339679867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324286351185722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19211561896922189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1705634384665815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609362718627384,0.0,0.33253801443088754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luckysyete,2020/04/12,Is it normal to want to die? Why do I always get the feeling that I want to die?,-1.8063157894736823,-0.3473039999999976,1.778157894736843,99.2346052631579,89.0,3.8,14.76315789473684,3.1291,-1.3576526315789479,60,1,16,0,2,22,14,19,0.336,0.495,0.16899999999999998,-0.7941,0,0,0,0,0,2,2.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,3,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,10,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821788610143074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7039156554865932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17147160378745638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17717862366991902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3322701369510315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4000489894236685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30600723344094843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ploutons,2020/04/12,"I don’t know what to do I’m 14f and I skipped 9th grade because everyone thinks I’m “smart”. I do online school and was supposed to start my first 4 courses in September of last year but didn’t because I was doing really bad in terms of mental health, so I ended up starting in October, which is only a month late but the thing is I’m not a disciplined person at all. Never really cracked down and set up a schedule or did anything to make sure I would be done on time, and now it’s April and I still haven’t finished any of the courses from September and on top of that I have 4 new courses to do. I can’t take it. I know it’s my fault and I can’t live with myself anymore. Every time I feel motivated to do homework I end up not doing anything because I get too anxious to concentrate. I look to my parents for encouragement but never get any because I’ve let them down so many times they don’t really think I can do it anymore. What should I do? I don’t want to drop out and I do truly want to get all my schoolwork done but I don’t know how I could possibly get anything done without breaking down and giving up.  All I know is that I can’t do this for much longer and by the end of this summer I’m either going to be doing good in school or dead",1.3254444444444466,2.954451414814816,3.4382407407407416,90.44958333333336,79.2962962962963,6.277777777777778,23.472222222222207,7.1686216300943375,0.7988888888888891,982,33,219,12,24,335,131,270,0.077,0.8140000000000001,0.11,0.6768,1,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,3,6,6,0,0,6,0,37,1,0,3,6,44,61,19,1,5,10,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,12,12,0,1,8,0,0,1,14,2,0,1,7,2,30,4,36,48,6,43,0,0,1,0,6,16,0,2,23,153,42,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14551402120084694,0.0,0.0,0.1208684820028189,0.2122110753227818,0.0,0.0,0.2641314762073274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933235507647967,0.26088095210942225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542297557934421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284643883713012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842847049461998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901438650737428,0.10223372914403488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05409746409125148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09100581665640732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22359187224029373,0.10263475700409336,0.06080500105567047,0.08973831073654544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137255885006612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351960821262108,0.08721129968425957,0.1206896153034396,0.0,0.0,0.10940473695430727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09447431421782924,0.0,0.0898448289301945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07141679493673428,0.10847127859679853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10782096575771184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539856364317541,0.0,0.07865011366607055,0.0,0.1650348889962702,0.10333181002465977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137087469396417,0.0,0.0,0.1187999650524772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934197232187591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12061538445953272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056220015326633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.216559605783488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15145644044098766,0.0,0.08544251867757295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10083700529234783,0.0,0.0804433216629234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107954043901657,0.13711001100622344,0.0,0.0,0.18716055282887306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12621119393572436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031347429967598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0760027743878537,0.0,0.0,0.06889818643366866
mentalhealth,BiForHalsey,2020/04/12,"Is this okay? Normally(when we weren't confined to our houses because of quarantine), the only way I got through the day was imagining that one of my favorite celebrities was friends with me and following me around as I gave them tours of the places we went. I also do the same with other fictional characters, as well as do these actions at home. I'm not talking/saying anything out loud, it's conversations taking part in my brain, so no one besides this sub will know about it.",6.028498168498168,7.060065274725275,5.885439560439561,79.88039377289377,66.58241758241758,9.143589743589745,33.84798534798535,9.2995712137729,3.056910622710624,384,17,70,7,6,120,72,91,0.031,0.8590000000000001,0.11,0.7378,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,3,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,4,1,7,1,1,0,0,12,14,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,7,7,0,1,2,0,0,3,3,0,1,2,6,1,11,3,15,7,2,10,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,1,54,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19872371899920946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20449263756319885,0.2212158580810854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15148204244591568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774058928434169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16026061854691412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19198889797044985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19874650949858685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24926370283150756,0.0,0.0,0.28673326767752944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656797327545842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3367772810835956,0.1889938869754252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690990614154191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596274652588039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19761554199167145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868395307223857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972461042602132,0.0,0.0,0.22342949838985324,0.2303600871161933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JAG2k5,2020/04/12,"My friends are leaving me because of depression Hello, I'm a 14 year old male and I dont know what to do anymore. I've had depression for two years now and was pretty good at hiding it until recently when my parents started fighting more and a re talking about a divorce. My friend group that I have fallen in with is NOT supportive and they are starting to not want to be around me because I dont find the same things fun anymore. They have started to draw me out, made a groupchat without me, stopped inviting me places, and it's just drawing me deeper having no one to console me (except for me best friend).

What should I do? I know it's not nearly as bad as some of your experiences and I'm a boy so i dont want to seem less of a man for telling them how i feel.",4.2605590062111816,4.3835273850931715,5.12750931677019,86.97672981366463,70.18012422360249,7.6822360248447215,31.62795031055901,7.1686216300943375,1.7711436024844724,603,25,131,5,10,197,100,161,0.136,0.72,0.14400000000000002,0.6511,1,0,0,0,3,0,12.0,0,1,3,1,7,11,1,0,7,0,15,0,0,2,0,28,28,12,0,3,6,1,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,7,9,0,1,5,0,0,1,8,4,0,2,3,1,22,7,24,23,5,18,0,2,0,0,17,6,0,2,11,97,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26819862261373645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12037213984571947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290086792082235,0.16485452494758604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190230265392156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2329250700557603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4754213023297129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226854810244892,0.0,0.0,0.06836997236878957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358623965105657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3134058472451872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134139266700242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486238764269273,0.0,0.0,0.14317568620615675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12794595851703336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1418878988912653,0.0,0.09162679910722438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15014290345200415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127338712067924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13756469143851432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13351085432542534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230968283269676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871226818661584,0.0,0.0,0.11304778797279387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344308539244564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868261161869412,0.11818595389291014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983242186000592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208773668186394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15950943333428616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13034473329575172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741511245253147
mentalhealth,rarakul,2020/04/12,"Random Blackouts out of nowhere So recently cause of the quarantine I’v been feeling really down. I don’t know if i’m depressed or not but I’v been feeling painfully sad to the point I don’t have the energy to move. Anxiety to the point I’m affecting my perception of people. And just general feeing like no one cares about me. Im a very social person but I’m fine with being alone for a certain amount of time but for some reason I’m extremely lonely these past few weeks, being stranded in a foreign country as well doesn’t help my situation. So these few days I just blackout example of this is that Im just in my couch watching a movie and then BOOM Im at my balcony half my body on the the railing looking down to the ground floor. Im genuinely terrified of heights so it Doesn’t make sense for me to do this. I’m worried that maybe during those blackout moments I’m getting suicidal tendencies and I don’t know if I should go to a local psychologist in this country or something. Any insight on this would really soothe my anxiety.",2.430313644688645,4.816228235576922,4.044010989010989,83.7105128205128,79.14423076923076,7.423443223443223,28.173992673992675,8.418075326091056,2.341172344322345,835,38,158,18,21,278,120,208,0.17,0.7090000000000001,0.121,-0.9359999999999999,0,6,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,8,9,0,0,12,0,14,2,1,4,1,32,29,15,1,4,11,0,2,1,0,2,1,1,1,1,10,5,0,0,7,0,1,2,7,4,1,2,2,5,13,5,27,23,4,24,0,3,2,0,3,15,0,6,8,101,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423590035942029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934721948661475,0.0,0.21030108077142126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526783840197991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14014165676336046,0.14120125034033118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864528404500574,0.0,0.1183873599948632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13899990292543554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181309017529179,0.0,0.0781172406701225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09213129793036587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5938877590873755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15108024531815803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715219147338237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154252117861196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175039653159234,0.0,0.13808918820575608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460899130002403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09314115349186924,0.0,0.14625880910155487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121365748677422,0.09529203377968842,0.1200179405528598,0.0,0.0,0.25987347444508063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17611077051697446,0.14132373220176073,0.13571744398713328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15450200773734524,0.0,0.14011518629485828,0.0,0.10581740237188612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15035037396827813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014947068745422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341244247995165,0.0,0.0,0.11025584666420762,0.0,0.1235860158807746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13958935942909986,0.0,0.09764208396308073,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goingoutcircles,2020/04/12,"At a loss for what to do. Throwaway account.

40 year old male here, my mother has been living with me for a little over a year, she has some mental problems, as to what extent I don't know, but her problems are getting worse then I have ever seen them, she sometimes will talk/argue/yell at as what I can only describe the people that haunt her in her head, she would have period of this that would maybe last a week or so and it was only couple times a day, now it's not stop pretty much and this time always crying as well, she needs help but I dunno what could do to help her",2.1365289256198348,3.621180710743804,3.269495867768594,93.17333471074379,76.60330578512395,5.170578512396695,17.88512396694215,4.935628992294339,-0.5900618181818182,450,7,98,1,10,145,85,121,0.17,0.738,0.092,-0.8823,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,1,5,4,0,0,6,0,15,1,1,0,1,18,19,10,0,6,4,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,10,3,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,3,1,0,3,1,15,1,14,12,3,18,0,1,1,0,13,5,0,3,13,74,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1461190683221047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402078779080276,0.194305774469056,0.19289601292254385,0.11325196936626082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588465599029765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174739498267627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802234159301391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354113034504174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965089993164909,0.14314312016646502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17600431959527504,0.15506417358400956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1764208065998205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697052462005727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12909133004975068,0.13021034466300396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842699768882425,0.0,0.0,0.26711403078586904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12174376343570402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786554224151229,0.0,0.3360643120136257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17367978561048605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14681529178874927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411462322553532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047956751858135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14086132052469286,0.0,0.1578917574173678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895850703650482,0.2494923090602405,0.0,0.0,0.22617026499161666
mentalhealth,DrSilentz,2020/04/12,"I don’t know what I’m feeling I don’t know if I’m depressed or not. Maybe it’s ADHD i always bumped into things like I’m lack of focus. I always feel worry ( I don’t know why) i tried to find help. But i don’t want to pay because I’m still a child, 15 years old. And I don’t want to tell my parents about my mental health because I’m scared. It’s not like they are evil or anything, they really a loving parents but i still don’t feel comfortable to tell them about my mental health and if i do have ADHD, how much does the medicine cost? That’s why i come here for help. I always feel like everyone is judging me, maybe i have anxiety too. I also have a addiction to *you know*  and it really depressing after i do it. I feel like i lost to myself and think I’m the most worthless sheet of paper in the world. About that “i think people always judge me” i don’t really have a promising prove but i can feel it you know, i can feel that they judging at my bad pastor, my social skill , my body , my face and more! I do have a thought of suicide bit i would not do it because In my religion people who commits suicide goes to hell so yeah, I’m not ready for that. Please help me!",-0.3222572178477669,1.7702432834645698,1.97420472440945,95.98857742782153,88.60629921259844,4.803989501312336,17.521784776902887,6.2581,-0.30283790026246704,910,23,210,9,30,307,113,254,0.19,0.657,0.153,-0.9452,2,0,0,0,0,2,26.0,0,2,4,2,10,15,2,1,8,1,21,6,2,1,2,42,48,15,2,6,11,2,7,4,0,1,3,0,0,1,13,7,0,0,17,0,2,1,11,8,0,0,2,7,41,7,20,45,5,11,2,4,0,1,17,5,1,5,9,130,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262233352622877,0.2262667949359555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528067082581633,0.313315378443491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07201392165487756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07746605695699252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785997799939401,0.17215362862807554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277232981069036,0.10456407684509893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108998550369474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215871143076768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237920734018774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995115612704681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3331865750671757,0.13450181462257355,0.0,0.0,0.08603876503113997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20012471916094896,0.0,0.0,0.18929249569566192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25867391907906995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18396073431400708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276076294290293,0.0,0.08496157967949827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18914489539202292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18973426100845306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920092530146624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09878008771798852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20905417994226805,0.0,0.0,0.13052435165377402,0.0,0.0,0.10333325939584276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18091814627012115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424674048550603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09595998281591056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15035455327324168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059394086234196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645583447750173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06253989649991923,0.12063732889197387,0.0,0.07473361348465442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06391228839388277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11104791839001148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16988652482216798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09559986241542706,0.0,0.06687164287452227,0.0,0.0,0.06062061490522198
mentalhealth,fejfdw477x,2020/04/12,"Trouble answering questions in general? When i’m asked by a therapist for a certain thing examples 

“How would you describe your days?”

“Do you enjoy being surrounded by people?”

“Can people upset you easily?”

I just can’t answer yes or no, or good or bad. It’s always Neutral, the Middle. I don’t know how to explain. For some days it applies, for some not, for some situation it applies for some not. I don’t know why does it only apply for some situations and for some not. 

And this is just really a mess, especially if the questions are Yes or No, I can’t answer. 

This also happens when i’m supposed to choose food I want to eat: “I want a piece from everything” lol. I just can’t choose one. 

Anyone? Also how do you usually find therapist in your area? Is it better to go to multiple therapist but don’t tell each other? So i get more point of views? 

For my first therapist I went by a reference.",1.6732078800352816,4.019629122905029,4.103204939723612,82.42458688620994,81.79329608938548,7.567303734195825,23.946192296383416,8.532816995589336,1.9556189944134084,699,26,135,17,19,243,98,179,0.065,0.828,0.107,0.6265,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,6,0,2,11,8,0,1,7,3,14,2,0,3,1,41,26,16,0,4,12,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,3,2,0,12,0,0,2,11,4,0,2,1,1,16,4,20,23,9,14,0,0,1,0,11,6,0,13,6,101,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089639462299868,0.1087125306799889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135458038562133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12214153427712755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090885616464908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11555065190699958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16851884337447914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433402534984155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13368912185866055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11742116146346825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941312206994832,0.11113211592834847,0.15798433624909344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826002660978085,0.0,0.07425226952091052,0.1095842960196741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11553470740291813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14360531680863267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08853285104848704,0.0993663681281198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18115462642323865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12350791643624832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.292719206177118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369870905439586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2937155644931249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11419518693193532,0.0,0.0,0.6067859374280951,0.08679906426229929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14389419066115686,0.0,0.15412330278707165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111526771968975,0.11789267500112595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281109103208517,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jacklyolaswinem,2020/04/12,"Hello I need mental advice So ever since I was a kid I easily got lost in my daydreams easily

I used to go to school pretend I was listening and day Dream about my cartoon shows what would happen and also enter myself in the story its like  I had a TV in my head

I easily woke up when we had to write something or to when someone says my name but after that I easily fell back to daydreaming even sometimes in school I wrote automatically without paying attention even when the teacher was telling us what to write

Also at recess i spent my time alone from other kids( I'm highly introverted so I mostly prefer to be alone) walking in the playground and daydreaming


The only time I was awake was when I was doing something more entertaining like watching TV or playing video games

Well years passed and I barely finished highschool ( although  I rarely focused in class except with some fun teachers (mostly my history teacher he used to describe history in a fun way  also I had a math and physics home tutar because it was one on one I didn't daydream too much) (the rest of the stuff I crammed at  home on my own which was hard because I kept daydreaming in between)

And even at collage I still daydream the same way


Well the problem is recently I realized that I don't control what I daydream completely it depends on shows anime's and books I read

And lately Ive been daydreaming about sad scenarios like betrayel death being framed for a crime I didn't commit

Also loosing my girlfriend ( which is funny because I don't have one)

And although I know these senerios are fake It emotionally feels real so I'm emotionally down allot of time

I tried looking for other shows with a happy tune so that I can feel better but I still daydream about sad stuff allot even if less than before






What I want to ask is daydreaming excessively a medical condition? what is it and what should I do?


Also I'm a collage student in a third world country in a small town with a not so understanding father (who has a little bit of anger issues) and haven't told him or anyone about this (but they all kind of already know because as I said I daydream a lot)  so therapy is out of the question until  I graduate get a job and move away which will take sometime.",5.4889844985764,6.4519053486238525,6.268402404302435,76.89931192660552,67.76146788990826,8.674343562163871,31.777602024675737,8.841846274778883,2.7048893704523884,1796,73,319,29,29,591,230,436,0.09699999999999999,0.7829999999999999,0.12,0.8119,1,2,2,0,0,0,16.0,2,0,1,3,30,18,1,0,23,0,34,2,1,4,3,61,61,38,1,7,10,1,3,3,1,3,1,3,2,2,24,17,0,2,9,13,2,6,7,6,2,4,22,8,49,12,51,34,14,51,0,3,2,0,23,25,0,12,21,245,73,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630544144161993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18294610651569612,0.09746349647124516,0.35314801358917985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617555117569379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256743038194497,0.0,0.0829797007846618,0.06791275393400857,0.0,0.21535660726808264,0.0,0.07515395391922854,0.0,0.0,0.07811200721674706,0.09642274365103283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260201090585307,0.0,0.09905857320739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05695919881274076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986965923883646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23333853968841275,0.07989064417036988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931465662247615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04614364006747384,0.0,0.050194384167951814,0.0,0.07063770282750016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07810122876420418,0.094018456187564,0.07911751850913237,0.0,0.09064196795975762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331510168749203,0.17718465004206307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921833042334073,0.08764413409518704,0.0,0.0,0.09197185905095437,0.097076904005244,0.0,0.09962899120874563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944631175985674,0.08852000621116819,0.0,0.0,0.0741666932082971,0.0,0.09641189141941006,0.07508664451702733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08897327281769232,0.08900595152769031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387035631689088,0.06492548230684822,0.0654882820196243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17954408527918572,0.06717146408289079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451046842260776,0.0,0.0,0.09893879596538413,0.0,0.08834406403556189,0.10052768163114516,0.0,0.0,0.08720550627933445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401270045503635,0.07023573880376661,0.0,0.17876944098733613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305935179440581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483338779249317,0.13598635335158868,0.1747017997779563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106519307031706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20221091323225526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640577125552642,0.0,0.07719571563234749,0.0,0.10100180396361748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15450059249530432,0.0,0.0,0.08439370095363999,0.0,0.05996359342350147,0.0,0.0,0.09194440482004386,0.10623828192919886,0.1525605278241875,0.0,0.0,0.05209352063743471,0.14020886939616034,0.0,0.0,0.15882086734481338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513748575224417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274011001103881,0.0,0.0,0.05687528950390865
mentalhealth,TheyCallMeKo,2020/04/12,"Please help me Hello, my name's ko and I'm 16 years old. I don't know where to go for help so I have come here, sorry if this isn't what I should be using this subreddit for. Basically, ever since I was young I have always felt like my life was a movie, like I'm always being watched and I'm just some main character in something. A few years ago I realized that it was weird so I tried to live ""normally"" and I have felt very lonely since. Just a few days ago I accidentally went back to feeling like I'm in a movie and I kinda feel better?? Is it like some strange way of coping with stuff?? I feel better but I don't like it because I know it's not real so I don't know what to do.
Thank you and I'm sorry",-0.8584210526315772,1.1418713375796194,1.8377271203486456,96.60458263493128,90.4012738853503,4.833925578276903,15.269527321488436,6.339386263674448,-0.636138853503184,548,11,134,6,19,189,84,157,0.062,0.7659999999999999,0.172,0.9292,0,2,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,2,9,10,0,0,4,0,15,1,0,1,1,30,33,10,0,3,5,0,5,5,0,1,1,0,0,0,10,7,0,0,9,0,0,3,5,2,0,0,6,6,18,8,10,24,5,16,0,1,1,0,5,3,0,4,14,79,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24908201870328475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2338074452787673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080325629391325,0.0,0.08564490791985295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24851415520993603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12102465217314975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060813874046897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270864534954648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131166247284842,0.1003701951001875,0.2697959140279086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798469750186315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883426854603077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23163837720540856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09923630636929508,0.3431956447145915,0.0,0.12406032524112375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376560093546621,0.0,0.0,0.14742666043710267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15422214837774165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1599149270768018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324390799610589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816049582964893,0.0,0.31454698925259034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16083402560858018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293496145604444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538739493432596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134322251317504,0.0,0.11592371138324388,0.0,0.11151899039747304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13024097200511195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18094931915094906
mentalhealth,KiXiT,2020/04/12,"girlfriend said she got prescribed lithium for 'stress' ? Hey my girlfriend admitted she was on lithium which I know is for bipolar/major depression etc, but then said it was just for stress (it has been a stressful period don't get me wrong) but I feel something more is going on.

Been so distant for weeks hasn't wanted to see me due to dealing with the shit that's making her stressed, hasn't exactly ghosted me as she's still been texting but not nearly as much as usual, has reiterated that we are ok. Still gone to work and stuff.

My question I just wanna know, for purely stress you wouldn't get prescribed lithium just for that would you? As that's what she said it was for",3.809589883800413,5.713625789473689,4.030717703349281,87.69956937799044,73.06015037593986,6.340123034859878,27.1285030758715,6.980632752743323,1.2428406015037594,542,20,105,5,11,168,78,133,0.126,0.8059999999999999,0.068,-0.8466,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,2,0,1,6,9,1,5,2,1,16,1,1,1,2,22,31,10,1,4,7,0,1,0,2,2,0,3,0,0,10,3,0,0,5,0,0,2,5,8,0,0,11,5,16,1,19,18,3,12,0,1,1,0,17,3,1,1,7,78,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13272859785461505,0.11088633932675168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14358271243837914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06509643598287927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345260285494252,0.0,0.07316773392524825,0.0,0.10296770707017094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14150780411561714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593709331475598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464107376037817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422186103244794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36739282781123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025916710434458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215305640911135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09911281395744867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20562898985167288,0.0,0.7373745683853978,0.0,0.1473801755058253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417924586496243,0.0,0.07593608170339633,0.0,0.10327003851167983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372659122108687,0.0,0.0,0.09145548355306796,0.1407604912144421,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unlucky1108,2020/04/12,"I need some advice :) Hi, this is my first time posting, I've been a lurker for a long time, but I feel like I need help and I'm not comfortable asking someone I know and during this quarantine I can't book an appointment with a therapist, I just need reassurance and some advice. :) 

Sorry if there are any mistakes in my writing, English is not my first language.I don't really know much about mental health, so if I'm wrong about something please let me know. 

So first, I need to tell you about the story behind the problem: I'll try to cut it short so I don't bore you, but here it is: 

I'm a 17 year old female, who had a year long relationship that ended about 7 months ago, so I was 16 when it happened. I was very naive so I had sexual relations with the guy a lot, and most of the time it was unprotected, so when I missed my period, the stress began. I live in a country where teen pregnancy is not at all accepted, my parents are also very strict, and my boyfriend was not the ideal type. So I took a test and it was positive. I was 16 and pregnant. I didn't know what to do, I went home and told my mom, I knew I had to. She screamed at me, and told my father, who didn't speak to me for two months after, but it wasn't as bad as I expected. They booked an appointment for an abortion the following week, and made me go to school in the meantime. I was desperate. I knew it would be best to abort because I am young and I wouldn't be able to give the baby the life it should have, and also I didn't want anyone to know what happened to me. So I did it. I cried for two weeks without stopping, it was horrible. I feel a lot of regret. But I thought it was done, that the pain went away. But then I shut down, I didn't feel anything. I broke up with my boyfriend, because I had zero feelings left for him, even though before this I was madly in love with him. Now, I'm in a different relationship that is three months long, and I'm starting to regret it. I had feelings for him at fisrt but now, nothing. Also, I have problems with concentrating, anger, panic attacks, I also have problems with eating, I feel like I don't belong anywhere and like there is no future for me. I have been feeling like shit for 7 months, but today I researched about PTSD for the fisrt time, and I feel like I have most of the symptoms. Is it possible to get PDST because of this?",3.1196828629618807,3.98089218737271,4.4689228978760545,88.00903462321794,73.15478615071281,7.4851556590049455,25.433866744253717,7.760100539840176,1.172328670352051,1828,56,403,23,35,607,213,491,0.17,0.7040000000000001,0.126,-0.9761,2,1,1,0,0,0,67.0,0,2,1,5,28,31,5,2,26,0,50,7,1,1,1,79,93,42,0,18,15,3,8,5,0,3,4,2,1,1,24,21,1,1,17,2,0,5,16,20,0,7,34,10,65,11,52,53,9,55,0,4,0,1,26,15,1,8,39,286,89,6,0.07323755537044105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313378297676446,0.06492067393466609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23427218627896695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0498040490746853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05120940157299232,0.0,0.06026826782573647,0.0,0.06846722792810618,0.08331829215065564,0.06880909410342796,0.0,0.06115029959958676,0.13393480196222493,0.0,0.06231976541940915,0.0,0.07685829596318072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044801560376677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765176575430441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494744668007547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494030291970337,0.0,0.0,0.0648667360001024,0.0,0.0,0.0483727146023412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.296248868300923,0.20928369676079436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.186887481554024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03826359991243077,0.07025613658968165,0.04162259047714748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251669420878942,0.12952745668668014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784809661629266,0.0,0.0,0.04908958958339599,0.0,0.07346323946181822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124722552027408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957281820017911,0.0748903623624641,0.05172985124997041,0.17890085091091873,0.0,0.06467010316631426,0.1944387955541271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452790115236942,0.06609975310689216,0.06929914570151785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07380623015654504,0.0,0.0,0.08577493969783967,0.23383007187860397,0.0,0.053838030018398736,0.2172188772699501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027340960572942,0.0,0.07685049447840904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792992254573654,0.08592849131438494,0.08132163815853692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08039284297163136,0.0,0.08256433953527001,0.07014133331470919,0.0,0.0,0.2102353486248364,0.0856107830255422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0469178533250887,0.0,0.0,0.15725945215577244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412031600135975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0751772981358073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06205394300052449,0.05638184818738865,0.0,0.08198344719023687,0.05183791864282695,0.0,0.0,0.061229875650335525,0.08389337223296997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612186218899948,0.0,0.0,0.06401285146968748,0.0,0.0,0.08503444656916909,0.0,0.0,0.0719555263040794,0.058142438249810274,0.17082162998929246,0.0,0.06942063904860034,0.13996324536588267,0.08136961877569653,0.049723492657135215,0.0,0.1430848995278206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085730647579128,0.04319740767711568,0.0,0.11749349859385615,0.0,0.0,0.13578389512813666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059838988884712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05202585804704391,0.08007376977352465,0.0,0.09432516894198174
mentalhealth,BonesExchange,2020/04/12,"Mental health improved during lockdown So yes i am an essential worker so i don't feel locked as much as others, but i don't know why my mental health is significantly better because of this lockdown.

Maybe its because everything is less noisy and annoying to pass by, maybe its the free taxies to work  and sometimes empty transportation.

 Maybe it's because i don't need to worry about fake smiles and human interaction as much.
Maybe seeing people panic about things makes me feel more energetic somehow

I don't know but I hope it will last and improve more over time",5.767924528301887,7.648939141509437,5.8303301886792465,76.86172169811323,67.9622641509434,7.941509433962264,28.34433962264151,8.472884824447931,2.2005886792452842,463,16,77,7,8,146,70,106,0.147,0.636,0.218,0.8771,0,2,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,5,6,1,1,2,1,8,2,0,1,0,14,16,11,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,4,0,1,2,4,3,0,0,0,3,8,4,11,15,5,5,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,2,2,50,15,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2778184897064912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435674684383794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13653168549454942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15362589103583504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3229577422985747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15088618091897013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669773634112906,0.12383125389933294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014046493803542,0.0,0.610477392690105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3061898041825485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233504655900088,0.11264327780149636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17823988485422032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053189483583638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12105683390293287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15024812651912825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092578199176157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858303920554422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13707993878405494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.110596155324678,0.15427737192680285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CALVINKLElN,2020/04/12,"Could it be Bipolar? Hi so I’m (19F), 

So for about a year now my friends have noticed that once I’m happy I’m extremely happy and it’s uncontrollable and I have a very high self confidence which is very rare for me as I have extremely low self esteem and I seem to just have a lot more energy then usual and I get super motivated about work or some other project and this will all come out of nowhere. This will usually last a few days to a week but no longer then that, and then my mood will drop completely all of a sudden and I become extremely depressed and my self esteem will drop even lower, become suicidal at times etc etc don’t wanna go into detail. this state will usually last 2-3 weeks... I assumed it was normal until my friends started to point out that I didn’t have a very good balance with my emotions and it’s not normal to either be extremely energetic or extremely depressed and not have a emotion in between the two. I’m not trying to self diagnose myself as I know how hard bipolar can be for people with it, but I am starting to question it because I’m unsure what else describes these weeks of uncontrollable extreme emotions. I would go to the doctors but I want to go in with some idea of what maybe is happening with me :) (also I have a history of social anxiety)",4.80942312059959,5.504152231660231,5.978791732909382,79.33333863275041,69.15444015444015,9.02848058142176,30.679309561662503,9.168548406835145,2.5950824892118995,1024,40,198,19,17,343,136,259,0.13699999999999998,0.743,0.121,-0.7482,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,3,9,12,0,2,11,0,24,4,0,2,2,46,40,25,1,6,10,0,1,0,2,6,4,0,0,4,17,18,0,0,6,0,0,4,6,5,0,1,2,1,20,6,33,28,10,35,0,3,0,0,9,9,0,8,19,145,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654422456289019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322264440973855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05834771778939764,0.21142208440104696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824510460933318,0.10035663298390413,0.0,0.0,0.07642161118368851,0.0,0.0,0.06172904189001958,0.0,0.16488047577717624,0.09714994596395292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796960446676392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799586176943594,0.3230035849504073,0.0,0.0,0.21349776793024686,0.06321965894541408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479002244305863,0.0,0.05000777310873868,0.0,0.16319319657920628,0.0802822220237384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464153503804486,0.20378338675434213,0.0857429303094797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1011294389862479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805195895281336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052603129949158514,0.15604298469102304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08137450528422488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615980562467563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187563141368704,0.0,0.10897354804003184,0.0,0.10193464781069043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06635757342697526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048276376429018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10722406929869208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713644957304531,0.3994115591848457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757062992580592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13549686280707635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469800658719687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055812896160577004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498502871299983,0.0,0.09350083639868592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3162536727117671,0.23692771098144386,0.05645590501015815,0.0,0.23033332852424526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06968254632325781,0.0,0.0,0.06799405468795945,0.0,0.0,0.061638105898154785
mentalhealth,thepablolord,2020/04/12,"I dont know how I am at the moment. I've grown to not really give a shit anymore. I dont really feel anything emotionally or physically anymore and I'm so fucking board all the time, every five minutes I move to a new thing. Everyone asks me how hellish the world is and all I can reply is ""yea"" not because I dont care, but i just dont have any opinion on anything what so ever. 

If anyone could reccomend what this could be, cause this has been going on for awhile. And i can't get anymore help with my billion other problems cause no one can go outside.",2.0731034482758623,3.7486980344827607,3.9891724137931033,87.12306896551725,77.27586206896551,6.364137931034484,26.255172413793105,7.1686216300943375,1.2340889655172411,436,17,91,5,10,148,80,116,0.109,0.857,0.034,-0.847,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,6,5,3,0,5,1,16,2,1,4,3,23,26,10,0,4,6,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,2,0,0,4,8,4,0,3,1,1,10,1,7,22,2,12,1,0,0,1,3,4,2,3,4,64,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889011569913456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3889482944712221,0.09140973742609736,0.0,0.2151599654693785,0.0,0.12221527951815972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969204028634345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13328835860533456,0.26859227050046164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20875517836635687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6128602348491397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470541075683031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825313399001765,0.11014600290189548,0.12491850241565106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661012197769164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085815103198293,0.06830123988047533,0.12540851486188473,0.14859420144119095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876258334668703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718460106053683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13894572935924546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12626023787113527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08858630441697858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12509134016526385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16749848743807155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1341928800554823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685147082451641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622994930805027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheSilentSheep14,2020/04/12,Corona anxiety Hiya so my mums working front line during all this and was wondering if anyone has any ideas on how to stop over thinking about it I just keep convincing myself my mothers going to die and it's not healthy to do this for the next so many weeks thankyou,4.390471698113212,5.929360075471699,4.7171226415094365,84.84285377358493,70.88679245283019,7.564150943396226,28.34433962264151,8.07648339933343,1.8637962264150945,216,8,41,3,4,68,46,53,0.171,0.7829999999999999,0.046,-0.7475,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,1,12,7,6,1,1,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,4,1,7,6,1,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,3,28,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086833753358336,0.0,0.2347561188383313,0.0,0.0,0.21457192673541092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31848452271029404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17440233941555575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3464209565376952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727617926764387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.311119881888629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32636168487043304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25655860034480793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19663108512147606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461540810649124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327894218814329,0.22340635547225035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,captainaustismo,2020/04/12,"I want to help I want to get involved in counselling/ crisis support/ any other option there is available. 

These times of isolation and confusion are inevitably going to take a mental toll on millions of people, and I want to be in a position where I can offer assistance. 

I have completed my bachelor of psychology, but I am not sure what particular jobs are available that I can do with my qualification, what further training I need or what sort of organisations I should be looking for. 

All answers are welcome, thankyou all in advance",7.82405498281787,8.79807595876289,8.232525773195878,64.83408075601376,62.60824742268043,10.590378006872854,40.90893470790378,10.504223727775694,4.807035738831615,436,24,66,10,6,144,68,97,0.08900000000000001,0.813,0.098,-0.0369,1,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,2,0,12,0,0,0,3,18,21,4,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,0,1,11,3,14,18,2,9,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,4,1,55,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19191832408127724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.295900830188937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744756912230278,0.0,0.16039133276727355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18916517708339786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28005841111078034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2369925434450384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28440996789558026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092615141690108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19565484096616276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3202583201568397,0.2659876883530127,0.0,0.21219326288523324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16456393382401008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4993795227542024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,undercovrhoneybadger,2020/04/12,I’m so sad I’m so sad I don’t feel like myself. The only thing that excites me or brings me joy are my dreams. I wish I could live forever in my dream world. Nothing makes me feel whole. I used food for a crutch for a while and would eat all day all the time. Candy chips meat vegetables pasta anything really. I can’t even enjoy a bar of chocolate and I force myself to eat and drink water. I don’t know what to do I feel so helpless and hopeless. I feel ugly and so unlike myself. The only thing I like are dogs but I can’t afford a dog and don’t have time for one either. I don’t really know what to do with myself lately. I wish I was a different person living in a new place with new people and new everything. I’m so over my life and myself. Any advice welcome thanks. I’m 23 f btw...,-0.5759246954595802,1.5081258372093025,2.079867109634552,94.7391085271318,90.04651162790697,4.671539313399778,14.585825027685493,6.1826913282559595,-0.6436919158361021,612,11,139,6,21,211,92,172,0.068,0.767,0.16399999999999998,0.9284,2,0,1,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,0,6,11,0,0,9,0,14,9,0,2,2,27,30,16,0,4,3,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,5,10,8,0,6,4,0,1,6,4,0,1,1,4,25,7,12,27,4,14,0,4,0,0,2,5,0,1,10,87,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13548857867341976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428773111384572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11409831804897655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107018895622814,0.0,0.0,0.08941870594260568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14486124027909592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13582562223292224,0.0,0.28375006701511996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09157796589656432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246109704777522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28042532842310897,0.09905261365949536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16765786690338524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15239840647340355,0.0,0.15640485916140648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793360973326176,0.1354761762557234,0.0,0.2448635165910406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255091024820454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4017312629549709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330397923956352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395380143422064,0.21090133006641895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09612344795344896,0.12106508597439515,0.14486124027909592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17764732068756076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12765161396041164,0.0,0.0,0.18422770647948286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616975347998954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11975032356765095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15479937688645554,0.3188846177345854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849400210715256,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thatguyfrom80s,2020/04/12,"What to look out for as mental health issues in times today ? We are all going through some unprecedented times, which we have never seen before and there is a lot of talk about these lockdowns getting extended and it affecting mental health etc.  Me for one, as twist of fate would have it,  is locked down all alone in a house , separated from family , so has had no major human contact for more than a month, bar the occasional visit to the supermarket . 

I am wondering what are the tell tale signs of problems or patterns one should watch out for in us or people around us during these times which is an indicator for some mental health problems ?",13.783750000000005,8.447313875000003,12.040000000000004,62.17500000000002,56.08333333333334,15.0,42.5,11.698219412168324,4.7065,515,15,92,9,4,162,83,120,0.084,0.9159999999999999,0.0,-0.8490000000000001,0,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,4,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,7,0,12,4,0,1,3,22,17,7,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,8,7,1,0,1,1,0,2,2,2,0,2,2,3,6,0,23,13,8,15,0,0,3,0,9,7,0,6,6,73,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14868058382067775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277951570632392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221554692576584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16010273876168848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353316950741369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750020153531347,0.0,0.08158610734872529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4577795203004914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564419610765138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498350279541613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055077264311845,0.0,0.0,0.12204606434703752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4340116471027457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458492327695315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1107191344146766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19455434119751602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09952356266984136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2747271537687353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538476793430495,0.12547415506421522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511257411304527,0.0,0.1360741761795402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34536006438560285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15568021386138067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197796895573144,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mikaloen,2020/04/12,"Telling people how i feel I have struggled telling people how i feel. My family has hurt me a lot growing up and i see most of the stuff i hate about myself in them to. Sadly because of other medical issues i realy on them for help. This pits me in position i realy dont like where i have to see them often when i hate every minute of it. Another thing that makes this worse is that dont realy have people outside of the family to talk to about this. My so called friends have never even tried to listen and at this point dont realy want much to do with me. I have a pshycatrist, but i realy dont feel comfortable with him. Sadly its not easy to get a new one for a good amount of time. I am very unsure if i should tell my family how i realy feel about them. I am not stable at all and will suffer a lot if it goes badly. Maybe even fell so bad my suicidal tendencies will get the better of me. At the very least i will fall deper into my depresion. Is it worth the risk to tell them because i feel so trapped or should i wait to become stronger so that i can handle the backlash better?",3.208782751091704,3.956736917030572,4.677464519650656,87.01960289301311,72.84279475982531,7.6463973799126626,22.60944323144105,7.865858978985527,0.8962159388646289,850,19,184,11,16,285,115,229,0.23800000000000002,0.674,0.08800000000000001,-0.9905,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,5,2,15,16,2,2,11,0,21,1,0,4,2,31,36,15,1,5,6,0,5,1,1,5,1,1,0,0,14,6,0,1,5,0,1,3,7,10,0,1,0,8,35,6,30,31,7,17,0,4,2,0,15,10,0,7,5,140,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106870462164326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17019542607294305,0.1242571763628239,0.11256100591302984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18027730989842736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407021140188323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4777910191142464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346324519415105,0.0,0.08587075483990549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28823915066130035,0.0,0.2576653481986962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874200126175289,0.0,0.106496447815029,0.0,0.0,0.0854844250876229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20124689061961126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683138404030685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10910589125081316,0.0,0.0,0.10637646308738047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04979224426531123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17329497429592375,0.0,0.0,0.06803140828771083,0.0,0.10239085931045068,0.0,0.0,0.1026721937379272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749218443565172,0.0,0.07860585122146972,0.09843354862288724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906263167387891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21197242197422264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634595114273796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16243174141606118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654737346931424,0.11667232980091573,0.1114823266635578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08191825152369964,0.3563251399049924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771014074201064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05942951279240076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691959898318566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16818691735252395,0.06011418793525425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386368631647387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Delafini,2020/04/12,"I just want some help. Even a book..Im not doing good Hey, just splited with my ldr girlfriend and i feel attach to her and it sucks. in 2 weeks she is coming back from the uk and we are going to meet... i feel empty and i overthink every second that goes by..:( how can i make this stop? is there any book that you guys know that can help with this problem? thanku so much",-1.341153846153844,0.6012882179487207,0.21410256410256426,104.21423076923078,102.71794871794873,2.4000000000000004,11.128205128205128,3.1291,-2.0155179487179486,283,4,67,0,13,89,60,78,0.151,0.7659999999999999,0.083,-0.6774,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,1,0,0,7,3,1,0,2,0,6,0,0,2,0,20,14,6,0,2,3,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,1,3,1,0,2,1,2,0,1,0,2,10,1,7,14,2,6,0,0,0,0,10,1,1,1,3,46,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18985917543353106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146803307333287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24049797254237476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844027519551644,0.0,0.23523011393753815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823343026506996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586704465644633,0.2341718212531857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27644257893570223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3742711355334881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30157374714978674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15343584710660008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863618871487145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20523720814206647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671476896522768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23341583503456945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646738438905751,0.0,0.2239498512297539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SlytherClawPlays,2020/04/12,"Why do I flinch at the slightest sign of movement? For context, I am currently 19 (male) and the oldest guy of my siblings (I'm child 3/5).

When I was younger (around the age of 7-15), my dad used to try rough housing with me (because it's apparently a thing guys are supposed to do?), Or chase my older sisters and I around with a weaponized towel, despite all of my protests and attempts to fight him off/escape, or even calling for my mother to get him to stop (very seldom worked), and he would always pin me to the ground and say that I would have to push him off (like how is a 7yo supposed to do that?). Now, if I see even a hint of movement in my direction, whether it's innocent or not, I flinch, recoil, and throw my hands up in front of me to stop whatever it coming my way. Sometimes my dad makes fun of me, especially when we're in the car together (when he's driving) and he'll just randomly make sudden quick movements like moving his arm straight up or towards me stopping just before hitting my chest, and he seems to think it's funny. But now it's gotten even worse to where if I THINK I see movement, even if it's in the corner of my eye or nothing is there, I physically recoil and put my arms up like I'm defending against being hit or something. I don't think my parents physically abused me, but I wonder if I developed some form of PTSD/some other problem because of it?

If you need any clarification, please feel free to ask.",11.352696245733789,5.825814184300345,10.697750853242322,70.55147269624575,60.740614334471,13.494744027303755,44.317064846416386,9.642632912329526,4.196349078498294,1128,44,236,13,10,369,162,293,0.055,0.877,0.068,0.6818,4,0,1,0,2,0,45.0,0,1,0,2,18,9,3,0,10,0,13,5,5,4,1,53,34,27,0,9,17,5,3,3,0,3,0,1,0,4,11,14,0,3,7,0,1,12,2,4,0,0,2,7,37,6,39,26,3,43,0,0,3,0,22,16,0,15,17,152,48,1,0.0,0.15332670748099192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10767739317152944,0.0,0.0,0.08800152658230068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23040019319322225,0.12097852866332927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15777120206296386,0.0,0.11011623743553084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321395096238024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147308880569064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3418896904187401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06543231208888638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676100692090078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562675088326912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493188617689685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18966587993789025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17276100065637268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753967562981345,0.0,0.09595400955042636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1241699708827656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14369169646012248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14205055691728302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382548517159025,0.15127042355243348,0.1300902638451766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029100251849382,0.0,0.0,0.20624202035271547,0.11780771308193545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996242033369869,0.12798731045767367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32457135291914097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08597258210283623,0.2487572711967666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785918699642124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176651679054192,0.0,0.10677472681533988,0.0,0.1027176372489213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.116770126118279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033689606983568,0.09421018947056613,0.0,0.13187728162269247,0.1838547272744155,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anon09758,2020/04/12,"I am fundamentally wrong and I am confused about this world and myself, anyone else feeling this way? Since birth, I was never really appreciated or loved by  anyone else other than my closed ones, what I mean is that I was hated or perceived as a despicable human being by pretty much everyone that knows me.

Here's my story.

I was raised in a boarder line falling apart family, dad too busy and mom has severe mental health and physical health issue (depression and other surgery). So I was sent to live with family friends for 2 years between the age of 4-6 due to my mom's conditions. She later admitted that she wanted to kill herself and bring me along with her. I remembered one time I misbehaved, I was around 4, she threatened me by saying that she's gonna jump off the building because she believed that I didn't love her. 

In school, I am always being treated as the freak, creep, ugly, idiot, and fag by pretty much everyone, ""friends"" included. This is always a part of my life, even now. I guess I am just cursed and nothing really changes in the end.

I was bullied severely and nobody helped me. I reached out for authority but they blamed everything on me because bullies have more friends. One time, two teens physically bullied me severely and I kicked them back. The institution informed my mom and she doesn't let me explain so she blamed me, I was 8 or 7. She then fake abandoned me for a night and I was picked up by my busy father. When I misbehaved, she punish me by taking away things that I love, so I am scared of her for most part of my family life. I think that authority or anyone else will never help me because they didn't. I was always punished for mistakes that I was forced or didn't commit. 

I also don't believe that people will help me because I learned that people are heartless toward me in my darkest year. I was the target of everything and everyone, I was not someone's enemy but I was the arch enemy, the only foe. I am still kinda of that person now but there's less people messing around with me now since everyone is busy.

Everytime I got hurt, I don't tell anyone or rarely cry in front of people, even my family. My mother always tell me that I never deserved to cry because my family provides me with organic foods, good educations, and attentions. So I cry alone since I know that other will kick me while I am down and my closed ones think that I am just being weak when they saw my tears. 

Overall, I don't trust anyone and I think everyone is going to hurt me in someway that I don't expect, so I grew more and more paranoid. I was always harmed when communicating with others, they always end up making fun or straight up assaulting me.

I also don't know if I am depressed or not because I did have many suicidal and self harming thoughts. However, it doesn't effect my function as a person that much because I have been feeling this way since birth. 

I have felt short lived happiness in my life, it was a simple but warm feeling. So I have decided to feel happy again. The biggest problem is that people still hate me, and they always mess with me for entertainment. I was listening to music on the discord server today in a separate chat, but I still got kicked out since my existence is offensive. Despite not disturbing anyone, I was wrong fundamentally. 

I really tried to be a nice person and start to be positive about everything. But I will always end up being a tool or being attacked. Now, that kindness is fading away from my head and I can only feel my violent desire. It's taking over my mind bit by bit and I am on the edge of breaking apart. I really tried to be a friendly but I do know that the only way to stop everyone from hurting me is to hurt them. I know that because I tried. Now, that bad desire is tempting me and I don't know what to do anymore since it is very effective at making hurting stop. 

Please don't hate anyone or my mother. She loves me and she is the only person that gives me any sort of love or support, so I love her and I know that she's trying her best to help me. For the people that hate me, I believe that they are nice people of some sort because they do seem to be friendly to anyone else  and a lot of them are willing to help others. I just don't know why nice people are not being nice to me and I really just want to make people stop attacking me. 

I am so lost and I don't know how to feel about myself and everyone else. I am now so tired of living in constant paranoia and being so defensive but aggressive at the same time. I just want to be kind and to be loved like everyone else. I just want to enjoy life and stop conflicting with everyone.",4.5997488207141135,5.537477532537967,5.744300175601697,79.94519763798506,69.77006507592189,8.673924870020315,28.083944496092,8.931816317955466,2.187164803911441,3663,124,703,65,63,1221,332,922,0.237,0.622,0.141,-0.9988,1,1,0,0,0,0,88.0,0,0,10,4,43,71,17,3,26,0,89,18,2,7,4,143,146,73,2,10,30,7,8,1,5,6,8,2,0,6,41,46,1,7,32,2,0,7,21,41,0,5,29,11,150,30,95,97,16,88,0,9,1,7,68,36,0,21,42,519,191,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038448975389101775,0.0,0.05937564692380309,0.2471192549453047,0.0,0.0,0.02524540091765704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036816752306612494,0.2076621314905259,0.1521505425734688,0.0,0.06609595849713798,0.0,0.08446717599059267,0.06975790923412209,0.028545847237156592,0.030996753442905988,0.20367246249152876,0.0,0.0,0.1254771507718386,0.03895905115121805,0.0,0.08105896907448318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03927197067194238,0.0,0.0,0.040117550161161794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12233598139188168,0.0,0.0,0.0639492069472252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860726140938925,0.0,0.09864178437098786,0.0,0.0,0.049039730556053096,0.0,0.0,0.3192597266468735,0.10009321057850416,0.0,0.17498468460235014,0.0,0.11262520202589928,0.0,0.0356445905638141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04489014654371725,0.0,0.1434084602053572,0.0,0.0,0.0356124525632938,0.021098264164251212,0.031137612905225518,0.059382456380928116,0.0,0.04089596017681639,0.0,0.0,0.07903777515520605,0.0,0.14660794108565653,0.03809964433438723,0.07892155141071636,0.0,0.0,0.1244162264856879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19870853690395468,0.0,0.0,0.03874751601179624,0.0,0.0,0.04107189306299183,0.07731727802223955,0.18362001835577885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03796151633924085,0.10488631815922424,0.018136773172732927,0.0,0.09834276803708823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04052492300603957,0.031561257050723,0.23453923107084804,0.0,0.07434110907883268,0.03763762273392676,0.0,0.040438611534020286,0.0,0.0,0.03741197563532885,0.0,0.03748437187958829,0.13043654772602448,0.0,0.0,0.08187061158781407,0.0,0.08589629859162225,0.0,0.0,0.03483809403193187,0.0,0.035621208160946716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062396695412844,0.11293704003048208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804027367170614,0.0,0.2316322025416105,0.12965999272435194,0.0,0.04075069375756181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07553633380319916,0.0,0.03552238396747215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891202014634357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04205393507651886,0.0,0.0,0.029522270182554662,0.03716731748933656,0.03757118403750148,0.0,0.033796038130819606,0.0387281337208533,0.12581770174262835,0.0,0.1842547363868056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031454805355694414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02627635831200384,0.0,0.08894114621926923,0.12414836043655746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040607321507580285,0.04212755466825966,0.0,0.0,0.0558248308931133,0.0,0.06489553075539382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024663348323650684,0.07136213752691617,0.0,0.02947208492517237,0.06494141462304291,0.042668252131817255,0.035188943415298934,0.0,0.0,0.1008182692353502,0.0,0.03626447769764322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03063095483696652,0.08758612166467929,0.08840123692303177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03349838080711462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117791458639834,0.0,0.04781291382544296
mentalhealth,Dogfoodburger,2020/04/12,"When do you admit that your mental state has deviated from what is considered normal? My mind is totally preoccupied with negativity, death, suicide, suffering, guilt and fear of the future, and has been for maybe 2 weeks. The issue is, everyone thinks about these things from time to time.
How can I know when I'm thinking about these things enough for it to be a problem worth a doctor's attention?
Thanks",6.719459459459458,8.103182837837842,6.606324324324322,74.058945945946,65.21621621621621,10.244324324324324,29.664864864864867,10.355215969177356,3.1006410810810805,326,11,57,8,5,103,59,74,0.266,0.659,0.075,-0.9573,0,0,0,0,0,1,10.0,0,2,0,0,5,5,0,2,4,0,9,1,0,1,1,13,15,5,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,4,1,10,13,2,7,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,6,42,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24084112706991395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431294214742653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22484073338292865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26477968353374925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24559370539854214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12931558898615764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363920533467855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23712863864003986,0.0,0.2375875083616293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305455789572833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251518239389928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573817261555662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21663407152758005,0.0,0.0,0.3126478146623004,0.3015434894813229,0.0,0.0,0.2744124749612444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18874472596366487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rick_0427,2020/04/12,"I feel my mental health degrading I’ve been feeling isolated from the world lately, stuff I used to find enjoyable is now more of a chore. The feeling of my house (like atmosphere I guess) has changed it doesn’t feel like my house anymore. I also have trouble thinking straight and have increased sensitivity to light, also my memory seems almost like it’s blocked.

Any thoughts? I’m I overthinking?",3.908116438356164,6.892535479452058,4.1331335616438345,81.68271404109589,77.76712328767123,7.485616438356162,31.042808219178077,8.472884824447931,2.8852205479452047,322,16,55,7,8,100,53,73,0.13699999999999998,0.6679999999999999,0.196,0.3866,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,6,1,0,1,0,13,16,3,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,8,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,5,9,4,5,14,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,5,31,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906274872888332,0.0,0.0,0.3044767319010795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945774177088135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18879532270047555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20138561691551787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.385026019018104,0.1359999602215352,0.0,0.0,0.17399421196777246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097133917306747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20235380408516151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4393215299584791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21474501114657885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27901466555564003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918476120357212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17330518106996864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21792745409334585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12198104521176592,0.0,0.15113206449511787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16441806672261686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AEWExcalibur,2020/04/12,"Can someone have slow building psychosis? Is it possible that for several months someone could experience symptoms of psychosis such as delusions, false beliefs, imagining things, etc that slowly develop into the point that the person is having a full blown psychotic episode and requires intervention..?",15.872608695652175,15.124150173913048,12.619130434782608,45.55521739130435,47.26086956521739,15.286956521739132,59.95652173913044,13.816669648895859,8.860165217391303,252,17,26,7,2,75,40,46,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,6,1,0,0,0,6,6,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,5,2,5,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,22,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297970813441611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32099011774260666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28153857127038306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.229731410584702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513092009503962,0.0,0.0,0.27207846972775035,0.32446848316890825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32514934304703924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4877299055103313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29915027843111736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912116831027356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Orphanum,2020/04/12,"Could use some advice To make a long story short.
I recently broke up with my girlfriend of 7 years with whom I share a child. She cheated on me, and while have forgiven her, it has still left a mark.

I feel worthless, useless, alone and unloved, and Im not sure how to deal with these feelings. 
Usually I'm fine, but it's like a slow buildup throughout the day, until I just kinda break down crying.

To give a mental image, it's like youre lost and alone in an open field. There's a fog moving in, and it's so thick seeing anything is impossible. It chokes you, and theres no escape, and it feels like youre dying.
Then it suddenly lets go.",3.7085606060606047,4.409500007575758,4.522424242424247,88.76196969696974,71.65151515151516,7.381818181818183,25.272727272727273,7.3871296695380915,0.9855999999999998,499,14,109,5,9,161,95,132,0.20800000000000002,0.672,0.12,-0.8816,0,2,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,3,0,1,6,12,1,0,8,0,5,0,0,3,1,24,15,13,1,1,3,0,4,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,9,11,0,0,3,0,0,2,2,6,0,0,1,5,11,6,13,12,1,23,0,4,1,0,11,9,0,2,14,65,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784286710179374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37822447934041853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1502592429132534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457863919392298,0.0,0.20057085352855636,0.11775797651505596,0.18824631981566975,0.0,0.0,0.18950366710548625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2769749256369609,0.1304451370673668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17516073175522173,0.10377233590433202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1972327731266672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19838883463192944,0.186714660235808,0.0,0.2676185068945905,0.0,0.0,0.16158987842715544,0.0,0.0,0.1993228395445669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188286332896052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18401173064522652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19406844627441966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802894734209008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14550371833824793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14581974500096476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1720926141454047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157702525905497,0.2011014125806138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758450163084395
mentalhealth,skyherb,2020/04/12,"Political Climate and Quarantine help Hi all, I need some help or advice. Ever since quarantine my mental health has been getting worse and worse. I'm 21, I just moved back in with my mom with cancer to help her as much as I can. I've been dealing with anxiety my whole life, and it's been getting really bad ever since covid 19 hit my state. Seeing political posts on Reddit is not helping. Yesterday I had a panic attack because I feel so lost. I'm really scared for my country and family. Ive always classified myself as pretty left leaning, but now I don't know who or what to trust. It seems like no matter what, everything's getting worse. Maybe it's the bias posts on Reddit, but I dont remember the last time I saw some good news, other than random people surviving the virus. Am I overreacting? Are media outlets exaggerating? Should I just stop caring and stay out of politics? Or should I just keep staying informed, even if it's effecting my mental state. 

I just feel lost and scared. 
NC USA",3.5317556561085968,5.6216454153846165,4.979939668174963,79.78927601809957,74.33333333333334,8.075414781297134,24.803921568627448,8.841846274778883,2.010831070889895,796,26,146,17,17,266,125,195,0.198,0.675,0.128,-0.9011,0,2,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,4,10,11,1,3,4,0,14,3,0,1,3,41,31,16,0,4,11,1,2,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,8,10,0,2,7,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,7,4,21,4,15,21,5,20,0,2,2,0,10,5,0,8,9,90,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096786508124998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09448960988495513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687179540639574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12918897006550872,0.0,0.08731932992826301,0.0948164445111678,0.06922409103209781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578026408235573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707363004035985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13308949217108906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750041919660265,0.2054399832842187,0.0,0.0,0.10205888566407688,0.0,0.1070526671024645,0.0,0.11483698594561152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17798858819911814,0.0,0.0,0.09524732168085244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070717202452792,0.0,0.0,0.304462962718928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093584254725,0.0,0.0,0.062408676708097376,0.09256517809454444,0.0,0.0,0.12338143477428702,0.0,0.08020959182098476,0.05547885362612502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24792461704733065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408458445997598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22888013213475156,0.0,0.0,0.13299811879194678,0.0,0.1206945108084264,0.08347842315174178,0.08420204708033666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13323620786796275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07872703299481479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21751493882193146,0.11552962499476245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14549672088316126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286394269968803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273833550244383,0.0,0.09049126966683352,0.10337921937632928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878732130309357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24207609552614465,0.0,0.0949398309581622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06621676307084041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267837963700457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34717685466343584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cuechtritz,2020/04/12,"confused about the point of existence m not depressed about myself, im depressed with a seemingly pointless existence. like at the end of the day nothing matters, some people find that freeing to me thats scary as hell. one of the other things that scares me is the idea of peak creativity. let me give you some context, im a ""musician"" which is kind of a word id use to describe somebody who can play pretty much anything but averagely, sort of a jack of all trades master of none situation (again im not depress ed about myself this is just a backstory). my problem is that after 100 or soo years of contemporary popular music with the body of work of ll the collectiv artists that at some point every or melody will have been thought of. theres only 12 notes in the western scale and if you take the word understanding which has 12 letters theres only so many words you can make out of that. now as a musician and an audio engineer whos whole life was music ive had a hard time being able to listen to music even old music as it seems like everyones always just copying somebody else, hell katy perry got sued for using a common descending minor melody and had to pay up to some nobody. this has translated across to movies and comedy because nowdays all we see is reboot after reboot and even some original movies seem just likea another movie in a different package. also with standup comedy i was watching a special on netflix where one of the jokes was about masturbation and it was one that id heard before, at least a loose interpretation of another comedians joke. now i look upon the world and i cant not see the seemingly meaningless environment we live in where everything is just a repeat of something that has already been done and it literally keeps me up at night in a cold sweat. like we as a species have done it all and with the ever increasing nature of ai into our lifes (this has already had an impact on the audio engineering industry) humans are kind of coming to an obsolesces in a way.",9.562254396604004,7.346659667525778,9.520970285021225,67.45313826561555,60.5721649484536,12.737659187386296,39.06064281382656,11.326091736570909,4.348465251667679,1613,63,290,35,17,533,212,388,0.07200000000000001,0.81,0.11800000000000001,0.9486,1,0,1,0,0,0,23.0,4,3,0,2,20,19,2,2,32,0,31,4,2,4,4,60,51,19,0,2,11,0,1,3,0,1,2,4,0,1,20,19,0,1,9,6,3,2,5,8,0,3,14,10,18,12,58,34,13,40,2,3,4,0,14,22,2,14,18,205,38,3,0.09718972805767588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21450256337466456,0.0777225904140418,0.08086963945077162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20382380799394054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799788650899535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059245956141517425,0.0,0.08270130021536863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10795587801625954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08372034495504126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06267933429160688,0.0,0.25112811108771793,0.0,0.0,0.10154258004111807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989176707117015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118954667867365,0.0,0.08608125161948645,0.0,0.0,0.12838579752787824,0.08791367324510786,0.08188653764719132,0.09286895013340464,0.08734786074839708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882965070433485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09323324317690113,0.0,0.0,0.07773150397834787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706290633159422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10971537300275802,0.3149447524300768,0.0,0.0,0.0863866958959224,0.0,0.20241629162753771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09938308174451096,0.13729595833773042,0.1424459756585753,0.0,0.08582031047328875,0.0,0.08161489370995273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06487489816910533,0.09853512971947083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144563291582809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091205975969391,0.0,0.09325616529280094,0.0,0.10198427052453264,0.0,0.19757482506543966,0.1478343354494802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737912010718741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18375141502163492,0.0,0.0,0.0988768937726018,0.0,0.09299744399171674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730387267087752,0.0,0.15489526013091445,0.3539115129312059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10924532642680493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07482140091930363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307458008847717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456853674227442,0.0,0.0,0.07715778787982287,0.0566721120095201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101177934487893,0.0,0.1678814400924702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714468232271217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085088605311106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07075527955006257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06258699837874131
mentalhealth,eeyorex,2020/04/12,Vicious Cycle I cry because I miss being with my kids and grandchildren.  But I realize how fortunate I am to have such a loving family.  So then I cry because I have such a great family and other people are struggling so much right now.  I’m crying about not being able to hug my family. When people are crying because they can’t feed their kids,4.348529411764705,5.7160015000000035,6.025764705882356,76.08394117647059,70.76470588235293,8.969411764705884,25.364705882352943,9.3871,2.32392,274,8,48,6,5,94,45,68,0.24,0.585,0.174,-0.5106,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,2,0,8,6,1,1,2,0,8,3,0,1,0,7,11,8,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,10,3,4,9,1,4,0,1,0,2,5,1,0,0,3,38,11,0,0.1622993142147789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2968084666126728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7131127027050329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4590040475178848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17893556688870588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648146766712852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930867034629936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2250358181741627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13860272755103434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696704821763865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nicholasrymer,2020/04/12,"My brother is psychotic and thinks my family is trying to kill him So my brother used to do drugs (weed mdma etc,) for a few years he then became psychotic recently and stopped trusting everyone except me and thinks they have a plan to kill him on Easter  he also keeps seing the number 12 somedays he's fine and some hes completely fucked in the head and he only trusts me during his episodes wtf do i do",3.1375661375661363,5.089083814814816,4.5105114638448,83.33444444444446,75.04938271604938,7.591534391534393,25.151675485008816,8.418075326091056,1.7918416225749558,323,11,61,6,7,107,58,81,0.207,0.7,0.09300000000000001,-0.9312,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,1,1,2,6,3,0,4,0,7,3,1,1,0,12,12,8,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,11,3,7,12,3,6,0,0,0,1,11,2,1,1,4,39,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823181200958048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390360967042917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26438818639451883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542615848287279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178477623223221,0.0,0.0,0.2149223150912281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21076683799110293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339765843824289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026419849509685,0.5044593681062647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17339153250798212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22510595210860745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19060420273665768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2921649179754834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547856593620793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969043259725544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14681373621316882
mentalhealth,Eudonidano,2020/04/12,"How do I encourage my (possibly schizophrenic) friend to seek psychiatric help? I'm reaching out here because I'm really not sure what else to do. I have a friend that I knew in highschool and they randomly reach out to me now and again. It started with them messaging me when they felt suicidal and I always tried to talk them through it. I initially thought they might just be severely depressed, but over time I began to suspect it was more serious. I'm not a psychiatrist, so I can't diagnose them, but it's clear to me they have some kind of psychosis. They frequently say things that are delusional/don't make sense, and actually told me they used to take anti-psychosis medication when I had met them but stopped because it was causing memory loss and disorientation. It's clear to me my friend needs help and I've been doing my best to be there for them as a listener, but I wish there was something more I could do.",5.541104868913858,6.615839421348318,5.972528089887643,78.6623127340824,67.70786516853933,10.427715355805246,32.810861423220985,10.504223727775694,3.483953558052435,739,32,143,20,12,238,106,178,0.098,0.7190000000000001,0.183,0.9527,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,11,2,10,10,0,0,3,0,17,3,0,4,3,35,33,15,1,3,7,0,1,0,3,1,3,2,0,0,10,9,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,11,3,29,7,18,18,4,13,0,2,0,0,23,4,0,4,9,103,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.16677305530547035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14220190040553796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083572428883024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17934826205027066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17556064803179444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364491775050074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719530874816172,0.1734591827640853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276442814858334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640901197593378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3961091044230744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22910038444674324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779653126807826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11407660366630346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17216305596759476,0.0,0.1812971405518903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12671965867399498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19266327229103344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094824618153808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590597544247854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19306755405920786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13156662344471629,0.0,0.0,0.12096339764477895,0.0,0.0,0.1428794594756899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18693608606208065,0.0,0.16107055907258727,0.0,0.1284949980053236,0.13736237639804544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113537894981534,0.0,0.0,0.13567494726222015,0.0996527508034089,0.0,0.0,0.1633015960912791,0.0,0.1160294003317314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14760211610996585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965257502872301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cpt_Poodlehats,2020/04/12,"Super discouraged tonight 😔 Im overthinking the living shit out of everything it seems like, but could some of it be true?
I can't turn off my goddamn brain. I hate overthinking, but Im starting to believe that some of my overthinking could be true. Can someone please help me out?",2.6950000000000003,5.4110996111111165,3.216296296296296,88.03333333333335,80.66666666666667,7.303703703703704,27.51851851851852,8.344100000000001,2.2194296296296288,225,10,43,5,6,70,38,54,0.191,0.544,0.264,0.6261,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,1,0,6,2,2,0,2,12,10,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,5,4,7,6,2,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,3,3,26,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2621405274691052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597377716076617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37153770273489617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091096813700851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297144307008301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595445881288073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5026491873264892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136712921079837,0.0,0.20545274520052306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554028751201942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21181492903249868,0.0,0.0,0.23883342568726645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19714137315023475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16468572291064054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530792218696921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kaleigh19---19,2020/04/12,"I have bad thoughts and I don’t know what to do about them 19 year old uni student, I have a lot of childhood traumas. Sometimes when my anxiety is high I have bad thoughts pop into my head that I know aren’t mine. I’m charging the man that sexually abused me, going through that process till Covid -19. I have exams coming up and having a bit of issues with my grandma. I was studying so much I wasn’t thinking about helping around the house. She said she would kick me out if I didn’t smarten up.Sometimes in the past thoughts would pop up in my mind about hurting people and killing them. These thoughts are vary disturbing to me, I think I’m a nice person and would never do anything like that. I have talked to a few therapist and they say it’s normal. They still make me feel bad, they make my anxiety go up more. Thinking about hurting others makes me feel like I’m a horrible person and they make me thing, why would you even think of that ? 

I tried talking to one of those help lines, through text. Just to vent and get it out but the whole time it just felt like scripted responses and her just making sure I wasn’t suicidal. And then she ended the conversation too soon, warning me towards the end that she was ending it in a few minutes. I was going to leave her a bad review but then I thought, there was a real person at the end of that phone. She’s probably stressing over the virus and the fact that she’s probably over worked. She didn’t help my situation at all. 

I didn’t have a ton of anxiety today but I have an exam in a few days and the distance thing is getting to me. So I had a bad thought pop in my head just before I was about to go to sleep. I didn’t want to think about it but I know it wasn’t going to go away unless I talked about it, so here I am lol. It probably would’ve gone away on it own but I would’ve stop stressing about it, this in the first time it’s happened in about 6 months. Any comments or tips would be wonderful 

Thanks for reading, sorry for the grammar",2.5368929836995022,4.076106732530121,3.3871615875265735,92.51831856839122,75.65060240963855,6.328136073706593,24.97696669029057,6.923569853693429,0.7795584691708011,1574,53,348,15,34,500,188,415,0.152,0.78,0.068,-0.9817,1,0,0,0,1,0,33.0,0,1,6,2,24,18,1,3,24,1,35,3,3,5,4,67,75,26,2,8,12,0,3,3,0,5,0,2,0,4,26,17,0,1,18,1,0,8,10,12,0,2,22,5,56,6,55,47,11,53,0,2,0,0,31,23,0,4,25,243,82,6,0.0,0.0805392238766665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046225310432489314,0.0,0.1560019975491288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055937608311632615,0.06051213466224264,0.0,0.0,0.12772944347314294,0.0,0.2837813023788253,0.0,0.0,0.05784169271603151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07421106167073863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05855441757697726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043838232099122514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24082258885020266,0.0,0.0,0.04489682647292989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06874037431147527,0.04856133201499041,0.06526663091727218,0.0,0.0,0.05781947459617244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07102823232562078,0.0,0.2317904509641727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06011004131304596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395238596106187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13668656824025374,0.07181928769009407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07843398866770063,0.14553722214879422,0.0,0.0,0.0709482080310476,0.0,0.0,0.0752042327661716,0.0,0.11207179712719734,0.0,0.0,0.07197567821898322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962741010385563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05778988852535372,0.0,0.0,0.22686910091553136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863534202338395,0.0,0.05425697238406743,0.0,0.04996942411132433,0.0,0.0524264872421765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660103796209403,0.0,0.0,0.07132829619590945,0.0,0.046061598749951804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.064889800212717,0.04712528522002925,0.17805936516635415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21986554308102016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799336480316531,0.0773703972596447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06465976240168117,0.05405642430918719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640671410710831,0.06802406052121532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13445796651703218,0.07609241351062256,0.0,0.0,0.05428489869788008,0.056830118479626074,0.15573019651000816,0.0,0.0,0.07435358418914767,0.0,0.06406560459610493,0.0,0.0,0.16390711766386792,0.0,0.0625822194767164,0.0,0.07892417912086405,0.09031909901402944,0.2177780797293991,0.0,0.3237871989125578,0.0792735030739944,0.0,0.0644323232761897,0.0,0.0,0.046150542507435686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04009339836524298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06133683742418161,0.07589162626781612,0.0,0.0,0.0737159551419062,0.0494865876003614,0.0,0.0,0.3380122777958081,0.0,0.0,0.04377365191132962
mentalhealth,thatsmymind,2020/04/12,"Perpetual boredom and emptiness. Anyone else? does anyone else feel perpetually bored and empty? i don't mean just because of the quarantine. i know everyone's experiencing more boredom due to not being able to leave their house, but i just feel like i'm always bored. quarantine has made me realize this because everyone's talking about how bored they are. 

my everyday life isn't so different from quarantine life - i stay at home and go on my computer, smoke, make music, and do school work. i leave the house to go to the gym or get food or go to school, and sometimes i hang out with a friend. i even take online classes when i can so as to not have to go into class lol. but overall, my quarantine life isn't much different from my usual life; only now all my classes are online and i have to work out at home and can't hang out with friends, all of which i'm okay with. 

i've become even more aware of my perpetual boredom because i've seen everyone talking about how bored they are in quarantine. i honestly don't feel much more bored than i usually do. 

anyway, i'm always bored and i want to know who else experiences this, and what you do to help it. it's been a problem for awhile now - for example, i've always hated school because i find it so boring. i hated school so much that i walked out freshman year of high school and refused to go back, and then i did online school the rest of high school.

 i even feel bored with friends a lot. i feel like i just end up acting and putting on a good face while sitting through the boredom and emptiness (this isn't always, sometimes i do actually have fun). but most of the time i'm just waiting to get back home to my room. and then i get to my room and i'm still bored, but i prefer my room. however, constant boredom at home has caused some unhealthy coping mechanisms. i smoke when i'm bored (multiple times a day, i'm a stoner), i eat when i'm bored, and i find things to obsess over (for example, i currently am obsessing over my spotify playlists. i've been making, deleting, re-making, renaming, and editing playlists and their songs for like a week now. however, a lot of times i'll obsess over something that i can research on the computer). other things i do to try to help boredom is play video games, make music, make tiktoks, and excessively walk around my block. i always try to watch a movie or tv show to cure the boredom but i can never pay attention to it because i get bored, so i end up on my phone or searching something on a different tab.

i know this is long but i want to see who relates.

(i made this account as an attempt to cure my boredom. we'll see if it helps lol)",4.023286240175107,5.159751551984879,4.98514625410407,84.11647373395684,71.28733459357278,8.21492388817033,29.043925977514682,8.611707548084741,2.079518714555766,2077,80,423,35,38,679,208,529,0.174,0.73,0.096,-0.9893,6,5,4,0,0,0,66.0,1,1,4,3,27,29,2,3,19,3,30,7,1,9,3,82,71,45,0,5,17,0,5,3,3,1,4,1,7,0,19,29,2,3,14,7,2,11,9,18,0,0,6,11,55,11,65,63,13,66,0,0,4,0,19,25,0,9,31,260,74,17,0.06173789566338565,0.0,0.060247280368947824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25685437455820914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863371442508261,0.12651553990821235,0.0,0.05495981633439378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494526182454696,0.0,0.1881742408298489,0.06818465526009047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06342182533234883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06671673242286831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03981583525420795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19350888218092147,0.0,0.0,0.05402724853936585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317328014619256,0.15472226937905262,0.0,0.10936290155897338,0.0,0.0,0.12233189346511447,0.0,0.0,0.17697961507727894,0.0,0.06039150853216331,0.0,0.0,0.15608267531807427,0.08821112999547509,0.0,0.0,0.1128546363201,0.0,0.07465370849788196,0.0,0.14309563512617982,0.0,0.12902200938578146,0.0,0.1754353442793297,0.051782817747827836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190678066315065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12414483025253957,0.13045895282809952,0.2477125726028032,0.0,0.0,0.14247448501401094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178859861341953,0.0,0.0,0.13074303451823194,0.0,0.0,0.17442920605414522,0.09048605195869497,0.0,0.0,0.05463609488381889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497470224993782,0.0,0.11683577927312523,0.16484209903170588,0.0,0.0,0.06725066746172959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615337089772564,0.0,0.047616071156143115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04695445166813144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05907482826492697,0.0,0.06206363726290539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4373743250820217,0.09839421922284217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950576966447122,0.12212071488998574,0.0,0.0,0.06580438228876777,0.04930396322687074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04641921416294994,0.09924516388861207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08203182916956804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10799959033297632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383195714706577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13599113961803655,0.0,0.07282922087197027,0.0,0.04952241592870876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898918466754666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039757180650800736
mentalhealth,thatspringflower,2020/04/12,"When and how often do you feel lonely? And how do you cope with the feeling of loneliness? (sending all my love and positive energy to everyone reading this no matter what you're going through, I know it will get much better, you deserve it)",5.79340579710145,6.683754717391306,6.5508695652173925,75.40644927536233,67.04347826086956,9.611594202898553,32.72463768115942,9.725611199111238,3.28112463768116,191,8,33,4,3,63,38,46,0.133,0.598,0.26899999999999996,0.7882,0,2,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,1,4,3,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,2,1,12,9,6,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,0,2,5,2,4,8,2,3,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,27,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3619259541500454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3910316970494022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4138325651775452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21380299334820024,0.0,0.23257180336629474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22489916953828773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36934123046899575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008272091556235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4093353993687706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dutc46jzd25h,2020/04/12,"Not able to get a diagnosis? Anyone can relate? It may be because I don't always say the truth, perhaps spin things about a little bit. I don't know. But how am I supposed to trust a shrink when I tell him something and he's right away going to call cops on me cause they are supposed to? I can't tell everything I want to.

The other shrink told me I for sure have a psychopathic tendencies, but the other said I'm also not psychopath because I certainly have emotions and I can see other people point of view, while they may be supressed, I do have them. I'm aware of it myself too..

I can also mimic or not mimic any disorder I want to. I don't understand this.

There was a time, I was ultra raged, drunk and I was sent to a mental hospital, I was released after about 7 days with results ""Had a good behaviour, cooperated, alcohol intoxication was cause of that, we see no problems here."" and that was only because I lied straight to their eyes, to the doctors here, I just think they believed me so they've released me. Average patients are locked up here for more than 6 weeks.

It's scary, I wasn't 100% realising that back then, but now I do. I sometimes tend do things and then lie about them just for the joy of it, and there is absolutely no purpose. People believe me cause ""Why would he lie? He'd never"".

Anyone has similar experience? Odd.",2.404795539033458,4.487972780669147,4.091158364312271,84.895756133829,77.69888475836431,6.831881040892194,24.88639405204461,7.839951260653429,1.4141835241635683,1054,38,211,17,25,353,150,269,0.125,0.8,0.075,-0.9205,0,0,2,0,0,0,40.0,1,0,6,0,18,8,1,0,12,0,32,5,1,5,4,35,47,18,0,4,9,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,13,8,2,0,3,1,0,2,11,2,0,0,11,6,36,6,25,30,2,20,0,0,4,0,18,7,0,3,11,152,49,1,0.12704056999692054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13576773382228485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20318859585608728,0.10570793124531312,0.0,0.0,0.08639194400467769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17765944076445397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11935879743194372,0.09768635658123632,0.0,0.2323282569665496,0.0,0.0,0.28626243696702697,0.0,0.0,0.1386953992174819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972262595409462,0.0,0.0,0.3915169809672559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08193065784388083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559949949529366,0.13003140656172313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14290354205328773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141758726899906,0.1242700546311297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637345441722997,0.0,0.07220008358033443,0.10655560271439844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06981817487237756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273280258921614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12802701429594324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0979815193843395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662007814999042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17614787067267682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009440178820192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1215606682833115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10849195263948873,0.1208446740648743,0.1010277602966637,0.0,0.0,0.2024697725790017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780203742432153,0.12564637214591798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973423375870802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22207811543418907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168800219437548,0.08140246758063925,0.0,0.0,0.07407837799840561,0.0,0.0,0.12139270883608075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13225371369312985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498636393837098,0.0,0.1019042822824766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11463435452560047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024597595379202,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rainywriter,2020/04/12,"Felt like my boyfriend was going to kill me. I'm a 22 year old female diagnosed with Borderline Personality Disorder, Bipolar Type 1, and PTSD.

I have a concern about some odd experiences... After I go through a high stress period or break down, I will start to become numb and fixated on the room and start to feel removed from my body. I will no longer feel like I'm in my body anymore and I even sort of feel possessed by an evil entity like I'm going to kill someone even though I never would. But like... Boyfriend was worried and was going to hug me and I got super scared and started backing away from him. I knew who he was but I felt like I didn't know him and I felt scared of him like he might kill me. I felt so removed from myself and felt like I didn't recognize my own hands. And... Sometimes when I'm like this, I snap out of it so fast and will be giggly and outgoing... But other times I don't. What is this experience???

And not this time, but there are times I might think I hear or see something that isn't there vaguely. I often get paranoid and feel like someone is watching me or out to get me.",2.147751091703057,3.9021002270742393,3.458032751091704,90.66390502183408,77.29694323144105,6.501397379912664,23.677074235807858,7.365786028017652,0.8416670742358079,868,28,190,11,20,283,121,229,0.14300000000000002,0.733,0.124,-0.6747,0,0,1,0,0,2,30.0,0,0,0,1,11,19,4,3,5,0,19,7,3,0,1,44,47,25,3,1,8,0,10,9,0,6,3,1,1,1,8,17,0,0,12,0,0,6,7,8,0,0,13,13,31,11,23,27,2,29,0,0,2,1,8,8,0,8,23,122,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09237246387557507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751056987727923,0.07162093551196635,0.0,0.0,0.10286872042783793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069209357690576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09453781197226667,0.0,0.0,0.10674952704633901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12303966144355842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822227357082997,0.0,0.0,0.18838285569887533,0.13308223141284173,0.4471576725174937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732636296184613,0.0,0.21174041948285616,0.0,0.07449467244161298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10497851691828286,0.0,0.0,0.09841030576887938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3091455699296937,0.0,0.05118875526839161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40954307150421415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1976192290484251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718373407176309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977375251743248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813285545550849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887875371450456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865040492188738,0.0,0.07422261937338212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15783890155407718,0.07170574950741603,0.09212044579932499,0.0,0.1977805053588038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066945715343776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059682038363868616,0.0915121641221526,0.0,0.16293665520351605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459086517685122,0.0,0.06616585417049446,0.0,0.0,0.059980801923333535
mentalhealth,Masonbysy,2020/04/12,"I used to hide when I heard someone coming to my bedroom. Hi! I want to start off by telling you that I had a pretty rough childhood full of secrets and dealing with my mother who had really bad bipolar, she would go to the mental hospital a lot and abuse us kids (5 of us) when she was home. That only really started when I was 13 (I’m 18 now). My father was always manipulative and made me hate my mum and over the years I’ve had to re build a relationship with her. I’m not sure if it is relevant but I thought I might as well share.

So, when I was a child, from as young as I can remember, if I was ever In a room alone and I heard someone call my name or coming down the hall way my body would slightly shake and I’d do anything I could to find a hiding spot in time, before whoever got there. I would come out like it was nothing and I was fine. This continued on until sort of recently, I still get the urge to do it but I can control it. I have really bad anxiety these days, I’ll cry just because I spoke to loud or I did something slightly embarrassing. I think the hiding thing could be early stages of anxiety, I just find it strange because I was doing that before any of the serious stuff (I can remember happening) actrually happened to me! 

Could it be a sign of something happening early on in my life? I’ve tried searching online for similar things but I can’t find anything. I’d love to know if someone has experienced a similar thing like this.",3.6221483942414174,4.462773451827246,5.2890365448505,82.67204872646734,71.95681063122925,8.656921373200444,28.619047619047624,8.976282227363876,2.181367220376523,1143,43,240,22,21,390,165,301,0.14300000000000002,0.787,0.069,-0.9534,0,1,2,0,1,0,28.0,2,1,0,1,12,13,1,2,14,0,31,4,1,4,2,51,55,24,0,10,11,3,1,2,0,4,2,4,3,2,17,13,0,1,9,0,0,5,2,6,1,0,18,6,39,7,34,28,2,38,0,0,0,1,24,12,0,8,21,165,56,0,0.0,0.11485263880840417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003958758793846,0.0,0.0,0.08065804678740232,0.0,0.0,0.06591941947490237,0.0,0.14831068404083586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15953920621485485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618740775183282,0.11818188222134587,0.0,0.16496983014771094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076734151301756,0.0,0.0,0.09898191659156108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505038805527931,0.0,0.0,0.10872133230848294,0.23218517006977016,0.0,0.10647902299180084,0.06251533594351172,0.0999361764839914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08768365010669836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657916928260949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05064476363086348,0.0,0.05509064126855831,0.0,0.07752812213979655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571590536155761,0.0,0.0,0.0957036729016432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723414437261588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05327317968600346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06846836406428566,0.0947155137360754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08241103991446992,0.08748801419150955,0.0917226518651204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09768811845508013,0.10283317735806527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301216370550656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372376596737089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861818574025344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862979644221633,0.0,0.09571204712867502,0.10407237951179782,0.2196179015672084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2463992370935015,0.14925126653302018,0.0,0.0,0.13722279883702262,0.0,0.07741276315806095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109678808309634,0.0,0.0,0.09136049977320726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08472584230023494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931987860805079,0.06211231230599185,0.0,0.07695590714994632,0.0565238313543781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06581279697374956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332027845651434,0.0837210920048546,0.0,0.0,0.05717503074149699,0.07694283588308043,0.0,0.0,0.08715659703661455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20658045423186205,0.0,0.0,0.06242324162442426
mentalhealth,Amiebxker,2020/04/12,Why do I hate my mother and sister? I genuinely cannot stand anything about my two closest female relatives. This feels weird because other girls my age (16) might be going through a rebellious phase or fight a lot or say they hate their parents but at some point they loved their family. I can’t remember a time I actually loved my mother or sister. Especially not my sister. Since she was born I’ve absolutely despised her and honestly been quite awful to her. I hate my mother as well. Just being stuck in a room with these two starts to make me legitimately upset and tense. Their very presence annoys me knowing they think I love them makes me extremely angry. I don’t feel this amount of rage towards any of my family members. Even my shitty bio dad. I want a good relationship with the closest family I have but no matter what I can’t seem to stop despising everything about these two. I’m sorry if this sounds like some serious teen angst but I’m actually rather concerned and it’s really upsetting knowing I’ll probably never feel close to the two women who should be the most important people in my life. Also I’m not allowed to get therapy my mom thinks it’s embarassing so I have nowhere to vent this sort of thing.,3.5515535097813604,5.91486235443038,4.8425872650556245,79.53106156501727,75.24472573839662,8.359723820483316,25.54065976217875,9.095868883498916,2.331347679324895,986,35,179,24,22,326,150,237,0.243,0.632,0.125,-0.9854,2,0,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,7,1,8,19,8,2,8,1,14,4,0,3,1,41,38,14,0,4,11,9,3,1,0,2,1,2,1,2,12,7,0,1,9,0,0,1,8,12,1,4,3,5,34,7,19,30,5,17,0,0,0,3,28,9,0,11,7,116,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.22322301942389888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914640141753911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07777753429311578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411920023959464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697206943759217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07554226089514929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279104094603242,0.0,0.3234619410914652,0.0,0.17349121413064575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05975515062850241,0.0,0.06500078845697964,0.09593061181484712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3387588556018171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12571277456437552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08078500351525435,0.05587685067905093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09723579992265262,0.3096781833739053,0.0,0.15268967681483978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133163553544515,0.0,0.13395222753544395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821147702839546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12699763609908707,0.0,0.0,0.07929180903234241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811941508096344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233133944503808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12164972058822568,0.0,0.0,0.07327024637051603,0.0,0.0,0.12279375532921445,0.12956226713304936,0.0,0.0,0.0909539677751086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412084653616276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09461049377361072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280311640072567,0.08095376921824493,0.0,0.0,0.09562091519939893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079544658312964,0.0,0.0759843120052866,0.14657114819535969,0.0,0.0,0.06669179229069579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4469030485117204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09436966947103444,0.06746013465576438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10283502598907862,0.0,0.10320380613036473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jhannah123,2020/04/12,"Blurry thoughts and insomnia I didn’t know where else to post this, since I was 11 I’ve had insomnia, and when my insomnia gets bad at night, I have all these racing thoughts however I can’t pinpoint any, although I know they’re negative, from ages 14-17 I smoked cannabis and it greatly helped my insomnia but I stopped smoking it, while I was 17 I got diagnosed with depression and anxiety, so when I stopped smoking it it made my insomnia a lot worse, currently I’m 18 and I got put on sleeping tablets, my doctor is trying to cut my tablets down so I’m taking them on alternating days but the days I’m not taking it the insomnia and the thoughts come back worse than before, I can’t speak to my doctor because he’s currently filling it at the hospital due to the Coronavirus outbreak and the doctor that I’m speaking to isn’t any help, she has increased my anxiety medication which is making it worse, does anyone have any solutions or reasons why this could be happening? It’s currently coming up for half past 5 in the morning where I am and there’s no signs of me sleeping any time soon. 
Thank you for reading I hope you can help!",4.597544247787614,5.780027548672571,5.4258296460177,81.32024889380534,69.97345132743361,9.366814159292037,33.59402654867257,9.673873057562805,3.2343548672566382,910,44,178,21,16,297,129,226,0.162,0.757,0.081,-0.9512,4,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,2,1,0,9,6,1,0,8,0,16,13,2,3,1,30,37,17,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,11,2,0,0,13,11,0,2,6,1,0,5,7,3,0,1,10,2,26,3,18,25,3,32,0,1,0,0,10,9,0,3,17,109,39,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085907559771084,0.0,0.17357292612789424,0.0,0.0,0.07932461435438459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723355798204081,0.0947233083065465,0.06915609365948669,0.0,0.09653483943771618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19544868186735545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057800888980748,0.0,0.0,0.14632755364537253,0.0,0.09771153060882076,0.11514607625866766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3483527067883456,0.09927802667558527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09477021319176593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05927125124744309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18146747962270984,0.12507545654602634,0.0,0.0,0.10032059772588722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281229213526833,0.0,0.0,0.11267823322967345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12469474794804003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09644838088170828,0.0,0.10734607003805292,0.07572659513192218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428567836810112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10646210184164892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829777191053644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086506392300053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404533087190401,0.0,0.0,0.11347746315668268,0.0,0.0,0.11664216674300615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384433455725473,0.0,0.2270573854937331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18969314710724425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17059569408096836,0.0,0.0,0.10444653718037364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2701921727331163,0.06615171973340545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702290513507062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236805795829622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34683583012130703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,InsignificantGirl00,2020/04/12,"I am a product of my past. I don't know who to be.

I come from a place of tears. I come from a place of being alone. I come from a place where I was never good enough, to anyone. I come from a place of abuse, emotionally, mentally, physically. I come from a place of being afraid. I come from a place of not knowing who I am supposed to be. I come from a place of insecurity. I come from a place of hurt. I don't want to hurt anyone else.

My logic is irrational.  Anything that happens is my fault. Nobody truly loves me. I don't feel like I belong in my world, yet I am nothing without my people. I love my husband. I love my kids. I despise myself. 

I want to be different. I want to be better. I want to be enough for my husband, I don't believe I am. I also know, these thoughts about myself will eventually come between us. Nobody wants to be or deserves to be around this, these fears, these anxieties, this sadness. 

I appear happy. I smile as much as I can, but inside I am anger. I am hurt. I want pain. Pain is all I know. As a child I self harmed. As an adult I do the same. 

I don't want to kill myself. I just don't want to exist.

 Some days I wish I had just let him kill me.",-1.0223419231686959,1.0272538858267737,1.7669362920544032,96.1036781197805,92.81889763779527,4.338630398472918,16.752087807205918,5.941861826196648,-0.5334603674540683,893,23,212,8,33,309,109,254,0.24600000000000002,0.6579999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.9754,1,1,0,0,1,2,44.0,1,0,0,1,7,22,4,3,12,0,30,5,0,0,2,37,59,7,2,9,6,2,1,1,0,1,2,0,0,4,8,10,0,0,7,0,0,10,9,15,0,0,3,1,53,7,37,45,6,26,0,4,0,3,13,12,0,3,5,155,61,0,0.0,0.08026222511332244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07015943624702085,0.0,0.05417259982637864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05182181982363546,0.0,0.0,0.0947324208758998,0.06940884759349561,0.055745221949051404,0.06030401511921825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763211162408065,0.0,0.05991157171721506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5251772809390051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0436874591527971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07077511859295546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056589066304643686,0.07619971352041707,0.0,0.13998950145751454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622766440443207,0.034251977681151416,0.04839431489877023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056818090609712324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05990330469072923,0.07211174928577976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21755501339996808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149891165303417,0.0,0.14891513106959134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06926994954976427,0.0,0.033094920430563925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341718821464287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0682671798896868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049797564140274114,0.0,0.05224617668747344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06499949238486544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441627903209572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466662455311427,0.04696320710330722,0.0,0.5662009487436437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066882800534835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053778932792068884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08148430278143318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3196440402829905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789901768807156,0.06530008337022182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,endoftheworld12,2020/04/12,"I want to vent Sooooo, I’ve had a on and off relationship for about half a year now and I feel like she is narcissistic but at the same time she has told me she went to see a counselor and that she’s better and I’ve seen some change but I feel like she wants to change me and make me obey her blindly, what should I do?",2.188169014084508,2.736470633802817,3.2437746478873244,97.09805633802816,75.05633802816901,6.806760563380282,19.833802816901407,6.742157984588678,-0.26470366197183104,249,4,66,2,5,80,47,71,0.0,0.851,0.149,0.8402,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,4,0,5,1,0,2,0,16,14,7,0,3,2,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,4,5,13,3,8,9,2,7,0,0,3,0,8,3,0,1,5,43,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22515660962303446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5386268486228056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25744806709372003,0.363746086284218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2487512801387161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993509883824826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27332520945596345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028684597801668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484484943715309,0.0,0.0,0.24326349120097746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003174776319833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359995603945148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639421109803857
mentalhealth,sasachumonster,2020/04/12,"Control freak? My friend is a nice and well mannered guy, but the only problem he has is.....every time when he’s playing online games, if he lose, he lose control!!! Start to punching the wall/ kicking stuff around him/ yelling at ppl around him. Why is that? How to improve this problem ?",2.520555555555553,5.1933273518518535,2.5607407407407408,92.73333333333336,81.03703703703705,3.6,27.51851851851852,3.1291,0.5488740740740741,223,10,41,0,6,67,43,54,0.25,0.584,0.165,-0.8388,0,0,0,0,1,0,17.0,0,0,0,4,5,9,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,3,0,10,4,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,3,3,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,3,4,5,4,0,7,0,2,0,0,9,4,0,1,3,23,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3671938553239617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4626303916115598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17376571860008988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1593401671939086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2042095825927273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4614586119660542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15685447370985997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39468679828219705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14597741725579644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23609494601975156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025994199862003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18543412669085665,0.0,0.18609911824196088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lilboyeeyee,2020/04/12,"I'm supposed to go back to work tomorrow and I don't think I can do it. I don't really know where to start. Back in January I guess. Things were going decent at my job but there was definitely something wrong. I was going through almost full day crying spells. It was getting hard but I powered through.

Not long after that my boyfriend was fired. I thought not having him there would make it easier to focus but the crying and anxiety attacks got worse. Then one morning I accidentally bumped into a girl and she called me a fat ass. I just launched into a panic attack I couldn't come back from. My boss was trying to understand what was wrong but pretty much gave me the ultimatum of taking a (minimum 30 day) person leave or getting back to work.

The leave system shit out and pretty much autofired me for missing work. It took until the beginning of March to get it sorted out and hired back on. At that same time, my job lifted their missed time penalty.

Since then I've managed to work through one full shift, one half shift, and maybe five 1-3 hours shifts. I don't know what's wrong. It's just like I walk in and my flight or flight kicks in. I can feel the anxiety creeping in the more I look around. If I manage to pull myself through getting there I get to my station and start checking the clock. I've tried covering it up. I've tried swearing to myself I won't look. I do though. I start checking every 30 seconds and freaking out because it's not moving. Then I start to feel like I'm stuck there. I spend the rest of the time trying to calm myself down until I finally just say ""okay okay you'll leave in an hour"". Then I immediately clock out and leave because I feel like I can't take another second.

I lost my insurance. So I can't even get into counseling. I can't even try to go back to my old job. I was miserable there but at least I could do it. Unfortunately, they're bare bones in the current pandemic and have been on a hiring freeze since Christmas.

I'm supposed to go back tomorrow and I'm awake because I could feel the panic setting in just laying in bed thinking about it. I feel like trash every time my boyfriend comes home and says ""I thought you said you were going to work today."" Money has been rough the last few months but my boyfriend just got a raise and I'm doing driving apps. So it's a little better financially now. I can't keep doing this though. I feel like a burden. I feel like garbage. I feel so out of control of my life. What the fuck is wrong with me why can't I do this?",1.5632163742690075,3.8591391130604333,2.8592495126705657,91.48372807017543,81.84600389863547,5.5933723196881076,21.390838206627677,6.857409640812818,0.4651153996101369,1987,61,417,23,54,641,229,513,0.2,0.71,0.09,-0.9962,5,0,1,0,0,0,51.0,0,3,1,9,28,26,4,3,22,2,37,6,4,4,0,71,93,34,0,5,17,0,12,6,0,3,2,3,2,2,19,26,1,2,15,0,4,13,13,16,0,7,20,17,62,10,57,67,9,83,0,4,2,2,13,28,3,6,46,268,81,13,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06074265249519835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06360774389437991,0.09281011701585423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05400063832945354,0.0,0.13801997959000184,0.0,0.32650885326666085,0.0,0.11093409475911682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536492157222779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06194107539000284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450716848166666,0.0,0.0,0.06803582384456924,0.09686482554234167,0.0,0.1332652552648448,0.07824191064488953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08013127621550245,0.0,0.10221804736794814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2453738650962781,0.21667909598421886,0.0,0.06645052969567608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056079584739871055,0.19015540798907746,0.0,0.2068483020901801,0.0,0.09703136539823087,0.0,0.06682429621592137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05433982519652529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06084735146035865,0.0,0.11947659752686107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18058833300049293,0.0539177722417282,0.0,0.0,0.06667476550918272,0.049446341993730485,0.0,0.2569225223809941,0.0,0.0,0.04284625158185365,0.17781371524066697,0.06079768115268916,0.0,0.05368256657925664,0.10187895728499084,0.0,0.0662180187816734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04049130421542418,0.0,0.06094154946322165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048418571893338466,0.0644724310053608,0.08918478298701936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365291105710752,0.0,0.12331522010532753,0.0,0.0,0.14234387565177348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052966342663829366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12342691853439294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0388606210664178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05770195454863464,0.0964792081719536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062267053767579884,0.10035785955600228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046699358179347464,0.0,0.0,0.17174304197532336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09121817948952053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04030009044732938,0.07773750098350496,0.1191971176499773,0.09631520202119996,0.14148632476780465,0.0,0.0574989893413058,0.0,0.06739596331595889,0.20592223101717172,0.0,0.0,0.06314964093752555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05473659775024317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208075565406684,0.0,0.06181815466453351,0.043091424946765586,0.26529060508951896,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,esoraven,2020/04/12,"Abnormal forgetfulness? Today my mother has been trying to instigate arguments, all day. Before, I came outside she tried one more time and when I failed to let it escalate, she said talk to [spouse]. Then she stormed upstairs. Is it abnormal that I’ve totally forgotten what she’s been trying to get me to fight about? I’m really concerned that there may be a problem I’m unaware of.",3.0874999999999986,5.901087194444448,4.472777777777782,79.02500000000003,79.83333333333334,8.6,28.44444444444445,9.188382445141503,3.1634111111111105,306,14,53,9,8,101,55,72,0.21,0.79,0.0,-0.9281,0,0,0,0,1,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,1,0,1,0,7,0,0,0,2,7,12,3,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,4,1,8,0,7,5,3,6,0,1,0,0,9,0,0,1,5,36,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24077627251413655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32362837671155376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18248439184268184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14783378752927712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28934355217022656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19173954862460887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707524290350473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18127003145717152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26915769303569337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274307855142463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649949861685504,0.0,0.2682109374639199,0.0,0.0,0.5763293782219711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pleeplow,2020/04/12,Is it Normal Is it normal to write your goodbye letter and give it to close friends so they can share it if I die and so I am seeing if anybody else has done this if you have you can message me or comment,2.8166666666666664,3.1328475555555566,4.157777777777781,91.97000000000004,73.44444444444444,6.0,26.11111111111111,3.1291,0.3854444444444445,160,5,37,0,3,53,32,45,0.079,0.809,0.11199999999999999,0.1689,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,3,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,0,10,10,8,1,5,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,7,2,2,9,0,1,0,0,1,0,11,1,0,4,0,30,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3495728685121289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34469059077219594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.281375432449728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602314222567143,0.0,0.0,0.3231147997588471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6600371734286692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684072185809941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Quasisotropic,2020/04/12,I'm bleeding. I'm bleeding. I talked to family. Made it worse. I'm bleeding and should get stitches.  I'm just so fed up with life. Im not looking for kind words or help. I'm just fucking miserable.,-1.535,0.1229772857142848,1.0670238095238105,96.76339285714286,109.4761904761905,4.0047619047619065,21.91666666666667,5.985473137389443,0.4387523809523812,154,7,34,2,8,52,29,42,0.218,0.72,0.063,-0.7697,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,3,1,1,0,0,1,6,0,1,0,9,11,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,1,1,4,8,0,1,0,1,1,1,2,1,1,1,0,13,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3233325398462249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3170809741840647,0.17919373657759718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22989334523257096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37047899762701664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35716257016632164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2422580562022349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28801817251879924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245374948596006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27567562835393683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3495275650526605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cieuxrouges,2020/04/12,"I’m having a really hard time coping with what’s going on. Please remove if this is not the right place to post this. Also, on mobile so I’m sorry for formatting and everything. 

I’ve(32F) struggled with mental health (bipolar/panic disorder) for my entire life. These past few years I’ve made a tremendous amount of life changes and developed a solid set of coping skills. The frequency of panic attacks went way down, I weaned off meds, things were fantastic. Then out of nowhere, **BAM** ... global pandemic. Now my usual coping skills aren’t helping. I’m in contact with my doctor and therapist but I can’t shake this heartache. I find myself crying every night thinking of all the people around the world who are dying scared and alone. I’m scared for the healthcare workers who are going in every day knowing they’ll probably get sick but are going in anyway and holding the hands of people who are literally dying and can’t have their families around them. I’m heartbroken for the people who are losing loved ones, whole families in some cases. I’m a teacher and I can’t stop crying for my students who’ve lost family already. I can’t stop crying over the people who have no one or nothing to help them cope with this. I think about that mass grave in New York and I can’t stop crying. I could go on and on. 

I’m crying nightly. It feels very different from a panic attack, it feels like sorrow, like grieving hundreds of thousands of people and it’s so heavy and so painful, I really haven’t figured out a good way to cope with it. I cry for all you too, for your losses and your struggles, and for all the hardships we have ahead of us when we begin to recover. 

I really don’t know what else to say, I’m sure you guys are feeling this too. Any suggestions of favorite coping skills that have helped you?",3.716239316239317,5.759330866096871,4.403769230769231,84.3287307692308,73.67236467236468,6.9592022792022785,24.52051282051282,7.793537801064563,1.3871374358974362,1438,45,264,20,30,459,186,351,0.266,0.6579999999999999,0.076,-0.9977,2,1,0,0,0,0,44.0,3,5,4,8,12,21,2,7,15,0,23,8,1,1,4,49,48,23,4,2,5,0,5,2,0,1,6,1,0,1,20,24,0,4,9,0,0,7,10,16,0,3,4,6,28,5,47,42,7,48,0,6,0,1,25,21,0,3,18,170,48,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794488354984339,0.08465182939087908,0.061345275879567826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05216569971764344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657703178324168,0.0,0.17453829919733102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114942741748211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06124700913747715,0.0,0.5055766070633977,0.04947185925717172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15922655985111775,0.08014603673091282,0.08791675956845488,0.07851634069253477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408169250417138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292636340613275,0.0,0.06894235751221718,0.0,0.21694720258773947,0.0,0.11636124315642775,0.054801922152204696,0.0,0.0,0.07011191211864924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04007801574837164,0.0,0.17438514310716535,0.06434104057353836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595535232364609,0.0,0.0,0.06871744726130105,0.0,0.0,0.08153956369261886,0.0,0.0,0.15425208414056885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431605486338319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10836564242789412,0.07495364928144735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08581931124301362,0.08373845879924638,0.0,0.06923412726571154,0.072585231372123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852079567143704,0.0,0.0773060365807604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07408737836454768,0.0,0.1439750200785045,0.0,0.07360569374851787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396189907318573,0.0,0.08162526971339007,0.18000624280063765,0.0,0.0,0.07322875284046376,0.2659066488570861,0.0,0.08014603673091282,0.08420497898909603,0.0,0.0,0.07346735455190255,0.0,0.08270678113578686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14742793166973933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06551025895268574,0.0,0.061003185742601926,0.15360097704790102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587100782769436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923999774878284,0.0,0.16038872279637445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229864029730247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08906668208304305,0.05096297844029688,0.09830584851422976,0.0,0.0,0.04473044873287809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227316115530447,0.0,0.08448566351116384,0.06329411037288407,0.0,0.1217782833669786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111130551980248,0.0,0.0856444175264638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04939897990487331
mentalhealth,pokemuse2095,2020/04/12,"Any info on the correlation between depression and weight gain? I was just reminded of how depression and weight gain/metabolism are related, and I was hoping that as my depression improves (my meds are finally starting to make a significant difference), that I would start to lose weight. How does this work?",9.620314465408805,10.259590528301887,9.333962264150944,59.60899371069184,58.81132075471698,14.613836477987425,42.19496855345911,13.5591,6.566602515723273,250,13,38,10,3,81,38,53,0.218,0.616,0.166,-0.6553,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,2,0,5,3,0,3,0,10,9,6,0,2,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,5,1,6,6,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,27,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12313839213712947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4678833907774211,0.0,0.0,0.18918665239086255,0.0,0.0,0.1584614748509898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19836071698580432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17985005966651482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20257855368527525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087012959333104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011354365778588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25633409620333664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6615080584753216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182602285302936,0.0,0.0,0.12863172028163067,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway2306856,2020/04/12,"I’m worried I’m heading into a depressive episode and I need help to prevent it. I’ve never had a history of depression. My junior year of high school I was very sad, probably even depressed. But it was never officially diagnosed, so there’s no way to know for sure. Other than that, for the rest of life I’ve always been relatively happy.

Until some things started to change recently. Last May, I graduated high school and was probably the happiest I’d ever been. Had a promising future in the marine corps, a great girlfriend, amazing group of friends, loving family, a good savings account, great health, yada yada. Then I lost almost all of it.

Things started going south after I got to boot camp, got hurt and sent home. My friends and I started drifting, the girl and I split, had to dig into my savings significantly to fix my health, which prevented me from working properly. I continued to get more and more distant from almost everyone, but I still kept my head held high, because, as I said, no history of depression and always been relatively happy.

Well, I was finally starting to get back on my feet after around six months of that. Injury finally fully healed in January, and could work. Still didn’t have a medium of making friends, and the ex girl and I now were not on good terms (now blocked). I was about to get into the military after many months of paperwork and pleading for reenlistment.

Then corona happened, and ruined it all. Got laid off, rejected for enlistment, and my friends and I are more distant than ever. No idea what I want to do with my life, other than I love airplanes and want to be a pilot, but can not afford the school and can’t get a job for obvious reasons. I’d love some friends or even a girlfriend but again, no medium to meet people and I don’t want to force it, since I want some genuine relationships. I’m worried this is going to turn into a depression if I don’t do something about it.

As someone with not much experience on how to deal with this, what can I do?",5.394372259864486,6.426382036269434,6.218652849740933,76.92055799123159,68.01554404145078,9.254523714627343,31.944599442008773,9.466822959209583,2.989297648465525,1590,66,288,32,26,524,191,386,0.11900000000000001,0.715,0.166,0.9401,2,1,1,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,0,3,17,30,0,0,17,0,27,12,3,3,8,66,60,30,0,7,9,1,0,0,7,1,6,1,1,2,17,25,0,5,3,0,1,4,13,10,1,1,21,1,29,20,56,36,11,50,0,10,0,3,20,15,0,8,30,205,46,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515482884706605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12592961236412986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06736373848506819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05818676457205136,0.0,0.046128685262565125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08005048484931335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06041758929243096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07801406348800836,0.32587905153890145,0.07680504825950038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09996071347385677,0.1368985303811389,0.0,0.07230742569393117,0.0,0.07402131336697244,0.07133641935432568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16578900705965338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29231832715576095,0.0,0.1581410834090201,0.0,0.0860117914598997,0.12693944141154848,0.18156439606299185,0.16685634088853232,0.0,0.0,0.06691611733646623,0.16110758167543532,0.0,0.0,0.15532171925016594,0.1608706756343527,0.0,0.0,0.05072105668696101,0.2398534975411198,0.07590475220454881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100797821293804,0.08542398906720614,0.0,0.0,0.0750923545476215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04158711458105167,0.06168242735923622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068981321671216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260445502502488,0.0,0.2048896325747324,0.0,0.05051135898516658,0.07671909244368354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12080064664955348,0.0,0.05562730908227327,0.05610950855868296,0.11672515590418787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05246113704822074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631734971137818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780297459432456,0.07471654393801838,0.08124294432939487,0.0,0.0,0.07198098942047912,0.0,0.0,0.22975099902843926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06259630270300316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06411627368022725,0.0582556697315605,0.0,0.0,0.21424290016115527,0.0,0.12086282329927928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07131955694487561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005456541923053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823089359320353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062436968253503575,0.17853220465805947,0.06006456815457206,0.0,0.0,0.06803782707959012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017960494159228,0.15369630020519634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048730008556963536
mentalhealth,Marthorax,2020/04/12,"First Mental Health Struggle... Next Steps? This is my first time reaching out for any sort of help with a mental health issue, so I'm not entirely how. That said, I'm struggling---and that's a weird thing for me to admit. But I am. As days are going by, I feel myself lapsing further and further into loneliness and sadness (depression?), and it's beginning to scare me. With everything happening in the world, I guess I'm reaching out to see what resources you'd recommend to use given the lack of in-person resources. I'm not sure what exactly I want, although I think being able to speak honestly, and have someone listen and offer their thoughts would be a big help.... and I think I just described a therapist. But maybe you may know an ulterior resource that could help. 

​

Thank you for anyone who may read this post and offer a suggestion. Hope you're staying safe out there.",4.768681318681316,6.5490797142857184,5.113095238095237,81.42164835164836,70.30952380952381,8.026373626373626,30.18498168498169,8.617729084823388,2.4542503663003665,704,29,126,12,13,223,110,168,0.08800000000000001,0.7609999999999999,0.151,0.8322,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,3,1,2,4,10,0,2,8,0,11,2,0,2,2,38,33,13,0,5,5,0,1,0,0,3,2,3,0,0,10,13,0,1,6,1,0,2,2,5,0,2,3,5,15,5,19,23,1,19,0,2,1,0,15,9,0,5,6,81,25,1,0.14555753804203392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577115316552467,0.17686834078754332,0.09898411724924527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177721498032208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1162158500018967,0.0,0.0,0.0938725703624332,0.0,0.12536849422805402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081772958794635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735982647487183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2476223350009025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272370324406839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16034803845524148,0.0,0.12871605017941912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.309441712722687,0.0,0.0,0.2926924485850693,0.0,0.0,0.14457147835330714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1519242526802621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07999461624942182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623211122607307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29337552569610625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15480209302196896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12709522780233454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940388562444286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14559692797902507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1384585510187927,0.0,0.1457284882978936,0.0,0.1159905124215216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12333042963095088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15514496850611628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15216834269131332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13718625700191192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340098247571186,0.0,0.16900352051306586,0.09670196049529743,0.18653478604309695,0.0,0.11555642627060014,0.08487577097502366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12571497827584066,0.0,0.0,0.08585360720296184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10339989877527292,0.0,0.17686834078754332,0.0
mentalhealth,throwmeaway0133,2020/04/12,"TW self harmed first time in 8-10 years TW: self harm / suicide






I’ll probably delete this. I’m in a really bad state of mind. I used to scratch my arms as a form of self harm. 
Today I tried to kill my self. Sort of. Day after day it’s something else. My partner reaching out to a girl he was in love with, him not telling me right away, before then continually telling me I’m the worst girlfriend he’s ever had and can’t wait to leave me. I can’t ever keep this house clean. We are running out of food but I’m too terrified to go to the store. Constantly being reminded of how fucking weak I am. I have so much going through my head I want it to stop. I’ve thought about it for what feels like forever but I’m reaching a point that I just don’t see the purpose anymore. At all really. 
It’s too much to explain. All in all I took the only kitchen knife we had, went to the bathroom and attempted to slit my wrists. It was too dull to do anything. I tried multiple times. Nothing. Just scratches and creases. I’m balling my eyes out because I can’t even do that right. 
Now I’m just sitting on the bathroom floor. My partner kept asking through the door what I was doing. I lied. Said nothing. Over and over. Then he asked where the knife was. I said I don’t know. He said to open up the door, he dreamt last night that I killed my self, that I bled out in the bathtub. I chuckled. That’s what I was trying to do. I hid the knife and opened the door. He didn’t search for it. I shut him back out. I don’t know what to do. I feel so empty, and sick. 
I can’t escape anything. Any of the pain. I just want it to stop. I can’t even help him through his issues either. Why am I here. I’ve quite literally fucked up anything you can think of. I can’t do it anymore",-0.6447812635692571,1.5014877101063815,1.2739296569691732,99.59642857142859,92.11170212765957,4.239600521059488,19.37559704732957,5.835819416563157,-0.3259054928354321,1353,44,324,11,49,442,180,376,0.177,0.764,0.059000000000000004,-0.9938,0,0,1,0,0,1,50.0,2,1,0,3,19,15,4,0,17,0,29,12,4,2,5,47,61,14,3,2,8,0,4,1,3,0,3,3,5,8,19,16,2,5,7,1,1,5,11,12,0,1,15,9,45,3,48,45,8,52,0,1,2,3,32,25,2,1,21,196,64,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061662634399380925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798520011355719,0.0,0.0,0.22385530296439107,0.0,0.1695392130763846,0.0,0.08519287270578384,0.06972407162582411,0.07571048213303838,0.05527510902018862,0.0,0.0771584034291993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09798829642892944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695674310684455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07574797228765656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978098451219582,0.1640428542120618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169678970216133,0.06477878967109515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771287653848229,0.10964550349144406,0.0,0.0,0.16765658026241004,0.0,0.0,0.10306626176111627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305950208517423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060778058642528776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10462766658463216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09464194771604732,0.0,0.08059679249897056,0.2006386140821708,0.0,0.09966606588582744,0.07391285655562713,0.0,0.09601255005407744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044299602013946664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183842449451262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155668101451574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333142514910428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08509306952458726,0.0,0.17401169764402002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896301065154738,0.09648541457952108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08571791358783742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776381866111056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964448450776171,0.0,0.0,0.11617844292339816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15487322777506934,0.2587602712900369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225685049284683,0.0,0.4729730295011977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980663934225134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15161801125383909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09918457735043278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15850924293798108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058101373403064475,0.0,0.07198643442645201,0.10574754375633684,0.0,0.08595002946459282,0.0,0.10074411914297714,0.18468869132584304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831475351171435,0.0,0.0,0.10696583936782356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405734913294373,0.08182078056188187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05839222427886515
mentalhealth,thebeingplace,2020/04/12,"How to find your local resources for mental health You don't have to go it alone during the pandemic. If you are struggling, please reach out to your local resources and agencies, such as your United Way 211 or see if your employer offers an Employee Assistance Program.",7.78748299319728,8.66706393877551,7.1555102040816365,72.85258503401364,62.673469387755105,9.798639455782316,34.70068027210884,9.725611199111238,3.548790476190476,219,9,34,4,3,68,40,49,0.08900000000000001,0.7959999999999999,0.115,0.1027,2,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,6,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,0,3,1,0,1,0,7,5,6,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,0,6,5,0,5,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,3,0,24,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675701172994807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243728318969607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20169825997151025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3772428733915828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3576564559528148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3895744199401444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2828099276406883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3710192936241297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2817036752074992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vincentrantgogh,2020/04/12,"What's the explanation of this coward behavior? I like helping people. Especially my loved ones. I offer them my unconditional love and do everything for them. This has happened many times and many people with me. At first I become a doormat for them and let them run all over me. I feel okay I feel like maybe its supposed to be like this. I don't confront or complaint about their behavior. After a while I start feeling exhausted and I want to get away from them. And then I leave without any explanation, or want to leave without any explanation. I block them, cut them off. When they asked me what happened I don't know how to tell them that they started becoming toxic for me. Why do I do that why cant I confront people. This is so much more complicated than this I just dont know how to explain it.",1.97774964838256,4.571182696202532,3.3675105485232097,86.5534036568214,82.79746835443036,6.2959212376933875,23.967651195499297,7.594959193182576,1.302201406469761,638,24,126,11,18,208,90,158,0.066,0.738,0.196,0.951,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,11,1,6,10,3,0,3,1,11,3,0,2,1,23,27,13,0,2,5,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,6,0,1,6,0,0,1,6,4,0,2,0,3,31,6,20,25,3,13,0,0,0,2,18,4,0,2,11,95,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883975429169489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949808049388412,0.0,0.13014468201156856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30597028285365685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234513462001707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449340110941312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21012056217102876,0.0989591583788276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782556833854915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07237130655631024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24498665302753064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284745148375964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15225461990054992,0.0,0.0,0.2933466708902136,0.0,0.14164671868436168,0.0,0.2030225334901536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25004053493885786,0.0,0.0,0.2808763333739516,0.13916258090769712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182859385333372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09386515683860176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2880982689455508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960912151458241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107312714586675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08077248729011657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16340610086835122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2499866275184662,0.0,0.0,0.26705786850796553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chavella420,2020/04/12,"End of my rope Im 19 and have been depressed since high school Id say is when it started. I have been trying to see a therapist but with everything going on I’ve been unable to get in until July. I first went to my primary Dr in January and she gave me a referral to a psychologist. (I’m also dealing with anxiety, anorexia, and ptsd) I live on my own and have felt so lonely. I don’t have friends and feel like a burden when I talk about this stuff with my bf. I don’t want to die but I just have no motivation to live. I love my boyfriend but he’s all I have. I’m not close with my family nor do I have close friends to rely on. Even before quarantine my life consisted of working, eating, laying around for literally all of my free time, and sleeping. I don’t go out or do things, don’t have hobbies or many things that interest me. I just am so stuck in this rut and can’t get myself out of it. Not being able to get myself help, when I finally feel like I’m ready to, has been so discouraging. I just feel like I can’t do life anymore, I just want to be done.",1.263340611353712,2.798023401746729,3.6126179039301327,89.55560807860266,79.17467248908297,7.200087336244542,22.36703056768559,8.07648339933343,0.9954662008733628,825,25,191,15,20,286,120,229,0.11699999999999999,0.7020000000000001,0.18100000000000002,0.9433,0,3,0,0,0,2,24.0,0,0,0,3,14,12,0,0,4,0,27,6,1,1,2,37,47,21,1,2,11,0,4,3,3,0,3,1,0,0,8,16,1,1,5,0,1,3,10,4,0,1,9,6,29,9,30,36,3,24,0,3,1,1,11,12,0,2,12,130,37,3,0.13505101221352914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10800024567457243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10331365469247396,0.0,0.13393431482630316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022403334734096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149184644166559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13923166352210206,0.1163192389273259,0.0,0.14016162887259376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13820407420437825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13819090101660073,0.0,0.0,0.11961511155705908,0.0,0.0,0.08919991987060502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213751416379825,0.0,0.12731407508262593,0.0,0.2048575488121416,0.2894414103294401,0.12967015055184838,0.14794178263859564,0.0,0.1148743219979863,0.0,0.0,0.20868015405530416,0.0,0.21167573956979388,0.0,0.15350520498549275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09052184673356907,0.1426888092186855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14587826806066115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907810477186802,0.1979373086322262,0.0,0.23850503606757675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188881126626268,0.0,0.0,0.1369205292899772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786740621682038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739798546291902,0.0,0.1366788343895263,0.10761817162068787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11171559288168394,0.0,0.13514854443941776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09558980154848104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15460109831290536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854888797581372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568046342357643,0.17944378317461324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874933127317994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09169077231171996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15931317210922394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12519364134013494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983187453412417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cheapcheet,2020/04/12,"Nothing happened today so why... Nothing happened today, past week I’ve been okay cause repressing everything but why... why am I unable to stop hurting myself. It wasn’t as bad as it’s been before, it’s not as bad as it usually is, quarantine has let me distract myself. The thoughts that came before the scratching weren’t even that bad. It was just me telling myself to stop looking for attention, that I’m faking it and should just shut up. Then I couldn’t stop tearing at my skin until it bled. Why? Why couldn’t I stop doing it either, for the next 20 minutes I kept doing it, why? I’m okay, I have no reason to feel the way I do, everything’s okay in my life, besides some things but it’s all right, right? I’m just being a moody emotional teenager, right? It’ll go away right? I’m just a disgusting mockery of people who actually have gone through mental illness, claiming I have it, even thinking that I want to kill myself and harming myself, I’m just faking it, there’s no reason for this.",1.9114118210098103,4.300854321608043,3.2856137832017254,88.38450586264658,81.1608040201005,5.5995214166068425,24.04905479779852,6.868970318607317,0.9769567360612592,786,29,152,9,21,256,106,199,0.318,0.6409999999999999,0.040999999999999995,-0.9969,1,1,0,0,0,2,32.0,0,0,0,0,9,15,2,2,6,3,20,3,1,3,1,31,36,11,1,4,9,0,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,20,3,0,6,6,0,0,3,7,12,0,0,9,4,17,3,18,21,3,25,0,1,1,0,2,9,0,1,12,100,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.09747572502887238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384753077699363,0.0,0.25020550111015205,0.0,0.0,0.16999369572928755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11424461228179587,0.0,0.10261190827314966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11235991690209617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319494140000249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795447668174367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050506087072826576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05676832970582154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17666025307057984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693156224139497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11051064433029452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10214166714863664,0.07055344748433545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08388028587324191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066303802428883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062314174922109,0.0,0.0,0.19168937061909147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09535385666745487,0.06924936858417009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20540183334855625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3412132857721185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33404146439882193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730601858229281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06636077159650129,0.06400383336597483,0.0,0.07929946374380019,0.0,0.0,0.1893632126555644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001189473278647,0.0,0.05891619558849115,0.07928599441452702,0.08012367310641756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5407972271458011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Edgar_Allan_Thoreau,2020/04/12,"How to cope with a big mistake? Long post incoming. On mobile, so apologies for formatting in advance.

I first had experience with suicidal thoughts after my mom died when I was 16. Day in day out, all I could think about was different ways to die. Thankfully I never acted on any of those, but I got very close. Eventually these thoughts faded.

Fast forward to college. Freshman year comes and goes. It's normal, everything is fine. Now, in sophomore year, I(M/19) got into my first serious relationship(F/21). First semester goes by and we're great. This semester comes and things are a bit rough after I got back from abroad, but things got better. We were in love. I have some very good friends, but I was more comfortable with literally anything when it came to her. Then I go to California for spring break, and come back right as Corona is happening. Classes become remote, and she ends up living with me at my apartment for 3 weeks. At the end, I wanted to go back to be with my family for a bit(have been here for two weeks). At this point, I have had enough of my family, and was ready to go back to living with her at my apartment. Before this, she had made it clear that she didn't want to go back to her apartment to live(the person she shares a wall with stays up until 4 am very loudly playing video games). I asked my parents if she could stay at my place whilst gone, a d they said no. Eventually I left. And jokingly said ""goodbye for the last time."" Turns out I'm an idiot and you shouldn't say something like that to someone you love/who loves you when I might not get to see here before she goes back to China and potentially transfers school. Queue yesterday, I told her I was planning on coming back and that I really missed her. I had noticed she had been distant for the past week, and we ended up talking on the phone. Turns out she thought(understandably) that I was serious about not coming back and she thought the relationship was over. I told her that I was wrong and stupid for saying this stuff, but she said there's no coming back as she felt abandoned and was too hurt. It also turns out she met a new guy who she's been staying with for the past two days so she could be away from her roommate. If I had phrased things differently when I left, none of this would've happened and we'd be together again soon. But, because I'm stupid,that's not the case. As such, the same suicidal thoughts from before have flooded my mind, ridding me of any productivity which I exhibited before. I talked with my best friend about it but I'm not sure what to do. She said she would still want to be friends but I told I'd need at least a month before I'm ready for that. Has anyone been this dumb before, and if so, how did you cope?",4.04433956287615,5.544352276437849,4.3363310557038774,87.38830942576588,71.69016697588127,7.559093171636728,25.39123942259831,8.096554002634818,1.3183373093805142,2163,66,446,31,41,676,256,539,0.107,0.775,0.11800000000000001,0.9255,3,0,1,0,0,0,75.0,3,4,1,7,31,27,3,0,16,0,42,2,0,3,4,83,93,41,4,14,14,2,2,1,3,3,0,7,0,2,26,40,0,1,6,4,0,15,10,10,0,5,42,10,69,17,77,40,9,104,0,3,1,2,59,36,1,5,50,304,95,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379839387620929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448899137879314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03829544728947206,0.0,0.0450698544184025,0.0,0.05120120598245547,0.0,0.051456860563351685,0.3790227451954487,0.0,0.033386402960007326,0.06048756636836836,0.27962403993057944,0.0,0.0574762198230594,0.0484383364325005,0.1195861548853432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06264063673947701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28306956504608805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118470451788172,0.0,0.0,0.1059635618130305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113682227097716,0.11444296676565495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14552605144923986,0.05659055816982255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04922244599571922,0.053574156333136606,0.10326183929722273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052586401932550035,0.0,0.0,0.13975831544746764,0.0,0.0,0.1269421498679165,0.0,0.028614309649045894,0.0,0.1245049284473209,0.04593726569878537,0.17521366746514055,0.060382525554632624,0.0,0.05422948043478156,0.09686330512989608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058630871185645576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04464368242114352,0.0,0.0,0.11901239114134958,0.0,0.0,0.02675714964696651,0.0,0.1450849131763596,0.04846844796365523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14829227836283382,0.05182333126145237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05810078215718523,0.05530062808044452,0.06414427001796191,0.0437157383081156,0.0,0.0,0.04061018977595719,0.042240886212179335,0.05289581198129362,0.0,0.0,0.05366155571656522,0.0,0.06235436319854351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06081399922541208,0.0,0.10456556642655716,0.0,0.04782178995552963,0.057221483382827475,0.0,0.051773987508362616,0.0,0.05245313653857212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03508613894628503,0.0,0.0,0.1176018636386251,0.0,0.04677204696536137,0.20838975180611974,0.08710830682719094,0.0,0.0554287019047316,0.043643447655509586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04640521916455643,0.042163509609959904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17512797824546966,0.04373823900015389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06269689254232333,0.11981582037694785,0.0,0.051618715199393435,0.0,0.0,0.08804178028844159,0.0,0.05042352732141327,0.0,0.0,0.10915738355541373,0.03509347877099752,0.0,0.2174005759570612,0.03193598502529033,0.0,0.0,0.15700110489670596,0.0,0.0,0.1787173828992549,0.10700184066741626,0.05701599757129856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355693818183235,0.09691173873900176,0.04347272992093626,0.1317960943903028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781202057947448,0.0598808174952112,0.0,0.07053830789526908
mentalhealth,xXthesadsackXx,2020/04/13,"I have exactly 0 friends I’ve always had trouble making friends and I’m now at a point in my life where I have no friends anymore. When I was 3 I started going to a daycare and the only reason I made friends there was the daycare workers literally made the other kids involve me in everything. And I stayed friends with them from that time until we graduated high school. All the friends I made during that time were through them I have never made friends on my own because I just can’t. I can’t talk to people, I can’t keep conversation going, I can’t relate to anyone. I recently realized that I exhibit a lot of the signs of autism but since I’m a girl, I never got diagnosed. Apparently girls have a lot of different signs and are a lot better at hiding them. I also have OCD and depression.

I’m currently in my second year of college and I have made 0 friends. Also, since I go to college 5 hours away from my hometown, I don’t see any of my high school friends anymore and I don’t talk to them since I don’t know what to talk to them about. I just feel so alone and I don’t know what to do. I’ve tried to make friends, I just don’t know how to interact with people. All I do is spend time with my mom and my girlfriend. And it’s not like the friend group broke up or anything, they were all hanging out yesterday (yes breaking quarantine) and obviously I wasn’t invited. It just hurts having no one except my girlfriend and family that cares about me. I always felt like the outsider of the group and that they just invited me because they felt bad. I’m just having a really bad time right now.",3.2807317073170696,4.6030059512195125,4.564604878048783,85.7047853658537,73.32926829268294,7.808975609756097,28.059024390243906,8.364918446050245,1.8631761951219508,1264,49,264,21,25,418,146,328,0.134,0.76,0.106,-0.9,3,2,0,0,0,0,26.0,1,0,8,2,17,21,0,0,15,1,27,2,0,9,7,57,52,21,0,0,10,1,3,2,13,0,2,0,0,3,10,18,0,1,8,0,1,4,15,6,0,2,14,4,47,15,35,38,7,36,0,3,1,0,34,14,0,4,18,178,57,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07701135608346171,0.0,0.11892642239904745,0.1237418471173804,0.0,0.0,0.05056526317969213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14748419134855814,0.0519920953400767,0.0,0.06118941894508589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986078475825255,0.0,0.12416986370458738,0.09065459048632776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576266329720144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581184722178623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0640435160837038,0.07547072019954272,0.0,0.07768716727741333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06682721540596193,0.0,0.07009709735403505,0.0,0.03759709870641873,0.0,0.14278862979205206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6319277884905473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267762730621401,0.0,0.05947003069890028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571243610675765,0.0,0.0,0.07322659939455133,0.0,0.07960063298160956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0660918571489122,0.0,0.0,0.1225938747352318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05252049966416527,0.07265408156526383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896468122162626,0.0,0.3517916319685521,0.09926765824007217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08708593940905178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11469729895525844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05038618110894673,0.05655179700357426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10309946768444067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07029133448483713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04763495429160133,0.0764513096386745,0.07341849929930253,0.0,0.0,0.06350041316117863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15050636866694894,0.05925284732471873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845264661847228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052630218778624005,0.07925459539900713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17929585467690115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17343249871591168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050483475523268345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0478834259526555
mentalhealth,Eclael,2020/04/13,"how can I overcome ocd? I think I have some form of advanced ocd. To give one example among countless ones, I would avoid listening to a certain song because I used to listen to it when I was sad fearing that something would happen, after I listen to it, that would cause me to be sad; like fight with my gf, etc. It is fucked up, I know. It would be even more fucked up if I could put it to words properly.

Does anyone know how one can become strong mentally and overcome a problem of the sort?",4.989733333333334,5.002587040000002,5.424000000000002,85.86033333333336,68.6,8.266666666666667,29.66666666666667,7.793537801064563,1.723066666666667,384,13,81,4,6,123,65,100,0.23399999999999999,0.679,0.087,-0.9563,0,1,1,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,4,11,3,2,3,0,12,2,0,4,1,21,23,5,0,7,1,0,0,1,1,4,0,4,0,0,7,2,0,1,3,1,0,2,0,8,0,3,1,4,11,3,14,15,4,7,0,2,0,2,6,3,2,3,3,60,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568472476800102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109573360909031,0.19851871877690708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18465180265918335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1435150011128891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15729961702034428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004677206324627,0.1187225613720653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20226766996547724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323502260512465,0.0,0.1724316808887336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15895150346914416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975707692173407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08781631308637898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18114477885797836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36540785267643416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17199557839494398,0.0,0.1806974561221876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13837961104158794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11517594212033334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15524547853730492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.510754310623335,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Taylor-Lynn,2020/04/13,"What doctors do I go to? I need to get a new prescription from my doctors but my doctors I’m registered at is where I go to university and I moved in with my parents a month ago because of the corona virus. So I don’t currently live near my doctors and I think it’s unnecessary to travel for over an hour when there’s a doctors near my parents house. But do I register there because I’m at my parents for 5 months now, go as an emergency patient or see if I can get a phone appointment with my current doctor?",5.2261993769470365,4.685703224299067,6.804252336448599,78.04257788161995,68.1588785046729,10.12398753894081,36.52492211838006,9.725611199111238,3.410658566978194,403,20,84,8,6,140,64,107,0.040999999999999995,0.9590000000000001,0.0,-0.5803,5,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,7,0,5,6,0,0,0,10,15,9,0,2,4,3,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,1,15,0,17,15,0,21,0,0,1,0,4,7,0,2,9,58,17,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048633423019956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195945449309542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7654493551269091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302390943455077,0.0,0.21250830425510536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12274584263947078,0.1438184692976289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100598961792283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19897380841001816,0.13247318779711598,0.0,0.09241939439549288,0.0,0.12037862754000853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4151957681203485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09932238740833414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986463676086653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Post-Melons,2020/04/13,Is it normal to cry every night? I’m 14 years old and I cry myself to sleep every night of my life. I constantly get racing thoughts at night. It’s affecting my academics and mental well-being. Is it just a phase for every teenager or is there something wrong with me?,1.5611111111111102,3.9955799259259273,2.9977777777777814,89.60000000000002,83.07407407407408,5.0814814814814815,20.11111111111111,6.42735559955562,0.3048000000000002,212,6,41,2,6,69,40,54,0.177,0.823,0.0,-0.8645,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,2,1,1,0,8,6,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,0,6,5,0,7,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,6,24,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2013648195848425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4093663533416104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.470992561567045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735373983010172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13161580435622827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18778454052794408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5245958308449646,0.18257134972617414,0.0,0.0,0.19553003539625435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18647223711861144,0.0,0.0,0.1434518391405224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14793129291059945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16753994024386604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20373098630520253,0.0,0.11999534776685783
mentalhealth,Dewlt,2020/04/13,"I’m not sure if I’ve got schizophrenia or not. So to start off I’m not a very socially active person. I used to be in the past in a very blindingly weird way but I was comfortable. Then about 2 years ago I started smoking weed and everything took a turn for the worst. My social interactions plummeted, even when I was around people I couldn’t keep up or tack on personal thoughts. My responses were usually very brief and I don’t even know if they made sense. To be clear the people I was with didn’t really help my situation any greater. They would usually talk down to me and purposely make me feel like shit. And now I don’t know when people are being mean or being genuinely nice. I can’t tell if people are trying to “test” me. My mind seems to have a bunch of tabs open on shit that’s never about the situation at hand. When I’m either high or drunk I seem to phase out of the present and think “why can’t I do this or that. What’s wrong with me. I should just give up”. And sometimes I fail to even speak a word for hours at social events. I’m now SUPER paranoid that everyone I keep close has a secret alliance and is out to get me. I have a very active voice in my head even though I have a somewhat good ability to control it. I’ve never heard an external voice, I’ve never had any hallucinations. Someone please help hahah",2.5490245059288554,4.196344949090912,3.919588932806324,88.2569486166008,75.87272727272727,7.5462450592885375,22.865612648221344,8.321376580360154,1.1648213438735175,1051,30,228,19,23,346,153,275,0.128,0.7170000000000001,0.155,0.8697,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,2,3,15,12,2,0,14,0,25,6,4,4,5,54,50,22,0,6,14,0,2,1,0,2,1,4,0,2,6,14,1,3,9,1,0,2,12,6,0,0,11,7,28,6,32,32,5,39,0,1,1,0,16,17,2,11,20,145,34,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808731129961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13515277981365031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08846217727411829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145418454518986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2625371618213184,0.0,0.0,0.09495423582213322,0.089309175522582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0502454855722124,0.07099140007793918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05191778570139323,0.09532670872627222,0.0,0.08334854642691067,0.07947689242708725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101984374470804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332139578080902,0.10499200854182104,0.0,0.0,0.09786143532274633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17665285721897728,0.0,0.0,0.10922454083226163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04854815574408368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402822013754608,0.06633160352127554,0.0,0.0,0.10824527561383672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033742533182866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2299255133286768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09486184947432078,0.27556822171264744,0.17353565214186545,0.0,0.10908065113787052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06366026876917058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809291329920501,0.0,0.0,0.2040079272811236,0.0,0.22339665675332135,0.0,0.3038918196311004,0.08419760090532045,0.0,0.09828148136186032,0.0,0.14067207254225006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365696488130078,0.0,0.0,0.07987147580785453,0.08685553665478997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06367358614258209,0.09763251767308256,0.07889029406847503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11040598479674787,0.06746708731028933,0.10808823627384788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08582553065260617,0.21888850987792907,0.3279693365191852,0.0,0.07887689423829837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08966780325859744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07059104096841731,0.1086477181686707,0.0,0.063992331074246
mentalhealth,biggfriet,2020/04/13,"Im worried about my brother Hi reddit! This is my first post kinda thing ever so idk if it works. But I have some questions and I thought maybe someone has some tips for me.
(I apologise in advance for my grammatical incorrect sentences, English is not my native language)

It is about my brother. He is a really great guy who loves his family. But he never talks about his emotions. When he does, he doesn't go in much detail about it. 
A lot has changed in the past year for him. Since he was young he had trouble with change, so this has been a very rough year.
His social circle isn't that big so i think he doesn't have a friend who he talks to about this stuff.
You can tell when he is a bit down, but we know out of experience that he needs space at that point, and we always do.

He has been really quiet this past week, he doesn't say much and he spends the day in his room (usually he is working on his car or something)
My dad tried to talk to him, but they don't really get along so my brother said that everything was fine. Which we all don't believe. 
My dad still wants the best for him and he doesn't know what to do even though he really wants to help.
I haven't talked to him yet because I want to do it good so I can kinda figure out what is going on.
I know that it is not healthy if you are sequestered (? If that's the right word), so I want to help him.

I feel like i'm the only one with influence on him because we have a strong bond. But I don't want to force anything on him. 
He will never accept getting help from the outside. (We tried one time, but he didn't even try to consider it for a moment)

So does someone have tips for me how I can get him to talk to me, or encourage him to talk to someone else?
Or maybe how he is able to express his emotions more, without having to talk all the time?

It breaks my heart to see him and my dad like this.
I hope someone can help",2.054727244389028,3.3340304289276865,3.304170043640898,93.69283860660849,76.38154613466334,6.409008728179552,22.25693578553616,6.9077264865688965,0.3683297381546127,1466,39,342,14,32,476,176,401,0.03,0.825,0.145,0.9941,0,0,1,0,0,0,42.0,5,2,1,6,22,13,0,0,14,0,42,2,1,3,5,60,64,29,0,10,15,6,2,2,1,1,0,3,1,1,25,15,0,0,9,0,1,4,15,1,0,3,8,6,50,12,46,55,10,42,0,0,1,1,73,17,0,13,21,227,75,2,0.08114730700962723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752106000723955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06677731947026926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893329034199157,0.0,0.0,0.09142522683285534,0.08515909231561042,0.0,0.08859184228626042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168618213451153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05233329987199583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14202511041235358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778816241153643,0.18255959651381296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071940619227586,0.07340238496120981,0.0,0.0,0.07292996713169157,0.07937763720282323,0.07649845912329728,0.0,0.04103051662783275,0.0579716523416763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902385788826793,0.0,0.0,0.06269420810103962,0.0,0.1271883560428377,0.0,0.09223576922799008,0.06806251111177125,0.0,0.08946519245327353,0.0,0.08034859190096495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09615994951545824,0.21756531750693486,0.0,0.0,0.08059758564605332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08765301651819311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378931324122667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0792889505922046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06898853856442545,0.07323861277857993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16304675366110358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930521516177744,0.060169699933844974,0.1251716114772386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099750306770709,0.06171618361852045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492857309973465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671043425168016,0.0,0.07771668892774819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090355528442716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20794017106367024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06929935680486896,0.07718967151248135,0.06453159554847021,0.0,0.0,0.06466389750941731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712589091149647,0.0,0.0,0.08271946037497639,0.2750233995851708,0.06247116143473575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480434420013803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09289425220291772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4565619209828629,0.07092632303875213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053910665035284334,0.05199591774712188,0.07972681712957723,0.06442189752349232,0.09463529457334056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16528108443122644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893722942659229,0.06695502671642893,0.23931392064253065,0.0,0.06509147495301926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822310820887714,0.0,0.11815241192554125,0.08240902925229518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10451241039046512
mentalhealth,RogueYautja,2020/04/13,Tips to keep me distracted in lockdown? Literally live in the middle of nowhere all i can do is take my dog out or play consoles and the lil voice that wants me to die keeps coming back  cos i cant do anything. My parents act like i don't even fucking matter,3.1133333333333333,4.2203160740740735,4.3157407407407415,88.16583333333334,73.44444444444444,6.881481481481483,28.314814814814817,7.1686216300943375,1.3559037037037038,204,8,44,2,4,67,45,54,0.134,0.779,0.087,-0.4001,1,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,1,2,0,6,1,0,1,1,10,12,2,1,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,2,0,1,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,1,7,2,6,12,1,7,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,1,2,27,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515339804733433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350353961501884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2633009556894571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172291486178781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018870276047994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28257981669967946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5433732887857918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493311314996024,0.0,0.2699053590536143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33940174626845193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298199653170831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1802875093502306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheoretcallyMusical,2020/04/13,"I feel terrible A friend of mine who I've recently taken a romantic interest in has stopped responding to me. I asked my other freind if they knew what was happening. They said that my friend didn't want to respond as, I wasn't listening to their problems. Looking back in what I said and how I said it, its really understandable. But I really want to make it up as, it's made me feel suicidal. The only place I could've thought to come to for help was here. So, I guess, try to convince me why I shouldn't just end it all.",3.2005555555555567,4.3292022037037015,4.75277777777778,85.03250000000003,73.25925925925927,9.474074074074073,27.38888888888889,9.827888789773867,2.4294222222222226,410,15,90,11,8,138,71,108,0.133,0.715,0.152,0.4864,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,3,0,5,6,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,3,1,20,25,7,1,5,3,0,2,0,2,1,0,4,0,0,10,2,0,1,5,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,11,7,18,4,14,13,1,9,0,0,1,0,14,4,0,2,4,60,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674959148164035,0.0,0.0,0.13776750463540485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15433554361435162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14304937856783675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15868779292335247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18118330736820248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27684623324658114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19737141926182644,0.0,0.1584357984695882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009111459670185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504542174846187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16953109037011413,0.1195946180254202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13626372740529452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871902140282103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17143755297370591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295565046728464,0.0,0.176904694547437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.511283349396442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497907005511689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19597839600097952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14223769793242158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12164187367449555,0.0,0.0,0.1865180026354626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21135335942542105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616693417708632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,efan9411,2020/04/13,"If you're experiencing any emotion distress or anything of the sort at the moment, message me. I saw a similar offer, so I'll put out the same thing. If you're in need of any emotional support, send me a message. Just let me know what's up and hopefully I can help you out. I've been through a lot, but I've also overcome a lot over the years. Again, just toss me a message and I'll be here for you!",0.9229069767441836,2.6417026279069797,3.2838953488372127,90.66561046511627,80.86046511627906,6.16046511627907,25.86627906976745,7.1686216300943375,1.08333023255814,310,13,71,4,8,107,56,86,0.028999999999999998,0.878,0.094,0.4482,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,1,9,0,4,0,0,0,0,17,9,8,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,2,8,2,10,5,3,11,0,0,1,0,8,6,0,7,3,48,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19058552829510095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3241334331624401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961181964524119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.536158969802755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1597418031246874,0.0,0.0,0.2367069127768785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13097520248701675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436997665282505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4052246441298561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767122898271212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2395788202702924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704442874545695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583301408343792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15347116053226692
mentalhealth,detectivellamachu,2020/04/13,I made a twitter diary Does anyone else do this? It's the only thing I use twitter for. I made my account private and use it to write down whatever I feel like. It's convenient because a lot of times my thoughts are messy and incoherent and I just need to put them all in one place.,1.2090395480225986,3.3145051864406803,3.0450000000000017,90.74569209039551,81.88135593220339,5.967231638418079,25.08757062146893,7.1686216300943375,1.0711672316384178,222,9,48,3,6,74,44,59,0.047,0.9059999999999999,0.047,0.0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,4,1,14,9,3,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,8,1,6,6,2,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,2,31,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707565185711886,0.25022084442726866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886745920403294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21370882598943905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040051729287833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12347934126318535,0.17446286401943098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930811738711244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20761764649257536,0.0,0.4621526710513083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810777811848173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16548224906083273,0.18573184850719787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25514628974230324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24549736317639234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16224152052478716,0.0,0.0,0.193874562713383,0.14240015474527096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.421836105984735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,t-y-l-a,2020/04/13,"this man is a hero. please listen to what he has to say💙 hi all, i’ve read plenty of stories here on reddit recently, so many of which i can deeply understand and relate to, it breaks my heart to see so many other people suffering this way. the video i’ve linked below is 27 minutes of Justin Furstenfeld explaining a process that played a *huge* part in his journey towards finding peace, happiness and joy in life, and in himself. Justin wants to share this happiness with the world, and for anybody else that may be struggling to make their own recovery, and that is the aim of his speech and this video.
27 minutes of your time is all i ask (maybe quite a bit more if you were to check out Blue October’s music, which i strongly suggest if you haven’t already, their music is unbelievably therapeutic, they’re a treasure of a band that you’ve probably never heard of, and it’s a magical little world once you realise Blue October are in it)

[Justin Furstenfeld - Inner peace & how you can find it.](https://youtu.be/CK3O7DQoS5k)

i intended on posting this on another subreddit with a larger amount of members, but due to their guidelines/rules i’ve been told that’s not allowed (i apologise for any trouble if the same applies here, although i’ve read the rules and it seems okay) so please share this anywhere, or with anybody you think it may do some good or help. i truly believe the advice given in this video and the band in general can help thousands, if not millions more people than they already have.

i’m certainly going to be giving it a go as soon as i wake up tomorrow, i’ve improved a lot over the last year but i’ve still got many, many unresolved issues, and way too many fucked up mistakes i’ve made that i still carry around every single day, huge burdens that i desperately want to be rid of, so i’m going to trust Justin’s words, and i will put in the work. you CANNOT _wait_ for things to get better, you CANNOT _wait_ for other people to make things better, if you want positive changes in your life, you need to put in the work and effort, one of the best lessons i’ve ever learnt. if you’ve made it this far, thank you for reading, i sincerely hope any of this may help you, and that you find things becoming easier day after day, much love and good luck to all of you, take care of yourselves💙💙💙",6.0533105413105455,6.2342490351648365,6.023980463980465,81.88861212861215,66.34065934065934,9.114367114367116,30.91778591778592,8.841846274778883,2.3279702889702887,1841,64,360,27,27,580,226,455,0.051,0.7170000000000001,0.231,0.9981,1,0,0,0,0,0,58.0,0,15,4,10,13,29,1,1,21,1,24,6,2,7,6,71,58,32,0,12,12,0,0,0,0,4,2,3,0,1,32,19,0,2,9,9,1,6,6,6,0,3,8,6,34,23,59,43,15,51,0,1,3,2,40,26,1,17,15,226,66,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08092873346865216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827833146344492,0.0,0.0,0.08973320449723521,0.0,0.11263807968742587,0.08684183219170878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07372552593342184,0.07742359525606406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146590918451394,0.0,0.0933074592720788,0.08691231964250906,0.14649147741215482,0.09041574193823093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08443841039917735,0.0,0.0876104003350293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602321618071691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06918376275846923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07491356907172829,0.06977768722021757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22708229316400425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656385196505751,0.04326895599995343,0.07944651548162544,0.14120203327037387,0.13892751931865596,0.06623707299882757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17632247642425605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813965886485901,0.1665333604209326,0.0,0.0,0.08225690217696485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644041365122375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06750767549692616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699352192379295,0.0,0.08300533395861168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704088518599886,0.07474642520137646,0.15672867649963107,0.11056323744914287,0.4198219670363989,0.0832017532452588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060880715806185114,0.061408453886087025,0.06387430168089936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881984043040856,0.056119580182210464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968375957825735,0.0,0.17224659766185846,0.0,0.0,0.1818184589642132,0.0,0.0,0.07931669450647406,0.0,0.0892917477833852,0.0,0.0,0.16650981039342982,0.0,0.08808707453961084,0.2485210582014491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177272552916641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0658601507700858,0.0,0.0,0.06599517652020241,0.07539434308282388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13227702936220995,0.0,0.0,0.08657929365985415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06226878482921658,0.0,0.0,0.07624763315250656,0.0,0.0,0.1650616801194336,0.05306639256551913,0.0,0.0,0.04829180741463508,0.0,0.0,0.07913609173217935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08621639733629667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14654450206233327,0.13147405345210345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205848948430332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05333203872582915
mentalhealth,cyanidebubbletea,2020/04/13,"I can’t stop talking to myself. So, there’s a possibility I may be a maladaptive daydreamer or I may dissociate, simply based off of the symptoms matching, however neither are confirmed and I am not here to ask about those but they may still be relevant. 

So, I often daydream a lot. Intensely. I find it hard to live in reality. (This is why I have been asked if I’m a maladaptive daydreamer before) and I guess it’s a coping mechanism because my childhood was a little messed up. I also feel the way symptoms of dissociation describe, which is light headed, detachment, emotional numbness, having an altered sense of time and not remembering how I got to a certain place/situation. 

I’ve had these things for a while and never really thought much of them. But I needed to find a way to keep in reality more so I could focus in school, college, and now at work. 

Something I picked up at a very young age is talking to the air as if someone’s there. I act like it’s someone I know. And I have full blown conversations with them. But no ones there. I end up checking the room around me a lot to make sure I am actually alone, and my memories are all messed up because I can’t tell which are my imagination and those deep daydreams and which ones are real. 

I will go into these conversations for hours on end. The moment I stop talking to an actual real person, my brain sends me off into this imaginary world again. Literally, every moment I’m not talking to a real person, I’m talking to an imaginary person. 

I recently realised I spend at least 80% of my time doing this every day. I tried to see if I could stop it, but I just discussed stopping it to the air person again and then cried a lot because I realised how lonely I was.

The point is, does anyone know what this is and if there’s any way to control it? I need to stop having these imaginary conversations. But I can’t stop them myself. I’ve had 3 different chats within the time it’s taken me to write this post.",4.0737533156498715,5.443137500000006,5.6604686118479215,78.43269230769229,71.43589743589743,8.558797524314768,28.83289124668435,9.035553425615538,2.4167824933687,1555,60,297,31,29,529,189,390,0.102,0.8690000000000001,0.03,-0.9715,2,3,1,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,4,2,19,7,0,0,24,0,32,5,2,5,4,69,50,30,0,8,14,0,2,1,0,4,3,0,1,4,22,15,0,8,8,1,2,3,9,4,0,2,8,4,44,3,43,34,9,58,0,1,1,0,23,25,0,13,27,221,66,3,0.0,0.0,0.15862586989623553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417666363350104,0.0,0.06499580038930207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05526996753054801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0568295553229768,0.0,0.0,0.07235221757722639,0.15196280361937495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14863394228372434,0.0,0.06915926466293801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907300755484481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115712114023697,0.12978337201241938,0.0,0.08927706266712421,0.052415822458429066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491535380136886,0.0,0.0,0.0711245324699683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142373424144573,0.14397152276362155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13695583297301844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04109521624285994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485682403294497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04619060632519011,0.0,0.06500325439004123,0.0,0.08953386791026653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280667372376287,0.0,0.08341187023154792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003976477936607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07224119027469157,0.0,0.0,0.08933352068173146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03970698931007095,0.08145916772526264,0.07176754839429618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207291972677291,0.0,0.0,0.054251870778018664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059746671732721364,0.12052915894176318,0.06268449515006845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101484465326876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838657073128039,0.08491535380136886,0.0,0.07683139630559897,0.09162564992361212,0.07783923771016843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775271363906694,0.052067016197659466,0.0,0.08024951947731006,0.0,0.09206903205032113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225490768041528,0.06476586379253693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377285372776947,0.06256967006751245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06490653194882931,0.4076985669199733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07660097580140715,0.1689522410212763,0.0,0.32662989844558205,0.0710381643259951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05399567491476698,0.0,0.0,0.06452348220513057,0.14217678258747785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05518057016898622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06706060580264861,0.0,0.1935375679052476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333828547916706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05916936120665234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_annieisok_,2020/04/13,"Can't even believe I'm putting this out there but... I'm 20 years old with a few mental health problems. I was diagnosed with anxiety at 12, major depressive disorder at 14, PTSD at 15 and bipolar disorder at 19. I have been taking medication since I was 12, but taking meds off and on starting at 18. 

My family has history of mental disorders. My mother having schizophrenia, anxiety, depression and PTSD, my dad having PTSD (from Desert Storm, he was a marine), depression and bipolar disorder, my aunt on my mom's side having schizophrenia, anxiety and depression, and PTSD, their mother and father having schizophrenia as well as my uncle on my mom's side (he actually lives in behavioral care).

I have been into 3 behavioral care units (like a ""mental facility"" but I don't like to call it that). The first time I went was because I fell back into depression and bad anxiety (I wanted to KMS) after I had been sexually abused November 2017. The second time I went March 2018 because I had stopped taking my medication and went crazy after my aunt had found me on Facebook and tried to convince me that she was my real mother and that my mother took me from her because she was an unfit parent (which wasn't true, my mom's adopted sister, so my other aunt, proved that my mom in fact did give birth to me and my dad was there). And the last, most recent time I went because I have been having major anger episodes where I'm super mad and I'm acting completely out of character, but we will get to that in a moment, and I had stopped taking my medication and went absolutely ballistic and cut myself real bad. 

Where im trying to get to is the fact that I'm having these bad episodes of anger outburst and completely out of character moments where I'm irrational and completely unable to be handled. I scream and yell and sometimes throw things that belong to me. I say negative, mean and hurtful, sometimes violent things. I am not like this and never have been like this in my life. Anyone who has witnessed it has looked at me differently, most stopped talking to me completely. It's weighing on my relationship with my boyfriend. It is a very scary thing that is happening to me and I don't like it. 

I know where it stems from, actually. It stems from the sexual abuse I was mentioned happened in November 2017. That situation seemed to have caused something in my brain to just completely ""lose it"" or ""shut down"" and I have tried to fix it multiple times without luck. The outbursts didn't start till a month or two after I left the first behavioral facility. I had been diagnosed as Bipolar when I went most recently, and they said that might help explain the mood swings and things like that. I was prescribed medication for my problem and had adjusted medication for my other issues which have worsened since then as well, but I ended up getting help weening myself off of the medication because it was making my anger issues worse. 

I have gone to therapy and I have done many things to get past the events from my abuse, so I don't understand why I am still so angry and having these super not like me outbursts. It doesn't happen all the time or every day but it does happen often. I know you shouldn't diagnosse yourself but sometimes I wonder if it caused me to fall into schizophrenia, or maybe it could have been there all along. But also at the same time i know there's more to schizophrenia than just becoming someone else for however long the outbursts lasts (anywhere from 30 minutes to a day and a half at the longest is what I've had). Again, not self diagnosing. 

I'm really not all too sure what is wrong with me. But it's making ish really bad and I constantly make a fool of myself. I am not necessarily asking for advice, but I am wanting to put this out there. Maybe can see if anyone knows why I, a really good, nice and sweet person (trust me I really am) turned into still the same person but with a serious switch in character that causes problems. I just miss being normal. I don't like that side of me. I wish it never existed and I wish it would go away. I hate not being able to control myself.",6.296325757575757,6.719805324494949,6.8018181818181835,75.6852272727273,65.83080808080808,10.034343434343436,31.525252525252533,9.928628108626363,3.0207949494949493,3275,119,599,68,48,1071,316,792,0.225,0.72,0.055,-0.9994,3,0,1,0,3,1,88.0,1,1,2,6,26,49,7,0,27,0,73,16,1,7,10,128,130,62,0,13,27,16,0,8,0,4,14,4,0,3,48,49,1,4,12,0,0,15,19,26,2,5,38,7,91,22,87,84,12,100,0,8,2,0,40,42,0,14,51,428,139,0,0.045415547893777344,0.16142999354633142,0.08863804694556489,0.0,0.0,0.044379547782000414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03631879724246822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389710793236746,0.0,0.0,0.06351121410282823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0424574066323638,0.0,0.04266940223462084,0.03492175299584447,0.15168034193040494,0.13842448232085627,0.050157904530293784,0.0,0.051167770329511926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050698771272924915,0.04637435216220735,0.0,0.09260835573061296,0.13996283392601694,0.0,0.0,0.23808668949834025,0.049078073104199864,0.05093739872529219,0.03626061949641528,0.0,0.0,0.05857854251390164,0.0,0.19558172426428103,0.13828747536723332,0.0,0.047449581342365946,0.2082006100192656,0.0,0.039743452011821036,0.046475873436773264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0379388626694296,0.0,0.040224695385103766,0.0,0.0,0.029996541059606637,0.0,0.038264557857026586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042813736673998286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726088367580722,0.0,0.04979580412870454,0.0,0.0,0.09491099726754132,0.0435667318492752,0.025810702469745584,0.038092406847225084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16064327606126835,0.0,0.0,0.044838451135183324,0.0,0.04827460368432221,0.0,0.0,0.06088216886907179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048618283326991966,0.0,0.049056585072426086,0.09480406534265894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983678961293843,0.07403946613171948,0.0,0.0,0.049344125670688785,0.0,0.03207834457469086,0.17750194138373074,0.0,0.040102760841614085,0.04019133074204568,0.03813762203275519,0.05080838124588842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09094569262981596,0.046044237312183316,0.09125204424765768,0.049470845680411116,0.05044643550759476,0.2745083192700918,0.1373045712781909,0.04817871935577599,0.0,0.2127605631962612,0.03625025703921235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700545406307986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044497594302058935,0.0,0.0,0.04765597779705954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05042859136830338,0.0,0.0433542793409695,0.0,0.07931020932300473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303696374918847,0.21235338056024344,0.09131033898348882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033856724637916,0.1163774516492824,0.0,0.08968474914516628,0.0487593021435845,0.0,0.0,0.043200586102803584,0.0361162665317497,0.0,0.0,0.03619031170053295,0.04134460911380478,0.04737832121616824,0.0,0.0,0.07513642105811012,0.051048978669470134,0.0,0.0,0.03848044635137413,0.03496310757154935,0.13475141441849547,0.0,0.06429071710351555,0.0,0.0725378304272508,0.11390829483845034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042803616418952986,0.0,0.1365873599257919,0.03650329708663955,0.0,0.0,0.05193663702078005,0.0,0.15086036001200073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15889302719413878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05045834476470723,0.09250252759504733,0.049399074705555296,0.04436439115501106,0.047279187022742815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037472583313311464,0.05357453364804352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166806348908699,0.25260400737861466,0.08196093607507987,0.0,0.10445127750442117,0.0437789675119954,0.04925122439323292,0.0,0.0,0.04628232326256269,0.032261902188013385,0.04965477216969687,0.0,0.029246123836365656
mentalhealth,Ambassador_of_Mercy,2020/04/13,Is there any way to know if you have Anxiety/Depression/OCD/Adult ADHD without a Doctor I'm absolutely certain that I have the first two but I don't know about the last two,2.755833333333332,4.436347361111113,4.495555555555558,84.20500000000001,75.3888888888889,8.133333333333335,25.88888888888889,8.841846274778883,1.9111222222222224,139,5,29,3,3,47,30,36,0.0,0.941,0.059000000000000004,0.177,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,1,6,7,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,3,7,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,20,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3635703851860703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057240495240825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096421527653276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573234521085909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33251428314539033,0.2465942675110375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5910363816497732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401263831784925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2916185918143733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fat-To-Fit-,2020/04/13,"Idk anymore Ever feel like things are improving in your head? I did, I came off SSRI's, I felt fine for a while off them, started to get back to normal. Now I feel very very dark, I'm sat crying for no reason, i give up.",0.956875,2.190570937500002,3.1025000000000027,94.1925,79.20833333333334,5.633333333333334,18.25,5.985473137389443,-0.3798499999999998,167,3,40,1,4,57,38,48,0.14,0.711,0.149,0.1027,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,1,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,1,1,7,11,1,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,3,7,2,8,7,0,10,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,6,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25165275881062904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19511881846588106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2902234883035611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787335048158085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22953226299949284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566082107169055,0.1812797303362375,0.2436407067455557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13257439888874414,0.24342103455866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604216832219137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12396989736710418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486220558809008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26089824013461843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796062294045617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685808567650183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.418742219603218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sorry_im_here,2020/04/13,"Can anyone explain this? I watched a show a recently got into it a lot (I don’t want to use the term obsessed) now suddenly I’m constantly thinking that the characters are watching me every time I do something! I’m aware it isn’t true but as I type this I’m thinking “[character] is laughing because I’m don’t understand what is happening” I’m avoiding going to the bathroom and showers because I get to embarrassed thinking they can see me. 
I recently came up with an idea that if I’m doing anything I don’t want them to see I just start playing a piano tune with my hand to distract them from me. I don’t understand what’s happening! Does anyone know anything about this or experience it?",2.7518227424749178,4.974000079710149,4.539855072463767,81.42125418060203,77.18840579710144,7.724414715719062,32.354515050167215,8.617729084823388,2.9851096989966566,553,30,102,12,13,187,79,138,0.07,0.805,0.125,0.7264,1,1,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,3,0,3,7,0,4,8,0,12,1,1,1,1,23,37,5,0,3,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,10,5,0,1,8,2,0,2,5,4,0,0,2,5,16,3,12,35,2,12,0,0,4,0,4,2,0,3,8,65,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23384527587390344,0.0,0.2752121540819661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20386894952827825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912527208330449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18070313576165986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463335039515749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14088828586683966,0.0,0.0,0.16357118475122362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08736444678715073,0.0,0.09503378143212222,0.0,0.1337394236955687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2957404588976522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18876864597937607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189858019248133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14216267181655534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3302149896170747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26650201993845424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12873250261348468,0.0,0.0,0.11835768446231915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214394192557826,0.0,0.0,0.09750609742319086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3481594451816605,0.0,0.14442256934462006,0.0,0.0,0.19725889006717265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayforthings_1,2020/04/13,"(Not sure if this is the best subreddit to post this but whatever) Odd recurring thoughts. So for the past few months ive been having wierd thoughts ever couple of days (sometimes everyday). The thoughts usually consist of me thinking about me being a different gender or a different person entirely. Its gotten to the point where whenever i get one of those thoughts i get kinda freaked out for a bit.

If anyone has had something similar happen, what the hell is going on?",5.469717607973422,7.703295639534888,5.803754152823924,75.33476744186048,69.34883720930233,9.565448504983387,34.37873754152824,9.957137785484203,3.975217940199337,379,19,61,10,7,121,65,86,0.129,0.825,0.047,-0.8577,2,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,1,0,8,0,8,0,0,0,2,14,18,5,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,7,0,5,2,10,10,3,13,1,0,0,0,1,4,1,4,7,46,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265028544637919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18986345338768934,0.0,0.19751682011955415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001835638468876,0.0,0.11667786457899175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3780439450080596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16365170079523286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18904554485306974,0.0,0.10282050451285764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15998617928530842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14440791457968105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225954771416594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727077703466234,0.0,0.15797159618515552,0.0,0.0,0.17102704551987669,0.0,0.173270505173929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13928037658246087,0.17893363461108772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17051412840585758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11592566615134245,0.0,0.5745182859519965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19925684932879947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Khaidrion,2020/04/13,I am just at a loss with myself I am 19 years old and spent my whole life battling ADHD it is extreme but when my parents put me on meds as a kid I was incapable of making connections with reality almost sociopathic in nature. We stopped the meds when I was eight and I somewhat scraped by with what little coping skills i had. Now I am suspicious that I have also been suffering with OCPD which is almost the total opposite of ADHD so I am unable to get ahold of my life and feel like i will never be able to create even a simple routine with these two features constantly fighting for front runner. Does anyone have some coping tips that I could try. I am supposed to see my therapist soon but I feel she doesnt take me serious.,3.9495828144458263,5.368602513698633,5.26581569115816,80.94948318804484,71.8082191780822,8.048816936488171,26.97135740971357,8.575989854853784,1.9825561643835607,581,20,110,10,11,194,100,146,0.134,0.816,0.05,-0.9075,1,0,0,0,2,0,5.0,1,0,0,2,8,6,2,0,5,0,17,3,0,1,2,23,24,10,0,1,3,1,2,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,6,9,0,1,2,1,1,3,2,5,0,2,5,3,22,1,17,16,4,16,0,2,1,0,5,4,0,4,10,87,28,0,0.16757016034518302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4027735378351691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355946202523782,0.0,0.0,0.13400579668661142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716895231364564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810838129430605,0.0,0.13379113772758233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664177655345295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067851051617203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694570159809722,0.11971215603269995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08754849257704464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23671951978038294,0.08186631604891538,0.16794932292654455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118543832340296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722653443099308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12924043803090945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17583669494723675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860668324718403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16845429433575876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13353172241331432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14009615734366024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12599190621581266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945618716297377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376913928016735,0.0,0.1636916977606301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18708609974997506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790968925878258
mentalhealth,CharmingSociopath99,2020/04/13,"What's wrong with me? Well let me tell you how I (20m) am. This is not a troll post, Im really trying to find out whats wrong with me.
So Im the type of guy who treats everyone bad, especially girls, like Im just direct and honest and everything and people call me Ahole and all the other stuff. Even my mother says I should get beat up so I learn and be nice. I only had 3 ""proper"" relationships and about 16-20 friends with benefits.
Currently I have my 4th ""proper"" relationship and I literally dont even want to be together with her anymore, she didnt do anything wrong. At first I was really into her, and as soon as she ""was mine"" I lost like all interest, we're together since a month and I dont even want to see her and havent even kissed her yet. Zero attraction. I want to break up with her but I dont want to tell her Im so ashamed.
Its always like that, Im into a girl, no matter if friends with benefits or a real relationship, but most of the time after we have sex I lose all interest, like Im not even trying to lie to them I genuinely have interested and then I lose it all at once.
My other 3 relationships have been like this: first one was my true love, never loved anyone like her, she was toxic as hell tho and I tried hooking up with her best friend..... Also I would always break up with her if she lied to me (she lied about everything every single time, didnt cheat on me tho) hook up with someone else quickly as a punishment and tell her.
The second relationship was only 2 days long lmao, I never liked her. when she tried to kiss me I said sorry but your mouth is smelly, I used her as punishment for my ex....
Third relationship was only a whole month, she was so boring that I cheated twice on her with my ex and never told her. Had no regrets, felt great.
Should I talk to a therapist? Im also too ashamed of doing that....

 tl;dr: I am a bad guy with no emotions and other issues",2.272495277078086,3.660121100755671,4.199067222921915,87.05424315176325,76.02770780856423,7.582147355163728,21.47426007556675,8.278499904357787,0.957511397984887,1475,36,326,26,32,503,183,397,0.195,0.63,0.175,-0.7948,1,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,1,2,1,7,23,44,5,2,12,0,32,6,1,2,8,63,45,37,0,10,9,3,1,7,3,3,0,2,0,4,14,30,0,0,3,0,0,0,14,17,1,7,16,4,61,27,45,23,8,33,1,4,1,5,52,12,1,4,25,230,75,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10230615428019164,0.10644861122306833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343645141937672,0.044726068605381024,0.0,0.05263804299019574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1068168114103938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712770140932214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531578668859432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04125236697629627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22490078476212855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0534348523653077,0.07195242311160208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112425927150322,0.0,0.05389357656104801,0.06112164487553545,0.11497588629207264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061416778938941034,0.0,0.05846318233348125,0.10881780903138603,0.0,0.0,0.148258440774704,0.0,0.033419261741086365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07052203777928252,0.0,0.12667153064051054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4836549747450454,0.06676321954292427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654089167617213,0.0,0.21875171511224786,0.0,0.0,0.056607332783778275,0.0,0.14312175746807299,0.06982574910837229,0.0,0.1154624737429774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211308388301196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14800209229028216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812102327099287,0.043344584947027455,0.14594562131004002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04434552824492643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061261135446681374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728065861241831,0.08195569806235886,0.0,0.0,0.4120491646014397,0.0,0.0,0.060845707490281474,0.05086782350134071,0.0,0.0,0.05097211214849315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05291280871385797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0541976439212993,0.0,0.0,0.07160398619987046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322503628161209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05141293527081045,0.16772563817476446,0.0,0.0,0.07426871578751447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459743433336187,0.0,0.0,0.06112164487553545,0.0,0.17371312888413726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05524553549806164,0.0,0.0,0.15091371193529013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057512542660066376,0.0,0.0,0.07141504269946466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045439158138749006,0.20980824675000465,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Uniquepasswords111,2020/04/13,"I get fleeting suicidal thoughts. How do I manage them? I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety years ago and I got better with working out and travelling. For years I have been distracting myself from depression with extracurricular activities. I coped by making myself extremely busy so I have no time to think about anything. But now that I’m stuck at home, these feelings are coming back and I’m scared. I get overwhelmed and get urges to do something like jumping out of the window. These thoughts are fleeting and I try to distract myself by actively doing something but I’m scared that these thoughts are coming back to me. I know I wouldn’t kill myself but when I get these thoughts they are very strong. I would be fine under normal circumstances but the current situation is making me anxious. How do I deal with these thoughts.",4.664901960784314,7.508014183006537,4.506954248366019,80.91729411764706,73.83660130718955,7.478692810457518,29.807843137254906,8.447377352677275,2.5812243137254898,682,30,114,13,15,209,86,153,0.187,0.728,0.084,-0.9387,1,0,2,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,2,3,8,12,1,5,2,0,16,1,0,4,0,33,37,14,2,3,4,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,2,0,7,14,0,0,8,1,0,4,2,8,0,0,9,1,22,4,18,25,0,17,0,3,0,0,3,4,0,0,10,83,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12012046912172998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10366394226543224,0.1530864928209838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11151228361657277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20839596865689425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984661543460608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334578476602211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13970373201720346,0.23342724452859226,0.13753868725557325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0685173745132801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28319124206214297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837885118558792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13592648154324768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14992052728940347,0.0,0.07447215093074877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06620280670321653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18090649413674387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13276995671698566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.271336109459967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523176880615827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20864275257015996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14822474929241325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08682863542167972,0.0,0.5378946747747088,0.07901633288304341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09200165220645744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180903917656944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09865209754705033,0.0,0.0,0.0962616389558832,0.0,0.0,0.17452658539404234
mentalhealth,Francecco,2020/04/13,"Insecurity and self checking for flaws  

I was re-watching a couple of shows from when I was younger, just chilling with my nostalgia glasses on.

However at one point I saw that in most of these shows the 'villains' were turned back to being 'good guys' by the protagonist having a heart to heart with them, pointing out their issues and that they could turn back and live peacefully as long as they acknowledged their flaws and started to work on them.

Here comes the fun part: I grew up with this idea that anyone evil/flawed could be turned back by the sheer power of introspection, so when I became insecure while growing up I kept checking for my own faults and wrong-doings, feeling even more stressed when I found none since I believed it was my denial which didn't allow me to see them.

This concept that whenever there is a side of yourself, as in your behaviour, mental state, etc, which doesn't comply with is or isn't acceptable, you need to halt yourself completely, rethink your actions and rebuild your personality in order to fit into the ""Norm"", defined by the people around you, I believe is one of the key reasons for my insecurity.

This need for a hero or an epiphany to strike my mind about my wrong ways is awful: I distance myself from a person who I don't consider as part of me and whose actions I don't consider mine, they're faults that need to be corrected and in the mean time could even antagonize you from the ones you love. Who can even say what are you supposed to do at that point?

What if I'm already deep into the ""denial"" and I can't get out? Will my friends be there for me? Will I even be accepted anymore by the ones I love? How can I get rid of this fear of mine?

Now I'm fine, I'm better. I trust the people around me, I trust them to let me know.

I'm good and I love them, they love me and they will let me know.

I care about them.

tldr: Feeling insecure because I don't have a daily villain's redemption arc.

P.S. please forgive but point out any mistakes, I'm not mother tongue but I plan on improving in these days of quarantine",7.136579345674701,6.185072540342298,6.979308417743628,79.71361043194786,64.4278728606357,10.039864943532423,33.412620794038894,9.107695989026183,2.63073445104203,1635,57,331,23,21,519,204,409,0.076,0.8059999999999999,0.11800000000000001,0.9344,2,1,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,8,12,5,21,29,2,6,19,1,34,6,2,3,1,57,63,26,0,8,7,1,2,0,1,3,0,1,0,4,20,23,0,2,13,2,2,5,9,12,0,4,8,5,59,17,60,42,7,46,0,0,2,4,35,26,0,4,12,238,79,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434185560473686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05813706503089752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478446945870981,0.059777555535251686,0.0,0.0,0.15221089377669667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19721276551737096,0.0,0.052114747269521776,0.0,0.0,0.19263900246247664,0.0,0.07561017173247701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716415212519989,0.0,0.0,0.07364324762060306,0.08963607768951454,0.0,0.0,0.20477371371111008,0.09459457777316016,0.0,0.05513486283901668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534547913640593,0.22586498140664496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620156225560376,0.08645401348750371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373687745621592,0.06605042244433884,0.0,0.08933142737408199,0.0,0.0,0.14341221454810751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464989986496876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026153764470945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965093536841956,0.0,0.08923078169806327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396764523956573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17484144151914288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07549044833075395,0.07565717454490657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086372065162007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09312516747825644,0.0,0.0,0.08615519585288986,0.0,0.08632191553281225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901723087039199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23172466658620106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18515765102833426,0.0,0.11853790686544866,0.14929553809638885,0.0,0.09384385460008902,0.32326792165850066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08789936965948496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06798617090935061,0.0,0.0,0.0681255554023597,0.0,0.08918614665690576,0.0,0.0,0.07071934690540298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06051123358835956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09793007853348493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049850706899749006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789701919557428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678590723193402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06223873749168647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18694279067999392,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dont-Go-Hollow,2020/04/13,"ADD/ADHD Diagnosis Hi all,

Before the lockdown I was in touch with the University wellbeing support , as I have a history of depression and anxiety. After a few sessions the counsellor suggested that I go for a learning assessment as she seemed to think that I also have quite a severe case of undiagnosed adult ADD/ADHD based on our discussions. After reading up on the symptoms/behaviours I completely agree with the counsellor as a lot of things I just took for granted. I have took a number of online tests which also suggests a moderate to severe level based on the results. 

I booked on for a private assessment with a psychologist. To cut a long story short, my assessment was cancelled due to the lockdown and I have no idea when I will be able to get one (or if next time I can secure the funding for one via the university).

 I want to get help, but how do I go about getting assessed / help? I'm from the UK if that helps. The last GP visit I mentioned it to my doctor who just shrugged it off with ""counsellors always say that, do you want to try a new anti depressant? It's most likely depression"". I'm digressing but my doctor is a separate issue - very unhelpful as when I go to discuss mental health she is never interested and asks me what medication do I want? (I don't know, im not the Dr).

Anyway - in the UK what would be my best bet in terms of getting an assessment and help if I was diagnosed with ADD/ADHD?

Thanks,",5.005331069609508,6.019816648745523,6.50458404074703,74.58213921901529,68.89247311827957,10.031390303716279,31.88851160158461,10.186864033877496,3.3967591397849466,1131,48,207,29,19,387,153,279,0.079,0.7929999999999999,0.128,0.9277,0,2,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,1,0,2,9,10,1,0,26,0,18,6,0,2,2,34,38,19,0,7,9,0,1,1,0,2,6,1,0,1,12,9,0,1,5,2,2,6,4,4,0,2,5,2,27,6,40,29,6,29,0,3,0,0,19,11,0,8,13,151,39,7,0.10934935056149883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3942500087268589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748932722743968,0.0909874194610017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365195387721233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222688169772312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09304824336760636,0.0,0.11475539709548152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11465071360527565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2825473062223379,0.11098728903417483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22384738765682968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285220897615076,0.0,0.1864372676426171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11623324624071422,0.0,0.0,0.29317825878395604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12344210673523605,0.11811606304918555,0.11413231213302248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060095543336028026,0.08913431537102427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05342256923530265,0.0,0.0,0.0967707342235382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296490747760544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11015796655556792,0.11019842612425676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08433696032665898,0.10561028417122814,0.11629427486348892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148195899847815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630649439976798,0.10937894204873183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695899252806198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954754187679918,0.0,0.2470672821586376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408834716875795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10067419044844968,0.0,0.0,0.07264684962678374,0.07006664850655292,0.0,0.0,0.06376248567659314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429823039164496,0.07424103115137125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022466620365716,0.19349124031545853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767864125275102,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MegaHazzze,2020/04/13,"Please Help... Hello Reddit.

I have installed reddit today, so i thought about sharing my Story with yall. Im a 16 Year old Boy from a small City, pretty popular in school, but i was one of the silent kids tho. I have this one things that has been haunting me for Months, every day when i try to sleep i have this one „Thing“ its feels like a „bad dream“ but i am not sleeping.. It isnt a scary thing its more of a disturbing, confusing thing. I feel some Things in my Head and my Body that i cant really explain, it makes me Panic, and it only happens when im alone, and when it happens i cant move and cant speak, i know it sounds stupid. I have spoken about this with my best friend and he told me its a simple sleep paralysis, but how can that be if im not even asleep.. Dear People if anybody is interested in more Informations and wants to help me and maybe knows whats going on, please write it in the comments or however you can write me on Reddit, 
Please...",5.140393487109903,4.344216218905476,5.74332881049299,86.43146540027142,68.40298507462687,8.901130710085935,26.730438715513344,8.00094639256281,1.2816427860696518,744,17,170,8,11,242,117,201,0.114,0.716,0.171,0.8869,1,1,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,2,0,1,9,11,1,3,8,0,16,6,6,2,0,31,28,19,0,3,8,0,2,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,20,9,0,0,7,1,0,2,6,4,0,3,4,4,23,7,16,23,4,17,0,0,0,0,17,7,0,5,9,112,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12042709737060756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708578726130676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220247197480344,0.0,0.0,0.12915666838432474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07498854293447574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679934701687938,0.0,0.09796773072834353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11758550159442167,0.0830677551623787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08983471952708859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06608245569995767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205645355570198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11933294792930385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15587499921490652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3767948137374065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278047398081535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05680668800033675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07761528008722215,0.0,0.11681509208427705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09281056986781967,0.12358322082594254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201233365514808,0.0,0.23637532880075884,0.0884333053017723,0.0,0.13642509165220504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061129075714515,0.0,0.0,0.38290911906479946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11829471831016572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448952427875817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767774284293893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3490805814047394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3862437711278212,0.0,0.0,0.09231033090168032,0.0,0.0,0.11021626121782599,0.11110691160118198,0.0,0.0789439211518172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858272746727037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07487807374005034
mentalhealth,myEDNOSaccount,2020/04/13,"So i had a drug relapse so this might not make too much sense but things are definitely not okay and i kinda wanna reach out i guess? I can't get over a childhood if abuse and trauma. I don't know how to move forward like at all. I don't even know what foreward means for me....

I got nobody in life i feel close to. If i had OD'd and died today nobody would noticed in days.

I don't wanna live like that. I wanna have people who i cherish and who cherish me. Build a career or make something out of myself. Idk if I'll feel more fullfilled that way but maybe it's worth a try.

But instead i just do nothing like a loser, have flashbacks from whrn my dad would be abusive, restrict, binge, and do drugs.

I've been trying to find a therapist for 1.5 years now and it still haven't seen anyone 

Sorry if this made no sense I'm still kinda high and i might habe started crying in the middle of it.",0.4832117527862181,2.662192893617025,2.086534954407295,96.04833333333336,85.48936170212768,4.006484295845998,17.994934143870317,4.892091775363687,-0.6607150962512667,696,17,153,2,21,226,116,188,0.175,0.69,0.135,-0.8741,0,0,3,0,1,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,10,8,0,0,7,1,18,3,0,4,1,43,32,18,1,9,11,1,2,3,0,4,3,0,0,0,11,10,0,1,6,0,1,2,8,2,0,0,6,3,18,6,18,21,3,21,0,1,1,0,3,11,0,10,12,103,29,1,0.0,0.33316138496161546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09830647136688557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15443571491851632,0.09067138604897684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14591419338478068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260884026889043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286089540053404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217692452227573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12850020892272035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07345447073470933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244572529437552,0.0,0.1548799488587321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14854509518510892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545333786810581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993055764080727,0.20606112359095904,0.0,0.1241469232197732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303327657413627,0.1876949397519904,0.0,0.1412453942460952,0.15314789185113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2982956608055708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14942898589823533,0.10335263826329416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490356686578614,0.16006700154310974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747005579951168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10823599523117283,0.0,0.1573832764336804,0.09951303292455636,0.0,0.22455682041811206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16324026702275946,0.09340429007013663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332665068380988,0.0,0.0,0.19090795662561302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159683413301598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199747638806103,0.0,0.0,0.09053781371135966
mentalhealth,iheartcookin,2020/04/13,"Now sure where to start: criticism makes me wish I was dead... I’m just starting here cause I’m not sure how to address this issue... but basically, when someone criticizes something I’ve done or if I make a mistake, it temporarily destroys me. 
I usually cry which is super embarrassing, and even worse when I have to hide it, or when someone notices. (It must be so irritating to try to give someone feedback and have them cry, ugh, as a manager I would hate that.) 
If I’m alone I will indulge myself though and cry so hard ...it’s like something actually bad happened to me, but in reality I can’t handle being told I didn’t do a good job. 

My parents were definitely assholes, but not quite as bad/abusive as some things I’ve seen on Reddit. Just a little mean and likes to tease with really hurtful stuff and then say “but I’m just joking oh I’m sorry if forgot you don’t like that.” My mom can’t take the slightest negative feedback either, though it manifests itself differently with her... anyhow verbally they were careful to tell me they’re proud of me etc but their actions don’t always reflect that. 

I just know this feeling is going to stop me from growing and improving as a person. No room for improvements when you’re stuck in the “I hate myself” place. I am never suicidal, but just stuck in despair and wanting to hide from it. It has led me to hiding my mistakes rather than owning them. Not sure what else to say. How can I keep myself from crying?

Edit: I wish I could change the headline, that’s probably not the most accurate description, I don’t wish I was dead, I wish I was good.",2.64504761904762,4.882097615873018,4.163412698412703,83.91464285714288,77.60317460317461,6.993650793650794,26.055555555555557,8.021203637495839,1.7373936507936505,1259,49,242,22,30,418,175,315,0.284,0.5429999999999999,0.172,-0.9940000000000001,3,1,2,0,0,0,44.0,0,1,4,3,20,23,4,1,9,0,26,0,0,6,5,61,56,33,3,14,22,2,2,3,0,3,0,2,2,1,18,9,0,3,4,1,0,4,13,11,0,0,12,5,37,12,28,38,5,23,0,2,1,0,15,8,0,8,14,169,55,5,0.0,0.1077326906386753,0.08873086482217664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417213178319367,0.0,0.0,0.07565789077395729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183917493436738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270533114051456,0.09340626457955116,0.09618787393102164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07259718005476191,0.0,0.3995126890421843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499853692724017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930490818675977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595718116613401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10140675955174112,0.0600559042445374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04597502386803125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722470604155116,0.05167546061151136,0.15252918218237455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08040574732844576,0.0,0.08145202454759032,0.1795416159814562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09733838852345024,0.0,0.0,0.09490334000339996,0.09023023340841332,0.08081939336944081,0.0,0.0,0.04997066716094302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13326586022591,0.0911319497215104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12138790262908584,0.0,0.0,0.09904529876212392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649167836499937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07012789867435247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352009288646097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096279595649647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939325949701764,0.09499853692724017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803383326665133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967112168003742,0.0,0.0,0.05824965850716188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14461634361047854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231124448326192,0.139998877619656,0.0,0.1017844480006846,0.12871607904754884,0.0,0.0,0.07601838307382293,0.0,0.0,0.10408875669225623,0.09945851595978517,0.0,0.2570906309365917,0.0,0.06836519411035964,0.0,0.07947351538748007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06040733374673943,0.0,0.1786690795878524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688389033516547,0.0,0.061732928124243434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014237449862573,0.0,0.053630634550816465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4182426172111047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926615761646633,0.0645913708750582,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SigmaIgma,2020/04/13,"Can't do my school work without feeling insane amounts of anxiety I don't procrastinate, I try to get my stuff started definitely a few days before it is due, however, even with that, I've been experiencing insane amounts of anxiety, dread, which then turns into shame. Even on assignments that are not even difficult. I've noticed this through the last 2 years of school and my grades have suffered because of it. It's getting to the point to where I've been having very, very negative thoughts. I was about to finally see my colleges counseling services on this issue, but with the virus hitting I'm feeling even more trapped. Reddit, how can I cope with this, it's so awful, I like school, and I don't know why this is happening.",7.080161870503599,7.242466467625903,6.976178057553959,75.99361960431656,64.17985611510791,10.403237410071943,37.518884892086334,10.125756701596842,3.772546043165468,585,28,108,12,8,186,89,139,0.17300000000000001,0.754,0.073,-0.9222,1,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,8,5,0,2,4,1,13,0,0,1,0,14,25,6,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,12,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,4,4,10,1,17,20,4,12,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,0,8,71,22,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24574072627011076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790967440028046,0.0,0.1366718997196219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035836639627972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4243399027454007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242397314875473,0.0,0.0,0.17594635103907375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782986440814665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420316929314547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676407780960165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827003901588114,0.13092301123662972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846858533853554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18286172983412907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15183349537295768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4876541652980713,0.1279897015193664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368442693495515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838662386625343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751070926620506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904733283910634,0.17470346426454786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650490989476443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14493044203792896,0.0,0.0,0.15482754144402175,0.0,0.1169299448269486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10343106993355196
mentalhealth,givmeallurmoney,2020/04/13,"OCD w/ Corona My ocd habits are ruining my life all over again. I have severe anxiety about corona virus and am constantly aware what I have touched/ am touching. I just ate lunch and am now nauseous because I’m afraid I just ate germs. Every time I sit down I see if there is any new information on the corona virus. Ive read almost everything about it but I still feel a need for information. Ive been using hand sanitizer very often and still don’t feel clean.
Ive seem to have lost the semi-control I worked so hard at. I can’t leave my house. I wash my hands until they bleed. I cant consume enough information. I could read everything ever written on the coronavirus and I would still not be satisfied. I check hourly for updates. It has never been like this before. And Im on prozac. I feel like I’ve failed somehow. Or relapsed almost. 

I’m compulsively washing my hands until they bleed. 
I can’t eat.
I can’t sleep.
I feel like I want to crawl out of my body.
I don’t want to be here anymore.
I am in physical pain. 
It hurts me.

I can’t do it anymore. I genuinely don’t know if I’m going to make it. I’m so scared. I have absolutely no will to live. I have nothing to look forward to. Every time I feel the slightest bit of hope it gets crushed and I want to die even more. 

Didn’t think I would make it to April 14 but now it’s May 4. And maybe not even then. There is no certainty in life. I am moving fucking aimlessly. I just do what people tell me to. Eat. Drink. Breathe. I have to be reminded to do the bare minimum. I have to be told to survive.",-0.2280358632193505,2.047204544342513,1.995259243814292,93.99445683903255,92.24159021406729,5.296886294134001,19.358423686405338,6.883109765328512,0.3187926605504585,1214,39,272,19,44,407,167,327,0.17300000000000001,0.77,0.057,-0.9894,0,0,1,0,0,1,42.0,0,0,2,4,21,12,1,2,6,0,42,21,6,3,3,48,72,17,1,10,10,0,11,3,0,4,8,0,1,0,11,8,6,0,11,3,1,3,14,8,0,0,8,13,45,4,31,55,4,31,0,4,2,1,7,10,1,10,22,172,56,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21156843833044905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183951445247934,0.0,0.08081508919890637,0.0,0.20953500544919898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439778371450959,0.0,0.08989272502340323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533263027438287,0.1173433553269852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11416041020703747,0.11848538391090915,0.08434575634791637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963869754989726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348797914796944,0.0,0.21619426832545052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915541065232524,0.0,0.13954979140629267,0.0955583483480856,0.17801422692673965,0.0,0.18988666942817964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26707636290676035,0.15093992795213698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097663418358068,0.055193071446677885,0.0,0.06003822471640191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463360162685716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049253667881541,0.1040351224281478,0.12189555050556412,0.11309089410228718,0.0,0.1141104269382032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05805754044055684,0.0,0.0,0.11185858412332997,0.0,0.0,0.1492347496053598,0.15483259498001378,0.0,0.09328295384363022,0.0,0.08871184828989764,0.0,0.11531964976407995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410323989308437,0.0,0.106130601148763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11227968307977712,0.0,0.07833147586848349,0.08147686522143797,0.10202875294637502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10136540539957492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11240949081488734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323818005691628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21133921082405804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576508769435246,0.0,0.08418221352092645,0.09617161468952756,0.0,0.1193442802010918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571731013179947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530951589986578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233490556972518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769049838617104,0.0,0.0,0.12320025363810636,0.0,0.0,0.1009445193221147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.091239920602608,0.0,0.08716490302059034,0.18692942747342686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690791888379321,0.0,0.0,0.15008869561864496,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway5929025903,2020/04/13,"Pica - Toilet Paper Just found out SO is eating toilet paper. She won't tell me much but I have caught her a few times... Say's she used to do it as a child but has restarted recently (26). 

Any advice with how I should approach this?",0.8362499999999997,2.921635124999998,2.65816666666667,93.1035,83.16666666666666,4.673333333333334,15.85,5.6839178017228535,-0.6448800000000001,178,3,38,1,5,59,42,48,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,2,0,9,9,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,1,6,0,4,5,2,5,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,27,8,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3529755186111361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456388657585511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696135424891554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3960540533970211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655348887108103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35665664053773954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28725299257133946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.315718190009112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106276106922228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3119741381819905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ptrick00,2020/04/13,"The Importance of Monitoring Your Media Consumption [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ztD6xoh6lE](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ztD6xoh6lE)  


Hey, all! I recently started a vlog series on mental health and wanted to share this video from my YouTube--I hope it helps someone!",16.52136363636364,22.84087984848485,9.082045454545458,44.64306818181819,53.54545454545456,9.36060606060606,32.49242424242424,9.516144504307137,4.400460606060606,237,8,22,5,4,60,32,33,0.0,0.7,0.3,0.8791,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,4,3,1,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,2,13,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4295701063758233,0.0,0.0,0.2708790726538018,0.0,0.0,0.4013911685577805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4072668635151973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3990285190377427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3424170924455935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2860445045362872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383656867358113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VURORA,2020/04/13,"Finding someone immediate help Trying to keep this short and simple, A young woman knocked on my door last night and said that she needed a place to stay, I couldnt take a stranger into my home since its not even my home and theres young kids in the house, me and my mom spent the next few hours talking with her and on the phone with different places like motels and shelters that could take her and no one wanted to do anything. The police even said they couldnt do anything, she told us she’s schizophrenic and we let them know that and they told us that her parents have a restraining order against her, she was living with a nurse who just kicked her out thats why shes here. (They contacted the nurse) and her boyfriend is a drug addict that they know well. She was a young 19 year old girl and her only option was to knock on peoples doors and hope someone nice lets her in. What could I have done?",8.526208791208791,6.094991483516482,7.22206043956044,83.80418956043955,62.736263736263744,10.1989010989011,32.64010989010989,7.645422480735847,1.95825054945055,718,18,155,5,8,215,107,182,0.012,0.914,0.07400000000000001,0.8689,2,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,3,0,5,0,6,4,0,0,12,0,16,3,0,0,0,33,29,12,0,7,2,2,0,1,0,0,3,2,4,3,10,18,0,2,3,1,1,0,4,0,1,1,9,2,29,4,15,14,1,21,0,0,0,0,36,10,0,2,10,103,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364894463042184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060623425353814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19992836946557785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081019521110726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812585285010408,0.0,0.0,0.14519540691248786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539043256685926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11443301858652052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392074460231448,0.0,0.251177074766956,0.12435455205952135,0.12329945983539202,0.14446712978161858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128593097804196,0.0,0.0,0.1376162820519792,0.10205692804889843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2560565295547273,0.0,0.061167725156578215,0.0,0.11055629629996472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14663591341362675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283623104652516,0.0,0.0,0.1331545139808204,0.11749427202011666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313791941309195,0.0,0.08484060389623439,0.0952223110306046,0.0,0.0,0.13902280472217973,0.0,0.0,0.08679980212049747,0.0,0.2616203904222145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2381929172595817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10356898446751668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21216771809699606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13344944163687664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882737287642812,0.10063320439645147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392731303672217,0.0,0.085004428911052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30120691467244465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384780862742138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112572282255124,0.0,0.11297598149821415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08062644727251561
mentalhealth,eshiq,2020/04/13,"How to tell if I’m depressed/ have anxiety? What’s the difference between being actually depressed or have anxiety, and being just sad and down all the time. I’m sorry if I’m offending anyone I just need to know because I’ve felt like I’ve been overly dramatic and that I’m just sad. I don’t know I just feel sometimes like I’m a poser or just want some attention and I don’t want that.",0.4760975609756102,2.819696121951221,3.1494634146341483,87.08760975609756,87.78048780487805,6.694634146341463,22.83414634146341,7.908726449838941,1.4937229268292689,310,12,64,7,10,108,46,82,0.21600000000000005,0.691,0.094,-0.872,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,6,7,1,0,3,0,7,0,0,1,1,24,19,9,0,5,9,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,2,2,4,2,5,15,2,3,0,4,0,0,1,2,0,5,3,38,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.23787466338416866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729515693701527,0.0,0.0,0.17044270712675108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14859387484664818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4199003784641851,0.0,0.0,0.25467738919082283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123252414462591,0.0,0.23404789179478486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679283167996527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23817771268483526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18074500161924276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410849400071992,0.27286943899880634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21305704343849108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421384558149891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28755200721691515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LazyTumbleweed,2020/04/13,"my mindset has changed and it improved my mental health. a little bit of backstory... I'm an 8th grade girl. I have anxiety and depression, along with some other mental stuff.

early in this school year, I had unbearable issues with stress. it was screwing up my life. if I had a lot of homework, I was like: *oh boy... i have to do all of this work... I'll never get through it... the teachers will be so mad...*

then, somewhere in the winter, something in my mind clicked. I just didn't know what. I was working on a bug project that I was stressed and scared about. I didn't feel as stressed doing my work. working on the project was sometimes kinda fun, but still a bit stressful at times.

during this quarantine thing, I've enjoyed school from home. I became more of a goal-oriented person during the quarantine. I like writing lists as I get my work done, and it's hella satisfying to cross off a goal that I had to do. I also like keeping stuff organized. it helps get everything done faster. having everything around me and ready to go is nice.

I wish I could continue being ""homeschooled"" after the quarantine. I'm the type of person who likes to do a burst of work for a few hours straight without getting up at all, never having to get up. my mind gets into a work mode and time flies so fast. people are always insisting that I get up and have a break. no thanks. I'm happy working here for longer, with my 90's rock music and a cup of mint tea.

anyone else have a similar mindset?",1.8786050864251929,4.267121174061438,3.0374259605857112,90.12011119674118,81.28668941979522,5.828426731256193,23.7860838929869,7.1029339738359605,0.9770502917538256,1156,42,231,15,31,371,165,293,0.066,0.767,0.16699999999999998,0.9876,0,3,1,0,0,0,54.0,0,0,0,9,8,17,2,5,19,0,29,4,0,0,4,33,45,16,0,3,4,0,1,4,0,1,2,0,2,4,17,14,1,1,2,1,0,2,6,8,0,0,12,3,26,9,40,29,8,33,0,1,1,1,7,16,1,4,18,157,43,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925667610405882,0.07206093358774933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06625133373976999,0.0,0.0,0.06055508329102615,0.08873537714536622,0.0,0.077095351824933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890968791876812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161487221470432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691457363808088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459134749873184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17725061167499664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234599499844252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15566703240352234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04378926120935135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167267700807557,0.0,0.04921868554818691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092190887636714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205532245730544,0.0,0.0,0.0580484070236155,0.0,0.08687023178933545,0.0,0.08528686517539992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09039140810405244,0.0,0.07697704599772101,0.0,0.0,0.04759494205804297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06117051468780345,0.16924010974515452,0.0867993187415735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07362708013283438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17455163611532412,0.0,0.17488941252700765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13358770109304766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06003986579166935,0.15123742788501984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670507194032034,0.17529444872039535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06667149797137943,0.08565293797810537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06916155556656094,0.0,0.3968154274086908,0.0,0.19828025620333445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973273882127849,0.0,0.0,0.05753542453809955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099823190831728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09958959057047294,0.08348254907524923,0.0,0.5043862230886746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05576972476021121
mentalhealth,cripplindepression_,2020/04/13,"i cant accept myself and my mentality is wrong id really apprechiate any help also sorry if my english is bad
i cant accept how i look and i hate myself for it i realize that i cant really change of how i look i can only change my attitute to make people attracted to me. But i just keep wanting to be beautiful and being liked for being beautiful. I constantly want to look like Emillia Clarke/Daenerys Targaryen, or any conciderd to be beautidful girl or any fake ig model
I keep telling myself im worthless and ugly and i just dont know if i am or not(people arent likely to tell u to ur face)im just lost in my own mind and i just wish to get out and not care.
im coming here for help please be honest but say it ina nice/polite way:)thank youu",1.9498824593128392,3.7200151455696258,4.196238698010852,85.07873417721521,77.92405063291139,7.2990958408679925,23.943942133815554,8.192908349453996,1.4759587703435804,595,20,122,11,14,206,92,158,0.135,0.726,0.139,0.157,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,8,14,1,0,0,0,14,0,0,3,0,34,29,17,0,5,12,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,9,0,2,4,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,1,4,22,8,14,23,1,4,0,2,3,0,7,2,0,5,4,77,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398101393181527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652645507578434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10856551527679452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325692404285819,0.0,0.2750985995864263,0.11200509798723557,0.0,0.1405109252138781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15238843187986612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793274060862048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283728527969189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17430614805634626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4213482144088117,0.0,0.0,0.23114454064450626,0.0,0.0,0.07145838656457366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19057106692637174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3275649726040919,0.0,0.14193774053811492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679275426116154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1310347040006514,0.0,0.1312882704129084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888993671006023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18028604526061034,0.0,0.0,0.14272849812563418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16659479856264658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10340116684843728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555243795463085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22729531170409825,0.11970962934663952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15338432857390336,0.10320786073432488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952243144058774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421620193611752,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,adultcherub,2020/04/13,"Advice for dating someone with intermittent explosive disorder My (24F) boyfriend (24M) was diagnosed with intermittent explosive disorder. I’ve been doing my research on the topic to better understand him. Has anyone dated anyone with this? I just feel lost because when things are good their good, but his tantrums/outbursts are a lot. I have mental health problems myself, and his yelling/throwing things triggers it. But he tells me I’m not being supportive. Has anyone been in a long term relationship with someone with IED and had it work?? I told him I want him to talk to somebody, he WAS on medication but it made him nauseous so he stopped. I know my next step is to give him a definite ultimatum, either seek help or we can’t be together. This is hard, but I love him and want to make it work, on the other hand I don’t want to ruin myself.",5.02522774327122,6.6454821180124215,5.766723602484473,77.61459886128364,69.43478260869566,8.844927536231882,30.80797101449275,9.2995712137729,2.848949896480331,675,28,121,14,12,220,102,161,0.12,0.725,0.156,0.7384,0,0,0,0,1,0,23.0,1,0,1,4,3,8,0,0,5,0,17,5,1,3,0,29,31,10,0,4,8,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,9,9,0,1,3,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,8,3,23,5,16,21,3,12,0,2,0,1,20,4,0,2,7,84,32,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14594458880024275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132901918685449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09104330783829012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208929336536826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15158866142450245,0.0,0.0,0.3423395903725879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551662222491205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432715988082181,0.0,0.2505379586578215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13378963727937793,0.0,0.0,0.1587536948057995,0.0,0.0,0.1001071838824302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207969625315928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132171406236398,0.0,0.0,0.16303484014014855,0.12697333187085627,0.13479558894281402,0.14132003099866305,0.0996933075209258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045595617946705,0.1505112166684178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15883704892063102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14290924601314325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16034765240258775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530901372491614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486456849294428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16948234891924366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200431042995764,0.13053982213536738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984450433461862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427117893990632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15548021225314407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26427420988502165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21745938851500596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Couldbeadeerdoe,2020/04/13,"Feeling Socially Overwhelmed Despite Isolation I'm very lucky and grateful to have people checking in on me, and I wouldn't wish them not to. But people I normally talk to once a week or every few days are now talking to me every day via phone calls or Messenger. And I'm off work so I feel like I should have more time to be social, especially since it's not even face to face. I feel guilty that I feel like I'm not managing this well.

I guess what prompted this is I woke up to an email from my mom saying how hurt she was that I didn't phone her Easter morning and how she feels like she's always the one who has to reach out. I phoned her in the evening, I talked to her multiple times the day before, but I can understand how she needs more from me, especially since Easter is normally a family day. It's just, the idea of doing so freaks me out. I already feel like I'm stretched to my social limits. I'm always the one who ends the conversation first for everyone I talk to and I'm usually the one who is reached out to. Given time, I will reach out to people but I never feel like I am given time, especially not now. I guess I feel particularly overwhelmed because everyone else seems to be starved for social isolation and I feel panicked at the idea of being there for everyone. Like my cousin just broke up with his girlfriend a few weeks before everyone started self-quarantining, so I'm one of the only supports in his life right now. Same with my brother and my mom and my best friend and my boyfriend. I feel like too many people are relying on me to fill this void in them and I just don't know how to make them all feel like I care about them. Because I do. I always am the person people go to to confide in about their troubles and stuff. I'm fine being that person, but normally only 1 or 2 people are struggling at a time. Not everyone in my life. And I guess I am struggling, but since my problem is them I feel like I can't talk to them. Not that I find it easy to confide in others at the best of times.

Does anyone else feel this way? How are you managing?

Tl:dr I feel socially overwhelmed at the idea of being a social support for everyone in my life due to self isolation. How are you managing?",3.401756931847629,4.648032409691631,4.640554547810313,85.57515677636694,72.92070484581498,7.896242549883389,26.128271572946357,8.405096225971981,1.614417932106763,1750,58,366,29,34,578,180,454,0.08900000000000001,0.748,0.163,0.9823,0,3,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,2,7,5,22,28,0,5,18,0,30,5,2,7,2,79,69,29,0,8,17,4,14,9,2,3,3,1,0,3,17,18,0,1,21,0,1,2,11,10,1,5,5,15,64,18,57,56,8,47,0,5,0,0,48,23,0,8,30,246,81,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059019818062647875,0.0,0.1335064159258494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037396555635940264,0.0547996516220562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06520547815202431,0.0,0.0910201839169627,0.0,0.11225421320238638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0546121205589564,0.0,0.05452948075950248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796843629200042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04680333183106957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935636382479048,0.0,0.04737006149724338,0.0,0.0,0.07065003133494764,0.0,0.09012346477698507,0.30663177843533673,0.0,0.0,0.050419010504803886,0.0,0.3785965497368685,0.30566611478381195,0.0,0.0,0.04888249110553644,0.04549261064646487,0.0,0.0,0.04132083146592445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030395620192357763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17675265556337044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0572546553563931,0.18112738378761448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02939285691522984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332986917750028,0.23516182095524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03570031636484998,0.05422336532794519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527728136043698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03965696522260445,0.041249385061483734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15720594712186514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05695764721034247,0.14496585396671638,0.08135245979695667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22247025941605314,0.093398581568408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05117600590250747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045674187934809735,0.0,0.0425318265379178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04868891255856976,0.1115888619247154,0.0,0.0,0.1327250654901237,0.0,0.0,0.32711508619086643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03785554115126026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182408350601368,0.06122523683916175,0.0,0.1213837443081094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149380388454867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1871181968591582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05567768693747239,0.0,0.0,0.058903966106942,0.044129074416048825,0.0,0.04245231426194709,0.0858016696555914,0.0,0.0480876381138672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061502808057092025,0.0,0.0,0.03893625941171123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,T-RexThrasher,2020/04/13,"What to do when your first therapist fails you? After years of depression and anxiety, I made the decision to finally see a therapist this time last year. It started off fine I actually looked forward to our sessions for the first month or two, cause I would walk out of her office feeling great I got so much off my chest and positive changes did happen. But around our third or fourth month things started to change. My therapist seemed less and less interested in seeing me and our sessions seemed to just aimlessly go nowhere and the positive changes started to stagnate. Eventually, I just went back to my pretherapy self, and started loathing seeing my therapist. I couldn’t prove it and maybe I just started projecting but I started getting the feeling my therapist just didn’t like me.

One morning before our appointment she texted and asked if we could reschedule and I agreed. She didn’t reach out to reschedule for me so after 2 weeks of waiting I reached out and got a new appointment set for another 2 weeks later. Started talking about how I was having trouble making friends at work and really badly wished I’d get invited to lunch since they always went in groups of 3 and I always went by myself. In a ver roundabout way she made it very clear “you’re not very likable, and need to work on that.” And offered nothing else. Which is great for my self esteem, I can’t even pay you to act like you care about me. Few more months go by and at this point I feel like I’m just paying to speak to someone that couldn’t care less, and I felt we were just getting nowhere. She cancelled another appointment on me and got back to me a week later to reschedule another 3 weeks out.

Went to a few more appointments, that she cut short by at least 20 min every time. And then cancelled our next appointment, after 3 weeks of not hearing back from her I tried reaching out and left her a voicemail. I never got a call back. It’s been 4 months since and I still haven’t heard back from her. I don’t know what to do now. I’ve gotten even worse since I haven’t been seeing anyone, but I don’t know if I wanna try again. It was really expensive and I feel all I did was throw money away. I just don’t know what to do now. And of course we got a global pandemic doing wonders for my anxiety.

TL;DR: My therapist ghosted me and I’m afraid of seeking help again cause I sank a lot of money into it and got nothing from it.",3.9744365119836833,5.571490675052413,4.527984588361949,85.56105048444674,72.01886792452831,7.840194911893025,28.19587512040343,8.441846121484758,1.9653880559805088,1920,73,379,32,37,610,215,477,0.055999999999999994,0.8170000000000001,0.127,0.9848,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,8,4,1,5,26,16,1,1,13,0,26,2,1,6,4,81,79,36,1,9,16,0,5,3,1,1,0,3,0,2,17,34,1,1,13,0,5,10,13,6,0,5,25,13,64,10,61,50,11,79,0,2,5,0,34,23,0,8,49,255,81,8,0.0,0.0,0.0581060758452121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09909028044323964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873103283781478,0.09110155687919824,0.0,0.0,0.04163434947914423,0.0,0.0,0.05300652970239599,0.0556653350335261,0.0,0.0559432796175525,0.22892720430431746,0.04971651427432999,0.0,0.0,0.050667315243503534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06080078965784625,0.0,0.12141757016122134,0.1223355932561778,0.18896806345435566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04754081072988955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051284913852025285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049741132791538016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786561234127343,0.0,0.050168147373313585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204283640969804,0.042538041373156615,0.057171303402230526,0.06522722851097536,0.0,0.10129570588331184,0.0,0.0,0.04600332594180805,0.0,0.0933273993924866,0.0,0.06768013001217339,0.0,0.28573528634975737,0.13129431038483058,0.0,0.0,0.05265430988439925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06711009348963523,0.0,0.0399108965487456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981710044833431,0.048536074325179694,0.0,0.0,0.06469441977884607,0.0,0.0,0.08727015337202937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05000172352065089,0.0,0.0,0.05062193657049527,0.0,0.11268340430147845,0.03974589164093226,0.0,0.05981966420516166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19010889860625932,0.0,0.04377148117733204,0.04415090965686121,0.045923783199945084,0.05750769028405424,0.06332541563674897,0.0,0.0,0.1142675994932556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0403483617939959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056288056216139686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762904561328905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18979452449573667,0.10841272233503756,0.12423415997404222,0.0,0.0,0.1477655272601465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05045119587582336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950174320196716,0.0,0.04755168713319519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04785898205584769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4148090496054819,0.03955819796560591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944083725948222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085254687696444,0.0,0.05816555680345381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982596003928876,0.0,0.04726302885717417,0.2388118798367217,0.0,0.0,0.2207904786915468,0.0,0.0,0.06847233284064225,0.0,0.06457261816294894,0.08669706630414094,0.0,0.06068013180476905,0.04229814622605059,0.0,0.0,0.07668839954733947
mentalhealth,JP_the_dm,2020/04/13,"How Fencing (the sport) hes been the best thing that has ever happened to my mental health. Oh, how to begin. OK, So I am mildly depressed and have been for a long while. It's a combination of things that just ends up leaving me with numbed feelings, insomnia, general poor perceptions of self worth, and low energy. I have never been suicidal (thank heaven), but I have gotten pretty deep at times. I moved into college the September of 2018 and there the two best things that ever happened for my mental health happened. 

1. I joined the fencing club on kind of a whim, and told myself that I would attend 3 practices to see if I liked it. I was there with my dues to become a full member the second day.
2. At the fencing club I met Michelle and Jacqueline, these two became some of my closest friends and introduced me to their friend, Liz, who kind of adopted me and became my greatest source of empathy and care while away from home.

I can't tell you guys how much fencing has helped me, just going to practice gets me out of my room and into the gym, where I make a serious and wholehearted effort to improve myself. The exercise Is good, the thrill of turning my light on, or understanding and completing a new technique, all of these just turn my brain on and say to it, ""make the happy chemical"". I have since been to 6 team and 2 individual tournaments, and although I haven't done super well I can see marked improvements in my fencing. This sport is so great, it is one of the best things that has ever happened to me.",5.8868168168168165,6.237203297297299,6.131441441441443,80.39253753753756,66.70270270270271,9.010210210210207,30.63363363363363,8.841846274778883,2.3506597597597594,1200,42,230,18,18,384,165,296,0.046,0.731,0.223,0.9966,0,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,1,1,6,15,22,0,0,18,1,22,6,1,5,5,46,42,25,1,2,6,0,1,1,2,1,5,1,2,2,17,19,0,5,3,7,2,3,3,4,1,4,9,5,34,18,37,32,8,33,1,2,2,0,14,17,0,3,14,175,51,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09611986678768976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298895342596872,0.0,0.0,0.32209154614382834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142073449789072,0.0,0.0,0.10430779844662386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072659080278108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06597891472785568,0.0,0.0881160189637534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10469457104228097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09061276135840693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776249372783265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051728994052528086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15808274350543755,0.0,0.053450669193115814,0.0,0.058142864749946885,0.0858094297090237,0.0,0.11279274034742072,0.0,0.10129903725742008,0.3618754771966023,0.10890665305945924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174930152455088,0.0,0.0,0.06857356390023041,0.0,0.1026212724185587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21307193823547707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832729579405027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049981550205891116,0.0,0.0,0.09053760199647053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13658011600327058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062007966588026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1087351009846052,0.07520669093102221,0.0,0.07890470408139053,0.09880778472695564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932520201271086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408199475167863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135784768702015,0.0,0.0,0.16304929328668893,0.0,0.10672748352278233,0.0,0.0,0.08462859103694552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190617312837324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941996455756278,0.09418963139293364,0.0,0.0,0.27187027609458203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05965545882040915,0.0,0.0,0.09775777951326899,0.0,0.0,0.2225591281557968,0.19987621783352214,0.10650416740005428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09198539201716784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267525623110899,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsameturri,2020/04/13,"Frustrated and Lonely So I’ve struggled on and off with my mental health for 10 years now, I’ve always have anxiety since I was a kid and as I reached my 20s I developed depression.

I have attended therapy a few times for long periods but I felt like it never helped - majorly because I hate talking about my problems. I don’t know why but when I’m in a state which most people would want to reach out to someone in i just feel like talking to someone is impossible. I find that times I have opened up to people or told people I’m feeling down or sad the response usually makes me feel worse or the fact I’ve spoken about it makes me regretful.

This is frustrating because the main emotion I feel a lot of the time is loneliness. I have a large family, I have friends and I even have a boyfriend but I don’t feel really seen or understood by anyone - maybe it’s because I haven’t really given them a proper chance to understand me but it feels like it’s something I would really have to put a lot of effort into which mentally drains me so I just end up in the endless cycle of feeling alone and sad at myself and situation. It’s sound kind of bratty lol but I just want someone to understand me the way I understand others. I would like to maybe become better at being my own emotional support but it’s extremely difficult especially as someone who has anxiety, so my thoughts end up spirally out of control and end up having a panic attack or feeling suicidal. 

I just want to know if anyone has any advice for me or can relate. Would be appreciated. (Please do not tell me to call Samaritans... if I had a penny for every time.... in the nicest way possible 😞)",2.6633320339148234,4.841002459214503,4.6164896208946535,80.98231361465744,77.27794561933534,8.258883149790469,26.689503946983727,9.023248300946321,2.446397446642627,1318,53,250,33,31,450,167,331,0.17800000000000002,0.6729999999999999,0.149,-0.951,0,3,1,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,3,12,21,4,2,17,1,26,1,0,3,2,65,54,27,1,11,19,0,9,4,1,4,1,1,0,1,13,12,0,1,17,0,0,2,5,13,0,0,8,11,37,8,41,40,7,36,0,5,1,0,10,17,0,11,18,173,50,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118090329365826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860416790234963,0.0,0.0,0.06912588501823982,0.0,0.0,0.056494527112735886,0.0,0.12710582143162627,0.0,0.0,0.11617733816196453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09451094042240396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15192707101880631,0.09175091231411336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347396870944338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08482988192396837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09317679531708976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155323493379613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868986309787943,0.22074202662781928,0.0,0.0,0.05487091285530921,0.0,0.06999511095121502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07831665688990354,0.0,0.33604576401501296,0.118699018459083,0.07976598567786401,0.0,0.07592995668709722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06418430960706778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820203482767139,0.0,0.0883059005577815,0.0,0.0,0.05568408997255342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08651086734089654,0.09131279122682326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234694423535334,0.0,0.0,0.07351964355835028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412564845359229,0.0,0.0,0.11090774688410714,0.0,0.16692201136899035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744213163933827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407333076225151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09747178336920563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17278330931578675,0.0,0.0,0.09119249802601408,0.0,0.09365570480877446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949250997062868,0.0,0.08351432325473365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15966183388648536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06872132363439648,0.09338090196329346,0.0,0.0,0.2815600924365164,0.06395596161894421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868490703435559,0.0,0.0908716575097468,0.09427365749357801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354667989167998,0.07261208355759867,0.0,0.09500464331211192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06595306235400168,0.19376912893969955,0.0,0.0,0.07938267577654105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2594551297604318,0.0,0.0,0.09149647438266058,0.0,0.14700112729118328,0.13188371992816045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496316611936478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466153885659478,0.2360592202930756,0.0,0.0,0.05349821865100888
mentalhealth,WhatsInMyBed22,2020/04/13,"Mental health, trauma, and coping during COVID-19 Hi there. I am on my way to becoming a psychologist, and am in need of participants for my dissertation work. As it of course has to do with mental health, I thought this would be a good place to post. The only requirement is that you are an undergraduate student between the ages of 18 and 25. If you have about 20 minutes and are in the mood to help out, it would be greatly appreciated! Also feel free to share with any undergrads you may know :) The link is below:

 [https://qfreeaccountssjc1.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_9BsxdCYwwt8A3NX](https://qfreeaccountssjc1.az1.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_9BsxdCYwwt8A3NX)",8.675398322851152,11.918377839622648,6.258050314465411,71.17300838574424,63.05660377358491,8.862054507337527,27.815513626834374,9.444778638647367,2.6218859538784063,545,17,83,11,9,155,77,106,0.025,0.812,0.162,0.9347,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,3,0,2,3,6,0,0,7,0,14,2,0,0,0,17,18,7,0,4,1,0,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,7,5,19,12,0,9,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,2,1,58,11,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17544953318486806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14919563947663222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24230375462657155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11093234428616608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840175200355703,0.0,0.241882977513434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4664117385030033,0.0,0.0,0.1470553668951156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12057336325956156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4421956812809528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16267808492883604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166859242629029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22922033570541675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21011908212400235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17417455842601806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.174144974184616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15972165494345825,0.0,0.0,0.3117028155284884,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,powerdangers,2020/04/13,"Is there something wrong with me? Earlier this morning I felt super suicidal and the most depressed i have felt in a while. And now it’s like 12 hours later and I fucking feel so alive and elevated and like i have a new perspective on life. I have been tracking my emotions for the past few days on a brainstorming app, tracking my thoughts and literally yesterday this time i felt extremely suicidal and depressed, low self esteem yet right now i have high energy, i just wanna talk to people and my self esteem is high. I don’t fucking get it.",3.332857142857143,5.7407425238095255,4.463095238095238,81.76607142857145,76.14285714285714,8.009523809523811,28.595238095238088,8.841846274778883,2.5789809523809515,435,19,80,10,10,142,67,105,0.184,0.6890000000000001,0.127,-0.8267,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,6,9,2,0,5,0,8,3,0,0,0,17,16,10,2,1,1,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,4,9,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,6,0,0,5,4,13,3,7,11,2,18,0,3,0,2,3,7,2,1,13,54,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277099616894543,0.0,0.2745050016266291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17925328270733573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057483624160458,0.0,0.45901828299959296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29464284504068555,0.08325657585504516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3367352827260928,0.0,0.0,0.15693288731713345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11255737291890797,0.15570591683463814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390635792541724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15212268127022072,0.11047691193060287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608856980399614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33248469895217153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12267950823246933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3486177042254955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12808376733356325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12651032133989012,0.09292136669990664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1742300228521641,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,averagestudent560,2020/04/13,"I'm sick of pretending it's okay For context I am 20 years old.

My mother has always been awful and she is still yet to prove me wrong.

When I was young she would constantly compare me to my brother (let's call him Jack). Although Jack is an absolute champion, living in his shadow all my life really hurt, especially at a young age. She never wanted to help me with anything, she never wanted to hear about what made me happy, all she wanted to know was whether or not I was like jack yet. A couple years past and I was a teenager, I had my first relationship and started to get really successful at school, straight A's and hadnt touched alcohol or drugs etc. Yet not matter what I did she never respected me, always found 1 flaw to point out and attack. I couldn't stand even the sight of her at this point but since I was young, I couldn't move out. 

In 2016 I was diagnosed with depression, every moment  was empty and bleak. My life felt pointless and there was no forseeable end to it for me. I attempted suicide which (luckily) failed, I would've tried again if it weren't for a friend noticing my problems and helping me through it. It took so much courage to tell my parents I had a problem and when I finally told them, they got really angry at me saying I was so ungrateful and that I had no reason to be sad. To this day I still haven't fully healed, I just try to hide from it.

Then in 2018 my parents split up, I suppressed all of my built up aggression and tried to comfort her but she abused me further, I disregarded it and figured that she was going through a divorce, she doesn't mean it. It is now 2020, I've been working 30 hours a week at a bar and studying full time at University. My mother is much more abusive, by now she is over the divorce and everyone has moved on. I tried to move out with my girilfriend but couldn't afford it so I was forced to move in with my mother and my sister, I try to stay independent but my mother gets extremely abusive when I ignore her. One day she comes home from god knows where and texts me saying get up here right now. I go upstairs to see what her problem is and she goes mental.

She blamed me for the divorce saying if only I could've been normal maybe the family would've survived. She talked shit about my girlfriend, flaming her for not going upstairs and checking on her every so often. She then took it way too far and said that i make her want to commit suicide. 
The next day she tried to make me apologise and after a few minutes of me explaining why the hell shes I'm the wrong, she strung together a very ingenuine apology.

After that I decided that that was the final straw, I am finally finished with her. All I have to do now is wait until the lease ends in 4 months and I'm free. She thinks I've forgiven her but there's no chance in hell I can forgive her for scarring my life. But 4 more months of abuse may just spell the end for me.

Idk.",3.3873037286865286,4.7098712866779096,4.433650365373804,86.74657073262135,73.06408094435076,7.5645343826119555,25.82533258384861,8.094773233980128,1.4478185422522003,2295,75,477,34,45,748,274,593,0.217,0.706,0.077,-0.9986,3,0,2,0,5,3,53.0,0,0,2,6,28,25,5,0,22,2,45,10,1,5,9,89,78,43,2,14,16,8,2,1,2,2,8,5,1,0,23,30,2,4,12,2,2,10,16,15,0,2,29,9,94,11,68,42,11,91,2,4,2,0,61,29,3,6,50,334,117,4,0.0,0.3224741893651847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271611820224058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113232654135777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05599270152809036,0.0,0.0,0.07740750535109456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947840651690003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05861208810132563,0.0,0.07352914176078983,0.0,0.0543259354462679,0.07528708884366225,0.0,0.1316442257472167,0.0,0.05860440485801133,0.0690611151910994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890702379164345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807948321224604,0.0,0.07588472539935445,0.04494104557084625,0.0,0.11465650222695815,0.06501696917302252,0.0,0.0,0.06414386535770802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533091233246177,0.22360978816028146,0.0,0.05787642127168373,0.0,0.07460445183123361,0.05256901758844052,0.0,0.10664728255415826,0.0,0.11600937124084547,0.0,0.054419338117563824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243188767133177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668818749064267,0.0,0.09121412766091748,0.0,0.06825159223699577,0.0,0.06700758390099792,0.0,0.07284028122552184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07478811811545738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06957747183338338,0.14418005821109114,0.03324184453796042,0.0,0.06008226078194904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643829086416807,0.0908370181487926,0.0,0.06835725277154073,0.07411759661668181,0.0,0.0,0.06857025040139304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862082066841447,0.2892711656889457,0.10003727846955864,0.0,0.15743436701638358,0.0,0.07236335243705047,0.0,0.06666663364112832,0.0,0.07746617539826395,0.07139854777406042,0.0,0.046106965037623286,0.051748945243948734,0.0,0.0,0.15110499695635413,0.0,0.06495371048555353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864321249243482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19532078075052325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13076818626178818,0.06995842477065559,0.0,0.0730515566872572,0.0,0.05810742677970537,0.06472344610918357,0.1623289942157228,0.0,0.06886205429085869,0.054220599772649584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984405173843379,0.056284978259541686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04816042025295709,0.07252363204966436,0.10867672830555834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488536307756621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05468951685452497,0.059471635997037926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043598514079169474,0.0,0.0,0.039675789962092964,0.0,0.0,0.06501696917302252,0.15119415048515705,0.27717597837742164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05614170883884393,0.16053154617588655,0.05400850795915543,0.05457912294143905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0613972483670703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049535327175840436,0.0,0.0,0.1450050804410354,0.14878631335886422,0.0,0.08763352957855719
mentalhealth,SSthrowaway5512,2020/04/13,"I feel insecure all the time in my friendship groups. I don’t know what it is but I always constantly feel like I shouldn’t belong there. I have 3 main friendship groups and whenever we’re al together I always feel uncomfortable and like I’m not funny enough/likeable enough to be in them. It’s with all of them, not just a particular one.

I seem to always do better in smaller groups, or even just 1 on 1 with friends. Sometimes I feel my jokes don’t always hit well or I just feel invisible and such. Maybe I depend too much on the opinion of others. I like these people; I don’t know why I feel like this.",1.464092307692308,3.7007467200000015,3.075199999999999,90.1409846153846,81.8,6.086153846153848,20.815384615384616,7.321109707123232,0.6006123076923076,480,14,102,7,13,158,72,125,0.066,0.6829999999999999,0.251,0.9737,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,1,8,9,0,1,3,0,8,0,0,1,2,27,19,6,0,1,8,0,6,4,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,9,1,0,0,6,1,1,1,0,6,17,8,11,16,5,7,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,5,6,67,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5206681286011617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13835466185623493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905141423397788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232797868998662,0.0,0.1033243028406537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4745915342382504,0.22351538715047906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12086183185883095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17194593643493167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057063197702079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571606845592309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499823740915302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060048772363512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845281557845328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424131837205645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15471890491102774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912189132543199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14065447925459598,0.0,0.14115888500772475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Misspss,2020/04/13,"How long till you started to feel a change? Hey! 
I’m (F24) finally going to therapy now for quite some months (around 5) I’ve been planning on doing that for the last 4 years but couldn’t make myself motivated to start the process... I feel very lost and helpless in my life and for the last two and a half years I’ve been doing nothing productive... 
I haven’t been working (ever in my life) and haven’t started studying all because of extreme anxiety... it’s hard for me to talk about my situation as I’m usually the friend who helps other with their problems and always listen...
I’ve never cried in front of other people except my parents and I use mostly denial as a coping mechanism... 
I seem to be very happy on the outside, and that’s how I’m trying to make myself feel in the inside two by pretending that everything is good... but in fact I can barely do day to day chores like laundry or washing the dishes... 
I really want to change and I wish someone would just come and make me functional again I want to live and fulfill my potential... I was supposed to start studying medicine after finishing first in my Highschool... I have really high hopes and dreams, but I can’t do anything to even start my way to fulfilling them... 
I wonder after how long do people usually start to feel any change with therapy...? 
I feel like there’s no change at all, I just get frustrated because I really tried to believe in it’s powers... every meeting feels too short to even start to talk and even though I’ve tried different therapists till I got to this one (because she felt the smartest and the most professional and with the best chemistry) I don’t fully believe anymore that she can help me... 
but then I wonder if it’s not because of how hard it is for me to open up and talk about my feelings... I feel like every time we meet the topic is relevant and important, but nothing changes after we talk about it, and there are so many other topics that are relevant and there is never enough time... 
I feel like I know myself good enough to have those conversations with myself and have those self discoveries... she’s supposedly need to give me tools to change my situation and go on with my life, but practical tool won’t help me because I can’t just “go sign up for uni” or just go on a walk every day or try to have a morning routine... I need help in being able to start having the abilities of using some practical tools like this that will bring to a change.. 
I’m very lost. 

How long was it for you till you started to feel a change?",5.670033400133601,5.869106000000002,6.196799599198396,80.2603830995324,67.15631262525051,9.29862391449566,30.26058784235137,9.120678840339163,2.3909430327321317,1990,68,391,33,30,647,215,499,0.048,0.785,0.16699999999999998,0.9964,3,0,0,0,0,0,72.0,2,3,2,9,25,16,1,0,19,0,34,5,0,11,6,92,85,43,0,10,16,1,13,5,1,3,4,1,1,1,20,30,1,0,16,2,0,8,11,5,0,5,9,14,53,11,70,70,9,67,0,3,0,0,28,19,0,12,44,266,73,4,0.05546666338403168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046152707277275835,0.0,0.0,0.03771923313407461,0.0,0.04243184566985032,0.0,0.0550080257399009,0.0,0.0,0.04564433789904995,0.049377090027315856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905981587974592,0.0,0.0,0.12498387114547385,0.0582088412003525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4694110019456208,0.047779619151321805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06092752521349741,0.10731422772038024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057950857758799615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146237808988591,0.0,0.10990562413977537,0.0501727725572644,0.140199168475867,0.0,0.049849860538466365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804561159372685,0.11887618621294685,0.05325669518303371,0.06076101854811958,0.0,0.047179915539299226,0.0,0.0,0.04285340653949536,0.0,0.028979042316049936,0.05320867769509434,0.12609193212361794,0.09304561129701187,0.04436175768434024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0590452945707164,0.09937447125820256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14871254111692755,0.05860357519636782,0.0,0.05509091203809055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030483027617299693,0.09042546738986244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753323407676955,0.13549105000025358,0.0,0.048978079964480836,0.1472587549822852,0.0,0.0,0.12109683055467935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11107328554362292,0.05623449083434425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044272961530298124,0.0,0.0,0.08225565616743942,0.08555862042619722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644351892232473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03758564659755103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061589165650907364,0.0,0.0,0.07690720097250935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05307410592200439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05899562403546728,0.0,0.0,0.10660009460669664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05049476716263485,0.05786382673934001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12469370721149335,0.0,0.0,0.04699672388916404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35333630845710584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783280119528721,0.0,0.0,0.12686192709457345,0.06440107128156762,0.0,0.0,0.054495715155179064,0.0,0.06468611494064015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15063289404139926,0.0,0.10836574100957497,0.0,0.0,0.09581077663381828,0.1221773868926656,0.1372974186922215,0.065431350311193,0.04402685563357732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378392552832794,0.0,0.12030246078106485,0.04038039154834765,0.0,0.0,0.039401926251698464,0.0,0.0,0.07143742534664717
mentalhealth,trashbin2137,2020/04/13,"Is there something wrong with me? So as the title says whenever i go on instagram and see People my Age (im a teen) Post pictures with descriptions that has a shiton of emojis make me cringe like we All but when i see some stuff like stories or comments saying like (this is translated so it may not Sound as Bad) ""uuu pretty ILY 😘😘🥰😘🥵🥵"" or ""ooh my bff 🥰🥰🥰"" or the worst one ""why is life so complicated People are fake bitches 😭😭😢😢😢"" and it got the the Point where i wouldn't Just cringe and go on with my day when i see stuff like this i begin to breathe heavily shake some Times feel coldness like im having an anexity attack or it would give me headaches replies appreciated thanks.",-0.2274973147153574,2.014441380952384,2.0368922305764414,94.23924812030077,90.97278911564626,5.271607590404583,19.301467955603293,6.8360192770164,0.23547074829931924,541,17,123,8,19,182,94,147,0.135,0.635,0.23,0.9552,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,1,0,0,0,8,13,2,1,7,0,9,2,1,1,1,22,20,15,0,2,7,0,1,5,0,3,1,3,0,0,8,7,0,0,1,0,0,3,2,7,0,1,1,8,12,6,9,16,4,14,0,0,3,0,5,4,1,7,11,67,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17964821855001778,0.0,0.0,0.1318503068570061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184047197411916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798452837665685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514840193522103,0.17949057854272493,0.0,0.1262970186566435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34114510623262995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153823947940184,0.3857402538342353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540779227291992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700556870019136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21895323141093664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14927831511941705,0.0,0.15123648422756786,0.16065374086918144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2511566503153335,0.0,0.0,0.3775073533382741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12156872547395603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3615439695630722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453845755979809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920800244617868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249143210324636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217647980334892,0.17265248387937304,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,freedgorgans,2020/04/13,"I'm really sick of people telling me I need my parents. There's a lot more to everything I say here, I don't necessarily feel comfortable sharing it all. There's also several sides to every story. But this is my rant and side of the story. 

I left my family home 2 months helping/caring for my brother during a psychotic break. To this day if I hear yelling I cry, to this day if someone touches me unexpectedly I collapse. I've been away from them for 3 years and only started talking to them late last year. I'm considering what type of if any relationship I want.

They didn't really accept my coming out. It was OK just very, ""don't put yourself in a box or label yourself"". When I got sick I had to beg for medical assistance. I had a severe chronic illness, so this was a lot. From the age of 6 my mom would just leave. Every time she got mad she just left, the rest of the time her panic disorder kept her from being a mom. The longest she left was 2 weeks. The first time she left we didn't know if she'd be back. Our dad couldn't cook, didn't know how to pay the bills. He was gone a lot too, so it was just the 3 of us.

My mother wasn't good even after she got treatment for her panic attacks. She started going to church 3-6 times a week. Became obsessed with looking perfect, but, never with helping her kids.

On the off chance my dad might be home that was worse. I had trouble lifting things, I'm Autistic and epileptic which often comes with bad muscle tone + a tendency to just drop things or stop ""randomly"" . It's especially hard to use your hands, I dropped things, burnt myself, cried and tore muscles in my arms. Trying to be the son he wanted, but I just couldn't. Every time I'd be yelled at and/or smacked (a few times I was beaten more severely). 

The older I get the more I get told I'll miss them. The more I get told they'll always be there for you. The more I get told how important they are. I just don't get it, the older I get the more I realise about how awful my family situation was.

Even my siblings can be pretty awful, I ended up homeless after a stint in a mental ward. They to this day call me selfish for not going back home. I just couldn't rehash all that trauma at that point in time. Maybe I am selfish, maybe I should just forgive them, admit I'm selfish and live the life they want? But, no matter what I don't need them.",2.138540202966432,3.8226797704918014,3.763969555035128,88.77158469945358,77.11475409836065,6.368930523028884,22.684621389539426,7.1686216300943375,0.7088727946916471,1840,54,392,21,42,613,236,488,0.187,0.764,0.049,-0.9961,3,0,0,0,1,0,64.0,3,2,10,3,27,20,3,3,29,3,39,9,2,4,4,65,76,22,0,14,20,8,4,0,0,4,6,4,3,1,19,12,1,2,6,1,2,6,14,13,0,1,24,9,68,7,44,37,13,58,1,1,1,0,50,18,0,12,31,255,87,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05880544424533155,0.06118652310130989,0.0,0.0,0.05000592306874471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08365601160775114,0.06908800248361685,0.11308685059344825,0.06139816408947164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750868582536442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12668677282182164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16154820156419394,0.1422708408861913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427680907626255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06512966456356721,0.0,0.0,0.09713757375042513,0.0,0.1858677457250002,0.0,0.0660879897057684,0.0,0.13864340209885276,0.0,0.037181209140354034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254833491608712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23051217751612055,0.0,0.08358260406501915,0.06167717758025476,0.1764365649274091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06587239124230372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08287862880732774,0.0,0.04928856761229232,0.0,0.2212830383770357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08082518159978525,0.05994036185306025,0.08295002183645334,0.0778623268111036,0.31958142353561303,0.0,0.05193953122334508,0.0,0.0,0.06493223470511425,0.0,0.06175038757820659,0.0,0.0,0.18754898730019506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477504049611936,0.0,0.0,0.07407818581264966,0.07410539375358162,0.07800839262305424,0.0,0.1722452336887024,0.05869446763247131,0.0,0.0,0.10904967234241746,0.05671427326865925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05592623537448025,0.0,0.17255358172331825,0.08165126444803597,0.0,0.0,0.05097950376660199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951378957837293,0.0,0.0,0.07481093505660902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07392239633196293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421605702808446,0.0,0.0,0.07894844106492144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058477517405199325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24921887097572984,0.0,0.0,0.08265576221831493,0.0,0.0,0.06230547028702815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10409607330559924,0.0,0.0,0.061478062691006814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059104176475566386,0.06427231892740237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14655899142732934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3001495567377859,0.0,0.0,0.2107958512486384,0.0,0.04992504012662361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845284589332222,0.06351012371430258,0.0,0.06067359263160783,0.13011750762463672,0.0,0.11796974263982893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0749378500061826,0.05223673784403742,0.0,0.0,0.09470750328925724
mentalhealth,earthchild8,2020/04/13,Why in the f*ck is it so hard to find affordable mental health care. I’m obviously an American in case the ridiculous pricing on health care wasn’t enough. 24 living in north Texas. These past 6 months I’ve done a lot of work on myself. Done most of what I can on my own to help me get a decent start on taking better care of myself. It’s at the point though where I’m ready to deal with some trauma I’ve been through. I really want to find a therapist I can talk to online. I live way in the country and the town closest to me has shit for health care. I also don’t have a running car. So I’m just looking for options. If anyone has any experience with online therapy can you please tell me what it was like? How did it help? Was it affordable? Is it a good option?,0.7500762527233107,2.8352885246913613,2.6943718228031948,92.71820261437912,83.50617283950619,5.787073347857661,18.788671023965144,7.048011613610866,0.16998431372548994,599,15,134,8,17,200,100,162,0.063,0.74,0.19699999999999998,0.9686,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,2,7,10,2,0,11,0,16,4,1,1,1,15,28,7,0,2,2,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,2,0,1,2,2,3,0,0,7,2,12,7,23,21,5,20,0,0,1,0,6,14,1,6,4,85,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009936123004022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858811436923967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883045064929711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11169273886998972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5150419663952307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13019885795502287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584758692233087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13049074146006262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12353529650704673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23085250391739265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598101526524545,0.0,0.0,0.10592558291603787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131305243553836,0.0,0.0,0.40271927860670576,0.0,0.0,0.16929828699230315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169863683465875,0.0,0.22303176250990184,0.0,0.1060513151886964,0.0,0.0,0.10736675803750187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12727004280240642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008030189096464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055755178492933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386278711743596,0.1193843325954854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08090424328970477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296342860381821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08938830923171323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09495393515778948,0.1015066608357743,0.11038252907879688,0.0,0.14442297051979433,0.14663176308534678,0.0,0.0,0.12407872469798223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448877841828072,0.10024267199578693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11395656836435104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09194020982855186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drowningmyconscious,2020/04/13,"If physical illness have an observable stage where it can be concluded as 'terminal', can it suggest that mental illnesses have it too? Unless I'm wrong, I believe a 'terminal illness' is regarded as one that is past the point of recovery, and of course with physical illnesses (such as cancer), this point is easier to be observed than mental illnesses. As it varies and is unique for different people, this line in the spectrum of mental health might be harder to locate (assuming it exists). However, since biology is still a factor contributing to mental illness, I wonder if there is a 'stage' where a person's mental illness would be deemed 'terminal'. I suppose this would be the case for incurable illnesses, but for those such as depression or anxiety, is it plausible that the stage might exist too? And if it is, would that in turn mean that society's sweeping expectation for people with mental illness to 'get better' or 'recover' flawed?",13.80858283433133,9.753948550898203,12.929670658682635,51.93746007984034,54.50898203592814,17.360878243512975,49.390219560878236,15.021129683784007,7.394182435129738,756,36,112,26,6,250,88,167,0.163,0.804,0.032,-0.9601,2,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,2,8,3,0,0,9,0,22,11,0,1,0,22,27,15,0,7,7,0,0,0,0,5,11,0,1,1,16,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,1,22,17,0,11,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,9,2,90,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09476199475557603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1395616989438956,0.0,0.10955501107808778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669105784723357,0.0,0.0,0.12942022182463014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647181807112947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13167049614709128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13493328372308053,0.0,0.0,0.7490050520843292,0.2628179372652911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393909785293176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11825015712721312,0.17175495574545133,0.10816054212870868,0.0,0.0,0.23419878520971074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024684729069156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892460416916404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13473752613737314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433425977176414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639860512697005,0.13543494899323402,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moonchild_dionysos,2020/04/13,"I'm lost... should i end it all ? This post probably won't be seen by anyone but i just wanna drop this here khkhkhkh  
  
Hey~(人 •͈ᴗ•͈) ( I apologise for my poor English... it's not my native language) 
I'm 17 years old . I live with my narcissistic parents and my siblings. We're struggling financially and it's so stressing, and I'm so tired of all the abuse I've witnessed or have been threw... we're being verbally/emotionally, mentally and financially abused all the time ...When i was younger, my dad used to physically abuse my mom all the time. She told me that day that he hit her head several times to the ground just because she couldn't pronounce a word correctly. My brother and sister were physically abused too by my father and mother. I still remember my brother being abused by my dad one time when i was 2 years old...he hit him and poured cold water on his naked body...it was winter...and he told him to stay like that till the morning or else he'll have to deal with the consequences. Growing up i was physically abused by my brother...my parents never punished him for what he'd done to me...he was my mother's golden child...my sister was the scapegoat...she always has to deal with their problems and stuff.. I'm the neglected one...i always hated myself...i was shy as a kid and was bullied by my classmates. Now I'm sure i have social anxiety. At the age of 13 i started maladaptive daydreaming...i thought that it'll help me escape reality...but now i have problems focusing and concentrating... I'm not bad at school but i used to work a lot harder. In the past years i always got good marks but now it feels like I can't do it anymore... i feel so empty and i have no dreams to fight for...i just wanna disappear",1.6073269909467562,4.046433198250732,3.2393010587693745,87.9152719809728,82.9067055393586,6.292742059229706,23.31203007518797,7.573540080772713,1.1819259475218669,1349,49,273,23,38,445,176,343,0.23199999999999998,0.677,0.091,-0.9959,2,0,0,0,7,0,75.0,0,0,1,2,14,14,3,2,13,0,27,3,1,2,7,46,49,23,0,6,10,12,2,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,14,14,1,1,4,1,1,3,7,10,0,1,18,4,40,4,29,20,5,33,0,2,1,0,32,6,0,3,23,161,54,2,0.0,0.6284525854970021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206730231476928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06762740630755686,0.0,0.08767118300329041,0.061812841954182074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07381210653696907,0.053889132929723235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057012076394189,0.1822774793499228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09046609673619528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07384865665801969,0.09944052532895337,0.07829806983279866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939757111440225,0.06315451691533032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414753307312617,0.07070327873029432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.087278825720511,0.09072611464972737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059254100796101376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637765475203257,0.0,0.07806072212115582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650139456810898,0.07515635055650617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08908857943590151,0.0,0.0,0.10353553504457112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06818119145342474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18552638083550502,0.0,0.1198071756558494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19632026200438565,0.0,0.08438985948534942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466482750160326,0.0,0.09531247451039344,0.16917784597562432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014240820040468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894677000287853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09986927203380933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011486387671563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06257150003472647,0.09422493453086993,0.07059807486343181,0.0,0.10126436942342353,0.0924171261615534,0.1011993169956364,0.0,0.0,0.08331798452123601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07018143614202574,0.206192029052194,0.10160527223926873,0.0,0.16894409423754134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15270215607570714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435782141898927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17078426756661905
mentalhealth,GodKefka,2020/04/13,"Last Night something unexplained happened that I cannot explain or even comprehend Firstly, I decided to use this sub to vent this as I believe the community to be able to make sense of the situation better than other subs, but I do apologize if this type of post is not allowed here if so, the mods can remove it, no problem for me.

I am ofcourse, not looking for a diagnosis, I am just wanting to share my experience and see if other people on this sub have experienced the same or have a possible reason as to why this happened because right now I feel confused, although today I feel better.

Last night, before going to sleep, everything was fine, the usual routine, mood, my mind, was the same as every other night I had for the last month due to isolation. 

All of a sudden I thought I saw something from the corner of my eye (a floater, or something, you know, like a fast flight small dot), this happens to everyone I assume and believe it to be something normal? 

But for some reason, I just couldn't stop thinking about it, and seeing more and more, and the weirdest part for me is all of a sudden my chest area just felt so weird, like that feeling you get where you see a big spider, or one of them annoying facebook jump scares, that kind of feeling, my auditory and visual senses just felt so vivid in that moment, like every sound i heard, or thing i saw was so sensitive it made me extremely scared, like this powerful sense of dread just covered my whole body and it did not seem to go away at all. The heightened sensitivity of sounds and the more awareness of black dots in my peripheral vision got really vivid that i was not sure if the sounds were real or not, that was the scary part for me, not knowing if it was in my head, after turning all sounds off, things got better sound-wise even though at one point i swore i heard the sound you hear when you are on a plane (i was watching a lot of plane accident videos on youtube beforehand).

After a while i felt asleep, and today I just feel so tired, and extremely confused as to what just happened last night.

Anyway, I just wanted to post this here, get it off my chest, sometimes i feel posting on here just to let it all out helps.

TLDR - Random sense of intense fear, could not establish what was real or not real, feel sleepy.",10.770539435505142,6.894054737668164,9.934141387496704,70.56761144816673,59.919282511210774,12.736270113426535,40.36085465576365,10.056822442137396,3.876787813241888,1807,63,348,25,17,578,212,446,0.11800000000000001,0.787,0.096,-0.9479,2,1,4,0,0,0,53.0,0,5,1,5,25,21,1,6,24,0,26,8,7,6,6,90,67,37,0,11,31,0,10,4,0,0,1,8,0,0,29,11,0,1,20,1,0,4,11,9,0,3,22,30,42,11,54,40,15,51,0,0,11,0,13,20,0,19,28,252,71,1,0.07452463913469276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001835166814913,0.0,0.0,0.045429528303816566,0.0,0.06341497890458879,0.16792749602196005,0.0,0.1977329614022236,0.0,0.0827800737013714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05950186022397438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09844564257970677,0.0,0.12558044538461688,0.07121148637644682,0.0669779402777902,0.07289939723080575,0.0,0.08386093810951388,0.2637732773295276,0.0,0.2146660217800952,0.0,0.0,0.06339061997704011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07787209611365792,0.0,0.08470813968245741,0.0,0.11920832374272285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26360756906163385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648378011110565,0.0,0.08399468459059249,0.0,0.04995229470001256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760594349833451,0.08191358536147837,0.2429901102634379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620649271400445,0.0,0.14563589718514006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0625819273631578,0.0,0.0,0.06335818316600055,0.0,0.0705170154796363,0.04974577531571426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524864093951006,0.0,0.05948485595078135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797453015616088,0.0730183232728823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10099964838097618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16140584361960947,0.0,0.051666001248829314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704498724744347,0.0840153330915746,0.21412201133414588,0.0,0.0,0.07131001487954182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25447606456545546,0.0477423921421317,0.15324748218316936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06364363462531741,0.0,0.0,0.14922432940448024,0.0,0.17815946595838442,0.0678444325185253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08376881684737209,0.07457845993780426,0.0,0.0,0.2294908326013321,0.07370677369429958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06230593530904587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702385904215713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09902171754853703,0.04775237958447225,0.07322007956757551,0.05916423898997455,0.0,0.08565510966803656,0.14128128792471312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106140708969968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06436536036441642,0.08207836124515244,0.0,0.0879131260569236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724689525295653,0.08320409816558859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DaMomma0309,2020/04/13,"Gaslighting? I’m pretty sure I caught a glimpse of my husband chatting with another woman. Someone please tell me what hookup/dating app has a red banner at the top of chats? Last time I asked he said it was WhatsApp or maybe it was a meme, but I don’t believe him. I feel like I’m losing my mind.",0.14548387096774462,2.478341854838714,1.7066935483870969,96.63004032258064,90.12903225806451,3.745161290322581,20.65322580645161,5.148860815047168,-0.2306516129032259,233,8,50,1,8,75,50,62,0.057999999999999996,0.765,0.177,0.6136,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,0,1,6,10,2,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,4,3,8,2,4,6,0,5,0,1,1,0,9,2,0,1,3,25,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797736377866887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2494314128183645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30060359914510365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490719575307766,0.19060917807899866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174858299926744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303499304630088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29849223780700024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26804659215698723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694021269064391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928773518325441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27144177646441753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537974897880326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22606731924102336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514653476026587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23320377447414964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15557910622913576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CicadaInTheWind,2020/04/13,"my s/o's mental health is taking a toll on me my s/o has anger issues, although undiagnosed yet the university counselor has expressed her concern about the seriousness of this matter. for me, it is okay but everyday it gets worse. i know i should be his crying shoulder and be that support in his life but it is taking a toll on me too. sometimes i think i cannot handle the strain but leaving him will make matters worse especially now when his own family is aloof and antagonistic towards him. I don't know what to do, i would even say I'm exhausted for being at the receiving end as im expected to understand and be patient. has anyone ever been in this situation? i don't know how to deal with anything at all, i just know that i am tired.",3.9141818181818167,5.1568760666666655,5.6975151515151525,78.50209090909092,71.66666666666666,8.654545454545454,28.96969696969697,9.095868883498916,2.4129333333333336,590,23,116,12,11,203,98,150,0.174,0.7709999999999999,0.055,-0.9688,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,9,6,1,1,6,1,20,5,1,2,2,23,32,10,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,8,4,0,0,6,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,1,20,2,16,24,2,14,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,0,6,87,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12392995034205495,0.0,0.14585297248980816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19468922253818685,0.0,0.1827260990608969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569815526917539,0.0,0.0,0.11706499069382205,0.16032323728118755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16708558747990135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09260030172968713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883972561977529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19144902952519147,0.18499194632176705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3896246845166411,0.0,0.0,0.18767099509732774,0.0,0.0,0.12518947106759004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830871477477635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17861568691048524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14094793119758184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19922457729361304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17529435636744928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20112923701961768,0.0,0.0,0.2665240300012149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356788833265093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20371068446322446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18451252688870648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3612443002180875,0.12590582600507044,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,altaccount1959,2020/04/13,What the hell is normal??! How much anxiety is normal to have without it being a anxiety disorder? How sad or suicidal is normal to be without being depressed?,3.867471264367815,6.685381724137932,6.490344827586206,65.74747126436785,76.58620689655173,9.383908045977012,33.804597701149426,9.725611199111238,4.6240252873563215,126,7,17,4,3,45,20,29,0.452,0.486,0.062,-0.9505,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,0,7,0,0,2,0,8,7,3,1,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,19,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3558139127149458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003026785276014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26653269889360826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17095758312546833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6835751673832169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543817399490906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.44835704812461386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Smide1234,2020/04/13,"Does anyone else seem to find comfort from making themselves suffer? Does anyone else seem to find comfort from making themselves suffer?

I find that even if I’m happy dating someone, if it goes wrong I kind of like the feeling of being sad and suffering slightly? I don’t know if this makes any sense or whether it has something to do with being unhappy/things not being good in life is all I’ve ever really known. So it’s familiar. 

Any thoughts?!",4.3743687707641215,6.335888430232557,4.843289036544848,82.22081395348839,71.67441860465118,6.774750830564784,27.40199335548173,7.447530270364453,1.6823109634551499,359,13,62,4,7,114,60,86,0.2,0.672,0.127,-0.8503,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,11,0,0,1,0,7,1,0,3,2,22,16,7,0,3,6,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,9,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,1,1,3,6,9,12,1,3,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,6,3,36,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22144864741108128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276974046038787,0.33366009878051706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2849726934345432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2720332365073592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754218200438964,0.14728152850001736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232753209975514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4464481888516168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656709758665947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17332670274865594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16955372084778625,0.08948253548595463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500576562463727,0.07954644690736885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3260542010452456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043077355286102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964534790449234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13795827848638947,0.12534808164804856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292622241245368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780199435477868,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cutethrowaway117,2020/04/13,"Paedophilic ocd and ptsd Hi. I'm a 18 year old girl. From age 12 - 16 I was sexually abused. My first abuser introduced me to ddlg (Daddy dom little girl roleplay and kink), and the following who were up to 40 years older than me played it out with me. Ddlg has become an ingrained part of my sexuality. 

Here is the thing. I have horrible intrusive thoughts about children and harming children (paedophilic ocd), being a child myself and getting harmed and I have a tendency to seek out situations where I can act like a child getting harmed. So there's repetitive behaviour and intrusive thoughts. It's horrible. I feel like a freak.
I seek out porn with youthful women and lolicon manga. I would never harm a child and try to distance myself from them as much as I possibly can. 

I talk to a sexologist and a therapist because of my trauma and I can never tell them about this. I'm evil. I'm broken. But I will never hurt anyone. All my abusers were abused before they abused me and the cycle ends with me.

How can I deal with this? How can I ever tell anyone and get help?",2.6567559523809514,5.098913379807698,3.930549450549453,84.52397435897437,78.66346153846155,6.846520146520146,24.80860805860806,7.957251820313856,1.594153113553114,845,31,160,15,21,276,118,208,0.218,0.7020000000000001,0.079,-0.9869,0,0,0,0,5,0,26.0,0,0,3,1,9,11,1,0,12,0,15,1,0,2,5,32,25,19,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,8,6,20,0,0,3,1,0,2,3,8,0,1,5,1,27,3,22,17,3,21,0,1,0,1,18,6,0,0,15,110,33,0,0.0,0.6970174718984897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16453606266837295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172219778732669,0.12994215651032845,0.10011685856073403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212984948482976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042085731503111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642687317991424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05949056821470267,0.08405369519066881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10007840172693534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18441170604587614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07886254808646445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12595351900165355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149618652541663,0.11792253739788065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649092948706551,0.0,0.2722314110254083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12346051103108108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274103239934302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13263981736424546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13753393642865802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13225062805313836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456768953157364,0.2056736110455256,0.0,0.0,0.1366080504742136,0.07816562791232329,0.0,0.0,0.1868119440905192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988091495526846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08357967069584814,0.0,0.0,0.1515336191355526
mentalhealth,itzjakob54,2020/04/13,"I have a concern about myself I’ve recently noticed that I’ve had manic states randomly where I need to expend energy either by screaming/weird voices, or physically through shaking out my body or with no better way to put it “spazz out”. Along with my actions, I’ve had manic thoughts questioning my mental health and calling myself crazy like no one else has what I’m going through. I’ve had this problem since high school it feels and is accelerated after consuming alcohol or weed. Any answers for me? Should I see a mental health counselor?",6.349731258840173,7.822001257425742,6.510410183875532,74.0850495049505,66.12871287128712,8.939745403111743,33.24045261669024,9.23628265651192,3.1789422913719942,441,19,72,8,7,141,73,101,0.131,0.795,0.07400000000000001,-0.5974,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,2,4,0,1,2,0,7,4,1,0,0,19,13,5,0,3,4,0,1,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,7,1,0,4,0,0,4,2,2,0,1,4,3,9,2,13,8,1,12,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,5,3,46,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098243564565532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335157739138509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17364396687819847,0.0,0.21808595199364847,0.0,0.0,0.20048185045425249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164014224187816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927379815792156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158274242967743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41739372844396505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074406356208008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09592025550934064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3957226820750088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558126822130496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22353077697140286,0.0,0.0,0.13304291409337102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18786782599141946,0.0,0.1973727380706504,0.21994217818408096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938589287809098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1987033491758976,0.156455029988578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16241185081735465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586950829079266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558430332349512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,foldawart,2020/04/13,"help???????? i’m not sure if this is the right place to post this but. please forgive me if i sound ignorant at all and please correct me!! i am just very confused about what is happening to me, I haven’t slept in 38 hours and I don’t feel very tired. in fact, i feel almost hyper, and yesterday i felt SO GOOD i was probably the happiest i have been in a while. I was so happy that i wasn’t even able to feel sad when my family started crying about my dead father (he passed a little under a month ago). i worked out for the first time in a while, have eaten 2 meals in the past 2 days, i’m starting crafts and assignments i would have never had the energy to do a few days ago. actually a few days ago i was the saddest I had been since the day my father died. I don’t know what is happening to me but it is kind of stressing me out. there is so much more but this is getting very long. i’ve never been to a therapist or anything but i think i might have been a little depressed for maybe, almost a year now??? i’m just confused",1.0569178082191757,2.7344313470319648,3.0129200913242014,92.96458561643836,80.27853881278537,6.3891324200913235,20.0824200913242,7.365786028017652,0.364835433789954,791,20,184,11,20,266,113,219,0.21100000000000002,0.6759999999999999,0.113,-0.9746,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,2,11,11,0,3,16,0,27,4,1,0,6,36,43,17,2,3,10,2,4,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,7,6,2,1,7,0,0,1,7,6,0,1,13,5,25,5,20,28,5,38,0,2,0,0,5,13,0,8,23,126,32,2,0.11726918315101555,0.0,0.11443780647235108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31185616573724834,0.0,0.23485629485466425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650254575131904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288146911547721,0.30251568677974744,0.0,0.10100377561175236,0.0,0.12170689769445715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745518947923882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055094918474777,0.0,0.1778844676375741,0.0,0.11259680608866356,0.0,0.0,0.09974910728126388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06126830808936388,0.0,0.0,0.09835982702836216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20740150274603655,0.12483522607585615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860306153783601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548652332567565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221178083836833,0.06444807620571083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23506905847426646,0.0,0.10377953684266313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11781265652472026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124404071427882,0.0,0.0,0.0936031431778729,0.0,0.08620634278114703,0.0,0.18089044692377265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194670460230316,0.0,0.0,0.1225213369194943,0.25745269565008144,0.0,0.0,0.11231146126238492,0.0,0.1264360136869516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10014724166303653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970062801288214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16600746283092407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13433145308827685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052481729605587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13615856015983085,0.0,0.07514135744109134,0.0,0.0,0.06838060374914692,0.13478367503835773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29027807256592697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08537336200316982,0.0,0.0,0.08330466309324584,0.0,0.0,0.07551750912805713
mentalhealth,TamzynJay,2020/04/13,"Boss at work's support is making me anxious I'm working from home in isolation. I'm horrendously depressed and lonely and basically a 10th the person I was. I sucks but I'm trying not to dump my stuff on to other people. Sounds like a tangent but it relates to the rest of the post.

Anyway, to the point. My great uncle died and I can't be with my family. 

My team leader at work knows this and is really supportive. She asks how I am every day and tells me I'm doing a good job.

The thing is, I feel guilty for it. I'm not used to people helping me like this, I am the dust myself off and carry on type of person but I really appreciate her help. I'm grateful for it. But I'm not used to it. Like I keep thinking I'm not depressed enough for this nice treatment and eventually she's going to tell me that I've been faking and she's so disappointed.

It sounds really dumb but even getting support is making me anxious.",1.3341940789473696,3.3819777812500043,3.7770942982456153,85.98128289473685,81.08333333333334,6.333771929824562,21.042763157894736,7.475848149327749,0.8041312499999997,722,21,149,11,19,251,103,192,0.175,0.609,0.215,0.9042,1,3,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,4,4,17,3,0,9,0,11,0,0,6,0,28,34,15,1,0,9,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,1,2,12,9,0,1,3,1,0,1,5,8,0,0,2,3,22,9,20,31,2,10,0,4,0,0,12,7,2,0,4,97,34,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29019033100124786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12006953076870835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283004863746919,0.0,0.22124201850281205,0.0,0.13329541172371714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13270784613390132,0.0,0.08483020738637942,0.0,0.10821215593189618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107723199898635,0.0,0.06494067250138158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06710206658039927,0.0,0.0729926573515862,0.10772531293775836,0.0,0.14160020981651464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17217475178331978,0.0,0.12883093061971082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1274520716795858,0.11415906540104502,0.0,0.0,0.0705846013280886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18824078502683572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17146292414970368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17808152746687808,0.2242892435950707,0.0,0.0,0.12141273368217533,0.0,0.12300537400801492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468365437257293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470275225703164,0.0,0.4372400694703728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22451596980684116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08532660882980955,0.08229606018497193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08719903831644261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22185347061112168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805069635499075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GiantMidget10,2020/04/13,Need help for a friend who is not in a good mental state at all. Worried for the future. I just need someone who can give me advice on serious mental health issues. Don't want too give too many details here but he is not well right now.,1.2526530612244926,3.379523244897964,2.440163265306122,95.02269387755103,81.85714285714286,4.736326530612245,17.963265306122448,5.6839178017228535,-0.4521542857142853,185,4,40,1,5,59,40,49,0.157,0.764,0.079,-0.2108,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,3,0,4,1,0,0,1,8,9,1,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,5,9,1,7,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,2,26,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211245309056576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1748283743779809,0.0,0.0,0.4341492252505918,0.0,0.18979836470024591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405319483377376,0.0,0.0,0.15167505872099835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23618429574610506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22941897530318595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4560871006652672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355771177232746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932474189020661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19173180155609928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13346962974482796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20345872289760206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298049063005444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RightSeeker,2020/04/13,"I want to write in order to better the rights of people with mental illnesses. What writing platform would have the largest audience and would be the most suitable? I live in Bangladesh and the human rights situations for people with mental illness is just truly horrible. The state doesn't respect basic rights and neither does the populace when it comes to people with mental illnesses. 

I wanted to do some activist writing online about this at an international level. Someone has to point it out. My goal is to write about the rights of those with mental illnesses regardless of where they live. I know there would not be negligible impact if at all, but writing about it would give me a sense of meaning. 

I initially chose medium, but a lot of people on the internet just does not go on that website since you are only allowed two free articles per day. I am looking for something that is similar to medium but does not have a paywall. I would also avoid a run of the mill regular blog since those places just don't have that audience base and neither has much legitimacy given that a lot of blogs sells snakeoil or is of low quality. I initially thought of publishing on Quora but they don't have a pseudonym feature and they force you to use your real name. Not only that, they no longer have the blogging functionality.

Can anyone suggest an online writing platform where I would have the largest audience and would be the most suitable?

PS: Now I know a lot of people would suggest to post on a Bangladeshi writing platform but that would not work. That is because some topics are censored by the government, the private news media, civil society and by the general populace. Besides I am writing in a wider international perspective and not only about Bangladesh.",7.168374741200829,8.400232959627331,6.990621118012424,72.25365424430645,64.12422360248448,9.735817805383023,36.140786749482395,9.842372674337009,3.79444761904762,1431,67,230,29,21,453,156,322,0.07200000000000001,0.899,0.03,-0.8803,1,1,1,0,0,0,23.0,0,3,4,3,13,5,0,1,26,0,34,4,0,2,1,69,46,17,0,13,16,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,1,14,14,0,1,4,3,2,3,12,2,0,1,2,1,20,4,41,32,11,32,0,1,1,0,20,23,0,9,3,178,34,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163748980887921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263676523572702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05460743854129794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922666850181406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716566479015702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05777200872516335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351774855972367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593377385331391,0.05091065992059692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846219508179456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15820243726241914,0.0,0.07522505471386351,0.0,0.0,0.2284744012872577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757942091548842,0.0,0.0,0.3611042792335769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585197138478133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043900102160883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105191813793327,0.0,0.09359255145912752,0.0,0.08468252313037496,0.0,0.0857933522595858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196221543439066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3060050144570725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482038229925761,0.10069223010809507,0.0,0.0,0.07590126305488708,0.06896344186791681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07111690711118998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750712745321765,0.0,0.0,0.07736878615121084,0.0,0.0,0.1056737942780604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652156675516088,0.0,0.0,0.572718723695989,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PleaseHelp1026,2020/04/13,"I randomly feel void/emotionless This is a throwaway for personal reasons

I am just a teenager(16 F), and i randomly started feeling void, it’s sort of like a numb feeling. I just can’t feel emotions. I know I should feel, but it seems as if my brain or body can’t feel or comprehend it.

I have never quite felt this way before. In the past, i have been sexually assaulted by two different people (in a span of 2 year) multiple times. One of them has also physically assaulted me. It left me with trauma. At those times, I also felt blank, but in the sense that I was sad, but also numb. But during that numbness, i was still able to comprehend things in some weird way.

For months, i felt horrible. I felt so blank. During those times, i caught myself self harming, and I also faced body dysphoria, so i had become bulimic. I felt like a broken down shell of someone, and I didn’t know how to get better.

I slowly eventually got better. I do sometimes have distant flashbacks or ptsd, and in those cases, i feel empty, but those feelings eventually go away.

Recently, i started feeling like this again, but worse, and my body dysphoria is still something i struggle with.

I don’t know why, but all of a sudden, my brain just snapped. I feel emotionless, and this time, it’s different than before. I feel emotionally numb, I can’t feel anything. I just feel blank, and even now as i’m typing this i feel blank. I know i love people, but i can’t feel the love, I know i was sad but i don’t feel the sadness anymore, i just feel...empty and numb. My brain doesn’t comprehend anything i suppose.

If i has to draw it out, i would say it’s a dark squiggle or cloud and it’s all over, and i feel comfort but i know i shouldn’t. This is nothing like before.

Reddit, please help me. I don’t know what this is or why i feel like this, can someone please help me and give me information or help on what to do. I’m just a teenager, I don’t know why i feel like this",1.8530430136254308,3.939748725888328,3.4283034998664164,88.95064654020838,79.50761421319797,6.583916644402884,23.82019770237777,7.669130373188453,1.1427370558375634,1514,53,318,24,38,500,158,394,0.16,0.695,0.145,-0.8836,2,0,1,0,0,0,67.0,0,0,1,3,18,25,2,1,12,0,31,14,7,2,3,84,75,38,0,5,24,0,24,6,0,3,5,1,0,2,26,14,0,0,35,0,0,2,12,14,0,2,13,25,57,11,28,59,3,33,0,3,0,2,11,13,0,13,22,207,83,1,0.06039435217710387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19318936646460605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05989496891315066,0.0,0.0,0.09939881181890482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0567424819308914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670081703634304,0.15417343634547492,0.0,0.0,0.10682779321135373,0.0,0.20125353100998344,0.0,0.2022602119233486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261984874849272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358710346833462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03988990002027611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.610743982159718,0.12943721178805548,0.2899402459458901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03155355632757555,0.057935765801277225,0.03432350213064022,0.0,0.048302880565098204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214431836180192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655292520622163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0656186403519129,0.0,0.0,0.17703377902302336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901652158554892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04820619571203499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046579847592693964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0579500097586168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04092477605332508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057653242916437586,0.08373967888297777,0.05273401880228847,0.0,0.1325897252137643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.070597765778089,0.0,0.0,0.06423682762810243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0620954527032138,0.059632136745954877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04802801290303277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054980749968799786,0.06300448083950723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234387722515913,0.046494522907020525,0.05973155858274221,0.0,0.08549486663795768,0.0,0.09646201532640047,0.0,0.0,0.06313728991521897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040123323992212884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408657297319361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05899650643443289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587645126496903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16348952729782099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06154700450232296,0.04290241498799854,0.0,0.0,0.03889198269543878
mentalhealth,Shanski188,2020/04/13,"My mental health only gets questioned when I get betrayed or hurt emotionally by the one I’ve been bangin for years!!! It’s when you called it.. but your CRAZY... 
Cheaters  and liars turn us loyal women into nut bars....",4.817723577235771,6.270732073170732,4.705853658536586,85.66577235772358,69.73170731707317,6.442276422764228,23.422764227642283,6.42735559955562,0.5951886178861785,169,4,32,1,3,52,38,41,0.29600000000000004,0.623,0.081,-0.8772,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,1,2,0,0,2,3,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,5,1,3,3,0,4,0,1,0,0,6,1,0,2,3,18,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2944194118138754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243349144993187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012833461526007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3064836436436284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30866558157978125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905710393084164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953813595825347,0.2192896294621528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3229980498848002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3136226349445784,0.0,0.0,0.34682813300303955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18567648228530387
mentalhealth,autumntial,2020/04/13,"Loved one falling apart Hello,  thanks for anyone's time if ya read. See if I can get some insight. Girlfriend has schizo effective disorder...she wasnt taking her medicine for 3 months and everything was fine then something triggered her 4 days ago.

Now shes convinced the neighbors are constantly talking smack. She took her medicine last night rexvuli? But it's hard for her to deal. I dont know what I should do. I dont want her committed but I'm so worried. 

Nothings escalated but she barely slept last night. Is this an episode that will go away?",2.390461538461537,5.231383152380952,2.3942857142857186,92.2826373626374,84.14285714285714,5.516483516483516,27.124542124542128,7.010146845296331,1.4045091575091582,441,20,85,6,13,132,80,105,0.08800000000000001,0.8109999999999999,0.10099999999999999,0.3055,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,2,4,0,0,2,0,12,2,1,2,1,14,23,8,0,4,5,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,4,2,13,4,5,17,1,16,0,0,1,1,15,2,0,3,11,46,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16443991120373902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12971013603361448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17428903057544345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20046612644836706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11963604893187972,0.19124858115946247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4348233933837957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16672086678478906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691924914808528,0.0,0.10542735722398236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16617697427320974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194926789532843,0.30242436267247685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16742644326867334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14806915088087844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34816970305362754,0.0,0.1779980480051614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570369328466027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18555624004731386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14782429591645915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14281161219563618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139477455176359,0.14910272768892352,0.0,0.17078903762936978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817006341995884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20610403551298945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094162683801651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18839038776784664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AreuFrenchClyde,2020/04/13,"Help pls! 9yo has something going on in her noggin. PLEASE HELP. TL/DR - can't figure out what's causing these mental issues with 9yo & info about medicine albilify 

My best friend(Fleur)s 9YO daughter has been having some issues - let's call her L. Only way to see someone recently was telehealth bc the covid-19. She needs some advice so I thought I'd reach out on here.

A few months ago L started having night terrors and wetting the bed. Had some clinical tests done but found nothing conclusive. A few weeks ago she unfortunately stumbled upon a rather scary (for her age & mind) video on YouTube with the share your story collection. 
Here's the link - about a girl who gets acid thrown on her face. 

https://youtu.be/F8u7cW1-Nxw

She has been TERRIFIED every since. Started thinking how sad and crazy that must be for that girl and if she was that girl would she want to die?
L then started thinking god could hear her every thought & she was afraid God thought she herself (L) wanted to die and that's not what she meant & now she is terrified that God thinks she wants to kill herself. (They're not really a religious family - go to church at Christmas Eve mainly but the twins went to a vacation bible school last summer)
She starts chanting ""amen"" ""amen"" ""amen"" ""amen"" quickly over and over again. 
L had also been mouthing the chanting of amens when she has been sleeping at night. She has also been very afraid of something harmful happening to her parents or her identical twin. Like very paranoid, and really scared.

As the covid-19 is going around she was recommended to a psychiatrist via telehealth after talking to her primary doctor suggested she call the crisis hotline for an essential psych evaluation. 
It was a short meeting (an hour). The doctor recommended she starts taking albilify 2mg once a day.
Albilify says it's to treat schizophrenia, bi-polar, and tourette syndrome.
The Dr never diagnosed L with anything. 
Apparently there wasn't a lot of time left and Fleur didn't get to ask a lot of questions. 

She's wondering if this is insinuating that L has schizophrenia, bi-polar, or tourettes? She also was thinking possibly OCD. 
Is this the kind of thing that will be with L forever or is this just temporary growing pains?

Do any of you have kids going through anything similar or have been a kid through it yourself?

Fluer is scared for her little girl & wants to make sure she's looking into every option.",5.486126126126127,7.703354729729733,5.0596396396396415,80.75450450450452,69.27027027027026,7.906306306306307,30.8018018018018,8.59863814320734,2.5387099099099104,1956,82,337,33,36,596,244,444,0.141,0.778,0.081,-0.9923,2,0,2,0,0,1,76.0,0,2,0,2,17,15,1,5,25,0,42,9,3,3,3,63,76,24,3,11,12,2,1,1,0,3,6,2,1,6,18,16,0,0,15,1,0,6,6,9,0,0,23,6,34,6,46,46,9,50,6,1,2,0,53,17,0,14,27,208,52,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572923694335712,0.13739294795887164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18592312941423,0.0,0.4198401985179998,0.0,0.05270066303952427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754696590620565,0.06898881995167233,0.07244929629875134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132839061485905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826634017261668,0.0,0.0,0.0796108353462911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06187510199620992,0.0,0.0,0.049979197034889414,0.0,0.0,0.07865789169240779,0.16085944064924113,0.0,0.0,0.15864306378830215,0.0,0.07930640593571713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958838640755263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305733769397978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497153391853893,0.059874041715166935,0.0,0.08097803785552657,0.0,0.1761734763596324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06853040039952253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734482681078187,0.0,0.10388930086803146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07631900038784642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16177360713079614,0.0,0.0,0.08573902247653392,0.0807012696980655,0.0,0.06317045299099165,0.0,0.0,0.08420079003585436,0.07924600158219224,0.0,0.037861152402296205,0.07767242033200795,0.0,0.0,0.06507801813487818,0.0,0.0,0.1317704700637671,0.0,0.0,0.051729893989098684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780988160192522,0.0,0.07824994572745088,0.0,0.061857419504700764,0.0,0.0,0.05746309320985541,0.05977051560380564,0.0,0.0,0.14545149514595204,0.0,0.07436052588247145,0.0,0.0,0.08253184711159853,0.0,0.058940011595982174,0.08246234322475189,0.0,0.08605132173065698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506850762041382,0.0,0.08736629888072267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08681445106356678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09929321107669184,0.0,0.07651900433485788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06162877817339105,0.1551761670553283,0.0784311691628338,0.061755128810374586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410637464509322,0.0,0.07755303444299058,0.0,0.06566301337147155,0.11932205666303874,0.0,0.0,0.2742641144467186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304006849610473,0.0,0.0582681497460138,0.062289206908256615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051485607761612026,0.1986279653260627,0.0,0.184572044046338,0.045189162975625384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12788639282910427,0.1828391119572454,0.06151356458355162,0.062163472586779386,0.0,0.0,0.07184055750779582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404226334497064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055051692888821765,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,9yr_old,2020/04/13,"Stuck in an abusive household and it's impacting my health severely Probably a great heads up would be to simply state that , I live in India the society is designed in a family integrated way , that till one grabs a permanent job you are completely dependent on your family for everything 

My dad is abusive asf ever since I've been born he's been like this hitler figure , who dictates everything that goes in the house and if anything remotely goes wrong , the accused had to face his wrath he always wants things to go as he dictates and that too step by step , never accepts the slightest of errors , he's been really abusive to my mom cursing her , cursing my old grandparents calling them names also been really disrespectful to my mom and she's become so weak so vulnerable that if he starts getting angry she starts shaking with fear it's too much to bear with , in indian society divorces are just not an option the society is built in such a way that if you are divorced everyone questions the character of the female she is shunned and disrespected throughout , so despite all of the abuse she recieves she has to stick around this monstrous figure 

When college started , I moved out in the dorms and despite them being located in the same city as my house I never liked coming here , I only visited once an year for merely 2-3 days then went off again but bcoz of all this quarantine shit I'm back here it's been a complete sob train no day goes by without my dad raging out and raising hell in the house the worst part is standing up to the abuse , he's a severe egomaniac and won't take no standing up , he starts to throw objects around the house and raise ruckus and chaos , I already suffer from severe anxiety issues and this is raising it to hell ranges , I'm too anxious and scared 

Today I was editing a video on my laptop for a youtube channel and he saw me do it , he threatened me like : I'll see how you take this laptop back with you , and when I bought it off my own savings and he can't do that , he started shouting at me severely again raising hell and threw my mouse out and broke it into two halves then he started calling me a pathetic failure in life and how I'm a parasite and a worthless existence then he started to cuss me calling me demented , an abomination also telling me that he should have gotten me aborted 

All of this is too much for me ;-; idk what to do where to go , I never want to come home again , I want to go away as far as I can go never to face these walls again I just feel like shit severely shit ....",7.653734939759039,6.587502670682732,7.722575100401608,75.17523614457835,63.45783132530121,10.859566265060243,36.58666666666667,9.98439552973466,3.507772594377512,2022,83,382,36,25,656,244,498,0.255,0.72,0.025,-0.9991,2,1,0,0,4,0,30.0,0,5,2,0,28,24,7,3,29,0,29,9,6,3,8,63,59,40,0,8,8,4,2,4,0,3,3,2,2,0,25,30,0,0,5,2,1,14,10,17,0,2,13,6,44,7,62,41,9,77,3,4,2,0,42,28,7,6,34,259,69,6,0.0,0.3932401610326775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07325066437502357,0.10616621629518193,0.05523248509800613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050779605832458455,0.07498915817631649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054624102496776385,0.11818242309089537,0.0,0.0,0.06236507443492384,0.10208241085771648,0.0,0.0,0.07331017745061158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033405512853067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435892966838565,0.13919383290990722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856176785435412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06004343138412582,0.0,0.06342779489493326,0.11931398358874525,0.0,0.12515206375891982,0.07469461252344023,0.033563119387747815,0.0474210331372926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03468018708544526,0.0,0.1508984233613002,0.0,0.0,0.07318286929197898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812380648862454,0.07055756805626025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06658335583346509,0.0,0.0,0.30636892534602755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06928222897661185,0.06587072374260869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04688531459028788,0.12971732912815462,0.0,0.05861370288670124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15548411350587385,0.0,0.07055016713217452,0.0975921218924994,0.0,0.2047817129905464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965339205458182,0.0706912633137421,0.04497999766571212,0.05048407403038783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07188177964597542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156758111560453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743594555841477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504792725647076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645676589845671,0.0,0.052895315256972414,0.0,0.0,0.3749457908815824,0.20441067515038736,0.05490923526766457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3288828297748597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099817204161935,0.0,0.05801800327000525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044099130002782594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06291934776932713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484244943083457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745582093246268,0.1053768149757458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061533819308836564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639868014217089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715360014430177,0.07257480536954251,0.0,0.042745775531583374
mentalhealth,handsomecookie69,2020/04/13,"There’s a ongoing battle in my head 
Idk how to word this but in the past I might have had depression (cutting and almost killing myself) recently I’ve been getting better (stopped cutting) but I keep telling myself I’m worthless and should die than I try reminding myself that my friends like me and I have my gf with me. Then the cycle continues of negative thoughts to positive ones, idk what’s happening I feel so empty",4.1260846560846565,6.323126617283955,4.801869488536156,81.24555555555557,72.95061728395062,8.579188712522045,32.55908289241623,9.23628265651192,3.2303601410934735,340,17,61,8,7,109,60,81,0.305,0.5429999999999999,0.151,-0.9474,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,9,4,0,3,0,6,1,1,1,0,15,12,8,2,1,2,0,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,6,0,1,3,1,13,3,7,7,0,7,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,2,6,43,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599189418651452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22956599373943504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22356475050104327,0.0,0.2693896545205122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124491761004972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005408864695272,0.0,0.13561308900244629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2295343165843197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663907149567977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23071515209026644,0.2871725221803309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681136679622232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753596588012328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758893748681669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24778615385656755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25629118264770223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21700970622683285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2268730737182649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20606727206106876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762290127080776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,short_demon_ash,2020/04/13,"Quarantine is crippling me i have to deal with depression, anxiety, adhd, other things that have gone undiagnosed. the support i got from friends was barely enough to keep me going and now they've been taken away from me. the one person i have is constantly stressing me out with their unhealthy habits, whether they overwork themselves or their mental health starts to plummet. basically everyone in my life is just about depressed as me and it's usually manageable but as of right now i can't even handle myself. im struggling to find a reason to hold on, i stay for the people i love but i feel like im just a burden to them, like they'd be better off without me. i keep trying new meds and none of it seems to work, i still feel awful, im so frequently on the verge of tears, i get so depressed i get angry and start snapping at people. i can't afford a therapist to help with my issues and the closest i can get is a pediatrician i have an appointment with tomorrow. everything feels so heavy and i don't know how much longer i can hold it all...",2.928972672064777,5.072452798076924,4.223704453441297,84.27919028340081,76.30769230769229,7.263562753036437,25.370445344129557,8.20500826718156,1.6904,834,30,161,15,19,274,127,208,0.152,0.74,0.10800000000000001,-0.8124,1,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,5,2,11,12,0,2,10,1,17,3,0,2,1,31,35,16,0,0,7,0,3,2,1,0,2,0,0,1,6,11,0,4,7,0,0,2,5,6,0,1,5,3,30,6,29,28,4,23,0,3,0,1,10,10,0,2,12,116,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14991652048175086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542784714655518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11719990127720373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032480772766493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13480257565034814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860427737356614,0.3223221921323365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288925861024789,0.0,0.08239139680262561,0.0,0.0,0.11919702441265885,0.11211072242190877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18922101742556105,0.0891162313604394,0.0,0.0,0.11401259547311295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637592389401656,0.0,0.1955187838473765,0.0,0.07089416825471824,0.0,0.09976815678469808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325956889409649,0.0,0.0,0.08361242257112984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4042306636407586,0.1301990011219562,0.0,0.2217541403201756,0.0,0.0,0.06855534219890927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881094794020683,0.12188599392778733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258518426257501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13856105198679886,0.0,0.1257113322112276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170025975972147,0.0,0.0,0.1204773061223333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08452890233252475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17296180505503592,0.108920540435749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282563024903201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652960998513032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11356109654029595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765870929276591,0.13295915281614565,0.09961970545299204,0.0,0.14289237595159612,0.13040818612739175,0.0,0.0,0.1415565719322027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14483592427605846,0.08287352704324571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08469212545967363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738649376549678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024754043216238,0.0,0.09081419324476347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,samehdw,2020/04/13,"How can I get better? I know that there is no simple solution. I am wondering how I can go about my days less focused on my anxiety? Or just ways in which you all ease your minds on a daily basis? I have anxiety and for the past couple of months it seems as though it’s taken over my life. I can feel and hear my heart beat constantly (and it’s always quite rapid) and my mind is never at ease anymore. Every little thing makes me feel like I’m suffocating and this will never pass. Help? 

Note, Things I do to help myself already:
I am on an SSRI. I try to exercise daily. I recently got a job so that’s helped take my mind off of things, but of course, coronavirus has meant I’m homebound. I talk to a therapist once a week. Corona has moved this to phone calls which is less effective for me.",2.1470818815331043,3.7945993353658563,3.800522648083625,88.67914634146345,76.98780487804878,7.3686411149825775,20.860627177700348,8.192908349453996,0.895945644599303,617,15,134,11,14,206,107,164,0.038,0.852,0.11,0.8777,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,4,7,2,0,0,6,0,13,3,1,4,3,24,28,12,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,12,5,0,0,7,1,0,3,3,0,0,0,3,3,22,2,18,24,3,20,0,0,0,0,9,8,0,3,9,90,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526674980498572,0.0,0.11511438678314248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116675784593353,0.0,0.13720138047714905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235519082728033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126603711456762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14950214015710694,0.0,0.0,0.15307646245815304,0.0,0.08922128477333126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165618967893296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399030986925288,0.0988339224739967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227971840814029,0.0,0.07862483211173744,0.0,0.11064738850042613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592522746857918,0.16393986735965138,0.27818985040450944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13728638059897674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603096846253242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09771738911654633,0.06758853404494755,0.1386583527670174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923465737089312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4190679986138792,0.0,0.11042591254756708,0.14703917834690475,0.0,0.0,0.21340087516865336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1473332480486351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13206625966514013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714727443682232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13659931094063502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12594438117709833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401846148258573,0.11119672578947053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062957659702176,0.27573144494218976,0.0,0.1359235720389904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939273893661891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10981207359735062,0.11097226884802608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15002959542672287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coldfire334,2020/04/13,"It feels like something is crawling under my skin Hi, so all day today i've been feeling this weird tingly sensation as if something very very small was crawling on or under my skin. After some google search I found a bunch of causes for this. Apparently it's mainly linked with the brain. I take adderall but occasionally as my psychiatrist said I should take it only when needed. I've been taking it almost everyday for the past 2 weeks but did not take it today. I was actually feeling really lazy today and tired. Could this sensation be linked to adderall? 

Any help is appreciated 

Thanks!",5.91209090909091,7.5980190727272765,6.39977272727273,73.6696590909091,67.36363636363636,8.772727272727273,28.29545454545455,9.188382445141503,2.4858181818181815,478,16,81,9,8,155,76,110,0.076,0.7809999999999999,0.14300000000000002,0.7854,1,0,2,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,10,4,3,1,1,20,21,9,0,4,5,0,5,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,8,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,6,7,2,11,11,4,13,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,4,10,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.15653131872985546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062159298068324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908032730565703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17906408813831232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16477925467725948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806966722137125,0.0,0.0,0.10344741141019377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2433154842721944,0.11459276186646865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17587487892793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10751552531456583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836536882115695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11893764999930992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219945895456232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531239180392172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275901040706344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15258108556311925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24697391351275716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4824158543146556,0.0,0.0,0.14767859685884802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843609821559085,0.4561331560311725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2647004569425708,0.0,0.0,0.12866653937800904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DarthScil,2020/04/13,"Escapism I'm always gaming. I spend my entire day grinding and running through things. I'm like an unstoppable force. I miss my life because of this, it just breezes by because I'm not paying attention to it.

It all feels so fake to me. Nothing feels real nowadays and i can't tell if I'm dreaming or awake. For me, gaming feels like hiding from a war in a bunker and i don't know how to stop.

(I have severe MDD and dissociative ptsd disorder)",1.3866666666666667,3.7778076666666682,2.9977777777777765,89.60000000000002,83.44444444444446,5.377777777777778,24.555555555555557,6.742157984588678,0.9640222222222228,350,14,70,4,10,115,63,90,0.198,0.748,0.054000000000000006,-0.9059999999999999,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,3,5,1,0,3,0,3,1,0,1,1,17,12,8,1,1,4,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,5,3,2,1,3,3,0,0,0,3,9,2,9,12,1,4,0,1,0,0,3,1,0,2,4,40,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21315502596023747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31231926852033826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16520928272755378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2935944798947425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3885836879351385,0.18300881322839085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14078503573096726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18094135056413546,0.2503046948615627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458032516150845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994505170455836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915789990506404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894006295289097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21417066021530684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2239049894502312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701888152214673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_seekinghope,2020/04/13,"I've come so far, but I don't think I can do this anymore. I have been struggling with mental health issues for quite some time now, and I feel hopeless. I wanted to briefly share my story to see if anyone has any advice for me. 

I am in my last year of nursing school and I will be graduating in December. I have been struggling with depression since 6th grade, which is when I began self-harming. I had a horrible experience in high school and was extremely suicidal. However, despite the dark thoughts, I never acted on my suicidal impulses; I chose to harm myself instead. My mom dragged me to a counselor for about a month, who told me I simply need to exercise more and pray. I told her I felt ""better"" just to get out. By my senior year, things started to look up, and I was excited to attend college. My first few semesters of college went fairly well. I managed to maintain a near 4.0 GPA. Things slowly started to get worse. I had an abusive boyfriend, my dad was dying, I was struggling in school and I felt completely alone. My depression was at an all-time high. In March of 2018, I attempted suicide in my dorm room. I was found and taken to the emergency room. I was in the hospital for 7 days, and then I was forced to drop out of school to participate in a 7-week intensive outpatient program. After all of this, I had to have a meeting with several school advisors, the dean of students, and a few family members in a conference room. I distinctly remember one advisor saying, ""I don't think they should let you back into the nursing program after what you did... I mean, an overdose... I'll have to discuss this with your nursing professors."" I felt like I was being punished for a crime. I had to sign a contract stating that I wouldn't tell any friends if I was having suicidal thoughts, but instead report to campus safety or the nearest emergency room. They had to ""protect the other students."" I also had to meet with a school-appointed counselor, who I disliked immensely. If I violated any conditions, I would be expelled. I hated every part of it. But I was passionate about becoming a nurse and I did not want to give up.

I returned to school in the fall, a semester behind, but determined to do well. I succeeded in my classes and started to feel better, until the following spring. I turned 21 and started drinking more, which did not go well with my medications. I once again attempted suicide and was taken to the emergency room. Another awkward meeting with school officials, and I was back in school. Around this time, I began having these euphoric episodes. I felt on top of the world. I would stay up all night doing the stupidest things, like singing the same song in the mirror for 7 hours straight, or rearranging/cleaning my entire dorm. I would walk around campus at night hearing voices. I would go to the practice rooms at midnight and play my instruments until the sun came up. I hardly slept at all, and this affected my school performance greatly, because eventually I would crash into a depression and feel like complete shit. I was soon diagnosed with bipolar disorder.

Anyway, I'm sorry for the lengthy background information. Fast forward to right now. I have been drowning this entire school year. My dad passed away last semester and I kind of went into a state of numbness. I am officially the worst student in my class. I cannot concentrate on anything to save my life. 80% of my assignments are late. I feel like a zombie. I have all the time in the world and yet I can't get anything done. I have tried the ""tips and tricks."" I set alarms, I make to-do lists, I lock myself in a room hoping to get stuff done... and I am still unsuccessful. My nursing program is extremely competitive and I am holding on for dear life. I have no energy, no motivation, no ambition. I feel like I can literally sleep all day. I can't focus on anything for more than 2 minutes. I don't have the energy to reply to simple texts, emails, phone calls. The worst part is that I know I have a million important things to do, but I just... don't care. I feel dead. I feel helpless. And I don't know what to do. I see a psychiatrist and therapist, but I don't seem to be improving.

Anyway, I just wanted to try to put it in words. Thank you for reading. Any comments are appreciated.",3.8307656168435713,5.890629168087699,4.909112406472944,80.75656577344702,73.39707673568819,8.199345745606403,29.998973377414302,8.922882184376627,2.6752497859752915,3381,150,622,72,70,1108,359,821,0.207,0.674,0.11900000000000001,-0.9983,1,1,1,0,0,3,132.0,0,4,2,10,25,42,5,5,45,0,79,13,3,3,7,107,137,41,8,15,16,3,12,5,1,8,8,4,9,0,23,41,1,2,23,6,0,14,16,19,3,3,45,19,111,23,112,79,16,116,1,5,3,1,29,56,1,8,48,452,134,37,0.0,0.0598585852434439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04936809236528772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052324048944503786,0.0,0.04040126198828763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13742281346862872,0.05297519693017008,0.0,0.0,0.050102805866054284,0.03532514007873312,0.0,0.12472231296506098,0.08994799295531845,0.0,0.0,0.04746571553720832,0.07769436209333554,0.0,0.03079685562548622,0.05579597331330023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08936263398230547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05158712549686637,0.057782045231559075,0.0515090631608532,0.0,0.0,0.043518976558292274,0.10593966153811793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0651631447813702,0.0,0.1305398154465742,0.051277290239093234,0.05243235006936681,0.0,0.057900922044259326,0.0,0.0,0.10340011682203863,0.0,0.049490901222975635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042565738521760016,0.0,0.0,0.04941878763714755,0.047626274089307134,0.0,0.17881294046137716,0.10827566341112836,0.1940305854596536,0.0,0.0,0.042972750198662285,0.0,0.055393170514160026,0.03903204813602359,0.0,0.10557959947230333,0.048463910730993764,0.05742398051456324,0.0,0.0,0.0556990797731582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04525648552661984,0.04987857938597482,0.0,0.05370097742527862,0.05694032650626075,0.0,0.0,0.10675546019425712,0.0,0.05017830096065717,0.04975256073412915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273032385809266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05260937383312127,0.055529541166982783,0.08236197494896064,0.056989375850430436,0.0,0.0,0.05166068065119436,0.07136831072132578,0.12340893321365705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04242453430021462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03372285642347783,0.0,0.0,0.05503168466105863,0.0,0.050894134565976135,0.05091282731056571,0.0,0.0,0.05916905230287031,0.04032501742848065,0.0,0.0,0.03746034434892221,0.038964559186785576,0.0,0.0,0.09482021920286147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05380273215126599,0.03423402911661405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941765518277063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050787102101465115,0.0,0.05373481884211079,0.050534217082739835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05722992966612219,0.0431442698222432,0.0,0.040175965532301336,0.0,0.5624243813639436,0.08051666770183254,0.04599200720934043,0.052703947083947385,0.05707383631981236,0.0518586139617897,0.04179111730717517,0.0,0.050557030839404785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05655361451557985,0.1430348085468425,0.053848179536537866,0.04034577290085085,0.0,0.0,0.15844513004679675,0.057833937669340675,0.2763063848341303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044157183555107775,0.046512530652238426,0.0,0.058658247202749335,0.13425442231033574,0.06474305125958614,0.0,0.08021533986356337,0.0883768090794056,0.0,0.0,0.09654909248210128,0.0,0.06860026828524884,0.05495184617029182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08939498004427197,0.0,0.040524534252293895,0.0,0.13627211304951567,0.09366610365482456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051484751961195147,0.17944173010970815,0.0,0.0,0.0976007247734462
mentalhealth,anonymous12345654,2020/04/13,"Very scared to bring up hearing voices to my therapist I don't really know why I'm posting, I think I need advice or maybe just encouragement. I won't get too deep into it because there is a lot to unravel about my mental health and most of it doesn't even make sense to me. I am not a danger to myself or others I'm just getting overwhelmed

I got assessed recently at a local hospital and did an out patient program for 2 months (I discharged 2ish weeks ago) I initially went in because I was having panic attacks caused by the voices, but I couldn't talk about them. I went in telling myself that I will tell them and get help for them but I could only talk about the panic attacks being random and about my trauma. I feel like I wanted to talk about the voices but they would tell me I am going to be put away for life or that no one will believe me and I felt like I physically couldn't talk about them. 90% of the time they're just there and not threatening but with this isolation and quarentine its getting overwhelming even when they're just talking to me normally. The IOP program helped quite a bit with processing my trauma so that's what I made myself focus on while in the program. I've seen therapists most of my life for depression and anxiety but I can't talk about the voices (I told 1 therapist when I was around 15 and she immediately told my mom who said I was saying this for attention) I see an individual therapist and psychiatrist now but I can't tell them about it. I don't know if any of this even makes sense I feel all over the place, I need help I want it to stop. I am really really scared no one will believe me. I don't know why I'm posting this, I'm scared and I just want to tell them. I'm sorry if this post isn't for this forum or if this didn't make any sense. I don't know what I'm doing",3.5422212475633543,4.486795571052632,4.928362573099417,84.7961306042885,72.23684210526315,8.261208576998051,25.12670565302145,8.626192665926032,1.5343167641325532,1447,42,308,25,27,484,168,380,0.139,0.794,0.067,-0.9827,1,1,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,7,1,24,16,3,7,14,0,29,3,0,5,1,66,67,28,0,13,20,1,3,2,0,5,3,7,0,0,19,16,0,1,9,0,0,5,16,13,0,2,14,12,55,3,42,43,5,32,0,3,2,0,30,14,0,11,12,209,74,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341190325920423,0.06659434460958427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10217601900959987,0.0,0.05747090687613207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06687774472159247,0.0,0.17093251574518853,0.0705830091907003,0.0,0.0,0.09159178236571093,0.0,0.0,0.16928173418399775,0.0,0.0,0.08201773851866423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717472377541262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05998170832351968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647056012895252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885932465078378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597155894316919,0.05366977026949032,0.07213239304293215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15700017908846922,0.0,0.042695630925954825,0.0,0.060084834974543484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985503937440401,0.0846720531572388,0.0,0.1510653932251055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16514834213220994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612691865182748,0.07340518324562803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06386913028040016,0.0,0.07108569443750654,0.15044083869392755,0.0,0.07547380019981484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570897261981005,0.0,0.0,0.08798623838767801,0.059964566920694976,0.0,0.0,0.1114094162298721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07360717383188313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10181415214855466,0.05713643242724064,0.0,0.17628749720406767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849030126008412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21584878155314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552201528673258,0.0,0.07990536262368524,0.0,0.0,0.14438222079228125,0.0,0.07417750357002596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07146168463226703,0.05974292207158975,0.2256416060124943,0.0,0.0598654063473248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409700028626739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06280839665287445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36229884912706295,0.3283155913095209,0.0,0.0,0.34890662066825645,0.0,0.048137474916048834,0.0,0.0,0.043806363230786835,0.0,0.0,0.1435715316811325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619865185328685,0.13293314188261002,0.0,0.060261254701539035,0.0,0.0,0.1392844367834933,0.13557840516387468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053367097249804214,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ejelius,2020/04/13,"a bunch of thoughts. Hello everyone. I am writing this here, hence I won't be able to see a therapist any soon, at least not until I fully finance myself and not being have to explain therapy to my family. If you read it, and if you can relate to any of it please let me know. Sincerely, have a nice day.

During my pre-teenage times the age 12-14, I was in rebel emo phase. Again, I had no emotional problem, I rarely feel upset or sad. I was just into it because I liked the music. And I was highly influenced by the so said ""culture"" of those interests. When I like something, I become really obsessed with it and search for every detail. So later, I got into history and I finally found my obsession. I was also interested in writing and I wrote many depressing poems, demon themed, death themed things. It was consuming all over me. And the point here is that, I literally had no problem in my life to cause those feelings. I was feeling super numb, writing sad poetry not because I felt sad, but to write those things. My online friends that period weren't good either, they often self harmed, etc. I never had any of those, thankfully. As the time passed, things got worse for me. I am sure many of you played a game, where a man's house was filled with same picture of an island, looking for dumb details to prove his conspiracy, I was in that state. And my family didn't want me to talk with my so called 'online friends', I understand why so well and I am very grateful they did. But that time, I was totally consumed by the darkness I created. I attempted s#cide, but thankfully failed. 

After that attempt, as soon as I opened my eyes, I did a 180 degrees turn personalitywise. I was way more talkative, energetic, still into history and that music style but as a cheerful girl. I literally disliked my whole middle school but in high school I was one of the most popular girls honestly. My high school was science high school, where you are with bunch of hard working students and everyone knows everyone. I was really friendly and in high school I got rid of my history obsession and changed my music style, but it happened slowly and not by force. I was basically disinterested. This happened when I wrote 400 pages book defending, romanticing a war criminal, actually wanting to publish it but THANK GOD my computer crashed so I couldn't. I can't even imagine if the book went published, I would be so disgusted now. Quick note, after my personality turn, I also felt disgusted by history, because it reminded me my own self. Anyway, since the 11th grade, everything seemed to be fine. 

In present time, I am 18 years old, female. I am actually very spoiled in family, my parents are very chill people. We get along well. I never had a boyfriend or a girlfriend to this age either. Nor I had long relationships with anyone, my online friends and I often lose connection after 3 years or less. We moved out of city a lot and few months ago we moved again. Since we changed city, my mood decreased. And I was worried to turn into my old self. So before things happened, I wanted to write everything out. I really hope I can talk with some people here. Those last weeks, my mood got horribly low that I actually found myself reading some history things again, talking like my old self, definetly not nice things.

o no.",4.468755980861243,6.343831826156304,5.447968421052632,78.33847894736844,71.2488038277512,8.907547049441787,29.445901116427432,9.439034500452443,2.819646532695375,2613,106,475,61,50,858,299,627,0.14300000000000002,0.713,0.14300000000000002,0.2497,1,0,1,0,0,0,96.0,4,4,2,6,31,48,5,4,21,0,45,3,1,2,6,100,82,47,2,11,21,1,6,3,5,2,2,1,0,8,29,35,0,0,15,6,1,5,16,20,2,1,37,10,88,26,61,37,19,71,1,7,3,0,42,27,1,14,40,335,117,17,0.05816645827263878,0.0,0.17028621798484847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051561055695428536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303139133133334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866555871471696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040671340061747364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10637319924436164,0.06424028325559578,0.04949537182793147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059394457296270575,0.0,0.0,0.059752975334345065,0.12306480051064354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0375125535948198,0.0,0.05009868527807754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542943656547137,0.0,0.0,0.06487097658284458,0.03841839710814475,0.0,0.04900774979347255,0.16674163064494205,0.1045525242011341,0.0,0.164502480531678,0.0,0.08823212702749954,0.0,0.1116978433209446,0.06371851188365704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755303843429555,0.17975704549320962,0.0,0.030389573715422405,0.0,0.0,0.04878726551016867,0.1860841211508642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15430922085844814,0.0,0.05210572155553403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072802836260318,0.0,0.05777241753445251,0.0,0.06711628326844644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06393352856468426,0.0474134268659697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0594791444818925,0.04108468966450012,0.08525158023215043,0.0,0.0,0.05147548517958842,0.04884517535215887,0.06507338840327456,0.0,0.04945104277116562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11794331820365635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046427912052838624,0.1236434797434174,0.0,0.0,0.08972311693653574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18310773991703416,0.0,0.039415097485312085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0645869683755213,0.0,0.0,0.08065059665227245,0.05078870777878342,0.0,0.06384930412376262,0.054986104128470825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113148900302748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11636439788464585,0.0,0.1117887678202191,0.0,0.0,0.062449007995484127,0.0,0.0,0.055329621802196936,0.0,0.0,0.29433780565455325,0.04635113640655357,0.052952559032018016,0.2427212064461756,0.0,0.0,0.09623179071744274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04477938133431508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04645180871320654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05482119855020396,0.0,0.0,0.1402559875598029,0.0,0.16065557960194912,0.06651841429186654,0.0675357412339133,0.23185926166494056,0.0,0.0,0.04617767061203724,0.13566931832416895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18980521104500506,0.0,0.06055333441214428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14398025927770589,0.10292425239051163,0.046169827151045485,0.04665762427963411,0.0,0.1045972629958311,0.05392088956354495,0.052486181377223405,0.06494077341742234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04234587438165554,0.0590708618429396,0.05927659027937191,0.041319783079665384,0.0,0.0,0.07491458413066829
mentalhealth,ozymandias568813,2020/04/13,I’d like some help So I’m just gonna get right to it I have a very intense self hatred.Im very introverted. And it is damn near impossible for me to build emotional connections.I have very little self confidence and it’s getting to the point  where I’m daydreaming about hurting myself and others and I don’t know why. When ever anyone asks if I’m okay I just smile and say I’m fine. After having a rough day at work about 2 weeks ago I went home and started cutting myself in the shower it was a way of punishing myself for my failings. The thing that worries me is that nothing is really wrong with my life. I got on reddit today because I thought it would be healthy to vent and ask for some advice.,1.9064334975369448,4.010332475862072,3.585837438423649,87.8011206896552,79.41379310344827,6.349753694581281,22.77093596059113,7.447530270364453,0.9634729064039416,559,18,114,8,14,186,98,145,0.111,0.732,0.157,0.5926,1,0,0,0,0,2,8.0,0,0,0,2,8,9,3,0,6,1,10,1,0,0,1,17,24,10,0,2,3,0,1,1,0,2,1,1,2,2,9,8,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,4,2,13,3,16,17,2,18,0,2,0,0,6,8,1,3,9,70,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15670299617978528,0.14215042609786313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212819911794528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2998319343854748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775462891540147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341963339581774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18038463646021666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450557821049838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16756409636363295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825540882974484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748665491783843,0.0,0.16085524316238792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716698580139054,0.0,0.17321748975359186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881302584366551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11326777668023898,0.0783443259133449,0.16072393540245472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15387078588951625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515930584799217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273141724422404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694749027589248,0.0,0.1275255711066143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345831699327514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1135044012408112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10653677921535593,0.0,0.0,0.1273087888751248,0.0,0.0,0.1520035579217104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39694406815299776,0.0,0.12728716497105572,0.12863198944648505,0.0,0.0,0.14865633225801678,0.14470093651871307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674477967239555,0.16285446579183113,0.0,0.11391591370318804,0.17532967239409272,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,skulletons,2020/04/13,"How do I find a therapist during the pandemic? I have been thinking I need therapy for a long time and this quarantine has just made my mental health issues worse the longer it goes on, so I wanted to see if there was a way I could find a therapist. I know that might be hard given the circumstances but I was hoping someone here would have some advice. I’m in New Jersey in the US if that helps.",4.812222222222225,5.021135654320993,5.732938271604941,82.81422222222223,69.0,9.442962962962962,26.076543209876537,9.3871,1.9238869135802468,312,8,65,6,5,103,61,81,0.043,0.863,0.094,0.705,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,8,0,11,1,0,2,0,18,20,6,0,7,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,2,9,1,5,11,1,7,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,5,3,47,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854440163643304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515183288551052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34689823737216097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16999936680744904,0.0,0.0,0.2017198651863661,0.0,0.0,0.12720086711463974,0.0,0.0,0.18848744641843268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19807374706890984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10429429868060183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679431668038547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795678370576228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912465871898563,0.20131920371321732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14071430305740348,0.0,0.1832839826326014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15122454127272178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16079407924443048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170220078154138,0.4406822477028961,0.0,0.1215989000387356,0.0,0.0,0.11065818456100733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22827359855314955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193305465100584,0.15063300434141086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19339493846674424,0.13480932132717438,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alqissa,2020/04/13,"I’ve changed myself for the betterment of other people. 
I’ve always wanted to be a good friend. Always there for people. Always trying to help them out. But only recently have I realized how much I’ve pushed my feelings down for people. People make jokes at my expense in front of me, and I laugh it off in front of them so I don’t seem annoying for ruining the joke. Later, always at night when I’m all alone and other people are asleep, I let it all out. 

I’ve had a terrible year full of dental procedures, parents splitting up, fake/toxic friends, being dumped like I’m nothing, and confusing sexuality. But I don’t want to worry people about me. I want them to know that I’m there for them and they don’t need to worry about me. But I’ve only now realized that I do. I do need them to worry about me. I need someone to worry about me. 

I’ve pushed down all my feeling so everyone would think I live a happy life. It’s all a lie. It’s unhealthy. And I’ve only realized now, because the other day I was talking about my problems, and I just sat there, emotionless, writing about the worst year of my life. I was all alone. I could let it all out. But I’ve conditioned myself to not let out my emotions at that time of day, because there were people around and they would worry about me. 

I have always felt my feelings are the lowest down. Everyone else comes first. I still do. I feel like I’ve gone numb. I feel sad, and I really, really want to cry. But I can’t. Even at my time when no one would care, because no one would know, I can’t cry. I’m numb. I want my sadness back. I couldn’t handle my emotions then. But I want to try and brave them now. But I can’t. I feel sad. But I can’t let them out. 

I don’t know what’s wrong, but all I know is I want my sadness back.",0.7820419363917814,2.7786579866310177,2.8564424430059137,92.11317759639743,82.77005347593581,5.755023923444978,19.46777371235576,6.950104931194217,0.240626737967915,1373,36,304,17,38,463,140,374,0.146,0.76,0.094,-0.9529,2,2,0,0,0,0,53.0,0,0,9,2,27,26,2,1,9,0,32,5,1,2,7,71,64,24,0,17,11,1,7,2,2,4,4,0,0,0,12,16,0,0,16,2,1,6,12,14,0,3,7,7,58,12,45,45,10,43,0,5,0,0,15,18,0,2,21,208,70,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489546572446325,0.0,0.0,0.2991754294686643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401536545228237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11058908197001067,0.0,0.13150745688962762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359876951337337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07331728911360316,0.0,0.07607150608776073,0.06194431019427578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05741448062830081,0.0,0.15798005878789148,0.09275232031628672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060071783826227,0.1617786974457748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04749603976713843,0.0,0.0,0.13742664480347302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21815988846389944,0.05137269463622026,0.06904511389870653,0.0,0.0,0.061166819137888274,0.0,0.0,0.11111535649360528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060314903203227674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654979481559263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0481999225838906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807996396174287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941323974214874,0.1015846678159276,0.07026342845624503,0.0,0.06349806532427985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04800064808819365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05286230544966146,0.15996161034893694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748289522760048,0.0,0.06899982117283512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745648847963737,0.16407294912661124,0.0,0.0,0.07984781899587194,0.0,0.0,0.3489745751937396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06880839443496355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921350908517889,0.0,0.07100269333454462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546438786805299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06092931870145665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05742761593325901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05779873241429779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04607718249963683,0.0,0.0,0.08386288631676421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764467444173608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2969016865841128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3651417308319459,0.0,0.20433190430063652,0.07862256614566641,0.0,0.092615682455282
mentalhealth,ChemicalGround6,2020/04/13,"Catharsis Many of my suicidal thoughts these days seem born of a need for catharsis. As in, I don't so much want to end my life as I want to do something extreme and severe as an escape. Does anyone have any advice for things that are cathartic, distracting, etc.? I'd love to punch pillows and scream and go for jogs but I also have absolutely no energy as a result of depression, so I'm at an impass. Anything would help! Please!",2.66708823529412,4.8647401058823565,3.8243382352941175,86.56827205882351,77.35294117647058,6.602941176470589,24.742647058823533,7.645422480735847,1.3317352941176468,339,12,66,5,8,110,62,85,0.19899999999999998,0.6609999999999999,0.14,-0.5837,0,0,1,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,4,0,6,2,0,1,0,11,14,11,1,4,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,3,3,0,0,2,1,0,2,2,3,0,0,1,1,5,1,15,12,2,7,0,1,0,1,2,2,0,1,3,43,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22159905858291912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18134955582082551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542127953169431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15856431574944008,0.0,0.18661410513791107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14624923554882366,0.0,0.19531846600098526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19844978128026308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20085275931403146,0.0,0.2529108211885845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12887980284871742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200054957910716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16017583129887333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20467066203970166,0.0,0.0,0.22991130264933998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667035764711511,0.16814862888544502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24892765284083826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2064447907874771,0.0,0.25618790988729606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17458023144010135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24805185627445986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506572979082877,0.0,0.0,0.18003170616911635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675121044212279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16109238399805378,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helloitsmett,2020/04/13,"My body is breaking, mindset is breaking and covid19 is not helping at all It’s a bit long sorry 
It all began right after I graduated high school 2016.At first I thought of going to music school, I went to CC to get my general req but ended up changing my major into comp sci until last year around end of 2019.
 
Between those time I barely made effort to go out of my way to do things to make myself better didn’t fall in love, gained belly fat from chips and sodas, didn’t try to do what I love instead didn’t play guitar at all started smoking weed a lot  and drinking but around beginning of 2019 I thought of changing my life and started to work out at the gym seriously. I was so focused on getting better and being what I wished I was when finally I hurt my wrist at a show when I feel. I wasn’t aware of it then but as time passed going to doctors and physical therapy it was starting to get better but doesn’t get better at all. 

I started getting into depression due to my wrist and other stuff which I have always had to deal with. Slowly I started lashing out on people and that depression started turning into hatred towards everyone and especially myself. I cursed whoever made me who I am and why I had to be so despised by the world. I made an impulsive decision to quit my job and had to quit gym because of my wrist pain and also stopped playing guitar. This depression was very long. About 4-5 months. I had never felt like that in my life. I wanted to disappear somewhere not here.

I used the time to listen to motivational speakers, read books, meditated, home workouts, run, hike. I finally made a comeback way stronger goal oriented changed my major to accounting. Wrist was feeling so much better didn’t hurt to play guitar and small weights weren’t problem at all. All the time I was in depression I realized how much I still love playing guita. 

I finally realized everything I wanted and started to go out of my way to come out of my shell.  I am 22 yr old on my 4 th year in cc and will be transferring (hopefully if they don’t decline at the end ) on fall2020. I was ready to give my all this year to be great at guitar and maybe start lifting heavy weights and definitely get a girl. 

2 days ago my wrist started feeling pain again. Today there is pain that tells me that nothing I fine with my wrist. I am afraid. I am scared. It may never go away. I am losing hope. I will go to see doctor again if I can. It’s been almost a year and this thing still hasn’t gone. On top of that my eyes got worse too. Seeing doubles and sensitive to light can’t look at screens. 

Now in quarantine I can’t even pass time by watching movies. So all I have is me and my mind majority of the times if I’m not reading books. I am scared I might go into depression. I worked so hard to snap out of it. I don’t know what to do. I jst wanna cut my wrist.",3.2453927203065116,4.662709612068966,4.5935632183908055,85.08553639846747,73.56896551724137,7.4314176245210755,27.71647509578544,8.021203637495839,1.733211877394636,2245,86,456,33,45,745,269,580,0.149,0.726,0.125,-0.9504,2,1,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,1,16,22,35,2,3,13,0,49,24,10,8,10,87,105,39,0,10,10,0,7,1,0,4,8,2,1,1,25,35,5,1,11,17,1,15,17,18,0,1,29,16,69,17,85,68,16,109,0,8,6,3,11,39,0,9,51,306,94,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051307146653192914,0.0,0.0579584806382483,0.0,0.0,0.04628663216849625,0.048160814441672466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030509805714556,0.0,0.0,0.05438018535960979,0.0,0.0,0.0352831237968857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559508766054172,0.06318999252880557,0.06429165561191698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836881639393586,0.04985851335255435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03732782548119589,0.059671760516862266,0.2492598879159855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848530889277968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05670038577654704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537935576679555,0.0,0.0,0.03822920822745971,0.0,0.0,0.05530684080136775,0.05201883107122544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08779763369593745,0.0,0.05557389730308776,0.19021420273370346,0.0,0.04923271659907027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1814395334985472,0.05552379057126139,0.2302618498834667,0.0,0.046291940520548684,0.063812927881592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05184913034193839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03879575825776281,0.06115342039838539,0.058058380670529035,0.1149758420951979,0.0,0.0,0.12392351993357345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05743699016398174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031809346045014966,0.047179942550292384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176474160145322,0.028277254802699138,0.0,0.0,0.1024439950475087,0.048604640484821035,0.06475293876349017,0.0,0.04920752434939883,0.15671693718744215,0.219069902757136,0.03863536370217942,0.0,0.058148261057717074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06140155595688061,0.058442321832187866,0.0,0.04619928084032096,0.0,0.08509695091744872,0.0,0.08928128132280584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553744152578473,0.0,0.06073534594761296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18476527070944526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04012671903527885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05538336357195375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12312505461372004,0.11579136902752266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049429221988646216,0.0,0.0,0.1158959972613936,0.1171553433622662,0.09224576654135658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647919452031088,0.36870999321608255,0.0,0.0924461196462996,0.04839028955106129,0.0,0.0,0.06625877678109555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05058968983207926,0.0,0.06619084871672301,0.0,0.07690582863814954,0.0,0.0,0.0919005433942149,0.20250183547582026,0.0,0.05486349251410042,0.0,0.0,0.039296735157678835,0.06295684257094396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0499897547423594,0.0,0.0477570793065366,0.06827827243315368,0.13782740058217713,0.0,0.14096454609094616,0.0,0.05365535967396228,0.05222771661415072,0.0,0.06655916809551406,0.0,0.0,0.08427468979266514,0.0,0.05898468659233853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490913443339733
mentalhealth,hip_hop_anonymous88,2020/04/13,"Suffering from anxiety and recently prescribed to an SSRI I (28f) have been suffering from anxiety for quite some time (at least the last 3+ years), and have never been prescribed to medication. I’ve tried a variety of techniques to reduce my symptoms - exercise, meditation, etc. and I was briefly in therapy after my dad passed somewhat suddenly 2 years ago. While those things did help relieve some of my symptoms, they never fully allowed me to overcome anxiety or regain control of my life. It’s been a constant struggle for normalcy. 

I have been hesitant up until now, but I feel like it’s gotten to the point where I need medication to help control my anxiety. I recently had a virtual appointment with an general MD (Not a psychiatrist) that prescribed me to a low dose of an SSRI meant to treat depression and generalized anxiety. 

I tried to explain that despite sometimes feeling sad and dealing with the grief of losing a parent (coincidentally due to complications of the flu), I don’t really feel depressed, it’s the constant bouts of anxiety that has been causing complications in other areas of my life. He basically reassured me that being a healthy 28 year old that I’m least likely to die from COVID-19... I feel like he was totally missing the point, I am not anxious about dying from the virus, although the whole situation has been a trigger for another difficult time in my life. 

I know psych meds can really change the chemicals in your brain and I don’t want to mess with my serotonin levels if I don’t feel like that’s truly the issue. Obviously I’m not a doctor and I tend to trust advise of the experts, but I feel like I’m being misdiagnosed here. 

Has anyone else ever had experience with using SSRI’s to treat anxiety? I am open to trying anything that will help at this point, but I also want to be careful about what I am putting into my body especially when it comes to the balance of chemicals in my brain.",9.396966456003886,7.9689614077135005,9.836269648355213,62.57333495381627,60.267217630854,13.279468481607518,42.289580294927894,12.214722805548654,5.369702122832607,1553,76,259,43,17,526,186,363,0.14300000000000002,0.7140000000000001,0.14300000000000002,0.4641,2,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,1,1,4,8,23,0,1,24,0,28,14,3,6,5,50,49,17,3,4,8,2,6,5,0,1,11,0,0,0,16,14,0,2,9,1,0,3,8,12,0,0,13,6,33,11,51,32,8,42,0,9,0,0,13,17,0,5,27,185,49,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07209845769931486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504346877836745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528670635472461,0.4355466880633001,0.09188525575774248,0.0,0.05687123452897661,0.08333718938834601,0.06693167053098904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903447085819623,0.0,0.1815932352812672,0.0,0.0,0.08292632399644287,0.0835533195828929,0.08604151131333339,0.07006279145083115,0.0,0.17578820655011956,0.1824479528614828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385268295174053,0.14010721435375914,0.0,0.16882551469317794,0.0,0.0,0.08324968925810175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794484996436825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907098836125293,0.0,0.0735720493932056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07956111300863393,0.0,0.0,0.24675213462616355,0.2324225988973781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16355115328671793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0848924762432259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044699519265249545,0.06629877734599521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1723476790717495,0.19868055351293615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099291854803017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903447085819623,0.1638726559385085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06030877794838125,0.12546093682238246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08534726751141053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031275144667704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2306632350183725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08176401249144286,0.0,0.08650964944316088,0.0,0.0,0.10421040504618924,0.0,0.1606167501080744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09142380536689744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804422694035101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08502886924894296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690761518141311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301351600279294,0.0,0.054035275732423935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948540373772566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16566311999212124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024721608576981,0.0,0.0,0.09594683115159508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09080748138389916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571309751756779
mentalhealth,spirals108,2020/04/13,"Is it scary for healthy people to know you are mentally ill? I have the bad habit of oversharing, and sometimes I tell people I barely know things that occur to me because of bipolar disorder in a causal way. Is it inappropriate or should I avoid it?",6.0968750000000025,6.726873270833334,6.629166666666666,76.0325,66.29166666666666,9.733333333333334,32.66666666666667,9.725611199111238,3.0537416666666672,199,8,37,4,3,65,38,48,0.271,0.679,0.05,-0.9013,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,2,0,5,2,0,0,0,6,7,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,0,6,6,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,26,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731768539358689,0.1994424016025126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3749700647344781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3596128508997348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32971471745933817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4536428950506736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3235837242608797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28596473754760565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21736005078691026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25969571115627105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kailanlan,2020/04/13,"Doing things weird, any tips? I(20F) go to brush my teeth and pick up floss rather than tooth paste. 

Leave my keys in the door. 

Swallowed mouthwash 

Leaving things out of my fridge. 

Walk outside, forget something, walk back in to grab it. 

Misplace so many items that are right in-front of me. 

Forget what I was going to do so often 

Or just do the most random things, like putting on makeup rather than moisturizer. 

I’m on a few pills for blood pressure, sometimes I take a double dose or at wrong times for no other reason that being distracted. The moment I swallow it, I think oh shit, what have I done. 

Anyone else like this? Any tips?",2.1532084309133492,4.805293360655738,2.2200468384074945,94.66704918032788,82.60655737704917,4.141451990632318,18.550351288056206,5.288315135182226,-0.4517419203747073,498,12,98,2,14,149,90,122,0.162,0.795,0.043,-0.9045,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,1,2,5,0,8,8,4,2,0,15,13,5,0,2,5,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,1,0,11,2,2,0,2,0,0,5,1,5,0,0,2,2,9,2,16,10,4,17,0,0,0,0,0,8,1,5,6,64,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652027817913428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13634308859769495,0.19979256456036368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993697506680834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19954473297851988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289097247799186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22163713563425996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129371962330159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19052669093336655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19769149798031474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861421304182498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19602103051840386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200484470096762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1665222838393887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001567037579184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15011453144512354,0.19285228385000533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14660987652933405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3886324842921953,0.12494313616728105,0.0,0.0,0.11370152704692033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131933737015384,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OutsideOpportunity9,2020/04/13,"My older brother scares me I’m not even sure if this is the right subreddit for this but here goes.... 
My (F19) older brother (M22)  has had ongoing mental health problems from when he was probably 15/16. It started out as him skipping school, smoking weed, then eventually turned into him drinking all day and getting very drunk to the point he would just sleep. One incident occurred a few years back and he basically was very drunk, ended up getting into a physical altercation with my mom and threatened her with a knife. I was 16 at the time and I called the police. Also around this time his only friend I know of messaged me saying my brother had told him that my mom was dead and he had killed her, which clearly was not true. He ended up staying with a relative for an extended period of time. After that things kind of got better for a little bit - he got his GED and seemed normal. But, he can’t hold a job, he chain smokes cigarettes and weed. He seems like he’s gone back into that same place that led us to the altercation I mentioned before. He stays in his room asleep all day and stays up all night. We’ve never really been close as siblings, and we’ve had big disagreements in the past which led to screaming at each other. I just don’t get along with him, and I don’t like him as a person. Recently, he sexually harassed me (he didn’t physically touch me, but we don’t need to go into details on that) and again he went to stay with a relative for a while because I’m at my breaking point with him. I can’t live with him like this anymore, but I have nowhere else to go and I love my mom and wouldn’t want to leave her. He’s also very narcissistic and seemingly lacks the ability to recognize when he’s done something wrong. He isolated himself and rarely ever goes outside. He doesn’t have a job, or friends. I’m concerned for his mental health and ability to function as a person, but I’m also concerned for my own safety and the safety of my mother. I don’t know what to do, so any advice would be appreciated...thank you!",5.355985221674878,5.679487278325127,6.0312847290640414,80.74647389162563,67.8423645320197,9.057576354679801,29.786798029556646,8.954980946260402,2.2511161773399007,1609,55,321,26,25,526,204,406,0.122,0.772,0.105,-0.8126,2,0,4,0,0,0,48.0,2,1,0,1,15,16,2,1,20,0,28,8,2,2,8,70,52,36,2,9,11,7,1,3,2,3,2,2,1,2,15,34,3,1,5,3,0,6,12,6,0,1,17,3,41,10,49,31,9,59,0,0,0,1,53,23,0,5,28,205,56,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08438187577816658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207166254986222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058722112905407214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856376768509627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07687131509853358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279824471065574,0.0,0.05263919104913877,0.0,0.07347893131558922,0.0,0.0,0.07637105586448277,0.09427368473000808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881747340614282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113793975989742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08836776341858482,0.0,0.0845917854845657,0.0,0.0,0.07213575975722637,0.0,0.15296394032104405,0.0,0.0,0.05703447934845785,0.07811005076408689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343020884060713,0.0,0.13534558791729848,0.0,0.09815131511694364,0.0,0.13812667580820126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18357562503071934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17138146361044174,0.0,0.0955353551147982,0.08992200092938905,0.09491326523415727,0.0,0.0,0.09143397552713384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265612273850741,0.08654708258512246,0.0762501276561244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793577504394884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17404439441764386,0.0,0.0,0.3034021803631553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402868678962123,0.06659974966669341,0.0,0.0,0.08103521500113926,0.08460632571714644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05851414251394944,0.06567435428638811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08243246262381639,0.0,0.15079793656095966,0.09021914099317258,0.0,0.16326052393802573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931017309493856,0.0826269089095028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05531910620567557,0.0,0.08526188007522703,0.0,0.0,0.07374387468210226,0.0,0.06867033280788175,0.08645310966218138,0.08739252421604057,0.0,0.2358340166606813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641405595414946,0.0,0.0,0.06647775264437744,0.0,0.0,0.061120173316844564,0.3681576645021389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138544947015634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795010379292073,0.0,0.0,0.05736822836011483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15105710121893803,0.0,0.0,0.08251274394033299,0.0,0.0,0.09392584633435956,0.0,0.0,0.10387045543008393,0.0,0.0,0.21374757258206908,0.05093246629470999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004888526727479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226835314396977,0.09441202144731864,0.0,0.055607659651592915
mentalhealth,NDM2001-3,2020/04/13,"Online therapy/counseling? I (18M) am looking for affordable online counseling/therapy. I had a few questions:
1) what is the difference between therapy and counseling?
2) does anyone have experience with online counseling/therapy vs. in person?
3) does anyone know of any options below ~$20/month? I understand this might be unrealistic, I’ve been looking online and everything looks to be $35+/week, but that’s just not realistic for me due to my age. 

Any information/advice would be amazing, I appreciate it all. Thank you guys!",6.180543478260868,8.91656705434783,7.749347826086957,59.986413043478315,68.67391304347827,11.991304347826087,37.58695652173913,11.45678717892309,5.87421304347826,427,24,60,17,8,147,70,92,0.0,0.85,0.15,0.9355,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,10,0,0,0,1,14,16,3,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,7,2,9,9,2,4,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,3,2,39,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16078320543190686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22378098271924568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300955528994029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17190566749582406,0.0,0.0,0.2879740749400544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478748353666527,0.16094831102783622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16291704585363045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904249809667371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41450776930610495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17454727050571026,0.0,0.0,0.13133149875986388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436669627760391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843185839869484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1514831425059284,0.5644856288694289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17128834383513752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198129001031214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168820392807894,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bigc2093,2020/04/13,"Hypomanic episode and subsequent depression Hello, new to this... I’m seeking help coping with a hypomanic episode and the fallout from it:

I’ve been diagnosed with MDD (major depressive disorder) and have been on an antidepressant and mood stabilizer for over 5 years. My symptoms for the past three or so years have been manageable with very few depressive episodes. Before what I’m about to describe, I had no idea I had the potential to have a manic episode.

3 weeks ago I was admitted to the hospital with bacterial meningitis, which SUCKED, I was in the hospital for 5 days and on the fifth day, I was released and put on home antibiotics for a week. My bodily habits were thrown out of wack while I was in the hospital, I had lost 15 pounds during those 5 days. The last 3 days, I did not sleep. I was awake for roughly 72 straight hours. I’m not making this up. The day I was released, my dad picked me up, (I’m a 19yr M, home from college because of COVID) I was overly excited, strangely happy. It’s hard to explain. The doctors had told me I was lucky to be alive, if I was older, say 30, with a weaker immune system, I could’ve died. Likewise, without modern medicine, say if it was the 1980s, I’d also be dead. I almost wish they hadn’t told me that because I left with this newfound appreciation for life, which isn’t a bad thing! It’s a good thing! The problem though, is I wouldn’t shut up about it. I couldn’t shut up period, I was literally babbling nonstop, about anything to anyone who would listen.

My regret, and subsequent embarrassment stems from how I acted online though, post after post on my instagram and twitter accounts about anything and everything. That may not seem like a bad thing but I’m a pretty shy kid, people knew me and everything in high school but I was always pretty quiet and reserved. A couple of my friends reached out to me noticing my new erratic behavior online but I didn’t think much of it. 

The worst thing that happened was the delusion that I was somehow brilliant. I have some cool hobbies, I’m a mediocre amateur piano player and a decent writer. But during week after I was released from the hospital, I thought I was the second coming of Bach, and the papers I was writing for school (online classes) were going to be sent to the Washington Post. The worst part, was I was telling people that, online! 

I’m horribly embarrassed, and now, for that reason and my stupid brain chemistry, I’m depressed. It sounds stupid, but it’s true. 

Has anyone out there had a similar experience? How did you cope with it?",4.288010465724753,6.107675187755108,5.107551020408163,80.82202773417063,71.61224489795919,8.127681841967556,29.298796441653586,8.768130331264683,2.4142893772893776,2022,82,372,38,39,656,237,490,0.14,0.768,0.092,-0.9742,0,0,0,0,0,1,71.0,0,1,1,2,13,25,3,2,33,1,47,7,2,5,1,63,72,30,2,8,12,1,2,1,1,3,5,5,2,1,27,26,0,0,8,0,1,5,10,16,0,2,39,8,44,8,57,26,7,53,0,6,0,0,18,21,1,9,24,253,71,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07906159340147148,0.0,0.0893109465112514,0.0,0.0,0.07132524669838339,0.07421326223827861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472750635863886,0.0,0.14679161496827947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893992407368126,0.10873884710131558,0.0,0.07589415906900274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09956558704862367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682932627157077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0712109934079487,0.09868708828129327,0.0,0.2876010023227182,0.0,0.3072770199897072,0.09052601815725968,0.09256518533400628,0.0,0.10221951854048257,0.09128979028056844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1603165227321063,0.08724497815876181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890800745907724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05068875791295522,0.07480837808517894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887046216737402,0.09494446129860117,0.07989676153739349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978220706386024,0.09423417933036657,0.17892977433137236,0.0,0.08783422827897827,0.0,0.0,0.10068470446416147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270179064584306,0.0,0.0,0.09690524477122599,0.0,0.06299756638940067,0.04357375078432039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09736146991537074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059535047555594064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06556494535368611,0.0,0.0,0.17228060232256184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10154345728811084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09658412714103114,0.08514198993928816,0.1236662941459784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25625822588096075,0.18147668016547586,0.0,0.08534282760897173,0.0,0.0896606295994695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09170222075791007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14185500709199972,0.0,0.1805301741748847,0.0,0.08119526715059104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925445690294782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270260692928337,0.0,0.0,0.07795603046971428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23701561090863096,0.05714937944803272,0.17525753258098153,0.07080693304112579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17044982015134275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359112779545407,0.0,0.0,0.2146286225207435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10256414999410704,0.08597602054790336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335804892317487,0.0,0.0,0.11487092943491364
mentalhealth,Scollins9,2020/04/13,"What do mentally healthy people think about all day? So much of my thoughts are the same, negative thoughts that it’s even kinda trippy to think about how a mentally healthy person thinks all day",8.372499999999999,8.524800138888892,6.507777777777778,80.465,61.5,10.533333333333337,37.444444444444436,10.125756701596842,3.6348777777777777,159,7,29,3,2,46,29,36,0.092,0.773,0.135,0.1779,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,1,2,10,7,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,4,5,4,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34274660752160263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755115823020475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5355849199291106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19534148360772294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18422311831749547,0.2320244241382159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5108054849318254,0.0,0.4219184893803497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sam1234r,2020/04/13,Coronavirus thoughts Please post anything about your anxious thoughts during the difficult time.,15.141538461538467,19.46383853846153,7.633846153846152,63.48615384615386,48.23076923076921,11.353846153846154,59.153846153846146,11.20814326018867,8.249369230769231,83,6,8,2,1,20,12,13,0.268,0.595,0.13699999999999998,-0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4289368783785544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3124490603575991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4167809886056783,0.0,0.0,0.3636340395542511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6028562244589767,0.22139784211665986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,puddin123x,2020/04/13,"I don’t know what’s wrong with me I have noticed that I can never be happy for a long period of time. I could be feeling positive one day and then suddenly it’ll go completely downhill, usually at night but can be other times as Well. Nothing has to trigger this or if it does it could just be one thought or one word or one person or nothing at all and I’ll feel this huge wave of dread and doubt and sinking feeling coming over me and my thoughts will start racing. I’ll get these thoughts telling myself I’m stupid, an embarrassment, the most disgusting person ever and a waste of space and that no one likes me even though that’s not true but that’s all I can believe at that moment and I’ll think back to every embarrassing or miserable moment that has ever happened to me and tell myself that it’s all my fault. I can’t control these thoughts when it happens. Usually I would go out to distract myself and see friends but when I can’t do that, when I’m at home I will start thinking that I need to hurt myself because I “deserve” it or something and I get thoughts over and over saying “I hate myself”, “I want to die” or just “pain” over and over again. If I hurt myself it would feel like a bit of relief but I try my best not to give in now because I feel more stupid after doing that. I hate it because I can be feeling happy and then I can just feel it coming and then I’m spiralling, it feels like I’m trapped and no one can notice and I want to reach out but I can’t because I don’t know how to explain it and it always just sounds pathetic.",3.3882943143812696,4.2678422615384655,4.3713311036789335,88.89014715719067,72.53846153846153,7.006020066889633,26.74581939799331,7.079830092131019,1.1124394648829434,1225,41,265,11,23,398,142,325,0.258,0.634,0.109,-0.9966,0,1,1,0,0,5,14.0,0,0,0,2,16,26,5,6,5,0,28,1,0,3,7,81,67,41,1,9,20,0,8,3,1,5,1,2,1,2,28,23,0,1,18,0,0,4,10,16,1,6,5,11,36,10,29,50,7,44,0,3,1,0,8,14,0,11,29,193,64,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07085318825122712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06547654211834476,0.0,0.2076311907473863,0.0,0.0,0.0959370129409239,0.08936164803240107,0.0,0.09296380238044866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467016151387234,0.08928012952047612,0.0,0.0955050776927604,0.13597369982983554,0.0,0.0,0.05491592026607511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837421107998715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07451698687319827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05624201580967906,0.15404950690015873,0.07174413422097042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3444428056508872,0.12166504483665044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578813378179033,0.0,0.08897668898267744,0.081685445551005,0.09678755517029536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15059905830480733,0.1812915262558379,0.0,0.16813971134974404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08541428177449954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823137043756202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093594496256098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480272692585193,0.0,0.0,0.07535673711560315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631390424850479,0.06567438182068927,0.0,0.0,0.07990927409698619,0.0,0.16341105710260048,0.1938919669590808,0.0,0.0,0.34620671908860084,0.0,0.09060760744761363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487026800106626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771619531828403,0.0,0.0,0.06785502631033283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06555407988164802,0.0,0.0,0.12054188249793302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14885299838874674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10912377702711254,0.08366129296766701,0.3380054187718515,0.09930549580969708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057812539220193124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18756553849683508,0.0,0.1004495739172722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765617693848755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12097890948846375,0.09310021698317524,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CosmicxWanderer,2020/04/13,"Seeking advice from others on what it means to be a man. I don’t know if this the right sub to post but I’ve suffered from an addiction for 13 years. I’m working hard to recover by reading, writing, coloring, writing journal entries, and working out. I’m 25.

I feel like my father doesn’t respect me. I’m not what you’d call a masculine man. I was born 28 weeks premature and suffered from mine cerebral palsy - I’m able bodied but I do have some muscle mass on my left side that causes me to be a bit weaker and slower.

Since quarantine I’ve been making an effort to exercise, read books, meditate keep a day-to-day journal I’ve my derpiest thoughts. My dad just exploited me with one of my entries - I feel embarrassed, I’m ashamed, I don’t know what to do. I feel tripped off my masculinity due to these addictions. I seek help and advice on mental health what it means to be a man. My dad has this control over me physically and psychologically. I don’t know want to do.  I need help. This pandemic has everything shut down. I don’t know who to turn to. Please help‼️‼️",1.4520833333333307,3.8594722638888896,3.3801851851851867,86.85833333333332,83.30555555555556,6.7481481481481485,25.66666666666667,7.937092434478242,1.7256333333333336,843,36,171,17,24,283,122,216,0.11800000000000001,0.794,0.08800000000000001,-0.8201,1,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,0,4,1,6,0,2,8,0,17,5,1,3,0,31,37,8,0,3,5,3,4,1,0,0,4,0,0,3,13,7,0,2,10,4,0,1,6,4,0,1,3,5,24,2,25,30,2,18,0,2,1,0,13,12,0,2,5,98,37,5,0.1364003224382567,0.0,0.0,0.2973929698029449,0.0,0.26657763289731384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891382472879205,0.1515100089773318,0.0,0.0,0.13927997967975725,0.0,0.0,0.14012070434214047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15298455996933752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17593384771108506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12258781466394213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20690430418771635,0.0974444176039637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218789715096125,0.0,0.0,0.1449871643852349,0.0,0.0,0.2742787828048954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123887379936782,0.0,0.0,0.2998482001418517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148199349431123,0.0,0.0,0.06663830769691857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910482743933983,0.0,0.0,0.2971598765199914,0.0,0.0,0.1374594433195416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113911076575738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924283885522534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497265937891261,0.0,0.0,0.13063380436421515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728744686053108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164851300835713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11283175624296572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10828661995210984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.148364382474234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08045244418457875,0.0,0.1094121111193524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986021185101012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878373355900005
mentalhealth,selin32227,2020/04/13,"I'm ok right? So I have nightmares constantly, its really bad and usually they make me really angry or scared but in my opinion I just think it's cool most of the time. Some of the dreams i have don't seem like nightmares to me but when I tell them to people they freak out. I enjoy them though? The reason I've posted on here is because all of my dreams have some form of suffering in them-be it super obscure or blatantly obvious. It's ok though right? It's not really affecting my life at all it's just gotten me a little worried about my sanity. I'm ok right?",0.8707496740547569,3.113594771186442,3.1500000000000017,88.64565189048241,84.33898305084746,7.020599739243806,19.246414602346803,8.139509932561175,0.996559843546284,445,12,94,10,13,152,72,118,0.146,0.649,0.205,0.8767,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,4,1,8,11,0,1,4,4,5,1,0,3,4,23,11,9,0,0,7,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,16,7,12,10,6,14,0,1,0,0,5,9,0,8,5,62,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16192873311523492,0.11822178546845867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095762733748671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13698296381206718,0.09474749373570808,0.1943751495107128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12945400484914232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13445103094189678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18573739322678687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37272173313126494,0.199398845185875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4968616932662589,0.0,0.0,0.19416409674728,0.0,0.0,0.17655234922966606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16950889872091882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12426656814681505,0.381082915091336,0.0,0.11308583242424727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21359346612260272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19695175493003125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-what2do-,2020/04/13,"In between sadness and happiness I'm stuck in a weird in between right now. Between sadness and happiness. Leaning more towards sad. It's a constant thing. I can't shake off this feeling. It's been happening for a few months now. There are days when the feeling temporarily leaves, but it soon comes back. There is no day where I'm truly left without this feeling. My anxiety is one of the factors. What are ways to feel better ?",1.883980044345897,4.6817461341463416,2.8587361419068738,87.84424611973394,87.65853658536585,5.420842572062083,29.40576496674057,6.980632752743323,1.9259121951219509,341,18,62,5,11,108,59,82,0.154,0.647,0.19899999999999998,0.6149,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,8,8,0,1,5,0,6,0,0,0,0,9,15,4,0,0,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,4,0,0,2,3,5,0,1,2,4,2,3,12,13,2,20,0,3,0,0,0,8,0,0,9,47,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16667658251236084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675352446858797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19269597364111016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876831777681321,0.0,0.23544943425955825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810274287942113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4406639985715169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19266938407465173,0.4638717810701058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23070204724342944,0.2367258072363482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739086718731776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476402222788167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860671896058504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447489038194502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17294194301295485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21002725822756094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dirtynapkin0-0,2020/04/13,"Am i a bad person or stupid for not asking for help? Ok this title might sound a bit wierd but theres a lot of layer to it. Beacause of corona ive been staying home and i was forced to think a lot. I started to see pstcologues when i was under the age of 10. I am now 18 . Ive seen multiple psycologues but when i started colledge i stoped seeing my psycologist caus i could not brig my self to do the steps and asked for an apointment. I started to try to deal woth my toughts and problems on my own and realised that my psycologist never realy helped me,they helped from my day to day issues but nothing more,and i have a lot of things that i would need to dig in more. I broke down one day and i went with my mom to a spycoligical hospital to get a diagnostiwue or just something and in a litle interview, they adressed my issues and gave me a diagnostique of chronicle depression and a couole of other things and im pretty sure theres more  to it beacause mental healness run in my family. I started to think of the moment where i would talk about things and nothings realy came out of it. For exemple i had a moment in my life where life didt felt real and i fwlt like it was fake, like i was fake. Like i was faking every emotion and lile i was playing a video game. Now i know that  its a sign of trauma and i started to get angry that when i talked about it, they said yes i know what u are talking about then didt explain it. Then i tought to all those moment where i pulled out my best poker face and fake smile and said ""yes,im much better now"" while deciding if i felt like cutinf my self that night. I think that it never got deep beacause i refused to let them dig. Idl what it mean beacause ome side i feel like i need help but on the other idk if im able to take that help
Sorry for the meastakes, thank u for your time",2.2138005874673645,3.7727549451697118,3.6198490535248062,90.42771091710185,76.57180156657964,6.458518276762402,22.41261422976501,7.1686216300943375,0.5825979765013063,1436,40,317,16,32,472,187,383,0.146,0.737,0.11699999999999999,-0.8943,0,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,1,3,2,15,21,1,0,19,2,20,4,1,1,4,59,52,29,0,8,11,1,3,5,0,3,3,3,1,3,25,19,0,1,11,4,0,5,4,10,0,1,17,9,50,11,46,30,10,46,0,2,3,0,26,15,0,8,30,210,75,1,0.08638213091453283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16151126334912802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212547112961612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906527170408392,0.07639797502449439,0.0943069141829128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879814530397456,0.0,0.08873824350230783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896910255728912,0.0,0.0,0.16712798467345027,0.08905618394624333,0.07440080277971076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716827056189037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278067092625069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143338521344554,0.0,0.04367740088301232,0.06171141158530812,0.16588078441006807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09026219622374043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0690876812501881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28950060747419937,0.0,0.08664832047572261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27992257390735,0.1803210037851721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09494672012547888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833158142853803,0.12202850737608785,0.21100972917435096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22031699594790552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409546435535676,0.0,0.0,0.08705287066782688,0.0916377900453648,0.0,0.10116970770921464,0.0,0.0,0.06350080547755264,0.12810251105823925,0.13324644930147922,0.0,0.0,0.08106377817726007,0.0,0.16577196870289668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058534767494806975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07542554480045688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878816820767169,0.0,0.08265603312360488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0983217764359274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16433837561731746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376707488133827,0.0,0.18023080357317853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06650118462708855,0.0,0.0966977233495974,0.3057085843384707,0.0920718580466528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141413609641944,0.0,0.0649486120588935,0.2082920541964149,0.0,0.07952906034079871,0.0,0.0,0.17216534829239494,0.16605054459738114,0.0,0.0,0.05037011520295944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058647796618973874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007710078330857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272677475454034,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,brandenwirkkala,2020/04/13,I'm not sure what is wrong with me or how do I get help. 😥 I'm posting here because I don't know where else to turn. I'm located in Washington State. I'm letting you know this information because it pertains to why I do not get help. Everyday it is a fight for me just to wake up. I'm constantly tired no matter how much coffee I drink or caffeine I take. The caffeine in energy drinks will help for a little bit but it only gives me maybe an hour before I am exhausted and mentally tired again. I am regularly depressed along with being tired. I don't know if my exhaustion comes from my depression or vice versa. All I know is that I live everyday with this constant fight with my own body and in my own head. In the past I've had medication for my ADD that did help. However the problem said it caused a manipulation of my mind and made me with extreme highs and lows. back then however I had a job that had health insurance and I was able to afford medication and doctor visits. However it didn't matter because nobody could ever figure it out. Also mental health was not part of my health insurance. I have a job now that does not have any health insurance and I make too much money to get health insurance. But I also don't make enough money to be able to afford health insurance. I'm at a loss for what to do. I'm so tired of fighting with my head everyday. I have kids I love and I find it exhausting just to be able to play with them. The mother of my children is somebody I fight with because my temper is so easily sparked. I don't know what else to say other than I just don't know how to get help or where I can turn. I can't afford to get the help that I need I'm just hoping there is something out there that I can do to get help for this. If anyone has any ideas I'd very much appreciate it. 😥😥😥,2.3436652273304546,3.7988333910761187,4.2242231817796965,86.6674091948184,75.98162729658793,7.750774701549402,23.57641181949031,8.460557738077197,1.3457949538565743,1426,43,311,27,31,485,163,381,0.162,0.73,0.10800000000000001,-0.971,9,0,3,0,6,0,24.0,0,1,1,1,21,18,5,0,12,0,37,23,4,8,3,65,69,24,0,6,16,1,0,0,0,1,16,2,0,2,21,21,2,0,10,3,2,2,12,14,0,0,9,2,41,4,42,54,9,29,0,4,0,1,22,13,0,7,12,204,62,3,0.2120503677109116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305106829781884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613434770691204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049423515840032524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054351214560546826,0.0,0.17235191463495542,0.0,0.06014641489147365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716802699219526,0.07851338506444208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261137986706401,0.0,0.06088753852007087,0.0,0.15276741014816658,0.0,0.05643498797390072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12175911399264035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234751223185057,0.06185556858867665,0.0,0.0,0.13848575462571494,0.0,0.0,0.11809391500905812,0.0,0.0,0.07303490482722247,0.0,0.0,0.06393723256906034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460339815715185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215751301455623,0.06780601164905825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14508323586930733,0.4507992499089343,0.0,0.0,0.3316434138423244,0.07468095195321378,0.0,0.07020462047220563,0.06960896596715202,0.0,0.0,0.07979301809538372,0.0,0.0,0.1402848466963848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330746729954259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227862261212398,0.0,0.0,0.07084339202558619,0.06241478654385504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379457861940076,0.0668823950304865,0.09436351136341613,0.0,0.07101103195740391,0.0,0.0,0.1424122910924054,0.142464597249225,0.0,0.07137014087439521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15588141909554018,0.0524108869257293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053757953333225535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07654329469114485,0.06747535665976767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769521204381386,0.0,0.0,0.06763452129054831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723615291289232,0.05621032116075639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05441557763583299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06661832068483771,0.0,0.05314516217491098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32496093841927365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537666055156858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05832125369084746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378082484476102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07728126295582607,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,despondentpixel,2020/04/13,A vent post ig I’ve been really struggling with suicidal/intrusive thoughts lately and I have no clue how to deal with it. I don’t have anyone that cares about me and it’s pissing me off that I can’t handle everything even though I’m going through a lot less than anyone else. I can’t stop hurting myself and I feel like I’m being too dependent on people that don’t even want to talk to me. I just want to die and idk how to handle it. Any advice would be great,1.5303030303030312,3.3064666767676805,3.2414141414141433,91.41545454545457,79.20202020202021,6.420202020202023,20.090909090909093,7.3871296695380915,0.4451090909090909,367,9,81,5,9,122,64,99,0.18100000000000002,0.6970000000000001,0.122,-0.7178,0,0,0,0,0,2,5.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,1,1,2,0,10,1,1,3,0,17,18,7,1,3,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,2,0,0,1,5,3,0,0,2,1,10,3,12,13,2,6,0,1,0,0,2,2,1,2,3,54,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983333803765644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138021998776154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838333064300068,0.20795987821071465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20693460345057105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20924624243116335,0.0,0.0,0.2106438537952672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16954978716394328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681106809461063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18241032010844604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10262433902901844,0.14499701668267356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153487163921623,0.0,0.0,0.2237677464532107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21727640235799706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289514343461616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915761262081987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725521332078356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14070919152536926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19438272993432865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002348231775945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16968640058565504,0.0,0.21218130132761245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631342063611465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19941040433451784,0.16113018298821186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23942601697316154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441792996575315,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,balpon,2020/04/13,"Have a suicide thought, feeling lost and can't control my own mind I'm not know how to start, but these last weeks I often felt lost and not knowing what I'm gonna do. These past weeks have been really hard for me and I'm really struggling to cope with it.",1.4541818181818194,3.2114387818181878,2.6454545454545446,95.68818181818185,79.36363636363637,5.854545454545455,21.909090909090907,6.742157984588678,0.2883818181818185,203,6,47,2,5,65,41,55,0.23800000000000002,0.74,0.022000000000000002,-0.9058,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,3,2,3,0,1,1,0,5,0,0,2,0,16,17,5,1,0,3,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,3,3,0,4,11,1,5,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,26,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543556565699123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466795548813435,0.0,0.2177465922711133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20315241492970804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24926726538179236,0.1848578597582406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4951193854123002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2289854957259501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164893862436715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905651237102572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051769396790475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370821215147543,0.0,0.248063050793168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18003983095533255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36382219703793534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MessyConstellations,2020/04/13,"I think I have ADHD I’ve had this thought lingering for a while now, it started after talking to a family member and them commenting about some behaviors I had could be a sign of ADHD.

At first I thought it was kinda dumb, I’ve always had trouble concentrating but I don’t think it would be something extreme, but the more I thought about it, the more I started to get worried and the more it wouldn’t leave my mind, so I did a google search on the symptoms and I realized I relate to many of the signs, most of them from attention deficit than hyperactivity.

I don’t want to jump to conclusions and I don’t want to say anything about this to any relatives because I’m afraid that I may be overreacting.

Am I in the wrong for jumping to conclusions? What should I do? Do I have to get my parents involved? Do I need to get a profesional to diagnose me? Is there anything important I should know about ADHD?",4.24142796430089,5.431119917127074,5.421215469613261,80.99368465788358,70.82320441988949,8.884147896302592,31.602634934126648,9.265573868473778,2.7480213344666384,719,32,144,15,13,239,96,181,0.10400000000000001,0.865,0.031,-0.9171,1,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,3,7,4,1,1,11,0,24,2,0,0,0,31,39,8,0,8,2,1,0,0,0,5,2,1,0,0,9,4,0,0,10,0,0,2,4,4,0,1,8,1,23,0,26,22,5,11,0,0,0,0,7,3,1,4,6,109,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5397655218617261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124570376312267,0.0,0.0,0.1018076585950419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24639648176862206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09126157976778856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195309299019476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195208791245451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113288267802634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12734290532085946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2346512535954874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227647835718438,0.0,0.0,0.15852084511074707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517820318291948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116401388965886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100776798456083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16623478869395866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11905507912112227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525376064527172,0.0,0.0,0.21193044427180768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560559234320565,0.0,0.12033090183923728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19185572737650086,0.0,0.3565580879383988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17660519635211705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203736114904515,0.0,0.1063494011546094,0.1636839407032187,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mad_mal_fury_road,2020/04/13,"I feel numb, can’t find a medication regimen that gives me relief I’m 22 now, and I’ve had chronic GI issues since I was 15. I’ve been given the blanket diagnosis of IBS, and more recently, a brain-gut disorder. I’ve been in a bad flare up since August 2018. Every day is filled with pain, nausea, and anxiety. I flip flop between extreme anxiety, where I’m dry heaving over the toilet, to deep depression, where I don’t eat or leave my bed. Anxiety is the bigger issue for me, but lately the depression is worse. When I’m very sick, I have a passive view on dying. No suicidal ideations, just the idea of ‘things would be a lot easier if I didn’t wake up tomorrow’ because of the mental and physical pain. Only recently have I started to think about ways in which I could actually do this, but guilt largely holds me back because I don’t want to put my boyfriend and family through that. I don’t think I want to die either. On good days, I’m great. I’m getting things done, working on projects, saving up to move out of my parents house. But on bad days, which are far more frequent, I’m a mess.

I’ve been medicated since I was 15. I started out on Zoloft and was on that from ages 15-21. From there I was switched to cymbalta because my doctor had seen some of his GI patients get relief in their GI symptoms from taking it. I was on it for about 2 months, and felt bloody awful. Nausea simmering all day every day, super panicky, etc. After that, I was switched to lexapro. It worked really well at first, and I felt great, but then I seemed to plateau, and started having a ton of brain fog and just feeling lethargic. Next up, Prozac! Didn’t sleep for a week and spent many days in the bathroom thinking I had a stomach flu when I remembered I haven’t come into contact with anyone outside my family because of social distancing! Also worth mentioning that throughout this I tried mirtazapine a couple times to help with the sleep, but it made me feel like a zombie and on the verge of throwing up. Wellbutrin, too anxious like I wanted to rip my hair out and dry heaving. Basically I have extreme physical responses to all of the medications I’ve been on thus far. I feel awful, I’m losing weight, and I don’t want to live like this. I don’t know what to do. I’m speaking to my psychiatrist this week, but the idea of playing drug roulette scares me so much because my body feels so traumatized from all of this. 

TL;DR: underlying chronic health issues, have terrible side effects from medication, wondering if life is worth living anymore",5.3236596385542185,5.982706333333336,6.023150100401608,79.59809864457831,67.99598393574297,9.11656626506024,31.82756024096385,9.188382445141503,2.7008451807228906,2006,81,386,36,32,656,247,498,0.185,0.701,0.114,-0.9903,1,0,1,0,0,2,65.0,0,0,1,6,16,24,0,2,22,2,38,27,7,3,3,67,75,29,3,8,12,1,9,3,0,1,18,1,1,0,19,22,2,1,18,1,3,5,10,12,1,1,22,12,42,12,66,50,11,67,0,3,2,0,9,33,0,7,31,238,61,4,0.0,0.0,0.07014395110171423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057481951050056025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16496269257746826,0.08120329178146579,0.0712850760725719,0.05025976598034907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527084178718409,0.12003263670725517,0.21908515482425306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07984183829487143,0.0,0.1604824228705765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0619177609104759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738987282597575,0.07953321776574286,0.0,0.2781377002289917,0.0,0.12381928867731325,0.0,0.1491989919028015,0.0,0.08238004960503684,0.07357163836345275,0.0,0.07355760886203958,0.0,0.0,0.08335731402099138,0.0735505975767386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801645605239592,0.0,0.0,0.1211230331778553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355230515666442,0.0,0.18172198775263887,0.051350676338733636,0.13803104243177922,0.0,0.06569649321232161,0.06114060308615835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510806680383952,0.06895329520005772,0.0,0.0602890522820134,0.0,0.15849464197341254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640446866721405,0.0,0.0,0.048179264134070136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293920695560213,0.0,0.16228624565358746,0.0,0.22507033783324776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03950305275263336,0.0,0.08108312344196976,0.076109933626675,0.0,0.0,0.05077056435263981,0.10534997040711594,0.0,0.1269417002044479,0.0,0.0,0.08041469171489175,0.0,0.06110931760275608,0.0,0.06801405090883354,0.0,0.07287445610179062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.289643838621131,0.0724375552460294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057373472110563276,0.07639645445005784,0.052839648706123635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644458506804945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05466754252885349,0.15296955440624105,0.0,0.0798135962819427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225867641998249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04604780091128706,0.0,0.14194452326936835,0.0,0.08142537766814978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07196384495231342,0.0,0.0,0.0654363298816642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1783782120524801,0.0,0.1438626730417146,0.07327202287757473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15262988317779425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862442560560515,0.0,0.0,0.07471024581598015,0.054044382891416894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550699349111293,0.1381723015637611,0.0,0.0,0.04191347137403163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04880141200461194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05930805432114386,0.16958539128522804,0.05705454269374319,0.11531467976876465,0.0875297765097302,0.06462823639907428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07795017138994721,0.10465815650156024,0.0,0.07325127598528088,0.05106108195082538,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,BigFuzzyDice,2020/04/13,This quarantine has got me stuck in my head I’ve been in quarantine for a few weeks now and my city just recently went under lockdown. I’ve been trying to keep myself occupied with video games and my schoolwork but I can’t seem to stop the lonely feelings. Some days are better than others but there are days where I feel completely broken. Does anyone know of something I can try to help?,4.301096491228069,6.079060250000005,4.565789473684212,84.88885964912285,71.5,7.698245614035088,24.508771929824558,8.344100000000001,1.513261403508772,313,9,59,5,6,98,60,76,0.147,0.763,0.09,-0.5775,0,5,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,2,0,7,1,1,0,0,13,15,4,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,4,2,0,1,1,1,0,0,5,2,8,1,10,10,2,11,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,2,6,39,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177610104856322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22465171767839195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2663252622960751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32763162301950943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222863719072692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568707646753853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031554665983728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606881390130704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702579386879429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257762762124915,0.0,0.0,0.13959757282362306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2508048054930284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312416937285257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19554975572760197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21236422025152335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3449130227412769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037519670625935,0.0,0.0,0.23547035418030735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,harrassedbytherapist,2020/04/13,"I just called the suicide hotline and it went great Yeah I got that close despite everything I say here. I guess I just wanted to say ""Thank you, Tiffany in DC"" and also AMA. I know a lot of people have really dissatisfying experiences. I recorded mine and can make it available after I figure out how to mask my voice and bleep out when I shared my name.",3.1760476190476155,5.09854955714286,4.300000000000002,85.01333333333334,74.85714285714286,6.9523809523809526,24.523809523809533,7.793537801064563,1.2329523809523812,279,9,56,4,6,91,53,70,0.11199999999999999,0.736,0.153,0.2516,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,2,0,17,9,7,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,13,3,7,7,1,7,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,2,2,38,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20887727985537605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2667089570733497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234744923671704,0.2554985024574321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20890123480922088,0.2879680411180638,0.2877353717011105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14354575748078127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2220583644345437,0.0,0.0,0.17434946761641973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810794937747636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16732799116884142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4154249636253072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2857045707510684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24047295563801616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405938119611506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421300719732874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ilikelucy1,2020/04/13,"Whats happening to me? Ive had mild depression and anxiety for a couple years now an have been on medication, but recently things have changed. Im having a lot worse anxiety and constantly have a ringing noise in my ears. The ringing gets worse when im more anxious. I also seem like im getting angered really easily and i feel detached from things at times. I just feel really out of it and cant focus/remember things very well. Im currently on 300mg of wellbutrin for about 3 months. I told my psychiatrist about this and he put me on a low dose of seroquel 25 mg, which is an antipsychotic. He didnt give me a diagnosis and google hasnt done a very good job either. I havent used any recreational drugs in almost a month and i never had a withdrawal from anything, so that cant be whats causing it. Anyone know what this might be?",3.010428571428569,4.694015370588237,4.8327731092437,82.04176470588239,74.70588235294117,8.857142857142858,26.84873949579832,9.424239791934726,2.4008739495798324,663,25,135,17,14,226,107,170,0.183,0.758,0.059000000000000004,-0.9576,2,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,8,6,1,0,11,0,18,4,1,2,1,21,28,11,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,1,3,3,0,0,12,8,0,0,4,0,0,1,6,3,1,0,6,5,12,3,17,19,3,19,0,2,0,0,4,8,0,4,11,87,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408883629680985,0.0,0.0,0.09909946324743366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427043106129536,0.0,0.18959823030412584,0.1399952938699035,0.0,0.08664834336010878,0.0,0.10197630520715854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273008540091856,0.1310918336351886,0.0,0.0,0.13391442093675415,0.0,0.0,0.13711606942608626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673285112500393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268140594191903,0.0,0.0,0.14370884993159902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531621573429996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12948706454537842,0.11887617623690425,0.0,0.1039389340776068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10958280312602048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5354231547893744,0.0,0.12297232762751766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06810366128686246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06054147043702359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10535307976196773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248372246241475,0.0,0.131460444469875,0.0,0.0,0.19782488892373407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09557540311990068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457468679089445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15877374621677134,0.0,0.12235689472907645,0.0,0.14037817217801885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11281289256357985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469825297797422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225924729635917,0.0,0.0,0.11841168779303025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070278313791524,0.0,0.20449536740173915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141973125093277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25257187690131083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980096793686788
mentalhealth,andreixslm,2020/04/13,"This thing İ have since childhood It's like what I'm living isn't the reality. I don't even know how to describe it. Feel like my actions are automatic, my thought's, my gestures, plans etc, like a simulation. And it becomes so monotonous that I dont feel like I'm living until something that stimulates my emotions happens.

I also daydream a lot about heroic fantasies where I am the protagonist, don't know if its relevant, I just want to know what it is so I can speak to others who feel the same",4.458657142857142,5.5298933800000025,5.911428571428568,78.12500000000001,70.2,8.514285714285714,32.285714285714285,8.841846274778883,2.6847714285714286,398,18,77,7,7,135,64,100,0.0,0.818,0.182,0.9313,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,8,4,0,0,5,0,9,0,0,2,0,15,20,7,0,2,2,0,3,4,0,0,0,1,0,0,13,1,0,0,7,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,4,10,4,5,19,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,6,54,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16196773689532146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22368478311511325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373703477905476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2278254171025416,0.0,0.0,0.22588085842749145,0.13377292859332293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30722442675736794,0.2893831083564347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910166254534918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.333924994085302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.395794876527897,0.0,0.3576854912571509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17218862085451406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675396351364556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592188723611702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455572845779978,0.0,0.0,0.16079073304389482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11946081132952945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cookiebean989,2020/04/13,"It’s been 10 years since my suicide attempt and I’m so glad I didn’t succeed!! Somehow I missed my 10 year anniversary of the worst day of my life. I suppose that’s a good thing that I’m so involved with the good bits of life now that I almost forgot that this wasn’t always the case. 

Ten years ago I threw my legs out a 6th floor window at college, intending to hit the earth below me. I was in the thick of some really terrible times then. I was 19, heartbroken, homesick, lost, and very confused. I remember the sharp air that rushed in the room when I opened the window that very cold and snowy February night. It felt like little needles on my skin; a stark contrast to the hot, salty tears streaming down my face. I was in trouble for drinking on campus...again.  However, the drinking wasn’t just purely fun and games. I was using it to cope with a lot of uncertainty and hopelessness. My on again off again boyfriend told me he was dating someone else. He lived with my best guy friend at the time so a lot of “sides” were taken in the whole mess. And somewhere along the way my roommate moved out. I was alone. 

I spent the remainder of the week at the hospital under psychiatric care. The days I spent there blur together now. I was in such a haze of numbness. 
My entire life was uprooted. I got kicked out of college and I had to start over somewhere new. The next several years were spent kicking my ass into gear to show myself and the friends who abandoned me that they didn’t get the best of me. I pushed and pushed myself. I started looking forward and not backward. I learned to love myself again. Slowly. Very slowly. 

I graduated from a new (and better) college with honors two years later. I took a chance and bought a one way ticket to NYC and began living the life I used to only be able to dream about.

10 years later, I am living proof that things get better. Depression and anxiety are challenges I still deal with occasionally, but now I know how to handle it. 

Right now I’m sitting in the house I just bought all by myself. I’m reminiscing about the years I spent living and working in Manhattan, where I had an incredible job and amazing friends. Most days, my life felt like a happy movie. I recently decided to re-locate, slow things down and enjoy the present. Now I’m in the process of renovating my house from the inside out. I volunteer with an organization that raises funds for underprivileged women and children. I carve out time for my hobbies, friends, and loved ones. I’ve truly become a better person. I can now enjoy a glass or two of wine without overdoing it just to cope. I can take a deep breath, a small sip, and appreciate how far I’ve come.

I still have a long way to go. I’m still a work in progress. I haven’t found love yet but I look forward to the day I do. In the meantime, you can catch me cultivating my new herb garden and reading a good book or two. 

If you’re going through what I went through 10 years ago, my best advice is to hang on, know it does get better (and no this isn’t something that people just say. It’s true). You’re not alone. You’re loved. And you’re stronger than you think.
Take a deep breath, be thankful that you are able to do so, and repeat until you truly believe better days are around the corner.

TLDR - I’m 10 years post-suicide attempt and better than ever. I wanted to share my accomplishment with you all and hope this story might help someone.",3.127935109254828,5.036148438700148,3.9519016451892206,87.51925775480059,74.9527326440177,6.618743951510212,24.523226200784393,7.438213257848477,1.073481352824326,2691,87,541,33,58,860,317,677,0.059000000000000004,0.7440000000000001,0.19699999999999998,0.9988,2,2,4,0,0,3,85.0,0,5,1,19,34,48,0,1,49,0,33,19,6,5,6,88,85,40,1,3,12,0,6,2,4,1,6,1,5,4,26,43,3,2,9,10,7,14,10,12,0,6,35,10,72,36,81,46,12,116,0,6,2,5,28,47,1,13,57,342,98,13,0.1201246760538535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05869222158453531,0.10648327741353243,0.0,0.06014375554721454,0.12441293668500004,0.0,0.0,0.04997667673198434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0459475241927504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053468214799097434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06633413349249939,0.0,0.06766968714774403,0.1890951546224313,0.3187215424241336,0.06557251711623993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06123755656344373,0.0,0.0,0.051738385927333215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19367619597058366,0.06192163317734894,0.051731603732385965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05256095676031702,0.0,0.0,0.11767645059097505,0.0,0.0,0.050174376390616025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05432982337910169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11533852707647288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06585525351133507,0.1856160534741289,0.0,0.0941402779124601,0.0,0.06826962167565094,0.1511323184959792,0.04803733851913173,0.0,0.0,0.05947115763399029,0.0,0.06393747568430094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0402585191197006,0.0,0.0,0.059655453909926014,0.0,0.1386077479184129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05960260272093097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601738042751969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121190280138955,0.05868684898815305,0.06019824164533941,0.21214457948327886,0.05315327910227666,0.10087447371248667,0.0,0.06556513703020536,0.10212570388191933,0.21683442023816693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06371664907399571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383676001352752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17402574101557108,0.06387697788400529,0.056364435503908926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08139958934514263,0.04568011458208565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041639662634236234,0.052444116852736575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05752311706608008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06007859174859755,0.0,0.0384774717241122,0.0,0.0593043128271405,0.0,0.06803892053145648,0.051292908499955985,0.0,0.04776398192473971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785334590560907,0.0,0.0496841866829492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178124820112223,0.0462389221934704,0.0,0.0,0.08502486398923204,0.0,0.1438975822019659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313968985790456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09031880669210718,0.0,0.0,0.05529733122558661,0.0,0.0,0.1197082456311772,0.038485520996739984,0.0,0.0,0.10506849693608604,0.0,0.0,0.05739213789967815,0.06673146752793667,0.0,0.0,0.1760165305597582,0.0,0.0,0.10374915132283706,0.0,0.14867315732733907,0.035426323129800256,0.14302406476218166,0.048178384660820035,0.0,0.0,0.055678389089776376,0.0,0.06705745545731558,0.0,0.05789795052842665,0.0,0.08745219484519218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.348103588214126
mentalhealth,RLQuickChat,2020/04/13,"Online Psychiatric Help During Covid? Hi there. I’m looking for a source for help for my wife who suffers from depression, anxiety, PTSD, and also has some bipolar issues. 

I am looking for an online psychiatrist/psychologist who is working during this quarantine time while all the in person options are closed. I want to find someone who can either talk on the phone or via webcam or something 1-2 times per week who is a licensed professional. 

It would also be helpful if the resource was in network with UnitedHealthcare. I tried calling them today but they’re closed due to Easter so I’ll have to call tomorrow. Even if I can’t find anything in network I’d still like to find help during this time. 

I have googled a couple options such as betterhelp.com but I don’t know how reliable those options are and also I don’t know if they’re in network for me either. 

Please let me know if anyone has had success with this type of help, feel free to PM or reply here. Thanks in advance.",4.211968085106385,6.3577383351063865,4.935053191489363,80.60875000000001,72.56382978723406,7.253191489361702,28.77127659574468,8.07648339933343,2.114653191489362,789,32,139,12,16,254,120,188,0.03,0.797,0.17300000000000001,0.9811,0,1,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,3,10,6,0,0,7,0,18,1,0,1,1,32,27,18,0,6,11,1,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,9,6,0,0,7,0,1,1,3,2,0,0,2,3,11,5,21,22,4,18,0,2,2,0,17,8,0,11,10,92,20,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32581342607997266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10389166427647403,0.0,0.0,0.09495912049433487,0.0,0.11175724633867344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27734741065966595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15026740100764188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11697001093905772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969896724948942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06866788889633836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.372374269556484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4551414495268784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14174678899462975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22390723910441845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13887143229559287,0.0,0.06634823659860352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22808665191708435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11858106997199967,0.0,0.14907484618315575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875062803358958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150684770673658,0.10455054250317976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845531261277216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10915618715392654,0.0,0.12503245543706715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2375697320257329,0.0,0.1287287612375934,0.0,0.0,0.0922037552791534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010224128097428,0.0,0.10893584915625296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09886880987301397,0.0,0.0,0.0964731000823864,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mistress83,2020/04/13,"Don't really feel to blame, am I wrong? Possible TW. Eating Disorder, self harm, cheating. Never posted before. Sorry it's long.

I am dx with BPD, CPTSD, BiPolar II with rapid cycling, OCD, Anxiety Disorder, Paranoia, Eating Disorder, and OSDD. I am a slit personality. There are 3 me's in our system, Megg the host that fronts most of the time; Molly, depressed, self loathing, full of guilt and shame, self harming and suicidal; then there's Muse, vindictive, sadistic, narcissistic sociopath that loves to psychology play with people like a cat with a mouse. I have near amnesia when another fronts, tho I can recall foggy snippets of memory if presented with proof of something I said or did as an alter. Recently had a 2 month long dissociative psychosis episode and was absolutely horrid to my husband and tried to separate from him. And since then my alters are stronger and there's more communication between us. Muse, who doesn't see herself as married, recently divulged that over the 19 years we've been together she has cheated 7 times. My husband is understandably upset and feels betrayed. But so do I. And as I wasn't myself and have zero recollection of any of the events it's hard for me to accept blame even tho we share a body. I try to empathize and be understanding when my husband is mad or pulls away from my affection or doesn't trust me, but at the same time it's hard bc I don't feel as tho I'm to blame. Anyone else have something similar happen? And if so how did u handle the situation?",4.2177464788732415,6.521937563380287,5.293921126760561,77.34121971830986,73.01408450704227,8.487661971830986,29.31774647887324,9.174902378510234,2.82027228169014,1204,51,212,28,25,396,177,284,0.188,0.762,0.05,-0.9844,0,0,2,0,0,0,42.0,3,0,0,0,12,16,3,3,12,0,24,6,1,2,2,38,34,33,1,2,7,3,5,1,0,0,2,1,0,4,7,18,2,0,7,1,0,3,6,10,0,1,7,7,25,6,31,26,4,27,0,1,1,1,17,6,0,6,17,138,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808287703522959,0.1204008470910785,0.0878384927933145,0.0,0.0,0.0802861911905085,0.11764867733095025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787902055366083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09770503945996337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12754132394587786,0.144614251722328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889599453871643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3947877760986518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2349830813589941,0.09591902232877107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583882829467976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741723141878379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153668889436558,0.0,0.20571586363153016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609621467614972,0.0,0.0,0.20322766048417568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363131090335163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09164980101445347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855778183898835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796030965862247,0.10025811534253844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944451889363112,0.10996770756703976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355789418740122,0.0,0.22674568636284245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922198746747812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149824406533258,0.0,0.3593530694552305,0.0,0.0,0.09498192014838758,0.12906470516849267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17679112444986153,0.0,0.12853379483824534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12559659885570532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200860842299332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591316108001654,0.0,0.0,0.23906744043620495,0.138116692292823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12553979917571426,0.0,0.07394158411477066
mentalhealth,PBBSeddit,2020/04/13,"Down the Rabbit Hole (of my mind) Ever end up on that page of Wikipedia that's so far from where you started that you're not sure how you got there? Trite, I know, but everyday I waste a massive amount of time doing just that in my head, and the internet only makes it worse.

Let me give you a concrete example. The other day, while walking my dog, I saw a stagnant puddle on the roadside. My first thought was, ""how has that small puddle been around long enough to be visibly filled with algea?"".

My thoughts ran something like this. ""Has it been raining? Not really. Ok, is it usually in the shade so as not to evaporate? Possibly. That's the most likely solution, but I'm not satisfied with one solution that's only plausible. I might as well think of another. It looks fairly deep for its surface area, so maybe it will evaporate slowly because of that. Wait, brain fart, is evaporation really dependant on surface area??? Lol, ok let's take an extreme example to make sure. If we take the lake I live on and spread it out so that it's much larger but only one centimeter deep, will it evaporate fast in the sun? Seems like it. Hypothesis confirmed (theoretically). So it seems reasonable to assume that this puddle's relatively deep shape could be a large factor in the reason it's been around so long""

This has probably been shortened a fair bit. Now imagine doing this once every 1 to 5 minutes, for about 5 minutes every time, whenever something you are doing is boring (or very intellectually stimulating), and imagine that these kinds of thoughts often chain together or lead to internet rabbit holes that exacerbate the problem.

School: If I strain to the point of mental exhaustion I can focus for MAYBE 80 percent of the time. If I give a minimal effort it's more like 15 to 30. Instead I end up reading the news, watching videos or TV or anime, or simply daydreaming or philosophizing to avoid the decision of whether or not to try and focus. 

The topics which cause me to go off on these tangents usually include science, technology, politics, news, religion, philosophy as relates to whatever media I'm consuming, or just philosophy on its own.

For as long as I can remember it has been hard to even start on work I need to do because it's painful to try to focus and fail. Working at a McDonald's was easy when I had repetitious jobs with little thinking involved, and moderately tiresome when they required concentration which precluded my thoughts from wandering freely. 

The only time I can concentrate is before a deadline, when I have a new obsession (I spent upwards of 500 hours building a calculator from redstone in Minecraft for a school project without a problem), or when the thing I am focusing on is something that just popped into my head.

My question is this:


Am I just extremely undisciplined, or is this something else more health related, and if so, what is it?

Thanks for the help.",6.285517419088848,7.476956640074217,6.799816017316019,72.97845418470419,66.08719851576994,10.293156050298908,35.00932797361369,10.380263240014207,3.882641269841272,2315,108,400,58,36,756,276,539,0.08199999999999999,0.8320000000000001,0.086,0.7356,1,1,4,0,0,0,76.0,1,4,1,7,28,21,0,3,31,3,39,6,3,10,3,84,67,44,0,8,28,0,1,4,0,3,3,0,0,0,43,15,0,3,17,3,1,5,6,10,1,3,16,4,33,11,67,43,10,66,0,1,3,0,11,35,0,22,30,278,76,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588434491870649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582530881202613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09985683581081774,0.0,0.0696949690306382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894188500026278,0.0,0.0,0.09143286638912516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413881160229099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539433391304299,0.0,0.0,0.05282183292086573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684209671026451,0.0,0.14508671931674874,0.08462957333821837,0.0,0.05409736098088851,0.07408759860160956,0.13801668632742062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.069668197836664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15714113270089944,0.046548396560174864,0.0,0.06550676650025793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733706307481996,0.0,0.16811594920530445,0.08706099335022315,0.0,0.0,0.05489907419766985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08065974898236443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127789547900696,0.0,0.0,0.08529126591443993,0.04501274693748787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16750645482756032,0.0,0.1600582310267562,0.08209014655582605,0.07232345640345933,0.2174495642481826,0.06877942033246215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093442063664524,0.0,0.164568800386023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254079408691925,0.0868880704414295,0.08270051950608269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060209466604222085,0.06073138603103676,0.0,0.07910418529398179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722595994761641,0.11100165114945926,0.2491692247639367,0.08715250293117413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07742652863932188,0.09233537784071293,0.0,0.0,0.08830724860909342,0.15674370202287916,0.0,0.0,0.09175214291648626,0.0,0.0819269843555612,0.0,0.10494064964685114,0.16842359185909006,0.0,0.0,0.0927821943842422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16578410054948695,0.0,0.14912614353760165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522173269982409,0.0,0.0,0.1159453059590422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15438864661777452,0.0,0.12316446254001873,0.0,0.0,0.07540695376450256,0.0,0.0,0.05441392283902898,0.10496260264586313,0.0,0.2600931120914825,0.19103743622499253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121599247082208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18041317505358329,0.06758005405884662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736422693269888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895332345689003,0.0,0.11925536851666965,0.0,0.08346800864785645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marblestripes2834,2020/04/13,"Is it normal to be blown off about mental health when you’re above average attractive Please don’t take this as I’m trying to brag- I am writing this on my alt account bc it’s honestly embarrassing.
I’m seriously super depressed and anxious and deal with a lot of self hatred and general internal misery. I won’t go into detail as it would take up too much space.

My best friends all blow me off saying I have a “perfect” body, I’m so beautiful, I’m married (aka not single) I can’t be sad/unhappy. That’s only the VERY few times I’ve talked to them about my issues which I don’t anymore.

When I went to therapy once my therapist who was an older man told me “you won’t ever be happy until you choose to actively be happy and get over *traumatic event*” maybe not correlated at all but I feel like he thought I was an attention seeker from other remarks. I don’t typically try to talk to anytime about my mental health struggles/I don’t even like to celebrate my birthday- I truly feel I am not an attention seeker. 

Is this ever the case that pretty people are seen as attention seekers? I doubt the therapist thought that exactly but also he seemed to blow me off which has led to me never returning to therapy despite my issues seriously getting in the way of achieving what I need to achieve.",4.235985312117506,5.585272023255817,5.896487148102818,76.9732986536108,71.01550387596897,9.152509179926561,30.24561403508772,9.549672527348893,2.936252713178296,1034,43,191,24,19,354,153,258,0.065,0.768,0.168,0.9799,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,1,5,11,15,0,2,9,0,21,3,1,1,7,35,39,14,0,3,5,0,2,2,1,3,2,1,0,2,14,6,0,0,9,0,1,3,11,5,0,0,7,4,27,10,32,25,7,24,0,1,1,0,15,10,0,3,12,128,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09709108541062143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371581095274988,0.12040554092253587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741171705274626,0.0,0.0,0.13485851818909045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1251678017068625,0.10456977288386332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018979016838043,0.21964357884448832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12277652175386394,0.08673492829002201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09380063227789223,0.0,0.12686284295966213,0.0,0.06899978270943148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25848521324264445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2581051150007685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534398246728032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862903964291432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10321796435871324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12197210115184184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24470431969869594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924990804724055,0.09002356148545274,0.09363844488541324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11895547366575668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929709136654513,0.0,0.09233735014031888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417001891431496,0.0,0.0,0.133271106695812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12351704809723148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965496598121533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052659447772982,0.12665652447410816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18256957877805965,0.19516861814267225,0.0,0.0,0.2776845514602347,0.28193143525321185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927710677996411,0.07079482089061373,0.0,0.0,0.11601192293467505,0.0,0.16485808065118154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017550313519398,0.0,0.09636916243358387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254776735275117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08624578286372374,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WeLooseyGoosey,2020/04/13,"How to find a reason to keep going? I can't seem to find any reasons to keep putting up with the day to day struggles. Life has become so bleak. I find myself looking forward to dying because I'm exhausted and I have nothing else to look forward to. I got my degree, I got a decent job. I'm fairly independent, have a place of my own. I'm healthy and slightly active, run a few times a week. I don't want kids and I don't have any interest in starting a business or anything like that. I've experienced a loving and serious relationship. That took a lot out of me emotionally and mentally so I don't really care for seeking out another one. Been single since last August. 

I just find myself trying to find ways to pass time as quick as possible. I'm not suicidal but I wouldn't mind going to sleep and not waking up the next morning. All I do is work, play video games, and play guitar. Most days I just feel like this is it, this is my life. I don't really have anything I want to do and even if I did I don't really have the energy anyways.

I realize that I'm very fortunate that I can live a somewhat comfortable life but I feel like there's no reason for it. It just hardly feels like a life at all. But then again even successful and famous people commit suicide often so maybe it's just the human condition.

What keeps you going to push through the difficulties? Maybe adopting an animal would be something but the adoption process gives me anxiety and I'm not sure I'm qualified to take care of anything to be honest.",2.4705755894590844,4.466692653721684,4.33269879796579,83.65510922330103,77.15533980582524,7.521081830790568,25.275196486361537,8.418075326091056,1.8013041146555713,1206,44,238,24,28,409,163,309,0.099,0.742,0.159,0.9711,1,1,1,0,0,2,27.0,0,1,0,2,16,17,0,1,17,0,24,8,2,5,4,57,54,23,3,5,13,0,4,4,0,2,5,0,0,2,11,13,0,3,13,5,0,10,11,3,0,1,5,7,27,14,30,45,8,31,0,0,2,1,7,9,0,7,19,154,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11940246651152378,0.0920570466830092,0.06716026030549822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167347825468601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053516886020119184,0.09695881879961753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17901857876043986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698547719149845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111372071722633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333853647747775,0.09875362564750216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159709208927214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331700668679566,0.1881548041135339,0.0,0.0,0.4011992211414017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08421761033725259,0.1496818047299061,0.0,0.14042977139722596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864394362374287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711952132242423,0.23409936773779444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156179318007644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2480389424666363,0.1715619774427673,0.0,0.07752150649471486,0.0,0.1474455051003524,0.0,0.0,0.07463719729292957,0.07923526001801844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763967316050772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884731873044438,0.0,0.08864439255008327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933672605344691,0.0,0.0,0.08423831588989858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059489795209063674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06086357492989077,0.0,0.0917234362674286,0.0,0.0,0.0989717299051598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825470975053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687244565810502,0.2707928634660044,0.0,0.09425522030092512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992208807258425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262203936594949,0.0,0.0878549060284254,0.0,0.0,0.06758618892569458,0.0,0.0,0.06213927842990696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177874161650997,0.0,0.19205931259504525,0.0,0.08274245360124671,0.0,0.06600828526122154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238386402907784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975395912724989,0.05960466846707986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07243718511475174,0.10356340738113044,0.06968480956001917,0.07042104905033428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06391326054317578,0.0,0.0,0.06236456561875137,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RandyButternubs2,2020/04/14,"I just withdrew from my first semester in college. I've struggled with my mental health for more than a decade. I was told it would likely get better. It only got worse during that time. Medicine never seemed to do much for me, but I take it anyway. The worst bouts of my depression are cyclical. I'll feel fine for a good while, and then it'll hit me like a truck for weeks, possibly months. The semester was set to end early may. I had an A in the class. But then I was hit with my severe depressive episode. I could not get it together. 1 week... then 2 weeks of missing assignments. I talked with my instructor... they said that I could either do the work and show up or withdraw from the class. To be fair, I feel that he did his best to help me while maintaining the integrity of his class. But the fact still stood that I couldn't even shower or take a step outside or even do anything I enjoyed like play a video game or watch Youtube. So I withdrew... I'm simultaneously relieved not to have it hanging over my head anymore and extremely disappointed in myself. I don't know if I'm ever going to return to college. I'm still in debt for this class too. I'm living on SSI right now, which honestly has improved my life since I got it, and will allow me not to be completely devastated by the student loan. I'm grateful to have it. I don't know what kind of life awaits me. I'm 23, and time just seems to zoom by. I don't know if I can handle a job. I'm very socially anxious, very self concious and self hating, and when the depressive episode hits, I'm 100% useless for an extended period of time.  I'm good at art... drawing, writing... I'm even working on game design. I wrote a novella late last year and sold it on amazon but didn't make much, I didn't have much for marketing. I guess I'm just going to persue a commission based income with art and other creative things I could possibly come up with... Etsy maybe? I don't know... All I know is that I feel sad, and disappointed. Guilty as well. Always very guilty. But I did learn that the traditional route of college, and standard job just isn't going to work for me. I really don't want to have to be on SSI forever, but a good start may just be honing my craft and selling my services online.  If you've read this, thank you. I don't really know anyone I can talk to right now. I just needed to tell somebody.",1.9838128169663416,3.980393195020748,3.4474993084370698,89.42338819732599,78.66804979253112,6.608095896726602,22.951775011526045,7.635375032292933,0.9681591885661592,1848,59,392,28,45,607,228,482,0.135,0.7170000000000001,0.14800000000000002,0.5479,5,0,0,0,1,0,73.0,0,1,1,6,19,27,1,1,22,0,40,4,1,2,4,72,88,33,0,10,23,0,3,3,0,5,3,1,1,2,21,18,0,0,12,8,4,6,14,11,1,1,15,5,49,16,53,57,8,49,0,8,1,0,18,14,0,12,31,246,70,18,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07134882441571078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09687031590756927,0.08503852106425654,0.05995667541482805,0.0,0.07056292127708336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998675560449332,0.07583673310211153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07386391521945856,0.08990466684973833,0.0,0.0,0.2053873059299941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22156269801046746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594687139692392,0.0,0.0,0.16990632926335208,0.07756356129080677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13006960167322276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293681580883019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08959910366780723,0.0,0.14619691329172593,0.21576291104221948,0.13716028577810974,0.0,0.09446058527858192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08465794580664768,0.08800171672634363,0.09114562789475876,0.0,0.0,0.05747477022756418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17018240964923878,0.0,0.0,0.08929287028047148,0.28274764105075745,0.06989569167359026,0.09672696279030407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113205018539255,0.12567575390483982,0.0,0.07571665095635641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0572371504298879,0.0,0.08614493164999502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641335475831627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06844287030902009,0.0,0.18910292983130544,0.06358071622787934,0.066133790910299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06521486996995389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19333494062803508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577074695866152,0.0,0.10986414277711233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14645586548144088,0.0815655488651974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15612268439875074,0.17890677525125526,0.09687031590756927,0.0,0.0709312532101689,0.0,0.0,0.08740882109113418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060692551890459974,0.0,0.1369561963397844,0.0,0.0,0.0896419491623873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289429610270089,0.13784125313373433,0.07494713158237333,0.07894481654773139,0.0,0.0,0.0569668570565137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15000024470850398,0.0,0.0,0.08193545144680947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122521082056846,0.050576122182704235,0.0,0.2063445190382672,0.0,0.07709733853371115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18727569646857545,0.0,0.08738407138005083,0.06091259394348478,0.0,0.0,0.05521860599798409
mentalhealth,Wallyw1202,2020/04/14,"fat shaming so i'm 5""3 and 242 lbs,and i hate myself.Next fall i'm going to college and i don't want to be that fat,but i don't know what to do.
the thing is i'm not well with my mental health and i like to eat because it makes me feel good,it's the only thing that gives me real joy anymore.And if i'm happy i still want to eat to make the moment last longer.I've been fat shamed by whole life,i was like 7 kgs away from my ideal weight 3 1/2 years ago,and that was because i was crying a lot and i didn't want to eat anything.
The fact is that i don't want to give my parents or the other people who bullied me the satisfaction of me losing weight,like they won,but i don't want to be bullied anymore.My parents bully me about that 24/7,at school i'm bullied,once someone hacked into my facebook account and posted saying ""i'm fat and chubby"",so i didn't went to school for 2 days.
i hate people so much.Why it's so important to them that i'm a littme chubbier?why can't they shut up?The world is full of assh*les who don't think about what they are saying.After all is you're skinny or fat you will die anyway,being skinny doesn't stop that",1.3131111915972475,2.8764252749003987,2.869107207533504,94.81333846432452,79.11952191235059,5.0417240130387535,19.775624773632746,5.238671369647483,-0.3607864541832675,908,21,208,3,22,298,131,251,0.177,0.728,0.095,-0.9511,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,4,2,7,11,2,2,8,0,22,11,6,2,2,28,45,12,1,7,4,2,2,2,0,1,5,1,0,0,16,8,10,1,3,0,1,3,10,5,1,0,7,3,25,6,21,35,4,15,0,1,0,0,12,5,0,4,8,111,41,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10108582590665947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384171882225636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10714035584926254,0.0,0.0,0.13903028884780702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12526293408541184,0.07354363503337633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11835112103264135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500611725915114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057659909608010936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21878699532066329,0.06480915369103142,0.09564779000946896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12139319323980813,0.0,0.22517341976989144,0.0,0.12121468655175692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06267107462135528,0.09295436932328913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08054683386211209,0.11142423005610708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757685277326586,0.0,0.09694913017291107,0.0,0.0,0.1522395184217845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11492123048413833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382940902730407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127833069505994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214443689115032,0.0,0.08672933858164923,0.0,0.0,0.25324644551937364,0.0,0.0,0.15811608320468598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10921474129253636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1297976671500981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068581806892187,0.0,0.230820566249828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662213434945993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09106910991834022,0.09533900643892104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515205914191991,0.07306951419790055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363062463324357,0.0,0.0,0.27772968279602994,0.10253184864916466,0.1057122974236537,0.20579908311201467,0.12731686012587592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734352944016034
mentalhealth,richhyrich,2020/04/14,"I feel like I'm losing what makes me, me. I dont feel connected or related to my reality. It's like my consciousness is sat on a recliner watching my body and mind go through the motions of my daily life, like you would watch a character on a tv show.
Every day I come home, and it's like I drop every aspect of my personality. I binge watch movies and tv shows and listen to hundreds of different albums, but nothing sticks. Nothing stirs an emotional connection. I feel completely disconnected when I'm alone, even though I'm in contact with people whenever I am. 
Do I have a personality? I can't remember that last time I found something or heard or saw something that made me feel an emotion that I connected with. I feel like my perception is wrapped in a safety blanket and bubble wrap. I'm aware of everything that goes on, have perfect recall and clarity on my words and actions and know what feelings I'm experiencing, but it's like I'm watching it through a window or on a TV. It doesnt seem real. Nothing positive gets through and all I feel is disgust, pity and loss and what I feel like I'm losing. I know I should change, and that I have friends and family who love me and want to see me grow and succeed, but I cant find the motivation to actually take care of myself. 
I dont know if I want to exist. I'm not suicidal (anymore) but I wake up every day and look at myself and feel like I'm losing grip of what makes me unique with every passing day and I always ask myself if it's worth it.
Can anyone explain to me what this is and how to cope with it, because all i want to do is force my friends away and isolate and completely lose myself because I don't see any value in what little emotion or connection I have left to the world",5.767556179775284,5.379219407303374,6.930651685393263,77.07698876404493,67.00561797752809,10.153707865168537,33.530337078651684,9.766711354998122,3.0462161797752816,1383,56,279,27,20,470,161,356,0.10800000000000001,0.716,0.177,0.9798,1,1,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,0,8,4,21,1,0,12,0,21,4,2,5,3,73,65,35,1,7,12,0,10,8,2,2,1,2,2,2,21,26,0,0,20,5,1,6,7,7,0,0,5,21,45,14,33,58,2,27,0,6,8,1,12,14,0,8,14,171,66,2,0.0,0.0,0.07715815729151865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188974796050046,0.0,0.0,0.06579022359784921,0.0,0.0,0.05376839037678755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841339168604315,0.055285607212564335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391713540668912,0.0,0.07428621371081973,0.0,0.0,0.09639723209577407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08782580708444201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08061425453518616,0.0,0.0836425872911319,0.06810937023694963,0.16580085749056842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15297536056851335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260836935812403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1853322806416688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26681978940990675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05222312343366528,0.0,0.2664700205442061,0.0,0.0710604786723333,0.0,0.07453749585792993,0.0,0.3598086547651744,0.22594242267445044,0.0,0.0,0.0722659655916306,0.0,0.0,0.08669307638919012,0.1221742066494585,0.0,0.04130933559694296,0.0,0.04493569769623328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07931082333894407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035975490016366,0.0644503006375991,0.0,0.0,0.0859067170613459,0.0,0.055847484046338776,0.3090258232166769,0.07924608111266439,0.0,0.0,0.06639651348218363,0.35382377721433866,0.0,0.0,0.07136121248959136,0.0748152728158606,0.10555590665224396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07983530730307105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.227601260800458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054815223707985763,0.13807681501659844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899957552375854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956769613006405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12601260333877554,0.0719797866286115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217395484836266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08648665640513557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059448675621540464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768309806062478,0.0,0.046104705624888345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13990760524904602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056167052621884976,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,15-Pasta-Plates,2020/04/14,"Help figuring out what’s wrong with me I suffer from extreme anxiety disorder and depression, I had PANDAS when I was a kid and I am 20 and go through the residual effects of the disorder. When I’m alone I dance around and I scream and act out a lot and make funny faces and my movements and speech are sporadic. I have done this since I was a kid. I am a pretty normal person when I’m around people I’m comfortable with, I’m deemed the funny one and someone you can talk to and have intelligent conversations with if you want to just relax from acting like idiots with your friends. I hate mirrors and I think the reflection is a lie sometimes and I get scared when I wake up half awake (I have closet door mirrors.) I lucid dream almost 90% of the time and I can feel all of the pain in the lucid dreams I don’t know if that’s normal but the pain is brief and I wake up just fine, I can remember my dreams a lot too. I don’t want to work outside of my home and it’s hard for me to find a job to work from home at, I can’t find any and it’s frustrating when someone tells me that they work from home and I just don’t want to leave my house. If anyone could assist me with my question I’ll be happy.",1.021328125,2.945827414062503,2.7848500000000023,93.33515000000004,81.5,5.971,20.005625,7.087006719466742,0.27724518750000016,942,25,214,12,25,312,129,256,0.13,0.727,0.14300000000000002,0.3071,1,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,1,4,11,16,3,1,15,0,21,5,3,2,1,54,35,26,0,9,7,0,2,1,1,0,2,2,5,3,6,26,0,0,10,5,0,6,4,10,0,2,4,4,35,6,29,29,3,20,0,2,0,0,13,8,0,7,7,141,41,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1201836307334365,0.1243054936041898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816183523890345,0.0,0.0918156877709793,0.0,0.0,0.08392142929881803,0.0,0.0,0.21368815847710732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0958269514568844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337385658168273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2751087822917954,0.0,0.0,0.12282308823163544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060686191627658814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21939392286282325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272787767393448,0.0,0.06270598554431968,0.0,0.0682106639926798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776451848999948,0.10751518442588484,0.11849582660213158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08044750368072373,0.0,0.36117235510570334,0.0,0.0,0.13848804619078445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11910225976062848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659603677813339,0.0,0.0,0.1270848419048762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05863616699296554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20407501613532544,0.0,0.0,0.08011490696963662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351900694665784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.081329292614843,0.0,0.2554214766935907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08320740519719162,0.10479765216893573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210444054016276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.134450916757019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359603241642417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12016189507523703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928255878379776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20338669971796355,0.0,0.11870377494519678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646828229957437,0.10490358847822034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690456975911822,0.0,0.0,0.06998517314941541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21237437362551773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26213001324432306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312240526607274,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,account14407,2020/04/14,"I think i traumatized myself more than i thought as a kid When i was a kid i used to go to a site called bestgore alot, beheading videos, shootings, that kind of stuff, dont know if the site is still up, i stopped going to the site at around 17 years old, because i had actually met someone i cared about, and for the past couple of years i actually cant get this one specific video out of my head where a guy walks up to this couple anf shoots the wife in the head, he had no motivation, he just did it, in an instant the love of that mans life was taken from him, and its been constantly serving as a reminder that one day the same thing could happen to me, that one day my wife could just be murdered right in front of my eyes with no actual reason behind it, it terrifies me every single day, i know she will die eventually and so will i, but for a man to have that kind of thing taken from him so early, even for the same to happen to a woman, its really fucking hard not to think about when i lie awake at night in fear that the next day may be the last day i see my wife, i hate it, and i wish for these reminders to stop so i can just live in the moment and enjoy my life as it is now, i dont want to be afraid anymore",21.812290076335877,4.909739312977102,19.03302290076336,51.93525954198474,58.54198473282442,22.63938931297709,60.7969465648855,11.602472056035307,6.992043358778626,948,22,224,11,5,315,141,262,0.114,0.833,0.053,-0.9159,0,0,0,2,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,1,15,10,3,2,20,0,21,7,3,3,0,32,42,15,2,5,6,3,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,6,19,8,0,2,7,2,0,4,6,5,0,3,10,3,28,5,42,24,5,41,0,0,2,2,17,16,1,3,21,159,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.3126506121564408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591230520309912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09507051668681467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510146319993215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10905000799319443,0.0,0.1088849920462074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540784970070468,0.0,0.1705348176979925,0.2363340799472332,0.0,0.34437087697887714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083672794510988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503267445680534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053733130064255,0.0,0.08997970096853174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12017447638323048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09873059396584176,0.05579617034037069,0.0,0.12138853393749473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1057442015872559,0.1888775769552488,0.0,0.09566767019654096,0.10543831291898872,0.21920570968713055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22242187684473028,0.11738387921005075,0.08705247617513615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086544907593494,0.0,0.0,0.09430226378215832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09638698638521036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357808213052828,0.1002202154355024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11206377054099367,0.0,0.21710190941145494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194825993763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841584540195643,0.10980342185273928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0912026580985202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510207897708487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09048736610964014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08528691635661402,0.17857141406059632,0.0,0.0,0.12225514223510307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14190019006731766,0.1368603152309879,0.0,0.08478359056689208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09223690616136992,0.0,0.0,0.06299067318628743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280939911478787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754542713481752
mentalhealth,underwaterwoe,2020/04/14,"Why do I feel so incredibly lonely even tho im surrounded with ppl i like and ppl who like me? It almost feels like my sense of belonging is deteriorating
.",-0.0066666666666677105,1.9920296774193569,3.5540322580645167,78.78438172043013,107.06451612903228,7.227956989247312,18.06989247311828,7.793537801064563,1.5220924731182794,124,4,25,4,6,45,26,31,0.08900000000000001,0.6940000000000001,0.217,0.5313,0,2,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,4,3,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,4,3,2,4,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,14,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3757730132529096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24785854652693035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37948983487356797,0.2680889077517407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4053498651549422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5500055795140171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33861768340536713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Aldirick1022,2020/04/14,"I'm going to say it and think a lot will agree The Covid-19 virus has had me on edge. My step daughter and her boyfriend have had the virus. I work as a security guard and feel that I am not protected at my job even though I am listed as an essential worker. My wife has type 2 diabetes which puts her at a greater risk of infection.

I drove Uber to make ends meet but with everything closed that is not practical. I have had to not pay some utilities to get by and have been shorted hours at work because some sites have closed down, hotels and libraries. I know that the stimulus money will help, but for how long?

I know things are not going to get back to normal, at least not the previous definition of normal, for a while. I just wonder if that normal is going to be something I can handle.",4.241164772727274,5.133238468750001,4.9064772727272725,85.79261363636367,70.5625,8.568181818181818,26.42045454545455,8.841846274778883,1.72975,625,19,132,11,11,201,99,160,0.021,0.9109999999999999,0.067,0.7132,2,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,5,2,0,1,9,0,19,2,0,2,0,31,32,13,0,4,9,2,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,7,8,0,3,5,1,2,6,5,1,0,0,5,2,15,1,21,24,5,21,0,0,0,0,7,10,0,5,5,95,22,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14328807031088048,0.0,0.11359439463361595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16504666822597233,0.0,0.0,0.12307934498430215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16747518329444952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422180707285978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947155065692942,0.0,0.3177130670414693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12490335886959247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835126315099704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849190044740413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20482105997619285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490976916134134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584241512193503,0.0,0.0,0.12438696688148765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5477366289524899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18732854381527436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14818930019875162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14345775301128738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237995691401664,0.11940257479532446,0.18308335842450701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20208358110185004,0.2713232656224887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,c0mpl3xy,2020/04/14,"CPTSD and relationships Hello everyone, I'm 20. I'm diagnosed with PTSD (I believe CPTSD) and generalized anxiety disorder. I grew up in a very neglected state, and was homeless for 6 years until last September. Life has finally taken an upswing, and I'm housed, in school, have a relationship etc (I never went to school as a child). My girlfriend has had her own battles with depression, and seeing her improve from medication and other things gave me the courage to start taking meds and go to therapy. I was raised by my mentally ill and narcissistic mother, and I have some concerns I'd like to ask for input on. Sometimes I feel like certain requests and preferences aren't respected by my girlfriend, and I understand why, but I need help with bringing up my issues and triggers with her in a way she won't feel I'm being demanding or controlling. I am also worried that I have modeled some things from my mother and have some unhealthy expectations in my relationship. I've been taking Wellbutrin for the past 2 months, and it helps somewhat, but I think I'm going to speak to my provider and switch to a different antidepressant. You're welcome to ask me whatever you want, thank you for any input.",7.539313186813189,7.891433178571432,7.829107142857143,69.6216620879121,63.19642857142857,11.356593406593408,37.76648351648352,11.051253699011982,4.4349578296703305,968,46,164,25,13,317,134,224,0.102,0.7879999999999999,0.11,0.3872,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,2,0,1,1,10,1,0,8,0,14,4,0,2,2,40,38,21,0,4,3,2,2,2,2,1,4,1,0,1,5,19,0,2,5,0,0,5,3,3,0,0,7,4,26,7,29,29,6,22,0,2,1,0,23,7,0,5,10,108,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258537687758627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08723472001533279,0.0,0.09813376013202492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398487500314574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14452750095757388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438767977505541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11048727610703164,0.13020138197573436,0.0,0.13402517578413875,0.14701986069623366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14306597990063205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12257692646255235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972432744542625,0.09164317475133454,0.0,0.1405243426357823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14580882856098426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17196660442420886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14801776293326213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338908707215085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10456522673686357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09060787574638572,0.12534214329694965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249003247899852,0.12922848738791434,0.12927595130746108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239177953637124,0.0,0.0,0.0951179085473221,0.09893735473422106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12245766443633628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499523196663658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4131737639845737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25965218226054304,0.10222245908450092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268720853705757,0.0,0.09079716213843167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929010162582912,0.0,0.0,0.1181028822286152,0.14669922704106142,0.0,0.17044690972996207,0.08219656994371814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13354388326281316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105844338844949,0.07566279919230011,0.10182260097120133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891673763644847,0.11575264263804158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13027444904182192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0826080394659632
mentalhealth,-Spaceholder-,2020/04/14,"Looking for some advice, I don’t know where else to turn. I’ve gone through some crappy things in life like a mentally and emotionally abusive mom, my dad who I was the closest to got an alcoholic druggy girlfriend who made me the bad guy in his eyes so she gets all the attention, my oldest sister is 14 years older than me and resented me my whole life, and my other 2 sisters who lived in the house picked up on my moms abusive behavior and took every chance they got to belittle me and put me down giving me the lowest self esteem and confidence possible. Mental disorders such as schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, borderline personality, depression, and anxiety all run in my family and I’ve been recently diagnosed with depression and anxiety. Because of all of this I feel like a sociopath who can’t make genuine human connections with people because my brain tells me they hate me or I don’t know the right thing to say or do. Everything around other people feels like they don’t really like me or want to be around me. My (ex?) best friend is closer to other people now and never texts or calls me back, plus she and my other friends are all closer to my husband so I always feel like an annoying 3rd wheel with the group and they only put up with me for my husband. It feels like the coworkers who I socialize with really only do it because they feel sorry for me, and my family talks to me because they’re family and they have to even though they put me through hell as a kid and still try to make me feel small. I always feel like an outsider no matter what situation I’m in. I can’t even feel comfortable with my in laws who are normal, kind, accepting people who actually do care about me because I feel like there’s a barrier up and I’m not part of “their” family. My husband is the only person in my life who I am certain actually loves me. But he doesn’t understand because he’s never gone through anything like this and doesn’t know depression and anxiety, which I am thankful for, but it also means I feel like I don’t have anyone to talk to. I tried therapy but I haven’t found the right therapist yet and now everything is shut down due to COVID. So long post, and if you’re still with me, thank you. But I’m wondering if anyone out there has felt anything like this and knows advice on how to make it stop because I feel like I’m not living MY life, I’m just an unwanted guest in someone else’s.",7.4296250000000015,6.2637353791666674,7.894166666666668,74.08750000000003,63.95833333333334,11.666666666666664,34.166666666666664,10.864195022040775,3.545916666666667,1922,68,372,44,24,638,214,480,0.091,0.792,0.11699999999999999,0.8793,1,0,2,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,8,1,22,31,4,0,18,0,26,10,2,6,7,89,70,40,0,5,13,9,12,12,4,0,7,1,0,6,23,32,1,2,22,0,0,7,14,8,0,0,10,15,63,23,54,59,9,49,1,3,2,1,50,26,1,9,27,248,86,0,0.0,0.13604414776802612,0.112048764529041,0.0,0.0,0.1122017840123338,0.0,0.06135438218666256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04591116907955435,0.09554029711176984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13175666330719146,0.0,0.0,0.08028553560449793,0.0,0.09448792631266524,0.10221506234472004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04414514323376005,0.04793538300511586,0.2449784247593933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06024879482586401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408912289956448,0.05862255594148099,0.0,0.05853384749696545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834278048836527,0.05827046548176827,0.0,0.0,0.13159485080474612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591823909110277,0.06457910350364915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07583820902411591,0.0,0.048370836010893946,0.0,0.10319374025476416,0.0,0.21648610114973826,0.0,0.31931330193405383,0.3281126740717717,0.055123098742717265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06294766777496831,0.08871044483777699,0.0,0.02999462519345173,0.05507339846146694,0.0,0.0,0.09183286874373738,0.0,0.0,0.056845437126634764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0566809990316969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06624402763481163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05978421807522071,0.12620527319995606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16220298174838446,0.3365745396968347,0.0,0.10138907526394454,0.05080650025140943,0.04821037441709529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05181523234505762,0.05432321857589124,0.11496589613111592,0.0,0.0,0.06253688263349386,0.0,0.0,0.1157125945051503,0.0,0.0,0.13447700546292815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855705871036512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0562501164891661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13098985380751832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06216999445265936,0.0,0.15920489315620134,0.10025729667351342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647217309498569,0.05498340480661846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17314027707725432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07355729354206382,0.0,0.05668595871129844,0.0,0.0,0.09805653433287104,0.0,0.0456551467878049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598916891861563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06453182563799373,0.0,0.058522791409844274,0.04864374408932366,0.0,0.0,0.06426637264047437,0.0,0.0,0.09169622482749452,0.04799776223294718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228879653240507,0.050179321647506665,0.1057117799791472,0.06565392867405502,0.06665803424696101,0.07628199193572968,0.0,0.05640554069736796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06378519592763594,0.077955943976698,0.062446155802987575,0.0,0.05976637207596856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03386220992193905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409679111227315,0.0,0.0,0.06225925587229383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0369704901681848
mentalhealth,sfdudeck,2020/04/14,"Dissociation Hello everyone! I was wondering if anyone had tips for dissociating. I’ve been dissociating more than usual as of late, and I haven’t been able to ground myself. If anyone has advice about grounding or how to avoid dissociating quite as often, I'd appreciate it!",5.001428571428568,8.059404653061229,7.497306122448977,58.76555102040818,73.89795918367345,9.634285714285717,26.126530612244892,9.888512548439397,3.3764171428571434,224,8,34,7,5,80,39,49,0.046,0.885,0.069,0.2695,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,1,0,8,7,7,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,3,0,8,3,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,5,2,25,4,0,0.3224728294690223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151167167968529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4509610004629728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30813660782716124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3637633975688425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34298954810547977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35515826304193976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34970802778921584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Elysia591,2020/04/14,Whale Sounds inside my head When I was very little I used to hear whale sounds inside my head as I lay in bed waiting to fall asleep. I never had any control over it and it just started by itself. At that point of my life I didn't know what whale sounds sounded like and only figured it out much later in my life. What was this most likely related to?,3.6776712328767154,4.403339506849316,4.3286575342465765,90.03243835616442,71.73972602739727,6.387945205479452,22.819178082191787,5.6839178017228535,0.25433917808219153,276,6,59,1,5,88,51,73,0.0,0.9640000000000001,0.036000000000000004,0.3612,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,4,5,3,2,1,11,9,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,2,5,1,0,8,3,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,5,9,2,11,5,2,12,0,0,0,0,1,7,0,1,6,39,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700314982737359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804340689584852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.513213446758249,0.0,0.28180616547383924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13741198924341005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532124105138549,0.2443076841179261,0.2505994657732093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18380354766752569,0.0,0.19284141288861711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19016190502992736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363626760063457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697514836623926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21594884821639732,0.0,0.20630399816078326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,diamondsinthesky72,2020/04/14,"dealing with repercussions and consequent thoughts of being the therapist friend  I (16f) am the therapist friend in my group and to everyone around me pretty much, and I'm aware of that fact. I have been for a while, and don't get me wrong; I don't necessarily want to change that. I enjoy being someone people can talk to and be around easily. I'm a naturally social, extroverted person; I've had a few minor issues with mental health in the past, but nothing serious or threatening, and I'm in a good place mentally at the moment. I've even had three instances of official mental health training from police and mental health services as a mentor and student counsellor in my school.

I'm still currently in school, and I've moved friendship groups quite drastically this school year - I know, petty friendship issues, but it is relevant. I never used to be the therapist group, I was more the joker, but how I moved into the new group was by being the outsider people could trust with their secrets and talk to, because I posed no threat to telling anyone. That sounds horrid, but I created that willingly, I'm happily integrated now, but I carry a lot of past and ongoing secrets on my shoulders, and being in this day and age it's a lot more instances of anxiety, depression and (not sure if i should add some trigger warning here) self harm. There's around 5 or 6 people that have talked to me about this things, each individually. Most of their parents are aware but other friends and even best friends aren't. I'm really close with a lot of these people, but oddly (I guess) my best friend I recently made in this new group is the one that struggles the least, and not included in those 6 - she's the cool and chill friend that we all know.

I know this is long, and if you're still reading I appreciate it a lot as I really would love some advice.

Anyway, specifically for this question I'm going to talk about my friend May (16f). May has a bad home life to put it briefly. May has struggled with depression for a while and at least one instance of (tw) self harm, if not more. May's parents are always arguing and talk about divorcing a lot. May has a younger brother (he's 11 i think) and they aren't close so he isn't a help. May's relationship with her father is awful - they hardly talk and when they do they just argue, to a worrying point. May's relationship with her mother isn't much better - her mum knows about the mental health things and attempts to help but is always arguing with May and her dad. May has even told me before she really wants to live with her grandparents or aunt who live about half an hour and 40 mins away from her home respectively. I only became close with May recently through a mutual friend (about December) but she's really opened up. The mutual friend is my chill best friend and they're also best friends, possibly closer.

Now, a few nights ago May let me know she was crying and upset. She's really struggled with the quarantine due to the home life, but the way she was talking I knew something was wrong. She told me she was just missing people but I suspect there was more to it. She started using language like ""I can't live"", ""I won't make it through this"", ""I can't go on"" etc so my mind went in to 'you need to stay safe and tell me if you harm yourself' mode. Long story short, me and the mutual bestie (16f) talked her down of whatever was happening; we didn't know whether she posed a threat to herself or not, we just tried to do as much as we could. She went to sleep seemingly better, and me and the mutual best friend talked after about our concerns. She woke up fine and has been on edge since but nothing as bad.

This is just one example of a few I've had like this: staying up and feeling like I'm tugging with someone's life. The thing is, I'm starting to really feel these repercussions. My mind is almost constantly on edge of what I can do to help May and others and how they are, and how every word I say to them could make a massive difference or be the last. And even my friends that don't have issues AS serious as these, not to invalidate them, I find my thoughts orientating around others and their often-fragile-seeming life status, and I'm worried it could take some sort of toll on me. 

I don't want to be selfish, and I don't want to distance myself or push away these friends that I feel often need me because I'm scared of what could happen or what they could do to themselves, however I'm struggling with the repercussions and thoughts following these incidents to the point that I feel I'm juggling a bunch of other peoples' lives all except my own. Am I being selfish? Do I need to change my attitude or my ways? Any guidance or help would be so appreciated.",5.873354371921183,6.1549223114224185,6.2077709359605935,80.0714655172414,66.72629310344827,9.602709359605912,30.256773399014783,9.470358648722666,2.512499322660099,3747,127,737,69,56,1206,347,928,0.134,0.706,0.161,0.9856,5,1,1,0,0,0,107.0,5,2,11,9,37,58,5,6,44,2,88,11,2,9,5,185,146,84,0,20,36,8,5,3,14,17,8,2,3,3,43,69,0,1,21,1,0,9,20,25,0,5,24,8,96,33,106,88,32,80,0,3,0,1,101,36,0,40,34,515,139,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03929096511226124,0.035642122797041355,0.0,0.040262681103702236,0.0,0.0,0.03215446453809689,0.06691284837718761,0.0,0.0,0.02734293908741964,0.0,0.030759145271948875,0.0,0.0,0.0281144921733934,0.0,0.0,0.1431752082691494,0.0,0.0,0.0755538115348484,0.0,0.06714429642544191,0.049021062875791485,0.0,0.03421419706758959,0.0,0.2109800050325929,0.07112172996595939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08506983948706559,0.0,0.0,0.04345075500963574,0.0,0.1926177449010157,0.0,0.04416679429134305,0.02593094775939012,0.04145286484617428,0.06926248768835362,0.0,0.0,0.0420089869836494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04484274579224213,0.10622848651373897,0.0,0.033877123200572755,0.038420636109104164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08132184943961131,0.028724729609530056,0.0,0.0,0.0367495452517501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4349063282241193,0.0,0.02100711289762942,0.0,0.04570246705727099,0.03372471111757052,0.0,0.0,0.044293839962515,0.0,0.0711119160817882,0.0,0.03601862880932917,0.0,0.0,0.1709576472915962,0.0,0.0,0.10780277368953722,0.0,0.12099623940757134,0.0,0.039596954923557616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259006708059468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13258417492910224,0.03277503068532519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04111558506499965,0.11360089775898667,0.058931052715926635,0.0,0.14201822739368092,0.07116594255345468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17091777070110473,0.0362894494820078,0.038045949173436636,0.05367854060135062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026019262426042,0.0,0.08119759320731675,0.0,0.0,0.08546985760144357,0.08867290929532012,0.08944156108055548,0.031011024778812263,0.07766661560118156,0.0,0.037732650241678836,0.0,0.07716166030731073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173830378457922,0.030580130380372845,0.0,0.0,0.08929284425543893,0.0,0.07676650899737845,0.16725172307458058,0.03510822916519422,0.0420089869836494,0.0,0.07601944719885242,0.04532867806231046,0.0,0.04090617100525642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04042032335494082,0.04504236019874387,0.04276634545278825,0.040219057801177314,0.0,0.15455032625840726,0.0,0.07940144787130576,0.08633706899549792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031975156106922864,0.04025539944754553,0.12207846489708013,0.0,0.07320802826789681,0.08389179516322072,0.0,0.0,0.03326061942942702,0.0,0.040237214761964235,0.04098717281186134,0.0681365156095302,0.030954218969467408,0.0,0.0,0.056919109116767674,0.08571313340908178,0.06422060401868668,0.0,0.0,0.16813726649762706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03789573088164278,0.0,0.03023154505754552,0.2908602857836763,0.07028743771105785,0.0,0.0,0.14005437726879774,0.08013757829851655,0.025763776220877218,0.0,0.09576240347895844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684127221820831,0.0,0.02729871277933634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06945391016049708,0.0,0.0,0.09486329796829043,0.06383075856926787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454676562489268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166671078147787,0.0,0.05712547047802664,0.08792265890406957,0.0,0.02589274764511173
mentalhealth,hellosunshine0529,2020/04/14,"Should I share my abuse story with the abuser’s name? I’m so lost. Trigger warning: Sexual abuse

I am a survivor of childhood sexual abuse/incest and naturally- my first sexual relationship was an abusive one. I was 14- too young, but very much blinded by the whole “first love/boyfriend” thing. Over a decade later, I decided to go to therapy to finally sort through my past. It wasn’t until then that I realized that I was also repeatedly abused by my first “love”. Up until recently, I didn’t (for whatever illogical reason) understand that your significant other could rape you, and that it was still considered rape if I ended up not fighting back and accepting it. I definitely had the “fawn” response. 
Anyways- ‘D’ is what I will call him, just because I am not sure if I am okay with releasing the name just yet- because he is well known and he is local and he does have a lot of friends, along with a family at this point. 

But- I now know that he abused me. He raped me. It’s hard to say even now. I’m going to put another trigger warning here just because I personally think it is important for me and for whoever chooses to read this- to know the full details. 

Throughout the year or so that I was with him- (as a fourteen year old freshman in high school)- he repeatedly manipulated and abused me. I thought it was okay and normal and somewhat my fault. All of these things I am about to describe happened many, many times. Almost ever single time I was with him.

He would take me outside, under a bridge in his neighborhood. (Sketchy AF) He would beg me to suck his dick, or to have sex with him, whatever. Doesn’t matter. But I would always initially say no, that I was scared of being caught, that I didn’t want to, etc. I would cry every time- begging him to not try to convince me to do this. But- I was blinded by first love, and blinded by being abused as a child- so I “fawned” and eventually accepted- crying the entire fucking time, every time. He would convince me to do these things by telling me that he would leave me and hate me if I did not do this, that I didn’t love him if I didn’t agree to do these things, that his other “girlfriends” did these things and that I was being prude. I didn’t want to lose him. I always did it. 

He would take me to a field by his house, where the owners would put up signs that said “will shoot if trespassing”. We had  climb under an electric fence, walk through tall ass grass, and cows and bulls were definitely in the distance. Along with houses and possibly people. He would constantly drag me there, as I cried because I was scared of getting shot or in trouble or hurt. He would lay down in the grass on these people’s property and tell me to have sex with him. Often trying to get me to take off my clothes as well. I again, would say no and please don’t and cry the whole time once I finally submitted. He would do similar things in different locations. Any time and any location he could, no matter where we were. I used to catch the bus at his house in  morning for school. While we were waiting for it, he would get me to suck his dick behind his parent’s truck, in front of there house, while the bus full of kids could pull up at any moment. Again, I cried, begged, and eventually submitted. 

The scariest and most visceral memory I have of him, though- was when he almost suffocated me. He convinced me to have sex with him in his room while his parents were home. I was scared as usual, didn’t want to do it as usual, but did it as usual anyways. But this time, he put his hands over my face, covering my nose and mouth. I couldn’t breathe. At all. This was the only time in my life (and still is) that I experienced the feeling of true physical helplessness of what felt like someone was trying to kill me. I was kicking and trying to scream stop, crying my ass of, thinking he was literally going to kill me as I slowly started to lose my vision from not being able to breathe. He was hysterically laughing the entire time and clearly saw that I hated the shit out of this and that I was fighting back. HE was on top of me, and was much stronger. I felt so helpless- similarly to how I felt as a toddler whenever my grandfather would hold me down and rape me. I hated myself for being in this situation again and I hated myself because I legit thought that was how I was going to die. He stopped as soon as I thought I was going to finally pass out. He was laughing his ass off- I was crying harder than I think I ever have. I didn’t understand how someone who “loved” me clearly saw I was in pain and yet continued to harm me. I didn’t understand why I let it happened, why I stayed. Why I still loved him. After he let up, he was laughing and told me that I was overreacting and that he was just kidding and that it was fine. I started
 To doubt my own feelings and experience. 

There was another situation where we were having sex and he ended up making me bleed. I freaked out and cried and he told me to “settle down” and that it was “ok” and that it was “nothing”. 

The feeling of constantly being so afraid that I was going to be caught was something that was very familiar for me from my childhood experience with rape. I didn’t realize it at the time, but it really fucked with me. I can’t even begin to tell you. There are so many more stories about this person and I- but at this point- I think you get it. 

He has a family now, and I am hopeful that he grew up and never did this again to anyone else. He was only 16 at the time- and I know a lot of the times, kids don’t understand what abuse is- especially if they were abused themselves. I think it is important for me to share this now, because it’s important for my journey, and it’s important  for the public to understand the grey areas of rape. Any unwanted sexual act- even if it eventually was accepted- even if it is your partner- even if a decade has gone by since you admitted it- IT WAS STILL RAPE. IT WAS STILL ABUSE. IT WAS AND STILL IS WRONG. My intentions of sharing this is not to get revenge on him or to inflict pain. It is to inform, and it is to heal.",3.597245718837115,5.023189482304532,4.665490508429581,84.88266427718044,72.6954732510288,7.9583167396787475,26.64476304261251,8.525976844751913,1.760448825169255,4771,165,978,83,93,1561,407,1215,0.212,0.6759999999999999,0.11199999999999999,-0.9995,3,0,1,1,15,2,150.0,4,6,1,9,58,67,20,5,38,3,132,39,12,10,9,195,205,98,3,34,32,2,8,1,3,17,8,5,2,7,83,67,0,6,33,1,0,21,25,39,2,5,80,21,155,28,155,95,16,151,0,6,6,24,105,54,10,24,76,723,238,3,0.03387009281893322,0.4414357366305904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783201086678105,0.0,0.0,0.0270859009903734,0.056365261003834474,0.0,0.0,0.0921312982873878,0.07103149101689414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023682756417881642,0.03470391267538719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05208802140340023,0.0,0.12388136526951575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03458515167152857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732030755327031,0.0,0.08112753924414601,0.0,0.2976376523565177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03515180894802688,0.035387038114003636,0.0,0.0,0.029639946472376177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028294116434834544,0.0,0.0599976981228251,0.0,0.03777410664780556,0.11185438435226104,0.06127487610826789,0.057074028010152315,0.0,0.0,0.06626289987635116,0.06385941829724683,0.0,0.05137720983502032,0.0,0.0975618019380422,0.11130909337825098,0.0,0.11523953459695865,0.0,0.0,0.026167949693509874,0.0626247100713984,0.08847862780682206,0.0,0.11549492571357035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0599024224441667,0.0,0.030340950401540823,0.13375881804688694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035785612660338015,0.03397446469595775,0.03364064449470737,0.0,0.15632615850935622,0.03625863488058978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494447886481374,0.0,0.055842351701505887,0.0,0.0,0.035863537839918205,0.0,0.06926892935271185,0.02392344821565765,0.016547216506859384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07578394046034509,0.036973207335078466,0.05759028341735176,0.18341448687479786,0.0,0.022608549962218942,0.10301687399136167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049796830729487984,0.0,0.026122703606951115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03318549966093158,0.03249926754122125,0.0,0.0355409648505988,0.036070543451915967,0.022951251459001003,0.051519463667269165,0.0720803335568921,0.0,0.07521745964035881,0.0,0.032332836076558534,0.04696251543649108,0.059148117238221214,0.0,0.03717919091720605,0.06403637099076705,0.038183440578386296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10214639479631063,0.0,0.0,0.033879258547070475,0.0,0.021698048753102158,0.034824096473856474,0.03344263054025301,0.036363804159145585,0.0,0.0,0.03221821444401767,0.08080457176679574,0.10172961479165264,0.0685566843414314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03476716355232263,0.02801769078370325,0.07614280685948084,0.0,0.0,0.057396039465753085,0.02607485219503381,0.0,0.0,0.047946852051303904,0.036101012385735466,0.16229219926189542,0.056633828397981215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0319221616457608,0.0,0.07639828384433316,0.0,0.08881186202555698,0.0,0.03873340294630879,0.0,0.13501070800480422,0.10851293931982853,0.03327719422674776,0.08066721111645596,0.2567490054842864,0.0,0.0,0.06472865031886196,0.0,0.09198227893108724,0.0,0.0,0.1762998055874398,0.0,0.029252885423929623,0.11190936632815293,0.05589274747738837,0.05993237486535709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060906562157690226,0.0,0.0916874718394612,0.07562949812318429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3368447902138616,0.03703162948125635,0.0,0.04362245860155939
mentalhealth,molotsy2,2020/04/14,"Intense fidgeting when upset or having a breakdown? Hi all,

Often times when I get extremely upset I will fidget. I will shake my hands, move my body in weird ways and blink intensely.  Does this happen to anyone else? Does anyone know why this happens? It’s really uncomfortable and at times it feels like I can’t even control it. 

Thank you all!",2.48696153846154,5.3435180615384645,3.554134615384616,84.05274038461542,83.76923076923076,6.3269230769230775,20.43269230769231,7.645422480735847,1.1534999999999995,274,8,48,5,8,88,50,65,0.18,0.7290000000000001,0.092,-0.7206,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,1,4,6,0,3,1,0,4,2,2,1,2,9,10,5,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,4,0,0,0,2,7,2,3,8,2,9,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,5,29,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3159234114341228,0.2314717571102076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509353698458285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533775649260945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3953911799391574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18871903316241515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14921159541103246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11422701475739107,0.16139033411660889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802878618738732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3995433917785036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.124154370242726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036834134389256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2401068532707702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14472389663156246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079878144196783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263460177405278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17931704827941944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203848870588826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,burntout_baloo,2020/04/14,"the great escape; dreaming about escapeism in the midst of a pandemic first time posting:

i'm an MSW grad student on full scholarship that got withdrawn out of her program recently, right before the pandemic. i've got an A average but the Faculty of Graduate Studies culled me along with 1000s of other students, because i had two Fs on my transcripts....not because i was a shitty student, but because i didn't submit final assignments. why?

since last summer where i was completing a 1000 hours of my placement straight, my dad got sick. he's recovered and he moved back to Canada permanently. and my home is seemingly whole again. but i burnt out. i lost my dog last october who had been with my family for 14 years. after getting into tech last year, i want to continue to have a career in it. i was told school would only slow me down.

**it's been hard waking up everyday, trying to get through the door, finish my classes, advocate for myself.**

>there's a lot going on right now in the world. as an MSW student we are made painfully aware of it, aware of people's pain and their struggles against the system, of how challenging life is for people from so many difficult walks of life. i've lived with this for a long time. having my worldview shaken, and transformed, and going through the process of breaking rose-coloured glasses time and time again. 

before this pandemic, things were hard. and now, i'm safe at home with a family that is working still. my dad and brother work for grocery stores. my mum's a professor whose whole teaching load got moved online for 5 colleges and universities. my sister's a really successful photojournalist out of province. and then there's me. ~~i made my money as a tour-guide, working non-stop through my summers and school year. i used to be a really proactive person, with an infectious drive and passion for life. but that's gone.~~

i am in so much **pain**. but i'm still attached to responsibility. i still have to function in my home. my family is mad understanding. but i can't share everything with them. i have final papers i am so late on. but my profs are mad supportive. but i feel like i can't write. like there's something stuck in my chest. and i have a great therapist, but i don't feel like i have all the space in the world to be open with her with everything going on.

>before the pandemic, i planned to return to the middle east, visit my best friend, and go back to india for the first time in 7 years. i needed a break. i needed to not be a student, a worker, a family member. 

i just wanted some *time and space to escape*. and i dream of it today. i just wish i had the money and the ability to fly somewhere, surrounded by nature in a small town. where all i needed to focus on is whatever my spirit needs to **heal**. i feel a deep sense of **loss**, and that the pandemic has just frozen my state in time. i am working hard to overcome this, to learn how to give myself to the world again, to return to the leadership and excellence i used to exude before this time.

    does anyone out there relate? how have any of you dealt?",2.333664476227288,4.9108622144053635,3.5079128978224468,86.27140935446467,80.95979899497488,6.5549181806468235,23.92498389382812,7.7755630220614735,1.4466140909676586,2430,88,460,43,65,785,279,597,0.079,0.802,0.12,0.9795,0,0,1,0,0,0,106.0,1,1,2,14,25,23,2,1,41,0,35,11,2,7,2,75,70,37,0,8,13,5,6,3,1,1,8,0,4,1,16,35,0,1,6,2,4,10,5,9,0,3,20,6,62,14,88,46,9,101,1,2,0,1,22,42,0,3,47,308,78,28,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04621074610946535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047514704094812725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10450417511359143,0.0,0.12427156513753808,0.0,0.23129387356270506,0.0,0.0713130612299143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07124800720774398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05946661195897289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12214454311661553,0.0,0.2562422473567762,0.0,0.10307807416728264,0.0970920633517237,0.0,0.14887959102981665,0.0,0.11560251454227047,0.0,0.0,0.05250074630317389,0.0,0.07100585328457741,0.06518723981074649,0.15447828011520895,0.0,0.21739465529788413,0.14983806364964847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18261910752872826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044888620636949,0.0,0.06692056127654357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16617364543956506,0.07665456737173626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399281183793367,0.0995960202490506,0.0,0.0600042320617355,0.06013675582687405,0.0,0.0,0.07417933009841562,0.05777168052207313,0.0,0.12859858935619775,0.0,0.06889423677581064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444477448823221,0.04995368012113218,0.20154679336718576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05168173898510904,0.2169221136834296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422087467944082,0.05933442118708316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06508071945565784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706557190784024,0.0,0.0670959353815962,0.0,0.0,0.11606392554546745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13754524653832356,0.0,0.06186236228384905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05621188106307005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0523139648317098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16280338506127107,0.05681221287347042,0.0,0.07103980765217173,0.0,0.0,0.07711288639611122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07889931228431148,0.045145320975924656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3169941047003156,0.0,0.06441202242454372,0.06493253175620918,0.0,0.04613600174172703,0.0,0.06638074701780917,0.07074204494317475,0.0,0.11738010308529814,0.0,0.0,0.08016153207787656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061317511874928274,0.1517354298104007,0.07814323207414063,0.0,0.0,0.19788398295465756,0.0,0.0,0.048272254204347984,0.0,0.0,0.1750394401537075
mentalhealth,Thebeastking47,2020/04/14,"Thinking about finally seeking help but want to consider the others involved in the horrible event that happened to me ,HOW SHOULD I PROCEED? ​

This is my first ever post so I don't know all the formalities

I'll begin with where it all started,I don't remember exactly how old cause young self forced my mind to put it into the deepest part of my mind and tried to forget it ,but I think it was the summer and I was going into 1st grade or 2nd grade when it happened. I was over at a older cousin's house with my intermediate family for a relatively large family for what I assume was a holiday. Somehow me,sister(2 years older than me),and my 1 year old female cousin ended up in a back room where we were playing house.I don't remember what role my sister played but I was the husband and my cousin was the wife.It started as a completely harmless game house and completely traditional game of house with nothing out of the ordinary.At some point after a while of playing my cousin who was in the bed watching tv under the covers and told me to get in the bed under the covers as well.My young mind knew something was off or slightly unusual but still did as she said.Once in the bed she she told me to kiss her on the lips,I do believe I was pretty reluctant but I did kiss her.This continued about 12 times or so,she would give me an instruction then tell me to kiss her(all of this happening without either of us leaving the bed).I felt completely powerless without her ever restraining or laying a hand on me.After a while of this happening she told me to pull down her pant and after to kiss her again.I knew 100% this really shouldn't be a thing that was happening so I tried to be as slow as possible following the instruction.My really only vivid memory is while I was in the process the smell of butt cheeks(as somewhat funny as this sounds),this has caused me to have a flashback to the terrible event any time I smell that smell.Although I tried to be as slow as possible I did eventually did get her pant down but as I was going in to kiss we heard footsteps coming toward the room I quickly rushed to get out of the bed and got in natural position for kids playing house.Then my cousin(Around 25F)whose room it was came in and us to clean up the mess we had made in her room(She was kind of suspicious but we had take positions that were not out of the ordinary).As we were cleaning the younger of the cousins came over to me and told me kiss her.I told her no then the older cousin told her to go clean elsewhere.That basically sums it up but I do completely believe she would have gone farther if my cousin hadn't come in.

So here is the main point of my post,I have never told my parent only a few of my close friends.Also I have ever talked to my sister or that cousin about those events even though I have seen her many a times.Over the years with as I have noticed the mental effects of suppressing that memory.From what I can tell I have issues of generalized anxiety,social anxiety,and mental instability.Growing up it was rough and I had force myself to do a lot things that others can do naturally,at times this included emotions.And with age I have realized while my parents would get upset with me and it lies within my mental state,along with other matters.But due to my age in order for my to get the necessary assistance I would have to tell my parents.This is not so much the issue,the problem is I have no intention of exposing that cousin cause I feel as though she doesn't deserve harm terrible treatment.As well I feel as though I should maybe talk to my sister about the event prior to telling parents.I know she has dealt with suicidal thoughts and feel as though there may be a connection.

I need advice on the matter and the actions I should especially with the whole COVID-19 on going.",6.497357182303487,6.381476522427441,6.712060501932871,78.33766122599255,65.43799472295514,10.164619255077623,32.53555869178376,9.820803871038708,2.9409084739522613,3076,113,596,59,43,991,302,758,0.077,0.8290000000000001,0.094,0.8358,5,0,1,0,0,0,60.0,7,0,0,2,28,19,0,1,50,0,66,8,2,8,7,110,114,57,1,12,19,15,6,0,0,9,0,1,10,2,33,37,0,2,16,8,0,14,13,6,1,1,44,12,85,13,112,57,11,107,0,0,3,7,61,44,1,12,47,420,118,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05689298697332821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04655939417302362,0.0,0.06308253960892271,0.07074501145346948,0.039592345794214695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05182912430177437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04476843360454832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119048914652795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317886064249967,0.0,0.17942732824629187,0.0,0.1003046481157696,0.2441748706532917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0515666153650845,0.0,0.0,0.038454488723773585,0.15799295973070948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977134669502914,0.0,0.08831501544176175,0.0,0.055901388133974036,0.06377837133153749,0.0,0.04952283955333935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1520906138367039,0.055850986128718326,0.13235357571437567,0.0,0.04656473380660765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2574236407613116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03902437737075045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20153800411268916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06076770409032919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0606283183481335,0.06399359000692131,0.0,0.0,0.06164774047285184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04949749884852661,0.0,0.05509021436678235,0.0,0.059027059186514325,0.058490922329510336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17601953096684794,0.0,0.17636014791481466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042799208919164035,0.043170209358912914,0.044903703020009296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055864717526807016,0.06628511042606597,0.12218650524911301,0.06200357341665744,0.0,0.08855954311136563,0.0,0.0,0.1292952873649518,0.0630477797775163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100755200806778,0.1312710890734748,0.11151944368614712,0.059231791519535226,0.0,0.05570973160863359,0.0,0.058528288208749876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459585745663172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190631790620147,0.0,0.05538160042684783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06073730685608441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04482144868591919,0.0,0.0,0.04120919560338261,0.0,0.04649544720287651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636844358364098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04377502294047204,0.0935918326989362,0.20355123711817086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07735902618129371,0.07461146249424637,0.2288077481382029,0.04622105156657505,0.10184757819879424,0.0,0.0,0.3894293052847623,0.0,0.11858491941640385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400656340760438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034340314370851895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1046955254038448,0.0,0.0,0.06500178110148118,0.0,0.11224612925758136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1654344014439798,0.0,0.07074501145346948,0.11247744235358416
mentalhealth,moonmoonofficial,2020/04/14,"Personality to numbers? So numbers 1-10 have a personality type to me (2 is ultra-feminine, 1 and 10 are leader-types, 3 is kinda stupid, 5 is a diva, and 6 could probably be considered an e-girl). I know that sounds stupid but I’ve done this since i was little and I’m just now questioning it. Is it a symptom of anything mentally?",1.2281722689075636,3.3758246323529413,4.683865546218488,78.78382352941179,82.08823529411767,8.003361344537815,25.890756302521005,8.841846274778883,2.338640336134454,257,11,52,7,7,95,51,68,0.10800000000000001,0.892,0.0,-0.6208,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,0,4,0,10,1,0,0,0,9,12,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,3,0,3,8,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,1,31,7,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383943633073276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.231297944881098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2964586419584582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15920883717445927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903505710234579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2919444988390726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5059011312896683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3123402885110457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3245247841080508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396387598697783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011041054437823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justputanything_,2020/04/14,"I think I may have an eating disorder, but everyone i try to talk to about it says I'm fine. Help? Advice? (delete if not allowed) For probably about 3 months now, I've been eating very very little. It's not because I want to get skinnier, food just honestly disgusts me. I could be starving and ready to eat but as soon as I see the food, I get sick to my stomach and feel like I can't even swallow a bite. I don't know what's wrong with me and I can see and feel the effects of malnutrition. I'm tired of this seemingly never ending loop and have no idea how to go about this. I smoke Mary pretty much every day because it is the only way I can get hungry enough to actually eat.

I'll take anything you wanna say into consideration, I just need some guidance. Thank you in advance <3

I'm in the U.S. btw",2.6558579881656783,3.8770145857988174,4.352189349112425,87.01396449704144,74.7396449704142,7.093491124260355,24.834319526627226,7.61054688173877,1.0986591715976337,631,20,137,8,13,213,111,169,0.12300000000000001,0.7240000000000001,0.153,0.7475,1,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,0,2,9,6,1,0,6,0,11,10,1,3,1,31,29,11,0,5,7,0,2,1,0,1,2,2,0,0,6,7,7,0,8,0,0,2,6,2,0,0,1,6,18,4,20,25,3,13,0,0,2,0,6,4,0,4,7,82,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.1252782958394867,0.0,0.0,0.12544938224260532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564405984851072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15651593278692144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249929399696164,0.0,0.0,0.0827931146024615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14713217695316247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5254504987338533,0.0,0.0,0.11370470045674692,0.13264867151894538,0.0,0.08479238147777671,0.0,0.10816390397960117,0.12267056946766013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12982343072863087,0.09171318582543296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31047009330342623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20121643702403405,0.0,0.07296010982316775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604898940985521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14492300458088164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07055312755523273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06271894939881373,0.1286683656303908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10247000203885047,0.0,0.0943725159288686,0.0951905741545696,0.09901293821866708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763716554569814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060646048926894,0.13841307183099738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20418249178982764,0.0,0.0,0.20460110446824145,0.11687040385959993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09652419177978062,0.1031852801166784,0.0,0.11819310727441247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08225936425616509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14755149225853306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08716015614280158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118503978806243,0.07572060201127839,0.10190038864803416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1403610628184955,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,makennaisugly,2020/04/14,"I’m embarrassed/scared to eat food in front of people and even alone. I don’t know what this means, but I get scared to eat food in front of people. I feel like they’re judging how I’m eating, what I’m eating, what I’m wearing, and how I’m sitting. I’m not the skinniest person either, so I feel like I’m not allowed to eat in a way? I just feel so judged, and it makes my stomach hurt. Sometimes I can only eat alone, but when I do I start judging myself and I feel as if I don’t “deserve” to eat in a way. I don’t know what’s going on and just want to know what’s wrong with me.",0.4840909090909094,1.6003586212121237,2.7672727272727293,96.5959090909091,80.21212121212122,5.406060606060606,19.575757575757574,5.565023196281405,-0.3921606060606062,446,10,113,2,11,153,63,132,0.13699999999999998,0.7979999999999999,0.065,-0.8641,1,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,1,3,0,5,11,2,4,0,27,25,14,0,2,8,0,4,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,7,6,9,0,8,0,0,3,5,3,0,0,0,4,14,2,14,25,1,13,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,1,4,62,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22484908494320546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7775126466305007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169591926574019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195435496940447,0.15509556523701218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26251696621757536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056712632166511574,0.0,0.06169118088601337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620448202092168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17896789483868386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606360274732783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07245763240276316,0.0,0.0,0.1182422250239661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08255678418626285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15050910765585382,0.09478123416416448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10867698349173296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10735822851369163,0.0,0.0768318929477704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06402530597606476,0.1723230769163335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11868183500101175,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IO_Psych_Greg,2020/04/14,"Attention all mental health, counselling, and trauma-related professionals [https://smuniversity.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV\_56y23k4D2Q33PLv](https://smuniversity.qualtrics.com/jfe/form/SV_56y23k4D2Q33PLv)

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\-Currently work, or have worked, in an emergency / trauma-related field.

\-Currently live and/or work in the United States or Canada.

Your participation in this study is greatly appreciated, especially given the current challenging times. The information you provide will greatly assist the researchers in further understanding how the personal characteristics and work outcomes of trauma / emergency workers may be affected by the COVID-19 (coronavirus) pandemic / crisis.",16.465941176470587,19.155955476470595,13.46,28.840000000000003,44.235294117647065,15.505882352941176,49.352941176470594,14.117786864225405,8.489988235294117,1061,55,98,37,10,323,121,170,0.113,0.779,0.10800000000000001,0.024,4,0,0,0,0,0,65.0,0,5,0,12,1,8,0,0,12,0,12,2,0,2,2,19,14,8,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,3,3,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,3,1,0,5,5,21,5,4,23,1,1,0,0,13,11,0,4,10,68,8,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1835135275018912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19520248608252755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14887872702097768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38593797485764897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18604657886445014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545529302817371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17638705654151604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186035022687294,0.0,0.18624213193378816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056553961593775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784190037656808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041204681740766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822103202460979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6371123413011454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11271229320457288
mentalhealth,RoutineAssignment,2020/04/14,"I've never heard of someone with the same anxiety as me and I wonder if I need help for it So... I have this really weird food anxiety. I don't think it fits the criteria of an eating disorder. Food anxiety is the best way to describe it.

Basically, I get extremely anxious and stressed when I can't immediately access food, and this happens even when I'm not hungry AT ALL. The prospect of getting hungry and not being able to eat, even if it's mild hunger, just makes me want to throw up from stress. I carry snacks around with me everywhere I go. If I have plans at a place where I can't bring my snacks, I don't go. I stay home. 

I've been this way as long as I can remember. The thing is, I have NEVER been food deprived in my life. I had all the food I needed and wanted. Even when I went vegetarian in 8th grade, my parents immediately began cooking vegetarian food for me to eat.

My dad always joked that I must have died from starvation in a past life. Ha-ha. 

So whenever I leave my house, I assess how hard the logistics of getting food would be, then determine if I want to go out or not. Most places I can bring snacks, but this has certainty caused me to miss events.

Also, some days I compulsively check my pantry/fridge to make sure there is still enough for me if I got hungry. Sometimes I hide non perishables in my room in case my family eats all the food, so I'll be guaranteed to have some.

Also to be clear, I don't compulsively eat or eat too much or anything like that. I am on the thinner side of normal, and when I do eat, it's perfectly normal portion sizes and I don't eat until I start getting hungry. I'm not having an issue with the food itself, it's the idea of not having any.

Does it sound like I need help? How do I even begin to explain this? Thank you guys.

edit: I'm 25F if that's relevant",2.4037220843672458,3.9288049946949637,4.239375374347567,86.32895610507403,75.9761273209549,7.623136818687433,23.036621887567385,8.360895534625662,1.2231953281423795,1421,41,309,26,31,482,183,377,0.064,0.823,0.113,0.9741,1,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,1,0,3,21,12,0,2,15,0,31,24,0,5,9,60,63,33,1,16,16,2,1,2,0,2,2,2,2,1,17,12,22,0,5,2,1,7,13,5,0,0,7,3,47,7,39,50,11,43,0,2,0,0,8,17,0,13,18,204,64,2,0.06015340717787241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09620931597463428,0.05005245356096871,0.0,0.0,0.040906379629179083,0.0,0.1380515755318698,0.06795622812437445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04950112870492936,0.05354928565122029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312728966287443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0617941191902858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0387939712625138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624297396524241,0.0,0.06894101607263825,0.0,0.052640651988013744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4924156228602277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06215454963405383,0.0,0.15892303248276055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056707278771156215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6546396485857355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12571069004046087,0.0,0.10255970260499188,0.0,0.04811017483846824,0.0,0.0,0.05956133041129801,0.053193459307714616,0.0,0.053885637498084685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08063912170384832,0.0,0.06033877200843664,0.0,0.0,0.06940895553221949,0.0,0.06790587480593135,0.0,0.06278452874787357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06369377273503386,0.0,0.0,0.08497626087465357,0.05877583256229616,0.0,0.0,0.05323387243508452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803057327801833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044219675615474525,0.13380896766401293,0.09278803191099724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11787513451331827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679323999523358,0.0,0.057423233651176214,0.0,0.0,0.12569501500159133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038535812954166866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814208412660792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05096778669662681,0.0,0.05949325781755462,0.0,0.0425768912083857,0.06411552838611201,0.04803858867557265,0.0,0.13781104937020966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05669387437881225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055381175464251066,0.0,0.0,0.039963250840999706,0.038543874431454815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10644011422364504,0.09549394941432232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05576281110508578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523380411184755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042731254573594266,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ClumbusCrew,2020/04/14,"I used to(and occasionally still have) huge meltdowns in class starting since Kindergarten. Anyone else like this?  When I was younger(and occasionally to this day) I would have meltdowns in school where I would get overwhelmed by something (say, the class going too fast or any variety of things that were often super innocuous and seem to come from nowhere), I would go into a huge fit that would usually end up with me getting sent to the guidance counselor to calm down. Spent a lot of time in that room. To this day I still have episodes every once in a while. Anyone else like this? P.S. I'm 14 now.",4.397767857142854,6.809334669642857,3.738714285714289,88.20628571428574,72.83928571428572,6.265714285714287,26.378571428571423,7.1686216300943375,1.1732650000000002,481,17,91,5,10,142,76,112,0.0,0.8290000000000001,0.171,0.9463,0,0,1,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,1,5,0,9,0,0,1,0,13,20,4,0,4,1,0,0,2,0,4,0,1,1,0,8,4,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,1,0,0,4,1,7,4,17,12,1,28,0,1,0,0,2,12,0,4,14,57,15,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11313004657721352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23264461796896416,0.3409095784263408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14330382913186895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21457600577845826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779437406948705,0.0,0.1473449850231834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14016490741282894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17383176351038518,0.0,0.18909167775828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1625495273760189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414327501404986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17716725311095613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13229561343514032,0.0,0.16836451969953806,0.0,0.15144728262924104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376141538116247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280715369544271,0.0,0.0,0.11774998739027473,0.0,0.2657095457303465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052174428543762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09700546098222183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368104442440416,0.1832212948327826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4727075692384368,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,silver-23,2020/04/14,A dump question sorry I have been abused since i was a kid  by my own parents which caused several mental health issues from beating to mocking my face ( telling me am ugly and other hurtful stuff) to threatening to burn me with hot spoons to telling me am not good enough for my dreams i feel bad for saying this but i don't love them i mean i dont wish them bad but i honestly envy others for their parents and how they love them and not put them down,4.5016129032258085,4.987828569892471,4.792634408602151,88.30895161290327,69.75268817204301,7.490322580645162,27.32795698924731,7.1686216300943375,1.2026215053763436,359,11,76,3,6,113,64,93,0.354,0.593,0.053,-0.9818,2,0,0,0,1,0,2.0,0,0,6,1,1,9,2,0,2,0,7,4,1,2,0,14,12,6,0,1,4,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,5,4,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,5,0,0,2,3,19,4,11,10,2,2,0,1,0,2,15,1,0,1,0,54,24,0,0.0,0.20258541079063586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855252332957816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17564535303153428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2003893338190481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1766698507243325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645350859798151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434113770239538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18174560135883386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18303949625521165,0.0,0.0,0.17846052118455258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086354040817567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18624924725868566,0.0,0.0,0.17230938541691204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37970999094448094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718838809879517,0.19153868740317695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359715477432393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193160705840656,0.0,0.1414378678119696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19140006703698112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1957331930371117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29889116602029275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19662057058900945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Skincarenewbie2244,2020/04/14,"Baseline query Any one know if its possible to permanently increase your baseline level of happiness. Or is it embedded in personality to be a certain way...? I generally feel quite flat and have a feeling that something's missing. I have done for years. Besides the usual- exercise, diet and sleep...is there anything obvious I am missing?? Im don't take medications and am very bad with keeping a routine of taking them so I probably won't go back to them.",4.10779411764706,6.663282764705888,6.045514705882354,70.6435661764706,74.29411764705883,8.955882352941178,36.507352941176464,9.516144504307137,4.265147058823532,365,22,59,10,8,126,67,85,0.09699999999999999,0.784,0.11900000000000001,0.2136,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,2,1,3,5,0,0,4,0,9,3,0,0,2,13,18,6,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,3,4,1,1,3,1,0,2,2,3,0,1,1,2,7,2,8,15,1,8,0,2,0,0,4,2,0,2,3,40,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14907877974856856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804013928977416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685685280612015,0.1830415842674812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2243406731766248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22169090971884528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458916721816245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333663686429858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367978588689977,0.0,0.0,0.19485498137451854,0.0,0.0,0.12047892235973592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22084354950823945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485508019451762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1914165827728574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2471403674469679,0.0,0.0,0.2363588732709906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2331700543977285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21938076437271534,0.0,0.0,0.16876814805038126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32965599145604285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24144255115268,0.18088147558134648,0.0,0.17400857251498106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411720667968307
mentalhealth,BasicBrooke,2020/04/14,"Average Not sure what this is but I’ve realised that I’m not actually good at anything. 
Like I’m very average at a lot of things and bad at a lot of things too but there’s nothing I’m amazing at.  Most people have one thing that is “their thing” they are amazing at, but I’ve realised I’ve just stumbled through life being average or shit at pretty much everything. 

I’m dyslexic and most people that are dyslexic are meant to be creative. I’m awful at anything creative or talent worthy. 
I know my boyfriend finds it annoying when I say this but....yeah....I don’t have a skill lol",1.1053874092009686,3.56046455084746,2.6971428571428566,90.73762711864408,85.6949152542373,5.405326876513318,25.37772397094431,6.868970318607317,1.1392571428571436,459,20,93,6,14,150,68,118,0.21100000000000002,0.603,0.18600000000000005,-0.5432,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,1,4,9,2,0,3,2,10,2,1,0,1,18,17,8,0,0,8,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,11,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,1,5,6,11,14,5,8,0,0,0,0,3,7,1,6,2,59,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.1920083878591648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32383176163889266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16428553497952034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17683428984475075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983414894046593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16503210258914813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813359320962614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13897669091828665,0.09612650205360664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345549080651125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446404943513291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18879555402849146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13332898131791215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2728158137458977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20017462525725066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15647064327831856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2019702719925752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854430160942636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5228717105745181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234677001233688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hunterrified,2020/04/14,"Healthygamer and how to reach a broader audience to tackle the rising mental health crisis. Mental health is a very sensitive topic and as a result of that, it is difficult to experience and portray it in front of others. While the Internet has been helpful in logically understanding the issues that are present in today's individuals, it has always struggled with actually portraying how they affect humans. 

For the past months I have been watching a channel called Healthygamer, run by the psychiatrist, Doctor Alok Kanojia (Dr K) and what he has been trying to do with his approach to helping the audience with their problems has been enlightening to me. 

It is basically the evolution of group therapy in which everyone present gets to experience the other's problems and struggles right in front of them, but broadened to the whole internet. Through conducting therapy sessions live on [Twitch.TV](https://Twitch.TV) that allows the patients to express their fears openly I believe it has created something beautiful. 

[https://youtu.be/q4kSZoa-EXA](https://youtu.be/q4kSZoa-EXA)

I would love to hear more opinions about the subject. Do you believe that conducting therapy sessions in front of thousands is helpful or dangerous? Is it even moral to give advice like this over the Internet without a safety network present?",10.997800650054169,12.648407530516437,9.137089201877934,58.737009750812604,55.85446009389671,11.812062116287468,45.02311303719754,11.51311941424646,6.003991260382809,1096,61,138,28,13,331,130,213,0.096,0.7859999999999999,0.11900000000000001,0.8106,0,0,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,4,0,4,9,1,3,17,0,19,5,0,5,0,24,24,11,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,1,4,1,0,1,15,9,0,0,3,1,0,6,1,7,0,1,4,2,10,2,33,19,2,23,1,0,1,1,17,10,0,2,8,108,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.12323982049196915,0.0,0.0,0.12340812304962825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050825425455915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28456885266237825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289551616454645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12926211544690708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834126757742348,0.0,0.0,0.1206745259387303,0.0,0.2470696975918287,0.0,0.1421102053346542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598077613978177,0.12114789072064686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684785460595939,0.1423368512596503,0.0,0.25394651014346115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13181287717128345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06169841322920067,0.0,0.11151547710404923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398072901195655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545391631119449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008026535838244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055711486560705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2416829834103481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785009312722553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722342153150856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640493102406913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4332673413254458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11970718006222512,0.0,0.0,0.08574192301317374,0.0,0.0,0.1314712749767013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10420162898532673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099712859824415,0.0,0.12173806358381238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08971206319159943,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chemist-hippy,2020/04/14,"Finally seeing a therapist.. will they lock me up?? Ok so not really the first time in years, but I don’t really count that last one I saw. She was so rude and not helpful, I felt worse when I came out than when I went in. And so, since then, I’ve been terrified to try again. 

I have some in mind, and I’m ready to make the meetings. And I’m ready to stand up for myself and express when I do not like how the conversation is going. My main concern is that I want to be completely honest. I wanna strip down my mind and confess my childhood and figure out what the fuck is going on up there. 

My problem being is my mind is very dark. I have some visions of very violent self-mutilation, things that I wouldn’t even be capable of. Although these ideas flow through my mind, I would never hurt myself or another person. I love life and I haven’t had any self harm or suicidal ideation for almost a decade. I am terrified that it will not be seen the same way though. 

I am confident in my willpower to not hurt myself or anyone else physically. And I know this to be true. But I fear my therapist will not believe this and lock me up... 

Can someone give me guidance?",2.178426763110309,4.0053243713080215,3.6983484026522007,88.64835443037975,77.43881856540085,7.214707655213985,23.52200120554551,8.11559375814309,1.2286380952380958,904,29,194,16,21,299,132,237,0.184,0.6579999999999999,0.158,-0.9223,1,0,0,0,0,4,30.0,0,0,1,1,11,13,3,1,7,1,26,3,0,2,2,46,42,25,1,5,11,0,1,1,0,5,1,0,0,2,10,13,0,0,5,0,0,5,10,8,0,2,8,4,34,5,25,24,4,31,1,2,3,2,11,12,1,6,13,143,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165059020375399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261458469004032,0.12738856912598973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494577291966879,0.12447667127638948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1368730187452969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13894751675815803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273756652082082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10148588902520612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024029775590126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367054237783745,0.0,0.0,0.11664552507924003,0.1330818761572865,0.0,0.10333585293570713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231176614366704,0.0,0.116540354732593,0.1380864845280612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142944462116336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2601063584489007,0.13714280500893292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06676547897319884,0.09902723111127676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580909095734747,0.05935187910740675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964577684941178,0.0,0.08109278823995189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4906645492063931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936974231161884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232199665687835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607681063151568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11624560878414515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15565396946693627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680854139012926,0.0,0.2534725983243034,0.0,0.0,0.10049440010491976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293461725732506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13288586751566767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2821090099371089,0.08070984039707238,0.0,0.11935928970053032,0.0,0.07083941105108983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248095830616863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20047719747207135,0.07165553727528573,0.0964298606084476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261865563164435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380452106272302,0.08630010482188256,0.0,0.0,0.07823294293074455
mentalhealth,saint_xviii,2020/04/14,"sorry in advance if this sounds dumb what does a panic attack feel like?

i feel like i had experienced one a few days ago but im not entirely sure. basically, someone (who i wasnt close with or talk to in real life) kept pressuring me that he wants to call me. i barely knew him. and i repeatedly told him no because i was uncomfortable with it. i dont like taking calls from people i dont know or people i dont talk to in real life. i cant seem to talk whenever i do. so i avoid it. 

but he kept insisting. and i thought it was fine because he finally apologized saying he would stop asking. but a few minutes later he kept asking again and i kept repeating my side. then he called. and i had no choice but to answer because he said he needed someone to talk to (and im a sucker for people who need a shoulder to cry on) and he kept talking,saying something about frontliners and cried a bit but i couldnt focus on what he was saying no matter how hard i tried. 

there was this spot in my chest that felt hot, heavy and ""nervous"" (sort of like how your heart feels when youre nervous but i doubt i was nervous back then or i dont know) and i really forced myself to focus on what he was saying but i really couldnt. then the call was cut short because of wifi issues (thankfully) and when the call ended, i grabbed my other hand to grip it and was surprised my hands felt cold. a few seconds later i was full on crying. i dont know why i was crying. but it felt good to cry,the feeling in my chest went away.

after crying, the feeling came back and i had to listen to music when i slept that day (it was sort of 4 almost 5 am when he called tbh) because i couldnt sleep the feeling in my chest wouldnt allow me to. and now every time he messages me or whenever i see his name on my dms the feeling in my chest keeps returning. 

maybe it wasnt a panic attack but id like an outside perspective of what that is. im not really good with figuring out my emotions",1.7260814455231923,3.3779112791262165,3.737896440129453,88.64752966558794,78.1990291262136,6.519525350593313,21.881337648327946,7.3871296695380915,0.7202586839266454,1525,43,329,20,36,519,179,412,0.19399999999999998,0.7120000000000001,0.094,-0.9929,0,1,1,0,0,0,39.0,0,2,0,1,13,24,5,8,14,0,30,12,10,3,1,81,66,37,0,9,16,0,16,5,0,2,2,6,0,0,20,19,0,8,18,0,0,3,17,13,0,2,31,25,49,11,39,30,5,45,0,0,1,0,41,18,1,10,29,205,69,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056787462848345426,0.0,0.06414925172585582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11977941468104153,0.14576048378223855,0.0601887447896657,0.09852008083531118,0.0,0.1952592584550334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993956178020011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3924893109675385,0.07327033279717365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35184775668838064,0.08262991185423944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05606144836636423,0.0,0.375403348199028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206159082734424,0.056740282215897976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05397534501848023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267431622321755,0.09153239972930917,0.18452988526738492,0.07017724089512471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10746502336943824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05738733792612132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07591426655499572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075951940649221,0.06686451409087563,0.0,0.056941615190502226,0.0,0.0,0.10562107861726346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090498352157109,0.15648829269494605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.064359303331196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500293339022037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04341034825455527,0.0,0.0,0.15032687470375705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332384306134526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14583409958769525,0.12312006443296783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609380238656331,0.2037800048927115,0.0,0.0,0.05104944809923902,0.058320013781683465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410867701195437,0.0,0.10855974743213373,0.04931837449014388,0.0,0.07171262525986917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05355904487685171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0603780650722303,0.0,0.04816696108644674,0.2059637601903348,0.0,0.05898006182492989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050858399211106416,0.03735530755762419,0.0,0.0,0.06121437990883818,0.0,0.043494172515810385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03778567034097218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059386497649058574,0.0578063624728082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04550809937637155,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sandddmannn,2020/04/14,"cant distribute reality from dream Hello. Recently I have been struggling to separate my dreams from reality. It all started a couple of weeks ago but I just shrugged it off as nothing. But now it has gotten to the point where I struggle to remember if I even did that certain thing or if that certain event even happened. I am really unsure what to do or if I should tell anyone about it. I came to this Reddit for help because I couldn't find anything else online.

I am 19 and have never been diagnosed with a mental disorder before. ",3.6859508547008564,5.780069625000002,5.141666666666668,78.78111111111113,73.90384615384616,8.083760683760685,28.863247863247857,8.841846274778883,2.5868004273504264,427,18,76,9,9,143,76,104,0.107,0.777,0.11599999999999999,-0.036000000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,2,3,0,12,1,0,0,4,19,16,9,0,5,8,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,3,0,0,2,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,5,0,10,2,13,9,1,11,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,5,7,62,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17641582121546176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915672904972384,0.0,0.1637733454894606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12131840622025768,0.0,0.1693480971174787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276214728181009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22020759984054533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20199721694809067,0.0,0.0,0.2280897656084013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16625246761608978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26289659838039303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18189716818495552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598933634243366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13339633948039548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20056148395791049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15349353444069647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19096137661296506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18813460245196492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12749485059785182,0.0,0.19650445221343352,0.0,0.2254465176453147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408646650322492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4161098107849521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17394889910928918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13221749600657642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596387620896579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,seedless_watermelonn,2020/04/14,"Should I bring this up to my therapist? I was diagnosed with depression very recently. Although I technically match the symptoms, I still never really believed that diagnosis. I know that the stigma I grew up with of “just getting over it” probably contributes to me not really being at peace with the diagnosis, but something else that has popped up in my mind is Borderline Personality Disorder. I feel that the way that my symptoms are more anger induced than sadness, and also all the the symptoms that show up situationally in someone with BPD is more aligned with what I am feeling, more so than just depression. However I don’t believe in self diagnosing so I won’t ever bring myself to believe I have that either without a professional giving me a formal diagnosis. **Should I bring up  to my therapist how I believe my symptoms are more akin to something she didn’t diagnose me with? I don’t want to challenge her or anything like that but I just don’t feel like I have depression, despite sharing quite a few of its symptoms. Stuff is really confusing**",5.79465635738832,7.8252960257731985,6.8498762886597975,68.98807903780072,68.12371134020619,10.327972508591067,36.129209621993134,10.504223727775694,4.463432714776633,855,45,138,25,15,286,105,194,0.156,0.777,0.067,-0.971,1,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,2,9,10,1,1,9,0,18,8,0,2,3,30,28,9,0,3,9,0,3,2,0,3,8,0,0,2,13,7,0,0,5,1,0,4,8,6,0,0,2,3,27,4,27,22,7,19,0,4,0,0,6,10,0,2,6,117,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08038598135362766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271957385305795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4530074500160202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12660169464817445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2597337472635485,0.3060777134797869,0.0,0.0,0.11520487753964224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08397174297271273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092629132100297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247812628670554,0.07181166323089842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05251766465218634,0.09642815181057814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05524328252566265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821820127361404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149676424854452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07752738835606908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08777037638703053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10837779553314096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069156242380427,0.0,0.0,0.1931874752584624,0.0,0.09925158760568804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10486450915273354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129889357307054,0.0,0.0,0.08517045380742383,0.1547707483013796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08027557527895315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11507159940801467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5223949707151134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334234394580873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08293970649374402,0.059289428475691526,0.07978826955830205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09689790227924322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mashelp216,2020/04/14,"I'm fairly certain I'm a masochist. Throwaway account because I know I have people who follow me a bit on Reddit, and I don't want them to worry, even if some of them already know.  


I'm a 17M, and have grown up in a small mountain town for a few years now, and all in all, I live a pretty introverted, asocial lifestyle. I feel no motivation to really do anything other than things that give me an adrenaline or dopamine rush; everything else just seems bland, and pointless. I mean, after all, why should I do school work when I know I can pass no problem even if I hand in nothing? It sounds like a flex, but I honestly hate it; none of my work has any meaning to me, and I have to do something incredible before I see any point in talking about it.  


To the point though, lately (the past eight months or so) I've been experiencing really unhealthy behavior. Whenever I disappoint either myself, or someone else through a variety of means - losing a round in highly-competitive games, upsetting my girlfriend, disappointing my parents through a lack of effort - I start feeling disgusting. I start feeling like I'm absolutely worthless, and that I **deserve** punishment. I've thought about suicide, but never actually tried or truly wanted to try. This obviously leads to self-harm; I've scratched, and I've even bit myself to the point of blood. I've slammed my forearm against my desk, and I've even felt the need to push all my furniture to the side and lie on the floor because I'm scared I might use something to hurt myself.  


Lately, and this is where the issue comes into play, I've actually started enjoying it, in a really sick way. The adrenaline rush from hurting myself, or even just eating insane amounts of really spicy food so that my mouth burns, is honestly one of the best adrenaline rushes I've ever felt. I hate it, since it makes me feel even more like scum.  


I've tried seeking help before: my girlfriend is convinced my only problem is that I've convinced myself that I need help, my best friend is supportive but thinks I'm melodramatic, my dad tells me to 'cheer up', and my mom is convinced it's just me being a teenager, despite having mental health support qualifications through her government job. I feel so lost, and I need advice.",6.828364485981313,7.061932658878504,7.10502429906542,74.615676635514,64.70093457943925,9.932112149532713,35.110654205607474,9.692545771848811,3.3526509158878497,1790,77,322,33,25,581,221,428,0.19699999999999998,0.652,0.151,-0.9744,2,0,2,0,0,4,61.0,0,0,2,9,20,32,4,2,22,0,20,8,4,4,8,67,61,27,1,11,14,3,10,3,3,2,2,1,0,0,17,14,2,0,17,2,1,9,5,15,0,2,5,13,48,17,40,53,15,42,0,7,2,0,16,19,0,10,16,203,65,8,0.0,0.0,0.1527401733908887,0.0,0.0,0.07647438156432827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636142163501187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643843188310904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440098786007348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954126592803476,0.0,0.13318632179118722,0.0,0.16425725722142076,0.0,0.17087844210695438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06741372127532287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08007911480908853,0.13075171807295194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31013839138750204,0.07079029437370514,0.0,0.0,0.07033468796205168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19785204199593973,0.05590867840011012,0.15028298964641465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09463182661865346,0.0,0.06046317772023761,0.0,0.0,0.07507374548560725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15453031823168958,0.0,0.08318630194602622,0.0,0.0,0.10491152896437646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675570543627298,0.0,0.0,0.08168269652585916,0.07766058362848789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1290282989225393,0.0,0.17656048938051094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147010718242434,0.0,0.06910466617301708,0.0,0.0,0.08755248145272541,0.08542960500044415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052238894921964485,0.0,0.0,0.25574296165371363,0.0,0.0,0.07886727632612799,0.08302107505450172,0.0,0.09165670508652296,0.06246607113347076,0.0,0.0,0.1740855194124277,0.0603586329544157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07509220294816478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053030734624639565,0.059519957127898385,0.0,0.0,0.08689803143094113,0.0,0.07470764950228906,0.05425535722674922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22194187117002728,0.0,0.0,0.07961815447530009,0.0,0.14976774813676955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20054043107039127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07835151843636848,0.07920289968828301,0.06236277394068074,0.07124460637878527,0.08164183718951908,0.0,0.0,0.06473715506973267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06630911048251344,0.1204961367445822,0.0,0.0,0.16617765648389352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560330727837823,0.17761614769299758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290210714792183,0.06840234536535983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05199220501822629,0.050145595752711235,0.07688966587480629,0.06212938574421933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15939940681048534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759117282526265,0.0,0.0,0.09231908690140214,0.06211883282097596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061712221093583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11394785095324075,0.07947642904115662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05039662063539418
mentalhealth,Happy-Camera,2020/04/14,"Am i a psychopath? I was held in a hospital just 3 weeks ago for suicidal ideation and self harm. About 5 months before this i was catching a torturing lizards in my area. I killed alot. I feel remorse about it though and it makes me sick i did it, then i got a cruel pleasure out of it. I generally have a lack of remorse towards other people and what i do to them, until along time later. If i feel like they will hurt me i hurt the 10x worse and feel good that i won. I tell lies about myself to make people like me, ect ect. Manipulation and harm. Im just very confused. (self harm and suicide was completely hidden i did not tell others about it until someone saw)",1.8095927601809945,3.852783352941177,3.3267647058823537,89.84447963800908,79.44117647058823,5.949321266968327,22.961538461538463,7.010146845296331,0.7042427601809953,520,17,110,6,13,171,85,136,0.35700000000000004,0.55,0.09300000000000001,-0.9922,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,0,0,2,1,7,14,3,1,7,0,9,1,0,3,0,23,18,11,3,2,4,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,2,10,8,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,9,0,0,9,4,21,5,16,8,2,14,0,2,1,0,6,5,0,3,10,76,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14853414531325385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258344117021865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17568621058087086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541740738322787,0.11970676343273337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405435689201022,0.1340151278844072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35875848333494925,0.0,0.1809963747568664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18538320361767155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637252565345159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22369868919665625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13374687819005845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23233363400298576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34960869655041765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14197525731442764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665726018453773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929142168697419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16462941544472676,0.0,0.09770710651051924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13825670340629348,0.0,0.0,0.1344086200573433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17076061681590166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dudermcbroblast,2020/04/14,"Need help with where to start looking to get mental health help I'm in the USA in the Midwest and I've been struggling for years with a lot of mental health issues that I don't really know how to handle coming from a backroad country family that thinks mental issues are something from a science fiction book and that physically pushing yourself through things can be a cure all. I want to start going to some sort of therapist or counselor but I don't even know where to begin looking for one. I went to my family's regular doctor a year ago to ask about depression and she gave me a medication (paxol I think it was?) and after a few months I told her I thought it made me feel even worse and she told me to just stop taking it. I'm 19 and my mom has finally decided to open up on how to help me fix my health issues and I was hoping this sub would be able to send me in the right direction and give me some good tips. Yes I'm insured and in a more or less safe/stable life situation and afraid of having another complete breakdown, but I want control of my life and to feel genuinely in control.",5.541768543956046,5.397746370535717,6.3541071428571465,80.19666208791209,67.4375,9.392307692307693,30.62362637362637,9.057496981413335,2.3831274725274727,873,30,176,14,13,289,129,224,0.063,0.843,0.094,0.6187,0,0,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,9,5,0,2,11,1,12,7,0,5,1,44,42,17,0,5,5,1,2,0,0,1,7,0,0,0,8,15,0,3,8,1,0,5,2,3,0,1,9,4,22,2,33,30,7,26,0,1,2,0,13,11,0,7,10,116,30,2,0.10629459534677567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09422374532602784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11145915121759473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937109793359934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09156338192455464,0.11144786088178847,0.0,0.2384368541886139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155137921718157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10879702242508407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14041315547668204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004101690324251,0.0,0.10749148240513293,0.0,0.0,0.11644053356361905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05553453892105596,0.10196746152510247,0.060409668095483635,0.08915486346395737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3389585528827718,0.0,0.0,0.21374108000110928,0.0,0.0,0.10557451710822567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33283182401751704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683345951753338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150158032396143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785213782267472,0.0,0.0,0.09036786383312806,0.0,0.10057851621291394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070806220532824,0.32135985406173045,0.0,0.0,0.1244909453894166,0.08484333189620362,0.0,0.0,0.07881609559570703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202796873272474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06809503960781431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09077500364234464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947957873873828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183077258202211,0.0,0.0,0.15047172336345518,0.0,0.0,0.08886704126681738,0.0,0.1111221900874123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992030717516523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341621785282715,0.07061740599871373,0.1362185694211355,0.0,0.08438603548382279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20313808201731048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12539061266706122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853615480644212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10832327365969796,0.0755086307934205,0.0,0.0,0.13690046879624326
mentalhealth,Foyers,2020/04/14,"How can I stop feeling so numb I get in this state where I just want to cry and my whole body feels like.. I don't know how to describe it other than grey. It comes out of no where and I haven't been able to find out how to feel better. 

Does anyone have any advice for me? I used to just go to the gym to get my mind of things, but I can't really do that because of Corona. 

Thanks in advance",0.12681818181818372,1.5543898636363664,1.9750000000000008,100.49500000000002,82.18181818181819,4.854545454545455,15.545454545454547,5.148860815047168,-1.124777272727273,300,4,78,1,8,99,60,88,0.083,0.8079999999999999,0.109,0.2967,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,8,4,0,0,1,0,7,2,1,4,0,20,18,7,0,1,3,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,5,1,0,3,4,1,0,0,1,4,10,3,16,17,1,11,0,0,1,0,0,6,0,0,2,53,16,0,0.22722123793464585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.222037963949953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15451823354381436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15887837272083488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851195765367846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20095872001515155,0.0,0.25239157198401874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19573097693730654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24959186038384976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19884283653351006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3446696554021745,0.16232689778146106,0.0,0.0,0.20767609501246104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374274372202101,0.0,0.12913506583374226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12487485002014515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100881946681412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22942867682019585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14556374335325653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18996712920689449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20919478775413305,0.0,0.0,0.15095569401636516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19624619497558848,0.0,0.0,0.1340209732331306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2536843976158191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,weirdlittlesnowflake,2020/04/14,"Reliable resources for mental disorders? Hey guys, so a quick backstory. I got diagnosed with depression and some other small stuff a few months ago. Well it wasn't a real diagnosis I guess, because I was at the hospital at the time and the people who diagnosed me didn't even knew everything about me. I'm pretty sure they were right about the depression though.

Right now I can't see my therapist anymore because of the lockdown, the last time I saw her was like 6 weeks ago and I'm really struggling with that. I'm on medication against the depression and that issue is actually starting to get a bit better, but I just know that there's something else going on with me.

So I started to read more about mental health and came across personality disorders. I never really heard anything about that before or would have considered it to be something that could affect me. Just for fun (at first) I took a test about personality disorders. I had very high scores at borderline, avoidant personality disorder, paranoid personality disorder and ocd. I didn't take that seriously though and thought it was just some test I couldn't trust.

But then I read more about these disorders and it was like I was reading an explanation of myself when I read two of them. Especially BPD is something I can extremely relate to. But I still don't trust something I only found on the internet and I would never call my therapist to ask her stuff, because I'm wayy to anxious to do anything like that. So I was wondering if someone maybe knows some resources, tests, idk anything I could trust on that topic. I know it's not the same as actually seeing my therapist, but I just can't right now and I'm literally going crazy here and I need to know what's wrong with me. 

I would really appreciate it if someone could help me. Thank you, have a great day :)",5.452758620689656,6.944766896551733,6.250294252873566,75.04413103448279,68.25287356321839,10.050758620689656,31.448735632183904,10.264317810270406,3.376159632183908,1472,61,268,39,25,484,169,348,0.114,0.768,0.11800000000000001,0.353,0,3,4,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,2,2,24,19,0,2,16,0,28,4,0,1,3,55,58,26,0,10,12,0,0,3,0,3,4,1,0,5,20,16,0,1,8,4,0,4,10,7,1,2,19,4,40,12,34,31,8,37,0,3,3,0,16,14,0,8,22,187,60,7,0.0,0.0,0.13212395756398013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001765290124007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764777297890743,0.06713669687853817,0.0,0.0,0.16712525326248565,0.0,0.06328705093892831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380139945462902,0.0,0.05760470064220554,0.0,0.0,0.05987201680856955,0.07390700014383071,0.0,0.08526132045087438,0.0,0.06912565369247606,0.07742671470544267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16215034231959868,0.0,0.0,0.043658615752328496,0.0,0.17492058316348255,0.13742096204106022,0.0,0.0,0.4655160426742113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056551704985555284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04471287279670777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060841212375684274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05758257355561425,0.0,0.07422567326653426,0.0,0.0,0.035368605828580695,0.0,0.07694691558137533,0.0,0.05414304255774001,0.07463558518341581,0.07457528190107529,0.06703013776362315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195817042903029,0.0,0.0,0.04537550957660628,0.07152502586732999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065751524240357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14881681409614936,0.055181649519278585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992192113561748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06801019222145227,0.0,0.0,0.06819706054759044,0.13644421685750974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05403466781791398,0.0,0.0,0.050196066668258064,0.10442336527509516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05148620768978039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04693220098356396,0.2364397477624562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887163625443726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27085911502427673,0.07705339113416143,0.13010425556214808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17343721863674835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10789062647747524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471798027982978,0.20846416636075926,0.0,0.0,0.09583180441192883,0.0,0.0540624797105416,0.0,0.0,0.07077103756271848,0.1549924989422384,0.0,0.0,0.06380311157798589,0.0,0.050899312339582135,0.0,0.0,0.06232580426336445,0.0,0.2358024202719655,0.0,0.0,0.13302285476857426,0.05374342678358554,0.07894869944168735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752132569723146,0.0,0.0,0.0661296038925166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05585666853130503,0.0,0.0,0.05430201612887143,0.0,0.060867246778300486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734139221919213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442688667849413,0.07401545089353301,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pl3ase__help__me___,2020/04/14,How can I make friends and start a conversation? I have no irl friends whatso ever. I’ve really been lacking human interaction and it’s taking its toll. It’s been this way for years now. I know how to keep a conversation but not start one.  I’m tired of people just telling me to wait it out. Is there any tips y’all know?? :) anything helps,0.17739130434782524,2.578436086956525,1.97926086956522,93.16193478260872,93.92753623188406,5.078840579710144,18.49420289855073,6.742157984588678,0.15549159420289893,266,8,58,4,10,87,53,69,0.076,0.755,0.168,0.7643,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,0,2,0,5,1,0,3,1,15,14,5,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,5,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,5,2,5,12,1,7,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,0,5,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17990778524538778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177078126488177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23930689042147354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4087920575339646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17732693434845254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23515035608854,0.0,0.0,0.29078714122892113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1765938058801594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17927062335402236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18341046525528126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16948194448059534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3745095151109669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19891388773021734,0.0,0.2312344186691252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30406927449340193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20999297785828766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17036598983951387
mentalhealth,you-have-answers,2020/04/14,"Share your current anxiety experiences so I don't feel like I'm alone in this please. I feel like I'm losing my mind. It's been **three** days since I ate, I have absolutely no appetite even for food I love(and I love food a lot). I can't remember to drink water(I set alarms to remember now but I can't drink too much water or I'll barf) due to the multiple anxiety and panic attacks I deal with **daily**. It's been weeks since I had above 4 hours of sleep. I do not know what to do anymore. I try to paint or do something that's tasking but I feel nausea/sick 24/7 due to my high anxiety.

I also experience shivers all day(no, I am not sick, this is 100% stress induced) and since I lack appetite I've visually lost a lot of weight within the 3 days I did not eat(you don't say? but this stresses me out even more and I still haven't eaten anything). Along with my shivers I have the *lovely* feeling of 10,000 butterflies on crack in my stomach all the time. Does anyone else also feel that?

I would like to go out and walk in a nice park, but I'm too scared to go outside due to what's currently happening(plus I'm in a highly infected area unfortunately)

I just don't know what to do. **I am not looking for advice,** I just don't want to feel alone. 

Also to whoever reads this I hope you all stay healthy(to the people you love too) and you all overcome this challenge that we are facing worldwide.",-0.1820161545771306,2.117232153310109,1.878602312321828,93.21164436173584,96.8048780487805,4.839056065885335,20.1115774469433,6.574015621080383,0.4020808362369337,1096,39,233,16,44,363,150,287,0.185,0.723,0.092,-0.9724,2,2,3,0,0,0,49.0,1,4,0,3,13,18,1,5,9,0,22,16,3,1,4,45,45,15,0,4,12,0,7,3,0,1,2,1,0,0,13,11,8,0,11,3,0,3,12,8,0,1,7,9,34,10,28,37,9,28,0,2,1,3,11,11,0,5,15,145,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09085837496459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19259719510685527,0.0,0.223066732067342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21338691580041366,0.0,0.09221056160065157,0.06501334504079323,0.0952683635814854,0.07651410816782538,0.0,0.0,0.10577746877356584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17989202616771274,0.09585765905187298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136688284917126,0.0,0.0,0.18216879142830134,0.0,0.09514111904306613,0.07767234193285744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228240084203765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819033518333205,0.0,0.0,0.2820790123666005,0.13284897666230633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22486207303995495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105684649812802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19647564179869534,0.0,0.0923495048185232,0.09156596096892143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10219807230203788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362750868914335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807926254524106,0.10402014408211463,0.10149797782513582,0.15809548942463286,0.3356700858707977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388266932071868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683505433453206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109091270021855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06446019555711144,0.0,0.0,0.10206343910258607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0930045424942116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21065502674589068,0.0,0.0,0.0739409356531049,0.09308858071834586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23074051424079325,0.0,0.09304652955018447,0.0,0.0,0.0715800700193601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09910364879586543,0.07425345373561988,0.0,0.2130151334747993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054217024754208816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06312689634038977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05484164789891389,0.0,0.07458245097088696,0.11322383720997747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604988452041681,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SchizoShotz,2020/04/14,"Whats wrong with me? Back story:

 When i was younger i had this sort of 'episode'. I was lying in bed when everything just seemed off. Next thing i know there are bugs crawling everywhere, the room is shrinking and expanding, numbers and colours everywhere. Music started blasting and the voices awoke. I ended up having an accident out of fear and pure shock. Now i don't know what the duck it was so i just brushed it off and carried on like nothing happened. The music and voices never stopped.

I would get visions of hurting anyone i saw. Like if i saw someone walking down the street the visions would start flashing of me stabbing or killing them.

I would find myself doing thing i never would do. Started harming animals but couldn't stop it. Even this one time i made a nail bomb my shoving modified fire crackers under hedgehogs or inside when they curl up. Pretty funny tbh.

My behaviour became more dangerous to myself. I would walk out into traffic without caring for myself or anyone on the road(crossing without looking on main roads even though i know there are cars). Cars would end up slamming onto the brakes because i cant stop myself walking into traffic.


 So just after new years(many years ago), me and my family were living on a farm with a massive like 8-9 bedroom house. Now in this house there was no central heating so log fires were in every room. One night i was sent upstairs to light the fires to keep the house warm during the -40°c winters. The second episode hits... Again the rooms starts shrinking and expanding and the voices get louder and louder. Next thing i know i set the bed on fire and went downstairs as all was normal. I knew what was going on but couldn't stop it or myself. I go into the dining room to light the log burner in there. By this time i forget what just happened so as I'm lighting the log burner i hear crackling coming from the ceiling. It took a good few seconds to click before i realise what just happened. I ran upstairs as fast as i could but it was too late. The entire 2nd floor was engulfed in flames (singed some hairs when i went up). I ran back down screaming to everyone to get out. Thankfully no one was hurt and all made it out. The house continued to burn for 2 days.
No one knows it was me. They blamed faulty electrics.

We ended up homeless for a while after this and ended up moving back to UK. We were still homeless but managed to get by until we found somewhere to settle.

Now as i have gotten older the music, voices and visions are getting louder and stronger. Im losing control of my actions. I got really bad a year ago and ended up shoving a knife in my leg. Dont know why but i couldnt stop myself. Im scared that soon it wont be my leg next time. I feel as if i need to be sectioned before i end up hurting anyone else.

What ever is wrong it has cost me my jobs, education and life. I spend most of my days staring at my wall on what feels like a very bad acid trip 24/7 whilst simultaneously being on grams of sniff. It wont stop and i dont know what to do.",2.7302325581395337,4.897924523255817,3.5779152823920266,88.55763704318939,77.02325581395348,5.4960132890365445,24.703488372093023,6.367922702773337,0.8012039867109633,2401,84,462,18,56,764,281,602,0.13699999999999998,0.784,0.079,-0.9912,1,0,0,0,0,0,62.0,3,0,3,2,31,23,2,2,31,0,45,5,3,3,6,95,92,46,1,14,18,0,8,4,0,8,1,6,7,0,28,31,1,9,13,1,2,17,16,15,0,6,29,26,62,8,75,47,8,119,0,4,6,0,8,45,0,10,60,321,90,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095966677695874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296747113990852,0.06334031649010252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1426037371590606,0.10323166201218384,0.037683958755089564,0.0,0.1052059107245732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06302803881252565,0.0,0.0,0.05325112854473445,0.0,0.0,0.06933465816423175,0.0493570092019419,0.0,0.0,0.07973558372825974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14490154681512896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05164139002289707,0.0,0.32851683526214714,0.0,0.0,0.08166101813300784,0.05591833523057076,0.05208471781471381,0.05907018663174626,0.05555844476415255,0.0,0.05827694133016556,0.06956295279465947,0.06251454049323152,0.0441631193758221,0.0,0.0,0.05650095148055838,0.0,0.0,0.06778074938409538,0.0,0.0,0.16148796651014993,0.0,0.07026570957695627,0.05185039035167262,0.0494418687900699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639975770871061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06967389598656099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285320806569661,0.19853381637262354,0.0,0.13354908738252244,0.0,0.06134528169376601,0.05494708663920341,0.06839296558410526,0.0,0.2378166581567712,0.0,0.06973391423924016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04366420569600594,0.12080550575129388,0.0,0.05458683175775585,0.0,0.0519119360825308,0.06915904293739393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698824100022097,0.0,0.06267421451358543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06570323856129108,0.0,0.04583760396071115,0.09535641295080373,0.05970465280155485,0.1972338970021858,0.05801243596167894,0.060568964400846026,0.05931647854846681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16755915044565867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06289159681814975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0396024877106694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061891061656278626,0.0,0.0,0.05627720322545763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05237857960058756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502169349265326,0.0,0.04936830111576916,0.31009799802646576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05691413136486782,0.0,0.0,0.12320831161844932,0.0,0.06073632198019292,0.0,0.10814052151150948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868258241182612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05100670272879626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11461266142889302,0.055781543893057485,0.0,0.0,0.11918157672704345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26348435718093777,0.13517756072216824,0.0,0.0796181214419316
mentalhealth,eddielement,2020/04/14,"Coronavirus De-stress Care Package (Free) I work at a mental health startup and we've put together a free Coronavirus De-stress Care Package with dozens of different exercises and resources to help you improve your mental health during this pandemic. 

Some examples of things in the care package: 

* Progressive Muscle Relaxation
* Self-Compassion Break
* Expressive Writing
* Easy Exercise Ideas
* Healthy Eating Tips
* Managing News / Social Media
* Find a Therapist / Support

Would love to hear your thoughts on which exercises you find most helpful! The care package is available in an iPhone app [here](https://apps.apple.com/us/app/id1467988544?ls=1) or on the web [here](https://launch.uplift.app/COVID-19-web?format=web).  

Hope you will find at least one of the exercises helpful! :)",7.896048265460031,12.214242435897438,5.4496732026143775,68.24941176470588,77.63247863247864,9.248667672197085,35.94218200100553,9.168548406835145,5.007096933132228,643,34,78,19,17,182,83,117,0.0,0.635,0.365,0.9938,1,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,5,0,2,0,10,0,0,8,0,3,8,0,0,0,15,12,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,0,3,3,1,0,5,5,2,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,6,12,12,9,3,9,0,0,0,1,13,6,0,4,1,40,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5341458494004317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13683968757386542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13401883914773952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35912289144380505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27843793344565004,0.14761692991700287,0.0,0.26336682214594936,0.0,0.0,0.13008648159840053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14785341634679822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11820891875536788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639814599641921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875119949177325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316647892908609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366341807363022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335112394948758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000599656208687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14862745413993625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15207061317834916,0.08701313666972682,0.0,0.0,0.1039785239166677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15754528931153786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953504465211682,0.0,0.0,0.0930399908924935,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Phantommi_,2020/04/14,"I can't focus on learning because of my self-harm thoughts hello! 

due tomorrow, i have to learn a poem and ill need to say it to the teacher for a grade. the problem is, i cant study at all since my parents have been fighting, screaming non-stop. my dad got drunk, again, and my mum has been screaming at him. 

my mum has been saying that she's going to ""kill"" my dad and shit and he laughs it off. i can only think about selfharming now and i feel like shit. how can i make myself stop these thoughts? thank you for reading!",1.1415909090909082,3.2351179907407435,2.2242760942760955,96.6028787878788,82.05555555555556,4.668013468013468,21.855218855218848,5.565023196281405,-0.038862962962962655,405,13,90,2,11,128,74,108,0.21899999999999997,0.711,0.07,-0.9467,1,0,0,0,2,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,4,10,4,0,4,0,12,4,2,2,1,17,21,6,1,2,0,5,1,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,5,1,1,6,2,0,1,2,7,0,0,6,5,16,3,12,15,1,10,0,0,0,0,13,4,2,0,6,57,20,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607698621775512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10457559556571214,0.1477539297042829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175419089524164,0.0,0.16541472859944187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22881828937821075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10104295426218828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13805552606505825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335615348610326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15729771858567326,0.0,0.0,0.2296517462924423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19790105904314675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20687832122033556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32894687134936945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21576081957617785,0.0,0.42460034473920216,0.1710855869454733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34582549458621553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19041423440457464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13252341214008895,0.0,0.32838769065961604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,eli--4,2020/04/14,"I need help.. So..
I feel down most of the time, i lost interest in everything that i like
Anime, manga, tv-shows and gaming so on ..
I just don’t like anything, nothing excites me i hate myself so much i hate looking at my face in the mirror.. i wish death comes and takes me from this life everyday.
I try to eat but i don’t enjoy my food.
I listen to music to calm down but instead it just shuts me off for little bit then i lose interest !!
I DON’T KNOW WHY THIS IS HAPPENING!
I’m in a relationship i want to be with this person but i’m losing myself i wish to change or find help but I cannot afford therapy online and my family is against it. 
I’m lost..",-0.5851111111111109,1.5625807428571434,2.2776190476190514,92.58626984126984,91.57142857142857,5.396825396825397,17.063492063492063,6.937597516519254,0.09615873015873078,504,13,113,8,18,176,87,140,0.085,0.6940000000000001,0.22,0.9558,1,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,4,6,13,2,0,3,0,7,4,1,0,0,20,25,12,1,4,7,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,6,5,2,0,3,1,0,1,4,6,0,0,2,3,24,7,18,22,3,14,0,4,1,0,6,10,0,2,5,75,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1272897100473422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16887215609483475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16363253658876642,0.13324443179338527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15827780976037156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390177749510943,0.0,0.14581996938658653,0.0,0.07821162343862535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413761056629673,0.0,0.1870415062220913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13678435601044855,0.0,0.0,0.3054319515093979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20735952267555152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500891732404703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10925613102802684,0.15113915339673445,0.15503151788035666,0.0,0.0,0.12989351804630084,0.34609810651528755,0.3377062995863525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11370871401808602,0.11469438604262427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14842108883261412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506193565379684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607006298067228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11630125159730438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17689179709025238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901960373824868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501859753409212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09123516730090622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13957601132048064,0.0,0.3557522251341989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,1992lindsayb,2020/04/14,"BPD Hey. I have nowhere else to go and no one else to talk to without feeling like a burden or feeling like I’ll be judged. I just need to put this out there. I have been diagnosed with anxiety/depression (as it feels like the rest of the world has too) for a few years. I was just watching a therapist react to Trisha Paytas. Trish said that she becomes whoever she’s around and the therapist suggested that was a symptom of another disorder he didn’t want to get into. I have always had the same problem as Trish described and I feel like I don’t know who the fuck I am. It literally drives me up a fucking wall. I feel alone. So I looked up “what is it called when you act like who you’re around,” or something like that. Borderline Personality Disorder popped up. I read through all of the symptoms and traits and I truly believe this is what I have. I have been to psychologists and psychiatrists for years, but I’ve only been diagnosed with anxiety and depression. 

I don’t know if I’m looking for answers or what... I just needed this to be out there.",3.4294705882352936,5.127444204761908,4.736218487394961,83.10819327731096,73.61904761904762,8.369747899159664,28.54341736694677,9.007467420416297,2.348459383753502,833,34,167,18,17,276,116,210,0.152,0.823,0.025,-0.9519,0,1,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,0,0,10,11,2,0,11,0,20,6,0,1,1,38,38,16,0,5,9,0,5,6,0,0,4,1,0,1,14,14,0,0,8,1,0,4,5,5,0,1,8,9,20,6,28,28,4,17,0,1,3,2,12,10,2,4,9,119,34,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11595148155906852,0.0,0.0,0.09315542040686954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11739444278197175,0.08564516916130135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993271403269218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12364535813291624,0.0,0.1261348006162061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14100323967348946,0.0,0.11431843963527165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19285313106574994,0.2272636729570893,0.0,0.0,0.2566199608057365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18704785639854454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830387308468644,0.3199223261596139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20700094670589975,0.058491798839052526,0.0,0.06362653265561265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12305493742344027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3281729667119141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18802778859032185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16602623514771664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07586351736689619,0.08514672355964795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09775467423501268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071256908111517,0.0,0.1125455665520536,0.0,0.0,0.1119851666369708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10649471883353707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861883285916166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327279534912,0.0,0.08998508377844606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2599764661190776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06603388301155484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792049961817396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14419053146699984
mentalhealth,sabucoush,2020/04/14,"I feel so disgusted with myself. I am so judgmental in my head to my dorms mates. I am so materialistic and I keep looking down upon them. Yet, I also suffer from over looking their things specially their food. I really need to stop 
Well, I am so ashamed of myself. I was never raised like this before but recently I have become so materialistic and I would count and judge people upon food. I look at what they cook and their food. I hate myself for it and struggle with the thought. I feel so low because I am not a good cook and so whenever anyone cooks around me I cannot keep myself from looking. i have this feeling that I no longer stand eating in group with anyone around. I started to take my food to my room and eat there alone. They would still think I dont want to eat with them because I dont want to share. Part of it because my cooking is so terrible that I cannot let anyone taste it. I dont want another judgment or criticism from anyone. The other part is I think food is a scarcity and I dont have enough to share. What if I am still hungry? 

Recently, I had been invited to someone’s room and I couldnt help but keep looking around. My eyes just land on so much stuff that I am in a terrible situation where its awkward to keep turning around. It awkward that I try to look down but its just doesnt work. The other day I was invited in and I kept staring at a closet trying to figure out what is it? I know its none of my business but I couldnt help my eyes went to that direction. Same goes to their bathroom. They had stuff stored below the sink. I kept looking at it. I just felt so weird. 

The worst part is that I had noticed before someone checking out my things and trying to look the other direction. It felt awkward too. As I didnt know should I react? Should I say something? I just let go. Why be so sensitive. 

The worst part is that, I feel that my dormmates are able to feel that low energy of me. They notice my pettiness. They can see that I am looking at their things. I feel so horrible and so despicable with myself for being so low and cheap. Even though technically, I dont need any of their things. Honestly, I am financially more stable than most of them. Yet, its just being low that looking at their things seem interesting somewhat. I feel that they can see that through me. I feel so exposed, that even when they offer me things I automatically refuse to keep my dignity. Yet, since I moved to this place I became so stingy. I am unemployed living off savings. Trying to take advantage of anything and everything. I try to play it cool sometimes but there is just not much opportunity to hide my face expression of my eyes gazing. I am so disgusted with myself to look at someone else’d food. Not being able to share or offer any. 

I am avoiding the kitchen and food topics with all of them. I leave whenever they start cooking. I try to wake up early just so no one see me eating or cooking. Yet, we share the fridge so they can see what grocery I have. I dont buy many and I just eat outside. 

There are three or four girls I am talking about: one of them is unfortunately my crush. Whenever she says anything, a mean voice in my head replies with a disgusting response. I am paranoid if anyone could hear it or feel how I am feeling towards them. 

I wish I could up to people talk to them without thinking about their food or their belongings. Just straight to their face. I tried to pay for them few times to show them its not about money, but I deep down count every penny. I feel something isnot right. My instinct and my guilt to being mean and unforgiven to those around me. 

Why do I care anyone’s food or cooking? Why do I put myself in this competition? How is it that I need to see what everyone is storing in their room? Its none of my business! I wish I could clear my head when walking up to anyone without thinking about how will they “feed” me or offer me food. Or perhaps, what did they buy? Or how could they have been able to afford it since they are on minimum wage? 

My friend was telling me how she shops at some stores and I was literally replying in my mind: “oh yeah as if you can afford it” shame on me!!! Seriously I am a disgusting human being. I shouldnt be thinking that way. Its none of my business. Even if I am curious how did she do it, I shouldnt be going into that intrusive thought. 

All what I mentioned about food and material things are against my nature. I was never raised like that. I come from an upper middle class family. I was sent abroad for my higher education. I wear brands. I have suffient money and I am doing well in life. Why judge those people around me? With what they eat and what they wear? And what they buy? 

They stuff their things like in public that there is no way not to look. Its all over the room. You cannot just enter without noticing. Its awkward to look at it and awkward to try to look into the other direction. I feel so low.

Please tell me how to get over this disgusting habit. 

Thank you,",2.0089639639639643,4.2625084244244285,3.3189128128128167,89.06091576576578,79.87087087087087,6.238242242242242,22.60261261261261,7.404127859558343,0.8743370090090088,3912,126,807,56,100,1271,327,999,0.16899999999999998,0.768,0.064,-0.9987,5,2,2,0,0,0,105.0,1,3,38,3,69,49,6,10,19,2,93,39,11,8,6,160,168,77,0,24,38,0,14,3,2,7,1,4,7,2,74,45,27,10,27,10,13,9,31,28,2,4,22,43,174,21,125,123,21,92,0,6,23,0,71,62,0,18,21,622,248,6,0.10475398258885266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036164511271288856,0.0,0.027923907343244656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04749086688503002,0.03661456147080384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709083139809225,0.0,0.057469068035237325,0.1865065072761796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06385705549485057,0.03856418122231985,0.0594252824584857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035601222245433224,0.0,0.0,0.030078760149593424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115167082507426,0.0,0.0,0.02251921756301727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2455417748543651,0.0,0.0,0.21437895209763813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03607962217297153,0.0,0.06918901754159783,0.0,0.02941991611111018,0.03336563983231683,0.03138204165835698,0.0,0.03291757730635565,0.0,0.21186704440770648,0.0,0.06705350060230285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4644527490376893,0.0,0.0269775556982195,0.0,0.018243210780495945,0.0,0.0396894015744807,0.029287556858829587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034474290174163605,0.10750780766087137,0.0,0.03935511722173096,0.0,0.04680959094008254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15518358813288982,0.0,0.0,0.0383800328516777,0.0,0.0,0.03697311409351862,0.0,0.0714120296643756,0.02466361194860613,0.051177504564869934,0.0,0.030833228602628382,0.0,0.4105124912464626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03540136551912965,0.0,0.0760718644810427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035257220137023336,0.0,0.0,0.037112301799883785,0.0513374869003496,0.07767375075674049,0.053861819500469935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926310348213047,0.0,0.0,0.047322673104389694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125113992352687,0.0,0.07262322177063725,0.0,0.036481872018896515,0.03832947195065977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03510222858197716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022369361208481518,0.0,0.06895461346124601,0.0,0.0,0.029819776254947826,0.0,0.05553638098109928,0.0,0.0,0.13912560263244916,0.031788030488150966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05776905126352407,0.03924928848322954,0.0,0.0,0.08875770950801262,0.053763155742295725,0.03453478911092478,0.0,0.04943027202811956,0.0,0.05577111054112894,0.029193006672373643,0.0,0.03650386904331307,0.1199182478934815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05250797207522034,0.056131522129722534,0.061039732000893236,0.03214779767546517,0.0,0.0,0.1855837102366488,0.1118702037708456,0.034306752009509216,0.05544197402809793,0.02036096321892428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18965620785552134,0.037980750731111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06178661301300744,0.055432556988328885,0.0,0.0,0.06279094052995972,0.032369330448369565,0.12603223446232115,0.0,0.08030794014033196,0.10097910106106787,0.0,0.02542071564619864,0.0,0.0,0.04960948246168762,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fredwas,2020/04/14,"My parents don’t believe in mental health and their ignorance really saddens me I’m sorry if this doesn’t belong here but... Pretty much as the title says, my parents don’t believe that mental health is a thing and they certainly don’t think that I should have any mental health issues. 

I unfortunately suffer from Bipolar Disorder II, PTSD, and Tourette syndrome. I recently got medicated for Bipolar and have been doing so much better. I go to weekly therapy sessions and see a psychologist on a monthly basis. I moved to a different country to start a life away from my parents as they were one of the key problems surrounding my mental health. 

As an only child it’s near impossible to cut my parents off fully. They’re on mute in my phone so I don’t get notifications from them and I do feel I should keep them in the loop when it comes to my well-being. It’s comments like “what if you didn’t take you medication and you were just you” that really anger me because they have no idea what I’m going through. 

I have tried to explain what bipolar feels like. To which my mother has shot me down and dismissed the idea. I’ve sent them information to read and short videos to watch that explain it too. They don’t seem interested to learn about what I’m going through at all. It’s always dismissed. 

I’m sick of them asking me about it and then getting annoyed about it before turning their nose up and changing the subject. Why ask when you don’t like the answer?! 

I am so sorry to rant about this but I cannot take their constant criticism anymore. I can’t continue to “please” people that don’t want the truth. All my life I have been controlled and for the most part they still try to control me from another country and 6 hours ahead of me. 

“Well why didn’t you tell us?” Please God tell me you are joking? Oh you’re not joking!? Anything that’s different is not a good thing to my parents. Different is different for a reason and it’s not a good one. They’re the reason for my the majority of my issues and why can’t they accept I’m not okay?! 

I have never been accepted for who I am but I’m not about to fake who I am. I believe my parents should accept me for who I am and the issues I have. Don’t you think if I had the choice to be “normal” I would be? No medication, no mental health issues, no physical disability?! But that’s not who I am!! I am **proud** to be different. I am proud to have tattoos (which my parents HATE). I am proud of who I was yesterday, who I am today, and who the fuck I will be tomorrow. 

If you got this far, thank you for reading! Take care of yourselves my loves!",2.6141217391304323,4.499006598095238,4.0999440993788845,85.9959037267081,76.35238095238095,6.9271221532091065,24.936853002070393,7.818819491935897,1.3387846790890268,2044,71,416,31,46,678,215,525,0.096,0.7829999999999999,0.121,0.9609,12,0,0,0,0,0,57.0,1,10,13,7,15,31,5,0,22,1,54,17,1,4,5,67,91,34,0,11,15,8,2,3,0,5,14,1,0,1,33,18,0,4,17,5,0,6,25,9,1,2,12,6,75,22,57,70,7,36,0,1,2,2,52,14,1,6,19,296,108,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048661894408859284,0.0,0.0,0.03976991704790464,0.061323709923614016,0.0,0.0,0.05799865052581305,0.0,0.0,0.04812588648075868,0.0,0.10934596787973977,0.0,0.05494597358000225,0.0,0.0,0.035650220298872874,0.0,0.04976406431248459,0.19766831566193144,0.0,0.051722773693173685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059626523934908436,0.0,0.06186643741666682,0.050377256702813455,0.0,0.06319850682025252,0.1311855717689463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3055073783883973,0.06702569416461719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05914073823694312,0.04177971176186045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05406587274868648,0.061109095454853775,0.0,0.09971038508010226,0.09810422788290672,0.09354715229412583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057739087552602965,0.0,0.3108193412271056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057593209260523436,0.0,0.0,0.132038622463226,0.0,0.2441609864113829,0.0,0.05198168685513415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261544719091772,0.08571438024877198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052782489512168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17674406094523662,0.29468162784743435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04667995240694403,0.06215734775325516,0.08598232584035526,0.0,0.04510509565488946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0573001615408338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07925813560754066,0.04447836586452003,0.0,0.0,0.4545631137822535,0.063330548405464,0.0,0.04054420979598563,0.0,0.0,0.12839183783762284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05949744548035616,0.0,0.05595958916786718,0.06836258903821846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699609814320433,0.0,0.07493041909128448,0.12025893078926395,0.05774413981667095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04650741099559423,0.0,0.0,0.0466027599734243,0.05324001933637176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13093212116820616,0.04139401841142941,0.0,0.046703978793644116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13191406037126624,0.0,0.1022320811358809,0.05384257355929978,0.06687951872132207,0.0,0.0777059805985602,0.0749460941173284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05543430921118957,0.0,0.0,0.07941118102027964,0.0636118649781717,0.0,0.0,0.07034691348447941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034494330318950384,0.0,0.046910911658393964,0.0,0.10516508373207104,0.0,0.1583133296575561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041544093247805315,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jadacee,2020/04/14,Virtual Psychiatrists/Therapists and Insurance For those who get like counseling or consultations form virtual therapists/psychiatrists I have questions regarding my insurance like i dont wanna sign up for a 80-200 dollar session if my insurance isnt covered for the most part so when will they let me know if its covered? Like say I make an appointment. Am I automatically gonna be charged? or will they determine if my insurance covers it and we go from there? I have UMR insurance btw.,6.211282467532468,8.505441329545459,7.415129870129872,64.29090909090911,67.52272727272727,12.755844155844155,37.57142857142857,12.031772070788634,5.82932922077922,399,22,64,17,7,135,62,88,0.022000000000000002,0.88,0.098,0.7383,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,2,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,9,0,0,1,0,14,14,9,0,4,5,0,0,3,0,3,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,12,3,6,9,3,3,0,0,0,0,7,1,0,7,4,47,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3648432619469178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16264228439716336,0.0,0.1769199242419329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17108326745061433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3183270691162923,0.0,0.4562588434857969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077962952132928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371093938839073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34872913727189336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2475595984335717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3614452553891864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,90rpalevels,2020/04/14,"I want to kill myself 😭😭😭 I spend most of my time alone. I do not have any interests or hobbies. I feel like a simp for everyone, and no one offers to help me whenever I need it. I try my best not to think negatively but I can't do it. I do not love myself at all. Nobody loves me either. I do not have a core personality for myself. I always ""adapt to changes"" and mould myself to fit in with others. I do not enjoy what I am doing with my life right now. I just want to drop out of school and start working. Life is just dull and boring, I do not enjoy my life anymore. I have always wanted to kill myself, but Im afraid of dying. I just wish that I have more friends to talk to and support me whenever I need help. I wish to die now. Hope this isn't my last post on reddit 😭😭😭.",-0.4253114964675646,1.3433596127167642,2.4820327552986505,94.38608060372513,85.82080924855492,5.231727681438664,16.547527296082208,6.42735559955562,-0.4380222222222225,595,12,145,6,18,210,91,173,0.19899999999999998,0.601,0.19899999999999998,-0.2655,0,1,0,0,0,3,20.0,0,0,0,2,5,15,2,1,2,0,15,5,0,0,1,33,29,8,4,8,13,0,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,2,0,1,0,10,5,0,1,0,1,32,10,21,29,5,13,0,1,0,2,8,6,0,3,6,103,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1460623321851756,0.0,0.0,0.2346929556632941,0.0,0.0,0.0959037815095572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13986174276342378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480000393581722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1491887772769522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2927293085137182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13475816477099328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130792391844505,0.10075033205413364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1089577755490288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1890560049340563,0.0,0.0,0.14007248695865862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523342903477272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3120528662899627,0.0,0.0,0.1149565294266648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988364466728093,0.0688990892764798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545663012375913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091407439002513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955641284215467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12314008849894985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350657071057711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12043702270340605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14272772441762874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998202458594636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003674537055682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11335285260553275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09036495885275762,0.0,0.0,0.082234479846371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574866028525007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2495456589141722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243501603517266,0.0,0.0,0.102669962418315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheEnigmaticPhoenix,2020/04/14,"Problem: I feel like I'm the best and the worst at the same time. Sorry, I'm new to Reddit so sorry in advance if I say/do something wrong. In case it's important to know, I have been clinically diagnosed with Asperger's syndrome and ADHD. 

Every time I complete anything, whether it be a list of chores or a school assignment, part of my brain screams at me for not doing it well enough. That I should've done *this* instead of *that*, or I should have chosen choice 2 rather than choice 1. It's just a constant reminder of my inadequacy in everything I do. I never do anything right...

On the other hand, though, for every action I take a different part of me is cheering and exclaiming how I never screw up and am immune to failure and that I'm the apex human and I'm constantly improving even without trying. It makes it very clear that I'm better than anyone or anything else and no one will surpass me. I always do everything perfectly!

I need some sort of explanation as to why this is happening. Not necessarily a solution yet, but just some kind of clarification as to what this could mean.",2.515739167374683,4.979152341121496,4.249430756159729,81.92163126593034,79.32710280373831,7.255395072217502,26.08241291418861,8.296473431620573,2.009530841121495,867,35,163,18,22,291,129,214,0.09300000000000001,0.802,0.105,0.5232,1,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,4,10,12,1,0,10,0,15,6,2,2,4,38,27,18,0,6,12,0,2,1,0,2,3,1,1,1,15,8,0,0,4,0,0,2,6,5,1,1,2,3,17,7,27,21,8,18,0,0,0,1,1,8,1,7,9,121,32,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15489124262069426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724023450507113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09011736331026048,0.0,0.31817696873437296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13525381605658862,0.11398574690710846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14387505119296773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13513043326251675,0.2785515349990294,0.0,0.10290187228110492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081262193844814,0.0,0.13465436682808848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13189113862261595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10766445954642256,0.0,0.0,0.1331696651033067,0.0,0.08512541373695262,0.0,0.21717746139918875,0.0,0.2316618482236852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06516666392028245,0.0920734003746572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397001833979364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13421087771139364,0.07083023343493731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296528560316839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08602980476229984,0.0,0.0,0.14039039361550829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556444656398247,0.19880364684377688,0.12447513851652893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733384871510427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2791335168858636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332276698370714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006461204856564,0.0,0.10249222152114246,0.0,0.13043556926251235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0992197397574462,0.0,0.2885459259014895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969033021325424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662601215683025,0.0,0.15030438179455993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08750248812127033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10634123287746483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11588048901687953,0.0,0.1162960519313722,0.0,0.0,0.1242377484467233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409123477457036,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xochelyox,2020/04/14,"Where am I? This morning I'm feeling really weird. I woke up and I don't feel like myself. Like, I know my surroundings, where everything is, my family, and my pets in my home. But at the same time everything seems oddly unfamiliar. Just writing this on my phone feels weird. I have the muscle memory to know that I'm in the right place, but it sort've feels like I'm in somebody else's body. I have depression, anxiety, ptsd, and add, but I've never had this feeling before. I just feel really confused as to what I'm doing here.  I'm not sure if something like this has happened to anyone here, but I would really like some insight on what might be happening to me. Thank you.",2.6861111111111136,4.653075037037039,4.181203703703705,85.1229166666667,76.4074074074074,8.055555555555555,23.842592592592588,8.841846274778883,1.7674814814814814,530,17,107,12,12,176,81,135,0.183,0.76,0.057,-0.9475,0,0,1,0,0,0,21.0,0,1,0,0,6,11,0,1,3,0,11,1,1,0,2,30,29,9,0,2,8,0,6,5,0,2,0,0,2,0,8,4,0,0,10,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,6,16,7,12,24,2,14,0,1,0,0,3,12,0,5,7,68,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565805224674999,0.0,0.0,0.10571384139358936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12864945878820108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167935271194393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130217604373828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12629778748665585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2717552198653385,0.0,0.14252615485807274,0.0,0.4586697693384723,0.2160168137690452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673892799308221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15165342703051105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16617743325296214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3693129698346119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16038608514951858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11660514921277848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15795879789348002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17673014056692732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2905638233948004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12911333081384382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13763545578770714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639155259924973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249246471210927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919317169659015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881586688410274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10739928874410436,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drjlm3,2020/04/14,"""What do you se?"" Hi guys,

I came up with this idea last night and just created the subreddit:

[https://www.reddit.com/r/wdys/new/](https://www.reddit.com/r/wdys/new/)  


Wanted to field out your thoughts about whether or not you think it's a good idea - before I put more time into developing it.

I'll C&P the description to explain my thinking:

>This is a mental health subreddit designed to help people with anxiety and depression challenge damaging beliefs that they hold about themselves. How it works: users can post anonymously giving partial details about their life or post real details about themselves. The description should include or conclude with ""What do you see when you see me?"". Please try to be supportive and help challenge posters' unfounded self-judgments. Malicious or troll responses will be removed.

That's the idea basically.

E.g. I would probably post from a throwaway perhaps explaining who I am, where I live, what I do for a  living. I may or may not include the opinions I hold about myself (""I'm a total failure"" / ""at this age I should really own a car""). And the idea is that respondents would help the posters see themselves from a place of empathy and challenge the critical self-beliefs that are a big part of perpetuating depression (and which certainly cause suffering).

What do you guys think? Can it work?",8.798864306784658,10.567994845132745,6.993964601769915,71.75472271386433,60.725663716814154,10.62843657817109,38.96047197640118,10.650279960617883,4.567421002949851,1089,54,166,26,15,320,133,226,0.078,0.804,0.11800000000000001,0.6322,0,0,0,0,0,0,64.0,0,6,2,6,9,10,0,0,16,0,19,2,0,3,2,48,33,14,0,5,9,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,16,12,0,2,12,0,0,4,2,4,0,0,2,3,20,6,21,22,4,19,1,4,3,0,19,7,0,8,5,114,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169150264170174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254703247466955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181921056202734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12341457800157862,0.0,0.11084816259195578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858768431286997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351231195092794,0.0,0.0905055975778276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21368583690930432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146979730581308,0.0,0.0,0.21697934830275584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4872464597000147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795697989719896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07621649523706467,0.0,0.0,0.1905641903410148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874286419285292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20843064992690566,0.0,0.10126153627863356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168506037315592,0.0,0.07480774305234293,0.0,0.1127377624478304,0.11844729078831315,0.0,0.0,0.31002949751406583,0.0,0.11633984442445484,0.0,0.0,0.10847433227150728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281951761211232,0.06912670843001831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579589523015283,0.0,0.2251369041132639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12244931945645646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074235080564178,0.0,0.0856645198248183,0.06292027540130407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07326041443575451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06364516689922459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15711225565895034,0.0,0.0,0.1533052373526395,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,confusedanonymous111,2020/04/14,"Could I have a phobia? I'm terrified of dead and decaying things. This will get a bit gross, apologies.
I don't know when it started but it seems like i've always been afraid of it: Dead things and rotten food. The sight of a dead animal on the side of the road is enough to make me feel physically ill, my body start to sweat and my heart to pound. I've had several traumatic events with dead animals when I was younger, like accidentally punting a dead bird, discovering HALF of a cat on my school's playground and stepping on more dead rats and mice than I can count. Around the time I started to notice that my fear was abnormal, I noticed my absolute hatred for rotting food. I know everyone finds mold and spoiled food gross, but seeing a rotting apple on the ground makes me feel ill, like I could throw up. I can't eat leftovers because I've convinced myself it's gone bad and there's maggots crawling in it. 

I don't know what to do about this. Today I was doing the dishes and I touched a teabag in the sink that had grown mold and I literally cried. I know my fear is irrational, but everyone just thinks I'm being dramatic.",3.9528552837064055,5.36292294247788,4.684086413326393,85.15828474752735,71.78761061946905,8.149505465903175,27.453409682457057,8.671277953709913,1.8918472670484128,899,32,184,16,17,289,126,226,0.33299999999999996,0.618,0.049,-0.9979,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,0,6,12,0,3,14,0,19,10,3,2,0,28,37,14,6,2,4,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,12,11,5,0,9,0,0,4,3,8,0,1,7,6,23,4,22,26,3,24,0,0,2,0,1,11,0,1,12,109,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10576139853264586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11315024415333765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10612722168716236,0.07748192302433836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13876555163342955,0.14118480948304002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20296572409234576,0.0,0.13961868449015655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005997016106535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13133326394193773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2429082190318509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28605653608797343,0.1285360395885758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11617150952398915,0.0,0.4610869853763285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06640702624591667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15061983242699487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27941395619079923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18629099502995752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696869185179012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28941937682645913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12863687110785618,0.1012860911015672,0.11571146112007233,0.0,0.14359227598468732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698963530660556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16888559893299526,0.08144364111485239,0.0,0.0,0.07411584699316243,0.0,0.12048051437551865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,chocomudpie69,2020/04/14,"I hate Covid-19!!! Just a rant :((( Hello everyone Im a 17yo M living in a conservative Asian country. Recently because of Covid-19, my country has implemented a ""circuit breaker"", which effectively prohibits citizen from going out except for essential services. If caught, I would have been fined 300 dollars. Because of this strict measure, I can no longer go out to meet my acquaintances for small talks and stuff. Already in school, I do not have any friends to talk to, except for a few acquaintances which I only confide to. My parents aren't attentive to me either and my sisters just mind their own businesses, with little to no interactions with me. As such, I got very upset and depressed due to the loneliness within me. Computer games no longer interests me, I also cannot go out to play sports. I can't study properly at home as my household has 10 members and they are noisy and disruptive when Im learning. The more I spend my time at home, the more dreadful I feel. I do not wish to talk to anyone anymore. I just can't wait to go back to school even though I have no friends.",4.781225609756098,6.614001278048782,5.236143292682929,80.34250762195124,70.36585365853661,8.442073170731707,32.8125,9.017664075816787,2.9774939024390243,862,41,156,17,16,275,121,205,0.18899999999999997,0.777,0.035,-0.9823,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,2,1,9,9,1,2,8,0,15,0,0,1,0,28,25,11,0,3,9,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,4,10,0,2,4,3,2,5,10,4,0,0,3,1,25,5,32,21,5,20,0,1,0,0,14,10,0,1,5,110,29,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16147612233578348,0.11701811223608115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09950777165656316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451176391934538,0.10231564567678206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251687615827873,0.0,0.17839986825888146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260317295668712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09664798602699316,0.0,0.0,0.1398222726760071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0739876207057914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22610464944928904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326453415660001,0.0,0.11703153238153485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14446819018812707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29355698555978177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31611779099400017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14665867601349653,0.1292099332973891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14774914170901352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112887177705824,0.0,0.0,0.16247946002306998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444808313897323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2961826444558901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16751006964107631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3528376961621906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1437661036386207,0.0,0.08532478817880049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12073557752087552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16826949461754484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10394691393502377,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,btwnope,2020/04/14,"Husband opens up about (what I think is) anxiety - how can I best support? My partner of 7 years finally opened up about how he feels a lot of the time.

 This weekend our neighbours that live above us have been really loud and annoying. They've been this way since they've moved in - starting to drill holes in the middle of the night and later really loud and frequent parties. In the beginnig they were reasonable and quieted down after we confronted them but eventually they'd just ignore us when we'd go up an ring or knock on the door. We complaind to our landloard and for a few month we didn’t have any bigger problems with them. My husband started to sleep with earplugs because any noise now will stress him out intensely. Saturday night I couldn’t sleep because of the noise, I knocked and ringed but they just ignored me – I probably should’ve called the police but that seems like the last measure I told him about it and that is when he started to be kinda depressed.

For the last three days he’s been very sad, not eating and having troubles with his digestion even. He told me how much our living situation stresses him. He can’t ever relax and he feels out of control, even like a prisoner in our flat because we really can’t do anything against the noise but he told me even more: That he constantly worries about everything and that every little mistake he makes everyday stresses him out the same and sometimes he even has some OCD-ey thoughts such as: “If I don’t do this (for example walking on a specific side of the road) and that something terrible is going to happen to people that I love…”. For me that really explains a lot about why we sometimes fight a lot about silly things and why I’ve felt distant at times. He told me he was scared to tell me because he thought I would judge him or not love him and such. 

I want to know how I could support him – and what he could do to feel better, gain control of his feelings an thoughts. I allready proposed seeing a doctor about that but with the Covid19 situation that won’t be happening soon – he didn’t oppose but he wants to first try it himself.

It would be great if you had some tips or could refer some books or things of that kind.",6.415279069767443,6.504349969767443,6.1561395348837245,81.56118604651166,65.5813953488372,9.298604651162787,33.246511627906976,8.954980946260402,2.6588865116279066,1757,69,341,26,25,548,215,430,0.14,0.772,0.08800000000000001,-0.9784,0,0,1,0,1,0,29.0,12,1,5,6,24,26,3,4,22,0,35,6,2,8,1,88,65,34,0,12,16,2,5,2,2,4,2,5,1,1,21,29,2,5,14,3,0,4,9,15,0,2,16,11,48,11,50,36,11,52,0,2,1,1,57,21,0,14,28,233,69,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658036890676166,0.0,0.05994821990166604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06448686740917456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19107978658765573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223814819771894,0.06930656021307749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001837144093353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468360850672048,0.175783703767059,0.1877017522138301,0.0,0.0,0.050538275520815225,0.0,0.06749476954199485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08020884030612377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018590134297153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20703464329206647,0.0708846941455651,0.06602502160929173,0.0,0.07042848017687718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584927041994855,0.0,0.07524169697706587,0.08584389493007717,0.0,0.06665634989574841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08907209615140059,0.0,0.0,0.0863965497452944,0.0,0.0,0.13859399359798133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160401216596849,0.04306678660855167,0.1277541836378367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765693514566507,0.07854128141289124,0.13839363627580034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19986672605827904,0.14145307864856466,0.0,0.05230855616304955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06254937044612592,0.0832884947412387,0.05760653207101218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1470785481301182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054327707446361916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448960995688116,0.0749837326816394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20080785432536186,0.08057120909011159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07845600119817517,0.0,0.062445935505195165,0.07133961198157178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648234829021497,0.1761687633960263,0.15684112009318932,0.0,0.0,0.060328409949616975,0.15500793331358675,0.0,0.16639925653513055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26929697667795643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17785300111999916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684935607763749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10412307459027703,0.05021246555231748,0.0,0.1866367082476781,0.09138931813662064,0.0,0.0,0.2995205129228267,0.0,0.05320398932607882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18852440606292112,0.0,0.0,0.06465847932339416,0.09244219559615917,0.062201669086856565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14142258211096015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958241188578391,0.0,0.11133502689770594,0.0,0.0,0.05046382517992367
mentalhealth,Cyberred191,2020/04/14,"Hey guys I’m beginning to feel like I’m not wanted on this planet and I know it’s a horrible feeling to have and to witness because it makes you feel very lonely. So I’m 19 and every since 16 I’ve been trying to hide my feelings with eating food none stop. So the last 3 years I’ve obviously gained weight. But I seriously hate it I wanna lose all this weight because it’s linked with me being unattractive and having no friends. Man it sucks because growing up I was placed in foster care and I know I have some learning disability’s and stuff but I don’t want Them to take over my whole life. Day to day it’s a real hell for me its not as easy as getting up and carrying on it feels like everything is more intense. So about my looks and stuff I’m seriously beginning to think is it the reason I have no friends ? Does no one actually wanna be around me? Are they embarrassed? It feels like I’m the one who’s trying to make the friendship here not the over way around. I have never been asked if I wanted to meet up with anyone or if I want to go their house or anything. Day to day I get no messages from anyone and I’m too depressed to find work. When is this gonna end ?

When am I gonna actually wake up one day and think damm life is super good ? When am I ? Because I swear down it’s not happening any time soon. I actually feel like I’m sinking into the walls of invisibility. But I’ve actually figured what i do wrong. I speak over people. I’m loud and obnoxious and rude. I try to but I’m the covo even tho I’ve got nothing to do with it I feel like i have to be the important one here. I sit in my room and I try to imagine a world where at least one person likes me I just want that. I just want a world where I’m not horrible and clingy to girls who I’ve legit matched on some shitty app because I’m only like that because you don’t understand how a single message makes me feel it makes me feel wanted and important and it hurts when they message back go away you creep. Please stop messaging me. Actually I’m in tears typing this because it’s got to me I’m seeing the monster I’ve become since I was born and I’m sick.... please I want help",0.8563774162147126,2.8955470588235315,2.9751504195058662,91.12647476011685,82.7690631808279,5.910740277198348,21.0949334816669,7.125416948008024,0.4967787604876471,1696,52,379,23,47,574,203,459,0.15,0.696,0.153,-0.7469,0,2,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,3,4,4,22,24,4,1,14,0,24,8,1,6,3,83,83,36,0,12,15,0,12,7,2,2,3,2,1,4,26,24,4,2,21,0,0,3,13,12,0,5,6,16,46,12,49,72,8,52,1,4,2,0,24,26,2,6,28,226,72,3,0.0,0.0,0.3246078752567681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04524121251429626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09303562510829133,0.0,0.05474674375338219,0.11844776458327858,0.0621945497707464,0.0,0.06250509561142675,0.051155802416018616,0.0,0.2838832762829296,0.07347477241645231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06782956669430854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21452476533867615,0.0,0.057300331079246564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05821896107819001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807458897953993,0.0,0.0,0.0589239197015615,0.0,0.0,0.04394101085910049,0.0,0.05605257449427849,0.0,0.0597909328223175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3363847482516789,0.2376375108260327,0.0,0.0,0.0608052404762561,0.0,0.08044572816277917,0.0,0.10279848825788736,0.0,0.06951610109468702,0.0,0.07561860917566576,0.055800395772203096,0.10641678211065732,0.0,0.0,0.06587302105927839,0.058830349171117374,0.0,0.0,0.06568246866601139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044592208783097526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0767641951229674,0.07121942864602382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312392198491348,0.054229068925498176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09398116166110672,0.22751499509762765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05586663010750285,0.07442763576048718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776313991000563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05131037149367223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06383525671395589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254049305778337,0.05059742015407074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04612202759676213,0.05808954376063957,0.06950743303641475,0.14605518069641027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572324668000316,0.0,0.0684016996820187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0530140750651003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11006503340060964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112405062635268,0.0,0.0,0.15231692023155982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05002065616322926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08525670714862975,0.0,0.0,0.03879291848738553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806721453415256,0.0,0.0,0.06925782763577835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054892435331687514,0.31391874951475435,0.05280670274962577,0.0,0.16202597275036548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07427595747685113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04843305983861456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727377492884649,0.0,0.042841747737737114
mentalhealth,FormalBeyond,2020/04/14,"Quick Question(s): Is there any correlation between schizophrenia & drug use?  Friends & I suffer from schizophrenia or psychosis & most have a reoccurring history with drugs. The ones still using almost exclusively use THC. There symptoms seem to be exacerbated while ""high"" but they all say it is a releving sensation. While the majority and myself included had minor symptoms prior to engaging drug use become more symptomatic after heavy use of drugs. Even after abstinence from substances for multiple years the symptoms don't fade. Anecdotal words for this experiences effect are ""hatching schizophrenia"", ""perma-fried"", ""pandoras box/key"" and ""shattering/breaking from the fall"". Just as common is that most attempt to abstain from drugs but frequently relapse, in the name of self-medicating, finding at least temporary solace from painful symptoms with drug use. All while knowing that it may very well be a huge factor to inducing symptoms. More anecdotal terms for this experienced effect ""putting out the fire with gas"", ""growing/maturing schizophrenia"", ""boxing the clown"" (those clowns that pop back harder the stronger you punch) and ""overwhelming the symptoms"".

Is there any any studies or information on this subject? What drives the urge to relapse? Why can some people do the same/more amount of drugs and never experience these situations? How can low-dopamine/damaged reward system trigger hallucinations/psychosis? Any studies/research on recovery/reversal of this chemical response? How?",9.527466294746633,12.329593882845195,7.757370990237103,63.095294049279396,59.96234309623432,10.499395629939565,41.72966062296607,10.62613485830676,5.424374988377499,1234,68,155,31,18,368,157,239,0.038,0.8759999999999999,0.086,0.9152,0,0,7,0,0,0,62.0,0,1,1,4,11,7,0,1,14,0,14,14,0,12,3,40,22,14,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,1,14,1,0,0,12,8,0,1,7,0,0,3,2,3,1,1,1,3,4,4,29,18,11,26,0,2,0,0,6,7,0,8,15,105,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07615992909912142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24722263136690945,0.0,0.2068850106525064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05848300774670422,0.0,0.0,0.08399879351854651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6174124364313802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05023481906455437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14879634827268598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06951456495381983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058761318376397524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08035821695843821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04179884484202687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448199261174967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058659716236042415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05153807653694797,0.0,0.08092982978074044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05272822964048576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645812142879847,0.08520105629224944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060483444104587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06923928175583939,0.07934386131878099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549106384617122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060739082876378414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4743130095580274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39413208920608733,0.0,0.06275485026373656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06838422444398701,0.0,0.06862945940852985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048978105053511314
mentalhealth,LifeAfterAna,2020/04/14,"How to reintegrate society after the quarantine? Personally for me, the quarantine made every mental issue that I had so much worse. I found myself falling back into my ED behaviors, and my anxiety is through the roof. I ended up isolating myself from my friends, I dont text or call them as much and I'm pretty sure it will be difficult to be social again.
Do you guys know how to fix this issue? Thank you very much!",3.6027513227513204,5.669809839506176,5.238906525573197,78.11222222222223,74.06172839506173,9.073015873015876,26.386243386243386,9.606745405546679,2.7090021164021154,331,12,60,9,7,112,61,81,0.10400000000000001,0.762,0.134,0.5535,0,2,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,2,1,0,5,4,0,0,3,0,7,0,0,3,1,10,12,7,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,3,0,13,3,10,6,3,7,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,1,4,47,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121810340734232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15199712865126053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2018446316986625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23166944455802885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17507821557912415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16654670583318545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167365208540456,0.1527204569857012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19572579421526332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.412635233926125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10863504873833496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870414871893712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19920630929248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4359337377127327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17259906871315467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011029091472336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015011302115404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18630298405538206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819892953609928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309963212460282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014440753892302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jlsf_,2020/04/14,"Emotional Attachment Anything I get into I get so emotionally attached to the point I get overwhelmed with all the emotions I’m feeling. For example, a new show that I get so attached to that after finishing it I become depressed for days. I dont know if its a good thing or a bad thing, honestly. It also translates to people I meet for a short period of time and I know I’ll never be able to meet them again.",2.9413425129087765,4.727396180722895,4.957177280550777,80.64096385542172,75.144578313253,8.11635111876076,28.72461273666093,8.841846274778883,2.484502237521516,325,14,62,7,7,112,55,83,0.086,0.758,0.157,0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,4,5,0,1,6,0,2,0,0,0,2,10,10,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,9,2,11,9,1,11,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,2,8,44,16,0,0.18350967903475787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675262402387496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15101282980760858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15322291678960873,0.0,0.20267202287063896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11834856160045235,0.0,0.15805661765327014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2150719771199624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6192710675597061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09278800756888446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835049328518991,0.0,0.0,0.15391921221660462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20170424080958024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14153397748446728,0.1772347915329585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12722250541926294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734759622580282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438313531711325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700596959091413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dragozan,2020/04/14,"Lack of Concentration, Headaches, Feeling Neutral about Hobbies etc... Hello everyone.

So over the last 5 years or so, a lot has changed with my life. Main points being:

\-Me and my then girlfriend/now wife moved out of our parent's houses and began living together, paying bills etc.

\-We got married.

\-We have moved on three occasions.

\-We adopted a cat.

\-Moving in and out of a couple of jobs (worked in mail order for 5 years, just started a new job in the last month in a factory).

\-Have had two children: one two years ago and one last week.

Now I'm sure that a lot of the above has played into what I'm about to describe, but I just wanted some opinions/advice from whoever I willing to listen (thank you so much in advance to anyone who does, by the way. It means a lot).

Over the course of the last 5 years, I have noticed a variety of issues cropping up mentally. I have tried to list the main issues below:

\-My energy levels and concentration have dipped. I will find myself reading stuff, but not actually taking in what I'm reading. Reading longer passages reduces down to just ""Glazing over"" the words and skimming whatever I pick up.

\-I can get a lot more irritable. I feel like every little thing has been sent to distract or annoy me. Every little sound feels like its layering and latering in my head. I've described it to my wife as ""feeling cursed"". An example from today: My wife had a routine hospital appointment for the new baby today. We don't drive, so her mother took her and the baby to the hospital. My eldest wanted to see her grandmother, so they decided to take her for the trip (staying in the car with the grandmother, due to the COVID19 stuff going on). I took the opportunity to try and relax for a bit, but then (as if responding to that thought) the phone went off and I had to talk to a family member for the next 10 minutes. This act isn't a problem at all, but i felt like this new distraction was sent just to disturb that now rare chance for relaxation and quiet.

\-I love video games. I love palying them and I love researching their history and watching stuff on youtube about them. However, my enjoyment of playing games seems to have been (for lack of a better term) ""rounded off"". I still enjoy them, but I don't feel fulfilled or buzzed by them, like I used to. To reiterate, I'm not bored of them or feel like I'm out of love with games. I still actively enjoy sitting down and playing through the next chapter of Dragon Quest 11. I just don't feel as fulfilled. It almost feels like guilt; like I should be doing something else like housework.

\-In extension to the above point, I feel like the only tasks worth doing on a day out are housework, or anything that isn't self-indulgent. 

\-I find myself pacing around the living room, not being able to sit down for longer than 5 minutes. I feel the act of sitting down to be pointless, in case I need to be up do sort something out (change nappies, wash dishes, vacuum the floor).

\-I can get anxious about anthing that threatens change, especially financially. For example, in the UK we have a benefits system that needs to be updated ifmy circumstances change (new job, address, etc.). Just filling this out makes me anxious. ""What if filling this out negatively affects the household income? What if i do something wrong and it all screws up?"" some thoughts I can have doing this sort of stuff. These thoughts also bleed into my full-time job. ""What if I do something stupid and lose my job?"" and more recently ""What if our factory closes because of COVID and I have to live off sick pay?"". You get the idea.

A few extra points that I feel to be relevant:

\-My diet could be better, I'm not gonna lie. I could do with drinking more water (normally gravitate to coffee or tea), and I could go for less carbs, more veg etc.

\-My eyes are constantly feeling tired, despite recently having eye exams and starting to wear glasses. Glasses have screen protection too, to help with computer work/gaming.

\-My wife has had an extensive history with mental health, including PTSD and Depression. She's doing considerably better these days, but it's kinda fallen on me to deal with the financial side of things, as well as a lot of the household responsbilities because of her condition.

\-To be absolutely clear, I love my family and my children immensely. Although I do think a lot of my stresses are caused by being a parent and husband, they instill more purpose into my life than anything.

I do feel like persuing the mental health services might help me out, but I don't really want to go down that route just yet (mainly due to the existing stress in the health sector at the moment, as well as not wanting to take too much time off from my new job during the proabtionary period). And I know that I shouldn't take the advice of strangers over that of a professional therapist. I was just wondering if anyone else has been through a similar state of mind, and has any advice that could help?

​

Once again, many thanks in advance for any help you can offer.",5.2951478287650176,6.6893213455497404,5.65348860486603,79.54399022174317,68.52879581151832,8.67523868186018,30.27448413920543,9.048148649214221,2.5817523868186014,3995,155,723,73,68,1276,415,955,0.076,0.768,0.156,0.998,10,0,5,0,0,0,180.0,7,3,8,8,29,47,3,6,59,0,68,24,4,5,4,149,133,60,0,22,32,8,15,10,0,6,9,3,3,2,37,50,5,1,27,13,4,21,13,14,2,5,20,23,88,33,145,93,31,133,0,2,6,6,57,60,1,27,54,508,125,18,0.04334472524093428,0.0,0.04229819928336656,0.0,0.0,0.1270678915573287,0.038422483655019886,0.0,0.04340348119620679,0.0,0.0,0.03466276111515724,0.0,0.04696399168931737,0.052668585484333535,0.058951799035594735,0.0,0.0,0.0979344038734613,0.0,0.06061527940704262,0.044411793251985895,0.07133803132669624,0.03858599507983088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05284508439135816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11500466131161464,0.04732121377768665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044526972676516265,0.1834118879977749,0.0,0.0,0.04684024948970174,0.0,0.13842894444997186,0.0479601140492436,0.0,0.0559075239215015,0.044686508462904784,0.03733274833636863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037931261153290485,0.0,0.0,0.04246132922687343,0.0,0.0,0.07241791213027644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1933633052172368,0.0,0.0,0.0730396009163153,0.041417742465105434,0.0,0.0,0.08172309875078859,0.0,0.28491314078615104,0.1857928822368544,0.04161773359191009,0.0,0.0792325872286144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06793748985248363,0.0,0.07390141870202434,0.0,0.034666736391181625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044484193050733326,0.13822024812114878,0.0,0.0,0.11621222264561312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05001399335382898,0.0,0.04893091885892541,0.0,0.09048126367675433,0.2580777096048225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.023821127429923074,0.14132694485909988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0612313225869725,0.21176043326079744,0.08688560351862529,0.11482255949977176,0.0,0.0,0.04849166039327732,0.0,0.22110081226679687,0.1956015341050138,0.0,0.02893294067563115,0.04394474817066808,0.0,0.047215112729001855,0.0,0.0,0.13104386476405147,0.04598190377049975,0.04376581630112752,0.0,0.03459734615451353,0.13820574992355444,0.06372672072018704,0.06427912909426697,0.0,0.20931302867886595,0.09219521405784058,0.0,0.04246862777955333,0.0,0.04934825697370823,0.0,0.046160717762795976,0.05874301518712659,0.032965616733854765,0.0,0.0,0.09625837575531933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12292432681804302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04147504822256552,0.05066766427598497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300693648174888,0.0,0.027767740894464786,0.0,0.08559537405761382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034540134156529706,0.03945940994531606,0.04521800155961381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347554848859844,0.0,0.0,0.061359239239219515,0.046199709907631566,0.06923030713614851,0.0,0.0993024726339008,0.0,0.19847736106485087,0.0,0.0,0.04085189057582785,0.0,0.13035935625427586,0.03483884827965223,0.0,0.07981199890871543,0.0,0.05032656679913078,0.05759261889573768,0.02777354975109444,0.0,0.1032326105655281,0.0252746578570357,0.0498183853977872,0.08217146272542313,0.0,0.0963151692039033,0.05885644643220862,0.0,0.08468299665096703,0.0,0.0,0.03743592578807397,0.0,0.0,0.1022633678808402,0.034405025365363495,0.0347685240747552,0.0,0.07794422696766963,0.04018099455056588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04700550556160482,0.06311095241717249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04739065268199917,0.052668585484333535,0.11165032777008936
mentalhealth,my_name_throwaway,2020/04/14,"I don't have personality I feel like all of my hobbies, interests and personality traits are fake and aren't my. I don't have any real friends and I feel like everything I do is just to impress others and make them want to be my friends. How do I know who I really am. And yes I get it that take some personality traits from people I like but lately I've been feeling like none of them fit me and I'm just forcing them on to me.

I hope it made sense.",1.0994043528064132,2.85179273195876,3.5762199312714777,88.61926689576175,80.44329896907217,6.785337915234822,22.117983963344788,7.793537801064563,0.7967351660939292,353,11,83,6,9,123,56,97,0.048,0.6970000000000001,0.254,0.9333,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,3,0,3,10,0,0,0,1,12,0,0,3,1,21,23,8,0,2,3,0,3,4,2,0,0,0,0,3,5,6,0,0,4,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,2,3,18,9,7,20,3,3,0,0,0,0,9,2,0,2,5,55,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736574591473035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683269818519023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28410309092760394,0.4014067325995709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894044038217383,0.0,0.09785292631370958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18602433087420048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293140203609692,0.0,0.2112748001935496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36600783662195613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17722128115108826,0.12501961368247247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984546879916364,0.4906113912341934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213180577188024,0.119984770244418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1408211192695318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047033629992672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rrayaa,2020/04/14,"empathy hi i was wondering if there is anyone here that feels like they don’t experience empathy or just not a lot that’s willing to chat about it, i’m doing research about it for a school project and i’m also just genuinely interested. pretty lowkey you don’t have to share anything you don’t want to! <3 this is not an actual project as in i’m gonna use your words in my school project it’s just so that i as a person can understand things better!!!",2.633617021276596,4.387362734042554,4.181861702127662,86.00875,75.91489361702128,8.104255319148937,25.57978723404256,8.841846274778883,1.851514893617022,363,13,77,8,8,121,63,94,0.0,0.823,0.177,0.9321,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,1,1,9,4,0,0,4,0,10,0,0,1,0,15,19,7,0,2,7,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,8,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,1,7,4,10,16,1,2,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,4,1,52,15,6,0.0,0.0,0.24462296142829945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20046497058814253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752780190123311,0.0,0.20628443741414396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217019581979286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452085732632416,0.0,0.0,0.1267489786431529,0.17908250561922134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12246730398749285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131152010694672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21888002888879649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25502692970447466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5073936331307604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653755040852264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2609618587496296,0.0,0.21650299977876106,0.0,0.0,0.14785480422614652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27184670195726085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hellishdoinks,2020/04/14,"I constantly feel like I’m on the brink of tears. The past few days my mind has been rather intrusive, I can’t distract myself from my depression any longer. Without warning it pops into my head and reminds me how much I hate my life, how much I wish I’d just drop dead than go on. And I feel like I’m about to cry, but I don’t. I’ve always had trouble crying, it’s not that I’m not physically capable, it just doesn’t happen a lot. But as of recently this weird feeling hits where it’s like I’m trying to cry but can’t, I feel like I’m a defective person. Anybody else experience this?",1.529891774891773,3.1289676746031745,3.6740981240981263,89.1229220779221,78.60317460317461,7.121500721500722,23.359307359307362,8.00094639256281,1.1137714285714284,461,15,104,8,11,158,79,126,0.26,0.627,0.113,-0.9621,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,0,7,10,1,1,4,0,7,2,1,2,0,21,21,8,1,2,9,0,4,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,7,6,0,0,2,4,13,4,12,18,4,11,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,1,8,60,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932886929243326,0.0,0.0,0.10569663318991084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679628696606058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5121923550860179,0.10023845150033757,0.0,0.133870242178627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12984047340423632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203878709021185,0.0,0.0,0.3143570507567885,0.3331142127016003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833353431725433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744480952646926,0.0,0.0,0.1534533539613999,0.15951436639935634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097836664713254,0.3037378360580822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213965665998045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569383634600941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285154968821401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14837398270947208,0.0,0.13571407258586166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534667813794488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552567234887324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17873497470153876,0.14982741882472006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WyattSchrute,2020/04/14,"Traumatic Childhood but reformed parents Hey, 

I'm 26M

I've had a lot of childhood trauma,albeit not like the one you usually see in the movies, but it was trauma enough to leave a lot of scars that I continue to deal with.

My parents did not invest enough in my early childhood education, didnot encourage me to take up sports, I was beaten occasionally, verbally abused and also bullied by classmates and cousins alike.

Now, I see that one of my parent seems to have changed from the time when I was young.

But I still feel that the experiences I had when I was young still dictate my life pretty significantly.

I feel that I'm ugly, with no personality, no communication skills and I have never felt loved in my life, despite having never lived physically alone.

Sometimes I also feel suicidal and think that maybe I should just end it all at once, but I beleive that I still deserve to give myself a second chance at life.

How do I start afresh and let go of all my insecurities and scars.

Also, I dont think I can afford therapy at this point in time, so please give me that ""Go get a therapist""-Bull crap.

Regards,
Wyatt",6.424067978533095,6.859438576744188,6.9409302325581415,74.75636851520572,65.55813953488372,9.592128801431127,31.422182468694096,9.466822959209583,2.735905187835421,894,32,166,16,13,293,123,215,0.214,0.713,0.073,-0.9879,4,1,0,0,1,0,25.0,0,1,0,2,12,7,2,1,8,0,15,5,1,1,4,30,34,17,1,1,7,4,4,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,10,8,0,0,7,1,1,2,7,4,0,3,8,6,26,3,21,24,6,31,0,0,2,1,12,9,1,3,21,117,36,1,0.0,0.13396556664071396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11710301600478673,0.0,0.2712582297050041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196095907262984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11656681683141835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13251334609463813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001435481443343,0.23365627927743698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060094156222464,0.0,0.0,0.17150978279540222,0.0,0.1085617761471356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05907269112477013,0.21692778859699685,0.12851683776207107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197213240063181,0.0,0.11561837501397056,0.2395870904839031,0.055238684974781765,0.0,0.0998399794607306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1922505529543759,0.10204712331414696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359071086674255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17440803951961376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12041235973334907,0.15323386245598614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37664161425168907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872549300419102,0.0,0.12411329807895315,0.10688459060836338,0.0,0.0,0.1150294958029776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801990636569459,0.10293168944245842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11182587071732968,0.0,0.08002920173603048,0.0,0.2708856702629151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12367663305174967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08501209719354083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293016406998425,0.1312791689397315,0.0,0.1448971690988839,0.0,0.0,0.13186021975037682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452701092790547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dunfan,2020/04/14,"How ToI (M24) Help my Long Distance GF(F21) With Her Mental Health During Corona My girlfriend struggles with Depression, and Anxiety.  She has a therapist, but due to the circumstances, all of her suggested helping devices are not allowed (Seeing Friends, Doing outdoor Activities, Etc.) She has lost her motivation for her school work, and her personal hobbies, such as exercising, and knitting.  She is coping with food, and feel bad about herself afterwards, because she is gaining weight with this.

She has battled mental health for a few years now, but she was forced to move back into her house, where a lot these issues originated from.  She says before it was individual issues, but now it seems like all of them are coming at her all at once.  It seems her bedroom at her home is a trigger for a lot of these? She also can only have contact with her Mom and Dad, and her sister, brother in law, and her 2 nephews.   This is because she baby sits her nephews, because their parents are working in hospitals and she has to self quarantine.  I have thought about visiting, but I am hesitant to because I live with my parents who are 60 and 57.  

I dont have a lot of experience with this, but I love her, and I feel so useless not being able to help her. 

​

Can someone help me to understand what this feels like, and what I can do to help?",6.285821713147413,7.120971812749004,6.465176792828686,76.65162973107572,65.93227091633466,9.143525896414344,34.81100597609561,9.188382445141503,3.1666750996015938,1059,48,188,18,16,339,138,251,0.109,0.767,0.12300000000000001,0.7231,3,1,0,0,0,0,43.0,0,0,2,5,10,10,1,1,7,0,25,6,0,5,3,46,36,20,0,0,7,8,4,2,2,0,3,1,2,2,12,20,2,0,8,1,0,3,3,6,0,0,4,6,39,4,31,31,8,19,0,3,1,1,51,7,0,5,10,148,51,4,0.10704553765722503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08560427778999534,0.0,0.1159837953284501,0.1300720449714974,0.0,0.0,0.08188954331125609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231141093169937,0.08937855264868788,0.2610158647803409,0.0,0.09108786826990754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09221025223203046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09219816472880507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254565729007034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938407069777444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471107625701348,0.0,0.0,0.16237632059406445,0.07647335349103135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943988904048254,0.0,0.08270311685603489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22756880170923885,0.0,0.0,0.3587518373427305,0.0,0.10737540222984708,0.0,0.0,0.12351617824743892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234554600206884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459408524071838,0.0,0.09452317091649304,0.09473193230002014,0.0,0.0,0.1168528494815087,0.2730188643945629,0.09661277707247004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2157534491586535,0.0,0.0,0.12537043994749614,0.0,0.11377246578179785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11400000401653038,0.0,0.08141295504498706,0.0,0.0,0.2377228031661011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09346803454342276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512690803830432,0.0,0.1083357989976174,0.08530143428032745,0.1949004742678196,0.11167184154077632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09069933668106728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190723803734992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1242881197541324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498219979724954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143817986481766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13035262663075264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15586085264132032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300720449714974,0.06893381662544026
mentalhealth,loudestsigh,2020/04/14,"No idea what to do with my life I’m a high school senior. I’ve had an issue since 7th grade where I either switch schools or have my grades drop in the second semester. I work very hard in the fall, but in the spring it’s almost as if I used up all of my energy. I have such little stamina, and it happens even if I don’t work hard in the first semester of the year. Second semester is always a shitshow, and it makes me scared. I want to pursue science or nursing in college. I’ve done some college classes before, and I’ve done really well on them (first semester of course, the next semester was terrible and ended up with me switching schools again). I’m just so scared that if I enter nursing, I won’t be able to retake a class if I do badly on it because it’ll impact my admissions score. And then my dream will be gone forever. 

I have considered this to be a form of SAD, but it hasn’t responded to antidepressants. It clears up in the summer toward the end of the semester (I’m back to normal again as of rn). I’ve been on meds for 1.5 years now and all I’ve had happen is severe, severe weight gain (150 lbs). And this weight is making me feel even worse! I know I can lose it, but I’ve lost weight before, and it’s so unmotivating to lose 60 lbs then gain 150. 

I have no idea what to do. Therapy hasn’t helped, a relationship hasn’t helped, meds haven’t helped. I feel like I’m just so stuck because I KNOW I can do the actual work, but my stamina is so bad that I don’t know if I can keep up with the work.",3.8802484472049694,3.908756807453418,5.274093167701867,85.92579813664602,70.98757763975155,8.676024844720498,25.416770186335405,8.548686976883017,1.3853672049689445,1180,30,268,18,20,398,147,322,0.17800000000000002,0.7390000000000001,0.083,-0.9874,0,0,0,0,0,0,37.0,0,0,1,11,15,11,0,2,17,0,33,4,0,3,3,43,52,27,0,7,14,0,7,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,15,11,3,1,7,1,0,3,9,9,1,4,9,7,28,2,34,37,5,37,0,4,0,0,6,17,0,9,17,173,43,14,0.09455685159770087,0.0,0.09227384716953067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468502816618302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07867887532073672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270838223251007,0.1579020428835008,0.11528195817798492,0.0,0.16092183253688838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19352897724422824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16749860911016878,0.0,0.0,0.12490781738674984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956215705665918,0.06755143367474982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608600193292287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16723262317809787,0.0,0.16940873234619375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901383933591528,0.09990450524436924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134863519085408,0.0,0.098692786426703,0.0,0.08404647432493068,0.0,0.0,0.15589791828838045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06678830066177749,0.04619570143957491,0.09477080627712203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21156986046380574,0.10321997337780413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623486537490247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100626916174758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056228439824792,0.0,0.0926456382452008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0605755404000508,0.0,0.0,0.10151867170207793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18933580805086092,0.28708974589875336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136446555353128,0.0,0.07821840476516125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081340005133008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166676013030724,0.0,0.07801930536270732,0.055772080955872216,0.0,0.0,0.345434314445596,0.08501796540769342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2753540565191739,0.0,0.09636150999588808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12178302452152588
mentalhealth,darkbrother321,2020/04/14,"I'm having many evil thoughts. As a bit of a background: I have a loving family. Sure they have their flaws (my grandma and sister especially) however they are a loving family who only want the best for me. Despite this, I'm not able to talk to them about stuff like this.

Now into the meat and potatoes about this post. I'm having very dark thoughts about many different things. The most recent, which happened just a few minutes ago, is grabbing a kitchen knife and jabbing it into my grandfather's throat while he's sleeping, watching him struggle and bleed out. This thought scares me heavily, and thankfully I'm trying to keep myself calm and collected involving this.

Other thoughts include things like suicide, cutting, etc. This has been going on for a while but ever since the quarantine stuff has been going on, it's been stressing me out to no end and getting worse. At this point in time I'm also struggling with my online schooling, constantly getting distracted before I even get started on work (I'm VERY easily distracted. Keys jingling in my face easily distracted). I'm not sure what to do and it's very tough to even think of bringing it up with my grandparents.",6.236986301369864,7.598327036529684,6.0528584474885845,77.67079452054797,66.30593607305936,9.127671232876713,33.32146118721461,9.3871,3.180731872146118,947,41,161,18,15,296,131,219,0.147,0.74,0.113,-0.8464,3,1,0,0,0,1,27.0,0,0,4,2,9,19,2,7,11,0,12,7,3,0,3,29,37,13,1,1,4,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,19,14,1,1,5,0,0,3,3,10,0,0,7,2,16,9,27,30,5,26,0,0,1,2,12,12,0,1,12,109,35,2,0.11520561055140473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212282264504036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212988513531767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980314892850869,0.0,0.12090118065235847,0.0,0.12577468873060105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12449633746311176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036534276193996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10203797611170287,0.0,0.12848470899263928,0.1521844384784251,0.10421007038942363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2172111931821858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180570529730656,0.0,0.13094800678140062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10187594093823556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024000400361472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256728411050516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2079551228999675,0.0,0.0,0.23360081372708305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761905818797808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10890653971523334,0.0,0.11033512913611047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137516419110968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534091394321218,0.11659422841202735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09529927155005244,0.0,0.1152888106655525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815431241083076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196763764750666,0.2408758359362421,0.26376572276104343,0.12601623931600478,0.0,0.21715984908460245,0.0,0.0,0.0925979058502524,0.0,0.1060658478338115,0.0,0.0,0.15307497708791132,0.07381910344267029,0.0,0.3658415447449636,0.06717731797150259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07821704726951556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28517008203747324,0.06795125397766373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387105657362208,0.0,0.11740435944254199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,koromilk,2020/04/14,"i’m not sure what’s wrong with my mouth I don’t know what’s wrong and I would like some help. Growing up I would get in trouble (like any child would) but I would start clamming up and not be able to say a word to my mom even though my thoughts were racing in my mind knowing how to respond. Due to the lack of response, this would further increase punishments and make me endure more than I would need to if I could have just said anything. This kept going on as I grew older and recently I slipped up and my mom found out I wasn’t quite happy for the past couple of years. She tried questioning me and I couldn’t answer even though I knew what to say but it would make my mom even angrier and try other methods to make me say something. She isn’t a bad mom she really does love me but she gets frustrated easily when she doesn’t know how to help because I stop speaking for some reason. I’m not mute at all but I would start fidgeting and panicking if I was in trouble and was being questioned by my parents because I stop speaking to them. I start to try and let time pass until it was over and it would take great effort or pressure to finally spit something out. I don’t notice this happening with other adult figures or with close friends so I’m not sure what’s wrong with me. Please help me understand why i’m like this.",4.2991403081914035,4.873619043795621,4.6875425790754255,88.56765612327658,70.24087591240877,7.840713706407138,27.63098134630981,7.793537801064563,1.4179292781832924,1054,34,227,12,18,333,138,274,0.146,0.6829999999999999,0.171,0.858,1,0,3,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,10,18,2,1,4,0,24,3,2,6,3,71,50,27,0,15,13,5,0,3,1,9,0,6,0,2,13,18,0,3,12,0,0,5,10,9,0,0,10,6,36,9,34,26,6,32,0,0,0,1,27,13,0,8,17,149,49,0,0.08077308406511652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054928466991354175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664693658727983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06744215130039695,0.09847704467486768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06449073506032629,0.08937388118943881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07068507018559156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600495807077319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08848296543617751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08856351755098013,0.06240508438241081,0.0,0.084401205275843,0.0,0.045905205090658464,0.0,0.0,0.08905261033582744,0.0,0.0,0.07142737148157594,0.08598444995671169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242148687592795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331723238106439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259595100045901,0.0,0.11838494660443633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07290086196051979,0.0,0.16174998248022654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08155778908781526,0.3784018393213706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05989221836225201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919606915685317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968895100427672,0.0,0.07710704840512306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866459060158806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180968679883262,0.08591211745869465,0.0,0.0,0.051745305965137864,0.08304818315709392,0.07975367597683396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07683369979605968,0.1927019953283584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12436613265834505,0.0,0.0,0.1715148139142148,0.0,0.0,0.13505983011544634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15225535164237486,0.0,0.06073130688262576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871828997325824,0.06412480630665936,0.0470994348783049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16451886598717586,0.0,0.0,0.08408762912759266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288514491922654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5164099328417482,0.2649380623621194,0.0,0.05201521788834886
mentalhealth,flygirlbri,2020/04/14,"SEEKING HONEST FEEDBACK & CRITIQUE!! I'm Brianna! I just wanted to mention and share that I started a channel of a SHORT FILM SERIES pertaining to MY EXPERIENCE WITH NARCISSISTIC (EMOTIONAL & OTHERWISE) ABUSE! I started condensing the information into short films for informative entertainment! WATCH I really appreciate any HONEST opinions! I crucially need HONEST feedback and CRITIQUE!!! I am of course also looking for support while I am just starting my channel I 

more crucially am looking for responses as to whether or not I am on the right track. I want my audience to enjoy my content as I am seeking to get good and valuable information across!

Please let me know what you think. My 3 short films are listed below! & you can always go to my channel for more!! <3 <3 <3 <3

AFTER ALL SERIES- TAKING REVENGE ON A NARCISSIST! Preview Coping Skills For Codependents And Abused!  [https://youtu.be/JlPJPBdMiK8](https://youtu.be/JlPJPBdMiK8)

 AFTER ALL SERIES- 4 BEST TIPS ON HOW TO HEAL FROM NARCISSIST ABUSE! TAKING REVENGE ON THE NARCISSIST [https://youtu.be/3hBQD8sP2jQ](https://youtu.be/3hBQD8sP2jQ)

AFTER ALL SERIES- COVERT WORD SALAD NARCISSISTS PSYCHOLOGICALLY MANIPULATE& IDENTITY EXCHANGE TACTIC [https://youtu.be/uVJN6Ra98hw](https://youtu.be/uVJN6Ra98hw)",9.513977798334878,14.107136595744677,7.369102682701204,56.78847826086957,68.68085106382978,9.227012025901944,36.897317298797404,9.43228470229965,5.098752728954672,1072,54,115,28,23,315,113,188,0.099,0.708,0.193,0.9536,0,0,0,0,3,0,81.0,0,2,0,2,4,10,0,0,6,0,8,2,0,1,3,25,24,11,0,3,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,1,0,5,7,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,20,10,28,23,6,19,0,0,3,0,7,11,0,2,7,82,22,2,0.0,0.4803467422407315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806923517911356,0.11244504381671544,0.5856847521132333,0.0,0.09189798546405596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14181823960989104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15201125268883964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321901921027573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060365198986053,0.0,0.07680163130731196,0.11334674016400542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742679157584562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13818702614847778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2269625625052701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020258190221536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14834015410558854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657240290659952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540650000989612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28695259014673963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15335218557896632,0.0,0.0,0.20321283526777234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659051337077017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594149398111587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,garyberry88,2020/04/14,"Looking for online therapy alternative I’ve been suffering with depression and anxiety for a few years now but I kept playing it down and didn’t attend my meetings with my local mental health team. However, lockdown has intensified this and I have been feeling strong urges to self harm, commit suicide or smash up my flat (which I share with my girlfriend). I am very paranoid a lot at the moment and I sometimes think there is a conspiracy against me and that’s something very bad is on the verge of happening. I have absolutely no one to talk to as my girlfriend is very self involved and her looking at me blankly while I speak then cutting me short to talk about herself doesn’t help. I have been looking online and I am very worried that I am on the verge of cannabis induced psychosis. 

Is there any websites or apps where I can get a kind of therapy/counselling alternative because I don’t know how much longer I can go on like this? I can pay if needs be but I am on benefits so reasonably priced options please.",6.417738095238093,6.957107270408166,6.372857142857143,78.46380952380957,65.58163265306123,9.390476190476187,36.74149659863946,9.2995712137729,3.349096598639456,819,40,152,14,12,259,121,196,0.182,0.693,0.125,-0.9209999999999999,1,1,1,0,0,2,12.0,0,0,0,2,7,11,1,0,7,0,22,1,0,3,1,26,33,17,1,2,5,0,1,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,6,10,0,1,5,2,2,2,4,5,0,1,5,5,25,6,23,27,3,20,0,2,3,0,14,13,0,5,6,108,31,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327958052789224,0.0,0.11618325341422445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680851073633645,0.09258102785981373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080892020972806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07679209677334715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934793700240758,0.0,0.08631353805225114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13430174495837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614350421864035,0.0,0.0,0.10179799262619617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581534804644413,0.08346602101755866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419800269835561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3826079233300736,0.0,0.0,0.12911790942689338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15305334872436188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116449216490422,0.11261270390655435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291380529043476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1667121299134504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561518460258191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31687557019704965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11692008457883793,0.1502073458305236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16612559037360594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2441412608442925,0.0,0.0,0.17368124331577872,0.0,0.0,0.09731477630840857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5012480771526311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423549761123528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780192637491894
mentalhealth,SilentSimon99,2020/04/14,"How can I keep myself from drowning in self-pity when I‘m supposed to do work? I have huge problem regarding my discipline. I‘m supposed to be at home and write a thesis. But instead of actually doing what I’m supposed and expected to do, I’m drowning in self-pity and making up pseudo-reasons why it would be legitimate to do something else. I‘m telling myself filthy lies like ""I deserve a break"" (I don‘t) or ""I can reach all my goals, even if I make this day a lazy one"" (I already missed my change of reaching all my goals). So I spend the day doing things that are ""more important right now"" (they aren‘t) and afterwards I feel like the most lazy and spoiled person out there. And that‘s pretty much how the cycle goes. I wish I could turn my anger on myself into motivation, but I fail on that as well. Neither do I not have any goals, I'm actually setting myself very high goals. But as soon as the moment arrives at wich it is on me to just get my butt up and start working, all my morale is gone.

Can anyone give me tipps on how to get and maintain control over myself? I no longer want to watch myself decade into apathy and carelessness.",3.9320145757418032,5.33690590265487,4.631874023945862,85.53262103071317,71.83185840707966,7.264549713690788,26.568453930244665,7.724431198458867,1.421316293597085,898,30,179,11,17,288,136,226,0.109,0.809,0.08199999999999999,-0.8783,1,0,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,9,12,8,1,0,7,0,20,1,1,7,3,40,39,22,2,7,7,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,8,12,0,3,2,0,1,1,5,5,1,1,1,2,30,3,27,34,7,28,1,2,1,1,5,17,1,3,10,128,38,8,0.0,0.0,0.30801220246819144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17415438974269826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10732060565256846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11034893937393894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16694889066843616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17700458110288644,0.12600360295405574,0.0,0.0,0.20355712381799304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13183540310997302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423628449159188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797967448446458,0.11274411170814455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16490517511504493,0.15139193036910428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16674175641705646,0.15830277856362862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402745223082903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420230305152932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2106874271805498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11601325787891725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694051870976716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779924701406274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16055607750051665,0.0,0.1510090401830706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1622616068307102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13477439592132884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3292739759033602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149482236289345,0.0,0.0,0.11170330380516176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13793854349016452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048462445951166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17165899209504346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13021510870601802,0.09308423794171716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14189595198342994,0.0,0.14240480982361695,0.0,0.18148114237281715,0.0,0.0,0.2297845272756416,0.0,0.0,0.11210828635299236,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vast_Wait,2020/04/14,"My feelings are affecting my college work and it gets worse since we can't leave the house For the past weeks since covid-19 appeared and we have to stay as much as possible at home, I felt worse everyday. I can't do anything, I have no motivation to read the courses, I am so behind I don't even want to think about it. I just hate my life and I have no energy for simple tasks. I don't know what to do. I didn't think this would make such a big difference. Before I used to learn with friends from time to time and the fact that I had to get up and go out it helped me to keep going, I was in top 30 students in my year. Now I feel like I want to give up everything. The fact that I don't know what to do with my life and I can't find any motivation is making me lose a lot.  I am afraid I might not pass this semester and I mean it. I don't know what to do. I am lost. I keep talking to friends but I feel like I can't tell them how I really feel, or that they don't take it as serious as it is for me. I guess I wrote this hoping I could hear something from you guys that would help me.",0.9070987654320994,2.0652428683127577,2.7937674897119362,96.67312037037041,79.16460905349794,6.670699588477366,20.38045267489712,7.365786028017652,0.16631539094650186,839,20,218,11,20,281,123,243,0.075,0.815,0.11,0.8634,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,2,1,2,6,7,10,1,1,7,0,29,2,0,7,2,51,60,15,0,6,4,0,5,2,2,3,2,1,1,1,16,12,0,2,15,1,0,4,13,5,0,0,6,6,42,5,31,50,2,20,0,2,0,0,15,8,0,6,9,145,58,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08206690300504699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09930979873784816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269024786122273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635358838164987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608547490469446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970835606976681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845988451259657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24407882081784746,0.17242839851083236,0.11587224009618265,0.0,0.1102998238782082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18647496598946392,0.0,0.126101198636618,0.11576776696144897,0.13717105974193078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329432163931955,0.11949270431717365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191470450408958,0.0,0.0,0.13601573521944388,0.0,0.16177923930870994,0.0,0.12105241761184402,0.11986300247990113,0.0,0.13924913602672176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2145328112221337,0.0,0.0,0.19896860006752184,0.0,0.0,0.1277832630620514,0.0,0.0,0.17048046349125706,0.11791682846677876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350106512490292,0.1317370611966618,0.10259827639684893,0.0,0.0,0.16111039017785564,0.0,0.0,0.13145648275682906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280229780415195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08871407987083743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520322719847115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360491721095989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071319418043874,0.0,0.07731104176411598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996563734334209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09290577277162773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12862939465381348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073674442963583,0.09699844379125566,0.10548010794788007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15465442960630893,0.0,0.0,0.14073958242303686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10422923611538973,0.0,0.0,0.14236101408506718,0.0,0.09680264689288763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785686773441789,0.0,0.2459675530600511,0.1714559810066236,0.0,0.0,0.07771430871903663
mentalhealth,LordNoOne,2020/04/14,"Emergency: Fiance's whole family got amnesia from stress. They can barely take of themselves and are refusing any help. The few mental health workers I've spoken to who know about this condition say they will die soon if they don't get to the hospital. When my fiance is functional, she tells me she is having strokes.

The police are unaware of the existence of this condition and say they legally cannot help because the family is refusing help.  Due to their amnesia, the family thinks I'm a crazy person who is trying to hurt them.

Please help if you can.  Almost no mental health workers I've spoken to are aware of this extreme stress response, and the few who are say the whole family may die soon if we don't get them to the hospital as soon as possible.

I've had this condition before myself (hence my unfortunate username) and no one knew I had amnesia at the time.  It stressed my parents out so much that they started getting it as well.",5.810395948434621,6.829029408839784,6.330069060773482,76.54420119705344,67.06629834254144,10.232228360957643,31.105432780847146,10.317481424215053,3.2991985267034982,757,29,136,19,12,246,99,181,0.187,0.732,0.081,-0.9666,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,1,8,2,7,5,0,3,11,0,18,3,0,0,0,16,28,12,2,3,3,1,1,0,0,2,3,3,0,1,10,6,0,2,3,0,0,0,5,4,1,1,4,4,18,1,17,22,5,9,0,1,0,0,27,2,0,5,7,95,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11703057849143242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947707135584861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07124417934119187,0.0,0.09944959366036094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24258968493723604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4407066557487603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18318262774246846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09347333675678858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24845926564773724,0.0,0.0,0.31334776080541304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12511405636252873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422987849383989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355592820118504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591447950374573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.079195595148267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12977269436483824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204825551556854,0.0,0.12829052729777976,0.0,0.13175579147898087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788242795040505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272271101364594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4016299671484886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787331369368317,0.0,0.1021514125552017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488695617381085,0.0,0.0,0.06814909193137299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934851979699444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508210079807012,0.0,0.0,0.2609671688417389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flutier,2020/04/14,Losing my mind I'm not sure if this is staying at home or just everything going on but I feel like my mental health is slowly deteriorating and I'm overthinking every single tiny thing and ruminating. I don't know who I'm turning into it but I definitely am not a fan. I don't even know what I should be doing to fix this since it's not like I can go anywhere to take my mind off it. Hobbies at home just aren't cutting it at this point. Suggestions anyone?,1.2287500000000016,3.4116227083333364,3.7644166666666656,85.17225000000002,82.33333333333334,6.34,21.058333333333334,7.554174236665415,0.8368908333333334,364,11,76,6,10,127,63,96,0.062,0.812,0.126,0.7834,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,1,0,1,0,10,1,0,0,1,19,20,6,0,2,9,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,10,3,0,0,3,0,0,2,6,2,0,0,0,1,9,3,8,18,1,10,0,1,0,0,2,7,0,2,2,51,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14286080573438995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13494719272983585,0.0,0.1721430032080451,0.0,0.18362387157961527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330708503556237,0.14596166244836162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23223223196007275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2171757815142604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.409886359105935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22457080072421445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1996345899201524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285746347438965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2059000336755104,0.0,0.4125969452960029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314237318127148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690103047783178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2177710916014513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19256313129385064,0.0,0.1536183850976234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13573686404294275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22223450502907915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gibbtock,2020/04/14,"My medication is giving me anxiety I got prescribed 10mg of Fluoxetine (commonly known as Prozac) for my bulimia, and while my doctor told me it'd take three to six weeks to notice a difference, I've been having constant and extreme bouts of anxiety.

It feels as though I'm *just about* to have a panic attack, but it never happens; I'm just teetering on the line between having one, and being okay.

I do have anxiety, and I've had panic attacks before, but this is the strongest it's ever been. I don't like this side effect, and I already want to stop taking them, but some sources say it's best to stick it out until you at least get to the fourth week; I'm barely past my eighth day. 

Does/has anyone else taken Fluoxetine? What has your experiences been like, and what, if any, side effects did you have?",7.292249999999999,6.092239725000002,7.918749999999997,73.91125000000002,64.25,10.75,33.125,9.827888789773867,3.0082500000000008,636,21,122,11,8,213,104,160,0.152,0.758,0.09,-0.8220000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,3,1,3,5,8,2,2,5,1,17,3,0,2,2,22,30,15,0,2,6,0,1,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,10,7,0,1,4,0,0,0,2,4,0,3,8,2,14,4,17,20,3,16,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,2,13,84,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16696186628222842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10288829719862498,0.0,0.3472292503228425,0.0,0.0,0.10579156165605516,0.15502338717348402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3442482032745321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12874404119643915,0.0,0.15877864037482547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635001336411906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757513818028726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807492837430662,0.0,0.15486061990633546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126390640958471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13685832677991114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14799915039630016,0.0,0.0,0.07650116349173132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07904732070631015,0.14513948957496547,0.0,0.0,0.12100738349201763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13379293156442407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478337947182325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15241751236846415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669087670770452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17225456093983946,0.0,0.0,0.10252390773124856,0.0,0.0,0.35503282630398336,0.0,0.0,0.1444317190513217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031879067510932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12649247923395632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275155704885785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1486501943718595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14457238170027242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923988715512539,0.0,0.24272536524295205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sam1234567well,2020/04/14,"Do all Social Media Influencers have amazing and Perfect lives?How do you feel when you are on instagram? We all have seen how perfect and beautiful social media influencers are. Beautiful face, perfect body, superb wardrobe and constantly traveling and staying in fancy hotels. 
Are their lives filled with all the good and happy things only? How come they have their lives so perfect. People say they are faking it and it is not as perfect as it seem. But really..? They seem to have it all. 
And we cannot stop comparing ourselves with them. And we feel super bad about ourselves. Isn’t it ironic, they advertise that following them will improve our lives or... their influence is beneficial to us... but in reality we feel worst. Idk about others, but after seeing them, I feel 10x bad about myself.",4.136161971830987,7.2419326690140835,4.407869718309861,79.26772007042257,77.94366197183099,7.493661971830987,26.480633802816897,8.472884824447931,2.474252112676056,637,25,101,14,16,199,82,142,0.102,0.6940000000000001,0.204,0.9053,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,6,2,10,7,7,13,0,0,1,0,15,2,2,5,9,41,25,18,0,0,5,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,8,15,0,1,6,2,0,4,3,4,0,0,1,7,20,9,13,23,5,12,0,0,2,0,21,3,0,3,4,79,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915410642352516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1939237122963136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1503888476175822,0.0,0.18866352068192094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3531001111543353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14643296145281218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858481495971712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.462483196928724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13277916710984392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103471661336493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118431224343685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13883637980855115,0.0,0.0,0.13912102061346773,0.3178698356827193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3559332547279894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18608355037847385,0.0,0.14596022609030326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598599884220198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2100033218322064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vixhOn,2020/04/14,"I feel terribly sad when I'm being pushed into a corner, being made to admit a fault that I didn't do or didn't intend to do. Who are we anyway, why are we made up of layers. I feel terribly sad when I'm being pushed into a corner, being made to admit a fault that I didn't do or didn't intend to do. It's as if I have no choice but to accept I did something wrong, sure half of the truth maybe I did but I never intended for it to be like the way they think or feel about it. Feels like I'm being forced to admit something just so they could feel better and I do want them to feel better, it's just that I feel bad about myself in return but maybe that's the price I have to pay for hurting people I guess. That's the confusing part because sometimes I don't know when I'm going to hurt someone or already hurting them. Which is another dilemma because since I don't know these things,  maybe they're right, maybe it's just my defense mechanism telling me I didn't want to hurt them and I never intended to, thus maybe I really am bad person. At this point it becomes really confusing, I can't tell who I am anymore. Am I really bad like they think I am or am I someone different. Everytime I see someone I've hurt the more I'm reminded of what I've done and the things they felt and overtime it's being engraved into my mind what they think of me. And it hurts me you know, I can't accept that person, I can't accept that version of myself. If I were really that kind of person, if that's me, if I were those people I've hurt I would hate me too, actually I already do.
Me hurting someone is something that I could never accept. And forgiving myself becomes a hard part as well because how can you really accept and forgive yourself if the person you've hurt hasn't forgiven you yet. I'm lost at who I am in general and I can't find the right answers.",3.6002225693088654,4.035016253807111,5.324568527918784,83.87871925029287,71.74111675126903,8.091995314330338,26.0675517376025,8.139509932561175,1.5002205388520111,1460,43,308,20,26,501,142,394,0.228,0.643,0.129,-0.9929,1,0,3,0,0,0,29.0,2,3,8,3,16,40,2,2,13,0,46,0,0,9,5,80,79,28,0,10,16,0,9,3,0,1,0,0,0,4,29,13,0,1,26,0,2,3,16,24,1,1,15,10,56,16,32,54,4,25,0,12,1,0,27,13,0,13,11,217,85,1,0.0,0.0,0.061144834911995724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13828856551378133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06570201675353872,0.0,0.0,0.062139559287528415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15694957954836347,0.11458657871130898,0.13840091914118655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083121187421197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000540814838404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06546391572919122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412053754811434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22177115878265047,0.044762642794361485,0.060161176905926775,0.0,0.05726796350464328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03560979051003787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06902447344795426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05612895359682645,0.06186146439020908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6036868611519136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524830791159117,0.10330502920674203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09183409898290308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839823444459649,0.0,0.0,0.17786457060935648,0.0,0.0,0.3147401918913974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326637204088996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14497634377040633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357042735193139,0.0,0.08687786027926107,0.2188409976528073,0.0,0.0,0.05923173876035531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2007004980870178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10701859371723596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049930040441927316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0518310614887281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21235851831795427,0.14471077697271176,0.0619700250829221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059054100349945175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095311082109256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325392650731978,0.12044549010755952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07391421919322172,0.04973473177936055,0.0,0.0,0.056336758668535485,0.0,0.056538789811344664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044510201910123115,0.0685063119401412,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PM_YOUR_WITNESSES,2020/04/14,"Emotional response to burglary In 2015 my home was broken into and for some reason I felt nothing, I didn't feel sad or scared for months. I remember I came back home and found all the mess and it felt like a normal day to me, I watched my mom call the cops while crying and there was no emotions inside me. I even made jokes about it the next day in school. But after months it hit me so badly. I started having nightmares, panic attacks, I felt paranoid all the time. I couldn't spend a single night alone in home because I was that it's going to happen again , sometimes I couldn't even go to my parents if it was dark. It took me  3 years to overcome those fears and all the nightmares, but sometimes i still feel a little bit paranoid.

 Is there is some kind of explanation or a reason why all the emotions and fears showed up only months later ?",4.16086274509804,5.2150378117647085,4.511470588235294,87.94995098039217,70.88235294117645,6.372549019607844,25.93137254901961,5.985473137389443,0.7834901960784313,668,20,134,3,12,210,100,170,0.174,0.799,0.027999999999999997,-0.9591,2,1,0,0,1,0,14.0,0,0,0,0,9,11,1,4,10,0,10,0,0,3,4,32,24,13,0,4,5,2,5,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,8,8,0,0,9,2,1,4,4,8,0,0,12,6,19,3,15,9,8,26,0,1,1,0,3,6,0,5,17,90,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11362016926437447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480403881003199,0.0,0.0843555377499093,0.09159818531412199,0.06687448734499749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11976826031687955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201996116610104,0.12547205141969628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050459751920828,0.14149989706857222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3702064103367535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144916800254641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2468948040507459,0.11093918964998103,0.0,0.3159988820691299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202846785917612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12469452417221935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09701080827520277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301259094098446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423974406399368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05359579070550681,0.10995214143170078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1038044953441384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1284838974329972,0.26269385100562426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11667135641453626,0.10294969113476718,0.1074865427395396,0.10526386359298072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343476955251955,0.0,0.12871390529100765,0.12181321319550782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255877881754303,0.0,0.0,0.12427314832897847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098327552686397,0.11102621712551204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21699995085557308,0.0,0.07764899451410259,0.0,0.08760968691392157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06396923409155841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188508426549195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09899071844878496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07064572341516291
mentalhealth,throwaway24686421357,2020/04/14,"I need help. Using a throwaway for obvious reasons.

About a month ago i sm*ked w**d it wasn’t the first time but for some reason it triggered a massive panic attack, it went on for hours and hours. For about 2 weeks afterward I couldn’t sleep properly, whenever I closed my eyes it felt like this intense vertigo and it just made me freak out even more. I had this excruciating brain fog where I couldn’t focus, everything seemed blurry, I was  forgetful and I just felt like I didn’t exist in my own body. It’s gotten so much better and i’m sleeping now but it hasn’t fully gone. I know it’s just my anxiety acting up, but it’s making me really paranoid like I’m terrified I caused permanent damage or that I have a parasitise in my brain. I know it’s not true but it really freaks me out and the more anxious I am the more the fog comes back. Does anyone know what’s happening or what I can do about it, I just want to go back to normal.",1.2035837015218434,3.485363845360826,3.1582179675994126,88.87379725085913,83.22680412371133,6.788021600392735,20.06283750613648,7.957251820313856,0.9402280805105552,742,21,156,15,21,249,111,194,0.228,0.6809999999999999,0.091,-0.9852,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,13,10,1,1,8,0,11,7,6,7,2,42,30,12,0,5,11,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,17,9,0,0,8,0,0,5,6,5,0,1,10,3,23,5,15,18,6,24,0,1,1,0,1,8,0,4,14,103,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12368995711990895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674440973667892,0.15763559592392,0.0,0.09756658858892968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15874197476430812,0.0,0.21458864268180025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12340796562366232,0.0,0.1549926792764081,0.0,0.3115359218761613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1433415754818883,0.0,0.1201976290033286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1221086098358349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09216199759353208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12540566771563494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2679522609537818,0.0,0.0,0.11868897419296788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07930133991706505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339093691132624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09352782191871138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2748290658479169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300554740404024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20451024830847428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203202987222887,0.09314114682573696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113760448371049,0.0,0.1025747765819209,0.10346393524115947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13671533563937188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16371505041292214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17878025332203434,0.28693182784082905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12702803826882192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792728927439225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136437442790542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12051402238975238,0.0,0.0,0.08230175658143597,0.0,0.11192710212441276,0.0,0.0,0.12935096902163587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,XeRTeX,2020/04/14,"Diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder at the age of 19 on my first appointment and prescribed Seroquel (Quetiapine) Sorry So, I ordered an appointment with a psychiatrist at a clinic, and I barely find my way to the clinique whereafter I go beside my doc and sit in a chair of the cabinet. I start describing all of my issues in nouns, like insomnia, anxiety, depression, etc. He looked at me very attentively with a cold stare of a doctor that has been dealing with patients in stress for over 15 years, lol.

I got diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder at 19 and got prescriped Seroquel (Quetiapine.)

What the hell. After the first appointment? I know it's a paid clinic. I just can't believe it. I think my doc is really just taking the phrases ""feeling like being watched in public"" out of the context to apply this kind of diagnosis. I've been severely depressed and suicidal, so I reached out to a clinic... and got diagnosed with schizoaffective disorder. I don't get hallucinations sober at all, or after sleep deprivation. He also refused prescribing me any antidepressants. Is it an alright doc, reddit?

Anyhow, thanks for taking time for my post, my synthax is not 100% correct because I'm not a native speaker but I hope for any responces that might come my way, positive or negative. :)

Edit: I've found 200 mg. of Seroquel ideal for sleep. I'm prescribed 100 but nothing else comes close to knocking me out so fast, lol. Also, I take 1500 mg. of Gabapentin every day because I think it's an alright mood stabilizer, which me and my doc agreed on. We did not agree on the diagnosis though, I think I have OCD and going through a depressive episode and minor drug withdrawal right now.",4.714480519480522,7.281517461038963,5.595454545454544,74.53818181818184,72.44155844155844,8.945454545454545,32.42857142857143,9.516144504307137,3.5960181818181827,1350,66,221,35,28,441,168,308,0.114,0.764,0.122,0.6837,0,0,1,0,0,0,50.0,1,0,0,3,9,15,1,1,20,4,12,11,2,0,3,47,36,19,1,2,9,0,1,2,0,1,9,1,0,0,9,22,0,1,8,0,1,4,6,6,0,2,8,6,29,8,42,26,3,38,1,4,3,0,6,18,1,5,13,143,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16734036907104452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422999133745396,0.0,0.0800393786066519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12755931208511653,0.0,0.0,0.117878815125942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18025381486771289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06747576784052932,0.10786585629799904,0.27034527908594197,0.31858264759379923,0.0,0.0,0.3597348642444275,0.10709018128299598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133411825997907,0.0,0.0874024439583364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668677645280053,0.0,0.0,0.08815277102083909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05290256148816088,0.07474555902850713,0.0,0.0,0.09562719444969636,0.17799136770348034,0.0,0.11471811945555167,0.0,0.0,0.054663295998000586,0.0,0.11892388529374705,0.0,0.251039340587278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10391823162044513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10920341867299826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895293365320197,0.05750027013959685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022309473234974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08786033997555827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11099272677645974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10039244082778448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020375692436503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06702674368772359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935089747255824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118198743851449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20940514685543246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11712137516994207,0.07405553834919111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984988995119235,0.0,0.0,0.1144449706255058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2359994784638856,0.0,0.0,0.09632649653407202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011222959267743,0.10279550910143148,0.0,0.061008852697704986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632824319361806,0.0,0.1660961059452652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737636607294077
mentalhealth,jellyfisharcade,2020/04/14,"How do I survive living with my overbearing and ranting Mother? I'm in a bit of a difficult situation. Due to Covid-19, I can't move out anytime soon.  I live with my Mum.

She has many good qualities, but I'm finding being with her very intense due to her bad traits. Every conversation we have derails into negativity. Slagging off the neighbours, bitching about people and commenting how only obese people only die of coronavirus. (I don't agree) 

She had a traumatic decade long relationship with a narcissist who emotionally abused her, and she complains and moans about him still even though they broke up 5 years ago. I do sympathise, but she is in a much better relationship now.  She also bitches about old friends, and I often ask why was she was friends with them then?

When she goes off into her tirades, I slowly but eventually mentally switch off. I don't even answer back and I start looking at other things. I don't mean to, but the wave of negatively and pessimism seeps into me, and I have my own mental health issues I'm trying to cope with. I feel like an exhausted, broken shell of a person after a conversation. The only time she doesn't go into a diatribe is when she is focused on a task, but then she is barely responsive to me socially due to her intense concentration.

I would just like a nice, average conversation about pleasant things, such as sunny weather, easter chocolate or something objective, but she doesn't seem interested. Instead I feel like an unwitting therapist, and I can't handle this. She occasionally mentions she 'goes off on one,' but never seems to change.

I'm not sure what's not right about her, but being in such close proximity is making me feel really miserable. I can get space sometimes - but is there a way to improve our social interactions and maybe have a better relationship?",6.6664631522323825,7.75854971301775,7.263948359332978,70.34800968262509,65.18343195266272,10.287466379774072,33.41097364174287,10.33465798735191,3.658297041420118,1465,61,246,35,22,483,191,338,0.174,0.687,0.139,-0.9487,0,0,1,0,1,0,42.0,2,0,2,3,23,20,2,1,17,0,26,3,0,3,2,51,42,29,1,1,13,2,3,3,3,1,3,0,0,1,6,23,1,0,8,0,0,2,12,8,0,1,3,4,46,12,41,36,3,41,1,2,1,0,44,19,2,4,22,184,52,0,0.0,0.1290563228719777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965539510818473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710593961401526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10182860058928088,0.0,0.0,0.08375530960905958,0.09094642243117644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19266764987857665,0.11891605449684275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.115226429794139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11304520933745095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12252407426978786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14388565109816695,0.0,0.09177259488521093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16522471004440364,0.15562968307757935,0.0,0.0,0.0995539411253069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16830777360041124,0.0,0.056907939031536174,0.0,0.06190363286854765,0.09135971294520197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578039562665092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11368764686464593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964329659982188,0.0,0.1923625741735899,0.0963937105419856,0.09146815572193072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270716187249644,0.11043115024190872,0.10942811518270053,0.1186494273949504,0.0,0.0,0.2195381749500092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157682511899554,0.0800711730437497,0.0,0.08400837925792527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429670141674028,0.0,0.07380926055826438,0.24852327929256754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15102743066169858,0.09510764161521372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977906790331291,0.0,0.0,0.3508286466469964,0.0,0.09301992009350056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983193992239924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12243437533609865,0.0,0.22206721531121548,0.0,0.0838544932122517,0.10772794859623057,0.0,0.07709648648843831,0.0,0.08698630401696616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026589400017644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264683697303294,0.14472762764278024,0.0,0.10701660882055034,0.0,0.06351406380310395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07395178433401947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08987314633463993,0.0,0.08645826141598244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09828635431952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07737600133234424,0.0,0.0,0.07014304685882132
mentalhealth,whatuphuncho,2020/04/14,"Just realized I'm only living for other people I just realized I personally have no will to live. Like I'm not going to kill myself because I know that a lot of people care about me and that they don't deserve the pain of my death. Sometimes I think they don't, but I always know deep down a few people care at least, so I cant kill myself. I feel like I have no personal will to live like I would never restart my life because the only reason I'm still alive is other people. If no one cared about me I think i would actually do it, but since there will always be family and friends, the thought doesn't seriously cross my mind as I know it's not a reality. Does anyone feel the same way?",4.263693486590043,4.381772365517243,5.829885057471267,81.9608429118774,70.17241379310343,8.651340996168582,25.766283524904214,8.515128840125781,1.5226398467432951,543,14,116,8,9,186,81,145,0.063,0.6940000000000001,0.242,0.9806,0,0,0,0,0,2,10.0,0,0,2,0,7,11,2,0,7,0,14,2,0,1,1,26,29,7,3,3,7,0,2,3,1,5,2,0,0,2,6,2,0,0,11,0,0,2,10,4,0,1,1,2,21,7,11,22,4,8,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,2,5,80,27,0,0.0,0.0,0.1242353307206078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.211862762766108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08901749260538053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521290852919442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3894003793455674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11140906359770032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12001570247471102,0.0,0.12874262651625049,0.0909496564916708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09835870568601424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07235270333583307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2816973444917689,0.0,0.20989727892917706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992219220835937,0.18659040743164573,0.0,0.3372488402656522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082336561206847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854591340880334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981886370882295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08626795044403017,0.1936486359574069,0.135465873274559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35304043978947003,0.2223228156372896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13089497251299514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10531141469136597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12591196904893082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166922290626784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631490794913975,0.0,0.10106921596386953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10105204895560832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18087348384222454,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anthropocenix,2020/04/14,"Needing help with toxic relatives. Feeling emotionally drained. I've recently moved to Italy. I'm living with my boyfriend, his brother and his brother's wife, my sister-in-law. 

My sister-in-law is extremely toxic, constantly emotionally hurting me, and whenever I try to make her understand how she makes me feel, she victimizes herself.

Also, she makes me work like crazy at home. And if I don't, she shames/humilliates me in front of everyone. Of course, my boyfriend's there to stop her from going further, but she's really smart in everything she does. Everyone likes her and believes her. And she could manage to make everyone look down on me.

And other days, she's all happy with me, putting makeup on each other, watching movies, etc. 

All I know about her life, is that she doesn't really know how to cook (I do) and her husband has many other women. 

I'm tired of her, and I can't move from this house. Should I seek professional help or does anyone has advice for me?! 

HELP ME PLEASE CUZ IM TIRED OF THIS SICK DEMON 

She's 24 and I'm 21.",2.8097524752475245,5.2257889356435685,3.946029702970296,84.76072772277229,77.96039603960395,7.406336633663367,24.456435643564358,8.395991825355821,1.7464922772277225,823,29,158,17,20,267,112,202,0.106,0.754,0.139,0.8455,0,0,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,1,5,6,1,0,0,0,10,5,0,7,2,34,25,16,0,4,3,4,2,2,0,1,4,0,1,1,6,13,1,1,5,1,0,5,3,2,0,0,0,4,38,4,22,23,4,16,1,1,2,0,28,7,0,2,6,97,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083235092083153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888531706049387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646110306912068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13931466833917813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1336250423500281,0.0,0.09872691630658392,0.0,0.0,0.0797460019223247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2164192733052281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27818612566259593,0.0,0.0,0.1379058615725106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3544674281992713,0.11113140798123254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250454171963279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027489044407052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163099453903132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24864614314274375,0.0,0.12403411334237563,0.0,0.0,0.14267904319059546,0.13237317110559133,0.0,0.13356653681029976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13591298920594866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733982165948251,0.12082129011185393,0.0,0.10918792806792486,0.0,0.10383743771758176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.330157543156731,0.12536480696282118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26284729319688555,0.0,0.09168718613820348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357339408132375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12430549063895488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15843064857300745,0.0,0.12209249105227145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337950506934143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28424203248759106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395231913533215,0.0,0.0,0.12872720888563716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002090916861362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nishagupta09,2020/04/14,"Lockdown leading to existential crisis beyond my control Is it just me or has lockdown has just started making me lose interest in everything! 
I have been readings books - exploring new genres
Trying out new hobbies Like origami
Working out regularly

The latest news of lockdown extension has just made me numb again. :(

I know it's important for the society
But I don't understand how to make up my mind for another 3 WEEKS!!😫😫",5.034505494505496,7.626343256410259,6.304432234432237,69.7096153846154,71.56410256410257,9.585347985347983,36.78388278388279,9.957137785484203,4.614495970695972,346,20,52,10,7,116,60,78,0.154,0.759,0.087,-0.7701,0,3,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,4,6,4,0,0,2,0,7,1,0,6,0,18,13,3,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,3,2,0,2,1,2,0,0,2,0,8,2,10,11,0,12,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,1,6,36,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26245857956159196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2807297444034336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249511054218904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13755686946859694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12228263486839977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800186942728228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23683739030202536,0.3341508293903037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527289565882749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.48347745166566103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503650690015557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17716174197782267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16993546050827996,0.0,0.0,0.2605683529321331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18221944089813946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Angelixsaint,2020/04/14,"I need help, and the internet is thus far failing to provide any based on my search inquiries. I'm having a rough time with my mind, one that's lasted for many years and I'm finally ready to confront it.

​

I have anger problems that I don't know how to resolve.

I have control issues that cause me to emotionally hurt the people I love.

I have self esteem issues that stop me from being able to make friends, find a job, or find any level of happiness.

My depression has gotten to the point that I no longer enjoy anything. I despise waking every morning because I know it's just going to be another boring and shitty day.

I've pushed away from everything in my life that makes me happy because I refuse to be a burden to it and I just can't take it anymore. I can't take living in the shadows, I can't take living with guilt and self hatred every single day. I need to find a way to deal with this and reddit is the only place I have left to look to.

I don't know how to help myself fix any of these things, and I don't know where to search that can give me any assistance in doing so.

I also don't know if anyone here can help, or even give links to find self help, but I pray something gives because I can't anymore.

​

\*I'm not suicidal",4.721780888030889,4.914622884169884,5.530074806949808,84.24638634169888,69.1930501930502,7.864961389961388,27.384411196911195,7.413659706084162,1.3932102316602322,993,29,203,9,16,325,136,259,0.114,0.767,0.11900000000000001,0.6581,1,0,1,0,0,1,30.0,0,0,0,3,10,16,3,1,9,0,22,3,1,7,0,41,44,15,1,4,7,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,3,14,10,0,3,11,0,0,2,10,10,0,1,1,2,29,6,29,40,1,21,1,3,1,1,14,11,0,3,7,127,43,2,0.08662662330151955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927527935688821,0.0,0.18771982030995102,0.2105216581355309,0.2356362975940864,0.09083556764607002,0.0,0.0,0.1718206660940968,0.060571349181737885,0.0,0.07128632991049169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08138856416584085,0.0,0.0,0.15842035657607462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898940453227076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971591240439439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173401117547868,0.08930824486160198,0.07461138371436421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974432915894748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05721606769551148,0.0,0.14597333261431436,0.0,0.07785442330649033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09489523155091953,0.3167006572959429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692751427612388,0.0,0.0,0.2493004517227841,0.04923190633357093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18443130263996504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322559983526349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092735591898715,0.0,0.0,0.18083137684696768,0.08596355691950408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380386334229952,0.07061225989213342,0.0,0.0,0.09412007968317994,0.0,0.06118694589147153,0.0,0.0,0.15298579089710473,0.0,0.07274454610069518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818390965880365,0.0,0.11564788744103655,0.08782579944157813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874681950601184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12846508707223694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05870044186374189,0.06588345056595292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06005599328819381,0.0,0.09050638381317724,0.0,0.08189015921905952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08288997931853308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711113820040741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668940681140823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07242373596349269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09475546582196016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953973197193636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575508793088096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05051268067996708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06876018143933046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105216581355309,0.055784705240769936
mentalhealth,yuri05,2020/04/14,"I hear Terraria's sounds in everything! When I hear someone speak, I DONT, I hear the footsteps of my character. When I hear a squishy sound, I hear the noise that happens when you kill things. I randomly hear the sound you hear when you get hurt.

I have tried to stop playing the game many many times to stop this but it hasn't worked at all. PLEASE can some give me some tips to kick this out of my head? I'm currently going for 6 months without playing but so far it hasn't helped.

This isn't a joke and no I'm not just addicted to the game I haven't played in around 3 months.",1.6814381520119248,3.4604429262295113,2.276438152011924,98.49576005961254,78.75409836065575,6.075707898658719,21.746646795827125,6.980632752743323,0.2329245901639352,455,13,109,5,11,140,73,122,0.11599999999999999,0.797,0.086,-0.3499,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,0,1,7,6,1,0,7,0,7,2,1,0,1,14,20,8,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,11,0,0,7,3,0,2,0,6,0,1,8,2,0,0,0,11,15,4,13,20,3,17,0,1,0,0,15,6,0,3,10,63,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1171068095090699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09562914968424707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589883047090192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965447694980534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05612402783992726,0.1030498273792591,0.0610509056140953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949937094491274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024687965233024,0.0,0.8475138531371988,0.0,0.0720033007540951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11499842865550597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884751500218599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21781990548410032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17148785652632112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11791807794867012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101906857977726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796206971377151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07136699677815378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263915273995292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07293309287610601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103551835390388,0.0,0.07820514545408007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thenews1985,2020/04/14,"First time here, I live alone and have cerebral palsy. I've been feeling depressed for a few days now during this quarantine. Any advice?",3.4606666666666683,6.520066800000002,3.2360000000000007,86.70466666666668,81.0,4.933333333333334,24.333333333333336,6.42735559955562,1.013133333333334,110,4,18,1,3,33,24,25,0.205,0.736,0.057999999999999996,-0.5859,0,2,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,1,0,1,2,1,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,11,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4076332270130704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43204061367854346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2836756609154524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26902662951816736,0.0,0.35928986837925714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109230952906467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3548267716624213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3683502566159699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2432429676209694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,big_iron_hip,2020/04/14,"Don't know what to do for career Hello! 

I'm currently in nursing school; however, I'm not sure if it's for me. I want to be one, yet at the same time lack the motivation to get through all the years of school and to do much in general. I just want to start working and make a name for myself; alas, I'm not sure how. I've thought about becoming a paramedic because I'd still like to do something medical related. 

Everyone always tells me to do what makes me happy, but I don't know what does.  Nor do I want to disappoint my family should I choose to forgo nursing.

Any tips?",2.193249999999999,3.7340318250000015,4.135000000000002,86.79,76.58333333333334,8.133333333333335,26.166666666666664,8.841846274778883,1.9108166666666668,449,17,98,10,10,153,76,120,0.08800000000000001,0.828,0.084,-0.3515,2,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,5,0,9,1,0,4,3,26,22,6,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,5,0,0,0,5,1,0,1,1,0,10,4,18,19,4,9,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,1,7,62,14,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15967646143511527,0.0,0.0,0.13049881643369302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11698067031418273,0.21193885630390755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16793328676374927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18336900516940213,0.0,0.0,0.1809065683615932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10026001085929027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20428148764499765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210926824054626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09375281623325717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561899433695901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19331941055895085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106883530668166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13003664147785976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884267922619656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773426244450122,0.0,0.0,0.13582805323982047,0.0,0.15325186492024562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3617276118074273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16772936153871912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234743995997607,0.11189863549772912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33956338970033473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397057380635888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235775317020701
mentalhealth,TheIrishman34,2020/04/14,Why do I pick the skin on my fingers? 25 (m)  I have been picking my fingers my entire life. What does this mean? I typically do it when I'm thinking and honestly I do my best thinking when I pick. How can I stop? Its gross and I want to stop.,-2.5171698113207555,-1.0811826226415064,0.7260566037735856,99.29700943396229,111.07547169811322,3.6294339622641516,18.50754716981132,5.6839178017228535,-0.3220475471698112,183,7,45,2,10,64,35,53,0.135,0.7020000000000001,0.163,0.3695,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,1,0,6,4,3,4,0,12,11,5,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,2,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,11,2,2,10,1,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,30,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3468788488216417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28925570637260634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23346850234489516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3600523781346754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5526885162599872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4235903319566077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949596573712135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.298258798107243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,arrrkay,2020/04/14,"My mental health is going whack Reddit has helped me get some answers so I'm just trying to get lucky again.

A few months ago I posted here and in r/anxiety. The thing is that I had just started taking Lexapro and while continuing with Lurasidone (idk if it's a common atypical antipsychotic). The doctor had prescribed it to me after I had raised concerns with my anxiety. I was unsure of how it'd affect me considering the stigma and all. 

Everything was going well and good. I was starting to feel better, even making fun conversations with colleagues. 

*enter cute and coo girl*

We were going good as friends. Well not that much, considering my condition. Nevertheless, she kinda played a part in opening me up, feeling stuff, after a long time. Sure, things were pretty plastic. But it was good. 

Then some things happened, my tactile hallucinations started acting up and the whole accompanying delusions started coming. I've recently googled and found out about 'delusion of reference' and I was exactly that, a definition of it, in my psychotic phase 2-3 years ago. It basically means that you assign meaning to everything. Like, a bell would ring, a bulb would flicker, and you would assign meaning to it, like it's a sign. I even applied it to my tactile hallucinations. All these conflicting ""signs"" and ""meaning"" really cooked me up good.

So thinking of that, I spoke with my doctor about a month or two ago and asked about taking abilify in the morning (since lurasidone makes me very drowsy I only take it at night). He prescribed it to me saying he was thinking the same thing. 

Coming back to now, the tactile hallucinations remain and the delusion if reference too came with it, though in not that much of an explicit way (I can still compose myself and fught against it). 

The girl. Oh the girl. I've been on a roller coaster ride of emotions. Since the lock down started, I don't go to work and work from home. I've been very productive, painting, sketching, writing, playing music. And now this girl, she got me going aaaahhhh... It's the literal going crazy in love (read attachment) thing that's happening to me. I've been having so many mood swings since a couple of days ago. I'll get moody then ecstatic and I can't even talk to my doctor right now because of the lock down. I took abilify also for the reason that the guy/gal in r/anxiety, who recommended it to me, talked about it helping with the negative emotions. I feel like it worked too well and now I'm going crazy emotionally. 

Did I mention my tactile hallucinations telling me about things to do or not do every single time I'm making a decision?",4.220723352622739,6.639133905544147,5.009137110322944,78.86321845249209,73.39425051334703,7.71269367183125,28.727319395183873,8.575989854853784,2.424634907597536,2080,86,362,40,44,672,239,487,0.035,0.8370000000000001,0.128,0.9909,0,0,0,0,0,0,77.0,1,2,0,4,29,21,0,0,29,0,28,6,0,6,5,76,72,32,0,5,10,0,3,3,1,3,4,3,1,4,35,29,1,1,15,5,0,14,6,1,3,1,20,6,41,19,53,48,11,65,0,0,0,1,25,17,0,8,35,250,76,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24155144317997645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05447877893023119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15634413753349494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06368679156508009,0.0,0.0,0.0523831901319719,0.0,0.04152778915305911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060250187020847626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07791576582977296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11736567555124555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537796663333017,0.0,0.04393437709906272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20918355842413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22989116420831324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13498587947293386,0.0,0.05739745108955384,0.0,0.12245100865502873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10333670117338732,0.04866783560877405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07469450562114556,0.05263247277307878,0.0,0.10677601471077992,0.0,0.2710152765101251,0.2285568872444706,0.05448502679326205,0.0,0.0,0.0674535208861284,0.1204837465396084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07241268053302923,0.0,0.0,0.09132423071358728,0.0,0.06833397759601391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09984591064276467,0.0,0.0,0.060287641349736174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061484615720710366,0.0,0.1364199989982869,0.06906709516823924,0.0,0.2968282509271268,0.0,0.0,0.06865302040736836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875193504998873,0.0,0.1001580318004596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06392980696452367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051811410532933165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377170853591787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524400958077832,0.06930665085208401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0681424862832504,0.0,0.043642011453034375,0.07004287041876676,0.0672642817639837,0.0,0.0,0.05817756728573551,0.0,0.054174979612699965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905875675504745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410927694662851,0.0,0.054403955086154615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07798573979857804,0.0,0.0,0.06420611180305924,0.0,0.15366242450947915,0.10951106331694367,0.05954342321726859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27155155433898404,0.08730228223717704,0.06693153417129005,0.0,0.07944736389326915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756883272116601,0.04625175881325262,0.0,0.06654729896401983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241895311904483,0.0,0.054073700728619285,0.0,0.0,0.18375510951445634,0.0,0.0,0.07605807003284942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14878536133008874,0.0,0.0,0.14518011365593986,0.0,0.0,0.04386965527549088
mentalhealth,Ash0814,2020/04/14,"Need advice to help my mom . So my mom's a teacher and she used to teach this 10 year old boy . Two months back the boy committed suicide . He was one of my mom's favourite student and they were close ...he loved my mom more than his own mother . He didn't left any suicide note  so till date we don't know what happened with him that lead to this .
I've noticing change in my mom's behaviour . She seems to be depressed how do I help her?",0.9340458937198052,2.8429380326086964,1.8640579710144929,99.90509661835749,81.71739130434783,4.958454106280193,21.09178743961353,5.82211442006289,-0.21443140096618368,337,10,81,2,9,105,67,92,0.122,0.765,0.113,-0.4404,0,0,0,0,0,2,10.0,1,0,1,1,4,2,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,3,1,12,12,6,2,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,3,0,13,1,9,8,2,10,0,1,0,1,21,3,0,1,6,44,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319914305839092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09185403403061136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103862530530086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14288895400455975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163378757643866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11944429856049847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18107270055012054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423239614026171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14675682974912993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190834046827635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7909772775868208,0.10781370078720504,0.0,0.0,0.10015465868510444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15378110760207508,0.14173602480600514,0.0,0.0915287235390578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296506784318666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954951124614917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194635250224468,0.0,0.0,0.11665940166572207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08698235825110674
mentalhealth,Alauren2,2020/04/14,"My roommate, who has mental illness killed his dog yesterday (a 5lb mini chihuahua who was the sweetest kindest pup I’ve ever met) and I heard it and didnt realize he killed her until it was too late. Don’t make my mistakes. I’m sorry for the depressing post but I just wanted to let everyone know that people aren’t the only victims of domestic violence and mental illness and to remind people to treat animals like you would treat your kids. Look out for all living creatures. 


My housemate needlessly killed his pup yesterday and I am completely shattered. I heard him abuse her from behind my closed door and I was so scared that I was paralyzed. I went out to check on her when I heard him leave and I found her passed away in her bed. She wasn’t my dog but I loved her with my whole heart and I am shattered. 

In these times of quarantine abuse is going to skyrocket, don’t just look out for people. Check on every living creature. If you know someone who has mental health issues and or violent behavior and has kids or pets, CHECK ON THEM. Don’t make the mistake I made because I am completely shattered and now homeless.",3.9492929292929295,5.83235445454546,4.67757575757576,83.2958080808081,72.63636363636364,7.7979797979797985,27.676767676767675,8.515128840125781,2.098055555555555,900,34,167,16,18,289,123,220,0.27,0.67,0.06,-0.9953,1,1,0,0,3,0,17.0,0,3,1,0,7,13,5,1,5,0,19,5,1,3,2,36,36,19,3,5,7,0,0,1,0,1,3,3,3,2,8,16,0,0,4,0,3,3,6,9,0,0,13,5,34,4,23,21,2,22,0,1,2,1,26,10,0,3,9,114,42,0,0.0,0.2913204595813478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11550334850397714,0.0,0.0,0.0749412477591066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577941891013637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10588544894297486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11120354530759076,0.1035797159099811,0.11747156184721398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13479406359358045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06986792423533418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13067627108020569,0.0,0.1456809245144949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283142770392769,0.0,0.0,0.4080346928619524,0.0,0.13512590873402405,0.0,0.13867827895097085,0.1301725212148969,0.0,0.12571140103281625,0.0,0.06006080329836075,0.0,0.2171112281344459,0.0,0.20647221747053954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095543283357744,0.1163259519876682,0.16412279026857512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3716747110805871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934991202923526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556870879937496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773965304941968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230813730532196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10416411228524576,0.0,0.0,0.13761789478201525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07168554722946037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251142161381402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1139638209495867,0.0,0.13725475847999416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873309101293166,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lereners,2020/04/14,"If feel like my senses are out of whack... everything is too much? Note: I do frequently speak to a professional about my mental health, but it has become quite hard because of the whole virus thing. Tele-health makes me very uncomfortable because of the great lack of privacy in my home, but I will definitely be consulting a professional soon. I’m not looking to this as a replacement for professional help, but I am in great need of answers. 

For the past two to three months, I’ve been on edge. Everything is loud, but only to me. It feels similar to when I have panic attacks. (I’m referring to loud not really as sound, but just too much. A really pungent smell could give me the same reaction as my mother yelling at me) Almost anything sets me off: sniffing, chewing, talking. I’ll give a few more in-depth examples:

1. This is a less extreme anecdote where my reaction feels more appropriate - A few days ago, I was at the dinner table with my family. It feels like everyone in my household tries to smack their lips and gulp really loud at the dinner table, and I couldn’t help but tear up and physically cringe as a reaction.  Later that dinner, my sister and I were having a casual conversation, but to others it may sound like bickering. My mother slams her hands on the table repeatedly, almost knocking many things over, saying that she is sick of our constant arguing. I immediately go silent, feel nauseous, lose my appetite, and clean up my plate to sit in my bedroom. I sit on my floor and cover my ears, trying to block out the sound. 

2. My younger brother isn’t very old, so he likes to dance around and incoherently sing along with songs. I do not like either of those. His dancing and my sister’s constant tiktok dances put me over edge all the time. I don’t know why, but just looking at them flailing around makes me so angry. The singing doesn’t help either because of the aforementioned problem with everything being “loud.”

3. Someone in my household overcooked one of those mug cake things, and it smelled horrid. The smell engulfed the entire house, so I, once again, fled to my bedroom to escape the smell, but it had permeated into there too. I couldn’t help but cry and bury my face as hard as I could into my blankets to try to block out the smell. 

The only thing I can conclude is that a lot of sounds, smells, and actions have been setting me off for no reason. Had I experienced any of the three anecdotes above six months ago, I would have brushed it off and it would be no big deal.  

If someone has had a similar experience or just has some sort of insight on this, I would greatly appreciate anything that you have to say.",5.935721153846156,6.604985315581857,6.275847509861936,78.28732156065092,66.65285996055225,9.33552761341223,31.031126725838266,9.354420925462401,2.6465404832347144,2093,77,395,38,32,674,251,507,0.113,0.784,0.102,-0.8086,1,0,0,0,1,0,69.0,1,1,2,3,17,14,2,1,28,0,40,11,4,4,1,77,57,35,0,12,21,5,8,5,0,5,2,14,4,0,22,23,5,2,11,7,0,7,10,5,0,5,8,32,53,9,69,37,15,57,0,1,2,0,27,30,0,9,21,276,75,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14822896764900886,0.0,0.16744501130775666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05685710214985267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13760644460951313,0.14885977355724128,0.0,0.09511750019877334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15290212057190314,0.09233975856414754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18070361844954266,0.0,0.13351023656353675,0.0,0.09184074640351343,0.05392099733259776,0.0861973821990249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798921441814836,0.2254275904324555,0.08178581083841968,0.07881928371465871,0.0,0.21137654065918765,0.11946081439265452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16041106733082516,0.04751701764151418,0.0,0.0,0.2765382126924533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1497947862124223,0.0,0.0,0.17774527427867054,0.0,0.0,0.2241658548887876,0.0,0.08386681380214828,0.0,0.0,0.09647375569738688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0459494128343739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20423608409196287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14042128927409164,0.0935372739594195,0.0,0.07108152577825083,0.0,0.0,0.11161953937973773,0.0847665746105765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08425837748680548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334720823860363,0.0,0.1229247191413131,0.06199513956833792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08773375851977759,0.08904103651069628,0.056655736885453785,0.12717708152980808,0.0,0.09809734547723788,0.0,0.0,0.07981441259472577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000268327813495,0.0,0.08405030807311162,0.0,0.08892864312102511,0.0,0.0,0.16068652421147928,0.08596415104513648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13297873437938199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416835555153806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06720188315960941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22218486758345332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04875317893903041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17029541295013975,0.0,0.08167400944002573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379726417333175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.075444270646249,0.0933466515780259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1781806648478732,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AtomicDuckiez,2020/04/14,"Is this Isolation/Quarantine/Lockdown thing fucking with everyone else? I really need to know if the stress is getting to anyone else. 

I'm in my final year of high school and it's going to remote learning. This is stressing me out a lot, I have lost all motivation to do it, I can't bring myself to do the required work and I don't even know why. I have a goal at the end of the year but it feels so unachievable. I'm typically an extroverted outgoing person, but I feel like I can't talk to anyone about this (Hence the Reddit post) I really don't know how to move forward. 

The isolation is also making me clash with my family, I have never kept myself in the 4 walls of my room for so long and it's just a black hole of my energy and motivation. 

I also don't have a job anymore which was a nice outlet at times, so the uncertainty of what's happening is killing me. 

Sorry, this post is a bit of a mess.",2.98873015873016,4.064764460317459,5.221031746031748,81.6753571428572,73.70899470899471,8.786243386243386,24.61111111111111,9.23628265651192,1.866168253968254,709,21,150,16,14,249,103,189,0.125,0.782,0.09300000000000001,-0.7156,1,4,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,6,9,8,2,2,16,0,18,1,0,4,2,27,34,13,1,2,4,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,11,7,0,2,8,0,0,4,6,6,0,0,3,3,19,2,22,31,3,21,0,1,1,1,2,9,1,2,9,104,30,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23026091498302545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14277670243665974,0.20133032178031185,0.1475113323526829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571748128540286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24053211821296866,0.0,0.12751214064788804,0.0,0.0,0.09508892798127136,0.0,0.0,0.13756675708641422,0.0,0.0,0.13571939228303567,0.0,0.14558820780463394,0.10285014254698367,0.0,0.1577089478908621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330952867943354,0.07521688055524617,0.0,0.08181983460741875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12730965278389464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521091714343591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428651566275656,0.0,0.15927829281432482,0.0,0.23736169976702315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703350649964688,0.0,0.0,0.12740637484860584,0.0,0.0,0.15715712307037624,0.12239570098225815,0.0,0.0,0.09609917356247806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301426953837016,0.0,0.10674979865557936,0.11103632174733168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12570654008922005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2757614182665665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18445805295571674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570241608605636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16115940917550844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32982770952369816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571532133831765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564536044275447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394838808006988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12990793725573405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480978131509704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1854202161296784
mentalhealth,Lareylafer,2020/04/14,"Living with ADHD Over the last few years, I have done some major reflecting. I have been diagnosed with ADHD since 2nd grade back in 1995, and it’s been a challenge. Now my son, who is 4, is acting almost exactly how I did before I was diagnosed. The scary part about all this is that I have a history of depression as well. I’ve never made any real friends and because of that, I have attempted suicide back in my teens. 

Over my adult years, I have learned how to live with my lack of attention and have become successful in my professional life. I find what brings me joy is just putting my nose to the grind stone. It takes my mind off of the lack of friendship in my life and gives me hope for my son. 

I really want to hear what others have to say about living with ADHD. It’s lonely, and I would love to hear other experiences.",5.308742514970064,5.383567568862276,5.902640718562875,82.48809281437126,67.92215568862275,9.554251497005989,27.47844311377245,9.3871,2.0426292215568864,652,18,136,12,10,212,98,167,0.102,0.7559999999999999,0.142,0.7346,0,2,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,3,9,9,0,0,6,0,17,6,1,3,3,29,26,8,1,5,1,2,0,0,1,1,4,3,0,1,11,9,0,0,4,0,0,3,1,2,1,0,6,4,21,7,25,19,7,17,0,2,0,1,10,7,0,3,7,99,32,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4745582700587595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13180210669911666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950861880720974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20242097697029748,0.0,0.08023657618599403,0.14536801802322386,0.11200206069020048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336728630954496,0.2671905375609511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346967276777173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875321972760154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030166277152855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10169213188666232,0.0,0.0,0.12626543154037342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29669891636561097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13073201747848706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729087018144044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18593940141468396,0.0,0.0,0.3486783737516704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118795513899346,0.1245455124935872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13290239932181466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151629957822472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14253562332674982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13231815730102564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498165686824352,0.08432150249933226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10467243664352087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088804717108854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397494709864728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098964629729722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07763505917826853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183454994419984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09350168876967528,0.0,0.0,0.16952267431293894
mentalhealth,ImaPeeInUrAssTBH,2020/04/14,"I feel so hopeless  I am 14 years old, male. My family is going through terrible times at the moment. I feel hopeless everyday like I'm never gonna be happy. I can't see myself doing anything in the future, or even being alive. I just want to be happy again. I would give anything for everything to be ok.",1.8169892473118312,3.9069517741935513,4.2367741935483885,83.09182795698926,79.64516129032258,6.713978494623658,23.23655913978495,7.793537801064563,1.4012817204301071,238,8,45,4,6,83,48,62,0.23,0.644,0.126,-0.8435,0,1,0,0,0,2,8.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,1,9,0,0,0,1,7,17,2,0,2,2,0,2,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,3,8,4,6,11,0,11,0,2,1,0,2,2,0,1,9,31,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4138312561109771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607529938695428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259801692075803,0.0,0.237037467816022,0.0,0.254273612203588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412064117926808,0.14290048080986342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5353301098086649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12284203034647848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19392783963918808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2638464469785936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20036699693574672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14661805511358578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14830721144539796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17861742972365302,0.0,0.0,0.16192062819445824
mentalhealth,The_Retarded_Fish,2020/04/14,"Hearing voices and extreme paranoia I am a 14 year old male with adhd and autism, medicated for the former with ritalin (which I only take if I will need to be calm or concentrated). Recently I have been hearing voices, not saying anything just mumbles of different pitches, mostly pronouncing vowels like a baby would do. I am also suffering from major paranoia. I already have quite severe paranoia however this it has gotten to the point were I am scared to go downstairs because I irrationally fear that someone is waiting to kill me. The only time I'm not paranoid is when I escape into video games or cuddling with my cats or walking the dog

I originally came to the conclusion that this was all due to lack of sleep though I have a pretty modest sleep cycle of 1am-12pm most nights. 

I honestly dont know what to do and it gets worse by the day",10.021677018633538,7.819987440993793,9.870683229813668,65.26018633540373,59.683229813664596,12.18136645962733,41.633540372670815,10.608840637214634,4.5345130434782615,682,30,113,12,7,225,111,161,0.17800000000000002,0.736,0.085,-0.9439,3,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,2,4,7,1,2,9,0,18,5,2,1,1,25,29,10,1,4,7,0,0,1,0,2,2,5,0,1,8,8,0,1,2,2,0,3,3,4,0,0,5,5,14,3,17,21,5,15,0,1,0,1,5,2,0,6,11,83,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19342273388024328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776050836075494,0.12870640752735754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13244273446119434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09810962469053862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18407641482816112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379520162546667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1681516354322426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886245082092229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18110611030556725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408630255285622,0.0,0.09146786355452244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3627898985026834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17806006604927746,0.0,0.08845030332612862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862883320485407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16213357954263086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193375183994315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15103451196765594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16888306235788242,0.0,0.0,0.24480947075406936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1521435684240294,0.0,0.0,0.1637373345013545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711831549793272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891222657243126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12798868000966152,0.1611324561270089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818202718186629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32211933461266656,0.0,0.1363668509413996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12100943412533098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812610859934265,0.0,0.09384741173546324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640151109458786,0.1143295991576182,0.0,0.0,0.10364229597001468
mentalhealth,Popular33,2020/04/14,Is this a bad sleep schedule? Due to the quarantine and not being in school I (16M) go to sleep from about 1am to 9am. Is it bad staying up late though i'm getting 8ish hours of sleep?,-0.2557142857142836,1.2608560476190505,1.9907142857142863,99.49178571428571,83.76190476190476,5.152380952380953,20.02380952380953,5.985473137389443,-0.30416190476190463,142,4,37,1,4,48,34,42,0.17800000000000002,0.8220000000000001,0.0,-0.8105,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,3,3,3,0,0,2,6,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,8,5,0,8,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,19,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3961921812060915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12395474109995695,0.0,0.1348361742834404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2336461140478817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2676313744054833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24011239405654464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7122721093623687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528798058153852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233099568627773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,katanacrow,2020/04/14,"I want to die I have to deal with chronic fatigue. It makes it hard to live. I have voices in my head. Im seeing things that aren’t there. I smell things that don’t exist. Right now I smell metallic blood. I’m so anxious and angry and irritated right now and I don’t know what to do. 

I asked my mom for help but she always gets mad at me. I’m afraid to say anything to her. It’s always wrong. I’m so ready to just slit my wrists and get it over with. If I die than I’ll be at peace. If I don’t succeed maybe I’ll at least be able to go to a hospital where someone can help me. 

My head is in such a daze. Nothing feels real. I think this might be a simulation of some kind. If I’m dead maybe I’ll be out of it. That way. It kind of feels like I’m the only one who exists, a main character in the movie or book, and everybody else isn’t real. Even then I still feel hollow. Like I’m not even a part of this world. It seems that I always have a slight headache. It’s not pounding, but it’s still there. This irritates me.

My head is never quiet. There’s always music, voices telling me to do things, and ten thoughts playing at once. I just want to listen to the ambience of the wind and nature but I always dissociate inside my own head.

I’m sick of living in this agony. I want out of this prison. Please help...",-0.8410295260295264,1.2188728496503531,1.4125291375291376,99.08537490287493,91.48251748251751,4.296658896658896,15.287101787101786,5.82211442006289,-0.8657448329448331,1009,21,246,8,36,337,139,286,0.16399999999999998,0.6970000000000001,0.139,-0.8654,1,0,0,0,0,1,37.0,0,0,0,1,15,11,1,1,10,0,18,9,6,1,1,38,42,17,3,6,11,1,4,2,0,1,3,5,0,0,23,11,0,0,7,2,0,1,8,5,0,2,1,12,27,6,34,36,5,23,0,1,1,0,12,15,0,7,8,152,50,2,0.09901583795250304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4119455458494073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185971314857752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814815979387494,0.0,0.0925664423299773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10208098115817618,0.0,0.0,0.20552561441990175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082715027174498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13079805425403976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019614828549924,0.07073693441756808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10346337720436227,0.0,0.05627298252928853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886987421128219,0.0,0.40647526323683597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19910468704582926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695409619180353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20621951651973944,0.05441651505082532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967482738808613,0.0,0.17486559793261064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609384070387818,0.0,0.19894943571293355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504015672448302,0.0,0.11596615270059725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07636711836175611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0950083669873438,0.0,0.0,0.10544863589205017,0.06709569434664364,0.07530600658741952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072245034795913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10868965617376172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254034018312032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16911796919618108,0.0,0.07874136854456219,0.0,0.0,0.07890280322438938,0.09014030009716094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389579817861678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814835218568205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654420667020757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19734516904222424,0.06344535087565993,0.0,0.07860751515786099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17520631990886204,0.07859416335880688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082582750344143,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ime1em,2020/04/14,"is it normal to have suicidal thoughts when you're exhausted? Whenever i'm very tired, i would get more emotional and have sad/depression thoughts and scenarios, such as committing suicide. This tends to happen in the night.  I've have this for long time and not sure if my hypothesis is right.

do ""normal"" people experience this or only sad/depressed  ones? ",6.091406249999999,8.255146578125,6.180125,73.55237500000003,67.59375,10.745,33.1125,10.793553405168565,4.168284999999999,287,13,48,9,5,91,51,64,0.239,0.716,0.045,-0.9415,0,0,0,0,0,1,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,2,13,13,7,2,4,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,2,0,2,1,5,10,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,2,4,29,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34426157890529496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2248047130766679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19549196313801398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441354470142328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17672697968523662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768612460035522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875459889187008,0.39162176654129577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13542375032082235,0.15199517544396732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855104973839968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17067108298234504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43720763038863975,0.0,0.18835656330718484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3173176642626381,0.1165343298832066,0.2296985459123977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16489744562826725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196793472796454,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,inomentalhealth,2020/04/14,"I wrote this piece. I hope it helps someone. you want to be you 

we want to understand you

you’re free to share what you like

try to find out what you want to share

to yourself

to others around you

to the world 

you are you

but you need to know you 

ask yourself the right questions 

take as much time as you need to 

move forward 

why not 

always check in

on yourself 

when you need to 

find out 

how much you need to 

what you need 

who you need

why

why they make you feel the way you do 

what you feel towards them 

why you feel that way 

dive deeper 

find comfort 

closure

don’t be afraid to change 

it’s you

​

​

​

​

if none of this hit you, maybe try reading again if you feel like it

​

On another note, I recently started a twitter account with the same name as this account if anyone feels they want to follow my content.",3.3885548172757467,5.105221941860466,3.1281727574750846,94.51732558139535,73.76744186046511,5.611960132890366,25.657807308970103,5.773587663045528,0.5133574750830565,682,23,144,3,14,203,88,172,0.0,0.873,0.127,0.9354,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,1,22,3,0,4,8,0,1,5,0,5,0,0,2,0,37,30,9,0,14,5,0,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,13,5,0,0,11,1,4,3,3,1,0,0,1,5,30,8,26,26,5,19,0,0,0,0,34,10,0,5,8,92,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06201658568951687,0.4037768960684323,0.4528226243600249,0.0,0.07815328929291547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052114499838955636,0.0,0.0,0.06634927213220608,0.06967734887015065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07884496203783924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18842806600357795,0.05324566801269078,0.0,0.0,0.20436266374213466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04995722132764616,0.0,0.0,0.0740270824547292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040960832112116985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282513038311463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049750681575032214,0.0,0.07487740098228035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07921570933479839,0.10957917571929876,0.3315871538266483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349288540751525,0.0,0.07455215866520191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359134777860295,0.0,0.0,0.06364991158398227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315071262642816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05275412560548584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056038780295801935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04346020230229637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120465658552964,0.0,0.0,0.07759042932145621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758435932685945,0.11832004777687648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690141103566273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4528226243600249,0.0
mentalhealth,lxregan,2020/04/14,"How do I get help now? Tonight I had the worst panic attack of my life. The past few months, I have been suicidal off and on but I never really thought of how I would do it. Tonight was different. I started writing letters and planning things out in the midst of my attack. I’m fine now, but I think I need help. I want to tell my mom but I don’t want to worry her and I don’t know how to have that conversation with her. I have therapists but I haven’t gone consistently since December and now I don’t know when I’ll be able to go again. I don’t want this to happen again and I want to get out of this headspace.",-0.10441102756892208,1.9501713909774447,1.974766917293234,96.69698746867172,86.96992481203007,5.651929824561403,19.392982456140352,7.0316486544052195,0.13916080200501302,477,14,116,7,15,159,69,133,0.13699999999999998,0.758,0.105,-0.7964,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,9,5,2,1,3,0,15,1,0,3,1,27,31,13,1,6,4,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,8,0,0,4,0,0,2,6,4,0,0,5,0,21,1,16,24,2,19,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,0,12,81,26,0,0.17705504110106002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4028513394961949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18498483370607516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18500790259594785,0.0,0.10062446009275576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15656918811241458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23735252377990454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946096403995896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250592116693159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20736472424325933,0.1413236446032426,0.0,0.0,0.13128406952015634,0.13655576279419282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2077359420923676,0.0,0.0,0.16901907092645554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1134259930827762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14646175963510724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253204693886256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19366947776853904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547539099391612,0.0,0.0,0.20557454923443133,0.11762750195117773,0.11344972116834133,0.0,0.1405619253942338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4177266023173598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17980798869434475,0.0,0.12577482124089362,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,funfox69,2020/04/14,An interesting title How can I feel happy with out feeling extremely sad after,3.937857142857141,7.2717499285714275,6.52571428571429,60.744285714285716,85.42857142857143,8.514285714285714,28.42857142857143,8.841846274778883,3.9704,65,3,8,2,2,23,14,14,0.16699999999999998,0.444,0.389,0.5434,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,3,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,2,3,3,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,7,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6887378015314898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7250105107800647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwRA10112,2020/04/14,"My Friend is an Attention seeker I know how much its hated when  people say others are faking depression, but in this case my friend ACTUALLY is.
She uses it so she can post 'quirky' or 'relatable' things on the status. And to be quite blatant the only reason she has been doing it is to try get attention from her ex again.

I've spoken to her parents about whether she had ever shown any signs or if she's ever been diagnosed and they gave out a flat no. She has a concentration disorder, which isn't even to the extent of ADD or ADHD. 

I really want to talk to her about this because she also often messages me and is like
Life sucks or life is sad, and then when I ask why she is just like 'just'.

Its really frustrating as I have bipolar disorder and actually deal with clinical depression during depressive episodes. The way she acts about it I honestly feel is part of the reason serious cases get shunned and not taken seriously. I feel that she is making a mockery of what depression really is and it is quite insulting to me. 

Am I in the right or am I being mean about this? If I am in the right, what is a decent way to address this with hrr and ask her to stop?",4.867820512820511,5.394810824786326,6.277760683760687,77.83946153846155,68.95726495726495,10.000683760683762,27.993162393162393,10.047579312681364,2.6305849572649573,919,29,181,22,15,313,131,234,0.201,0.723,0.076,-0.9879,1,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,2,16,17,4,0,12,0,26,5,0,5,3,42,41,24,0,3,12,2,2,2,2,0,5,1,1,0,16,12,0,1,8,0,0,1,3,12,0,0,5,3,28,5,25,34,3,18,0,5,0,0,27,7,1,8,9,141,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.2314548626880624,0.0,0.14252299427907306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09483695228431104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08064575314180984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217326207157974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07229179940734923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222618203082446,0.4085680377112477,0.12036707984724428,0.0,0.0,0.271830468202747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07832804908632378,0.214544183107374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199260579481696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18324578512958936,0.0,0.12391750832256472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708377957619845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517435578558813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16752825890568487,0.11587486662207973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07916022342201075,0.0,0.0,0.12918005516360045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08717782106419161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09019358298737444,0.0,0.0,0.13168095522085604,0.12842218823062845,0.0,0.08221587011605491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11357712388109042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522716469605681,0.0,0.0,0.2279167469812385,0.2438620134371127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20255164601836936,0.0,0.0943080967933021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09914714824081547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09531872492676187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878640181025877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0805153112784587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242430185776837,0.0,0.0,0.06994787654053418,0.18826357993095424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10700967507041778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,technicalLove_8,2020/04/14,"I cannot do this anymore *Rant* I feel like dying all the time and every time something starts to look brighter something else happens and I'm back to square one. I'm so tired of trying, what's the point. I just want to die. And what whatever reason I just cannot (and this is something that's been happening for years). Like I'm always standing on the edge of a cliff (not literally) and I want to jump down but for whatever reason, I cannot.  I really want to cut myself right now but I'm also trying to stop but if I don't I just feel worse. I cannot do this anymore... literally all I want to do is scream and stab myself. I hate it and no matter what I try to do I cannot stop it. My grades are terrible (college student) and again, just as I was starting to get myself together, I was thrown back home and I'm stuck here (my parents are physically and emotionally abusive though no physical incidents have happened yet.... also terrified that something will happen and I cannot even get away). I cannot do this anymore. I wish I could die but I also don't want to and I hate this. I hate myself, I hate everything. I deserve to die and I'm literally a failure in every way possible. I really really cannot do this anymore",0.9754761904761936,3.2644873412698416,3.2787301587301587,87.5857142857143,84.3174603174603,6.457142857142857,22.492063492063494,7.7094869923839395,1.1796015873015877,958,34,199,18,28,328,110,252,0.294,0.634,0.07200000000000001,-0.9973,1,0,4,0,0,2,35.0,0,0,0,0,16,9,5,0,5,0,26,1,0,2,2,39,54,24,4,8,10,1,2,2,0,1,1,1,1,0,13,13,0,2,4,0,0,1,13,7,0,1,4,5,32,2,20,48,2,21,0,0,2,0,1,6,0,1,14,136,45,3,0.0,0.1035824042745844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209737325170038,0.07274325167459454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34680198814602425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08213713899120316,0.13444635872160496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980045155325945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36292664518305057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07303101222540008,0.09833953046199853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05774231494316918,0.0,0.14731592862997395,0.0,0.07857049271903807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08840777076299032,0.06245527685481402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135021076100877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30923280858949365,0.0,0.0,0.3452499355664855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08769277359398919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542129059177715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341361719749484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05924034170676287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707331252435883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264334748653393,0.0985567201616089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16801695865690994,0.17977158051061054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465908491963262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692111420148893,0.0,0.0,0.12375743014958372,0.0,0.0,0.14617971279046807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08589302245920583,0.0,0.10195454647349728,0.100480309525919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17806419982952745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25782285936664845,0.06939260617049965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053256723653292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08909188832198993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05629778747058305
mentalhealth,mb_does_stuff,2020/04/14,"How do I get out of this mindset? Kind of a rant, kind of want advice. TW: Self harm Again, trigger warning for self harm. I'm not trying to be gratuitous, but it helps describe context.

Hi, Reddit. I (14f) have been struggling with self harm for a while. It's really gotten worse in the past month and I don't really know how to stop. 

Last year, I cut myself once with a paper clip- I feel like that's really not serious but I still have a scar- and I told myself I would never cut myself again. Then, about a month ago, I thought to myself that I can ""get away with cutting"" if I pretended it was an accident. I don't know what I was thinking. I think I  just wanted to see if I had the ""guts."" Well, I kind of got tunnel vision and decided to try to cut my legs with my razor. I immediately told my mom. 

After that, I think the next day, I decided that I was going to scratch my leg until it bled. I knew it was sort of possible because a couple months ago, I had a really bad itch on my arm that I scratched too much. That was actually an accident. Anyways, I sat down and put on music and scratched myself. It hurt like hell, but I was going to ""keep pushing myself until it got deep enough."" Afterwards, it felt kind of surreal. I didn't know why I did it, and I didn't really believe that it was possible. I immediately clipped my nails- I used my nails- and went to my mom.

Same thing happened on Friday night. This time, I got into a *super* minor argument with my mom and I feel like I started spiraling. I went to my room and scratched my arm. My nails had grown out long enough for it to ""work."" This time, it wasn't out of curiosity. I *really* hated myself that night and I cried some while I scratched myself. Afterwards, still crying, I called my best friend. She always makes me feel better and after I hung up, I went to see my mom again. 

Today I had a meeting with my therapist (over Facetime) and we tried to figure out coping strategies. None of them that she suggested would work, though because once I start thinking about cutting, I can't stop. It's pretty rare, but it's been getting more and more frequent. I'm honestly kind of scared. I need a way to stop myself before I start spiraling, but I can't figure anything out. 

If you can, I would really appreciate some advice. If not, thanks for reading my post. Stay safe everyone.",1.50785195434106,3.7501127288135616,3.3917346938775523,87.90234866828091,81.66949152542372,6.4801798685575935,21.285195434105844,7.6729893032291185,0.9336516257350396,1816,55,373,31,49,609,208,472,0.185,0.721,0.095,-0.9927,0,0,0,0,0,2,84.0,1,1,1,5,15,31,7,2,15,0,30,6,6,5,1,77,74,30,0,10,13,4,9,3,1,3,1,0,1,3,28,26,0,5,17,2,0,8,12,15,1,0,30,11,79,16,53,40,10,65,1,1,2,0,20,16,1,7,41,256,107,4,0.0,0.0,0.06565198909176624,0.0,0.0,0.1314832935644774,0.11927280690598535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05597929232124933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05536268368202242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320832253399919,0.0,0.056172921770071715,0.08202204733994957,0.0,0.05724719797868901,0.0757973808151738,0.07060235313303262,0.05950044287032245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06869665041606159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744399746974335,0.1477997693112999,0.04338766440212798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13902885694992334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06428541220651851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10205079500329513,0.09612444095020392,0.06459582294498684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051977522298391664,0.0,0.10544731024687347,0.0,0.07646937248223512,0.0,0.16142107025553604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05949223257433073,0.0,0.0,0.06642144330248112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04509390294813313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0720206980328505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059798289383600926,0.0,0.3502897019374888,0.1109199274209678,0.05483918464296738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860344333835,0.0,0.0,0.05953743112324701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04490746976966989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31517287791093185,0.16109796380150315,0.0,0.049455840253949016,0.049884543002100726,0.05188764978256341,0.0,0.07154913554462614,0.12626854836773144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14329418227611973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422286529220811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15168789739645694,0.06443212306293115,0.06844420944504137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0676312891076109,0.0,0.0,0.06729453156278735,0.0,0.30169255836767833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06735533840915009,0.0,0.107221042469501,0.0,0.21055164017187614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285558865846693,0.07170761172547922,0.1074539211107594,0.16873806199245958,0.0,0.07033182280860234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061939001784025866,0.0,0.07811299938297532,0.044695401359510084,0.17243181186821946,0.06609864835446701,0.05340988771459573,0.07845873299768348,0.0,0.06377009028638944,0.12857082441303702,0.0,0.13702862691368725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05810514473710213,0.0,0.0,0.07936263985640102,0.0534008158327682,0.0,0.0,0.06048949630652359,0.187097483625084,0.060706419721281275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09795593263688962,0.0,0.06856032339795143,0.143373514434124,0.0,0.0,0.04332374796707083
mentalhealth,necronyx_,2020/04/14,"Confused. Thoughts Writing here because I dont know where else to go. Im am stuck between inaction so someone think for me. 

If one voice said that you dying would save the world, another voice says it would destroy the world, and were aware of people transmitting codes and scatter to you and may be ablr to give the truth but also may want to study and hurt you, because a third person says they studied on him, who do you believe? What do you do? I dropped out of my course because there is nothing to focus on. Everything is just talking at me or around me and I'm so fucking confused. Im tired and sore and this situation just stresses me to the point suicide does nt sound unpeaceful but the consequences could hurt people. I dont want my mum to die. What do i do. At this point, if the Americans find this post and use it as an opportunity to locate and take me nmthat is inaction taken from me and fine, I don't care I don't know, I'm just scared and confused 😞",2.3738321995464844,4.401416020408167,3.4066666666666663,90.03277777777781,77.57142857142857,6.396371882086169,26.19501133786848,7.3871296695380915,1.2486834467120185,764,30,160,10,18,245,113,196,0.25,0.6940000000000001,0.055,-0.9937,0,0,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,5,1,1,10,14,2,5,8,0,20,3,0,3,1,42,37,20,3,7,8,1,0,0,0,4,2,6,0,1,9,13,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,9,0,2,5,6,21,5,20,26,0,14,0,2,0,1,16,11,1,8,0,105,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367229132139257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359378340841157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540622830224585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370802616844393,0.0,0.0,0.1460588013543689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321756385543618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10350622248940576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2690897067835392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344799519597976,0.0,0.3038719725164322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829678077742727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11651120758543612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848773151716215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198492010427721,0.0,0.1243615774510736,0.07367685245160945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2775625414559776,0.0,0.2800648129896938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424924491337826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12439215270936865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08784676678445195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17975077082529714,0.11319580699220845,0.0,0.0,0.2451015866475724,0.0,0.12415836222938405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12331641154866567,0.2061883316412466,0.1297912920876142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457197096299325,0.0,0.0,0.10984273564136786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14850107926535958,0.0,0.0,0.14180406557987751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974724223004326,0.10419894757231367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306746053088017,0.0,0.10291891482487237,0.0,0.14900100274649966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11196650466745807,0.0,0.0,0.1529289261064267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18418370519753996,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,allui2006,2020/04/14,"Help for my parents to cope with the COVID quarantine This reddit is always so supportive , and even if I don't post that much I'm seeking help. My home country issued mandatory curfews and stay at home orders, anyone caught a few blocks from their house is jailed and has to pay a hefty ticket. (unless you're going to the supermarket)

For some reason my parents got stuck with my grandparents thinking this would be a momentary thing. I'm really worried for them as my grandparents are very mentally abusing and the reason i stopped talking to them years ago. For example, as the stay at home order is mandatory the maid hasn't been able to go to my grandparents, so my grandma is using her 60 year old daughter and my mom and 70 year old dad as the maids. Making them clean their house, to cook for them, do the shopping and tend to their needs. And as they're getting more cranky because the curfew has already being on for a month, they're getting more and more abusive with yelling and verbal abuse.

It is really painful to hear them suffering like this everyday. And as I live in another country, there's nothing I can do but hear them and say ""This will pass"". And it's even more painful and It makes me  more angry that the only way they can cope with it, it's to go to the supermarket for a few hours risking their lives.

Is there anything I can do or say to ease their quarantine? Any tips to give to them? that would mean the world to me! Thank you so much!",6.589895833333332,6.299439864583337,6.38486111111111,81.34625000000003,65.28472222222223,9.7,32.236111111111114,9.188382445141503,2.567586111111112,1163,41,231,18,16,365,146,288,0.115,0.8240000000000001,0.061,-0.9455,5,2,0,0,2,0,27.0,0,1,13,0,7,7,0,1,16,0,23,3,0,5,0,35,45,26,0,4,4,5,0,1,0,3,2,5,6,0,13,18,1,2,4,3,2,5,2,4,0,0,4,5,30,3,37,36,10,26,0,1,0,0,28,5,0,3,11,153,43,1,0.09781788839140322,0.34769460733300045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670965606532104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10794447223579663,0.0,0.08139231916930792,0.0,0.0,0.06651951842447465,0.10257058487719184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839654194245869,0.0,0.08049578752188195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596288768505842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12921558548008966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221161880010247,0.0938358318076022,0.1667764805608711,0.0,0.07823390118076819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204957388093917,0.0,0.13113053735232838,0.0,0.2943579529190853,0.0,0.09633091615241028,0.2257374198451731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10209646159537067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0477888792956469,0.0,0.17274997511280166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305884001392265,0.0,0.0,0.10655235675485103,0.0,0.0,0.09857742448564837,0.0,0.0,0.1145631286531034,0.078077305276927,0.0,0.14381480607634406,0.07253072479626219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938589020745902,0.0,0.20528683825367544,0.0,0.0,0.07439491196452845,0.20817025984475174,0.0,0.2172303781840428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09368249771716974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532928814743194,0.20114616162533688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15557742194280194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085217078820962,0.0,0.08178013469031427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100258055214267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07862231341325251,0.0,0.09005756938302885,0.0,0.0,0.06498585855599782,0.06267775316799036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448324888926538,0.0,0.08071000224091295,0.0,0.07764328675716811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993388138547658,0.0,0.1389740427618558,0.0,0.0,0.18897453911584852
mentalhealth,shizaruchan,2020/04/14,"I’m starting to lose it in this quarantine Hi everyone, this would be my first venting here on Reddit because I’m basically not feeling okay for the past days. 

I thought I’m surviving this coronavirus quarantine just fine, but something snapped and I’ve been feeling shit for almost 2 weeks now (after a month of quarantine). Every time I get up, I worry about my job, my life, and how I will survive because no one knows how long this will be. 

I know I’m fucked already. It’s like waiting for that time bomb and boom. I feel like giving up early on is the easiest option out too.",5.583329192546586,5.866505991304351,6.2084472049689445,79.81217391304348,67.34782608695653,9.354037267080745,33.81987577639751,9.23628265651192,2.9429006211180115,459,20,89,8,7,150,80,115,0.214,0.6609999999999999,0.125,-0.9113,1,3,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,4,7,7,2,0,3,1,7,3,1,2,0,19,22,6,0,1,3,0,3,2,0,3,1,1,0,0,7,4,0,1,6,0,0,0,2,3,0,2,2,4,9,4,13,15,0,18,0,1,0,1,2,6,2,2,14,53,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.198945267623009,0.0,0.21924385383777492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24222203305015186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812955323126174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16739305870060067,0.1898433865664531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3013695931976918,0.1419341400749652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689936635976284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18367271655024928,0.10379998506908564,0.1905880770682907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19715522653112186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2183742152019832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033070070933215,0.19412606964215348,0.0,0.0,0.17582196588541216,0.0,0.22226757136862402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15858124970761814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346279671042461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18965867719578244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20393801006412604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15295045456810516,0.0,0.0,0.14062386167146418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15772651386755376,0.23169909108062034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15936586504756473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20176507359836532,0.0,0.14113369627657868,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,heyreddits11,2020/04/14,"Increased Anxiety and Medication Interactions I'm so anxious lately, i'm now it's causing ""Anxiety Induced IBS"" &

Here are the meds prescribed by my doctors. The ones in bold I have been on for years and have been mostly stable overcoming Anxiety and Depression. Last July I started Strattera because I couldn't focus at work, and two weeks ago started the Amitriptyline because my anxiety causes severe stomach pains and ""Anxiety Induced IBS"". Recently I've relied on cannabis to help calm me down and ease my stomach paint.. but I know this is not a long term solution. **Does anyone take any combo of these medicines?**

At night:

* **Lexapro 20 mg**
* Amitriptyline 10 mg
* **yaz (birth control)**

Day:

* Atomoxine/Straterra 20 mg
* **Wellbutrin 300 mg**
* Omazorapole (acid reflux)",2.423657530924085,4.403278578947372,3.1178122726170265,80.35099927237451,112.8345864661654,5.62590346834829,30.606112054329373,6.828538100315305,2.9340712587921423,613,35,90,13,31,192,99,133,0.128,0.795,0.077,-0.5928,0,0,0,0,0,0,44.0,0,0,0,2,3,4,0,0,4,0,7,5,2,5,0,16,13,8,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,2,2,0,2,2,1,8,2,10,10,3,21,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,1,14,46,11,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13316815235095136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16277209085297453,0.0,0.10216026410241023,0.0,0.5746204521942716,0.16971499984901148,0.0,0.10504298518737124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18315531896407852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086512956503408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16849359582769555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0968847007651764,0.0,0.12939124817579906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15376483292509602,0.13146562854911034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10069473325347994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256143864205852,0.12245595764494682,0.16946384784184518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13294714703334382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1668695600496789,0.1513390127094335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14097890141397962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10179845303898627,0.0,0.15985329740588214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14833213171985776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16971499984901148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126644542948306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1129528401255062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1467510312555983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12050392558107842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10936785089120124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09674197529770033
mentalhealth,lavender4444,2020/04/14,"Something that may help some people... So, I'm trying to word this in a way that makes the most sense to the most people, but if it doesn't make sense, I'm sorry.  

If things have begun or start coming up for you during these times, like weird thoughts, intense emotions, past wounds that resurface and won't go away, please know that it's happening to a lot of people.

Try to not blame Covid 19, the government, or any outside force for your fears and anger. Instead, look within yourself, do what you feel compelled to do to heal those emotions, and let them go.

Trust yourself. There's people sending you so much love while you do this. You're supported, whether you physically have the support of someone else right now or not.

This time of ""holding"" is precious, and is the perfect time to practice taking off the masks we're all so used to wearing.

I love you, friends!",6.267664670658682,6.580662982035933,5.408029940119762,86.03420059880241,65.88622754491018,7.6380838323353295,31.67005988023952,6.742157984588678,1.6984974850299397,686,25,134,4,10,205,110,167,0.073,0.6859999999999999,0.24,0.9888,0,0,1,1,0,0,29.0,0,7,1,1,6,12,1,1,8,0,11,5,1,4,2,30,30,15,0,2,9,0,1,1,1,2,2,0,0,0,13,5,0,1,3,0,0,4,4,3,0,0,1,2,9,9,18,26,6,19,0,0,1,2,13,6,0,10,9,85,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984092898047528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359619189329846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246567863962089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208885126233468,0.3255635984597413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284150936498562,0.07317085979103144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180432243349077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644866088115761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12796856138782345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09699756821909193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07953006595479198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479780762857031,0.0,0.07069909379138456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12152184009053403,0.0,0.0,0.1230291767533217,0.2612169042627128,0.0,0.19319309608398832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10638015175538336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13814421352198356,0.4013010021531403,0.0,0.0,0.1588505900465934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12358346755346628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226142165892726,0.11140655711907828,0.0,0.16199351184555566,0.10242807268435714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3284354841213659,0.0,0.0,0.10880559947493912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0961403861501027,0.0,0.0,0.11488535896148275,0.25314862349838096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965002320057422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498491751755995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11486584522638968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lizthefangirl,2020/04/14,"1143 days does anybody else just wish they could just like stop for a couple years. I know that june 2023 a major issue I have will stop. I wish so much that it was that date think of the daily countdown everyday since it was 2016. Things won't be perfect nothing is but it will be so much better. I played out every scenario in my head no matter what I do the earliest date it will be better is October 2022. I will wait for that, it will get better, I know it will but I'm not sure that I can wait for that day.",1.2611926605504564,3.0082579174311985,2.6261376146789,95.64856422018349,79.91743119266056,5.460917431192661,18.239449541284404,6.2581,-0.32802458715596305,399,8,92,3,10,129,67,109,0.08900000000000001,0.716,0.195,0.9254,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,4,4,7,0,0,4,0,18,1,1,0,2,19,27,4,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,7,0,0,0,0,14,1,0,4,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,10,7,6,14,3,11,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,10,62,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4795801240511549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14431539033818974,0.1999981321011105,0.0,0.2331395697520198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15817688363101706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.150994711374608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229096137756168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443521517473097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855032185502524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18865763858399667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19867262974543656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830606837505907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657463469724079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1734359697562885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14951953502459764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022327483767654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17035617971165742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12008328618789345,0.11581828321619173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4157106826556929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11639806037349695
mentalhealth,Unhappywith,2020/04/14,"Anyone not really affected by this quarantine? Because your life has always been like this? And by *like this* I mean.. life for you has always been staying in your house for countless hours hardly seeing the light of day? I finished high school three years ago now, and I’ve never really worked, so those whole three years has only been me letting my anxiety scare me into staying inside, not having any real life friends. Everyone’s talking about how frustrated this quarantine is but.. for three years this was how I’ve been living? Only difference is now I have an excuse for my behavior.",4.598055555555553,7.211202694444445,4.901629629629628,79.15633333333334,72.98148148148148,8.023703703703704,25.61481481481481,8.841846274778883,2.31251925925926,473,16,77,10,10,149,70,108,0.07400000000000001,0.8420000000000001,0.084,-0.4018,0,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,3,0,1,6,5,1,1,2,0,13,3,0,3,1,12,15,6,0,0,3,0,1,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,3,5,3,10,3,10,9,1,15,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,0,12,56,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13952502658358262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619377359135667,0.0,0.0,0.10703695525571197,0.0,0.12041007170631254,0.0,0.0,0.11005728503360246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0959491826545758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150955923889947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16444881970188396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504018238477619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160634713909675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099890095611853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663010547913746,0.0,0.0,0.15500665377868314,0.1816177167228077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16095149920952034,0.33352744665345496,0.1537947434389946,0.0,0.13898650948268898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17145403503347326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213960818575904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2394185962798558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17915491907170905,0.20166810772837984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1575842075971346,0.15929654505559707,0.1254269031554572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3355335282795509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265116351145823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17573075289510826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11458860120525766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30408006201634824
mentalhealth,freakonomics101,2020/04/14,"Struggling with abandonment/attachment/isolation issues Did anyone here grow up from lack of attention from parents or loved ones? Abandonment? I need thoughts on this one cause I can’t think or process anything. 

To sum it up: my mind wants and kind of craves attention from others because I had a lot of issues with lack of growing up. But... I get scared and push it away. Wtf do I do? Basically my mind and heart just wants to feel love and appreciation from others. Like front and center. But my mind is scared to death of it. I don’t know how to fight this.

- BPD, social and generalized anxiety, bipolar II, PTSD",2.7648143236074247,5.5179282931034495,3.4537931034482767,86.19359416445623,80.72413793103449,7.017506631299736,24.440318302387272,8.139509932561175,1.6759901856763937,486,18,93,10,13,153,74,116,0.21600000000000005,0.6679999999999999,0.11599999999999999,-0.9107,1,1,0,0,1,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,4,9,1,3,1,0,7,4,1,2,0,32,17,11,1,5,5,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,8,0,1,6,0,0,4,2,5,0,2,3,1,9,4,20,14,3,10,0,1,0,2,5,6,0,3,1,62,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053663835749062,0.0,0.0,0.11017296955905002,0.0,0.12966240246094612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480373134069374,0.0,0.0,0.0960500377289045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984473458829668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16186244964092372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07966949560692121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08232110313499946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18671504297576344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32891342269603474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16407948925096014,0.08659349170282776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697820086181914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339559557570388,0.284416761891905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47728658459446505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683230040777665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21353996838183906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17495706042496995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18418481572676496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31549969820326473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061746784052558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16472093670889426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10096115966821964,0.0,0.12508884858290656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18587159915380536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_confused_raspberry_,2020/04/14,Mental hospital tips & tricks? I am considering asking my therapist to admit me to a mental hospital. Got any advice?,3.6014285714285705,6.851760571428571,6.8066666666666675,58.73000000000002,86.14285714285714,10.41904761904762,26.04761904761905,9.725611199111238,4.5830190476190475,96,4,12,4,3,35,18,21,0.073,0.823,0.105,0.168,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3167849067586821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3512488531755573,0.0,0.2204534906324692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030645032102796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592763298591516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6533943071188567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3763979218248325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RomeoIsHeldForRansom,2020/04/14,"QUESTION ABOUT GETTING HELP?? I have verrrry strong reasons to believe I’m a paranoid schizophrenic... the past year or two I’ve felt myself getting worse and worse mentally in every aspect and lately I’ve been trying to figure it out more than ever. I never considered schizophrenia but after reading symptoms and showing just about everyone and reading about people who have been diagnosed, I say it’s at least worth getting checked out. My parents are total mental health is bullshit type of people so I don’t really have them to help or guide me. I’m 18 so I don’t have to worry about doctors calling them or anything and if I was to be diagnosed they’d definitely come around otherwise they’d think I’m just making up bullshit before hand. I just don’t know who I’d make an appointment with, how I’d even approach this diagnosis. Like would I just walk in and be like “what’s up I think I’m schizophrenic”? Or is that not something typically able to be self diagnosed and I would just look stupid. Additionally my mom works in my regular doctors office so I can’t really make an appointment there for obvious reasons...any help would be appreciated so much I really don’t want to bring this up to them.",3.8676888341543503,6.20627356034483,5.045295566502464,78.5673563218391,74.17241379310343,8.039737274220034,29.15106732348111,8.841846274778883,2.6614722495894902,974,42,171,21,21,321,129,232,0.10099999999999999,0.755,0.14400000000000002,0.8616,1,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,5,2,18,4,1,0,4,0,24,10,1,5,4,44,42,18,0,5,12,2,2,2,0,3,9,1,0,1,8,13,0,0,7,3,2,4,7,1,0,1,4,4,22,3,27,29,4,20,0,0,1,0,16,10,0,6,8,116,30,6,0.11398943832173518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775167269231767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09380359520919153,0.101474767270675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969966162929554,0.1284270623284888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163959613097314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09819180779952144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3470906413132041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333460405367403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528894895150927,0.10310997298051336,0.09604101811022367,0.10892179322648034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944773671988296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17866433034762197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12116544254955973,0.0,0.0,0.2292141531384697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06264561422027558,0.0,0.12858505145737148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113789634701364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572241921661467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22826650566675905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22974908645257305,0.0,0.0,0.13350305248150948,0.0,0.0,0.08379535295934923,0.0,0.08791568205969004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12657178151574866,0.0,0.10881581705189212,0.15805184784698925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12769425862883302,0.0,0.22804057096522856,0.0,0.2190736591658661,0.1172001275088872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906489765544876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11891584434232355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775463864016014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11847867219269155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607965876956072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739134615721174,0.0,0.1113511179271354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06723392408666867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08298566870588131,0.11576180779473193,0.2323299520800168,0.2429244794010038,0.0,0.0,0.07340546098865866
mentalhealth,onlinecloudy,2020/04/14,"Angry I’m not typically an angry person. I’m a people pleaser and generally a nice person. However, things have taken a turn these last few days especially. Everything feels so fucked up right now. My great grandma (last grandma figure in my life) passed away a few days ago. I can’t go see my grandpa who is on his last days due to cancer because he is being quarantined. I’m behind on my schoolwork because I can’t stay motivated. My wedding is probably going to be postponed and throughout the whole wedding planning process, it has been ruined by toxic family members. So, in my head, the longer it’s postponed, the more shit I’ll have to deal with. I hate my current job as a fast food worker because every fucking day I deal with shitty people and after a while, it really gets to me. They talk about me in front of me, literally. I have a lot on my plate, I’m not sure what to do. I feel like I’m drowning. I have been thinking that maybe everyone would be better off without me.",3.4312884615384616,5.200466497435901,5.077996794871794,80.36314903846154,73.76923076923076,7.336538461538463,28.08493589743589,8.07648339933343,2.0006474358974367,777,31,144,12,16,263,123,195,0.159,0.742,0.099,-0.9256,3,1,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,1,4,4,10,4,0,11,0,17,7,2,1,1,17,34,7,1,1,3,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,0,2,8,5,1,0,5,0,0,4,5,5,0,0,3,3,21,5,23,27,5,29,0,1,1,2,12,10,3,1,15,94,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738488080223207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441564173485048,0.0,0.0,0.24217125009251025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11711726377862795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3416071740909428,0.27304432042881155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157197598656683,0.12653572335448832,0.11901313331731045,0.0,0.12483649276531125,0.0,0.13391395985929105,0.09460292195533676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16012625524837662,0.0,0.0,0.2448456116329795,0.06918548195148347,0.0,0.15051793290861515,0.0,0.0,0.14599667729828733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307401646197479,0.13590406455053794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131409261357129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238269301910738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09353418649051497,0.06469512340777613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11258118521716023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303656777593226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836106834308916,0.23125307766886824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14277424684548568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08483347886383077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308840404835152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10552387938429446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593016901806124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14114515577122244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480698407852304,0.0,0.0,0.1064364836305871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879758680472662,0.0848512255547837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14403805206375175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14784540083582404,0.0,0.1276509173375458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406940463421586,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OGKebabEater,2020/04/14,"An Island Nation of Redditors  

Hello all,

If you are interested in joining a (hopefully) newly formed island nation then this is the place to be.

the subbreddit is reddit.com/[r/theredditnation](https://www.reddit.com/r/theredditnation/)

I have prepared a plan that explains how we will go about doing such a task. More detailed elaborations for each component of the plan will be given at request.

Obviously the first question is where we would have our island. I have identified places of interest. One place of interest is the Nation of Belize. Belize is a small nation with a low GDP of 2 Billion and they are selling off most of their island. Islands with 50-100 acres can be acquired for around 500,000; give or take 50,000. From the people (Government Officials) I have contacted, they are perfectly okay with this plan.

Now here is a 5 step proposal of how this will come to fruition (I will expand on how we will finance this)

1. Acquire the island
2. Set up the initial infrastructure  

   1. Form of Government that I propose is a constitutional monarchy (for now I will be the “king”)  

      1. Country will be run as a democracy (two chamber form of parliament)
      2. Noble titles such as Duke, Earl, Count, Lord, Baron etc will be sold off to help initially finance the island.
   2. Establishment of the Government Building  

      1. For now this is where the government will convene until more infrastructure is added and the island is improved.
      2. People will be made citizens at this location
   3. Establishment of Civil Services  

      1. Waste collection, Police, Social Services
   4. Establishment of a Port  

      1. This will allow supplies to enter the island.
      2. This will allow for the island to participate with the rest of the world economically(I will expand on this later).
      3. The port will function as the entrance point and exit until the runway can be constructed.
   5. Establishment of Resident Housing  

      1. This temporary housing will be until the island can be developed and more permanent buildings can be put up.
      2. Resident Housing and the Government building will be set up near the port until island development is completed
   6. Set up a massive solar powered crypto mining operation to help finance further development of the island  

      1. A partnership with big mining companies can be brokered to have this set up
3. Make the Island a desirable location  

   1. Set up the island as a luxury city  

      1. Free housing for citizens
      2. Free healthcare for citizens
      3. Free schooling and university for citizens
   2. Build resorts and legalize gambling on the island  

      1. The revenue generated from such activities will help finance further development of the island
      2. With the revenue generated from this, the island will be able to provide for the residents a luxury city
      3. The gambling industry investments will help to finance the island as well
   3. Make the island a banking haven  

      1. Set up a bank on the island
      2. No KYC laws will be enforced on the island
      3. This will attract forgien investment into the island
   4. Allow cryptocurrency companies to conduct business without oversight and for miners to set up large scale operations using solar powered energy
   5. No income tax,sales tax, capital gains tax or corporate on the island  

      1. Commercial businesses such as casinos, resorts, and banks will just pay slightly inflated property taxes
      2. This will help attract a lot more forgien investment as well
      3. Will attract companies to set up offices here and thus bring jobs to the island.
4. Expand on the island infrastructure  

   1. Build an airport. The islands have enough space to accommodate runways for planes even up to jumbo jets
   2. Build more free luxury housing for residents
   3. Establish schools and universities
   4. Establish libraries
   5. Establish Museums
   6. Establish a healthcare system
5. Enjoy the luxury haven of an Island that we have built

Now for the question of how much this island will cost and how we will get the funding

According to my calculations (you can look at them below) it will cost us $2,600,000

* The Island itself  

   * 500,000
* The Port  

   * 200,000 to build  

      * This will benefit us later when we receive forgien investments
   * 500,000 for 250 passenger ferry  

      * We will budget around 100,000 for operating costs
* Initial Buildings  

   * 1,000,000  

      * These buildings will be permanently built but occupied until the island is built and then will be sold off to recoup the investment.
      * Buildings include
* Civil Services  

   * Around 50,000 to purchase initial equipment and medical supplies
   * Another 100,000 to purchase ATVs
   * Another 100,000 to purchase off roading vehicles
* Bitcoin mining operation  

   * We will get the money for the operation by partnering with a large company
* Water Purification  

   * 50,000
* Food Supply  

   * We will purchase MRE’s and other preserved food products for the island
   * An exact count of this cannot be made until we move further into the plan
* Further development of the island  

   * This will be financed by the forgien investments in regards to banking, gambling and tourism along with money raised from property taxes

Now in regards to how we will raise that sum

* We will sell off noble titles (this is why we will set up a constitutional monarchy)  

   * While no price has been established yet, the titles for sale can include  

      * Duke, Duchess.
      * Marquess, Marchioness.
      * Earl, Countess.
      * Viscount, Viscountess.
      * Baron, Baroness.
* A small percentage of the island (less than 25%) will be earmarked for sale immediately. The part earmarked for sale will be part of the planned downtown district/capital and developers of this land will be allowed to build whatever structures they want and won't have the problem of jumping through hoops like zoning laws.  

   * On a 60 acre island, 15 acres would be marked for sale  

      * The acres on this haven of an island will be sold for 250,000 each so the island would raise 4.5 million and the sale of said acres will help kickstart the massive infrastructure of the island and provide the island with adequate funding.
* Once the island is set up, the island will continue to profit from digital activities which will allow it to not have to charge an income tax or corporate tax  

   * Digital activities include the solar powered bitcoin mining operation  

      * We will partner with an existing bitcoin company for this
   * Solar powered web hosting
* People can become citizens for a fee of $10 which will mainly go to the printing of their ID and filing in the government archives but the island will profit a few dollars off of this

If you have made it this far, please join the subreddit

More information to come soon, thank you",4.760506082725062,8.166090813333334,5.2443769667477715,72.0889459854015,78.64444444444446,7.942449310624495,32.30056772100568,8.715349130057279,3.6868015896188164,5275,271,753,131,137,1681,407,1125,0.009000000000000001,0.9059999999999999,0.085,0.9966,8,0,0,0,0,0,189.0,17,4,6,15,31,23,0,0,104,1,114,4,0,18,4,102,139,52,0,9,10,0,0,1,2,51,1,1,0,7,36,55,3,0,4,2,59,12,7,2,2,5,9,2,38,25,160,55,23,109,1,1,1,0,51,65,0,10,22,542,74,29,0.08155445141610036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17103390634678864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21780225692431626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09007048418124937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14050387714066312,0.08550829067141125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08426754919187153,0.09095477127458552,0.05386594600198445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06937017471242415,0.19723193274736095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08521766965812487,0.07823446112045722,0.09269854832568047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3279853781409415,0.0,0.0,0.08100197190827563,0.0,0.4705144361196663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093020897218668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03984338548744673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848519917607537,0.0,0.0,0.06933467817918715,0.0,0.23150638150216274,0.1088764592018816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215752983827627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667947526036186,0.05995190556628231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868528291087887,0.0552634069253417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17663104692072654,0.0,0.1696187638465323,0.0,0.25562113124900776,0.08952229731275657,0.07709531731649942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0780365958359627,0.0,0.08198474916380917,0.18271930039810366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07757695907816824,0.0,0.0,0.16507491763491114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313449282447162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06131879788819895,0.0,0.0,0.07508438167783836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796668487082584,0.0,0.19619992703763384,0.07043686109277571,0.0,0.0,0.04810292844819181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466544922378956,0.0,0.07359020741957252,0.0,0.0,0.07861558088773521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738018271234259,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NooneYetEveryone,2020/04/14,"Exhausted (rant) I am truly and completely exhausted.

I have been struggling with persistent depressive disorder (dysthymia) for about 12 years now (turning 23 soon), but only realized it last year.

Mental health has never been something my family talked about. Parents divorced about 10 years ago, my mother always made me feel worthless, my sister pushed me on that, I had noone to turn to. I was always told to ""suck it up"", so I did. I showed no emotions for the majority of my life.

I've always had major depressive episodes (late realization too) around Christmas, but now, thanks to an ex-colleague who really knew how to cause me pain I'm deeper in it than I've ever been.

I want to die. I'm done with life. It's way too painful for me, I can't take it anymore.

But I have to. Killing myself would cause incredible pain to my grandma, the only person who actually cares about me, and I can't do that.

I've tried different anti-depressants and I'm in therapy, but nothing helps. I've exhausted all of my options to get better, I know I never will.

I'm a zombie. The shell of a person just there to give the illusion of life, and I can't wait for it to be over.

Thank you for reading. Be stronger than me.",3.0131103074141024,5.047323282700424,4.4451838456901775,83.29392405063291,75.66666666666666,7.721036769138036,26.475587703435806,8.563005593585519,2.00842712477396,946,36,183,19,21,314,137,237,0.20800000000000002,0.7090000000000001,0.083,-0.9866,3,0,1,0,1,3,43.0,0,1,0,2,16,16,2,1,7,0,20,10,0,4,4,28,40,10,2,2,5,3,1,0,0,2,10,0,0,2,10,7,0,1,4,2,0,1,6,12,0,0,11,1,27,4,34,25,3,21,0,3,0,0,13,6,1,1,13,120,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.10623974566072206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096505169494716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27176141320701946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10796808894288508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691585866065816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628515456565456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109984763644466,0.22367544398303765,0.0,0.0,0.1141463297495302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28130429346418306,0.0,0.11298809593435055,0.11374419060962702,0.1247724911427593,0.0,0.0,0.11141005794757658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1224621718956467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847760026123824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263133387458503,0.0,0.055047078063241266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056879187648964824,0.10443638303037923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572190033573765,0.0,0.0,0.07297211929653145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12044663164060003,0.0,0.059831164503068475,0.08874218602221925,0.12280817200274988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23069067649415415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030138074120163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097136292545487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16793187204509274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044620595250973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559847921142168,0.3475306059617421,0.0,0.12088535128232775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901191814830764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10889775034226036,0.0,0.0697438136890345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08381212772413701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11381277354135777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08185540453016328,0.08750420687053298,0.0,0.2004625872588892,0.12450037647940303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040283156229877,0.0,0.07391442195401758,0.2368348723123936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06421333755419273,0.0864145804359166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733690894815308,0.0,0.0,0.2103228262585
mentalhealth,Idonthaveanyoneelse,2020/04/14,"How do I bring up the fact I want to go to a mental hospital? 1. I’m a 15 y/o female. 
2. I have C-PTSD, Depression, and a Panic Disorder. (All diagnosed by a professional child psychologist.) 
3. I’m currently taking the anti-depressant, panic relief medication, Prozac. (Provided by my physiatrist.)
4. I used to have a slight eating disorder. (It never got super serious I just my body in a distorted manner. I also still hav certain physical health effects due to it.) I’ve also been self-harming since I was about 13 or 14. (I do and did have periods of time where I wouldn’t feel the need but I eventually always got stressed and that led to me staring again.)

Alright, now that, that’s out of the way... Hi.
Before you ask, no, I do not have major suicidal thoughts or tendencies. Of course I will have the ordinary existential crisis, but it’s not as bad as it used to be. The reason I want to go to a MH facility is because of my self-harm. It’s gotten way out of control and I hate having to rely on it. I’m afraid to bring this up to my parents because I hate talking about the fact I’m hurting this bad. I also don’t want them spending any more money me, due to this subject. And even though I know my case is really bad to some people, it doesn’t seem that way to me. I feel like if I were to go to the hospital I would just be taking up a bed space that someone else truly needs. 
I just don’t know what to do, but I really need help. I can’t talk to my friends about this because it’s to uncomfortable for me to bring up.",1.1377318232379423,3.0738621442006284,3.922285367580141,85.2699464050966,81.16300940438872,7.37631712003236,23.45646678127212,8.360895534625662,1.5471093336029935,1180,42,252,26,31,419,165,319,0.131,0.738,0.131,-0.2925,3,0,0,0,0,0,54.0,0,1,1,3,16,18,2,4,16,1,25,6,1,7,5,45,57,18,1,9,11,1,2,1,1,3,4,0,1,1,18,7,1,1,8,0,2,7,9,12,0,0,8,3,35,6,41,44,4,29,0,2,1,0,10,10,0,5,10,166,53,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24565372104101516,0.08520014470481088,0.0,0.0,0.06963154082967461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09572471848265457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564845426682228,0.18725559075250706,0.0,0.08712988945517282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11373682993009142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484375848572298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763838819234836,0.1039279181904854,0.0,0.0,0.23470515939166245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10477478959022736,0.08553718271183648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763037773945094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354712895886647,0.07315040918727035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07910947490737533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1745788843734469,0.0,0.16378792911793127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20218607082053527,0.0,0.10884020513916597,0.0,0.0,0.06863264784480387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961506728106854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11254630626244716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05002461501066571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031513449498898,0.1031892310788448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22777191919050085,0.07897268948126436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402749721179269,0.11369659842878888,0.0,0.0,0.07098721871648488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196932949119082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119264317435386,0.10527825138909662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932157986582614,0.21363888283941493,0.0,0.0,0.0847015082181122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08675824046361688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08177210936499127,0.0,0.11729216564739825,0.0,0.0,0.11200259305690674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15397533215345974,0.16460109622633975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060174344960908,0.08128952641696595,0.05970685880054695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1768713584761014,0.0,0.0,0.18118418756843935,0.24382715720290116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07273787425133132,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ramerone,2020/04/14,Constant butterfly feeling I feel like a anxious butterfly feeling in my stomach that’s comes and goes. I don’t feel fatigue or pain no nausea no mental confusion more like overwhelming feeling that’s just coming and going for two days. I’ve had problems with anxiety but not where it be considers chronic just when things get hard. I’ve been busy but no worries about anything major. Just feel anxious like every 15 min . And I do get some acid like belching but I have been eating big fatty meals this last days with beans and stuff. I’m 25 with no health issues so far. Could it just be anxiety if it is I learned to not freak our from then just drink water. And when I smoke weed or talking about it I don’t feel it at all aswell. I know it’s hard to pin point just wanted to see if any of y’all have felt this ??,2.489357429718872,4.478317975903618,3.2982891566265065,91.12642971887553,77.07228915662652,6.113413654618473,24.31967871485943,7.0316486544052195,0.8705876305220883,648,22,134,7,15,205,102,166,0.17600000000000002,0.727,0.09699999999999999,-0.8658,0,0,2,0,0,0,11.0,1,1,0,0,12,10,0,2,1,0,12,9,1,0,1,41,29,16,0,5,15,0,10,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,12,10,4,0,10,1,0,3,8,6,0,1,4,12,11,4,13,22,4,17,0,2,1,0,3,6,0,6,12,82,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09371841749293627,0.0,0.2108550517635244,0.31138175591869915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11340938720059597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374295510919023,0.0,0.14892824744834784,0.0,0.1100334665040139,0.0,0.0,0.17775758343551085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13500550093090113,0.0,0.14101838558435026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11611445153793568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4877811881249101,0.09845452946044997,0.13232329447728716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14400451762459546,0.0,0.07832301557701148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2469090013683946,0.0,0.0,0.14649010583006009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14384227425233426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573910897212857,0.11233700953985386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693163298489016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13888435217422207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14664408119471106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302790140333193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13186962733792493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982011630176614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15776434724189492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076987577848472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155766559258596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13462449941343313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812864167173556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13995706298842694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sku11AndBones,2020/04/14,"For a friend Hey guys. This will be my first post in this sub. I have this friend. For this purpose, we will call him Scott. 
I worry about him. A bit of a backstory. 

Scott and I became best friends after he started frequenting a store I worked at. Scott and I became inseparable almost immediately. Hanging out constantly, families hanging out together, the works. 
I first noticed something was off when I walked into Scott’s room at his parents house (he was 24 and living at home, no biggie it happens) and all he had was a mattress on the floor and a computer. However his room always smelled so foul. Like body odor, always. 

After I realized his dad is a raging drunk, Scott wanted to know what it was like to live on his own. So he rented a room from me. Since then we have been living together, and I’ve learned a lot about him. 

Scott has no interest in activities that don’t involve computer games. He expresses desire to meet women, but when he starts to speak to one, even in a friendly regard he develops a shyness I’ve never seen, and stares downward at his feet. He is completely reliant on me at this point to give advice, read things for him (he struggles with reading) and most other things. Scott has a good job, but comes home and lives in an absolutely filthy room. He has sheets but sleeps on a vacant mattress, he wears the same clothes to bed that he wore to work, he showers once a week if I’m lucky, and his room is always filled with empty cans, and food, and it’s disgusting. 

Fast forward to quarantine, we’ve been staying inside. Scott’s computer broke, and he had to send it off to get repaired. Scott is just laying in bed, and hasn’t left for a week. Scott will not shower, will only come out to eat, and does nothing but watch anime all day, and complain about how he misses his games. 

I’ve tried really hard to introduce him to girls, how to talk to them (like they’re regular people, hello.)... and he always gets defensive and upset that they don’t respond to him like they do to me. It’s not because I’m overly attractive, I’m average, I just speak to women well, maintain good eye contact, I’m a conversationalist, etc.... I’ve tried several times just to get him to keep his hands out of his pockets, make eye contact and get into the real world.

I constantly worry about him. Every time I suggest he take a break from gaming, and sitting in his room all day or sleeping until 4 in the afternoon, he gets so defensive that he scares me. He is a very good guy, but this has been going on forever. I am afraid to say... I don’t even know what to call this, but I’m out of options and need advice. He’s coming up on 26, and has never even hugged a woman. I know he is shy, but I feel as if something else is amiss. This isn’t me trying to get him into dating, just into people! Any words?",3.5347350498338885,4.9637318107142905,4.6815697674418635,84.69389534883722,72.85714285714286,7.566445182724253,25.52325581395349,8.133680483312611,1.4888812292358802,2194,70,441,33,43,721,259,560,0.087,0.8240000000000001,0.08900000000000001,0.0757,6,1,2,0,0,0,89.0,2,0,3,6,19,28,4,4,25,0,36,12,8,3,5,82,67,42,0,5,16,2,3,4,4,4,0,3,15,6,22,38,3,3,6,6,2,10,11,11,1,3,11,13,45,17,74,51,10,80,0,2,5,1,79,43,0,8,29,268,67,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106492432497576,0.0,0.0,0.07740047688664893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572648533215601,0.0,0.0,0.052563725684285585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04711874048208594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111706699814736,0.0,0.08438688354721431,0.08585809616463007,0.0,0.0,0.1578551010572703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997502005496168,0.08104306945290278,0.1670583809443088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969866226891788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764198680066437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07909279664112223,0.0645706378790268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620513622246477,0.1531592399534896,0.0,0.06512495987334986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286750557370665,0.0,0.03908302772807273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149536361995445,0.09346626565954028,0.0,0.2388738602370281,0.0,0.2423028737853247,0.07414907743344079,0.043928926839448185,0.1944958943475132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530697882096292,0.06835233106902625,0.0,0.06924176359405236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15506777616251066,0.0,0.0,0.08918885835660494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07670405401711222,0.06870396850887235,0.0,0.0,0.1274390836107506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398200277908173,0.0,0.0,0.15105109607237255,0.0,0.2730140722262206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06571403889668923,0.0,0.0,0.05159547907928376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057313781160363925,0.11923041590009993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416730755918649,0.08800166525867803,0.0,0.08231739643461275,0.05237756585341151,0.05878686192309026,0.0,0.0,0.08582772605400009,0.0,0.0,0.1071742100560704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306941942956656,0.0,0.07402791283005161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15463323198596313,0.08797942727890856,0.04951760384335965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06146864201185308,0.0773864787215093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732213816155887,0.0,0.06393980069912114,0.0,0.15470304141669133,0.0,0.0,0.11901201033878622,0.0,0.0,0.10942058672779056,0.08238693027203617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080624695493302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05811674583834596,0.06212735468929052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027036552098199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014348699073556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15743611674072058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377704647074689,0.04559100574347245,0.0,0.12400389415152133,0.0,0.06949811595280604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688165676772949,0.15699506806239955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,h8teCh00sing,2020/04/14,"Short Rant Gonna make it short: it's like my thoughts are literally screaming at me, it kind of hurts all over my body.
They make me cry.
I feel like i will never get better.",0.3801351351351343,2.4540815405405425,1.7310135135135134,99.12733108108112,84.94594594594595,4.781081081081081,17.35810810810811,5.985473137389443,-0.6702918918918916,135,3,33,1,4,43,29,37,0.31,0.579,0.111,-0.8359,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,1,0,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,2,2,6,8,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,7,4,3,5,1,5,0,1,0,0,1,4,0,0,3,17,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2735358575980204,0.0,0.3435439133368079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.339733073411466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15638287931528036,0.2209519805486937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16158770729738353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33109406335276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220708599969675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30220029896198997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4128978765007051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2385382712688757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.245536314276962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wolfpackalpha,2020/04/14,"I'm making a Mental Health Video series, and I'm not sure if this will help anyone else here Hi! So i'm unsure if this is the correct subreddit for this type thing, but I'mma give it a shot. So Mental Health Awareness month is May here in the US and a couple of months ago I decided I wanted to try and make something about mental health. So I decided to film a couple of friends who suffer from different mental illnesses, and create a video asking them a couple of questions. The goal is to raise awareness about mental health and hear stories about how it affects people day to day. Here is a link to the promo: [https://youtu.be/1LdP3NPxsFI](https://youtu.be/1LdP3NPxsFI)  


If anyone is interested, the full video will be releasing May 1st with follow up videos released throughout the month. The goal there being if you see someone in the video and want to know more about them, everyone interviewed about their mental health has individual videos about their specific stories with it. You can find links to my social media if you'd prefer to follow it there at  [https://tanzi-media.com/](https://tanzi-media.com/)   


The main video is going to be about an hour long, so i know it might not be interesting to everyone, but if anyone is interested in the project/ if it ends up helping anyone then I'm happy.",8.959006272697257,9.297940291845492,8.365665236051504,67.00788379002975,60.24463519313305,10.087685704853088,30.79861340376361,9.661875296680813,2.775558204027732,1060,30,173,17,13,335,118,233,0.062,0.835,0.10400000000000001,0.883,1,0,1,0,0,0,47.0,1,3,4,2,17,7,0,0,18,0,19,6,0,4,2,39,36,21,0,10,11,0,0,0,1,5,6,1,0,0,11,8,0,0,9,8,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,2,13,6,30,26,3,20,0,1,1,0,19,7,0,11,10,121,24,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08022920356885467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25313905444502743,0.09273535864217726,0.0,0.0,0.08461204781649738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3004336045366139,0.0,0.11673935912112067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456079784092848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07560718180658657,0.0,0.08016254687430853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1729670846596197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08272197376835931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992566580191859,0.0,0.0,0.08682278760826329,0.051437347797940916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09634663539577673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4810247962892265,0.10200823251840102,0.0,0.12133018458068665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913139588679536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994808195625446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08009605551278341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208285652823765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5472600364412391,0.09601387435569723,0.0,0.0,0.21672603617933625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274632132230025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138881755681158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721225488550042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09226072896835473,0.07668648711579015,0.06967689183828449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530199855397587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060128985764379674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061448472000743874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886906070534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676702517481176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cloudedrose,2020/04/14,"19f sitting on my roof, feeling inadequate I really just need a friend, please",3.265000000000001,6.4317712142857175,4.84,72.83000000000003,86.85714285714286,8.514285714285714,28.42857142857143,8.841846274778883,3.503257142857142,63,3,10,2,2,21,14,14,0.15,0.445,0.40399999999999997,0.552,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2910673897111061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4447479827635397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4268393122684851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6318939907358877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3687779717507076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gipogamerz,2020/04/14,"Please, I need your help. hi i think i need help. I never talk about my emotions with anyone, I have everything repressed inside. Also, when I get angry I injure myself. And the thing that worries me the most is that I love it and I enjoy doing physical or psychological harm to others. I play with people's emotions, even my mother's only to hurt them. I have no real friends and I trust absolutely no one. I am very cold, when my grandmother died (I didn't have any more) I did nothing, nor cried. I just went on with my life. Another example is that when I harm people psychologically and they are crying, I enjoy it and I do even more harm to them. I also have to say that I don't love anyone, I don't like loving people, I find it useless.",1.601147902869755,3.7281021390728455,3.965139072847681,84.56435320088299,80.58940397350995,6.1458719646799125,20.00044150110375,7.3011,0.6096698454746137,577,15,116,8,15,200,84,151,0.249,0.568,0.183,-0.8592,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,1,3,0,9,15,0,1,2,0,14,5,0,0,1,18,22,12,1,2,2,1,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,9,8,0,1,2,1,0,1,7,6,0,1,3,2,33,9,9,19,3,6,0,2,0,3,14,1,0,2,5,89,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294458723968103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755604086288984,0.15042773018525302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200617683310342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3151627244528034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888626878745082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3227408284098201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18950469329585226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289303792156562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13111758493884287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083493305977056,0.0,0.07495063927474357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19231311896584105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357425464730035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10132829711908747,0.07008610362462435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884280697008959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21274388388944665,0.11064329225360528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13765137065041844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972105361287532,0.1091059172330433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2983661682909506,0.0,0.0,0.15747329021910275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632860778223107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11408318709964342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11530572983306694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953068095343622,0.0919217936941774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183674876660176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132986569041591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568808694382962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Meeka1631,2020/04/15,"Stopped my injection About a month ago I stopped taking my invega injection because our insurance laps and it’s over a thousand dollars for a shot.

I was happy about this because it met one last drug in my system. I still take a antipsychotic so I thought I would be fine. The shot also makes me sick for about 3 days after I take it. To the point that I can’t get out of bed. And I have lost the ability to drive because it messes up my depth perception.

Today was the hardest day I have had off of the injection. I couldn’t stop getting angry for no reason. I had two freak outs and called my husband at work where we got in a fight on the phone. 

My husband wants me to stay off the shot... I think I’m going to end up calling the doctor first thing in the morning and beg to get a sample for this month. I just don’t know what else to do. I am searching for guidance or maybe just other people who have been through this that know how it feels.",2.8529610829103227,4.0629543299492425,3.967532994923862,90.00923519458547,74.2284263959391,6.877698815566838,25.3160744500846,7.3011,0.997746125211506,741,24,162,8,15,241,118,197,0.11900000000000001,0.8390000000000001,0.040999999999999995,-0.9153,0,0,1,0,1,0,15.0,2,0,0,3,10,6,1,0,15,0,15,3,0,3,0,25,33,8,0,3,3,2,1,0,0,1,3,0,1,0,14,7,0,3,7,0,1,2,4,4,0,4,9,2,24,2,30,21,0,33,0,1,0,0,10,15,0,1,14,115,38,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12816231964892488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11562136143624073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2644056794369199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29526670153318635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18648554882451626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479847645266883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766804112794406,0.0,0.12077886070667443,0.0,0.12805583876399582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310449016792547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12298051194710725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22661279184335145,0.0,0.08216870562244738,0.0,0.11563462139624495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15390914696161218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891585642838593,0.11785279970879438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578272242177033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650893015004657,0.0,0.14525103239676054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23080632562283385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09797181719368823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10023425052700664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366757634907571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14865333246714965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15410409285439028,0.11546256135132862,0.36262853200166417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261207220913045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960531820197663,0.09264165723758548,0.0,0.1147811522049072,0.0,0.0,0.1370458683305274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123461386640612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08527761089311768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525667900155376,0.0,0.0,0.10270618348393963,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway0123612345,2020/04/15,"Iss it normal to feel stressed when talking to friends? Over the last few days I've started feeling stressed and overwhelmed when I talk to my friends for a bit. I end up having to leave the conversation and sit with my head in my hands for a few minutes. 
Does anyone else experience anything like this, and is there anything I can do to stop myself feeling like this?",6.9483802816901425,6.879859014084508,6.12404929577465,82.77086267605638,64.49295774647888,8.226760563380282,37.46830985915493,7.1686216300943375,2.5701239436619723,294,14,57,2,4,89,49,71,0.105,0.693,0.20199999999999999,0.7622,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,3,4,0,4,2,2,0,0,9,8,5,0,1,0,0,4,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,7,4,11,8,3,11,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,9,37,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203330264206692,0.19347714954639195,0.310779591290726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061518548200678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177878413010433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652451240822227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577420116270631,0.0,0.1672460353495227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18471054126768366,0.0,0.0,0.2864321439344931,0.13489914363225916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917769165414248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.193792554659847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15392045920266953,0.0,0.1999421546158304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845041688884113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1850118728895794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13365380946206745,0.0,0.0,0.15786911102551435,0.4326048993136887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3035464485922296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway_bpdsis,2020/04/15,"I keep having horrible nightmares after my parents told me they care about my bipolar toxic sister more than me Sorry for the throwaway, this has a lot of information that makes it really easy to identify me if anyone knows me.

Ever since quarantine has started, I can't sleep at all and I keep having these horrible nightmares, and I just start randomly crying. I love my parents (most of the time) but for my entire life they've completely ignored my well being in favor of my sister (who's 2 years younger than me). I wasn't allowed to go out with my friends, I had to get a job to buy things for myself, I wasn't allowed to date, and I was constantly emotionally abused to the point where I can't even take one tiny negative comment without bursting out in tears. My sister is an absolutely disgusting person who literally only gets joy from other peoples pain; she left our high school because people saw the way she treated me and other people and they hated her so much they bullied her out. She's only friends with people that live at least 10 miles away and don't know anything about her because once they see her true colors they leave. She has tried to beat me up, threatened to have me jumped and stabbed, stolen my car and then crashed it, lied to everyone who would listen about me to make me look bad, and worst of all have told my parents that I'm the reason that she has all these problems and that I make her want to kill herself (which she's tried). She sells drugs and fake pills, has a major alcohol/theft problem, has repeatedly gotten suspended from school for threatening to kill people, and is an insane pathological liar who will do and say anything to get what she wants. She refuses to see a psychiatrist and take her medications and my parents just let her do anything she wants.

I don't think I'm perfect but I'm a decent person. I have a big group of great friends who are really good people and very supportive of me, I'm at a really well known and prestigious school working really hard towards a career that I know will allow me to help people, and I try my best to be kind to everybody I meet. I had to completely move out of my family home and into an apartment because my sister was constantly abusing me and my parents said that I have to take it because if I retaliate and she kills herself, it would be my fault. In a recent manic phase, she texted me unprompted (I haven't had contact or even seen her in MONTHS) that next time she sees me she's going to beat me up. Blocked her number, called my parents, and they said they couldn't do anything about it. 

All of this has left me feeling so depressed and unloved, and I'm 99% sure I have OCD in addition but my primary care physician refuses to acknowledge any sort of problems I have because I'm 'a healthy girl'. My friends try to be there for me but they don't understand how it feels to have your family tell you that you shouldn't come home because your sister is there and that's more important. I keep up a front but every time I'm alone I think about my situation and I just cry because I can't do anything about it.

I'm not a violent person in any means either, but this whole thing has me so upset that I keep having these horrible nightmares of attacking my sister, or her killing herself. As much as I can't stand her, I obviously would never wish her dead and these dreams make me feel even worse and so guilty. I'm stuck inside now with just me and my thoughts so I can't stop thinking like this, and it's getting hard for me to cope. I was trying to reach out to a shrink/therapist but offices are closed now and I'm scared that they would just be like my PCP and ignore everything I say. I just don't know what to do.",7.9512203585887775,6.265544997300947,7.85875997686524,76.42778137651823,63.264507422402154,11.059664545980336,35.47642182379025,9.819183407551806,3.1832569192211286,2957,106,587,48,35,954,305,741,0.228,0.653,0.11900000000000001,-0.9987,9,2,2,0,1,0,58.0,1,4,9,5,29,45,9,2,21,0,60,10,1,9,10,126,125,52,5,15,20,12,5,2,4,7,8,5,2,4,40,44,0,10,17,1,2,7,18,23,2,1,17,17,122,22,80,94,16,58,0,1,7,1,86,29,0,8,22,409,162,6,0.0,0.12481292269541522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05628922586178794,0.0,0.054551218087273125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163610250847449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03682875196532093,0.0,0.21671851446748727,0.0,0.0,0.05992080792853796,0.04948609008995099,0.0,0.043978042066126974,0.2247540500137927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527491108191464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05378292754943017,0.0,0.10740308499210603,0.0,0.0,0.04537135846815423,0.11044897513163154,0.11383716761352075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11571312773691797,0.0,0.0,0.045365410903446965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06108157852893247,0.0,0.0,0.059247727929349125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436599451994633,0.047643888533880005,0.04437754592747896,0.05032934861086138,0.04733725241540948,0.0,0.09930696560908804,0.0,0.07989604268595772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16277377712259974,0.0,0.11007358705151493,0.0,0.05986822785468535,0.044177892781806304,0.0,0.0580699068451036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09436564874574696,0.05200165730395928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03530422663247403,0.0556497490975978,0.10566651207012676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05226778928674885,0.18726543702026685,0.233090403378759,0.054848687807959436,0.11578630368223755,0.0,0.0,0.055770929548892116,0.11445427966967472,0.053859613573278314,0.03720304870527672,0.051464730008154935,0.0,0.0465094126454314,0.0,0.04423033135903956,0.0,0.0,0.044778957021842716,0.047537587578968366,0.0,0.1406330689151437,0.0,0.0,0.05737410411108471,0.0,0.05306043951255078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04204144871218355,0.055980882861078086,0.07743841532781458,0.0,0.040623082669447634,0.0,0.056016151441370385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609284133167508,0.03569119794852263,0.08011725980323775,0.05604560295481493,0.0,0.35090913181854577,0.0,0.0,0.255607827381217,0.13797072227648788,0.0,0.0,0.04979107124113182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15119695350883292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13496943371947567,0.05415450755908194,0.052006207533549134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002042674076856,0.08377210486687893,0.05273280813236998,0.15991743604234693,0.12591578025971575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04356995302012071,0.05920435312280236,0.052708986991631936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058960814793501036,0.07456153711829458,0.0,0.0,0.044035271530744484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05977036836313575,0.04964174577925945,0.0,0.11880599524110655,0.0,0.046036730696993634,0.0,0.0,0.06115503101008545,0.06998447576562489,0.10124825142956106,0.0,0.04181484983590539,0.09213856120082173,0.0,0.0,0.10065869722172276,0.0,0.1788005836495546,0.0,0.0,0.05483231509835287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043459048794481016,0.09320007053496107,0.041807747417372434,0.0,0.0,0.0947150167483172,0.0,0.0,0.058805233193577736,0.06056899157120554,0.050772914943388654,0.0,0.038345077934214176,0.0,0.0536761964920403,0.14966372290576374,0.0,0.0,0.033918364053714616
mentalhealth,MindsBC,2020/04/15,"Minds: Beautiful & Complex 1 The beginning - Quarantine has been going on for 3 weeks and I have just about lost grip on reality. The only thing keeping me from forgetting what day it is, is my home working schedule. Everything else feels stuck or pointless. I mean there’s so many reasons to push on, it’s not going to last forever. Sure feels like it though.",2.6989705882352943,5.534769485294117,3.689705882352944,83.74867647058825,82.08823529411767,7.51764705882353,27.617647058823533,8.472884824447931,2.5170823529411765,287,13,52,7,8,92,57,68,0.061,0.8140000000000001,0.124,0.6597,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,6,3,0,0,2,0,5,0,0,1,1,13,14,4,0,0,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,1,0,1,5,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,3,3,4,2,8,11,0,11,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,6,31,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25433065885999584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15138190859339548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.196087413386839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21096085370219228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373738301573488,0.16769168764937387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.266805777974356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2354540711238079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2086394670524303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913368822994506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467758291922912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25623633124040457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2379801280440321,0.0,0.2556905896746308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23701113331776716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17852330524013965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24134229520188186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22123094464711096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15594467359295405,0.0,0.2306217603833995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18828684099127616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088677444332706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gram2724,2020/04/15,"I feel so sad and useless Hello,

ever since I can remember I've never been really happy or had any feelings for anything happening, I was always emotionless. Until I've met my third ex-girlfriend... Since she left me a week ago I've been feeling super bad.

I was been born on 24.4.2000. and live in Croatia. I don't really have any memories before middle school besides being kicked out of Tekvando due to having too much fun with my best friend and some from kindergarten. So the story starts around September 2008. I went to school late so I could go to class with my best friend then. I remember the first day of middle school like it was yesterday. 

When I came there the teachers separated us, 40 students, into 2 classes A and B, my luck started to show than when I learned my best friend ended up in class A and I was in class B. Mom told me it was because they knew we were best friends and didn't want us to make trouble since we were always ""Up to no good"" I remember crying the whole day... A little after that It started to show I wasn't really good fit in the class since the other kids started bullying me. Fast forward a few months my parents signed me up to fencing with my best friend, sounds great and it was for a year or soo but than I learned I don't really like going to fencing it was more my best friends interest than mine and it was a lot of stress for me since I was also bullied there. My best friend and I already started to drift apart at that point seeing each other only 2 times a week, he found new friends in school and I was still being bullied so I wasn't really cool. My parents forced me to go to fencing despite me crying and fighting every time we had to go. I was pretty bad in school passing with 3 and 4 mostly ( we have grades from 1-5, 5 being best) and most of my classmates passed with straight 5s. At that point, I was diagnosed with dyslexia. In 3rd grade, the bullying became even worst since the other kids noticed if you put one letter (the last letter of my lastname) in front of my name it became a synonym for asshole in our language after that everybody called me asshole In school. The teachers would also always silently laugh when they would say my name except for my main teacher, respect for her. The things I liked in middle school were drawing, graffiti, video games and playing guitar and that's basically everything I did besides fencing since I didn't really have any friends to hang out with on non-birthday days.

After a long 8 years I survived middle school and was still fencing, I was sort of good at it but nothing special. I tried a few other sports but I never liked any so my parents still forced me to do fencing. The time came to go to highschool.  In Croatia, we have a lot of different specialized high schools and since I didn't really have good grades and didn't really know any high schools since nobody talked to me about that. I knew there was one for electricians, one for aircraft mechanics and gimnazije which you could only get into if you had good grades ( Its sort of dumb since that's basically prolonging middle school ). 

My father always sort of pushed me to like aviation and planes since he had a PPL. So I just automatically went for that. I was always good at drawing and anything mechanical so I thought its a good idea. Little did I know the school would be hell on earth for me. Not only was it more than an hour away It was, excuse my french, hard as FUCK and I grew from the whole aviation thing pretty fast. The classmates were cool tho and I made a few friends the first year. But I realized that the average percentage of students who fail in a year is around 40%. That's a lot of people repeating years. The reason being you had to score 70% to pass the technical exams.

The 2nd year for some yet unknown reason I started to become popular in school and my hometown. But with that came the heavy smoking and drinking. 

I started smoking and drinking in 7th grade of middle school since I wanted to feel accepted at least on the island I spent my summers on where I hung around with older friends. One time I got so drunk while on the island I ended up in the ER in 8th grade. 

Back to the whole becoming popular thing, since I had a lot of ""friends"" all of a sudden, I learned there is also an art high school, that's when the school I chose started to become even more of a burden. Besides it being hard as FUCK and far away I learned there is one I would love to go too and it was even close to my house. So naturally, I asked my parents to change schools because I would love to go there. The answer was art is a useless skill.

At that point, I realized my dad was more living his dream through my life than me actually doing what I liked. They never mentioned that school when I would ask them about highschools. They would always say become an Aircraft Mechanic YOU LOVE planes. So I sort of lost respect for my dad then and started going out more and more with my ""friends"". 

At the end of the 2nd grade, my class went on a school trip where I got super drunk and broke my knee and nose. I've broken bones before but nothing this bad... 

I had 2 screws in my knee and my face looks like I took a knife to the nose. The whole thing with my knee really fucked me in the head since I was bed-bound for a little more than 3 months, had to learn to walk again twice (when they set the screws and when they took them out a year later) and almost failed 2nd grade. I couldn't continue with fencing so my mom was really pissed about that even tho I never wanted to go to fencing and it was a pain in my ass. I mean that was the only good thing that came from that (not my mom being pissed). After finally getting out of bed I found out my girlfriend doesn't like the way I look with my new destroyed nose and she broke up with me. But I still had my ""friends"" with whom Id go clubbing. Where I met my second girlfriend with whom I was the rest of the way through high school on and off (2 years). Somewhere in the middle of 3rd grade, I realized my ""friends"" liked my money but not me so I cut ties with them.  Since I was the kid who broke his knee on a school trip I wasn't really so popular in high school as well anymore. My teachers also lost respect for me because of the whole thing.  So I was just a bit better at that time than In middle school since I had a few stoner friends in class and a girlfriend. 

At that point, I started smoking weed heavily, depending on the day 2-8 joints, since It helped me with my anxiety and made me think I am happy so I would be in a better mood while high. I was a huge pothead until recently. That didn't help me with my grades and I almost failed the 3rd  year of high school along with my pothead friends and a few others. I think my dad sort of stopped liking me than since his friend was my teacher and he would talk a lot of shit about me, I think he tolerates me only because I am his son. I also got tattooed when I turned 18  and that's when my mom sort of started throwing more shade than usual even tho I'm a sucker for any type of art and love tattoos and graffiti. While in the 4th year I got my driver's license and found my love for cars, I had my motorcycle license and liked bikes but cars are next level. My uncle owns a rally team so I started studying my ass off to impress him and get a chance to drive a little with him. I almost failed 4th grade still and went to extensions again but my uncle is a cool dude and realized my love and interest in the sport so he let me drive trough summer. I broke up with my girlfriend since things ware not going anywhere with her. I lost my stoner friends when I ended high school. But I had two good friends left and were single and driving, through the summer had a lot of fun. I worked in a bar to pay for gas and some other things. On the job, I meet the girl of my dreams. She is smart, funny good, looking and charismatic. Somehow I made her my girlfriend and finally at that point, I started to feel some happiness and not like I'm just standing by watching my life like a movie. Everything started looking up and I didn't feel so empty that summer.

Just to clarify that summer lasted a long time since school ended early because it was the last year. Almost 5 months.

Then she moved to Amsterdam to go to college and we were apart for 3 months. I had a good-paying job at the bar and was driving but I started feeling empty again all of a sudden. I bought a tattoo machine and tattooed my friend and my self but I still wasn't happy... Since I went to Amsterdam for a week to visit her and liked it I booked the EBS Amsterdam international course since I don't wanna have anything to do with planes for a while after school. I still had plans to later work as an Aircraft mechanic since its a great paying job despite me not really liking aviation and planes after school. My girlfriend got back to Croatia for winter break and after we went to Amsterdam together. It was amazing and I truly loved every minute there even tho I had some problems with finding a place and failed EBS. I almost got a promising job at the airport but that slipped from me... At that point, I started feeling empty again... I loved my girlfriend and was ready to do anything for her. When I was with her I was truly happy and I really never felt that feeling with anybody or anything else. I felt like I had the power to move a mountain just by blowing at it. She made me into a better person and would always motivate me to try harder when I wanted to quit trying. After a week or so, I found a job at a bar. then the first day I was supposed to work.

The coronavirus started making havoc in Amsterdam, everything closed and it became more than a meme. I lost my job needless to say. So about 2 or 3 weeks into the virus we decided to go back to Croatia since it started looking like the airports were gonna close. We took the last plane to Croatia if I'm not wrong. So now we were back in Croatia but we had to be 2 weeks in self-isolation. That was the worst time of my life. My parents put me in my room and literally didn't let me out for 2 whole fucking weeks. I started losing my mind but I was so excited to see my girlfriend that I just focused on that and got through it. The last day came and I was making plans for tomorrow, my girlfriend didn't feel so good so I asked what her plans are, I wanted to go smoke one with my buddies since I didn't see them for about 3 months. We got into a bit of an argument that day but she said I should come by her place later. I didn't think much of it since she was a bit sick so it looked like she was just a bit grumpy that day. After I met my buddies I was rushing to my girlfriend super excited and happy I'm finally gonna see her after two weeks, I texted her that I'm coming. She was upset and called me angrily to tell me her friend is there and ""why the fuck am I coming over"" after a painful phone call with her and her friend yelling how worthless I am in the background she told me to come and take my stuff... She broke up with me... That crushed me... When I saw her I told her to sit and talk to me in the car but she just threw my stuff in and told me to go... I didn't sleep the whole night I was desperately calling and texting her to talk to me, she blocked me on everything... I somehow got her to talk with me the day after, she told me I never listened to her and that we fought too much... That crushed me even more... I did everything I could for her and I always had her best interest in mind, yes we fought every now and then but we lived together and the fights would be minor and normal like what to eat and where to go... The usual shit... I was so crushed after the 2 weeks of self-isolation and not sleeping I couldn't even mumble a word all I could do was cry and smack my head against the starting wheel. She gave me a calming pill and rushed off. That was the last time I saw her.

 Its been a week since and with everything happening all I can do is be home and think about the breakup, drive around,  and see my buddies once in a while. Since I've been in my room for 2 weeks and meeting people is sort of a no no and hard since they live far away. I've been mostly driving around. I couldn't sleep or eat the past week all I did was think about her except when I was driving. Today I wrecked my car. Now all I have left is be at home. I've never been so sad, angry and tired. Without the car, I have to be home and the worst thing is I don't have any motivation to draw or do anything to get my mind off the breakup. I'm just becoming more and more depressed every minute. I feel so empty and like I truly have no purpose now... No job, no school or college, parents think I'm crazy, friends live too far away to see them, I have a creative blockade, I'm not sleeping or eating and for some reason, I'm thinking about middle school a lot...

I once again feel like I'm just watching my life go by, the only difference is I feel something and its just sadness and disappointment. What do I do now...",3.555613888348572,4.698345300000003,4.347055436685468,88.22593191985996,72.41509433962264,7.169577903131686,25.886208908772613,7.489067907523996,1.161842054075083,10215,324,2154,113,194,3281,636,2650,0.133,0.715,0.152,0.9957,15,2,4,0,4,0,257.0,18,5,12,41,128,173,20,2,148,4,183,56,21,14,14,389,362,203,0,30,54,15,18,21,34,14,10,7,6,6,93,182,10,10,55,24,5,68,46,57,2,14,160,47,362,115,330,166,71,412,1,23,16,17,196,152,15,44,209,1477,455,82,0.0,0.0,0.014679692864904566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.013334616336358046,0.0,0.07531641819543493,0.0,0.016600205654265985,0.06014897745542588,0.1001351312505731,0.0,0.0,0.07160777797123534,0.0,0.011507771390928132,0.0,0.014918506958344685,0.0,0.0,0.07427411146611053,0.0669568168687243,0.04218922081527079,0.0,0.05653316977238726,0.04626822236711823,0.037680560040139664,0.04585003743824608,0.08306846310637939,0.02560078667316221,0.0,0.1420792860175795,0.03991264722114921,0.06569176901335377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061441899501075564,0.08602530626318072,0.0,0.0,0.01591338537571261,0.05183247871112106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04804210161583942,0.0,0.049571732304126134,0.08731278925801869,0.0,0.01295642104547411,0.015268218975242324,0.0,0.031433241352982706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029472615016555237,0.0,0.046177902677213035,0.0125664062064239,0.0,0.0666176877972392,0.0,0.0,0.07948550762359635,0.013607157254728672,0.05069714203405084,0.0,0.08111748945494464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09887979797666524,0.010746645223401305,0.028887071185695005,0.04943625948106233,0.013748930984222816,0.038386429369156524,0.0,0.06597501960026254,0.27893042953599523,0.06953455739899307,0.03143716129586984,0.0,0.14533677952023905,0.1514071716888788,0.10828057608262028,0.033169683605773485,0.0,0.0,0.026604759859383282,0.09608063107836212,0.040426430171041874,0.0,0.030876694629630733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020165867158514757,0.12714913252619697,0.045267742323586345,0.0,0.014814218698487132,0.017357477949901813,0.0,0.01698159431408831,0.0,0.0,0.10449424575688096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01653436034117584,0.07357178955190385,0.01696903767124933,0.0,0.04903243930754558,0.030764753009165563,0.042500958646819686,0.15433314337575385,0.06030771974431798,0.06641574724126666,0.026624972523925792,0.0757934450043759,0.01682914859598988,0.06568437550570146,0.08952250331665586,0.10861438049708763,0.05693579344521753,0.030123742144535462,0.0,0.0,0.016386119626519206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04556709875366005,0.07047221433936407,0.060035465350030286,0.03197642760865557,0.03317476996571942,0.0,0.08121404103348084,0.029057038131048856,0.01599828655726539,0.01411673533565575,0.014738840488723941,0.02886812163050475,0.017126432521142654,0.0,0.032040378581688726,0.06116071857776796,0.06864478445238867,0.03201339589651444,0.0,0.10022010977084306,0.0,0.014360142783731626,0.020857694807667908,0.013134873274317498,0.031433241352982706,0.0,0.0853223727669951,0.0,0.0,0.030608058855003287,0.0,0.014394016288626969,0.0,0.030244523155866013,0.0,0.015999967565580017,0.0,0.0,0.12527920555149352,0.04639979584484243,0.014853041300939087,0.0,0.05112199342081628,0.0,0.014309235309809643,0.03588813506498265,0.0,0.4567263015179461,0.0719234250423296,0.0,0.04707905202391928,0.0,0.03088262542849868,0.36086544143485777,0.0,0.060215024155516814,0.0,0.0,0.011580753377117245,0.0,0.0,0.21294873108467052,0.0,0.08409291223313621,0.012576531490443393,0.01723158223859066,0.0,0.034441025273320845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01131038285495033,0.06045453484747008,0.013148150861828323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994446263657525,0.07711102354648762,0.0,0.011942376132784005,0.07017305150439036,0.017289591733342373,0.01425890292619992,0.07187064093110866,0.0501396203419685,0.030639409172825836,0.01636234708405456,0.02938943980541473,0.0,0.03618949436932836,0.0,0.033135241121523766,0.0,0.044363437961170316,0.02388069534541137,0.1447980093991814,0.0,0.013525366704295482,0.08366947089976899,0.01357387047619793,0.11756396382883298,0.0,0.0145008113144326,0.0,0.032854214136487515,0.0,0.0,0.11754642951763697,0.01644704119384781,0.0,0.1065584234358231
mentalhealth,vipa5269,2020/04/15,I had a mental breakdown today This quarantine is the worst for my mental health and focus. I've already had the hardest time focusing before everything happened with the virus and now just being at home all the time when I study is the worst. I'm only taking 1 class right now (my last class) and working so things literally aren't even that bad for me. I could have all my work done so quick and relax if i could just sit down and get it all done. I'm have been diagnosed ADD and am really thinking I need to start getting prescribed adderall again. So tired of feeling stuck.,5.759436090225563,6.159725394736848,5.8737092731829605,81.95763157894739,66.98245614035089,8.61954887218045,29.44360902255639,8.418075326091056,2.0200766917293227,461,15,89,6,7,146,79,114,0.114,0.8190000000000001,0.066,-0.7659999999999999,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,2,11,4,0,0,6,0,14,3,0,0,3,19,25,11,0,4,3,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,4,8,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,6,1,9,1,7,16,5,14,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,10,63,13,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19971841507913649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1511126204748153,0.0,0.0,0.15400256616185626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2889992025285704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18369317575490168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3704153582200678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953707031534375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16265517795936466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09151006433080794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.189111513416245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600420074106607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923756703678371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18153995477267013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14752469045532554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647750843202157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13419604636361124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13764515773490696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1159418647076439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15455785401920585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810016921210302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360761297043582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202365661208612,0.11596611909953056,0.0,0.0,0.21106441268879494,0.2080124746804628,0.1715500128431288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2635144693452889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,marko09frog,2020/04/15,"Starting therapy soon.. For a while now I've known my mental state has very much deteriorated and I've been finding it hard to just exist in all honesty and experience true happiness. Whatever that may be.
I've had anxiety for some time now and it never reach this severity before. At this point honestly I feel numbed out because of it.
But I'm flushed with all kinds of emotions ranging from too much mania to very bad depression. 
I feel it's been a trend that's been going on for a while and I just keep putting off dealing with it or I just forget(adhd really doesn't help there idk)
I think i'm using this platform to maybe vent out a little before I hopefully actually go through with it and get the help I need.  
So today(tomorrow) I finally am seriously going through with it. Gonna register in my clinic and see where it goes..
I only fear the thoughts in the back of my head coming out.. And that possibly the only thing that can actually benefit me is medication..",3.76892105263158,5.75313151052632,5.437039473684212,77.2324013157895,73.3684210526316,9.171052631578947,29.24342105263158,9.673873057562805,2.9719210526315782,777,33,147,21,16,264,118,190,0.12300000000000001,0.784,0.09300000000000001,-0.4208,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,11,11,0,1,8,0,11,4,1,1,4,36,29,12,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,16,15,0,1,6,0,0,5,2,5,0,0,5,5,13,6,25,21,5,29,0,1,1,0,3,13,0,4,10,101,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.2668956037713697,0.0,0.16434634454270455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10461300592969272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051519372522333,0.11418013436325172,0.08336123608060345,0.0,0.2327275331655955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11779759995562125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14098274700468694,0.11778215830097938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15382480023823014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13376726744883144,0.0,0.1538812248486578,0.13828932895281035,0.0,0.0,0.1498024112155248,0.12498658078255705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07144597831623012,0.0,0.2331537051010335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.145572403310181,0.12250070656696813,0.0,0.1403444563091184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18332063689535585,0.0,0.0,0.1358231256908999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154925365035794,0.0,0.14240357799795034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370589410603018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738326984916133,0.0,0.0,0.13776075123595852,0.13781134894351918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20105325866285986,0.1013980338417066,0.10546965757303664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080083391478472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927249457477594,0.15416453301913124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13747103469311092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760524203106546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897165974245453,0.0,0.0,0.15448802960079736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679201172367256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15638499011635934,0.0,0.09085030245600148,0.08762356855942435,0.0,0.108563841142902,0.07973974286325032,0.0,0.12962255207340878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810767580213832,0.0,0.22566534559186024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rafi1243e,2020/04/15,"First love Do you ever go back and think about what it could have been. Recently I have started to think about her and wondering if the choices I made. I walked away to make her happy because I felt like I was holding her back and that she deserves better someone who is not a emotional wreck like me. She was my rock the one who kept me sane, and I let that slip from my hand. It been three years and there hasn't been a time where I though about going back but as I said she deserves someone better who can bring her happiness and joy. The decision to walk away was difficult but when things went well the rug got pulled from under me and in that respect I felt I was justified but now I wished I had stayed.",5.822844827586208,5.275184413793107,5.638750000000003,86.91812500000002,66.93103448275862,9.18103448275862,29.15948275862069,8.472884824447931,1.7469482758620691,560,16,123,7,8,174,89,145,0.027999999999999997,0.728,0.244,0.9862,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,3,13,11,0,0,6,0,16,2,1,2,1,25,33,14,0,3,5,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,10,7,0,2,6,1,0,7,2,1,1,3,15,4,25,10,13,16,0,24,0,0,0,1,13,5,0,2,13,95,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803558198819953,0.3441757856964796,0.0,0.090950674723342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26390979503179113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191237183550024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782943762161465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349595553821572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2865099749001072,0.0,0.0,0.1269090803559676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16958711098991014,0.0,0.11932852796237794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31765143907793125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1525666717093312,0.0,0.14578274976074285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465843954016687,0.14117624322351738,0.099591873359158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10110149180547798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14731657851245494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14192296003630492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2528326276272825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560422551299002,0.15902689290846894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912156651808147,0.19120212359713296,0.14658782269170773,0.0,0.08699947069721897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13414833404368925,0.1383094986986725,0.0,0.0,0.17157214543020902,0.0,0.16180057221136318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09607963314590263
mentalhealth,tawayfortop,2020/04/15,"SSRI helped but I am stuck I used to have terrible social anxiety from elementary to high school. Then my application to my dream university was denied and I became completely depressed, going to a weaker uni and still doing terrible grade-wise. After 3 years my grades were so bad I would have had to repeat semesters. Instead I started an even easier major, and also started doing SSRI (doing 200 mg of sertraline now). 

The antidepressant took effect quite slowly so I failed that major too already in the first year. Now (1 year later) I feel much better but have been living with my Mom for this year, doing basically nothing (playing the piano, reading, playing video games etc.) My mother thinks I will never be able to work and live with her forever. I am feeling better now and think I could start working but I have very little incentive to do so because the desire to start my own life and actually do something is quiet dulled (maybe from the SSRI), and doing nothing like this feels pretty OK too.

Has anyone been in such a situation? And what did you do?",6.397532213978912,7.5271105025380765,7.0915736040609145,71.21019133151114,65.80203045685279,9.10722374072628,29.87465833658727,9.265573868473778,2.7839007418976958,847,29,136,15,13,280,130,197,0.18600000000000005,0.675,0.139,-0.9335,0,0,1,0,0,0,25.0,0,1,0,8,13,12,0,0,8,1,26,1,0,2,1,24,39,16,0,3,3,2,3,1,0,2,1,1,0,0,4,10,0,0,6,6,0,2,1,6,0,1,8,4,19,6,17,27,5,24,0,3,0,0,7,4,0,0,19,104,23,6,0.12962323785348506,0.0,0.12649358176814582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430424662573199,0.10365965647984604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.099161422163512,0.0,0.0,0.09063558179755557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822998924139778,0.07901712267608853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292824403214296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590749870407587,0.0,0.0,0.10349360788714737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164430482441563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445641745621183,0.08561492609635507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19662421140371136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025745990011264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07366787324082412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688372399260465,0.13695406760180767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155672631048299,0.06332736649256412,0.12991653757562968,0.2289193876648668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.130223964971163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15181316954236904,0.0,0.0,0.09528799446321473,0.0,0.099973432051745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24875398535695256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13187343329218726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13787026909690964,0.1296583157425475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13118563696211846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570195034808475,0.0,0.13213456715236904,0.0,0.09979030131804018,0.0,0.0,0.36699197967936215,0.0,0.1035172851909555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16611467371913674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14401618671267774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11195285898617756,0.0,0.10695274647278748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188734521925298,0.0,0.0,0.0920806290987346,0.0,0.0,0.33389246125141464
mentalhealth,glassofwaterjuice,2020/04/15,"My Father's mental state has completely deteriorated and has put a massive strain on the house during quarantine. My father for a couple years now has gotten into weird religious stuff. It was weird but acceptable before the transplant he got for his kidney in 2017 but ever since the surgery he has gone crazy. He used to be part of cult esq group but has left them and has been on his own for a year now. Ever since quarantine, he has completely lost it. He spends every waking moment on Facebook, staring at abstract images that he believes are messages from Jesus himself. He believes hes an apostle and has been building shrines in and outside the house out of random junk. He hallucinates and see things that aren't there.  He lies to everyone in the family, stealing our stuff for his shrines or taking out large amounts of money buying random things. He has lost 25 pounds in the last two weeks as he says he is too busy for food. He sleeps at random hours, he thinks every word, every color, every sound is a message from god. He refuses to follow quarantine guidelines as he believes he cannot die. He constantly leaves the house, goes to graveyards and churches for a divine quest or something.

He has put a massive strain on the family and my mother has becomes incredibly upset at the thought of getting him mental help. I have no trust for him as I think hes a danger to the house. He lies, he manipulates, and one time he left the burners on the stove on as a show of ""faith"". I can't sleep when hes awake as I don't know what he will do.  

 Its only getting worse with time. His behavior becomes more and more chaotic and unpredictable. What was one shrine has turned into 15. I just don't know what to do.",5.825484796328169,6.484689626506026,6.0010154905335655,80.19676706827312,66.89156626506022,8.492484222604705,29.96615031554791,8.418075326091056,2.151816236374068,1364,47,254,18,21,434,173,332,0.12,0.8,0.08,-0.9125,0,3,1,0,0,0,32.0,1,0,1,2,8,13,1,3,21,0,32,5,4,2,2,36,49,21,1,0,6,3,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,12,15,1,1,6,1,3,4,6,9,0,3,10,5,20,4,43,37,5,38,7,2,3,0,44,19,0,5,14,156,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2015423819711162,0.07764143174040612,0.3084002733646627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913339840109623,0.09860172438024173,0.0,0.0,0.10095911098356082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469626657453294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16506979799671787,0.3075060733814733,0.08718699988765075,0.0,0.0,0.17203235564097855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11033190808289588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953418441404451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.072975699831772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06115854244882564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985639109846652,0.4211306337224967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028999703719754,0.07437556704070472,0.0,0.09661360940530984,0.1982724899910102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19920594715877896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18390381742134693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12365780831331545,0.06939473402956313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880773443723216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18344968145756205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07256043143026716,0.0,0.0,0.07270919402142581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15095500315100135,0.0,0.18261863384919125,0.0,0.0,0.07024364401852685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20890377682271774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06860369797238079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12123615045949634,0.11693020116045424,0.0,0.07243708509190698,0.10640954627589083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09924664194567397,0.08913156512229277,0.0,0.0,0.0788050208248017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318996942321028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09298484217836853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11751554449096616
mentalhealth,tanay_aggarwal,2020/04/15,"Simply giving in around my friends. Should you or should you not argue with your friends if they are the only ones you have and you'll probably feel lonely if you mess it up?
I've never been able to argue or fight with my friends. I just simply give in. I just can't seem to raise my opinion fearing that it might get rejected and I'll feel miserable about it. I don't know if it's right or wrong. But atleast at the end of the day, I can sleep peacefully keeping in mind that I'm on good terms with my friends. 
It justs maintain my mental peace. 
You feel me? Should I do something differently?",2.2219299552906118,4.135179926229512,2.953487332339794,93.6416616989568,77.60655737704917,6.075707898658719,23.38599105812221,6.980632752743323,0.6063672131147541,469,15,103,5,11,147,76,122,0.146,0.65,0.204,0.8079999999999999,1,3,1,0,1,0,11.0,0,7,1,0,5,14,3,2,3,0,12,1,1,0,1,30,22,9,0,6,11,0,3,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,9,0,1,1,3,19,5,14,16,1,12,0,3,0,0,17,8,0,9,4,69,26,0,0.1734098824099179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15437156037487246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118350283127585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18117641870631074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15358968503518478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951343285282203,0.2630437407912944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5359041799523616,0.0,0.09059950633022892,0.3327011209745805,0.0,0.14544798198929412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541346711887432,0.0,0.0,0.09530153631227843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747563750295716,0.18396048150043945,0.17509454763333512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13374439169467878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1175070242039914,0.131886029721317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18696518281020505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14809109208256982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578658441262855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17353511695311247,0.0,0.0,0.13349939951948492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18959648407584645,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mntalbreakdance,2020/04/15,"loneliness and anxiety hey there
I've been feeling extremely anxious lately over everything in my life, especially my relationships with people. Last year I was diagnosed with depressive-anxious syndrome and it keeps getting worse since college started. After a year I've decided to attend therapy again and I had my first session on Monday.
 Everything seems terrifying to me these days. I need someone to talk to and maybe get friends with. All of my other ""close"" people I had abandoned me over the years. Dunno what to do",5.490458937198067,8.531054760869566,5.968405797101454,70.47900966183576,72.04347826086956,9.306280193236717,35.22222222222222,9.725611199111238,4.396872946859904,426,23,62,12,9,137,67,92,0.171,0.782,0.047,-0.8999,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,2,0,5,2,0,0,1,16,12,4,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,4,8,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,4,1,10,1,14,8,1,17,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,2,11,43,14,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14854142989354216,0.21935965432214885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522519805474766,0.0,0.0,0.19708099869781048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3490194427078088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09817944948200001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16516302804720248,0.0,0.0,0.15001719069007832,0.0,0.2028942326037032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17258943837108848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15827650215114264,0.21903503588816645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13714977806697048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19507237332000368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397644730105036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692295237509251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2084685963804109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767673500426765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606214972981591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16452172788158245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13743629385211995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560684991860604,0.0,0.0,0.2220531743575309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19787836461150773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751221685524282
mentalhealth,Nichard,2020/04/15,"I had really bad PND when my daughter was born and I have a long history of depression and anxiety but I'm not 100% convinced... So yeah, I'm 31 and since I was in my early 20s I have had periods of depression and anxiety according to my doctor which I am on antidepressants for.

However, without going into my whole upbringing (it was shit and there was a lot of physical abuse from my dad to my mum and my mum also had Bipolar) I'm not at all convinced I have only depression and I don't think I have anxiety, my overwhelming feelings aren't of anxiety.

I definitely think I have BPD. My moods can change within hours, I can be super happy and ""normal"" for a short while and then i can just change to being really irritable, angry and upset the next. My husband has mentioned a few times that I often speak very very quickly and it's hard for him to understand so he sometimes asks me to repeat myself which pisses me off for some reason. I also have this overwhelming fear of being abandoned, like, my mum passed away when I was 24 and I've not filled that void at all. I have zero contact with my dad because of my childhood, but when it comes to my husband and my daughter or my close friends I can't bare the thought of them leaving me but deep down it's a feeling I can't shake in thinking it'll happen one day.

When my daughter was born, she's 2 now I had really bad PND, I had a community nurse because I couldn't cope. I had some pretty dark thoughts about harming myself and giving my daughter up to for adoption. I didn't want to hold her, look at her or anything at all and I did everything I could to avoid her I just didn't bond with her at all. However, as I say she's 2 now and whilst sometimes I still struggle I love her to pieces and couldn't be without her... But I worry that the way I was when she was born and over these past 2 years could have possibly harmed our relationship, certainly hers to me if that makes sense?

I just feel like whilst I know I have depression, my mood swings and the constant up and down can't just be that?

Can anyone shed any light?",2.9671002485501248,4.473816000000003,4.3927147196906935,85.88525269262634,74.44600938967136,7.734769400718036,26.144435238884288,8.405096225971981,1.6855045015189178,1640,58,341,29,34,545,198,426,0.19699999999999998,0.701,0.102,-0.9925,2,1,0,0,1,0,38.0,1,0,1,1,20,29,2,7,10,1,47,5,2,2,5,71,69,39,0,7,16,11,4,2,1,1,2,2,0,0,14,25,0,3,11,0,0,5,14,18,0,2,19,8,72,9,47,40,10,54,0,7,1,1,34,20,2,7,30,252,86,1,0.0,0.11901051399519295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16065113920503776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06830582279489436,0.0,0.3073596030844871,0.0,0.0,0.07023325159831897,0.0,0.082657408358238,0.0,0.09390221126603074,0.0,0.09437107777036018,0.0,0.1677342146234108,0.12246028209717155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650655081913553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212514293456738,0.08652419277340635,0.0,0.1085450090973608,0.0,0.1603937980514365,0.0,0.0,0.06477850522555935,0.0,0.3460514025393093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280938016506508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09027319638730023,0.0,0.0,0.11302818366443122,0.1523635357765239,0.07175769525970792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07760330605979457,0.0,0.0,0.09635568403188133,0.057085023049693824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08882289359893411,0.10692522335975746,0.08997869866509994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989177709674366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05520176604009919,0.0,0.0,0.1063564068249666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981443882351989,0.0,0.0,0.08889037578488504,0.08434822862152813,0.0,0.0,0.08539446999960228,0.09065524001341796,0.0,0.06704759993945499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10682405044449682,0.0,0.09841445421202427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06806391071096812,0.07639270087711822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09588580699742977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11323627797845427,0.0,0.10218834409020268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19304229081863689,0.10327385403017483,0.0,0.10783998963283324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987763641266518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10310501455339438,0.08308887239704782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19868470213277595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021524650032529,0.0,0.0,0.10500658226504372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19308267418994127,0.0,0.15948370294146502,0.05857009723288922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045664481285488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16575475112925447,0.05924487122657743,0.07972830700014465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214289156665898,0.0,0.1936501629464321,0.0,0.0,0.102006442267358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06468307692400399
mentalhealth,South_Operation,2020/04/15,"Can worrying over a mental health issue give you symptoms of that issue? Recently I have suspected I have some certain issue...Recently I have been noticing signs here and there if it. Now, what I am wondering is, if you suspect you have a neurological condition, is it possible to develop symptoms from thinking to much about it and reading about it a lot? While I do fit into some signs, I do not remember doing a lot of them before I started worrying about it. Problem is that I do not have an elephants memory and could have simply not remembered about instances in my past where I showed clear signs of said neurological condition.

 So, to keep it short, is it possible that I developed some symptoms from thinking about it and over analyzing my behaviors? Some examples would be:making certain repetitive movements and sensitivity to bright light. I am aware that it could be just me recognizing it because I am thinking about it. Thanks.

Edit: 
1. I do not, and never have felt like I am suffering or having a lower quality of life than others, but at times I feel like I am at risk of getting overly obsessed about some things I am really interested in, and then try to avoid it. Other than that my life is good.
2. Why is my post pinned?",5.782837982832621,7.049567699570818,6.852465128755367,71.87122988197427,67.28326180257511,10.46019313304721,33.44662017167382,10.550175099000144,3.85152381974249,986,44,171,27,16,331,122,233,0.11199999999999999,0.809,0.079,-0.5776,2,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,3,1,0,13,13,0,3,6,0,31,8,0,0,4,47,43,14,0,6,9,0,2,2,0,1,8,1,0,0,21,8,0,2,10,2,0,1,5,5,0,0,3,5,26,8,29,36,8,22,0,1,1,0,6,11,0,11,11,145,47,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07762064862293054,0.0,0.10835049314324738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20332911906848186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643830868856596,0.0909662913453923,0.122259071504053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652592306864781,0.12214883985202785,0.0,0.10680037510404616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13534838589125175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.265803885288547,0.0,0.11317888687316588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987727827407685,0.12441635676573058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21650690449727805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832110937335248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360396437785187,0.0,0.09820659596436036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14496878030671428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155318288370225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2870962958376885,0.121949240393108,0.0,0.0,0.1218399093040078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12736685703614958,0.0,0.08157239538345018,0.0,0.1257253825970017,0.0,0.2884855723811554,0.0,0.12112227035163492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0901265274455054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3970413520487193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723056542606645,0.0,0.0,0.08459398799468,0.24476837962174464,0.0,0.0,0.07424854588392257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08645034065752935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489768488250494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380865551664138,0.0,0.2586244642561614,0.0,0.09045328296184778,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spoopypoopy30,2020/04/15,"thanks for everybody who supported me i will never be able to repay you guys, i owe you everything...


edit: everyone who supported me*",3.17625,6.225134125000004,5.721666666666668,68.29000000000002,82.75,11.533333333333333,28.83333333333333,10.504223727775694,5.015933333333333,105,5,16,5,3,37,19,24,0.0,0.7170000000000001,0.28300000000000003,0.7579,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,6,3,2,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,13,8,1,0.3116695007874698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978135643054581,0.2801084507423546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086018063887062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403787328225551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7073577120858746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2869434022070784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,volleyballer929,2020/04/15,"Body image I’m an 18 yo male, senior year of high school, and I’ve always been the really skinny guy. About three years ago I started working out but didn’t take it seriously, I took on a little muscle. Seven months ago I started taking it seriously, and I have made little progress. I had started exercising to try to improve my mental health, but my very small progress has been snowballing inside my head and I am getting more and more frustrated. I’m not very(physically) strong at all, but my body does not look weak I don’t think, but all I can think about is the minimal size I’ve put on. I put so much effort in and get nothing back. This is especially frustrating because I was so excited to be able to put effort into my health and get something out of it, because my mental health only gets worse no matter what I do.

I am also very sexually frustrated (I am gay) and I think this is one of the factors behind my body image. My frustration is getting more intense with every week, especially with quarantine(I have a home gym), and I can’t stop thinking about it over and over. I feel like a little p*ssy, and it is all I can think about all the time. I’ve been trying to keep myself busy but it makes me more frustrated to not be researching fitness. I’ve been considering ending my life more and more. I’m on smallish doses of two antidepressants but I am very scared to increase/try different medications because I had a very breaking experience with a dose increase once. I don’t know what to do, I just don’t want to feel like that anymore I don’t care what it takes. If anyone has any advice I would appreciate it so so much and if I left out anything relevant you want to know just let me know",4.140735294117647,5.4565963088235305,5.401058823529412,80.56276470588237,71.20588235294117,8.263529411764706,27.717647058823534,8.726425361277474,2.0471847058823536,1355,48,265,24,25,452,164,340,0.135,0.752,0.113,-0.9147,1,1,1,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,0,6,12,14,5,1,10,0,34,15,5,2,4,54,66,25,0,5,13,0,2,2,0,1,9,0,1,2,14,19,1,2,10,2,0,5,10,9,0,4,10,3,37,5,33,52,13,38,0,0,1,1,3,18,0,2,16,176,51,4,0.08484683402926453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291134423304254,0.15042319800384246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06785198251888602,0.07059936285050825,0.0,0.0,0.057698756661813476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08414526033261523,0.0593268791404154,0.0,0.06982171498729982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652419780859974,0.0,0.15516552751319498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827371157709196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08650700203789695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08864688283250742,0.0,0.0,0.07425003623173403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514911107535596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07148711708360045,0.0,0.0,0.08299648451160663,0.0,0.0,0.0858022172946216,0.12122919036741127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216448442817981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08401170528921534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08707733002623548,0.2705646508688329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08964533856635823,0.08510829251934204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541576456174673,0.0,0.0,0.13988880313823476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218633343128173,0.08676163634380474,0.05992982809385585,0.08290375465513854,0.2551164532812153,0.0,0.0,0.07124997136338336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08028412586911139,0.056635920560997866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08547425894482087,0.1710113050263153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772393343614491,0.0,0.12474437122671345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141282558284743,0.0,0.0,0.09035910914006412,0.057494410591553476,0.0645298406240268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558835091566563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05435505450650058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08494648251316507,0.08586952579389649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06531923807698968,0.0,0.0,0.18016507749051466,0.0,0.0,0.07093575243819934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1913827796136799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718321264047581,0.0,0.0,0.04947487124262899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09426795452640836,0.17281629244023322,0.0,0.08288302811941517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800300958137693,0.10008972203225627,0.0,0.0680590123761425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061769505694220725,0.0,0.0864661725436428,0.060272756519795176,0.0,0.0,0.10927715860424228
mentalhealth,hannesz111,2020/04/15,"Why look forward to anything I have now stopped looking forward to things. I feel like everytime I do, I end up getting disappointed because nothing turns out being as good as I was expecting. I just see no point in looking forward to anything anymore, I give up",4.880714285714287,6.983269265306124,5.5630102040816345,76.99716836734696,70.63265306122447,7.348979591836735,42.86224489795919,8.07648339933343,4.059322448979594,210,15,34,3,4,68,35,49,0.145,0.746,0.109,-0.2023,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,5,12,2,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,1,5,7,2,9,10,0,11,0,1,4,0,1,8,0,0,7,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22353428890981572,0.0,0.0,0.3709667626781424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13740055280148458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19963576130173652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11396802121726013,0.1610244044452036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11776117267024375,0.21622233796653095,0.0,0.18905318158300927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11011809679794386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5678327556633148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2162754979052193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2130740023987484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17961305508751216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18844285366610852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14974444197980408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451683422840033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2033866722134449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Feisty_Flabebe,2020/04/15,"Sorry for posting so much I finally feel like I can just word vomit everything I am going through.  I had a huge trigger Monday which led me to have a massive anxiety spell.  That led to an anxiety ""hangover"" Tuesday. Tuesday I had two big exams and I didn't do well which spiked my anxiety even higher.  I had another exam today.  I am at a breaking point. I feel like I have no calm down when it comes to anything.  I am loosing it since I have even more on my plate I can't take care of my anxiety levels now.  I just want to make it all go away and feel better (I am not suicidal). My doctor got back with me today to up my meds to hopefully have a change in anxiety level.  My school semester will be over in 4 weeks.  I just feel like I am loosing it and there is nothing else to hold on to.  I relapsed on cutting again and my eating disorder is getting out of control. I am in therapy and working on it I just don't have access to my therapist all the time.  None of my friends or classmates can understand what I am going through.  My family and loved ones try and they just tell me that I am much harder on myself and as long as I am doing the best I can then I shouldn't worry. They don't let my feelings be validated that I am okay to experience some anxiety based off the situations.  ",2.0677186126038123,3.738458595505623,4.3171665852467065,84.78700537371762,77.27715355805243,7.639732942517504,26.58996906041361,8.456263369488248,1.8988203549910438,1003,40,209,20,23,348,144,267,0.094,0.78,0.126,0.9083,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,2,4,14,13,1,0,8,1,34,4,0,5,2,37,52,14,1,3,7,0,5,3,1,2,2,0,0,0,11,11,1,2,6,0,0,6,8,1,1,2,5,5,43,12,34,42,8,42,0,0,0,1,5,20,0,3,17,166,54,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11211352974363076,0.4907548599040715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798494109570265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045359373931516,0.0822138442160542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11220452963057932,0.09456085964296412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10901069216152376,0.0,0.1131057576276067,0.0921009520589772,0.0,0.0,0.11991836045775063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253803896849193,0.10943577154881147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094044739621425,0.08931681481195741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123752344210394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609159087390874,0.1045869584015858,0.10079339022992666,0.0,0.2703064167043568,0.2291481205130069,0.0,0.11712415786805555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08260508583707983,0.0,0.05586058312044437,0.0,0.1822930027774176,0.0,0.08551261375268522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619434684977264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10933156632524657,0.0,0.15670515908851002,0.0,0.0,0.09461964308766653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649825842625047,0.0,0.07136903090058287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876252004216804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571950238747251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259133085809297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07245084613218272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107268594488604,0.0,0.10239851422166406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082073846262034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844421436344252,0.12018104532781923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11968667811579825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169516524319484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0803895206245619,0.0,0.09345161507235657,0.0,0.1222707973921087,0.12414079651546035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06234512619450809,0.0,0.20269276214070445,0.0,0.0,0.07259074684476688,0.0,0.10444398778011496,0.11130608812827936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06306339151720315,0.0,0.08576369394587069,0.0,0.09613270917295567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783805254576225,0.10858108175104908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DThrowRA,2020/04/15,"I don't know what's wrong I am posting for some advice..
The basic story is i have some undiagnosed issue which is ruining/ruined my relationship.
I have no feelings most of the time. Sometimes I wonder if i actually have feelings for my partner.
When i do have feelings it feels false. Especially now. She has told me she still loves me and wants to be with me but can't take it anymore. She can't just move out as she has a 6yo, no savings for a deposit and from what we can see due to the lock down moving is not possible.
We have just watched a movie together and i just wanted to be closer to her...it hurts..i don't know how i am feeling or why i am feeling it. I just know its not good.
I'm not suicidal but I have been.
I know and understand why she wants out, but i feel it will never change. I know i need to see someone but it feels like it will take longer than i have.
I know this is just a load of nonsense but i need so much help and i can't keep it in but i have no one to turn to.",-0.043115608094574036,1.8730122580645163,2.3365698256862366,95.1149168503306,85.40552995391704,5.432899218593469,20.03386094970948,6.7026698264267655,0.09194265678220814,768,23,185,9,23,262,109,217,0.068,0.835,0.09699999999999999,0.7069,0,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,2,0,0,0,10,5,0,0,7,0,29,1,0,1,1,54,59,17,1,6,16,0,8,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,12,10,0,1,16,0,1,2,12,1,0,1,2,11,33,4,20,53,4,14,0,0,3,1,12,5,0,6,7,136,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.11824856715915386,0.0,0.0,0.11841005340777838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120172273916958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12818626633723393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4901546453669949,0.0865668928587104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016351935663512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08122053093893901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12647441221845587,0.0,0.10770522166960618,0.0,0.0,0.3995651211296428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059199607166109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10936447193460452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2575780557801549,0.08907700023387277,0.17969830967779168,0.0934570349645904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211079306179478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13660573556609376,0.11605141499314328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13009577292920307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1931203428369451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267053035338476,0.0,0.11984441013569153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676989519098678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13254493830968533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18221587861920588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07065766693778858,0.0,0.0,0.11578716788048934,0.0,0.0,0.1318027642578195,0.0,0.12614664502529938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21441509797677266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21868178706268615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314082815680804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248499631962335,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisaccountisntreal8,2020/04/15,"Somewhat worrying dreams I don't dream very often but when I do they always contain violence, rape, homicide, etc. What's weird is that I'm always the one doing those things. Just last night I had a pretty short dream. I don't remember any details from it other than the basic storyline. I was walking down a street at night, and a man, held a knife to my throat and demanded my money. I remember he looked in his late teens or early 20s and was a good deal shorter than me. Instead of handing over my wallet or fighting, I just licked the knife really sensually and tempted the man with sex. He began to back away and eventually turned around. Right after that I pretty much pounced on him and began savagely raping him. I don't remember anything after that and I'm pretty sure that's when I woke up. Other dreams I'll just kill a person and the dream ends. Other times there's an in depth story, but it always ends with violent crime done by me. Does it mean anything or do I just have weird dreams and that's it?",2.92784378437844,4.965677009900993,4.091617161716176,85.71573157315734,75.93069306930694,6.865126512651265,23.103410341034106,7.793537801064563,1.16650407040704,804,24,156,12,18,262,118,202,0.24,0.643,0.11699999999999999,-0.9849,0,0,0,0,2,0,20.0,0,0,1,0,11,9,5,0,12,0,12,5,2,0,1,30,21,16,1,0,9,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,15,12,0,2,4,6,1,1,3,7,0,1,8,3,20,2,20,13,3,29,0,0,1,3,11,13,0,5,15,107,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33198817273776804,0.0,0.0,0.09044134876003193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2188875615882798,0.11839399290124325,0.0,0.0,0.12495344039874752,0.10226515847568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13711229047722368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638506288166875,0.13610034304042046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355886801377404,0.0,0.14832488923692938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115501281798511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14713956878168385,0.0,0.0,0.10840890115562107,0.15002446498686872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168253671370376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14487084523034013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776683100896726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496141156762549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090121041438395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612634574961865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4059120272143029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0852001797942808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4519731678723725,0.11357723963004684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534647435761107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835615225937384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0775506153648831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14466067049717435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10973503167166107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13506315923569803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Queen-of-meme,2020/04/15,"Mirror technique - Self healing in quarantine Build up your self worth and self respect by doing this: 

Stand in front of a mirror. Look straight in to your eyes and say out loud *""I'm valuable and I matter""*  repeat this 10 times. Do this every day.

 In the beginning you might laugh or think it's ridiculous, but keep going. You'll soon hit that spot where your old core beliefs was, and it will crush you at first, it will hurt, it will be hard, but keep going. After a few weeks depending on, you'll start to notice that you feel more confident saying it, you're used to the habit of hearing it and looking yourself in your eyes and soon your body will respond to it like it's true, and signal it to your mind and then, it will be your new core belief about yourself.

I did this 2012. When I look in a mirror now, I still hear myself saying ""I'm valuable and I matter"" and as if I really SEE my soul when I look in to my own eyes. And my body responds to ""I'm valuable and I matter"" and I feel it and I agree.

Fun fact: You get *physically* stronger by saying positive things about yourself then if you would tell negative things about you. That's exactly how important it is to brainwash you to the positive side and leave the dark side.",3.4425254668930383,4.835396588709678,4.060203735144313,89.20109507640068,73.03225806451613,6.995246179966045,24.342954159592534,7.475848149327749,0.9665532258064516,966,28,202,11,19,306,127,248,0.059000000000000004,0.74,0.2,0.9895,0,1,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,16,0,1,11,10,1,0,7,0,16,6,5,3,3,40,38,26,0,3,5,0,3,1,0,9,1,7,0,3,21,16,0,2,5,0,1,3,1,2,0,1,2,18,30,8,29,24,3,37,3,1,8,0,28,15,0,5,19,136,51,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756529731536764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002225154508201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045439487802094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12547858937418405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055435933154796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06482742120065013,0.0,0.14103666202340834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115258114101673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2796975588597299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328317274933677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22057853636322608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313843088960388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060619914705877326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4167885717418991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13163077925651276,0.1252868635728562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983860960196377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126752021449104,0.13020257859772208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948973557889752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.394698104970711,0.0,0.0,0.09887682766117634,0.0,0.388331949765821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0878254684272882,0.0,0.0990915830930145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845263106391448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16486836522703893,0.07950636438853896,0.0,0.0,0.07235287442138877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10716650855231873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953063145017126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08814388140843098,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Just_here_for_memes1,2020/04/15,"Is this normal for- anything? I was diagnosed with depression and anxiety in 3rd grade. I have always enjoyed medical stuff and have always been extremely interesting in death and gore. I found murder and road kill fascinating. I have never hurt any animal or person, and I have remorse for people. But I always imagined and dreamed of death. I didn’t want it to happen, but for as long as I can remember, I have had the most grotesque dreams. Example: I had a dream about a man who skinned a bunch of children alive in front of their mother, and hung their skins from hangers in a closet. I had that dream in 3rd grade.",4.684030131826745,6.358869474576273,5.223333333333333,80.9662052730697,70.35593220338984,8.63427495291902,28.365348399246702,9.150863307647796,2.413703201506591,490,18,91,10,9,157,77,118,0.13,0.6940000000000001,0.17600000000000002,0.6896,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,2,0,1,6,2,0,5,0,13,4,2,0,1,18,16,12,4,2,3,1,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,3,5,8,0,0,3,4,0,1,2,4,0,0,7,2,13,2,17,9,2,9,0,2,0,0,7,6,0,2,2,66,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.536859409006847,0.0,0.0,0.1462530687303885,0.0,0.1645258168174078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17698197797855647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18523706138421614,0.2182886775304795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358100804347451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19018321177924388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2302338822023048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23793998830209098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903277013172675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21665757446744624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16587308057392244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2107201896850692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14910051471238858,0.18778838063761133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436292090266485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2462004858555452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12685220481776127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Koshien83,2020/04/15,"I feel soiled by these events that happened and ruined for me happy things forever I'm utterly exhausted and crying, this things are really making me feel hurt, I am terrified of being forced to let go because I can't fix anything of this.

Even worse, what bugs me are problems that can seem irrelevant, so I have been told to focus on something else or to reframe my mindset to devalue this things. But they make me who I am, I desperately want a reset to normalcy, to a world in which these things didn't happened and didn't soil me.

\- I have an item that I dearly love, but an abusive colleague who don't know about this sent me ""humorous"" short videos that mocked and shamed a very similar item, so I feel I can't love my item anymore and I keep crying because she destroyed this connection that made me so happy

\- I put my degree thesis in the hands of a flatmate about to graduate to welcome her in the world of graduate people and she mocked it, so I feel compelled now to throw it away because is soiled, even if I am so proud of it (later in life student here)

\- I always believed I was born at 11:11 daylight saving time because that's what my mother said and it is fundamental for me every year to wait for that exact moment, now she said it was 11:11 standard time and I am desperate to keep celebrating at my precious 11:11 dst time as always, I've been done that for a lifetime and it was a moment full of significance before it was ruined

\- I wanted to celebrate new year 2020 (most important holiday for me, and a palindrome) entirely by myself, but my abusive mother said that my sister visited her on christmas and so I forced myself to go on new year afternoon to get even in being a ""good child"" and now that ritual of new year is ruined forever because I'll never get such a symbolic date again in my life, and I want to make Nature understand that I worship it and I really wanted to dedicate this full symbolic day to celebration and not break it with that visit

\- I wanted to save my wisdom teeth that a dentist wanted to pull because of cavities, she said she could fix them but was so disappointed by my reluctance to pull them that I gave in, and immediately utterly regretted: I wanted to save my body, they were my teeth and part of me, I really wanted to be at their side and fight for them... I'm still crying hard even if time has passed, I want them back like nothing else, I fought so hard to save my tonsils as a child and I wanted exactly the same for my teeth, I just went to that dentist because it was my sister's and I wanted to feel close to her... now I'm regretful to the bone

\- I hate being physically touched, but now that I have to commute with the subway to go to this job I have to be in a line where dirty people from a shady area travel often, and there are a lot of people who don't care about having physical contact... I wanted to live in a secluded garden and just to be accessible by my boyfriend and live in a word where people don't touch me without permission, now I'm completely shamed and I have no clue on how to restore my original purity and exclusive availability... I hate myself for accepting this job

I've been sick for months with this problems, I don't know what to do and I don't want to face the rest of my life with this broken self or even worse to call it normalcy.",6.43362990810359,5.851626150375942,7.211459899749376,76.26103279030914,65.69172932330828,10.57685881370092,32.006056808688385,10.06067010832803,2.9737510442773587,2630,90,516,53,36,879,263,665,0.17600000000000002,0.6940000000000001,0.129,-0.9905,2,0,1,0,1,0,66.0,0,0,7,1,34,38,7,2,24,0,47,16,7,7,3,95,101,46,0,20,13,4,10,1,0,0,7,4,1,3,50,31,0,3,10,4,0,13,13,19,0,0,23,14,86,19,90,70,10,73,2,7,0,2,41,28,0,8,32,376,136,5,0.0,0.1503064939130043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555637505821404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290473667480592,0.0,0.0,0.05219683887242112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059593834822977226,0.04877315056629966,0.0,0.2706610222786019,0.0,0.05397358961053286,0.07146300378220109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045555802533238,0.0,0.0,0.06476831963994162,0.0,0.06467031134267666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06650432443134334,0.0,0.0,0.05064306635856488,0.0,0.20902204059775573,0.04090659587342146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0649101084101295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10597393902364778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20947198924155927,0.0,0.05344184875071197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16035858299378858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0662782930839453,0.0,0.1081448526878359,0.053201415599426885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11218048950366584,0.13504315622667734,0.11364023454055637,0.1252464347157028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790228581207151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12588741586392627,0.11275760018171888,0.0,0.0,0.06971807475454139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06486066911087639,0.1344057897132382,0.03098831018716822,0.0,0.11201831665696152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05392524977128446,0.1144946847453254,0.06001825625115949,0.1270184792990848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05062859372640763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048920520376589914,0.1837809913505815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060862041842847464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06868765798514095,0.0,0.17589532292786458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213863836182992,0.0,0.06376387966594214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12190313668864518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413428318784751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057743574489297865,0.0661705039414733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04883090806053828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05065465249699822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685582062097981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479443398349649,0.0,0.0,0.060609332489429714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06603204906657675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05233574466510403,0.4863585220621834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587995171519306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061143499135160165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12927957661871878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16338533767436542
mentalhealth,Balloon11,2020/04/15,"I feel blank and empty on ADHD meds. Is this normal? I feel blank and empty on ADHD meds. Is this normal?

Hi, I’m a teenager in high school who’s been having trouble with meds for a bit now. I’ve been hopping between different medications for about 4 months now, but recently landed on focalin, the only drug that didn’t seem to give me any physical side effects. However, I feel as if my mental health has been declining. Don’t get me wrong, I realize that depression and anxiety is prevalent in high school, I was was conflicted before the meds, but I don’t recall ever feeling as hollow or empty as I do now. I can deal with bipolar emotions, but it’s hard for me to cope when I can’t easily define them. I don’t necessarily want to live; I don’t necessarily want to die either. I guess I was hoping that medication would help with my lack of motivation and my inability to follow through, but it still is here. I also feel drained of my creativity; my writing is less tasteful, I day dream less, and I feel as if I have no original thoughts.

Looking at what I wrote above, I guess this is more of a mental health thing than an adhd thing. Just looking for some general advice. Thanks",4.221551939924908,5.453140361702129,5.819048811013769,77.96411764705884,70.91489361702128,8.763454317897374,28.7171464330413,9.168548406835145,2.441698372966208,935,35,179,19,17,319,132,235,0.154,0.723,0.12300000000000001,-0.8203,2,0,1,0,0,1,28.0,0,0,1,2,10,5,0,0,6,0,24,7,0,3,1,44,45,18,1,9,9,0,7,0,0,1,6,0,0,0,12,8,1,1,11,1,0,1,7,3,0,0,9,10,28,2,29,35,7,21,0,1,2,0,8,10,0,8,10,127,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3583248543804445,0.09711800312516557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07947825609721194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06758529947421812,0.0,0.07602935581025823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456942933932335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10850282627396612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06409518978064166,0.10246170961123864,0.08560027065452687,0.0,0.10314607864971864,0.10383631243229352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11525520324748288,0.0,0.0,0.11179489936092923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08989954399871547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015126609433603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051924630769785284,0.0953392770173117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21896786070865468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08902955921988782,0.0,0.0,0.2112835008824331,0.0,0.0,0.0666157606600431,0.21001170229669106,0.0,0.09871186339254047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08775889452220305,0.0,0.1669169642718045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4415779183101191,0.2002401341845837,0.200313679745714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07932826611293582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947526605596663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07558687320007397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981308303381651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2011661239255268,0.0,0.09047649374092498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07936909673721028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150047896968448,0.0,0.0,0.1320541343690878,0.0,0.0,0.07890069531057485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723985453430527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706003480006177,0.10866204275997324,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AnxietyNuggets,2020/04/15,"Your feelings are valid Hot take: You’re allowed to feel sad/ bummed out about stuff. Don’t let other people tell you that your feelings are invaild or not as important as someone else’s because they had it worse than you. We’re all human, we’re allowed to have feelings and see things from our own perspective. Stop trying to control other people’s feelings.

Sorry for the unhinged rant, I just saw some nonsense and needed to go off.",6.78819277108434,7.282223722891568,6.096048192771086,80.92334939759041,64.78313253012048,7.60385542168675,33.46746987951808,6.742157984588678,2.1512428915662665,351,14,61,2,5,107,64,83,0.16,0.84,0.0,-0.8832,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,1,4,1,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,3,1,18,16,5,0,1,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,3,0,2,5,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,8,7,0,12,13,3,4,0,1,2,0,8,2,0,2,1,40,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348154474618373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24804673590090864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847485596918036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5591189214116129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12568879956861576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22614834004060405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639853479488045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30664527398756203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1762337479573004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18738587663152464,0.0,0.0,0.2475675094632906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18489741940621549,0.0,0.0,0.2531722160271378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16628277867913893,0.0,0.19330124256938164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1469270940969045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501513007909861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22537819956418506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JorganCrabbypatties,2020/04/15,"Marijuana and medication I’m 18, male and was diagnosed with bipolar 2 recently. I’m taking seroquel and just started on a low dose of Prozac and may get an anxiety medication prescribed on top of all that. I’ve been smoking consistently for 4-5 years and now it’s something I do throughout the day as an  as a means from preventing the dysphoria and major depressive episodes. I’m trying to cut back but it’s imbedded in my lifestyle so much it’s hard to go without it for half a day. To any one with personal experience or a professional background in this area: is there something that can help me go sober or is it ok to keep smoking? Any advice would be appreciated. Thanks.",4.61659090909091,6.234392931818185,6.095878787878789,74.8688181818182,70.43939393939394,9.522424242424243,34.41212121212121,9.888512548439397,3.6334793939393935,545,28,101,14,10,185,92,132,0.07,0.8079999999999999,0.121,0.8946,0,0,2,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,5,5,1,0,8,1,9,6,0,0,1,19,20,12,0,1,5,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,0,2,8,8,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,3,0,2,2,1,3,2,18,15,3,16,0,2,0,0,3,7,0,3,7,64,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896207194813929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639175580278345,0.0,0.1484456093260866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1492103516050076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25028883647531186,0.0,0.16713260556226736,0.1969538664011612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1898154378402316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10138167516359313,0.0,0.2205630393835759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17382821445194974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13006577625857774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17247810500144606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21137433390155366,0.0,0.3909643638800537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14264705054580776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13149143345072167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16943456733630274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915982418630237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2987740950218258,0.0,0.0,0.13734763694559002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14589937682790646,0.0,0.0,0.1786526297576617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13174534001248778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187054617107748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13784559353285225,0.0,0.0,0.12496006203431392
mentalhealth,pablonic_03,2020/04/15,"Several depression getting worse idk if i should be writing this right now and it is quite sad the fact that i have to search for help on internet and support on unknown people.

I attempted to dissapear thrice and you must be asking yourself how is it that I am alive. Well obviously i did it trying to die but actually there's nobody out there that tells you how high should you go or how to cut your veins. Coronavirus only insolates me from the outside world and keeps me inside my mind which is pretty harmful  for a depression. My mind just kills me. My therapist is trying to help me but obviously is not the same. I'm all alone and nobody would care if i die but idk why my mind is always trying to fight. This is the worst could ever happen to a person and i feel like I will never get out of this so the best is to end it right now",2.5591228070175447,4.43552269005848,4.10629239766082,85.92715789473688,76.48538011695906,7.3670175438596495,22.511111111111113,8.238735603445708,1.2102612865497075,664,19,137,12,15,221,101,171,0.19899999999999998,0.662,0.139,-0.9105,0,1,0,0,1,0,7.0,0,4,0,3,11,13,3,0,7,0,19,1,1,3,7,37,29,16,3,7,8,0,1,1,0,5,0,0,0,1,11,8,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,8,1,0,1,1,20,5,16,20,4,14,0,3,0,0,11,8,0,3,6,102,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.13527079352285615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14356604119187824,0.0,0.0,0.11534095764499867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12958875525787514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14547063181188524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413298938572086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11067488379843797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2387822922681987,0.0,0.2877263928037969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122774060382891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12538756610078455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008922964206807,0.09902844974049507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14484396212284034,0.0,0.07877958336805449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12257909653776683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858249268368824,0.14645711775824408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.123209702678202,0.15335984981751305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772156339808141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4198928181718479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691044791213616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10542494030738704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09609999860542508,0.1210355521052405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14102394537862478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14743689318666414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367573665815979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15659844567379175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573016234531643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211579027439894,0.0,0.0,0.16094573153322228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28233677843412924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463388053245635,0.0,0.12508083427831992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14126318910553248,0.09846997446163164,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,memestogenes,2020/04/15,"Things I have been doing to help my welfare in lockdown Hey everyone, one of my friends is a part of this reddit and suggested I share my tips, and the things I have been doing in lockdown here, as it may help some people. (Let me know if not allowed). Wishing all the best for everyone and stay safe :)

[You can see what I have been doing here :)](https://youtu.be/-CglunH-P7E). They involve mostly spending time with my cat, finding small repetitive things that help calm me (for me that's having a cup of tea) and getting as much fresh air as I can ",3.77652777777778,5.893143682692312,3.7801282051282072,88.5426495726496,73.71153846153845,6.545299145299146,25.97863247863248,7.3871296695380915,1.248338888888889,429,15,83,5,9,131,69,104,0.031,0.728,0.24100000000000002,0.9733,1,2,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,1,1,2,5,0,0,4,0,15,1,0,1,1,16,19,8,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,8,5,1,1,2,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,14,5,12,14,6,7,0,0,1,0,10,4,0,4,2,68,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22420716030517449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40829374887018055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1952675842937944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650615334628112,0.0,0.11162065164090053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4296050547222229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11741365948266952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184664032566812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15705359682489606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14477132542229215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313566263475761,0.0,0.14811448554451942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17024733872361467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2277170559307269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4258085703730149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245780696105596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456811116819919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pinkkoreo,2020/04/15,"Feeling alone and unloved I recently got into a series of arguments with my bf who I put a lot of my emotional support and well being into. (yes I know this is very bad and I should be self sufficient without anyone but thats just not how it is for me) I used to be a self harmer and last night we got into an argument so bad that I did something to myself that I regret (you know what I mean). Of course there were other reasons than him being the cause of my stress and my recent newfound depression in quarantine (my grandma died and I cant go to her funeral, my mom has been lashing out and we have been fighting nonstop, I had to move out of my college dorm and away from all of my friends and I have been heavily neglecting school work and getting bad grades) He saw it (it was discreet on my hip under my panties, im not an idiot) and he starts asking me why I would do that to him and talking about how bad it makes him feel and how I'm stupid and how terrible things are for him. I broke down and he decides to leave me to go take a shower but I ask him to not leave me alone and I tell him that I need him, but he leaves anyways. he comes back and continues to talk about himself. I feel like he doesnt care about me and my feelings on it at all. I keep apologizing for doing  it because i know it was stupid but he cant really understand it at all and I feel stuck. Any advice on what to do?",2.0592171717171723,3.4073533097643107,3.6982028619528617,90.58952651515156,76.50841750841751,6.970202020202023,24.49621212121212,7.645422480735847,1.035009090909091,1091,36,246,15,24,364,157,297,0.251,0.7090000000000001,0.04,-0.9971,1,3,1,0,2,0,20.0,2,1,0,1,13,20,4,1,7,1,26,1,1,8,3,66,55,28,2,4,9,1,5,1,2,2,0,0,2,2,19,28,0,2,12,0,0,5,7,15,1,0,12,6,49,5,40,37,4,26,0,4,1,0,32,14,0,1,8,181,68,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041139420572098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22069570603206468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07245383684741946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07449831279901846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19920923916282726,0.0,0.1001019589855507,0.08192605715149219,0.35584045174441675,0.06494846951774537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862910354464078,0.1094504346395225,0.0,0.09177855547371637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917665245600332,0.0,0.1105762527069762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11984809509885135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693602173028157,0.07611533149238837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231592924310678,0.0,0.05566504484590865,0.0,0.12110326110537242,0.0,0.17042655889111036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508622126669478,0.0,0.0,0.0947015467474799,0.0,0.0,0.17566202645864573,0.08684789584438986,0.0,0.33844536669646386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05205220581293119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09058022791997623,0.0,0.0,0.0711192057756375,0.0,0.0,0.11605807220010672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247834985694642,0.0,0.11323982213887827,0.0,0.07900131307745506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09998468985688462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10710653687650787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06825506265463444,0.1095453749671514,0.21039945746590824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078286079629486,0.0,0.0,0.22229806459941676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08202307454157215,0.0,0.0,0.07541266562935416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204623554266394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090530796759898,0.0,0.0,0.08010811954932094,0.17127268517670316,0.09312449053224167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07078335659557852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091646454753376,0.0,0.09202014200257053,0.0,0.0879102776571875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09579619954437567,0.0,0.09613973751368976,0.0,0.0,0.10270498719946414,0.0,0.0775655828070343,0.0,0.0,0.07568607574727282,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_ericforeskin,2020/04/15,"Deep rooted insecurities have led me to believe I’m unlovable? I don’t actually think insecurities is the right word but anyways does anyone else feel like no matter what they’re not loved? I struggle so hard with this. My relationships with family, so, friends, etc. suffer because of this and I find it extremely difficult to form new relationships with other people because it doesn’t seem genuine or real. For instances my boyfriend and I have been together for one year and I still struggle to form a connection/bond with his family. I struggle with bonding with new people in general. Now this might be because I didn’t have my biological dad growing up and my mom/stepdad weren’t the most loving people and I was basically taught showing emotion is wrong but I don’t know. It all just sucks and hurts because I just don’t feel loved? Any advice or similar feelings or stories would help. I’m just tired of feeling alone and unlovable. I haven’t had the easiest life and I’ve experienced plenty of traumas and I’m sure that’s why I feel like this. It’s just hard to deal with and it’s hard to figure out.",2.9425477448191804,5.637696261682245,4.249910605444942,81.16491873222269,79.37383177570094,6.899309223892728,27.52864689150752,8.04050195162591,2.1061075172694026,896,39,162,17,23,294,122,214,0.237,0.604,0.159,-0.9677,1,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,0,9,20,1,5,4,0,18,5,0,2,2,49,34,17,0,1,10,1,8,2,1,2,2,0,0,0,12,18,0,0,10,1,0,2,9,13,0,1,6,9,18,7,20,25,5,12,0,2,0,3,10,5,1,6,7,104,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.10707790845599646,0.0,0.0,0.10722413948578853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136442761647309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746182514551161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07672380206897272,0.11242847243553604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675547046766331,0.0,0.0,0.12362496729210876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131239141021937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602300282768128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166298680603027,0.12342831912870975,0.0,0.0,0.12237482118383138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2068820572751536,0.0,0.2774068193107992,0.1567782519744043,0.0,0.0,0.10028866317878476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477495429205073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29488202708971983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07354782206300835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11746522561744754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060303193645952186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750355884754807,0.10721432435171556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29709921723762994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640320784308653,0.0,0.12851115798482418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21195040643100507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435398325703521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22821305143495896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489356380492125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23561187418831114,0.0,0.0937064201550041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09989151210779154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08762827514527492,0.0,0.0,0.3441320478675665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10341657738259917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030875233772023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12611526262177172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901172140452164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794704707846141,0.11996945627774125,0.0,0.07066071238610007
mentalhealth,Spiritual_Control,2020/04/15,"Rumination of perceived bad decisions I have convinced myself that all my life I've made the wrong decision. When there was a fork in the road, I chose the path that was wrong at the time (investments, career, real estate).

I can't seem to convince myself otherwise, I've tried to write down positive things that have come out of my decisions, but it seems to gravitate towards the negative over and over again. I get a sick feeling that I'm somehow getting dopamine or pleasure out of this depressive behaviour, which is enabling me to continue it rather than curtail it.

It's taking a toll on my family, SO, and child. I can't seem to concentrate on anything else (OCD?) and I get agitated and frustrated with my SO when they try and comfort me about it.",7.302674825174828,7.2557848881118945,7.472159090909091,73.32823863636366,63.75524475524476,11.625524475524475,37.45541958041958,11.20814326018867,4.325797902097902,601,28,109,16,8,195,93,143,0.18899999999999997,0.721,0.09,-0.9487,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,1,9,9,1,0,8,0,7,2,0,1,1,26,18,11,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,12,9,0,1,8,0,1,1,3,5,0,0,3,1,15,4,21,15,1,17,0,1,0,0,3,11,0,5,5,80,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.163676041646387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16607145592588132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17133294717422182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713104877675783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661536908342443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875032583020025,0.0,0.10056876498823693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117478632827047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14048748359639945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882020218450184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22638937820717675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.543207591135289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495464833165812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13213894066874313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11597897713384912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700772644896777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4349273058296817,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deandrersmith17,2020/04/15,Is there a way I could talk to a professional or someone online about issues I am having? I’m just really going through a lot and kicking myself down lately. Last night I couldn’t even sleep because I just thought if I shot myself in the head and died I could sort of start my life over. I don’t want to ever think like that and I don’t want to think that’s my only option. My birthday is coming up in 2 days and I want to be happy that I made it to 25. I saw one time that you could talk to people on hotlines or text them? If you have any information please let me know.,2.4376792114695327,3.2476466209677466,4.057526881720431,90.5118458781362,74.7258064516129,6.478853046594982,21.035842293906807,6.42735559955562,0.12195089605734788,447,9,103,3,9,150,81,124,0.032,0.856,0.113,0.7319,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,2,1,0,6,2,0,0,4,0,13,3,2,1,1,28,26,8,1,9,6,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,5,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,3,1,20,2,15,17,1,16,0,0,1,0,6,6,0,7,8,72,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578953954120755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037951019102412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14667265586552974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4078405748235007,0.0,0.0,0.10981015944655123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17671353157039876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11246182698447044,0.15401909713438042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676844905991427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18125573884592036,0.0,0.0,0.17474629492126514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1777177970754065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935760204636949,0.13879289638065334,0.19207214353731852,0.0,0.0,0.17411276261936526,0.12026684111139375,0.08318539369938324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475759102280353,0.0,0.16111373112143906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15978699960472076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153794589995913,0.1294981203203059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11804388170295765,0.0,0.0,0.1869054914819216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907941690900083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17039311519558348,0.0,0.1442693439638265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205180872227192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737133906981351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182044714301127,0.0,0.13517547825585433,0.09928589265140828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30128923474513625,0.13515251816330984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,orange-is-the-new-me,2020/04/15,I can’t feel anything I’m 18 and my family has no history of mental illness as far as I can tell. I’m writing this because I just can’t feel anything. I get I should feel attached to them and I should get happy sad etc.. but I feel nothing. I get panicked or excited sometimes but then when I stop I can’t feel anything at all. I can’t even cry. I’ve not cried in at least a year and I’ve tried but nothing helps. I’m just numb. I’m starting to wonder if it just me or if it’s completely normal?,-0.7818503118503095,1.1810684864864882,2.091351351351353,95.27656964656963,89.36036036036036,4.8568260568260575,22.051975051975045,6.297961479604792,0.3218199584199581,386,15,91,4,13,135,63,111,0.172,0.721,0.107,-0.7077,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,1,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,0,1,26,22,14,0,5,11,0,5,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,6,0,0,0,6,2,0,0,0,5,14,2,8,20,3,9,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,5,5,55,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4112085833272152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153701508275084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1746411572380706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3659295980162442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18576498707894795,0.11001519351684554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702348867522914,0.0,0.4211035710317453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610713942946765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731247766343264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164559901334233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16785923139050274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16319919814912465,0.3196489103585968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647379154423284,0.0,0.11789618792088802,0.0,0.0,0.13925653488874126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14558592173079968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11308729956502002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806335927797856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726296632274407
mentalhealth,xxxtentacleslol,2020/04/15,Suicide What’s the easiest way to kill myself,0.706666666666667,2.4502824444444467,3.2094444444444434,80.06750000000002,113.44444444444444,6.2444444444444445,26.722222222222207,7.1686216300943375,2.7296222222222224,38,2,6,1,2,13,9,9,0.541,0.294,0.165,-0.8126,0,0,0,0,0,2,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6334391642170201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6262742201194212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4544616886491685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,H3win,2020/04/15,"A quest about if i'm cured or need to change my meds! Have  been emotional low (Flat lined) for over 1 year now. but for the first  time in over a year I feel sad and angry AND really happy to. Is that  what I'm supposed to feel after a long time in depression or should my  mood be more ""stable""? social anxiety is totally gone, And I feel a bit  confused and different about it.

Also my body have hard to to adjust my temprature. Can feel that after I run and when i wake up in the morning.

I take atm: 80mg atomoxetin (strattera) 10mg escitalopram, mirtazapin 30mg.

Soo thankful for all answear.",2.664249999999999,4.322016925000003,4.528333333333336,83.97000000000001,75.58333333333334,8.133333333333335,24.5,8.841846274778883,1.7491499999999998,461,15,96,10,10,157,80,120,0.174,0.735,0.092,-0.8641,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,5,7,0,1,6,0,8,2,2,0,2,19,18,11,0,3,4,0,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,5,0,1,2,0,4,0,1,2,5,9,2,18,14,4,19,0,3,0,0,1,7,0,4,10,61,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16650964046163258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15928407745901368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273170987779493,0.23128017656703898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22026410003403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17933546846662254,0.0,0.0,0.2175405941068385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342141034808856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4211194963555171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17710776428966893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22164897909861397,0.1865199442477598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842639222564129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23128017656703898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15438895128860694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13338800499500048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122492010512506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655193673548531,0.0,0.0,0.1916966048761077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428239446121631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2681675570024289
mentalhealth,mjatin2007,2020/04/15,"Fighting depression? You have a fighter in you!  Fighting depression can be hard. Here are some yoga poses which my doc recommended. Maybe it can help you guys as well!

[https://afitindian.com/6-essential-yoga-poses-for-depression/](https://afitindian.com/6-essential-yoga-poses-for-depression/)",20.20075268817205,27.218487193548388,11.166935483870967,24.2037365591398,64.16129032258064,7.227956989247312,27.747311827956988,7.793537801064563,3.0937053763440865,257,7,22,4,6,65,26,31,0.33,0.48200000000000004,0.188,-0.8011,0,0,0,0,5,0,31.0,0,3,0,0,2,5,2,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,4,1,2,4,1,1,0,2,0,0,7,1,0,1,0,17,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7889482492185284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3023275413166327,0.0,0.0,0.2735182740979385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20465818367644045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30674790302969906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2745309151845856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,khalihan,2020/04/15,"I am struggling with mental clarity I am really struggling with my mental clarity recently and was hoping to share my concern hoping maybe someone can relate or have some advice. This really having an effect on my well-being and my relationships. I made a list of the things I have trouble with, they seem minor but are very severe to me.

* Lack of focus, I have a really short attention span
* Serious lack of concentration in everyday life, ie listening to people or driving
* Can't multitask at all, ie cooking
* Lack of consciousness in everday life, I feel like I am dreaming all the time and catch myself staring into space alot
* My memory is horrendous

I am constantly asking myself questions like do I have mental health condition I have never known about? Is it my diet making me like this? Does this happen when you get older(I'm only 25)? along with the thousands of other questions I ask myself.

I have been like this for years, I have tried meditation, changing job due to stress, really trying to be more present with everday life and more but it seems like I just end up back to square one. I am positive, nice, easy going person and I believe my days of stress are behind me. I wasnt like this when I was younger.

Is it me or is everyone else like this and I am overreacting? What have you found to help with mental clarity?",4.437027129576934,6.555009466135459,5.525611838360842,76.73520584329353,71.86852589641434,8.605653576171505,27.09182318345665,9.23628265651192,2.592203035477139,1060,38,180,24,21,350,141,251,0.114,0.701,0.185,0.9637,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,2,1,1,5,17,0,4,7,0,29,6,0,3,3,42,43,13,0,5,6,0,1,7,0,0,4,1,0,1,12,14,2,0,10,2,0,3,3,6,0,2,6,4,36,11,29,36,9,25,0,0,2,0,12,9,0,11,20,139,48,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014037638458725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1940236460634948,0.0,0.0,0.0797934492543602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691431657891024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10977589745003112,0.0,0.0,0.11213952335691024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692367304747843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908106509336948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08668730672087117,0.0,0.09191025405755862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915758240308548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05246970641038397,0.07413398193551507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11377948209806822,0.0,0.0,0.0542160343801288,0.0,0.05897541792887969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917643015942979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030365914957604,0.0,0.0,0.06955547524672871,0.0,0.0,0.20613592047074197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10297664814420902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198894563187359,0.3548806852503571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09819057470978997,0.0692679098003604,0.0,0.1042518593339021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4183068107331925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08003454800116012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031787613642428,0.07892247774029944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194170543199285,0.09060878421138993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324944090125603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26591329145572346,0.0,0.10246128653187042,0.1114111568721965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889383370678047,0.0,0.1172316276093668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0879247826874234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23773852766895603,0.21696784002253125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06894080307219698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060509670976883125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14090731627807612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08562189519513258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933025395445322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0668250845970267
mentalhealth,Jazzlike_Pilot,2020/04/15,"Obsession with weight taking over my life All I think about all day is how much I weigh. I take about 5 videos of myself a day to check how fat I look (I don't own a full length mirror). I have to wear clothes that are about three sizes too big and hide my entire body in order to feel comfortable; if I wear any clothes that are even slightly form fitting, I feel physically ill. I can't focus on my studies. I can't even focus on fun things. I know everyone is concerned with their appearance to an extent, but this can't be normal. Does anyone else experience this? Sorry if this is disorganized and doesn't make sense.

Side note: This obsession is making me feel like a vain and horrible person as well, so I end up feeling ugly inside and out.",3.2832000000000012,4.8812295200000015,4.310333333333337,86.42350000000002,73.8,7.4,23.166666666666664,8.07648339933343,1.121666666666666,588,16,121,9,12,191,99,150,0.165,0.755,0.08,-0.9179999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,1,0,10,7,0,2,4,0,13,8,4,4,2,24,25,11,0,3,3,0,5,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,7,7,3,0,6,1,1,1,5,3,1,1,0,6,18,4,17,24,7,15,0,0,1,0,2,10,0,3,4,80,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12895236819670186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13259109910663416,0.19429452567674665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21063204111117964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24458651737967765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16594322936441736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15840841877312858,0.0,0.16795259381139616,0.0,0.0,0.2504927298068081,0.0,0.0,0.1811960300994932,0.0,0.18549088141540165,0.0,0.0,0.3835229650275001,0.1354690473147809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10421364048107387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339386445295553,0.09264181859098704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15923831071625555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531540193889304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393971293279132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18579348606243573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165574347350512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122710876831873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851507160186332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597926982298358,0.1215048589601169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309137148891788,0.17049679261990705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CptKidd710,2020/04/15,As anyone ever put things off simply because of their depression I haven't taken a shower since the night I lost my cat.  which was the 23rd of March 2020 the 5th anniversary of losing my cousin to suicide.  And I constantly at battle with my state of Mind and my appearance. I've been single for 4 years running. I'm 19 and should have been earning my 600 a week checks for roofing. Everything's in shambles atm and I can only sit and wallow cuz nothing I can do will change the situation im.in.,3.679183673469388,5.4833072755102075,4.599744897959184,83.90329081632655,73.18367346938777,7.348979591836735,25.51530612244898,8.07648339933343,1.5758530612244894,395,13,75,6,8,128,73,98,0.162,0.838,0.0,-0.9403,1,1,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,1,3,1,4,1,0,6,0,10,0,0,1,1,11,14,7,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,4,0,0,5,0,11,0,12,7,1,14,0,3,0,0,2,3,0,1,6,49,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16399616683943394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297370830038986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481127438383459,0.0,0.0,0.2534549521261909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020093839255444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21215530464455945,0.0,0.0,0.21078987287290885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533439810199508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623908198055132,0.2560286552681132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368190391002244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201003655397515,0.0,0.22504792971756005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17837861459142115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23577797712789544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19401432042558084,0.2636333422726466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25654923312442235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558182826102417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881342371330206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15103638851274254
mentalhealth,llkey123,2020/04/15,"How can I explain my lack of motivation to SO I've struggled with depression and anxiety for several years now and the recent pandemic has sent me into a decline. I've lost all motivation to do my studies and many days can't even get out of bed, go to the toilet, shower, no matter how much I know I ought to. My SO doesn't seem to realise how out of my control it is and says that I'm being lazy and just can't be arsed to get up and that in turn it's damaging our relationship. I've tried to explain that it's not as simple as that but he doesn't seem to get it. Any advice about how I can make him realise that it's not something I have control over? Thanks in advance",3.841417624521071,3.854613310344829,5.667126436781611,83.12773946360153,71.06896551724137,8.651340996168582,29.214559386973185,8.515128840125781,1.9473295019157093,530,19,117,8,9,184,86,145,0.106,0.835,0.06,-0.5247,1,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,6,10,5,0,1,3,0,13,0,0,9,1,32,28,15,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,10,10,0,2,7,0,0,3,7,4,0,0,2,1,12,1,23,23,3,14,0,3,0,0,8,7,0,2,4,83,22,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18855373423896055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312162543035253,0.0,0.14761031413847212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4328316633261464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12444023755635936,0.0,0.166192159686142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12744518846438313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3024336183479027,0.0,0.10966097171398274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060432138043549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21063355738082604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12879919403817144,0.19562643873803154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14184438352595286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19052012921213332,0.2071618337171845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15344583849258964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35131860637029066,0.0,0.21798462224986803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485464549029921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20171882627646104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776473613460952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13100401631148606,0.20988001160885167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12425691871512025
mentalhealth,Cockwombles,2020/04/15,"I sometimes hear voices and intrusive thoughts in my head even though I should be better? I have OCD and bipolar related auditory noises. It’s been quite bad recently, just with the stress of the world. I can hear the whispery voices calling me the f-got word a lot. So much that sometimes I end up saying it to myself and not realising. 

I’m around my parents so I can’t be doing that. I can’t go to the doctors or anything, what can I do to cope.",2.28967391304348,4.0592988369565255,4.158043478260872,85.73423913043482,76.93478260869566,6.773913043478261,26.71739130434783,7.645422480735847,1.5139956521739135,351,14,72,5,8,119,65,92,0.078,0.888,0.034,-0.5709,1,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,2,6,3,0,1,6,0,11,3,1,0,0,12,16,7,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,5,12,1,8,11,2,7,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,2,2,54,17,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632424173479534,0.1765922326553089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16563148549501472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17544301470666018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20255895364528187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20304110759743302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756978120019303,0.0,0.0,0.13102216390557644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273880154345435,0.0,0.15865539726333894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2035858593887844,0.0,0.4471570317686919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686479165964927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582549793644572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202675018648243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21099195921738087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19586741482923792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15775256833037166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3923879505832574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2272332916947301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948984843796385,0.1574844028676405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_seekingwisdom,2020/04/15,"What are ways that helps you to change your thoughts into more positive ones? My goal during this quarantine and from every day now on is to slowly and surely focus more on the positive and what I’m grateful for in my life.

I’m curious as to what ways you do that helps you to focus more on the positive and be more thankful?",5.30318181818182,5.479988257575759,6.041969696969698,81.13295454545455,67.93939393939394,9.630303030303034,28.62121212121212,9.516144504307137,2.345466666666667,259,8,52,5,4,85,41,66,0.0,0.6509999999999999,0.349,0.9825,0,1,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,4,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,1,7,8,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,6,2,12,6,4,9,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,0,2,40,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3364434988851647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.205109092627455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267961898846593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4263501916580913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2246406232160608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155117182465403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997483565857443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2928079358323047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2524877464005114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5048897207053957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_Used_to_be_me,2020/04/15,"I'm really struggling. Days bleed together, and the line between work and recreation/relaxation has blurred in a way that I have no motivation to do anything left. Meh, just need to vent. Comments, discussion, advice, whatever, is more than welcome, but writing is cathartic for me so it's fine if no one reads or comments, too. 

Malaise. This is generally what I feel. I have a history of anxiety and depression, but I've been fine for almost 7 years now. Before that, I struggled bad with addiction. But everything's been great about 7 years now, until recently.

I haven't really even left the house for about a month. I'm fortunate enough that I can work from home, but I keep putting off work because of anxiety, lack of motivation, malaise, and the inability to compartmentalize work vs play at home any more. Then, as work piles up, naturally, so does my anxiety. I've no motivation to get my work done, I made up an excuse to avoid a Zoom meeting yesterday because I just couldn't. Then I stress about the work I'm avoiding, but I can't motivate myself to do it.

At the same time, I can't even motivate myself to do things I enjoy. Video games, music, playing guitar, walks, even cooking and eating. Just... no motivation at all. I'm not at like, a suicidal depression point, but I'm really struggling with the anxiety and lack of motivation. I know if I just did my work, that'd alleviate a lot of my anxiety, but I just can't. I'm also in school, and have been pushing off my work more and more, just adding to the pile of no motivation. My only social contact is with my fiancee, who I live with, and... I love her, but she's not helping at all. I struggle to open up to her, and share my feelings (which she knows), but then when I finally do open up about this, she offers no help, no comfort, no anything. Try and tell her I just don't even feel loved right now, and she takes it as me implying I just want to have sex. As much as that'd help, and is one of the few things I could find motivation for, that's not what I meant, and just meant that like... there isn't even any physical contact. It feels... cold. Sounds lame, but I just want to lay on her stomach and cuddle while we talk. Closest I can get is us in the same room watching something on TV, while she's on facebook or talking to friends, feeling like we aren't even in the same room together. I SWEAR I love her lol, but as I said... rough patch and all, right now, and feel like our relationship isn't even helping me get through this.

Then, my friends live out of state. Gaming online with them has been my social contact and outlet for a while, but they're too busy with everything going on, so I've lost that, as well. I don't know what's wrong with me and why I can't just sit down for a few hours and get some work done to relieve anxiety. It sounds so simply, but I end up just putting it all off, literally lay down and stare at a wall, and wait until I can go to bed. Rinse and repeat until I'm forced to get some work done, and then climb back into my apathetic metality. I should be working right now. Instead, downloading Animal Crossing PRAYING it can give me some relief, but I'll likely play for 10 minutes before becoming disinterested. 

I'm not going to go back to drugs, and don't like drinking anyway, but all I can think about is how it feels like that's the only thing that could make me feel ok, if even just for a bit -- quell the anxiety, allow me to get some work done and forget about feeling like my heart's about to pop out of its chest. 

meh... I'm sorry for the rant, and I know plenty are in the same boat, or have it way worse than I do right now, but... I needed to at least get this out since I've no one else to talk to.",5.0269344577600235,5.037521017310257,5.845430980914338,82.87846752478178,68.52063914780292,9.338671401094835,29.6050007397544,9.150863307647796,2.174929492528481,2888,97,621,50,45,950,288,751,0.166,0.685,0.149,-0.7536,0,2,3,0,0,0,129.0,4,0,1,24,50,40,0,7,25,2,52,14,3,13,5,145,103,73,1,13,40,0,10,8,3,1,3,3,5,0,32,42,3,4,26,11,0,10,25,13,1,3,14,16,74,27,99,82,26,88,1,4,2,5,49,43,0,13,39,420,106,24,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05518509228783906,0.0,0.04946691000483184,0.0,0.0,0.050690290172805054,0.0,0.0,0.040482131172268766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06884894291807048,0.0,0.27107807269482304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331464225092892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07784987900922406,0.04226697994214701,0.06171700029993036,0.05590765732041337,0.08615062533558784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055265752691051696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083456866931482,0.0,0.0,0.03264678929338534,0.0,0.08720074030763304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04429936450924078,0.2072141753211158,0.0,0.04958996468286344,0.05870506582887609,0.0517986060756263,0.042287909614877,0.0,0.04483577427063663,0.05230571708674122,0.0,0.26748108463667103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09099098569918067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23036253605287185,0.14465652451630254,0.0,0.05545356506577793,0.0462672892481209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07822035326633553,0.0,0.18513413252627547,0.048560918515416086,0.11507784644441413,0.0,0.0,0.0558105698333217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05998692262808409,0.1357225532418257,0.0,0.10155532480298088,0.0,0.04985214794476399,0.058410610530196326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04499486617941924,0.0,0.0,0.1112813837404079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11000118504177564,0.0,0.0,0.19784952751756416,0.0,0.08939972400088303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055259532615514535,0.04303673354595005,0.1370641006034626,0.047899448090255495,0.03379035777730362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040405733997542576,0.0,0.03721275201941522,0.07507065369052351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1029076609777043,0.0770001221980607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04785384047526494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10177752020354934,0.0,0.0,0.050635368895764685,0.0,0.09728861404140303,0.0,0.04998279203477146,0.05434872889834523,0.0,0.17292251819085644,0.04815280037103272,0.0,0.0,0.05123183255436154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04187476849498388,0.0,0.0,0.1032048351596294,0.0,0.038971034680811895,0.0,0.056666815055166575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05798695189833505,0.21168304231094207,0.0,0.05537189069902479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03806119586006162,0.12206334238021252,0.044245570779299984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089236450088668,0.03243632209240517,0.0,0.0,0.02951790283825147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03436879100436705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060891636071573677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059715945000986835,0.08036225072773237,0.0,0.0,0.04551496070586438,0.0,0.045678183435457737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4790913221500532,0.0,0.05158780641231056,0.0,0.05534684937066989,0.0,0.06519739150611313
mentalhealth,Oh-no-oh-hullo,2020/04/15,"Clinical psychologists are creating a tool to enable anybody to host or participate in an effective programme of psychological support around coronavirus issues, immediately and for free In the UK a group of psychologists and health technology workers are putting a free tool together to support the many people who are struggling with their mental health during the coronavirus pandemic. 

It's at [www.helpers.tools](https://www.helpers.tools) 

Does this seem like something that would be useful?",14.729109589041094,16.326709,11.894623287671235,42.28933219178083,48.04109589041096,14.971232876712325,48.38698630136986,13.816669648895859,7.735578082191777,419,22,46,14,4,126,56,73,0.033,0.7020000000000001,0.265,0.9578,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,3,1,6,0,1,7,0,5,3,0,2,0,9,9,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,7,11,7,0,5,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,2,1,31,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19977600624361952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963861719598119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4770830987515257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23422987355671795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10963732709169792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275205360586013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261564927130372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15558038609771965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255980171021197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20429804418146305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727648331542371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23460620038680816,0.0,0.0,0.5093246132317811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19382161140333407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594172410831689,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,strike555,2020/04/15,"Some mental health disorders that I found from searching my psychiatric prescription and history.I would like to know the extent of the damage they can cause to me or others. Hello as the title says I looked at my psychiatric prescription and files and found out that I have been diagnosed with the following disorder
-Severe conduct disorder 
-OCD
-Impulse control disorder.
 Manic depression 

My psychiatrist never talked about this disorders to me .I take medications that I don’t know.It is under the supervision of my parents so I don’t know much about them.My parents didn’t talk about them to me until I found them out by checking the files.I had a history of physical as emotional abuse from my parents especially my mother.When I try to confront them they threaten me with dire consequences like sending me to a mental asylum.I am forced to take the medications and it’s like I have developed a dependence on them.I cannot sleep if I skip them or if their doses are reduced.My mood is also altered and I become angry and depressed most of time.Most of the time I am overwhelmed by random thoughts and sometimes I laugh uncontrollably and sometimes I cry .

What should I do to reduce these problems?Most of my  family don’t give much importance to mental problems and they threaten me with dire consequences and often fights break out where I am blamed for my problems if I try to open out or say to them so I remain mostly to myself but these problems have been aggravating .Please help.Thank you.",6.592212790039612,8.00084171684588,6.758347481607249,72.76278438030562,65.52329749103943,10.17475947934352,33.680626296925105,10.307518312809881,3.7454329749103934,1225,53,203,30,19,393,142,279,0.17300000000000001,0.774,0.053,-0.977,3,0,0,0,2,0,20.0,0,1,9,1,8,15,2,2,11,0,21,6,1,3,1,45,32,23,0,8,7,3,0,3,0,2,5,2,0,0,9,18,0,1,6,0,1,2,6,10,0,0,8,3,43,4,39,22,6,15,0,4,1,0,21,9,0,12,6,151,52,1,0.0,0.1081995915830608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07302878991868163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10085606767894112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938110764605612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242345212257588,0.0,0.0,0.1003110326363103,0.0,0.0,0.15730803592282194,0.0926881555718631,0.0,0.0,0.5233047266313122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10272301658737394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08608862678809047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3003838999074611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08760272776720486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706918065963993,0.0,0.0,0.06121005454076792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15056170265201088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13384341895599414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07668603034495436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18399113683078866,0.27608807152414955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13426181729204476,0.0,0.07043182482643051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3042010708954241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10024223760561587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26214350669731873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452430940146968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1031659160464125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09138622415194726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1806361715691504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13732296181196618,0.1467995537672853,0.0,0.08407543879627527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07249809677789355,0.1064991719947491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12400094290175835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06487130235993929,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Astralacer123,2020/04/15,"Why must I be so hard on myself? I've survived a whole  lot of shit in my short life. I have many comorbid disorders. I know that they have affected my performance in socially, educational and other aspects. Yet I feel that it's an excuse when I didn't do aswell at something ,but looking at an outsider's perspective, I'd be like 'damn. She's amazing and a warrior.She's a miracle"".

My low self esteem  makes hard for me to compliment myself. When I was younger,  people thought I was a snob but I was really misunderstood.My autism made me blind to how I seemed to others. Now, I feel like a narcissist when I compliment myself. It makes me so sad that I can't even compliment myself. I'm going to stop  because I'm starting to ramble.",2.021632653061225,4.339498918367351,4.125877551020409,82.93697959183675,80.22448979591837,7.729523809523809,26.126530612244892,8.648137234880735,2.2102946938775507,579,24,113,14,15,198,89,147,0.16699999999999998,0.655,0.17800000000000002,0.5619,0,0,1,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,1,2,9,11,3,0,7,0,11,3,1,5,1,17,24,10,0,1,2,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,0,1,7,2,0,1,5,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,6,6,24,6,12,15,2,15,0,2,2,0,5,7,2,2,9,76,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585393743356774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366169815815101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363625400089496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087811718258182,0.14749253120985406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11733395997878203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3698888592520363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11346306721587328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14582629833202895,0.20172838874578744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17337142305686812,0.0,0.0,0.1755218933102695,0.0,0.1953540876503113,0.2756225709542424,0.20931443862769505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14313090915510407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13226129035286324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18795020076589852,0.21537910686297407,0.0,0.2119245820517296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104563540661312,0.0,0.15894026399872946,0.0,0.0,0.14613093999423887,0.0,0.0,0.17260683913959582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16390336219985274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18629483650298587,0.2305012566874637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HEE_hee69,2020/04/15,"Should I Be Worried About My OCD? I'm a male in Highschool. I've had OCD since May of 2018. As of now, I haven't got checked out by a therapist. Anyways, I first noticed my OCD symptoms when I started having obsessive thoughts. At first it was about normal thoughts that almost everyone has (ex: sexuality) but then these thoughts kept coming back and it scared me. When summer break started I ignored these thoughts which worked for awhile but more thoughts kept coming. That summer was the lowest point for me, the thoughts were worse and more severe. For example, the scariest one was I thought I would become a serial killer or kill someone in my family, now I know that no matter how tough I try to act deep down I'm a kind person. I was unhappy the whole summer and the only time I felt at peace was when I was sleeping. Summer ended and the thoughts went away but I had to move out my hometown. Soon after, my compulsions came and it has stayed so far, but it didn't interfere with my social life or emotional health. School distracted me from my compulsions and I was happy again. Then summer of 2019 it started getting worse. One time I almost stayed up all night because my brain kept telling me to close and open my door, but I managed to control myself and saved my summer, now I cope with my compulsions and learned to accept it. Some of the compulsions are, twisting doorknobs multiple times, turning the sink handle on and off, closing my door twice, putting down my toilet seat multiple times till I get it right, and placing down cups and plates till I feel like I got it right. Now we're in quarantine and I feel like my compulsions are getting worse since we're all self isolating. I've heard that if you don't treat your OCD it will get worse and I don't want it to become unbearable. No matter how messed up life is, I love it and I want to do many things and I don't want my OCD to interfere. Should I seek help and tackle it while it's weak or?",4.449282013323465,5.755165730569949,4.582283493708363,86.76374352331608,70.45077720207254,7.794078460399705,28.03441894892672,8.192908349453996,1.7377693560325689,1556,55,312,22,28,484,191,386,0.175,0.727,0.098,-0.9848,1,1,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,2,0,4,16,16,1,3,12,0,28,8,2,3,2,75,64,38,1,8,9,1,3,2,0,5,5,1,2,3,21,27,0,7,14,0,1,7,7,8,0,5,28,4,48,8,40,30,6,67,0,0,0,1,11,24,0,8,35,205,69,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16214284769744858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07606615990812766,0.062254531550449924,0.0,0.049353486367215836,0.1788316211077491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903800063002257,0.0,0.0925985891639409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1394826304609761,0.0,0.0,0.09080540419660192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09107098860862088,0.07170801443607842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736235116871963,0.0,0.0,0.0763234629395966,0.0,0.08187331225036876,0.11567807534307885,0.07773590566159247,0.0,0.0,0.1377319208741764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691965370289378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12950489693288014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618520981700703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605847588775747,0.0,0.0,0.05426690497425009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08957209927188768,0.08430912706919311,0.04449441992211774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11437125247686925,0.07910757094191774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307107374730185,0.0,0.0,0.08208243225386815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08604944904252279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597704864213647,0.07932525290830296,0.0,0.09217540499172924,0.0,0.0,0.10972345422845466,0.06157500304142668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069261284161933,0.08458771983999394,0.0,0.07653495315836258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0813888463704315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13828165825691785,0.0,0.0,0.0810567617791249,0.0819375386765847,0.0,0.0,0.08446068538742245,0.09146364930851918,0.0,0.13394467041521707,0.0,0.08102014577860273,0.08253023316635942,0.06859856553426973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191527341703575,0.1725887491225952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08415018126919982,0.0,0.0,0.07076407355035788,0.0,0.0,0.0940027462170486,0.05378734018992065,0.0,0.0,0.5141962193207454,0.18883761793174375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05496766369228848,0.08806305500144777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325988284535635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07505228498024019,0.0,0.09039082019627492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05894106454019193,0.08222051217905077,0.3300274592882197,0.057512851885763175,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,concerningpickle,2020/04/15,"How/If I should quit my job? Anxiety/ Stress induced pain. (21F) Hello everyone, thank you for taking the time to read.

 I have never felt so helpless. To start, I work at a grocery that is known for being extremely physically demanding. It is an extremely stressful job that has no separation between home and work life. There's only a few of us employees, and we are all struggling to keep above water during this crisis. My issues started way before the virus affected how stores run.

I have severe anxiety and paranoia. I also deal with health issues including: food allergies(severe and stressful), celiac Disease, GERD, stomach ulcers, hernias, and other pain I deal with weekly if not daily. I have struggled to find a job that caters to these issues. I would love to own my own business someday and would like to work on that and grow as a person. I am an artist, the business runs in the family. I would love to make and sell art as a means of income. Though the stress and pain reduces the urge to be creative and do what I love. I have also been so stressed I haven't been eating as much because I get nauseated. I've had several people concerned about my health even customers! Everyone has been noticing I lost a bunch of weight (at least 10lbs, all of my pants are HUGE on me. I never tried to lose weight at all, I just worked like normal.

Flash forward to Saturday. It was a busy day and i had a hernia, as well as the day before. Saturday night after work something happened to my back and I couldn't move. It was severe Sciatic pain in my lower back. I still have trouble even walking or sitting. I cant even get out of bed on my own. The doctor didn't help, but I am going to a chiropractor later. 

At this point I am so lost and depressed. I hate my job, it gets in the way of my happiness at home and with family(that I never see because of night-shift). I want to grow as a person and work on my career, but this job is holding me back. I would really like to quit but i'm not sure what to do. Any insight is extremely helpful. I am going crazy in my own mind trying to deal with this. Thank you for the help in advance.",2.5064218009478694,4.691185744075831,3.8477227488151686,86.26703436018957,77.81516587677727,6.494881516587678,24.057109004739342,7.554174236665415,1.2229410426540293,1672,57,325,24,40,548,209,422,0.146,0.764,0.091,-0.9516,8,0,1,0,0,0,59.0,2,2,0,12,18,29,1,7,22,0,37,18,1,4,7,56,61,33,0,9,8,0,3,3,0,5,9,0,3,2,16,21,5,2,6,3,2,10,10,18,1,0,11,4,46,11,55,42,11,48,0,5,1,3,16,18,0,2,22,230,62,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09842257002438122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04184741334777069,0.0,0.0941515952110358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419549492509872,0.0,0.07502502471850749,0.0,0.10472726742885212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793728198652877,0.1903264858383772,0.0530019092410402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298594251202197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06296792913333604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193424151211182,0.0,0.0,0.11760288352335242,0.0,0.0,0.05801180539749124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059085372413028435,0.0,0.05624389556571696,0.0,0.07441103921400026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964519579105726,0.0,0.06994602971698965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054417152024373035,0.06550750486784174,0.0,0.06075525529073745,0.0,0.13082235432520498,0.0,0.0,0.12374128516869615,0.0,0.1234536791582901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1926865797101574,0.3053309304198965,0.054697100165457535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04346555165484571,0.09019191807208808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06884439795202679,0.13435026914024614,0.0,0.16661920517556944,0.0,0.04107656585980048,0.0,0.0,0.06703206249699474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06213504032845694,0.0,0.0,0.06540431605372536,0.04523693028715568,0.0,0.14238387118237736,0.0,0.0,0.11549700683763665,0.060293400713030715,0.0,0.07006052203169859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04680182156588157,0.2619197227149787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04266215351034375,0.10746383723321884,0.0,0.0,0.05817255451633342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309047962850342,0.0615538633532676,0.0,0.0394223128031377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04903718952709209,0.0,0.0,0.278078128023589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04737435108681105,0.0,0.0,0.08711270865874654,0.0,0.04914369580426662,0.0,0.3524533336342661,0.12866410717214666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057998092642850566,0.0,0.04626832390329735,0.0,0.0,0.11331039130555495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06045999688474575,0.0,0.035882842317610464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0835594530556199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402168736683287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03629624113303775,0.09769074676317054,0.04936143840393042,0.149871488360675,0.05532934257051415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26879893293620444,0.0,0.0,0.17485707503036754,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justfutaba,2020/04/15,"yeah okay these past few days have sucked and im acknowledging it yep that’s my life okay don’t know why i can’t just move on 👌🏻 

like im so passive aggressive too like “oh must be nice to have x” or “oh wow i wish i had x” shit like that just put my situation in where x is. 

im aware of my awesome ability to absolutely self destruct and destroy myself and we not trying to do that again 🤪 it’s only a cycle when you continue it.

anyways the world sucks.",-1.9044612696563803,-0.11403820792078888,1.331019219569015,96.10173558532324,104.34653465346534,4.75270821199767,16.83226557949913,6.522977012572876,-0.1039125218404191,355,11,86,6,17,125,73,101,0.154,0.561,0.285,0.9069,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,1,1,0,0,8,13,6,0,2,4,9,2,1,0,1,12,13,6,0,2,4,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,3,6,0,0,1,0,9,7,6,10,1,11,0,0,0,0,3,4,3,1,8,47,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13303952644499964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6684834992774602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337119909344195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570822653512092,0.30234758169967424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21925286892955892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689230112917538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969264698423664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20737771437404495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21520471994885346,0.0,0.21175299217735136,0.0,0.23187780563422025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1400568870224119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1861439983732919,0.0,0.23722250331622124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsemma__11,2020/04/15,"What Factors Contribute to Teen Suicide and What Should Society do to Reduce its Prevelance? | SSJP A presentation on teen suicide and many factors involved.

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOz4jPrxLOw](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xOz4jPrxLOw)",19.29888888888889,26.194422592592588,8.804888888888893,41.55400000000003,63.814814814814824,9.567407407407408,42.43703703703704,8.841846274778883,6.47713925925926,218,10,16,5,5,51,21,27,0.293,0.7070000000000001,0.0,-0.8895,0,0,0,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,2,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,11,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4204754391155405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.9073039210212822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,omcr7,2020/04/15,I'm 18 and the only person who talks to me in my family is my mother...all other members think that I'll be a failure like my father...I can't live in this pressure anymore...I was trynna buy a gun to end me and my mum's life but this virus prevented it...Idk what to do with my life... I have friends but they aren't close or listen to me......I just want it to end for me....and Idk why I'm posting it here...I just wanted somebody to hear me out maybe,-1.0302790279027896,0.7121604455445585,1.893879387938796,97.83822682268229,88.1089108910891,4.4648064806480665,17.102610261026097,5.565023196281405,-0.6812851485148514,339,8,85,2,11,119,67,101,0.078,0.831,0.092,0.3182,0,0,0,1,0,1,28.0,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,7,2,0,0,0,14,14,5,0,2,5,1,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,1,8,5,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,2,10,2,11,12,0,7,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,3,46,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4508465754238824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399325386528619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19663638563318675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2868550469589912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3595406169843228,0.12434236859625393,0.0,0.2247399541175922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556928725973677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935688742134173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2222312433139617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24375343874672364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20456819281826827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16308188017937453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.300237140317746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2296587145919675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwaway14149887,2020/04/15,"I have constant feelings of shame Hi, i'm a 26 year old man living in a european nation. I started getting treatment for my mental health a year or so back and i feel better than i ever have before but for one thing. I feel a constant sense of shame over how long it took for me to deal with it and how it caused me to leave college(i'm back now and doing a lot better). I feel so ashamed all the time , i have trouble meeting relatives  or making new friends because of it.  It's as if i'm afraid they will judge and resent me for my struggles and failures. I know when i type it out and think about it that it seems ridiculous and intellectually i know that they're not going to ""exile"" me from the family,  but the feeling just wont go away. Does anyone have any tips/stories to share  because my therapist  isn't really helping?",6.182619047619048,5.433584880952385,6.650714285714281,80.62761904761906,66.26190476190476,8.895238095238097,32.35714285714286,7.793537801064563,2.143507142857143,652,23,132,6,9,213,106,168,0.18,0.742,0.078,-0.9583,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,2,11,12,2,5,8,0,8,1,0,4,2,32,25,18,0,1,7,0,5,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,11,9,0,0,9,0,0,3,3,8,0,1,1,5,18,4,20,22,2,22,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,5,14,91,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1005188710342226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10335527588803496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388765087310899,0.2273203223314597,0.0,0.18021259095147316,0.0,0.1257791801964282,0.0,0.0,0.26145967627409644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184612165313668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31946974136095696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523901714497391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12935339074998795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337066009848711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139346275401834,0.0,0.3736970479814728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11420105042987445,0.0,0.07722693107010242,0.0,0.1680126769616105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571198111281732,0.0,0.0,0.0990768866414197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1624698737063106,0.0,0.0,0.15651412286481142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052283661106506,0.13081110590724512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256665298169488,0.0,0.0,0.09866726987105393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489621640903658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276008318490635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15510636357713145,0.0,0.1001628731328604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469369931177556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13456469197775792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10462380379810056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452772060354095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716239287158162,0.0982013293234416,0.09471350870588956,0.0,0.0,0.08619177413165917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16422725396388427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1903752740654096
mentalhealth,ZVR345,2020/04/15,"Grabbed my girlfriend by her arm during an argument and pulled her towards me, I want to end my life right now.   Just a little backstory, my girlfriend and I have been together for 1 year already. She’s absolutely amazing and super proud to call her my girlfriend, honestly she’s probably one of my best friends and if not my true best friend. She was part of a 6 year abusive relationship. She’s talked to me all about this and i absolutely never understood why anyone would do that to this sweet innocent girl. She’s truly the whole package and the fact she wants me and wants to be with me is even more of a treat. Yesterday was her birthday, for some reason I felt a little uneasy for no reason. It can happen out of nowhere and come at  random times and yesterday was one of those nights, I probably should of told her what I was feeling but instead I was trying to ignore it and brush it off. However, my girlfriends not stupid she can easily see when something is wrong and she needs to ask. She asked about 4 times yesterday and every time I gave her the same answer “no I’m fine honestly”. When our night came to end, she walked me out to my car and that’s where we started to talk. From there everything went downhill, I think of mixture of stress, exhaustion, and annoyance was just making us not see eye to eye. I had said “well if you wanna act like an fucking asshole then go ahead.” 
   She basically stormed off and I went to bring her back because in that moment I knew what I said was fucked up. That’s when I grabbed her the way I did and she immediately lost her shit and even threatened to break up with me if I didn’t leave. In those situations she feels the need to be alone or she’ll lose her shit, she doesn’t like that person she becomes and I don’t like the person I can become in that situation either. I would never abuse any woman in my life, I think I got fired up so quick from what I said which was why I reacted the way i did. I immediately regretted it and wanted to fix it. The way I went about it was insanely stupid  and kept her in my car with me til we can found a solution and just talk and calm but she didn’t even want to be around me. She was so struck by what I did that she wanted to be alone.
   I felt horrible last night and feeling it again this morning. I don’t know what got into me, i don’t know why these random moods that hit me come at some of the worse times and it feels there’s no way I can control it. She should of broke up with me last night like how she wanted to. I’m just not in a good place right now and feel I let myself down and a lot of people like her family too. Her family doesn’t know but they’re just people I think about constantly and want to show them I love their girl. This whole thing really sucks.",3.3560415097497653,4.5012874165202135,4.293219934722572,88.41211042765087,72.90158172231986,7.809205791279608,23.91668758891957,8.269060116576782,1.1442392334086535,2176,59,478,34,42,704,245,569,0.152,0.7120000000000001,0.136,-0.9573,1,2,1,0,2,1,39.0,4,1,2,8,30,39,8,1,18,0,41,11,5,6,5,109,98,42,0,19,17,0,10,5,6,5,3,3,0,5,31,40,0,3,19,1,0,13,16,16,1,2,35,19,97,22,68,52,12,77,0,4,4,3,65,26,5,9,38,337,128,0,0.0,0.15534886177977836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579474713910586,0.07234387826378996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04458106879761349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04583904114275296,0.0,0.0,0.058359708420082874,0.12257405794727833,0.0,0.0,0.050409355102606565,0.0,0.03996299318099447,0.14480530922780935,0.0,0.0,0.13759624141658405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694111793517972,0.07497984559377407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294325528503915,0.0,0.07084392399074838,0.07352785012401468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11612824555532265,0.0,0.0,0.12989951767056734,0.0,0.055234675220588635,0.0,0.058918484750666425,0.0,0.1236027787909666,0.0,0.16573817069488486,0.0,0.12589017297615882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187996470974434,0.10129848920091054,0.12121294543857747,0.0,0.0,0.03725760463399287,0.05498617620092632,0.10486398619393092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057971917595188785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080853855010165,0.10687555519579398,0.0,0.0694154919115507,0.0,0.06703656547588269,0.09260982190451812,0.16013941216809904,0.1314108519622017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0733416141141992,0.07156330717198647,0.0557342930107061,0.059167832646391014,0.0,0.04375986619165842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09721950214519977,0.10112333752627274,0.0,0.0,0.2460835495353937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08884636073125819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07099193926036453,0.0,0.09089806267800313,0.11448384350869052,0.06849320524207263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413632605256365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041997550114560335,0.13480721271270754,0.0,0.07038377989225565,0.0,0.11197079219207264,0.1870794131459632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10448102499340567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458682024769902,0.0,0.14737783029854912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05046905020130545,0.0,0.0,0.04640164525328931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07509542434136847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807691545226735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043553217157551886,0.12601900730390395,0.0,0.0,0.15290746395445035,0.0,0.0,0.06264260824894688,0.0,0.04450896037953076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07885710664102516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093381585331224,0.20814466433783305,0.0,0.0,0.058943696403979035,0.1823162358116054,0.17746522912133222,0.1463842981324932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06680827473333813,0.09313975068059437,0.07167638586582778,0.0,0.08443323231898438
mentalhealth,Richieisme,2020/04/15,"Mental health issues and studying or working I'd love to have  a career in the tech field, Ive tried to get a degree in college years ago, named ""application developer"". But I've quit, because it became too much for me. I couldnt focus anymore on my study, so I quit.

Which was a bad decision and let me to jobs I didnt like with people I didnt like. This path continued up until now. I am now at a point where I said to myself: enough is enough! I want to have a decent, full filling career where I can mean something to society, add value. But I have zero degrees, no job, mental health issues, a bad neigbour that makes so much noise that I cant sleep at night.",3.091094890510952,4.0997114306569395,4.6537299270073005,86.09884306569346,73.37956204379563,6.93985401459854,23.918978102189783,7.1686216300943375,0.8694356204379559,514,14,108,5,10,173,91,137,0.107,0.831,0.062,-0.7015,2,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,7,5,0,0,7,0,13,4,1,1,0,13,19,8,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,2,0,1,4,1,15,3,15,13,5,18,0,0,0,1,3,10,0,1,9,73,20,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13364689105908853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952151782498874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2517702584862617,0.0919068806180292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3115676570519879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07877014915420542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32051904137980586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31472560956938445,0.2992283012382214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541706746621958,0.0,0.14731543025034846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360741650864518,0.0,0.10063892811338213,0.0,0.0,0.16423074270502222,0.0,0.0,0.30387772040507616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22166391371555874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414857197181013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452366965008046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14252465875854795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3207210268743357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14341506079741498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087705882265168,0.0,0.0,0.1160687076353092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10236169471859187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892697638457142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10976102765849174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09708976211804007
mentalhealth,maxbalajr,2020/04/15,"Coping with loss on quarantine is hard Yesterday I fell asleep crying because my dog Chispis died a few days ago and I couldn't even say goodbye to her because I was 600km away. I know I will get over it and remember her without crying but now it's really hard.

Please give your pets love and kisses from me 💜",4.747656249999999,5.042540953125002,5.400000000000002,84.845,69.15625,8.9,28.5,8.841846274778883,1.97395,247,8,52,4,4,80,53,64,0.156,0.648,0.196,0.8302,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,1,2,3,0,0,1,0,4,3,1,0,0,9,8,4,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,3,10,2,7,5,1,8,0,1,0,2,6,3,0,0,4,31,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19875891548829855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21066356972038053,0.0,0.0,0.2733668067067208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4925937876332566,0.1446043795872882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327066159106531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14809624902018154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714652914611665,0.21509378551762745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4017170155820305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1232263248828655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20236874396577767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24612797917259815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436420954797603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25399935810218044,0.0,0.0,0.17831001218896514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21614161651569874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,matchbean_ma,2020/04/15,"Tired of mood swing Is it ever going to stop? It has been almost 2 years now and what should I do?

I will be extremely depressed for a week or two. Can't even get out of bed, don't want to take a shower or brush my teeth, skip school, can't study and can't pull myself together to finish the school assignments. Feeling so guilty because I get nothing done and think about the time I have wasted. Desperately want to escape the pain and planning on suicide. I would think about how would my friends and family react if they find out I kill myself. I know they will be shocked and sad because they really are nice people. But I just don't care anymore and selfishly simply want to escape of all the things.

Sometimes, I wake up in the morning and feel extremely energetic. It may last for few days or just an hour. I feel like shower, brushing my teeth and doing all the things I missed before. The weather is perfect, the air smell fresh, everything is wonderful. I can easily finish school assignments or even study effective. I no longer want to end my life. I would want to keep going and see how things go. I would like to talk about the stupid things we did when we were young with my friends and laugh about it. 

They are literally just keep on repeating. It is so exhausting and basically I cannot get anything done. It feels terrible too. Like you feel so hopeful to the future ahead but then everything collapse and lose all the motivation. 

I don't want to be like this anymore. What's wrong with me and what should I do?",3.5947826086956525,5.500392852842811,4.1499852842809375,86.61131906354517,73.64882943143812,7.593364548494984,24.66903010033445,8.364918446050245,1.4854812307692304,1209,38,242,21,25,382,157,299,0.17600000000000002,0.703,0.122,-0.9218,2,0,0,0,0,3,30.0,2,1,4,6,18,24,2,0,14,0,36,7,3,5,5,68,64,28,2,14,10,0,5,4,2,9,4,0,3,0,14,20,0,3,12,0,0,4,8,12,0,1,5,9,33,11,28,47,4,29,0,4,1,0,10,7,0,9,22,167,47,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901685625982358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19613036499857456,0.0,0.0,0.08137213190115722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055609322126568,0.0,0.08414199303720192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081762072847722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377123570979554,0.0,0.08516762420728223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20238290353855964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08758082467311025,0.0,0.0,0.13062233427448414,0.0894451678849187,0.0,0.0,0.17773899737407772,0.0,0.0932179182302708,0.0,0.24999061339225456,0.07064190324343808,0.0,0.0,0.09037710207211773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15279323613184936,0.0,0.1549865697861233,0.0,0.16859214863288172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09821294748174804,0.09737965496868252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17578317984487524,0.10939918478605468,0.0,0.05434340946093904,0.08060269245163956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984385699139509,0.19323659581052047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1106245774447452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09488072848079383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10521828758666753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855289384988643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334686373146338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30022406555589765,0.07879680165541693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0977976330846276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267046154565125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081617509682644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0743475712351434,0.07947826158851068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627733955738294,0.12672023108457556,0.0,0.0,0.05765936498810235,0.11365125031630625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659414263495444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3499418797421559,0.0,0.07931783017849546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10723419549168617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2809740605464768,0.10811283600640838,0.0,0.06367729126494176
mentalhealth,UnKn0wN31337,2020/04/15,"I'm even having troubles reaching out to my best friend. I always had struggles talking with people in real life because of being abused and bullied for years at school and home, I was starting to be more and more socially anxious and didn't really have friends for most of my life. 

I was lucky enough to finally make some IRL friends 4 years ago, but I ruined my friendship with my best friend and her friend because I made a mistake and accidentally offended/annoyed her, as well and constantly talking only about my deep depression and I caused a drama. It was really terrible for me since I didn't had any friends again anymore and I missed out on a lot fun with them.

They were really awesome friends too, they actually helped me during my most hardest times and showed a lot of empathy to me overall, even saved me from one suicide attempt. They cared about me way more than my family or anybody else ever had. 

I once got in a bus 2 years ago and I saw my best friend there and I was really nervous because I thought she would recognize me as that one guy, but she didn't either realize or tried to ignore it. 

I went to check her profile and I was still blocked by her, which made me really feel sad for a while, almost had tears, remembering that one drama. It took me almost half year after that to message her and apologize for what I had done in the past, she accepted it and we started talking slowly again. It was really amazing for her to comeback, but I usually would struggle picking up topics to talk about, but I've came a long way since then.

Nowadays I talk mostly fine with her, almost like during the good old days, but I occasionally would have issues talking about how I truly feel and if that would be too repetitive or not and I would just end up ""ignoring"" her and I really feel horrible and anxious about it.

Even though I know she's aware about my depression/social anxiety and that she's been a really great friend to me, I still feel she may be judging me from the ""rare"" times I ""ignore"" her. I can't afford losing her again, the only IRL friend.

I don't know how to get past this stutter. I want to talk with her a lot more often again, especially during the pandemic here, she's the only person that makes me feel better.",6.454285714285718,6.321309458049889,6.808874376417233,77.66509387755104,65.53061224489795,9.95849433106576,32.1524716553288,9.592334608150935,2.8322538049886625,1785,64,341,32,25,580,207,441,0.161,0.643,0.196,0.9755,2,0,0,0,1,1,41.0,1,0,4,6,26,40,0,3,15,0,32,2,0,8,1,87,56,36,1,8,12,0,5,1,10,6,2,0,1,2,15,29,0,4,11,3,1,3,6,15,1,4,25,6,70,25,48,21,16,45,0,5,1,0,46,10,0,17,31,252,85,1,0.0,0.07293951362045696,0.06007448700003674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109139917724597,0.0,0.18493282771282565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051223539687785515,0.0,0.0,0.04186347344324516,0.0,0.04709386423720665,0.13909242407551345,0.06105179860211345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125807264518549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19381287014170487,0.0544455488882957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07040918621855959,0.06276536604930077,0.06323992714881993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06652538421781258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03970164068364058,0.0,0.053022250181008604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06299809959277289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051426171734819975,0.0,0.05452462059496597,0.06360879064756025,0.0,0.1219810371298963,0.05568529254184552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058034069022857675,0.0,0.1556350194051151,0.0,0.0,0.06743687702589704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.475617423143766,0.0,0.03216299133379499,0.0,0.0,0.05163430104341294,0.049235817125782524,0.06787102921391147,0.0,0.060954897415050564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041262924763056284,0.0,0.061750528951024265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06425350949435793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06766444124622008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08696446551077304,0.03007551056683048,0.0,0.0,0.05447939478314534,0.0,0.06887081888263015,0.0,0.15701044131023448,0.0,0.11650068617371352,0.08218466024271368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459773240269351,0.06556027174055007,0.12514562896261636,0.14045934915519628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11753355045218995,0.04267852628475703,0.05375253971774745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07006969862761481,0.31549953759679666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0697364165458139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062302843607650385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184750466933827,0.0,0.0,0.06275351069748457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714614055587415,0.0,0.09832511209749276,0.0,0.0,0.12871348556091702,0.0,0.06733755312813923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3463618266195727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06048320007090891,0.048872420311577534,0.07179322668991027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839634403209173,0.041795760646606187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780055380984988,0.0,0.03631017081354432,0.0977282382732658,0.0,0.0,0.055350576727015946,0.05706750347941517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218655226550797,0.0,0.0,0.15857261722277818
mentalhealth,Oxxylis,2020/04/15,"Hearted - an Emotional Support Videochat Service (Free) Hey guys, we've just launched a free emotional support video session platform to combat the adverse effects of social distancing and isolation, and to empower people to make positive change. I thought it might be helpful to some of you.

We connect our users to Hearts: trained volunteers, most with Psychology and Therapy-related backgrounds. You can talk about whatever you want, we're here to listen. We’ve just started our first sessions, so feel free to sign up!

[https://wearehearted.com/](https://www.wearehearted.com/)",10.276468699839489,13.5175967752809,7.532616372391652,63.70303370786519,58.7752808988764,10.478972712680578,45.29855537720706,10.608840637214634,5.881502728731943,479,29,60,12,7,137,69,89,0.07400000000000001,0.684,0.24100000000000002,0.9336,1,1,0,0,0,0,30.0,3,3,0,2,5,6,0,0,3,0,3,2,2,3,0,17,11,4,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,1,5,0,0,3,1,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,7,8,12,8,2,4,0,0,0,0,12,2,0,3,2,36,8,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2134036229843784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4538382626050912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10200076432988822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17159146021634664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19974444536165686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4781021129939543,0.13521538662718488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13465636128987848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140036823886299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13985420242044086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056383608262932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1427855533265492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4578416942087425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621429564821024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16015111012568886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189855981670085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Paigeypiee,2020/04/15,"Lockdown is pushing me to the edge Since quarantine my mental health has fallen so much.
I live by myself & I’m 17. I turn 18 on the 3rd of may but I don’t think I’ll make it til then. Im stuck locked inside by myself, I have no contact with anyone. Just me and my thoughts. All my close family members are vulnerable so even when restrictions are lifted they’ll still be isolating. I’ve been diagnosed with chronic mood disorder plus an attachment disorder but all my therapy appointments have been cancelled until further notice. I haven’t had human interaction in fucking weeks and since college shut I’ve been able to see what friends really care about me (none of them) because none of them have even messaged to see how I’m doing. 
I keep seeing these “make a daily routine” etc etc but I’m poor as fuck and my flat is TINY, I don’t have a garden so what am I actually meant to do? I clean, I watch tv, I play keyboard, I speak to my cat who’s a dick to me. that’s ALL I can do. Plus I’m not eating properly and have lost a drastic amount of weight because I can’t motivate myself to cook. I wont even be able to celebrate my 18th birthday. I actually can’t keep doing this anymore man",1.8028605442176868,3.9322767061224515,3.755331632653064,86.32088860544218,79.89795918367345,7.022108843537416,24.494047619047624,8.07648339933343,1.5303639455782316,943,35,193,18,24,319,146,245,0.14,0.754,0.106,-0.7587,0,2,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,3,2,12,7,2,0,7,0,30,9,1,4,3,28,50,18,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,3,3,1,2,2,7,9,3,3,4,4,1,2,10,3,0,0,8,6,33,3,24,37,9,13,0,1,4,3,11,5,3,1,6,128,40,3,0.2553640444298685,0.0,0.2491984706572851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834341772489586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12662625685437767,0.0892782386875691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15566755128108015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13018033120882808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295945648627051,0.0,0.0,0.2926693186199025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13065058457766826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847984119759087,0.2529983144253989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12036724713526573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09864681363430773,0.23607994419402226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357200189339412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791849433714612,0.0,0.0,0.2269792959583613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274556485887385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393800101331859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17045748259123966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286734472605292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938609776097458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1453668285624478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0817963729159209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30523812197447736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112397764116095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10196702787443836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14601552000135218,0.0,0.0,0.08181348426123705,0.0,0.10136526341837686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388813753541905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241881655996583,0.15548230532073395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,entrylevelheaux,2020/04/15,"It's hard not to hate myself when I can see that I'm so different from other people I don't know if this is the best place to write about it but I would assume self hatred is under the spectrum of mental illness I guess...

But anyway, I have this issue are my ideas and thoughts are not like other people's. And I hate that about myself and it makes me want to die. It makes me feel like a worthless person. I already feel worthless for so many other reasons but that contributes. I notice it a lot online. Especially because people are able to thumbs up/thumbs down, upvote/downvote, etc. the things that you say you write. And so it's very telling that I'm just a dumbass girl with a dumbass brain who should lock herself up, delete all her social media and just die alone. Maybe it's dramatic, but that's how I feel. It feels really bad when I'm on groups on Facebook that I enjoy and I write something in a discussion and everyone gets at least one like except me. It just solidifies that I'm an idiot. Or if I contribute to a discussion on Reddit or make a post and I get zero upvotes or only a few. I wish I was normal and had normal thoughts and views and opinions like everyone else. Being outside the box isn't a good thing. And please don't misunderstand, because that seems to happen to me a lot as well and I think it's because I'm an idiot and don't know how to express myself properly, I'm not saying anything bigoted. I'm talking about normal things. This is also why I find it hard to make friends. Not only am I socially awkward and boring, but I can never click with other people and or hold conversations because I think so strangely and not down the same logical pathways that other people do.",4.0435465116279055,5.260695005813954,5.246748837209303,81.95406511627908,71.32558139534882,7.7133023255813935,26.84139534883721,8.109356740369918,1.7195673488372094,1358,45,260,19,25,451,167,344,0.213,0.706,0.081,-0.9946,1,1,1,0,0,1,31.0,0,2,0,1,17,18,4,1,17,0,20,2,1,7,2,79,51,38,2,9,20,0,6,4,1,2,1,2,0,3,33,19,0,1,16,0,0,0,10,9,1,2,4,11,32,9,28,44,8,14,0,2,3,0,23,10,0,12,7,188,65,0,0.09260604961343928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591193887623556,0.1021930785437322,0.07405702441822319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07620688828506136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07732218326994528,0.22580715322430386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09718433573007244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337897802801113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19222091777814296,0.09675361165311687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07736047150328543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328022462266774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17697809790142438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872976047400481,0.06615778034740466,0.0,0.0,0.08464025164663917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07154720421210478,0.0,0.09676567749855564,0.0,0.0,0.07767356075148826,0.0,0.0,0.1020160041475532,0.0,0.08189122383698888,0.0,0.16591366154351667,0.1828586034072042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10454095796647267,0.0,0.0966566559894011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178772602024533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1809705525155163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574607035153464,0.0,0.0,0.2472610288589238,0.09388799921379463,0.09303522393576798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933251168350237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07142349444375327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722027994853126,0.0,0.10543260127366473,0.0,0.0,0.06275225588146796,0.14086214743887376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32100687306446674,0.08086003054060653,0.09675361165311687,0.10165363340078254,0.0,0.0,0.08869099685318486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059325806695793126,0.0952144425183988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14728809517454575,0.0,0.0,0.07379503179624937,0.0843050695280913,0.09660830637577973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888004108521599,0.0,0.07129266131466275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07443323482446917,0.08094176913900858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1845700333724721,0.11867643464779462,0.0,0.1470377183938993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640968942118011,0.05462144740201815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08326396014194233,0.0,0.08356255582653375,0.0,0.10649238680754604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06578468064802205,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tripleaaron117,2020/04/15,Wtf do I do.. It's been a year since this shits got worse. Depression isn't anything new for me and I've never really had a problem with it. I would fall and a hole and get my self back out pretty quick.. but nowadays idk what to do. It's like depression just took over completely. Im an introvert now. A recluse staying in the house avoiding all  contact possible. I don't have the energy to talk to new people or old friends I haven't really seen in a while. I hate it. I'm not myself anymore.,-0.2343681318681305,2.0395860576923117,2.1706043956043963,92.73153846153849,92.26923076923076,6.048351648351648,20.89010989010989,7.447530270364453,0.9288840659340668,386,14,85,8,14,131,74,104,0.237,0.6609999999999999,0.102,-0.9313,0,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,4,8,2,1,8,0,10,1,1,0,2,14,16,6,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,6,0,0,5,1,8,2,9,10,1,16,0,2,1,0,4,4,1,1,10,54,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18072980354799176,0.0,0.0,0.14996524799088914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012874683560006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1910716763938457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139203456179399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14079559557119956,0.0,0.0952111360904494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14575130889525487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17992097843341925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2102766442200613,0.0,0.0,0.19684687051795693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903162954744892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055215083139685,0.3520106139155936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912267247500943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633995799912326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2054444585899203,0.0,0.18540020389761264,0.0,0.1743758771151717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334909484852484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19011258627212085,0.0,0.1870633181431341,0.1507480527371841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19424003787478694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647492858468733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2024716405307162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.185714730878338,0.12945569842032206,0.0,0.0,0.11735443760444557
mentalhealth,yamyamcereal,2020/04/15,"What is this? What is this

Im afraid that nothing is real and im only dreaming. Im afraid that one day life will become an inescapable nightmare. I feel like nothing is real and I feel like I cant trust anything. Im so scared everyone will turn on me and torture me in an inescapable nightmare for entirety. I dont know whats wrong and I dont know what to do. Also, with my “ocd?” I feel like if I disobey it, it will slowly tear me apart, destroying everything I hold dear to me. I feel like it might make that nightmare true and I have to frequently apologize for everything. I feel like if I say anything good about myself, I will be punished. If I say I think I look good, ill be burned in a fire (stuff like that). I feel like if I dont do things a certain amount of times, ill be punished. 
I dont want that to happen 
Even typing it scares me 
I feel like talking about it might make it true but idk what to do 
I mean 
I guess I dont feel it every second 
But weekly? Monthly? 
I dont want it to get worse 
What even is this? Does anyone else feel the same?",-0.03614703880190717,2.0772882035398297,1.8973451327433644,96.94151123213072,87.31858407079645,4.715861130020421,19.311776718856365,6.093298490706669,-0.17961075561606554,818,24,189,7,26,270,100,226,0.14300000000000002,0.7340000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.7396,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,0,6,24,4,4,5,0,25,3,0,2,3,39,47,13,0,6,6,0,10,8,0,6,3,2,0,0,24,6,0,1,13,1,0,0,7,9,0,2,0,13,31,15,15,38,2,9,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,7,13,118,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058900503944139565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05150008811947237,0.07546649255419652,0.12122075277170725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08134426462123583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047500274463212484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445448444638249,0.0,0.5179265960341805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06152786710909933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729459779168792,0.0,0.06205606771424525,0.07037886841497314,0.13238964345155488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33517181705737115,0.3683254415134552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03848080053131683,0.0,0.0,0.12355375894018845,0.0,0.0,0.081137395160853,0.0,0.06513135506716469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182327391795625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08095583646546274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05202349209223542,0.2878661903026815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06185020781287692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832827689167416,0.0,0.0,0.0802300175764562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15626898823181534,0.0,0.0,0.058789347936267035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413446232911863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04990937084072947,0.056016640797964264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16766712201582915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11714409401275372,0.14747957075284604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431538784074752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059199719078571376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048931968592345866,0.047194049868744085,0.0,0.0,0.042947821722838425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011362202075134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0868852294137143,0.0,0.05908022106471885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0750589879304399,0.0,0.08052830286479554,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blehblahblewreddit,2020/04/15,"Asking for a friend Hi my friend and i go way back in our freshman year to  seniors in highschool, and he was funny quirky and overall normal and the best, always with the jokes and laughs, overall our years he was pretty normal but as we reached our 4th year we noticed that he was somewhat ""reserved"" of thats the right term he wasnt 
as spontaneous as he used to be but tbh, thats just normal as we were growing up, and you change a lot through the years , what ive noticed what he kept saying sorry when he thought he did things wrong in the verry annoying way and he keeps asking us all about what do we think of him and such, he wasnt bullied also he was part of the group until he wasnt 

Then he became weird, he kinda lost the skills to socialized like he became awkward, and all of us were already close friends he just became that and we didnt know why and what was happening  an as we graduated it seems it worsen. All of us soon went on our separate paths but we would occasionally hangout and talk about stuff

But as of now about a year later, he did improve although not to his old self just to the way he was when he started becoming awkward and reserved

Guys with way more experience i want to know what is happening to him, just your insights, i have never experienced or heard of something like this ever

Also he also did seek for professional help",5.249631544925663,5.639251571428575,5.6714759750053885,83.00342598577895,68.08424908424908,8.181771170006465,29.61193708252532,7.928766900206844,1.819192803275156,1081,37,217,12,17,347,141,273,0.073,0.7859999999999999,0.141,0.9552,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,14,2,0,3,17,14,1,2,12,0,21,0,0,1,5,55,39,32,0,5,10,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,0,2,14,23,0,2,6,2,0,3,6,6,0,0,20,3,24,8,34,17,9,33,0,1,0,0,53,7,0,5,21,148,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155391528732947,0.24252183649150436,0.08411391236244578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18900861282023504,0.0,0.0,0.07773098517472933,0.0,0.0,0.11164454813891207,0.0,0.0,0.10608637404585572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693846095097463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144053388912617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888416471098664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2343026809092616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05745104867054879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10009372508190856,0.17878484094747896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06775763757235102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985229830651284,0.0,0.0,0.11111143266804707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09877368395442716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103502783861769,0.08594201403531153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0779658521129088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29713644473254675,0.0,0.2301803534761316,0.1060756057713158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946923179121054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10284356940310474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08632921379542358,0.0,0.08038980685419976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09202737326681627,0.1054575806803218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10304721874780334,0.0,0.07782303473224741,0.0,0.11316054480779301,0.07155111569915677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572239813672025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08125128326198176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715885315919026,0.06477356943326151,0.0,0.08025315126765632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3647918471537018,0.08730819646979698,0.0,0.0,0.05962474565974184,0.3209580798030585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0937102553956403,0.09121684566804368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07181052569106272,0.11052464519282744,0.0,0.3254891039710052
mentalhealth,chrys_907,2020/04/15,"I just don’t know what to do. I just recently got out of a trauma treatment center. When I was there I finally told my dad that my stepmoms oldest some had raped me twice. My last session with my therapist and him I was told to find a new place to live because they confronted the son, and he said I was lying. I have since cut him out of my life, but I’ve been out of state for treatment for 6 months now. I am so angry at him, yet I still want to see him. I want my protector back. However he’s chosen her family over his own daughter. I feel like I’m going crazy because the two sides of black and white of combating each other. 

Can someone please give me some advice on how to find that grey area? I was doing so well at it while in treatment, now I feel like I’ll never be able to find it again. I just feel really lost and alone. Like he’s betrayed me.",2.2212880562060877,3.302359907103828,3.8226112412178,90.93799180327869,75.6120218579235,7.195784543325528,22.361046057767368,7.7094869923839395,0.7331111631537865,665,17,153,9,14,222,114,183,0.158,0.735,0.106,-0.9019,1,1,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,1,1,15,9,3,0,4,0,13,2,0,1,1,26,28,10,0,2,4,3,3,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,9,0,0,7,0,0,1,2,5,1,2,11,8,30,4,22,16,4,29,0,1,4,1,17,12,0,2,18,103,36,1,0.15057892168498715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14714397953562092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15595435063892452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578589609362007,0.0,0.18358302607229396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419524061837636,0.0,0.2284116815828774,0.215147223477692,0.0,0.1649518484663592,0.4128792193587087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14444902258025388,0.08557747128619017,0.0,0.1204317193177648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08275423737906178,0.12274191867422135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635834553387033,0.2206957653004788,0.0,0.13296394658157515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437468068110614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019065868224647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11613574729952912,0.14543006088001245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15732292407104298,0.16529043800859253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646471302505602,0.0,0.14867851918745714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1432350367485252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11999190506422346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456044005746295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758503169661933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025252136835342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17483373394564505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877692251758589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14709372651315875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1776306987502795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13538853439630902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alexzandrazoo,2020/04/15,"I made a coloring book based on mental health and recovery! ""Recovering Colour"", I hope it can help people keep their hands busy during quarantine. with 73 pages to print off and color yourself  via digital download, it's up for £4 and half of all sales go to SurvivorsUk (helping male survivors of sexual abuse).

[gumroad.com/azbt](https://gumroad.com/azbt) 

I appreciate any level of support on this :))",6.477467532467532,10.014962893939394,6.144718614718619,67.80136363636367,71.57575757575758,9.225974025974024,29.12554112554113,9.606745405546679,3.5661541125541127,325,13,47,9,7,101,57,66,0.0,0.835,0.165,0.8832,0,1,0,0,1,0,23.0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,2,1,1,1,8,6,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,4,4,2,11,5,2,6,0,0,3,0,4,5,0,1,0,25,7,1,0.0,0.3643997249784727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20914642081029225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1747893190389752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269141982768459,0.0,0.0,0.4122922594111732,0.0,0.0,0.30546928223555353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2733670211164176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29101385445486466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3099408413077825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213218356809692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3490072233392021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,L3gtphantom,2020/04/15,"You say you care, just to prove you don’t You say you care, just to prove you don’t

My name is Ryan (21M). I feel like I’m writing this because at this point, I’ve got nothing to lose. None of it matters to anybody I know anyway, so I might as well just tell all of you.

I haven’t always felt how I feel now. Up until about maybe grade 7, I had a ton of friends. People that would show genuine excitement on their faces whenever they see me, phone always going off from texts, people talking to me everyday. But ever since I’ve left middle school, things have been going downhill.

It seems like everybody I used to know just stopped caring. Whether that be because they got busy, got bored, or just didn’t care enough anymore. People always say when people want to leave your life, let them go. But after they all live one by one by one, that philosophy begins to fade. You start to look at yourself as the issue. Yourself as the problem. 

Why can’t I seem to keep people around? I’m now 21, I’m in college and I hate how I took those days for granted in the past. Where I had friends, family that showed they cared. I don’t feel like I belong anymore. Like nothing I ever do makes a difference in anybody else’s life anymore. I’ve tried to be the best friend I can be because despite how shit people treat me, I still treat others how I’d want to be treated.

Maybe a week or has passed since I’ve first tried to reach out to people who feel like me on here. At first it seems some of you all care, then by day two you guys are all gone. I hate being selfish, you all have your own lives and own stuff going on. I just wish there were people that genuinely wanted to stick around is all. I met someone on here who called me their favorite person ever after just talking for a few days. Honestly, I felt the happiest I can remember since they said that. 

But now, days later it’s like they’ve just forgotten I exist? Paragraphs fade to one word responses. “How are you feeling” every morning when I wake up, turns into no responses from them at all. A different person I thought genuinely cared about me seems to forget about me every day until about an hour before she goes to sleep that night.

I have one real friend that lives five hours ahead and I can’t help but feel like I’m smothering the hell out of her. She knows how great of a friend she is and how positively she’s impacted my life since she became a friend of mine, but I feel like I rely on her far too much. Like she does what she can, she says she likes being here for me but I can feel it crushing her.

I’m not looking for answers from anybody. Or solutions. Not looking for anything honestly. Stopped looking a while ago. I just wish I didn’t disappoint everybody in my life and was enough to keep people around is all. Every day I read about people who have succumbed to illnesses, tragedies and suicide. It’s like I feel like my life could’ve been utilized better by so many other people who have lost theirs. I don’t know...just felt like getting this out.

I hope nobody ever has to feel how I do. It sucks feeling this way. I hope you all stay safe out there. Better me be dead than any of you.",2.202936619159683,4.197232516380659,3.0795679420397164,92.33430418572675,77.97035881435258,5.843422618260664,21.94084983738332,6.772648465950304,0.4295007324360776,2477,71,524,24,59,784,266,641,0.092,0.7120000000000001,0.19699999999999998,0.9955,2,0,0,0,0,3,72.0,0,16,10,8,46,52,6,0,15,0,44,10,4,10,15,106,113,35,2,9,21,0,14,13,6,2,6,5,0,3,29,14,0,5,26,3,0,7,13,12,1,9,20,24,89,40,79,83,19,77,1,3,5,0,65,29,3,11,52,343,118,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04028415077169795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344136071550764,0.0,0.0,0.030904081864349574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520735095166345,0.0,0.0,0.03739727024837035,0.12136675422351202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08310834482792906,0.0,0.03867025207931152,0.0,0.0476916056933179,0.08038461988943392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04640431116964649,0.0,0.3243386407685926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0362840447760923,0.0,0.0,0.1758491572133309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949604699502414,0.0,0.0,0.03976912728961931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03796337213675262,0.0,0.0,0.09391343392131553,0.0,0.0,0.16443001001209312,0.11486783319509895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04284139543354337,0.0,0.2527613063877061,0.1947950202162404,0.1309026560994184,0.0,0.0,0.07731079616581253,0.0,0.0,0.21066364406010749,0.0,0.023743078044622855,0.0,0.10330950735215423,0.0,0.10903928398412738,0.05010314889155048,0.0,0.044997583449485706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08973483582322447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0304607501469935,0.0,0.0,0.09027405459464684,0.0895081200030619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04743265558643701,0.0,0.08078700813396286,0.0,0.0,0.09990128671064996,0.0,0.0,0.04811957412747128,0.04937600322712074,0.04647047644318504,0.16049533999357996,0.28862699472569325,0.0,0.12038600472608285,0.0,0.15264903961466791,0.05084120474855197,0.0496084630309504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03033481528447316,0.04607398305705842,0.09131099538217463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048209844030176585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03340722126044162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04264694838764522,0.0,0.08721119040284195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15397315942856668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04338228730478432,0.346563392341592,0.07936144572934409,0.0,0.0,0.042960107763192916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0434846198611886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04545718552130552,0.05172623111490796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0514801985740616,0.0,0.04322849477688924,0.14455839422300445,0.0,0.04599265232596865,0.036213691559591005,0.16548527511876973,0.0,0.0,0.046648523947232574,0.1503699221827862,0.0,0.04547770724359634,0.0,0.03850530569548896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03216612526851141,0.04843820342895983,0.036292345852546114,0.07598792165690478,0.0,0.0,0.05202352358122856,0.049709330909635314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07305375828438718,0.039720834730186484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030191563926005083,0.0,0.0,0.03607816442334876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05049094213492784,0.06170819104901065,0.04943098776045714,0.04439305167667176,0.0,0.0,0.03924979166535055,0.0,0.0,0.08041371623295276,0.03607203640364664,0.036453147550597184,0.0,0.04086041156450358,0.0,0.04100694245905858,0.0,0.10451875567832293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03228274419491131,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JoeyTawadrous,2020/04/15,"How I keep focused on work while maintaining my mental health Okay, so this is more of a personal achievement relating to a discovery I made some time ago. It may or may not be common knowledge already, as it kind of goes against what many people claim to be the best approach across the web.

It's simple really, instead of trying to get my most difficult task done first in the morning, or my most important task, delaying the answering of emails until later on in the day or sticking to a routine of focused work at the same time every day... I decided to...

Just do whatever task I want to do first thing in the morning, and before lunch and whenever I want. When I'm ready to work I take a look at my list of tasks and just choose whatever I want to work on next. All tasks are organized in separate Trello boards \[1\] and sometimes I complete tasks from emails in my Inbox.

Sure, sometimes I will need to focus on particular tasks because of any number of reasons. However, for the majority of the time, I just focus on exactly what I want to.

The result is that I fall into focused work almost every day because I'm almost always doing jobs that I really love. I'll get around to the jobs I may not want to do on a particular day of course, because sure enough my mood changes day by day and so those unattractive tasks will soon become attractive. Or at least attractive enough!

This way I can avoid the dreaded burnout. I can prevent myself from getting fed up with work and can continue to build momentum on a regular basis. Of course, there will be times when I feel like switching off completely. Then I can fuel my mind with other useful things such as reading, exercise, cooking, quizzes, guitar and more.

What are your thoughts?

\[1\] [https://trello.com/b/WZbLY594/darwinmail](https://trello.com/b/WZbLY594/darwinmail)",7.1815126889078975,8.12928233233533,6.829024807527803,74.4299900199601,64.0,9.834958654120332,33.27003136583975,9.842372674337009,3.2592462503564303,1465,58,251,29,21,459,176,334,0.035,0.8240000000000001,0.141,0.9801,3,1,0,0,0,0,62.0,0,1,0,11,13,13,0,2,18,1,22,6,0,5,4,55,42,21,0,6,9,0,1,1,0,6,2,0,0,1,14,11,3,4,7,4,0,2,2,3,0,2,4,2,27,9,54,29,12,47,0,0,1,1,5,20,0,12,25,175,41,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08306661901319028,0.0,0.18767034784855371,0.0,0.10340927131617282,0.0,0.07797268578650142,0.0,0.0,0.06372475390450355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834201188376948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17137085142399405,0.10349328698801477,0.07973873186059488,0.0,0.09834091980008633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913079513282966,0.0,0.1965024202268744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3626040183598159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095895969990245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936511329225552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15790631226928384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04738165515080485,0.06694511952385188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15941620532370174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14687591871878994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09960737913835196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859817546068474,0.08329210740858002,0.0,0.09758261575254401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0457810676417442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07869124316572103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08457526201471326,0.08866891523215904,0.0,0.09500535381050408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443577260740424,0.0,0.09461851610449074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06948340423427507,0.0,0.0,0.09965967829856316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496543073976245,0.08182234018157432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09373350657209444,0.0,0.12006367805097032,0.0963475830253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18535950860322728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17663764065327298,0.0,0.0704568650350895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12451105906473778,0.0,0.0,0.07439380206458375,0.2185678982909605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06362168120300271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08093375255916664,0.0,0.0,0.27635746738269623,0.07438116598145553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4093238860142186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jinisin176,2020/04/15,"Cognitive behavioural therapy never works for me, because it just seems like lying to yourself really hard. Thinking the opposite of your belief really hard does not make you believe it. I don't know what I'm missing here. I have had severe depression for 10 years since I was 12 years old. Over the past two years I've been to three psychologists who have all tried to give me cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) with no success. I really want it to work because I don't want to go back on medication which made me stupid and numb, but I just don't get it at all. 

They say you have to actively challenge your negative thoughts, because having negative thoughts causes depression. They say it's going to be really hard work. Okay, I get it. I'm all in, ready to put in the hard work so I can stop wanting to kill myself all the time.

So every few days when I have a severe depressive episode, crying uncontrollably, I go to my journal and write down the thoughts I'm having like they told me to. So I write down, for example, ""I'm the worst piece of shit on earth, everyone would be so much better off if I was dead"".

Okay, so now I'm meant to challenge it. I write down, ""I'm a good person and I deserve to live"". I think it really hard. I think of times people have told me I'm not worthless. I think of things I've done and try to convince myself they were good things to do and I'm proud of them. But **nothing happens** because I don't believe it. I strongly believe that I **am** worthless. It's the objective truth, and I think I'm correct and reasonable in thinking that way.

An atheist will never become a Christian by thinking really hard, ""I believe in God"", and vice versa. Lying to yourself with all your might (which I guess is the ""hard work"" psychologists always talk about) seems like a fucking stupid treatment and it just never works. I've dropped thousands of dollars I don't have on this and I'm frustrated. I want it to work and everyone says it's the most effective treatment but clearly I'm not understanding something obvious. What am I missing?",3.1726705170517064,5.271312829207922,4.266864686468647,84.45929592959297,75.4108910891089,7.459185918591862,28.05390539053905,8.344100000000001,2.0878654565456545,1629,68,313,30,36,530,179,404,0.20600000000000002,0.652,0.142,-0.9852,0,0,1,0,0,1,60.0,0,5,5,14,13,31,6,1,14,2,29,4,1,5,12,68,74,21,2,6,10,0,7,3,0,3,2,3,0,1,23,13,0,1,18,0,1,4,14,16,0,3,13,10,44,15,43,56,10,34,2,7,0,1,22,13,2,6,18,202,67,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05538671988823381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05118373621664225,0.0,0.16230759526600078,0.07351489356687152,0.0,0.29998009087929994,0.0,0.05887059706957831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06837973619342096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07311761262908233,0.0429283814638928,0.0,0.1719948603621972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058250751740724215,0.06811825416407133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05608318219401959,0.1272098296044563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06153750045742596,0.06955406059911078,0.06385441507073936,0.11348985146320392,0.11166173153778347,0.0,0.0,0.07332793525539015,0.0,0.058862473684207814,0.0,0.4173989382016808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364338928143549,0.0,0.036581925776128135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09755967018760343,0.0,0.05877737960979557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298462495192571,0.04443209883305155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06705639607336875,0.0,0.07061406290386149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048932322246291286,0.0,0.15401516909180588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387011417390355,0.0,0.06984789672503297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06354302998233967,0.04614721268745367,0.058121263754405524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691537370617127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25585626189029176,0.06843905066374502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588034935855877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12119503663593187,0.0,0.15039712557550794,0.06832716161289153,0.05506256739400369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05124434834268535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05565062476094799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053501756608341305,0.0,0.0,0.15224385382758016,0.0,0.08844455057362975,0.2985614165266206,0.0,0.1585335416425454,0.07762820298603301,0.0,0.0,0.1272098296044563,0.0,0.0903854009917729,0.0,0.06502351971163163,0.06929564610909777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1570450829600328,0.052835538030014964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33921654813448304,0.0,0.0,0.047285274929780484,0.0,0.0,0.12859542486122508
mentalhealth,WATN-WeAreTheNews,2020/04/15,"Free Mental Health & Coaching Workshops **Free Mental Health Workshops**

During this challenging time, I have decided to use my skills as I believe it’s important that we take care of ourselves, each other and our collective mental health. 

Therefore, I will be offering **FREE Mental Health and Coaching Workshops**, as I believe that we all need support now and do not want a lack of finances to be a barrier to anyone.

I am psychotherapist and coach. If you would like to know more about my professional background, please feel free to check out:

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[https://www.patreon.com/user?u=32549306&fan\_landing=true](https://www.patreon.com/user?u=32549306&fan_landing=true)",14.947407407407406,21.016541260869566,8.359082125603866,47.27013687600646,63.02173913043478,7.5085346215781,32.35829307568438,8.285830014693849,3.7584044283413856,1288,47,120,22,27,332,118,184,0.013999999999999999,0.767,0.21899999999999997,0.9893,0,0,0,0,0,0,124.0,7,4,0,4,7,11,0,0,10,0,15,4,0,3,1,34,25,11,0,8,3,0,1,1,0,6,4,0,0,0,6,12,0,1,5,4,9,3,1,0,1,0,0,1,18,15,22,15,6,10,0,0,0,0,18,3,0,1,4,89,24,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536879352887024,0.0,0.3469942249981714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07464283146981969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24054380388373775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10883983225868503,0.0,0.0,0.09195659594667184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053976549399312006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11769343349426273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4538855895586777,0.0,0.0,0.07155299319351006,0.0,0.10708002893881677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05866759726479988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05215318146343553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4303198889090867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07915456708185523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4687224802467471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113985119071102,0.0,0.0,0.08026352063858973,0.0,0.0,0.09828204442988206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06224740842028939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12840839543028315,0.09219865112726748,0.0,0.0,0.06296454795668943,0.0,0.08562927065101653,0.0,0.09598203381237196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274986956492574,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Vujanickkkk,2020/04/15,"Daydreaming, lack of motivation and pacing. Ever since I was a little child, I've kept to myself as sort of a recluse. When my family would all sit together I would be in my room daydreaming. Daydreaming has become a serious part of my life. I never accept the real world as I'm always imagining this fake fairytale world. As a child it was cute, but at 28 it's depressing. I also have a severe lack of motivation. Everytime I make these plans for my life I sit around and do nothing. I miss alarms and important events, job interviews etc. I also can't sit still at times. I'm always walking around my house daydreaming and listening to music. My attention span is extremely short. I start shows and never complete them,constantly pausing them and feeling the need to walk about. I'm just curious, are these signs of a mental illness or normal behaviour patterns?",4.416825396825395,6.686080382716052,5.603104056437391,75.50111111111113,72.33333333333333,9.566843033509699,28.855379188712522,9.957137785484203,3.328693474426806,690,28,117,20,14,229,104,162,0.124,0.767,0.109,-0.5295,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,3,9,7,0,1,8,0,11,3,0,3,4,32,21,14,0,6,3,0,1,0,0,2,3,1,1,2,5,8,0,1,6,1,0,2,3,5,0,0,3,2,17,2,18,15,5,24,0,2,0,0,5,11,0,2,8,80,22,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731799524949686,0.2842412244079782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3040992686029846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18863694584041288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17908222591354953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14711116611792652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19048893118332896,0.0,0.15449982400752466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16101654568366014,0.0,0.08636241998523601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970821118821408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16949423094050384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412844398047511,0.0,0.17118807243067388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11401139299102846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1721278378645317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664722073100604,0.26346544399329114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16734930147084814,0.16388873986852934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849614861882624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19440961180354047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929571890485986,0.0,0.14128884691764612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208942502070883,0.0,0.13640237683197146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09959578536997164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426651094275024,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,greasydoor,2020/04/15,"Can't Sleep With Corona being a thing, I have felt more anxious than normal. Ever since Illinois issued a stay at home order and suspended schools, I have found trouble sleeping.  I'm always tired, so it took about a week or two to notice the extra tiredness. Now, I have trouble falling asleep, and staying awake.",6.040517241379309,7.401502534482759,5.73051724137931,79.80370689655173,66.75862068965517,6.4896551724137925,31.74137931034483,5.985473137389443,1.8640551724137933,249,10,40,1,4,77,49,58,0.258,0.742,0.0,-0.9229999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,4,0,5,4,3,0,1,8,9,4,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,1,3,1,3,0,5,5,2,9,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,28,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16943957186174766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300481470844885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1841983624090774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19552030992183772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232738687217712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20426122933852905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212540703077082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995178148535104,0.0,0.23183834545659826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20608820106914566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16844792151756574,0.0,0.4075615734511625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4340929127959533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13528519844595535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2340470110240297,0.0,0.0,0.22624456100346144,0.0,0.0,0.1989205600749667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16334269110565985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,notaseoul,2020/04/15,"Venting post Yall can ignore this cause I don’t wanna talk so don’t mind me I just need to type this somewhere where at least 1 person can read it cause real life is empty as hell. This is like the ugliest vent ever especially if you can’t tell I’m putting a lot of attitude in my words.

Cry session numba two! Is there a third? Third time’s always the charm, maybe one of the gods will give mercy and take me off this godless planet cause I am _tired_. Will yall believe me if I say I’ve been having recurrent depressive disorder for 7ish years cause some people don’t and that be hurting my feelings 🥺 jk I got no expectations cause expectations all lead to disappointment. I miss not worrying about the possibility of getting judged and fought over wanting to make online friends, being able to speak my voice and not pushed down, not having to hold in my emotions, having my problems compared to the lArGe amount that others are going through and have it worse. I miss that carefree life man I really don’t know why I’m even living like this. I don’t even know why I’m living anymore. Cry session numba 3 is that you? No. Anyway I miss a lot of things in life but have been holding back so much [cry session numba 3 ACTIVATE]. I just feel too much sadness and wish I could just die already but I know I can’t die yet. It’s so hard :’) I need to see my brother grow up first, my parents to get along enough for mom to move back in. I really miss being in the psych ward lol I can’t handle being in the real world too much shit going on. I really miss having friends irl, being alone is shit. 

Ugh being alive sucks but I have to. If ur reading this dw I’m not dying so no pity <3 I just wanna list some of my stuff so at least someone in the world will know, even if it’s just for a second. My favorite color is orange because my best friend in 11th grade said that’s what color my aura would be. Bright and bubbly. That’s who I used to be. I like to find positivity in everything even in  the dark, unless it’s pretty bad then yeah. But I just find most things in life beautiful and want to appreciate everything. One day I want to be able to send penpals and self care packages to people across the world. I just want to be happy. I have two hamsters, Sugar and Daisy. I really love them a lot. It’s really hard to get out of bed most days but I still try. I only wish my friends the best and hope that they will succeed in life. I remember everyone I met in the psych ward and hope they all succeed at their recovery goals, those were the most genuine and kind people I’ve met in a long time. I hope my eyeballs depuff cause they hurt now lol. I really love a lot of things but it’s so hard. I don’t like fighting people. I don’t fight people unless there’s a reason I have to. I love being around people who are kind and empathetic towards others, aggressiveness and threatening manners will cause me to have an anxiety attack and I look dumb cause I’m always being blamed for shit. I used to never apologize for things that weren’t my fault but I had to because I felt fear. I don’t fear anymore, only fatigue and drained. Tears rollin still but that fear is long gone. Eventually I’ll be pushed over the edge and I’ll be free but not right now.",1.6446537582358474,3.8239269309309343,3.116446147640179,90.42397539330376,80.74174174174175,5.837981264846937,20.4508090179732,7.014971019744422,0.4093752678051188,2560,70,538,31,67,837,287,666,0.191,0.606,0.20199999999999999,0.9745,3,1,0,0,3,1,57.0,0,4,5,7,35,56,11,3,23,3,59,14,3,13,4,109,110,41,3,22,27,3,6,4,4,6,7,4,1,3,33,21,1,3,11,2,1,10,21,31,0,8,12,16,69,26,69,77,20,61,1,12,5,3,38,32,6,16,22,352,102,13,0.10530491062316233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0545320645531048,0.05810329372257227,0.0,0.08762212143897742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04027898419725191,0.0,0.10443417506459413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04687184819607578,0.0,0.059899769072169685,0.0,0.08097297618499985,0.04396260089064265,0.06419289611103662,0.0,0.0,0.05932128677538229,0.11051100690231247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053682687292353565,0.4327086031305496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04203870119701554,0.0,0.17350874937282354,0.06791295569404243,0.0,0.04534948260746631,0.0,0.16393480758835888,0.0,0.06034427538187492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05922692539879014,0.0,0.05440406122535155,0.0,0.13910580062466668,0.04762716023928014,0.0,0.05031167742161781,0.09464126356826376,0.0,0.0,0.17774595143834596,0.05324532686960885,0.0,0.05055461410672225,0.0,0.09624678055026137,0.044786151590511684,0.0,0.0,0.16271662545466015,0.0,0.08252620425104787,0.0505090328785817,0.05984720745976078,0.0,0.04211097840600158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05604951774760635,0.14149877388895313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688730530318254,0.0,0.0,0.11273108479006062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096588596577844,0.11574564983432065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18594993152332231,0.10289332034796746,0.0,0.09298616535565007,0.09319153214921304,0.04421480160200268,0.0,0.0,0.17905293854514526,0.14256268982341766,0.0,0.03514592277349644,0.0,0.052896468331482316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05316397033689715,0.06166591930124489,0.0,0.055961227355843766,0.11611683876950114,0.07808225691339732,0.040608819457200254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135733275076238,0.08008912974992421,0.0,0.0,0.058464320625522724,0.0,0.0,0.2190154977039565,0.04597409307819686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0593577321870245,0.05042649770554738,0.05356647595124847,0.0,0.0503812888637712,0.0,0.05293026029387842,0.0,0.0,0.1053334076275092,0.11986004246804215,0.20238306669462572,0.05413549331435431,0.0,0.0,0.05964496788527762,0.04496490914796216,0.05008454229225843,0.041871345778582064,0.0,0.0,0.04195718994696064,0.0,0.054927993963799215,0.0,0.16214096622367247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044612254521827086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08409663765155588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06027446434219436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039588093715395775,0.04232004913988945,0.0460205666932313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13991980688902808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0614041402240247,0.06051625189158955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03574756095862541,0.0,0.10286759627685926,0.0,0.0,0.09094963221696717,0.0,0.0,0.12422312928339292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09502130270633133,0.0,0.12109545026082652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053471124179912434,0.053657350187602315,0.03740279358060376,0.0,0.0,0.033906454942101434
mentalhealth,volk_soltir,2020/04/15,"I haven't been the same since I took 10 hits of LSD I don't mean that in a good way either. I went through an acid stage when I was around 21 (I'll be 28 this year) for a few months. The last time I took it, it completely skewed my view of everything. 

The first few times I took it, I felt fine afterwards aside from maybe a little haziness for a few days after. Now, I didn't take 10 hits on purpose, as I would usually only take about 2 hits, maybe 3 if I was feeling it. A buddy of mine had one of those droppers with the liquid inside and he was convinced that it wasn't as potent as it should've been (he had it in his glovebox throughout the whole summer, about 90-100 degrees on average, and forgot about it). It made sense to me at the time that it would've evaporated some or broken down the solution a bit, but we were wrong.

I've never had a bad trip out of all the times I have taken it (including the last time). All of my trips are always wonderful and filled with hallucinations as well as letting my mind work in new and creative ways I never thought possible. The last trip was a bit different though (obviously, considering I took roughly 10ish hits). 

The last trip had a very different vibe. It was like speaking with ""God"" himself while I was peaking (this trip also converted me from an Atheist to a Pantheist). I can't describe it any better than that, so let your imagination go wild. Anyway, after the 12 or so hour long trip, I was finally able to  sleep. When I woke up, I could tell I wasn't feeling the same. The haze was way worse than it was before and lasted about a month. When I ""recovered"", my old self was completely gone. I used to be outgoing, talkative, and had excitement for my hobbies, and afterwards, nothing. 
It was really bad for about 4 years after that. I was depressed, unmotivated, and stopped caring for myself (days without a shower, brushing teeth, etc.). When people talked to me, I just couldn't find anything interesting to say at all. I would just sit there mostly silent. I felt awkward at every turn and always felt like cocooning up back home. 
The past couple years haven't been too bad, but I still feel like I'm missing a large part of myself. I feel emotionless most of the time, easily irritated, unmotivated, and still a lack of passion for my old hobbies. I used to love drawing, painting, coding, hanging out with friends, playing guitar, and playing video games. All of that is gone, and I grow more angry with myself every day for getting into LSD at all. It has affected every aspect of my life and I hate myself for it. 

I can hardly talk to people without my mind going blank still to this day. I even do it when I'm talking with my own best friend (who I've known since I was 5 btw), and actually get irritated whenever he tries to talk to me about anything if I'm already committed to something else (like watching tv or playing a game). I still try to get into my old hobbies, but I grow bored of them too quickly and usually just sit on my phone all day when I'm not working.

At this point, I don't know what to do anymore. I'd like to avoid having to take pills and maybe go a more ""natural"" route, but honestly, right now, I'm open to anything to get my old self back. I just feel lost every day I wake up and feel like a mindless drone drifting through life. Most days, I'm just waiting for it to end so I can move on to another life and start over (and no I'm not suicidal at all, just empty).

TL;DR
I took roughly 10 hits of acid when I was 21 and it messed me up good for going on almost 7 years now. Unmotivated, depressed, and unable to hold conversations with anyone.

Any advice/questions are more than welcome and thank you for taking the time to read part of my story.

Edit: Also I apologize if the formatting isn't right for you, I wrote this on mobile",4.786703707661077,5.297648968586387,5.704167111870928,81.93729618548994,69.13089005235602,8.697467678170744,28.94262207500801,8.724045039944539,2.055907981621968,2988,102,607,47,49,985,336,764,0.09699999999999999,0.752,0.151,0.9921,3,1,1,0,0,0,111.0,1,3,1,6,42,39,1,2,37,0,50,9,3,4,11,108,111,51,1,8,21,0,12,6,2,2,4,2,2,2,34,36,0,5,16,9,0,24,17,13,1,2,44,19,74,26,104,54,29,127,0,4,2,2,30,31,0,12,72,401,108,4,0.05312437568655225,0.0,0.051841727386752835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05319638844991315,0.0,0.058624069591396384,0.08496708808645508,0.08840747255243535,0.0,0.0,0.07225279435864199,0.0557055399069954,0.0,0.0,0.05268510573548082,0.03714579868329623,0.0,0.13115050409961104,0.04729195738272969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816987314618928,0.1330699040748488,0.0,0.0,0.04520493091410189,0.0,0.055750754769514986,0.04698419318815695,0.11599611831408585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05416384156648084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11139979434761237,0.0,0.0,0.04241549121591954,0.05878111125539555,0.0,0.2398257921351532,0.0,0.0915118938698344,0.0,0.0,0.11100733129091453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04437859911511589,0.0,0.04705242870819066,0.0,0.05924772168501893,0.035088149113048014,0.0,0.17903831100582349,0.0,0.047744763387554436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16116768333606307,0.0759041292104502,0.15302319502107573,0.058195156865649016,0.0485547169482958,0.045187566820381435,0.0,0.0,0.08208752174943719,0.0,0.11102117467390604,0.0,0.12076722781754305,0.08911641171389459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04758900592435017,0.05244932261700113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053288080310445775,0.0,0.05231680896068252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02919576755488025,0.21651728300255474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086465468521445,0.11256995286555027,0.15572331926750305,0.05324458071217877,0.0,0.04701340075598779,0.0,0.0,0.05799153156461183,0.0,0.04794682317121887,0.05026756876828268,0.0,0.0,0.1601117273356511,0.057868019067049574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10728095077248276,0.0,0.08480673967379633,0.0564628040295493,0.0,0.0,0.08194558708669247,0.05130785307701021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509742712435823,0.0,0.2229803832046572,0.0,0.035998451834856886,0.04040348158567416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11505704387183525,0.05071322774121955,0.07365950623669534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05021970633950114,0.05988975150246509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05313875189708133,0.0,0.034032835392189265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073585313931667,0.0,0.04224663580225596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11084061967380698,0.0,0.0,0.08789006508013365,0.0,0.053162741475336284,0.0,0.0,0.04089773982567806,0.0,0.0,0.03760170654060276,0.0,0.16970078018733695,0.04441435682603551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05810944456600761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977167642463486,0.17079744344506045,0.046433045901688536,0.04890978764720744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05219442938484972,0.042174820244774716,0.21684075474418785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951156804351979,0.07213592783112757,0.05778406569846866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176480758315514,0.11701798892694512,0.04383317357610796,0.0,0.12650297005150887,0.0,0.0,0.04776519372324814,0.049246828491778916,0.0,0.0593114682732066,0.0,0.10242000482813822,0.057611119297919684,0.07735035641614156,0.0,0.054138277366983414,0.11321409682477855,0.05808316520903554,0.0,0.1368414247642622
mentalhealth,a-cautious-optimist,2020/04/15,"Uncovering childhood trauma? Hi everyone. Recently, I've had an interest in delving into my childhood because I've been drawing many blanks regarding certain people, situations, etc. One event in particular has been picking at me a bit, and I'd like to share it in case someone can have insight regarding what it may mean.

Some background - I'm in my mid-20s, male, in good mental health.

\---

I was told by my parents that when I was right around 2-3 years old, I had a strange habit. Of course by that age I already knew how to walk. What I would do was that I would fill my underwear with socks and other underwear, to the point they were bulging, and walk out into the living room, allegedly looking quite content with myself, displaying it to my parents. Apparently, I would do this frequently.

Another thing I remember is another story my father shared with me. Apparently, right when I was born, the physician that was checking me over made a comment about my genitals, stating something along the lines ""this will be a good one.""

Perhaps one other thing I should add - I was circumcised as a child. I'm sure that this was not pleasant for a baby, let alone anyone.

Knowing what I know today about trauma and how it may manifest, I felt I would share in case I'm onto something. I know it's not good to ignore ""signs"" but at the same time, I don't want to create something where there isn't anything.

\---

What do you think, could you shed some light? If it is something worth looking into, how should I go about it, on my own?",4.618081504702193,6.24451095862069,5.175736677115992,81.43338557993731,70.44827586206897,8.169278996865204,31.112852664576806,8.710501217029153,2.5526206896551717,1198,52,222,21,22,384,164,290,0.044000000000000004,0.875,0.081,0.7929,4,1,4,0,0,0,54.0,0,2,1,1,11,14,0,0,12,0,34,2,0,5,2,49,50,12,0,9,4,3,1,1,0,9,2,0,1,2,23,14,0,1,9,0,2,4,4,3,0,3,16,4,32,11,34,22,6,39,0,0,2,0,14,21,0,5,14,158,55,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11818027200880946,0.12591973388527036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23930193894466856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978615469307059,0.0,0.0939002056677742,0.10157927844403383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06955846973341506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12457511438251992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09110502569588658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12725928786392265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10903397426143736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1095604594360194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06484954599210646,0.2871222074662313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212902335977384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18813040309434265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668197348400534,0.0,0.05574683760033816,0.0,0.10075842905310643,0.0,0.19164201183146712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10797064970888036,0.0,0.11568642460420915,0.0,0.12429579884471252,0.0,0.0,0.11499285513401047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973593231612965,0.0,0.2319652409114984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534042813510584,0.0,0.0,0.07910731452193748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10786784510426517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213666685817862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11266673720518308,0.0,0.12926080438004406,0.1948932334583697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12826086752022045,0.0,0.0,0.09668235408878507,0.3513800765625585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10754434501901168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516150266185361,0.07311505476815641,0.0,0.0,0.06653661523373545,0.0,0.10815994086805716,0.10903397426143736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730316983597967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3242328971381982,0.0,0.0,0.07348106294434886
mentalhealth,thefullbeat,2020/04/15,"I feel like I don’t belong. Everyday. All the time. No matter what I do in life I constantly feel like I’m misplaced. No matter where I live or who I’m with or what I’m doing i feel uncomfortable, as though I don’t belong. I’ve moved from an aunts house, to my mothers and I’ve been thinking about trying living with a boyfriend to see if I can finally feel like I’m comfortable. I’ve never felt like I’m “home”. I’ve lost my job due the virus and feel useless, where do I go? What do I do? Once again I’m feeling lost, misplaced. I so badly want to feel secure and grounded. These time are so hard and I’m struggling.",0.037243107769423744,2.127009015037593,2.2409323308270683,94.78871679197998,86.66917293233082,5.050426065162909,19.392982456140352,6.42735559955562,-0.004297844611528936,481,14,110,5,15,162,70,133,0.172,0.67,0.158,-0.5915,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,2,7,11,0,1,4,0,10,1,0,0,2,23,31,11,0,2,3,2,9,4,0,0,1,0,1,0,5,6,0,1,9,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,4,10,13,6,9,27,1,14,0,3,1,0,3,4,0,3,12,58,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12325548717656383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15952342230137312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5224833152683338,0.31637658569875104,0.14173714622224548,0.161709121096778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08389513543521683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223740146731205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14807363870210968,0.0,0.0,0.17033221363423895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648882782215153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10426748616337717,0.2884762518543881,0.0,0.2607001150841973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32228659927901565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689536562908632,0.0,0.0,0.11385267760460688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15720914712522993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11763302859028504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543231651679666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458813208768513,0.14503466880340993,0.0,0.17215535624920505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002234388335999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08706936127658009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thewaysforward,2020/04/15,"I heard on the radio that setting up a new routine during covid-19 lockdown can help with mental health. . 
What's your new routine? Bonus points for any apps or resources that have helped you. Cheers",4.003333333333334,7.044391555555558,2.342222222222226,94.30000000000004,77.8888888888889,3.6,25.66666666666667,3.1291,0.248133333333334,160,6,28,0,4,44,33,36,0.0,0.763,0.237,0.8519,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,2,4,2,0,6,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,2,15,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263041975745532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35373330812998205,0.0,0.0,0.4461155422634589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353675052912404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6428087728887724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31458798089325873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DqrkAngel42,2020/04/15,"Is it possible to have age dysphoria, but instead of feeling younger, I feel older? I feel much older than I actually am. If I could guess.... maybe 30? sometimes younger, sometimes older. It's weird cuz im 14. not 30. idk, someone help plz.",-0.13683574879227225,1.8019615000000009,2.0511594202898564,89.46026570048313,107.91304347826087,4.6531400966183565,26.850241545893716,6.42735559955562,1.5730560386473431,183,10,35,3,9,61,35,46,0.045,0.767,0.188,0.6709,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,9,8,3,0,2,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,3,7,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,4,19,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.25922533501571193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120911179960476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40294516418035947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2926312955065111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1780522153343538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.286935692703972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26687006941268376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19527522220832927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29946804784134856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22507505390129096,0.0,0.5254475062750066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yellowfruitpunch,2020/04/15,"Explaining How I Feel In A Metaphorical Sense My brain is a house, and in my house i have parties. At those parties, those guest i know drop by; happiness, sadness, anger, fear, disgust, but like every party, the guest eventually leave. One day, someone new knocks on the door, I don’t know who they are or where they came from, but they showed up uninvited, and went inside my house. “Maybe it’s just another houseguest” I thought, but this houseguest was different, they’re always here, and they won’t leave. I try to throw more parties, and invite more guest, but this new stranger, they kicked them out. Happiness, sadness, anger and all those other guest, they won’t come in. This new stranger seems to make themself at home. They’re always in my house, just sitting, or pondering around. They take anything i have; energy, motivation, enthusiasm, emotion. And no matter how hard i try, it seems as if the guest just takes more and more of the things in my house. I’m trying to kick them out, but they’re stubborn . They are stealing everything in my house, i’ll eventually have and feel nothing.

~ lately i’ve been feeling weird, out of nowhere it seems as if i’ve become emotionally numb. I don’t feel anything anymore, no emotions. I’m apathetic. I lost all motivation to do things, i don’t find things appealing anymore. it seems as if i’m going around in circles and i’m so confused for ive never felt this way before. i’ve been having nightmares and flashbacks, and i lost my appetite. i feel blank, and just, well nothing. i don’t know if i explained this good, i hope my metaphor makes sense. may someone please explain what this is?",4.132859262923572,6.171472729903537,4.251848874598071,85.88374907247095,72.50482315112541,7.099727924808311,28.681795696265148,7.882392219407189,1.805933860994311,1293,52,248,18,26,400,150,311,0.162,0.684,0.155,-0.0973,2,0,0,0,0,0,60.0,0,0,10,4,12,19,4,2,6,0,20,2,1,6,3,67,52,29,0,5,15,0,7,1,5,3,1,0,2,0,19,19,0,1,21,1,0,5,9,13,1,1,9,7,35,6,28,40,6,31,0,4,0,0,19,17,0,13,7,150,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13194079153753516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313587999018371,0.0,0.0,0.1572562669712151,0.0,0.0,0.13048747141584438,0.1411586172590984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756262572132598,0.06746459540135212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850683805622364,0.0,0.09067943974404476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06829589358987945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05113143223863769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283459946389563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675504982914545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06679994288842787,0.0,0.07125508388886444,0.0,0.0,0.08921621290844252,0.2004411231284657,0.0,0.07612479236491558,0.0,0.07246387213749893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04505875795903388,0.06649941210310181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16879796141586345,0.07102262884417508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07952802283207312,0.07874661065017621,0.0,0.5488965204208889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13071675627143606,0.0,0.08943547520289788,0.16789999675911185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0387340146177886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730950643922252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10584498055737374,0.0,0.07965114044923524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06114848276435874,0.2297180957092909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15214971091811846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0537246919529317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08702970217786431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2887076377953628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13435365583982467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11922296183867415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580177166125876,0.0,0.0,0.06294240752950414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614852988363929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06293171651127734,0.0,0.0,0.07128557446375566,0.0734967909874894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RumorIntelligence,2020/04/15,"Meth-Induced Schizophrenia Not sure if this is the right sub. Perhaps I am just venting.

My sister has just about every single mental health issue you can name. Anxiety, depression, meth-induced schizophrenia, PTSD etc. Because of the shutdown she (28F) is now living with me (26M) and my family. My parents adopted her daughter (9) because she went to prison for a while. Her halfway house was shut down to stop the spread of COVID. She is also in recovery from a nasty heroin addiction. She was doing great for a few months then things have just gone downhill fast.

​

I struggle with PTSD and depression. Passively suicidal all the time. Hearing her when she is in a bad state, she repeats herself constantly, is extremely irritable, and is constantly hearing voices. I heard her last night while I was taking a nap before work saying that she can ""feel them in her eyes"". among other things said. 

​

It hurts me so much because she is in so much pain. I feel terrible because I think it would be a mercy if she wasn't alive any longer. Frankly, I don't want her near my family or her own daughter. While I do want to be as supportive as possible to my sister; it is an extremely toxic situation in our house. Whenever my sister is staying at our house, my dad casually mentions being passively suicidal because those two personalities are extremely conflicting. I don't want my niece raised in this toxic environment and while I think it sounds cruel to kick my sister to the curb, she made her choices. 

​

I don't know what I need right now.",4.467069470322066,6.928555058823534,4.995519031141871,79.04492613787599,72.80622837370242,8.044769763108864,29.800505722651053,8.841846274778883,2.749028639872238,1248,54,212,26,26,398,163,289,0.215,0.752,0.033,-0.9945,1,0,2,0,0,0,53.0,2,1,1,1,10,12,1,1,12,0,28,4,1,1,2,30,46,18,2,7,7,8,2,0,0,1,3,7,0,1,12,6,0,3,5,2,0,2,5,8,0,1,9,10,46,4,26,33,7,34,0,3,1,0,39,13,0,3,17,154,58,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554083796815584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07008589774140274,0.0,0.28487461008635123,0.3194775872737844,0.059598393577967486,0.0,0.0670445719159332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07317597044131154,0.2671234966311573,0.0,0.07457542059648338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18941600901386446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15096888407796913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774207535986584,0.0,0.0,0.07384071314871822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652389064774693,0.0,0.08862711455221893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662371463553518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315751605810108,0.1975539230451161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3033753380629747,0.09382072899797754,0.0,0.0,0.09147367938310204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048164804171023375,0.07143852283285429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738797011170749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08292734901819973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832078586179933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06995363285265943,0.0,0.12885137502323574,0.0649841548057933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08224446291796153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325543367802322,0.0,0.09731415592554747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652410931110998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880124396610733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20489358741185776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14968863516024966,0.08336597271534507,0.06969506578223439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09851134317432547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934128742229036,0.0,0.07327119572680574,0.0,0.09162064611828494,0.0,0.19172847658467215,0.09945314759648888,0.08259992376050093,0.0,0.06589458123170941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164486113837368,0.11231270130525124,0.0,0.0,0.05110375022151808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0856118158619503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15507751791995775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08124341467960541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0638031653447585,0.0,0.0,0.06225713815897774,0.0,0.3194775872737844,0.0
mentalhealth,NoisyNoah,2020/04/15,"Life is hard .. I'm really struggling with suicidal ideation, and I'm only not killing myself because I don't want to hurt my grandma.",4.453461538461539,6.121099730769237,5.364615384615386,79.75538461538463,70.92307692307692,8.276923076923078,36.07692307692308,8.841846274778883,3.3905230769230768,107,6,19,2,2,35,23,26,0.31,0.503,0.18600000000000005,-0.4917,0,0,0,0,0,1,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,5,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,5,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,9,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201233990317944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3234749528815082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3865653532379448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3995039945797756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25505582989022196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746330596388329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2313301068404881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3775004501549655,0.0,0.3949851331805603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129863202380519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,----Michel----,2020/04/15,"Can someone please give me advice? Im clueless on how to help a struggling friend My friend has been struggling with non-diagnosed depression (im almost certain he suffers from it) and anxiety. I won't go into detail about what he's talked about, but its all stuff that worries me. He has mentioned he has had the thought of suicide but he knows how it would affect others, making him not go through with it. He hasn't spoken to any adults or professionals about his issues and has only told me and another person who he believes he drove away because of the stuff he told them. (problems he has yet to tell me) and he has expressed he only plans on getting help once he gets a job and moves into his own place, making it so no one has to know what he's been going through, which would happen, in theory, in about 6-8 years or so. He doesn't plan on getting help before then, and he never wants anyone to worry about him or give him empathy. This has been going on for a while, and with the pandemic going on its hard to reach out to professionals in person. I don't know what to do.",5.384110797459421,5.441756839449543,5.889449541284403,82.70597388849686,67.76146788990826,8.3590684544813,28.695836273817925,7.882392219407189,1.7095493295695134,853,26,171,9,13,276,118,218,0.131,0.794,0.075,-0.9327,1,0,0,0,0,1,23.0,0,0,1,2,10,8,0,2,6,0,20,0,0,5,3,36,41,18,1,4,6,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,16,13,0,0,4,0,0,7,7,5,0,1,8,1,13,3,34,30,2,25,0,2,0,0,39,13,0,4,5,114,29,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10987045407444933,0.0,0.0,0.1125876914063903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07645984578595431,0.11789819420881,0.0860126812440235,0.0,0.0,0.07861736183719596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10563664644876193,0.0,0.0,0.06853950293644713,0.0,0.0956741417999854,0.1266760578024801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684034167782002,0.11411944218119816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17373443642217926,0.0,0.17622837919057674,0.2157163310600944,0.3194978027110073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09942614654140973,0.0,0.10071992609784704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260889939057207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428987921970375,0.11735322043464265,0.11157466608306342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18537446790790132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15010284458713158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11950090863788265,0.0,0.0,0.08671701914236883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973990342114195,0.07618905539248669,0.17102419352376474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963482988574377,0.11747093668770313,0.12342017346195493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10758537798473773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09526604764836548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2350835333791044,0.2574229907701165,0.12298594703951353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09037121887371406,0.0982733902689704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08926105296244842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148734561788176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06631724108199198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283669686069289,0.0,0.15974159358785278,0.0,0.0,0.07240463381022383
mentalhealth,blank-senpai,2020/04/15,"Idk who else to turn to This is my first time posting on this subreddit so apologises if I'm not doing anything correctly and apologises for being confusing.    


I'm 15 and ever since I was 12 I've had issues with my dad, it eventually led to me developing depression and anxiety. During 2019 I was seeing a few therapists but my dad didn't like it.   
After my parents got a divorce and my mum moved to a different country, my mental health got a lot worse. I eventually was admitted to a mental hospital for attempting to commit suicide.  I spent a few days there and my dad wanted me to fake being fine to get discharged. From then onwards if I ever did any small thing wrong, he'd threaten to break my neck or send me back to the mental hospital, saying ""I'm crazy"". I wanted to live with my mum but it isn't possible to move to where she is, so I have to stay with my dad until I'm 18. 

Since the beginning of 2020 things, have gotten a bit better. I try my best to help my dad so he doesn't make everyday life unbearable. But if I ever do one small thing wrong he starts verbally abusing me...  Telling me I'm worthless, useless, it's better if he killed me when I was just born and much more. I'm used to those insults and I know that's not okay. I met my best friend and now boyfriend last year and ever since we've met, he helped me learn how to treat myself better and be happier. Everything started to get better, but all good things don't always last long.

Today I displeased my dad by just asking my younger brother a normal question which had the word 'what' in it. I had asked him, 'What do you want?' and immediately I get yelled at and threatened to be beaten (my dad has beaten me when I was smaller for anything small like crying). He starts spouting about how useless I am, I was used to all of that so it didn't make me sad anymore. He then brought my boyfriend into it, saying that he influenced me to become an even worse person.  I was always yelled at for being happy and that made me scared of smiling, laughing in my family. But lately, I've been happier, smiling more, laughing more etc. He then points out the time I spent with my boyfriend in VC (voice chat) is making me more useless and disgraceful. 

If I don't stop showing I'm happy, he'll make sure to get rid of my boyfriend. Like I mentioned earlier my boyfriend has helped me become happier. He is the only person who supported me when I was in a dark time so to me if he isn't there, it's hard to keep going. This may sound stupid and dramatic but he's my escape. 

I don't want to feel trapped like before. I need help to cope with all this.",2.905482601853471,4.4650634999999985,4.340003497114882,85.98296467913973,74.71428571428572,7.3548522468963125,25.529987760097928,8.057270187336151,1.4702304948417548,2050,70,422,32,43,681,236,532,0.16699999999999998,0.652,0.18100000000000002,0.8833,2,1,0,0,1,2,56.0,0,1,0,10,23,37,5,2,15,1,40,3,1,11,10,77,86,42,2,12,17,11,2,4,1,2,2,6,0,2,26,22,0,2,5,2,2,6,10,16,0,2,24,9,67,21,53,54,15,55,0,6,1,0,50,14,0,11,36,271,93,3,0.0,0.08817339661472644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12384380582528474,0.0,0.0,0.050606927087406016,0.0,0.05692971838439425,0.0,0.07380285643523632,0.0,0.0,0.12247967352885655,0.0,0.13914194030443386,0.0,0.0,0.0572230013098594,0.0,0.0,0.16437810764988478,0.06332440601274976,0.0,0.15619461678861646,0.2632673972033596,0.08124539893647646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174489696372245,0.047993581756928486,0.0,0.06409628557358665,0.0,0.0,0.07775117863154189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062166855956105126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299596321564419,0.049152518447438086,0.26926208531898643,0.0,0.0,0.06688227856118681,0.0,0.07015485477111387,0.0,0.03762807732597515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330008187601154,0.0,0.0,0.05749531578445796,0.0,0.1555217494839636,0.0,0.04229357734161842,0.06241845439929203,0.11903806361177008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15843911282996254,0.06666408889382053,0.0,0.0,0.0791030653641479,0.0,0.0,0.19952379992817312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07767326508392228,0.0,0.0661463143961158,0.08233271099001692,0.0,0.04089829585210936,0.1213215289604972,0.08394696966607777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052563774614466985,0.14542789168562745,0.0,0.06571263293803528,0.06585776412686803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326769139307659,0.0,0.07041629905386161,0.1986989022420612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249881231058632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15818953617160014,0.054705938779896233,0.055180151454774166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07291403433657259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050427697459654086,0.05659839359386665,0.0,0.0,0.08263260295856772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299582014830575,0.0,0.0,0.07034925194613174,0.08389533759826423,0.07127206335267951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08336541405204229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836067721454133,0.07450559935064363,0.0,0.05930166948063136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846785091718337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15802075240026084,0.07931989825596787,0.0,0.06221694641656093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814014309161421,0.08444889009372834,0.07013827165835369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06504478585918859,0.0,0.0,0.08640526457980674,0.19776057816112105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301815505129378,0.0,0.07053975096332761,0.0,0.0,0.05052507204097662,0.08094563056207989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12854686016708014,0.0,0.0,0.17557512702652153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516770045874908,0.0,0.1627292360292135,0.0,0.047922880125628495
mentalhealth,CricketsAreGolden,2020/04/15,"All I want to do is be with my friends, and when I'm not I feel my life is meaningless. I have become very close with a couple I've known for a long time. Friends since childhood with him, and since teens with her, but we've never really been close. Now we talk, play games or hang out almost every day. We've become family to each other. I think our deeper friendship formed at a time where we all needed it and now they're the realest friends I've ever had. I've never been this close with anyone.

To give some context about myself, I struggle with depression and purpose. I'm constantly in a state of confusion and frustration with life. I have nothing I want except to live freely and be with the people I love. I hate working, I struggle with the feeling that I have nothing to live for. I have things I enjoy, I make music, art, photography. I used to think I wanted to pursue a career within my passions, but not even that doesn't spark any sense of purpose in me. 

I've always said the meaning of life is what you personally make of it. For me I've always thought that I should make the most of it, do what I want, and enjoy it. But I can't. I can't just tell myself to enjoy something. The only thing that makes me feel peaceful and forget about my lack of purpose is being with my friends. Then it all disappears mostly. So from that I've inferred that my sense of meaning comes from being around my friends, showing and feeling love.

But even then it comes back. When I'm with my friends for prolonged periods of time and then go home, it comes back really hard. I'll be debilitated for days, crying and feeling no hope for life. I'm tearing up just writing this because I'm in it right now. I see no escape, I see no way of getting better, I have to work everyday, I'm not free, society tells me I have to have kids and a family, and even though I know caring for people gives me purpose I feel that finding a girl and having kids for the sole reason of me feeling purpose is just wrong. Especially with the way I feel about life currently. 

It's not fair to my friends to feel this way, because they do love me and I love them. But I'm really frustrated. I can't help myself, I can't make myself feel better. I'm already in therapy, and that's helped me be more aware of my patterns and my relationships, but it doesn't change how I feel about life. I truly feel like I'm doomed. Like I'm not built for this world and that content is unachievable for me. I really don't know what to do except be with my friends. I feel horrible all the time. Its more than depression. Depression is a consequence of this, this is existential dread or discontent or something.

What do I do? Is there any specific form of therapy for this stuff, because psychotherapy isn't doing much to alleviate this feeling.",3.297456088415238,4.894193172291296,4.400878626406161,85.7941263074798,73.76021314387211,7.420074995066114,25.83260311821591,8.094773233980128,1.5111561791987378,2208,75,448,34,45,721,216,563,0.14400000000000002,0.662,0.19399999999999998,0.9851,1,0,2,0,0,0,64.0,3,1,2,4,24,36,3,4,17,0,43,11,0,9,7,115,102,35,0,8,19,0,15,2,8,1,6,1,1,4,36,42,0,0,25,4,1,6,18,12,0,0,5,18,68,25,69,89,14,50,1,4,2,5,35,15,0,9,27,306,104,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060540527219018765,0.0,0.06671753824283118,0.0,0.10061275124841873,0.0,0.0,0.08222780513827667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04227403968176637,0.0,0.0,0.053820947560482314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297782086250067,0.0,0.11056495407098682,0.1335434868579195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694138867150467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06164154410086661,0.0,0.06395715327202442,0.15623912073679344,0.0,0.06533423866067095,0.0,0.0,0.06689626062250574,0.06641090306641273,0.07798155540605357,0.0,0.1562186399244095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197969509778031,0.05468824021979984,0.0509389549579136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398992311190613,0.0,0.4279753922464096,0.043191616333389256,0.0,0.0,0.05525804004134143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37368114562835214,0.0,0.031587108838983684,0.11599474373261075,0.03436000006719132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054159005760359466,0.05969032364863178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104821358055349,0.0,0.060644877791305535,0.06004900422890304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664529007265439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562220667260968,0.05907400936705011,0.0,0.10677205448612492,0.05350393421550336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.218264888865206,0.0,0.20178283333784566,0.0,0.0,0.1317142191612495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044444007300922,0.044829265502399206,0.0932587566573512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11602326193994765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04598146881688588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382872356947414,0.05279009358349829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15492523890723509,0.062161481976224675,0.0,0.0649098809648275,0.0,0.05163129064573423,0.05750994740011299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635530950151963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002391200438436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09308792582579364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640885405412072,0.06921060102061434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048594310512076605,0.10568691451375067,0.0,0.1382792935306951,0.0,0.08033197835238841,0.07747882420186386,0.05940024059772061,0.047997353342700014,0.14101551947210922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052216795097535365,0.0,0.04988465411479772,0.14264013014789234,0.14396760240407994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880291217968927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06610195817363088,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hellokatieface,2020/04/15,"How can I be providing therapy when I'm a mess myself? My company has started doing telehealth with our families and clients since our early intervention clinic is closed due to Covid. All of my sessions are done on the bed or bedroom floor because of HIPPA, and the fact that my husband is also working from home. We're in a 1 bedroom apartment. Even parks and trails are chained up and locked, so there's very few options for a safe change of scenery. I feel guilty saying I can't take any more clients ( I have 4 clients and will soon have 6) because I'm the only clinician without kids or family to take care of, and we're being paid our full salary ( at least for this month). I'm having a harder and harder time holding myself together. I can't sleep, I'm crying on and off all the time, and I'm becoming anxious about everything. I don't know how to say no, or even if I can, and I just want to unplug everything and make these responsibilities go away. But I can't - because my clients and their families are hurting even more.  I don't know how long I can maintain this.",6.171170542635658,5.821083632558143,6.600290697674421,79.6533042635659,66.16279069767441,9.585271317829458,34.195736434108525,9.075114841892004,2.8164806201550387,851,35,170,13,12,277,129,215,0.062,0.888,0.05,-0.3063,1,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,3,0,1,1,13,4,0,0,8,0,22,2,1,4,3,35,38,23,0,2,7,1,1,0,0,1,1,2,4,1,4,14,0,2,3,0,1,1,7,2,0,0,2,3,21,2,21,33,7,21,0,1,0,0,8,11,0,5,9,113,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802528092878607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10036422977555184,0.0,0.0,0.16673131565252158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138662856927314,0.0,0.0,0.2699030197107465,0.16299826047281407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15047479585416665,0.0,0.15612749035412662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1621174035656386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15103275535710134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2924394903677161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2652833815352485,0.0,0.4173957026845896,0.0,0.0746244282375371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838771005995464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14804180749130988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579949498226714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16221992515926145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13060986216209078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985154771713799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11780254566885486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112246573868651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347342328024178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12208550222854705,0.0,0.14769359851867725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10446284738723163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219341326054778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1687786116360216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17211834822074626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12177474224034515,0.08705064408142442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14226861382219896,0.0,0.10744510317533376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hasenmona,2020/04/15,"Can't connect with anyone anymore In the past few months my mental health dropped just like rain. Despite all the treatment I do, the medication I take, I feel worse than ever and suicidal thoughts are somewhat recurrent. I no longer enjoy any of the things I used to, especially art. I cant open up to anyone because I feel like all of my friendships are falling apart and I have no energy to go after anyone to reconnect or smth. Thing is everything now is just pointless, since I dont feel like improving my skills to establish a career, I'm too exhausted to go after people and I don't want to annoy them with all I've been suffering since I have nothing else to talk about anymore. This is just the top of the iceberg but I'm feeling so disconnected from everything that not even the words make sense in my head anymore.",5.9573291925465846,6.501734577639756,6.446763975155282,77.5183447204969,66.5776397515528,9.669813664596274,33.49130434782609,9.642632912329526,3.1367957763975163,661,28,123,13,10,215,99,161,0.10099999999999999,0.799,0.1,-0.0118,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,2,9,7,1,0,8,0,13,4,1,2,4,26,26,6,1,1,6,0,4,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,5,1,0,3,7,3,0,0,2,4,16,4,21,24,5,16,0,1,0,0,2,6,0,2,9,83,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986729919432105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4317007025051482,0.3043719313615124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08845162779915079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17005614736113667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212124511392836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583719731442727,0.13125127874986264,0.0,0.0,0.2608130907538895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2934677274051227,0.20731897213172176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16492737482642414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14891448587836795,0.154234540221713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2126656271753519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09685539267278913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14617300878159192,0.1462266962004339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11581745474127204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13922738630045586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13851439122160503,0.10059408677479018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24005647838319186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15871587545874052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10909716005133024,0.11662590291886504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19279601685628808,0.0,0.0,0.11519321114592315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12531983295176066,0.0,0.0,0.08558375350766695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786932059500912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hodiehodie,2020/04/15,"I feel to exhausted to go to school I’ve struggled with some bad stuff for some time now and it has led me to a state of pretty bad exhaustion and I haven’t felt like going to school, my teachers have talked a lot with my parents about going another year in school and I really want to avoid that, does anyone have any tips on how to get up and just go to school anyways? If so please let me know, thanks🤍",3.3296862745098035,4.1774170470588246,3.956176470588237,91.93112745098044,72.6470588235294,7.549019607843138,23.57843137254902,7.793537801064563,0.8166078431372554,319,8,73,4,6,101,59,85,0.177,0.715,0.10800000000000001,-0.7635,1,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,6,7,0,2,2,0,5,2,0,2,0,18,14,7,0,2,2,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,6,0,1,3,0,0,5,1,6,0,0,1,2,7,1,16,12,3,12,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,4,4,46,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10895382805799138,0.16800268753006134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120282474537276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675509060830366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020797238852867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08101110466648652,0.0,0.15383453818596488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370736442507007,0.0,0.3642226405628021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.088051698662504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16383390137224782,0.0,0.07827448937072094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362117316027034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779032818804082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758714030879139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629994459618312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10263984192060542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6485972377953421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16749478508467755,0.1834114363312871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287772704920432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934244847970566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450080899136527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10317522801242847
mentalhealth,Snow_Da_92,2020/04/15,"Use discord to keep date night alive for long distance relationships and stave off the loneliness. Watch hulu and other streaming services with friends and family So I dont know if this really belongs here, but it got removed from r/youshouldknow because post about social media are banned.

Also it deals with loneliness and its helped me and my girlfriend.

A little backstory first. If you dont care for the back story skip to the line of dashes.


Back in november I moved out of state for school leaving my girlfriend of 6 years behind. I wasn't too far away from her but it meant instead of seeing her whenever I wanted I could only see her about once a week. Due to some scheduling conflicts i didn't get to see her in January or February, and by the time I got time to see her we were in full blown covid panic. My girlfriends mother (who she lives with) was potentially exposed to the virus at her church and I'm an essential employee so I am high risk. Her mother is elderly and not in the best health so we dont want to run the risk of me accidentally exposing her.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

So anyways Discord has an option to stream your computer screen to your voice chat servers. You can stream hulu, disney+, amazon prime video, Netflix, and any other web based streaming platform. You can also stream media player apps and such. 

So my girlfriend and I have been keeping our bad horror movie date nights alive by streaming them. Is it as good as watching them while cuddling on the couch? No. But is it better than being lonely and missing the date nights you used to have before the coronapocalypse? Absolutely. This might be common knowledge to most people but I felt like people should know in case there's someone out there who misses going to the movies with friends or having bad horror movie nights with their long distance girlfriend.

Stay safe out there friends.",5.220421603159352,7.144790899135451,5.030867755363435,81.88431849717153,69.4034582132565,7.446216245063508,28.12562706799018,8.045849151850463,1.9011206959120508,1490,53,262,20,27,459,205,347,0.192,0.728,0.08,-0.9928,1,2,0,0,0,0,124.0,3,6,3,3,19,17,0,3,15,0,24,2,0,2,0,51,46,30,0,6,9,2,1,1,8,2,1,1,1,0,12,22,0,5,5,3,0,4,7,8,0,1,9,9,37,9,47,32,4,44,1,3,7,1,38,17,0,8,21,180,49,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.162435024536762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06906429706378611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09541898307751577,0.15618677476779888,0.16959675108954253,0.06191004628309876,0.0,0.08642009780002483,0.0,0.10658097650368696,0.08982158557196533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10354721024338767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08108741292141594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470392238113016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3570827654328769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09574174938562416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751354709896824,0.0,0.0,0.086386902158594,0.0,0.0,0.2353950613671334,0.0,0.05306091934651957,0.0,0.05771890050480182,0.08518372730771663,0.1624536532910155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107953553384694,0.0,0.0,0.06807354142316638,0.10730373843962226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805424265036953,0.0,0.0,0.11162946326514347,0.0,0.0,0.10753739835113194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04961709636799797,0.10178982202652537,0.08967935939357649,0.17975484572532702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10773913310590397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079422299210969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3812288001613179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10815810802728514,0.0,0.07724097259943427,0.0,0.11915880256001345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14081786221447254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09726642653557628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06506195017959082,0.0,0.0,0.10903745500177643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102784163494481,0.3237207515338758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352765186773737,0.08605147639583871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082494696182165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844093018229356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17543050029223306,0.0,0.0,0.11980546367721785,0.0,0.08146532300798569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06540132388264057
mentalhealth,M_Steffen_A123,2020/04/15,"Lack of purpose or motivation I dont know if this is the right place to be posting this , but here goes

About a month ago corona virus came to norway which lead to everything that was a necessity getting shut down. Which means gyms, hang out spots and pretty much everything social in my life. 

I am 18 years old and basically live by myself. I am an apprentice line worker and only work with guys way older than me. So I dont get to be around many guys my age. My dad works away and so does my mom and brother. They only get back weekends meaning im alone the whole work week. They work in key positions so they arent sent home or quarintined.

So basically my life consits of work and being home. I play video games but I dont have anyone to play with so i end up spending the day alone and can go the 7/8 hrs i spend at home without saying a word. 

I have now realised my life is pretty sad. I have realised i have nothing I look forward too. Cant be with friends. Family isnt home. And my motivation for working out and eating healty is at the so far gone I cant catch it. I bascially eat like trash and spend my days sleeping or living in my own little corner with s population of 1

Any help on this from people who are or have been in similar positions would be greatly appreciated",2.9555549520188293,4.461843650190115,4.459304725692559,85.39785804816223,74.47528517110266,7.442983885569438,24.69110990403766,8.11559375814309,1.338372587361941,1012,32,212,16,21,338,157,263,0.053,0.83,0.11699999999999999,0.9593,2,2,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,3,10,12,6,0,0,9,0,27,6,1,3,0,35,38,23,0,3,8,3,0,1,1,1,3,1,4,2,8,18,2,0,5,6,3,8,8,1,0,0,5,2,28,5,31,27,4,42,0,1,1,0,15,20,0,5,15,134,36,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08240573564804288,0.0,0.0,0.19256243460361208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06321775566256342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500161124274965,0.0,0.0,0.08275642300520042,0.0,0.0,0.0873414226194686,0.07148250097930739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632444861029637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11990637248693235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135219751694928,0.0,0.326854423720541,0.0,0.0,0.19024789539308085,0.0,0.0,0.08233727062900241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16709758080880685,0.0,0.08763686559752798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07182267397358577,0.0,0.14570736445986945,0.0,0.052832787769552934,0.0,0.0,0.10249159442607296,0.0,0.18409517864997185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062310871053976764,0.0,0.37299626907951017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041556020679873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05108981364800759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969867003309737,0.04541683052215815,0.09317294711427462,0.16417535748991338,0.0,0.07806517057231578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942494851032038,0.0,0.2025270481248725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10887667329332304,0.07420186021629525,0.0,0.06833820723999824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0892001216882648,0.0,0.09754861045931816,0.0,0.0,0.14140449235065608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06444856159309925,0.0,0.097126130672106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08903247333738444,0.18915276923475585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07938955225901898,0.0,0.07392759057748141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302973624127672,0.09476366340265424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378938463942684,0.07456899011270872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378942275012464,0.0,0.08961262879391152,0.0,0.4060672788423133,0.0,0.0,0.0660379636447062,0.0,0.0,0.059864866349141274
mentalhealth,hottothotsky,2020/04/15,"I feel like my mental health issues are exacerbated by my strong social conscience - and at the moment I feel terrible and conflicted. I do a lot of activism work. I have always cared about the world, about all of the injustices perpetuated against women, against minorities, against animals, against the environment etc. I realised a long time ago that doing nothing made the general depression and anxiety I feel much, much worse. 

I got caught up in a group last year that was really bad for my mental health. They were/are very controlling and there was a lot of sexism and stuff that they didn't address (which, for leftists, is obviously an ideological inconsistency). I left. 

But since then, I've felt really adrift. Politically that group aligned with me perfectly - and all the other groups around my area don't. It makes me feel very disillusioned with the whole thing, and totally powerless. 

I want to help people. I want to make a difference. But I've mostly given up on activist circles, they're too toxic. But, coming to this realisation (in the middle of a crisis, where I literally can't do anything except stay at home alone with my own thoughts) has put me in a really, really bad place. For the first time in a long time I'm at a ""can't get out of bed, no appetite, no desire to do anything"" depressive episode. And I really can't see any way out of it. 

I feel like I should use this time to do...something. But I can't stop thinking about all the suffering, and how stupid and pathetic I am for giving up over personal conflicts. 

This is a bit of a rant, so, any advice would be nice.",5.458257647429832,6.732040149006625,6.311948912015136,75.42310154525389,68.03973509933775,9.990791548407444,30.274992116051717,10.181067101454742,3.0967468937243767,1263,48,235,32,21,417,169,302,0.17,0.732,0.09699999999999999,-0.9756,1,1,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,2,5,9,13,1,0,22,0,21,2,0,6,6,54,44,17,0,5,5,0,6,2,0,2,2,0,3,2,13,17,0,4,8,0,0,3,8,7,0,1,9,7,26,6,43,32,13,39,0,3,1,0,10,21,0,3,15,160,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001334525355889,0.09083433815300786,0.0,0.0,0.10612902829395696,0.0,0.0,0.0852640614433175,0.0,0.0,0.13936755615296526,0.0,0.0783900167461862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686497655612221,0.09122089442528103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17111797075848315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187176687188413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1044759901396665,0.0,0.0,0.08826967307858156,0.0,0.0,0.11492991372061938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17651620426280293,0.0,0.0,0.1070603608788102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114282226067074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2590620237916505,0.14641057254436926,0.09838820728486293,0.0,0.0,0.08716176048493728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053536856023628315,0.09829949816499656,0.0,0.0,0.08195540101703883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21784371307447128,0.0,0.0,0.06868413572690213,0.0,0.10278674466327394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10695307694212502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352752267867629,0.0,0.0,0.11133501607603208,0.0,0.0,0.10012428647217687,0.0,0.0,0.1813671797184492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17423432008949982,0.0,0.09696051585510404,0.13680034537527005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20653328628674286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506559167609532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832366585897624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07104047298631898,0.08947370441721461,0.1070603608788102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030116343177346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3282276581596496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165610151582617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08476505088192632,0.0,0.0,0.10445625633267364,0.0,0.07888716418900425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922042702912042,0.0,0.08567032491816667,0.0,0.0,0.11730475242407885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06807716371048889,0.06565926431126731,0.0,0.08135050942845404,0.2390066023946487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08850202325899219,0.0,0.1690985749120781,0.12088007404930046,0.08133669172091477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114405186103259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460009150489763,0.0,0.10442667965914336,0.0727924418545221,0.0,0.0,0.06598794939065224
mentalhealth,-throw_it_away_now,2020/04/15,Help with a number? Hi I'd just like some help please. Someone to call. I'm not doing okay. Can I get a number to call please?,-2.481428571428573,-0.9247577142857129,0.07971428571428517,104.46528571428571,108.28571428571428,2.24,9.17142857142857,3.1291,-2.278322857142857,96,1,24,0,5,32,20,28,0.052000000000000005,0.467,0.48100000000000004,0.8955,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,11,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5891194138894685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15071345602398994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3867101745703396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14093167181406627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6333059739061433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.244419349745668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Mad-Mady,2020/04/15,"I’m not suicidal because I kinda don’t care anymore. It worse but at-least I don’t want to die. So, I have a bleeding heart. 

I literally lie awake at night and I think about farm animals and modern slaves and the environment and politics and all this horrible stuff. 

COVID19 didn’t really get under my skin cos I was like: “cool stack it on, I don’t give a shit” 

And I used to just think about offing myself because I can’t watch this anymore, and because I realized I could never have children because I’d be dooming them to a fucked planet. It’d be cruel to have kids honestly. 

Anyway, and I’m getting closer to this numb kind of “fuck it” attitude where it just doesn’t affect me anymore. Where I’m just waiting for the inevitable with no remorse or pain. 

So yay, no more suicidal thoughts, instead I just smoke weed all day, and run, and skip meals and watch myself get thinner and stare at YouTube for hours so I stay numb. 

But at-least I don’t want to kill myself.",2.3738321995464844,4.401416020408167,3.6474829931972788,88.30624716553291,77.57142857142857,6.600453514739229,25.68480725623583,7.594959193182576,1.3479691609977325,764,29,156,11,18,249,111,196,0.281,0.603,0.11699999999999999,-0.993,0,0,1,0,0,2,21.0,0,0,1,0,13,15,5,0,5,2,15,10,3,3,3,36,32,18,4,3,8,0,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,9,13,1,1,4,0,0,1,11,9,0,0,3,5,20,6,17,25,3,14,1,1,3,2,4,7,3,2,6,98,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.436599160906993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3578211131357273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14961779329788302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716510524059465,0.0,0.0,0.09463932489019453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15229965434049694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713294701604021,0.23000690151833905,0.1407725734695108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17389525838954306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445157005615399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623532126428517,0.1528138532652865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169290655903808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11317991445789377,0.0,0.0,0.13771160924487194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15614857690102732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09400953816762826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1506331295566363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15641219818356267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16798958476088768,0.32103361261997737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18805840887808825,0.0,0.11650029531256638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12674182273560405,0.0,0.0,0.17310972510299638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495471768311478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Varian_Finn,2020/04/15,"In a psychiatric hospital, what specific questions do they ask you in GROUP therapy If I’m staying in a psych ward I would have one-on-one therapy but they also have group therapy questions. 
For those of you who have been, do you know/remember any of the specific questions the doctors asked the group?",3.399473684210527,6.151478684210527,4.469385964912281,79.93986842105264,77.94736842105263,9.4140350877193,32.30701754385965,9.725611199111238,3.92041754385965,243,13,43,8,6,79,36,57,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,7,1,0,0,0,6,10,3,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,0,6,8,0,4,0,0,0,0,14,3,0,4,0,30,9,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14050377079011622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194790863867485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3285034848478366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17983197202666648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655775018201054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190559389361979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5904581100125574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1990289541567886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.187268216454726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6027699619174851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12480916920281045,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,girlfund,2020/04/15,"I want to die I want to die. I want to die so fucking bad. Being in quarantine is getting into my head and my mental health is just deteriorating. I feel like I'm stuck inside my negative mindset without anywhere to go. I'm failing a class in school and the only way to pass it is to pass my final. There's no way I would be able to do that. I do so many extracurricular activities but it would be useless if I'm no longer eligible for a UC. My dream school is UC Davis but I'm afraid that my only option is now community college. I'm not shitting on it. It's just I can't go. It's not my dream school and my parents will be disappointed in me. Aside from that. I also broke up with my boyfriend a while back. It's been over 7 months but I don't know why I am still sad about it. Please help. I hate being sad so much. I hate it. I really do fucking hate it. My heart still skips a beat when he texts me. And my whole day goes sour when he doesn't. He was my first boyfriend I ever had. I know that this may just be your typical high school girl drama but honestly, it's been negatively impacting me so much to the point where I just don't just want to feel anything anymore.

 Please help. I am fucking sad.",0.1422293504410561,2.250626689922484,2.5153140871424746,92.87476744186048,86.36434108527132,5.574124565624166,19.749264902432504,6.953978226594392,0.21940267308206352,938,28,219,13,29,320,127,258,0.21100000000000002,0.677,0.11199999999999999,-0.9859,1,1,0,0,0,3,25.0,0,1,0,3,20,18,7,1,6,0,28,7,3,0,1,32,51,17,3,7,13,1,2,1,0,4,1,0,0,1,15,6,0,0,4,3,0,4,11,16,0,1,5,3,33,2,21,36,3,28,0,7,0,3,8,10,4,3,13,142,48,7,0.10394639323882196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08312589311828843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030868908638392,0.0,0.0,0.08553902482885288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07992836017271576,0.08679089651067015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.067036824368482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3236398354885844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09402546372783636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10511683932241236,0.07425932409928583,0.0,0.11386819293356802,0.0,0.08841674898790236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882902967382755,0.05430770023811801,0.0,0.11815026144638947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3078766297052252,0.10667898799820676,0.11049015526038347,0.0,0.12317697647037427,0.13934615258410224,0.10982507150982232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425243858205154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05078295720135868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053853277126185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10475351593212293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296901937678987,0.0,0.15282511851166056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15811183212399094,0.0,0.0,0.1154201684654287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22820385052035175,0.09826294005418988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659072120830774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4207971975630781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669947890984233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16602344782710646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2452411035617631,0.16501561729325812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09379545207082614,0.11605243591143585,0.0,0.10020061374653147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476810707782801,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,whereareyougavin,2020/04/15,"Am I a narcissist? I’ve been mentally ill since I was born but sometimes I wonder if I’ve become a narcissist person because I always want to feel special on the eyes of others, I want others to recognize me and notice me In a superior way...",5.096054421768706,5.307149081632655,7.637142857142859,69.39952380952383,68.38775510204081,10.61496598639456,32.65986394557823,10.504223727775694,3.678994557823129,191,8,34,5,3,70,35,49,0.04,0.722,0.23800000000000002,0.8519,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,4,0,3,2,1,0,0,7,7,3,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,7,2,5,5,0,4,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,2,1,24,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25710789248759697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18835997075553687,0.3412597711070387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15623673053604756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31139343509353645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3517918969176428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26980178033228325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25560316058066546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056031232526992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.364505520338383,0.2452651801507253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350909835761758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mowmoomow,2020/04/15,"how do i handle ptsd when my mom constantly does stuff to trigger me? i have ptsd + bipolar so it's not a good combo. my mom knows my triggers and doesnt believe my trauma, so she constantly talks about things that make me upset and harasses me about the past. this would lead to extreme rages and mental breakdowns from me. i have no friends and so loneliness also takes a part. i was just wondering how i could keep my cool and try my best to stay semi-stable when she says stuff. also, whenever i tell her to leave me alone, she doesn't. im kind of hopeless now. ive dug too deep into my mind
 so yeah, any ways i could stay connected with reality instead of going on rages and disassociating? this is too personal but i would really appreciate the help, thanks!",2.6836372180451136,4.800039638157895,4.1706015037594,84.49921052631579,76.96052631578948,7.50075187969925,24.01503759398497,8.418075326091056,1.5714327067669172,603,20,121,12,14,200,100,152,0.11699999999999999,0.742,0.142,0.8384,0,1,0,0,0,1,17.0,0,0,0,2,17,12,3,1,4,2,12,1,0,6,0,25,19,17,0,4,3,2,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,1,7,8,0,1,2,0,0,2,4,6,0,0,1,2,25,6,12,14,2,14,0,1,0,0,12,3,0,1,6,85,32,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13884026429574284,0.0,0.21440702718877094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09116180860967736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15103376704612045,0.14068216132697425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897310636190425,0.0,0.21406357645452775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731219152420128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357034649511612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07618638840441858,0.11243874151521414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0898540551114304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14480210480528993,0.0,0.0,0.11915399729368036,0.0,0.13959736516513122,0.07367296995710675,0.0,0.0,0.14194459574118926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08948256859114619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509563083200524,0.0,0.13535705557961633,0.31400654290237484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1451682015310866,0.12797040176401367,0.0,0.11705141343984768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31340559501078713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587888825634961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10660569633587767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28576899645618314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069211711727913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079246842117304,0.10774810848888974,0.11716973665110032,0.12341957816892077,0.0,0.0,0.08906000133996349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910143573711652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640639942725437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537662876143345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904572580806304,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Clam-the-Clam,2020/04/15,"How do I handle high stress caused by dumb mistakes that ultimately won’t hurt me much? I recently failed to submit a quiz on time and will receive a 20% grade penalty on the free response portion because of it. 

Here’s the thing though; I’m taking the class Pass / No pass. I only need a 50% to pass the class and 35% of my grade is just attendance and homework. By the time I get to finals (worth 25%) my grade will very likely already be over 50% (I.e. enough to skip the final and still pass)

Altogether, this mistake should be of minimal consequence in the long run, but I still couldn’t help but break down into tears after I did that. I just have these negative thoughts about myself worth that linger on for a really long time, and I have no idea how to take care of myself mentally. It seriously sucks :(",6.184088050314465,5.969887911949684,6.291194968553463,81.42408805031448,66.10691823899371,9.582389937106921,29.616352201257854,9.150863307647796,2.192703144654088,634,19,129,10,9,202,103,159,0.20199999999999999,0.727,0.071,-0.956,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,0,1,9,11,2,1,11,0,12,0,0,3,0,20,20,10,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,8,6,0,0,2,0,3,7,5,8,0,0,2,0,13,4,21,11,3,27,0,2,0,0,2,8,2,0,12,85,21,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19165225530822047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586932793507917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17707099600428694,0.17840980770644033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1794504298078119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3805001303749183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073687080035396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11640921810453983,0.1834948502796649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1859203261911128,0.19605545357734214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484775835168509,0.0,0.0,0.30738992865539955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17502133582052135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276694922878387,0.1287761818500398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13208599167832294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11125924390625602,0.0,0.17148093962194896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2773906475373797,0.0,0.19894160755209034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611606660419423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11538049237196388,0.0,0.17063264587145208,0.13787680509843192,0.303810021908227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14329824987807854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TaurusGuy813,2020/04/15,"Quarantine messing up your health? How has your health been since quarantine had been issued?
What have you done to make the most of it?

Having a hard time here and there.",2.5874999999999986,5.490152750000004,1.9112500000000023,95.60875,84.0,5.7,17.375,7.1686216300943375,0.12884999999999944,136,3,27,2,4,39,28,32,0.061,0.9390000000000001,0.0,-0.2359,0,2,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,3,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,7,2,0,2,0,4,8,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,1,3,0,3,4,1,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,1,22,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3424801113916572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2997955259765846,0.0,0.0,0.7114698627315412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34930496683517537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.223392544985905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2768396584150199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19514677770333616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pandaoin,2020/04/15,"Never bored when i am alone Just wanted to know if i am the only one who feels like this because everyone i have talked to cant really relate to this.

I am never bored when i am alone even when i am doing nothing. The only time i get bored is when i am around other people that also includes my friends (close ones too)... I dont really understand why but i tend to zone out of conversations or just want to go home because i am bored. It is also a reason why i dont go out a lot or dont like to talk to other people on the phone. Dont get me wrong i love my friends and enjoy their company when i am with them but i just get so bored sometimes and that is never the case when i am alone. Even in quarantine i always hear people complain of being bored but i have enjoyed it so far and could do this for a few more months lol. I also havent had a lot of contact with my friends and colleagues (havent replied to messages and if i do it takes up to 4 days to reply) because i am too lazy to text back and dont really want to start a conversation I would rather have in person.

In conclusion am unproductive, like to do nothing but lay in bed all day and dont like to socialize

So now i am a bit worried because it seems like i am the only one who feels this way and it is usually common or known that humans like to socialize and seek contact to others but i am somehow the complete opposite.

I apologize if there are a lot of mistakes because english is not my first language. Hope you can understand the gist of it and help me out :)",3.33264055944056,3.8884919661538495,5.0212097902097925,85.37483566433569,72.41538461538462,8.001398601398602,26.772727272727273,8.150884317080207,1.5374923076923075,1199,39,261,17,22,409,141,325,0.052000000000000005,0.7240000000000001,0.223,0.9954,0,4,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,1,2,2,25,22,0,0,14,1,41,1,0,1,4,57,61,33,0,11,16,0,2,6,3,1,0,1,2,2,18,17,0,0,9,0,0,2,13,9,0,4,1,3,35,13,34,57,7,34,0,0,0,1,25,12,0,12,25,201,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390920007754033,0.0,0.18461145032709864,0.06402883789172344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850210701465596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059170052957122785,0.0,0.23454103092883155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400982904693595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068095566496447,0.0,0.0,0.061438576010668225,0.0,0.0,0.09925319221835964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5411112732726787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164993282202284,0.0,0.0,0.07352933676532641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781679664079583,0.054973330242483735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06545391033427803,0.0,0.0,0.17835489935233706,0.0,0.12061011231027025,0.0,0.08746529031215121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08672861309354417,0.0,0.051578183325392345,0.0,0.07718745389390012,0.07642903925445085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0422898882622648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2255642623292115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19626125322921,0.06945067604850409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0614210182683196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17804651213404932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1476718316166437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15643060277647802,0.1755725776127801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004300703935814,0.06719005896183253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14788905309082953,0.07911775402578572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07005268925206809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15688233917750474,0.0,0.0,0.0761058427597488,0.0,0.05446583875842493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057857070641932025,0.12369951886338965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04487035551887245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16021601207925018,0.0,0.0,0.08474991567002399,0.0,0.13616189285307825,0.06107958922775079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388714056981881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814679411495842,0.0,0.054663305739245764,0.08413310463551038,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dissociatedjelly,2020/04/15,"Is it normal that my friend doesn't acknowledge what I say and just jumps to a different topic? So just a little context for you to understand where I'm coming from, the whole socializing thing is relatively new since my entire childhood and the majority of my teen years was spent under a rock, my mom (now deceased) was over protective which actually backfired into me falling into verbally abusive friend groups in middle and high school that took advantage of my limited understanding of friendly vs abusive gestures. I have since left that friend group as well as the entirety of my conditioning as a child. I am much less socially anxious than I used to be since I'm around friends who are a lot more accepting and I don't feel embarrassed to be myself around. 

But there is one friend who kinda makes me not want to say anything at all whenever we hang out or when we're talking on our FB Messenger group chat. Whenever I have any input to the conversation or maybe say something to start conversation, he'll just verbally butt in front of me with a completely different topic as if I don't exist. I understand that conversing on a chat is a bit different, like I totally understand if I said something when no one was there and then 5 hours later a friend talks about something happening right then for them. But it's like, if people haven't been talking for a while, I'll say something like, ""I tried mountain biking for the first time today and really enjoyed it."" and then almost immediately after as if I didn't say anything, he'll steal the conversation with starter about a completely different topic.

Usually 1 or 2 friends will acknowledge what I said which makes me feel better, and I think I should really focus on that instead of being butthurt by that one friend, but it really triggers that social anxiety I used to have from when I had abusive friends who made me feel like I was insignificant. And this doesn't just happen online, it can also happen when we're hanging out in our little group, like I'll start saying something and he just butts in, or worse yet they kinda collectively are just so focused on what one of them is about to say that when I start talking they'll just start talking, it's like they don't expect me to have something to say which makes me feel like they inherently aren't interested. I think I should definitely call him out, but I just wanted to see if it's me missing something since I still have a lot to learn about socializing. The insignificance this makes me feel about what I have to say also makes me afraid to call him out because it makes me feel like I'm over reacting and what I do have to say really isn't that significant.",11.272485380116956,7.860271662768035,10.560868421052632,65.03182894736844,58.49317738791423,14.236608187134502,42.02426900584796,12.251624239485473,4.949644912280702,2165,84,394,51,20,702,215,513,0.073,0.8029999999999999,0.124,0.9689,5,0,7,0,0,0,32.0,3,1,6,4,32,28,0,2,19,0,39,2,2,11,2,87,81,42,0,11,23,1,6,8,10,6,0,12,0,1,31,23,0,2,16,4,1,7,11,4,1,5,12,19,55,24,64,60,10,61,0,1,1,2,63,27,2,14,35,275,86,2,0.0,0.1824775575075152,0.05009742599110301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05140650722306915,0.0,0.0,0.08210822867330643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03491086428340534,0.0,0.039272601333359206,0.057996104245067376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844918177437767,0.0914014811767674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03129450838502633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04540333163352201,0.056046617709540884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10484146505431444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044222208701208604,0.10765156243963593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21454460891430474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155744927784739,0.11002531225005048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043667155756861364,0.0,0.0,0.3966277507456597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619119967281282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424027187749268,0.0,0.0,0.050556522652989336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05577771101841066,0.0,0.0,0.2006449979027544,0.10290615595256168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08728962277963451,0.0,0.04857623256522159,0.20560674621045588,0.0,0.05157483372847068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06012517725653373,0.0,0.0,0.03773854122663214,0.0,0.0,0.04958151477307295,0.0,0.0,0.050299279240630115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13914889549393078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03559055463858814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155097549957506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04384144700151386,0.0976663290600974,0.4082517726863821,0.0,0.05195570120586502,0.04090887659394928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16986571446036894,0.0,0.0,0.2093260893162318,0.0,0.2766516700310974,0.0,0.0,0.1453461376009918,0.0,0.040997728589576135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063133481892082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034105966821826615,0.06578924761522045,0.0,0.0,0.029934969405215745,0.0,0.048661395073695005,0.0,0.05703720421628635,0.03485439710428038,0.0,0.0,0.21377416623324094,0.0,0.0886772275581937,0.056540361745289223,0.0,0.06055968801047715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04615805410281497,0.0,0.0,0.057315834985079875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052316704716349915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033059291690367566
mentalhealth,Lost2TheVoid,2020/04/15,"How do you operate once things get better? Hey there,

I've been unable to find any answers on this online so I was wondering if anybody had advice or could point me in the direction of online resources. I won't get into the history of my mental health journey but suffice to say it was long. For years I spent time in counselling for things like abandonment, physical/mental/sexual abuse, and a few other things. It was during this time I accepted through the advice of counsellors that the best I could ever get to was a baseline functional.  


Coping rather than fixing I guess would be a better way of putting it.  


For the past 8 years I've been pushing improving my mental health with lots of ups and downs and then almost exactly a year ago, I made one large push with a big life change (moving and school). For the past year I've not so much focused on mental health (like coping mechanisms) as I have on getting ready for school, being a parent and partner, and just not being all over the place.  


About 2 months ago, I noticed I started to feel odd. Couldn't figure out what it was until I realized it was happiness (sustained, not just momentary) and a peace I'd never felt. And then a week ago something bigger happened and I've been unable to focus since.  


As far back as I can remember, I've never been attached to living (I've got journals from at least 10 stating the same). Not suicidal, at least not anymore , but just more akin to the feeling someone gets about taking a trip to visit family far away. And recently, well, it's starting to go away and now my mind is in a panic.  


I'm panicking about feeling good and alive and this hasn't happened. Some days it's like food I've eaten my whole life tastes better and I can focus a bit more on achieving milestones.  


Does anyone have any advice about how to deal with the anxiety of that? I now have this anxiety about having something inside me I can only describe as precocious; like I'm holding porcelain in my chest.  


I'm sorry if this is nonsense I'm just unsure what to do.  


Thanks again",4.359266666666667,5.852345060000005,5.068000000000001,82.4756666666667,70.9,7.733333333333332,27.333333333333336,8.238735603445708,1.8786333333333336,1624,56,300,24,30,524,210,400,0.085,0.758,0.157,0.9856,1,0,2,0,1,0,43.0,0,1,0,5,23,15,0,1,21,0,31,9,1,3,5,65,57,30,1,7,15,1,4,4,1,2,5,1,0,1,20,19,3,2,11,0,1,8,10,2,1,1,16,6,23,13,55,33,13,61,0,1,0,0,7,23,0,8,32,207,43,3,0.0,0.09618574662581132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23798625398521103,0.21588513451663074,0.0,0.08129065315562045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041119551307294,0.0,0.12420588699620495,0.0,0.08050935000677012,0.056763369186151325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15254370845909027,0.06242287715430188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08519404044505384,0.2153929541204428,0.08862819916945001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0858783199004533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963222073261668,0.0,0.0,0.052354776744146465,0.08369364300002642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710416977898278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07343250829838174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765298530470577,0.0,0.12314206497591815,0.0,0.07794611522632068,0.0,0.07419760569328054,0.0,0.0981639143465195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120675873476704,0.0,0.04613681076453658,0.06809044303758091,0.06492754881281633,0.0,0.08942959292873016,0.0,0.14357548844169452,0.08641826756924459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2588735727972453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11468052952196145,0.1586429793911721,0.0,0.07168396483023945,0.07184228414527691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06901685051926552,0.0,0.07681505487099356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3272438389769074,0.0,0.08196927285451204,0.0,0.06479758740175177,0.08628213967723508,0.0596770881970471,0.0,0.12522298019855302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924246611314378,0.0,0.08645469887788347,0.05501008146449532,0.06174151109812603,0.0,0.09524795303719888,0.09014145894745534,0.0,0.1549921536720487,0.0,0.0,0.084816457739393,0.0,0.07674191516714074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08160893403550276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08015605744604624,0.0,0.09196180450792632,0.0,0.0,0.06455807843471399,0.0,0.16431822017612913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715343846115664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878406635887853,0.12499359749387005,0.0,0.09087504514926964,0.11492010542518526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879840983432008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06103771473394176,0.0,0.0,0.07474019758479827,0.0,0.0,0.1617983677097219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09467413160688253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06443738858510069,0.0651181876061308,0.0,0.07299111667182967,0.0,0.0,0.09063525055065456,0.0,0.0,0.08803690726417927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05766837527560845,0.0,0.0,0.20911060171511944
mentalhealth,bharathk98,2020/04/15,"Have you had so many abusive psychologists? I had three psychologists and two therapists, all of whom were extremely unprofessional. They named called, yelled and they mocked me. How are they qualified!

My first psychologist was respectful but over the years became more condescending. He immediately supports people I conflicted with and downplayed my problems. He had patients with all kinds of issues but solution to my mine was, “so EASY...it’s Soo EASY...just work (...or twerk?... I’m not sure what said)“. Then, some time later, when my mom was laughing at my response to his remark, he said, “You didn’t have to say it SO Stupidly”. Another time, in response to when I punched my mom in the shoulder (she refused to call the cops on a guy in prison uniform who talked about doing shit to his family (this was in my college campus, not joking, my campus is near the Cleveland Clinic close to the poor neighborhood)) he said, “I wouldn’t punch your mom” he smiled, then he said, “Or you”. At times when I talked he would puckers his lips, when I said why, he said, “He just does that”. 

Once I had a problem with my relatives and with people being disrespectful wherever I go, and I said, “we have to figure out what is behind this”, and immediately he says, “No, YOU have to figure this out”. At times, I hear him whisper “Cunt”, “Bitch” and “Fag”. This was before I repeated this in my head whenever people breathed while they talked. All these years I tried to ignore it, then one day I snapped. I wrote a profanity fueled text calling him a bitch for nearly failing college, for how he was depressed about his ex-girlfriend, how he was as sensitive as I was and how he would like it if someone called him sexual insults. He thought I was a “threat” and sent me to the hospital (This was my second time I was sent during college). I was finished with that punk.   

My college psychologist was a rough headed dike. She puckered her lips like my psychologist. She would immediately sides with the college, without hearing me out. She tried to downplay my problems, saying “I was beating myself up”. I tried to tell her my Professor changed my grade from a D to a B but she assumed it wasn’t true. (The professor called me a cunt and joked about being married to me, so I wanted him in trouble) She said, “Bharath I got a C in Geometry, I’m not taking half the challenging courses you’re taking”. She kept treating me like I was emotional and beating myself up when all I was doing was stating the facts. Then she calls me a “Cunt”. (Not all my psychologists did this, just her and my first one)

I went to a therapist. She was sorry I couldn’t get along with the psychologists but didn’t understand why students were bullying me. I tried explaining that my voice was annoying, I couldn’t articulate/summarize well, I didn’t use the right words or I tend to interrupt conversations when I’m nervous. But after more times with her, she assumed it was because my voice was loud, I appeared rude and I was an A-hole. (I’ve never been insulted for this before) (She didn’t actually say that but you get the point). Another time when I was arguing about how my parents would not let me my bike outside. (I wanted to go out and feel the breeze). She said put a fan over the treadmill. I said “That’s not....”, and she interrupts “Oh REALLY”. Then she started assuming that the insults were “locker room talk” and that I should go back to my old psychologist. When I said no, she offered me a social skills therapist but said I had to find my own psycologist. 

When my social skills therapist heard about how I was kicked out of college, she started yelling. When I stared in disbelief she looked at my mom and said, “Is this how he is at home” as though I committed a crime. She continued to scold me about how, “She is the boss”, “Your displaying POOR social skills” and “La La La La” when I fought back. When I said “Why are you doing this”, she said, “I’m not pussy footing, I’m not gonna lose you like the other psychologists”. (BITCH do you seriously think that. One more time and I’m leaving. (I didn’t actually say that but I was losing patience))

After that, she occasionally yelled but I tolerated it. (One time I called her an A-hole but that was it) She complimented me on how nice I dressed and how handsome I looked. She even thought I would date a girl. She doesn’t understand how the new generation and uses outdated/“pop-psychology” (stress balls, behaving “normal”, etc.), fortunately she never sweared at me. She didn’t call me an idiot, or a punk but she thought I had poor social skills/ I’m an A-hole.

THEN, I was kicked out of college the third time. When I told her it was because I stated to the Dean, “If you treated me like you treated other students, they would bring a gun and shoot up the whole school”. She flipped out. Again she ranted on and on. (Yes I was wrong but should I be kicked out of college over that? No, I should be given a warning, or “educated” on its implication but those pussies thought it was a threat.) I fired back at her, countering her over and over. But despite her weakening she wouldn’t stop. What did she want? Does she want me to go crazy. I decided to leave but before I left the BITCH wanted to talk to my mom (My mom was stupid to think the therapist was yelling at me for my own good). She told my mom she was trying to toughen me up for the real world. How much more do I need? Why is everyone trying to toughen me up. Get off my dick!!

We got a new psychiatrist. He’s a nice guy. Somehow all my psychiatrists are great, (maybe  they don’t hear me talk all day. He recommended I see another psychologist). We found a women and she was similar to the others. Her intentions were against me but unlike the others she was less explicit. One time I was telling her my dreams in life. When I said one of them was modernizing Indian Music, she said, “That sounds like a PITIFUL idea.” (I should have slapped her). One day I could go to her appointment and she kept replacing me with other people. Then my mom tried responding to her but she didn’t respond back. What a bitch!

My mom’s psychologist gave me to her colleague/teacher. Overall he was generous but what he didn’t understand was my impulse. Like the first therapist he thought people had a problem cause my voice sounds loud. One time I responded to his veteran patients (he was talking about my cat) and I blurted “YEAH” (though I meant to say it softly). When I closed his door and left, I could hear him telling the veteran, “YEAH, HUG me”. Apparently with him and my mom psychologist hugging is fucking. But a sin is a sin. DON’T SAY IT if people know what you mean.  

Why is this happening to me. Why is everyone stabbing me in the back. Am I alone?",3.4230208311626966,5.399529003084044,4.3970964179291085,84.34929331027251,74.31225905936776,7.8195947682455005,27.18198614960373,8.605353355243054,1.978286064167483,5235,201,1044,102,111,1696,437,1297,0.16899999999999998,0.746,0.085,-0.9991,2,1,0,2,2,0,213.0,3,13,7,14,51,68,23,2,62,3,111,14,9,17,14,186,199,100,0,30,38,11,4,7,0,13,2,41,3,4,51,53,0,6,24,5,3,11,30,40,1,16,101,49,229,28,118,76,18,131,2,5,4,4,197,53,11,14,72,726,280,22,0.0,0.03719061010535848,0.06126190626725475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032509343405203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09874172031990977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12068029657927233,0.0,0.03826865754946725,0.0,0.08012870269013514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2564118965401425,0.0,0.0,0.032244956909383636,0.03320520164329563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05012282534036887,0.0,0.0,0.06072956204060294,0.0,0.027035138233189523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05493712273197022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03530818927181042,0.0,0.0,0.035006823223096416,0.0207320146377326,0.0,0.0,0.059986711011037565,0.0,0.0,0.029590578915667864,0.0,0.015871126740862062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028688805991442263,0.08009792369600609,0.0,0.034416212790752534,0.0,0.029018451386652037,0.049198077056345164,0.0,0.08919492756674917,0.02632744671373426,0.05020900159745918,0.0346062766209074,0.0,0.06215971868338506,0.027757023252593712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06442795464629034,0.0,0.14150989193972574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031485538249779274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03543414868118181,0.0,0.03276176520644373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03268661800403909,0.017250470475301632,0.0,0.0,0.0664724405541848,0.06820807330138562,0.032097187463788895,0.022170846563781845,0.10734491802640868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052717394092888274,0.07023210453606016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031823329231278244,0.03153428112438292,0.03419161878528748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3676219786268052,0.0,0.0,0.023074388848834792,0.023274406760988797,0.048417974556176885,0.06063102146517337,0.0,0.0,0.030754371798435282,0.0,0.0,0.03293727857824732,0.03342806091896276,0.17015897372561847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034853561693343166,0.0,0.0,0.1305663023079875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029672573596821662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12013941773827927,0.0,0.03155442623568346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035727340538897166,0.020108477059909556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0268058743906777,0.5075851275071257,0.1747315050212039,0.0,0.03176715404388702,0.025012819659060832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03222016498741856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279877659309223,0.02659563899177228,0.0,0.0,0.035137205781655766,0.04443432612486317,0.0,0.0,0.02624245276877357,0.03595577869550664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035619652478960644,0.029583584333348525,0.0,0.04720096126556371,0.1766039696428072,0.08230561699394466,0.0,0.0,0.21866898380330044,0.0,0.040225367282468935,0.061678697871949725,0.12459605490180505,0.21963682806471727,0.0,0.0,0.059986711011037565,0.0,0.1491766030203143,0.0,0.030662308863948905,0.09803058247294344,0.0,0.05421971184382672,0.0,0.0,0.09256967441627928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028222312104694874,0.02909774368160671,0.16994112651731566,0.03504448822489388,0.0,0.03025769516158376,0.0,0.02285142935705533,0.0,0.0,0.13378627097182288,0.03431873899760002,0.0,0.040426732286740805
mentalhealth,eid-a,2020/04/15,"I looking some one with knowledge about aphasia to help me build an application to help those who have it. Hello, 

My dad recently had aphasia and I've been learning about it, I would like to create an app specifically for him to help him out with words and stuff, but I don't mind publishing it to help other as well..

if you are interested please let me know.

thanks.",3.6062499999999993,5.4979871250000025,4.331666666666667,85.38000000000002,73.58333333333334,7.5777777777777775,25.88888888888889,8.344100000000001,1.5969555555555557,291,10,59,5,6,93,53,72,0.0,0.718,0.282,0.9625,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,0,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,14,10,5,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,1,9,4,12,6,1,2,0,0,1,0,10,1,0,2,2,44,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6578632591396053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484850535229487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509066498621782,0.0,0.11987500592479365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20604834545446166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477529634603532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16626853244403214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693417185682916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24227250138968534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28088905074495596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22590300970599397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22061639480227213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17430325260826432,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,luunien_,2020/04/15,"Repeated Dreams Every other week or so, I keep on having a dream about a person that I would rather die than see again grab my arm. I rip my arm out of her grip and she starts chasing me and I sprint with all the energy I have. She never catches me but it bugs me as these dreams have been showing up for about 1-2 years. 

This person was a close person in my life once, but betrayed my trust and led me down a path where my light would’ve been extinguished. As soon as I stopped seeing her, I started to have these dreams of an almost “cat and mouse scenario.” My mental health has definitely gotten better and I don’t think of her every second of the day now, but she keeps popping up, no matter how hard I try to erase her from my mind. 

Any tips or answers to what I’m going through? I just want answers because I’m tired of seeing her chasing me down.",4.364437596302004,4.517843101694917,4.952121212121213,88.21798151001543,69.96045197740114,7.340318438623522,25.130457113507962,6.574015621080383,0.7463039548022596,667,16,145,4,11,214,113,177,0.099,0.759,0.141,0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,10,2,0,0,7,0,10,5,2,2,2,30,23,15,1,3,7,0,3,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,7,8,0,3,3,5,0,3,3,0,0,1,4,7,30,2,25,18,1,23,0,0,3,0,11,9,0,3,11,101,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16346239871644788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100955745285312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09951026987830013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.144373502489259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10527701597475207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16941850717507545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27507536349679673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277368878142114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623197716231856,0.0,0.0,0.1735176740542196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29019241083608266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153020286713992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16450865138806506,0.0,0.1648269935313609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12590161305809658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17384646217361502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4276075410314665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39024610646030544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310858058624056,0.0,0.0,0.1364768834084987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459831649589584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18762165044988247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083000313089802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09628384033908778,0.0,0.13094217764234872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319236120439388,0.0,0.0,0.10512192738800087
mentalhealth,smokesom95,2020/04/15,"Idk how to handle panic attacks. Any advice? So I have anxiety which I live with on a day to day basis but ever since this COVID19 I have been having 
Stronger almost panic attacks I feel my chest tighten and my heart pounds I get sharp pains like in my toes and shins. They last for about 20-35 mins even while trying deep breath and get rid it... I cant call my significant other every time I have a panic attack. What should I do....",0.6606818181818177,3.084759159090911,2.145909090909093,93.92636363636365,88.0909090909091,4.1090909090909085,15.954545454545453,5.565023196281405,-0.6670590909090911,338,7,70,2,11,109,67,88,0.293,0.64,0.067,-0.9667,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,5,8,3,3,2,0,8,5,4,1,1,10,11,7,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,1,2,13,1,7,9,0,10,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,8,44,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569478642968618,0.0,0.0,0.1608293864005828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092214426677574,0.0,0.1228674873278382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5481568811199592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640024717187627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071624791298262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060824927447284,0.14528244998690712,0.1353222584291355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812100857904035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16782593631415385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190325601322162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13091994695545564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846674876445632,0.0,0.14182304644960594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709021399980564,0.5653295642818347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1328596324810116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365395591787162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904478056287968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oomarvs,2020/04/15,"I'm not feel that I belong in nothing. Any advice? Since I was 15 I'm never felt that I belong in nothing. I'm not feel that I belong in my city (neighborhood) or with my friends. I'm felt the same when I was in university and I feel the same today in my work. 

It's like all people around me rejects me. It's weird and sad obviously.",-0.7281430745814319,1.3322924109589067,2.282922374429224,93.14194824961949,90.64383561643835,4.888280060882801,17.700152207001523,6.42735559955562,-0.16758934550989313,258,7,60,3,9,91,39,73,0.115,0.805,0.08,-0.34,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,2,0,2,0,0,0,3,17,11,4,0,0,3,0,5,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,5,11,2,7,7,3,9,0,2,0,0,1,6,0,1,4,37,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450258319123193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17051569941538894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2232168668746969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3803537356741651,0.0,0.4815104588901904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19372553419737826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12250170131082375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19339057015198685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4811945940883636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17383552201728827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074194645595811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23767763949241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825458827081397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,alessiaryan00,2020/04/15,"I am going insane over the coronavirus. I feel like everything in my house has germs on it. My mom has just recently gone through chemo and I live with her and am terrified i will give it to her. Everything i touch i feel has germs, even if it has been sanitized. When my dog goes outside, i’m scared to have her sit on my lap incase she got something on her paws when she was out. I know it is illogical, but i can’t stop. How do i stop myself from this? I have started to have hair loss which happens when i am stressed.",2.126014271151888,3.603362376146791,3.4232415902140687,92.09084607543323,76.61467889908258,7.413251783893987,24.037716615698265,8.167268648758528,1.1195190621814477,405,13,94,7,9,132,70,109,0.16699999999999998,0.8170000000000001,0.016,-0.9349,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,2,1,0,16,1,1,1,0,13,26,8,0,1,3,1,4,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,2,3,0,0,2,1,3,0,0,4,4,22,1,12,21,0,16,0,1,0,0,8,6,0,1,8,67,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15125835605481974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4116372395112918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315877720046832,0.16360415257520527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2196864040126412,0.13015115364254567,0.0,0.1831595041169643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20251199796673053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26424576338044564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585741669878056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188228251421838,0.0,0.2022192380817688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682126995777199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261188663707989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22927806815654206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17630239977774714,0.0,0.0,0.16209382540706127,0.0,0.0,0.3829237374188025,0.26232915957211833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reimigi,2020/04/15,"[TW: SUICIDE] Does anyone else get very suicidal when they’re hungry? I know people get moody whenever theyre hungry, but for some odd reason, I tend to get extremely suicidal whenever I am hungry. I can even go into a mental breakdown and experience delusions (basically thinking that God has deceived us all and we are all sinners, even though I am agnostic/atheist), and it also triggers my POCD. In a nutshell, I become a maniac.
Just as a background, I have ADHD which causes me to forget to eat and also not have the ability to prepare food (executive dysfunction). This means I usually go about 10-12 hours without eating another meal, but often I go entire days without eating. I also have MDD. By any chance, has anyone else experienced this??",6.602570965125707,7.749166613138692,7.9174695863747,65.41072181670724,65.35036496350365,10.46845093268451,34.930251419302515,10.504223727775694,4.220593511759935,594,27,89,15,9,204,96,137,0.195,0.769,0.036000000000000004,-0.9734,0,0,0,0,0,1,26.0,2,0,0,0,10,2,1,0,5,0,9,5,0,3,2,23,19,12,3,0,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,6,5,0,4,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,0,1,14,0,12,19,3,9,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,4,64,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14984023150064313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2991178572337185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847861664809748,0.13073706622399114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17435726322764872,0.25549725423021746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1376984377747278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12807993581215182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.080407802786229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091076532213848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38273400160435456,0.20830703233924736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1646989395284101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196023207886493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15076264586271412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19541928895008828,0.0,0.2125742756541424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278394804430795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06852045600231772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358122559022174,0.0,0.0,0.12564736067948934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643689443609548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12819103588323644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4091365947704309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988943005936451,0.12249673160700512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14997378825139018,0.0,0.13731658101943214,0.10287343998810584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403726985903659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,F_r_I_e_N_dS,2020/04/15,"Why is it emotionally difficult and draining to write journal entries every single day? I find it hard to write a journal entry almost every day because I feel emotionally drained after having to write one. Maybe it's the fear of feeling vulnerable even when it's just by myself or something else entirely, but I sure hell don't understand shit like this often. If anyone knows what I'm talking about, please let me know. Thank you and I appreciate it",6.092142857142857,7.705169642857142,6.727142857142859,71.76785714285714,66.85714285714286,8.933333333333335,33.04761904761905,9.2995712137729,3.2519904761904765,366,16,59,7,6,120,66,84,0.18100000000000002,0.633,0.18600000000000005,0.3701,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,5,7,2,1,2,0,4,1,1,0,1,18,11,6,0,1,4,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,6,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,0,3,7,3,7,10,1,4,1,0,0,0,5,0,2,4,5,38,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19067162819288766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331415556929763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607431023034395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456019268628878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15906605686522698,0.42837914655460707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12576632956876255,0.0,0.32086319450545986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21426814034328456,0.19255758701674947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17403450134012755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17057310671043566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20929257411042115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19471071805314505,0.0,0.0930264243417329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912959672228408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12902912441580636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20901685727702807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19545673487961449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14658962514557455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17946248264370826,0.0,0.0,0.15304716909266747,0.0,0.17530717999854464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982271824284599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17181857864377967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,honeybloom-,2020/04/15,"How can I stop closing off and becoming distant when I’m feeling hurt/upset/down? I know this is something I should speak to a therapist about, but with the whole Covid-19 situation, this is impossible at the moment.

I have a massive issue with closing off when I should speak up. For example, someone may say something to hurt me and I would distance myself and make the situation worse, rather than openly discuss/resolve it with the person. Each time I do this, I have massive regret after, just wishing I had spoken up and not run away. I don’t know how to deal with this, the more I hold onto what I’m feeling, the more I drown in it and I start to feel depressed. I have a history of abuse and I have low self worth sometimes which I believe may tie into this. 

Are there any exercises or approaches I can take to practice this skill? It’s very difficult for me, and is affecting some of my relationships.

Thank you very much.",3.755598526703501,5.656439845303872,4.697215469613262,82.87794106813998,73.19889502762429,7.478600368324125,29.19373848987109,8.238735603445708,2.1175190423572747,736,31,140,12,15,239,109,181,0.195,0.747,0.057999999999999996,-0.9842,0,0,2,0,1,0,23.0,0,1,0,1,8,6,0,0,9,0,18,1,0,4,0,40,30,13,1,6,5,0,3,0,0,5,1,3,0,2,11,16,0,2,5,1,1,2,2,5,0,0,1,6,22,1,25,24,6,22,0,4,0,0,8,13,0,4,7,108,33,0,0.0,0.18480616261584384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10606909063137178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14654467205616872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17226333825817275,0.0,0.17573164211566356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16080450109044211,0.13434197875513668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365985947307022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3339512631047405,0.0,0.0,0.16279851530189826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17144076113981654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10411525201809856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146603738357218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13619230651555314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16745994947455886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403844810589182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1627170801929302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506473231935741,0.0,0.0,0.13215803587146796,0.2401560305421878,0.1542643424475648,0.0,0.1104006801218588,0.0,0.0,0.13040299635003322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172746090821872,0.0,0.0,0.1436018286839391,0.0,0.1811002636835453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095091307717837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573932206761079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1741417355437691,0.17936480716987585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589529622940617,0.11080093998163848,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,D7578,2020/04/15,"Im trying to figure out whats been going on with me since Late November, Anyone have any suggestions? I feel hopeless right now like it wont ever end!!😩 I would say it started about 3 weeks after I quit smoking towards the end of November, It started with this thought of “am I going crazy” “I’m not feeling normal” “am I losing my mind” it was like it was on repeat nonstop in my head and I just labeled it off as nicotine withdrawal, but I started getting concerned mid December when the thought and a couple other thoughts were still persistent and sticking in my head even though I didn’t want them too, I started getting worried and went into a spree of research online and reddit about anxiety and this kind of similar thing and I found stories about all kinds of intrusive thoughts that get stuck in people’s heads, and one thing I read about was people who get the thought of them all the sudden being GAY or That their sexuality changes to something they don’t want. I remember in my head I was like “dang that would suck to have that thought on blast in my head” and what do you know, a few days later my thoughts started being like “what if you were gay” “oh you looked at that guy, that means you’re gay” all these thoughts are super distressing and the only time they aren’t on blast in my head is when I’m sleeping, I went and saw a physciatrist and he told me all the thoughts I’ve been having are intrusive thoughts related to anxiety, he prescribed me with fluvoxamine 100mg and after taking that for a month and a half I felt a bit better but the intrusive sexuality thoughts are still there. Recently I’ve moved up to 200mg after telling my physciatrist I’m feeling a bit better but still having the intrusive thoughts. I’m on my 2nd day at 200mg but I just wanna know when these thoughts will be gone, I feel so out of wack and not myself one bit because these thoughts cause fear and discomfort, I feel like my libido has dropped and like I can’t talk to women the same while I’m having these intrusive thoughts. Anyone know what’s going on? I’ve only ever been attracted to and had sex with women and I’ve only watched straight porn. I just wanna be back to my old self and it’s like my mind is telling me that I’ll never be the old me again, and it’s really sad to me. Any advice is appreciated!

It just makes me stuck in this mindset that I'll never be better and I'll always be stuck in this frame of mind and thoughts, and I can't get back to my old self!! Is this anxiety? Or what am I going through?!😩

Background: 20 year old male who has never experienced anxiety or anything like this before. Before this onset of intrusive thoughts started I was a daily weed smoker but I’ve quit smoking weed since these thoughts started because whenever I smoke the thoughts are even more distressing and my high isn’t enjoyable like it used to be.",5.324058182525782,5.832607387040284,5.722978692352598,82.28203176688075,67.9492119089317,8.726230784199261,31.62293247713563,8.680891452615391,2.384963767269897,2282,90,452,34,36,732,231,571,0.087,0.804,0.11,0.9538,1,0,3,0,0,1,32.0,0,3,5,8,26,25,1,4,20,0,48,12,7,3,9,102,114,41,0,8,15,0,6,9,0,4,0,1,0,6,41,32,0,0,32,1,0,8,12,8,0,3,41,11,54,17,57,61,10,77,0,3,3,5,24,26,2,4,51,292,95,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044315795862791496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037735088980494484,0.0,0.0,0.06167952878860172,0.0,0.13877144517992582,0.0,0.0,0.06341997924369372,0.0,0.037319439176744885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974317469554503,0.0,0.0552902533489236,0.0,0.07717954336445969,0.0,0.0,0.12032598553795032,0.1485323712894704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04658725837038842,0.047974612357037545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05017925294220156,0.0,0.05849439351517665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08033382395357429,0.0,0.0,0.05990690111207131,0.08204389941730128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05103170434815952,0.11465239109848994,0.032398268913801084,0.04354340731227997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049724271671966816,0.0,0.0,0.11846832015681975,0.0,0.10309449995688404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0449039346318803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27925499585725155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04791509003630801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04898611451550277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09445073364419433,0.07477002936943877,0.0,0.05115712245570492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994028266811472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0380828367381732,0.05073539420617737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030271682570093987,0.0,0.0,0.04939978003160129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13737264870604549,0.0,0.03619818297416287,0.04820020011045037,0.0,0.0,0.10493085927010884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04443367280716514,0.0,0.0,0.19035007693816747,0.0,0.06146108440517568,0.10347285780755099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06288038650697565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647126913112944,0.04536258018143168,0.0,0.029052568401864293,0.0,0.04477795779540168,0.0,0.051373058159911035,0.03872891502358504,0.0,0.03606438494617407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09462052302340224,0.0,0.0,0.07502848640612869,0.0,0.04538305919398389,0.0,0.0,0.0349128825169782,0.0,0.0,0.2246942686661616,0.0,0.10865044303744373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03409778750812332,0.036450859525577466,0.0792763357281312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602574586917317,0.0,0.04455644710248388,0.6840584947353027,0.0264441291430957,0.0,0.0,0.04333416249422505,0.0,0.03078988208585705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039168105132453834,0.0,0.0,0.053497572986849706,0.0,0.036377281383918665,0.0,0.0,0.08408037924813347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04605543887045184,0.0,0.06443111491502014,0.0,0.0,0.029204111318952262
mentalhealth,Lloydrtb,2020/04/15,"It all feels so hard. I'm sorry if this isnt formatted well or anything like that. My problems started about 6-7 months ago when I started smoking pot excessively. I've tried cutting it out but by the end of my first summer smoking I was heavily addicted. Every time I try to quit nowadays I always convince myself that smoking isnt that bad and give in and then feel like I want to die for two hours. I've stolen weed from my best friend and my dad, at least an ounce and I didn't even feel bad about it. And even without the pot problems my life is still a failure. I barely do any work and I dont even know why even the work on subjects I like. The only thing that I feel is positive in my life is the fact that I've lost around 70 pounds but that's because of pot. I have ADD and Aspergers and this is the first time I really have ever talked about this in any extent. The only reason I'm even posting this is because I had a breakdown in my room and I'm scared of telling other people. I'm sorry if this is a text dump but I just dont know what to do.",2.401277089783285,3.3720588026315776,3.8730443756449935,91.18258513931886,75.00877192982456,6.592776057791537,24.376676986584112,6.794906146795322,0.6730172342621263,829,25,189,7,17,275,120,228,0.15,0.708,0.141,0.2101,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,7,15,15,2,1,11,0,17,3,0,1,3,33,32,18,1,5,8,1,5,3,1,0,3,0,1,0,17,12,0,0,7,0,0,0,6,8,1,3,4,5,22,7,21,28,4,25,0,1,0,0,5,9,0,3,18,121,39,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282542559390378,0.0,0.0,0.09987393300980517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09374931698615364,0.0,0.0,0.15323704944615812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0927166737286514,0.1002989583474313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18814718195577695,0.13736348919522426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11823876489636398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693223879442682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640935655097941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09979095491766886,0.0,0.0,0.3720828023565016,0.10191521659361263,0.09492817115202183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22787455700700865,0.08049048416906063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1916717401083645,0.0,0.0,0.08704749581582487,0.0,0.0,0.10808200614717904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009289525568492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109558946852612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12383945330110585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15916235569415313,0.16513258889384452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12299110738492805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899310170362056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17137912410166492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781102343484797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790539284514454,0.0,0.0,0.215617304958773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983694532303545,0.0,0.0,0.07217840259436417,0.11584210561401885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128009431593353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25224659007177724,0.15949485734272076,0.0,0.08997730494525931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09055876841439314,0.09847733937395788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07485202431338199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1313959559888853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529891935394864,0.0,0.11006086970490843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645487083025743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10130261974427347,0.0,0.10166590447204624,0.0,0.0,0.10860852845512113,0.0,0.16404819351323172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kanoa1301,2020/04/16,"Is it ok to have violent thoughts? When someone wrongs me, I wish them pain and sadness. Like I literally imagine myself torturing them in the most brutal ways. For some people, I couldn’t care less if they died. In fact, I think I’d celebrate their deaths. I only have these thoughts on people that I really don’t like or I have conflict with. Everyone else that I’ve talked to said that it isn’t normal to have these thoughts. Am I ok?",2.080919540229885,4.4550934137931035,3.0995402298850583,90.05781609195402,80.3793103448276,6.625287356321839,23.459770114942533,7.793537801064563,1.196094252873563,345,12,71,6,9,110,59,87,0.23600000000000002,0.578,0.18600000000000005,-0.8026,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,4,0,1,11,3,0,1,2,9,1,0,0,1,16,16,4,2,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,7,2,0,1,5,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,4,1,14,5,8,11,3,5,0,1,0,0,6,3,0,4,3,46,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215122697537196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254828210739809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18149385151003128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20760238398808603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122856928589463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21286984386379654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16523693026851147,0.2311812313612648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30124311613683746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13918308590843867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2066651503922491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18408470693992532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17462632021406144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13921220223426395,0.0,0.5174433656487502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17245182527844596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24983965405868486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23754101237708214,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,myshlongishuge,2020/04/16,":)  ive stuggled with trust issues a while and ive been to CAHMS (UK) they haven't helped discharged me, i dont like therapy and i dont understand why i cant just trust someone like everyone else does if anyone could help id appreciate it.",2.6237999999999992,4.058050379999997,4.3889999999999985,85.85950000000003,75.2,8.200000000000001,26.5,8.841846274778883,1.8974,189,7,41,4,4,64,38,50,0.081,0.632,0.287,0.8952,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,8,0,0,0,0,7,9,4,0,2,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,7,4,2,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,22,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17078491046514716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19501332927062656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21374435961577595,0.0,0.572517126093817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2040390931169276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23339083834198115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3274305461203699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25493299159836025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386559097857043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20695178568427572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793205586998777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2542723151055148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203971586271224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SavannahInChicago,2020/04/16,"Moving past it all. After suffering from depression and anxiety, being a a lot of bad relationships including one that was codependent, and going through therapy, I have done friends who give a shit about me. 

We have been friends for a couple years now and though shit hit the fan a couple times, they are still very supportive, patient with me and forgiving. I am at the point where I am starting to believe that they are *real* friend. 

Now it is getting to the point that to really move past my insecurities I have to confront my own bad habits. Though this that part of me that feels like I am going to just be abandoned is still trying to make it to the surface. I am trying to keep in mind that it will be hard, but at the other end I will be a better person. I will have my friends through this and it will all be okay.",7.4530214723926385,6.0861000306748485,7.413918711656443,78.19854677914113,64.03067484662577,10.849386503067484,33.87193251533742,9.827888789773867,2.9399822085889573,647,22,132,11,8,208,91,163,0.12300000000000001,0.74,0.13699999999999998,0.6538,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,0,2,1,9,18,3,1,11,1,24,2,2,1,2,19,34,8,0,0,2,0,2,1,4,4,0,0,0,1,15,7,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,9,0,1,3,2,17,9,20,21,5,22,0,3,0,0,12,7,2,1,12,107,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584145924057184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20921281434190306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14115149132705718,0.0,0.11080298758931624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2772474016882571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790641014231538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282084172142328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11096390765554294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0633470521492534,0.08950248707264526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3871745809155783,0.0,0.06545540640806878,0.12018325467710195,0.14240288847224813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112229319586418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135764368803204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061207141669486514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065114677882689,0.0,0.0,0.08362764335050339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12650052124349087,0.0,0.0,0.2663128575642382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08489527522412935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13566971505863662,0.2391943657102497,0.0,0.10939263379380064,0.0,0.0,0.2368666192049229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425999389472914,0.08025975507312766,0.0,0.0,0.13450748721923406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2572032225614612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867623641999063,0.0,0.20010297256455226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14217011935980814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327248818514385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2461806117730127,0.0,0.0730537589238005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701184116157381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337192698624596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067840299575907
mentalhealth,cevaceva12345678,2020/04/16,"My fear of spiders is too huge I saw a spider when i was searching on google images for a photoshop (almost two days ago). Not only that i had trouble sleeping at night, but i cant do daily activities (instead of videogames) beacuse of fear. After i saw it i had some type of panic attack for 10 min, after that i played a game, then the panic attack came again (this kind of pattern was reapeted and still is, I am curently shaking while writing this) people say that the best way to get rid of a fear is to face it, but I dont think i would be able to, if im thinking about something spiders come in the thought (if i have a made up story in my mind where i talk to a person they would turn in a spider). I dont have any idea if this is relevant but i have been abused. What should i do?",6.155284431137723,4.188723952095813,6.894962574850299,82.80974925149705,66.96407185628742,9.068562874251496,32.252245508982035,6.6274283507984215,1.7951203592814369,608,19,135,3,8,203,102,167,0.207,0.732,0.06,-0.9792,1,0,1,0,1,0,19.0,0,0,1,1,7,12,2,6,10,0,22,2,2,1,0,22,32,10,0,6,7,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,9,3,0,0,4,2,0,3,4,9,0,1,10,3,18,3,21,18,2,23,0,0,2,0,6,8,0,5,11,99,27,1,0.13511010693741926,0.16008338335265848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1197669577226529,0.0,0.1352932554833139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187950584042938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30741450353930433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1417897215996415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15452996859322596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638539366012655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08713484159436763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31669607816617096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4561092994507699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058945441078579,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15252286507360727,0.14594210050316805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069638507190232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278444500099033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13642269244481034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679168275111632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10275732462050076,0.0,0.31704519878454096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09366833620142352,0.11797293393798827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107444979959245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13520768184081078,0.0,0.0,0.10401436120302254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078991059290631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10859638607640827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17314620203698033,0.0,0.10726233296291487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14696099850403055,0.13198294221147835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724411402910276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19195668693999351,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hubertowskyyy,2020/04/16,"I fell wierd becuse i got banned So, a while a go i got banned from a game, doesnt matter what game, you just need to know that i love it. And the problem is, i now have thos weird felling in my bellu, something like guilt, thingy?
I dont exacly know what it is, and how to get it away.
Can i get some advice please?
Also, not sure if i should be posting it here, if not, where?",1.7160162601626006,2.3986350731707304,2.979024390243904,98.04626016260164,76.3170731707317,5.954471544715448,18.54471544715447,5.46131890053228,-0.6323723577235776,284,4,73,1,6,92,58,82,0.191,0.7020000000000001,0.107,-0.6219,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,0,7,6,0,1,4,0,8,1,0,1,1,18,17,8,0,5,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,2,0,2,2,2,0,3,4,3,0,0,2,0,10,3,5,13,1,9,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,3,3,49,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510226666875989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20542889214360632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24134962319838035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3010644496803071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2684210725750181,0.0,0.14599227993178274,0.0,0.4109049032427362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823518761983985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549984422791235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318465417067543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19047516488836436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819799128569427,0.0,0.0,0.246022485642544,0.0,0.0,0.24580191923137376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977607464908714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421087747477348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,reneekellen,2020/04/16,"This pandemic is making me a danger to myself I know how this sounds, selfish, I mean people are dying and getting sick and I know that but I just need to vent about all of this. I have a number of diagnosed mental issues that I am medicated for, extremely severe ADHD, extreme anxiety/panic disorder, pretty bad depression, and a sprinkle of PTSD to top it off. I’m not here to make you feel bad about me, I’m here to talk because I have no where else to go. I’m terrified, being alone isn’t good for me, I’ve started having suicidal thoughts again, I’m having multiple panic attacks a day, I’m cutting everyone off, my episodes are getting worse and occurring more than usual. I’m scared that I’m going to become a danger to my life. I’ve attempted 3 times, each time ended in a hospitalization. But I was getting better, I was taking my meds everyday, going outside, trusting people, using my coping skills, I was getting better. Than the virus hit. I’m alone all the time, I don’t have enough money to get all of my meds, I’m to anxious to even order groceries. I don’t know what to do. My therapist office is closed and don’t have a way to do it online. I’m on my last week of meds and if it’s this bad with my meds I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it without them. Anyway I’m so sorry if his was long or unimportant I just needed to let it out and also ask for help. Please help me.",2.561209895052474,3.9324728931034514,4.748770614692654,83.47372563718143,75.24137931034483,7.388305847076461,24.677661169415288,8.04050195162591,1.4408635682158917,1089,35,221,17,23,379,151,290,0.251,0.649,0.1,-0.9945,1,2,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,1,5,13,15,4,2,9,0,25,4,0,5,3,38,61,16,2,5,10,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,13,11,0,0,7,0,1,3,8,11,0,0,5,2,30,4,34,52,6,25,0,1,0,0,7,8,0,4,12,143,43,0,0.09784903887227454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759552977443315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20268418909112024,0.0,0.07824984103427393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105415623040733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914756426962616,0.11131740766311073,0.0,0.0,0.2450995809037953,0.05964786589459505,0.10806657582587513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17307904652945175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0631045352236002,0.0,0.08427723380108887,0.09931471474927148,0.10155185397849124,0.0,0.11214347579079692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08174031626335493,0.0,0.0866652053074033,0.10110421385188706,0.0,0.06462836733887316,0.0,0.0,0.0934989498708979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049475414088479885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25561042120308913,0.0,0.16682959116929796,0.08207113138985876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13117229637373656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10212897460425133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21510109116305545,0.0797600264181522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10005727172211246,0.06911366989535347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08659332027227863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959449797724469,0.0,0.0,0.10658628876059628,0.4347528948011798,0.0985726124228272,0.09860881684369537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14510764496624393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11480476436343022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356724064221133,0.0,0.0,0.10740886116685858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954764989756504,0.0,0.0,0.11438029019102272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09796395781399234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105415623040733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10953398799870737,0.0692580533400351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1070309669846132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735702997688121,0.07864735098981764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11361027584472295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07768120702088158,0.17116968434264912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08451015290316047,0.1077668923097245,0.0,0.0,0.07766801255894824,0.07848859682029916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09432298172177776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971653008810613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,akaWits,2020/04/16,"Can someone explain this for me? I'm 22M, I dont really know why this happens but it seems every year I end up getting extremely depressed like thinking my life is worthless. I feel like it's always work related too like its normally whenever I'm at a job for a year it seems I start getting tired of it and go in a spiral of depression.

I'm currently in that stage now, I recently got promoted to manager in a food chain and I actually feel like it's made me be in a bad place mentally like I'm so mentally exhausted I just dont even want to speak to anyone and people are starting to pick up on it too I feel like I've lost my whole personality and I'm just stale to everyone.

I dont even know how to explain all this tbh.",2.4003846153846164,3.5580877564102567,5.062051282051282,81.92461538461541,75.28205128205127,9.302564102564103,29.025641025641022,9.725611199111238,2.741548717948718,574,25,125,16,12,206,90,156,0.177,0.672,0.15,-0.6843,2,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,3,9,12,0,0,5,0,7,4,0,3,1,23,32,7,0,2,3,0,3,6,0,0,3,1,0,1,11,4,1,0,10,0,0,1,3,6,0,0,3,4,13,6,18,28,2,19,0,4,0,0,4,9,0,2,14,70,24,4,0.0,0.0,0.11835303292486983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009157394751144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08480268996029132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10126480174799797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089187751672273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4264222659559756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1074192146907238,0.0,0.0,0.16021028143095706,0.0,0.10218470807890144,0.11588945914239054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839703757360932,0.2599301090960621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14665380355272228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1267289247859449,0.0,0.06892694558335295,0.0,0.0969997177898006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10724863417012352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12035295504902603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330603793007684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08566455382202377,0.35551143955797904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13239284241874935,0.0,0.0,0.11475927831459475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24444600643036424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11882990262056067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08408116787683399,0.10589813447772006,0.1267131227819843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07769589268600839,0.0,0.11975063118160978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2208198421482413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10276123382512656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17168702651557222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771214623371475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393949886081033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07153484043568162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094374898829204,0.13540621640541514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829421530820088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15620233417173227
mentalhealth,Tripzion,2020/04/16,"I’m 19, suffering from depression, Bipolar disorder, ADHD and Asthma. I’m unemployed, and I want to earn money but I can’t find the energy to make the steps to get a job. I want to get a job, but I fee like there’s something blocking me from doing it. Since this coronavirus epidemic the job market got killed and I really want to make money however I can. I’m also in college doing the online classes since we’re quarantined. 

To the outside I have a really good life! I have two loving parents a relatively big house compared to the rest of society. We go on vacations every couple months, my parents pay for my college. I’m basically coddled. I grew up in a “somewhat rich” neighborhood. Also I’m white, so I have what people call white privilege. So I can get away with a lot of things that other people that aren’t white normally don’t get away with. 

I have a beautiful, kind, and caring girlfriend who also has a job and lives a little bit less than a half hour from me and my school. I should have every reason NOT to be depressed, unmotivated, and anxious to even get out of bed, do my school work, and find a job. 

Yet here’s another thing I haven’t told you. I have a history of drug abuse and prescription drug abuse. 
I have abused marijuana, LSD, I’ve done cocaine twice, I’ve drank alcohol in excess, I regularly vape nicotine in the form of Juul / Disposables. I abused adderall in the past, and I’ve abused Klonopin. 

I also don’t have a solid sleep schedule. I never go to sleep at the same time every night and when I wake up the times I wake up varies as well. I barely eat, I barely drink enough water, I’m 5’11 152Lbs. 

I’m constantly on edge, whenever my parents try to talk to me I always feel annoyed even if I wasn’t annoyed before they started talking to me. I’m quick to anger and as of recently I’ve been having thoughts of self harm, hopelessness, lack of enjoyment of my favorite videogames etc. I’ve also been having suicidal thoughts. I thought it all out completely, like how I’d do it and all the different ways I could do it. I even thought up a suicide note and everything. Usually when those things happen, I just sit in my room, listen to sad music and further compress the problem. But I never actually go through with suicide because I know how much pain it would bring to everyone who loved me. 

But with that being said, it doesn’t stop those thoughts from ruining every day of my life. Deep down there’s a part of me that knows I don’t want to die. I just want this anguish to cease. 

How do I find the strength to pull myself out of this hole of depression before these thoughts consume me entirely ?",3.685623773479116,5.282054042145597,4.950461639099153,82.24679983179145,72.75478927203066,8.311073731426973,28.44051957760957,8.9110942124816,2.3172663676291942,2078,82,404,42,41,689,256,522,0.213,0.662,0.125,-0.9962,13,1,6,0,5,4,60.0,1,1,1,3,23,27,4,1,28,0,35,18,4,6,4,69,78,34,5,12,8,3,1,2,1,2,8,2,2,1,23,23,5,2,13,1,5,7,11,15,1,3,14,6,54,12,64,59,14,52,0,7,3,2,18,24,0,3,21,266,77,15,0.0,0.3620694673744871,0.05964157541296908,0.0,0.0734510030392713,0.0,0.0,0.06531570477340773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443770321310521,0.050854410212548384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408671791542563,0.0,0.06904504486128478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11484325112737767,0.0,0.0,0.03725648064610767,0.0,0.10401247921535883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0667241581904642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624074991952035,0.0,0.0623130633233654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06408022620471296,0.06604598587252165,0.0,0.048797114709546036,0.06762502440635569,0.0,0.03941554085764399,0.0,0.15792047626144542,0.0,0.06343000919784537,0.06385447065823757,0.07004561140159188,0.0,0.0,0.06254411973145609,0.0,0.059871592931270486,0.14175310778248998,0.06253815821810457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06315040999570927,0.06816183871655886,0.12110201165646978,0.0,0.20597552330775584,0.05840010810197568,0.05492820262159775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030902695005097264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16758005327965625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15965608438237947,0.0,0.10420294743789346,0.051262211520420924,0.048881011670140716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05404574217253747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060188135393647486,0.07052104833902784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032469750600629,0.0,0.06761713160695955,0.06364416360725725,0.06717683457472358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633777809881502,0.05971755802272841,0.06125549506069874,0.053967611368338386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051959661766911566,0.11032132662729388,0.0,0.08159241728775897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04878316960822602,0.0,0.044928177606237664,0.0,0.0942747118654049,0.0,0.0,0.057354356310772264,0.059881884082842875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503301476258827,0.0,0.2035902688769447,0.06618397673829106,0.05834328733297385,0.08474194857211724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0584809107298194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830649250623113,0.06283866537023151,0.06034586629395819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05813645726010085,0.0,0.0,0.12370774786527355,0.0,0.0,0.06375857355000891,0.0,0.0,0.10111356640224567,0.0,0.12232268540001084,0.0,0.0,0.047051010006592855,0.0,0.0,0.043259071974340715,0.0,0.0,0.05109671968097654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20055690627941294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09824738793497352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218106650388051,0.0,0.0,0.29112140149865856,0.0712758669710163,0.0,0.0,0.05840010810197568,0.0,0.041494570075071034,0.0,0.05970262820314645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06731196627761059,0.0,0.1802425537843101,0.04851199222848152,0.0,0.0,0.05495170680381563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044494052840841326,0.0,0.0,0.043415908599473266,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,spaceloafman,2020/04/16,"Relapsing at its finest As a little background information, I'm a teenager and have struggled with depression, trauma and suicidal thoughts/intents for quite a few years. It's gotten a lot better in the past 2 months due to therapy and me finding passion in things again generally, but recently everything just collapsed. I'm aware that this happens and relapses are normal so I was sort of prepared for it, but now that it actually happened I just feel awful. My boyfriend broke up with me last week which really got to me, it still does, and now this quarantine bullshit on top gave me the rest. I've had a lot of thoughts on self-harm again and even suicide, especially at night when I can't fall asleep.  I didn't do anything because I'm afraid to be sent to a mental hospital again and because I wanted to stop hurting myself, but every time the urge gets stronger and I don't know what to do anymore. I've tried all the coping mechanisms my therapist has told me but nothing seems to work. At this point I'm so mentally unstable, I can barely get myself to get out of bed anymore at all. On top of that, I'm stuck at home with my mother who treats me like shit most of the time. She's been very emotionally abusive in the past and she starts yelling at me a lot now for the smallest things. I don't know what I could do anymore, I feel helpless. I've lost my purpose in life entirely. I know it's probably just another relapse, I've had those before, but I'm tired of hearing ""It gets better."" I just want to feel okay and be able to enjoy life like everyone tells me I should.    
I don't know what to do anymore with myself. I hate turning to the internet with my problems since I feel like I'm exposing myself and everyone I know and not know will see this, but I can't take it anymore. I'm struggling more and more every day. I was hoping to find some advice or recommandations on what I could do from other people. I'd be really grateful for that and just overall, I thank anyone who took their time to even read this, it means a lot to me.",6.0812059663598825,5.733821379562046,6.624385909235161,79.39666137734055,66.34793187347933,9.87288691420713,33.44134137310907,9.43228470229965,2.864932423569237,1621,64,325,28,23,531,202,411,0.18,0.723,0.09699999999999999,-0.9918,0,1,0,0,1,3,39.0,0,0,1,7,17,23,2,3,16,2,27,6,2,0,2,68,72,25,2,8,13,1,4,3,0,2,3,2,2,0,29,20,0,1,16,1,0,3,7,12,0,0,15,7,42,11,48,50,12,46,0,5,1,1,12,20,1,10,26,213,71,2,0.07980090107676886,0.09455101863605984,0.07787416803255373,0.0,0.0,0.07798051695129714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367820274773458,0.0,0.0,0.3957052536318541,0.05579864549624551,0.0,0.06566934210874717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729177722242673,0.0,0.06790468920224094,0.0,0.0,0.14115482410192418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12742905210276084,0.0,0.0,0.05146497943068591,0.0,0.0687323991640152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06983430630106295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08976527280372497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10541548508196624,0.0,0.13447140188363824,0.1525063615426773,0.07171990429599419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613989333328311,0.05700977967421765,0.0,0.0,0.14587315573789594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16677070860753174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382407054214098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14113534655132742,0.0,0.0,0.07878686858172998,0.0,0.0,0.0899414152663499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004681034776373,0.07926030075654943,0.0,0.0,0.0854285150841745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2631389295476021,0.06504838526195203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11273147284708435,0.11696006810069492,0.07998146732785387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08711211028592604,0.27137548955296426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.086926575708393,0.0,0.0,0.16084107782627688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636963178944713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07488773979925442,0.07818793971963367,0.07657111682536354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15235797947589427,0.05532389693613028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07543764544827168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08603886843639226,0.07635868498336866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08487808118221747,0.0798224963339265,0.0,0.10224500129726836,0.0,0.07879376256087023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359098630069296,0.0726477432280515,0.0832497437529066,0.0,0.08191447818554065,0.06601213001046101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05648348851512072,0.0,0.06372910268293387,0.06671712654799195,0.0,0.16685045687731634,0.0,0.17457846713525899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06000034626505402,0.0,0.06974950490819018,0.07346994812230008,0.0912592850987755,0.0926549968040418,0.1060323455207983,0.0,0.0,0.0633530016078049,0.13959764147913262,0.09171939660096624,0.0,0.07625318077133865,0.08866173735223419,0.054179573562404576,0.08680046496592111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06584410081478445,0.09413727805026284,0.0,0.06401146932763419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05809600640803246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051389163918124266
mentalhealth,Itakephotos98,2020/04/16,"What's the best way to describe what it's like having depression? My depression has gotten severely worse over the last few days for complicated reasons. I'm desperate to speak to a counselor and hopefully that will be in a couple weeks, but I'm dyspraxic and finding it really difficult to understand what I'm feeling and find the words to describe it. I was curious to see what others say it feels like to see if I can make some sort of resemblence as to how I'm feeling.
Thanks for reading!",7.696874999999999,7.035074104166667,8.245916666666666,70.14075000000001,63.16666666666666,12.263333333333335,38.99166666666667,11.602472056035307,4.666906666666668,398,19,72,11,5,133,63,96,0.133,0.6779999999999999,0.18899999999999997,0.7143,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,1,1,8,0,0,5,0,6,0,0,3,0,18,20,7,0,2,2,0,3,2,0,1,0,2,0,0,10,3,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,2,7,3,5,14,16,3,6,0,2,2,0,2,2,0,4,5,47,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055234079535236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2166947220436566,0.0,0.1263014652538125,0.0,0.3373557250330505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2970698035223224,0.13990909520032704,0.0,0.0,0.3579908806863056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19451464340897406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596368338598896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19135637658483226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307256177742634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19589434133108385,0.0,0.1254609796950894,0.20135751884056846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15574089715102385,0.0,0.0,0.3121203908195401,0.0,0.0,0.2212449745645007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18030439733228154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20387774569721795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15544974310939905,0.15709211309446594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995790606099509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RedBlack42,2020/04/16,"How is high functioning autism(or mental health regardless to autism)treated in your country? Or just any country (like Russia for example, please no discrimination/or country hate) Just curious; I have ASD (autism spectrum disorder),and other mental health ""issues"" and want to know what it is like in other countries, I live in Israel, and a person like me here gets a disability fund, support in finding a job, and gets a place to be in, helping hand I guess.... what about you? How are stigmas dealt with there?",5.72441011235955,8.494487775280902,5.189199438202248,77.67346207865171,70.12359550561797,7.596067415730338,31.3497191011236,8.472884824447931,2.7786955056179767,408,18,64,7,8,124,63,89,0.023,0.768,0.20800000000000002,0.9365,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,2,0,0,7,5,1,0,4,0,5,3,1,2,0,14,12,6,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,4,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,4,11,11,0,7,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,2,3,42,11,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676395579269754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1838139333208892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2101468207553048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215489984874884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985577693823964,0.0,0.4275481147410532,0.0,0.0,0.13480202080753526,0.2124872671446137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20991005784375372,0.19957394032008666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052662249683444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29476143229117324,0.0,0.17758674836425195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4053498535116512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17560439593407434,0.2101206172591456,0.22076203494486535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2282210151107011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11862184829697027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bumbleclaat,2020/04/16,"Have had bouts of mania, delusion and hallucinations as a child, now an adult and not sure if I should be aware of any info / do anything about it. So basically having read some things about mental health recently, specifically with bi-polar and schizophrenia and realised I had quite a few episodes growing up as a child, which my mum always explained to me as simply being a type of nightmare that continues when you wake up.  But, that type of a nightmare doesn't exist and I was always fully concious when the bout came on, although normally at night.  I just want to know what people make of the symptoms and if you have any advice.

It would always start with me thinking about mortality and the fact I would die one day, always as I was getting ready to sleep the inevitability of death was always a major feature.  Through the whole experience I would just be thinking ""shit im gonna die, shit im gonna die"" again and again and again. 

After thinking about my mortality id start having minor visual hallucinations such as the walls warping and being too close / too far away.  If I would close my eyes to avoid looking at it I would feel an intense sensation of speed, as if I was rushing forward.  
This would then come along with a panic response, really fast heart beat and my mind moving a mile a minute, and I would become very rushed.

  I would then become convinced the only way to feel better would be to gather up soft this like blankets and towels, but no matter how many I had they always felt 'too thin', it was hard to describe but it was never enough.  Then the visual hallucinations would get worse, I'd see faces coming out of the wall, or I spent one night feeling like my room was inside of a glitch ms paint program. 

I'd normally just walk around until I felt a bit better a few hours later and just try to sleep as fast as possible.
I had the last bout when I was 16/17 and haven't had any real issues since then.  

Since then I've  smoked a fair amount of weed and used to experiment with magic mushrooms a lot and have never had any issues during or after using these drugs and even went through a simulated psychotic experience (volunteering for university research) and was fine after.

So I think I'm good, but I understand these would be fairly severe symptoms,  is there some way I should prepare myself for a potential future problem?

Edit: also apologies if I used the names in the title wrong, those just seem to describe what happened",9.380078180525944,7.396756076759066,8.819786780383797,71.60717839374557,60.727078891258,10.980241648898367,35.33972992181947,9.23628265651192,3.0610949538024164,1956,61,355,24,21,624,242,469,0.085,0.847,0.068,-0.8766,1,1,2,0,0,0,42.0,0,2,1,4,27,14,2,2,30,0,43,12,8,5,4,96,76,52,6,22,17,1,8,2,0,15,4,0,1,3,16,31,0,1,14,1,1,10,6,6,0,2,20,11,32,8,55,35,10,62,0,0,3,0,11,19,2,11,35,247,48,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473665433484127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052978399746029886,0.3307412218236813,0.0,0.0,0.18020330028987014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054516354426651266,0.058974651936880174,0.0,0.0,0.062242057010262836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14633114080781814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11718171939394392,0.07232551877944211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576991756614343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413335243397585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04272439724700505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2062644975598021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682649985408106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06845176151996596,0.0,0.043756095022766776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1944093939811059,0.0,0.0,0.10049074466611796,0.04732749338889703,0.1272166934094504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922355825779594,0.0,0.0,0.05556557238852957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0585827749117617,0.0,0.0593450813993076,0.0,0.0,0.07041839063378029,0.0,0.07850404794651272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06524080984711439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14311814109874352,0.13829113441562832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03640809822365063,0.05400085811655452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473072844031064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05563152799156381,0.0,0.0,0.05632157219831802,0.0,0.0,0.04422096935236609,0.06716494475410484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06676227386762529,0.0,0.06689146613304718,0.0,0.0,0.07041100430829207,0.0,0.0,0.10218888672951873,0.0,0.0,0.12433828127427482,0.12981769869375392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978254590081809,0.050384492320113536,0.0,0.07772760453954844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04592793344326599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07468452237787793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06339026706271593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07046276707205656,0.06626580016827625,0.0754045824705102,0.042440083531252865,0.0,0.06541178194330713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05279097728386,0.06030957507627097,0.0,0.07484123927779945,0.13600497833652878,0.10960184952512636,0.0,0.13259143194877562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09378117033804877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0624378358699444,0.13771381088009524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04401214283164735,0.16979584704073916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044977956839001784,0.0,0.0,0.06896637168450331,0.0,0.17165067445213197,0.0,0.05466143289479999,0.039074711655020224,0.10516895529603322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06141244156577257,0.0,0.07396338385763328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06751224184571564,0.5176664670915483,0.07243164887157104,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Moonlight_si,2020/04/16,"How did you push through? Hi!   
I am really new here, so sorry if something's not right.  
I rarely share my thoughts or opinions on the internet (or ask questions), so here it goes...  


It's been around a year, that I don't have any excuse for not moving forward, but I still can't find the strength, reason or solution how to do that. How did you push through?  
So here is the background. I am f25 and I work in creative industry. I have quit my job a year ago because of the stress, that I couldn't handle. The best part, I have created the stress my self. I am one of those perfectionist here. I have done everything ""right"" all my life. I have been bullied at school (that made me kind shy/timid. Parent really didn't know how to help with self esteem), so I have compensated my self esteem with good grades (couldn't imagine how someone could have something less than A... yup), also my parents expressed love for this behavior, so I have mistaken love and my worth with being perfect. So perfect became normal. I missed my exploration and ""finding yourself time' train, also social life kinda died. I am at this place where anything that requires my creativity (work mostly), I just freeze or panic (can't stop crying) and I can't do anything about it. Even if it is my own project. Now there is no rules, no anything to fit my self in, to be right and to be good. I am afraid to express myself, not only to be neglected by someone, but mostly by myself. I have my ideals, but I guess I am nowhere near them and I just can't accept it. It also seems that the solution would be to explore more, just let everything flow, improvise or 'Just do it'. But just how can I be 'not productive' or do stuff that is uncertain and it might or might not bear any fruits. I just don't feel I can afford that, because I am really productivity/work oriented (tho it's what I need). 

I have had my therapy for at least two years now, I have analysed my problems back and forth, but I can't still deal with them. It is closely connected with fear. I consider myself a hard worker, but when topic hits my esteem, I  just can't move a finger and the fear rises just from one little thought. This stops me from enjoying everything, because I am neither happy neither sad (something that scares me a lot. Experienced quite a lot of downs), basically just waiting for something to happen.  


Thank you...",3.1544155844155877,5.118749885281389,4.137010822510824,85.97408766233767,75.03896103896103,7.2174025974025975,26.0521645021645,8.07648339933343,1.6101426839826845,1845,67,365,30,40,596,214,462,0.155,0.6920000000000001,0.153,0.3196,4,0,4,0,0,0,82.0,0,3,2,11,42,27,0,8,15,1,58,6,1,8,3,91,74,41,1,10,29,2,4,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,25,16,1,5,13,0,1,9,20,12,0,3,10,6,60,15,38,50,13,40,0,3,0,2,23,18,0,21,15,281,85,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06890411599450452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1864851008081476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10571991220829463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19189873419513054,0.06919734561190148,0.07266828159744781,0.0,0.0,0.059770579078283585,0.0,0.1421528547191845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08157421387086222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06206212572707737,0.0,0.08538419370489188,0.0,0.08013756711209159,0.0,0.0,0.08067282725911351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0795461175392745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05134079694371434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20957966699599329,0.0,0.0,0.17493866796609098,0.0393032857398981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420900176564163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1303946692490006,0.0,0.0,0.08562980112038954,0.0,0.06873754044046088,0.08274642456463319,0.06963198549013011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0521016583743561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713633072183178,0.0,0.0,0.08094519741790343,0.0427190949520216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794855306075042,0.10980784563307257,0.0,0.07790719304942323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13216875958789578,0.1403110836424447,0.07355124468582758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16492127159180744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1652321612755488,0.0,0.057636781199572974,0.0,0.07507338326560953,0.0,0.0,0.07616017956890883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10534549428565863,0.059118163720349226,0.0,0.09120094376588986,0.1726228410437641,0.08417543352509413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08121267435208121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437836552328005,0.0,0.0,0.08707685649010027,0.16535363196630834,0.0,0.0,0.14939000221925325,0.07992073248474517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19914634125605815,0.0,0.0,0.07782260132858979,0.07866823527504851,0.0,0.07076366495093914,0.3243628342694343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07923728128644826,0.13172297289234858,0.2393654392065025,0.0,0.08701383723327287,0.0,0.0,0.12415264864381348,0.12997371094408694,0.17808190522877507,0.0,0.08898375253332226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156454642464143,0.08889252697251596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1234199544323892,0.04532575177437995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07593219475855156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697679576724225,0.0,0.0,0.05521809217807494,0.0,0.0,0.15016924474290672
mentalhealth,cavalier2523,2020/04/16,"My mental health has gotten to a point where I need help Hey everyone,

TLDR BELOW

Please excuse me this is my first Reddit post I’m sorry if I put way too much unnecessary info
Alright well it’s been quite a life for me in terms of my mental health. Ever since junior year of high school I have had random unexplained bouts of depression and anxiety. I remember the first memorable feeling of bad anxiety I have ever felt was walking into gym class the first days of junior year and it was one of the most overwhelming feeling I have ever felt. Just hundreds of kids and after summer you haven’t seen them  for months. I just felt so out of place and just strange. Just starting to worry for no reason and having brain fog. Senior year is when depression really hit. Again not many external factors for this. Slowly I’m not having as much fun with my friends, I’m less funny, less interesting, less energetic. It shows but I just do my best to hide it. I guess my friends kinda noticed but it wasn’t just too obvious. After high school man shit just got even worse for my mental health. I had no fucking energy. I’m still depressed and don’t really have a plan for life. My grades and focus have just taken a hit because of my depression and fatigue. I forgot to mention keep in mind I am a weird but goofy fun loving person at heart. This really showed itself in middle school and high school without the mental health struggles. I go to community college for a bit but I’m just not doing too well. I struggle to make friends and my grades aren’t that good. The mental focus just isn’t there. I drop out of school and my parents are eventually fine with it. School just wasn’t for me. 2015 was the shittiest year of my life. The fatigue was just getting too much. My parents are getting a divorce. I’m working shit jobs at Walmart and Subway, Walmart I lasted one or two days and walked out. I couldn’t take it, I just felt like shit and walked out. Subway I tried my best but I’m just not good with food and I got fired. I’m losing that close bond with my friends. I don’t even hit them up anymore because I just feel like I don’t fit in anymore and that connection is just not the same. We’re always goofy and making fun of each other but their jokes are actually starting to get to me. 2016, 2017, 2018 are all gradually better years for me as I’m starting to get in a better situation with life and just accept that I was depressed. I started to eat healthy and I really think that helped. I still always felt different than everybody else. I’m a weird motherfucker. My thoughts are just weird but you know I just accept who I am. 2019 was the best year of my life ever since being depressed. I had two back surgeries but I had disc replacement surgery in October of 2018 and I’m finally getting back to playing sports, I’m feeling happier and more clear headed than I’ve ever felt since depressed. The one thing that I’m starting to really notice is a problem is my over active mind. But other than that I’m still doing well. I can have so many thoughts and in reality I’m just sitting somewhere doing nothing. Well the beginning of 2020 has been good but I would say a month ago I made a really bad decision. I took a hit of weed from a bong. Keep in mind weed has really fucked me up mentally before. All my friends (I have a very small group of friends) smoke weed and I first tried it when I was depressed and not having fun because I’m like hey I’m not having any fun on New Year’s Eve and everyone smokes weed now so I’m like let me just try this finally after being against it for so long. I got completely fucked up and I started feeling so sad. Time started to feel like it was in slow motion and I was just having bad thoughts. It like the weed was making my anxiety worse. Me and my friends go in my friends house so they can calm me down and then I all of a sudden start feeling like laughing and then I keep cycling between being sad and laughing. I try weed more times since then and I never get a good effect. So back to the time I took a bong hit. It was just one big hit and I got completely fucked up mentally. My thoughts were RACING and I started connecting all these thoughts together and I was thinking of so many moments that happened in my life. All while I’m just sitting there with my head down and my hands covering my eyes. Thought after thought after thought after thought. This was my mental health struggle just amplified and I was experiencing this terrible feeling. I can’t just stay in the moment. Too many thoughts distracting me and I just start to feel reality just being altered and like I just broke away from realty. Ok so fast forward to now, recently these nonstop thoughts have been ruining my life. I can’t be present or it’s just so hard to be present and just be in the now. I’m always in my fucking head. As I was driving home I was just thinking what would it be like if I committed suicide and just ended this. I wouldn’t have to experience these racing thoughts anymore. I cried and then told myself I am a fucking fighter and always have been. Then the thoughts started coming back and ruining my mood. Meanwhile I’m just sitting here driving a car home. What the fuck is wrong with me. I just wanna have normal mental health? I can’t take this anymore. Can anyone please give me advice on what to do next? There’s other things I’m leaving out or else this would be too long to read, it already is a really long read. I am suspecting I might have low testosterone but this can’t be the cause of all this? I’ve gotten my testosterone tested before when I was young and had the terrible fatigue and it was very low, talking 200 to 300 ng/dl somewhere around there. I mean I really just wanna find the root cause to all this and steps I can take right now to help. Thank you so much, this is my first reddit post so I thank you for any input you may have for me








TLDR

Mental health problems since junior year of high school

Depression and anxiety

Unexplained fatigue

I am a weird and goofy light hearted kid at heart

Over the years I am developing an over active mind and it’s ruining my ability to stay present.

Recently took a bong hit of weed and it just 
amplified all that for hours.

Now I am having really bad over active thoughts and it’s starting to really affect the quality of my life

I always feel like I’m not running optimally

Any suggestions for testing or next steps?

Possible health problems? Low testosterone, sleep problem? Vitamin or Mineral problem? Maybe it really just is a mental health problem idk? Please help god bless all of you",2.4457630380396442,4.807022216195573,3.5325385615731366,87.53354259122108,78.938884644767,6.502676129438591,24.58365747409304,7.648868740284048,1.3348222126324512,5247,191,1027,82,131,1689,405,1309,0.171,0.6659999999999999,0.163,-0.9705,6,0,2,0,2,1,98.0,0,6,4,15,90,107,10,5,47,2,110,45,13,10,18,235,234,94,1,17,65,2,19,10,8,6,22,1,2,4,55,69,2,4,45,8,0,18,26,55,4,11,64,24,132,51,127,145,26,176,1,24,2,8,41,55,10,13,106,682,187,21,0.0,0.0,0.02650797504339007,0.0,0.0,0.02654417568032995,0.02407909213839391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029975956666671463,0.0,0.11301239340396604,0.0,0.0,0.05541699803091887,0.0,0.08312100795107318,0.0,0.10775686215666964,0.018993578225466674,0.0,0.0,0.02418156356369411,0.0,0.0,0.025521308028059988,0.08354921966669948,0.09072263789686827,0.04967644729368508,0.0,0.04622882920430562,0.0,0.08552027626637862,0.04804839202884025,0.029655861835591744,0.0,0.0,0.030323812627743824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055809462363139266,0.0,0.023399230228383538,0.05696150798323655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029838186554001212,0.03503684019550399,0.0,0.210565466183262,0.0,0.0,0.028380415891049338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027795374716822373,0.0453837808693353,0.0,0.024059086546686387,0.0,0.0,0.03588290081727097,0.12285617561596605,0.0,0.0519123982684678,0.0,0.026571433452261917,0.0,0.0,0.13734846242684678,0.07762336882759865,0.1564891927468839,0.05951328567168791,0.024827244190809592,0.11552767952831325,0.03284660535114097,0.0,0.1678936322221276,0.17578763130864264,0.08515186537637721,0.02605801640218652,0.030875655793298887,0.0911349114602239,0.08690157015309094,0.0,0.029924016021548733,0.0,0.024020880984300576,0.0,0.024333451930939432,0.0,0.08363376450008057,0.2598648843044775,0.0,0.09656779123296913,0.0728293579825798,0.11480029121900293,0.05449506311552477,0.0,0.026750896163887317,0.031343407286960424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02695590514239741,0.07243336803104006,0.0,0.0,0.014928527977930456,0.02214214310984147,0.0,0.028762568823709592,0.0,0.027776851753237342,0.1534929049944226,0.13270872933501193,0.0,0.0,0.07211739172852508,0.0,0.030389372249778536,0.0,0.0,0.02451641286083533,0.0257030682727988,0.05439619291285868,0.1101594212077216,0.02728971355901777,0.029589369077075663,0.0,0.0,0.30112221569464903,0.02881652595729505,0.10971087998255284,0.0,0.04336381235936052,0.0,0.07987414835941246,0.020141632252791045,0.020950416651867382,0.026234991722958102,0.05777807270217038,0.0,0.026614781347207787,0.02606442296761036,0.06185239024150455,0.0,0.0,0.07362764405747063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06032442670065796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02371840447603009,0.028380415891049338,0.0894531690380842,0.025678595012905432,0.03062313156231455,0.052030871684861764,0.0,0.0,0.15595267342354754,0.0,0.027307147104270887,0.0,0.028892071845551044,0.05434235239177889,0.0,0.2088221045186423,0.02792893651551371,0.05364200078940752,0.0,0.03077131876982585,0.02319775836763805,0.0,0.02160176413796645,0.0,0.19243868972829928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08364982888267622,0.11235098487002984,0.030533277733249414,0.027183442668743243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030407678464698582,0.2307203441269299,0.05790604697089065,0.06507919787023589,0.0,0.0,0.08519258424115507,0.0,0.029712815987968006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06127144809010133,0.021833253811838663,0.0,0.05001760148374139,0.0,0.0,0.03609287700746255,0.052216447234755714,0.0,0.3019106025990709,0.04751833489762693,0.0,0.0,0.025956199134233898,0.09054002811513144,0.07376981713645357,0.0,0.05307022047877248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04482600136217543,0.0,0.02156138013447059,0.0,0.0,0.09769416468033018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02618495822558115,0.0,0.019775588322702653,0.027586183134271792,0.05536451725961728,0.05788920632991956,0.029699378693844387,0.0,0.15743351590807142
mentalhealth,way2effincute,2020/04/16,"Moral support Recently my mental issues have been getting worse to a level I havent lived with for a long long time. My anxiety is back and I've been having daily attacks. My depression and ocd are in overdrive. Next week is the anniversary of when I lost my parents. I feel so lost right now, it feels like I'm drowning. I really need support from someone right now",2.171666666666667,4.757782833333334,3.489444444444445,86.07500000000003,81.77777777777777,6.377777777777778,25.66666666666667,7.645422480735847,1.6827166666666664,292,12,54,5,8,95,54,72,0.205,0.693,0.10099999999999999,-0.7964,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,5,7,1,0,3,0,8,0,0,0,0,6,17,4,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,2,8,3,6,13,0,14,1,3,0,0,1,4,0,0,11,33,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1370700106705795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20383984724340984,0.0,0.13777614965850796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15432499574641126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18119467676828152,0.1280041743448072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09361265287374787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18701436746946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875368929921369,0.0,0.15821668460031346,0.3171322355982303,0.0,0.0,0.39118599707995705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18056839971609648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13285756830273432,0.0,0.0,0.19055690581792956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19895499381872014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11478545476522388,0.0,0.17691579546107736,0.0,0.0,0.3060325725460233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15181619708678387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4066561576190416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10447962285378422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14372508237542506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1825967985377214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,latebloomer5,2020/04/16,"Anyone else feel like the lockdown was the best thing to ever happen to their mental health? First off, I obviously hate the virus for what it's doing to people, but in a purely selfish way, the lockdown has been a boon for my mental health.  I've deeply suffered from depression and social anxiety for years and years, and just prior to the lockdown was an extremely low point for me.  Since being locked down and staying at home, I've broken out of a lot of bad circular thoughts, gotten into exercise, and spent a ton of time tending to my hobby.  I really feel like this massive breakup of my daily routine has kind of restarted my entire system.  There have been some minor setbacks, but I was able to fight through them fairly quickly. I hope you guys are doing well, stay safe out there and make the best of the lockdown",9.434285714285714,7.4106064777070095,8.639945404913558,73.06617834394908,60.65605095541401,10.754868061874433,36.44131028207461,8.841846274778883,3.1391972702456776,655,22,116,7,7,206,104,157,0.184,0.69,0.126,-0.9155,0,4,0,0,1,0,15.0,0,1,2,3,6,15,2,0,12,0,12,3,0,1,3,23,22,8,0,1,3,0,2,2,0,0,3,0,1,1,4,9,0,1,3,1,1,0,0,7,1,1,8,2,12,8,25,13,5,20,0,3,0,0,6,9,0,3,9,85,16,0,0.15187765688052665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11618599180617532,0.0,0.0,0.10619638902227864,0.15561660754522327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681149956127374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31877246157861844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13081200332268691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12687429380841062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13738203580838912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15358781346356726,0.217002856844078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129187057355839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15038275848292107,0.13430491039578524,0.0,0.0,0.14994774284109666,0.0,0.3228776942891611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234567319838713,0.15084878240873587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1581572080775454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483995030301031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129120952683417,0.0,0.0,0.10137951531708507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30611391225887724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529284410054472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14357347694915695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729671604733392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12563476723197245,0.0,0.0,0.15482014478536546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3237627485387605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009007666201236,0.0,0.0,0.1205738946642385,0.08856108309479814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055341470873428,0.0,0.0,0.1365562533089258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19560846305295976
mentalhealth,MossyLunaMoth,2020/04/16,"If you live in America, Good luck with affording Mental Health Perscriptions Speaking from my own personal experiences, America doesn't care about your mental health. Do you need a new SSRI that's come out in the past 10 years that helps you a lot? How about you pay over $1,000 for it? Oops, you need that medication to save your life and don't have insurance? Sorry, here in America we don't consider mental health (or health in general) important. So I guess that just means you'll just have to go without it. Guess you'll just have to worry every day of your life about whether or not you can afford basic mental health care.

As of right now, I recommend to all of you in America to switch from your current pharmacy to Publix (or other cheap pharmacy) and get an RX card. I still can't afford Trintellix, but at least Lexapro has been around long enough to afford it. I'm so happy to have grown up in a conservative family that never got me mental health/ADHD help ever until I'm an adult so that now I can't afford it. It makes me so happy to be in a SOcIEty that belives my mental health isn't' important and that I should just ""suck it up"" and get back to work which I can't because of covid-19. :DDDDD",5.8998814463544775,5.853450514522822,6.497845287492591,79.13677385892119,66.67634854771785,10.371191464137523,28.8325429756965,10.125756701596842,2.5910708950800228,958,28,192,21,14,314,131,241,0.044000000000000004,0.826,0.13,0.9682,6,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,1,13,0,1,19,8,1,0,7,0,19,10,0,2,3,37,35,17,0,4,12,0,0,0,0,3,10,1,0,2,16,9,0,1,1,0,2,3,10,1,0,0,2,1,24,7,37,29,5,30,0,0,0,0,19,14,1,8,13,133,40,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279800065781848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0761454345488673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06577212864030083,0.0,0.052142129630536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17441990059907425,0.0,0.0,0.07368194158149248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05516383204251143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838185483742897,0.0,0.0,0.07737247307973974,0.07206801508607164,0.0,0.0,0.08367090661773997,0.08063600347981575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08937836428776637,0.0,0.048612245878339684,0.07174378341409428,0.06841118653118138,0.0,0.18845573797627566,0.0,0.0,0.1821099465629032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6364475491175441,0.0,0.0,0.11466634688223147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1208336251725695,0.0,0.0,0.07553011285601065,0.07569692667218815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271989657703103,0.0,0.0,0.057096139051604024,0.0,0.0,0.09317409771564612,0.0,0.08616881522725825,0.5172027833817593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.126848153252995,0.06597086146784148,0.08261148373920142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08165406926339289,0.0,0.0746869908091753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304752593068371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09575087583637594,0.0,0.0,0.06830939321283773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245393303369254,0.0,0.0622714392444217,0.08686625646728306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05508256757398483
mentalhealth,mya-is-confused,2020/04/16,"I'm spiraling again, I don't know what's wrong with me (TW) Every single time I get better, I get so motivated and excited and my confidence increases a bit and I'm working so hard to achieve my goals and improve myself, but then something gets in the way and I'm miserable. 

I don't understand why, I've been working so damn hard to build my self esteem, to self care, to watch out for myself and to love myself and now I just can't do this anymore.

I've been struggling to do my homework the past few days. All the teachers dumped the homework on the same day and it requires so much thinking. I don't have a passion, how can I come up with a passion project? I don't know what linear and non linear patterns are, I'm so fucking lost. Maybe I know but I can't remember because I'm so fucking stressed, and so damn tired. 

I achieved almost 2 months of no self harm (12 days left) and I'm trying so hard not to self harm but I really want to relieve some stress but I can't because my family members will see. 

I feel so alone and stupid and I hate myself for always falling back once I make progress. Why am I so incompetent? Why can't I finish my homework? Why am I so unmotivated and incapable of completing my tasks? I used to be able to do all of this, so why can't I now? 

I feel so worthless. Nothing I do works and I always end up back where I started.",1.6017165991902829,3.4101871649122835,3.4660526315789504,89.73640688259113,79.10526315789474,6.3495276653171375,25.69838056680161,7.321109707123232,1.1692429149797574,1062,42,231,14,26,357,139,285,0.292,0.614,0.095,-0.9971,0,1,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,11,21,23,7,4,8,0,22,6,0,4,2,44,50,34,0,1,6,0,5,0,0,1,1,0,3,4,5,19,0,1,9,0,0,3,11,16,0,0,3,7,37,7,22,45,9,26,0,3,2,5,5,7,4,2,15,144,42,12,0.09662966636236747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967606527355242,0.10007919236880433,0.0,0.0,0.16080724650933612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583066386555716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860449767863818,0.0,0.1178090954607243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08546108737096905,0.10549456880353657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09852038488610518,0.0,0.0,0.08323790139578467,0.10131436672460543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18695442249264296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08558520319256145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08141466151363115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09109384962636458,0.0,0.09771772541885276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1786651389646183,0.15145503729580725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596836031797776,0.09540179023122024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15931541264599502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049884152373002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548269555193378,0.0,0.08721204656609483,0.0,0.06450105263853663,0.0,0.09707748777091507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712887778965008,0.0,0.07103392312825182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271877099120507,0.0,0.0,0.10290744102477188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224395041753457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061903438615751726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946257516087377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700133340572858,0.0,0.4032232646524733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439023806411643,0.0,0.0,0.06839497520144701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213779126810572,0.10101830783184733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06191638847008695,0.0,0.0,0.056345535531088925,0.11106158668538038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06560520052216033,0.0,0.0,0.10059489051144044,0.0,0.08345700656216605,0.0,0.0,0.05699468080885129,0.07670013141770247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.435966220544454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2110426438967264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564937098809278,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,bianca-eliio,2020/04/16,"Feeling down about school I'm in highschool freshman, and I really cant get along with my class I have a few friends but stick with them more because I just wanna get through day by day. I've never had that problem, always had my group of trusted friends. I feel really isolated and left behind, because I'm not fitting in the atmosphere which is in my class- which is partying till you cant drink anymore and making fun of teachers. I'm sure there's more to it, they are okay people, but I feel like I'm classified as not cool enough. I've been wondering since mid september if I should change school, but I wanted to wait, maybe something changes. But it didn't, I'm crying again, and just wanted to know opinion from someone who I havent spoken to yet. I wanna change school, I'm scared, but really I dont think that something in my class will change. I'm just not brave enough and I've been putting it off for so long that I dont know if it has any sense know. Has anyone have been in that kind of situation? I'm feeling really lost and down, I'm scared which is not typical for me but I'm stressing over this since the beginning. If you have any advice, please help me.",4.3408750000000005,5.035632670833333,4.813333333333336,87.27000000000002,70.20833333333334,8.166666666666668,27.5,8.278499904357787,1.6046250000000004,931,30,198,13,16,296,124,240,0.094,0.738,0.168,0.9488,0,0,3,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,2,1,8,15,0,3,3,2,22,1,0,1,2,45,49,18,0,9,16,0,4,1,2,2,0,0,0,0,13,9,1,1,9,1,0,1,11,5,0,0,7,5,21,10,30,40,5,21,0,1,0,0,9,12,0,5,9,121,34,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022096065811365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703191545836253,0.0,0.0,0.14225718502521673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10373072628143913,0.07313567320274977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12752100989141235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4425930898388666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11489335157764867,0.1349110138267476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451705207616675,0.10246386483636913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2161504231761332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21154670581200008,0.07472311520348457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161620597146835,0.0,0.10929376453530702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07010822370792591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10892021839077848,0.1724490136558041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364342189031484,0.0,0.0,0.05110012523487598,0.0,0.0,0.09256381167504676,0.0,0.0,0.1141784495521861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0698183730157533,0.0,0.1050803355195561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08067057231259397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07251341695912107,0.0,0.0,0.11481455574193013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008386012723428,0.0,0.10514746421185736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2680264703556253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20943687835329608,0.3175689839511184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1730451169531474,0.11756983310883533,0.0,0.0,0.08862350968424393,0.16104560088335965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11981390266319827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09858011208048996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670206349998398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233863858602744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11342946290483145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,katesmith1999,2020/04/16,Supporting others whilst battling self-doubt I’ve been struggling lately to support my best friend. I am extremely logically driven and she very emotionally driven. Her feelings are intense and deep and she will often make emotional decisions. She will also seem ‘different’ to her normal self sometimes (acting quiet/short with me) which will prompt me to ask if she’s okay. She’ll often just say ‘yeah all fine you?’  I’ll press and assure her she can talk to me etc but she’ll maintain this stance. This is where I struggle: I have no idea what could be wrong so no idea how best to support her (give her a distraction? Support? A solution?). I ask what she needs and she says it’s fine. So this makes me insecure and doubt myself hugely because I deduce that I must be shit at reading her emotions and that maybe nothing is wrong after all. Because if it is...why would she not tell me when she seems to tell me other times? Have I done something? I always ask a few days later if something was wrong and she will usually say things like ‘trust your gut more’ ‘sometimes I can’t articulate things’. But this still doesn’t help me know what to do :( I don’t get why she can’t just say ‘oh I feel a bit fed up but I don’t really want to talk about it’. I’d then just know she needs cheering up. Can anyone relate to mine or her feelings? Be good to hear other perspectives!,2.0302835249042133,4.497152511111112,2.987701149425288,90.22500000000004,81.2962962962963,5.7982120051085575,21.532567049808424,7.0983637204850245,0.6663563218390802,1078,33,215,14,29,342,149,270,0.14400000000000002,0.693,0.162,-0.496,1,0,2,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,0,4,13,25,2,5,4,2,29,3,2,4,4,48,54,21,0,10,11,0,4,1,1,8,0,5,0,1,18,9,1,0,12,1,0,3,8,10,0,0,6,9,44,15,16,36,8,19,0,0,0,0,38,6,1,9,11,147,62,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001678390382117,0.07285181875232039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06121968912708459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24555309847806406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674403120734004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18376473230200424,0.0,0.0955861302604076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06990462659183183,0.0,0.0,0.056464991464539975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147514057239854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895979887615559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29545889760828065,0.0,0.0,0.0976456889235212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132809574984358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764388895712661,0.0,0.045743274077968785,0.08398963294190627,0.0,0.07343601718946514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867955455346047,0.0,0.05868550151651512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19767528389206607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09623461478243203,0.0,0.09876455876279308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04277438962736694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11688575230678384,0.0,0.08795961248682539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129840143904494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578418562947515,0.08401028244454156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08757754543055421,0.0,0.0560892396092151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785053494237877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15941147734508473,0.18267552508260515,0.0,0.08987277101311675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348064657042513,0.17318599697535686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992061939675186,0.0,0.0,0.18306059241937409,0.0,0.0,0.3974202952788673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14074493969770746,0.15305185168105126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633377786268426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051053355257531866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09642819858932844,0.07224109737582697,0.05164153041936107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15800746680601727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06219574449957298,0.2871791785605011,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sunsabun,2020/04/16,"living alone, mental heath and classwork (F20) Hi everyone. I've never posted on here but I'm just feeling completely alone. I've been living alone for the past month and have had little to no interaction outside of my caretaking job. I live over 300 miles from home and quarantine measures have prevented me from leaving along with my job. I've fallen behind on school to the point where I don't know what to do. I've had a resurgence in my depression to the point where even getting out of bed sucks the life out of me. Whenever I try and do my schoolwork I just think, ""well if you fail you can always just end it all and then you won't fail anymore."" The only thing that kept my spirits up was talking to my boyfriend, but he cut interactions with everyone for a while in order to boost his own mental health. I don't blame him, but he also knows that I'm by myself and not doing well. I just don't want to be here anymore",3.2655258467023174,4.873642967914441,4.163978609625669,87.41341889483068,73.86631016042782,7.125704099821746,24.766131907308374,7.793537801064563,1.2164320142602492,733,23,150,10,15,236,112,187,0.16899999999999998,0.759,0.071,-0.9666,2,4,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,3,0,2,12,7,2,0,7,0,15,2,0,0,2,29,25,13,0,2,9,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,2,0,5,11,0,2,4,0,0,1,7,5,2,0,5,1,20,2,27,18,2,23,1,3,0,0,11,14,1,1,6,103,25,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.411802839426308,0.0,0.10598921362035654,0.11028080054316493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2628807484011741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389617658587867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1141533020209442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738780344301385,0.0,0.0,0.08753896162951179,0.0,0.0,0.25328818666366404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670143244186611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06924473501388223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14087986582200912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1329446931662688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2630436104333384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567694451460309,0.0,0.0,0.1403367816580219,0.0,0.0,0.09361429270401836,0.0,0.13283616907024634,0.3510958849130967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2671307906866988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578919261756918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10222014818419488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079981172081201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12652087412887975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505792444129896,0.0,0.12693311789828615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13413378909473658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652763985915092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805121390671465,0.08492389535227005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08998343284186082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781733306519537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23833206175077135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Slav_the_survivor_69,2020/04/16,"To put it simple, I do not know what the fuck is wrong with my life [M14]. - low self esteem 

- So ashamed of my interests that when I opened up to my mom about it, I started crushing salted sticks in my hand and cringed at myself so hard

- Enormous amount of self doubt I have. 

- awful reputation. I had beef with classmates and did stupid stuff in my ""buddy retard"" phase. Now damage is already done

- I always think people talk behind my back

- I sometimes find it hard to take criticism

- I also had (still sometimes have) a lot of violent thoughts and of taking revenge. Only thing that's on my way is consequences I will face.

- I have a father who considers simple responding to what he said as talking back and disrespect

- My parents won't do anything when it comes to my butthurt brother and yet they wonder why I smack him sometimes 

- I only have one friend irl

- Words not only can hurt me, but ruin my self esteem even more

- I am lazy as fuck


I was going to a psychologist but not anymore because of a lockdown. I dont know how do I help myself with those things. Is this a ""teen phase"" or something more serious?",3.8140580103008936,5.427798576036867,4.61404174573055,84.71753320683112,72.4562211981567,6.949200325291407,27.05042016806723,7.510576382923642,1.5023463811330993,869,31,166,10,17,280,137,217,0.20800000000000002,0.743,0.049,-0.9831,1,1,1,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,1,0,13,14,4,2,6,1,21,5,2,1,0,26,34,16,0,0,6,4,3,0,1,2,1,1,0,3,14,10,0,0,6,0,0,3,5,12,0,1,7,5,31,2,23,25,4,20,0,4,0,2,17,8,2,4,8,122,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509119436859476,0.09789754866579034,0.10186149768737654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140565997633047,0.0,0.0,0.10073949923269462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882636140498498,0.0,0.07462481427494491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545217935855324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12527601206576774,0.1434728645351095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08085586696561675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11188774082884496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457976419225697,0.22634674785508094,0.0,0.0,0.06957291245800165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21932478225899515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0820541364564991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13105089153354124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13455535028484175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08646738156424062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407531902908887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14337436239016976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08295353576928834,0.2793129829829801,0.0,0.0,0.13593058835805846,0.0,0.0,0.08486915650407602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306379936879225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1164474542522725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38312569736255375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424327854642364,0.36322329351241,0.0,0.08664801816510044,0.0,0.0977630913401915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14013920478919512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840860481446701,0.19678973833541175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16265802347379502,0.07844044591100321,0.0,0.09718613666465006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09716962921284998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046311190505946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327569881980653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338447537928784,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsabbeydabbey,2020/04/16,"I’ve tried to talk to my friends but they haven’t helped so I’m putting this all here So I’ve mental health issues since I was 10 and I’m 17 now (girl). I used to cut when I was 11 and I can’t even remember why. I don’t need to give my whole life story about what was going on at the time, but I have some daddy issues. I have gotten diagnosed with anxiety and depression from my family doctor. I want to see a psychiatrist because I’m not doing good but we can’t afford it (idk if they are even open now). I’ve been getting these fits of anger where I am trying to workout and I just breakdown and I cry and stuff more often it was like once a week or so ago and then yesterday and today. I don’t know. I’ve always had issues I guess. I feel like I’m crazy and that’s why nobody stays with me long or loves me anymore. My mom were fighting one time and said she was going to send me to a ward, she didn’t mean it but sometimes I wish she would. I journal every night and I use headspace, I try really hard to better myself on my own. I’m not good at eating but I force myself to eat whenever I can and am willing. Before this I would lift everyday (which made it okay for me to eat in my head) and I’ve gotten much skinnier since quarantine. I ate to fuel my body and I don’t do anything besides run sometimes and body weight stuff and work (grocery store). I tried reaching out to my mom and my best friend (lives in the state I used to live) and they don’t seem interested in helping me. This all word vomit I’m sorry if it’s not coherent. Thanks for being an outlet reddit lol",0.37289869281045895,2.3895318911764707,2.461568627450984,94.23594771241831,84.5,5.307189542483661,18.26797385620916,6.56203326957186,-0.11418300653594747,1233,30,281,13,36,414,184,340,0.109,0.7559999999999999,0.136,0.8867,2,1,0,0,2,0,29.0,1,0,3,3,13,16,3,0,6,2,28,14,3,4,2,56,57,32,0,7,13,2,3,2,2,3,5,1,0,1,14,23,5,0,5,1,1,5,11,4,0,1,14,5,48,12,29,39,8,31,0,1,1,1,20,11,0,8,15,177,62,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08114084503931457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616500695299808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07002453401176617,0.0,0.09077878439025223,0.0,0.0,0.07532605384468646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05579929244277889,0.0,0.07789010991893859,0.0,0.09606103425559424,0.08095585808619299,0.0,0.2033509795658416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10054763101188337,0.0,0.0,0.07883953507147239,0.09290677426680444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369063293744934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28099151493065383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1209168883129446,0.0,0.07712274657848442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629167952035799,0.0,0.04628318311218625,0.06539309814163383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14144045710823874,0.0,0.04782360753471812,0.08780935173010072,0.1040436569540194,0.1535515476655948,0.0,0.0,0.10083685601613407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199797737605496,0.0,0.09394200144469132,0.0972981326488548,0.0,0.0,0.12270885497702655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28661836104383465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05030560821647002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06465434798789617,0.0894394056092082,0.0,0.1616553403304217,0.08100618402681065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08261451243375596,0.08661326049052609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0997091749678493,0.0,0.0,0.09224642199640484,0.0,0.0,0.21441093163275265,0.0,0.0,0.06728924680204534,0.06787253655866397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590002182577257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09748249698078047,0.06202693630163082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201862673719567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0586400915994726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10369206586392216,0.0,0.0870713799045427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294207470801935,0.0833306325656376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15143849777986734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18106222864024,0.1024666840480798,0.0,0.09756484083991936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20957287590479698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357290109063849,0.0,0.08427374312753376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10675036601031856,0.0,0.08676510846516124,0.0,0.0,0.2485868348542648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371722776080768,0.0,0.0,0.05399010746493984,0.0,0.07342438998804303,0.11146578144090748,0.0,0.0,0.1651934023613186,0.1021963022580915,0.10526149857619703,0.0,0.0,0.06663905509523597,0.0,0.0,0.1300486218020737,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PizzaFriez,2020/04/16,"My brother's constant cleaning is tearing my family apart My little brother has had an obsession with contamination for the past year. Recently, it's gotten so much worse. Now, he showers around 5 times a day, even in the middle of the night, every time he uses the bathroom. This is always accompanied by screaming and crying. My parents aren't helping. They tell him he needs to cope better and control himself, while yelling these things angrily at him. This happens just about all day, every day now and I can't take much more of it. I know it's kind of selfish of me, being the only household member not directly involved but I still feel like I'm on the edge of snapping. I'm pretty sure my brother has little to no insight on his issue. Whenever someone tells him what he's doing is excessive, he just starts going on about how 'dirty' something is. I don't think there's anything I can do to help without making people angrier. My parents keep going on about how he won't be able to go to the school we got accepted into next year and stuff. I just can't bear seeing him descend further and further into this vicious cycle. I just don't know what to do.",4.41845296708992,5.917251348017626,5.420290230629702,79.98484840632291,70.76211453744493,7.279502461777664,30.53355791655869,7.724431198458867,2.161135993780772,924,39,164,11,17,304,141,227,0.084,0.8190000000000001,0.096,0.7736,3,0,1,0,1,0,22.0,1,0,1,2,16,9,1,1,9,0,19,0,0,5,2,32,38,10,0,1,7,5,1,1,0,1,0,2,2,0,11,10,0,2,6,0,0,3,9,4,0,0,3,4,22,5,27,32,4,35,0,0,1,0,24,15,0,0,18,113,33,1,0.12762075565124031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619069218741088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502100790786544,0.11360952970103345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11287018738281945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13791269875493414,0.14313752927598195,0.0,0.0,0.1401854074738713,0.2469144887800663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429230548763188,0.0,0.21505198174845472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12030949047159965,0.0,0.06452888863192419,0.0911722933370788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217589449374204,0.0,0.102069976672197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11285461274837386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17108300476590646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320291198663986,0.0,0.11343519144234092,0.0,0.1328973781997736,0.14027405946965202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062349054837830375,0.25581904867606026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08518784538861149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876318792720192,0.09462917323867157,0.0,0.0,0.13572612146100035,0.11976343391160725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09706133548426747,0.0,0.0,0.2834154925050367,0.0,0.12182845185861076,0.08847616301685705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298361889871576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12601009992291962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291590180660243,0.1016972191391038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10813265211829036,0.09824869268632336,0.0,0.0,0.09033062771037237,0.0,0.10191810031753117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14609523222239232,0.0,0.0,0.1202810518716892,0.0,0.09595492565072568,0.0,0.22309233110337576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08478555928723101,0.0817742271210574,0.0,0.0,0.14883337783833778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11022335730636586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302185429050998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13005645295479362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16436716485713196
mentalhealth,thickasafatcap,2020/04/16,"Trying to find help after too much lsd use as a teen Hello!! When I was 15 I started using lsd as trying to find a reason to find any joy in my life. I was deeply depressed for a couple of years already and never seeked help just because of fear I guess. I had used acid only 3 times until i was around 16 and a half and thats when i really amped up my use. Going from 3 trips to 20-25 in about 3 months, i was just with a really good group of friends and had really deep conscious openings (in this span i was only taking 1 to 2 hits of 375 ugs and i knew it was good because of who i was getting it from). On my last trip I was with some good friends and took 3 hits, which i had only done one other time on my 3rd trip, putting me over my limit and it wasn't bad but extremely intense and i got stuck in a loop and i was doing some crazy shit that in reality doesn't make sense but that doesn't matter. Basically afterwards I came out of it and knew something wasn't right. The next day was spent with my ex who was already burnt out too, and i remember feeling like i was stuck in a tv screen and could see everything and hear it but i couldn't feel anything. It was as if i was wrapped in plastic and had lost all touch with any reality around me, I had forgotten my friends, how to deal with situations, anything academics related was gone and my sanity was more chaotic than ever. It took me years to find myself and had to stop smoking weed and calm down with my life, i was a kid who never had to try but could accomplish anything in great efficiency and well. After this i found myself to be happy just to exist and sometimes be able to have the happiness in at least not feeling like i'm falling through endless voids of nothingness. Now being almost 19 I haven't used lsd in over a year but i'm nowhere where i used to be, My sducidal thoughts are still around and with quarantine i've lost all confidence. Theres a lot more to this that goes into why i started smoking weed and using acid due to my parents, just didn't feel like getting into all that. Never really had any role models growing up and everyone saw me as smart and told me i'd go to collage and be something, but nothings working as i hope and i don't know. It is what it is",6.0625,4.762851728237791,6.719800955414013,81.8391918789809,66.74946921443737,9.718365180467092,31.939225053078562,8.59863814320734,2.241289384288748,1768,58,384,22,24,585,220,471,0.07400000000000001,0.7609999999999999,0.16399999999999998,0.9918,1,1,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,5,19,23,1,1,12,0,46,3,1,10,7,97,90,41,0,5,12,2,5,3,3,0,2,1,0,1,23,41,0,2,16,1,1,12,13,6,1,2,45,11,46,17,69,35,10,67,0,3,3,0,17,30,1,7,28,260,69,3,0.07243795249993483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253614578812524,0.0,0.15987416373495072,0.0,0.0,0.07848649126942248,0.0,0.14778087510957086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17883078838166944,0.1934554063881241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060482664602148274,0.08831500699838646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284971996919015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11567162148271395,0.08015121664930135,0.0,0.04671648672016593,0.07468034828761229,0.062390702343822275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741291753273606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655242751872373,0.0,0.0692175678739444,0.06510256088080069,0.0,0.0,0.08151283551199423,0.14650722120363746,0.15524906321922216,0.0,0.0,0.2648279050431281,0.0,0.0,0.07942447601001833,0.16789614723401766,0.0,0.07569168082996537,0.0,0.08233631547796677,0.18227255328470152,0.05793524794709365,0.07986309835961522,0.07979857140565443,0.0,0.0,0.15422309482886815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164283709745505,0.0,0.09710726526840156,0.0,0.0,0.07194723147060918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0398100042778462,0.059046599452176614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10233013619093123,0.10616857382746643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814916428050174,0.06158415680974955,0.0,0.0,0.04835289578362605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057819282587069275,0.0,0.0532502299050912,0.0,0.16760584387820998,0.0,0.07703858427433448,0.0,0.0,0.06950616908607002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04908583132290153,0.1652769811660633,0.0,0.0,0.08043377379745968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282014975916627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18562242900496292,0.07447827969388525,0.0,0.0,0.08205807924751325,0.061861615640696185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05772366956912205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435651727983465,0.0,0.08142329364116142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11153254966522236,0.07164298725608488,0.0,0.10254391123109848,0.0,0.057849042438365784,0.060561371846745864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054464325265531285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057507642887135675,0.08447830526658992,0.0,0.0,0.0692175678739444,0.1609624611307179,0.14754184438611714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4379419316347695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0651304187458092,0.0,0.06536398512843115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273569215180295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994299931518425
mentalhealth,blazesh,2020/04/16,Ways to volunteer during covid? What are some ways we could volunteer to help out during covid? Are there online platforms where we could maybe receive some training and then help by just listening to people who need help?,6.92923076923077,9.21179064102564,5.213333333333335,80.84000000000002,65.66666666666667,8.276923076923078,28.384615384615394,8.841846274778883,2.350907692307692,181,6,29,3,3,52,27,39,0.0,0.8059999999999999,0.19399999999999998,0.8243,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,10,6,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,5,4,2,7,0,0,0,0,8,3,0,2,1,20,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.478145253531021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6021102329546238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30082036957706737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22202553519173185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20758891548151887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4753514416057164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowawayProse,2020/04/16,"My parents hold my symptoms against me. They know I have depression and anxiety, yet they still expect things of me. They compare me to my younger brother who can juggle a bunch of responsibilities with no problem. They get on me about my chores that I don’t always complete. I tell them that I am busy with schoolwork and that I’m tired all the time; they don’t care. They just say, “We’re all stressed.”

If I need to get my hair done, my mom (a hairstylist), will hold it against me. She says the reason she doesn’t do my hair as much anymore is because I don’t do my housework every single week. I keep trying to tell her that I don’t have time, but she does not want to hear it. As a result, I feel self conscious about my looks, and she’s not helping.

Sometimes I really wanna bring up my depression when my parents get on me about this stuff, but then I’ll just look like I’m using my mental issues as an excuse, or a crutch. So I don’t say anything, and they go on thinking I’m selfish and lazy.",4.302118171683389,4.525423009661836,4.9852173913043485,87.68177257525086,70.1111111111111,7.528651059085842,28.483463396506878,7.010146845296331,1.2759858045336312,781,26,171,6,13,252,116,207,0.134,0.8320000000000001,0.034,-0.9525,2,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,8,0,9,7,0,1,7,0,15,4,2,3,2,32,34,15,0,6,8,4,3,1,0,1,2,4,1,1,10,7,0,3,5,0,0,2,9,5,0,0,1,9,42,2,21,32,5,13,0,2,2,0,27,4,0,2,8,119,52,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11471455292107235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546619023645988,0.0,0.13672483050480827,0.0,0.0,0.11345097881280633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404109895027836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1405623459284265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454861376685435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2374854905169325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206464104886107,0.14108355013555213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161570352019479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06970858233827787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21608599448314247,0.0,0.07835173965860147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538364280974434,0.0,0.0924078655098988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438950267822423,0.0,0.12254056361982235,0.0,0.0,0.07576688543514704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06735377464298194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315434100417208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893528644218964,0.0,0.0,0.16146558076742654,0.0,0.0,0.1013464866885105,0.10222499804603244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3061650775968401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319179890347645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831971741610194,0.14174796982158824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32890685358757005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14382304758044034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13635180669106814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11009900276247224,0.0,0.15792365599850794,0.0,0.15782220553487286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14329430869602086,0.0,0.0,0.24099981359456255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09159124333263204,0.0883381934087292,0.0,0.0,0.16078014039428248,0.15845530024144347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936011456021043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190709175578608,0.0,0.0,0.08131622759285302,0.0,0.11058682205830572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MyMentalHealthStory,2020/04/16,"Helping you out by sharing my mental health story I want to help people out. I found when I struggled the most with my mental health, I always felt so alone and wasn't sure if anyone else was experiencing the same things I was. If this is you too, please check out my youtube channel! I have videos about my story with: anxiety, depression, panic attacks, weight gain, break-ups, coping with a suicidal parent, sex education, COVID-19 in Ottawa etc. I really want to help people in need.

It would mean a lot to me if you'd check out my content. If you like it and would want to subscribe, that would be even better :). Take care guys. My channel is called 'My Mental Health Story'.

[https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjS\_3-fzhC-F9D2Ejz-xHBw?view\_as=subscriber](https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCjS_3-fzhC-F9D2Ejz-xHBw?view_as=subscriber)",9.851846153846154,12.860313569230776,6.3630769230769255,72.59692307692309,59.46153846153847,7.353846153846155,25.30769230769231,7.908726449838941,1.421446153846154,684,16,100,7,10,186,82,130,0.153,0.654,0.193,0.4894,1,1,0,0,0,0,54.0,0,4,0,2,5,9,1,2,4,0,11,5,0,0,1,27,20,8,1,11,4,1,2,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,5,9,1,0,3,3,2,0,1,4,0,0,5,3,19,5,15,10,4,7,0,1,0,1,11,6,0,6,2,67,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13392072738192234,0.0,0.0,0.10759191251990556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09891778178777592,0.0,0.0,0.09041288947707027,0.13248799952916704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471028230802132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435954580242715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13203460950451826,0.0,0.13183481294765956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11136999391012316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801752874266456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14420897927508206,0.08540456956548224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12415284015318225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14177598708225342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280320343012879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41233471623389706,0.0,0.0,0.2600107500466721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317177066678842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10993027664707794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14085078252790098,0.0,0.0,0.39092633334240656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09587783561065398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15171126686698574,0.14357762553506967,0.0,0.0,0.1792872688805229,0.0,0.0,0.14193778882538205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08283593552906983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13517740245023088,0.0,0.14143841229298815,0.0,0.12186819903143285,0.0,0.0972210817521241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590433200758894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288018796962554,0.0,0.0,0.1574583537181829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755631588578005,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cubonette-v2,2020/04/16,"struggling with school and motivation I definitely have an aversion towards school, I always have I never learned how to actually do schoolwork on my own because I was either had private tutoring every day or my father tutoring me. My father was very strict and abusive because of school up until I got diagnosed with MDD at 15 (currently 20). I barely graduated high school and it was only because I got pity passed by the committee. I have been to therapy for the past 5 years but it was always focused on my family situation as it is dysfunctional.

Now I am in my first year of fine arts and I am struggling. I always thought it was because I was not interested in the subjects that I was so miserable at school but only now do I realise that I have school-related trauma. I can NEVER start working, I will make a to-do list and all that shit but I just can not start. I love my school but I'm failing because I have given up before I even started. All the work then snowballs and paralyzes me with anxiety which makes me work even less!

Basically, I am looking for any type of advice you guys may have used or heard in regards to finding motivation when you are severely depressed and anxious about school.

Thank you!",5.467243589743589,6.625258149572653,6.553066239316242,74.12908653846156,67.93162393162393,9.43974358974359,34.28311965811966,9.673873057562805,3.4529068376068377,973,46,172,21,16,326,130,234,0.204,0.735,0.061,-0.99,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,3,0,7,9,12,1,3,6,0,26,3,1,6,4,34,41,19,0,0,10,2,0,0,0,2,1,1,0,1,8,10,0,0,5,1,0,1,4,8,0,1,14,2,34,4,25,25,5,28,0,4,1,1,8,11,1,3,16,131,42,18,0.0,0.10344084698901217,0.08519601391983163,0.0,0.0,0.08531236192316226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2179315189288734,0.0,0.0,0.05936964665551011,0.0,0.06678724552553009,0.0986285583901309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660982395042098,0.0,0.07428918976158523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05630379386047073,0.0,0.07519472225337924,0.08861162207662028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11532680683862563,0.0,0.07355730222317489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08230234828793177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0797941841354912,0.07426065383801779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396498104494804,0.0,0.0,0.08644458817686418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09224136502963222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07331328903416152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879517948606553,0.0,0.11655206407389855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13466830157921394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327971019909475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08334145242360443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7068496723062128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986285583901309,0.08961620008336682,0.0,0.09813324293998292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18538245205123394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18253798667496285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08037770265873259,0.09983961973550724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930954568381875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07540253979078343,0.0,0.07203486176841296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1906748397706015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11244170011978363
mentalhealth,themagicalworldofmei,2020/04/16,"Traumatic nightmares since I was a toddler I've been having traumatic nightmares since i was a toddler and they cause me to wake up every night at random times. They drain me daily as i have one after the other during my sleep. I look really tired even when I've had 10 hours of sleep. I can remember having them since i was 3, even my grandparents recall it when they babysat me. Is this a sleep disorder? Im also diagnosed with aspergers and adhd.",4.016850649350648,5.765965295454548,5.269675324675326,79.6727272727273,72.18181818181819,8.664935064935065,26.20779220779221,9.23628265651192,2.339329220779221,358,12,65,8,7,119,59,88,0.156,0.8440000000000001,0.0,-0.9229999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,4,0,5,0,0,0,4,0,10,6,4,1,0,6,11,6,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,1,15,0,7,6,0,8,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,6,47,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21709554283491844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14445865203096458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18556820763642015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1833469516345151,0.0,0.0,0.2070303930676344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386235347020412,0.0,0.15219794894868766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17789513260314904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1951234261832456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15169305948480294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16951947015042376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240710949099895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572333797163742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20463119438674066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4482846457726442,0.0,0.5423147817411433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1053332996884268,0.2076204136483656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,insularium,2020/04/16,"How to go back to therapy after a traumatic experience with mental healthcare? I am looking for general advice on how to move past this and be brave enough to seek help once more. 

I was in counseling for about a year and things were going really well. One day I had to meet with a different counselor than my normal one and she Baker Acted me because I USED TO BE suicidal (I haven’t been for a while but sometimes I would talk to my therapist to process those times) and she twisted my words a lot to make it seem like I still was.

For those who don’t know, the Baker Act is forced hospitalization by pretty much any means necessary. Basically I got handcuffed by police while people I knew looked on and got sent to a facility in my city which is notoriously the worst one. I spent 12 hours locked in an empty waiting room and they didn’t give me a place to sleep that night, I had to sit on a couch with all the lights on outside the patient area. They didn’t let me sleep at all because they wanted me to eat breakfast, which was meat based and I am a vegetarian. I finally got a place to sleep and slept through the next two meals, so the staff started calling me lazy and said I was faking being vegetarian to make things more complicated for them. I told them I wasn’t suicidal and a staff member said that if that was the case I should have kept my problems to myself. They ended up billing me for thousands of dollars which wiped out all my savings. A lot of other scary shit happened there and I was almost sexually assaulted but moving on ...

I didn’t want to meet with my therapist again afterwards, but she urged me to come in. She was sympathetic, but some of the stuff she said made me feel really attacked and I never went back. I later found out that the hospital I was sent to broke a lot of the requirements around the Baker Act laws while I was there, but there’s no way for me to press charges because if I do that information will become public and could wreck my future career opportunities. 

About a year has passed since then and I am still struggling with my mental health and I want to go back to therapy, but I am terrified that something like this will happen again. How can I seek mental healthcare after an experience like this? I don’t want to struggle alone anymore.",5.682884067152357,6.155480334811532,6.154756889452012,79.62460920177385,67.15964523281596,9.280994615140957,29.410912258473235,9.23628265651192,2.2991120684193853,1825,60,361,32,28,591,222,451,0.166,0.768,0.067,-0.995,1,1,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,6,2,18,16,3,2,27,0,39,9,5,7,4,71,77,31,2,11,8,0,2,3,0,4,1,3,2,0,20,24,3,3,7,0,3,13,9,9,1,5,33,8,59,7,61,35,12,61,0,1,2,0,26,18,1,8,31,267,79,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850933378380011,0.0,0.0,0.08045097036353613,0.08321014701374924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05463535765311213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967773759896768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152146927067962,0.0,0.09140069482847203,0.0,0.18533426088975305,0.0,0.1469273270619341,0.08873149604877104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08203822875335573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920757300613653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414659953804328,0.0,0.0,0.05181398388040458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08394035553963608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220998751548654,0.0,0.0,0.07115922072603073,0.08301482751121646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571799074222924,0.0,0.0,0.04062336088798448,0.0,0.0,0.08801080255115153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08809092482368189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07707142734814698,0.1369807370736758,0.0,0.19277066068040727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420924413467376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08539985563958995,0.0,0.0,0.05385159106062652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912074804050953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0441538965095326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215520240751123,0.0,0.1177532207388208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13493419593177408,0.0,0.0,0.20491184583351327,0.0,0.07602160227534631,0.10725790137905236,0.0,0.0,0.08751605931562725,0.0,0.0,0.24289770750870796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17078179575669428,0.0590606603287062,0.0,0.06196475165171506,0.0,0.08544469509597102,0.07539558328250141,0.07871816316824573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556167464785769,0.1633255827748199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07669558969946902,0.055699070236888935,0.0,0.16788071107927216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173676121451873,0.0,0.07687650352966294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10293836522763383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2292710992005464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07314039640559251,0.0,0.0,0.08246997277039016,0.06645978446138891,0.0,0.24120025419979016,0.0,0.0,0.061851244990986015,0.07946035430845917,0.0,0.0568665254665677,0.0,0.12832255003904025,0.0,0.0,0.16798193604104955,0.09197244007156193,0.17576235300346055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457590666001654,0.0,0.0,0.18375630105569754,0.1865666542161708,0.1067513929353748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04684810282873345,0.0,0.0,0.07677028385170112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07848252105706419,0.0,0.0,0.06938974646971605,0.0,0.0,0.18955132058337928,0.06377178972149973,0.0,0.0,0.07223716302199218,0.07447789699521827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057072696184757875,0.0,0.0,0.10347530846552884
mentalhealth,that-crow,2020/04/16,"Where do I begin to seek help? I recently I lost my father due to negligence while hospitalized, it has left me disheveled and tore at me knowing the people responsible for taking care of him left him to die. He died 8 days after hospitals in my state stopped allowing visitors. He was 58 and dies of completely unrelated causes of what brought him to the hospital This has destroyed my faith in healthcare.

I am 29, I have very good health insurance and live in Ohio. I feel myself losing touch with reality, I am confusing my dreams for real life and am just very disassociated from where I was a few weeks ago. I don't feel suicidal but I have been down that path before and do not want to head there. I've never really grieved before and never lost anyone close besides aunts and uncles (which never felt this way). I always assumed I may have been a sociopath because I never cried over death until now. Today was my first day back at work, my dad and I worked together in the same industry for years but I took a new job in October and am now feeling so angry I didn't stay to see him more. I don't know if any of this is normal but I feel like I'm losing my mind.

Sorry to unpack all this, I don't really have friends and with all that is going on, I don't socialize much to begin with but was close with my dad. What I'm asking for advice on is, where do I begin to seek help with this? I don't have a GP and haven't been to one since I was a child and had a pediatrician. Do I seek a GP then go from there? I know that's not what I need but everyone is telling me that I have to be refereed to a therapist or psychiatrist by a GP. Please, any help would be appreciated. Thank you.",4.068407046476761,4.63107857183908,5.671214392803602,81.35174662668669,70.75287356321839,9.155622188905546,26.337331334332838,9.318704503766252,1.9598086956521736,1325,39,282,27,23,453,180,348,0.091,0.773,0.136,0.9496,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,0,7,10,13,1,1,12,0,40,3,1,2,6,56,66,23,6,5,10,4,6,1,1,2,2,0,0,1,14,19,0,1,9,1,0,4,13,7,0,2,15,7,44,6,41,47,6,50,1,5,1,0,19,18,0,5,26,196,58,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09761225876511732,0.08854728061432089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311725420644933,0.0,0.0,0.1358585129163524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984605945000683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338453341282102,0.0,0.0,0.07680995774689775,0.0,0.06089258256575133,0.0,0.16999964485779812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10184545849580492,0.102615499297078,0.0,0.0,0.10473373752252586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10972549391124307,0.12884276960274724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110130376173645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954500624529569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020314183700236,0.07136209893527119,0.09591095588672202,0.0,0.0,0.084967172342879,0.0,0.0,0.07717548319661198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354063276003462,0.08378377112859033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10251691067998628,0.10617938537284356,0.0,0.0,0.2008643503203876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09912633263490164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16469232499586076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21706357113712046,0.0,0.07055591658487559,0.04880166174396748,0.0,0.08820551952660753,0.0,0.0,0.2235047946848117,0.2180854957941852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10086136159561992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734313256907798,0.0740678574120571,0.30816816707169736,0.09647528073963776,0.0,0.0,0.09787190060551812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768867802259097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06925179204694155,0.0,0.0,0.10965024228115616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369774499183065,0.12798537268356364,0.0,0.09863024048651092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07960013670836558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08263080790092793,0.0,0.0,0.10182622155324647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11181971572551573,0.0,0.10647043835639194,0.0,0.08351328864279015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10926446229811104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510554629022208,0.0,0.08730907395868229,0.09196614574961992,0.0,0.11598106652160126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946849198215045,0.0,0.1109824964919932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1648409540783969,0.058918257429769465,0.07928876912077619,0.08012647712821379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14544357058475355,0.0,0.0,0.07095964925331015,0.0,0.0,0.06432648259092537
mentalhealth,lemonpepperedchicken,2020/04/16,does my lack of presence on social media make people think i'm weird? I just don't enjoy my business being out there for everyone to see and judge. I have accounts on most social media platforms but don't follow many people or post (maybe 3 times a year).,5.817647058823527,5.862880568627451,6.310588235294119,80.09764705882355,66.84313725490196,7.584313725490197,26.803921568627448,6.42735559955562,1.2460274509803924,203,5,37,1,3,66,42,51,0.105,0.895,0.0,-0.4242,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,0,9,9,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,4,1,6,8,2,8,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,2,2,22,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431026777531849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2654476490794315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18543215120359405,0.2816433102581415,0.2790851723254881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38517995527678855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2660534482894304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2213688353116676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5663596320698537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17800157732474042,0.0,0.0,0.16198609847191806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17889263912976258
mentalhealth,_pretty_in_pink,2020/04/16,"Intrusive Thoughts Lately, I have been suffering through intrusive thoughts. Terrible thoughts of death, either about me or my family. I notice I only have these thoughts when my family goes somewhere by vehicle or myself goes somewhere through vehicle transport. Back in 2018, my family and I survived a horrific car accident. My family walked away almost injure-free, but I broke my arm very badly and I have two plates and 11 screws in my arm, with pain on the daily. 
Could it be PTSD that I am suffering from? How can I not have these thoughts? They haunt me and make me feel like there’s something wrong with me. Any advice? 
Thank you.",3.6007692307692314,6.54184018803419,3.8550427350427365,83.45384615384617,78.74358974358975,8.044444444444443,26.948717948717945,8.841846274778883,2.620312820512821,510,21,89,13,13,158,78,117,0.27899999999999997,0.659,0.063,-0.9832,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,1,1,5,10,1,0,2,0,9,4,2,2,0,21,17,9,1,1,5,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,6,0,0,3,1,8,0,1,6,1,21,2,12,9,1,10,0,3,0,1,2,4,1,3,4,62,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319227237486395,0.0,0.0,0.1467336010370609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996488014521509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13767442374278854,0.112676343421796,0.12235057544018108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699624630960938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5525604968598018,0.0,0.07409248145033881,0.1046846086470547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16529782372118138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158958238640213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978132273477188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16683102947252276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11144644439692647,0.15592353479726925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712915330856426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11280977550851685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13490970865794594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5816619725447391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14314336895045765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12090669293763615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1602129813526134,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,XxilpearlxX,2020/04/16,"Trying to work with school at home sucks. (Rant) Highschool was always difficult, not only for classes and getting help, but because I was too anxious to be around others. Now with Zoom and everything happening, I can't get out of bed and be able to focus on my school work because of home life. I missed a week of school online because of my parents constantly fighting, and when they weren't fighting my neighbors are making a racket (I live in a trailer park, you can hear everything.) When. I actually tried showing up for my classes and doing my work it never helped. My teachers for my college classes are counting everything as a normal grade, not taking in the fact that it's hard to learn anything at home. I ask for help, but with the groans of other students understanding everything already and just sending videos as if it will help me learn just makes me panic. They're not just participation grades, we're being forced to take tests that count as if we were in school.

 I was already anxious in school but now it's even worse. I have to have my camera on and feel embarrassed for what other students have to hear or see anything because my teacher insists that we have to have it on or makes a snide comment about it. I stopped participating and joining after what I heard about Zoom too, (I've been using my school account that's connected to my school data which has all my information about me, which is scary since the hacker problems).

I really don't know what to do, I'm getting less sleep at night then I do in school too because of chronic nightmares, so it's hard to focus on work with that alone. I almost had a panic attack because one of my teachers tried to call me and ask where I am. I'm too embarrassed with not being able to understand my homework and being able to ask for help without looking an idiot. I just don't know what to do.",7.959661434287478,6.894840997229919,7.659921514312098,75.86586872883966,62.85041551246538,9.905878731917516,36.3990458602647,8.680891452615391,3.027319359803016,1484,59,274,17,18,472,168,361,0.152,0.805,0.043,-0.9902,1,1,0,0,4,0,34.0,2,1,1,4,19,12,5,4,10,0,31,3,1,4,3,54,58,24,0,4,16,1,3,0,1,1,2,3,6,0,21,19,0,1,8,2,1,1,10,12,0,1,8,8,37,0,56,44,2,28,0,1,2,0,23,16,1,5,11,196,58,25,0.2088818902128659,0.0,0.06794619775761558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06972168004055262,0.07211288092616326,0.15367090668476022,0.0,0.05793548861214937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573180533828809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11459466516979555,0.06198305594062398,0.19527637036653606,0.07921110176196537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2546649230043056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07109725476757721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524237222303849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04598817282452429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503060988550547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03520565329672752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10913216635413832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06157118855740041,0.0,0.12474476336413486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569500475621795,0.0,0.23334854661401605,0.0,0.20952556707181336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765306827517548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049179818809578106,0.0,0.0,0.061482178650530676,0.0,0.05846939317681886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13943028371154767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370086363074279,0.0,0.0,0.06534050130582353,0.068219967527999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047181258238015486,0.0529546966951162,0.0,0.16338526136489806,0.07731287319209537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06662391960608273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04460502919894911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5637323321794984,0.05548394082338698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0575964193699923,0.0,0.06967758073862369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058211537776618326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470212384539504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14181709208715512,0.0,0.0,0.14496894288473772,0.0,0.060135628937663964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055850817589124316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06711822939918928,0.0,0.20275800512836256,0.0,0.07095616380201222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,you_had_one_job_,2020/04/16,"Should I confront an ex-friend about some very hurtful things she said to me?  tw // suicide

I had a friend (who will be referred to as Rachel). Rachel and I had been friends for a couple of years, but at the time this incident happened, our relationship was extremely tentative (and we'd had problems in the past, most of them unfortunately caused by me). We'd stopped officially being friends, but somehow we ended up talking from time to time anyway.

Anyway, I have been struggling with my mental health recently, and a few months back I attempted suicide. While in hospital, I messaged Rachel and we had a fairly normal conversation which ended because she was going to bed. The last message she sent me included her stating that my attempted suicide was a **shitty thing to do** and that **she was annoyed about i**t. Then the next day, we had a major argument and one of the things she said was that **she didn't think I had actually intended to take my own life.**

After this, we decided that it was better if we didn't speak at all, and see if things were any better in the future. However, we eventually concluded that it was best if we went our separate ways permanently, and that's how it's been apart from a couple of occasions.

The problem is, I never confronted her about the things she said to me, despite the fact that they really affected me. I strongly believe that it would help me if I could make it clear that she'd said some unacceptable things that were negatively impacting my mental health, but I don't know if I should as she doesn't want to speak to me.

(Also, we have not been speaking since around February, it hasn't been years or anything.)",3.8872857142857136,6.152592593650796,4.71813492063492,81.27339285714288,73.85714285714286,8.182539682539682,28.075396825396822,8.942964678507748,2.436730158730158,1317,53,244,29,28,425,164,315,0.145,0.757,0.098,-0.9454,1,0,0,0,0,3,51.0,12,0,2,7,10,14,3,1,17,0,39,3,0,6,4,56,53,23,3,13,10,0,0,0,3,4,3,7,1,0,26,18,0,1,6,0,0,3,8,7,0,1,28,8,48,7,31,15,8,33,0,1,1,0,43,8,0,10,20,194,74,0,0.0,0.0,0.09417375544637062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717402735010644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06562587059923441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07941437732584147,0.08590881233404687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742054397567877,0.0,0.05882780045404438,0.0,0.0,0.1087266982023372,0.1012747493239681,0.1706994786704259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913595156885184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07705040511297444,0.21355916460631091,0.0,0.062236945952756285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1709473868903226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29823428300367577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054845314535813504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533796216870873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20515798252774103,0.0,0.0,0.06468444059515109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033092781719418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05303594637714465,0.07866345003235962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06816346436325678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441701362456614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945061977755006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07702838586629471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442965413401142,0.0,0.10263285067815103,0.0,0.0945532016590442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539344984114172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09212376492720972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846821431934699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061822784056952435,0.0,0.09528582729776164,0.10360892989047024,0.0,0.0,0.3671887250208747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0769010076611226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07982891304213291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068147009915626,0.0,0.10088669015064868,0.0,0.31667837266637805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255882250325542,0.0775660721616433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3846768869096556,0.0618357170388035,0.0,0.0,0.16881636724581578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07962571420506949,0.05692042191568902,0.07660019811193346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08945995854449931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855350702288288,0.0,0.0,0.12429052348644876
mentalhealth,memyselfandilikedogs,2020/04/16,"What should I do? Way before me and 3 of my other friends applied for a stay at home call center job. All three of them got interviewed already but wasn’t offered the job and was told that they’ll be contacted again( they couldn’t do a full time job since we still have our final exam). A month later and almost done our finals, I was contacted, but I did not do even just the interview because even before I really don’t want a call center job because I get anxiety when talking through phone. Now I can’t stop thinking about if and I’m getting anxiety because in my mind I think that what if they get called and got the job. They’ll be earning money while I just stay at home jobless. What should I do?",4.788541666666667,5.09358132638889,5.400000000000002,84.84500000000001,69.06944444444444,8.344444444444445,29.19444444444445,8.167268648758528,1.8406861111111112,557,19,115,7,9,180,85,144,0.055999999999999994,0.9129999999999999,0.03,-0.5175,6,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,3,0,5,1,9,1,0,0,7,0,19,0,0,0,1,23,29,11,0,6,7,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,2,0,6,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,8,0,20,1,8,14,2,20,0,0,0,0,20,6,0,3,11,80,26,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11548367092574276,0.0,0.12726658629081644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17645019721333113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109074261223564,0.0,0.1962701423169114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3532863222111266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11801990850888384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234523935322697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25267092525547424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910161596540896,0.0,0.18076132387120306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18447561656960212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23136544830032044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5722229428737888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11644773617738363,0.0,0.09205318163652346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07388164643549168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09539996651194503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2458471969895344,0.0921005618334802,0.09641881935097373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269574649949627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477942041282828,0.0,0.0,0.06724829876037078,0.0,0.0,0.11020021457968697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06802305252154077,0.09154147358651746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jacobeelackobee,2020/04/16,"Why do I feel conflict asking for help? Why do I not even feel content or at home in approaching someone when I feel at home in my sadness and at peace with it and know and just feel I want and can feel better and I feel at home in myself and I love myself and feel okay in myself right now to do so? What is happening to me? Can anyone relate to this at all?

I don’t feel sure why, I then, want to go back in, to feeling dull and lifeless and emotionless again and in pain, as a result.",2.891428571428573,3.226178523809523,4.307619047619049,90.8957142857143,73.28571428571428,7.142857142857142,23.57142857142857,6.868970318607317,0.5569999999999999,375,9,88,3,7,125,58,105,0.09699999999999999,0.708,0.195,0.8541,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,1,7,7,0,0,1,1,7,2,0,1,2,30,23,15,0,2,3,0,9,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,3,11,0,1,10,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,9,13,4,19,23,1,19,0,2,0,1,3,12,0,1,5,64,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10114043258150142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13522526797026727,0.0,0.0,0.11122449017540567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279283739207878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553787253398713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6582400885930306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08220613162254904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791072145023527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09695372672215588,0.0,0.4352777179449799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07949411951606264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13054941900136072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1539144343658092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12352760961482336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12255879673803703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13632793332076387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17063290585950333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3915638197057811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoWrapX,2020/04/16,"Looking Out for Yourself First Isn't a Negative I was watching an interview with app developer Trey Hope and he said ""I'm more important than anything I'm working on."" I think this is super important, especially in a time when we're stuck working at home, whether professionally or on personal projects. Do you guys agree with him? I think he's right that your health is always more important than your work.",4.449887218045113,7.0049837631578935,5.102180451127823,77.82026315789476,73.21052631578948,9.079699248120301,33.22556390977444,9.606745405546679,3.594393233082707,330,17,59,9,7,106,58,76,0.025,0.738,0.23600000000000002,0.9390000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,0,5,1,2,0,0,3,0,5,1,0,0,0,9,13,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,2,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,3,7,2,10,10,2,9,0,0,2,0,10,6,0,2,3,35,9,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20769532908304456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20540757714961988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123179475729205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24715292139135386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2653235191344542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2503789568176465,0.24791882817392216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.209609345636876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21794962811578447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21316538447837396,0.2374360566151952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3198797307478734,0.0,0.0,0.14554946743411168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5451566683239185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,springtimecool,2020/04/16,"Is it possible for a mental health professional such as a therapist, psychologist, psychiatrist, etc. to also have a mental illness? Is it possible that someone dealing with mental issues can also be the very people we look to for help us with our mental issues?",7.841231884057972,9.24021167391304,9.11608695652174,57.015144927536255,62.69565217391305,11.35072463768116,34.89855072463768,11.20814326018867,4.7598202898550745,211,9,28,6,3,73,33,46,0.057999999999999996,0.884,0.057999999999999996,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,0,5,2,0,0,0,3,6,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,7,5,1,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,26,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2611316607089336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16832274450721016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18208763305019104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17354687362020088,0.0,0.0,0.10943549257842942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34081997346457765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13710449316941878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6581453396603995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131898810691066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36812160146929057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13833694427531187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18956741389377468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19639200790824995,0.0,0.0,0.13471368347265633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I-like-tetris,2020/04/16,"Auditory hallucinations. Back in 2016, I started experiencing auditory hallucinations, after messing about trying to contact spirits.  I did successfully contact something, but then after some bad event with these entities, I began hearing voices.  They didn't really last long, a few days to a week at most.

Now they've come back, and it's difficult not to believe that they're some sort of demon-like entity.  They've told me things before I knew about them, and they seem more able to communicate in sophisticated language, than what I thought was possible with hallucinations.  You really can have a conversation with them, and there are a few of them.  

I can easily win them with logical argument, but they're relentless and totally evil.  Well except at least one of them, she has been nice to me, but I've had a real horrible experience with some of the others.

Their intelligence level ranges from mostly average, rarely above average, and some are totally stupid.

It's a nightmare, and I don't want to deal with it.  I now wish I'd never contacted what I thought were spirits.

Someone help me :(",7.210425614994142,8.541907121827414,7.990050761421317,64.76856696602891,64.07614213197971,11.746817649355721,34.443186255369,11.51311941424646,4.520550488090589,881,38,144,28,13,295,121,197,0.14800000000000002,0.696,0.156,-0.0373,0,0,1,0,0,0,30.0,0,1,8,2,8,9,2,0,7,0,13,0,0,0,3,36,24,10,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,9,13,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,5,1,1,11,4,22,4,27,13,12,21,2,0,0,0,18,5,0,8,15,109,31,1,0.18979239830184444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2918772782170517,0.15846872494826691,0.0,0.0,0.1614993520842145,0.2138310401827525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16348934576960242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12240039577132633,0.1956676288929582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18565338384513733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21390982657753524,0.0,0.12721384392967153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15470613586996482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1679603000786578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463795979006015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860824095520454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21396241225347054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2160253001113796,0.24317174052854046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17277987131002892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1608104831815411,0.14611146063040073,0.0,0.0,0.13433603637415856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608963609698232,0.0,0.0,0.3013479284701016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18135476995195896,0.0,0.1288565801467304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1119444738699082,0.0,0.15224001381675314,0.0,0.17064615922408438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21825189150665072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Jasjazjas,2020/04/16,"Falling into ""The Slump"" again I've been dealing with depression and anxiety for a few years now and been on anti-depressants for the last year or so, but typically have it managed and under control so that it doesn't affect my day to day life toooo much.

However, I feel myself falling back into the slump again. This happens every so often with no real trigger - or not one that I seem to have identified as of yet.

You know when you just feel yourself feeling more drained than normal, mentally exhausted, quiet, and have no desire to do anything? I can't even bring myself to watch TV.

I'm a people pleaser, and forcing myself into work during this pandemic. Every single ounce of energy that I seem to be able to summon is going into dragging myself into work and putting my all in. It means when I come home I physically cannot muster anything inside myself to do anything and it makes me feel really low.

My mind is just constantly unfocused and I keep feeling really emotional, and then really distant.

It comes and goes, normally I just power through stages like this, but I'm wondering:

​

When you feel yourself getting into ""the slump"", what do you do?

I want to try and be proactive with this and cope a bit better.  I just want to hear others thoughts and opinions and feel a bit more normal and reassured I guess.",6.275595238095237,7.076677869047625,6.8009126984126995,74.35589285714286,65.94444444444444,9.474603174603176,32.41666666666667,9.516144504307137,3.1330428571428577,1061,42,179,20,16,347,141,252,0.1,0.775,0.125,0.7734,2,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,4,0,5,17,6,0,0,8,0,16,2,0,4,1,65,43,27,0,6,9,0,7,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,14,26,0,2,13,1,0,7,6,3,0,1,3,10,24,3,28,38,8,33,0,2,1,0,7,10,0,8,16,137,38,3,0.1091050952700712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11821532514149485,0.13257463290091992,0.0,0.0,0.08346509924782633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2693525911520145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0838950836070736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09649459043485624,0.2382290121259803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18796875749960676,0.0,0.11790384769174872,0.12237064173994207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14072752081973347,0.1124825624347868,0.18794411736570024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272854703448292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07206288643122166,0.0,0.18385149685841665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.386167700869011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05700290913187135,0.0,0.06200693996988864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12019156305718802,0.0,0.09648127542221344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296937188616358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944130644159517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969776217523524,0.0,0.0,0.059961307015687124,0.08893521470819127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0770641554102524,0.05330323843772244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282849830772194,0.0,0.0,0.11884743400380272,0.0,0.0,0.10995227423995536,0.0,0.11016504385630356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08020479881666172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3206994844785513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393243621705951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563973544761504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10968075577594273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12418548456252235,0.2096865534769229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19865036206614128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0866172584870316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07407519784183031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287060240116649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183198217086267,0.1588596175840499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13257463290091992,0.14052020840572882
mentalhealth,SheilaMcmahon03,2020/04/16,"OMHS - Anxiety (Coronaviris Special) Good Afternoon folks, I have launched my latest Online Mental Health Show on Anxiety – Coronavirus special.
I've created this in the hope of helping as many people as possible during this difficult time.
Please spread the word. Together we can make a difference!
Check out the link below for the video 

https://youtu.be/nwRF6v_zRHE",7.513533834586468,11.615409877192988,6.217293233082707,64.99105263157898,73.03508771929825,10.976441102756894,34.45864661654135,10.290406445055957,5.511222556390978,301,15,37,11,7,90,49,57,0.094,0.6559999999999999,0.25,0.8597,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,1,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,5,0,2,1,0,2,0,7,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,4,8,4,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,3,20,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4329704029906391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29566244222212706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23735707923967675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3008032277382432,0.0,0.0,0.1896810280129668,0.0,0.0,0.2810711390195586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888968236164809,0.2869056221117863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2851855501067444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19618838912308675,0.0,0.0,0.310636068240869,0.0,0.3190266802629528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501269748942407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Anya_at_CityArts,2020/04/16,"The Institute of Mental Health in Nottingham, UK is putting together an exhibition of work by young artists affected by mental illness It's free to enter, and you have the opportunity to put your work up for sale - there are two age categories, 13-17 and 18-25. [The exhibition callout](https://city-arts.org.uk/call-for-submissions-exhibition-for-young-artists-exploring-mental-health/)",10.219285714285714,11.99988644444445,9.282658730158731,56.56303571428572,57.57142857142857,13.919047619047621,44.32142857142857,13.023866798666859,6.814114285714287,318,18,45,12,4,100,48,63,0.078,0.812,0.11,0.4215,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,2,0,3,1,2,0,0,4,0,3,2,0,1,0,3,3,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,3,9,3,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,23,3,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21860273802572106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4551205591223116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6472361084392909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4304252066320896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20912804007282715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117100317205655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HeyHoney86,2020/04/16,"Having cancer treatment and struggling with no contact My bf (33M) of 4 years and I (34F) broke up at the end of January and i was diagnosed with stage II breast cancer in March. The break up was his call, and he struggled with co-dependency issues in the relationship and has asked for no contact.

I am really struggling. I've started chemo and have my lumpectomy scheduled for the end of the month, but I live on my own and not allowed to leave the house OR take anyone to the hospital with me because of corona virus.

Also, I had lymphoma in 2015 and I can feel a distinct difference with the support (and attention, I guess) that i've received from my friends this time around. My cancer support therapist says that's not uncommon with second cancers ...although I'm sure this is also feeling amplified by being stuck in the house 24/7 with nothing to do but think. This is really hard.

I'm the most lonely I've ever been at a time where i really need to stay positive. I miss him and i miss his friendship. I have reached out to him and asked for some contact during this time. I know it's selfish. I just feel like i need *one* thing to feel ""ok"" at the moment :( Nothing feels certain like he always did.

Any advice?",3.463828451882847,5.341084535564857,4.474684100418411,84.2655826359833,73.93723849372384,7.290460251046027,27.849581589958163,8.07648339933343,1.8958433472803355,960,38,183,15,20,312,137,239,0.168,0.7040000000000001,0.129,-0.7452,1,2,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,0,0,0,6,16,0,3,13,1,15,6,1,1,4,44,36,17,0,2,6,0,6,2,2,0,5,1,0,0,8,20,0,0,8,0,0,1,4,8,0,2,6,7,24,8,34,29,3,29,0,4,0,1,17,13,0,4,14,123,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149758887011277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18818515276545825,0.09790245907309293,0.0,0.0,0.08001276406152262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08227053506527553,0.0,0.0,0.10474225285431728,0.219992239825439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172438056833484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12014390905874428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194223177959136,0.0,0.12292954876722866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20842348923213788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643011215703292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.297461893702021,0.08405625326634396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09090374384042403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12961564062182934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10540015612536648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2715274455036218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280636250278468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646628018113263,0.0,0.0,0.12458484119678084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114965363983763,0.0,0.1038958438644444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09391500650707807,0.0,0.0,0.17448664415463672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257956871799784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07972939064322793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261278268405831,0.0,0.0,0.1263226953988744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09356787188216686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328028003484426,0.12540979406983488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36901101024323607,0.0,0.0,0.2670381114686759,0.1108930596040758,0.0,0.0884655988945098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366122079800812,0.07816800679157354,0.07539171050720625,0.0,0.0,0.20582529479342845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07576911544180241
mentalhealth,im_a_treee,2020/04/16,"im so scared all the time ((trigger warning)) hey reddit. so like most places my country is in quarantine and we currently cant go out unless it is essential. i suffer from PTSD ( not really comfortable talking about my trauma) and im having a really hard time dealing with my pts during this hard time. part of me feels like its all my fault and i should just all be over it by now and that im just dragging it out. another part of me knows that i didnt ask for this and that i didnt do this on purpose. i cant even leave for therapy as im currently doing over the phone therapy. i dont really have space as i live with my family ( 3 other people). im having more flashbacks, nightmares and im getting s\*lf h\*rm urges again, im currently a month clean. does anyone have any advice or ideas? tips to avoid s\*lf h\*rm would be wonderful",2.7313455149501635,4.284777616279071,4.431661129568108,85.17197674418605,75.16279069767442,8.170099667774089,23.913621262458467,8.841846274778883,1.6767295681063126,658,20,136,14,14,222,102,172,0.105,0.812,0.083,-0.4343,3,2,0,0,0,0,27.0,1,0,0,0,8,8,0,2,4,0,17,0,0,1,3,28,23,12,0,2,5,0,3,2,0,2,0,0,1,0,11,11,0,1,4,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,2,3,15,3,19,17,7,18,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,3,11,88,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09862893810919483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06863677283750468,0.10583531121048416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057354026856777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09435717893274068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405578050019157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832569651170441,0.0,0.11829077973803848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666419870230839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09514908546129412,0.0,0.051033918563645364,0.0721053700454305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05273245978848698,0.0,0.057361606948952835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1808293128694257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11393919837535813,0.7631621758983752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0554692253294484,0.0,0.0,0.10687171658818104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09861990976673707,0.0,0.08912422308772595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056243329755085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185976128310505,0.0,0.06997308328028852,0.0,0.10545176901107373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11798333621737102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19397760426276092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010498797708048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811247885360368,0.0,0.0,0.23084756895156164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17656162949309498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094557336713646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07169872865349515,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Cookie-Co,2020/04/16,"I feel digusted with myself Hey guys, 

I normally don´t post much on reddit but I just don´t know who I should talk to and feel like ventig for a bit. (Please excuse any grammer or spelling mistakes I make, english isn´t my first language).

First some thins about me: I´m currently 18 and a girl, 162 cm tall and weigh around 50 kg

My story begins from my childhood on. I was always the fat kid in my family and was kinda bullied for it from my family members. When I was around 16 I decided I don´t want to deal with it any longer and changed my whole lifestyle. I went to the gym regularly and ate much healthier. Thanks to that I actually was able to lose 15 kg and I was so proud of myself. I had the confidence I never had before and my whole life changed for the better because it motivated me. 

But all of that changed. I still have lots of body fat and it shows especially on my tummy. It makes me teribly insecure. i´ve started clean eating and I really enjoy it but on some days I just feel like eating and when I begin eating I just can´t stop myself. Today for exable I ate more then a quarter of an cake my mom made and three bowls of cereal (it was made out of whole grains and oats but still...) . I didn´t eat it in one sitting (exept the bowls of cereal), but I think you can understand why it kinda upsets me. After I ate I walked in my room and saw myself in the mirror and just started crying. I feel so disguting. Why do I always do that? One piece of cke would be enough. One bowl of cereal would be enough. So why can´t i stop myself. It realy takes a lot of willpower for me to stop eating. I only stop, when I feel my stomach hurt. Like I feel that I´m full but somthing in me tells me ""no it tasts good eat more"".

One factor that makes all of that worst for me is, that clean eating and regualar excercise actually worked and on one day I had such a nice, toned stomach. I was so incredibly happy, I felt like I loved myself, what isn´t the case very often. But know all of that is gone, just because I can´t contol myself.

I really just want a healthy relationship with food and my body but I just can´t seem to find peace with it. I want food and my body to be my friend not the reason I cry myself to sleep.

I´m sorry my post is so long, thanks or reading.",1.6263495200451707,3.76725127922078,3.166350461133072,90.24996047430832,80.58008658008656,6.008733295689818,19.350837568228872,7.1686216300943375,0.3346808206286469,1769,43,373,23,46,581,208,462,0.09300000000000001,0.73,0.177,0.9929,2,0,0,0,0,0,52.0,0,1,0,7,22,20,0,2,15,0,23,24,8,7,4,88,57,38,0,8,18,1,8,4,1,3,3,0,3,3,22,26,16,4,16,3,0,3,3,6,0,9,19,10,71,14,48,32,20,47,0,2,1,1,14,17,0,10,28,259,93,3,0.06607841570185773,0.0,0.12896600359790725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099650705909224,0.0,0.0,0.08987117720537753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764759882464275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08056157778834384,0.0,0.05622786485699675,0.0,0.0,0.05844098888279881,0.07214051578680758,0.2201946705967981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097066063819564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14516807369025714,0.08523022319351775,0.06812394509511854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4733030103029553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13655333458788865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458569899062948,0.0,0.20046739447860615,0.09441286676099783,0.06344564155313416,0.0,0.06039447484006285,0.11241253327965177,0.1598045651152287,0.0,0.05105202005665798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05542344002151984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06542802037855662,0.0,0.07034170223777476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073831067513894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262993833975699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046673139181136816,0.12913030464890649,0.0,0.0,0.05847731852966664,0.0,0.07392484496623887,0.0,0.11235501208642487,0.0596383500445214,0.12504998929269767,0.13232356676489115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.077390241843643,0.0,0.0,0.09715047724164426,0.0,0.05096374779438533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06474281761173993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22388222301209268,0.05025561274871332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253425746482063,0.0,0.0,0.1265697129623895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06609629745958723,0.0,0.08466305026629206,0.06793961668610399,0.0,0.07094348930705549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060155307923239525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06612613674341797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07396937645865538,0.09354128547502803,0.0,0.10554061627294573,0.22097805728938333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04968274504749714,0.05311132753525305,0.05775544784749155,0.12167225452627273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04234038065226613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263461173901284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06878996112612643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05452161324555463,0.1169242848410171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06125535336694045,0.17887647699251608,0.2213225740045688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048105873621085135,0.0,0.0,0.0938804212644681,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Senior_Octopus,2020/04/16,"Effectiveness of CBT? Hello, everyone!

Long-time depressive here. My question is - what is the effectiveness of CBT for clinical depression? Most meta-analysis studies report the range to be between 50-85% (which, honestly, the very different range makes me question the methodology of the studies sampled). 

However, reading into what CBT actually does, it makes me think it's just a way to teach yourself to gaslight yourself more effectively? Is it wrong of me to think that?

Thanks.",5.631481481481483,9.076932641975306,5.984197530864197,68.1888888888889,74.43209876543209,10.019753086419756,37.39506172839506,9.994966539143718,5.157454320987656,388,23,56,13,9,124,55,81,0.11900000000000001,0.78,0.10099999999999999,-0.3734,2,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,6,0,4,1,0,5,0,12,9,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,7,1,0,0,7,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,4,2,11,8,2,2,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,3,0,36,11,3,0.0,0.0,0.21673979694219725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3825927548126432,0.0,0.0,0.23204962156832015,0.0,0.0,0.19436321118659453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21222825661094413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19655353799068648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965100071975369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4976107918398793,0.0,0.2221623945902356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20448194876026707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2846283593818802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18325765014237097,0.0,0.17629446023278855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2428339885214419,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,scaarface87,2020/04/16,"Empathy I'm not looking for replies as I don't feel up to commenting, I have recently joined as my mental health is declining, I knew there was lots of people who feel like me and I want to say I'm empathize and feel your pain, knowing other people feel like I do doesn't make it easier, I would rather no one felt this way other than myself. 
I'm sorry use are going through a lot  of pain as well, I hope In time use all at some point find inner peace, keep fighting the daily battles people and hopefully one day use will be the victor.
Take care sincerely from a crazy Scotsman",5.319673123486679,5.3156421779661045,5.984285714285715,82.18262711864409,67.89830508474576,9.115738498789346,28.721549636803875,8.841846274778883,2.0530058111380147,459,14,93,7,7,150,86,118,0.152,0.665,0.182,0.5951,0,0,0,0,2,0,8.0,0,1,0,1,3,11,2,0,4,0,10,3,0,4,1,26,32,6,0,5,2,0,5,2,0,2,3,1,0,0,5,3,0,1,8,0,0,1,4,4,1,2,3,7,11,7,14,26,4,10,0,0,1,0,5,5,0,5,5,58,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14999620662069618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948786866707094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29754833275114184,0.2102016976480577,0.14125597516914132,0.0,0.13446282880151314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08361032717045623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563791381812041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922419604202928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307648899762582,0.0,0.0,0.08085199010924156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14374846451661835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12354173852492173,0.0,0.0,0.2501482593428768,0.0,0.0,0.09820214598234728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14825994681889965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19938139774738287,0.0,0.31308701576345943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059784774542813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390736925349869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14526088987731373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11699382705428378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164686117888338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11061413249145956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08578546053637033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3811871344610114,0.0,0.0,0.08677377710986584,0.11677510977311276,0.0,0.0,0.1322763980504607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1045081279846176,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wrong-Flamingo,2020/04/16,"I recently survived a terrible rip current that dragged me out from the shore, and I can't tell anyone about the whole, frightening experience. I'm in shock. I tell this story calmly, as if a little wave shook me so I swam away, but really I was unknowingly dragged out from shore and battered by waves. Deep down inside, I felt scared, dumb, and helpless, but now I'm oddly at peace?

I swim in the ocean bay for exercise. I noticed the waves were higher than usual, but when they crash along the reef, smaller swells form. I had a body board with me, and it feels nice bobbing along the swells. Suddenly, I started to feel a small pull, which I didn't mind because I could stand and hold myself on a rock. Then the swells got bigger, and before I knew it... I was farther from shore, on my tip toes, waves just... crashing and pulling me... ^farther (I can barely type this). I felt myself panic for a minute, but I knew to stay calm, control breathing, swim parallel to shore. But that fear, being dragged away, the helplessness, no people around, being beat up by water, the possibility of hitting some rock/coral, was in the back of my mind. I yelled out ""help"" once, but knew this was on me.

I swam after each wave hit and dragging force, it felt like a slow battle against Poseidon. After a while, a huge wave came in and I braced myself, I lost my board for a moment, couldn't see, but was carried a long distance away staying afloat. I got back on my board and was hit by another wave, could barely see, carried another long distance, but my leg was scratched by some coral! I felt a little bit of relief, because the coral meant I was close to the shallow, coral filled bay. I could get my footing, and I saw another wave approach, and instead of bracing myself, I got on my board and surfed the wave peacefully. That moment felt so surreal, like time had slowed, everything was clear and quiet, and my body was numb. I moved carefully in the calmer water, just now noticing the pain from the coral scratches.

I could never tell anyone of how foolish, afraid, and helpless I felt. I never mention the fatal ""what ifs"" that could've happened but didn't... and I'd feel crazy to say life has a whole different meaning to me now.

Notes: I always have safety on call, I notify a friend when I swim and give a curfew when I'm back, and they know to call for help if I don't report back in. Luckily, I made it back 30 mins early, on time.
Please do not call me stupid, I was ignorant about being close to the swells, and I learned my lesson.

TL;DR I got stuck in a rip current and I felt like this was the end for me, but after a long battle I managed my way out with some coral scratches. I told my LDR spouse and a friend it spooked me but it was no big deal, but I cannot openly share the trauma/enlightenment from it all. Could anyone relate? Anyone felt this way before?",4.238352575488456,5.3553895648312615,4.6335306394316165,86.91157482238012,70.75843694493784,7.335150976909414,25.975532859680285,7.554174236665415,1.2214128241563054,2227,67,452,24,40,703,247,563,0.135,0.7390000000000001,0.126,0.3783,4,0,0,0,0,0,104.0,0,0,2,5,20,30,4,5,38,0,34,12,6,3,4,94,74,46,1,9,18,1,14,3,2,0,4,3,0,0,18,36,2,3,19,5,0,12,11,19,0,0,40,20,69,11,64,22,9,90,0,4,3,0,19,37,1,7,39,292,87,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05402904671791437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204262182676692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18160927211158184,0.0,0.0,0.05780369692839345,0.0,0.0,0.18301868081248146,0.2496454457699205,0.0,0.07916450608552847,0.0,0.11050556038866524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0708894793001955,0.1442507526044942,0.0,0.0,0.19891004588234432,0.07426548877253797,0.06620301750355811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07282732692513419,0.3110599351350973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06694256262236478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06784064870523893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057510927424338824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05835714961926908,0.0635164505463801,0.0,0.07306712168471938,0.09849547827778399,0.0,0.4987631091366291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10033338629667636,0.0,0.0339245544519809,0.06228917657452718,0.0,0.0,0.2077298273331096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05741960070994705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870457802537439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03568520722617447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04586374934765016,0.095168227852939,0.1301588590067582,0.0,0.1723896738009387,0.0,0.0,0.07088150079823785,0.0,0.0,0.06144070728335065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707305347699515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311266419881172,0.0,0.0,0.06901297794544692,0.0,0.0,0.1001599033477146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1478521771513797,0.0,0.06915099983912251,0.0,0.0,0.06909276458283835,0.07618430542977715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045016023971508584,0.0,0.0,0.07127639284286573,0.0,0.07320164435040923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04159742610574226,0.0,0.06411301626746163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051636935058425086,0.06500876618312501,0.0,0.10348560105911074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045959562030247605,0.13841882393626928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17026161706790824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07572533297194073,0.0,0.0,0.06204579220927271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151398188451144,0.0,0.0,0.10308080198106308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14498964839609138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Arthurjeek,2020/04/16,"Is it a common thing to have a high sex drive when one is feeling down/depressed or anxious? I’m aspergers and also have depression. I’ve heard over and over again that people with clinical depression have low sex drive or no sex drive at all, but I’m the exactly the opposite, because when I’m feeling down or anxious (which is pretty much every day) I feel the need to masturbate, and I’m in my late 20s.. Is it a common thing among Aspergers? Is there a correlation between Aspergers and hyper-sexuality?",4.986734693877551,6.3252046122449,6.365918367346943,74.3576530612245,69.20408163265307,10.089795918367347,32.36734693877551,10.290406445055957,3.5841673469387763,404,18,73,11,7,137,58,98,0.128,0.7959999999999999,0.075,-0.4749,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,7,0,8,4,0,0,2,15,17,11,0,1,4,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,5,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,3,0,1,1,4,2,0,10,16,2,18,0,3,0,3,1,8,0,3,7,50,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1651810025609237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4666940109958798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259132818528436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13321011591333165,0.0,0.5337134665702801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17403048859733045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3133194288920943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21823543468583087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233001687942926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15184081244291744,0.1531570285508961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996620335328874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319840025516373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21013947626374507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744503387281297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Stickygluewithme22,2020/04/16,"Why am I still thinking about this? A few weeks ago, I was let go from my job. It was a job I extremely hated. My boss was very unfair and manipulative and was in a toxic work environment altogether.

Since being let go, I will admit I’ve been dramatically happier. I went back on my weight loss diet and have lost five pounds, getting back into hobbies, and doing anything that makes me happy. 

Still, thorough-out the day I still think about past events that occurred there and it’s brings me down. I’m trying to think of ones to stop thinking about it but I cant.

So has anyone been through something similar and knows what I can do to help myself?",3.2281818181818167,5.175943125000003,4.435681818181821,83.98659090909092,74.78125,6.842045454545455,24.13636363636364,7.686295010490155,1.16981875,512,16,101,7,11,168,90,128,0.083,0.8390000000000001,0.077,0.254,2,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,10,4,1,0,4,0,17,2,0,3,0,18,32,8,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,7,7,2,1,6,0,0,4,1,3,0,2,8,1,14,1,13,20,1,19,0,2,0,0,2,4,0,0,11,72,21,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14008339416990026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049772516184043,0.0,0.13004460684228386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243029475610838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019157920773246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08256376010955484,0.0,0.17962332781851073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682250739471341,0.0,0.15602116634698274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10592367439330493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31363929034915555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08684874234831942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3231912275250067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1725075928821582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054857507273414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10708470885264576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1508567994134685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072342768131173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216586363784497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3786070868087664,0.13211952812338046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4050350468972444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072914866596022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13039068046643024,0.0,0.0,0.12676153125341416,0.1924370517767841,0.0,0.14649469691504827,0.14259681721354553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11504717528505662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Type-APersonality,2020/04/16,"Those with OCD/OCD-like symptoms, how did therapy help? My therapist found that I have OCD-like symptoms, and that it affected multiple parts of my life. The compulsions themselves vary. HAVING to call someone until they pick up if im distressed, HAVING to work on weekends etc etc. prior to pinpointing these symptoms, I felt like I was in an eternal cycle of anxiety. Everything I did revolves around my mood.

The therapy helped me connect my thoughts, emotions and behaviours in a way that I didn't think of earlier. I feel like I know who I am, and that makes it easier to predict my negative tendencies as well.

What are your experiences?",5.602080979284366,7.504942127118646,6.123333333333335,74.51366290018834,68.40677966101694,10.329190207156307,35.99246704331451,10.504223727775694,4.361415065913372,513,27,86,15,9,166,81,118,0.083,0.807,0.11,0.4871,0,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,1,1,1,3,5,0,1,4,0,9,4,0,4,0,16,16,7,0,1,1,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,10,5,0,0,6,1,0,0,2,1,1,0,7,2,16,3,15,9,3,10,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,6,64,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1214392260585402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14131639817404276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16209604078638715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17856636967390774,0.0,0.0,0.3540845036624589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266945939660022,0.1552827326448238,0.0,0.0,0.08026606697197257,0.11340721277139527,0.15241976264206214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17405531981998118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2128063912061997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17147146739488495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724191048791208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11212604398981578,0.15510923920597686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596328943712108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1719049910847873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345038304671775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4949894342714933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3630766939182802,0.184314778919256,0.0,0.1017171646658866,0.0,0.12602552358735236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600411765099565,0.0,0.0,0.14273050870843892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11556799899129755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwyycutieeeepie,2020/04/16,"I feel stuck Im not going anywhere. Im going to be stuck being in this shitty dark place in my head and i cant do shit about it. I really tried to improve. I read all those self help books, read up on psychology, tried meditation, wrote a list of things im grateful about every night, i tried everything but nothing is happening. I dont feel fucking happier. No... i still feel like shit. Im so tired of being here. Im only 16 and i already cant imagine a future where im happy. I tried envisioning myself living the best life, perhaps with a lot of wealth, a loving partner, a beautiful family, but i just cant inagine myself being happy in any of those dreams and i dont get why. Ive been like this for like the past 6 years of my life and now im starting to think maybe this is all there is to life. Maybe im actually normal and happiness is just overrated. Idk anymore...",0.9389042277825724,3.040179945355192,3.5772447512223198,86.57042277825714,82.87978142076503,6.4755823986195,21.653436870865693,7.669130373188453,1.008241530054644,682,22,143,12,19,239,102,183,0.075,0.63,0.295,0.9941,0,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,1,10,12,3,0,7,0,16,9,3,0,2,21,30,8,0,1,5,0,3,3,1,0,4,0,0,2,7,6,0,0,5,4,1,2,7,3,0,0,4,3,16,9,18,22,4,16,0,0,0,2,5,7,3,1,10,84,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.08104822895292461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916515952284762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05647922354111385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08236674831844852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08715951733530818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19467615144127826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06997615026159817,0.0,0.07464312455233763,0.0,0.07829544201070786,0.0,0.12598302523163538,0.059333432283478836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678161634685544,0.04339202239764032,0.0,0.09440242854125423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734439299297592,0.26523596430950264,0.0,0.0,0.08523684516706401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055669005936936966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7176961994282848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17598941572688434,0.12172722505121468,0.0,0.07333775628724294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706091100719891,0.07495902042298327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16687679454734702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794007736274981,0.08137478961066118,0.07969206688730117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316592426832911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07928395715383622,0.0,0.0,0.08677322357335444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1661519377198772,0.0,0.05320619458155212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08664290691538852,0.0,0.1705064349391376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058785690106117075,0.0,0.06632662711788698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05517705057595499,0.053217325020910096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09545777300672667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22555148099030484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07494285965358212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053483726737143605
mentalhealth,missab21,2020/04/16,"Can't to any college (university) work Hi guys, I wanted some advice on studying with mental health issues. I (20F) was a straight A student up until I was about 15. I was bullied at school and forced to do the homework of my classmates every morning at school. 

I'm now at college and away from the bullies but every time I attempt to study or complete an assignment, I get the exact same feelings as I did when I was being bullied. I feel anxious, alone and afraid. I'll do absolutely anything to prevent studying. My procrastination is extreme and no amount of last minute pressure can make me meet deadlines or compete work. 

I also have OCD, so any work I do manage to somehow complete, I have to read over and over and over again to make sure it's perfect. Any advice or tips would be greatly appreciated. I know a lot of you may say to see a therapist and I already am, nothing seems to be working.

How can I complete my work and stop procrastinating and how can I beat my OCD and stop reading everything 100 times to make sure it's perfect?

TLDR: I was forced by bullies to do their homework and now every time I try to complete my own work, I get the same feelings of anxiety and fear as I did then. I have OCD and have to read my work 100 times to make sure it's perfect. Any tips?",3.2541448953122085,4.957780369649806,4.4723513062812685,84.79543450064854,74.09727626459144,6.2960163053548275,30.13692792292014,6.868970318607317,1.65101497128034,1013,46,198,9,21,333,130,257,0.135,0.748,0.11599999999999999,-0.4981,0,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,1,1,13,10,10,0,3,9,0,26,1,0,6,7,47,40,26,0,2,4,0,3,0,0,2,1,1,2,1,3,14,0,3,5,3,0,0,2,3,0,0,7,5,30,7,34,28,6,23,0,0,1,0,6,10,0,8,13,135,33,21,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17676361747583208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09367374481453776,0.09980830826150124,0.07232883505804599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24602281016535024,0.0,0.06919017862248446,0.10217710759882596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07442852985733539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0849760562181979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3793194533238647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2286114439858455,0.0,0.0812861354605929,0.0,0.0,0.10177577194446456,0.13719513104697995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945075606541771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09971593350142416,0.0,0.0895547712716794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09613880724257676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440108326306718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0497062075075777,0.07372474779210204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07689310596904632,0.0,0.0,0.2414909633908963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911472886651966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08678441829687478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27140843173843865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07192549542452367,0.0,0.1830703403818932,0.0720729562769306,0.08233773252917732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15123214230012566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557300307484457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10501361784074227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2109568309595164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06140621908270949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053346805259976884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4609152682328097,0.0,0.0,0.06424953410315776,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lloriraine,2020/04/16,"I feel so dumb Last February I saw a opening for scholarship grant for studying abroad. One of my dream is to study my masters degree abroad so I decided to apply. Although my GPA isn't that high, I think I might have a slight chance because my working experiences are connected to the degree that I am eyeing for. One of the requirements is to do a plan, stating what will you do after you finish my degree if I get accepted and how will it help my home country. 




It's been month now and I haven't finished my application yet and I feel so dumb and stupid because up until now I still haven't finish the plan requirement. There's a voice inside of me saying ""what are you thinking? you're applying for scholarship yet you can't even write a convincing plan?"" I feel so disappointed and I feel that maybe my thoughts are right. That I'm too ambitious for applying. I'm just too dumb. I felt so anxious and stupid and dumb. I don't know anymore.",2.889305381727162,4.980602861702128,4.100600750938675,85.36029411764707,76.23404255319149,7.615018773466834,26.484355444305372,8.4952907291091,1.9269608260325404,750,29,149,15,17,245,97,188,0.162,0.762,0.076,-0.9596,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,4,0,8,16,9,6,0,8,0,18,1,1,1,0,26,31,16,0,1,2,0,5,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,8,8,0,2,11,1,2,0,5,7,0,2,4,9,27,2,15,24,0,17,0,1,2,0,7,4,4,2,12,103,35,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233672262658726,0.20513140113217965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521775791084632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366170019062352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023308869639571,0.0,0.0,0.4183415437618253,0.0,0.19860048339529426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806625894679414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386416414464886,0.21853962816676867,0.20747910486519772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11367479711877547,0.16860360442148925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20780030401101166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2194263725603812,0.0,0.0,0.1650990834305391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28032259821395555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17664169434186905,0.0,0.1644888336895084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16518406068989344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2650716379828436,0.0,0.16420921716936354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15058323190410688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,poolwatertea,2020/04/16,"Beyond repair? I’m really messed up in the head and I don’t think I’ll ever be ok. All night all I could think about was how I’m always everyone’s second choice and how no one has ever really wanted me and needless to say it’s depressing but I kind of like it? I’m not sure how to word it without it sound weird buts it’s like I always want to worst the happen because it gives me an excuse to feel awful and I’m not sure why I’m like this. 

I’m a defeatist and I’m pessimistic and I don’t think I even want to change anymore, at least part of me doesn’t. I’d rather just die. 

I basically feel completely worthless and like I’m a failure, I don’t cut myself a lot of slack anymore. And for some reason the only thing that really matters to my crazy brain anymore is getting people’s sympathy and convincing everyone how hopeless and how much of a lost cause I am. 

It feels like I’d rather have pity for being the way I am than being a success story and I’m not sure why anymore. I think it’s because I tried for so long to get better and be someone and I always came up short. I truly do feel hopeless. 

I’ll be 27 this year, I think all of my problems are kind of set in stone. I still hold onto my belief that if I can somehow one day find a way to make real money that everything will be ok. I don’t think that’ll ever happen though.",1.4010309278350521,2.89349634707904,3.588087972508593,90.06988453608248,78.65635738831615,6.1680274914089335,21.26199312714777,6.918507183188421,0.4323763848797255,1051,28,233,11,25,361,141,291,0.209,0.647,0.14400000000000002,-0.9772,0,0,0,0,0,3,17.0,0,0,0,3,18,26,1,0,11,3,23,2,2,8,9,65,53,23,1,8,10,0,4,5,0,2,0,2,0,0,15,14,0,1,13,0,1,1,10,11,0,3,3,6,25,15,27,41,9,20,1,6,0,0,3,8,0,4,13,148,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.228247095097578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36272114386861626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11147749618950342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086801791058798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10207320241750413,0.0,0.1045788213812355,0.0,0.0939303150718063,0.09672753048306797,0.0,0.0958692695696784,0.0,0.0,0.07300448237131725,0.0,0.0,0.05896887909921623,0.0,0.0787539911865824,0.0,0.09489649164422233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060392844452175964,0.2481282304933297,0.0,0.17474269484132654,0.0821770923105851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18493185641441007,0.06532214415065764,0.0,0.0,0.08357116411670237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0955434342144562,0.08771407525403001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16171371832801856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09384007081115024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1904337683799284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2233559011571808,0.0,0.0,0.08091828924565188,0.0,0.0,0.0998135733532518,0.07773591192964596,0.0,0.0,0.06103447124868722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06721623541787686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08580681704504359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1239192694477698,0.06954146173023977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09901665276346808,0.0,0.06339044969634189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08749223477343168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10407458018713404,0.17572939462993975,0.09401179281939656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07271385265758007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747371959756601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07302118436232663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585330231819401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06074624562945194,0.3515323124797123,0.08983574610771171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06207927717821195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16179457845363598,0.14515583154955786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501416125616278,0.0,0.0,0.08814137503304105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0588820092346297
mentalhealth,JamesFBPL,2020/04/16,"I almost committed a crime I'm 28, lost my right eye when I was a kid and never had a normal life after that. I've been outcastes and a loner my whole life. But tonight I almost committed a crime. I guess I'm finally breaking apart.

I went to a girls place to try to vandalize her vehicle.
I've spend 4 years with this chick from taking her out, buying her food and introducing each other to each other friends and family.

I know I love the hell out of her and wanted a relationship with her but she didn't want it with me so I stood around but I just couldn't stand it. Someone i was attracted to her and later on she became one of the best friends I ever had.

But everytime I had a sense she was seeing someone I would freak out. Two months ago I ruined her dates and I wasn't able to hangout with her anymore. Contact started to stop and I started to get really out of hand by calling her everyday and just wanting to hangout even if it was for 20mins.  But no, my phone goes straight to voicemail and I can only call her on Facebook. 

Tonight I found out she is dating some dude.. my anger and emotions took over... And I couldn't stand it so at 3am I drove to her place to look for her vehicle vandalize it break Windows pop tires whatever it is but her vehicle wasn't there... 

I guess I really don't love her because I wouldn't act like this if I did. 

Now I'm at the point of ""Don't hurt anyone, if you wanna hurt someone hurt yourself"" 

So maybe I should listen and end it. The more I live the more I feel like I'm torturing myself, it's my life I think I deserve to make this decision especially when I been dealing with it for over 20 years",1.2913235294117626,3.3243130639534897,3.105882352941176,90.81558823529413,81.15116279069767,6.3726402188782485,22.617647058823533,7.510576382923642,0.8917868673050608,1290,43,281,20,34,430,167,344,0.11800000000000001,0.753,0.129,0.7789,0,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,0,2,12,17,3,0,13,0,23,9,2,1,4,63,51,27,0,13,11,0,2,2,2,3,4,1,1,3,15,26,1,1,5,2,2,4,10,9,0,2,19,6,56,8,41,27,7,47,1,5,3,2,33,18,1,8,23,192,71,0,0.10616937974692832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09411274925184014,0.0,0.21262659536283704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10529149614558704,0.07423609888008785,0.0,0.0,0.09451325719040064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471986846517205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141821391419827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21682161433977912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10945596863726254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942626220745398,0.094034557714336,0.0,0.0,0.07012387401557829,0.09603628229279798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10008704239257947,0.0,0.05368242843297583,0.07584742610485072,0.0,0.11630336599447648,0.0,0.0,0.12838043541754027,0.11640924492883788,0.16405239885588666,0.0,0.05546911893821902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23391508286590304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409695505992834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058347914539761424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22497171815050232,0.1037379922436674,0.0,0.093749507429744,0.0,0.0891555395458565,0.0,0.11589641962320135,0.0,0.19164402070187714,0.0,0.07086888539981942,0.0,0.10666141209033513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474338599903199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08188437079547986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040234502582617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07194311940166298,0.08074659747301889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22184880966989984,0.0,0.10036438083708897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13602964657644684,0.0,0.0,0.11398618106700716,0.0,0.09066807020424142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.084603249862368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698709127807383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15029446687134898,0.0,0.0,0.08876235541856158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0798261606273537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0680290516101699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12202608387240275,0.0,0.0,0.11795808737693655,0.07208203970704433,0.0,0.1037120569985021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18786435278554894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984200786909022,0.0,0.11853432096031168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07541968122390003,0.0,0.0,0.13673919931434927
mentalhealth,WanonymousX,2020/04/16,"Why does this happen? Is it anxiety? Why do I always feel shaky when this happens?

I find that whenever my mind gets active, I get shaky, get heart palpitations and feel unwell. For example, I watched an interesting video, I then search more about this topic and read on different webpages to learn more. Or if I’m working on assignment and I browse over lots of information and start thinking a lot about many different ideas. I then start to do things faster because my thoughts race and I feel shaky, get heart palpitations. Is this anxiety? I don’t feel worried, it’s more that when my mind gets active it overstimulates me somehow. I could even be on facebook and writing a long comment to somebody and this happens. Does anybody experience the same?",4.1133540372670785,6.9325879130434815,4.415155279503106,80.96478260869567,75.66666666666667,7.710973084886129,30.146997929606627,8.634040054169528,2.7157954451345754,604,28,106,13,14,189,82,138,0.091,0.848,0.06,-0.2869,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,6,4,0,3,4,0,7,2,2,0,0,30,24,13,0,2,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,11,7,0,0,10,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,14,1,11,21,6,12,0,0,1,0,3,4,0,8,8,68,25,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11057179067025263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20331484040457296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100606735765938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060986516297236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2776751567257483,0.0,0.0,0.23257885431227696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776994447914868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299879990590902,0.0,0.0,0.2687646014549303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145538931171353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3471372309260336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3525319317524416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31494108082856803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001211009917387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759992129634927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2259498368057141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472553866942658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26835394088853803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13292195289844222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1881147782835136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08828354840010558,0.0851479780119862,0.0,0.1054966341876788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2398178774837432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0967425848854836,0.13495217537826734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wrecknruin,2020/04/16,"No idea where else to post this Sometimes I just can't breath properly. It's like there's a brick on my chest, and when it's bad I start shaking a little and can't concentrate. The first time it got really bad (and lasted for about 2 days) mom took me to the doctor, and apparently there's nothing wrong with me physically. It's happening again right now, though this time it's not really that bad. I have no idea why it happens, or how I can calm myself down/stop it. I've talked to my parents about it and they say that I have nothing to be stressed about and need to learn how to deal with problems.

Can someone help me? Is there anything I can do about this?",1.374608967674661,3.5362795839416066,2.524238790406674,94.39447080291971,81.62773722627738,5.958081334723673,20.73461939520334,7.1686216300943375,0.3773028154327425,521,15,117,7,14,166,82,137,0.14300000000000002,0.77,0.08800000000000001,-0.821,2,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,1,15,9,0,2,4,0,10,3,2,2,0,18,16,11,0,2,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,13,8,0,0,3,0,0,2,5,7,0,1,2,1,13,2,14,13,0,16,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,10,76,26,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12375242718042676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37669066681028346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09698461892295668,0.15503830934660734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15392341213023292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12562573189634466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12791573568377554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027505360180325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26596644851039225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007985807357491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33952829145115504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122582247694877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346955644680274,0.15072331157030908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1761267970991779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150711751534842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885931624946967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698256756783394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14402538112535376,0.0,0.0,0.14389625812527804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19267845041982606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842629315875975,0.0,0.11959062810995773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741906046869067,0.0,0.1487326703130332,0.0,0.10644188863333966,0.0,0.0,0.12572695385230506,0.1722632624551324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087218989919565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14775057174237036,0.0,0.17537911813905188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670810890293813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13569730161729482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442024502202085,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thruAblue-eyedhaze,2020/04/16,"What should I do now? On December 28th 2019, my now ex chose to come to my home when I was recovering from a major surgery and when I had told him he was not welcome. He raped me and I called the police n spent 3 days in the hospital. I was having really bad panic attacks and anxiety and missing a lot of work cause I couldn't leave my house n I couldn't stop crying so I was put on meds for that and I couldn't sleep so I got pills for that. I was put in therapy (a 90 minute session each week) for the assault and PTSD. 

I was doing my best and then my therapy place shut down cause of the virus. They offered tela sessions but those proved ineffective for me. The clinic that would drain the fluid off my back(post op care) also shut down so now I'm very swollen and in pain all the time. 

The issue is, now that my therapy is gone, I'm falling back into how it was directly after the assault. I can't sleep much even when I take the pills, I have started having panic attacks even tho I'm taking my meds and a new thing started where when I manage to sleep, I'm crying in my sleep. I will wake up with my face wet and feeling really sad. 

I don't know what to do now. I'm missing a lot of work again because the anxiety it taking over. I don't want to miss work but I feel like I can't help it. I don't wanna lose my job. I have started crying a lot again, and I just feel like any progress I have made so far is going away and I don't know what to do to stop the regression. 

Any advice would be much appreciated.",1.2102602073196531,2.8140222515337427,3.20027290035964,92.14033742331293,79.5521472392638,6.337042521683942,21.057330230590228,7.237678284180719,0.4296506452295321,1178,32,273,15,29,398,156,326,0.149,0.733,0.11699999999999999,-0.8947,1,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,1,7,23,20,5,2,18,0,34,12,6,4,2,44,62,26,0,8,4,1,4,2,0,4,5,0,1,0,12,16,0,2,6,0,1,6,10,15,0,0,13,4,41,5,31,41,9,47,0,5,0,1,10,18,0,3,25,183,53,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485555824959164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944306485730611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11810350566947644,0.0,0.13285926858116293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19757795946730927,0.0815856881773733,0.13354371522995093,0.07250479518863914,0.05293468414976053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0911294800491196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08866970795910814,0.0,0.08853553175777445,0.1784098757281465,0.0,0.07480189882526891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2861572355104032,0.05600231609931588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470929130116456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13172133044526632,0.12407193153036647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049351146560638805,0.0,0.06945102888965396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058204631243745066,0.0,0.08710402346269251,0.0,0.0,0.1001975858964133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09063467623080268,0.08617176161458925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09544606626082952,0.0,0.0,0.09194724536263467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08484779070130401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971477576913608,0.0,0.2214756925340884,0.0,0.08216673342137096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19291140449318134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1276695409639558,0.0,0.0,0.08386716902174125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09240008814745564,0.2037676905726996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09072559128574297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08316529991744187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10150714436152833,0.1745892010090722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11125928632569304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3475965847394971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18438982468512247,0.0,0.0,0.14519829412196109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19587057421034199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2979150902789605,0.0,0.0576902681813477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05063502295680837,0.0,0.0,0.08297593393360206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0716491522564597,0.05121837859859946,0.0,0.06965494942237181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18965387439933268,0.0,0.0,0.12337222243927068,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AriaJung,2020/04/16,"Feeling Down Hello everyone,
I’m feeling really down today. My work never fails to remind me that I am nothing but a failure. Today, my boss shared to everyone that all his team member performed so well except for that one person which is me. I’m really struggling with my work now and everybody expects that you will perform well just because everybody is doing a good job. 

I honestly feel like I’m a disposable person and everyone can jusy get rid of me anytime. After all, I’m not good enough. I have been struggling with anxiety for more than 5 years and experiencing panic attack is already a common thing. I’m scared that constant feeling of rejection and worthlessness will worsen my condition. I have been talking to a counsel the past few months and she told me to try writing what I feel, maybe it can help in releasing negative emotion.

Thank you for reading, I do not necessarily have someone to share this and I’m not the type of person that can easily open up vulnerable things about it so hope this helps. 

Again, thank you.",4.783903846153844,6.8890390923076925,5.7436378205128245,75.59084134615384,70.8974358974359,8.772435897435898,30.649038461538463,9.354420925462401,3.0949038461538465,833,36,140,19,16,274,117,195,0.159,0.598,0.243,0.9511,1,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,3,0,6,8,19,1,4,7,0,16,0,0,1,3,27,32,9,0,2,6,0,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,3,14,9,0,0,5,2,0,0,5,8,2,1,3,6,19,11,21,27,5,16,0,3,0,0,17,5,0,1,12,102,33,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13459014883517542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330201664508693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875149441801815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07434803509589133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13179960077914632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719292304725644,0.0,0.1260212670992432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34962507554157457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083429530852146,0.08713100368878315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06372108132104985,0.0,0.0,0.20459499314578636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16349960469058347,0.0,0.0,0.12113762931653957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12103030857179953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05958537981470065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225290872421504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09735038691852736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406604522046337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11702761001165987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264586583733753,0.0,0.0,0.1430983074088705,0.0,0.0,0.11642830184215992,0.0,0.3194824062557184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199686198163988,0.0,0.15626633949649946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12210709745354198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033395801042657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2550062087018952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09802992821105597,0.0,0.22457586601598045,0.0,0.0,0.16205473414381846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23121495083049,0.11654169184719153,0.0,0.0828054528696502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21932030912082665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17758228070932505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07854072505631053
mentalhealth,PoringOP,2020/04/16,"Hurts to like things? (31/F) Sorry this is a big TL;DR but ive never really put my thoughts into words before. I'll try to highlight the important parts.  


Ive heard from lots of years of studying psychology and stuff that not liking things anymore is depression...

  
but for \~13 years or so, **ive suffered from experiencing physical pain from doing the things that I like.**   


A good example that I give to people is... I used to LOVE to read, i sucked down a lot of books, anime, video games, etc.

but the past 10-13 years... i just cant. 

​

When I lived in Seattle, I got books from the library... like the little 30 page sonic the hedgehog comics and it took me a MONTH to read them. 30 pages! When before I would have a book half done before I even got home!  


**Because when I read... it PHYSICALLY is painful. I cannot WAIT to get it over with, and I can only half ass focus for about 1/2hr before I literally have to give up and do something else because the pain is so overwhelming.**  


Its the same when I play video games or watch anime.  


When I write my ""About Me"" section on websites, i still wrote that I liked these things... but last year or so, I'm like.... do I? Do I even like these things anymore? Do I even like anything anymore?

​

**The only things that I can do that DOESNT hurt is things that i HATE...** Like talking to people. I cant stand people... but day in, day out, I just am in online chatrooms, studying people... trying to figure out why I am the way I am by looking at others to see if anyone else feels the same.  


I hate cleaning, but its the one thing I can do. I used to hate memes, but I am now a memelord and I will spend every waking moment that Im not talking to people... looking up and reposting memes. I hate being a leader and telling people what to do, but I am glued to community management.  


If my friends online tell me to do things, I can do them. If they sit me down with an anime, I will binge for 17hrs... but i could NEVER bring myself to watch more than 1 episode of anything.  


**It feels like my life is on backwards. I've never met anyone in my years of community management that has EVER felt like this....**

 I just went to a psychiatrist a couple days ago and tried explaining it to him, but im not sure he fully understood it.. He tried me on 3 meds for anxiety and sleeping (Lamictal, seroquel, and Lexipro) (and ive had lamictal and seroquel before)  


But... I just want to like things again ;\_; I dont want things to hurt anymore. **i want to be able to be by myself.**  


Does anyone have any sort of any clue at ALL about what this could be? **Any thoughts are appreciated.**",0.04927895743181665,2.418523481835564,1.872018466337931,93.8979985156486,94.29636711281073,4.511713796920599,18.16264969306632,6.271793719691671,-0.06130248565965647,2003,59,424,23,76,655,228,523,0.096,0.785,0.11900000000000001,0.8681,0,0,1,0,0,0,142.0,0,0,3,0,22,31,5,1,22,0,51,8,3,2,6,72,85,37,0,9,24,0,3,12,1,3,4,1,2,0,37,17,0,1,8,12,1,4,11,14,0,3,13,10,60,17,62,63,11,53,0,6,5,2,21,21,2,9,37,294,97,8,0.05599446869998755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04963571798962501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12133996688438918,0.136078816741004,0.11423447654442027,0.0,0.04283561529188989,0.0,0.22212586715123986,0.11745790335382995,0.05737295030330755,0.09215735340430832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826741679528811,0.0,0.2382358433809816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08941405389110718,0.061956814584720125,0.0,0.10833540001402177,0.0,0.048227953841800536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04900113689942488,0.057301782344379736,0.06562510029134314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093552387091099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06244863406982418,0.11095145543979043,0.05065020268297109,0.047177754901371764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056624971640498886,0.040002459627494984,0.05376347105727783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04326118761732516,0.0,0.029254798809275825,0.10742999329660144,0.0,0.046965503705976124,0.08956778362288671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22113178108230647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05616701761600182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17982971054545294,0.0,0.12096726979011554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04564296547267237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03955054919597375,0.3282728282034055,0.05612116791212963,0.04944414172831152,0.0,0.09404250228136796,0.0,0.0,0.09520898981515938,0.05053719417175692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062197231676312935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044694250697937664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295591586327882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03794330113935167,0.08517263330747228,0.17874618780111065,0.0,0.0,0.06063655298094566,0.05345305628033728,0.2329170854127089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056289906819518565,0.0,0.0,0.16802886479534074,0.0,0.035871490469527735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04462034192558849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05603490723562123,0.0,0.0,0.04310727764747852,0.0,0.06268122337496251,0.0,0.0,0.04471725503481396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06410027010222184,0.0,0.0,0.05277412408242094,0.0,0.0,0.09001246581654665,0.09788326739980266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4092026060841633,0.0,0.0,0.08890670700988347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06221191502938365,0.15206627469533196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09672248529173888,0.0,0.0,0.0990809652177344,0.044445802926067854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051907433469464886,0.0505262986192726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03977686400467919,0.0,0.136078816741004,0.1802930099601107
mentalhealth,octobees,2020/04/16,"How to deal with intense relationships? I have a friend who I care about, she's amazing but she texts me every single day and wants to call every second day (this isn't related to lockdown she's always been like this) she doesn't live with anyone but does have other people to talk to, she has a mental health condition (I'd rather not divulge which one) that does cause her to be extremely intense a lot of the times though so other people can only be around her in small doses. I can't handle the daily texting, usually all day. I've told her this but it never usually ends well. If I take a day away from my phone I go back to a barrage of texts of her telling me about her day that then devolve into complaining about lonliness and how noone cares etc which just makes me want to avoid the conversations more. I've comforted her before because of this and she does quickly pick up after I agree to a call but it's getting really uncomfortable because it's starting to feel like I'm obligated to talk to her within certain timeframes so I don't end up with texts trying to end the friendship or annoyance or complaining of some sort. 
On top of that when I do take time to myself she assumes it's because it's because I'm struggling with my mental health or I'm not doing well but it's just because I'm introverted and don't want 24/7 contact. I've also told her this. 

I want to be more assertive with this but I don't know how to because I know she'll receive it poorly and react intensely which I don't have the emotional energy for. I'm a bit lost at this point.",2.9679571759259247,4.762809890625,4.335347222222222,85.08974537037038,75.09375,7.1157407407407405,25.28935185185185,7.921354282810032,1.4539108796296298,1255,43,249,19,27,415,155,320,0.084,0.782,0.134,0.9189,0,2,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,19,16,1,2,12,0,19,3,0,7,3,49,42,24,0,6,15,0,1,2,1,1,3,0,0,0,23,12,0,1,4,0,1,2,10,6,2,2,4,1,34,10,42,34,8,34,0,1,0,0,33,12,0,8,22,172,57,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07671156900935865,0.0798176809913561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670733236427264,0.0,0.0,0.08539401158861756,0.0,0.0,0.09012514297367052,0.07376077040723175,0.0,0.3508516812574753,0.0,0.08162551537253923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10472577600652444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19590127351440376,0.0,0.19560483305777432,0.098541888394424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3093199835695761,0.09889495433877696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25183509310517155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079032499999842,0.25488450033031274,0.0,0.10698226320438388,0.0,0.0,0.1616427025964149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04850280322553804,0.06852917967599442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07411178529599413,0.0,0.050117102364574666,0.0,0.054516658976049084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20392859197435534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543626658305698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372868500330754,0.0,0.0847039533063077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10471398928136956,0.08155240990891993,0.0,0.0,0.06403100052845546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19334063707357751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07398364120018985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06500158553979958,0.07295564754965125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330052947118076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09068058127571628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061452316645608414,0.0,0.0,0.10298806280021937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789654608909511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10028213583448026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1442480407156983,0.15420252905602924,0.08384309466690837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942462937551999,0.0,0.11186983367808537,0.0,0.0,0.1833218074445,0.0,0.06512710192258311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112967205318812,0.0,0.2263173258546376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17249704736582347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SupremeMovement,2020/04/16,"We Are A UK Social Enterprise who help Authors Publish Their Mental Health Memoir For Free. *Hi, this is a not-for-profit post, hope it's allowed.*

I'm one of the co-founders of Supreme Movement (SUicide PREvention for MEn). As one of our ongoing campaign pledges, we are helping authors self-publish their mental health memoir for free. We take away the stress and worry for first time authors who have experience with mental health issues. This is UK-based only at the present time.

Our publishing campaign was developed because of vulnerable authors being taken advantage of, financially and psychologically. We provide extensive free help that includes formatting, cover design and account creation. We even hand over all publishing accounts to the author after the book has been published so that the author retains 100% control of their book, account, and royalties. It's a completely free service.

Our community interest company was set up in the UK to help raise awareness of mental health issues among boys and men in England and Wales.

The main campaign page is here: [https://www.suprememovement.co.uk/supreme-publishing](https://www.suprememovement.co.uk/supreme-publishing) and has an extensive FAQ section.

**A little bit about me.**

At the end of 2018, due to major depression among other ills, I was sectioned under section 2 of the Mental Health Act UK and remained in a psychiatric hospital for almost two months. During my recovery time, I rediscovered my love of writing and book production. Writing became a positive psychological tool that I used as a distraction and grounding technique to focus my emotions in the present.

It was then I realised that I needed to give something back and so I got to work with my partner to develop a mental health enterprise specifically focused on raising awareness of mental health problems in males.

My partner is a former school teacher who studied in design and is a campaigner for mental health awareness. We are dedicated to Supreme Movement and its campaigns. The publishing campaign is free and will remain free to all authors who wish to publish their mental health memoir.

We would love your help, not just in sending any authors with mental health issues our way but also to help us raise awareness of what we do. We have supporter logos available on the website along with a growing self-help resource.

One last thing - I hope the lock-down is going well for you and that you are all staying positive during this difficult time.

Thank you for reading!

Ben Oakley, founder of Supreme Movement.

I'm happy to answer any questions you may have in this thread. I'm usually online from 8am to 6pm (GMT).",7.436127819548871,9.831745921052637,6.906493734335843,68.75178947368424,64.5701754385965,8.807919799498746,37.8092731829574,9.312151188531436,4.062894686716793,2164,113,306,41,35,673,228,456,0.031,0.7979999999999999,0.172,0.9956,1,1,1,0,0,1,79.0,14,5,4,5,9,24,0,2,26,0,26,14,1,4,3,53,43,22,1,6,3,0,1,0,2,3,11,0,0,6,20,29,0,3,2,4,9,7,1,5,1,5,7,1,36,25,62,32,10,50,0,1,0,2,48,23,0,5,16,208,56,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056721428663693216,0.0,0.0,0.04529870134130757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07704060069463038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05321950766525037,0.04355623477045974,0.0,0.034530049225558766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06184128041335558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059390831524094786,0.0,0.06353178483735772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04878794887461717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.063717600338867,0.05017034156252959,0.0,0.0,0.03741325313335312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055409331086579035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04818190524910194,0.0,0.06210792841561461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054338704040272606,0.032192456561287185,0.0,0.04530389639316105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060299276840414334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6021060774856994,0.0,0.0,0.26577397598541697,0.0,0.0,0.11252182516922388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17736687478504706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046172945119570916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056772814369488174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224800552833184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.57084478189109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045213214419027835,0.0,0.0,0.042001285784001016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11515163024704725,0.04308080426708743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0542499109257577,0.0,0.0,0.05420127428131463,0.0,0.0,0.0634549650152955,0.0,0.056659972844696226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05732740384077557,0.0,0.0,0.11818543485873916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057742081129333524,0.0,0.043607814357785976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06037565369383462,0.0,0.0,0.06488624831922936,0.0,0.0,0.061960046737778426,0.06427967074130772,0.0,0.0,0.0425897227747488,0.0,0.0,0.05215077774686769,0.0,0.0,0.03763218449555317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13211978976123168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05533358639888753,0.0,0.06813653226041905,0.048922785350985286,0.062386072670497186,0.0,0.0,0.04496188181570493,0.0,0.0,0.050930337703877136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06513854510107753,0.0,0.0,0.04123797546613882,0.05752538557801255,0.0,0.0402387298830598,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,McYodo,2020/04/16,"A constant feeling of dread/loss Hey, uh I'm here cause I was feeling really odd and I'm noticing myself constantly with like a weight in my gut and I couldn't figure it out. Since quarantine started I've become hypersensitive to the fact that I base my life on distracting myself from any problems or anything and I don't know why or what I'm supposed to do. I seem to be doubting myself more and more every day and just a few nights ago I spent like an hour trying to figure out how someone would impersonate me because all I do is try to be someone better than whatever I may be. Some of my more iron-willed morals and personal goals seem to have flattened like wet paper recently, for example that I wouldn't watch anime (nothing to people who can watch it or anything, its just a stupid rule I've always kept) because I've understood that addiction is a very real thing with it and then I watched like 4 anime fully and just fucking broke down for like 2 hours in a pit of ""depression""? Then someone close to me recently got cheated on in a significant relationship to them and I tried to support them and by the time I sent the message I was feeling the weight in my gut again from a relationship I got cheated on during that seems to be coming back to haunt me and I am constantly feeling guilt and shame every time I show weakness to myself because I don't know what else I'm supposed to rely on if not myself. I've found myself watching a funny youtube highlight video and being chuckling to myself and then the video ends so i back out to see what's next and within the second I'm instantly thinking about why I'm happy and then i feel like dogshit again. Self doubt is something I've never allowed myself to be brought down by and now I am being plauged with it by everything i do. It legitimately feels as though I'm not the same person anymore or what i was even before now. It's starting to scare me a lot as well because I may screw something simple up and before i KNOW i'd just shrug it off or just get annoyed but now like i'll mess up and just a flash of a thought of harming myself and then I'll just find myself thinking like ""What the hell was that for?"" and then keep on going. And it's terrifying to me cause my dad killed himself, my friends family have killed themselves, people have talked about wanting to kill themselves to me and I've always considered myself to be the rock in the river that someone could hold onto so they don't go under because I'd ""never"" falter on that but I'm having to bare myself here and admit that I'm fucking terrified of changing for the worse. And the longer I go on the more this weight feels heavier and i feel guilty because maybe I'm just making a big deal out of it and i should man up like my dad told me to but then i fear of turning up like him and its just a mental stuggle against myself man. And it doesn't help that theres just that shit that you cant explain, like i wish it was something as simple as like a pornography addiction, or drinking alcohol underage because that seems common and not as shameful but theres just some flaws i've noticed in myself that i can barely even admit subconsciously, far less on my main account in front of random people. I feel weak, not like myself, like I need someone to hold onto that i can talk about this with personally face to face and we know each other and god knows ive tried to get into a relationship but it never works out. And then its just more self doubt and shame from more failures. I've taken psychology and I know what is and isn't normal depressive behavior yet I can't allow myself to even think of admitting that level of defeat because i know people are having it worse but I feel as though I still need something to confirm that i've not lost yet. I usually pride myself on being able to answer every question possible in as logical of a procedure possible but its so fucking painful to admit but i dont even know anything anymore it just seems like every time i try to remember something i was right about the answer has changed and i dont know what im supposed to do cause i hold myself to a high standard in terms of moral and unchanging ways but now i gotta change it feels and i dunno what to do. If any of you guys/gals/whatever can, please let me know what you think i should do. I already feel guilty for asking for help, but uh just yeah. Thank you for at least reading that, i suppose idk.",4.522967652224828,5.415544727678569,5.336292447306793,82.96587968384075,69.91517857142857,7.83969555035129,28.751024590163933,7.980938725307492,1.818611043618267,3540,126,695,44,61,1154,342,896,0.146,0.753,0.1,-0.9955,1,1,7,0,0,0,45.0,1,4,3,6,44,57,13,10,33,1,57,20,5,7,5,179,138,78,3,14,37,2,16,15,1,7,7,0,0,7,50,53,5,5,47,6,2,7,19,34,3,1,18,21,94,23,115,101,17,92,3,5,5,4,40,42,6,24,57,478,144,4,0.04618218121678649,0.0,0.0,0.10069078854454244,0.0,0.0,0.04093771717531594,0.04935470682259357,0.0,0.0,0.050963185365408635,0.0,0.07685454869953734,0.0,0.0,0.06281093376377651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916006284895483,0.0,0.0,0.1140120004936706,0.0,0.04317410530148587,0.0,0.0,0.07102249339957517,0.0,0.2252178321779551,0.05100459080423618,0.07859526947422864,0.0,0.0,0.04084438633109876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423254647308119,0.1465638725659784,0.03978185986847435,0.0,0.14971959412468547,0.0,0.03687271382331683,0.0,0.0,0.0297836863282993,0.04761180098173461,0.07955329002121032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825034487827083,0.04524095585243657,0.0,0.0,0.03857928643856435,0.0,0.04090370496046415,0.0,0.0,0.12201158055665245,0.0,0.15564191798514354,0.0,0.04150556663341248,0.0,0.04353645034231282,0.051967793279529995,0.2802131813099064,0.0329925594889084,0.0,0.0,0.0422096769713869,0.0,0.0,0.050636377997380286,0.03568023864823553,0.1280840470954957,0.048256567173068164,0.0,0.07873919356285064,0.0,0.07387221828321401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049161790659439514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061909885182024074,0.04879401003323,0.0,0.0,0.09096029161309636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049884680616214684,0.0,0.0,0.041048844608530914,0.15328122317092008,0.0,0.25380519028366977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04722440923267118,0.0326198403627731,0.3384342148566556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05041330622985265,0.039262438980083116,0.0,0.0,0.03082696457271924,0.0,0.046396208339313696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046540776501574926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848700439990756,0.10685563558664754,0.0,0.04911527364947532,0.04333884860520118,0.045248732186941185,0.04431304841782182,0.10515743881749512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049141096900537716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12806763830725598,0.12097349792618455,0.0,0.050694166727293655,0.0,0.10412694064338117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04419011038465619,0.0,0.0,0.051734612251488815,0.0,0.046194678770899535,0.05256543279087414,0.02958548784980842,0.0,0.09119866498344292,0.14874713828395314,0.05231540864042912,0.039439330423984516,0.0,0.0,0.04623641994465565,0.0,0.03680121920262031,0.2102126164916917,0.09635617393716382,0.0,0.047405345363254574,0.038202377536018385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1956500613907031,0.17776649678958603,0.0,0.0,0.06537597112724741,0.0,0.03688114957568114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05240699196120169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07423897582424031,0.0,0.04251834769268932,0.0,0.0,0.030681389117221087,0.11836670787587918,0.0907475171315028,0.03666349328642789,0.0807876037643149,0.0,0.0,0.044129053246536695,0.0,0.15677334784103006,0.05023295161668876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05086314804087273,0.03810513609313066,0.027239447020717046,0.036657265846290664,0.0,0.16871236550996602,0.04152332717088953,0.0,0.08334447073874048,0.0,0.053107229239162924,0.0,0.0,0.033621177952944226,0.0,0.09412717622805222,0.032806496504894485,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,porterbill62,2020/04/16,"Does anyone else’s parents make them feel small and un lovable? Have you ever had so much power but felt powerless - 
Hi everyone, I’m 17 year’s old and I’ll be turning 18 in June. Much like many in this thread me and my sister are victims of narcissistic parents/ mom in particular. My mother expresses all traits of a narc mom such as, emotional invalidation, gaslighting, boundary breaking, obsession with the external, public and at home shaming,  Considering us her sole care takers and the list goes on. 
        This has resulted in my sister being taken home early and a few DCF cases in the past due to physical and emotional abuse. I’m due to receive money from a lawsuit when I was younger (something she never lets me forget she fought for) and now I just am having a hard time getting over just sheer guilt if I’m being honest. I’ve previously tried involving DCF through high school and she would constantly try to paint me as a bad child to keep me in the house I believe solely to receive my money. 
       I am working on my emotional strength (I’m a water sign) however living home it isn’t very easy especially considering the fact that she is relying on this money planning on even quitting her job. The settlement is roughly 380K - considerable but not enough for me to now support her 41 year old retirement job. She isn’t entitled to any of it it’s for my pain and suffering however I know even if I were to give her the majority she’d still want to have complete control over where I allocate the rest of the expenses. She’s also a very experienced loan officer so sometime I do considering using her as a financial tool but again even if it were to by my business I feel she would usurp control and immediately deny me of any form of power. 
My mother is also now dealing with multiple health issues which just makes this issue with guilt so much worse. If anyone could offer any help, advice or a free service I could reach out to I’d really appreciate it.",5.414389499389499,6.6012506058201055,6.624973544973546,73.45941391941392,68.07407407407408,9.836548636548637,32.26332926332926,10.035473477838034,3.38641277981278,1571,67,279,38,26,530,216,378,0.11900000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.125,-0.1997,9,0,1,0,1,0,28.0,1,1,1,8,20,15,2,4,18,0,26,3,0,6,4,50,46,28,0,9,12,8,5,1,0,2,2,0,3,1,11,15,1,3,5,0,6,2,4,9,0,0,7,6,40,7,43,30,9,39,0,1,0,0,36,17,0,5,20,186,51,5,0.0,0.10855539596318638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895305626229771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14653787672107915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18691539237593333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12812646851261505,0.09387610327550854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07649935066137903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032250100489416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934132793880494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606242663190848,0.09900928957308436,0.2055205244013761,0.14630314308378106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944567867296814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08017778001426136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07653723144622789,0.3091824352668197,0.0,0.09466854264227914,0.0,0.18154357121901896,0.08287605278890314,0.0,0.0875473828996714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09265222822940246,0.0,0.08797011718485499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047867967392387634,0.0878908012598538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08207403643544207,0.0,0.0,0.09738838370974932,0.0,0.0,0.061411338161109615,0.09680216468103926,0.2757087121294399,0.0,0.0,0.10571783892321668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1912561468802589,0.18183856093137812,0.08143657414209783,0.0,0.0,0.05035227030942988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.093688242396814,0.0,0.044761183565962266,0.0,0.08090264367994797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1223148865671286,0.09288887963337043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2146098132918393,0.0,0.0,0.2020549873474292,0.0,0.0706634333880418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19228075623831986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749074838352376,0.0,0.2034676053783304,0.0,0.08746220309809005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09744975616600153,0.0,0.0,0.0586944845290564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09272491029559174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07053399253423819,0.09061508848168837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07316830718401181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10396993940057857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053424692350924834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1244087085686951,0.099656872872342,0.0,0.0,0.11020826722326196,0.07913075735437365,0.0,0.15119313443468052,0.05404018719765275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06670086764246191,0.0,0.09336919027544363,0.13016925131228088,0.0,0.0,0.11800128899344332
mentalhealth,whatevsimouttahere,2020/04/16,"Forgot to write down appointment, too shy to call and ask, now anxiously waiting for my psychiatrist to call I  have a new psychiatrist. With the whole corona situation, my  psychiatric appointments will all take place over phone. Now, I already  had the first appointment two weeks ago. We agreed on a new appointment  for this week, since he would go on holiday the week before, and that he  would just call me on my cell phone number.

This  week on monday, I checked my calendar to see when my appointment was.  Realized I had forgotten to write it down. Now I'm too socially anxious  to call and to ask for the date and time. Now I've spent the whole week  sitting at home instead of going outside for walks or sth because I  don't know when my appointment is. Already pissed off my best friend,  whom I'm iving with, wich only fuels my anxiety more.

It's thursday, 11am, still no call from my psychiatrist.

Wish me luck!",6.10409090909091,6.8281149367816125,6.312424242424246,77.97954545454547,66.29885057471265,10.465203761755488,31.91013584117033,10.436869588844218,3.265202298850575,725,28,138,18,11,232,106,174,0.087,0.8059999999999999,0.107,0.68,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,0,2,11,4,1,0,7,0,10,1,1,0,1,20,23,7,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,6,7,0,2,2,1,2,3,2,1,0,2,5,1,18,3,24,15,5,34,0,0,1,0,18,10,1,2,20,88,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732271589241673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423132481495999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398948551526646,0.248064186840374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20527872456451224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692731241306675,0.0,0.09342368858491744,0.0,0.11521842964118928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5605422362930513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338780272796568,0.0,0.0,0.08482392200974145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12479302207461496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012889345348237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060338025982778126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21207283324625045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08350067581297757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11470777788457995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748886963122474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081989402170584,0.1234092006882238,0.0,0.11191765982954564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767889099844609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254884501067175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06401976426052694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107249433664653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.440336863814888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2451545010432344,0.12625373713297705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15598414171939073,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,madelinesokay,2020/04/16,"Trying to stop binging and purging bc it’s destroying my life Pls give advice Feeling more helpless than ever, I can’t get out of the binge/purge cycle which is kind of exhausting, I try so hard to have self control, I’ve even been reading books on it (Currently reading Jocko) the only thing that will stop me from binging is if I’m doing coke, it’s as if my brain doesn’t know how to not go from one bad habit to the next. Part of me believes I purposely create these habits to have more reason to hate myself, but the other part of me thinks I do these things because I hate myself. Guess I won’t ever know, probably going to die from an OD or damaging my esophagus or getting stomach acid in my lungs but at this point death would be a relief",7.692100840336138,5.557895222222225,7.819253034547152,77.93235294117648,64.09803921568627,10.572922502334269,34.27544351073763,8.841846274778883,2.710756115779645,591,19,120,7,7,193,107,153,0.218,0.7340000000000001,0.049,-0.982,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,5,9,3,0,6,0,13,6,3,3,2,22,26,10,3,3,7,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,11,2,1,3,5,3,0,2,4,7,0,1,1,3,15,2,20,21,4,13,0,2,0,0,2,5,0,5,6,83,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529500398520726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12414725355873382,0.09063808315152012,0.0,0.0,0.1675190885328462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16598362404072028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16676487077205232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15431340664155385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982062181932744,0.26899141628205536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07518050526789889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1553654151002913,0.1426339112051576,0.1690042510853924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16379525510472678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13319415294179318,0.2935948319428021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548344044607498,0.1634287354158833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10502187236592146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15813008105089307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075401253351936,0.11308299892327901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3220265941855791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14055707020879096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16030950064303712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29745404048014895,0.0,0.0,0.15287477717122028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15511274255722726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24861761749351474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19756178424191628,0.09527248714789613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201897131858792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10562282495539398,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,shoemail,2020/04/16,"Why am I not better? My mother has asked me why I'm not better despite seeing a therapist for the past three years and medication for the past two years. She says that I shouldn't be depressed, and that she should be the one. She says that I don't love or care about her. 

My friend died from cancer when I was 9, I don't remember much about it. I just remember my feelings, how confused I was. I know it was from that moment, friendship became a thread to me. It could break so easily, and it always did. During elementary school, my emotions were incredibly dark, something a 10 or 11 year old shouldn't feel. I was so scared of losing my friends, and I did. There was some big stupid fight that still impacts me. Not what we fought about, but my feelings. 

I would write about self-hatred. I hated myself. I dabbled into self harming, biting the skin around my nails, make it bleed. I told my counselor in middle school about it, and she said not to worry about it. That it didn't matter much. My two therapists said the same thing. My high school counselor in 9th and 10th grade said the same thing. I also told her I thought about killing myself so I went to hospital and lied my way out of there. I arrived to the hospital on Friday and left on Friday. I returned to my school on Monday and my counselor checked on me for two minutes, then let me go back to class.

I learned from that my school doesn't care. My own therapist asked me one question about my little stunt. I learned that my therapist doesn't care. I learned that my mother didn't care because now she looks at me like all I want is attention, and yes, I do. I want attention so people will notice that there is something wrong with me, that it hurts to function in the real world. I want them to notice that I truly cannot finish high school not just because it is hard, but because it is painful. I want them to notice that I am slow and weak and they are all blaming me and only piling more bricks on me. 

I am responsible for my actions, yes, but what about my emotions? Why cant i control that? There is so much more to add in this post, but I just wanted to give a ""simpler"" background to my question. From this, can someone please tell me what the missing clue is? Am I just a teenager going through a phase? Am I selfish? Does my life not matter?

Why am I not better?",3.0688777914936622,4.681949592750534,3.690372012119852,90.5870808551229,74.39445628997869,6.216159802491304,24.495623386825272,6.7183091564049375,0.7203697228144996,1825,57,382,15,38,575,204,469,0.177,0.742,0.081,-0.9941,0,0,2,0,1,1,61.0,1,0,3,5,29,27,5,2,15,2,41,8,1,3,2,73,74,28,2,10,17,2,5,1,2,5,6,5,0,1,32,19,0,1,14,0,1,4,17,16,0,6,18,12,81,11,46,47,11,43,0,4,2,1,33,20,0,6,17,278,113,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05278004982013923,0.0549171556996547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058753852178918736,0.12340188593413785,0.0,0.0,0.05074980458802236,0.0,0.12069867332520605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17511449054533074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691649504024572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07402443490847578,0.05269550339877516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05684556722328257,0.0,0.0684974159879072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057756906518792825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14848187787840214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011450959951017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10198262845346892,0.0,0.0,0.06331306243854899,0.07501846237644745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05912289476184863,0.06516118000751345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13946491347864942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0706541959260623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0730190465075371,0.0,0.036271787130467366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170902147014965,0.06748931009389758,0.04661764026755843,0.03224418903129973,0.06614918048696111,0.0,0.0,0.05542324481375534,0.07383694111717158,0.0,0.0,0.05956743423099035,0.0,0.044055407047051034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664878973019165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14555243377660942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2254237727591545,0.06925573183395743,0.0,0.0894464020872814,0.05019585392473653,0.07022848524657056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600863449612928,0.045755980303147495,0.0,0.0,0.0724480071598885,0.0,0.0,0.06320960461594011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14786985567678587,0.0,0.0,0.07512226942563642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952991022194642,0.0,0.1883428907248331,0.10497144683162586,0.06607735562984472,0.4007721821397412,0.052593329063412686,0.0,0.13770445851989216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05592145196790375,0.10161980569860148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05270755909447238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05768677098827432,0.0,0.0,0.306523614101033,0.08769472473616986,0.0,0.0,0.052396502311804635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261313548267832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19341676651094653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1946420841084477,0.052387602557517766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06118251477878525,0.23821836722553186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06702604328220638,0.0,0.046884394144658205,0.07216046642259774,0.0,0.127505203117605
mentalhealth,Biggest-baddest-bean,2020/04/16,Voices I hear a male voice in my head that tells me to do really fucked up shit like literally harming someone in very gruesomeness way possible it scares me because it’s literally pictured into my brain how it wants it done but there always another voice that’ll just be repeating “ignore it” until it stops and goes away. There are only three voices that aren't mine.  What’s wrong with me? The inside of my head probably looks like an explosion occurred. Is there any way to stop hearing these voices? Or am I stuck?.,5.432943722943717,6.814418787878786,5.897431457431459,77.97090909090913,68.1919191919192,9.293506493506491,28.284271284271284,9.606745405546679,2.60564531024531,416,14,75,9,7,134,74,99,0.16399999999999998,0.759,0.077,-0.8145,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,8,2,1,3,0,8,5,4,1,0,11,14,5,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,7,0,1,11,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,6,0,1,2,8,9,2,10,10,0,11,0,0,1,1,4,5,2,1,6,49,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1468375860205378,0.0,0.0,0.1200059859257798,0.18504469750704605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16579983619723015,0.0,0.0,0.1075747739248276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19699943126064007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18059058246398416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314412615768126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3622192728634253,0.0,0.3977901397211334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17242913695094106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481907679703138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13421376115795802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19894396444318668,0.0,0.0,0.19026503749916845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11305151589894047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17667774792218524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18114442399040728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14952287512191878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2950744661146948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15424298817593454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14560663730585555,0.104086868317802,0.2801481248963384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929427800951634,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Harshdeep2004,2020/04/16,"I force myself to look at the bad side of things Well, for some reason even though I may know that a particular situation doesn’t have any negative side for me whatsoever. Even if I am 100% sure that it’s positive or whatever, my brain just makes me look at the bad side of things. Like my brain wants me to be sad and depressed. I believe that I am an optimist because even though how bad a situation might be, I look at the good side and forget the bad side. But lately, even if I try to look on the good side of things, even after a bit my brain just starts overthinking the situation, imagining the bad side and the negative effects. 

For example, the most recent event of time doing this was today. I was just texting my girlfriend and she just casually said that I remind her a lot about her ex. I said cool and didn’t think much. Even though I know that she likes me more than him, but my brain is like overthinking what she said and basically forcing myself to be sad and think that I’m not good enough and she is only with me because I remind her of her ex. Idk why I do this but it’s annoying and ruins my day easily.",4.385167394468707,4.958929991266377,5.461816593886463,83.09566521106261,70.04803493449782,9.250771470160117,26.18369723435226,9.3871,1.9013857933042209,884,25,190,18,15,293,110,229,0.14300000000000002,0.74,0.11699999999999999,-0.8074,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,1,16,20,1,0,14,1,16,4,4,4,1,38,31,19,0,3,11,2,0,3,1,2,0,3,0,0,14,10,0,0,7,1,0,0,5,10,1,0,6,8,35,10,20,20,7,19,0,4,4,0,15,11,0,8,11,138,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06051688466496344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3715185508859688,0.108496091028236,0.0,0.0,0.10026230501831826,0.0,0.0,0.09715504813216087,0.0,0.0,0.3973732399661072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057391788417149814,0.0,0.07664775841476854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09195142043134323,0.0,0.3526660235353049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22392411216688554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781417665612777,0.0,0.10038564626698046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304294212481152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29891987618745314,0.0,0.0,0.07565690713527115,0.0,0.0,0.059402137425125824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09440531460200607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541857366509438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06768161306112211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0914974984199665,0.0878678083525727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539522621124184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3000886048349056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06298823894971713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387289924198456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17736486073116095,0.11404359049390625,0.2622994134364906,0.0,0.051891327474403684,0.0,0.08435299709010152,0.0,0.0,0.0604190005868518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05248915674107635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001353429187351,0.0,0.0803004735151309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wt_anonymous,2020/04/16,"What was this experience? This may be hard to put into words, but let me explain. 

About a year ago I went through a very difficult time. It seemed everything decided to go wrong at the exact perfect time. My second semester of school was just starting, but I had to get my wisdom teeth surgery done. It took me about two weeks to recover and everything went downhill from there. My english teacher, to be blunt, was god awful. I won't go into specifics, but she made it impossible for me to pass. Also, I had an argument with my dad at this time, which resulted in what I thought might be the moment in time he left me for good. 

All of this accumulated into 5 horrid months or so. I felt awful, every day and every hour. By the end of the semester, I had given up on basically all of my classes, barely getting by in many of them. I had no drive, no energy, no creativity. Nothing. I felt like a different person. My day consisted of waking up, going to school, not paying attention or doing any work most of the day, going home, and going on my phone until I fell asleep or ate dinner, if I could stay up that long.

This was also the closest I ever got to thoughts of self harm. I didnt actually self harm, but it was a much closer possibility than ever before. Normally, whenever my brain thinks of something like that, I immediately shut it down. But during this period, I would think for quite a few minutes at a time thoughts of self harm. 

I had practically abandoned any of my hobbies. I really enjoy video games, and I couldn't even bring myself to do such a simple thing.

Overall, I felt completely devoid of any drive. I just couldn't do anything. I was taking a graphic design class at the time, and every day in that class I pretty much just stared at the screen... I couldn't think of what to do, it was like my mind turned off and couldn't turn back on. It was like this in every class, even math-and I'm pretty good at math compared to other subjects.

This eventually subsided by around the end of June or July. I would really like to know why I was like this, is there a name for it, etc.",4.265394562334215,5.260265990384621,5.6054442970822285,80.42403846153847,70.58653846153845,8.622546419098143,26.60444297082229,8.939507131559953,1.9542724801061009,1636,51,325,30,29,550,209,416,0.15,0.762,0.08800000000000001,-0.9783,1,0,1,0,0,0,60.0,0,0,1,3,17,17,0,0,19,2,35,6,4,2,6,62,67,20,0,9,14,1,4,6,0,5,0,0,1,4,26,11,2,1,14,2,1,14,10,6,0,2,29,6,42,11,63,24,7,68,0,1,2,0,12,27,0,9,32,228,68,9,0.0,0.0,0.07751488678550847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041232300657575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270446519727441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16205094207792256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06536636920102236,0.07071197097734278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06107886676444468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759140326887976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867319736407621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08328370679437122,0.0,0.0,0.06342057190775388,0.0,0.0,0.2049101598014115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299029711320385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812872618892774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407076449088614,0.0,0.0885884917462666,0.1049291388660773,0.1437029049285576,0.2677020058446461,0.0,0.1427780328759984,0.07770045250191035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2288036343605029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300064657800185,0.0,0.22571725672447035,0.13324881158374496,0.06352961100266569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07115612446593575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07967750537064062,0.0,0.07822523916521043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0436541514087522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630389424627834,0.0812253488010937,0.0,0.23284091930101405,0.0,0.0,0.07029546700508567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516117032496616,0.0,0.08053232139852692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842655745478522,0.08020441420992917,0.0,0.06340244775622789,0.0,0.11678439332001403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07782721085156244,0.0762178473518564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693575965226668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08954846879797604,0.0,0.16162328726522604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07985183375033386,0.0,0.08448648659283824,0.0,0.0,0.10177328246548742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1607803282168454,0.0,0.07231257468061883,0.24859698504508804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06115119677089879,0.0,0.0,0.05622289557777215,0.08466472199022572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059723527908288464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05277157667489154,0.15269185930340792,0.0,0.1891821461937777,0.2779071840679057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825268643887102,0.0,0.17280000248478355,0.07759423579810193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06554032163808209,0.0,0.0,0.06371614520275083,0.0,0.0,0.14726987419254275,0.07167568442246687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057827973937728525,0.0,0.0,0.1128534656060192,0.08684722138469585,0.0,0.05115207422119936
mentalhealth,lostgirl091,2020/04/16,"I don’t wanna be self centred anymore I’ve done an awful thing to some who trusted and loved me, and it’s gonna fuck with them for life they say they can’t be with me but for some reason still love me, I only thought of myself and not his feelings I’ve done this before with someone who loved me and I don’t know why I do the things I do. I don’t want to nor do I intentionally hurt people, but the fact of the matter is I do and I need to grow and reflect so I can stop this and not inflict pain on people ever again. How do I stop being so self centred and selfish, it’s not that I like to see people hurt or anything it’s just I always save myself rather than saving the other person how do I begin to change?",2.385868814729577,2.9048718101265862,4.2016915995397,90.52173187571924,74.56962025316456,5.998619102416573,21.958573072497124,4.851557810540192,-0.03567848101265847,558,12,129,1,11,190,87,158,0.10400000000000001,0.6990000000000001,0.198,0.9511,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,3,0,9,12,1,0,5,1,17,6,0,4,2,39,29,16,0,4,8,0,1,1,0,1,2,1,0,3,11,11,0,2,5,0,0,1,8,5,0,0,3,3,24,7,15,22,2,8,0,2,1,4,13,1,1,3,7,98,35,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12403321834771967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14783146796750227,0.0,0.0,0.12266699968340672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12684251465591592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15768998378945048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3050885233589212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483695368764875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537125494288846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13780729832369584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3191522648553685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192169524620073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528833623111113,0.07282515796042026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4036083341675494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11052909313051644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336991566073105,0.15861464298072284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3100266987620012,0.13015696564885468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532626545066492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11854170358302955,0.0,0.0,0.11878473646800235,0.0,0.3110125962179007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12630147308048106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1190427308634474,0.24924841572457976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980630424603895,0.0,0.0,0.11834019313454225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08792182992838468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13450710611323338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,redditlolololol,2020/04/16,"Do I have a medical disorder? I’m going to try my best to explain this but it’s kinda hard to explain. Sometimes I feel like my mind is two separate things. Like for example I’ll just be sitting on my phone and then my mind will be like “if you don’t sing this song then bad things will happen to you” and then I have to sing it or I’ll be doing something and it’ll be like “if you don’t stop right now you’ll lose all ur friends”. Another example of my mind being weird is I’ll be praying and my mind will start picturing all these super dirty things because it knows it shouldn’t while praying and the excuse I use is “sorry God, my brain is trying to frustrate me”. I said that out loud once which is when I realized there might be a problem, because I was referring to my brain and myself as two different things. I looked up symptoms for schizophrenia and multiple personality disorder but I don’t think I match to either of those. I think at least, maybe I’m wrong. Does anyone know if I have a medical disorder?",3.6555183413078174,4.694846736842108,4.8621818181818215,85.01993939393941,72.0622009569378,8.44414673046252,27.808931419457736,8.841846274778883,1.9989117065390751,804,29,169,15,15,266,111,209,0.17300000000000001,0.674,0.152,-0.6021,1,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,4,0,3,4,13,1,0,4,0,28,5,2,1,2,37,43,19,0,5,8,0,2,4,1,7,3,3,0,1,15,8,0,1,9,3,0,1,4,6,0,2,2,6,26,7,17,27,5,15,2,1,1,0,12,5,0,6,12,116,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156881157564685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714362817619863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921189435976848,0.1345093706110385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157820170499092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24632419425875826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11526886745592126,0.3793349884489627,0.0,0.0965484325169588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055784953157602964,0.07881806460500508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523883561819634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627017216540308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756233865575764,0.0,0.09883186547160848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212663351662006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21560198399750252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0926474033028524,0.1234283717115343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11083891043811507,0.0,0.0,0.22228691433672515,0.0,0.11704015627759505,0.4455977294952101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11749530092987885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963338110445271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10556861999054856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09421917370129457,0.10494681918417698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493558211679439,0.10911682455833006,0.1235027235698488,0.0780904482062786,0.0,0.0,0.09223881973531046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467262753339913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2931870393899461,0.1413869516788963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14981040634487702,0.0,0.21554808194877226,0.0,0.0,0.0952876293791828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12062591891980134,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Coredintol71,2020/04/16,"Yay.. I'm banging my head against a goddamn wall, hoping my life will get better as the quality sinks and sinks and sinks. My arms are fucking sore from crawling and clawing my way out. 

Goddammit drugs and alcohol sound so good, but I can't break my vow of sobriety.",4.091153846153849,5.668803500000003,4.456923076923079,86.26307692307695,71.69230769230771,7.507692307692308,32.230769230769226,8.07648339933343,2.330907692307693,210,10,41,3,4,66,42,52,0.07400000000000001,0.809,0.11699999999999999,0.3125,0,0,2,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,1,5,1,0,2,1,3,7,2,0,0,7,7,7,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,1,4,1,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,6,4,5,6,0,4,0,0,0,1,0,2,1,1,0,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37164395364293135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075607211035028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4032849802372927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3214935631317632,0.18168744754071567,0.0,0.0,0.29168009482592144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3568965901821901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34539882587310805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456293881594414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760314483849577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wtfamidoingtothis_,2020/04/16,"I feel like I'm always close to have a anxiety attack especially at night I overthink to the point I can't breathe My dad is in a psych ward, my brother is in a psych ward getting moved to rtc, my abusive mother is at home alone with my cat. I feel like I always annoy my boyfriend (whom I live with) I feel needy and pathetic when I talk about everything. Nothing is happening to me I'm okay, I shouldn't be feeling the way I do. I'm just a insecure person who makes everything about themselves, and I'm going to inevitably loose everyone because I'm selfish and constantly looking for validation.",4.060690943043884,5.5303170672268935,5.333053221288517,80.3774696545285,71.60504201680672,8.650233426704013,32.54995331465919,9.150863307647796,2.968024463118581,477,23,91,10,9,159,72,119,0.245,0.6970000000000001,0.057,-0.9669,0,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,2,1,6,1,9,1,1,1,0,13,23,4,0,1,1,3,4,2,0,1,0,0,1,1,2,6,0,0,4,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,0,5,16,3,14,21,0,12,0,0,1,0,7,6,0,0,5,52,18,2,0.0,0.21605709221159355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18886149449923367,0.0,0.0,0.3034626497598178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13949864570038353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2074515241599237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11115997895108264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19705753930786324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17424498167233052,0.3277721213249114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3688102436650544,0.26054435799251097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527130137672683,0.0,0.10363474347692356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1612531151120028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18291374682191827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17817577982932925,0.0,0.16102000080813986,0.0,0.15312960508600254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172125803330268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1938111296362849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17112483330935374,0.0,0.17497149250566435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592225784618818,0.0,0.0,0.17238141433017504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14656748819874754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14474238955139945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iris_skye_xxx,2020/04/16,Ok like wtf... I was crying! Like bawling my eyes out crying but I was laughing hysterically at the same time but felt kinda numb it just all happened for no reason...idk what’s going on with me today...can someone help me explain what’s going on...,0.0880102040816304,2.408035836734694,2.4518112244897985,88.39363520408165,98.79591836734691,3.266326530612245,18.369897959183675,5.148860815047168,-0.2702877551020415,192,6,36,1,8,65,39,49,0.168,0.599,0.233,0.5692,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,2,2,1,0,1,10,7,2,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,1,1,0,0,3,2,5,4,6,4,2,7,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,1,3,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6279496001678827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2744450913545413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248916564556315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2527617183181184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1915882444082041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792877287427966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2938845577342773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24218589112218836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16667187724699398,0.0,0.27093684167845633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soomanytomatoes,2020/04/16,"Online counseling services? Hi there,

I was wondering if there were any free or insurance taking, legitimate online mental health or counseling services anyone knew of. 

I have a regular mental health provider right now but it's super new and I have some things I'm not comfortable addressing with him at the moment and thought finding someone online would help me remove some of that fear and help me get some of it out and processed. Honestly, a free place where I could maintain some anonymity would be wonderful, but I don't know that such a place exists. 

Thing is, a Google search gives me lots of sketch results so I figured I'd see if reddit had any recommendations. I have medicaid and am in the state of Washington, but I also could afford to pay a little bit for something like this as my issue is starting to interfere with my day to day life.

Thank you for your time!",6.944545454545455,7.529027242424243,6.792878787878788,75.7493181818182,64.45454545454545,9.993939393939394,32.86363636363636,9.888512548439397,3.1905272727272718,705,27,124,14,10,223,110,165,0.052000000000000005,0.754,0.193,0.9807,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,2,0,1,7,8,0,1,7,0,15,3,0,1,0,34,27,15,0,6,8,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,1,0,7,8,0,1,7,0,3,1,2,1,0,0,5,1,16,9,16,17,6,17,0,0,1,0,7,8,0,11,8,86,23,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11886912752517904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20216360993633006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039340944864805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227880336764042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23735743087996905,0.0,0.0,0.19172386667535132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16726381953381525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13585629379232608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07765942359281283,0.14259115932372285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31599945247466554,0.0,0.0,0.19926349011483271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15514385647034265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168987533491304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499039399869796,0.0726190791969479,0.14897855151304445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12637029770915545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2995927881659501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14355957978102174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105989605298251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12693964146386627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11844860246848507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259440684125597,0.11443204093056605,0.0,0.0,0.1052097265094294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11176044870754573,0.0,0.0,0.13684978303951406,0.0,0.0,0.19750256874467173,0.0,0.0,0.11800531709234402,0.0866744722955581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223922881633701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111823329274543,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,part-time-gay,2020/04/16,"I just looked at my body and nearly cried. I hate the idea of my body changing, and now that I can’t go to the gym and am doing less physical activity my body is less nice. I just looked at myself and thought „you don’t deserve affection“. Then I worked out in the middle of the night.

I have a tendency to view myself as less a person than a resource. Like I am as valuable as my utility, and any time I get worse at something I feel like I’m less. I don’t know, this situation has been a perfect storm for destroying my mental health, this is just what happened an hour ago.",2.820666666666668,3.9315937333333366,4.3599999999999985,87.55166666666668,74.16666666666666,7.666666666666668,25.833333333333336,8.167268648758528,1.4065833333333329,448,15,99,7,9,150,74,120,0.106,0.75,0.14400000000000002,0.5729,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,4,7,2,0,9,0,11,4,3,1,1,15,21,9,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,4,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,4,17,5,15,19,4,14,0,0,3,0,1,7,0,0,8,70,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15596732540035815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11965070381284235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5863158385593599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18612970126090214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932706650598376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889646179741548,0.12569731818607535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09192559129218318,0.0,0.09999532844480624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559027472252432,0.0,0.0,0.17371226736175102,0.0,0.1870245436603274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732733818519496,0.0,0.0,0.19862392583284946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09669644384846536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191865418097488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2955040875574298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731424548956806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16511532076732374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15363104587285503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.197772974013748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13545340074204618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13968309378926705,0.10259671971663342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1280922719670367,0.0,0.17930608906338188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,msiikeab,2020/04/16,"Your cures for loneliness Hey there,
Since all this social isolation is still going strong how about a little conversation.
What do you, redditors, do to feel better when that loneliness comes creeping back?

I scream. As in I put on some heavy music and scream along. That makes me feel better.

What about you?",3.650753246753244,6.839418490909092,3.136103896103897,86.57272727272729,82.27272727272728,6.779220779220778,18.766233766233768,7.957251820313856,1.0561688311688306,247,6,43,5,7,73,45,55,0.209,0.655,0.135,-0.6072,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,3,0,3,7,5,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,2,1,9,8,4,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,5,3,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,2,0,0,0,4,6,3,8,8,2,9,0,0,0,0,6,3,0,1,3,31,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23584887032747884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5425381123252077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2642122589732076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31017385760215954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17431613529173465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3074141785881946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047380885150544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3083384774675775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537220859032157,0.0,0.0,0.3126625769302511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2449471159753792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ratquestionthrowaway,2020/04/16,"Whats wrong with me? Every now and then i have delusions and hallucinations. They’re not super often but the last ones i remember seeing are:
a red feather that wasn’t there
a mosquito that wasn’t there, 
stinkbugs that weren’t actually there climb out of my ceiling fan and fly at me (the ceiling fan looked like it was missing the actual fan parts and the middle part was distorted, but after the hallucination it was back to normal)
and most recently a delusion that a tune i heard in a dream was cursed and that i was going to die because i heard it. 
I’ve told my psychiatrist about most of these but she just says “okay” and moves on without another word on the topic. It doesn’t happen often enough to be a huge problem but i’m just concerned. My grandpa had schizophrenia but i don't think that’s what it is because i was never diagnosed and i don't hallucinate too much. I’m also a minor if that makes a difference",3.1855978260869584,5.177748755434788,4.542826086956524,82.9755434782609,75.03260869565217,7.42608695652174,25.630434782608692,8.278499904357787,1.6885065217391304,737,26,144,13,16,244,110,184,0.11900000000000001,0.773,0.10800000000000001,-0.4539,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,12,6,0,0,14,1,17,1,0,1,1,31,29,16,1,3,10,1,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,15,10,0,0,2,1,0,3,9,3,0,1,13,6,14,3,14,15,6,17,0,1,3,0,6,7,0,5,8,109,29,0,0.0,0.0,0.34488074822958104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14131238671665725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18529251678221045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13587664346995273,0.0,0.21543768474694736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17935371103382047,0.18339378932305356,0.18462102539990985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18258539030467244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14888312411158938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042656271029622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15626126464656245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14403964977763875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633003048089971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14838923098600254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11795318001418666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18781139327763896,0.1298998509189396,0.0,0.13628719958409635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17313517328213535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11974112003725824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3827125501005391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16908456986585324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17447667483559592,0.0,0.20017438948047386,0.0,0.0,0.1405243623246603,0.0,0.0,0.14081246381259624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322660043965088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885094700665895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17033907664423065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19320117679907087,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Luisd3lToro,2020/04/16,"How did i suppose to get friends right now? Well,  i'm a adolescent right now and I feel like I waste all my life cause' I never really have friends, all of that are for interest of my smartness or for make fun of me, and I see that make me lose myself, now I'm very bad ,my family seems doesn't matter about my mental health. But I have seen new people and I want to know them, but all the past damage make me unable to talk to them, can advice me for so it?",2.3880952380952394,3.0133029898989925,3.871168831168834,92.49818181818183,74.65656565656566,7.273304473304473,20.203463203463198,7.447530270364453,0.2499887445887441,352,6,85,4,7,117,63,99,0.113,0.7390000000000001,0.14800000000000002,0.1472,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,2,1,7,10,0,0,2,0,6,2,0,5,4,20,18,8,0,1,3,0,1,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,2,3,18,7,11,16,3,8,0,2,2,0,5,2,0,2,7,56,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19289470668833075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16481879902637195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027817703329292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18608894391014627,0.0,0.09981018696147548,0.1410209262333141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30501788162821586,0.0,0.1031321289558334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20982447959867448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10848459037759202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13942780350483525,0.09643852470064727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22083748680534135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39529340836389854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989304107211268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522452429387344,0.19064788804576974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18843840045959376,0.1368506812928069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264579942955643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3371530425386855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730037617158665,0.17970341399886114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1586607601157253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628737409083495,0.1164302530161749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17748420094222653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Strange_Context,2020/04/16,"is it pathetic or understandable? When I went to my old school, my classmates used to make fun of me, they always did it behind my back, when I didn't see them but I certainly realized how they treated me and what they said about me.  I used to go to the bathrooms to cry or sometimes I cried in public, sometimes I did not even go to school and I lied to my parents and teachers saying that I was sick, I almost missed the course and had to repeat subjects but I always tried to pretend that I was fine.  

I taught people that I was weak and I'm really ashamed of that",2.9438461538461524,4.236532102564105,4.103931623931627,88.79384615384619,74.12820512820512,6.90940170940171,24.96581196581197,7.3871296695380915,1.0223606837606842,444,14,95,5,9,145,67,117,0.23600000000000002,0.705,0.057999999999999996,-0.9741,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,4,0,6,7,0,1,2,0,8,2,0,4,1,18,20,12,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,7,5,0,0,2,1,0,3,2,3,0,0,10,3,24,4,14,10,0,9,0,1,1,0,8,1,0,3,5,70,31,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18234087431804288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30303365155394785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14001907422214158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4000434976580886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027139386537584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20697647482169454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12154918347535018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19107705999436045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021938783702165,0.0,0.0,0.12624107726486353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11665410268925795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17321312800901673,0.14480848669702992,0.0,0.3685777733381207,0.1451053714492039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36019131684191336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1236298979474472,0.0,0.0,0.18956631408760286,0.0,0.3145415644540207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16880299633567195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Thr0wAwaY0809ac,2020/04/16,"Why do I keep re-doing things until they feel ""just right?"" Ever since I was a child, I've always felt a need to re-do some things. They would be totally random actions, such as flipping the light switch ""in a right way"" or stepping ""properly."" 

If I don't do whatever I feel the urge to do, nothing bad happens, I just feel uncomfortable for a bit (similar to being itchy). I don't  particularly want to do it either, I just feel like I have to. Lately, this has been getting in my way much more than usual, and I don't think this is normal? I've never been diagnosed with anything relevant to mental health, though then again, I've never been checked out either. 

Should I have any concerns?",3.932941176470589,5.197191117647058,5.071352941176472,82.92658823529412,71.6470588235294,7.792941176470588,26.1,8.238735603445708,1.6097288235294118,536,17,106,8,10,177,87,136,0.034,0.917,0.049,0.4312,0,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,2,0,7,2,0,0,6,0,19,2,0,0,4,28,30,7,0,6,7,0,5,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,6,0,1,2,5,1,0,0,5,6,13,1,14,21,7,17,0,0,0,0,3,5,0,4,9,76,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14251847033911988,0.0,0.0,0.1164761013116078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409486377025049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14301143428550933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18699312252812156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17384533767347962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1549323370040873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34641674561362457,0.1223622853948252,0.16445541725652674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0894865984342715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15146211450647984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820623615320464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152241308856486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932110149019864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367863265167537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1726096994292608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12591032165751712,0.12700176203418598,0.2642029997115856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16781778580936946,0.16434753657227166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29254393595882106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14168437657571392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2275813061871245,0.10974914582804196,0.16828148167543286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18864044296862864,0.0,0.10102523241540966,0.27190778131570803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15455333069934918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167221792797782,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Deaths_spooky,2020/04/16,not sure if this fits here but still quite often I get quite sad over things happening in my life but no matter much I feel I should I don't cry. I've been like this for a long period of time but no matter how sad I am I don't cry. anyone know why or is there something wrong with me,1.2342187500000037,2.1915502343750006,2.8613750000000024,97.34612500000004,77.90625,6.370000000000001,15.925,6.742157984588678,-0.6371837500000002,221,2,57,2,5,73,48,64,0.27,0.569,0.161,-0.8806,0,0,1,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,2,5,5,0,0,1,0,6,1,0,1,1,15,10,6,0,2,6,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,1,1,8,2,5,8,1,7,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,3,5,37,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16290109417837867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5118228045548754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11779883994186954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1217194909816335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20601846313637565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12803661917777784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1645566851292643,0.11381950762026348,0.0,0.0,0.2061749833270088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17126296595957424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4955938329103286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17935504964714935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860536302580089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2195755835544184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15477781718554595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358492268012841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21022312917680636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2547208971481942,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Henrique_MDOL,2020/04/16,"Sad , but true . **This may be triggering**

​

 By the end of last year I've been really happy (I was going to sleep wanting to wake up fast so I could draw again ... I was drawing for several hours a day , everyday) for 1 month , I've never felt so energized and euphoric , after this period of more or less than 1 month I was feeling really down and when I was going to bed at that time I didn't want to wake up never again ... I feel like that type of thing (this ""boost"" in my mood) comes and goes , but after it's over , I come down to what I think it's the ""normal"" for me , being really depressed . And I feel like there's so many underlying problems , but I feel like nobody gives a damn , and I think ""but why they should give a damn when you don't give a damn about people outside of your close family ?"" As the years gone by I feel like my mental health is declining , I became bitter , envious of successful people , and besides my best efforts of doing something with the only thing I know how to do (drawing) and that still gives me some pleasure , I feel like I'll never be able to live off  of it . I'm afraid that when my mother dies I'll  die too .

And I feel like nothing can be done , since I feel like my soul already left my body ... I don't even know why I'm posting this here . I don't have any friends ...

When I was 15/16 ,  I was really active , had friends , girls , was ""popular"" in school . But all of the sudden I was feeling that my surroundings became strange , and I was thinking that I did or would do things that I would never do , like eating things you are not supposed to (rocks , coin , screws , paint , metal nails , and behaving not accordingly to my normal pattern of how I acted , so because I was so overwhelmed by all this , I decided to smoke weed for the first time (turns out it was skunk) , and that was the worst thing I've felt in my entire life , and the sensation of being trapped in dream lasted for several months ... Since then I feel like what I was before smoking died , and now feel like I'm a man without a soul and without any purpose .

Some of the things I spoken here are not in chronological order , I just took clonazepam ...

Does anyone feel like that too ? It's very strange , it all seems like a trip , and nothing makes sense (human life in general)",4.851791208791209,5.044942843956047,5.452115384615387,84.91663461538462,68.91208791208791,8.521978021978024,27.23901098901099,8.306716005460428,1.5934725274725272,1754,50,369,23,28,567,214,455,0.12300000000000001,0.705,0.172,0.9804,0,1,2,0,0,0,88.0,0,3,1,4,23,34,6,2,16,0,40,9,4,4,8,79,77,35,3,9,13,1,14,12,2,4,3,0,1,3,28,20,1,0,21,2,1,8,13,12,0,1,22,15,48,21,52,45,9,60,2,3,0,1,14,18,4,6,44,246,76,3,0.06065528839384194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693461903189815,0.0,0.0,0.06571997963321592,0.07370281445067269,0.08249535213255715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04241158795067529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036974900822853325,0.0,0.05161318295007525,0.0,0.06365398303542405,0.0,0.0,0.06737435164959786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449832033003408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04842831221674612,0.0,0.0,0.03911764312721707,0.0,0.052242311014551325,0.0,0.18885183935332586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05307985162222651,0.062071419093227075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062065502636248215,0.0,0.0,0.05372258207353277,0.0,0.0,0.04006224593048354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057180407715287915,0.0,0.3680296355930969,0.4333215014806037,0.11647717775501942,0.0,0.0,0.05159335732203351,0.0,0.0,0.09372425070226784,0.0,0.0,0.23274431838855236,0.06894359639177987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06456868237574942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06447373519349715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05973324099051972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06666912045684935,0.09888431118896313,0.0,0.0,0.06590214831488787,0.0,0.0856852479651139,0.35559732110725634,0.0,0.05355973090816015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040487875998922826,0.0614949422073941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061126264424909274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452434175322758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18712439075699944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188586085776748,0.11640077019213133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04613108005549151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410147951848271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058090999610964464,0.0,0.0,0.05803891931727904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542932365007986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061386390085866924,0.0,0.05521829650043921,0.0,0.13704642208722298,0.0,0.10034936270768292,0.0,0.060699092917717815,0.0,0.0,0.04669540435485562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048439391662952316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24178007052022335,0.11659637894871833,0.0,0.0,0.07073717287871492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06739025720305288,0.0,0.06597553616797701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05004696526060408,0.07155212123804221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1094639268976951,0.0,0.0,0.1169390670452994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08617555317948693,0.0,0.07370281445067269,0.07812003412777635
mentalhealth,Muffinmiffin554355,2020/04/16,"Childhood worry When I was around 7-8 my stepmother would come to my mother's home to pick up me and my brother to go to their house. Sometimes my to moms would talk leaving me and my brother in the car. Then the car would start driving itself. It would loop around the neighborhood and park where it was before it started moving. Then my parents would stop talking, my stepmom would then start driving the car as if nothing happened. I would ask my brother if he remembers, but were not on speaking terms as of now.

I want to know what happened because this happened many, many times. More than 10 if I recall correctly. I can't find anything online that matches up quite right without it being very worrisome. I would love some help with this!",4.155892018779344,6.2534515140845075,4.0658450704225375,86.98895539906107,72.59154929577466,6.141784037558686,30.143192488262912,6.816661863887847,1.6726178403755867,593,26,108,5,12,181,91,142,0.052000000000000005,0.87,0.079,0.7139,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,1,5,1,0,0,4,0,13,1,0,1,1,29,25,13,0,12,6,6,0,0,0,8,0,1,1,0,9,7,0,1,3,0,0,8,3,0,0,0,3,1,17,1,18,13,3,28,0,0,0,1,14,8,0,4,12,77,26,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09434174746675077,0.20411385825346848,0.1071761004583497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06988555071946545,0.0,0.09755308694759557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875513528098197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10478198790246064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06515448446371618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30413633201003537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684305241879733,0.0,0.11499667462545997,0.0,0.0,0.13228308780158207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06300501279816209,0.0,0.0,0.12139080420553724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10347014175446467,0.0,0.0,0.2324608210967363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13426896096213595,0.0,0.1218477878279732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1100034313549686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12729792521860026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12193736442638313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12986862038744507,0.09790483462283907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338525104053067,0.0,0.2434355593532669,0.0,0.0,0.0958470132695226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1842920397609245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06684948671872516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09459280893901713,0.06761964584873033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11051214363271668,0.0,0.0,0.1164259345594358,0.0,0.6515150394973559,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Dragon-Marshmello,2020/04/16,Any one else feel like they’re faking a breakdown because they ignore it? Any one just feel like their head is a constant low level breakdown that you just tune out and continue with your day? I’m just so tired of it because I feel like it’s not bad enough to be considered bad since I’m not crying and planning my death (I physically can’t cry). Nothing feels fun anymore and even the stuff I laugh at in the moment holds no emotional value after I react. Not even pain in any form has a release anymore. Sorry if you wasted your time reading this... I just needed to get it out and pretend I’m less lonely.,5.774494773519166,5.508930723577241,6.228710801393727,81.70243902439027,66.96747967479675,8.329384436701512,30.579558652729386,7.447530270364453,1.8537558652729391,481,16,95,4,7,156,82,123,0.198,0.62,0.182,-0.3301,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,4,2,1,7,12,0,0,5,0,4,3,1,1,0,23,13,6,1,2,8,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,0,0,7,7,0,2,4,2,0,0,5,7,0,2,0,4,12,5,10,12,3,13,0,2,0,0,6,7,0,1,9,59,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3005870814607254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2922417476039341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24604411928469155,0.17963319125797547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15922130870001686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32369033802025193,0.09502158103274068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1230829774427282,0.16573674444256056,0.0,0.1522407575816471,0.0,0.1946322755518144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29799646268078034,0.31577741556867656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697863953866425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15121250444148854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21594744060071475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1092501338911174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137591548031372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19968168096832267,0.0,0.15677927405297248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14737905052202124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12188049097310667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649341474361408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866810873317015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08591465982321804,0.1693447111570455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flawless_facts,2020/04/16,Is this bad? I am 19 and my chest hearts all the time. Like I have to grip under my armpit because myheart feels like it is going to explode. It has gotten worse with this virus. Especially since now I’m on the brink of homelessness,1.6089361702127647,3.9455009574468094,2.637702127659576,92.89400000000002,81.97872340425532,5.4621276595744686,20.038297872340426,6.742157984588678,0.1864672340425529,183,5,39,2,5,58,38,47,0.128,0.775,0.09699999999999999,-0.3818,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,5,3,3,0,1,4,9,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,2,6,8,1,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,24,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3255114306874363,0.2376511060509282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1971216690507004,0.27851145455639803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2215627570731492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4619783347173379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38092550527164665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32249088582066776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22732674056493996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3972940743408297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dyingeasylivinghard,2020/04/16,"My 16 year old daughter talks about killing and hurting herself I have a 16 year old daughter who has been struggling with mental health issues for the past couple years. She went to therapy in 2017 when she 13. Her therapist met with her almost every week and even prescribed her with medication. She also told me to call 911 or take my daughter to the emergency room if things got out of hand. My daughter eventually ended up quitting therapy in August of 2017. 

Since she quit, she has not shown any signs of improvement. She still talks about wanting to commit suicide or harm herself. One time, I saw somewhat old cuts on my daughter's thigh and she insisted that she slipped and fell into a fence at school. However, later on I saw fresh cuts on her thigh and she admitted to self harming. When I tried talking to her about it, she got defensive and told me that I cannot say anything about it until I try it first. If I tell her to do something she doesn't want to do, she'll sometimes say, ""I'd rather get raped."" which is a strange and offensive response. 

Since my daughter is going to be applying to colleges in the fall, she says she has plans to end her life in college. I am at my wits end. I'm having her go back to therapy this month, but during the meantime, I don't know how to handle this.",5.496230544747082,5.945226743190662,5.6883827821011685,82.88876094357978,67.56031128404669,8.603988326848249,32.01580739299611,8.472884824447931,2.3509612840466927,1031,41,203,14,16,327,149,257,0.091,0.871,0.038,-0.8855,1,0,1,0,0,2,26.0,0,0,0,4,12,10,6,1,7,0,16,7,3,1,1,30,33,17,2,5,7,6,1,0,0,1,3,3,1,1,10,12,0,2,2,0,0,5,4,10,0,2,9,6,41,0,37,22,1,39,0,1,2,1,44,13,0,6,21,134,51,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510812649965104,0.0,0.0,0.08394114434391357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138037064820528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08637794267038834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08071225182366366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718185854876013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11614270550414148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2789057362474608,0.0,0.0,0.0693289473793007,0.0,0.0884382473596038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928388990241387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05484031910715087,0.0,0.11930901164850802,0.0,0.1679015421579971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11157377952132656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236810270061053,0.0,0.0,0.10955706600344904,0.0,0.0,0.11612915000329074,0.0,0.057686480583209035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414047701748526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574204085752703,0.10578087851493068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08378273207446388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3304319758504306,0.0,0.07112756973741345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020177143507604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22328818273188025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504191470217442,0.0,0.10623103396282628,0.0,0.0,0.10950226334390596,0.0,0.0,0.17365765510948575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080783181727826,0.10381389975311067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382585543290398,0.0,0.0,0.1097330865201193,0.0,0.11481559234080595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892124853792236,0.2531026985273149,0.09174477073747192,0.0,0.36011275779261986,0.1218734305090364,0.06973464000473335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06120642543079876,0.0,0.0,0.2005987167099733,0.0,0.14252983047491513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12382314403434393,0.0,0.08419726542521916,0.0,0.0,0.097304385309807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027836786052254
mentalhealth,dylan520,2020/04/16,"I need help I guess it started when my mom passed from cancer, but it’s just recently I’ve noticed that I just don’t want to live this life anymore, I feel like I just let everyone down, and I just don’t have any motivation to do anything I need to. I find myself just kind of having conversations with myself in my head, and thinking about what would happen if I just disappeared. It’s been 8 years since my mom passed, and I barely remember her, but yet she was such a big part of my life, I think when it happened I blocked everything I felt out to the point were I forgot her entirely, and it’s tearing me apart, it doesn’t help that my dad doesn’t believe in mental health, and won’t listen to me.",4.5210426179604255,4.646265061643838,5.365433789954341,85.48862252663626,69.61643835616438,8.680669710806697,27.86605783866057,8.515128840125781,1.6977665144596652,553,17,121,8,9,181,88,146,0.057999999999999996,0.8440000000000001,0.099,0.6705,0,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,1,11,2,0,0,2,0,13,5,1,1,0,30,26,10,0,5,9,3,2,1,0,2,4,1,0,0,10,7,0,2,7,0,0,3,5,0,0,0,5,3,26,2,14,18,1,16,0,0,0,0,10,7,0,2,7,84,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10817476434199652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1577571898182825,0.0,0.0,0.1309031251570095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1792202503117484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15200060402007648,0.14296411851911547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043184266749802,0.11364143577850172,0.1527345593315852,0.0,0.14538939594509998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1752363081535629,0.0,0.2813345975522639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1632542917749282,0.16908664380504784,0.0,0.0,0.2132459060453507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656495445824081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16266242304712591,0.2247152419282465,0.07771479527237042,0.0,0.1404639441965463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16030767984713032,0.0,0.0,0.3726076116561773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235900507045856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18110511150290695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1722600311476239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15037494250075426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15706491691384575,0.0,0.1801981490170863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13158642738236226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11259234414371412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20385448779612786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382509017790472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11300054992496007,0.0,0.0,0.10243748361219322
mentalhealth,ThrowRAwhatinthewhat,2020/04/16,"It seems like I'm just not trying I was struggling in school before the virus. I had a 60% in biology. I've never gotten below a 75% in a course before. It felt horrible. And now? I'm doing even worse.

My best is so much worse than it used to be. The virus is taking such a huge emotional toll on me, and there's little room in my mind for schoolwork. My biology course is so much harder than I ever imagined it would be; there's such a huge leap from the 11th grade to the 12th. I'm not capable of what I used to be, and I wasn't capable of much before.

I was so lost before the virus. For the first unit test, I studied for hours. I made cue cards, and I made my friends quiz me. I did practice questions. I just didn't understand. I asked my teacher for help, and tried my hardest to understand. It just didn't work. And now, I have to build on the concepts I didn't understand in the first place. I just can't keep up.

But my teachers just see a kid who's turning in shit assignments. A kid who has a nearly empty practice log for music class. A kid who isn't doing enough.

I'm still drawing and posting art. I'm drawing most of the time. The only time I don't draw is when I'm crying, because I can't see the paper through tears. It doesn't take any emotional or mental energy. My therapist encourages it because it's a really good outlet. It's a coping mechanism for me, but it just seems lazy. At the end of the day, I'm choosing art over schoolwork.

I just feel empty and useless. I'm a waste of space, of oxygen, of fucking toilet paper. I'm not enough.",1.2275762329640116,3.072064486322187,3.290065692714972,90.37718894009217,80.42857142857143,6.190450044121972,21.859103833709188,7.233258080335977,0.6652524953426804,1212,37,265,16,31,411,152,329,0.105,0.825,0.071,-0.9036,0,0,0,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,0,5,20,10,2,1,25,0,25,2,1,4,2,41,55,15,0,1,13,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,3,14,8,0,1,10,2,0,0,13,5,0,2,13,4,29,5,35,38,7,33,0,2,2,1,11,19,2,5,14,172,43,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156784082241109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.098386612352791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283085045694381,0.0,0.3582111201390873,0.0,0.11044447978769957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11560286527256827,0.06787207240907561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367650842554178,0.09321274721585528,0.21748524092929525,0.0,0.0695110297882974,0.09519697781855307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05321327342929962,0.0,0.10104836092608258,0.0,0.0,0.1790367621382558,0.0,0.0,0.08130933539966617,0.0972940871398321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882715917746594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07054117082074161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364169550175416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09354349635800076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051415689522699454,0.1054796485282082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11488354843310104,0.0,0.0,0.19916413708684555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10605869662574678,0.0,0.10626393174568803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23209387394010586,0.0,0.08116874627172081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08004091646453781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099549863291702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079228237469376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11789458531371128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06742041100842756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651003434153296,0.16772772765130958,0.19161584997312914,0.0,0.0,0.10802890540835802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08404601186496298,0.0,0.0,0.11002128453113068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582570474649107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12219351336992812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1227343504316846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429041643695981,0.11447255023667095,0.0,0.3286803939468069,0.0,0.1817897619187352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07661707820003588,0.0,0.21450019484465144,0.07476055454400261,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Fleuriana,2020/04/16,"Exercise and PTSD So I recently started doing cardio consistently and I realized that it isn't impacting me mentally like many people seem to experience. While doing it, I feel kind of unhappy or agitated and I never experience that supposed rush of euphoria. Usually my PTSD symptoms gets worse after and I don't really know what to do about that. I try to combat with positive thoughts, acknowledging negative thoughts, but not lingering on them too much. Showering after tends to be the worst and I end up in a funk all day. Though my heart rate is elevated, it isn't really a feeling of anxiety, and I'm wary of using my physical state to indicate my mood.

Has anyone else experienced or heard of this issue and know what the mechanisms might be or how to deal with it? My best guess is that adrenaline has been associated with trauma for me from such a young age that I might have been classically conditioned to respond this way. Feel free to give technical terms. I've studied neuroscience and psychology, so I have some familiarity with the subject. I'm hoping to find a way to combat this that's more effective than what I do now, as I'd really like to get in shape again.",5.582651345291481,7.098667385650224,7.148764013452915,68.63372897982065,67.96860986547085,11.853026905829596,32.32315022421525,11.578365685549247,4.428130269058297,949,41,167,35,16,327,135,223,0.113,0.768,0.11900000000000001,0.6775,1,0,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,2,9,9,0,0,7,0,19,4,1,3,2,38,38,18,0,1,5,0,3,2,0,2,3,1,1,0,16,12,0,0,12,1,1,1,6,2,0,0,5,5,18,7,31,29,7,23,0,0,0,0,5,5,0,9,16,121,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481054950201364,0.0,0.0,0.09579900051223768,0.14038062502115814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14378117510027028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08835866080610008,0.14124896854407792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445239004305392,0.0,0.12134819553482792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26803972760552186,0.0,0.0,0.20782569665692247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12522259632804816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14316178338409824,0.13143031276296696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15092947690777314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16235483684671478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13607960417762652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430004894823631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14267248253098613,0.15059174658171348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13387012682525598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13890434866238896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13807158184606055,0.2906871314266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10071645648814938,0.0,0.10566881878385624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09498391912183506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3203094429926865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26331200814659084,0.0,0.13527861891267315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12472670490156078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09697478670081898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424035058180105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460941330152787,0.21753769036871212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09301926506095663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833070172505418,0.15089467420974392,0.0,0.0,0.21750074072690412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962259649954795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,peenyweenyboi,2020/04/16,"i physically can’t show affection i don’t really know when this started, i can’t even remember this ever being a big issue until recently. my mom tried to hug me and i immediately broke down sobbing after she left. whenever someone tries to touch me affectionately or even playfully i just get really uncomfortable and feel sick to my stomach. even with my best friends and immediate family. i even feel weird saying i love you. i hate being vulnerable and open to people, even though i wish desperately that i could. i feel like i’ll never truly be able to be loved if i myself can’t reciprocate it. how do i fix this? where did this come from? i’ve dealt with anxiety and depression for a large part of my life, but i’ve never had any crazy trauma in my past (that i know of) that could cause this?",4.191666666666666,5.756762089171977,6.047531847133758,75.00764596602973,71.42038216560509,9.819320594479832,25.82218683651805,10.125756701596842,2.642214861995753,636,20,122,18,12,220,100,157,0.15,0.696,0.154,0.4008,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,0,1,11,14,1,0,2,0,13,6,1,3,3,28,25,12,0,4,4,1,4,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,9,9,0,0,6,2,0,1,6,6,0,0,2,5,24,8,15,17,2,16,0,3,0,3,7,6,1,2,10,86,33,0,0.14259660829706952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09697058348806213,0.0,0.10908601504317768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14964634289616538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648599676463533,0.0,0.12283435168133178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22770357706717756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.122818249777409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4709185745978596,0.128986796014593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13442739152933372,0.0,0.2163033891110396,0.10187104545957602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11016978584413503,0.0,0.07450084237725446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407846288263558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14883381130021778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673473339318378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15493163214681085,0.0,0.10072020152293186,0.06966549998104636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257398012662796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700742420922154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2199585902415119,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15441823084768966,0.1361245977621029,0.09885853360577417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827020773398801,0.0,0.14079694771035095,0.0,0.16153415965309162,0.0,0.0,0.11339854632660093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12082164346662272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093061329338084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14010044364934546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19362747349301704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16397906218442015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MPostman,2020/04/16,"Over-focus issue ? Hi,

Since I was young, I have ""slight"" issue with my hearing. I don't really need to wear hearing aid yet, but i start to realize my problem may be related to my brain?

So the problem is, when I'm focus on something. (e.g: playing game, read a book, typing a document), other people talks to me and won't notice it most of the time ... It's not like they didn't talk loud enough, it just that it didn't catch my attention somehow)

It's like when I focus doing on something, my focus is so narrow to the point that other cannot distract me...in a bad way, many times when my manager talks to me at work I didn't notice it cuz I was working on my tasks and this is a bad thing :(

Also, I realize that I'm pretty bad in holding a conversation with others. I realize that people speak too fast and I have to put so much effort on the conversation in order to communicate. By reading their lip moving I can understand better the conversaion. When I watch TV, I always have to turn on subtitles ...I feel like I'm heavily depending on my eyes/visual things over my ear/hearing....I wonder could it be my strong dependence on visual ability that I gradually lose my hearing ability?  Or anything that is causing my 'over-focused"" situation?

Any idea why I have this issue?Please advise. Thanks",3.962857730263156,5.2929873828125045,5.751455592105263,77.82561677631581,71.65625,8.826973684210527,28.31743421052632,9.276330184999452,2.5389718750000005,1014,38,190,22,19,349,137,256,0.085,0.767,0.14800000000000002,0.9563,0,0,2,0,0,0,50.0,0,0,2,6,12,14,0,1,10,0,22,3,3,4,0,29,35,14,0,4,4,0,1,3,0,2,0,5,0,0,20,5,0,1,8,6,0,3,7,7,0,0,5,7,32,7,24,25,3,28,0,1,1,0,14,13,0,7,13,130,52,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08999989386769679,0.09364406061243964,0.0,0.0,0.0765325018235964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09261257674775347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819039115836234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09953436078898838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256342274586785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156117598890281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08985572634652941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628609586901492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05690467812034524,0.08040011405486161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3805294505781357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12704635644927026,0.0,0.2349294708770933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1649471874632236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12590584674903374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410004697154225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196144644844451,0.08273140853232877,0.08344855704328627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562599024027242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15604507328541342,0.0,0.0,0.12353745359346276,0.10638868160394248,0.0,0.0,0.11449579714334847,0.0,0.21537522217503072,0.0,0.1131359164054041,0.0,0.0,0.225145153903966,0.0,0.07209736481017771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09309600584626802,0.12650205984614246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732808468142135,0.0,0.0,0.07965789281739567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2713712826186612,0.0,0.1036136649254425,0.0,0.0,0.1495359694791465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13124843212105686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12241351085998295,0.0,0.11716031744636768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08933069760689444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155175980647324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12204712999311434,0.16386400957975214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nortongreg50,2020/04/16,"Quarantine guilt? I have a good job where I've basically been on paid vacation since early march. I just sit at home all day smoking weed, cooking food and relaxing. I'm having a great time. It's hard to see others losing their livelihoods and the essentials still having to work.

I don't feel one bit guilty. Should I?",2.2943778801843284,4.94711848387097,3.28041474654378,87.31919354838709,81.90322580645163,6.768663594470048,21.76036866359447,7.957251820313856,1.2555917050691243,254,8,49,5,7,81,53,62,0.134,0.6779999999999999,0.188,0.6767,1,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,2,3,5,0,1,3,0,6,2,0,0,1,6,10,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,2,2,0,1,2,1,0,1,2,0,1,2,3,5,3,4,7,2,9,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,5,27,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30785793398208444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18185897438500595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14258163904580146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3409810889255974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2365182110650409,0.0,0.3108928384509496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25260591918191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.282857022263875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798296441951954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3154725162834787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19108241154112554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22470797961457295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2332634423149932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2251960338972708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1644295090680882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2052906706289284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dannichristine,2020/04/16,"I have a general poll I'd like to ask.. This is not to boast, being this way is nothing to be proud of.

But did anyone else do very well in school, have high test scores, have a higher than average IQ and then suddenly your mental health got bad and declined and your mental health increasingly got worse over time? Specifically highschool into early adulthood.",4.399303482587066,6.824172238805971,4.615746268656718,81.85904228855723,72.88059701492537,7.451741293532338,24.59950248756219,8.344100000000001,1.689230845771144,288,9,51,5,6,90,53,67,0.127,0.805,0.068,-0.6441,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,0,1,1,4,0,0,2,0,9,2,0,0,0,7,12,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,1,0,3,0,3,3,8,7,1,10,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,5,31,5,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14994307954114686,0.21972153269902372,0.0,0.0,0.20047465285359256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17905040783881246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17913906963682513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34301827941626073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558843878081889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265701200856117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047657019771234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43221490972593535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20576322164437608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2170271101872868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12504306077627214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17693739978779274,0.0,0.17021435867123938,0.0,0.0,0.19280942921181365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2185350784531286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Weirdboithrowaway,2020/04/16,"I don't really know where to start I don't exactly know what to say, I don't really have tangible issues that are contributing to my awful mental health, I just feel frustrated, upset, overstimulated and understimulated at the same time, and feeling like I can't make meaningful change in my life anymore. I am skeptical of what I can be helped with, since I don't really know what my issues are, just... I want help.",8.057625000000002,7.047715512500003,9.025000000000002,65.98000000000003,62.625,13.5,32.5,12.602617957971056,4.216625,331,10,62,11,4,114,51,80,0.16899999999999998,0.728,0.102,-0.7401,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,0,0,0,0,3,4,2,1,1,1,11,2,0,1,1,15,19,2,0,1,2,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,6,0,0,0,5,3,0,0,0,3,12,1,7,18,1,5,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,3,41,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21126320997126788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22535183214848364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21542332600387612,0.15218485151747832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22643523997017226,0.0,0.0,0.28557186316684263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4446847751747477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35121832736866804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15046560918686455,0.10407308301075084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421956070977464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21467874184727787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.409407134085088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16940575074258662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17621619065014124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15077994270429185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12421638569203672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564745701707905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,a5n10651,2020/04/16,"Meltdown So I'd imagine some of you here are familiar with having meltdowns and just absolutely breaking for a hot minute. What do you do? Would it be absurd to request from a psychiatrist a benzodiazepine i.e. Ativan Xanax to calm down? I'm a psych nurse, and I've worked with lots of drug seeking patients. I don’t want to be one of those. Historically, I used to cut myself when I felt that I've lost control and can't contain my emotions. I've eliminated that by smoking cigarettes on occasion. It's very rare that I do smoke, but I did tonight. And I'm just wondering if it's outlandish to request a benzo for times when you feel you can't handle yourself. I've been prescribed Buspar for anxiety, but I don’t take it regularly, as my anxiety is not regular. Cigarettes work great for me when the occasion does come. But of course, that isn't an ideal method. What are your thoughts? Thanks for reading.",3.788983050847456,5.809154338983053,4.8786666666666685,81.10206779661017,73.40677966101694,8.109830508474579,30.444067796610174,8.841846274778883,2.606434576271187,726,33,138,15,15,238,110,177,0.066,0.857,0.077,0.5962,0,0,5,0,0,1,22.0,0,5,0,5,7,6,1,0,7,0,17,2,0,2,0,27,29,13,0,4,7,0,3,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,11,7,0,2,5,1,0,1,6,2,0,1,5,3,15,4,21,21,2,10,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,4,6,90,26,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3304084743944628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860252697204013,0.0,0.0,0.2422108007558537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889828216101116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504381068679689,0.0,0.0,0.2429192102791912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919284318013067,0.0,0.2073497290646982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380900737429128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23573932741986656,0.18359638853734825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14633603553392252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21601246413352876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16237055016870758,0.0,0.0,0.19882145087606395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17144337268415982,0.1259245279968349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18651493965428664,0.0,0.1781846862588397,0.12737527847658672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23419292694599125,0.31443420280962925,0.0,0.0,0.15340754256038874,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,astriaa,2020/04/16,"I don't want to be alive 15f   
everything has gone so shit. I have never felt like this before but I genuinely do not care If I kill myse;f  


ir eally don't want to be fucking alive all I do is depend on alcohol and as soon as this fades idk what im gonna do  


I hate myself so fucking much how do people cope like this  
I hate fucking being like this why wont it stop . ihate I tso mcuh",-1.2549788583509525,0.7207735232558149,1.5916490486257937,97.57628964059198,92.83720930232559,4.52262156448203,14.79492600422833,6.1124844417494595,-0.7255906976744191,297,6,72,3,11,103,58,86,0.276,0.596,0.128,-0.9125,0,0,1,0,0,1,3.0,0,0,0,0,4,11,7,0,0,0,13,5,1,2,2,12,24,8,1,3,3,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,1,1,1,1,0,0,1,5,7,0,0,2,1,9,4,5,17,2,6,0,0,0,3,0,1,4,2,7,44,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20823307994901893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16580115743438742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986603549926856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1751166713677692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18708447902886932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5404010546532246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3847437976654699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21046909921532067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21557026171089932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28557843195400456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14323557912908516,0.0,0.15027866331032902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350829560307957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2000085038802933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16290151582033174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298526043167759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758198655807233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kenoajay,2020/04/16,"U don't know if my what I'm telling myself is real anymore (im indulging myself in a nice long story of my (relatively short) life so far, to skip it's the next paragraph for the bulk of my story)
I've been struggling with undiagnosed (by my most likely terrible choice) mental health issues for roughly 2-3 years now and this last year I've had frequent thoughts and fantasies about suicide. I feel guilty because in my eyes they seem so unjustified, I manage to be in a neutral mood most of the time, I can usually enjoy myself in the company of others and the life I have is one I'm extremely thankful for. The only problems I have that I know for a fact change my mental state are physical problems including, like chronic fatigue, chronic pain and frequent injury due to scoliosis and hypermobility and weakened joints,tendons and ligaments. Due to these I often reserve myself from doing activities I've loved since I was still chewing pencils in school learning about multiplication, such as  Competing in track and field events and now even simpler things like going for a jog daily. Starting with feelings of boredom and disinterest in my hobbies and social interaction it slowly spread and mutated, boredom becoming apathy and disinterest in socialising becoming complete emotional isolation from all my 'friends and most of my loved ones'. It stayed like this for months until  eventually I started to  wonder if life was worth living. 

At this point I'm time it was about 2 years ago just at the start of Fall, I started to hurt myself but I never felt like I needed to. I kept doing this until eventual I thought about how it would impact my family, and just like that I stopped. Being around other people in my life who had openly talked about similar experiences to what I was having I felt a small dagger of guilt press itself into my stomach as I thought about how often they deeply struggled with soul crushing relapses. For the other people around me, it seemed to haunt them like an inescapable burden, yet I almost wasn't affected by my decision to stop. I felt/feel like a fraud, telling myself I did it to feel better but yet being able to get clean with almost no difficulty. It wasn't right and I feel like an attention seeking poser when I think back on it. I hid it and I only opened up to people who reciprocated the circumstances and yet I feel like my ""faking"" the need for it was nothing more than an insult to everybody else who truly struggles with staying clean and safe.

Ever since then I began to think about suicide as well. The greatest mistake of my life was the first time I seriously considered it. Except the only thought I had on it was how people would react. Convincing myself I was going to do it because I would be better off and not because I wanted to see how people would act. After once again talking to the people around me about it and having them tell me to take care of myself and that I'm loved. I made a pathetic half hearted attempt to kill myself. Only to very predictably survive and once again have people support me in my state of ' vulnerability '. During the time I felt as if it was all very real, I'd never blatantly fake something just for attention. But looking back I feel so ashamed that I worried people around me who have struggles much worse than I do and worried them over me when they could have been focusing on helping themselves. I leeched off of their empathy for me and stopped them from doing what they needed to do to be better. Since then there's been a dagger of guilt stabbed in me, slowly being pressed deeper into my body.

Since then I've gone through cycling waves of, feeling bored but fine most of the time and only sad/happy or anything other than disinterested about 10% of the time shifting into weeks and months of almost complete apathy in the company of others and sadness so bad it sends crippling waves of pain pulsing through my chest whenever I'm left alone with my own thoughts. But because of the way I used these issues in the past as a guise to let myself be convinced I was deserving of the attention, time and care given to me by people much more deserving than me. I can't trust myself that these feelings are real.
 I don't trust myself to not do this purely to get some sort of sick gratification from people worrying about my own safety and health. 

The last 6 months I've been in a state of constant sadness whenever I stop moving (figuratively and literally). With pain so bad sometimes it almost paralyzes me wherever I am, with the feeling of my insides being rotted away by guilt and pain from these episodes. Suicidal thoughts became more and more frequent until now I can't go half a day without vividly imagining killing myself. Despite everything I still have the same thoughts as I used to. Every time I think if dying my initial thought is of how would people around me react, what would they all do. Then of course my thoughts flit away to how it will make my sadness go away.
I can't trust myself enough to know whether all of this is real or if my mind forcing me to suffer just so I can stay relevant and significant to the other people around me and I guess myself. 

This is all I think about anymore and I can't believe in my own thoughts because I know how much they lie to me and persuade me things are different to how they actually are.

I don't know if this pain is real or just a sick excuse for me to continue and validate my reason to share my 'struggling' with people close to me to feel important and cared for.

I don't know what to believe. I can't trust what my mind is telling me I'm really feeling.

Maybe this is payback for all of the worry and effort I stole from people who needed it for themselves. Karma fulfilling the issues and pain I convinced myself I had and now I'm getting a taste of properly.

I don't know what to believe. I just feel so guilty that for so long I relied on people who were fighting so hard to keep themselves going, just to indulge whatever disgusting subconscious need I had to get from their attention and worry.

I'm not sure what I expect from this post, and I don't know what I really want from it either. But please respond. At the very least I need to know whether or not I really am leeching off of others. Based on what I've said please tell me if I'm as bad a person I think. I feel so guilty about making my problems out to be bad enough that I got others in worse positions than me to give me empathy and support I needed only to gratify myself by capitalising on such horrible things as committing suicide. I'm suffering so badly now. I haven't slept more than 3 hours in over a week because of my thoughts.

I don't know if my pain is real anymore",6.985453747289367,6.931588149806949,7.2653271275189075,74.57018194319566,64.4131274131274,9.783149098217592,34.033162320833554,9.36563166914704,3.0751594118580416,5374,211,962,87,73,1749,445,1295,0.19899999999999998,0.6920000000000001,0.109,-0.9993,1,2,1,0,2,7,85.0,0,0,13,8,68,81,5,9,46,0,87,30,6,17,14,235,191,101,7,29,34,0,20,10,1,7,19,1,2,1,70,67,2,7,54,2,1,11,23,43,1,5,45,26,159,37,195,128,28,144,2,7,4,3,42,54,0,28,81,716,229,4,0.032050015490544134,0.0,0.031276191848454774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028410404945089063,0.0,0.1283738435945369,0.03319415026926455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953550098116571,0.0,0.0,0.026374431910417318,0.17118785270675527,0.0,0.0,0.09033613372608236,0.049288967165675227,0.13380212102281475,0.11722435179328182,0.07079344813494635,0.0,0.10832817665305483,0.0,0.08503690255351085,0.0,0.035600342051200405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09803138044251064,0.0,0.03390466670859859,0.0,0.06720766292954665,0.03463468076867971,0.0,0.02558932943570344,0.0,0.0,0.02066960855977348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033262856034310485,0.03348544468954938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02677367537418718,0.03605195361271218,0.0,0.06623246702181823,0.0,0.02116873296060932,0.02899107390921246,0.027003520356616854,0.0,0.02880448732597228,0.03135106506555359,0.03021390222615223,0.0,0.22687631158129204,0.06868961241102188,0.12309216393808255,0.0,0.0,0.027261726803498837,0.0,0.0,0.024761762464493492,0.0,0.06697924111281017,0.030745295287585187,0.09107381198086524,0.0,0.02563332521242283,0.0,0.03530670541353053,0.0,0.0,0.03411783745730063,0.028710518614924845,0.0,0.0,0.06813533548031453,0.0,0.03797942267110283,0.0214824497979802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031562809274202186,0.0,0.03431020445681459,0.0,0.03461951654005868,0.10035566795006437,0.0,0.028487526377254543,0.07091718707087058,0.0,0.17613850333286918,0.05225008056675588,0.0,0.0,0.034822435607555886,0.032773312294066305,0.11318936886267553,0.1565801865986544,0.0,0.02830075086165423,0.05672651030792216,0.026913941009391568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677917088909562,0.030326499594107707,0.04278726842477431,0.0,0.0321985483751256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06459775474075026,0.0,0.06472275842610514,0.0,0.07674604976870597,0.03406409431451818,0.0706813473227896,0.16635276267376745,0.04943789553417858,0.0,0.03408555507369195,0.0,0.0,0.03075285425687492,0.0,0.0,0.06826444099615925,0.043435839914626136,0.14625288605741488,0.23872433323232906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03059536632056869,0.3332916790177245,0.02798483729961649,0.0,0.07036258513919727,0.03029762411907315,0.0,0.03069505539737283,0.0,0.0,0.0920026091259383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21887960561754094,0.061596181832377625,0.03295275384682151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.027370538110615208,0.030486904111205262,0.0,0.0,0.032436326745094904,0.02553971281646976,0.05835426077638466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1060484160379986,0.0,0.0,0.032670954638986525,0.0,0.02467366774670692,0.03169828483692222,0.0,0.09074066369892624,0.10248315636800104,0.05119036754288263,0.10718099221915774,0.0,0.1675281749756803,0.0,0.1402300600745811,0.07273995553760511,0.030206760303484494,0.0,0.02409762297524744,0.05152117683657985,0.14006563100175667,0.029507348208310892,0.0,0.0,0.06387781849426287,0.10268177901717714,0.0,0.2798854550582363,0.14950897417546746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05536184597970562,0.03529856407075184,0.07933385798656586,0.037807859047181896,0.02543981049096842,0.05141717839876386,0.0,0.028816812978123437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030895071225414638,0.034756874637367534,0.0,0.16274173237710854,0.06532340778858016,0.13660446866769022,0.0,0.0,0.06191747752462906
mentalhealth,RINFONE-hetA-pold,2020/04/16,"I can’t stop hurting I can’t take myself anymore.

can’t say much about myself but I’m basically a freshman college student who is staying with parents because of the corona. My parents keep a horde of animals in their house, and by a horde I mean 50+ animals, from companion animals to reptilian exotics. My job is to clean up some of the animals and cohabit every minute of my day with them, which is mentally and physically exhausting sometimes because of the amount of schoolwork, general stress, and other stuff.  

My mother is the hoarder of these pets, and from many circumstances that I can’t discuss, can’t leave her house. She is also stressed with taking care of my brother (toddler) and the 50+ animals, and she has mental issues. My stepfather definitely has anger management and personality issues, and also takes care of these animals because he had done a terrible thing to my mother (cheating, domestic violence, huge sum of debt worth $200,000 due to gambling, and death threats) and therefore has to comply with complete obedience. Our family has been in civil disputes and in court because of this incident that my stepfather caused.

The state of our house is honestly a mess. You leave one hour without cleaning the animals and they shit themselves everywhere and everything, tearing every furniture, walls, themselves, and some animals die because they get into fights with each other.  One room purely reeks of ammonia because of the amount of animals packed in that room. 

The sound of dogs barking and howling is a regular occurrence and my mother demands me to silence them. Most of them are not housebroken either.

I am also allergic to these animals.

I could describe the state of the environment all day long.

I’m so stressed with their fighting, and my mother taking her anger out on me verbally then shouting at me that I should leave the house immediately because I don’t do anything to help around the house (I am a full time student taking 6 classes who does some but not all chores in the house, like cleaning the dogs, cooking sometimes, and taking the dishes out). If I don’t do any of he chores, she yell at me; if I ask if I should do chores, like washing a dog, she says she is too sick to help me even dry a dog. I try when I can to help, but she just doesn’t realize that.

I also have a girlfriend who I really love and want to be committed to her, however, my mother thinks I am lazing when I am talking on the phone with her. And it is so hard to manage because I didn’t tell my gf any of this happening because I don’t want her worrying. Even then I lash out at her at times on the phone and become hysterical, to which my poor gf, without getting angry, responds by telling me that I can talk to her anytime. But it’s not that easy because of the abnormality of the situation compared to her world. We just live in two different environments it’s impossible for me to even tell. 

With the midst of corona, I can’t even go outside to work. I have little money that I received from my biological father, but I don’t have a car. And the quarantine seem to continue forever. I have no relatives living in the States, and I have nowhere to go in e moment. My mother demands absolute obedience or out of her house, and I understand. 

But it is all too much.

I have resorted to turning my anger on some of the animals as well, and I hate myself for it because it’s such an immoral act on a animal that doesnt know betterx

I can’t go on like this until August or whenever the quarantine ends.

I don’t want to kill myself, but I nearly overdosed. 

I feel selfish for having thoughts like this when my parents took me in and fed me during this crisis.

I really need help, but I don’t want to cause harm to anyone either.

I might delete this post as well.

Edit: Animal Control, CPS, everything has come to our house, and passed everything. It’s no use trying to change the house because my parents make it look good during their visits.",6.511365497076023,6.786806060526319,7.159561403508771,73.81304093567255,65.3684210526316,10.492397660818712,35.57309941520468,10.30485914683132,3.744572222222223,3146,142,566,71,45,1041,322,760,0.161,0.742,0.09699999999999999,-0.9957,8,2,0,0,4,1,87.0,4,1,8,2,22,31,10,3,39,0,56,9,1,6,5,103,95,55,3,11,22,12,2,4,4,3,4,5,9,1,35,45,3,3,8,1,5,10,23,20,2,3,7,9,97,11,100,83,16,67,0,1,1,1,71,34,1,12,22,412,132,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16525247461669168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07026222349521663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05123362642115879,0.03612242865015107,0.0,0.04251243204434404,0.04598905978166057,0.048295869112655376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3779032895556551,0.0570552886834498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10534324589892884,0.1061397330342296,0.05465027054729174,0.044501200056129765,0.05416536008919714,0.0,0.057941973778036365,0.041246940688265316,0.0,0.0,0.06663387725393917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053615748447680925,0.05397453475677856,0.0,0.0,0.04520870935590502,0.05286692896329102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04575613014325189,0.0,0.0,0.13648587002889193,0.0,0.08705289486559943,0.0,0.1392881728232291,0.0,0.04870119931100452,0.0,0.02612124990524173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053981265755062506,0.0,0.08808006002191772,0.04333062335176298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045683469916466934,0.0,0.046277924609734435,0.05100433914840935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13850856621817034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0508754762550213,0.5364865861199418,0.055303948928725984,0.0,0.0,0.1078408950123332,0.051265367096597535,0.04591848777399238,0.05715501487134619,0.0,0.028391421581192205,0.0,0.0,0.16410396626631127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095541871575693,0.05177768781285541,0.09123485593142007,0.045718177414577794,0.04338205623133511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046625883959861975,0.0,0.03448398144554658,0.05237593708623183,0.0,0.056273750032868816,0.0,0.0,0.10412386010667614,0.05480393901987055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07595325617044353,0.038305824490379815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07001338261735973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2294527943591045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04510821306077359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049476760716987166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619045554508472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216547451231115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04703004702016216,0.0,0.0,0.053029063113559725,0.0,0.05806889746007556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102187693340963,0.0,0.0,0.05506353319233245,0.0,0.043190737374352535,0.1775317964838861,0.0,0.05913924990422757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23305492895051794,0.08304597939964031,0.13546143416325354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03432113630734028,0.03310215110973379,0.0,0.04101290022362318,0.060247649373479685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057397043476978486,0.0701485766508528,0.05619210958700415,0.05046508956700662,0.053780708934365117,0.0,0.04461833951638725,0.0,0.0,0.1218835001978267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09289851683843604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0995983246529632,0.0,0.03760967363399667,0.05246404443485266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FemmeFeather,2020/04/16,"What’s helping you get through these scary times? I need to vent a bit too The uncertainty of everything is making my mental health just drop. I lost my job, then today my dad lost his job, Im incredibly depressed and extremely anxious since I’m immune compromised and can’t leave my apartment. I feel like I’m getting cabin fever and I can’t see my therapist or my friends. 

I would do anything for a hug right now, but I’m alone in my apartment, not sure when this nightmare will end.

What’s helping you guys? Animal Crossing is helping and my sister said there’s Ghibli movies on UK Netflix so im going to use my VPN to watch some movies later. I also got ice cream in my grocery delivery.

What’s comforting you?",1.812875874125872,4.325899426573429,3.326394230769232,87.1326682692308,82.7062937062937,6.372202797202798,25.02141608391609,7.645422480735847,1.5203290209790206,570,23,111,10,16,187,98,143,0.134,0.7390000000000001,0.127,0.4774,2,1,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,0,2,7,8,0,0,3,0,7,4,0,2,1,15,22,10,0,2,4,2,1,1,1,2,3,1,0,1,5,4,0,0,1,1,0,2,3,3,0,0,4,5,20,5,9,16,2,16,0,3,3,1,12,6,0,2,8,60,25,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161385131196515,0.0,0.1246112083833578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17603508803629894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12822865232484704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17011782793108818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13420970323199194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13801249709142654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14004322835324035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07878854516946675,0.11131963534605982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12038808800866956,0.0,0.16282166476246082,0.0,0.08855752580422553,0.0,0.12462549933806305,0.0,0.0,0.15428878753132605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656320461046818,0.0,0.0,0.3133336401998275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33663010942928284,0.0,0.3092596032557417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16499354364186786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612700958456714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34019736286195745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10401273827253928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15703244456131182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11554041992869275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1330715758068633,0.1482228940898099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12417036948295435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1288979940489843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686087563787895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18092194911394935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09086136117598373,0.0,0.14770152370183695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345806219505616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11069184338773083,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Khanthebrit,2020/04/16,"Suffering from Low Moods **Description:**

I wake up feeling weird and generally in a low mood. I have these dreams, I can't quite recall all of them but upon waking they feel taxing to me. Sometimes their vividness scares me, for example, although I can't remember now, the music I heard in one of them felt very hallucinogenic if that makes sense.

The persistence in my low mood generally spans through the day. I try to work and concentrate, but find it incredibly hard. There's this ringing in my head that doctors have put down to tinnitus, for reference I'm age 22 Male and physically healthy. Although I hope it's tinnitus, the ringing first accompanied my decline in mental health. It brought with it brain fog, a perception that overall my cognition such as memory and intelligence has diminished. I can easily sleep 10hrs in a day. This ringing ultimately feels like it connects my symptoms. The ringing comes from my head. If I put my hand over my right ear, it doesn't seem to be prevalent. If I do it over my left ear it becomes apparent, but it sounds like the source is coming from the back of my head.

I used to have a very vivid imagination when going to bed, able to conjure up all sorts of stories. That seems to have gone now. When I close my eyes and sleep, it feels like nothing. Although it's not nothing. It's more lack of control and power in imaginative thought to what I used to have when going to sleep. Thoughts sometimes come to me, none of them disturbing, but then 30 seconds later it passes and I can't recall what I thought. Kinda like memory amnesia but only as I'm closing my eyes trying to sleep. This worries me quite a bit. It doesn't happen with every thought, but sometimes it does occur.

Fortunately, panic attacks have stopped occurring. When they did I got this sense of impending doom and kind of isolation from the environment. At some points, I thought I was going to pass out or start losing control of my mind - ie perhaps hallucinate, lose the sense of what and who I am.

I've never had what I considered 'mental problems'. In fact, if you asked me last year I'd be confused as to someone's struggle. But there's definitely been a transition from normal to this, and that scares me. This ringing in my head leads me to worry about my health as well.

1. I know what I said is very broad and vague, but how can you diagnose something you can't see? This is my first question?
2. Can anyone relate or perhaps suggest what my problem could be? If it was depression, I think there would be some satisfaction in that because I can look into treatment. But I don't know if ringing in heads and sleep issues can be related to this or not.
3. **There is no physical pain. All my symptoms are mental.**",3.0692476834828675,5.563821816443597,4.0583126195028685,83.88036200176498,77.48948374760994,7.2353140167671715,27.64851448742462,8.263242389622931,2.1036251213413744,2162,92,406,42,52,697,251,523,0.133,0.7759999999999999,0.092,-0.968,2,1,1,0,0,0,71.0,0,3,6,12,15,29,1,6,15,0,38,25,18,7,5,91,75,43,0,13,20,0,7,4,0,1,7,11,1,1,38,21,0,3,22,1,1,13,12,19,1,4,16,24,59,7,63,52,9,62,1,8,6,0,16,30,0,18,23,277,97,4,0.06917016859500821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04836539016815665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06466477034993144,0.07869105250658087,0.0,0.05318759002986207,0.0,0.04216549276122361,0.07639301678903923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551590918914909,0.0,0.0,0.07721678410024138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17875192649790805,0.0,0.0,0.15516045147623872,0.055226751195269486,0.0,0.0,0.08921807287701149,0.0,0.05957616485483967,0.07020626510332292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079859854799507,0.06053128066703223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058278850326203474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398980622906326,0.09883036453025412,0.06641420918215764,0.0,0.06322028097257609,0.11767222014263395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11793300251911193,0.0,0.05532170264058303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06116695165057594,0.0,0.06196288465540325,0.0,0.3549427428630061,0.14704930934717586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06870158472205018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721956850392021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07203008639937926,0.07602823140726121,0.05638291942435358,0.0,0.0,0.07515359056765826,0.0,0.0,0.1351722018213963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05808552066768796,0.15476745122782448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046171624652329685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091217828394641,0.0,0.06984215208239944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05334829822610297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06777207900573222,0.13274128459334733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046871496378011086,0.05260703014367542,0.07360193624458586,0.08115628930085235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538816709660497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13237301942021107,0.0,0.13907024873348847,0.0774864191631584,0.14714197725027733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0783563170996329,0.059070946040756786,0.0657966701430794,0.0,0.13850281119415572,0.0,0.05511966887830397,0.12593984727809174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3461006123176617,0.0,0.058607659384869226,0.05325057513312169,0.2052331962512831,0.0,0.04895900134845075,0.0,0.0,0.057829358180549975,0.0,0.07231167866923928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14378857990948712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04432145106668675,0.0,0.2745669374081411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09392400805379264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11948163398788117,0.0,0.17121789953088212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06219228857020995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050356706549897934,0.1404913276162313,0.0,0.049136503180804085,0.0,0.0,0.044543320742125816
mentalhealth,nikeidarrien,2020/04/16,"Look back at the Manic I was going through pictures on my phone and saw a bunch where my hair and make up were crazy, I was drawing weird stuff and other things I did while I was manic. Experiencing mixed feelings on whether I should delete them or not. On one hand, they don’t make me feel good, but on the other I guess I could say I’ve come pretty far. Thoughts on whether I should just take the time to go on a pic deleting spree or should I just leave them? Ugh. Thanks.",4.567380952380951,4.647165806122452,4.265714285714289,93.57095238095242,69.51020408163265,6.941496598639455,25.51700680272109,5.46131890053228,0.34154557823129217,371,9,87,1,6,112,67,98,0.102,0.794,0.10400000000000001,0.5,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,3,0,4,4,0,0,5,0,10,2,2,2,0,22,23,9,0,4,8,0,4,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,2,0,1,7,8,15,2,10,12,1,16,0,0,2,0,5,10,0,3,3,60,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19179920042784548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21486513776356986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19915259773065744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2522424542424585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835179606686585,0.20921324243199785,0.0,0.0,0.2747794590742616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2641143854913663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20946157579696106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3329980052038239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.169022802558112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2537638540965502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19835977432326604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28554203171776577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875431799302472,0.0,0.0,0.2296451363680149,0.0,0.0,0.16571273744477705,0.0,0.0,0.1980225801892394,0.14544685835703502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ifeellikeimbroken,2020/04/16,"i'm sad and just need to vent (tw?) my mental health has sucked for years.  i started restricting calories at 14/15, self-h\*rming at 16, and have generally struggled with what I think is depression and possibly anxiety for years.  i'm 19 now and still struggle a lot, though more off and on.  i'm also not trying to self-diagnose, maybe im just a wimp idk.  

i come from a very religious home, so all through my growing up there was never much talk about mental health and such, so my family knows almost nothing.  i don't think they meant to make it such a taboo topic, its just one of those things where a lot of christian's, not all but a lot, respond to mental health issues by giving the impression that your faith is lacking and that's why you are struggling.  (i'm still a Christian and truly my faith has helped me out of some very dark places, I just don't think that your faith is the only answer.)

 so here's my issue.  my mother mentioned multiple times through my teenage years that she struggled with depression in college.  she has also struggled with her weight/body image and I believe that she most likely had some disordered eating thoughts/habits.  my older sister struggled with bulimia in college and into her adult life as well, so there definitely seems to a pattern.  knowing all of these things, i feel like as a parent i would have discussed mental health a lot more to my younger kids and made sure they knew they weren't alone, could get help, etc.

fast forward to my teenage years, and me and my mom definitely did NOT get along.  i was homeschooled my kindergarten through twelfth which was honestly just not healthy for our relationship and created a lot of tension and distention between us.  most of my childhood memories were wishes to be her favorite child, for her to love me, etc.  i was definitely my dad's favorite child and we made jokes that were really true throughout much of my growing up and into the current day.  i truly believed she didn't love me and would never love me, and it made it so i never talked to her or was around her if i didn't have to be.  

this was definitely a contributing factor to my struggling mental health as i entered my later teen years, but i also just had incredibly low self-esteem and hated myself as a person.  when my mother noticed that i was maybe not eating a lot of food, she sat me down with my dad (whom i love so so so much but was mega clueless lmao) and began to talk about me not eating and if i was having disordered eating thoughts, etc.  and then she told me ""your sister struggled with bulimia, and i just can't handle that again.""  

i don't think ill ever be able to forgive her for that statement.  to look at your child and basically tell them that even if they're struggling, as a parent you just can't handle it and need to suck it up? am i wrong to still be upset about it?  the more i think about it the more i just can't even believe that you would look at someone who clearly hates themselves so much that they are literally starving themselves and basically tell them they can't struggle because someone else in your family already struggled with something similar a long time ago.

after that, i feel like i just really fell apart. i felt so unloved i started self-h\*rming and eventually tried to commit several times later that year.   they have no idea that i still struggle with self-h\*rm to this day, and the one time my mom saw the scars on my leg she just looked at them, rubbed a finger over the corner of one, and then when i pulled my shorts down she never asked me about them.

i didn't realize until i talked to my best friend a few months ago that most parents would have asked about them or discussed mental health issues if they had seen physical evidence.  my best friend knows more about my mental health than anybody in my family.  

i don't really know why i typed this all out.  i guess to just know if i'm unreasonable for still being angry?  is it wrong to think i have depression?  does the pain and loneliness ever go away?  will my mental health struggles always be such a constant battle?",6.685757575757577,6.631428888888893,6.426272727272727,80.33690909090909,65.03535353535354,9.211717171717172,31.488888888888887,8.713453558529999,2.3515710101010097,3248,110,622,43,45,1017,312,792,0.141,0.7020000000000001,0.157,0.9684,4,1,1,0,0,0,84.0,3,8,12,2,55,51,5,15,28,0,56,22,2,4,14,141,112,65,0,14,28,11,5,3,2,5,11,0,1,6,36,47,5,2,23,1,0,8,23,30,1,3,31,10,110,21,91,69,31,83,5,5,5,4,81,31,2,21,49,456,146,3,0.03775005613565323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06692629411241162,0.0,0.037801228235545714,0.039097673335282725,0.04165812566030519,0.0905661187588868,0.03141107079880915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028878689617327306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0336055534374004,0.07058241320768452,0.0,0.03546742039530488,0.0,0.0,0.023012083836940974,0.0,0.0,0.12759415829088422,0.07923270984197105,0.0,0.0,0.041931802225736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032518330742458065,0.0,0.040794399729505125,0.0,0.030140348074294436,0.0,0.0,0.048691326446543316,0.0,0.09754220410181699,0.03831551234524901,0.0,0.0,0.08652966968588979,0.0,0.03303532851744925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15451092695447646,0.03153532791993553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263038741037963,0.04986711209668046,0.06829417401239839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10676217976720427,0.0,0.038175125288921266,0.05393729529225708,0.03624597388956486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04564751772388464,0.0,0.05833119945468523,0.0,0.03944569250954065,0.03621329366770521,0.021454226852276763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041585942812382745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454073003139243,0.0,0.3210123551999282,0.0,0.0,0.05060613378139349,0.0,0.03786638425549994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042615218424527104,0.04077653856866211,0.1182037524993904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10373221801448916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02666398105040428,0.05532831179667466,0.0,0.0,0.033407611755064036,0.095101618678089,0.0,0.0,0.1925624866305001,0.13628359809208476,0.10716004762118088,0.02519845560453847,0.0,0.07585001068134592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30434542141421983,0.0,0.0,0.08842481899478011,0.030131734650934914,0.0,0.11100253934733686,0.05598237659072483,0.11646068203582742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03622219698680342,0.0429786891161286,0.0,0.0,0.0767412450499511,0.02871061877384329,0.040168721305189926,0.0,0.1257509097620865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032961892930108816,0.0394407739718799,0.0,0.0,0.04255751624278725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255095781779547,0.0,0.0,0.040529432725566486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034366233312944784,0.19690770765405866,0.04264681830701128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397100012035309,0.029061837514101914,0.0,0.0,0.053439368062575945,0.0,0.15073621796834055,0.0,0.0,0.5130392161558689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03557898115428966,0.0,0.0,0.1213682607005059,0.06599042592727605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05015891978155074,0.14513227014760613,0.03708923848577541,0.02996932784951955,0.08804944524243669,0.0,0.0,0.03607179638073205,0.0,0.05125962027468725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04540866948937354,0.0,0.0,0.0622954996352371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045969398448891134,0.033941834065438437,0.0,0.06812710803360986,0.0,0.043410701533921736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10726622710697976,0.08254752056248828,0.0,0.14585879080291894
mentalhealth,thetopcatfelix,2020/04/16,"Uncontrollable Anger followed by Regret Hi I'm (28, M). Recently, I came to a realisation that I have started to get angry a lot. Smallest of things upset me. If things do not happen the way I want it to be, then I get angry and I tend to get into an argument with my loved ones. Also, I get more prone to throw my anger at those who are really close to me. For example, if I'd ask someone to make a cup of coffee for me and they did not pour it in the cup I wanted them to put in then I'd get so furious and out of control. I'd fight with that person verbally and not drink the coffee and because of this the whole day of mine would get ruined. I'd not be able to have a conversation with anyone for a whole day, if I do talk to anyone I'd end up having useless quarrels with them too. I know my behaviour isn't right and I shouldn't be like this but I'm unable to control this. After all the arguments, I also feel major heaviness in my head with a bad headache and then after few hours or days (depends on the severity of the situation) a feeling of slight regret comes that because of me some people had to go through so much. I've had this problem since 2 years after my bad breakup (do not want to go into the details but the breakup was the worst thing in my life). I don't know if it's realated to my past or that I'm going mad. Even while I'm typing this I've a really bad headache.
If anyone of you has ever faced such issue or know someone who has or had this problem then please help me! I don't know if this is the right platform to talk about this or not so forgive me if this isn't supposed to be posted here.",3.269872563718142,3.634207281609197,5.026961519240383,85.97071214392805,72.44827586206897,7.891254372813593,26.049975012493753,7.893859768569023,1.3015040979510248,1266,38,283,16,23,434,163,348,0.191,0.772,0.037000000000000005,-0.9951,1,0,1,0,1,0,28.0,0,1,3,2,11,20,5,2,20,0,25,5,2,4,2,62,56,31,0,16,20,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,1,22,18,1,2,7,1,0,8,11,17,0,1,6,2,31,3,49,44,10,42,0,4,0,1,16,14,0,15,19,199,53,1,0.10293856660890308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16463986905292005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21593111764150044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09623366409426702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257848210114903,0.1255007895271105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773429705353865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08867246032997021,0.0,0.0,0.2309087109917341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19916057870280354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100840606155123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09117301623019017,0.0,0.0,0.06798995240843703,0.09311382684191126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040976644706344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3226869145229733,0.0,0.17550707887211411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09102823449241614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10564466711792024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06899755134609009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10137375271457023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10744111926047288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22628937652866296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270855385095112,0.05029058401726973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08751468821291218,0.09290607535450417,0.0,0.06871229254251242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07567169072082161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06975383680523588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09826650956979556,0.07136464091232947,0.0898819858372861,0.0,0.11299563426518185,0.0,0.0,0.0985866919633364,0.0,0.0,0.19699661217527206,0.0,0.10348169126482394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318901633246119,0.0,0.1016394159250845,0.0,0.0,0.17581794687446187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11629127996998945,0.0,0.08515184603668073,0.11570726182527745,0.0,0.0,0.17443902687889778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07286044726767626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16547624119327092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20516342888642602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18214750089668108,0.0817078427782677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2298544669413906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07312460426720431,0.0,0.0,0.06628906192265598
mentalhealth,N3tFreak,2020/04/16,"Extremely bad derealization. [PLEASE HELP] Hello everyone. I'm a teen, and I've been having extremely bad derealization. I am not suicidal, but have had really bad anxiety. I feel absolutely terrible. Nothing looks real anymore. I've been doubting if the world is really real. I feel like I am in a simulation. I suppose if I had proof that everything is real I would feel much better. I am at my absolute low. I feel slightly better at the beginning and end of the day. I'm so scared that this will get worse. Please somebody help me.

Thank You",1.666440129449839,4.437319592233013,4.50159223300971,75.0187313915858,90.94174757281552,8.571909385113269,25.31326860841424,8.841846274778883,3.102524142394824,430,19,75,15,15,152,64,103,0.251,0.565,0.184,-0.8645,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,2,1,11,0,2,5,0,13,0,0,0,1,16,23,6,1,3,4,0,4,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,7,0,0,4,5,12,4,4,17,1,8,0,1,1,0,4,5,0,3,4,45,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11318713372179436,0.0,0.1467341490077594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3706151645780487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617128886062948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542039044406096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13104648816515496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137979578136833,0.1329747207953609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2992471658638425,0.10570091537625703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07730172199619645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983456765995644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228459357534764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12424709215357835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876583590748594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196927590449088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3248259553256516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.505224309591297,0.1895708120874467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14813133590057306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1618415637337219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362194489007171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507814010675982,0.10510481043524694,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,just--passing-by,2020/04/16,really bad feeling every night for about an hour and a half i am so confused and i’m wondering if anyone has a slight idea of what this could be. all day i feel pretty much fine and no extreme emotions and then around 7 pm i just have such a terrible feeling. i cant describe it. it’s just very uncomfortable and i can’t get through it without sleeping. and then i wake up around 11 and it’s gone. is there any way i can prevent this?,0.2607312252964391,2.519293413043481,2.1652964426877475,94.4350395256917,87.69565217391305,5.084584980237153,22.49407114624506,6.574015621080383,0.496117391304348,342,13,76,4,11,113,67,92,0.165,0.728,0.107,-0.8085,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,8,4,0,1,4,0,9,2,2,0,1,22,16,11,0,2,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,7,9,0,1,5,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,1,3,7,1,8,13,2,10,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,3,5,54,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15225391815541753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15655016370637428,0.0,0.0,0.3986218594131591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869400758250212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1787591687057852,0.0,0.0,0.14439151494387406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518478365844212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18863827062007893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33961885468602937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11697408378709595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204880578075426,0.0,0.0,0.2527462855109133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16458603604253216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21010703433585112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22777817674879566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1434306473651124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22405322206158626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18473396029563294,0.0,0.17771467544019354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21582344559820726,0.24280081401110046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheBigShrimp,2020/04/16,"For the first time in my life, I feel like I’m not okay. I feel like I’m mentally overwhelmed and just not mentally alright right now, and I have no idea how to deal with it.

Theres a couple factors in my life right now that could rip sideways and make everything I feel like I am come crashing down. 

I don’t feel useful or worth much currently at all, and I’ve never dealt with that. I have no clue how to deal with that. 

I don’t want to exercise, play video games, have a beer with my family, or do any of my hobbies. Nothing. 

The only thing I could imagine making me breathe a sigh of relief right now would be waking up far away from everything in another part of the world for a little while. 

None of these things that could blow up my life have happened, I’m just terrified that they’re all going to happen at once. 

I’ve always been a positive guy. The fuck it guy. The glass half full guy. I can see the good in everyone else, every time, even now, but not myself. I feel useless and defeated before something even begins, and I have no idea how to deal with it.",4.282324675324676,4.606349700000003,5.020389610389612,87.0577272727273,70.18181818181819,8.467532467532468,26.168831168831172,8.418075326091056,1.4586558441558446,834,23,182,12,14,270,120,220,0.08199999999999999,0.81,0.107,0.0887,1,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,2,12,13,1,1,11,2,16,8,2,6,3,42,35,13,0,5,8,0,5,3,0,1,4,0,0,3,11,12,1,0,8,5,1,2,10,4,1,2,1,6,19,8,27,29,6,30,0,3,1,1,7,17,1,2,14,121,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727434407737272,0.0,0.0,0.07132672220289675,0.10998311152884577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09854474146847668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08925106850557764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035081943614244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512310826933805,0.11605541434093175,0.0,0.0,0.32440151725580146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08761958728199658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13855368150759134,0.0,0.08837177846299303,0.10022397482037727,0.18853125363613346,0.0,0.09887808103426762,0.0,0.26516996515353103,0.22479377246116186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08921678543320384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09696629443701356,0.0,0.0,0.05960967036789454,0.08797419668621663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31156371012001405,0.18550236561859212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368091975938352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22225426234947895,0.15372739604745375,0.10512427791834043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14002570614257864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21140275029946304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710397613083647,0.0,0.08089528132120888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064185660249776,0.0,0.0,0.1117011777898511,0.0,0.07977125127608423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358234485710685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2687186446486601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358131877692324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807470978296794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393644569331383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12232084714860372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0905886477690688,0.0,0.0,0.061865040182787163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07450867937914321,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,No_ThankYoo,2020/04/16,"How do I stop being so pessimistic? I’m probably the most pessimistic person you’ll ever meet, (at least most of the time) and it’s ruining my life. I can’t ever enjoy anything because I only ever see the bad in everything. I try to tell myself that not *everything* ends unfortunately for me, but then as soon as one bad thing happens, all I can think about is how much I hate my life, and absolutely everything about myself, and that everything is terrible.
I genuinely don’t know how to see the positive in life when it **really** feels like there just isn’t any.",1.5526623376623334,4.220212136363639,3.672467532467533,82.72727272727275,86.72727272727272,7.5064935064935066,22.402597402597397,8.418075326091056,1.9390779220779224,445,16,84,12,14,151,72,110,0.193,0.7090000000000001,0.098,-0.884,0,0,0,0,0,1,18.0,0,1,0,0,13,7,1,0,4,0,9,3,0,3,4,19,17,12,0,0,3,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,3,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,0,3,13,2,11,15,5,12,0,1,2,0,4,3,0,2,10,64,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431908191266573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12623733380832966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25616965814756504,0.09351284909855356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13586924099393025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41628451603846905,0.0,0.0,0.5514737445867554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07756500358152303,0.1095909043089824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1356534821473492,0.0,0.0,0.15145338615384205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430610038257752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3250585458493533,0.07494480014038761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11276861957717005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039496251743355,0.11666964973483257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1339453020168419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539403329653696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09827368407028042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24448414761177334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12825150830389684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340807026737078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191392334815427,0.0982942423772526,0.0,0.0,0.08945033557706107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10415034921568364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Lord_Gains_10111,2020/04/16,"Some Advice Need some advice on a situation for a close friend of mine.

Him and his ex-girlfriend broke up. The day before the breakup they were arguing and she was crying and begging for him not to leave her, because apparently he was getting close to leaving because her behaviour is controlling and abusive (would scream at him, kick his car, hit him at times, etc). The next day, she broke up with him. He tried to reconcile but it never happened. Now it's important to note, everytime they argue, he always apologises and takes the blame. He treats her well; he is always at her place, picks her up from nightouts, and spoils her (£1050 Tag watches, £200 Gucci belts, £100 MK heels, etc).

Anyway he has really had enough and hasn't contacted her in roughly 10 weeks, to which I am positive she is surprised at. They were together for three years.

BUT this is where the concern comes into it. Her social media is very much about a perceived lifestyle of expensive gifts and nice restaurants. Obviously all provided by him and he is no longer there to provide it. About 3 weeks after the breakup it started. First she did makeup like the joker, then as an evil nun, then as a clown holding knifes and now as a witch. This is totally unlike her and odd to say the least.

Although he is concerned (I told him about this), I must admit I am too. He always suspected her to have BPD or bipolar due to her mood swings and unreasonable, not proportionate or necessary reaction to life's little obstacles. I am fascinated by how someone can change so easily.

Any ideas?

I am a former criminology student and find this stuff interesting.",4.785490196078432,6.6470169771241885,5.347205882352942,79.43492647058827,70.40522875816994,8.629411764705884,29.41666666666667,9.188382445141503,2.614545098039216,1289,51,235,27,24,414,186,306,0.11,0.7879999999999999,0.102,-0.5358,1,0,0,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,3,2,12,15,3,0,15,0,24,3,1,3,5,43,33,25,0,3,6,0,1,1,1,2,2,2,0,0,11,18,0,2,6,0,1,2,5,7,1,2,7,4,34,7,36,23,9,34,1,2,1,0,44,15,0,4,18,164,45,1,0.0,0.15903913837180786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2623335931146193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33506725827746786,0.0,0.0,0.09128016373003968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16364921968397986,0.0,0.1142187933870772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16905643178280286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1419962362502623,0.1156261964178608,0.0,0.0,0.15054897468939027,0.0,0.0,0.14744399647218884,0.17313289910675864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13869419681218484,0.2994011115581716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226826602970287,0.11417491972566672,0.0,0.0,0.1037048115854028,0.0,0.07012899010821005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11869805441085515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15152793834865666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2842577640232253,0.0,0.0,0.0948097469895872,0.06557739487447596,0.13453248661970066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09867358751519907,0.0995289291274443,0.10352549922289406,0.0,0.14275381535420928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402404912559272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08599038457603851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10674410221234693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15087875686539973,0.0,0.13682932303424164,0.11373159778009913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09500781139392972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536598230341268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10092332700014968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826987285046058,0.0,0.0,0.12826133808946955,0.0,0.09113252105599824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11075278946234476,0.0,0.0,0.21534043894261715,0.0,0.12068778079400785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953522641022331,0.0,0.0,0.08643892439323872
mentalhealth,super_turtle246,2020/04/16,"Anxiety or PTSD?? Does anyone know how to tell if you just have extreme anxiety or if it is actually crossing over into something more? 

I have long thought that my anxiety might actually boarder on PTSD, therapist are an extreme trigger for me because I had several bad experiences in the past so I'm scared to see anyone and talk to them about it.",6.7304545454545455,7.261761287878787,7.829848484848488,68.31477272727275,64.9090909090909,11.44848484848485,40.74242424242424,11.20814326018867,4.99531515151515,279,16,48,8,4,95,52,66,0.175,0.825,0.0,-0.8839,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,1,0,4,2,0,1,2,0,6,0,0,2,0,12,10,7,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,6,0,9,7,1,7,0,0,1,0,4,4,0,5,2,35,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.3605298068042797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4239422412819781,0.0,0.0,0.258327958923328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15423761651066092,0.1126066144006298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16165404777427753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18069644613320898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10152000103639812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16347576697550045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19596397912606134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763408659549735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4318671603551785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18494189955116908,0.0,0.14720186799233914,0.0,0.0,0.2086866125875246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14221029064177335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484749168091173,0.16145774757254455,0.0,0.0,0.21447990354932647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14665097558785503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thedarkangel_qc,2020/04/16,"Totally exhausted I am totally exhausted. I can't seem to recover. I was off work on Monday for Easter and called in sick yesterday cause was unwell. I was hoping that by two days total rest I would regain some form of energy. Nope.

I sleep between 9 and 10 hours a night. At bed at 8 pm. I take pills for sleep, Zopiclone And Quetiapine. Whatever you say against them, they saved my life. I eat well. Work has been intense, 7 days a week, in the past month, with workload increased because of pandemic. I'm working mostly from home. I'm quite isolated. I live alone and didn't see any human being since Friday except for the grocery delivery guy.

I've had depression and anxiety issues for several years. In the past year, it was going much better, finally some stability in my life after some job and apartment problems. I found someone also, but we are now in a long distance relationship. Not able to see each other now because of the situation. But it greatly help to bring some balance in my life. But been working a lot. Maybe it's catching back on me.

In the last days, I've had this huge brain fog. Trouble to move, like this very heavy weight against me. I feel like my face is being stretched by ghost hands. Not sure how to describe it exactly.

I'm not sure what to do. My hours are flexible as long as the job is done. I tried to alternate between naps and work..I'm just so so so tired.

Just I be off work for some time? That would be bad for my finances, I can just make ends meet with my actual revenue. That's a stress also.",1.694667182662542,4.177396934210531,3.2292956656346767,87.83536377708981,82.94736842105263,6.602786377708977,24.072755417956657,7.827709963407826,1.4649318111455112,1204,46,240,23,34,395,183,304,0.13,0.7809999999999999,0.08900000000000001,-0.9332,3,1,0,0,0,0,44.0,1,1,2,7,13,16,0,1,11,0,25,15,5,3,6,45,38,18,1,4,10,0,3,2,0,2,8,1,2,2,11,11,2,0,3,1,1,5,6,7,1,1,11,6,27,9,42,21,15,45,0,1,2,0,11,16,0,9,26,158,38,8,0.09667685287137226,0.0,0.09434266259877366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10012806336142673,0.0,0.15462488862570298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06574357514307838,0.0,0.07395752783041698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433853235209438,0.08072113395275364,0.11786662437656426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550282000361277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10792334075933248,0.09871787590181667,0.0,0.0,0.09931375876365778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18704571667663966,0.0,0.0832676317161327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989339859738008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09892455589019207,0.0,0.0,0.08562699643384178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04888272162617515,0.06906596300825693,0.0,0.1059047667933528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10600117916934894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494368340574956,0.0,0.0,0.1065865715899604,0.0,0.09572528385581486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06480045661908393,0.0,0.09697476597875443,0.09602192871744833,0.19041445201856436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10090551696279328,0.19187371798344008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07880453837783538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048571607717732,0.09446285395298026,0.0,0.08536743228747366,0.1711119450960448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08219120311426573,0.0,0.0,0.06453254999970656,0.0,0.09712489296150824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07716654161095213,0.10275219477547007,0.07106861064171964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090724677350163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18457799055928886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250669170373103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282773321774476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379475968167244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688131372806002,0.0,0.0,0.1540778698882949,0.08801097592543551,0.0,0.10921732577253372,0.0,0.07997209172623089,0.1086688332287717,0.19349334347663347,0.0,0.08191398370966814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11074300832716696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1822335794154213,0.0,0.07268896177648132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056373050363953466,0.11111582063606547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563723706437076,0.0,0.09443923755918568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07976852843798066,0.0,0.0,0.07754833991554494,0.1177263619015287,0.08692410115464168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4222914018367173,0.0,0.0,0.1373529249708126,0.0,0.0,0.12451344714807053
mentalhealth,I-have-an-elephant,2020/04/17,"I've been really sad because of what's going on but I can guarantee it's not about what you think A few years ago I got into a lot of trouble and that resulted in my mum taking away my ps4, now this isn't for a week or a month, this is forever, obviously I was pissed, I was really Angry for a while,(I was 11 when this  happened) it was like just after Christmas as well. So I get used to it after a few months but the thing is I had to make up a lie to tell my friends why I don't play anymore and they still don't know, I used to play all the time with them when I had the chance, obviously I'm still not happy about it. Up until August of the next year i thought she had gotten rid of it. Until one day when I was cleaning the house and I found it in a cupboard. I raced upstairs pleading to have it back and she said maybe, now we all know when parents say maybe they mean no. So fast forward 2 years later and we're in quarantine and no body had anything g to do, this is when it's really bad cuz it's been sitting in my living room since then and I'm not allowed to use it, all my friends are going on and playing basically all day and I'm just sitting with my thumb up my ass all day trynna find something to do, now I get slightly depressed every now and then but it's never been worse than this and I know I'm not gonna get it back. I'm not asking what I should do or anything i just wanna get it off my back. Thanks, I'm not making a tldr cuz I don't know how to summarise this.  

(Edit: I know this is a pissy little thing to be complaining about and that there's other people with much worse things going on, but for me this is really hard and id appreciate if took it seriously, sounds like something of im14andthisisdeep lol)",1.8764800000000008,3.125114021333335,3.7282000000000046,90.59710000000004,76.78666666666666,6.6000000000000005,22.36666666666667,7.1686216300943375,0.5567866666666665,1358,37,311,15,30,459,175,375,0.133,0.767,0.1,-0.9283,2,1,2,0,0,0,27.0,1,1,3,0,25,17,1,0,15,1,29,3,3,10,8,65,65,35,0,3,16,2,1,2,2,2,0,3,2,0,31,18,0,0,10,3,0,5,13,7,1,1,18,4,35,10,44,44,9,58,0,2,0,1,16,16,2,4,39,219,66,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873807941043747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09927842104801958,0.0,0.0,0.16475769618879335,0.0,0.0935857553637094,0.0,0.09405304176070488,0.23092639602601875,0.08358447029217647,0.061023791919278286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119538725632387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19368059370905455,0.0,0.08622129730673292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08434376554639844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149522556265836,0.0,0.0,0.10976124810637496,0.15468355682810733,0.0,0.2092053678293938,0.0,0.1706779296259116,0.0,0.08006404881063603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08852355529196912,0.10656487915078712,0.08967546522797573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155090793638824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2750786644223728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978136359502633,0.10033268091002542,0.0883955819070641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08510668567916263,0.0,0.0,0.1336432912720464,0.0,0.201140205367372,0.10904496597193633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598075792296424,0.0,0.07358955311958218,0.0,0.07720804945012194,0.0,0.10646404719412328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06783453138124672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1111560547255158,0.0,0.0,0.06940101355278343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25652230279179666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09522389150127772,0.07960844414162642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828088580743523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15413324041567364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15988983292739048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07526738127503961,0.0,0.08749720470742801,0.09216431140497118,0.0,0.0,0.19951827300825686,0.06414399145694888,0.0,0.07947311680282941,0.05837271260563725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1112216379605259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25937876779743263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802991310512599,0.0,0.09000746886046987,0.0,0.09033024766821476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.204033478540946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19339527360113398
mentalhealth,PineappleFeet,2020/04/17,"Need Help for my Little Brother Hi, everyone. I hope you guys are doing well. My little brother recently had a mental breakdown and we admitted him to a psychiatrist hospital for teenagers. None of my family have ever been in and have no idea what he's going through. I was hoping to have someone whose been in his shoes talk to him. I asked him and he said he would appreciate being able to talk to someone who knows how he is feeling. I want to be able to help him but I know there are things I can't help with since I'm not in his shoes. He's taking zyprexa and is telling me he doesn't feel himself.

I am in California USA.",1.9817441860465088,3.963529596899225,3.6040503875968986,88.37026162790701,78.6124031007752,6.7806201550387595,24.703488372093023,7.793537801064563,1.2705395348837212,494,18,105,8,12,164,82,129,0.013000000000000001,0.841,0.146,0.8885,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,2,0,18,2,2,1,1,21,32,6,0,5,2,2,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,4,6,0,0,6,0,0,1,5,0,1,0,5,3,20,3,16,24,1,9,0,0,0,0,30,6,0,2,2,72,24,0,0.32735520623284764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15301646406156935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805576273842935,0.0,0.156400964027328,0.0,0.0,0.15430067728452818,0.0,0.1655206281947344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09302175380290767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1620665604413637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3291289415794232,0.0,0.0,0.3251375830365289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847720910121174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17990586026733174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3280959159437037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16494852655824874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213648687594498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616118868642986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569488235768733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13539580469558646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27736700393329544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12306518761451005,0.2631157147751393,0.1430614395061422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874012657426656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09654129105853468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471658220915706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11627187311405443,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sp-oph,2020/04/17,"Bulimia/ADHD and meds Hi, I'm 20F and I have multiple diagnosed mental disorders. For background, I had severe social anxiety and depression when I was in high school, and which got better through therapy and medication (I was on celexa for over three years). Anyways, I was diagnosed with minor bipolar 1 and bulimia last summer. Not much was done for the bulimia other than suggested therapy, and I started taking lamotrigine for bipolar which has been working okay. As of recent it's come to my attention that I might have ADHD, I realized that my behaviors that I thought were normal are actually symptoms of ADHD. It felt relieving to figure this out, and I have been researching medication, and I came across vyvanse which also helps binge eating. I had my bulimia kind of under control for 6 months or so, but in quarantine I've been focusing and stressing about food a lot more, and the b/p urges have come back full force, which has been really rough because I had gotten so much better. There's a lot of information on vyvanse helping BED, but not specifically bulimia. Obviously this is something to talk about with my psychiatrist and get an actual diagnosis which I'm aware of, and I do have a zoom appointment next week lol.  I'm in therapy as well but it only does so much. All my shit aside, I just wanted to ask if anyone has experience with vyvanse helping control b/p urges along with helping ADHD. I read a lot about vyvanse helping people not obsess over food, and it would be life changing if that could happen for me. Thank you!",5.689955357142857,7.337399156250001,6.76204365079365,71.00875000000002,67.85416666666666,10.346825396825398,33.15873015873016,10.504223727775694,3.952577182539682,1239,56,206,35,21,415,162,288,0.047,0.8340000000000001,0.11800000000000001,0.9542,0,1,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,1,0,5,13,11,1,2,7,2,28,12,1,2,2,51,45,27,0,6,10,0,2,0,0,2,8,0,1,0,16,23,3,2,6,1,0,3,3,4,1,1,18,2,23,7,37,23,9,25,0,1,0,0,12,12,1,7,10,154,39,4,0.0,0.0,0.17232000943125494,0.0,0.42443806853935256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07060687480171414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754294156107174,0.0,0.0,0.061735639436589725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08254086098951027,0.0,0.0,0.06789090027328247,0.0,0.05382182690396039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561737430719172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098223255091428,0.0,0.0,0.09340095679324076,0.15211103703844028,0.0,0.0,0.19805339425261645,0.07049377224481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07604554868069183,0.1792285207889006,0.0,0.0,0.1011899864629972,0.0,0.07726469909375988,0.09035310710161472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09034449492101887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08636626629534813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477391906238392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135254516660906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04612879149491144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07061497230484216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07807609655181645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2959004703746648,0.09328507379943317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919422634052528,0.0,0.07196955450709741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062363069022092925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22518744710519595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09807222227922617,0.17788928417549044,0.08897731028205358,0.09366358646046986,0.0,0.0,0.07047362673411259,0.0,0.19471376976284066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09389927009381656,0.0,0.08650716181176668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714984896199656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0612103774760232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831563577885365,0.0,0.056561951263732126,0.0,0.08717744439938876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08935595736387858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09974453809523973,0.09063020517656116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0900023129221918,0.0,0.06797129713581562,0.0,0.0,0.06249334997432654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10113789304707953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09176892705226047,0.06638440252710343,0.07096555841426253,0.0,0.08128717438147241,0.3029079077095897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009378148342862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05207675745143366,0.0,0.07082231038176452,0.0,0.0793848801706701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427744029294451,0.0,0.0,0.06271992085659174,0.0,0.0,0.056856987591403015
mentalhealth,thisworldisaweirdone,2020/04/17,"Someone help me Trapped within this 3 dimensional prison.
For no fucking reason. No body wants to fucking listen. Nobody really cares, they say imma grow out of it. Nah cause u cant grow out of your own existence. Why am I here. Nobody knows.
Everybody asks themselves the same question and then acts like they fucking know.
But all I rlly know is pain, and nothing fucking else cause I was crying the first time I took my first breath for my self.
Yeah my life could be worse, and that thought keeps me depressed , but I'm so scared of death scared of what to could come next. I cant even end it all cause if hell was real I would go there. Says all preverlant religions so why should I care.
I feel like the worlds neglected me so i feel to neglect the world. But I've neglected myself so have nothing to own. I feel all alone even though I'm surrounded by people. Drugs drugs drugs oh I guess they're my best friend cause they never failed to make me happy. But they're also my worst enemy cause they backstab me and run away when the comedown appears and I'm left in a worse way. 
My mental state is deteriorating every day I got some loose screws. But these ones cant be fixed cause they are what holds my whole existence in two. Fuck god please please please take me to heaven cause i hate living in hell even if this is a lesson. 
If life all had a meaning I dont even care just make me happy forever I dont wanna care no more. I dont wanna watch everyone I love die and then watch myself die too. I dont wanna work a shit job for money just to survive in this shit shit life cause my basic survival instincts depend on it. I dont wanna do anything. I just want happiness. But ffs the things that make u happy kill you. What sort of sadistic fucking reality is this I mean seriously. The one thing that make you feel good and okay fucking kill you what a joke. And we lie to our self saying this life is great. I think we are in hell . That we've been judged already and this is our punishment. Cause if I live in a world where the things that feel good kill u then I guess we r not supposed to feel good. Fuck sake fuck this all. Theres no way out. I'm a slave to existence. It never ends even after death u just probably carry on. I love sleeping it's the best part of existence cause I dont remember it fuck everything.
All i want is love tbh maybe if I feel more loved I'll feel at place. But i dont sorry maybe I am just selfish and ignorant well so be it cause that doesn't change the fact that I still feel this way. My heart is fucking broken and I truly weep for humanity. Well fucking done humans well done cause you've made the planet fucking shit for everyone you little cunts. And fuck pain and suffering fuck it all it's not fair it's not fucking fair. I'm going mental I'm going fucking insane inside my head. And no one knows no one but me. Maybe I'm not alone maybe someone else feels my pain. Fuck this fuck life fuck it all fuck sake so tired of this shit.",1.0222084308579795,3.3522929396411136,2.3119767359387207,94.31034021325392,84.53017944535074,5.315450268340545,18.508854055843198,6.7026698264267655,-0.009520254391564452,2344,59,510,27,69,750,255,613,0.297,0.513,0.19,-0.9985,1,3,3,0,0,0,50.0,5,5,5,9,28,79,36,2,18,2,38,48,10,19,12,119,114,39,7,16,22,0,10,2,1,2,12,4,0,4,36,21,0,6,22,1,1,10,23,52,3,7,10,16,68,27,42,97,20,51,4,7,2,26,31,22,31,12,17,299,104,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06708449500510304,0.035738882705569686,0.025899164081584658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02665101277490876,0.0,0.030276645272943013,0.0,0.030427820678085808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0679744582504074,0.0,0.0,0.03597367230582564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207920870178608,0.3992335293454941,0.034260214917576484,0.02789776999719952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05171535432563485,0.0,0.03557462606643031,0.02088636462957545,0.0,0.027894112981014664,0.0,0.06722334752925739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06628447874735569,0.2656939951351171,0.0,0.11267283280015228,0.0,0.05410888597353165,0.0,0.05736896951490369,0.0,0.0,0.1069536160016772,0.0,0.027286698285525924,0.06189264060233918,0.029106551462667614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16375392595630156,0.023136646684784257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05509522493405043,0.0,0.0,0.025021431741618517,0.628749261245224,0.0,0.0,0.05521732566159236,0.0814918089340104,0.02590213431023099,0.03570580559232276,0.07135391277521956,0.0,0.0,0.1379024844994119,0.0,0.03197458317139218,0.03323749689271124,0.0,0.0,0.03837770164033099,0.021707729893365783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03213822140254572,0.028786266638254506,0.10749131194593722,0.0,0.07119424628249106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03518760818745252,0.0,0.11437635228653135,0.03164443933816132,0.032459394887506474,0.05719506492616035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1169189311737828,0.03064452462316718,0.08647193170001187,0.0,0.1301448201036019,0.07055594605613913,0.0,0.0,0.06527517228328113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04995633611829898,0.0,0.034443000205438216,0.0,0.0,0.0621507006822891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08778267743438012,0.0,0.10338332772327499,0.0,0.0,0.0350710060223163,0.0,0.022452454016684116,0.0,0.03383659664124157,0.106650685128862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03491770905881442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0362798601739101,0.0,0.0,0.0368624885475797,0.020747374255947512,0.03329831962724416,0.0,0.0,0.03668715445646578,0.0,0.0,0.07726421445143059,0.06484830087756276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06757156118885695,0.0,0.16621940577367522,0.0,0.0,0.03240950338549009,0.0,0.054881299473293066,0.0,0.0,0.0362536037159014,0.0,0.0,0.025863592891242158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02435032761803636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0645476862783721,0.0207517144910049,0.03181919308350173,0.025710957365499863,0.01888460381937208,0.037223074451870855,0.0,0.0,0.0359821648724155,0.0,0.0,0.0316365280004286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0573065083191654,0.07711977077143377,0.0,0.0,0.08735701911085891,0.0,0.05844686203447925,0.036157940287760884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0235774770879792,0.0,0.06600843503993703,0.0230061665526292,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hchinnis,2020/04/17,"Resources/Education for COVID-19 Hi everyone, I am a registered nurse in an ambulatory surgery center that is currently shut down. I am working on some research about the Coronavirus, management plans, safety for medical personnel etc., and I’ve come across some free courses aimed at medical professionals-

COVID-19: Tackling the Novel Coronavirus   
 https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/covid19-novel-coronavirus

COVID-19 Diagnostics and Testing

[https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/covid-19-diagnostics-and-testing](https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/covid-19-diagnostics-and-testing)

COVID-19 Critical Care: Understanding and Application

[https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/covid-19-critical-care-education-resource](https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/covid-19-critical-care-education-resource)

Managing COVID-19 in General Practice

[https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/management-of-covid-19-in-general-practice/1?utm\_source=facebook&utm\_medium=post&utm\_campaign=airway-matters](https://www.futurelearn.com/courses/management-of-covid-19-in-general-practice/1?utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=post&utm_campaign=airway-matters) 

I am wondering if anyone has done these or similar courses? Has your workplace provided you with recommendations on relevant courses to do? Are you aware of any central resource that lists courses for medical personnel? What is everyone doing training wise?

While I understand this may not relate to this group, my research team wanted to get as much feedback as possible. Even if you are not a healthcare worker, I would love to hear of what resources/education you are using to keep yourself abreast of the constantly changing information. Thank you for your time!",27.84939215686275,34.78722960588235,18.46323529411765,-12.077107843137245,20.58823529411764,13.901960784313724,50.63725490196078,12.885471636013053,8.16878431372549,1523,62,106,35,12,411,116,170,0.013000000000000001,0.8590000000000001,0.128,0.9655,1,0,0,0,0,0,141.0,0,7,0,4,2,5,0,0,6,0,15,4,0,1,0,22,27,9,0,4,5,0,0,0,0,2,3,1,0,0,7,5,0,1,4,2,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,13,6,23,24,4,14,0,0,0,1,13,9,0,7,4,78,20,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5372032184597271,0.0,0.08429089776220013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08666938758291752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3791287691290935,0.0,0.1311236718175294,0.10677276970837153,0.0,0.13394694463890722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12684485866148634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13823807634086036,0.08186843473131389,0.0,0.0,0.23688089271436194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06475925648928398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1397017312902322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11017330126525038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11187057347254296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3746026312618607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09111821163765056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13973607431264856,0.2374214974557031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11411738318875357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227679684942769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580746246195201,0.0,0.1070538251540238,0.0,0.0,0.0731094828985417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344195199593976,0.09023776924363196,0.0,0.0,0.08805119991464919,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ZarakiTaicho88,2020/04/17,"Losing my mind. I wouldn't normal post something like this, but I'm really struggling. I have severe anxiety, clinical depression, ADHD, and abandonment issues. I struggle to talk to people on a daily basis and feel isolated in normal circumstances, but it is almost more than I can stand with quarantine. 
I haven't had physical human contact in weeks, I barely speak at all anymore, and my anxiety and paranoia are through the roof. The loneliness and isolation combined with my conditions are slowly driving me insane. Not to mention that my state decided that mental health care was 'non-essential' so I can't even talk to a therapist and get help. I feel like I'm drowning and don't know what to do. I want to have people to talk to and to keep me company, but my anxiety and related issues keep me from being able to engage and to talk. I don't want to burden people with my problems, so I keep it to myself, but it feels like it's killing me. I just want to stop hurting and stop being so painfully alone. 
I'm sorry if this is rambling, I am just in a rough place and I can't even keep my own head straight anymore. I don't really know what I wanted out of this, maybe just to vent, maybe someone has advice that might actually get through all my shit. I dunno. I guess I'll see what happens when this posts.",4.704457364341085,5.8139020038759694,5.7790697674418645,79.15875968992252,69.65891472868215,8.989147286821705,29.837209302325586,9.2995712137729,2.6612232558139537,1039,40,193,21,18,345,135,258,0.262,0.64,0.098,-0.9945,0,3,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,0,1,9,16,2,2,5,0,22,5,2,0,2,53,44,21,2,9,9,0,4,3,0,2,3,1,0,1,14,16,0,7,6,0,0,1,8,11,0,0,2,6,31,5,29,38,4,17,0,4,1,0,9,8,1,5,7,132,45,0,0.0964053221764916,0.0,0.0940776878093438,0.0,0.11586046286277547,0.09420616507759813,0.0,0.0,0.09653600443982002,0.09984683945090334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22124942277613646,0.0,0.19121634943249866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09829165103684853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303376272650984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12734961215464993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14623628264477692,0.1377439628511596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007356037085608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10620133120953147,0.0,0.08525090801720575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09893967348920167,0.10247434935750703,0.0,0.0,0.06461845531792683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10320389129223327,0.0,0.0,0.2012442189264543,0.0,0.3427579196298106,0.10665820535149034,0.0,0.1059636877024299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14129631238354987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10785289598910727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19370420776458935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09715388998013692,0.1022708120225222,0.0973418933301422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889134938899011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258205987638667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2005059355052565,0.0,0.1007230428475619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18465929950530247,0.0,0.0,0.0922468734997516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235194359712369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07682256013552516,0.0,0.0,0.10891057337545808,0.09895867783246326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08168391663304618,0.07421752694936394,0.0,0.10791786535660516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16119833216824006,0.0,0.20156754915684968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30994778478705515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193400948646436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274494271818571,0.0,0.07733053437059073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MiserableTaproot,2020/04/17,"How can I ask for help? I know this question gets asked a lot but I am having an issue with a specific situation that I couldn't find anything about on this subreddit. 

Basically I have no idea what is going on with me or if something is going on at all. I have tried to see a psychologist a couple of times, after being prompted by my GP and parents, but when I'm sitting in their office I genuinely don't know what to say. All I feel is this intense need to cry but I don't know why and I try not it because when they ask me why I cried, I don't have an answer. 

This makes me feel like a fraud and that I am probably just fine and overreacting. I also have the feeling that they think the same.

Because of all these I completely blank out and I just say very generic things or I just focus on a specific issue that comes to my mind first without necessarily meaning it. However, after the appointment I can usually think of a million things I should have said. 

So my question is this. How can I actually ask for help when I don't know exactly what the problem is or if there is a problem at all? And how can I say everything that's on my mind during an appointment when I'm convinced I'm just faking it and I don't know how to phrase all the things that are going on in my mind? 

Thanks for your time",3.084448529411766,4.137953253676475,4.854441176470591,84.48173529411766,73.44852941176471,8.08705882352941,26.835294117647056,8.548686976883017,1.7511994117647065,1023,36,220,18,20,349,125,272,0.102,0.8170000000000001,0.08199999999999999,-0.8529,2,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,3,1,16,7,0,0,16,0,27,0,0,5,6,62,55,25,0,7,14,1,3,1,0,1,0,4,0,0,21,11,0,0,16,0,0,4,9,3,0,2,1,8,35,4,29,51,7,26,0,0,1,0,17,11,0,8,11,169,56,0,0.0,0.0,0.0989817532376628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08111411183846201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346884185228727,0.0,0.3792961321881671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366245352448878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08737358582185074,0.10634818234914156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223116478954193,0.2228337708718308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09115939275636706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15385926227771082,0.0724621281538189,0.0,0.0,0.09270584245093788,0.08627692042469094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05299336591230211,0.0,0.17293625056879192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597374994674813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450293909062073,0.0,0.211734642741784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787183611902335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049553927367218566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08623277275480057,0.0,0.0,0.0677057946417459,0.0,0.0,0.11048779183061552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3072483440967628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07520959523261073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11262681340453642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10935947387404067,0.19411100511319,0.0,0.0,0.2272512445853619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09648384414372677,0.2419853440976689,0.0,0.0,0.08082715325476815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1140123814505828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07808632534952574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09338378128656737,0.0,0.0,0.20215819426468076,0.12998542229091226,0.0,0.0,0.1182901395121683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772960447253635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11171161039759417,0.08369096843872967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18305090035870514,0.0,0.0,0.0977755965659577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Madisonbecau,2020/04/17,"Ny ex is suicidal My exboyfriend tried to kill himself (after I broke up with him) he texted me and I called an ambulance. He was in a hospital for one week, after that he was allowed to go home (to a friend, because of the break up) under the condition to go to therapy. I know that he already has a flat. 
Shortly after that our country shut down. Therapy stoped and he lost his job. This is probably the worst time of his life and he already had a horrible childhood, no family, no money, nothing. 
We have been together for almost 6 years  my family was his family and he lost them too. Everything else like our dog is also mine because I brought her into our relationship.
He texts me strange things which sound very suicidal to me. I don't know what to do. The clinic won't do anything because of the virus. I am his ex so I can't even do anything. 

I don't want him in my life anymore but I want him to have a good life. He is a really good guy. I couldn't live with myself if he kills himself after everything.",2.053673990802249,4.019215271844661,3.9325958099131344,86.17880684721514,78.32038834951456,7.637812979049567,25.890648952478283,8.532816995589336,1.8990135922330096,790,31,163,17,19,267,114,206,0.145,0.799,0.055999999999999994,-0.9117,2,0,0,0,0,1,24.0,4,0,1,2,4,10,2,0,12,0,21,4,0,1,0,17,30,8,4,4,2,2,0,1,2,1,4,1,1,1,7,8,0,0,2,0,1,3,7,6,0,1,8,1,33,4,26,20,1,21,0,3,0,0,32,9,0,2,9,113,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12011051888906653,0.0,0.26473103243244184,0.09592231104340884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1189561090894746,0.0,0.0,0.1974138415404984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21935742244808407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12248024081971293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10020109865738716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922447217997214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2156029186122026,0.0,0.3392286813979388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09267146811033684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13633833819016414,0.20121325459087705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11876730239674675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12031754717176367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11902980575148772,0.0,0.2654092110582488,0.0,0.1318404836329435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2541682968333366,0.05860049659185116,0.0,0.10591621395024256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261874655417837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11509326755938235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127981720335734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293241487915202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07684171120133088,0.0,0.0,0.12877918052328674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624071198273241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27434180805032177,0.0,0.07968807050840725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994259875674412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0814367664310408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896959880533847,0.1414967859834325,0.0,0.0962149890408056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07724253005178175
mentalhealth,AlphaHorseJack,2020/04/17,"What’s the point? Why can’t I be good at anything? It seems no matter what I do I can’t get into anything, when I was a kid everyone called me smart and mature but now as a 17 yr old in just as dumb as ever, I’m not good at anything in school even though I study, I used to find enjoyment in video games but now even with this quarantine I’m playing all day every day and I just can’t get better, I’m still bad and can’t keep up, I want to try driving but I have to be like 21 to get a job as a delivery driver so what’s the point if I can’t find ANYTHING that I’m good at, enjoy, or am considered for employment?",3.3003571428571448,2.457988750000002,5.226428571428574,88.76107142857146,72.21428571428571,8.714285714285714,26.07142857142857,8.07648339933343,1.1891428571428566,475,12,120,6,8,166,81,140,0.07400000000000001,0.6859999999999999,0.24,0.9688,2,1,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,11,11,1,0,6,0,11,0,0,1,2,22,22,15,0,2,8,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,1,3,3,0,1,7,2,0,0,1,0,11,9,18,19,1,19,0,0,0,0,3,10,1,3,9,74,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.497080084474215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12608872457757048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355785522476973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15420015126091194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947805132607041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1994840230874433,0.1365990129828878,0.12723413555939508,0.1442984516141353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760444914182231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23669263481764374,0.0,0.0,0.3799851398800469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14985612314767974,0.13422641733255686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07377684251722708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15846170657197728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855103307557573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15283222111901304,0.0,0.13747566665454242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059839008528425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836853780599474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1025272453566644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042589490511,0.0,0.0,0.08907079891235192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1362648549359453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,slothsonfire,2020/04/17,"Have people who have been/currently are suicidal been able to find love? 

Xposted to r/mentalillness. 

F24. Looking for help. Feeling very hopeless about finding someone who will love me given my history with suicidal ideation; i was at one point severely suicidal with a plan and everything. Right now im still depressed and lack self-esteem, but not actively suicidal and im in therapy/ might get medication. Please tell me theres hope in me finding someone who accepts me.",5.3514285714285705,8.260678666666667,5.643095238095237,73.30607142857146,71.85714285714286,9.914285714285716,37.88095238095238,10.125756701596842,4.899409523809523,384,23,59,12,8,122,63,84,0.242,0.583,0.175,-0.7808,1,0,0,0,0,1,13.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,0,0,15,14,4,4,2,2,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,3,2,6,4,9,9,1,7,0,2,1,2,7,5,0,2,2,36,9,0,0.13565521771607508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683964024131775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12191816258427512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06859135406047849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3719592341730318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087425229401575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09092683294582024,0.0,0.0,0.13473623994580908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29306182737119113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11391621724188533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448682606441364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665836019621674,0.0,0.14390874858046065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09192348630904136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09404624737949548,0.0,0.0,0.14890869255491934,0.12823802838302148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158488147220112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415179773815315,0.15325178329659728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22988045150602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833443210104593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5935391617944152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11856863952960388,0.0,0.15513356392778485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11192976157945962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jsb217118,2020/04/17,"I hate happy people I just hate being around them.  I told my grandma about this and she wasn’t pleased, in a felt bad for me kind of way.  Happy people just seem so fake to me.  Like they are putting on some kind of act.  I know it’s probably just my imagination but I can’t shake the impression.",-0.9333870967741936,1.144568241935488,1.1021935483870955,98.20329032258064,100.45161290322581,4.415483870967742,15.877419354838713,6.2581,-0.4422309677419354,229,6,53,3,10,75,48,62,0.17600000000000002,0.659,0.165,-0.18899999999999997,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,2,0,6,11,2,1,2,0,4,0,0,0,0,11,10,3,0,0,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,4,0,0,3,2,5,0,0,3,1,12,6,8,6,1,7,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,2,1,35,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840522918224705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17262851284530306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19851345629937925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4401807308231924,0.0,0.4082477683920301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4305988608391089,0.11362498461427978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10100813255776717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28667032805722314,0.0,0.0,0.2269505957693211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229126291375277,0.0,0.0,0.20784193687211705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18821841498119116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975595136796178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410938102294334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OneDayOldAcc,2020/04/17,"How to overcome/avoid panick attacks relating to seeing your own blood? My mum (49) is a nurse. She sees blood and death every single working day. She can act swiftly in most medical emergencies other people face, even off work and even when drunk. However, she has a deep-rooted fear of seeing her own blood, often leading to hyperventilation and temporary loss of consciousness. This may be caused by something as insignifcant as stumbling on a staircase and hitting your knee. The last time this happened, she described that she had believed her bone to be sticking out of her flesh, despite it being only a graze. She is deeply upset by the thought that a small wound like this could give her a panick attack. Is there any method to overcome or avoid such panick attacks, even when their usual initiators occur? Would confrontational therapy help? Please advise.",7.174497290788679,9.184600417218544,6.2523780854906725,74.6859241420831,64.69536423841059,8.404816375677303,32.27031908488862,8.841846274778883,2.9393390728476816,697,28,106,11,11,211,107,151,0.17300000000000001,0.77,0.057999999999999996,-0.9597,1,2,2,0,0,0,21.0,0,2,1,4,9,9,4,3,8,0,12,10,7,3,0,17,19,10,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,7,5,1,1,2,1,0,2,0,8,0,0,2,3,14,1,16,10,4,13,0,1,3,0,17,5,0,4,7,75,21,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073247558831947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5386378536571015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17781198536492634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16212724805359546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260084756810481,0.0,0.0,0.1017824978214167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3127209463422441,0.0,0.13297231749308258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17759426244130844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513977848965006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139561972644258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10578513828350776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1286464544327336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07710413312988845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15898963004208255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12003117212296377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10941429456817164,0.0,0.0,0.17324178268613716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3772924518504423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12149952072934075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18048385697424085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12529348732784815,0.0920276065841443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17381925788486294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22979341334907305,0.0,0.0,0.112112621729602,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,blackbirds28,2020/04/17,"Therapy during a pandemic? I wanna seek professional help cause my mental health’s been really shit for years but lately it’s gotten worse. But if we’re quarantined, what options do I have?",3.669000000000002,6.689136971428574,5.3539285714285745,72.26232142857145,79.28571428571428,9.214285714285714,23.035714285714285,9.516144504307137,2.9628571428571435,154,5,24,5,4,52,32,35,0.2,0.747,0.053,-0.7275,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,2,1,1,0,6,4,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,3,0,2,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,2,2,14,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3396512500494513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3514475027496716,0.0,0.0,0.22161638395767905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3729685154011385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3332003787290611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118120172770777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33939010511102785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3781077417337179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3369433551116489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2129168631732635
mentalhealth,lepantosaure,2020/04/17,"Help with internalised homophobia So basically I recently came out as Pansexual. I’m proud, but I sometimes feel so much hate towards myself. These thoughts are killing me.

Can y’all help me",3.442058823529408,6.6533285000000015,4.414941176470588,75.52123529411767,87.52941176470587,8.60235294117647,33.270588235294106,8.841846274778883,4.040195294117648,155,9,26,5,5,50,29,34,0.263,0.568,0.16899999999999998,-0.7974,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,2,3,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,6,7,4,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,6,1,4,5,1,4,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,17,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3881327424162464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17158853877447594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350436926786245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4549262108693044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754470219068554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24946563217165565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3350730095466506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3356316609028633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694106769700443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,piury28,2020/04/17,"I live in a super-conscious state all the time and it prevents me from being in touch with the real world Since i was a child i have always been an introvert overthinker person. Whenever i do something i tend to analize weather it is good or bad for me. I even analize my way of thinking. You would think this mental process can be positive for self growth but i am tired. It has reached a point where i do not want to learn more about myslelf. I just want to enjoy life and be able to simply ""go with the flow"".  And my overthinking mind just can't stop looking for conclusions, finding more and more weak points of myself, thinking about how should i be or talk or think. This prevents me from being happy. And i cant stop.",2.752211538461537,4.802532319444449,3.234166666666667,91.60442307692308,76.5,5.819658119658119,24.96581196581197,6.67199483983844,0.8161587606837606,570,20,116,5,13,177,94,144,0.09,0.748,0.162,0.8322,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,1,7,5,0,0,7,0,18,5,2,1,1,35,27,10,0,4,7,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,5,7,0,6,7,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,2,2,18,3,17,18,4,14,0,0,1,0,5,6,0,3,3,84,23,1,0.17667778331541775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701006908055606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1475185692324346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11669400959197412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16148029316237206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041005579926618,0.1481889422243191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18807678564929356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247927433384786,0.0,0.0,0.15600971955455611,0.0,0.14836484054817814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17804965052381966,0.0,0.17839419597405934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15426822561123574,0.0,0.0,0.3340352250788071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20109799710221327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18431345999076568,0.0,0.0,0.1461496880963496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13601518929173184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954210759182746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14200690979344727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4528319584492141,0.0,0.0,0.1030222362563169,0.2030651215692076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20841826832591195,0.14023860072188385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12550682813402805,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,It-is-me-yay,2020/04/17,How did you get rid of your “brain fog” I always feel like I have a “brain fog” always too tiered to study and focus. What gives you a clear mind? I think exercising might be helpful... any experiences ?,1.0684615384615377,3.623828153846155,2.2776410256410284,92.62569230769232,87.97435897435898,5.171282051282052,15.492307692307696,6.742157984588678,-0.34776307692307684,154,3,33,2,5,49,32,39,0.0,0.8540000000000001,0.146,0.6662,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,4,3,2,1,1,7,8,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,6,1,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,1,18,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4389078628858836,0.0,0.0,0.1793531623736664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5888451431791345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25798964872505475,0.0,0.0,0.13335555132202392,0.18841687345044988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13779397008070607,0.2530047357117475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1767802677690839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885070173349492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797878941140119,0.2663035797341036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16899480795127148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,almostbunnyA,2020/04/17,"Am I experiencing emotional numbing? I have been in a secret long-distance relationship for almost 3 years now. My plan has been to tell my close ones about it soon, but never tell when the relationship actually started. This is creating a lot of pressure, keeping the start of the relationship as a secret.
Now I have been wondering why I feel almost like being in a coma whenever I meet with my partner: I come back to ”reality” when they leave back home, I don’t feel as strongly about the nice things they do or say to me as I would from other people and I still cannot feel love even though I care very much about them and thus love them as a person like I do my best friends. I feel extremely uneasy if there is a small convenience (e.g. they are not happy about something I did).
So, how unhealthy is this really and what can I do about it?

Edit. I also feel quite numb sexually (lack of arousal) but it might also happen for another physical health-related reasons.",6.356305609284334,6.487842212765957,7.143539651837525,74.2877272727273,65.70212765957447,10.45338491295938,31.984526112185684,10.230975488527342,3.14196170212766,768,28,145,17,11,256,116,188,0.153,0.7,0.147,-0.2929,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,5,4,20,13,0,1,10,0,21,6,1,3,1,30,35,18,0,3,5,0,5,2,2,2,3,1,1,2,8,6,0,1,9,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,4,7,25,10,21,28,4,17,0,0,0,3,19,4,0,7,14,114,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.1228531819853832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.252126845328549,0.0,0.0,0.20135280326559307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200954475789484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936075364423065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321166937672657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12835606798655186,0.0,0.0,0.10844547291371846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161242006609406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315098639280806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3182758325054621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972644407947493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1113265595800148,0.13401519323064784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13381812609983362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1262807116589979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118992772296595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13330226455556524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300969537926748,0.0,0.0,0.11141113867095026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10702952996713214,0.2272462778383393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355233290446528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.092545670390365,0.0,0.09709626425211478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08530819819074582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08727819442762799,0.1099247097044196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13390245594264413,0.0,0.0,0.08065013128755434,0.12943873361817584,0.0,0.4054851585395272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011498262326417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09691840389714282,0.0,0.0,0.17821509928213025,0.0,0.10053812769336756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22007165755643612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363756152847909,0.0,0.1236890060395384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10387471872163208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11359864236977045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13652533741183795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08943061083312732,0.0,0.0,0.08107081547594643
mentalhealth,jmaclees,2020/04/17,F*ck life. This shits dumb af.,-1.875,-3.1238018333333297,-2.619999999999997,119.19000000000004,150.66666666666666,1.2000000000000002,3.0,3.1291,-3.6434,23,0,6,0,2,6,6,6,0.615,0.385,0.0,-0.7506,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5668670396248152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8238092979488627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,valancealot,2020/04/17,"Can someone help me? I've never been diagnosed for anything as I have not had insurance for almost 8 years and don't have the funds. The thing I need help with is, I feel I have major mood swings and/or am bipolar and I can't help myself. The more I read and hear other's stories really reminds me of myself when I step back and look at myself at another person's view. I don't know how to control my mood swings when they happen, it just happens, and then I'll feel guilty about it later when it dawn's upon me that maybe that wasn't the best course of action or words. This is really starting to affect my relationships with people. I'll be cheerful and playful and flirty for a day or two, and then just depressed or salty the next. Then it repeats like a circle, and sometimes that circle goes off course for a bit but it always comes back. What do I do?",5.540965909090911,5.202298437500005,6.024000000000001,83.221,67.4659090909091,8.403636363636364,27.25909090909091,7.554174236665415,1.3976063636363634,679,17,139,6,10,220,105,176,0.038,0.8809999999999999,0.081,0.6028,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,2,9,7,0,0,8,0,16,2,0,3,1,29,26,21,0,1,7,0,2,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,12,12,0,1,3,2,1,3,6,1,0,1,3,5,18,4,16,22,4,22,0,1,2,0,7,4,0,4,16,99,30,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16839986602721962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399324932335657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1763429009122381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.138391144983909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586276217929791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17648603425291418,0.0,0.18360015926796874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14486520137219824,0.0,0.0,0.18861908642173075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.108456963345111,0.0,0.1448462115251211,0.17069093907474897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700655318437925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2974277125328067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18954195428928225,0.0,0.33816624009568474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09242287847102347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216029592138059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14122204129249613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16895127794936105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246973333646671,0.12970453717843886,0.0,0.1788527241110794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11658922102926045,0.14684121687385568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16821741026174436,0.0,0.2154704515689898,0.0,0.0,0.1805536846214616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14249150560357704,0.0,0.16632630979532387,0.0,0.1190329367903296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11172593809187983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16427951051138992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10829719022642237
mentalhealth,rainman747,2020/04/17,Oh no suddenly off my meds I took my last Lexapro this morning and forgot to get my refill. The pharmacy is already closed for the weekend so I can’t get any more until Monday. Any advice? I’m a little nervous about what’ll happen now.,0.9193749999999988,3.407705520833339,3.017500000000002,87.67750000000002,87.54166666666666,4.866666666666667,22.583333333333336,6.42735559955562,0.7759333333333327,187,7,35,2,6,63,41,48,0.091,0.909,0.0,-0.4601,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,8,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,5,0,5,6,1,10,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,6,21,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30849811811748645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3483824976072687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4293732784709683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32988015323542585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27917222476312104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.257337412272177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3164140623782786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506712257699045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3507540112778917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pheober,2020/04/17,"Recovering from social rejection Hi everyone. I had a really rough time earlier this year; my then boyfriend who I was wildly in love with moved across the country on two days notice and broke up with me and right after this, my friend group kicked me out, leaving me with no friends at my college. I had spent all my time with my boyfriend and that friend group so I was feeling super alone. 

Fast forward to now (about 7 months later) and I’m doing much better; getting over the ex, making new friends, etc. But the whole thing with my old friend group was really painful and is still impactful to me; they were my first and only friends at my school and they never told me why they didn’t want to be my friend anymore. They also still all hangout together and when they see me on campus they say hello and make small talk as if everything’s fine. I’m not usually very responsive to this because I’m still kind of upset with them. 

But now I’m noticing it’s affecting my current friendships. For example, two of my really close friends (we have a little group of three) were hanging out last night and they didn’t invite me and it made me really insecure. It made me wonder if they are about to kick me out of the group or something when in reality, they are totally allowed to have their individual friendship. I have this idea in my head that everyone is always just going to leave with no explanation, just like my ex and my friends did. Obviously because of this fear, romantic relationships are pretty much off the table right now.

Do you guys have any advice for this? Any books to recommend? I want to be more secure in my relationships and this has never been a problem for me before. Thanks. Sorry for the long post, shoutout if you made it all the way down to here!",5.050177356656949,6.265480221574348,5.395994897959188,81.83099914965987,68.94169096209913,8.748736637512147,28.577380952380953,9.075114841892004,2.2410681243926143,1408,49,272,26,24,448,183,343,0.078,0.736,0.185,0.9904,2,1,1,0,0,0,33.0,1,2,11,3,15,24,0,3,10,0,25,3,1,7,7,54,45,25,0,6,9,2,2,1,9,0,1,1,0,1,15,25,0,1,3,2,1,4,7,7,0,4,16,4,46,17,47,27,9,54,0,2,1,1,41,22,0,5,29,194,61,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08024116833776095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08504567663670354,0.0,0.06566679628357719,0.06832569669963988,0.0,0.0,0.11168111406243413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08143534593042175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011226110312184,0.0,0.06987324283325,0.0,0.0,0.07262344778711505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052956946676516986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0915791786626246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1569275135322355,0.0737990608266575,0.0,0.0,0.0924014451154568,0.04151947013631374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984640316083875,0.0,0.0,0.5709719163722854,0.0,0.042901345830851284,0.0,0.04666746339922628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08130609205305504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842729877518176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09269707828532643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08550943371787863,0.0,0.06693413478091848,0.0,0.17389442826208934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04011691159184146,0.08230012616822867,0.0,0.07266859391251207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0741113845498736,0.23309568014985815,0.10962389954565373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0655428710463401,0.0872745326057377,0.12072695459690465,0.0,0.1266632597338072,0.07930652707145883,0.0,0.0770587317267901,0.0,0.0,0.1869754072317742,0.08616517129688714,0.0,0.0,0.062451644611713576,0.0873754316205871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864282515126753,0.08353978947342568,0.0,0.07857231954011333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2104181578050497,0.0,0.0,0.1763201099098156,0.0,0.1402503702999309,0.0,0.06530060731445654,0.0,0.08310408108865018,0.06543448589479088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08370521375305019,0.0,0.06321561936685148,0.0,0.09192026438607637,0.0,0.0,0.19672981879266785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06600038424907798,0.0,0.07559983833820917,0.0,0.0,0.0545531090252697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576304686872304,0.0,0.0,0.07846375676611775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16042752830011173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904373283048235,0.06775291808885266,0.0968663131536742,0.06517852932410234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07409540652629547,0.09167771173736136,0.0,0.0,0.08904948303644265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052878933275940655
mentalhealth,man_im_livin,2020/04/17,"Calling people who have benefited from psychiatry! I have finally made the leap of faith in getting an appointment with a psychiatrist. I've realised it is in the best interest for me and those around me. Any of my primary care doctors have never really given me what I needed mentally, so I knew it was time.

What can I expect going into this? I am going for past childhood trauma and major anxiety. What was your experience and do you feel it has helped you in any way?

What questions did you ask, what should I? Any feedback is very appreciated as I am very very nervous about it.",4.3828828828828845,6.326092333333339,6.122702702702704,73.13288288288287,71.61261261261261,9.257657657657658,29.45045045045045,9.725611199111238,3.1128990990990983,463,19,81,12,9,159,76,111,0.06,0.7929999999999999,0.147,0.9091,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,4,0,1,3,7,0,1,4,0,14,1,0,1,1,14,24,5,0,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,12,6,0,0,3,0,0,2,1,2,0,0,6,1,15,5,13,17,2,13,1,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,5,64,27,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3836188499665495,0.0,0.14384929990460904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673945528323584,0.17579105665880487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19733530141675792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19200881577745327,0.0,0.19171826544051654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19246585708670624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18393819775716214,0.0,0.0,0.09507815484964326,0.0,0.0,0.20598750399981827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0982426025373628,0.0,0.21373376379536013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260385601250519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1779270231476898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1894990578681792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13942851608370938,0.14502724845949494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1795044770874106,0.1303625477854162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21064668485926394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.120462581321982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096470375123442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4654555380705341,0.0,0.14925658452777196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cookieboies,2020/04/17,"Arabic info about how to deal with mania Hi, I have a friend who is experiencing manic episodes due to family pressures. Her parents keep asking me what’s wrong with her but there is a huge language barrier. Can someone send me a link or video that is in the Arabic language about how to calm someone down when they are having a lot of panic or mania

Her parents are starting to hate her because of the things she says when she starts being manic. I don’t know if it’s too late to send them something, but it’s very serious",3.8827857142857134,5.352333885714288,4.8125595238095285,83.93598214285716,72.04761904761905,6.773809523809526,26.458333333333336,7.1686216300943375,1.2945476190476186,418,14,80,4,8,136,71,105,0.152,0.7759999999999999,0.07200000000000001,-0.8334,2,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,0,8,7,1,2,6,0,10,0,0,2,0,15,16,9,0,1,5,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,6,2,0,2,3,1,0,2,1,5,0,0,0,2,12,2,13,15,1,11,0,0,0,0,18,3,0,4,6,59,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1967253486963488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12827728640366046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169459699231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19837639517449368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16257910478115928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.207757859799409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870414734203551,0.0,0.0,0.11564782688798353,0.0,0.23737626259096695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789016111646011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24689640472261984,0.4673192739771842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673438321042635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35659640222560424,0.16200069844299064,0.0,0.0,0.2978894554168689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13980155304726036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17362829253082326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300741647765951,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Particular_Reward,2020/04/17,"Back in the hole Rightly or wrongly I came to the nihilistic conclusion that there is no meaning in life 10 or so years ago while in my 20s. The more I thought about it the more it cemented the idea that nothing I do will last or matter or mean anything in the long run.

I'm not sure if it caused me to feel depressed, or being depressed makes me think this way (side question: what do you think?). I managed to control things a bit and after a very low point finished last year positively and with a good outlook for 2020.

All of this covid shit has dragged me back towards my low point. It has confirmed that almost everyone's job can not happen and society will just roll on. It has confirmed that there isn't much to life really other than distracting yourself. It has confirmed to me that whether I lay in bed all day or not doesn't really matter, that all the things that everyone including myself is a facade, and that whether we die today or in 50 years doesn't mean anything.

I don't like that if I voice that my lost outlets mean something to me and has a real affect on my mental health I get shrieked at that people are dying and to put things into perspective. Ok... so my enjoyment in life doesn't matter: thanks for confirming that.

I'm not doing ok. I wasn't doing ok before, and I don't think I'll do ok.

Specifics... I live in a country town, with minimal access to mental health thingos normally let alone now, and my wife can't listen to this stuff any more. I made contact with an online service and have a call scheduled for Monday. I am only doing that for her and hold no hope personally that it'll help.",5.317615384615387,5.626466569230771,5.742576923076926,82.8341730769231,67.92307692307692,8.592307692307692,30.403846153846153,8.395991825355821,2.1141538461538456,1285,46,256,17,20,413,170,325,0.132,0.81,0.057999999999999996,-0.9653,1,1,1,0,0,0,32.0,1,1,0,3,9,18,1,1,15,4,30,6,1,5,4,61,50,24,2,4,16,1,1,1,0,3,5,2,1,1,30,16,0,2,12,0,0,3,14,8,0,0,5,3,28,10,33,40,8,41,0,5,0,0,10,20,1,12,18,178,58,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609810541770517,0.0,0.09725965486976433,0.10059530846737552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06605036589386218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598561247785185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14937086251189338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08264876821960772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10603861241522647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09917854040321916,0.1110885487877577,0.0,0.09977720393754673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893730309893804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06263952028004081,0.0,0.16731239607814258,0.0,0.20160704438188973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18561991926089946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049110831625295406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050745367527095485,0.0,0.0,0.08146635231342818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08588996343075618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20648502927688334,0.0,0.0,0.06510284633083957,0.0,0.0,0.09647001264867393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964568162554293,0.0,0.0,0.096384545947196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1583445555744448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0993199534549277,0.20581312159410198,0.047451831250385684,0.0,0.0857657972773143,0.08595521735627816,0.0,0.0,0.10602667793235124,0.0,0.0,0.09190485542356963,0.06483368953191662,0.0,0.0,0.4232034336509453,0.0,0.0,0.1957643443719223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140025053761039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09516481090444938,0.09319692883016877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07387021542373076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733632078429133,0.08480841707735662,0.0,0.0,0.18363469583427225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976404598864215,0.1088055809340182,0.0,0.0,0.11055292004618356,0.12444535882733343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294677531495064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09970048903726432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07477387424794922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118831430459107,0.0,0.0,0.09154198393030356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942240638760178,0.0,0.0,0.19358256811903535,0.18670708815419265,0.0,0.07710877713180236,0.0,0.0,0.09206598047620212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0801407662828978,0.0,0.07709567989936211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10619421292656424,0.0,0.18764172905727625
mentalhealth,OGesmith1,2020/04/17,Just wanna feel better I’ve been on medication (Zoloft) for harm ocd and anxiety I had suicidal thoughts still at first while taking 25mg. I’ve just upped my does to 50mg after 5 weeks and the unwanted suicidal thoughts are coming back. Should I be worried or will they go away?? P.S. this is day 5 on 50mg,1.2371428571428569,3.5911457301587326,2.9041269841269863,90.27142857142859,83.76190476190476,6.7746031746031745,21.698412698412696,7.957251820313856,1.1134507936507938,243,8,52,5,7,80,50,63,0.272,0.6859999999999999,0.042,-0.9409,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,2,4,2,0,0,1,0,7,2,0,0,0,12,13,4,2,3,3,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,4,1,4,1,9,6,0,14,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,1,7,31,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840990683661443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22610163891260085,0.18504748537712026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21283823252498366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20730145563518584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15520142975846773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21059727029937128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168150794893436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2046995212972785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13676878100626266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24243281927110394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921859867239768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.526471165521901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18094128530414172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3821035794744426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930375115367402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443950447658983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,olli88di,2020/04/17,Being isolated I think at one point this was my dream being isolated but after a few weeks it's driving me insane. I really need help but it's never been further away from me. I don't know what to do. Every day I'm moving further to thinking about just ending it.,0.396571428571427,2.776975981818186,3.136103896103897,86.57272727272729,89.18181818181819,5.324675324675325,18.766233766233768,6.868970318607317,0.5308961038961031,209,6,40,3,7,73,42,55,0.126,0.773,0.10099999999999999,-0.0983,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,6,0,0,0,1,8,11,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,1,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,0,6,0,7,7,1,12,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,0,5,31,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29909436954304064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20530533970932835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819580138506567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26821828309571744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2133790604117397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17495336284705953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3383489549358645,0.0,0.2360478073299696,0.24552627370293206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21571791849477706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3009376783388888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2039391150752145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4079635560028384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2553561004197615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Iron_Thread,2020/04/17,"I just found out that I’m not going back to school I know that it’s better to stay home, and not be around people. I know that my problems, which aren’t actual problems are minuscule to everything else that’s happening, but I’m not doing well. I’m an introvert, but I miss everything. I miss my friends and going places. I didn’t have any big plans, but I just miss being around people. So far, quarantine has been effecting me very negatively. I just spiral every single day and get way too deep in my thoughts. I don’t take care of myself and even though I’m with my family, I feel really lonely and I don’t want to talk to them. Every single day is the same thing: I do my school work, and then I stay in bed all day because I don’t have the energy or care to do anything. I don’t care about my health or anything anymore. All I wanted was to go back to school and finish the year, and now I can’t. Everything is going downhill. I just need advice, I can’t stop spiraling, I don’t take care of myself, and I’m extremely lonely.",2.945773255813954,4.039956120930235,4.633880813953488,85.77361191860467,73.83720930232558,8.165697674418603,22.73982558139535,8.660442795831766,1.297052325581396,806,20,173,15,16,273,107,215,0.10300000000000001,0.767,0.13,0.8625,1,6,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,4,15,14,0,0,4,0,22,1,0,1,2,40,50,17,0,5,12,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,7,13,0,1,6,0,0,4,13,7,1,0,5,1,30,7,17,43,5,26,0,5,0,0,3,9,0,2,10,116,37,4,0.0,0.0,0.1038040174194296,0.0,0.0,0.10394577745735596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07233680957671419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549273546984124,0.0,0.0,0.17507067373944266,0.1893877930159488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16358746074465666,0.0,0.06484356489909625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09407765238523963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43381458426533104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2058039946858993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886040469346941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025789890398401,0.0,0.17924649593314645,0.0,0.2868016846773522,0.0,0.10027833465752968,0.0,0.05378502945981696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11663173315100188,0.08218297274343686,0.0,0.05557513479344695,0.0,0.24181531079290056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09406467087896793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306877744815155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1067000868919146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11691886503823673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07887371033819562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749031434578191,0.0,0.11113641010688012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20356784454698484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06814481723435242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3229633303297913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267574304946953,0.0,0.08893200327311332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15995745819758536,0.08549802296468001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07066902748073561,0.0,0.10451024165615656,0.08444772186485051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877682851788205,0.12548227348589142,0.084433378083462,0.0,0.0,0.09564146974310617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07744029905600691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850027167284735
mentalhealth,KaitysGraceline,2020/04/17,"So totally confused Okay. So I’m very very confused right now. Lately I’ve been having even more trouble focusing and carrying conversations. I’ll be good for a little bit, and then I just zone out completely. It’s like everything goes blurry and dull? Like I’m seeing everything through a very crappy video screen. I can see myself doing stuff, but it’s almost like I have zero control over it. I gone to multiple doctors to see if it was something serious. So I’ve had so many tests done. However my doctor has decided that it’s nothing serious, and they can do nothing for me. They told me to try to ignore it the best I can. The problem is I can’t. I want to ignore it but it’s like there’s something in my head telling me that I need to know. Anyway, I’ve been wanting to maybe go see a physiologist? Problem is I’m 17 and my parents are not very supportive of my decision. I also did not want to google whats going on because Frankly I do not want to rely on web.m.d. So I figured I’d go on here see if anyone else has any ideas on what I should do. Any advice on how not to go completely ape until I turn 18.",0.8361505305039785,3.110230685344831,3.301206896551726,87.28755968169762,84.81896551724137,6.3278514588859425,24.00928381962865,7.61054688173877,1.3710332891246684,877,35,180,16,26,303,130,232,0.132,0.762,0.106,-0.6232,2,0,2,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,2,2,13,18,0,2,5,1,23,3,1,2,1,36,45,18,0,10,9,1,0,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,13,6,0,3,5,1,0,5,5,10,0,1,8,6,23,8,23,35,4,19,0,1,6,0,6,10,0,5,8,118,36,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10242373526501564,0.0,0.0,0.1049568056840234,0.0,0.0,0.0838202969570383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14255521321278852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0732888921219038,0.10739507122380493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06389408292789571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10999658633952206,0.0,0.11443053189085785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197924879729614,0.0,0.1175586256028476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21456462289772715,0.0,0.10726185360160667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755925241503862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06922913670610717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18840143097366255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2382744925433889,0.08791361763514542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757014592747548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11832306536430022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05760343119794036,0.0,0.11823557414033666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2048287191052364,0.1050518893175834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062656788687549,0.1053004783681495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771878978309743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20114510919607756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163843470750648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20058707076296656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08951120164373576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4176188233127037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1613829907209216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11998778233819332,0.0,0.11894250674519526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09161268871869853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015496056940484,0.0,0.07116231741311711,0.1140083214644794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3459324977200886,0.24728975961036895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,batseer,2020/04/17,"I feel empty and broken. Why? I dont know. But recently I cant do anything. I cant sleep, I cant concentrate. I have this constant and overwhelming feeling of nothingness. I constantly fuckup and disappoint my family and I hate it. I dont know what to do anymore, in life. Suggestions would be really helpful.",0.7240000000000002,3.1793767333333385,3.6633333333333336,79.48500000000001,98.33333333333334,8.4,26.0,8.548686976883017,3.2812,244,12,43,9,10,86,39,60,0.20199999999999999,0.716,0.08199999999999999,-0.7722,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,1,0,0,10,2,1,0,0,10,15,5,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,4,0,0,0,6,3,0,0,0,2,10,0,3,13,0,4,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,3,32,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21864160528145568,0.0,0.0,0.18142355003696314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4764877409146352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5167656503395471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20783436856409268,0.0,0.22294701391199906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176631124265396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477727489668133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423231156704065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572064031755645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14123524397554085,0.0,0.2176821583028853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22062377924587964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19893497647486924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15661169967428828,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hidden_unlikable_me,2020/04/17,"Is it possible that my subconscious is stopping me from falling in love with girls? I know I am bisexual. I had crushes on girls and boys and I am okay with it now, so it's not about internalized homophobia. I don't want to get to much into details but two years ago I was in a very low place in my life. let's just say I'm very glad I got to get out of that religious school for girls. 

I had the biggest crush on a girl back then. I was just realizing I am into girls and she was beautiful and hilarious and she tried to make me laugh even though I couldn't bring myself to say anything. Some things happened with her. She wasn't the one that made everything horrible but I was in a very bad state and my mental health was very unstable and the things she did were the cherry on top the most suicidal year of my life. She broke me. 

I never really forgave her but I understand why she did those things, now when I'm in a better place. I am not mad at her anymore. but I didn't have a real crush on a girl since her. I used to get tons of crushes on boys and girls, but now I just get crushes on boys. I started thinking. what if what happened back then made my brain go ""NOPE"" and something in me stops me from falling in love with girls? I am working with a therapist and I notice a lot of problems I didn't realize stayed with me. I am just wondering. did I just stop being bisexual?  I don't think it's possible. I think I'm subconsciously repressing those feelings. but what do you think? and if you agree do you think it's permanent? because I really miss having a crush on a girl.",1.590762463343104,3.5137704242424266,3.4367644183773223,89.38288856304985,79.60606060606061,7.167155425219942,23.37243401759531,8.155646560271837,1.2378709677419355,1240,42,275,24,31,416,145,330,0.187,0.698,0.115,-0.9655,0,0,1,0,0,0,29.0,0,3,0,3,15,13,1,1,15,1,31,6,1,4,1,62,61,24,1,5,15,0,1,0,0,0,3,2,0,12,16,20,0,4,11,0,0,4,10,7,0,2,17,3,52,6,38,41,5,45,0,3,0,2,29,23,0,6,16,198,68,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09013162361868897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008374909487318,0.0,0.0,0.0836725268330744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15636857854426586,0.0848970821409938,0.0619821105166566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08992613926090291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11350654130724035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06715751765516391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09138184461684698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05141157253318239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124907322480369,0.0,0.0577860861810596,0.0,0.08132137590460177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17982746122011498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080792129593766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05587970082736034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397288789567713,0.14363669383362454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08644320242259046,0.18353716026775296,0.19242081570969816,0.06787101382024112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10246774954737327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07474520463039849,0.0,0.07842052588477598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1157613485824596,0.0,0.0,0.0688998059392926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2124642364863294,0.0,0.0,0.22925387320555615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09729234240886593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573209574366053,0.13027536655424896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617172328252698,0.0,0.10290380582086923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410928969658395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07827687563542407,0.0,0.0,0.07196838062700142,0.1083754736438864,0.0,0.2550226809978457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11121948999932378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11805627188203476,0.20265151113599456,0.3257565485870829,0.09989835319101444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903284968498234,0.0,0.0993248647013278,0.10585063227430944,0.0,0.08781735202864799,0.0,0.33558078185716195,0.05997245952768592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174879531207054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11026571247512876,0.07402296869398768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095490403263135
mentalhealth,justhelpmeoutman,2020/04/17,"paranoid Ive been thinking and really afraid after being shown cartel and torture gore vids, what doesn’t scare me is the kills and gore but ive been thinking what happens if i reincarnated and die like this over and over? Like actually feeling these horrible things in different lives if reincarnation is true. When most people have this type of scary thought it goes away in a short time, but this has been on my mind for a while. Someone please say something to help",6.241969696969697,7.57214713636364,5.550454545454548,81.39151515151516,66.27272727272728,8.593939393939394,30.57575757575757,8.841846274778883,2.3588575757575763,380,14,70,6,6,115,67,88,0.20600000000000002,0.626,0.16699999999999998,-0.6428,1,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,7,2,2,3,0,11,0,0,0,1,16,16,11,2,2,4,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,8,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,2,5,3,10,11,1,11,0,0,0,0,2,7,0,3,6,47,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.2328497034071692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241826844626748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24764032013850265,0.24929748168186802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206487809316721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21100272667443956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993577760862304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2639874773747238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.233146350972631,0.0,0.21069769223397164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2409288697331773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16542267247749734,0.0,0.0,0.2619229853815025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15286017705500385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18975287114024067,0.23889101896879286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20217414143602774,0.18369423760494014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15852240113668614,0.3057843091041335,0.0,0.1894303079830608,0.13913586595736593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unknown24B8,2020/04/17,"I think I just had a panic attack for no reason, can someone help/give advice. So I woke up this morning feeling really foggy and I couldn’t keep a thought in my head for long. I’d go to search something and forget what I wanted to search. As well I was getting a little bit of vertigo. 
So I decided to take a shower to try and wake myself up, this normally helps. In the middle of the shower my issues got worse. I couldn’t focus at all, then I felt the muscles in my stomach start to tighten and all the sudden I was crying. The tears just came out and I started hyperventilating slightly, I couldn’t stop it for some reason it just took hold of my body. 
I kept myself calm and tried to slow my breathing which helped me kept everything at a steady pace and it ended after about 10 mins. I don’t know why this happened. I’m the happiest I’ve ever been in my life right now, I’m very thankful that I don’t have much to worry about at all during this pandemic and I have no stresses other than school. 

Does anyone know what this is or why it happens, because it did happen to me once 8 years ago in high school but my mental health was not as sturdy then. I would greatly appreciate any tips or guidance.",3.911952845915696,4.7300259109311735,5.1250535841867135,84.19695879971422,71.2672064777328,7.269254584424863,25.46058585377471,7.285733465282438,1.1352893069778518,948,27,192,9,17,315,148,247,0.086,0.848,0.066,-0.1217,2,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,0,0,10,7,1,2,11,0,16,8,5,2,4,43,41,17,0,6,7,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,2,0,15,10,0,5,9,0,0,3,8,3,1,0,14,2,28,4,31,23,6,33,0,0,0,0,2,15,0,3,15,130,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11739242729866585,0.10649052007928643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08169445519550457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08399967954653408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13666845590928908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07323186823366998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13115395431525068,0.13344051052282302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13739997271564594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196029094850667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051290635905938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640204473922033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10866703745392137,0.0,0.0,0.10796765628256996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06074277681177074,0.0,0.11534637204913398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06276445403017747,0.0,0.06827426516581163,0.0,0.09608121174296183,0.13244688744486705,0.0,0.0,0.31869923841963793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12329095890346127,0.12769559823415258,0.0,0.0,0.24156754428375515,0.12692694814760347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1253874803211706,0.0,0.10677959379845496,0.0,0.0,0.1320437414542847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08485338227969222,0.0,0.12040467228999975,0.0,0.10631378885040904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12106565379114342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08831146488826115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11770468301591427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279375608804785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1409500113770555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07696017768731858,0.24703314873372195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10259279457236913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431617086221011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1017881710492788,0.09248413444612018,0.0,0.0,0.1700612942391129,0.0,0.0,0.1004364389216934,0.13761176985446658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903249499001682,0.0,0.0,0.11060218476072048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07697627732754776,0.0,0.0953720612039721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13347201279514506,0.16312463418188455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0991221797461684,0.07085746543916663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801385643742274,0.0,0.2168024171131092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12200073707459085,0.12242563388663805,0.08533892742050643,0.0,0.0,0.07736161447820815
mentalhealth,Broad-Worry,2020/04/17,"I need some help. Hi 
I don't know if this is the right place for this but anyway, I will appreciate any helps. 
I have exam anxiety, yes I know the doctor said it is treatable but I don't believe them anymore, I have it for more than four years. It's become worse every single day.
My problem is that last semester in the final exam period, I get the worst anxiety attack in my life, then I go into a depression period, that because I did very bad in the exam that I studied very well for and I totally understand the material but yes I get the anxiety attack and then I can't just concentrate and solve the exam. now I am in my last semester and with the quarantine and since we didn't take midterms exams before the quarantine, my university decided to make a final exam from at least 70 or 80.
I am freaking out because I don't know what will happen, I did one exam before quarantine and I get anxiety attack even before the exam start, and I did very bad in the exam even though the exam was very easy, I hardly pass it. 
I just want to end this semester with the least losses, I have a very good GPA and I really don't want to destroy what I work for for years, especially that I need to deal with my anxiety and my exam at the same time.
I just want some advice or any thing that can help.
I will appreciate any help.",3.707335404932998,4.602765431734318,5.734993202563603,79.34977665566133,71.80442804428043,9.247698582248981,25.702272285880753,9.549672527348893,2.185224354243542,1036,31,209,24,19,362,120,271,0.179,0.653,0.16699999999999998,-0.8293,0,3,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,1,2,9,13,4,0,18,2,22,2,0,1,1,40,40,18,0,7,9,0,1,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,15,15,0,0,5,0,0,2,6,11,1,2,6,2,36,2,23,31,9,28,0,2,0,0,9,11,0,5,15,151,51,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274147055979168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1936188922681441,0.0,0.363015817699092,0.0,0.094121682093935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239093152384516,0.0,0.0,0.15848581912931464,0.1157081646255156,0.10481670181019152,0.242275159773098,0.10692705317626636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06120679961268001,0.09784436787862974,0.0817427740002605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09714075846850696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405893230726462,0.0,0.0,0.12536961139128108,0.0,0.07996276535787898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20793072263786005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487540866030101,0.0,0.053937514527723635,0.07960301545943993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08392544765579553,0.0,0.08501752486303894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544551332304171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564742851282682,0.15472282417673716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06703522225134416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06335078279000105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1407438390322733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431105702787691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09915702550088304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09081264157035952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060799492927308324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104957752746167,0.09027775370536484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850758434671387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06717526366888575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07135782839440709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06305161875654378,0.0,0.093245091208515,0.0,0.05534070587374657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988009466184548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3915387442907116,0.167934824149665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08533228349861928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06909301551946671,0.0,0.09671776606147844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12223326592157847
mentalhealth,uselessthrowaway9021,2020/04/17,"How to get through this quarantine? I (M19) don’t know how long this is supposed to go on for, I live in Ohio but DeWine (our governor) says he wants to open up on May 1st. I take online classes for college which are really difficult. I don’t have a job anymore. I can’t really go out to get food cause my parents are on the higher risk for COVID-19. I just don’t want to live in a world like this. It sucks and I don’t want to do this for however many more months or years it could be. How is everyone else pushing themselves through this?",1.7261946902654868,3.4351660884955777,3.0187699115044246,93.54603097345137,78.38053097345133,6.99787610619469,24.574336283185843,7.908726449838941,1.1277228318584065,420,15,97,7,10,136,72,113,0.091,0.852,0.055999999999999994,-0.7003,3,1,1,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,0,0,5,4,1,1,3,0,14,1,0,4,0,16,24,6,0,4,3,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,8,3,1,0,1,0,0,3,5,3,0,0,0,1,9,1,19,21,1,15,0,0,0,0,4,9,1,2,4,61,17,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20749641438610653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2149331949241619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670502928458891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17478184893655027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19992483610425696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25299744995202245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2186243658827392,0.0,0.2378164226651101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20762496426250207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498538340804924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1022174734624895,0.0,0.3695015714324775,0.1851588214312902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121227776493515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16700255368604042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323212088727156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.268071638718043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166385268217092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15731224942879204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.370221537550084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347349719702116
mentalhealth,TheWanMan_,2020/04/17,"Raising Awareness I've started a petition to help raise awareness for people suffering with mental health issues throughout this lockdown period.

In the petition I've also mentioned the creation of a platform on Twitter and Instagram for people that may need to open up and have a chat about their problems.

I would greatly appreciate if you could share or even just sign the petition below and follow the account @lockdownpal on Twitter and Instagram to help me spread the word.

Stay Safe Stay Home Stay Strong ❣️

https://www.change.org/p/raise-awareness-raise-awareness-for-mental-health-impacts-of-coronavirus?recruiter=1076878598&utm_source=share_petition&utm_medium=copylink&utm_campaign=share_petition",17.29229813664596,22.084364130434786,10.05745341614907,46.364565217391316,43.56521739130434,9.604968944099381,38.14285714285714,9.957137785484203,4.500094409937889,628,23,61,10,7,160,67,92,0.057999999999999996,0.755,0.188,0.902,0,2,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,1,1,1,4,6,0,0,8,0,4,1,0,0,0,17,7,7,0,5,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,2,6,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,4,13,4,0,13,0,1,0,0,7,7,0,3,2,40,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255256578345011,0.0,0.5102178039207995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12532458289812942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10367456620683106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17305557512854242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33369504742787337,0.0,0.0,0.2104220094806766,0.0,0.1574497016750831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16383172862353226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31636962935592616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638830411952425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.217640928607972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15019526847728948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110134654506187,0.5019146303999442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11150414668488327,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,illogistiX,2020/04/17,"Wondering if anyone else deals with severe pharmacophobia I'll try to keep this brief. I suffer from pretty severe pharmacophobia where I have panic attacks every time I have to orally take medicine or supplements. I was wondering if anyone else had this fear and what I can do to help move past it. I realize it's irrational and stems from one bad interaction with a medicine, but I can't help the physiological aspect.

Any ideas or thoughts on how to cope?",7.627764705882353,8.122588011764709,7.976470588235292,68.15411764705885,63.0,11.03529411764706,32.294117647058826,10.793553405168565,3.4992823529411763,371,13,65,9,5,122,60,85,0.188,0.726,0.086,-0.698,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,1,2,2,0,7,0,0,1,0,16,12,8,0,2,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,5,0,0,2,1,5,0,1,3,0,7,0,9,9,0,6,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,6,2,40,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491686123121173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2363190866458337,0.3462940209228334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19224695170347356,0.0,0.0,0.1410969715091812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17421803493523155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2823336792115289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423787199066708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901572013323618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22653666353885302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19076559848603386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15020328776900188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17960629129945174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11450987136942235,0.0,0.0,0.19826967276043614,0.0,0.0,0.16131708141271395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17192039092366956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3818141086039702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12705708984230984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13415669272147354,0.09853759841560107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11473098697341785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3665180875287191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OutlawTheEighth,2020/04/17,"Feeling disconnected from reality sometimes I understand that this may be dissociation? In mainly stressful situations this happens, it's not often  such as every week or 3 weeks. It's hard to describe how I feel and what I think. It's like I question reality? Is this real? Why is reality like this? I feel quite numb and..well I don't know how to describe it. It's quick and doesn't last long. Seconds, few minutes max. Does anyone know why I do this? This this just how my mind deals with extremely stressful situations?",2.169207459207456,5.0212503030303015,4.066868686868688,79.46902097902098,86.37373737373737,6.682517482517482,26.80730380730381,7.882392219407189,2.1693024087024084,416,19,75,9,13,140,62,99,0.122,0.809,0.068,-0.7313,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,1,7,5,0,2,0,0,7,1,0,3,0,21,15,7,0,0,3,0,4,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,14,3,0,0,8,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,4,8,2,6,13,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,4,7,49,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021626876148064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17725053365883142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15045561877707278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448570126192782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2607963514364537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203563278163013,0.0,0.15401399159754744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1889746008155423,0.14014451597534444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16799097129935767,0.0,0.0,0.15215114012919373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1735985773385923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19259904983907256,0.18286691600868335,0.0,0.19569205159376912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38650923786732205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700414903683614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39388658620782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11016471602537883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17898342943808573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2758210322874568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3102771080140813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwawayculll,2020/04/17,"Therapist vs. psychologist; what kind of therapy to seek? Thanks for taking the time to read!

I'm finally in a place in my life where I'm acknowledging that I need help. But I have no idea where to start. I feel like it's so important to find a good therapist/psychologist and I don't know what to look for or what I need. I know certain doctors have different areas of expertise. I'll start with some background so it may be easier to give advice.

I'm in the US in Maryland. I'm dealing with grief that occurred 9 years ago for which I harbor a lot of guilt (father committed suicide). I think many of my other issues may stem from this too.

About 2 years ago I was in the realm of self-harm from this due to not processing his death. I feel like this is no longer a concern. I feel as though I've made a lot of progress since then.

I suffer from anxiety that has been worsening lately. I'm also finding myself withdrawing from others even though I think I've improved so much.

I don't THINK I will need meds. I think I just need to work through these lingering thoughts and feelings, but then again I'm not so sure. Should I seek a therapist or a psychologist? Also, is a Master Level Clinician the same as a therapist? Is there a way I can know which doctors in my area have expertise with my issues? I can't find any reviews for these kinds of doctors in my area.


Tl;dr I suffer from prolonged grief, anxiety, withdrawing from people, and have a history of self harm. How can I know what kind of professional help I need?",3.2474754098360634,4.9656837147541,4.488655737704917,84.61068852459017,74.14754098360655,8.289836065573772,26.29836065573771,8.954980946260402,2.0161842622950825,1203,43,245,26,25,396,149,305,0.114,0.7979999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.9079999999999999,1,0,0,0,0,1,35.0,1,0,0,3,17,15,0,1,15,0,20,4,0,2,3,49,51,20,4,6,8,1,4,2,0,4,4,0,0,1,18,6,0,0,18,1,0,0,7,6,0,0,4,5,31,9,41,42,5,28,0,4,1,0,8,14,0,7,15,159,49,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08398032291931856,0.15236260923972375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13745360071923907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058442668627861724,0.0,0.13148890312467226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08860115718120208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08978981000645855,0.0,0.2638920500905761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05676306610925125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17381693620459204,0.12279220230330527,0.0,0.09414390955078022,0.23564491240381766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0824422147610395,0.0,0.07208303796870794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520856919877945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0970166652523132,0.0,0.1793996653740081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26848225188027824,0.18892319209983435,0.0,0.09694492854770996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060702505337206926,0.0839726354887372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07216859958597201,0.0,0.0,0.14612753374846024,0.0,0.08131923174267146,0.0,0.08713044885101792,0.0,0.0,0.09546081823246162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317635225248062,0.3186199490770037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059580506920120326,0.0,0.08978981000645855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0859640238411854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17930992603411627,0.0,0.0,0.07109109059039574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12165863450410368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094005250400785,0.0,0.08099815587657368,0.0,0.06461676136049711,0.0,0.0,0.07912271179261153,0.09828075693275896,0.3991354177121764,0.0,0.2202694935559255,0.1688727345612621,0.06822736936014967,0.05011275238367005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1033761611525136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06821578067013882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06256590196133867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11068607260178166
mentalhealth,KommunistAllosaurus,2020/04/17,"I'd love to receive some advice So, quick introduction. I am a 20 yo male, fit, and pretty good looking.
I always battled with myself because of my homosexuality and constant perfectionism, since I was incredibly small. I was considered very mature when compared to the others of my age, capable of the most profound thoughts, even though I wasn't happy. Growing up I faced horrible challenges. Last year was spent being an anorexic, and right now I am struggling with bulimia and addictions, apparently winning. 
I want to ask you, where do you find strength? I always lacked strength and willpower, at least regarding the things that could help me grow instead of destroying me (it takes willpower to fast for days or eat 100 calories for one week,and I am perfectly capable of doing that for months, but God forbid if I put some serious effort into doing things that would help).
How do you motivate yourselves? Where do you find hope? 
Thank you for your time!",6.794748062015504,8.423370761627911,6.670930232558137,72.76457364341087,65.22093023255815,9.454263565891472,35.26356589147287,9.725611199111238,3.6597310077519385,769,36,125,16,12,243,118,172,0.083,0.69,0.22699999999999998,0.9723,3,0,0,0,0,0,25.0,0,6,0,7,10,15,2,1,5,0,15,4,1,2,1,26,24,12,0,6,3,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,7,8,1,1,4,0,1,4,1,5,0,1,6,1,22,10,18,15,5,23,0,0,1,1,12,8,0,6,11,91,29,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18873645983687384,0.0,0.1691799195457463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881148445370377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16185249731403575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10553799645386314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18709123626077934,0.0,0.13822963494843302,0.0,0.0,0.11165405693507777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17715446563369894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435025043615213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31647403372607225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452126181495509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18429932792113415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.232089801402114,0.0,0.0,0.1719564300085296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411234628268862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538498361590954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15625592616989736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381901320746205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731687440586296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17613470933637593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740427356178115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14785145116361306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14321432174126372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18099230406682915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13017166531710084,0.0,0.0,0.1593941717534885,0.0,0.0,0.23003878899211416,0.0,0.17009862937769415,0.1374453021603325,0.10095306997843104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428497798413472,0.10211612944772927,0.0,0.1388738579101458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229860665406451,0.0,0.0,0.11148957402553887
mentalhealth,luscious19,2020/04/17,"Covid-19 communication advice Now that we are all at home with our significant others I think we can all agree that some new challenges have come up that we may or may not have seen coming. These could be discovering that all of a sudden this person that you love has a bad habit or talking to much, or that they may have decided that they don't like something about you. All of these situations will need to be addressed at some point if they haven't been already. Listening to someone else try to tell you something you disagree with or don't care about can be one of the most annoying, and brain numbing experiences ever, but we still need to learn how to listen to others. When I say that we need to listen its important to under stand the difference between listening and hearing. when  some one hears something all they are experiencing is the sound hitting their ear drums but they aren't actively trying to understand it, when it comes to listening thought there are still two different types. The two types of listening can be broken down to mindless or mindful listening. the first and probably most obvious would be mindless listening, which is essentially when you hear it and nod your head indicating ""aah yes of course"" when in reality your thinking about what your going to have for lunch. An example of this would be in charlie brown when they hear the teacher talking ""waam waamp wa wa"" this is exactly what mindless listening is. Mindless listening can also be lust listening to interesting parts, or only what you want to hear like if you are in an argument for example. What we should be aiming for though is MINDFUL listening where we hear their comments and interpret the and reply with a genuine comment or opinion. although there are many types of mindless listening I will be focusing on mindful listening so I can keep this as quick and sweet as possible. When we use our mindful listening we will then respond in one of a few ways the first would be that we may respond by is judging. This one can be used in a way that makes the other person feel like they have been listened to and been offered some thoughtful advice, but if done incorrectly can leave the speaker feeling put down or ignored. the proper way to respond with a judgment is to supply a positive one such as saying "" oh man that was a silly thing of me to do now that i hear it"" or ""yeah that seems like a good idea now that I think about it"". the WRONG way would be to say ""well that seems like a stupid thing to say"" although comments like this do have a place you need to be very careful not to misuse them. Prompting is the second way that you can reply, and this can be as simple as just asking what they meant by saying ""it was annoying"" and what about it was annoying. this technique will often lead the speaker to open up more about a topic, and makes them think about it them selves as well. when doing this though you need to be careful not to use any comment that can entrap, blame, or questions with only one reasonable answer. over all prompting and questioning can be a good way to talk with someone who needs advice, but you aren't quite sure what to tell them. Some times though we know exactly what to tell someone to help them out, and this can be a great situation to have knowing you can help, but you just aren't sure how to say it. when telling them its important to be sure the speaker wants advice, or if its even needed, because some people just aren't looking for answers. for the sake of this post I will combine the responses of analyzing and para phrasing into one section. when telling the speaker what you have heard and how you've interpreted be sure not to trivialize their situation, because not only will this make them frustrated it will also make them not want to talk to you. Also if you are going to give what you saw in a shortened version or how you considered it be sure that you aren't simplifying problems into black and white, because this can cause some confusion on why you believe some parts over others. the last way of replying to these and perhaps the most reassuring way is supporting them. this can be done through offering support, agreeing with them, praise, reassurance, and empathizing with them. this is usually the safest and sure fire way to help some one when they are stressed out so that they can become relaxed enough to talk about it logically. Keep in mind as we go about speaking with others that no conversation is the same and there is no flow chart that will always provide the right answer, so it relies on us to use our better judgment in the end of this all.",10.332084277158902,7.899632035591277,9.23834238371552,70.75650634561083,59.298507462686565,12.44721506811059,40.53250380116052,10.758950730005283,4.193171260123498,3697,148,676,66,37,1155,321,871,0.11699999999999999,0.77,0.114,-0.306,1,0,3,0,0,0,65.0,16,23,24,7,52,44,5,2,41,2,102,7,3,15,17,182,178,76,0,22,31,0,3,6,0,17,1,37,2,3,75,49,1,3,26,2,0,9,16,12,3,13,14,48,71,32,112,124,28,77,1,0,6,2,129,30,0,40,33,537,146,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171906382695743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048532852747716015,0.10551199882344904,0.036594754314145946,0.0,0.0,0.029907802833033008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04111521836964355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036721333658289404,0.08042911618612922,0.048572283643786636,0.0,0.04955022497728388,0.0,0.038896599048212695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04909605219198633,0.0,0.0,0.1345211496908306,0.045179415771756916,0.0,0.1136542270572489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035114327677216985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09189915509123148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001330212270961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0367395172497532,0.0,0.03895308889050855,0.04544293659039097,0.0,0.029048272935718912,0.03978228782900962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04302072762428902,0.0,0.0,0.04447506230550971,0.031419210160522765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07481846762965105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04218947495180364,0.07498427853871055,0.0737764149991734,0.0,0.0484879345369326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04513600930633541,0.0,0.3469793728682665,0.0,0.08843628943982575,0.0,0.0441153705797129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0496478919256824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07818261423674387,0.0,0.0,0.04834034544082552,0.03584944370644893,0.0,0.04656830582221914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12891798498588802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03693199331634164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0396935273328594,0.0,0.11742755257855887,0.04458866006929044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22203553176901933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03233024656879982,0.22827348536874256,0.0,0.04247600849862241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23841505023093945,0.1003459621257866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525177297890612,0.0,0.030490087045915812,0.07680300880110379,0.04594957754561574,0.0,0.04157516920603284,0.04958066730995105,0.04212053449864261,0.0,0.04741771157202203,0.04208277219774288,0.0,0.04421189168735745,0.0985349836498219,0.04677797889985618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04521860564386277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03755854745364795,0.0,0.20984722849518966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800751985085151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1483055658851261,0.0,0.0,0.11179194021888963,0.10157350036470347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024472229076764,0.0,0.05037876402337005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981561417587988,0.2487029014251027,0.0,0.0,0.17674666801070224,0.19220161574259886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058436509784263485,0.11272203576723774,0.1296299236768306,0.06983016890050361,0.025645001381694173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05971885588375773,0.0,0.08592383637412992,0.045784569830450386,0.0529023386161951,0.15193786186789632,0.048437586003571884,0.036287978188169534,0.07782135643838628,0.31418238585877584,0.0,0.0,0.07908632510823663,0.0,0.03968496961774619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496808059577913,0.04808505659636241,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Red_Beard_of_Tucson,2020/04/17,"Cool video that I found that teaches you how to make a card deck for managing mental health I just wanted to share a video that I found about making a card deck that helps you manage different aspects of mental health.  It's free too!  We are all under a lot of stress with the coronavirus and it seems like a good way to deal with quarantine as well.

​

 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOThC0NId8o&t=1s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SOThC0NId8o&t=1s)",11.54416666666667,14.320375083333333,6.251000000000001,75.89399999999998,55.111111111111114,8.537777777777778,25.511111111111113,8.841846274778883,1.6833744444444452,394,8,58,5,5,99,51,72,0.037000000000000005,0.72,0.243,0.9294,1,1,0,0,0,0,33.0,1,2,0,0,5,7,0,1,6,1,1,2,0,3,1,14,7,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,6,4,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,6,7,11,5,2,2,0,0,0,0,6,1,0,2,1,37,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5351922830867465,0.20006689876208333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1697461794818521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17202345533508898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3610588774472809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13810000557452598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3500289737348839,0.0,0.0,0.11036094271922506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043932217546428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13997893120164104,0.0,0.0,0.21980934782319825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33185549961833355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14989052206631498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18860519564533146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711441213364036,0.1306909358468826,0.0,0.0,0.1480394776357542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20006689876208333,0.0
mentalhealth,kf2k20,2020/04/17,"Helping a friend who doesn’t want to be helped I have a longtime friend whose mental health has been deteriorating for years and I’m nervous that it’s getting to a point he won’t be able to recover from due to the current conditions of the world. He knows he can talk to me and he does, but the root cause of his issues is something that nobody can fix and it’s an ongoing cause that destroys his self esteem and self worth. I’ve tried getting him to speak to someone professionally and he agrees he needs to but then always comes up with an excuse as to why he can’t at the moment. He’s heavily abusing drugs and alcohol, and refuses to change any of his lifestyle habits, I’m getting tired of trying to be there for them but then they’re not doing anything to improve their situation

Edit: when I say “I’m getting tired of trying to be there for them” I realize this sounds very selfish but this has been going on for years, and I’m under a lot of stress at work as it is and I don’t have the energy to keep playing the understanding friend who can always be there and I’m just trying to keep myself from snapping at him and making it worse. I feel guilty about it but can’t keep up with this anymore and I feel like I’m enabling him in the sense that he uses me as an alternative to getting real professional help",8.171555555555559,5.793847451851858,8.350185185185186,75.27083333333334,63.37037037037037,11.074074074074074,35.092592592592595,9.2995712137729,2.907592592592592,1052,34,216,14,12,347,136,270,0.11900000000000001,0.768,0.113,-0.8196,1,0,3,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,3,2,6,9,1,2,14,0,22,5,0,5,0,40,46,23,0,2,7,0,2,1,3,1,5,3,0,2,15,15,1,4,5,1,1,2,6,4,0,0,2,5,18,5,42,38,1,20,0,0,0,0,34,10,0,1,9,137,33,4,0.11279642310573305,0.13364531677269229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12054507271729176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18771131991405732,0.0,0.0,0.0767054356660603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11186374241785006,0.0,0.0,0.09282184533790602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2317459954686512,0.1193236593739013,0.09716413082772214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870890998150868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080804030839546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406652135112172,0.0805817872045267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26143871006359204,0.0,0.29465737786033364,0.0,0.06410480664557862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11989732316285602,0.0,0.0,0.2268151942836554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11773016029163999,0.0,0.3007759306168729,0.0,0.0,0.0619899642576041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05510663476205578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589548528623268,0.0,0.0,0.07529248830165662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136722644887298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08363711849461353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1066290788608732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283870237740145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08970024297059814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353425385701653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12678790555571062,0.0,0.0,0.09557204325925946,0.08683619724143174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12920792156828445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066149223981998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2592857906717766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30632546854848725,0.0,0.0,0.1174250544325829,0.0,0.09741989367967202,0.0,0.0930688620592915,0.06653025280231221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178122749162463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211713941988913,0.0,0.11494919161276093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1452743966081872
mentalhealth,quietwaffle,2020/04/17,"I need to move away from all my family and friends so I can finally end things. This is a desperate call for anyone willing to put me up for free for a couple days?? I live in UK, Leeds area",-0.5578048780487848,1.5289971219512208,1.9982439024390253,95.34126829268291,89.97560975609754,6.206829268292682,17.956097560975607,7.554174236665415,0.3857960975609762,146,4,35,3,5,50,35,41,0.055,0.785,0.161,0.6662,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,0,1,3,4,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,9,3,1,9,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,24,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2067683412038668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.277830668011753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019544817851803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3271991261252256,0.0,0.19070943984993444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2619125978836662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2787704640156633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3239374701241797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284659545266414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.261118652951296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31429450281705257,0.0,0.2192663141515864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2972717116667118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964575663289704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TeaPartyCat189,2020/04/17,"I need a diagnosis but I can't get one I've been dealing with Anxiety, depression, stage fright, ect for many years and it seems to just continue to get worse. It's gotten to the point where my last therapist said I should drop out of high school because of my anxiety attacks. Most of this was due to my mom's awful parenting skills by saying that I ""half ass everything you do"", ""can't do anything right"", ""just overreacting and you're too sensitive"", ""you're acting like a bitch"", ""a lot of the times I just want to slap you across the face"". She never hit me unless it was spanks as a child. 

I'm a teen currently, had bully problems in middle school, caused suicidal depression and that's when all the on and off therapy began. I'd be on and off therapy due to not being able to make my appointments, they'd be too expensive, too far away, ect. Today I tried to find a psychiatrist near me but I don't have a car and the closest one is 40 minutes of a drive away.",3.71311224489796,4.7352449030612265,5.101632653061227,83.42193877551021,71.90816326530611,9.273469387755103,26.755102040816325,9.606745405546679,2.227789795918368,755,25,160,18,14,253,123,196,0.24100000000000002,0.727,0.031,-0.9938,2,0,0,0,1,0,29.0,0,2,1,1,8,7,2,1,13,1,16,2,2,2,2,27,27,11,1,4,7,2,0,1,0,1,0,2,0,1,6,8,0,0,2,0,1,3,5,6,0,3,7,2,17,1,28,14,3,33,0,2,0,1,10,17,2,3,12,103,23,2,0.14568725873740848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22290070834110945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11988820058195535,0.0,0.0,0.1657402889093519,0.2737559506301809,0.0,0.0,0.08880960070607702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14966094612570946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1501971666522041,0.250960444945797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309343141845103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13315551513876228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1522311593408777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15392658764162048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187545604903882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07117543567141214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12385809755287043,0.0,0.0,0.09724737648732433,0.14770401384028664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17062715665122186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802525635723584,0.11236299527290128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19744291387271834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16176845990321498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377215497904029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940303111763722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12441612294008908,0.13858194510583424,0.11585635560638385,0.0,0.29488656742758634,0.0,0.13262820872376166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935821505979705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.333212154273448,0.16915413623861744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08495141215568276,0.0,0.13809448651902445,0.0,0.0,0.09891208551987556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08593011983004108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1484677630641381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09381781808248732
mentalhealth,morose-melonhead,2020/04/17,"seeking advice on managing an eating disorder while living with non-understanding family i'm asking for ideas on how to manage my eating disorder (anorexia with purging) while living in quarantine with my family.
basically, i've struggled with an ed for years. i've received extensive treatment in the states for it, but while i've certainly improved, recent events have caused my symptoms to be severe again. my family is from an asian culture not very well-versed in mental health, and they've come a long way in trying to educate themselves, but they still don't know what to do 90% of the time. we also don't really have options for therapy.
now that i've moved back in with them and spending time with them 24/7, their lack of understanding has made much more of an impact on me and my disorder. my parents continue to do and say very triggering things, and when they ""catch"" me purging or not eating, they just tell me to ""just stop doing that."" i feel extremely isolated and defeated, and while i lack the motivation to turn my situation around completely, i am looking for ways to make things marginally more manageable.
thank you for reading and for any advice you might have! hope everyone is staying safe.",10.377027027027026,8.716591387387393,9.704936936936935,65.02362162162164,58.54954954954955,13.564684684684687,40.218018018018014,12.340626583579946,5.053776936936936,976,40,162,26,10,313,131,222,0.121,0.7909999999999999,0.08800000000000001,-0.7145,1,1,0,0,0,0,30.0,1,2,6,2,10,6,0,1,8,0,14,5,0,6,1,42,26,18,0,3,7,1,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,6,17,3,2,5,1,1,4,4,2,0,0,1,3,22,4,34,23,5,34,0,1,1,0,15,9,0,4,17,115,28,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213408633439098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08732338740515957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07425650207601761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09720690701977183,0.10208280144368384,0.0,0.0,0.0839643930211874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121735822513615,0.0,0.09406202337386152,0.11448912299752458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3754415875612429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3352019481983959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043407234268482,0.0,0.0,0.3088186391927964,0.0,0.055212390138743864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606942518535142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845550357784436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326812539292975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060010843685538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1928427804263235,0.09663434395378782,0.09169649317526528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10332316854266778,0.07288866512956024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11004311064395424,0.1158388849416361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605725043176884,0.08027105952439442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12124838250980514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922478156280872,0.0,0.06995326158345598,0.0,0.10781711797410938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08683643108897311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12335953072699744,0.0,0.0,0.12274001562417705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638758819204352,0.08720345315458082,0.09129210320882268,0.0,0.11415456508551955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349565592932635,0.0,0.0,0.0954414455524004,0.10053229858308008,0.12487426400188002,0.0,0.1450889199161652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12734523555411098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07413639461692177,0.11877305597899987,0.0,0.2273521745241245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801950041403978,0.0,0.1733481847382457,0.0,0.0,0.09817962719244022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031814916150206
mentalhealth,sarahchowdury123,2020/04/17,How to Maintain Your Mental Health During Quarantine l TIPS FOR MENTAL H... A video for people who are in need of some positivity during these difficult times!,7.1014285714285705,8.965137714285717,7.57,65.72500000000001,64.71428571428571,9.885714285714286,28.285714285714285,10.125756701596842,3.1729428571428566,128,4,19,3,2,42,25,28,0.083,0.7979999999999999,0.11900000000000001,0.2714,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,1,0,3,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,2,1,2,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,12,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4149288758272657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7867716087870122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894431221559821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706228532229778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22761901054496736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,deedeeaz,2020/04/17,"I miss seemingly obvious details Don’t know if this is a common thing but I don’t pay attention to insignificant detail at all and I seem to be the one only one. Today my friend asked if my dad had a beard and moustache and I had to turn around and check. I see him everyday lol it’s just irrelevant to me and I imagined he had no beard/moustache. And like what colour my best friends room wall is (purple), I remembered it as white.. anyone relate or get it?",0.8810251450676994,3.2554330212765983,2.932088974854935,89.26136363636364,85.80851063829786,6.396905222437137,21.31141199226305,7.686295010490155,1.0066723404255322,360,12,76,7,11,121,66,94,0.086,0.706,0.20800000000000002,0.9468,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,1,2,5,0,0,3,1,8,0,0,0,2,20,16,11,0,2,5,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,6,7,0,0,6,0,2,0,3,1,0,2,3,4,12,4,7,12,2,7,0,1,4,0,6,4,0,5,4,52,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1714659179769737,0.0,0.0,0.21830083543752452,0.2292507962878236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2573468516848097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789180141535469,0.0,0.12811911646217697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13476837925929502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980377698645285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3323394735560914,0.18650346217131367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2777903330061249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19541131767872655,0.44648438580436456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16291554479757636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324431302726676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26673266481372304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,teaforsnail,2020/04/17,"How do I start being human again? After a lengthy list of issues and trauma that no one has the time to read about, it's made me into some dysfunctional alien cyborg. My emotions are limited, and when I do feel something it's like I just got electrocuted, and I can't really put them out normally. My therapist told me to reference childhood, but I can't. I was hardly any better then, I just had more feelings and expressions. There's not much to take from that time, I wasnt really raised (raised by myself and the internet). Most, if not all influences around me were awful.

 
That being said, I'd like to learn how to have normal emotions/expressions. I'm usually very blank, and sometimes I laugh at stuff. I cant smile on cue or when the social context calls for it, and if its forced it's obvious because I'm a terrible actor. Learning to comfort people would be great, my therapist suggested that I think about what I would want when being comforted (from childhood to right now), but the answer is always ""Nothing"". I don't know/understand what people want, I like being left alone when I'm upset. Lastly, whatever the feeling is when you guys get gifts from loved ones. I hate those holidays/events specifically because I can't mimic that feeling and they think I hate the gift. I'm *really* tired of accidentally making people feel uncomfortable, and I want these amazing lifelong relationships that normal people have.",5.688787699586044,7.176694011235956,6.286780997437415,75.01876995860441,67.68913857677903,9.516183717721267,29.40843682239306,9.811843763644266,2.9500681647940072,1139,41,196,26,19,371,156,267,0.156,0.6709999999999999,0.17300000000000001,0.6505,0,1,1,0,0,0,41.0,0,1,2,2,15,15,2,1,8,1,24,2,0,5,2,50,49,22,0,10,9,0,6,3,0,2,1,1,0,2,16,12,0,1,11,2,0,1,9,5,0,2,8,7,28,10,22,34,5,24,0,0,0,1,13,7,0,5,19,135,44,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11493579672300687,0.0,0.0,0.0923394192085062,0.0,0.0,0.0754662572590969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879056038763302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1352976770445624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814765620409437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11331705954026505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1248310313198377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2805594339627375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057979435975585976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08875620047661589,0.12234944045053135,0.0,0.10988189921131117,0.0,0.0,0.09941108010204293,0.2191280826611546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11582822633852526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06098851469292293,0.09045877948473906,0.0,0.0,0.12057378628233573,0.0,0.0,0.1626491567197948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015854263670697,0.1050064654282214,0.07407613609793345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815788013058682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3261934436488501,0.10648273195272084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15039797152280435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30774213213923274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155971605858962,0.0,0.0,0.11100422500442196,0.0,0.21327873063690808,0.0,0.0,0.11914475322092224,0.0,0.09477135516235287,0.10556187114944113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312421528108997,0.0,0.08543335610468543,0.109756315282391,0.0,0.07854810556084155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12703890157095007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08343878283744556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2576991847008533,0.0,0.1422155649057555,0.0,0.0,0.12941988968465876,0.12754851082295954,0.0,0.10604059788151417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11552804947294948,0.0,0.0,0.12222239616739125,0.09156533205228368,0.19636636425677392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15766576655708514,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,banditongmariaclara,2020/04/17,"For those who are in their 20s, 30s, 40s and so on who struggled with mental health earlier in their life, how are you? For those who are in their 20s, 30s, 40s and so on, who struggled earlier in life with their mental health and just starting to live a normal life, how are you? How do you cope with your ""lost years""? How do you cope now?

How did you go to school/work again? How did you socialize again and go back to the real world?",1.1901747815230976,3.2731815505618016,1.7902621722846457,99.84047440699128,81.80898876404493,5.303870162297129,16.630461922596755,6.42735559955562,-0.597532833957553,334,6,79,3,9,102,42,89,0.09300000000000001,0.907,0.0,-0.8219,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,7,4,1,13,3,0,2,2,0,8,5,0,6,0,16,12,12,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,6,7,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,3,0,0,3,0,11,0,14,9,0,15,0,1,0,0,16,7,0,0,6,58,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14781069866437085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21849406961473414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4086566272417291,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4073268478944088,0.0,0.0,0.1697399640583481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098384795896217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3874392104133742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18834164778193452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21879641151716056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19454398799563946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959512202797204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.136059261026141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40191479778244266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13994354648138985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237878865357166
mentalhealth,GreatBoulder,2020/04/17,"I recently learned about Childhood Emotional Neglect. I recommend checking it out I just wanted to be able to share this optimistic news. I was reading a cognitive behavioral health book and I realized that it wasn’t talking about the root of my issues: my childhood. So I went to google and discovered Childhood Emotional Neglect. There’s a free questionnaire online and then I bought a book called “Running On Empty” and it’s really helping. I feel validated, and reassured that I’m not crazy or overly-sensitive. I’m going to be working on recognizing and naming my feelings, and working through the feelings I pushed down throughout my childhood. If anyone has any other books or reading they’d recommend, I appreciate it too.",6.121543340380549,8.750912387596903,6.546427061310787,69.01553911205076,68.53488372093024,9.962226920366456,38.85905567300916,10.230975488527342,4.974792248062016,594,35,86,17,11,192,82,129,0.06,0.722,0.218,0.9487,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,1,2,7,5,0,0,5,0,6,1,0,1,0,24,15,12,0,2,5,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,8,8,0,2,5,5,3,4,2,2,0,0,4,3,15,4,12,8,0,14,0,2,0,0,7,4,0,3,6,61,23,8,0.2098481450687419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14270393464626044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673070224446566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2142784185443504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4721018368283814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31831658213407016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11926153679496684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22305876526641413,0.0,0.0,0.14065678823052508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21902694319205426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4198098659140895,0.0,0.1344340951998911,0.0,0.2071997269865288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16866799009979758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12377387293950533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19453133285732485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30554389777877883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mrbuddy101,2020/04/17,"Habits that lead to depression I found this video and I thought this might help   


 [https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Utwgqq2EPCU&t=7s](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Utwgqq2EPCU&t=7s)",31.574791666666666,41.49248856250001,5.665000000000003,63.94666666666669,38.375,7.133333333333333,24.08333333333333,7.793537801064563,2.0061083333333336,171,3,14,2,3,26,14,16,0.21600000000000005,0.64,0.14400000000000002,-0.3313,0,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,8,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7286413413272839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2896068119932945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36867463303651815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2253775359090311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3567021758048312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669404974800914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-fivehearts-,2020/04/17,"This week I finally realised I have a problem and I need help. 17/M

I understand if no one wants to read this, but I’d just like to vent to feel less alone before I can get some help. Paragraphs on paragraphs get long and boring, so I’ve tried to summarise how I feel. I really want to get a diagnosis and start helping myself. I've known something isn't right with my mental health for years but brushed it off because I feel guilty and that my problems aren't bad enough, other people have it worse. I realise now I need to face this and I'd like to just put this out there as my own recognition of the start of fighting this.

\> I very often feel worthless and empty in a weird way like I’ve been disconnected from something, it’s almost like a physical heaviness or weight in my head and upper body.

\> I’m constantly trying to prove my own worth to myself, the only thing that give me any sense of self worth is making music, and even that is getting joyless and frustrating, for a while it’s become less and less enjoyable and I’ve become more and more critical of myself. I thought it was perfectionism or writer’s block for ages, but I genuinely just hate everything I create and never think it’s good enough which makes me delete countless hours of work. I’ve made over 500 hours of music in the last 3 years and released about 3, and most of that I hate. I constantly compare myself to my friends who also make music and who are doing undeniably better than me. They have big characters and confidence and are unapologetically them, and promote constantly on social media. I feel like an annoyance and a burden to people when I promote my music or ask someone to even give it a listen, so I keep most of it to myself. It breaks my heart because its the only thing I’ve ever felt good at and I hide it away because I feel like I hate it, and other people will hate it.

\> I oversleep and sleep erratically through the day any time I can. I sometimes shiver and shake for no apparent reason. I feel tired and drained after little to no exertion. When I feel very low I neglect my hygiene and only really get out of bed to eat or use the toilet. I sleep to avoid feeling low.

\> I feel little sexual desire most of the time even though I have an attractive and amazingly supportive girlfriend, who I tend to cut off when I feel especially low then feel extremely guilty about doing.

\> I usually feel spaced out and sad and empty, I feel trapped in my head and my home. I'm usually alternating from rapid negative thoughts to just staring at nothing blankly, feeling heavy and low. I lose focus easily and find it hard to concentrate on things.

\> At social events I’m on edge and jittery and don’t approach or talk to people unless I’m intoxicated. I have a general hatred for most people and always see the worst in people around me and humanity in general.

\> I was bullied relentlessly throughout all of secondary (high) school and it’s become a blur in my memories like I’ve subconsciously tried to block it out, I’m obviously not qualified to say this for myself but I think my school experience sort of ‘traumatised’ me (for lack of a better word) in a way, it destroyed my confidence and social skills and although college built my sociability back up, I think there are lots of parts of my brain that haven’t repaired.

\> I became obsessed with documenting my life and thoughts that I thought were important for a period, I now realise it was a desperate attempt to try and feel more self worth, I tried to convince myself my thoughts are important and that I could publish them or somehow release them when I die, which almost gave me some peace of mind for a few days. I still have an obsession with having a legacy/ memories of me when I’m dead so my life wasn’t meaningless, through my music, but like I said, I don’t have the confidence or self assurance to push it.

\> I find it very difficult to open up emotionally to people or befriend people. I feel uncomfortable spending time with my family and have a strained relationship with them. I’m distrusting and cautious and don’t speak to people first but I’ll latch on to people and become too reliant or clingy if they show me extended kindness or friendship.

\> I have subconsciously given up on happiness and begun to constantly thinking about leaving a good impression after my death.

\> I punch and claw myself, I'm easily irritable and have explosive angry outbursts over minor things.

There are more and this is just the start. I’m realising that so many little problems my life are probably due to depression. I’ve felt so sad but been unable to cry for so long, and at some points wished I could cry to try and relieve some of the emotional weight, but this morning collecting all these thoughts and realising this made me completely break down, and I’m tearing up writing this now. I just want to be happier.",5.339862609142274,6.6216680889830535,5.975681818181819,77.69517847971237,68.32203389830508,9.238161273754494,30.51065742167437,9.535469947879287,2.825852259887005,3932,153,720,83,66,1279,382,944,0.223,0.64,0.13699999999999998,-0.9988,1,3,2,1,2,0,104.0,0,0,6,9,40,58,10,5,31,0,41,17,8,8,7,179,116,93,3,15,28,0,22,8,2,1,6,4,2,4,50,65,3,5,35,2,4,4,13,34,0,2,20,29,101,24,112,92,26,100,0,10,2,0,33,47,0,27,53,481,151,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155401805754268,0.047346994497660465,0.0,0.03655830096571541,0.0380385754293654,0.0,0.0,0.0621755896610104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04069607774474812,0.04273739131632742,0.0,0.04295078492016786,0.03515204393331647,0.03817014887534805,0.08360239220353599,0.20195468009429968,0.03890013196193218,0.0,0.0,0.08086247576031863,0.0,0.050779103713756886,0.0,0.051033103503225895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04793134966723711,0.1976068706661594,0.0,0.07299947913490695,0.0,0.10043164963799624,0.0589648377686924,0.0,0.039374296958746016,0.0,0.047444994038338566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04677789868470388,0.0,0.10284653383108358,0.0,0.0944717134257278,0.0,0.09058305829896032,0.04135187090876427,0.0,0.0,0.041085730222578665,0.04471808114121214,0.04309607117068028,0.0,0.39295326266008257,0.06531766741006037,0.08778721493705285,0.05007859177842229,0.08356543671096538,0.0388851896641902,0.0,0.0,0.03531932649724443,0.0,0.1194211078872708,0.08770806392101657,0.0,0.11503081983130335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048664510139866814,0.04095169648444033,0.18053655031502966,0.09383363964358657,0.04859294978051831,0.0,0.054172542500599705,0.09192548302611857,0.048300449682073414,0.04585591248913348,0.0,0.09004021159837136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040633628024655935,0.0,0.04760517933243396,0.0,0.03726385909910082,0.0,0.04840562662150447,0.0,0.0,0.09686965410342764,0.1786724750762754,0.13745543953361358,0.0,0.08091274365012319,0.0,0.051143436297390064,0.0,0.03886529221643165,0.0,0.08651335236889818,0.09154543253454678,0.04634787529327401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04607000802041147,0.0,0.04615915849955726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06779424580273014,0.03525825708513501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043864813814373065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030977694213538756,0.10430504373897337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04950493341388988,0.0,0.3169305267054785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04321548919980003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049288545096831525,0.13122935796581006,0.0,0.04595624177136187,0.0,0.0,0.045727411131691285,0.0,0.05857245043955536,0.04700267494158048,0.0,0.049080844575960764,0.0,0.03904039437096928,0.0434854716718109,0.036354434669488234,0.0,0.09253212216408706,0.036428968127944,0.0,0.143072270376207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09149610969557008,0.13980217872524098,0.038734205034841526,0.07038734244220908,0.04521334348325473,0.0,0.0970720218024045,0.0,0.03650808999063708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051876885635900365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03674401749113647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12148416498035085,0.11716940693945925,0.04491479468482102,0.21775581200776187,0.07997042235094345,0.0525427135174729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862250680457453,0.0,0.0,0.04759096885980228,0.0,0.039483116689516685,0.10069731595935394,0.11315908698063908,0.08089174507048942,0.07257294177237535,0.03666984759338195,0.11133720601508376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052570039885502816,0.0,0.0,0.03328109357813157,0.0,0.04658753129761711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05887797385758236
mentalhealth,Tellmehow1234,2020/04/17,"Morning wood Hi everybody. I need to know your experience about normal morning wood. When you wake up with one, does it tend to go down fast when you get up? I maintain it for minutes while I stay in bed but when I get up it goes down. I really appreciate your answers. Please also tell your age.",0.6983474576271185,3.208472966101694,2.4862500000000023,90.37310381355934,90.52542372881358,5.661864406779661,20.934322033898304,7.1686216300943375,0.7682694915254241,231,8,48,4,8,76,41,59,0.0,0.882,0.11800000000000001,0.7869,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,5,0,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,6,6,6,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,10,0,11,6,0,14,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,6,31,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2585953524142621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829794145038081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3163136044764773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3378903577468931,0.0,0.18377612167780927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17771327627885827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397714940507909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3168296296627522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21912089841493929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35495832245451514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20715628274667716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34466470300245344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2826357861386778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dhaablu,2020/04/17,"Effects of mentally ill mother Hi,

I am 26 and living with my parents.

My mother has schizophrenia and has always been emotionally cold and unavailable since i can remember. She is there physically like cooks and smiles, but has never been psychologically supportive. I cannot remember a single moment when she has asked why I was sad or how my day went. 

My father has been verbally abusive towards and treats her like a child. 

I have been feeling so immature as compared to my peers and even others who are younger. Somewhere, I feel, I have not grown mentally and emotionally regarding maturity. I have always felt disconnected at times from everyone around me. Like I do not understand anyone and vice versa. 

I am really private, closed and reticent by nature. I wouldn't say I love my parents, but yeah taking care of them is my duty which I am fulfilling. 


Does having such a family environment contribute to my state of mind ? Am I regressing ?",5.610476190476191,7.909516701754391,6.7010568086883895,68.77434210526317,69.11695906432749,10.499749373433584,31.512531328320804,10.608840637214634,4.0721408521303255,760,33,121,24,14,254,112,171,0.105,0.785,0.109,-0.4486,2,0,0,0,1,0,19.0,0,0,1,1,7,8,0,0,3,1,25,3,0,2,1,29,35,16,0,1,5,5,3,3,0,1,1,1,0,1,3,12,1,1,7,1,0,2,5,1,0,0,7,5,27,7,12,27,1,12,0,1,0,1,15,4,0,1,8,92,30,1,0.0,0.17871193316965642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25100956524144746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105465641182202,0.0,0.0,0.1342729671976019,0.14100809366251185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15378385933774188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09727453069539728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1319945999594464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3393326833633316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996234910886008,0.0,0.0,0.1441269860712427,0.0,0.0,0.14219152486735756,0.0,0.15253096055186371,0.0,0.14482292256202636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2210675270922803,0.0,0.13318792421412676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361322848787252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30400751219894995,0.0,0.15229789990952652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11633137784753485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33496344213873464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09662720773586747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.341727801423986,0.0,0.0,0.11994811501198065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1247702619918363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711630149468623,0.0,0.0,0.1134073225921559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795168553634823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702202656222772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982330511609034,0.1361029354761908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UnholygrailReddit,2020/04/17,"Is this okay for a parent to do? I'm pretty sure it isnt but my brain is trying to see the good in the situation. My mother has had a past of making threats and violent gestures towards me, liking almost punching me and threatening to get my dad to beat the fuck out of me. When I didn't want to talk to her about an issue because I was having a panic attack she started slamming my bedroom door and I had to sit on the floor outside it and get one of my friends to call the cops. Then she stopped paying for my food at college because I wouldn't talk to her because I was terrified. When I opened up about sexual abuse she was already aware ofduring an argument she forced on me  she said it never happened and didn't even care, and she never took any responsibility for anything she's done. I also. Opened up about my self harm and suicidal tendacies, she said it was all for a attention over the phone to my grandad. That's not everything she's done but its hard to talk about.",5.178133333333335,5.237781079999999,6.073000000000004,81.20733333333338,68.2,9.066666666666668,31.16666666666667,8.841846274778883,2.353666666666667,776,29,159,12,12,257,114,200,0.271,0.66,0.069,-0.995,1,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,0,1,8,12,4,1,12,1,17,3,1,1,4,23,30,13,1,2,3,3,1,1,1,1,0,2,2,1,7,10,1,1,1,0,1,1,7,6,0,1,13,4,30,6,31,16,1,22,0,0,1,1,23,12,1,1,9,116,37,2,0.0,0.16428605100468668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13884510812691225,0.0,0.15301161448057568,0.1108840738662212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429161769734368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11410302123394915,0.0,0.0,0.15774252689543708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535723375433476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1547872376175531,0.14158445436181774,0.0,0.14137020685056026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837888132008023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09158174078229787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461610699907695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1676647778375133,0.0,0.1071261712052322,0.12818630216280466,0.1448852774703774,0.0,0.0,0.1162990400367896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1226140610464699,0.0,0.1242095725998379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447220417858618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06774088032290544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255472523915027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2138818861789422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395767425298414,0.0,0.0,0.16268429179674485,0.15396235764420993,0.0,0.13236394037960014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14106417110311456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637894062684426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11049179765102668,0.0,0.14464964889443369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15585644766236176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09814224541393536,0.0,0.0,0.11592358721315095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15166841864760675,0.0,0.1306827242393016,0.0,0.0,0.3343420981283972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15405319704570744,0.09413910409518034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178358036911537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dannysierrag,2020/04/17,"Video: Staying mentally healthy rather than ""productive"" during this time. Hi guys, 

[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXdaOpl5074](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gXdaOpl5074)

Lately I've felt so much pressure to keep being ""productive"", I made a video about how I feel about this.  In these weird times we've seen ourselves ""stuck"" at home and longing for a desire to feel ""fulfilled"" from home, looking for things to do and keep doing. Perhaps we can shift the conversation from how to stay productive to how to stay mentally healthy rather than put pressure on a mum homeschooling three children and having to work from home, or keep putting pressure on people just trying to keep their businesses afloat, or keep putting even more pressure on people going through depression and other mental health issues... Hope you're staying healthy out there.",12.904480519480526,13.722112954545462,8.391558441558447,68.48590909090912,52.03030303030303,10.573160173160174,40.069264069264065,9.957137785484203,4.092080952380954,698,28,97,10,7,186,84,132,0.11800000000000001,0.7859999999999999,0.096,-0.2671,0,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,1,0,1,1,11,7,0,4,4,0,5,1,0,4,0,25,19,10,0,4,5,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,3,2,5,6,0,5,3,2,0,4,0,6,0,1,4,5,4,1,24,14,2,18,0,1,2,0,7,6,0,3,4,60,9,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525245238714307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07304476197372856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183695316625901,0.0,0.1061853563982699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285180063030966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10950315092191074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11755378490107946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3327974179919905,0.10984249227192006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11542898185053513,0.0,0.4914948351700914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12475223267006508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0978701571499999,0.09286915841699916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464452211051044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3343512075939273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129761002989185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334069297377087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3335255536731311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4715040670059117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07347219845415136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.128973796541163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07508449164990821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051206056490286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Salmanbhairocks,2020/04/17,"Any tips for how to how increase your respect for yourself Ok basically I have very low self-confidence and don't really value myself as a person. I've noticed this about myself lately and it chiefly manifests in being things like poor appearance n not taking proper care of myself. 
To give one example most of my shirts and pants are a size to large for me and exxagereate my skinny frame. 
Is there any way for me to get more self confidence?",4.423428571428573,6.457970670588236,4.971596638655463,81.04647058823531,71.70588235294117,8.151260504201678,26.26050420168067,8.841846274778883,2.117756302521009,357,12,64,7,7,114,65,85,0.111,0.742,0.147,0.5113,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,1,5,2,2,2,0,9,10,7,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,4,1,0,0,0,1,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,9,4,13,9,3,6,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,2,2,43,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3489352042947265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615770267454942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13404047763741062,0.2461129148065526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2894075445419175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12534082292684812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2920919193375695,0.0,0.0,0.1738497072229464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2240157335869485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643570255754681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5352899443315158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19289898421441734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17044511422050626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2116864477344058,0.0,0.2036430567179084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sexy-Ant-Studios,2020/04/17,"Are you ever sitting down on your chair in the living room at home but don’t feel like you’re home? Sometime, I sit in my room and do nothing. I just sit/lay on the floor and don’t feel at home. Or something, I feel like my actions aren’t mine? Like I did something two minutes ago, but don’t feel like /I/ did it. I know it sounds crazy, but I don’t know how else to describe it. I can’t bring it up with my mom because 1, she’ll say I’m either faking being upset because I have nothing to upset over. Or 2, say I’m too young (15y/o). I haven’t felt suicidal in years, but I’m not sober to cutting. I don’t feel safe being me.",-0.6625531914893621,1.1098281347517762,1.7171347517730489,99.494,86.80141843971631,4.043687943262412,18.61985815602837,4.604124745555138,-0.7532490780141843,481,13,120,1,15,163,76,141,0.141,0.731,0.128,-0.5866,1,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,2,0,0,4,9,1,2,2,0,16,0,0,1,1,23,28,9,1,0,9,1,6,4,0,1,0,3,5,0,4,3,0,1,8,0,0,2,9,4,0,1,3,9,19,5,14,22,1,21,0,0,0,0,6,13,0,2,8,69,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355141040419646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18368244012441926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12585748477847294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13628101455051211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3808922854841624,0.3228955953053138,0.14465767150634284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4533741864507112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16559810106230208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29442036890385465,0.0,0.13303594934239155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17645171375623214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891255557883401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396224950062953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319715705415764,0.14900705060512273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479809369333495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471733808456302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09702039878308416
mentalhealth,throwawayg59-ftp,2020/04/17,"Please help. I don’t know what is wrong with me 
I truly need help as I cannot stand feeling this way anymore. 

I have no idea why, but for the past 6 months, my life has just been painful as fuck. Nothing necessarily traumatic has happened, but I find myself never in a good mood, the slightest thing makes me anxious beyond belief, I throw up almost every day when I wake up due to anxiety about the day I’m about to have, I feel like I walk on egg shells when I don’t really have any reason to be. I genuinely cannot find joy in anything I do anymore. I hate it so much. Growing up, I use to be the kind of kid that hated to sit still and always wanted something to do, but now, I get anxious to the point I feel tears in my eyes over something as minor as waking up for work. I don’t get it. I can’t bring myself to do anything. I feel constantly tired. I have no idea what has caused this. I’m not diagnosed with anything but I have been struggling with anxiety for the past couple years now. I just need to get back to the person I use to be because I cannot stand feeling this way. I really need some help here.",2.494713947990544,3.650853991489363,3.9629432624113465,89.90361111111113,75.04255319148936,6.754137115839244,23.69385342789598,7.1686216300943375,0.7431654846335696,868,25,193,9,18,288,120,235,0.221,0.696,0.083,-0.9875,0,0,2,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,1,13,11,3,1,8,0,24,9,3,5,1,34,47,12,0,4,7,0,5,1,0,0,4,0,0,2,9,4,1,0,12,0,0,4,11,6,0,0,2,6,31,4,34,42,2,35,1,0,1,1,5,11,1,2,16,127,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051184432707905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734856029716351,0.0,0.0,0.07138737690901832,0.0,0.1606129238636345,0.2371863222512858,0.20821625151057715,0.0,0.0,0.2591592630035592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08072017404488427,0.0,0.06399248231520417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783941569473628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11344191694013694,0.0,0.0,0.1161541053620983,0.0,0.13540185533012788,0.0,0.0,0.10654857524094907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844692791731489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26539545997247005,0.07499497741223526,0.0,0.0,0.19189258548498528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704875248234536,0.16453710569285693,0.0,0.0,0.08804900804557092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09283005641461503,0.0,0.0,0.2072844155312436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21108988720839575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370105750277524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10931649859227556,0.0576921427354882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414775419346614,0.05128604083643997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700723904914401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379095567525514,0.0,0.07716954368908929,0.2335154392793972,0.08096407292362126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072744026661723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11170201733840156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004232132567928,0.0,0.0916611187996626,0.0,0.11523228108215088,0.09923638626135392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345008103279928,0.10793295858007143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1616315268400935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383408326642047,0.0,0.0,0.1097438572490606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06974148473068728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1206546335674416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18133136480246612,0.0,0.0,0.06191764887859701,0.1666503518807676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0947246409086243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07642388223931089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11477493275248693,0.0,0.06760119420381312
mentalhealth,spareto478,2020/04/17,"Physical punishment as discipline from a parent TW: physical abuse
emotional abuse
suicidal thoughts

I feel silly for resenting my father who has:
- struck me with a wooden stick when i was around 5 or 6. I can't remember the reason.
- slapped my cheek hard when I was 9 for refusing to go on a family trip
- called me a ""burden"" when I was 23, suicidal and refusing to talk to anyone and going out of my room.

My mother also believed in ""spare the rod, spoil the child"" kind of discipline, but she only hit me once with a plastic hanger and I recall not being scared, confident that she wouldn't really hurt me. My father, on the other hand, seemed really intent on making the punishment painful.

I am 25 now. My father has had several strokes. It affected some parts of his brain, and his judgement and emotional control isn't as good. He'd cry a lot and make really irrational decisions. Recently, he was also hospitalized because of diabetes. He has not fully recovered. We had to prep his meals and clean him up.

Every time I had to take care of him, I feel spiteful and resentful. I find him pathetic. I don't feel sorry for him. His situation doesn't make me sad (unlike when my mom was in critical condition before and I cried for days)

I also hate him for treating our mom like shit. He's verbally abusive and would always snap at her over mundane questions.

It made me think if I was traumatized by my father. However, I feel silly because it's not as bad as other abuse victims. Those were pretty much the norm in South East Asian families.

My shrink thinks this is the case. He asked me how I would feel if my father was in critical condition. My honest answer was ""relieved"". I feel like an asshole, but it's really how I feel. Maybe some complicated grief, but mostly relief.

I don't love my father, I only take care of him out of duty and because my relatives would guilt trip me for not loving him.

Sorry for such a long post. I haven't told anyone about this except my sibling and my shrink. Do you think I have been traumatized like my shrink has said, or am I just an asshole?

edit: i go to therapy because i have been diagnosed with major depressive disorder and generalized anxiety disorder. my psychiatrist also thinks i might have bipolar depression  or bipolar II, but I moved cities and haven't seen him in a long time.",4.0212638754826235,5.970615051339286,5.488858590733589,77.27607384169887,72.59375,9.396814671814672,27.73310810810811,9.836113211274913,2.9628238899613906,1845,70,331,51,37,621,224,448,0.248,0.637,0.115,-0.9972,2,0,0,0,4,0,60.0,2,1,0,1,15,33,8,2,17,0,39,13,4,10,0,79,71,37,3,6,15,10,10,3,0,5,6,1,2,1,11,21,1,6,19,0,0,6,12,18,0,0,19,12,71,15,45,44,7,35,0,5,1,2,45,17,1,12,14,228,82,2,0.0,0.35609439151548206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2403441836399329,0.06251897733821511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05747865627718371,0.0,0.0,0.10507335088506273,0.0,0.0,0.06688676254458235,0.0702417997793163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0627352272159997,0.18320826527968764,0.0,0.06393500390406677,0.08465228010181734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08387636512154717,0.07672201902671692,0.0,0.15321184445973432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08427115187515576,0.0,0.0,0.16506622440203714,0.048456354037992304,0.0,0.12942865243957755,0.07626122214545898,0.0,0.0,0.1722241974119671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16903525027742494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330512447240552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14166262886942269,0.0,0.2659363104295145,0.053677007123696635,0.0,0.0,0.06867273005126381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810416406790576,0.06302031676224576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06730688927156023,0.07418101473610555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043439281723531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07824233936922062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012262184672617,0.0,0.0,0.13298557923201526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387774242056403,0.13562592684698418,0.07109527966219104,0.15046112419935892,0.0,0.0754839771185104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07970717542678785,0.0,0.17599620497751434,0.0,0.07985742977737086,0.055233434148029614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08001713993638833,0.0,0.11428827345523615,0.07994975380079865,0.0,0.08342937779306643,0.08136471398567471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195929556428837,0.07644008707130957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416925492847623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19253558580153068,0.07725208255931748,0.07418750569554332,0.0,0.08511417743189847,0.0,0.0714713205556262,0.0,0.07522401054025123,0.0,0.0,0.06840078058635503,0.0,0.08488203042680406,0.07712578533411947,0.0,0.08445575043451195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682166799217179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16437266864760838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11298549239438953,0.06039128360916288,0.0,0.0,0.08592429797734799,0.0,0.0,0.19257586317296968,0.0,0.059649406435920836,0.08762454019814896,0.0,0.0,0.07179544546317072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1601228798743629,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LiamGTR,2020/04/17,"I live with my depressed mother, and her Mam died last week (on my birthday) and I feel she's going downhill. It's completely wearing me out. I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know how to support my mother during this time. I'm completely exhausted and can barely see straight from my constant headaches. She's on anti-depressant and off work on bereavement and has been given a further 2 weeks sick. She already wants 2 more weeks as well a sher meds being extended (which was agreed with the doc she was going to start coming off).

Obviously this is already an INCREDIBLY difficult time, especially to lose a mother. She hasn't been able to see her, or the rest of our family. The funeral is in 1hr and I'm at my end at how to cope and help her.

Any advice is appreciated.",4.364293255131969,5.505053980645162,5.740293255131968,79.00498533724341,70.48387096774194,8.991202346041055,29.574780058651037,9.339509955726095,2.580548387096774,617,24,120,13,11,208,96,155,0.13699999999999998,0.7709999999999999,0.092,-0.8486,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,0,0,2,3,6,0,0,7,0,14,3,1,2,1,19,28,11,2,1,1,3,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,5,11,0,0,3,0,0,3,3,4,1,0,5,3,19,2,20,22,2,23,0,2,2,0,14,11,0,1,9,78,24,1,0.15694659182180073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15336639309667047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34638893359918793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10672906436678203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15564884627995826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13519559185351038,0.3291110309825828,0.16960350946114505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2703557391200463,0.0,0.16288578363977632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390080961376479,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14795527888062196,0.0,0.07935691254254545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17839272993591446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1051979922059839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17250748471458774,0.12793241971733624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1385867159735065,0.0,0.0,0.17558309086517654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17433228243757642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2501322274764642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11108760549114544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17810113249812073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830336396447001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925711662024768,0.0,0.3776792672609016,0.0,0.14111383457574506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11425898807115795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soap-prince,2020/04/17,"experienced trauma and now i want to take baths all the time not sure what i’m really asking for, validation? advice? anyways, about a month ago i was in an extremely serious car accident and have been suffering from some bad ptsd and i’ve started seeing a therapist about it but it’s still in the beginning stages so i’m very much staying stagnant. for the last few weeks, all i’ve wanted to do is take baths? i’ve never really been a bath person and i never really found them relaxing but i started taking them to help with back pain and now it’s all i want to do. i will sometimes take 2-3 baths a day now that i’m stuck in quarantine and work from home. it’s just really comforting and relaxing and i’m not sure what to do. is this normal? should i just let it play out until i start getting better or is there something i can implement in my day to break this? advice welcomed.",1.8866666666666667,4.106555222222223,3.912222222222223,84.825,80.1111111111111,7.777777777777778,22.222222222222207,8.680891452615391,1.6482222222222225,700,22,141,17,18,238,102,180,0.109,0.73,0.162,0.9324,0,1,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,2,2,12,13,0,0,8,0,14,1,0,0,7,31,34,13,0,5,7,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,5,1,10,10,0,0,1,7,0,1,4,5,0,0,5,2,12,8,19,26,6,28,0,1,1,0,6,5,0,2,19,94,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26126055531170944,0.11849900820503485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12497249508213025,0.0,0.0,0.10279145502979964,0.11161698446451963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182288511655665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17242472390333444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14657291578053175,0.0,0.0,0.06984213756838635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08960270013029635,0.0,0.13409166122513094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10896681581555552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13669657331343454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10670187910407238,0.0,0.0982699774083292,0.0,0.2062040861391149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13097774513721122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224464983925394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1167239774017034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15626444190016492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34255461314079483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10652543124402816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10291318136493953,0.13221266371373086,0.0,0.28385758684992024,0.14248479750994447,0.10675679905314668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2519831128045125,0.0,0.4020420586309569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521246116223622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07794972120156063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102997711185641,0.23654329152150505,0.0,0.10722980993637783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09732043008277796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,confusedteen12,2020/04/17,"Finally made friends and I'll never see them again (17M) I spent my entire childhood having no friends, no social skills, no talents, and being socially isolated from the entire earth after being homeschooled from 7th to 10th grade. I somehow made a couple of nice friends with embarrassing social skills and was starting to feel great about myself for once in my life, and now I'll never see them in person again since we're going to be locked in our houses until at least Fall 2021 lmao",10.24108695652174,8.093893543478263,9.027826086956527,71.30304347826089,59.21739130434782,10.93913043478261,36.04347826086956,8.841846274778883,3.1222304347826086,394,12,67,4,4,122,66,92,0.107,0.6779999999999999,0.215,0.9274,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,1,0,2,2,5,7,0,1,2,0,5,1,0,2,2,11,13,5,0,0,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,1,2,5,1,0,0,4,3,8,6,15,6,1,16,0,0,2,0,10,4,0,1,10,44,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19452209544858376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889101394298407,0.0,0.0,0.1925830188762549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40747366968371207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991259826016233,0.0,0.0,0.19382284999992103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20285245316450184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12417448762190693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3326971063009493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2711794141422371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1872238989550808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535039406871451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28018362367965743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14542562451922592,0.0,0.0,0.5376254536771015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12443389708882675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dioorrr0325,2020/04/17,"Advise please?? I haven’t talked to anyone about this because I’m not sure if this is normal or not. I’m young (13 F) and have been diagnosed with depression, ADD and anxiety. I went to a very bad therapist for a short amount of time and learned nothing about any of my own issues. I look up stuff from time to time but I’m never able to get a clear identification from google of how I feel. 

I feel almost crazy from time to time. Just about 10 minutes ago I made up my mind I wanted to kill myself. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. These thoughts come in except their too strong to just be random  thoughts, except I don’t feel suicidal either. It’s so hard to explain. But I feel so sure. I was just about to kill myself literally. 

This happens multiple times week with other things too. An idea pops up in my head which happens to everyone I assume, you get random thoughts you would actually never do, but my body decides to do them. I have no control. I feel blanked out. I feel empty. I feel not me like someone is controlling me but I know it’s me also but it’s not. It’s like another conscience inside of me. Sometimes I have these thoughts except I don’t remover blanking out my conscience or coming back in, almost like sleeping, you don’t remember when you sleep and when you wake up. Someone please help me. I’ll be posting this on other sub-reddits too so I can try to find the right help somewhere.",1.9736813186813225,4.143498870629372,3.20545954045954,90.27379370629372,79.52447552447552,5.903896103896104,23.500999000999,7.021680442328713,0.8059404595404596,1111,38,230,13,28,359,145,286,0.174,0.76,0.066,-0.9852,0,0,0,0,0,2,32.0,0,5,2,3,18,11,2,0,5,0,18,6,5,4,5,69,45,19,3,4,19,0,8,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,16,12,0,2,21,0,0,4,12,5,0,0,8,9,40,6,40,34,3,31,0,1,1,0,12,12,0,8,17,154,56,2,0.09367369483454782,0.0,0.09141201356558797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303607852349963,0.0,0.18760134847923068,0.0,0.0,0.0749108199158141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370132469536058,0.09822503659393626,0.07166012015225133,0.0,0.0,0.06549882545020573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07202928919565901,0.07821362243400024,0.05710261492333906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040503577383154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16138318732834914,0.0,0.0,0.21012602798578045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08068101609958639,0.09507682844128036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0895092297124122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315496428156785,0.0669205063066902,0.0,0.0,0.08561606003670838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09788127862375114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567067796012536,0.0,0.0839132311829786,0.0,0.0961362357618601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557500618171002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10574619946688127,0.0,0.09777100021730174,0.0,0.0,0.207272128843782,0.0,0.10296122580461847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13729270696520862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866231133812053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863631498763604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09458372841420117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1444938565130246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0917803321292464,0.08988243658726912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20565117449143405,0.0,0.0,0.0897135058506091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10611403565206534,0.07999682356433087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18748268971334825,0.0,0.15873883530136595,0.0,0.0926456794215426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072339693504218,0.1024638182931,0.0,0.17657269759783822,0.0,0.0,0.07529136761151403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876237960230864,0.06223264050208866,0.0,0.0,0.29746580098152553,0.32773130857154364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06359828988983787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729060854144752,0.05525117221516181,0.0,0.07513938768610466,0.0,0.0,0.08683645358821539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0665431051808597,0.10241748015860644,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,outpostx,2020/04/17,"Developing schizophrenia My friend has been convinced for a few months that 12 aliens live in his head. 8 males, 4 females. He is convinced they are all knowing, they all have names and can control people. He was driving and the alien told him the turn was clear so he turned. I’m scared he’s gonna crash or so somethng bad what can he do to fix this while in quarantine???",1.907702702702704,4.3610602432432435,2.0499324324324317,96.84084459459463,81.70270270270271,4.781081081081081,22.763513513513516,5.985473137389443,0.1633567567567571,294,10,63,2,8,88,61,74,0.114,0.743,0.14300000000000002,0.3317,0,1,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,2,1,2,5,0,1,3,0,10,1,1,1,3,9,16,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,4,0,5,3,4,11,3,5,0,0,0,0,13,2,0,1,2,34,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366102988179888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3178345454662108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2189385329319576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908294330702431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15573812876941326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2502295579084159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22619105524465066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19645987463453946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2837126189235681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2707815458501921,0.0,0.0,0.6164717024583981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jucromesti,2020/04/17,"Should I take PTO now while everyone is working from home? I am feeling quite burnt out lately. Been working hard since October and only to a couple days off at new year's. Was planning on taking some time off around April or May but this whole lockdown situation has made it kinda confusing. Working from home isn't that fun. I feel I'm putting more hours into doing work and being less productive.

Everyone is now working from home. I don't have kids or a family to support while obviously some colleagues do. I feel a bit guilty thinking about asking for time off. Especially since I can't go anywhere. It also seems like it might be a waste. On the flip side, it is slowing down a bit and may be a good time to take a break before things open back up and the pressure to catch up increases again.

How would you navigate this situation?",4.14156205757433,5.936041570552149,4.864417177914111,82.51950448324682,71.94478527607363,7.960169891458236,27.875884851344967,8.617729084823388,2.0874430391694188,668,25,127,12,13,215,109,163,0.105,0.823,0.073,-0.6512,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,1,0,7,8,6,0,2,9,0,21,0,0,2,1,28,34,11,0,2,3,0,4,1,0,5,0,0,3,1,8,8,0,0,5,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,3,4,7,4,21,23,8,35,0,0,0,0,3,14,0,10,17,86,15,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954232906742304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10622358133054408,0.11155175176386746,0.0,0.0,0.09175272420859708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10153586193599344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2605416182723565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320296409303934,0.0,0.07695405291451386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2280382261059957,0.0,0.0,0.11248796627867767,0.0,0.18100126814539044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0678145299755865,0.10008323752564817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10689078906873478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3590748435508177,0.0,0.1175100190210996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13460257203587114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058295636949446686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290717227315132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265838158324966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11524377940448065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907512133092698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11995349075320623,0.0,0.12691567008932378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10862800953842687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19741194894157105,0.2682501569464631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354073632128231,0.0,0.0,0.26915019917119115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07927350616011683,0.07645794580960236,0.0,0.0,0.208736200965452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1332208883418666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4343461515676819,0.0,0.0,0.08476428472115269,0.0,0.0,0.07684068823371637
mentalhealth,anon8535,2020/04/17,My little cousin might be sexually harassing my sister? I’m scared and so confused My sister (19) just confided in me that my cousin (m12) who we started fostering 3 years ago has been making inappropriate comments towards her. Today he took a picture on her phone of his penis. She told me he has Called her a bitch and other nasty names. He said he saw her ass and has made comments about her breast. I never in a million years would’ve thought something like this would happen. We love my cousin dearly and my dad said we will find a therapist for him but if it doesn’t work out he will be kicked out. I’m in complete shock. My sister is incredibly scared that I now have to lock our bedroom door. I don’t know what to do. I feel helpless and confused and scared myself. I know puberty is a complex stage but this isn’t normal.,2.7958181818181806,4.886305430303032,3.7896969696969727,87.48454545454548,76.51515151515152,6.33939393939394,24.333333333333336,7.3011,1.0355333333333343,656,22,131,8,15,211,104,165,0.183,0.78,0.036000000000000004,-0.9755,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,4,0,0,1,4,12,2,5,5,0,17,3,2,2,1,30,33,10,0,3,4,7,1,1,0,4,0,2,2,0,8,11,0,0,6,0,0,1,4,9,0,1,8,4,27,3,12,19,0,17,0,1,1,3,34,8,2,4,8,83,35,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149721172935172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17246752791048928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17709022703991334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08540177834446185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15437310093053552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14935922231765406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18564792278753767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08251684283018634,0.16928388319177945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15244038556729553,0.15981887970353212,0.11274320143677866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17917802056015644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13026740944259554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16548781232342907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3213284042599175,0.0,0.5073002236635047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13002878638265394,0.0,0.0,0.1195494980463805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19610790074424836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408908941445935,0.0,0.0,0.16009906974665022,0.16139281983642126,0.187656011960772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12296245481934605,0.0,0.0,0.2399658542547209,0.0,0.0,0.2175343242048616
mentalhealth,lyricalxmiracle,2020/04/17,"hi... hi... i-i'm new here... i just. i have all these thoughts and ideas and most importantly **feelings** in my head and i- i cant get them out. im stuck inside my own head and honestly, being me, that's petrifying.  I just want to tell my partner how i feel and i cant... i cant, i feel like im being rude or- or attention whorish or something. i dont know what to do. i cant tell where my mental illnesses end and my stupidity begins. i just... I don't know. I feel like I'm losing what was left of my sanity. I just... I wish I weren't alive. I don't want to be alive anymore. I hope when I fall asleep, I don't wake up. And if I do... fuck.",-3.526250000000001,-2.6103111249999955,0.4583888888888907,100.32550000000003,118.58333333333334,4.1422222222222205,13.133333333333333,6.079149491110277,-0.7778566666666666,474,12,126,8,30,173,76,144,0.217,0.6809999999999999,0.102,-0.9392,0,0,1,0,0,4,44.0,0,0,1,1,8,8,3,0,0,0,16,6,4,1,1,32,32,13,0,5,8,0,4,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,4,8,0,0,9,0,0,1,9,4,0,0,4,4,30,4,7,25,3,10,0,1,0,1,6,5,1,6,6,79,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744604115335368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978817394841332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14954402774465705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34148665180599297,0.24124172792393325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15609184474454854,0.08821305340391987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465615087400376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16769834947220408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19060223307238347,0.36475698567232745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1855824574043103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18344748736285035,0.0,0.0,0.16497548951513732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888911749847587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17015317265603574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1630687982474231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1299829340822171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2951509579943237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1340418053215736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19917494637478447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.194160137094171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JakeStoner666,2020/04/17,My friend needs help. My friend is currently a high school student. He's 18. He asked me if everyone's life is better off without him being alive. I tried talking to him and he gave a reason why he wanted to end it. He believes that he is a source of bad luck because the people around him seem to have the worst of luck after knowing him for a while. He told me that one of the worker at school got fired after knowing him. The worker told it's not my friend's fault but my friend believes it's because of him. And one of his friend got unfriended by his previous friends after befriending my friend. I told my friend that i know that it is not his fault people around him are having issues. I think there must be a rational reason why the people's issues appear after knowing him. I'm currently stumped and dont know how to continue convincing him to stay. He has been like this for months now. What do i need to say to get it through him that he is not the source of other people's problem and for him to stay alive?,3.700590111642741,4.7511132535885165,4.410507177033495,88.25821690590112,71.96650717703348,7.295821371610844,24.93811802232855,7.554174236665415,1.0710648165869223,806,23,169,9,15,258,98,209,0.066,0.7390000000000001,0.195,0.9829,2,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,5,18,0,0,11,0,15,1,0,3,1,30,35,8,0,6,6,0,1,1,8,1,1,1,0,0,13,6,0,0,9,0,0,1,5,5,0,2,7,2,27,13,28,25,1,19,0,0,0,0,39,5,0,5,12,110,40,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1680227452065383,0.08822537956820793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879694499313146,0.11505698028179635,0.0,0.0,0.2126505746367931,0.0,0.0834646476661948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060365580924003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08358586404241572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09017679568515266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5832945606340537,0.0,0.049305641955667084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15095633023709154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06325577659417374,0.09970953713517966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1970003660819356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25932279421650645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06665796030661371,0.046105548462586236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753270851991167,0.0,0.0,0.13995175850148814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789825237148764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26170353551420944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09030156466758613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19406092462446467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504865643209874,0.0,0.19101965161499007,0.0,0.08591301545450833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20117667227101046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585289579380347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06046997185966714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.270530387055458,0.0,0.06407261029669813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055663239246052036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1703126796604101,0.0,0.0,0.0909715484813868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,littlekindling,2020/04/17,"How do I take the next step? This is my first post on Reddit, so apologies if I've broken any rules or guidelines.

  
I'll try keeping this short as there's a fair bit to cover.

  
I think I've been struggling with my mental health for a while now but have always kept it suppressed and hidden from people as I feel like its never been as bad as other people have had it. It's gradually gotten worse over the last year or so after I finished my research-oriented degree at university. I've been living out of home for the last 3-4 years in a different country from my family and even though my family and I have had our ups and downs, I think being away from them has made me more likely to ignore my physical and mental health. In terms of my mental health, I and other friends have noticed that I've not been myself for almost a year and tend to get upset very quickly and easily.   


Long story short, I've upset a close friend of mine and it's made me realise how my behaviour affects people. I've finally had enough of this and am seeking help from my doctor. But the thing is, whenever I try to talk to people about this, I always end up having a breakdown and can't stop crying. How do I avoid this when I see my doctor, and what kinds of questions can I expect? I'm not even sure how to bring up this topic, like do I say ""Hey I'm depressed and having intrusive thoughts. I Googled it and think I have this diagnosis."" I mean of course not that, but I'm not sure how to prepare for this kind of conversation. I've done an online questionnaire from a trusted mental health website and I could show her the results, but again, I have no clue how to go about this. I've not even told my parents, as I come from an Asian background where mental health is not talked about often, and the one time I told them that I was feeling very sad, they brushed it off and told me to go outside instead. 

There's a lot of things that have happened over the last year, and if people want to hear about it then I can make a separate post, but **TLDR**; I've accepted that there is definitely something wrong with my mental health and I need to make a change ASAP. But I'm not sure how to go about telling my doctor any of this.

​

Any advice or stories of your own experience is much appreciated!",5.128526689293427,5.243533490280775,5.7682158284480085,83.15924136069115,68.30885529157668,8.342147485344029,27.550833076211052,7.957251820313856,1.548173156433199,1798,51,369,20,28,585,220,463,0.094,0.797,0.109,0.7948,2,1,1,0,0,0,48.0,1,1,3,1,28,21,0,4,19,0,33,9,0,13,4,81,67,48,0,6,18,1,2,3,2,0,9,2,1,0,28,24,0,6,9,1,0,6,10,9,0,2,17,6,47,12,58,48,7,49,0,2,1,0,22,17,0,9,27,256,75,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563577351134288,0.0,0.0,0.06725903042420675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177828156003662,0.07277647918596092,0.08161644863178193,0.1370295907938593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06310652904110603,0.0,0.056082458399367416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07333003873113235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710548175804021,0.057859268040786976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0536281671985171,0.0,0.07378087299576205,0.0,0.0,0.0578516834818889,0.0,0.0,0.07017624400983002,0.0,0.20624782364589586,0.0,0.06873616463201343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059490894518087936,0.06940247934868747,0.0,0.1330914536207083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06570317379404507,0.12663998909193752,0.0,0.06792429857718335,0.04798481893837028,0.0,0.07357923987365278,0.0,0.05713305019624641,0.0,0.0,0.10378763077105366,0.0,0.03509249773673126,0.0,0.1145193342073652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059396423637928464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4283785363481036,0.07570319603547564,0.0,0.04502128172192029,0.0,0.06737496133261837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05970198755970551,0.0,0.1398902319309494,0.0,0.16425260754549426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984446479692227,0.0,0.05931055766294443,0.059441549397092015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05710381536696092,0.0,0.12711193506379284,0.08967029756747318,0.0,0.0,0.07316562211143146,0.0,0.0,0.4061371597005107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04937619436996422,0.0498042067161499,0.05180408760439385,0.0,0.07143390963562253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647119138144813,0.0,0.0,0.04551476214338634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07458209393671353,0.0,0.0,0.23282910341134386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12865671741451035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07524351066394394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05341467429541178,0.0,0.0,0.053524184467794333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05170919318717517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05615543957173983,0.0,0.07021855731415133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899150811455718,0.0,0.05050196243909005,0.10797415745492032,0.058707775809456415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08924684379594641,0.12911559000896464,0.06599220015236673,0.05332387405678072,0.03916618978286806,0.0,0.0,0.19254565236158575,0.0,0.09120529994701383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108412371986803,0.03961741536633004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0684499108049134,0.0,0.07343764285064218,0.08161644863178193,0.17301590990856705
mentalhealth,heroinoncrack,2020/04/17,"A daydream/night dream I'm not sure if this is normal. But often I have this dream or daydream that I'm in therapy (which I have never been to before), and the therapists tells me I have a bunch of mental health issues that I have symptoms for in real life. Depression, ADHD, and schizophrenia. And immediately 2 men drag me away out of the room and into a psych ward. And I'm crying, and screaming, and fighting. They put me in this coat that I see in movies that doesn't allow me to move my arms and holds them across my body. And they throw me into an isolation room. I give in to everything that already happens to me in real life. I start talking to myself louder, listening to the voices in my head, constantly pacing. I don't know what's wrong with me but I just want to know if anyone else was is/had experiencing/experienced anything similar.",3.843502747252749,5.394108982142856,5.113095238095237,81.42164835164836,72.27380952380952,7.788278388278389,25.42307692307693,8.384062270229773,1.6630598901098903,671,21,129,11,13,223,101,168,0.091,0.868,0.04,-0.7038,0,1,0,0,2,0,22.0,0,0,3,0,2,5,1,0,7,0,9,7,3,1,2,31,20,14,0,4,7,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,2,1,10,13,0,1,2,2,0,3,4,4,0,0,2,4,23,1,23,18,1,20,0,1,1,0,9,14,0,4,3,91,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19000751565373947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17446915378953853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11054838240131938,0.16199387189423534,0.1301042252713701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14854174846764648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13453289917722422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17561534359106956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17085176750861036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736672899744032,0.0,0.0,0.13617275972505347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207368045148035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14209161056486713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15166555388633146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1398088082796624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16225795318581734,0.1680547104555806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16501709527598565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17377711561271675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22334380804641527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15932932438813435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168037082861708,0.0,0.0,0.12193777517878407,0.0,0.0,0.1483677322786541,0.15490609462695584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15893587319552305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3599086874906974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598658279830613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190519469061744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14900897811150776,0.1643281989611879,0.0,0.12707615504591954,0.13818785155657828,0.0,0.180803068910504,0.18356825559099715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932524770051991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1728593861543452,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,decader12,2020/04/17,"How to tell my parents that i might have Asperger and i want to be diagnosed? Hi, i am a 19 M living in Vietnam where mental health care isn’t the best. I am chronically depressed and have some suicidal thought. After some researching, i find that i have some sign of a person with Asperger Syndrome but i don’t want to label myself as one just after reading some article of doing some quiz. So i want to get some professional advice from a doctor. But my parents is very controlling, so everything i do must go through them. I am afraid that if i tell them they are just going to tell it nothing or i am just making up excused for my bad behaviour or just simply blame me playing videogame, Can anyone give me any good advice on what to do?",4.695918367346941,5.625861891156465,5.796061224489797,79.69001020408162,69.54421768707482,8.873197278911565,30.346258503401362,9.120678840339163,2.568690340136054,586,23,112,11,10,195,93,147,0.087,0.809,0.10400000000000001,-0.3204,2,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,3,2,8,7,0,1,4,0,18,4,0,3,1,29,28,11,1,5,9,2,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,5,3,0,1,2,2,0,2,2,3,0,1,1,0,21,4,18,24,7,8,0,1,0,0,12,4,0,10,2,89,26,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3030015359110076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10543075890523053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10840576562011996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12944976590956794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16270220237333508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15807097766298975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17388764442677296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335334986721875,0.1573597130798232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15868736412014012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393376320565366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14170138890068254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100065059296947,0.14872601597697455,0.17622267197699762,0.13003802830475714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16479752265273634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690087818120136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1034886786389667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1562412494949905,0.16447019733881005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1487625814214381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10505736504870276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.344301404635353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13537269102165433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15507937068778424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16958576881456844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4065286037295711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308238994957127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12792210450476532,0.2743352533831537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vanellope-von-yeetz,2020/04/17,"Meds help with motivation, but I have no motivation to take the meds. Kind of funny, honestly. I wish I could give my meds to someone who actually wanted them, because I know there are huge issues with access to medications. I just don't want to take them. 

It feels so pointless. I don't even want to stop being suicidal. I don't want to get better. I don't want to put in the effort. I don't want to take the meds for nothing, so I just don't. All I want is death, and until I die I just want to sleep.

Anyways, I feel really guilty about not taking my meds because my parents think I'm taking them. They didn't work when I was taking them consistently, though, and neither have the other meds I've tried. And my therapist sucks, and I haven't been able to get another therapist. I've made no progress, so I've given up on trying. I don't give a shit anymore.

Just not looking forward to the trouble I'll be in when my parents inevitably find out I haven't been taking my meds. Oops.",2.4061054766734244,4.024326591133008,4.1222312373225165,86.7767748478702,76.19211822660098,6.943958272964357,24.256447406548823,7.724431198458867,1.1417124891335841,770,25,163,11,17,259,102,203,0.20600000000000002,0.647,0.147,-0.8802,2,0,0,0,0,0,27.0,0,0,5,6,14,6,2,0,6,0,20,3,2,3,1,34,49,12,3,10,7,2,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,7,0,1,7,0,0,2,15,3,0,0,6,3,29,3,22,40,2,12,0,0,1,0,11,7,2,0,5,104,32,3,0.08072514536617839,0.0,0.07877609713517586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846473534715246,0.0,0.0,0.08005765270961601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841859870302416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139483101702931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06445245991003162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08377995603328776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053318197177382634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08163411803273381,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378132040537122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843511132926463,0.15487783038037198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054108363325915496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0842560787110906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0840628165788207,0.04436442874831685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06778879096020676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07638408439783666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6276720682433671,0.08132209124040134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07745795414805833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17927144150453692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08115106752776963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05171459520705754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286320166687221,0.0,0.0,0.08078344410073582,0.0,0.06839815370576481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06748983615885806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830020680932517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4248668406294828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18745623132033729,0.0,0.05172541361213991,0.07931204545832046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10961414953185024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38091025802695183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282993326369994,0.0,0.0,0.05876886725841896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rubb3rducki3charli,2020/04/17,"Moms behavior Hey guys, I’m really worried about my mom she’s a sweet smart put together lady she’s 62 but lately she’s been drinking heavily and having fits of rage she kicked me out one night after some rather disgusting comments and jabs just to invite me home the next morning. She started talking to herself tonight loudly mostly gibberish but still dark stuff staying stuff like “it’s all over I hate it stop it it doesn’t matter it’s time for bed” or just “ bullshit bullshit ” over and over, it’s only when she drinks but is this normal with heavy drinking? :(",2.123866317169071,4.9433270550458746,2.8189056356487576,88.71965596330277,85.78899082568806,5.316120576671036,23.382044560943648,6.868970318607317,1.0547530799475755,455,17,82,6,14,142,81,109,0.256,0.667,0.078,-0.9821,0,0,3,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,6,6,3,0,2,0,4,3,0,0,1,18,7,8,0,2,7,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,9,5,3,1,0,3,0,1,1,3,0,1,1,2,11,3,11,6,3,17,0,0,0,0,13,5,0,3,11,53,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5020976786447208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16916627495351996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16867692380438334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17137436698359507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1927238651605504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346765076598597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40018997532536776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18169867266463907,0.16032917423158696,0.1673946609114082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11577095402287778,0.12993752149335638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17174932118902894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944953520590682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092701816911815,0.18210112213507335,0.13643934821727022,0.1428364887926599,0.0,0.0,0.3911599254690032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1373210649656107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0996227804578914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17350432871716587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Shadow-Heart94,2020/04/17,"A (26M) that struggles with self worth. So I am twenty six years of age, and I'm making this post in an attempt to reach out on the internet since I feel utterly alone right now.

I will try to include as much relevant information as I can because I want an actual solution, not just to complain about my life.

For as long as I can remember ice always had this feeling of being ""overlooked"" by friends, and family.
I already know theres nothing ""special"" about me, and I'd rather not entertain any falsehoods.

Within my childhood I was the middle kid growing up. My two siblings and I are four years apart, so i always felt like I couldn't be around my older brother because of the route he chose, and my younger brother because I didn't know how to connect with him. 

There were various factors that contributed to me feeling this way at an early age. I was the quiet nerd who felt like I was always an inconvenience to others due to me being viewed as a tag along with most.

I stuck to video games and virtual worlds because I could be someone else, even if it wasn't real I felt like I mattered. (I.G. World of Warcraft guild) 

When I was growing up I was surrounded by black people (I myself am black) but I always felt like an outsider among my own race because they chose to focus on getting women, and running the streets while I was focused on school.

Then abruptly one summer between my freshman and sophomore year of high school, (I think this was in some way connected to my brother) the house we lived at was robbed. As a result my little brothers dad was shot with a shotgun and he thought my mother put a hit on him, and kicked us out.

Thankfully my aunt immediately moved us in so we weren't homeless. (Shes my role model, this is important later.)

So now when I moved I was then surrounded by caucasian people and it was difficult for me to adjust mainly because of my own insecurities I think.

But this was also the first time I actually had friends thanks to one person I knew. Eventually we ended up spending almost every day together and thought of each other as family.

I had more than my fair share of endless racist jokes and people poking fun at me because it was easy for them to do so. But they were my friends.. so I let it slide because they made me feel like I belonged (for the most part. )

Within my family life things were kind of like a dictatorship. 

What I mean by that is in my household you dont question or disobey your parent(s) ever.

Doing so gives them the ""right"" to traumatize you, or incite a situation where you end up losing your composure only to call everyone else in the family and tell them what you did, without mentioning what they did to cause that reaction out of you.

This has happened from about the age of eight to now, it still happens. 

Because of this, I have a plethora of oent up emotions and things that I cannot let go of because I feel like that was utterly wrong and the same way they (family) holds me to a higher standard, I do the same to them. Now the only thing g that has remained consistent with my family and ""friends"" is that they only want to speak to me when they want something and guilt teup me about how much they ""need"" it to get done when I refuse.

It makes me feel like I'm nothing more than a tool to be used until they are satisfied and it has driven me to suicidal thoughts, a few attempts and being hauled off to the psychiatric unit from my job because I couldn't take it anymore. It now leads me to believe that I have no other purpose than to serve other people and neglect myself in the process.

When that happened I was diagnosed with depression, bipolar disorder, anxiety, and PTSD. 

I jumped around a lot and I apologize because its difficult to keep track as I reread this.

Does anyone have potential tools, techniques, or anything to help me that doesn't involve the following;
Weed, Hydrocodone, Xanax, Cocaine, Codeine, Liquor, Beer, etc.? 

I've used all of those substances and nothing helps. 

I've also tried therapy for a brief moment, but I couldn't afford the sessions to continue.

Thanks taking time out to help, or just read.

Have a great day.",6.304956195244057,6.471225603254068,6.5025782227784745,78.72117647058825,65.80851063829788,9.403254067584482,33.64580725907384,9.138037386147262,2.876911889862328,3263,133,613,52,47,1047,363,799,0.084,0.799,0.11699999999999999,0.9587,3,1,3,1,0,1,98.0,5,7,13,6,36,33,0,3,37,0,63,7,0,10,2,113,110,61,1,10,15,7,10,8,4,1,5,2,0,4,43,41,2,4,23,7,2,13,13,11,0,7,38,15,107,22,110,58,19,96,0,3,3,0,63,40,0,11,47,454,150,6,0.0,0.0,0.10705548305068133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05492645933237534,0.056810237780092615,0.0605306613501021,0.08773041637526142,0.1825653803698156,0.0,0.0,0.037301312049849385,0.0,0.041961709840604065,0.0,0.054398548509104784,0.038353866873268964,0.0,0.045138608338862234,0.0976600047342188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40124800574635205,0.0,0.0,0.061799538212030825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056010131574045566,0.0,0.0,0.05634822107596753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04379494212332626,0.0,0.0,0.07075013926109973,0.0,0.04724403726958568,0.05567373148609714,0.0,0.0,0.06286526397278168,0.0,0.04800144632970127,0.05613274719412175,0.06428625801033493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09164378975912156,0.06170123472241625,0.09716536732050064,0.0,0.06117459606740273,0.036229297729878124,0.04961686890378381,0.04621526383157402,0.05241353652866038,0.0,0.0,0.3102580947200504,0.0,0.16640923307766145,0.117559063342127,0.21066648928993803,0.0,0.0,0.04665717210531285,0.0,0.0,0.1695143996217397,0.0,0.05731592137594441,0.05261913685810324,0.031173715080533886,0.0,0.0,0.0604746389065108,0.0,0.0,0.14551660469356334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029862833261173,0.05795426004198799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329196406114213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05443224994297116,0.04875507082213218,0.0,0.05712002601502316,0.06029056430364613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11217998648340703,0.07748732722007623,0.2143837407534376,0.05497621891964432,0.04843541325094326,0.04854238642782607,0.0,0.06136547436161584,0.0,0.046633297754884215,0.0,0.05190238758948997,0.07322841143557711,0.0,0.0,0.05975002229566974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659821276179065,0.08064521641017354,0.04067214049210085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.157896221042953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433841124750144,0.1251524917123691,0.0,0.0,0.06090677078901122,0.05939948392436406,0.0,0.1521101710715589,0.047894741944952995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052533153632569295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0641191748823261,0.0551415153213051,0.06144691058497384,0.0,0.05486694830413785,0.062433703626885564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06213674167147752,0.09368679515034248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102651642857952,0.0,0.0,0.0572227078405976,0.0,0.0,0.04537422770616362,0.06165606372239121,0.0,0.0,0.04647601017971563,0.04222782991060065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04380496154550202,0.0,0.0,0.0573433293398429,0.0,0.059999299516111174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248391237937004,0.0,0.0479431570772654,0.1515013447588944,0.06272816195625476,0.0,0.10932390279900588,0.07029402752388036,0.0,0.13063933190911803,0.06396940653900808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07448195679957029,0.0,0.053582535818572974,0.0,0.1319606560138187,0.0947492135975567,0.0,0.0,0.09705957729013218,0.13061714229906976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05287547138008393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05997216549303053,0.0,0.10596887079151167
mentalhealth,9enis8oy,2020/04/17,I’m a fuck up I feel like such a fuck up. I dropped out of school. I’m addicted to morphine. I just had a break up with the girl of my dreams. I know that death isn’t supposed to be an option but I really really want to hang myself or cut open my rist. No one has asked me if I’m ok I only get people who tell me to kill myself. Just because I’m a damaged kid doesn’t mean I don’t have feelings. No one sees that so I’ve started to believe that my feelings aren’t real. I feel like nothin is real. People shun me cause I’m different. I have strong urges to go out in public and just let loose with an assault rifle. I keep telling myself that these feelings aren’t normal and I need to stop but the voices won’t shut up. Why can’t I just be normal. I want people to like me. To ask how I’m doing every now and then but no one cares for me. I just want to fucking die. Why do I have to exist. Wish my mom didn’t miss the bus to the abortion clinic.,-0.9835211267605644,0.9333224413145552,1.748762441314554,97.69987605633806,89.84507042253522,4.159173708920188,16.031737089201876,5.414198509911553,-0.8301273615023477,732,16,177,4,25,253,112,213,0.20199999999999999,0.6609999999999999,0.13699999999999998,-0.9533,3,1,0,1,0,2,18.0,0,0,0,1,9,14,6,0,10,1,19,5,0,2,0,39,49,11,3,8,10,1,5,3,0,1,2,1,0,2,6,8,0,2,7,1,0,2,11,8,0,3,2,7,27,6,24,43,0,17,0,2,1,3,9,9,3,3,7,110,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033170932085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235340500825192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287912196730978,0.0,0.0,0.13469662707483135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12189346023413762,0.1228150814745438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407836962991045,0.12490867829046767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10072955781851796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3022509425659277,0.17081906836620256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3315777547477159,0.062462127633851776,0.0,0.06794539888523443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1062652534717043,0.1322689930987369,0.0,0.06570385387247457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12225225496647407,0.0,0.1752244087170513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022955678503625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14002041740593882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886479138631031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342754365427025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430390310390097,0.0909263455757514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2486514573557841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721576742362781,0.15317894549414635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12099521866561999,0.09526920730483764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08462106801115639,0.0,0.0,0.0999526525635044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20899125580745234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2115484688807044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21575811433866002,0.0,0.13748141342586565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,obsess_much_00,2020/04/17,"A mentally ill love story Ok. Where to start? I guess I am half venting, half looking for advice or options. This is extremely difficult to write.  
I guess I've never really connected with anybody on an emotional level, all of my relationships have been short, with me being there purely to have fun, not for love or to build a relationship. I've never wanted kids or a family. I stopped establishing relationships for a long time because I couldn't lead people on and older women seemed more leary of my 'style' of doing things.   
So one day, after a long and brutal run-up to the event, I ended up being admitted to the hospital, in the psych ward, with an initial diagnosis related to psychosis. Now I've been through a few things, but this was the most terrifying experience of my life. From my perspective, it was a horrible nightmare, with my deepest darkest fears coming to life. Without getting into details as to why, I'll just say that being locked in a cage like that, confused, scared, and alone, seemed to me a far worse fate than death.  
Shortly after arriving, I started going around in a very confused state, kind of testing things, opening doors, making noise and randomly stirring things up, while the kindly nurses kept a close eye on me to prevent problems.  
At one point, I ended up back in my assigned room, just sitting there. I have no memory of how I got there, or probably a portion of what went on after my arrival, but I was still completely freaking out inside. All of a sudden, in walks this one nurse. This one nurse... I don't know how to describe what happened next, or the order in which events took place, but it was amazing. I know I quickly made it very clear that she was very, very attractive. The conversation almost immediately became sexual in nature, but we ended up talking for what seems like hours and hours on a number of topics. She maintained eye contact almost the entire time, being very much in control and very sexy. She seemed to enjoy teasing me as I explained just how beautiful she really was. There was no clock, and she would not tell me what time it was or how long we had been there. I told her about things I've never told anybody and completely opened up to her. I could go on and on about details, but in short, I for the first time, fell completely and totally, flat on my face in love with this girl. A freakin psych nurse of all people. She was away from work for most of my stay, so I only saw her briefly in a public area before leaving.  
So now here I sit, pondering my dilemma. I've been back to the ward, and that is really what I want to do now. Obviously this has become an obsession. Last time I told the admitting nurse about her, and they still admitted me. She was nice to me, and was even my assigned nurse the last time I was there. I couldn't bring myself to talk about my obsession, to her or anybody else, it was just so nice talking to her, to hear her voice, to get lost in her eyes. I'm pretty confident a relationship cannot happen, even if she wanted it to, because of me being a patient.  
I've been doing well for a while, no more medication, and stopped going to the doctor months ago, even went on a date, but it seems like I'm slipping back.  
I can't afford therapy or counselling, and I'm not sure I want to talk about things with anybody but her. The only real option I think have right now is to check myself in and go see her, but it makes me feel like a stalker. I am also very fearful of covid-19 due to a pre-existing condition. It feels like I've been through the worst possible breakup, and somehow have to get over it, plus my mental health issues on my own. I'm not really even attracted to other women the same way anymore. Would I be taking advantage of the system by going back? Its not like its all fun and games in the psych ward, but I don't know, that's kind of why i'm trying to talk this through here I guess. Going back would mean a huge hit to the progress I've made since being out, and I don't think the benefits will outweigh the risks. I kind of wish we had never met.  
  
The devil bent my ear today  
About his magical elixir  
That would  
Make the sorrow go away  
Help me forget I'd ever met you  
Give me  
A baker's dozen please  
Wrap me up to go away",5.500758372478906,5.751892367103701,6.0997798499614415,80.63117623688332,67.52205005959476,9.05953399238122,29.44263712636425,8.897581704614359,2.1992511206151097,3332,109,657,52,51,1086,351,839,0.11699999999999999,0.746,0.13699999999999998,0.9583,1,1,0,0,0,0,106.0,3,1,1,7,48,43,2,8,50,1,55,14,5,11,14,142,128,51,1,14,28,0,2,6,0,5,6,4,2,4,38,37,0,5,18,1,1,16,20,17,1,8,35,12,86,26,120,77,15,133,1,2,6,3,60,55,0,27,61,463,124,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04901754009203562,0.044465417893846296,0.0,0.10045961353072948,0.05195250705531087,0.0,0.040114381261208816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04974703654925152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04465464574022703,0.0,0.0,0.14138601490574573,0.19285667758113567,0.0,0.06115634747079439,0.055399778031162014,0.04268400564062555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043209957606349936,0.15778110996342673,0.0,0.056260735158137065,0.040050123508659774,0.0,0.0,0.032350217608264675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051342737979671364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04190375555605029,0.05642528455251428,0.13328542429598206,0.0,0.0,0.1325256094302081,0.04537422888044213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04906787538760425,0.047288090095382485,0.11289196392165388,0.0507266365674063,0.07167121404348673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04266760988336366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786224259751868,0.048119778858290864,0.2280649004048647,0.0,0.04011898175271413,0.0,0.16577666672142238,0.0,0.0887158456810917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053319658261212086,0.05653600541666319,0.0,0.03362240381638351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879855686631207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05235589709756483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20894322365148835,0.08270285664386308,0.08177714016672402,0.0,0.0531141138999798,0.0,0.0,0.07086153959927377,0.14703915930369232,0.0,0.0,0.13317486980790186,0.042123286748849666,0.0,0.05475754105489012,0.0,0.13581897567187393,0.09492863479530612,0.10045019288114547,0.0,0.0,0.054640916429301085,0.0,0.05053274619319297,0.1011026124091962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04003867809772653,0.0,0.03687470197488569,0.0,0.15475152071702908,0.0,0.053347653911473454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359637623685413,0.07630063362693182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06955176605992744,0.0,0.05240841495782565,0.05506260397120041,0.04741912409376398,0.05654990372188407,0.0,0.051032594173567376,0.0540829151682622,0.04799807758244326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057095121494132775,0.12853975957684952,0.0,0.0,0.2154200452355398,0.0,0.042837911582753616,0.0,0.03989068458720756,0.05022072251733017,0.0,0.03997246802599525,0.2283271389763267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04149436751450795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07100957446991916,0.05346581512173838,0.0801185723798463,0.08387503836205873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04727691219853095,0.0,0.03771543833724718,0.2015908135460488,0.043843632831674584,0.0,0.05736440127594367,0.0,0.19995166552426333,0.06428332468906378,0.0,0.0,0.17549852849092135,0.0,0.04754753052718375,0.14379527701536315,0.055731616501169916,0.03405657622048354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897212258120753,0.11834694052787005,0.039816109865646265,0.0,0.0,0.045101491299319285,0.09300100067049387,0.0905264625447679,0.0,0.057683605834463525,0.04835419472384789,0.0,0.036518395037973904,0.0,0.05111916974051151,0.14253404218667293,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,OrangeGuppyEatsToes,2020/04/17,"Supporting Mental Health! Hey Everyone!! Because of this whole quarantine and Virus, i know that the depression and anxiety rates are going to go up. I would like to help anyway that i can! I know its not much, but if you have a public instagram account, please comment the username so i can hype you up! Please stay safe, and take time to care for your mental health.",4.047391304347826,6.253591057971017,4.286304347826088,84.81467391304352,73.20289855072464,8.078260869565218,25.99275362318841,8.841846274778883,2.050988405797102,289,10,54,6,6,90,52,69,0.047,0.688,0.265,0.9522,0,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,3,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,5,2,0,0,0,10,12,6,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,8,4,7,11,2,6,0,1,0,0,7,2,0,1,2,37,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1504293349956255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11987013657217975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2004879495128336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16936605147808756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18789828809944906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2235104931005504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4180390086772737,0.0,0.0,0.13180388640049426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21613679540609315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09606854581807346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3963344594142774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14455328823876729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4317041243314727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095924568957076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231451470063932,0.0,0.0,0.14784907638653388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11466257359723067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21954193633210714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13968766783579284,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,GHOSTindaknud,2020/04/17,"I have irrational fears that make it very hard for me to function around people sometimes lol Alright, I've have insomnia my whole life. Since I could remember I had a very hard time falling asleep And staying asleep. I would usually wake up in a panic, and be extremely terrified of either a sound or a feeling that had just jolted me awake. It's hard to explain, but I'd wake up in absolute terror and pain, and my hands and feet would be vibrating. I would often see things, either figures that looked like plants, or swirling air, even objects that weren't normally there. As I got older it just got way worse. And since my family is pretty fucked up as it is, this was normal for us. Like literally, we had haunted houses, everyone in my damn house would deal with really fucking weird shit like cups falling, lights clicking, disembodied voices and whistling and random shadow cats. So insomnia related hallucinations, completely normal for my house hold. Didn't make it any easier. So my insomnia got to the point I was terrified of sleeping, and of a specific lamp that was in my room. I was convinced the lamp was fucking with me, it would click on its own. If it was plugged in, it would turn on. Sometimes it clicked randomly, just to get your attention. Then it would click endlessly until you left the room. Which was my fucking bedroom. Family said it's just a lamp, my dad wanted the lamp safe because it was a super old lamp and was his grandma's so I wasn't allowed to move it somewhere else. So I baracaded in the corner with all my stuff. My room was a mess lol my sense of reality was so warped I couldn't tell when I was dreaming or when I was awake and I stayed up days at a time. What didn't help was the knocking on my door. It was never anyone, no one else heard it, and it would be endless. When I was awake, or asleep. My dad knew I was struggling really bad with everything so he got me animals to take care of just so I felt like I had something I needed to do. Which honestly, helped tremendously. When I had to move and sell my farm animals, I was extremely depressed. I hallucinated about people being in my room, I was obsesses with locking my door, sounds terrified me if they were too loud and it was almost painful when dogs barked or the TV was slightly too loud. Balloons cause me to panic, once I hallucinated one and it said something really fucked up on it and a heard a roar in my ear and it freaked me out. Didn't sleep for 2 days after that. A lot of shit has gone on, and I haven't had nearly as bad of sleeping issues for a couple of years. It will still happen. I'm still paranoid about sleeping, being around table lamps, and I am extremely suspicious of balloons. I watch shows on my phone with headphones as being around multiple people just makes it unbearable if it's too loud. I'm usually fine in stores but I tend to freak out if too many people are close to me or crowding a small area. Knocking or anyone messing with my door is the quickest way to terrify me. I tend to break down in my room when I get home a lot when I've been around people, or when noises have just gotten to be too much for me. I try to not flip out in public or at family as much as I used to. I draw the things I've seen. I've made characters inspired by them, and I'll never fully Express exactly what I've seen or felt, or the intensity of the hallucinations I would have Because they're just so bizarre and unbelievable. When I did actually try to explain to my Drs they would say it was for attention, or they just didn't think it was serious.",4.3640563380281705,5.452796166197188,5.287999999999999,82.44200000000002,70.43661971830986,8.778591549295774,28.42535211267605,9.120678840339163,2.23642309859155,2818,101,566,55,50,923,292,710,0.172,0.748,0.08,-0.9974,1,0,2,0,0,0,72.0,2,2,4,1,42,37,8,6,26,3,70,26,14,7,4,115,113,64,0,21,30,2,7,4,0,11,7,12,10,0,40,37,0,2,12,3,2,5,12,25,0,2,54,29,76,12,86,39,9,80,0,1,9,5,27,45,8,22,29,389,116,0,0.0,0.0,0.057480775372046176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05898278875396664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040056021007442384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237261440772904,0.0,0.0,0.2097444291499975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09836299380796562,0.0718133744906485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060055475913126065,0.06050954787152255,0.0,0.0,0.061758614905099575,0.0,0.0,0.047029206891363584,0.06517498591403091,0.0,0.07597505044151733,0.06072634766103055,0.050733018367233436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841170098486733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038904838226963716,0.0,0.0,0.05628428612539505,0.05293816695183641,0.0,0.16658535688003456,0.06628218670156955,0.02978309774145553,0.0,0.1131121247060258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27227410758720644,0.061548713021879226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18844025714040766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052087677834204565,0.0,0.1582964012353998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07896280194610499,0.0,0.059084454333112976,0.0,0.0,0.2038982627726872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061479368872655815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06399821975655115,0.0,0.04160489050344904,0.11510801029998158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04946363691057136,0.0,0.0,0.10015435124746504,0.0,0.05573538874028485,0.11795451522798195,0.059718338869632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12520901285120833,0.0866008809116057,0.043675785768394114,0.09085916155764986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1731371331485145,0.0,0.0,0.0618087299818391,0.06272971175345303,0.07982831699352604,0.0,0.12535376832190245,0.1382198241779635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20417942000758046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0556823201089673,0.0,0.0,0.059925468870845176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320420046142975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672555180902208,0.0,0.11206037458117717,0.04684198434704632,0.0,0.0,0.04693801926344805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12092604875940738,0.0974502460270377,0.0,0.23578192741215084,0.0,0.0,0.0906927262900155,0.11651303325026018,0.0,0.0,0.1255653995889399,0.09407993249952824,0.0,0.0,0.0615781450691011,0.06742977716010924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04428768246313503,0.0,0.05148376830508318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826499581355881,0.03774262738307156,0.0,0.0,0.0686935593240205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0799824634117944,0.06406948741731115,0.0,0.0,0.07085298772307852,0.050873230480879314,0.12974653961312818,0.09720219333648199,0.034742481816826695,0.09350882865946007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576303214907159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06002713098553684,0.4184296059417884,0.0,0.0,0.03793156398794716
mentalhealth,freekekistan2,2020/04/17,"I'm a fucking failure The more I look around me, the more I see how everyone else is ahead, smarter and has much more talents and skills than I do. I can't even fucking play video games good. I'm a shitty human being who thinks he's depressed but is probably just looking for attention. Nothing is fun anymore. I just play video games just to play them. I lash out at people and don't know how to express my own emotions. I cam keep my feelings hidden, but now nobody will believe me because of how I've created this mask. My brown parents always ask me if I'm alright but if I say something is wrong I'm ungrateful. I don't even know why I'm living anymore. I was already feeling either nothing or guilt for the past year, with some random moments of happiness, and this quarantine made it worse. I've gone as far as writing a suicide note and now I feel even worse about myself. I'm sorry about this jumbled rant. I just don't know what to do. I can't schedule an appointment with a psychiatrist because of how free America is. Nor do I even trust myself because of how i always go from fine to feeling depressed and suicidal. I don't even know why I'm posting this when ranting won't make me happy. The world is probably gonna end soon anyway so who the fuck cares if I died. I'm nothing more than a shitty burden to everyone around me anyways..",2.919587432561092,4.677054138686135,4.215211044112984,86.06004919073312,75.13138686131387,6.66302761028245,29.06632814979372,7.423996415210882,1.7535032053316413,1070,47,210,13,23,352,145,274,0.263,0.634,0.10300000000000001,-0.9953,1,1,1,0,0,2,24.0,0,0,1,2,25,21,3,1,11,1,20,3,0,7,0,44,51,23,3,3,12,1,4,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,8,11,0,1,10,7,1,2,8,8,0,0,3,9,28,14,25,44,8,19,0,2,4,3,12,6,3,6,10,135,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1096831878370048,0.0,0.16540669192277818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19714326858827533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17696255756187984,0.09291949605433633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18176804697767635,0.0,0.0,0.11198242686867484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10133828732664374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1712149346608677,0.0,0.10315475045523333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08303050703598293,0.11180429829918732,0.08803313062635207,0.0,0.0,0.3282423138519278,0.0,0.0,0.18994947829906936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20102534002175595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2756630398152974,0.0,0.0,0.05648761091472364,0.08336654375500283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21161243672821087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08834550080430231,0.0,0.0,0.21849625105094547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776627268020425,0.0,0.16693099749022847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940485235117533,0.06634592640610829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306565154238187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28611220305753743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11036470826508238,0.0,0.09488233285287513,0.0689069311875798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09519148856188088,0.0,0.21432598624237129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790416926439446,0.0,0.0,0.07920374304490699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651796456087602,0.0,0.11126287463709236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2174406917793649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06368733508566192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17937433018890184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025809155523441,0.0,0.10867117830941904,0.0,0.06400614884344649
mentalhealth,Lasagna24,2020/04/17,"I’m scared to get help For the past 4 years I’ve felt terrible. I have no motivation and I don’t enjoy anything I used to like.  For example drawing or even playing video games are things I used to love doing but now it just feels like a chore. For the past few years the only thing I looked forward for was sleep and I would go through everyday just waiting for night so I can sleep. Only recently I’ve not even been able to get to sleep, all I think about now is how easy it would be if I could just die. 

I’ve been very stressed out lately because I’m failing two courses and if I don’t pass I can’t go on to university next year. But I’m to scared to reach out for help. I’m terrified my parents will find out how I’ve been feeling because there not that excepting and will probably be really disappointed. 

I don’t know where my life is going and I feel like I’m trapped. I feel like my only way out is to die and I would go through with is if I wasn’t scared of surviving  and everyone’s idea of me changing.",1.6011714770797951,3.2312825345622147,3.274348775163716,91.92926752364781,78.49308755760369,6.964734416686878,24.324278438030557,7.85451343220497,1.0795769585253452,798,28,185,13,19,265,113,217,0.195,0.6609999999999999,0.14300000000000002,-0.9658,1,1,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,3,13,14,0,4,4,0,25,5,3,5,1,44,48,16,2,7,12,1,5,4,0,5,1,0,1,0,5,12,0,1,10,3,0,6,8,7,0,1,6,6,20,7,27,34,2,25,0,2,1,1,5,7,0,4,17,112,25,2,0.10614324025310562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08734684273811168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12940786814471147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11228547409638566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08474674038803795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22031985105254884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14021321825287167,0.0,0.0,0.10142441473047346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21467684607798065,0.22748625613572265,0.10191415612583177,0.0,0.09701299864440772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11091092426312896,0.0,0.24129459803108574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14229115307635568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198227984461481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058333548957563285,0.0,0.11973419827962505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497210961931046,0.20742490274203507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913358895444518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957984184372096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1128845401779843,0.09960824063725184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24218015163022805,0.0,0.0,0.11785950709547452,0.0,0.2026514663591362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11444036546359135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06799807765914061,0.0,0.10480364453402538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31880370099400185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.318659686895414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12158672308935815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410337047997416,0.06801230247799481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368652251125432,0.0,0.0,0.1833473597044916,0.0,0.08757928942819844,0.0,0.08425156355175584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2262033374324013,0.0,0.0,0.20505830004050932
mentalhealth,bigt1ttiewh0re,2020/04/17,"Idk what’s wrong with me i’ve been trying to figure out what’s wrong with me for a long time i’m constantly having either panic attacks or anxiety attacks at night or when i leave my house but i really don’t know what’s causing these.

i’ve also had a past of feeling out of touch with reality since i was very young hearing voices seeing things that aren’t real ect and it’s honestly messing with me as i get older because most of the time i feel like i’m in a VCR headset yk 

ik it sounds so weird, but hopefully someone can maybe understand what’s going on in my head.

thank youuu :~)",2.546451612903226,4.004820741935486,4.4718064516129035,85.08770967741938,75.45161290322581,7.218064516129032,24.49677419354839,7.908726449838941,1.3279574193548391,468,15,96,7,10,160,88,124,0.135,0.735,0.131,0.674,1,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,11,2,1,4,0,7,1,1,1,0,21,19,9,0,1,5,0,3,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,9,7,0,0,5,1,0,1,2,7,0,0,3,7,10,4,16,16,2,16,0,0,1,0,1,6,0,4,10,56,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367564107185853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278748852489382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3803311453452288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10189754517885616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17171660381433634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18063766927568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1690395177333686,0.11941721625064855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733279574077225,0.0,0.09499935188172448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17155162578842695,0.0,0.18839843791938812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1660249264183145,0.0,0.1928770937181134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09186528648627984,0.0,0.0,0.1769954565498776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08166461862558752,0.0,0.0,0.14792895994341387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16793198619005606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1568658126594065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19612308819468768,0.0,0.0,0.15957056742330253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19026161510770506,0.10708525361996407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13320273479492434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13827425486771674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14163184701326906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15389599351166128,0.0,0.0,0.1110518897545136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19494154436726305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11348884155389215,0.0,0.0,0.17401665568460126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13792228755770092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3655205571785733,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mere_human,2020/04/17,"Living with bipolar II is a rollercoaster — even when things are good. Most people just don't understand. I try every day to be better. I try my best to be reliable and socially adept. I try with every ounce of my being to be content/happy.

My rollercoaster is one of false hope and disappointment — hypomania and depression.

So much stigma though, but who am I to blame others? Those who have not suffered as I have could not possibly understand. I wish I were so blissfully unaware of the horrors of manic depression.

For 6 long years, every single day, suicide was on my mind. Recently, things have improved drastically. Life is very difficult, but now worth living. Even still, when suicide is rarely on my mind, I understand why the suicide rate is so much higher for people like me. Life can be okay for awhile, but eventually you will remember that longing for an escape.

It's one thing to wake up without motivation and even to be anhedonic, but to be lonely on top of that is hell.

Maybe one day I will be happy and without relapse. I am still so young. Hope is the one constant I've had — the only reason I'm around.

Stay strong everyone.",3.748906976744188,6.169613227906978,4.9029651162790735,79.05770348837211,74.86046511627906,8.206976744186047,27.02906976744186,8.982922981607832,2.4903069767441863,904,35,160,21,20,297,124,215,0.21899999999999997,0.626,0.156,-0.9719,0,2,0,0,0,3,29.0,0,1,0,5,15,16,1,0,6,1,29,4,1,2,0,30,36,17,3,4,9,0,0,1,0,2,3,0,0,0,10,8,0,0,6,0,1,0,5,7,0,4,3,0,17,9,26,22,5,21,1,5,0,0,4,6,1,3,15,122,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08769190615613892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10337677326013094,0.08712122923003332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10645081859578837,0.0,0.07864963687528091,0.0,0.0,0.1905861439235905,0.0,0.16968746597776938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19518836919642932,0.0,0.24898859609493196,0.09412743607971956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082622801481257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097245677131819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19567889018278609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13915648366730152,0.048125429971859535,0.0,0.1739665577528809,0.17435077570633933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09896328639551864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989275045510689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448276143059522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.267002935363497,0.07491883423049216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1365843764118478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11105157745884596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012813614598644,0.0972635472239424,0.0,0.11158896283760332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041524242287862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10499510553710012,0.1573352607334241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232512402750692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19633055417033332,0.0,0.0967823971938392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20063888335154784,0.0,0.0,0.30764705149051513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127839819896121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08888703433349253,0.0,0.11327791914440492,0.18991401390335064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06343512746568089
mentalhealth,nosoupy,2020/04/17,"Need advice for constantly looking back and regretting my past Lately I’ve been finding myself thinking about things I said, did, or even thought about doing at random points in my life that I regret or wish didn’t happen. It’s been causing me a lot of anxiety and pushed me towards anxiety attacks but they come so suddenly and strongly I can’t stop them.",7.087500000000002,7.448134514705885,7.004705882352942,75.12117647058824,64.14705882352942,9.741176470588236,36.117647058823536,9.516144504307137,3.5134294117647054,289,13,49,5,4,92,55,68,0.16399999999999998,0.764,0.07200000000000001,-0.5113,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,2,1,6,4,1,0,1,0,6,1,0,1,0,18,14,7,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,6,2,10,1,7,8,1,12,0,2,1,0,3,4,0,4,6,37,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176239389611018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3407361633409886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25335814576047344,0.0,0.17124576121671714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22877853087311914,0.0,0.19183992421855495,0.0,0.24066409234320174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14709400493818575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20354757817387814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1969365634131585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25122000582355464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15730254251322265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1870154146262862,0.0,0.0,0.1893351226784572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16513232133279312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21259633125032315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21052742646803946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118426658897464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18619065945162075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14795475582658876,0.1426998407313236,0.0,0.17680223591631603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25609880650080225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bartholomew_blue,2020/04/17,"I dont know why, but I often find myself scared to sleep. It's hard to find an accurate way to describe it. Its not fear of sleeping itself, but of it suddenly being the next day as soon as I do. I'm not sure if it's due to some sort of anxiety or somthing else, or if I'm just screwing myself over by overthinking things.

If started a few months ago, getting really bad around january. It was making me even more exhausted than usual, and the more exhausted I was the more I was scared to sleep. Up until a few days ago i hadn't felt that way since the quarantine started. But now that schoolwork is picking up again it's back. 

I just dont know why. I feel like my brain is broken. I cant tell if it's the schedule of meetings or the idea of doing work or somthing else entirely. It's almost midnight and I'm so tired but cant sleep and I dont know what to do. I dont understand.",1.6465674603174598,3.129465095238096,3.5639649470899464,90.55007440476193,77.94179894179894,7.053042328042327,23.98181216931217,7.865858978985527,1.105552645502646,689,23,156,11,16,233,101,189,0.19899999999999998,0.7659999999999999,0.035,-0.9858,0,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,1,10,9,1,3,9,0,16,9,5,2,1,36,29,19,0,4,16,0,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,14,4,0,0,9,0,0,0,9,7,0,0,5,3,15,2,20,23,6,23,0,0,0,1,2,4,1,12,18,106,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1935612212354699,0.0,0.10932701412068817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08352164876514981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09719247195596248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08395192444865347,0.09115991834375092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12187989005164293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082286693982685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5118279767302922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824101174342994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07211171068808289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285674710464167,0.05520419119075595,0.07799751118276314,0.10482897736947952,0.0,0.19957528622193588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057041529909016425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09780295381479863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12324982028159293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18000579652556845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05333935260319516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287784128417331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714564931956194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11611312262715792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06994287364060718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21861448384425008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0903140106506578,0.0,0.4370314570088505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15455493960072247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289993094449436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09542727265667884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07253368722659041,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254852185526943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136592065524138,0.0,0.0,0.12024526194890155,0.0,0.0,0.17332244282149667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19703416131300186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948362430759691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LE_DUDE__,2020/04/17,"My friend needs help. Now For the past several months, a buddy who I know through friends, and have only hung out with a handful of times several years ago, is completely losing it on Facebook.  He is making posts that don't make sense, rambling off, and then he will comment on his own posts, and I'm talking 500-600 comments from himself of more ramblings, photos, emojis, etc.  All random. He's disorganized, though processes are detached. He has also posted videos of himself driving across the country and although I can't prove it I'm suspicious there might be open containers in the car. 

I'm a physician resident, although not in psych, but I believe he is likely suffering from schizophrenia or schizoaffective disorder, but how can I help him when he is in another state? I've tried reaching out to family or past friends and have had no luck. I KNOW he needs mental help and I dont feel he is safe to others or himself right now.  What are my options? Who could I contact? I think hes either in Wyoming, Colorado, or Idaho?",5.292131868131868,6.740202143589747,5.454450549450551,80.76519230769233,68.58974358974359,8.238095238095239,33.415750915750905,8.634040054169528,2.8230366300366305,818,38,146,13,14,258,129,195,0.084,0.777,0.139,0.9219,0,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,1,7,8,0,0,6,0,20,2,1,3,2,36,31,19,0,3,8,0,2,1,3,2,1,0,0,0,7,10,0,2,5,1,0,2,5,2,0,0,1,2,16,6,20,26,5,28,0,2,0,0,26,12,0,8,11,97,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408940276425068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194698821552604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14678783420617292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15771661555451155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14677296522572267,0.0,0.0,0.11176766445080127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16043642002162906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16406289324149548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1561217207896032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196661890835784,0.0,0.07078127603473823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3244591889712261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2814895849422047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15386561173351268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839023194951169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1566088551504268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18688387564365566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14107325856819308,0.14850333539276786,0.0,0.0,0.1117357238040162,0.0,0.0,0.20759612551677534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1064658841158692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2672655135617207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4022045197283241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1195475296479184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3162893319402322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11251568000736388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08969756437924177,0.13753582246614224,0.0,0.081627133391742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09504150424233034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014658328583294
mentalhealth,liammccl,2020/04/17,"Has anyone tried Yoga Nidra for getting a sound sleep? Here's a method that I use which puts me to sleep immediately: [video link](https://youtu.be/QA_yAPNNrog). It works insanely well, but yoga nidra wasn't originally designed to put you to sleep...",8.222857142857139,10.36510223809524,6.446190476190478,73.78214285714287,62.33333333333333,9.40952380952381,30.66666666666667,9.725611199111238,2.9788952380952387,202,7,32,4,3,59,35,42,0.0,0.958,0.042,0.1406,0,0,1,0,0,0,16.0,0,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,2,3,3,2,0,3,4,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,1,1,3,1,4,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,17,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17285854864635736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291596883322295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4970389212694932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7421809189113392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16784282788559754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21351447563260284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22227606769768074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17997553991732082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gothpoison,2020/04/17,"do i have an eating disorder? hi. im a 14 year old girl and for a while now i have been struggling with my body image. i don't really think i'm fat, but i really want to be skinny. i don't have a toned body, or an hourglass figure, and i know i shouldn't be worrying about that at this age but i often compare myself to my friends with perfect bodies. 

i purposely starve myself sometimes so i could be skinnier. the most i went was for two days, and now and then i'll set a timer to fast for 24 hours. on days where i don't fast, i try my best to eat under 500 calories, but i often give up and binge. i try to purge, but it's hard, and i have a fear of someone in my house hearing me.

i don't own a scale, so i don't know for sure, but just looking at myself i don't see i lost weight. my arms, especially upper arms, are still flabby and my stomach isn't flat and i just see myself as a fat, ugly, mess.

one of the worst parts is that i can't eat properly anymore. whenever i think ""oh, whatever, fuck this."" and eat just a small thing, i feel disgusting. i automatically beat myself up, to the point where i'm in tears and telling myself i shouldve just starved. i hate the feeling of being full, not that i feel like that much anymore. i can't remember the last time i ate a full meal, it's mostly just snacks and junk food i binge on.

i dont know exactly why im like this. one factor is that all my life, my family only talked about my eating. everyday of my life my mom would tell me i need to start eating better, even when i was really young. everyday of my life my mom would threaten to send me to a hospital and get needles jabbed into me to make me ""normal."" she's calmed down a bit, but the damage is already there. i could also be like this because my friend would glamorize pro ana to me ever since we were in early elementary school, and she still does. she's recovered now, but she still talks about it with me, knowing that i struggle. often times she sends me videos on tiktok of girls bodychecking (theres a LOT of videos like that on tiktok) and ed humor. and i know the jokes are to cope, but i feel like whenever i see them, i should starve myself. it just makes me feel horrible.

this might be an eating disorder, but a lot of the times i doubt it. i'm not twig skinny,i don't have horrible side effects, and the most ive gone without eating is only 2 days. its nothing compared to anyone else with an ed.",2.4220061217321494,3.538875857142859,4.114129158512721,88.9034121130012,75.16438356164383,7.276250689949322,22.691605198454514,7.793537801064563,0.8499170154046864,1877,49,421,26,39,632,230,511,0.18,0.737,0.083,-0.9946,0,0,0,0,0,0,67.0,1,0,1,6,28,26,3,4,26,0,42,26,9,3,5,83,75,33,0,10,19,2,7,5,2,6,5,1,0,2,19,22,16,0,15,3,0,4,15,11,0,3,8,12,79,15,48,53,14,55,0,2,4,1,22,22,1,11,33,284,98,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07393461388437234,0.053578750966424296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13288920326274206,0.04684697432672238,0.06864797650467498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04084172070132865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031089032842147,0.05925481131294485,0.07314511155070452,0.22326100067361576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106985850270116,0.0,0.0,0.1296256503364511,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1535723851316855,0.0,0.05863092061312656,0.0,0.07852185252982098,0.0,0.0,0.5484502984339014,0.05596872774569328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04425193908699939,0.06060406350651229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06316031117120573,0.07539204433545559,0.16938250962364915,0.095727617078084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810149651286718,0.0,0.10352589418596676,0.0619391200324572,0.03500399980637536,0.06427115580368999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060017579855532674,0.06614724025835901,0.0,0.0,0.07551228411405217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06598011869749486,0.07730738142407922,0.0,0.0,0.14473995585874194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18410337394461165,0.05461279583509703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14196926378713734,0.16366064262060606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05626194446095978,0.0,0.07313687918080336,0.11391961649718585,0.0,0.0,0.08944416274490642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710749199377655,0.0,0.1569358857737596,0.0,0.0,0.04925167513387636,0.049678608098164274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06564439642090338,0.06428695736579539,0.0,0.07030375343664802,0.0,0.09079996170159853,0.1019108987636562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255294772805965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06333532665808814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12876304366020286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07589634576999264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06780615344342428,0.16016761389879794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055421928836254776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056767690801343564,0.0,0.06626332205975652,0.0,0.047421949275267335,0.0,0.1605154897955368,0.0,0.0,0.1400829536311859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06314538141950803,0.0,0.0,0.10770186308766352,0.11711944749466878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04451088842962349,0.08585998678084443,0.0,0.0,0.11720225586629975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09097529408241696,0.0,0.06544789051251727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039517506283417984,0.0,0.0,0.08158623728129423,0.0,0.062108367347188324,0.06045580961319425,0.0,0.0,0.06458425322382656,0.0,0.0,0.06804032382538283,0.0,0.14278163548435033,0.0,0.0,0.043144897538885285
mentalhealth,RoughFinish,2020/04/17,"An introduction Hello i am new as a redditor and thought perhaps I could share in this feed a poem I wrote about my own issues and the positive outcomes that I have been experiencing since I decided to take this journey of understanding and healing ..

​

 PTSD, Anxiety,  
Always trying to get the best of me,  
Subconsciously testing me,  
Thoughts of unworthiness  
Will I ever be free?  
Trapped in this Mental slavery,  
My own ghosts just won't stop  
Haunting me,  
Silent screams that no one could ever hear,  
Yet somehow I slowly begin to see,  
That it's not in control,  
My life is up to Me,  
I don't want to be famous,  
Or search out notoriety,  
I just wanna be free,  
Of the mental chains that bind me,  
Get back to a semblance  
Of normalcy,

Forgiveness if not to only free myself

And regain  control of my 

own mental health 

On my past 

I simply cannot dwell

or i will remain 

Living in  my own personal hell 

Forgive and set free 

all that is behind me",4.918002549936254,6.2757393977900575,6.0079558011049725,76.78705482362942,69.38674033149171,8.44215894602635,30.49766255843604,8.841846274778883,2.5715572460688483,745,30,134,13,13,248,112,181,0.109,0.7340000000000001,0.157,0.8628,0,1,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,3,8,11,1,1,7,0,15,4,0,2,3,31,26,9,1,5,7,0,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,1,9,6,1,3,6,0,4,1,6,3,0,1,4,4,24,12,24,14,6,17,1,0,1,0,7,7,1,4,8,104,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12409465062001818,0.16159081409900122,0.18121882956963792,0.0,0.0,0.11409005829123285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467781222734427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15651098793310533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345415934339563,0.238148899017292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2698074738595859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15583675774025804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.158526576180724,0.16808921253267506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1556611835185941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105340484371967,0.0,0.0,0.13169146686708322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4508876700682827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14403827906919198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1010596768425558,0.11342606651791352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14236896716230568,0.0,0.13022143094502134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17433418294198447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11884356922565245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12336838283235595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12468593284511602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213311382208206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23679761142965586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10125482046831834,0.0,0.0,0.1552577767874588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08796537663199437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18121882956963792,0.0
mentalhealth,ashhwiththecash,2020/04/17,"I don’t think I’ll be the same after this pandemic So even before this pandemic happened I was dealing with my anxiety and panic attacks ( high school shit, whatever ) and I was also dealing with some insecurities iv had for a really long time. 

So here comes this pandemic and iv been lately feeling very lonely and overall miss being able to hug and just see my friends overall. It really just breaks my heart not being able to physically see them and I’m not sure how I’ll feel when it’s all over. 

I’m kinda worried about being very depressed *maybe even for weeks* about this and not being able to effectively do my school work (I’m in a decent amount of AP classes so homework is really everything; and I’m graduating next year so grades mean a alot junior year) 

Anyways I’m pretty sure when it’s all over and I go back to school *if that even happens* I’ll probably end up getting very emotional and I feel like things just won’t be the same for me 

P.S - like yea I do text and FaceTime my friends but it’s different when u physically get to see them u know ? 

All advice is welcomed",2.7698847926267303,4.910373488479267,4.302329493087559,83.54206566820277,76.78801843317973,7.473640552995392,25.59654377880184,8.395991825355821,1.82096331797235,865,32,169,17,20,288,118,217,0.09300000000000001,0.815,0.092,0.2354,1,2,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,2,2,20,15,2,2,6,1,16,5,2,2,5,40,37,22,0,1,8,0,3,2,2,1,2,0,1,0,10,14,0,0,7,0,0,2,5,7,0,0,4,6,14,8,18,26,8,21,0,3,3,1,7,5,1,4,15,104,24,9,0.3267595457105452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10643521543182656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08710316354991691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332338602945337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12391205192846025,0.0,0.08375264032945498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09268276880731192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09382480512071238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22458316244271206,0.09381250597167998,0.0,0.0,0.11379805934780204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225201694306314,0.09647065670934014,0.0,0.0,0.2158215981991437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789013670250038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16521944433706215,0.07781236158175263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16830240963591198,0.0,0.11381225075390936,0.0,0.06190166000132957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19263492475457564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12907054498428938,0.0,0.11507980012904966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598595002740476,0.0,0.12286633340183242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10642547251465738,0.0,0.0,0.09639063847686204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10942462771142986,0.11864564604069212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11583749462312933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779397420472122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108106433882666,0.11743401884931548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093305321385368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33069810511864045,0.26038505223030595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180465933700956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20531133652787198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236150758846895,0.06979144097304722,0.0,0.0,0.06351203961149263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2696108462391996,0.0,0.0,0.08736893257901356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929494698822788,0.11061339331828678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14028162280337445
mentalhealth,y7aa,2020/04/17,"Overthinking everything I say i just want  to get this out and tell someone about it but I don’t feel that anyone would understand what i am feeling so i am writing here maybe that would help me feel better
So since i was a child I have been always quiet around people I don’t know well because i was afraid that I would say something wrong or can be misinterpreted and that grew with me, now i am 20 years old and I always overthink anything i want to say before saying it when i talk to someone i am not so familiar with, that makes texting a colleague for example very exhausting i feel that writing few texts to someone other than my close friends drain my energy and it has gotten worse recently as i keep rethinking everything i did or said during the day and feel maybe I shouldn’t have said this or that or maybe something I said or did came as rude to other people and all of that overthinking makes me feel discomfort in my stomach and have slight shortness of breath, it started making me not able to concentrate while studying as whenever I start studying these thoughts attacks me and i loose concentration and motivation to study which makes me more anxious as my exams are in two weeks and i am wasting time",8.081553672316389,7.260576194915255,7.580000000000003,75.74621468926554,62.474576271186436,10.748022598870056,36.19209039548023,9.928628108626363,3.4148344632768364,986,39,183,17,12,310,130,236,0.14400000000000002,0.758,0.098,-0.9396,0,0,2,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,2,10,9,2,2,3,0,23,3,2,5,1,50,47,25,0,6,9,0,6,0,1,4,1,8,0,1,19,16,0,1,11,0,0,2,5,6,1,1,11,14,33,3,22,31,3,19,0,0,0,0,14,6,0,5,11,131,52,2,0.10432954028347777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736210703621421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11786268429734345,0.0,0.07294964034884495,0.0,0.08585432220036067,0.0928754099993118,0.0,0.1186899135739141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635983194050251,0.0,0.08877675454750747,0.0,0.0,0.09227100013057396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932520037763705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06728392251532085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18752932719839568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31651290191558845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08060474402240053,0.0,0.05450787875513959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06992989167969084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09273288905677078,0.0,0.0,0.05733678688660775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2785631130855145,0.0,0.31443913817420205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10947630240982027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14465793383672107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301283462041257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29772385210174945,0.33186815165819245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08630247383421426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2651942427601075,0.16063595438078224,0.0,0.0,0.1476899711876849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08385613254711226,0.09118861671839032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08282600126234484,0.06083539393523415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10191480118184093,0.10861073081395484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08608279700722862,0.1230725318887528,0.0,0.08368686415454718,0.0,0.09380478618893587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632071467084672,0.22233813616991333,0.11406797437436852,0.0,0.06718480336421875
mentalhealth,AddieBowleyYT,2020/04/17,"Hey guys. I hope you are all able to look at the positives during these rough times. Please consider checking out the link below as a little “pick me up” I want to start this by saying: I am NOT looking for views or anything. You don’t even have to click on the video if you don’t want to, so I copy and pasted the message from the description here to make it easier to find :) 

This video exist for two reasons.

The first one: it is important during these rough times that we think and give our best wishes to the people who are being affected by this virus the most. And if you aren’t one of them, make sure to find a way to either help or support people who are worse off than yourself. And remember no matter how bad it gets to focus on the positives...

Second: It is also important that we focus on our own mental health and take some time to breathe, get off our phones and the internet and just sit down and decompress. I encourage you to do this with me, and if it makes it more relaxing to you try listening to some music during your ten minutes as well! Remember to look after yourself, loved ones and friends during these times. And keep your head up! 

Focus on the positives and stay healthy! 
- Addie

https://youtu.be/h_GDtW4Jn3M",4.763198529411763,5.990325020833333,5.010049019607845,84.28808823529413,69.625,8.480392156862745,25.784313725490193,8.841846274778883,1.78051225490196,975,28,190,17,17,307,138,240,0.038,0.7490000000000001,0.213,0.9916,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,5,8,1,2,7,10,0,0,13,0,12,4,2,7,2,48,32,22,0,7,8,0,2,0,1,0,1,2,0,1,17,16,0,1,7,3,1,0,5,1,1,7,0,9,21,9,38,31,8,24,0,0,5,1,27,13,0,9,8,142,38,0,0.127375207908034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018619077446597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10481894303723027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635297813721968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13367242227364912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08413012351906002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2328372648629728,0.1083452867769186,0.0,0.0,0.0984097696618824,0.0,0.13309657782823262,0.12218990598009145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612148173061352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13072371106201405,0.13539388967299004,0.0,0.0,0.0853769169066063,0.0,0.0,0.1265123219348937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11321693732594185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766342099163067,0.0,0.0,0.32088928313066584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149610981971448,0.0,0.2550718210899353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283642506026689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589382121243238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12159404875341405,0.17661186225812395,0.0,0.0,0.1398197282259697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13096292804037882,0.0,0.0,0.2885825604939713,0.0,0.0,0.10129387779496336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015682775390364,0.13576502381927627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454387646953207,0.12004962602965542,0.0,0.0957703043066282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161689004199411,0.0,0.0,0.2970940322218505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647940504131628,0.0,0.12442706978455599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15025839560399784,0.10110451120949124,0.0,0.0,0.1145256090568301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14647520293604485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298062188267358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Illustrious_Poet,2020/04/17,Tips for Overthinking Lately I have found myself constantly thinking about everything possible in my life and its alllll negative. I have been struggling to focus. ANY advice will help. How can I limit this overthinking and keep my mind in the present?,5.434186046511628,8.927403116279073,5.601209302325582,70.22227906976744,75.97674418604652,9.951627906976746,29.53023255813953,9.888512548439397,4.222222325581397,206,9,29,7,5,65,36,43,0.141,0.8009999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.5859,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,1,0,5,1,0,1,0,8,8,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,6,0,5,5,0,5,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28942232456088873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014116214350312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3200638742999489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2661862504911982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3247445750259231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19852228919671386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632571705344364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341023896945876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2091997219187013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29905598027009844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3338968980930445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096302061811092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18977930376634872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RuneMesa18,2020/04/17,"Keep Having Irrational Thoughts During the Lockdown I've dealt with irrational thoughts all my life but it's so bad right now. I find I tend to get the most irrational when people tell me what to do, if I feel persecuted. 

Right now the big thing is the mask mandates that have been going out. I can't stop focusing on them, knowing that the government is telling me what to wear. I understand the need for them, I know I have to be compassionate during this time. But there's this almost primal part of my brain that tells me to lash out when people tell me to wear a mask. I've been such an asshole to people recently.

I've tried talking to myself rationally but just when I feel like I can actually wear a mask I just can't do it. I think about how I'd be helping my community, how I'd be saving lives, how it'll keep me healthy. But then my brain just goes ""Yeah, but you'd be giving into what other people are telling you and then you'd just be like everyone else. Just another freaked out idiot trying to get some bread"" I can't look like that, I won't listen to what the CDC tells me.

I'm losing friends over this, I feel isolated. It's really mixing bad with my depression. I think a lot about how I don't care if I get sick because it's not like have a future. I'm so tired of all of this, I hate my brain.",2.51247272727273,3.919072083636365,3.9599090909090897,88.93586363636366,75.43636363636364,7.472727272727273,23.40909090909091,8.150884317080207,1.091181818181818,1033,30,230,17,22,342,131,275,0.198,0.6920000000000001,0.11,-0.9840000000000001,0,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,3,2,1,20,15,2,0,12,1,25,10,6,4,2,46,50,19,0,3,13,0,3,4,1,2,3,1,0,0,19,7,1,3,11,0,0,1,6,7,0,0,4,5,36,8,24,37,6,21,0,2,1,0,17,9,0,6,15,148,55,1,0.0,0.0,0.100602966550756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10323179333748753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10810099991743898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17215510597839606,0.06284395491377699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3452544567233181,0.0,0.0,0.10510921252144692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08879302891762626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612017668779035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09850886870882396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15637930941961584,0.07364897889161061,0.0,0.0,0.094224263180687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964865969052685,0.0,0.16158401858632868,0.09889528521877464,0.058589586000467625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10178205308406252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691004259382452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1832658961251584,0.0,0.0,0.11331338575333838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07281696150713135,0.2014622669054107,0.0,0.09103216613108688,0.0,0.08657135498580887,0.11533363053717265,0.0,0.08764517165300302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07644144648877804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163864052709882,0.0,0.28588417923624365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06604340505564807,0.0,0.10179095917924623,0.0,0.0,0.17608008950453194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08618956735004088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286148222680934,0.5406419576471465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06848977510275216,0.13211444193577626,0.0,0.163687139462618,0.060113801581455614,0.11848914243867445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13998546538704046,0.0,0.0,0.1073224565409702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,confused_noodles,2020/04/17,"My sister helped Me/Myself/I = 20F, generalized anxiety/panic attacks/ADHD/little bit of depression (IT’S A PARTY in my brain) 

TL;DR: the above-described brain freaked out when my dog ate my chocolate and my sister knew how to help me, a welcome surprise after being away at college for years.

It started when my idiot dog snuck out of the living room on the first floor during dinner. She then proceeded to go upstairs to my room (I usually close it but there was PIZZA). She took my gallon ziploc baggy of candy out of my Easter basket, took the boxes of Cadbury eggs out of the bag, then proceeded to EAT SIX WHOLE CADBURY EGGS, leaving no trace. We only caught her because we realized she was not bugging us about our pizza and I then heard her chewing through the plastic container of my dove chocolate (which she took out of the basket/bag/its unopened box). She completely ignored everything that wasn’t a large container of chocolate.

ANYWAYS, I had PLANS that got derailed. I had been eating my chocolate slowly on purpose (self restraint bc I’m allergic and addicted to it so...). This plan derailment was not good for my brain as it is described above. It could not handle being simultaneously mad and worried about the dog on top of THE PLAN being destroyed on top of the fact that I had forgotten to take one of my dinner meds on top of a stressful day of working two jobs and taking 17 credits of classes all online. 

So there was a breakdown, complete with a minor panic attack. I haven’t been home for one of these in a while but covid19, ya know. So it was a surprise when my younger sister (17) knocked and came in. She looked at me, huddled in the corner of my room with my blanket, then came and sat down by me. She asked me “would you like a hug or would that make it worse” because she knows physical contact is usually not good for me. But sometimes a girl needs a hug from her sister. She asked what was up and I explained in between breaths and tears until I got all calmed down. She asked if I needed anything.

I’ve been away at college for the better parts of 3 years and I’ve gotten so used to dealing with these brain things on my own and it was really nice to have someone know that I needed someone to sit down, ask to give me a hug, and talk to me.",4.698593230146102,5.780736724215245,5.313344423549836,82.59353175177205,69.65022421524664,7.4588745841168835,30.082164038767534,7.601502580125103,1.9196705627079416,1793,70,337,19,31,578,221,446,0.12,0.7809999999999999,0.098,-0.91,1,0,0,0,0,0,55.0,4,2,0,9,13,22,4,2,24,0,24,20,5,3,3,56,57,32,0,7,9,4,0,1,0,2,2,1,4,2,20,25,10,3,6,0,1,7,7,9,0,5,27,2,53,13,71,24,6,61,0,1,1,3,38,34,0,2,20,240,73,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09582193966721177,0.1056364751611552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07233267438897723,0.0,0.3286915574450773,0.09999681613888173,0.16516637953408536,0.0,0.0,0.107163772569869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773875603390465,0.09596199626528464,0.0,0.0,0.3924935461683817,0.0,0.20106409657914287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18431904109399685,0.0,0.0,0.07017950719059562,0.0,0.0,0.056687024417431515,0.0906191159502315,0.07570653350647323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988346854022047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07899717460333372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.074766107374615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08431989893027679,0.04995453482941481,0.14744956800896405,0.14060033386839332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1178325320213704,0.0,0.08816899458460961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08722533450360245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14491954615984687,0.0,0.0,0.09307143179120958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0429425880772518,0.08809702134365795,0.07761566216829317,0.0,0.07381229435268083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058672686590465324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763501100126433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1955260565079279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11912410003854675,0.06685049129886507,0.0,0.10312952084422236,0.0,0.09518511287099668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056309795021920614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916969230158116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14895160639384913,0.0,0.08693350149060593,0.0,0.06221475123585195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10068701484281506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.132176914531262,0.07064919011175545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058395614125041136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929741812263082,0.0,0.0,0.0858637042419337,0.0,0.10573063187889116,0.0759157655494577,0.19361475158975236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09813512692744723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0639908879832132,0.08926482115341385,0.08957570729103495,0.1248806241057084,0.0,0.0,0.11320703212333047
mentalhealth,zZEpicSniper303Zz,2020/04/17,"I really need help! My issues aren't nearly at the level of what some people here are experiencing, but I need serious help. Basically, I can't sleep. It got a lot worse during quarantine, because my day just feels so unfurfilled, when I have to go to bed, I just feel so unsatisfied with my day, and then I go like, ok maybe just browse some twitter or reddit, or watch some youtube, to make yourself feel happier, but then I get way too deep into this thought process of: c'mon if you don't watch all of it now, then when are you gonna get the time to do it? Which is a stupid thought process I know, bit my mind just doesn't work the same in this stage of conciousness where I feel like I wanna colapse of tiredness but, I keep denying that I'm tired. Then something even worse sets in, I like to call it Fear Of Insomnia Induced Insomnia or FOIII for short. It' where I basically get so afraid of not being able to sleep that I fall into a loop of trying to fall asleep, getting startled by the thought of not being able to sleep, then browsing social media to calm down, trying to fall asleep again, and it just keeps going on, and on, and on, until like 4-5 am where I am so tired I just fall asleep instantly, like if my subconciousse is taking control and saying, ok no more wasting time SLEEP NOW! 

And then, here is the payoff of this horid cycle, I wake up at like 1-2pm because I have no things to do early because it's quarantine, and lose more than half of my day, still feeling sleepy as fuck, the day just seems to breeze right past me, and oh golly oh gee it looks like it's time to sleep again! I think you're picking up on the even bigger problem here... I feel unsatisfied with my day again, I can't sleep again, and the whooooole cycle begins anew...",7.271992729676143,5.545968241573036,7.161328486450759,81.01790812954397,64.61797752808988,10.17422339722406,32.177131526768015,8.671277953709913,2.2528253800396567,1378,40,294,16,17,440,173,356,0.16,0.73,0.11,-0.9741,0,2,1,0,0,0,48.0,0,2,0,3,29,18,2,3,11,2,18,15,10,4,1,59,49,31,0,6,17,0,6,7,0,1,4,1,1,0,17,13,0,3,13,0,0,7,9,8,0,1,4,11,31,10,46,42,9,59,0,1,3,1,7,22,1,10,34,188,48,1,0.17280728506180965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15801257555167247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943303992965312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08822777953042528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09690903214925972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2786160071871587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413758199900435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722811948978168,0.2621296668156105,0.061726779488342515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07987877523007464,0.1805693481742614,0.0,0.14731554366911015,0.0,0.06910488605492435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158290805556972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.090182954431185,0.0,0.1535990549780689,0.0,0.0,0.047485182284520124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29548718726825096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07255729841252093,0.09666357479626876,0.0,0.07345728705627863,0.0,0.0,0.05767510232465889,0.0,0.0868040723611883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08724304804646997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12813441224017352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248205357168834,0.059901406497746924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267661683526563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055352385897011344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07378823861991067,0.0,0.06871164452884981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865863106627066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5187962532492184,0.08807763249297801,0.0,0.0665177453203342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06900206053731567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06496478611725158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05740274079285744,0.05536396530763056,0.0,0.20578452236703434,0.15114797639837335,0.19861655319997928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732480318886175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06858318968251705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06290288082491463,0.0,0.17610538681737092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Wretched_Luck,2020/04/17,"I’m not sure what is going on with me Hello, before anyone reads this I just want to say...this isn’t as important or serious as many posts I see here. So just, I’m sorry if I waste anyone’s time! So I started therapy this year and i have session every month, for the past few sessions we’ve been trying to figure out what’s happening with me.

At first, it’s prescribed as depression, which I already guessed but go figure. The pills make me feel better, great right? Well things still aren’t right, I’m awful and school and always have been, even though I’m on depression pills I still get these “fits” of sadness. Due to some school stuff and attention issues she prescribed me with ADHD, I asked a friend who has ADHD and she said I checked all the boxes. However things don’t really feel right with me, when I go to the doctors to ask about meds they say no. They want to wait to see if the depression pills help clear the possible ADHD. Fine by me, I’m not even sure if I really have it. The doctor isn’t sure either.   
I just got off the phone with the therapist now, she says I have symptoms of bipolar disorder.   
we know I don’t have bipolar disorder, just symptoms.   


honestly I’m just so confused at this point. She says some of the symptoms and they fit with me...kinda..almost but something is off. Like whenever she says something it almost fits but not quite. Even she says that trying to find out what’s happening has been confusing.   


I will list of the things I feel here: 

crazy overwhelming feelings of boredom. Not like normal bored feelings, like crazy. I’m so bored I feel like I absolutely h a v e to do something, if I don’t do something I just keep breaking down. The thing is I just can’t do anything at the same time, I’ll have things to do put right in front of me and I just can’t. My mind just tells me no, so at these moments I just feel trapped. These moments are rare, I have to feel really bored to have them.   


Im very sensitive. Now again not just sensitive, like crazy sensitive. Its hard to know where to even start... first I’ll go with the most “destructive “  overreaction, anger. Things can get me so angry, I say stuff I don’t mean, crazy stuff. Once my brother and I got in a fight and he kept trying to walk away, I screamed that I wanted to kill him, while crying. I felt so angry I was crying pulling my hair and scratching my face, while again screaming I wanted to kill him. I love my brother though... Another time I was doing math, I kept getting all the questions wrong and I was getting so frustrated. I grabbed a pair of (thankfully dull) scissors and slammed them full force into my knee several times before just crying with frustration more. Sometimes I get highly irritated from normal things...like someone sits close to me... I can feel anger take over me. Anyways next emotion, sadness,  I can go from slightly upset to really horrible things in less than an hour. Like I’ll be sad, or just inconvenienced by something then it just escalates so far. I’ll tell myself I should run away, and it’s okay if I die. I’ll tell my parents I wanna jump out of the car. Even in 3rd grade I told myself I’d grow up to be homeless and I’d die on the streets. 

this is all I can think of for now, if I rack my brain enough I’m sure I’ll think of more words to describe what’s going on.   
This might just be so clear, maybe it’s just clear cut. I’m just really stupid and I feel like the things I’ve been described with...doesn’t fit fully.   
If anyone knows what this is please let me know.",2.077026420737788,4.204189024011299,3.1039215686274524,91.35349950149558,78.95762711864407,6.311598537720172,22.55865736124959,7.39963492309942,0.8010447989365241,2751,86,580,38,68,878,287,708,0.255,0.657,0.08800000000000001,-0.9993,3,1,5,0,1,0,99.0,1,0,5,4,48,48,10,4,23,2,48,15,4,1,10,121,111,46,4,15,35,3,15,7,1,3,10,9,0,0,36,29,0,4,23,1,1,14,16,28,1,2,14,26,83,20,74,90,14,82,0,8,2,1,39,38,0,18,34,364,119,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1844216648522929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10244121947545423,0.0,0.05644670018539901,0.0,0.04256195562759586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053636568251096264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10729847532101028,0.0,0.04209313816931574,0.0,0.0956390680940427,0.0,0.09611660696059332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705192935239231,0.0,0.0,0.04523914298051362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571017358648503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856180997509412,0.0,0.0,0.13216954587096816,0.0,0.10617388838659804,0.0,0.11724757762097662,0.10471098792824636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057538295795264524,0.0,0.05285293717630502,0.0,0.16892466241677187,0.0,0.04309715247288593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586361985288605,0.10962743598931753,0.04911324234209628,0.0,0.046751335573769086,0.08701849101216583,0.0,0.0,0.03951934556444474,0.0,0.1336221411428697,0.0,0.1744226786459501,0.0,0.08182068933809662,0.056394457536689764,0.05634889253057481,0.0,0.09046580112103733,0.0,0.045821492234432014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03428561914179487,0.05404412686218285,0.0,0.0,0.050373698902913384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05525215094775263,0.0533886380497107,0.0,0.045465600471423714,0.11318260670381708,0.0,0.11244560463573038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05230564083222518,0.0,0.17492949292795132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04616601971258113,0.0,0.034143870999933275,0.05185936090926276,0.05138832753664847,0.05571873029913438,0.0568175315368288,0.0,0.0,0.054263415816340636,0.051648202743908515,0.0,0.04082845699243736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054399957662331085,0.0,0.10023477148111354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054474434874320035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056797433784891826,0.0,0.04882967664466937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056148735795985706,0.04835448522940185,0.0576653731274539,0.04898877869085338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05142115605028071,0.05730113072857065,0.05440567369828397,0.05116511387672509,0.0,0.1638440720024556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17473162589766933,0.04865657283032405,0.2847428097562783,0.0,0.1035356354232653,0.08152188180126721,0.0,0.0,0.05778637729567537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334030644823833,0.19689373957580916,0.05058991556302987,0.057259660758024626,0.07241026664816376,0.0,0.08169894317494399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17566790449803502,0.0,0.0,0.19283787259125929,0.15949727004393188,0.0384593904010696,0.0,0.13412539792830094,0.04709321851410026,0.05849593697062575,0.05939056883029958,0.27186105583531256,0.0655513389076488,0.10051172930740973,0.0,0.1193068713080962,0.0,0.0,0.048877232068847386,0.0,0.1041850673092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04220515607787551,0.1206813811318873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045991136203710085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055925885651148866,0.0,0.03293974186050344
mentalhealth,THETIME-KNIFE,2020/04/18,"Have you ever had a therapist with a disability? Are you a therapist with a disability? I would like to discuss your experience with you for a class project. 

The title pretty much covers it. If you are a therapist with a disability, or you are someone who has or once had a therapist with a disability, I'd like to discuss your experience with you. It can be by phone, Skype or online and can be as anonymous as you like. Comment here or DM me if interested. I am on a tight deadline so this would be sooner rather than later.",3.9389563106796115,5.534730699029126,6.042900485436893,74.66978762135922,72.10679611650484,9.421844660194175,30.350728155339805,9.827888789773867,3.102748543689321,414,18,79,11,8,145,56,103,0.0,0.861,0.139,0.9146,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,9,0,0,4,4,0,0,11,0,15,0,0,0,1,18,15,10,0,5,7,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,12,4,14,8,1,3,0,0,0,0,14,1,0,6,5,68,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15556699795849052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33646156677898426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25206423513541343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12642609755335396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18315454933375885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17496688471631108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14571925920531498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7987345178622107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2443412659231674,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,oloblor,2020/04/18,"How to deal with constant failure in things you really enjoy? To give a bit of context, i'm massively into music. I've played guitar for 14 years, been in a band and have supported some pretty large bands, have toured uk and am releasing a new album/solo album soon, so essentially music is my entire life, but i cannot make a career out of it. I also suffer badly with depression and anxiety, as well as BPD and ADHD

I've fully accepted the fact that it's near impossible to make it big and live off of the music i make, due to the state of the industry and the genre we play (metalcore,) so i've made many attempts to get a more commercially viable job in the music industry.

I went to university to pursue music production, came out with a 2:1 (2nd highest grade achievable) and attempted to pursue a career in production, but quickly realised that i not only did have the money or talent to do it. The vocalist of my band who is entirely self taught is miles better than me and is producing my solo EP, which made me think that i'm not good enough for it, justifying it by how many people are already out there doing it.

I then tried to get into live sound, and was shot down multiple times by other live sound engineers or venues, even when i ask to shadow the sound guy unpaid one day a week or anything, just to get some experience. 

The thing i discovered recently, is that i'm really not bad at woodworking. I've built 2 guitars now, one of them works perfectly, but the second time i've tried to build the neck and i'm over 15 attempts in to the neck, wasted so much money and had really put me into a depressive state when i've been improving so much over the past few months.

​

Tl/dr; i keep failing at the things i love no matter how hard i try, how do i deal with this cause i feel like shit.",9.211570247933883,6.123432581267218,9.646347107438011,69.00588429752068,62.03030303030303,13.206170798898071,36.04573002754821,11.4731,3.9091187878787865,1429,43,278,32,15,486,199,363,0.11,0.767,0.12300000000000001,0.5056,1,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,1,1,1,9,18,19,1,0,24,0,19,5,3,11,2,53,41,31,0,0,10,0,2,1,0,0,1,3,0,2,18,23,0,1,3,7,2,3,5,7,1,3,10,5,22,12,49,31,8,42,0,4,0,1,14,20,1,5,18,182,40,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12735742393504013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11694243728366263,0.08474555279922043,0.0,0.11482032329008075,0.12876724901384404,0.0,0.0,0.08106808205791742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720570297767452,0.0,0.09906926078690907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17696393330223306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09372338194064732,0.1156936808177853,0.0,0.13346768202131892,0.0,0.0,0.12120342593351692,0.0,0.10886215617419767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11451779109779005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06834299790231514,0.218504397256452,0.18254658852876465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10949712331627452,0.0,0.06999332706944343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1036606846140465,0.0,0.0,0.05358248990003806,0.07570622383972801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16609756257479938,0.10165773799097637,0.0,0.0888840578659403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10492867182411447,0.0,0.0,0.0949298535480196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10516058858745338,0.09419254118009243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0748509656230373,0.0517724335867792,0.0,0.2807249326244389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956436221629009,0.20054602312869133,0.21221085448307533,0.21487739906082226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0845856224641074,0.0,0.15580282706192855,0.0,0.0,0.10234815550058993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14361837127132915,0.08059627460710672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10116200557066113,0.07346745328726267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1078113451596316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065308564843058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2036646080445628,0.0,0.104634297127539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11055162414542408,0.0,0.10877845619939523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025546140230155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21120872234871774,0.0679024045151422,0.0,0.0,0.12358593389544142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21584354195520927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08500412829027935,0.0,0.09528131039443744,0.09823685377796317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714868028703947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12876724901384404,0.06824231857681495
mentalhealth,ernixbrz,2020/04/18,"I am having trouble thinking and just seem to lack common sense Hi Everyone, I’m writing because I’m starting to get worried about my mental health. I don’t know how to describe what I’m experiencing but i will try my best. I’ve always been good at school, had good grades although I didn’t ever revise. I loved maths and got an amazing grade, i just loved every single bit of it ( I’m telling you this because i will use it later.) i have an Engineering Diploma, i am also told that i am very smart although I don’t see it personally but the reason why I’m naming all this is because i am not uneducated or lazy or anything. Anyway let me explain what I’m having trouble with... i am having trouble with remembering things, learning new things and just using ‘common sense’. I’m a gamer and even that is hard for me now, for a while now I can’t even play a game without doing really bad. More and more i notice that I’m having trouble with stuff. For example, i just became a manager at my work, I’ve had trouble remembering everything to do with that role, and now I’m having trouble counting stupid money although thats what i enjoy. Counting!  I have £10,£20 and £5 notes and I can’t even count them correctly to £200 at the end of the shift. I seem to do things different than others and i end up doing them the hard and wrong way. What could all this mean. I’m really worried now",3.1927369097333766,4.60823127561838,4.937772245422423,82.57275538066176,73.69964664310955,7.124253132026984,26.644555091551556,7.686295010490155,1.513043816254417,1093,39,217,14,22,372,140,283,0.126,0.7140000000000001,0.16,0.9535,1,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,2,2,16,18,1,0,10,0,30,3,0,4,4,45,55,20,0,2,10,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,20,14,0,0,10,2,1,0,7,9,0,0,6,4,29,9,22,45,8,18,0,0,1,2,14,4,0,4,13,152,49,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09472099377388833,0.0985563215804658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974707294477858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889722275006388,0.21661022154228926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1243014681176212,0.0,0.1293120412628953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456926369635103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237505600446588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2098154900721064,0.0,0.0,0.23469682875038606,0.10714092841899236,0.0997956215988855,0.1131799545088826,0.10645136928705112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061882996298264464,0.0,0.0,0.1986932886416928,0.09473185678893503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2122081872114665,0.0,0.0,0.12590225398964386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0650946661600506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211187663329725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21380376055527006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12902210484558313,0.0,0.0,0.1193654198250836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11439560755369232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348512291340486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10342222779759062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517587132566552,0.12178191991670467,0.0,0.0,0.2683518060973612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198733849202782,0.0943858979243084,0.21565705693982967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08383648519285405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355920033261626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10352677373811617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360702056187169,0.07589523016681528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1131799545088826,0.0,0.0804168640452106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045981323710146,0.0,0.0977301177408282,0.0,0.09401669366719984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687883279614492,0.0,0.0,0.11417744044348645,0.0,0.08622988963734257,0.2405747417843377,0.0,0.0,0.1295017930833345,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rossiapacifica,2020/04/18,"I feel very depressed lately I've been feeling overwhelmed and depressed and I think that I have been killing this feeling with working almost nonstop. I love working, but it might be affecting too much of my life rn. I can't sleep, I'm worried sick about where my life is going, I'm in a weird kind of relationship which isn't a relationship (I'm not even sure what it is). It's been too much on me lately...
I either work, or cry in my bed because I can't sleep with these feelings of sadness and uncertainty.
Anybody have tips on how to get some balance? I've tried things like meditation, online courses, I've even been on medication (antidepressants). I always get back to this awfully painful state.
Thanks for any tips.",3.7816190476190457,5.8545304000000025,4.46857142857143,83.80476190476192,73.57142857142857,6.9523809523809526,29.523809523809533,7.793537801064563,1.9281666666666684,576,25,110,8,12,184,87,140,0.21,0.684,0.106,-0.9567,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,0,3,8,12,1,1,2,1,13,8,2,2,1,20,26,6,1,0,4,0,4,1,0,1,5,0,1,0,10,5,0,0,5,0,0,1,4,7,0,0,4,4,12,5,14,20,4,11,0,4,0,1,3,6,0,4,4,68,22,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436775578374141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938939955361637,0.0,0.0,0.09757340059046356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11032961594668772,0.0,0.08746594120802856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576094032323174,0.0,0.0,0.2471634975121305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18953841493748985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901973839300745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499279529136327,0.0,0.0815447291875673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15874274636854974,0.14941552652768042,0.0,0.0,0.3237102812204577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20269265621071794,0.07009857518102278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949906300103936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14454408709495914,0.0,0.15221285151288194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21095311596489172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1526760914385955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3080942173762201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28717336216573897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523108536946518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13209992347720667,0.0,0.0,0.09532376901974933,0.09193815082883053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741557881199812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11838855071164035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31337212820909793,0.14571401158650388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soyjackcringecomp,2020/04/18,"Quarantine really reveals your position among your family My mom and siblings have excellent, interesting conversations, are genuinely interested in each other’s emotions, truly care about each other, and are overall really social with each other. With me? I’m the family outcast. They’re never rude to me directly, but my mom only really talks to me to ask if I took my meds and how my college applications are doing. My siblings avoid me because I can’t hold a conversation/use English fluently like a normal person, every word from my mouth makes it more obvious to them that I’m a mental disaster. In short, you know you suck when your family knows you suck.",6.235416666666668,8.194485708333339,7.703333333333338,63.58166666666668,66.91666666666666,11.666666666666668,31.666666666666664,11.429527900616536,4.615916666666667,535,22,80,19,9,184,82,120,0.125,0.758,0.11699999999999999,-0.7236,0,2,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,6,1,1,3,9,3,1,4,0,6,1,1,2,2,21,16,7,0,2,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,2,3,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,0,19,5,11,15,4,7,0,0,0,0,14,4,2,1,3,57,24,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631279023721031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10636964067764293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17790779054494674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1962817431453362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701833092308214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4934909319932773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19179416927350956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524872825967722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11647579103564558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19382298306064374,0.0,0.17584844416473633,0.0,0.0,0.408729443630894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13458017306257694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17096661795557222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1327101980092761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1523610261406335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3353550842496666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17787418667101895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140251295491754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19386874026264125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20989424041124044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hiyaaaaa_,2020/04/18,"Struggling with mental health, looking for texting or chat therapy programs? Hello! 

I’m not doing to well and just struggling overall with my mental health. I am most comfortable chatting or texting a counselor/therapist. Are there any programs like that that charge about $100 a month? Thanks!",5.344666666666669,8.872007200000002,4.18,79.93666666666667,77.0,5.7333333333333325,34.333333333333336,7.1686216300943375,2.893333333333333,240,13,33,3,6,70,40,50,0.134,0.687,0.18,0.5458,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,2,2,0,3,2,0,0,0,8,6,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,2,4,5,6,1,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,3,2,22,4,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15475813583474302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.483801077802088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11118116980691699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1911048588291966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4586821675839446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1816474096903805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4758195496894134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095195799011926,0.2602507224334761,0.2642309747355982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20461637239116973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kb1999_19,2020/04/18,What are my chances of falling in love twice? She left over a year ago and now I’m dealing with mental health oml. What are the chances,0.06892857142857167,2.441872321428576,0.20428571428571551,106.06571428571432,93.64285714285714,2.8000000000000003,21.285714285714285,3.1291,-0.7713857142857141,107,4,25,0,4,31,25,28,0.051,0.701,0.248,0.7351,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,4,4,0,7,0,0,0,1,3,3,0,0,3,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502903065917757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4073982018062957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42004236830243535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4293483908032652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566522246019105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3982338047805464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544735778718142
mentalhealth,innocent1234,2020/04/18,"Huge Struggle Even After Getting What I Wanted... 2018-2019 were really rough for me for many reasons and I felt like I just couldn’t get a break. I felt like I was an ant and god was like a child pointing a magnifying glass on me, aiming it so that the sun would burn and kill me. That’s how all of the last two years felt for me. 

I kept saying to everyone, “I just need one win, just one and then I’ll be okay and able to snowball happiness from that one win”. I convinced myself of this, so I waited and waited.

Finally at the beginning of this year I got two of the things I was working so hard for - I bought a condo and moved out of toxic family environment to live on my own and I attained a destination I worked really hard for.

Initially, I felt amazing. I couldn’t believe it and it almost didn’t feel real after all the shit I went through. 

But eventually I was like “is that it?”. I kept feeling like wait, wasn’t this supposed to change everything for me? Wasn’t this supposed to be my ticket to happiness?

Surprise, surprise, it wasn’t. This is not to say things haven’t improved for me and that I’m not grateful for what I have. This just says that I’m finally realizing that maybe even getting what I want isn’t going to fix me. 

I decided, okay maybe it’s because I’m taking all this for granted so I try to actively practice gratitude daily but it still doesn’t help me. If anything, I’m getting worse! I’m stuck in this utter spiral of self-hatred, body dysmorphia, imposter syndrome, loneliness, sadness and frustration. 

What will it take for me to be happy? I don’t even know anymore. I can’t get the courage to see a doctor. I’m so afraid.",1.8312238108083816,3.9663954332344247,3.589166441866741,87.51895512993437,79.83086053412464,6.696124449240178,24.45544465425771,7.793537801064563,1.3522589515331358,1299,48,267,22,33,434,162,337,0.083,0.743,0.175,0.9622,0,0,0,0,0,1,42.0,0,0,0,5,14,23,3,2,13,2,24,3,2,2,3,48,59,21,1,7,9,0,9,5,0,2,1,3,1,1,29,12,0,5,10,1,1,3,13,6,0,5,19,13,37,17,36,33,4,21,0,1,1,0,5,7,1,2,15,179,66,3,0.09589360865756412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09602359726747882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09510069240699756,0.0,0.0,0.07891226926019161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05845585378535464,0.0,0.0,0.10803925905142782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10651618155193836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10144272292095226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815117182113356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900104723724755,0.0,0.0,0.0916304525026212,0.08618299220583799,0.0,0.09039995992973414,0.0,0.09697337963563668,0.06850641318541281,0.368291609748948,0.21009352208360146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2505022633041871,0.0,0.054498547669172406,0.0,0.07669487889131797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3062415886511534,0.1718036758657786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06427546453264778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609207015946244,0.0,0.052700619483677054,0.07816608980536909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2342438670840844,0.0,0.08467581329698187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722106808174152,0.19267603774712067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1019197301303802,0.0,0.07110389575608046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1949399729173913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09065045573489834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10914792043497858,0.12286380240443995,0.09859460075794474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287753394763569,0.0,0.0,0.07641479071271258,0.0,0.10003794744878784,0.0,0.09843341125880506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765807597447548,0.0,0.0,0.10024882050352528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14420011920728545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12741490521057594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06510546565669552,0.0,0.1873482435442613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11312106980792146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889433594251639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13962337838014732,0.0,0.09772377964223933,0.06812006826829134,0.0,0.0,0.1235046799600262
mentalhealth,froyotae,2020/04/18,"murder well, i’ve already had two dreams about murdering people. does this mean anything??",5.242000000000001,8.869500200000003,3.855,80.7825,80.33333333333334,5.666666666666668,27.5,7.1686216300943375,2.083,73,3,10,1,2,21,15,15,0.387,0.414,0.19899999999999998,-0.7622,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,1,1,1,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4471481445195071,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3334449767230397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35459314637973016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4413814587284836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28091457800121017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39582140580534936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36432335548912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,IHaveTheBigSad-,2020/04/18,Why do I always feel so conspired against and why does it cause such a strong reaction? It took me awhile to realize it but one of the reasons I have relationship issues/mentally in general is because of this. Whenever a person or a small group meets in private or without me I begin to think of all the things they are saying that they don't want anything to do with me that's why there doing it. That they don't want me to be apart of something or only when they want to. That I am doing something wrong not wanted or am considered lesser than.  It makes me very anxious it makes me paranoid depressed a little suicideal and angry all at once. It feels like a betrayal. Is this a sign of anything specific? I know it sounds rather petty And it makes me feel that way but it's like an explosion of emotions and it drives me insane and leaves me in a terrible state.,3.9549444197421093,5.359328069364164,4.946820809248553,83.29879057358829,71.77456647398844,8.097643397065362,28.33659404179636,8.617729084823388,2.10865887060916,688,26,134,12,13,225,98,173,0.201,0.753,0.046,-0.9816,0,0,2,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,4,1,5,6,0,0,10,0,13,0,0,5,2,34,27,13,1,5,9,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,19,6,0,0,7,0,0,2,4,3,0,1,1,5,18,3,19,25,2,13,0,1,0,0,9,7,0,4,4,99,37,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157743839931695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650657170797276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2404765400157432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890689216883264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15009795094551645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1258466204105746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786417386266408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435707686596232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216368540694252,0.10438291387488707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029969704922757,0.0,0.0,0.15471221049495745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14276653099546532,0.14644327102085114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2925940064547093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15560521485944567,0.0990097201981945,0.1111252624191194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12757993934377795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15022815005058285,0.0,0.15687031626883055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11619465218351985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2249693289842023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1598235355716591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09707075920743456,0.09362309309478956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16233654202704342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12055824709014445,0.3447241313083264,0.11597742894147307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3955318492641371,0.0,0.0,0.1408473907051843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15975125713611055,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nearby-Recipe,2020/04/18,Abandonment Fears with phone Do Not Disturb Is it just me who turns on Do Not Disturb to shield myself from feeling abandoned?,3.4959420289855068,6.671492217391311,2.791304347826088,88.70550724637683,83.34782608695653,4.8057971014492775,29.40579710144928,6.42735559955562,1.6507797101449282,103,5,17,1,3,30,20,23,0.28600000000000003,0.528,0.187,-0.6351,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,1,5,0,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,0,1,2,0,4,5,0,1,0,2,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,14,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6841851822036648,0.3074303243279206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.661345017473155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,otrgallery,2020/04/18,"I have trouble dealing with Anxiety and Depression, what are some tips on how to deal with it in a healthy way? Long story short, I have issues living in the moment as I always look toward the next step and I make up scenarios in my head and end up overthinking. I ask because this stuff is creeping into my relationship with my girlfriend creating some issues that I feel could be avoided if I could learn how to deal with everything.",8.692951807228916,7.426172240963857,8.425391566265063,71.61471385542171,61.53012048192771,11.673493975903616,37.61746987951807,10.686352973137794,3.9713879518072286,348,14,62,7,4,112,59,83,0.124,0.818,0.057999999999999996,-0.6808,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,3,0,7,1,1,3,0,19,11,7,0,3,1,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,5,8,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,2,10,0,15,8,2,15,0,1,1,0,6,9,0,3,4,48,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15299805748443454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14066325348941922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17189754820056685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11208800070115416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29361716044692066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5686986537663249,0.15837057201813096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16285795723903895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16525426737015242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297231620724147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18870796855710067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3838337685803702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16236428014641,0.16272287361539858,0.1544080112663618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273745087506888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19555228905355332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974120690655612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21049195816818775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14595077486172892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RookieDook,2020/04/18,"My mood is instable and I never noticed I don't know why but after my best friend (21M) asked me (18M) to log my mood I found out that it's extremly unstable.
I have a imgur link here with a graph I created with the help of an app. Why is my mood so instable? Anything I can do about it?
[Graph](https://imgur.com/x9hVwfC)",1.7279601990049755,3.4893313731343305,3.382910447761194,90.6978482587065,78.55223880597015,8.048756218905472,24.59950248756219,8.841846274778883,1.685200995024876,250,9,57,6,6,83,49,67,0.047,0.713,0.24,0.9356,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,4,0,6,0,0,0,1,9,9,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,11,2,7,8,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,2,37,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557803215717788,0.0,0.2905769521569167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32618889452346866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34080067864748403,0.24014058719310366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20833767855703647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1708198424014519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23972536850300105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35387332122854154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.560937675888817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,stupidemobxtch,2020/04/18,"just another stupid vent just a stupid vent

ughh i can’t cope I can’t cope I cannot fucking cope. I have one (1) blade and it’s so dull and shit so all I have is a bunch of stupid cat scratches and it’s not like I can even go buy more because of fucking corona. Also, I can’t even go see camhs/ totally fall apart because it’s inconvenient. I don’t know how much more of this I can take. I was discharged from ip way way too soon because of the corona situation so even though I told them I was going to try and c0mm1t su1c1d3 as soon as I left they still let me leave. Then when I attempted 2 days later my camhs team were like “wHy dIdnT yOu rEaCh oUt.!1!1!!!1” like hoe I tried but you didn’t fucking listen as usual. Anyway I got ignored by the mh team at general because of corona and sent home again. I cried for 2 days straight and then I had to get my shit together, at least on the outside because I had to get my parents off my back. Since then I’ve been hardcore relapsing w my ed, so low restricting for a few days then b/p ing non stop. I’ve even started smoking again ffs. I am already falling apart on the inside but if this shit lasts too much longer I don’t fucking know what I’m going to do. I can’t attempt rn. I just can’t. It’s too fucking inconvenient. Fuck this. I cannot do this for much longer. I can’t I can’t I can’t I can’t I can’t.",-0.9196979865771802,1.182117348993291,1.4517416107382566,97.92358557046984,93.6308724832215,4.322281879194631,18.859395973154363,5.985473137389443,-0.26546738255033603,1062,34,252,10,40,357,147,298,0.225,0.7659999999999999,0.008,-0.9954,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,2,2,4,25,18,12,0,7,0,31,9,3,1,2,22,53,24,0,1,7,1,1,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,9,6,0,3,2,2,1,7,17,15,0,1,11,3,39,3,22,41,10,38,0,2,1,6,10,10,9,1,22,158,48,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029531273372307,0.07992853121497306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10480439157271752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07685398846705423,0.0,0.30463744386231045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1097883932104766,0.1933749416008394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640593467253324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5544029451576388,0.10443760784666543,0.0,0.2272114381168026,0.0,0.07993769776615309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10025618357417704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098578224067607,0.08147111453527453,0.0,0.1058307015423286,0.1085940005836264,0.10220379569362936,0.0,0.1464889107686864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204202589079393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06772748003898571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098063662183746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07964576687724775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3077861413842801,0.08267817537886585,0.11234595291895033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07074384311979108,0.0,0.0798187534248989,0.08356116199605633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07514859996956143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09819858894281006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09550477847041174,0.0,0.1357165201072828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11007881041120099,0.0,0.0,0.15866844160114574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09018769528283296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thisbread_,2020/04/18,"Please help: What am I supposed to do every day?? What is a normal person's day like?? How do they decide how to spend it??? **Seriously. What does a person do?? Chronically feeling like I ""don't know what to do with myself""**

I have ups and downs and whatnot, but I can't help feeling terribly confused about what a life... looks like? Even on ""good"" days I don't know what to do with myself. I make list after list, schedule and outline, morning and evening routine plans, but they fall apart, last a week, are met with extreme uncertainty, no matter how complicated or simple. I just can't decide what a normal day is like. (I won't get too much into how I feel about it, because it's complex and I'm working with my psychologist on it, making progress) (Symptom disclosure: dissociation and compartmentalization makes things more complicated)

When I get up in the morning. Then what?? How do I decide between doing this or that? How do some people decide so easily? Do I then commit to doing that every day? For how long do I do each thing? What is leisure time supposed to look like, and when, and for how long? How do I do it when I'm the one setting it arbitrarily? How do I compensate for days when I'm less capable? How do I keep it going? How does a person decide when to adapt or change their days or plans????

Seriously, I'm at a loss.",1.3239790076335858,3.8804646183206164,3.276407442748096,86.15522185114504,86.02290076335878,5.565076335877863,21.546278625954198,7.04035,0.7758202290076337,1038,35,205,15,32,348,123,262,0.053,0.797,0.15,0.9697,0,0,0,0,0,0,59.0,0,0,3,5,24,11,0,1,9,0,27,3,0,15,1,54,46,34,0,2,7,0,3,5,0,1,3,0,0,3,21,14,0,1,11,0,1,2,6,5,0,1,1,5,22,6,26,44,5,33,0,1,2,0,9,9,0,6,26,150,43,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07130655820342788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12374349116237453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5280720445625798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2047303140724167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1545210836339231,0.0,0.19711209146052894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17743743760622455,0.08356659295493139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12222867727827552,0.0,0.0664792935134196,0.0981126452640183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15681105846401613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10397229380838284,0.0,0.0,0.1285722317688914,0.09534981479711707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08262253562858976,0.2857391152537069,0.0,0.0,0.2070374703073097,0.19645820736504588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23424412416538046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08598970315753189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22922031166839466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07926493598656613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08109537701007823,0.3064128159844741,0.0,0.12840285390751116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.121581275005673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15542529560415794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06820876084547102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0938298732659133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0851588156900513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gayguy06,2020/04/18,"Idiotic People - Chemical Safety I'm amazed how retarded some of our elders are, specifically people 40+.

To begin my mother feels it's very safe to mix bleach with windex to clean things. When told about the potential health effects as I am a working in the field of HealthCare/Reserach and have a University Degree, she mentions that she knows how the world works and she's been alive all this time. Mind you my mother has a Masters Degree and works in Engineering, so I don't understand how retarded she can be.

This again I noted in my fellow co-workers that were trying to Mix Bleach and Floor Cleaner for a Biohazard Spill. When I noted that there is a risk of Chlorine Gas exposure and death, people always tread on the line that I'm Crazy and over reacting.

This is again noted in working in other fields where older people seem completely unaware of Chemical safety, and don't really care.

Can any of you folks please give me some insight as to why people that are 40+ appear to think that they are invinsible and that Chemical safety doesn't apply to them? Are they just getting a level of ignorance as they age? What exactly is going on here?",7.561484848484845,7.334171754545458,7.811818181818182,71.70939393939395,63.27272727272727,10.969696969696967,32.42424242424242,10.504223727775694,3.36910606060606,926,31,162,20,12,303,131,220,0.11800000000000001,0.779,0.10400000000000001,-0.6468,0,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,1,2,4,6,13,6,1,1,10,0,18,1,0,5,2,29,32,17,1,0,1,2,1,0,1,0,1,0,1,0,14,9,0,2,7,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,3,1,19,3,27,28,3,22,0,0,0,0,17,12,0,4,8,111,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13095665297408482,0.0,0.0,0.10702697231414003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16046415984933726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650148317622368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07957841785662721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082226994080861,0.1509777161773831,0.08944533469477951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672925442019013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08649449847644526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15891365102321195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5455535667960697,0.0,0.0,0.17276110554941188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10082464944432594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14327709229703706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10455938120448484,0.10084574139903638,0.0,0.0,0.09177226652849103,0.0,0.0,0.15038779642502556,0.0,0.10685385969315753,0.0,0.0,0.16384299157697393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298588351194996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420151847421844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5728895697477661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mydadleftmetwice,2020/04/18,"Manic and need help TLDR;I’m manically obsessing over my future and struggling to keep my anger ( which I pride on being able to control) in check


getting so tired of being manic during this lockdown, and my main problem is constantly obsessing over my future and literally planning out ever single item I will buy for my theoretical house by wishlisting every single item, name something you’d buy randomly and I’ve definitely saved the link and wishlisted it and stayed up till 6am saving link after link.

Im (m19) noticeably aggy with everyone including my girlfriend ( who I’m currently living with due to being at her flat when the lockdown in the uk started) and I really don’t mean to be but the mania levels are slowly climbing and I know I’m gonna lose control. How DO I STOP THIS, it’s such a battle just staying sane and seeming okay but the intrusive thoughts are starting to scream at me.",8.248119658119661,7.952130958579882,8.63037475345168,66.6323602892834,61.89940828402366,11.29809335963182,37.712689020381326,10.746095033038511,4.288608941485865,728,32,117,16,9,242,117,169,0.15,0.795,0.055,-0.9487,1,2,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,0,6,6,12,2,3,6,1,11,1,0,3,1,35,23,16,0,2,3,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,0,0,6,13,0,4,7,0,3,1,1,8,0,0,1,1,14,4,21,15,5,25,0,1,0,0,6,10,0,2,12,80,20,0,0.17662240654662378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19086607521743895,0.3961940949002059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15976507854502786,0.14881199517746133,0.16877027844224804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227791759961372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183862760676587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2037985433765716,0.0,0.0,0.19078250762748694,0.0,0.0,0.15699011024801532,0.0,0.0,0.09706705556304772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1559608208531616,0.0,0.0,0.1975952946637627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1923935793620153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13096327647993442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20108578049875966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16900378968808746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11314883630896345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.160790405446374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1359725575496501,0.0,0.0,0.2500284968484756,0.3765119700394669,0.0,0.14766424050081794,0.0,0.1846440881583872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1402184618837601,0.0,0.20300147411973068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cmtvegan,2020/04/18,"How do I stop myself from being triggered by my neighbours noise? I lived in a flat for four months where my neighbours directly beneath me kept their TV on all night every night. I became incredibly sleep deprived and essentially experienced sleep torture. I moved out of there and have now lived in my current flat for six months but every time I hear my neighbours TV downstairs, I physically cannot stay in the living room. It has gotten to the point where I can only be in the bedroom. Since quarantine, they are now home all day and with their TV on and it's having a huge detrimental impact on my mental health and my ability to function. How I do I live a normal life and have a reasonable mental reaction with this incessant noise?

Thank you",6.426635367762129,7.251201507042258,6.518262910798125,76.43182316118937,65.61971830985915,9.409702660406886,31.27073552425665,9.444778638647367,2.8074106416275426,602,22,107,11,9,192,90,142,0.046,0.885,0.07,0.6452,1,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,3,0,7,3,1,0,7,0,11,4,2,4,2,19,15,9,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,2,1,3,0,3,9,0,2,1,3,0,1,1,2,0,2,2,2,21,1,18,11,2,26,0,1,0,0,8,14,0,0,10,78,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939325570804768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25970185125287193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16382005499921118,0.1737020044543497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15459275759012656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088579868386606,0.0,0.0,0.5443554983613055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3106290637554049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24603077596379805,0.16380287158679815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892583016103163,0.1510027589985844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11721356067215807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14569117226893205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15845880583126906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12748786826582426,0.0,0.30845828026993816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1642691093575987,0.0,0.1288494135710638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14189099891532675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08986735076463022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cheese2thecracker,2020/04/18,"I wouldn’t care if my boyfriend died Sounds harsh but I love him for how he makes me feel, but I don’t know if I’m truly capable of loving anyone . I couldn’t break up with him because it would break his heart and he might become suicidal, but I’m honestly always going to be a person who wants to be on their own. Any advice? I sound like a psychopath I’m aware but I’m autistic if that makes any difference",0.8898850574712611,2.9682345402298864,2.557011494252876,93.94747126436785,82.9080459770115,5.705747126436782,18.86206896551724,6.937597516519254,0.11735862068965465,323,8,72,4,9,106,60,87,0.10400000000000001,0.622,0.27399999999999997,0.9598,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,1,0,1,5,0,0,2,0,7,3,1,3,0,19,20,9,2,7,7,0,1,1,0,3,0,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,3,11,5,7,14,1,5,0,0,0,2,10,2,0,4,1,40,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21695760361113028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18474032380257369,0.0,0.0,0.30196552938530064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15524314129865538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353427218905769,0.2452061661940144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263665127050921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2304240751005451,0.23196602883291226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11226113640396024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12618037891830616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26309747223192564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201763936988998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1084688718216184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4007675542450156,0.0,0.2964031934806692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355305544758568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19386129215578754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24285633997159736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1309544938578401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15771825844261825,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ava0powell,2020/04/18,"I hate myself, but I don’t want to get better. Okay so I’m new to reddit, but I came here because idk where else to go. So I don’t have any mental illnesses or anything but I hate myself a lot. Anytime I look in the mirror I see all the things I want to improve. I know that I need to love myself and accept who I am but when I google different ways to help yourself and get better at accepting and loving yourself it’s like I don’t want to listen. I don’t want to not hate myself. I feel like it’s embarrassing to love yourself and I am getting to the point where I don’t listen to any compliments that I am given. I only listen to the voice in my head that hates my body and everything about it. I don’t know if this is normal or if anyone can relate, I just don’t know how to get better. So if anyone can give advice on what to do that would be great. I’m just not ready to talk to my friends or family about this.",1.2128094820017594,2.583424129353233,3.4629675153643578,91.29381913959615,78.85074626865672,6.122446590576531,19.286215978928887,6.794906146795322,0.07562546093064082,714,15,164,7,17,246,95,201,0.11800000000000001,0.586,0.29600000000000004,0.992,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,12,19,4,1,5,1,17,6,2,1,1,36,48,20,0,10,14,0,1,2,1,1,1,4,0,0,12,6,0,0,6,0,0,2,9,5,0,0,2,7,28,14,22,44,2,12,0,0,2,3,11,7,0,7,4,113,40,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168380468947096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1626173136855923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16720598975314088,0.0,0.09839223914915199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288603406337411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3172379705074673,0.0,0.13281034377501774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1367511075875412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1249205250410913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0998816535372763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10745778393150376,0.0,0.11271573558672444,0.0,0.060455921808247735,0.08541763470474795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923760277543126,0.0,0.2498722069913981,0.11469814617893365,0.06795184305074503,0.0,0.0,0.13182141303690015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4721848074840887,0.12270872295201307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014225084399458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19713025632741085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11682735171822607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004049273643795,0.0,0.0,0.1016503333591218,0.3237376624560603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12049392674197693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08865632152334907,0.0,0.11547712877295105,0.0,0.0,0.11714882799852132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093496932996846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11302806779309288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09527824295037082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09610223965711767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943402174451095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820913771127281,0.09490554815506033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08493591821330937,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Adolf_H8,2020/04/18,"Since we don't have insane asylums anymore, what do we do with all the people who are too mentally ill to fit into society, but haven't actually committed any crime to warrant them going to jail? Sometimes I feel like I should be in some sort of long term institution, honestly... surely it's less cruel than being thrown out homeless on the street?",9.480454545454542,7.710053409090911,9.438484848484851,66.57772727272727,60.36363636363636,12.436363636363636,38.66666666666667,11.20814326018867,4.345975757575758,279,11,48,6,3,92,57,66,0.18100000000000002,0.684,0.135,-0.6718,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,2,0,1,0,1,4,1,0,2,0,9,1,0,0,3,13,11,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,5,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,5,3,10,8,4,9,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,2,3,34,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.3336167584295901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2324839878654335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33904414607686645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17286023823067884,0.2442326945405945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19429315485787546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1670208909718153,0.0,0.0,0.3025450569182181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3445255362747036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23701029013637676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2827992052758303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33811913823499234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3222093502923057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AgitatedSpinach5,2020/04/18,im crying so hard please help me,-2.1225000000000023,-0.3896982499999986,0.8049999999999997,103.54,94.0,3.2,8.0,3.1291,-2.39865,26,0,7,0,1,9,8,8,0.368,0.222,0.41,0.1471,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4998107348779426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40760253541913133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3049858179893369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4914924354371302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4994679560833908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dirkcaber255sn,2020/04/18,"My intrusive thoughts are killing me I am a 22 y.o. gay male. I haven't been diagnosed, but I suspect that I have a very severe case of OCD.

Whenever I hear about illnesses or perverted fetishes, I can't stop thinking that I'm might have them myself. Over and over again. No logical argumention helps. It's just a vicious train of thoughts and anxiety.

I also think that I might be autistic (many symptoms overlap). I am socially awkward, rarely feel empathy, constantly do repetitive moves like pacing around the room while daydreaming (I can do this for hours with music or the same movie trailers), etc. Maladaptive dreaming is linked to OCD. 

On top of that, I suffer from a very strong libido. I constantly have an urge to masturbate, which makes me think that I'm an addict. My addiction leads to kinky fetishes (for example, I really enjoy verbal degradation). I've read one study, which states that people with autism are more prone to that. 

I am in the middle of a severe depression. I try to watch movies, read books in my free time to distract myself from my obtrusive, but nothing helps.

Do I need professional help?",5.3577355072463755,7.277990507246379,5.530987318840584,78.45126358695654,69.04830917874396,9.619444444444444,31.29498792270532,9.978442167317967,3.3389712560386466,893,38,157,23,16,282,134,207,0.19899999999999998,0.665,0.136,-0.9339,0,0,0,0,0,0,35.0,0,0,1,3,5,11,2,2,10,0,19,6,0,2,0,26,30,8,1,1,5,0,1,1,0,2,5,1,1,1,11,5,0,1,9,4,1,2,3,7,0,1,3,3,25,5,23,24,3,21,0,2,1,1,7,10,0,4,9,103,36,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965602431416464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10877385690252467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10405369563193358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12108520418529865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2939751151585813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11715243952514848,0.13805580212898574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516964590762341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877498460215754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1533026104276291,0.0,0.2735107779148622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.133950714791959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15048419512743616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06645171453192274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907933311591892,0.13790129797373613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2885880328010512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14456602207142266,0.0,0.10085591229576504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13051331311526482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0921695808761361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09429802493347046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2721103959194437,0.0,0.08713686323274865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30732412797051395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386536188464337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11371746408202503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137518715158412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2614652753366204,0.0,0.21596681564640505,0.07931341672026522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234755795620538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244588325917297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,I_StarDust,2020/04/18,"Just checked out depressionquest.com... It got too real for me too fast. I was minding my own business and just strolling around online. And i see this thing ""depression quest"" which is about how a depressed person might experience their life. I decided to check it out. After a few min of reading i had to stop. Because i could see myself in every single situation and see myself react the same way. I didn't think that was what depression felt like. I didnt think that i had the same feelings and made the same decisions like a depressed person would.

I'm feeling... something, right now. Its like a hole in my chest. And i dont know what to do. It's been like this ever since i can remember.",2.512057569296374,5.0223070074626905,3.4652452025586378,87.26626865671642,79.67164179104478,6.216631130063965,23.750533049040516,7.447530270364453,1.1328801705756932,545,19,106,8,14,174,86,134,0.12300000000000001,0.802,0.076,-0.802,0,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,1,0,9,8,0,0,7,0,14,2,1,3,1,32,26,6,0,2,2,0,3,4,0,2,1,0,0,2,12,8,0,1,9,1,2,0,3,4,0,0,10,6,16,4,12,13,6,13,0,4,3,0,3,6,0,1,10,79,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12943182378113766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08863106467114075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11608558174532492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.500911866488488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17040113075945731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1315175408808099,0.12250103613093835,0.0,0.0,0.142223602834721,0.0,0.0,0.1470315344879716,0.0,0.13960140588039616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11628516787936725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07990494896915179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10269635056147107,0.2841294000574369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13757567803904344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15424046091415816,0.14680687672834294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539055293447117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14543372598919554,0.1654906355540526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.164703489831775,0.1241660062737009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.347581490248643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027173376967093,0.1634293751361852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11193169720856327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155621218079055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659356567823428,0.1863256961352451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11540729145541626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.103283996129094,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,amongthewildflowers9,2020/04/18,"[Canada] Any suggestions for online counselling available in Canada? Apps like Better Health and Talkspace are American and do not have registered Canadian providers. The apps seems great because you can text, email, call, video whatever is best at the time and not have to wait for, set and keep appointments.

You also pay a monthly subscription fee instead of by the hour. 


I have benefits that will help with the cost if they are a “Registered Psychologist or counselor with MSW registres with their provincial regulatory body.”

Thanks!",8.000850722311398,10.676769887640448,6.339357945425363,72.25808988764047,63.606741573033716,10.478972712680578,36.30979133226325,10.608840637214634,4.531952166934191,436,21,65,12,7,128,71,89,0.013999999999999999,0.768,0.218,0.9674,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,2,2,2,6,0,0,6,0,9,2,1,0,0,14,13,7,0,1,4,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,7,0,2,1,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,5,6,10,12,1,6,0,0,0,0,8,2,0,3,4,42,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2211149610572662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18802779017957905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1685503174205241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901670810992439,0.2445395807029553,0.0,0.307126404772474,0.0,0.0,0.2823348748017505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30483948393834404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29390392645581026,0.0,0.0,0.1853304544846739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722943538846744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2457636936331681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1350827183050234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2206976767437852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25171295109511604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2545617611357318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16122792322364662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Rover-6428,2020/04/18,"Is this the right place to post this? I find it really hard to let go

My friends are really nice people and I cherish their company but GOD FORBID them having me as an attorney as they are tried after death. The thing is that I find it really hard to let go of seemingly small things that happen now and then and keep having these awful relapses where I suddenly remember all the evil things humanity has done to me ever.

For example once in boarding school I had no lunch and was hungry, so I asked my friend to order a pizza for me (for my money and in exchange for a slice) as I did not know the pizza delivery address at the time. My other “friend” however noticed only the giving a slice to the other friend bit and so asked if he could have some too. Me, seeing this as an opportunity to strengthen our friendship, agreed. The only problem is that when the pizza arrived, HE TOOK HALF THE F*CKING THING AND RAN OFF. As a result I only had 2 small slices left and was left hungry for the rest of the day.

The other example happened during a paintball match we had for the pizza stealing friend’s birthday. Me and my group had to storm an enemy fortification and I reckoned that of all 5 of us attack at the same time from different sides, we would be able to take it. The only problem is that those bastards betrayed me at the last second as I charged, leaving me to be pounded with some 25-30 pellets to the torso and knees. To add insult to injury, they started laughing as I laid there, shocked with fury and pain. THEN to add more injury and insults into the fire, one of my “friends” that was in the fort, decided to make sure I was dead by firing a volley at my knees just as I was recovering. We ended up losing the match anyway and the best they had to offer to me after the fact was that they called me a “champ”

Yeah, I guess I need help as these memories surface up from time to time and make me very upset",6.209419642857143,5.671806489583336,6.87528273809524,78.33906250000003,66.13541666666666,9.501785714285717,30.26488095238095,8.841846274778883,2.273647470238095,1508,46,296,21,21,499,197,384,0.221,0.64,0.139,-0.9928,2,0,0,0,0,0,28.0,5,0,6,4,10,26,5,1,33,2,29,8,2,3,5,53,48,31,2,6,4,0,4,0,6,1,1,0,1,1,23,23,5,2,7,0,2,4,2,13,0,3,15,5,43,13,56,27,9,42,0,1,1,0,29,20,1,5,16,226,66,2,0.0950285524824567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17767773731891506,0.10810869721605723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09972660303455627,0.0,0.10374656713153317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703477691370238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07587256661354999,0.0,0.0,0.061285554835184976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09928461154778746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972472023982685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08416709153073787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08595876620768539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1737087507631625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4405129435165767,0.0,0.0,0.09116004663669867,0.10801383261926296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10468466417316426,0.0,0.16806687024724482,0.0,0.17025383502868416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06369563561307484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446574374464813,0.0,0.0,0.05222520723301142,0.07746095356514686,0.0,0.1006215160391338,0.2064976006439623,0.1943462665894486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10631264286553116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1268645933816863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704624675633253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10819063684628198,0.0,0.10120230699737104,0.0643938065203812,0.2890939852539388,0.10111707985245263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06588083308071277,0.0,0.09928461154778746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09101108496006027,0.0,0.0,0.18185898167873754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18263317219625053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1076488252534322,0.08115386459282864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09617396844453238,0.0757254529403525,0.08651042515719996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726169855635825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08956328609799159,0.0,0.07144964501753125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25253099088362185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2216476526075848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1055802183619118,0.06451814929757625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11430764807933695,0.0,0.0,0.07840850799314386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0675055571811692,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThrowAwayAccount-351,2020/04/18,"Calling myself out on my toxicity So I just realized that I have a really bad coping skill of stirring the pot about issues I haven’t dealt with yet when I’m really anxious or triggered. And it happens in ways that the root issues don’t appear all that obviously to me right away. Which sucks, because it doesn’t actually make me feel better at all to react so strongly or drag others into it, all it does is make me feel less alone in my misery. Which now I can also recognize that this coping skill is something I’ve learned from my grandmother who raised me, which equally sucks. 

No wonder my SO is miserable with me. Of course I haven’t been really aware of it when I’m doing it, until recently. The issues I’m having which I’m using this coping skill for are largely out of my control, and finding acceptance with that and letting it go is so difficult. 

I definitely try to cling to the familiarity that comes with emotional chaos, because without it I kinda have face myself and see how much I’m hurting and how much of the hurt is due to things that were done to me in the past. Those things are totally beyond my control now. All the childhood abuse and neglect and the things I never knew were all that wrong, which now take so much effort to function through in my adulthood. The hurt from it isn’t something I want to face, subconsciously I would prefer to take myself back to the time where all the pain still felt comfortable and normal. 

I know I’m probably making myself sound like a really bad person, but I don’t enjoy being this way. I’m in therapy, on meds, really trying to improve myself and now I can see that this is part of why my progress has been stunted these past few months. 

Anyone relate or have any advice for me??",7.745407305779453,6.560738653061229,8.035091750986108,73.39145086606074,63.34402332361515,10.75280397873435,33.296004115932085,9.773937934552695,3.0284475733150398,1390,45,259,23,17,458,169,343,0.11199999999999999,0.812,0.076,-0.7838,0,1,2,0,1,0,26.0,0,0,0,9,21,18,2,1,13,0,30,3,2,11,9,60,58,24,0,4,6,0,3,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,34,17,0,3,11,0,0,3,9,12,0,0,7,6,33,6,42,48,14,38,0,5,2,0,3,15,2,6,19,200,67,1,0.0,0.11567634894327378,0.09527342555318888,0.0,0.0,0.09540353578163238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10111590374569174,0.0,0.07807519106071176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06639218609541317,0.0,0.0,0.11029483872382384,0.0,0.06826561659616093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09172720422632533,0.07507193917031392,0.16303502009316048,0.11902946931341155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08634637110939249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969180370178496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410015535010558,0.0,0.0,0.21900213881326044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08543723484341573,0.09991004586590573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10982133423438037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09872997457142348,0.0,0.09374072916197464,0.0,0.08923264026136016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05548574511658636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08633445642051925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135468722538082,0.0,0.0,0.30570308257504136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05365524890512949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983394858649976,0.0,0.04769740134379039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19550763977169333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10844563668484708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07792784891639963,0.0,0.21530927149909987,0.0,0.07529877170635467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09565730257203822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10388588912317,0.0,0.0,0.10572447385785204,0.18639899445170202,0.0,0.0852473129082319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10526234737080656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31272345391891937,0.0,0.09639848310495698,0.0,0.0,0.08337603688031005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15559796662329098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15032167973519708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07796795873948703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14681218862356354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1116491504764562,0.0,0.19458438592209698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056929213879597484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256959781948374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08432153020725229,0.0,0.0,0.05758508359506542,0.1549893223984851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0880964711035921,0.0,0.0,0.09411245725238238,0.10587626921684704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935400862795639,0.10674378334566588,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cheoerry,2020/04/18,how do i accept that my parents aren’t going to understand my mental health i’m 19 so it’s not like i really need their permission to see a therapist but i just can’t it out of my head that they will just never fully understand it. i just want to accept it and make peace with it so i can move on because it’s really putting a strain on my relationship with them.,2.5211538461538474,3.708853166666668,4.759487179487183,84.09384615384619,75.02564102564101,8.78974358974359,23.256410256410252,9.2995712137729,1.724241025641026,289,8,63,7,6,101,51,78,0.046,0.802,0.152,0.84,2,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,3,0,6,4,0,1,2,0,5,2,1,2,1,18,13,5,0,2,5,1,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,4,0,0,3,4,1,0,0,0,1,12,3,9,12,0,7,0,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,2,46,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1415142138475659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13193407725351286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23824905119263415,0.2467606334750354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11341494325183545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15495944045383234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339488426750008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467347502598679,0.0,0.17213352056012504,0.17904551777265595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25777096447375963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2333711244708096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29743769497287,0.0,0.0,0.24923821981906955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1849905241952869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2695397166359967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4833449163542518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692588703130265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ad3quat3,2020/04/18,"I have come to a terrifying understanding of our world and I feel I’ve gone from a happy productive person to someone who doesn’t believe they are even alive We are all made of neutrons and protons. Just atoms floating together making proteins which make dna which make us. Our minds are just slow evolution to solve problems. Everything is physical. It’s terrifying. When I look outside at the plants, all I see is matter and I don’t see that they are “alive,” just proteins working in chemical and electric impulses. Even my fucking mother who I’ve loved all my life, now seems just like a collection of atoms. Love doesn’t seem real it’s just evolution. I feel this may be the end of me and I’m not even in my 20’s. I just wish I could stop but maybe it’s too late",1.8792156862745093,4.392694045751636,3.1905882352941184,88.21764705882354,82.39869281045752,6.737254901960785,24.68627450980393,7.928766900206844,1.5531333333333333,611,24,123,12,17,198,94,153,0.057,0.825,0.11800000000000001,0.7096,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,4,0,2,1,12,6,1,0,5,0,13,4,0,4,3,35,32,7,0,3,8,1,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,9,7,0,1,5,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,2,5,18,4,11,27,3,12,0,0,3,3,12,4,1,3,7,78,27,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18107443961943007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844454782466056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12832045080885207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423486723930778,0.0,0.0,0.3184586798238922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14444320662148769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16252796001837352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14858143923147588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1710875735975927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18129719479625736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11352005823929633,0.07851882239649309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1349628583291182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901090044136478,0.15207550120249547,0.3218420545334312,0.0,0.16146309160887826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16227962439770618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033298321169746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15378566690326506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1829325626805906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2561432858467497,0.2926237308506928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13617605798550492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13436765971398254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16731337403747773,0.1933242749932304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848180643777043,0.0,0.0,0.1170048055675864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fun1girly,2020/04/18,"Made this film on gaslighting and emotional abuse after I saw what happened to my friend. Hey guys! I'm Tatjana and I'm a film maker. Last year I've decided to make a film on gaslighting, because a close friend of mine experienced a terrible emotionally destructive relationship with her ex which, took her a long time to recover from. I really hope to raise awareness on gaslighting with this film and hope to help the victims recognise its signs early on.   
The film won a few awards, so I decided to put it up on vimeo on demand and try to raise some money for a domestic abuse charity, since they've really been struggling with an overwhelming amount of cases during the lockdown.   
I really hope the film can make a difference: [Your Reality](https://vimeo.com/ondemand/yourreality)",8.683214285714287,9.177818464285714,8.429285714285715,65.79821428571432,60.78571428571429,12.428571428571427,36.785714285714285,11.93303328291395,4.7726428571428565,635,27,103,19,8,204,87,140,0.142,0.667,0.191,0.7712,0,1,0,0,2,0,21.0,0,1,0,2,1,12,2,2,13,0,2,0,0,4,0,19,14,5,0,3,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,6,8,0,0,2,6,1,2,0,5,0,0,5,2,9,7,22,9,3,16,0,1,1,0,10,8,0,4,6,59,15,1,0.0,0.3754915127723968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09659397946356812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655539471376023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3564858270775177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24484712997465566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15689744491828028,0.1401230931900377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10621045625089083,0.0,0.0,0.4721509719809847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12916368822755764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022955012076288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14993594253321502,0.211542693866874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15929315502402386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30453503381838504,0.0,0.0,0.1701236280948578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13107735335123555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16565376915922328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09239761124841572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17605167222768847,0.10758197178508176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204117934466113
mentalhealth,MyNamesMando,2020/04/18,"The Start of Becoming Better There is a lot I want to open with. First, is why I'm posting this. To be honest there are many reasons why. To start I'm bored as hell sitting inside all day, another is to maybe talk and learn from new people. In all, I just want to become better. Maybe I can build a community of like-minded people (Sounds mad corny lmao)

**Things I do that have contributed to better health and overall a happier way of life.**

\-Enjoy hot beverages. I started to drink tea! (Recommendations wanted!).

\-Let myself have alone time.

\-Track my calories/macros and eat a diet of whole foods.

\-A workout routine that works for me.

\- Broke through the first step and started putting EFFORT into my wellbeing.

\-Accepting my physical appearance. (Easier said than done)

**Things I Like**

\-Computers and phones.

\-Learning a lot about random topics.

\-Diet and physical fitness. (Know the most about this one) (If anyone would like advice/help pm me)

\-Competition 

\-Skin-Care

\-Becoming the best I possibly can at something 

\-Grooming/taking care of yourself.

\-Some anime. (kinda mainstream... sue me) (Mha, Death Note, Erased,)

\-Shows (Stranger Things, Riverdale even though it's atrocious, Gravity Falls)

**Things I want to do for myself**

\-Saving and start investing money. (Any tips would be welcome idk anything)

\-Read more.

\-Get a notebook and write everything in it such as my emotions or random ideas.

\-Mindfulness/meditation

Feel free to ask or say anything! I really like talking!

​

​

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mentalhealth,FiddleSticks2000,2020/04/18,"The world is ugly. Literally. Throwaway account.

These last 2-3 years I’ve been having a serious issue. No matter where I go, I get anxious and an existential crisis due to how ugly my brain perceives everything to be, even when I know it’s objectively beautiful. 

For example, I used to love hiking and being in nature, but I don’t know what happened, and nowadays I hate being outside my apartment because everything is so ugly and depressing. I’ve been to forests, mountains, beaches, cities and everything is so ugly to me. Another example, I was in Barcelona for 2 weeks for work, and I just felt the need to get out the entire time, even though I think nobody would say Barcelona is ugly. Lovely city, but I hated it. Krakow? Lovely city, hated it. Hamburg? Lovely city, hated it.

I can’t do tasks downtown without getting an existential crisis because it’s so ugly. So here I am in my apartment never going out anymore, except for work. (Or well, before the whole corona thing at least..)

Interestingly I’m not really depressed in general. I have a lovely girlfriend, a stable job I like, a stable living situation and no traumatic experiences in the past. I don’t think I’m a very unhappy person. I just can’t go outside anymore without feeling sad. And as an extroverted person, that drives me insane.

The only times I’ve felt happy outside is when I’ve been to work trips to northern Norway and in the Utrecht-area, and when I’m drunk.

Is there some psychological phenomenon for this? I just want to see and feel beauty again.",3.962419871794872,6.3133273680555595,5.569583333333334,74.86067307692309,73.93055555555556,7.625213675213676,29.13247863247864,8.502166056373571,2.5933462606837607,1214,52,200,23,26,411,154,288,0.231,0.597,0.172,-0.9708,1,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,0,3,19,17,4,0,15,0,22,7,1,2,1,41,53,24,0,3,10,0,4,1,1,1,0,1,0,2,10,13,1,0,9,2,1,5,10,8,1,0,6,6,22,9,27,43,3,30,0,3,1,5,9,13,0,2,13,136,32,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10355522165785154,0.0,0.1115671882966822,0.19588061839500925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12040258065924432,0.0,0.08403484911291254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11024536258267804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1701183485492157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13045600365895166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2662690046908057,0.09660319931557597,0.0,0.0,0.09986891309681373,0.0,0.18964422456194746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15478921447399402,0.0,0.16837746837921908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08733040156192938,0.10512855768097457,0.0,0.3900079768350401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307654698127708,0.0980009859792154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1085484203425543,0.08050005536799286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04824763351175417,0.0,0.08720415305037632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4456597951994599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07322699087925091,0.07616741035822518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510907350218488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09427463675058302,0.0,0.17246143375455242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06326619970953304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07853545162842514,0.0,0.0,0.07869646413967635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11100689467590018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06560969692675096,0.12655886929178728,0.09702815399109778,0.0,0.11517188651757332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08529425444515251,0.0,0.08148478613113526,0.05824937901779737,0.0,0.07921682920045009,0.0,0.08879431438595622,0.0,0.0,0.11025855335284587,0.0,0.1903962571744894,0.0,0.21568860073955068,0.0,0.0,0.07015406912285183,0.0,0.0,0.06359620648636717
mentalhealth,daramichele98,2020/04/18,"Bipolar? Or something else... Ever since I was a young girl, my parents have told me I was bipolar. I distinctly remember my Dad telling me that he saw it in me ever since I was around the age of eight. They would tell me that I was manic. For years, I thought that this was my lot in life, and to be quite honest, it could be. I just wish my folks had taken me to see someone when I was a child to help me, but because I'm in my early 20's, it is now up to me to find out what's wrong with my brain. When I examine the criteria for bipolar disorder, I really don't fit the criteria for bipolar one or two. I've never had a manic episode or depressive episode. I've never had extreme highs or lows; the only thing I can really relate to is maybe the racing thoughts. When I was a child, I was very hyper...still am. I've always struggled in school, but I got relatively good grades so no one really worried. Being in college, I realize how much help I required. College is killing me. My focus is shot; I'll walk out of class just because I need to move.  I get bored easily. My mind will zone out and think about something completely different. I'm forgetful. I have terrible perception of time. I get frustrated easily. I feel like I'm working harder than everyone and only getting 10% of what everyone else gets. It's hard to explain. This has me doubting I'll ever reach my goals. I know what I have to do (find a psychiatrist) but I just felt like ranting. Quarantine has really made me think my life through. I want to be a mental health counselor, and I need to figure myself out before I help someone else.",2.3082970171356045,4.184785061349694,4.141377194838167,85.39309815950924,77.22085889570552,7.564036386714617,26.27205415697059,8.433251757073789,1.8801107679289195,1254,49,255,25,29,424,166,326,0.152,0.752,0.096,-0.9718,2,1,2,0,0,0,47.0,0,0,1,4,14,13,2,2,11,0,31,8,1,2,6,54,56,16,1,6,10,2,3,2,0,2,7,0,0,3,13,10,0,1,15,0,0,2,4,9,0,4,19,5,49,4,33,30,2,30,0,2,2,0,14,14,0,6,16,169,62,8,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08265909287646432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08843393402724672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12111385742575845,0.0,0.08453128395196882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108966357081512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041564211886822,0.0,0.0,0.07931515123312888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556166030197655,0.0,0.0,0.10378947663843588,0.11385259752760332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.248958236679012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26957698332396257,0.0,0.18984783972209446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050229443737194034,0.07096873471179126,0.09538227274471102,0.0,0.18159048062093072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2076048398099301,0.0,0.0,0.08332193580477071,0.0794515179047482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898940207268964,0.0,0.0,0.10559410029715302,0.0,0.0,0.1997571400453612,0.1049584878292616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10990533049502647,0.0,0.05459483440129252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.140333992446078,0.09706531162833823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08445557602319875,0.0,0.0939981998247291,0.0,0.0,0.09980068998201552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10011166372016206,0.0,0.10030539068423773,0.0,0.0,0.1055830243212977,0.07302655541579592,0.1473191568570582,0.153234736798925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1346311250719901,0.15110555886288632,0.0,0.0,0.1103056540786915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10566064385249417,0.0,0.0,0.25455977602924035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1125332018690378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10053769356084977,0.07916136253506689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16435065594864434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16834143841250535,0.15295404232637222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10385205729906137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17365561271750554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599728540555694,0.12730651425778938,0.0,0.15773021365782675,0.05792613151134327,0.0,0.0,0.09492391986104723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09704104460138233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08196615650444543,0.058593486508952325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11423644971889807,0.0,0.0,0.07232092616647637,0.10088490320048843,0.0,0.07056850342459434,0.1086130303006934,0.0,0.06397190029512538
mentalhealth,FatFerret608,2020/04/18,"Not diagnosed, but Bi-Polar I believe.. I keep disassociating myself with this, and I'm having trouble even thinking of this..I can't get in for a visit to talk about help..But I need help..And information..Anything would help..",1.6505426356589157,4.410586651162792,3.94453488372093,79.54687984496125,89.4651162790698,5.657364341085271,23.44573643410853,7.1686216300943375,1.3511736434108528,178,7,32,3,6,61,34,43,0.10300000000000001,0.897,0.0,-0.5499,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,8,8,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,0,0,4,0,6,7,0,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25239355889418946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34555352859478683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113009404545089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2025769452535055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16024164135471874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6167372980803124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27261509142145546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2274192019741067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465193037023316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1965253297417618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21787570707996964,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,WrongResult,2020/04/18,"I’m tired of people telling me my mental disorder is all in my head! I need to let this out because I swear it’s driving me mad but my pet peeve is people telling me “it’s all in you’re head” or “it’s all in you’re mind” every time I voice anything I’m struggling with or talk about my mental illnesses some of the people I confine in are quick to just tell me it’s all in my head and not to think about it. Its extremely dismissive behavior and it’s invalidating it just makes me not want to talk about what I’m going through mentally at all. I know they mean no harm but it’s just please be more careful with you’re wording. The reason why it gets under my skin so much is because when anyone says “it’s all in you’re mind” i feel like they’re suggesting it’s psychosomatic. My symptoms are real my illness is real trust me if anyone with a mental illness could just say maybe it is all in my head and be cured we all would be fine!!  
I have bipolar disorder and DDD and I have been getting these comments from my friends who also have diagnosis of depression,OCD, anxiety and sleep disorder. I just don’t understand why they don’t understand how harmful comments like these are I know my hallucinations, delusions, and mood swings is my brain toying with me I understand that but In that moment those hallucinations are my reality I can’t just say hey it’s all in my head and it goes away. 

I just needed to let all this out I wanna find a way to talk to my friends and family without sounding rude or mean or insensitive but this is something I want to address what do you guys think? Have you experience anything similar? Or what are you’re opinions on it? :)",2.113164783934014,4.308020798816571,3.765492200107584,86.30876187914646,79.17751479289942,6.937206383360231,25.33118163887395,8.00094639256281,1.5370303747534515,1322,51,272,24,33,440,151,338,0.128,0.7759999999999999,0.096,-0.8059,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,1,2,2,0,15,13,2,1,4,0,28,14,8,3,10,75,50,23,0,8,20,0,2,2,2,1,6,5,2,1,28,16,0,1,12,1,0,2,7,5,0,0,1,7,42,7,37,42,13,22,0,0,0,0,22,15,0,8,6,186,70,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06582917335880895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06297256494745394,0.0,0.0,0.11511644219634895,0.0,0.1354803679856802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733988155133943,0.0,0.0,0.10035981294168822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918934121337429,0.0,0.0,0.08392804782555159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572372402619542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2830285229202549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06935593697808239,0.0,0.0,0.08052218615079537,0.07760149310108297,0.0,0.04162213709294114,0.05880754763962193,0.0,0.0,0.07523658751550882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12719639619379006,0.0,0.08601485962035968,0.0,0.04678286001736685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08150714107894455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4224068657333451,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09047895070891968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16835018190310144,0.0,0.08043222076481307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05494748560821963,0.0,0.08269886527382869,0.17933550248159855,0.0,0.0,0.3318262024771355,0.0,0.16623416114516532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060512740631662815,0.12207457791495573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17120550491194275,0.0,0.0,0.0903597559888766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18739038382796008,0.0,0.08463596926888796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1963862366960304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237682151113633,0.0,0.0,0.0633719353128499,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605599116131049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08555926919071746,0.0,0.1984907586043062,0.21584703656994408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549129743474604,0.0,0.0,0.04799992211029718,0.09461171076105757,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570858647662781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09710583859893046,0.0653396990408927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14855725076786766,0.0,0.0,0.07935100996260178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058475899899468685,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,gui51,2020/04/18,"Need help getting my life back together Hey all, first time poster here. I usually don't go online for personal help but I am lost and need any help I could get. 

I feel like I need to give some background first before I can explain what I've been going through. I have to travel a lot throughout my life because of my parents job. For this reason I moved to NYC for 6 years and lived there from 12 to 18 years old graduating high school in the process. In my final year I lived with a friend because my parents had to move away. Since I'm an EU citizen we decided early on that I would attend college in the EU mainly because of outrageous international fees in the U.S. I've always wanted to stay in the U.S so more or less behind my parents back I applied to some U.S schools and got into some public and private schools which ranged in between 10k to 50k in pricing some were simply unaffordable but some worked. At the same time I got into a really good U.K school and ended up coming here for college much to my disappointment. I was extremely happy during the last few years in high school. I've been with a girl I love since I was 16 and I had an amazing group of friends. When I found out I was going to move to the UK I was really sad that I would have to give up seeing my friends and girlfriend so much but I understood that I am not American and it's what made the most sense. Despite my feelings I tried to be keep my hopes up that I would enjoy London and moving back in with my family. 

Which brings me to why I'm here reaching out for help. I hate my life right now. I found it really hard to adapt to college life. I have two days of classes per week and it's been really tough to make friends as I had no friends coming in and barely attend school. I quickly lost hope after I didn't make many friends and entered a vicious cycle where I sleep between 4 and 7 am. My american friends all know this and as much as they can give words of encouragement I feel stuck like everything is so hard. My grades are barely passing, I feel alone and have no aspirations. I'm doing a politics and international relations course that I have grown to really despise. I've always had an interest in these subjects but not anymore. I barely sleep or do work I mostly just sit at home playing video games and smoking. I gave up smoking during the summer between high school (2019) and college but quickly picked it back up again when I got here. My girlfriend moved to California and right now we are on a break because she's tired of waiting for me to get my life back together. I don't blame her she tried to help me over the course of many months but I feel as though everything is so hard.. I care about school and I rely on friends a lot but I've lost hope. I can't find a way out of this cycle of playing games all day and sleeping late and it's been hurting my american friendships and girlfriend, grades, family relationships. I don't know what I want to do in life and I just feel like I have no vision for my future and no way out. I don't know if moving to the U.S would magically resolve all these issues but I just feel alone. I've argued with my parents countless times about college and where I live and they constantly try to tell me that I just have to try harder. I'm a shy person but once i warm up I'm very open and relaxed but I can't find the motivation for anything. Now that quarantine hit it's basically the end of the school year and I feel like I just wasted an entire year. I didn't exactly learn much and i feel as though my maturity and individuality moved backwards. I once again rely on my family for things like food and money which at 19 years old isn't the end of the world but it's not like I'm improving while i rely on them. I'd like to end this post by just saying that for a while now I've felt as though I shouldn't be feeling this way. In theory, I have a family, a decent living (financially) and a girlfriend (even-though we're long distance and she's been having doubts about us) so i almost feel like there's so many people who've got it worse than me which means I shouldn't feel this way but i do and it makes me feel guilty.",3.229065774568109,4.606190594626174,4.356032285471538,86.93243981874825,73.5443925233645,7.33741149815916,24.88558482016425,7.898369717300924,1.2124352024922112,3303,102,698,46,66,1080,324,856,0.10400000000000001,0.733,0.163,0.9961,6,3,0,0,0,1,56.0,3,0,3,9,41,45,5,1,34,0,54,12,3,7,5,143,122,69,0,16,24,4,18,8,12,6,7,2,1,4,33,50,1,2,29,7,3,19,18,13,0,3,30,21,101,32,104,82,22,121,0,6,1,1,51,45,0,17,57,448,134,23,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04031185679555281,0.08338881470783342,0.0,0.0,0.06699457382423782,0.0,0.0,0.0273763349743798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039924410275839484,0.0,0.0,0.03312831625092971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03782304540408432,0.154776840074917,0.0,0.09816187161132632,0.0,0.03425598531332456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041044986104287896,0.0,0.0,0.06935617456407063,0.0,0.04350382452414535,0.0,0.03214216712134653,0.0,0.0,0.05192523816072328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14262402567072288,0.0,0.0,0.026589557740333856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723613057389722,0.0,0.151803945809698,0.0,0.26461881429792444,0.115039252704299,0.03865330776415159,0.0440998890737028,0.0735888601990798,0.06848565384538485,0.04867927005153122,0.08828007245738803,0.2488214345288353,0.0,0.06309831116085655,0.11585537110049075,0.06863743012310612,0.033765901519108764,0.12878971681125198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04285462954888672,0.10818786280978726,0.03974573545253053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13491805115830993,0.12760209887374596,0.040381340255968345,0.11995370557810207,0.0,0.0,0.043096257304805284,0.0,0.0,0.04201814743303058,0.03994914457315882,0.03578252552464012,0.0,0.0,0.06637305473190452,0.03281506117423435,0.045411972113884036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706094699895215,0.15734141180029632,0.0,0.1421916844113467,0.03562643130429295,0.0,0.0,0.13183674966892772,0.06845060991911454,0.03633377238192989,0.03809241741204938,0.08061615306277778,0.12244370817846438,0.0,0.04385198630297298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03213298162380595,0.29950986817842684,0.11837494914794433,0.08955080245558966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08448649934597492,0.08574539151004264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178803807983958,0.0,0.0,0.027909333260852598,0.07030221871253489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03855535186493745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289492413538832,0.04139119486950383,0.0,0.043221259316164176,0.0,0.06875900459705768,0.0,0.032014209651805736,0.0,0.3666827041704011,0.0320798448291031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660248600519325,0.0,0.1208590780498512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04290891049437962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035186642392699016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02674515201799903,0.0,0.1582103164667819,0.0,0.07042304165536335,0.04626982819333783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093282185981742,0.0,0.03932551882854965,0.0,0.04842455833249697,0.0,0.0443377130438852,0.03321647705009866,0.04748958064916279,0.12781743927923506,0.032291966562736266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.036325939012261686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058615567368230974,0.0,0.04102561372997336,0.11439048380099255,0.0,0.0,0.1814706061668624
mentalhealth,justalilpricc,2020/04/18,First time putting an animal to sleep Okay so my mom had way too much emotionally going on so I said I would take my Cat in. How exactly do you get over it / cope with the experience? The whole idea of holding a little cat while it goes (peacefully which is nice) is kind of scarring in the sense that I’ve never had anything die near or around me. I disassociated before and after was a mess during and now I just keep jumping between numb and losing my shit and don’t know how to properly handle the entire experience.,3.8475,5.420558834951457,5.355521844660196,79.59794296116505,72.3009708737864,8.256796116504855,25.496359223300967,8.841846274778883,1.8460495145631064,412,13,81,8,8,139,79,103,0.106,0.846,0.048,-0.7231,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,1,0,2,8,7,1,0,7,1,8,3,2,2,2,17,14,10,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,4,6,0,2,2,0,0,3,2,4,0,1,4,1,9,3,13,9,2,17,0,1,0,0,3,7,1,1,6,58,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16407834861634696,0.17749652561684567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696634823775081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2069320206368987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22428331473674426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.390077102004832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16959831133201891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1041713742943718,0.0,0.11331611405145592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22508342922685926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17722415026874375,0.0,0.2076306710900253,0.10957777158110857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19983795569833426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2230628294901149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23351941188988856,0.0,0.0,0.14657224069751562,0.0,0.1537793929717128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20043880631413347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18966250715776373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20466768627278545,0.0,0.0,0.19953079606691704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499140605866941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11626404726629146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1582639621830956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2226082431422569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416386629592525,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maiden_pip,2020/04/18,Is there a good mental health based discord server anyone recommends? I just don't have anyone to talk to.,3.823,6.5238273000000016,4.240000000000002,82.47500000000002,76.0,6.0,20.0,7.1686216300943375,0.7725,86,2,14,1,2,27,18,20,0.126,0.6509999999999999,0.223,0.2732,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5989928658458762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592606481659174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4552919294162632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4316532117226025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34427328848333194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,si110projectuser,2020/04/18,"Reddit vs other social media platforms on mental health . Hi guys.  I am writing this paper for one of my classes where I am effectively arguing that Reddit is easier on mental health than other social media platforms given there are no faces/profile pictures, no emphasis on looking skinny and having nice clothes and being an influencer in that way like Instagram/Twitter... instead it is more about the content one produces.  I’d love to hear everyone’s thoughts!  Let me know down below!",6.345996677740864,8.797221406976746,6.76421926910299,68.44872093023258,67.48837209302326,8.170099667774089,34.37873754152824,8.841846274778883,3.642427242524917,395,19,52,7,7,128,69,86,0.078,0.7559999999999999,0.166,0.855,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,4,4,1,0,2,0,8,4,1,3,0,9,14,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,6,2,1,0,3,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,2,2,4,3,11,10,1,10,0,0,1,1,8,9,0,0,1,41,10,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032369911582161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21059921411807075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4521647917588539,0.2397201327779274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11689034642418895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21749269779372885,0.0,0.10391091049577117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17860830134809574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19196346730354327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4286884347825629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2882521583172101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4336268485877898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885424709327648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16882556652791197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,7Blythe,2020/04/18,"I can't live in the moment Okay so i'm gonna try to keep this short. Whenever i'm doing something i can't live in the moment, i can't enjoy it. I'm always waiting for the next thing to happen. Whenever we're with friends, I'm thinking about the people who could join us so we would have more fun. Even when i'm reading a book i'm thinking about the parts which are gonna come.

I'm at the moment the happiest i've ever been, taking medications everyday (antidepressants) but still i have these feelings. Does anyone have any good advice to follow so i can stop having these feelings?

(Sorry for my english, it isnt my first language)",2.2107435897435934,4.218562869230773,3.884230769230772,86.50993589743591,78.0,6.17948717948718,23.14102564102564,7.1686216300943375,0.9103333333333342,503,16,100,6,12,168,81,130,0.042,0.843,0.11599999999999999,0.7792,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,2,0,0,1,9,5,0,0,8,1,14,1,0,0,1,14,33,5,0,2,1,0,2,0,1,3,1,0,0,0,8,3,0,3,4,2,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,2,9,5,11,28,2,16,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,10,61,17,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888322638502012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16079147717074774,0.0,0.0,0.131410085586937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13511816747010685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16645947757390672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15428672012958042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1691059596523838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12763344916863673,0.17479698785095127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19541628573250447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643701693766123,0.0,0.0,0.14929703902064892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16208086336972105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17088183074763855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171760929507557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3412695935327464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19466935395598692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20551333747646303,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092605015043188,0.0,0.133968548964472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932926746090133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14876588617812592,0.0,0.2163167857261058,0.0,0.0,0.15432201789937167,0.16155761126213095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14529271746303354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12838032260381174,0.2476412669028602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119753407914775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23244438530352302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372724223374618,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Purple_And_Cyan,2020/04/18,"I am planning on killing myself today I have heard it all. I have nothing to look forward to. Everything pisses me off

I just got banned from my favorite discord for some bitch ass mother fucker telling them something that would get me banned. All I want to do is kill everyone I see, but yet, I just want to make people feel happy.

​

It feels like everyone wants to have a piece of me. To be under their control. I must wonder, how delicious it must feel to have control over someone's life the same why mine is controlled.

Just pm me.. idk",2.4937298215802883,4.951676401869161,3.0914868309260832,90.22350042480885,79.37383177570094,5.386236193712829,25.61512319456245,6.574015621080383,0.998876635514018,433,17,83,4,11,135,76,107,0.182,0.67,0.14800000000000002,-0.0129,0,0,1,0,0,1,16.0,0,0,2,4,5,7,5,0,2,0,12,4,2,5,4,25,25,2,2,6,4,1,3,1,0,3,1,1,0,0,4,0,0,5,4,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,2,6,17,2,14,19,5,7,0,0,2,2,5,5,4,2,4,60,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16681996369665594,0.18708315035430184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5180512591280302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29423845997306713,0.13837294376447182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2335465211324567,0.10999193479579218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043985177556916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231391007927018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16389757437507516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34067677815060265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874934863533377,0.07521904871853077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12929100954401884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10277218650995047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14773264056140994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10673927349345567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12268939923563947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304532241732481,0.11852903337390315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13457134968318438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14593989922575354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27243592437107483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13892859076555175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16696742438768314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10937163046285772,0.0,0.18708315035430184,0.0
mentalhealth,RafaelTheVengeful,2020/04/18,"Am I real and how can I tell if I urgently need to to call a helpline? Dissociating something fierce, and really don't wanna take up any resources during this high stress time. Especially since there will be lots of younger people, and I've been mostly managing. Albeit unhealthily right now. How do I gather enough self worth to reach out to a professional? And when do you know you're bad enough to call a hotline?",5.006877637130803,6.736749202531648,5.5272784810126625,78.88602320675106,69.63291139240506,8.810970464135021,27.090717299578056,9.2995712137729,2.28064388185654,333,11,62,7,6,107,60,79,0.091,0.8690000000000001,0.04,-0.7041,0,0,1,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,1,3,0,8,0,0,2,0,14,11,8,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,9,8,4,7,0,0,0,0,6,4,0,3,3,40,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14999577551033938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18416748801638616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4504550998451559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4558174034646478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330452657404839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1212199980606031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1875214912548008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1635505273011644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15291608940188067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510579730005825,0.14130336640347754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18836634318484607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23010355313725955,0.0,0.0,0.18245852756796585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1698062547262282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526632204018528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16584186620481695,0.0,0.19278868841417807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12861666541289174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,goldengirl_knows,2020/04/18,Bipolar | Dual Personality | CBD OIL [Bipolar | Dual Personality | CBD Oil](https://youtu.be/Yuk83xgf_s0),14.015999999999998,17.113826600000003,13.073333333333338,28.05000000000004,49.66666666666666,14.0,55.0,13.023866798666859,8.947000000000003,89,6,8,3,1,29,8,15,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justanothermoroccan,2020/04/18,"I'm stressing about schoolwork cause I'm failing all my classes Since December, I started feeling depressed. I come from a very conservative family and they don't believe in therapy at all, so that sucks. I used to be a straight A student but I started sleeping in class, I stopped paying attention, I barely studied, and my grades are slipping. The past few weeks I didn't do shit for school and I have exams in a month and 2 weeks, and I don't study for anything. remember those are 10 exams and I already don't understand anything. 

I feel so useless and stupid. Because I'm a straight a student (or I used to be) people have really high expectations of me. I'm gonna let everyone down and I just wanna die. 


The worst part is I can't even bring myself up to study. I can't concentrate and I have ZERO motivation. Not even one bit. I just lay in my bed all day.",1.8102298850574703,4.1171709425287375,3.642068965517243,86.16816091954023,80.95402298850577,6.625287356321839,28.05747126436781,7.793537801064563,1.9239678160919536,680,32,135,12,18,228,103,174,0.185,0.743,0.07200000000000001,-0.9689,0,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,0,1,2,7,8,3,1,8,0,16,2,2,4,3,31,31,13,1,2,5,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,10,0,2,6,0,1,2,7,8,0,2,1,2,23,0,16,26,7,20,0,3,0,0,1,10,2,1,8,91,25,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17606099790385946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26258257388486805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09725666673572134,0.0,0.0,0.179751684929996,0.0,0.0,0.17418095063763084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16389584735183782,0.0,0.13743320588569596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10289281367752008,0.0,0.13741519027160526,0.0,0.1655816963549692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21075488585150287,0.0,0.0,0.1524513253131798,0.0,0.0,0.1504040777180717,0.0,0.16134068796755124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16856721251989032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16314475940445666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12734666255694987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10811128257068443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1727708269072159,0.152302996794258,0.11060786348958444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10220810329970652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18073248335913325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16146725345643348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637698340633299,0.13197661533646265,0.0,0.15965942625085597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2258524194095925,0.0,0.0,0.13338609957568526,0.1827573481662892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824527032145915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16609114438110958,0.0,0.2755899361499975,0.0,0.1316406782212751,0.0,0.0,0.2559534759213553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,i-just-want-a-cat-2,2020/04/18,"I wish I was older. I can’t do anything I want to cause my parents are stopping me. I want to start going to the gym but my dad just says that it’s not good for your mind, and something about how everybody who goes to the gym are weight and body obsessed. I can’t workout at home since we don’t have any tools to use and I lack the motivation to workout at home.

I haven’t exercised in a year.

I hate where I live. It’s always so cold and dark, and it’s making my mood so much worse. I want to leave my country so I can move to some place warmer, maybe the southern parts of America or southern Italy/Spain. I would do that if I was able to, but again, my parents are stopping me. 

Life is so fucking boring. I have nothing to look forward to, and nothing to live for. 3 years is too much time. 

Nothing ever feels real. I don’t know what the fuck I’m supposed to do. Help.",0.1959625668449192,2.1959560160427856,2.0019545454545487,97.36293181818183,85.09625668449199,4.595614973262032,21.114705882352947,5.6839178017228535,-0.13478160427807495,673,22,158,4,20,221,107,187,0.16399999999999998,0.7559999999999999,0.08,-0.9567,2,0,1,0,0,0,22.0,1,1,0,1,11,7,3,1,6,0,19,6,1,5,1,32,34,15,0,7,6,3,2,0,0,1,2,1,2,0,7,7,1,2,3,5,0,3,6,5,0,0,2,5,25,1,20,31,5,17,0,0,1,2,8,6,2,3,10,103,32,1,0.12930554452194434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10759257149345906,0.0,0.0,0.08793220435097981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640744559513964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1436293101155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13283241307556554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11696426790223086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06538076850719357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2390817846175041,0.0,0.0,0.07348732079926384,0.10845535588499992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12766245500585216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08667078084916092,0.0,0.2594080081703631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0710629456371295,0.0,0.0,0.1369159014020098,0.0,0.0,0.0913323301151078,0.0,0.0,0.2283583296005426,0.0,0.10858409096487402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08631245504240641,0.0,0.12990479931874432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1305617390999224,0.0,0.0,0.13743133026831691,0.19010890662053814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3722164720758793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2871570098242294,0.14002530398393884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13509677274318604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717801825230914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10282895894838336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10696288263518013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09954572547032826,0.0,0.0,0.09152312994461742,0.0,0.0,0.21621045027871186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753991028583896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167847395047104,0.0,0.0,0.2288032810505411,0.0,0.0,0.15745931811121625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869499477702494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177339674958102,0.09185494887107508,0.0,0.0,0.16653706244665292
mentalhealth,No_Bully_I_Beg,2020/04/18,"I puke when stressed out, is this normal? If it's relationship or friendship problems or just stress in general I feel extremely nauseous and have to run to the bathroom to throw up. As soon as I'm done puking all of my stress goes away and I can go back to doing what i was doing. Is this normal?",1.7212021857923503,3.8444657377049225,3.2700819672131125,89.72566939890713,80.14754098360656,6.033879781420765,23.281420765027317,7.1686216300943375,0.850768306010929,234,8,49,3,6,77,46,61,0.253,0.7040000000000001,0.043,-0.924,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,3,1,0,8,0,0,0,1,13,11,8,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,3,0,4,0,0,2,1,5,0,11,9,1,10,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,3,3,39,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20591940838354186,0.16852982090257246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22428915946808456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1108200022280572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12456055871861366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4294842586632857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20971810569623173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2353088190781988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7531827210897465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hipsnowsis,2020/04/18,"Something is happening during panic attacks (etc) and idk what it's called - any help? Hey y'all!

Recently, when I have a panic/anxiety/dysphoria/etc attack, this thing will happen where I'll kinda freeze in place, space out completely, and feel like I'm not experiencing what's going on (but from within my own body - I just don't feel the bad feelings that I would normally feel in this situation, I simply notice them happening).

This has come alongside these attacks happening more often and usually more severely than before (probably due to self-isolation).

I plan to discuss this with a mental health professional soon, but, to get me started on the right foot, would anyone simply be able to tell me if there's an official/medical word for what I'm describing here?

I'm not asking for a diagnosis or anything, just a vague idea I can take to my therapist so that we can discuss it in more detail and talk about strategies or solutions.

Thanks in advance! :)",8.780686641697876,8.072454696629213,8.895243445692882,66.51448813982522,61.02247191011237,12.630212234706619,37.75530586766542,11.855464076750405,4.67656354556804,768,32,129,21,9,253,123,178,0.08199999999999999,0.8220000000000001,0.096,0.7512,0,1,1,0,0,0,31.0,1,1,1,2,10,7,3,1,7,0,10,3,2,0,0,28,28,11,0,4,9,0,5,1,0,3,1,0,0,0,13,8,0,0,5,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,0,6,13,2,19,24,5,21,0,0,0,0,11,12,0,5,7,87,26,1,0.11703989701332768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07959114343814533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08183701730487003,0.0,0.09631386279644696,0.0,0.10941650448272357,0.399449337842379,0.0,0.0,0.09772342524636438,0.0,0.0,0.09959233196260167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300049408257242,0.0,0.0,0.11951082069557535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1008195078562566,0.1227141052412489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2610608465388237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2367155543414617,0.08361332581199847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061148515545858276,0.0,0.06651647065815923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4139919775947599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12440793749284325,0.0,0.0,0.07844937587288818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1321237975828194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0571797817671601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300049408257242,0.0,0.1179486881118704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146742491499787,0.0,0.13325069848488785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27464220298115805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1222817817066772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261888044503561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155627785022781,0.0,0.0,0.0999514325542492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12209813803797495,0.13222176954286868,0.0,0.0,0.13155774802243406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09010303077287576,0.0,0.0,0.08284144150707727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08799943675912014,0.0940722358268098,0.1022980287319296,0.10775461236379184,0.0,0.13589234128174765,0.07775610696361256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890291128807824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16628356959914606,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rosiegirl8903,2020/04/18,Alternatives to talk therapy Who else feels like therapy just triggers a lot of bad memories and they don’t wanna do it? Because I know that in therapy I talk about the worst things that I could think of that have happened to me for an hour and while I’m still in my thought process my therapist will say “ OK your session is done time to go home “ but I’m still fully upset about what we’ve been talking about like how are you just gonna make me upset by making me talk about a subject that is very hard and then send me home for the week? My family always noticed that therapy days and the day after were the worst days because it put a focus on my issues and traumas. I know the whole point is to talk about it but what do you do when you spent three years talking about it and you still don’t feel relieved? It’s not like I feel distressed with a lot of things but it’s almost like something that my therapist will say is traumatic it’s like nothing to me so I guess maybe they’re concerned that I’m not having the emotional reaction I’m supposed to be having to these events but either way why would I make myself upset about something I’m not upset about? I  don’t think I liked talk therapy that much so what are some alternatives? I know they say that talking about things help but I don’t want to talk about it I want to move on I spent three years in therapy talking about it all they ever did was trigger me not help me,2.91718926553672,4.5142313220339005,3.763749999999998,89.97116172316385,74.76271186440678,6.950564971751412,24.495056497175145,7.645422480735847,1.0532514124293786,1140,36,243,15,24,364,133,295,0.126,0.757,0.11699999999999999,-0.7911,0,0,2,0,0,0,6.0,0,5,3,0,21,17,0,5,11,1,26,0,0,6,2,46,51,17,0,5,12,0,4,6,0,4,0,3,2,0,26,7,0,0,9,0,2,4,8,9,0,2,8,7,34,8,34,37,9,28,0,0,0,0,25,6,0,5,23,169,60,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07137338925933825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0593079825133273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05951312572769521,0.08689931486501626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0569087010113524,0.0,0.0,0.1379028602338407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294088248868051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05954259531001041,0.08017677267300319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0644739191483248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06719339529762343,0.0,0.10811902963677014,0.05092013873864226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0405082309718657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07851939798278157,0.0,0.06302981232683189,0.0,0.06384998574671367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09555063297898693,0.0,0.14299282375010686,0.0,0.07019326085027347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07439442960674543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11751554625075465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2089333769960816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12119392196628005,0.0,0.0,0.14273339236943294,0.0,0.07160709572650895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07575592644732132,0.052396627169395686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06839198317203114,0.08114907507838674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06737958634980838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165284063845506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1700464450618264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10974467964695173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17076516181161885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5728956781991849,0.0,0.0,0.4890671900477988,0.16551564728196816,0.1420593565408336,0.09134255238824952,0.0,0.056585793697388476,0.04156205778684072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058810799967470365,0.08408177134151162,0.0565761823752999,0.05717392555547018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06431619854382797,0.07957796827866002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05063297238638339,0.0,0.0,0.09179980597459224
mentalhealth,scarlet_witcher,2020/04/18,"PSA: In this time where mental health is very important, be kind to your therapists/mental health services. They are people and are also affected by this stressful time. As someone who has a healthcare worker in the family who is doing telemedicine for mental health, their phone is ringing off the hook, and they feel obligated to take calls at all hours of the day/night and weekends. This is really hurting their own mental health, and although they could simply not pick up the calls, they deem this unethical/denying someone in need. 

Blessings to everyone and be safe",8.531419141914192,9.337487900990102,7.2146039603960395,73.31946369636964,61.07920792079207,9.901650165016502,34.65511551155116,9.725611199111238,3.4202264026402633,462,18,73,8,6,139,68,101,0.07200000000000001,0.818,0.11,0.6444,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,1,6,1,2,5,0,1,5,0,11,4,0,2,1,13,14,8,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,6,5,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,2,7,3,13,11,2,11,1,1,0,0,12,7,0,0,4,53,13,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11609256866065527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29647004147974304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11590660424302647,0.0,0.0,0.09362277918284494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387163617729527,0.0,0.0,0.1368535590884996,0.0,0.07340242269074278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6172366012423851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1429634196759683,0.0,0.1554077178718385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15117243975414182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4388922976198187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10764187513844946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13623241288128313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10064274859687368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09299975716395883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2460045045167893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16629199105236478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10914993518715027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.169299839842212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978063100905405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Guigzi,2020/04/18,"Cognitive troubles and recognition Hello. After years of taking psychiatic medication and struggling really hard in life, i realised that i am 100% part of people suffering from chronic brain impairment. I'm off medication now, i'm now able to watch TV and eat at the same time in years just to show you how much it disabled me. So i wanted to know if there was a way to get tested by professonal in order to evaluate the damaged done to my brain and if i can have allowances ? Thank you. And also i accept any advice on how yo cope. Cognitive troubles have altered my life and functioning for years, what do i do now ?",4.723945386064031,6.408698720338986,6.023333333333337,75.23061205273072,70.27118644067797,9.312241054613937,30.060263653484,9.725611199111238,3.072347269303201,491,20,87,12,9,165,81,118,0.13699999999999998,0.821,0.040999999999999995,-0.8946,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,0,0,9,7,0,1,3,0,8,8,2,3,0,16,15,12,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,3,6,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,5,0,0,2,2,11,2,18,13,3,16,0,2,1,0,3,6,0,2,8,63,14,1,0.18990517794713727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18557314201000816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15186710219347468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291420331300869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4239939680043013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19433893070941816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19432040691957006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09921761743020988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17011773826226428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10436691935028787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2682712866947901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3826189754874606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13960215656097427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2056488015922556,0.0,0.13165633909669516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216581197929327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19853012482506974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14278505982524553,0.0,0.0,0.1748391732884086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11073523643796246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11201099422672177,0.1507378908960018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3668781249363736
mentalhealth,katie9x,2020/04/18,"Anyone wanna make friends? So I’ve got to the point of lockdown where I’m struggling, don’t talk to loads of people and needing some motivation back in my life. Does anyone know any good online games or platforms to find new friends, just wanna laugh and enjoy myself a bit more!",7.107777777777778,6.9459512592592585,6.507777777777778,80.465,64.18518518518519,7.9407407407407415,30.962962962962962,6.42735559955562,1.691451851851852,224,7,41,1,3,69,46,54,0.043,0.6679999999999999,0.289,0.9412,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,4,6,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,12,6,4,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,2,5,8,5,3,6,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,2,22,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342668818435428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3566407584808541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960995495339522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27842276302281604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22317530959484666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330894972524893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39406550749032143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21390403352013165,0.20396789854886604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1401558326148667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18013267895343982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17023209343550044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18909883431144095,0.0,0.2463060734461691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17680318572200568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2410823672457393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2666089515452802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20498054940271326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LukeStarman,2020/04/18,feel like i can’t do this My anxiety and depression are so bad.  I guess it’s stress but i’m always dizzy and that triggers my hypochondria and it’s like I can’t do anything anymore !!  My mom doesn’t want anything to do with me because of all this(which is fine because she’s always been abusive towards me anyways lol) and my dad doesn’t know how to help me.  It’s so bad today and idk what to do because i’m home alone and I can’t afford to go to the doctor again....... I used to get episodes like this in the past but I could always just shrug them off but the past 6 months it’s like I can’t anymore ???  Like there’s no off switch.  Any advice ?  I’m very depressed and dizzy rn and I need help lol,-1.0297049969897645,1.071505827814569,0.762314870559905,101.82205147501509,96.68211920529802,3.2752558699578564,18.121914509331727,4.851557810540192,-0.8044860927152317,544,17,129,2,22,175,80,151,0.214,0.618,0.16899999999999998,-0.8325,1,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,1,0,7,11,0,1,3,2,14,1,0,3,1,23,25,14,0,3,4,2,1,5,0,0,1,0,1,0,8,9,0,0,2,0,0,1,7,5,0,0,1,1,17,6,12,23,1,10,0,2,0,0,6,4,0,1,10,74,25,1,0.0,0.16760222699159974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13822916443979036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14650575339611469,0.0,0.0,0.3531081672989498,0.0,0.0,0.09619492961252388,0.0,0.10821345155751318,0.0,0.28057268000994784,0.0,0.0,0.2328124676237317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2362197000065568,0.2586907909455947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294110430506794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24367168820688176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14478620831758535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07152440304417462,0.10105619348721907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07390492075811833,0.0,0.08039270371844577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558297300754666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1896299478623185,0.0,0.14189189996460636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07774051730054364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3455412778826397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1656715556275141,0.1129088283159628,0.0,0.0,0.10488783039587804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2700715130144732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203736818277573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13408374642235316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12217256487759068,0.0,0.11671601311134393,0.08343441282680286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ShullaFalulla,2020/04/18,"I feel like I can't do anything Does it ever happen to you, when approaching a task (it might be technical, it might be talking to someone or just doing  hores around the house) that you just feel **OVERWHELMED**?

It's just like, feeling there's no chance I'd succeed doing whatever it is, and there's no point and I should just quit before i start.

You know.. like feeling completely unable.. like I can't do anything. And this feeling accumulates. I just avoid doing mostly anything and have a general feeling of incompetence.",2.6948639455782306,5.595629744897959,3.6092857142857135,83.73154761904766,83.18367346938777,6.1238095238095225,26.534013605442176,7.492282038375204,1.8524054421768696,417,18,72,7,12,133,57,98,0.098,0.6920000000000001,0.21,0.8074,0,1,0,0,0,1,19.0,0,3,0,2,10,7,0,2,3,0,14,0,0,0,1,25,23,6,0,1,6,0,6,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,5,0,1,7,0,0,1,4,2,0,0,0,6,9,5,4,18,1,6,0,1,0,0,4,2,0,4,7,54,16,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41949002262248175,0.15126517742756854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445897415491563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17815830206617678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14869848338842093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1537027260761847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5155011457470912,0.12139116467081106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15026004478519572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960653227388877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933838056983401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3320580893981052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3605173751726147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16062969710319394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807312567880824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14397299990088727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12027053068268112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13657557762838013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,expired_soda,2020/04/18,"I feel bad for no reason and I can't handle my stress I have been feeling extremely bad for like 4 months (November-february) because I had obsessive thoughts about death and I couldn't stop thinking about it, and it was terrible, I felt like I had lost control over my life.

Now I feel pretty chill about all of that, but these last weeks I feel bad for no reason. Is like a feeling deep inside me, I try to feel fine but I am always worrying about something. And I feel like I cant handle stress or anxiety situations and my answer to them is very disproportionate. I think I'm having some anger issues again. It maybe is because of what has happened to me these last months, and I don't feel calm anymore.",3.1513829787234044,5.033729333333337,4.1400177304964565,86.30875,74.81560283687944,7.253191489361702,25.22517730496454,8.07648339933343,1.4517985815602843,560,19,113,9,12,181,82,141,0.222,0.617,0.161,-0.8868,0,0,1,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,2,6,15,1,3,1,0,15,1,0,3,1,29,30,9,1,1,3,0,9,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,7,6,0,2,15,0,0,0,6,9,0,0,7,9,21,6,13,22,2,10,0,1,0,0,1,2,0,2,12,72,28,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10668822851198737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09808695337877432,0.0,0.1271584954891996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211717725690061,0.1563218570075394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14380817299020926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5186498118940394,0.09159946380556096,0.12311005790722768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11338337160738228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1338270089379598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20903070474790872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09056465860605686,0.25056471798131763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13996585566125885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12881291637652334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20468588368043705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13044451179714253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26366035364041285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14412318923203024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09870901828027777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10719657317334973,0.2937481717809549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643147294696101,0.0,0.1017913244167858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08705207976403763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10579385438532343,0.0,0.0,0.10284930587916477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302123121790037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thealmightytruther,2020/04/18,"Weird feeling So I’ve been dealing with this feeling for years now, (Like about 5-6 years i believe), and I don’t know how to describe it properly to make myself and others understand. The symptoms I’ve been feeling are:
• feeling useless
• numb feeling
• head feels light
• feeling as though I’m not real
• not caring if anything bad happens to me
• constant sadness for no reason

I’ve been searching up a few disorders but theres only a few that can semi describe how I feel. I have so many things that I can do and look forward to yet I always find myself feeling down. I haven’t seen a doctor yet since I can’t describe or give a name to how I feel. 

Has anyone ever felt like this? Do you have any solutions or a name for how I’m feeling?",2.5198307692307718,4.331189926666667,3.935333333333337,87.39946153846157,76.4,5.682051282051282,28.205128205128197,6.297961479604792,1.2684974358974364,579,25,113,4,13,191,89,150,0.078,0.79,0.132,0.5442,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,0,13,8,0,0,6,0,14,4,1,6,1,35,36,15,0,1,6,0,12,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,7,4,0,0,16,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,5,15,13,3,13,31,2,10,0,2,2,0,5,3,0,3,10,77,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10882206008753463,0.0,0.0,0.08893702876218948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09144662141349214,0.0,0.10762339144407672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919846991053744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14734782787555073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13334214068891884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14133012678980095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1348316880388175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14988882381987134,0.13386209881724342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11830084933442507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7274068090695931,0.0,0.1255723363843736,0.0,0.1195334324742016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254591174148688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565111024970733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422124588350814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07187500059510189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12778808485378226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098249099125603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08729877015253228,0.13259358987982925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09946648114511024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488598601511326,0.0,0.13446686315226344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10818517560916477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13593377190642106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688651554344144,0.0,0.12849378376661294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361498745530648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16844012523181426
mentalhealth,IrishStark12,2020/04/18,"I need help with my mental health Hey everyone, I hope you are all doing well during these trying times.
Well first let me tell you about myself 
My name is Reece, I am 19 and I’m from Ireland
I’m a college student.
Now on to the problems I have been having 
Well for starters my mental state isn’t the best, I live in a nice household but my parents are sorta mentally and verbally abusive, and the environment I live in isn’t really helping me at all.Most days I feel down for reason at all and it’s really annoying me and getting to me.My online friends are really concerned about me and told me not to talk to them until I receive the help I need and come back as a changed man, and that’s hurting me.
I would also like to mention that I was verbally bullied in high school for 6 years and it was really bad at one point out I was having suicidal thoughts, but lucky enough got rid of them.
Recently with online friends I have been get angry and pissed off because my sense of humour is well not the best , I am very sensitive and defensive person and sometimes lash out at people when I shouldn’t, but I am a very supportive and caring person and I like to help and talk to people when they are in need.
Thanks for reading, and any help and advice will be really helpful 
You can either comment or pm me, thanks !!",5.279830827067666,5.386296409774438,6.020817669172933,81.50724154135341,67.98496240601504,9.056015037593985,29.782894736842106,8.841846274778883,2.218196240601504,1039,35,208,16,16,341,142,266,0.131,0.623,0.24600000000000002,0.9839,1,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,3,3,3,11,24,3,0,9,0,27,2,1,1,2,45,44,26,1,7,7,1,1,2,2,3,1,0,0,3,5,22,0,1,3,1,0,2,5,6,4,2,8,1,36,18,33,31,6,29,0,1,0,0,27,15,1,4,13,150,41,4,0.0,0.11215961741973028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09250312766185928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07570159016374246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06437376577101996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07278964155783267,0.0790392575782026,0.0577053989939317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1986849677412413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09651475714426072,0.0,0.1001404037768242,0.08154338665748667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061049499907329226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09781169724665048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904541030411397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04786421890450947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08051989872720049,0.0,0.0,0.14627207002104645,0.0,0.09891452860088172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07571027195096032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10062184160532776,0.0,0.0,0.3807017863424996,0.10001615912035404,0.0,0.0940212505128628,0.0,0.0,0.10133819504851352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09679884938669588,0.0,0.09249466006674008,0.0,0.1671774946399703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28619269281186105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21057319715286707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06414577947072155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10511153579266233,0.0,0.0,0.1312541568358833,0.1653113378696983,0.0,0.0,0.08948668744745318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057925570716233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09468814592851546,0.0,0.30321619994181315,0.09732884573503603,0.09346782711992738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09580353304186974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936236616004588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1035454422706026,0.10742191599831688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15217230996002687,0.08273922268178131,0.17430507660552902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515147404253351,0.055198481859700235,0.0,0.0,0.0904541030411397,0.0,0.06426964331408988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15621300041533062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.340451927988858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724554453262394,0.0,0.0,0.06095956498112685
mentalhealth,attackonkataang,2020/04/18,"Quarantine has me (accidentally) off my antidepressants and I feel wrong I don’t know if this is the right place but I felt a strong inner persuasion to reach out. I’m 26, F, was taking sertraline for about a year and a half and not leaving my apartment for a few weeks has thrown off everything. My sleep schedule is backwards and mainly non existent. My hygiene routine is also basically non existent with maybe 1 shower a week. I’ve just mainly forgotten due to sleeping through the day to take my medication and I’m starting to feel...weird. I’ve had a long, long battle with mental health and feel I didn’t start to become a self aware and functioning human until I was 24? 25? I don’t have much consciousness of my life before and have struggled with, mainly mentally, abusive parent(s) growing up, jumped into a three year hell hole of an abusive relationship, jumped in to an even worse one with r*pe, and then finally started to fix my life and start down a path of self discovery and spirituality. I felt like I was finally meeting myself for the first time. Life was going good for once. Recently with the pandemic, I haven’t been working. The past three weeks was voluntary off of work because I’ve been stressed and was going to take a week of vacation at this time anyways just because I needed a break and my job couldn’t afford to give hours to people. Losing my routine has messed so many things up. In the past few hours I’ve gone on a journey back into my past, dug up some memories, and I guess started not identifying with myself anymore, feel like a stranger. And I’m confused and a little scared. I feel like I’m in a dangerous place, on the edge of a spiral. I have no actual friends or valid connections to reach out to. Over the past year I have prided myself on my independence and how strong I have been and happy I have been going being alone and not needing anyone, but I think right now that’s all back firing on me. I feel so lost and confused. I need back on track.",5.54113110539846,6.255447503856042,6.161176349614397,78.60406786632394,67.53470437017995,9.308832904884321,30.470025706940874,9.3871,2.614087012853471,1585,58,302,30,25,517,193,389,0.16699999999999998,0.746,0.087,-0.988,4,2,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,0,0,8,13,21,3,5,26,0,29,7,2,2,1,60,60,30,0,5,9,0,8,3,1,0,5,0,1,3,4,30,0,0,10,0,0,8,9,12,0,5,16,8,35,9,52,42,8,73,1,2,0,0,7,29,1,6,38,200,39,3,0.0,0.1881617472125164,0.07748694689439374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223870001763355,0.0,0.0634994296506485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07874753014680415,0.055521192580051136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1831705534877108,0.0,0.09680800405782702,0.08769558939085842,0.06756704025261362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05120907521476927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05244565881576077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.071363284589205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24089459108079714,0.11345260904053672,0.15248077541539712,0.17396661943451136,0.0,0.06754108643749578,0.0,0.0,0.061347410272794924,0.0,0.0,0.07617164758244922,0.13538153877477185,0.06660039132548283,0.0,0.0,0.08747256765306642,0.0,0.0,0.08452714038892896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08440284462342043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15639408646157255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879631646100034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04363841646688947,0.0,0.0,0.0840774762817983,0.0,0.0,0.16825639112145446,0.11637849642123517,0.0795837678648246,0.0,0.1405402586424987,0.0,0.08883287651425986,0.08667895444818617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050329388672371,0.07977209054443088,0.0,0.0,0.07999127647150546,0.16004131242534525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058371149456246725,0.1766314008728028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456277445596698,0.05380627278867887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816885560925203,0.0,0.3032007907847077,0.055048804657390316,0.0,0.16592076727029442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0784019688353055,0.08525028666590401,0.0,0.13562133416527197,0.0,0.0,0.07949735571710644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16567158625583636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15892288830300064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2810131514439841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095712765355143,0.08301040523446329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910600249656425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052752555398238865,0.050878940737275065,0.0,0.0,0.0926023378925374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25477271602306184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561426021100428,0.0,0.08091956103224594,0.0,0.08681591769569197,0.0,0.15340091006069173
mentalhealth,ch0ke-me_dAdDySaTaN,2020/04/18,"im a pathological liar ive been aware of my skills to lie ever since i was a kid. i dont mean to brag but i am also aware that i am quite intelligent, understanding complicated and complex situations that also started in a very young age. i also can analyze and deeply comprehend people's behavior and mindset thus, putting me into the advantage of knowing their weaknesses and soft spots in order to help me pull off a great lie. this has been going on for years and i just realized recently how serious this actually is and that ive gone too far. i get stupid and dumb when it comes to assessing myself. what do i about this? i want to get better.",3.896511627906978,5.470592643410853,5.814643410852714,76.35080232558141,72.17829457364341,9.811162790697674,28.403875968992253,10.125756701596842,3.0078489922480616,517,20,100,15,10,179,89,129,0.11599999999999999,0.728,0.157,0.7685,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,1,4,9,8,3,0,5,0,12,2,0,2,1,20,22,13,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,8,9,0,0,5,0,0,5,1,5,0,0,4,1,16,3,14,18,0,19,0,0,0,0,3,6,1,0,7,69,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.19622465525147956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4824097809213949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17783854002077226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17321224564301374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356637596883059,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18188798402214806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21011155322313066,0.0,0.11427815409865046,0.0,0.0,0.22169093693725145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347793978880503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21720044214339126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1105080735547139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21903460135125494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13940325627520606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20214050743846335,0.0,0.21387287516735146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19854181797499806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1663350990575428,0.2260218627449829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14232515532810894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20933092489741809,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659117048585828,0.11860194078737135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12948865109262375
mentalhealth,shannonpaigee,2020/04/18,"Please read... Believe it or not, I know who you are.I know what you’re thinking as you pass a group of guys on your way to class. I know how you feel when you take three hours to pick the perfect outfit for a night out with friends. I know what runs through your head on those sleepless nights when you feel alone and worthless. Girls get the feeling. We all know the feeling. I understand that you don’t think you’re pretty enough, skinny enough or good enough. I understand when your face isn’t clear and your skin isn’t perfect. I understand when your hair just isn’t working out and your makeup isn’t its best.And yes, we glance over at the group of girls that started laughing the minute we walked by them.Oh, and we feel like crying too when they continue to stare at us.The world thinks it's because we are shy or quiet. It’s not that at all. We aren’t the ones with the problem. The world has the problem.It is not okay to say everyone is different, and then have size zero models walk down a runway. It is not okay for stores to only carry up to a size large. It is not okay for the idea of what “a perfect woman” is to be put into the minds of girls because in reality, there is no such thing.So know this. You are beautiful. You are kind. You are caring. You are strong. You make people smile and you have people that love you. You are amazing. You are you.Your skin, your face and your hair do not define you. Your body shape does not define you. Those girls laughing and staring do not define you.

You define you. I love you. </3",1.4175757575757582,3.6728267834394894,2.025367689635207,97.48922312294926,82.12101910828025,4.8251688863153825,18.750820304960435,5.941861826196648,-0.3737481953290871,1206,29,267,8,33,370,147,314,0.057999999999999996,0.742,0.2,0.9941,2,1,0,0,0,0,44.0,6,30,1,5,10,19,0,0,16,4,25,11,9,3,6,60,49,19,0,1,12,0,9,1,1,0,0,2,0,6,17,19,1,0,18,1,1,5,15,2,0,3,0,14,44,17,31,48,5,32,0,1,3,2,50,15,0,3,12,172,61,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364580190946034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13377914838205182,0.0,0.0,0.12362662703379255,0.115153461565762,0.0,0.0,0.12188380747332785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1118756844434742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12053178328736396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114643097749736,0.0,0.0,0.09602429199591236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3401371220265547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1048504393304564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774105436690051,0.07839017840972495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477609244827003,0.0,0.057328697268992174,0.0,0.0,0.09203519605788342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10864862738367648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11261326443757327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10806062939961304,0.0,0.0,0.12387030373573947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11426551648479938,0.36182401952185145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053607881885181584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1980688039856423,0.0,0.07324473427101445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11079466899229004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20594583305220165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07435498150526995,0.08345359238872557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.152144076890927,0.0,0.0,0.12044912051824493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11163349792148766,0.0,0.20999102165221264,0.0,0.11030761306527133,0.0,0.0,0.10975835662729183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08726063660034909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07766651208277497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08250229829409361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07289884761943735,0.2109290888286801,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3426942223325898,0.13199007044504954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08709750483800728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07988377315686733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Pat_35,2020/04/18,"I do nothing all day but I am stressed due to body dymorphia. I am becoming more and more obsessed with how I look. I spend nearly all day with that topic.

I am stressed right now. 

I am rather below average looking. I have some pretty ugly features. (Please no pity telling me how I am fine etc.) But due to that, I am so afraid to go outside, as I fear people judging me.

I also feel like everyone who looks like me is depressed. I feel like I am destined to be sad.

HOW DO I RELAX?",0.11656666666666735,2.34537259,2.291999999999998,93.47266666666668,88.1,4.933333333333334,23.333333333333336,6.42735559955562,0.6218333333333335,369,15,80,4,12,124,61,100,0.26,0.568,0.172,-0.8965,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,0,7,13,0,5,0,0,12,1,1,3,2,14,18,9,0,1,3,0,2,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,2,1,1,1,1,8,0,0,0,5,18,5,9,17,6,9,0,3,3,0,2,3,0,1,8,59,21,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14319962486663704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1977651700545835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19890280485664105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2309664953170951,0.0,0.15422993971103055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1997067737772723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17110596481688198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20149989075952165,0.18108307043048524,0.2558506610866885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10176776743283927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2624489246872148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4511129428600802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17181938758461066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12414234615435743,0.0,0.0,0.1965615319232395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18217527260461494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15292203633345106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4102407417072718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565122426643949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Soul_Mining,2020/04/18,"A dating site for mentally ill people: join me there! (This is not self promotion, I'm sharing a suggestion)

Just registered to No longer lonely, because I'm feeling bored and wait for it...: alone. I love the concept of this community, we can find people who understand us in our daily struggles and vice versa. 

The problem is that there are only a few people online and I noticed that only a small number of subscribers were recently active, so join me there guys!",4.867275747508304,6.951221674418608,5.803754152823924,75.33476744186048,70.62790697674419,8.170099667774089,29.727574750830563,8.841846274778883,2.7730086378737537,368,15,59,7,7,121,64,86,0.171,0.6509999999999999,0.17800000000000002,0.1739,0,3,0,0,0,0,15.0,3,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,6,0,5,2,0,0,0,11,11,4,0,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,6,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,1,1,7,2,6,10,1,5,0,1,0,1,9,3,0,0,2,41,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2322647759212073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13670625487178958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11339213007585472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20496873812538688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22205174911362624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20240257713768275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2260004083274563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25532045120281976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34111827467994765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4664190317601396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21458565459537854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22142878862882232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23395113158386516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2344442843427382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2334616132527973,0.26975606331826857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JayBarrod_mental666,2020/04/18,"16M- how do i tell my parents i have mental health issues with them understanding I have 3 mental health issues
1.anxiety 
2.panic disorder
3.antisocial personality disorder e.g. psychopathy 
only one of these is proven by a online therapist, but the others came pretty obvious to me from school life and growing up
i think becuase of my anxiety im scared to tell my parents, afraid of what they will say, i have tried once but they laughed and thought i was just over reacting 
does anyone know how i can tell them with them understanding",4.246925960637302,7.394192474226807,5.00166822867854,74.90928772258674,77.8659793814433,8.88809746954077,28.40581068416121,9.339509955726095,3.339709278350516,438,19,71,13,11,141,68,97,0.096,0.8,0.10400000000000001,0.4118,2,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,5,0,3,3,0,2,2,0,8,3,0,3,1,17,14,6,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,3,5,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,2,0,1,3,1,16,1,11,10,0,4,0,0,0,0,12,2,0,0,0,48,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2120457421096041,0.0,0.0,0.09690708737571076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15851288044496795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31767798792425833,0.0,0.1212832168658039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29463465961713353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14970366550608533,0.28930909205606026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07616680479975775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09789197024433184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793372535102717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14759647248429775,0.09391385408330198,0.10540582943681656,0.0,0.16260841876851342,0.3077811047384509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12101361142627055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14099838131039186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11021430611640193,0.13875525432037644,0.1402629930916287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3634078196578458,0.0,0.0,0.1609165561499094,0.0,0.08880446774448919,0.0,0.11002695150967756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09409519930988232,0.0,0.0,0.28855932751954616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,divdabis,2020/04/18,I want to do nothing or everything - there is no between How to deal with random energy busts and wanting only to be on my phone?,9.866538461538461,5.902183346153848,10.434615384615388,66.56038461538463,61.69230769230769,13.476923076923079,41.384615384615394,11.20814326018867,4.566430769230768,101,4,19,2,1,35,24,26,0.08,0.797,0.12300000000000001,0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,7,5,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,6,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,2,0,16,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4724736731205139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4118787174162927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4397386429714652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3485478405155976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5406189777440736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,raditiator,2020/04/18,"Confronting Myself about my looks. Holy shit this is fucking difficult. Hey everyone, so I’m about 17 years old and I’m insecure af about my looks. Even though I look fucking good. I got green eyes, good hair, great skin there’s honestly no problem I’m pretty fit too but whenever I see my pictures it just makes me hate myself. It is definitely not normal because I can’t take even take selfies I only focus on the bad things about it and it just fucking aches you know I’m tired of it and this point I don’t wanna shave everytime I wanna take a photo and I defo don’t wanna wash my hair like 4 times a day. Its getting out of control and I can’t really talk about it to anyone because these beliefs I hold are not true but they drive me insane so if anyone else is going through this please leave a comment because it is fucking lonely and I need to talk about it to someone and feel good because I don’t know what’s that like. Thank you for reading it means a lot :)",0.5025538461538446,2.931477440000002,2.2190000000000007,92.85430769230771,89.6,4.676923076923077,20.69230769230769,6.297961479604792,0.28795384615384645,768,26,158,8,26,251,115,200,0.175,0.6559999999999999,0.16899999999999998,-0.0909,0,2,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,2,1,1,15,21,7,1,5,0,10,11,5,2,1,31,36,13,0,7,7,0,4,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,17,8,0,2,5,1,0,2,8,12,0,0,1,10,23,9,18,35,1,10,1,1,6,4,7,4,5,2,6,96,40,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16321872860860054,0.1195876105946804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09745157967188052,0.2845918577608518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090503111955645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527107903640369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09749983553667957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1541774114561181,0.0,0.0,0.11152553173263967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059014265631101924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4316020220356664,0.06097841351253831,0.0,0.06633143612694913,0.293683295292355,0.0933471014920499,0.1286779467113431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11523122476000006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12828627274078913,0.0,0.0,0.12358360965994085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11404143979716776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29403189349821257,0.0,0.0,0.09922633870958332,0.0,0.0,0.07790771300867592,0.0,0.0,0.12713610736642192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08654218729556325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11435525002504945,0.0,0.0,0.12247204240249875,0.0,0.0,0.08876649755198578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12811727159472258,0.11033275512146412,0.0,0.0,0.11874042011049575,0.0,0.11167983891337177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11674590171606232,0.0,0.0747701802163269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09300619972633943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11980556933931764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09889166218101096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632639236946226,0.1876210941537653,0.0,0.10745486218181168,0.0,0.0,0.07753980617888401,0.0,0.1146712240229396,0.0,0.06805705693016145,0.1341459382106776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516019362458888
mentalhealth,dairukia,2020/04/18,"I need a little help please Hey there, first of all, sorry if my english isn't that good, it's not my first language.
So, I have a problem I think. Ever since I graduated from I guess the equivalent to highschool last year I did close to nothing. I did try out going to university and dokng an internship at a kindergarten and I've been kind of trying to find something.
I say kind of because I don't do it as actively as i would like to, because I don't have the motivation.
Now I am not someone who likes to talk about my problems and I get really anxious and cannot really talk when I get confronted with my problems, basically I freeze up like a scared animal.
That has led to a rather bad situation in where my parents think I don't trust them and stuff on multiple occasions and the other day, when I tried to talk to my mother, and asked why she didn't involve herself with my problems as much as she used to, she said she can't handle it and doesn't want me to see her crying again. Basically she said she can't handle my Problems either, deal with it yourself. Noe this wouldnt be too bad if there wasnt quarantine and everything, because I was supposed to already get therapy right now.
But now I am stuck at home with a father that doesnt understand why I dont do anything and shouts because of that and a mother who cant handle the situation and acts like nothing is wrong and I am angry because of that and would like to know wheather I should tell her that I want her to help me even if she has to cry, or wheather I should accept it and wait for professional help.

Tldr: My mom can't confront me and acts like everything is fine because she cannot handle the situation (my anxiety) and needs to cry and I want to talk to her but do not know if I should respect her wish not to talk or should be selfish because I need her and am angry at her for not wanting to cry in front of me

Probably not even that big of a problem, but quarantine sure makes it feel big",5.894809673085536,5.188475310344835,6.6915091804747,79.95733094491719,66.83251231527093,9.943394536497983,32.74025974025974,9.339509955726095,2.6608463054187195,1560,58,328,26,22,519,172,406,0.13699999999999998,0.7709999999999999,0.092,-0.9445,1,2,1,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,1,3,16,27,2,1,14,0,41,0,0,4,3,80,68,35,0,26,17,5,2,6,0,7,0,4,1,0,18,25,0,1,9,0,0,5,22,13,0,2,9,7,58,14,47,50,3,31,0,0,1,0,40,14,0,7,18,232,76,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07895145702409748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05473157003814087,0.08082525052222495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058875267788351004,0.0,0.06688472266448545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11947382575100812,0.3052912879546258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31435437802249994,0.04614047207425898,0.07375953901030577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08384996336297983,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09450932069582882,0.06471636036272646,0.0,0.0,0.12859969159395984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03617519650565723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06539064372670553,0.12171192701935725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213760272177642,0.0,0.04066055403272212,0.06000837709332195,0.0,0.0,0.07881465439735194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438648978945016,0.0,0.07176525976190938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149005782476316,0.07863829322872372,0.05831855442004081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097190289669419,0.07170667705540197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04775670420119359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08379239567398764,0.0,0.0,0.052593654154714745,0.1591486701376379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1372983149574115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07944202473870814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785346970964452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07713738643842086,0.4107522215390075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09166685150322444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061098861436983225,0.1361109615313483,0.05689529018033259,0.07162881786204718,0.0,0.057011936272770486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05918259124949653,0.2412580313850399,0.0,0.0,0.06061967007319252,0.055078676228639316,0.0,0.08008853716343466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08190166987580852,0.0,0.0,0.0674301197434982,0.0,0.0,0.28752496862563026,0.06253330165504442,0.0,0.08181770481979908,0.0,0.0,0.09168602769764723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457226522931929,0.0,0.0,0.07448065161398752,0.0,0.06179172917133435,0.0,0.0,0.16879588788624206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1291160933631931,0.0,0.08227297993407214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10164673500473267,0.07822299874073776,0.0,0.04607250034709921
mentalhealth,vajohna45,2020/04/18,"Saw a vulgar video then Idek what happened after (warning - gruesome details) Alright be me it’s 5 am I’m on my phone on fb and I keep seeing all this terrible shit about conflict and pedos in power so I’m getting all charged up letting the FB algorithm do it’s trick and I hop on this website that only has shocking content and I see a video titled “dog eats off alleged rapists wangus” and I’m like well he’s a rapist it can’t be that bad but I was grossly mistaken. I was watching looking in his eyes and I started to feel his hopelessness and fear. My heart started to race, and I got the spins. I closed the video but it wouldn’t stop it had just got more intense and I started sweating and my ears were ringing I woke up my gf in a hurry and told her to come outside. I stumbled out the door and fell over. I felt myself like falling in to a dream and I had to fight to stay with reality. I could barley hear my gf talking to me over the ringing in my ears. My skin was glossy and I had sweat drops on my forehead (mind you it’s around 45f outside) but the cold air kinda helped me breathe I started to steady myself and came back inside. This has happened before but I have no idea what it is. I can’t think of anything particular that would make me do that or trigger me to freak out. Idk I’m just here for insight thanks everybody 🙌🏻👍🏻",0.323531490334652,2.605680053003536,2.1247277073373527,94.65446217002705,87.69257950530034,4.318811057992102,23.517875701517358,5.7212163849143,0.3315351070463519,1057,43,228,7,34,347,160,283,0.17600000000000002,0.767,0.057,-0.985,1,0,0,0,1,1,16.0,0,1,0,1,8,16,5,1,11,1,22,13,10,2,2,46,50,22,0,3,7,0,3,2,2,2,0,5,1,0,16,22,1,3,5,4,0,4,4,11,1,0,14,15,37,5,31,30,3,33,0,1,6,2,13,19,1,2,10,148,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12530064533208654,0.1355476172910373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11708194160519092,0.12713443207350095,0.0,0.0,0.1295658081060968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17414993477912113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13116231692576605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12157075089994858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1558045163065235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713398064996958,0.07698946667161903,0.0,0.14619772313155285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07955187588299928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2435595353889087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692938505880576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17161306955523306,0.1804340729003389,0.10205963230388608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718879984685234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13533961418046528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1557006874712827,0.0,0.14877741058969018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786376549685888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10163768387185328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15374366026175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158039540397709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24267006078988465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15629724082955615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.43109416566604597,0.162293614161318,0.0,0.12729987453387873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238437453020873,0.0,0.14018462217870914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09756489329059008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14549518013216572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690400137667955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816427653270573,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,wannabe-wannabe,2020/04/18,"I’m detained under the Mental Health Act and was told that it’s as simple as acting normal to be let out I can’t act “normal” which is why I’m here in the first place.

People are quick to criticise things that they don’t understand. Why would you be so determined to make others feel inferior? What’s the point? Is that the only way these dipshits can feel good about themselves?",2.776597744360899,4.916089328947368,3.704812030075189,87.83868421052631,76.76315789473685,6.448120300751881,20.06766917293233,7.447530270364453,0.5717616541353387,303,7,60,4,7,97,57,76,0.11199999999999999,0.812,0.076,-0.426,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,1,1,4,2,0,0,4,0,11,1,0,1,0,9,18,4,0,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,9,2,0,0,3,0,0,3,2,1,0,1,2,2,3,1,9,12,0,11,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,0,2,41,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22726201642509905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19115651488636665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884941354567813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2388790953139243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22980320375788466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500100337102933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2264765132952121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4403783463466921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17091844665797312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15580053863518034,0.0,0.2347966052338599,0.0,0.21244392468916684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14930163509598424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21474059664552844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2339534364077753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17838141904492358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4055704815046657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15964282292558316,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jackbloo,2020/04/18,"My mental state has taken a nosedive At the time of writing i am currently 15, and life for me over the past two years has been painful. I suffer from ADHD, ADD and depression, and have suicidal thoughts, but i just cant bring myself to do anything to myself and how it would effect people who care for me, I have a good family aswell as a good life and friends who seem to care about me... but i just don't want to exist anymore. please help

​

Sorry for poor grammar at the moment, i'm extremely tired and just want some advice

I don't have much to say besides this.",11.463362068965516,6.1407768879310405,10.470000000000002,71.65,60.293103448275865,13.324137931034484,41.06896551724138,9.516144504307137,3.7797482758620693,453,14,92,5,4,145,77,116,0.161,0.6409999999999999,0.198,0.8777,1,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,0,0,1,5,8,0,0,6,0,12,4,0,2,0,21,21,10,1,3,5,0,0,0,1,1,4,1,0,0,4,7,0,0,3,0,1,1,3,3,0,1,3,1,12,5,15,17,2,10,0,2,0,0,6,3,0,2,5,64,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20436157379660624,0.16616643573574322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18424416297368346,0.20662382175185107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686393837039566,0.0,0.0,0.1399329081408476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.346745317611033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14645988812543775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16030370698216914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13137668496969074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.285252094297654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11397787389057615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2402162459366606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17136580819911545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12500296392841828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18094033703685036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16232761332693205,0.11788809723626045,0.0,0.0,0.18665882920774668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13522695884920646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548029819293214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19035194802533315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18600211164407413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13499708493731186,0.09915486341368654,0.1954422183496705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16610968611096186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20059441223307486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079540158837825,0.0,0.20662382175185107,0.1095036880692611
mentalhealth,rBulldOze,2020/04/18,"Boredom - is that a thing? I suffer from boredom i dunno if thats a thing, perhaps it is, maybe someone could shed some light or post a link with relevant info thanks",1.2495454545454552,3.775908424242424,2.6456818181818207,90.78852272727272,85.96969696969695,4.512121212121213,23.40151515151515,5.985473137389443,0.5786424242424246,130,5,25,1,4,42,26,33,0.23800000000000002,0.6759999999999999,0.085,-0.6369,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,8,4,2,0,2,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,2,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,18,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3288429129109237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41377654954906107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3944554879484585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3489742382793369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3791925209091021,0.0,0.0,0.5472533113676266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,justforquestions2121,2020/04/18,Why do I still care so much? Growing up I was an only child and pretty lonely because of that. Due to that I cared a lot about what other kids thought of me. I wanted them to like me and I was terrified of criticism from them. Terrified to the point where it could be described as obsessive. In middle/high school my friend group used to bully me a lot but I just stuck with them because I was afraid they would   talk about me to others and because I was just so desperate for friends. Now that I’m older I find myself being more of a loner and I should be done caring what others think. But I just can’t get over my anxiety over what others reactions would be if I acted like myself. I’m just so scared and I don’t know how to stop.,1.7352661064425767,3.5893424379084986,3.2486134453781514,91.23661764705885,78.86928104575163,6.201493930905696,20.078898225957047,7.1686216300943375,0.3741525676937445,575,14,124,7,14,189,90,153,0.192,0.6659999999999999,0.141,-0.8192,0,2,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,4,0,13,11,0,3,5,0,16,0,0,2,0,27,28,13,0,6,7,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,0,2,11,6,0,1,4,0,0,2,2,4,0,0,7,0,25,7,20,13,4,13,0,1,0,0,10,6,0,3,7,100,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12793674908265892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3058405247670274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5115314075874777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13352607753127976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1711427208370235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15285266570988446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2584156042816759,0.0,0.08737504595701727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17669631798674698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09190972944939046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16340825333596273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2843598383586582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1229393041391444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12719217106974165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1580941351863808,0.0,0.0,0.17014135111889747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1674345919826182,0.16925396543422186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13355662567399654,0.1398186059632216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13441971330412128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10715947223663876,0.0,0.13276843333498786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14444009088114135,0.0,0.0,0.09864141088789204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15090644419325625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376024079395064,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Camisado527,2020/04/18,"Triggered and I’m rambling nonsense I started watching mental hospital tik toks tonight and now I feel upset and panicky, I feel like they’re gonna take me away. That they’re gonna stick needles into me and stuff?? Idk but I hate it i hate it I hate it get it out of my head please 
I want to forget the hospital I never wanna go back EVER AGAIN I hate the hospital I don’t wanna go back please I just wanna be with the dreamfinder rn (this is gonna make no sense), i see him and figment and I think I belong there. I belong with them there, WHY AM I NOT THERE PLEASE LET ME BE THERE I’m crazy but thinking up stories and imagining people being with me has always been a thing for me. Ever since I was little. I don’t know why I feel so strongly about this and I’m probably gonna embarrass myself posting this anyway lol but I need to vent my mind is everywhere rn I’m sorry feel free to ignore me. 
I lost almost all of my friends. I messed up badly with her I love her and I want to be with her I tried apologizing but she doesn’t wanna be friends with me cus I fucked up so badly but I love her so much dreamfinder why are you not here? Why did you go away? I miss you dear please come back.",-1.4014149305555534,0.4505758203125012,0.9638229166666684,98.2849965277778,105.25,3.5255555555555564,15.45451388888889,5.537805323059119,-0.7349505902777782,934,25,210,8,45,311,128,256,0.237,0.599,0.163,-0.9638,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,0,3,1,2,18,21,5,2,4,1,17,4,1,2,4,51,53,17,0,7,8,0,4,1,2,4,0,0,0,0,10,18,0,1,8,0,1,4,7,13,0,0,4,6,49,9,25,39,2,23,0,2,2,3,15,8,1,1,11,142,59,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001444716270382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0832154201124153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879233157890839,0.2307020231990173,0.16700651580991738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08614881585605502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18092755952425485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2022700282399866,0.07144638137651034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15453326310883825,0.09245662071280218,0.05225052489982327,0.0,0.17051209544568824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3949523532501551,0.10263798861392208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05496227846900161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10226588068901156,0.0,0.048859299106792806,0.10023519561755206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1091715331924989,0.0,0.18052388188712026,0.0,0.06675672035336062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007854534174084,0.0,0.10098048423787424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0735180519990721,0.07415533549822863,0.07713303252429403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693335821033018,0.0,0.0,0.4391189802391969,0.0,0.0,0.09578088552186603,0.0,0.10782651402334573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07969414871116326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827283992878877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11195178076789294,0.07078681736691762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11448626876215552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07519424994225005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06644147231944933,0.12816333567611096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06789948141663951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797568606228738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.360969923780865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,soxrs,2020/04/18,"(M22)y girl(F19)riend is falling seriously hard Okay so full disclosure i live in nz we are on our 4th week of lock down because of the virus. She is a nurse for the elderly living in the retirement home to minimise exposures. Most of what im talking about is a direct symptom of this lock down. After talking last night she confessed things have really been going bad she sends this after breaking down:

""I’m so depressed right now. I’m drinking every time I get a chance, I take triple my normal dose of anti depressants, I take some anti agitation pills from work and sleeping pills, Bella has me addicted to weed and when we drink she offers me mdma and I’ve been taking it, I’ve started smoking again. I’m a huge mess rn""

The anti depressant is fluoxetine taking originally 20mg, the Bella she refers to is a friend of hers also in lockdown with her. Before this lockdown she had not tried MD or Weed and her biggest concern was telling me about it.
I've always tried to express that she can come to me with anything but it seems that she doesn't beleive me. I just want to know how address this in a helpful way",2.946888454011741,5.284193082191784,3.9410697977821267,85.38150684931509,77.08219178082193,6.36320939334638,26.410306588388767,7.447530270364453,1.5082005218525767,891,35,167,12,21,287,139,219,0.09699999999999999,0.848,0.055999999999999994,-0.5862,0,2,2,0,0,0,20.0,3,0,0,1,10,8,0,0,11,1,14,8,1,2,0,23,28,11,0,2,4,0,1,0,1,0,5,0,2,0,11,9,2,0,4,2,0,4,2,6,0,0,4,1,25,2,28,24,4,29,1,3,0,0,23,12,0,4,11,108,36,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15538403988913424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11398507865239432,0.11860042446194137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11729404770534467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11901065713667545,0.08688792968237335,0.0,0.1212866704453148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12278116379896024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3682952066017247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27925980481075835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12009176977458345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11012208178146714,0.0,0.07446858314368743,0.0,0.08100584750772873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12768324078040386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553811433704136,0.0,0.1429740894319186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15396211142586694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07833343323885329,0.1161849374314769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25172179123621713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337593135928367,0.13965390297759278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09131148321796108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12172399442656495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12975838627659536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14263780023336167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10088690983816608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1481482985512878,0.4286739139549276,0.2291282479270537,0.1245817529674276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469382968106133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08311322500176717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19354363183843848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08407075530156759,0.11313754000380905,0.11433286973655615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376707803512623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Evalidated,2020/04/18,"After life Recently I’ve been questioning myself a lot about life/reality and what might come after our time on earth has come to an end. Reincarnation, Heaven/Hell, waking up from a simulation and simply nothingness. Its come to the point where its literally all i think about, I’ve come attracted to the thought of death and what might be after it. Please note i am not contemplating suicide or ever have, I am just lost in a loop of questioning my life and everything around me i feel like im going insane questioning what might come after our life and if whats after our time here might be better then whats happening here in my life. I dont know what do to just stop thinking about this, its taking over my life.",6.631,6.615883385714284,6.996428571428571,76.07107142857146,65.14285714285714,10.714285714285717,28.92857142857143,10.411451182825502,2.7374285714285707,574,16,111,13,8,187,82,140,0.10800000000000001,0.792,0.1,0.1999,0,0,0,0,0,1,12.0,3,0,0,2,10,4,0,0,6,0,13,6,1,0,2,32,27,8,2,1,5,0,1,1,0,4,5,0,0,0,11,11,0,1,8,0,0,6,3,1,0,0,3,1,13,3,21,18,2,26,0,1,0,0,6,8,0,10,13,82,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608904258456184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09546371920115916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4649016230771872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265042941656297,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560236192506327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763746053429766,0.0,0.0,0.09700906573200804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05457745616942737,0.07711200284036593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06134450728411343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0954505464354905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11659318625041805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059320728240661584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4574451806720983,0.05273378915646516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11782871875992355,0.09176630588995977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4580270225382656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184851611763932,0.10203771990208926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36275084097884536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657723774969707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09024225810499782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806829749676245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0811570733662422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13832655082425607,0.0,0.08569190878904757,0.1258807849900124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Andrew010415,2020/04/18,"Cannot open to my girlfriend about my mental health issues.. Hi .. when I was young I was beaten up by my parents from an early stage for a long period of time.. I found it hard to socialise with people around me..and never had friends. Have been in several relationships which ended up badly because could never find a girl who'd commit & help..

I was also went to a therapist whilst at school..but did not find that very helpful 

Fast-forward several years, I ended up at university in a different country..I came here for love, together with a girl who seemed to be committed and wanting to help but due to my mental problems I have started over-thinking all sorts of weird scenarios and we had an argument over the phone.. ended up in a foreign country (UK) where I barely knew the language, alone ... and fall into a deep depression which I never came out from..

​

A year and half later I met this girl who was perfect.. smart, also came from a different country so understood my struggles, we got along well for some times until my mental issues, anxiety & bipolarism.. mood swings came up again..  However, what I felt for this girl and the way she made me feel helped me fight this although it has been mentally draining .. did not want to eat.. I was feeling weak because of this fight I had everyday to try to hide this from her.. We ended up being together until yesterday.. 5 years and 17 days.. as we got through the relationship it got harder for me to fight this so I started over-reacting, over-thinking.. always been in a bad emotional state.. but couldn't ever open about to her about my problems, in fact I was blaming her..

After many fights and arguments she had enough of my bullshit(I don't blame her.. I made her life so difficult) .. but now after she left me it is not worth living for..anything This girl was perfect, out of everyone I met she was the only one who managed to make me want to fight this.. but the burden of not opening up to her about it led to a lot of fights...mean arguments..

I am now worse than any point before.. I even had thoughts of suicide ..but still find it hard to open about my mental health..which I believe started when I was very young..I don't want to lose her but she is now more serious than ever before..I don't want to live anymore I stopped eating and drinking water for past 24h and I am in a terrible mood..",4.291580962102849,5.664003449023862,5.03026221768534,83.14784834758201,70.90889370932754,8.026566288120454,28.52628556845732,8.4952907291091,2.0673281357662368,1854,69,356,30,34,599,218,461,0.201,0.738,0.06,-0.9967,4,1,1,0,6,2,95.0,4,0,0,4,24,27,6,1,20,0,35,9,0,4,11,77,65,26,1,9,10,1,5,0,2,0,4,0,0,5,22,28,4,1,11,1,1,7,12,19,1,2,36,5,52,6,73,24,5,78,0,2,0,1,44,28,0,4,40,249,74,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07098829564005284,0.0,0.10962518337591506,0.057031996792101976,0.2227939740822496,0.08328539268248554,0.046610552446665995,0.0,0.05243403971054562,0.0,0.06797472418443715,0.0,0.0,0.05640379267454075,0.06101644315517229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11445853498143065,0.08356449227561867,0.0,0.058323745729777235,0.07722276935358452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135727446425521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0547247894125012,0.0,0.0,0.044203580188162964,0.0,0.059034670791296165,0.0,0.0,0.1432225032409625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714455013287514,0.0,0.14027007781515174,0.0,0.07709993238870118,0.2428296057489511,0.07082166453690418,0.0,0.0452709968938259,0.12399937391952975,0.0,0.06549431532112109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0693132570029542,0.0,0.06581056341048536,0.0,0.1879369954566364,0.0,0.0,0.07515218803249939,0.05295497249181951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16445663350225673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279939488631365,0.0,0.0,0.1457127626215905,0.0,0.0,0.18376761989219006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14307898164395436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07447051163423711,0.0,0.04841286982769708,0.0,0.0,0.12104675388318673,0.0606570472764282,0.0,0.07668037674718152,0.0,0.05827150980266387,0.06186135597690736,0.12971119919932558,0.04575196587244156,0.06949029623770124,0.0,0.0746617583901589,0.0,0.0,0.34536842139517177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15859022970314798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046445476389985085,0.05212887928262448,0.0,0.0,0.07610719511486289,0.0,0.06543059219658004,0.04751802762947893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06479384712996943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311698670460355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14717578346790092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06936763055477868,0.0,0.06239758334296585,0.0,0.15486471126422294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554202342087935,0.0,0.054737309368962365,0.057303741027623166,0.0,0.07165443017364267,0.0,0.07497324740538756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07958193370265684,0.0,0.0878372174204108,0.0,0.05441427389479668,0.07993416892370611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046535161405276915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11310778795525575,0.20213768493751086,0.054405031413982216,0.0,0.0,0.06162701628151851,0.06353863273036099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06984961727737278,0.0,0.0,0.08328539268248554,0.1324153853660939
mentalhealth,Tara101_jc,2020/04/18,Sleep paralysis Hi i used to have cerebral cramp but not in a severe way just lip shivering in a couple of years i experienced sleep paraylsis with a shivering i am a teenager does that relate,3.05337837837838,5.7912942702702725,4.601283783783781,78.54895270270273,79.27027027027026,8.024324324324324,28.16891891891892,8.841846274778883,2.8310594594594596,156,7,27,4,4,52,29,37,0.044000000000000004,0.87,0.086,0.3348,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,0,2,4,3,1,0,5,3,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,5,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,18,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3675463252266045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29068937646370024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3752642270615758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6648316049465048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28689333267086903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26366577505181943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21391039458385872
mentalhealth,VAS_4x4,2020/04/18,"I just want to help a friend (she maybe has PTSD?) **TLDR**: My gf has something close to PTSD, I don't know what to do and I need help to help her.

**HER BACKGROUND/CONTEXT**

I have recently started dating this girl (well quarantine is a bit in the way) and I think that she has some kind of not very strong PTSD. I already knew that she had some kind mental illness due to something during her childhood before I started dating her and I want to help her. I'll be 17 in June and she is 17 (she is 1 grade up, last year high school here so she is pretty stressed out). She had what I believe was her traumatic event when she was 5 and, well, her cousin that was 13 or so sexually harassed her, for all I know it has only happened once. She has told me that her cousin kept giving her ""the looks"" until she entered adolescence (maybe it was the time around when her cousin started getting conscious of his actions). Her father wasn't very supportive either and she once feared him, she fears a lot of people that want to get close (specially new). I think that I  managed to surround that because I'm the ""brother"" (not literally, but we are pretty much siblings) of her best friend. Her parents divorced after having their second child (her little sister) when she was around 8, her sister birthed when my friend was 6 or so (there were already problems in within the couple and I think she blames herself of her parent's divorce). Now she gets along with her father pretty well and lives with her grandma, she told me that she doesn't live with her mum because of the fear of what once happened in that house (i have no idea what happened in that house). She has not yet been able to talk to me much about her father or what happened at what once was her home. I didn't dig this all up, I was there for her so that she could tell me anything and I listened (it's what I believe is best, so that she doesn't fell pressured to tell you, she tells you because she wants it and needs it in some shape or another). Her ex doesn't leave her alone with a lot of Instagram accounts. She gets some flashbacks and as we mainly text i don't know what to do, but she seems to be aware of that and gets out of it  on her own (I feel proud of her because she is strong enough to get her out of it, I don't know why I feel proud of her, maybe I just feel happy). She has asked me why someone like me would get close to her if didn't want to harm her, why someone would love her. I do. I think that she has managed to put on a character to stop herself from thinking about that (in the good way, she loves dancing and she mainly puts that on when she is dancing or in a situation close to dancing \[modern dance\]) She is seeing a psychologist and I know that she has either diagnosed something or is suspicious.

**MY BACKGROUND**

My parents also got divorced but wasn't nearly as traumatic and I also had some incest (a couple of french kisses are the only things that I remember) with my cousin when I was 5 i think and she is 6 years older than me. I have no sequels that I can see from that. It is true that I may think that I may have lacked some love, not because I didn't have it but because I didn't want it. Now I have all the love I need, I express it, I give it and I am grateful to her because of that. I will probably see a psychologist in the future. (my mum recommended it to me also)

**WHAT I NEED HELP WITH**

* I need to know if I'm close enough thinking that she has some form of PTSD. For the information that I have searched she's got pretty much all the PTSD symptoms \[a traumatic event, she tends to avoid some things \[new people in particular\], the ""why would people love me?"", low self esteem\].
* I need to find reliable sources of information about PTSD and other mental illnesses. Mainly big sites where I can keep educating myself.
* I need to know how to act, even though she seems to be able to take care of herself. The more supportive I can be the better. I've not been able to find much about that.
* I need to know if what I'm doing is good enough or even positive. (I think I'm helping her)
* I would love to find a sub where people that know someone that has some kind of mental illness and actively tries to help them shares their stories and most importantly , or make it myself. I think that it would be very helpful to people like me because we eat a lot of shit (like you <3) and we don't know what to do \[maybe I am the helper or something like that\]. I would still keep following that because I think it would help a lot of people (the helpers and the helped).

​

Thank you a lot, you do an amazing work in this sub.

TLDR:

My gf has something close to PTSD, I don't know what to do and I need help to help her.",1.9716046808017609,3.9854279916579753,2.92499930483142,93.07049745104857,78.78102189781022,5.638656007415133,22.438662959100924,6.588339656340683,0.3899352705364385,3680,113,795,33,90,1167,307,959,0.07,0.737,0.193,0.9992,3,3,5,0,3,0,150.0,4,5,3,8,38,51,2,6,33,0,91,15,1,2,5,160,181,58,0,28,25,16,3,4,5,10,5,1,1,3,65,45,1,5,36,4,1,11,21,11,3,1,27,8,166,40,103,138,38,86,0,1,4,8,150,39,1,31,38,574,231,5,0.1101320122411192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03802118353491138,0.08102227607603042,0.08807253039962294,0.0,0.03977599641686132,0.044607483140802325,0.0,0.03849433914061889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.030209754072949138,0.06536056015807076,0.034319521572202534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2014063573614172,0.0,0.03123807693706892,0.08272070938438386,0.07705116816123649,0.03246760501474191,0.040078544475403634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037428975464557576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029310483417045376,0.08123931786696481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037260558054696864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03756418100322078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11379580878765075,0.0,0.04849410360367617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12392913229323207,0.05568605448582315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10065866397875477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08508771946322027,0.0,0.13425867201788766,0.07043244098624868,0.0,0.0615823377932809,0.0587217539600054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298524996110211,0.03907919164237255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952766652881536,0.03878683919993292,0.03682379596441607,0.0,0.0,0.08471837034616182,0.0,0.0414418788352068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06526026182680303,0.0,0.11468554317847646,0.22192747033151267,0.029924096366792576,0.0,0.03887129971870875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717399175975956,0.036793736327780886,0.06483238968060487,0.0,0.030827717608826962,0.0,0.0,0.1560504974156203,0.19879688177689556,0.0,0.02450465778667915,0.0,0.14752321205967686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098716501332244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1079462679319508,0.24498447479738955,0.0,0.07091078913231941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1563826649556591,0.0,0.055840238698606666,0.0,0.0,0.12228856634882405,0.0,0.0,0.15270334074886915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14939179949642134,0.03958031210171086,0.035127154020537975,0.3003896670915885,0.07380872731214437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03624735855438355,0.0,0.04158603363882578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037153158685177344,0.08776095491647963,0.06684003178347242,0.03829723588895754,0.0,0.03768297597532229,0.0,0.04126433203648185,0.0,0.0,0.09331449658001223,0.1413083393108578,0.0,0.0,0.07795200511062032,0.0,0.02931718907969253,0.03069176453954755,0.04205194930832465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08331766824522042,0.0,0.03815644317095486,0.02760185570242886,0.029506646570977717,0.09626023296367314,0.03379825338971041,0.0,0.0,0.04877787684634986,0.25874987053065385,0.03606804761871052,0.0,0.021406287331992763,0.0,0.0,0.07015723820005915,0.0,0.024924135685523846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087044405630593,0.12991742848371568,0.05827844339585831,0.0,0.0,0.09902190532772354,0.0,0.13250268147854666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02672580552582333,0.0,0.0,0.18254745052668303,0.0,0.044607483140802325,0.04728093670894926
mentalhealth,CoolGirlsClubUK,2020/04/18,"Wellness: Video on how to survive the lockdown... [https://youtu.be/-GZZnuC5koI](https://youtu.be/-GZZnuC5koI)

Are you jealous of those who seem to have blasted through getting shit done since the lockdown has started? Don't worry! I still don't have a six pack, Mari Kondo is still waiting in my closet and I have certainly not done 30 YouTube videos like I said I would.  No you are not useless! You just haven't dealt with current reality yet. In this video, I show you my 3 steps to go from Procrastinator to Lockdown surfer.  I always say that a breakdown is an opportunity for a breakthrough! And Covid-19 is no exception to the rule.

Please share this video with those you think would benefit!",5.5657162534435285,8.671829090909092,4.1408471074380175,83.33430096418735,72.14049586776859,6.347382920110194,29.918044077134986,7.492282038375204,1.9085366391184573,564,24,96,7,12,162,80,121,0.085,0.731,0.185,0.9002,1,3,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,5,0,2,6,9,2,0,7,0,16,1,1,1,1,15,23,3,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,2,0,2,1,0,6,4,0,1,2,5,0,2,7,3,1,1,3,2,13,6,15,18,0,10,0,1,0,0,9,3,1,1,6,70,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19426637668004296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4778432970548806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219788368334468,0.0,0.1326868142050573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11406202109874328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2562807863832949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22208415863501987,0.1856653205272424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21254301289530952,0.0,0.0,0.2396543818112612,0.1931294266914364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16525180679261364,0.0,0.3729001037465157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14959863695569772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20991825347189244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2371008914381165,0.0,0.3317018610043944,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nihal247,2020/04/18,"Productivity during the lockdown. I see a lot of posts where people have been asked to utilise this period well, given tips on how to build some skills, muscle, planning your life and a lot of other things that basically include a lot of discipline. 
Now, utilising your time during the lockdown or in general, is obviously a good thing to do.

However, a lot of you feel pressurised to do something worthwhile and if you fail at it, you end up feeling lost and depressed because you're not part of a rat race which you did not sign up for.

Taking a break is one of the most underrated skill in the world. Know that it's completely okay to do nothing for a while. Your mind and body needs some rest. Am I asking you to be complacent? No, never. But it's genuinely okay you aren't getting those abs or if you haven't set your life plans after the lockdown.

You don't have to compare your journey with anybody else. Your life is just gonna be a series of experiences, it's not a race. Everyone has a different story to tell.

Do not freak out if you're unable to do anything productive right now. You're only human.
While you're at it, there is absolutely no need to hold anything against the ones who are using this time to do the things they love.

Remember you can absolutely do nothing and still stay happy, it's all about acceptance and not worrying. 
Don't fall into the loop of feeling guilty. Rather just embrace your existence and move along your life at your own pace. 

TL;DR : Do whatever you wish to do. Do not judge anybody for what they do. Keep a check on your mental health.


Love y'all :)",3.663373732376946,5.585378257234727,4.517443729903537,83.97956900816227,73.5016077170418,7.742814741528567,26.75253524610438,8.502166056373571,1.887830967103636,1262,46,246,23,26,407,170,311,0.06,0.8079999999999999,0.132,0.9684,2,3,1,0,0,0,37.0,0,21,2,6,11,12,0,0,20,2,29,8,1,2,3,53,48,16,0,7,15,0,3,0,0,1,5,0,0,1,18,11,0,3,6,0,1,3,13,4,1,2,4,4,25,8,39,41,11,32,0,3,1,2,30,14,0,12,11,178,43,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19012583905050506,0.0,0.2159907630817044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041977345568991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12831641124933627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12112027046217233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09949699998039103,0.0,0.0,0.12069356203015025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09650193627436196,0.0,0.10231621924282808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11038408113189777,0.0,0.11300049174445018,0.0,0.0,0.17523078484789045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06035430667659838,0.0,0.0,0.09689249385617522,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12297293255814043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12279210288948235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267927046439296,0.0,0.0,0.06348663897104588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32638009113839195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610346417164514,0.3928430755675741,0.2085221871120788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11641674750170522,0.0,0.11664202657731933,0.0,0.0,0.1227792229808227,0.0,0.17131287652887373,0.08909596044810307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22168865053267128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1565583580469438,0.08785798296898094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1250966427177556,0.0,0.08008685626168598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11063599743018884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13086136880280172,0.09865324381620397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09205429229401392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893275500169454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1231286937237264,0.09225422952664744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08685648287806386,0.0,0.10096936194416804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23023858635492844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13472100203542006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09977198233148417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10386613756907476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13284202287947625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11731592370150475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RetroMiner11,2020/04/18,"I'm 16 stone and eat to feel happy. I am a 22 year old female and have struggled with my weight all my life. Currently I am 5 foot 2 inches and just under 16 stone. I have no self confidence and don't want to leave the house. I have suffered with depression and anxiety since I was 15 and put on the pounds since then. I find that food is the only thing that brings me joy and I cant help my self but eat i desperately want to lose weight but simply don't know how. 

In the past I have self harmed and tried to end it all but I honestly think that I have just given up on everything. I just hide inside my house eating and when I have to go out (work) I try and hide myself away as much as possible and talk to no one as I am embarrassed. 

I want help and to be rid of this I just dont know how.",0.5372071428571417,2.0903513314285758,2.5659107142857174,96.1471517857143,81.39999999999998,6.432142857142857,17.223214285714285,7.413659706084162,-0.11345000000000027,613,11,154,9,16,206,97,175,0.21600000000000005,0.7170000000000001,0.067,-0.9669,1,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,2,7,9,0,2,5,0,16,8,1,2,2,34,27,22,0,3,7,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,3,6,15,6,0,5,0,0,3,6,6,0,1,2,3,23,3,20,24,3,18,0,3,0,0,6,8,0,0,7,99,29,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0966444879055293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1186941210579623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10881052764181454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14806147100230066,0.0,0.0,0.3878109501122689,0.0,0.0,0.11189364306784948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11354005860097033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06387781930492367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546617925223758,0.0,0.15276250526050328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07179802113677893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448395107339542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16935684925423292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915429079729889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13885875324896882,0.0,0.0,0.1337685287190537,0.0,0.0,0.08923281590286891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14133444197785044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286937629088296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13256535366202585,0.0,0.08560658888801365,0.0960820274609731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205992540552279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424216063234267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269996749609504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3953789764642247,0.0,0.0,0.2090081179927408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13207080264123605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10154177317958524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393010867906434,0.08094915958702036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715437860001323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22354363487960607,0.0,0.0,0.3076794017518503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919720130248246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135438467176803
mentalhealth,Jastar22,2020/04/18,"Why does my self-esteem disappear when I’m in the relationship... So I’ve been in my current relationship close to 5 years now. I love him so much, he treats me like an absolute princess and has always supported me, no matter what. Through mental health issues, suicidal ideation, and everything in between, he always tries to make me feel beautiful, smart and special. 

Problem is I pick myself apart constantly, I’m almost 25, and over the years my confidence seems to be slipping more and more. It’s at the point where I can’t stand to have my photo taken, I hate my body no matter what, I think I’m stupid and all my ambitions and goals I once had feel like an impossibility; now that I have no self-confidence. I don’t believe anything I do is good, no matter what anyone says I just don’t think I’m good enough, or talented, and feel like I have to embrace a life of mediocrity - which is saddening. 

Now, I went to drama school to get a qualification so this hasn’t always been the case for me. I obviously never used to have any of these fears, and I truly believed I could achieve anything I put my mind to. I literally dropped out of high school because I was that confident my audition would get me accepted, before I even heard back! I’ve recently come to the realization that every time I get in a long term relationship my self-esteem and confidence starts to dip into oblivion. It happened in my first long term relo, that lasted 3 1/2 years, and he also was very kind to me, never insulted me or anything like that, but it wasn’t until I was single again that I regained my confidence. 

This is the only common denominator I can see, but I can’t understand how being in a relationship, with someone so great, can be such a self-esteem killer?! I don’t want to have to be single to be confident. 

Has anyone else found this? What did you do to Combat it? I seriously can’t live my life with no confidence, it’s horrible for my mental health and it really stops me living my best life. :(",6.416823994419904,6.204222378516628,7.30606951871658,74.33685828877009,65.62404092071611,10.689653568937457,32.094977912113464,10.33465798735191,3.152252173913044,1574,56,303,35,22,529,191,391,0.102,0.722,0.17600000000000002,0.9803,1,0,0,0,0,0,53.0,0,1,0,5,16,22,3,1,13,0,37,7,1,4,4,50,65,24,1,4,5,0,3,4,0,1,5,2,0,0,21,18,0,1,9,1,1,4,15,6,0,1,12,6,51,16,36,46,10,46,0,0,1,1,13,15,0,4,29,206,72,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0830943344780535,0.0,0.0,0.06636055419184815,0.20714263623971801,0.0,0.0,0.056430502486685415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604567566275432,0.08502471003577458,0.20486097218571986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06380791926240507,0.0,0.050584964580217114,0.0,0.07061144109379508,0.18698425353454004,0.08708433033163132,0.0,0.0,0.09217412666333684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07148151468900998,0.0,0.08967389828797658,0.0,0.06625425365981423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07261797474718162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06932068634717456,0.0,0.0,0.08574243185239988,0.0,0.054808728253434434,0.0,0.0699157862620275,0.0,0.07457873464918366,0.0,0.0,0.0933776497868052,0.12587434764287742,0.11856449816733446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058431786506549,0.0,0.0909853136475998,0.0,0.0,0.13006377253202905,0.0,0.0,0.1392024747960192,0.0,0.09148778082215044,0.0,0.0,0.07338057449596963,0.0,0.0,0.08192739551836142,0.0,0.1764116489043592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08767487886331927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661149037753045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08641282552669123,0.0,0.06764128189278618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17583760078742758,0.16216295822951665,0.0,0.14654898488548074,0.1468726491102687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489435801643883,0.0,0.05539102817735928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16725237131367146,0.0,0.08378801142680606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061001206594178736,0.0,0.12800143432280695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08837296032061161,0.0,0.06311143502004721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07844466884990092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0794024219836184,0.0,0.08341967739097461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05316029696222222,0.0,0.08193456429871641,0.35636580040403776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599049650204022,0.0,0.1679641215579245,0.06612578948552977,0.07554355821093163,0.34627266223540304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07031025087033768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0587349794088429,0.0,0.0,0.0693765409508028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907686736600185,0.09416681819469523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063428356001081,0.0,0.0,0.04838738312940739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05633922799785696,0.0,0.0,0.08638703070542611,0.0,0.07166967379569696,0.0,0.06846871549930637,0.04894484417695396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07692500483434403,0.07487821118791142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058947924243932665,0.0,0.0,0.16031276912512227
mentalhealth,Velox7101,2020/04/18,"I'm terrified of death I have a really good life, family, freinds, good school, and I never got bored but in lockdown a thought slipped into my head. I can't stop thinking about the fact there is nothing after death and my family will one day be gone. When I'm with my friends or doing something fun I'm fine, but at night trying to sleep or cycling etc. It's always there. I know I should and I will live life to the fullest but I just start panicking and get terrified of it all I just want to think normally again.",1.9546226415094343,3.9843521981132106,3.12701886792453,91.52316981132078,78.90566037735849,6.881509433962264,23.807547169811322,7.908726449838941,1.173452075471698,407,14,88,7,10,131,72,106,0.16699999999999998,0.662,0.171,-0.5374,0,1,1,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,0,7,6,0,0,4,0,8,4,2,0,3,24,20,10,2,3,7,0,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,2,6,0,1,4,0,0,1,2,1,0,1,3,0,11,5,11,13,2,12,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,2,8,55,13,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16481983596379027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12774630462586598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22091344741387745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3734675813096745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303742408642815,0.0,0.10348950869174256,0.0,0.0,0.3322830511109571,0.15842402441683898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20328896284062764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088605177888836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27982191444653703,0.0,0.0,0.174909763300967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527728124291128,0.0,0.0,0.18588624977539686,0.1940780017010501,0.19006472602772195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13422528107796414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12689620424102468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20046924765605856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19822474450116925,0.0,0.0,0.1524929641068524,0.0,0.0,0.14020324131096326,0.0,0.0,0.16560516425040064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25384550043937393,0.0,0.15725473772419535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344844666288873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11683371422167928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flamingpizza246,2020/04/18,"Mental disorders? Im definitely not sure but I believe i have the following: bipolar disorder, depression, borderline personality disorder, psychotic disorder, and anxiety. I really don't want to ask for help irl as i did a while ago but it  only lead to more problems but  I'm also not sure if i should just leave it. Also I don't feel sad nor happy more just neutral but a lot of the time it switches to weird feelings. I also have very strong urges to cut myself and just thinking about it makes me feel tingly and numb on parts of my body, I can't seem to control those feelings. What should i do and should i feel worried? Again I'm not 100% sure i have all of those above.
I live in Canada btw",2.9069047619047623,4.7625580714285745,4.552857142857143,83.20047619047621,75.42857142857143,8.095238095238095,26.666666666666664,8.841846274778883,2.1104523809523807,550,21,110,12,12,185,85,140,0.289,0.626,0.085,-0.9826,0,0,0,0,0,1,14.0,0,0,0,3,8,11,1,0,4,0,11,3,1,3,4,35,24,15,0,6,11,0,5,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,7,4,0,1,7,0,0,2,7,6,0,0,1,5,15,5,13,20,5,8,0,2,0,0,3,2,0,3,4,76,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11237973181607397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3041494011502098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09698368742616573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11851892850794933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1428337195935079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082012910435338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14219064226362768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919242711291917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5811874810878189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205100774598534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13495595824862075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08497562606782193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13694039179988654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423802492935072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11194598592217483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10778085998618354,0.0,0.0,0.08462430859419473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12776090956318606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964192528771644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13728661210610835,0.0,0.0,0.11069636341776212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12130800388021495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08121628218717415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11541257840305652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3584560968242871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123327218074301,0.0,0.0,0.07392440575208901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10460390247512563,0.07477607356308852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1287477054633401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Practical_Breath,2020/04/18,"People here would probably benefit.... from being less whiny, dramatic and histrionic",11.652499999999995,15.542732583333333,10.723333333333336,39.55500000000001,56.5,18.133333333333336,45.33333333333334,14.554592549557764,10.269733333333336,69,4,6,4,1,22,12,12,0.0,1.0,0.0,0.0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4730615497707841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7356980020773508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4847279854391101,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NuclearTacoTruck,2020/04/18,"My Mental Health was getting better Before COVID-9 hit hard near me, I was feeling great. I wasn’t calling off of work, I wasn’t cancelling social obligations, I was trying to get in shape, and I was keeping the house and myself clean.
Now my anxiety is so bad I’m making myself physically ill. I have generalized anxiety disorder which is a bitch and a half on a normal day. My normal coping mechanisms aren’t working because I can’t pass my thoughts off as irrational anymore. There’s real fucking danger. My anxiety kicks up my depression, so now I feel fucked. If I get worse and feel suicidal I’m afraid to go to the hospital.",3.5731594634873365,5.822022426229513,5.17807749627422,77.69248137108795,74.7377049180328,8.370789865871833,29.943368107302533,9.095868883498916,2.9691540983606566,504,23,88,12,11,170,80,122,0.313,0.606,0.081,-0.9838,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,3,5,9,4,1,5,0,11,4,0,1,0,15,26,8,1,3,1,0,4,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,1,4,0,1,4,0,0,2,4,7,0,1,7,4,18,2,11,18,0,12,0,1,0,2,2,7,3,1,3,57,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3666005476304776,0.0,0.15841853401982212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333757035086741,0.09737563867486164,0.0,0.13592644042197635,0.0,0.0,0.14127649367056944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1631117589972562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10301868019112452,0.0,0.13758328724842606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830751597658961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2423070787184121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29535295127382943,0.2503716869996847,0.0,0.09078356644356483,0.0,0.0,0.17611322183245506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14309510152352325,0.0,0.0,0.16979548294934976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843177885550242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198369363443686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662727137179837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1609797161242172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130213378450198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18181837701687656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16283417355289165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17472894648958667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12681521850353272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10845254818831034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2325843309659262,0.0,0.16278806723662267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,r1pcur113,2020/04/18,"I've been having hallucinatory encounters with a threatening voice and I don't know what to make of it. I've been having infrequent, random ""visits"" from a singular voice lately.  This voice comes at times when I'm most vulnerable, and immediately starts communicate very directly.  He always commands me to harm myself, and whenever I don't comply he screams, and it's one of the most chilling sounds I've ever heard.  During these episodes, I feel very frightened and almost lose control of my body, slipping away into a trance or pulling my hair and acting in sheer panic.  While I can definitely make out the tone of voice of this apparition in my mind, this hallucination doesn't manifest in a traditional sense.  I don't perceive his words like I would any other sound, but I still hear his voice and the sentences he's conveying to me.

I don't know exactly what this could mean, but I am very worried.  I am refraining from self diagnosing, but I still want some background as to what these experiences could mean, and if they're indicative of a disorder.  I do have a history of mental illness in my family, as my grandpa was bipolar.  I'm unsure whether this is psychosis or not, because I'm not experiencing multiple voices all at once, just one.  It's been the same person the last two times. Also, I'm not undergoing any delusions.  What could this possibly mean, and should I seek help?",6.875538461538461,7.571340361538464,7.403653846153849,70.92509615384617,64.61538461538461,10.807692307692307,33.94230769230769,10.686352973137794,3.742884615384616,1114,46,197,28,16,367,149,260,0.106,0.848,0.046,-0.9286,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,0,2,6,5,0,1,11,0,22,5,2,3,3,52,39,21,0,7,11,1,2,1,0,2,3,11,0,2,16,13,0,2,7,0,0,4,8,4,0,3,5,14,23,1,25,29,5,23,0,1,0,0,12,9,0,8,11,131,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278226530212044,0.0,0.0,0.10208135303135216,0.10621470759421492,0.0,0.0,0.17361223444356225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1199310176509876,0.0,0.0,0.07781402205387121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14178994854495214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995884264452062,0.0,0.0,0.14316990034282107,0.3057534979947653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295616748037588,0.0,0.0,0.14629752074958272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11546638714701715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486581999917612,0.12033669889539413,0.0,0.06454348207207593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14387039626363962,0.0,0.08556084790124714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14030578295249996,0.10405147546581107,0.1439943286155447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06236315530073287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14280727052404416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17041422185220942,0.0,0.0,0.4171435658191187,0.0,0.0,0.12864079097382686,0.0,0.12888972490385633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13594267665145893,0.17299736889168324,0.0,0.0,0.14976932254126032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1114587223640927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14390576407331745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13316639044547246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09035105630657647,0.0,0.20388229892464688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1488670370418064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12469512812555646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31597290906951897,0.07529105171496472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12963438287575965,0.0,0.09067862585676674,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,philmorrisssss,2020/04/18,"I haven't slept and I feel fucking great. I cant cry and I feel myself deteriorating bit by bit I'm slowly losing it, I'm over the edge It Could honestly be nothing but I'm not being able to sleep and I'm super energised, but I'll crash and be depressed for days on end and not be hygienic or think of living. Just feeling like I'm in an abysmall of shit emotions and thoughts of getting fucked up",1.448029411764704,3.3428963176470603,3.5466911764705884,88.55886029411766,79.94117647058823,6.132352941176473,24.742647058823533,7.1686216300943375,0.9886764705882358,317,12,69,4,8,108,58,85,0.20199999999999999,0.593,0.205,-0.4009,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,2,1,9,3,0,2,0,7,5,3,0,0,18,21,9,0,1,6,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,5,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,3,5,4,10,14,2,6,0,2,0,2,0,4,3,1,3,38,7,0,0.2007064257000284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4382388687118465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16024774929097446,0.0,0.22046658418378756,0.12943904054819586,0.0,0.17286815035742795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257677145661761,0.17776632034693088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3044495981618056,0.1433847106231404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3710997128388392,0.10486082357603482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221279542890208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09805502152387843,0.0,0.17722745100530327,0.0,0.0,0.224539151642908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19258322854141244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060222617522416,0.0,0.0,0.20085137348033624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12860457341830706,0.0,0.15933848288051836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,KhaoticTenacity,2020/04/18,"Request for info on evaluation without insurance in the U.S. I'm searching for info on how to receive a mental evaluation from a trained professional when I have no money to pay for it and no insurance.

This didn't come from abuse or physical trauma or anything like that. I believe my situation is just a product of my circumstances and past decisions.

If anybody can point me in the right direction I would much appreciate it. 

Also please spare me the self harm and suicide info. That's not a symptom or concern I have. My fear rests more in my mental health directly effecting my physical health. To put it clearly, my chest and stomach hurt when my mind wanders, whether I am driving trying to sleep or anytime my mind is not actively engaged.

 No I'm not on drugs, I quit drinking in January (unrelated as I had a cold and have just been drinking hot tea ever since and never really drank much to begin with. At most 2 beers a night right before going to bed) 

I thought I could handle this alone like I do anything else but it's become worse as I try to fight it.",4.833333333333336,6.227910980676332,6.038376811594205,76.34973913043478,69.62801932367151,8.998260869565216,33.12367149758454,9.3871,3.2042923671497583,851,40,153,18,15,285,127,207,0.136,0.802,0.061,-0.9247,0,1,4,0,2,1,17.0,0,0,0,2,7,8,1,1,9,0,13,12,3,2,3,36,20,19,1,3,13,0,1,2,0,1,4,0,1,1,9,8,5,0,6,3,2,5,9,5,0,0,5,2,21,3,25,13,5,23,0,1,0,0,4,11,0,6,9,109,30,2,0.0,0.15715045194657715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13736956705311046,0.0,0.1060679358666744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2182941429990725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14648462517654734,0.11286237579839485,0.14943390733780146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1142530650628296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10589802953976564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2598630576650949,0.15381416385636298,0.0,0.11079928736654797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11997569568758472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14925093211750648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07537936666673425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2819690053827251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14198820857000194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12959724691051092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2673291989509477,0.0,0.2678465100433525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1950035573878895,0.0,0.1022960710013301,0.0,0.0,0.12446869768806686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12661484602542766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455930906334857,0.12538267960510646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1333345252956234,0.0,0.14107334865937302,0.0,0.0,0.08496919649798537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22653864851285285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13836693717244122,0.0,0.0,0.10971680913381283,0.14908697993008227,0.1327305049589306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14508085373489268,0.0,0.0,0.13785825667072826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052971504533508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18010053396415773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1278551348319919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13516610869023846,0.09421989801506354,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,abeilleebee,2020/04/18,"everything feels hazy? literally don't know what's wrong with me. i don't know what to do. wtf i just feel exhausted, time feels weird and i can't focus, can't concentrate on anything. it's like a fog has just came over me and left me with no energy. migraines? also, i keep procrastinating. it's like i want to do thing, but i cant do thing even though i'm internally yelling at myself to do the thing. like what? 

at the same time, i can't sleep properly. caffeine / chocolate cravings are up a stupid amount. sex drive is up by a stupid amount. usually am a lot more extroverted, don't feel like seeing people irl much at all. i'm not depressed. yo, like, i just feel stupid, i can't seem to cry, but i feel guilty for not crying because of recent events going on. lmao none of this is logical.",0.6459259259259262,3.049578839506175,2.4282592592592596,92.0801666666667,87.76543209876543,5.956049382716049,19.21111111111111,7.365786028017652,0.4891348148148151,620,18,136,11,20,204,93,162,0.142,0.6629999999999999,0.195,0.8037,0,0,0,0,1,0,27.0,0,0,0,0,6,12,3,0,6,0,17,4,1,0,1,27,33,6,0,1,7,0,6,5,0,0,2,1,0,0,9,5,0,1,10,0,0,3,12,7,0,0,1,8,14,5,18,32,8,17,0,1,1,1,0,9,0,2,10,83,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1216290703650706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12515994330506736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09271475037044866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739543791316323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3341350078647157,0.0,0.0,0.13099785845796588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10045628380505467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13669177834409618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4614180840730111,0.10865558512895523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08643820790391457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1351876392405061,0.0,0.0,0.16717315592510518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.165249969409373,0.0,0.0,0.3715258653522664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1293044052070293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180617973363764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10544244211362568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15017392497370335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1211987814180934,0.1384601570791872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15220328174891345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031323733663245,0.0,0.14943103423422158,0.0,0.17737381789832266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1675094384156418,0.0,0.08970865251058198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16629030245328602,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Porygon_Z,2020/04/18,"What happened to me today? Did I snap? I've been struggling with depression my entire adult life. Lately my boss has been miserable, and has been taking it out on me in passive aggressive ways, tearing me down for the slightest mistakes, purposefully saying things ""under breath"" loud enough for me to hear, then pretending it wasn't bait. This has been grinding away at me and making me bitter. I get depressive episodes more often than ever lately, and I've been having half-assed suicidal thoughts (note: No, I'm not going to commit suicide).

Today, during one of these episodes, I had a common nihilistic thought that NORMALLY makes me even sadder. 

""None of this bullshit matters anyway, in 100 years literally no-one will remember either my boss or me, and no one will ever look back at what a painfully average person I am, and even those who do after my death won't matter because I won't exist to experience their judgement."" 

But this time, instead of sadness, this unnatural feeling of joy and catharsis filled me, coupled with a temporary lack of care for literally anyone else around me. It's like I became a pure nihilistic sociopath for a short time, and what scares me is that it felt like the 'rightest' thing I'd felt in a long time. I knew it was wrong fundamentally, but my body kept sending chemicals into my brain telling me it was right. When I said ""this is wrong"" I was struggling not to smile and it was just empty words. Suddenly all of the employees and my boss were just annoying noises and colors, which is very fucked up because I've known my boss for many years and am extremely close with them. I continued my job like normal, wondering if this would pass, and not wanting to make a mistake that would cost me once my inhibitions came back.

The feeling passed, but it was like I was high or something, I've never felt that way before, and in retrospect it scares me. What happened to induce this weird nihilistic catharsis?",8.315487060191916,7.887400790055254,7.812902006397209,72.9827667926723,61.81767955801104,10.71497528351265,36.17970340215179,10.064110947511567,3.5897160220994486,1554,62,270,28,19,490,202,362,0.18899999999999997,0.7559999999999999,0.055,-0.9929,2,0,1,0,0,2,49.0,0,0,2,0,13,24,4,5,11,0,31,6,3,8,6,71,57,21,3,9,12,0,5,4,0,6,2,4,0,2,30,21,0,1,12,1,1,6,10,18,0,2,24,12,37,6,37,27,6,47,0,4,2,1,10,18,1,5,25,192,67,5,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06672413612112822,0.09777529914296207,0.0,0.08494944552797642,0.0,0.0,0.08965594637509,0.14675353531806476,0.0,0.11634170917809265,0.0,0.0812005683166287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10599686613405733,0.0,0.106527068120965,0.0,0.1091420173506643,0.09729325160937392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10558714599721067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1643806912144508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971624768303974,0.0,0.0,0.0986006529170878,0.0,0.1260560559011626,0.17263671095169936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09334502017239896,0.0,0.0,0.09650058976995546,0.0,0.27487201396123456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0882198762175155,0.049856189891270296,0.0,0.05423284216185543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16876994039984394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755213109183187,0.0,0.0,0.10082289612722126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469566306247452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21528955657229096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06740226462925744,0.18648145632166646,0.0,0.0,0.08444908072390701,0.08013387619168116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19109295453987868,0.0967470706208666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07359847817401999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18699460126624184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10162566420822022,0.1293263672081973,0.0,0.10154008053460764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08332237507057333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809915003122277,0.08149335363001575,0.09077205745017003,0.07588665146126068,0.1910763129408657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07346366092276678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995201227116452,0.0,0.2087612934212664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0717485386231046,0.0,0.08340660276759823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12679369889450615,0.0,0.0,0.1515153016840045,0.16693114948227267,0.0,0.18090553793690248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07873651244517366,0.05628477625967528,0.1514895662074709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10348551659635062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13557590315526152,0.20866688342315431,0.0,0.12290253779205496
mentalhealth,Tuffstuff89,2020/04/18,"Why do I feel like this I can say there are some days where I’m happy, but for the most part I feel empty and depressed . I feel like I’m behind in life wasting time while my peers are pursuing dreams. Ever since I was a kid I’ve felt like others lives are more important than mine. I don’t know if any of you guys can relate, but I just wanted to get this off my chest",3.358518518518516,3.206366827160494,4.421827160493827,92.21422222222222,72.08641975308642,7.467654320987655,21.138271604938268,6.742157984588678,0.12598567901234548,287,4,70,2,5,94,60,81,0.121,0.687,0.192,0.6362,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,1,0,0,4,5,0,0,2,0,8,2,1,0,1,14,17,5,0,2,4,0,4,3,0,0,1,1,0,2,3,1,0,0,5,1,0,0,1,1,0,0,2,5,11,4,7,15,4,7,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,3,7,44,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16114012812076636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15281884039172433,0.0,0.2040922905979667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21434282529853468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35944050845687503,0.3385668669132713,0.2275176341623467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12380120706661235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23462649348400594,0.0,0.2522470777238154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1302263743883785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1673710273152342,0.34729834106623864,0.0,0.20923898565307372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2566033183253155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1884391701739806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1960147904765606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13817259767872928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13976445563968196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.213818484907533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RobotWizard55,2020/04/18,I hate my brain. Like literally I can't pay attention or do anything for more than an hour unless I'm doing something else and it makes me so pissed off at myself cause I just want to do something for more than an hour but I get bored and I'm switching between things so often and then my brain will make it seem like the thing I just stopped doing wasn't actually boring so I do it again and then I just rinse and repeat. It makes me so annoyed and just mad at myself .,0.7681818181818159,3.00570602020202,2.3422222222222224,94.30000000000004,84.75757575757575,4.8121212121212125,19.1010101010101,6.1124844417494595,-0.18222020202020195,372,10,82,3,11,121,58,99,0.183,0.726,0.092,-0.9125,0,0,2,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,10,8,4,0,3,0,8,3,3,4,0,22,17,15,0,1,7,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,6,0,0,1,0,13,2,10,15,2,10,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,3,9,62,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.1972693631442661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16635232995978974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4513327928964319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20766386492705066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16887049151280129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10561509775736257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1995813988375675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3981543094974602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19752068180802498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4048103378635118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1840298831118816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112500873770263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16900655759732786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2685991234582018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11923338225165413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FinchZiver,2020/04/18,"why have i never had good therapist? kinda weird, but the first time i went to a therapist, i believe i was 8, and she was also my brother's therapist, but for some reason neither of us liked her at all.

the second therapist i had was the school counselor who told my parents everything, even if i said specifically not to tell them.

the third therapist was fine at first, but as i got more comfortable around her she started saying that the panic attacks i was constantly having weren't really anxiety and that i was faking it? she also wouldn't let me have a session without my parents at a certain point, even though i thoroughly stated it made me uncomfortable, and would try to explain to my mom about how i was feeling and what my thoughts were, even though they weren't my thoughts/ feelings, and when i tried to say that, she started saying how it was making my mom upset? 

the fourth therapist i had was from my old school. she didnt work for the school, she was just the only person in the area who would drive there. i hated her ever since she started being my therapist because she had an annoying voice and would treat me like i was a baby, and then keep giving me the same advice for everything, every single time, even after i tried to tell her i tried it and it didn't work. and she would push me to talk about things i didn't want to, to the point where i would have panic attacks.

the fifth therapist i've had is the one i have currently, and is like a school counselor. i'm fine talking to her, but whenever i do i kind of shut off my emotions, and one time my braces broke, and instead of listening to me when i was just trying to say ""hey my braces broke"" and not asking for help. she then proceeded to tell me it would hurt my teeth (it didn't, i could've been able to fix it on my own) and that i needed to go to the school nurses. she was talking over me the entire time as i was trying to explain that i had it under control, and it had happened before, so i shut down. and instead of trying to help or care about what was going on, she said i was wasting her time, and she had better things to do than deal with me. she then forced me to go to the nurse, which made me miss class the next day and got me behind on work.

i don't know why this keeps happening, and my parents keep saying its because i don't like when people know too much about me or that i just have a negative view that affects my experience. 

i guess what i'm trying to ask is how can i find a good therapist?",8.795563025210086,5.554912427450984,8.642997198879552,76.35205882352942,62.96078431372549,11.753501400560223,35.65826330532213,9.48565724429506,3.0118263305322124,1958,58,411,26,21,638,207,510,0.14800000000000002,0.777,0.075,-0.9916,4,0,0,0,0,0,49.0,1,0,2,7,30,27,4,3,25,0,55,1,1,9,4,72,95,42,0,10,13,6,2,4,0,7,0,9,0,1,27,21,0,4,10,0,0,6,15,13,0,6,42,12,86,14,54,44,8,50,0,4,1,0,56,18,0,6,29,318,113,10,0.0525200472745191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051321982352475384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08400052566092496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04017769241131616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04675397697095652,0.0981983090328744,0.11949827162993346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403146669018449,0.0,0.044690691946352425,0.059172108259557286,0.0,0.04644971381794113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05354768847403571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05675551301513751,0.0589056988886382,0.04193298415356152,0.0,0.0,0.033871085616959784,0.05414586259249223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059077984178729885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13875598358582847,0.047507389589254316,0.04425040499984727,0.0,0.09440326395628004,0.05137468404142242,0.0,0.0,0.05311142790569896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048002371728029805,0.08934705076365472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05038201502428071,0.08954505957322083,0.08810264771420241,0.08401015920611732,0.0,0.0578567532353683,0.0,0.09288660870947503,0.0,0.0,0.05185267342461599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0704061612260549,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05622379685282722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14004669350399596,0.0,0.054691547233789765,0.05772728892836036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05370530668026576,0.0,0.10263456883308653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09939147722553444,0.035057539380592265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12302168921705328,0.0,0.0,0.038608277780862434,0.0389429495749533,0.040506698216321434,0.0,0.05585566610339674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055110954791716515,0.0,0.071177886525442,0.03994386259624176,0.0,0.12324191880061175,0.17495189150940013,0.0,0.0,0.03641078788948724,0.045858479487450345,0.0,0.0,0.09929684130784906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033645687136727435,0.05399935579972709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09991718385575404,0.20883024796520425,0.0,0.2657654587665865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04344512583267551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1115218793403133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266408737256788,0.13771450869815574,0.0,0.0,0.5488184058120605,0.06978397141184202,0.0,0.1032013595767402,0.08339010197951817,0.15312430960402118,0.0,0.0,0.050185155867983236,0.0,0.2852613167436168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06317515024838634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03097768463001508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048686609999316906,0.09478234738893973,0.0,0.0,0.05062745139037884,0.0,0.11470565977978202,0.0,0.0,0.22385240826028224,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,kdfgjlskdfj,2020/04/18,"I'm afraid that I might be a danger to myself The title is a little bit of a lie. I know I am. I don't know what to do about it anymore

none of my friends are able to help me anymore. I've thought about admitting myself to a hospital or something similar but i'm afraid that something's gonna go wrong. I don't know what do do with myself anymore and I have a bad feeling that if I don't do something things aren't gonna go well for me very soon.

I come seeking advice. I don't have any friends to talk to anymore, I don't have a good enough relationship with my parents to feel comfortable talking to them about it, and I don't have anyone else in my family within a 2,500 mile radius. I feel like I'm out of options.",1.5884615384615373,2.946718458598728,3.5505732484076447,91.11705046545816,77.78980891719746,6.3594316511513975,24.81577658010779,7.010146845296331,0.8491659970602647,566,20,129,6,13,192,80,157,0.14800000000000002,0.775,0.077,-0.8817,1,0,3,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,5,11,1,2,8,0,20,0,0,0,0,19,36,5,0,1,3,1,3,1,2,3,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,0,8,0,0,3,8,5,1,0,1,3,21,6,20,31,3,9,0,0,0,0,9,5,0,4,2,86,29,0,0.13898484434162842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13581438134049933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945144601456988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5513424769806088,0.09718143472225807,0.14240639749702555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604653962443325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1517354532619697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11972313684115575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11610400330173196,0.0,0.0,0.1436084971956617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102254191090426,0.0,0.2108247399793333,0.09929080056814436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2147586919430582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15797657989268435,0.11657389334248144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09315861148741164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22914730704740705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06790097454966205,0.13929932665901806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14744095625364018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1543262218939684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14921770919692134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3209919700779744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234215064589347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09233535485526004,0.0,0.0,0.11033844164948893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467705225225062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12496406647191632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15195810908118373,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LovelyLionLily,2020/04/18,What are some ways to recover from trauma? How can someone recover from trauma/PTSD (self-diagnosed)? Can't see a psychologist right now so I need things I can do by myself. Thanks.,1.779705882352939,4.578086970588238,3.3737647058823548,82.98594117647062,91.05882352941177,7.425882352941178,21.50588235294117,8.238735603445708,1.9451952941176471,143,5,26,4,5,47,29,34,0.087,0.8109999999999999,0.102,0.1179,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,3,8,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,1,4,8,1,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,1,1,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580448919117682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2615677404334042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4123586191801635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3012558844878305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811047683094981,0.0,0.3680065570744401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988931691320527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.324774845399826,0.0,0.0,0.23435866979635014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2800051858566554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HarveysLim,2020/04/18,"Need advice, I hate taking my medication... I can't understand why, I just hate taking them.. I have about 4 different medications to take in the morning and at night but I always forget.. 

I think about this a lot, but I can't find 1n explanation why I hate them so much. Maybe it's because I don't feel' normal' having to take them to basically live. 

Generally, I take them everyday for two month then suddenly stop them and let the situation become worse until I just can take it anymore and begin to take them again. 
I've done this like 10 times... But this time I don't want to. I want to really be better. 

I've you got any suggestions on how to remind myself about them or why I seems to really hate them?",2.742529137529136,4.454512384615388,4.8183391608391615,81.74238053613054,75.5034965034965,8.403030303030304,21.706876456876454,9.075114841892004,1.5394946386946389,553,14,114,13,12,191,85,143,0.171,0.772,0.057,-0.9364,1,0,0,0,0,1,20.0,0,1,8,1,8,6,4,0,3,0,10,2,0,1,0,23,30,11,0,4,6,0,1,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,5,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,4,4,0,1,2,1,25,2,16,26,2,14,0,0,0,0,10,3,0,3,12,75,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787571827329936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0918566337041812,0.0,0.0,0.07507169104476884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948116306208792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729514473794808,0.12192147619141705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09763450303392103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153382115162316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11297136811755228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055818512567368576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10089809651971428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08829214939879489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4359647958767109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11288532257838745,0.0,0.053932921747349344,0.0,0.09747990564892736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09385301291211592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11090558950124632,0.0,0.0,0.22242063888468144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08811542052897617,0.0,0.08115227639301653,0.0818557363631598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359727065869544,0.10816266020437827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14144241902994692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1004985320442905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408745731566358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0922943092566344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5810177326501037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073600399783432,0.0,0.0,0.1287432334175232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10783887625699247,0.11492402501506828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13022645762027713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988401851078759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250089545371512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,givon92,2020/04/18,What does it mean when my clinical Psychologist is also a Consultant Psychologist? Is this good? Just noticed on my next appointment letter Confused,6.708750000000002,10.635022375000002,7.196666666666669,57.715,75.25,11.533333333333333,37.16666666666667,10.504223727775694,6.233016666666668,123,7,15,5,3,40,21,24,0.085,0.777,0.138,0.3474,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,1,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,1,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,2,12,5,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3342937747527457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3658157649339973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506188376603521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4553508650715243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4445734432283284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4759232839646969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,lishan206,2020/04/18,"My (24M) mental health discovery I have gone to several doctors to try and figure out what is wrong/going on in my head. I started by going to a psychologist and after 2 sections he told me to talk to my family doctor about ADHD. So I got to my doctor and she said it may be depression but could be ADHD. Recommended I get another opinion. She said that she could give me a prescription for depression and/or ADHD but I told her no because I didn't want to dilute the pool. So she sends me to the hospital for a 3rd opinion. The guy at the hospital told me to go to counseling for anger issues. Now I have a appointment on Tuesday for counseling. I have looked into depression, anxiety and not likely but could still be bipolar (as several family members have it).

My problems have been restlessness, excessive fidgeting, always on the edge of emotions (mostly anger/frustration), constantly being bored, lack of energy, sort attention span, emotional highs and lows but mostly lows, always stressed.

It has caused problems in the relationship with my GF. She blames herself for the stress I have and it could possibly be but I always tell her it's not her at all.

I am looking forward to figuring all this out but it's still going to be a while I feel.",4.171386554621846,6.2451894579831935,5.660243697478991,75.67666806722693,72.48739495798321,9.633949579831931,29.54705882352941,10.008157457239328,3.3843438655462186,993,42,173,29,20,335,129,238,0.212,0.762,0.027000000000000003,-0.9933,0,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,0,0,6,13,1,3,12,0,22,6,1,1,2,39,39,16,0,8,8,0,1,1,1,1,5,2,0,1,9,10,0,0,4,1,0,6,4,12,0,0,9,5,31,1,34,19,6,29,0,5,2,0,22,16,0,6,10,135,40,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3439599982719919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23814355318577626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1000361532238563,0.0729814211139027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0581554981706838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980029952779749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1030944722630885,0.0,0.304679397088692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24650594498102404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2929405657603008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21462632536327514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17987094068039014,0.0,0.04823755737717244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0498430284461559,0.0915172284513378,0.21687410132899504,0.0,0.07630080822089216,0.0,0.0,0.09446188180259656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09790883815900664,0.10140668685134366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079628007379746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09957374512387276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04660805685508722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16022544359018734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09614166041917788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10755017127276634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18257153858805228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024248550210329,0.0,0.0,0.1814961893988263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2155517059309104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06752524225156735,0.0,0.15237455087385804,0.0,0.2185627984936888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0766796231184512,0.08338458440985973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2734789213307247,0.0,0.06477094326262442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056269917743708986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1043058989155938,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,laurenp97,2020/04/18,"Anyone else? So is anybody else here tired of fighting it? Thinking it’s gone “hey I’m having a good day” then something in the slightest will set you off and you’re flooded with the hopelessness once again that nothing will ever last long enough for it to get any better. This is a dangerous place to be but personally, I’m waiting for the last straw until I physically can’t deal with it anymore I’ll end it. I’m tired, I have zero motivation to try to find something to live for. So... Anyone else?",2.2216000000000022,4.524677960000002,3.649999999999999,86.705,79.4,6.0,25.0,7.1686216300943375,1.1593999999999998,396,15,78,5,10,130,69,100,0.126,0.804,0.07,-0.6898,0,0,2,0,2,1,11.0,0,1,0,2,5,5,2,0,5,0,8,2,0,1,1,9,15,6,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,7,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,3,0,1,1,0,3,2,14,11,1,14,0,1,0,0,5,3,0,0,9,47,10,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11137556265340544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242508948836235,0.2290366353459885,0.3356225623513234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448495106271661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10562412064059812,0.16884930076746635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4104498509786511,0.0,0.14505987673145762,0.1692278319351402,0.0,0.0,0.14814778321668964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1496913432233634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556794173504056,0.0,0.0,0.1373703340388577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26700403141666834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1446201515905068,0.14493955584492613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15715068713940303,0.0,0.0,0.17441964443569358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1430057962875421,0.1711145443013557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521706641117704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10494318344866048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3764805006756497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11119541633003062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ironhead_33,2020/04/18,"My [30M] Live in Girlfriend [26F] has been sleeping...A LOT and I’m worried about her.. Backstory : My GF is 26 and wonderful, we actually have a great relationship, never really argue and certainly never fight or anything like that. She lost her mom back when she was in college (before we met) and that made a pretty significant and understandable dent in her mental health I think. Then before she and I hooked up she was dating a guy who put his hands on her a lot which (I think) has caused her to completely freak out and cower in fear from ME in situations where things are otherwise normal 

example : once we took a day trip up to the top of a mountain and her cars radiator busted on the way up, I pulled off and made a phone call to get a tow, she got out of the car and sat down beside it, as I’m hanging up the phone I’m walking towards her to tell her “tow trucks 20 min out love” and she completely freaked out and screamed like I was going to kick her in the face or something. I comforted her and told her everything was ok of course but later I asked her ya know “what the f*ck babe?” She said she has no idea what happened, I looked like a “dark figure” and her ear started to hurt really bad. This sort of thing has happened about bi monthly since we’ve been together. Thankfully never in a crowded place where people would CERTAINLY think I actively beat the shit out of her. 

Throughout our relationship she has had bouts with panic attacks, and maybe unrelated but worth mentioning she has chronic sinusitis and uses Affrin nasal spray sometimes 10-12x per day. She even wakes up in the middle of the night to take a hit of Affrin and then go back to sleep... that concerns me also. But may be for a different post. 

When she moved in with me that meant giving up her career at one of the bigger gyms in America, to move to a different state to be with me. She came here and her panic and anxiety seemed to vanish, she stopped having daily panic attacks and was happy and full of life, she found a job at another gym here in town and was eager and climbed from the ground up to a salaried position with a title in under 90 days, but now in the midst of covid 19 shut down she is the only employee still working. The gym has been shut down for weeks but they still make her go there everyday to take phone calls and do things that are arbitrary and pedantic imo. She is there from 8am - 5pm 6 days a week even though the gym is closed. I stop by sometimes as I’m an outdoor contractor and she’s just sitting in a gym that the owners won’t let her turn the lights or AC on inside, so it’s DARK and pretty uncomfortable in there. Anyway to get to the point here, she works from 8-5 then comes home and is asleep before 8pm every night. Then she sleeps all through the night until 7am then goes to work and sits in that box with the lights out for no reason... and I truthfully think it’s causing her to be seriously depressed. When she is home and is awake, she’s cold or doesn’t feel good, tired, complains of her chest hurting again... is working at gyms bad for my girlfriend? 

Upon her request, I had a talk with her gyms owner two days ago and asked him if they could forward the gyms calls to her cellphone and let her work from home since she has a work laptop with access to their intranet system. And he quickly declined stating “somebody has to be here to accept deliveries” although deliveries have not come since the shutdown, so that’s just not true. So I told him that and he said “somebody has got to be here” I said OKAY well how about since you gave 29 other employees temporary unemployment, you give it to her too? And he agreed. Next thing I know she’s calling me up saying she’s bombarded with emails from the owners with a laundry list of busy work tasks,  along with the “but if you want to be furloughed I guess that’s what we’ll do” basically guilt tripping her into being the only employee at work... sigh 

I genuinely think this is causing her to fall into a depression because all she does is go to work and sleep and not feel good when she’s awake. Meanwhile I have two careers and am building her dream car (old mustang) for her in my spare time, trying to spend any time with her is cut very short by her falling asleep the second she sits down at home. 

I’ve talked to her about everything I’ve mentioned here a few times and her answers are always “I don’t know what’s going on” but damnit somethings going on. Something is causing her to feel like garbage and be so tired and I want to try to help any way I can. I don’t expect her to be like me and be able to run off 5hr sleep every night and go full throttle everyday, but 11-13hr of sleep everyday is not only unusual for her, but seems unhealthy to me. Any advice on how I can help her would be appreciated. Thank you. 

[[TL:DR - My GF has had bouts of anxiety throughout our relationship, has a job that I think is causing her to be depressed because she is constantly sleeping when she’s home and sleeps for a long time. Basically work - sleep - repeat - talked to her about it, her response “I don’t know what’s going on” any advice on how I can help or what I can do for her appreciated. Thank you.]]",5.5773366572524035,5.545767846968243,5.941911043089982,82.79927184083057,67.35418671799808,9.0460310197384,29.544817684090944,8.699597902813167,2.0164334590321698,4079,130,845,58,61,1311,420,1039,0.111,0.782,0.107,-0.9332,10,0,3,0,1,0,100.0,6,6,3,14,44,48,6,5,52,2,78,25,17,13,9,153,149,84,0,9,22,1,4,5,4,5,6,6,5,2,31,72,0,2,24,9,2,28,14,24,2,4,29,15,128,23,143,99,7,159,0,6,1,2,142,71,1,15,58,557,159,17,0.043007041493921365,0.0,0.04196866865774807,0.0,0.0,0.08405196640613337,0.03812314738796434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03439271554467278,0.0357853037452049,0.0,0.0,0.11698505196063795,0.04509663285940303,0.06580053805480147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035391130712076425,0.0,0.08041155654592681,0.09785343679486416,0.0,0.0661395204851657,0.07181816648420206,0.05243338663553445,0.0,0.10978747407914063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1756599913631817,0.04918859826246375,0.0,0.22090039224532426,0.0,0.07409351628662167,0.0901841295263418,0.04647533332352969,0.0,0.03433762311807972,0.0,0.0,0.138679919399034,0.0,0.11112570545963772,0.0,0.0,0.08986640955794492,0.0,0.0,0.03763575183066886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05681149059533321,0.0,0.07247057467423736,0.0,0.07730391156938501,0.0,0.0,0.048394878349918534,0.06523695718901243,0.030724239036470632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04715500117702656,0.0,0.0,0.0449388082607926,0.0825125460901044,0.1955351422292453,0.07214453189967608,0.06879331970139606,0.0474154150752423,0.047377104862284934,0.0425837326364138,0.07606196952027795,0.04578179538296634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045714474008112085,0.0,0.0,0.08648014009154523,0.0,0.21569784599114689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09207985482406386,0.04854971501155478,0.0,0.0,0.08535570517470074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454218109503076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08795522748748744,0.030377145276476194,0.1050553405217707,0.0,0.037976005564658466,0.03805987836944953,0.03611508325471338,0.0,0.04694726614785698,0.07312609746354833,0.038815534055269885,0.08138860505661719,0.028707534152342756,0.0,0.04320635371991051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04334098246175973,0.0,0.0,0.05036932721285857,0.034327810209338686,0.0914193578514531,0.0,0.0,0.09950904510036183,0.0,0.045738476533033465,0.16143678026062344,0.04213776940452888,0.0,0.0,0.04512865548479609,0.045801095593032484,0.029142684347263283,0.09812637908291706,0.0,0.15137849042511914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02981566748035425,0.0,0.04493320477897246,0.0,0.04065555531605422,0.0,0.04118885750687093,0.08750724501965497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04323395532595775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05510282407848356,0.044218401468397193,0.0,0.13852040288549125,0.0,0.0,0.1227286349223739,0.03420092557221584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07830399068910014,0.0,0.0,0.04414611006571738,0.1423034765851032,0.048341716563569684,0.34430480531959146,0.0,0.0,0.09932676502789156,0.0850701274493835,0.0,0.0304406053254253,0.0,0.06869095778301172,0.07191162483351925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06467188582215218,0.10370229262510873,0.03759004987777345,0.11878531688805136,0.0,0.0,0.11428786948467926,0.16534305384648387,0.042254199909101314,0.0,0.1003110069942868,0.09886053521176356,0.0,0.08219014234743104,0.04778240553402389,0.058397916236051714,0.046779311362535145,0.08402326074403882,0.04477184691995245,0.0,0.0371442754517817,0.0,0.03548531329423472,0.05073333469427526,0.06827397544973854,0.0689953090833421,0.0,0.038668495241082505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046639301942593546,0.31309638418966823,0.04367573824855039,0.0,0.06110193668996041,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Sorxleva,2020/04/18,"Sometimes I feel nothing. Sometimes when I get really really upset on the verge of another breakdown I stop feeling all emotions. I hate it. It’s like I can’t do anything, I can’t even think straight. I just shut down.
I’m going through it right now and I just don’t understand.",1.157678571428573,3.70519798214286,2.9121428571428574,88.43285714285715,87.03571428571428,6.057142857142857,27.642857142857146,7.447530270364453,1.8815285714285717,221,11,43,4,7,73,39,56,0.175,0.7120000000000001,0.114,-0.6335,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,5,3,1,1,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,9,12,2,0,0,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,1,4,0,0,1,3,2,0,0,0,2,8,1,4,12,1,10,0,0,0,0,0,6,0,0,4,27,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26457288588157984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20763265444448575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2838189217474772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16665080145675995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2551547485956963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13182348033283153,0.0,0.14339567499458492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2491075155268605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12326771582158826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2421017742784932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3232771996996139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154744982103796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4990893486830302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21094552857143764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16167241374399136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2626674320184921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hamodx11,2020/04/18,"How to get rid of Brain Fogginess(Latest Brain Fog Research) 2020  Brain fog is actually a symptom not a disease and is defined as the inability to have a sharp memory or to lack a sharp focus. You just really feel like you're not yourself and you're unable to think clearly this is called mental fogginess or what we call subsyndromal delirium or for short SSD. 

watch video here: [https://youtu.be/GCRs39yaAvE](https://youtu.be/GCRs39yaAvE)",9.647083333333336,11.952101763888896,7.234333333333333,68.844,59.13888888888889,10.76,32.455555555555556,10.793553405168565,3.8407355555555562,365,13,54,9,5,105,53,72,0.069,0.855,0.076,0.1226,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,5,0,4,4,3,1,1,14,7,7,0,1,6,0,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,4,2,1,7,7,1,1,0,0,1,0,4,1,0,3,1,31,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.2153557751594966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.739069072256521,0.4506861286573667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11158447427418354,0.1576567121497971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11529829510043682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10781506784125264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22239759260276806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14137583788601338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293752012447406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14140541292333092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JustJosh904,2020/04/18,Not doing too well and don’t have the proper support I wish I had someone to go to but this will do. My mental health hasn’t been doing very good and I’ve been thinking I need to talk to someone or at least do something. But I don’t know what to do. Anytime I’ve tried to talk to my mother (single parent) about how I’m feeling she just assumes when I say I don’t feel good I’m depressed and or want to kill myself. I’m turning 18 in a week or so and I’m just lost. Any advice is appreciated.,0.5549999999999997,2.088921772727275,2.9672727272727286,93.38090909090911,81.27272727272728,4.763636363636363,21.0,4.935628992294339,-0.2383454545454544,385,11,90,1,10,133,67,110,0.131,0.6990000000000001,0.17,0.3761,1,0,1,0,1,1,8.0,0,0,0,1,8,7,1,0,2,0,15,1,0,1,0,21,30,12,1,3,8,2,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,2,4,0,0,5,0,0,1,5,3,1,0,4,3,10,4,11,25,2,5,0,2,0,0,6,2,0,4,2,59,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887924876560554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13138240497256296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166402598085464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19537512266025164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10979982832069132,0.32409344434153764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2053622214661188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2137468168951778,0.0,0.10617748947785294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21090026905207712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19469983264581908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14325511194064675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21452537687357973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15364013704852625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3273949175181902,0.14873454968588548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21924070312775007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3105731630474079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1237945515020058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13116989823726047,0.2101457691137548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15940996644152772,0.11395417470352685,0.0,0.1549731266904909,0.0,0.17370971132800514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221700930322525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FlacoPicasso,2020/04/18,Anger Hope everyone’s holding up well. I need some advice on how to deal with stored up anger. I’ve been working diligently on bettering my mental health over the Past year and a half but I think there’s an underlying layer of anger that I need to let loose before I can truly move forward. I’ve been pretty active in the gym on and off for a good 7 years and it helps temporarily but not completely. And I find myself overcompensating by trying to be too nice and too kind even when I  really want to tell people to fuck off. So I probably come across as fake or at least not sincere because I can’t express that later deep down. How can I get this off my shoulders without just lashing out because I feel like I’m almost at that point.,5.403281133482476,5.576290073825502,6.151230425055933,80.44856077554067,67.7248322147651,9.038329604772557,28.636092468307233,8.841846274778883,2.0390620432513056,587,18,118,9,9,193,106,149,0.142,0.65,0.20800000000000002,0.8861,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,2,10,13,4,0,5,0,7,3,1,2,0,27,17,13,0,4,7,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,8,0,1,3,1,1,3,4,5,1,1,2,1,13,8,27,13,2,26,0,0,0,1,4,19,1,4,7,80,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17083724640737435,0.0,0.0,0.17506227075568154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2131437437012606,0.0,0.14876344213907444,0.0,0.0,0.15461875869424382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1505965040470811,0.18330098648116772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18023719360885665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1154704527757122,0.0,0.0,0.16705305301983572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08839691765857675,0.12489521945484405,0.0,0.0,0.15978714443878594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16162316007476873,0.09133899643712036,0.0,0.0,0.1466351556076179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1858311041236382,0.0,0.0,0.11718170423899,0.0,0.0,0.1736409562291828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820536328275489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.178770700003517,0.0,0.08541080411329305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17618276923065634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18581161192836734,0.0,0.2592614691566124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16689051765397453,0.12120184095466753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16526640406715276,0.0,0.0,0.17786016697834686,0.1884912275826495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11199755505245593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15280500595084398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1120209843167466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11869489355537045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10311648341877752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15718892804442813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16852533732532946,0.0,0.1272748905757074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22516350499273044
mentalhealth,Celesschere,2020/04/18,"pls give me coping mechanisms TW
I wanna rip out my hair i hate the feeling of it on my skin i cant cut it bc my mom will literally disown me so thats out of the question my skin feels like it shouldn’t be on my body and it hurts i wanna rip myself out of my body how do i make it stop pls pls pls i cant do this anymore",-2.760129870129873,-1.0898563636363612,0.9322077922077908,100.84688311688316,99.64935064935064,3.8389610389610387,13.493506493506494,5.565023196281405,-1.2051194805194805,248,5,67,2,11,90,46,77,0.11699999999999999,0.74,0.14300000000000002,-0.4563,0,0,0,0,0,0,0.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,2,0,7,5,5,2,0,13,12,3,0,3,0,1,5,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,7,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,5,15,1,10,9,0,6,0,1,0,0,3,5,0,1,2,44,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2604176957609887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5833542923599975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2655457435240494,0.18759361067788316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2518992647611888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25925224120686663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2811069204454037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282877055218834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528017468240767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30754102479347595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941597396388643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21953613458448812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NeeNawNeeNawNeeNaww,2020/04/18,"I hate my friends I am my friend groups verbal punching bag. I hate it but I’m more scared of being alone. I literally haven’t been able to sleep because overthinking everything they say, I didn’t know where else to put this.",1.91,4.431124444444446,2.6044444444444466,92.42000000000004,82.33333333333334,6.266666666666668,22.333333333333336,7.554174236665415,0.8877999999999999,180,6,38,3,5,56,36,45,0.24600000000000002,0.665,0.08900000000000001,-0.8095,0,1,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,1,5,2,1,0,0,5,1,1,0,0,2,9,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,2,1,8,2,3,6,1,2,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,21,10,0,0.26551015002552497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27498844175481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161852523079445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217996608280097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2386234026496376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4102649665666331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.524272608828127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14591743476373453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669110351711672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2111443280973957,0.2658219787957196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2657018982805257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hufflepuff_puff,2020/04/18,"Live in a mental health facility? I’m trying to find out if it’s possible to basically live as full time patient in a mental health facility. I’m at the point with my mental illnesses where’d I’d like to throw in the towel and give up. I have no intention of harming myself so suicide is out of the question, therefore, I’d like to waste away in a hospital on my own terms. I feel burnt out and hollow, I have nothing to offer anyone, no life plan or even hopes of what one might be. Is this something I can realistically do or am I seriously stuck being a cog in a shit world?",3.8895000000000017,4.472146949999999,6.190000000000001,77.40000000000002,71.16666666666666,9.0,28.333333333333336,9.188382445141503,2.252083333333334,454,16,94,9,8,162,79,120,0.21,0.7290000000000001,0.062,-0.9562,1,0,1,0,0,1,10.0,0,0,0,1,2,6,1,0,8,0,10,5,1,2,0,16,16,7,1,2,3,0,1,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,3,0,1,1,1,8,3,22,12,3,18,0,0,0,0,3,15,1,6,4,63,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12245149919703872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16453573899599325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156684366804064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885484816864322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600611130776496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16799589506891688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37229945468952425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17393867840574573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369599417735486,0.1711144963913925,0.0,0.3092772359253177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.529454548684889,0.1857799917021408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16803719816260154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11866925876419075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16554976736231142,0.1974271685619384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19618012303736007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17976333601928554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13481981093266182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19155836882879015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10211681861608804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1188984060378148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LTart123,2020/04/18,"I constantly feel watched I can’t do anything alone without thinking “I probably look so stupid right now”
“What would ______ think if they could see me now?”
“I bet _____ is making fun of me right now”

Is there a specific name for this?",1.5959090909090892,4.089143136363639,2.323818181818183,94.07572727272728,83.54545454545455,6.247272727272727,24.70909090909091,7.554174236665415,1.2293145454545449,174,7,37,3,5,54,36,44,0.14300000000000002,0.787,0.07,-0.5309,0,1,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,1,0,5,2,1,0,1,0,6,0,0,1,0,10,12,2,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,4,7,1,3,10,0,6,0,0,3,0,2,2,0,2,4,25,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2900267915760837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.230440960367132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026131188513361,0.0,0.2235812953372202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14159166212544635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235154805780626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1869223052989588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30191987363830475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4782884506781822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231477807339402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35886403694750924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699390799383797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1989253901729899,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Duhduhdeeznuts,2020/04/18,"Trust Do any of you guys feel like you could trust somebody else more than you trust yourself? I honestly feel like whether it’s family or friends I can trust them more than I could trust myself not to say that I’m am a bad person or anything but I am somewhat unpredictable and I have a hard time truly understanding where I come from sometimes, and what my motives are.",6.9221232876712335,6.580654602739724,6.237089041095892,82.85097602739727,64.6164383561644,9.491780821917807,33.31849315068493,8.841846274778883,2.5033863013698627,298,11,60,4,4,91,52,73,0.05,0.662,0.28800000000000003,0.9359999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,3,1,1,1,10,0,0,2,0,8,0,0,1,0,15,13,6,0,2,5,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,0,2,3,3,0,0,4,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,4,12,9,5,11,3,3,0,0,0,0,8,1,0,3,3,41,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16536773764039447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20011278775550825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203041457244807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2094742354991305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.388311836824824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031419988793541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22924430084348346,0.0,0.2459137662481329,0.34744937511458346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878768548774816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2407820626087032,0.0,0.0,0.21783756091708426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2376066165440953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123315423790667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19338298670800552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405068729946453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14179764003230466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2531543615546974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,yanoodles,2020/04/18,"I cant for the life of me reach out for help Its like it makes me sick or something i dont know , ive been trying too get online therapy but its really exspensive and i need too save my money right now , and i cant think of anything else too help me . im really fucking low and it just sucks right now , i just want too feel loved and happy but its like my mind wont let me.",-0.6147619047619024,1.1886194285714282,1.8166666666666664,98.66166666666668,86.85714285714286,5.161904761904762,15.285714285714285,6.42735559955562,-0.6931571428571424,288,5,73,3,9,98,52,84,0.091,0.626,0.28300000000000003,0.9565,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,8,8,2,0,1,0,7,4,0,1,0,18,17,7,0,2,5,0,1,2,0,1,2,0,0,0,5,5,0,0,3,0,1,0,4,3,0,0,1,1,12,5,5,14,0,6,0,1,0,2,3,4,2,1,4,44,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17731591505690747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2525327448979636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18000003808747336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894962030275823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19920131141099204,0.11257574635232448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293750094429379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2888540125930366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2327478095065107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11841832271991355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22033573570822024,0.1521949483709776,0.2105384423886339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19447279024301412,0.0,0.14382989706268773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21756630008775815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15977049523857215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2760750356688126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3680255201073563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16588163829187158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24641214796901656,0.0,0.0,0.1380663945137754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14629201930639044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12709155492076646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LivinVidas,2020/04/18,Need help right now I'm at odds with my alt and it's really tearing me apart I just need someone to talk to.,-2.2910000000000004,-0.5432753999999953,0.5355000000000025,102.35525000000004,103.0,4.1000000000000005,14.25,5.985473137389443,-0.8959999999999999,85,2,22,1,4,29,22,25,0.0,0.8859999999999999,0.114,0.4019,0,0,0,0,0,0,1.0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,3,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,4,3,0,4,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,11,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2952988111426093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6533409299193325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2822347146480981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3762367625855256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3732859808011956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.354106314959028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,VettoRyo,2020/04/18,"Just an old man tossing his words to a wall...   My mental state has not been good for a while I don't know why I'm reaching out to random strangers in order to seek clarity perhaps it's the anonymity so I feel not as judged as I would if I were to reach out to people I know.

I'm a 34 years old man will be 35 in two months I feel old disconnected worthless I feel like I am no longer at that point in my life in which things can change in which I can see new adventures I'm supposed to be at that point which everything is day to day and happy about it but I’m not.

I'm single don't have any kids work a job that I hate and it just feels like this is just the rest of my life like I can't start something new or I'm too old and people want someone young full of energy whereas I'm not out of energy but I don't have that spunk I used to. I see these younger people who are just starting their lives and all I can feel is envy and desire to be that age again to be in a position where if I were to screw up, I could rebound easier.

I also can't help but feel a bit jealous seeing a younger generation enjoy things without being ostracized like gaming as well as DnD and overall geek culture stuff that when I was their age generally made you an outcast from public is now considered the social norm and only thing going through my head is I had only been born a little bit later maybe I would have had a group to hang out with when I was younger. Part of me understands the only reason that's normal now is cause my generation grew up and made it the norm we didn't want people to go through the same pains we did from being shunned but at the same token I still can't help but feel jealous about it.

Throughout my entire life I've always been a late bloomer I didn't even have friends until I was 26 It feels like I'm behind age wise by a good ten years but I should be feeling now is something I’m not going to feel till I'm 44 And I don't know what to do about it I feel like I'm trapped torn between What I want to versus the knowledge to know I'm too old to be doing it that it is not my place to be there that it is not right for me to join such things.

It is always felt like I've been in a war with my emotions versus my brain I desire to be versus my desire to know as if I've never really fit sorry if this went on too long I just felt like maybe putting it out there somewhere would make me feel better.",4.059962049335862,3.668628772296018,5.101480075901328,88.76633776091083,70.57495256166983,7.938519924098673,25.728652751423148,7.1029339738359605,0.8890698292220107,1901,46,445,15,31,628,225,527,0.10300000000000001,0.754,0.14300000000000002,0.9421,1,1,2,0,0,0,12.0,2,1,2,2,26,25,5,0,22,0,59,7,2,6,2,91,108,32,1,16,27,0,14,8,1,5,4,0,0,3,35,18,0,0,22,1,0,7,19,8,1,2,19,17,50,17,66,73,9,69,0,1,3,1,18,27,1,6,41,294,85,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05472911827671231,0.11389028695309025,0.0,0.0,0.046539569818533834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06052704697880449,0.14943116027211806,0.0,0.0,0.07639842891700685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07030374602937749,0.07239736960247489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05464144971424458,0.0,0.0,0.08827252621603797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07698251786468271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04520205425811343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061506846036016236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4152462042577275,0.19556589069041255,0.13142068265094806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05287432802564551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11668313068087745,0.11480357269919035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07285255772200018,0.0,0.06756746042934936,0.07023620117363072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09174388123960238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06791325445108623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880561817141009,0.0,0.07720002143344963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14501742741881152,0.2674792526713106,0.06859194591735865,0.060431206646815915,0.06056467341676744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12951366363422195,0.045682290775079085,0.0,0.13750851630026173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06896849282801028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054625834435409484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05278290487440115,0.13219394110428548,0.0,0.0,0.06705382023881801,0.0,0.0,0.3590660819568479,0.0,0.0,0.15614847859044134,0.07282189176690261,0.0,0.0,0.07411070220769839,0.0,0.18978265207490266,0.0,0.07150219573984838,0.0,0.12939034677896474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0687981805778329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438425539916303,0.07036472943893224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05844490320001554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16360650681572084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976299748330916,0.05798652652633698,0.10537243493114637,0.0,0.07660972220857966,0.09688025286086904,0.0,0.054653950604220417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07834409766781415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18186625358198305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06685309523295001,0.07124542702556312,0.0,0.05910767475929134,0.0,0.0,0.12109791118915147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0615331652681753,0.06344187054020488,0.061753831419256826,0.0,0.0,0.06597091514348594,0.0,0.049823018540277764,0.0,0.0,0.14584724121438286,0.0,0.0,0.08814248775310235
mentalhealth,ShirtlessJeff,2020/04/18,"I slept for 12hrs straight after having a panic attack and throwing up twice. Like the title says, I'm so stresses right now I cant even fucking keep my food down. Thanks to this lockdown shit I havent been able to see my therapist, which means I cant continue my meds, which ive been off of for three weeks now.

Before this happened I felt like I finally had things under control, like I climbed out of a deep rutt in my life and was on my way to normal again.

Got myself a job, worked not even a week, and then got furloughed. Floridas unemployment website is a fucking mess and a majority of people have yet to even file for it because of it.

So now I'm just laying in my room for days at a time doing nothing but self loathing and sleeping. I hate this shit. I hate me.",4.471320754716982,4.748358930817613,5.1569119496855365,86.40970754716982,69.75471698113208,7.6178616352201285,29.10754716981132,7.1686216300943375,1.4519705660377356,606,21,129,5,10,196,102,159,0.171,0.7509999999999999,0.078,-0.9526,3,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,3,11,14,7,2,8,0,12,8,4,1,0,14,27,9,0,1,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,1,1,8,6,1,2,2,0,0,2,4,10,0,2,8,3,18,4,22,19,1,29,0,0,1,2,2,13,4,0,16,88,26,3,0.14122841684308246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1606677125552403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08609153207277008,0.0,0.12017498076905606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15839967838554972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910806453283706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2798401121038031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13560142774262846,0.15470882746111847,0.0,0.0,0.17077396223716154,0.0,0.0,0.2611267912940784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22590653282164044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12488782260032863,0.0,0.0,0.27886764604619035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14014741181454782,0.12553030594391473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09975380743675244,0.20699121223994416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15383914847122634,0.15687293344512165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383738628740974,0.13551247491240315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16570111780305405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09791000192294944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060829632503282,0.0,0.1123105055672065,0.0,0.0,0.11254076331916836,0.0,0.1473320395405658,0.0,0.28993788076508104,0.0,0.0,0.14133041031671634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1617766743327387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300241515929003,0.0,0.16397707713409593,0.09382588473315127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08235142559004457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121005436483336,0.22656983444947698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10281596948409057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TeenVital123,2020/04/18,"I think it is time I should say this. I often think about my life in third-person unintentionally (like from out of mind/body perspective).

This has led me to feel like I am not what I am supposed to be.

This has also led me to feel as if my personality has been lost and it is isolated/lost in my own brain.

Almost like I have lost control of my own personality thoughts but not my own emotions and not my own general thoughts and feelings.",4.297453183520602,5.063294494382023,5.57477528089888,81.51399812734084,70.34831460674158,8.629962546816481,28.316479400749067,8.841846274778883,1.902773782771536,346,12,75,6,6,116,51,89,0.04,0.9179999999999999,0.042,0.0516,0,0,0,0,0,0,10.0,0,0,0,3,3,5,0,0,0,0,11,2,1,3,0,23,20,7,0,2,5,0,3,3,0,1,1,1,0,2,6,4,0,1,7,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,5,4,14,3,11,13,4,6,0,2,0,0,3,3,0,3,4,56,20,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16725184047790664,0.0,0.0,0.13357017531263654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18552759855075868,0.0,0.18645561750986084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873332212045623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878811267377783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2533592265281028,0.11932299992765162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797500010739435,0.24480056364485275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5469839590020014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16864806980093716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4375204866766002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13282532513612152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21404630156169188,0.0,0.2651990675797452,0.0973938708954995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StevenStoneYT,2020/04/18,"A feeling when listening to certain music, not really nostalgia but a kind of ""good sadness""? There are a few songs that make me emotional in some kind of fond longing way. They don't make me feel nostalgic because they're not tied to any memories as far as I can remember.
Is there a word for this kind of feeling?",5.2359677419354815,5.904579532258066,6.251774193548387,77.84766129032263,68.19354838709678,10.716129032258065,34.854838709677416,10.686352973137794,3.879987096774194,249,12,48,7,4,83,47,62,0.018000000000000002,0.765,0.217,0.888,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,3,7,0,0,4,0,4,0,0,2,1,12,10,4,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,5,4,6,9,10,2,5,0,1,0,0,2,2,0,1,2,31,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15300969406595138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371596851646365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530979885037714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413046947106703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18872176520834374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7029177172576027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19912049438440196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30038237839246507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441426252861021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2548844346467491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1785968364530152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CorvidBorn,2020/04/18,"TW: feel like the only reason i havent killed myself is because of my fear of comitment just what it says on the tin
i know people care about me but i dont care. my parents are abusive and deny it and breaking their hearts would be nice. cps didnt care and i want to show them that they need to try harder. my friends care, and i love them, but theyre tearing into eachother like wolves lately and im sick of it. i just wanna down some tylenol and fall asleep but im too afraid that ill regret it.",1.7881341719077568,3.3204825094339654,2.6957861635220115,96.71263102725368,77.67924528301887,4.711111111111111,20.26834381551363,3.1291,-0.5500951781970649,390,9,89,0,9,123,72,106,0.17600000000000002,0.562,0.262,0.9146,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,4,0,4,13,1,2,2,0,7,6,2,1,0,21,16,9,1,5,5,1,1,2,1,1,3,1,0,0,7,7,0,0,3,1,0,1,3,4,0,0,1,2,15,9,10,13,1,6,0,1,0,1,8,3,0,1,3,54,22,0,0.0,0.1899830299589509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774504227159396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6539311178068764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18792356597555235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18043310697904213,0.08107543109805193,0.11455075615303208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238824262255274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19001002185880805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34640100516972416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17739838204220412,0.0,0.08812161563983134,0.0,0.18087654854355387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15667328561528468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471794634968754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11889405160128448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12194987058008125,0.0,0.0,0.17804454502370504,0.0,0.0,0.11116328222247432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16486173402279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12751306487299532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10886397307774616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09457584685003273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11390474214741825,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,xiwi01,2020/04/18,"What do you know about mixed (depression + anxiety) disorder? Hi. I'm F25. In my teens i struggled with Mayor Depressive Disorder, and passed though. Now, due to finishing the career, and being forced to be an ""adult"", some of the shit have come back. I went to an adult psychiatrist and she told me I probably have this. But as I didn't experienced anxiety since now, i'm curious. I want to know more. What do you know about this disorder?",2.4130952380952384,4.968523642857143,4.064285714285717,82.54738095238095,80.42857142857143,9.447619047619048,24.809523809523807,9.725611199111238,2.8099380952380955,342,13,68,12,9,114,57,84,0.182,0.718,0.10099999999999999,-0.8096,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,2,0,0,6,4,1,1,4,0,7,1,1,0,0,11,16,6,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,3,0,0,3,1,4,0,0,3,1,10,0,10,11,2,9,0,2,0,0,7,1,1,1,5,45,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2878069427577641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14464481407770974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16203992422421473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3240373660116225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6467703353269378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31014065660014195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20281416509425096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1930919920758117,0.1556063588174985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19665319129681824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1848169096183621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17974696175082008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11095202551463254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743796561745339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Depressedmommacita,2020/04/18,What is wrong with me? I have been depressed since I can remember. Blame it on my fucked up childhood. I don’t think about it anymore or blame it I really don’t. But two kids later. I’m off all meds. I’m fine per say. But I wake up every single day and am excited to go back to bed. I can’t seem to fully enjoy anything because I’m so fucking exhausted. I literally feel like I could fall asleep all day. No matter how much coffee. Energy drinks. My fatigue is relentless. I got my labs done the doctor said nothing looks concerning. I had been told that my depression is most likely from severe add which makes a lot of sense. But I hate myself. I can’t ever seem to live up to my potential. Follow through with things. And the person I want to be and who I am are just not close. I feel like I don’t have the energy to go through daily tasks. I was diagnosed with mdd. Prozac did wonders for me. But then it stopped and did nothing. My mom dad and brother are extreme heroine and meth addicts and every time I take adderall I break it up into tiny pieces and take it because I’m to scared to be an addict and don’t want to be using a substance to make me feel like I’m doing better if it’s drug induced delusion of doing better. I’m at a loss.,0.7894499178981924,2.9449859731800814,2.874475916803505,91.05650862068966,83.90421455938697,5.567651888341544,21.19882320744389,6.868970318607317,0.5202478379857687,973,31,207,12,28,328,152,261,0.14800000000000002,0.727,0.125,-0.8871,0,0,3,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,0,3,6,19,3,1,7,0,29,13,2,5,3,46,59,18,0,4,8,3,3,4,0,0,8,2,1,2,12,15,1,1,9,1,0,4,8,10,0,1,10,6,29,9,29,45,7,23,0,4,1,2,9,9,2,7,13,137,41,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523767380459873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11479633914540212,0.0,0.0,0.0952552436312198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0890072740077323,0.0,0.14112448282624376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20474907662825187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09241972748594858,0.0,0.0,0.14930282523700544,0.0,0.19939658956487205,0.11748733626777493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184785822555002,0.0,0.11845598937223488,0.0,0.11339433357471025,0.13423727683002898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10470564134736794,0.19505458310585774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17558529851317778,0.24808290799854485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140244370509295,0.0,0.0,0.1315707299876997,0.0,0.09257862487734583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11428258789719067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22620519559150085,0.0,0.10221243541585237,0.0,0.0972037622131026,0.0,0.0,0.09840946148852132,0.0,0.0,0.15453268119517136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12857601130367607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13556906599664764,0.0,0.0,0.08509211980101951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221371542366361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10107146588064032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07415463742972685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1311261176227027,0.0,0.1101080580062641,0.09205180598208404,0.11588941762428072,0.0,0.0,0.21075522483495648,0.0,0.13076847408534814,0.0,0.09575246720683464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09677508468380693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740644086846725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07690146254737625,0.07417015016657104,0.0,0.0,0.06749677968662149,0.0,0.0,0.11060740185277118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1130743213317547,0.0,0.0,0.09997383345701573,0.0,0.0,0.1365487922904476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12552970136712305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12655824903250548,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Iogarinho,2020/04/18,"What the fuck is my life I feel like I'm going to fucking kill myself. I'm tired of living in constant fear every fucking day. Only God knows how many phobias I've got. I'm scared of insects, spiders, the darkness, I'm scared of being alone, and I feel like I could die at any time and nobody would notice it. Every day I feel like something terrible is about to happen and I get hurt somehow. Hell, I can't even sleep at night. What if a spider crawls up my bed one night and I wake up with it on my face, or anywhere else on my body, huh? What if some psychopath just comes in one day and straight up kills me or kidnaps me? I just CAN'T STOP THINKING ABOUT THESE FUCKING THINGS. There's nothing I can do to stop it. My sleeping schedule's been fucked for over a month now. The only thing that distracts me from these things is gaming. But I can't do that for a very long time because I'll fuck my eyes. Please, just help me. At least try. I can't take this anymore.",0.9604148986327204,3.0708532970297067,2.0059830268741194,97.81325082508256,82.86138613861384,4.0456388495992455,20.510136727958514,4.375723439535773,-0.4779328618576146,754,22,168,1,21,237,120,202,0.256,0.66,0.084,-0.9915,0,1,1,0,0,1,24.0,0,0,0,0,10,18,9,4,6,1,14,14,6,1,0,27,35,11,3,4,8,0,3,3,0,1,2,0,1,0,14,7,0,2,5,1,0,2,4,15,0,2,2,4,22,3,23,30,2,28,1,1,1,6,2,12,7,6,17,101,36,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313033407387863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06771485076309584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875227952036432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06070038678486145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11060608990145396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08577559805760053,0.0,0.10760589348549746,0.0,0.07950304713400644,0.0,0.0,0.19265415309511724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10334379483261208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08318267114317905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06576877204083148,0.0,0.16779354512516526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11205028027907507,0.15104530865289734,0.2134105743900664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5523364557402405,0.05202416281141352,0.0,0.05659113174326388,0.0,0.07963973685536109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08805441085833371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06674345348259794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10659778361763636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203313877557099,0.0,0.0547241683990673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033322033989718,0.14594288592066973,0.0,0.08792711568840758,0.08812130919823888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10095407138981123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07948032697823221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18688998807644244,0.0,0.0955455135169839,0.1133675277450282,0.0,0.0,0.13495006333458268,0.1514635247076049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1093041522805024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1993851763546169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19929510752431487,0.0,0.0,0.07665819359448682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16649938986638846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07486849000996293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984608946993802,0.0638040503368263,0.0,0.0,0.11612671456177985,0.11444755164919355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06760532421066164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08216033258024469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07073567870344581,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,V3ston,2020/04/18,"That's how i feel and i really can't take it anymore This is my experience and i don't know if it's a good idea to share it here but i just really want to get some things off my chest and please, if you've been through the same thing i'd like to hear your experiences too. I just feel like my brain it's wrong. It's a bit embarrassing to say these things here but it's the internet after all, am i right. When i was a kid i used to have some notebooks where i used to wrote different things or questions i was anxious about and, it's weird i don't even know how to explain. Questions and different things would've popped out in my mind and i couldn't feel well till i didn't write those things down. It was distressing i was just a little kid, i was 8 or 9 maybe. I used to check the gas and the door everytime but this thing stopped concerning me after a few years. Last year i had some random pain in my body, in the pelvic area specifically and i got so anxious about it i started to search symptoms only just to reassure myself that nothing was wrong with me and different questions about these symptoms were popping out in my brain.. again and i felt trapped in my own thoughts. That i was in a circle where i get anxious, then i need to reasure myself then i got anxious about other thing, etc. I stopped with this thing too after a few months, it came back but it didn't last long. And now i just overthink everything. I've always done that i get anxious and i feel like i need reassurance from people about specific things that i have to ask things multiple times so i can be sure that a certain thing won't happen. I don't know what it is i don't understand this brain. Sorry about this long ass rant but i needed to say these things.",2.1895169667590046,4.020918210526318,3.1265850069252075,92.73965590373965,77.42105263157895,6.617763157894737,22.63859072022161,7.531066641456977,0.7127762465373957,1378,41,308,19,32,438,160,361,0.155,0.759,0.086,-0.9766,3,1,0,0,0,1,24.0,0,1,0,0,27,16,0,2,13,0,27,9,6,5,3,69,57,29,0,7,14,0,5,3,0,1,3,3,1,2,42,17,0,2,15,0,1,1,9,6,1,0,19,8,46,10,37,35,10,37,0,0,0,1,16,15,1,11,24,218,88,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05548984202506108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3766928586874623,0.06613667623178618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062344371889265275,0.0,0.0,0.05127903300006099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280613385877878,0.0740754460819084,0.0,0.22333792626128107,0.0,0.07627342124723606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090246140665216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.068245080593593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07437486044398678,0.04404686153831657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05993496480352292,0.13046751778585847,0.0,0.0,0.13487802979639044,0.09528398487898362,0.06403103472845292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10452534044174616,0.0,0.0,0.0559348148417132,0.10667313235035758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05897206717661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07516233619219716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07528274834648845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10995010824180028,0.10871940556727287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09774131231550358,0.06683899645829262,0.0,0.11803374107153056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06699716060725074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733597103041983,0.0,0.05322980570865561,0.0,0.0,0.14834514492217993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06398903117542132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050719305636110816,0.07096084096751637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04623313218567554,0.0,0.0,0.0732035084686293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2241178050985174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08544420986393046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056951273589724724,0.0,0.10606610862524407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07465186885847165,0.047202180891965234,0.0,0.0,0.11150847650167384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285274565485384,0.13862894201581138,0.050141152263027455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5759599407561308,0.0,0.0,0.05294290279432786,0.03888636778885542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06942466467372871,0.0,0.17279132168027814,0.0,0.0,0.039334369600916255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059960611416132285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047373313336840216,0.14582593840597793,0.0,0.08588990074509283
mentalhealth,isitmyeyebrows,2020/04/18,"at home with parents and toxic mother I’ve temporarily moved back in with my parents during this time to avoid the germs from the city I live in. I’ve been here for about a month or so and things have been better than I expected with my family, up until tonight. 

My mom is a bad alcoholic and she’s thankfully been sober the last two years, but that doesn’t erase any of my anger, resentment and hurt I have, as growing up with an alcoholic isn’t easy. She was always mean, mistrusting and judgmental when she was drunk, which was sadly most of the time, so it was hard for me to ever bond with her on a close level. 

Even though it has been pretty good and neutral since being here, tonight it flipped and became awful. Since getting sober, she’s development an eating disorder (something my therapist says is her “new addiction”) and is really mean about my weight.

I’m a 23 year old, five foot six female that weighs around 125 pounds - so I’m very very average and really don’t give her any reason to be mean about my weight. I eat well and moderately exercise. But she still nags me about it as I guess any mother would, to eat more healthily etc. tonight though she told me I was fat and to stop eating. 

I’ve been struggling with my body image for a while as this is the biggest I’ve ever been in my life and even though I know I’m not “fat” I’m adjusting to my new body. And this just doesn’t help.

I’m so upset and don’t want this to discourage me from my self love journey I’ve been on. 

How can I feel better and handle these situations better?",6.150294117647058,5.498794767515925,6.4198988385163,81.93321281378796,66.29299363057325,10.063394529786436,28.66167103784189,9.478462496947786,2.1319447733233408,1223,32,259,21,17,394,162,314,0.145,0.742,0.113,-0.9069,2,1,3,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,3,24,17,3,3,12,1,28,19,5,2,2,46,45,32,0,3,5,5,4,0,0,1,7,1,1,1,13,23,12,3,7,2,0,3,6,10,1,3,13,5,32,7,38,29,3,35,0,3,0,1,20,12,0,3,20,168,45,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09857677266797926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1932739939718854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0752409777017787,0.0,0.0,0.18447663072842915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08049756447447301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06953136714254535,0.07550123231446024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2399211195575887,0.0,0.20088393779823693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10363506849351244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3701100571873426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10084795724795098,0.11944993194758202,0.16358946999740842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08524479409090004,0.0,0.04572167833793219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047243414424669776,0.08674405399331599,0.0,0.07584433479478503,0.0,0.0,0.09961350938639632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810031828809523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06061007929031526,0.0,0.09070380922904002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09680200499246512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049695303624479575,0.07370857504282839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06386996535406803,0.0,0.0,0.07984707376630741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08161223817267534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2954985278888651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10590485559827367,0.07217650074740074,0.09610763561750964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17466636780069875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09488599524596138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2008128802313067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09199489709725037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11585734711975902,0.09297212572459394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07190971737117363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09433316384406144,0.0,0.0,0.1496012550970738,0.10164166955024476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06961370665702225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07221365032507165,0.07559948350756296,0.0,0.09453201161063547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325133918017191,0.0,0.1049905813575732,0.06007445892248992,0.0,0.2665267844982201,0.0,0.10545527703549867,0.0,0.0,0.0864051163530744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08833224293813753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14922045571123088,0.05333510275122836,0.0,0.0,0.22022697066337046,0.08130307930068867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06423543989955426,0.0,0.0,0.11646167786620948
mentalhealth,Robbyns,2020/04/18,"Aggressive family member refuses help and refuses to acknowledge that something is wrong. I live with my parents and older brother. My older brother is prone to lashing out, throwing things, getting mad at the littlest of things (even if it’s his fault), etc. I tried asking if he was okay and he said everything is fine when clearly it’s not. When someone does something for him (eg. Our mom will always make dinner) he will still be in a bad mood and be unappreciative. 

How do I go about this? He’s an adult and I don’t think other people should be responsible for fixing all his problems. But he’s not willing to do anything that will make things better for himself. It also gets very uncomfortable to have to live in the same house as him.",3.211146881287725,5.71250705633803,4.154446680080483,83.34281690140848,77.02816901408453,6.592354124748491,26.340040241448694,7.7094869923839395,1.6840547283702212,590,23,107,9,14,190,95,142,0.11199999999999999,0.7929999999999999,0.095,-0.5709,1,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,1,0,0,1,7,10,2,0,4,1,16,1,0,3,2,24,24,13,0,4,5,4,0,0,0,5,0,1,0,1,10,7,1,2,2,0,0,2,3,6,0,0,2,1,12,3,16,14,3,11,0,0,0,0,21,4,0,2,5,77,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14147122836327086,0.14719951007099402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14557811605481258,0.0,0.16538271984337302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1477086654893656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1564584987830222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15481115572116128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19729634505012555,0.11684438452134828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15899121592770715,0.0,0.16677071869025714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18485159735578294,0.0,0.10053944680315803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1185759974074286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20412514316479755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31242151545633395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23617152966809254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20718953068358015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19643257230889724,0.0,0.0,0.12264396794832025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16927462872848004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16827759854421662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1498914178504298,0.27238092398943736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14127692479516166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3525843705628052,0.11335387236585755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12010719149289895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14596552732424412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934183438412778,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gerards_best_man,2020/04/19,I need help! So I don't want to assume anything because I'm not like that but sometimes I wonder if I'm possibly depressed but people say kids can't have depression (I'm 14) I'm constantly tired no matter how much I sleep I could sleep for 12 hours and still be tired I can't tell if my happiness is real I'll be laughing and playing 1 minute then the next I'll be close to tears for no reason anytime I feel down I can never think of a reason behind it whenever I'm in public places in constantly stressed and scared I feel as if everyone is watching me at all times I start to fidget with things when im out in public because of this I get scared so easily very minor things can happen that no one would get scared about and I'll jump sometimes when I walk into a room and my dad's standing up and doing something I'll get frightened and jump idk why this has happened on many occasions and here recently it's felt like someone's been standing on my chest and making it hard to breathe (it's not corana I know it's not) but if someone has an explanation plz tell me I really want your help!,2.8773671497584563,4.252668108695655,4.2202898550724655,87.56381642512079,74.43478260869566,7.1980676328502415,25.386473429951693,7.793537801064563,1.2903574879227049,875,29,184,12,18,289,131,230,0.21100000000000002,0.677,0.111,-0.9714,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,1,0,0,8,11,0,4,4,0,17,6,4,4,2,43,38,23,0,9,10,1,4,2,0,1,2,1,1,1,11,13,0,0,9,1,0,3,10,6,0,1,2,6,20,5,22,31,2,30,0,2,1,0,10,13,0,6,14,108,31,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0923402701333708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13680583209737912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24252092246201046,0.0,0.08959152563552918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19329471262890696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1072226260359668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11347472522650992,0.0,0.10774036487260076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1758771877634881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984560162691282,0.11945092648343328,0.1005192094213104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15042562616778504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11050544498729924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12120736932093162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061668349990964474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964146471221242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07490185832310102,0.11376456124613855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08248815528798907,0.08320319518378991,0.08654420773795506,0.0,0.1193379017163748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07603722432410417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07779312878532042,0.0,0.11723683826333875,0.0,0.0,0.12650128651639264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277209304959875,0.07188537859829587,0.2307436385503421,0.11079503899470756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08923486315943223,0.337029009251868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2245845081221155,0.0,0.1901523991390474,0.08638567657686866,0.22195952462959528,0.0,0.07942367656012594,0.0,0.08961202241609767,0.0,0.12853756933567906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961550981956084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1490962923315361,0.07190041661884039,0.0,0.0,0.06543126269798855,0.25794057277375604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258600529083463,0.13237016552391562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012531695191862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12168827764356717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07971162867788513,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ktmsd97fptshw3dand8,2020/04/19,"I can only feel happiness whilst drunk, how do I proceed? title says all",1.24642857142857,3.911835071428573,3.1542857142857166,84.91571428571432,91.14285714285714,5.6571428571428575,21.285714285714285,7.1686216300943375,1.1946857142857144,57,2,10,1,2,19,13,14,0.15,0.625,0.225,0.29600000000000004,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,1,1,3,3,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,1,0,3,1,2,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135967016982257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6602248471671235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4716974879873056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4932157131454839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,escape209,2020/04/19,"Had chronic derealisation for 9 years, anyone else? I've never taken drugs, it just randomly happened to me when I was 13 and sitting in class. It's been permanent from that time on.

It seems to be getting gradually, slowly getting worse. I've kept telling doctors about it ever since but made almost no progress. They'll either ask me to explain it or suggest some other thing it could be e.g. anhedonia.

I feel like a pretty isolated case, having never had drugs at all and for it to be chronic and for this long. I *have,* though, had extreme social anxiety from an early age and was bullied a fair bit. Though for it to have been triggered when I was doing basically nothing is bewildering. Would be nice to see if anyone else has had a similar experience to me.",4.235319634703195,6.213046664383563,5.6426712328767135,76.27761415525117,72.08219178082193,7.880365296803652,29.97488584474885,8.59863814320734,2.530362557077625,607,26,107,11,12,204,98,146,0.096,0.792,0.11199999999999999,0.5302,0,0,2,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,1,1,7,2,0,0,4,0,22,5,0,2,4,24,33,11,0,3,5,0,1,1,0,2,5,0,0,0,12,4,0,1,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,12,2,8,2,17,14,4,14,0,0,1,0,6,3,0,6,11,81,20,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15660803779587182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964253877954335,0.0,0.0,0.2187114882668693,0.3204924399841597,0.0,0.0,0.1462091809090833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17074396411525974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12486950796908924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1600779689960555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3627394965306437,0.0,0.26129763805645195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414691675932674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529853323776619,0.0,0.0,0.07907853452348566,0.11172935872747514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16342094666674264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1383004973363474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07640720288278502,0.0,0.0,0.13840556957054526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14798570991303175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2412445275633856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15006621370637413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591109930899889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12462739131470925,0.14237707653410356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12937241638979796,0.0,0.0,0.1594260623710843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366970281149032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1039025763396045,0.0,0.30731662084664896,0.0,0.0911957857725546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15938092105772966,0.11109925611619448,0.0,0.0,0.10071391896134216
mentalhealth,Heater123YT,2020/04/19,"My sister My sister is 10F, adopted 3 years and when she got her privileges taken away for the evening for farting in my face (at about 7 PM bedtime 8:30 PM) She started bawling repeatedly screaming and sobbing ""HELLLP"" and ""PLEEASE"" for about more than a half an hour or so. She's also been hyperventilating, coughing, disobeying and flailing limbs around and this has been happening repeatedly for the years she's been with us.

She was taken away from her alcoholic mom at age 3 and was passed through families until age 7.

We think there's something wrong, can I have help?",7.842955974842766,8.040778830188676,7.330188679245285,73.97503144654087,62.58490566037736,10.085534591194973,37.477987421383645,9.725611199111238,3.609998742138366,460,21,81,8,6,144,74,106,0.078,0.872,0.05,-0.4588,0,0,2,0,0,0,15.0,2,0,0,0,8,4,0,0,4,0,9,3,1,0,0,11,15,11,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,9,1,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,0,1,8,1,13,1,17,7,1,17,0,1,0,0,13,6,1,1,10,58,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25584982688681657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19145111143713564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21312011525565272,0.0,0.0,0.4498554524060108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15812393474352512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2256885715760773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19147306788228466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117039665541957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16046730318284952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23576449300405464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28038680646536546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1843047213039908,0.0,0.0,0.16945122332088045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15340027156914765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2879732629075174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2617504444483679,0.0,0.3083363623701207
mentalhealth,honeybi00,2020/04/19,"My friend is on anti-binge medication and her new eating habits are affecting me. Trigger warning: Eating Disorders 

I have been struggling with anorexia for a few years now, and it's hard for me not to get triggered when food or weight is being brought up. I have been friends with S for about 4/5 months now. Recently, she was diagnosed with binge-eating disorder and was put on medication to lower her feeling of hungriness. She confided in me to help her keep on track with eating, making sure she doesn't under-eat as its very common for it to happen with that medication. I feel selfish for feeling this way, but I have noticed how worried I am about my weight now. Hearing about how little she eats messes with my brain, and I feel sick thinking about having to eat. I want to be a good friend and help her stay on track, but she has already begun to undereat and doesn't care what I have to say. This is has been really affecting my mental state, but how can I tell her I can't help her? I am her only friend, so she doesn't have anyone else to talk with. Does anyone have any advice to help me? 

Thank you and sorry for the sad topic... I hope everyone is well during these times.",5.747014652014656,5.92329328632479,6.107203907203907,81.0469230769231,66.991452991453,9.07887667887668,28.68009768009768,8.841846274778883,2.05800463980464,935,28,184,14,14,301,128,234,0.10400000000000001,0.72,0.175,0.9597,1,0,0,1,0,0,28.0,0,1,0,0,13,14,0,1,3,0,28,14,1,8,1,36,43,17,0,2,5,0,7,0,4,0,5,2,0,0,8,14,8,1,5,0,0,2,5,4,1,0,6,9,34,10,35,35,1,23,0,1,0,0,26,7,0,2,11,130,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09015810814078597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018142576859138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06274184541120398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12902454385886705,0.09453410794021716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10299576114390284,0.0,0.0,0.09406803998673632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09364476642798658,0.0,0.0,0.21148224859456247,0.0,0.08073976918311866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5664470646319479,0.07707370296089759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08816102773921007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18660330880233844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11156450412963344,0.0,0.2851279397847131,0.0,0.0482034877722853,0.0,0.0,0.07738563161447633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815876601895893,0.0,0.08264931701209205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398684390593828,0.0,0.24736715172071316,0.0,0.0,0.0916377455069094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08200738656180517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0924715308710638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06158611343025901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2788350937674061,0.09297916874030693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364326041190854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08910795533137761,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504177178672032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07016999185221383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09274956402084067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059105891087969924,0.0,0.09109835178726887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07337105550524756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328061403549546,0.0,0.09833983371116116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645307650294056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0869565660486939,0.0,0.0,0.07415731729396502,0.08064172503763181,0.08494315999527469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059118255710954665,0.0,0.0,0.05379916141760906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07612644534531265,0.05441897044511484,0.07323388999676897,0.0,0.22470238903722964,0.08295530788040162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09369731846878307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059414197019089586
mentalhealth,mysticlovee,2020/04/19,"My mental health disorder destroyed my marriage.  

TLDR ; I dont know if its my fault or my illness, but my marriage sucks and im literally stuck with no options due to being an immigrant. we never talk anymore and were just broken.

My husband and i have been married for 5 years next month, we have a son together, Hes a really good person and father but our marriage sucks.  
Unfortunately my pregnancy resulted in some really bad Post partum depression and anxiety which resulted in round the clock panic disorder, agoraphobia you name it.

I worked really hard going to therapy, trying medications, doing self help, meditations, you think of it you name it ive given 120% effort into trying to ""cure"" me its been almost 4 years since i got diagnoses with treatment resistant anxiety disorder our lives have been really destroyed by it.

But he makes it out to be like its my fault, like i'm not doing anything good enough if i ask for help when i'm having a panic attack he gets annoyed at me and shuts down and tells me he cant do anything and to just take my pills .

I feel like I have no support. i'm trying to be a good mom and wife but it seems like everytime i get up i get hit 10x harder.

Im also an immigrant to the USA from Canada, it hasnt been easy USCIS fucked up a ton of paperwork and delayed my case , so i cant drive here, i only just got permission to leave the country to go back home and the boarders are closed , i only just got a social to work (but theres a pandemic). Its been really really hard being an immigrant with no ability to do anything.

I havent seen my family in years, i miss home. I miss being happy

I cant get a divorce because ive been jobless the last 5 years I have no money, Im still considered mental health issue because we havent found the right medications for my disorder yet . Obviously my husband wouldnt agree to letting me take my son back home, and I dont want him to make me leave and keep our son in america.

Its like.. I have no options. either co-parent for the next 16 some years, attempt a divorce but my husbands family is rich and they will use my mental health against me to win that im ""unstable"" .

We dont talk anymore ever. unless its to parent, we dont touch eachother, were just so beyond broken.we tried therapy.

It feels like I have no options, ,....",3.913554931734083,5.1920848221258185,5.7213685083577905,78.19296765343884,71.7114967462039,8.981013142784231,28.092446089064694,9.402419484367199,2.550798851601378,1817,67,345,41,34,626,212,461,0.22,0.67,0.11,-0.9936,3,0,0,0,2,0,55.0,8,3,1,5,17,28,7,2,19,0,43,9,0,5,3,68,79,28,0,4,17,10,6,6,0,2,8,0,3,2,16,25,0,2,6,0,2,3,19,15,0,0,15,7,58,13,39,55,5,37,0,3,2,1,43,14,3,10,25,224,74,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06440887460815091,0.0,0.0,0.05143802692106566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09841182338414524,0.0,0.12757965222502982,0.0,0.0,0.15879379445657502,0.0,0.06013209112554141,0.07317520056878236,0.0,0.098918808282043,0.053705918862928616,0.07841980229266964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055400171601557295,0.06528515462022991,0.0,0.0,0.2948728866668126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3015381352844129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0664614931507484,0.0,0.0,0.05818264505881213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127351712261028,0.0,0.06504595148504927,0.09190284684758054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0705254057899618,0.0,0.059464359773769425,0.13442169904361068,0.0,0.07311098986163245,0.16184992876949594,0.15433177817234006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06847162796275635,0.1152391883969343,0.0,0.0,0.2051128246902144,0.0,0.0,0.08622693698783274,0.0,0.19355967855164688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2779138226152902,0.06713512609965977,0.0,0.0571720675474755,0.0,0.0,0.03534951500140933,0.052430756815529035,0.0,0.1362147506593938,0.0,0.06577327913338629,0.0,0.18854595277101047,0.0,0.056797224809194025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587044617908013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1295946579435043,0.1944633845290022,0.0,0.0,0.07533277812290394,0.051340953970199096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04960884749091179,0.0,0.1368136798723428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09783907723866056,0.0,0.15093527301623916,0.07142161738112461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05616321288169981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06160239247565125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24723670435626394,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05493036611701959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058556044751120126,0.06710154375218337,0.0,0.0,0.05320756113338925,0.0,0.0,0.06556785593543203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05136737939589117,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07299148399765543,0.0,0.0,0.0967238018653987,0.10339866519889288,0.05621998632430197,0.0,0.14711490115871154,0.0,0.0,0.041214737482804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17468080318243126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0555532824435019,0.0,0.0,0.037938595346010406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09365390306512766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2071052759798882
mentalhealth,woodz20,2020/04/19,I'm 20 years old and I'm broken This is properly a lot different from the rest of these posts on here I just need 2 say some stuff. I grew up very poor had a good mum and sort of dad they were  not together as a kid I would go 2 my dads every second weekend. when I was about 4 or 5 my dad was in the army so I would be staying at his girlfriends house she was a horrible person she would hit me starve treat me like a dog blame things on me problem was I didn't tell anyone it was happening at the same time this was happening my mum was in an abusive relationship I was always a weird kid and my mums boyfriend would judge me for it long story short because of all the stuff that i grew up locking my self away I grew up with no friends not any social life I was bullied all the time I was a small fat teen with no brains at all no hobbies lazy. When I was 17 I turned some of it around I started exercising got really invested in it obsessed more like. I'm weird if got a weird fetish think I'm probably gay never had a girlfriend or boyfriend the more I do the more  miserable I am realising how different I am my heart hurts thinking about this stuff  almost like am suffocating I'm a very positive person  I'm good 2 everyone always smiling and laughing but  the people i know are toxic people they hate life they hate everyone and everything it makes me sad I just wish I could be happy I just don't know what do in life I'm always switching from one thing 2 another I just don't know how 2 stop hurting i just want it 2 go away I'm sorry this is so long,0.2506722106722137,2.4700448318318315,2.339399399399401,93.49819126819128,87.16816816816817,5.817787017787018,20.250173250173248,7.2200825789825185,0.5038920304920302,1231,39,278,20,39,412,167,333,0.16,0.742,0.098,-0.9469,2,0,0,0,1,0,4.0,0,0,3,0,15,20,2,2,19,0,32,8,3,3,4,47,60,16,0,10,11,6,0,3,3,4,5,1,0,5,18,8,1,1,5,2,2,5,9,11,0,2,17,1,40,9,27,35,11,36,0,4,0,1,24,17,0,8,15,176,58,0,0.0,0.11137227190249413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09412542963979656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23464162454942236,0.0,0.0,0.06392187054283148,0.09856510996041754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06572559457998986,0.0,0.0,0.08367815817698898,0.0,0.0,0.17662845038374514,0.0,0.0,0.05730031480887988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049328668475104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07504976278305904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19641582925807852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07919737803851874,0.17963825466512112,0.08447935090810338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07262262982389113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10684247122749917,0.1576821431858129,0.1503575919304238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16624426069559478,0.10006263017853054,0.0,0.18560715001507175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11138809515371136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10846108382759166,0.2012536289387456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15497654511005945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.199180724232396,0.1377680398810313,0.0,0.0,0.16637056288705673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07991374721857962,0.0,0.0,0.06274440198761133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06969833382164964,0.07249706057472861,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0986350999661665,0.0,0.06369548467587671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13033277020510858,0.16415087438190892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09002411071278471,0.0,0.10134575373074073,0.08994340144360206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06021753255235353,0.0,0.0,0.1009186856199543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475099083967694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806042526892073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581913436664537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10522307714561048,0.06653227571372021,0.10018937247526187,0.0,0.07858654582090616,0.0,0.0,0.3228156999587881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08215840440175529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12489620298281814,0.12046025944907365,0.0,0.0,0.10962199179545326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224284333369013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.155116406039917,0.0554424620613028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10809307325636353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670939592060773,0.0,0.0,0.060531636985964914
mentalhealth,butterlight,2020/04/19,"I fell like an asshole I was always a really extroverted person, a bit shy but extroverted. But I get mentally tired of social interaction easily recently. I got in a long distance relationship a year ago bcs I wanted to like them, and I thought this way I wouldn’t get as drained as with real contact. Didn’t worked, after some time I just don’t wanna talk anymore, I don’t wanna be with people anymore, not only partners, friends, family, everyone. I thought I was good now, started going out with someone, but it started all over again, I get exited to talk to them, to see them, but when we are talking or together, I have this felling that I just wanna run, just wanna hide where no one sees me, were I can just close my eyes and not do anything. I don’t know if I should drag this relationship anymore, but it only started. I don’t wanna regret later. 
I fell like a spoiled brat that want to run from the decisions that I made. But I want to like them, I want to enjoy being with them, I really do, but it hurts me, it get me mentally exhausted just thinking that I need to go through wanting to see them to wanting to go home in just some hours. 
I fell like I’m meant to be alone forever.",6.860500000000003,5.553253383333337,7.746666666666666,75.14500000000002,65.16666666666666,11.0,35.0,10.125756701596842,3.317874999999999,932,36,187,18,12,316,124,240,0.134,0.742,0.124,-0.5237,0,1,0,0,0,0,31.0,1,0,6,1,10,11,0,0,7,0,18,3,1,1,1,52,46,14,0,16,17,0,0,5,2,2,2,0,1,2,11,9,0,0,6,0,0,9,9,3,0,1,9,4,36,8,31,32,4,31,0,2,4,0,18,7,0,4,19,131,47,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0939650038609467,0.0,0.0,0.10978683564140622,0.0,0.0,0.08820274387011674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3153786045088305,0.0,0.0,0.08723119579191446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11572750151314255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012901291230522,0.0,0.0,0.09992991809943944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189742842726247,0.0,0.2215281570936002,0.0,0.18073134355430726,0.08891004131310831,0.084780048267864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632935798870964,0.0,0.10439131371217544,0.0,0.11347809017455544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05825631552145599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589378410256269,0.0,0.0,0.09380905992723834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10030232434057253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21365159297640754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0785996640372305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07183017759109438,0.16123967057868469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0734889300035253,0.09255747498104464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12065428743850573,0.13581609683460738,0.0,0.10466488483692864,0.2276144736861244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2534112996325185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10805641048505507,0.08981574959464013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22508778468559784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25560288157067834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06792225440254228,0.0,0.1683086173790003,0.06181103086526218,0.12183451799419552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37513885791585694,0.08414001474550632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07717123313517049,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826226783117997
mentalhealth,Trash898989,2020/04/19,"I have given up Hello,

I am gonna kill myself tonight. I have no reason to live. I am constantly bullied and I am just done with it. I am not looking for help I just needed to put it out there. 

Thanks,
X",-0.8113333333333337,1.0338772000000027,2.0800000000000023,96.18000000000002,88.11111111111109,4.488888888888889,17.88888888888889,5.6839178017228535,-0.4759777777777776,154,4,37,1,5,54,32,45,0.281,0.657,0.061,-0.8849,0,0,0,0,0,1,6.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,0,7,0,0,1,0,8,12,1,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,1,8,1,6,9,0,5,0,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,2,29,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3634939930167727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34422094727735336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22546018278625696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3721410293063727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2970188466520611,0.0,0.2824641563946064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24941239165744344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3381424495859348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34584202339499664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3096821909579885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fawnroyale_,2020/04/19,"Eating Even When You Dont Want To? Ever since January I've (19F) been struggling a lot to eat a healthy amount. It started because of a depressive episode and anxiety towards eating alone in a public place after falling out with my friends. This lead to me eating very little if any nutritious food on a daily basis because all I had the energy to do after forcing myself to go to class was lay on the floor and eat whatever packaged food was lying around, usually cookies and chips. 

I have since dropped out of school and am in a much better place mentally, which I thought would lead to me also eating better as well, but that hasn't been the case. I am living with my parents right now who rarely cook since becoming empty nesters and am now back to basically living off of packaged food aside from the occasional grilled protein my dad cooks. Cooking for myself from scratch isn't really an option, as my mom can be quite controlling about what goes on in the kitchen. (Ramen and Mac & Cheese are all I could make) 

Aside from being generally unhealthy, it has made eating even more difficult. Everything that isn't a cooked meal or a raw fruit/vegetable is incredibly unappetizing to the point where it makes me nauseas. I've also been using soda to help fill my stomach when it's unbearably empty, so most days my diet has been something along the lines of 4-6 cuties oranges, a banana, 2 cans of soda, and a small amount of some sort of protein. 

Has anyone else dealt with this? I'm very worried that if I don't change I could develop an eating disorder. Are there steps I can take to treat this myself or is it too late? 

Note: My dad works long hours at a blue-collar labor job and my mom is a stroke survivor, so I am very grateful that they do cook, even if it's not often! I just felt it was important to mention it in the story for context",7.235569933120093,6.539258157458563,7.356548415236991,76.2545899970922,64.11049723756906,10.162489095667349,33.96975865077057,9.414487439383343,2.9725889502762435,1471,54,277,23,19,476,209,362,0.084,0.825,0.092,0.6982,2,1,1,0,0,0,35.0,0,1,1,7,21,8,0,1,22,0,36,23,1,7,3,46,47,22,0,7,8,5,3,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,18,15,21,1,2,5,0,6,6,3,1,0,11,3,26,5,46,31,9,42,0,1,0,0,12,21,0,11,14,189,44,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08154683212624113,0.0,0.12593042761432738,0.0,0.08531050853483955,0.0,0.053543233590962164,0.0,0.06023288480761928,0.0,0.0,0.055054097034648364,0.08067441737779048,0.0,0.07009180319167704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060543184545030715,0.0,0.0959935657262017,0.08695781310666062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13927132664069686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08329233138834928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830920749127767,0.12572870429212665,0.0,0.0,0.0507782571828524,0.0,0.06781526933757717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09023836773231517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227809801264417,0.0,0.0,0.6445333211506553,0.06577389068347107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15601331250184908,0.07122129104244662,0.0,0.0,0.07076291073576392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559898315885531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2856239372267229,0.0,0.060831299203690924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04474752808224251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05277513396564821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07753917748872563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07813340907910261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08881772644130348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07891423571451224,0.13905080026698474,0.0696789520994433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06693859860666053,0.0,0.07450198156351281,0.10511388805172132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07934744855411494,0.0,0.0,0.1844294878757764,0.0,0.0,0.057880077441686835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08742709777256716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16452488854938935,0.0,0.07443104425991842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08374551166900608,0.0,0.0,0.05044034826173617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06724018112847675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07968511531151673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19539389417459668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06061488019298344,0.0,0.0,0.05572980186008529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08231204504612273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059199732466822176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06250765169894686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800269209611398,0.08671666710023432,0.1948965328733772,0.046440579285258486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07079319070614018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057320803142588514,0.07996031000906696,0.0,0.05593185136425,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_throwaway0008,2020/04/19,"I'm really close to self harming This coronavirus has absolutely ruined my life. 

I have multiple sclerosis, Im 22, Im a full time student, and I worked at a supermarket for 3+years. 

I had an MS attack early this past February. As a result, I quit my job. I was in the hospital, and in pain. I was just exhausted...

Then all of this coronavirus crap happened. I interviewed at a few places, but no one is hiring. I moved in with my father in february, and have been paying him rent...He said that if I dont pay him, he will kick me out. Im blowing through my savings, with NO light at the end of the tunnel. 

I don't qualify for unemployment, and didn't qualify for the governemnt stimulus check. Im going to have to drop out of school, and end up homeless. 

Im suicidal and depressed. Is this Emergency Money for the Peoples Act real? Will US citizens be receiving money per month?? If not, I don't know what I will do",1.2712162162162173,3.5664857837837864,3.9634459459459457,83.12192567567571,83.05405405405406,8.240540540540541,25.466216216216218,8.982922981607832,2.4260324324324327,710,30,144,21,20,250,112,185,0.187,0.7879999999999999,0.025,-0.9833,4,0,0,0,0,0,34.0,1,0,0,2,1,8,2,0,10,0,19,4,1,1,1,21,24,11,1,2,5,1,0,0,0,3,3,1,0,2,6,11,0,0,1,0,5,4,7,7,0,1,6,2,20,1,24,14,3,25,0,2,0,0,10,13,1,2,7,97,26,11,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15448253366015194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11695709485853995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15914672857680726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2405420819101884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0771734881793068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200800518770384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.733391079270643,0.0,0.1347521970575159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746275049282879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09591361369371662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838754917235163,0.14432496690006708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09201589362796037,0.0,0.14449182252843432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962843487752831,0.09414078863248404,0.0,0.1418733065917299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14443106763304706,0.0,0.15456055450537204,0.08699156773940249,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12916889514540594,0.0,0.0,0.13742833555537606,0.0,0.0,0.14166024022853346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1485339562516459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07918116635476195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1633405595179642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988578925661012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08744532989064964
mentalhealth,IHazOwies,2020/04/19,"Best treatment/s for jumpyness? I am easily startled by sounds or when I see movement out the corner of my eye. I practice mindfulness,  and during the practice am often able to not care about these things. Is there a sort of therapy that can help with this sort of treatment? I have not found CBT very useful. Thanks for any help.",2.582857142857144,5.27110315873016,2.9041269841269863,90.27142857142859,80.90476190476191,5.504761904761906,23.285714285714285,6.868970318607317,0.8607523809523814,261,9,49,3,7,80,50,63,0.06,0.68,0.26,0.9372,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,4,0,1,3,0,5,1,1,1,0,12,10,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,4,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,1,3,5,3,10,9,1,4,0,0,2,0,2,2,0,4,1,35,9,0,0.2853577642321253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19405306501253392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2994653683866149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909412587326939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31288005965584553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38253858856256223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2881299955199453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2273931926987233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26271909028021045,0.3263314725751855,0.0,0.18957901881957248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24645748762887515,0.0,0.2354500405741825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TheDarkMartyr,2020/04/19,"Does Abilify interfere with anyone else ability to do play video games or be a competitive gamer, or also. Hinder my spiritual capabilities, like it does to me? Can’t really go into details. But I feel like this drug dampens my ability to perform in highly competitive environments, as well as make me completely incapable of being a spiritually invested person, or having a sense of spiritual awareness.

To put it simply.

I feel like I lack awareness than when I do not on Abilify.

Anyone else feel the same way?",6.234037267080746,8.279496565217396,8.518322981366463,57.39934782608697,67.04347826086956,12.213664596273293,34.88198757763975,11.765960540728905,5.3391161490683245,412,20,61,16,7,148,64,92,0.053,0.741,0.207,0.9035,0,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,4,0,6,1,0,1,0,14,11,8,0,1,5,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,2,0,1,3,3,1,2,2,0,1,0,0,3,8,5,13,9,2,8,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,3,4,44,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536446455713212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26868064808112513,0.3937155618225894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20144249149554527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3362649130349929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22280741579873814,0.0,0.3209964839588612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2914369803814406,0.2745124798927531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10919073686376787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029937189722564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28159202268648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824689298913186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16775870798071926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19314164751180926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308207917633945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15250221730957486,0.0,0.0,0.17274609323521994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Haunting-Hornet,2020/04/19,"I got sucked into an mlm and it's taking its toll on my mental health. Never wanted to be in. I feel stuck. I don't know if it's the best place to post this but since it is affecting my mental health I think it fits.

For those who don't know what an mlm is, multi level marketing (a new name for pyramid schemes to make the ""businesses"" legal). One of my parents is obsessed with mlm's. I always found the idea dodgy but thought ""well, as long as they are not spending more of their income than I'm spending in the pub (they don't drink) it's not really my business, each with their own hoby"". Then, about 3 months ago they were like ""there's this new thing and I want to put you above me so you'll make money off me, I'll pay for your membership and you don't have to do anything, just sign up, join the Facebook group and I'll do everything"". Little, naive, people pleasing me accepted. What could go wrong? Right? It's not my hard earned money and I don't have to do anything. Right?

Well, the first part was true, not my money. The second part tho, not true. I often get invited to online conferences (by relative strangers), tagged on posts on Facebook (by relative strangers) and asked to tell my friends and coworkers about it (by my parent in question). I'm not attending those conferences, I know what they are going to say because it's always the cliche ""if I can do it you can too... don't look at how I started as a millionaire, I was a commoner just like you and look how much I'm making"" and I'm not giving my time to that. I'm not telling my friends about it because I don't want to keep bugging my friends ""hey pal, want a deal?"", it's creepy and I value my few friendships too much and definitely not telling my coworkers, I'm new in the office, I want to be liked. Then there's the Facebook posts which triggered this panic I'm feeling now. Usually I can ignore them but the last one was a bit too big. Basically I had to upgrade to keep the membership (wasn't me who paid for it so I obliged) so there was this post with my picture and ""congrats for the upgrade"" and lots of congrats comments. Not even my profile picture, an older one (because my face isn't really seen in my profile pic), which I find creepy. 

These businesses are against everything I believe in: hard work (although hard work is needed, they are promoted as an ""easy fix"" to people not having money from hard work), proper workers rights, work ethics. And there's the fact that I'm not cut for that. I hate having to persuade people and I lack persuasion. I hate having to trick people. I feel like a hypocrite being in one. And then there's this social media attention. I don't like having this kind of public attention, it's terrifying for me. All I post on Facebook are pics of my cat and one picture of me a year so people I haven't seen in some time know what I look like. All because I don't want social media attention, I'm there for cat pics and to use messenger with the friends who don't have Whatsapp.

So every time I hear of this ""businesses"" I want out. I don't want to tell that parent because I don't want to disappoint or sound ungrateful or unsupportive. Tried to drop hints but they were met with persuasion. And I feel bad they wasted almost 400$ on my fees alone and now I want out. I can't tell the other parent anything about it because they'd fight for me to be out but I don't want them to fight my battles, I'm an adult. And I didn't tell my friends and boyfriend about it because I'm ashamed and because I don't want them to think anything bad about my parent, I love my family and I want them to get along with my boyfriend should we be in a more serious place when they'd meet. It's all taking a toll on my already not great mental health. I feel stuck and really needed to tell someone about it.",2.7380798969072155,4.361579521907217,3.7823067010309295,89.54126932989695,75.30154639175258,6.860309278350518,24.88273195876289,7.588611131419004,1.1162690721649482,2983,99,632,39,64,963,280,776,0.11800000000000001,0.7290000000000001,0.153,0.9652,6,1,1,0,2,0,105.0,1,6,15,9,33,37,8,3,30,0,59,6,1,8,7,124,128,51,0,20,24,5,9,6,6,2,3,3,0,1,43,38,1,3,20,2,9,4,33,17,2,7,18,17,96,20,88,100,17,64,0,1,5,1,62,31,1,9,29,414,139,10,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04437373735040776,0.0,0.05012624097875603,0.05184538933764552,0.05524067187870338,0.0,0.08330517169710923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647751401813611,0.0,0.04679783195488345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08359331993569713,0.2441210116552051,0.0,0.0,0.056398657085223264,0.052533185987907086,0.0,0.054650790670561535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039967546592440964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05160799617857717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04903815920854215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0330630907320935,0.0,0.04217634779077765,0.0,0.08997849608875655,0.0,0.047190589655637036,0.0,0.12655511599404026,0.0357617197609951,0.0,0.0,0.04575245638521422,0.042579636131027214,0.0,0.05488643462969009,0.19337491775571292,0.0,0.05230687944810908,0.04802056361001854,0.05689866681098324,0.0,0.040036262861865735,0.0551895454354225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17936991953124362,0.09884458179516167,0.0,0.15962916509262998,0.056419437262219714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056509822770824364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08898838405649788,0.0,0.05212810407850555,0.1100431155316946,0.0408042644250948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14673598819521674,0.05017165189897127,0.0,0.04430009487851467,0.12610930590993366,0.0,0.0,0.04255784824487282,0.045179646259430314,0.0,0.10024308073179304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15134123261348978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0399561247801051,0.0,0.0735973445347778,0.07423531537293797,0.03860811198978952,0.14504009853200975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696042836850821,0.0,0.0,0.058732728319156866,0.2779195588899253,0.10841670413120562,0.0,0.1735209037486266,0.0,0.10460071446271407,0.054949073733673526,0.0,0.0,0.2397104738196769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.050322502461037005,0.056076846838859794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096206048442486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824876008707212,0.0,0.0398084364084134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041408812799325685,0.0,0.0,0.10205643762836054,0.042414306589508614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03543158207142909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07527535033305588,0.0,0.30627264016353273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03325656622236217,0.06415078280773931,0.0,0.0397407655750124,0.0875683393691543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033986357035250554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043234371658645215,0.055132238134213335,0.0,0.3838345165263388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09001699854954759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14577239991240454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05473098495809196,0.0,0.03223595827406644
mentalhealth,Affirmati0nhacks,2020/04/19,"Intro To The Community And My Story Hi everyone! My name is Brandon Kohl and I'm one of the founders of Affirmation Hacks ([https://affirmationhacks.com](https://affirmationhacks.com)), which is a company that creates mental health products to help people master their mindset and emotions so they can be more confident and live life fully! All in all to stay more POSITIVE!  I'm super excited to be a part of this group and hopefully I bring value so we can all grow and progress in our mental health together. 

Just so everyone can know a bit about me... (: 

I'm incredibly passionate about people chasing their dreams and passions. And I  believe ANYONE can do ANYTHING they put their mind to. My life is living proof of that perspective. But sometimes it can be far from easy. For example, when I was younger I was diagnosed with multiple disorders (dyslexia, turrets, ADHD, severe OCD) and my family and I were actually told that I would need to be on assisted living for my entire life. I was made fun of severely in high school for being fat, ugly, stupid, and the list goes on. I would say I had a rough life as a kid and I came from a very broken family.  It it weren't for my Mom who; 

\- Consistently spoke life into me

\- Told me I could do anything I put my mind to. 

\- Made me say affirmations and do positive self talk, 

\- Believed that what she fed into my subconscious would eventually outweigh anything coming into my conscious, 

\- And did everything she could to make sure I could chase every one one of my dreams

I would 100% not be where I'm at today if it weren't for those things my mom did for me. I went from being LABELED as I said above by professionals and individuals, to now having sold 3 companies, being able to work and befriend some of the wealthiest and influential people in the world, and to now, chasing my dream and passion full-time, which is to help people have better mental health and positivity so they to can live life to the fullest and chase their dreams.  I very STRONGLY believe if it weren't for what my Mom had me do and my self action with mental health, I would most definitely not be where I'm at today, or may not even be here today.

​

I want to to get plugged into this community, bring as much value as I can and if anyone relates to my story or wants to personally talk to me, PLEASE reach out. You all have potential, you all are amazing, and you have a uniqueness in you that no one else has. You all are AMAZING!",5.5604774678111575,6.771978167381978,6.295383583690988,75.86522129828326,67.75536480686695,9.17263948497854,29.58395922746781,9.435801123606538,2.608390772532189,1950,70,359,39,32,640,215,466,0.035,0.768,0.19699999999999998,0.9976,0,0,0,0,0,0,77.0,2,5,7,7,14,13,1,0,13,0,52,16,1,4,8,76,77,39,0,15,10,3,1,0,0,6,12,4,0,4,19,34,2,0,2,4,1,9,7,1,0,4,21,5,58,12,59,37,13,35,0,0,0,3,37,19,0,9,6,263,77,3,0.06851426196128971,0.0,0.06686003637311203,0.0,0.08234082853853246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742351742101011,0.08325232754264493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09581352999854363,0.0,0.16914419940205644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2315763334088254,0.0,0.060595296952319765,0.07479982902345722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836206327606647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059018970012296626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16410918935956134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954053367682482,0.0,0.0,0.07852328000492304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0572348743105849,0.07706932293890421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04525302385203782,0.0,0.0577262206982745,0.13093662683640994,0.061576200825692914,0.0,0.12917829712788345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035795874052895436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2913098263740884,0.0,0.0,0.09184733114798767,0.07238907945611196,0.0,0.06805012143836202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03765364657117929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903618965842343,0.0,0.0,0.2419973942051476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12965970254664394,0.045733801881124095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2761850453223458,0.0,0.13835974672061396,0.24072922662886356,0.0,0.0,0.0503658658935674,0.050802457103235284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18570814827202534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07419426903798905,0.0,0.18999664997541652,0.05982401082631875,0.0,0.0752080851867736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1377515140744586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06517275273330532,0.10897058214546401,0.0,0.06934009090669832,0.0,0.0,0.14295063526187018,0.15480322841387664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776235698485758,0.0,0.0,0.07302708713810807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06457388106553104,0.0,0.0,0.11013833698073616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04551783124850466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19483052753078114,0.13093662683640994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11306288302408657,0.08082297369617153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635134072531333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04987919870874055,0.0,0.0,0.2433528296354557,0.0,0.08325232754264493,0.0
mentalhealth,SealevelBluegrass,2020/04/19,"Anxiety to live up in the tech industry I’m a middle school student interested in game design. It’s a career I have been trying to follow for a little bit now, but I’m already scared I won’t be able to live up to the professionals. To get further in my education, I have been learning programing languages that will (supposedly) help me on my way. I use several resources (duh) including a Udemy class to educate myself. I spend a large amount of my time planning out what I’m going to learn and how I will study. Hard and focused grinding on my Udemy course is usually what I opt for when I’m studying. Once I have a plan I fall asleep assured that I will learn well. Everything is fine from then on until I actually start studying. I‘ve always known the importance of quality work so it’s easy for me to start, but once I’ve listened to several lectures I question my ability to go on. What makes it even worse is when I have to look at the solution in order to understand the course material. I back myself away from the computer, but I feel ashamed. I feel bad if I do it and I feel bad if I don’t. Breaks drive me into a screeching halt and then a detour into watching dozens of videos from people in the tech industry. I get warped and wrapped up into thinking about how much they worked to get where they’re at and in what amount of time. I see videos about 14 year olds working at flagship software companies. I wonder how much did they grind (in an educational sense) to get that far? I feel like I’m not learning enough in the amount of time that I give myself. Sometimes I try to reassure myself by realizing I’m just in middle school, and I’ll probably be far in high school, but will I really? I‘ve seen people much younger than me much farther. My parents and friends try to reassure me. They say they’re proud of me and to not get overworked. But they‘re outsiders looking in, and they probably think I’ll be well off anyways because I have good grades. Please, somebody who’s not an outsider, tell me what to do.   


TL;DR (For those of you who don’t want to help) I don’t know what amount of time I should use for studying to live up to the professionals.",4.225103046594982,5.404887976851857,5.195764635603346,82.63215053763442,70.85185185185185,8.444563918757467,29.676224611708484,8.841846274778883,2.288809199522103,1714,68,343,31,31,562,202,432,0.055999999999999994,0.804,0.14,0.9865,1,0,0,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,4,6,16,15,0,2,19,1,25,1,1,6,1,51,60,26,0,4,11,1,5,1,1,6,0,2,0,0,17,14,0,1,16,3,1,5,7,4,2,1,4,12,51,11,70,47,10,61,0,0,5,0,19,37,0,4,17,224,68,19,0.0926525578020569,0.0,0.09041553112266464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10224440148637112,0.0,0.07709435033296558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07087895311737072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0870501279907295,0.07124409784870088,0.15472203132958534,0.05648013926618387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10115259631776362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957348597994025,0.0,0.0611961406011746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327014468107369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18739166849036729,0.06619100580664587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158313632326221,0.0,0.2420356867913792,0.08888077603627806,0.10531316755588276,0.07771256961353466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08299849297362051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12420611292524243,0.09789251429628698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05091942269429271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04526535968061831,0.09286220361795644,0.2454417180382941,0.0,0.15560962682152302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06184630179177523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2724411628977902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722327357544852,0.1973439004136459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10287970074821497,0.0,0.0,0.1284672350699075,0.0,0.0,0.10170468542573778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19979025608639606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379206927228816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05935560103233181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07368103276556362,0.09276137372925224,0.2813080049389973,0.07383209280114215,0.0,0.0,0.20934203562851506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0916357487860028,0.0,0.1311599145847875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08098241934579177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11873603578649028,0.0,0.0,0.216105806186048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1887150146219153,0.0,0.0,0.0964545802398905,0.0,0.1600441234163086,0.10204370256419554,0.0,0.05464887913665045,0.07354328776169364,0.0,0.0,0.16661155317783696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10047774664282597,0.20235649669960507,0.0,0.0944208719297565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0596652094910928
mentalhealth,sabrinchen2000,2020/04/19,"Favorite Movies depicting mental disorders? I just watched girl interrupted and it blew my mind. What are your recommendations for movies containing one or more mentally ill characters? I want to talk about  movies in which a disorder is not (!) evil, cliché‘d or condemned, but rather relatable.",7.220851063829786,10.951280872340428,5.901531914893623,69.49400000000003,70.06382978723404,11.419574468085113,37.05957446808511,10.793553405168565,5.554339574468086,239,13,35,9,5,71,43,47,0.157,0.738,0.105,-0.3986,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,1,0,0,3,1,1,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,10,3,4,0,2,6,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,3,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,1,4,0,4,3,1,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,2,0,23,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6675873411906584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5870158508145824,0.0,0.29407589518432176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19735613587236364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23409286883940866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1717847054834148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,anonymquestionscomme,2020/04/19,"inability to cry when im sad I have never ever cried in my life because of sadness even though there are a lot of things in my life people would cry about. 
The only time I cry is when my mom screams  at me and then I can’t stop crying and more and more thoughts are coming into my head increasing my tears. 
Maybe I am putting too much thoughts into this but I would love to just cry so that I can get a feeling of relief. 

English isn’t my first language so I’m sorry if there is any grammar mistakes.",2.7019811320754705,3.821488962264152,3.8265566037735854,91.22775943396229,74.47169811320755,6.054716981132076,25.514150943396224,5.985473137389443,0.6122867924528301,394,13,87,2,8,128,72,106,0.23600000000000002,0.6509999999999999,0.11199999999999999,-0.826,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,12,6,0,0,3,0,11,4,1,0,2,19,18,11,0,4,3,1,1,0,0,2,2,1,0,0,3,6,0,1,3,0,0,3,3,4,0,1,2,2,13,2,11,14,5,16,0,2,0,1,2,5,0,2,8,64,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301908937857187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07441928585852657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10516174755457484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8045997610823846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806331772550019,0.11042901838689463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061727690149484336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384181489342596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637821478392734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12529005931040854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13186814812447195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17245847372857034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10378867931392027,0.11018263400338377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12264651187751224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14297948695974694,0.0,0.0,0.0897433905295766,0.0,0.09415619255860616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0928479037728835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463541356603968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272486240729442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13665939328835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10206496487125563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08110501891154095,0.0,0.11994370699784902,0.1938369416715781,0.07118626111407192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17344530974690525,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,StubbornCub,2020/04/19,"What’s your neighbor’s reaction when you have a breakdown or if police got involved—involuntary committed? I just talk to my close friend and she confided to me her sister was recently discharge for involuntary psychiatric hold due to severe mental illness with anger outburst. She said that her family is so ashamed because neighbors had to get involved. She cannot handle her at that time, so she asked help to her neighbors. She’s thinking that their neighbors are laughing at them and now they know her sister is mentally ill. Her family is worried about the stigma. They are renting an apartment and she’s worried that the landlord will treat them badly because of it and if neighbors will complain about them. One of her neighbor told her it was fine and she shouldn’t be ashamed to ask for help. She mentioned that this is not the first time that her sister is involuntary committed. Her sister has no job and depends on her and their mother. They don’t want 

She’s still worried and it’s affecting her own mental health. They always keep her sisters condition behind closed doors. 

Her mom is a single mother who has her own mental health issues. She is so stressed and I can’t do anything except to listen and be there whenever she need someone to talk to.

What is your experience in dealing with your mentally ill family? 

What can I do to help her?",4.492411067193675,7.0042912845849825,4.650988142292492,81.30952569169963,72.91304347826087,7.245849802371541,29.57707509881423,8.18289091462,2.3462948616600783,1097,47,186,18,23,342,129,253,0.146,0.764,0.091,-0.9464,2,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,4,9,1,10,10,1,3,6,0,27,5,0,2,2,31,39,17,0,5,6,8,0,0,7,3,5,2,9,0,14,14,0,2,2,0,1,0,6,6,0,2,6,2,45,4,24,28,3,15,0,0,0,0,70,7,0,4,8,144,59,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09330896397922292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09228117118440296,0.0,0.20967040231599327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09363171481290264,0.1367182746224232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11561079722578214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10969385092177053,0.3171451380963128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538571623005984,0.0,0.0,0.08663862215401517,0.0,0.0585882080410925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968812219302259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383978763418279,0.0,0.0,0.22549402777673536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11704439871767278,0.11128105096263896,0.09967465108513968,0.0,0.0,0.06162888146153756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5650506979265708,0.0,0.0,0.13133630978868202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08314994407916322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598855953209635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11072412875862116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667024892609694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266856026247995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09501534959087084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08955466958041694,0.0,0.1284553036541985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.180266803676648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07185439943645197,0.0,0.0,0.13077877171300634,0.0,0.0,0.10715400218967368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06614272346603056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34164901178568624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Ewstinkystinky,2020/04/19,"I try but I am not able to be grateful I have never been a kind of kid who would make unnecessary demands or would want all the fancy things in life like other kids because I was always aware my parents couldn't afford everything and I didn't want to be a burden, this feeling of not being a burden always triggers my anxieties and inferiority complexes. I underachieve things in so many cases. I didn't go to a regular government college because I didn't score extraordinarily and didn't opt for a private college because of the same reason that I didn't want to be a burden. I opted for weekend college and started taking up tuitions to earn some pocket money after my high school was over, so that I don't have to ask my parents for money. I don't live an extraordinary life nor do I wish for. A basic life with some privacy. I am not an ungrateful child, but I feel really bad for a reason when I see other kids' parents. I don't invite my friends over to my house because I don't have the kind of house I would want my friends to come to. There's no privacy at my place. I have had my anxiety troubles and there are times when I need some space and not get irritated. Where I want to have my own space to do things that I want to without disturbing someone else. It really disturbs my peace knowing how limited I am becoming by all these factors. I don't like to limited but when the situations like this arise, I just can't keep up with my spirit and can't help and be ungrateful about my life.",7.230198019801983,5.9045850891089104,8.138165016501652,72.6943762376238,64.44554455445544,11.116303630363037,35.711551155115515,10.203070172399654,3.468545610561056,1194,47,233,23,15,407,141,303,0.16699999999999998,0.693,0.14,-0.9088,4,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,0,3,11,15,0,2,14,0,36,4,0,5,3,52,56,19,0,12,10,3,2,3,2,3,4,0,0,4,13,11,0,3,6,1,3,2,21,8,0,0,9,3,39,7,35,38,7,22,1,1,1,0,12,12,0,4,11,173,52,6,0.10324883800907488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17182260863102736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1579701569448903,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0965237259698674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08620846703073276,0.2517581333170599,0.11403022973179892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08893973166791093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08625115555506019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09279339807904946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10441142955571306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15953959225198955,0.0,0.05394325642110555,0.0,0.0586786940109629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920551972538484,0.10908806611115487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23827059321625224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09177231122001142,0.0,0.21503555285438128,0.05674286117940205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2917108308668316,0.1513265008529397,0.0,0.09117061556841438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06891940111142401,0.10467811619527756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.076557705122453,0.07963186896156024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3439368477986713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787306032451544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13228769893241854,0.21231400308603288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449333625756914,0.0822759562211123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11605601987893265,0.0,0.0,0.08748240538994571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07308005896167599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0776302767063918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20578182048096308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06020522774825236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07009918357643648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3653930384574189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1187310682249036,0.09952819539737172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220035036503295,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DrAwesome3,2020/04/19,"Research about choosing a psychologist Dear friends,  
I'm a psychologist doing a research and I ask you to fill in a super brief questionnaire, Thanks so much.

At the Miguel Hernández Universtity of Elche, we are working on a project to assess preferences in the realm of psychological attention. We only ask you to fill in this brief questionnaire, which will not take you more than 3 minutes.

We appreciate your time and thank the sharing.

[https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeT01FbsXrUP3ycWKD-1a7hpURNTmV2UXIhRRok-JUmMW8mHg/viewform?usp=sf\_link](https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSeT01FbsXrUP3ycWKD-1a7hpURNTmV2UXIhRRok-JUmMW8mHg/viewform?usp=sf_link)",19.285274725274718,25.41666166666668,11.296739926739928,33.9173076923077,41.30769230769232,9.585347985347983,35.50183150183151,9.957137785484203,4.238598534798535,582,19,57,10,7,149,55,78,0.0,0.7509999999999999,0.249,0.9631,0,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,3,4,0,2,2,6,0,0,8,0,3,0,0,0,0,9,9,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,4,1,0,0,0,0,0,8,6,12,8,2,10,0,0,0,0,11,5,0,0,1,39,10,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5901563850405342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2438605329628168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23202967415830664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24005632873435864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373199076724551,0.0,0.0,0.581192689390844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18405060109025687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2297876551576299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dyooppa,2020/04/19,"TRIGGER WARNING: I (23f) relapsed self harm after 6 years and I’m scared I’ll do it again. I’ve been going through a lot of stuff recently. Not anything particularly bad, I just get overwhelmed by general things in life. Yesterday an accumulation of things (many of which have been ongoing issues) caused a meltdown of such, several things went wrong and being stuck in uni halls with two particularly unpleasant teenage flatmates, miles away from home, friendship drama hitting that morning (causing early morning drinking; I don’t normally cope this way but Quarantine has left me doing this one or two times) relationship problems  and just in general feeling overwhelmed. I reverted back to 17 year old me and self harmed as a feeling of grounding and control. 
Except what it did was cause the opposite. I’m kind of glad. I’ve never harmed myself remotely deep, the wounds tend to be superficial, more like a cluster of scratches done with an instrument. I do it to feel, have something to focus on because it stings/itches and it helps to ground me. That and I know when I get better it’ll fade into something only I can see. 
The issue is, not only do I feel overwhelmingly guilty and upset at myself, but I now have to hide my leg. It’s a quite sizeable section. Being of around 8x4” section on my upper-mid thigh. And I’m scared that during quarantine things may only get worse and I’ll continue on doing it. 
My mental health has been suffering considerably for the last 5 months or so: and my studies have been majorly affected by this. But I’ve been through so many times of being brushed off by mh services or just given links to help etc I’ve learnt to cope very well by myself. I am high functioning, but moments like this scare me. And I can’t talk to anyone around me about this to save their freaking out because I’m already dealing with myself facing my actions.


Long story short; what advice do you have to keep my mental health above the water so I can make it through this very isolating and mentally damaging time without any more hiccups??",5.3691777877295115,7.139360488311695,5.678495297805643,77.99636363636365,68.79220779220779,8.323331840573221,31.71742051052396,8.841846274778883,2.7819708911777887,1648,71,284,29,29,525,219,385,0.151,0.7559999999999999,0.094,-0.9773,0,2,3,0,0,0,42.0,0,1,1,3,15,23,0,7,12,0,33,10,3,7,1,57,54,25,0,2,14,0,5,2,0,2,5,0,1,2,26,20,2,2,7,2,0,3,6,16,1,3,11,7,30,7,50,36,7,48,0,5,1,0,9,23,0,5,23,194,56,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08798409476808405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09935917558286816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061228929781486516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06295666539808348,0.0,0.07409360498420796,0.160305824211759,0.0,0.0,0.0845936679740353,0.06923366682659575,0.07517797186901956,0.10977266222330324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07963129706175502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2774814945083969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10098527679237608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282522785107727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09214013790715153,0.0,0.08820296541216778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10041617415537872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1821036792394241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1411234216345644,0.0,0.05117067220432489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19141237429083388,0.0,0.0,0.12070115139017888,0.09513009392020087,0.09031545856408099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18795256568367305,0.0,0.0800299143330479,0.0,0.0937607250199838,0.04948253191872713,0.07339298990506662,0.0,0.0,0.09782655403755533,0.0,0.063596504473792,0.08797604083833857,0.0,0.0,0.07968079959340592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0765470906196847,0.0,0.0,0.060101066362045825,0.18256880665387806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2722113904984673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0718674752246811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06944285881496369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08821812635981839,0.0,0.0,0.09447973844525727,0.0,0.061012081240704126,0.20543387634177498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08615420926407734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09576649951081312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08890166599715266,0.09666711976652342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2704312456922559,0.0,0.07174863137378876,0.0,0.1878585480101157,0.1017173154349251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1386313076046966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307197237964576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07236913647689389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392689943979389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15750565137920286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17590809238907928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14858156453683036,0.0,0.07146797609871622,0.0,0.0,0.08095497809989005,0.08346613111506276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679342217151934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09175641752870664,0.0,0.09844242221048848,0.0,0.11596304423190006
mentalhealth,maithwho,2020/04/19,"Does OCD ever go away/become more manageable ? I'm a 20 year old girl dating a 20 year old boy, who probably has OCD, Pure O to be exact. He hasn't been tested yet, but he has a minor hoarding problem, worries about saying prayers ""just right"" and a series of other minor OCD rituals. He has struggled from thinking he might be gay and might not be in the right relationship (he is over them now). Currently he gets random inappropriate sexual thoughts. For context, this guy is the sweetest, the kinda guy that won't even kill a fly, puts my needs first and hates violent or scary movies. These thoughts scare him to no end and he is disgusted. He freaks out that these thoughts must reflect him as a person and he really is a monster, even though such thoughts never occurred to him until he was 19 and in the midst of OCD. 

I'm getting frustrated. I know for sure he is no harm, this is the opposite of him, but I'm getting so frustrated. We've been together 2 years, I want to marry him but I know I can't be with him if he is thinking weird thoughts. I know these don't reflect who he really is, but it scares me to think hes thinking these things nonetheless. Is it possible for this to go away?",5.017499999999998,5.379407416666666,5.793333333333332,82.025,68.58333333333334,9.233333333333333,30.583333333333336,9.21078282632365,2.446283333333333,940,35,192,17,15,308,133,240,0.223,0.741,0.036000000000000004,-0.9945,1,0,0,0,0,0,30.0,0,0,1,1,10,14,6,3,12,0,27,1,0,0,6,43,50,16,1,5,8,0,0,0,0,4,0,1,0,5,15,8,0,0,14,0,0,3,8,13,0,1,8,1,15,1,22,34,1,24,1,0,0,1,30,7,0,6,14,117,30,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.212048840152996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12463176097090703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875405397576686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09994984175098344,0.0,0.0,0.1490700925528874,0.10207748566944708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09598845961426228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17687528270565495,0.0,0.12826824927495387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234745435768964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141404682906378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12484960318499873,0.0,0.18605494511279969,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23942781066569066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08367536948530728,0.08703534213187797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2368300067260879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09853452953688842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12721917549253092,0.0,0.0,0.12166924120290225,0.10798030506463824,0.0,0.11344341882832655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14458664962365506,0.0,0.0,0.12115653049654752,0.0,0.19274316781094195,0.0,0.08974126689897889,0.22596108890708694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11797324192860968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635791387567547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497120346263605,0.2892337926897848,0.11087259681433806,0.447943573272724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656068005909244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460263187605775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21801125561962076
mentalhealth,eightyhate,2020/04/19,"I just felt actually threatened by an extinct giant sloth lemur I was looking at pictures of extinct lemur fossils, and i was trying to perceive the size of the animal, as i often do with fossils, by picturing them in my mind inside my room of which i know the measures of the walls so i can make the comparison, but, i dont know how to explain this, my brain passed me this image of the animal actually opening my door and trying to attack me, it's not like an hallucination, it was inside my head i was just imagining it, but it felt so real and threatening that i jumped up grabbed my knife quickly switched it open and stood looking at the door, tense and serious, like it was an actual possible scenario that could have happened, I started laughing out loud as soon as i realized how stupid that was, but now I feel concerned because it isn't the first time in the last few months that i had absolutely weird paranoias and i had to stop for a second to realize how stupid what i was thinking was. I never really had mental problems before and i'm in my early 20s so i was a bit concerned",10.975416666666668,6.70443941203704,10.837222222222225,65.45500000000001,59.97222222222222,13.762962962962966,44.12962962962963,11.20814326018867,4.826807407407409,867,37,163,16,8,291,119,216,0.19,0.7909999999999999,0.019,-0.9897,0,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,1,12,9,3,0,14,0,18,2,2,4,1,39,32,19,0,2,6,0,4,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,15,11,0,1,11,0,0,2,4,6,0,2,15,7,27,3,24,16,2,25,0,0,2,0,2,12,0,1,13,125,42,0,0.0,0.0,0.4690315544241892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18226433763373268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09766377960800128,0.0,0.13632865571847688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17491006576660426,0.0,0.0,0.17884963486872216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279162866124703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18776733125338024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08100802711182574,0.0,0.30765738824097705,0.0,0.0,0.13627628922865356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14167498810280155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16442378609795782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17609670728129792,0.1305942052544856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15654303155628554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26907554578003035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694278849588923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614560657148522,0.0,0.1617685007726689,0.0,0.12787973105815306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1235654109373404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18061501585212436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15330129625083036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18235638957862726,0.10263594270548934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1133989147144542,0.0,0.0,0.1339444489407528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10265741357265466,0.0,0.0,0.09342093566685028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21754693285362076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,JamesCullen18,2020/04/19,"Why don't parents try and understand? WARNING: RANT INCOMING. I discuss a few issues in this piece. 

I'm a 20 year old man living in Ireland and I've been dealing with mental health issues since 2018 and it makes me feels like every decision I make is the wrong one. I have bad depression and it's been really bad since lockdown began and it gets worse every day. Once lockdown is over I'm going to go back to the doctor and discuss it again and also talk about me possibly having ADHD. 


I have been debating dropping out of college due to my mental health. I feel guilty about discussing this with my parents as my college fees for the year are paid for and I duno what their reaction will be. 

Today my sister gave out to me for eating junk food my family bought the previous day. I struggle with binge eating and emotional eating and find it extremely hard to stop and think if I actually need to eat something or am I reaching for food out of anxiety or out of comfort. I'll literally eat a full packet of any form of junk food and not bat an eyelid.
My sister gave out to me saying I was a fat shit and that I was a selfish prick. My sister is 12 so I didn't really expect that!
This upset me and I told her that I struggle with binge eating and you don't realise how hard that is for me.

My family were in the room at the time and they all laughed and joked that I have no willpower to stop myself or motivate myself to not eat junk food. My dad scoffed when I told him I think Its something I want to look into.

When I went for counselling last year, I felt like my parents cared more about the cost of counselling rather than whether I was improving or not. After a few weeks my mam said to me ""surely you must be better at this stage, sure you look happy a good bit of the time.""

They always make sure to point out that I can't be a responsible functional adult and always say ""an adult would do X or act in X way"" 

I needed to get that off my chest. I don't feel like they understand or listen anymore in the last few years. Yet if it's my sister they'll listen and try to understand her more. I try show my love by doing odd jobs and buying them gifts sometimes when I get paid from work. But no matter what they still find a way to be disappointed in me 😔",4.3377610872675225,4.7665698862660975,5.331948497854079,84.5017138769671,70.09442060085837,8.273419170243205,26.26294706723891,8.238735603445708,1.4929673247496424,1781,50,373,24,30,587,223,466,0.132,0.764,0.10400000000000001,-0.9304,5,2,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,3,7,3,14,25,2,3,20,0,32,19,4,5,5,75,70,37,0,9,14,8,6,3,0,4,4,5,1,4,20,31,12,2,13,2,6,4,10,11,0,1,19,13,63,14,57,43,10,53,0,2,2,1,40,20,2,8,28,247,83,6,0.0,0.0,0.06448323191347889,0.0,0.07941369808667145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052843073738819066,0.10996546301310048,0.0,0.0,0.044935748960168255,0.0,0.0505499875397659,0.0,0.0655322664343797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05081040421928972,0.11034582780711276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058441197435751324,0.07214077322799485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673715891254965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08523052734673335,0.06812418820274144,0.05691344571938475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06763429981247783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4733046993356381,0.0,0.07432958900517038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11134822769173557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458614358809204,0.0,0.10023405493402902,0.09441320368346433,0.06344586796572785,0.0,0.12078938072848013,0.0,0.31961027079000365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10357010435430164,0.0,0.07510804087226948,0.055423637806024786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0703419532597025,0.11838698516577355,0.0,0.0,0.14047703315571256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1379378888071759,0.06557286552027226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772584076122227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09684807409821224,0.0,0.05834865990015978,0.0,0.11097884986915567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05963856287038598,0.0,0.13232403897576686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1331834777143314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097992965629911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06933842913390484,0.07037160728403725,0.04477660439197555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22011756786130815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06246568418444232,0.07449375107745558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08466335239549007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06285592944474692,0.10509679176690663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06782878619906083,0.10932188673368193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10174114848612127,0.06535347596992544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052770496452991415,0.1104894229366704,0.0,0.1381595075428901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868350411177721,0.0,0.0,0.05311151706873599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08468106349693404,0.0,0.0,0.07706198617159417,0.0,0.06263483525735944,0.1262819665120065,0.0,0.13458920057563106,0.0,0.0,0.20637061983149746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03897490069929983,0.1049003157208295,0.05300430843833718,0.0,0.0,0.06125557196325525,0.059625705110819126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048106045292067585,0.0,0.0673397911456071,0.046940378143422806,0.07224663222545724,0.0,0.1702099403944551
mentalhealth,anticorruptionbot,2020/04/19,"I used to be addicted to meth and after the damage was done suffered a huge dent in my personality. I feel like my life was pure trash for several years until maybe recently. I do not want to remember or be defined by my past as a meth head. Isn't that normal? Wouldn't it be more damaging to my mind to relive traumatizing moments or have my self esteem always on an extreme low because I'm constantly reviewing memories when I was a lot trashier and my IQ was probably a lot lower?

A minority of people seem to think I must be some kind of evil piece of shit trying to cover my old evil shitty ways up! & I'm a coward who can't own up to have intentionally evil I am. I've talked about almost every moment of my life with all types of people countless times while they've like interrogated me more or less and it's been a painful experience. I'm kind of about to run into some money or celebrity status at some point, if COVID 19 dies down at least so I feel like some of my previous acquaintances, who are meth people who probably are on a constant withdrawal stage like meth heads are - probably are FUCKING INSANELY PISSED!!! that I'm not still a loser meth head and they have to comprehend my existence as a success without becoming jealous or enraged.

In Oklahoma there are more prisoners per capita than any other state - or country (if OK was a country) in the entire world. So think about all those people who grew up in prison more or less and me moving to Cali to become a pornstar / EDM artist / movie director. The fact that I got it is BURNING THEM THE FUCK UP evidently.",6.767624434389143,6.332620679487183,7.5657239819004545,73.50868778280545,64.96153846153845,10.930920060331824,33.41704374057315,10.46071229359064,3.3790604826546002,1260,47,239,28,17,423,178,312,0.201,0.726,0.073,-0.9938,1,0,5,0,0,0,25.0,0,0,2,2,8,23,9,0,17,1,26,11,5,2,5,43,40,21,1,6,12,0,2,4,0,2,4,0,0,2,12,7,0,0,6,1,1,3,6,15,0,0,8,2,22,8,45,26,17,38,0,5,0,2,9,18,4,17,18,161,34,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11604600542873715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065941080227908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08857476939575577,0.1153383246077056,0.0,0.07238952108623971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0648908161147477,0.2351309035082423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23006885513856384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11047809647163108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10893511416453908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968855602641912,0.0,0.0,0.1041283402491932,0.0,0.0,0.10764844474033272,0.1520955309974207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19682226798072744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08513763739306174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3277446473420857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22170219225185547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15037729772662822,0.20802400061797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18099964347831654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10694314192276017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748396262085344,0.0,0.0,0.1131393015084518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1042982123173343,0.0,0.0,0.11170116875819283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11327010305756488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10161838864534373,0.2951955797560372,0.09294786808868256,0.0,0.0,0.10062947802303966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3443126983483614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10510634512590496,0.0,0.1205868835242704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969079090041791,0.11105036761985433,0.12025798551093735,0.10926920018988316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0850109557337365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08556032499152205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1364174799233959,0.0,0.0,0.062071740229154536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07227243340772325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09193845764002632,0.0,0.0,0.0627868559286054,0.084494904308342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10261381812248896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06855018751436584
mentalhealth,Stormy_whether,2020/04/19,"Advice needed: ""being present"" Hi folks, first time posting here and hopefully not the last.

​

**TL;DR: I'm struggling with being ""present"" and don't even really understand the meaning of it. Wondering how to be better at it. More info below:**

​

I just got out of a treatment program where I was diagnosed with a list of things, all stemming from childhood trauma -- the primary diagnoses I got were PTSD/BPD and a slew of others.

​

Anyway, I've been working with therapists during this isolation and she has been trying to get me to squish some of my core beliefs about myself, and that has been really hard to do so instead, during my last appointment with her 2 weeks ago, she suggested that my primary focus right now should be ""being present""

​

She suggested that I try to focus on my body, how things feel, like my breath, my feet during a walk, etc...

​

Here is my problem: I have no clue how to be present. I don't even think I fully understand what being present means other than living in the moment? For example, if I'm watching a TV show and focused on it, is that being present? Or does external stimulus have to be gone and it's just me living in the moment?

​

Also, I have found it nearly IMPOSSIBLE to be ""present"" for more than 2-3 seconds. For example, today I was on a walk and I kept trying to focus on my feet hitting the ground and other parts of my body, but my mind would just drift off into some thoughts about the past or some about the future, and during a 40-minute walk I can at best say 2-3 minutes of it were devoted to me living in the moment.

​

Furthermore, I've been doing this for a couple of months now and I don't feel like I'm making any progress in being present, how long does it take to become better at this, how much do I need to practice to become better, and more important: what is the BEST thing to do to become more present?

​

Any help would be much appreciated. Thank you.",6.265816933638444,6.6705089684210535,6.472951945080094,78.08175057208237,65.89473684210526,9.135011441647595,32.048054919908466,8.964715089967882,2.6794084668192224,1568,59,284,24,23,503,176,380,0.027000000000000003,0.836,0.136,0.9934,0,1,0,0,0,0,92.0,0,1,0,8,22,13,0,1,18,0,39,7,5,6,1,57,64,23,0,8,8,0,3,2,0,3,2,1,0,0,22,18,0,1,12,2,0,5,5,3,0,2,14,5,32,10,53,34,14,51,1,0,1,0,10,19,0,8,28,217,54,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05062254528009005,0.04592137072776313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04142786598359485,0.0,0.44903934739553736,0.50358298780448,0.07045737706308962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1716412798331209,0.0,0.0,0.10873079678689923,0.13745003407195175,0.0,0.11508575879351825,0.06524568028979942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05732045323190276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10516051249304488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09066855340384948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05777546880982432,0.0684324800016054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052387603533728365,0.07401797951066376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044064696214013856,0.0,0.05680072184706285,0.0,0.0,0.02706559945335502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286523422246814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04640646170480605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034723318559531216,0.0,0.0,0.05145334143485998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0844548088948039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05061791136955999,0.0,0.13723239158723066,0.04584515980988605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034579760822839166,0.0,0.0,0.11286010113499514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052307557564792585,0.0,0.04134968403456124,0.0,0.0761642166011826,0.07682443809979808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05609898963632767,0.04945304940475386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04961418259036946,0.0,0.0,0.049569702013041256,0.060556433988445686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637429976344543,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0442405741848883,0.0,0.04119684470045065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054157083964645095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03895037330312613,0.0,0.0,0.04769442318354796,0.0,0.06014876477503504,0.10324939014510108,0.03319409244850704,0.0,0.04112681369531974,0.030207493713610287,0.0,0.049104402476123216,0.0,0.0,0.10551512184633598,0.0,0.0,0.10786017007750416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04155427062001997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05617953452778348,0.037714134632113434,0.0,0.0,0.07360055187389421,0.0,0.50358298780448,0.0
mentalhealth,futurenp97,2020/04/19,"Kids with depression Hi all! I need some advice.
I am looking after a family friends girls (aged 5, 8, 10) while there father battles stage 4 cancer. 
They spend the day with me while their mom is in the hospital.
Their behavior is concerning. Earlier, they were very happy and playful all the time. Now they say they miss Papa (except they can’t see him because of the covid-19) 
The youngest just sits around sad all day. Does not want to watch anything, eat, play or talk. If I ask her whats wrong she just shrugs her shoulders.

I have two questions:
1) How can I make her happier?
2) In the case that their dad passes away (which doctors said is very likely in the next few weeks) how do I communicate with them? Is there anything I can do or say at that time that will help them grieve? Or is there anything I can say now to prepars them? I ask because their mom is torn between running their business, looking after her husband, and coming home to her girls. So shes very overwhelmed mentally.

Thank you in advance",2.128882189239332,4.727570413265309,2.574341372912801,92.47390538033396,82.11224489795919,5.400371057513915,24.215213358070503,6.782984794422108,0.8523040816326528,795,30,158,9,22,244,124,196,0.12,0.772,0.109,-0.3175,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,1,13,1,11,13,1,1,8,0,17,4,1,3,3,25,29,11,1,3,8,5,0,1,1,1,2,4,1,3,5,7,1,0,1,2,1,4,2,7,0,1,2,8,32,6,18,26,5,26,0,5,4,0,41,7,0,6,14,104,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304823942761417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3296474551806308,0.11886857400019647,0.24966203348261576,0.0,0.125454314975314,0.0,0.0,0.16279533057329978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11502288190025277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17222952604128836,0.0,0.11500780397320773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13667196207115706,0.1168515912053667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13663287519382614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587867944425782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10316370048503268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14214345080197785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08950126307937321,0.0,0.1339398592967484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06523522505846208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242604300195564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913123511857428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345652077802669,0.0,0.0,0.3127736658083762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900960695197844,0.0,0.0,0.1420089543113373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14958235273142795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1270160736318422,0.31856139809220696,0.0,0.0,0.10640483637827078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073250594223009,0.0,0.12293499855007267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15572295241280915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13043783156476765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33052471024160657,0.07875850219298174,0.0,0.10710841766052924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14599232943437462,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dejushin,2020/04/19,"Is this really reason enough to go to the psychologist? I (17) often tell myself to die out loud. I otherwise feel pretty good. After years of bullying in primary school, I finally feel included and have lots of friends that care about me. My life seems happy, and I don't have any reason to do this. I don't think this is related. I just think it's a weird quirk I developed for some strange reason, but my girlfriend keeps insisting I should tell my mother and go to the psychologist. She wanted to tell my mother about it, but I asked her to give me a chance to stop doing it. She gave me three days to try not saying it for a whole day. This is my second day. I failed yesterday after my brother smashed a plate to the floor and today in the shower. I felt good today, so I don't know why I said it.

I don't think it's related (everyone has problems, mine are not that big) but I'll include a little bit of background anyways. My mother divorced my father two years ago, after eighteen years of abuse and violence. He was pretty violent, but since my mother reported him eight years ago, he calmed down a little bit, but he continued being pretty aggressive. After the report, while we were at school, and my mother at her job, he would clean the house. It was very gross. He used the same dishwashing sponge to clean everything, from the floor to the dishes. And when my mother would throw it away, he'd just take it from the trash and continue to use it. We had to hide a clean sponge and clean everything again. When my mother arrived from work, he would usually go downstairs and spend the rest of the day in his room listening to the radio. My brother could be having another anger attack, breaking stuff and hurt my mother and he would just stay in his room.

Any conversation we had with him felt distant and disconnected. He doesn't really know us. After he left, after some time, he started to message me on WhatsApp. Usually once a month, and every time I forced myself to answer because I felt guilty. But for some reason, every time he answered, I got very anxious, and sometimes I didn't even open his messages.  I don't know why usually his messages were ok.

My brother started to have anger attacks about four years ago. He gets angry for very insignificant things and starts throwing dishes, food to the floor. Once he threw the TV on the floor or our Christmas dinner. Every time he does it I start repeating myself I wanna kill myself. He also constantly tells everyone about their weird physical traits and reminds them constantly. Every time he sees my feet he says they're so ugly and weird, my nose, he constantly says it's so weird because it has hair. Things like that, all the time. I feel so insecure around him.

I don't know what's the point of this post. I got a little bit carried away writing some things. I guess what I want to know is if my girlfriend is right. Is telling myself to die, out loud (sometimes I even do it in front of people without even realizing it, lucky I say it in my mother tongue and they don't understand it) enough reason to go to the psychologist?",4.007405019412094,5.776244181364392,4.705770590682196,83.62552221991128,72.24459234608986,7.80367443150305,25.499202717692732,8.472884824447931,1.7185498890737667,2447,78,466,42,48,785,258,601,0.171,0.748,0.081,-0.9968,2,0,0,0,2,1,75.0,5,0,3,2,21,25,7,1,28,1,40,8,3,7,1,90,82,35,3,11,14,13,7,1,3,5,1,8,7,0,31,27,4,2,24,2,1,8,12,16,0,5,15,17,77,9,66,58,14,88,0,2,1,0,74,30,0,11,48,303,108,7,0.0,0.06721812826579866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15086845163318585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045368549881093206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07715939380135066,0.05948843541283209,0.0,0.0640909977201062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05050349672592673,0.05303675002678443,0.12908165167992505,0.10660313945717358,0.0,0.0,0.06916658598589072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18580991057588284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05784204221192438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839213721338953,0.0,0.0452958756689999,0.0,0.0,0.14634975438537254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11775769233122567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04964654454296567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723861694029356,0.0,0.11241282801059004,0.0,0.19119658508785006,0.10841969044230212,0.10197410447232046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08605619240725794,0.0,0.163414814197561,0.062147119233055825,0.0,0.0,0.06860054443707518,0.0,0.043830992787645635,0.0,0.029640121925360027,0.054422491853580085,0.12896838346788025,0.09516819891372476,0.09074750588696133,0.0,0.06249668021632245,0.0,0.0,0.06039225558622205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0654610965551052,0.060732765942880525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05629774367226604,0.05042599713852195,0.06276553858960192,0.0,0.15589208321257533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06163947037904266,0.0,0.04007148051252076,0.027716383433267117,0.17058106641106327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04823150698983632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045282931141862534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12083543024232472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039330816886602726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05363006555571763,0.0,0.054333561824116014,0.17315048031644314,0.0,0.05428485018417651,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0726879277545448,0.29164965907903123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04844880731897026,0.0539651115760437,0.18046221395774265,0.0,0.11483160018682892,0.045208048896455036,0.0516466706860163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04692928628533552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1122187724771307,0.0,0.16062077090986146,0.060468750209280914,0.0,0.04743048181310771,0.0,0.0,0.06494455264125593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0426553941926395,0.0,0.2479312880510104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11307063484383705,0.10905470049584963,0.0,0.0,0.19848526871330052,0.0,0.1075505812441058,0.0,0.0,0.03851729550500112,0.0,0.0554189082755997,0.0590599997147116,0.06824159569807896,0.0979964441273814,0.18744680748204806,0.14042949334529128,0.06692399216693845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1023835891865743,0.06333923799144091,0.0,0.0546876114330195,0.0,0.04130156255108245,0.0,0.0,0.16120310470681926,0.0,0.0,0.18266769948913256
mentalhealth,pau-illus,2020/04/19,"Gift , relaxing coloring page for adults Hi all! I created some pages for adults to color. Coloring can be very relaxing and calming and it can be helpful during these troubled times. I hope you have fun while doing it. Stay safe, stay home. You can free download it following this link

[http://www.romaniillustrations.com/portfolio/gift-colouring-book-page-illustration-by-paula-romani/](http://www.romaniillustrations.com/portfolio/gift-colouring-book-page-illustration-by-paula-romani/)",19.461048218029347,26.546570660377363,10.751949685534594,28.465324947589124,59.377358490566046,7.638574423480084,26.643605870020966,8.167268648758528,2.9509429769392046,427,11,39,7,9,108,40,53,0.040999999999999995,0.55,0.409,0.977,0,0,0,0,0,0,41.0,0,2,0,0,0,8,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,0,1,7,9,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,5,2,0,1,1,2,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,3,4,8,3,7,4,5,0,0,3,0,6,0,0,2,2,24,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23687509794342276,0.0,0.3544868105527045,0.3510037576334516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.7533500735254065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20606910079084803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2915901981620402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,QuaranTinaBelcher,2020/04/19,"Where do I go from here? 27/f

TW: discussions of assault, depression, disordered eating, guilt and grief

Hi.

This is my first post, and I’m not sure what I’m even asking. I guess I just want to put it out there and see if anyone can relate or offer advice. 

Quarantine has allowed me time to experience my emotions and process traumas that I’ve yet to overcome. My partner is overwhelmingly supportive-encourages me to speak to my therapist, listens without judgement, respects my need for physical space when triggered- but I’m not sure what the next step is. 

In college, I was assaulted by my best friends boyfriend. I’m not going to describe the night. I don’t blame myself for his actions, but there’s a part of me that feels unclean. Following that event, I coped by finding every possible distraction. I fell into heavy drinking, I withdrew into myself and became a puppet that blended in with my peers, I resented my family and my southern/Christian upbringing that fueled my self-loathing (that’s a whole different post). My only grandparent died in front of me and I stopped existing in this world. I stopped eating and found relief only when alcohol flooded my veins. This went on for 3 years. 

Eventually, I found myself again. I went to rehab, I surrounded myself with friends who loved me fiercely and without stipulations, I moved and found a partner who loved me for ME.  

But now, as I’m here in quarantine the whispers of my past have been creeping up my spine. The tendrils of pain wrap around my throat and it is unbearable. 

How can I move forward? I don’t need to forget, I just need to scrub off the guilt and learn to breathe again. 

Thanks for reading.",5.41539715719064,7.063986189102567,5.6228706800445964,78.91053511705688,68.51923076923077,8.759420289855072,33.75752508361204,9.20300075937882,3.182527424749164,1329,63,233,26,23,421,177,312,0.153,0.745,0.102,-0.8448,3,2,2,0,0,0,45.0,0,0,0,2,16,21,3,4,9,0,13,12,4,3,2,49,38,21,2,5,12,0,1,0,4,0,3,3,0,2,15,18,4,2,6,2,0,13,7,11,0,1,7,5,45,10,40,31,3,46,0,3,1,2,15,17,0,3,16,161,60,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10693927482560177,0.0,0.11695345481660567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07651996830626383,0.0,0.0,0.09742095225684172,0.10230758318096644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1148459890278772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09425678632284727,0.0,0.11357695274777713,0.11433698793995008,0.12542276435012714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10720529867935197,0.0,0.22396003187437494,0.0,0.12310040447857,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07228123107400736,0.0,0.0922042759167624,0.0,0.0,0.10704908898592347,0.10316621464873507,0.0,0.05533396533847773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10002222414654807,0.0930859290552192,0.0,0.3599717064968259,0.16909946172274054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12438963183727812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205557336476434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19753993827019448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23262560655435635,0.0,0.2434354985655353,0.0,0.0,0.11638608163992895,0.10269796739693723,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16646152404787398,0.11644727374541955,0.0,0.0,0.1185081713486525,0.1044687344739065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337228029234508,0.209618251232652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001307948133884,0.0,0.0,0.10946528961908047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08720606410814212,0.0,0.11416527582028188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18298624862787566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20628365670785706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10075366618280236,0.0,0.12706325316336414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06381282201752347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06454799636067103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2028959338041907,0.0,0.12218102270889185,0.0,0.21098417051672536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07047298656317483
mentalhealth,luckis4losersz,2020/04/19,"Psychology of Loneliness: Seeking Solitude in Isolation (2020) Hey guys I'm a PhD student in Psychology and I recently made a video on loneliness, isolation and solitude by delving into research on its mental health implications and effects. Here it is below: [https://youtu.be/uq65-IJEYvY](https://youtu.be/uq65-IJEYvY)",11.87227272727273,16.91790895454546,9.028363636363636,46.007545454545486,61.72727272727273,11.701818181818185,45.16363636363637,10.793553405168565,7.412723636363637,270,16,25,9,5,79,34,44,0.23399999999999999,0.7659999999999999,0.0,-0.875,0,2,0,0,0,0,22.0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,1,0,2,0,6,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,0,8,2,0,7,0,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,1,18,3,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4429832829046277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.47555126144708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4233282198021609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4508606809823118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4417405046703654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,axolotl-bby,2020/04/19,"i don’t know what the hell is going on with me. please, help i need advice with a problem that is going on for a long time; i don’t really know when exactly it has begun, i think a year ago more or less, and it’s about a lot of bad thoughts that are against me. 
they started as little thoughts when i was in middle school (11-14 years old) and they exploded two years ago with the sudden death of my father when i was 18 years old. 
those thoughts are recurrent and they pop up every time i make a mistake, regardless of whether it is big or small; i start to panic and those thoughts start blame myself in a hard way, saying that i don’t deserve anything because of what i’ve done and making me feel guilty, followed by other thoughts like “you are useless”, “you are stupid”, “you can’t do anything”... 
these situations last from 30 minutes to a maximum of several hours like for 5/6 hours (in particular cases also half a day) and the only way i‘ve found to get rid of them as fast as possible is to cry for 20 minutes more or less, until the panic isn’t gone. most of the times i also have to continue to cry a little bit later in the day because of the remaining sadness.

these situations happen also if there’s no reason to feel guilty but they are more powerful if i do something “wrong” (‘cause my thoughts try to make me believe i did something wrong and it IS my fault but i don’t believe any of this) against my friends, my boyfriend or a family member (sometimes also with strangers, but it’s more rare) and they happen at least once or twice a week. 
this is why i try to make everything perfect but if i can’t do it, thoughts come and it’s the same story as usual. 
i have to say that i don’t EVER believe what my thoughts say and i always feel bad they pop up in my mind (and this is why i also cry) ‘cause i don’t want them and the random-guilt is too much for me. 

so i’ve tried to improve myself with this problem, i try to control those thoughts and to not cry when they appear. but every time, the same thoughts always try to stop me from doing it and it can finish in two ways: i can control them and belittle them, or they control me and they take me down. obviously, in the second ending i cry every time and i continue until thoughts aren’t gone. 
i also hurt me physically BUT lightly and it doesn’t happen a lot, like i bite my hand/fingers or i scratch my skin while i’m crying. 

this situation has worried me when i found that i often don’t notice when i have those toxic thoughts against me and i go along with them, like if i’m used to them. 
it worried me also when the other day during a crisis the thought “are you sure you want to continue with this life?” appeared in my mind for the first time in my life. i think that it’s the worst thought i’ve ever had and i hope that it never reappears in my mind. 

i’m not looking for a diagnosis, but for some clarity to understand what the hell is going on with me and how i can improve more myself to... you know, live happily or at least survive. 

thanks for reading this far. 

P.S. i can’t go to therapy atm and for the next months but i will in the future.",4.231621100397053,4.534263297674421,5.181024768387218,85.9370845150312,70.28682170542635,7.967101531480432,28.44488561164681,7.765008861874849,1.5576825486859525,2437,82,524,27,41,800,244,645,0.126,0.8009999999999999,0.073,-0.9792,4,0,2,1,0,0,64.0,0,6,15,7,22,26,3,2,32,0,46,3,1,12,7,120,104,66,1,12,23,1,6,4,1,1,2,3,0,0,39,32,0,4,26,1,1,11,17,17,0,6,23,11,85,9,78,80,18,92,2,3,1,0,27,25,2,20,57,372,124,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04661265589321908,0.08456773716275527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2670241086376658,0.07938175016392432,0.0,0.0,0.032438170127651295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07850736481680111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07965632749231549,0.058155912658812786,0.0,0.0,0.16122735294027574,0.0,0.0,0.0520769037850982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09800369376873544,0.0,0.04109000331888605,0.0,0.0,0.16050146233175866,0.0,0.0,0.3143824405931704,0.09228918211400454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048814465313766736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042248737945812485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08629618349892919,0.12056990826430793,0.0,0.042870390583992835,0.0,0.044968055665889024,0.0,0.07235685176665195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0405742641010762,0.0,0.10460289925346412,0.0368535088435238,0.0,0.024921691844663644,0.0,0.13554727940157946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12654494225671745,0.0,0.04273053475876363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03197283128556229,0.0,0.0,0.0473776434114372,0.09395133099925397,0.0,0.05106467785503778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864531330802091,0.03888250703080876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06738495149293193,0.09321677808368646,0.0956174377945306,0.042120667850436576,0.04221369444709308,0.04005664638880055,0.0,0.0,0.08110700471687356,0.0,0.0,0.12736257990874011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14449258731808806,0.0,0.038074312196909536,0.0,0.03506556614414088,0.03536952831512611,0.03678978673037935,0.0,0.05073032693637946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054307660882398814,0.10010790128916884,0.05079978017634265,0.0,0.03627859714103265,0.0,0.11193318904206136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05236113861844297,0.0,0.05377546890426553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09128641990951236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04771369438952105,0.0,0.030558344882785693,0.04904435243871244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1138007385020058,0.0,0.04827574193338967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053888310554853616,0.0,0.0,0.16085304573914933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07344479083904594,0.047177296940682255,0.0,0.10128858528015128,0.0,0.0,0.03987999289499671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04495742617573975,0.0,0.035865054545274264,0.0,0.0,0.04391647483507051,0.05455000581782676,0.0,0.0,0.061129475036432165,0.0,0.5301673406227989,0.16688827107508772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16192851225152755,0.0,0.09319347321783324,0.04965820035904212,0.0,0.041198163566355375,0.052535676529911916,0.0,0.0562703187928558,0.11358799062677935,0.03826269316542057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0860850797471019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09688492702359564,0.0,0.0,0.10430664232865436,0.0,0.1228709686985942
mentalhealth,Ashamed-agent,2020/04/19,"Help!!! looking for a long term psychiatric but too poor to afford the cost—how to help a severely mentally ill family, who has no job, no money, & about to become homeless? He’s in psych ward since last week for involuntary psychiatric hold, due to severe angry outbursts. He can be violent and unpredictable sometimes. He refused to take his medicine because of his paranoia. Most of the family gave up on him. He was living with us, but we cannot accommodate him anymore. Another thing, he’s not a citizen and he’s been in the US for about 9 years. He’s qualified to apply for citizenship. Is being noncitizen a problem? He need a place to stay when he get discharge, but we are poor and we cannot afford to pay for his housing. We’re barely making ends meet.",3.5764992150706436,5.742021605442178,5.115238095238095,78.52912087912087,74.4421768707483,8.604709576138147,28.314495028780733,9.265573868473778,2.7489794871794886,604,25,110,15,13,203,95,147,0.264,0.695,0.04,-0.9912,3,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,5,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,8,0,10,1,0,1,0,17,16,7,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,7,0,2,0,0,4,0,5,2,0,0,3,1,10,0,22,11,2,14,0,0,1,0,26,5,0,1,8,64,12,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17988374479667724,0.0,0.0,0.17408755284261054,0.0,0.0,0.1646482763484043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120489477661046,0.18335721272330255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147045377942413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130197521737571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08673914948567446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22256082850590808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19156600819281114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16475028059573524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353293191627869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1465996340813342,0.1469234101686009,0.13941587355582946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11082034404448823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16731017586358518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12310250936757483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17345666772361235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15885972894409867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3751130744960853,0.0,0.13733433312488935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1641990695163866,0.0,0.0,0.1769563558754159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482717252522865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11029701252981114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3994057774325253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13317207687529298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106912116840084
mentalhealth,Throwingaway_my_acct,2020/04/19,"How to bring up mental issues delicately with a psychiatrist? Hey everyone, first time post here and throwaway account for reasons which may be obvious soon.

Long story short, after being diagnosed with severe depression, psychosis, and ADD, I started a regiment of medicine which is working for me (60mg of Vyvanse and 300mg of wellbutrin daily, taken in the morning). 

However, there have always been other issues that I have dealt with for my entire life. I am scared to bring them up though because of how my psychiatrist may react. I would like to maybe give him small doses and work into the more extreme, but if I'm being completely honest I'm scared that they might consider me a danger to myself and/or others and want to commit me. 

The other half of this is I have no idea what psychiatrists deal with on a daily basis. Maybe my issues are tame compared to other people they interact with? I'm not sure.

Anyway, I'm wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation? I'd like to focus on bringing the issues up and not the issues themselves, but if it is entirely necessary I can explain below.",7.36517799352751,7.707647087378643,8.003058252427184,68.26034789644015,63.56310679611651,10.361812297734627,33.671521035598715,10.125756701596842,3.6043928802589,884,34,140,18,12,295,128,206,0.096,0.8290000000000001,0.07400000000000001,-0.6901,1,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,0,3,3,7,8,1,2,10,0,19,3,0,4,3,35,32,14,0,5,7,0,0,2,0,4,3,0,0,0,11,13,0,0,4,0,1,3,3,4,0,2,3,0,17,4,30,22,1,21,0,1,0,0,9,11,0,7,8,111,28,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10669859381133506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0896622054918698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07816852223208008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13444792690699678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13220069077334412,0.11044530638665444,0.13015192365087755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1225303643650006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10907335541417704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12301100896463416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14475736627967245,0.0,0.6692000545333306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09057345741928928,0.1252945308035386,0.0,0.0,0.11348053747328785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25765086240171026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12922684451689626,0.13603299184987067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08889933745850714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12281000066312045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13184298478660406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2567635136471668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1448647062378439,0.0,0.0,0.14413719152656798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907626719089658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085634656385605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12598645927459173,0.0,0.07477261801587731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07563405790518593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13906121823218595,0.1867076169497515,0.0,0.0,0.0910917337797026,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,green-egg-and-ham,2020/04/19,"I really need resources because of this quarantine!!! I am bipolar and am going through a pretty severe depressive episode, and I can’t go to group because of the quarantine. Does anyone know of any free na/alanon/ dbt/etc video group therapy programs?",7.317333333333334,8.751371844444446,7.042222222222224,71.29000000000002,63.88888888888889,10.444444444444443,41.66666666666667,10.504223727775694,4.989000000000001,203,12,31,5,3,64,36,45,0.11199999999999999,0.73,0.158,0.4898,0,2,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,3,1,0,0,0,4,7,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,2,1,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,5,7,0,2,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,16,4,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.201740913750302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20743356530007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3616858445961033,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2555152814807763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2596116627465686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33085750153909904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3372006730987829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16303814617679144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21997174726968388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30181277478043506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19004982078489466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.335144583341618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33925982801945065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gustav127,2020/04/19,"Finding and doing a hobby feels like a chore and i need help to get out of this circle of doing nothing Hey Guys, i need your help.

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After some deep reflection i noticed that i'm not looking forward to do anything in life. Like nothing. I just live. I don't feel bad but everything is mundane at this point. As a kid i was pumped to get out of school to pop in my newest game and play but nowadays i heavily neglet doing my household chores and i just vegetate through the days of worklife. I play games and talk to friends but more out of habit. Most of the stuff i could be interested in like hobbies or games feel like work, a hustle which needs a big time investment with very low outcome. Everything needs to have an endproduct to be usefull at this point. I haven't done something in forever just because i want to do it. X cost y amount of time and then i need to go to work and had no ""free time"" even tho said free time was filled with the hobby in theory.

​

My train of thought is just messed up at this point. I want to find something i'm looking forward to in life. Getting home from work, eating some healthy meal and then start doing my Hobby but at this point there is no way i will ever get to this point. How do i fix this ?",2.9088403361344533,4.567195054901962,3.5833613445378165,90.99941176470593,74.92156862745098,6.4257703081232505,25.86834733893557,7.07126945348624,1.014187675070028,989,35,209,10,21,312,132,255,0.045,0.7859999999999999,0.17,0.9835,0,0,2,0,0,0,28.0,0,1,0,3,9,14,0,0,9,0,21,5,0,1,1,43,43,18,0,8,10,0,3,4,1,1,2,1,3,2,11,13,3,0,7,5,4,4,5,3,0,0,6,6,21,13,41,33,5,38,0,1,2,0,12,24,0,4,17,134,32,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.203474789485946,0.2281903423976841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07726925663903424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07840009948479988,0.05723875907435109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496913943413447,0.0,0.0,0.060555817613750625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960892639009958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09608010496755584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06201810395053256,0.08493524098418019,0.0,0.0,0.16877719536148628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424314817290488,0.13416011658186414,0.0,0.0,0.17164037198350318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0725446138594565,0.0,0.1962292946673592,0.0,0.05336384703903393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09297282396824627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12587440232368866,0.0,0.09418637880755608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13264450087367965,0.1834933872922665,0.0,0.08291279936698089,0.0,0.1576997163075274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3481172966333207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18019346888899,0.10690239306796027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4438152263452134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08931757946103465,0.0,0.0,0.09502880912116868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445730449719015,0.0,0.0,0.06646080240480226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10748963676138823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07547087741742686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07454375486174662,0.21900845740756927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07747488494096451,0.11076580430667958,0.07453109330853946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20507447241110535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281903423976841,0.0
mentalhealth,katharjung,2020/04/19,"Is living out your delusion good or bad for you? I have schizophrenia and I'm under the impression (or delusion) that I can fix myself by playing out the  story of my psyche.  Does anyone know of any cases where people have found success from living out their delusions?  In my mind if you live it out you can figure out if it's true or not.  Like hypothetically, if a man's schizophrenic delusion is that he believes he knows the location of a hidden treasure... wouldn't it be healthy for him to actually go on the hunt for it?  


Please let me know your thoughts.",5.498191349934468,6.196104559633027,5.963591087811272,80.04100917431194,67.62385321100918,8.06343381389253,30.25032765399737,7.957251820313856,2.000010747051113,443,16,84,5,7,143,74,109,0.068,0.794,0.138,0.7948,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,5,1,1,1,8,0,0,6,0,9,1,0,0,1,22,16,7,0,4,7,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,6,6,0,0,6,1,0,1,2,1,0,0,2,0,13,7,17,11,0,10,0,0,0,0,10,9,0,6,1,60,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.21184176726781767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14762393556820524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15178953395860084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18125530063888454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445782881568777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1899708624374004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2380203876925491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12337331459869938,0.1820789844558877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35790954356663696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219821527261195,0.0,0.10605582549469623,0.0,0.5750649989540125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21919202302296198,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15049807137834414,0.0,0.0,0.2382920282885441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17233971368667436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ssssnape,2020/04/19,"I have to control and at least triple check everything. Don't know what to do about it. This problem goes on for quite a while now and increased over the past few months.
It startet with checking if I turned off the oven and the coffee machine, before I left the house. Seemed quite normal to me. But over time, checking once wasn't enough. I have to check multiple times until I am sure everything is turned off, no lights are on, all the windows are closed, the door is really locked. That costs a lot of time. And sometimes, when I left the house, I have to go back to check again, because I am not sure anymore. I really have to go back, because if I don't, my mind just starts spinning around all the possible bad scenarios that could happen if I didn't turn out the oven/the lights.
When I drive with the car, I sometimes have to turn around to make sure, I didn't run somebody over.
Needless to say, that every time I check, everything is turned off and I have never hit anybody with my car. I know that most of my thoughts are completely unrealistic and exaggerated, but I can't help it.
I tried to call some therapists, but I wasn't lucky yet. And I am quite sure that all of them will have a long waiting list.
Does anybody know how I can help myself until I get an appointment with a therapist?",5.249155405405407,5.572984579150578,5.211155888030888,86.53287282818535,68.07335907335907,8.637162162162161,28.542712355212355,8.472884824447931,1.7276117760617762,1022,32,218,14,16,318,129,259,0.067,0.894,0.04,-0.7472,0,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,1,4,12,7,0,0,15,0,27,0,0,3,8,48,45,19,0,6,8,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,10,15,0,2,5,0,7,7,10,2,0,0,5,3,29,5,34,37,11,41,0,0,0,0,5,15,0,8,19,151,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08942370194632482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16053956207981862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13866922937047524,0.075287586968509,0.10993271896587928,0.0,0.07672742062742981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0920729219643348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454078024098944,0.0,0.10113252087049317,0.07199283728199833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07890774932829826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0931689756284542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07597151195226719,0.0,0.2431150188121097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04710973004218662,0.0,0.10249056573466243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07973640132561277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12087714268642158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2080864980746236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14866404344123113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1959383849238189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07979698015212128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07665870199659873,0.0,0.0,0.0601886982069189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910452739201406,0.0,0.07197226337273772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06954411169115322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883467549787781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0960273461860641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08607678581942815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10165232114907173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08627982853771737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2877184026652853,0.0,0.0,0.11552950633825627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07170623491169491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208673094270302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17835945784487442,0.0,0.06382228433292421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33993393766870383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2093869803849207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158434063213218,0.2103137418480976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061219025946152236,0.4903914489808848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Valencetalon,2020/04/19,"Inability to speak in certain situations Does anyone else experience this? It’s as if my throat locks up and I can’t say the words I’m trying to say. I can’t even open my mouth sometimes. If I manage to force myself to speak I can only mutter a weak yes/no or grunting noises. 

Is there a name for this phenomenon? I want to know what it is because it’s really frustrating and it mostly happens when I talk to other people about something really sensitive or personal. Like, say my parents approach me to talk about what I fucked up in school or why I’ve been so sad for the past couple days - my voice just vanishes. There have been times where I’ve (unintentionally) made my parents wait for _hours_  because I couldn’t get anything to come out my mouth. Or sometimes I’m presenting something in front of class and I start stiffening up and stuttering like crazy. Sometimes while we’re having a beer a friend starts asking personal questions and I just go blank and I have to look away.

It sucks. I hate it. I can’t say simple things like “I’m sorry” or “You hurt me” face to face. It’s almost impossible to open up and speak to other people. It’s really hurting the important relationships I have because my voice locks up and I act like a wall and no one can read me or understand.",2.33170199878861,4.736278826771656,3.9223622047244113,84.34127801332527,79.62992125984252,7.057298606904907,23.155057540884318,8.139509932561175,1.4562500302846768,1018,34,199,20,26,338,134,254,0.15,0.7759999999999999,0.073,-0.9669,2,0,3,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,0,10,15,4,0,8,0,14,8,5,1,1,35,33,21,0,4,10,2,0,4,1,0,1,9,0,2,15,13,1,1,3,2,0,5,5,9,0,1,3,10,27,6,29,29,1,28,0,3,1,1,19,14,2,11,13,122,42,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11160480383224156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07793103434351623,0.1141975099029414,0.09171691731365132,0.0,0.10419418558260674,0.0,0.10471444131361572,0.0,0.0,0.20382346465487688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09600751332337204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332142428947725,0.0,0.07187843080834294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0975339038125927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09310528389075788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07361413270160744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1090231270982012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08610886968902637,0.10303717069947883,0.05822997003063717,0.0,0.06334171906534061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09855815890652428,0.0,0.0,0.1100374768357779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10975946622172172,0.0,0.2386270305930045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06125205123205036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21780263667484084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359305673491557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10546020726181572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07552392694997248,0.08476557841430138,0.0,0.0,0.2475123388103136,0.0,0.1063951895735854,0.15453595598254524,0.1946341833911598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12485367681239032,0.0,0.11148388366529416,0.0,0.21420032610163692,0.0,0.0,0.11965958779390914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3545298948797813,0.0,0.1127971176078072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252786540484272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17160504174919433,0.33069174485888225,0.12476331771765453,0.1577750371596264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17916456103671324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404490097220114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06498956199642371,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07566976170224267,0.0,0.0,0.11602725596262285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06573829331783508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10056964922371646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Suinar,2020/04/19,"How I became an Asshole (and hate it) Hello guys ...

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Since I can remember I was bullied in school; the worst happened between grade 1-8; changed school once, everything got worse and I ended up refusing to go to school with suicidal thoughts almost daily (weekly these days); changed school again with less bullying yet almost no friends.  Have one buddy from school days with whom I talk once every 1-2 years but that's it. Less than a handful of friends to this day total; countless false friends along the way.

​

Couldn't stand it in Germany after suffering constantly from their ways of screwing me over with their money-inspired rules and regulations (had a crash in a car on my first day after receiving my license (finished with the best possible grade...what a joke) and had to pay 2000 Euros for scratching a tiny tree that's still standing today; completely healed up like nothing happened. Another of countless times I struggled in Germany, the Deutsche Railway Company DB made me pay 60 Euros on two occasions cause they changed their ticketing system while I was abroad (every German district has more or less their own system, it's super confusing and I believe that's how they want it to be; to charge people over and over again). 

​

Moved to the UK for four years and left with a massive debt and a degree that didn't get me any proper job yet; also had to sue my landlord to get my deposit back (won - took one year) and ACER, after they sold me a crappy Laptop that kept failing (took 1.5 years to sue them but I also won) ... In retrospective it simply feels like a massive waste of time and lots of bad luck. I also dealt with a few pretty intense and in later days extremely hurting relationships that took me years to get my mind off. 

​

Essentially ran off to China; as far away as possible, working as a teacher ... Took me more than 6 months to get the visa, endless trouble and lots of money... Only to get a 6-months work visa that barely made my money back. Plus air pollution there was horrible ...really needed to move on. Ah ...and also trying to sue the airline that got me to China as they did some cheeky last minute charges that were illegal due to EU law (since the flight went from UK to China they need to obey these laws but no one cares; you just can't sue Chinese companies and hence I didn't win, didn't even get a case). Also China cheated me out of my last wage as I was unable to get my money after being paid after having left the country; to this day my money is stuck in China and I'll never see that again for sure - I tried for 1.5 years already and I am tired. A friend once told me that when it comes to big companies messing with you just better give up right away; you waste your time money and sanity and I ultimately did the latter... Sometimes I won but it always felt like something inside of me died.

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Vietnam: Had my Camera and brand new phone (my first actual decent phone + 1 month old) stolen after living in the south for a year, one month before I wanted to leave... Leaving with a very bitter taste. 

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Desperatly thought that I finally need a place of peace of mind and since Germany, England and China sucked (and Vietnam was lots of other trouble too) I just wanted to keep moving: bicycle trip from Vietnam to Germany. 

​

Several minor but extremely annoying and frequent repairs on the bike later, several times of dealing with bank troubles as my Visa card would not work due to unknown technical difficulties and if it did I had immense, previously undiscussed, charges; nothing but trouble. 

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I am currently going place to place, always thinking that I just need to get the f out of there; either weird people or constant trouble with the bank, bike and other stuff ...literally today a monkey ate my saddle (no joke + the saddle was expensive and brand new). 

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Don't get me started about Corona ....broke out 2 weeks after I quit my job and moved out of Vietnam ...I was already in the road and all I had was on the bike. I know it's a stupid coincidence but I was really trying to try something new before going completely insane and now the entire world has turned insane, nationalist and hostile. 'Stay at home'; funny ... My home is my bike; Germany has never been my home, J don't feel home anywhere, I can't stay in one place for longer than a few days before going crazy.

​

I approached this journey with decent saving, much of that money has already been eaten by ... Repairs, theft, and other garbage. I am certainly not having much fun, not that I ever did. And here is the point: EVERY time when I tried to relax lately and many times in the past, starting with Vietnam, bad stuff happens... I was tenting with a friend when my camera was stolen ... After months of struggling with a bad job, just needed a break. 

Today is another example. I struggled for weeks with fixing my bike and just generally being tense and charged and now that it's finally running again and I had ONE day to relax a monkey chews off my seat and handlebar. 

​

I could bring up loads of other examples, a lot of them I luckely already mentally pushed far far away yet I come more and more to the conclusion that every time I am having a good day or trying to be nice to people, bad stuff happens ... I simply can't keep my guard down anymore and started to seriously get pissed at everyone around me and assume the worst constantly - and surprisingly when I do, people finally leave me alone; they back off ... I don't want them to be close anyways, yet when I am relaxed crap is happening again. Did I mention that the room-service from my current (crap) hotel 'accidentially' stole some stuff from my room a few days ago. It got recovered in the end but it's just another thing. I am just so sick of everything. I even tried Vipasana meditation last year just to not be so angry and disappointed anymore yet I keep finding myself constantly being on edge which makes me pissed at people around me. I just don't have any trust anymore. Speaking of disappointment - J don't even expect anything of people, I just want them to not screw with me all the time.

​

I am 24 years old, travelled 1/4 of the globe and yet find nothing but garbage and people I can not trust. I know I am not treating people right but I treat as I am treated and I feel beaten to the ground almost daily. Trying to be nice is getting harder by the day.

​

The worst thing is that it's never anything mayor like a broken bone or a shitty illness, it's these little things that happen constantly; sueing people; money issues all the time and people messing with me constantly ... Those things grind me every day. 

Sometimes I wish I could live in a cave far away from everyone but I already know that there will always be someone who already 'ownes' the places that will surely kick me around again.  

​

I am starting to sympathise with all these assholes and criminals out there: this world is sick and it made me sick, so sick. Sometimes I wonder if I am doing this trip only so that I can say one day 'I have seen it all, yet there is nothing out there' and justify jumping of a bridge finally, but I haven't convinced myself yet that there truly isn't anything... At least to this point I haven't found a lot that makes me want to keep going in any way, just so drained and full of anger lately. 

​

I just can't stand this anymore ... I want things to be better for once, I would love to have some proper friends or anyone I can rely in, yet I keep coming back to what I figured as a child, something that held true to this day: Everytime you rely on someone, rely in being disappointed. 

​

Sorry for the depressing read. Not even sure why I'm posting about this stuff. 'Everyone has their issues' .... Why would mine matter. They never did anyways.",6.469269562652112,7.000745232214763,6.436653883029723,78.07818533815178,65.46979865771812,8.750792831329745,31.74275389040489,8.551994628687353,2.4914891216166386,6236,229,1107,82,91,1975,529,1490,0.18899999999999997,0.721,0.091,-0.9995,7,2,3,0,0,0,274.0,0,5,16,17,74,88,15,5,66,1,99,20,6,9,16,219,193,97,2,22,41,0,6,4,6,5,7,2,6,2,75,85,4,9,18,14,22,29,31,44,1,11,58,12,140,44,185,116,35,240,0,8,2,3,45,78,7,23,125,765,215,19,0.0,0.0,0.020805362587544767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018899000844016,0.0,0.06404706435367366,0.022081215497199862,0.1411637017926369,0.08524846512436395,0.05322014566122964,0.3696054743546212,0.4145004890193771,0.04349524004226124,0.06706801727035841,0.0,0.0,0.08457532439938786,0.014907524289157913,0.0,0.05263392886150114,0.05693828333392857,0.0,0.0,0.08012382181031341,0.06557542800711054,0.07120564182112202,0.0,0.0,0.054425557894496164,0.024020475432079164,0.02237415159521564,0.03771182884668475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021737284225080044,0.021901637118271356,0.06766158306933738,0.055096189170324966,0.044707482377839176,0.13823685984299516,0.0,0.03404476349688627,0.0,0.0,0.19249599944819806,0.02198010854111529,0.01836298893776189,0.0,0.022126919538170132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03776659803772886,0.0,0.0,0.05632695526340384,0.01928527000365213,0.0898156071688307,0.06111686767830776,0.038322299969828284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03234028125824201,0.015231098670130366,0.02047065955812518,0.09342060154718243,0.03897240861241194,0.03626976798567013,0.0,0.023376412182734698,0.0988312353773778,0.0,0.12252771567723605,0.020452202730395542,0.060583580305202514,0.017882305930668876,0.05115494507320513,0.0,0.0,0.021110271689976253,0.11311987529773652,0.0,0.0,0.021049205524672838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554327861662503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.022823630435432618,0.0,0.0,0.044505334271154065,0.06347079089727223,0.09475151552542817,0.0,0.0,0.03515094272241644,0.05213623241060393,0.04810005015242446,0.06772478912632457,0.04632874759862583,0.0,0.0,0.041663736710597934,0.02136836219353566,0.03765211481177027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09062802210550844,0.01924224155487933,0.060520841839408236,0.02846269258167427,0.021615256322947776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.021485667376557518,0.0,0.043054488962271625,0.0,0.08508758570184709,0.09063965803303356,0.031345484052794574,0.07904299770887205,0.06577356649668736,0.0617733170169275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818289242522105,0.0,0.044743761023557496,0.09082093201390302,0.1011294600966735,0.03242982541526734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020352467873406915,0.14780687416538185,0.0,0.1113749432071076,0.0,0.040308811148925185,0.04807046593918623,0.02041878244901054,0.021690227732955838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02267657298108004,0.02132589048240061,0.0,0.027316430833192355,0.0,0.0,0.022889831073013817,0.024151540932689567,0.03641453360861746,0.0,0.01695461591031949,0.0,0.1078855031663832,0.016989376075676868,0.0,0.0,0.048171336295719486,0.0,0.052908673109791485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03612893859733049,0.049239812153813255,0.063258434335383,0.023866129904980573,0.060361965383707486,0.045448824411097065,0.017026276134892927,0.0,0.0,0.0668652585497721,0.12203218849546615,0.023320751928986742,0.0,0.06028188506013067,0.0,0.0,0.017136305631707132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07082070506505589,0.0136610726391363,0.0,0.03385158911511425,0.1118874058259723,0.02450434272114747,0.060626945306758176,0.020372289226102583,0.0947497553994428,0.1157997011109684,0.023190169372063644,0.02082666023818237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.01759133261147366,0.0880261180713385,0.05076875893212425,0.0513051450604084,0.0,0.0,0.019763965722328667,0.03847618605820236,0.0,0.024517086918062744,0.0,0.02312076172010042,0.04656390592971072,0.0,0.021727024681916358,0.04543560666658671,0.0,0.4145004890193771,0.12356512998589758
mentalhealth,sidenotes30,2020/04/19,"Am I screwed indefinitely (9 reasons inside; 31M)? All my life I was a popular, successful, intellectual, beloved, active in society, I had friends, worked and developed and progressed in life and although I came from a poor family, then came the last two years and the following troubles:


1. I have been unemployed for two and a half years after completing my bachelor's degree with honors
2. I live with my father who is a realy ill and needs daily help.
3. I am treated with testosterone injections once every three months (about a year already) after a benign brain tumor was discovered - this fact hurting my sense of masculinity
4. I am diagnosed with depression and social anxiety (and afraid that being there in my medical record will hurt me in the future and another mistake I made is that I told a psychiatrist and he wrote in the medical record that I smoked cannabis in the past)
4. I suffer from eye floaters and deteriorating vision (doctors do not diagnose the problem)
5. I am lonely, anxious and isolated
6. I am single and afraid that I will never have a wife who will love me with all the troubles I have
7. After surgery for gynecomastia (male breasts) that left scars and scars on me, the surgical clinic closed but I have no money to fix the defects.
8. I developed technology anxiety; In the past I was very active on the social network and today every post I upload I delete, every email and phone call.
9. I changed my last name 3 times during 31 years of my life (I was born with my biological father's last name, at 20 I changed to a surname I loved then and at 29 I changed to my stepfather's family who raised me - this is my father that I take care of). All my diplomas carries a different name (even my BA degree) and it makes me anxious.

How to live with all this? Can a person like me succeed in this? I feel like the universe is laughing at me.",4.860341641598623,6.276042215083798,6.029720670391065,76.35699613235928,69.58659217877096,9.194843145681137,31.36699613235926,9.565088089820216,3.0362377309841,1475,63,269,33,26,493,185,358,0.107,0.755,0.139,0.9568,3,3,1,0,0,0,49.0,0,0,0,5,4,26,1,2,23,0,25,16,3,4,6,49,38,23,0,3,2,4,1,2,1,3,10,0,0,2,14,28,0,0,2,0,2,3,3,13,0,4,11,2,47,13,35,23,5,39,0,5,1,4,24,15,1,1,22,181,61,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10697931156169777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1016534735810568,0.14832267583317815,0.21903660764690536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10822075288255238,0.09898991986251274,0.22175455491551155,0.09884012697694686,0.0,0.3076593834255722,0.0,0.10164317651850012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0834970983261352,0.19679076136323895,0.0,0.10128508616489992,0.0,0.09922554697366187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06403011701935755,0.0,0.2450366639684342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827789786712175,0.0,0.049017431262898016,0.06925629305693767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07489813165281747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06497903190458845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2075595559182382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370651171602247,0.0,0.0,0.10532914893866503,0.0,0.20542170040437965,0.09472317204322746,0.0,0.17120537093829402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17499017622550808,0.09173006818176248,0.06471038699564433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953202956603561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0773791950075258,0.0,0.0,0.07188220800066082,0.07476862791303104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10324142104722578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18508664542195025,0.0,0.08464712604181053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09284485720834908,0.0,0.0,0.09276161905677699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09967382973975278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19764291538478695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07288927598381116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05652840163906376,0.0,0.09189088680223306,0.09263345103597694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893989811360711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07998835231705953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07057585677799133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2497131556447092
mentalhealth,ollikev,2020/04/19,"Too sacred to talk to any adults about possibly being depressed. I'm not completely sure, but I think I might be depressed. My friend said that the only way to find out is by talking to (for example) our school councelor. But I'm just too afraid to talk about it with an adult. What should I do?",2.9108474576271206,4.7129109322033935,3.212,93.05122033898306,75.27118644067797,6.753898305084746,23.664406779661018,7.554174236665415,0.8494854237288139,231,7,50,3,5,71,45,59,0.131,0.8,0.069,-0.4385,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,1,0,0,0,5,5,0,1,2,0,6,0,0,0,1,11,10,2,0,1,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,0,2,3,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,1,5,2,11,5,0,2,0,2,0,0,8,1,0,1,0,33,8,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576436109008064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24305587057844175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3993275420852031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21187667477612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17910135453372908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2459213616907003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17630738815482475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2613390047154999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2205111946165528,0.0,0.0,0.23461133126025865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2184849198108328,0.0,0.0,0.5589775306887868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14853906893162375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18400566294694146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rando_bamboni_panini,2020/04/19,"I'm a mess, help 20y old (m), suicidal, hello there, I don't really know how to put it, I'm probably going to sound crazy / dumb but IL take a shot, I feel like I'm 2 different people all the time, I know we normally have a inner voice that we talk to and what ever but mine is aggressive, it makes me wanna hurt people around me and it makes me think about suicide, when I get these taughts in my head I clench my teeth tightly and rub my head dismissing the taught, but 1 year ago from now (or maybe 2) I stopped self harm and about 1 month ago I was in bed and got up and went to the bathroom to cut myself and I had no emotional at all, it didn't feel like me, after 2 deep cuts I stopped and looked at them and it took me some time to realize what I did, I felt sick and scared.
I feel like I don't wanna live anymore, I have been hurt emotionally soo much by people I trusted, I have cried nights on end and I can't control my feelings anymore, I just don't know, I don't even make sense here, you are probably thinking I'm just confused or overwhelmed or something, I just don't know anymore, it Is too much to write, I'm sorry for wasting your time person reading, hope you have a nice day",3.173764705882352,3.5786401803921604,4.420000000000002,90.09000000000002,72.68627450980392,7.725490196078431,25.980392156862745,7.724431198458867,1.1219803921568636,926,28,216,11,17,306,142,255,0.22899999999999998,0.675,0.096,-0.9887,1,0,1,0,0,3,28.0,2,3,1,1,14,17,4,3,7,0,18,4,3,5,3,53,47,19,2,4,9,0,7,3,0,0,1,2,1,2,10,14,0,4,12,1,0,4,8,11,0,0,11,10,37,6,22,36,5,30,0,3,1,0,12,9,1,6,20,128,47,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1807000234703768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3032454578575601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09073450689909172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11431711029688722,0.0,0.0,0.11195939156743336,0.06573293761728287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648951771388784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2293029218190049,0.09027494638657994,0.0,0.0,0.06732023971874877,0.09219663968097827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.206144569251246,0.21844487255343173,0.09786360382587488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05325139884711911,0.0,0.05792610135014546,0.0,0.08151841686982482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20920809806312668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0683179136340896,0.0,0.0,0.10123412974786658,0.0,0.0,0.2182247934375716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22406038736725734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493856394236136,0.0,0.09000129274493475,0.0,0.08559099705683808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2041063940359243,0.0,0.10239696439284628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08135524655648538,0.0,0.14985262318308587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564933636383843,0.09986447135253533,0.0,0.0,0.10695272641449977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21198506088662614,0.08899663286442329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2197839242978049,0.0,0.0,0.10246237886151277,0.0,0.0,0.10195218632197267,0.0,0.06529551130010793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204430957160464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10632959098205283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07846653980377191,0.0,0.11409624957349415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17042706577936245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22297794765425608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07663461759210506,0.0819231359213756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13061834151428553,0.0,0.0,0.17829916887902944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11324198542163208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0944851291179055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06563610329591005
mentalhealth,Chikmagnet,2020/04/19,"Link to Podcast Epsiode regarding Mental Health Hi,

Started a podcast with friends and our most recent episode was on mental health. Please check it out. Would love the support, feedback, but more importantly, fact checked. Thanks in advance!

https://anchor.fm/jjkflood/episodes/Floodmen-Podcast---Ep--4---I-Dont-Have-Corona----Get-Me-Out-of-Here-ecuvtb",19.6015,26.22132815,8.370000000000001,52.86500000000001,42.5,7.0,42.5,8.07648339933343,4.25625,306,13,27,3,4,68,37,40,0.0,0.6779999999999999,0.322,0.9285,0,0,0,0,0,0,36.0,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,0,1,8,6,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,4,5,4,2,6,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,2,15,2,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2845790870094758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18759939749315796,0.0,0.12686158038356307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5162050925264239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2191513386428508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4894037686595433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665395606855977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397519642700081,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1718667427496062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27554524545862025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22355277631943676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17248984904096076,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SapphireLegend,2020/04/19,"New here, looking for a subreddit that can tell me if punching my forehead out of anger is the reason for my bad short term memory Also how are you guys dealing with frustration?",15.379705882352946,8.058943441176474,13.634705882352948,57.86617647058826,55.764705882352935,17.129411764705885,51.647058823529406,13.023866798666859,6.401564705882352,143,6,25,3,1,46,32,34,0.256,0.7440000000000001,0.0,-0.8834,0,0,0,0,0,0,2.0,0,1,0,0,3,3,2,0,2,0,3,1,1,2,0,5,4,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,5,4,1,4,0,0,1,0,4,2,0,1,2,19,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3057952727759831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3192777229495224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3942248858774521,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3786239013449668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211093267950177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.369312383902575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3931582000607943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3342236684133255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jlmj5949,2020/04/19,"My Work = My Worth and I Hate It I’ve noticed a pattern over the last few years and I’m just wondering if anyone else has overcame this or not. I’ve been told I’m an extremely hard worker my entire life- great work ethic yada yada. I care so much about whatever job I’m working as if my life depends on it. From coffee shops to sales jobs to marketing jobs, my work literally equates to my worth as a human being and it’s beginning to tear me apart. If I have a less than positive eval or anyone expressed displeasure in my work I truly spiral into massive panic attacks and depression. I feel worthless, as if I am not who I thought I was, as if I can’t go on, I must run away/am not good enough, etc. 

I visit a therapist bi-weekly and have been off my medication now for over a year (big accomplishment!) 

Trying to face this for what it really is - am I just placing my worth in the wrong place? I care about this part of my character, but when is enough? When and how do I push through this? So often I tell myself, It’s just a job, but even as the words leave my mouth my heart and brain can never catch up. I am young (26), so all of these jobs will likely never by my “forever” career. 

I’m a creative, and hope one day to be able to live solely off my own creations in video/photography.. but until then- how do I do this? how do I cope?

Any and all advice would be really appreciated. I’m ready to truly work through this and not let my jobs control my emotions.",2.513314207650275,3.8288863901639374,4.3773975409836074,86.31374658469947,75.2622950819672,7.443989071038255,23.855874316939893,8.07648339933343,1.200193989071038,1139,34,246,18,24,388,169,305,0.057,0.81,0.133,0.9771,6,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,0,0,9,17,12,2,1,11,0,24,7,4,5,5,45,39,35,0,8,17,0,2,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,14,11,0,1,3,1,5,5,7,6,0,1,5,2,36,6,36,27,10,33,0,2,0,0,6,15,0,11,14,173,50,16,0.09369257708427074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09155530196961176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0637141652726721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13102405671649234,0.09599911729934624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10658883233295012,0.08802726034171066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10459190202166796,0.0,0.0,0.19105165324069276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10508419204154476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06042396122584216,0.0,0.08069727935360432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07826812578500524,0.10539153854369146,0.0,0.19361895546521526,0.10449198996321077,0.06188306352842138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047373782120762105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05324765070327726,0.078584888444075,0.0,0.10329639699926196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393014596987851,0.0925020226365711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102615495703118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09305786949963817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5578525545259791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0763719553053642,0.0,0.09920691099207414,0.0,0.09580700793497662,0.1323556760266157,0.045773460568504884,0.0,0.08273226209299607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943854144533714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06887482456302704,0.0,0.14452298282310475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666962000066196,0.0,0.0,0.06348851501525532,0.0,0.0,0.1099280520149292,0.0,0.1014599307072804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19577760320910384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12004372803146746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189144203915212,0.0,0.0,0.10878430334958622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07438144064249362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08952727251120349,0.0,0.06361110969793632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07515453388787265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10160560319013454,0.40925587194333934,0.0,0.0,0.06655651858930466,0.10243812493449324,0.0,0.12066989562093385
mentalhealth,Malkiot,2020/04/19,"Today I woke up to an angry girlfriend. I apparently woke up during the night and shouted at her. Is this normal? I mean, obviously, it's not ""normal"" normal, but should I be worried that there's some underlying condition?

How do I explain that I literally can't recall anything? She just says that it's ""very convenient"" that I don't remember anything.",4.051818181818181,6.454265696969702,6.042424242424243,71.3336363636364,73.84848484848484,8.642424242424243,30.696969696969692,9.2995712137729,3.292078787878788,280,13,46,7,6,97,47,66,0.095,0.905,0.0,-0.6694,1,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,6,0,0,1,1,14,10,3,0,4,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,0,0,7,1,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,2,2,9,0,5,6,1,6,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,1,2,36,16,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.388551199564586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2571628112978995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22154722582339584,0.6939315240718829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2674352001754243,0.0,0.0,0.18774210359954796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2237783957460552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1947926043896537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2397530136350293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Aimer_la_vie_,2020/04/19,"Dampened emotions, negativity and pure elation I've been doing a lot of work on my mental health throughout the past 6 months, and I've uncovered so much- but that definitely leaves more questions.

The most annoying recently is my mood, I've noticed that throughout every day life i feel somewhat blank.  This is somewhat long sorry.

Emotions blend together, sometimes indistiguishable, but I can feel them on a small scale- it's just hard to recognise. I feel happiness, sadness, anxiousness, but sometimes its so dulled down I have no name to distinguish it. I know its there in the group, I just can't... pick it?

But when emotions are strong, I can't control it- and a lot of the time there is not starting point. -Anger takes over me to the point I can't function at times, and it'll build and build until I can't handle it and curl up to stop myself from hurting me or others.
-Pure elation and extacy comes in, I can't control it. Like anger, it starts for no reason and either spirals out of control, or when I catch it, I can force it back enough- but also like anger, these instances start for absolutely no reason.
-Lately, as of c*rona, I've been having depressive stages that also come for no reason- sure I do have depression, I've been diagnosed, but it's pretty high functioning and over the past several years I've hardly ever felt repulsed by the things I love. Now, a wave of pure sadness starts to come over for absolutely no reason, I can't do anything, sometimes getting out of bed is impossible.

The latter, yes may just be from the v*rus, but as I said, throughout years of myself having depression, I've never had it to where I can't physically do the things i love- let alone getting out of bed. Its.. different, and with the other emotional factors going on it concerns me.

Does anyone have any idea if I should ask my psychologist to look in to something, or if any of the above could relate to a different mental health issue? If the last point doesn't fit, that can be taken out- i wouldnt be surprised if it is from self isolating, but it's a factor I didnt want to miss just in case.",6.077941176470588,6.539755499999997,6.305682352941176,78.92167058823532,66.30392156862746,9.077019607843138,31.76117647058824,8.954980946260402,2.5648804705882355,1676,63,315,26,25,537,204,408,0.183,0.7040000000000001,0.113,-0.981,2,1,1,0,0,0,64.0,0,0,1,5,16,21,4,0,19,1,40,6,0,8,6,73,64,34,0,8,21,0,6,2,0,4,4,1,2,1,28,18,0,4,12,0,0,5,18,12,0,0,8,8,30,8,48,47,9,54,0,8,1,2,9,24,0,14,26,222,58,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08075353618235948,0.0,0.12470536350290888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604471904965447,0.0,0.0,0.08808404929072597,0.0,0.054518525134025136,0.0,0.0641627703764158,0.0,0.07289154280264262,0.0,0.0,0.059954214238312986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20149307932075425,0.0,0.0,0.2623503793995056,0.06225280128293456,0.0,0.0,0.05028428109070727,0.0,0.20146666633318253,0.07913803683365224,0.0,0.162924373564923,0.0,0.0,0.06823218286809288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508235899268769,0.0,0.08056398309200988,0.0,0.0,0.07052844302090089,0.06569319414656775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1182721156390284,0.0,0.0748635484995585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147234568131836,0.0,0.04431221954111587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08300064918736748,0.13969183636138352,0.0,0.0,0.16575719620397705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0823797191861519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08346863271246244,0.08801878192221375,0.0,0.08138055447693528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04285034226397337,0.06355605938624627,0.08795369849204357,0.08255910564719361,0.0,0.07972973667607873,0.05507260598487988,0.0761845304751956,0.0,0.0,0.06900110810927039,0.06547526872902673,0.0,0.0,0.13257482611246504,0.14074216610301168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15715109687824935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06223501085359232,0.0,0.057317014113917535,0.0,0.06013536803042634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08876950545999986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886261592111105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221120914289936,0.0,0.0,0.07932364911066525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0873443856444602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3206651025547273,0.07698609323533231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07416744499442446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08133984627815707,0.08808404929072597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0600252124236515,0.231343345505122,0.0872811727714509,0.22075062653456207,0.0,0.0,0.06518651677344707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07348592120395138,0.0,0.05862383139966475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359977456234568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09093001521148412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04598880056844118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05676318049254296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10042040984221776
mentalhealth,Meta_Baron327,2020/04/19,"I just saw this Adam Sandler movie called Punch Drunk Love and I never related to a character so much before. I just watched Punch Drunk Love and it was a wonderful and emotional movie. I think it has a positive message about that everyone is capable of finding love. The film doesn't explicitly state it but if you tend to know certain quirks that he has you can tell he is in the Autistic spectrum or has Asperger's syndrome. Barry is the main character and his struggle is that he knows there is something wrong with him in terms that he doesn't feel right about himself. His family is judgemental about his social awkwardness and I also loved the fact that Adam Sandler's performance captures the mannerisms that certain people who are in the Autistic spectrum including me have. Like for example I tend to swing my head back and forth and fidget my fingers whenever I talk to someone. I'm really glad that I saw this film and I want to recommend to anyone that feels as if they might never find love or they are judged by the people who they love about their mental disabilities. I know it's just a movie but i felt hope watching this that I may truly find love in life. Which again, is why I am recommending this movie to people who feel hopelessly lonely or tend to feel socially awkward. Stay safe and stay hopeful y'all.",6.960329380764165,7.358844505928857,6.7524268774703575,76.69240843214756,64.41501976284584,10.541133069828724,33.862714097496706,10.355215969177356,3.4647114097496714,1072,43,195,24,15,338,138,253,0.075,0.68,0.245,0.9946,0,2,1,0,0,1,12.0,0,3,4,1,12,20,0,3,11,0,20,12,2,0,6,45,46,19,0,5,10,0,6,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,21,10,2,1,13,4,0,0,4,6,0,0,4,10,28,14,21,40,3,13,0,2,4,7,32,5,0,10,6,129,49,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08229114750617025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07195186907126516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07912572400923981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08756250735751901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10507502847095776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11575154017590995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09832781477636483,0.0,0.0,0.09700738425915144,0.0,0.20812252369436302,0.0,0.09880260382335193,0.0,0.2821532523590987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560772351254294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2044109397948763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1696576828879824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07268312790003185,0.050272997559374484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6501151047601481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1037015869302431,0.10916336448852904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564522857032706,0.0,0.15872961040089406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2140190547705208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06592202087618235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08787823194774183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2097924211877672,0.08718901305193658,0.07921942522590363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21936089454159105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10757610799463964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0827091873380019,0.08994138119853375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0659358113955286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06069460149757173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285356333898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11159344689597392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11250780563360166,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FrananaBanana452,2020/04/19,"I have a sex addiction I (18 F) was sexually abused when I was 13 by a 40 Y/O family ""friend"". A few other things have happened that aren't to do with him, but he's the main reason that I have a warped relationship with sex.
I had trauma therapy to help me come to terms with what happened, and help me stop blaming myself. My trauma therapist added everything together, and diagnosed me with a borderline sex addiction.
It is not how it is portrayed in the movies. I don't fuck a new person everyday. I have a partner (21 M) that usually helps me out when I'm struggling.

When I'm struggling, I get this hot, tingling feeling in my pubic area and lower abdomen. It's really intense. It feels like when you're about to cum, and you get that hot pressure building up inside of you that makes you just yearn for the release. This is almost constant for me, and I call it my ""itch that I need to scratch"". Nothing gets rid of it other than sex. 

So, this is my problem. I've been in quarantine for 7 weeks now, and this pressure is getting worse and worse. Obviously, I can't go to my partner to help me out, so I've been trying every way possible that could at least calm me down a little bit, and whatever I do just ends with me crying in frustration. 
I live in a rehabilitation facility, and I'm the only female here. Everybody else is in their 30s-40s and male. I love my partner with all of my heart, and I'd never cheat on him just to get my fix, but being surrounded by men that are all around the same age as the man that abused me is making everything 10× more difficult. 

I'm going insane. I don't know what to do. I just want this feeling to go away. I don't want to break, and do something that I shouldn't do.",4.488212898212897,4.741761888888892,5.86133255633256,81.45652097902102,69.71225071225071,9.230821030821033,29.62975912975913,9.218907990703514,2.3266170940170943,1337,48,281,25,22,453,179,351,0.16899999999999998,0.722,0.109,-0.9798,1,1,1,0,2,0,48.0,0,3,1,0,15,16,3,4,15,0,30,14,3,4,4,51,56,22,0,7,7,0,6,1,4,1,5,0,0,7,26,22,0,1,5,0,0,4,8,12,0,0,5,6,42,4,42,48,9,38,0,1,0,7,22,17,1,1,16,191,68,0,0.0,0.259460782534908,0.0,0.2387253902765058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10964065477696844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974713006693866,0.0,0.0,0.1028715567430846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11953715970321513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11180381139737552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431786323557943,0.0,0.11832220555655068,0.0,0.08742063822582234,0.0,0.12027207609523173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11113231124320566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09146671055775107,0.0,0.09697761902144833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09225192828326792,0.0,0.1968091170291259,0.0,0.1032195322874514,0.0,0.166087687949819,0.0782212728101372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08459342725964346,0.10122380465663712,0.2860258619063997,0.0,0.1866808770201817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19364723927774305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12974882275436245,0.2935613419198597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060174067539324985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05349237415683938,0.1097399816550508,0.09668364733090136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988210147370736,0.0,0.14617383089431166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08118710306357448,0.08444715972332817,0.10574828048450116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10506075015200174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08327377676199622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09560439414894813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12343604068803887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1047692792997866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07014352787933498,0.11257625096530273,0.0,0.1175536814328079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429246992222764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09154040914806502,0.0,0.22893010954397625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252139102617461,0.12712892110174254,0.07274177406996715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433803864143601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12059022520592985,0.0,0.12916271120590678,0.08690983775297566,0.08782806448064588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2231638782998203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imnbrt,2020/04/19,"I feel scared 24/24h A few days ago I got a video about slaughtering human body parts from an unknown number, it made me so afraid, I was shaking and crying. After that, everything makes me scared and I cry for no reason especially that I get phone calls from numbers I don't know and when I answer no one replies. I need help, how can I stop feeling anxious and scared the whole time. I am quarantined at home so clearly no one can hurt me but I still feel so scared.",2.8841489361702126,4.70012076595745,3.4286702127659576,91.40875,75.38297872340425,6.402127659574468,23.45212765957447,7.1686216300943375,0.7173659574468085,368,11,78,4,8,115,66,94,0.268,0.664,0.068,-0.9311,0,1,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,0,6,4,0,5,1,1,4,1,17,14,10,1,1,1,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,3,4,0,1,6,1,0,1,4,7,0,2,3,3,14,0,6,11,3,9,0,1,0,0,4,1,0,0,7,51,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13772877807484588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17552724985306906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17258436193483168,0.0,0.0,0.15865319120219712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3413398603595355,0.10020272276038306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13963922197329698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2356837515939285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08117597278776577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12426597108790585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414323788938012,0.0,0.1558517740385509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16632999580500665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0853889301573001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14701767681441505,0.10371267513952227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520710094325215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.210569513798154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1682538036516754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15974930770243811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6222218590510558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12408106791350368,0.12989877405589262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059923804416872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17346839100522946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Syon007,2020/04/19,"Please help I possibly have D.I.D and in an abusive family and don’t know what to do I am going to turn 15 in August and inly recently at around 14 I realized I as well as my family were different I don’t know for sure but not to long ago my mum and dad were fighting and my mum hit my dad he also called scizthophrenic (sorry for spelling) I don’t know if my mum is or not I’m to scared to ask.I do know my sister seems like he most normal but I can’t talk to her either as I don’t want to stop her from achieving her goals as I know I’d be a obstacle for her if I tried to talk to her. My dad has gone down because of my mums abuse he used to always be happy and now it’s all gone and gets mad really easy.
I also believe I have D.I.D or multiple personalities disorder I feel this way as I don’t understand or remember a lot of things I do for one I’m told I hit myself I do know this it’s almost like I’m a passenger in my own body I feel like I can’t be self sufficient and need someone to constantly help me with everyday tasks like brushing my teeth I don’t know why I hit myself but I only feel the pain when I wake up the next morning. The only time I truly feel safe and happy is either when my family is in a good mood or when I’m playing video games.
I don’t know why but I feel I can’t talk to anyone I don’t feel brave enough and I do love my family and don’t want to see them get arrested as sometimes they do grab me and are very emotionally and mentally abusive but sometimes get physical 
Any help in the comments would be appreciated",2.806754975282036,3.1632498833819263,5.019089871973634,85.63995183166435,73.48979591836735,8.76405121054633,24.82557992140956,8.964715089967882,1.5409973127139054,1222,34,285,24,23,430,157,343,0.107,0.6890000000000001,0.203,0.9859,1,0,0,0,3,0,11.0,0,0,2,2,8,18,2,1,9,0,33,5,3,1,2,61,70,35,0,7,15,8,7,4,0,1,1,0,0,2,6,15,0,2,18,3,0,3,14,4,1,1,5,9,52,13,37,57,7,27,0,0,1,1,32,10,0,10,17,178,58,2,0.0,0.3066905379533516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07648387551479692,0.0,0.08639905953309697,0.0,0.0,0.13799952808539792,0.07179361895422967,0.0,0.0,0.05867478660795359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06033045034371664,0.0,0.0,0.07680936169556485,0.08066211609211682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05259676720077823,0.0,0.0,0.09721037995165167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09583996197839713,0.0,0.0,0.08810367081990611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09324029761372082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09014643008936823,0.09888676150925182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09705574902960146,0.0,0.08915247375962307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3253563391507693,0.0,0.2617609328963115,0.06163994934201476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13523650796026207,0.0,0.049036105692021,0.07236933169151383,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836977993071036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17349921825583905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3793470846561093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16861230275375244,0.0,0.0,0.07635694318975082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07335395577872282,0.07787296375379739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08695206283888181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06397708373028563,0.0,0.0,0.09176199199369904,0.0,0.08453813838635679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058466983827436925,0.13124284984691467,0.09181023753487527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0753382014956353,0.0,0.09471183555966724,0.0,0.09727010340853906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05527452251572259,0.0,0.08519316440921558,0.0,0.09774079939105526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08638343394069882,0.0,0.06875566256496429,0.07854798313514517,0.09001104752533483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310654317037367,0.0,0.17067040587317006,0.09658574671424898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07213569889523427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08131985796127747,0.0,0.0,0.2080508505507572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057321993207709275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05031178625965901,0.0,0.0,0.08244624390363091,0.0,0.058579882063092885,0.09385014806121733,0.0,0.0898227088006449,0.0,0.07452003138225405,0.0,0.0711917685331683,0.10178283591644118,0.06848671472553534,0.0,0.0,0.07757796979000675,0.0,0.15571234950716978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061292328148427264,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jake898zo,2020/04/19,"Will life get better over time I am not going to post about my mental health again since I don't find it useful No one help me and I don't think it became useless but I need to get this off my chest 

Did your life get better overtime 
Whenever I talk to someone they tell me it will get better but it keeps getting worse overtime 
I had TERRIBLE childhood and been living in hell since 2017 ( I am 17 now )
And honestly I would have killed my self but my I don't want my mom to feel sad 
I have anxiety depression bdd and probably bpd  ( last one self diagnosed since I fit all the symptoms ) 
And there is this unbearable pressure on my chest worse than any pain I ever felt in my life 
Also now I am losing my hair at young age 


Please help me how to stop the feeling",1.073324646314223,3.3070883354430407,2.5233134772896517,93.5255212211467,83.36708860759494,5.742963514519732,20.0536113179449,7.048011613610866,0.3637233060312735,599,17,130,8,17,194,97,158,0.285,0.581,0.134,-0.9866,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,1,4,8,13,2,1,2,0,15,10,3,2,2,23,29,10,1,3,4,1,4,0,0,3,7,0,0,2,6,5,0,2,5,0,0,1,5,9,0,2,4,4,26,4,13,22,1,19,1,4,0,0,9,7,1,0,10,82,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09913711747319273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430245078907203,0.0,0.0948351354004752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3289187084819041,0.0,0.0,0.1561332817401121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10677340576314696,0.12582485041218988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11213609975646856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12536383138148818,0.0,0.11902866394175053,0.0,0.11330445202695305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3238406624121272,0.0,0.07045383760166883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13177212407321534,0.0,0.0,0.1661861951787956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1101884017700958,0.13715215912198872,0.0,0.0,0.10105041753654063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262686668273921,0.0,0.0,0.10946596292857476,0.0,0.0,0.1386884159893531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12493052676035615,0.0,0.0,0.1451897539890624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0919206573146641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168007770009677,0.0,0.13191062940598192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360795721296958,0.0,0.0,0.11872701938703832,0.0,0.133658407427899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25865119732531794,0.0,0.0,0.3076426850491807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10503763395270993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10364274942972647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12885015697292884,0.0,0.09964073499673813,0.10835344437154287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943365086163942,0.0,0.0,0.07228670320703431,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10706849809916473,0.0,0.0,0.07311950338524835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526678451150789,0.08806326833372792,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LucianChewwy,2020/04/19,"I don’t want to be me anymore I feel like I’ve tried everything to change my mood and how I think about myself and it’s just not working. Everyday there’s something that pops into my head and I think it over a million times. No one reaches out to me. I write, I talk, I sing, I paint, I ask questions. I’m more talkative now than I ever was and it’s just not working.

I hate my life. I hate the person I look at in the mirror. This fragile, weak person. I hate myself. I can’t do anything right. My whole life is a mess. I don’t listen when people tell me not to do certain things. I’m an idiot. I’m so stupid. I let people walk over me and abuse me all the time. I’m a worthless piece of shit. No one will ever love me.",-1.7954245283018864,0.10927889937106984,0.9459512578616368,100.08043632075471,99.62893081761007,3.4047169811320765,15.43003144654088,5.148860815047168,-0.9954761006289304,551,14,133,3,24,188,92,159,0.185,0.7,0.115,-0.9024,0,0,1,0,1,1,22.0,0,0,0,2,10,13,6,0,7,0,10,6,2,1,4,23,25,8,0,1,5,0,2,1,0,1,3,1,0,2,6,7,0,0,4,1,0,1,8,9,0,3,1,4,29,3,13,21,4,15,0,1,1,1,9,7,1,1,8,91,35,2,0.0,0.1786240270990236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14951180213093013,0.0,0.0,0.12406130059326805,0.0,0.14093873361910875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1594823752919826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2727391700408039,0.0,0.0,0.13549191022275492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07622796628021218,0.10770181618702422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4465280634181206,0.15472159080035475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15416065687258518,0.21297020329584024,0.07365292895235025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1265990690171714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1360653231821126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20431555873781992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2090337557034856,0.2632728033023621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16888388732283752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12874683206349305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15475130974037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11606116565694001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12117387453409445,0.13176946832080408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10015716822989787,0.19319976400431926,0.0,0.0,0.1758168464971529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10235504340228854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08892119803702199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1683163464278027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21950779108826504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MauveSweaterVest,2020/04/19,DAE become extremely frustrated when a new skill doesn't come easily to them? Sometimes I get this irrational anger when I'm not automatically good at \[thing\] and it makes me want to give up straight away and fall down into a pit of self loathing.,10.562978723404253,8.211011787234042,9.392021276595743,69.58250000000002,58.787234042553216,13.655319148936169,40.52127659574468,12.161744961471696,4.606965957446809,202,8,39,5,2,63,42,47,0.33,0.613,0.057999999999999996,-0.9440000000000001,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,1,1,2,3,2,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,7,7,4,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,2,0,0,0,0,3,1,8,7,0,11,0,0,0,0,3,6,0,0,3,22,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31360838522868395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3686468200259216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2875320810143988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1743924395158694,0.3202035114018203,0.0,0.2799687264224097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22280861941236935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3223782018413339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34821764621283663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3301286266811708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22175644101240535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1968790527502456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,damag3d_g00ds,2020/04/19,"I think the lockdown is increasing the suicide rate for those with MDD, BD, and BPD. I don't have any proof, but anecdotally I think I have seen some stuff that makes me think that people suffering from diagnoses where depression and or suicidality are a component of their disorder are attempting and completing suicide more often now due to the increased stress we're all facing now.   I wonder what you guys think and have you seen anyone legitimately comment or report on this and have some numbers to back it up?  Basically looking for news articles, print or video, that backup up this theory.   What do you think we should do about it if it's true?",11.137,8.641742033333337,10.290000000000003,64.03500000000003,57.83333333333334,14.266666666666666,40.66666666666667,12.688352899677879,5.049966666666666,524,20,92,14,5,168,82,120,0.191,0.762,0.047,-0.97,0,1,0,0,0,2,10.0,1,3,1,1,6,4,0,1,4,0,11,2,1,1,3,27,21,10,3,2,5,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,12,7,0,0,6,1,0,2,1,3,0,0,2,3,11,1,11,18,6,10,0,2,3,0,7,4,0,8,4,68,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11534815327676283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860300541016085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13042814306124256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136318166932462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1778444787841111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14609439059683876,0.17216182917012435,0.0,0.0,0.1944004568747028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16795154036925933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424389899068268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11322339030858446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11759390195356167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1943003779616745,0.0,0.19417555902112976,0.556613803919324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5434317062647585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18394682941221016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ThisBowler4,2020/04/19,"Reddit is anti-mentally disabled There are all these rules and functions that only neurotypicals understand. Upvoting and popularity are key elements of the website, something that only normals can engage in.",12.180625,14.321680812500002,11.66875,39.90125000000001,53.375,13.9,50.375,13.023866798666859,8.2517625,174,11,16,6,2,57,28,32,0.0,0.841,0.159,0.6705,0,0,1,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,0,1,5,5,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,2,5,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,14,3,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.440376441518904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6836708294455605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34601710807743885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4679048489149185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,acactuscalledevan,2020/04/19,"I feel like I'm going crazy I can't stop crying, I'm hyperventilating, I'm having the worst intrusive thoughts about children and my family similar to ones people with OCD talk about but I've never been diagnosed with anything. Last night I was so scared I couldn't move, I walked into a chair in my dark hallway and instantly an image of a woman came to my mind and now she won't go away. I heard paper rustling in my room last night which I have no explanation for but I knew it was her. She watches me sleep, she looks human but she's not, she's a chair but she's sentient, she is eternal. I don't know why this is happening and I've been dissociated all day. When I look at the curtains in my room it looks like a stomach and I honestly don't know how to explain any of this because it feels so real but  I know it's not and yet I can't explain it so I sway back and forth because it's not real but it's not fake. If anyone has any advice on how to get read of intrusive thoughts or how to deal with this woman chair thing and all this dissociating that would be great.",1.5371240601503755,3.3687601184210543,3.49779448621554,89.32289473684212,79.39473684210526,6.448120300751881,22.260651629072687,7.447530270364453,0.7271125313283213,849,26,189,12,21,287,122,228,0.055999999999999994,0.845,0.098,0.8418,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,12,7,0,1,7,0,17,3,2,3,3,47,39,23,0,3,12,0,2,2,0,2,1,1,3,4,14,13,0,1,10,1,0,5,12,3,0,1,9,7,28,4,21,26,3,26,0,0,4,0,17,9,0,2,14,123,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13598900657140267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1892719668563305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09730638710440197,0.0,0.11451974088788805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1307487324878759,0.10700817685129496,0.0,0.169665611992637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15916602307746028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15286462070764792,0.08974897448253236,0.14347150531588046,0.0,0.1412480698604189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13119100596757413,0.0,0.14073054054850462,0.09941846509678008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07270720904207173,0.0,0.15817970047880192,0.0,0.0,0.15342830079897798,0.0,0.0,0.12306186416802407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22944193638642899,0.2268737278664471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13597655834530034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3505869883153806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14051551043227098,0.0,0.0,0.14790882577980338,0.0,0.0,0.10733150586611108,0.0,0.0,0.2611911215217688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09430082037721628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647848049919704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13920120567140626,0.31679716434086025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13932698686239164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392640482880922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1163469558200853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185438688508276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245407632277323,0.0,0.0,0.22096062167278446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12557345479568965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09885779030923572,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,vishal2397,2020/04/19,"Loss of focus | More breakdowns | Getting panicked Hi guys,
I'm 22yo working, idk why i can't focus in my work anymore. I feel like leaving every thing at this moment . I'm not able to take decision anymore i get panicked even taking a small step always thinking about the negative part. I'm procrastinating too much this is really affecting my health life as well as professional life .
How to overcome this phase!",3.5530769230769264,6.267043987179487,4.702243589743592,78.71567307692307,77.07692307692308,6.976923076923077,28.98076923076923,8.07648339933343,2.3902,333,15,56,6,8,109,61,78,0.17800000000000002,0.764,0.057999999999999996,-0.8631,0,0,0,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,3,5,3,0,0,2,0,2,3,0,2,0,6,11,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,4,0,0,0,3,0,0,1,3,1,1,0,0,1,5,2,8,11,3,5,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,0,2,30,9,4,0.2081727392333148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17321639541256106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4129028392715088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13749613093974153,0.0,0.1753945112206893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10525839184731868,0.14871864650316016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21752332847290035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2061237407124208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.221277887208864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2204248730774088,0.0,0.0,0.29407712423958265,0.10170268517817824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15303091599885554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22543079030433386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336078732049822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31303998497279684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13830071789016204,0.1333886856539099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18717229311168254,0.0,0.1878435179597796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3031044669744226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thr0waway574,2020/04/19,"I need help I think I am going through a mental crisis the last two days I have had way worse physical symptoms for depression and anxiety, I started to harm myself and tried to strangle me. I am scared to call any help like because I don’t want my parents to find out, or my school. I am lost, should I call my mental health crisis line/emergency services. Or should I wait it out.",3.33731601731602,4.802204051948053,4.279935064935066,87.2351406926407,73.41558441558442,7.2112554112554115,27.119047619047624,7.793537801064563,1.5382658008658012,300,11,61,4,6,97,53,77,0.293,0.6,0.106,-0.9531,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,0,5,0,1,2,0,8,2,0,0,0,13,15,4,0,4,2,1,0,1,0,2,2,0,0,0,1,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,1,2,0,15,1,8,11,0,7,0,2,0,0,5,2,0,2,4,39,16,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13279733264786422,0.0,0.1493889312185295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11904108721917732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3988061365964313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1259396689020342,0.0,0.1681946770272548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17848269967802305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11098232163756064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20757387751454048,0.0,0.0,0.2617846009940933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1591795468127134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09540411372487734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21317156730904374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3935933194060476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1447979031732744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21683571586346395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19550969463147197,0.1976341370404848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382204349582376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2029710524083793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12512776150838584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13258253731340702,0.0,0.190760524018722,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11518140840759708,0.15500445017610778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19900735721858556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SpecialistPhase7,2020/04/19,"I can't take it anymore I vent alot here on reddit and I feel like a drama queen but I really can't stand anything. I'm fed up of life, my family are making me live in hell. They are so abusive and i can't move out it's not a thing in my country. But i really can't handle this sh*t I swear. I cry everyday when i wake up, because here's a long day ahead me that will destroy me again, my only happy time is when I'm asleep. I wake up with a heavy heart like something is on my chest. I tried killing myself again but it didn't work. My family know that my mental health is the worst and that I'm suicidal and they just dont care. My friends aren't there for me either. I have no one at all. I don't need solutions because there isn't i just wanted to vent. Thanks for whoever took the time to read this,  please pray for me",-0.0520098322729865,1.81912001648352,2.150185078079818,96.70797281665705,85.0989010989011,5.58982070561018,17.271255060728745,6.8360192770164,-0.2280153846153841,641,14,156,8,19,216,103,182,0.26,0.6409999999999999,0.099,-0.99,0,0,1,0,0,2,16.0,0,0,2,3,11,10,3,0,7,0,16,8,5,1,1,20,29,10,2,2,7,0,1,2,1,1,2,0,0,0,9,6,1,0,2,2,0,2,11,4,0,1,3,1,29,6,17,25,4,22,2,0,0,0,3,9,1,1,12,102,38,2,0.0,0.19395880282919067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16234730915608475,0.0,0.0,0.1347118958815265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19958110348680425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16690398185824973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1798177563892449,0.10557354052870878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1918562404646673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3086452868208632,0.0,0.0827720957921158,0.1169479586225215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264749124564995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17426265645689135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1740064060953602,0.0,0.1939863595882523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1811107961178204,0.0,0.08996573576370892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1156267898009347,0.15995198581590347,0.0,0.14455089749016933,0.1448701487918083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10927162466798927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16497200850379642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739881542162575,0.0,0.12138214616894882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109279692540908,0.12450191423938227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17969443428054874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16374520392381284,0.0,0.20974198197928204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1260249537051419,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17906221939102485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12308270708009528,0.0,0.0,0.1507137986167539,0.0,0.0,0.10875560673516488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19091062729700248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18187772783060216,0.11114216829761676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09655503460257862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11917620787811894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Seitaie,2020/04/19,"How to stop being a bad person. I hate myself so much, why cant I just stop feeling jealous and angry. But everyone is so much better than me and I cant take it I dont know I always act like im better than everyone else but in reality im so much worst and Im just too scared to let anyone else know.

It makes me so angry when people are better than me, I hate it when people talk to my friends, I hate it when im left out. I try to not be angry but I cant it justs comes off as passive aggressive at best and highly irritated at worst.

I want to be better but I cant why is this so hard, my best friend constantly tries to better herself and shes so much nicer, more interesting and prettier than me, All I want to be is a better person but ill never be as good as her. I dont care if she says she is not good because everyone likes her more im just something at the side.

All my friends I introduce her too eventually become closer to her than to me and im so scared of it happening but if I dont introduce them to her maybe she would think im being selfish idk.

I know she is a good person but I really feel so much hate for her whenever she just is a better friend than me to my OWN FRIENDS idk im so fucking bitter and jealous I hate myself.",-0.2596739130434784,1.6691848442028991,2.748000000000001,91.74700000000004,86.42753623188406,5.853913043478261,18.620289855072464,7.1686216300943375,0.2590733333333328,971,26,226,15,30,345,109,276,0.27699999999999997,0.5,0.222,-0.955,0,0,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,1,9,20,37,10,2,5,0,23,2,0,2,3,42,42,33,0,5,16,0,3,2,5,1,1,1,0,3,7,10,0,2,6,0,0,2,10,16,0,0,0,5,44,21,28,34,14,19,0,0,0,1,24,10,1,2,9,160,51,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053078497991162085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0446035418470322,0.06536052619717993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05326209374388023,0.03888587095724965,0.07045118646462085,0.0,0.0,0.13388761106293864,0.394920300790724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503828856944016,0.0,0.0,0.0549495483310598,0.0,0.068934468295022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242846706039596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10657693590709393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18286260764515688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06450841246192691,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2464204796541801,0.058972946962770174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051240274955333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056409400981078474,0.0,0.05714342650976373,0.3148977325998241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673977742984296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5512342917224791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517216100209338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06930816251424088,0.06522972948262838,0.0,0.0623292703680666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042580406881149335,0.0,0.06408575921155919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23446542540285195,0.0,0.049198880524334014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844808794857295,0.1670972421362353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040865590494660216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05072847144755591,0.1277300961193833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04910875830983191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666280944390788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04796223871867702,0.05127208988706992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04087413934842444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08661862147917825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07525014242797577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11512134018184238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04531467787651172,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,overthinkingrose,2020/04/19,"Lonely and struggling I've been struggling a bit lately.. especially since corona lockdown began. What I'm about to talk about happened before the lockdown but it's heightened. I feel super lonely, even talking to friends/family and getting in daily exercise is starting to not make much of a difference. (lonely in the sense that I crave another person's love but I don't have it.. Basically I'm single af and am struggling).

I've always been someone who develops feelings for people quite easily, especially, for people I know I can't be with (i.e celebrities, musicians, etc). Lately however, I feel like I can't be happy without watching videos/seeing photos of a specific person that's on my mind.

I also have this 'fantasy world' that I use as a coping mechanism to make myself happy, where I will have conversations/make up scenarios in my head where I am friends with/dating people. I feel like it's a very unhealthy way of living but I really don't know what to do because I feel so much joy from it all. 

I am diagnosed with anxiety and depression and am also medicated (just for some background information). I tend to overthink a lot, which is also not helping much. I'm just a huge mess and am struggling a lot. Does anyone else feel this way or is it just me? Advice would be greatly appreciated. 

Thanks guys :)",4.416764199655766,6.569277216867473,5.857578886976483,74.18554216867473,72.01204819277109,8.437636259323005,29.52782558806655,9.107695989026183,2.901690992541595,1053,44,174,23,21,355,137,249,0.141,0.6859999999999999,0.17300000000000001,0.9306,1,8,0,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,2,12,19,0,4,10,0,23,5,1,3,1,36,44,15,0,1,10,0,6,2,1,2,3,0,0,3,14,8,0,0,9,2,0,0,7,9,0,0,3,7,20,10,24,36,10,15,0,4,1,1,10,9,0,4,6,122,34,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09847213957929034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417593137032459,0.0838494463831599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10566705611691908,0.07708944888232858,0.0,0.0,0.07046134371067707,0.10325167712654726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06142899432525921,0.0,0.08574859842731743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11001570367779603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08679381297671455,0.10228032398558212,0.0,0.105284123666069,0.0,0.0,0.0881852778918619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418114124585166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11238617097227543,0.06655821714604129,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09499781913917706,0.0,0.305716714490851,0.14398147642366374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07785533343432631,0.0,0.052648626662716864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11110025312051564,0.0,0.09977901632231488,0.08911135812201515,0.21454495536052087,0.0,0.0,0.1034199972977658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06754459802310911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11076208268508836,0.0,0.2273478882577244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09846312558993067,0.0,0.08898253498454915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17134360049413105,0.0909496553326638,0.0,0.1345306924227038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10151606194676142,0.0,0.0,0.10174986423683156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22223457927496015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2095855239546834,0.17597849443804373,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10718223710440054,0.0,0.0,0.06455640737363601,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08335871490023829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08538284127633143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07132614892076182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4213904221423133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16199163558299096,0.0,0.09277628911976593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08703368721169027,0.0,0.08314653120286176,0.0,0.15997447121306382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971395341983836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07158474329114194,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,_Lisa_k,2020/04/19,"Just writing stuff so I can keep myself sane My relation with my parents aren't good enough. They are gonna separate very soon. Now I have been   forced to make a decision to make a choice bw them. I'm with my mom rn so she's telling her own side of the story while my dad calls me and explain his. I have grown up seeing how they have always behaved so I really don't need any explanation. 
But now, what do I do. I'm not financially stable still want to live away from them. 
I don't know much and I'm really confused. But i don't want to live with any. That's for sure. Kindly help me to deal with this shit. I'm already done. Can't handle more.",-0.4909032773780949,1.6874971798561162,1.6835371702637898,96.74658473221426,91.58992805755396,5.1032773780975225,16.355315747402074,6.691623216298621,-0.28916818545163897,504,12,119,7,18,168,90,139,0.106,0.812,0.081,-0.6527,1,0,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,4,0,9,5,1,1,3,0,14,1,1,3,1,23,28,9,0,3,4,3,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,1,3,0,0,1,6,2,0,0,2,1,21,3,14,25,4,9,0,0,1,0,16,3,1,1,5,75,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20217920139824586,0.0,0.15244721428305544,0.0,0.0,0.2491811360766701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17213387826546933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18708012467192556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888837173461505,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1874896746023744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18930716223906172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15366968787199922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280326528858007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16284740762900946,0.0,0.19078729665234245,0.10068862516021562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32355943094129785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2445911115703047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21457589611603886,0.0,0.0,0.13468203623360953,0.1358495132952374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20343544912957615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2347408335473384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1459963904437923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1880646745063204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1463134871652204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20973411806218692,0.0,0.0,0.17267531561535995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16013552461170702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15116923970199436,0.2161265865032234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,20jay13,2020/04/19,"Need advice, I think I have a disassociation disorder I'd like to preface this by saying I understand things like this need to be diagnosed by a licensed professional

So I (19M) have been having a hard time piecing some things together recently. I've noticed and remembered a lot of times where I've disassociated, most of the time it's a few minutes, sometimes it's an hour or two, and on one occassion I zoned in and out of conciousness for an entire week before it stopped. When these things happened, even though I have no memory of anything that happened and to me it seemed like blinking and opening my eyes in a different place, I was functioning normally. I would have conversations, drive, take tests, everything. No one noticed anything, and I panicked. I ignored it for a long time and chalked it up to not paying attention. I brought this up with my therapist who told me it's nothing to worry about because I havent gotten hurt or done anything reckless when I'm in a disassociated state, and I'm probably so deep in thought that I go into autopilot. Which, yes I understand, but it doesnt change the fact that I'm freaking out. I cant remember anything. And ontop of that sometimes when I get into that weird headspace I suddenly switch and feel I've taken a whole new personality. I feel like a different person on the inside. What I like, how I want to act, how I want to speak. And I've learned about D.I.D, but i dont believe it's this because i dont have any alters, in these states I'm still the same person, I just.... i have no idea how to explain it. I am me, I am aware I am me, I have all my memories, but everything else changes. And I dont understand. This happens when I get overstimulated or stressed, or if I'm in a really good mood. That coupled with the dissociation just makes me so paranoid about myself. It feels like none of this actually aligns with an actual illness or explanation so I feel like I have impostor syndrome and am making everything up even though it feels so real to me.",5.29233106134372,6.128339605063293,6.436772151898737,75.97328870496595,68.13924050632912,9.925024342745862,33.67332035053554,10.035473477838034,3.3738880233690365,1604,73,308,38,26,539,188,395,0.087,0.8290000000000001,0.084,0.0145,2,0,0,0,0,0,48.0,0,0,0,0,23,14,0,1,19,1,24,3,1,5,2,70,58,36,0,7,12,0,6,7,0,1,2,2,0,3,32,21,0,2,17,0,1,4,11,5,0,3,8,9,43,8,40,48,9,41,0,1,1,0,9,19,0,10,23,216,75,5,0.0,0.0,0.1523826014950233,0.0,0.0,0.07629535145722535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05309462726577771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2570008885312111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09518929377858716,0.0,0.06643726318862841,0.08796536277812278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16518895078120635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0863900481656637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07924589938817599,0.0,0.16314643415462188,0.08948231510298965,0.0,0.0,0.07989926160487587,0.2745148671560575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0652228110901464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10313744763176677,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2105100934952351,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19738886110392728,0.16733338070046225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0815833898224145,0.0,0.044372615646295584,0.06548677743488386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20712809986043007,0.0,0.06994111588156299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07688952368304075,0.0,0.08358239772745636,0.08813874864168336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26700928624020737,0.0,0.0,0.06909515436165949,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06637776063106615,0.0,0.0,0.10423320244716916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11578531804154912,0.0,0.07540667067931363,0.0,0.0,0.07649829180218805,0.07491640858590379,0.1777809907821702,0.0,0.0,0.1058131743848974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2045198947554037,0.08157321707731094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417956129267913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08886803280435569,0.05001773913342717,0.0,0.07709102276115086,0.0,0.17689067527426766,0.0,0.0,0.062089484595430115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07107781942020397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1544391059431074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062351911443274476,0.06527536386267255,0.08943624889010758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05870373376348038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0906527145728914,0.1556114664973767,0.050028202565676486,0.15341932713538514,0.061983937943838364,0.182107899693322,0.0,0.0,0.07460534315660043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0762692948559112,0.2438408481468391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09210296359739477,0.0,0.06262817612116398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0871695089028829,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07929037100038087,0.0,0.055463232257436934,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rissssalva,2020/04/19,"How do I tell my boyfriend I want to kill myself Trigger warning: suicide, suicidal thoughts

I’ve been dealing with suicidal thoughts ever since I was 11 & I’m 22 now. I have opened up about my depression & anxiety with my current boyfriend & he has been supportive 100%. He knows when I’m having my really bad days & also encourages me to talk about how I’m feeling if I’m up for it. However, lately it has been extremely hard & I simply don’t want to be here anymore. I have lost all motivation for things I used to enjoy & I stopped taking care of myself. I just don’t want to hurt my boyfriend, but I’m hurting more.",6.184888392857142,5.641182265625003,6.844553571428572,78.55937500000002,66.1875,10.439285714285717,36.254464285714285,9.957137785484203,3.444402678571429,502,23,101,10,7,166,76,128,0.22,0.6729999999999999,0.107,-0.9427,2,0,0,0,0,2,23.0,0,0,0,2,10,10,1,0,0,0,13,0,0,5,2,21,30,6,4,4,3,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,6,0,0,7,2,17,4,14,22,2,10,0,4,0,0,6,3,0,1,7,59,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08855889100202176,0.0,0.7199217062743639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0847159432627609,0.0,0.10982451302817377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09246343414462728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.112907005513854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0714182621042293,0.1141682746818698,0.09538036452845283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10017084305896068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0559935681099015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09920145984668463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2370993304164765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12251761418885825,0.0,0.060859913052032075,0.0,0.1249197593301572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12088600041571765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709430022344639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09160543063065077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09258375857436968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3633953863834569,0.12566665679738448,0.0,0.0,0.08326284209776927,0.08900877103193512,0.09679180829912487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07357086243597524,0.0,0.0,0.1758306842426564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09564396963103207,0.0,0.0,0.19595230208807973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,escott1998,2020/04/19,"I don't know what's wrong with me I have a hard time talking about mental health because I'm scared of the reaction. But I had to get this off my chest.
I'm a 21F and my mental health has been taking a toll on me. Especially these past few days. 
My sister turned 17 a few days ago and as a gift, my mom got her a 5 month old puppy. Technically he's my sister's but I love him so much. But I keep having this worrying feeling that either 1)She's going to end up giving him away or 2) Something bad will happen to him. I never had my own dog before, but my grandmother had a dog when I stayed with her one summer when I was about 9 and she had puppies. They gave two away and the other was hit by a car and died. I guess this is where my fear comes from, but that was so long ago. I even almost cried the other night when I was thinking about it.
That's not the only reason I'm worried, I also want to cry at random times especially at night when I'm supposed to sleep. I also get cheats pains sometimes (like a squeezing feeling),  I can sleep a long time without getting tired (my parents just think I'm lazy), I don't even feel like showering or being productive sometimes, and I can't ever enjoy myself because I have a ""gut feeling"" something bad will happen, but most times nothing happens. 
I'm actually trying my best to be happy, I'm supposed to go to university in August and finally get my own apartment and car soon but I can't stop these awful thoughts and worries that everything is gonna go to shit (and its not because of coronavirus, I was having these feelings back in January/February). 
This has been happening for a while (on and off since my parents divorced when I was 14) but it's been so bad lately, especially with my new family member. I'm sorry if this is all over the place, I'm almost crying reading this, I just don't like talking about it to my family and friends because I'm scared they'll think low of me for some reason.",5.655915875169607,4.987782000000003,6.623925825418365,80.11803256445052,67.30845771144278,9.1996381727725,30.46178199909543,8.438071523408619,2.1133592039800995,1532,49,315,19,22,514,198,402,0.18,0.723,0.09699999999999999,-0.9894,3,0,2,0,1,0,42.0,0,0,2,1,22,19,2,3,17,1,33,10,5,2,3,57,76,35,1,2,17,5,7,3,1,4,4,0,1,0,20,16,0,2,12,1,0,6,9,11,0,2,16,7,47,8,38,53,10,55,0,1,0,1,21,16,1,9,35,211,67,1,0.0,0.0,0.07396780156556554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13438050294345755,0.0,0.15180126524385013,0.0,0.0,0.12123108214154152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424292157226804,0.05828389466894871,0.1898642031259248,0.1848227481169708,0.0,0.06449841716682088,0.0,0.07954520371510111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06529316613158799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24978125169765086,0.09776673015661756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07866623745535728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06713442790786918,0.0,0.0,0.10012757605604447,0.06856352629117211,0.0,0.0,0.06812225136132198,0.0,0.14291099985664285,0.0852936934399418,0.1916284400731288,0.05415002402948763,0.0,0.08303287780135263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05856125775356547,0.0,0.15840506541365534,0.072712237855747,0.12923305404432905,0.0,0.06062249272434282,0.0,0.08349991561044,0.0,0.2681112767261128,0.0806882578005581,0.06790001653791998,0.0,0.0,0.16113921409713244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0673726426918143,0.0,0.0,0.04165653518724358,0.0,0.08550331555140045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1110930534082976,0.0,0.0,0.13415748561379598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841055035782281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15277288000396233,0.0,0.0,0.08877356655400932,0.06050114847462506,0.0,0.05572016672715245,0.0,0.05846000153103595,0.07320606944369015,0.0,0.14226236034648534,0.0,0.07273011472333919,0.0,0.07953712949633701,0.0,0.05136260838925425,0.057647706956053237,0.08065429355046197,0.0,0.16832916193888658,0.0,0.07235765772863492,0.0,0.0,0.07919265683407296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07581839676062781,0.0,0.0,0.15586569934031427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177381141843768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07780543947823698,0.06270079356087566,0.0,0.1517052502048366,0.0,0.0,0.1167058297011489,0.14993209238176974,0.08484952634309931,0.0,0.0807904599423032,0.0,0.06337042567778893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056990576188800914,0.12184693722106167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14570467194107048,0.0,0.060175053806676225,0.17679342465455256,0.08711851823132984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05146178825943448,0.08244633272633026,0.07404351956324744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044707556296675374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07306645607075044,0.0,0.0,0.2309292939223559,0.0,0.0,0.08287308805184093,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pants_full_of_pants,2020/04/19,"Quality teletherapy recommendations? I've been looking off and on for a therapist via video conference for a while, and it occurred to me that the present global crisis may have improved the resources and anecdotes out there for finding such a thing.

The only service I know about is betterhelp but I heard some pretty mixed feedback and read some things about them employing people with no training or unequipped social workers and passing them off as trained therapists.

I don't have health insurance but I've never had luck the times I've sought help through health insurance anyway. I can pay a reasonably priced professional out of pocket.

Are there outlets or services online that people can recommend that worked well for them in getting therapy remotely for depression?",8.694377610693401,10.579487894736848,7.385363408521304,68.43405179615709,61.03007518796994,10.72314118629908,40.34168755221387,10.746095033038511,5.001934670008357,642,34,91,16,9,194,95,133,0.107,0.78,0.113,0.2359,1,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,3,2,7,3,0,0,8,0,10,2,0,1,1,20,14,11,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,0,0,6,8,0,0,3,2,2,1,3,1,1,0,3,2,8,2,18,10,2,12,0,1,1,0,6,7,0,6,4,69,14,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17158219506543831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18207742321713372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040807705082998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4235090214706136,0.0,0.0,0.13352853154091754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948246554293987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.167289068740234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15364564226219715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1515107548449764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27621895325444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026716292485775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19926729320033115,0.0,0.0,0.20482453690216945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2030729566696795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22781786534156845,0.4626041845995105,0.2646970397320372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1161629257927798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17911675608895675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14502971561110362,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Adoeable,2020/04/19,"My Anxiety and Depression are Making me Hate Myself Deeply. I've been formally diagnosed for going on 5 years now and I've tried medications but they've all made me too numb. Which is considerably worse because I lack a lot of empathy when I get that numb and lack a filter with my words so I have been on none for a long time. I lost some friendships even during that time. 

Now I've learned some coping mechanisms and have tried to make myself exercise more and surround myself with good company. Including my wonderful boyfriend of almost 4 years now, but my depression has come back full force to where I just cry sometimes and I don't know why. I could even be happy a majority of the day and it just hits like a wall and I can't stop it. Or my anxiety kicks in and I get I swear almost a fight or flight response when having to socialize outside my boyfriend, even with online friends. I know it is miserable for him and he tries to be understanding but I straight up hate myself after every time and find myself apologizing profusely. 

At this point I don't know what to do and I'm seeking advice, medication deeply worries me and I'd prefer to steer clear of it. The apathetic feeling I get on it and with-drawl of nearly all my emotions makes me scared and uncomfortable in a different way. 

I am just really lost, and sad, and deeply resenting myself at this point.",3.2093656716417907,5.507086100746272,4.397516417910449,82.62808059701494,76.05223880597015,8.168597014925373,25.64537313432836,8.954980946260402,2.155928776119404,1097,40,211,26,25,359,146,268,0.249,0.64,0.111,-0.9913,1,0,0,0,1,0,18.0,0,0,0,2,15,17,4,2,9,0,17,6,0,4,3,56,38,25,0,4,8,0,1,1,1,0,6,0,0,0,11,21,0,1,10,1,0,2,4,13,0,0,5,1,33,4,27,29,11,34,0,6,0,0,6,16,0,8,16,144,44,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1143676726706437,0.0,0.0,0.2343922639799835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1790667064573192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899945992089103,0.0,0.07134496260052428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10081742736083096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934449057879484,0.0,0.12856017809671136,0.0754794934894592,0.0,0.20160842314927374,0.11879058040382574,0.0,0.12227925831916132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316514142066954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319064587594574,0.0,0.0986091261987633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059177667379176124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.106970138049258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0904228681119617,0.0,0.1834417610842752,0.0,0.06651509803478625,0.09816548692520392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12458857567552177,0.0,0.2311005658587245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1929622176023747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05717860181422306,0.0,0.0,0.10357448843514708,0.0,0.0,0.25552047368580777,0.09950108172344206,0.0,0.11074369512378546,0.2343702837303433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2358058998848387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22127650030995324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497720775484687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11717493663209075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11930497381392237,0.0,0.0,0.11575306213741453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09784857537341232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20473649047813525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2383823027932777,0.0,0.0,0.12184014609865555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09289890540371078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10560812330557473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12692215652360098,0.0,0.11885724389892265,0.11927119274244882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15073660210477294
mentalhealth,peepeeman369,2020/04/19,"what to do instead of self harm ? my family is so fucking dysfunctional and it doesn’t help i have anxiety and depression but i have these strong intense desires to just cut or even kill myself when i’m in a low point. they come and go tho and i would never commit suicide because i’m a pussy but i want to self harm but i know i’ll end up regretting it later because i always do. i’ve become aware of this, but the intense desire to harm myself to release stress is killing me and idk what to do.",2.868365384615384,4.142303721153851,4.456923076923079,86.26307692307695,74.28846153846153,7.123076923076923,26.461538461538463,7.645422480735847,1.3965807692307697,393,14,82,5,8,132,68,104,0.331,0.527,0.142,-0.9808,0,0,0,0,0,3,5.0,0,0,1,1,6,12,4,1,3,0,9,1,0,0,2,20,16,13,3,5,6,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,6,6,0,0,1,0,0,2,2,11,0,0,0,0,11,1,10,15,0,10,0,3,0,1,4,4,1,1,4,56,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17126319667168122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1574558451455361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2509384710400038,0.2273179509573286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17730033175409954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17727709010493298,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18230018615115665,0.0,0.0,0.13594571610061668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19403384141938992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19028223850032894,0.0,0.0,0.11697530136348105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13796040730526105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4554305540218498,0.0,0.11311624088713773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15874521454372234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1945715038627498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.42944150077692295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2357722666189733,0.0,0.0,0.22513954863459495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12140113633547338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14621243786082871,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,setsekaj,2020/04/19,"you ever push everyone you used to cherish out of your life because you overthink what that thing they said means when it really doesn't mean that and your anxiety creates false narratives of situations resulting in self destruction? because same, it's lonely over here.",12.66744680851064,10.838179255319153,10.898404255319154,58.78250000000003,54.319148936170215,15.35744680851064,46.90425531914894,13.816669648895859,6.675689361702127,223,11,33,7,2,69,40,47,0.15,0.76,0.08900000000000001,-0.4939,0,2,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,5,1,0,4,3,1,0,0,0,1,1,0,2,1,8,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,6,2,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,6,1,6,4,1,6,0,1,0,0,8,3,0,0,2,24,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20517074526804466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32698203786663826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426004566907717,0.0,0.25627469406199793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18943618759772424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5842925205265359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17181451423908933,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.255117726360454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2797890185721275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.301465802806165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17817884207679066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2316369714343844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,S7even_02,2020/04/19,"Advice and help Hello people of this page just doing my first post ever and it would be about me needing some help and advice for what I go through lol. Anyways some background about myself I am 17 years of age and a senior in high school trying to live life the best I can and enjoy it. I have been what seems to be anxiety and I would like to know if I have improved and for any help I could get.

I have experienced anxiety attacks and feel disconnected from myself and my surroundings. When I first figured out what happend to me was when I got up too fast and I tried walking, at first I felt dizzy and tried to play it off and keep walking but I had to grab on to sometime and felt like I wasn't in my body. Luckily I didn't fall and I was able to hold on to something and for about 5 seconds I felt like I was in a dream and I tried to tell my sister and niece and I felt they thought I was crazy. That same day I just couldn't let go of the thought of that feeling I got and I was super scared and decided that it was best for me to go to the hospital, we went and they checked me and even checked my heart and everything was fine. 

The next time (approximately 2-3 weeks later) I woke up in the middle of the night and I felt oh I just woke up randomly ill just go back to sleep and all of a sudden I just thought to myself wait I can't breathe. So I just suddenly felt I wasn't able to breath and I started panicking and I was so nervous and scared I felt reality change into a dream and I thought this is over this is how I got. I went to my moms room and woke her up to explain how I was feeling and from me just telling her made me feel like I was still here and I just got this little hope in me and I started to feel better but I still felt I was going to die and I couldn't breath. So my mom calmed me down and said she gets like that too and that she sometimes feel she can't breathe but she just calms down and relaxes. So little by little I started calming down trying to relax my self but I am still nervous and shaking. So I just felt it was safer to sleep with her just incase anything happens to me and I get the same feeling again.

Still confused as I am thinking about those two events I never really thought about it too much. The 3rd time this happened to me I was watching the Irish men on my computer and I just got this warm feeling on my arms and I was like oh well I just got warm its fine. Then I thought to myself wait im I dreaming or is this real life and I felt my body was like changing and I was getting out of it just a weird feeling right away I went to my mom and told her of how I feel like I'm getting the same feeling again and she says let's go for a walk. We go and i start to feel calm and safer but I got really nervous thinking about what I felt. Later on that night my mom explains to me and says my sister used to get like this and its perhaps anxiety. So I call my sister and talk to her and explain what I felt and she said yea I probably have anxiety. 

After these events over the course of 4 months I would get these feelings of me getting disconnected from myseld and surroundings and get the so called anxiety attacks. There has even been times were i felt like ive broken down and cried because I feel like im going to go insane and lose myself. So far the way I feel safer is by telling my girlfriend right away of how I'm feeling and just by I feel like I'm still here and im safe. When I get anxiety attacks I always feel I can't breathe and something is wrong and I'm going to die and I feel disconnected from my surroundings and nothing is real and I'm in a dream. I feel I've improved from when I first got it to now as I dont panic or try to over think as much when I get them. 

Sometimes I passively feel disconnected from myself and surroundings. I feel like I also lose my emotions as well and I don't feel like I could laugh or anything. Recently I've felt that my anxiety comes from me always overthinking everything, even tiny little things that don't really matter too much. Since the end of March to now I've been to the hospital 3 times due to me thinking I can't breathe or swallow. All times they said I'm fine even xrayed me and said I was fine and getting 100 percent oxygen and they say I have anxiety. During this time I would be at home thinking about me breathing and swallowing and I'm always in manual breathing mode (sorry for if I turned anyone to manual mode) and I couldn't stop thinking about breathing and swallowing. Anytime when I felt I cant swallow I would get scared and think something is wrong with me.

Today I feel like ive improved but at the same time I feel like i haven't. The last time I got an anxiety attack or felt disconnected was last week and last week I had about 3 of them becasue I felt i couldn't swallow or breathe. Now I have tried to distract myself and I know I could swallow and breathe and try not to think of it too much. I still feel disconnected from my surroundings but i feel distracting myself and not thinking about that makes me feel like myself again. It still scares me when I think about how I am living and if this is actually real life and I feel that I'm so used to being disconnected from myself I don't know how it is to truly feel like myself. I also sometimes feel I forget things easily now and this also scares me.

So that will be the end of this post I would appreciate and advice or feed back to me. Sorry I find it hard for me to explain this and I feel I would jump on to different topics and this post would be all over the place. Thank you for taking your time and I would be open to answer any questions you guys have and I will try to respond asap. Thank you and have a wonderful day/or night.",1.8504393918259159,3.601623742951908,3.2181387455247155,92.06505579578743,78.15422885572141,6.26628849521861,22.879651586305233,7.149701050059347,0.6405274964740162,4518,140,1005,53,107,1473,328,1206,0.10300000000000001,0.731,0.166,0.9975,1,0,3,0,0,0,50.0,2,4,6,10,84,65,4,13,28,2,90,29,17,10,5,261,235,135,2,21,34,7,53,18,1,11,5,7,2,3,49,96,7,6,79,7,2,20,20,22,2,6,71,62,195,43,134,137,17,148,0,2,1,0,58,51,0,18,91,696,244,3,0.05289449922418735,0.0,0.025808700559781524,0.0,0.0,0.07753183869592077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06344956787898963,0.06601869096676594,0.0,0.0,0.03597007330211308,0.0,0.18208866207551536,0.0,0.0,0.01849253185795836,0.0,0.04352766595808801,0.0,0.0,0.12035025793070595,0.04969612320156402,0.040672604920815,0.0,0.01612199788903633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05550951360451372,0.02339044306895388,0.0,0.05875386442679234,0.0,0.0,0.05401119766744377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055955366618883715,0.022781963741297782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06334793034890872,0.0,0.02905106183171626,0.03411257614685891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054896139230265976,0.02763174683449845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03099597957653662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029749596111126056,0.046848826393484234,0.0,0.0,0.0698726357553451,0.02392305140775397,0.0,0.0,0.04753816524570073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4279207697539832,0.18893920407290066,0.4316896208732163,0.0,0.02417230701312877,0.08998406803785261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1796287525804976,0.0,0.15030581431659315,0.0,0.19037053365320228,0.0,0.0,0.026186935146633526,0.04677443097718258,0.0,0.023691540883204985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031340118128873114,0.0531811017926726,0.027942971269940203,0.026528747737856344,0.026268086326763508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08570270385564108,0.0,0.0,0.0235075306329458,0.0,0.0,0.043604150194430036,0.06467411490372124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05408820916869731,0.05604142361734067,0.23257422464922875,0.10602836821235123,0.04670681188710635,0.0,0.0,0.05917541474295609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02502502705070634,0.017653744482331424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12389879641267368,0.02110994231889393,0.0,0.07776708609772423,0.019610300475484437,0.020397749322068014,0.0,0.028126949999966826,0.07445685652538236,0.0,0.02537684928907035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.031030149041530963,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.018335192861744884,0.0,0.02763174683449845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07598746330006034,0.0,0.028514608220906176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029626972302959808,0.0,0.0,0.09030828029508464,0.05082835596611261,0.0,0.02611346837197584,0.0,0.0,0.04517161332682236,0.10062956296129036,0.06309574321922669,0.13239155310851974,0.026766028558708528,0.0,0.02407658275762117,0.02759024927623167,0.0,0.0,0.021877438177460386,0.0,0.05293269899893945,0.0,0.0,0.06108115454130261,0.10462802448312866,0.059211061345043274,0.07487799759474642,0.0,0.14784565392466134,0.02211108490515592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.019885040307469518,0.021257297434190917,0.0693481856120496,0.04869814828553858,0.0,0.0,0.03514075494268667,0.16946329658295098,0.0,0.125976972033321,0.13879443538763372,0.0,0.0250689002365363,0.025271480376338508,0.0,0.16160351799197392,0.02876701305905176,0.025835119935344902,0.0,0.0,0.04568386433521506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.020992595723939803,0.06364316509595104,0.0,0.0475585071765288,0.07355059606219938,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.028680914040179164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16908630584193032,0.05783183138405115,0.0,0.01703116164304921
mentalhealth,eeybb,2020/04/19,"Life is confusing and I feel like I’m slipping into bad habits Background: 18F adhd
 So I’ve been smooth sailing for a while now (few months) on my current mess and feeling pretty good. Of course what’s happening globally has effected that in ways that I don’t really understand? I’m super introverted and an artist with not too many friends and I like it that way. I’m used to being home a lot and by myself and I’m perfectly comfortable like that, obviously I still went out way more so this is still a huge adjustment. Overall, I saw the quarantine and being home as a positive for personal growth and I was trying to make the best of it and do things I don’t usually have time for. Anyways, I’m about a month in now and I’ve realized that when I take my meds I’m actually getting way too wired and my “drive” to be productive is almost too high...I can’t focus on anything and I end up making lists and planning all day and getting sidetracked but never completing things. I’m having trouble finding my focus. I want to do everything all at once. At the same time i’m procrastinating a project I’ve been working on for 2 years that is due mid-may for my AP testing. I’m terrified I won’t finish and I end up getting so mad at myself whenever I don’t work on it...which is almost every day. The thing is I feel (or at least i felt) really good, I was so motivated and positive and I just am so overwhelmed and confused now about how to get back to that place. At the beginning of quarantine I was working out every day and super confident and it’s been so hard to keep up with my routines because they take so much time and I end up procrastinating and things take all day. I’ve been having trouble sleeping which makes some days really gross and I just don’t feel good. I seriously have SO MANY things I’d love to do. I’ve started just about every different project or hobby I can at my house and I can’t focus on all these things. But, I just keep doing new things to distract myself from how much I need to do. I’ve never had issues with food before and I naturally eat super healthy with no problem just because I like to. But since Easter, we got lots of candy in the house and sweets are my weakness lol. I’ve never beat myself up about it so much though. I don’t stop eating all day, I always have something to snack on and I’m not even hungry. But I can’t stop. And then I just do it to self-destruct and I end up getting mad that I’ve done it again. If you’ve made it this far, thank you for listening haha i’m sorry if that was hella disorganized. if anyone feels similar or has advice or anything pls comment i’d love to talk to anybody about this lol.",2.3651980874316934,4.178534100182151,4.152592213114756,85.6620030737705,76.85063752276866,7.270810564663023,24.73440346083789,8.144726394080802,1.4750731329690343,2107,73,435,37,48,711,238,549,0.113,0.7140000000000001,0.172,0.9868,2,2,1,0,0,0,45.0,1,1,1,12,36,33,2,4,13,3,44,9,1,9,10,100,89,56,0,6,19,0,8,4,1,1,2,1,2,1,29,37,4,4,12,1,0,3,15,14,0,0,15,11,47,19,61,70,16,73,0,1,1,2,10,28,0,14,42,289,76,9,0.0,0.0,0.06806926578599723,0.0,0.08383004327952495,0.06816222463228593,0.0,0.0,0.13969592784740345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0580404246732114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048773205887667696,0.0,0.11480222556273785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05363606641393904,0.058241183471204015,0.08504206221216976,0.0,0.0593550140463863,0.0,0.07320190000354397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07313512292311004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2699110720828866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07287746684697034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07138195595728615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14275030409707246,0.0,0.0,0.2471232682291321,0.0,0.0,0.046071469225870826,0.0,0.1763107682564257,0.0,0.06268986688409338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17634709891886616,0.049831849804459566,0.06697421207697997,0.0,0.06375335274730763,0.0,0.08434609984937705,0.0,0.05389131127895328,0.0,0.1822163879294948,0.0,0.0,0.17551755180511755,0.05578817380702054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06168270980554893,0.0,0.062485354096895734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736983070425513,0.13993671448548922,0.0,0.0,0.1609721389704476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07280443718898294,0.0,0.12400007097761495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04926889610215382,0.13631197033255738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860370898899268,0.12591035116124952,0.06600236279508062,0.13968282779317956,0.14143801834629033,0.0,0.0,0.07748031336095347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11135301222186184,0.0,0.15383034610925794,0.05172126942683696,0.1613943890926076,0.06736827771870006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07428510479177255,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06090598680796869,0.07287746684697034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07096429443614964,0.0,0.0667445926488662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13405746111503902,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0727680189374722,0.0,0.0,0.05770074128950566,0.0,0.06980378474660212,0.0,0.0,0.053699582605960985,0.0,0.07808323132795603,0.04937182238208745,0.0,0.11141032613059376,0.11663394766734048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573376494549715,0.0560651484792223,0.0,0.06421956795647157,0.0,0.0,0.3243874614689645,0.0,0.06853237084174897,0.0,0.122021322359029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0473579864307459,0.0,0.0,0.07261575945086819,0.0,0.06024455001835857,0.07682352606219768,0.0,0.04114236827092,0.22146803936307036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0646621095920679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15234393899297538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04491890887104825
mentalhealth,throwaway990191,2020/04/19,"It’s not comforting to know that I’m not alone in the way I feel. I know people always say oh you’re not alone there’s so many other people who feel the same way you aren’t abnormal or alone or whatever for feeling this way and be being so depressed and somehow that’s supposed to be a comforting thought, but it’s really not.

How is it any different to me that thousands of people are suffering just like me when my suffering doesn’t care regardless whether I’m the only person in the world who feels like this or if everyone in the world feels like this. I’m not alone, so what?? I am alone it doesn’t matter if someone else feels the same way. If anything that’s even more terrifying a thought that we are all so cumulatively helpless and that if so many people are suffering the same way then there’s no real hope. Just a thought.",5.577529411764708,5.563123458823533,6.171764705882352,81.09294117647059,67.35294117647058,9.858823529411763,31.117647058823533,9.642632912329526,2.6236941176470583,668,24,138,13,10,218,83,170,0.165,0.684,0.151,-0.8301,2,5,0,0,0,0,10.0,1,1,0,0,13,12,0,0,10,0,11,0,0,1,1,41,27,20,0,6,16,0,6,3,0,0,0,1,0,1,17,4,0,0,11,0,0,0,9,5,0,1,3,7,8,7,8,21,5,12,0,5,0,0,6,5,0,9,5,92,25,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5558990700700981,0.0,0.0,0.08932186269614377,0.0,0.0,0.07300009819065402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0883379875893594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10944810613440874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09245839275019814,0.0,0.0,0.11215546964032368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967520555361456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07090212505461242,0.0,0.0,0.102575301051028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32566925094394283,0.15337839690836005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662046001566887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11799094649148888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1573339508597512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2176673814134412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08164274196395056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2976854382275225,0.09373184675448226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12218515233667875,0.06876966759249023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08536717753728272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09095533428140568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2556661825777671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4260379277665481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,HopefulPerception5,2020/04/19,"I've been told my scars make me unattractive and I'm starting to think I should cover them and just never let them show again. About two years back (I was 16) I had some suicidal thoughts and had a major self harm addiction. Like I couldn't go through the day without it. I wa also dealing with anorexia, depression, mood disorders, anxiety etc. I was kicked out of my family home. I was hospitalized too many times to count for stitches and procedures and had a couple inpatient stays as well. I basically lost everyone in my life because of my mental health or lack of mental health.

This left me with scars. A ton of scars that are heavy concentrated on my inner for arms and upper arms but also on my thighs, chest and side. 

During my struggles (or the thick of it) I covered everything up as I often had stitches in my arms but as I began to recover I began wearing shorts and short sleeves again, comfortably. However people have always looked at me like I'm insane and tell me they make me really ugly and how no one will ever care about me with a body like mine, that I ruined it etc.

I was normally able to ignore it but now that I'm going away to college I'm thinking I should try to hide my past, my medication and the way my body looks especially my arms. I guess what I'm asking or saying is should I cover my arms? Are they gross or scary?

Sorry that was a long rambling post.",3.54620553359684,5.189763159420295,4.736785243741768,83.4470158102767,73.20289855072464,7.9167325428195,25.2266139657444,8.575989854853784,1.7103898550724643,1096,35,216,20,22,361,159,276,0.165,0.773,0.061,-0.9806,1,0,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,0,4,1,14,14,0,1,8,0,20,15,10,3,2,42,42,24,1,6,9,0,1,3,0,4,5,1,1,1,10,15,0,1,3,1,0,2,4,7,1,2,15,4,41,6,31,21,6,34,0,3,2,0,10,15,0,7,17,149,51,1,0.11657261089172755,0.0,0.0,0.12708135263560988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18644614962718045,0.09699775069907253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08917772825890434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10897965503801707,0.0,0.1095238052684727,0.08963714217789673,0.0,0.0710615816117412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589717825734838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11885354596136673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1289853767052012,0.0,0.07517969021368133,0.1201812431432039,0.10040381894552493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13360231145929655,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600185514446399,0.0,0.1054466004594921,0.0,0.11139012531653658,0.10476794602414267,0.0,0.10989428285203454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250180237328196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12841787340959784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2478224683937329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11693183347412388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1266564828207181,0.11920339267281894,0.08233868253450186,0.17085446811504001,0.0,0.0,0.1031630923130439,0.195783267173544,0.0,0.12725277533582566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15562624594277333,0.11818633064944135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11743464141274496,0.2349555472163325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990798399320574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11421640796504845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07899261806311715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11128174756201868,0.08081677053176807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11164433758834404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746793995495398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09270321906310064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12161065670182968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304934939530659,0.08251069398510022,0.12425089273116223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1218670035314212,0.0,0.12751151581518466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10188960006518157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1493900441273893,0.0,0.09254563176103747,0.06797442686307036,0.0,0.0,0.11139012531653658,0.0,0.07914515076833575,0.0,0.11387450217836315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09252991251744952,0.0,0.0,0.10481277699942344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1123718369963048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07506893943109426
mentalhealth,mildlymolded,2020/04/19,"I finally burned out and now I feel empty So I've been working from home for the past month during quarantine. Work has been extremely stressful. They're overworking us to the bone and taking advantage of the fact that we're at home by making us work crazy hours. I'm also working a second job online just to stay afloat and so I've been working 14 hour days. And besides the fact that I'm working almost all the time They decided to add 2 extra unpaid working days per week for us at my job which was essentially the final nail in the coffin. And I finally cracked. I finished my shift just past midnight the other day and I was completely disassociated. I didn't want to do anything that used to bring me joy before. I didn't feel like doing anything. I love video games but now they feel pointless. I love binge watching series but that felt unnecessary. I thought it would be just that night but I've been feeling that way ever since. Nothing feels worthwhile anymore. Like... what's the point? What am I even fighting for? I work and work and work for a less than minimum wage job, struggling to make ends meet and for what? I don't see a way out anymore. Especially not now. I know the whole world's in disarray and I'm sorry if I sound like I'm whining when a lot of people have lost their jobs :( but I'm just so exhausted.",2.071048517520218,4.503644362264153,3.285222371967656,88.36610849056606,80.84905660377359,6.049865229110512,23.80390835579515,7.310402129719878,1.0712398921832884,1056,38,210,15,28,341,148,265,0.13699999999999998,0.809,0.054000000000000006,-0.9572,6,1,0,0,2,0,25.0,3,0,3,12,14,13,1,2,14,0,16,4,1,3,4,43,39,20,1,3,10,0,6,3,0,1,1,1,2,0,12,13,0,0,9,2,1,1,4,6,0,1,11,9,24,7,22,26,5,33,0,2,2,2,11,8,0,3,24,124,36,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08050416943312616,0.0,0.0,0.0642920041648288,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15946085072014846,0.0,0.0,0.13231678203387798,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06841038505740067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08429282682807987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554473930387594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07120627552621862,0.0,0.0,0.05310026457813461,0.07272205180385656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2032511176118515,0.05743433959229575,0.07719198977059566,0.26420700192329755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.161285860603763,0.0,0.15834613497255767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31911928242222026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04418309374857729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11783108632274387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08776084653114484,0.06834911533195794,0.14511959510146952,0.0,0.10732882682014724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06417067341139647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544543942300168,0.0,0.07714135279667053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1534926109663942,0.05573590184625603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07599944029741064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06406455739829428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06650373170879342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899958328288321,0.0,0.08569057531012722,0.0,0.0,0.09209241818541708,0.0840465079516464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06044717735685124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06382480039963175,0.04687908164068917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2901165432662757,0.06943563118601713,0.0,0.0,0.047419165858295004,0.12762791900693374,0.06448817182199744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08975835823308613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5852865561071678,0.0,0.0,0.05711043611905953,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway73863,2020/04/19,"I can’t stop obsessing over people/things Whether it’s a special interest (usually a macabre topic which involves violence of some kind), or a person whom of which I don’t even have to know, but nonetheless become completely fascinated with and will religiously check on them/see what they’re posting every hour of every day. They have to be interesting in order for me to do this, and it becomes a bit of a project for me. It’s not even in a “I care for them and want to see if they’re doing okay” kind of way, it’s more of in a possessive kind of way. No I do not physically stalk people, that would be creepy. It’s just online. I like studying their thought processes. It has no emotion attached to it, but I become very fixated on them so much so that it honestly scares me a bit. It can’t be healthy but it’s the only thing that (temporarily) cures my boredom. It’s either fixating on people or violent criminals/cases. I’m not sure what this could mean but I just felt like sharing for some reason.",4.354243070362472,5.365264527363183,5.683912579957358,79.88339552238807,70.39303482587064,9.32494669509595,30.27754086709311,9.606745405546679,2.7527779673063257,794,32,158,18,14,267,112,201,0.147,0.695,0.158,0.5353,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,4,0,6,16,1,2,9,1,15,0,0,1,1,30,23,13,0,4,14,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,1,22,4,0,1,5,0,1,0,8,3,0,0,2,2,15,13,24,15,7,15,0,0,1,0,8,7,0,5,6,112,37,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.449950658645726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2965230288148855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13846003286122172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14238668030194812,0.0,0.0,0.10842750694432796,0.0,0.0,0.0875815886962796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1527599017598674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17939297282926206,0.0,0.2288394776694068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13039201060078415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13373842915110293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4242532391044333,0.07463368214190644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13269280316569626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14792909051332775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09983070348303497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10328416940651804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882971620754789,0.11857779033499878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1300615688510981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1396279240352337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13596232077335746,0.0,0.10821727062922516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11353724417967755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1279925572415329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09022136389281556,0.0,0.0,0.10781227527667467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495676278084166,0.11205155465773717,0.08010002586603139,0.2155879258659471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09647043189303127,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ItsJustMyLifeOkay,2020/04/19,"My Friend With Munchausens So, I have a friend who seems like he has Munchausens. I'm not a doctor but ... He's convinced he's dying of organ failure. He has been seen at UCLA, Cedars-Sinai, USC, & The Mayo Clinic. He refuses to believe that he is okay and he has been taken to the psych unit at UCLA as well as the Mayo Clinic in the past 30 days. The thing is he has mental health knowledge so he knows what to say to get out of the psych unit and immediately goes back to to being ""physically ill."" It's all very disturbing and came out of nowhere. It's been going on for only a month too. His friends and family are deeply concerned and it's really difficult right now. Is there anything we can do to help him? We're deathly worried.",2.044942857142857,4.05554338,3.2992380952380955,90.49200000000002,78.53333333333333,6.152380952380952,22.047619047619047,7.1686216300943375,0.6079619047619049,577,17,123,7,14,187,97,150,0.096,0.769,0.135,0.5439,0,0,0,0,0,0,22.0,1,0,0,0,7,9,0,1,9,1,15,5,0,0,1,17,23,10,2,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,5,1,0,0,7,10,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,2,1,0,6,2,5,7,20,16,1,14,0,0,1,0,19,7,0,1,6,71,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.215656639439138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637905930344789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530472616347467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2242466789630894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2276454444331877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283624783007609,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20656910959770525,0.0,0.0,0.2037229291506686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1876344855622307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4613267621172562,0.0,0.10398868172904033,0.0,0.11311738372165388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21156715418230407,0.0,0.0,0.13341038791644338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10938559744182064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972394844656852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20058260579072867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1588695325251094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15137670087525446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1900034552696372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12750827752742155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16997661538407466,0.0,0.1582823088466575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18119592132101092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223142029448642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16422647119589526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17895827682969884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2021318597347813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ruebennett420,2020/04/19,"does anyone else like jump from thing to thing? so that title made no sense, but i have no idea how to put it in words. basically almost everything i do, i have a change of heart on it. For example, i was just obsessed with euphoria for like a month but now idk anymore. like deadass just today or yesterday i looked at the cover of it and i didn't feel that strong love and obsession i had for it, just days ago. another example is i play on the basketball team, but the entire season, i didn't even like basketball. i loved football. though, i just recently started to like basketball again and dont really care for football anymore. its hard to find more specific examples but the best way ive found to put it is I have a change of heart on a lot of things in my life. I've been diagnosed with inattentive ADHD and depression just fyi. so am i being a hormonal teen or is something actually going on.",3.1744999999999983,4.9590007833333365,4.757777777777778,82.32500000000002,74.5,9.244444444444444,27.0,9.725611199111238,2.6290666666666658,711,27,143,20,15,239,106,180,0.122,0.6679999999999999,0.209,0.9713,0,0,1,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,3,12,14,0,2,9,0,16,6,2,2,0,26,25,14,0,0,11,0,2,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,11,6,0,0,4,2,0,4,5,3,0,0,7,3,15,11,23,17,3,22,0,1,1,2,3,7,0,4,15,100,26,1,0.0,0.0,0.12637704252283494,0.0,0.1556384195113059,0.0,0.1147973183958414,0.0,0.12967936417399942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13579604192322398,0.0,0.0,0.25686597200672323,0.09055207872844052,0.1326919627646821,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13590626434233194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320377706124887,0.0,0.27399572985844844,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08351924724550194,0.0,0.11154144630111648,0.13144364643317755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11332966142601755,0.0,0.15177750696542824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081838200651465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08553604858545574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11638967868214775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06548102013885013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11836414096855465,0.0,0.0,0.14199424903161034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0736000026166301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11600998131203955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3069252891883524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14619404414569287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147237458576933,0.31634511317574665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875058843102073,0.0,0.0,0.11009951261551043,0.2337644988385296,0.12253964124991895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336870978490036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26037420701693914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08296346017649048,0.0,0.12786939409133247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09969836395455983,0.0,0.0,0.09166346697828584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25810974121244346,0.0,0.12723684094503734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12275447436243472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10279410062989557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rotmgalt,2020/04/19,"When is a good time to talk about Mental Health with a S/O? Hello! I've recently entered a relationship which is extraordinarily exciting for me. I'm thrilled for whats to come. That being said, I struggle with mental health issues, and would like to discuss how they affect me with her because I feel that they could potentially get in the way, or come off as me being careless or neglectful(?). This wouldn't come as a shock to her because we've briefly talked about social anxiety and depression and body dysphoria, but never anything in depth. I have a bad habit of unloading my problems into relationships and leaning too hard on the support I receive from a partner. Relationships take time and patience and a lot of effort but I feel like I'm in a good spot to do that, but at the same time I know that I'll be struggling with my own issues regardless of my relationship status. I am on medication, I see a therapist and a psych (not recently due to COVID), and am being evaluated for bi-polar or some other mood disorders. Sometimes I can seem totally enthusiastic about something and then the next second I'm dropping into a weird depression for no reason. Around my good friends that's alright because they know me, but I'm worried about coming off as fake to my partner because I try and mask that topsy-turviness.

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TL;DR How can I go about discussing my mental health issues with my partner in a way that isn't overbearing and is considerate of how they deserve to be treated in a relationship?",8.826488511488511,7.771072737762238,8.963156843156845,67.18671328671331,61.13286713286713,11.66793206793207,40.008991008990996,10.7630783206399,4.382055744255744,1217,56,209,25,14,402,148,286,0.125,0.741,0.133,0.5209,0,0,1,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,4,1,11,23,0,2,17,1,18,5,1,5,2,53,37,26,0,5,8,0,3,2,4,2,4,1,0,3,11,23,0,1,7,0,0,7,5,11,0,1,1,5,28,11,43,28,5,34,0,3,1,0,23,14,0,6,12,150,39,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09400398395059306,0.10542240313222603,0.0,0.0,0.0663708520087069,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07139575354097348,0.07723443284373017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07244063711591225,0.21155137313947406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637035048546153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2989428323621581,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06927047618980743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14945182252222378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0994340113278311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0877365152137859,0.06198107135450475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0670302471787773,0.0,0.04532830704272756,0.0,0.04930747669794966,0.21830949372919747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0777195549851853,0.0,0.0,0.2766641743738951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2716634261446428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536160790680308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08477271055367559,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07375990434432758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08740116347517082,0.2622997943104064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06691434752284597,0.0,0.09226981258266964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08301721440664858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08920331251626974,0.1713292648202897,0.4657366759140318,0.0,0.0,0.08252824172835277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06913616368857986,0.0789826759986227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08844048028318262,0.0,0.06679177422206245,0.08580745699377855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813999305442252,0.0,0.0,0.09845375922756792,0.0,0.0,0.0652324173922593,0.1394681506718058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1007345757356066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15177065105115106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05890406933894401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13773145492660685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08810857921104892,0.0,0.061631526388389736,0.0,0.10542240313222603,0.0
mentalhealth,not_turtley_enough,2020/04/19,"Can’t motivate myself to do simple tasks I have a hard time motivating myself to do really simple tasks.  For example, I slept a couple days w/o bed sheets because I didn’t want to put new sheets on. I let my laundry go unwashed for weeks at a time, can’t put things back where they belong, etc. For the longest time I thought I was the laziest person alive and it just sent me into a spiral of guilt and shame.  I didn’t even realize it might be depression until my parents once came to visit a new apartment I had just moved into and we’re shocked about how nothing was put away or set up and that I had lost a decent amount of weight since they last saw me (from not eating regularly). The worst part is that I know I feel so much better when I’m able to complete these tasks yet I still don’t do them and it makes me feel so useless, lazy and embarrassed. I was starting to get a lot better and got on a really good schedule before we had to be under quarantine.  But now that I’m staying at home all the time it’s gotten bad again.",4.671509838998212,4.671587041860466,5.623720930232562,84.2000894454383,69.27906976744185,8.475849731663686,27.236135957066196,8.139509932561175,1.5465098389982113,814,23,173,10,13,269,132,215,0.159,0.753,0.087,-0.9417,1,1,0,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,3,5,14,12,0,3,12,0,20,3,1,4,1,29,38,14,0,1,5,1,4,0,0,1,0,0,2,1,9,11,2,0,7,0,0,8,6,9,0,0,16,5,24,3,24,18,7,39,0,3,1,0,8,11,0,3,18,118,33,2,0.13075961048970147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12285295839823812,0.10054606915751536,0.10917881292632174,0.07970984488769657,0.0,0.11126679762635057,0.0,0.0,0.2312924988222109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14955415964251464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13709896379275466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14468302191931434,0.0,0.08432913129318095,0.0,0.11262306091084567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337997257035102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14583153043803995,0.08636548950519042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13223197590057092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06831649957697232,0.0,0.07431369999770357,0.109674957431062,0.10458040562636084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11713492719379524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13116255080813422,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07186206226589857,0.10658653480183586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13371056096037784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14273956128597662,0.11116714483042288,0.0,0.0,0.08728305536689157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1387152829596731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1389767722753519,0.09612335910354512,0.0,0.0,0.2525768932513208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254673728710654,0.0,0.0,0.1392547176395054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14519307309220328,0.14159991572932568,0.0,0.0,0.11417424824631173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3943485737667232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16753590954177688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10816570102961193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09255232532063236,0.13937234666224158,0.1044247938461503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08687087496838583,0.0,0.0,0.10380852473859582,0.3049879216699102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07712540613151367,0.0,0.10488747223672107,0.15922997873229194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,piupiuboom,2020/04/19,"Daydreaming & Imaginary Conversations So I realise I've always been daydreaming when I'm doing things, and I like to conjure up imaginary conversations with others whom I trust and care about. I waste a lot of time doing this, to the extent that I can spend hours in front of my textbook not flipping a page and wasting the whole day. Is there a certain disorder for this or is it related to anything? I feel like asking my psychiatrist about it but I feel it might not be serious enough.",6.274193548387097,7.200675720430107,6.822741935483871,73.75411290322583,65.98924731182795,10.501075268817203,33.77956989247312,10.504223727775694,3.7068150537634414,394,17,70,10,6,129,64,93,0.065,0.815,0.12,0.4406,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,0,5,0,8,0,0,0,1,13,13,7,0,0,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,9,4,0,0,2,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,1,2,9,5,11,10,5,7,0,0,0,0,4,2,0,3,6,55,18,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2178572070455804,0.28368445592086744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21545752261921688,0.0,0.24476859618148064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2669453815577442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16885378494308909,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30007114824400144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2705325238843056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26477053989432264,0.187045971517936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25784231926665385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2558263943685221,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2225920376278242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27775218596478524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739431654849257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15267074422019744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2923153541372764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,velune18,2020/04/19,"bad trip I had a bad trip yesterday I felt like I was going crazy no way back.... still not feeling well I cant sleep
any help? this is a nightmare
(please just advice and positive things or im gonna cry) 
I've created a new reddit acount cause I cant remember my user I've lost all my braincells i know it",-1.3489552238805942,0.6698189552238816,1.4647910447761203,96.49420149253731,98.25373134328359,5.068059701492538,17.147761194029847,6.742157984588678,0.022404179104477784,238,7,56,4,10,82,51,67,0.28300000000000003,0.599,0.11800000000000001,-0.8497,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,1,4,5,0,0,3,0,5,1,1,1,1,10,11,2,0,0,3,0,2,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,1,0,0,4,0,0,3,4,3,1,0,4,2,8,2,0,6,1,8,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,5,28,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22508408120505247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15663805417742185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17711606088801696,0.3846459924285252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2366210522006124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2530159868670984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11646604830596573,0.0,0.22116104735582487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090665725566342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15439101710747746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2488050674225867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12658799595522527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11253173867590174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2514416430168935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2224623238822228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25284246415354195,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26092857793683594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2305048117059568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18394859490825688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1530266405163178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18283195136764027,0.0,0.0,0.207101941693202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,drew2332,2020/04/19,recently i’ve been feeling very off ever since around march and the corona outbreak everything in my mind has changed.I feel like the days are going by so fast and that i’m wasting my time. I am fearful that I will waste my life without any accomplishments. I keep having these weird feelings that i’m in a dream or that life isn’t real and just barrel roll into negative thoughts.It all started after I stopped using marijuana but that was a while ago and these feelings are different then the withdrawal,4.58930412371134,6.672603432989693,4.9531829896907205,81.14668170103094,71.37113402061857,7.73659793814433,30.68170103092784,8.472884824447931,2.4945680412371143,411,18,73,7,8,130,72,97,0.12,0.818,0.062,-0.6542,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,5,0,9,2,0,1,2,21,19,9,0,0,4,0,4,1,0,1,2,0,0,0,7,6,0,2,4,1,0,1,3,2,0,0,2,4,7,1,8,16,1,18,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,1,13,49,14,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1878873442669689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14413822203696658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18868692108872984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13669491395281735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22145024988126533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1917274989489688,0.0,0.0,0.1904935405570133,0.0,0.0,0.2385108731122199,0.4286878873374848,0.15142232666257954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204602095494727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1883973736418984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.299423397251345,0.10355162301174084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21401643548934207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24125379353776735,0.0,0.0,0.2092822480922797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17533325635105376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500244571695241,0.0,0.0,0.17720578097072484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12359399732334292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1830630403710926,0.0,0.1748869579808095,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2043192589018483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dope_feijoas_,2020/04/19,"Confused about where I am with my mental health I am definitely a lot mentally healthier than this time a year ago. This is probably the most mentally healthy I’ve been in my life and I know that. I do a lot of things to help myself (especially during lockdown) such as journaling gratitude and self reflections, exercise regularly, eat fairly healthy, sleep fairly well and so on. I have always had mood swings but lately they have been quiet often. They’re not as intense as they used to be but they’re still big enough for me to feel like a completely different person. When I’m happy I’m usually quiet energetic and dance around or clean, I try to stay active but when I’m sad I just mope around and cry on and I will switch like that in minutes, hours, days or even weeks. I feel like I’m in such a different state for each mood I’m in that it just doesn’t feel like I can connect say a sad me to happy me. My memory is quiet bad also, when I’m happy I don’t remember a lot of things from when I’m sad and vice versa. These days my lows are usually only for a couple days or so and my highs tend to last at least a good 5 days but I have a couple days a week usually when it’s almost every hour during a day. I can’t tell if this is me going into a manic phase or if I am actually happy? I don’t feel so “gotta fucking zoom” I just have energy to be productive and maybe a little more, but not crazy I’m gonna all of a sudden go for a 3 k run. I find my mind isn’t racing as much but then the smallest thing can set me off and I’ll think I’ll be moving on from a traumatic situation and start thinking about it only to get upset about it. I can’t tell if this is me processing the trauma or if I’m just getting stuck and dwelling on it. Just wanted to express how I feel somewhere, if anyone could be kind enough to give me any sort of advice even though this is a lot to unpack. 

P.s. I hope you’re all safe during lockdown, stay safe and stay home",2.8238848920863298,3.6723694580335753,4.743709832134293,85.8099532374101,73.8441247002398,8.05400479616307,23.25251798561151,8.447377352677275,1.2102310791366913,1532,39,339,26,30,527,202,417,0.102,0.7120000000000001,0.18600000000000005,0.9884,2,2,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,2,0,29,26,1,3,21,0,31,6,1,2,2,71,62,45,0,8,23,0,5,4,0,3,3,4,2,2,17,18,1,2,11,2,0,5,8,10,1,0,4,9,36,14,43,50,13,55,0,4,0,1,10,18,1,20,31,217,53,0,0.0,0.0,0.07521196258533093,0.0,0.0,0.07531467586111418,0.06832041202834963,0.0,0.07717730445054535,0.0,0.0,0.061635112989849535,0.06413076736691205,0.0,0.0,0.05241216622130164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05389111361833624,0.0,0.0,0.13722231524892567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06435259234223596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08080939415829701,0.0,0.0,0.061536381968347674,0.170559237252372,0.08466088288676225,0.2982335892778312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16104940303133392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07886474465985996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1592736691127974,0.0,0.10181175247464604,0.0,0.06493718201291926,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1948516889783447,0.1651825319300791,0.0,0.0,0.07044316882445799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07125258787918942,0.08053474350361851,0.07393527991033395,0.08760452899634867,0.0646450317286024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3281818357892796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08192481245343128,0.0,0.0,0.05166029222086268,0.08143167474897119,0.07731033097437838,0.07655070899135205,0.15180242158135476,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08025949044536508,0.04235721083531613,0.06282464188269657,0.08694150744054907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05443881798146328,0.1506155633412764,0.0772472217702246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26209825006799603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07743001537482773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2330138497774497,0.0,0.07782158564493101,0.0,0.0,0.08191621919640148,0.05665739695421688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11723471799727668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06729702088201375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08309754463144965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08730849007625485,0.0,0.0,0.061291406584714124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0804037689335513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08663308829594328,0.07712848942989399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054552544601341235,0.2464481404809369,0.06155046028333602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1347300982093875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1536112873940062,0.09877031269095124,0.07572366253866644,0.0,0.0449417860170692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05232739125972178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06656617769605785,0.2546544949975866,0.0,0.04545955105190661,0.0,0.12364634789008608,0.0,0.06929772876572822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04963237452868429
mentalhealth,pinkie7_,2020/04/19,"This self-care stuff doesn’t do anything for me, feeling nothing at all doing it Hey,

So I used to be clinically depressed which improved when I started a great degree and met the most kind people. Now I am socially distancing from them and I feel just as isolated as I did back then. I completely lost my ease and light-heartedness. Yoga or journaling don’t do anything for me, I really don’t feel anything during and after it. Painting bores me and so do video games. I try to exercise on most days, go for a run or a bike ride in the forest, then I feel super isolated not having seen a single human for an hour.

I miss the hugs from my colleagues and friends, the casual touches, having a chat with the bus driver or the employees at the bakery, seeing other humans on public transport, the coffee breaks with my colleagues, the group projects in uni, hearing someone breathe in my office or the chewing sounds during lunch break. Now I’m stuck with my parents who are basically strangers to me, emotionally unavailable. I now watch concerts all the time to see and hear humans.",6.893666666666667,7.162631858536584,7.074451219512199,74.76956300813009,64.5609756097561,9.760162601626016,34.15650406504065,9.516144504307137,3.2188943089430886,861,35,150,15,12,278,128,205,0.078,0.7929999999999999,0.129,0.9147,2,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,1,2,8,10,0,0,17,0,13,6,1,1,2,25,30,18,0,0,6,1,5,0,1,0,2,4,0,3,7,10,2,0,4,8,0,4,4,4,0,0,5,13,21,6,23,24,5,25,0,3,4,1,16,7,0,6,12,108,28,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4083511273549171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12718887100346835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17342758962787827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10667475209876208,0.0,0.14246603657637494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1860622180236532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345418844570384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12779414108349338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09400542141524268,0.0,0.0,0.18236337570465197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3728546395271266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1628939824926673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17224742392493553,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1805628385039332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587138476616339,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18366648441711925,0.0,0.0,0.11467337704365822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10596487443867947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26361820307257383,0.0,0.1725570645391477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686130618712589,0.1401500241904582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11707693662131664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1893530763277705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09645098448881194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11230146485087447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14285977353021692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Its_a_burner9099,2020/04/19,"Why do I have no emotions I'm a (16M) and I don't feel anything. I haven't felt any emotions in a long time and I find it really hard to do anything because of it. I don't have any fun when I'm with friends, or family. I have no future dreams or aspirations, I  have no drive to do anything. I don't get mad or sad, and I'm can't express any empathy to anyone or anything. Is there anything I can do.",0.14728021978022102,1.434536846153847,3.239656593406597,92.09596840659344,81.63736263736263,6.308241758241758,24.561813186813183,7.1686216300943375,0.8567901098901101,307,12,76,4,8,111,46,91,0.16699999999999998,0.7340000000000001,0.1,-0.5672,0,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,2,0,15,0,0,0,0,11,21,8,0,0,4,0,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,0,3,1,0,1,8,2,0,0,1,3,9,2,6,20,0,6,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,4,4,46,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3502080438863996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1200300289278175,0.0,0.7063158041635649,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10464353328462446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38619318427969773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182761183458882,0.0,0.0867974413382585,0.0,0.16482239513909686,0.0,0.15689591519017976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262559911827246,0.0,0.08968628539478421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15377539210953778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15191542658292204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1099710427940552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10009746530569354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1548982123395552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plaid-striped-shorts,2020/04/19,"Scared to start losing weight So I have had some problems with eating disorders in my past. I lost 70 pounds in a very short period of time and became unhealthy. After I started dating my boyfriend we talked about it and he helped me through it and gradually got me eating healthy portions without punishing myself or getting sick. However I have gained a bit of extra weight and even though I'm not very confident right now I'm scared to start dieting or any weight loss activities because I don't want to relapse.

What should I do? Any advice would be appreciated",5.545754716981128,7.371587679245284,5.719009433962263,77.65983490566039,68.43396226415095,8.69622641509434,31.174528301886788,9.188382445141503,2.8402113207547166,458,19,80,9,8,145,77,106,0.222,0.6809999999999999,0.09699999999999999,-0.9176,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,1,0,0,4,5,7,1,2,2,0,8,7,0,0,0,15,17,8,0,4,4,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,3,6,6,0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,3,3,12,0,12,11,4,13,0,3,0,0,4,4,0,3,9,50,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14569040041518366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20277454283916332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0908847397709154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16276920547532406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17087167263055567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051154664550192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984734702460639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07789410824799316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11924202040387695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09993282946742192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16679515177851895,0.1627508860513792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1423246209700982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14266034421587406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1273232495903167,0.0,0.0,0.2985330214022093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3165830022807056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1198340279434728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1464815534293312,0.0,0.08693640018148052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24603205487019014,0.08793797649292279,0.0,0.0,0.5446595160686284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14371879898183204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591026008231436,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Throwitawaynow816179,2020/04/19,"Self harm relapse after probably 15+ years. Not in a great place. Help. This is going to be a long one. I am in a queer poly relationship, if you aren't cool with that please move along.

My background: I'm a lesbian. My parents weren't cool with it growing up and were physically abusive at times. I had a rough upbringing. Turned to self harm to cope as a teen. Currently 33. Just left a 9 year relationship that wasnt working, just moved provinces for the first time in my life.

Met a girl on tinder about 7 months ago. Got talking 24/7, really just clicked. Turns out shes poly and is married. Not really something I was looking for but ended up deciding to give it a go because I was really into this girl. Decide to move for a lot of reasons but rush it to see this girl because things are pretty great. As I'm sorting out moving, her wife gets diagnosed with cancer. Girl obviously wants to pause things between us, which is fine, all things considered. Move anyways. We meet, wanting to just be friends at this point but the chemistry is.... a lot. With a lot of discussion and figuring things out we decide to make things more official and actually date despite everything (her wife wants that. Wants her to be happy. Wants things to carry on as if she wasnt sick. Shes legit a great person). Things were finally going great after a lot of rough patches. 

And then corona hits. We cant see each other because her wife is immunocompromised. Which is okay. We've been making it work as best we can. Helping each other (at a distance) with errands, etc.

All of this (plus other mental health things on her end) are finally starting to wear on her. Things are starting to fall apart on her end.

I just moved. Left all my friends and family. Left a great job, a sport I loved (that was my life for years). Left a gym that was important to me. Now with corona I have none of that. And no opportunity to rebuild like I had planned. The last couple months I have been pouring my all into being supportive and loving to her. Because I do love her. And it has been great. I feel like shes the last good thing I have left right now. And her whole life is falling apart and understandably shes struggling. I feel like our relationship is starting to feel the strain with everything going on.

I got into a headspace of just feeling worthless tonight. Just so down and hopeless and lost. I daydream about suicide often lately. I dont think I'd actually follow through but it seems comforting in a fucked up way to have an ""out"".

I cut myself tonight. I havent done that since I was a teenager. Maybe 15. I feel like I'm in a hard place. And I also feel like I cant tell my girlfriend because she already has way too much to worry about on her plate and is barely functioning as is.

I know some of you wont understand this type of relationship, and I wouldn't have either. But when things are working it is so great. I feel loved and safe and fulfilled, so please no judgement on that front.

I just really love her. And I have given my all into this. Like every ounce I have to give to be supportive. Feel like I've put my own needs aside to make sure I'm doing everything I can for someone I love in a really fucked up time in her life. Like I go above and beyond when I love someone, and especially right now with everything happening I've just been trying my best. She deserves that right now. 

It's my birthday the end of this month. I'm going to spend it alone because of corona. And I'm just going to be a whole mess. Was just going to be a day about me when I've been putting myself aside for so long. And now I feel like I'm barely going to be able to get myself out of bed. Past years I usually throw a big party with lots of friends, and now nothing.

I feel like I'm losing sight of who I was. I knew who I was before I moved. I had an identity. Now I feel like I dont know who I am or what I I stand for. 

I feel like I lack coping skills. When things get hard I just shut down or turn to unhealthy coping mechanisms.

Things just suck real hard right now. Thanks for reading if you've made it this far. Not in a place where I want to kill myself, so no worries on that front. Just feeling awful.",1.961692613734648,4.0932327198581575,3.232476503488438,90.2631707317073,79.36643026004728,6.159926195006631,22.49201406907686,7.265973465936653,0.7533243268177365,3275,103,688,43,82,1061,318,846,0.142,0.677,0.18100000000000002,0.9904,3,1,1,0,0,4,109.0,6,2,0,11,41,58,5,2,35,4,72,20,1,5,7,133,155,51,2,12,28,4,18,12,4,2,8,0,1,7,51,50,0,1,25,3,1,26,18,14,0,2,29,25,94,44,110,115,24,132,0,4,5,11,66,55,4,14,60,461,145,6,0.037448268126001306,0.04437007414319137,0.07308821542671311,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033195630194495916,0.0,0.0,0.038785111971784976,0.041325095087220036,0.02994736649067662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13696870000411318,0.0,0.03186571797995124,0.0,0.07859929404739284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041435796403977015,0.0,0.02415103492334529,0.0,0.0,0.038009203868040006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03832258005388623,0.08777818268705137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13267220129910498,0.0,0.04176471796311259,0.0,0.0,0.03155178102671657,0.0,0.13462435485352747,0.0,0.03530289437867997,0.0,0.2461546042678517,0.240777452085598,0.0,0.08204549455029901,0.0,0.03185347773752007,0.0,0.0,0.08679731717910917,0.06924064089826981,0.05869552342670385,0.07184758221925137,0.19154442394515747,0.0314098305830428,0.05990160196952232,0.2890079346904158,0.0,0.0,0.033115379829018236,0.03986437776784467,0.10063887795425247,0.0,0.0,0.03980575785797458,0.0,0.0,0.05020156949849056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037161627752491364,0.0,0.04143096025890045,0.0,0.04116117761046283,0.06105067335291404,0.04224327757787676,0.0,0.20343826445527072,0.0,0.10580327701702147,0.21954398665532165,0.0,0.0,0.06628107772647382,0.031447113638507836,0.04189503313698488,0.040879208367220116,0.15918589198992653,0.2365896684320383,0.03543445676206549,0.07499102929402053,0.0,0.037621818721912136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03773904634434574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967255102256891,0.27861107786830325,0.027528785925566613,0.027767416310147498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.035932623252274774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025375915650975144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0415818700501801,0.0,0.03574860928613032,0.0,0.03269838328058694,0.11737640920229167,0.08221390579697717,0.03540071772903198,0.0,0.0,0.0380983515795536,0.04037556682930411,0.0,0.0,0.07529170549538329,0.0,0.0,0.037458402159193625,0.0426243275966455,0.11995159739612585,0.038503056633778315,0.0,0.16082170137684035,0.0,0.1279224654629774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05968284250560865,0.03409149684332264,0.07813342163845098,0.0,0.0,0.03097759437355333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06345959211787515,0.0288295063602437,0.0,0.0,0.07951823077428594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039149060736022916,0.0,0.04096232722997842,0.0849917017746628,0.03529454952670711,0.0,0.0,0.030099499404494887,0.032731436941357266,0.03447733395692504,0.0,0.0,0.3234265495105971,0.023995338120348483,0.0,0.0,0.06550915888579875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0254249158886752,0.1221988865405808,0.0,0.07796993560655134,0.045045655671939834,0.0,0.04124397668932013,0.0,0.13252775275131962,0.05944938433003374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0836193080158533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08178835560734922,0.07606106812829427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646182753378353
mentalhealth,braidedlady,2020/04/19,"Music, Depression and Suicide Hi Folks. Im writing a research paper on the positive connection between music, depression and suicide. I was inspired to research this topic after reading youtube comments of people saying that a certain song or album had saved their life. If music has had an impact on your depression, Id love to hear your story. Please share anything you feel comfortable sharing in the comments below.",8.142499999999998,10.073816027777779,7.88988888888889,64.14399999999999,62.33333333333333,9.093333333333334,42.17777777777777,9.3871,4.885874444444443,342,20,41,6,5,109,56,72,0.20199999999999999,0.532,0.266,0.5267,0,0,0,0,0,2,8.0,0,3,1,0,0,10,0,0,5,0,4,2,0,0,1,9,7,4,2,1,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,2,0,0,2,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,3,4,5,7,9,4,0,5,0,3,0,1,13,4,0,2,1,29,7,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865240651895759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5856726787855423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460745682760172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25546530337706497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448345800160717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16009854762535874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20457190993400126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1571393564681626,0.0,0.0,0.2488075470589928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2267240089771022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18025125342488788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4958643461161746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bruce_wayne89,2020/04/19,"I've been having nightmares about a thing I have no control over in real life. How do I stop them? Something happened a while back that was traumatic in my life. I know I am powerless to do anything about it and for the most part while I am awake, I have learnt to deal with it.

However, I had that dream again, and it was just agonizing me, that feeling of powerlessness. I am fine now that I am awake, but how do I stop these nightmares?",2.973322632423756,4.40052443820225,3.9528410914927785,89.36820224719101,74.28089887640449,7.3329052969502415,26.19743178170145,7.957251820313856,1.3310532905296948,341,12,75,5,7,110,56,89,0.156,0.795,0.049,-0.8406,3,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,1,8,1,0,0,3,0,14,2,0,3,0,14,17,7,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,9,3,0,3,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,4,1,13,1,10,13,2,10,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,7,63,22,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2263053613532087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21146156935325008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3084410531883741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28351767653914656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390505933096731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2431856675837941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15113534115293706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884877764770646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2978031926191225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3130154512924359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117119835715607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4598323341472901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1827008425672678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,onionsarecool,2020/04/19,"I am diagnosed with MDD and I found out that my batchmates called me suicidal behind my back My mental disorder is not something I am ashamed of. I actively talk about mental health to spread awareness to the people who knows me. So, my depression is not a secret to my batchmates. I am not super sensitive about it as long as they approach me in a respectful manner. I actually would be more than happy if they want to engage in a conversation with me about my disorder.

However, I found out a couple of months ago that my batchmates actually talked about my MDD and me in a negative manner. I was super hurt and I can not get over it until today. I am not sure if it was a one-time event or not. But, I felt really suicidal when I was made aware of it. Did you have any experience like this? If so, what can I do to stop myself from feeling depressive whenever I remember it? I just thought my batchmates were my friends or at least something.",3.61,5.3325290322580665,5.233096774193552,79.62964516129033,73.19354838709677,9.046021505376343,28.529032258064518,9.558583805096642,2.7527961290322587,744,30,143,19,15,252,104,186,0.19,0.6990000000000001,0.111,-0.9599,1,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,2,2,9,12,0,1,7,0,17,2,0,1,1,33,26,15,2,5,13,0,2,1,1,1,2,0,0,0,10,7,0,1,8,0,0,1,7,4,0,0,10,2,34,8,27,14,2,17,0,3,0,0,10,7,0,5,10,118,44,0,0.0,0.0,0.271567122947995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12334193322046835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094622056777488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1069924295061031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1420806282318242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15395915676406285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23968743892688604,0.14122728376556873,0.0,0.0,0.3189400184644893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361086186972667,0.0,0.0,0.07035491530668693,0.0,0.1335991645821147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3051263814605252,0.10750158817586963,0.0,0.07269650943431827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14812038186075124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14790257328274795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1489555307315164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646939055471418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06797827400358146,0.0,0.0,0.1231372354556914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.131660534053513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2804469688772622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11106266834049164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09428694304920217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.096464282706274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08913861149215106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15762197025534366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21423826132716936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11632983417827032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3043998622802281,0.0,0.13114069367755005,0.0,0.0,0.22367585274126225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046405253125301,0.0,0.0,0.13189135766322568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.082070185814308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0988432423765944,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,motsukun-was-here,2020/04/19,Jesus christ i just realized how brave i was for coming onto reddit :8 Which means everyone else who is posting on here is courageous enough to do so as well. One act of bravery is one step closer to change. Good night.,1.8195348837209333,4.414959325581396,2.8570232558139534,89.8966976744186,83.65116279069767,5.300465116279073,20.227906976744187,6.742157984588678,0.4615246511627906,173,5,33,2,5,55,38,43,0.0,0.7020000000000001,0.298,0.9358,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,5,4,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,1,0,5,7,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,2,1,0,2,4,7,6,1,8,2,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,24,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3208201957196538,0.2612408606360417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25334376083109555,0.0,0.0,0.3133597096759889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897881568959705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2543690804300346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3303507067508658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28459901437564616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4110081595087268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2904495055163988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726767869189401,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Kaliragoth,2020/04/19,"A friend is being abused by a family member and I dont know how to help Sorry if this isnt the right Reddit but I dont know where else to turn.

A friend just brought up in casual conversation that their uncle regularly strangles them, I immediately freaked out with worry and started asking in about it and trying to talk about what the heck is going on. My friend went on to try and make a ton of excuses for their uncle as to why his behavior is okay, including statements such as ""it doesnt give any permanent damage"" and saying its just playful. Specifically they described the action as "" He wraps his hands around my throat and throttles me a bit "" and that was after they started sending panicked excuses on their uncles behalf which leads me to believe its watered down. They eventually insisted to stop talking about it so I dropped it after just asking them to think about it.

They live across the world from me so there's no way I can help in person and I dont know what to do as they seem so dedicated to not acknowledging that its a problem.",8.165463414634146,6.906326448780494,8.234268292682929,72.53969512195124,62.5609756097561,11.126829268292685,34.64634146341464,10.125756701596842,3.282941463414634,842,29,158,15,10,275,122,205,0.12300000000000001,0.746,0.131,0.4555,0,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,0,10,1,15,9,0,0,10,1,12,3,2,3,0,29,27,18,0,2,6,0,1,0,3,0,0,1,0,1,15,11,1,1,7,2,0,6,7,3,0,0,3,2,23,6,36,23,2,27,0,1,0,0,29,14,1,2,5,119,38,1,0.0,0.16414681774415385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0942117050736448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12332965059265424,0.2590317215011905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1560867312103784,0.0,0.0,0.15124940405833825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4871022744613375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11573209115377928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1306028416972461,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3211061436972388,0.0,0.0,0.13289984535343954,0.07873526934634867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18572039912184155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2284132869900616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12233303917620235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09247628464060914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12096746882967772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1325637240926355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1183120945210114,0.0,0.11017228130443284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12612128392904634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15508378316840968,0.1961181387274772,0.0,0.0,0.11582534138569545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2227058276709258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08877060652274332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18811864145506388,0.15069134429647446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10996631674686576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12842763308641245,0.12501047550554886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14069372802024774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ajpaulsberg,2020/04/19,"i’m not stable, i think it’s because of my sister. how do i tell my parents? so. i am a teenager, i’ve been put on the pill bc of my mental issues, therapy was suppose to happen but covid happened. my sister, we’ll call her a, is 20 months older then me. shes always been athletic, has a loving boyfriend, and has good enough grades. this is important. fyi, i am not a lesbian! my entire fam is homophobic, while i’m not i’m an ally. i live in wisconsin. it’s a small town, so i will just say 45 mile radius of oshkosh.

cast-
me-op/me
a-sister
mom-my amazing mother

a: you’ve never had a boyfriend, have you?

me: nope. don’t want one.

a: i think you’re a lesbian. ew.

me: nope, i’m not a lesbian.

a: yes you are!! mom!! op is a lesbian!

mind you, i have severe anxiety, shy, acne, and body dysmorphia. it’s been a long road because i never told my parents. i just got diagnosed back in february.

mom: really? i’m not surprised.

at this point, i’m tearing up. 

me: i’m not a lesbian.

mom: i don’t know about that, op. you’re nickname is (insert my intials of my 1st and mid name). thats a boy name.

i’ve had enough of this and go into my *shared* room with a.

i’ve never really had a boyfriend. just talking to guys and not really liking them or seeing them as a friend. i’m 90% sure i’m not attractive to girls, either. i had 1 crush, and that was on a boy.

i tried to listen to some music with the door closed, volume low, trying not to cry. then a bursts in and i leave our room. what’s annoying is my mother knows i am not stable. she allows my sister to do this. my mom has sorta told my sister to stop, but as she is an essential worker, my sister still says i’m a lesbian when shes gone. i can’t stand her. shes always been the ‘perfect’ daughter. 

i tend to go to my grandparents, a lot. i love my grandma and (step)grandpa. it’s a relaxation from my sister and from my dad. lets move onto my dad.

he claims he was an angel, while my grandma told me when he was 18 he blew away the $2,000 he had from his father (died when he was 17). he came home drunk, late, after curfew. he constantly complains i don’t have good grades. yeah, i’m stressed and can’t handle it. he doesn’t know about my diagnosis. according to him, since i’m less sporty i should try and get straight a’s so i can take care of him when he’s old. at this rate, my sister and i will take our mom in but not our dad.

mom-take (insert dog name) outside quick.

me-ok i’ll do it in a minute when the show is over.

dad-you f*****g do it now! when your mother tells you to do a simple chore, jump and sprint! 

dad wasn’t really punished @ his mom’s, as she didn’t find my grandfather until her mid 50’s. he expects us to do everything he asks us to without batting our eyes. sure, he had to do a lot of chores because it was just his mother. he expects wayyyy to much out of me, and too harsh. mind you, he set a time limit on my phone because i was on it too much. when i was doing a sport, mondays, tuesdays, thursdays i was on my phone for under 20 minutes. 

he is also an essential worker, working 15 hour shifts and he needs surgery once this all blows over. then again, he also says that children are for doing things and thats why he had us. sir, you didn’t wrap it before you tapped it. neither my sister or i were planned, after my sister i wasn’t suppose to happen until a was 5, at least.

tl;dr- my sister is sorta verbally abusive, punches me, and is calling me a lesbian, adding to my issues w/stability. my dad ‘had children so we could do chores’, expects too much, set a limit on my phone, and doesn’t understand that i’m not stable. 

please give me advice, fyi i’m typing this on my phone so sorry for errors/format.",-0.3842188832054525,1.7555147186700817,2.087898017902816,94.60201752983805,89.79283887468031,4.6905583972719525,18.248135123614663,6.21433560688645,-0.16103456947996575,2818,79,634,28,96,961,313,782,0.091,0.8320000000000001,0.077,-0.47700000000000004,3,0,0,0,0,0,162.0,9,8,2,7,29,20,2,1,41,2,76,14,2,2,7,84,120,48,1,7,23,29,0,1,1,4,2,4,7,7,26,25,1,3,7,4,0,7,30,5,0,1,33,6,101,15,67,81,13,81,1,1,2,9,114,35,0,7,37,393,127,6,0.0,0.07518909999739473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062011863769212514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10149703723547372,0.10560673239052763,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04854632409287072,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05932604200955938,0.0,0.05962226500109169,0.048796418566453066,0.0,0.1547372259342618,0.0,0.0539993385620924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07048916995968371,0.0,0.0,0.1295984367751781,0.07258073272698218,0.06470116333392124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06857714725582342,0.0,0.05066722643151728,0.0,0.069707252618819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06441003053617764,0.06586091529611984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13114120134114465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05703328355109308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058000809784661565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04902863237523708,0.0,0.033154956094110864,0.06087611017530039,0.07213096326279846,0.1064535923464096,0.050754338678310335,0.0,0.0,0.06283485657608996,0.16835101046125975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06365502682606855,0.0,0.062494799182956175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13247040762278564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10462700229131322,0.0,0.07158505103620777,0.06719442038918524,0.0,0.06489161191529437,0.0,0.031003093648925707,0.0,0.05603587838017822,0.056159637743986884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10790195132312368,0.114549306239145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06395222420034545,0.0,0.12815195742770796,0.5945837539939337,0.05065274689496276,0.0674473781798342,0.13995004590826832,0.04705439605251021,0.14683157604550168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06659004317611514,0.06758226896613227,0.04300178208513106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14092847242904274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06965944618659012,0.0599897150660087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06379429922966977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16261505666829754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1513965629632524,0.0,0.0,0.050568984838755104,0.0,0.0,0.07169114286334265,0.0,0.052494332858563586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07103768590140172,0.0,0.0,0.050678818097300564,0.05305496198686803,0.07269261332798416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11961960690722913,0.0,0.09542725399006777,0.05100632158721267,0.11093275514031484,0.0,0.07257143933471777,0.0,0.042159654889646375,0.08132453741590304,0.0,0.0,0.037003729753479764,0.0,0.0,0.18191474138013125,0.0,0.12925445224699705,0.0,0.0,0.06606355069626382,0.22900180183395685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03743004208155786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05726230500647851,0.0,0.0,0.0611726686050578,0.0,0.04619925304111848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MotherMfker,2020/04/19,"Anyone have trouble keeping up with brushing teeth? Any tips? Once I get up to do all the ""normal stuff"" I just want to get back to my room as fast as possible. Antidepressants make my mouth so dry, I've noticed all kinds of problems with my teeth come up after starting to take them.",4.325892857142858,5.500225517857146,4.620000000000001,86.875,70.60714285714286,7.028571428571429,28.285714285714285,7.1686216300943375,1.3820499999999996,223,8,45,2,4,70,42,56,0.10099999999999999,0.8759999999999999,0.023,-0.6662,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,2,3,3,1,2,11,10,3,0,3,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,1,6,1,13,10,2,9,0,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,4,28,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18175950069721236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1868883240186418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2055217486039438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23023797142370706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2792854373961465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23757066017531026,0.0,0.27833089073188005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17841141193094134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2618775578281044,0.0,0.3042999431587557,0.0,0.2846443755626462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3013179331427805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25575077197473217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18918209231490035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059715448638444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.200961225031325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1576486128473699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NoahJacobBlack,2020/04/19,"I talk to myself but not to myself For as long as I can remember, I’ve been talking to things that aren’t there. My Mom said that before I could talk, I would speak gibberish to things that weren’t there. I’ve had a pact with the monsters that live in my room for a while, I’m 13 now. I talk to them about everything, like they’re real.

They’re not. I know that. But I just can’t seem to stop talking to them. I tried to give one a name one time, but I didn’t like it. Luke. He didn’t like it either.

I know there’s nothing there. I still feel like there is. The pact I’ve had with them is that if they’re the nice monsters, protect me from the evil ones. I’m nice to them, I vent to them. They understand me.

They listen to me. They’re great listeners.

I just don’t know if this is healthy. Is this okay to do this? Is there a way to fix this? Or should I not fix this? I don’t talk to them around other people, and I don’t even talk to them anymore, I whisper or have them read my lips, so no one can hear me.",-0.7485333333333344,1.1122752133333336,1.0835555555555558,103.32400000000004,87.9777777777778,4.488888888888889,15.222222222222221,5.6839178017228535,-1.097977777777778,773,14,204,5,25,251,101,225,0.057,0.7809999999999999,0.162,0.9726,2,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,0,0,10,0,14,9,1,0,8,1,23,1,1,0,0,30,36,12,0,5,13,1,1,4,0,2,0,6,1,0,16,4,0,2,7,1,0,0,12,1,0,4,7,7,36,8,25,26,1,10,0,0,0,0,26,3,0,5,10,138,52,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11865015547753192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10650444785040693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1018043336239748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09552234084320214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902070783694473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10752419531268516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06049328495795162,0.08547042476695142,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11476903227045725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13190288170104686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13484232022794934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19725208735831776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2337991074154569,0.0,0.10564379878409924,0.1058771208931799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14012024144839888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1147972491271252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3242830661554321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08294290905727812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196717950254514,0.13617585110985578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1355281393023582,0.0,0.1138044845247628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10891523362385612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09554419447774808,0.10002391129861136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6731314313559246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589662275926548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06976270727507007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0812273120951078,0.0,0.0,0.1245488543851936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09496420196592592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08498841056364534,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ItsYenn,2020/04/19,"Mental Health and Disability? I had a quick question that i was hoping some people could answer. I have mental health issues, that will not allow me to work, they are to a point where i dont even get out of the house much. I have no source of income and ive only ever worked for 3-4 months, excluding a family owned business which i received no income from. 

How would i be able to have an income?

I dont meet the requirements for Disability because of lack of working. In hopes someone will have an answer to this.",4.447045769764216,5.308212456310682,5.500027739251041,81.8378640776699,70.06796116504854,7.827461858529817,24.423023578363384,7.957251820313856,1.2757140083217748,405,10,79,5,7,134,69,103,0.091,0.851,0.057999999999999996,-0.2792,3,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,4,5,2,0,0,7,0,15,2,0,2,1,17,18,3,0,5,1,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,4,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,5,0,0,0,2,0,11,2,13,11,4,8,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,4,3,63,15,4,0.1684405046922267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1026797682521406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13448603686813265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3948220340397404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11125336474898136,0.1523640798950044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15879071700281014,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08800321157623679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3580887597094735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3345988549339181,0.0,0.19435772715976826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17580812468168305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3394968222005039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1344476038291832,0.0,0.12382315196165625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12810659403827668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11677543731615013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15923072171674074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1886919146757398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14271909301562571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.367880080598009,0.0,0.0,0.11965530173918265,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Space_Plication,2020/04/19,"Repetitive movements and thoughts/rumination advice Hello, my name's Tytus and I'm 16 years old. For years now I've struggled with repetitive movements and thoughts -- though the movements are only when I'm very anxious, and the repetitive thoughts seem to be almost constant.

I've heard of the term rumination, but the repetitive thoughts aren't negative so I'm not sure if that's the correct term. It seems like I repeat anything I think (negative or otherwise) over and over in my head like a broken record until it feels 'right' (for lack of a better description) If I don't do this I get really antsy and irritated. I tend to repeat the thought with different speeds, emotions, and general cadence until I feel happy with it. 

My main issues with it is the awful anxiety that I feel when I DON'T repeat the thoughts, and the fact that when I try to write (essays, assignments, and even texts) It will take me 3x the amount of time because of this loop I get stuck in.

I also find that repeating certain movements/phrases help me to calm down. E.g. counting, snapping my fingers, and jerking my head. Ive been diagnosed with a slew of things, but anxiety seems to be the only thing relevant to this issue. 

Any advice would be super helpful.

Thanks x",5.950320512820514,7.228319790598293,6.099220085470088,77.38293269230773,66.90598290598291,9.26880341880342,33.42841880341881,9.516144504307137,3.231411111111111,997,44,174,20,16,317,129,234,0.136,0.705,0.16,0.9212,1,0,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,0,0,2,8,11,1,1,14,1,13,4,3,0,4,44,35,23,0,4,6,0,4,2,0,2,1,1,0,0,14,15,0,0,13,0,0,3,6,2,0,0,8,5,19,9,25,22,5,31,0,0,0,0,6,6,0,7,24,112,33,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319454350114107,0.0,0.0,0.11884087164366508,0.0,0.0,0.09490834907642004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807064662703199,0.0,0.18157974257687465,0.1340746133658286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0976635236455248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07234622336814879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1049628110978282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1282509126906018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1204576966708518,0.0,0.12399533496404977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349902041802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07838701736084355,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18002451413108292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847136530668618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12401079804104753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12633706146023788,0.0,0.0,0.24359982797767984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909739788405866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2477421613754225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11596210154015335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453469056658854,0.0,0.0,0.18052296815605076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07602944373415918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10135206722314233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3241254302562182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407009890185787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11185449071184862,0.0,0.08923258628802751,0.0,0.0,0.10926459418149062,0.0,0.0,0.15769143029958246,0.07604534867003288,0.11660249245829005,0.4710932964954036,0.06920325944933729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08057592620547266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09792342500087978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08430686331068618,0.0,0.0,0.15285205133105692
mentalhealth,throwaway09264628,2020/04/19,"My mind talks to me? I've had my mind talk to me before. Like they are my thoughts but they speak as if they are trying to be a second person talking to me. Does that make sense to anyone? 

Like it's my voice that I'm hearing and I can tell it subconsciously comes from me, but it's talking to me as if it's someone else.

I DO NOT physically hear this voice, it's inside my head like thoughts are

Please does anyone know what I'm talking about",1.7609736842105264,3.2464581894736853,3.0770394736842133,94.15240131578949,77.63157894736842,5.592105263157895,21.348684210526315,5.985473137389443,-0.041500000000000085,348,9,81,2,8,113,53,95,0.0,0.875,0.125,0.89,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,3,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,7,1,1,1,0,13,16,7,0,2,5,0,0,3,0,0,0,5,0,1,9,2,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,5,15,3,10,12,0,1,0,0,0,0,13,0,0,2,3,49,24,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2135763345425164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12995686982257704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13155819730149385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26729959181722346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12758129946200875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15673887821349294,0.0,0.3442620806529409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08393311275509939,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2238396865249204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194445158854486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3084153934550667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13335270029307114,0.0,0.16764508271844886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294025440921378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6137688045026536,0.13348750190942238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424915828211555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10368956652642758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,DemiBlu,2020/04/19,tics yay so i think i have tourettes. and my tics come everyday but every three weeks or so it's worse than usual and i tense up and hold my breath. i also got ocd. so when my ocd is triggered my tics act up. any way to stop this?,-1.9883823529411764,-0.15069545098038972,0.08448529411764838,105.81143382352941,101.54901960784315,3.334313725490196,12.257352941176471,5.148860815047168,-1.6161588235294122,176,3,46,1,8,57,37,51,0.191,0.768,0.04,-0.8507,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,5,1,0,0,0,1,2,1,1,1,0,10,5,10,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,8,1,4,4,0,10,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,1,5,27,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2858243174313191,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2430541765660021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30788102049112925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3011372061216576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28585709700570144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2988146000963485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2290168366529834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3936416742703648,0.0,0.0,0.2836990642087697,0.2866964241176899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.364236000640164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-IVoUoVI-,2020/04/19,"Im glad to have found a large community of ppl willing to speak on this topic ! I have a couple questions regarding untreated anxiety and depression. The other day i read online that untreated anxiety and depression can cause brain damage later in life. Is this true? Does anyone know definitively whether it is or not?

Also

If it is true, in what context do they refer to as untreated? Surely it wouldnt be inferring the need for anti depressant and/or anti anxiety medication as the type of treatment that would stave off brain damage. Benzos are extremely bad for the mind and body, and i dont know too much about the negatives in regards to long term usage of anti depressants but i cant imagine itd be more beneficial than detrimental.

Correct me or enlighten me in any way you can please!",5.664840294840295,7.426524108108111,6.71943488943489,70.85160933660936,68.05405405405406,10.787223587223586,32.37346437346437,10.832165505486646,4.1233162162162165,640,28,105,20,11,214,99,148,0.155,0.723,0.12300000000000001,0.627,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,1,0,3,11,0,0,7,0,17,5,3,2,4,27,21,12,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,0,10,4,0,0,8,1,0,0,5,7,0,0,1,1,8,4,19,14,3,11,0,6,0,0,4,6,0,4,4,75,18,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12063473146294593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10258320770076752,0.0,0.3461996288740793,0.0,0.0,0.10547786325398234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12595349176091478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16756040019974894,0.0,0.3367970925457316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15496455616574167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1669127124651598,0.0,0.0972858035258967,0.0,0.5197077123048038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13200989638638927,0.0,0.1767951365615823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16539929499712375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1629439413203184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16580648616574292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10654985234529456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13349754835866978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15196555637755674,0.0,0.0,0.1523155492201819,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11089214467874976,0.11185340156829217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1655880568233931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16898658102655972,0.0,0.15089087338989124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1421743880412825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11973774916942707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071595482898852,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,hoodpharoah,2020/04/19,"Online resources for dealing with trauma? Books, videos, articles?

Therapist isn’t an option right now.

Looking to read up on types if trauma, ways to cope/deal with it, and anything mental health related.... Hoping I can help myself on this journey.",4.448372093023256,7.696736627906978,4.503534883720931,78.0920465116279,78.06976744186046,6.2306976744186064,27.20465116279069,7.554174236665415,2.1966409302325585,197,8,28,3,5,61,39,43,0.126,0.759,0.11599999999999999,-0.1179,0,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,6,4,2,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,0,3,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,2,1,8,4,0,7,0,0,1,0,2,4,0,3,1,18,4,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637539408665959,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33043364083552884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3406891057642537,0.0,0.0,0.21483233507858449,0.0,0.0,0.3183405834063771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2691492286768193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32300055678691425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3205985822580395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737153662620779,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.372138958048016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2544073857091135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bogarde_Michael,2020/04/19,"Has Anyone Quit Buspar Cold Turkey? Hello,

I was diagnosed with GAD back in November and prescribed this medication and I currently want to get off of it. I do not like how it makes me feel and it's restrictive in a lot of ways. I was wondering if anyone has quit cold turkey. I've been taking it twice a day 10mg. I have enough of a supply I could wean myself off by splitting them or something. I just want to do this on my own if possible as with the lockdown and everything, seeing my doctor would be tough right now.

If anyone has any experience with this please comment. Any help is greatly appreciated.",2.943045454545451,5.104430183333335,4.5945454545454565,81.55227272727275,76.33333333333334,7.696969696969697,24.24242424242424,8.575989854853784,1.7838333333333334,482,16,92,10,11,162,82,120,0.031,0.8690000000000001,0.1,0.785,1,1,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,2,4,3,0,0,4,0,13,3,0,2,0,23,21,10,0,7,6,0,1,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,7,7,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,3,4,12,2,15,15,3,11,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,6,5,68,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456838363478545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3789246798989336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13890160199672752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14422695613376546,0.0,0.0,0.11649835274281005,0.0,0.0,0.18334657929760287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18489348270749625,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1866502039412321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1623482764742641,0.17670133550461772,0.0,0.0,0.09133740106243178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0943773467581744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19915708686663725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12107970052299015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08825195580339026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15357432305143276,0.0,0.0,0.12057911680900466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1819765716065387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1982893202775787,0.0,0.20364532662930016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3842673892453961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542662307488769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1439473062123518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1390660902117374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1358193781713487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21309321301328554,0.14338423525131136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19589720966568927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283220203152469,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ovrprotectiveunicorn,2020/04/19,"It’s not just losing you from my life that hurts. It’s how it happened. If you moved away I’d miss you, but with us still in the same city and with the same interests that brought us together, it hurts more that I’ve fallen into enemy status with you four. This grief haunts me every day and every hour with no sign of letting up. Suicide is the only medicine to get rid of the pain at this point. I’m sorry for my mental health collapsing last year due to finances, work and school stress. I never want any of you to feel at fault. I’m sorry that I isolated myself and was more snide than usual. I love you and you brought joy to my life and it breaks my heart that I’ve ended up getting you to borderline despise me and not be able to stand my presence. I never meant for reaching out to you to make you feel pressured. I didn’t expect after a year that your emotions towards me would get more negative. You and the group might want to punch me in the face for pissing you off but I’ve never felt that desire with any of you.",4.651462621885159,4.725791394366201,5.0929577464788744,87.73137594799569,69.32863849765258,7.868400144456482,26.243770314192854,7.321109707123232,1.0925358613217764,809,21,175,7,13,258,119,213,0.28600000000000003,0.6559999999999999,0.057999999999999996,-0.9951,0,0,0,0,0,1,15.0,2,14,0,2,3,14,2,2,7,0,7,8,3,2,3,39,24,12,2,6,6,0,3,0,0,2,4,0,0,0,14,15,0,0,4,0,1,4,8,11,0,1,6,3,31,3,35,14,5,31,0,5,0,1,18,12,1,2,13,121,45,3,0.12907412655849673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17554966440035066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12126939076213306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08324213359416055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14519101947583066,0.11432136490035047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21750103709392826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13052751326308534,0.0,0.12393140302218275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.202307711366105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11413982384182955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13719976075341425,0.0,0.15295346143950775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12711201465727912,0.0,0.2763530441109063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1052126404393604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13198703944569087,0.18233774552736495,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14440093173603905,0.0,0.0,0.1164944386094001,0.0,0.08615798175481518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13007636101240422,0.13692725086348187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1371853695967759,0.0,0.0,0.2986497707082374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0981666895506373,0.13734397106080892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12201677004246025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13062990701593738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28897583445570274,0.0,0.0,0.10307876420146184,0.0,0.1478539758768061,0.0,0.0,0.1411861448765308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31052056354368274,0.0,0.14215691494893806,0.0,0.15226252807901253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09396750140001353,0.0,0.0,0.09169055618954763,0.0,0.0,0.16623901128440433
mentalhealth,Dodobird17,2020/04/19,"On my 4th therapist, how to get more out of therapy? I have a lot of issues I'm working through, the main ones being OCD and addiction and a lot of really harmful coping mechanisms. I am on my 4th therapist and I have never really benefited from therapy. I'm not really willing to go on any pharmaceutical drugs. What can I do to make this work for me? I hear about people making realizations in therapy, that has never happened to me. As I've gotten older I've made a lot of really big realizations about my mental health but none of them were in therapy and I feel like therapy just hasn't been helpful to me. I feel like my current therapist is a good fit and sometimes it's nice to talk to her but I just don't know if it's helping me.",4.297302631578944,4.882354125000003,6.718263157894738,73.96884210526319,70.25,10.81684210526316,30.33157894736842,10.793553405168565,3.4249268421052634,585,23,116,18,10,211,88,152,0.02,0.8420000000000001,0.138,0.9549,1,0,1,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,2,5,6,0,0,5,0,13,3,0,4,2,24,26,10,0,1,6,0,2,2,0,1,3,1,0,0,5,6,0,0,3,0,0,1,6,1,0,1,4,3,18,5,24,20,6,13,0,0,0,0,6,8,0,4,6,86,23,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11941461868435595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0744908626998358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12703146375529528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11077329144711333,0.15651059914169144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05723005700207399,0.0,0.06225402813725496,0.09187683948015724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09686573854103236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11643575139426456,0.1234593860161351,0.0,0.1468445215032407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11433115697424533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0602002436487574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10703128737267836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2793806214369074,0.0,0.1036492663463287,0.14623741745826035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11039041722770647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16896778957040126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07422704566210989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07594114821884518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2806961630745523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10833772482012073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804399208421218,0.0,0.0,0.6263418956217794,0.38155266901944296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15949264885113745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,strugglingredditor,2020/04/19,"Everyone thinks I'm an idiot I swear I'm not stupid, I'm too self aware and capable of following reasoning but it feels like people always have to spell things out for me. Like I'm reading a different book but trying to write the same report. Or playing a different game and trying to compare scores. And once they do explain it to me, it makes perfect sense but why can't I come to that conclusion on my own? I spend so much time trying to reason through everything, what am I doing wrong?",4.313877551020409,5.485225897959187,5.282244897959185,82.12704081632656,70.63265306122447,8.865306122448981,28.285714285714285,9.23628265651192,2.362330612244898,390,14,76,8,7,128,71,98,0.07200000000000001,0.7559999999999999,0.172,0.8859,2,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,1,2,2,7,2,0,4,0,5,0,0,3,1,20,15,8,0,0,5,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,1,6,5,0,0,6,4,1,2,2,3,0,0,0,1,8,4,11,15,3,5,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,1,3,47,14,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1647425296551175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17054980713606918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4137122810808185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18918676867238168,0.17793955355042174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10010907858378974,0.14144322755049735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19345463908384866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13215905138296724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14554453784265192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21085159434990347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13726049439296878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19804236355809496,0.0,0.0,0.4071308918922021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20654548248479185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13153495120411585,0.12686321897911326,0.0,0.0,0.11544885270608712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4032641660308924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17865408325987192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21646965557662096,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,twistertwizzler,2020/04/19,"Personality switch? Hello, I’m very new to this all but I would really like advice for my current dilemma. I’m having an issue where one moment I’ll be having one mindset and in a moment later it’s almost as if I am a completely different person. I have been diagnosed with a bipolar disorder, but this (to me) feels more serious. My mood changes are one thing, but to think of multiple things in one way at a certain point then five minutes later feel as if I am a completely different person is starting to way me down a lot. I’m not sure how anyone could help, but anything will.",4.49758620689655,5.4753444482758615,6.2391379310344846,76.15715517241382,70.0344827586207,9.248275862068963,30.017241379310345,9.516144504307137,2.8339689655172418,460,18,85,10,8,159,79,116,0.087,0.826,0.087,0.2399,3,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,0,7,0,12,2,0,1,3,20,19,11,0,4,7,0,2,1,0,2,2,0,0,3,5,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,5,1,2,8,3,13,14,3,16,0,0,0,0,5,6,0,4,9,64,13,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14862877285813325,0.0,0.0,0.15230455315423574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1063507210709126,0.0,0.12516400395396038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16089991444693813,0.0,0.31894450721145823,0.0,0.0,0.12143817700219428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.154376650151577,0.0,0.3178208611854467,0.17431791625887644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15381101805757724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10194833544047333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15875118830702228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07430758380355852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12930860031750954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14689755947539287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4122631840779491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3984193060518564,0.0,0.0,0.14378212800623213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09743811446634977,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10765601348849756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14335091951566675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2020948053969484,0.09745849797681792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12549708935836745,0.0,0.2414572227902209,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080463225048531,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idontknow02612,2020/04/19,"I might have anti-social personality disorder Disclaimer : I have no interest in to making someone with this feel upset I'm not self diagnosing myself I just want help from someone who have it and discuss with me

Since I was 9 years old I've always seen the good side of life even if I was surrounded by a country in a war my mother still tried to make us happy while my father was in Sweden trying to get us out of the misery. Perhaps it's because I saw my surroundings and a bomb explode from my window perhaps that's when it started. When we came to Sweden that's when the real misery started because that's how I learnt to manupilate by my father since I saw him do it many times and even to me I was to young of course to understand what that was but I learnt it and soon I started to manupilate people.

I was a happy child and never got angry that's what my parents told me but I knew that was because when I was angry at someone the only thing that would calm me down was the thought of murdering the person using a knife and slit thier throat or use a hammer and crush them and strangling them or even rip off thier eyes while they were dead. That's when I got calmer and calmer.

 When my classmates would cry about something or even when I heard someone passing away I never cared it was never my problem even now I can just think of a handful of those who I will feel sorry for when they die. I never fit in school so I got bullied for about 6 years until I fell into depression and was thinking of killing myself but luckily my mom noticed something was wrong I never cried because I thought that would make me weak but when I cried in front of my mom was the first time I felt that everything was gonna be alright and it did get better I started to do things I love and even get new friends since we already moved.

Moving was the best decision ever because I finally smiled but I still didn't feel empathy or sympathy for no one but since I was a child I knew that I need to learn it because it didn't seem normal and the only way to live in this society was to be normal so I started to anylize anything any expression my friends had when they were showing empty and I started to do the same but I would never feel it.

I can say that I think big of myself and killing someone is dirty because it's to much work and you need to clean after yourself and even if you did that there is a small change that you will get arestted and your life is over because for one body or more depends on who you are. So no murdering someone isn't in my mind because when someone makes me angry I just ruin them from the inside but they need to go through my 3 strikes because when they pass the third one even if they were dying I wouldn't even blink an eye for them. I have manupilated people before never felt bad for it because they were in my way.

The only reason I'm asking about anti social personality disorder is because one day I thought about doing a sociopath test because I wanted to know and the results were anti social personality disorder so I Googles it and everything seems to discribe me and so I did every psychology test on the internet and they all said the same thing. 

The thing about imaging murdering the person that makes me angry stopped when I was 13 years old but it's starting to come back now and I know that if I don't get help I might actually murder someone and ruin my life so I need your thoughts

PS I've posted this other communities as well because I really really need someone to discuss this with",4.774862327909887,5.482749936974795,5.489582811848145,82.76269712140177,69.23809523809524,7.813290422552,29.617259669825373,7.768660622080223,1.8480982537695927,2821,103,552,31,47,917,276,714,0.16899999999999998,0.7070000000000001,0.12300000000000001,-0.9916,1,0,2,0,0,1,14.0,4,6,12,4,46,28,7,1,29,1,57,11,5,11,9,119,121,66,10,19,22,6,7,0,2,10,5,3,2,8,45,33,0,1,23,1,0,9,16,15,1,6,47,15,100,13,71,62,6,86,0,3,5,1,55,23,0,14,51,410,145,5,0.0,0.0,0.04416034524557231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04993774866996533,0.0,0.03765407430464617,0.0,0.0,0.030773553512515612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037239316872824835,0.0,0.04230539367069508,0.0,0.042516630251572436,0.03479672041565113,0.037784317781317585,0.386200842483626,0.0,0.0385069220606081,0.0,0.047490172539122015,0.040022551270231466,0.0,0.050265818916159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05175731208273958,0.04613839206317567,0.0,0.04787161411921535,0.03898140403688486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14912470125345031,0.02918440501046901,0.0,0.038976294107830114,0.045930785298898186,0.09393082210560057,0.0,0.15559138206930406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26900228276935106,0.04093387836582088,0.03812755681932409,0.0,0.08134085576019337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152499215484973,0.0,0.08689984514209444,0.04957238788813954,0.0,0.03849213080244167,0.0,0.0,0.06992462411148119,0.0,0.11821397671110105,0.0,0.02571829076501877,0.037956022172765884,0.10857873906044783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0963452001092104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06066418855570172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10013135486791076,0.0,0.0497396687928437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09589047729321573,0.0,0.0,0.03995917836849197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04084254849136218,0.0,0.15103345660721487,0.045879382191798566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09601244402630922,0.04569257298317455,0.10599940148906248,0.0,0.09619343510205386,0.03326612049745445,0.16777242181582627,0.2443130196137047,0.04370557502427755,0.0,0.0,0.0886765534526325,0.0,0.05152077634858431,0.09497070411878154,0.0,0.12265826325375145,0.10325070860210693,0.0,0.0,0.05024803866537795,0.0,0.0,0.06274538658335778,0.1975656248018076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043339811005377316,0.0,0.0,0.043300955587144765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0515077570724288,0.057980389017239724,0.04652756300124482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043045912288263384,0.035986957158536045,0.0,0.04579839497411033,0.0,0.0823931607441723,0.047208689590070005,0.0,0.0,0.1497348106724662,0.0,0.0,0.09225935454999187,0.34508405118889834,0.06967585385386056,0.0,0.050656965570528636,0.22421186531604956,0.0,0.07227811860519465,0.03783348723443493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202561800323535,0.0869887772871965,0.0,0.14370313001222398,0.052774710783932866,0.0,0.0,0.043241126987420136,0.0,0.06144755659600741,0.0,0.0,0.04710991033312187,0.1088674388708081,0.0781680277363047,0.0,0.0,0.05338271732726872,0.07183936073205804,0.0,0.0,0.0406878310555539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032944681981003275,0.0,0.0,0.1285855713654433,0.04947699002101641,0.0,0.08742423622003949
mentalhealth,jaxmore01,2020/04/19,"Past Abuse PTSD and Self Hatred/Depression/Axniety - WTF. It’s some fuckery. So as I’ve kinda prefaced in the title, I was a victim of abuse for most of my childhood. I can honestly say I’m in a better place right now, (I am in my early thirties at this point) but I still deal with some major issues regarding my self hated sometimes. Sounds pretty harsh but it’s a real thing. I’ve struggled with my mental issues for my entire adult life so at this point I am pretty self aware, and I am able to connect the dots so to speak childhood have triggered my severe depression and anxiety at some times. 

My depression and anxiety are so bad because I have low self esteem, and I have low self esteem because of I am really hard on myself to be perfect a 100% of the time. 

This has created the most turmoil for me most of my adulthood. Legal issues, financial issues, confidence, and a depressing and congruently irritating feeling of being stuck has felt like a constant rain storm mental health wise speaking.

Has anyone ever felt like this? Or deals with a similar issue? I know this is kinda super personal, but I stand in solidarity with all those who suffer from the horrors of mental illness. 

Thank you.",5.88660844250364,6.833292973799129,6.750026200873362,73.8598573508006,66.86026200873364,9.076098981077148,30.98719068413392,9.21078282632365,2.8540058806404653,957,36,161,17,15,318,130,229,0.26899999999999996,0.564,0.168,-0.9849,0,0,0,0,2,0,27.0,0,1,0,3,7,19,2,2,12,0,16,3,0,1,3,32,24,16,0,0,4,0,4,2,0,0,3,4,0,7,10,11,0,0,4,0,0,0,0,11,0,0,4,8,22,8,27,18,8,25,0,6,0,0,14,14,0,9,12,112,32,1,0.09164605322285588,0.2171711739911204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14021795973841228,0.0,0.0,0.06408105129029502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07652062638288418,0.11173316683348138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0810534865380971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09903682567702732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18896611341614303,0.2368038340517055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08289910197563921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046338998165268964,0.0,0.17598916622855112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08209686256830342,0.09048150401656764,0.0,0.09741546901324186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4782733458626226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05036627409993258,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06473231768708962,0.0895472647674615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2770729988006293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08748652776828991,0.0,0.08002179872113607,0.09575061974977346,0.0,0.17327028583570395,0.0,0.0,0.1864739669570226,0.0,0.0,0.10712933191071312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10431327244205288,0.058710808425872923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0782652287067915,0.0,0.07288061992604725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4780341038648402,0.10353395412989863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09064029002091754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07318865648780577,0.0,0.0,0.09580835332000928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0843753727720364,0.0,0.0,0.060885565512569184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10687910126456897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,iwilleatyourspine,2020/04/19,"I hate feeling so intensely or nothing at all There is no in-between. I feel in violent waves of emotion — one moment I am ecstatic over something silly and trivial, and then the next I would love nothing more than to die right then and there. I hate how much my emotions control me. I hate how much a simple ignore from someone can completely skew my sense of self and throw me into a suicidal thought spiral. If I’m not drowning in emotion, then I am feeling little to nothing at all. As if every emotion has been used up and I am left empty; devoid of all feeling. That is of course until something suddenly triggers me and I am thrown into yet another episode of emotional combustion, only for it to abruptly end soon thereafter and it’s back to nothingness. It is so exhausting. I just want to be normal.",3.923269230769233,5.89374632692308,5.125897435897438,79.68576923076925,72.91025641025641,7.620512820512822,33.153846153846146,8.384062270229773,2.9127461538461534,641,33,111,11,13,212,99,156,0.2,0.706,0.094,-0.9692,0,0,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,1,10,8,4,0,3,0,12,2,0,5,3,31,24,19,3,5,5,0,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,4,9,0,2,5,0,0,1,3,6,0,1,2,4,15,2,23,20,6,24,0,0,0,1,2,11,0,3,12,90,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12026273356976536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08818972754948179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12025055146868036,0.0,0.12863487454932132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11903037859662532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6450555062443633,0.10158152505102833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09663148733152407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2319633582041302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3396986505651459,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12461129885384792,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11494976684389882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10351243395511613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1686210693568227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12197438851650848,0.0,0.11237209995079332,0.33014518188217346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07771708575426199,0.08722710792035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09794485206980888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11964695014889162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09717668182676728,0.17658832484068426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1254525252137666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09105125233357887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09905555734563397,0.0,0.0,0.06764728458181529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08147266732364476,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mugen_is_here,2020/04/19,"What personality traits, disorders do you think Kellyanne Conway possesses? I'm just curious to know the opinions of therapists about her because it'll be good to study and understand the different disorders when directly seeing a person perform with those disorders/traits.",14.19045454545455,13.58990440909091,12.29909090909091,46.06863636363636,50.36363636363636,17.89090909090909,53.81818181818181,15.903189008614273,9.247036363636363,230,14,28,10,2,72,39,44,0.0,0.88,0.12,0.6369,1,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,1,0,1,3,1,0,0,3,0,3,0,0,0,0,7,8,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,1,5,6,0,1,0,0,1,0,4,0,0,1,1,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1614853756701176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2767723360778384,0.6072147274818281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22219214862746428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1455864346215686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4626146593531957,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21109727060538455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3075784489455342,0.0,0.16974226333080197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27577842986070633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,idek5560,2020/04/19,"My ex I dated for 7 years told me he wasn't happy with me for years, he just stayed because he loved me. Honestly I feel so broken, I don't know how to deal with this information. I feel like such a worthless screw up. He was literally the only person I had in my life and honestly I feel so alone right now. I have no idea how to cope. I've literally been staring at my ceiling crying all day.",1.7278571428571432,3.153046547619049,4.120952380952383,86.8907142857143,77.57142857142857,7.180952380952381,22.714285714285715,7.957251820313856,0.9867571428571428,306,9,69,5,7,107,58,84,0.19899999999999998,0.665,0.135,-0.5972,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,7,7,1,0,2,0,6,3,0,2,1,13,12,5,0,0,1,1,3,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,1,3,0,0,6,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,5,4,13,5,9,7,1,10,0,1,1,2,10,4,1,0,6,41,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2513357677790021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1479310471943842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665646049859068,0.15650383862581707,0.25018493464490504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3681078798067017,0.1733654507769466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2583296394916224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27394798022757955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13336658902698836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17140692981595965,0.11855764072440032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21902161842485107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18456355065052504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21189247237282585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2072411902324116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2586568474789053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2318841983453172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3125465707332002
mentalhealth,freespiriting,2020/04/19,"Anyone else have characters and an inside world in their head? About a year ago, two characters “came to life” in my head. I didn’t need to think too hard about who they were, what they looked like or what their names were; I just kinda knew. From there on, more characters were developed and I became aware of a “inner house”. At first there was only a downstairs area, but one of the characters took me upstairs and showed me around. I can see it very clearly in my mind and it’s quite developed. 

The characters each have their own “role”. One of them is the soother, that says nice things to me when I’m anxious. One of them is the “keeper”; he wears a key around his neck which unlocks the basement where memories and thoughts are organised and kept. One of them (and this one is pretty bizarre) is the twin sister of the “soother”. She’s a giant dog-raven hybrid and she’s the “physical soother”; If I feel anxious I can crawl under her wing and feel safe and protected. 

Does anyone else have an “inner world” or “inner people”?  I haven’t told people in my real life about it, as it does sound pretty odd. I’m sure a lot of people would think i’m experiencing a psychotic episode. But it’s not like that at all; my people don’t hinder my life, they are actually very helpful.",5.1036304780876485,5.645152637450199,5.195854083665342,85.75202813745022,68.44223107569721,8.506075697211157,26.84287848605577,8.472884824447931,1.5773125498007974,996,28,207,14,16,312,136,251,0.036000000000000004,0.823,0.141,0.9839,1,0,0,0,0,0,29.0,0,0,9,2,11,5,0,0,17,0,19,7,4,0,3,39,35,17,0,3,7,1,3,2,0,1,3,2,0,0,13,14,0,3,6,1,0,2,4,0,0,7,11,8,28,5,25,23,5,24,0,0,2,0,21,18,0,5,6,136,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.11032151856219888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.100212936143122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2554310192361461,0.0,0.15809584770873694,0.2316683242615589,0.0,0.20127880829737627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12930028589932674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19786347420496106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1888792944539768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11432401699722608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09616116674825878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10127153675402703,0.0,0.2320459883643689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07577573688103813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1304457350344911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23955390320917566,0.11046206677600658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0949344107184268,0.0,0.0,0.09611196133590776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11414933489505127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08382592230496891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3830315917795212,0.0859804190257443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3135014589290284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2300271241503985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12024370911742448,0.0,0.12867684675841445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08990273377811854,0.0,0.0,0.0900870513650658,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065492782392368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07510609532082747,0.14487709814202054,0.0,0.0897499070542207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10802512451080468,0.12560387802759485,0.0,0.0,0.11043445046378246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1865579144861736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08030822347140743,0.0,0.0,0.07280117071323675
mentalhealth,helpls2000,2020/04/19,"Emotional running? (F 20)  don't know what it is but whenever I run whether it's the treadmill or just outside I get very emotional and like people always talk about how running is supposed to calm your mind but instead I feel like it's almost like venting and I just feel like crying afterwards or during really, I go through like every stressing thought that's in my head and all I could think about. I almost get angry, but the sad angsty kind. it's hard to describe. I think about I like proving people that have wronged me wrong and wanting to get better and blah blah blah its prideful stuff. I don't know why and if it's part of one of my mental illnesses, I can't even really pinpoint which one that would be cause I have quite a but wrong with me but I'm starting to notice this now. Does anyone else do this or feel like this?",2.7088954635108493,4.675005846153852,3.4667218934911226,90.27507297830375,76.33727810650888,6.163471400394478,24.87613412228797,7.0316486544052195,0.9632837080867852,664,23,135,7,15,210,97,169,0.19,0.608,0.20199999999999999,0.5402,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,1,0,3,9,16,0,1,3,0,11,2,1,2,2,37,26,17,0,4,12,0,4,10,0,1,1,0,0,0,15,7,0,0,9,0,0,4,3,5,0,2,1,4,17,11,12,22,2,8,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,6,10,84,32,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23392487922938024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0971903729859172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0816721465880183,0.1196796096362306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10330373957226252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11998999180178982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09325857402407,0.0,0.12830382549463756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10221606009193812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757484239881244,0.262777795186178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07714801025806896,0.0,0.09841249683449577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17717899635031098,0.250334629510852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18307597306593887,0.0,0.06638246506312387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10463353610914207,0.0,0.11987471050961054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12163350186371374,0.1283849636844204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39945210254581737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11771106600147163,0.0,0.1179388497242386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13298224859627136,0.0,0.0,0.1582989699731638,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1264874640763912,0.0,0.16195451987063295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12423554419238053,0.0,0.0,0.14965540219797094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08267454725437715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1337987085244109,0.0,0.1337127559739348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09388271576037296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14968670927399585,0.0,0.09272941283945238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09637561997921924,0.0688940878756226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539753774470882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08297428546844304,0.3831208603449646,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pabboo,2020/04/19,"I need help How do you even begin therapy/counselling, when you can’t even open up to friends and family? The very thought of talking to a stranger about my feelings makes me very anxious. How do you get help when you’re too afraid to even ask? Self hatred and the feeling of worthlessness is becoming daily occurrences, it’s suffocating. What do I do?",5.094179104477611,6.7392196119403,5.1345074626865665,82.11758208955227,69.29850746268656,8.942089552238807,32.80298507462687,9.3871,3.02816656716418,282,13,53,6,5,88,49,67,0.091,0.76,0.14800000000000002,0.4673,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,3,0,0,9,3,0,1,3,0,6,0,0,3,0,10,14,6,0,1,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,2,7,1,7,13,0,5,0,1,0,0,9,2,0,0,3,35,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665900394302232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22060928654346312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2606211827480899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4675873573178077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22246078248949827,0.0,0.23863698536108804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18231743163921085,0.0,0.12328972170641468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31634461223042426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15751836924468138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17497605419564588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24617842845725366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18967164896569852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1873416261814589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3894161478712941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Oriejin,2020/04/19,"Genuinely don't enjoy anything or anyone. I don't enjoy any pass-time. I stopped my passion of concept art because I can't be damned to draw for longer than an hour at a time like once a week. Any of my smaller hobbies I realized are just distractions that I don't look back on fondly; when I watch youtube sometimes I find myself just staring at the homepage, refreshing for minutes at a time. 

Even doing activities with friends, I get bored really easily. But I think that's because I stopped enjoying the company of people as well. Whether it be family im really close to, close friends, not as close friends, or just new people i'm meeting, i find that as of late, I really couldn't care less about interacting with them. I get this feeling of being bored and drained at the same time. 

And lately, I've felt that way about my significant other as well. We've been together for upwards of 5 years. Sometimes I catch myself feeling tired or bored of their company. Like I can't think of much to say, and I don't really want to hear much of it anyway. 

I don't want to come across like im just expecting the people in my life to entertain me. I know it takes two to tango. It just feels like, despite my efforts, I grow tired of their company. 

I know IM the problem here. But due to the current restrictions on travel and distancing, I can't seek the mental help i need. It feels like im just slowly aging while sitting around, being displeased with everything. 

It sucks so much because no matter what I try, lifestyle changes, trying new hobbies, there's always that moment where something clicks in my mind and i can hear myself thinking ""yeah... but this isn't even that enjoyable"". and efforts I make to try to make things enjoyable just fall flat. 

I'm probably coming across as a major downer here. But I don't know what else to do with myself in this current hour, so I thought i'd reflect to the anonymous public.",3.6874682566918295,5.5450675186170235,4.5807481125600535,83.82403225806453,73.28191489361703,7.617570350034318,28.352436513383665,8.360895534625662,2.0818039807824302,1521,61,289,26,31,492,183,376,0.085,0.8009999999999999,0.114,0.8406,2,0,1,0,0,0,46.0,0,0,3,2,23,26,2,1,13,1,20,4,0,2,0,62,49,23,0,6,16,0,5,5,3,0,3,3,0,0,19,16,0,3,16,3,0,6,13,7,2,1,3,12,41,19,49,41,6,45,0,0,4,1,13,16,2,3,26,185,60,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0709055219450886,0.0,0.0,0.11589794274351843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05958415431781847,0.0,0.07012450175731394,0.07585921925408473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06552490450534393,0.0,0.1558384137191812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08688214572686855,0.0,0.0901459363471327,0.1468099721175009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07118601273399842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11256711475252924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658554804021593,0.0,0.08033290904424256,0.0,0.17234860927012616,0.12175490926431105,0.08181955061350804,0.0,0.15576952710973593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1975101789513489,0.0,0.0890424090852862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920864966929629,0.0,0.05711766963271948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16783878279784606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3681863339004205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1404954407562175,0.0,0.1922519631956112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06018971800173537,0.2081581815220252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07155895186746639,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11376305241511732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08587645377959915,0.0,0.08604263406327528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18792800092837525,0.06318567834437443,0.0,0.1646019277453991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09075095776198423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17723159316083806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187594373754868,0.08153903430972824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21836307606900274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06776621196146862,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06560249953971245,0.16855918931642447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14248674061969688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06407090815887415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05661291221322388,0.16380656730559073,0.0,0.06765101537366966,0.14906826748788748,0.1958837040722391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17356572242778526,0.0,0.08324245619100913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10052376814027968,0.06763952457967544,0.06835415506250404,0.0,0.15323663911990815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054875523338056925
mentalhealth,angerypotato1999,2020/04/20,"Having a tough time with work, not sure what to do  I'm a college student and I work at a grocery store and my job makes me absolutely miserable. I have really bad anxiety, especially around people I don't know. My anxiety had been getting a lot better, pretty much non existent, but then I got this job and since then my mental health has pretty much gone down the toilet. They work me ridiculous hours, bosses treat me with zero respect, customers constantly rude to me, ill have multiple panic attacks a day sometimes depending on how busy the store is. This on top of trying to juggle my school work and my home life is just overwhelming to say the least. I don't think I've ever been more unhappy in my life. I decided to post here because I feel like no one really understands me in my life. I try to talk to my parents, but they just tell me to ""suck it up"" and ""thats just the way life is"" but I seriously don't know how much longer I can survive living like this. I am overwhelmingly unhappy in my current circumstances. I can't quit due to the state of the economy right now and the fact that I have bills to pay, plus this is my first job, so I just feel like any other job I would qualify for would suck just as bad. I just feel so trapped and helpless. Its gotten to the point where I've really started letting myself go too. My place is a wreck. I used to love dressing up and now I barely put in an effort.Plus between work and school I have no time to take care of my mental health.. I just don't know how to dig myself out of this.",3.540111801242233,4.662281625396826,4.810351966873707,84.968198757764,72.42857142857143,8.271911663216011,25.759144237405106,8.716276077567194,1.694214630779848,1212,38,254,22,23,402,165,315,0.212,0.6809999999999999,0.106,-0.9882,7,1,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,0,2,10,19,23,5,4,15,0,25,8,0,7,3,47,47,21,0,2,11,1,3,3,0,2,7,1,1,0,11,14,0,0,9,0,4,3,8,14,0,3,6,4,42,9,36,38,6,37,0,4,0,1,7,17,2,2,17,173,53,16,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0635058629817383,0.0,0.14288047519913558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08313357545116506,0.0,0.10624035883623408,0.0,0.0,0.15594726211276996,0.05692740074971541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08259256299774474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952135216808842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10091737707028657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06022641568009464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08447322372938594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14165670554165927,0.13343033365492132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07943430984078062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04879046941711408,0.0,0.05307356684640073,0.0,0.07468952762419155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1985304668578152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0936740386802845,0.0,0.09196666041751493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.370685835613122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15396794798969385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09549378372251208,0.26384592470543683,0.13687143679697275,0.0,0.08246178346937516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07939366351646172,0.08428475077675293,0.0,0.06233605746606567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882227821473492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20594895120443066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06328095044826985,0.0,0.0,0.10956866152500272,0.1036943964656789,0.0,0.0,0.06474227816229186,0.0,0.097568771332732,0.0,0.08828020613151649,0.0,0.08943822812801096,0.1900148102339589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09387899042050894,0.0,0.09932778864302982,0.0,0.0,0.1794768991689179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07975136059644124,0.0,0.07426450668136879,0.0,0.18902377295014103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0772500839584128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09236140459137172,0.0,0.06609927947129803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08801545017776456,0.0,0.07021484969163615,0.07506034290669522,0.08162371232925753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05983814824529896,0.0,0.0,0.10890856496576676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12680628865826615,0.0,0.0,0.09721839596718873,0.0,0.08065574970007237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07412567088637151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33993156802831465,0.0,0.0,0.1326778474452306,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MiloDean,2020/04/20,"Spiraling the drain 
Now to preface this I probably have some sort of confirmation bias in addition to what ever mental health issues are consuming me. 
I already have this illogical fear that I’m being watched and my actions are being recorded, but to compound on this now when I listen to podcasts or tv shows comedy even music. They will start to sync up to my life in usually negative ways, describing my surroundings, my mental state, or even as far as an action I’ve started but haven’t completed yet. Now I understand that these “moments” I’m having should be entirely coincidental and I’m the one applying them to myself. But the inter part of me screams if I were to go back and play it again the outcome would be different. Maybe it wouldn’t even have the same words as before. Of course when I go back it’s the same as it was and now the timing is off. However; what if this media I’m consuming is intentional curated for me due to my online activity and they know far more about me then I can even begin to understand I’m actions are watched and my mental health is being monitored. This whole thing has got me on edge and idk what to do about it",4.835732378854626,6.047591788546258,6.057662444933921,76.90164785242291,69.44052863436124,9.904074889867843,30.046530837004404,10.125756701596842,3.093361453744494,924,36,174,24,16,310,126,227,0.057999999999999996,0.914,0.027999999999999997,-0.6753,2,0,0,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,3,0,17,3,0,1,8,0,25,3,0,1,1,28,40,21,0,5,7,0,0,0,0,4,3,2,0,0,17,8,0,0,3,3,0,5,3,2,0,1,3,4,22,1,27,28,6,35,0,0,2,0,4,9,0,6,19,137,39,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16001167738639524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2229928961376075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1233847611078012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15203028447445882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15149467962433402,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38308589868259496,0.13116127005511286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16316589540282472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16481427194561388,0.0,0.11597016037162915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3082575404145147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15134286857602866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0796884926549912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10241815410672006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14567250982277205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4383792532680096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09825610370546788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15702143090177356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15633508308082292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20526422604533212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09633190119476892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08455096816567045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3019013061139161,0.0,0.0,0.15969758516501098,0.0,0.0,0.1150946620468756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16188790018833105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10300420778804256,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,9to5ggez,2020/04/20,"Gf and I really struggling So we have been together for a few years now, moved in together in September, officially on 1 lease since the beginning of the month. A combination of the quarantine and bedroom issues are really stressing and hurting our relationship and mental. In short, we have had less and less sex and she blames me of not being there during it amd I am in my own head everytime trying to be there and not mess it up and its caused things to be really awkward. We have tried talking about it and we seem good but then a few days to by and it starts to get weird again and we cant get out of the cycle. It seems like a physical solution would ease our mental strain but its the mental strain thats causing the physical issue so we are stuck in a loop and its just really getting to be a lot.",3.898333333333333,5.200291240740743,5.262654320987657,81.37694444444449,71.77777777777777,9.350617283950617,25.84567901234568,9.725611199111238,2.2906567901234567,639,20,129,16,12,214,97,162,0.10099999999999999,0.8220000000000001,0.078,0.0485,0,1,0,0,0,0,8.0,8,0,0,0,8,10,0,5,12,0,14,2,1,2,0,30,22,17,0,1,5,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,1,0,10,19,0,0,2,0,0,1,3,8,0,0,3,0,13,2,20,14,6,18,0,1,0,1,12,9,0,3,9,99,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3073085868066257,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09646322855245174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23443962999046705,0.0,0.0,0.12545605916858815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15350666887874684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16012267889002174,0.0,0.0,0.31223399662701395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07307458330897906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12716295703342215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.45220798169778004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11938900081130603,0.15897410470020293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3832852179322313,0.0,0.0,0.16058711961358307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2723341556277374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12372963624729448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10586965587758823,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17133717327487566,0.156367824624457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12022237968624475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09937070307878854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2031026397072029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10625348841892507,0.0,0.0,0.09632112397576764
mentalhealth,fadingfume,2020/04/20,"I don't know if I have a sexuality problem or not \[Sorry for any English mistakes\]

I don't know if I have an actual problem, or that I'm too engaged with psychological theories (about traumas and such). 

I suspect I have a problematic relationship with sexuality. I don't know if it's the usual awkwardness most people have, or that I have an actual issue I should deal with.

I have this really vague memory from my childhood. When I was 7 or 8 I was friends with our neighbor, who was 12 at that time. I know (mainly because my family says so) that we used to hang out a lot, but I barely have memories from those times. I barely have memories from my childhood whatsoever, my memory is generally pretty bad - I lose things quickly. Anyway, when I was 15 I was struck with this one memory: I was in this neighbor's room, laying on his bed (clothed) and he was on top of me (clothed as well). I could feel his penis through the cloths, and I remember trying to slightly move him so I wouldn't feel it, but he kept positioning himself back to that uncomfortable position. I vividly remember the physical feeling. That's all I remember. 

Fast forward to this day: I'm 22 and I've barely had any romantic or sexual engagement with men in my life. I tend to ascribe it to my pickiness and my mental difficulties (slight social anxiety, depression).

The main sexual engagement I had so far was with a guy I met in Berlin. We went (with another friend) to a sex club (I didn't really know it was going to be this sexual). The dance floor had giant screens playing porn. People made out everywhere, walked around naked and in the dark areas they were literally fucking. I saw a man fingering a woman (for the first time in my life I was witnessing a sexual act IRL). It made me feel sick and I sat all evening near the entrance, waiting for my friends. 

I remember feeling extremely depressed during the drive back home (I should say that I was already slightly depressed earlier in the evening, before we even got in). I didn't know why, but I felt awful, like I was violated, although nothing happened to me there. I still don't know why I felt that way.

I kind of want to try therapy, but also don't. I don't really believe in ""digging up"" my childhood traumas - I'm really skeptical it can help me heal (from my other problems).

I just don't really know if I have a problem that's related to sexuality or that I'm just depressed because -. Well I don't really know why, sometimes I just feel emotional pain. I usually ascribe it to not being in a relationship, or not having enough friends, or not loving myself. But sometimes I don't understand it, like that pain that came after the sex club.",4.54195141700405,5.918289600000001,6.244149797570852,74.66821862348179,70.30769230769229,10.012145748987855,31.761133603238868,10.247446810586672,3.5005576923076926,2112,94,390,59,38,727,236,520,0.156,0.7490000000000001,0.096,-0.9882,0,0,0,0,0,0,80.0,4,0,1,3,24,33,3,1,23,1,45,12,1,3,2,89,84,32,0,14,24,0,9,2,6,3,6,2,5,4,29,22,0,2,23,4,0,10,16,19,2,2,29,14,72,14,50,49,7,52,0,5,3,5,31,24,1,14,21,279,101,0,0.0,0.0,0.13670713437514728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07729611804271129,0.0560147573876374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952656572733218,0.07344802260053264,0.053584038316605305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062354673529229375,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10772017082800778,0.05848443642683876,0.08539725301966104,0.0,0.059602919080899625,0.07891644158641138,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08011252831521895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05592502940714402,0.0,0.0,0.04517306596266855,0.07221305659218434,0.2413177454303817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07879091052549482,0.0,0.07237494587753461,0.0,0.13879168068573242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06603195190197401,0.0,0.21250036653277504,0.0,0.13450787964809802,0.0,0.0,0.0595800244397177,0.0,0.0,0.21646558538847396,0.06475523820247404,0.0,0.0,0.03980804284886162,0.0,0.05602118140335025,0.0,0.0,0.06935531011473754,0.06194033680722514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04694951619221715,0.0,0.07026059048193731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07310851573742627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07294082329487916,0.3464528409403875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0989493499331658,0.0684406487642307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07836215306764413,0.0,0.0595495375002433,0.06321811722466028,0.13255606293847316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07058862840835955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07444647899249604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0672098220858309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047464132083902925,0.0,0.14906509471640908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09712041365813023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07126068735499655,0.0,0.26809344542511704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2692347440364893,0.0,0.0,0.1504036855476979,0.3173881673784079,0.0,0.0,0.11140478546231296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07140179673467723,0.0,0.0,0.13855208797988344,0.07840935754438892,0.0,0.0,0.05593782395493092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08010227053573735,0.0,0.04653461627084194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12253096254051622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09511156819405868,0.0,0.0,0.07291904995870653,0.0,0.060496170332016826,0.15428878186486855,0.0,0.04131420548450725,0.0555982583832201,0.0,0.0,0.1259572758458585,0.06493218049960063,0.1896134631961694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Alexsir75New,2020/04/20,"Extreme paranoia I constantly feel unsafe, it affects me constantly especially when I’m alone. I am always afraid of everything from the paranormal to people who want to do bad things. I sleep very poorly and take melatonin - circadin sleeping pills which help to some extent but doesn’t solve the issue. I am always well armed and very careful. Even with alarms, security cameras and motion detectors I still never feel safe, not even in my own home. Is there any way to change this? I struggle everyday because of it. I have looked at online tests (the in depth ones with 50+ questions) and symptoms for Paranoid Schizophrenia but I highly doubt I have it, any advice? Note that in my situation it’s difficult for me to access a psychiatrist/psychologist. Please help!",5.446739130434782,8.000503311594205,5.483405797101451,76.23206521739135,70.23188405797102,8.078260869565218,30.34057971014493,8.841846274778883,2.82816231884058,619,26,99,12,12,194,100,138,0.16399999999999998,0.705,0.132,-0.7078,0,1,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,6,10,0,4,4,0,7,5,3,1,1,18,14,7,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,1,0,9,6,0,2,3,0,1,1,3,6,1,1,0,3,13,4,16,14,3,14,0,0,1,0,4,6,0,3,6,66,22,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182486854873284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16091551186860314,0.0,0.0,0.25855904480996184,0.0,0.0,0.211312606896898,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12972669352182253,0.09471155017408377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15840913368902332,0.0,0.16435988732629814,0.0,0.0,0.3357975630699127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20523962640009413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13963571245453113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15711855214083167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20828124096518075,0.16415596526319326,0.15584785705363827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16216495523161326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13047089799848607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11983021407472128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10528211080276627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10771335851976424,0.0,0.0,0.17054859534325653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17404892948697026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17464135763868333,0.31096257496082524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1240779494140579,0.0,0.0,0.16242549852879115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16148796573630328,0.11681821358352447,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10322031418862784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25639152808278154,0.0916407099124708,0.12332474528757212,0.0,0.0,0.13969546360372245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,itsjustamaymaybrah,2020/04/20,"I hope someone can help me Hey all. I hope you can give me some advice. My friend I met over xbox life has become one of my better friends but from what he's told me every now and again, he has some issues. He is autistic, depressed, has OCD and I think he told me he's suicidal. He's also very materialistic, especially about sex (mind you he is 16). He said that he's had 1 or 2 bad ex's that were basically sluts and now he can't trust anyone like that anymore(also the reason he doesn't have many friends besides me). But 2 days ago he said that he became friends with a couple girls and he's gonna meet up with them for sex after all this corona stuff

I know that it's not a good idea for him to do that, especially with his problems but I don't know how to tell him that without losing a friend",2.4169230769230765,3.509324286549713,3.8932163742690062,90.57858299595144,75.14035087719299,6.665047233468286,21.92577597840756,7.010146845296331,0.3490599190283405,627,15,146,6,13,208,103,171,0.177,0.6809999999999999,0.14300000000000002,-0.9108,0,0,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,1,2,6,16,0,0,4,0,14,4,0,2,2,27,26,10,1,3,6,1,0,1,5,1,1,2,0,1,11,7,0,0,5,1,0,0,5,5,0,1,7,2,19,11,14,18,4,8,0,2,0,3,37,2,0,5,7,81,30,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13195403914820794,0.1196998356606507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21597389935965955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09441918238150487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11274807190135401,0.0,0.14913487019952987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11942694094434242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14941297968931494,0.0,0.08708600783962207,0.0,0.11630491877481525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11377229417156905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5216361581956761,0.0,0.0,0.12953728749643448,0.0,0.11326043629509094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09051070251819486,0.0,0.0,0.26823922789484633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1524373853269318,0.0,0.14094081592589186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14842273415819007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09537878025731576,0.0659709801384325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15106893745087271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13690367289649188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363462358611674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150279465590316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1292096705885393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1388378387303569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2568972472561739,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441419703580548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15458206525073462,0.14770570129194888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11802600522604452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08652458208501486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2580622851464497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11141751037658508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1301683293692538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ImNotSure122,2020/04/20,"My head is a scary place to be. Due to this Covid-19 quarantine, and my past battles with depression, I have been having these thoughts that scare me. Just the other day, I remember just thinking about death and suicide. First there was that part where I said to myself, ""You're just stuck inside, and no one is around, just kill yourself."" Then, the moment where I thought about who would and wouldn't really care. I.e. brush it off, laugh at the fact, or who would genuinely be heart broken. Then, the part where I actually contemplated it and thought about ways I would do it.  My mind, is full of fucking bear traps, I step in one and hurt myself each time till I'm eventually dead. Thankfully it hasn't gotten that bad. I've tried going to therapy, but I feel I'm just not ready to tell a random person, even if it stays between us, how I feel and my feelings and intentions. I'm scared that one day my mind will win and I will no longer be alive to see another day. I don't know why I posted this but I guess I felt the need to tell someone over Reddit over IRL.",5.204279523293606,5.4159147511737125,5.259154929577465,86.53982665222105,68.15492957746478,8.807367280606718,27.182737450343083,8.617729084823388,1.5917846876128563,834,23,180,12,13,261,129,213,0.171,0.762,0.067,-0.951,0,1,0,0,0,3,32.0,1,0,0,2,15,12,3,2,7,0,19,3,2,2,1,44,41,17,4,6,10,0,4,0,0,6,0,1,0,1,15,12,0,0,10,0,0,2,6,8,0,4,9,7,23,4,20,23,4,27,0,2,1,1,7,11,1,4,11,121,38,0,0.0,0.0,0.11840566502821165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12723055019437526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080140640880503,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1013098346413576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12370933617464018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23475352363082316,0.0,0.10450584112304948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08014076381646848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18405218815431595,0.0,0.11650083233814798,0.0,0.0,0.10320767015454864,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1121724492063977,0.0,0.0,0.06895759769283699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13366441652169314,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452493370058687,0.0,0.0,0.14378281155676076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298918549818192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13423943582619038,0.0,0.0666826598495643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450279526048467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08996852297248885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466596414328657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2627884231979889,0.11582819013011222,0.0,0.10594522783409463,0.12676947265328214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620559385919267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07773044438402599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13744914339071146,0.0,0.11541757300343858,0.0,0.2429554305319862,0.0,0.0966884554013582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10280693218827416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12932719284517466,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13272102946971456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2121046483755787,0.1117091621880647,0.13875739048156005,0.0,0.0,0.077746705159755,0.0,0.28897981743200296,0.07075153842541163,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08237864494320755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14595132157292934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09631024435360128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10948615720588327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25857916201557146,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,CthuluPlush,2020/04/20,"A matter of not knowing how to describe something Last night I had a particularly bad panic attack. Ever since, I've had a peculiar sensation like... like that video effect where every time something moves it leaves behind an after-image trail that moves a half-second later. But I'm not the first thing that moves. I'm the thing that trails after and jolts back into place when it stops.

And I honestly dont even begin to know what to search for or to say to describe what's wrong. Any help is appreciated and whole I'm not concerned for my safety, it's disconcerting at best.",5.998750000000001,6.604376375000001,6.453571428571429,77.29142857142857,66.5,8.542857142857143,26.714285714285715,8.418075326091056,1.7447535714285711,462,12,85,6,7,150,77,112,0.128,0.696,0.17600000000000002,0.581,0,0,2,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,3,6,9,1,1,7,0,4,0,0,2,1,16,10,7,0,0,5,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,11,4,0,1,3,1,0,3,4,5,0,1,2,1,3,4,12,8,2,18,0,0,0,0,2,4,0,1,13,54,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11485684747957607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1921465533747285,0.0,0.1298726066180319,0.14102328555470972,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1772486723668852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19794791457893315,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11155593985787336,0.1527784635693272,0.142304364576712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14366507250915558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11320917893964885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1856445194053012,0.13767491082532604,0.0,0.17883924235642215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16503066018771578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5385374831456993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1584999052206016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19816612914838094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17646310059522774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1343149548176482,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13971467663619178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2600528052714931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1412068018449248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22441746486695185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0984861385088935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1885692678246042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1846641173331252,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,maria2111,2020/04/20,"I talk to friends that aren't here. So, back in September I was at a party and there were lost of close friends of mine, I tried to drink as little as possible knowing that I get drunk very easily, but we played a drinking game and I lost a couple of times and I got a little bit tipsy. Everything was ok till we decided to watch a movie and a close friend of mine sit next to me, he started touching me and when we went to bed he slept with me since the rest of the girls were sleeping with their boyfriends, he started touching me aggressively, I pretended to be asleep and there were people in the room with us so he didn't do anything. Since then I keep talking to myself, but is more like I talk with someone, like I have a real conversation with someone even tho I am alone. It gotten worse since the quarantine and I feel like i am going insane. The thing is that i always seem to talk to my friends, especially the boy from September and my crush. I kinda stopped talking to my best friends and even though they are concerned about me I feel anxious... (sorry if my english is bad tho, it's my second language).",4.4771577380952365,5.238571566964289,4.983999999999998,85.92766666666668,69.9375,7.937619047619048,29.219047619047622,8.021203637495839,1.7680586904761912,877,32,182,11,15,280,123,224,0.114,0.711,0.175,0.9528,0,2,2,0,0,0,22.0,4,0,2,3,13,15,1,0,13,1,16,6,3,0,0,31,31,22,0,1,3,0,4,3,5,0,0,0,2,2,6,19,3,2,5,6,0,2,2,4,0,1,12,5,35,11,28,18,4,20,0,2,1,0,24,8,0,3,12,127,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11167543126535334,0.0,0.0,0.08972004159638808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181292185058895,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08873178057224629,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08291169709422082,0.09003037853496412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.113156951387434,0.0,0.11771829076989772,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1193076466197591,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2112572650350051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14243638493774424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0969072417402366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10904033965627156,0.0770310634778079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4165312983885906,0.0,0.05633474254065375,0.0,0.06128011801742182,0.0,0.08623846746012212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09584088666395968,0.0,0.0,0.059258463200805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15803531397101486,0.21614037177436887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23541008351434425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11467439388855424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475311501079286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12155784665852876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12272982917295465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09816092874062347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675848568192653,0.0,0.10790407731012112,0.0,0.18272158973893432,0.0,0.0,0.12070261033010775,0.15263988789712885,0.0,0.0,0.09014753678305347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4333331020564686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07163494040135107,0.0,0.10593870043578026,0.0,0.06287432813329791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320691632445643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.129701650144881,0.0,0.0,0.0889679128473574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09995597370238088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10988411628760546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Zelda649,2020/04/20,"Should I feel guilty about running a secret Instagram fan account? Hello everyone,

So I currently run an account on Instagram that focuses on video games. I just reached five thousand followers and am quickly gaining more. I also get an average of about 500-700 likes on a photo now. This account is something nobody knows about, not my friends or my family. I never intended to get this my traction on this account so now I am starting to feel guilty about it. I also am gaining alot of followers quicker now so I could potentially end up with way more. I refuse to tell anyone about it for obvious reasons but should I feel guilty about not telling anyone especially my parents, btw im in college?",4.275897435897438,6.796651384615388,5.245769230769233,76.74839743589746,73.61538461538461,8.333333333333334,34.67948717948718,9.075114841892004,3.650025641025641,560,31,92,13,12,183,79,130,0.09,0.8420000000000001,0.068,-0.5905,4,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,0,2,16,2,0,0,5,0,7,0,0,2,2,21,16,8,0,3,5,1,3,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,6,2,0,1,6,2,4,4,3,0,0,2,0,3,14,2,19,13,3,19,0,0,0,0,8,6,0,2,9,71,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3481971911008491,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3044487707890093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738197134108953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19282199590027727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20802643996213346,0.0,0.0,0.20523288189987005,0.0,0.3302345407950628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16819832914893285,0.0,0.2274837354366937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2351587390570999,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1196449646985512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10635965756268924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16790750330094525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2417356190017713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22383698033769275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16759993134264606,0.0,0.0,0.15409270686920806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.38056750022488106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17280408147772405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,cool47girl,2020/04/20,"1-minute survey !! Hello! My name is Taylor and I am studying User Experience design. I am currently researching ways for users to easily track their mental health and have an outlet to express their emotions in their day-to-day life. I am particularly interested in what you do for your mental wellbeing and how you do it. This survey should only take 1-2 minutes. I really appreciate your help, thanks!

[https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/HTT9D9Q](https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/HTT9D9Q)",9.005239726027398,13.25566190410959,8.012585616438358,53.86901541095892,66.94520547945207,9.12945205479452,26.93321917808219,9.516144504307137,3.416179452054795,401,13,49,10,8,124,54,73,0.0,0.8009999999999999,0.19899999999999998,0.9373,1,0,0,0,0,0,31.0,0,4,3,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,8,2,0,1,0,6,10,4,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,12,2,6,9,0,4,0,0,0,0,11,2,0,0,1,34,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35693933729644833,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3112869891452074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2706976369599708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2941538711592463,0.0,0.0,0.18548806505504786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954644578488787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5577628550952731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21046765381833446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17728202463421774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20806851640006946,0.0,0.0,0.2547782480832201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21965750031825995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,rapbery_,2020/04/20,"Not sure what's going on Since I left college 2 years ago (UK) I've been dealing with these thoughts that come around during the holidays. They're very random, last year during my summer off I compulsively researched something wrong and almost convinced myself to drop out of university. After that I got a car then developed this fear that I'll accidentally commit a hit and run without knowing. I always check my car after a journey for damage just in case.

I then got scared of being arrested during the Christmas off for no reason and now with this lockdown I've developed a fear that someone will steal my desktop and all my files. I've started locking my bedroom door every night but the thought still hits me at night.

What is this supposed to be? It's like everyday is fine until these random thoughts cause massive anxiety and worry. When I was young I had a habit of checking my laptop to see if it was still there but that was small compared to all the worrying I do now.

I tried going to a gp but all they did was give me a number to call a helpline instead of booking an appointment and hopefully getting me some medication or something. Does anybody know what this could be and what I can do to stop worrying so much?",6.104936708860755,6.838367257383973,6.3053333333333335,77.998,66.29957805907172,8.682869198312238,33.52151898734177,8.648137234880735,2.7661270886075955,988,42,177,14,15,316,147,237,0.152,0.7829999999999999,0.065,-0.9519,0,1,2,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,1,0,10,11,0,3,13,0,17,1,0,2,5,39,34,17,0,3,8,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,2,0,17,12,0,1,6,2,2,7,3,6,0,0,12,1,21,5,26,15,5,38,0,1,1,0,4,9,0,7,22,124,38,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11412955605796213,0.0,0.1289250347470965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10713073577783752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09849378541789036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146152478859979,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13146866277464433,0.0,0.0,0.1322622366061406,0.0,0.11090716139606034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1027968032825454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13273611925879156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11267043627405053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10847785507666803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2897602302006686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06726682590479585,0.1235092181482474,0.14634376032263027,0.0,0.2059470839952868,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12787830420987445,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14151582301588495,0.10494884727272068,0.0,0.0,0.13988780252969624,0.0,0.0,0.06290099426078867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12970259052073227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0946464368379587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24164725796470446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323769645203574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12890171817335416,0.0,0.10259748466187872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1065037498273936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10908988673505167,0.19823686087516207,0.0,0.0,0.0911302715007009,0.0,0.20564064234230475,0.10764118888367727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12134582910905956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3066405628624403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0874131428198238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623265208494537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12411089423578214,0.0,0.0,0.3922571685451529,0.0,0.0,0.1407684677663203,0.0,0.16582221046063791
mentalhealth,torontogyal1,2020/04/20,"Memory suppressing? So I’ve recently read a lot about past traumas and how it’s important to take a look back at who you were before and work through past traumas to understand where your present problems stem from. 

I have a hard time however trying to remember myself when I was younger such as memories from early childhood and memories from my first two years of high school. I used to think it was normal to not really remember your childhood but apparently it’s not? And even if that was the case, why is it so hard for me to remember things from when I was 14/15? Surely I was grown enough to be able to process memories at that time. 

I did read that if you experienced a lot of mental trauma and abuse during certain parts of life, your brain tries to suppress those memories because they are painful, but how can I open myself back up to them? I’m having a hard time doing so and I want to understand where my present issues stem from.",7.126229508196722,6.808676076502737,7.022409836065574,77.30968032786886,64.19125683060109,11.03584699453552,34.14699453551913,10.577609850970193,3.4466725683060115,754,29,145,17,10,240,107,183,0.132,0.816,0.052000000000000005,-0.9324,2,0,0,0,1,0,12.0,0,5,2,2,14,7,0,0,6,0,14,3,1,3,2,31,22,18,0,5,6,0,3,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,10,7,0,2,6,2,0,1,2,5,0,2,7,5,20,2,26,14,4,25,0,0,1,0,8,7,0,4,17,107,30,4,0.12402046916172375,0.14694397597944794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19072817091733826,0.0,0.07560172688460971,0.0,0.10553228471745406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13844785961621273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12814629740518788,0.0,0.08191435021641676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1054917477130762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33329394079855384,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13103443486561508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1294451482753802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0875993250899368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10414595874253134,0.0,0.0,0.21087553573470144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12498346298936215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12151372773960376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13196652328130318,0.0,0.0,0.13430208239565405,0.2367831420469189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11867083965755508,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481080617240162,0.0,0.07945068827060987,0.0,0.1224552513563204,0.0,0.4214730456439528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12551533592851133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168878244629603,0.0,0.0932479582717912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08239368892061046,0.07946730891177206,0.0,0.0,0.21695199874318435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1684035152868128,0.0,0.12114997749201599,0.25821936442822696,0.0,0.10711386573413499,0.0,0.0,0.07315048597114134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11190918326847052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0902883786263937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07986511596934658
mentalhealth,Karasuma001,2020/04/20,"I need advice...    
hi, i have a big problem. I have been seeing a psychiatrist for 1 year today. He diagnosed me with severe depression. I already told him about things that happened to me but never enough for him to understand that it is really horrible. I explain myself, I see and I hear things which, apparently, are not real but which make me live a living nightmare almost all the time. It can be eyes, coming out of the walls, voices whispering things in an unknown language but the most recurrent is a humanoid form which often appears in a corner of my sight. Also there are centipede  the most on the time on my books. It's horrible I start to become crazy, the drugs do not work any more and I cannot speak about it because I am afraid of destroying the peace of my routine and my life, I do not want to end in hospital.  Thanks for your help i hope it will end.",3.4345112781954867,5.193094309941525,4.630881370091898,83.61644736842106,73.73684210526315,7.692731829573934,25.66457811194653,8.418075326091056,1.7454157059314954,681,23,132,12,14,224,107,171,0.142,0.769,0.08900000000000001,-0.8277,2,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,1,0,1,5,6,1,1,13,0,14,4,1,1,2,27,29,7,0,4,6,0,0,0,0,1,3,4,0,0,13,6,0,0,2,1,0,2,5,4,0,0,2,8,23,2,20,25,6,19,0,1,4,0,10,9,0,6,8,102,36,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15463110564387705,0.0,0.0,0.1584553313328884,0.0,0.17462268852956667,0.12654513292576666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10760918930243993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0964621399686128,0.1747645620995951,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363104616622851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13629259322461018,0.1606111094069365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18350912226231653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2803088103619423,0.16350507569259118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1399318415412254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17834891367156322,0.0,0.10606549138880672,0.0,0.0,0.1571688470250336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177017650507763,0.0,0.0,0.2794591003392711,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10562698140426126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1173335688487554,0.12204508173816744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15141510143957054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1801127055117914,0.10137312636072016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2521949047042634,0.0,0.0,0.17876709410136465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11200367247079483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14568689403335086,0.0,0.0,0.3153845241652101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18454299861145645,0.0,0.14999380226444747,0.15120589234999146,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16473428253893818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0933345401923184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11520120737309875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10190190505837378
mentalhealth,pinkpineapples4u,2020/04/20,"Anxiety and school I graduated high school in 2015 and went to college with the intention to become a dermatologist. I transferred schools twice, then I got sick and had to medicals withdrawal for a year. I maintained a 3.8 GPA throughout my time in school and had no social life because of it. Now I'm in a online program, in the beginning of the semester I was doing very well. I was very persistent with turning in quality work, but then I started experiencing anxiety so bad that I would go to the library and sit there for hours. Unable to get any work done. And I've been pretty much stuck since February. I don't know how to get help or what's going on. My mom says that I over plan and over think so much in the beginning of the semester that I burn myself out. Even though I know I'm not lazy, I feel crazy and frustrated because I know I'm a good student. I just don't know what to do. I have never done this bad before. And I feel even worse because I don't even have any stories outside of the library and my college dorm. 
Also, covid-19 threw my savings plan off and I really need to move out of my dysfunctional mom's house. But now I'm really broke. I feel really stuck and I feel like a failure.",3.754167800453516,4.968855248979594,5.1305782312925166,82.52176303854877,72.0204081632653,8.709750566893424,28.713151927437643,9.150863307647796,2.3231043083900227,956,37,196,20,18,320,126,245,0.166,0.743,0.091,-0.9684,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,0,0,0,5,13,8,1,0,13,0,15,3,0,2,1,36,42,22,0,2,5,2,4,1,0,1,3,1,1,0,7,16,0,0,9,0,0,5,6,4,1,1,12,6,27,4,29,29,2,30,0,1,0,0,5,13,0,1,12,127,34,14,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08670606078877953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14746310179407654,0.0,0.16588703049933295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1810578260628927,0.19828148215326466,0.1197449984427374,0.09226022866177347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22190932593485985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2148376689241886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21928827994049516,0.07745761552689748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11329338143638175,0.0,0.1232389014648312,0.09094030624517337,0.08671600461649356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07267384158776355,0.1145551520620917,0.0,0.0,0.10677509422011212,0.1251059121810827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23834640479266436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07658257172250835,0.05297013973575285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10922505160232704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2539680788820127,0.0,0.11523679176835255,0.15940717769935353,0.08039449102426235,0.08362272045949573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11030545837936996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2083761955919091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08622254697641622,0.0,0.4389206061188791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08968886067760493,0.0,0.0,0.11052388364840736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07674255824217392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06947326224354249,0.10652532572314614,0.0,0.06322248863231679,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1179333981170752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17892112808611166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974855531436295,0.10050947022023406,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15786688367212334,0.0,0.11049258893290884,0.07702078991218937,0.0,0.0,0.06982103989465044
mentalhealth,rrbb1123,2020/04/20,"Need help with controlling thoughts I have these uncontrollable thoughts that pop into my head that I have dealt with for about five years now. They used to be religious oriented and I learned I could get rid of them by just letting them happen and not worrying and soon I would forget all about them. 

However, now I cannot let these new thoughts 'just happen' because they are dangerous to my health. I imagine my immune system attacking my heart or my cells releasing cytokines which causes the immune system to attack the body and I get this weird feeling like its happening. Its just like I am able to create and adrenaline release. And there is scientific evidence that shows imagining things happening in your body can make it happen. On top of this I imagine doing something like wearing earbuds and then the immune system attacking my body which I am afraid is creating a ""nocebo"" like effect when I do wear them.

The harder I try to eliminate these thoughts the more they come back. Any tips and tricks on how you guys get yours to go away? Any another thoughts or inputs?",6.880839160839161,8.092305747474747,6.3217171717171725,76.86667832167834,64.75757575757575,10.132711732711735,32.907536907536915,10.214889679676881,3.4415341103341106,870,35,150,20,13,268,119,198,0.095,0.767,0.139,0.7447,1,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,3,7,3,12,12,5,2,6,0,16,11,7,6,1,39,35,13,0,3,6,0,1,4,0,1,4,0,0,1,14,12,0,1,11,1,0,2,2,8,0,1,5,1,29,4,19,25,2,19,0,0,0,0,13,6,0,2,12,109,43,1,0.10527476896003364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318090583694745,0.110389774330795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3592957429534162,0.098909110871432,0.08094979910658773,0.0,0.06417452203295818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3508096074503331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814618699170102,0.0,0.09068489179397596,0.0,0.0,0.118074605083978,0.08405333672867228,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05323008633907535,0.0752083159799415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16500516517729535,0.0,0.05983007725798985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10423857254603147,0.4654706525804707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1080422847245748,0.11190215653438232,0.0,0.12475110809588985,0.07056345853702088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2153011676909043,0.0,0.20572773791957308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07027172575280062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07805990725211105,0.0,0.10167502787020803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08104566040529879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993987866286178,0.0,0.0,0.4178820362423123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07147465770653719,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0909235994976976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10691163803780657,0.0,0.07478417538852747,0.0,0.0,0.06779349964138126
mentalhealth,Tim8819,2020/04/20,"I don't know if I can do this....seriously I have severe anxiety, depression, and PTSD and quarantine is literally driving me insane. I haven't had any physical contact with another human being in weeks. I haven't had therapy in longer. Everyday is a roller coaster of crying, contemplating dying, and wishing I was dead because I hurt so much. I am so isolated and so lonely. I just want someone to hold me and tell me everything is ok. I'm unwell, I'm scared, and I don't know if I can do this...",3.216893939393941,4.852569212121214,5.923118686868688,74.63801136363638,74.05050505050505,9.798484848484847,30.556818181818183,10.125756701596842,3.4865242424242417,388,18,73,12,8,140,61,99,0.293,0.6509999999999999,0.055,-0.9764,0,3,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,1,1,1,17,0,0,0,0,15,23,11,2,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,1,7,0,1,2,1,0,1,4,4,0,0,3,0,14,1,5,19,1,5,0,3,0,0,3,2,0,2,2,51,15,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16030778669823587,0.24718855204394136,0.1803365206465434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14370178103547088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589436715550117,0.0,0.0,0.20303808721942335,0.0,0.24465556420662504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2118632895247839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2523590403893181,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2591074252130551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1732922441607168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2755614332430519,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23601171649680205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26631328955858274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19973737965351213,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2060426557680111,0.0,0.2695833538889227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13904252655111166,0.0,0.18909228326765698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27108345209527324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Gaoo_httml,2020/04/20,"I'm exaggerating or it's worse than what I think? I live with my mom (I'm 19) and we've never had a ""good"" relationship.
But the thing is that the more I grow, the more I notice things. And it has got to a point where I'm not sure if I'm just exaggerating and we just have a ""normal bad relationship"" of I'm blind and I don't see that something's really bad at home, cuz sometimes it feels like that.

There has never really been fiscal abuse or harsh insults, but sometimes something feels really off.

A few events lately have made sound the alarms, but I may be exaggerating. I just don't know.

For years I've been trying to avoid hee as much as possible, but it's not easy while living together (specially now in quarantine) and that also may have been worse for the relationship in general, but...idk


I'm gonna do research now but I guess I just wanted to vent.
If anyone can like, tell me places to check or something it would help.",2.2878564829072983,4.161640366492147,3.989670465044657,86.46991992608564,77.27225130890052,7.426054819833692,20.659377887280566,8.313332769828598,0.9220228518632588,734,18,159,14,17,246,106,191,0.18100000000000002,0.773,0.046,-0.9605,0,2,3,0,1,0,27.0,1,0,0,0,9,10,1,2,9,0,18,1,0,2,3,40,34,20,0,5,16,1,2,2,0,4,1,1,1,0,12,7,0,1,4,0,1,1,6,5,0,0,6,5,12,5,15,23,4,16,0,0,2,0,8,7,0,8,10,100,24,1,0.0,0.15186061951849025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10249758910802484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961951965814986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21403337312018866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1296133154307423,0.0915647508067937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.107503005650119,0.10250934397680704,0.0,0.14119382405250214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08590972172187789,0.0,0.1285650687348011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07043893945120533,0.0,0.14458146458725973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1252348813505884,0.0,0.2263531072022805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12127765526878563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15011128148939976,0.0,0.0,0.09421977686485222,0.0,0.19770537754292236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1255794928069613,0.0,0.14592251753068178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13391048330451555,0.0,0.12116218035562933,0.14449253892366706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24632715961692986,0.0,0.0,0.4128201891936481,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10213498188302003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29601483302574205,0.2535270283426284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12079881001448027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11202632376956842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17030104923318104,0.08212622996193329,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08701909006505912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559805050606393,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26123257998113925,0.09104836738490947,0.0,0.0,0.08253734736779783
mentalhealth,str3ssch1ck3n,2020/04/20,"I desperately need help. I feel like the world is falling apart right now. I feel like there’s no one who cares about me. I have been going to therapy for over 5 years now and I’m still as depressed, suicidal and sad. The only difference is more trauma and a bigger understanding of who I am. But that makes me hate myself even more. With quarantine I just feel lonely. I have no structure, no motivation, nothing to distract me. I just want to end myself. I don’t have the motivation to call my therapist because I’m so scared. I just want to be done with being alive and existing. I’m only 17 and I feel like I can’t be alive any longer.",1.0549487179487187,3.445320238461541,3.129999999999999,88.05833333333334,85.07692307692307,6.5435897435897425,20.974358974358974,7.793537801064563,1.0176820512820517,501,16,105,10,15,169,79,130,0.23399999999999999,0.579,0.187,-0.8763,0,3,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,0,0,2,10,11,1,2,4,0,13,0,0,3,0,22,28,8,1,3,4,0,4,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,7,0,0,7,0,0,2,5,7,0,1,2,4,18,4,12,23,2,12,0,3,0,0,4,5,0,0,8,71,21,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767234033210845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10548286663184367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17669199560110047,0.0,0.17642462288361324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14903809348100264,0.0,0.0,0.18078875125832736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1770788041658061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1532610455706269,0.0,0.0,0.11429051736212904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34997453320946137,0.37085693104391815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09834195659044058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17084002344715166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11598428239355756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25361410012095226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1155047648312104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283061022525385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16603542734091056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1172555916581968,0.2632076601578728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14777421808678906,0.0,0.0,0.17324205890419425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381890357188669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18927639818440256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1978849862508746,0.2009114223149734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18013952790598825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20412557420878774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11143133528139386
mentalhealth,superdelikia,2020/04/20,"MY SITUATION IS STRANGE, I AM A MUSICIAN BUT I CAN'T PLAY MUSIC ANYMORE Hi guys, I'm 26 and i'm an Italian musician. I have a degree in classical guitar, i teach music at secondary school(love my job because teaching is different than playing). I love to listen music, from classical to jazz to electronic to rap and a lot of various kind of music. The problem is that i don't know if music is my way. I start lot of projects and never finish one, i don't know what instrument and what kind of music i have to play, there's no passione anymore. I want to play because i think i have to but i don't feel the beauty of music and this situation make me anxious. I'm constantly undecided, the problem is that maybe music is not my way and I can't accepted because i studied for many years and without music i think i'm lost. I have many passion and i'm good at it. I'm a mountain bike guide and a personal trainer, I train every day and love to help people with body issues and problems. I feel that i have to let go music playing but I can't,  for me is like an addiction. When i play music i do for 7 hours a day, smoke a lot of cigarettes and get angry.  Music is freedom and for me is a jail! When I stop playing music i feel good the first 5/6 days and next I need to think about a new project, new way of playing to build a career. Please help me, i need someone that tell me to stop playing, people don't understand and they always tell me ""but music is a nice thing and you're a good musician, you only have to find your way"". Well it's a lot of time that i'm trying to find my way but i'm tired, and the time goes on. Sorry for my english, i know that probably there isn't a solution, i have only to stop playing but it's difficult because i always find a reason to start playing again an get bad.  Sorry for the outburst!",2.6853020617628545,3.8202840000000013,4.718914198253356,84.75323759791124,74.53524804177546,7.475970108940308,27.567209867651034,7.990435384864732,1.712409813631044,1424,55,298,21,29,492,154,383,0.152,0.662,0.18600000000000005,0.9544,2,0,2,0,0,0,39.0,0,2,1,2,7,30,0,0,24,0,28,7,1,2,1,57,59,26,0,7,9,0,3,1,0,0,2,1,0,2,13,18,0,3,15,15,0,1,12,6,1,2,1,4,45,24,39,57,5,32,0,1,0,4,13,4,0,5,23,189,58,6,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08832379724027478,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13483031912751234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09152957820090236,0.1607002081270545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06764834508017342,0.19755624552865927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0899949943110831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08755387502346791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15675366001319693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08464869242003452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06826287391783663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1228984923438162,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2221525327760684,0.06891560044739661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0846592486982125,0.0,0.046045553041703165,0.20386728435919174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802225726780045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10861204336614892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07978841430760493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08456386695444178,0.08039988321742872,0.0,0.0,0.16873979766759126,0.1335794772640654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08284847514155823,0.0,0.03958229665857686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0884429390616532,0.2755213460743907,0.14624748978072127,0.0,0.05408150254478397,0.16428319794147805,0.08139551506772262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12015065881692524,0.06248764577811551,0.15649930949033192,0.08616572645665305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05490127258316733,0.12323877515733707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11233818189721603,0.07074356954080589,0.0,0.08893566865464488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08735330108611596,0.23257569472185546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08330208992694853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199660095116472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18213982806590612,0.0,0.0,0.06864801280079517,0.0,0.0,0.18139059212147493,0.11469279567067273,0.0,0.0,0.2032091314841896,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1416301635198061,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053826111218517984,0.15574310109513945,0.0,0.0,0.09448686799852933,0.09312061179238168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0550072855225076,0.0,0.0,0.08434471384016408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04778771584514365,0.3215496633595599,0.0,0.0,0.07284674164927915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0781004226075391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05217424624339827
mentalhealth,crashdull,2020/04/20,"How can i get over paranoia Paranoia has been popping up lately, and i’m scared of it,please help me.",7.0128571428571425,5.1897102857142885,6.647619047619048,84.80571428571429,65.19047619047619,8.4,35.285714285714285,3.1291,1.8419142857142856,80,3,17,0,1,25,19,21,0.292,0.593,0.114,-0.4939,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,3,0,0,1,0,2,5,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,3,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,10,2,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25487264883710875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3269842292957389,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5502969608208492,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5354942264349993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4884060145337544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Greysonthealien,2020/04/20,"How to stop feeling hopeless and like there's no point? I'm kinda just seeking advice. I have as my sister puts it ""extreme peter pan syndrome"" I really struggle with the thought of being grown up and having a future and all of that when I was 18 I tried to kill myself bc im was and just am really scared of being an adult and feeling like won't succeed and I'm not good enough. well I'm doing better than before and I'm medicared now but I just have days where I feel like me going to school and just everything I do has no point. Like no matter what I'm doing I'm going to fail at being an adult and always be a fuck up. does anyone have any advice how to cope with these days? they're just so heavy and I tend to feel suicidal on these days.",1.564098214285714,3.1820123562500022,3.395892857142858,91.07125000000003,78.5625,5.571428571428572,18.92857142857143,6.1826913282559595,-0.10320535714285706,587,12,127,4,14,197,95,160,0.22399999999999998,0.685,0.091,-0.975,0,0,0,0,0,4,9.0,0,0,0,3,13,14,2,2,5,0,16,1,0,2,1,30,31,16,2,0,7,1,4,4,0,1,0,0,0,2,5,12,0,1,5,0,0,4,5,6,1,0,3,4,11,8,17,23,2,18,0,2,0,1,3,7,1,1,11,84,16,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3026961751983778,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12887354139516335,0.0,0.0,0.10532450726008424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1082965158047901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13179246883160736,0.0,0.0,0.13697980930652678,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29965662654034275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13553755631144293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16003365180499945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13919720953856815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3132502945027815,0.22129427876280391,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14318514670228222,0.0,0.0,0.17604507723136495,0.12990697779746274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672982422292709,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1713530679591188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30266846685250354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29282553688922824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15569835514175426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1984416879742261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1550630712307496,0.15674801358215232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12948759392628895,0.0,0.16191542804983108,0.0,0.16941486264717429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12295834923738752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10515414832054544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.139256773049134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwaway78281911,2020/04/20,"Is there any way to stop being attracted to things like rape? Whenever I hear the words ""rape"", ""sexual harassment"" etc. I feel turned on. I'm 99% sure where it came from. When I was 10-11 I met a girl on a social media app. We chatted and roleplayed with our furry characters. Eventually she asked if we could roleplay ""hentai"" and I said yes. So we roleplayed that. But one day, she implemented rape into it. I was young and didn't know it was very fucking wrong, so I went with it. Is there any way to stop these thoughts? I don't wanna be this way. I just want to be normal",0.26333333333333186,2.6187254188034217,2.1767863247863275,93.34876923076924,89.68376068376068,5.513162393162394,18.056410256410253,7.0316486544052195,0.2060830769230768,442,12,97,7,15,146,80,117,0.172,0.7340000000000001,0.094,-0.9141,0,0,0,0,0,0,23.0,4,0,0,0,7,9,5,0,3,1,11,4,0,0,1,24,24,8,0,5,3,0,1,1,0,0,0,2,0,1,8,10,0,2,3,1,0,2,2,6,0,1,9,3,15,3,11,11,1,14,0,0,0,4,13,4,1,1,6,62,23,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2602731469343759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17890293265110374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21887362613421532,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15279150758844434,0.0,0.0,0.12341631151554976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21342553057683253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09676124062824996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17691632126242454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21568526495986054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10517066317123483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09349257403950674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18749967904278886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12967568143200964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1820344707570233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19507523345569086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3199838711510232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18036175811987606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12713617230862695,0.0,0.0,0.15192454885568324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2081530652966961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1578983640431312,0.1128736061065042,0.4556962316006702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17739974130923966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092304986548492,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,coastalsagebrush,2020/04/20,"Shaking from a Zoom conference hijacking I'm a college student and my department has an annual conference to showcase student and professor research and it's something that I always enjoyed going to. With COVID this year, it ended up being hosted on Zoom. First few presentations went great. The last presentation of the first panel starts having issues. The presenters powerpoint stops working. Then someone starts drawing on the screen. They drew a swastika. Probably to see if they could hijack the screen. Then they started playing graphic child porn. The professor running the zoom is able to block the person and turn off screen sharing but then someone starts playing the video as their camera icon square thing. I left. Could not deal with that more. 

I'm so shaken right now and I don't know what to do. I wanna cry but I feel like I'm overreacting. My mental health was so fragile before this and idk. It's so messed up. Idk why someone would do that and why they would have those images. It's not funny. I don't know what to do with myself right now.",3.3289818101153514,6.316570811224494,3.6273558118899736,84.23441437444544,80.68367346938777,6.0617568766637095,25.35847382431233,7.423996415210882,1.6145286601597166,853,33,144,13,23,264,117,196,0.109,0.8240000000000001,0.068,-0.7992,1,0,1,0,0,0,20.0,0,0,5,3,5,8,0,1,13,0,15,2,0,0,0,25,29,17,0,6,5,0,2,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,13,10,0,2,3,3,0,5,4,2,0,2,2,7,14,6,18,22,2,32,0,0,5,1,9,8,0,1,20,97,27,7,0.14185446089074313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11803427518503035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12070769814329242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2265184884374425,0.0,0.15582046431615762,0.0,0.1462457203698808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1256409477145178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07172587767600673,0.1013408552042084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2413226639345624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0806191591615434,0.0,0.0,0.1563950439222838,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1507846585132157,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14805920222396252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15591900378181267,0.11563031868864185,0.0,0.0,0.15412528681834325,0.0,0.0,0.06930292424562877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14295593205259324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12386184366817167,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15294310130599567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24228586904217703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303963937095785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3605784731328052,0.10920649437561332,0.0,0.0,0.4016212701574852,0.0,0.0,0.1185966811269506,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09424180058044818,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542969189152561,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13150050642474792,0.25600317380788745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327173700693618,0.0,0.0,0.2015386780269397,0.0,0.0,0.0913496219324484
mentalhealth,gh0stb_c,2020/04/20,"Trigger? Help
So today while I vaccuumed the house my dad came up to me and patted my arm like when you pet a dog,but like its me and my arm,and like I know he didnt mean anything bad,but that trigerred me so bad,I usually have a touching trigger,like two weeks ago the same stuff happened and I cried for two hours,and yea contuinuing today,I got triggered so bad that I decided to go to sleep since I couldnt function,and like as I closed my eyes I felt hands touching me and like all over my hands and legs and like I twisted and turned,flinched and even verbally told them to stop touching me,but like no one was there I wasnt dreaming,idk why I felt like that but it was horrible,can anyone explain?
(I have never been abused or rap*d to feel this way,I mean not that I'm concious about it)",3.81279220779221,4.241376642857143,4.413982683982685,90.61889610389612,71.26190476190476,7.537662337662339,27.772727272727273,7.348242739294969,1.1880642857142858,628,21,144,6,11,200,97,168,0.051,0.82,0.13,0.8409,0,0,0,0,1,0,18.0,0,1,1,0,7,9,0,0,4,1,8,6,6,2,2,28,21,16,0,1,3,1,8,8,0,0,0,0,1,0,9,10,0,1,8,0,0,2,6,1,0,3,10,9,22,8,10,10,2,13,0,0,1,0,7,3,0,1,16,78,31,0,0.0,0.15728439063701294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11767288127811501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09282032157716592,0.0,0.10924009710423843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3325165086307424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15182807507134474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14581718296283855,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0876786446830454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712125698092873,0.0,0.2549173378793396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0754436121940755,0.0,0.10617051183588076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11738840733759776,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0889780265197436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1531730940407502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07295469822149203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5188308084658535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2892024578409453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10238325752619802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08995331892255409,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1098103203235813,0.0,0.13284363062796226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1109830729010397,0.0,0.0,0.1519644276166305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2516587127619083,0.12684617516304514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25935054851360034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14620290514034048,0.0,0.0,0.10536899440283873,0.10648224727995743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11978420741472925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MCCreepers13,2020/04/20,"I feel like a lost cause. I could honestly post this in 3 different subreddits but I feel like posting here first. So my mom made me a daily schedule to follow 3ish weeks ago and it went like this: 

10 am- Wake up 

10:30 am- Shower, brush teeth, get dressed

11:30 am- Activity time: writing, drawing, anything other than being on my phone)

12:30 pm- Exercise: Take the dog for a walk, bike ride around the block, do stretches, or walk on the treadmill

1:00 pm- Lunch: eat a sandwich, fruit + chips (make healthier options) 

1:30 pm- Chores: Take out the trash if needed, empty the dishwasher, wipe off counter or the table 

(2-4 pm is break time until dinner)

8:00 pm- take meds

10 pm- go to bed, lights out, no video games because i go to sleep too late.


So yeah thats my schedule that i stopped following after a week. I told my mom i wanted to follow it but i couldnt get myself to do it but she just called me lazy. I really want to start becoming better because i really dont like laying on the couch everyday (this has been post quarantine, ive been like this for years) not showering or brushing my teeth and sitting on my phone until its night and then having a wave of depression because the day went by so fast. I dont know what to do anymore because any advice anyone gives me or anything anyone says to me (just like my dad says) goes in one ear and out the other. I honestly feel like a lost cause and i dont think theres any hope for me.",1.7560919540229882,4.0495864482758614,2.9503448275862105,91.12747126436784,81.06896551724137,6.073563218390802,21.73563218390805,7.3011,0.7356459770114943,1130,35,234,16,30,363,168,290,0.079,0.7879999999999999,0.132,0.943,3,1,0,0,0,0,51.0,0,0,0,4,9,14,0,0,16,1,18,11,5,4,0,39,46,19,0,7,11,3,3,7,0,0,1,3,5,0,13,9,5,2,5,4,0,10,6,3,0,2,8,10,28,11,29,35,0,48,0,3,0,0,13,13,0,7,27,129,41,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09331954420229384,0.08465321847704202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298838348968332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09470835883388808,0.13354884959449842,0.0,0.15717344057824564,0.08501347026326947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23285878729679166,0.10547004245968464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08446022392601882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09751413934436406,0.0,0.0,0.19620551237394807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07624738540645305,0.0,0.0,0.061588312191512715,0.0,0.08225229086288237,0.0,0.0,0.09977508840806998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3357688481731279,0.0,0.0,0.09771829913814016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14485998056504618,0.20467137929826296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08123055337009326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09978753105258527,0.091610387256061,0.10854743278815396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0948510657419396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052483205479385404,0.0,0.10772590804976684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3265885065577773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20849470468270206,0.0,0.0,0.09036252037751016,0.06374565918716978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10607675389852653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22369221605443185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07081055987410183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08961840748979744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06471191898062438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.274382069077252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12235693338610668,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15188769149190834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09556697146094137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06759397871751205,0.0,0.0,0.0798406074152321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2154078422793083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06119126488730304,0.0,0.0,0.11137130814939357,0.0,0.0,0.0912524352461102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265439398897187,0.0,0.1532054768271082,0.0,0.0,0.1770552128203971,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061497583515269974
mentalhealth,anonthrowawayiguess,2020/04/20,"Could someone give me an idea of what's wrong with my dad? (long-ish but please help) Okay, so I know Reddit isn't exactly a professional medical place where I could get a diagnosis or anything, and that's not what I'm asking for. I'm wondering if anyone has a few ideas on what's wrong with my dad like what kind of illnesses he possibly has, because somehow I feel like it would help.

Some background info first: there's a pretty big age gap between my dad and my mom(25ish years, my dad is 75 but I don't think its because he's becoming senile, he's always been like this according to relatives) long story short he was a pretty manipulative boyfriend and sorta forced my mom into a marriage. My mom is his second wife. He had two kids with his first wife and then cheated on her with another woman, the other woman left her and he married my mom. His two other daughters cut ties with him since they're adults (unlike me) and have not spoken to him in years.

For as long as I can remember, my dad's always been like this. A typical day involves him *randomly* bursting into VIOLENTLY angry tantrums. A lot of times he'll just get angry for no reason, or randomly bring up something that happened a long time ago and get angry as if it just happened. Or me and my mom will be talking about something and he butt in our conversation and will find some way to act as if whatever he is pissed about has anything to do with what we're talking about and take out his anger on us. The other times, he overreacts to everything. He used to be physically abusive but over the years as he got older he has stopped mostly because he himself has back pain and leg pain from getting old. 

He fights every single day with my mom over small things. My mom mostly tries to ignore him so it's mostly a one-sided argument with him just shouting obscenities at my mom. When my mom is not home he takes out his anger on me and verbally abuses me. He often blames me for his fights between him and my mom and used to purposely make me late for school so I would get detention to punish me for ""causing"" the fight even when it was about something that I completely had nothing to do with. Everyday he just tells me that no one loves me, etc...

He doesn't have a job, a college degree or anything and lives off my mom, hasnt worked a single day of his life since they got married. He actually neglected me as a child. He only takes me to school and makes really crappy food for me to eat and that's it. Doesn't really talk to me and isn't interested in my life, he barely knows basic details about me and only talks to me to yell at me. We're like strangers.

He lies a lot too. In public he pretends to be super nice to people and lies about his achievements to make himself look good. He also lies to my mom and will tell her i said bad things about her when I didn't to start drama between me and my mom. 

He also seems to have quite low mental capabilities. I can't think of any  specific examples right now but overall he is a really immature person and is like a child throwing a tantrum when he gets angry. He has extremely poor logical reasoning and lack of common sense. Honestly I don't even know how he has survived this far because he is so gullible. He believes anything on the internet, like fake news. For example he thinks the coronavirus started in the US and was brought to China, and thinks that you can get rid of bacteria on a surface by slapping it with your bare hand( i really dont know how he believes that...?). When people talk to him they often get confused (or scared because my dad blew up at them) because his logical reasoning is all over the place and you can tell he's kind of.. slow when you have a conversation with him.

Somehow he thinks he is the best and the smartest, though. He seems very delusional to me. He has no friends and he blames this on his old friends being jealous of him. He holds grudges against people who allegedly talked shit about him out of jealousy, and these are people who haven't talked to him in decades so they probably have forgotten about him. He really thinks that he's that important I guess. 

**Also he is uncooperative with trying to get tested for mental disorders. He thinks nothing is wrong with himself so thst he doesn't have to (Well then no reason to be afraid of getting tested then, right??? Nope, I guess not. he's still not gonna listen) and probably it will be difficult to get him to therapy since he got mad at my mom for going to therapy once, so if anyone could offer advice for getting help for him that'd be appreciated.**

My mother said that a long time ago he was diagnosed with a thyroid cyst and thinks that's why he's so angry, but I kinda doubt it. I think that's not the reason why he is the way he is. My friend says he might be on the autistic spectrum but idk? 

If anyone has advice that'd be great, it's kinda weird but I'm honestly really curious as to knowing what's my dad's issue. So far it kinda seems like he has narcissistic personality disorder but it doesnt fully explain the anger and low intelligence. If anyone has similar experiences with parents and feels comfortable with sharing feel free to do so. 

\--

Also, I know that people will probably try and tell me to get out of this, but tbh it's gonna be kinda hard. My mom works a demanding day job so she's not home most of the time, and she's already super stressed from her job that trying to get authorities involved and a divorce would be adding more to her stress. My dad doesn't want a divorce which if i recall correctly kinda makes the divorce process harder too. I also don't know how it works but I'm worried that if my parents do get divorced the authorities will deem my mom unfit to take care of me alone or something. Overall I don't want any risk of getting into a foster home or anything so I'll just wait until I'm old enough to move out. I'm kinda used to it anyway and I'm not in any immediate danger, it's just more of an inconvenience that makes me mad at this point.",4.455678161149578,5.420114665282392,5.434791258055482,81.93464135612217,70.12126245847176,8.526662130248571,28.459512468478565,8.807327854380718,2.100598258815995,4763,168,949,82,83,1568,422,1204,0.195,0.705,0.1,-0.9992,5,1,4,0,8,0,116.0,3,4,4,11,57,67,18,7,45,1,88,17,5,18,3,195,173,102,0,17,39,29,5,8,3,13,9,6,3,8,55,63,2,5,36,2,2,6,29,38,1,6,15,12,116,30,141,129,18,102,0,3,1,2,179,49,3,45,53,595,171,13,0.0,0.07505571573268803,0.030908717341633207,0.0,0.0,0.06190185571149887,0.056153203066663056,0.0,0.0,0.03280414102329678,0.034952438658124765,0.12664622888689525,0.05270969386544157,0.0,0.0,0.06461709448782017,0.033212373008009735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0885872481343742,0.0,0.13032274915616301,0.0,0.029610399278414568,0.0,0.0,0.024354927248922145,0.02644600697197415,0.11584704342174355,0.03498083604047745,0.0,0.07137026162536059,0.03323933070166128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032293192250826754,0.032537357047212986,0.0,0.0,0.03320900873652476,0.0,0.0,0.07586601536937132,0.0,0.0,0.0817070174824119,0.0,0.0,0.032147884084425885,0.0,0.0,0.07260103338460437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03712104641762391,0.0,0.0,0.0324098456830737,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.032727139735165105,0.035324268210359604,0.04184002878165706,0.0,0.026686246905501858,0.0,0.028466053707658145,0.030982710848099063,0.0,0.0,0.04804514259022497,0.02262751834372817,0.0,0.0,0.028948958636385518,0.05388283919583399,0.03829966033877609,0.0,0.07341248454455031,0.0,0.2647691178445345,0.030384058463177908,0.018000751020976282,0.02656618634267607,0.07599645193595535,0.03492008941594851,0.06978375009200757,0.0,0.056017452817535694,0.0,0.02837318906663036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0636901357904032,0.0,0.09531315573493183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07151093738742925,0.0,0.033058851807887105,0.09429303272359862,0.0,0.0,0.06596604632793164,0.12184829493345314,0.0,0.03572903014845066,0.0,0.034413295089003766,0.0,0.04474378754556905,0.12379237862021494,0.0,0.02796823581263684,0.14015002860485984,0.02659772005618305,0.0,0.0,0.05385526749084193,0.0285865243990146,0.0,0.10571136601044318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03190766772142728,0.06383877397416085,0.03360052414882464,0.0,0.5935289718933927,0.0,0.03366386380310542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06078305723918561,0.0,0.09970787025168072,0.03373118954920225,0.0429254976092602,0.048178170554887684,0.06740556590777133,0.0,0.0703392337828402,0.0,0.0,0.10979190762729372,0.05531206805077677,0.06618402585475311,0.03476793571979414,0.029941647133928405,0.03570705480240929,0.0,0.06444656902782689,0.10244800549712683,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033688611847059034,0.0,0.0,0.12174493511267193,0.16282790424342272,0.0,0.0,0.035879843425573266,0.0540979048887118,0.060257406423427765,0.025187997979028005,0.031710647996186433,0.06411044284565152,0.0,0.08650295538328165,0.0,0.0,0.032512340309893986,0.07860181312343091,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.02683681061215025,0.09753507407290246,0.0,0.0,0.04483726054712885,0.0,0.02529445734096693,0.026480421665061246,0.07256365779082917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0952579675628212,0.17820543015056614,0.11073596220122137,0.0,0.07244269875829508,0.0,0.04208486433399485,0.1826556052118153,0.03111900289565568,0.0,0.09234521431705592,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08601677127288446,0.0,0.06188071481701352,0.0,0.07619851876277446,0.08206707152147882,0.0,0.02613391259406349,0.03736364178362688,0.050281819186942134,0.0,0.0,0.028478234541572882,0.0,0.05716072259029099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034348504416724546,0.06917594445412019,0.03216592499563072,0.0,0.06749972838944318,0.10388983312767923,0.0,0.0611899882373384
mentalhealth,idontknow1081,2020/04/20,"I feel like I’ve lost confidence to do anything in life. I want to do things but at the same time I don’t want to because it feels cringey. I want to draw as a hobby to separate myself from video games a bit more but I feel like I won’t impress anyone. I used to play the violin from 3rd grade to 9th grade but I stopped because I feel like I didn’t advance and no one from my family would show up to the time I had a concert to play in. I also feel like I can’t even socialize online anymore because I may feel bad on what I say or I’ll screw up or people will attack me. I have a therapist to talk to but I never tell her the important stuff that goes on in my life because I’m afraid that my parents and brother will feel like I’m a mentally sick person for thinking and wanting to do some weird actions and I will feel embarrassed since I feel like I’m the only person who has ever done or thought of stuff like this. I have absolutely no idea what I want to do for a job and my time is running out since I have a few years left of school. I don’t want to think about sick actions anymore and I just want to be a normal person with normal thoughts. I feel like I can’t talk to anyone in real life because the only topic I know is gaming but a normal person doesn’t do gaming for so long. I feel like I am going to be left out forever and I don’t know what to do.

I have never impressed anyone.
I am bad at explaining stuff too so I am sorry if anything is out of context and let me know if something needs to be explained; thanks.",2.8103916960438724,3.379596786786788,4.514179396788094,88.48551116333729,73.62462462462463,7.232745789267526,25.589371980676326,7.255503002510835,1.0230024546285406,1202,37,271,12,23,408,145,333,0.13,0.711,0.159,0.6312,2,0,1,0,0,0,13.0,0,0,0,2,8,22,2,2,15,0,36,6,0,1,3,65,71,22,0,14,11,2,11,9,0,6,5,2,0,4,12,12,0,1,21,8,0,5,12,8,0,1,6,13,41,14,44,55,5,29,0,1,0,1,18,15,1,7,18,182,53,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054902842538250514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1361732938929466,0.1440141105453519,0.0,0.11299332698587933,0.0,0.0,0.07810421112570788,0.0,0.0,0.11464699496457048,0.20925521034088973,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07495274655483647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07025721540533622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045345537174397536,0.06210177161392376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06472119182234523,0.0,0.3818506103836372,0.3923733339953027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03901783762379271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07750238142998862,0.0,0.0,0.06812882854308089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11319187216711145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14918625987523804,0.07020370343960099,0.1454777499359974,0.3018693379927785,0.0,0.0,0.06075692122736495,0.0,0.0,0.07494431073839343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0691874165173226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0509063154466252,0.10590090271064334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2017999987984348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046521950492146184,0.10442942261305972,0.0,0.0,0.07623250827486877,0.0,0.0,0.04759626772478805,0.2397852497739099,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814365737521517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05459667844241045,0.0,0.06948184678589611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11358314171862045,0.0,0.0,0.06998444313421846,0.0,0.052853457035854035,0.0,0.07685290112021571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05739809364247767,0.0,0.0,0.2357783457962759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1103634990275107,0.060006910090123676,0.0632076826509951,0.0,0.07971296814134042,0.04561088593163869,0.08798184447261609,0.0,0.10900773780180946,0.12009867499501063,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05929529768237371,0.0,0.0,0.2834587163929425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048770065924478384,0.0,0.0,0.04421113731058776
mentalhealth,Inquirewithininc,2020/04/20,"American Spirit - My Story It's 420. This day often feels like a second birthday of sorts for some people. Therefore, I present a gift to my tribe.

American Spirit is a documentary by Robert Champion. This series focuses on numerous topics, including mental health, music, pastoral living, growth and wellness. The journey begins as Robert reflects at age 32 on his early years  and struggles. It tells the very true story about his time as a drug addict,  illicit drug dealer and cannabis cultivator in the the windy city and suburbs of Illinois, long before the advent of widespread American decriminalization. You may watch the entire episode at 

https://inquirewithininc.com/2020/04/18/american-spirit-episode-01-pussywillow-sparks/",10.146272727272727,14.06243653636364,8.009090909090908,57.23363636363641,60.90909090909091,8.763636363636364,33.72727272727273,9.3871,3.9716545454545455,609,25,69,12,10,180,84,110,0.021,0.8,0.179,0.9501,0,0,2,0,0,0,29.0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,10,0,2,4,0,1,1,12,4,6,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,4,0,0,0,4,4,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,1,1,1,0,2,6,3,14,3,1,15,3,0,1,0,4,5,0,4,9,44,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26438149379602605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2063657962089128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15640468400433122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5624900622174915,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12262488708732555,0.17325561330713465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2577863432805251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11848252730805535,0.0,0.21414870933825,0.21462167253244385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444020985786645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16813213011845407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2535335025152575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21197228475174465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414147720438372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2001035635379139,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21805369534800234,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15617427681451004
mentalhealth,Burgerboris,2020/04/20,I fucking envy Americans and their guns It'd be so much fucking easier if I could just point a boomstick to my head and press the exit button to get out of this fucking shithole chaos dimension I find myself trapped in.,8.70767441860465,7.026151046511633,8.711279069767446,70.9008720930233,61.79069767441861,11.390697674418604,40.1046511627907,10.125756701596842,4.125381395348837,177,8,31,3,2,58,37,43,0.207,0.721,0.071,-0.7517,0,1,0,1,0,0,1.0,0,0,1,0,2,3,3,0,2,0,3,4,1,0,0,7,7,4,0,2,2,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,1,6,0,5,4,1,4,0,0,0,3,1,4,3,1,0,23,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2312059938004372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2646707904096186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.8031358782159803,0.15129355034875958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2971925301770194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21287455241817027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2737466142613611,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throw3991,2020/04/20,I'm a cyber stalker and I need help 30M 31F I know what I'm doing. I was rejected. Dumped. The woman stopped talking to me but I believe that she is talking to her ex. She said she had to work on herself. I don't know why i'm so obsessed. Maybe because I actually want proof to throw in their face. We're in our thirties. Obviously talking to a psych isn't going to work with the situation in the world. Is there a book anyone can point me to self help for this please? I keep making up scenarios in my head and it's killing me. I can't sleep. I feel awful because I can acknowledge these feelings even though I don't want to feel them. I feel vindictive and I just want it to drop off my chest.,-0.12648023862788804,2.052807093959732,2.210145413870247,93.96057233407906,88.79865771812081,5.190305741983595,21.700596569724087,6.691623216298621,0.4377021625652495,543,20,124,7,18,184,92,149,0.11900000000000001,0.769,0.111,-0.484,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,1,0,2,2,5,4,2,1,6,1,11,4,4,1,2,22,28,6,1,4,2,1,4,0,0,0,0,1,0,2,6,4,0,2,7,1,0,2,4,4,0,0,3,5,26,0,18,25,0,13,0,1,0,0,17,9,0,0,1,76,32,4,0.0,0.0,0.16037662162256555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11491356481731108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20036588430794425,0.0,0.0,0.18516008473079454,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10854805766324473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33239026901172913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09340082292980006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.168664971983526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2203134409374489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14607703076209164,0.1818229491063124,0.0,0.180638987246628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10970129598374047,0.0,0.16510623910271602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12185943774955435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1804010179361417,0.15535876691609998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15632934817567215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17144725897365856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1847302150355352,0.1644632866957082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.137399443621141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3962818902204851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16146773408632115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2908041075212657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1482954384229252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2392896508014899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,petralkaa,2020/04/20,"Feeling severely suicidal Hi. I don't know what else to do because I've tried hotlines and with the virus, I don't have access to any kind of therapy. I've been feeling really terrible the past couple days. For some context, I'm diagnosed with depression, social anxiety and ADHD and I was on meds for all 3 but I haven't been taking them for like the past year because I feel the urge to vomit every time I swallow pills. I've attempted suicide once before when I was 13 in 2017 and got hospitalized because of it. I'm really close to trying again and I don't know what to do. I don't want to be hospitalized because I'd feel guilty just taking up space when people need it for COVID-19. But at the same time, I'm worried I'm gonna actually follow through on my plans if I don't get help. I self harm and relapsed really badly last night. Should I talk to my mom about it and go to the hospital or should I just try to push through it? I feel so stupidly guilty all the time bringing my mom into it because she's already stressed enough and it puts strain on my sister too but I don't know what to do. I'm genuinely stumped. I'm just tired of feeling so bad and useless all the time, I can't even bring myself to try in my online classes because I've convinced myself I'll be dead before I graduate next year anyways. I'm worried because I already have a suicide plan in place and I'm very close to actually doing it. I don't see any reason to keep going if the only reason I'm living is so I don't hurt other people. But I'm tired. Please help. Thank you.",2.9129357798165145,4.161929443425077,4.6671633027522965,84.89824954128444,74.13761467889908,7.433834862385321,27.147278287461766,7.9765259561132025,1.6416396085626923,1236,46,256,18,25,420,156,327,0.245,0.695,0.06,-0.9969,0,0,0,0,0,3,24.0,0,1,1,3,14,14,1,2,10,0,25,6,0,2,3,46,59,22,4,6,10,3,6,1,0,3,5,0,0,1,11,15,1,1,11,0,0,7,10,10,0,0,5,7,30,4,34,49,6,35,0,3,1,0,12,13,0,4,16,145,41,2,0.0,0.0,0.16656996325936055,0.0,0.10256881037178434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18836195493841426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11607585152323148,0.0,0.06528914042768295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1425200004577661,0.3641811436567154,0.0,0.14524561701676586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09443326867863558,0.0,0.055040843128683736,0.0,0.07350802899551873,0.0866239742597816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129528660339031,0.0,0.0,0.08818480564911016,0.0,0.05636995527750158,0.0,0.07190733794365843,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25891975870719336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044589546680424315,0.0,0.0970077277249604,0.0,0.06825866236428432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11441069587080853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136421600628966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07585907908804111,0.0,0.08887429549210346,0.14071110784942467,0.06956804430086931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.041695542819370233,0.0,0.0753617168944269,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09479970733364863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1999114399283103,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0632826713251253,0.0,0.0,0.09076599996268866,0.08009105189877493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09089026473992563,0.0,0.06490916470692024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16294403962660148,0.11833576798102804,0.0,0.08916797349702216,0.09368382568967368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08579588750990931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1640237052268072,0.1754989553765318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06800938308133839,0.0,0.08903406038621209,0.09641622061583106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08699907808841964,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09776308151667028,0.0,0.0,0.2800626599738388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1283385200178455,0.06859754996972336,0.0,0.0785747499368651,0.09760011663703456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19906279236312047,0.1961843947482961,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23177620527322906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07041904735970643,0.05033903842033211,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17334517267426822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10991951968196854
mentalhealth,cheiftessjess,2020/04/20,"my mother is the reason i’m taking antidepressants my mental health has been pretty bad in the last 3 years and after finally being referred to a psychiatrist i got prescribed an antipsychotic (quetiapine) and things started to really improve. about 4 weeks ago i had to move back in with my parents due to certain circumstances and since then i feel like my mental health is plummeting again. i had a phone session with my physiatrist and she prescribed my some antidepressants also to help (fluoxetine). i’m opposed you taking tablets but i really feel like i would not need these if it wasn’t for my mother. i know she cares about me etc and she’s letting me live with them again otherwise i would be homeless but she is my main stress everyday and i really struggle to make things work with her. i’ve addressed this in the past and she seems to change her attitude for a week or two then things just go back to normal. saving up to get my own place but don’t think i’ll be able to move until lockdown is over. not sure what advice anyone can give me but i’m willing to try anything right now she really does drive me crazy 😭

tl/dr any ideas on how to cope with my mum during lockdown???",3.1097463909481107,5.429659484978544,4.088094030433087,84.61655774483029,76.46781115879828,7.154818571985955,23.89563012095201,8.150884317080207,1.478975965665236,952,31,182,17,22,307,142,233,0.065,0.86,0.075,-0.2086,1,2,0,0,0,0,15.0,0,1,1,1,10,9,0,2,7,0,18,2,0,3,2,40,36,18,0,5,9,4,2,2,0,3,2,0,1,0,7,12,0,1,8,0,0,4,4,3,0,1,5,2,33,6,29,24,4,31,0,0,0,0,17,8,0,4,21,124,40,2,0.1189192428554648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11620650779876475,0.10541473361483812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09509967554717612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08086916305631353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08315109961465962,0.0,0.09786040429388226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18288311461812806,0.0992926005242206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12124609364321885,0.0,0.12580079081219114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1040670308054531,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13262639066603246,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1202582846223486,0.1699118617142646,0.0,0.13027021782149292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0621303961812358,0.1140781737857827,0.06758454620978767,0.0,0.09511058199109364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25281118848172285,0.0,0.0,0.07970906177596253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13424535028383006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06535490586648683,0.09693505486711627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12160298284492008,0.0,0.11619587043240613,0.0,0.10500787014290226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793795180290771,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396852533877703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25278467061176896,0.0,0.08817711175707227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1165156090523688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13204574604742225,0.0,0.11352187329834723,0.0,0.0,0.12424529811333802,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12098362222353568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3047308482978218,0.1222687876273469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10155638363486308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10825961240120756,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09837122656758827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08417165216708188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13622159090475364,0.12432021276834328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11207997903984476,0.0,0.17882494188986278,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23701398249987501,0.07619864907321171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0807383598347457,0.0,0.116166820627974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907796870410046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08657462512012508,0.0,0.0,0.16895363632952165,0.0,0.0,0.07658009347838995
mentalhealth,internsdontpay,2020/04/20,"Someone asked me if I was ok today, and I nearly cried I was just in my own head listening to music and my sister was staring at me, when I realised I turned to her and she said ""are you okay?"" with a concerned yet jokingly face. I guess I didn't realised the expression I was making, I said ""no, I'm just vibin"" and put my headset back on, but before I knew it my eyes started watering and I felt a pain in my chest. 

These past couple weeks I've been trying to help a friend who's depressed, but no matter what I do they kept pushing me away. It's been hurting me a lot so I decided to talk to them one last time but as always it didn't go well. I ended up getting frustrated and made the decision to tell them that I don't know what to do, and said goodbye. 

I felt an instant feeling of guilt, but also slight relief. I tried to help them so much, I ended up getting jealous and frustrated with myself. Thought it was for the best. I'll try focusing on myself for awhile, though that never ends well.",3.0695853269537494,3.9633820191387588,4.579885167464116,87.04386283891546,73.3062200956938,7.295821371610844,26.373524720893144,7.554174236665415,1.3041748644338118,778,26,166,9,15,261,124,209,0.16699999999999998,0.7170000000000001,0.11599999999999999,-0.9098,0,0,0,0,0,0,24.0,0,1,4,1,12,15,3,1,8,2,13,6,4,2,1,32,34,19,0,1,7,1,3,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,10,10,1,1,8,1,0,3,6,7,2,1,18,9,36,8,23,16,4,25,0,2,2,0,20,9,0,3,13,122,46,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10555577265741074,0.10982980921348982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12339682760387763,0.0,0.12401296473658112,0.10149544863554236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11231740472752677,0.0,0.13851984641258058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14604915281811598,0.14498951122945886,0.0,0.0,0.11368647416685115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3507232444624087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06674027055681032,0.0,0.25347040363864104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10197844811366603,0.0,0.1379231198568716,0.0,0.0750153873168125,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14540657318884692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1354642047386789,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17694595812548694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1413025995215689,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254060064870757,0.10759294976785852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11221681098661564,0.0,0.12489617286982115,0.08810720236974462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09703097831985644,0.0,0.1018021207458546,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08944273561623098,0.0,0.1404512130629469,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12600346931340867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13269070171384945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.376670340834051,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183831941636448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0934262260015773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10609199701188646,0.11536881273376448,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12968370333050766,0.10478870908450684,0.07696692222202962,0.0,0.12511513738844746,0.0,0.0,0.2688463416856012,0.14357186622382975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10587784425701033,0.0,0.23735740711547865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,dramas_4_nerds,2020/04/20,"Anyone else feel like they are living in a Twilight Zone? Where you feel crazy because everyone around you is so fucked up and you can't tell if you're just surrounded by horrible toxic people or if you're the toxic one? 

Is it me or everyone else?",3.4716000000000022,5.116423560000001,4.625,84.1675,73.4,8.200000000000001,24.5,8.841846274778883,1.7687999999999997,198,6,39,4,4,65,38,50,0.213,0.743,0.044000000000000004,-0.8899,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,3,1,0,4,2,1,0,2,0,4,1,0,0,0,9,7,6,0,2,5,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,2,0,0,0,1,1,0,1,0,2,5,1,4,7,0,5,0,0,0,1,5,5,1,4,1,25,6,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18518775656831624,0.2713678939688458,0.0,0.2357707143707316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16144877528951782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4424927448642328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5061468912965866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2678300352150784,0.18920733839377407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2448475455987665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12939126883227886,0.0,0.23386548084028905,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17946773986656867,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18361213371941226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2314886718274841,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,klgeei994,2020/04/20,"Losing my mind? Or is my mind losing me? Literally go through days on auto pilot sometimes. Some days I don’t remember getting out of bed till I realise I am suddenly downstairs and washing up or something. I have black patches in the day have no idea what’s wrong with me atm. Left my house, locked the door but left the key still in the door till I came home after and hour and realised. I just do things and don’t remember doing them or starting them or finishing them it’s dead weird and hard to describe. I already see a therapist (well talk to cause of present situ) cause of depression (had it for 12 years on/off). Between that and getting random bouts of rage.. Just feel like I am guna hurt myself or some one or something and not know it’s happening like I get angry and smash shit but don’t remember. I have ptsd but I have had that a long long time and don’t think it’s related I don’t know it’s never happened like this before. I’ve never felt this way. It’s weird. 
I don’t know how to stop it nor do I know what is wrong with me. 
Feel like I should book myself in to a psych hospital. 
I am losing it!",0.8975536480686692,3.0803452446351933,2.5289201716738208,93.53142317596568,83.67811158798284,5.616412017167383,21.337167381974247,6.918507183188421,0.4608576480686697,874,28,192,11,25,286,121,233,0.201,0.745,0.054000000000000006,-0.9881,0,0,2,1,0,2,23.0,0,0,3,3,5,16,2,0,7,0,21,2,1,3,2,49,38,22,1,1,12,0,4,4,0,1,1,0,4,0,15,13,0,1,12,1,1,2,11,11,1,1,4,6,27,5,22,33,2,30,0,5,2,0,4,8,1,9,23,123,42,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146283092446759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08838971494681684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.118804978860846,0.0,0.213415851299714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20097175534110234,0.0,0.089467122831889,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10504433403355036,0.14841620612022874,0.0997359971921754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16281072303485256,0.0,0.05903438311847931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18371209996172627,0.0,0.09305132389757707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10419478878650476,0.0,0.10229565088261733,0.1198574518646206,0.11120000968019796,0.11726188729491475,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2283472638622578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2257203207006357,0.0,0.0,0.2029917167927492,0.0,0.0,0.1838516731459442,0.0,0.34862764168647226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20976766176287026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16022913733693528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07038818181706613,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12142396007230034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35300934175714155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08277468343260885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10662588198103767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15993563056339352,0.10273472969676016,0.0,0.07352304395627164,0.0,0.08295446582759781,0.08684389645145603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349054535909306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12060652735654093,0.06900973191860556,0.06655871045631262,0.0,0.0,0.06057017015343945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08245089814077809,0.0,0.0,0.09339582590226526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22714134552228504,0.0,0.06689189809189716
mentalhealth,_smallbear_,2020/04/20,"Survey on youth well-being🥰🤗 Hey guys, this survey focuses greatly on mental health so it would be great if you could help out by completing the survey!! The survey is to know the mental health needs of youths(12-25) in this generation so that we could bridge service gaps on this. Hence it would be greatly appreciated if you could spent less than 3 mins of your time to do this survey. Thank you so much☺️🙆🏻‍♀️ !!

https://forms.gle/8yJUtucF4uv6byUV6",2.4692071881606767,5.369958034883727,3.3753699788583567,84.78791754756872,84.93023255813954,5.452854122621565,18.28329809725159,6.980632752743323,0.2909209302325584,365,9,69,5,11,116,59,86,0.0,0.8370000000000001,0.163,0.9332,0,0,0,0,0,0,16.0,1,4,0,0,3,4,0,0,3,0,9,2,0,0,0,11,13,5,0,8,2,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,7,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,5,4,11,5,1,8,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,2,3,41,12,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18198158131703152,0.0,0.0,0.4157371138258552,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.574074325018061,0.0,0.1718585086812361,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3689869742166832,0.0,0.0,0.11633822735060405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09538782326334637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.34982920235077425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12759163459186165,0.12869764925281635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15979707233830803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10120824901343704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15605747814124846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2465938767446722,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,plaguesity,2020/04/20,"hallucinations and delusions help

i don’t know where this post really belongs but i’m struggling mentally. everyday i’m hearing voices, seeing shadows of beings not really there. i stay in a detached mindset for a majority of the day. i am not on any medication, the only mental health issues i’m actually diagnosed with is chronic depression, anxiety, and ptsd. 

i also have frequent dreams of being eaten my maggots, it’s extremely realistic and i can even swear i can feel them when i’m awake some day’s. i do not do any drugs at all, i don’t drink, none of that. 

some friends have said that some of the things i’ve described to them resemble Cotard’s delusion, but i don’t know.

i’m not very good at explaining things so feel free to ask me stuff in comments. i’m also not sure to how reddit works so please go easy on me.",2.9341056910569066,5.084151841463417,4.8630243902439005,79.67059349593498,76.3170731707317,8.031869918699186,27.396747967479683,8.841846274778883,2.385736260162602,658,27,124,15,15,225,102,164,0.11599999999999999,0.75,0.134,0.7116,0,0,2,0,0,0,17.0,0,0,2,1,9,6,0,1,5,0,13,7,0,1,2,22,30,11,0,0,7,0,2,0,1,0,5,3,0,0,7,4,2,0,5,2,1,1,9,2,0,0,2,6,14,5,16,26,6,15,0,1,1,0,9,7,0,3,5,79,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.1533059097605623,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512639411419065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2136653412271307,0.0,0.12018026389507012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14686630796019245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026316477405375,0.0,0.13530909221990847,0.15945212355355515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1538971591475863,0.18218490205455007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10376237237350716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15886789505494636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1213742561846342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08928295150983194,0.1317671426192342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16698883360326375,0.17706193004586926,0.0,0.10530011217870423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1639704843145052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17267494475126424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15826066071600578,0.3166375755400564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1194808277852386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17244746707234754,0.0,0.0,0.1504573643634812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1836402612611263,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20128321545335906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14943707319605354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12518752050518042,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16744657404006166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16423392847580467,0.17984070788143486,0.0,0.0,0.14806389766642009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2087391185651836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12962308340240622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11436990392135815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,figureitoutkid-,2020/04/20,Not eating anymore? Prescribed adderall which I know can make people less hungry but I feel like symptoms should not be this extreme. Take 20mg once every day and I’ve gone from three meals a day to barely one meal a day. Not sure what to do,1.1088435374149626,3.615679918367346,1.8031632653061216,96.68052721088438,86.55102040816327,3.2666666666666666,18.37074829931973,3.1291,-0.7887170068027212,192,5,39,0,6,59,41,49,0.052000000000000005,0.878,0.07,0.204,0,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,2,0,4,4,0,1,1,10,9,2,0,1,4,0,1,1,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,1,3,0,2,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,1,1,2,2,3,6,1,4,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,22,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27672317923629675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5398545734487405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2855177593616369,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.235095146602614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1410861542375438,0.19933937361478035,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15334781064298936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363201591397516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1862549588017488,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29715826958474784,0.18907822050013748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1934445462550056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2629828499452513,0.2900194245802025,0.2097961351454728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,NewBeg2019,2020/04/20,"A little obsession and other doubts Hi, I am a 24 year old female who has never been diagnosed with any mental illness. A couple of years back, I was feeling really bad, I stopped going out, the only thing I did was cry and eat, and really couldn't see the point of living. In this case, although I suspect that I had depression, I didn't go to a therapist or doctor of any kind, and eventually going back to classes helped me get better.

Also at the time I used to have these weird obsessions like checking the stoves were off, then the windows, then that all my family members were safe in their beds. Now I only did these a couple of times before going to bed, sometimes only once. But my real obsession was a tendency to go pee like 5 times in two hours. It wasn't even that I needed to go, and many of the times I just sat in the toilet for a few seconds and then went back to bed.

This also went away went I went back to classes and started going out more, and I didn't even notice it. The only weird thing was that after a year or so I started having anxiety, my chest hurt and I felt as if I was a little short of breath. But again, nothing to go to the doctor, in my opinion.

Then this last year I had a couple of anxiety attacks, one of them in which I nearly passed out. This time I did go to the doctor, got some blood work done, she checked that everything was alright with me physically. Then she told me to try to be mindful of what could be the stressor that had caused the attacks in case it happened again and we will go from there. But it didn't.

And now we come to the current lockdown. I have been in my house confined for the past month and a half almost. My family members do all the grocery shopping and they prefer I don't go out since I've had severe bronchitis and bronchial asthma in the past.

And I've started to feel that life is not worth it again. I don't see the point in anything I do, the long run whatever issue I solve now is going to be substituted by another lately. Mind you, I know that this is irrational thinking, yet I can't stop these thoughts from happening now and again. Nothing overbearing but there are days that are bad.

And the obsession with going to the bathroom is back. I feel like I have to go, not because I have to pee, but just to be safe, like, every 15 min. Last night I went three times in ten minutes. I have read symptoms of OCD are similar, but they affect your life to a greater extent so I don't know if it could be it.

Anyway, I know I should be going to the doctor, but right now that is not a possibility I can afford and even if I could, current restrictions wouldn't help. So I just wanted to know what you guys think it could be. Of course, I won't substitute any opinions for a real doctor's advice, but I just want to know your thoughts on it.",4.3270129504504515,4.735972281250003,5.333781906906907,84.54954391891893,70.1111111111111,8.171471471471474,27.19951201201201,8.098718942377014,1.5657271584084091,2198,67,460,28,37,725,242,576,0.086,0.858,0.055,-0.8745,3,1,0,0,0,0,60.0,2,4,4,2,30,22,2,5,35,1,61,17,5,3,3,94,110,43,0,14,20,0,4,4,0,4,11,0,5,1,34,28,1,6,15,2,4,23,15,13,0,6,33,6,60,9,66,61,7,100,0,2,2,0,18,26,0,10,55,339,94,9,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0543746351772551,0.0,0.0,0.05571938968709076,0.0,0.0,0.08899691181336741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11351940579502755,0.0583475453174816,0.08513495648415524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045790239140420144,0.0,0.0,0.12660607845512745,0.0522793335149771,0.21393385847764346,0.09292076720272656,0.033920042460863886,0.0,0.04734891286374481,0.0,0.0,0.04921256208679231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05716167629351535,0.0,0.047932345777826735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17770870186455706,0.1847069550988457,0.06112227886688425,0.03588575185640565,0.0,0.04792606250270097,0.0564774496247171,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28476976215087874,0.0,0.05694309178368372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05693766414310932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11025693533703763,0.0,0.046882437466806634,0.0,0.05000920465143782,0.0,0.1049123494299288,0.0,0.08440577654273447,0.039752057212666544,0.053426929176911865,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029071673263112476,0.0,0.4743561845272929,0.0,0.04450355918291436,0.0,0.0,0.05509627021460877,0.09841154277211088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07459394893605646,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05479809345346846,0.06420566066790767,0.05956801163985299,0.0,0.0,0.05807783904930289,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05794462317711895,0.15290233012112964,0.09071451064365747,0.06276881225059196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07860595118756633,0.1087393156122853,0.11153973522924332,0.04913463744774527,0.04924315491275663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0564142432943032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05607602559099746,0.0,0.11236907760611946,0.0,0.04441447919368699,0.0,0.0,0.04125929238900872,0.0429160534490035,0.0,0.0,0.05221808844094783,0.0,0.1067837635673654,0.06335101897165445,0.05838897727077469,0.05925900297337955,0.037705788388377584,0.1692789605299643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10623691499146526,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10520305866766017,0.06273020593063079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05565901954466125,0.12667002039741074,0.07129389316191835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04751963908621768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0886820661325326,0.0,0.0,0.06286183806928393,0.0,0.04602925996033223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05503330073435715,0.0,0.11815524703945733,0.0,0.0,0.09304168676869687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057835381689199876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06460692805763331,0.07393475101329347,0.07130880744700628,0.0,0.0883501798778764,0.1946786485597112,0.0,0.0,0.053170189781331686,0.0,0.03777859729187137,0.0,0.05435606500012955,0.0,0.0,0.048058516962114085,0.0,0.0,0.06564050035420699,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2579125489101914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040509466687238885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14333154738419251
mentalhealth,Toscaredtotell,2020/04/20,"Should I seek therapy? I not sure if I should post this here, but I need advice. My mother suggests I go back to therapy. I guess it's needed to tell you what I have diagnosis wise. I was professionally diagnosed with depression, anxiety, c-ptsd, and paranoia. I was in therapy, but I didn't always tell the truth out of fear of hospitalization. I struggle with my weight, a lot. My body as a whole. So, should I go back to therapy to sort this?",1.3818181818181827,3.821877181818184,3.9329090909090887,82.53936363636366,84.0,8.065454545454546,23.572727272727274,8.841846274778883,2.072950909090909,344,13,71,10,10,120,58,88,0.21100000000000002,0.71,0.08,-0.8908,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,4,6,0,2,3,0,7,3,1,0,2,18,12,6,0,6,4,1,1,0,0,3,1,0,0,0,4,4,1,0,0,0,0,2,2,3,0,0,3,1,16,3,11,6,2,7,0,1,0,0,5,2,0,4,2,52,20,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14523266774432386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12366623533456812,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11369618212779113,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2285638138904991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1650866395247827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12800876528289826,0.15084920845270108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16724218572018584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16893174281313927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16372498165968247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12635395304193126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.220404130836554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14233974320503642,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17373232437374134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15537302081355875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14007541113680716,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25980609177004865,0.0,0.6798533761766512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18098276506334907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16593226300328354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,nevergonnagetitmoby,2020/04/20,"I'm finally getting therapy and my 2nd session is today I've been trying to get help for a long time and I'm finally getting it. My first session was last week and my second is today. Something I'm proud about 






Also this account is very new. I just made it so...",0.05402597402597209,2.349350454545455,2.9215584415584424,88.1109090909091,89.9090909090909,5.324675324675325,24.22077922077921,6.868970318607317,1.1788961038961037,205,9,41,3,7,72,38,55,0.0,0.89,0.11,0.7003,0,0,1,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,2,4,1,0,0,1,0,5,0,0,1,0,5,12,5,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,4,1,3,9,0,10,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,10,24,7,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17897786886058994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4903378655614768,0.0,0.19036957934296084,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35078876460936304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15001268851292632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1824320581345664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19806158983896985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2117709935356628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21615358149479627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17229707360964888,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2559420827652252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13050329096416804,0.0,0.4242845291779903,0.0,0.0,0.1519498304844777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18466368964099536,0.0,0.0,0.1795239658391412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,sameer-qumsiyeh,2020/04/20,"How did I manage my depression, boredom and the feelings of being stuck during Quarantine I've been battling with depression for many years and the main reason for me suffering this was the horrible feeling of being stuck, especially because I live in Palestine under many different obstacles and challenges and Walls!

But in the last year - year and a half, I decided to take a path of courage and face my demons. Though I am still fighting, I started to feel more empowered and that I have more energy for compassion. The feeling of being locked and helpless is vanishing everyday.

I made a video to share my thoughts and my experience with this issue especially that now lots of people are forced to stay home during the Coronavirus quarantine.

I hope that this can be helpful to anyone having the same feelings and needing some encouraging thoughts.

[https://youtu.be/D46jWf\_URzE](https://youtu.be/D46jWf_URzE)  


Take care!",12.894649859943971,12.052632601307193,10.287226890756301,60.23823529411766,53.05228758169935,13.971615312791787,45.386554621848745,12.785403640627713,6.0738280112044825,760,36,107,20,7,225,95,153,0.19,0.657,0.154,-0.8140000000000001,2,2,0,0,2,0,27.0,0,0,0,1,4,12,2,0,10,0,13,1,1,3,0,29,29,13,0,2,1,0,5,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,6,12,0,0,9,1,0,0,0,6,0,1,8,5,13,6,18,17,6,13,1,4,0,0,4,4,0,3,8,82,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1136464554178098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09907826188515614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16571264649130846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2799778907851069,0.0,0.0,0.16981179802005386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589879058792035,0.0,0.0,0.410906405486264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10894206303340724,0.0,0.16303328123147925,0.1614313780598399,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16964163160143134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13248562487364254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14351911505702525,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381792613453423,0.0,0.1537921168876424,0.0,0.32956475084692644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1205157387768884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11267952350410528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1671104096815956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11504129181429612,0.17323794672547105,0.1297986100282738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2444083226831529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1596872890718251,0.25806519168248565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3139966718317166
mentalhealth,Redblood294,2020/04/20,"What are your opinions on Mental Health in the UK? I want to create a debate and collect everyone's opinions about Mental Health in the UK. 

Could you please answer the following questions and feel free to create additional questions for further debate.

* Do you think Mental Health is an over looked area or the opposite? 
* Are the current documentaries about Mental Health good enough or do they need to be changed? 
* Is there enough information out there about Mental Health? 
* Is Mental health important? 
* Are people over exaggerating when they say they are mentally ill? 
* Do you think the government has to improve the treatment people get who suffer from Mental Health conditions? If so which area or areas?    

I would like as many people sharing their opinions on the Mental Health topic and commenting whatever you think and feel. 

Thank you.       

\#mentalhealth",5.173295019157088,8.709026379310345,4.5599425287356325,76.71792145593874,78.3103448275862,7.084291187739464,25.986590038314176,8.167268648758528,2.3880957854406133,695,26,101,14,18,209,83,145,0.049,0.782,0.16899999999999998,0.9474,1,0,0,0,0,0,20.0,0,6,4,0,7,6,0,0,10,0,14,9,0,0,0,26,25,11,0,5,4,0,2,1,0,1,9,1,0,0,3,6,0,0,9,0,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,4,12,6,17,22,2,14,0,1,1,0,17,11,0,9,3,70,15,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07828257567202987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059083271195788614,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15292432030502087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07071052141895176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07483361754213398,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.038662137250407916,0.0,0.0,0.06206799650726904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6292714335191093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03615284117522703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06214167040214299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07502475682711156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6711746793558919,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05487033411394989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.153907609874519,0.0,0.0,0.08123018053797777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16579469254746193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058848061608150565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06812959522212954,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14224934057255745,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0436473334525929,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052567737196405104,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,snoooopy12345,2020/04/20,"Are premonitions of bad events real? I have had a few dreams that appear to predict bad things. A week before my grandma got sick and died I had a dream about her dying. Never had I had one like it before and at the time of the dream she was ok. 

Then another dream was about a really bad car crash that really shook me and put me in a bad mood that next morning. Later in the day whilst at work there was an announcement that a really bad crash had happened close by and people had died. 

When this happened I was really scared because it instantly made me think of the previous nights dream. 

Could this be possible that I have dreams that predict bad things?",3.9462307692307697,5.487885007692313,4.547692307692311,85.61230769230772,72.0,8.276923076923078,23.0,8.841846274778883,1.4429076923076924,521,13,105,10,10,166,74,130,0.26899999999999996,0.617,0.114,-0.981,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,1,4,11,0,2,11,1,15,1,0,1,1,11,21,6,3,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,12,5,0,0,1,6,0,4,1,8,0,1,12,0,11,2,11,7,1,20,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,1,12,70,23,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13159284308235913,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6287003782798686,0.07650081594027339,0.0,0.21357464231600687,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10019784547742544,0.0,0.0,0.08093413505636557,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3907331590033991,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1003701158000404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2219502917395775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06131070132595341,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11874675840320935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09678976992947833,0.0,0.13346575528160867,0.11776890837276766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08503891410838485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08700269184997403,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1414771795563493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1261575141713096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14284121145711265,0.3215822034856336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12564276346034414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166747101964384,0.08041236917256042,0.0,0.0,0.07317736250945096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10066482025309344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09136212781734154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,redrocket2367,2020/04/20,Can abandonment cause trauma? For more background: like if a parent leaves you when you’re at a young age.,3.5875000000000017,6.229834750000002,3.0599999999999987,90.935,76.5,6.0,20.0,7.1686216300943375,0.4455,85,2,16,1,2,25,18,20,0.27,0.609,0.121,-0.5302,1,0,0,0,0,0,3.0,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,3,1,2,0,1,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,2,1,1,4,0,1,0,0,2,1,0,1,4,9,1,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5378406956489188,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5543748092083827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2557851385121712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5813518039323229,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thelegend27890,2020/04/20,"Can't function until I'm recognise by this person I like and other people I think that I've maybe liked this girl for more than 2 years. But I've never really thought about her sexually nor romantically like imagining a relationship with her, stuff like that. And I'm definitely not asexual. See we've been texting for quite a while and I just can't but feel so inferior to her and that I don't deserve her and stuff like that. But I can't seem to stop myself from texting her even though I feel like I'm doing it too much like multiple times a day. At this point it feels like I can't even function or just exist until and unless I'm texting with her. Yet at times it feels like I like her because I want to be her and I've absolutely no idea what to do anymore. I'm such a boring and average person that I don't think I can even function until and unless I'm recognised by somebody. I don't even know whether I even like the things that I do in my free time cause it seems like just escapism and a way to pass time until I'm with someone else. And it's not just her, I think I've suffered like this my whole life, that the only reason I should exist is for others not for myself. This lockdown is breaking me and I'm just at a loss as to what to do.",3.095641632170313,3.9394726741573054,4.607380248373744,87.05921939680664,73.19475655430713,7.2689927064853155,24.914054799921153,7.475848149327749,0.9983827715355806,992,29,219,11,19,333,118,267,0.075,0.7509999999999999,0.175,0.9707,0,1,0,0,0,0,14.0,0,0,0,2,16,18,0,0,8,0,17,1,0,2,1,49,38,28,0,2,15,0,4,13,0,1,1,0,0,3,24,15,0,1,14,0,1,1,13,4,0,0,2,5,30,15,30,34,3,22,0,3,1,0,13,5,0,3,27,151,54,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09875664161098388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06070306804537597,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10229613154631187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06422088767466094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0831863454922803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3288583859115624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20140264084507944,0.2134200011726093,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11241374410604027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05472658567776501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033632710241625,0.6324471075741449,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10004153453154407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07320278714170796,0.0,0.07680226567403604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573510758098878,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06903626135992004,0.17389889969276015,0.0,0.0,0.09413532480469086,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10591562996708057,0.0,0.0,0.06379352344297558,0.10238486603399263,0.0,0.10691169604688854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07935239911711119,0.1813078566931092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08437384464510866,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08325337224287367,0.0,0.0,0.2279906427050111,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06615655370797523,0.1914206060775664,0.09783688359152473,0.07905542847028837,0.2322636882336224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058734887554036275,0.07904200059137688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11117755832335044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06412628082608005
mentalhealth,mousio,2020/04/20,"I've made it; now what? Trying to answer What the title says, in a broad sense.


Basically if I'm someone who has been struggling with mental issues for a long time (a few months to years) and have managed to reach a point in my life that i can and want to continue living, what help/support is available for someone like me? What can i look forward to?


This is a part that's often overlooked (I think), so if it would be good to mention any program or support given (public or private) in the comments. 

Or if this has been asked before I'd appreciate it if you redirect me there😅.",6.556153846153848,5.4474765384615385,7.143205128205127,78.58096153846154,65.66666666666667,9.167521367521367,34.029914529914535,7.793537801064563,2.41608376068376,453,17,90,4,6,150,79,117,0.034,0.846,0.12,0.8334,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,1,0,0,3,4,0,1,7,0,11,1,0,1,0,16,19,10,0,6,7,0,0,1,0,1,1,1,0,0,12,3,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,1,0,0,4,2,7,3,12,13,2,12,0,0,1,0,7,6,0,8,8,63,19,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13838150949911054,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.190237511365854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17315666839529562,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17067939978764218,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1363963700432338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2123927353161223,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14373238793096246,0.09941589191916403,0.0,0.17968712708875922,0.1800839793408509,0.17088199398859458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19254901092066348,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20507203187808312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16242533947552945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22036196040334305,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19236567475486185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16182497259709386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.344836151370233,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21273397737718824,0.0,0.0,0.4618405249744089,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13038943006249926,0.0,0.0,0.118657797168102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1381576819415619,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12002482914278005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1445548485172413,0.0,0.0,0.1310421492274274
mentalhealth,errorunknown606,2020/04/20,"I don't know what to do anymore For the majority of my life I didn't really know what I wanted to do but I always was positive about it. I sued to say it's fine I'll figure something out or I'll have a plan by then but now that I'm 19 I just don't know. I'm in university but I had to travel daily which made me hate it and now that we have to stay home I just don't have the mental strength too do anything let alone get up and have food. My mental health has never been great but now more than ever its at its worst. Being at home make me feel like I'm being suffocated. My home life isn't the worst, my parents are just very religious and want me to travel to university. I just wanted to have a normal uni experience, living away, making friends, going out but I've not done any of that.
Being at home has made my mental health horrendous and I haven't been able to help it. I don't even know if I want to continue uni as I just keep falling behind.
I feel like there isn't much I can do at this point. I feel like I'm rolling down an endless rocky hill where each tumble breaks a bone until there's nothing left of me.",1.0749573283858993,2.6858432285714287,3.1539981447124315,92.28506029684604,79.9795918367347,6.0871985157699475,18.891465677179962,6.980632752743323,0.0331632653061229,881,19,206,10,22,299,126,245,0.11900000000000001,0.753,0.128,-0.2143,1,1,1,0,0,0,15.0,1,0,0,2,15,10,1,0,7,0,30,6,1,4,2,41,53,14,0,6,13,1,3,3,1,0,4,1,4,0,13,8,1,1,8,2,0,4,10,3,0,0,8,4,26,7,30,41,6,27,0,0,0,0,5,13,0,2,11,139,39,0,0.10958366760712517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11349563093600536,0.0,0.0,0.09118239001370998,0.0,0.0,0.07452065175692656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1086775522563862,0.0,0.0,0.09017802130706112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10295746299064427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11214213859883876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0723789789463226,0.099124701134015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1071938543769687,0.0,0.0,0.16622638488888902,0.23485978210314698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13250900585072653,0.0,0.08466406975922416,0.0,0.05725294342563725,0.0,0.06227892365774024,0.0,0.0,0.12081638040118672,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1081911845852572,0.0,0.232964628606112,0.0,0.0,0.073451622472481,0.0,0.4396854140642542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0974029988345966,0.0,0.0,0.2408972714255365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11906297549262553,0.11205672464891832,0.1548043704099581,0.1606111341239536,0.0,0.09676438616295116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20738143182419375,0.14629589811776114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3313036877828724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08055660454963526,0.0,0.08451768007743367,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736872743930173,0.10514848455689564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12167969452498605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10359198646033987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0702021035193028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08714533084754161,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08436286109757109,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168016090982696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09041800230596507,0.2585411454784343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,angelnike,2020/04/20,"Does anybody know what MIGHT be wrong with me? I’m a 14 year old girl, and i’m not sure how long this all has been going on, it’s a blur, i just know it’s been getting worse. My vision is constantly fucked up like i’m on acid or something . some times it’s much more intense than other times. I frequently zone out very intensely and everything in my vision becomes extra fucked, like crosshatches, blurriness, lines, etc , and it especially happens in stressful situations i’ll totally freeze and almost leave my physical state and be in my mental state . I feel very weird a lot and a lot of times i feel like i’m on the verge of tripping or becoming high or some type of drug for some reason, even though i don’t/have never taken psychs/drugs and i don’t usually smoke weed. Just earlier tonight I had a very intense “attack” . I walked into my room and turned on the light, immediately felt a little light headed and zoned out on a poster for a good 20 or 30 seconds. I snapped out of it and walked to my couch and everything in the room sort of looked/felt like it was getting bigger and smaller/just moving and I felt very unbalanced and like my body was moving and like, changing shape in a way?? i’m not sure how to describe it well. I sat down and was very anxious and scared. My ears were ringing insanely loud ,my ears ringing is normal(tinnitus) , but it’s was still very intense like a gong was being played in my ear, and my ears felt pressured. The carpet looked very like? cross hatch-ey? I felt like my body was still moving around, and even closing my eyes didnt help because Jt made me feel really paranoid to do so. I just I really hate this all I feel like reality isn’t a real thing anymore I literally have existential crises every single day and i literally feel like i’m not living somewhere normal and i’m not alive and nothing is real",3.5177355072463747,5.274637766304347,4.424978260869565,85.18596376811594,73.51086956521739,7.406666666666666,25.58188405797101,8.131152278815165,1.5087855797101457,1470,49,293,23,30,475,185,368,0.11199999999999999,0.768,0.12,-0.5898,0,0,4,0,0,0,38.0,0,0,0,0,13,25,4,3,15,0,23,11,8,4,6,74,53,31,0,1,12,0,10,11,0,1,1,7,4,1,13,29,0,0,12,1,0,8,8,9,1,1,18,22,32,16,30,31,13,51,0,0,2,2,2,26,2,13,25,171,45,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07165421672029675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08083928761151245,0.0709655315765718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06370109441959088,0.0,0.08140666502878433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043620615503897335,0.15805864911423145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15896787402956372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0756980477686886,0.0,0.0,0.07732793074812577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04614848538596652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0626202030861428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1659673083401803,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07980521260008774,0.09452573432603148,0.0,0.06029004182363864,0.0,0.12862202576974754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18090739563619876,0.15336147103854428,0.3435307514530558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1323069886963732,0.07477138526157756,0.0,0.04066761563567106,0.060018798872924425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06327781094850471,0.0,0.0,0.07064793756008254,0.07343834922078396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04796329440346757,0.07560412885498577,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07865195050459156,0.0,0.0,0.07576876108788752,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3845516607289352,0.0717191305030787,0.06318633387633166,0.0633258855476534,0.06009004039717933,0.0,0.0,0.12167077449833125,0.0,0.06770916920264777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0721128446143257,0.0759108994757583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281619926347975,0.05260278820396985,0.0,0.05518933735426732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14022175986177232,0.06866107992060125,0.0,0.07508726235036077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16289555834139613,0.09168277147589314,0.0735727372354293,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07164125778775593,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08043331038963565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05508824185684416,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429137236069956,0.0,0.08196855066538665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13488366094515192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047539435571878716,0.0,0.07030460269413932,0.0,0.12517676658924268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07783370426427319,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07881016534270288,0.413295388528611,0.0,0.056798788388718276,0.0,0.0,0.0643385320406684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07292291774600157,0.0,0.0782365838915485,0.0,0.04608050185401558
mentalhealth,claysun9,2020/04/20,"Mixed experience with Better Help  I thought some counselling would be beneficial for some personal problems. I’m an emotional person. I find myself crying easily and often. I don’t think I need a psychologist so I subscribed to Better Help. Wasn’t sure how I’d go finding a face to face counsellor with this social isolation anyway.

As many may know, with Better Help you pay by the week but you have to pay for a month in advance.

My first session went well. My second session went well even if what we spoke about was not completely related to the original thing I wanted to speak about. But hey, it all forms part of a bigger picture, right? 

My third session again was off topic. I had a rough week being unsuccessful in a job I really wanted and wanted to talk through that. I got a lot of one word answers and cliche responses. Perhaps I’m being too harsh as cliches and one word answers aren’t necessarily untruthful. And I can be shy. But perhaps my counsellor is bored because what I wanted to talk about doesn’t necessarily fall under her speciality?

Each session is supposed to go for an hour. But I don’t know if it was me struggling to form words or my counsellor but it just felt like maybe she was distracted.

There was about 10 minutes left of our session and she said, ‘That’s all we have time for today - is there anything you want to add?’ There was more I wanted to say but I just said nope. I feel uncomfortable putting people out when they don’t want to help.

My fourth session is booked for this weekend but instead of an hour its only half an hour. Why so short? Perhaps my counsellor believes our therapeutic relationship should come to an end and this will be our wrap-up session. After the session, I guess I do too, now.

Not sure if my expectations are too high, if Better Help isn't suitable for me, or perhaps there's something I'm missing and there's another path I need to follow here.",3.9378500435919785,5.938891254054058,4.8513251961639074,81.53940278988668,72.94594594594595,7.6931124673060145,28.15170008718396,8.460557738077197,2.1170993897122936,1524,60,285,27,31,495,194,370,0.081,0.787,0.133,0.9396,2,1,1,0,0,0,35.0,5,3,1,6,27,15,0,2,15,0,32,2,2,2,4,71,62,27,0,17,17,0,3,1,0,4,0,5,0,2,12,16,0,0,10,2,2,9,10,5,2,6,16,8,41,10,41,37,10,35,0,1,0,0,29,10,0,12,17,204,53,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09741019507600183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0764459944797147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05662891103850865,0.0,0.0,0.10466266752265824,0.0,0.3286380084701189,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08002220362935407,0.09740032783942824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10204256366769747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10449618237167624,0.08227882302041828,0.0,0.0,0.06135733457864985,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09087070974931052,0.0,0.0,0.04697131709558418,0.0,0.08919531344663856,0.0,0.16981163660527046,0.07901780875532748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10559056819246022,0.0,0.0742979050446058,0.0,0.1023360888419212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3113331965301006,0.09815036852679003,0.0,0.0,0.2744533438750875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09218555094611296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10210709447077276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10093243825183557,0.0,0.0,0.04538459111085374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07897737555350225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0941825815372672,0.0933271305975489,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07414918757790191,0.0,0.0,0.13776331800909458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12589829383296625,0.07065205775908706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10059797559754133,0.0,0.06440281239260927,0.16222747280309824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0888895095225774,0.0,0.09338675096516827,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059511946928034465,0.0,0.0,0.09973619323309492,0.0,0.07933319710611365,0.176731897870244,0.0738751126310468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09469639484414792,0.0,0.07151634866546881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09711570647577897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17510791051375504,0.0,0.0,0.14933355203309354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061716379668698265,0.05952439649563776,0.0,0.07374953145051395,0.05416876017133873,0.0,0.08805512388098435,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3835497908882688,0.0,0.14903211372988448,0.0,0.16705041711086005,0.17223217576807553,0.08382474111173331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599108619757546,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ironflower19,2020/04/20,"How many different media (reading books, watching movies etc) are you able to juggle at once? Hi reddit, I’m currently recovering from a years-long bout of clinical depression; over the last few years I completely withdrew from all of my hobbies and interests, and as a result my capacity to focus on them diminished. 

My therapist explained that if you spend enough time essentially doing nothing (which is what depression has involved for me), the pathways in your brain that pertain to your interests - e.g gaming - can literally diminish, meaning you have to rebuild them by practicing doing those things again. In other words, you literally have to teach yourself how to enjoy things again.

Currently I’m undertaking this process by playing an hour or two of PS4 a day, as well as watching an episode of an anime and reading a single issue of a comic book daily. My therapist says that because of neuroplasticity, the more I engage in this practice the greater my capacity will become (I can’t get through a novel right now for example, but I’m getting there). My question is: how many different media is it ‘normal’ to consume on a regular basis? 

For example, Are there people who play three different video games at once and somehow follow the story, while also reading a novel and watching a tv series or two at the same time? How many different media properties are you able to enjoy simultaneously? 

**Tl;dr - I forgot how to have fun thanks to depression and I’m trying to learn how again, please help**",8.687893432465927,8.95403171747212,8.906602230483273,63.14790830235442,60.82156133828997,11.782998760842625,39.494671623296156,11.34169021259432,4.925312069392811,1208,58,183,31,15,399,156,269,0.035,0.8370000000000001,0.128,0.9687,6,0,0,0,0,0,39.0,0,7,2,0,15,13,0,0,18,0,15,2,1,7,1,27,26,21,0,2,4,0,0,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,13,6,0,1,4,14,1,1,1,3,1,3,1,4,20,10,37,24,8,24,0,3,3,0,18,10,0,5,13,140,33,7,0.2162674851146226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08647451485543671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06591732580182509,0.11942522301786718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12071301866975008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337617174079515,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06973731826814157,0.0,0.2794063020440613,0.0,0.0,0.4519069835139535,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11173106203312023,0.12059770681534494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11299083486111808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07247976827469911,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10648995453524984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11286353320152527,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0881434326025724,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0956949593927853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32889192807330897,0.0,0.1177893461378017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1059481087387212,0.1037572423669044,0.0,0.0,0.23031781343991264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07496632178129989,0.0,0.0,0.11869837737447662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12113453923374652,0.0,0.3244890152512632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09234562531121243,0.0,0.0859922922521994,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09955502192027993,0.0,0.25110321903303584,0.14367850736752769,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12610730974738155,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07341571311113299,0.0,0.21126190806233253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09722522089943876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06963458490289669
mentalhealth,violetmonstermunch,2020/04/20,"Tools to improve emotional and mental state? My job forced me to take my holidays during quarantine. I've taken all my 6 days of holidays and i'll return to work tomorrow.

* I dread going back. I hate my boss, my colleagues and my job is uninteresting and shit. 
* Plus my dad left my abusive mother and I'm left alone to suffer her abuse. 
* I don't have any friends, I can't go out anymore.

I feel really bad right now. What are good things I can do to improve my emotional and mental state ? 

On the bright side I won't actually GO back to work  because I work from home. 

Sorry if it's not the right subreddit.",0.5644817073170749,3.0093821300813026,2.8536534552845545,88.29560213414636,89.48780487804878,6.327032520325204,20.695630081300813,7.645422480735847,1.0653093495934964,474,16,98,10,16,161,79,123,0.24600000000000002,0.614,0.14,-0.9532,2,2,0,0,1,0,16.0,0,0,0,3,3,8,2,1,2,0,8,1,1,1,1,13,16,8,0,1,2,2,1,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,3,8,0,0,1,2,0,3,4,5,0,0,1,2,19,3,11,14,1,18,0,1,1,0,4,7,1,1,6,55,22,6,0.0,0.3400001678272257,0.14001557350951674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14860178661238704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09757117431985413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1422933931180669,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22065419725115026,0.11979962779723625,0.08746394555293135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09253259190686554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32279089383267,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07254769066994657,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11085212641524876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2446286058990668,0.12034403678473493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14165658353972266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14392192355447647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2847630957704585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3117824136784122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2891877540999325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09191682464674192,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2450619058350105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1472799380288308,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16061387308380612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10787894246984787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09532159407756152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3133649781953172,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,AwkwardAutisticKido,2020/04/20,Idk wtf is going on with me I keep absorbing what I hear anywhere I just cant help stopping it....whenever I hear someone saying anything I just take it for granted and accept it as a fact without even trying to know wtf that ever means...Even whats said in movies,2.112222222222222,4.107948,3.699777777777779,87.77300000000002,78.25925925925927,5.801481481481483,25.61481481481481,6.742157984588678,1.0861303703703706,208,8,41,2,5,69,43,54,0.207,0.6809999999999999,0.111,-0.7363,0,0,0,0,0,0,7.0,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,0,1,0,2,0,0,0,2,11,9,2,0,0,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,0,0,5,2,0,2,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,0,1,4,6,1,7,8,0,5,0,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,2,26,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21180223375673413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3399948057334983,0.2328154112981088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14627527811637214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5801730929208593,0.0,0.1725167339806074,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2287716278174397,0.0,0.0,0.14144960006412266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24482780948658786,0.20467931617317134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2180776752855604,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21518163543187332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19351811601936586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17474447491040215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24810563199397764,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,-throwaway-account-1,2020/04/20,"What's happening to me? I've been feeling severely suicidally depressed everyday for a year now, not being able to keep up with classes, work, relationships, or even taking care of myself this whole time and it's getting progressively worse. What I find very strange is that I have these sudden, complete mental shifts.

Nearly every day i'll feel absolutely hopeless, suicidal, worthless, and self-loathing. Yet.. a few random days i'll get hit with a fat brick of realization over how overdramatic i'm being. I'll feel genuinely hopeful, and think having a good future could be possible during these rare moments. Then the next day I feel like I should die again. Is this a symptom of something? I feel like i'm missing something here and it's getting exhausting going through this cycle. These two moods are just so drastically different that it's confusing me.",6.2385268817204285,8.38686463225807,6.348145161290326,72.55555107526884,67.19354838709678,9.295698924731182,34.206989247311824,9.725611199111238,3.701698924731183,698,33,111,16,12,222,110,155,0.20199999999999999,0.703,0.096,-0.9564,1,0,2,0,0,1,22.0,0,0,0,2,8,12,0,1,6,0,11,3,1,1,0,23,30,8,3,3,3,0,5,2,0,1,3,0,0,0,13,6,1,1,7,0,0,1,1,6,0,1,1,5,8,5,12,23,2,18,0,4,0,0,1,3,0,4,16,68,21,2,0.1425760653001105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14536580077010214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14948829184400772,0.0,0.0,0.11383538662211587,0.0,0.0,0.2758493012849356,0.0,0.12280055612423015,0.0,0.14797144592380074,0.1489616424700011,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09417014646382613,0.0,0.12012648427061663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.36045371273584703,0.20371273907688764,0.0,0.0,0.1303119407010934,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2234703285276729,0.0,0.081029263576767,0.11958603909813187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12607954368020116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14161020319182782,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12672815781322758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1393109274207981,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14368313957406714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1516312629368626,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16073309117841272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15307333652940572,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14873793079245354,0.16107037112561295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21952404140869208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31191014881304285,0.0,0.0,0.1481911232472019,0.10719945729542583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09135698567511684,0.0,0.0,0.08313725024283945,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13927609868564791,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11764018564608268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15918108522274388,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10379707361122263,0.0,0.14529719115484008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09181431151335108
mentalhealth,xfionaxfionax,2020/04/20,"Anyone who studies/studied psychology, tell me stuff about myself that will help me understand myself a bit more. Psychiatrist of reddit! Tell me more about myself 🧐

So my whole live I’ve been to psychiatrists. I’ve always had a really rough time, mentally, down below is a list of everything I’ve been diagnosed with since I was a kid. Everything that has a star has been diagnosed since I was a kid and everything else was age 13 and up. I’m sure some of these can be combined as one disorder but I’m not sure. I don’t really understand myself much and wanted to see if anyone on here could help me! ❤️

*ADHD •
Bipolar disorder •
*pure O OCD •
*ODD •
Panic disorder •
PTSD•
*Social anxiety/generalized anxiety disorder •
*Major depressive disorder •
Binge eating disorder•
*Cluster b personality disorder/BPD•
Paranoia•
Psychosis •
Schizotypal personality disorder•
*Depersonalization disorder•
*Dissociative identity disorder•
*insomnia •
*somatic symptom disorder •
Avoidant personality disorder•
*Selective eating disorder •
*Dysthymia •
*selective mutism •
*Reactive Attachment Disorder•
*Dependent personality disorder•",4.502934176672387,5.5906676875000025,6.6232761578044625,53.4917066895369,127.8068181818182,12.010120068610634,34.57075471698113,8.508773641640916,6.986991552315607,907,55,103,47,53,312,112,176,0.18100000000000002,0.75,0.069,-0.9714,0,1,0,0,0,0,28.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,2,6,0,15,7,0,1,3,17,21,7,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,1,5,0,0,6,5,4,2,1,2,0,0,0,2,3,0,1,7,2,12,2,13,11,7,6,0,1,1,0,12,4,0,3,2,65,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.105272168752279,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0728860578095943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06700993590430694,0.0,0.0,0.12249692258122136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563105403917699,0.0,0.11032283718215248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06993748052128179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07544544589153594,0.17781416403708966,0.0,0.0,0.7027402190706239,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17926310800338782,0.07317438327839731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2361742158598674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1174261653139996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07734799057934681,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08827515830868758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06439240444636869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05935663956313383,0.0,0.0,0.10277386011879047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3059383042374539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10239386849160548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11223120110568904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06980187472708126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14491897979597115,0.0,0.0,0.08929207228415165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1002753190710416,0.0,0.0,0.16511450334360048,0.09104474542641487,0.0,0.0,0.1531237833253854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05107734942520847,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1823789702099272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05166580101888793,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09779669026888768,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,mango0o0,2020/04/20,"Cyberstalking Staying at home has given me a lot of time to browse on the internet and I can’t help myself but cyberstalk my bf’s ex and girls that he used to like. Looking at their Insta and other social media accounts makes me feel anxious and self conscious about my weight, appearance and body. I wasn’t always like this but I found myself struggling in my own skin.",5.2641666666666636,6.480573750000001,5.759333333333338,79.419,68.44444444444444,8.537777777777778,28.288888888888888,8.841846274778883,2.2253188888888893,298,10,54,5,5,96,57,72,0.083,0.805,0.11199999999999999,0.2846,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,1,2,0,3,3,2,2,0,14,10,7,0,0,2,1,3,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,3,5,1,0,3,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,3,4,11,2,8,7,2,7,0,0,1,0,8,4,0,2,3,36,14,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20887550852153206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2835903276828141,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.278835655403921,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1269273619907751,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2752393809569009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16825885999878087,0.0,0.2518016758454201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24527932282623605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21080040102039188,0.0,0.0,0.2134151340819688,0.0,0.0,0.16756322196296358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26187708041847424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25589155959040594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2675625797137582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.262429099140588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14637651775588306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21680770069457286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3056846275296379,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ismakinmethirsty,2020/04/20,"Looking for extra ideas! Hey all, I hope you and your loved ones are staying safe amid the current crisis. During this extra time I have been given I’m really hoping to iron out the things that are holding me back in life. I have been diagnosed with mixed anxiety/depression and PTSD. I undergo psychology sessions once a fortnight, take my meds regularly, exercise, I limit or completely stop my alcohol intake, do art therapy with my boyfriend, I’m learning to play guitar and the drums with the help of my boyfriend and his band. Overall these factors have helped improve my mood. I have zero self-harm, suicidal thoughts or tendencies now. But I still struggle immensely with anger outbursts, temper tantrums and sensory overload. I still find I am quite irritable and sometimes hard to be around. Which is hard for my family when we’re locked up the in house. 
So in order to try and combat the anger in extra ways I am going to implement meditation, mindfulness and gratitude into my morning routine in order to calm myself right at the beginning of the day and hopefully carry that energy throughout the rest of the day. Does anyone have any other useful helpful suggests that could help alleviate excess anger and irritability. There isn’t much I can do about my sensory overload though, but if you have any tips for that too, please let me know!!
Sending positive vibes to everyone at the moment! 💕✌️",6.526540798611113,8.141774683593752,6.826979166666668,71.44788194444446,65.8359375,10.22013888888889,34.14409722222222,10.380263240014207,3.954049305555555,1133,51,182,29,18,366,169,256,0.114,0.754,0.132,0.7858,1,0,1,0,0,0,28.0,0,3,0,2,11,14,5,1,12,0,20,5,0,1,1,38,34,18,1,5,5,0,2,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,9,17,1,4,5,6,0,2,1,6,0,2,4,3,26,7,29,27,6,30,0,0,1,1,13,12,0,6,12,128,35,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345681072056032,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.171257191310852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08804483214757179,0.0,0.0,0.1120937655747578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09682321222327787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13202268550252094,0.0,0.0,0.10053532127286742,0.0,0.0,0.162413457715846,0.0,0.10845303669428334,0.12780417578021955,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11019173891654624,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12032009813182115,0.0,0.0,0.1187043363072682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1150868215308545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07156213272447799,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22559568980614544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33760087345701323,0.0,0.0,0.3751951224270851,0.0,0.14529252996748615,0.0,0.14214615786329285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06920127026222421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12875974296000134,0.08893964644032387,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10573945334897758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11364596125961313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13986657346900566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.127141340854284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0925642591110808,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13409861958879646,0.08532533319300194,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1382202124587292,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14719146855801868,0.0,0.0,0.1339293515861267,0.0,0.0,0.0806663306706251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10753333139408693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13135999359601327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12453617660775695,0.0,0.0,0.13421189323467272,0.2011166435576586,0.10527313263691147,0.0,0.1316368913515781,0.0,0.13773391539171412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.094674707042097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14399827033381532,0.0,0.08365436096670288,0.0,0.12371385020976465,0.09996487088525016,0.07342383076935767,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08549009420757178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10875277106837766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0999478914543923,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,pankaj11,2020/04/20,"How to take care of your mental health during this pandemic - Mental Health Issues During Lockdown How to take care of your mental health during this pandemic 

Mental Health Issues During Lockdown

Online Support for Mental Health Issues. Click on the following link to know more:

[https://www.trickyhealth.com/2020/04/mental-health-issues-during-lockdown.html](https://www.trickyhealth.com/2020/04/mental-health-issues-during-lockdown.html)",29.102340425531914,31.355106148936173,15.668617021276601,24.58250000000004,19.425531914893625,12.804255319148936,38.393617021276604,11.20814326018867,4.7542,387,7,27,4,2,88,24,47,0.0,0.8290000000000001,0.171,0.8442,0,4,0,0,0,0,33.0,0,2,0,0,2,3,0,0,1,0,0,5,0,2,0,4,7,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,5,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,2,3,7,7,1,2,0,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,0,15,4,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1839064474534302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6710633783566741,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2824002012090773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04956526103400427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6362218256503346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10234488245337736,0.0,0.0,0.13562111071307942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,The_normalperson,2020/04/20,I get seriously anxious whenever something about my school or anything related to it comes up Over the past month I've been trying to avoid anything related to my school because of a few things happening first I wasn't able to help my friends out for our class project and now they got mad at me when I tried to talk to them (via social media) second I wasn't able to comply to the projects our teachers had given us and now that they've probably recorded the grades I wouldn't be able to pass my work this.This is a big problem for me I don't want to spend my break having to worry about this so if anyone has any suggestions please just tell me. Also it's a huge relief to finally get this off my chest and also thank you in advance.,5.299816041206772,5.332089165562916,5.722869757174398,83.91548933039002,67.94039735099338,8.830316409124356,30.02281089036056,8.515128840125781,2.031304047093452,588,20,122,8,9,189,100,151,0.11900000000000001,0.794,0.087,-0.4367,0,1,1,0,0,0,5.0,3,1,2,3,9,7,1,1,6,0,10,1,1,0,0,12,18,9,0,4,3,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,6,5,0,1,0,0,1,3,4,4,0,2,6,0,21,3,23,10,1,19,0,0,0,0,12,8,0,2,7,81,27,7,0.465407762836497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2481242798621021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549774608034684,0.0,0.0,0.1752594329841273,0.0,0.10847464301492027,0.0,0.25532728900203616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09456941748881707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13363585922133273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16994381841188586,0.0,0.1319585351050195,0.0,0.0,0.11985762769120173,0.0,0.1621042313900302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12407636791620098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13718618254785794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10398433768490284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1238280120156781,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14809479053782962,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1702926547554397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1672627615964858,0.14844412478107555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3140116686167621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15814153467673558,0.0,0.11943121119919455,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1246923768117503,0.13559563279887232,0.14282831283830102,0.0,0.0,0.1030654124854804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21065421386538485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18660941151529886,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09150318560676927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11294079810822424,0.15754805819696055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,throwsomeadviceatmee,2020/04/20,"Something Wired In My Brain, Help? Throwaway account just because...
I need advice because eventually I have to discuss this with my behavioral therapist. 

This might sound crazy, but sometimes I run around my house in a repetitional pattern. Through the hallway and around the kitchen table. I only run this way, I strictly run with music. 

Whenever I run, I get very imaginative. Almost like hallucinating. I think of surreal things that correspond with the song I’m listening too. 
My awareness with the “outside world” is 50/50. I’m often aloof though, which resulted in small injuries. 


Running makes me happy. I don’t feel a fight or flight symptoms. Though it’s a very embarrassing habit. I’m very dependent on it, and sometimes it’s a urge. 
I run 2-4 times a day ranging from 5 to 15 minutes. 

Is this link to a behavioral disorder? I’ve been doing this since I was 8 years old ten years ago. 
I tried mentioning this to a previous therapist but he didn’t believe me. 

What should I say to my newest therapist.",3.470294117647061,6.283552967914439,4.462917112299465,79.71908155080214,78.14438502673798,7.804171122994652,30.740374331550804,8.697196308434329,2.980565989304813,803,40,140,19,20,260,120,187,0.075,0.867,0.059000000000000004,-0.4105,0,0,1,0,1,0,30.0,0,0,0,0,7,4,1,1,11,0,10,3,1,3,0,24,19,7,0,2,4,0,1,1,0,2,1,5,1,0,13,8,1,0,4,1,1,6,2,2,0,1,3,6,20,2,18,14,0,23,0,0,0,0,7,8,0,5,9,83,33,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13539258979985372,0.12281905770621862,0.0,0.13874102230221733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2466834574730805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16892149730940784,0.0,0.0,0.1561020173803237,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15467120070781232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893553559470326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15879397829201547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0700566642451017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07238833180354702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14749246466491914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09286929371505312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15987179774724988,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06769009808441617,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09248534119648652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14698305667423872,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10273544699006996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14538828302358567,0.0,0.0,0.10537595696074734,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11018307089687432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146126441544742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666502743146176,0.2740653279739374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1440098325889881,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4826128550685781,0.0920485938274804,0.08877930016740443,0.2722556437511977,0.0,0.08079148890320717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0940685323161816,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3429627173896813,0.0,0.1099770861684112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1784474446320866
mentalhealth,pigeonion,2020/04/20,"I just need to vent, I'm struggling and very much alone So, I've been struggling for god knows how many years with my mental health, I've gotten into a really bad state before and I keep getting closer and closer to going back there.
I'm actually at work at the moment, about to start, and I can't stop shaking. The anxiety is making me feel nauseous to the point where I feel like I might pass out. I slept horribly and I was plagued with nightmares all night, just like I have been since about a week before the UK went into lockdown.
At the moment, I've never felt so alone. I truly have no one. Back in September one of my friends randomly cut me off because I was ""mean"" to her, and blocked me on everything without a word. I admit, I was mean, but she didn't give me the chance to redeem myself. Let's call her friend A... Back in highschool and until September, me, friend A and friend B were best friends. We were a trio that people knew, and even stuck together within our larger friend groups. I was part of a friendship group of about 9 people and we all did cosplay and hung out together. One of the girls, lets call her C, got on really well with me, but suddenly she started inviting friends A and B places and not inviting me. Then, before I knew it, they had a group chat together, without me, and friends A and B abandoned the group chat that had me in it. I felt so hurt, they didn't even try to hide it. And I could feel myself being replaced again. 
So of course, when September rolled around and I was with A B and C (they all knew how hurt I was by the way) for the weekend, of course I was tense. So maybe I snapped, maybe I was a bit nippy, but I didn't get the chance to apologise. It's like they saw me at a weak point and decided ""Oh, this is an excuse to get rid of her for good!"". I should also mention that friends A and B were always ""jokingly"" mean to me in the past, especially in high school, and it's something we've argued over before, so I think to cut me off like that was pretty hypocritical.
Since then, it's been tense. That's 7 months now! I'm still ""friends"" with friend B, but she hides that fact, never posting about me or talking to me publicly (twitter, discord etc.). Even on my birthday night she never posted any pictures, she pretended it didn't happen, and in the past couple of weeks she's been flat out ignoring me. This is gonna sound dumb but she hurt me the other day by ignoring my request to ""virtually"" hang out on Animal Crossing and 20 minutes later she was playing AC with friend A and C.
It's been a stressful 7 months, avoiding everyone because I KNOW I'm the black sheep of the group, going to parties yet feeling totally isolated. I even saw friend A at a work night out, she asked me if I was okay because she knows I get anxious in those situations and she said she didn't want to stop being friends with me. She told me to go to friend B's party in December and we could talk then, however when I went she ignored me and friend C followed her around all night glaring at me. It was so upsetting, getting my hopes up for her to hurt me like that. But she acts like what I did was despicable, the worst thing in the world, but she flat out lied to me! I felt sick that night and drank straight vodka for the first time ever. It wasn't pretty.
Now, back to present day, yesterday. Two girls who I thought were still my friends from that big group (and honestly? They talked to me often, commented on my posts, this is all so sudden?) Cut me off and blocked me out of no where. I can't escape this, as soon as I felt better about the whole situation this happened. I noticed at 1am last night because I was struggling to sleep, and this kept me awake until 3am. I left our discord and blocked them back, but I feel sick to my stomach. It's like they waited until I was happy again and tore me right down. All I can think of is them all talking in their group chat and laughing at me,having fun, being friends, hating me, and I can't take it anymore. I'm 21, they're all 19/20, but this feels like high school drama, and I CAN'T TAKE IT. I don't know how to stop feeling anxious about this whole situation, but 3 weeks ago I lost an old friend to suicide, and I've started having darker thoughts again and my mental health is crumbling. There's 3 girls left in that group that are still nice to me, and I am so so thankful for them. 2 of which don't even talk to that group anymore either, they agree that they're petty and hurtful, but they're not my close friends, they've already known each other forever. I don't have any close friends, and I feel so alone.
I have work friends, but none of them know the real me. The depressed, anxious, lowkey bit of a loser me. They don't even know that I'm a lesbian because I'm scared of their reactions. Don't get me wrong, they're all lovely and I'm happy I'm friends with them, but when I am with them I feel like a lost puppy just following them around. 

I can't even talk to my family. I've heard my parents calling me fat and lazy, they've said to my face that I'm disgusting (and it's true, one of my depression habits is a lack of hygiene and I hate it) and they constantly say ""No wonder all your friends left you."" I think my Dad gave me anger issues, so I constantly argue with them, but I'm the devil when I act like that, but my 51 year old Dad can throw tantrums like a child all he likes. I'm sick of it. They're supportive one minute ""You can always talk to us! We struggle with depression too"" but the next its ""Get over yourself, you're supposed to be a lady, you're pathetic."" and I never know what one it's going to be.
We don't talk to the rest of my family, so I can't even vent to an aunt or uncle. I feel so alone. I look forward to my days off work then spend them drowning in anxiety, surrounded by my dark thoughts. I can't take this anymore. It's been 7 months of hell. My antidepressants aren't enough for this but I'm too anxious to go to the doctor as it was a struggle enough getting them to prescribe me them in the first place. I have no one, and I can't even make new friends because of my anxiety. I'm 21 and I don't have any close friends, I've never been kissed, I've never dated, I've never felt truly happy and it's all because of this dumb anxiety and depression. I just can't do this, it's all too much and I feel so so so alone.",3.5260753889509573,4.2705001934749625,4.401211792759592,89.30479222598345,72.103186646434,7.462602344544682,26.395504343911014,7.570353721122517,1.1724482049058684,4957,157,1099,55,91,1602,423,1318,0.187,0.635,0.177,-0.8983,3,7,2,0,0,2,177.0,8,3,22,11,72,102,13,10,55,1,86,16,5,5,24,207,193,107,2,8,29,4,16,12,26,3,8,5,0,4,58,84,2,14,39,9,1,17,39,44,1,10,65,25,179,58,143,116,31,169,2,13,4,3,131,69,3,8,92,712,237,8,0.0,0.0,0.028653840637675187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.026028335536911636,0.0,0.0,0.15205493950913035,0.03240256126251484,0.02348140700746324,0.048864375424813485,0.0,0.0,0.05990309812790714,0.0,0.08984979469666747,0.1326863483117304,0.08735997235169048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07841730659430526,0.02745023848009319,0.0,0.0,0.1128908385973019,0.024516697373820995,0.12529496014041294,0.0,0.09994226286377793,0.0,0.030814429285471606,0.02596899547848031,0.06411310842258024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08994805339161226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06346147434388072,0.0,0.04688758600972983,0.03248936097079109,0.0,0.05680969786071996,0.0,0.10116048810781428,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0300540526732251,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06067920814269528,0.032747264817060716,0.1745445715784265,0.026560318332063137,0.0,0.02805739753167446,0.026389376094363672,0.0,0.05536123730314299,0.0,0.16331375906847842,0.0629303342627481,0.14096438220157964,0.0,0.0,0.04995193654779217,0.0,0.0,0.5898259472921116,0.0,0.12272673797233437,0.02816745708036885,0.08343773140316747,0.02462810932592392,0.023484099957225245,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051930824182086326,0.0937716857097387,0.0,0.05797933855906176,0.0,0.062422530661894675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.062046784870658414,0.0,0.029163868894534838,0.0,0.0,0.15716733282543,0.0,0.0,0.030647116827840014,0.0,0.02609899072529666,0.0,0.0,0.11295912368038515,0.023934587195267528,0.0,0.0,0.09570824913876873,0.060050870143855635,0.0,0.1721420716008411,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.024657342567522268,0.0,0.06410589259075145,0.0,0.026501058114470958,0.0,0.039199771401373054,0.029769253355432,0.058997724427304714,0.0959540362531724,0.0,0.0,0.05918155825561396,0.03114927266832693,0.0,0.0,0.07031127991217502,0.0,0.0431700481537033,0.02177213158717099,0.1585247191975295,0.028358758853887577,0.03122765290162792,0.1653298968941668,0.0,0.0,0.033429723133101094,0.06162260294693268,0.0,0.13927887203076025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03260389574100625,0.031797032675535526,0.056060197804687836,0.04071291331421646,0.0,0.06135571750327649,0.0,0.05551464177062192,0.0,0.08436428865597842,0.05974501297344064,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.033421275457656004,0.03762110141512026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.025075656300775986,0.05586146140625617,0.02335046362797457,0.02939726822556423,0.059433408129028975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048578395153641735,0.09901499524754144,0.02938398851434617,0.0,0.0,0.022604904938131592,0.0,0.0,0.06234938694544991,0.0,0.0703474694520833,0.0736458042586325,0.033634968792842036,0.1534817810087986,0.0,0.032118118899017944,0.033320538255828154,0.0,0.0,0.06623147586111586,0.18880554227240784,0.0,0.027033305630624702,0.0,0.0,0.019507328346171183,0.05644345730977865,0.0,0.06993230969335949,0.017121674933619654,0.0,0.0,0.02805739753167446,0.0,0.0199354022764695,0.0,0.02868317247386688,0.0,0.03531981268136429,0.0,0.0,0.024227371146862985,0.01731893021437582,0.023306810470817618,0.07065916031349663,0.0,0.026400668302641653,0.054439188146147184,0.0,0.06556499737010171,0.0,0.056609350119867126,0.031842685699985177,0.0855058231173775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03210359383311648,0.0,0.03781733919257417
mentalhealth,pathesis,2020/04/20,"Has anyone ever been to a mental hospital?  

So I haven’t had to do this before but a councilor I spoke to mentioned b/c I’m not doing very well mentally I should look into care options like finding a councilor, seeing a psychologist and therapy all that stuff. 

But she also mentioned Mental hospitals and advised me to familiarize myself with all my options not just therapy and I could really use some advice, I would like to hear from people who actually went through a mental hospital or looked into it.

Sorry if what I’m asking is confusing, doing research on my options is apart of my HW.

People who attended mental hospitals even only for a few days or a long time what was it like?

Would you recommend going?

Should I only go if it’s my absolute last resort?

Could I keep my phone? what was I allowed to keep? Would any electronics be ok?

Could I bring a sketch book and pencils?

Am I allowed to see friends or will I be isolated and alone?

If my insurance won’t cover it will I be denied care and what did your stay do to your credit?

How much did it cost and was it worth it? did it help you and are you better?

How does getting discharged work? Will I be allowed to leave? 

I want to hear real life experiences from people and you don’t have to tell me why you went, I just want to know if it honestly helped you and was not as scary and abusive like I’ve seen so many people talk about. 

I’m looks up my own research but hearing from others would really help. 

sorry if this is the wrong place to ask too btw, I don't use reddit very often and a lot of time I don't make posts on it.",3.0011396011396023,4.545813814814816,4.675555555555559,83.73653846153849,74.43209876543209,7.577207977207978,24.80721747388414,8.263242389622931,1.540822317188984,1252,40,250,21,26,423,167,324,0.083,0.745,0.172,0.9862,3,1,0,0,0,0,26.0,0,8,0,2,13,14,0,1,10,1,41,1,0,8,3,65,72,29,0,16,16,0,0,4,1,10,1,4,0,0,21,15,0,2,2,1,3,6,8,2,1,0,13,10,36,12,28,42,7,21,0,0,6,0,27,7,0,15,10,181,57,7,0.0,0.099265796943984,0.08175735663785871,0.0,0.0,0.08186900863617118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08677098525947992,0.0,0.06699896852723079,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05697338586340036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058581040093281786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15664629154532342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07129075061411616,0.0,0.0,0.07409674855486725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17083892590194885,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20067493602823244,0.0,0.0,0.05403127614686978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07331658790148153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05533600953140457,0.0757839567040227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0819530785576702,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07657355397085948,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0647283484703256,0.0,0.04377167886620202,0.0,0.09522839817030684,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28327900831136155,0.0,0.1684682378946787,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14893532211599328,0.0,0.0,0.04604338822456586,0.0682920173266581,0.0,0.08871109895387334,0.0,0.0,0.05917640896026868,0.1637230289441536,0.0,0.0,0.07414281055279906,0.21106271674284716,0.0,0.0,0.07122690117498395,0.0,0.0,0.05592391140702276,0.08493993856525811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4221535104029439,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06158806192170922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12743718313117824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2323304729502875,0.0,0.08753244183070323,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0802382401061345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09536017078600573,0.10734343938036894,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1335238905863005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18757007343626653,0.0,0.08929850971148058,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.095908245906707,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06733932394072065,0.0732275578945402,0.0,0.19161984280121344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.097705777140736,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14471832785220046,0.0,0.13825482233243505,0.09883142521991728,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07532843087913574,0.1553301065857104,0.07559856869565575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0609929587068113,0.0,0.0,0.23806010478737,0.09160045955305557,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,beccaprincesszomb,2020/04/20,"mental health i’ve dealt with being bullied since 2nd grade i’m in 8th now suppose to be in 9th and it’s still not clearing up. I’ve done all i can. I’ve ignored them, stood up for myself, blocked them, but it still happens. I’ve went homeschooled and nothing has seen to help. Plus family problems, anxiety, i’m stressing myself out. i haven’t got to my work in a month now i can’t sit down and stay down without breaking down. I’ve been to one therapist but she just said “it’ll get better” and “stop stressing” i can’t help myself at all. I’m off my antidepressant ( well secretly went off because my doctor wouldn’t listen to me ) it caused more nightmares and panic attacks but no one listened. It helped so much but the panic attacks and nightmares were just there and it hurt. I’ve been sick but they can’t find anything wrong with me. I always pass out in stressful moments. I’m not in a good situation.. i don’t know what to do or who to run to.",0.5129591836734662,2.9247380918367334,2.036987755102043,94.42229795918371,89.0,4.360489795918368,21.61551020408163,5.927762680638738,0.17885820408163244,750,27,158,6,25,242,113,196,0.276,0.6629999999999999,0.061,-0.9936,0,0,0,0,0,0,21.0,0,0,3,2,9,14,2,5,3,0,16,3,0,1,3,35,31,15,0,2,11,0,0,0,0,2,3,3,0,0,8,12,0,3,3,0,0,4,10,11,1,2,10,4,18,3,28,17,4,29,0,1,1,0,12,15,0,1,7,103,26,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10666958412531663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09806981211481618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10549462487901252,0.0,0.0,0.2916835772154028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07814726942821942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337920207755507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316929046722732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13121433650026104,0.0,0.13118931501426034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12085205445582076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11716908796652395,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06697727120603825,0.0,0.0,0.10752496708492057,0.10253028527291952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11336355720562713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13626666314398198,0.0,0.0,0.2577818158075671,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13723678147790694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07045332919004932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12919170975034794,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10232505681759416,0.0,0.09423902471261354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12300779917487248,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17373824974362526,0.0,0.0,0.3008214533008193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12266653768566045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1219440298793201,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10604529707920726,0.14409800286886965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1366401896880185,0.2047554479921206,0.10717783995050127,0.4405452563765159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14884577516890507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11526386182123037,0.2376784931429031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12357665031822553,0.0,0.09332842702816924,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14016252017283146,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,TE_Slendy,2020/04/20,"I don't know what to do As some of you know this is the time that people are being accepted into uni. I'm not one of those people, all five of my offers have turned me down, not because my personal statement was bad or my grades weren't good enough but because courses were full and one uni just didn't want me. Ontop of that there's this whole quarantine, and because of it combine with the stress of being turned down for all my options I missed the deadline for some coursework that was really important. When all of this happened at once I ended up breaking down and going slightly mental to my girlfriend over text (Not mental as in angry but mental as in everything I said didn't make sense) and i havent heard back from her in two days. I don't know what to do, I don't know how to tell my mum because I'm scared she'll  get angry or disappointed in me. I can't explain what's happened to my teachers because they'll just dismiss it as an excuse and won't listen. I had plans for the next decade or so, I'd planned it out and I like to stick to plans cause I'm slightly autistic. It feels like my worlds ending because I can't see a way to recover from this. Only my closest friend and girlfriend know, they say there will be ways around it but honestly, I don't think I have the effort anymore. I've been through a lot and idk thats probably something common you hear on this sub-reddit.  I feel like my problems are small compared to some on here but even so I don't feel like I have the willpower to continue.  

I know this will probably be buried under people with much more important or worse problems than me but if even one person can offer some advice or something idk how I could thank you.",6.0408867440808365,5.4170750401146135,6.213798823706836,83.22887498114919,66.50716332378224,8.837339767757504,31.2624038606545,7.85451343220497,1.9751971346704875,1355,45,279,13,19,433,174,349,0.122,0.7859999999999999,0.092,-0.8934,1,1,2,0,0,0,22.0,0,3,2,4,14,16,0,2,9,0,35,0,0,4,3,59,64,28,0,5,16,1,3,4,3,5,0,5,0,2,19,13,0,0,13,0,0,1,15,7,0,5,10,9,39,9,46,44,13,33,0,2,1,0,23,20,0,12,13,199,58,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09397462860583276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0953731924364007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08561024770079598,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07394754863590874,0.08029658092582431,0.3517401136205299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09879141777519347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07678262669398131,0.0,0.0,0.062020649737755826,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17035328201929206,0.09936764468830048,0.0,0.12703661692918153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08642993959723694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14587686845038988,0.20610813115528487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0742994523703109,0.0,0.05024400971050391,0.0,0.054654706951154514,0.08066147505049906,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17008276289832766,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10838875435023147,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31710976206295804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1879320526235262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08175891825452195,0.0,0.0,0.06419314087478173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29074532609330417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07069482508779935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10227616387746444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1024161868456035,0.1954985508520765,0.07314038703306602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20001313934020015,0.1679410412740414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20737155954033654,0.18404030500653115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061607927206449836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09147815238017896,0.07647695624620582,0.096281325787083,0.0,0.07663374845307197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14807023564466024,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11016055516906244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08405540352190304,0.08853892431612177,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06162081524144529,0.0,0.0,0.056076556149894666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2092071655046998,0.09394253412845688,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.056722602571758825,0.15266796865479967,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10736856267703156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0980037958245814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,treedy99,2020/04/20,"When I told the first ER I went to that I have General Anxiety Disorder, they dismissed my concerning medical symptoms and missed the fact I have SEVERE BACTERIAL PNEUMONIA from COVID-19 The other day I took a trip to the hospital because I was having BAD  chest pains and concerning symptoms such as: shallow breathing, and intense buzzing and tingling throughout my entire body, and very bad dizziness. I could barely speak or walk when it was at its worst. That whole week I had COVID like symptoms (fever, sore throat, dry cough,  extreme tiredness), but when it reached its peak I had to go the ER.  They asked me originally if I took any medication - so I told them I  took a low dose of an antidepressant for my general anxiety disorder. As soon as I told the nurse this, she left me alone in the room (barely checking on me) when I felt like I was going to collapse. When she came in, I pointed to my vitals with concern - she scoffed and said ""yeah, of  course,  your oxygen is low and your heart rate is 125 bpm. you are  working yourself into a fit!"" I wasn't hyperventilating, I was just  breathing more quickly because every breath I took was shallow. I tried to tell her I was nervous about the buzzing, the buzzing didn't happen after me being nervous. Then the doctor came in and just said: ""you just  had a panic attack you are fine, Do you need us to hook you up with a  therapist?"" I tried to explain to him I never had this bad of chest pain and uncontrollable shaking/tingling in my entire body and my vision blacking out from it. He just smiled and said ""yeah you might have  COVID, stay home, get plenty of rest and remember to try your best not to panic!"" the thing is...I knew chest pain was a serious symptom of COVID,  and I get panic attacks from time to time but never experience burning/stabbing chest pain like that and that WEIRD BODILY SENSATION. I  begged the doctor to not discharge me and stay to look at my vitals.  Because when the nurse left me alone my oxygen saturation got to 76 -  and it supposed to be 92 or higher! I wanted to show him how it fluctuated, but since the last reading said 92 ""I was fine"" I went home and the next day the burning got SO SO bad in my lungs. Every time I  would inhale even lightly I had SHARP, STABBING PAIN, the dizziness got  way worse I couldn't walk, I had a HIGH fever, and genuinely felt like I  was on my death bed. Every time I exhaled there would be a noticeably  loud crackling sound my boyfriend could even hear. I also started to cough up blood. I went to another ER, and I chose to not mention my anxiety diagnosis and they took me SO much more seriously. They decided to actually do detailed testing on me (blood tests, CT scan, urine  tests) not just the old fashioned x-ray and stethoscope. They found an  abnormality in my blood from BACTERIA in my bloodstream. They found my lungs were dangerously very filled with phlegm and fluid in the CT Scan.  They showed me the picture and said it is very clear it is a bad  ""COVID-19 Bacteria Induced Pneumonia Case"" just by seeing how blocked my lungs were I was so terrified. Luckily, immediately after they  instantly put me on VERY STRONG ANTIBIOTICS through an IV to try to help  me as soon as possible. They told me when that tingling happened, my body was reacting to the lack of oxygen from all the gunk in my lungs.  They said it was pretty severe for my age, but they were going to do  what they could to help me. Even now that I am on an inhaler and strong  antibiotics I still have difficulty breathing (but I know that if I  never went back to the hospital and listened to the other ER that said I  was just panicking, it could have been much worse - I could have died)  It makes me so sad how biased those doctors were towards my mental illness. But I just want to say to anyone with scary medical symptoms  (who is not getting taken seriously by doctors due to your anxiety diagnosis) PLEASE keep trying to get help. Not all doctors will dismiss you. If you feel there is something genuinely wrong, don't stop looking for treatment until you get the help you need!!",6.310156155991905,6.709631482005143,6.396850079308647,78.68338210359352,65.79948586118253,9.397626210140569,33.39123776185528,9.252503621752664,2.8641717661215336,3215,131,608,54,47,1024,320,778,0.196,0.708,0.096,-0.9983,1,2,1,1,0,0,96.0,1,14,13,5,38,40,3,6,38,2,59,49,21,7,7,101,117,60,2,16,25,0,4,4,0,4,28,13,4,0,28,33,0,3,11,3,1,19,13,29,4,1,57,26,113,11,83,47,11,87,0,4,6,0,59,29,0,6,40,416,141,10,0.0,0.0,0.04644943646713743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0985957357905766,0.0,0.03806463980671641,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03236872834210839,0.04991135649231386,0.14565141138046092,0.0,0.0,0.03328209731687565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044498331808699214,0.10830071910453537,0.0,0.036600439720828194,0.1987145094176332,0.08704712369406359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049951868353894126,0.0,0.0,0.1586141785734019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10888039782877652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19001832729822588,0.0,0.0,0.061394409795784165,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04939990538386401,0.0,0.1091044008838354,0.2435962822361523,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09431541936191956,0.0,0.12031179907751748,0.0,0.0,0.04656063346828044,0.0,0.0,0.024067318114310902,0.0,0.09140437678839268,0.0,0.0,0.04048740502933508,0.0,0.10437897132939997,0.0,0.0,0.12434170453684346,0.0,0.08115426450744621,0.0,0.11420701567490207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08418269470516647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05364716130812888,0.05640465402462697,0.12761754268354766,0.05029060900217292,0.09549069545349516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04230788559482385,0.0,0.0,0.0261589846347646,0.0387992695761688,0.0,0.0,0.10343219009663827,0.0,0.0,0.09301722491878184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07994179080710444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03177248233942364,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1438519594578545,0.047968264795294265,0.05049466771664097,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06998099955794959,0.07058762249014214,0.11013308775620292,0.0,0.050621726344244514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05419140213767025,0.049946798000259605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2532417082014564,0.16754035327719718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05224904687761988,0.04499612911453695,0.053660349445787334,0.0,0.04842496018996653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047849810950945884,0.0,0.0,0.047611551632385916,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05392001516032311,0.0,0.31694065112475395,0.03785237345599364,0.0,0.0,0.03792997797192365,0.0,0.0,0.10754589906280426,0.0,0.0393741123205265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03664378220868805,0.0,0.0,0.03369058415017201,0.10146769964264606,0.03801235995152038,0.03979462007947817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24736622060549865,0.0,0.0,0.04160333623715794,0.0,0.0,0.05526572541504463,0.031622441826094534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11102067078497876,0.0,0.0,0.1819302788146545,0.26441937296120194,0.16158186492287732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05725534024982047,0.0,0.0,0.15709555323935456,0.056149858501949534,0.03778160931042617,0.0381807825729725,0.0,0.0,0.17649777864627414,0.0,0.05314221605264123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.034652399207863734,0.0,0.0970142239373197,0.06762546006508602,0.05204167430726368,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,helpmewiththisissue8,2020/04/20,"Can you guys please help me out here? This is absolutely killing me. Hi. I made this throwaway account to look for help on an issue thats plaguing my mind. I’m 17, a dude, and haven’t been to school in around a month due to the quarantine shutting down schools.

Sometime back in around February, a student got moved from another class into my class with me and all of my friends. He’s not a bully, but he’s extremely cocky, and will basically throw anyone under the bus if he can get away free. He doesn’t do much other than copy and be a nuisance to the people he sits around. He’s an asshole but he doesn’t physically hurt anyone or anything like that. 

Recently, I’ve been having this issue thats been killing me and making my everyday life terrible. You know when you play a song, that used to be your ex’s favorite song? And you can’t stand to listen to it anymore because it reminds you of your ex? This is much similar to the issue I’m having now. Whenever I’m doing something, whether it be watching a show or whatever, If a random thought pops up into my head that reminds me of him, I instantly start hating the show as it consistently reminds me of that asshole. For example, If I’m listening to music and this random thought just happens to trigger, my mind for some reason instantly wants to turn the song off because now it’ll forever be associated with the thought that I’m reminded of this dick.

This overthinking is making me literally hate everything and its making it impossible for me to enjoy anything anymore. For some unknown reason, my mind just does this. It instantly connects whatever I’m doing to me being reminded of this asshole.

Does anyone know how to stop these thoughts? How to stop my brain from doing this unnecessary garbage? Any help would be appreciated. I’m feeling extremely unmotivated and I feel like I hate everything now. I just cant get this asshole out of my head. 

Any help would be appreciated... I’m sorry for the long read. Maybe me saying this will actually help me a little bit, I’m getting it off my chest to someone atleast. Really, any help or support is much appreciated. Schools officially ending soon and maybe the fact that I’ll never see him again will finally stop this torment... but I really, really need some help with those. I feel like a mess. An overthinking mess.",4.899237339841367,6.428778138702463,5.954024811877165,76.5011287370348,69.62639821029083,9.176571079926788,32.11368720764694,9.573946990214177,3.136287695749441,1856,83,339,42,33,616,201,447,0.121,0.743,0.136,0.5642,0,1,1,0,0,0,51.0,0,7,0,0,16,17,5,0,22,0,33,6,5,10,3,71,73,24,2,7,14,2,3,3,1,6,1,6,0,1,33,20,0,3,11,7,2,2,7,9,0,0,9,12,37,9,52,51,8,41,0,1,3,1,31,18,1,11,22,218,70,7,0.0,0.0,0.07293434365423715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15247495789690915,0.07837020862965703,0.0,0.0,0.14824172730607235,0.15677744066670055,0.0,0.12300742302389303,0.19960028604573027,0.0,0.0,0.07021961682012053,0.05746956801905816,0.0,0.0911202275921028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08159547513301905,0.0,0.0,0.08343328253019659,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13080895560868974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619644402602576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13434093176023118,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11337063592322902,0.10678690938113336,0.0,0.08187276512194433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0577430558624478,0.0,0.11714390484362287,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059775491821458276,0.0,0.0,0.07400321929466247,0.06609132480767774,0.0,0.0,0.22136744547353626,0.1534072597941283,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3506711650142076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08000949267818509,0.0,0.0,0.23402384821610334,0.0,0.0,0.16537494455464666,0.0,0.08214904292101131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.052790265302356185,0.10954089162292042,0.07490796975989908,0.0,0.06614153694206905,0.0627618167895914,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0707197140222176,0.14966630309914591,0.0,0.15017045577273586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22639482109134776,0.0,0.05965584296043953,0.07943557748473656,0.1648249793505319,0.05541791578110895,0.05764321436419057,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05181451325097389,0.0,0.0,0.08204082181437759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07475908283892024,0.0,0.1436388776267678,0.15368798638036918,0.07379560516168276,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05943533923648703,0.0,0.2269191415474153,0.059557192909307465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06332599137440688,0.057537623869566415,0.07391864107842787,0.08366403194667582,0.05290054797670341,0.0,0.0,0.187455094219704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08481276973040007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2373372175923357,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08129441509443318,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06455037620279029,0.0,0.0,0.044082914536706284,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10618467992937604,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,fitzgeraldeleven,2020/04/20,"Why did I feel powerful after leaving a toxic relationship? I got hurt by a crush last February. 

For some reason, I thought it was the beginning of finding something real. Since then, though, I have just been in one long depressive episode. 

Last July, my best friend resigned from work, and we don't live near each other. So now I have no-one. 

I tried talking to girls for about a month after what happened, but I gave up on that. From my heartbreak, I have just been thrown into the deep end. I have to build a life from scratch.

Why do people think that leaving a toxic relationship is a good thing? 

People say that it's a learning experience. Well this experience has taught me everything I need to know... 

Even if my life changes dramatically tomorrow morning, there's no victory in it.",3.9626484254001006,6.163173731543625,4.7189261744966435,81.64449148167269,73.4295302013423,7.806091894682499,28.911202891068665,8.617729084823388,2.317208156943728,622,26,116,12,13,200,103,149,0.10300000000000001,0.8059999999999999,0.09,-0.2287,1,0,1,0,0,0,24.0,1,0,0,3,9,8,0,0,9,0,12,2,0,1,0,18,22,6,0,2,4,0,2,0,1,0,2,1,0,1,10,4,0,0,7,0,0,0,2,4,1,1,8,3,15,4,19,14,3,18,0,4,0,0,8,7,0,2,11,82,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15579952958114762,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15705091308985725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12786831384564715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1314914262361719,0.0,0.0,0.09805637875732028,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1334262057347371,0.29044458317214544,0.0,0.0,0.07506579761790144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13568967973195514,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1146997679754982,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12452113949295543,0.11873696222235078,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13128261931083346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15892941772749686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158969093093138,0.2420293032978409,0.0,0.31439524435033217,0.0,0.0,0.20972326771098496,0.0,0.0,0.13109283161967045,0.1313823597918007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11849929387604648,0.0,0.0,0.1100811515227182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060028576666204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20584683504826712,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1689798939991975,0.0,0.15264152645854273,0.0,0.31878079472117904,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11806128924332784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12280758216594452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11429170155839742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11932646227129537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09863017586866014,0.09512712389087616,0.14586112024016207,0.117860595456877,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10079454232012243,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13348329979029602,0.0,0.2679239774716859,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10808059184481783,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,briemineforgouda,2020/04/20,"Mental Health, Journaling, & Covid-19 survey for a passion project Hello! Me and my friends decided to take on a passion project while we're all sheltering in place, and we wanted to focus on mental health and the impact Covid-19 is having.  There's an emphasis on journaling in our survey but we are open to hearing out everyone!

Our goal is to create a product that can hopefully contribute to improving mental health, even if it's a small impact.  

Thanks a bunch! Survey link: https://forms.gle/DZHnrFATbszUXSmX8

side note: this post seemed a bit impersonal so I wanted to say more :) I've personally struggled with a roller coaster of a mental health journey for as long as I can remember.  So I've been there, but I haven't been there during a situation like this.  I really can't fathom what you all are experiencing, but I want to understand so I can help those around me and my community, even if it's only one or two people.  Thank you again for your time, we  really appreciate it! 

and if you have any questions, please feel free to message me!",5.050592783505156,7.2484651288659805,5.926378865979384,74.16936211340209,70.3917525773196,8.973711340206185,28.619845360824733,9.516144504307137,2.825598969072165,841,32,146,20,16,276,115,194,0.028999999999999998,0.7390000000000001,0.23199999999999998,0.9916,0,0,0,0,0,0,32.0,5,4,0,1,10,9,0,1,11,0,13,6,0,0,2,32,24,18,0,7,7,0,1,1,1,0,4,2,0,1,8,12,0,0,7,1,1,1,2,1,0,2,2,4,20,9,22,22,5,17,0,0,0,2,17,11,0,7,5,102,28,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1312554270331015,0.0,0.08237953460147031,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10784051950278273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13225379484784652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16002400569378988,0.0,0.0,0.11575471501586608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061252158083184224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09359266860656554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5150657497139259,0.13653388339956626,0.0,0.08119776642242615,0.0,0.0,0.12031961727155566,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0591830146811879,0.0,0.0,0.1072053228858256,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4883235804275701,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08208777902232801,0.0921326306851358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0839834071002581,0.10577500721717052,0.12656579403289184,0.13297563375541516,0.0,0.0,0.11601888806525433,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1357048215870665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15521111207744814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13722830590268134,0.0,0.0,0.09633560132201016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1102815479806153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13616673397497006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12664210784870156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0910824035470945,0.0,0.0,0.2230593614876168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07063786298419247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11833643700258202,0.1261112886030928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21435500164420654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,imaginearagog,2020/04/20,"Someone at my door at midnight The dogs started barking at midnight, so I came downstairs. I saw a person through the window and screamed. Then he rang the doorbell. My parents came downstairs and answered it. It was someone who used to be our neighbor.

Some backstory. My sister and this guy used to be friends when they were little. He had autism spectrum disorder (previously called Aspergers). When my sister was a teenager she diagnosed herself with ASD. One day (when she was an adult) she got fed up with us and decided to move to New York without telling us (this was pretty normal for her). I drove her to the airport and she told me she was going to Iceland (we have family in New York and we were able to confirm that she had contacted them to stay with them).

Earlier in the day we had been going through some old stuff in the basement and found a letter the boy wrote to my sister when they were little kids. It said they should get married when they’re adults. My mom thought it was cute and sent a picture of it to his mom. I think that’s what triggered this event.

When my parents answered the door, he told them that my sister was in trouble because she was doing the same thing he did. For a second I was really concerned something had happened to my sister, until I heard more of the conversation. I didn’t hear all of it, but I heard my dad ask if he had driven here, making me think it was a bit of a drive (I don’t remember where he lives. For some context, he’s about 31). He talked about clocks, information entropy, and asked if he could have the love letter back. My dad told him to go home and the guy said he would sleep in his car.

After he left my dad told me he thinks the guy is having a psychotic episode. My mom called his mom and she told us that he was very sick mentally, and that he probably wasn’t even aware of the pandemic.

So I turned on the house alarm (I think he’s harmless, but it makes us feel safer), and right now he’s probably outside our house in his car. Don’t know what his current living situation is, but I’m hoping his mom will be able to convince him to seek help.",4.607259371833841,5.315292501182037,4.947175785207701,86.50125,69.61465721040189,7.839547450185747,29.291540020263422,7.83500028581142,1.7004887537993931,1660,60,344,19,28,525,202,423,0.032,0.9109999999999999,0.057999999999999996,0.897,3,0,1,0,0,0,49.0,9,0,6,1,15,9,0,1,24,0,38,5,1,5,1,56,81,28,0,7,6,15,1,0,2,3,2,7,5,8,21,21,1,0,13,0,0,12,5,3,0,2,43,9,61,6,43,31,7,49,0,0,1,1,101,16,0,6,20,227,82,0,0.14477024042009695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1353406322468545,0.0,0.0,0.055659689374708034,0.0,0.044125297425650106,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07902580368760502,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14782660175214746,0.1655785878084856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.057793628456885286,0.0,0.0,0.09336482852779107,0.0,0.0,0.07346937331838893,0.0,0.0,0.08295961891343208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.047809689218409376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06823824922330951,0.0,0.036600091707710135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0793665481311121,0.05592456431522922,0.0,0.03781823772408943,0.0,0.1234143957933612,0.0,0.05789299313855002,0.0,0.0,0.21501794814100733,0.0640099227462153,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08158329126701927,0.0,0.04851822026394685,0.0,0.07260817749262985,0.07189475708586485,0.0,0.1670454202202456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03978096903300842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07864664490422096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1450978134077276,0.12783477460470302,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06533039709334716,0.0,0.09663525963975493,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0729471760097588,0.0,0.0,0.4238828897027665,0.0,0.07693392730279039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13982000031819752,0.0,0.0,0.07092204898961106,0.0,0.0,0.07595600717260541,0.0,0.04905003079596415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16075021958364175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06320389494317206,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07364169017407504,0.15608680479719134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.046371761533491464,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08199823056211145,0.061816497153804,0.1377096506909893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136390793374301,0.07243739587818003,0.0,0.12266335491076105,0.05572560195470453,0.0,0.0,0.0512345606488414,0.07715290699720666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08286364465222501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058180417725215934,0.06326778556690378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04808945746923857,0.1855258489901919,0.0,0.05746569995038998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3458354217843999,0.0,0.0,0.0787342248780119,0.0,0.0,0.3482815482716408,0.1250350059104806,0.0,0.05972530495633978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06977667281344832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0514203125666606,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Bloodpaint3r,2020/04/20,I feel more depressed than i ever been. And im alone. I have an extreme sense a dark energy flowing through every part of my body. A sense of emptiness. Ive been in bed all day. I cant listen to music or watch anything. Nothing i wanna do right now. I feel very suicidal right now. I keep having flashes of killing myself. Can someone please talk to me,0.15958333333333385,2.5476157916666717,2.1318888888888883,92.60200000000002,92.47222222222223,3.991111111111112,22.477777777777767,5.6839178017228535,0.34995111111111177,275,11,55,2,10,91,55,72,0.23600000000000002,0.706,0.059000000000000004,-0.9359,0,1,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,0,3,2,1,0,3,0,8,1,1,0,2,8,12,2,2,1,1,0,2,0,0,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,2,4,11,0,9,10,3,8,0,1,1,0,2,3,0,1,4,38,11,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2355699271341839,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18717222621888674,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2526460209080421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14668663432624218,0.0,0.1959026198799132,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2057418283925312,0.1916366971642207,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23001142307192216,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2456853669278454,0.0,0.0,0.20216828743878795,0.25164006994200444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21824470810955066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24630652232147301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2496721398161695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3884826462517477,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19271791070305486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.248793723937998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1828159445988045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18767032738770856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,RiveraRiconte,2020/04/20,So this happened Soo. Ive been vomiting for like two hrs for no reason. Feeling like a black out coming. Sooo. I wrote my will and testament in case my manager finds me dead at work in 6 hrs.,-0.0030000000000001137,2.256234700000004,2.2800000000000007,92.965,89.5,6.2,20.5,7.554174236665415,0.8373499999999998,148,5,33,3,5,50,34,40,0.14800000000000002,0.705,0.14800000000000002,-0.25,0,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,3,1,0,1,0,7,7,2,1,0,0,0,1,2,0,1,1,0,0,0,1,3,0,0,3,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,2,2,5,2,6,4,0,5,1,0,1,0,1,4,0,0,2,20,6,2,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.33475919814013017,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1964964688967348,0.27762811481445904,0.0,0.0,0.35518896460376304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3436527944910717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3797173444149932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3995630754339498,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.379622412344226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2829178577689727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,moonolive,2020/04/20,"constant intrusive memories i'm 19 and i came home due to the pandemic over a month ago and have been staying with my family. over the past few weeks i have been working through the realization that i was very often emotionally manipulated and gaslighted as i was growing up, and this has obviously led to a lot of difficult feelings as i begin to realize the way that this has irreparably changed me, the way i see myself, and how i interact with others. this is especially difficult to handle as i am currently living with the individual who caused this harm, even though i am an adult now and i am more aware of ways to guard myself from that mental harm. 

i'm seeing a therapist weekly who has been able to help somewhat with processing all of this, along with other traumatic experiences that have been coming to the surface since being back home, but something that has been more troubling is the constant attack of what i can only explain as ""intrusive memories"". many many times throughout the day i will be suddenly hit with a memory that feels incredibly visceral and overwhelming. my body reacts to these and i will feel myself jolt and tense up, and my brain will fill up with thoughts that are loud and fast and uncontrollable. i feel sick to my stomach and i have to close my eyes as tight as i can for 30-60 seconds and focus on my breathing in order to get them to pass. 

i've had intrusive thoughts before, i think everyone has. but these have been debilitating and happening at least 5 times a day, and even after they pass the feelings of mental exhaustion and the exacerbation of the depression i already have continue to stick around. i don't know if this is something that others can even help with, or if i just need to work it out on my own, but if you have any advice or you have experienced anything similar it would really really help. thanks.",8.95382185828877,7.776335735795456,8.978475935828879,67.57080213903744,60.96022727272727,12.827807486631016,37.75133689839572,11.892052765847286,4.5070235294117635,1497,60,268,40,17,492,186,352,0.115,0.843,0.042,-0.9785,1,0,2,0,0,0,25.0,0,2,2,2,10,11,1,2,18,0,39,7,5,5,2,65,61,33,0,5,9,0,6,0,0,4,2,1,2,1,24,31,0,2,11,0,0,7,1,10,0,1,12,11,35,1,50,42,8,45,0,2,3,0,12,13,0,8,20,209,59,2,0.10797343526757797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10551039130589812,0.09571193562041462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1191513707473261,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07342563854881473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08885293729230083,0.09611924908576022,0.0,0.12283537016808795,0.0,0.08302490691835944,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09187744079342958,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11993414571368935,0.0,0.12053406271760385,0.0,0.12349284549474755,0.0,0.11091846067139616,0.11422157774649876,0.09300955386168007,0.0,0.2333618505172695,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1392678666563095,0.0,0.09299736158094034,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12145558184895015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21394630701754366,0.0,0.0,0.10317324449808607,0.0,0.10561873816953044,0.10178774538061827,0.0,0.272973065550098,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05641166348811275,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09548055221937322,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21711695303257045,0.0,0.2166123183783555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059339376273782676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09534252150630694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09179515349791048,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21893623252107486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21762365425343075,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0861833659039209,0.0,0.0,0.08006093412447852,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08211866299032815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10307286141176444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13834109490046662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17208169708094026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0893167414200337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1662464511475065,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11508531567254235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09940743250585707,0.0,0.1253654803974542,0.0,0.06918501754323297,0.10608335193932117,0.17143769370540174,0.12592035680778038,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08908939198866582,0.0,0.2571128614970347,0.17321955382887036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15721189366440858,0.0,0.0,0.07670123050488797,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PopplerAcademia,2020/04/20,"I have to rant about mental issues that I have and I don’t know what they mean. I have always been called OCD from my mom and just random people about stupid things that I do but I know having my clothes be a certain way isn’t really what OCD is about. I’ve done some research on the topic because of some thoughts I was having that would not get out of my head that I kept having to check for over and over again looking up things on the internet and killing my brain over. This is kind of the first problem that I’ve had for a while and I just want to know if it’s normal.

I hate when people self diagnose so it’s hard for me to tell people about problems that I’m having because I don’t want them to feel pity for me or think I’m trying to make excuses. 

Another thing I’ve realized about myself is that I work so much better when I have some extreme time restriction placed on me. It’s hard for me to focus or not get upset for example on a painting that I have due for class until it’s the night before and I stay up all night working on it. This has really effected my school now that I’m in college and working on complicated art projects that need way more preparation then a binge working session one night. 

I feel like so much is wrong with me and this probably sounds stupid. I feel so thrown off balance by this corona virus thing and I barely can do my work because I’m so stressed about how much work I have to do. WHAT DO I DO. 

Please let me know if this is just something normal.",3.8391221664384614,4.456099207667734,4.548735737106345,88.99740149094784,71.30031948881789,7.623246614939908,25.44789289517724,7.62386473244151,1.0719004716263498,1184,33,260,13,21,380,148,313,0.141,0.8,0.059000000000000004,-0.982,0,0,1,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,2,9,19,14,4,2,8,0,32,3,2,3,2,51,55,25,1,10,10,1,5,1,0,1,1,1,0,1,27,11,0,2,12,1,1,0,5,10,0,2,6,7,35,4,42,46,8,31,0,1,1,0,7,15,0,8,14,185,62,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08106672981615662,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10216027723731434,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17817103990483166,0.0,0.08290285458840606,0.0,0.0,0.08616590396372563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10876029837285074,0.09948344410277354,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09888594078676467,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09970123013260727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.147785437846912,0.06960157729862286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0828710099885437,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180274711307698,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17455018106984665,0.09618859001112202,0.0999877916929149,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10168805056556912,0.0,0.0,0.1077880898827596,0.101454803899224,0.21417242971112094,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09962529189936194,0.0,0.04759771199071571,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0818138003618359,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06503300716367116,0.0,0.0,0.10612612104530704,0.0,0.0,0.09818309047230196,0.0,0.0,0.11410484788000536,0.0,0.0,0.2148592670673696,0.07224058400643056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2742847721992266,0.1909147504626215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06601878064018656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026299966987528,0.0,0.10179005318849896,0.10694514213864484,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1050423451271438,0.18644818294902696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12482794008074333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09860091317984444,0.0,0.0,0.10163718414665124,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07500375090065578,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10384378480798832,0.0,0.0,0.11160183277896027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08515513627925092,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2589035963686666,0.06242702669503542,0.0,0.07734583195555775,0.05681022969297899,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0661462612004363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1149294572324136,0.15466538891682596,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4255663190270469,0.0,0.0,0.06920905615552665,0.10652068484539803,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Hush_Angel,2020/04/20,"I Need Guidance and Support Please Stopping Klonopin & Starting Xanax

Hi! I’ve been struggling with GAD, MDD, ADHD Combined Type, PPA/PPD, C-PTSD, and PTSD for a while. I’ve been on a whole host of different medications and found out earlier this week that I have Treatment Resistant Depression. 
I’d been taking Klonopin .5 3x/day since having my son in Nov. of 2018 for Postpartum Anxiety. I’d tried Klonopin a year before short term and it brought enough relief for me to get comfortable working in my previous job. 
Well, I saw a psychiatrist a few months later and he decided to keep me on the Klonopin because it was helping me so much with functioning. I (a 120 lb woman) was also diagnosed with ADHD and put on 30 mg of Adderall 2x/day (60 mg total starting out, no working my way up). SSRIs had only caused issues in the past so I was put on an SSNRI called Pristiq which I’ve gained a chemical dependency on and which showed no improvement in my depression symptoms. 

Well, my husband deployed and I went to live in a small town with family where I could not find mental health resources near me for the life of me. I was on the same medication for over 10 months.


Fast forward to now...
Moved back to where my previous psychiatrist is (husband returned from deployment) and I had been on the same medications listed above the entire time I was gone. 
I saw my psychiatrist last week for the first time. He took me off of the Adderall because of the extremely difficult side effects I was experiencing (felt high, not afraid of consequences, jittery, anxious all of the time, severe insomnia, reckless behavior, etc.). He kept me on the Klonopin but bumped it down to 2x/day since I had only been taking it as needed (1-2 times a day, rarely the full 3). I was also kept on Pristiq. He prescribed Ambien 10mg for severe insomnia (5mg does nothing for me), and Prozasin for PTSD nightmares. 
That week and a couple of weeks before I had episodes that my therapist has told me are actually considered flashbacks where I’d go into fight, flight, freeze, or fawn mode. I’d experience severe panic attacks and dissociation. 
I’d also been experiencing memory loss, extreme fatigue, feeling “out of it”, feeling numb, etc. and at my most recent appointment with my psychiatrist he told me the Klonopin was the most likely culprit of those symptoms. So he told me to stop taking the Klonopin and he instead prescribed me Xanax 1 mg 3x/day scheduled. 
I’ve done as instructed and searched everywhere for support but can only find detoxing articles and rehab sites about coming off benzodiazepines. I’m looking for advice on starting Xanax. I’ve been experiencing extreme fatigue, nausea, drowsiness, dizziness, and all over just feel like I’m a zombie. I’m wondering if these side effects are normal and if they’ll eventually taper off as I get used to Xanax. I’ve just been struggling to adjust and am not sure why. Whether it’s an adjustment to the Xanax, coming off Klonopin, stopping taking 60mg of Adderall daily, or if it’s the Xanax mixing with my other meds (Pristiq, Ambien, Prozasin, as well as Nexplanon and .175 Levothyroxine for hypothyroidism as I have no thyroid). 

Any help or advice would be appreciated!",7.4064201397253715,7.876064741989883,7.434240423994215,71.9398549747049,63.468802698145026,10.35218501565888,37.178944832570465,10.158995162802928,3.907643353408817,2564,120,436,53,35,825,286,593,0.106,0.83,0.064,-0.9745,3,0,0,0,1,0,91.0,0,0,1,7,18,23,2,4,30,0,34,22,0,5,4,81,73,42,0,8,14,3,5,2,0,2,22,0,0,1,16,32,0,6,13,1,0,11,6,13,3,1,34,11,41,10,77,35,15,82,0,5,3,0,20,41,0,10,33,265,57,5,0.0,0.0,0.06633843135074405,0.0,0.16339690187675485,0.13285805296325334,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16309014834842034,0.0,0.07365603244164222,0.0,0.04622856220339788,0.0,0.05200432389442265,0.07679776962503554,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07733678130449878,0.0,0.05227223282988605,0.0,0.08287965120299964,0.0,0.11569152330856043,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06941492696104024,0.0,0.0,0.06983393076307884,0.0,0.11711707330529908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05427630007858057,0.07521830213421737,0.0,0.21920657974174526,0.0,0.11710172085839585,0.0689980168971216,0.0,0.07102437165465071,0.0,0.0,0.05948953872025047,0.06956688793796849,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07024125552124058,0.15163078530805116,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.066497241342593,0.0640852597521945,0.0,0.10311781489441564,0.04856474811593707,0.0652712221710622,0.0,0.12426452278487947,0.05782354197146278,0.0,0.07453628881908599,0.0,0.0,0.0710332288856742,0.0,0.03863445942023594,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07225929705927538,0.0,0.0,0.09113078907268078,0.07182433989781753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07095319896170296,0.06745941400122152,0.06042352669042664,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055412570679058415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.048016108945191975,0.06642294566993277,0.0,0.06002736609710097,0.0,0.0570858701941908,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07551017907390298,0.2054473436704969,0.0685076005903382,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10852157830234957,0.07225171763743933,0.04997293926607664,0.10081224886522533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06660572308623272,0.06522840507067444,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15510499309792658,0.0,0.07975959143029336,0.0,0.0,0.06489436495793173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0746213533050082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23839407529554674,0.136676852954338,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06712180355270121,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23039330887510664,0.0,0.11246710599039073,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1443492541870049,0.0,0.0,0.1705023487726779,0.0,0.14213439268807504,0.0,0.0,0.15428523300626826,0.06407011136236171,0.14131398175941906,0.20444925203239472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07892973113008253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15855815931359032,0.0,0.0,0.1948726975456372,0.0755280053113398,0.046153789018711366,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058712678908775386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05395916261187745,0.21811702498709906,0.0,0.18336588214695831,0.06301791078008233,0.06134115223227472,0.0758969649487291,0.0,0.0,0.07372114077281243,0.09898013757888396,0.0,0.0,0.04829086509223979,0.0,0.0,0.043776731217590965
mentalhealth,LeeLee1980,2020/04/20,"Why do so many sources deem smartphone usage to be harmful to mental health? From doing my own research, many websites and articles say that people tend to be lonelier when they use smartphones too much, or are more susceptible to depression and anxiety with too much smartphone usage. But I believe in many cases, people who use smartphones use them to be LESS lonely. They use them more because they don't talk to as many people in real life as they would online. If that online source of social contact were cut off, they would be much more lonely. Some have social anxiety and find it easier to talk to people online than in real life because it causes much less stress. Surely this is more reason to say that smartphones can really be helpful to mental health? Of course, too much of anything is a bad thing, and if you're using your smartphone instead of caring for physical needs it is a bad thing, but perhaps the reason for choosing your smartphone over yourself is actually something else.",10.777692307692313,8.905689489010992,9.491291208791207,67.53495879120881,57.956043956043956,11.2978021978022,39.23351648351648,9.516144504307137,3.866052747252748,805,30,126,10,8,250,101,182,0.1,0.8590000000000001,0.040999999999999995,-0.7984,0,4,1,0,0,0,15.0,0,2,7,0,6,10,1,1,3,0,18,4,0,8,1,27,26,13,0,5,5,0,0,0,0,2,4,2,0,0,10,5,0,0,4,0,0,0,1,8,0,0,1,2,11,2,26,18,13,6,0,3,0,0,18,5,0,4,1,96,21,1,0.0,0.0,0.09379835060163126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14706165660322432,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0790978077906374,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16051082330932745,0.11718659038193673,0.0,0.0,0.10829328096136376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09799980165171343,0.0987407659215301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08278721734507047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08029515235776202,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08785109203060612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20434016125457616,0.0,0.0,0.06442658900726891,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13578348868560414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3897986170426544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19373083771227856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35329289391019864,0.07127107523845037,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2665474527724974,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21880909805920226,0.06157633989063191,0.19765283277389328,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1528754907087458,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19596258218175966,0.0,0.0739971588979788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11010407418675082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09059108945278004,0.0,0.0,0.15451374105076413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1277144831404884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4150800922566997,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0867325136611993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13656046435072,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,UndyingArtist,2020/04/20,"just a vent i used to think my parents’ divorce didn’t affect me much; i was 8-ish when they split, i’m almost 20 now and i don’t remember it at all so i thought i was good.

my dad and i were driving through our state park and i had said something about the fishermen on the riverbanks, and he tells me about how i used to fish when i was little. like, actually fish, and i apparently got upset that i couldn’t gut and eat what i caught (city laws where we lived at the time). i used to be so active when i was a kid. i played soccer, i did taekwondo, i was a cheerleader (not a *real* one i was like 7, it was like if the ymca had cheerleading teams), i ran around in the woods constantly, i had my own little garden next to my mom’s, i was a competitive swimmer (again, like a kid’s league. but i was part of the competitive group, not the participation group). 

i was such an active kid, i had hobbies and played sports and i was happy. and i was even good at some of them! my mom says she can still see tkd stances when i roughhouse with my brother, and despite being overweight and mostly sedentary i’m still the fastest and strongest person in my family. don’t know how, but i am. 

i guess i’m just bitter because when the divorce came around, all those activities stopped. i know that my parents didn’t mean to take that stuff away, it just kinda got pushed to the back burner because they had bigger things to worry about. i lost access to things i loved doing, and while i’m not blaming my depression and ocd on that, i’m sure having long-term hobbies would have helped me cope better. 

i literally don’t do anything. haven’t since i was a kid. i was in marching band in high school, but i joined up for the gym credit and stuck around because it enabled my weird ocd. i didn’t enjoy it, i was obsessed with it and didn’t know the difference. i don’t have any hobbies or interests and i’m trying to fill that void but nothing is clicking and i can’t focus long enough on anything to enjoy what i’m doing and it’s so frustrating. anything that actually keeps my attention is impractical to do, money-wise and space-wise. 

im pissed that i was cut off from everything i enjoyed doing, while my life was literally being split down the middle, and i didn’t have a chance to try to get back to normal before mental illness beat my ass and i was left with literally nothing to help me get through it.",2.499404031551272,4.263519353783232,3.863597721297108,88.09970858895706,76.32106339468302,6.620333041191938,24.117294770668998,7.447530270364453,0.9912153666374532,1880,61,396,24,42,618,226,489,0.092,0.74,0.168,0.9871,3,0,1,0,2,0,57.0,2,0,3,5,29,26,4,2,22,0,54,8,3,6,3,71,85,40,0,4,12,6,0,4,0,1,3,2,1,5,21,30,2,2,8,8,1,6,15,9,0,1,39,5,67,17,44,41,8,51,0,2,2,2,30,24,2,7,24,272,88,3,0.0,0.0,0.18168999072566813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0932188394495274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06330619270742018,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22982195110664855,0.2486165796761961,0.0,0.0,0.0874636069208424,0.14316499960419155,0.0,0.17024524191870327,0.0,0.07921498658083283,0.0,0.0,0.08233288178193104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10647318878515023,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10060008037645404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08018056103946104,0.0,0.0,0.09726200306879247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09525701918478327,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09618959028996052,0.0,0.061486815817016975,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08366566908899578,0.0,0.08775946320215226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0972741323141616,0.0,0.0,0.1561633922516611,0.14890938905476878,0.0,0.10255204678083582,0.0,0.0,0.0990988545094096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12479607886637555,0.09835749341822003,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055603427629474,0.0,0.0,0.08274502260952726,0.0,0.0,0.15348385375070775,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.101145434093099,0.0,0.06575409013524068,0.1819214614667895,0.18660657858904325,0.08220251344054608,0.16476812748952208,0.0,0.0,0.10162162184080704,0.0,0.08401974911362667,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1014051843717276,0.0,0.0,0.0938154932401542,0.0,0.0,0.21805796768997315,0.0,0.0,0.06843380742440487,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09900508692403856,0.0,0.09121102928881897,0.17864981234905306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06308198732672703,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20673673695997427,0.10081026562850574,0.0,0.0,0.0812849092060717,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10595981363764212,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10545582249784764,0.0,0.08855242594844367,0.07403100990288343,0.0,0.0942147294345587,0.07418278745770446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07700720015633758,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07166726828171828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14868781738479778,0.07782962187589981,0.0,0.0,0.10656880937632696,0.0,0.0,0.08773871873509004,0.0,0.06999408553473987,0.0,0.08136707729957006,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12369323718643985,0.05965000971896695,0.0,0.07390516371072837,0.05428307149525725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12640759402988294,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24120647419321786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09454010254684148,0.0,0.0661303459555283,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,saxamaphone115,2020/04/20,"I’m really tired of feeling nothing at all There’s not much to say. I wake up in the morning feeling nothing and go about my day. If I do feel anything I’m usually sad or very irritable. There are times when I want so badly to  lay down and cry my eyes out but I still just feel completely empty inside. It’s incredibly frustrating. I don’t really know why I’m posting this,, I guess I just want someone to hear it.",1.6564655172413794,3.511071701149426,4.113318965517242,84.9417025862069,79.11494252873564,7.5683908045976995,25.81752873563219,8.472884824447931,1.8447942528735628,326,13,69,7,8,114,62,87,0.207,0.731,0.062,-0.9254,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,0,0,8,3,1,0,1,0,3,3,2,0,1,18,16,7,0,3,6,0,4,0,0,0,1,2,0,0,3,3,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,3,0,0,0,7,9,0,10,16,2,12,0,1,1,0,2,5,0,3,5,41,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16192858105548494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16429842108470907,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20631423515018574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21614746010477826,0.1269032218940205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3979802358180309,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11183143732131427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167692077226828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2217790720072134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10814207491105353,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14465183955360145,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.37762072526422735,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18845550049375226,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25211746377275746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15648291640491174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.166726327161537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15714430566850784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.114740746480933,0.2261632486322935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2167192230978569,0.1623595040461378,0.232125301847272,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17755830737695708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,thegreendorito123,2020/04/20,Can anyone help? My dad is a big asshole. He rarely is nice and always yells at me and my brothers. It has been happening since we were little (around 8 or 9). He would yell at us for small things like breathing to loudly or not understanding a math problem. And it was super harsh too. Calling us little bitches and fucktards and yelling super super loud. It was really really stressful. Also him and my mom would argue a lot too because my dad was a workaholic and would prioritize work over family. Also my mom got super sick and had to be hospitalized for 3 months when I was eleven. Ever since then my body has a hard time with managing with stress and I feel like something was never right. Could I have some sort of trauma or trauma related disorder?,3.60409549071618,5.8364105448275865,4.62896551724138,81.74143236074272,74.58620689655173,7.220159151193633,24.257294429708228,8.139509932561175,1.588336870026525,599,19,108,10,13,195,96,145,0.184,0.669,0.147,-0.6484,0,0,1,0,1,0,14.0,3,0,0,5,7,14,2,2,5,0,19,3,2,0,2,29,23,16,0,5,4,5,2,2,0,3,1,5,0,0,4,13,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,7,0,1,9,7,14,7,11,9,2,15,0,0,0,0,14,9,1,6,8,77,18,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22334644052571445,0.11619495710133047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09764230013340353,0.0,0.0,0.12431272607787845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08512565876445541,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15511295339175715,0.0,0.0,0.14259209105916806,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11149433503695083,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16004407047348154,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1263159519531928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164389266395354,0.0,0.07060817941698902,0.09976166926603483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11168602743288046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12348668811614692,0.0,0.12509355470138947,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09360039938555892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13644596532819414,0.27991985713924883,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11872029672101443,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3270986244181434,0.111462472501472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10770202677759144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13362040548887108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789189865635692,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1192551744630222,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23102984502949586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10750473885038424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.31992335700697544,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09277323860744224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08142751307549144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14537428183513165,0.3359489676198039,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10166246230165088,0.0,0.0,0.2975971768906461,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,unlucky311,2020/04/20,"Combatting burnout during quarantine As the title suggests, I'm feeling extremely burnt out at the moment. I work at least 50 hours a week, usually about 7-5:30 in the commerical maintenance sector, which means I still have to go to work as I have not been told to stay at home by the UK government. I have suffered from anxiety and depression for as long as I can remember, but pre corrona virus I found ways to cope with it pretty well, favorite activities included gokarting and playing music casually with my band, however since neither of those can be done anymore, and the only thing I seem to do nowdays is work, eat and sleep, I'm exhausted. I coped with the hours before but now I find it so hard to even get out of bed in the morning.
Does anyone have any suggestions as to how I can reduce burnout during this time until things (eventually) go back to normal?",10.10916883116883,7.603716800000001,9.836796536796543,66.5209090909091,59.78787878787879,13.549783549783552,41.753246753246756,12.031772070788634,4.960506493506493,692,30,124,17,7,227,113,165,0.068,0.8340000000000001,0.098,0.727,1,1,0,0,0,0,18.0,0,0,0,5,8,6,0,0,8,0,12,3,1,1,0,20,22,14,0,1,3,0,2,0,0,0,1,0,2,0,7,9,1,0,6,3,0,2,2,3,1,0,4,2,11,3,30,17,2,22,0,2,0,0,4,7,0,1,11,84,18,7,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10943002436039474,0.0,0.1231021290598184,0.0,0.15958780432618827,0.11251788088977173,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12373631017938545,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13692969898398008,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13859877482017507,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14082076882908467,0.16467538419720082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16465968784547705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10628507994148602,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08136517380919953,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14707649456684474,0.0,0.0,0.1764387104517492,0.0,0.0,0.08407321790753727,0.0,0.1829072605332446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1441512712086749,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16141426717825708,0.0,0.31694440221139203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14240771268875918,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17528730320829747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15766585748004128,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12238568801142168,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16371185538189773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18228916842652446,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14649405996772144,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13311335635014565,0.0,0.16103460485789742,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1715175944870734,0.1285096353346583,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21381405798775285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09383280816675607,0.0,0.0,0.15376441910356087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.177228873880203,0.0,0.0,0.127729529054015,0.12907902722962414,0.0,0.14468495949842347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35145151666613045,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,MarleyBobbins,2020/04/20,"My anxiety/depression is annoying my friends. What do I do? I'm a socially anxious extrovert who is normally home just enough to sleep and clean. I live alone, I have no pets and my normal tricks to relive anxiety/depression will violate isolation restriction laws / are closed. I'm not ok. I'm crying myself to sleep most nights. Crying while working (wfh). Crying while not working.

My mental health has been declining over the last few years related to work, and then also included the breakdown of a romantic relationship. Right now my closest friends are my work friends but they're so annoyed with me.

1. I'm very open and started leaning on them more with the breakdown of my relationship, one friend saw me a little bit like a project to fix, but after years of their ""fixing"" I'm still not ok.
2. Over the last few years I've felt unfairly treated at work, they think I should just stop focusing on that and move on but I'm not and they don't agree with other things I feel about work. They also don't think I do enough to fix my own problems. 
3. I have a tendency to bury my head in the sand and so things that are stressful or overwhelming I procrastinate like mad, which is now starting to affect my deliverables and how I communicate with the customer, which might affect them later. 
4. With some of the work stuff I've found myself putting others down to bring myself up and I cringe afterwards every-time. I feel super shitty about it but it feels like a self defense mechanism, an automatic reflex that I struggle to control. Years ago I took the fall for a lot of shitty work by my friends and colleagues and I'm still paying for it.

My friends aren't perfect but they're genuinely nice people who care. They're right to be annoyed with me but I don't have the energy to fix it. I don't know what to do. I have to just try harder but i'm already trying pretty hard. It feels hopeless. I feel so alone. I'm not a nice person and everyone is finding out right now. I don't have anyone to lean on. I can't find my mental health plan to go see a therapist. The wait is 3 months and I've never had much success talking to therapists anyway.",2.6483385939741773,4.933472411764708,3.8343299856528006,86.03507030129127,77.82352941176471,7.158106169296987,25.18938307030129,8.176038313617813,1.6678883787661407,1705,63,334,32,41,554,205,425,0.172,0.706,0.121,-0.961,0,3,0,0,0,1,47.0,0,0,6,13,17,30,7,3,20,2,31,5,3,4,2,69,59,30,0,4,16,0,8,3,6,3,2,0,3,2,19,22,0,5,12,0,1,7,14,12,0,1,6,10,44,18,45,49,11,49,0,2,2,0,20,18,0,5,27,216,63,12,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06599089964978208,0.0,0.0,0.1542049008884309,0.08215178283829082,0.11906709680053998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08410153123235765,0.0,0.05205359518802274,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08127453440405627,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07590152272045869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08349626977322078,0.0,0.0,0.24532263466988516,0.0,0.0,0.12823854237199986,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15384293512331013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07113527879341547,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1882078557814445,0.05318344139948288,0.07147876503179375,0.0,0.13608255415609966,0.0,0.0,0.08162497495264323,0.34509560531172656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.042308744270055015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06668799534792291,0.0,0.07640193033770598,0.15826286513606666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07467429047565834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040912962417705284,0.1213650361562281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10911003276032566,0.07461333309799263,0.06573619818987247,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06329037986276917,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1500458708327897,0.07897425956816152,0.0,0.0,0.05942119772189657,0.07912313231419286,0.05472555691368116,0.0,0.05741648542845435,0.0,0.0,0.06986148243183901,0.1458803641756927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05044578137041943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051610710434377635,0.06500240294088777,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07573721243362029,0.0,0.07123370185538767,0.0,0.07483767219805047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15985189458499818,0.0,0.1907265775312744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059322935692517814,0.0,0.07766225187512853,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14899729831826553,0.07588718616334325,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10538494688625584,0.0,0.11890356417259572,0.06223925807788532,0.08527636533593556,0.07782595851554196,0.08522158363305675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059835979406712377,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17287250086060446,0.09891574860804764,0.09540255393163516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08271100747616769,0.10108638174261313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06142482741024183,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4335741088636968,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19176026312860767
mentalhealth,bighom6ie,2020/04/20,"Helping someone severely depressed? This is going to be a weird one, but I really, really need advice on this situation. Recently, this kid from high school I used to talk to reached out after not speaking for over a year. I never really knew him well at all but we had hooked up once and were kind of talking for the few months before that. It always felt like he took it more seriously than I did. After it happened, we never spoke again. 

Until last week when he randomly snapchatted me saying that I ruined his life and I was a bitch. I never answered and just blocked him, but the next day he DMed me on Instagram apologizing and saying that I didn’t do/wasn’t any of those things he said, he’s just really depressed and his family is fucked. I know this is bad, but I just ignored it because I haven’t talked to him since high school and I’m 20 now, a sophomore in college. He kept DMing me since then saying that he just wanted to talk to someone. Then tonight he texts me asking if he should kill himself. 

Now this is where I’m conflicted. Obviously, I don’t want him to do that, but I just feel like he’s forcing his problems on me when I genuinely don’t feel like I know him well enough at all for them to 1) be my problem, as awful as it sounds, and 2) even be able to help him. I would just feel HORRIBLY if he hurt himself but I don’t think I can deal with this since I’m the only person he has talked to within this year that wasn’t his “dysfunctional” family. I’m rambling, but it’s making me nervous that I’m the only person in his life that can apparently help him and if he does something to himself, it’ll be my fault. 

Help please! Urgent! Thank you!",2.9859433551198293,4.4697505529411785,4.314052287581699,86.56175381263618,74.3529411764706,7.272331154684098,24.06318082788671,7.921354282810032,1.1739226579520698,1308,39,273,19,27,432,167,340,0.195,0.701,0.10300000000000001,-0.9913,1,0,1,0,0,0,35.0,2,1,1,0,15,22,3,1,8,1,25,3,0,2,6,58,52,25,1,10,17,0,4,3,0,3,2,7,0,3,24,12,0,4,9,0,0,2,10,15,2,1,12,11,45,7,35,33,5,38,0,4,0,1,53,14,2,4,25,181,69,3,0.09053693259201996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08847164269384115,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07533398067901284,0.0,0.0,0.06156821880628102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08463981038601512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07559455698413588,0.055190473774668604,0.0,0.07704026127563471,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05838883158829571,0.09333960203900313,0.15595865475287976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07922947982889884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0935488534151678,0.0,0.05979879010288175,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1707003249342008,0.0,0.13733458034691634,0.12935920546774712,0.0869296533753317,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08369993528862685,0.0,0.0,0.05145422521647528,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08006151048831169,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427399899191956,0.19131448021199746,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09692165886913608,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1001657017505247,0.09428028309603684,0.09951346081447099,0.07379968386591998,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12789782596987265,0.13269531620205405,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060434105535976564,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07226571582222946,0.0,0.0,0.06713198832767542,0.20948299151944932,0.0,0.09628705493071946,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09641887840467102,0.06135016863858483,0.13771483397332718,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15810671473413435,0.0,0.09938236425544417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17326323442147412,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23200110939641014,0.0,0.08939429847768805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08612135564395965,0.21599580805069213,0.0,0.183256418638538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10228096351569012,0.0,0.2246792586688956,0.10176730558220448,0.0,0.0,0.15342329836353466,0.06969975394366262,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3638507846970605,0.0,0.08335424351021893,0.0,0.0,0.06014871504868841,0.05801241068385533,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10058986339550773,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07819484079677277,0.0,0.0,0.10680205714762307,0.0,0.07262326622173054,0.0,0.16280715089744335,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0643148392818733,0.0,0.0,0.11660563243865232
mentalhealth,Pythag0ras2000,2020/04/20,"I just saw a video of someone getting beheaded on Instagram. I'm scared and it's running through my head. What should I do? I was on Instagram and I saw a video from an online ""friend"" I guess of mine had posted a video. I checked it out and it was a video of someone getting beheaded. They've posted other things like this, so I reported their account. Does anyone have advice on how I should ""deal""  with seeing this?",1.737376171352075,4.156132831325301,3.0765461847389592,89.43107095046857,82.13253012048195,6.098527443105756,24.88487282463186,7.3871296695380915,1.3032206157965187,327,13,65,5,9,106,52,83,0.045,0.92,0.035,-0.1926,0,0,0,0,0,0,12.0,0,0,1,0,3,3,0,1,5,0,7,1,1,1,0,10,14,5,0,2,1,0,0,1,1,2,0,0,0,0,8,5,0,0,0,4,2,1,0,1,0,0,5,3,11,2,10,7,0,7,0,0,3,0,3,4,0,1,1,47,19,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2436427571874897,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17433759569102755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25704866896462497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21819069170948396,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19263202953376227,0.0,0.2605296608166085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2746655182445705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25588489696277184,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12181022725068365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4775791566796408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24962320179870195,0.0,0.19868402827143605,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4225136359166151,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16564402253115704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,matttyb1738,2020/04/20,"Can't seem to read my own thoughts lately. I'm having trouble being able to tell others what I'm thinking. Like I just genuinely don't know. Like I used to but now I can't. I seem to just feel like I'm floating through everything. I can barely concentrate on schoolwork or complex tasks but I can still do things on my own and function alright. Feels like I'm in a cloud. Is this a possible problem with my anxiety meds, or is it something medication or therapy could help?",1.5794449760765588,4.107024915789477,3.1802870813397126,87.64382775119617,84.05263157894737,6.401913875598087,27.583732057416267,7.686295010490155,1.9051052631578949,377,18,74,7,11,124,61,95,0.079,0.7509999999999999,0.17,0.8225,0,0,1,0,0,0,9.0,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,0,2,1,11,1,0,1,0,20,23,6,0,2,7,0,2,4,0,0,1,0,0,0,5,2,0,0,8,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,2,9,5,9,20,2,6,0,0,0,0,2,3,0,5,7,48,14,1,0.19529803558701936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14940246266983942,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15592958987044556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17552128149558271,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1974971096843816,0.27904191129151856,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090415654807114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1073306928737556,0.0,0.22030469072582567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.381651021211996,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2169320907466232,0.1967422244585127,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2201691910553022,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18687384448095196,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1953508860090569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35558399343435376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15034996919362956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15596526349655068,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1706990912124204,0.0,0.22334032408632856,0.0,0.12974733686888376,0.12513909541511212,0.0,0.15504482525382715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16867479782494282,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,flypdive,2020/04/20,"Research Material on Delusional disorder Hi, please share authors and titles on delusional disorder. I am writing my experience with the illness in a book and would like to understand the psychology, biological and neurology or anything else that is related to the illness. Thanks",8.477666666666668,11.883114044444444,9.775277777777776,45.01625000000002,64.1111111111111,14.277777777777779,49.02777777777778,12.602617957971056,8.673777777777778,232,17,27,11,4,80,36,45,0.19399999999999998,0.628,0.17800000000000002,-0.2263,0,0,0,0,0,0,4.0,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,0,4,0,3,3,0,0,0,8,5,4,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,1,3,0,0,0,1,4,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,3,6,4,0,3,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,1,20,3,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.243028255244025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6769386997519159,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2467071000717404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28888564003207884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14428143773525062,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.32417942420371365,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2718966374821241,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30744493386010363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20979122123279464,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,tessaract-Kicker,2020/04/20,"Having trouble leaving bed Im not sure if this is the right subreddit to go to but i’ll try. Ever since quarantine happened i have been having too much trouble getting out of bed. From what it seems like i dont want to do things, like eat, or interact with my family. Is there any advice on how to overcome this?",3.074062500000004,4.48836703125,4.52075,85.44925000000002,74.0,7.620000000000001,26.8625,8.238735603445708,1.7437537499999998,246,9,50,4,5,82,51,64,0.121,0.7829999999999999,0.096,0.0736,0,1,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,4,5,0,0,1,0,8,1,0,1,2,11,13,4,0,2,4,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,2,0,5,2,1,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,0,3,3,9,12,1,5,0,0,0,0,1,3,0,3,3,35,8,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2515827936197534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17507874855537978,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30173623884104483,0.0,0.0,0.2634415212278731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23288347882513386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2427063820175652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1345100109801554,0.0,0.14631804417034927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22766728249603085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2780964055467836,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2726084811784721,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25155976411481473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18925961032150845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2198658163708268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23437805885409296,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21297006906474336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2426490114006101,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17104217016692685,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17479556441604152,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15185408049061835,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,crabcrown,2020/04/20,"How do I talk to my university professors about how my mental health effects my work? WARNING: self harm mentioned

Some context: I was diagnosed with anxiety (but also displayed symptoms of depression) when I was 15 and never really got any better at dealing with it, but got ""discharged"" (can't think of a better way to put it, but basically my therapist thought I was ready to stop going to therapy and 15 year old me hated confrontation/inconveniencing people so didn't ask to keep going) after going to therapy throughout the summer holidays. Admittedly I was ""better"" but it was mostly because I'd just spent 3 months away from the main source of my anxiety which was school. 

Now I am in my first year of uni and because of a nationwide lockdown all my classes have moved online and students, like me, who lived on campus have had to leave as well. During the lock down my mental health has really deteriorated and I'm struggling to find the motivation to function, I barely eat and I'm pretty sure the only reason I haven't started self harming again is because I've moved back in with my parents and they would notice. I have been trying to think of a way to reach out to my professors about work due over the next two weeks (two 500 word essays, a 1500 word essay and a quiz) for a while now but I have no clue how to start. And to top it off apparently there was an error with my school email, meaning I've missed about a weeks worth of updates (mostly resources we were supposed to read) and the first lecture (classes started online today).

So now I have 3 professors to email and attempt to explain this too, while also asking for help/extensions on my essays and I don't know where to start. Any advice would be appreciated.",7.984840945441621,7.247081719033236,8.18842367158344,71.03489070552695,62.62537764350454,10.688537408921274,35.180558023813745,9.916854025145753,3.4105729873822628,1383,52,244,24,17,454,182,331,0.08800000000000001,0.7879999999999999,0.124,0.93,2,1,0,0,0,0,35.0,1,0,1,11,21,12,1,1,15,0,26,5,0,6,3,50,50,28,0,2,6,1,0,1,0,2,4,0,0,2,7,18,1,2,11,2,2,6,6,6,1,4,15,0,28,6,47,32,5,48,0,2,0,0,15,12,0,3,29,171,35,15,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0913320825194316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.149486488823618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1271176496642834,0.0,0.1429996329272219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17475272101266667,0.0,0.08781264255080584,0.07186815967586926,0.0,0.17092462912160186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2479843276291273,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09635743133263412,0.08050053266672949,0.09486414157624326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09563715550513524,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08542453691057378,0.15900111100872882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15935348549049885,0.0,0.1495036325835457,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09227649500256974,0.0,0.1986960348918921,0.0,0.0,0.06264704744656363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08307522807565894,0.0,0.0,0.051365450771347514,0.0,0.0,0.09896503628193368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.045661861059998685,0.0,0.08253055394874584,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10180985579627536,0.0,0.0,0.1883797539033817,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07460219025933287,0.19867519326836566,0.0,0.0,0.07208531187814385,0.0,0.0994001804275044,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10640955058452506,0.09807489968319484,0.0,0.0,0.07108369528147875,0.0,0.0,0.10378087426245912,0.0,0.0,0.06479627114325164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09508663824193468,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09395728248384336,0.0,0.0,0.09348943950487536,0.0,0.1197510514262649,0.09609670932087344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1891814127067813,0.0,0.0,0.1950069777278009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26461761659109195,0.0,0.0,0.07814021175502353,0.0,0.09770901945572726,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08808885223682868,0.09714503528642306,0.0,0.0751229408223144,0.0,0.0,0.2137687946467776,0.10851907815935108,0.0,0.11977610267878233,0.0,0.07420009249632797,0.0,0.0,0.08859308267102388,0.0,0.0,0.06345602051547873,0.0,0.18260178106353714,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14837497863108048,0.14994260175199575,0.0,0.08403549254745539,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13608602401601766,0.0,0.0,0.13278849650940064,0.0,0.0,0.12037569236700606
mentalhealth,Havehope3,2020/04/20,"Trauma? I don't know if im suffering from some type of trauma or not but i've come to realize that i dont like to express my feelings too much. I dont like crying in public because i guess it makes me seem weak and i dont truly express how i feel if someone made me really upset. Growing up i had older siblings that would sometimes make fun of me when i'd cry about something they view as ""stupid"" i was very sensitive when i was little and i guess their teasing got to me. Most people usually sees me as a calm and laid back person on the outside but i feel like somethings wrong with me because i just cant fully express myself. Sorry about the long post.",2.1019565217391296,3.824956949275364,3.858768115942031,87.87989130434786,77.33333333333333,6.049275362318841,24.54347826086957,6.816661863887847,0.9288869565217396,521,18,106,5,12,175,92,138,0.243,0.669,0.08800000000000001,-0.9640000000000001,0,0,2,0,0,0,8.0,0,0,2,0,8,13,2,1,3,0,9,1,0,4,0,27,22,13,0,3,7,0,3,3,0,1,1,0,0,1,3,5,0,0,6,0,0,2,6,8,0,0,5,5,22,5,14,16,3,13,0,1,2,0,8,4,0,8,9,69,25,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1088705290866751,0.0,0.17261844364587345,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12196339285262765,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3110501014927653,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4978115420874349,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21476968665853974,0.10114872727074788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132388783374926,0.0,0.3119448363166599,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1529366630780548,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07781170169757137,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20751460709881508,0.14190589179066748,0.0,0.12529873409003112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13397164704463993,0.18901887458590452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10408165183262376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09815757567781548,0.12362701912469785,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13559979498957725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09070331274838928,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11282533219674165,0.12889414427841922,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11996495577596107,0.2179989086047235,0.14003170444760835,0.15849340333545733,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15593645261282307,0.11682288606904105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10057829459390356,0.15480154499794127,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LolaRose1997,2020/04/20,"I got triggered and went into a coma-like state I don’t know where else to post this and I’m still a little bit shaken up so sorry if this is messy.

This evening I was watching a tv show that is usually quite lighthearted, and then suddenly a scene happened that seriously triggered me. I didn’t realise it at first it took about 10 or so minutes to kick in, and then I just sort of faded out of reality. I couldn’t focus on the screen I kept looking “through” it and I had to go over to the couch to lie down.

I can’t really explain what happened next, but it felt like I took a load of drugs or something; my thoughts were erratic and non-sensical, I couldn’t move any part of my body except for my eyes and the lighting and shapes in the room kept morphing and changing. It felt like I couldn’t feel anything, and even though my hand was rested on my stomach I couldn’t actually feel it there, nor could I feel my other hand covering my face. 
I thought maybe this had lasted 15 minutes tops, but then I got a snapchat from my brother and my screen lit up on my chest and i could see from the time that I’d actually been there for over an hour, completely unable to move, speak or form a coherent thought. 

This freaked me out and I somehow mustered the strength to move my fingers to lift my phone, but it fell onto the couch beside me, and by the time I was able to move that hand to grab it another 30 minutes had passed. Luckily my housemate came downstairs and I could communicate with her by typing on my phone, but my right thumb was the only thing I could move and I didn’t even have the strength to press the home button (Still got the IPhone 6) and I kept “slipping” from reality. My lips were glued shut and it felt like my jaw had been wired closed. Even moving my eyes to look at her was exhausting. 

It took maybe 40 minutes to get me out of this state but I’m still zoning in and out and I look and feel like I haven’t slept in a week. This was a terrifying experience and I have no idea what it actually was. For context, I have been battling depression and anxiety this past year and am on antidepressants, but I finished CBT last week because I’d made so much improvement and was starting to be happy again. That’s why this was such a shock. 

Does anyone have any insight into what could have happened to me? And why did I go into a coma-like state after being triggered? 

Sorry this is so long but I would appreciate any insight whatsoever x thank you for reading",4.756479083665337,5.2117771653386455,5.36039591633466,84.57234686254981,69.1792828685259,8.506075697211157,29.63172310756972,8.472884824447931,1.9455396414342645,1955,70,413,28,32,631,227,502,0.066,0.812,0.122,0.9884,1,0,2,0,0,0,37.0,0,1,0,5,20,14,1,0,24,0,45,15,13,4,0,83,84,46,0,11,13,1,13,4,0,1,2,1,4,0,31,36,0,3,15,3,0,15,11,6,0,1,40,25,56,8,58,32,5,76,0,1,10,0,8,32,0,6,29,280,87,2,0.07190140394702263,0.0,0.2104961950502456,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1466862608645284,0.07539489123735263,0.055004377216675324,0.0,0.0,0.05027513343067015,0.0,0.059168729051742634,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04383042848140158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07849771080979454,0.07986625077391123,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08223605136282405,0.0,0.0,0.07606215159001566,0.0,0.0753872540569969,0.0,0.0,0.2870371019060485,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06192857386141131,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06292140312905027,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08338280139358713,0.0,0.06006439681109815,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18996079675487013,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07033336985789668,0.0,0.0,0.1454220409243071,0.0513663773463328,0.20710987030497094,0.0,0.0,0.061159297466488224,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.037565515941310926,0.0,0.0817264496631943,0.0,0.17251836316406002,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1907465221569571,0.07654038150277925,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07212297064100158,0.0,0.07080839945293628,0.0,0.0,0.0811679331872205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03951513122512256,0.11721848153874358,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14050957635326736,0.07206409593149,0.0,0.06363047988788363,0.1811372114525378,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06803484691788947,0.0,0.0,0.1444692489406563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.458518880801215,0.052855804982632995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07646795880130176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054684257703060936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07786221373396088,0.06863802588087277,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0688616695974418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07647599361641072,0.07192086148806892,0.0,0.04606188050913429,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.061403406108160676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05729610983962637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0553532135431888,0.0,0.16097547012809638,0.05089218378819777,0.0,0.17226166221276631,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06619715249614054,0.0,0.0,0.0477680978777858,0.0,0.07064276431458212,0.17124504980753508,0.08385257371456542,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2396553161426759,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0791892382938096,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1153499384409465,0.0,0.0,0.06665332180823116,0.12975966702843342,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.051076694411904634,0.0,0.0,0.04630214676175462
mentalhealth,MASrocks1,2020/04/20,"Can't get motivated I've struggled with this for years now but I can't get motivated with anything and I don't know why. I've spent years being yelled at by parents and teachers that I need to try harder but I just can't do it. I think about how psychopaths are incapable of having empathy. I feel like that almost, like the part of my brain that's supposed to be motivated is just missing.",2.712160714285716,4.615226037500001,4.207142857142859,85.25500000000002,76.125,7.071428571428572,26.42857142857143,7.957251820313856,1.5747321428571426,313,12,64,5,7,104,53,80,0.19699999999999998,0.723,0.08,-0.8215,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,3,5,4,0,1,1,0,10,1,1,4,0,17,18,5,0,1,4,1,1,2,0,0,0,1,0,0,5,4,0,0,6,0,1,0,4,2,0,0,1,2,7,2,10,15,1,4,0,1,0,0,1,1,0,1,5,42,12,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2732073512206536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22452202038768732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3045768897640892,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13795484101354366,0.19491516898579225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2850926721333927,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1499443581218483,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26658924800518824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2023055537783673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3029537625568558,0.2954564314558648,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2852290009139126,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17482325731408607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1852387572244932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24619341223790744,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3513968174014778
mentalhealth,ultrasupersnail420,2020/04/20,My personality seems to be gone completely For some reason for about a year or so I've completely lost the ability to be funny and I feel like I've gotten much less intelligent. Humor has always been one of my only positive character traits so for that to be stripped away from me without any discernible cause has done a number on my mental health and caused me great distress. I was wondering if anybody can offer me some advice or some insight on how something like this can even happen.,7.976129032258066,7.708491129032258,8.031741935483872,70.60761290322583,62.44086021505376,10.880860215053763,34.72903225806452,10.355215969177356,3.6004038709677424,397,15,68,8,5,129,68,93,0.059000000000000004,0.715,0.226,0.9407,0,0,1,0,0,0,3.0,0,0,0,1,5,6,0,1,3,0,10,1,0,4,0,18,17,8,0,1,4,0,1,2,0,0,1,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,6,0,0,1,1,2,0,1,6,1,8,4,13,8,5,5,0,1,0,0,2,3,0,8,3,51,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18638112871143306,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1587043251572533,0.0,0.0,0.12970431840603727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17919901728147586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.39186866125694797,0.0,0.0,0.3999578016238087,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19518508371346585,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12597670457552204,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09643984338479693,0.13625899774307731,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21028273240731432,0.0,0.0,0.16866370100973085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2027392249911636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1863640676673832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2082065376620417,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.192213021921537,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14020998528430004,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12924495724653476,0.14506030076258056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16653984854209056,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1961042894742738,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17363527340603727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.146834832217186,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18385886712473992,0.20684074650607107,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12282517158200923
mentalhealth,tyannalien,2020/04/20,"Why does my existence feel physically painful in a way I don't know how to explain?(F/25/CAN) There's just a constant deep emptiness in my chest that is painful in a way people can't seem to relate to. The current world issues absolutely aren't helping.
If you have any tips to combat these feelings, I'd greatly appreciate it",4.6819047619047645,6.583705761904763,5.2446349206349225,79.90314285714291,70.74603174603175,7.5796825396825405,33.234920634920634,8.238735603445708,2.6452120634920635,265,13,48,4,5,85,50,63,0.21,0.743,0.047,-0.8509,1,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,1,0,0,3,3,0,0,4,0,5,3,1,1,0,7,9,2,0,1,2,0,2,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,4,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,0,2,4,1,7,9,0,9,0,0,0,0,2,5,0,2,2,27,7,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17191181464539104,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2731856336854281,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2212258843097615,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25564528126961805,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27871150753489426,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1694456692230784,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.263856209387046,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13893157835283565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5379913741520219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.175258818644143,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2301384819296122,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.40131975208486026,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2281115459808618,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ellieterrestrial,2020/04/20,"Explosions in chest I struggle with a lot of intrusive thoughts and impulses. Normally I don't follow through with them (except for sh) just for the good of the people around me, but I've noticed that they kind of build up in my chest to the point where I can feel the physical energy vestering and building up inside of me. I feel like I'm exploding from the inside. I don't have any way to relieve it because everything I can think of is violent. do any of you experience this kind of sensation and do you know of any ways to use this energy?",8.137155963302753,6.1456109724770664,8.609247706422018,72.16671559633028,63.12844036697248,13.123669724770643,38.313761467889904,11.979248473330829,4.4620700917431195,432,18,86,12,5,145,68,109,0.063,0.8140000000000001,0.12300000000000001,0.6956,0,0,0,0,0,0,8.0,0,2,2,0,3,7,1,1,6,0,8,2,2,1,0,17,16,4,0,1,3,0,2,1,0,0,0,0,0,0,4,6,0,0,5,0,0,1,2,2,0,0,1,2,13,5,23,15,1,10,0,0,0,0,4,7,0,1,1,61,17,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4167939325044015,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1818707134983021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1245396572415727,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18361206986694054,0.19984504095058106,0.0,0.0,0.20660089074611795,0.14595228132821134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17135752334849697,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4254949573130159,0.11227818365318347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09981087959030452,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1736889355789238,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20017106257286732,0.0,0.23259741486872176,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14163620726018644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19312995970379715,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21357918729961187,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13090747819673115,0.0,0.1621917356370814,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17644999226948385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3243283734515661,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,PepperoniTonie,2020/04/20,"I have people I care about I have more people I care about than I ever have all thanks to the new job I started around 8 months ago. I was very depressed and had more suicidal thoughts than ever before this job. I’ve had a lot of shitty things happen in my life that would take too long to talk about but the main thing was my mom dying unexpectedly 4 years ago and a job that was terrible. I worked at a spectrum call center for billing for 2 years. I got screamed at 80-100 calls a day. If a customer was upset over something completely out of my control (like pricing or technical issues) I would still get in trouble and a bad rating because I couldn’t make them happy WHICH WAS NOT POSSIBLE. Around the end of me working there I cried all the time and even thought of hurting myself to get to be able to leave work. It was just horrible. I had no friends I was close too as I don’t make friends easy. I have a very very dark perverted sense of humor and I’m a girl so I mainly end up being friends with guys. I’m very uncomfortable about emotional things like saying I love you and I don’t like hugs or people touching me. After starting this new job, I have become very good friends with 2 of the guys which ended up letting me become friends with their friends and now I have a group of about 6 guys I’m super close with now and it feels amazing. Especially one guy. He’s 50 years old but definitely has the mentality of a 12 year old and we are literally the same. He has even said that we are kindred spirits. I feel comfortable telling him how much I love him and how much he means to me. We joke around constantly and always laugh non stop around each other. He’s fixed a bunch of things around my house. He reminds me of my dad so much I really wish he’d adopt me lmao. I love his family and he invites me for dinner and I went to his families Christmas party. I just love all of these guys so much and I’ve never been this close to this many people. It feels amazing and my new job is amazing and I haven’t had a suicidal thought in about 5 months now and that’s the longest I think in my entire life. It’s really weird when I think about it because I’ve never been so content with my life before. I’m still depressed definitely but nowhere near what I was and I’m excited every day to go to work and see them and to come home and play Xbox with them every night for hours. Just Saturday me and the one guy stayed up till 2 am playing modern warfare drunk as hell. I just love them all so much and I never thought having friend like this could help my mental health so much and it feels amazing.",2.4751129463201385,4.220570636871512,3.4875933122824065,90.85078273014334,76.33705772811919,6.457274714598008,23.591976358189626,7.255503002510835,0.7776790057485226,2060,64,445,24,46,661,240,537,0.129,0.618,0.253,0.9981,5,0,1,0,0,1,30.0,3,1,5,6,37,44,1,1,21,0,38,12,0,5,9,88,77,42,3,6,11,2,5,4,7,2,4,3,1,7,24,44,2,2,11,5,2,3,9,10,0,2,21,9,65,34,62,48,18,66,2,3,1,6,49,21,1,4,45,289,89,9,0.05368128287560656,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09517043665191473,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.044667127670415606,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23893861426084295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0448216289324478,0.06544722357863196,0.11857351882381625,0.09135763582766893,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10962918348645714,0.0,0.10946329112328043,0.0,0.0,0.04624167193170765,0.05628380376592696,0.058010396163407925,0.06020812335712512,0.042860136290428986,0.0,0.05896636856000246,0.06923997302607363,0.0,0.09247122056161117,0.0,0.05571269644332029,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.060384217931914376,0.14263704953664474,0.0,0.0,0.07091196211820318,0.09711558734486148,0.09045759215488848,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1012118719665842,0.0,0.10857147825594053,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2903181819125976,0.0,0.056092509378521616,0.0,0.03050831014385653,0.04502531318484343,0.0429338257941393,0.0,0.0,0.3189174588367292,0.047470181161739684,0.0571447238204822,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05706069344681335,0.0,0.0,0.035981432358640444,0.0,0.053846703628503946,0.0,0.05286525036149056,0.06194099305144723,0.05746692358103729,0.0,0.0,0.056029312486991535,0.2663519504810397,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05684072759991054,0.0,0.054892748758496736,0.11375003291754415,0.10490385306674836,0.0,0.0,0.04750624609345363,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04563790703999885,0.24224726826224366,0.0,0.0716653463229207,0.05442439522535267,0.0,0.0584746542588666,0.0,0.0,0.10819621433226324,0.0,0.0,0.06287086970978037,0.0856957756839936,0.0,0.23677151736685464,0.0,0.12420694409935228,0.15553715253152162,0.0,0.050376247508925616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11265895242840822,0.0,0.07275165311806286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14886336976833356,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06051758068128105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06877920879584205,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05106319290478811,0.04268951075160979,0.0,0.0,0.04277703231273512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04132647418783562,0.0,0.0,0.07599177663080192,0.057217105023436424,0.08573988369479872,0.044879956172738114,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11743722128227725,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.040361644004372726,0.04314698176455758,0.046919807331599984,0.049422512964048086,0.0,0.0,0.1426538361613321,0.06879359702297637,0.0,0.17046776938298866,0.031301987738207665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22146340165558415,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.049763087035446615,0.0,0.0,0.06173082605485392,0.0,0.0,0.1563224530977397,0.0,0.0,0.07626728632716502,0.0,0.0,0.13827594464758844
mentalhealth,Dying_rn,2020/04/20,"I need help This is my first post on Reddit and will probably be my last, I'm a bit nervous but I think it's about time I post. I'm 14 and have been having really intense mood swings I could be happy for a minute and then crying the next all it really takes is one tiny thing to ruin my day, today I was in the middle of watching something and got an ad I almost threw my phone across the room in a fit of anger and started crying. I feel pretty embarrassed to talk about this but at this point I couldn't care less.",1.305135135135135,2.987185684684686,2.984045045045047,93.4387702702703,79.54054054054055,5.881441441441443,17.406306306306305,6.742157984588678,-0.21412504504504515,405,7,92,4,10,134,76,111,0.21100000000000002,0.6609999999999999,0.129,-0.9091,0,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,1,2,7,1,2,7,0,11,0,0,0,1,14,21,8,0,3,2,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,6,5,0,0,2,0,0,1,1,4,0,2,4,2,12,2,12,12,3,20,0,1,1,0,3,9,0,1,8,60,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18952017134736174,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20662684873065185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19296686924857512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15111159605491434,0.0,0.4157943878799134,0.12205937428511708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09569737047803252,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16098753423143392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15137140247369713,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20147463750736286,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12685941162698242,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1542751069010828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14033657237002128,0.0,0.0,0.20128400169864333,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12824992370309993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1789152915791971,0.0,0.3625244517442757,0.19254913795017528,0.20405818795069486,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2424942362783576,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1457043774086318,0.0,0.0,0.13396176082964673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14230268433054438,0.15212292455660134,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12573833596574982,0.12127248236051412,0.0,0.0,0.11036113592266354,0.0,0.17939977700390705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,jschill98,2020/04/20,"ECT experiences? So I (21f) was diagnosed with Bipolar 1, PTSD and ADHD just under a year ago. I've been in therapy for 3 years (CBT, EMDR), done residential treatment, seen 6 different psychiatrist and had 7 hospitalizations in the last year, all but one being for suicide attempts/suicidal ideation. I've been on 20+ medications (antidepressants, antipsychotics, mood stabilizers, anticonvulsants etc.) over the last year, and none have seemed to work. I struggle mostly with being depressed/suicidal and not so much the mania. Should I consider ECT? I'm just feeling really hopeless and could use some advice?",6.7447464940668835,9.643092320388352,7.3179935275080945,62.980053937432615,67.54368932038835,10.791370010787489,34.745415318230854,10.746095033038511,4.812394606256743,491,24,71,16,9,161,79,103,0.139,0.8440000000000001,0.017,-0.9374,1,0,0,0,0,2,26.0,0,0,0,1,4,3,0,1,4,0,10,3,0,1,1,19,15,8,1,2,4,0,1,0,0,1,3,0,0,0,0,7,0,0,2,0,0,0,2,2,0,1,6,2,3,0,10,5,6,12,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,3,7,45,3,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1954590705968466,0.1589278086379582,0.14416862642987385,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298530761225423,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16507397754590464,0.0,0.16992192035335005,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16643497036347055,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1813841757693569,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15909100895782013,0.0,0.0,0.08223457535909574,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.26514308263886743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16384050692595178,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11955752100253952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11020760510845837,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1901149240810304,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10418996074691804,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1480593754070418,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17002437607790788,0.0,0.5336981781200989,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18599053668332732,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14046686956667326,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1184022798260225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.41893373004157625
mentalhealth,take_the_caique,2020/04/20,"I'm feeling hopeless from school and for my future. As a bit of background I'm in my teens and my mental health has been declining since the last few years. Part of this I feel comes from my grades, but I've been feeling very hopeless about my future as well.

Growing up I've always expected all As from myself which was not difficult to achieve in elementary school. However my new high school is much more difficult and I feel like I'm not good enough compared to my peers.

It's not really because I don't understand the content being taught, I just have very poor self discipline and study skills, and I constantly procrastinate/make excuses so I can do something else more enjoyable. I'll tell myself that I will learn from my experiences and do better the next semester, but I keep on getting worse grades each time. 

I feel like a huge disappointment to myself and my parents, since they expected kind of high of me. Every time I try to go to them for advice, they don't really understand and all they tell me is to study more and work harder. I don't exactly blame them since their school experience and childhood was a lot different from now, and that's probably all they know.

In addition to all of this, I'm growing more and more worried about my future and finding a job/being able to afford things like food and housing. I still have several years (currently in high school) until I really need to care but current events have been making me very worried about what the world will be like by then. 

Any advice? Thanks for your time reading.",7.547613636363637,7.193736276094282,7.303247053872057,75.76375946969699,63.343434343434346,11.061363636363637,33.71401515151516,10.550175099000144,3.3985489898989902,1242,45,232,27,16,394,152,297,0.092,0.7509999999999999,0.157,0.9493,7,0,1,0,0,2,26.0,0,1,7,4,8,16,0,0,8,0,21,2,0,1,5,46,42,23,0,3,7,1,5,4,0,2,1,0,0,1,8,17,1,2,10,1,1,4,6,5,1,0,6,5,37,11,36,32,16,35,0,3,0,0,13,11,0,1,24,151,45,12,0.0889827661232575,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1739058584156265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07404078967532249,0.0,0.0,0.06051133231288346,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05424306832056265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0786980255282328,0.0971461342722264,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0907238604531473,0.0,0.0,0.0766507739426123,0.0,0.09615875847243743,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09296805158245686,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433368307682119,0.0,0.0,0.0919429839980517,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07497181825407806,0.0,0.0,0.1740844394453565,0.0,0.0,0.2249618009244421,0.12713861179610506,0.0,0.0,0.08132863617792803,0.0,0.10759831400344463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04648982267116898,0.0,0.050570956596497255,0.07463452246544462,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0945845193672882,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2820455337062729,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10267416505136884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08830166511127747,0.07909197104148838,0.0,0.09266185788040053,0.048902601160968166,0.07253283076204321,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1738899393387786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07564996570416442,0.0,0.0,0.059396687349777225,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08967369928229231,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06541257158888758,0.0659795935838599,0.0,0.0859401100085541,0.09463418125955643,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09880483137947324,0.0963596644042307,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09593847192552536,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08900684612349688,0.0,0.17101391553751935,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4502765493994681,0.0,0.0,0.09282843148675317,0.10052519778188602,0.0,0.2208223909790753,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06850328066630551,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07106175196975831,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15554971933181058,0.0819233758346328,0.0,0.0,0.059116195905488965,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15565969952076344,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06041345721551941,0.0,0.0,0.1852683953602112,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2202603032425076,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0800061931454148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06478051351736111,0.18073263664884626,0.09068104068998567,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11460396793758475
mentalhealth,RevengeOfPorkins,2020/04/20,"What's your milestone today? I got to thinking about something lately. It's been a little over a decade since my life changed drastically, with the passing of my mother on December 17th, 2009. This, in turn started a journey which I wasn't to emerge until recently. I had to watch for the rest of the school year (I was a senior in HS as the time) my dad mourn his wife. I went to college, only to find it wasn't the ""best time of my life"" like it is for many, but actually some of the worst years of my life. My sophomore year, I finally stepped into the psychiatrist office at our school, feeling better stepping out than I had in a long time. I was terrified to be on medication, but knew I needed to take it (Citalopram, for those curious).

I was suicidal at the time, but luckily I didn't give in to the voices or images in my head. In about a year or so, I got great news from my psychiatrist-I could start coming off the medication. Even though I feared a relapse more than anything, I endured. For a time, I was really happy, though still living in fear of relapse. I started a relationship that would fail in 3 months, then decided to just have fun in my remaining time in college (at this point, a term or so). Then, I met a woman who would make me wonder how my life got to where it was. About a year into the relationship, she told me she was pregnant. Ignoring some warning signs, I got excited and prepped for a baby which wasn't to come, including my brother and his wife buying me a pickup (which I still drive today). Then, under sketchy circumstances I didn't recognize until WAY too late, she told me and the family the baby was stillborn. I wouldn't find out until later that my family knew she lied. After we broke up, she then told me the baby was aborted. A few months later, my dad passed away after a long health struggle. 

A few years later, I am living with one of my best friends, who has this dog. I am left with him one weekend, and this dumb little Boston Terrier shows me just how bitter I had become. I realized the joy of loving on something, and having them love me back. I had allowed my recent past to make me bitter and I hated that. I sought to change it. Soon, I realized that I was living in the past. I was listening to the same songs, going back to the old emotions I once felt. I was analyzing and living in a past which had no more to teach me (mostly of the days during my depression).  I finally realized that it was time I moved on for good, believing that God had finally showed me this door when he knew I needed to go through it. It took some time and was quite difficult, but I eventually walked through it.

This all leads me to today. I live in beautiful SW Washington, I am healthy, am very close with my family (especially my brother), have a job I love, a fulfilling hobby in writing, and amazing friends. I'm finally renting a house, after years of living in apartments. I can easily say that I am the happiest I have been in years--perhaps even the happiest I've been in a decade. It wasn't easy, it wasn't always fun and there are times it's hard to look back and remember those things did actually happen to me. But it was all worth it, in a way--I love who I am, even with my faults. I wouldn't change a minute of my past, because it's made me who I am. I'm looking forward to tomorrow, to the next decade and whatever it brings, because I've already been through so much that I know I am prepared for tomorrow. 

So, the question I pose to you folks: What is your milestone today? Is it a week without the voices? A day you can get out of bed? A year off medication, or finding the medication that works? Let's celebrate what we've accomplished, small or large. Did you just get married? Have a kid? Close on a home? Let's hear it!",4.016423568704667,4.979111194187585,5.287642880287134,82.59242541312533,71.14002642007927,8.619416265795968,28.021460083248176,8.948635820820359,2.1047455895914857,2942,104,601,55,53,982,308,757,0.11,0.741,0.149,0.9897,4,0,2,0,0,0,114.0,2,5,1,8,27,33,4,3,54,0,61,14,1,7,2,83,109,39,2,7,14,7,3,1,2,4,9,6,4,2,48,27,0,1,17,4,3,17,11,15,0,2,48,14,98,18,101,53,17,134,0,4,3,4,48,47,1,11,72,431,146,11,0.0,0.0,0.1038158583484404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.058698932416984914,0.0,0.044260184363535265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.043772661014799166,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04997583736160685,0.12270459088033472,0.0,0.06485096160750757,0.05874662282405045,0.0,0.059929411574201376,0.11164389675506013,0.04704419191367324,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1688109326141406,0.09164076723612842,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04246965571768955,0.0,0.0,0.06860915691899272,0.0,0.04581437719229956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0598340828636845,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10539886983858407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15043466011762005,0.1197120613126147,0.02689558236029269,0.0,0.05107286845021679,0.2330778878820036,0.1458501636890179,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0821923473588934,0.0,0.05558147425161259,0.051026819951780884,0.06046072366911338,0.044615106601246624,0.17017069547000307,0.058644605278360386,0.0,0.0,0.047037700420136885,0.05662410241285867,0.047649776994582525,0.052516300302424185,0.05459055896873212,0.056540837604381125,0.05995149266343588,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.053356129087851235,0.0,0.0,0.061376674863588825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0527850661043786,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.029233050494628682,0.0,0.12000627175241806,0.0,0.05779349768505013,0.10878528828624276,0.15028493930890705,0.025987029608435838,0.10662514788135967,0.2818182044199051,0.09414687355902553,0.0893361282910573,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1920322046935851,0.05033176035818232,0.07101243366561788,0.05392855758091337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21434224369672705,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08491503771938035,0.056534906923117835,0.039102398703644056,0.07888270746593838,0.0,0.0,0.056570524544745635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.055816282182687534,0.05664797340922816,0.07208884357903612,0.040455076754965534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20311195374712676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05028383680917007,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05958745487345993,0.0565764686514337,0.0,0.0,0.034076295258384265,0.0,0.10504179112822687,0.11421706544630625,0.06025641086076713,0.0,0.0,0.04230058467598325,0.0,0.10766672359054708,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04400115026320441,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08189993232360744,0.0,0.0,0.11294917154543965,0.0,0.08495874388075582,0.0,0.0,0.05560805281832045,0.0,0.05818365021641556,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.039993926138037976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03533854434996493,0.03408342382942567,0.10452216314419832,0.0,0.27915127711250265,0.0,0.20168000243786527,0.15248232398963285,0.05909850851978553,0.0,0.057857855840680386,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0438891484555609,0.0,0.08444300940275852,0.042667586699707855,0.0,0.0,0.04930971659828301,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05127539748994549,0.057684688587906215,0.0387245663372296,0.0,0.0,0.07557244734101452,0.0,0.0,0.2740323420078699
mentalhealth,BPF-8,2020/04/20,"I need advice on how to take good care of my emotional health by myself(15m) I have not been doing so well Mentally and it has started to effect me greatly, each class has dropped by atleast 10 points, I only eat the equivalent to like 5 meals a week and often get very nauseous after eating even a tiny amount( my stomach hurts from hunger all the time but I am almost repulsed by the though of eating because how I feel as a result from eating). I do not feel comfortable opening up to anyone ik irl because my reputation is the fun guy. I feel like im constantly on the verge of breaking down and when i do breakdown I hyperventilate and throw up basically until my body is too tired to do it anymore. I desperately need pointers on how to cope/get my life back on track by myself. Edit-Is it possible this is caused by Marfan syndrome, I read that people with Marfans often have a higher risk for mental illness and poor quality of life(I do not have the pronounced Marfans look btw) edit 2- I have also lost all interest in my old hobbies,past time,etc.",7.068343531468536,6.408304706730768,7.5556993006993025,74.57111888111889,64.43269230769229,9.871328671328673,34.774475524475534,9.095868883498916,3.023907692307692,841,33,155,12,11,278,132,208,0.14400000000000002,0.762,0.094,-0.9159999999999999,0,0,0,0,0,0,19.0,0,0,0,2,13,12,0,1,10,0,16,12,2,6,2,28,27,15,0,2,4,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,0,1,5,8,6,0,4,1,1,1,3,3,1,0,2,4,20,9,30,25,4,23,0,2,1,0,1,11,0,3,11,106,25,3,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12141327737995145,0.0,0.0,0.12441598354576525,0.0,0.0,0.09936072862586633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12322019293592072,0.08687678266216654,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09553870408743266,0.0,0.15148031837327347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1380110292515774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12667866780948206,0.12763646940716675,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1342674723127871,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5085450881601906,0.0,0.13976178143077034,0.0,0.0,0.13856887245696894,0.08206434139435392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.188469898261312,0.08876248149622673,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1298284436589677,0.0,0.0,0.10421295821513284,0.0,0.13698337323362947,0.0,0.12302461830521368,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1320693459140887,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13300958243903654,0.0,0.13420868549560472,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1755194517469257,0.12140216339385244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10433665762481407,0.0,0.1356308886218807,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2504246337377901,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18425598240786645,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13037691324637446,0.0,0.0,0.0944958679833663,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11860835466574833,0.08613761368934474,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11745410430430707,0.14007045505554108,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12428118288320693,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08794306227485943,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09341870211660558,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1220725965944154,0.0,0.14489950250076333,0.14280429235407438,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.102517249033522,0.0,0.0,0.09966389791732493,0.0,0.11171347772842337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,patriotjeff,2020/04/20,I feel like I am at the end of my rope I'm mentally so exhausted. I am so tired of spending every moment having to decide between my physical health or mental health. I have asthma. I have anxiety. I am wiping down every frigging item that comes in my home. I cant do this for another month never mind another year.,0.8212499999999991,3.2852086250000028,3.7550000000000026,82.39000000000001,87.75,6.95,22.0625,8.07648339933343,1.75025625,248,9,46,6,8,88,47,64,0.132,0.8270000000000001,0.040999999999999995,-0.6843,0,0,0,0,0,0,6.0,0,0,0,0,2,2,0,0,1,0,8,5,0,0,1,6,11,3,0,0,1,0,1,1,0,0,5,0,1,0,2,1,0,0,2,0,1,1,2,1,0,0,0,1,10,1,8,11,1,9,0,0,0,0,0,3,0,1,6,34,12,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4287160376899394,0.15638499020907828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17609451474985313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18106036520912236,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.344474694156392,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10336370302197267,0.14604165749824696,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4345896116665632,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20505549973072512,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09987200034884616,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4120257565243144,0.0,0.20641153560120384,0.0,0.16317052784630834,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15766559062454633,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.234957103516082,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13164335520921244
mentalhealth,lakewater14,2020/04/20,"I'm lacking motivation to get up in the morning Most people have a reason to get up in the morning like say their family or their friends but I don't, the only thing keeping me going is that I'm too much of a pussy to kill myself.help",2.4354000000000013,3.822856340000001,4.3889999999999985,85.85950000000003,75.6,6.6000000000000005,26.5,7.1686216300943375,1.2542,187,7,39,2,4,64,37,50,0.126,0.768,0.106,-0.6187,0,0,0,0,0,1,2.0,0,0,2,1,1,3,1,0,5,0,3,0,0,2,0,7,9,2,1,1,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,0,1,2,0,0,1,1,1,0,0,0,1,4,2,8,9,3,5,0,0,0,0,4,4,0,2,1,28,6,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3085830286945993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.25289880135031945,0.0,0.342038855616052,0.0,0.1860324596634993,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21940626446796568,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2909510696007176,0.3621485270096748,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15991972123466966,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24062945225043164,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.24895360087946025,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.22693340520350586,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3365556858484208,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2603105399645538,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21746733837756052,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,SmotherMeWithArmpits,2020/04/20,"Everything's closed, can't receive help all the clinics aren't accepting new patients, I can't go anywhere to receive assistance, short of going to the ER but I can't afford it.

What can I do ?",3.6684615384615378,5.141124564102566,5.213333333333335,80.84000000000002,72.58974358974359,8.276923076923078,33.51282051282051,8.841846274778883,3.016035897435897,154,8,29,3,3,52,29,39,0.1,0.9,0.0,-0.3007,1,0,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,2,0,6,1,0,0,1,4,8,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,0,0,1,0,0,4,4,0,1,0,0,0,3,1,3,8,1,7,0,0,0,0,3,2,0,0,1,18,5,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4816520381034755,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6091535205889077,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.35921714597999704,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5175967007032529,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,ordinarilynightmare,2020/04/20,Is anyone else experiencing pandemic depression? This is the most difficult mental task I’ve ever been through. It’s even more difficult because I feel there is nothing to look forward to. I don’t like to vent to family or friends about how this is affecting me but I am trying really hard not to let my suicidal ideation worsen right now. I really worry that the lack of a light at the end of the tunnel is driving me to consider suicide more and more. It’s even more difficult to talk about how this is affecting me mentally because mental health does not seem to be a priority right now. I am just really losing hope right now and wishing for some hope to grab onto because I don’t see myself wanting to live through this for much longer...,7.064166666666665,6.891508194444448,7.736944444444448,71.65250000000002,64.27777777777779,11.644444444444444,35.361111111111114,11.20814326018867,4.083836111111109,596,25,108,16,8,199,86,144,0.235,0.6779999999999999,0.087,-0.9803,0,0,0,0,0,1,9.0,0,0,0,1,12,9,0,0,6,0,13,1,0,4,1,21,21,6,2,5,5,0,3,1,1,0,1,0,0,0,7,2,0,0,2,0,0,2,4,5,0,0,1,7,11,4,20,18,8,12,0,2,2,0,2,6,0,6,7,81,18,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09605131344156996,0.14075035587984347,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2512158558555197,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11831536692298628,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12021218049010413,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11475383178718936,0.0,0.12166779927308055,0.0,0.0,0.18146131880359667,0.12425775588192813,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12949888296013293,0.0,0.06945768753351694,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1061306333513088,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12305527640917235,0.0,0.0,0.146016389554232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27287601423775376,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14046869223372307,0.0,0.06711135525110623,0.0,0.12129898336484995,0.0,0.11535502003956075,0.15368031682109795,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4153056936196912,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1009817208858217,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1318088687880235,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2640055125020496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3519360807629587,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10946498257986254,0.12505520687038513,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.30051788744739105,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11041167074661316,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09326425679496607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08102355460537497,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15796710134852854,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13950447311364295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,forever-mistaken,2020/04/20,"How do I access therapy? I (23F) am from the UK. I have been suffering with mental health issues since I was 16. Since then, I have had phases where I have felt OK and phases where I've felt really down and had suicidal thoughts.

I have tried to access counselling through the NHS countless times. The first time I started having counselling through NHS, they gave me the time of an appointment to attend which didn't suit me, but I wasn't given a number to rearrange, so they took me off the list.

The second time I sought help, they put me in for three group sessions instead of 1to1, which I know wouldn't work for me as I struggle enough to open up 1to1, so a group session would be really daunting.

There have also been a few times where I've not been able to answer their initial assessment call due to being in work, so they then cancel the referral.

On top of this, the waiting list is really long, so I just can't see this working for me. I have been really struggling for the past year and it's just getting worse. I'm in an abusive relationship which doesn't help. I just feel alone and I really don't see things getting any better. 

I need good, regular therapy. However, the question is, where do I look to access this? How do I find a therapist? Is there a site for this? Also, are there any good websites for online therapy?

Thank you.",4.339172932330829,5.5168040451127816,4.952706766917295,84.48966165413535,70.57894736842105,8.306766917293233,26.781954887218053,8.6894789155246,1.8391458646616536,1060,34,211,18,19,340,139,266,0.109,0.795,0.096,-0.5364,1,1,0,0,0,0,34.0,0,1,5,6,19,8,0,2,17,1,31,1,0,2,0,26,49,16,1,3,5,0,3,0,0,2,1,0,0,0,9,6,0,1,9,0,0,3,7,3,0,3,15,6,31,5,28,30,2,30,0,1,3,0,14,14,0,1,13,148,40,5,0.10817686736303743,0.12817189861294312,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11203861015188546,0.0,0.17301800349399066,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1471279586994219,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09567364828272563,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11046067647650797,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11177562148542254,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.054697474489934436,0.0,0.20773351413336785,0.0,0.09887169698062394,0.09201518811682133,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11303589672328045,0.0,0.0,0.1814672478548136,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11498695142853588,0.0,0.0,0.14501734784589085,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11290854429452706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05945117723323828,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0957331234887944,0.09084132354471244,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.109016838831199,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08021177644558299,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1032670603657019,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10874763035110553,0.1211828488857352,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3465043562988058,0.0,0.0,0.11614147148544067,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17240591516421824,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17897004510321404,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07656814350283858,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2261798989677582,0.0,0.11832793507911332,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09959472544739212,0.3711290266113212,0.12560168073981004,0.07186790388845808,0.0,0.0,0.08588034921291013,0.3153940064735509,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12018847998348245,0.07344499202343442,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23626214346169,0.0,0.11024146965126584,0.07684574282875041,0.0,0.0,0.06966235586388203
mentalhealth,DatGuyDaz,2020/04/20,"hitting a wall? i’m not sure how to describe it, but i can be fine all day or maybe even for a couple of days and i’ll hit the wall. my mood drops and i stop talking to everyone. i attempted suicide a couple days ago after i hit the wall, and i don’t want to tell anyone in case they get worried, what is this?",0.5660869565217403,1.9076142318840608,2.9181884057971037,94.62336956521742,80.59420289855072,5.759420289855073,21.644927536231886,6.42735559955562,0.1757710144927538,238,7,58,2,6,82,51,69,0.19699999999999998,0.75,0.053,-0.9009,0,0,0,0,0,1,7.0,0,0,1,1,2,3,0,0,5,0,4,0,0,1,2,11,10,6,1,1,3,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,0,3,3,0,1,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,0,0,7,2,7,6,1,11,0,0,0,0,3,4,0,1,6,35,10,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20824472306201436,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16426335406609047,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5198748086084486,0.0,0.4545169544731501,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15516417106605948,0.0,0.0,0.2244786252481846,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12273736984213647,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2360113417016232,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19640582460307876,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2569672104431634,0.0,0.2214117836812852,0.0,0.0,0.18882189857728904,0.20533271943741851,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13856344448566227,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23857531812732266,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Nothingbutempty,2020/04/20,"Please help me im stuck in my thoughts Please help. 

It just seems like like more effort then it’s worth now. But I care about them too much to leave them. I feel so trapped. I just can’t.",-2.210182926829265,-0.7793368048780458,-1.50344512195122,114.96971036585369,112.17073170731709,2.0500000000000003,10.003048780487807,3.1291,-2.5756609756097566,145,2,40,0,8,42,32,41,0.146,0.465,0.389,0.8894,0,1,0,0,0,0,5.0,0,0,2,1,6,3,0,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,6,6,3,0,0,3,0,1,2,0,0,0,0,0,0,2,0,0,0,3,0,1,0,1,0,0,0,2,1,7,3,3,4,2,3,0,0,0,0,4,1,0,1,4,22,9,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.28111531807760937,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13941251597168453,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3696191371039811,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29782534000606825,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.29194808698042635,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2694061152355932,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2026862148131463,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6053163919414987,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2510054918938518,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21889119503135265,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,Flannelgraphiti,2020/04/20,"My family is in crisis and I need support. My wife suffers from mental health issues, became violent, I filed a restraining order to protect me and our child from her, she blames me for her violent episode, I want to reconcile and get her help, she hates me. I am heartbroken.  I feel like I have had to make impossible decisions and am living an impossible existence.  I feel frustrated that we have never really nailed down a diagnosis (unless my wife has hid that from me which is possible), and we have definitely not found a medication regimen that works well.  It is difficult to help manage her mental health because on her best days she is still stubborn, fearful of being committed (to the hospital), outspoken and unfiltered (a bit rude, really), and afraid of being controlled, abused or taken advantage of.

Alcohol is a contributing factor.  She has been sober for many years and just recently started drinking again.  This quickly led to belligerent behavior, then anger, then an intensely violent and hate fueled rage directed at me.  I was able to get the kids out of the house with a relative.  She called the police in a drunken state to report that I had hidden her wine.  I did not report the violence to the police, but I did leave the house on their recommendation.  After the next day, after she was sober, she still considered the incident to be my fault for antagonizing her.  It is absoutely bizarre to me.  I am not violent, I do not yell, I was not drinking, I try to de-escalate.  I believe that she honestly doesn't remember the events, and can't seem to realize how destructive her behavior is.  I got a temporary restraining order from her and it is in effect now.  She is overcome with hatred for me and can't understand why I would be so terrible as to have her removed from the house.

She knows that alcohol is a problem, but slipped up.  I expect her to stay sober for a long time.  But, over the last couple years when she has not been drinking, there has been a slowly growing attitude of hate towards me and others.  She seems almost obsessed with hating certain politicians, co-workers, family members, etc.  She can't watch TV without feeling real hatred towards fictional characters.  She submerges herself in social media and political news as an escape but it fuels her hatred.

Sometimes she seems delusional and paranoid.  She worries about people having information about her and thinks people are spying on her.  Sometimes she seems to think she is a bigger influence on local and even national politics than I think she is.  She left her first husband under dramatic circumstances that unfortunately parallel what I am seeing now.  She alleged serious abuse, rape and, controlling behavior, but now i question her perspective on those things.

I and my child are safe.  I have a network of family support.  I have a therapist.  She has family (mine and hers) that are there to support her, but she finds it difficult or impossible to trust the people who care about her.  She has access to psychiatric help, but is distrustful.  I am not perfect but I am terribly understanding, apologetic, slow to anger, and just not really that bad.

Can anyone recommend places for support?  My family is good, but they don't have experience with this kind of psychosis.  Her family are supportive, but unfortunately are untrusting of psychiatric medicine and think vitamins and diets are the answer.",7.0704456141760765,8.538959408566724,7.602024350062282,66.9289713505043,64.46952224052718,11.786860609957008,35.562703419455936,11.545919441582146,4.840276762968619,2719,126,425,89,41,896,291,607,0.21,0.687,0.10300000000000001,-0.9978,1,0,6,0,2,0,84.0,3,0,2,8,19,46,17,3,31,0,62,12,0,7,4,100,96,43,0,5,24,3,3,1,0,1,6,1,0,3,22,30,7,7,24,5,0,3,15,29,1,1,13,6,92,17,70,78,3,55,0,1,2,1,64,22,0,8,27,342,114,4,0.06665115095008113,0.15794142999797622,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1424596209125776,0.06674149993769879,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04660403446074607,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05565092702288266,0.04062992298555252,0.0,0.0,0.07509302303228757,0.06994627087287388,0.0,0.07276579434073875,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06805827716545079,0.0,0.06795529045996182,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1495098665058313,0.0,0.07374823080111281,0.0,0.08596895690131612,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1958782607187036,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07433365174541169,0.044022456600552984,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06519761498232432,0.376996639891248,0.07500107494181242,0.1011024736901145,0.04761559555626762,0.0,0.0,0.060917944480965165,0.05669343494938276,0.0,0.0730795467980627,0.0,0.0,0.06964495089322029,0.0,0.0,0.05590382317448982,0.0533070141132936,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2632168509312131,0.0,0.141694113423212,0.0,0.0,0.13402458460762595,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23071943832470976,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06956648507922869,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06940691715906669,0.03662972948398134,0.05432958383493159,0.0,0.07057394518966724,0.07241667052589881,0.0,0.0,0.032562385674533734,0.0,0.05885418739461365,0.058984171201417135,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04449016081384826,0.06757380575158,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06714402252549152,0.1343373672793494,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04942098389581802,0.051405476525823286,0.0,0.07088425517623285,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13862254771870752,0.0,0.06963626676848939,0.0,0.0,0.07513915817676331,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06377615002467422,0.0,0.0,0.0746645428965694,0.0,0.0,0.07586360157513332,0.1280953019966464,0.0,0.0658099707084417,0.0,0.07550276116107295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.05311233795361099,0.2427068183311621,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.06794245481624804,0.0,0.0,0.13183938511029414,0.0,0.04717602769405869,0.07104125869496772,0.10645539049107268,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3781746812313941,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07738712339005488,0.0442800630791075,0.17082946509316785,0.0,0.0,0.03886482211334995,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.04525175639865177,0.0,0.0,0.1387723974362407,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.03931257570213313,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.059927389185563035,0.0,0.06014229680909111,0.0,0.0,0.06424933106401,0.0,0.09704566340607128,0.06768747911366588,0.0,0.047347065319994906,0.0,0.0,0.08584231193606084
mentalhealth,yureichan,2020/04/20,"How is your memory affected? As someone who went through A&D, i know that i don't remember some of my memories during that time. It was rather patchy and hazy. My SO would mention an event and i'd have to scan my brain hard to remember, but there's none. It's not that big of a deal for me because i was mostly in school that time and nothing significant really happened. I was wondering, how is it for other people? Was it the same, or worst? Did you get to remember those that you forgot?  

P.S. English is not my first language so i'm sorry.",1.939,4.1718869000000005,3.6500000000000017,86.70500000000001,80.0,7.272727272727272,24.54545454545455,8.296473431620573,1.6804545454545456,429,16,87,9,11,143,76,110,0.11900000000000001,0.8809999999999999,0.0,-0.8971,0,0,0,0,0,0,17.0,0,3,0,1,6,1,0,0,3,0,11,1,1,3,0,21,18,10,0,2,5,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,0,12,3,0,1,5,0,0,1,4,1,0,1,7,2,12,0,10,10,5,7,0,0,1,0,6,2,0,4,4,67,24,1,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2085432009860873,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11732907126227644,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.21486227175489372,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19843005631622665,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1637164823483582,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10055861303643156,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17020224736248002,0.0,0.17241699867043253,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10577751137928992,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18468195934166295,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13343576675110427,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12330241450922408,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.6540993578488589,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.19479181760149414,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16308079887557322,0.0,0.0,0.2154565111558534,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2244638014674259,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17842336055701102,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.20872754297876603,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13672650088371302,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,FridayPanda,2020/04/20,"How do I get the courage telling my parents that I think I have a diagnose? It's complicated. I am a teen under 18 who has a really complicated relationship with talking about mental health with my parents. 

The situation is so that I am pretty sure from the years of research I've done that I have ADHD, and I do not mean that I googled online ADHD test and got the answers that I do.

 I've been reading on hundreds of forums made by doctors and my differences between me and the rest of my family and friends are basically explained by ADHD, I really think I have it.

How do I tell my parents that I think I have ADHD without making them freak out or get mad at me?

(This is far from everything that has to do with the situation, don't hesitate to ask any questions)",6.7291558441558434,5.799789935064938,7.9317857142857155,72.48196428571431,65.23376623376622,11.076623376623377,36.782467532467535,10.411451182825502,3.745418181818183,606,27,118,13,8,209,85,154,0.022000000000000002,0.8640000000000001,0.114,0.9089,3,0,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,0,1,0,4,5,1,0,9,0,19,3,0,4,1,24,30,9,0,0,3,3,0,0,1,0,3,0,0,0,11,9,0,0,7,1,0,0,3,2,0,0,4,0,22,3,19,26,1,6,0,0,0,0,13,5,0,2,1,91,33,4,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5777820199979343,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08173359391974863,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11236180005956796,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12199072663183065,0.0,0.12557338741545032,0.0,0.1230199679284236,0.0,0.12299650904056555,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10801938214715168,0.0,0.1133048130240676,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09285880536666813,0.0,0.12558904728651754,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.09612724297044774,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12775677549268874,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1137270631401799,0.08022802570141638,0.0,0.0,0.1309225812883951,0.0,0.0,0.12112365473169465,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.4003716489097884,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12227684665009952,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.13464075554939187,0.0,0.12022292584006712,0.0,0.15399409656466204,0.0,0.0,0.12903951025414956,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27019809213367424,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1132780301806453,0.0,0.0,0.09660449127944416,0.21010341548024747,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2310394669070496,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1158592571842931,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.07739867739623474
mentalhealth,Jealousx,2020/04/20,"Therapy app idk 😐 To all mental health professionals, please if you ever wonder how to do something different remember I’ve been doing research on how does online therapy works and it totally sucks. So please if someone out there wants to take on a project think of an app somewhat like skipe where you can actually talk to professionals. Or even better, students who can work for free and make up a little practice idk But PLEASE!",5.960801687763713,7.9276051012658275,6.124746835443041,74.60247890295359,67.60759493670886,9.317299578059073,32.154008438818565,9.725611199111238,3.3478590717299586,349,15,58,8,6,111,63,79,0.064,0.7509999999999999,0.18600000000000005,0.8943,1,0,1,0,0,0,5.0,0,2,0,3,7,4,1,0,3,0,5,1,0,3,3,18,11,9,0,3,4,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,0,2,3,0,0,3,0,1,0,0,1,0,0,1,0,2,4,10,10,3,7,0,0,0,0,4,6,1,5,2,38,4,7,0.0,0.0,0.17087186527085016,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.15486128902328636,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18294172197341452,0.0,0.0,0.1532307628965009,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.11565157625091588,0.1583875332097682,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18612259319786215,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.08554477692875424,0.17549571128255148,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1168802839075012,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.17645912421729565,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.5766200482272421,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1983536134479336,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.14836124826965574,0.13480015889982214,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1316530415955246,0.14073835506688553,0.0,0.0,0.4004831040145035,0.0,0.0,0.11219669705959516,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.10327822882964788,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.18988795148235135,0.2549490602731832,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0
mentalhealth,LucyJonesStruggling,2020/04/20,"""Lockdown shows you who really cares about you"" The more I see these posts the more upset it makes me feel. Especially when it's people who I have started to recently lose contact with.

This lockdown is having a massive impact on my own and so so so many others mental health. Either beginning to start pressures or  enhancing them. 

Are people realising this when they share/type/send this stuff for others to see?? 

Mini rant over.",4.016867088607594,6.8064175696202565,4.542262658227848,80.08529272151901,75.83544303797468,6.987974683544303,23.799050632911392,8.07648339933343,1.6923025316455702,344,11,57,6,8,109,62,79,0.13,0.83,0.04,-0.7476,0,2,0,0,0,0,11.0,0,2,2,1,6,4,0,2,3,0,4,1,0,1,0,6,12,7,0,0,2,0,1,0,0,0,1,0,0,0,11,2,0,0,1,1,0,0,0,3,0,0,0,3,8,1,8,12,4,9,0,1,2,0,7,2,0,1,6,45,19,0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2529608755420203,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.12544998381047706,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2637253608076637,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.27756745065681193,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.16561286040131304,0.251540813834021,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2500327628282001,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3440112933414666,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.23761722174310504,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.1589432283420845,0.0,0.2449750077900185,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3954171461821652,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.3512217868339425,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.2840223178432337,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0,0.0